Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1877-12-05
OFFICIAL PAPER OF LYON COUNTY.
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

A prosperous baker is a rising
man.
What tbout that blossom on your
nose!
You never hear If 18-ca:rot soup
nowadays.
The fashionable fall color in tom
cats is yeler.
Sealed proposals-Kissing the girl
for consenting.
Mean speed, is running away from
ones creditors.
If great city is a mart, are all the
inhabitants martyrs.
Keeping wake is religious duty,
especially IN church.
Faith and first-class earthquakes
will move mountains.
Nassar college is sweetly referred
to as sugar refinery"
Stanley Mathews looks like Grant,
but he feels like thunder.
Sere and yelo leaves are natural
enough on the elder trees.
Quarrels would not last long if the
wrong was all on one side.
The hard times don't make rascals,
they only bring them to the surface.
Unknown men are always coming
to their deaths in an unknown man
ner.
A New York manager is playing
"rhe Mothers Secret" Instead Of
keeping it.
"Too much birthstone in til.
match, d" is the remark when divorce
is applied for.
There is popular superstition that
trade drummers belong to the brass
band of men.
A fellow stopped at Il market and
asked for about three feet of blow
lonely sausage.
mo, madam" said a grocer to au
applicant for credit, 81 wouldn't even
trust my own feelings"
Senator Morton died leaving a for
tune Of less than $4,000. Other
Senators should go and do likewise.
1t has been found that tramps will
not split wood, but If you have an
open shed they will lay in your coal.
A steamboat captain says they are
now manufacturing ice in New Or
leans cheaper than God Almighty
can freeze it,
A recent Methodist Conference
discussed whether they should pay
their debts on send more money to
the poor heather.
A woman may not he able to
sharpen pencil, but she can pack
more articles in trunk than "a man
can IN n one-horse wagon.
Mrs. Brooks, WIN became fIm1rs
bv making the "Dreaming Iplanihe'
in butter, is moulding "Thc Coming
Man" All, life is butter span.
The japanese believe the first hu-
man being was woman. This idea
is in harmony with mother earth d
does away with the rib business.
The report that Cleopatra's Needle
was to be brought To b iston praba-
bly, arose from the fact that the city
government voted to have big
sewer.
After stating that the lady whom
Stanley was to murry has welded
another, the Worcester Press asks:
"What shall il profit a man If he
finds 100000 heathens and loses
his best airl".
Barnum dropped around to the
White House the other day to invite
Mrs. Hayes and the children to tie
show and took occasion to say that
he would rather be IA circus than n
President, But Barnum is hum
bug, you know.
A man il Indiana got INTO trouble
for kissing his nelghbor's wife. II
he had ever read the Commandments
he would have known he should not
covet or kiss his neiohbor's wife, or
his maid servant, or his horse, or his
OK, or-any other thing that is his
neighbor's.
A well-known conjurer had Il bright
little boy on the platform to assist'in
his experiments. "Sir," said the con
jurer, "do you think | could put the
twenty shillings the lady '.ohls into
your pocketl"."No," said the boy,con-
fidently, 81 think not. | know YOU
couldn't said the little fellow, with
great firmncss. "Why not1" she
cause the pocket is all torn out"