The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1877-02-21
FROM THE DETROIT FREE
PRESS HUMORIST.
The Third House

Q
sing a few days ago in order to visit
the State House. He came home
Yesterday noon chuck full of impor-
tance, and when his little brother
ran to meet him at the gate William
coldly waved him back and said:
i refer you to the Committee on
Fisheries. bub, and how's my dog "
His mother was glad TO see him,
and when she asked if he had enjoy
ed himself he replied:
ooh, I suppose so, though | now
move to strike out all after the en-
acting clause"
What sort of talking is that,
Willie, dear?' she asked In great
surprise.
Never mind the talk, mother
but move the previous question and
bring on the pancakes"
The hired girl came in with the
dinner and wanted to know how he
liked Lansing. He looked at her
with great dignity and replied :.y
Il now move to lay your petition
on the table, Hannah, for future
consideration"
She got mad about it, and William
slyly informed his mother that it
was his opinion that Hannah's title
should be made to conform to the
body of the bill. He went out to
see the boys after dinner, and a
house painter asked him where No.
657 was.
"We'll have a call Of the House
and see," replied the boy as he look
ed around.
Whose house?" asked the pain
ter.
''Or, you can raise to question
of privilege continued the lad.
Il don't want no sass !'' said the
painter, who thought the boy was
making fun of his red nose.
s'Of course not. Let's pass the
bill to a third reading, or else go
into committee of the whole and
debate it,
Il think you need dressing down,
growled the painter" And he bang
ed William into snow-bank and
pushed heap Of snow down behind
his coll ar.
Have the minority no rights p
yelled the boy as he kicked the pain
ter on the shin.
He would have been wollOped
had not his mother appeared. The
painter moved away at the sight OF
her, but called out:
''Pll see you again, boy ~
81 refer the whole subject to faith
er, with instructiong to report a bill
to walk you into the Police Court"
replied the Representative, and he
went IN to tell his mother the differ
ence between sespending the rules
and rushing a bill, or referring it TO
the Committee on Cornfelds till
some one came around with the ci-
gars.
HE SAFE WAY.-The wife of q
man living near Topeka, Kansas,
reached Detroit on her way home
from the East yesterday. finding
herself short Of funds, having lost
$50 at Niagara Falls. She went TO
hotel and telegraphed her husband
to forward her $50 at once. He isn't
the kind of a man to rush headlong
into any financial enterprise, and hs
stopped to find out the cost of tele-
graphing money. When he had
ascertained he waited till night and
aud sent q half-rate message saying
that he would forward the money by
mail. This wasn't entirely satisfac-
tory TO q wife paying three dollars
per day for board, bat she had TO
wait. In about three days the
looked-for letter arrived, and the
swallowing her false teeth, The
husband had inc!osed the one-half
portion of three different ten-dollar
bills, and explained in his letter:
"If these reach you safely l will
forward the other halves upon re-
ceipt ola telegram"
The way that little woman busted
over to the telegraph Office and
sent him bowieknives and daggers
and bullets made the stoical opera
tor wOdder if she was not some
escaped lunatic. Over half the
money will be used mp for bread by
the time she gets it, and how she is
ia reach hpme on the balance is
what puzzels her.
Touching her Heart.
Yesterday morning a woman liv-