The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1877-06-19
DAsoo anIsr.
4 Sunday Lunch Of Good 9hinGs
0ondWich0d Togothor.

The widow aits BY he vacant chair,
A co'nb;ng her sssaa4is Of yellow hair,
| While her soal by thought II vexed,
Not u the man Who sat there Last,
Not III the joys Of the buried past,
Bnt al who would sil there next.
Lake Superior il two te<t lower than it
has been tor yean.
Freedom Centennial Stackpole Is small
hoy Of Salmon FALL, n. II.
The London papers employ seventy four
Parliamentary reporters, the 1sm~s leading
with fifteen.
II 10 computed that . drinking man
spends one year out oi every fifteen in
wipine Cd his mouth after taking drink.
A little Philadelphia boy startled lady
friend Of the family the other day by re-
marking chat he Wa -four years oil with
his clothes on
Talmsge says "vi<dom comes BY hard
knocks That's Why he throws himsei:
around sd in the pulpit.
The Paris Exhibition Commissioner have
decided to refuse any newspaper the priv
ilese to be priate,l in the palace.
! The demand for summer board on Mt.
Washington II greater than the accommo-
dation, . number having been turned
away.
| The hornets nest around Fred. Doug
la~' head seems 10 have adjourned. Such
hair a he has for such picnic, too
The lons-sighted merchant Who has
wasted no money in advertising now has
plenty Of time to wander in the COW pas
ture- looking for greens.
Crawfish are sometimes eaten. One way
to cook them is 10 boil them in salt and
water till they are done to sunrise turn
and then give them to the hogs.
Somebody says always face the person
you are talking to. II il evident that wri-
ter never stood in front Of the man whn
comes into the Office ~ soon n he gets
sober to have his name kept out Of the
police reports. Only man with his nose
on the back Of his head could do il.
| MIR. Plough appeared 1t . recent suit
in Arkansas a claimant for portion Of an
estate. The Judge ssgely decided that he
wzs entitled to his share.
| Plato or Epicttetns never said 4
shrrwdes thing than Zach. Chandler, when
he advised . young politician, "Never
hunt for ducks with /. brass band.''
An aged colered man applies for Office
in Washington, on the ground that he has
"been bitten BY three kinds Of snakes.' y
Appoint him Whisky Gauger.
The beautiful Cleopatra must have
been careless creature about the house
Here this needle Of her, after all, II found
lying around With the point broken of.
The regatta season begins 10 excite
our pnnster. He observes that young ladies
vho never had . Sign Of bean, eviace
/ remarkable eaSerness iOr beau-traces.
-~Et tuber-rooty," mournfully sighed q
professor Of the Agricultural Collese, on
noticing the havoc made BY the bug on
one of the potato patches Of that institu-
tiOns.
At an up-eonntry shooting match the
other day ore masksman sent bullet into
. drove Of cattle, and then actually had the
ausiaciiy to claim that he had made bull
sigh.
-Closhes dost make The man, hat some
Of the wont looking old sooksd
ham ever dealt cut 10 the American public
are covered in . way TO make . nan's
mouth water.
III the salt in the ocean should Be
spread over the land, IL would cover il to
the depth Of 700 iees, bat it would kill
business. So il il jass a we'll perhaps to
leave il where il il.
"A correspondent writes IA inquiring
Why . whisky sauger % always called
"Majos." We don't know, unless il il BE-
cause il il his o6icial duty 10 always Major
the whisky.
A man who shot New York lawyer
began to prosper right away, Lands. who
shot q New Jerry editor, Lost hia property,
his vile gos divorce, and he II fast BE-
coming . lunatic.
"A North Casolina man Thought that
cucumber peeline would be good for his
wiies dyspepsia. but when they killed her
he saw how easy 1t u not - understand the
human system.
The impossa.es Of . voman, head
clothing i illustrated in the case Of Tie
Rutland girl Who Lost oa her
hat while out driving, and never knew il
tiE she was told 81 il several miles after
ward.
As specimen Of the genuine westsrn
humor. We can't iorbear nentioning ths in
dorsement Of IN applicant for Consu:ship
that some Ohio men sent to The Sssts De-
partment. Their recommendaaioa ~ that
Mr--be ssss TO Patagonia, and that upon
his arrival these, our relaaioas With list
country Be Immediately saepesded.
No end Of schemes fnsneial,
From time to time we've had
So0e Aeesing. some sulseaneial,
Some good ones, and some bad.
YET, wosss than all together,
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