The Red Cloud chief., 1877-06-21
HUMOROUS.

HUMOROUS.
A young lady being asked. upon he
return from church. what the text Va,
unhesitasingly replied: Blessed are th'
dreasmakeB!"
History says: Cesar had his Brutus.
But somehow or other We also hai
the impression that Brutus rather bad
Caesar.
Why n . young lady OF seventeen
brief summers like the Sultan's Asia
tic possessions-ehy Because she il q
she minor.
THE Sultan" says an exchange, -eats
bis state dinners frUm golden dishes.'
Yes. and whats more. he drinks water
from a Golden Horn. :
Some men can never take q joke
There Wa an old doctor who, when
asked what va good for mosquitoes,
wrote hack, How do you 1ppBe ]
can tell unless ] know whAt-S tha
mosquitoY" -
A spinster lady Of fifty remarked The
other day that she could 60 slone 1T SIX
months. YES" said her hateful half
brother, land you've been euing il
alone ever since, and never euca,red
anybody"
1t is told for a fact that a little faxen
haired boy Of 3 years, who had passed
the afternoon at IN art museum. look
ing up IN his msthers face, said: IF
the mammas, when they die, turn into
mummies, do all the papas turn into
puppiesT
Great place, that Black Hill country.
Beside gold and silver, "a mountain Of
isinglass" has just been discovered. The
accounts do not mention the matter, but
We understand there are indications of
type metal and a Hswing well of hair
dyei
When a man puts on a fresh shirt,
collar, in the morning now, he sadly
and interrogatively huns: "Wilt thou,
o. v lit Thou notY" The s%hirt-collar, with
a commendable desire not to be Obsti-
nate. before evening approaches gener-
ally willis.
Cincinnatian, trying to study the Eu-
ropean situation from a var map: Il
can make it out pretty well, but there's
one o them Generals that / never heard
Of before i mean this X. Danube.
They've got his name down in three
places, too, by Jimmy"
Is there anything that will make grain
come up quick" asked the gentleman
farmer of the old husbandman. Well,
no, i don't know of nothin' that'll do it."
was the genial old fellows reply, "un-
less it's crowsw Then the gentleman
farmer wanted to know where he could
get some.
A youthful dandy, having been term
ed an "old bachelor" appealed to an ell
derby gentleman to decide whether he
should be called old or not, giving his
age-"26." Said the elderly gentleman,
1T is owing to how you take it. Now
for a man it is young enough; but for
a goose it is rather old"
Scene at the church door: Lady to
sexton-"They say our poor minister is
very ill; pray what is the matter"
Sexton (grufiy) -"Gou madam" Lady
lin a concer ned v~Oice)-"Is there no
cure?" Sexton-"Yes madam give him
my salary" Exit both characters and
close of scene.
A young man who married a woman
with seven sisters, and went to live in
the family, came out the other day, and
sadly asked a neighbor whether it was
better to cut your strawberry beds bias
with inside plaitings, or pompadour
with nothing but plain insertion.
Wife (who has become an amateur
painter)-"What do you think of the
sketch, dearY" Husband-"Well. the
drawing of it involved no breach of the
second commandment, for it is not the
likeness of any thing that is in the Hea-
ven above, or in the earth beneath, or
in the waters under the earth"
what line of business do you think l
had better adoptp" asked a young as
pirant for the stage of the leading
man" well" said the old stager, gaz-
ing critically at the youths elegant cos
tune. Il should say the clothes line
would suit Won best.
"Oh. heavens, save my wife" shouted
a man whose wife had fallen overheard
in the Hudson River, recently. They
succeeded in rescuing her. And her
husband tenderaly embraced her, say
ing, MY dear. if you'd been drowned,
what should / have done? l amt 60
ing to let you carry the pocket-book
again."
But / pass" said a minister, one Sun
day, in dismissing one theme of his sub
ject to take up another, Then l make
1t spades" yelled a man from the gal
lery who was dreaming the happy hours
away in an imaginary game of euchre.
1t is needless to say that he went on
m tho rowt Aoo1 hospn oooSofo1 hv ono