The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1877-01-03

SpeuuluS Sefeial uaSS Will lie iS'o
tons here. One morning last weel
he walked to the back door Of Mr.. w
II. Parker's house, when his feet slip
ped from under him, and lie wen
humping down the high steps to tn
ground. After he recovered hi
breath a little, he resumed a standing
position on the ground, and reflected
upon the uncertainty OF humansscal
cu!ations whenif made on all ice foot
ing.
If we thought it would do any goot
we would caution boys about the care
less handling of blunderbusses, pow
der-horns and other explosives tina
put in appearance about Christina!
time, but it would all be to no par
pose, for they are bound to blow off 6
certain number OF fingers in spite o
all the advice and warning that are
gratuitously offered. We say 60 il
boys and blow your brains out if yol
want to.
III. w. g." the Florida cores
pondent Of the atlanta Constitution
has successfully eluded the "snap" o
the alligator, and is now spending his
time with the "%Injuns," and writing
up st. Augustine, the ''oldest Ameri
can city," There is no telling wha1
may become of this correspondent
who writes interesting letters from the
''land of flowers"
Chicken thieves arc reported as
quite active of late. They don't seem
TO DO at all partial about breeds, bu1
take any sort they can lay hands on
This is the way to do it. We don't
like to see too much fastidiousness
among the chicken thief fraternity.
A foot asleep is only perverted sen,
sibility due to inactive downward
pressure, and which can be easily
thrown off by rapidly exercising the
drOwsy member in the direction ol
the form Of o ma or boy who leaves q
door open ut shis season of the year.
MES. PHILLIPS, of Ninety-SiX,
died last Tuesday, leaving an infant
only two weeks old. We are panied
at this death and extend our sympa-
thies to a bereaved husband, VINO so
recently led q happy bride to the ny
mcncal alter.
THE merry gobbler at the Aston
House has piped his last note. ON
Saturday his head went off and his
body was ''gobbled" up on Mon
day by the festive epicureans, who
satisfied their astronomical wants al
that hotel board.
1t pays to make people happy, If 1t
can lie done on small capital. If our
delinquent subscribers would send us
their dues at once, they would create
an amount of happiness III the Press
and Banner office which would con-
vert it into q veritable paradise. Try
it..
Mr.. A. w. LYNCH left US yester-
day morning. He will teach school
during the present year at Johnson's,
on the Charlotte, Columbia and Au-
gusta Railroad. We wish he COULD
lave remained with us another year.
BLACK EYEs.-All of our eXchang-
es have promised to give their numer-
GUS delinquents black eyes on
the beginning of the new year.
That's right, gentlemen. We
"whacked" fifty last week.
THE WinsJorough Ncws and Her
uLd grows eloquent in addressing de-
linqucnts. He pours out his sorrows
to the length of h%alf-column, when
the editor becomes too full for further
utterancc.
RECKLESS DRIvING.-Some OF our
sleigh riders went through town yes
tcrday al u breakiieck speed-Ed. No
bic, IT,, Esq, for instance, when lie
drove Mr.. John A. C%alhoun's mule.
WILL the EyJcrton Gazette send us
Il good barn-burner? If he, the barn
burner, would cone over now he
would be All eligible Republican can
didate for the next election.
WHAT would the respectable Re-
publicans of the North say, if any
uody should propose to them to elect a
Georgia barn-burner to the State Leg
islaturc?
WE will pay any reasonable amount
for all original newspaper dun. Some
Of our exchanges grow eloquent n
write half q column on the subject but
never produce anything new.
DO THE figures, "77" stand after
your name on the paper? If not see
to it at olce Don't let the Post Mas
ter know that you are behind with
the printer. u
SOME nervous people in town jump
ed out Of bed when the church
hell WAS tolled at twelve o'clock on
Sunday night. We had not retired.
SYMPATHIsED wITH.-Mr. Webb's
pupils regret his absence exceedingly.
They want to put snow down his
back during the Christmas holidays.
SOME people make a great stir
about a little snow being put down
their backs. That is putting Oh airs.
for il let alone it would soon melt.
The "man on the fence" got off and
voted several weeks ago and returned
to his roost, where he still sits shlver-
ing and undivided in his mind.
Recommendations for the appoint
ment OF nen to fill the various offices
of responsibility and trust, in our
country have been made.
If YOU play with some peoples
children, you do so at your W risk
and if you notice some older people
you do so at your regret.
The coming legislature should have
appointed q competent commission to
inquire into the causes and proven
ton of hog cholera.
Reader, al you not express to your
neighbor your satisfaction with the
Press and Banner and get him to sub
scribe for it?
THE Register says that the evidence
of MIR. Gufln, the e~x-Shcriff, before
the Congressional committee, was
stricken out.
GoOD.-Many taxpayers express
their Willingness to pay the one-fourtil
tax rate called for by the Constitutions
al House.
WE insist on w. H. Heard telling
the Congressional Committee all he
knows about burning Georgia barns.
CAPT. n. S. KERR and his family
have returned to their old homestead.
They meet q hearty welcome back.
We learn that Mr.. Lewis Simpkins
was stabbed during the Christmas
holidays by a negro at Chappells.
Mr.. r. M. HADDoN will taberna-
Gle for the next twelve months at the