The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1877-02-14
TELEPHONE INTERVIEWS.
An Imaginative interviewer Takes the
Opinions of the Country Through the
New Invention.

lDDSlOl NOlANopOhOthNN Va wv
Times.
When the editor of the Times told me, on
Thursday, that he wanted me TO interview
all the prominent men in the country, be-
gan. in my mind, to pick out comfortable
sleeping car births, and also in my mind, to
pack six very large Saratoga trunks. But it
was not TO be so.
'sThe telephone" said he 'sYou can sit in a
telegraph office where the wires come inland
talk with anybody at the other end OF the
wire You can hear his voice-can even
distinguish his voice, if you know il from
hundred others. There are many OF these
telephones about the country. Nearly every
man of prominence has a telephone in his
house. But the only cOndenSing telephone
is in Boston, Here is list Of the nOtabili-
ties who have private telephones, and here
is "A thousand dOller note to pay your ex
penses. You must 20 to Boston,
Ten hours afterward l was i'll Boston. Be
fore another sun had come up out of the
harbOr had chartered the telephone.
AT O'Clock this evening said the tele-
phone man, you shall interview the CONT
nent."
Ats o'clock We went up to the telegraph
office The clerks were ready for us. They
took US into room that bristled with wires
like an armory with contract rifles. The
telephone was under my companions arm.
It was very small, very compact and very
it; it would be dangerous. My efforts to ex-
plain EdiSon's quadruplex telegraphy, once,
drove half of New York to distraction. But
it's very scientific instrument. You talk
into il and somebody at the other end of the
line answers you. That's the short OF it.
You can talk across the continent if you
have wire, and no sewing society is COM
plete without one. The telephone man I'M
wrapped the machine. busted il and con-
Dected IL with the first wire.
The circuit was hardly complete before
the air grew warm; it began TO look blueiSh
and hazy; there was a terrible rumbling.
and in a few seconds, as soon as the machine
got down to business, there bounced against
our ears such a string of names of nameless
demOniac horrors that several ladies in the
party tainted. The sounds grew louder and
quicker and worse. The clergymen who
had come to see the experiment were indig-
nant.
IF YOU can't make a more grammatical
and less blasphemous machine than that,
said one of them to the telephone man,
Boston is no place for YOU
The operator in frenzy unhitched the
wire and the sounds ceased. He looked at the
label under the wire.
Its Moody's tabernacle wire, and Moody
is preaching" he shouted. The phenomenon
was explained
Now name your victim said the oper-
ator, calming himself, land wei begin.
| took the Rev. DR.. Deems The Deems
wire was fastened on, and the music began:
"Eighty-seven, eighty eight eighty-nine,
ninety. Hold on, there's another bad note.
That's the third. It's all very we'll to leave
a man $40, 600 but | call it q shabby trick to
put so much of it in counterfeits that fell
low can't use, except in collection boxes.
There's another. Put this pile in the safe,
my son. and come back for more. Blessed,
harN,,r- Cor.,,OIora ohaI1 a. 70
think of thee?'
Rash man! DR.. Deems was counting his
money in his private telephone room. A
loud call along the wire awoke him to the
situation.
well" he answered, "what do you
want?'
''What do you think of the condition OF
the poor in New York, DOCTOR
Hang the poorl They're frauds. What
business has any man to be poor! But must
away. Our Bengalese mission society meets
at9"
Then We tried the president The Grant
family wire was attached. His excellency
answered the summons:
"The president of the United States sends
greeting. God bless our noble land. The
purity of our institutions shall be preserved
"A little more sugar, please The brain of
the nation has produced another miracle.
cork that gin. Heaven bless you my sub
jects.' Give me light
There was a mystery about the presidents
hearty greeting. The words in brackets
came in much lower tone than the others
| asked the operator how it was
'The loud words" he replied ''are ut
tered while the speaker has his mouth to the
machine; tine others. while his head is
turned away" That made it clear
~ Chandler" the next wire in the row
was labeled, and we called him out.
''Sir," he replied in a deep bass voice that
echoed through the rooms, 81 decline TO
communicate. The telegraph Wire is an in
yention of Satan. No man can trust it and
be happy. | have tried il and know But
bless you, my dear fellOw-bless any man
who inyents telegraph line that keeps no
copies of its messages. IL is prayer meeting
time. Good night"
l suggested George Francis Train. The
Train wire was put on.
THE eternal TRUTHS the machine began,
"of thousand generations come rumbling
down through time. They reach us through
the telephone. IOuSmy dear sir, who have
invented such blessing are greater than all
the Romans that ever danced on the Cam
pagna. You are the only sane man in the
world exceptGeorge Francis Train"
'Try our next president, / suggested.
(Which one2" said the operator.
We Tipped a cent. Heads was for Tilden.
tails for Hayes. 1t came up heads, but Mr..
Tilden was not at home, so we tried Mr..
Hayes. The machine Immediately answered
our summons
eff" il began, "Sumacstump and Yellow
mud parishes have given me the majorities
returned by the board, then the commission
can have no alternative but TO declare me
elected. Again, if the 81 white men in Bull
doze county so overawed and frightened the
1890 colored voters that the latter were
afraid to approach the polls, then, of course,
the election was a fraudulent one, and We
must have another. But / have put every
thing in the hands of Providence and Mr..
Grant They will look out for my interests
/ am convinced"
An ice gorge in the Susquehanna discon-
nected Mr.. Hayes's wire, and the rest Of his
l.. Il. Ii