Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1877-11-08
The Stnry Teller*
THAT LITTLE WIDOW.
BY ROBERT c. MEYERS.

and deep in her fortles-one OF the Klno VINO
smooth their aprons down while they talk to
YOU. Then the little cigar shop at the cor
ner which she kept, and where she ratified on
about different brands of tobacco, and talked
of the weather to her customers, and the kind
ness which any tale of sorrow told by vagrants
called forth from her-the many times her
fat little hand went into the drawer for change
to be bestowed on some charitable plea-all
SseDt to make up the best tempered, the most
motherly and the incest little woman you
would ever chance to meet.
So thought DR.. Ash, who lived next door,
and who often went in for little snuff, you
know, but who invariably settled his wig
more rakishly before popping into the shop
He used to say to her, my! you must be
lonely here. Widow Thorn ?"
"Oh! not at all, sir, thanking you!" she
waplc reply.
II wonder you never married a second
time, Widow Thorn !"
"Well, it is a wonder, isn't it, doctor But
you see, I'm such queer old body that l
guess not many could fancy me-"
"Madam, there you must stop! l cannot
hear the divine sex disparaged," returned the
doctor. He was, as they say, of the old school.
She laughed. ,..,,
Cant q woman speak against herself2''
she asked.
."Nol She never speaks against herself un'
less she means to fatter herself by contradlc'
tory disparagement when some one is BY"
"Sir, you are too plain"
"Widow Thorn, was always called plain,
and this wigs too big for me-"
TAen she laughed at him and what prom
ised to be quarrel, ended in merry "Good'
Bly,"
Then there was the baker at the corner.
He was wdower, and he used to come in OF
an evening for chat and cheap cigar.
Said he: "This lonely state is miserable
"Do you speak from experienced" asked
she.
"Yes; my Maria's been dead fourteen
years." said he.
81 shouldn't think it would take so long a
time for you men to forget anything" she
said.
"Ah ma Man is wonderful being
the most wonderful of Gods creatures"
- Except woman" said the widow.
"You are right, widow! And that's the
reason the Lord meant that every man should
have wife and every woman husband, just
to make them equal. So I think you and /
must have new partners"
"Now, look here, Mr. Johns! You've had
your partner, and I've had mine, and death
has dissolved the partnership. Now we are
both bankrupt, and we can't carry on a joint
business 80 we must 60 on pleasantly" she
said, and laughingly bade him "good.night ht!'
He had to laugh, too, because she seemed to
expect him to do nothing else.
Then there was the old bachelor over the
way who was learning the bassoon. He used
to come to his window Of summer evenings,
when the widow was standing at the door for
q breath of fresh air, and he would blow away
at "The Last Link is Broken!" till it was a
wonder he did not rupture something and die.
He did not smoke, nor drink, nor chew. But
a brilliant idea struck him one day, and over
he went.
"Do you keep paper collars, ma'am3" he
asked tremblingly.
"Yes, sir" she answered, smoothing her
apron down.
"Give me some," he said, vaguely.
"What size?"
"Oh any size!-I don't care"
She looked at him.
"Don't you know your number% she
asked.
"No, ma Fam! But don't care much"
"Lud!" she calculated. "Here, sir. just
you take your collar of, and let me measure
it."
So he did, and she handed him another.
"Thatll fit you, sir! ]" she said.
Then he tried tn mt il on and his hand
trembled so that be broke one of the button
holes.
"Now it's done, sir, said she.
"I'm afraid am" said be.
"Sr."
IL mean I'm afraid 1t is!'
Then he took up another, and, out Of COM
passion, she said:
Let me button it for you. All men are
death on button and button holes-I know
by poor Thorn"
Then she fitted on the collar, and the bach
elor was ecstatic. AS she handed him his
change, she said:
you're the gentleman that plays such
sweet, dreary tunes on the horns, aren't your
eyes, l play little. But its dreadful
lonely playing all by myself"
"Isn't there any one with you p she asked.
"No, I'm cursed-1'm bachelor y
"Deary me that is bad I'D ask you over
here to play, sir"
"Oh!" be interrupted.
"But I'm afraid the doctor next door would
come in and ask if anybody was hurt" she
continued.
"Oh !" he said again, in quite different
tona and left Five minutes after he was