The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1877-03-15

and hatchets and prepared to attack the
See Yups at night, but were prevented by
the officers of the prison, and thirty-one
coolies were locked up in punishment
cells, all having been found armed.
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
New York had $50 straight suicides
last year.
Death cannot be an evil, for it is uni.
versal. .-Schsller
TO do our best when we know it can
be only second best, is noble.
Hayes, it is said doesn't smoke. It
is understood that ex- President Grant does.
The man who melts over old maple
sugar and picks out the sticks is public
| benefactor.
Why is a beautiful woman like a
| printing press Because she makes good
impression.
VIXEN one is in a brown study, or day
dream, the Germans say, IAN angel is
flying over the house."
The Cincinnati Commercial has dis
covered that the Postmaster in politics
is an enormous nuisance"
-Life-insurance companies should be
allowed no rest until the sound ones stand
out like well-curb in frosty night
Detroit Free Press.
"A man can get $4,000 damages fer
the loss of leg, but the price of skeletons
in New York is reported to be down to
thirty five dollars.
In Ruthenia, says traveller, shoot
Ing star is looked upon as the track of an
angel flying to receive departing spirit,
or OF a righteous soul going up to heaven.
1t is well enough to remember that
one swallow doesn't make spring, but at
the same time there is no law to prevent
man from carting away his winter ash
pile.
The English marine has lost 1900
ships by disaster during the last year, and
Z -. : --is- - '=-a-.--a az c x,,ro
The sea is merely grave, covered " y
water.
Prisoners sentenced for life in the
New York courts are pardoned after an
average of seven years, while those
sentenced for ten years have to stay tn cir
time out. sR1 a7sS 3
Some people are SO wrapped up in
their own conceit that like clam, all
the world seems dark to them only when
they open their mouth Whitehall ~.
r. Times. @ :
"A Chicago woman who slipped into a
tub of water that her husband had thought
lessly left in the passage-way, confidingly
tells her neighbors that she never felt so
irrigated" in all her life. ...a-.---...--s,.-
"A New York doctor says that per.
son with q sore throat shouldn't kiss one
whose throat is all right, as the complaint
can be communicated. Girls with sore
throats should wear a bell. u
The Chicago Journal quietly observes:
"The little girls have commenced their
annual season of rope jumping, and the
prevailing style of coflins for children are
those covered with white satin" sA
March having come in like lion will
go out like mutton, or the signal service
will know the reason why. There isn't a
month in the year that isn't afraid of the
signal SERVICE .-St. LOUIS Republican.
"A Damariscotta Me.) boy sued his
father for assault and battery, because The
parent whipped him for playing hockey
The boy won his suit at least he got dam
ages. But they were made with skate
strap. EFT
--One Of our contemporaries, says the
Bridgeport Comm Standard, heads ah
articless' Who shall lead g' A very brief
examination of Hoyle win show that the
man next the dealer should do so.-Er-
change.
"A woman in Detroit tried to kill her
self, and the reason that she gave was that
she ''.got mad at the world'' because it
gave'her nothing to eat, instead of COM
planning that it didn't give her enough to
talk about. NE
Georgia merchants don't believe in
advertising. 1t pays them better to hang
out signs reading:
thomas JoNEs
HAs JUST rECEiyeD fINs LOT OF
gROCERieS At HOLEsALE,
Detroit Tribune.
The declaration of q farmer that he
could feed pig bucket of swill and then
put the pig into the bucket without half
filing it is substantiated A bale of cot
ton, which, when dry, weighed 400
pounds, was taken from a Red River
wreck the other day, and found to have
gained 430 pounds without bursting .
band. s.s q
An Old lady living in Stratford, Conn.,,
who had never been on the cars before,
recently rode by rail to New Haven. On
her return, being asked what she thought
Of it, she exclaimed It's the most
m-o-n.o-t- thing! Why, 1 believe
coming back they went through the iden-
tical places they did when they went
down. "a
The wife Of q sexton belonging to one
of the churches in very healthy locality
was recently interrupted in the middle OF
an fAranf11a r1non the harf1neaa of fha