The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1877-05-17
.,I.l94 " ~ HRg'

2i' IL mir fst -" - DeEo4jao. Z;
i, !. s1Y,10 VOL. .lii XII-:s:Nl0.9 Nl094H4 nd. !.
A wioman's Adventure With the Goat.
The Lodge of Freemasons iat Woods,
town, finding their Lodge-room growing
more and more dihgy and dusty; deJ
termined,that it should betsleanRd and
renovated as. far as soap and water could
ldo it. The job must, Of c9grse, be put
into feminine hands, aud it Was voted, to
employ'Mrs. H., the village chafwoman:'
sJThec door-keepery well aMarethat Mrs.
H., was one Of the independent inResti-
gators, who like to see and Judge for;
Themselves, went early The, next morning,
ibotrewed without leave aineighbor' billy
goat; andj notwithstanding some vigorous
protests ton tbepart9 of the animal, con-
lyeyed him up, stairs, placed him in. q
closet opening out Of the. Lodge.room,
and secured him by turning the button,
hut without; locking the door, put the
key in his pocket. Them with q face as
serious, as, if he had just heard, of the rob-
berry Of, the bank where his aunt, Of
whom he had great expectations, Kept
her trunk, he g.wended his way TO the
dwelling of Mrs. K, and requested herto
come ito the ,Lodge-rooms immediately
after, breakfast, that he; might give her
the necessary directions. = Rs 'on - -
IAN hour later the woman putin an ap-
pearance, EARNED and equipped with
broom, brushes, pal, tub, etc.c She found
the custodian Of the premises awaiting
her arrival. 20! : - ..'e a. So
Now ma'am,a said he3 e3spll'ten. you
what. we want done, !and,hdw;we came to
employ you. :. The, Brethren said, it, was
difficult to get anybody to, do the job and
mot NEEDLE with The secrets in that little
closet; -weihave lost the key and SO CAM
not lock, the door. lnBut Iilassured lthem
that you could be depended on,pp It "a
Depended on? T. guess I can, My
poor, dear, dead and gone husband be-
loHged to- the nFfeemasons; '6r Anti
Masons, L don't know which. He letme
Into, all the secrets Of the concern, and
| showed me all the marks the, ;gridiron
made when he joined, and told me how
they fixedIp6or' Morgan 4 and, sure as !
live, + never mentioned Iword aboutait
to a single soul to this. day. 5If.nobodY
troubles your closet to find out your
secrets till 7 do, they'l1lay there and fot
they will" i!fi $500 i2i % io': q. t5oS :
\ sI"Yes, L thought weicouldn't d0ibetter
than give you the job. Now want You
ito commence in that corner, and give the
whole room 4. thorough cleaning, and Te.
member I Have pledged 99my w0rridi4 rii4 aid
honor for your. fidelity: Do1a't Ego isato
that closet" With this, parting Injunction
emphatically uttered, he. .lef Mrs: &, ito
her task. :: The village Of odstoWn WAS
small, and centered about ths post ofies,
store and Westinghouse, Mrs: r. did
not see that the sober-faced door-keeper
Just stepped into the post-of6ce on the
first floor of the same huildingsaand
AWAITED the. result. !, She. only Listened
till she was sure he had descended the
last stair, then turned to gaze at the pro.
hibited door,. 2.ii ,iop s,r Tc.t Z7ss'i
"Don't go into that closetp' she,re,
peated. in stage whisper s. ,si'I'll warrant
there is a ogridiron there, or some non5
sense Just like the Anti -Masons.v I will
just take one peep; who'll be the wiser :
I can keep 8 secret. Besides, that closet
III be on my, mind till I see. what's in A.
and, T never; could work worth; 81 cent
when there's anything on ny mind lli s bg
(! StealthilY on tip-toe, she, approached
the closet, turned the button, the dQpr
swung open, and--bah ,BillYy, aroused ,sgdl
from bis nap, BY the sudden Hood flight
making spring to regain his Liberty,
almost upset her ladyship. Both started
for the door, which, alas ! was barricaded
with house cleaning paraphernaliag The
momentum of thei charging partyiwas not
TO- be retarded by. such slight obstacles
and all went down the stairs stat in isa one e
ayaIancfie,yoS r iffsa9'2 ''ss>i'' - ''N'.u' =
\ The crash: brorghtto the spot half the
people ofthe village,aheaded by the sads
eyed door-keeper.s He released the goat
first, cripple for life; then he assisted lst 4!
thea charwonIan to arise from uhder a
pile.of tubs, pals; brooms,; brushes, ete.
No bones we're broken; and strangely
enough, she was but slightly bruised eex;
ternally; her injuries KeTe l nearily iS ~ N
ternai, her feelings were gerrfDly lace ?,
rated..'n .@'s:jii2 - = 'afa'i.isf l-2' Ssi =
"Have yous been taking degrees,
ma'am ?" inquired the sympathetic Gus.
todian of Freemasons' secrets. ,.,,y
"Taking degrees Z! IF you call tumbling
from the Top to tae oottoma ?I Iae s!aiIs,
with the devil after a1 ye, tskkaeg things gy q
degrees. nave; ana I ys tI;ga'sa hgm Fanf fS.fs
as ys nave me, ana auls easm = Do1s, ~
III warrant theyll MAKE as mufe'lnl m!uf'l 4olse ys
as have" ,,,,,, ~, .s..l,. !a,s: ..I,;.... .
There hadn't been a. e more. more EraitlhIy y1railI
woman in WoodstoWl, ,!59l tor many % Gay,
II hope you dld not open the closet sci
said the e'imperturbaoie, ,door.keePe
,"Open the!elosst : Eve ate -tne appie
when she was Told not TO. 3ifYoa want 1 q .
woman to do anything, ,tell her not g. 9.
and she'll do it certain! 0psp3 3ths as esosss 3.