Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1877-03-14
''Di. Nero" on "Sweet By-and-
HV.

L nave seen an alligator sWAllOV
two fishing poles and an old boot
leg, and then stretch himself out oil
a sunny log and wait week for
good square case of dyspepsia t
come along,
And it never came.
Still there was always about tive
feet of gushing serenity towering
about the countenance of that ALI
gator.
l don't think, though, that ever
an alligator could pass through
what | have in the last two months
without wishing he had been born
a crowbar.
Two months ago, | came to Phil
adelphia in good circumstances,
comparatively, and with nothing in
the world the matter with me, ex-
cept two bunions.
| also had wife and seven little
"Meros," one of them qnite new, in
fact, the latest edition.
The little "Mero" trade has al
ways been just about brisk enough
with us TO make me have a fellow
feeling for Old clothes.
1t costs something to keep 'em
in good spirits, too, for those little
humanities have oPpetitcs that will
lay perpetual motion clean in the
shade.
Since my first acquaintance with
matrimony, there have been such
frequent and varied additions to
our family, that | always feel dis
appointed whenever | so home
after a long trip and fail to find a
fresh one on hand.
They come so frequently that
the newspapers always chronicle
their advent, just as they do the
arrival of the new magazines, and
speak of them in this wise:
"The little Nero for October IS
out. He is made up Of varied and
interesting matter, and presents
the usual appearance of freshness
and originality"
Or, perhaps, something like this:
"Always whooping and kicking,
the little Nero for June comes
this month like bowling hyena,
and makes us wish we owned a
hospital.
at is brimfull of noise and red
ness, and the typographical get
up is even more ragged than the
asst one, although its head presents
clean proof SO far as hair is con-
,erned."
There's one consolation about
EN-. Not a single one is bow
egged, and only one has eyes cut
,iassed, and he takes after his
neither.
We brought only the June num-
Ell with us, but thought we'd have
D charter the train to do that, be-
ore we got him here.
However, | should have been
content to 50 on experimenting in
growing families, but for a song
hat has Travelled around in my
footsteps ever since / came, like a
crippled book agent.
1t is called Sweet By-and-By."
Perhaps you have heard it!
If not, and you learn that it is
coming your way, enter the near est
leaf and dumb college and stay
here until after the epidsnic.
"Sweet By-and-By"--tbose four
title words don't look very form
nable, and yet they can stir up
more racket than anything, except
red-headed girl, when she is CON-
PEELED to stand in a crowded street
ear.
We arrived here on the 4th of
July. The bands were playing
Sweet By-and-By )" soldiers were
marching, with drums beating and |
flags flying and bayonets flashing ; |
the people were all yelling like
wild Indians, and eating free
lunches whenever they got a chance;
everything was chuck full of pa
triotism Mrs. "Mero," was hop
ping up aud down like an India
suspender, and / felt so
good that l ordered lager beer for
the whole family on the spot.
Alters while we thought change
Of programme would be healthy,
but it wasn't to be had.
Sweet By-and-By" was what
the people wanted, and "Sweet By
and-By" they were going to have.
That night ] went to bed early
and tried to sleep, but, though
there were worlds of rest ringing
bron0b tba a;r onfe;da - mae