Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1877-01-26
NO. 500.
GleAnings.

change his name again II he chooses, and
only wants to be asked.
1t is said that when female child is
born in Indiana, the unhappy father be
gins to save money to buy piano.
Johnny, what are you doing. my sony"
"Oh! nothing, only trying to hit Frank
on the fingers with the hatchet"
Red used On railroad signifies danger
1t should be SO construed when displayed
on mans nose.
They have discovered Michael Angeles
private correspondence; and it's a good
thing for poor Mike that he never was In
Broof lyn.
Your son died rather suddenly yester-
day, of throat disease" is what an Idaho
sheriff wrote to a fond mother in Indiana
the other day.
| The talk about Schenck's book has Civ
en- new impulse TO what Watterson
calls " the aristocratic game of America"
The boys are all chipping out.
| Here q woman got to be President after
| all-and an unmarried woman at that
Mrs. Sudlow, just elected President Of
the Iowa Teachers Association.
| The little state of Delaware has ADOPT.
new flag 9x6l feet of blue silk with Il
yellow fringe 1t will be used to spread
over the State to keep the frost eff
| A woman in Dawson, Ga, accidentally
bit her tongue off the other day, and
since that, her husband gets home every
evening two hours earlier than usual.
why did you pass Yesterday without
looking at me?" sid Il beautiful woman
to Taleyrand. Because, madam, If
had looked could not have PASSED
A Pennsylvania boasts that he makes
a soap that would wash politicians
character white as snow" there must be
great deal of ''lye" about that soap.
A gentleman offered guest a tiny
glass Of whiskey, saying: Drink that;
it won't hurt you" IN be bound i.
wouldn't" replied the guest, 'even if i,
was vitriol"
Mrs. Nilsson has been ordered by her
physician to u warmer climate; but Mr.
Nilsson says that if there is a warmer eli
mate than the one he has lived in tor the
past few months back he isn't aware of it
Nellles Sartoris has joined the Wash.
ington Gymnasium, 1t is not the pun
for we have used that before-but it is
our anxiety for dear, darling Nellie, which
irresistibly impels US to remark that these
gymnastics are Sartorisky.
why is it." asks an exchange, "that
nearly every Senator's wife in Washing
ton is Il handsome waman?" 1t is simply
bee; use, nearly every Senator's wife who
is not a handsome woman is left at home
1t WAS probably an attack of the green
eyed monster, that induced the Chicago
htef-0cedn to say that ION the night
that Victoria Woodruff lectured and the
can can appeared, the Common Council
of Jackson, Mich, failed to have q quor.
um."
The New York Con,mercil .Ad,er';.sr
notes the fact that Il Mrs. Sine, of New
Jersey, is living with her fourth husband,
and says that "the other three must have
gone off on tangent That may &C.
count for the frs, and third, but not for
the second
Several passengers On the lower Miss.
issirpi were attracted by the alligators
basking in the sunshine. Are they am
phlbious Captans" asked lookcr-on.
"Amphibious, thunder" answered the en-
thuslastic officer, they'll eat a hog
minute"
A Boston dramatic critic says Of Gift
ed actress: "She wore handsome
dress, and thereby hung trail,. Her
] cnl,ftle Aay;h1a ~, o.
of IA mornings mist. and yet thoroughly
proportiuned to the curves of the charac-
ter, are most especially noticeable.
A policeman met negro at night car.
rying trunk along the street, and col
Jared him. The negro explained: "De
family what was boarding me has been
axing for money, and as dey was
gone out tonight thought l would get
into some family .whar dey respected de
panic
Ned Eose used to travel around Col
orado with performing bear, but q
: great change came one day last week, and
now the bear travels around alone, think
ing over old times, and occasionally
leaning up against tree AS \ pang shoets
through his bowels. Ned is inside that
bear"
Yes, sir" yelled preacher in Dako-
tn church, one Sunday morning, there's
more lying, and swearing, and stealing,
and general deviltry to the square inch
in this here town than all the rest of the
American country" and then the congre-
CATION got up and dumped the preacher
out OF the window.
4 Minnesota Judge, in pronounciug
the death sentence, tenderly observed:
If guilty you richly deserve the fate that
awaits you, If innocent, it will be d gratir
tication for you to feel that you were
hanged without such a crime on yopi
conscience; in either case you will 1e de.
liv.red from world of care"
No! no. no, A thousand times, no
1t must not be done. A Swede out In
Solauo county, Cal, has applied to the
courts for PERMISSION to change his name
from Peter Azel Nystrom to John Smith
as if there were not already John Smithl
, enough TO craze any one who consults {
directory to find n particular John Smith
When girl crops her front nair, ant
pulls it down over her forehead like
: Mexican mustang, and then ties q piec.
of red velvet around her neck, who car
wonder at the number of pale-faceC
young men that throw away their ambl
ton, and pass sleepless nights in tryin!
to raise down on their upper lipss
Herbert" said perplexed mother
''why is it that you're not better boy!'
"Well,' said the little fellow, soberly
looking up into her face with his homes
blue eyes, Il. suppose the real reason !.
that don't want to ben We think th,
, child gave the real reason why all of US
, big rs we'll rs little, are not better tha.
We are.
The charge that Botkin, Of the MI
waukec Sentinel, has to pull on his ur
dershirt from the elbow on account O
the size OF his ears, is base invention
We've known Bot. over twenty one years
have slept with him great many times
and we know that his ears are flexible
In cold weather we used to use the of
one for an extra quilt. -Ctncianats Tvmes
A pretty good story is told Of one o.
Governor Tilden's staff. 1t is said tha
when the individual referred to, first pre
sented himself en- mititdre to his wifi
and little daughter, the latter, after gaz
. ing at him in wonder for a few m;nntaa