The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1877-08-28
THE SPIRIT Of DEMOCRACY.
Tuesday, August 2s. 1877.
Sepse and Mupse,tse.


Because they look peakish.
Why are umbrellas like pancakes p
Because they are seldom se,n after Lent.
"Can he, ought to I've, aud will be exc
cuted. ~ ohu Sherman On Resumption
Act.
Good judges estimate the wheat crop
OF Ohio this year al thirty million BUSH
els.
The farmers of North Carolina say
there ia more wheat this year than for
forty years.
Way /, man who doesn't lose his
temper like schoolmaster2 Because
he keeps cool (keeps school
Why can not two slender persons ev.
er become great friends7 Because they
viii always be slight acquaiutances.
The difference between sailor and an
adalterator Of tea is, that one Is toiler
OF the sea, and tue other soiler Of the
tea.
A. H. Stephens conducted case in
Georgia County Court the other day for
an aged negro--an old friend Of his
boyhood.
Dio Lewis is camping out in Califor.
mia, building up with pie and sponge
cake the constitution be shattered with
oatmeal and beans.
Why Is q drunkard hesitating to sign
the pledge like a skeptical Hindoo? Be.
cause he doubts whether to give up the
worship Of jug or not.
Instead OF eighty thousand tons Of
wheat, calculated upon by California,
she will now raise over two hundred and
fifty thousand tons this year.
at is not loud praying" says an Ar.
kansas circuit rider, "which counts with
the Lord, so much as giving four full
quarts TO the gallon"
That Utica child who swallowed q
shawl pin last spring is now all right,
and is hungering for bunch OF hair.
pins and tooth brush.
An eminent French physician says the
apple is Fan admirable prophylactic and
tonic" 1t raised thunder, though, with
the fret man and woman who tried it
Boston Post
II you 20 on an excursion and the
seats are all taken, stand up as long as
you can and then cry out. "Man over
boardm Every woman will rush for
the rail.-Free Press
A young man from the West, visiting
Boston. earelessly remarked that be
didn't admire Emerson He was imme.
diately arrested and fined 85 for pro
fanity.-& Louis Times.
According to the Egyptian doctrine
mans soul was to pass through the
bodies of different animals, at the end
Of three thousand years to return and
inhabit the human form.
In 1866 the Buccaneers began their
depreciation on the Spanish colonies :
California was discovered by Cortez in
1887. The first settlement made by the
English, was at jamestown in 1907.
Madame" said certain nameless
one to Mrs. Brown, the other day, ''you
are talking simple rubbish" "Yes, sir"
replied the ever-crushing lady, "because
/ wish you to comprehend me-"
HE is man after my own heart, pa, |"
said Julia, reverting to Charles Angus
tus. Nonsense" replied old practical
HE Is man after the money your un
Gle left you" And then all was quiet.
Felix McCarty of the Kerry militia
was generally late on parade. "Ah,
Felix" said the Sergeant, "you are al
ways late" BE aisy. Sergeant Sulli-
van" was the reply, 'sure some one
must be last"
William the Conqueror was a son of
the famous Duke Rollo. He introduced
the custom of ringing the curfew bell in
the evening, rs signal that the lamps
should be extinguished. His death took
place in 1857.
Elephants, in some instances, have
.beenskept in captivity upward Of one
hundred and thirty years. The longev
ity,of some birds Is great swans live to
the age Of one hundred years; the eagle
has survived century.
. The most elevated bridge in the world
is the Verrugas yiaduct, on the Lima
ana Oroya railway. in tho Andes Of
Peru. 1t is12, 900 feet above the level
of the sea, 575 feet long, and formed OF
three iron truss spans OF iron piers.
Take away your Spartan boy and his
fox. The lad who puts lighted cigar
in his pocket when he meets his father,
and tells what the Sunday School teach
er said while the cigar is burning him,
is infinitely more worthy of admiration
A Scotch witness, somewhat given to
preyarication, was severely handled by
cross-examining counsel "How far
is it between the two farms2'' said the
counsel. "By the road it's twa mile
'Yes; but, on your oath, how far Is it
as the crow flies p ~ dinna ken; ]
never was . crow"
Joseph Montgolser invented the bal
loon. The first one constructed by him
had capacity Of about forty-ive Gu.
bic feet; burning some paper under it,
it quickly rose TO height of seventy
five feet, remaining in its position until
cooled by the air. He afterward repea.
ted his experiment before the Royal
Academy Of Sciences, in Paris.
off you are stung by wasp while
picuieking," says floating item, "apply
the end Of cigar which has been
chewed for q few moments to the
wound" Young ladies should remem
Der this, and always chew the end of a
cigar few moments and place the
'.weed" in their pockets before starting
on a picnic. The chewing process will
make them so sick that they will not
want to 60 to the picnic, and thus they
will escape being stung by wasp.
Agentleman had been bothered 80
constantly with tramps and their entreat.
les for something to eat that he instruct
I'd the cook to tell them she had moth
ing Tie other day one of them drop.
ped in and made the usual plea and in.
aniry. The cook responded promptly,
I'VE have nothing at ALL" The tramp
Than oo0rtaonelx, a astad s.uayo yor nm