The Princeton union., 1877-10-17
Test Of Anectlon.
Max Adeler in Philadelphi. Bulletin

Test of Affection.
Max Adeler in Philadelphia Bulletin.
Mr.. Thorpe is a middle-agcd widower,
and some time ago he paid his addresses
to Mrs. Bolts, widow on the shady side
of forty. Thorpeis rich, and after the,
widow accepted him he began to fear that
maybe she had taken him for his money.
and SO he concluded to test her to ascer-
tain if she really loved himself alone.
So one evening when they were sitting
together in thoparlor, hesaid tOher Ayig
Hannah, I've somethings important to
tell You, But I am going to do It because
I consider it right that you should know
it. Hannah, what would you say if in
formed you that one of my knee pans is
gone, and that have patent hinge Oh
that leg?"
81 should say that I care nothing for
that, my dear have only one toe on my
left foot The others were frostbitten> off,
and the ankle is all twisted around
crooked" 49,.
1 "You don't tell mel" said Thorpe.
"Well, but I've something worse than
that. might as we'll confess now that
bald place on top Of my head is not
really my scalp; I've been trepanned. I
have a silver-plated concern set into
my skull, a kind of 4skylight.s You can
lift it up and see down On the inside of
me-" .-
I'm glad you mentioned it, DEAR"
said the widow, "for it gives me courage
to tell you thatI haven't hair of nv. own
on my head. I'm as bald as chandelier
s'SGsa is thas.s8a eraciodas 1 pever ( should
have expected it. But you willsbe sur
priscd to learn that none Of my teeth
are natural. All false, and besides that
I have to wear an India7rubber :thingam-
aggig on my palate to keep it from drop
ping down." nY~sL,E#
T aTml very sorry for you, John, but its
some comfort that all my teeth are false.
too, and that lam perfectly blind in my
right eye. 1tlooks like a good eye, but
it absolutely amt worth cent"
| I"Great heavens! Why didn't you tell
| me Of this before?"' exclaimed Thorpe.
'FBut while we are on the subject, 1 will
| say further that 1 have chronic torpidity
Of the liver. How does that strike you?''
| "Oh, I don't mind it," said Mrs. Bolts,
"because I've been bilious and dyspeptic
for twenty years, and besides, I am one
rib short. It was broken in railroad
accident, and the doctor had to cut it out.
I'm subject to fits too" M
| This, is horrible, . said Thorpe. "Mrs.
Bolts, I think you ought to@have mention
ed these things to me when Proposed to
you. I imagined that I was addressing a
woman, complete human creature. But
what are you, Mrs. Bolts? Mrs. Bolts, you
appear to me to be a ,dilapidated old
wreck, with not more than half of the
usual machinery about you. It's won.
der to me you don't fall to pieces"
II am no worse than you are: You
said yourself that you had a trap door in
the top of your head, and a gum elastic
/ palate" a.~.. .. -.
I eyes; but these things amt true" sai6
I Thorpe. II only told you about them tt
see if you really loved me. ~ mas sounc
asa dollar; no inactive liver, Or silver:
plated skull, or anything, But you seen
to be kind of strung together, SOS if yo1
should knock against anything you'c
scatter around over the carpet. I thinl
you ought to let me off, s,
.Very well, sir, SOL will But let M
tell you that I've got nothing the matte
with me, either. only invented those
4 stories to try you, because l, knew yor
were playing a game over me. Now
know you don't love me. You can GO
sir" - ~ - -
''Hannah, I take it allback: do lovt
you, "a e SN 81
i "Do!yon eally2EThen' I love you NOR,
than----y g3 3 [
), But'no ;fhe curtain had better be draw
right here. The cold and selfish worl,
u has no business with such scenes as this
!, They are to be consolidated early mex
month"; a.r& a.. nm st.,s,gKsg as@,. !,