Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1877-09-29
HISTORY OF THOMAS CAT.

Three horsemen went to return no more.
-From TIE Gerwax of Lsd1ig Uhiand.
HISTORY OF THOMAS CAT.
The Days q His Infancy-Hls Record
as q Musician and DistuFbeF % Re.
psse.
have taken the precaution TO clOth<
myself In coat of male before attacking
the subject. The Tom cat being encased
In coat of male, too. wish to be on as
near an equal footing with him as posi-.
BILE, but still he now beats me by two
feet. II Is hard to get the advantage of 9
cat Anybody who can get the advant
age of a cat does not need guardian he
can just 60 righr out into the cold world
and earn dollar day the year round.
The cat was invented hong time ago.
have forgotten the name of the inven-
tor. 1t was patented, and for long
time the inventor help 1t as monopoly,
but after n time the patent run out. and
che cat came into general use, since
which time there have. been some i'm
prOvements added. SO that the cat of this
age Is hard thing to beat.
Cats are of couple OF kinds. One Is
the Tom cat, and the Other-welA the
other isn't. A cat Is all born at once.
with the exception of the eyes, which are
always nine flaws late. When car COM
mences it Is called kitten. and there are
usually a considerable many brothers aud
sisters of him at once. AMI for nine days
they are obliged TO 60 1t blind. The eye
business sticks me. have read up all
the work of optics. aud notice that most
everything that Is going to have eyes
have them built In under the original
contract. even TO the potato. and why the
cat Ia left out | cslns0t discover any
more than can why woman looks I'M
der the bed In find a man.
The cat Is composed Of = peculiar com.
position. similar TO India rubber che ex.
act combination of the material IL one OF
the lost arts. l dropped q cat out OF q
five story window on Broadway once,
and be bOupced up about n rod and land
ed ON his feet. He didn't even feel to
see Ii any bones were broken he simply
glanced at the lamp post OH the cOrner,
and real the name Of the STREET.-THE get
his bearings. and then sailed away as
peaceiulIy as though he had just got out
OF stage. It l. wonderful how far "a cat
will tumble and not break.
Cats have tail built into them ON the
after end. La repOse it is about the size
of a broOW handle, but when excited the
owner has thu power IF bluwing It up
about the size OF a Bologna sausage. and
when erect in the air 1t gives the cat n
very gsmey appearance. The principal
uses of the tail To the domestic cat are
few. Their memories are poor, and they
forget and leave their tails round Oh the
floor for people 10 step on. One of the
chief delights a cat experiences Is Ina get
ting It's tail under the rocker OF q chair
Just Ia SESSION TO catch the whole weight
of the chair dt the come down.
TO get the pure, unadulterated cat one
needs To go to the city and make the ac-
quaiItauce of the Tom cat. There is
more life to the square inch in city
Tom cat than can be found anywhere
else. barring piece of CHEESE. There he
flOurishes In all his native vigOr. There
his cat-like qualities find full. play.
Then he courts.
Then he fghs,
Then lac yells,
On moonlight nigh 9.
Climbing fences, lodging boots,
Also bu let's. rs he ssoOts
From the CHIMNEY 20 the gutter.
Down conductor to the shutter,
Into the garden plat.
That
Cat!
The Tom cat and the street lamp at.
tent TO business chiefly at night. Day.
time thew are more ornamental than ase-
full. Sprawlin2 around the stove, bask-
ing In the sun, he passes away the day In
sleep. As night approaches ne bra, Is
no. and starts out TO attend to business.
He has no friends. Every cat he meets
is an enemy. He meets the enemy and
they ale his, or he Is theirs; 1t is as often
one way as the other. AS soon as he
sees the foe he arches his back. initiates
his tail and sounds tho war cry. Talk
about the tOcsin alarm; the Tom cat calls
in voice that Immediately gives him
the belt for hidcous noises. The enemy
near each other; there is not clash OF
arms exactly, but there is an interlOcking
and braiding Of legs, two Jumps Of ami
mated hair 60 into the air and come
down on to the ground and roll over, and
claw. and scratch, and fur flies, and it
flies fur, and they scratch faces, and they
face scratches, and they yOwl, and howl,
and bite and tear tor few moments, and
then unbraid their legs and sit and look
at each other for minute, and collect
their scattered senses, and try and dis
cover what particular portion of their
anatomy is missing, and then both at the
same instant turn and annihilate space
In opposite directions, with q unanimity
Of thought that iss:w0nderful In dumb
animal. This is not an Illuminated pic
cure. but Is q hunk Of truth about cat.
dQhG
The Tom cat ranges with undisputed
sway ON fences, pOrches ana nousetops.
A man, to fully realize the charm OF Q
country home and steep r0oe, needs 70
pass night under tin roof and have
an assortment of cats hold levee above
his head. As he listens to the music In
the hair" and leaps from bed as CAT
springs from q chimney-pOt and iands on
the roof above his head, and then engages
in Greco Roman struggle, while the
man throws up the window and yeIls and
swears and throws boot-jacks and black
lng-brnshes i'm the direction OF the noise,
it is then that the city loses its charm,
and dollars don't look bigger than ten
pieces 70 him. and he wishes himself
back in his country home, where milk Is
out five cents q quart and eggs grow
thirteen to the dozen.
L know what am saying. passed a
night once away from home What !
learned that night would fill very large
barrel l had retired, and was endeavor.
Ing to tangle myself up In sleep, when a
most Undesirable bOquet of sounds stole
into my room and entwined itself about
my ears. 1t was the first strains Of q
cat-hght got out Of bed and opened
my mouth and dropped 'scatr" out o
the window. The yowling increased,
added pair of 80 boots to The affair