Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1877-06-27
PITH AND POINT.

0dSlllo Cdule along duu u1Vlu0u ulll lllVo
sixteen pieces and bunch of bones.
HE Russian soldiers while on the
march do their cooking for meals, we
suppose, on some of those mountain
ranges.-Philadelphia Bulletin.
ONE Boston family has changed cooks
fourteen times in three months, and an
other family in the same city has had
but one cook in 81 years.
A RICH man died in Baltimore lately.
Half of his property was left to charity,
and the other half to conjecture Gin
ci,uaati Saturday Night.
A MICHIGAN Indian observes: "Big
crop cranberries-big whisky; small crop
cranberries-one glass pop and no boots
next winter"
In one Of the daily papers recently we
found the following advertisement: Z
WANTED, boy to sand-paper." Now,
why did that man yearn for chance to
sand-pap boy.-Ea.
IT was an old, but very good thing
said by a French paragrapher lately, to
the effect that he hates a girl when she
Is trying to be woman, and woman
when she is trying to be girl.
RIvERToN, New jersey, has a sensa-
ton in the birth of four-legged chick
en-. Scientists are going down there to
see it it isn't a new style Of mosquito"
-New York Telegram.
WHILE we are erecting monuments to
the memory of our dead heroes, the man
who will invent a new staHd-up collar
with windows in 'em, can arrange
for monument by calling upon us after
we have been out on collecting tour
Whitehall TSn1es
"AH, Lowell" she murmured as thew
wandered through the moonlight, " all!
dearest, why do the summer roses fade?"
He happened to be young chemist of a
practical turn of mind, and he replied
that it was owing to the insufficiency of
oxygen in the atmosphere.
A CITIZEN of Chelsea died recently of
brain disease, caused by his efforts to pay
all his debts. He succeeded, but he i'm
medlately after became insane. Insanity
and death from such cause are as rare
these times, as failure to pay dollar for
dollar, when it is awkward so to do, is
common.-Boston Globe
THIS plan of making it rain Just when
one pleases is well enough, perhaps, as
the scientists figure it out, but how will
they manage when a man wants to wet
down his corn field the same afternoon
the church society hold their annual
picnic ?-Bridgeport Standard.
A YOUNG man attempted to frighten
some of his lady friends in Homer, La,
few nights since, by suddenly appear
ing in ghostly guise, but one of them
flrnH ri of l. IL L,
self known with alacrity.
LADY: "The kale was not done
enough yesterday" Cook: II know
you said 50, but there were four wit
nesses against yer; for my mother and
sister were here to dinner, and there's
Lizer and me-and twas done beauti-
ful.-Punch
81 tell you, sir" said DR.. - one
morning, to the village apothecary, "I
tell you, sir, the coz oopuh should not
must not, be disregarded" 'What,
Doctor" exclaimed the apothecary, rub
bling his hands, "you don't say that's
broken out in town, too, has it?" Lord
help us! What unhealthy times these
are!"
THERE was quite a company of fash
ionable guests sitting round the table
after dinner, and happened to disagree
as to the date OF a certain even of which
they had been talking, when the hosts
eight year old'un attempted to expedite
the solution Of it by suddenly asking
Why, mamma, what day was it you
washed me?'
A CONNECTICUT dentist has got hold
of a composition whereby he can make
teeth at cost Of less than 50 cents a set.
This will enable the female wearer of
false teeth to have set to match every
suit she owns, both in color and design.
With pink goods, pink teeth; with
stripped goods, striped teeth, and SC on.
The man who discovered Connecticut
was no SLOUGH.
"WELL, john" said a minister to one
of his hearers q hope you hold family
worship regularity" "Aye, sir,''
answered John, 4" in the time O year o't."
!" In the time O year OF! What do We
mean!" "Ye ken sir, we Gamma see in
winter" "But, John, you should buy
candles" 'EAye, sir" replied John,
but, in that case, I'm afraid the cost
might overhang the profit
"WHo is that man." asked the Gar
Of his aid, the other day, pointing to a
chap with chunk of bareback in one
hand and notebook in the other, who
was hanging around headquarters, eye
ing him rather closely "That," said
the aid" that's an American newspa-
per correspondent from Chicago" :
Shoot him at sunset" replied his
Imperial Majesty, retiring within his
tent.-N. Y. Commercial Advertiser
A NEGRO preacher had elaborated a
new theory of Exodus, to wit. The Red
Sea got frozen over and so afforded the
Israelites a safe passage, but when
Pharaoh with heavy iron charities at
tempted it, they broke in and were
drowned. A brother rose and asked for
an explanation. ''Pse been studying
geography, and the geography says dat be
very warm country-where dey have de
very tropics. And de tropics too hot for
freezing. De pint to be 'splained is,
bout breaking through de Ice" The
preacher Strengthened up and said: