Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1877-04-11
OFFICIAL PAPER OF LYON COUNTY.
TERMS:
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

What every man in town wants
so.
The population of Texas is $780,
900.
Farmers get healthy who wear blue
glass ploughs.
Law suits are now cut goring and
deep in the biadere.
1t is not good for man to be alone.
He should buy dog.
Stanley Mathews and Henry Wat
terson married sisters.
Ruskin is in Venice, and the ma
tives gondole with him.
There is neither a Speaker nor a
Vice President pro tenn.
Flies may be easily caught by old
maids on blue glass windows.
Silver bricks and babies are the
manufactures of Austin, Nevada.
Postmaster General Key has thir-
teen chlldren--s whole bunch of lit
tie Keys.
Joe Coburn feels repentant aud
thinks he might rather have gone to
Congress.
Why is the Czarina Catharine like
q bald-headed personi Because her
heir is Orloff.
An exchange says to sober q
drunken man, pour water "down the
spine of his back"
When Mr.. Sword took the wit
ness stand, the lawyer at once pro-
cecded to draw him out.
A tattler imparts his secrets tn
two kinds of people-those who ask
him and those who don't.
"No woman is pleased" asserts Oc.
tave Feuillet, Sat being told by man
that he loves her like sister"
Phoebe Cozzeps wants the st. Louis
postofhce, but Hayes. remembering
Grant, says "No cousins need apply"
Mexico is famishing fol revolu-
ton and the efforts of every patriot
are directed toward that desirable
end.
A mothers pretty saying: (Which
Of your two children do you love the
most2" "Always the one that is alb
sent"
II is folly to pay forty cents for a
sheet of music, when you can go to
church and get it by the choir for
nothing.
The Madison Patriot has suspended
publication for few weeks. 1t says |:
at will be a relief to both our sub
scribers."
An English lady has created scan
dal by marrying groom. He was
not regular bridegroom, but Of the
stable sort.
"Shall I mix it in a blue glassl'
asked the man with the big diamond.
AUST azure inclined" replied the
thirsty one. ....
Twelve railroads are to be sold un-
der the hammer within two months.
The holders of the stock OF these
roads have already been sold.
Coal costs $14 a ton IN Texas, and
the economical Texan finds it great
deal cheaper to warm the house with
little whiskey and an occasional
fight.
Olive Logan says she'd like to be
an Englishman's wife and have him
ask her to bring his bootsl She'd
make him think tornado had struck
the house.
"Grandma, why don't you keep a
servant any longcrp "Well, you
see, my child, I am getting old now,
and can't take care of one as I used
TO, you know"
The following epitaph is from a
tombstone In Indiana:
Under This sod our Babie Lies,
it neither Cries nor HolErs
1T LIVED just twenty I Days,
And cost us 90.
Liberal theology will have to take
a step backward The story of the
poor fellow who was killed by being
,drenched with petroleum and then
,sct on fire shows than fiends still
walk the earth and the devil is Meth.
or dead nor asleep.
A new feature has been Introduced
into some of the country schools
When one of the girls misses word
the boy who spells 1t gets a kiss from
her. Some girls are last forgetting
all they ever knew about spelling
while the boys are improving with
klne1Ampled rapiditY. a a...n