Middletown transcript., 1877-04-14

:
began: II was born in the year
in the County Of, Ireland J" anC
Abernethy burst into laugh, and en-
tered properly into bis case. A lady
determined to be brief. and to humol
the tyrant, one day entered his con
sulting-room, and thrusting out an in
jured hand, merely said my thumb
sir" tYou, madam" be exclaimed il
admiration, "are the only sensible wo'
man I ever had for patient"
A gentleman, equally determined
being roughly interrupted, suddenly
locked the door, put the key in hi;
pocket, and insisted on being heard
Abernethy smiled, and complimented
the patient on his resolution. To q
gentleman, who gave him twenty
pounds to re-attend his wife, he said
''Are you the fool who gave me twenty
pounds the other day? Go home, and
tell your wife to dine earlier, and eat
less and do you keep your money in
your pocket, for no doctors advice is
worth twenty pounds" To lady, be
said severely: go home and tell your
husband he will not have wife this
day six months"
Abernethy was no respecter Of per-
sons Poor or rich, his patients had to
submissively take their turns, or they
might 60 elsewhere. An angry noble
man once broke into his room, and
stated his rank and titles in full, and
asked Abernethy if he knew who he
was. To this Abernethy replied 80
"Aud /, sir, am John Abernethy, Sur
geon-Lecturer of St. Bartholomew's
Hospital, &c. and if you wish to con-
suit me, l am now ready to hear what
you have to say, in return, sir" The
Duke Of Wellington, angry at having
to wait his turn, abruptly entered his
room. Abernethy asked him how he
had entered, "By the door, sir. -
Then" said the irascible DOCTOR" |
recommend you to make your exit the
same way He is also said to have
refused to attend George ", till his
lecture at the hospital was over. The
point on which Abcrnethy most insisted
was the stomach, and through that i'm
portant organ he declared all diseases
could be cured. The celebrated bis
cults which be used to eat, and rscom-
mended, were not so called from him,
but from the baker who first invented
them That there was kindness in
Abernethy, who can deny. who remem-
bers the story Of how he returned all
his fees to a poor widow who had con-
suited him, and added fifty pounds, to
enable her to give her sick child daily
ride He had horror of operations,
and rejoieed when the evil could be
averted without such rough and terrible
remedies.
We must not forget to enroll among
our doctors the poet-doctor. Akenside,
who, at the age Of twenty-three, wrote
the pleasures of the Imagination" a
poem which Pope admired and eulo-
gized Akenside is described by one
of his best biographers as a bundle
Of contradictions, "By turns be was
placid, irritable-simple, Affected
gracious, haughty-mean, benevolent
kind and brutal" He is described
as thin, pale, and lame. He was rough
to women, and sometimes paced
the hospital preceded by porters with
brooms, to drive back the crowd. The
poets classical tastes we're ridiculed by
Smollett in "Peregrine Pickle ;" nor
can we wonder at Smollett's ridicule
when we read the stories of Akenside's
sourness and arrogance If he bullied
bis poorer patients, as we are told he
did. we can only rejoice at the mortii-
cation he must nave felt when one of
the governors of St Thomas plainly
told him: "Know thou art a servant Of
this charity"
Among eccentric physicians we can
not select better instance than Gar
rick's enemy, the facetious DR.. Monsey |
A poor doctor at Bury St. Edmunds,
he obtained a patron BY saving Lord
Godolphin, who was on his way to
Newmarket, from an apoplectic attack.
In London, be became the friend of Sir
Robert WalpOle
"How is it" said Sir Robert, "that
nobody will beat me at billiards, or
me, but DR.. Monsey? ?"
"Other people" said MOnsey. "get
places l get dinner and praise"
One of Monsey's oddities was his way
If extracting teeth. He would some
lines fasten bullet to piece Of cat
gut, which he fastened to the guilty
Doth. He then loaded pistol with
be bullet, and fred. He once pre-
,ailed on a friend to try this strange
,peration but when all was ready the
patient repented, and baWled out to
donsey to stop.
"Stop, stop! I've changed my mind"
"But l haven't, and you're a fool
md coward y said the doctor, pull
ng the trigger, with malicious speed
dousey in old age became miser and
here is story told of his returning
rom a journey to find his servants at a
and just preparing to light a
ire in q CRATE where he had hidden
odd and notes to large amount
ionsey died in his ninety-fifth year,
nd left his body to be dissected. His
than sixteen thousand
to his only daughter.
Taking Of doctors fees, reminds US
f Sir Ashley Cooper and his fifteen
housand pounds year. His largest
se was thrown him in night cap by
n old West India patient. An opera
ion had been performed, and the two
hysicians had received three hundred
uineas each
"But you, sir" said the old man to
ir Ashley, "shall have something bet
or: take that;" and be flung his night
ap at Sir Ashley.
"sir," replied Sir Ashley, "In I
ocket the affront!" The cap contained
J..ct E.. . Al a,,z..l j -,.s-a.z !