davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
SOtherm---IIis Latest Story of a "Rum
Co."

On the special train that whirled the
participants in Edwin Adams's benefit
from New York to Philadelphia IN
ninety-nine- and-a half minutes, Mr.
Sothern related to Miss Lolita, her
mother, Mrs Crabtree, and little
group, a number of those entertaining
anecdotes for which he is noted. / can
not resist the temptation of repeating
some Of the collections that sent tho
merry little ledv and her friends into
such uncontroll; BILE laughter. Mr.
SOthcrn is great on larks,'' and seldom
fails to improve the opportunity. On
one occasion Mr.. Toole and he were
breakfasting with party of friends at
an inn at Green wich. No sooner had
the 7raitet left the room for an instart
then Sothern proposed that they SHOULD
remove the plate from the cloth and get
under the table, This they did without
loss of time, taking every article Of
silveware off the table, down to the
spoons, and taking the precaution to
leave the window open. After they had
waited On instant the door opened and
the waiter reappeared. "Hello" he
cried seeing the company gone also the
silver, and the window wide open,
81 here's a rum gol I'm blessed if they
afn't run away with the silver Here
Dick, Ito a waiter who was passing), tho
gentlemen as run away with the silver
Help me find the guv'nor! With that
he made basty exit; whereupon the
party resumed their places, after shut
ting down the window and replacing the
dishes, the knives, the forks and the
spoonsf waen the guy'nor" appeared
breathless and ,ctrsing, not loud but
deep, he found q parts Of gentlemen IN
tue full possession Of his silverTafe
quietly discussing the fish, for the pre-
paration of which the hostelry was noted
His ejaculation of rage changed to as
tonishr1ent and relief. " Eth, what!
said be. " eve. ything sicnrel Why,
James. you blarsted rascal, what do you
meant " So help me. guy nor,
protested the inystifed garcon. " You're
drunk. you ldiod said the incredulous
master. Gentleman, I beg your par
will withdraw. and the gentlemen
yelled their mirth with the napkins, and
a smile of forgiveness stole over each
innocent face.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
Mahmond Damad's suItana.


Constantinople Correspondent OF the London I mes.
Mahmoud Damad is still the strong
man keeping the palace, and as there
seems no prospect of a stronger than he
coming, it is quantity characteristic of
the East that the eyes of the Porte are
Just now turned in desperation to-a strong
er woman-his wife
The lady is a Sultana, sister by the
same father and mother to the Sultan,
and, by the laws of Turkey, Sultana has
peculiar privileges and rights, which go
far to make up for the Wrongs of the hum
bier, and, from our point Of view, much
oppressed portion Of her sex. Her hus-
band is. unlike other Turkish lords OF the
creation, not allowed TO possess any other
woman but her, whether rs wife, eoncu-
bine or slave. He cannot enter her harem
in bis own house, or, when he has entered
take a seat in her presence without her
permission. The discipline to which he
is subjected is, in fact, so severe that, even
should he find pair of male slippers out
side the harem door. he must forbear the
husbands right recognized in most parts
of the world, and Immediately retire with
out any i'll Judged inquiry into their own
orship or raison d'etre, it being very prop
erly assumed that Sultana ID at 4 social
and moral attitude above all possibility OF
indiscretion.
The lady in question is said to have q
character and temper which fully fiji
her to exercise her privileges, should the
proper occasion arise, and she is now be-
lieved to resent the influence exercised
over her brother by her husband. The
alleged eause OF her resentment, which is
of recent origin, one cannot give, without
violating the sacred threshold of the ha-
rem, but its existence is no secret 1t is
spoken about as if it were a matter OF
state, and the gravest political calculations
are based upon the chance of its duration
The Sultan is known TO be greatly at
tached to his sister, and 1t Is, indeed
through her that Mahmoud Damad gain
ed ascendency at the palace. There would
therefore, after all, be nothing very sur
prising however quaint from an English
point of view, if he lost his power through
the same source by which he acquired it
nor would it be by any mears the frs
time that burning question in he hareu
did for Turkey what could not be done by
the subtIest counsellors or the weighties
/ considerations of state,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
The Beauty of the BIsmarcks.

There is a pretty legend in connection
with the Bismarck family which goes to
show how the oak leaves adjoining the
Bismarck shield were added to the clover
and the nettle leaves 1t runs es fellows
Many years ego there was lovely maid
en-. Gertrude Won Bismarck. Numbers OF
noble knights and courtiers sought her
hand and heart, but she was, by her own
consent and her fathers wish, betrothed
to a cousin, a noble and princely youth.
One day there came 10 the castle where
the beautiful Gertrude lived prince OF
the Wenden, with one hundred horsemen,
to try and win. She eourteouslY, but
firmly, refused him. The prince was
greatly enraged, and, melted by her love
illness, determined to gain her; so he
called his warriors and said he would
break the clover-leaf (Gertrude) with
his own hand.
On the same day he assailed the castle
which was but weakly defended The
castelar, was soon overcome, and Wen
den entered the castle, and then the mai
den's chamber II come to break you In,
you golden clover-leaf. You don't sting
ike singing nettles. Clover does not
sting be said, and with that he put his
arm around her. A moment more and he
Withdrew il, crying out, "Mercyl Ger
trude held dagger over him, then struck
IL into his heart, saying The nettls
stings hard whoever will break or touch
BismaIck's golden clover. Since then
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
SUMMARY OF THE GENERAL NEWS.
weekly Review of English Crops

LONDON. Dec. THE Mark Lane Ex-
press says in its weekly review Of the British
corn trade, English wheat continues TO be
marketed sparingly in London and the pro-
vinces. Imports Of foreign wheat into Lon
don have not been so excessive as Of late.
Mondays return gives about coco quarters.
The falling Of is chiefly noticeable I'm Indian
produce, Of which prospective imports may be
more moderate as Calcutta advices speak Of
an inadequate state Of inland transport and
consequent difficulty Of chaTterers in fulfilling
their agements. The open season has en-
abled shipments 10 be continued from st. Pc
tersburg, and our market remains well sup
Piled with useful classes Of Russian wheat. a
good inquiry was experienced for American
descriptions, but shipments are not taking
place so freely. Business has been exceeding
" quiet but prices show an advance Of
a shilling per quarter on al descriptions.
The requirements Of the country are being
fully met by the weekly importation Of wheat,
and the present attitude OF the trade is devoid
Of speculation. Strict attention Is being
turned to political affairs and the probable fu-
ture action Of America. Maize has lost some
Of its recent activity, but full prices
are still attainable, and unusually light i'm
ports Of the grain render il unlikely that any
marked decline viii occur as long a. southern
European ports remain blockaieG, and the ex-
port movement IN America Is directed upon
wheat grinding. Barley has improved six
pence 70 a shilling per quarter at Mark Lane
and in the country Oats and other varieties
Of feeding corn have met with sale at late
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
A Talking Rears

An artist has recently published, in a
French journal, an account of his Swiss
sketching tour. On beautiful afternoon
in June, of the presend year, he left his
hotel in Intelaken, went out alone with
his camp-stool and easel; and srtayed as
far as the foot of the .Jungfrah. As he
was about to begin his Sketch lie was
startled by seeing, few yards in front
of him, huge bear, that growled
ferociously, He seized a six-chambered
revolver, and leveled ii at the beast, but
before ne could fire, he heard the words,
" Halt halti' The bear sat on his hind
legs and wrung his fore-paws. WHAT
cried the arts, : do bears speak Eng
li6hi'' Then holding the revolver close to
the nose of the pretended beast, lac de-
manded, /" What dost thou in this occurs
ed costumelr The rogue in the bears
skin replied that he was merely earning
his living. He was a driver by profess
sion, but the season had been very bad
one, anil lie Vas obliged to take another
trade. He had entered into a campact
with a number of guides to cloth himselE
in a bear skin, Which can assure you
is as lot as purgatory in such weather az
this and plant himself in one Of the
fayorite mountain paths. "When one of
nv associates comes along this road with
a tourist. I suddenly show myself. The
foreigner is ready to die with fright, but
the courageous guide rushes at me and
drives me away, naturally receiving a
very handsome doueeur for his bravery
in risking his own life in order to
preserve that of his employer" In the
evening the bear and the guide generally
met at an inn aud divided the spoil.
The bear pleaded so pitcously that the
artist did not have the heart to have him
arrested
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
A Genuine Surprise.

Boys brought up on the sea-coast of
the British Islands have usually passion
for the sea, and by the time they reach
the age of fourteen or fifteen years they
generally come to the conclusion 10 run
away from home and ship as apprentices
on board the Newcastle GOLFERS or foreign
trading vessels. Indeed, it may be said
with perfect truth, that the merchant
navy of Great Britain is largely recruited
from such runaways, and there are few
men of shore going occupation, whether
merchants, clerks, artisans or laborers,
who cannot look back to one OF these run
away experiences in their own lives. 1t
would be destroying the romance of the
thing for boy to ask the consent of his
parents to go to sea; he must run away
and ship on his own hook, as all sailors
have done from time immemorial. Many
of these boys arrive in Newcastle on Tyne
without cent in their pockets, and so
worn out that they are not able to walk
the remainder of the way to the shipping
port-Nortb ehields--which is eight
miles down the river. These boys are
frequently referred TO the keelman, and
these worthless never hesitate to give boy
passage down the river in their wher-
ries. On one occasion a couple of boys
were given passage by a keelman, and
on the passage he had the curiosity to look
into the bundles they carried. They
opened them, and, after displaying their
Sunday clothes and white shirts, pipes
and tobacco, the latter of which the keel
man took possession of, one pulled out a
bar of soap.
what is that." the keelman inquired
"a bar of SOAP" answered the boy.
SAY man; is it good for eatin'3'' said
the keelman.
"Good for eating said the boy smil
ing "No; that's for washing yourself
GAY man, dye say sac, said the keel
man, "an' how div We use itl'
"Why, you wash yourself with it,
said the boy. ITS soap, don't / tell
your
"Ay but it's hard, and dinna see ony
water in il, observed the keelman, as he
examined it and held it between him and
the light.
The boy drew bucket Of water from
the river, and with the soap washed his
face, the keelman watching him curl
ously.
SAY, ay, sec" said the keelman; "but
| never would thout it. Man. man
what inventions there is in this yearth.
Let me try that
The keelman tried the process, but as
he had not been washed for some twenty
years before, the incrusted dirt came off
only in spots, and when he looked in the
glass, which one of the boys carried in his
Il ! I. 4
"What is itl It's made me like q
leopard i the circusm
As may be surmised, that keelinah
never tried the experiment again. AS he
was constantly carrying coal, the white
spots soon healed over and he recovered
from his fright, but be never atterward
looked upon piece of soap without a
feeling of aversion.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
A Sensible Girl.

They were seated together, side By side
on the sofa in the parlor, in the most ap
proved lover-fashion-his arm encircling
her taper waist, etc.
Lizzie he said. syou must have read
my heart ere this you must know how
dearly love YOU
Yes. Fred" she answered, very calm.
ly; "you have certainly been very atten-
tive.s
"But Lizzie, darling, do you love me;
Will YOU be nv wifei'
"Your wife, Fred Of all things. No.
indeed nor any one else's."
'LiZzie, what do mean.
Just what say, Fred. I've two mar
ried sisters
Certainly; and Mrs. Hopkins and Mrs.
Skinner have very good husbands, l be-
Ieven
$50 people say; but wouldn't like TO
stand in either Mays or Nell's shoes
thet's allih
uLizzie, YOU astohish the"
Look here, Fred; I've had over twenty
Eve sleigh-rides this winter, thanks 70
you mad my gentlemen friends Fred
WINGED little here, whether at the re-
membrane of that unpaid livery bill, or
at the idea of Lizzie's sleighiRg with her
other gentlemen friends, cannot posi-
lively aver. How many do you think
nv sisters have had not the sign of one,
either of them. Such pretty girls as May
and Nellie were, too, and so much attens
ton a they used to have"
/ Nov, Lizzie
I'm fond of going to the theater ocr
casionally, as well as to lecture or con
cert sometimes, and / shouldn't like it, If
/ / proposed attending any such entertain
ment, 20 be invariably told that times
we're hard, and my husband couldn't
afford il, and then to have him sneak Oh
/ alone"
Lizzie, Lizzie"
And then, if once in dogs age he
did eondescend to go with me anywhere
+ in the evening, | shouldn't like to be lett
to pick my way along the slippery places,
at the risk breaking my of neck, he walk
4 ing along unconseiously by my side.
+ I'm of q dependents, elinging nature, and
l need the protection of strong arm"
Lizzie, this is all nonsense
I'm the youngest of our family, and
perhaps I've been a little spoiled. at all
events, know il would break my heart
to have my husband vent all the i'll temp
er which he conceals from the rest Of
the world on my defenseless head
" But, Lizzie,I promise you that T.
"Oh, yes Fred: know what you are
going to say-that you will be different !;
/ but Nav and Nell have told me time and
time again that no better husband than
theirs ever lived, and I'm inclined TO be
lieve them. No, no, Fred; as a lover
you are Jus. perfect, and l shall awfully
late to give you up. Still, if you arc bent
on marrying, there are plenty of girls
who have not married sisters, or who arc
not wise enough to profit by their ex-
ample, If they have. And don't ffct
about me, for I've no doubt | can find
some one to fill your place
But before Lizzie had concluded, Fred
made for the door, muttering something
uncomfortable 10 ears polite
"Therel" exclaimed Lizzie, as tbs
street door closed with bang Il kne.t
he was no better then the rest. Tina. :
precisely the way John and Alec swear
and slam the doors, when things don't go
right He'd make a perfect bear of
husband; but I'm sorry he came TO the
point so soon, for he was just splendid
/ keau"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13

appeared as Lep0rello, and when the
proper moment arrived the demons
promptly fell upon him and endeavored
to drag him off to the internal regions,
with the greatest vigor. In vain the ex-
asperated basso struggled and strove to
explain that rhey had fastened upon the
wrong man. The supes were used to
realistic acting, and fired the enraged
artist down into the bowels of the earth
with mastery pecision. While the dis
gusted Lep0rello was kicking his assail.
ants around through Hades, and swear
ing ike savings hank depositor,
GioeaHni himself stood thunderstruck,
and too bewildered to move. He was
finally ANONYMOUSLY led off by the
prompter, in his shirt-sleeves. and up to
one p. m. to-day had made four several
attempts to commit suicide. The demons
are now hiding in the foothills under
assumed names.-SaR Francisco Necs
letter.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
hyperion. mining Mitigation.

Eleven cases have been brought in the
United States district court in Salt Lake,
against Liberty L. Halden, formerly Of Cleve-
land Ohio, and four corporations, defendants,
by stockholders residing in Cleveland, Toledo,
Detroit a4id Kalamazoo, Michigan, involving
the title and produce Of a group Of valuable
mines in Bingham, Utah Territory known as
the old telegraph mines. It IS stated Halden
realized, working these mines during the last
eighteen months over 100000. The action
is brought 10 recind pretended purchasers Of
stock Of Eastern stockholders By Hald"n while
he was acting as general manager Of the COM
panies based on the alleged suppression Of the
knowledge Of the fact that the mines were
largely productive, and further the fact Of his
misrepresentation IL large sums " money. II
j. claimed that the nominal sums paid 10
stockholders on alleged purchases Of their
stock, belong to them Is dividends. The cases
attract general attention Judge Schaller
granted a temporary Injunction. The hearing
for the appointing % a receiver is set down for
December 21th.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
How an Agent Repeated the History
of Life Insurance.

An insurance canvasser tells the fol.
lowing story:
l had been visiting and Working with
See, a good agent in Central New York.
lie was full of fun and days work, with
cheek like brass log and head like a
tenpenny nail. We had worked hard
with scanty results. We had travelled
twenty-five miles to see a inan, only to
learn that he had moved "out west a
month agoi we had convinced another by
q hafd four hours talk that he should
Insure his life, only to learn that his faith
er and mother had died of consumption,
that he had some little trouble with his
lungs-'not enough TO matter anything
bless your soul, as sound n man as YOU
will find in all this section ne Course
we didn't want his money. Toward
Night OF the fourth day we weariedly
wendell our winding way, with only five
small applications of insurance, into a
little town where See was well gSauaint-
ed, Stopping ~ The doctors office.
which wss on the second floor of a neat
building, and open, he said: "I've got
two or three good cases here who can be
easily written up: you take a seat and I'll
go out and find one and bring him in. .
In few minutes he came back with this
pleasant faced, rather plainly dFesaed
man, whom he inttoduoea, saving: "Mr.
Green; want 10 introduce you to Mr.
Frssenden, who has been thinking of
life-insurance, and would like to have
you give him full explanation Of the
principles of the business and descrip-
ton of the plans of the Company He
turned TO me and said: ''IIe don't talk
much, bat he IS very an.ious 10 hear;
tell him The whole story" Mr. F ssen-
den bowed. extended his hand for a
shake, and sat down in a listening atti-
tude, and began. If | ever tried TO
give a full history of life insurance, |
did this time he looked pleased and in
tcrested. | then took UP tho plans of
the Company; and expatiaied upon their
many adtantages at considerable length,
concluding with the question: well,
Mr.. Fessenden, what do you think of life
insurance. There was no answer, but
the same steady, pleasant gaze. rs
there anything further which l can es-
plain to your Again 30 answer and no
change of expression, IL had lust
dawned upon me that there were mice in
the building, when ripple of laughter
came from the head of the stairway. and
Mr.. Fessenden handed Inc a card bear
ing the Inscription: II am deaf AMI
dumb; Mr.. See said you would make me
hear if anybody could" In my fierce
anger, / hurled my chair at the open
stairway; after a prolonged rumbling,
mixed with hard words, heard from the
bottom a voice saving: s.NeIL he said he
wanted to hear, and knew you wanted
to talk" This closed my engagement
with Mr.. See: / can't bear man who
will take advantage of unsophIsticated
innocence in any such wav.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
A Smart Newsboy.

Did you ever sec that little mite OF a
newsboy who goes skipping about Fourth
street in the vicinity Of the Gazette and
Commercial offices like the last mosquito
in house full of fat boarders just in
from the countTyl Well, that boy ism I
much bigger than washergoman' :
bank account but he can sell more
papers than full grown man. It's
really interesting TO SIZE him flying about
the street like chicken hunting for Its
head-first on one side-then over to the
other-tumbling about under peoples
feet climbing up mans leg to shove a
paper into his face-losing his hat and
running back to get there one minute
away down yondez the neXt-all eyes
and ears-seeing every hand that starts
toward a pocket, and getting at the side
of It's owner before the nickle can see
daylight. He's little, but he's ''busi-
ness and is said to support widowed
mother by his exertions. We don't
think the sluggard would fool away any
time in keeping an eye on him for
spell.-Ciaoinnat Sunday Breakfast
Table.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
A Dodge Of Swiss Guides.

An artist has recently published in a
French Journal an account of his Swiss
sketching tour. On beautiful after
noon in last June he left his hotel in In
terlake. went out alone with his camp
stool and easel, and stTayed as far az the
foot of the Jungfrau. As he was about to
begin his sketch he was startled by seeing,
few yards in front of him, huge bear,
that growled ferociously. He seized ire
volver and leveled il at the beast but be-
fore he could fire he heard the words,
eHaltl haiti" The bear sat on his hind
legs and wrung his fore paws what J"
cried the artist, do bears speak FnglishSS
Then holding the revolver cleso TO tn
nose of the pretended beast, he demand
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-12-13
Table-Etiquette.

Oil City Derrick.
In newspaper article on table-eti-
quette, Mrs. Henry Ward Beecher SAYS
that in lianding your plate up to have it
replenished you should first remove the
knife and fork, and thus prevent their
being iostled off by those annoying acct
dents which are so liable to occur. APP
preeiating the fact that it looks awkward
to hold the knife and fork in your hand,
and equally suspicious to stick them In
voIr pocket, the lady recommends that
Won Law them down ION the solitaire or
niece Of bread" so as not to soil The
cloth. Mrs Beecher ought 10 remember
that we do not all receive a salary of
twenty-five thousand dollars year and
three months at the White Mountains,
and are not, therefore, likely TO be pro-
vided with solitaires. Even in the case
of those persons who ean afford such
luxury it seems TO us to be asking gre
deal of them to take it off for the pun
pose of rropping up a greasy knife and
fork. And then, If man lays down his
solitaire in company he takes a great risk
Of never seeing it again this side of the
grave. 1t were cheaper, we take it. to
grease the table cloth and pay the dam
ages after dinner-buy new cloth, if
need be, and take the old one home for a
horse-blanket. The horses would not
kick because of a grease-spot or two. A
mule, though, would kick the roof off
the stable on much less proyocation.
son the solitaire or piece of bread"
Looking at it again, we see in it hole for
a man TO crawl out of who has no dia-
mond. But why would not a biscuit do
just as well as piece Of bread. Or, in
the absence of either bread or biscuit
fellow is liable to eat them, you know
how would a cold potato do! Or,
again. how would It do TO wipe the knife
and fork on your halr,-but these things
will suggest themselves 70 man IN an
pn1erCpncY.