Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1877-08-16
Ant1urnns department.
JOHN BULGER,S MISTAKE.

Bulger is one of those young men who are
forever trying to say something comical at
another persons expense, and unfortunately
never succeed. The other day Bulger was ri
ding down town ia horse car, when rustic
looking gentleman entered the car and took
seat directly opposite from where he sat.
As there we're several persons in the Cal. Bull
ger seemed to think that it would be an ex-
cellent opportunity for him to get off some Of
his extraordinary wit. So, addressing him
self to the old gentleman opposite, he said in
tone loud enough to be heard all over the
car:
"Hem-how was everything in the lunatic
asylum when you came away2"
But no one seemed to appreciate the joke,
excepting one old woman, who really didn't
see anything to laugh at, but grinned just
out of politeness. The old gentleman, al.
though taken by surprise, quickly recovered
himself, and looking steadily at Bulger a
moment, his face suddenly frightened ex-
tending his hand, he said, with mischievous
twinkle in his eyes:
"Wall, I swow didn't know yer, but l
kinder thort seed them clothes before; fit
fust rate, don't they? How dye like the
shirt? Looks all right; wouldn't know but
what twas yours; needs washin', though. It's
too tarnation bad them boots are so small yer
can't wear stockings with 'em but if I do say
it myself, that's good leather in them boots,
and I shouldn't gin them to yer if they had
mt been so everlastingy too big for me. The
old hat, that looks material, too. I got that
hat second hand from a fellow for twenty
cents; lust as good as a twenty-five cent; q
blind man wouldn't know the difference. My
stars! tryin' to get whiskers, amt ye, or is
that dirt on yer lip? Why don't ye wear
that yaller'n- green neckerchief I gin yer ?
Looks a tremendous sight better'n that red
thing you've got on. What! ha! ha! &c
Whitiker! that's good un. I'll be darned
if you hain't got that collar on t'other side
up" (Bulger wears stand.up collars "Looka
so queer couldn't help laughin'. Amt yer
kinder fraid you'll tumble down some time
and stick the pints inter yer neck? How did
yer get a chance to ride in the hoss-car
Know the feller what takes the money, don't
yerP
"Sir" screamed Bulger, just recovering
from his astonishment, and getting chance
for the first time to put in word. "Sir!
"Tut tut p continued the gentleman from
the country, "you needn't say word, know
just how it is; I should feel the same way
myself if anybody took me from the poor
house and give me some decent clothes. Yer
needn't thank me; don't want ter hear.
But must get off the hoss-car; and if you
feel the least mite chilly without under clothes
don't be ashamed to come round and ask for
them. But don't forget to come to my house,
and not 60 near the lunatic asylum, for they
are mighty strict there, and | know they
wouldn't let you out again. Wall, so long
take care of yourself"
So saying, he sprang lightly from the car
and walked away, while Bulger, with his face
perfectly livid with rage, gasped:
ats lie! I never saw the old fool before
in my life"
But as the passengers still continued to
laugh, he left the car in disgust, and was last
seen, with his hat pulled over his eyes, sneak
ing down side street. Poor Bulger! The
way of the transgressor is not pleasant.