The New Bloomfield, Pa. times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1877-188?, 1877-05-29
CLERICAL EMBARRAssMENTs.


IA necticut relates couple of Incl
dents aptly illustrating the embarrass-
ments under which gentlemen of the
cloth are often placed, provided they are
gifted with keen appreciation of the
humorous. Every one has felta tendency
on occasions of solemnity to laugh at
the slightest incident calculated to pro-
woke mirth, and the worthy rector of
- parish shares this feeling in COM
mon with his lay brethren. From his
elevated position of course every move
ment among his hearers is noticeable,
and be confesses that it often requires
an effort to preserve sedate counte-
nance when witnessing the tricks of
restless urchins or the actions of eccen-
trio individuals.
The instances to which he refers as
particularly amusing were due to the
presence of dogs, which appear to have
an unaccountable liking for churches
| During the early part of the services on
Sunday in Lent,a saucy-looking, ,frisky
little cur slipped along up the main
aisle, and encountered hat just out
side of the new pews. He first smelled
of it cautiously, then nosed it around
for moment, and finally, picking it up
in his mouth, shook it vigorously. By
this time several persons had their eyes
on the dog, and the sexton came tiptoe-
ing up the isle in pursuit, while the
owner of the hat seized his cane and
poked at the animal. Finding his situa-
ton uncomfortable, the cur trotted
leisurely up the aisle to the platform,
thence along to and down a side aisle,
shaking the hat all the way with evil
dent satisfaction. The sexton summon
ed assistance, and an energetic but quiet
chase was organized, so as not to disturb
the services, to which, however, few in
the congregation were now giving at
tention.
Nearly every face in the house was
either lighted up by smile or distorted
bya grin, and the clergyman had hard
struggle to restrain his emotions as he
witnessed the clever way in which the
dog again and again lodged his pur-
suers, still clinging to the hat, which
was by this time only a wreck of its
former self. Finally, the cur made his
escape through an opened door, and
order was restored. But the climax, of
the clergyman at least, came moment
later, when, in continuing his reading,
he encountered warning reference to
dogs-Matthew, XIV, 26. In running
his eye down the page he fortunately
detected it before the words came to his
lips, and like flash the thought occur
red to him that to read this, after what
had happened, could not fail to provoke
merriment both on his own part and
that of his hearers. AS the best course
out of the dilemma, therefore, he skip
ped the Objectionable sentence, and none
of his hearers suspected the true reason
of his strange expression of countenance
and faltering tone at the time. He had
conquered, but not wishing to endure a
second trial, gave the sexton rigid orders
for the future concerning dogs.
Only few weeks afterward, however.
and while the affair above related was
still fresh in his memory, another ad-
venture of the same nature occurred
A country couple came into the city to
be married, and the service was per-
formed in the church. Accompanying
the couple was brother of the bride
groom, who brought dog with him
the groom having one also, and both
having escaped the notice of the sexton
The brother seated himself in a front
pew, and undertook the task of keeping
both dogs quiet. At first they were in
the aisle, but eventually the brother
lured his own dog into the pew, and
placing the animals head between his
knees, held him fast. Then he endeav.
ored to entice the other into the pew by
swapping his fingers softly and uttering
low whistles, all of which the clergy.
man could not avoid noticing. The stray
animal would come as far as the pew
door, but then, seeing the scrape in
which his companion had become in
volved by overconfidence, would turn
tail and trot away. Then followed re