The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1877-11-08
THE STANDARD
Miscellaneous.

look out Tor the cloven loot.
Chestnuts are almost ready for the
Diet Of Worms.
A man born to command is different
from one made to order.
Spring openings: rattraps. Fall open
ings: chestnut-burs.
Red Cloud wants the pockets of his
tribe to have silver lining.
"What will become of the last man p
says scientific exchange. Why, manu-
featuring shoes by machinery is knock
ing him out of the business.
A man declares that it is impossible
for him to keep out of trouble, for in the
best of times his business drives him to
the wall He is bill-poster.
A lady has just been appointed princi-
pal OF a high school we know Of From
which it is fair to assume that the motto
of the trustees is principals, not men,
young lady the other day, after a
sun.shower, was heard to exclaim:
What an elegant trimming that rainbow
would make for a whitelac overdress 7
III Is aHuOQnCGQ IL GHGGEluE SlEh VI
the progress of civilization among the
Indians that the Cherokee natives have
a debt and are unable to pay the interest
upon it.
At the Washington fire, thieves watch.
ed for an opportunity to steal Patent
Office reports. This shows how hard the
times are.
The circulation of the religious week
lies has fallen off sadly since Prang's
chrome establishment burnt up.
Why should the spirit of mortal be
proud has stood pretty well the wear
and tear of a conundrum's experience,
but tougher one is why barber should
eat onions
Next to English sparrows there is no
thing that increases faster than potato
bugs, unless it is the interest of an un-
paid note.
While we were wrestling with the mo
mentous question of unemployed labor,
let US pause to consider how steadily and
lucratively employed is the man who
minds his own business.
There is, once in a while a woman in
this country who thinks that household
management stops at the making Of u
worsted dog
Some day an editor will lose few dol
lars by bank bursting and then you'll
hear newspaper howl at the loose man
ner in which such institutions are con-
Quoted.
Troy man died recently while saying
bis prayers but the chances for frequent
fatalities OF this kind are not sufficiently
numerous to create a panic in Central
New York.
Learned professors know about 10000
words children of two from 200 to 705
ordinary people 10000; book agents,
9,980,999 When they have learned the
word quit their education will be com
plete.
They had a seance up in Fishtown the
other evening and brought the material
lied spirit Of Lindley Murray in, and
when Lindley answered a question with
my wishes has been granted, there was
no mistaking his identity.
Crazy Horse, an exchange says, was
the possessor of thirty four scalps, not
counting his own, and the Indians con
sIdered him quite a rich man" And the
cream of the thing is, this bloated scalp
holder was the architect Of his own for
tune. Every lock OF hair he possessed
was of his own raising
Mt Carmel, Illinois, that was destroy
ed by a tornado last summer, has recu
perated so far as to cry out that it want
a national bank. We should think
savings bank, on the Chicago plan, would
suit better; it wouldn't make such
racket as the tornado, but il wouls
sweep things q great deal cleaner.
lady sent note to the newspaper L
get q recipe to cure the whooping cougl
in pair Of twins. By a mistake Tecip
for picking onions was unconsciousl
inserted, and her name attached, an,
received this answer through the "Ar
swers to Correspondents Mrs. l.. II
B.--If not too young. skin them prett
closely immerse in scalding water
sprinkle plentifully with salt, and in
merse them for a week in strong brine.
A clergyman was annoyed by peopl
talking and giggling lie paused, locke
at the disturbers, and said: 81 am a
ways afraid to reproye those who misb
have, for this reason. Some.years since
as / was preaching, young man who So
DGIOTG me was constantly Adil
ing and making uncouth grimaces.
paused and administered a severe rebulx,
After the close of the service a gentl
man said to me, Sir, you have made
great mistake; that young man is a
idiot Since then | have always bee
afraid to reprove those who msbeha'
themselves in chapel, lest should repet
that mistake and reprove another idiot
During the rest of the service there wi
good order.
Jones says that flannel suit he bougl
year ago has proved very economic
investment. Jones weighs two hundr,
and fifty pounds, and when he bought
it fitted him remarkably we'll After Il
first WARNING his eldest son, who weigl
one hundred pounds less than Jon'
Senior, found it an excellent fit. Ty
washings more made the garment sui
BILE for youth of nine, and at the end
the season the baby was adorned wi
the habilments, which had shrunk ju
enough to make them fit for child o
of creeping clothes.
boy" said gentleman to the hostl
of q hotel, on alighting from his phRto
"extricate that quadruped from the vel
Gle, stabulate him, donate him an a,
auate supply of nutritious aliment al
when the aurora of morning shall aga
illuminate the oriental horizon | W
award thee pecuniary compensation
thine admirable Hospitality" The b
ran into the house and told his mast
that a Dutchman wanted TO see him.
Odd Mistakes.
Col. Slnart In his "Reminiscences O