The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1877-11-24

the proceedings.
Mr.. Bachelor read his lecture The various organ
cations, faculties and degrees OF pain and happiness
were discussed In technical me dnerent
where some suffered pain s.hers enjoyed happiness
a. nine O'CLOCK the chairman announced that the
genteman's time was ended.
BREEzE.
IEcruRER-I win require about seven minutes more
An AUDiToR-I move that tho gentleman's time DO
extended seven minutes.
A Liberal MEMBER-I should prefer that we pro-
ceed with the order OF business Tho aontleman's
CHAInMXs-All in favor Of extending the time say
aye.
A voIcE-Aye.
CHAIRMAN-carred
Mr. Bachelor continued. A blonde lady, with 90
quettsh PINK trimming in her hat smiled sarcasti-
cally. The old gentleman IN front sighed YEARLY
DEBATING THE LECTURE
The audience next invited TO debate the various
points Of the lecture During It's progress number
oil medical students had arrived and arranged them
selves in The pearest seats to the door. They nearly
all carried canes and evidently meant coup detdf OF
some description
1--WE believe 10 free speech, E" said tho chairman,
''whilo we decry personalities :"
SECOND BREEZE.
Mr.. Duncan, pae-faced, slender gentleman, with
waving locks and captivating whiskers first advanced
and said he surprised wnen reading the announce
ment OF the lecture He was equally surprised At the
lecture ITSELF (Hisses What was the assumption Of
this whole thngs II was that pain arose because
there no organ to give itrosL tDersive laughter
edge OF the public sch0olboy u would be impossible
for him 20 write that lecture. (Hisses.) s
Hcre the disturbance At the end OF the hall became
MI DuNcAr-A man goes into hail where there is
music, ana because he has not wal'zed ne cannot
(Cappng OF hands by the students.)
AN ORGAN WANTED
Mr. DUNCAN excitedy ana slapping the desk)-
Where there IS no organ there s capacity TO appre
ciate pain happiness That is the position Cheers
The asks whether there are any contradictions
In his lecture Why 1t is full OF contradictions II Is
the most absurd thing ever heard. (Hisses) he
says organ that exhausted to be an organ
According to what ne tells US an exhausted organ
feels pain.
some other similar home thrusts wore given by
Mr.. Duncan. when he sat down with the air Of
victor
good deal Of stamping and sneezng now took
place. Tho nine lad les placed their handkerchefs 10
their noses. Frequent sounds, like wind passing
through kcyholes aud FISH norns, were waited rom
the direction Of tho gentleman with tho silvery
locks nearly every Of tho one hun
dred auditors added some peculiar note TO
the general chorus oil noses dust from The floor
ana perfect Babel Of Nnasal conversation' went on.
This uproar did not deter DR.. +. H. Van der Weyde
from mounting tho rostrum The Doctor 10 avenera-
Bile gen eman Of about seventy, the type OF Jeler-
sons Rip Van WinKie He spoke IN broken iones--a
dialect onc-quarter Dutch, one quarter French one
an accent peculiarly his own. He hoped
the lecture of that night would be warning to other
lecturers The lecturer taxed the patience of his au-
ditors by stating the same thing over and oyer again
saying things that might well be left out In order to
come TO the knowledge OF tho truth we should doubt
everything.
The coughing and sneezing here became noisy
that the Doctors became inaudibe except to
Gan that know''-he said sneeze blow and cough)
ais very little'-tsneeze, blow and cough).
"When think Of what we are.' blow, sneeze
"Paln is perceptiblc." Cough, sneeze and blow)
ssHappincss tonight" IDA capo
''Organs are organs" (Da capo)
GUN
Thus tho tumult kept up, when DR.. Gum took the
floor He da not notice the noise Sas went right on
in listening to tho lecture he said sneeze, cough,
81 must therefore 10 deficient in somo OF the
organs" "a peculiar snort from the venerable 'ib-
erat'D
The lecturer is not familiar with positions OF nerve
ceDtres--all his propositions are peculiar. He an
nounced~lhe ridiculous theory, f we suffer pain 1t
IS because OF want Of is the effect OF
living In state of carbonism." IA titterng scream
from OF the nine ladies with fsh-horn accompani-
mont
When Gum had nred of MIS- mltrailleuse sodate
and melancholy visaged gentleman addressed the
to the Phomelhan Society. ! then prepared an
essay. II was lengthy nothing but words IT IS the
same with this lecture. II read something ike me
words III the ship goes down, then she goes down u
she doesn't go down. why she doesn't 80 down."
Applause, stamping Of eet nasal reverbsrations and
coughs.)
Professor Rice (attfred IN sable black with promi-
nent nose, upon whish red pepper did not seem to
have any enect)-I don't think tho lecturer knows
mot nose) what he IS talking about he constantly
kept talking Of organ. know OF hand organs. newspa
all over the nousel When ne COOS into met.
aphysical organs we-at least l. nasal
no ses)-can't see IT, Then he talked OF conscience.
Who knows what it Is to have conscienceG don't
know what 1t means Great applause, with nacal ac-
compartments ana cries OF Correct, CORRECTLY rum
medical students) There are some organs at work
here.
sneezing ana cries Of .sYes. yesln and after some
further humorous ebulltons the Professor retired.
FooTE FOREMOST
Mr. Il. B. Foote. pale youth. with classic features.
next .ssneczed.' through few remarks. lie insisted
INT hare w
no alusion 70 the Liberal Cluh)
MCAKTHY's MARE
Mr. Mccarthy thought they had q white elephant on
their hands II born without teeth" no said 1T
Is painful ones teeth. That pain. There IS
ono living tell US about gravitatioD. We know
nothing OF nervous theories" NOISY sneering demon
STATIONS by the ladies) He thought the lecture o
good one.
After somo further remarks the proceeding camo to
O close amid several rounds Of sneezing. motion
was carried 10 clean the rooms before the next meet
ing, to clear away all traces oil "red pepper"