The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1877-02-16
MISCELLlNEO

'Man proposes" but there are still 81,
600 more women than men in Massachu-
sets.
There is skipper in New York who
has been so often across the Atlantic that
he knows every wave by sight.
People are getting more used to head
ing their letters 1877; it is only occasion
ally now that one with '76 comes in.
The saying that "there is more pleasure
in giving than receiving" /" is supposed to
refer chiefly to kicks, medicine and ad-
vice.
When young man sets out in dead ear
nest to comt a girl, the deferential man
ner in which he regards her big brother is
truly remarkable.
Ifall the necessaries of life were as cheap
as medical almanacs, even tramps could
indulge in ten drinks Of whisky per. day
and save money besides.
Some slanderer asserts that paper MAX
ers are the greatest maglcians OF the age,
inasmuch as they transform beggars' rags
into sheets for editors to lie on.
The young lady who wants to drown
herself about these days should be careful
to bundle up warm and take along hot
brick as the water is, very cold.
The Grand Vizier is resigned to resigna-
ton, rather than see his Turkey carved up
into little principalities and parsons noses,
and the situation could hardly be gravy yer.
Every man is said to have at least one
chance to acquire wealth. In the case of
a newspaper man, this opportunity comes
on the 29th Of February every year, except
leap year.
A sermon in Barbados was recently
closed thus: "MY obstinaceous bredren,
I find it no more use to preach to you dan
it is for grasshopper to wear knee
breeches.n
Here lies the body of Mary Ann Lowd-
er; she burst while drinking a seidlitz
powder; called from this world to her
heavenly rest, she should have waited till
it eferyesced.
A handbill signed by Rev. Mr.. Bax-
ter is being extensively circulated in Lon
don, England, announcing the approach
ing translation to heaven of IA, 900 Chris
tians without dying.
The Brooklyn Young Mems Hsthetic
Club are discnssinn the aazzetio>. ELH.Tl-A
can one poor weak woman with club do
against tyrannical husband who crawls
under the bed and refuses to come out|
A Pittsburg editor says: awe were en-
abled to put all our presents in one sock" ;"
We suspect the poor fellow didn't receive
anything but a bushel of potatoes, new
shovel, new paste-pot, and dozen mack
erel.
IT wish I were you about two hours" ;"
she said, with great tenderness. "Why,
my dear 2" he asked, with considerable in
terest. Because" she said, toying afec-
tionately with his watch-chain, "because
then I would buy my wife a new set OF
furs."
The other day some Of the boys intro
duced a young man from Flint Creek to
take hold Of the handles Of galvanic bat.
terry AS it puckered him up he roared,
"Jeremy Criminy, let up ! Who ever heard
Of a thing that could make you taste green
persimmons with your hands before ?"
There is a cabinet at Windsor Castle
which contains a lock Of the hair Of Mary
Queen of Scots. The lock of hair is large
"a full tress of beautiful golden hair
very fine in texture, and full Of life, like
that of girl of sixteen. II is undoubted
ly authentic.
A kind-hearted clergyman asked a con
Wet how he came to be in jail. The fel
low said, with tears in his eyes, that he
was coming home from prayer meeting
and sat down to rest, fell asleep, ant
while he was asleep there the county bull
the Jail around him, and when he aWok,
the jailor refused to let him out.
Some fellow without the fear of God O
man before his eyes picked an editor
pocket at the Montgomery avenue temper
ance meeting last night, but received nc
thing for his trouble but a couple of deaC
head tickets on railroads, two or three un
paid bills, few editorial selections whicl
were to be "adapted" for his columns, AM
a torn ten cent postage stamp.-Er.
England's national air, God save th
Queen" will have to be elaborated in OF
der to include the added honors of tn
sovereign. Now it must read, "God say
Victoria, by the grace Of God, Of the Uni
:, ed Kingdom Of Great Britain and Irelan
the Queen, and Of the colonies and deper
denotes thereof, Empress of India, d
fender ofthe Faith" twill heneeforth i
! rendered as a recitatiye.
) It is singular how many ladies appea
to be 1eft-handed. It has been observe
! that female passengers in horse-ears an
. Eonanihusses generally have their RIGHT han