The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1877-07-25
Beck'S Death.


there was a railroad and a tclccranh
across the plains. When the ship cot
down in the neighborhood of the West
India Islands, 1t encountered hurricane,
and things got to be so bad that the cap
tain finally announced that the vessel
would certainly go to the bottom There
upon Beck wrote note to his wife, saving
that the ship was about to sink with ali
on board, and that when this reached her
he would be lying dead at the bottom of
the sea. Then he put the note in the
bottle sealed the bottle, and cast it into the
water. The ship, however, came safely
through the storm, and after an unusually
long anu tedious voyage, arrived at San
FRANCISCO. In the meantime somebody
picked up the bottle, sent the note to
Mrs. Beck and announced the loss of the
ship in the newspapers. Mrs. Beck went
into mourning, the life insurance COMPANY
paid her the money due from Becks
policy. Beck's lodge passed resolutions
of regret, his family divided up his prop
erty, and the community settled down
comfortably in the conviction that Beck
was finally and hopelessly dead.
About eight months afterward, how
ever, Beck suddenly arrived in town
without announcing his coming. As he
stepped from the cars a policeman looked
at him minute, then seized him by the
collar and hurried him around to the cor
oners office. Before he could recover
from his amazement the coroner impan-
eled jury, offered the bottle, and the
note, and the actions Of the insurance.
company in evidence, and promptly got
from the jury verdict that ''the said
Beck came to his death from accidental
drowning"
Then Beck went to his house and found
his widow sitting in the front porch talk
ing to Myers, the man to whom she was
engaged to be married. As he entered
the gate his widow gave one little start
of surprise. and then, regaining her com
posure, she said to Myers:
"1sn't this new kink OF an idea:
Dead people coming around when com
mon decency requires them to keep
quiet?"
Its altogether wrong" said Myers.
eff was a corpse I'd lie still and
quit Pickering around on the face of the
earth
"Henrietta, don't you know me:'' asked
Beck, Indignantly.
alive; but now that you're gone, I don't
expect to recognize you until we meet in
the better world.'
But Henrietta. I am not dead. You
certainly see that l am alive
Mot dead! Didn't you write to me
that you were? Am to refuse to believe
my own husband? The life Insurance
company says you are deceased; the lodge
says SO; the coroner officially asserts the
fact. What am to do? The evidenc,
is all one way"
"But you shall accept me as alive: !.
shouted Beck in rage. /
MIR. Myers" said the widow calmly
"hadn't we better send for the under
taker to come and bury these remains:"
"Look here said Myers I'm the
last man to do dead friend an injury.
but amt agoing to have an old PLAYED
out corpse busting in here and giving this
lady Mysteries. You pack up and 90 back
and dive into the ocean and stay there
now, OF I'll have you hustled into a
sepulcher quicker'n wink"
'This beats the very old Harry" said
DECK IN aStOnlSllment.
No answering back now said Myers.
"When l want communications from
the other world, I'll hunt up spiritualist
medium, and get my information OFT O.,
knocks on table. All you've got to do
is to creep off into the water somewhere
and behave. l thought the fish had eat
en- you up long ago. Why didn't you
take your clothes off SOS to give them
some kind of chance:'
"You're perfectly certain I'm dead are
you? said Beck getting calmer.
"Why of course"
"Can dead man violate the laws"
"Certainly not
''Well then, I'm going to hammer you
with this club, and / reckon you'll find
me the most energetic corpse in New
Castle County.
They say that the fight was terrific.
First Beck was on top, then Myers and as
they rolled over and over in the porch.
the widow stood by and enjoyed the scene
excepting when she saw chance to help.
Myers, by poking Beck with the leg OF
the chair. Finally Myers explained that
upon the whole he believed that he had
enough, and when Beck: had given him q
few supplementary thumps, he got UP
and gazing at the PROSTATE Myers and at
the widow, he said:
''Take her, take her, mister! You're
welcome to her. l wouldn't have her if
she was the only woman in the temperate
zone. But let me tell you before YOU get
her, that when you're consolidated with
her, you'll wish something'd happen to
send you down to the bottom of the
ocean and anchor you there She's got
tongue like fsh-Woman, and temper