, 1877-03-18

No expression Of the human counteuance cal
equal the look Of lonesome amaze1ncnt thu
nAshes over the face OF the solitary oyster a
finding himself scoopcd up in gallon of church
sociahle soup.
4 little scariet-fcyer convalescent was over
heard PRAYING repeatedly while about her play
''Oh, good Lori, cure my earacl,e!'' Her moth
| er asked: "What arc you saying, nv iear! g.
Nothing" said the little girl; stI wasn't talk
ing to you, Tin talking to the Lord.''
It would appear that the experience of the
Profitable Lodgcr OF old WAS the same as that oil
the locgcr Of the present day. "For the bed Is
shorter tiian that man can stretch himself on
It, ani the covering narrower than that he can
| wrap himself iu il. it.n-Isaiali xviii, 20
Mother is the necessity Of invention. A young
dozen pairs of nslit slippers from the Young
lady members OF his aock last Christmas, has
sold every last slipper to the Hudson Hay Com
pany Tor t'sh-traps--Burlington Hamkeye,
Last Sabbath morning All eloquent Burlington
minister was earnestly discoursing about Peter
ana Paul and said they were good pair. ~
''Good hand, slcepiiy nur1nurcd half-awak-
cned sport in the back pew, ''takc the not !;
nothing here but acc high. .''-Burlingtoa Hoax
eye.
The Advcntists Of Burr Oak went out to waft
themselves to glory one day last week, but were
Burr Oaken hearted with disappointment when
the pinons failed to arrive as per invoice, and
they were compelled to ny back home on toot-
back, and shin around for something earthly to
get supper with.
Say, Pat, suppose Satan was to come along
now, and see both OF us here, which do YOU sup
pose nc would take, you Or ne!" "0h! faith,
Ycr honor, he'd take me-" 1" How sos'' !" Well,
he wouldn't be sure OF me when he came again;
but he'd be sure Of you at any time and could
afford to wait.''
About twenty years ago somewhat abusive
oppoueut Of the Blptists was publishing book
against them ut the office Of the printer OF the
nets Of the Mississippi Legislature. By some in
adveFtencc che sheets got mixed, and before the
confusion was detected several copies Of the acts
were SO bound Us to exhibit the following as-
t0nishing piece OF Legislation, the grond result
OF thirty years. war against immersion: ''Bc
It enacted by the Senate and House Of Repre-
sentative Of the State Of, Mississippi that 1ap
pull out"
The quality Of pulpit eulogy is sometimes
strAfned- A pastor in Afacon, Ga, was recently
called upon to make few remarks on the clar-
acter Of 4 colored class-lealer who had visited
brothers hen.roost surreptitiously, fallen unex-
pectedly, and broken his neck ir1cnlediaDiy.
The pastor made rather bungling job OF It:
'Tlcre are circumstances connected with this
death that are perplcxing. II, after he fell aud
before he struck the ground he repentcd OF his
sins, there be no question but that he is now
in glory; but there was mighty little time for
him to thin6 about it.'s
The following story OF little boy, son Of
Professor in college not 4 thousand miles from
this city, is told by correspondent who writes
tat the little fellow, who had been trained for
some time past to remove his hat when he went |
into house, came in one day and, In the pres
encc Of bis older sister, who was seated in the |
room as just returned FROM walk, said to his |
mother, 'sMothcr, want to die.'' ''Why do |
you wish to die, liobbie!" "Bccausc want to |
20 up and see God little while" "Why DO
you wish to see Him, my sous" 6 Because l |
want to see if can't be changed into Eirl so |
can wear my hat in the house--Bangor (Ne)
Courier.