The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1877-12-27
WHOLE NO. 1871

the cow Of switching her tail, got up
on the counter and by dint Of bawlin9
| commanded silence and said,
Gentlemen, l propose that tho
court house be built by q committee
OF the whole, and that every member
OF this convention be appointed q
committee Of one to watch every other
member. and that the profits be di-
vlded equally as soon as made.''
Inns equitable proposition was re-
celved with great applause. The
cadaverous man and few Hastings
men objected, but it was carried
nearly unanimously; and a question
which ut one time threatened to dis
rupt the Peoples Party forever was
thus peacefully settled.
In the meantime Steb. and Seaprave
had been hob-nobbing in corner over
bottle: they were, 1.-TWO souls with
but single thought (the bottle:l
''two hearts that beat as one." (both
drunk At this point in the proceed
lngs Seagrave came forward. steady
ing himself by holding on to the coun-
ter.
''Gentlemen,' said he "Eu.Eu-Eu-
reka!''
Il call the gentleman from Buna.
town to ORDER said John Byers,
Eureka isn't before the convention.
1t votes right every time,''
"Tell that darned fool-hic-'' said
Seagrave." to sit down. Eureka is
Latin work-hic-it means I've got
it., and it applies equally well-hic--
to fellow who has caught flea or
the small pox or has made a discovery.
NOw-hic-I've made a discovery.
This convention has assembled to
adopt a platform. 1t can't agree up
on one;-hlc. l have hit upon one
that Will unite us all. It is short. 1t
is to the point. It embraces--hic-
only two words. Here it is:--
.D-n Donnelly.''
The shout that went up at this
was deafening. Steb., under cover
OF the uproar took another pull at the
bottle; an unfair pull, for it was
Seagrave's turn. The little pea-green
man danced around like pint of pop
: corn. ''Our DAM hugged Seagrave.
Byers stood on his head and waved
: his legs in the air. Irving Todd be-
: : gan to wildly collect unpaid subscrip-
: tions from those around him. Bill
: Todd, borrowed plug of tobacco, cut
J, off asquid, pocketed the plug, and
2 handed back the quid; and Steb took
! another unfair pull.
! When the storm had spent itself
. the newly elected Judge Of Probate
= = got up on box Of boots and quietly
remarked, that '.that platform was
} all we'll enough as far as it went, but
it was hardly broad enough to build
a great party on. The whole people
did not sympathize with it. They
expected some declaration of princi.
pies on the great questions Of the
= day. He would therefore offer few
II resolutions
;. "1st Resolped, That the People's
Party of Dakota county is in favor Of
:. the cheap scoool book law
e "Our Dan" rushed forward.
a "a speech from our Dan," cried
,e the pea-green man, "what our Oar
le don't know, gent
D. "Shut up, you darned fool" cried
e O'Leary. "what does he know about
4, probate law! Ittakes lawyer Of ths
e high"
e DRY up" cried the crowd.
20 Charley Baker stopped rubbing Iii,
d shins long enough to state that Dar
T. had the floor.
n Gentlemen" said Dan, "that res
olntion will never do. You nigh
se Just as well break up the party a
once as pass such resolution as that
s, The fact is, gentlemen, that is wha
n, brought me here. / am selling books
rt at Winona. / had first intended K
go to the state senate myself this fall
le from Dakota county, to work for thl
to repeal OF that abominable law; but Al
" | found there were some unjust pref
udices against me / fixed it up, as
I'd thought, SO that whoever would win
er in either party, would be hostile :,
in that law, butu Unfortunately at tn,
Of eleventh hour, that man, whose name
I. came down like the wolf on the fOl(
i'd and you know the result;-it is to,
- painful theme to dwell on. Now
gentlemen, that cruel school book Law
of deprives the booksellers Of the stat.
u of fifty per cent profit on all schoo
| books sold. That profit they hav'
he made for twenty years past tha
profit they will never again make un
he less that law is repealed. l am il
he favor of general education but l an
more in favor Of that fifty De
10 cent. Education is an abstract goo,
but the fifty per cent is positive
in profit. l ask you, gentlemen, wher,
would your party have been this fall
10 but for the money put into the i9h
O. by the scho0l-bOok meni" (Sensation
and cries of chats so!')
&c The resolution was voted down.
The new Judge of Probate looked
le astonished, but he offered his mex
is resolution,
W "Resolred: That this convention
a is in favor of the usury law"
n Here the cadaverous man with th
e. ramrod back rushed wildly forward
sdl tcoNT1NuKD IN OUR NrxT.1