The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1877-12-17
JOsHRILLINGs' PROVERBS.
Ii< Lectures on Sandwiches ana
"specimes- Biix" I'm the Academy
Lat Night.

"specimeE. Rttx' I'm the Ae8dehS
Last Might.
From the Philadelphia Times.
The Academy Of Music WAS fairly
filled last evening by an audience assem-
bled to hear Josh Billings Henry w.
Shaw lecture on Sandwiches and Spec
linen Brix," which consisted of extracts
from his printed works. The lecturer,
with bis spare, bent form, intelligent
face, black nc ustache, full gray wits
kers and long, black hair, flowing to his
shoulders, appeared all over, the typical
Yankee, and this appearance was EN-
phasized by the quizzical, Paul Fry
glance which he now and then cast At
The audience from his bright eyes aS be
arranged the stand in order to obta,L the
best light on the book winch he drew in q
sly manner from beneath his coat.
Il do not propose to speak on the lost
arts" he said, "the rise and decline OF the
Roman Empire, the purchase of the
British Islands by Secretary EVsrts, the
third term, or the we'll settled fact that
the eight spot takes the seven. l simply
propose 10 speak OF everyday facts, by
monogrsms, essays and squibs. The
American wants his humor caustic, on
the hsli-shell, with Cayenne pepper, while
the Englishmsn is satisfied TO take his
fun smothered In mint sauce, and wait
till the next day to digest it. 1t you
want to make an American lsugh or con-
vince him, you have got to do II
luick. Eogland has more wit, and
America more humor." The lecturer
then began his readings from which the
following selections are given:
This lie is like game OF cards. we
must plsy the hands dealt TO us, and the
credit is not 50 much in winning AS IN
playing poor hand we'll
"When hVr man Dragging abou!
what he did last year and what hes go
ing to do next year, csn tell pretty
! near what he's doing now
Don't despise your poor relations
They might get rich some time aud then
it would be so hard to explain things.
THE reputation man gets from his
ancestors wants about rs much altering
| 20 fit him, as their clothes would"
"There is no woman stationed on the
| face of the earth who tries so hard 10 dc
| right and fails oitener than the average
| mother-in-lsw."
"An enthusiast is An individual who
believes about Jour times as much as ne
can prove, snd can prove four times a.
much as anybody else will believe
Failing In love Is like falling dowr
stairs; it's hard work to find ont just how
the thing wa done"
"a man who has been waiting FOL
the last fifteen years for something t
turn up is still in the same business"
"a roodle is womsns pet, and
have seen some l would like to swap
wings with
"Mice can live anywhere comtortsbi.
Int in a church; they grow fat very slow
w in church. This proves that the!
csp't live on religion any more than
minister can" >,
"The worst tyrsnt in this world is
woman who is superior to her HUSBAND
and lets everybody know it."
"Love is like the measles, you can
have it but once, and the later IN lie VI
have it the tougher it goes with US.
@Great thinkers are not apt TO De grea
whistlers. When man cant think o
anything he begins to whistle
] "The man you can have to work on