The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1877-01-26
WHAT THE WITS SAY.

. Connecticut cigar va
The Hastings Union says: "syVe shal
! have a fair count by the Eternal" N,
! doubt, but The. important matter just nov
: is to have fair count by the recognize,
), authorities. = MSnnsapozss Tribune. /.
4 Grace Greenwood speaks Of the unpieas
ant odorsarising from the hair of the labor
t ers in the quicksilver mines. It may, b,
+ tfae that his head is offensive, but the res
Of the laboring man is sweet Norseicl
. Bulletin.
I Philadelphia B@lEetin Those auburn.
haired young ladies with noses suggestive
of : cold morning. and who missed fire
\ during the leap year just passed, now sadly
) sing, :" 1t may be four years and 1t may bs
t for ever" -
: "Was that thunder?" said Fernando
Wood yesterday. "Oh, no." said Sam
Cox with cheerful confidence, Gifts merely
: Brother Cronin blowing his nose. ~ s'H'mv'
said Fernando absently, "another county
heard from. ."'-Kocdester Democrat.
He was well-meaning man but they
had been married long while, and when
= he playfully asked her what was next to
nothing, she sarcastically answered that
at this season of the year she thought his
7 winter flannels were.-Noruich Bulletin.
His last words to her in the morning
were =" Wrap up warmly, darling, if you
go shopping to-day the weather is very
cold" She said she would, and before she
went out she had all her bustles weighed
and put on the heaviest one. What will
not woman do for the man she loves P
Bfooklyn argus. e. > ID Is. -....-... S..
| Softly sings the P. /. man: "The fellow
who proposed the second time sang Carrie
the news to Mary" And when he was
left the second time he chanted, "Emma
pilgrim and Dinah stranger. ."-H HawEeye.
The third time, we suppose, he hummed
"That's what's the Matte with Hannah,
You Bet !"-7Com. Adcerttser. M
A'young lady sat down to write poem
to her Milwaukee lover She began it
thusly:- 5ac
''oh, when shall / rest in thy shelteripg arms ?"
Her quick sense of propriety at once de-
tected the error and she corrected it as
| follows s .-.-
"oh. when shall rest neat thy shelterlng ear?'
argus. ...
1t was very calm last night along the
river, In the north the weird plumes of
the Aurora Borealis waved fitfully. Over
head the stars sparkled with the brilliancy
Isof anoArctic night There was no noise
save now and then the pleasant sound of
splashing waters which denoted that an
other small boy had skated into an air-hole.
All was serene, and beautiful. l.-Noraosch
Bulletin.
4 his rssy .-------
South End weddings: You must enter to
the wedding march from HsLohengrin."
During the Sc, vice the organ plays Ever
be Happy" from the Enchantress" :" in
low tones. As you go out the band strikes
upethe grand march of "Oh, No! Well
Never Get Drunk Amy More!" from
Faust" in honor of the oom.-sanday
Courier.
A brakeman on the Toledo, Peoria and
Warsaw Railway was asked by lady
passenger why they didn't make the tender
with both ends alike, the same as a. passen-
ger car. "Wouldn't never do. ma 'am,"
he replied "be too ambiguous can't have
no double-end tenders in railroading."
(If that isn't the way to pronounce it, that
is the way it looks, all the same. )-Haaok-
eye.
The man has missed a great treat who
has not risen early on a winter morning,
and, turning the Stats, peered out into the
pearly twilight with It's shadows of dun
blue, and seen the soft opal of the eastern
sky Frightening, and the rose-pink Of sun
rise blushing as it kisses the snow, and |
caught sight of his wife shoveling path |
out to the milkman, and then hustled |
back into bed for another nap.-Neae York |
Herald.
Williams, of the Norristown Herald, has
a girl who is working him pair Of slippers
for Christmas. The quilting frames have |
been set up in a hotel ballroom and she is |
toeing them. of in bay window.-N. 7. |
Herald p. + Man. When Those slippers |
came home we found them trife small !
and were compelled to send them to ship |
yard and have them stretched over a |
medium sized monitor. -Norristoaon Her.
aid.
!
The merry jingle of the sleigh bells, the |
sparkle of tile crystal snow in the lambent |
light of the moon, and the contiding crea-
ture that nestles closely to him beneath the |
buffalo robes, tenderly clasping his left
hand in hers while his right holds the reins,
constitute the winter nights poem that is |
floating through the doting lovers soul
and leaves him in doubt whether to let go |
long enough to get his handkerchief out or |
draw his coat sleeve across his nose.-
BrookZyn Argus.
A pretty widow, whose husband has been
dead several years, received beautiful |
bouquet the other day. The man who
sent it had been flying around her with an
earnestness worthy of dry goods clerk,
and it was with an extra delight he saw |
her pass the store that evening with the |
bouquet of flowers in her hand. " I am SO
pleased to see ron with them,n said he,
and a thousand little Cupids dimpled in his
smile. 8. Yes" she replied lit is very
kind of you. always knew you liked
him and | am taking them to his grave. -