The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1877-08-30
All Sorts of Paragraphs.


- Slaves of the ring-engaged maid
ems.
ALI men are not homeless, but some
men are home less than others.
What kind of robbery is not dam
gerous? A safe robbery, of course.
= A moral in the style of Seneca: 1t
is better to do the idlest thing in the
world than to sit idle for half an hour.
--I am busy blowing, and cannot en-
tertain company" was the substance of a
note sent by Michigan belle in reply to
an intimation that q; a;gentleman desired
to see her.
= Whiskey is sold in Rome which will
enable blind man to see sea-serpent
200 feet long, in the middle of g. twenty
acre lot of dry sand, and yet people COM
plain of dull times.
"A medical journal gives the anti
dotes to a number of poisons, and adds:
''These remedies must be given before
the doctor comes" By all means. Give
the patient at least one chance for his
life.
"My brains are on tirew exclaimed
an excited lady to her husband. "Well,
my DEAR" said the unfeeling man, taking
revolver from drawer, 'just hold
still a moment, and I will blow them
out
"What are you doing-kicking the
old clock all to pieces 2" exclaimed
Chicago wife. "Blamed if am going
to have anything around me that
strikes !" yelled the man, as he gave it
final lift into the street.
= Scene at seaside hotel: Lean, lank
stranger-"Why, look here, you charge
me in my bill for counterpart, $3.50.
Why, the mosquitoes ate up that coun-
terpane, and why should I be charged
with it?" Hotel keeper-"Of course
you should. If you had been nice and
fat the mosquitoes would have tackled
you and let my counterpane aloneW:
A buxom looking woman entered a
dry goods store not long since, and asked
the "gentlemanly" clerk to look at his
calicoes. 'sWhat prints will you look
at ?" inquired the clerk. 81 don't want
to look at no prince" said the young
lady. II had rather see free-born
American citizen than all the foreign
princes you, can bring out" The 'gen.
tlemanly" clerk looked red in the face,
| choked little, and apologetically asked
what kind of calico be should show her.
The London Times says that VIM.
Gale, an English pedestrian, recently at
Cardiff completed the extraordinary feat
of walking four thousand quarter miles
in .oonsecntive ten minutes, commencing
each quarter mile at the commencement
| of every, ten minutes. Although evil
IDENTIFY fatigued he walked the last quar-
ter of mile but one in three minutes
and the last five minutes. Thousands of
persons were present, and Gale was
| loudly cheered at the close. Medical
men have examined him daily and re-
port that he has diminished little in
weight. He is "backed" to perform the
same feat in London.
- The new convention between Great
Britain and Egypt for the suppression of
the slave trade prohibits the export or
import of negro slaves. Egyptian slave
| traders will be tried by court-martial as
assassins, aud foreigners will be handed
over to their own tribunals. British
cruisers are authorized to capture slavers
hoisting the Egyptian flag. The khedive
engages to abolish all privatettr traffic in
slaves in Egypt within seven years, and
within ~ years in Soudan and the from
tier provinces.
The reports of the famine in India
grow worse every day, and are already
appalling. The loss of life is even now
estimated at half million, and great ad.
ditions to the death list is only too GER
tain, while the pestilence which almost
invariably follows in famine's track will
doubtless largely swell the total. Apub-
lie meeting at Madras appeals to private
charity in Great Britain for help, and the
government is at last, and with apparent
" inexcusable delay, waking up to a re-
alization of the situation.
~ The Chinese merchants of San
Francisco are reported as suggesting to
Senator Morton head-tax Of 500 upon
all Chinese arriving in this country, to
be applied to the transportation homeward
of such of their countrymen as wish to
return. They also propose to get the
steamship companies to charge doub BILE
the passage-money toward America that
they do from it. If these men represent
the so-called Chinese companies, they
mean business, and will suspend the
Chinese immigration and eventually ship
home the whole Chinese population.
Senator Morton agreed to help this
scheme by introducing the requisite leg
islation in Congress.
- The "working.men's party" move.
ment is developing rapidly: Meetings
were held in its interest on Saturday at
Philadelphia, Columbus and Cincinnati,
at each of which resolutions were passed
in favor of organizing new party. The
Cincinnati meeting went on to nominate
a full State ticket, headed by L. II. Bond
of that city for Governor, with Cleve-
land German for Lieutenant Governor,
and Cincinnati negro for school com.
missioner. The Republicans think, and
with apparent reason, that this move
ment will hurt the Democrats more than
them, and 80 counteract the damage done
by Judge Vests demagogical speech,
which has alarmed good many conserv-
alive men of property, as well as the Just
started anti-Hayes movement. The
leaders of this latter claim that it will
take $4,000 voters from the Republican
ticket, mostly in the Western Reserve,
but, demoralized as the Ohio people ap-
pear to be, it seems hardly possible that
an.ex-congressioual salary-grabber and
lot of disappointed office.seekers can
muster 5000 men to but their heads
against the stone wall Of events.
The fight in the Virginia Demo-
cratic Convention last week was an in
teresting and important one, and the re-
suit is, on the whole, an occasion for re-
;o;c;no The success of Malone on his