The crisis. (Chillicothe, Livingston Co., Mo.) 1877-1878, 1877-11-15
MONKEYS TO ORDER.
The OrthOgraphy Of n Merchant Prince
that Troubled n Sea Captain.

that Troubled Sea Captain.
Correspondence of the Hartford Times.
An American Consular officer, il
Washington on leave of absence, relate
n very funny occurrence which came un
der his observation during his official re
sidence in Liverpool. A successful ant
very wealthy shipowner, having given
more time to money-making than to the
cultivation of the intellect, was consider
ed by his business associates little
"of" in his photography and kindred
trifles. He may have believed, will
Dogbery, that reading and writing came
by nature, and consequently lost no time
in the pursuit of such wildand visionary
objects. He sent an order to Bombay
to meet there one of his ships, which
had sailed from Liverpool some time
previously, such order telling what kind
of cargo was best adapted to the present
condition of the market. Among other
things the owner wrote for two monkeys,
which he wanted to present to his
friends; but, departing from the usual
mode of spelling the word two, he put it
too. Perhaps the handwriting was not
very lcgible, as is often the case with
Others than illitcrate shipowners. At
any rate, the master of the ship had it
100, as did also the agents at Bombay.
There was much astonishment at so
strange an order, but the master was
bound to obey it, Accordingly, the SER
vices of n number of natives were Sc
cured, and in few days 100 monkeys
of all colors and previous conditions
were secured. There were little black
monkeys, with eyes like beads, bigger
monkeys with whiskers, and balloons
whose grave expression of countenarce
presented ridiculous contrast to their
uudignifed antics. The whole crowd
scattered, screamed, and fought in the
cage which had been provided for them
in the ship, in spite of all efforts to keep
them quiet. In few days the home
ward voyage was commenced, and with
it the troubles of the crew. As soon as
the motion of the ship was felt, themon-
keeps redoubled their noise, making
regular pandcmoneum of the ship. Re
lays of them shook the bars of the cage
without II moments cessation for twen-
ty-three hours out of each twenty -four,
until the cage was literally shaken to
pieces, and the astonished sailors beheld
cloud of monkeys suddenly issue from
the hold, scrambling, fighting and tum-
bling over each other as if their lives
depended upon getting into the rigging
in the shortest possible time. From that
moment poor Jack had not moments
peace. The monkeys, with mischievous-
ness unparalleled, would steal everything
they could lay their hands on. If clothes
were hung up to dry, they would carly
them up to the highest point attainable
and pick them to pieces. 1t was necest
sary to set guard over everything that
was washed or dried
When the cabin boy swept the deck
he had to lock up the broom, for if he
hid it ever so securely his back would
be scarcely turned before an old ape,
half as big as Il man, would have it, 60
ing through the motion of sweeping the
deck, with an air of indescribable gravi-
ty. As soon as the boy started to re-
cover the broom the old fellow would
drop it and dart up into the rigging
like flash. The cook had to keep the
galley locked while preparing the meals,
and, when he finished them and started
on run for the cabin, he first had to
come out and drive away the monkeys,
who, knowing what was going on inside,
clustered around the door and pcrched
on the roof, ready to snatch, as soon as
the cook appeared, whatever he carried. |
While the men were eating their meals,
they were obliged to lock themselves in
hecabin, so persistentwere the monkeys
in their rogueries, while right over their
heads was n row of grinning heads and
Il chorus of yells, screams and snagls,
and scampering and shuffling as the
monkeys ran backward and forward be |
tween the cabin door and skylight, try
ing to find some mode of entrance. So
great was the annoyance that it was
with the greatest difficulty that the off
GERS could prevent the men shooting
their tormentors, and when the ship
touched at Alden, half of the crew de-
serted, prcferring to take their chances
at this inhospitable place than to endure
the prosecutions of the monkeys,
Finally the ship:reachcd1 1home. She
had been signalled at Lands End. and
the owner was at the dock when she az
rived. Ship owners generally pride
themselves ON the trim appearance of
their ships, and our friend was weak in
this respect, if in no others. What
then was his astontshment at seeing his
ships rigging crowded with knots or
bNnches, with here and there festoon
where several monkeys had suspended
themselves from spar in u string, hold
ing each other by the tail. Everybody
about the docks viewed with wonder the
approaching spectacle. The shipmoved
closely to her berth, and presently her
yardarms neared those of several other
vessels lying at the dock. In an instant
the monkeys leaped from one to the
other, and began tour among the for
est of masts that fringed the harbor of
Liverpool. All the boys and idlers
around the dock were engaged, and a
grand hunt ensued, up and down the
rigging from ship to ship, all over the
harbor. They were finally captured.
The owner was furious, but was, after
while, Modified by an explanation over
n bottle of wine. and the difficulty satis-