The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1877-08-02
OUR STORY TELLER.
A PRACTICAL JOKER.

New York City gentleman, by name
Benjamin Top, who thought there was
nothing in life to equal a good joke. He
owned small store, and kept almost
every article of domestic and agricul-
tural use, and was thereby pretty well
acquainted with all the townspeople, as
they were likewise well acquainted with
him. Mr.. Top had played SO many
pranks on the people around him that
he would have made enemies but for
his constant good humor, and his ability
to soothe the parties he had irritated
almost beyond the power of endurance.
The first of April was Mr.. Tops espe-
cial delight, and that was a smart child
who could enter his store on that day
without being made the victim of some
trick; so that from morn till night of the
first day of April his face was on
broad grin, and it happened that all
those who sought to catch him had the
joke turned on themselves.
A few years ago, as the first of April
approached, our merry friend looked
around to see who would be a fitting
subject for a joke.
I" i must have frst-rate one this
time," said he to himself. "Who shall
it be? Let me think; ah! have it-Dr.
Scroggins; yes; it shall be he. What
shall send-a love letter? No; he looks
too woe-begone for that"
After considering a while, Top drew
the pen and ink near him and wrote as
follows:
DR.. SCRoGGINs-DEAR SIR: Please call
as early as possible at Messrs. s. & B. -,
No.-Wali Street, New York, where you
will hear something to your advantage.
Then folding and directing the letter,
he snapped his fingers with childish de-
light.
"Pll send him to New York on a FOOLS
errand," said he, and have a good laugh
at his expense"
DIR. Scroggins, the subject of this
heartless joke, was a bachelor about
forty years of age; he had been living in
the village only six months, and had
thus far gotten only avery small prac
tice; not that he lacked ability, but he
was awkward in his person, and in hi:
manners not very prepossessing, and be
ing shy and reserved in his disposition
was but little fitted to push his way int
society. He seemed to be very poor, fol
he rented small Office, supplied him
self with the simplest fare, and hi
lounge at night acted as his bed.
The first day of April arose bright anC
clear; DIR. Scroggins, who was an earl.
riser, prepared his simple breakfast, an,
after partaking of it and arranging hi
Office, took his seat to await expecte,
calls for consultation, or to request hi
attention on some suffering invalid. Bu
no such calls were made, and the docto
sighed heavily under the pressure of dis
appointment.
L.,lo~
understand my profession" he said; d" i
not single instance have l failed t
give relief when called to the bed @
suffering. All, me! If 1 only had my
self to care for, would be content t
live on bread and water till 1 could gai
the confidence of the people. But yol
my poor sister, who have already dram
deep of the cup of sorrow, must hav
more added to it. And what can do
Nothingp
The doctor pulled letter out of h
pocket and read:
al would not trouble you, my dea
kind BROTHER" wrote his sister, "knoy
ing, as do, how poor your prospec
are, and how patiently you are trying
wait for practice, did not want so pres
on me and my child. If you can spal
me little-ever so little-it will CON
as blessing, for my extremity is ver
great"
Just as this time the letter-carri,
stopped and handed the doctor lette
he opened and looked at it in perfe
amazement, and read it over the secor
time.
Something to my advantage! VIII
can it beT' said he. "Dear siste
should there be anything good in sto
for me how freely will / share it wi
you and your darling Emma! Sure
the good God has heard and answer
my prayer"
The doctor, who had little preparatic
to make, started for the city, and To
who was on the lookout for him, cou
scarcely hide his exultation at sendil
off an inofensive man who could bare
support himself, on a needless errand
expense and trouble.
The doctor, as he wended his way
the city, was so fully possessed with t
idea that some old relative (for he h
severaD had died and left him fortur
that he had in imagination ma
various dispositions of it before he h
arrived at the end of his journey.
Can | see one of the gentlemen
longing to the frm?'' asked the doct,
entering the store of S. & B.
"There is Mr.. ST." said the individu
addressed, referring him to a midd
aged but benevolent-looking man.
The doctor bowed to S. and said:
My name is DIR. Scroggins."
Mr.. 5. bowed in return, remarking:
will you walk in and take cha
sirT'
Both gentlemen sat down. Abo
Mr.. ;. there was an air of expentant
which the doctor did not fail to mott
My name is DIR. Scroggins," said
repeating his first introduction.
!" am glad to see you, DOCTOR" said n
s., bowling again.
" ] received letter from your hou