Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1877-08-17
Who Saws Girls Can't Cook 2


couple of young lady friends in Easton
few afternoons since, and found them in
entire possession of the house. Father
and mother had gone to the farm iii the
country, and the cook had gone with an
other man up the Delaware to look for
trailing srbutus, with which to trim the
hop-pole.
Those three young people enjoyed
themselves that afternoon to degree
that was positively alarming-to the
neighbors. But alasl the best of fun,
like many other things, is liable to break
in two in the middle, and right in the
midst of their iolity Maud suddenly
whispered to Annie:
"Oh! What in the world will we do
about Ally's supper" You see his name
is Algernon, but they call him "Ally" for
sweet.
"Never mind, Maudy, dear, we'll fix
that. If we can't do any better we can
cook some ham and eggs, anyhow"
The result was that Henry Algernon
was let into the secret that the cook was
away, and the girls didn't know enough
about cooking to disgust cannibal but
were going to try for his sake, and he
dCCOulDdultu JuCuh utMu W buG hllCutns
With an herculean effort he sawed off a
couple of slices of ham about as thick as
board, and left the rind on them, tell
ing the girls his mother always did that
to keep them in shape-the ham-not
the girls.
Maud, without the slightest hesitation,
took down the teapot, measured out a
teaeupful of green and teacupful of
black tea, which she put in together, and
as the kettle was boiling she half filled
the pot with water and set it on the back
part of the stove to draw. Annie went
in the cellar and came back with an air
of confidence, two pounds of butter, a
dozen eggs and pitcher of milk. She
laid them down and said, inquiringly:
"Maud, when cook makes ham with
cream gravy, did you ever notice whether
she puts in the butter and flour or the
sugar and milk frst?"
90 no, Annie; you mix the flour and
milk and sugar and then put the butter
in the pan"
How much butter?"
"Oh, don't know; bout half pound
1 guess"
Annie cut off chunk of butter about
the size of q colts hind-foot and put it il
pan that was already hot on the fire
and while it was melting beautifully she
proceeded to mix up the other things
which in a moment she poured in liber
ally and conscientiously. The pan hes
itated moment, as though it had beer
astonished at something, and then com
menced to foam away in fine style
While the girls wiped the perspiratior
off their faces, Henry Algernon, sitting
on the edge of the kitchen table, said:
"Now, girls, why don't you flop in you
ham?"
"Oh, sure enoughT and each girl
grasping a slice of ham, dropped it grace
fully in the seething pan, the contents o.
which, of course, sloshed over like 1
Fourth July orator, and there went ny
smoke in that kitchen alongside O.
which the smoke of Sodom and GOmor
rah was a ten-for-a-cent cigarette, and i
it had not been that the tea kettle boiled
over just then and put out the confagra
tion there might have been trouble.
When Henry Algernon, Maud and An
ME ventured in from the shelter of tn
grape arbor and looked upon the wrecl
they all mildly sighed.
80 pshaw!" observed Annie, "I dom
care, so don't. can't cook, anyhow
"Never mind, Anniep replied Maud
consolingly. go down in the celia
and get some bread and I'll cook SOM
eggs. Ally, how do you like eggs?"
"Well," remarked Algernon, with tn,
air of an epicure that had graduated in
four-dollar boarding house, "Pm not a
all particular; but if have preference
at all it's for broiled"
Maud looked at him wildly for a sec
ond; but she was not going to be pu
down by any young man who wore
mole with two hairs in for mustache
and she got down the broiler and set
over the Goals to get warm. Then sh
broke six eggs into dish, and, findin
the broiler was so hot she couldn't lift il
|, deliberately trailed the eggs across il
The natural consequence was anOthe
SOdom and Gomorrah and another re
treat to the grape -arbor, while the tea
pot, having boiled itself dry in secon
attempt to come to the rescue, cracke
open, let the damp tea out on the stove
and added a separate and distinct pei
! fGme to the scene that was rather pleas
ant.
Both girls showed strong symptoms @
washing their aprons in their eyes, whe
Algerpon came gallantly to the rescue
saying:
"Here, girls, let's call this a conur
drum and give it up, and go to som
place where we can buy ice-cream an
cake and strawberries without tn
trouble of cooking them"
And those two girls grabbed the smok
ing ham off the fire, as one man, raise
,, up their voices and said:
"Amen. ."-EdStOR Free Press.
Getting a New Dress.