Litchfield enquirer., 1877-05-31
CLIPPINGS.


 they know at five years old, are generally more remarkable at twenty-five for what they don't know, as s a ~
 An orator, declaring that Fortune knocked at every mans door once, an old .1rishman said, "When she knocked at mine I must have been out"
 Richard Grant White casually remark ed that s'he who can write what is worth. the reading, may make siliss own gram , mai" Whereupon the Hawkeye responds: That is which we always did, MT. White
 The reason for day laborer. dropping his tools with such accuracy when the clock strikes twelve, and his rapid speed toward dinner, is that he may make up the time that he will lose in getting back to work.
 In Pennsylvania sheriff is paid fifteen dollars for hanging man, but times are so. hard that It takes mighty smart sher if to make more than one hundred and fifty dollars aweek.-Burlington HasOE- eye.
 The Bridgeport Standard says the Uni ted States army is being rapidly put upon a war footing Two more soldiers have reported for duty at St. Louis, and man in the hospital with a sore leg will be ready for business in less than a fort night.
 "A North Carolina man. has invented a new spark-arrester. just as though the old man yelling down stairs to the girl to come to bed, and asking if that Saphead intends to stay for breakfast, wasn't effec- tive enough.
 B A man may be graduate of the best college in the land, and be capable of rul- ing nations, and yet not know enough to refrain from breaking out into wild and exasperating whistle as soon as he enters an editors office.
 The shr1nkage in the values of Boston leads the Brooklyn Union-Argus to re- mark that "Boston is gradually fading QUO of existence, ,and in the course of time promises to he only mere roadside ham, let."s Aye, aye, butwhat would the play be with this hamlet left out of it?-BO8to's Globe.
 r Justus Schwab and his gang remind us of the canal boat captain who at a town sent his boy out for dollars worth of provisions. The boy brought back nine ty-fve cents worth of Whiskey and Q five cent loaf of 2 bread. HeayensI'a ex- claimed the captain, i"what are you going to do with all that bread?" -fssza1--. .l< :.
 There was one Syracuse man who didn't dare go home att all the other night but slept ont under the trees somewhere He had been on Sunday. railroad ex- cursion, and when the party started home was so gallant in assisting Q handsome young lady on board the cars that he let his wife miss the train, and she had to follow on by the way y-freight.
 ''Oysters unwholesomel" said he, with contemptous sniff, ''I ain't got any pa- tience with these new-fangled idees. >Oys- ters can't hurt nobody. Why, | give 'em to my grandfather-old nan of ninety sir give him dozen raw oysters They wasn't particular fresh. either r-give 'em to him half an hour before he died-:n' they didn'tdo hlm no harm, Oysters. sir, is wholesome" .a4- .s -r..g.l, ere .... ..- e. No CAUSE FOR CoMP1AINr.--He was a -singularly grave man, even for sexton. For nearly half century he had been a, public functiohary-had performed the conspicuous duties of a sexton; yet no
 
 ally he joked, but he did it in such fu- neral manner, that: no one could accnsel Shim of levity.
 One day he was standing on the church steps, wipinR his melancholy features with. 3 red ,bandanaa. A ,hearse stood near and three or four carriages |, were drawn up behind it. The notes of the organ foated out of the windows with solemn effect. A stranger came along and said:
 "Funeral?"
 And the old sexton gravely bowed his head-it was. .la -z
 "Who's dead?"
 The old man again wiped hls brow and gave the name of the deceased.
 "What complaint" asked the inquisi- tive stranger. ~ @t ' tr"'
 Solemnly placing his bandanna in his hat and covering his bald head, the old sexton made answer. =e.f .@ .zt~s.s.
 "Thtre is no complaint;. every body is entirely satisfied. - Worcester Press.
 The Richmond (va.) Enquirer invents the following to symbolize the philosophy of the repudiatjon party in that state. , "Father, are you repudiationist?" ''Yes, my son." ''What is a repudiation- ist?" ''One who doesn't want to pay tue state debt. How did the state get in- to debt, father?" By borrowing money, nay child. " Did the State intend to pay back the money, when: it borrowed it?", Certainly, my son. ," Father, Mir. Jones. the livery man owes you some money for groceries. Yes" Didn't you say the other day that you couldn't get principal or intefastf' -'I believe did, my son. s' $o$h s~Ls kl~~A perhaps MT. Jones is repudiationist.
 That's different. He's a private citi- gen." Oh, sec. fatheri But dOW yon hea debts and not let Mr. Jones repudf ate his?" My son the subject is one you do not understand Here's fifteen cents; run upto Hizzini's and get some ice. cream. sE&38 8G A .S9'L II 3l Trout were presented at the recent meet ing of the San, Francisco academy, of sci. ences which were thrown up from an ar tesian we'll Al feet deep, near Hueneme, Gentura county. The well. which is near 300 feet deep from high water mark, was bored in,1871, and ever since has thrown |, out immense quantities of freshly-spawn- ed fish in April and May. The first fish this year were observed in March. The well is capped. having three tWo-inch ap- eratures, from one of which people were in the habit of filling barrels with water for honsehold purposes h that way the presence of fish were discovered Tn 1872. The cap was removed. and fish were eject ed in incredible quantities until the cap was replaced. The fish are said to be of various sizes, the largest about an inch in length. The nearest stream where fish are found is Santa Paula creek. twenty, five miles from the welL ga &@-
 A Liberty street boarding house keeper has been favored with calls from nearly every tramp who passed her house for |