The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1877-10-06
Yit and Wisdom.

BALDHEADED paragrapher: In Greece
it is known by the way woman wears
her hair whether she is married or not,
In America it is known that man is
married if he doesn't wear any hair at
all.
THE thirsty skeeter folds his languid wings,
Draws in his auger, and no longer sings;
No more artesian wells he tries TO sink
Or comes up to the bar to get drink;
In sleep he waits another seasons sup;
He's comatose; his pump is frizzled upi
-Graphio.
THE life of Brigham Young contains
an example which the rising youth of
this country would do well to initiate.
He was poor young man, and started
with only one wife; but as the result of
frugal, industrious and economical
habits he leaves at his death no less than
nineteen.
To friend who asked Theirs why he
did not cease from such incessant labor,
and take repose in his declining days, he
replied, " As long as God gives me life, /
shall use the faculties he has voucnsafed
me. 1t is only now thatI am old that
appreciate properly the value of time
and knowledge"
The following epigram was written
on MIR. Wildwood, who was very much
given to exaggeration:
"You double each story you tell,
You double each sight that you sec;
Your names double double J.,
Double u double o d."
DIFFERENT ways of putting it. This
is the scientific way If man
falls asleep in the sitting posture with
his mouth open, his jaw drops; Me
tongue not being in contact with the
hard palate, the suctorial space is oblit-
Grated; the soft palate no longeradheres
to the roof of the tongue; and if rcspira-
ton be carried on through the mouth,
the muscular curtain begins to vibrate."
And this is the popular form: " If a
man doesn't keep his mouth shut when
asleep, he will snore."
AN AUTUMN EPIC.
The dog-days linger in the lap of fall;
fog drops down upon the steeples tall
And cliDgs around you like a sticky shawl;
The oozy moisture trickles down the wall,
While ragged, scrawny, hungry gamins crawl
and watch for morsels at the market stall.
One thinks twere better not TO live at all
Than to exist in this perspiring brawl,
When dog-days Iinger in the lap of fall.
LOWELL Courier: Here is conun-
vi uhl WuiCH We uO MOI W udNt
seen in print: Why is pig looking out
of second story window like the moon
Because he looks round. If anybody
triumphantly retorts that the moon does
not always look round, you can reply
that the pig doesn't either
IT is a very high mind to which graft
tude is not painful sensation. If you
wish to please, you will find it wiser to
receive, solicit even favors, than accord
them; for the vanity of the obligator is
always flattered, that of the obligee
rarely.
UNDER THE SHADOW OF ARAFAT.
Here the cradle of the human race
The throne from which Religion has descended;
Here Asia,s hordes their far beginning trace,
And here the races of mankind were blended
Historic ground by every Muse befrended
In classic legend or in sacred story,
There is no spot in all the world extended
So fit TO be the theater of glory.
When nations rush to Armageddon found,
And Cross and Crescent opposite shall blaze,
The oldest landmark on the earth will stand
To steal Promethean fire, and, beacon-crowned
With a fair light from coming better days,
May pass the kindled torch from land to land.
--NcV York Eyening Post.
ELMIRA Adcertiser: The leaves are
turning slowly yellow; their summers
hue is hence; the ripcning fruit is on
the mellow; the small boy on the fence.
He looks around, he views the ground,
and thinks the moment suits; he fills
his pockets full and round, then jumps
the fence and scoots.