, 1877-04-15
1IUAIOR.

A clergyman Of Springfield, Mass, the other da
prayed that the Lord would bless a ccrtail
railway company, ''if it stopped running Snnda
ttains."
A philosopher who went toa church where tn
people came in late said it WAS ''the fashion thcr
for nobody to 60 till everybody got there"
A little girl went with her mother to II Soldcn,
concert When that lady aud the full chorus ap
pearcd, the little girl iu the audience looked a
them moment, then said: Mamma. are thos.
women ready fur bed now:"
Well Observation-Disclosures: "Now, then, yount
man. You ought to be IN school," Small boy
- School: Ugh! there amt no more school fur me
I've passed all nv saminations anu took my degree
room."
The question arising in Sunday school as Il
why God created ali the animals Of the fields, ant
sea, and air before man. no one gave solution To
il, until little boy said: ~ know; ITS because
ue didn't want the man hanging around while H
was making 'em."
A friar, when preaching in a nunnery, observed
to bis female auditors: ''De not too proud that
our blessed Lord paid your sex tile distinguished
honor OF appearing 1rst TO female after the resur
recton for 1t doae that the glad tidings might
spread the sooner"
II you pass through the hen-roost with careful
eye, Just now, you will notice sadness creeping
oyer the coun1enances Of the old hens. 1t is not
thought that they must be sold for speing chickens
after they're .'laid out '~~N
They Ear that one Of the Brattleboro, Vt, con-
Grcgatlons was disturbed the other Sunday during
the momcntsry stiffness following the open prayer
oy voice from the adjoining dwelling exclaimny:
Mary, where's the nnlls!" Som the answer came,
- ln the conec-pot, You fool!''
A sad sweet smile went wandering around a
P,ous congregation In this city last Sunday mor,s-
ing, when the good pastor with tender and solemn
information read, 'Do men gather thorps Of grains,
or thgs Of Gstlcs: And he couldn't for the life OF
him imagine what they were smiling ut.
The new Secretary Of the Navy. having been in
department in New York harbor, innedfateIy e. IT, IT,
ships without delay. Dscipiine @ Is % Giscip,iae.' l
saye the old salt ''if have to ekin every boy in
the navy"
When man jumps out Of bed In the dark at
midnight to fling a boot at an Electoral Commits
sion Of cats in the back yard and p1uces his bare
foot on an etght-cosnered piece OF coal, bis wife
would escape lcaring several pases OF profape his
tory in less than two minutes.
Tommy is fond OF sugar, and asks his mother for
some to eat with his Strawberries. She refuses.
He apoears resigned, but adds, gravely, ''You
There was little boz. and his mother would not
give him any sugar on his strawberries, aud-aud-
and next day be fell into WE'LL"
The Test o Worth-Astist-'' What do yon do in
Se Ses Raes RSRa ss TAs9 aaz o. i s
shust give her dram" Artist. But supposing
that has no eftsets' Donald-'.we shuat ge hcf
that does not dor Donsld-.' Oh, xeh re shast ge
she's no.worth curing. "-Funny Foiks. '~ '.
A fashionable lady was much jncepsed nt the
usher in one Of the churches last Sunday because
le insisted on removing her 1ap-dog from the
sanctuary But the obdurate usher t1iumphantIy
pointed to the printed notice: Persons arc re-
uested to abstain from the use Of tobacco while in
nd In ffrfr h$a {,n& A.