Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1877-06-27
MUCH IN LITTLE.

reason he couldn't drink water was
because it tastes so Of sinners since the
flood.
1t was Connecticut editor who
wrote, I" Is there balm in Gilead 2"
and read next day, "Is there barn in
Guilford ~
Now they are fighting over the
woman-preacher question again. As
if Aaron was any better than Hur, in
the priesthood.
i Lady TO waiter =" Don't put that
ice into the goblet with your fingers"
Waiter" Lor' ma'am, / don't mind
my hands are very warm
1t is pleasant to shake hands with
a girl whose fingers are covered with
diamonds, for you feel that you have
fortune within your very grasp.
The labor Of the body relieves us
from the fatigucs Of the mind and this
it is which forms the happiness Of the
Ipoor la
What this country needs, says one
OF our town ladies, is religion which
will make u man feel that it is just as
cold for his wife to get up and make
q fire as il is for himself.
AN Irish housemai1 boasting OF
her industrious habits, said that she
arose at four, put on the kettle, pre-
pared the breakfast, and made all the
beds before any one in the house was up.
=" Plenty OF milk in your cans this
morning? 2" a customer asked Of the
milkman the other morning. And the
milkman nodded gravely, as with
wink in his eye, he replied "Yes,
chalk FULL
AT the bottom every religion is anti
Christian which makes the form the
thing, the letter the substance Such
materialistic religion in order to be
at all consistent, ought TO maintain
material infallibility.
"A gentleman had occasion to cor
rect his daughter, aged four years.
Aftert was Overland she had satawhile,
she went to her mother and inquired,
Don't you think it would do Papa
good to 90 out doors ?"
80, yes" said an old lady, the
modern cook-stove is great invention;
and when my boy James gets through
his studies in practical engineering, so
he can come home and run.it I'll buy
one of EN-, but not afore."
The conversation turns upon the
fastidiousness of the times. "Why,"
says member, they'll soon say mar.
riage is improper" "No, no" replies
Douglas Jerrold, "theyll always con
slider marriage good breeding"
"A Rhode Island man has written
lecture, entitled "Whom Shall |
Marry ?" 1t is fine work but, so
far as am able to see, holds to the old
opinion that after all there is nothing
better than a woman for q man to
marry.
True religion is always mild, pro-
pitious, humble plays not the truant,
plants no faith in blood nor bears de-
struction on her chariot-wheels but
stoops to polish, succor and redress,
and builds her grandeur on the public
good.
When, in 1854, Jerrold proposed
TO visit Venice, the Austrian Kaiser for
bade. ave have orders not to admit
you into any part OF the Austrian En-
pirc," said the official to whom Jerrold
applied for a passport. "That shows
your weakness, not my strength" said
the applicant.
--"John," inquired a dominic of
hopeful pupil, "what is a nailer?p "a
man who makes nails.n avery good.
Now, what is tailor?" "One who
makes tails was the equally quick
reply. "Oh, you blockheadl" said
the dominic, biting his lips "A man
who makes tails did you ever +" "To
be sure,p quoth hopeful, "if The tailor
didn't put tails to the coats he made,
they would all be jackets" "Eh ?
--ah well, to be sure didn't think
of that"
-All men, especially those who are
young, should be urged to be positive
in their belief. Base not your faith on
Ignorance, but on an intimate acquaint.
ance with the inspired volume. Be
diligent students of the Word. Skep-
ticism has two sources in our day--an
overwecning pride OF intellect, which
disdains TO sit as an humble learner at
the feet of God and superficial knowl-
edge of the Scriptures. These are the
two fountains Of bitterness from which
flow waters that quench no thirst, and
drinking which you will imbbo fever
and delrium.
There are few men who would
pass through gold mine, having full
permission to carry away with them
the very choicest specimens of its
choicest treasures, who would not make
good use Of such an opportunity. All
along the highway of life, God is set.
ting before each traveller opportunities
to be and TO do, which are far more
valuable than the richest treasures of
gold or gems which earth offers These
opportunities are so many open doors
which lead to the treasure houses of
God, prepared for all who seek, and
offered to all who ask.
"A long, lean, lantern,jawed, lop
cared chap, with q slouch hat and q
squeaking voice, entered q saloon and
said Gentlemen, how many OF you
will drink at my expense ?" "I will
was repeated by the crowd in chorus.
"This proves to you, gentlemen, con-
tinued he, putting down nickel for
his own beer, how little can be de-
pended on first expressions. You love
me now, filed with the anticipation OF
good square drink. Your anticipa.
tions will be blasted, and then you
will hate me. Let this be n great
moral lesson TO you
To reach backward and try TO
take what time has carried forever
away from us--this is well because II
shows that dreadful dream has bro
ken but TO reach forward, and, with
a penitcnt, believing heart, seize upon
that which every soul may surely
grasp-this is infinitely better, because
Il indicates the end of all dreams aud
the beginning of-lifc. Now, having
done this, no soul need mourn over
what is lost, because the time for such
mourning has gone by let il rather
90 about the Masters work, conscious
only of the riches that 1T has received