River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1877-06-21

There is no use denying the fact that
we could go through almost anything for
the sake of entertaining our young folks,
and if the following experience does not
prove it we shall be tremendously disap-
pointed. You see we thought some of
our readers would like very much to have
an account of base ball match such as
the insurance and dry goods clerks gen.
orally indulge in (or for what they call
"unprofessional,' and although we did
not know the first thing about the game,
we did not think of allowing anyone else
to write it but just ourselves.
We borrowed big bingham umbrella
for shade, and started out in search of the
ball grounds. We found a game Just
about to commence, ana selected a seat
in the softest grassy knoll anywhere
about. We took out our spectacles, open
ed the umbrella, our ears and eyes just as
wide as possible, and felt pretty sure we
should hear and see everything of the
slightest importance.
The very first thing we heard was a
loud ''hallo ~ from the field. We looked
over our spectacles and saw sixteen arms
reckoning to us, and presently two gen.
tlemen stepped up and explaining that
there was a vacancy in one of the mines,
requested us to fill the position.
Old as we are we have not forgotten
our habit OF opening our mouth very wide
when astonished, and this time our nose
did not get out of the way in time, and
so our spectacles tumbled off.
You have splendid hands for base
ball, sir" continued the gentleman, Z" for
if were ball | should not mind being
caught by you, for there's such a nice
chance to run round in EN-"
Really, sir you're too kind" we said
We didn't know what he was talking
about, but knew he must be compliment
tary; so we wiped and put up our spec
tacles and joined the crowd on the field.
We saw them glance at our hands, and
then they Immediately announced that
we should be the "catch." Why they
should have put us in that difficult, not
to say dangerous, position, we cannot say.
We did not ask at the time, and as we
are not on speaking terms with any of
the party now, we give ourselves the ben
eft of any doubt Some one asked US for
a cent. 1t was thrown up, and the UNI
pire said: "You take the head" Some
body else took the cent.
The umpire then said: How high will
you have it?' and before we could an
swer some one struck us in the stomach,
and the man shouted "One strikel" 1t
seemed to us that it ought TO count for
more than that, for it was hard enough
for six strikes at least Before we had
time to fairly straighten the ball came
again, and we needn't have dumped out of
the way as we did, for the man at the
bat struck it. and turning around with
the widest look of establishment, and
everything else that we ever witnessed,
deliberately SHE'D his club at our shins.
and started for the base. Seven men went
for that ball, while the other ones
jumped up and down, clapping their
hands and shouting, Slinger-in.n
As they rushed after the ball it was our
prayerful wish that the man who pitched
it into us might be killed, but he wasn't
only slightly injured, and took his
place with sort of "do-Or- die" aspect
think of our home and our mother, but
it didn't seem to comfort us very much.
The striker reached his base after a
stormy passage, losing his hat and one
boot, and throwing himself in the arms
of the first baseman with such vehemence
as to make him his enemy for life. AT this
point some one complicated matters by
/ shouting, Look out for the second,
when we had more than we could do to
| look out for number one. The ball came.
/ The batsman missed it and so did we, and
| to make matters worse, that man began
/ to run for his next base. Then we COM
menced to pick up that ball; but il
wouldn't come.
We undertook throw our left toe, at
least four times, and dug our fingers into
/ the dirt, and we waltzed around with our
head between our legs, getting sight OF
/ itnow and then 10 inspire confidence, and
finally stepped upon it; when, after sever
al revolutions in a promiscuous sort OF
way accompanied by few remarks we
did not learn at our mothers knee, we
struck out for the umpire, dived straight
/ into the small of his back, when he, with
the most unearthly yell we ever heard
grasped the batsnran by the hair. and we
all plunged into pile of camp stools and
encouraging cries of "pick it up, home
run, and one to carry, give EN- more
ROOM / say, there, why don't you put
on your specsl' while the more thought
full fastened up and asked us "if there
were any other game We were little sur
er of in some minor points"
The doctor thinks he eau mend our leg
but it now seems as if we shall have to &C
through life with only one eye, and with.
out nearly so much left ear as we ought tc