The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1877-12-06
WHOLE NO. 1889.
Miscellaneous

Glass slippers have been introduced In
Venice. But they won't become popular
here until the Lost art Of darninF stock.
inga Is revived.
A sign on Rochester street reads. 10
seph Amborn." We do not wish 10 deny
tho assertion, bot We object 10 the gram.
mar Of a.
But for the steam engines IN America
there would be work for 100000 more
men. II makes Lucy stones hair stand
right up 10 think Of h.
A man at Calias. Maine. has lived sixty.
seven days on bran and water This
proves that Dio Lewis ia not the only
trstclaas fool In America.
A New York editor heads an article
"What we drink AZ he names nothing
but water, We suspect he has been refused
trust at the beer saloons.
Some one suggests that the Londonou
place CleopAtraa needle In Thrcadnecdle
street But wouldn't u be just proper 10
stick Il In the outskirts.
Nothing unnerves the average small
boy 20 much as 10 ba obliged TO steal
sense the iarring Of the cover sounds
like the crack Of doom.
BY the burning Of Louisville brewery
1000 gallons Of beer was lost IL
will now be In order for some oharitably
disposed person 10 start q relief fund Tor
the Louisville reporters.
Minister Don't you know lie wicked
10 catch fsh on the SabbathT Small
Boy mot having had a nibble all the
morninR), who's caiehin' hah 2
Russian to Turk. who received a bay.
onet thrust But, my poor Turk. you
don't seem 10 object" Turk "its tho
first time in eight days that anything
has gone into my stomach.
A little girl was teaching her brother
the Lords Prayer. the other night and
when she had said, Give "a this day our
daily bread. he suddenly cried out
Pray for sirup. too. sisterf
A facetious tramp called At a house the
other day and asked for something 10 cat
lie was 30 thin, he said. that when he
had a pain he couldn't tell whether Il
was a stomach-aehe or a back ache.
A Fronchman thinks the English Ian.
guHge Is very tough. "Dero y look out"
he says, which is 10 put out your head
and see and look out, which IL 10 haul
in your head and not for 10 ace-iuat
IL Is estimated that there are two thou.
sand four hundred disorders 20 which
the human frame l. liable when a man
is laid up with the rheumatism. he is apt
10 think the entire number has struck
him in concert.
lawyer. returning 10 his Office one
day. said complaeently 10 bis assistant.
Mr. Peetkin. the world looks dihcrant
10 a man when he has three inches Of
rum In him" YES. replied the junior.
and he looks different 10 the world
Never. no. never marry Tor money"
grAvely remarked the pastor TO the
fouth. PA. called out a youngster just
hen from behind the study door. what
10 you marry for. IL 'tain't for money
2 any way. and may bc more, " tho fcl'
er's rich 2
Over in England they are enjoying
themselves Yates. the romancer says
3uchanan Reid has the Itch, and the
,oot Is equally confident that the ro-
nancer has worms. IL is well 10 know
he practical features Of genius.
Little boy. Please. I want tho doctor
o come aud SEQ mother" Servant
Doctors out. Where do YOU come fromY'
little boy what Don't you know met
Why. We dcrl with you We had a baby
rom here last week
Anna Dickinson's objection 10 Butler
raa that he was a widow. 20 widow
Zen must remain. Still Anna shouldn't
% 20 particular. Tor Ia after years she
nay muse:
s.Of an the words of tongue o. psn.
The saddcst are 4 might had bcn.
Maria l. a very popular name In Iili.
.oia. when a cat climbs back fence In
well populated ncighborhood and
lainly calls out "Maria-rr twenty or
hirty windows are thrown up. from
lhich hastily protrude twenty or thirty
smale heads'wildly ansWering. "Whaif'
Tho Emperor William Of Germany will
Celebrate his golden wedding next
pring, 30 get your presents over there
! time Address them plainly, aud
rite the name out In full a. he does
ot like 20 have things come with "Bill'
r "wm." inscribed on them
A book agent, soliciting a subscription
lr n book. showed the prospectus to n
IAN. who. after reading ''si Ia boards.
udSl 2j in sheer" declined subscribing.
s be might not have boards or sheep on
aud when called on fol payment
Ia California a new reporter Ia grndu.
TED wrote Of a citizen who "succumbcd
D the importunities Of the Angel Of
leath aud passed away. lie was at
nco promoted TO write obituary adycr.
and society resolutions-paya
lc In advance. ten cents a line.
A scotch paper says General Grant lost
wo fingers az the battle Of Michigan.
'cs Il was a tough fight. that. bat the
Ieneral never cared n cent for the loss.
le merely remarked, o. he sent a boy
fter the missing fingers: u only take
hrec fingers AZ a drink anyhow
Suooks boy heard him say the other
ay that there were money In hens, aud
.e proceeded 10 investigate the old mans
,oultry yard. lie had gone through a
Iozen fine specimens when the old gent
descended upon him. and the boy nov
gondcrs IL there's a balm In Gilcad.
In the Cafe Mulhouse, Paris, on the
9th OF November. a gentleman played
game Of billiards with his nose lie
,et that he could not miss more than
wenty i've points in a count Of 200: but
10 ran 53O without a miss. And nov VIC
wait tidinFs from the gentleman who
llaycd a game without his nose.
la a Connecticut district school. few
lays since little boy. six years old was
teen 10 whisper. but denied doing 70.
when reproycd BY his teacher He was
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