davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
A WOman's Rebuke OF IL TObac-
cO-CheWer.

The latest and most effective coun.
ter-blast against tobacco was deliver
ed by New York lady in. a Sixth
.gxeppese cur, fecently. One Of the
most noble Specimens of manhood
who chew the weed and with Impair
tial mind distribute saliva upon ev-
erything and everybody within range
was sitting opposite lady. From
his capacious mouth, at regular in
tervals, stream of amber Juice fell
upon her dress. Her look Of blank
amazcment soon gave place to one Of
wrath; frown blacker than mid
night gathered upon her face. Pa
thence ceasing to be IL virtue, she at
last rose, carefully gathered up her
dress so as to lose not drop Of the
fragment liquid, and leaning toward
her uis.a-viS wiped his face with the
garment he had desecrated, and de-
liberately resumed her seat. The
astonished man roared with rage and
pain, vainly tried to wipe the tobac-
co juice from his smarting eyes, and
at last rushed from the car, followed
by roars Of laughter from the passen-
gers.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
CHURCH DIRECTORY.

FlrSr sYrENIAN--Scrviccs on.the I'd
md +th Sabbaths of each month, morning
and evening. Rev. DR.. Lane, Pastor. Sab
bath School every Sunday morning at y o.
clock. Is. Gilmore, Superintendent.
PnlNr Pleasant PRESBYTERIAN CHuRcu.
w. +. Hill, Pastor Preaching lst and
81 S,lbbaths, morning and night. Bible
Glass Mt the Parsonage on Wednesday cv-
cning. Sabbath School, Sunday morning,
NJ. II. Hale, Superintendent.
PlmrgSTANT EwscOPAL CHURCH. Rev. /.
II. lacv, Rector. Services as follows: At
Christ Church, Point Pleasant, every sun
day morning at l0l O'clock, except the I'd
SUNDAY in each month, and every Sunday
evening, 1T G! o'clock, except the Sd Sun
day in each month. Sunday School ut .
O'Clock. T. Stribling, Sup't. Nestry meet
ing on the evening OF the ID Monday in cv-
ery month. Services at Bruce's Chapel ON
the ID Sunday at lOl a. II. Mason City
on the 81 Sunday at % p. NJ. West Col
umbia the ID Sunday at % p. NJ.
NJ. L. CnuRClI--Services on the LIST nni
a Sabbaths OF each month, at lO4 \. NJ,
and u p. NJ, during Summer. PRAYER
meeting every Wednesday evening. L. Ia.
Stewart, Pastor. Sabbath scllOolevery Sun
day morning ut 0 o'clock. d. 5. Snyder,
Superintendent.
N.E CnuRClI SouTH-Scrviccs on the
4th sabbath Of each month. Rev. -
Robinson Pastor. Sabbath School every
Sabbath merning ut y O'Clock. Robert ).
Bickcl, Superintendent.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
RellglOusly Drunk,

Did you ever meet with the man
who gets religiously drunk? There
are not n few of those who "sling the
flowing bowl and drink deep of di-
vinity at the same time, and the
maudlin discussion of sacred things
in which they indulge, like Cassia's
inobriated, I4et us pray" proves ir'
resistible:
Old Noah b. was in his oldage Civ
on to religion. One day his. "old
woman" sent him out TO split wood,
but coming across q brandy bottle, he
returned home vory much ''obfusti-
catcd,' his errand unaccomplished'
Taking seat he commenced with:
Wife wife, do you think the Lord
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
Married Life.

r .al7
.Goodcounsei ftonfa wiieand moth.
er: 81 try to make myself and all
around me agreeable. twill not do
to leave a man tohimselftill he comes
to you, to take no pains to attract
him, or to appear before him with u
long face. 1t is not so difficult as you
think, dear child, to behave to ahus-
band so that he shall remain forever
in some measure a lover. | am an
old woman, but you can still do as
you like; Il word from you at the
time will not fail of its effect; what
need have you to play the suffering
virtue? The tear of loving girl,
says an old book, is like a dewdrop
on rose; but that on the cheek of a
wife is a drop of poison to her hus-
band. Try to appear cheerful and
contented, and your husband will be
so; and when you make him happy,
you will become so, not in appear
ance, but in reality. The skill re-
quired is not so great. Nothing fiat
ters man so much as the happiness
of his wife; he isalways proud ofhim-
self as the source of it. AS soon as
you are cheerful you will be lively
and alert, and every moment will af-
ford you an opportunity to let fall
an agreeable word. Your education,
which gives you an immense .advan-
tage, will greatly assist you, and your
sensibility will become the noblest
gift that nature has bestowed on you
when it shows itself in affectionate
assidulty, and stamps on every ac-
tion soft, kind and tender character
instead of wasting itself in secret re-
pinings."
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
his goodness, Ghic) kin send us

in his goodness, (hic) kin send us
into FIRE .cverlastingH'
No answer from his wife, who was
incensed to find her liege lord in such
u condition.
wife, kin the Lord intend to burn
us in fire everlastin?"
Mrs. B. by this time, was boiling
over with indignation, but still no
answer.
Wife, (hic) so you think the Lord
means (hic) to burn us all (hic} in
fire everlastin?"
This was moro than human patti
ence could endure, and she cohld'not
hold her tongue any longer she'd
speak out if she died for it:
$40! yer old fool, yerl notifhe waits
for you to split the woodP
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

you've got ii all in your % ADS,
after asking Gad 10 bless,
"0h, papa, you are 50 lSk' sald
Phemie, as she watched tll out
Of sight. va
Now, who knows what come
of that? The bread was Upon
the water. witholta thong alat il
mightireturn after many q
Ten years had elapsed, an Aemie
Hilton sat in q shabby. lit room
in New York city, wonderiI Where
she could find bread the me- ny.
The old Squire hadbee dead Years
and before he died he had bee mpt-
cd into a speculation that j f1in:
ed him,and hisEife and dang rhad
come to the city tppafn u read,
There the mothers health bfoks
en- down, and PheAiie was to
-leage het position d a hep
her. Private pupils had fallen of,
and the last dollar was spent. And
now Phemie turned the paper she
had borrowed, in her hand, and
among the long columns Of advertise
ments, saw one for necktie-makers.
"Perhaps l could get work at that
to do at home," she said. willtry;
| am able to do anything with my
needle"
An hour af ter the poor young la
dy found herself climbing up stairs
of a large building in the business
portion of New York, in search OF
the establishment to which the ad-
vertisement directedhsr. Il
awe don't give work out" was the
reply to her question, "and we want
experienced hands"
She was turning away with the lit
tie hope in her breast chilled, when
gentleman, who had been standing
at some distance, advanced and ad-
dressed her:
81 must be mistaken" he said
This is not Miss Hilton, of-m
at is," she said, looking in vain
for familiar feature in the bearded
face before ber. "But you have the
advantage Of me-"
Naturally. You are. not likely to
remember Edward Burr, whom your
father helped so kindly'years ago
But for your encouragement, howet-
er, and his liberal aid, my life would
not have been what it is now, lean
never, never forget either of you.p
"You have .prospered then2 ] am
glad. And this.is your place. Per
haps, then, you will not refuse to
give me work 10 do at home, now,
that we are SO poor" And then
came the story,
Once more Phemie saw the tears
stand in Edwards eyes; as she told
it, and the promise that wor bould
,lae- given was accompanied y v q re-
quest to call Edward was q gentle.
man at heart. Phernie never guess
ed that other necktie. makers would
have opened theireyos in amazemcnt
at the enormous price she received
for her unskillfull performance.
And over her work the girl sat
smiling now; and the mother grew
again; and one brown bearded face
was often in their psrlor, andit was
welcome; and ere many months went
by,happened whichevery intelligent
young lady reader has expected from
the first. Phepie married Edward
Burr, and in their elegant home, the
good old Squire's widow spent her
last days in happiness and comfort.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

It's proof of the singular opera
tion on the human mind, says a men.
tai philosopher, that when two men
accidentally exchange hats, the one
who gets the worst tile is the first to
discover the mistake.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

An Illinoisc minister sent to- city
paper his subject for the Sunday SER
monAthe funeral of Judas Iscariot.
A wit in the newspaper Office added,
"Friends Of the deceased are cordial.
ly invited" The congregation was
probably small.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
The Weekly Register
a rrnllsuEp ErEllS rlfvaspAY ny
GEORGE w. TIPPETT,
7 yFEnfSoR AND PRoPRIToR.
y, eeied upstairs, stortz's Block. Entrance
on Main Street.
-sTerms ,of Subscription. 4
o6ecopy one year, 81: .:fs.s:..,.........,..,l 81 90
One copy five years, -....."...""."r. . 20
hfdriaJly IL .ldrmce.
MS s'of''sabscription.
Advertising Rates.

One square tone incll one weels, - 81 90
if,ach additional insertion, ..,.4....,;.. 80
Fourth nf a Column twelyeinionths, 30 '00
s1lalf Column twelgeJn6Htlis, .,.....,.e, 55 0O
One ColunntWelve months, ...,..st, 80 %
tards not exeeedingseyelllines, lyr. 10 90
sfncli Notices cents & line Tor one in.
ma spsdI and lihiiic notices. "
cents d line'ior each insertiouf but no mo-
tice inserted for less than one dollar.
All advertising for u SHORTER Period than
three months is cOnsidered,transicnt.
All Yearly advertisements. payable hall
yearly in advance.
Transient advertlsemeiiafhiust be paid
dor in advance
Legal publications must be paid for, in
all eases, before the delivery OF the ccrtiti-
eats publication.
Personal communications, and those rec
ommcndhne3eilbns for office, willbc charg-
ed al regular advertising rates.
Marriage and Death notices, not over
. fs.incs, published gratis; all over that
afnaunt Il half advertising rates.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

A subscriber wrote to an editor as
follows: ~ don't want your paper
any longer" The editor replies: ~
wouldn't make it any longer, if you
wished il; its present length suits
me very well.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

If a young man sits up too late
with his sweetheart In Point Pleas.
ant, the old folks como into the par
lor, and, with n refinement Of sar-
casm, invite him TO wait u few min.
utes longer and breakfast will be
ready.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

Truth is immortal; tho sword can
not pierce 1t, fire cannot consume 1t,
prisons cannot incarcerate, famine
cannot starve il.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

A new kind of door hinge has been
invented. Its popularity is that
the door not only shuts quickly and
noiselessly, but it hits the person
who leaves the door opena fierce blow
on his back.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

"When one takes his Sunday after
noon nap, and has an ugly dream"
asks a correspondent, "can you call
it nightmare?" Not exactly; per-
haps it may be more proper TO say
that the dreamer has only u little in
the head.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
COUNTY DIRECTORY.

Judge Circuit Court--IIoN. Jos. SMITH.
Residence Rlvenswood, jackson County.
Clerk Circuit Court-C. b. WAGGENER.
Deputy-JANEs II. UpLLowaY.
Clerk County Court GE.sKIMngRLING.
DcpIpys=IosErm II. HoLLowAY.
President County CouEt-D. Swan MA
TIRE.
Prosecuting Attorney-G. p. SiMrsoY.
SheritI-6DAyIp $. STEVENSON.
Dcputics-I. 2. h. b. SMITH, j. JEwErr
JonN X. DARNEY, tlENRY FRY.
JailOr--J. JEwETl
Surveyor Of l.unds-THos. J. RoREuTS.
Assessor Dist. No. l--JAS, W. WINDoN.
Assessor Dist. No. 2-E. H. BAHER
Sup't Public Schools-CmAs +, HOGG.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

An old Scotch woman recommend
cd a preacher who arrived at the kirk
wet through TO got at once into the
pulpit, "Yc'll be dry enough there"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

The Burlington Hqwkeys tells the
following truthful story in illustra.
tion of the blue glass remedy: "The
other day we watched u sickly look
ing house fly crawling across n south
window. 1t crawled very slowly
and by the time it had gone two in.
ches it was as big as a blue bottle.
It developed into u bumble-bce in
less time than it takes toli-to write
about it: when it got to the middle
Of the pane it was as large as n robin,
and when it reached the sash, it flew
on the centre. table, laid u big double
yolk egg, cacklcd wildly for second,
and then with wild scream dashed
through the window, seized Brah.
ma rooster in its terrible talons and
soaring aloft, disappearing mote on
the broad disc of the sun, was soon
lost to view. Hail, glorious emblem
OF our country; proud bird Of Ameri-
can freedom; thy glori-paragraph
suspended to await the arrival Of tho
affidavit clcrk)
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

Some genius proposes to introduce
paper shirts, But a shirt made out
Of story paper would have to many
tales.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
prNrrn1ENr soc;ET1Es.

MvoNlc-Minturn Lodge No. ~, meets
on the frst and third Tuesdays Of each
month.
ODD FELiows.-Point Pleasant Lodge No.
20, !. o. 0. f., meets every Thursday
night. Hall in Stortz's block
Court Point Pleasant, No, ;, !. O, f.,
meets every Friday evening a o'clock, ut
Capchart's Hall.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

"Remember whom you are talking
to, sir" said and indignant parent to
a refractory boy. 81 am your father.
"Well who's to blame for that? said
the young impertinence, faint me"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

"Tho slumbor Of the pure is sweet"
says the Talmud. That accounts for
sleeping in church, surrounded by
tho nowrest influences.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

Three things the most diflicultare;
to keep n secret, to forget an injury,
and to make good use Of labor.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
CITY DIRECTORY.

Mayor--D, W. PoisliN.
Rccorlcr--M IL, Hale.
Cuuncimcn--C. H. Waggcncr, John W
English, Z. NJ. Cole, W. +, Neale, llenr!
Fry.
City Sergeant. T. Iyplva.
: = S1Ss,sssS aSs.sssS ssf4S.E sef 1HaFlss. ''vf
Street Superintendent. l., Gibbs.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

"0ff she gocs!' said a lady. "You
have mistaken the gender" said tho
gentleman, "this is the mail train"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
PHYSICIANS.
w. NEALE. M. D.

0Aicc s. L. Cur. min and 2Hd Sts; resi-
denre on Main ST., between 9th and Lth.
Attends promptly to all calls, whether day
" night When not professionally engaged
can always be found in his office.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

him. The ring of the doorbell at
midnight may Be his ring; the APP
preaching foot-step may be his foot
step; the unexpected letter with for.
eign postmafks may be from his hand,
He haunts us as the dead never can.
The woman whose husband died last
night may marry again within ahis@
tire of months. Do you suppose q
week passed by when the Woman
whose husband disappeared mysteri-
ously ten years ago does not think of
himY There are moments,when the
opening of a door must startle her.
A veritable sea serpent has been
captured in the harbor Of 0ban, on
the coast of Scotland. II is not an
infant specimen like the one nine
feet in length washed ashore, near
Cape Ann few days ago, but is one
hundred, and ono feet in length by
actual measurement, sand 'eiesen
feet in circumference at the Niickest
part 1t has pair Of sido fms four,
feet wide and a huge dorsal fin oftiye..
feet in heighth, but otherwise is ii
veritable serpent in all itsshape and
confguration. 1t was observed in
the harbor and.a large party Of fish
ermen and inhabitants of the port
went out to capture it. They form
ed line with their boats across the
waters of the harbor and By shots
and splashings frightened it so
thoroughly that it was stranded OH
the beach, where it was killed by the
musket balls ola party Of volunteers.
The body was taken possession under
the hotsam and jetsam rights of the
Crown, and will bc preserved IN the
best manner for the interest Ofscience,
1t is lucky for the reputation of thS
sober inhabitants of 0ban that the
sea serpent was actually captured,
for they might have fought hfm all
day in the harbor, and thousands
have seen him, but without his visi-
BILE body the world would not have
believed their oaths, and would have
set down 0ban as the abode Of liars,
in particular. Even now it will /.
hardly be believed until the sea ser
pent is articulated and set up in the
British museum beside the remains
of the pterodactyl and the megather-
ium, and, in fact, we have been so
often disappointed that the most
trusting would rather see it than
hear tell of it. The facts, however,
are given with all particularly, in
the Glasgow NcWS.-Er.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31

People are beginning to wish for
legislation which shall declare the
tramp an outlaw, and set a price up
on his scalp. The sooner it is had
the quicker will the gold of society
be sphstrvpasf :, ~
.ehiefmaker a tlsieif ans iteqii >,
a murderer. He should be vigorous
ly extirpated.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1877-05-31
TERMS OF COURT.

TERMS OF COURT.
C,pccr Corw-Fhst Monday in April,
and first Monday in October.
CorxrY CouRi,-Third Monday in Janu-
ary; Third Monday in March; Third Mon
day in May; Third Monday in Jubs; Third
Monday in November Third Monday i'll
December.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1877-05-14

licvc there WIS record evidence to fastcn the
crime upon him. A Court OF Inquiry was
convened; Cen WILLIAM r. SuERMAN sat
at the head Of the table listened 90 the tcs-
tinury. and joined in the Judgment. q. q.
UOwNnp WA givcn the benefit, not ~
doubt. hut of II tcchniculty. Neither at the
time uor since does il scrm to have occurred
toSmrHNiAS to apply to This case the princi-
pie thlt "Gn onic.r OF the army must be-
above, doubt"
S.Al more recently. "A Major or Engineers.
living at the White House, was caught GER
t.fyIug to false measurements for the benefit
OF q gong ~ vulgar conspirators against
the Treasury the evidence Of his guilt
was cone lusiVc. But hc went on drawing his
pay as an officer Of the army, and the Gen
cral Of the Army, WHO'S SO jealous Of its rep
Wation when only frontier Indian Fighter
is VA question never opened his lips. Later.
when This same Major of Engineers was in
dlctcd fur furnishing another gang of thieves
with Information useful to them IN ruhblng
the Government, and only escep"d conviction
hy tine skin of his teeth. Cen SHERMAN
remained dumb. other and younger officers
have need under the di~Eraceiul retention
OF OKviLrE +. BABCocK's name on the army
liet But the General OF the Army does rot
seem 10 mind.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1877-05-14
MI. iInycs in New York.

Er HAYES will doubtless feel somewhat
uneasy in this city. the vast majority OF the
people of which regard him as the Fraud
which CHARLES FRANCIS ADsM Ms says hc H.
Whom he shows himself in the streets ne will
realize that three-fourths of all the men and
women al whom hc looks are II Mr.. ApAMs's
opinion When he is in any put lie assem-
blagc, he will know that ne Is among n,cn
who hold that opinion. when lee sits down
b. the Chamber of Commerce dinner he will
feel that there are men Of that opinion
at the table. Wherever he goes. he
will be- unable 10 get rid Of the
impression that that opinion X in
the air. and that il has taken firm hold of
the public thought II is held not only by
Democrats hut by many people who belong
g. the Republican party and 10y men who
voted for him. Though sa,cd from the cN-
pcricnco { being -alutcd 49, y Fraud. mo- .viii
yet 'alilo that the word kept from the lips
If mos ing in the mind.
This will make Mr. Hayes Visit les
agreeable to him than It would have been
under other circumstances mach les
agreeable than IL lac had come herr, as the
lawful President, the fairly elected R,pubn-
can President
Then again. he will be una'lc 20 forgot
that this is tie city of Mr. TILuIS's rosi-
dcnce. We presume dat hc VIII not -,e vi
TILpES, or call upon him: lat he Will bc
sure to think OF him. and the though. n4iI
not escape his mind that the Office ho
occupies was stolen from Mr. TIT
Den. He will recall the statistics ~
Mr. riLphNs popular majority la ihccity.
III the State. AMI IN tho country. aul tliuh
al The Eight to Seven Commission hy which
MI TiLDrS was counted out. IIr cannot
very well keep such thugs out ~ his head
WHOM visiting the city I'm which Mr.. TiLrrN
resides. ON this account also. b.. wi, feet
les satisfied win himself hero than o..
would have f".t under other and better cil-
cuiustancc-.
We presume that Mr.. HAYES will have
nothing to say at the Chamber Of Com
morcc dinner even Trough Lawyer EyARrs
should desire 90 talk" mp the whole evening
VIII -i,o,h Mr. HAYES win boo anxioUs
toDail ,ut APPLAUSE Ltcan TO- Hylou-
risy is d. -Olt of homage that Vie. pn. 60
virtue. according o. koeurrovcNrLp. Lei
him show up thn wr,ne'ulHc-- Of fraud, tAa
FOLLY of penetrating r. and ihrl.-S .,Drol
.akug advantage of H. In r.r .rtlr his
rr"och. tne shorthand writer's wul thou Doe.
milo O. put "chcor4 aLi ausatau' at tl.
tni Of every sentence.
We presume t.ut DAB Leverage stranger
thin wiuc Will hc SIT before Nd HAiL- ar
IT, dinner Even tAr wines a. had bette.
r-cheW. There is danger in tA,iu for hi.u.
They are AIT 10 loosen the tongue. They
ou,u lrad .ucu & -f,lk ont more trIthiully
tMulthrV would ,fIirl wise sneak and g.. -t..