The Red Cloud chief., 1877-11-22
NCNOROCS.

ton OF a certain brand o! whisky whici
he recently sold him The cus;ome
wrote: Il have tried ali sorts Of insec
J poison. and find none equal 70 your oil
Cabine, whisky"
Since the Wifeof-the MAn-,hA.-Sca;
ters-:he Bear addressed the America
Commissioners, she looks with disdAii
upon all the other squa~s- Even Wid
ow-of-the-Man- who 8lovsinto-hisG Gu
to-seeif-it-is-Losde no longer shines II
the wigwam-
Children said the teacher. address
ing the infan, c!ass. Children. do yo'
know you were all born IN sin = please
sir" interrupted a little one. Il wasn't
| Was born IN New Orleans" We'll
that's the same thing" said the teacher
impatiently. Don't interrupt, me an,
more"
A platform crater calls his Lecture
How 10 Gain Wealth" There Are sew
eral ways OF accomplishing this object
One is 10 over issue stock; another l:
10 raise insurance scrip; another Is L
get elected President IF a savings bank
and the fourth is to charge $40 night
for a twenty dollar lecture.
A man noted for his close listed pro
pensities. was showing All old coin 10 q
neighbor. when the latter asked. Where
did you get it," Il dug it out of my
garden" was the reply. lisa pity you
didn't find il in the cemetery" said the
neighbor. why soy" asked the coin
owner. because you could have saved
the hole to be buried in"
A good story is told OF a scapegrace
whom a mentor reminded that his aunt
had paid his debts. and that he should
be more submissive 10 the wishes of his
relative. The young good-for-nothing
did not take much ! eed Of the sermon
but when his creditors were mentioned
he had a real grievance: YES, yes"
he allowed cOolly. my aunt paid my
creditors; but what has she done for
me!"
Are you really happy! and wouldn't
you like To be a bachelor again." asked
a Newark bachelor. the other day, of a
married friend, who espoused a beauti-
full girl only a year ago. Happy" ech-
Oed the benedict; happy" Why. of
course | am happy. and l would I
change back again for all the world.
But, l say. Fred. let me give you a quiet
word Of advice: Don't he a blasted fool
and get married. You hear mey"
There is not" wrote the editor of the
DeadwOOd Daily Champion. "a quieter.
more peaceful, we'll regulated and order
ly community i'm the whole western
country" And then. as the 'flice hoy
entered to say that somebody wanted To
see him. he took his bowie between his
teeth, put a Colts new pattern seven
shooter on the desk in front Of him. and
said: Jim, get out another coffin
plain pine one. this time-and let the
aun of a gun IN"
1t is now announced that THAT Wife
Of Mine" is getting ready TO be followed
by something Better" What can he
than that wife of mineY" said
SwCZzle with a leer at his better half,
rs he read the announcement the other
day. "Well." said Mrs. $. Indignantly,
Il should judge you thought business
cloves and tobacco smoke
were, judging from your and
the perfume you've been bringing home
will you nightly for the past SIX
months"
A farmer being poorly provided with
materials of sustenance for his men, fed
them with pork cooked with the riud
upon it. A young man of the company.
not liking the outer portion Of the food.
was observed by the hOstto be carefully
removing the outside covering, where
upon the latter aid: Young man, We
Eat the rind and all here" To which
he you'll, replied: "All right, old man;
I'm cutting it off for you"
A Snowman travelling with a
anna of scenes from the Bible. met a
and, on learning that he could
'lay the piano, engaged him to play ap-
'rOpriate selections after each picture
It his show that night. The curtain
'Ose, revealing THE Return of the
'rOdigal Son." upon which the player
truck up. "When Johnny Comes March
ng HOme!' The effect produced was
Consider yourself engaged
o travel with me-" said the Snowman.
You drew better than the pictures"
They were what the world calls EN-
and they we're going to visit
ONE Of her relatives thirty miles dis
ant. Two railroads ran to the home of
he latter. and the lovers were undeci.
ed which one TO take. There is a
)ng. dark tunnel on the @ Road,
mt there?' she innocently asked. He
aid there was. And none on the B
neY" she further inquired. He said
here was not. Then let US 90 by way
( the O. Road" she softly murmur-
!. And they went.
Food Medicines.
r.