New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1877-05-02
Letter from an Arkansas setller.


Toe following choice bit of humor ap-
Magazine in 1882 1t is now republished by
request. From the last paragraph of Sam
Stroller's letter, it is safe to infer that Sam
was an original bulldozer:
We have though, it right to give publicity
10 the following very intelligent letter, late
Nv written by a settler to his mother IN S..
Giles, London, on account of the valuable
statistical information it contains:
Catchum's ShalOR on the Titled Red River
Arksnsaw April 1893
Ny DERE MUTHER-Yer mustent wunder
il you havnt herG Of me for sumo tine, but
CRATE CRETE is dumb as Shaxpire sais, and [
was advised to hop my twig and leaf old
iDgland, which indede was very sOrroTfnl,
but now sm thanks gudOess SAT, and in
amerry key. ] ardly no ware myself but
the he'd of this will tel my tail, ham a
so waiter in the far wurst, about n a.mle
this side rundown, and it ad gOn mutch
father ehud av found nothin but son, an
no lite at all. You kuO now the hummeg
grazing Agent tolde me that If peepl c1dnt
liv in Sent G leses amerryEey was capitle 10
dy in; besides ses he if you're not very mere
you can AIDE yure muther in distres. 80
went aborde ship wat was going to Moo
0rlines. I've herd peepel tawk abowt rOdes
~ " Uub TUG EbdEb VI lHo htbdlhuhlek Is b06
very ruffeet evir rode on aud it was
very long and very cold and we had
nothin heat hardly, but we found
ded rat in warter cask witch
the havur was grately increased thare-
by. at last we cam to the arbur at the city
of Moo Orlines witch is all under the bot
tom of the top of the river, and we ad
an ankeriDg to go ashore. l ad no idear
as the RIVERS was SO hi in this country, but
as the assent is 80 very esy didn't fsle it
at al. The moo orlines peepel is odd fshis
and not at all cummun plaics; wen all the
people in the streets is musterd it is pep.
per and sault pOpulashun, thsre is blak
wites an wife blaks, an a sorte of MKT
people called quadrunts because they are
of fore cOlers Olsk an wife blake, an blak
Wites. Has the river is so very hi it is
always hi water, an the muDifold adVan-
tiges of the city dipends on the gudnes of
it's banks, there ia lOks in en- to let the
water out, and keys to kepe it in. Munney
here is very common, an is cald eentse, and
EVERY thing ia eheep in Moo Orines,
S dollar bills bein only worth > dollars.
We went up the river in large bOte like
noise ark only more promiscus. the current
account was aginst US, it don't turn and
turn agen like at putny bridg. and as it
runs alwys won way wunder it don't run
away al,Ogethir Thire is no towns nor
taller shops nor pillisses az expectOrated
there wood be. the wood was all quite
wilde not bit of tame no ware nor no sines
of the blessidniss of civilazsshun Rs iales
and jim shops nor no kitohing gardins nor
fields nor Ouses nor lanes nor alleys nor
gates nothin but alleygatOrs. after CRATE
dale of settlin settled to settle as abuv
ware you will rite to me. These stats is
called the united stats becawse thire mails
and femails all united. There's six of them
wimDin stats. . CarOlinas, Miss Sourry,
Miaaia Ginnx, T.nuaaa
all the rest is mails. / have sene no canDi-
bells and very few ingius besides steam
ingins there quite unhedduosted and don't
empty no tailers. / don't like fammin
mulch but praps / shall wen get used to it,
tho its very ilconvenient at furst. j am
obliged to wsrk very ard and if i have to
chop my one wood much longer i hav de-
termined to cut my stick.
Dere mnther, think / shuld be more
eumfurtable if had few tritels witch you
enid bye me, it yew wud only sci sumtking,
and send me all the bills Particular, and
III be sure to owe it you-namly sum nedils
and thred, and SUM odd buttens, but thems
of little use without you send me sum
shirts, and waisteote, and upper cote, 10
put EN- on, when those tumbles off that's on
when you sends EN-, and cum brads, and
some hammers to drive EN- with, and a
spade an picksx, an a saw, and sum fish
hooks, and gunpowdr, an sum shot, witch
they will be of the grateet oonveniency, if
you can send me gun, lik6wis som stocking,
an shues and other hard wears, only it's no
use to send me auy bank notes, for my
nerest naybOurs is sum ingin wagwams
above 20 miles of ami eudDt get charge
thare, so don't forgit some led and sum built
modes, for some blGk fellers has been fshin
close By jist tStthiu 10 mites an I todnts to
hare a pop at EN- foith tttp 10 all yOre dutifuE
SON SAM. STROLLER.