The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1877-05-18
"Marriage and Marrying"


AT Plymouth NJ. +. church, some time
ago, Rev. d. III. Muller, pastor ofGracc
NJ. E. church, entertained good sized
audience with an interesting lecture
upon the subject of Marriage and Mar
rying." After discussing marriage as
the most sacred relation that God has
given us, out of which all other relations
grow, and its ancient character, togeth-
er with the various usages or ccrcmon-
les, whether brutal or otherwise, by
which the high contracting parties were
united in past centuries, the reverend
gentleman proceeded to deal with the
varied conditions and circumstances un-
der which the martial vows have been
exchanged in the nineteenth century.
lie could not answer the question as to
whether "matchcs arc made in heaven"
but would say that those who pro-
ceed on that theory generally reap ben
cficia results. Marriage is often
brought about, he said, through Won
derfll and unaccountablc providenccs
and condolences. There is tho young
man who enters social gathering of
the sexes as free as the minated bird,
and sixty minutes later he is completely
cnsnarcd in the meshes of the net of
love, while the young woman says
'Amcn' in her heart to that which ngi-
tatcs his. The metaphysician strolling
along thoroughfarc deeply absorbed
in thought is suddenly tripped up by
sight of satin slipper ahead of him and
is shocked by Cupid's arrow, while the
warrior stern and bold, entering the
presence of feminity fair and graceful,
is often made captive for life by the
simple twist of fan. The speaker be-
lieved the majority of marriages were
happy, and that those entering into the
relationship realize that God gives them
the full measure of happiness of time
and life. 1t was true, there were ex-
ceptions, but they were generally where
the ideal had been obtained from dime
novel, and the man who married under
such circumstances deserved to be dis
appointed in his expectation. For re-
alization of the true bliss of the martial
relation, there should be complete and
absolute surrender TO each other with
out reservation, excepting in the moral
obligations and the duty due 10 God.
1t should be remembered by young peo-
pie in the ante-marrying state, that the
warmth, glow and glory of young and
ardent love is the true condition essen
tial in true marriage. The reverend
speaker urged that therefore il was not
right TO sneer at the fancies and delu-
sions of young couple in courtship.
Love. he continued, is not blind, bnt
short-sightcd. The man and woman
who truly love can discover not only ac-
tual, but possible virtues. If married
people would keep the heart and rcla-
tionship undisturbed they must preserve
a mutual trust and mutual recognition
of the ideal eXcellencies. Perfect trust
will always expcl curiosity. Marriage
as perfect life, is the goal of all wO-
men and the highest felicity of all men.
The shadows which hung over the in
stitution, the Rev. Mr.. Muller said,
were the doctrine of ceibacy, the un-
philosophical agitation of woman's
rights, and the refusal of men to marry
upon the ground of its cxpcnsiveness.
lie believed in giving women the priv
ilcgc of the ballot, and the right to cil-
ter upon any profession or any branch
of business she Is capable of, but vet
was conservative enough TO acknowl-
edge that her best and highest nature
is propitiated under more kindly condi-
tions than rough contact with the world.
~ wv "iiN3t' NNpciiSiN tii'SN VI
riagc, no greater question had ever re-
ceived the attention of statesmen or
moralists, and men alone are response
BILE for woman being sought for the
whiteness of her hands, the pink of her
cheek and the impression of her millin-
cry. The speaker regarded the charge
of eXpensivcncss as slur upon mar
riagc and SANDER of women. Dcfcc-
tive female training he considered the
source Of evils arising in marriage, ms
well as the refusal TO cconomizc and
live within the income received In
marrying there is TOO much concealment
TOO much conventionality and cover
ing up Of the real facts as to habits and
motive. People should wed with an
intelligent appreciation of character,
that there may he true confidence, afiec-
ton and esteem. Better domestic rules
should be enforced by parents; then
young men would not have an oppor-
tunity of being made the recipients of @
greater knowledge of the inner work
ings and secrets of the hearts and deer
natures of young girls than is possessed
by their mothers.