Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1877-08-06
HOW TO CATCH A LUNATIC.

cation don aHect the nairatlOh IN the
least.
As in all insane asylums, some Of our
patients were dOcile and tractable, and
had the freedom Of the house and high
walled garden, while others, being vio-
lent and dangerous in their madness,
were confined to their rooms.
Sometimes one Of these last-named
gentlemen would loose, fact which he
Immediately announced by breaking
things generally-upOn which announce
ment the doctor would repair to the
spot at which he was "elevating the an
cient Henry" and advancing upon him,
with steadfast gaze, would fascinate
him, as black snake does catbird,
and march him off TO his room instanter.
The doctors eye was never known to
fail and be impaired such a portion Of
his literally charming qualities to my
fellOw-assistant and myself, that VIC
were able to master any ordinary maniac,
although the doctor himself had to at
tend to the slough customers"
We had one lunatic by the name of
Smith, as toll as Tom Hyer and as
strong as an ostrich, besides being pos
sessed of as strong digestive powers as
th~t interesting bird, rVr he ouCe got
loose and swallowed so many cents that
he ratified when he walked, yet he
showed no injurious effects from the
meal.
lie had broken out of his room two
or three times, but had always gone
back very docilely when any of us made
our appearance.
The asylum had saloon in the GEN.
tire with q door at each end and one
Of these doors requiring fixing once upon
a time, carpenter was engaged upon
il, when in trundled Mr.. Smith and
quietly possessed himself off long. sharp
chisel. When the carpenter looked
around, the mailman gave grin and a
poke of the chisel at him, whereupon
the terrified man Of chips scuttled out
and locked the door-then, while the
enemy was battering away at it, he rush.
ed around and locked the door at the
other end.
Having thus Gagged the ostrich, he
gave the alarm; and /, supposing that
it was an ordinary case which l could
easily control, unlocked the door and en-.
tered boldly, whereupOn he made rush
at me, and l incontently bolted.
The doctor was sent for. He came,
and, after accommodating through the
keyhOle, and ascertaining that the enc
my was at the other end of the room, he
opened the door, and saw at once, thai
his eye would fail him in this emergen
cy.
Here was apparently dilemma. Her,
was certainly a problem. Given: A
crazy individual, strong as a bull, per
fectly uncomfortable, and armed with ;
deadly weapon, Required: How to catcl
him.
To capture him by force was a diff
cult and dangerous undertaking, and t.
starve him out would be tedious affair
But the doctor did not hesitate for /;
moment.
alfred" said he, ego down into tn,
surgery, fill the largest syringe will
HartshOrn, and bring it up"
l caught the idea, rushed down, ant
brought back quart syringe filed will
artshorn-diluted- L didn't wan
to kill the man.
Then the doctor, Jones, and myself
formed an army of invasion. We threv
open the door, and entered in the fol
lowing battle array;
l, being shortest of the three, marche,
first, holding chair in front of me b
the back, so that the legs might kee
off q rush if our pop-gun flashed in tn
pan. Then came Jones, with the syl
inge resting on my shoulder like piec
Of flying artillery.
Finally, in the rear, in the safes
place like all great generals, came DR.. /
The lunatic sat at the other end (
the hall on chair, cycling US keenl
and savagely. Slowly, very slowly, v
advanced toward him. 1t seemed
me that we were seven miles apart, fro
the length of time it took to approaC
him. The nearer we got, the mo
wicked that chisel looked, and the ha
die seemed to increase till it was as lol
as as broomstick. When we got wit
in few feet of him, he jumped up al
sprang at us.
"Fire !" cried the general from Il
rear, and whiz spatterl splash we
the quart of hartshorn right bang in
his cOuntenance down he went like
log-it would have knocked down
battalion, and while he was catchi
his breath we caught him.
SWALLOWING A FARM.-Somebo