Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1877-06-08
MRgDUNDANT GIRLS.n
Chicago Inter-ocean

Chicago Inter-ocean
Mr.. A. Milton Mussef, or, as he
generally calls himself upon his
visiting cards, "Saint Milton Mus
SER" is an elder in the Mormon
church. After long and eventful
experience in the management Of
several wives, st. Musser is prob
ably as competent a man to pass
judgment npon a question of vital
interest to several thousands of un-
married women as any man in the
United States. Mr.. Musser has been
a muzzer, Il father, and husband,
all in one, to more unwedded daugh-
ters, lonely and disconsolate widows,
and unattached children than there
are pillars in the Mormon church.
He has been a multitudinousiy
married man ever since he could
remember, and he never looks upon
a stout but unprotected person of
the opposite sex without longing to
give her home, and to add her to
that happy family which ministers
to the care of his sanity buttons
and the backslidings of his unre-
generate socks. Musser maintains
that women have Just as much right
to enjoy the blessings of marriage
and maternity as men. They have.
If they can fix upon an eligible
party, possessed Of the requisite
amount of ready money, and Crap
pie to him with hoops OF steel, they
have just as good right to become
mothersin Israel as Musser himself.
So long, says Musser, as there is
one redundant marriageable woman
in all the land, it is ungenerous,
ignoble and cruel in man, by the
proscriptive laws he ordains and
enforces, to deny her the inestim-
able pleasure of marriage.
We have every sympathy with
the redundant female, with the
several thousand redundant females,
more or less, who pass their lonely
hours in the perusal Of yellow-tinted
ove-letters, in unrequitted attach
ments for their sisters offspring, or
in ameliorating of the condition of
superhuous lower animals worse off
than themselves +; but what in
thunder, so to speak, can we do
about it?
The majority of mankind fall in
love some twenty or thirty times
between the age of fifteen and
forty, inclusive, and each time
would marry if the girl were will
ing, but the redundant female is
capricious. If she likes fellow
she generally snubs him, and if he
is poor but honest she waits for
another chance.
Mr.. Musser wants our unmarried
surplus female population to come
and enjoy the blessings of marriage
and maternity with him. Some
men have found it difficult to man.
age even one wife but Musser is a
saint, and numbers are nothing to
him. He holds them with his
glittering eye, and when this hon
Ored husband of redundant mar
riageable women, and father of
some fifty to seventy children, en-
ters his happy home, the united
tongues of the redundants are tied ;
all eyes are fastened upon the saint
ly Musser, and twenty-five or thirty
infants engaged in expressing their
vocal opinions upon ivory, india
rubber or corn starch instantly, as
if by magic, turn off the music,
and devote their precious intellccts
to the study Of the Mormon creed.
"Godly marriage" says MusSer,
"plural or single, means healthy,
beautiful offspring, and never
ending companionship." He sings
his siren song thus:
Come fly with me
0'er the deep blue sea,
0 redundant fe-
Male. come with me.
Come Come Comel Comol
Happy we'll be
With cur familee. u
We cannot altogether encourage
Musser. Single, not to speak Of
plural, marriages, do not always
produce healthy and beautiful off
springs We have known the
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