The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1877-04-07
Had a Right TO Laugh.
Detroit Free Press,l

There is a legend affirming that one
day nearly a hundred years ago, the
snow was seven feet deep on the streets
Of Detroit. e4n that day not a woman
was seen down town, but nextday when
the snow had settled a foot or so, they
were abroad as usual. They were out
yesterday, wading through the slush and
Jumping the pools, and II OF them Eel!
!. kersplasll 2 as she passed the Soldiers
Monument. A man standing thlrtyfeet
away began to laugh uproariously. lie
got red in the face, tears came to his
ewes, and his hat fell off as he laughed
and cried out:
"Went right down like a bag OF sand
-siusll a foot deep, starched up TO kill
never saw anybody look SO cheap-ho!
no! hot no"
"Youa are no gentleman, sir" remark
ed a man who had witnessed the mishap.
"Can'thelp that-la! ha! hot laugh
ed the other, bending almost double.
"You haven't the first instincts OF a
gentleman. sir!ss a saatinRsd the other
growing very mad.A
!" knowit, but hoi no! ha ]" screamed
the other. II know just how she felt as
she went down carrying all that style,
and I-ha! hai la =
81 don't see anything so very funny in
it,'' growled the other.
sNo. you don't, but I-in And he hung
to tTe 1amp-post and laughed till his
laos weakened. When he had recovered
his breath lie explained to the crowd:
q II was my wife, you see. She pro-
habIv wanted a pair Of shoe strings q
two cents worth Of silk twist, and it took
her three hours to curl and twist. and
nowder and fix up to coiHe down here
and wade around. Then to fail flat with
I'LL her best duds on, and TO be helped
no by a rag buyer, and to hear the boys
yell out, why, it just takes all the-ho!
hot muscle right liza lla heut OF me
ASAT1sFIED CoNscIENCE.-There are
n great many stories afioat about the
nunefiiiious observance of Sunday in
Scotland but we remember none more
illustrative of the absurdity to which the
custom is carried than the following
which is told by the Count De Medine
Pamar, in his newly published work,
aThe Honeymoon
ri was nc the hotel Of DumbertoD. /
had Just got up and r1ng the bell for
some hot water for shaving. A waiter
answered my call.
81 want some hot water, 1t You please"
said +.
and what do yon want with the hot
waterR'
"Ye Gamma laye the hot water on the
Lords Day for Sic Il thing As shaving
said the water, horror struck at the idea.
I insisted SSgain, bnt with the same
affect.
"Na, ma said he, {. We Gamma have it,
Necessity il the mother Of invention,
'tis said, aud this aroused mine.
thought that iii 4 could arrange the or
der iii such u way that 1t would not
effect his religious scruples, he would
bring If directly. / therefore proposed
slat i should like some toddY, and told
linn III bring me the materials for max
inc it. consisting OF whisky sugar, and
boiling water. These he broRghe with
out the least denlHr. gave him the
whisky, which lie drank, and / used the
not water So conscience was satisfied.
al JUDGE WHO SENTENCED Hrs Own
SON.-It hasn't often happened since |
fle DAYS Of Brntias that d father has satt
In Judgment and passed sentence II one
If Ills sons, The mention of an old
Canadian Judges name III q newspaper
recalls til me this incident In his iife.l
The son was addicted to liquor, and for
drunkenness was sent home 9 Up
per Canada College. at home ne con-
tinuRQ LIS career OF WOtNHiessHesss aMu
ii night. out of sheer drunken folly,
picked Il friends pocket ct his hand
kerchief, and thought 1t would be . rare
piece DIT fun To take also his watch,
Accordingly lie knocked him down,
tied his hands, and deprived him Of his
watch. Tho friend had the humorist
arrested for highway robbery, ard in
due course the young fellow came be-
fore his own father, who sent him CO tie
penitentiary for FIVE years aud CIT his
name ont Of the family Bible. would
like to be able tie say that the young
man reformed. Historical accuracy,
however, eompels me to declare that he
married, was suspected of d railroad
robbery, started q livery stable, and
drank himself to death.-LMuntrea Let
ter In Chicago Times.
IA contributor to d religious column
saws: While we were singing the !
d0x0logy counted sixteen persons
Dutfing on their o~veFcoats. 1t would
have been better had 1 been W~nrshiping
instead of counting, bnt II was al1nest
involuntary aud did net take me more
than ten seconds while those stout
worahipers wrestled with their gar
ments and, wriggiing into them, finally
- 49, &S1~s Ar& se,a ansxA w~s&@4 Il