The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1877-10-05

chances are that it will sink with your
weight, leaving you on the grass, while O
a painted wooden devil springs up out OF
the ground directly in front of YOU, and
grins at your discontinue
II MIR. Baker desired notoriety for him
self and his home he has certainly accom-
plished it. Every day in the week, except
Sunday, his grounds are thronged with
curious visitors. Sometimes there are
1000 there in single day. Each visitor
is obliged to register his name and to paw
o small fee for attendance He is warned
TO keep away from the dwelling house of
the proprietor and from the graperies and
not houses, but is at liberty to enioy all
other parts of the establishment. Stran-
gers were formerly admitted to the hot
houses, but there were thieves among them
who stole fruit, and Mr.. Baker caused to
be printed and prominently displayed the
following characteristic notice:
| seven of those who, by special permission,
| were allowed 10 pass through the grapery on
august 18th were reported as having stolen
| hamburg grapes. The lady in black about fif-
" years OF age, who divided her spoils lust out
fessoha. nat "'v" no" COW " -" ' "a" 'ol MAJ
''rhose who used the Norino Tower as spit
| toon on August 30 must remember tina those
who eXpectorate in private houses cannot ex-
pect-to-rate as gentlemen"
The chief celebrity of the Ridge Hill
Farms is due to the extensive and expen-
slve fetes which the owner has given from
time to time to all sorts of people and on
| all sorts of occasions. He has gathered
| together Senators and Governors, Congress
men and college Presidents, to join him in
raising u monument to the memory of q
hog. He has entertained two or three
hundred ministers of the Gospel and set
them all acting like so many harlequins.
When the Charlestown and Savannah mi
litia companies came North to attend
the Bunker Hill centennial, Mr.. Baker
captured them, carried them off to his
place at Wellesley and feasted them for q
fortnight in the interests of reconciliation.
He has organized tremendous pillow fights
among his guests. He has collected half
of the prominent men in Massachusetts to
celebrate the birthday of heifer calf, or to
attend the funeral of black bear Peo-
pie who enjoy Mr.. Bakers hospitality and
drink his wine are apt to overlook the alb
surdity of the man and of all that he does
in his capacity of human earthquake.
The Boston press treats him with curious
respect.
On these testal occasions Mr.. Baker is
lavish in his expenditure of thought and
money for the establishment of his guests
His wretched dependents are forced to rig
themselves up Enthusiastically, and perform
all sorts of grotesque mummery to amuse
the crowd. His caVerns and grottoes are
inhabited by retainers dressed as demons
serving claret punch to every body who
will drink. The bears perhaps petticoated
nd al, ai,,f nl
is too extravaganza for Mr.. William Emer-
son Bakers taste. Probably no other man
ever dreamed of making a COW yield milk
punch. Mr.. Baker accomplished the mir
acle by attaching to the cows udder a
fifth teat made of rubber. small tube
painted to correspond with the color of
the beast, ran down her hind leg and
thence across the floor and into another
room, where the beverage was pumped in
as fast as needed. Hundreds of visitors
drank the milk punch, and wondered at
the marvel until the secret was discovered
and exposed by a Harvard professor
Mr.. Bakers most recent ambition is to
lend a great anti-dyspeptic movement
which shall sweep the country and revolu.
tionize the art of cooking. He believes that
the most practicable method of accom-
plishing this is to establish college of
cookery, with regular classes, regular cur
riculum, and regular degrees for graduates
For this purpose he is ready to give land
worth from $4,000, to $4,000 in addition
to a handsome cash endowment. The
foundations of his college or Trepho- Phag
ianInstitute as lie callsit are already laid
on his estate by the Charles river and in
the neighborhood of the gorgeous piggery.
To interest the country in the scheme he
planneda Governors fete," for the laying
of the cornerstone, and invited all the
Governors of the States, all the Presidents
and Professor sof Massachusetts colleges,
and host of distinguished persons, includ-
ing Mr.. Hayes.
1t happened that neither Mr.. Hayes nor
any of Governors could find it convenient
to attend, not even Van Zandt of Rhode
Island, on whose presence Mr. Baker has
always hitherto been able to reply. He
captured Lieutenant Governor, however,
an eX-Mayor or two, several eminent di-
vines, and almost the entire Board of AL
dermen of Boston, together with a couple
of thousand of citizens, a number not diff
cult to collect in Massachusetts, on the
strength of free lunch. With so many
guests Mr.. Bakers Governors fete"
passed off with eclat. even though no Gov
ernors graced the occasion. The corner
stone of the Trepho-P hagian Institute was
laid, and as it swung into place at the
sound of a cannon, each of the two thous-
and guests let loose toy balloon.
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