The Morning herald., 1877-11-22
SUNBEAMS.

If bank cannot stand a loan it musa
ventually go down.
"He swore like e savings bank depositor, ="
ays Chicago newspaper.
Never Judge man by the color of the
atch on his pantaloons.
Chicago proverb: "a penny saved takes
rings" To Canada, generally.
Agony personifed-A bachelor editor
tying to prepare an able and judicious arti-
L on the baby show.
A man who went home early the other
norning with black eye remarked that he
ad met his mourning star.
There are 1904 languages spoken, and q
han feels like using all of them when be
Its down on cat.
An exchange asks: "Of what use are
be legs of pair of trousers below the
nee" To roll up on muddy day.
When young lady offers to hem cam
ric handkerchief for rich bachelor, de-
end upon it she means to sew in order that
be may reap.
An experienced boy says he regards hum
er and the schOolmaster's rattan as about
be same thing, as they both make him
oler
A woman's heart is just like litho-
rapher's somewhat is once written on it
annot be rubbed out.
A San Francisco artist has Just succeeded
b getting picture of the race horse Occi-
lent, on full run. 1t must be in fast |
tolors, then.
'Your heart is made of flint" said a
ealous lover to his sweetheart. "Is it?"
he sobbed, "is it I never 'ad-a-man-to say |
Buch thing as that before"
Madisonville (Ky.) man says that one
feason why there are SO many poor horses
Pround there is that people swap so often
fhe horses do not have time to get fat.
Russia has one hundred and thirty-nine
holidays in every year, and the Russian who
Poesnt get drunk on these is supposed to
be in sympathy with the Turks.
/ Stanley discovered the existence of fifteen
billion Ehtiopians heretofore unknown.
Hill some other explorer follow up the
bcent?
Milkmen are so sentimental that when
lou talk to them about the quality of their
Pream you can easily draw water to their
Eyes.
Sunday school class in Wilmington
Fas asked who was the author of the
Psalms. Silence, at first; then a little
nand pan was held up. 'T know" "Who ?"
Sam" Ii
A Kentucky man who went to the Black
dllls wrote back to local paper, saying:
Offer premium at your coming fair for
he biggest fool in the country, and I'll try
md get there in time"
Every woman who marries should have
ONE Idea of cookery; but the truth is that |
nne IN ten who marry cannot tell whether
clcles should be cooked with their jackets
n or not. {
The papers relate an anecdote of beau
1ui young lady, who had become blind, '
avlng recovered her sight after marriage
Is no uncommon thing for peoples eyes
be opened by matrimony II
A lot of Frenchmen, Prussians and Eng T
shmen chiselled their names upon an o
nclent Egyptian tomb, and over them all :,
u indignant savant has engraved, "A list
fools" n
An Oshkosh, Wis, genius solves the re- :,
1mptIon problem. AS gold is only worth
lree percent. premium, letth Government, tt
says, stick three cent postage stamp T
each dollar bill, and the thing is
one.
q! a countryman stepped up to the box 81
hce at McVicker's Theatre, few days #
ice, and asked for two tickets in the front :, =
Nv, lest as near the mattynay as ye kin, -
,lster, for want to see the hull thing "
ticago Journal. it
Inc COWS of Worcester, Massachusetts,,
we formed an association for mutual bene
. We judge so, at least, from the state =,
ent in the local press that there has M
Gently been an Organization of the milk in
oducers." NJ
Friday, at noon, when Broadway near the "a
tor House was crowded with gentlemen,
o Turks dressed in their national costume
'ssed to the west. At the same time =,
young ladies crossed through the mud :"
'he east toward the street cars. The OF
lrks passed unnoticed-M. Y. Herald. a
me daughter of carriage painter at fo
loed ball next door to her fathers shop. ~