The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1877-08-03
Hints for Restaurants.

Itwas popular restaurant.
The seedV customer who had fingered
for half an hour over doughnut revel,
brushed the crumbs off his pantaloons
with his four by six napkin, and
approached the cashier with an abstracted
air As he handed over his dime he
remarked:
" Mister, think you aud could do a
little business"
Chow so7' said the cashier.
Why, / have noticed that the folks
who patronize this hashery seem to go in
mostly for clam m-chowder, and beef, and
doushnuts. They ignore the more
recherche elements of the meal, such as
| quail on toast, and venison steak. You'd
realize more profit if the public partook
more extensively of the luxuries of the
season, so to speak, wouldn't you"
&c reckon" replied the check-taker.
"Have you ever noticed" continued
the seedy customer, that man is an
cumulative being He is guided and gov
erned by public opinion rather than his
own ideas"
Exactly"
Now do you see what / am driving
at? Public opinion, influenced by hard
times; says dotghntits and clam -chowder.
You want to educate public opinion up
to the more elevated stand point of quail
on toast. and venisOn steak"
How are you going to do it?'
"That's Just what | am coming to.
That's where my inventive genius comes
il. You and | put up a job on 'em.
Every day about this time / come here
to dinner. | look over the programme
and yell out, Hero; waiter, turtle soup,
fried oysters T1fe de foi graS, and pint
of Ruderer,' and the waiter he sings out
the order so the whole room full can
hear. The folks thst have Just come in
say to themselves, Hello, this is kind
of stylish place. 1t won't do to eat
baked beans and cOdfish balls here and
then they fellow my example; more
especially if the waiter does his part
well, and can infuse a tone of sarcasm
into his voice when passing along the
order for clam-chowder aud hash, so as
to make the cheap feeders feel their
insgnifcance. Things would soon work
around if some enterprising man would
set the example"
Well" said the cashier, "you, or
anybody else can order just what you
like, providing you pay for It,"
"I'm afraid you hardly appreciate the
importance of my idea. In order to in
augurate the system it will be necessary
to disregard the immediate pecuniary
outlay. Now, my proposition is that L
should officiate as epicurean exemplar.
l will soon rouse the spirit of emulation
by my apparent reckless extravaganza.
l will, by revelihg in the delicacies which
would appease the appetite of Lucul-
lus, stimulate others to like lavish indul-
I ,I,oIl ba ~ OF
ing around me glances OF scOrnful
depreciation at those grovelling souls who
persist in partaking of humble fare.
Here, now, for instance, l assume an air
of lofty disdain. Do you think you
could sit calmly and eat clam soup while
was looking at you-o-and devouriDg
boned turkev?"
"No. should probably get up and
kick you," was the answer.
"Ah, but ff1ost men would take it
differently. They would say, | guess
can afford to eat boned turkey as well
as that fellow and they would order all
the luxuries they could think OF 1t
would catch 'em, tell you. Now, to
come right down to business, | amt am
bilious / don't ask any salary. All that
| | want is to order what | like free gratis,
and I'll set right to work and we'll bring
about tho biggest revolution in public
opinion you ever saw. What do you
say? Is it bargain?" ?"
''I can't see as it would exactly pay
me-" said the restaurant man. " | guess
things have got to work around grad
ually."
You don't seem to have much enter
prise" sadly observed the epicurean
exemplar. "What kind of one-horse
beanery is this, anyhow? You may put
down venison and quail in your lying
programme, and hanged if l believe
you've got any in your old chOwder-
mill. III offer my services to some first
class estab1ishment.-Bos Traveller.