Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-04-28
AN ADVERTISING AGENT.

We thought, from the way he came
into the office and slammed his cane
down on the table, and took the best
char and spat on the stove, and said,
"Wel Gully how does the old thing
work ?" that he was circus agent but
his card showed him to DO modest, un-
pretending advertising agent of y Wis
consin paper He had just came from
Chicago, he sand. We said "Ah ~
not because there was any particular,
original briIiancy in the remark, but
because that is what We generally say,
with n rising accent on the inal syllable,
when u man tells US he has been TO Chi
cago. Had We Il man up there p
"No, we hadn't" "Wrll," he said,
"don't send one there. just waste of
time. I've been there nearly three
weeks, and just club myself every
time think what II fool | was to throw
away SO much time that l nigh have
put somewhere else to advantage"
Didn't he do anything in Chicago ?"
we asked, rather timidly, tor we begun
to see that we were in the presence OF II
master mind.
"Now-w- !" he snarled in the most
contemptuous tone ; "hardly made ex-
penses didn't pay salary. There three
weeks, and only came away with $500
worth OF ads. All cash, of course, aud
that makes it little better, but didn't
pay for all that time. How much Chi
cago advertising are you carrying ?"
We couldn't tell him, indeed, without
consulting the business manager, but we
were confident that the HalckeVe had, at
inside figures, at least 50 or 81 worth OF
live Chicago advertisements. We began
to think what jewel this man must be- ON
the business staff Of II daily paper. "Was
he going to ST. Louis ?" we asked.
lie burst into snort of derisive laugh
ter, for all tho world like the opposition
benches in Congress.
"Been there" he said, "and amt 90
ing back until times pick up little
Deadest place you ever struck in your
life. Nothing doing. just nothing
Why, | was there ten days ten whole
long days--as I'm II truthful man, and
only got-et me see III give you the
figures" and he pulled out his note
book and ran over the leaves and long
columns OF figures Eyes, sir, was in
st. Louis ten days to an hour, and only
got $1,227 80, and 1906 rs | have to
take in trade, and only ~, 1870 cash in nd
vance ads. Don't you send man to ST.
Louis ii yon don't want TO pay his fare
home"
(Which way WAS he going from Bur
lington ?' we asked, deeply impressed.
"Oh out along the line OF Is. and Nj ;"
he said ; "out to Omaha and maybe out
to Lincoln, and up to Des Moines."
Nov, don't go there" we begged
him "don't 60 out that way at all. 1t
wont pay you ut all I; we know this coun-
try, and we know you won't make II cent
on the trip"
"Why not ?" he asked deGantly, and
in rather incredulous tone of counten
ance.
BECAUSE" we said, "the Hawheye
had man out all through that country
one day last week. 1t may seem incred-
ible, but, sir, that man was gone fifteen
minutes, and came back with only S72,-
600 cash ads, "A couple Of National Banks,
six Nebraska farms, Kansas cattle
ranch and the Iowa State Treasury, and
the Captain di.ch arged him for not max
ing his wages. It's ms dead A."
But he was gone, and we heard him
down stairs asking the business manager
if he thought it necessary TO import II
thoroughbred liar to edit his paper. -
Burtington Hdwkcyc.