The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1877-05-12

y
sided Judge would scarcely be the proper
thing"
i Gen. Stoneman, the famous cavalry
officer, is managing large farm in Los
Angeles County, Cal. He says that his
children have four different kpds of
fruit every day in the year, and there
ARE only four days in the 365 that they
cannot 90 out and pluck them.
Hereafter the elegant hotel clerk, in
assigning rooms above the dining
floor, will say to the traveller Your
room is 969, and here is your rope lad
der" Probably the experienced traveller
will answer back: "No matter about it,;
never travel without one"
Round cornered collars will be worn
by gentlemen this season, having super
seeded those with sharp points, and here
after a man will be able to call upon a
girl, to inquire after the health of her
parents, without running the risk of put
ting out one Of her eyes.-NOroich BuL
}etGR. iNH tN- h
Aunt Emily Why, Nellie, don't
your sister and pull her hais?" Nellie
(tch0 doesn't see it," Well, auntie, l saw
you holding Cousin Frank round the
neck quite tightly yesterday, when
mamma was out, and pulling his hair,
and he didn't say anything" s.....
An exchange encouragingly remarks
that the average young man is so unreli-
able that fathers ought to hide their
daughters. What the average young
man is afraid of is not so much that a
father will hide his daughter as that he
will hide the average young man.
Norwich Bulletin.
There are two periods in every mans
life when he feels, deep down in his
heart, that if the earth would open and
swallow him up, it would be a pleasure
to him-one is when he steals upstairs
with his fathers razor to take his first
shave, and the other is his first Sunday
in high hat.
just as the hunter draws bead on
the graceful wild duck, as it breasts the
ripping, green-blue waves, does that
waterfowl invariably observe something
beneath the surface that has been look
ing for many long day, and proceeds
atlonce to business. -I'urners Falls Re.
porter. .1 ..s
One Italian asked another at what
moment the nineteenth century COM
menced. con Jan. 1, $780," was the
reply. Not So" said the first; and
thereupon bet was made. The mutual
friend who was to decide the matter
gave it as his opinion that the century
in question began on Jan. /, 1901, and
that it will terminate on Dec. 81, 1900.
The hobby of a. Boston professor is
to reconstruct the week, giving it only
five days, called Oneday, Twoday, Three
day, Fourday and Godday, or the Sab
bath. The shortening is intended to
make more days of rest, and the change
of name is for the purpose of discarding
those of heather origin. t..
I Hiram Gulick and his wife, residing
at New Germantown, Hunterdon County,
N. D., recently celebrated the seventy
fifth anniversary of their wedding The
couple are aged ninety-seven and nine
ty-four respectively. They entertained
a large number of friends, among whom
were many of their children, grandchil-
dren and grandchildren .....+.
/ nC Legislature VI INCh UCISCH APP
proved an amendment to the law &C to de-
fine and suppress tramps," commanding
that all tramps be arrested, and that the
i committing magistrate shall receive
twenty-five cents and the Constable max.
ing the arrest fifty cents for their serv-
ices. Constables or officers who refuse
to arrest tramps are to be fined ten dol
lars for each offense, the money to 90 to
the poor fund of the districtin which the
officer resides. .s .. ......
"A lady in New York applied to Post
master James, during her husbands alb
sence, for the key to the husbands pri-
vate box, and was refused. Then pro-
posed that Mr.. James should hand her
4 the letters and she would read them in
his presence. Also refused; and she is
now convinced that there is something
wrong in connection with that box, and
will write to the Postmaster-G eneral
about it. ..-.... ...t...
I "A romantic affair in Charlotte, Mich,
recently terminated in very unconven-
tional way. A number of years ago a
man and his wife settled in that neigh
borhood, the wife leaving a rejected adj
hitiSi III I1hSldhN' llC dlSO an W III u
married, and year ago, having lost his
wife, he also came to America and found
that his old love was widow. His old
love revived and he went to see her, but,
instead of the usual sequel of orange
blossoms, he found her grown so homely
that he took the back track and intends
to wed no more.
Here is an English public-school
boys meditation on the subject of econ
ceit": "Conceit is a very bad thing.
Some people are. conceited about their
name, family pedigree, or anything else,
This also is conceit. Women also are
lmostly conceited, also about their hair,
eyes and teeth, and anything else. Con-
hceit is also very bad" The author of
the above gem is as much at home in the
fields of vigorous and picturesque de-
scription as in the regions of the subtle
and metaphysical analysis, as witnesseth
this thrilling episode on "a Shipwreck"
q, Picture to yourselves the poor sailors
and the men, the women and the chill
| dren, also the passengers, clinging tenta-
ctouSly to the masts and the roaring bill
lows!" alaa'.. 'H -I..'.. 7.t.t