The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1877-12-19

was showing AZ the time. A Jaded, melancholy
man OF fifty, barefooted. opened to me- When
he heard nay nom de plume, he looked more de-
tected than before. he let me in-pretty re-
Iactantiy, thought-and after the customary
bacon and beans, black coffee and hot whiskey,
took pipe. This sorrowful man had not
said three words up to this time. Now he spoke
| up and said in the voice OF one who is secretly
Suffering: "You are the fourth-Im a going to
move" THE fourth wbst7'' said /. "The
fourth lltterry man that's been here in twenty
tell me, said 1; who were the others?" "Mr
Lougfellow, Mr.. Emerson, and Mr.. Oliver
Wendell Holmes-dad fetch the lotr'
You can easily believe l was interested.
sIpplicated-three hot whiskeys did the rest
and finally the melancholy miner began. Said
he:
They came here just at dark yesterday even
ing and let them in, of course. Said they
were going to Yosemite. They were rough
lot-but that's nothing-everybody looks rough
that travels afoot. Mr.. Emerson was seedy
little bit of chap-red-headed. Mr.. Holmes
was as fat as a balloon-he weighed as much
as three hundred, and had double chins all the
way down to his stomach. Mr.. Longfellow
was built like prize fighter. His head was
cropped and brstly-like as If he had wig
made OF hair brushes. His nose lay straight
down his faca, like finger with the end joint
Tilted up. They had been drinking-I could
see that And what queer talk they usedl
Mr.. Holmes inspected this cabin, then he took.
me BY the bntton-hole, and says he
Through the deep caves eff thought,
hear voice that sings:
buii9 q s rnee .d.9, more stately mansions,
Says l, II can't sfford il, Mr.. Holmes, and,
moreover, l don't want to- Blamed if
liked 1t pretty well, either, coming from a
stranger, that way. However, starred to get
out my bacon and beans, when Mr. Emerson
came and looked on awhile, and then he takes
me aside by the button-hole and says:
Give me agates for my meat;
Give me canthsrlds to eat;
From air and ocean bring me foods,
From all zones and attitudes.
Says l, "Mr. Emerson, il you'll excuse me-
this aint no hotel" You see it sort of riled me.
II wasn't used to the ways of littsry swells
But went on a-swsating over my work, aud
next comes Mr.. Longfellow and button-holes
me and interrupts me. Says he;
Honor be to Mudjikeewis!
You shall hear how Pau-Puk-Keewis--
But broke in. and says 1, Begging your
pardon, Mr.. Longfellow, if yoa'l be so kind as
to hold your yawp for about five minutes and
let me get this grub ready, you'll do me proud"
Well, sir, after they'd filed up 1 set ont the
jug. Mr.. Holmes looks at it, and then fires up
all of sudden and yells:-
Flash out stream of blood-red wine:
For would drink to other days.
By George, was getting kind of worked up.
don't deny 1t, was getting kind of worked
up. turns to Mr.. Holmes and says /, ''Looky
here, my fat friend, Pm a-runRing this shanty,
and II the court knows herself, you'll take
whisky straight, or You'll 60 dry" Them's the
very words said to him. Now didn't want
to sass such famous lttery people, but you see
they kind OF forced me. There amt nothing
unreasonable bout me; don't mind passel
OF guests a-tread'n on my tail three or four
times, but when it comes to standing on it, it's
different, and if the court knows herself, you'll
take whiskey straight or you'll go dry Well,
between drinks, they'd swell around the cabin
and strike attitudes and spout. Says Mr..
LongfellOw:-
This is the forest primeval.
Says Mr.. EMERSON
Here once the embattled farmers stood.
And fred the shot heard round the world.
Says [: 20, blackguard the premises as
much as you want tot don't cost you cent"
Well, they went on drinking, and went to play
ing cut-throst euchre at ten cents a corner-on
trust. begun to notice some pretty suspicious
things. Mr.. Emerson dealt, looked at his
hand, shook his head, says
am the doubter and the doubt
and calmly punched the hands and went to
shutting for new layout. Says he
They reckon i'll who leave me out;
They know not well the subtle ways
keep. pass and deal again!
Harg'd if he didt 90 ahead and do it, tool
Oh, he was cool one. Well. in about min
ute things were RAINING pretty tight, but of
sudden see by Mr.: EmersOn's eye that he
judged he had 'em. He had already corralled
:wo tricks and each of the others one. SO now
he kind of moved little in his chair and says
tire Of globes and acesl-
Too long the game is playedi
and down he fetched right bower. Mr..
Longtellow smiles as sweet as pie and says:
Thanks, to thee, my worthy friend,
For the lesson thou hast taught
and dog my cats if he didn't down with an
other right bowerl Well sir, up jumps Holmes
war whooping as usual, and says:-
God help them IL the tempest swings
The pine against the palmi
--and wish may go to grass if he didn't
swoop down with another right boweri Emer-
son claps his hand on his bowie, Longfellow
clasps his on his revolver and went under a
bunk. There was going to be trouble; but that
monstrous Holmes rose up, wobbliDg his double
cbias, and says he: "Order, gentlemen; the first
man that draws, I'n lay down on him and
smother himP' All quiet on the Potomac, you
bet you'll
They were pretty how-eome-you-so now,and
they began to blow. Emerson says, THE bull
llest thing ever wrote was Barbara Fretchie. -
Says Longfelow, ut don't begin with my Big
Glow Papers" Says Holmes, "My Thanatop-
SIS lays over 'em both" They mighty near
ended in fight. Then they wished they had
some more company, and Mr.. Emerson pointed
at me and says
Is yonder squalid peasant all
That this proud nursery could breed?
He was a-whetting his bowie on his boot-so
let it pass. Well sir, next they took 1t into
tnelr neads tnat tney W0nld ike some m usc;
SO they made me stand up and sing ''When
Johnny cmoes marching home till dropped
- at thirteen minutes past four this morning
That's what I've been through, my friend,
When / woke at seven they were leaving, thank
goodness, and Mr.. Longfellow had my only
boots on and his own under his arm. Says /:
Hold on there, Evangeline, what are you go
| ing to do with thenlP' He says: "Going 10
make tracks with them because
Lives of great men all remind US
We can make our lives sublime;
And departing, leave behind US
Footprints on the sands Of Time.
As said, Mr.. Twain, you are the fourth In
| twenty-four hour5-and I'm a going to move
ain'r suited to lttery atmosphere
said to the miner, why, my dear sir, these
| were not the gracious singers to whom we pay
homage; these were imposters."
The miner investigated me with a calm eve
| for while then said he, "Ahl impostors were
| they?-are youP' did not pursue the sub
| ject farther; and since then haven't travelled
| on my nom de plume enough to hurt. Such
was the reminiscence L was moved to contrib
| ute, Mr.. Chairman. In my enthusiasm L may
| have exaggerated the details little; but you
/ will easily forgive me that fault. since 1 believe
| tits the first time that ever DETECTED from
perpendicular fact on an occasion like this