The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1877-10-13
BUBBLES.
Fiction has made truth a stranger

Fiction has made truth a stranger.
"A two foot rule--keep your feet dry.
Fighting the Indians has made a warm
Indian Summer.
Cleopatra Needle is now treading its
way to England.
Poker players on steamboats, should
not use the boiler deck.
When does man remind you of a flu
neral? When he's & coughin'
Tho Graphic man says that "the blair
ney stone is the same as the sham rock
-. If YOU call that coffee" said Squib
to his landlady, "you don't know BEANS
If you don't want to be robbed of your
good mama do not have it painted on your
umbrella.
Prof. Hall, who discovered the moons of
Mars, was carpenter before he saw things
on high plane.
The cornucopia and the Texas steer
are Similar-in that one is the horn of
plenty, and the other is plenty of horn.
"A cockpey, speaking of the death of
an octogenarian, remarked that he was
born at Hayti, and died at heighty-two.
What the milkman said when he found
fish in the milk: Good heavens! the
byindle COW has been in sw imm ing again"
When man signs check he should
write his own name; not for publication.
but as guarantee of good faith with the
banker.
This appears to be an soft year with
presidents of savings banks. They are
"oif' to Europe with most of the cash OF
the institutions.
What is the difference between poor
gun and borrowed masquerade costume?
One is fired and doesn't hit and the other
is hired and doesn't fit.
1t has been wisely and witty observed
with as much truth as poetry, that man
glories in his strength and woman in her
hair, while butter glories in both.
Sc File right,'' said an officer to his
company. % Bedad, replied an Irishman,
who stood near sharpening his saw, g it's
my own property, and I'll be after dom as
| please wild it.
We overheard gentleman say, this
morning, that he hoped that - model hus-
band - about which his wife talks so much,
had been burned up with the other models
in the Patent Office.
-" john" said an old gentleman, "can
you cypher in two syllabesr' "Yeth,
thir-and spell in the rule of three all day
long" "Smart boy. Now see if you can
tell what pint Of snow will come to at
one half penny yard
-" II is curious, doctor, that every time
I smoke after dinner have something daz
Zllng in my eyes. What can you do for
that?" Eh?' said the doctor, with a
smile; don't smoke" The patient was
nonplussed. He hadn't thought of that.
Everybody thought it was match,
and so did he, and so did she, but AT a GRO
quet party, she hit her pet corn a whacll
with the mallet that sounded like torpedo.
and he-laughed. "We meet as strangers"
she wrote on her cuff ard showed it to him.
d" Think of me as no more, ;" he whispered,
huskily.
After one of the last operations of Il
| celebrated surgeon, the resident student
stood looking at the two pieces of mortality
! lying on the surgeons table. What are
you doing, Sr?' sharply asked the sur
geon. "l am waiting for you to point out
which piece is to be put to bed and which
is to be buried
The second night after her first hus-
band died she sat by the open chamber
window five hours waiting for the cats to
begin fighting in the back yard. Said she:
g. This thing of going to sleep without a
quarrel of some kind is SC new that can't
stand it. Let me alone till they begin;
then | can doze oft gently"