The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1877-09-12

A deserted baby in Buffalo had peculiar
nose, and detective hunted for somebody
with a nose like the baby's. At length he
met man on the street whose nose was OF
that kind, and who proved to be the chlld's
father. This sort Of nosing around AFTER a
father is new idea in the detective Dusl-
ness, and suggests this moral: Before de-
serting your baby mash its nose dlnerent
shape from your NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Heratd.
A correspondent having inquired Of the
Glasgow Times US to the best way to cure
mule OF the habit OF kicking, the editor re.
plies that about the best way ne knows OF
isis to walk up behind the quadruped, take
him quietly by the hind-leg, and stand him
on his head until he forgets how"
Tn Chambersburg, ILL.,, they fine q man
ten dollars for splitting tobacco on the MOOR
of church, and the rigid enfoi cement OF
this law has driven nearly all the male
church-members to the inconvenlent neces.
sity Of raising one end OF the, cushion ana
splitting on the Burlington Ha0Eeye.
Two young men named Joseph E. John
ston and Fitzhugh Lee are learning the
maehinist trade in the Pennsylvania rail.
road nachine-shops ut Altoona. They are
nephews OF the Confederate officers whose
names they respectively bear.-St. LOUIS
Times.
A countryman recently gazed intently for
a few moments on the sign OF one OF our
popular druggists, which read: ts--s
Pharmacy" and exclaimed, "Well, by
gosh, what does - know about farming
] don't believe he knows as much as set
ting hen" -Kennebec Journal.
at Henderson, KY, the other day, W. II
Lewis declined to qualify as councilman be.
cause. as he candidly ayowed, he uset
money to secure bis election, and he was mol
aware till it was over that his oath OF office
would in any way allude to bribery.
She saw the placard in front Of the book
store, You can get that husband OF mine
for half dollar" and as she passed on she
muttered, ssI have one will sell for hall
that much" IFrom the ito be written)
history Of Amherst. ]-Boston Advertiser.
Cincinnati Saturday Night: Isn't there
danger in fishing?" asked nervous lady,
as she saw her husband depart with fish
pole and pail of minnows. Replied the
husband, g The danger is reduced to min.
now-mum."
General La Due wants this country to
produce its own sugar, and there is no rea-
son why it shouldn't. A country which
can turn out a war-map every two hours IN
the day ought to make sugar for the whole
universe.
Six men paid their subscriptions yester.
day because they contemplated being candi-
dates for Office this fall. We wish all our
subscribers were to be candidates. White
AaA Times.
The Richings Opera Troupe gave Fra Dt.
duoto at Cheyenne the other night. The
boys thought it fine, and the local paper
alluded to the robbers as g road agents. -
Cincinnati Saturday Night.
A Western editor throws up the sponge
with the remark that 6 it doesn't pay to run
q paper in q town where businessmen
read aImanacs and pick their teeth with ths
tail Of a herring III 81
A line OF steamers has been established
between Marseilles (France} and the rivel
Plate South America) 10 convey fresh mea
ton.
a A Laiayet sInd. mule can trot mile ii