Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1877-01-12
The Husband Who was TO Mind the House.

STORY FROM THE MORSE.
Once on time there was a man so surlv
and cross, he never thought his wife did
anything right in the house. So. one even
ing. in haymaking time, he came home,
scolding and showing his teeth and making
dust.
Dear love, don't be so angry; there's a
good man." said his goody; Tomorrow
let's change our work. I'll 90 out with the
mowers and NOW. and you shall mind the
house at home"
=, the husband thought that would do
ve' we'll. lie was quite willing, be said.
So early next morning, his gOOdy took a
scythe over her neck, and went out into the
bayfield, with the mowers, and began to
NOW but the man was to mind the house,
and do the work at home.
First ofall he wanted to churn the butter !;
but when he had churued while. he got
thirsty, and went down to the cellar to tap
barrel of ale. So, just when he had
knocked in the bung, and was putting the
tap into the cask, he heard overhead the
pig come into the kitchen. Then off he ran
up the cellar steps with the tap in his hand,
as fast as he could, to look after the pig
lest it should upset the churn /; but when he
got up, and saw the pig had already
knocked the churn over. and stood there,
routing and grunting amongst the cream
which was running all over the floor, he got
80 wild with rage. that he quite forgot the
ale barrel and ran at the pig as hard as he
could. lie caught it, too. Just as it ran out
OF doors, and gave it such kick that piggy
lay for dead on the spot. Thei all at once
he remembered be had the tap in his hand
but when he got down to the cellar. every
drop of ale had run out of the cask.
Al l.. 4
enough cream left to fill the churn again.
and so he began to churn. for butter they
must have for dinner. When be had churned
bit. he remembered that their milking
COW was still shut up in the pyre, and hadn't
had bit to eat or q drop to drink all the
morning though the sun was high. Then all
at once he thought it was too far to take
her down to the meadow. 50 he'd Just ge.
her up on the house top-for the house,
you must know, was thatched with sods.
and a fine crop of grass was growing there.
Now their house lay close up against a
steep down, and he thought if he laid
plank across to the thatch at the back he'd
easily get the COW up.
But still he couldn't leave the churn, for
there was his little babe crawling about on
the floor, and "if l leave it." he thought,
1.-The child is sure to upset it." 50 he took
the churn on his back and went out with it;
but then he thought he'd better first water
the COW before he turned her out on the
tbatch 30 he took up bucket to draw
water out of the we'll but az he stopped
down at tho wells brink, all the cream ran
out of the churn over his shoulders, and so
down into the we'll.
Now it was near dinner-time, and he
hadn't even got the butter yet; 50 he
thought he'd best boil tine porridge. and filled
the pot with water, and hung it over the
fire. When he had done that, he thought
the COW might perhaps fall off the thatch
and break her legs or her neck. SO he got
up on the house to tie her up. Ono end of
the rope he made fast to tho cows neck,
and the other he slipped down the chimney
and tied round his cows thigh; and he had
to make haste, for the water now began to
boil in the pot. and he had still to grind the
oatmeal.
So be began to grind away; but while be
was hard at it, down fell the COW off the
housetop after all, and as she fell, she drag
ged the man up the chimney by the rope.
There he stuck fast and as for the COW, she
hung half way down the wall, swinging be-
tween heaven and earth. for she could nei-
ther get down nor up.
And now the goody had waited seven
lengths and seven bresdths for her husband
to come and call her home to dinner but new
er call they had. At last she thought
she'd waited long enough, and went home.
But when she got there and saw the COW
hanging in such an ugly place, she ran up
and cut the rope in two with her scythe.
Bat as she did this down came her husband
out OF the chimney and 80 when his old
dame came inside the kitchen. there she
found him standing on his head in the por-
ridge pot.