The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1877-12-18


Republican about the "Raising OF Calves =
but Lydia Thompson can learn fellow all
about ii and good deal Of other agricul-
tural knowledge in one kick.
Right under it is another on Raising
Of Fowls" but every base ball pla1es
knows how 10 do that. So
So We will volunteer a little agi3edI-
turxl information: To "Raise the Devil"
Take kaig Of bust-head whisky and work
it with four good industrious laborers. sub
soil it lively, and then. after the threshing,
comes the highest yield to the acre you,
ever saw.
Just A. soon a. Tennie pared his corns
and healed that of stone bruise, he began
to lecture on "Tramps"
Our young handsome friend. Christ
Burger, Esq, Of Jefferson City, called upon
us last night.-Seddiia Dean Graf.
Now We hope Fritz hasn't changed his
name to Christ. just because he happened
in a strange town.1-Jef City Tribune.
Sh-sh-sh! Tennie. Bend over; let US
whisper in your ear: If he'd told 'en, his
right name in Jefferson they'd cruelty him
in a minute.
Why il it, gentlemen? Nobody writes:
''The handsome and genial Geo. Frame,
Esq, dropped in on us" etc.
Some Of the boys at the public school
were firing q small cannon loaded with
nails at the coIored school children ye<ter.
day afternoon. Deputy Marshal raffe
took the Young cannon away from them.
and swsrrant will probably he issued for
the arrest of some of them to-day.-kan-
sas City Times.
Always the way-always the way. Never
will let the little deans enjoy themselves.
"A reader asks: "Why did Aimee, the
French opera buffer, once wear = ring on
her thumbs?
Because her toes were too small.
One Kentucky farmer appropriates the
yearly products of one acre Of his farm to
the purchase Of reading matter for himself
and family Err.
That's what the old kuss tells the folks
at home. But he trades it of for
bug juice and fills up the aching void with
patent medicine almanacs. Oh, We know.
Talk about whiskey !-whiskey that You
can zee little niggers hoeIng corn in-whis-
key full of snakes, lizards and tar,ntulas-
~hiskey that will make a man murder his
grandmother At FIRST sight, and all that;
but for the pure article of quick-s;ep blue
ruin, just recommend the Quincy whi--
key, which is built up on fish bones and
tied together with hogs bristles. Lisien to
the Osceola Sentinel Democrat:
Sometime since . young man visited
Quincy and partook of considerable alco-
hOl. Upon his return home he was taken
violently i'll. DR.. Stevens, Of Quincy was
summoned and did all in his power to re-
he died in few hours. The Doctor made
a post-mortem examination and found in
his stomach hog bristles and fish-bones.
How they came there IL 4 mystery.
Now that's what We call whiskey.
The envelope system" has been adop-
ted BY the Methodist church "A the mode
Of paying the pastor. That is the best and
most popular mode of "paying the preach
err" and is in vogue in great many pla-
ces.
Yes, it is a right good way. Lets pay
'em all in envelopes. Big Official ones for
Beecher and Talmaee,. and little ones for
the small fry. Won't secondhand envel-
opes do? They're just As good to eat, and
besides they'll have . nutritious postal
stamp on.
The BAzoo "Flea" has flown. We
always thought there vas something snide
about that 6ea. anyhow. 1t had wings.
-Enferprise Monitor.
A flea never Aics-it hops, as it we're. 1t
has teeth, not wings. The latter are for
such cherubs ~ PhlPps.