, 1877-07-15


it, and 1t felt very cold. Hc was surprised anu
scared, and, ping from bed, he said:
.tBy gracious, Maria! therc'sa toad, or snake,
or something under the covers. i toucheo ls
with my fout.'' .-.
Mrs. Pitman gave loud scream, and was out
on the floor In an instant
1. Now don't 70 to holcring and waking up
the nelehbors," said the Judge - You o 20 anu
get Inc broom or something, and we'll 1l1 the
thing mighty quick" T.,
Mrs. pit1nan got the broom and gave it to the
Judge, with the remark that she tclt as IL
snakes we're creeping all up and down her legs
aud back. .
!: o nousense, Marin! Now you turn down the
covers slowly, whilc hold the broom aud bang
it, Put bucket of water alongside tlc bed,
too, SOS we can shove it in md drown it,
Mrs. Pit1nan fixed the bucket and gently re-
moved the covers, The Judge held tue broom or!
watch was revealed, he cracked away three or
four times with his broom. Then he pushed
the thin. of into tho bucket. Then they took
the bucket to the light to Investigate the mat
ter: When the Judge saw what IT was, no
said:
II might have known that just like you
women, to go searching and fusslng about
nothing. Who's going to pay nc Tor that
watch9 It's utterly ruined"
1T was you that made the fuss, not me-"
said Mrs. r. You needn't try to put the
blame off on me-"
40, hush up and 60 to bed. I'm tired Of
hearing YOU blathcr Blame me II i amt going
to get divorce and emigratc."
And the Judge turned in and growlcd at
Maria until he fell asleep.
OUIPS.
When they make hogs head into cheese,
and his tail into souse, they make extremes
meat.
Great landslide yesterday. Henry Clay Dean
fell ,fown the Times olIice stcps.-St. Louis
Journal
Irish Driver: *surc, that's the Custom
House, sor. But it's only the rare nv it you'll
be scci.i5 this side, sor, The fronts behind"
II the Cur lust wishes to perfectly annililatc
the Turks, he should arm his soldiers With
firearms supposed to be empty. ."-IAi1adeE-
pha Bulletin.
AS Gen. TchcrthemoslcmsheadoI WAS leaving
for the wars, lns sweetheart remarked to hin.
iu tears: Though no more behold thee. yet
is thy name 6pcIl.'
The Russians speak feelingly OF the army be-
ing iupcdttl by the taliuyial formations F" OF
the Lower Danube. Ou the Kappahanuock they
used to eali it stuck in the mud.
Blipkins says: II an't much on problems i'll
Euclid, aud don't ear: much about evolution,
but wien man sits nuwD un i buuhlc~bec at 4
picnic can tell lin ltOw long it will tlkc him
to get up just as we'll as any Profcssorat Yale"
Another lav has come and gone, leaving us
MI ulder and wiser, but rs yet no conl1aunica-
tIus have been received indicating that any one
has discovered man who can drink. out OF i
spring without getting the end OF his nose wet.
.-FuAou Times.
The question OF what to do with West Point
graduates is quite generally discussed BY the
Drcss and possibly We can throw no light oil tho
subject; but there il need of an increased force
to combat the savage Colorado beetle in this
yiciuity.-Iion1c .SenfiHd.
A paragraph is going the rounds stating that
the exact spot OF Dur.oyncs surrender is not
known. It is absolutely certain, however, that
when he did surrender lie had the most Woc-
Durgoyne look u[ any man who was present on
that memorable occasion.
When the Grand Duke Alexis arrived at Brest
he received dispatch from hs Royal father ask
i,ig, .uow-is-your-bull-pu :. ll-pup-ovitch!" The Duke
1ciegraphetl: say-le-is-a!l-right-
aski." '''rhcn," said the Car, "Let-the-cross-
in.-of-thc-Danubc proceed
a Western newspaper has improved on the
tiun will be published u this paper unless ac
companicd by the full name OF the writer aud a
IS bill; these are not requested for publication,
but as guarantee Of good faith"
\ rich but parsinonious and very old gentle
man. oil being taken to task for his u1lcharita~
blcncse, sad: s. True, don't give much; but
if sou tnlv knew how it hurts nc when give
ANYTHING, vnu wouldn't wonder anu III hopes
to feel different when | inherit brother Bills
nrOnarty!s1