The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1877-12-25
JOSH BILLINGS PROVERBS.
His Lectures on sandwiches and
specimen Brix" in the Acad-
envy Last Night.
(Philadelphia Times. ]

-. Z. , & = -
The Academy OF Music was fairly filed
last evening by an audience assembled
TO hear Josh Billings { Henry W Shaw
lecture on Sandwiches and. Specimen
Brix," which consisted of extracts from
ibis printed works. The lecturer, with
Ibis spare, bent form, intelligent face
|black mustache, full grey whiskers and
Hong black hair, flowing to his shoulders
appeared all over the typical Y Yankee,
EanR this appearance vas emphasized by
Me qaizzieaf, EanE Pfy glance which lie
lnow and then cast at the audience from
bis bright eyes, as he arranged the stand
in order to obtain The best light on the
book which be drew in a sly manner
| from beneath his coat.
81 do not propose to speak on the lost
arts" he said, s.the rise and decline o.
the Roman Empire, the purchase Of th,
British Islands by Secretary Evarts, the
third term, or the welLsettied fact thai
the eight spot takes the seven. I simply
propose to speak OF every day facts, by
monograms, essays and squibs.. Tht
lAmericap wants his humor caustic, OF
the half-shell, with Cayenne pepper
while the Englishman is satis6ed:to take
bis fun smothered in mint sauce, and wall
till the next day to digest it. II, yot
want to make an American laugh OF
|convince him, you have got to do il
quick. England has more it,anf Amer
lea more humor.." Thelecturer then be,
gan his readings from which the follow.
ing selections are given: 81
This life is game af cards /; we mus,
play the hands dealt 10 us, and the
credit is not so much iu-winning IS in
playing a poor hand we'll" 8.
.When hear a man Dragging about
what he did last year and what he's 60
ing to do rext year,I can tell pretty neal
what he's doing now"
sDont despise your poor relations
They might get rich some time AMI then
1t would be so hard to explain things
"The reputation a man gets from his
ancestors wants about as much altering
to ct him as their clothes would" .
( "There is no woman stationed on the
face of the earth who tries so hard to do
right and fails oftener than the average
mother-in-law." 81
can enthusiast is an individual who
believes about four times as much as be
can prove, and. can prove four times as
much as anybody else will believe"
"Falling in love is like falling down
stairs; It's hard work to find out Just
how the thing was DONE" ~
- man who, has been waiting for the
last fifteen years for something to turn
up Is still in the same business"
"a poodlesis woman's. pet, and j
have seen some I would like to swaE
livings WITH"
@Mice can live anywhere comfortably
but in church; they grow fat very
slowly in a church. This proves that
they can't live on religion any more than
q minister can" III
"The worst tyrant in this world is q
woman who is superior to her husband
and lets everybody know it."
Love Is ike the measles, you cam
have it but once, and the later in life we
have it the tougher it goes with u.s."
"Great thinkers are not apt to be grea,
whistlers. When a man can't think oi
anything he begins to whistle"
sThe man you have to work on farm
for nothing and board himself, just about
earns his wages"
''Neatness, in my opinion, is one o.
the virtues. I have always considered
it twin sister to chastity, but none worh
so hard as q victim of ecstatic neatness
1 have seen neat person who would moi
let weary fly rest long enough on theil
best wall paper to take breath, and who
would chase single cockroach up and
down stairs until his legs were worn of.