davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

THE DELINQUENT CoLoRED Wit
messy esterday an old negro, who
bad been subpgned in the case of Rice,
who was on trial for murder, did not
put in an appearance at the appointed
slime, and an officer was sent after h i'm &.
In about three hours the fellow was
brought into court, and his comical ap-
pearanUe caused n smile to spread over
the audience. He looked for all the
world like a Louisiana Returning Board
struck by lightning. lie was broughtup
to the rail, and, holding his hat in his
hand, stood trembling froln head to foot.
The Court-Can you give an explain
alton Of your absence from this court
room
Witness-'Fore God, Judge, I didn't
get no supenya.
The Court-Did not the Sheriff serve
the papers
Witness Well, &c see, Judge, when
ebber Use been su-pe-nyed dey alters
gu hlt u Dhptl' LIS bllIIb ut Cut' III
reads de paper, but didn't glib it up.
Guess | knows de law on tsu-pe-nyas.
The Court-The law does not require
the subpoena to be delivered
Witne,s-'For de Lord, Judge, l
s'posed it did. Nebber ment no dsre-
spect for the Court Down in Louisiana
de Sheriff always handed me de su-pe-
nya pussonally. Fore de Lord, Judge,
I'm telin' you de trutf.
The Court-What was you doing all
this time?
Witness-Judge, I wouldn't tell lie
for $50. | was playin' poker. had
four queens wild de ace high and SIG
in de pot. | was JUS agoin' to quit
when de Sheriff como in. Fore de
Lord Judge, was jus thinkin' about
comm up.
a general laugh went up, the Judge S
face relaxed into smile, and, after Civ
ing the witness a sharp reprimand, he
let him of without the fne.- Virginia
Chronicle.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

RAPID CoKvERsIoE.- Brother Gard
ner was yesterday white-washing the
back end Of an old house on Catherine
street when the staging gave way and he
had fall of about fifteen feet. He was
senseless when picked up, but man
poured about gallon of water down his
back and brought him to. Mr.. Gardner
thus explained matters to the reporters
" Waal l was up dar, an dar was de
house an dar was de scaffod, and dar we
all was. was jess drawin' dat brush
sroun' to kill when / felt goneness.
Seemed was prancin' aroun' on de air,
wild no chance to dig in my toes"
"sWhy didn't you fall at once, and
have the affair off your mind !" asked a
policeman.
Why didn't I fall why, sab,
was fallin' all de time. / went down
bout fifty feet head fust, an den /
changed and went sideways, and den |
struck on one foot and boat ears. All
dis time was doin' some powerful
thinkin was.
" Did you think Of oysters fried with
crumbs ?" asked the reporter.
"Doan' be talkin' dat way, boy. ]
'membered all my bad deeds while !
was gwine down, an called out dat ]
would live better life ifde shock didn't
kill me-"
In the group was colored mar
whose face frightened at these words
and he softly asked "Brudder Gard
ner, doan' you member de two dollars
you borrowed O. me ?'
81 do"
"Den pay it-han' it over. De shocl
didn't kill you, and now begin on da
better life"
Brudder JONES'" solemny replied
Gardner, "de shock didn't XII M
dead, but befo' l pay out any money
lie gwne to wait dc result of de shocl
to my nervous system. | pears to b'
all right, but possibly | may be fatally
injured in some Of the corners and no
know it for a month. G'long BrudGe
Jones, an doan' rob de cradle an dt
grave. .'-DetfoH Free Press.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

A CHEAP DREss.- Visitors at Stew
arts store, corner of Tenth street and
Broadway are much interested in exam
ining the laces Of the Empress Eugenie,
which are now there on exhibition. The
laces were made especially for the EN-
press at the manutactory in Brussels
The over dress is five and one half feet
in length, with depth in front Of more
than n yard, and is valued at 500, 600.
The shawl is said to have occupied eighty
lace experts a whole year, and to be made
from the fibre of the pineapple. 1t has
the appearance of creamy white silk point
joined together as a groundwork, over
which are scattered numerous varieties of
flowers. The net is very fine, but with a
magnifyng- glass the delicate meshes are
apparent, The flowers are set in after
the mannerof applique, and the whole
shawl bordered with fringe. 1t is valued
at 500, 000.-Ha1per's Bazar.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

MULES NEVER DIE.-In discussion
in the Sazerac Lying Club las: night, a
member asserted that mules never die
He said they took on the semblance of
death, but 1T was n deception. Sometimes
they are turned into newspaper editors
and Roman wrestlers, but they never
cease to exist. He said there is n mulo
used now on a whim on mine in Hum
boldt County that was used as breast
work at the battle of New Orleans, was
owned and ridden by Grantin California,
went all through the war Of the rebellion,
was blown up in nitro glycerine explo-
sion while assisting IN the construction OF
the Central Pacific Railroad, was in the
Indian battle in which Custer was slain
was in st. Louis when the Southern Ho-
tel was burned, and is apretty good mule
yet, with the strength OF it's hind leg on
ly diminished to about the striking pow
er OF a 400 ton steam hammer. dustin,
{ Ner.,) ) RereHe.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

THE RUSSIAN PRIESTHOOD. - The
gambling propensities Of the Russian
priesthood are amuseingly illustrated in
story which is going the rounds OF the
European press. A Russian priest who
loved whist ms well as he loved the cere-
monies of the Church, CHANGED to have n
good hand at trumps, but at the critical
moment OF triumph, the bell rang for
service. 1t was agreed to continue the
game when he came back, and, still
holding the cards, he threw over his
eanonicals and went to the church. Dur
ing the service the cards fell on the floor
below the alter.
Nothing aboshed, the priest turned to
his congregation, and calling on boy,
one Peter Petrovitch, asked him success
sively the names Of several of the cards,
u which Peter very promptly replied
He then asked him the names of the
saints whose portraits adorned the church.
Peter knew them not, and glanced hope
lessly at the priest Then turning to the
congregation the priest exclaimed, "Is it
thus you rear your children, ye genera
tion Of sinners teaching Them 10 play
cards and leaving them in ignorance OF
the lives Of the blessed saints ?" This
quick wit saved his own reputation and
enabled him to return to the card table
and win his game.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

A BUSINESS LOVE AFFAIR.-Alfred
ii. Hedges, young man who seems to
have been paying his attentions to a
young lady. Her name was Tina Mar
guess, lie proposed to her last Septem-
Der, and was duly accepted, being requr-
ed, however to place in the hands OF his
allianced two certain premissory notes for
the sum of 81 800, which he agreed to
forfeit if he did not keep his engagement,
and which, if she broke the engagement,
were to be turned to him. The marriage
was to have taken place in March last,
but did not. Hedges AYERS that his fair
bride has flown to parts unknown, eav-
ing the notes, however, behind, in the
hands of her attorneys, Messrs. Noyes &
Lloyd, to be collected and sent on. The
notes are not due, and he asks that the
attorneys may be restrained from trans
ferring them, and that on the final hear
ing Of the case they may be returned to
him. Cincinnati Gazette.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

An exchange gives the following recipe
for consumption Put dozen of whole
lemons in cold wafer, and boil until soft
(not too soip, roll and squeeze until the
juice is all extracted, sweeten the juice
enough to be palatable, and then drink.
Use rs many as dozen a day. Should
they cause pain or looseness of the bowels
lessen the quantity and use five or six a
day until little better, .hen begin, and
use dozen again. BY that time you will
begin to gain strength and have mn appe-
tite. OF course, as you get better, you
need not use as many. Follow these di-
rections, and we know you never will re-
gret it, if there is any help for you. Only
keep il up faithfully. We know of two
cases where both patients were given up
by the physicians, and were in the last
stage Of consumption, yet both were
lFed by simply using lemon according
TO the directions we have stated. One la
dy in particular was bed ridden and very
bw had tried everything that money
could procure but all in vain; when to
please friend she was finally persuaded
- use the lemons. She began to use
them in February, and in April she
weighed 40 pounds. She is well wo-
man to-day, and likely to live as long as
any of us. 800
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23


The GULF SrREAM.-The "greatriv-
er in the ocean," known as the Gulf
Stream, from the Cult of Mexico to the
Azores, is three thousand miles in length
ana its greatest breadth one hundred
and twenty. At first its speed is four
miles an hour; but this gradually de
clines as It becomes more diffused. In
the State of Florida its temperature is
eighty-three degrees, or nine degrees
above the surrounding waters and off
Newfoundland, in winter, it is twenty
live degrees TO thirty degrees warmer
than the neighborng seas, thus causing
the dense tog of that region. 1t is a
great dispenser of heat, and moisture in
its course. To its influence are oning
the verdure Of the Emerald Isle' and
the mildness of the climate OF Western
Europe compared with countries else
where of corresponding latitude. 1t ar
rests the chilling Arctic icebergs, which
melt away in its tepid waters. 1t is o
a deep indigo blue as long as its cur
rent is deep and narrow and the line
of demarcation between it and the ad
jacent waters is 80 marked that "A yes
SCI. may be seen floating one half in The
Gulf Stream and the other In the common
waters Of the sea and two buckets e
down, one at the bow, the other at The
stern, will draw up water differing II
temperature by no less than thirty de
grees.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23
Arrrp oil Dool,orou,s nav "a nor-

AFTER all, Dockeray's way is per-
haps the wisest. His best-loved daugh-
ter made an imprudent match-in fact,
eloped with the last man in the world
whom her father would have wished
her to marry. For months she burst
not write to him, much less come near
him. But, in casual way, he met her
in the streets of Ware. What" said
the parent to his disobedent child,
whose knees faltered under her, at the
sight OF him "Ha Sukey, is it you?
Come and dine with US Sunday !" then
turning away and again turning back
he added, "and, Sukey, do you hear,
bring your husband with you" This
was all the reproof she ever received
from him.-DetroH Free Press.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

THE other day a man stepped into a
railway car on one of the Burlington
roads and asked for IA corkscrew. Twelve
gentlemen reached down for their pocket
cork persuaders. While they were feel
ing for them he explained that he want
ed to get a cork out of bottle of rheu-
matism liniment, us his wrists were
very painful, and Immediately twelve
gentlemen were surprised and glieved
to discover that they had left their
corkscrews home.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

GOOD CATCHEs.-A Parisicn marriage
Broker recently advertised a number of
lady candidates for matrimony in the
following style: young lady age 20;
fortune, 100000 francs" " Widow,
without children age 26; fortune, 100,
600 francs" widow well preserved ;
age 80; does not look more than %
no false hair; has preserved all her teeth;
plays the piano sufficiently for dancing;
temper quick, but heart good slight
moustache fortune, 100000 francs and
an uncle paraIyzed on one side, whose
doctor only gives him three months to
liye,r
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

REDFIELD, the Cincinnati Commer-
cfaPS Southern correspondent, is a tee
totaler. He says that during his trav-
els in the South he is invited at least
l5O times a year to take drink -
lie always firmly, but politely begs to
be excused, giving as his reason that
he never INDUCES in sprituous or malt
liquors, and he describes IN very
amusing manner the effect of this an
nouneement upon the average Southern
gentleman. First, he looks at the cor
respondents feet, then slowly raises his
eyes, taking in by degrees his whole
person, until he reaches the top of his
head. Then his eyes arc slowly depress-
ed, and he says, in tone of great as
tonishmont, F" Well, III be id I"
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23
Children.

A complete substitute for Castor Oil, with
out its unpleasant taste or recoil in the throat
Tho result of twenty years practice by Dr.
Sam'l Pitcher. OF MASSACHUSETTS.
Pitchers Castoria is particularly recon-
mcnded for children. 1t destroys worms, as
similates the food, and allows natural sleep.
Very eilicacious in Group and for children
Teething. For Colds, Feverishness, Disord-
ers OF the Bowels, and Stomach Complaints,
nothing is so effective. 1t is as pleasant to
take as honey, costs but 30 cents, and can he
had of any Druggist.
This is one of many testimonials
1874. 49,
" Dear Sir,-l have used your CAsroRIA in
my practice for some time | take great pleas
ure III recommending it to the profession as
safe, reliable, and agreeable medicine. 1t il
particularly adapted to children where thu
| repugnant taste of Castor Oil renders it so diff
hcult to administer H. A. ENDERS, NJ. D.
Mothers who try Castoria will find that they
can sleep nights and that their babies will b.
healthy
j. B. ROSE & Co. New York.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

ALL the descendants who take any
interest in the fact that their foretathers
drove teams and filed the place of sut-
lers in the Revolutionary war will soon
begin to talk celebration.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

In Maine boy who killed his father,
recently, has been sent to prison for
six years. At this rate a boy can't af-
ford to kill more than five or six fathers
before he is too old To have II father.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

DEACON JONES, deceased had very
red nose. His widow thought it rather
personal in the minister to begin bis
funeral discourse "Another shining
light has been taken from our cohgre-
CATION"
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

ALL the world is a stage and most Of
the passengers are obliged to go on foot
mp the hills, and to pry the wheels out OF
the mud. The stage is generally stuck
in the mud, when it is not going up hill
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

AN improved challenge to a Gucl is the
twelve unripe apples just before retiring
at nighl, | will do the same, and we shall
see who surYives.n
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

THE weathercoc< on the stccple of the
village church in Soudan, France, was
lime-worn and rusty, and those in au-
thorty decided that it should be removed.
A man clam bered up the steeple, but
just before he could reach the weather
cock he lost his balance and slid down
for seventy feet, then rebounded TO the
roof of the church, aud was precipitated
to the ground without being seriously in
jured. Then II man named Chevalier
strove to haul himself up by means of a
rope, but at last his hands slipped and
he fell backwards. Hi foot caught in
the rope, and there the man remained
suspended 100 feet from the ground, with
his h ead. .down, beating the air with his
arms, struggling to recover himself and
swaying backward and forward with n
high wind. Pierre Pean now stepped
forth, and volunteered to mount TO the
rescue Of Chevalier, but after doing his
best for three quarters of an hour he had
to descend. His place was taken by
Moreau, who climbing higher than Chev-
alier, slipped a rome around his body, and
cutting that which held his foot, freed
him from the fearful position in which he
had remained for three hours.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

IS Man street a'o)n, last evening
we overheard miner telling one Of bis
friends that his wages had an ornament
on them. FLOWS that 2' asked the
friend. "Wel, you see," replied the
miner, ga fellow owed little money
10 put a garnishment on my wages, and
BOXED IN the dictionary and found
that the deinition Of punishment is an
ornament or orramentation, ''-ANstin
PereHte.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23
CHROMOS. ,og,t TaH .laeF lsPF'iit Il IHs ins

CHROMOS. anG.t TaH .lsof iaeF'ii' i pns 'ns
world, EN- bracing over 5000, 900 Chromo'
Paintings and Choice Prints, at our en-;
larged ART Rooms. All the new anu
popular subjects at rock bottom prices
The Falls OF the Rhine, size 2Ox2S-rO'
mantle and grand Scene on the SusqgV'
hanna, one of the hits of the season. 'Io
l9X27 Lake Lucerne, Switzerland Wv
most beautiful lake in the world lsg"
Bella, charming scene in Northern "a IA
ally, companion to the preceding ~" oo
Boston Light, beautiful marine, l4S-v'
IN great demand Old Oaken BuGheH
White Mountains, Niagara Falls, NeS,
port, Saratoga, Gathering Prlmrose' i'o m
the Sea Shore, Paddy in Difficulty h'O aaU
Virgin Vesta, Snow Storm, Amer,oaIl mSl,anl
Fruits, and other 24x30 subjects, Floi1S'
Business Cards, Sunday School saiJ''
Statuary, Notices, Black ground fape,., ,a,s
etc. Also the finest and most comP'o%O "O
assortment of 9x11 Chromos, ooln
white mounts, blue line and black hlTu% IinS
gold line. Our stock embraces eyeryIImnss "ns
desirable for Dealers, Agents or Fren,uS rios,
purposes, and all should test oIr pIlt;o' p.;o'
and quality of work. The right parti IL.
can realize an Independence IN ever,
cality by taking an agency for our suss. sr.e.
ed and framed chromos. Particular 'r' mro'
illustrated catalogue on receipt OF s'"''f'
Send for SO or So outfit. Address
j. LATHAM & CO.,
4l9 Washington ST., Boston, m''''
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23
THE EYES ! THE Eyes |!
DIR. f. II. PARDEE.
OcHlist and Aurist.
a FTER a PROrRACTED BLIND.

a FTER a PROERACEED BLIND.
I N ness of more than five years, Dr. Pardee
mas made hlmsel. thoroughly and scientiica-
ly acquainted with all Diseases OF the Eye
ana Is now practicing with success not sur
passed IN the United States.
All operations performed, such as Strabis-
mus, or cross-eye, Cataract by linear extrac-
LloI' Depression or bsOrption, Pterygium, OF
ueShy membrane growing over the eye, Reduc-
tlon OF StaphylOma, or buging out of the eye,
Aftlhclal Pupil, tistula, Lachrymais, or clos
ing OF the tear passage, and all detormities Of
the Lids, etc.
Artificial Eyes inserted without the least
pam, and possessing all the movements and
orillianey OF the real eye. A large assortment
constantly on hand and for sale ut reasonable
prices. The Doctors Eye Bath for the treat.
ment and cure of all nervous diseases is used
all over this coast
Thankful to those physicians who have sent
hln eases for operation, he hopes that his uni
NoIsala success VIII warrant D continuation 0i
their confidence. His celebrity as an operator
Is co-eXtenslVe with his success, as patients
are presenting themselves, for treatment and
operations, from Now York and Boston, almost
monthly. Many patients can be seen at the
Doctors Office daily, in different stages of re-
cOVeTy.
OFFICE -7a7 Clay street, Opposite the
Plaza, San Francisco
TAKE NOTICE." II Zsar ss not 10
De of''sUed though he speaks the truth"
Reports are in circulation through the upper
country that have retired from business, that
| nave gone to the Atlantic States, that | am
in Europe, &e., &c. To those interested will
say that the report has been gotten in circula'
ton for the furtherance of other parties, who
are trying to obtain, ilegitimately, an eye
practice. The report has been started BY an
ltlnerant mountebank, and without the least
truth, as am at my Office daily, and attending
to about sixty daily patients.
IL. III. PARDEE, OcuIist,
1877 Clay Street,
my25-ly. SAN FRANCISCO
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

1t is $50 hard to do good ! On New
Years Day young man took a sol
emn VOW that, SO help him, he would
for the rest Of the year tell the truth,
let the consequence be what they might.
The con sequences have been somewhat
serious, and not Mt all agreeable. He
declined to take drink with stalwart
inebriate, and when the talwart nebri-
ate said, sneeringly, /" / suppose you
won't drink because you think I'm
drunk ?" he truthfully ans swered in the
affirmative, and had such head erect
ed on him by the stalwart nebriate
that he has to step into bis shirt at the
neck He told an ardent Democrat
who asked him for his candid opinion
concerning the Presidential election that
Hayes was elected, and when his sweet
heart asked him if she wasn't looking
horribly old, said that she was. He i.
lawyer, and when client came tc
him and said, 7" Now, cGndidIy what
do you think Of my case ?" he replied,
81 think It's n swindle, MYSELF where
upon the indignant client withdrew his
patronage, which was considerable Al
together he has had very hard time of
| it, and begins to feel discouraged.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23
MISCELLANEOUS
100000 BOTTLES
OF THE
CENTAUR LINIMENTN,

Us1lt IHUn IIlItIMLNIN,
have been sold the last year, and not ~,
complaint has reached us that they have NO,
done all that is claimed for them, Tndo.s
scientific skill cannot go beyond the resnl.
reached in these wonderful preparation,
Added to Carboic, Arnica. Mentha. soma.
Oil and White-IIazel, are other ingredior,,
which makes a family liniment that deso,
rivalry Rheumatic and bed-ridden crinnlo,
have by it been enabled to throw away thai,
crutches, and many who for years have beor
afflicted with Neuralgia, Sciatica, CakoJ
Breasts, Weak Backs, &C., have found permo.
nent relief
Mr.. JOSIAH WEsTLAKE, of Marysville O
writes
" For years my Rheumatism has been %
bad that have been unable to stir from tbo
house. | have tried every remedy conjS
hear of. Finally, | learned of the Centonus
Liniment, The first three bottles enabIed
me to walk without my crutches | am mend.
ing rapidly. L think your Liniment simpIy
u marvel"
This Liniment cures Burns and Scalds with.
out a scar extracts the poison from bites and
stings Cures Chillblains and Frosted-feet
and is very efficacious for Ear-ache, Tooth.
ache, Itch and Cutaneous Eruptions
The Centaur Liniment. yellow
Wrapper, is intended for the tough fbres
cords and muscles of horses, mules and ami.
mails.
READ! READ!
REV. Gro. W. FERRIS, Manorkill, Schobari
Co. n. Y, says:
" My horse was lame for year with a fer.
| lock wrench. All remedies utterly failed IA
! cure and | considered him worthless until
commenced to use Centaur Liniment, which
rapidly cured him. | heartily recommend il
1t makes very little difference whether tho
case be wrench" sprain, SPAWN or lamenes,
of any kind, the effects are the same. Tbe
great power of the Liniment is, however.
shown in Poll-cyil, Big-head, Sweeny, Spawn
Ring bono, Calls and Scratches. This Lin
ment is worth millions of dollars yearly to the
Stock-growers, Livery-men, Farmers and
those having valuable animals to care for
| We warrant its effects and refer to any Far.
rier who has ever used it.
Laboratory of j. b. Rose & Co.,
46 DEY ST., NEW YORK.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1877-06-23

An INDIAN TRADITIoH.-Among the
Seminole Indians there is singular ira
dition regarding the white mans origin
and superiority. They say that when the
Great Spirit made the earth, he also made
three men, all Of whom wero Of fair COM
plexion and that after making them lie
led them to the margin of a small lake
and bade them leap therein. One imme-
dately obeyed, and came oat of the water
purer than before he bathed the second
did not leap until the water became
slightly muddy, and when he bathed, he
came up copper colored the third did not
leap in until the water became black with
mud. and came out with its own color.
Then the Great Spirit laid before them
three packages Of bark, and bade them
choose, and ont Of pity for bis misfortune
of color, he gave the black man his first
choice. He took hold of each of the
packages, and having felt them, chose
the heaviest the copper-colored one then
chose the second heaviest, leaving the
white man the lightest. When the pacle-
ages were opened, the first was found to
contain spades. hoes, and all the imple-
ments Of labor the second enwrapped
hunting, fishing and warlike apparatus I;
the third gave the white man pens, ink
and paper-the engines of the mind-the
social link Of humanity tho foundation
of the white mans superiority.