The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1877-11-02
A Woman who ment business.

There is no reason why the inventor
of remedy to "cure the worst case OF
catarrh inside offive minutes shouldn't
feel it his duty to place bottle of the
same in every persons hand-"price
twenty-five cents; no cure, no pay
Therefore, the long-leggcd chap who
pulled door-bcll on John II. street
yesterday had none of that timidty in
his bearing which claracterizes rag
buyers, lightning-rod men and solici
tors for the fire sufferers. lie had {
good thing and he knew it. When the
door opened and hard-icatured wO-
man about forty years of age conlron.
ted him, he pleasantly went to business
and asked:
MADAM, is your husband ever iroub
led with the catarrh?"
"Can a man who has been dead sever
years be troubled with the catarrhY'
She grimly replied.
"But the children are liable to be at
tackled at any hour this season." he re
marked.
"WhO's children?"
"Yours, madam"
81 never had any, sir! What brought
YOU uCIt any hOW WY W. .pu 'tHit
asking those questions J"
"Madam, have compounded rene
dy for the catarrh. 1t is good thing. III
warrant it to knock any case of catarrl
sky-high in less than five minutes
swell sir, what's all this TO me!
"Why. madam-why-." he STAN
mercd.
.'Do look as if needed any catarrl
remediesT' she demanded as she step
ped out on the platform.
"Madam, | would not for the worlC
have You think that thought you hat
the catarrh, but suppose the fair ant
lovely can be attacked rs well rs tn,
strong and brave"
"And what have got TO do with al
that rigmarole? Who are You, sir an,
what do You want"
"Madam," he whispered, backing
down one step, 81 have compounded
remedy for the catarrh.'
"Who's catarrh, sirY'
"NIadam, am selling my catarrh-'
"Where is your catarrh-where i
it?' she interrupted.
lie got down on the second step an,
softly began:
"Madam, have got sure cure fo
the catarrh, and ] am selling lots of it,.
"Well, what do carel Must yo
ring my bell to tell mo that you arc sci
ling lots of eatarrh incidence"
He got down on the walk, clear @
the steps, and he tried hard to loo
beautiful around the mouth as he ex
planned;
"Madam, didn't ask You if YOU
husband was ever troubled with catal
rh?"
eyes sir and didn't reply that h
was dead? DO YOU want TO see hi
grave, sir?
''No madam, do not. am sorr
he's dead, but my catarrh remedy can
help him any. Good-by, madam"
"IIere, sir, hold on minute !" sll
called, "what was your business wit
me-"
"Why, have remedy for the ca
tarrh."
$50 you said before
81 asked you if you didn't want
purchase and"
"You are falsilier, sir, you ncv'
asked me TO purchase!''
'DO-you-want bottle!" he slow
ly asked.
ayes, sir, give me two of then
here's yonr money! Next time yo
want to sell your catarrh remedy don
begin TO talk around about the discOv,
ny of America by Columbus. lIel
you've bothered me fifteen minutes, al
put all my work behind. and It's goo
for you didn't bring the broom TO Il
door"
He retreated backwards through Il
gate, his left eye squinted up and h
mouth open. lie shut the gate, lean'
long over it and looked long al the froi
door. Bye and bye he said;
"Darn 'em! You can never tell whe
to find em!'-[ Detroit Free Press.