The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1877-10-29
QIls1ateIhgeacer.
,,oruEn MARK TWAIN YARN.
An Old Snll Explains" That Busl.
ness with the Prophets OF Baal."

ave nlm FCIaI7 VI psibuHAt HAoeuI aHA
rove a Offering streak Of profanity
through bis garrulous fabric that was re.
lre.hing to spirit that was weary Of the
Jail neutralilies Of unlecOrated speech.
One day the captain said, " Peters do you
ever read the Bib!e?"
"WeIl-yes."
II judge ii amt often by the way you
.yiI. Now you tackle ii in dead earn.
at aud you will find it will pay. Don't
YOU get discouraged, but hang right on.
finI, you won't understand II; but, by
sad By things will begin to clear up, nLd
lhen you wont lay it down to eat"
ayes, have heard that said"
"And its SO too. There amt a book
that begins with it. 1t lays over 'em all,
Peters. There's some pretty tough things
iait-there amt any getting around
Ghat,-bRI you stick to them and think
them out, and when once you get on the
inside everything's plain as day"
"The miracles, too, captain?"
"Yes cir the miracles, too. Every
one OF them. Now, there's that business
Vih the prophets Of Baal; like enough
that stumPed your
"welI, | don't know but"
"Own up, now; it stumped you. Well
| don't wonder. You hadn't had any ex.
prieuce in rayelling such things out,
ind naturally il was too many for you.
Would you like 10 have me- explain that
hing to you, and show you how to get at
he meat Of these matters?"
-Iudeed, ! would captain, il you don't
nind.'
Then The captain proceeded as follows:
III do It with pleasure. First, you see,
lnadand read, and thought and thought,
dill col to understand what people they
sue in the old Bible times, and then al
t' that 1t was all clear and easy. Now,
hii was the way l put it up, concerning
llaC and the prophets Of Baal. There
EnsOme mighty sharp men amongst
lAe public characters Of that old ancient
day, and Isaac was one Of them. Isaac
bad his iailingS-plenty Of them, too; II
AMT Io,nc to apologize for Isaac; he
played ton the prophets OF BaaI, and
like enough he was justiIable, consider
Ing The odds that was against him. No, all
lay is twant any miracle, and that Ill
show you sO's't you can see il yourself.
.Well, times had been getting rougher
iHdrOngher for prophets-that is proph.
e, Of l'eac's denomination. There was
40 prophets OF Baal in the community,
lAd only one Presbyterian; that is, II
l'isc was Presbyterian, which | reckon
hsWa', but it don't say. Naturally, the
prophets OF BNal took all the trade. Is
1ic was pretty low spirited, | reckon, but
hsWas good deal Of a man, and no
toubt he went phrophesying around,
letting on to be doing u land.OlIice bust.
les; but 'twa'nt any use; He couldn't
run any opposition 10 amount to any.
thing. By and by things got desperate
With him; he set his head to work, and
thinks i all out, and then what does he
%! Why, he begins to throw out hints
that The other parties are this and that
aud toIher-nothing very definite it may
Be, but just kind Of undermining their
reputation in quiet way. This made
TAX, Of cOursc, and finally got to the
king, The king asked Isaac what he
a meant by his talk, Says Isaac: 'Oh, no.
thing particular, only can they pray
pay down ire from heaven on an altar?
1t amt much, may 10, your majesty,
only can they do it? That's the idea
80 the king was agood deal disturbed,
aud he went to the prophets Of Baal, and
IGey'aId, pretty airy, that il he had an
lIIaf ready, they were ready; and they
laamaIed that lie had better get it Insured
loo.
$50 mex! morning all the children Of
hfael and their parents and the other
EOple gathered themselves together.
We'll, here was the great crowd OF proph.
no! Uaal packed together on one side,
,Sa Isaac walking up aud down all alone
salAe other. putting up his job. When
aue was called Isaac let on TO be com.
otiaOle and indifferent; told the other
.saa TO take thhe first innings. So they
ssn'as it the whole 450, praying around
ae Altar very hopeful, and doing their
eel best, They prayed an hour, two
,aSMas,-three hours,-and 80 on, plumb
noon, ltwa'n't any use; they hadn't
9Sk a trick. OF course they felt kind OF
SI91ed before all these people, and
'elIIhey might, Nov, what would
SAsniSnlmOus man do? Keep still
.oaId'at he? OF course. What did Is.
nc So' He grayeled the phrophets OF
Saal every way he could think Of. SAYS
' 's,,. You don't speak up loud enough;
ioat godsH'Ieep, like enough, or may be
sssssIaklnEa walk you want 10 boiler,
jou Know '-or words TO that effect; /
I II teeolIeCt the exact language. Mind
iuJGl apologize for Isaac, he had his
1, We'll, the phrOphels Of Baal prayed
I \. Tue best they knew how all that
lleFnoon, and never raised a spark. At
~. s about snndown, they were all tuck.
''s si, Gu, and they owned upand quit.
What does Isaac do now ! He steps
aud says to some friends OF his, here,
rOaF lour barrels Of water on the altar I
everybody was astonished; for the other
~, y. hHd prayed att dry, you know, and
~ Thllewashed. They poured It on.
H be, 'Heave on four more barrels
Sasn he says, 'Heaye on four more, ;
we've barrels, you see, altogether. The
,aIef ran all over the altar, and all
0Nn the sides, and filled up a trench
round il that would hold a couple Of
's'heads-'measures,' 1t says | reckon
means about n hogshead. Some Of the
ssSpA were going 10 put on their things
~ 90, Tor they allowed he was crazy.
icy dIdA'tknow Isaac. Isaac knelt down
=, ~ began to pray; he strung along,
% ,'rung along, about the heather
distant lands, and about the sister
sSaooieae', and about the state and the
~,Ssaliy at large, and about those that's in
ss S.aG'lly in the government, and all The
SS Ssl program, you know, I'M eyerybo,
aad got tired and gone 10 thinking
. 'USaI sOneIhing else, and then, all Of !
NY S,IeG, when nobody was noticing, he
NY, ny With a match and rakes Il on The
| un1hF at1.e.F ~ - ~ - 80