, 1877-09-30
SIZE MEANT BUSINESS.

SIZE MEANT BUSINESS.
Detroit Free f1<ss.
] There is no reason why the inventor OF rem
| edy to "cure the worst case Of catarrh inside o.
five minutes shouldn't feel it his duty to place
q bottle OF the sanIc in every PERSONS hand,-
''pricc, Is cents; no cure, no pay" Therefore
| tue long-leggea chap who pulled door-bell on
John Il. street yesterday had none Of that tim.
idity in lis bearing which characterizes rag-nuy-
ers, lightning-rod men, and solicitors for the
tirc-sutlcrers. He had Il good thing, and he
| knew it, and he wanted other folks to know it.
! When tho door opened and d-featurcd
| woman ABOUT ~ years OF age confronted him, le
| pleasantly went to business, and asked:
''Madam, is your husband ever troubled with
| the c.atarrh!''.
"Cun man who has been dead seven wears
he troubled with the catarrh!" she gritnly re-
| piled.
t.But the children nrc liable to be attacked at
! any hour this season" " lie remarked.
"Whose chiltircn!"
"fours, nladau.''
| II never had any, sir! What brought YOU
here, anyhow: Why do you come asking those
qucstions?''
"s1uda1n, / have compounded a remedy for
the catarrh. 1t is good thing, III warrant it
| than five mtnutcs.7'
"Wcll, sir, what's all this to nc7''
"Why, 1nataul,--wlly-a'' he stammcrcd.
''Do look US il I needed any catarrh relnc-
dies!'' she demanded, Us she stepped out on tue
platform.
-'sMatlam, l would not for the world have you
| think that thought YOU had tho catarrh but
suppose the fair and lovely can be attacked as
we'll as the strong and brave"
''!An.i What have got to do with all that rig
marole! Who arc you, sir, and what do you
wal,t:n
s'Alalam,' hc whispered, hacking down one
step, ~ have compounded remedy for the
Catarrh.n
"Whose catarrh, sirs''
tMada1n, am selling nv catarri-"
t:Whcre is your catarrll-whcrc is it.' she
interrupted.
He got down On the second step and softly
bcgan: .....
and am selling lots OF it.'
'Well, what do care! Must you ring my
door-bell to tell me that you arc selling lots Of
cat rrh mcdcinc!"
lie got down on the walk, clear of the steps,
and he tried Hard to 1nok beautiful around the
mouth us he explained:
- Madam, didn't ask you It your husband
was ever troubled with catarrhs"
''Ycs, sir, aud didn't reply that hewas dead!
Do you want to see his grave, sir?"
No. madam, do not, l am sorry he's
dead, but my catarrh remedy can't help him
any. Good-by, madam"
::Hcre, sir, hold on minutc!" she called,
"what was your business with tne!'
'3Why, have remedy for the catarrh.''
t.So you said bcforc>''
~ asked you if you didn't want to purchase
and-;'
''Iou are falsifier, sir; you never asked me
to purchasei"
asked.
s'res, sir; give me two Of them; here's your
money! Next time you want to sell your ia
tarrh remedy dou't begin to :AIk around about
the discovery Of America Here you've both
crrl the fifteen minutes, aud put all my work
behind and IT'S good for you didn't bring tho
broom to the loor!"
He retrcated backwards through the gate, his
left eve squinted up and his mouth open. Ilc
shut the gate, leaned over it and looked long at
the front door. By and BY he said:
Darn 'em! You eau never tell where to find
'em!''
4 FEMALE GAA{BLING-HOTsE.
san Francisco CorresDondtnce Boston Journal.
In one Of the most fashionable and respecta-
bile quarters in this city, near Market street,
stands 4 large and elegant-loolsing house. The
hundreds of people who daily pass it think it is
private residence, little dreaming that it is i
female gambling institution rs it is, aud in
which thousands Of dollars not infrequcnt1y
change hands nightly. 1t is patronizcd by men
and women who belong to the wealthy class,
anl who move in aristocratic circles. Cards of
'nFitat1on aFe 'ssueo oeat'ns sl"p'J A'"to-
grain, which give admission to the posscssor
The names Of some Of the patrons would aston
;sh +he community were they known. No ye-
,.;a,u ~ 1..,, - ,,,oa-n1 ~ ct,n1 IN front ~
'iie'e ~ aus h''t 70 '4io" ~ ~ ''''''. -
ths house, anu those VINO frequent IL musa keep
their carriages at least TWO blocks away. This
is rconired in order to avoid suspicion. The
front nart of the house is ALWAYS enshsouded IN
nuictuIc. At night dim lights are burned in
thr front rooms. The unner nalf Of the inside
window blinds arc thrown back, and to the
nasser-bv nothintr is to be seen to arouse the
sel;rhtcsf snsnicion Of the true CHARACTER of the
h~,se>
The MANAGER of this institution is a oman
WIN came her.. from st. Louis about a wear ago.
At one lime she figured in Washington as a
1ohhvst Sbc il 4 1nycly brunette. of oucenIv
anncarnncc. and dresses elegantly. On Your
entrance to this abode YOU arc generally vel
coined by Nat!arn,, in a hack parlor, brilliantly
lighted and handsomely furnished, into which
who has answered your bell call From theme
you are conducted into the salon OF the estab-
lishnlent, downstairs; This apartment IS eor-
geously 1ufnlsheo. lne carpet y =. ~ S,csa,lt
t|l, s n'L .Ia frn;tnre ia r;r and massive
The walis are adorned with beautiful pictures,