The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1877-01-04
How to Have q Patient Husband.

Always be a minute behind time in
everything.
Patience is great and glorious trait of
character, and almost all men lack it..
Keep them always waiting, and patince
will, of course, ensue.
If he scOlds, as very likely he will, tell
him not to be in such tantrum-it is not
becoming in man of his age.
When he wants to read you some inter-
csting item in the daily paper, tell him to
wait just one minute, while you do this
Or that. Newspaper paragraphs will last,
and if his interest in having your SYM
pathy in the bon mot dies out with wait
ing, why let it die
II he is going away on the early train,
and asks you to sew a button on his shirt
collar, let it alone till morning. There is
no hurry. The later it is sewed on the
less likely it will be to come off before he
returns. You can do it in the morning
while he is swearing over those cuff-but-
tons, which will not 60 in to their appro-
pirate button-h holes. Even If he does have
to run to catch the train, never mind; it'll
DO him no harm. Running is good exer-
else, especially rwhen a person has a
satchel and umbrella in one hand, and an
overcoat and two paper parcels to manage
with the other.
Make him wait for his dinner. He will
have better appetite. Nobody relishes
a dinner half so much if it is all ready.
He can whistle the tunes he knows, and
trot his toes, and drum on the table with
his knuckles, and indulge in various
other collaborating amusements, while
he is waiting. And patience will be do
ing her work all the time. Yes. TO he
sure.
If he ventures to demonstrate, as per-
haps he will, wither him with look, and
tell him that men should have higher sub
jects of thought than the mere filling of
their stomachs.
If you are at all religious, you can
throw in something about the eternal
interests of his SOUL" by way of clinch-
or. Hungry men generally like 10 have
theological questions brought to their no.
tice. A mans head is clearer, our physi-
ologists say, when his stomach is empty.
If he is going to take you TO ride, be a
few minutes behind time, especially if he
has fidgety horse. Most men like to
wait at the front door, with the horse cur
veting, and backing the buggy over the
curbstone, and biting at the lamp posts
and de-trees, and paving up the gravel,
and making things generally lively.
Let the horse wait; it will teach him to
stand. Horses we're made to wait; it is
their duty, and they should be broken 80
that horse-flies, as large as humble bees,
may crawl on them by the quart, and they
never lift tail by way of retaliation.
When you are going to church with
your husband. contrive to be little be-
hind. You can manage 1t readily enough,
by going back to your room and curling
those stray locks of hair above yeur eye.
brows over again; and then you might a
we'll " do over your chignon. while you
are about it." Your husband must learn
to wait.
And when you 60 into church, the ser.
vices will probably have commenced, and
it will be diversion to the congregation
to turn round and look at you, and the
Rev. Mr.. jumpers prayer, which will be
in progress, will not seem half 50 long
winded for the interruption.
Make him wait for everything, on any
occasion, and by the time you have drilled
him for fifty years, or less, he will either
have developed a patient disposition, o.
he will have gone off to play cavalier Il
some woman who is never behind time
Kate Thorn, in n. y. Weekly.