Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1877-07-20
Who Says Girls Can't Cook ?

Henry Algernon Sidney called upon
couple of young lady friends IN Easton,
: few afternoons since, aud found them i
entire possession of the house. Father al
t mother had gone TO the farm in the coul
y try, and the cook had gone with anothe
man up the Delaware to look for trailin
arbutus, with which to trim the hop-polt
Those three young people enjoyed them
selves that afternoon to a degree that wa
positively alarming-to the neighbors. Blu
alas ! the best Of fun, like many 9th,
things. is liable tn break in two in the mid
die, and, right in the midst of their jolity
Maud suddenly whispered to Annie:
"Oh! what in tie world will we do abou
Ally's supper?" You. see, his name is Al
sweet.
''Never mind, Mandy dear, we III fix that
If we can't do any better we can cook SOM
ham and eggs, anyhow
! The result WIS that Henry Algernol
was le. into the secret that the cook wa
away, and the girls didn't know enough
about cooking to disgust cannibal
but were going to try for his sake, and
he accompanied them down tn the kitchen
With herculean effort he sawed off {
couple OF slices Of ham about as thick as |;
board, and left the rind on them, telling
the girls his mother always did that te
keep them in shape-the ham-not the
girls.
Maud. without the slightest hesitation
took down the teapot, measured out tea
cupful of green and a teacupful of black
tea, which she put together, and as the
kettle was boiling she half filled the pot
with water and st it on the back part OF
the stove to draw. Annie went in the eel
lar and came back with an air of conf
dence, two pounds of butter, a dozen of
eggs, and a pitcher of milk. She laid them
down and said, inquiringly:
"MauG, when cook makes ham with
cream gravy, did you ever notice whether
she ruts in the butter. and flour, or the SUI
gar and milk tirst.''
sob no, Annie, you mix the flour and
milk and sugar, and then put the butter in
the PAM
"HOW much butter %
och don't know bout half pound,
I guess
| Annie cut off a chunk of butter about
the size of colts hind foot, and put it in
a pan, that was already hot on the fire, and
while it was melting beautifully, she pro-
ceeded to mix up the other things, which
in moment, she poured in literally and
conscientiously. The pan hesltated mo-
ment, as though it had been astonished at
! something, and then commenced to foam
away in fine style. While the girls wiped
the perspiration off their faces, Henry AL
gernon, sitting on the edge of the kitchen
table, said:
''Now. girls, why don't you flop in your
ham ?''
| "Oh! sure enough" and each girl,
grasping slice of ham, dropped it grace
fnllv in the cnothin1r -thG--ae.>A~--A-n
of July orator, and there went mp a smoke
in that kitchen alongside of which the
smoke of Sodom and Gomorrah was ten
for-a-cent cigarette, and if it had not been
that the tea kettle boiled over just then
and put out the confagration, there might
have been trouble.
When Henry Algernon. Maud and An
ME ventured in from the shelter of the
grape-al Dor and looked upon the wreck,
they all mildly sighed.
Ooh! pshaw!" observed Annie, Il don't
care, so don't. 1 can't cook anyhow"
"Never mind, ANNIE" replied Maud
consolingly Ego down in the cellar and
get some bread. and I'll cook some eggs.
Ally, how do you like your eggs?"
"Well;'' remarked Algernon. with the
air of an epicure that had graduated in a
four dollar boarding house, ''I'm not at all
particular; but, if have a preference at
all it is for broiled.''
| Maud looked at him wildly for second
but she was not going to be put down by
any young man who wore mole With two
| hairs in it for a mustache, and she got
down the broiler and set it over the Goals
to get warm. Then she broke six eggs in
to dish, and finding the broiler was so
hot she couldn't lift it, deliberately trailed
the eggs across it. Tho natural conse-
quence was another SOdom and GomOrrah,
ard another retreat to the grape-arbor,
while the teapot having boiled itself dry in
a SECOND attempt to come to the rescue,
cracked open and let the damp tea out on
the stove, and added a separate and dis
tinct perfume to the scene that was rather
pleasant
Both girls showed strong symptoms of
washing their aprons in their eyes, when
Algernon came CALAMITY to the rescue,
saying:
| 'Here girls, let's call this conundrum,
and give it up, and 60 to some place where
we can buy ice-cream and cake and straw
berries without the trouble of cooking
them"
And those two girls grabbed the smok-
ing ham off the fire, and, as one man, rails
ed up their voices, and said:
"Amen."