The Russellville Democrat., 1877-05-03
Our Interior Department.

Our Interior Department.
 The inside of an alleged human be- ing is curious study, regarded as a receptacle for diversified food. The stomach is eccentric and whimsical in its Individuality, so to speak. The gastric juice is creature of elective affinities; like Jim Smiley's jumping frog.
 A professor of chemistry, in a treatise on food, has just made dis closure which will startle and shock the entire country. He says: When we pour milk into cup of tea or cof- fee, the albumen of the milk and the tannin of the tea instantly unite and form leather, or minute flakes of the same compound which is produced in the texture of the tanned hide, and which makes it leather as distinguished from the original skin. In the course of year a tea drinker of average habits will have imbibed leather enough to make pair of shoes, if it could be put into the proper shape for the purpose"
 This is doubtless entirely true, but it stops so far short of the truth as to be no more valuable than cheap falsehood.
 We drink, every one of us, pair of boots year; but observe how much else we devour.
 We carry iron enough in our blood constantly to make horseshoe.
 We have enough argillaceous earth in our mortal frame to make, if prop erly separated and baked, dozen good sized bricks.
 We proverbially eat peck of dirt year.
 An eargerly pisciverous person. especially if he live almost exclusively on codfsh- balls-devours phosphorous and birthstone enough to make a twenty-fve-cent box of matches (stamped) every week.
 The man who carelessly tips glass of lager into his stomach seldom in- dulges in the solemn reflection that he has begun the manufacture of a hat i; yet such is the case. The malt of the beer and the chyle of the stomach in stantly unite and form felt, or minute flakes of the same compound seen so often in the at-factories. But there is no internal machinery for blocking, and, not being immediately utilized, the material is lost forever-or at least, until it returns in some more eligible form.
 Still further: it is estimated that the bones in every adult frame require to be fed with lime enough to make a marble mantle every eight months.
 The mathematician of Puck has been at work all of one afternoon on the above suggestive facts, and has found that the stomach of every tramp con- tains in three-score years and ten the following awe.inspiring aggregate of articles in a crude form:
 Mems shoes, 70 years @ 1 pair per
 year. 70pairs Horse shoes, 70 6l years, pair per
 month, as our arterial system
 renews it's blood every full
 moon ............................... $40 shoes Bricks, 6G F every years. ......... 120 bricks. Hats, not less than II a year....... 9S0 hats. Matches, (counting bissextile or
 leap years )................. 300 boxes Mantles, c. 4 year. for a well
 man.. loo nantes
 The casual reader, who has given little study to the abstruse science of human physiology, will be astonished at the result. He will be surprised to learn that we cat as many shoes as we wear, upon the authority of Yale professor; that we digest hats enough to pay all the elections bets of an aver age village, even when the pools are not withdrawn; that we float in our arteries horse-shoes eneugh to keep span of grays shod all the while; that a very brainy person, like, for instance, this Yale professor, eats phosphorous enough to keep the city lamplighter supplied with matches, if he relies mainly on his torch; that we bear Tn our animated ovens crude bricks enough to build modern fireplace, and from our changeful bones shed marble enough to furnish all O. our friends with grave stones. This is an study for the young statis, tician-the creative possibilities of our human frames. We have not figured on the soil that goes into our mouths, but it is safe to say, that hearty eater masticates a good deal of valuable real estate, if it co,ld be regularly | surveyed and sold at sl,000 front oot. .-Puek,