Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1877-04-28
How Woman Gets Even with Her
Landlord.

/ HtT ldnhlpIu- anu TOOK Il solemn VOW To
be avenged upon him this spring. She
has. besides. a housekeeper's mortal OBJ
lection to having the unfriendly ewes of
other housekeepers inspecting her do
nestle arrangements: consequently She
manages 10 kill the two obnoxious birds
with the following stone: When wom-
an calls to see the house. she takes her
mental measure instinctively. Ii the
woman is thin Tipped and combative, she
! assumes a meek look, and when with
disdainful sniff the visitor saws 20 her
companion. in Il stage aside intended To
be heard, :. Shiftless creature, Half
past 10 O'Clock and not a breakfast thing
washed.' The housekeeper smiles tim.
I idly and apologetically. and says: I'm
sorry I've got to show you through the
house when it's mussed up so. but the
fact is my three children are living sick Of
scarlet fever in that room. and the SER
want girl (she does her own work. has
just been taken sick and removed to the
smallpox hospital-you must have met
the ambulance; it hasn't been gone
more'n ten minutes-and so I've been
compelled to sort of neglect things
Then the thin-lipped woman and her
companion light out with CELEBRITY. say
ing to each other. 30. know the house
won't suit and Did YOU ever in all
the course of Your whole existence?n
If timid looking woman calls she
gives the signal TO her daughter. child
of twelve, but so wise beyond her years
rs To be of untold assistance to her
mother. to upset few chairs while she
is at the door, and then say cordially to
the visitor, 80, do come in. Ny hus-
band-may you never know how sharper
than toothless serpent it is to have
husband that drinks-thinks that he is
Sitting-Bull, and has painted himself
from the muStard-pot, and has got hold
of the meat-aN and is cavorting
around scalping the furniture, but he
never hurts any one. The sight of
strange face kinder soothes him.
Gomez" The timid woman doesn't. If
the applicant is motherly sort of wom-
an who prides herself upon her position
in society, the housekeeper insists on
being shown the permit to view the
house. and. on receiving it. saws, 80.
that's all right, but my landlord warned
me that a woman with Il wart on her
nose, or boil on her chin. or some
other distinguished mark (Which the
visitor possesses plain TO all mems
yiewS) just like you-a very common
looking person, he said-was providing
round pretending TO want to see houses,
but really trying to get impressions Of
the key-holes for Il gang Of burglars, and
| didn't believe but what you were her."
Ia Il IN.
the yigilant householder asks mysteri-
ously if her visitor >. has erown-up
daughters; and being answered
in the affirmative. says: I'm
sorry-'' then checks herself sud-
denly OF course the visitor asks why
she is sorry, but the householder SAYS,
so. it is nothing; but people sometimes
like TO know all about the neighborhood
they are moving into" and endeavors
to turn the conversation.
The visitor goes away, filed with Il
vague unrest and Il nameless terror, and
doesn't take the house. Sometimes she
imparts to her visitor, with many tears,
if her visitor be accompanied by child,
sex, and how her predecessor did, too,
and adds that of course she isn't super
stitious, and there may be nothing in it,
but she thinks it a shame that so sweet
Il child should die, and altogether she
scares the visitor into clasping her pre-
cious babe to her bosom, and beating
hasty retreat. BY thousand innocent
of this sort she is keeping
the landlord without tenant, and he
will never get one while she is in the
house.-Chicago Tribune.
Rarebd for Four.-A pound of soft,
American cheese cut in small pieces.
Stir in saucepan over Il strong fire or
alcohol lamp: add lnmn OF butter. and