The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1877-12-13
RUINED HOMES.
unhappy Marriages and Their Effects De.
scribed---Why Marriages VIII Become
Unfrequent.

lt is related OF certain old cynic that
when one of his Juniors was introduced
to him he would ask, care you mar
ried?" If the answer was in the affirm
alive, his comment was: "Lucky dog |"
1t he received negative reply, he eiacu.
lated: Happy dog !" 1t is needless
to say that the old cynic was himself a
married man. An old English poet has
compared matrimony to lighted lantern.
The insects outside butt their heads
against the pane to get in, while those
inside butt their heads to get out again.
How much cynicism there is in the old
poets figure, we caunot undertake to
say. 1t is certain that unless things
speedily mend, there will be ageneral and
lustifable belief among young people in
the infelicity of the marriage state.
Now and then, as if by flash of light
ming, the public is shown the frightful
skeleton which some unhappy couple
have kept in their closet. Or a lawsuit
takes the roof of mans house and re-
veals state off things inside which the
shuddering observer ikens to the place
of the damned. Scarcely day passes
in which it is not the duty of the news
paper chronicle to record some event
by which iarring couple advertise their
misery to the world.
1t is a dreadful ending to a drama
which opened with 80 much happy
promise. There was lovely young
bride, for all young brides are lovely,
crowned with the delicate flowers which
were emblems of her sweetness and
purity. She gave her trembling hand to
the proud and happy bridegroom. Long.
perhaps, had he pressed his ardent suit,
And now he was like young king lust
come to his majority. She was trusting.
and he was so sincerely devoted that he
knew that no wind of heaven should
visit her cheek too roughly while he
lived. What charming picture they
made as they stood at the altar-a rare
combination of beauty and strength
ioyfully entering upon the holiest cove
nant which humanity makes with hu-
manity. How many good wishes follow
them, what ripples of delight spread
outward from the Joyous event that
makes them one. Wherever they 90
they carry their happiness with them, SO
impossible of concealment that even the
most Indifferent stranger takes share in
their benediction. Manufactured old
people look on with an unconscious re.
Taxation of visage. The machine-like
servants, railway people, and hotel
clerks met on the wedding journey sur
render trifle Of their official coldness.
and look kindly on the gay, innocent
pair. Not only is earth to these new be-
ginners rosy place to live in, but each
has found the perfect companion for
life.
In the nature of things, this cannot
always be. No more is it possible that
one should always bear the weight of
grief which bows one at the side of a
death-bed. The load of sorrow wears
away before we are satisfied that we
ought ever to be happy again. And the
refined Joy of the bridal time is temper
ed by the cares and responsibilities of
married life. But when it happens, as
it often does, that the drama that began
with music, flowers, smiles, and sun
shine, speedily ends in darkness and
misery, the mournful conclusion is that
there has been terrible mistake. It is
better, perhaps, that the world should
never know just where the error lay.
Perhaps it was in the beginning. Per-
haps some fault of temper, some long
concealed vice, some unsupported weak
ness, came to the surface when all else
was smooth and fair. Possibly, each of
the partners was in fault, and, instead of
bearing with each other, they were
petulant, suspicious, exacting, or simply
cold and Indifferent. Whatever was the
original cause of estrangement, things
went on from bad to worse until the
domestic trouble is bruited far and wide.
The man and woman who tasted together
the sweetness of loves young dream are
hating each other. The husband who
swore to love and cherish, (and meant
1t, too,) is trying to break his lawful
wedlock. The wife who vowed to love
and honor finds life blank. She has
lost her happiness forever.
This is all very miserable. 1t seems
more miserable because we involuntarily
contrast the conclusion with the lovely
picture of the beginning. In all the
wide world there is no place SO horrible
as a home in which husband and wife
are at odds. 1t is no home. The woman
is an alien under the roof of him who
was to defend and protect her. The
man, who should find rest and comfort
in his home, shuts his door behind him
with sense of relief, and goes out into
the streets to escape the horror that
broods in his house. Is it any wonder
that murder, suicide, drunkenness, and
shame often hurry to drop the curtain
on all this misery? And is it any wonder
that young people who see this wretched
end of promising life are afraid to try
the experiment? =? For it is an expert
ment, and, unfortunately, the failures
are more conspicuous than the successful
issues. No man can tell whether a
majority of marriages are happy or un-
happy; too many skeletons are kept Sc
curely locked in domestic secrecy. But
there are SO many woeful chapters of
welded misery unfolded to the public
gaze that men say, 81 may be singly
nnblest; but may also be cursed
double"
1t is evident that many marriages are
not founded on love and respect. Some
are contracted like business partner
ships; some are entered upon out of
pique; and not few marry without any
adequate notion of the binding nature
of the obligations so lightly assumed
We have gone far away from the old
fashioned homely idea of home. Unless
we have more wholesome views of life
and society, happy marriages will be-
come more unfrequent.-Neao York
Times.
r. "Reminiscences of Nellie Grants Wedding.
When Mrs. Sartoris, radiant with hap
piness, had gone from home and kindred
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