, 1877-01-21
I{UM0R.

| French lats-Parisians who lose at the gam-
| ing liable.
| The colder the weather the less the thernlom-
eter mounts to-
successful operation for strabismus is called
"losing caste"
Mrs. Partineton remarks that few persons
nowadays suffer from suggestions OF the brain:
Hing Ice is the weathiest Chinaman in Frisco,
but he isn't exceed Hing Lee ric.--Boston I'osf.
When you hear man call it 1T :hiclsaeo,"
you may safely ask him when llc left st. Louis
Huntington NarkcR.
One Judge Corvette presides in a British mag
istrate's court. Prisoners invariably address
him as "Your war-ship."
A Coroncr's jury, in tic case Of man who
was killed BY falling icicle, rendered the yer
dict that he ssdicd Of hard drink"
it is all idle nonsense to say that the life OF
ballet dancer is one of toll and lrlldgcry. Every
ono knows that their pas support thcm-.
The way the King of the Sandwich Islands
carves a chicken Is to take hold of both legs,
draw long breath, and pull for a}l he is worth.
4 grave digger, who buried a Mr. Button, put
the following item in the bill which he sent to
Mrs. Button: 'To making one Buttou-holc,
$5''
Free Press: There arc more counterfeit bills in
circulation now than for years before, and the
peanut vcnder trc1nblcs as he receives Il ten-dol-
lar note.
Alfred Tcnnvson habitually refuses to receive
visitors between Mondays and Wednesdays.
This tact has given rise to the belief that Tues
day is Alfrcd's washlay.
Prof. Tyndall takes columns OF printed space
to prove that heat generates motion. ANY fool
who ever tried to sit on u re'l-llot stove could
have told him that ,nucll.-!,e,o Orleans Repub-
lican
An exchange solc1nnlv asks, .'What is the
danger OF the hour!" We know, ,tsays Burdettc).
Danger OF Standing on your head in an uneX-
pccted place, aud dropping your Arctic oyershoes
off in your eyes. Ask us hard one.
A charitable gentleman says that when
tramp applies to him for 25-ccntfscrip "to get
about bcstowins it, for fear of sgiving clrren-
q to 4 false roomcr,'' ,''-Boston Bulletin.
Norristown Herahl: We breathe easier now.
The new counterfeit S1,0oo notes now in circu-
lation can be detected by their greasy feel"
It eats into an editors salary fcarfully to get
- stuck u with four or five such notes in week.
Doctor Yes, o'Grady, bad, very bad! Do
you regulate yor1r grog!" Irish patient
first six tumblcrs, yc see, take cold; tho next
six warm; and afther that, sure, diyi1 4 bit do
care how take fem."
Lady" Well, Tibhcts, and how is your son
John getting on!" Nursc-'Oh hc be getting
ter.Iav os io he henn AMI ;o;n. .'na ~ ~ tt 5es
;erc hur;,i soeietsce 81 ~! 1rovdnd fa .no IL
riaht n-Iondon I'm. ~ p4o'l"'' A'' "''
i'sn' 10'oo'' rue
forc ~ 1ran1 Jnrv r os cocs fo,or.e ecns oe-
tsf:ent,nmcr = is .,3t - o,is..t
oath Vt secrecy to this witness, as he is a mem-
+b;nor ~ M ~ ;4,,i,.n % oeac'e any
'A.n5 "' ". a' 01'us 'us uo"
Boston Globe: The Philadelphia I.9uitr saws |
that nine-tenths OF the men Of the world are |
honese' lts pcautlu4 .I 70 see suSh 1aitii IN
a4a nnn'ao nasut I1 ~ a.e nS1s tile tne In75rer
sets O. dollar-oll changed and receives therefor
iour 'oa1. EeenI p'eees' Tue "ofa WILL all Seem to
oa'Ae" t"e"'
An old beau is putting the finishing touches to
teeth. .Bat, monsieur the lay set ia are ' rood rs