The Leavenworth weekly times. [volume] (Leavenworth, Kan.) 1870-1880, 1877-08-30
Losing ISIS Grip.
Walnut Valley Times.

grip, OF late. For the past week We have
noticed but few articles in his paper about
Handsome Bent" "One-eyed Tom," or
beautiful Benty.- Come, Mr.. TINES, for
Heavens sake don't allow your young edi-
tor to lose interest in this matter. 1t does
him so much good; and then it hurts us So
You can't imagine how We squirm when we
see whole column of your bright and
sparkling paper devoted to our "gold-head-
ed cane,D diamond shirt studs" white plug
hat" and Immaculate shirt" My dear sir,
we are sorry that We are 20 much handsOm-
er than you and we are sorry that our col
ored housekeeper can ''do up" ashirt front
no much nicer than your colored house
keeper. But then, these things are matters
of state, and. should be discussed in states
manlike manner by gentlemen OF great
power and influence.
Then there is 4 little paper published at
Topeka, the name of which We have Just
forgotten, which comes out each evening
laden with bright, beautiful stories about
the handsome editor OF the Times society
gossip, you know. This is but a
Just recognition of the virtues OF Hon.
+. B. Murdoch, State Senator OF
| four years, editor of the Walnut Valley
| Times (S2 in advance), and vice-President
| of the Florence, Eldorado Il Walnut Val
lev railroad. Not only are We credited
| with being handsome, but it is universally
| admitted that We have brains. Then We
have those other things, which it is said, is
conclusive to mans happiness. You know
what We mean. Now then, with all these
| things showered upon us, in the greatest
profusion, why should we not be happy.
And when we take into consideration
that the leading citizens Of Leavenworth'
are each morning apprised of the Saying:
and doings" OF Senator Murdoch, even Il
the putting on and taking off of his linen
collars, I'VE never wear paper collars, and
no man OF taste will wear them why should
not our heart go ont in love to friend Dan
iel X. Anthony, editor Of the TINES for hi.
kind attentiOns9
As our beautiful auburn curls cluster il
ringlets about our No. 4. head, our hear
goes out in sympathy for poor old balt
headed Anthony, with his hook nose ant
cadaverous face. Never mind, old friend
pretty is as pretty does" iOn have such
a gentle, handsome, winning way abOu
you-such a sweet disposition, that the av
erage citizen would forget to notice YOU
homely face. And then YOU can offset oul
blind eve with your snb-cllvian vein. lor
are lightning on the sub-clavian, As ever,
| fair minded man will admit.
Did il not ever occur to YOU that YOU
| paper has not dished up one-half the storie-
afoat about rs? Send down and We vii
show YOU some old files of newspapers tina
will keep you going for n year. Regular
blood-curdling stories, that will increse TN
circulation of your paper al least fifty PEI
cent. Yor might get the story Of "Blint
Bent" and the song of "One-eyed Riley,
purchase hand organ and utilize youl
| young editor as 4 monkey, and go rave
ling. You could make a fortune. W,
will guarantee Won a full house in Edo
RADIO and half fare ticket over 'Murdock's
Bobtailn Railroad or We might join team:
and go together We will show our "blind
eve" (which YOU are always doing,) YOU
to exhibit your "-ubclavian." Tickets 2:
cents; children half price. This would bt
show equal in every respect to your taste'
and mental calibre.
with all thy faults We love thee still.
Fifteen years ago last March, We rode out
of Leavenworth as a private soldier. Just
as We crossed the Big Stranger, We met, for
the first time, Col Daniel l.. Anthony, on 4
coal-black, pacing horse. As We tipped
| our hat 10 the Colonel, We recognized in him
| all the elements of Il true soldier and gen
| tleman: and We have never since
had occasion to change our minds.
| Long after he is dead. and long
after We have ceased to be State Senator
from the 18th district, editor of the Walnut