The Concordia eagle., 1877-03-03
GRAVE AND GAY.

WHAT is wanted in this country
Just now is Il company to insure the
insurance companies.
THE Mexican treasurer desires
know what can be expected Of a min
lister provided with an empty safe,
some blank books and three rulers
A GEORGIA exchange remarks that
this is the time of the year to mort
gage the crop which you have not YET
begun to make for guanO and supplies
to make it with.
THERE il talk in London of setting
up Cleopatra's needle in Northumber-
land avenue. To remove the Obelisk
/ from Alexandria and re-erect it will
cost at least $50, 900.
The town Of Wales, Me-, by no
means remote from civilization, has
managed to get along for fifteen years
without doctor, lawyer, minister or
pauper.
"PD kinder like a candy cat he
soliloquized, as he surveyed the toys,
"an' that ere tin hOss would Just put
me on my hind legs for JOY. But |
gifts nuthin'-nuthin' but cold ears,
8hivers and shakes
| SEAL skin sacques for poodles are
coming into fashion. A lady carrying
a canine pet thus attired ,called'yester-
dav to comfort poor woman who had
lost two children by starvation. The
sacque was cut Pompadour. Brooklyn
Argus.
A GENTLEMAN met citizen Of
SomerviIle recently, and said to him.
Your home is in Somerville, be-
lieve?' No. replied the Somer-
vile man. Ny home is in heaven"
Let me give you little advice said
the gentleman, "You hurry and get
postal card and write your folks that
you are never coming home"
! People are feeling a good deal moro
! tenderly toward Adam just now. The
fact that he fell, and fell badly, has
led to the belief that they must have
had city government in Eden and
an ordinance directing that the ice
should be removed from the sidewalks,
and that the other residents never
paid amy attention to it.-Norlcich
B,f'c'iH.
"OH, mamma, if only could have
one Of these new style Of dresses made
to button down the back from the
neck to the heels" Well, my
daughter, you can "What. 1 can 4"
" Yes, dear" Button clear down 2"
e Cc c-tainly, my darling" With
smoke pearl buttons?" Yes, pet"
" And gaIoon trimmincs?" "Yes,
dearest" Oh, mammal" They hug.
Chicago Journal.
YoUNG woman, there is death in the
bay rum bottle. A young lady of
Omaha, with an eye to securing n
beautiful complexion, was bathing her
face and neck in bay rum. 1t ignited
from an adjacent candle. and in less
than two minutes all the tan, frecklcs,
pimplcs and blOtches were etTectually
removed from her skin, and the skin
was eradicated ut the same time. The
young lady is now getting along with
ont any compieXiou.- IiorErg".
\ CIRCUS company on their way %
Australia, stopped to see one Of the
Fiji islands. While wandering about
one Of them turned a somersauIt, and
the native spectators were astOnished
at the sight. Thereafter, the circus
men, discerning the opportunity for
fun, varied their walks by frequent
somersaults and grotc.quc contOrtions,
all the time maintaining sober faces and
the utmost gravity Of demeanor. MuI-
titudes followed them, in the belief that
they were missionaries sent to teach
"a religion in which .omcr,ault- were It
part of the service.
A YOUNG man was teaching in 4
district school when one day the fol,
lowing conversation took place :
Teacher to little girl whom he se,@
weeping violcntlv) What is the mat
ter, Fanny Fanny-"Je-Je-Je Je
I-Johnny's tryin' ito kis--'
Teacher GnterruptingJ - ".Iohnny,
were you irving to kj-s Fanny
Johnny-"No, sir Tcachcr-"But