The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1877-08-07
FLEA BITES.


60 run" We SUPPOSE the unprotected f.
males had II stand on the platform and
wait for the train.-Farniny,oa 1fmes.
No, the females always carry their trains
with them. You will find that out Rich
ard after months intimate acquaintance
with that Colorado girl.
All. surely nothing dies but something
mourns.-t Byron.
Byron evidently never knew Sergenl
Bates or Eli Perkins.
The Cass County C. w:.r is advertising
for two girls. 1t might NIKE shift to get
along with one for awhile, at least.
The Little Blue Church people of Jack
son county will have a picnic TO day.
When church people get little blue they
need something of this sort TO enliven them
II. Martin W. is still barring his sym
Baeoo.
And the same "rag baby" gets lots oi
suStenance too.-J.Ttrsoaiaa.
The milk Of human kindness no doubt
The idea of any udder kind would he alb
surd.
Artificial potatoes are transient FUR
below for trimming bonneis.-Fot .S,otl
Monitor.
Strange that a potsto should ever get so
" fur-below good taste.
The Pilot SAYS that Appleton City il
represented this summer at Monegaw
Springs, Sweet Springs, Brownsville, lola
Springs, Kansas, the Poor house and Peni-
Tertiary.
A fair delegation TO all these places must
be a severe strain ON her best society.
An article in the n. v Evening Past is
headed "COtton and good feeling" We cam
not believe it.-IRpi.fon City IH@.
Cotton to your girl and see If il isn't.
The Enterprise Monitor announces that th.,
''city machinery of Moierly has been oiled
tip" This is doubtless owing TO the fact
that it is propelled by CREASED lightning.
"A
this office for several days. Has il b'Own
its last blast? We fear 81. We have often
thought that New Orleans man would
cause
A little rift within the lutte
Which, by and by, would make the music
mute.
Enterprise Monitor.
Don't distress yourself Mr.. Kelley; the
BAzoo is all right and issues regular edi-
tions. Your fears, however, regarding "the
New Orleans man." makes him extremely
sad, and occasions no end Of apprehension
-Moberly ought TO have an ordinance
prohibiting the sale Of mnripe and UNI
wholesome neutrality-suspicious..
Got it have you? We Thought something
was disturbing your internal economy.
AT least twenty Jeffersonians should
invest in the Kansas City Times matrimoni-
al scheme.-Iribane.
What's the use? There isn'tenny we'd
ding coming off between the Jefiersonian
who did draw an Abeline scare crow. Its
all trouble and vexation of spirit.
The people of Brownsville are in great
need of newspaper. They haven't got any
not even an apology for one.
Green apples were offered on our streets
last Tuesday at 20 cents per bushel.--iH4e
ton City Pilot.
That's cheap for collie.
The pull-back dress is wise arrange
ment, inasmuch as it enables coming events
to cast their shadows before.
This is the age of economy. Sedalia
swells black their own boots
Packard thinks Chandler alone can
save the party.-&. Joe Chronicle.
Pickle it in brandy possibly.
Fine Farr, OF warrensburg has just re-
ceived car load of spirits from the East,
in order to Withstand the siege of the tenn
perance meetings.-Basoo.
When Barrel wrote that, he had about
/" a car load in him, and didn't know what
he was talking about He's envious Of us,
cause we've got our'n yet, and he's got
away with his'n.
He fast has plenty of good lager beer
And gives hi neighbor none,
Shan't have any Of nv good lager beer,
When all of his good lager beer is all gone
journal Democrat.
This practical sentiment is Fine, Farr
beyond anything we've heard OF late.
There are many pious people in Jefier-
son. And some Of them are the happieSt
mortals under the sun-happy because they
have got religion and their neighbors
There are the same sort of people in Sc
daiia-publicans, they call them, and they
don't keep hotels either.
1t seems eminently proper that a West
ern man sheuld he Governor of OhiO.-S.
Louis Journal.
True; but the people are wicked and
need the watchful care Of Bishop. II is
proposed that they shall have it.
Steal Scissors Of the Kansas City Times,
struck mine of witticism in Jay Gould's
mishap. Fourteen consecutive paragraphs
in SATURDAYS issue indicate his "cast Of
thought" Sarcasm SO profuse is generally
mild in quality. The satire is little Cruel
sh, as it were.
CHANGEs
How merrily sounds the whistle,
How cheerily sounds the bell.
1t tells, the " strike is over,
And all has ended WE'LL
-Moderiy Entsrpris.
The transfer man is happy;
Expressmen all look CAV;
And the commercial traveller
Goes smiling on his way.
-kaasrs City Times
The peanut boy apPeareth,
And sells TO the rural lass;
The editor man produceth
His we'll worn annual pass.
81. LOu;s Journal.