The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1877-12-21
INAPPROPRlATE MELODY.

AFFECT them ut nll--ilt least as we can
see''
INAPPROPKlATE MELODY.
The pew was situated we'll up in the
middle aisle, and as we entered later
than our wont, my mother, who prid-
ed herself upon her punctuality, was
somewhat clustered by the time we
reached it.
+, z" Dearly beloved brethren the scrip
lures moveth u.s." repeated the clergy
man, in his full rich tones.
Captain links of the horse marines,
give my horse good corn and beams"
Where in earth did it come from +?
No words, you understand, only II tin
kle of jis-a7jig.jig-a- ,jig-a,jig, Gu
ly, horribly inappropriate to the occa-
sion. l look about in doubt and
Amusement; so did every body else.
Had II iunatic strayed into the church
that clear November morning, Or
suddenly my gaze fell upon my moth
er's face-such u scarlet, agOnized face
rs it was, as her trembling fingers FUN
bled nervously but vainiy with the
clasp Of the prayer book which she
held. My eyes followed hers down
ward, and the mystery was solved. In
stead of a prayer book, she had in her
haste picked up Il musical photograph
album. which was precisely the same
size and shape, never discovering the
difference until the fiendish thing be-
gan to rattle out its rollicking tune at
this horribly opportune time:
'Capt. links, of the Horse Marines"
"We have erred, and strayed from
thy ways like lost sheep.''
1t was all II confused Babel of sounds
People started, giggIed and wondered.
My mother, in wrath and agony,
struggled fiercely with her Internal ma
chine, but to no end. The stopping
part was out Of order; but the playing
part Was In horribly good condition.
She thrust it into the prayerbook rack,
and the contact with the hard wood
sent forth the sounds with retloubled
histinctness. She hid it in her muff,
but no amount of fur would muttle it,
She threw it upon the seat behind her,
where it ratified away AS nerrily AS
ever. She was just about to sit upon
1t, when II hand Was extended from a
pew behind us-u slender, delicate.
hand faultlessIy sloved in pale silver
grey. The hand closed over the box,
and in another instant we heard the
sounds growing fainter and fainter as
Helen sailed down the broad aisle,
leaving II trait OF melody behind her us
she passed. Just rs with Il click, the
air changed to +" champagne Charley"
the door closed behind them, and only
the clergyman's voice broke the still.
ness which settled over the church.
looked at my mother. The look
OF agony upon her face faded slowly to
look of intense relief. She turned
her eyes upon me, bent toward nue. to
whisper something, and-broke into II
perfectly audible laugh! 1t was a
laugh OF sheer nervousness, WITHOUT a
particle Of mirth in it, but II laugh
nevertheless, positive and uncontrol-
able. Laugh she must and laugh She
did until her face grew scarlet and the
tears poured down her cheeks, and she
was tain to hide her diminished head
behind her muff--laughed until in
sheer despair, she was obliged to flee
from the church just as the consrepa-
ton rose for the ttTe Deum."
Prof. BelPs telephones are. not for
sale at any price. They are rented in
New York for $40 q year. AS they
cost less than II dollar each, the inven-
tor is quite satisfied with the income
which he derives from this rentsl, there
being 5000 telephones in use in New
York city alone. The instrument has
been before the public but Il little over
four months. .... -I
DIR. Albert II. Bledsce, editor of the