Litchfield enquirer., 1877-02-15
CLIP PINGS

Water and soap are the Siamese twins of civilization.
 Stand up like man and show mercy like a woman.
 Water melons will not be ripe until next summer.
 1t is melancholy to think, HOW that the sun is burning up, that there is no insrr- ance on it.
 Every mans apology at two o'clock in the morning." Hic-Hicgot sthuck in tn shnow, m dear,"
 The possibility,of civil war is not creat- ing half so much consternation just now as the certainty of the tax cllector.
 The new system of transmitting sound by cleo ric telegraph enables man to telephony story to his friends long distance away. -.
 "Man," says Adam Smith, ''is an ami nal that makes bargains. No other an- imal does this: no dog exchanges bones with another"
 When proposing to widow the ques- tion whether her first husband is dead or divorced should be put as delicately as possible.
 Two ladies are discussing third, who is of course, absent. ''She is really charm ing. said one, ''and, above all. she has such an air of intelligence.
 Our foreign exchanges say "The Italian Clerical Abuses Bill" The Italian Cler- ical shouldn't be allowed to do anything of the kind.
 There is nothing so beautiful as a bank rupt trying to dodge a sheriff who owes him $500 for electioneering services.
 A criminal in a Cincinnati court being asked whether he was guilty, answered: II guess I am. judge; but I'd like to be tried, all the same."
 1T have turned many a womans head" boasted Q young nobleman of France ''Yes, replied Talleyrand, 'away from you"
 "It was New Jersey wife who said, My dear, if you can't drink bad coffee without abusing me, how is it that you can drink bad whiskey without abusing the bar-keeper.
 Jones says he don't think lie will like the reduction In car fares When he walks down in the morning now he saves seven cents; hereafter he can only save six.
 Rev. Talmage thinks Jeremiah was the journalist of the Scriptures. Jerry was a very unhappy man, you know; but thous- ands of persons will refuse to abandon the belief that Mr. Annnias was the jour. nalist of that period.
 The other day St. Louis lawyer stated that he had"verbal communicat; ons in his pocket" and subsequently, adjourned sine die until next Thursday" while member of the council at that body's last meeting, spoke of a ''verbal diagram"
 We saw girl smoking cigarette yes- terday and it so strongly reminded us of boiler about to burst that we immediately left the scene of the coming disaster and went down to see if the Washington Mon. ument was finished Washington Nation.
 "How had you the audacity. John" said Scottish laird to his servant "to go and tell some people that was a mean fellow. and no gentleman ?'' "Na. na. Sir," was the candid answer, "voull no catch me at tue like O that I aye keep my thochts to myself"
 'I had nine children to support, and it kept me busy" said Smith to Jones. as they met; ''but one of the girls got mar ried. Now have" Flight ?'' inter- l rupted Jones. 'No. ten-counting the son-in-law?" said Smith, with sigh which might have been heard afar of.
 People are feeling a good deal more tenderlY toward Adam just now. The | fact that he fell aNd fell badly, has led to the belief that they must have had a city | government Tn Eden and an ordinance l directing that the ice should be removed l from the sidewalks and that the other | residents never paved any attention to it. |