Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1877-08-15
linnlOr.

No, replied the editor, 1T was too
narrow.
Rome Sentinel; When two widowers
get warmed up in pursuit of one widow.
we see two souls with but a single
thought, two hearts which want to beat
each other.
Let mothers keep the blackberry Jam
IN 4 convenient spot in the cellar and
there will be no difficulty in having the
boys chop wood or bring up coal.
Nature seldom makes a pbool; she
simply furnishes the raw material, and
lets the fellow finish the job to suit him.
self.-Josh BRinqs.
Shakespear asked, What's in a
name?" If he had been studying east
ern wal maps he would have found that
thirty-tivc consonants and three vowels
We're III most of them.
London Fun: "Wot do yer keep on
hittin' the poor old donkey like that fur,
iather?' Cos yer mother amt here,
my lad. Cos yer mother amt ere.
Considerable provisions were stolen
during the late riots in Pittsburg, and it
is observed that the newspaper reporters
of that city are becoming unusually fat.
"She is n perfect Amazon, said a pupil
IN II OF our schools of his teacher, yes
terday, to n companion. "Ies, y said
the other, who was better versed in geo
graphy than in history. II noticed she
had an awful big mouth.
Most persons are particularly spiteful
against those foiblcs in others which
they themselves have. They remind us
of a monkey scratching and grinning ut
the mimic monkey in the glass.
An old darkey fishing ON II wharf nj
Galveston vas heard talking to the fish
he saw swimming around his line in
this fashion: Give me u bite, honey;
lie children am Il cryin down to my
house, and ! tell you it's fish or nothing
IN dat establishment.
Granville (Ct.) Sentinel; Rcsplcn-
IDENTITY gorgeous, transccndcntly beauti-
full are the emerald coats of green being
donncd by the forests but that is as
we go ON n communication sent TO us on
Monday. 1t made two lights for our
brairwood.
"Why, Ichabod, | thouhgt you got
married more'n II year ago" well,
Aunt Jerush, it was talked of. but |
were opposed to it, and 20 just gave
'em all the mitten and let the thing
drop"
A cat on n fence at midnight, when
unduly excited, generally curves its back
into half II circle. Geometrically speak
ing, the shortest possible line to it may
-be reached from an open window, and
this line is usually best described by n
boot-jack.
He was n sharp-lookiug little man
who had offered to go III the bail-bond
of n prisoner. The counsel for the
people was suspicious, and asked him,
quite stcrnly. dol understand you to
swear that you are a property holder IN
this %country?'x
you do" ne answered proudly; Il
own two lots in a buryin-ground less'n n
quarter mile from here"
The Burlington Hdukep: One day
last week II tired-looking man, with the
smell of the swamp upon his garments,
came sneaking into Tallahassee with
the returns Of the backcst county in
Florida. They gave the state to Buchan-
an and Breckenridge by an ovcrwhelm-
ing majority.
There was only one cigar left in the
box, and there were two young hopcfuls
struggling for it. The first little boy
clutched it, but he said consolingly to
his brother. Never mind, Dick, I'll
smoke till | get sick, and then you can
finish it." And the heart Of the other
little boy was comforted.-Puck.
A wag entered II sleeping-car on the
Central II few days ago, when the train
was in motion, and in an earnest and
sympathetic tone said, There's u lady
in the next coach tainted away Has
any gentleman here any liquor for her?'
Twenty-cight men Immediately rose to
their feet, each with n flask in his hand.
Who says that men have no sympa-
thy?
Boy, said II gentleman TO the hostler
Of a hotel on alighting from his phaeton,
=" extricate that quadruped from the
vehicle, stabulate him, donate him an
adequate supply Of nutritious aliment,
and when the aurora Of morning shall
again illuminate the oriental horizon /
will award thee IA pecuniary compensa-
ton for thine amiablc hospitality" The
boy ran into the house and told his
master that n D|utchman wanted to see
him.