The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1877-04-25
JUST FOR FUN.
Browns SoIiIoquy.

The aggravating days have come,
The worst of all the year,
When l, in my once happy home,
Know hardly where TO steer.
House cleaning time has come again;
Good Lord, deliver u.s.
For now comes on the dusty reign
OF constant muss and fuss.
The women folks are all as cross
AS any old she bear;
And every one of them is boss;
And all are in my hair.
My wife is i'm a fearful fiuster,
And makes fearful din;
Ny daughters all begin to bluster
The moment come in.
Now chaos rules throughout the house,
And dust on high ascendeth;
have to keep as still as a mouse;
And scolding never endeth.
My books are in the coal box tossed
My hat in the clothes basket;
Ny gloves are gone-umbrella lost
And cane-no one to ask IL.
Furniture, carpets, rugs and clothes
Are heaped up in the center;
And oh! what favors greet my nose
Whene'er the house / enter.
From boiling soap-suds frying feather,
Cobwebs broiled and roasted,
Devilled rag and scrambled leather,
And ancient rubbers toasted!
dare not say my souls my own,
or hint that I'm a sinner,
Or even give my dog bone,
For fear It's all my dinner.
A great claret drinker once refused grapes
at desert, with the remark that he cared
nothing about wine in pills.
Sprinkle, sprinkle little cart. how 1 won
der where thou art. Come and lay this fear
full dust, ere our lungs fill up and bust.
No Irishman ever made a greater bull than
the English lawyer who drew up an indict-
ment charging that the prisoner killed man
with a certain wooden instrument called an
iron pestle.
A man made a bet sthat he could ride
hy-wheel in a saw mill, and as his widow
paid the bet she remarked, william was
kind husband, but he did not know much
about hy-wheels."
Gentlemen who can't tell polonaise from
an apron front will bear in mind the prevail
ing distinction between hat and bonnet.
One.is worn over the ear and the other on
the nape of the neck.
sad, sweet smile went wandering around
pious congregation in Chicago last Sunday
morning when the good pastor, with tender
and solemn intonation, read: "Do men
gather thorps of grains or thigs of fistles?"
1t would seem that Miss Kate Claxton,s
experience should induce her to take out
fire insurance policy. Most actresses are
content with attracting sparks but this lady
seems to be followed by hames.-Boston
Commercial Bulletin.
They had saucy prisoner up before the
Paris police court the other day. The pres
ident, questioning him, said: 'Tour name2''
II descend from the Crusaders" "Your
ageg THAT OF love and eternal youth"
Your last residence?'' Probably the pot
ter's field
We used a seidlitz box for match safe in
our kitchen. This morning we went there
for match and found a broken hinge, a
metal knob. three screws five sizes of nails
a knife blade, two corks, spoonful of dis
abled tacks, a cancelled postage stamp, re-
cipe for mullins. and the part of a three
cornered file. We got a light from the
stove.-Danbury News.
A story is told OF a shrewish Scotchwoman
who tried to wean her husband from the
public house by hiring her brother to act the
part of ghost and frighten John on his way
home, "Who are you," said the guidman,
as the apparition rose before him from be-
hind the bush. 81 am auld Nick" was the
reply. Come AVA, man" said John, moth
ing daunted; "gie's shake of yaur hand;
am married tae a sister o yours"
First Briton-"Hi suppose you've card
the news from Hamerica?' Second Briton
-"IIi cawn't says that hi ave. Hi don't
take much hinterest in Hamerican affairs "
f. B.-"Well, the Hamericans, you know,
ave 'ad what they called a republic. Now,
the ole thing is gone, hand they've put the
government hunder count" S. B.-"Hi' m
not hastonished at all. Hi knew that blawst-
ed country would soon be haping hour him
stitutions."
General Butler and Judge Hoar met as OPP
posite counsel in action for damages for loss
of life brought before the Massachusetts su-
preme court on exceptions last week. But
Ter cited from Job, "Yea, all that a man
hath will he give for his life,' when Judge
Hoar remarked that that was a plea OF the
devil in a motion for a new trial, and he
didn't think that the court would be more
impressed by it because of its modern in
dorsement.
| Mrs Muggins-"Well, Mrs. Gubbins, / was
just goin' TO whisper to yer that our Mary
| Ham ere is to be married Tuesday week. I"
Mrs. G.-'Lawks, now, an 1 am right glad
to hear it my dear, though you must expect
| a soight o. trouble; and do ope wot with
the railway accidents sooicides, hydrophoby
an things about, let alone as hemperor even
may ave the measles bein' most dangerous
| to hupgrowns, that your 'usband u'll sub
scribe reg'lar to our burial society. Lon
don Fun.