The Newtown bee., 1877-10-18
UNFORTUNATE NAMES.

1, Whit m unhappy facully We A"eri cans possess, ofsn. frequently lacking the wrong name npon what would be the right thing" were it not 'hata misgiyen title sends the most promising person or place into the depths Of ridicule -..depths from which there is no reclaim Ing ihe tallen, writhing therein. What asad duty 1t is. that, 10 be cliariiable,one must begin at home. oar.--Just look at the word written out, speak Il aloud. and see if it is not thousand times more repulslve to the sensitive ear than the sensitive eye. 0h for pair of red-hot pincers and even the ghost of the being who called our pleasant space in Gods great world by the hideous name Zoar.
 Even the highest born aristocrats of the Center would look awkward, if con- tinualy pointed out as "Zoar folks; and then To hear and see the pointed-out.to sigh and smile solemnly and satirically, and remark what might be readily trans lared, ''yes--we understand; TO good can come out of Nazareth"
 The good,' Christian authoress of Shiloh" has depicted us somewhat as we are, bearing slight resemblance to human beings, unnatural excrescences. such as must naturally grow ont of the hard-named place. She has Kindly touched us up, here and there, with poetlcui pen, addicted occasionally to righteous spasms which act rather as an aggravation,in as much as they show us winrs might have been, had we been bred,in happier-souuding atmosphere. We are good children and enjoy keenly every cut we get, knowing it is for some good ii by us uot understood.
 What free moral agent" ever had any desire to go lover to Zoar?" Adverse circumstances drive book and sewing ma chine agents into our midst now and then, and who can say which suffers most, the visitors or the visited? Zoar Itas an unpromising sound. which out siders like not to take upon their lips. Call it "Shiloh," for good and all, and see if we cannot come and go without being considered "queer." Happy are tllev who know not what it is to be scan- ned, like pre-Adamite-fossil dug from out the unheard-of parts of the earth just because it happens to be mentioned "they'r from Zoar." To the average sensitive soul it IS superior to pressure on an exposed nerve. #+t .%
 Newtown has fearful ehare of un- fortunately named localities. could distigure whole wing of the BEE with them, but respect it too much to commit such an atrocity. Let me mention that Blushy Pint, Frog Ioller and Ragged Corner are all that side of the line
 .. In some way, 1 long to show my sym, pathy for the "Obtuse" folks. What souless, but fashionable, individual gave it such an immense pRll5aeis Who did r--sGo West,n before I find those red bot pincers Lands End does very. yell. but O5tuseii Who so insane. ass to. put up new Building there :,.. :.
 How, too. we are inclined to- shun people with unfortuna namest .Whe. wants to have anything eo with Bi!-:' sdad,l Who could chum with Silliman. !. Pansl how could Silliman keep his self-re- spact through boy-hood. wbile constant lly;called ''Sillyp by. alL- his playmates ? . How.eould anyone gr0wnt gehtle and re :. lissd feeling that they were Josh and coul mt helb it It is stillr greater misfortune to be named after an eminent individual The moment George Wash hington 2 s'Andrew Jackson." or Martin
 Van Buren, greet the ear, comparisons become the order of the day, andS when were the living known to compare favor
 ably in reputation with the dead ? Then, how dreadful to feel thlt Christian moth CTS have been so lost to reason. us to exr pact their daughters to grow up, pat, l terms of virtue andsmodesty,,when they themselves, blocked the pathway. to these desirable points by naming them l Cleopatra, or Betty. or S,dl Let Mir. William Shakespeare sneeringly ask, l What in A namel" We solelnnly re-
 spond, There's everything"
 e EAsTERLy.