The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1877-10-08

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att,,e request OF a mother In Israel-a
,,,oot excellent lady who has been for fifty
wears member of the Methodist church
we reproduce the following amusing ser
mon: -
A, wHtspsHELr." METHODIST SERMON on Ma
TUaE AND NOAH.
trrom Correspondent of the New York inde-
sf.sEBS pcndcntI
In the autumn of 1880 attended a Meth.
odist camp-meetipg in the INTERIOR
Georgia, aud heard a sermon wnlch l nave
never been able to forget or describe. 80
The speaker bad just oeen ncens1u, a"@
email hullet-hcaded, Of fair, sandy COM
sa,n~,on and his countenance was indicative
- s;ncerity and honesty. He was taxing
,,,, the Bibie in regular order for the nIst
fine in his life, and had gotten as Tar as tue
h;story OF Noah, the ark, the food, etc.
Resides. "i,lst before his conversion he
had been reading Goldsmith's Animated
Mater and the two together, by the ana
and assistance OF the Sperit, bad leo nim
into o powerful train Of thinking as ne
stood at his workbench, day IN ana gay
out.o The text was: AS 1t was In toe
DAYS OF Noah, so shall the coming OF the
Son Of Man be-" and he broke OUT III Tue
following strains:
eyes, nv bretherin, the heavens OF the
windows was opened-ah, and the floods OIL
the great deep kivered the Waters-an,
and there Shem, and there Ham. ana there
Japheth-ah, ALL a.gwine into the ark-ah.
aAnd there was the elephant-ah, that
p.r-e.a.t anirnal-ah, Of which Goldsmith de-
scrihes in his animated Nater'-ah what IS
as big as house-ah, and his bones as big as
a tree-ah, depending somewhat upon the
size of the tree-ab, all a-gwine into the
ark-ah. And the heavens OF the windows
was opened.ah, and the foods OF the GREAT
deep kiyered the waters-ah, and there was
Shem, and there was Ham, and there was
Japheth-ah, all a-gwine into the ark-ah.
."And there was the hippopoptamus-ah,
that r-r-e-a-t animal-ah OF which Goldsmith
describes in his Animated Nater'-ah what
has a great horn-ah stickin' right
straight up out of bis foreward-ah six feet
long, more or less-ah, depending somewhat
on the length Of Utah, a-l-l a-gwine Into the
ark-ah.
"And there was the girafe-ah, my brethe-
rim, that il-contriyed reptile Of which Gold
smith describes in his Animated Mater
alb, whose fore-legs is twenty-five feet long
alb, more or less-ah, depending somewhat
on the length OF 'em-ah, and neck so long
he can eat hay off the top OF barn-ah, de-
pending somewhat on the hithe OF the barn
alb, all a-gwine into the ark-ah. And the
heavens of the windows was opened-ah,
and the floods OF the great deep Hyered the
waters-ah, and there was Ham. and there
was Shem, and there was Japhetn-ah, ALL
a-gwine into the ark-ab.
~ fbora NOS tho 0ahro nv brethren.
ah, that b-e-a-u-t-i-f-rl-l animal OF which
Goldsmith describes in his Animated Ma
ter'-ah, what has three hundred stripes a.
runnin' right straight around his body-ah,
more or less, depending somewhat on the
number OF stripes-ah, and nary two stripes
alike-ah, ALL a-gwine into the ark-ah.
"And there was the anacender-ah, that !
great sarpint Of which Goldsmith de-
scribes in his Animated Nater'-ab, what
can swallow six oxens at q meal-ah, pro- |
vided his appetite don't call for less-ab, ALL
a-gwine into the ark-ah. And the heavens |
of the windows was opened-ah, and the |
floods OF the great deep kiyered the waters
alb. and there was Shem, and there was |
Ham, and there was Japheth-ah. all a.
gwine into the ark-ah. rs.'. s.ss. .,
"And there was the lion, brethren-ah, |
what is the king OF beasts, accordin' to |
Scripter-ah. and who, as St.. Paul says-ab, |
prowls around OF a night like roarin'-
devil-ah, a-seekin' if be Can't catch some
body-ah; ALL a-gwine into the ark-ah.
"And there was the antelope-ah, my |
brethren, that frisky little crltter-ah, Of |
which Goldsmith describes in his 'Ani- |
mated Mater lab, what can Jump seventy |
five foot straight up-ah, and twice that dis |
lance down-ah, provided his legs will take
him that fur-ah, a-l-i a-gWine into the ark
alb. And the heavens OF the windows was
opened-ah, and the floods of the great deep
kivered the waters-ah, and there was Shem,
and there was Ham. and there was Japheth-
all, ALL a-gwine into the ark-ah.
"But time would fail me, my bretherin, to
describe all the animals that went into the
ark-ah. Your patience and my strength
would give out before [ got half through
ah. We talk, my bretherin, about the faith
OF Abraham and the patience Of Job-ah, but
it strikes me they didn't go much ahead OF
old Noer-ah. It tuck right smart chance
o. botG 10 gether up all that gopher-wood
and pitch. and other truck for to build
that craft-ah. I am q sort OF carpenter
myself, and have some idea OF the iob-ah.
But to hammer, and saw, and maui, and
split away on that one thing a hundred
in another world-ah-I tell ye my, brethe-
rim, il the Lord had a-sot Job at that, it's my
opinion he would a-tuck his wife's advice
inside OF fifty year-ah. Besides, no doubt,
his righteous soul was veXed every day.
hand runnin', with the flthy cemmunica-
tons OF the blasphemious set that was al
WAYS a-ioaferin' and a.saunterin' around-ah,
a-pickin' up his tools and a-misplacin' 'em,
and a-calIin' him an old fool or somethin'
worse-ah, and. to clap the climax, he was
preacher, and had that ongodly gineration
on his hands every Sunday-ab. But the
Lord stood by him and seed him through
the job-ah; and when everything was ready
he didn't send Noer out to scrimmage an
scour and hunt all over the wild world for
TO git I'D the critters and yarmonts that he
wanted saved-ah. They all come to, his
hand OF their own accord, and Noer only
had to head 'em in and Tx 'em around In
their places-ah. Then he gethered up his
own family, and the Lord shut him in, and
the heavens OF the windows was open-ah.
"But, my bretberin, Noer-ah had use for
patience after this-ah. Think what time
he must a-bad a-feediD' and a-waterin' and
a-cleanin' out after such crowd-ah. Some
of 'em, according to Goldsmith's .Anima.
ted Nater'-ab, was carnivorious, and want
ed freshmeat-ah; and some was herbivorions,
and wanted vegetable food-ah; and some was
wormivorious, and. swallowed live things
whole-ah; and he had to feed everything &C.
cordip' to his mater. Hence we view, my bre-
therin.ah, as the mater Of the animals wasn't
altered by gofn, into the ark-ab, some of
'em would roar, and howle, and bark, and
bray, and squeal, and blate the whole indu-
rim night-ah, a-drivin' sleep from his eyes
and slumber from bis eyelets-ah; and at