The Cairo bulletin. [volume] (Cairo, Ill.) 1872-1878, 1877-10-26
VOLS.
The Balletin.
McSORLEY'S MULE.
A StnIwart Tale OF denomination
- and Cancellations,
N.u, ritnou

New 1Ork IlIneF'
Much has been written oil the mule and
his vicious and intrac'able nature, but all
writers are unanimous In asserting that he
| IL insensible 10 kindness. MIR. Mcsoriey's
mule Is no exception to this rule. AS
may not be generally known, Mr.. McSorley
resides In the northern part OF Kentucky,
and possesses mule that Is tho terror OF
| the entire c0ntry. IL was this Identical
mule that, in April, 1860, kicked co!ored
man entirely across the Ohio river, and
was lheyeupon announced by the local Ken
lucky press as hypocrltical abolitionist
| and hireling OF the federal tyrant. Dur
| ing the last sixteen years McSoriey's mule
has kick sd more than three gross OF assert
ed citizens. OF all ages and OF every kindof
ex, including three adyoc ites ofwomen's
rights, and an old line whig He has kill.
ed thfty-two victims outright by kicking
| them iu the head, lesides inilicting scalp
wounds upon eighteen colOrcd men. 1--WE
| classify the legs that he has broken accord
| Ing 10 their religious be ief, we find that
he has broken seventy Methodist, sixty.
three Baptist, fourteen Episcopaian and
| three Presby terisn legs, and has, moreover,
| splintered one frte-,hlnkiDg leg that was
ma 10 Of the bert h!cEOry. SO vicious was
this eminent animal that Mr. McSOrley rare
| ly ven'ured 10 take him from the stable.
He was kept securely fastened with
chain halter, and his legs were tied togeth-
er with short pieces of rope. Even when
thus restrained he tccceeded In kicking
every person who came W thin short range
OF his heel and scarcely day pas ed with
out the manning ofat least one Of Mr.. Nc.
SoTley's numerous and faithful dogs. The
| groom was the only man who could keep
the mule decently quiet This groom was
aman o! few words, and placed little de.
pendsnce upon the efficacy OF blasphemy;
but when the mule IN inigei TO lure Il dog
| within the reach Of his heels and began u
bang the poor, animal against the side of
the stable, hitting.him again and again a. he
rebounded from the boards, the groom
| would take 4 ten foot pole and lay it over
the mule until the later became temp0rari.
| ly too discouraged to kick at the most elig.
| BILE fat man.
Not very long ago Mr.. McSorlcy disharg.
ed his groom, for reasons that are not
pertinent to.this narrative. There were
number 0! applicants lOs the situation
| Among them was one fellow who made
himself conspicous by asserting that all the
mule needed was kind treatment, and that
1.-The was placed in charge OF the animal he
would speedily render him tractable Al d
trustworthy. ltneed hardly be said that
Mr.. McSorley did not receive this mau's
| application with any favor, for he had not
kept q mule for sixteen years without
learning something of the character Of the
animal, Like wise man, he selected
modest bat athelehc app icant, who under
took TO keep this mule in order, aud who
had won Mr., MGSorley respect by remark
ing, when it was ruln)red that the advO-
cate OF kindness 10 males had been engag-
ed, that "his hart bled for tie poor dogs"
The new groom entered upon his du.
ties on Mondy morning--the mn 10 having
killed iayorite Newfoundland dog. and
broken colored clergymln's whitewash
pail all to pieces on the prei.ols Sunday
afternoon, His first act was 10 feed the
animal q double allowance OF oats, and
taking advantage Of the temporary quiet
due 10 repletion, he united the mules fast.
enings and opened the stable door. Tile
mule promptly improved the opportunity
to rushat McSorley's entire collection o.
dogs, which happened TO be assemble in
the stable yard, and with few wcll-dlrect-
ed kicks hurled them into dsused well,
where they doubtless persisted miserably,
since not one them has yet reappeared. ii,
then prayed triumphantly and fed to the
best OF the neighboring pastures, where he
has since roamed at large in a more con-
tented frame Of mind.
: This conduct on the part o. the groom
was so totally unexpected that Mr.. Nc
Sorley was greatly astonished, and aske,
!. Tor an explanation. The new groom list
ened calmly to his employers excited re
marks, and then quietly asked if the null
J.. had hurt auy.man or dog since his release
AS Mr. McSorle was forced to admit that n
mule causaltes had occurred since Monda,
noon, the groom remarked that this wa
due to his new system of management
$50 long" said he "as the mule has tn
freedom OF the pasture, and so long as n
q one atteTnts to make him do any thing this
3 docs not meet his views, he will give Il
trouble. For sixteen years that mule ha
been Subject to the restraints OF the har
ness and the stable, and has naturally e.
pressed his indignation by kicks. He
n, now freed from restraint, and unless some
body ventures 10 enter his par ticular pa
ture. he will remain quiet MoreOvc
whether tia mu is or Is not conciliated
1t svery certain that be will stay IN the pa
n ture, since neither you nor can coax hi
to go Into the stable again. This speec
was 80 convincing and unansweIable tn
Mr.. McSorley simply referred in gener
terms to the Calvanistic doctrine OF futu
punishment. The once dreaded mule
now turning JOY full somersaults in the pa
;. ture, and the new groom intends to tray
through Kentucky delivering pubic lie
lures upon the duty OF conciliating mule,
-. This story il not true, and it has no me
al whatever.
| ------------------ - .
Mo- n M \lIf0TnAl