Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1877-01-22
Mark Twain's Latest.
THE STORY A CANvAssER TOLD HIN ABOUT
ECHO-COLLECTING

my parents died, alas when 1 was
little, sinless child. My Uncle lth.
uricl took me to his heart and reared
me as his own. He was my only rea-
tive in the wide world but he was good
and rich and generous. He reared mt
in the lap of luxury. | know no want
that money could satisfy.
"ln the fullness of time l was grad
uated. and went with two of my servants
my chamberlain and my valet-to
travel in foreign countries During the
four years fitted upon careless wing
amid the beauteous gardens of the dis
tant strand, if you will permit this
form of speech in one whose tongue was
even attuned to poesY; and, indeed, |
SO speak with confidence, as one unto
his kind, for perceive by your eyes
that you. too, sir, are gifted with the
divine imitation. In those far lands,
reveled in the ambrosia food that fruet-
iies the soul. the mind, the heart. But
of all things that which most appealed
to my Unborn aesthetic taste was the
prevailing custom there among the rich
of making collections of elegant and
costly rarities, dainty objects de ventu.
and in an evil hour tried to uplift my
Uncle lthuriel to plane of sympathy
with this exquisite employment.
"l wrote and told him of one gentle
mans vast collection of shells; anoth
er's noble collection of mee-schaum
pipes; another's elevatiDg and refining
collection of undecipherable autographs
another's priceless collection of old
china another's enchanting collection
of postage stamps-and so forth and so
on. Soon my letters yielded fruit. My
uncle began to look around for something
to make a collection of. You may
know. perhaps. how feetly taste like
this dilates. His soon became raging
fever, though l knew it not. He began
to neglect his great pork business pres
emily he wholly retired and turned an
elegant leisure into rabid search for
curious things. His wealth was vast.
and he spared it not. First he tried
cow bells. He made collection which
filled five large salons. and comprehend
ed all the different sorts of cow bells
that had ever been contrived, save one.
That One-an antique, and the only
| specimen extant-was possessed by
another collector. My uncle offered
enormous sums for it. but the gentleman
would not sell. Doubtless you know
what necessarily resulted. A true col
lector attaches no value to collection
that is not complete. His great heart
breaks, he sells his hoard, he turns his
mind to some field that seems unoccu-
pied.
Thus did my uncle. He next tried
brick bats. After pilIng up vast and
intensely interesting collection, the
former difficulty supervened; his great
heart broke again he sold out his soul:
idol to the retired brewer who possessed
the missing brick. Then he tried fin
hatchets and other implements of prime
val man. but by and by discovered tha
the factory where they were made wa
supplying other collectors as we'll a
himself. He tried Aztec inscription
and stuffed whales-another failure. al
ter incredible labor and expense. Wher
his collection seemed at last perfect
4 stuffed whale arrived from Greenland
and an Aztec inscription from the cur
:, durango regions of Central Americ
that made all former specimens insign'
6cant. My uncle hastened to secur
+. these noble gems. He got the stuffe
r whale. but another collector got the il
y scription. A real cundurango. as poss
: BILE you may know, is possession
q such supreme value that, when a collie
tor once gets it, he will rather pa
). with his family than with it. So II
: uncle sold out, and saw his darlings &
z forth never more to return; and h
y coal black hair turned white as snow
o single night.
Now he waited, and thought. T
t. knew another disappointment mig
n kill him. He was resolved that
u would choose things next time that
:. other man was collecting. He careful
8. made up his mind. and once more entt
IN ed the 6eld-this time to make collet
ion of echoes"
IT. ''Of what?" said l.
% Echoes, sir. His first purchase W
or an echo in Georgia that repeated fo
To- times; his next was a x-repeater
ne Maryland; his next was a nine-re pea
ge in Kansas his next was twelve
peater in Tennessee. which he got che
H. H. so to speak, because it was out Of rep
Mt. a portion of the crag. which reflected
ne, having tumbled down. He belle,
our he could repair it at a cost of
AK thousand dollars. and, by increasing
- elevation with masonry, treble the
peating capacity; but the architect Y
on undertook the job had never built
gs. echo before. and so he utterly spoi
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