The weekly Thibodaux sentinel and journal of the 8th Senatorial District. [volume] (Thibodaux, Lna. [i.e. La.]) 1875-1898, 1877-03-10

anu MY CcHtS tAdl j kl0W lore
remedies tor whooping caugh
than all the doctors in Thibodaux.
Now a little advice to any of
my readers who may ever get this
blessed complaint. Ia the first
place, when you fpd yourself
whooping. why just vboop away;
don't. under any consideration
stop, tiff you're satisfied. And
when a fit of coughing comes, no
matte: what may I've your busi>
ness, wether work or play whether
you are listening to a long yarn
or spinning one yourself, whether
you want to cry or to eat. or are
at a theatre and want to laugh,
just you drop all such business,
lean up against the side of a
house, or hug some friendly post
AMI turn your attention stictly to
coughing, and when you're
through, take your handkerchief
out of your pocket, wipe the tears
out of your eyes, then wipe the
froth from your lips, then blow
your nose three times, aud shake
your head aud blow a long whis-
tie ; then you will be ready for bu
siness.
If you should feel like throw
ing your head back SO IN to have
IA good long yawn, you'll be sur.
prised at the quickness with
which you'll change your notion,
and hunt for a lamp post.
If you should feel like sitting
down and drinking a gallon of
cold sparkling WHITEWATER with
a bead on it--do'nt do it it will
only be waste of time and mate
rial.
After you have gotten throu gh
a paroxysm of coughing, you
should be disposed to call upon
Helen Blazes, or any other abs
sent friend, there will be no great
nafm III DONG so.
If you have eaten a good dim
ner, and five minutes after, you
are hugging a gallery post con-
templating that dinner at your
feet, don't worry about it, you
will have a splendid appetite for
supper.
When you go to bed, DESTROYS
of rising early in the morning.
don't take the trouble to set your
alarm clock, nor bother any one
to waken you, you will not over
sleep yourself much.
Ifyou see anything that is fun
ny, and throw your head back to
have a real good hearty laugh,
and in two seconds find a rivu'et
Of tears, big enough to turn a
water wheel "a small wheel), flow.
ing down on each side of your
nose, don't worry about it: it's
all right.
Take all sorts Of remedies.
Why l have eaten enough hore.
hound candy to make all the chill
dren i'll Thibodaux happy if it
had been divided among them,
and the old lady that made it is
half crazy, because l told her
that [ wanted no more ; her bust
ness is ruined.
l have drank enough syrups
and hot eggnoggs that. If it were
all i'll II vase, and the immortal
''S' of the Electoral Board were
pitched head foremost into it, it
would send them all gurgling
down into that warm Kingdom
whose sulpherous ruler has been
applying all modern inventions
for heating houses, to a room ex
presssly fitted up for their arrival.
Follow the advice of every
body except your physician. If
you disrover yourself whooping
do not go to the Doctor. Come to
me. I have had seven remedies
per day, given me for 40 days.
That makes $50. One half l re-
member which l will give to anv
patient at ten cents each and
one dozen for a dollar. That is
not half what a doctor would
charge.
It's true, that 1 tried none of
them, but have the word and
honor of each man or woman who
gave them to me, that they are
infaIlible, and never fail to cure
in "a hours.
But I'll tell you what did cure
me. After five weeks caughing in
spite of all remedies, the Helen
D'Este Theatrical Troupe came
here, and l attended their enter
taiumehts five nights in success
sion, which did me more good
then all other remedies and ad
vice combined.
The moral of all this ia. when