The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1877-05-24
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

rides astraddle of everything.
The bashful man who asked his girl
If her favorite beverage wasn't "pop :"
was referred to her popper.-Norwich
(Conn.) Bulletin.
"A good sneeze will help man won.
derfully in pronouncing some of the Rus
sian names. Try 1t on Kischeneff.-
Richmond Enquirer.
1t costs only Sc .25 to make sG5 sew.
ing machine, and it is about time that the
general public got mad and got its back
up.--Detron Free Press.
The season fast approaches when the
young man with finances to cover just two
plates Of ice-cream awaits breatlflessly
the answer to, "Will you have some
cake?"
ANY citizen who so desires can now
sign himself "Many Taxpayers in his
communications to the newspapers The
law forbiddins it has been repealed.-De-
trott Free Press
The sewing machine agent, since the
patent run out, has to talk just as much
and just as fast, and tell Just as many
lies for $28 as he used to tell for S135.-
Burlington Haaok- kye.
1t takes six loads of brick, one thou
sand feet Of boards, three wagon-loads of
soil and weeks work to make such a
flower bed in the front yard as the average
woman sighs for Detroit Free Press.
There once was a little upstart, o,
Said 6 tomayto" instead Of "tomarto";
But it made his pa grieve,
And he said I'D as lieve
Hear you call a potato 'potarto'"
--Bosfon Adpertiser.
The ten-year-old boy that won't sell
his mothers three-dollar brass kettle for
enough money to purchase twenty five
cent circus-ticket, either lacks courage and
experience, or has no taste for Ii, gh- toned
ements.-No,rsstoUn Herald
Two ragged little urchins were stand
ing in the gutter looking at a lady who
had just fallen down on the pavement
+" 1t isn't so much that l like oranges, I" OBJ
served one of them, "but what a lot of
people you can bring down with the pcelp
=" What do COWS have tails fors, asked
the little boy of his farmer father. "To
brush away flies, my child" responded
the patcrnal: "Well, pa" continued the
inquisitiye little chap, " comets have tails,
couldn't say.
When man goes round the house
signing and wishing himself dead, you
needn't trouble to put the bottle of opium
away. He wouldn't touch it for worlds.
Ii he should be suddenly attacked by collie
you would hear him screaming out for
doctor at the top of his voice.
The man on West Hill got up the
other night to get dose of anti-bilious
pills. BY some mistake he got into his
boys box of marbles, and swallowed half
a dozen blood al leys and commics, and
now, as he walks about the streets, he rat
ties like pasteboard dice box Burling-
ton Hawk-Ege.
Native clergymen in the Sandwich
Islands go barefoot winter and summer,
and are therefore not inflicted about
Christmas time with twenty three pairs of
worked slippers, of assorted sizes, pre-
sented by young lady members Of their
congregations. This exemption more than
compensates them for three or four toe
nails knocked off during the year.-N0r-
ristoaoa tConn.) Herald.
-"Hit it.'' "Didn't." "Did, too."
Didn't neither" "Did." Didn't"
81 won't play any more" "Don't want
you to- !" Hateful thing" "Don'tyou
Mother says you don't come and get it
but six days in week before we've seen
it.n Thus the familiar trifies of the cro-
quet ground begin to be heard again as
they float along the street. Exchange.
Now the poor, much-abused sewing
machine agent must submit to further
maltreatment. Instead of selling for sixty
dollars machine which cost six dollars
at wholesale rates, his starving price will
be cut down to thirty dollars. An agents
protective union, band of brothers, serene
sodality Of loquacious leaguers, or some
thing of the sort ought to be started, and
they might solicit subscriptions from the
lucky dogs who bought machines on in
stallments and are now rolling in wealth.
-Boston Advertiser.
--Mullet fishing in the City Of Oswego,
N. Y, and elsewhere along the Oswego
River, is very popular and profitable
amusement. The fish are much larger
than suckers, but resemble them some
what Some of them are as large as q
shad, vet they will not bite at bait. They
are being caught in great quantities with
triple hooks, which are attached to line
and pole and dropped into the water.
When these hooks are drawn out from
the water they invariably have upon them
two and often three mullets. The poor
people Of Oswego particularly engage in
this style Of fishing.
ia Lovers writes us: Suppose !
see young lady home from church, and
the night q dark and rainy, and upon ar-
rivinE at her house she darts through the
door without saying as much - good
NIGHT leaving ma sfaudin0 outside what