Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1877-12-19

The Cincinnati Breakfast Tube tells oil
n couple from Kentucky who visited Il
leading hotel of that city on their we'd
ding tour
" | say Mister Grand,'" said Zeke, as
he marched up to the Office, leaving Polly
hanging behind and leaning tenderly
against steam heater, whats the show
for Il few days board and lodgin' with ye?
We have no team to look arter. Jest our
two selveS-kim in on the keers."
There's the man you want to see,"
said the gentleman addressed, pointing to
the clerk.
"Well, I'm real down right glad to see
ye." said Zeke to the clerk " IIow's
things been moving along with ye-and
say-what dye Think want to tie up
with you spell, if your prices are rea-
sonable. Polly an me, have Just been
grttn' spiced, an seein' rs she's never
knocked round the world any to speak of,
| jest thought we'd kim down to see the
fountain an the bridge, an have peep at
the animals in the garden with the big
name an see how prices stood on house
kecpin' traps. There amt much style
about us, an so you needn't 90 TO any ex-
ira trouble on our account. We can eat
whatever you set before your reg'la
hoarders-so it's fresh an the vttes ain t
too high seasoned, We both take milk
an sugar in our coffee, an if it's Just as
handy we'd like to have it three times Il
day We'd like to have room with Il
carpet, handy to IL pnmp-for may not
be around all the time, and Polly's 50 shy
she's mos likely to get as dry us II her.
rim aforo she'd venture out to git herself
Il drink, if she couldn see the vel from
the winder We're not particular what
time we have our meals, an wouldn t
want ye to make no change in hours on
our account. Our time amt presSin' an
we can easy fix our programme to suit the
rules o the house. We'd like to eat at
the lust table, if it won't interfere with
reg lar arrangements, an if you should
all happen to be gone to bed when we get
home from the theatre, we can 90 around
to the back door or climb in at the winder
if we have n room down stairs. Polly
will make the bed, Of course, and sweep
out the room herself, so if the hired gal
wants to run over and see her mother,
don't know us we'll raise any objections,
pervided she gets back in time TO peel the
pertaters for dinner. If there's any shin
dig comm off in the house while we re
with ye, we won't mind slingin' heel in
ii, but don't mean to insinerate that you
ought 10 get up dance on account of our
comm We're both young and like fun as
well as any body, but we don't want to
have good time at any body eOse's ex-
pense. Eve got plenty of money with
me, and intend to pay us | go-stiIl we're
not big feelin', an if ye have any extra
circus tickets we're not above cxceptin' II
few, rs b'leevc tavern keepers allus has
Il free blow with sech concerns, Specially |
if the show ties up with 'em.
We shall want to commence eatin' in
the mornin' and you won't have to keep
the table waitin' for us ut AIRY meal. IfI
we re not here every time the bell rings, |
90 right along an dish up, an We'll take
our chances with whatever cold vittles the
cook Can shake up when we Git around. |
Move shan't want any supper tonight; |
part of II duck, six or eight eggs, three
pies, II hull raft o tars, pickles an things, |
an seven different kind o cake in our
basket here, left from our lunch on the
keers, an if yell Jest step out an cit us
u lineup O. water, we'll sit right down
ar eat our bite, an if ye'd like to polish
them store teeth o yourn in little prime
country cookin', yer welcome to jine right
in with Us, an what we don't git away
with ye can lay out before the boarders to-
morrow.
- But to come right down to business
for see by the way Polly's bttn' her lip
an thinkin' O home, that them ere new
shoes is est cen most killin' her, an
she'd give her last winters bonnet to have
them burnin' feet o. hern in the hoss-
trough-so now the question is, what'll ye
tax us for weeks kcepin', including the
washin' of shirt an handkerchief for me
an little toggery for Polly9 There
won't be any mendin', ye know, for our
traps is all bran new, but we'll want Il
snack O. cold meat an biscuit TO take along
sometimes when we 90 out to see the
sights an to the theatre. An there we've
got it all now, how much be yc goin' to
charge for n weeks keepin'?"
Seventy-fve dollars" said the clerk.
Great ,Jmson-wccd and plow- share!
What air. ye thinkin' about man? We
only want to stay II week not all winter
said Zeke leaning over the counter with
eyes MS big rs the clerks diamond pin.
Il told you correctly, sir. Seventy-fve
dollars is the charge-not including ex-
tras.'
"Mighty burr-oakn' said Zeko, turning
to Polly. "Did you ever! The price o
three COWS for II weeks sleepin' an eatin'
The man is crazy an thinks | want to buy
the house, or else somebody's told him
how much money I've got an he wants
the hull pile. Kim along, let's get out O.
here, or if we stay ten minutes longer we
won't git away with the chickens"