, 1877-08-15
PARIS NEWSPAPER WIT.

Ann What my eIet And me.
3. r. g.
PARIS NEWSPAPER WIT.
!SthT i"rk 9i'nrfh.
They afket3 gentleman addicted to gambling
II they played trentr-ct-quaranie at Wlesl,alep,
~ heard that. they did," he rrplr,i, {" but Ia
reach the run1n you hare to rass laros1gh three
others where shere nse so,,lrtte 1ay.outs. |
never MRS able tn penetrate that far"
This latsy AMI her daughter. rs eserhody
KNOWS, spare NO effort 10 repair the rsvnges oi
time IN their faycs. and arr not always succsss.
old and worn sl,e 1ooks.'; Yes: % po,, wom. .n"
M. She t. beginning to look n OLD "a Lrr
dauglltsr.n I'LL
"l .lu not wtst," said The mistrcss 10 the
mail. to have you receive ynisr sweetheart #,
my Kitchen; it'tn's the thing '.You are
Tety kohi." said ihe maid to Tie mistress, "ard
70 i,csh Iron, ne country, aud tttnid and ,,oby-
!"s'-llko, 50 didn't shiuk you womb care 10
have ne br!us him into tue paslor."
The honorable gentleman Is seeking a rc.etec-
ttou, and runs 10 nlee. his constituent irutn
IT, lt.t y vr ane e,,t %oG dsy hoGorahs
"Antl your onorabls wife il well, too, hope i''
"SlIe IT," ~ was Just thinking Or vol. I
knew | should meet yOs, for lust found the cor
ner had the pleasure of meeting your honora.
O4G NO$s
The hoy, didn't get prize. nor even an honor
ly tl,e authnr Of his being, THAT you were bow
erful in rompoxltionf' "yes, III; but fof INV
examination theme copied one Vi Tie tutters
sna wrote na dcstrlbsni. the tl,neA YOU saw.
When y.u were trave,lng and as there were 1o3
graduated with distinction and rcaI IN cssav On
'Jt,c Real and the 1lca1.'' faints.
At funeral q mouruer with passion for
gonct Of CHANCE tfnla himself iu the cYrrIure
With the heartbrukcn parents Of thu corpsc.
!he procession moFes at n .snail's pace, antl
there Is evidently long hours ride betorc the
eelnctery IL Reached. Tie Inourner standa II rs
lutE ~ lie can. then, placing Ills hand ip lis
p@ket, rai tlcs few cot1ls Significantly, and;
turnInKto The sorrow-stIlclen father, whisper.
for hve''
The Loui*-Qutnxr 1.oot-hcel IL a thing of
hcantJ, but by no means Joy forever to its
wcarrr. a Indy wears u pair OF sweet littlu
'otlfncs with heels four inches high. Sir
suffers sgo,Itrs, and. which ia worac, tho dear
''sg. twist nl war III they look IKE patr Of
iti'!'ssl tn HASTE lie examines tho heels, feels
tllrit pnlsts, tries ausrultaton, analyzcs them,
whcn suddenly h. has MI Idea. "My 0mt," hc
,: st1ss: :" know wl.at'h wrong with these bootsl
Al ~ artistsc compositions Of the Consarva-
Tory; ~ th'e Is Your soil, my good wulhanl
You w!ss1 him to com ncte III tile Tragedy class r.
= Yes, Hit. Fruun Ills lnlancy lc llus hid pus-
slot fur IT, Aln!osl triorc he could walk la
wonl Try to stab t1s 6at, "Msle!lcr ol r.
Nalai,s. Moti'crm hut sa. vii, eay s9y p3SUs; tSai
shc PROMISES tu l,c nh ornament Ut the stage,
wtl y''r 1'''tr ,Cr't,s-"aty conscience forlis
int " 10 s"' MotlIrr.-"Tqcu put III vt lcstst
that sllc Is pretty aud thie. conluro yuu not
tU hlast Qlcr dramatic futtjrg,D
The terrible strife between the Clcricals and
LtlHrals Ut Switzerland ytill saaes with ull-
nhatc.a vlncnre. ''Wl!u," kuli stranger 10
the 1rvsnlcnt IT Cant0l,, VIII, at Slatr ban.
stoH--"who Ia that rather nlutton.hcaue4l
gentleman yus1 have just welcomed. ''My
Predecessor, y toul Of lsun,lsl, tyranny. Nt
the cierttut, l,clorc that hu dcicate,l inc by
tprsu'ling llcllssl, xaalnny to ,he ellecl tint
ila'! Asslst I'd Ut Tn: murder of The hostages.
iac3t Il very good fellow, Though, aud Inv
hulhcr-n-faw. Iut, Ut cuurse, III eantoEai
politics, when rut,r In the pulisy Ut NY IRE.
dect*sor IL reversed. II hu was elected tlicro
woull be similar atttun I'm his aldc." .4Wilat
direction tEoet ins chango Of pulley tskef" ~
VIII explain. For uauy ycars the euutQu l,as
been repairing the tuwn.haIl and cathedral.
Mhen atM ~ power J pusl. IN tho repairs of
hierarchy secures o'llce ile stups thr work and
repairs the cathedral, You SEE The lifyrrencefH
Yes" ~ forgot 10 add that 1t Is The sau,c
contractor who has the CONTRACTS tor repairing
ootn buildings TO the yieivrs belong tue
THE cONFEpEnACI's LAST CAP
lT.\L.
t1rss FEDERAL pniaNt<tr." IN PhiioattpAtS Ttmrs
!, Shreveport was the Inst Capital uf the Con-
|edcrats nation. Therc were assembled the
:'vil ~ well u the military genius of what WIS
e&t Of tue Contcderacy intact. There Sterling
ef'ee called Tom Reynolds "the pretended
b"Her"of OF Missouri" md Dr.. Kayanaugls
:alsd Reynolds IN cowardly deadhcal," snd
reynolds rallied Price ~ toddy.afpntpg pus-
!erer." Kirby Smith was accused Of coetoutny
70 The enemy, both In the stapls and the sur.
Fcnder, and gave over the command Of tho
|roops 70 Simon Bolivar Buckaes, Buckner
and Pree quietly went on to New Orleans
70 surrender the Department for Smith. and
len. Heron. appointed by Canby to receive
hat surrender, brought them both back on h,,
'tean!boat and also Ma1.-Gen, Brent, now Of
Maryland. lleFFoll's steamer was II the ai.
faIcs,-t"cnty steamers In all,-and, Is tic
2tnsr: 81! were dsepy laden with provisions ior
ow ~ateE and approached Shreveport ou an
Afternoon IN May, 1865. The scene on the
esee was 10 tunultuous that esen The Rebel
:,'tu'aanttr shraak buck, unwilling to leave
,thers had revoked agatns. ! surrender, aud aud
might, attavk this unarineA boat, aud thslr
lwn ttAtua was uncest4iu. Shelby was
sven theu drawn ur on tue prairte west
II Shreveport earnestly debating un assault
IN Heron. Price. BurSner. aud Bsent were
Syil educated, polite men, all Of some Nossheru
stl'liat1uns. thcS d1a DOT ~ ashore uuttI next
lay. Httron't nearest steamer. which conta,u-
ID troops. was nearly ! day beh.aa h,u. In tina
uncertainty Ut ordered TIE band to play, and |
lrovc UP to the y haFf LII The view Of full 70 dJU
lltued Dien looking III wonder Ut those lunely /
'sars aad stripes, anu all labberipg In the wlld-
st confusion.
'.l'll be .lesned," cried one fellow. .tf that
lint Gen. Heron up thtreI'
HerTou went a.hofe, aud this man etboEed |
hrough the crowd to h!m:
"General. what docs this meant Hsve we
"irs," said Heron, "you have surrendered. |
have GONE up 70 parole you aud give you some- |
hsng to eat. Ny transports Will be here pretty |
oon.h
The man jumped>upon bale oE cotton and |
made speech: "boys, this Is Gen. utrrun |
ou've ali heaz1 OF hiM In these parts. We've |
ufrsadcred!' lnuzza,i Gen. ilvsrot = here to |
ssae cur pafolts aud give Us transportation |
one, and GLORY bs " Godl 70 give Us SONG !