The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1877-08-24
ESTABLISHED 1889.

adead watch'-even that superstitious
pleasure was denied me.
There came a change, sudden as it was
alarming. The brain began tc throb.
The heart beat in unison. felt its deep
pnlsations; l heard its deep, heavy thud
against my breast. This, say, | heard,
for it was part 0fmyself No other sound
outside of my own person could have
reached me there. l felt a pain in nv
head and brain; not an ordinary pang.
hut one that struck at the base of reason.
Death was coming Welcome And I
laughed the wild unmeaning laugh of
the maniac. And yet 1 was not mad
Int so near it that had not reason told
me it was approaching apoplexy,T I would
have been raving. Welcome apoplexv,
II, however, came not. rolled over and
over in my limited cell l screamed; l
veHed and shouted for help, and yet all
the while was perfectly conscious of
what I was doing. Beath was playing
sith me! l prayed, too, but did not
curse. No, no; for if am to die--thus
reasoned---let me die in peace with God.
These thought, the results of my early
religious education, kept my soul intact
with him who had the best right to it.
I endeavored to be calm, strove to rea-
son myself into patience, and wait the
coming day Day alas what to- me was
day For here all was night. But rea-
son failed. It had no argument to con-
! fute facts Death was here and had to
meet it. But how! Alas alas that
mystery was yet to be solved. All was
50 still, 50 silent, that my faculties were
benumbed I remember wondering if
the voice of the Deity could be heard in
| that dreadful place. Was this blasphemy?
Perhaps it was; but was not then ac-
countable for either my words or actions.
I was, for the moment, mad.
took off my coat and made a pillow
of it. Sleep! OH if I could only
sleep, and, in forgetfSlness, escape the
horrors of my waking moments. Sleep
was impossible There was a constant
buzzing in my ears, acute pain in my
dead---a vertigo that drove me again to
my feet, and I reeled around the limited
space in a whirligig for life. struck
my head against the side of the safe.
felt no pain, for there was no madness
in my acts, with just sufi cient reason to
add to the horrors of my situation.
What could I do now but rave and YELL
calling for help, well knowing there was
no help at hand Why did my senses
remain TO torture me thus? Why not
90 mad and commit some fearful act to
end my misery? Because l was in the
against seIfslaughter. I trusted to
Him. I started to my feet. Ny head
struck the top of the safe, and was
dashed back again to the floor. Again
shouted, again laid fiat on my face and
called on death to end my woes. The
shout was echoed in low, rumbling
sounds, which died away, leaving the
silence tenfold greater. Like the dark
ness preceding some greater shock Of
nature, its intenseness could be felt.
feltit---felt it in my heartfelt it in my
brain---it was pressing me to death.
Had l nothing, else to think of but
myself Reader, 4 have given my own
mental and physical sufIerings while en-
tombed l was not selfish even; ana
lyzed my own feelings, and seemingly
forgot others outside of the tomb. What,
describe other sensations-4sensations that
sprung from pictures? 1 could not bring
my mind to contemplate. pictures of
home---of wife and children--friQnds---a
these seemed, in my state, as only adding
to my misery, for I am doomed, and they
were for the time being happy. ] kept
those pictures back.
even magnifed my suffering so Mat
memory might be silent. 1 could not
contemplate in my excitement two dis
tinet events. I therefore settled all my
thoughts, fixed all my energies on one
object self preservation. I would
strive to live-liye for those who were
even now wondering why l was not with
them. Reader, 1 strove as hard to for
get wife, children and friends, as I did
to master my dread of the horrible death
awaiting me. Understand me. No one
placed as l could think of the past, pres
ent or future with any degree of calmness.
The reasoning faculties succumbed to
physical excitment; they became an
tagonistic, and, although l endeavored
to separate the two, L became more
confused. 1 could think of nothing but
my own position. Beyond that, if l
attempted to go, 1 foresaw madness. So,
to avoid all that, I centered all my
thoughts on one purpose--self pres
ervatiOn. To accomplish this, l could
not even in thought, go beyond my
prison house. Why proceed--why even
attempt to descIibe the suferings I
underwent? 1 raved, I screeched, 1 fell
to the focr, rose again, reeled in mad
deniug fury around my living tomb. /
even meditated selfdestruction.
argued the point with death. Iquoted
authorities to prove that suicide was
iustifable in some cases, and mine was
a case in point. Ny mind, weakened as
it was, hesitated to grasp at this mode of
ending life, and there came up at that
moment, a small, child-like voice, saying:
Hope--hope onl' Was it voice, or
was it merely imagination conjuring up
sounds to soothe me? Hopper L
started a new light seemed to enter my
soul, and illuminate the Cimmerian
darkness surrounding me-the reaction
caused by the strength. lost all con-
sciousness, and fell as if dead.
How long lay thus l had no knowl-
edge. When l came TO myself it was to
hear a dull sound as if some one was
striking the safe. Was it help at hand
Then came a grating sound--then a
sbock--then came a louder sound, as if
from the explosion of gunpowder-a fash,
az of lightning. 1t came into the safe
and for an instant the whole space was
illuminated. What could it mean?
~. II a Il reaun 2 MOI no i---realitv The