Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1877-09-15
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

Roll-call-Ihe bakers call. !
A pair of tights Two drunh2rds.
A-veii-able spsce-A woman's face.
Hope deferred-Howard's promise
to whip Joseph.
Beecher is booked for San Fran
cisco April, 1878.
The Canton of Zurich, Switzer-
land, has authorized cremation.
A good way to kill f1eas-Ca.ch
them and hold them against buzz
saw.
The best thing to remove dandruff
Is Nez Perce." Isn't that dand-
ruff joke.
1t is hoped the War Department
will send Howard photograph of
an Indian.
An old lady wants to know what
is meant by "mean time" Cheap
watches keep it.
Those who bought $40 shares in
the Philadelphia Centennial show
will receive 81 rs.
The meelee- -mouthed orator has
had his jaw broken in an argument
with some working men.
A cynic describes marriage as an
altar on which man lays his wallet
and woman her affections.
Mckee of ST. LOUIS makes gen.
eral denial Of 1868 counts, and is
able to deny as many more.
1t is said the Indian ring is trying
to procure the removal of the Secre-
tary Of the Interior, Carl Schurz.
The Dental convention was very
harmonious. There was no pulling,
hauling nor jawing among the mem
bers.
There is no Office seeking the Hon.
Matt. Carpenter at the present time,
and he says he has retired from poll
tics.
An attempt will be made in Con-
gress this winter to secure a pension
for Ida Lewis, the Lime Book he
roine.
Edward Willett of st. Louis has
a comedy called "Our Politics" 1t
will succeed, should the public Will
lett so.
An inquiring individual writes to
ask show long cows should be milk
edf" Why, the same as short cows,
of course.
The great cafe in Venice-Flori-
ans, on the piazza of st. Mark-has
never been closed, day or night, for
$50 years.
A school boy, asked to give an
example of the comparative and su-
perlative degrees, promptly answered:
"Miss, mister, mistress"
A single house-fy, the scientists
say, produces 4,7s4,629 young flies
in year. Great heavens! What
would married one do9
Be constant in what is good, but
beware of being obstinate in any
thing that is evil; cons'ancy is vir-
tue, but obstinacy is "A sin.
"Gracious mel" exclaimed a lady
in a witness-box, show should |
know anything about anything |
don't know anything about9"
The surviving members of the gen
'uine Adams family are chiefly en-
gagged in writing memoirs of other
Adamses who have gone before.
Diogenes being once asked the bite
of which beast was the worst, an
swered "If you mean of wild beasts,
tits the slanderer; if tame, the fiat
terer."
There is talk of making Sitting
Bull Secretary of the Interior in place
of Schurz. As it is now the Ameri-
can Indian has no representative in
the Cabinet.
Saturday, July 7th, was the sew
enth day of the week. the seventh
day of the seventh month of the sew
enth year Of the seventh decade of
the century.
Professor Proctor predicts that the
Dipper constellation of stars will be
broken up in the course of 100000
years. Congress will take no action
in the matter.
George Washington was great
and good man. His memory is re-
vered. He has been on the tongues
of cultivated Americans since three
cent postage stamps became con-
wenience.