Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1877-05-23

snip OF state naru q Porte. Ha
If you tickle mules hind leg he
will laugh until he shakes your sides.
The dogs on Mount St. Bernard
saved the lives of forty persons during
the past winter.
Much of the charity that begins at
home is too feeble to get out of doors. =
Yonkers Gazette.
"A Pittsburgh man bought horse
by photograph, This is getting the
carte before the horse.
1t is the little things which tell.
Throw shot at a mans window, and
he is as mad as if you threw beans.
-" Everything is awry." exclaims
the poor man as he purchases his pro-
visions; "or, at least, everything is
arising"
"A schoolboy's idea is +" If you tap
maple you get strip, but If you tap
oak you don't get tapioca. Boston
Transcript. a
One swallow won't make a spring,
but nine grasshoppers out of every ten
do Just when you think yolI'v got
your hand on them. Worcester Press.
Experience is wise teacher, but
the man who feels a June bug creep
ing inside his trousers leg has no re-
source save in his natural ability
Rome Sentinel. 80
A Virginia girl, only nineteen
years Old, has gathered ton of sassa-
fras bark this year for shipment She's
the sassafrasiest girl in this Union.--
Detroit Free Press ahlaHa hHg y
Some people say that dancing is
not necessary to practical life, bat how
would things 60 did not business men
occasionally balance with their part
ners ?--Chieago Journal. ...
.--Scsntitic student Who is that
you speak of?' " Huxley" "Oh,
yes! Let's see, what did he lecture on,
nowY' Evolution '.Why, of
course, | had forgotten. He was--er
he was in favor of it, wasn't hep
Cornell Era.
The present elevated style Of bon
net has the great drawback that a man
who sits behind one in church thinks
he is hidden from the rest of the con-
gregation in church, and never puts
anything into the contribution box
NoJaOich Bulletin. . (
The time of year has come when
a mans wife asks him to take a length
Of stovepipe tenderly through the hall,
gently down the front stoop, coyly
across the walk, and knock all the SCOT
out of it at one bust without hitting
his toes, confound it!
Some idea of the extent to which
camellas are grown for sale near Lon.
don may be Cleaned from the fact that
one grower alone, near Hammersmith,
cut in one morning 325 dozen blooms,
all OF which were disposed of in the
London florists shops.
Military movements continue &C
tive over in the East. One section OF
Russian Generals name was pom
TONED across the Danube yesterday,
and if the pontoons can stand it the re-
naming sections will go over this week.
Men London Conn., Telegram. y
Farmer NJ Grab Dochter, an gle
ys hummer pown if yen keep me
livin' anither twalmonth. Amiable NJ.
D.. I'm afraid, Mr. M'Grab, couldn't
do it for that. l might try if you
made it 500 Farmer M'Grab (em.
phatically): I'd rather rather dee,-
Judy.
"A great eater at Suffield, Conn,
after beginning breakfast on recent
morning, by devouring sixteen eggs
with accompanying dishes, earned fifty
cents by eating four eggs more, one
and One-quarter pounds of beef, two
pieces of bread and two potatoes, and
drank two cups of coffee, his brother
in-law keeping tally.
1t was Southern Illinois man
who sadly remarked to his wife, rs she
stood by his dying bed: "Wife, you
be young an handsome yit, and rs I'm
goin' to leave, / 'spect nothin' else but
the next time we meet III have to be
introduced to yer agin. for ye'l II be goin
by some others feller's name then,
sure as guns"-Chicago Journal.
They were husband and wife. and
as they stood before the Guards Mon
ument in Waterloo Place, she asked;
What that figure on topY" That's
a goddess" he answered. And
what's goddess?" a woman who
holds her tongue" he replied. She
looked sideways at him. and then be
gan planning how to make peach-pie
with the stones in it for the benefit of
his sore tooth.
"A Pennsylvania who has recent
ly been laboring to get together mate
rial for a newspaper reporters direc-
tory thus gives the result of his obser-
vations: " / am convinced that the re
porters Of our great and glorious country
are the least egotistical class of beings
in this world. They don't take hold
Of the directory business worth a cent.
A. first | tried IN uef them tn nav fifty