The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1877-05-10

IL That
give tn
leon.
A MAN made bet that he could ride
a hywheel in a sawmill, and as his widow
paid the bet, she remarked, William
was a kind husband, but he did not
know much about hywheels"
" GoBANG" is the name of new Eng
lish paror game for children. In this
neighborhood the girls "go-bang" the
pianos several times day. 1t is par
lor amusement that everybody is tired of,
lT has been discovered that grass-hop.
pers do not like sorghum, and therefore
the farmers of Minnesota propose to raise
it, "just to spite EN-" There seems,
after all, to be fellow feeling between
the hopper and the rest Of mankind.
Very few people like sorghum.
OFT in Montgomery county, Oregon,
there is lady lawyer. She is, or was
married And the other day client
went to her office and found the door
locked, with the following notice pinned
up on the outside: "Gsne to my hus-
bands funeral; back in thirty minutes"
A WOMAN recently entered store in
Connecticut and sat down in front of an
iron safe to warm her feet. After sitting
some twenty or thirty minutes, she re-
marked that she never did like them
kind of s,oves-thcy didn't throw out
StnrtViy Jau,, pS any "'"'' '''''' s''.0"'"'''
'Onr y
The Rome sentinel says a young lazy
IN that city VINO is an enthusiastic re-
publican, named her canary, Dird jim
Blaine. lie ala not sing much, but She
leved him tenderly, until last saturday
she discovered that Jim Blame had lald
an egg. Now she declares 'hai no ue-
pen0ence can be placed on pohucian'
A PlTTsBURG paper speaks of young
man "who shot himself in the West End
one evening last week ~, mere Is noun
ing ike being eXpllcit. Inc young man
is severely but not fatally wounded Out
If he had shot himself IN the southwest
end, ana httle hoTtherly Veeflns sVuVh'
easterly, there woula nave oeeh ho nope
.ot his recovery
AN lrishman to whom some wonderful
story was told on the authority of a
penny newspaper, declined to believe it,
saying he distrusted all he saw in the
"cheap prints Nhy shouldnt you
believe the cheap papers" he was asked,
"as soon as any other| " Because"
was his ready answer, :" don't think
they can afford to speak the truth for the
money"
A LADY, prim and old-maidish, en-
tered bookstore on Broadway the other
day and said " Have you Gilberts
Theory for Mental Advancement?
"No," said the bookseller, but we have
Bill Jones on Wet Head Bandages i0r
the Intellectually Insane. Inc oId
maid waltzed out. she was the eldest
Miss Culture, of that artiticialIy intel
Iectual village called Bosting.
"a GEORGIA MAN." SAYS a paper of
that state, "the other day sneezed up
a cockleburr which he had been carry
inc around in his insides for thirteen
wears" If the western editors consti-
tuition for lying is as robust as ever, we
NAV soon expect to hear of Michigan
man ,neezing up a nutmeg crater which
he carried about in his interior for sew
.entcen wears. II Will never do for the
waSt ,o GOT in the rear of the south in
tbes. vS II tbins.
a WRITER in Scribner has an article
an tbo suhiect GLOW to keep BOYS on
tho farm 8 He evidently means well,
hnt Imt Jsaan,t touch the point. TO keen
b"r. "r ' on Tho torm the farm should be
Uol nolil nnved and LIGHTED with gas, and
%ara U q hand stand and billiard tables,
n"I' nnd 10 own bar and race course. We
home hon onr farmers are lust as anxious as
tbav onnear to keep their boys on the
s'uy sar; Ihrr hn, thew don't seem to take any
doGn;to oct;nn D1nJv,y Nsus.
''e e.%r " TtIp bahv has cot a new tooth, but
,ho old lodv i laid up with a cold in the
hnod tno 81 :" remarked gentleman to de.
= EoatDa &c. canJidote "What do | care?"
m"s u", tho renly "Well," said the gentle
r ',an wa, '' SIowIy "before the election you
r miar' ,,"od 70 tate me aside and ask me how
r u1vu ,,v family was coming on, and I've been
iyn,;nn hiy an yom all over town to tell you,
2 n.'i'ti ul w. a.: tSo wov Won talk to me. But
anu VnaV Io"" imo w. %d;aarence, voted for
IL uoii n'aAoI anuS;date ANYHOW"
the othef fSianim% EnmG,"t exon,site passage is
lhE uSaH iI,iT% W ali novel readers: " Her
comme,nueG - ,na,rous ~" ewes filled with
large, limpid, lus'iopT ,rI;ne leaned over
hig billowy tears Lurtihe ieaneu o'ei