The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1877-03-15
THE ORIGIN OF MAN.
An Ellis Street Infants Theory
Of Evolution.

San Frlncisto Chtonlelcl
One Of the delightful days Of last week
a young lady, well known In The exclu.
siye circles OF San francisco society for
unrivaled personal charms and ele.ance
oil accomplishments, was driven around
TO make u congratulAtory call upon A
married lady friend who was happily
conyalescing from that occasional sacred
event in the lives Of welded ladles,
which, far from being 4 sickness, IA ne
perfect elimination q their health. She
was shown into the parlor, and for the
lew minutes required to arrange for Inc
reception in that room where mother aud
child were doing as we'll as could be ex.
pected, was leftIwith no other to enter.
tain her than the only son and heir Of
the house, Master Charles, then in His
fourth rear. But Charles was fully equal
TO the situation, and promises to grow IN
into an ornament Of society that win
never be abaShed by beauty, however
brilliant, into the painful negative Of ano
conversation" After some unesseptial
preliminary remarks, Master Charles
approached nearer the visitor and, low.
ering his tone into the confidential, ask.
ed: ~
"MiSs =, 90 dot a baby?"
The young landy gave one swift glance
around 10 assure herself there was no
other hearer Of this pertinent question,
and replied:
"No, Charlie, dear, | have not"
And did 90 never have baby 2"
In spite OF the youth OF her eager inter.
locutor her handsome eyes dropped before
his ingenious gaze, and her pretty face
flushed as she replied:
"No, Charlie, never did. Is not this
beautiful day p
"And amt 90 never doin to have no
baby?" persisted Charlie declining to enter
on the tempting conversational sidetrack
Of the weather.
MY boy, | can't tell. Tell me ali the
napes'9t whom all these are the photo.
graphS."
"And don't 90 want baby?"
"Why, Charlie, what a close uuestioner
you are. II you are not careful you will
grow into one Of those newspaper inter.
viewers, and then what will your poor
mamma think Of you?"
Because" continued Charlie, utterly
refusing to be switched of, dI know
where 90 tan dit one. The doctor brought
my mamma one, and he keepth them in
hith otlith. You iuth do down Filth
thtreet TO Martet thtreet, and den 90 do
down Martet thtreet to Tarney thtreet.
and den 90 do down Tarney thtreet ever
tho far, and den 90 do up lot OF thairth
and thath where he teeps 'em. And
they're awful cheap, too. My papa
hathn,t paid for my mammals baby yet,
but beth doin' to-"
well, Charlie, Pm sure I'm much
obliged to you for your full directions,
and I'll know just where to CO."
"On, NTH, 90 needn't do. I'll
tell my papa juth ath thoon ath ever he
tums home that 90 want baby and he'll
Diet one for 90, and"
That young lady seized that little boy
by his two shoulders, and, leaning over
80 as to look full into his eyes, she said
with an impressiveness lent by sudden
terror:
"see here, Charlie, listen to me. |
don't want any baby yet, and If you ever
say anything about it to your papa I'll
never like you any more at all, at all,
never, never, never. Now, will you
promise ?1
"Well, if 90 don't want baby won't;
but | tot everybody liked to have bab.
ieth. l do"
The interview was here terminated by
the entrance OF servant to usher the
visitor into the presence Of the GONZALES
cent lady.