The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1877-03-01
Miscellaneous.

dentists sign-Drawing, music and
dancing
AJoint Committee-Two doctors work
ing over a sprain.
At q recent masquerade in Burlington,
Iowa, all the girls unhitched their teeth
to disguise their voice.
"Ah, parsoD, wish could carry my
gold with me" said dying man to his
pastor. 1T might melt" was the con-
soling answer.
Who are the most wicked people in
the world, and why2 Pen makers-be
cause they make people steel pens, and
tell them they do write.
A Detroit restaurant hangs out a sign
Of free chops" and when the old loafers
come around he shows them an ak and
a wood pile.
The Welsh word for beer is ''cwrw"
and the Chicago Journal says il is pro-
nounced "cooroo." This is too cooroo
ious for belief
Hone Of the saddest sights for these hard
times is TO see a woman with five foot
husband trying TO alter his pants to fit
her six loot son.
A white owl has built nest in the
dome of the California State House; and
the Legislature is now considering owl
they dislodge this rara aviS.
Say, mister" said newsboy to a man
with high shirt collar, yesterday, chow
do you manage to spit over that collar
Do you use a ladder 2''
Are blacksmiths who make a living by
forging. or carpenters who do little
counterfeiting, any worse than men who
sell iron and steel for living2
We have received an anonymous letter
in behalf OF tramps, and the author says:
Call me what you please" Well. sup
pose he is NJ. P. O. Nous.
They had Welsh concert in Utica
the other night. and when the choir sang,
"Yrl Arglwydd ywfy Mugail," the enthu-
syladdgsm was intense.
Don't neglect your penmanship A
man in New York got $4,000 from a
banker for being good writer. 1t is not
yet known how many years he will get.
1t has been officially decided that the
reason why law book is like a frolic-
some ram jtmping over a fence is because
they are both boundin' sheep.
Country editors, it must be admitted.
are not generally towards But not one
of them dares advertise prize for the
best Ode to Spring"
Tr.Lo n .ouu;. ID . i'll ~ s.,z.--... a :: l.
they can break this paper by not giving
us pass, they are mistaken, unless they
have conductors that watch the back end
OF the last car.
The great English gun is pronounced
cracked, the reason being that il was not
thoroughly bored If it had been placed
in an American newspaper Office, the re-
suit must have been very different.
A Kentucky girl who would like to
change her name is struggling under the
paradoxical cognomen OF Helen Hevven.
Hope she won't marry a man named
Brymstone.
Here fix up the Constitution so that a
man will have the privilege of shooting
the fellow who asks for light from his
twenty-five cent Havana, and hands back
the stub of penny grab.
Mr. Talmage has preached about law
yers and editors and doctors, and his
congregation is confident that if he lives
long enough he will yet preach some
thing about religion.
Jennie Cooking in at a milliner's win
dow y Don't you think they are very
pretty p Lizzie (whose thoughts were
on the other side of the street)-"Very.
especially the one with the long black
sic wh:skers.'
Theatrical creditor Ito Theatrical
ManagerC Il don't believe you ever met
one OF your bills in your life" The
atrical Manager: Wrong. my dear boy,
! never go through the streets without
meeting one.
The Louisville Courier Journal touches
up kentucky editor to the effect: mo
no. It's not egotism, it's only his way of
talking. When he might say, 1t rained
here yesterday, he says We were pleas
ed TO see it raining in our town yester-
day"
A contemporary says: Our exchanges
are badly cut up about the political situa-
tion, as IL stands. That's nothing
Every exchange that comes into our
hands is pretty sure to be badly cut up
before we're through with it.
Everybody has read the story of Hen
derson, the man who last summer swal-
lowed a cherrystone, which, refusing to
be dislodged, has, while in his stomach,
grown into a small cherry tree. The
man who wrote the story is a relative OF
George Washington, who refused to cut
the tree down.
The palindrome is line that reads
alike backward and forward. One Of the
best is Adams observation to Eve:
Madam, I'm Adam" Another is the
story that Napoleon, when at St Helena,
being asked by an Englishman if he
could have sacked London, replied:
able was / ere / saw Elba." Years ago
might have been seen in California a
street sign which came very near being
an excellent palindrome. 1t reads: IS.
Gillings-Yreka Bakery. Now try it