St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1877-08-17
My Silk Umbrella.
THE MISHAPs AND THE MATCH THAT IT
MADE.
From Harper's Bazaar. |

From Harper's Bazar.l
When Marcia came home from Europe,
she brought her pretty trifies for every
body-cOral for these, and canoes for
those, and cairngOrms for the others
and she brought me silk umbrella. |
had half hoped for a picture, bit of
bronze (being hOusehOlder), maiolica
platter. What in the world do YOU
suppose Marcia brought me a silk UNI
brella for?
No shabby one, either, let me tell
you. The silk of the thickest, the steels
of the stoutest, and the handle wonder
of sculptured ivory. To use /? | should
as soon have thought of going out in
the rain with my new silk hat as with
my new silk umbrella. A silk umbrella
for man who had never aspired to an
alpaca one, and who had always held a
fifty cent cotton one, that could be left
and forgotten, lost and stolen, with i'm
punity and nobody grievously wronged
thereby, as the king of all umbrellas,
and who never carried an umbrella any
way, but in rainy weather wore a
macintosh
Still, as umbrellas go, it was beauty.
1t would give an air of distinction to
to ones appearance, armed cap-a-pie,
faultlessly dressed even to the umbrella
Being an amateur farmer in a small
way, it became me to be seen well
dressed when l left home. Then it
would look finely on the rack in the
hall. 1t would be nice thing to lend
lady going from the house in a shower
"a nice thing for her to forget to return,
too. That reminded me; | shouldn't
lilo 70 nf} II I -
marked that was only proper respect
to Marcia. A neat little silver plate,
the jeweler said (nickel would hardly
suit so fine an article), engraved with
my name and place-Only two dollars.
Already the price of four umbrellas.
When the silk umbrella came home,
| hung it, in its case, on the rack but
one of several irresponsible single ladies,
who take more or less interest in my
affairs, assured me that to keep it hung
up in its case would occasion it to split
in the folds. | took it down and spread
it wide open on the floor of the dark
cloak closet, when another of the ire
sponsibles-and l don't know how un-
der heaven she knew it was there-as-
sured me that my umbrella would be-
come One-sided cripple if l left it
spread wide open on the floor. | began
to wish | had never had an umbrella.
| took off the case, shook loose the folds,
and hung it up unmolested by the
others.
The next result of my possession of a
silk umbrella was that, conscious OF my
resources, | lent my macintosh, and
the person to whom lent it was drown
ed in it; and had previously given
away and recklessly lost all my fifty
cent umbrellas. When, then, in driz-
zling weather wished to tramp through
a field and visit the outlying dependen-
cies of my pig-sties, it seemed altOgeth
er too incongruous and unbecOming to
hang over the pig-sties under silk UNI
brella with IA carved ivory handle and
engraved silver plate, and consequently
| went in the rain, caught cold, had
the pneumonia and a doctor and a re-
ceipted doctors bill for fifty dollars, and
no strength to speak of for six months.
| wished Marcia had brought me no
present at all.
l had been looking forward, for some
time after my complete recovery, to
Marcia's wedding and my journey to
Waterway. Marcia was not only the
sole millionaire of the name, but she
was my favOrite cousin, engaged to
marry my dearest friend, and the cere-
mony was to be performed in great state
by DR.. Wilder of Brentford, an old
clergyman, the dearest friend of her
dead father and of mine. OF course |
was to make my best appearance, and
of course my old housekeeper insisted
that then | should take my umbrella. l
demurred for it was very much in my
way, with my portmanteau, my rugs
and my wraps, and the box holding my
wedding present. But she carr led the
day, and took it.
AS soon as | was in the cars that day,
| comfortably disposed of my personal
property in various barriers around me,
and enjoyed the morning paper, till
suddenly the Junction was called, and
1 started up in hurry to make my
connection. Satisfying myself when the
change was made that | was in the
right car, l began again to dispose of
my membranes, when-where was
my umbrella? | had left it behind me-
L was not going to give that silk UNI
brella to the potter of any train on
earth. had just time to spring off one
train and back upon the other, when
away they both shot in opposite direc-
tions, and | and my umbrella were on
one train, and my valise, my wraps and
rugs, and wedding present, were on the
other. Did | bless Jonas Hanway and
his great original umbrella? And the
price of how many kings of umbrellas
was there in the ticket l was obliged to
buy for a place to which | didn't want
to go, to say nothing of telegram at
the first station concerning the disposal
of my traps!
Fastening into the station and setting
down the umbrella, had written the
message and was just paying for it,
thinking the while with regret of the
scenery we were to pass through, since
the only way to save my umbrella was
to keep my eye fixed on that, when the
cry came, "All aboard !" | threw down
the change and ran.
"Your umbrella, sir" cried flute
like voice.
''Hang the umbrella !"
l stepped back for it-One seconds
delay. In that second there was Just
enough steam on to whirl the train out
of the station, past hope of overtaking.
Strongly inclined to pitch it into the
middle of the track, tucked my UNI
brella under my arm savagely, and
wheeled about, only to tear off with it's
ferrule the top of basket that the
owner of the fiute-like voice was care
fully carrying behind me, and away fled
two white doves in the air, and vanish
ed in the blue.
turned at her exclamation. ga thou
sand pardons ~ l exclaimed. "What
shocking carelessness! Were they pets