The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1877-09-15

fluid which surrounds the earth, and
presses by its weight the assemblage of
eriform vapors. Here was no air--no
Wpor, no motion, no sound, atmosphere,
to produce either of these agents of the
universe. No! Death was far away, yet
| felt as if the very silence was killing
me. The buszing of afy, the hum ola
bee, or the sound of that mysterious in
sect whose peculiar imitation of a
time-piece gives it the name of the
dead watch"-even that superstitious
| pleasure was denied ME.
There came a change, sudden as it was
alarming. The brain began to throb.
The heart beat in unison. Ifelt its deep
pulsations; I heard its deep, heavy thud
against my breast. This, say, 1 heard,
for it was part efmyself. No other sound
outside of my own person could have
reached me there. I felt a pain in my
| head and brain; not an ordinary pang,
bat one that struck at the base of reason
| Death was coming! Welcome! And I
laughed the wild unmeaning laugh of
the maniac. And yet I was not mad
but so near it that had not reason told
me it was approaching apoplexy,I would
have been ravipg. Welcome apoplexy!
1t, however, came not. IrolIed over and
over in my limited cell l screansPd I
yelled and shouted for help, and yet all
the while / was perfectly conscious of
what I was doing. Death was playing
with me! I prayed, too, but did not
curse. No, no; for if I am to die--thus
| re~asoned---let me die in peace with God.
These thought, the results of my early
religious education, kept my soul intact
with him who had the best right to it.
| e%ndeavered to be calm, strove to rea-
son myself into patience, and wait the
coming day! Day alas! what to me was
day! For here all was night. But rea-
son failed. 1t had no argument to con-
flute facts. Death was here and I had to
meet it. But how! Alas! alas! that
mystery was yet to be solved. All was
80 still, 80 silent, that my faculties were
benumbed. I remember wondering if
the voice of the Deity could be heard in
that dreadful place. Was this blasphemy?
Perhaps it was; but I was not then &C.
countable for either my words or actions.
was, for the moment, mad.
/ took off my coat and made a pillow
Of it. Sleep! Oh! if I could only
sleep, and, in forgetfalness, escape the
horrors of my waking moments. Sleep
was impossible. There wa a constant
buzzing in my ears, acute pain in my
dead.--a vertigo that drove me again to
my feet, and I reeled around the limited
space in a whirligig for life. struck
my head against the side of the safe. |
felt no FOR there was no madness
in nay acts, with just sufficient reason to
add to the horrors of my situation.
What could I do now but rave and veil,
calling for help, we'll knowing there was
no help at hand! Why did my senses
remain to torture me thus? Why not
go mad and commit some fearful act to
end my misery? Because I was in the
hands OF One who has issued his canon
against selfslaughter. l trusted to
Him. I started to my feet. Ny head
struck the top of the safe, and I was
dashed back again to the floor. Again I
shouted, again / laid fat on my face and
called on death to end my woes. The
shout was echoed in low, rumbling
sounds, which died away, leaving the
silence tenfold greater. Like the dark
ness preceding some greater shock of
nature, its intensenezs could be felt. I
felt it--felt it in my heartfelt it in nv
braln--it was pressing me to death.
Had | nothing else toy think of but
myself2 Reader, I have given my own
mental and physical suferings while en-,
tombed. was not selfish even; 1 ana
lyzed my own feelings, and seemingly
forgot Others outside of the tomb. What,
describe other sensations--sensations that
sprung from pictures? I could not bring
my mind to contemplate. Pictures of
home>-of wife and children--frisnds--all
these seemed, in my state, as only adding
to my misery, for l am doomed, and they
'were Tor the time being happy. J kept
those pictures back. 0
| even magnifed.m my suffering so that
memory might be silent. / could not
contemplate in my excitement two dis
tinct events. | therefore settled all nv
thoughts, fixed all my energies on one
object-self preservation. / would
strive to Twelve for those who were
10 wondering why / was not with
them. Reader, | strove as hard to for
get wife, children and friends, as [ did
to master my dread OF the horrible death
awaiting me. Understand me. No
as | could think of the past, pres
emit or future with any degree of calmness.
The reasoning faculties succumbed to
physical excitment they became an.
tagonistic, and, although / endeavored
to separate the two, I became more
confused. / could think Of nothing but
my own position. Beyond that, if /
attempted to go, / foresaw madness. So,
to avoid all tkat, I centered all my
thoughts ~, nno r,rrnso cae -.