The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1877-11-22
Dressing the Baby.
Philadelphia World.

with his hair combed, his clothln
in ship-shape order, and ter
dollar chrome under his arm. This
all comes from knowing how. With
a man it is different. He make:
elaborate preparations and puts on
the air of one who is getting an
eighty-four gun ship ready for &
two years cruise. He collects the
youngsters duds together in q
heap, gathering them up from pref
ty much al over the house, and
after a great deal of bawling for
this, and sharp, swapping inquiries
Tor that, and a limited amount OF
getting down on his knees and
looking around under the furniture
for the other Gall of which came
from his having undressed the child
the night BEFORE he at length sits
resignedly down in a chair, and,
with feeble attempt at good-n
ture, says:
"Come, Freddy, come to papa, and
have your coses on
Tho child, who 10 just Jnen trav-
cling around in his night dress, and
playing with damp towel and
a stove wrench. makes a bee line
for the door, full of desire to es-
cape into the next room.
Come, Freddie, come to papa,
like a good boy" says the father
with a brave effort at patience.
The child keeps on his course.
"Fred.'
This sounds so much like bust
ness that the youngster stops,
turns, and tacks slowly up to the
now stern browed parent, gradually
gets within reach, when a stubborn
grab of his arm brings him into po-
sition, when the damp towel
slaps around on the fathers clean
shirt front, and the stove wrench
pumps solidly down upon the very
top of his boot.
Immortal Juliusr' he screams in
agony, nursing his foot with one
hand and shaking the poor limo
cent with the other; whereupon the
innocent sets up an accompanying
yell.
A voice from below where the
wife and mother is busy with get
ting breakfast, joins in the chorus.
"Olmstead Molleson, what on
earth are you doing with that childF''
"Oh, you be darnedw goes back
the quick reply, in a short, ugly,
desperate howl that silences all fur
ther inquiry.
Then the father, after rubbing his
foot and grooming awhile, squares
the child around and begins the
process of dressing him, which is
most y made up of dreadful strug-
giles between clumsy fingers and
smooth porcelain buttons, general
misplacing of garments hindsiJe be
fore and upside down, searching
after the missing articles, and talk
like the following;
"Turn around! Stand STILL!
Hold you arm up! Thunder and
lightning! Can't you let things
be? Stop reachingl Hold your
head up! Up, l say! Can't you
keep still! Where's that other,
shirt? Shut up! Let go! Blast
that button! Now, where in the
blazes is that pin? Stand up!
There! Ny thunder! Why don't
you fall down and be done with it,
Stop your howlingl Stop! Ouch 1!
Devil take the pin! Let that be-!
Behave! Great scat? Say, why
don't you have four or five thous
and more buttons on your clothes?
Now, where's that stocking? Keep
your foot still! Say, keep-your
-foot-Still! By jove in Jerusa-
lem Gimme that other foot! No,
the otherl Can't you see? Sane
titled Solomon! what do you want
to spread your toes all out for?
How do you suppose I'm going to
put your stocking on with your
foot in'that shape? Stop it! Stop
it, / say! Prov wow e-e-u!
Who stuck that pin in that way?'
"You, of course" says. a cold
thin, cutting voice; and he glances
up and sees his wife looking down
on him in a taunting, exasperating
sort of way. "Pd be ashamed of
myself" she continued, "to 90 on
in that way and get ont Of patience
with little bit of baby You've
been making noise enough to wake
the dead, and his clothes look as il
they'd been thrown on HIM with
pitchfork. Gimme him"
And he gets up sheepishly and
sullenly and after slRmming and
stamping around the house after the
liuiment bottle, and banging doors
and making as big noise as he
can, he works himself up into such a
state of meanness and modification
that to spite himself he goes off
down town without his breakfast.
Eve inaugurated the fall fashions.
Bunches of autumn leaves are
novelty for hat ornamcntation.
Pearl buttons an inch in diameter
are worn on black dresses.
Feminine toilets win be decidedly
masculine in many details this win
ter
Round lace collars, with a bit of