The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1877-12-29
VARIETIES.

Christmas festivals make the little
ones happy.
The letter to which bachelors seem
most inclined-Let 'er be-
"A Delaware Judge has decided that
cider is an intoxicating liquor.
"A man walked sixty-five miles to
Troy, Ala, to revel in the circus.
Among japanese doctors shampoo
ing is a remedy for rheumatism.
Old adage adapted to the tramp
Strolling means gather no sauce.
An Oregon girl eloped with man
who died while on the wedding tour.
"A serious man may not be proven
bal for wisdom, though he be solemn
I'm.
One of Hoods lines describes the
belle of the period: Fashioned so slen-
Derby"
Olive Logan says no English home
servant will do the washing and ironing
herself.
President Hayes says he would favor
unconstitutional amendment giving wom-
en- the right to vote.
The mania among fashionable
women for decorative pottery grows
stronger every day.
The Burlington HaWb-Eye speaks
of small boy who twas no stronger
than good resolution.
-" Men should be careful lest they
cause women to weep, for God counts
their tears" says the "qlmud.
-" Moral force is never lost" OBJ
serves contemporary. The same can
be said of broken bladed pocket-knife.
"A New York court has decided that
wedding presents are the property, not
of the husband and wife, but of the wife
alone.
The Russian Emp, ess is a good
seamstress and could make Alexander
pair of pantaloons if he were to ask
her for them.
"A patent broomstick, which can be
reconstructed after being broken over
delinquent husbands head, is the latest
invention.
The Women's Christian Temper
ance Union of Massachusetts, expended
$4,000 the past year in carrying on
their operations.
"A New York dramatist is writing
play to be called the Savings Bank"
We predict for it a tremendous rum
PhiJadelphid Bulletin.
"A young Connecticut lady was late
ly taken aback when her swain got upon
his knees before her and read declara-
ton of his love, which he had nicely
written off.
Various plans for the cure of stam-
mering are going around among the
newspapers. The groundwork of all of
them seems to behold your tongue.
-Eveming Mail.
Every woman who marries should
have some idea of cookery, but the truth
is that nine in ten who marry cannot
tell whether icicles should be cooked
with their jackets on or otf.-N Y. Her.
aid.
"A Lancaster County man saved the
life of a mule that was dying from collie,
and the mule returned the compliment
by enabling the mans wife to realize
on his insurance policy.-EaSt0n Free
Press.
Before deciding to marry poetess,
meter and scrutinize her feet. After
scanning her, if she prove in measure
well versed, and not averse to you, you
canto the mark forever after-if you
will.
-Tantalizing-To see a love of a
bonnet in a milliner's window and not
be able to buy it. More tantalizing-
To see little darling gazing longingly
at the bonnet and not be able to CRAFTY
her.
The man who didn't know it was
loaded tried it on his own hand in North
Carolina the other day, to show that it
wasn't. He blew his hand to pieces,
and the ball lodged in the neck of the
other party.
1t is said that at three years old we
love our mothers; at six our fathers; at
ten our holidays; at sixteen Dress at
twenty our sweethearts; at twenty-five
our wives; at forty our children; and at
sixty ourselves.
"A st. Louis widow has had three
husbands. She has on hand lawsuit
to break the will of the first, another to
recover the insurance money on the life
of the second, and a third to obtain ali
mony from the last.
"A man may elude disagreeable
creditor for long while sometimes,
but there's one thing in this uncertain
vale of tears he can't dodge. When a
sneeze has business with fellow it
always finds him at home. breakfast
Table.
1t is said there is something noble
in honorable poverty, and there is hard
ly an editor in the country who does
not feel himself loaded to the muzzle
with laurels of this glorious but incon-
venient Observation-Disclosures Ha,0k-
Eye.
Every morning the ghost of
busted bank-o-rises in Chicago. The
papers there keep the article set up all
the while, leaving blanks to slip in the
name of the fiduciary institution and the
name of the country to which the Pres
ident has departed.
Mems hats, coats and vests are
worn by ladies who are understood to
illustrate the fashions of the day. 1t is
expected that gentlemen will break out
in low-neck and short-sleeve coats early
in the spring, and will have their front