The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1877-06-28
SENSE AND NONSENSE.

SENSE AND NONSENSE.
HE who lives to no purpose lives to q
bad purpose.
EARLY to ryes and late to bed-the topet.
-Philadetphia Eullssin.
Riches, though they may reward vir.
tues, cannot cause them.
An excuse Is worse and more terrible
than lie, for an excuse is . lie guarded.
Pope.
The Cincinnati School Board didn't
decide to repair and erect new build
ing" though one of the members pro-
posed It.
WE don't care astraw what Shakespeare
says: " rose by any other name'' would not
"smell as wheat" Make an oat of this.
-Nosristosen Herald.
HARK! Is that the r-r-r-racket of the
moving machine? It isl it is! Sur
geons, COroners, undertakes and report
ers, come and view the rcmains!-Detroit
Free Pysss.
1.-THE little darlingl he didn't strike
Mrs. Smiths baby ON purpose, did he? 1t
was mere accident, wasn't it, dear ?"
Yes, ma and if he don't behave himself,
I'll do it again."
DISHES with mirror bottoms and sides
are getting to be the thing with festival
managers. They make one strawberry
look like four or eight, and three make q
heaping dishful. Chicago Journal.
TOMORROW Gen. Grant dimes with the
Duke of Wellington. If he eats all the
dinners they're preparing for him he'll
dine with the Duke of un-WellingtOn, too.
before he gets through Commercial Id
vertiser.
PROBABLY there isn't half q dozen
hired girls in the United States who don't
know which are their nights "Out," but
the man isn't born yet who can point to
one who can explain how the nose of the
water pitcher got cracked-Fulton IN. ~
Times.
MRS. QUINCEss advises young men to
marry the women they love, and to love
women not cause they are han'sum or
know how to play the pianer, but because
they can cook, an air satisfied to eat q
plain dinner and hev an idee of the valy
of truth.-Yonkers IN. ~ Gazette.
:. A SOUTHERN editor speaks of chickens
being born.-Bostoa Adrertissr. Well,
the dictionaries define birth as looming
into life," and the "SOuthern editor !"
can appeal to them, if necessary. Boston
editors, of course, may stay in their little
rut and say "hatch" if they choose
C0urier-Jonrndl.
II TELL you, SIR" said DR.. - one
morning to the village apothccary, II tell
you, s.i, the vor populi should not-must
not be disregarded." "What, doctor!'
exclaimed the apothecary, rubbing his
hands. "You don't say that's broken out
in town, too, has it? Lord helpus! What
unhealthy times these are !"-Boston Id
Uerttse7:.
A MAN arrived in Buffalo lately, with
his mother, for the purpose Of putting hi +
In an insane asylum. After doing so, his
own conduct excited suspicion. He said
his anxiety about his mother had made
him nervous, and that he had not had his
regular sleep for several nights. He was
kept at the hotel over night, and the next
morning was raving maniac.
THE nest Of humming. bird is thus dc.
scribcd ly y Californian: "It is about
rs large ut the top Us a half dollar, and is
made of spider webs, downy feathers,
with fibcrs of bark and shrctls of cotton,
all interviewer. The eggs, two in number,
were about the size of small white beans,
and the young birds, before they were
flcdged, resemblcd humble bees"
Ir is customary for the managers of
State and county fairs to offer premiums
for the best patches sewn by young ladies
and girls. We think we will make q
little change in the programme and offer
a large reward for the discovery of any
real nice young man on a salary of less
than 500 year, who will wear Il coat or
pair Of trousers after they have been
patchcd.--Bariingtoa Hack-Eye.
VERMONT is a little ashamed of her
Fhair case, but she offers what little repa-
ration she can, by claiming the champion
scoundrel of the day. He is about Eighty
years old, and has just been arrested for
poisoning two hogs belonging to neigh
Dor. His claim to the belt does not rest
on this crime, however. 1t appears that
during his four.scorc years OF life he has
been killing cattle, burning buildings and
destroying property generally. Only last
year this venerable wretch was convicted
Of girdling fruit.trees, and escaped State.
Prison by FORGETTING his bonds. He has
cost the State of Vermont, his family and
the community generally, more than any
other man in it.-Detr0it Free Press.
SOME housing archaologist has dlscov-
cred the origin of the "leathcr medal"
and redeemed it thereby from the obloquy
into which it has fallen. Sometime in the
fourteenth century, King John, for the
ransom at his Royal person, promised to
pay Edward III. of England 5000, 900
gold crowns. In order To fulfill this obi.
CATION he was reduced to the Notifying
necessity of paying the expenses of the
palace in leather money, the center of
sbnSs 1<.ss1 Asnt
In this he found the origin of the bur.
lesque honor called comforting leather
medal" The imposing ceremonies accom-.
dignity and value To the leather jewel,
which even noblcmen were proud to re.
ceivc at the hands of Majesty.
A BLUNT correspondent of the Manches-
ter IN. H. AtsrOr says that if New En-
gland farms have run down the people
who occupy them arc long way ahead in
the race. 1--WE have got ON our farms to
day a class of people who can cipher
through the algebra, play the piano, and
boast of an acquaintance with the fine arts,
but they can't work; They have got fine
minds, but their bodies are sickly, puny
and weak. To talk the matter plainly,
we have bred the bone and muscle out of
our families until we have got o kind of
human Jerseys, fne- boned, mild-eycd and
nice to look at, and pet, and put on exhi-
bftion, but so tender and weak that they
are fit neither for our climate, our work,
or our circumstances. Asa farm.
ing people we are played out" The cor
respondent thinks it would pay young
farmers to look out for wives among the
healthy German and Irish girls of the
large cities, who will know how to intro.
duce industry and frugaiitY into the farm.