The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1877-08-06
FRESH FLASHES OF FUN,

Latest name 1ur bachelor--A Sir
single.
A Yankee has patented an electric
| lock. Would.nOt thunderDolL answer
the same purpose?
Maybe "you can't make a silk purse
out OF sow's ear" but you can make u
purse-proud fellow out OF an ordinary
pig Herald p. 1.
A little girl, recently, while watching
the rain, turned to her mother and said:
"Ma, guess the weather's SO warm IT'S
melting the Clouds"
Serenade: "Home, Sweet Home, dah
am no place like hOme.' COlored lady
git along home or Ill frow somin."
A Michigan father writes TO the fac
ulty Of Yale: "What are your terms for
year! And does 1t cost anything extra
II my son wants to learn to read and
write as well as to row boat"
'she is perfect Amazon" said a pu-
pill in one oil our schools OF his teacher
TO a companion. YES" said the other.
who was better versed in geography than
history, II noticed sue had an awful big
mouth"
How must a young bridegI DOM feel
when, just as he PROMISES to endoW his
bride with all his worldly goods, he
sees three of his tailors sneaklng and
dodging around the church door with
| things that look aWtully like capiases in
their hands.
We read that "Mars will, on Sept. g.,
be only thirty-tve million miles from
the earth." low to prevent a collision
| on shat day between Mars and the fash
| ionabIe shlrt-collar is the problem now
| agltating Richmond philosophers
LRlcnmond Enquirer.
A professional, man, returning to his
office one day, alter a substantial lunch,
SAID compIacently to his assistant, "Mr.
Peetkin, the world looks different to a
man when he has three inches OF rum in
him" "1es," replied the junior With
out moments hesitation, sand lie looks
different to the world"
She was from Boston, and when she
saw the little saiib0at bObUIng up and
down on the waves she TUNED Lo her
companion and said: ''On, direct your
eyes 10 that cunning marine craft OF
immature proportions, Wnicn is SO pre- l.
lilly bob-eXcuse me, Rvb4rling On The
waVesV'
First fisherman: "Wot was the lady
sayln' 10 yer, BiliyW Second F..
Wants to paint my picter. Never
moved | was SO 'aneome HlUrt |" First
F.: Thought I'd seen Ter somewhere.
that's Mauame TJosoJ! Want yer in
wax tor tue cham er Of ;orIorA p Lon
don Fun.
A telegraph op orator, not far from
BOst n, received telegram for an ,isl.
man tIom girl whom he had preViu 45 ly
hEn
come and spend a Holiday WI,u her. lie
sent the message, and received thu to-
lowing answer; II am marria I'd, and TO
me griei."
The Russian army is very scantly
supplied with bands, the men marching
to the music Of their own sougs. We
should think WhtH a man had been com
PEELED to listen to Il Russian song he
would want tJ fight somebody if he had
to walk one nunaIed miles TO find the
man.
Tyndall can deny spontaneous genera.
ton as strongly as he likes, but when a
Rome woman finds seventeen flies in o
der a Wiie screen and locked in a re-
frigerator, she wants higher authority
than Tyndalps to pin toll Rome SEN
tinel.
"That's my butcher" said an actor to
friend, at The same time pointing TO a
lean, cadaverous-!o ooking nan just pas =
"Does look bad :" was The reply. 81 oks
as II you had dealt with nlm a long time,
doesn't heT" The subject WIS immedi
ately changed.
Scene: An Irish police court. The
case: the charge Of exposing unsounU
meat Tor sale. The Local inspector OIL
provisions Is giving evidence. Gro So
DeXaminer: $40 you swear that the
COW was killed, or that 1t Jiad natural
death?" Witness: II swear she, as
killed to save her lfe."
A young man in Lower Colo Hill VS.
tied his sweetheart, aDd When he left
stole the dog OF The house, and got hnil
a dollar tor thg brute at AlarohaI Nc
CleerJ's Canine Asylum. A man can
not afford 10 spend his time for nothing
these hard times, not even when court.
ng, says the God Hill News.
Good-looking young man who has
called at the house on business: ~ re-
gret, Miss, That your iather is let at
home. had an important propDsai TO
make to him.' Young lady oI the house
uemureIy: "WeIl, perhaps, you could
MAKE your proposal 10 me; ! am olsen
gagged at present" Good-looking Young
man excuses himself alu rerlres in con-
fusion.
"When does a man most feel the value
Of true wilep asks an exchange. We
can answer tnal. Ii is wnen lie wakes
up writhing at 2 A. N alter clamiril-
ter seance at COUeE Island, aa1 unds
the ange OF his household Standing by
his bedside with "a benIgHant smile OF
her countenance anu u sevea- yen'granL
mustard plaster III her 1and.-[N. Y.
Com. ADV.