The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1877-05-22
Sense and nnpse,tse.

as sore tuunU. -Omdia OUituary
Somebody suggests blowing with dy-
Mantle. This is enough to make horse
laugh. g,..s
The early bird catches the worm.
which it would not do, of course, if the
worm was awake. s,s.fl sr...-.-s, ii
We recommend that the officers of
life insurance companies be supplied,
with bell punches, -gff,. sf.4- .,.,,.,,e
Every year increases the size OF the
circus as well as the sighs ofathose who
cannot afford to attend, ,,.....4 =
The French painter, Leon Belly, is
dead. Here is, a chance for the Fat
Contributor to explain himself. {.
"First in war. first in peace, first in
the hearts of his countrymen." That
Washington was q good man.
Humanity is good deal like cake =
1t does not always follow that because
cake is not rich that it is not good. iissa
One of our Wall Street friends wants
to know the difference between the day
rate of gold and the nitrate of silver.
Mr. Bowles says Prof Riley, of Mis-
souri,, is the first srasshopper scholar in
the country. A low euss of scholar.
Prof. Proctor says the earth is grow.
ing larger. We are glad to hear it for
real estate has shrunk fearfully in the
past three years. a!stt !tFa .oI '.a9a'e
H"De new preacher is mo- larnt dan
Mistuh Boles was but, Lor' bless you,
Sab he amt got de doleful sound like
Mistuh Boles had No, ibdeedy."
The cat is not mentioned in the Bible,
though the word "roof' occurs eleven
times, "tongs'' five times. ard ''hurl"
three times. The boojack had not then
been discovered. FL ~ 10 lf 2ti
There are people to whom their neigh
boris things appear to be greater than
their own. This is observable more
particularly when they are borrowing a
chew of, tobacco. ,
A school master asked q class what
Shylock meant when he said, s.My deeds
upon my head" aWell," said one Of
the boys, 81 don't know, unless he car
ried his papers in his hat
At a restaurant the guest called the
waiter to him aud remarked, "This
goose with wine sauce would be most
palatable but for a slight mistake-the
age is in the goose, and notin the wine"
A Maine paper has an editorial head
ed, "Why young men leave the farm"
We think it is because a farm is cum
brous and inconvenient thing for young
man to take along with him Cincinnati
Saturday Night. .f9s e
At the marriage of an Alabama wild
lower, one of the servants was asked il
his master would take bridal tour
i"Dunno, Sab: when old missus's alive,
he took paddle to her; dunno if he
take bride to de new one or not"
Charles, playfully, elbow much really
did that hat cost, Jennie2 ?" Jennie,
archly, "H you really want to inspect
the bills for my dry goods, Charles,
there is a aoay to do it." And what else
could Charles do but propose on the
spot lT yGg ,va6g0lst fs4fh
When you see a woman looking out
of asecond story window, and she has
patches of whitewash all over her. hair,
while her husband in the backyard is
transplanting her winter geraniums top
side down, she will7soon have the call
on him aEfo i*el 4aef s7a 9dH jlig!n
Mrs Murray had no spoon. for her
soup, and called the attention of the
servant to the faeta The maneseryant
. replied TO his mistress, ina a voice which
was heard all over the room, ''Mum, the
last time Mrs. Murray was here, we lost
a spoon 5aaiaRg8og espaAG Iaivae
, A locomotive engineer, who was dis
charged for some iicause, gave vent to
Ibis spite by saying that it was about
time he left the Company anyhow, fol
the sake of his life, ''there was nothing
g left of the track but two streaks Of rusl
= ana the right of way.' 7i 1ud7ifH
! "A young man who mistook bottle
9 OF varnish for d bottle OF hair oil, con
9 cluded that dancing was a frivolous
: amusement, and kept away. from a mas
Iluerade ball But when inquisitivt
, friends asked why he staid away, ht
told an unvarnished tale. g '1@ psi'
II man has got to be poor, the glat
I spring g-time is the time to be so, A MAJ
. doesn't know what to eat, and find,
! great difficulty in eating it. This is th,
! season when your wife is more anxious
3 : than ever to ask, Just as you rise iron
U breakfast, what you want for dinner.
aiItis told that Mr.. Caleb Cushing
great delight is to go fishing; further
more. that work lis his idol, his rest
change of work, His income as law
q yer in Washington used to be- not les
than $4,000. He returns there now t,
practice his profession at 73 years o
age.
'sMr. Jones, don't You think wome
are more sensible than men p aske
Miss Smith !, And Jones, after scratch
ing his fayorite bump for. moment Q
two, said; "Why, certainly they are
1they marry men, and men only MARI
women. Puck
,e Music has wonderful power owe
ut the passions The man who couldn
e set tub out under the caves to cato
s. raiawater for his wife without grumblin
ii in most profane way, stood for ha
he hour in the rain without an umbrell;
I'd and listened to the minstrel band o
e the hotel piazza with a face in docle re
lg pose. a;galI -.4..f1I a. 49,. ID.
to Buffalo and Chicago are to have
telephone experiment A Chicago gi
will stamp her foot so that the Paine
House will rock to the center, and
r.. Buffalo girl will wag her ear in ecstas,
w while chimneys are blown down an
ae trees are rooted up as by cyclone, an
he exclaim that they are playing Wagner
IA Die Walkuere. g3si.s} as
lis A gentleman called at a large station
ot er's 10 order some note-paper with
be heading. On being shown various d
DIS signs, moncgrams, etc, he said, "No,
ol want something simpler-just iowe
he such as forget-me,not." "But, 81