The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1877-05-10
How Woman Gets Even with Her
Landlord.

There is q woman on May Street who
last year received mortal offense from
her landlord, and took solemn vow to
be avenged upon him this spring. She
has, besides, a housekeeper's mortal OBJ
lection to having the unfriendly eyes OF
other housekeepers inspecting her do
nestle arrangements consequently she
manages to kill the two obnoxious birds
with the following stone: When wom-
an calls to see the house, she takes her
mental measure instinctively. If the
woman is thin Tipped and combative, she
assumes meek look, and when with a
disdainful sniff the visitor says to her
companion, in stage aside intended to
be heard, "Shiftless creature! Half
past 10 o'clock and not a breakfast thing
washed!'' The housekeeper smiles tim
idly and alphabetically, and says: ''I'm
sorry I've got to show you through the
house when it's mussed up so, but the
fact is my three children are lying sick of
scarlet fever in that room, and the SER
want girl (she does her own work) has
just been taken sick and removed to the
smallpox hospital-you must have met
the ambulance; it hasn't been gone
more'n ten minutes-and so I've been
compelled to sort of neglect things"
Then the thin-lipped woman and her
companion light out with celebrity, say
ing to each other, 80, / know the house
won't suit!n and sDid you ever in all
thescourse of Your whole existence?n
If a timid looking woman calls she
gives the signal to her daughter, child
of h,,f
as to be of untold assistance to her
mother, to upset a few chairs while she
is at the door, and then say cordially to
the visitor, 80, do come in. My hus-
band-may you never know how sharper
than a toothless serpent it is to have a
husband that drinks-thinks that he is
Sitting-Bull, and has painted himself
from the mustard-pot, and has got hold
of the meat-ax and is cavorting
around scalping the furniture, but he
never hurts any one. The sight of a
strange face kinder soothes him.
Comet" The timid woman doesn't. If
the applicant is motherly sort Of wom-
an who brides herself upon her position
in society, the housekeeper insists on
being shown the permit to view the
house, and, on receiving it, says, go,
that's all right, but my landlord warned
me that a woman with a wart on her
nose, or a boil on her chin, or some
other distinguished mark (Which the
visitor possesses plain to all mems
views) just like you-a very common
looking person, he said-was proving
round pretending to want to see houses,
but really trying to get impressions of
the key-holes for gang of burglars, and
| didn't believe but what you were herr
The woman doesn't go in. Sometimes
the vigilant householder asks mysteri-
ously if her visitor has grown-up
daughters; and being answered,
in THE affirmative, says 2 3ssI'm
sorry then checks herself sud-
denly. Of course the visitor asks why
she is sorry, but the householder says,
go, it is nothing; but people sometimes
like to know all about the neighborhood
they are moving into,' and endeavors
conspicuously to turn the conversation.
The visitor goes away, filled with
vague unrest and nameless terror, and
doesn't take the house. Sometimes she
imparts to her visitor, with many tears,
if her visitor be accompanied by a child,
how she lost a child of Just that age and
sex, and how her predecessor did, too,
and adds that of course she isn't super
stitious, and there may be nothing in it,
but she thinks it shame that so sweet
a child should die, and altogether she
scares the visitor into clasping her pre-
cious babe to her bosom, and beating a
hasty retreat. By a thousand innocent
stratagems of this sort she is keeping
the landlord without a tenant, and he
will never get one while she is in the
house Chicago Tribune. .5srJ..-s asp.-
Glad He Knew His Father.