, 1877-02-03
LEGAL Wit.
ECCENTRICTTIES OLA LEARN
ED PROFESSION.
HumoR OF the BENCH AND BAR.


that is natural. and not readily suscept-
ibJe of cultivation. Yet the avOcation
of lawyer lie one which requires readi
ness at all times. An opportunity lost.
is lost forever. In the bar vf the Old
World. the lamented John Philpot Cur
ran stands pre-eminent over all the
men of his era. for repartee. Of all
men in the legal profession, in America.
Charles O'Conor is the quickest. On
one occasion. he was in case where
the opposing side was represented by
two men of undoubted talent, Daniel
Lord and his son. Daniel. They were
for the prosecution, and when Mr.. o.
| COnor rose to state the case
FOR THE DEFENSE.
He went over the same ground as young
Dan. ell Lord. using almost the very Ian
guage used by that gentleman. When
he had finished, he added. "That is the
case, gentlemen of the jury: as MIR.
Daniel Lord would have you believe"
Daniel Lord. JI.." replied the other,
in an unearthly scream. 'Ah. l beg
the gentleman's pardon" said Mr.. o.
Conor with freezing dignity, 1.-THE gem
tleman is commonly known as Lord,
Junior, in contradistinction to the AL
mighty" O'Coner had once case
against John Van Buren,. and it was
"pattle of the gods" as far as repartee
was concerned, but even Van Buren,
was unable to cope with O'Connor's
merciless satire.
AN OLD FARMER
OF Kinderhook, who had known John
Van Buren, from his boyhood, once
went to employ him in suit. but was
told by "Prince John" that be was al
ready engaged for the other side of the
case. When the trial came on, Van
Buren poured in perfect fusillade of
ipvective against his ia hers old friend
and pictured him as anything but an
honest man. When the case went to
the jury. Van Buren, was walking on
the porch of the Court House with
some friends. The old farmer came up
aud said. John Van Buren. l think
you would take fee from the d-dest
rascal on earth" "Of course, replied
John, land, by the way, what have you
been doing p
JAMES T. BRADY
Was leading criminal lawyer of New
York in our boyhood days. 1t was he
who wrote the favorite Irish song Of
Pat Malloy" On one occasion he
provoked a quarrel with brother bar
rister, who challenged him to mortal
combat. But Brady did not believe in
dueliing, SO he declined to give him sa
tisfaction. One night while Brady was
standing in front of clubhouse on
Broadway, his enemy came up and pre-
sented two pistols with the butts to-
ward Brady. saying Here, you id
coward, take your choice of these"
Thank you," retorted Brady cody,
IN take them BOTH" He snatcEec
both weapons at once and kept them
several days, but negotiations for the
duel died right there.
BANKRUPTCY CASE
Under the old act, prior to the passage
of the National bankruptcy law. &once
took place in Red Bluff, California,
while we lived there. The ''packara-
pu," as they say in Australia, was Eu-
gene Howard, afterwards well known
at Walla Walla and Boise. He had
string of debts longer than Don Giovan>
nj IS roll of conquests and wanted to be
discharged from paying them. So he
went to Joseph Cocmbs. a well-knowD
lawyer of the place who agreed to get
him through the horn for fifty dollars.
He told Howard to make out his sche-
dule of debts, which was read in Court;
but before Sam Bishop got through
reading it. Howard says
''LET's GET DRINK?"
Coombs and Howard went out and got
a julep, returning just in time to hear
the Judge ask if there was any reason
why Eugene Howard should not be dis-
charged from his debts. There being
no cause shown, the Judge directed the
entering of an order discharglng the
said Eugene Howard from his debts.
The next dav. Coombs says Eugene.
got that fifty about your c.othes?"
..What fifty?" asked Howard. why,
the fifty dollars for getting you through
the mill" Il guess you didn't read
that schedule. replied Howard.
| Coombs went over and read the sche-
du!e, IN which he found himself in>
cuded among the other sufferers by
howard's chronic impecuni osity.
EDWARD DICKINSON BAKER
Was the Admirable Crichton. of our era.
No other face blazed with such royalty
Of intellect, no other eye ever cleaned
with such lordly presence, as his. One
day he made speech at Forest Hill, in
which he said, Talk of masters mercy
to their slaves-you might as we'll talk
of the mercy of the Nnmidian lion"
He pronounced the word Numidian as
if it were spelled "Numidjen." The
next week. lawyer named Jim Damer-
on was arguing a divorce Case before
Judge Myers and said. "What. give
these little children up to their brutal
father? You might IS we'll commit them
to the mercy of Norwegian lion!'
JUDGE REDMAN,
Of Santa Clara, was one of those amia-
BILE fossils whom primitive civilization
- x1,a D.oL,A. la-oh