Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1877-10-10

-lcuralSlc affection.
a few short weeks more and tho ice
chest may again be used as Il reocpta-
Gle for old hats and boots.
Every dog has his dav." and. nc
corning to the ika California. Every
cat has It's night"
The man who can count mn ciphty
men rs bis warm personal friends
should, before dying, start out some
day To ask the loan of s.. DetyoH Free
Press
\ Missouri paper called II man an
old fool, when 1t meant Ia say "old
friend, He apoloeized in his next. but
his = fool-iriend doesn't feel exactly
satisfied.
newspaper in recording wreck on
the North river says; While the storm
was at its height, the vessel kelced to
the larboard, and the captain and
another cask of whisky rolled over.
board.
Il want five cents worth of starch"
said little girl to n groccr's clerk.
The clerk asked; What do YOU want
five cents worth of starch for ?" "Why,
for five cents, of course" she answered.
and the clerk concluded to attend toll
own business
What do you think of the eight
hour law ?" inquired one workman of
another who had made his mark and
won II position in life. Il think" was
the reply, that no man ever made any
mark in the world who didn't work
! eighteen hours"
The Philadelphia Chronicle yclls out
III agony, What is going to become of
the last MANI We don't care II cent
what becomes of the last man. or the
! first one either 1t is what is To be-
come of the intermediate fellows that
Interests us.-Doiy Ueujck
! Montgomery Sears, of Boston was
married II few days age, and gave his
bride Il wedding present of residence,
costing $4,000 Mr.. Sears, we under
stand, Is not newspaper paragrapher,
and some persons may be ut n loss to
know how he accumulated so much
wealth.-No,riSoaa HeyoM.
Works of art and science are thrown
away on some people. At Washington
world, but there il not woman living
who would not sooner peep through
kcy-hole.
Why is it that "A paragraph in any
way connected with n game Of poker
will be recognized and appreciated at
once, while Joke with n good moral
point travels rs economically ~ Il plum
Der ut work by the day Bridgeport
Standard
At recent dinner party an argu-
mentative person, posted on the Eastern
question, asked his innocent young
neighbor, Now, Mr.. ----, what do you
think would be the effect Of protocol
upon Turkey" well, really pro.
fcssor," replied the youth, bracing up
and looking ut the plate before him,
I've never tried it, | think III try
Worcestershire sauce on mine
A little girl went into II neighbor's
house one day, where some apple-pair-
ings lay upon II plate on the table
After sitting awhile, she said, " ! smell
apples" Yes" the lady replied, l
guess YOU smell those apple-parlngs
on the plate" "No, no. said She "tis mt
them | smell; smell whole apples"
Two persons were once disputng so
loudly On the subject of religion that
! they awokc II big dog, which had been
sleeping on the hearth before them, and
! he forthwith barked most furiously. An
old divine present, who had been qui-
city slipping his tea while the disputants
were talking, gave the dog II kick, and
exclaimed: Hold your tongue, youl
silly brute you know no more about IL
than they dor
A young man fresh from school who
sits the editorial tripod does not handle
the pronoun ave" with the graceful
facility which is bern Of experience.
and sometimes Of common sense
Says the embarrassed editor Of the III
gafor, IL new paper at Lockport, Ind. !:
" If we should not get out our next mum
Der on time, my subscribers must not
become impatient"
They are taking evidence in divorce
case for cruelty; the husband is under
, examination; his wife, Frustrated with
grief, Is weeping bitterly, covering her
face with her handkerchief. Now"
, says the judge, are you not ashamed
to have thus brutalIy treated your wife,
n tender young woman OF twenty-five"
The wife suddenly raises her head, Il
beg your pardon" she sobs; twenty
four only, and she again gives way to