The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1877-07-21
VARIETIES,

and steel.
Farmers are now minding their Ps
and Qcumbers.
Men whose business drive them to
wall-Bill-posters.
-EX-Postmaster- Gen. Jewell is in the
hide and leather business.
The man who is generally behind
hand-The card-player.
Florida is expecting many settlers
from the West this fall
The Philadelphia mint proposes to
strike tifty-dollar gold coin.
Trim your white Swiss dresses, fair
ones, with Colored torChon laces.
The woman with her hand tied up
is an index of the preserving season.
Most of the papers implicated in
printing war maps have tapered off.
= The average measurement of the
foot of Chinese female is four inches.
"A little girl described an elephant
as ga great big thing with its tail in
front"
Six hundred and twenty-six lawyers
keep San Francisco from getting OBJ
streperous.
In Utah 10000 wives are distributed
among 1900 husbands-three-tent of
husband apiece.
1t was woman who first prompted
man to eat, but he took to drink on his
own account afterward.
There are two women in the Kansas
State Prison under sentence to be exc
nltp1 for tho I'd 90 10 i.
The original" Molly Mcguire was
poor woman in Ireland who mad her cot
tage pulled down over her head by
cruel landlord.
Archery is said to be coming into
fashion, and young ladies are all in a
qulver at the prospect of beaus being
plenty this summer.
"A photographer who can make
mole on lady's cheek appear like dim
pie in her picture has achieved the high
est standard of his profession.
"A scientific paper says dynamite is
found to lose its strength as it becomes
old" 1t ought to be taken before it
ceases to ettervesce, we suppose.
A century plant at St. Augustine,
height of twenty-one feet, and is still
growing. 1t has twentY-four branches.
Young Miltiades Spilkins promises to
become joker in time. The other day
he labeled private bottle that his father
keeps in the side. board: Par'snips."
"A Boston merchant forgot the num-
Der of his store on Washington street,
which he had occupied for a number of
years, and is the most laughedat man at
the Hub.
Observe a young father trying to APP
pease crying baby, and you'll witness
enough ingenuity in ten minutes to make
you think that man ought to be an in
ventor.
Alphabetically New Hampshire
paper says that if it devotes more space
to the potato bugs than to the Legisla-
ture, it is because the bugs are doing the
most work.
"A Massachusetts man recently paid
off all his debts and became insane. A
dreadful, dreadful warning. But then
he must have been a little insane to be-
gin with,-HaaOkEye.
-" Young men of the middle ranks
are getting so shy and hard to catch that
parents will have to begin to offer
chromos along with their manageable
daughters" says the Turner's Falls Re
porter.
"A daily paper advertises for woman
to scrub a hotel, and Immediately below
advertises for two or three young men to
learn to make fringe and buttons. Do
let us have some nice, light work for the
poor menl
-" What is the meaning of back
biter?" asked a gentleman at Sunday
school examination. This was puzzle
Invent down the class until it came to a
simple urchin, who said: Perhaps it is
1ea."
"A sagacious Newfoundland dog at
Meriden, Conn, instead of rescuing a
small boy from pond, deposited small
boy IN the pond. The youth had tried
to steal the sagacious Newfoundland's
new muzzle.
One of the most remarkable chal-
lenges ever issued comes from "a siX-foot
five-inch man named Frank Prince, who
offers to bet that he can swim from St.
Louis to New Orleans in 800 hours, actual
swimming time.
Gail the worlds a STAGE" he rumi- !
mated, "and all the men and women
merely players, and most of the plays are
from Shakespeare, too! Before we were
married Julia and l played Romeo and |
Juliet, and now it's mostly Tempest. ,"
"A boy while fishing in Lake Butts,
Wis, the other day, felt nibble, and |
drew in half-gallon fruit can In it he
found large catfish that had taken up
his abode and lived there until his in
creased dimensions did not admit of |
egress.
"A Kansas school-marm has intro |
duced a new feature in her school. |
When one of the girls misses word the |
boy who spells it gets permission to kiss
her. AS a result the girls are becoming |
very poor spoilers, while the boys are
improving.
The Mayor of Chattanooga having
recently advertised for three new dog |
catchers to perambulate that city, 750 |
applications were put in in one day, com
po11inoe tho funCtionaru IN bapoe ~, an hi |