The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1877-12-27

the pea-green man whose weak mind
was SO paralyzed with establishment.
that he lay under Dams weight for
some time before he recovered suffi
GENTLY to crawl out.
Here cadaverouS looking man.
with d prim face, Il profound look and
a ramrod back. who had just been de-
feated for the legislature, soffered the
following:
.'Resokred. That this convention is
in favor Of building a court house at
Pennington.
This was hailed with stamping and
| clapping Of hands by 4 few bank
| clerks. but it fell coldly on the au-
] dience.
| One man rose and Sa:d that he
should vote against the resolution not
! because it might ne supposed there
was steal i'll it. but because the steal
would be limited to few persons.
Whenever d steal produced 1.-The
greatest good to the greatest num-
| Der it broadened into an act Of
craftsmanship. but these steals that
only enriched a few persons were all
wrong. The parties benefited usual
ly establish a bank and loan their
profits at II per cent. per annum to
! the very men who were as willing to
steal as they were. This was all
wrong. Besides that, court houses
cost too much in Dakota county.
They were building better looking
court houses, than the Hastings one,
in Anoka and Wright counties for
$25 900 and we all know what the Has.
tings' one cost.
Here a raw-boned chap from Farm
ington. named Davis. got up.
"Gentlemen,' said he Il speak as
president Of the Pennington bank;
the greatest financial institution in
the United States; the peer of the
Bank Of England and the superior of
the Bank of France. for we can make
more interest off less money than Ell
ther of them. You probably all know
me by reputation. | am as big a man
as Bill LIE Due. am the man who
discovered the new method Of pre-
venting a COW from switching hel
tail when you are milking hel
her i'll fly-time; to wit, to cut
the tail off. | am radical, which
means one who goes to the root o.
things; and hence | went to the roo
of that cows tail and rooted it out
1t is true the cow died, but the inven
ton was brilliant success. Sh,
never switched her tail again.
have taken out a patent for the inven
ton, and | am now trying to breed
!. race of cows without tails. I hav
written to Hayes that he SHOULD
fashion his southern policy upon m
great example. What we want il
this country is the free use of tn
knife and free flow Of blood =
blood blood! Cheers and az
V plause.
) "Now desire to second the motto
d Of my distinguished friend of the Do
) Quixote cast of countenance, for tn
l. building of a court house at Farming
d ton. / realize the force of the obje(
e ton that it might be made close
t poration affair. No man is NOR
IS opposed to steal that he hasn't
: finger in than l am. Great applaus
g and cries of ''me too all over tn
h hOuse.j But we can fix that. pre-
n pose that the Peoples Party b
It organized as joint-stock corporation
Is each member to be entitled to on
!, share of stock, and an additional shar
IS for every ten dollars he contributes t
d the political fund of the county; an
/ the profits Of the court house to be d
l. vided share and share alike betwee
/! Us all"
Rapturou sand prolonged applaus
IS followed this equitable proposition.
How much profit said Davi!
addressing the cadaverous mar
"could be made ION such coul
II house1'
properly built. and under tn
q. charge of proper superintendent, t
1T handle the money!" replied the cada'
" er, ''about 100000
" There was rustling of paper an
a scratching of lead pencils all owe
le the room; all hands were engaged i
,u1 dividing S250,OOO by. the number (
in those present. When the calculatic
IN was made there was terrific cheering
Id Now comes the question: sal
Davis, "who is to handle the money!
a The cadaverous man arose.
"Gentlemen." said he, 'sin view
at the fact that introduced the resol
IL LiUii. IL WOulu Stcu1 proper CndC
should have the handling Of tt
s; funds
A howl went up at this. and tt
e whole convention grew pale in I'll
Mt face at the mere suggestion.
l "HoW would | do :" said Irwin
Todd.
Of you! oh Lord, you'd fetch us in
debt. Shrleked the crowd.
lie "Our Dan" rose with an insinuatin
er smile. and asked, s'How would d.
s. gentlemen!'
~ 1--WE want no more Northern Pacif
v IN ours, responded the crowd.
to By this time every member Of til
convention was on his feet urging b
t. own claims for the place; faces gre
I'd red and arms began to move in
ID belligerant manner; and the CONVEX
n ton was on the eve of general fire.
OF fight: when the man who had cure