Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1877-09-01
CONIslINECATED.

Friend Zittle-Are the Dog-Days
over? This is the problem that now az
itates the literati of Harpers Ferry.
The question has been suggested by the
grateful coolness consequent on the long
expected rain of last night for which
We return our sincere thanks to you, old
Gruber, Horace Greeley, Old Probable
tiles and all other astronomers and al
manac men. There are as many differ
ent opinions on this subject as there
were last Fall concerning the Grammar
of the Tilden banner and, at later pc.
Rod, about the etymology of :Curtail
and Cocktail" | was taught that the
Dog Days depended, not on the preva-
lence Of swapping ours and hydrophobia
but on the rising Of Sirius the Dog Star,
but rs my friends think am never Sc
RIoUs there is little attention paid to
what l say. I own very sagacious
and intelligent dog. He is the pet of
an eccentric and not unkind master. l
have trained him to philosophy TO
which he takes very kindly although
the particular sect that he appears to ad
mire is not the one to which | am par.
tial. The stoics were always my favor
ties, to which fact may be attributed the
unfailing good humor and patience |
exhibit in every relation of lite-ospeci-
ally in listening to the well-meant alb
surdities of my Democratic friends. |
have, long ago, adopted the "Nil admi-
rari, but it is evident that my dog
takes different view of lite. lie is an
Epicurean, and | am sorry to say that
his tenets are not those pure, elevated
ones which distinguished that sect orig
inally, but those that were held at la
ter period by the degenerate disciples
of Epcurus, and which unjustly link
that great mans name with the idea of
luxury aud etfeminacy. No one who
notices my dogs breadth of beam and
the many folds of adipose matter that
envelop his frame can fail to understand
his philosophy, and if there be any
doubt, let the skeptic once see him turn
over and gnaw bone or turn up his
nose at bit of dry unseasoned bread.
Thinking it natural that he could tell
me about the Dog-Days, l propounded
the question to him when the manner in
which he skipped and froliced around
me and jumped on me, the many intri-
cate gyrations of his tail and the other
manifestations of bis satisfaction con-
WINGED me that he considered it GALL
DAY" with HIM and holiday at that. My
dogs experience being evidently excep-
tional, / must exclude bis testimony,
and now who is it that can tell when
those days begin and how long they
continue? There is an Irish school
master here who has theory on the
subject that may Well astound you as.
tronomers, and that will Gf it be true)
render an immediate revision of the
calendar indispensable. His opinion is
and he quotes very old proverb to
support it-that ''every dog has got his
day" If this be true then indeed the
dogs own the whole year and not only
that but taking Harpers Ferry and
Shepherdstown and the road between
these places and leaving out the rest of
the world, | doubt If you can find day
for every dog allowing six thousand
years for the age of the world and not
forgetting the additional day for Leap
Year.
The question ought TO have been pro.
pounded at the late examination of
teachers, but it so happened unfortu-
nately that the school-master above re-
terred to was one of the Board of Exam
liners, and his well known conceit and
tenacity of opinion would be fatal to
free discussion of the subject among the
teachers who might naturally fear that
conflict with his settled prejudices
might endanger their certificates. Then,
again, friend Hess, our excellent Coun-
ty Superintendent, is unacconntably at
tachcd to this visionary Irishman, who
returns the kind feeling with compound
interest, and as long as they constitute
a majority of tribunal there is no use
i'll discussing before them any PROPOSE
ton distasteful to either.
We look to you then, friend little, to
throw some light on the subject You
edit an almanac that runs hundred
veors backwards or forwards-I forget