, 1877-01-13
CLERICAL WIT.

V66uluVN6 VIII
TALES OF THE CASSOCK AND
SURPLICE.
THE RARE HUM0R OF THE CLOTH.
The profession of q minister of the
Gospel, is one which the common mind
invests with supernatural solemnity, IT
not absolute severity. Yet moments
reflection will convince US that there is
no solid reason why ministers should
not have their tun like other men. They
have the passions of all poor humanity,
tempered only by the study and devo-
ton which keeps those passions in SUBJ
lection; they have the appetites of other
men and not few of them possess q
slight inclination toward foppery. We
knew, once an army officer who wi
fondly devoted to beautiful wife, many
years his junior. While stationed on
one of the outposts of the frontier of
Nevada. this lovely woman was called
upon to undergo the terrible ordeal of
maternity. A few days of
INTENSE SUFFERING,
And the lovely woman was carried to a
grave on the lonely hill overlooking,
the little canp. Her babe, bereft OF
natural sustenance. fingered few days
ard was entombed beside its mother
The father grew moody and disconso-
late till, at last. he resigned his COM
mission and went East. Next time we
heard of him, he had become an Episco-
| clergyman and two years ago he
visited San Francisco. But the swagger
of the sword cropped out from beneath
the gown; and when, in speaking of
those who would throw temptations in
the path of innocence, he poured forth
all the vehemence Of positive nature.
we fancied We could see
THE LIGHT OF BATTLE
Flashing from his fine brown eyes, AZ
though he were ready to exclaim "Up
boys, aud at EN-" So it is with man
whose matt re is that of wit or hu-
morist; no matter what he espouses as a
vocation, his hpmor will crop out on
more than one occasion. And why
should clergyman be devoid of humor?
Your airabllarious ecclesiastic whose
enlarged spleen fills his face with the
hue of saffron, can never make converts;
the only successful laborer in the VIZ
yard of the Lord, is the pleasant man
nered man who has the hfe-blood of a
generous nature warming his features.
He need not be joker, but he must be
A GooD-NATURED MAN.
Such one as this was the Rev.
Mather Byles, of Massachusetts, about
the outbreak of the Revolution. He
once went into grocery store to get a
mackerel for his breakfast. Several of
his neighbors were in there, taking q
little 'black strap" before breakfast
One of them looked up and asked Doc
tor, won't you take some hing with us?"
"Cer. .ainly," replied the divine. "Well,
Doctor, what will you t.ke?" continued
the gentleman. II guess I'll Ike q
mackerel," replied tie reverend joker,
booking one by the glls with his fore
finger and leaving the other man to pay
for it.
REV. ROWLAND HILL,
To whom tfe world is mainly inie'
for its cheap postage system and, p@.'
consequentiam, for its cheap newspapers,
was a man "of infinite jest" He knew
that an ounce of rldicule was worth q
ton of abuse and never reso ed to the
latter. In his later " RS he rode to
church in his riage. He got an
anonymous letter rebuking him for this,
because it was not t, eway his heavenly
Master travelled. He read the letter
from the pulpit, and said that it was
quite true; and that if the writer would
come to the vestfy with saddle ard
bride, he would ride him home.
REV. SIDNEY SMITH
Was notorious wag, in his way. He
had fearfully solemn manner of utter
lug his scathing sarcasms, which only
increased their humor. On one occas-
ion he was invited to large dinner party
in London. given in honor of some for
eign Literary celebrity, at which there
were many notables present. After an
hour or two of pleasant conversation in
the parlor, dinner was announced. When
the guests had become seated, the host
turred to Sidney Smith and said my
dear Smith, will you be kind enough to
invoke the Divine blessing?" "What.
is there no other clergyman present."
inquired Smith, "None, l assure you, p"
replied The host. With an air of aw-
full solemnity, Smith raised his hands
and said
LET Us TIL GoD!"
One of the rarest wits of the Ameri :
can pulpit, was DR.. Francis L. Hawks,
of New York, formerly of Holly Springs.
Miss. He died several years ago. He
was a very extravagant man and though
he received salary of $1,000 month,
he was eternally in debt. One day he
called the vestry of his church together
and asked that his salary be increased
to $4,000 year. One of the vestry-
men, Cooley, who wrote the American
in Egypt" said deprecatingly Doctor,
you should put more trust in Provi-
dence. The Bible says that the Lord
shall feed the young ravens. THAT s
very true, retorted the Doctor, "but I
defy you to show me any part of the
Bible that says the Lord will feed the
young Hawks"
JOHN KEESE
Was the great book auctioneer of
New York and about Christmas times