Lyon County times. [volume] (Silver City, Nev.) 1874-1907, 1877-04-14
OFFICIAL PAPER OF LYON COUNTY.
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

He runs we'll who uses croton oil.
Retiring early will shorten ones
days.
Look out tor April showers about
this time.
Senator Newton Booth has returned
to Sacramento.
Saloon bummers need more fresh
air and less politics.
An old landlord says hotel clerks
should never marry.
Ben Butler is ominously silent
Look out, somebody.
As an entertaining study phrenolo-
gy stands at the head.
Turkey is barely able to provide
her army with aour and rice.
Bismarck will be contented with a
four months leave of absence.
April showers in Hamilton, Ncv.,
come down in "beautiful snow"
A Russian in Austin, New, is named
Observation-Disclosures.
NEVER turn blessing around to
see whether it has dark side to it.
Notwithstanding her troubles, Pat
it's notes are said to be as good as
ever.
Singularly enough, old rye is sew
enty cents bushel and twice that a
bottle.
Brigham Young grants divorces
for $40. and warrants them to stand
in any climate.
Truth kan take kare of itself, but
lie has got TO be watched as kare-
ful as sore thum.
Alphonso Karr says women guess
everything. They never make mis-
takes unless they think.
An English NJ. p. who knows what
he is talking about, defines alcohol
as "the devil in solution"
Nearly every paper in the State of
Maine has already nominated Blaine
for the Presidency in 1880.
We will soon, in this telegraphic,
telephone age, be able to talk by
lightning and swear by thunder.
"Emigrant Gapl" said the conduc-
tor. They started up on their elbows,
and obediently the emigrants gaped.
Grasshoppcrs, by their eggs, are
making hatch-ways for the "ships of
State" of Iowa, Minnesota, Nebraska
and Kansas.
81 hate parties at our. house." said
little Tom Whifet, "because for days
after we have to feed on what was
left from the supper"
Joaquin Miller has found the wo-
man who succeeded in living by her
pen She resides in Cincinnati, and
it is a pig-pcn she lives by.
We seem to have in this country
many gentlmen of leisure who pub
licly indulge in the luxury of sun
bath at almost all hours of the day.
The papers telephone story about
a Cincinnati man who attached wires
to music-box and made friends be-
lieve the music was telephoned from
distant city.
VI make it point, madam, to study
my own mindl" said man to lady
peddler. "rhen you need one of
these microscopes that magnify one
thousand times," she sweetly said.
"Smith's deadl' said Timkins.
"Now cried the amazed Phlunke,
'"what was the matters" "Consump-
tion," answered Timkins, "and, poor
fellow, this will be the longest coffin
spell he ever had"
Who that ever reclined under the
outrageous branches of the sage and
watched the sportive jackass rabbit
igamboling on the hillside, or con
templatively munching the tender
'sprigs Of bunch grass, will forget de-
lightful Nevada.
snow, my young friends, can you
tell me who Leonidas wasp "Yes, sir;
yes, sir; he was member of the
Legislature" And what makes you
think he was member of the Leg
islature, my children2" Because,
sir, he held pass with Spartan firm
ness.
A lady in Rome, New York, who
is an enthusiastic Republican, named
her canary bird Jim Blaine. He did
not sing much, but she loved him
tenderly, until one day she discov-
cred that jim Blaine had laid an
egg. Now she declares that no de-
pendence can be placed on a poiti-