The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1877-01-19
Marx twain on Yankee Weather. ?

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1 Responding at the New England dinner
to the toast of q the Oldest Tnhabitant the
! Weather, Mark Twain delivered one of
his after-dinner speeches, of which the
following Il an ABSTRACT e5x79s
6 reverently believe that the Maker
who made MS all makes everything In New
England but the weather. i don't know
who makes that, but think it must be
raw apprentices in the weather clerk s
factory, who experiment and learn how in
New England for board and clothes, and
then are promoted to make weather for
countries that require a good article and
will take their custom elsewhere if they
don't get it. daughter. There is .
sumptuous variety about the New England
weather that compels the strangers admi-
ration-and regret. [Laughter.1 The
weather is always doing something there !;
always attending strictly to- business al
ways getting up new designs and trying
them on the people to see how they will GO.
But it gets through more business in spring
than in Any other season. In the spring |
have counted 1856 different kinds of weather
inside of four and twenty hours. Laugh
| ter. It was I that made the fame and
| fortune of that man that had that marvellous
collection of weather on. exhibition at the
He was going to travel all over the world
and get specimens from all climes. said:
Don't you do it you come to New Eng
land on favorable spring day / told
him what we could do in the way of style,
variety and quantity. [Laughter.] Well,
he came and he made his collection in four
days. ~ 5.
sold Probabilities has mighty reputa-
tion for accurate prophecy, and Thoroughly
well deserves it. You take up the papers
and observe how crisply and confidently he
checks off what to-day's weather is going
to be on the Pacific, down South, in the
Middle States and in the Wisconsin region.
He doesn't know what the weather is going
| to be in New England. He mulls over it,
and by and by he gets out something about
like this: Probable nor'east to sou'west
winds, varying to the southard and westard
and BASTARD and points between high and
low barometer, sweeping around from
place to place; probable areas of rain,
snow, hail and drought, succeeded or pre-.
ceded by earthquakes, with thunder and
lightning, Laughter and applause. ] Then
he jots down this postscript from his
wandering mind to cover accidents But
it is possible that the programme may be
wholly changed in the meantime Laugh
ter. a.
81 could speak volumes about the inhu-
man pcryersity of the New England wealth
Ell, but will give but a single specimen.
like to hear rain ON tin roof, SO cover
ed part of my roof with tin, with an eye to
that luxury. Well, sir, do you think it
ever rains on the tin? No, sir; skips it
every time. Laughter
"Tf we had not our bewitching autumn
foliage we should still have to credit the
weather with one feature which compen-
safes for all its bullying vagaries-the ice
storm-when leahess tree is clothed with
ice from the bottom to the top--ice that is
as bright and clear as crystal /; every bough
and twig is strung with ice beads, frozen
dew-drops, and the whole tree sparkles,
CuIu anu ess---a=4se rn--.-.-,~
diamond plume. [Applause.] Then the
wind waves the branches, and the sun
comes out and turns all of those myriads of
beads and drops to prisms, that glow and
hum and flash with all manner of colored
fires. which change and change again, with
inconceivable rapidity, from blue to red,
from red to green. and green to gold the
tree becomes sparkling fountain, very
explosion OF dazzling jewels and it stands
there the acme, the climax, the supremest
possibility in art or measure OF bewiidering,
Intoxicating, intolerable magnifcence! One
cannot make the words too strong. Long
continued applause.
"Month after month lay up hate and
grudge against the New England weather;
but when the ice-storm comes atlast, say.
sThere I forgive you now the books are
square between us you don't owe me
cent go and sin no more your little faults
and foibes count for nothing ; you are the
most enchanting weather in the world !''
lApplause and laughter.l