The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1877-05-17

"Thank you; it is pretty sad. But
don't worry much. Bungay was poor
sort of man to get along with, and now
that he's gone I'm going to stand it with.
out CRYING my eyes out. Well have to
bury him, / s'p0se, thought"
'That is the usual thing to do in such
cases."
"Well, I want you to tend to it forme.
/ reckon the Coroner ill have to sit on
him first. But when they get through, il
you'll Just collect the pieces and shake
him into some kind of a bag and pack him
into coffin, I'll be obliged"
Certainly, Mrs. Bungay. When do you
want the funeral to Occur?'
"Oh, most any day. P'rhaps the
sooner the better, SOS We can have ltOver.
It'll save expense, too, by taking less ice.
I don't want to spend much money on 1t,
Mr.. Toombs. Rig him up some kind of q
cheap coffin, and mark his name on it
with a brush, aud bury him with as little
fuss as possible. I'll come along with q
couple of friends; and we'll walk. No
carriages. Times are too hard"
II will attend 70 it."
And, Mr.. Toombs, there is another
matter. Mr.. Bungay's life was insured for
about twenty thousand dollars, and want
to get it az soon as possible, and when l
get it I shall think of marrying again."
Indeed, MADAME
"Yes; and can you think of anybody
II dunno. Knight. Twenty thousand
you say he left?''
Twenty thousand; yes. Now, Mr..
Toombs, you'll think me bold, but only
tell the honest truth when I say that I
prefer widOwer, and man who IL about
middle-age, and in some business connect.
ed with cemeteries"
How would an undertaken suit you -
II think very we'll, if / could find one.
often told Bungay that wished he
was an undertaken"
"Well, Mrs. Bungay, it's little kinder
sudden: l haven't thought much about it s;
and old Bungay's hardly got fairly settled
in the world of the hereafter; but bust
ness is business, and if you must have an
undertaken to love you and look after that
life insurance money, it appears to me
that am just about that kind of q man.
Will you take me?''
"Oh, James! fold me to your bosom!'
James was just about to fold her, when
Bungay, white with rage, burst from the
closet, and exclaimed:
"Unhand her, villainl Touch tina
woman and you die! Leave this house u
once, or Ill brain you with the poker
And as for you, Mrs. Bungay, you cal
pack up your buds and quit. I've done
with you; 1 know now that you ar,
q cOld-hearted, faithless, abOminablt
wretch! Go, and 60 at once! I did thi!
to try you, and my eyes are opened"
II know you did, and I concluded t.
pay you in your own COIN"
"That's too awful thin. 1t won't holt
water"
"It's true anyhow. You told Mr.. Ma
gill you were going to do it, and he tolt
me-"
"He did, hey: I'll bust the head of
of him.
"When you are really dead will be
good deal more sorry, provided you dom
make such fool of ourself while you're
alive"
"You wills You will really be sorry p
"Of course!''
"And you won't marry Toombs
Where is that man Toombs? By George
I'll go for him now! He was mighty
hungry for that life insurance money
I'll step around and kick him at Onc'
while I'm mad. Well. talk this matte
over when come back"
Then Bungay left to call upon Toombs
and when he returned he dropped the sub
ject He has drawn up his will so tina
his wife is cut off with q shilling If sh
employs Toombs as the undertaker.-Ma
Adeler, in N. =. Weekly.