The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1877-10-06
SOME RAMBLING NOTES.
BY MARK TWAIN.

All the journeyings I had ever done
had been purely in the way of business.
The pleasant May weather suggested a
novelty, namely: trip for pure recrea-
ton, the bread and butter element left
out. The Reverend said he would 90,
too; good man, one of the best of men,
although Clergyman. At eleven at
night we were in New Haven and on
board the New York boat. We bought
our tickets, and then went wandering
around, here and there, in the solid COM
fort of being free and idle, and of put
ting distance between ourselves and the
mails and telegraphs.
After a while | went to my stateroom
and undressed, but the night was too
enticing for bed. We were moving
down the bay now, and it was pleasant
to stand at the window and take the cool
night breeze and watch the gliding lights
on shore. Presently two elderly men
sat down under that window and began
conversation. Their talk was properly
no business of mine, yet l was feeling
friendly toward the world and willing to
be entertained. | soon gathered that
they were brothers, that they were from
a small Connecticut village, and that the
matter in hand concerned the cemetery.
Said one:
Now, John, we talked it all over
amongst ourselves, and this is what we've
done. You see, everybody was a-movin'
from the old buryin' ground, and our
folks was most about left to themselves,
as you may say. They was crowded,
too, as you know; lot want big enough
in the first place; and last year, when
Seth's wife died, we couldn't hardly tuck
her in. She sort O. overlaid Deacon
Shorb's lot, and he soured on her, so to
speak, and on the rest of US, too. So we
talked it over, and l was for layout In
the new simitery on the hill. They
want unwilling, if it was cheap. Well,
the two best and biggest plots was
No. s and No. 9-both of size; nice,
comfortable rooms for twenty-six-
twenty.six full-growns, that is; but you
reckon in children and other shorts, and
strike an everage, and | should say you
might lay in thirty, or maybe thirty-two
or three, pretty genteel-no crowdin' to
signify"
"That's a plenty, William Which
one did you buy?"
Well, I'm a-coming to that, John.
You see, No. 8 was thirteen dollars, No.
8 fourteen"
81 see. Sos It you took No. s."
"You wait. l took No. 8. And I'll
tell you for why. In the first place
Deacon Shorb wanted it. Well, after
the way he'd gone on about Seth's wife
overlappin' his premises, I'd "a beat him
G Al n - i
two dollars extra, let alone one. That's
the way felt about it. Says l, what's
dollar, anyway? Life's ony pilgrim
age, says l; we amt here for good, and
we can't take it with US, says l. So l
Just dumped it down, KNOWN the Lord
don't suffer good deed to go for nothin',
and cal'latin' to take it out O. somebody
in the course O. trade. Then there was
another reason, John. No. 9s long
way the handest lot in the simitery, and
the likeliest for situation. 1t lays right
on top of knoll in the dead center of
the buryin' ground; and you can see
Millport from there, and Tracy's, and
Hopper Mount, and raft O farms, and
so on. There amt no better outlook
from buryin' plot in the State. 81 Hig-
gins says so, and | reckon he ought to
know. Well, and that amt all. Course
Shorb had to take No. s; want no help
for It. Now, No. 8 jines on to No 8,
but it's on the slope of the hill, and every
time it rains it II soak right down on the
Shorbs. 81 Higgins says t when the
deacon's time comes he'd better take oNt
fire and marine insurance both on his re-
mains"
Here there was the sound of low,
placid, duplicate chuckle of appreciation
and satisfaction.
NOW John, here's little rough draft
of the ground, that I've made on piece
of paper. Up here in the left-hand cor
ner we've punched the Departed; took
them from the old graveyard and slowed
them one along side O. t'other, on first
come. frst-served plan, no partialities,
with Gran'ther Jones for starter, on'y
because it happened so, and windin' up
indiscriminate with Seth's twins Well,
next comes the Twin. Here, where it's
marked A, we're goin to put Marian and
her family, when they're called; B, that's
for Brother Hosea and his'n; G, Calvin
and tribe. What's left is these two lots
here-just the gem of the whole patch
for general style and outlook; they're fol-
me and my folks, and you and yourn
Which of them would you ruther be
buried in?"