Litchfield enquirer., 1877-02-22
CLIPPIMCSa

Can it be that Mad-ox IS trying to bulldoze Wells?
 Flight to seven" isn't large majority; but it vill do.
 Blue glass treatments homeopathic panes to cure pains.
 I.n't .sfyinety- -ana Nine',s short metre for Old ."Hnndged." -%E . Et@s
 Men who fish for compliments don't care how dirty the water is.
 The gates of Heaven are too narrow fof drunkards to. stagger through.
 Lies about premature robins and blue- birds are now to be looked for.
 Give oftener than you trust and you will retain more friends and wealth.
 What popular cry fully describes aa incipient mustacbe?-Down, in front. :"
 Appearances are deceitful The coun- terfeit nickles have the motto, ''In God we trust.
 A wise Persian maxim says: ::'Act not against thy reason; 1t IS sure guide; set not thy heart on illusions"
 One of the most fatal temptations to the weak is slight deviation from the truth for the sake ofapparent good. Judge Black thinks it is not best "while your head is in the lion's mouth, to abuse the man who is twisting his tail'' Lewis of the Dreroit Free Press, did not become witty until he was blown up | in a steamboat explosion. He went up sad and came down funny.
 A boy beginning. to- learn geography said the Poles live partly at one end oi thegfobe and partly at the other, because 1t is marked on the map.
 ''Insults," says a modern philosopher, are like counterfeit money" We cannot hinder their being offered, but we are not compelled to take them. # A man who had hls brains knocked out and still lives. is supposed to have de- signed all the comic valentines displayed | this year, besides composing the '.poet, ry" Accompaniment. It is thought those persons who send them have no bralns to knock out. *.-t-s ~ An entire quart of whiskey was con. sumed by a Louisiana darkey before he fully recovered from bite of tarantula It was then discovered that he had been stung by::a wasp. The men who contrib uted the whiskey were too mad to speak above whisper.
 "What becomes of all the ulster's ?" asks city daily,v. A year or. more aimee we published the statement of an old Ia. dY that her nephew had had ''three ulster removed from his stomach" This was probably the entire coating of his stom- ach, with the lining torn out.
 This has been the dryest winter since Columbus discovered America. A man in West Rome piled two cords of wood in a vacant lot last fall, and left it there un- til last Wednesday. It has dried and shrunk away so that all there was left of it when he went after 1t, was pile of five sticks of wood with g clay pipe on top of it.
 A young lady of Bellevue. Ohio, bet 8 young man kiss that Tilden would be pay if Hayes was elected. On the morn. ing of the 9th hesOalled and paid the bet: on the 9th he called and took it back. TAat evening she pad the. bet. Next morning she took it back, and ds he paid. and so they have been kept busy by the contradictory dispatches ever since. and both declare their willingness and ability to hold out until Congress decides the question. They don't like the new com- promise bill.
 A lady of religious turn of mind. re- siding in the country, was anxious to pre- sent her nephew, who was going to sea, with some slight testimony of her aftec- tion, and decided, if she could obtain it, to give him pious work, known as s'The Companion to the Altar" But the near est town was nine miles of, so she walked over to the neighboriug village and iu. quired for ihe work at the general shop, which combined groeeries. haber:dashery, and the post-ofice, with little book selling. The proprietor replied that he thought he possessed the book, but after running his finger along his shelf he turn ed round and said. 1T am sorry to say that have not got it, madam; but here is work of the aame class, the, Guide to Courtship and Marriage. if that will snit you."