davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Alta court OF Probate holden at Ellsworth within
and for the County OF Hancock. on the 81 Wed !
nesday OF June A. D. lsI1.
rBES NJ. HAMOR, named Executor in certain
q instrument pur porting 10 be the last wall and
testament OF Lorenzo Mayo, late OF Eden, IN said
Ceunty, deceased, having presented the same Tor
probate
DRDERED-That the saId EDen NJ. uamOr give
notice thereof To all persons Interested by rau7-
ing copy of this order to be published thee
weeks successively in the Ellsworth American,
printed In Ellsworth. that they may appear al
Probate Court to be holden At Ellsworth. on the
lst Wednesday OF Aug next, at ten VI the CLOCK
in the forenoon ami shew cause, If any they have
why the .ad instrument should not be proved.
approved. and allowed as the last wul and te;tI-
ment oi said deceased
3wa6 PARKER TUCK, Judge.
true copy-Attest: CHAs. Z. DoRR Register.
THE SUBSCRIBER hereby give. public notice To
i all concerned, that he has been duly appoint
ed and has taken upon himself the trust of an
Executor of the last Will and testament of
ROsIL "a BARTLETT, late OF Mt. Desert.
in the Co. Of Hancock, deceased. by giving
bond as the law directs: he therefore requests all
persons who are indebted 10 the said dec easeds
estate, to make immediate payment. and those
who have any demands thereon, 10 exhibit the
same Tor payment.
II. {. RAYMOND, Executor.
Mt. Desert. June 2Oth. ls17. 3w26
THE SUBSCRIBER hereby gives public notice
i 10 all concerned that he has been duly
appointed. and has taken upoL himself the trust
OF an Admin strator with the will annexed, of the
Estate OF
JOHN d. GRINDLE. late of forand,
in the County OF Hancock, deceased. By CIV
ing bond as the law Directs he therefore requests
ali persons who are indebted TO the said deceas
eds estate to make immediate payment an d
those who have any immediate demands thereon
to exhibit the same tor payment.
JAMES GRAY, Admnistrator-
Orland June goth, 1917. 3w2
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Do you want to be cured of Dyspepsia, con-
stipaiion. Piles and all diseases of the stom-
ach. Bowels and Liver? II you do. go to G, A..
Psrcher's and get bottle OF Virgins Pellets
They will cure you. For sale by all druggists
for so cents bottle, or sent by mail on receipt
OF price. Prepared by wiggin 4 Co. Rocklsnd,
Me.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

When you visit or leave the City of NEW YORK.
save annoyance and expense of carriage hire and
stop 81 the q RAND UNION HOTEL, op-
pOsite the GRAND CENTRAL DEPOT. IL has
over $50 elegantly furnished rooms, and IS fitted
up at an expense OF over sgJ 600. Elevator, steam
and af modei n improvements. European Plan .-
The REsTAl ~ ANTS. Lunch Counter and
Wine Rooms are supplied with the best the mar
kct can furnish. The cuisine Is unsurpassed.
Rooms for single Persol, sl. sl.61, and " psr
day; rich suites families proporiionatelY low.
that visitors to the city and travellers can live
mors luNuriously. for less money. at the GRAND
UNION, than st any other first class Hotel IN the
city. siAges and cars pass the Hotel every min
ute for all parts OF the CITY.
lyil g. r. & W. ID. GARRISON, Managers.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

PYLEs DrETETIC S,LERATUs.-Uniyersa
acknow lodged the best in use. Each pound
bears the name OF JAMES PYLE. None genu-
Inc with out. lyr2t
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
New Adverti-ement.t this Week.

Notice-V + Hooper.
Freedom NOtice-Jesse Atwood.
Administrators Notice.. NJ. Hamor.
Notice OF IFOreciosure-Julia Z. Barnard.
Lumber Commission Merchants-Geo. p. CLARK
4 Co
Of Otis
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

TO TuE non. Juagc OF Probate for the County
OF Hancock.
THE Petition and Representation Of Hiram FIVE,
the County OF Hancock Minor re,pectfHIly shews,
that the said Mlnori seized an possessed Of cr-
tain real estate situated in -attf rern01I, ard de
scTibeti iolJw.s-The h0mestetd sd lot ot the late
Albert T. O0er. al seal Cove, containing about
thirty acres, aso undivided half OF wood lot
IN MI Desert, near seal Cove, knosn AS the OBer
wool lot. That -lid estate - uuprOducttve of Iny
benefit 10 said Minor, ani tina; Il Will be for the
interest oi -aii Minor thar the same should be
-uil and the proceeds put out ami secured on tn
tSrc-t Therefore prayz your honor that he mag
b Authorized and empowered agreeably 10 law
to sell at public sale the above described real es
tate or such part ut Il in your opinion may e
eNpe-lIcnt. All which j. respectfully submitted.
HIRAM fLIE, Guardian.
june 10th, l>37.
STATE OF MAINE.
HANCOCK. -. Court OF Probate, Ellsworth,
June Term \. - 1871.
Upon lIe foregoing petition. ORDERED, That
saii petitioner give public notice 10 all persons
interested by causing copy tI the petition, and
this orIcr thereon, To be- published three weeks
succe-s:yely IN the Ellsworth American, a news
paper published IN Ellsworth, in said county I,
that they may appear at Court of Probate 10
be held at Ellsworth, in said County, on the lst
Wednesday Of August next, at ten OF the cloik in
the forenoon, to show cause, If any they have.
why the prayer Of said petitioner should not not
granted
Iw-2G PARKER TUCK, Judge.
Attezt.-CHAs. T. DoRK Register.
4 true copy-Auest; CHAs. +. DoRR, Register.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Contractors for the principal mail
routes in the County for four years COM
mencing Jnly lst. 1877.
Ellsworth TO Bangor daily, J. NJ. Hale.
Jr.
Ellsworth to Bucksport, TrI weekly, J.
NJ. Hale, Jr.
Ellsworth to Cherryfield, daily. BragLon
s Bunker.
Ellsworth to Cherryheld, [Shore Line
Daily. Cleayes & Cook
Ellsworth to Bluehill twice week.
Willard Treworgy.
EEllsworih to SO. West Harbor. daily.
John Harden.
Ellsworth to Lamoipe. tri weekly. Ey-
erett Mcfarland.
Ellsworth to Great Pond, tri weekly,
Cbas. Carr.
BucksPort to Castine. daily, Hill & Goog
ings.
Bucksport to Penobscot; Penobscot to
Sedgwick. daily.
Mt Desert Bridge to Bar Harbor. daily.
RoJ,ck Bros.
Some>ville to Bass Harbor. daily. NJ. W.
Hodgdon
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
Nj A II II E ID .

Watham-June 23d, by Calvin kingman
Esq, Wilson J. Haslam and Miss Matte X
Moore, all of Waltham.
Castine-June 29th. by the Rev. A. Z. Ives
Mr.. Wellington f. Blake and Miss Mary A.
Bates, both OF Brooksville.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
Houses Struck by Lightning.
PoRTLAND, July 2.

PORTLAND, July 2.
The house Of SIlas l.. Adams of Gray,
was badly shattered by lightning Sunday
night Damage $50. Mrs. Dewey of
Boston. had her face cut by broken glass.
II Cape Elizabeth the insulators were
torn of the barn OF Philip R. Brown.
BIuDEFoED. Me. July ,.
During yesterdays thurder storm the
house OF John Bowher in kennebuukport
was struck aud badly shattered.
Mrs. Bowden who was standing in front
OF The mirror was struck, knocked down
and her face and tongue severely burned.
The barn Of Dan Taylor OF kenuebunk,
was badly shattered; also trees and tele-
graph poles in this city and at Old Orch
ard were broken and other minor damages
reported.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Hncksport.
Bucksport has contributed to st. John,
s cases and barrels of needfuls, and some
thing more than $500 in cash.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
To THE Hon. Judge Of Probate OF .he County

To THE HON. Judge OF Probate OF .he County
OF Hancock.
DANSOM b. ABBOTT. of Hancock, OF the Coun
n ~ Of Hancock heir OF Shemuel Abbott late
OF Hancnck In said County. deceased, respect
fully represents that said deceased died on the
fourth day OF March, \. ID. ISIS, intestste seized
and possessed Of estate in said County, which
ought to be admin stored according 10 law; that
there are various demands against said estate due
20 certain psr-ons, which should be paid Where
fore your petitioner prays that the administration
Of said estate may be granted TO him, Ransom B.
Abbott or 10 some other suitable person.
RANSOM II. ABBOTT.
June sJth, l~77.
STATE OF MAINE.
HASCoCK. ss.-Court Of Probate, June Term
\. u. isI7.
Upon the foregoing petition, Ordered,-Thai
the ali petitioner give public notice TO all per
sons Interested. by causing copy OF the petition
and this order thereon. to be published three
weeks suecessiyely in the Ellsworth American. n
new spaper publ shed in Ellsworth. that hey may
appear at Probate Court fer said County. to be
held al Ellsworth, on the ist wednesday OF Aug
next, at ten OF the clock the forenoon, TO show
cause R-Any they have, why the prayer of said
petit inuer should not be granted.
5w1B PARKER TICK, Judge.
Attcst:-CHAs. l.. DoRE, Register.
4 True copy AIest.-CHAs. L. DoRR, Regr.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
Trenton

IL. $. Trevett. left at this office on
Saturday, a box of splendid cultivated
Strawberries. grown by his grandson.
They were large, sweet. pleasant to the
eve and taste.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

During the prevalence OF the heavy
thuudsr shower last evening. many old
choice trees in the suburbs were shattered.
telegraph poles prostrated aud several per
sons Knocked down. The storm in New
iugtou and York was very severe. One
mau was struck and made totally desf in
the latter place. And the strong wind ac-
companying blew over several buildings
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
To COnsun,Dfires

Inslanter cures Tooothache in one moment.
3ltf
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

THE GLORIOUS FoURTH.-Will be OBJ
served at Sullivan and Franklin with
orations, Music. Dinners and Balls. ~
Surry, an oration by II. l.. Tripp ESQ.
At 5. W. Harbor there is to be Fair and
Dance, at Trenton. dinner in the grove
on Thompson island. At Amherst Fairs
and Suppers. At No. Ellsworth. a supper
and Dance in the evening at Agricultural
Hall. The Ellsworth Falls people are to
60 on picnic to Weymouth Point. The
Boys OF Eugine, Union No.2 run with their
machine by water and rail to Waterville.
when they will show the kennebeckers
some tall playing. Aud last but not
least. the staunch little steamer Ulysses
commanded by Capt. Robinson. than
whom there's no more popular al oblig In :
gentleman. will make an excursion to
oekland. As there Is to be grand cee-
brstiOn at Thomaston. with numerous
other attractions. II seems 10 us that the
trip along our grand coast, and among
the island with pleasant company. fine
music aud delightful. weather. .soflers su-
perior inducements for the day 1t is 10
be hoped that all, old and young, at home
or abroad, will enjoy this national holiday,
mindful of the blessings vouchsafed and
in a rational way spend its hours. bedt-
ting tie free and intelligent citizens of the
grandest Republic on earth.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
CATARRh.
'.The Best and Only Medicine that will Cure
Catarrh What a Man who has had Catarrh
twenty-five Years Says.

KSowERsvILLE. y. Y, July 81, 1875.
Messrs LIrTLEFrELD Co.:
will tell YOU what | think of your medicine
and what ii has done for me. | believe it is the
best and only medicine that will catarrh |
have had the Catarrh for twenty-five years; have
asked phy sIcians What shall / do, have the
Catarrh so badly ?" and | have always got this
reply: There is no care for Catarrh; simply let
1t alone and be careful and not take cold.n This
is all the satisfaction I could get. Then came
across one OF your little pamphlets, and | went
and bought a bottle, and greater satisfaction
never derived from any medicine. l have taken
four bottles. had the Catarrh Just badly as
any one could, and ! consider myself almost
cured | consider your medicine has merits that
no other Catarrh medicine can claim will and
do heartily recommend 1t to all afflicted with Ca
tarrh AS the only cure known.
Very truly yours,
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
List of taxpayers in this city paving
above 500 the present year.

NJ. Avery S,s- ,n
Isaiah BlaI-lell u. -;
John Black -, o.
Geo. y. Black 800 p
AIox y RI,cL Oh. 70
Estate John Black 123 "a
VIM II Rack rOs 4,
& W RsgIey Ir5
+. Rurnhsm ls.lI
CLARK & Dzyis a2s o.
Geo. Cunningham 4 Co 1s0,5
J. II. Chamberlain 1G9 -
J W. Co,nbs "a o.
j. I. Crippen li6 -
'As' pa'Is 4oS "a
jas Davis l"O -
u a bu'''H ~ -
- ~
n rnnes aI- o.
/. A. Emery ,ea..
II Forssi,h 100 ao
Levi, Friend opa1,
CIV. Fiske 1Gs N
A. +. Greeley 1la
Z. II. Greeley 1865
j. l. a &. II. Grant l34 81
l. " uiAht I'll %
90 -
:, :, -
-. r. "
Eugene haze iJ2 o.
John NJ. Hale l54 50
II. II. uarden 1l5 10
Seth Hall l20 90
II. NJ & B. Hall l4s4 ~
e uol, Iz,es
40, o'
A. NJ hopkins ~ 20
J. d. Hopkins 20i s5
J. d. Hopkins 4 Co. .as OK
I Higgin. ,IsX
lar HoImas 10 an
- ri. a,oa,
- ~ "a
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
SPECIAL NOTICE.

SPECIAL NOTICE.
All persons will take notice that they are for
hidden from trespassng in any manner on Jor-
dams Island, in the town OF GouldsbOro, French.
mans Bay, or of taking therefrom be rries Of any
kind or hunting upon same with without dogs,
IS all offences Of this kind will be prosecuted to
the extent Of the law.
II. W. JORDAN,
5. JORDAN, $Owners.
s. PORTER.
6ouldsboro. May Is, 1877. 5mo20s
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

TO THE HON. Judge of Probate tor the County
oil Hancock
THE undersigned, widow OF Abram Treworgy.
late of Surry, in said County. deceased, re
spectuy represents, that said deceased died
possessed oil personal 2Estate, an inventory of
which has been duly returned into the Probete
once that her circum stances render IL necessary
that she should have more OF sald personal estate
than she is entitled to on distribution thereof.
She therefore prays that your honor would grant
her such allowance out OF said personal estate. as
in your discretion you may determine necessary
and proper, and for the appointment of commits. :.
sioners TO set her dover in the real estate OF
said deceased -
sALOME TREWORGY. by
SAMUEL WATSON, Admir-.
June goth. 1877.
STATE OF MAINE.
HANCOCK, SIS Court ot Probate, Ellsworth,
June Term, A. D.. 1871
Upon the foregoing Petition. ORDERED, That
said Widow give public notice to all persons
interested, by causing copy of the petition. and
this order thereon, TO be published three weeks
succes ssively in the Ellsworth American, news
paper published IN Ellsworth in said County,
that they may appear at Court OF Probate LOT
said County to be held at Ellsworth, on the lst
Wednesday of August next, at ter of the clock In
the forenoon, 10 show cause, II any they nave
why the same should not be granted.
3w2S PARKER TUCK, Judge.
Attest:-CHAs. p. DORR, Register.
true copy-Attest:-CHAs. p. DoRR Reg'r.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

TO THE HON. Judge of Probate for the County
of Hancock.
THE undersigned administrator OF the estate OF
i Philander II. Harding, late OF Ellsworth In
said County, deceased, respectfully represents
that the goods and chattels rights and credits OF
said deceas ed are not sufficient TO pay ms just
debts and charges of administration. by the sum
of ave hundred dollars. Wherefore your petit
toner prsys yonr Honor to grant him License
to SELL at public or private sale. and convey sur
fcIent to produce the sum OF i've hundred (oo9)
dollars of the real estate of the deceased includ
ing the reversion of the widows dover therein,)
to satisfy said debts and charges OF administra-
ton,
CALVIN G. PECK. Admir-.
Ellsworth. June 20th 1871
STATE OF MAINE.
HANCOCK, S. Court of Probate, June Term,
A. ID. 1917
Upon the foregoing Petition, ORDERED That
said petitioner give public notice to all persons
interested, by causing q copy OF the petition and
this order thereon, to be published three weeks
successfully in the Ellsworth American, news
paper published in Ellsworth, in said County, that
they may appear at q Court of Probate for said
County. to be held at Ellsworth, IN said County,
on the lst day of August next. at ten Of the
clock in the forenoon, and shew cause If any they
have, why the prayer of said petitioner should
not be granted.
Attest. CHAs. p. DORR, Register. 3wS6
A true copy-Attest: CHAs. p. DORR, Register.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Instanter cures Toothache in one moment.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05


Dear Srs: 1t gives me great plea sure to tell
people the good results have obtained from the
use OF your Constitutional Catarrh Remedy. My
Catarrh was very offensive. Discharges from The
head and throat, sometimes causing sickness OF
the stomach. and pain in the head the most of the
time, and a very sore throat, with a hacking
cough and hoarseness; sometimes it affected my
eyes very badly. have used all kinds of snuffs
and local applications without any benefit. For
some time have been using medicine from an
eminent ply sicisn in New York with no benedt.
Your Remedy seemed to strike at the root OF the
pains in a short time. and feel as thought never
should be troubled again. l recommended 1t to
a number OF nv friends who have been benefited
by it.
remain your friend,
ADDIE MILLER.
Price d per bottle. A pamphlet OF 80 pages,
giving a treatise Catarrh, with innumerab lie
cases of cures, sent FREE, by addressing the pro-
prieters.
LITTLEFIELD CO., Manchester, N. IL.
2mos25
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Six boxes of clothes have been sent
by the ladies OF this city, to the sufferers
by the st. John fire.
As our usual publication day occurs
on the 4th. we issue the present number of
the AMERICAN one day earlier, in order to
give the compositors their holiday.
A communication from Deer Isle has
been received and would have appeared
had it been accompanied with the writer's
name.
DO not neglect to read the article on
the FIRST page on "Hnlling Strawberries, =
wherein the writer gives good practical
advice aId also an excellent moral, aptly
drawn from her subject.
The annual excursion of the Unitarian
sunday School, will be held Friday, July
9th. The vessel will leave the wharf at
: 80 A. NJ. and proceed down the Bay. TO
Newbury Neck, returning to Weymouth
Point. where the picnic will be helc.-
- holars will get tickets free. on applica-
tion 10 Their teachers. All others can buy
them at the wharf for p cents each.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

CALL AT THIS OFFICE
AND GET YOUR BUSINESS CARDS
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Of medicine i last growing IN popular favor. II
y founded on the principle that there Is in all
schools of thought something OF value. and that
truth should he rccos nLed and it, leachiugs adop
ted and u-esi wherever they may be found or from
whatever quarter they may come. To q physician
OF this broad and liberal school ul medical theory
ami practice Dciong- the homer ot having discoy-
cred an entirely new and succcsstul method OF
cotuu-tIi < lar as -l-. FarAlA -i- be termed,
oS reason 90 its stAntly Increasing prev lencc
The disease oi The age II Ia. hitherto been clsss
IL M
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05
ELLSWORTH PRICE CURRENT,
Corrected Weekly

StrawbcrTics-pcr lr. 10 tonce-pcr lh. .2-a 81
tioo-ebcrric--pcr ~ 10 SuSAr-Per H.
Applcs-icr ID GranulItet, la II
Dried .-alO Juncc-A. la Il =
tsretn-Is-r Ebl. MpiAss.-- per gal
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

Paralysis may proceed from the brain which i
the scAt OF sensation and yolitiru. or from the
spinal marTos and nerves. by Nhigh sen .Alion
all over tie body, or it may take eccentric forms
OF dcTt lUpmcnt, and effect special ocAlltic. the
human organization. depriying the sufferer Il may
tc al light or h"auHE or smt ling. The more
frequent forms Uf the ul-rA-e arr those 81 para
lyEcd motion, and may D. IhIs clAssiIed Apo
ptcNy OF the brain. con ton. soitruiug the
spinal marrO~ and partial paralysis, when from
the pressure artsiug from = morbid grow IN or tu.
NOR, Vr from mechanical lIIury. or ofteu from
some unknown cause. the paris supplied by a
particular part are pArAly yEcd.
Ellsworth American., 1877-07-05

will demonstrate to any who may desire to secure
for themselves their friends the advantages of
such a resort. They will find a handsome man
sion in a pleasant secluded and fashionable part
of the city. organized in the most efficient tanner
and condue Ted SO as to secure all the benefits o "a
hospital, and al the time retain all the chaE
acteFistics Of home. So large a number oil ap-
plicants have sought admission to this excellent
Institution during the past year that DIR Rhodes is
engaged In endeavoriDg To secure a larger
establishment for their accommodation. Having
personally examined the institution and observed
the details OF its internal economy, we would
recommend 1t as one of the be resorts open to
sufferers from any of the maladies above emu
meIated ly5I
The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1877-08-30
The Atrocities of War;

The Turkish Minister of Foreign Affairs
informs his diplomatic agents that the Rus
SLAMS, on entering Esk Saghra, disarmed the
Mussulmans, employed the Mokdars to catch
the Mussulmans out of their houses, and
they were massacred. Eleven hundred were
thus put to death. When the Russians
entered Lovatz, fifteen women and children,
fleeing from the invaders, were killed.
Others, to escape outrage or death, had to
abandon everything, even their children.
Every Mussulman house in Lovatz was
piliaged. After the recapture of the town,
the Russians carried the devastation and
carnage into the neighboring districts. The
Russians drove out all the Mussulman in
habitants of the village of Herste, and
burned all the men and some of the women.
Only one woman escaped. Seventy Mussul-
mans and the Imaum of Yukhem were shut
up in barn, which was fired. Forty
four other Mussulmans was massacred, and
the Mussulman women outraged. Eight
young girls who resisted were killed, and
two were burned with the men. The greater
part of the other women and children were
taken outside the village, and with their
children at their side, were slaughtered.
Twenty women and children who escaped
the massacre were rescued by the Ottoman
troops. An English military attache him.
self witnessed all these horrors. The Rus
slams disarmed the Mussulmans of Eski
Saghra, Kasanlik, and the neighboring
villages, and distributed arms among the
Bulgarians, who drove down four hundred
Mussulmans to the River Tundja
and massacred them. At Eski
Saghra and its neighborhood the
Bulgarians continue to massacre the
Mussulman population. The atrocities COM
mitted by the Cossacks and Bulgarians con-
tinue. The women and children who had
sought refuge in Khidir Keni were massa-
cred. Other families were shut up in a
granary, but were delivered by our troops.
Among them were several women and
children who had been wounded. The Bull
garians put to the fire and sword, the Mus
sulman village of Sofedji and several others,
after having carried off the women and
girls, whom they outraged, killed, and mutt
lated horribly. One woman and her two
sons were the only persons saved.
The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1877-08-30
A Civil Service Examination.

In these days, when civil service re-
form is agitating the bosom Of the poll
tician, it may not be out of place to
present, for the consideration of aspi-
rants for place at Washington, the fol-
lowing dialogue that occurred some
years ago between Judge c. and
candidate for Door-keeper of the House:
Enter candidate, who supposes the
Judge to be member.
Candidate-If you please, Sir, [ wish
to be elected Door-keeper of the House,
and if you will be so good as to vote for
me will try to-
Judge-Take seat, Sir, and will ex-
anime you.
Candidate-Yes, Sir, if you please.
Judge (gravely)-Have you ever been
a Door-keeper?
Candidate-No, Sir; but I trust by
your vote and
Judge-Have you ever been instructed
in the responsible and arduous duties of
bookkeeping?
Candidate-No, Sir; but I would like
to be.
Judge-Have you ever attended lee
lures on bookkeeping?
Candidate-Why, no; never heard
of any.
Judge (sternly)-Have you ever read
book on the science of bookkeeping
Candidate never did, Sir; but ]
would, if
Judge-Have you ever conversed with
one who has read such book?
Candidate-No, Sir; but I certainly
will.
Judge (solemnly)-Do you not see
Sir, that you have not a single qualifca
tion for the office.
Exit candidate, resolved to go hom,
and give it up