The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1877-09-29
MARK TWAlN,S CHEEK.
Why He and Dan De guile Severed
Their FriendshIp
From the California Tootlight. !

from the California TOotlightI
Those two sagebrush wits once roomed
together during the early days Of Vir-
ginia City, when every thing was in its
primitive state, and before the advancing
hand of civilization provided the com
forts OF metropolitan life. Both were
employed on the Enterprise Dan as the
rock sharp" and Mark az the funny
man" One of Marks eccentricities
was to shirk all kind of responsibility,
and he invariably left Dan 10 do all the
buying, rent-paying, &C., and by dint Of
much perseverance and An equal amount
OF forclbls persuasion, Dan managed to
make Mark pay his quota toward the ex-
pences-not that the latter regretted
separating himself from few shekels,
of course not but from an indispostion
TO be bothered with such trihes as his
mind scared to higher things than a
dollars worth of coal, -four bits
worth Of kerosene" or "a quarters worth
OF washing soap. &c. Mark carried his
Indifference to extremes; but there was
really no limit to bis cheek. He pos
sessed the pure, genuine, unadulterated
articl-. He would borrow Dams comb,
use IL, put it IN his pocket and blow Dan
up Tor not possessing better one. In
those days he was never known to own
pair OF drawers or an undershirt or
even pair Of socks; but he would walk
the streets in a suit of Dan $ best, which
be had appropriated from the latter's
trunk, and then swear because there
happened to be a button off the shirt.
He would go to Dams trunk, examine
the articles therein, aid then turn to
that person and ask him if he didn' t
have pair of socks without a hole in
the heel.
Mark aud Dan were both inveterate
smokers, and OF course we know who
bought the tobacco. If Dan should
happen to get hold OF an inferior brand
and fill the box with it, Mark would in
timate that when people bought tobac-
co they might exercise little judgment,
and not get stuff that man couldn't t
use.' These little peculiarties of Mark S
nature. though somewhat expensive to
Dan, were nevertheless enjoyed by him !;
but one day Mark overleaped the bounds
OF Dan S amiability, and that individual
got mad. Think Of it--Dan De Guile
in a passion!
1t seems Mark ran out of tooth.
brush, and how to replace it without
sacrificing some Of his mining stock
puzzled him considerably. But bril-
liant idea one day thrust itself into his
troubled scone.
Heaven be praised for the thought"
soliloquized he; 'genius will be reward
ed!' SO one morning, standing by the
washstand, Just after rising, he picked
up the coveted article, and, turning it
round and round in his hand, said to
Dan, who was still snugly ensconced
between his blankets, but one eye on
Mark:
'Say, Dan, that looks like my brush. "
Liar" shouted Dan; THAT brush
did an Egyptian to my mother give!"
THE hell" answered the profane
Mark; "and has the old woman practised
on it too?"
AYE, verilyp' quoted Dan.
And how long, my periumed blanket
sweater. have you cleause1 those foul
snags of yours with it?"
Nine years, family murnered Dan,
who was beginning to have suspicious
that his old dental companion was about
to leave him.
Mine years" said Mark, rubbing the
article on the soap. "Bully! If there is
anything l hate it is to break in new
toothbrush" And in quarter of a
second that almost hairless piece OF
ivory was exploring the cavern under
Marks nose. Dan could not brook the
insult. A boot-heel instantaneousy
sunk into Marks skull, and the two
great wits of Nevada were friends nc
more.