davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
WOuIdn't be Pleased.

Some time ago there lived in Ed
lnhurgh a well-known grumblel
named Sandy Black, whose often-re
curing fits of spleen or indigestion
produced some amusing scenes ot
senseless irritabllity which were
highly relished by all except the
brlte's good, patient little wife
One morning Sandy rose, bent on a
quarrel. The haddies and eggs were
excellent, done to a turn, and had
been ordered by himself the previ.
GUS evening, and breakfast passed
without the looked-for compliment
"Whstw will you have for dinner,
Sandy?" said Mrs. Black.
ga chicken, madam" said the
husband.
ttRaasted or boiled?"
"Confound 1t, madam, if you had
been good and considerate wife
you would have known before this
what liked" Sandy growled out,
and slsmming the door behind him
left the house. 1t was in the spring
and friend who was present heard
the little wife say:
"Sandy's bent on a disturbance to-
day; / shall not please him, do what
| can"
The dinner time came and Sandy
and his friend sat down to dinner.
The fish were eaten in silence, and,
on raising the cover of the dish be-
fore him, in towering passion he
cried out:
"Boiled chicken! 1 hate it, mad
am. A chicken boiled is a chicken
spoiled"
Immediately the cover was raised
for another chicken roasted to a
turn.
"Madam, won't eat roast chick
en-" roared Sandy; "you know how
it should have been cookedI"
At that instant a broiled chicken,
with mushrooms, was placed on the
table.
"WithOut green peass" rOared the
grumbler.
"Here they are, my DEAR" said
Mrs. Black.
"How dare you spend my money
in that way3"
'sFhey were present." said the
wife, interrupting him.
Rising from his chair and rushing
from the room, amid a roar of laugh
ter from his friend, he clinched his
fist and shouted:
"How dare you receive a present
without my leaveP"
Warrington Reporter.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
SUPPOSE

Suppose, my little lady,
Your doll should break Der head,
Could you make it whole BY crying
Till your eyes and nose were red
And wouldn't it Be pleasanter
To treat it as joke,
And say your glad twas doliy's
And not your head that broker
Suppose you're dressed for walking
And the rain comes pouring down.
VIII it clear of any sooner
Because you scold and froWnf
And wouldn't it be nicer
For you to smile than pout,
And so make sunshine in the house
When there's none without?
Suppose your task, my little man,
Is very hard to get,
Will it make it any easier
For you to sit and fret?
And wouldn't it be nicer
Than waiting like a Ounce,
To go to work in earnest
And learn the thing at once?
And suppose the world don't please you
Nor the WsY some people do,
Do you think the whole creation
VIII be altered Just for you?
And isn't it, my boy or girl,
The bravest, wisest plan,
Whatever comes or doesn't come,
To dothe best you cana-Ph9be Cary
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27

the worlds supply. Agriculturists have
begun the culture of the opium poppy in
New York and California, and have netted
twenty or thirty pounds to the acre, worth
seven to eight dollars per pound. 1t re-
quires no more cultivation than any garden
crop, and boy can cultivate half an acre
easily. Besides the opium, the plant Yields
an oil from its seeds superior, for table use
to olive oil. A Pennsylvania doctor Is
making arrangements to 60 into the eul-
tUre on large scale in Berks county, In
that State. American opium is said to
yield fully as large a per cent. Of morphia
as the foreign article, and under the slim
ulous of a short supply of the Turkish OPT
um, its culture may become an important
item in the list of American industries.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
sTARTTNG LIFE HUmRLY.
A Newly-Wedded Couple Take n Brfd-
al Tour AfOOE.

Rather an unique station-house
item is thus reported by the Jersey
City Journal: Last night a neatly
attired young lady stood up at the
Sergeant's desk in Oakland avenue
station. and asked for lodging. The
Sergeant put up his pen, pushed
back the ledger, hung his cap on the
other peg, took up his pen, dropped
it on the floor, went to the telegraph
box, wound up the clock, told Uncle
Ben to put on some wood and stop
the fire, and as if remembering some
thing, looked at the young lady and
said: "You wish-?"
oLodging, if you please, sir"
"Oh, yes, excuse me"
Then the Sergeant put the usual
questions of nativity, age, married
or single, read or write, place of
birth, trade-it was all printed and
be must FIJI the blanks-and the
neatest and best cell the tombs could
afford was nervously placed at the
pretty visitors disposal. Nothing
further was heard from the free
lodger until Just at daybreak the
next morning, when her fair face
appeared again at the Sergeant's
desk.
"Can l see my husband now,
please?" she said.
''Certainly, madam" F" was the po-
lite reply, and for three minutes the
spookish silence of the early morn
was unbroken.
"Well, won't you please call him
up for me?" she said, trying to bore
hole through the floor with the
heel of her right foot, "he came in
Just after l did last night"
"Oh, your husband Is here also, is
he? What is his nsme?"
"I've forgotten what name he told
me he would give. 1t wasn't his
right name; but he is here"
And the Sergeant went to the
door of the mems lodge and called
out for the husband of the young
wife. The seventeen dodgers raised
up on their elbows as one man, but
neither came to claim the lady.
"Guess he isn't here" said the
Sergeant, returning to the office.
The girl insisted that he was, and
would not be satisfied until the sew
enteen tired travellers were made to
come out and stand in row for her
inspection.
She ran her glances down the line
and began to cry. Pauses here and
there in the flood of tears, gradually
let out the whole secret. She had
been married at noon the day before,
New York justice receiving the
combined wealth of the pair for his
official service, and the young bride
and groom had started on their wed.
ding tour on foot. In Railway they
had some well-to-do friends, who
would make them welcome, but the
journey was too long a one for a
night, and the pair had concluded to
stop over, under assumed names, in
some police station. Oakland Tombs
was the one selected.
The sobs and the story had. thus
far progressed when the street door
hurriedly opened, and a young man,
who had declined the lodgers' ac-
commodations when shown him the
evening before, hurriedly entered
and said: 81 was Just outside wait
ing" The young bride stopped cry
ing, both politely thanked the Ser
geant, and with faces Wreathed in
smiles the happy pair walked lightly
away.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27

4 FARM of 81 acres, eligibly To-
a Gated on the Jefferson road, three miles
from Ashtabula and the L. s. & N. S. Railroad
and about equi-distant between the A, ]. &
F. and A, Y. & P. roads, in good condition as
to soil, fence, water, woodland, and orchard,
for sale on favorable terms. Inquire Of
Ashtabula. Oct. u. 1875. If JAMES REED
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
Tenohers, Eranat1aattons.
rFACHERs, EXAMINATIONS

TEACHERS EXAMINATIONS
L for the teachers of Common Schools OF
Ashtabula County viii be held during the
quarter ending Nay SGth, at the toloWlns
times and placess
PierpOnt, Tuesday, May ist, ISL,
Jefferson, Tuesday, May Sth, 1877.
Persons applying for teachers certificates
are requested to bring a certificate OF GOOD
moral character from the board Of local d.
rectors in their own district or from some one
Of the board OF Examiners.
Examinations open at O'Clock a m.
From a. m to 1870 q. m.-Arithmetic and
Reading.
From I1:3O a. m. TO I9 9m.-Theory and Prac-
tice.
From p. m. to 245 p. m.-Grammar.
From 245 p. m. to p. photography and
Spelling.
examinations in the several branches will
close promptly at the time designated.
Teachers are requested to bring cents for
postage, instead of a directed and stamped en-
Velope.
Bvorier ofthe Board of Examiners,
TS1S r. n MEANS Clerk Of Board.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
CHEESE.

and almost everything in the Grocery Line,
1cr sale at the
LOWEST BOTTOM PRICE FOR CASH.
GEO. WILLARD.
Ashtabula. Jan. 1877
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27

What's the matterp asked he; and
raising his head, discovered the frogs
dangling by leg in all directions.
why don't they eat themY be ex-
claimed. 1f they knew the con.
founded trouble l had to catch them,
in order to treat them to a dish of
their own country, they would find
that with me, at least, it was no jok-
ing matter. '"-From can Old Gen
tleman's Recollectlons," by HORACE
E. ScUDnER, in Hdrper's Magazine
for MdU.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27

Ex-Congressman John A. Kasson,
of Iowa, was on the 18th appointed
Minister to Spain. He will sail at
once. The appointment was made
by the advice Of Mr.. Evarts, with
out much political influence.
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
Farm for Sale!

n. B.-Imported Brandy, Rum, Gin and
Sherry Wine, Old Bourbon and Rye Whis-
kies; also all the popular Grape Wines 40
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
LEGAL.
Executors Notice.

NOTICE is hereby given that the
1 undersigned have been appointed Exec
utors on the estate Of Samuel Cole, late OF
Ktngsville, Ashtabula County, Ohio.
NJ. w. WRIGHT, r,,,oo,,t,,,
E. ]. CoMINGS, J r-Ne'u'oiS'
Kingsville, April l2, lsI7,
Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1877-04-27
SOUTH NEW Lyle.

Our friends from South New Lyme sent
US last week, the following listof Murphy
ite signers at that place, since the previous
publication, but not finding time or space
to give tenn place in that issue, we make
room for them in this No.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
~~~-~~~--$s~ O@ ss-~-~~~-~~~~
Nh TN.rnov 70 NfcoconL


Mn. TARBox, Of Massachusetts,
yesterday read Mr.. Foster, Of Ohio,
a timely and lively lesson, when he
raped him over the knuckles for the
impert;nent statement that "tbe peo-
pie of United States might expect
generous consideration from Presi-
dent Hayes" ''President' Hayes,
as Mr.. Foster somewhat prematurely
calls him, if he ever becomes Presi-
dent at all, will become President
precisely as Tittlebat Titmouse be-
came great land owner, in virtue of
a "technicality." He will know and
everybody will know that he has no
equitable claim TO the office and that
he accepted the Office knowing that
he had no such claim to it. To talk
about the generosity" of such a man
in such position, is like talking
about the liberality of a successful
burglar, who, having escaped Sing
Sing by technicality, should Offer
to bestow certain percentage of hi.
spoil on the St. Johns Guild or some
other popular charity.-[New York
World.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

Mrs. HAYES TRoUssEAU. - We
have no doubt our fair readers will
be pleased to know how the wife of
Mat. Wells Hayes will turn out to
celebrate the fraud Of her liege lord.
Here is the way that she is going to
do it:
"The inaugural dress will be of
elegant black silk, cut Princess in
style, and will be high in the throat,
with long sleeves, and, of course, full
train. 1t will be trimmed with black
velvet, blue satin and Valenciennes
lace, and, although rich and elegant,
is pronounced very plain. The cost
will be $500. The evening or recep
ton dress will be of Quaker gray,
with corsage waist, square neck, de.
mi sleeves, and full train. 1t will be
trimmed with Valenciennes lace
fringe, and flowers, and will cos,
$500. The morning dress will be o.
blue cashmere, handsomely trimmed
with silk of the same shade, with
fringe to match, with demi-train ant
Princess polonaise."
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
Proclamation BY the Gsvernsr.
EXECUTIVE DEPARTMENT
NEW ORLEANS,
March ., 18TH

Exrcu1lvE DEPARTMENT
NEW ORLEANS,
March ?, 1877,
30 THE PEOPLE OF LOUISIANA:
] congratulate you upon your law. g
abiding conduct during the past
months Of unprecedented anxiety and
trial.
The history Of that period, SO far
as you are concerned. has been but
the steady exhibition Of the highe,t
civic virtues.
The situation Of your affairs IS
this moment demands, more thvn
ever, the exercise of combined firm.
ness, moderation and devotion to
principle.
We now have the assurance that
our great commonwealth is about to
resume her rightful position il the
union Of States, and in the control Of
her own internal affairs.
You must, therefore, continue to
maintain the public peace, refrain
from all violence, and leave to those
who are charged with duties Of the
government the responsibility of en-.
forcing the laws.
In the future history Of our State,
let US recognize and respect the fact
that all class and race distinctions
before the law, are and shall remain
abolished.
Let US honestly accord to each cit.
izen, without any distinction, the full
measure of rights and the equal ben
eft and protection of the law, to the
end that all, under the blessing OF
God, may contribute to bring about
an era of good feeling, peace and
prosperity.
Now therefore, I, Francis T. N.ch-
oils, Governor of the State Of Lou
isiana, do issue this my proclama-
ton, enjoining upon all persons the
maintenance of peace, the obsery.
ance of law, and proper regard for
the rights Of all persons, and II re-
commend the cultivation of good
feeling, and a spirit of harmony
among all classes.
FRANCIS T. NICHOLS,
Governor of Louisiana.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
BlaCkWOOd.

Blackwood's Magazine for Febru-
airy, republished by the LEONARD
Scott Publishing Co., Al Barclay ST.,
New York, has long article on the
"Situation in America" which is
perhaps as correct as the accounts
written by foreigners of the political
complications in other countries gen
orally are.
The paper on philanthropy in
War" is written by soldier and phi
lanthropist, who was active in re
lieving those WHO suffered during the
Franco German war. He explains
the relief systems adopted by var.
ious countries, and discusses the
question as to the legitimate nature
of this kind of neutral help.
The article entitled "New Books
notices several recently published
biographies, the first in order, and the
most interesting of which, is thu
life of Scotch Naturalist
by Samuel Smiles. The sketch o
his life and character here given il
we'll worth reading. ''It is the story
of poor shoemaker, who is ia
nous natural philosopher withou
ceasing to make shoes, or attaining
in his old age to any seat more easy
than that of the familiar bench"
Part TX of the "Woman- Halter
leaves us in doubt whether fev
more chapters will finish the story
or whether, like the book, it will g
on forever.
(, A new serial, Pauline" is com
menced in this number. The hero
inc appears to be a person of de
termined, not to say obstinate char
acter, and the indications are tina
she will meet with a series of inter
esting adventures.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
THE WESTMINSTER REyIEV.

The Westminster Review, January
1877, reprinted By the Leonard Scott
Publishing Co., Al Barclay Street.
New York, contains as follows:
/. "a Ministry of Justice"
II. "The Warfare of Science.''
III. "The Factory and Workshop
Acts"
w. "The life of the Prince Con.
Sort"
v. "The Turkish Question: Rus.
sian Designs, and English Promoter, &
of them"
vi. "John Locke"
VII. "Independent Contribution.
The financial Difficulties of the Gov.
eminent of India"
VIII. Contemporary Literature.''
The first article gives brief state.
ment of the scope and Importance Of
the science of Jurisprudence and the
place which that science, and the ad. !
ministration of law and justice in &C.
cordance with it, ought to hold in re.
gard to the general government and
administration of tie state.
!
1t is followed by very favorable
notice of a work by DR.. White, Pres.
ident of Cornell University, on the
struggle between science and relig-
ion. The writer points out numer.
Gus fights, in all of which he consid.
ers that science has been victorious.
The long article on the Turkish
Question" endeavors to show that the
present dangerous crisis is due, not
to Turkish disagreement, which
united Europe could easily deal with,
but to exclusive designs of Russia,
incompatible with any such settle.
ment.
John Locke is here spoken Of as
one Of the "bright particular stars
of the latter part of the seventeenth
century, and the author is called 50
good biogrspher," to whom the Eng
lish public is deeply indebted for the
picture he has brought before them.
The work is not merely a biography
but. contains an analysis of Locke's
: writings.
For the sake of facilitating the ex-
preston of opinion by able and cul-
tivated men, limited part of the
, Westminster Review is sometimes
reserved for articles, which, thou h
harmonizipg with it in ageneral way
may differ from it in partiular opin-
/. ions. One of these articles which
are called "lndependedt Contribu.
ton" on the Financial Difficulties
Of the Government Of India ap.
pears in this number. AS usual, d
large space is devoted to notices ol
Contemporary Literature.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

A New method that cures
Coughs, Colds, Bronchitis and Con-
sumption, DR.. j. H. McLean's Cough
and Lung Healing Globules. AS
they dissolve in your mouth, a heal
ing gas is generated and inhaled, per,
meates and comes in direct contact,
will cure Throat and Lung diseases.
Trial boxes, by mail, % cents. DR..
j. H. Mclean, 3l4 Chestnut street,
St. Louis, Mo.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

"A LITTLE four-year-old boy who
had been taught his letters at home
and felt his Importance on going to
school was called up by the teacher,
who asked: "Can you read I" The
little fellow stood amazed for moment
and then exclaimed: "Hain't you got
cheek -
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
PAS BEN.

Several of the New Orleans Jour-
nails, in announcing the appointment
by Governor Nichols, on the recon-
of the Justices of the Su'
preme Court, of Mr.. Percy Roberts,
ESQ.,, to be Reporter of the decisions
of that State Tribunal Of last resort,
are very felicitous and Mandatory in
sounding the praises, no doubt meri-
ted, of the appointee. Without de-
string for single moment to gain
say the justice of these praises, still
we cannot forget and omit to mention
that the gentleman removed to make
place for Mr.. Roberts is, and shonld
be so we'll known in all the attributes
possessed and needed for the position
in question, that we are regretfully
astonished that no mention should
be made Of it, and that he has been
permitted to be retired unhonored
and unmentioned. We desire here
to make this mention and to fill the
void that has been so unceremonl-
ously and silently forced to linger on
the passing roll of honor.
We are sure our readers in old Ra-
pides, and particularly the old Dem
ocrats and old Wings will remember
favorably the mention of that hon
ored name and gifted gentleman, and
will in their grateful remembrance,
state that they are glad that the
DEMOCRAT should not permit the re-
moval to pass unnoticea, particular
ly when the young rising orb is Sc
lavishly noticed. Well, readers, the
gentleman removed is no less than
the Hon. Charles Gayarre, a gentle
man of unblemished purity, scholar
of highest culture and attainments, {
historian of we'll earned reputation
, and though last not least, a Demo
crat with a spotless and consistent
record; and we assert without reser
walton, that it is doubtful whethe
E any man in the State could so abb.
and efficiently grace and fill the pc
= culiar position he has been removed
s from. We state this much, and ar
i. sure the removal Of such man
bears US out in our position. and W
t are sorry that our home quillotine
poised by pure Executive hands
e should have decapitated one not i
Y the least meriting so marked and sc
s we're rebuke, and to it we are force
s to enter our solemn and humble pre-
: test
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

-MR. HESS, late of the firm oil
Goodman and Hess, of the Excelsior,
has rented the Green Room, the So,
cial Hall, and the three magnificent
rooms overhead, from j. Levin, and
is under full Roadway at his new
home, and will be pleased to welcome
his old clientele, and as many new
friends as it can bring to MIN.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

TIE s'outiook for Nicholls,' as
the New Orleans Times calls it, from
the stand point Of the contractors
and hargainers in behalf of so called
poor Louisiana, has the following for
q start:
"'ro be brief, the "long' dispatch
contained certain propositions made
to the gentlemen named by leading
Republicans and those by the way
authorized to speak for Gov. Hayes,
the propositions being in substance
that first, if The rights of the colored
people were guaranteed; second, ii
the election of United States Sena-
tor, or Senators, be postponed for a
short time and third, that if a mode
rate Republican be elected, then
Governor Hayes, if inaugurated
when !inangurated will withdraw the
troops, and while he would not for
mally recognize Nichols, he woult
not recognize Packard, and would
leave the matter of recognition to bs
settled by the people of the Stat,
alone, thus indicating that they coult
pay their taxes to and support thei
choice. AS far as is known, there
were no objections to an acceptance
Of such terms and by this tim
Messrs. Ellis and Levy have been no
titled of the fact.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

ELIZA Pinkston will be promo
ted by his Fraudulency to a chief
clerk-ship in the Treasury building,
and it may turn out that like Mrs.
Christiaucy she may nab some old
codger in his decadence.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

WONDER if Mr.. Hayes will act
like the receiver of stolen goods,
who can compose himself to sleep at
night by pulling the sheet over his
headf
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

THE last item about that trade
and bargain, assures us that nothing
is pledged or said about a U. S. Sen
ator, but we are told graciously that
we will be permitted to elect whom
we please.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
The past week, up to our pres

The past week, up to our pres
ent writing, has been an exciting one
politically, anal we have had hard
road to travel among the new fam
gled meshes Of the many crossroads,
by paths a:d winding lahyrinths
mapped out fer us here in Louisiana,
which have been handled BY our NEW
and high contracting Warwicks.
Personally we see them on their
winding ways and smell plainly some
other fresh Wheeler pi:fall, some new
Compromise, another Gougc fixture,
some tacit "bargain and corruption,'
by which we are once more to be
manacled, humilitated, and made to
succumb at the loss Of principle, at
the desertion Of National standard
bearers, all for q home pittance bad
ly tinctured with doubtful virtue or
any coming good. We are patiently
hiding our time, and are eagerly Gu.
rious, after all "them curses to see
where that treason comes in. We
hope not like the young chickens
coming home to roost. Nous verrons
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07

One of CRAFTS acts was to 60
back on a friend; this he did by
kicking Beckwith out of the District
Attorueyship, and replacing him
NTH G. S. Lacey
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1877-03-07
Our Packet Bart. Able only

Our Packet Bart. Able only
reached home yesterday morning,
fully "a hours behind her usual time,
having experienced awful weather
and continued fogs. But her mans
gers have the pluck and workers to
regain this delay, and be in regular
line next Monday morning. She
will leave here early tomorrow.
Her obliging clerks, as usual, made
US up our usual bundle of papers.