The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1877-06-13
A Panorama of the War.

| From tho Burlington Hawkeye.
! This is a street-scene in Kars. We
don't know who seen it, but we know it
was saw. Probably some Russian car
it. The city is in state of siege. The
gentleman in the foreground, feeling
over his head for the ground, is private
gentleman in Cossack regiment. He is
not feeling very we'll. lie is ill. A mo-
ment ago he met a tiftecn-inch shell, and
was too busy to get out Of the way His
stomach, lungs, and swallowing thing
went on with the shell, and he will
never smile and never enjoy square
meal again. His comrades wish to send
for the doctor. He 'clines. He says
he does not need him. He is right He
can die without him. The doctor will
weep when he learns til, Cossack is dead.
He will bend over his lifeless form, and
then he will weigh it, and put it in an
item, to the last ounce, as tumor he
removed from gentleman in Scott
County. Truly, in the midst of life we
are in debt.
The gentleman in g"nny-bag trousers
and long pipe is a Turk. He is the
friend of the American Journalist who uses
him to make puns of. He will not last
much longer at the rate the American
journalist is using him up. This is all
that anybody knows about the Turk or
Turkey. Move the panorama on.
That is Russian general. See the
wide landscape stretching away in the dim
distance. Let her stretch-it doesn't cost
us anything. You cannot see the Rus
| sian general for his name, but he's there
all the same. You can smell his breath.
He eats tallow candles. This makes him
ight-hearted. His name comes in by the
big rock on the left, follows the course of
the meandering brook in the valley, winds
slowly up the mountain side, and disap-
pears in the direction of Ulpblowitch. 1t
is nine miles long, without titles. When
his mother used to call him up to break
fast, she started at nine o'clock D. m, took
a long breath, and talked it off till morn
ing.
This is a telegraph office. The bright
looking young man at the table is a
Western Union operator. The little brass
and steel thing ticking away on the table
is the instrument. The operator is very
easily distinguished from the instrument
He cannot talk so fast as the instrument,
but he can sleep great deal more. He
is going to sleep now. The man leaning
over the counter is heartless citizen
who has the cheek to ask the operator to
send dispatch for him. The operator
takes the message. But he does not send
it. He hasn't time. He loses nine games
of checkers while that citizen IS wonder
ing why he doesn't get any reply to his
dispatch. Then the citizen starts out to
walk to the place and sees the man. He
finds him, and, soon after they meet, the
| dispatch comes along. The citizen re-
members and recognizes it. He is affected
to tears. The operator finds him, and
charges him 40 cents for sending the
message, 45 cents for the wear and tear of
the instrument, so cents for the strain on
nervous system, go cents for collecting
rate on message, Is cents on general
principles. He learns afterward that the
citizen yet has some money left, and he
is going back in the morning to borrow
it OF him.
This is Constant O'Nople. He is the
leader of the muscle-men. All the
O'Noples are muscular men. Constant
O'Nople isn't aftaid of St. Petersburg.
He isn't even afraid of b-d-burg. The
sound of the bucksheesh is heard in the
distance.
This is a Christian martyr in Rouma-
MIA. He leans up against the awning
post, and remarks that there isn't any use
in Roumaniang around there any longer.
He is book-agent. He has been kicked
down three pair of stairs, chased through
an alley, bit by two dogs, been hit by a
poker, slapped with boot-jack, had a
lump raised on him with barrel stavc
been punched into cistern, got lost
twice in strange streets, been arrested
four times on charges of vagrancy and on
general suspicion, been chased out of
town once as a swindler, whipped by a
drayman, robbed of his watch, lost his
hat, been called $4,000 different kinds
Of names, and sold two books, one of
which the man took and never paid him
for, and on the other he made a gross
profit of 50 cents. He is not rich, is this
b0ok-agcnt. You may publish book Of
your own you will want sold some day.
The isle of Greece. "The isles of
Greece, where burning Sappho loved and
sung" The isles of Greece are probably
kerosene isles. +. The isles where Sappho
burned were undoubtedly the same kind.
Started the kitchen fire with them. There
is the lie i'll the gallon .tincan under the
table. That is Sappho swearing at the
stove because it won tsdraw, and looking
fol-. the kerosene. She is going to make
balloon ascension in few minutes, and
just as like as not she will forget to go
outdoors before she starts up through the
roof into the blue cerulean dome above.
The aislas whore she loved md sl1no worn