The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1877-01-16
A RACE FOR THE TRAIN.

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When they reached the depot Mr.
Man and his wife gazed with unspeaka-
BILE disappointment at the receding train,
which was just pulling away from the
bridge switch at the rate Of q thousand
miles minute. Their 6rst impulse was
to run after it, but as the train was out
of sight and whistling for Sagetown be-
fore they could act upon the impulse,
they remained the carriage, and dis
consolately turned the horses heads|
homeward.
1T oil comes Of having TO wait for .
woman to get ready" Mr. Man broke In
iwiths grimly. 80
8: vss Hsay before yog wsse,,' Fss
'plied. his h * q
"Great heavensl' cried MI. Man, In
irrepressible impatience, jerking the hor
ses' jaws out Of place, ..just listen to
that. And sat out in the buggy ten
minutes, yelling at you to come along
until the whole neighborhood heard
mew
Yes" acquiesced Mrs Man, with the
provoking placidity which no one can
assume but woman, sand every time
l started down stairs you sent me back
for something you had forgotten"
Mr.. Man groaned. '
This is too much to BEAR" be said,
"when every body knows that If l was
going to Europe would just rush into
the house, put on clean shirt, grab up
my grip sack, and fy while you would
want at least six months preliminary
preparations, and then dawdle around
the whole day before starting, uutileyery
train had left town. sser -
Well, the upshot of the matter was
that the Mans put off their visit to Au-
rora until next week, and it was agreed
that each one should get him or herself
ready, and 60 down to the train and go,
and the one who had failed to get ready
should be left. The day of the match
came around in due time The train
was to go q. 10 80, and Mr.. Man, after
attending to his business, went home a,
8 :45 rfn '~@s.f s-ty sas-sfr9.si
Snow, them" he shouted, "only three
quarters of an hour till train time. Fly
around; fair field and no favors, you
know a gal he
And away they few. Mr. Man bulged
into this room, and rushed through that
one, and dived into one closet after an.
other with inconceivable rapidity, chuck
ling all the time to think how cheap
Mrs Man would feel when be started
off alone. He stopped on his way up
stairs to pull off his heavy boots to save
time. For the same reason he pulled of
his coat as be ran through the dining
room, and hung it on corner of the
silver closet Then he jerked off his
vest, as he rushed through the hall, and
tossed it on hook in the hat-rack, and
fby the time he reached his own room
he was ready to plunge into his clear
clothes. He pulled out bureau-draw
er, and began to paw at things like 8
Scotch terrier after rat. 81
Eleanor" he shrieked, "where ART
my shirts 2"
"In your drawer" calmly replied Mre
Man, who was standing placidly before
a glass, calmly and deliberately eoaxins
q refractory erimp into place. 17
"Well, by thunder, they ain't!" shout
ed Mr Man, a little annoyed. "I'v'
emptied every last thing out Of th'
drawer, and there isn't thing in it tha
ever saw before" "e9
Mrs. Man stepped back few PAGES
held her head on one side, and after sat
isfying herself that the crimp would dc
and would stay where she putt, replied
"Those things scattered around tn,
doer are all mine. Probably you haven
been looking in your own drawer"
taa'sI don't see," testify observed MI
, Man, "why you couldn't have put m,
things out for me when you hadn't moth
ing else to DO all morning. .'a ho.s
"Because," said Mrs. Man, settin,
herself into an additional article of raj
. ment with awful dellberation, "nobod
7 put mine out for me, A fair field an
no favors, my dear" s''as
. Mr.. Man plunged into bis shirt like
bull at a red flag.
Foul" he shouted, in malicious tr
= umph mo button on the neck! J"
ssBecause," said Mrs Man. sweet
after a deliberate stare at the 6dgetinl
: impatient man, during which she buttor
ed her dress aud put eleven pins wher
they would co the most good, "becaus
> you have got the shir. on wrong sid
+ OUT. = sas
i When Mr.. Man slid out of that shi
O be began to sweat He dropped tt
II shirt three times before he got it on, an
il while it was over his head he heard ii
II clock strike ten. When his head cam
e through he saw Mrs. Man coaxing tt
ends and hows of her necktie.
q "Where's my shirt studs r he erie,
nj Mrs Man went into another roor
q and presently returned with her GLOW,
and hat, and saw Mr.. Man emptying .
ID the boxes he could find in and about IL
bureau. Then she said:
lie ''In the shirt you took of"
,e Mrs. Man put on her gloves, viii
s Mr.. Man hunted up and down the roo
for his cuff buttons.
htl Eleanor" he snarled, at last, 81 b
liepe you know where those butto
n are"
he 81 haven't seen them," said the lad
r settling her hat; 'didn't you lay the
he down on the window-sill in the sittin
ed room last nieht?'
r Mr.. Man remembered, and he we
down stairs on a run He stepped I
one of his boots. and was immediate
ts landed in the hall at the bottom OF t
ce stairs with neatness and dispatch, atte
u, ded in the transmission with mo
a bumps than he could count with
he Weh5's adder. and landed with bal
er like the He'll Gate explosion. ,s7'E
al "Are you ready, Algernona" ask
xy the wife of his family, leaning over I
lie banisters N ~ VISA
ad The unhappy man greaned.
"Can't yon throw me down the 9th
boot?' lie asked. iiEeHs .i'.- l
a Mrs. Man pityihgly kicked it to hi
d. "My valise p he inquired, as he tu
be ged away at the boot. M
in "Up in your dressing ROOM" she a.