The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1877-05-11
PITH AND POINT.

ENOUGH for one, two much for two,
and nothing at all for three? A Sc
cret.
ALL the good don't die young, for
many lawyers and editors live to a good
old age.
THE tradition of the first Chinaman,
Fohi, reaches up 4,700 years. How is
that, Fohi?
WHY is the letter "g" like wisdom
Because it is the beginning of greatness
and goodness.
WHY is the wick of candle like
Athens Because it is in the midst of
grease (Greece).
WHAT is that which has neither flesh
nor bone, and yet has four fingers and
thumb? A glove.
A YOUNG woman we know just wants a
chance to prove that she could live hap
PLY with a mother-in-law.
WHY is Old England, transposed, like
California? Because, by putting the 6
first, you make it Golden land.
THE Cincinnati mother whose baby
took the first prize is said to feel little
mad because the judges hesitated.
WHY is tattler very unlike mirrors
Because the one speaks without re-
fecting, the other reflects without speak
ing.
MARRIED, at Brattleboro, March %,
by Rev. VIM. Brown, John Sard to
Mary Dean. And now they are Sard-
Deans-only two in box.
"WHAT relation is that gentleman to
you z" said one lady to another. She an
swered, "His mother was my mothers
only child" Who was he !? Her son.
A CONTEMPORARY asks, care American
girls delicate?" 1t depends very much
whether you offer them cocoanut cake
and ice cream, or bar of soap and
washboard.
"MRs. PARF, of this village" says a
Wisconsin exchange, "has had no less
than seventy attacks of illness during
her lifetime, and still lives" She must
be one of the Brave women of seventy
sicks."
ONE does not desire to be personal,
but if the young man who sat in the
chair where a lady had left dish of
maple sugar to cool at the festival the
other evening will return the saucer he
will save himself further trouble.
FAREWELL, Tupper, bard and brother
We shall never thee more,
Till our spirits greet each other,
Gathered on the shining shore;
But though fate has thus bereft us,
Plunged us into deep distress,
Childs and Holland stu are left u.s.
They shall make our sorrow less.
-Nep York sun.
WHEN the head of the family comes
home at shockingly late hour, deposits
his weary self on the top of the piano,
and while gently tinkling the keys with
his major toe murmurs something about
the annoyance of q squeaking bed, it is
entirely safe to draw conclusions.
A MAN who appeared to have 2,37S, 102
pounds of care on his mind called in at
drug store last week and called for
strengthening plaster to put on his back.
Rheumatism ?" queried the clerk.
"Wall, no." replied the Roman, "not
exactly; but my wife, she's been hintin'
about whippin' the parlor carpet and
takin' down the sittin room stove, and
L know just what's comm.
THEY had been welded but two short
years. "Do you very much like to have
me kiss you, George?" she said, softly
stopping over him and leaving the mono
gram of her lips on his marble brow.
g do, indeed, DEAR" he said. 81 just
shut my eyes and try to think 1 feel the
touch of one who was dear to me in the
days gone by, before you and L were
married." He had hardly finished that
remark before copy of Worcester un-
abridged hit him suddenly three or four
times on the spot where he had been
kissed