Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1877-08-25
LOVE AND ICE CREAM.
Tho Capacity ofa Girl In Love Just Fly
plules.

Tho Capacity ora Girl In Love Just Flv'
Plates.
There is some affinity between lovers
ana ice cream. just what it is or why
has never been disclosed and yet re-
mains problem for tho consideration o.
Tyndall and Huxley. writer, whose
name is unfo, tunately lost, having be-
como erased from the roll Of honor by
age, has computed that girl who has
been two or three times in love can cor
raj five dishes Of ice cream at sitting.
This is somewhat discouraging to the
beaux and renders it necessary that the
young ladies' should observe secrecy con-
cerning their love affairs lest they should
become objects OF terror to the young
men until their day of grace is frittered
away. But there is subtle instinct
that prompts the young lover to indulge
the passion of the object of his affections.
No matter how unsophisticated he may
he or how little knowledge of tho world
and Of women he may have this unseen
prompter whispers in his ear:
II thou wouldst be loved give her ice cream.
This psychological fact has not escaped
the notice Of designing men, who have
encouraged and fostcred this passion and
turned it to their own advantage as
caterers to it. The last and most am
bilious schemer has invented n patent
scoop which is warranted to retain the
precious mixture while it is carried some
distance to some secluded spot, where in
silence and apart the loving twin may
devour it. The idea was bright one,
and was, of course, eagerly snatched at
by lovesick swains. But, alas
Whoever thinks perfect work to see
Thinks what ne'er was, nor is nor eer shall be.
Jacksonville, Ind, furnishes the VIC
tim. What so soothing to his burning
heart as the cooling ice cream sliding
down his @sophagus1 So it became his
custom to carry one of these new-fangled
scoops filed with the seductive concoc-
ton to the house of "the maid his heart
had singled from the world" and they
would ramble to some "fowery dell,"
where, with none to molest or make them
afraid, they would surround the delicacy.
But every dog has his day, and the time
came when the iron entered into the
vitals Of this young man. He had pur-
chased scoopeul of the frigid nectar a
lew evenings since and was proceeding
On his way to the residence of his charm
Il, with love and anticipation in his heart
md the scoopful of ico cream in his
land, when Ae met her coming with an
'ther fellow to procure that which salts
led her longing as nothing else could do.
it was from sudden emotion,
" whether he feared that his heart might
rack if too suddenly cooled, he hastily
hoved the scoop into his pantaloons
'ocket. Then it was that the hitherto
aithful scoop failed him, and he became
onvinced of the vanity of mans inten-
ions and woman's constancy. Tilted by
he woman he loved and betrayed by
ew-fangled ice cream scoop, how the
ride of his life oozed away-ran down
nd filled his boots His love for the girl
lelte1 like the ice cream in his pocket,
nd the light of his life disappeared with
he polish on his boots. Seldom have
'e been called upon to sympathize with
sadder fate or to mourn over so much
weetness so suddenly dispelled. He
ho but few short moments before had
tarted forth with proud heart and
ell-filled scoop returns with blasted
Elections and a boot full of skinned
I'll