The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1877-01-25

. to treat scratches on other people
but he couldn't take time to remem
Der what the best remedy was, ant
so between scratches he rushed
over to DR.. Abernathy's office ant
wiggled up to DIR. A. and told hin
if he didn't relieve him at once
he'd scratch out. The news by thi:
time had spread over town and the
doctors came fiocking in to help re
lieye DIR. B. if possible-Drs. Grant
Wilson, Gordon, Stanley, Sumpter
Alternately, &c.-all circling around
the patient like buzzards around 8
cow carcass. DR.. Alternately con-
sidered it his case, but he felt called
upon to have a con sultating dag
nosis. They examined carefully,
squinted at it, rubbed it, scratched
it, patted it, &c, and then all
looked wise in concert and conclud-
ed to tell off, each man knowing
that he was right. DR.. Grant pro-
nounced it Pytiriasis and DR.. Will
son Psoriasis or Impetigo, and they
advised an active catharsis with
topical application of glycerine cum
acidum carbolicum. DR.. Steele de-
clared it bad case of Elephantia-
sis and recommended the Hot
Springs and scrape the back down
with a piece of glass. DIR. Gordon
solemnly avowed that it was clear
case of Pemphigus and recon-
mended iodo-bromide of calcium
DR.. Sumpter snatched off his coat
and spurted out whirlwind of
words, from which it appeared that
he thought it was Prurigo or Her
pes Circinatus or Erysipelas Ambu-
lans, and he started for his medi-
cine to cure it. DR.. Alternately said
it was Eczema and that pure car
bolic acid would snatch the filling
out of it. There are about sixty
other skin diseases and DR.. Bate
would doubtless have had all of
them if there had been that many
doctors there, but these were
enough to kill him, and so they
stopped and went to work. It.was
DR.. Abernathy's case, and when he
had patiently listened and ascer-
tanned to his satisfaction that the
other doctors didn't know what they
were talking about, he looked at the
door to see If it was opened wide
enough for them all to get out at
once, and then looked at them to
see whether they were starting, but
they didn't 20. He then called for
the carbolic aeid ;...d feather and
concluded to try it on his breast,
where the disease had spread. The
other doctors stood back, except
DR.. oumpter, who, while the others
were spending breath and exhaust
ing the dictionary, had gotten him
a turkey wing and quart bottle of
iodine and waltzed in like storm.
DR.. Alternately didn't imagine any
one would dare interfere with bis
case, and was quietly rubbing the
breast with his acid, when he was
astonished to see DR.. Sumpter put
ting in on the back.
Hold on, Sumpter, let me try
this" said he.
"Nev-min'-go head, go head
plenty surface 'roun' here. BY
George, cure t certain said DIR.
Sumpter in a breath, as he dipped
the turkey wing in the iodine and
swabbed it up and down the back
like he was white-washing a smoke
house.
A coal of fire is a luxury COM
pared with pure carbolic acid, and
salt and vinegar soothing compared
with iodine, and here sat DIR. Bate
with these merciless doctors pep
pering his poor, mutilated flesh,
that was already scratched and torn
as if it had been run through a
carding machine, quivering and
groaning in pain, but submitting for
sciences sake. They finally got
through, helped him on with his
clothes and he got home, enduring
the pain in the happy thought that
it would quit as soon as it eat all
the flesh off and then there would
be nothing to scratch. When he
got home he took three pills and
fell into fitful slumber and dreamed |
that his back was a sweet potato |
patch and it was dark night and a
thousand and sixty-fve niggers
were in the patch grubbing potatoes,
and he walked up the next morning
salivated. He had taken off the
cardinal shirt and put on one softer
and creased, and lay in the bed
eight days getting over the effects
of the carbolic acid and iodine. and
when he got up he scaled off like
snake in the spring and left his
shell in the bed. When his wash
ing came in the next week the wo-
man explained what seven doctors
had failed to do by telling that she
had found a chicken feather stuck
in the back of the shirt with the
sharp end towards the skin, and
this had caused all the trouble.
We advise the Medical Society to
take up the subject of skin diseases
and learn more about it, and when
they get a case to always look for
feather in the shirt before they ex
pertinent.
Enterprising Lads.