The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1877-08-23
At the Detroit Police Court.
ONE OF THE BoARDERs.

ONE OF THE BOARDER0.
"NoT guilty, your Honor, and I'll tell
you how it was" began Charles Martin
Rose. "I've been boarding up ON Croghan
street. We don't get half enough to eat.
there's no ice to keep things cool, and the
flies are awful"
Estate how many flies there are in tina,
house." said the Court.
II can't do it, sir-they are measured
by the bushel. Well, last night when we
sat down to supper there were flies in the
butter, in the tea, In the milk, and thou.
sands of flies tumbling over the bread and
cold meat don't like it, sir, and told
the landlady I didn't, and when she
called me chickadee. man packed my
trunk. She wouldn't let me take it away,
and SO we had fuss. She tore my col.
lar off and pushed me over q chair, and
I believe I pinched her arm. If there
had been no flies there would have been
no fuss"
Mature created the fly and pronounced
Flies have just as much right in this
world as you or l."
"But / don't want 'cm around me-"
But perhaps you are in the way of the
fly as much as he is in your way. Fly OF
~ n.y. yVu 40AoCu sAAV AOWS 0uu 0u0Il
have to fine you five dollars. We can't
get through fife and not meet with annoy.
aaces. I've had boils when knew they
weren't at all necessary, I've had the ague
when no one else in the county had q touch
of it. Flies have bothered me, and ON
seven different occasions the doctors have
pronounced me q dead man. Am I not
living yet-am not fat and happy and
contented"
Here's your money, and I'll Gie be-
fore I'll let flies eat off my platev' NUT
tered the prisoner as he reached for his
hat. Some Of the boys sympathized with
him, and when he went out one of them
followed at his heels and earnestly in
quired:
"Don't you think the flies of this c0un.
try are sapping the life. blood of indus
ryi"
BROTHER GARDNER.
The many friends of this aged colored
philosopher will be sorry to learn that he
was forced to appear at the bar of JUS
tice on charge Of disturbing the peace.
He was somewhat cast down, but he
quickly rallied for defense.
You see, ledge, dar's heap o. fam
'lys in dis town whar de old folks don't
zactly agree togedder, an one o. dem FAM
'lys is mine. I own right up de corn,
ledge, an confess dat de ole oman an
myself don't agree for shucks. She's
drefful sot in her ways, an l'zc .irefful
hight toned in my ways, an dat keeps one
o. us on de outside Oh de house mos de
time"
swell, what started this fuss yester-
days."
"lze comm to dat right away, ledge.
De ole lady wanted to 60 on steamboat
'scursiOn an leave me home to keep
house. I wanted to 60 on dat same
STEAMBOAT 'scursiOn an leave hnr home to
keep house. Dat was de s;to ,tion. sab.
We was boat on de ragged aige, you see,
an de upshot was dat we boat started for
the 'scursion an left the house to run it.
self. On de way down we boat get mad,
an when dat oman, who had sworn to
love an perfect me 10 de end, hit me on
de knee wild fence picket, why, l rcse
s'perior to de occasion, an cuffed her ears
till she fought all de fire. bells were sound
in gineral alarm. OATS de hull case in
q hOgshead, Jedge."
Brother Gardner was talked to in q faith.
erly way, and on his promise to make
every reasonable effort to WOO the doves
OF peace to his cabin, he was allowed to
depart.-DetrOit Free Press.