davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Dead-Heads I!

There are people in every commu-
atty who think that every newspaper
man is dead-hesd. The New York
Evening Post hits this class of people
q severe back handed blow which we
think they well deserve. "In case
snything happens to a person, he
hastens to the nearest newspaper and
demands that the editor shall WELD
his pen and shed Ink in his vindica-
tion and defense. And If the jaded
editor does not with elacrity espouse
the cause of his patron he will make
an enemy for life. Members of the
press are literally hunted down by all
sorts of people who have axes to
grind. The managers of public meet
ings who do not find reporters at the
desk suffer pangs of disappointment; ;
the judge who sonoriously blows his
nose before reading his opinion. looks
aDxiously for the stenographer; the
preacher who descants upon some
special subject, loses spirit If the rep
aresentavies of the press are not there;
even the burglar on his way to States
prison, covets a talk with the news
paper man. Yet the outside barbarian
thinks all newspaper men are dead
heads" and envy them the fine times
they have in the way of free tickets
TO all manner of shows. There never
was a greater mistake. People don't
seem to realize that on the part of the
1t is merely a matter of
business that the reporter goes to
these places, 60 attractive to outsiders,
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Ashamed of Himself.

A sarpy county harvest hand, who
had just been paid off and bad about
SO in his possession, came to town
Thursday and put up at the mansion
of Hattie Washington (colored.) In
the morning his money was minusan
he complained at the police court.
When the room was almost full of
idle spectators, Judge Anderson had
the woman brought In, and told the
harvest hand to look around and see
If he could see her. He looked all
over the ceiling, and be looked all
over the crowd. and he was looking
all over the crowd-when he did see
her. The sight made him feel asham-
ed of himself, and without any more
ado he scooted through the back win
dow of the court room, was around
the building and went out Sixteenth
street for all he was worth, followed
by peals of laughter from the crowd.
who thoroughly appreciated the situ-
alton. He returned In a few hours
and explained that he was ashamed to
have so many people know how wick
ed he was.-Onaahd Republican.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Kaiser williams Habits.

He rises at six or half-past six, ap-
pears on the promenade about eight,
drinks water at the prescribed inter
walls until half-past nine, then break
fasts, and every-other-day also takes a
bath between half-past ten and half
past eleven. During the morning he
receives civil and military reports,
dimes about four, generally inviting
company, and then receives report
on foreign affairs, a Cabinet courier
arriving every morning, and the tele-
graph office being open day and night.
If an interval remains before the the
atre the Emperor takes an airing, and
about half-past seven appears on the
promenade, then attends the play,
next takes tea, and about half-past ten
retires to his narrow from bedstead.
unless business detains him till eleven
or half-past eleven.-COlOgne Gazette.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
A Remarkable Story.

A Confederate soldier from the val
ley of Virginia, In one of the battles
of the late civil war, was struck In the
head with a mimic ball. The ball
passed through the skull, and the sur
geons afraid to probe the wound In
search of 1t, left the man to die. In
the course of time he recovered, but
had lost his reason, and was sent to
the insane asylum at Staunton, where
he remained for eleven years. At
length DR.. Fauntleroy, an eminent
physician of that city, obtained per-
mission from the the asylum authori-
ties and friends of the insane man to
make a surgical examination Of the
head, with the hope Of finding the
ball. He was successful, and found
the ball imbedded on the inside of the
skull and pushing against the braiE.
Unable to extract 1t with any instru-
ment at hand, he took a ohisel and
mortised It out. AS soon as the ball
was removed reason resumed its con-
troll, and the deranged one was in his
right mind. He says that he is not
conscious of anything that occurred
during the interval of eleven years
from the time he was struck on the
battlefield to the moment the press
ure was removed from the brain, all
was blank to him.- Wheeling Regis
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

The charge is probably true. and the
arrest is unquestionably in the inter-
ests of good government and decent
morals. 1t was for the refusal 10 COM
mission this scOundrel as Judge that
Gov. Chamberlain lost the good will
of the Supreme Court of South CARROLL
na-the Chief Justice being the scoun-
drel's father. Now 1t is reported that
Moses will be let off without prosecu-
ton, aud that he will be used as wit
ness to implicate Gov. Chamberlain
and other in the frauds which he COM
mitted. He is a scoundre! unworthy
of belief on oath-St Joe Herald.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Married His Grandmother.
Nelson (Ky.) Record.

Nelson (Ky.) Record.
This Is an age of progress. James
Parton, the biographer, married his
step daughter. John Downs, Of Mel
son county, married his step-mother,
but it was reserved for Dode Chester,
of Walton's Lick, Washington county
to outstrip them all in matrimonial
feat. Last week he married his grand
mother. Dode Chester is twenty-five
years of age, son of Rev. J. NJ. Ches-
ter, the well known Baptist preacher
and grandson of VIM. Chester. Some
years since the latter died, leaving a
buxom widow of forty-five summers,
and now his grandson has done what
probably no man ever did before-
married his step grandmother.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Pigeon English is all the rage with
Boston girls, and when an escort leaves
one of them at her papa's front steps
he is startled to hear something like
this: 'Hoop-la-Melican man he heap
much nice--fetchee me home ale light
topside up on slippely walk-buy gum
dlops-comee you allie same gin some
time-you savey, eh, John p
And she disappears within the
storm doors, leaving the perplexed
young man slowly muttering, We'll
-I'll--be--heap-much--what-ye-
may-callee -alle-same-if 1 know
what that charming creature is driv-
ing at
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
A Negro in the Beer.

The discovery of a dead negro in one
Of the huge vats OF great London
brewery, while it was undergoing re-
pairs. has created sensation among
beer drinkers, which appears to be by
no means unpleasant. to judge from a
correspondent Of the EStGtette, who
writes that In the Strand are to be
met drinkers who speak of the "beer
az negre" with the gusto which a
thoroughbred native of Bordeaux talks
of the "Uirl de la cOmete.n
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Strange Discovery by Divers In Lake
Geneva

A strange discovery is reported from
the Lake of Geneva. A tourist having
lost his trunk, two divers were en-
ployed to search for it. When they
were below water they found what
they supposed to be q village, since
covered by the lake. The statement
led to an Investigation of the spot by
the municipal authorities, who took
measures to ascertain the truth of the
extraordinary account of the divers.
On covering the placid surface Of the
water with oil, these latter were able
to distinguish the plan of town,
streets, squares, and detached houses
marking the bed of the lake. The
ruddy hue which characteriZes them
led the two observers to suppose that
the buildings had been covered with
the famous vermillion cement which
was used by the Celts, Cimbri and the
early Gauls. There are about two
hundred houses arranged over an OBJ
long surface, near the middle of
which is a space more open, supposed
to have been used for public assem-
blages. At the eastern extremity lies
a large square tower, which was ta-
ken for rock. A superficial investi-
CATION seems to indicate that the con-
struction of these buildings dates from
some centuries BEFORE our era. The
Council of Vaud have decided to have
the site of the buildings enclosed by a
jetty stretching from the land. and to
drain off the water, so as to bring to
light what promises to be one Of the
most interesting archaeological diseov-
cries of our day.-LOndOn Telegraph.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

much as the horse goes to the show
because he must do so. We venture
to say that four-fifths of these enter
tainments are to journalists an intol-
erable bore. The press is the victim
of the pubIic's rapacious and unceas-
ing demand without pay. Let US
have the boot on the right leg"
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Hand by all means whittle the chair
with your jack knife. Hi know you
must feel like it-yOu whittle In Ha-
merica. I'm sorry hi 'avent a cock
tail or corpse-reviver to offer you,
but we don't know 'ow to make them
'ere. Do make yourself comfortable
hand don't stand on ceremony"
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Rev. Thomas B. Bott, of Philadel-
phia, is again In trouble. A year ago
scandal checked him In his undue at
tentions upon a lady member of his
flock, and now. within week, he has
been arrested for not providing for his
family. He still dispenses (with) the
gospel from his old pulpit.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

HENGLISH 'OSPITALITY.-"Please
make yourself at 'ome, general"
observed the hespititable British aris-
tocrst to General Grant. "Put your
legs right hup on the table and spit
hon the floor. just as you do in Ha-
merica. Never mind the carpet.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

DR.. TOwuSend's Oxygen
ated Air viii purify tho
blood in One-tAird the
time that any otheS
known remedy can.
Why? Because tOinhale
OXygenated air it goes
direct 10 the Lungs and
passes through the tis-
sues and comes IN dlrecs
contact with the blood
as il IS forced Into the
Lungs by the action of
the heart. AllthebIOOd
IN our veins returns tO
the heart every four
minutes II the blood ia
good, and forced from
the heart 10 the lungs.
and the more Oxygen
You inhale intOthe lungs
tne more yOu purify tho
blood. When Oxygen
comes in contact with
the Impurities I'm the
blood it carbOniZcs and
burns, causing the blood
10 be heated 50 that it
warns every part Of the
body. as 10 goes on its
revolutions through the
system. IF your blood
Is pure yOu cannot DO
We drive Mercu
~ and all Otheri mpuri
ties out Of the blood.
We guarantee to purify
the blood in One-third
the time Of any other
known remedy.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Now there Is Moody and Sankey
revival song book, a Murphy temper
ance song book aud Mrs. Van Colt
revival hymn book. Somehow these
remind us of the striped fellows In the
circuses, who have heretofore had al
most a monopoly of the song book
business.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Richard Grant White says that
heigh-ho, as an expression of weari-
ness, is not authorized, and has moth
ing In 1t. No man, however, who
been out on windy day, will deny
there is good deal in high hose
NOraOich Bulletin.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

The whole movement (strike and
riots) will bring into worse repute
than ever the labor unions of the
country and accomplish nothing in
the way of improving the relations of
the working people with their en-
ploYers.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

My dear Polly, I am surprised at
your taste in wearing another wom-
ans hair on your head,' said Mr..
Jenkins to his wife. My dearest Joe,
l am equally astonished that you per-
sist in wearing another sleeps wool
on your back
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Pater familias s:-"TomoTrow Is the
tutors birthday what can get for a
present?"
Charley (who has been watching
the dogs in the street, :-"Get him a
muzzle, papa he is always biting the
governess on the cheek :"
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

A butcher Of some eminence was
lately in company with several ladies'
at a game of whist, when, having lost
two or three rubbers, one of the ladies'
addressing him, asked "pray sir,
what are the stakes now?" Madam
the best rump 1 cannot sell lowerthan
twenty cents a pound"
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Indecorous remark by the Boston
Bulletin: The principal differen ce
between the dress of lady and gen.
tleman, nowadays, is that the gen.
tleman has two legs to his pants, and
the lady one.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

1t is an established medical fact that
vanilla ice-ceeam causes a relaxation
of the muscles and tenderness of the
heart, while lemonade makes a girl
revengeful.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Stanley Matthews was the other
day looking at an engraving of Moses
being towed In from the pond. and he
remarked. Certainly. they ought to
have put me somewhere moGestly in
the foreground"
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

A Peru girl sat on her lovers hat
and kept him three hours over time.
The next time that young man goes
to see his girl he shouln hang his hat
on a nail instead of holding it in his
Ian.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

"That's the smallest horse I ever
saw said countryman on viewing a
Shetland pony. "Indade now," re-
piled his Irish companion, "but I've
seen one as small as two of him."
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Now is the time to be in the coun-
try, under the trees, tossing your arms
around In the cool breeze, and drop
ping worms down between your neck
and shirt-collar.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Ex-Gov. Moses has been arrested in
South Carolina on the charge of hav-
in issued fraudulent pay certificates
when Speaker of the House in 1872.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

A murderer escaped from the jail st
Somerset, Kentucky, by eloping with
the sheriff7s daughter.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

If those eel-skin dresses were not
made of good material, We should
move right out of town.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
A !

WE GUARANTEE TO
CURE Coughs, Colds, Dip
liberia, Pneumonia, Neu-
ralgia, and nearly all 9th
er severe attacks when ell
other remedies fail.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Why? Because Asthma
IS "a contraction OF the
Bronchial Tubes, caused
by Inflammation and ir-
ritatiOu of the muCus
membrane lining the
Bronchial Tubes. Use
ONygcnated Air as we
will direct and we will
warrant a CURE. We.
have cured cases Of q,
years standiDg,
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Consumption

D Y S PE STA WE
CURE. Liver and Kid
ney complaints are efIec-
tually reached by Oxy-
genated Air.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Can be cured. Why 2
Because we have cured
hundreds Of cases, some
Of them being given
over TO die by al physI-
clans Of other schools Ot
practice. Consumption
is a disease Of the Air
passages. and over two
thirds Of the cases aru
caused by Catarrh. We
guarantee o cure II you
viii cOmein season.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

PIANOS Magnificent, Rran New, $3.50
l 11hNON ( rosewood PianoSaonly SI75, must
NDNANcfbe be sold. Fine Rosewood Upright
OhUANOtP Pianos, little used. cost $500, ORly
SI25. FarlOr organs, = Stops S45, stops only
S75. Nearly new Set Reed IL stops Sub Bass and
Coupler Organ s55. cost over $3.50. Lowest prices
ever offered. Sent on 10 days test trial. You ask
why offer so cheap? Ianswer, Hard Times. 1000
employees must have work. Result of war COM
menced on me by the mOnOpolists. Battle raging.
Particulars free. Address, Daniel Il. Beatty,
Washington, New Jersey. swt
Ok FANCY CARDS all styles with name 10 cts.
LC post paid. ]. b. Hustled, Nassau, RensCO. N. Y.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

Why? For the same
reason rs given above.
The Bronchial Tubes
are simply conductors To
carry air to the Lungs,
hence Inhalation must
go direct 10 the seat Of
the disease, and If you
WillfOllOW our directions
we guarantee 10 CURE
Bronchitis.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

WE MAKE A SPEC
Atty Ortreatlng patients
by Mail. Please write and
describe your symptoms.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
Bronchitis !

ALL PERSONS THAT
read this are invited 20
send for our large and
beautifully illustrated Pa
per, sent free TO any ad-
dress.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23
(Send for our large and beautifully Illustrated pa
per, sent free 10 any address.
DR.. T0WNSEND'S
.OIJgGlatGd Ail!.

Why Because Tnhala-
latiOn is the only way
that the Afr Passages
can be reached, and Ca
tGrrh Is q disease OF the
AIR Passages Ofthe head.
Use this treatmcutasw we
direct. which IS ensy and
pleasant, and We guar
Gntee a perfect CURE OF
Catarrh.
Nebraska advertiser., 1877-08-23

A Pilatka, Florida, preacher was
driven out of his pulpit recently, dur
ing sermon, by mosquitoes.
, 1877-06-30

We are in receipt OF letter from Iowa.
making enquiries sabout our Territory, also
from almost every State in the,Union. If
we answer them all we shall have tn keep
II clerk for that purpose. There is plenty
of land in this, and every county OF the
Territory, to be had by pre-emptyiDg or
homesteading. This land is not prairie
land. 1t has to be cleared or diked.
But when that is done, no prairie land
produces better. There is market for
everything raised. We have little or no
snow, plenty of rain, and no cold wealth
er. Stock, generally does not have to
be fed in winter. We have no hostile
Indians, wild beasts that are trouble
some, grasshoppers, crickets or drOuth.
Game and fish are abundant. Hay, grain,
hops, vegetables and fruits are proftahly
cultivated. Laboring men get from S25
to 800 a menth. Mechanics from 50 80
TO s. per day. Lumber manufacturing
and ship building IS carried on, the for
mer extensively, the latter is increasing
yearly. Good workman and artizans,
can find small water powers and good
openings, in every county, for commenc-
ing business. The inducement for all
kinds of wood work is superior, for We
have the natural woods. unsurpassed by
by any other varieties, growing here
, 1877-06-30
Communication.
Oak Ra1rbOr.

This place is firmly moving forward
on the road OF improvement. A new
feature, which supplies need long felt.
has lately been added here, by +. III.
Marsh, in n splendid stock OF general
merchandise in the stOrc-room connected
with the new warehouse built by the
Oak Harbor Grange.
The Fourth OF July will be celebrated
at this place by IA horse race got up by
the Oak Harbor Jockey Club, and pic.
mic by the people Of the settlement gen
orally, aud Il dance by the young people
in the evening at the Grange Hall.
All we now lack to place us in free
and easy communication with the rest of
the world, is regular steamboat and mail
connections, which will shortly be ef-
trctcd. About 5000 pounds of wool
have already been shipped from this point
this season, probably not less than u
thousand tons of hay will be produced
in this settlement this season; besides
considerable quantities of butter, vrgeta-
blcs fruits, sc. NJ.
June 1G 1877.
, 1877-06-30
frcmain yours truly,
Oak Harbor, June 10.

Rev. Joseph Cook of Boston has failed
to carry water in his orthodox seive.
He has set himself up as the exponent Of
orthodox faith and tried to reconcile it
with science. The result is he has only
succeeded in stirring up the whole or.
thodoX hornets nest and "a in fair way
OF being stung to death by the happy
family of which lie is member.
, 1877-06-30

allow themselves to be brought to lite
and come full handed to The fair OF
course the society will be glnd to see II
hig turn nuD; hut those who come n'
contributors will be douhly and thr.hly
welcome. We hope every citizen OF this
county viii look upon it as duty to
contribute toward making our next and
the Olympia fair II GRAND SUCCESS.
, 1877-06-30
EDITOR NORTHERN STAR :
VE NFVg W.T.
June 16 1877.


DEAR SIR In your issue of June 2d,
your associate has an excellent article on
education, he speaks OF the power ofasso-
citation in our public schools, as well as
in other matters, that united action would
succeed where singly it would fail. 1t
has seemed to me that in this part of the
country we have lacked united action
where our public schools are concerned
The teachers have not met together for
the purpose OF discussing school matters.
The Superintendents have not visited
the schools to see whether the teachers
were complying with the law or not,
earning their wages honestly, or wasting
their time and the scholars to. Conse-
quently anything that promised to rectify
all these things and give US good school
besides, should be hailed with delight
by all friends of education. The call
for a Territorial Teachers Institute, WAS
supposed to cover the groupd, it was to
meet on Wednesday, but in order to be
there 1t was necessary to start from this
place on Saturday, the teachers were
urged to close school and attend, some
did So, but instead of being rewarded,
by having refreshing time, some one
postponed it until the middle of July.
have heard of two reasons lor the
postponement, one was that the com-
mittee to draft school law had not had
time to finish it, as they have had only
one short year to work in probably that
is so, the other was, that if the Seattle
teachers slapped their schools to attend,
the scholars would become demoralized
and the teachers loose control, of course
it is OF no consequence at all, that teach
ers out side of Seattle lost a week, and
thsir expenses of travelling and then
found themselves April fooled in June.
Making the next call for the middle Of
July is very appropriate. Many Super
intendents are farmers and that You
know is the time of year that there is
work to be done on the farm, and then
July is cool month, no hot sun to
weaken the brain, or make it necessary
to strengthen the body with stimulants,
the roads and streets are free from dust,
and travelinga luxury, or was i: warm
spell they were looking for, hopeing it
to have such an enervatipg effect on the
children, that they would not demoralize
themselves or any one else, but let these
conjuctures be right or wrong hope the
meeting will come, ard have good at
tendance, and give us in return a good
school law, but l can very near guess
that some that tried it before will wait
a while.
Ircmain yours truly,
| Oak HnrhOr Junp 10