The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1877-10-11

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KssAusiasiic foa,h 90 aorse car
Jhst saAs oreg ihere i Mars. Uusy m.
Fsihssie D.ires-Is ~ Thea the ether
ese, ! saFPoss. i pas
"a wsslera paper speaks q tramp
wiih a sari q bali jauaiy ar shot, him
Mosl q them g. have = sort q demi.
lohaiy sir abagt tbem. tha,s fact
"A Mistissippi graager Il opposed
e iailfoa8s Ho says hat wheH be
Foes % town they bring him homo 90
qaiek be hasn't time 70 get sober before
be arrives
The misery Of The young man who
courts sparkling. fashionable belle
aad loses her is only erelled BY The
misery a the man who courts her aud
wins her.
Science says thai IL took millions
u years 10 evolve man from the CLAN (;
observation shows that il takes less
than a minute 10 transfer the clam into
man.
Those auburn-haifcd young ladies
with noses suggestive Of cold morning
and who missed Gre during the leap.
year past, now sadly sing, II may be
four years, aud il may be forever,
Some people may talk about bard
aud dull times in Van ZAndt county,
TeTAn, but when man appears on our
streets with good fat beef, Offering 1t
al three cents per pound, we can stand
all such bard times
Its all right to yell at a young
man, Go West but ont this way a
railroad conductor who can't drop a
penbiless passenger exactly in the cen.
ter Of six mile swamp on a dark
night won't hold his place over four
trips
Fellow trabcllers. said a colored
preacher, Ct had been eAtin' dried ap.
pies for a week, and then took TO
drinkin' for mont, couldn't feel more
swclled up dan l am dis mint wild
pride aud vanity at seein' such full
tendance har dis eyenin'.
AT duel the parties discharged
their pistols without effect. whercupon
one Of the seconds interierred aud pro.
posed that the combatants should shake
hands To this the other second oh.
iected as unnecessary, for said he,
their hands have been shaking the last
half hour.
When Boston girl "sets" at her
husband, she says, Base tyrant, shall
leave thee, and fly TO my parental
home When Chicago girl becomes
similarly affected. she simply remarks,
Old man, I'm going TO git away; and
If You don't like il, just climb up on
your eyebrows and see if you can stop
mel
"A little boy guilty of some mis-
conduct, upon being asked why he
could be so naughty, replied that he
thought he was not doing anything
wrong. That's no excuse. said his
mother thinking doesn't help the mat
ter. Well. mamma, said he. what's the
use Of having a thinker, II you can't
think
"A Scotch clergyman, who was a
hard laborcr on his glebe. and when oc.
cupied in cultivating il, dressed in a
very sIoyenly manner. was one day en-
gagged 10 a potato field. when be was
surprised by the very rapid approach
Of his patron in an open carriage, with
some ladies he was TO meet at dinner
10 the evening, Unable to escape in
time. he drew bis bonnet over bis face
extended his arms covered with his tat
tered Jacket, and passed himself Of as
a scareorow.
AT public dinner ia the country
farmer, while relating something to
the company about two Chinese wo.
men. said. declare they were the ug
licst women have seen anywhere.
There happened 10 be two maiden Ia.
dies present Of no remarkable beauty,
The farmer, who was little misty, be.
gan 70 think hc had made mess Of il
aud that they would imagine he was
abiding TO them so, to put matter:
straight as be thought, he added, the
present company excepted. Roars o.
laughter ensued, and in few minutes
both farmer and ladies had vanished.
I'm Carlsbad, Bohemia, is restau
rant keeper who, when be fnds any
distinguished person dining at bis es
Establishment, presents himself ia dress
coat with many bows, aud asks ID,
honor 81 an autograph. Rothschild
the banker. signed himself simply r
Dc Paris. Oppeuheim, rich banker 0
Cologne. was subsequently appealed /,
he locked al the list aud asked wht
II AZ par5n usnN That s.fd tha yas