The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1877-12-27
SMALL CHANGE.

y
One day, "tell me, what IL a ringl"
"a ring" said the parent, admiring,
Lets see well, it's not square tang
The money and hair of fool are
soon parted in the middle.
/ Books most influenced by hard
times are pocket books.
! How is a tramp to live if nobody
will give him workY
The most patient objects in the
shape of humanity--Statutes.
You know mock modesty as You
do mock turtle-from it's being the
produce OF a calfs head.
If you want to hear a man tell a
well-developed, full grown lie you
just poke your head in store door
and ask change for five dollar bill.
What is bat9 asks a contempo-
rary. As far as our education ex-
tends, a bat is q thing to encourage
a cat to get off back fence, and is
composed of half a brick.
The most difficult thing is 20
know ones self; the most easy, to
give counsels to another; and the
most delightful, to obtain the COM
pletion of our desires.
If you hear a man say that life is
but a dream, tread on his favorite
corn and wake him up. 1t will
probably convince him that life is
real.
A drunken legislator said that he
was ''self-made man." "That
fact" said Horace Greeley, "relieves
the Almighty of great RESPONSE
bility.
A sailor who jumed overheard TO
save another, was asked if he was
fit to die. l could not be more ft,"
he replied, "by declining to do my
duty"
Don't moralize to a man who is
on his back. Help him up, set him
firmly on his feet and then give him
advice and means. The means by
all means.
A reflective genius says it takes
something more TO make a good
Christian than hanging around the
church doors, watching the pull
backs as they pass in and out.
A lot of Frenchmen, Prussians
and Englishmen chiselled their
names on an ancient Egyptian tomb,
and over them all an indignant sa-
want has engraved, "a list of fools"
The cost of dying in North Caro-
lima is summed up at low figures:
Three cantalopes and half bushel
of peaches, twenty cents; one visit
from doctor, So; pine coffin, 80;
total, $500.
Whoever sincerely endeayors to
do all the good he can, will prob
ably do much more than he imag-
ines, or will ever know TO the day
of Judgment, when the secrets of all
hearts shall be made manifest.
Honor and justice, reason and
equity, go a great way in procuring
prosperity to those who use them (;
and, in case of failure, they secure
the best retreat and the most hon
orable consolation.
Science, with all its accuracy and
precision IN many directions, has
never been able TO make out to the
satisfaction of thinking minds why
a servant girl always has moro
cousins than any other living crea-
ture.
A correspondent writes: ado you
think it is wicked to smoker" Oh,
dreadfully, awfully, sinfully wicked
Send your cigars TO this Office and
let us burn them up for you, while
you swear Off and reform before 1t
is too late.
"Why do you attack meY said a
brilliant glow worm to a vile little
insect as ugly as IL was venomous.
because you shine so brilliantly"
This reply is the explanation Of a
great many dislikes and rancorous
feelings.
The Cincinnati Brsakfast Table
says: Sometimes 1t amt good poll
cy to try to do much with limited
capital, as a genteel-looking mendi-
cant thought the other day, when
he went into the Gibson House bar
bershop aud got shaved, hair cut,
whiskers died and-kicked clear
across the street for three cents.
Don't depend upon reading bor-
rowed papers next year 10 get your
information, but be man and send
forward and get one of your own.
Newspaper borrowing is not down
right stealing, but IL it is kept up
long enough it will run into that
thing. Beware OF newspaper bor-
rowing.
A wife or nearly ten years, hay
ing given her servant holiday, was
attending 20 culinary matters her
self, and hearing her husband com
ing into the kitchen, thought she
would surprise him as soon as be
entered the door, by throwing her
hands over his eyes and imprinting
kiss on his brow, as in days Of
the honeymoon. The husband re-
turned the salute with interest, and
asked, as he disengaged her hands:
MARY, darling, where Is your mis-
tressY" The wife discharged "Mary,
darling" the next day, and adopted