The Lake County star. [volume] (Chase, Mich.) 1873-current, 1877-07-26


NY sERIEHD. col. RA0KUs.
II WIKI you kssw; Colonel Backas. 1
think he would amuse y9n, For ne
amuses me Immensely. Tile Colonel
belongs 10 one at the best families, and
was once Q hapdsome map, Wheq he
Is we'll and sntgly dressed he thinks
he's hApdeome now; but thtre's no de-
nSing it--he'g TAT. He gets short Of
breath end very FED In the face going
up-stairs. Thu eovppleace pf bis ~ q
|, great trouble 70 him, lie, S9ysei It ts
SRd AZ rs I, S ssSSda ~ isl T.
~ @s3 p4tied III e M |. f q 4 psstds,
s sna "a cunt cunt on his mothers . , ere fAt
He can't eat oatmeal or p6tstoss,a or
bread because these make starch, and
cfSS SSfss Us l %sb . 6s5s
nee w0u!S sss% , e 81 wno% e
these breezes, these trees, this bea4ti,
full world, this broad sky, these Bird :
thrill me and iii me with delight. i
am free from the conventionalities Of
the tawn; I ann one with nature.
What the Colonel really does say rs:
'"Confound the old fulling-milil a.
man might as well ride the crest of an
earthquake, but I'm bound to get rid
Of this fiesh II pounding will do IT,"
But It don't do It and won't do It.
IT a e~rcx.ye IN os,far lov.A uuo ~ nfY rnOro
and more buttons when he puts on his
boots and talks more and more about
his tailor crimping his clothes. >
! Now, suppose I must tell you what
the real trouble is with the Colonel,
though he never would confess Il. The
Colonel drinks. And what do you
suppose the Colonel drinks for? You
can't make him believe that 1t has
anything to do with getting stout. I'm
going to tell you. by and by, what i
think of II: but, first, i must tell you
about the Colonel's last experiment.
One night he came home to supper
radiant. He had found his cure.
HAS itcome? 2" inquired he OF Mrs..
Backus.
.:Has what come 2" she asked. -
"Why, my-my lift-my machine
my lifting machfne." he responded.
rSomething has come, y replied Mrs.
Backus, something heavy, and I have
had 1t sent into the basement ,l,.,.,s
= "'Just the place for It, said1 the Col
onel. Snow, you see, l'm going to get
rid. Of this fat,r-and down-stairs he
went. s,i.f~, bftFef js..a, -, = lll.As
! When he returned, he had broken
off q suspender button, and looked
Tssther limp and solemn. But, when
he rose from his, dinner that day, he
declared that he had not felt 90 well In
year. / About. Ave days after that,
while sitting quietly at the dinner
table, he suddenly pushed back his
chair and slapped his hand in . sharp,
vexed way upon his knee. I'D, - ,
a.ConfOund It, I haven't thought of
my lift cure for five days. .itgs 80
|. And 90 It happened every day.. He
was 50 eager to get at bis. dinner and
his wine, when he returned from his
ofIlce,' that he forgot his. lifting ma
chine. Meantime he grew stouter and
stOuter. fif-i sGf ~ - .T.{ lYg .s.lg -
~ And now, boys, I come to my point.
Why did he forget the lifting machine,
which he had purchased as q remedy?
Simply because he didn't like the ift-
ing machine, and did like liquor. That
Is all, there IL about It Ia any similar
case. Men may say what they choose
outliquor being good fOrthem. They
may tell you that they cannot make a
dinner without wine that water dOesnot
agree with them. that they take 1t as a
remedy for some form Of disease, but.
you will notice that 1t Is the one kind
of a medicine that an habitual patient
never forgets to take. You never see a
man who takes wine with his dinner,
showing violently back from the table,
alapping his knee aud exclaiming
"ThereI confound it. I forgot to take
my winei". People forget rhubarb,
castor oil, sulphur, iron, myrrh-mix-
ture, lifting-machines, quinine, Peru
Wan bark quassia, squills, and thor
wine, particularly when they have
There must be something In it that
specifically stimulates the memoryI
Don,t Won sppnose that Col. Raclus
knows HAT n Is the iiuuor he drinks
,uhich mskes him fat And keensr him
soS Yes do does Know r. and n is
simplv ridiculous for him to deny Il.
He knows that AZ he were to stop
drip hing he would be- OBLIGED to send
ali his clothes to his tailor to be taken
in. But he iiphts his own knowledge.
He tries to deceive the peopIe around
him. and deceives himself. llri-
$500, p.o.,. !. . s,.va = .rh.. ..
-, C In, ID ahn,+ nS Ha "a soo "
mi SaSsn ,unS KS, Hn %ats s,svar Ana All No.
Icnow, wv no p" -, =. - - a. ~ =
ss Tou i1 aH h ~n mape All sorts ~ W. az
"e' v ..i.,es 80 49,. q.
S JuSes a. arn sisvss Thev sre nom ~.
u en,nms tSS. ~ ~ Ioes them No yooS hut
thew I like Il And sixtv tbonsand az
them every wear lie down In America.
| in the graves of drunkards. These
poor dead men have all been slaves of
| the same sort as Colonel Backus. It
seems a pity that, eur good-natured
friend the Colonel. should become one
| 81 their number. but that IL lust what
| he is going to become, I suppose. He
h.a an onrotifA that will crovr Nth