The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1877-06-02

lOlergyman's Wife in the Christian Unioa.I
I th,,l- I akn,,tl foa1 .aasa~ about =,


half and three years--if | could &C
count for their wickedness upon general
principles. But how on earth such ances-
tries as theirs-two long rows of unspot-
ted deacons and ministers-could ever
produce such little imps is quite beyond
me. All the wild oats that have been
smothered under white ties for couple
of centuries have cropped out in my two
boys, and ali l have to say is, It's very
hard on me. | have borne with them
until patience is no longer virtue; and
now | bring them before the religious
public for discipline. Solomon says,
"Spare the rod and spoil the child" but
he was wise old gentleman not to COM
nit himself any further. What would
he have ns do II, after an unsparing use
of the rod, the child is still spelled
From the time my small men step out of
their respective cribs in the morning till
they tumble into them at night our
creature complaints" One eternal howl,
rising and falling, changing from sad to
gay, from mad to repentant, but never
dying away till the little eyes are closed
and the fat fists punched into the pillow
for the night.
We always have morning papers in the
sitting room. There. in front of the
blazing fire, are two great easy chairs,
dubbed respectfully, the big bears
chair" and middle-sized bears chair"
Then there are crickets for the little
BEARS" After we have had our break
fast, and the two youngsters have eaten
a miraculous quantity of oatmeal, they
know that the next thing on the pro-
gramme is to go into the sitting room
and seat ourselves for prayers" So
they start pell nell, trip over one another,
and sprawl headlong, one on top of the
other, through the doorway. The upper
one pounds the under one, and the under
ne roars and bowls. Then we sit dowon,
in which process the baby is always sure
to come short of his cricket, and sit
down little on one side, with thump
and roar. Then each must have some
sort of book for Bible. Baby prefers
Keble's Christian Year." because ithas
a red cover, whilst Charles has a leaning
to ovid Sports in the far West"
because now and again he can steal
peep at the bloodthirsty engravings.
We are about to commence. Pater-
familias looks solemn. Charles" he
says, !" if you are not good boy, papa
will have to punish you after prayers. "
Charles looks awe-struck and the baby's
lip quivers. We all feel solemn enough
to commence. We have read dozen
verses and the children sit motionless.
fall TO thinking whata beautiful thingit
is to have the little ones worship with
us. Their memories may treasure up
words that are empty now, but in after
years may be full Of meaning. We read
a few more verses. Bless me- The
crickets and their owners have disap-
peared. They have hitched" along
noiselessly and are punching one another
behind the desk. A few more verses and
they crawl around behind my chair, tan
DUN fashion. Children" say, in an
agonized Whisper" 60 back don't you
remember what papa said ?" But they
are deaf to remonstrance, and the next
thing they do is to get the tongs and
poker and beat the loudest kind of
reveille on the coal scuttle. "Children ~
shout, "go back to your seats thi
minute" They 90, and we all kneel
down for the prayer. They are worse
than ever. Baby turns Methodist, and
his responses come near drowning the
prayer. Charlie finds pin, and is about
to stick it into baby's leg when | restrain
him. Then they both stand upon their
crickets and make simultaneous dive
for the depths of my easy chair, nearly
knocking me into the fire. Next they
pull off their fathers slippers, and are
about to commit assault and battery on
him. Just then he says, "Our Father
which art in Heaven" They recognize
LndU. phrase As Vic ucSinhinS Va Dhc
end" and the transformation is wonder
full. Little heads are bent and hands
folded decorously, and in that attitude
they remain for full minute after we
are on our feet, as proof positive that
they have been "good." We hold
family council as to the degree of badness
that merits whipping, and end with
giving them solemn lecture and free
pardon.
We entertained minister, not long
since, for week. Ofcourse he conducted
prayers, and said, apologetically, that
| hoped the children did not disturb
him. Poor mani Like George W., he
could not tell lie. So he blushed and
said they did distract him little, but
he hoped he should be able not to
notice it.
Cannot any one who reads this tale of
woe suggest remedy? | appeal to
those who have no children, their
theories are always best, to tell me what
to do.
THERE is said to be a paper church
ootualIu aviatino near Rarlin which can