West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1877-12-08
! FROM UNION DISTRICT
UNION DISTRICT, Dec. 8.

Hight down the ~ eat cycle OF time
and we are found at the scratch
again. But where, Oh where, shall
we look :or iocaIs2 We've mad no
riots, no coon hunts, no weddings.
but deal of sparkling" no spelling
schoos, no package humbuggers, no
dire calsmiues, earthqu ,kes. floods.
free, nor "sich," no fights. Well,
let's see, no hghts, no that wont DO,
for tbs said there was a Iced Q" war
Ia "Slusswick" the other day. A
little tempest, not IN tes-po bur
In one of our rural sub-dlstIic
schools. The principal oomoatants
were the young master aud res
genuine live American gal I Is
currently reported that the young
master actually came out second best,
and has been awarded second bon
ors by the entire school. Of the
cause or source OF the trouble which
eliminated in trial of muscu ar
power, We are not advised. We
have read the Noble deeds OF Anne,
lean Women but never read Of
woman lvalloping school master.
Hoorah for the gals of "Ameriky."
Isaac, one OF our good natured, ciev-
er old 6aches says, POUNDS, bow thai
gal could trot fellow round the
rosy hush. Well wager our last
nickle that yoc'lI never catch Isaac
playing schooImaster with the gals.
Never.
Abe still insists that something
is surely wrong in Denmark. The
loss OF another good fat hen, makes
him declare that things look mighty
Hayes-y and suspicious around and
about his hen-roost. His tender
charge of which We spoke in pre-
vious letter is source of great trou
Bile and has evidently engaged hls
serious attention OF late 1t is be-
lieved that be has reso we'd to pro
cure a step-mother by Christmas for
his little family. That's good res
olution Abrsm, We say execute II
init speed.
AS it has been a long time since
your readers heard OF uncle Jake,
we, therefore propose to pay eur
respects to him as we pass along
Well, uncle Jake as eveIy boly
calls him, Is buxom lad OF seventy
six summers and a correst ondinp
number of winters, and until recent
ly a clerk III the store of D. M. Wot-
ring & Co. Tue boys say that uncle
Jake would marry If some lady with
nice little home and few hun
dred dollars in cash, "hard money !"
would only propose Uncle Jake
being an old time Democrat, "a OF
course hard money man. Now
here's chance for some lady who
can tll the measure. Uucie Jake
declares that people are not as they
used to be in the olden time. Al
things have changed, but him alone.
He is often heard to lOkistle some ia
vorlte piece as boys are wont to DO
He sometimes whistles in plaint,ve
tone, words like these,
When young and IN my prime,
With the gals could SHINE,
But now when / am old and tough
The gale, the gals keep scarce
enough.
The Georges Of our land are pros
porous. There are SO many OF them
that we think they should be nun
bered like the Daniels at the mar
risge feast. Aud by the way one
George came near committing "ac-
cidental' suicide the other week by
falling from the roof Of pig-sty. l.
occarred on Thursday, aud he had
been to see his Mary Ann" The
night previous, further particulars
are unne ;esssry.
Then there is George Levi, poor
fellow It's SAID that he too vii,
soon leave his present state Clerk
Martin is expected to supply him
With a dollars worth Of passport.
Then again there is that other
George, who may be heard TO sing,
The gal that left me bsh ud,
Soc 10 70 charming and 50 gay,
The gal that left me behind.
During several dsys Of lsst week
old 5oTeas burst upon US with ali The
fury Of q mid-winter storm, and =
couple inches Of the beautiful snow
covers the ground. But the storm
has sbated and we now enjoy better
weather.
Old town, for once, boasts a plank
side walk.