Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1877-04-12
Anmuruus department.
EVERY NIGHT /?

According to the Bowling Green. (Ky)
Paragraph, member of the City Council of
that town, upon returning home rather late
one evening last week, was regaled by his
good lady with an animated address in some
thing like this style:
Every night Here it is half-past one
o'clock! It's wonder you came home at
all What-do-you-think-a-wom woman is
made for9 I do believe if robber was to
come and carry me of, you wouldn't care
One cent. What is it you sayS "City
Council business must be attended tor City
Council business? How do know you 60 to
the City Councils Does the City Council
meet every night They don't meet but
once in-New York. But, suppose, Bow
Ling Green is a more important place.
Oh! yes-out every night. Twelve o'clock
one o'clock-two o'clock. Here | stay with
the children, all alone-lying awake half Of
the night waiting for you. Couldn't come
home any sooner? Of course you couldn't, if
you didn't want to- But know something
you think don't, but do; that do.
wish I didn't. Where were you Monday
night3 Tell me that The Marshal told me
the City Council didn't meet that night Now
what have you got to sayf couldn't get
quorumw Well, if you couldn't why didn't
you come home? Out every night-hunt-
iag-for-a-quorum. Bet, you wouldn't
hunt me this late if I was missing Where
were you Thursday night and Friday night?
There was show in town, wasn't there7 DO
you always put on your best vest and clean
shirt to 20 to the Councill What did you buy
that bottle of hair oil for and hide it2 "Oil
for your hone," indeed Who every heard of
hair oil for whetstonef So you think |
didn't see you in the other room, brushing
and greasing your hair, and looking in the
glass at your pretty self? "A man ought to
be decentw He ought, ought he2 Yes, in
deed, decent man ought to be /; a decent man
will stay at home with his wife sometimes, and
not be out every night. How comes it that
the City Council didn't meet but twice a
month last year? Trying to work it out of
debit" Yes, that's probable laugh
ing and Joking and smoking and swapping
lies will work debt of, won't it? Now-I-
Observation-Disclosures
going-to-keep-this ight-busi-
ness? Yes, want to know Out every
night. City Council, Freemasons, Red Men,
Odd Fellows, shows, hair oil-and it's brush
and brush until you've nearly worn out the
brush and your head too. What is it you
say? ut helps your business to keep up your
social relationsp All indeed. You've got
relations here at home, sir They need keep
ing up some, I think. What did you say
about catching it" the other night at eu-
chre party? "Fellers, it's twelve o'clock, but
let's play while longer; we won't catch it
any worse when we get home" A pretty
speech for decent man! "Catch it!
Well, I intend you shall catch it-a little.
What's that you sayi "IfI wouldn't fret you
so you would stay at home morew Well,
sir, do you stay at home few nights and try
it. Perhaps the fretting would stop: Out
every night because l fret you so. What's
that sir2 "You know ladies who amt al
ways scolding their husbands!' You do do
you? How come you to know them? What
business had you to know them? What right
have you to know whether other women fret
or not? That's always the way. You men
think that all the other women are saints but
your wives. Oh yes-saints, s'a-i-n.t's. I'll
have you to know, sir, that there isn't a wo-
man in this town that's any more of saint
than I am. I know them all, sir-a heap
better than you do. You see the sugar and
honey side of them, and they-only-see-
-honey-.and-.su sugar--side- -.of--you.
Nov, sir, just want you to know that if you
don't stay at home more than you do, I'll
leave these children to get burnt up, and I'll
90 out every night. When poor woman
gets desperate, why, sir, she is-desperste,
that's ALL"