The Morristown gazette. [volume] (Morristown, Tenn.) 1867-1920, 1877-09-26
The Devil Gets Mad.

Ihe Devil Gets MAD
BY R. E. BEL, Q. z.-(quite zeaLous1 .
One day not long since the devi
folded up his tail. rubbed the
wrinkles out of his horns and sat
down to med itate, and soon he got
to nodding; so while he sit there
bobbing up and down we will de-
cribe him. Now, we wish everybod Y
TO understand that the following de-
scription is patented at the house
where they make EN-. and anybody
infringing on our rights will be pro.
secuted TO the utmost extent of. the
law, Some people begin at the head
to describe. therefore we'll begin at
the tail end. His tail is just twenty
one feet, three inches long. with q
few barley corns thrown in f1F good
measure this includes tip some
thing like the head OF an Indian
arrow. used to reach over walls. aud
TO thrash the yonng devils. His
body is hairy, the hair being blue
with few streaks Of gray. for he is
getting kinder aged. His head is
about the size ola piece Of chalk.
with an eye on every side; the eye
in front is dark green, the rear one
is light mud. the one on the east
is brindle and the western eye is
kinder open and shutish. His ears
~ a r.
make room for his horns. His horns |
turned up at the end like a cows,
and were sort of rusty and needed
oiling. In his hand he carried a
toasting- fork. His feet had claws
like jay-bird, or ravenhawk There
he was, and nOw-"Oh Dutch Jen-
ny-put-the-kettle-on - came from
some where near.
Whats all that now?' said old
B. Q. Z. Bub, starting up.
'.Ben Butler throwed n spark in
my eye" whined a voice.
Come here T. Numbered old Bnb.
Two puny devils came trembling
up.
"Ben Butler, what did you t>row
that spark in John Sherman's eye
for?"
II didn't go to do it," whinsd
Ben; II was a stirrin' up that fur
lace for Joe Bradley an John came
ioolin' round, an the spark jes
LEVIED"
"Well, you GO ring the bell, I'm
5oing to reconstruct this place
The bell rang. all hell assembled
nd the roll called. '
''What have You been at Tom i
'atim?'' {
well. sir, l went up North, got '
oe Bradley on our side. put our (
IAN Hayes in, created a great howl, 1
ut they wouldn't fight; the South t
Tas ready, the North wasn't. so nary t
ght. L then fooled around awhile, q
OF up big strike up North, saw h
leath fOolin' round. knew it was all
ight, SO I left"
You have done we'll. Did you
ell Death that Bringham Young's .
ell was ready?"
Eyes sir, he said he would attend y
who is in Europe now?" y
Destruction. sir '
"All right, you 60 back TO the u d
i. and get my son lIaye. TO take
rip Sonth; shut Morton's IN 1uth =
while; send Bradley up iii the v
and let the South alone. c
- a
"Here, sir! where 10 your re.
ort? p
"Well, got man to shoot his z
life; got s girl t. kill herself; got
ONE soldiers to skin three women. ?
nd" 7
"Well. well, that is common. Any c
hing new?" s
No SIR" e
"Call Devas-Tatioa.-oh! he i. n
ere. Well?" e
81 have been doing my usual k
ork in burning. &C. p
"All right, now I want cell z
and kept hot for Joe d
radley, Blaine, Morton and KeI- d
g and fix up one tOn times heated d
'r Beast Butler. Def-A Nation 60 &
bout your usual work. See who :"
lat is at the door y
''Bringham Young, cir" said John
herman. Jr.
Show him in.-Well Bringham.
couldn't wait for yon any longer.
ow did you leave your wives? 2" =
"All bowling. Ii you had waited
few days longer | would have had
lie fourth generation OF them ON our
de. but Death said you were in a
airy, 50 | am here
"'Tis WE'LL Come | will show =
ou your ROOM !
Then we saw q pile or groans. A.
Is of shreaks, several weeps and = =
carload OF mourns, SO we took the 81
ain and left, but rest assured that tn
u is reconstructed
Recent heavy rains in Putnam and