Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-03-23
A KINDRED TIE.

She was lame woman. She limped and
she carried cane, and it was natural to infer
that she was lame. She entered the Norris
town depot to wait for train, and was closely
followed by lame man. He had stiff knee,
and he also carried a cane. Two lame per-
sons are no great sight in this big city. Lame
men and women limp their lame way up and
down every day, and few people ever remark
them.
The lame woman took seat, and after a
little while shs was Joined by the lame men.
He wore bright smile, and, as he dropped
down, he cheerfully remarked:
"Quite coincidence.
She made no reply. She was ugly-looking,
but she looked him over, and made up her
mind that she would go and hang herself if
she looked as homely as he did.
81 am lame and you are lame" continued
the man.
"Who are you talking to, sir ?" she de-
manded, giving him contemptuous look.
MADAM, there must be kindred tie be-
tween u.s." he softly replied. 81 am lame in
the left leg-you are lame in the left leg"
care you addressing me% she exclaimed,
flushing very red. :.
II am, madam; say there must be kin
dred tie between US.
"There's no such thing, sir, and 1 don't
want you to speak to me again" she said.
"I am lame and you are lame," he went on.
"Rheumatism got into my knee joint, and
spoiled one of the best legs in the State. Was
it rheumatism in the case Of your leg, mad
amp
"You drunken loafer, you! How dare you
talk to me?" she gasped.
"I can furnish the best kind of references as
to my character" he replied, "and suppose
you can. But doesn't it strike you as curl
Gus coincidence that we are both lame in the
legs, both in the city at once, both waiting to
20 home, both so ugly looking that we can't
get married."
"You-you p she choked.
81 am fifty years old, and I dye my hair"
he coolly continued, "and you are about the
same age, and I observe that you dye yer
hair; 1 wouldn't 60 rod to see a circus pro,
cession, and I judge you wouldn't: l love
onions, and I should say you did. love-"
81 will have you arrested" she yelled
"I'll have you jailed in two minutes p
GAS I was going to remark, madam, l
love-"
"G'way, g'way" she shrieked, clutching
her cane.
"Nevertheless I am convinced that there is
a kindred tie, madam. Two persons lame in
their left legs must"
She whacked him vigorously with the cane
and rushed off to another seat, while gen.
tleman came over to the lame man and told
him he would get into trouble if he didn't
look out.
"I'm through" quietly replied the lame
man. "I thought there was kindred tie
but there isn't. I'll never kindred tie any
living female who is so stuck up that she
won't listen to philosophy. She can take hel
old lame leg and 90 home"
And he sat down and read an almanac fol
1876.
ARrLEss G1RL.-Sweet, gushing, artless
girl. She had just come home. She went
away year ago last September; went te
England first; spent the winter in Italy
sauntered through Germany in the spring
came back to America and triAed away tht
summer at Saratoga, Long Branch and tht
White Mountains. Previous to this trip sht
had been away to school five years, and wher
she Jumped out of the car into her father
arms, she said, impulsively, 20! paw-paw
deah paw, they's no place like homer Ane
"paw's" face was study, as he replied
"Well, no; reckon not; must be quite nov
city to ye."
MORE BR1BERY.-The other day, when {
Detroit woman was splitting wood, she hit he
knee with the axe-handle, and mashed
bone. Her husband agreed to i've her fiv'
dollars to tell the doctor that she fell dow1
stairs, but the surgeon was wise man. H'
said that the knee had been injured by kick
and the husband had to say that the axe-han
die did it, and add: "We had lots of spill
wood on hand, but she was using the axe as 6
guard against consumption"
Poor PErERs.-Said his honor, "Mr. Pc
ters, why don't you sit down, sir?" 81 don
sit down any more, sir" "But you must:
81 can't, sir" "Why can't you" Well
sir, she said we couldn't both sit in one chair
and tried to demonstrate that we could, anc
she picked me up and settled me on top of s