The Lake County star. [volume] (Chase, Mich.) 1873-current, 1876-03-16
TRUTHS AND TRIPLES.

WHEN are eyes not eyes? When the
wind makes them water.
TIE extreme height of misery is a
small boy with new pair of rubber
boots, and no mud or slush to reach.
THERE is funny bill pending before
the Iowa Legislature which requires that
Jurors shall be persons of "good judg-
ment."
A YOUNG lady of seven summers,
when chided by her parent for jumping
over fence, wanted to know if this was
not leap year.
IT was Talleyrand who said that one
must have loved a woman of genius in
order to comprehend what happiness
there is in loving fool.
A TRAVELLING printer says that one of
the Omaha editors writes his editorials
on brown paper with an old dinner fork
dipped in cranberry sauce.
Go to Texas, young man, says Ken
lucky paper. The sooner you 60 the
sooner you'll get back and settle down
contented in your good old native State.
The desire of power in excess caused
angels to fall /; the desire of knowledge
in excess caused man to fall but charity
is no excess, neither can man nor angels
come into danger by it.
WHAT comfort dull, but kindly per-
son is, to be sure, at times! A ground
glass shade over a gas lamp does not
bring more solace to our dazzled eyes
than such one to our minds.
RHYMED RIDDLE.
"pm going to blank" with falling breath,
The fallen gladiator said:
One gasp-the hero-soul has fled.
'lI'm going to blank" the sch00l-boy cried
Two sugared sweets his hands display
Like snOw-fakes in the ocean-tide
They vanish, melted both away.
Tell with one verb, or I'll tell you,
What each was just about to do.
%. w. Holmes in Fair Words
"Succumb" the gladiator groans,
And breathes away his life with means;
"Suck 'em," the schoolboy cries In glee-
-Bostoa advertiser.
FORWARD and loquacious youth: by
Jove, you know-upon my word, now
if / were to see ghost, you know,
would be a chattering idiot the rest OF
my life" Ingenious maiden: "Haven't
you seen ghost?"
BAD luck is simply man with his
hands in his pockets and his pipe in his
mouth, looking on to see how 1t will
come on. Good luck is man of pluck
with his sleeves rolled up and working
to make it come out right.
NORWICH Bulletin A woman called
at the registers Office yesterday, asking
fer marriage license, got it and paid
for it. 1t is felt that this will establish
precedent that will oblige most of our
best young men to take to the woods.
In order to excite the ambition of the
young ladies in her audience, a lady lee
turer on female suffrage in Maine the
other day remarked that If women had
political influence chewing gum would
be put on the free list and kept there
forever.
You didn't laugh at my stupidity be.
fore we were married; you always said
I was a duck of lover" grumbled a
complaining husband. eyes, that's
So" replied the wife, "and duck OF a
lover is almost sure to make goose OF
husband"
THE time for man to stand firmly by
Jobs example is when he washes his face
with home made soap and begins to paw
around over the chairs with his eyes
shut, inquiring for towel, quick, and
is told that the towel is in the drawer,
but the keys are lost.
"WHAr do you think of the present
jury system ?" inquired man of an old
Chicago ex,judge, the other evening.
"Think ?" echoed the old man in dis
gust. "Why, l think it is getting SO
that if man should plead guilty OF
murder, and try to get hung, the jury
would, somehow or other, manage to
acquit him."