The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1876-03-24
DANE PATRIOTISM.
A PROPOSED LADY WASHINGTON TEA PARTY

i They were going Gays tho Danbury
-ffiss) 10 get up Lady Washington tea.
pa IL Cor The benefit Of .beir society. Il
was 10 come of on tie night of The 2ad.
| And of au af,e: uCol p few days before,
seYei ii ladies met at the house Of ore OF
:he number TO perfect The arrange cnents
Ii WIS determined to give grand affair
Gomc;iing especially deso ned 10 transcend
tue ea-psity by rival organization last
year. 80 h:spurpose it became necessary
TO devoe ;he most care sul thought to all
the details, and his WIS done. Ia fac. It
wonit; be difficult 10 fad a moro conscen-
i;ors committee in \ hamlet tIe size of
Danbufy. When all ,he particulars were
| arranged, and TIC various stands and nlinor
Offices assigned 10 :lIc ordinary members OF
| the sOcieiy,-wio were not present, ,-:he
isipoltant question rs to who should take
the leading character was brought ~.
Wi Il a view TO do without The delay aud
feeling of bal'otirS, 1he President kindly
offered 10 do Lady Washington herself.
She said that size feI, 81 was not favorable
selection, bat she was willing to take il. so
| that The, c need lie no discussion or iIl-fcel-
ing. II she ,hougut she had not placed a
ST 1jc!eutly modest estimate upon her quail
| fcaj;ons for the post, Size was presently set
at rest on Chat head. Her offer was receiv-
| ed with silence.
"WIat do you thick ?" she asked. 'G'm
willing to do it,
| 'J."dy Washington never weighed $50
poun,is," ominou>y hinted the thin lady,
with veiy light eyes.
''She had fat enough on her to grease a
e. ietle, wiiCh IS moie'n some folks can
claim" retOried the President, with any
thing bat a dreamy expression to her face.
The tall lady's eyes grew shade darker,
and her lips shaped themselves as if they
wee saying 'hussy," but it is probable
they were not.
Gas our two frierds are so little likely
to agree observed lady whose face
showed that she was about to rnetanor-
phcse herself into r barrel o. prime oil, aud
precipiiate herselfonto the troubled waters,
Il would suggest that l take the charac-
ier.'
| 'Eumphr - calculated the president.
'Is tdc.e any objection to my being
Lady Washing on - said The new party,
fIcihg p b, uptly the President, and empty
ing ont the oil and filing up the barrel inn
mediately with a superior grade Of vinegar.
81 don't know of any, if some one will
demonstrate that Lady Washington had
wart on her Dose,'' replied the President,
with unblemished serenity.
cam 20 he insulted P'' hotly demanded
lie proprietor of the wart.
l..
replied the p esdcpt.
Il s'rose our p esidcnt thinks she would
be perfect Lady Washington" ironically
suggested a weak faced woman who saw
her chances for taking the character de-
iectcdly emerge from the small end Of the
horn.
81 don't know as would be perfect in
that role ~ replied the President, "but, as
therc will be strangers present at the party,
| shouldn't want them 70 think that the
nearest approach Danbury could make TO
the dignity of 'I6 was a tootbless woman
down with the jaundice.' And the head
officer smiled sereUely at The ceiling.
"What do you mean, yon insinuating
t thing?" hoarsely demanded the victim of
the jaundce.
"Keep your mouth shut until you are
spoken to, ther," serenely advised the
President,
ssIn, not to he dictated TO 10y a mountain
of salIow," Missed lhe clromatic delegate,
flouncing out of the room.
al think we'd better get another Presi-
dent before we 60 any farther" said a
sharp-faced woman very much depressed
10y tue outlook for herself.
at isn't hardly tina for you yet" Oh
, served the President, with a signiiican
look at The sharp-faced woman ''we will
f have to arrange for Lady Washington and
George Washington before we will need
, the Hatchet."
| s.The sharp faced lady suatchcd mp her
D muff without The faintest hesitation and
: rushed out doors 20 get her breath. She
4 was immediately followed 10y the proprie-
0 tor of the wart, the thin lady disastrouaIy
connected with the griddle, and the tooth
n less case Of jaundice. This left but the
k President and a little woman who had yet
J. said nothing.
/ Had it occ urred to you that you would
/, like to be Lady Washington ?' asked the
o President. concentrating both Of her eyes
J, on a wen Just under the small woman lei,
IL ear.
d sob, no." gasped the small woman, i'm
g pulsively covering up the excresccnce Will
a her hand.
J. 'sThen / guess Wen adjourn sine die,
i said the Pres idenr, and pulling Oh he1
e gloves, she composediy took her departure
If Aud the tea-party became the fragmen
% Of gloomy memory.
: An Indiana paper has the following
item "a man over towards the ONO nm
u bot ten dollars that he could ride the fly