The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1876-07-20
Items of Interest.

Too many friends hurt q man more
than none at all.
A common rat has one hundred and
fifty bones under his hide.
An old lady of ninety sells newspapers
for living in North Boston.
IL is blessed thing to live in land
of plenty, if you have plenty OF land.
When in doubt which way to take, al
ways step to the right. and avoid the
possibility of getting loft.
Every dog should have his day but
it appears as if the supply Of dogs great
ly outnumbers the days.
A we'll known foriculturist says: 'Not
one violet aeed in a bushel will grow,
Perhaps not, unless he puts some earth
in the bushel.
"You never saw my hands as dirty as
that" said petulant mother to her little
girl. "No, but your ma did, I'll bet,
was the reply.
"Did any of you ever see an ele-
plants skin ?" inquired q teacher OF an
infant class. eyes, sir" "WheroF'
"On an elephant"
A Western paper announces tie Ill
ness of its editor, adding: All good pay
ing subscribers are requested to mention
him in their prayers. The others neeG
not, as the prayers OF the wicked avail
nothing.
Farmers in some sections of California
are making experiments in cultiyatlng
the almond, with every prospect OF ultl,
mate success. Ore man has 2,0uU
almond trees, which are now three years
old, and blossomed this season.
IL make it principle never to lend
money" said good man to q friend,
"but in your case I sacrifice principle
for interest" And when the latter
found he had charged twenty per cent.
discount, he said he thought he did.
"You must cultivate decision of char
acter, and learn to say mo, said
father to his son. Soon aiterward, when
the father told the son to chop wood, the
boy said "no," with an emphasis t1at
showed remembrance of the lesson.
Whitehall Times: A Boston tailor
has had his billheads stamped with a
picture of forget-me-not. This is all
right as long as customers have anemo-
ne. Norristown Herald: Yes, but
these dandy lions are apt to lilac blazes.
Says the Burlington HaDkeye: 1t is
the -blissful serenading season, and these
bright moonlight nights it is not an un-
common spectacle to see young man
strutting down SOME quiet street sand
wiched in between fragment OF
guitar and a whole dog.
The lawyers of Ireland are indignant
at barrisier who advertises in the news
papers. The ancient etiquette of the
legal as of the medical profession is to
starye rather than publish ones bust
ness in the same column with announce
ments of dry goods and groceries.
A fellow was accumulating a fortune
; in Amador, Cal, by robbing the siuice
boxes of miners. Every night for years
he worked faithfully, and had stored
, away nearly enough money to go to his
home in the East and live upon the re
suit of his enterprise, when he unfor
tunately ran against cord that was at
tached to a gun trap, and was instantly
; killed.
A lady who lived near church, wal
sitting near a window listening to thu
crickets which were loudly chirping, thu
music from the choir rehearsal being
. family audible, when o gentleman
3 dropped in familiarly, who had jus
: passed the church aud had the musi
, full in his mind. "What a noise the,
l are making tonight" said he. eyes.
said the lady, Sand it is said they do l
l with their hind legs |"
/, A ship on the broad, boisterous al!
= = open ocean needeth no pilot. But
: : dare not venture alone on the placid no
: som of little river, lest it be wrecke,
= by some hidden rock. Thus it is Wit
I. life. IT'S not in our open, exposed deed
u u that we need the still voice of the silen
/" monitor, but in the small, secret, ever
day acts of life that conscience warns u
to beware OF hidden shoals OF what W
> deem too common to be dangerous.
s A Colorado village lately had its fr:
bananas. One young fellow wanted t
+ know if "they growed on the stick
4 another asked il they were not beans
) and John Chinaman said they must hav
8 grown at the South, as such big bean
o could not grow at the North. A hotf
!, clerk, when told they were good to ea
laughed incredulously, Another bougL
>. one, Just to see bystander eat it, an
!. then trembled with fear lest he had bee
! the cause of poisoning a fellow being.
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