The Portland daily press., 1876-09-29
Gossip and Gleanings.

GOSSlp ana Gloan1ngS.
st. Joseph Herald: "The season is at
hand when the pensive house fly hangs
gloomily to the early morning walls end
wishes to gracious that some one would get
up aud build fire.
Brooklyn Argus:-Thirty-nine years have
elapsed since Queen Victoria first ascended
the throne, and in the mean time bustles
have developed SO prodigiously that she now
has to sit on the extreme edge of it, or
stand.
Tommy is fond of sugar, land asks his moth
er for some to eat with his strawberries. She
refuses. He appears resigned, but adds
gravely: ''You know, mamma, what hap
pened round the corner? There was little
boy, and his mother would not give him any
sugar on his strawberries, and" "And, next
day he fell into well.''
Man has wrung the chickens neck with
impunity for hundreds of years, but Nemesis
has come at last in the form of very old
hen, near Gotham, England. A loaded gun
had been laid on the top Of corn-bin. The
old hen few up, perched upon the trigger,
and brought down farmland who was at
work near. The avenger aimed too high.
an eye was lost, but not life.
Advertisement from Black Hills paper:
cit having been quite generally given out
| that Capt. Ben had departed from this vele
of tears, an opportunity is here offered to
view his remains and witness the urbane
corpse deal out tea, -four, shoulders, bacon,
hams, coffee, sugar, shelf goods, and COM
plete wholesale stock of the finest liqnors and
cigars ever brought into the hills"
A little domestic episode in an elephant
family enlivened Virginia City, New, the 9TH
er day. A baby elephant connected with
circus strayed away, and after exploring the
| town, walked into Chinese gambling house
and began nosing around for opium, to the
CONSERVATION of the celestials. As soon as
| the mother elephant noticed the absence Of
her child, she broke loose, and knowing the
dlssipated habits of the infant made straight
for the gambling den. As the aperture was
too small for her entrance, she began to en-.
large it, to the jeopardy of the edifice.
The Cinnamon, seeing the cause of the
trouble, succeeded in forcing the "baby''
within reach of the parents trunk, and he
was jerked out without ceremony. The ways
of sin, however, had stronger attractions for
the young opium devotee than the virtuous
walls of the circus tent; but the old one was
equal to the emergency, and, colling her
trunk around his middle, lifted him clear
from the ground and marched with him back
to the tent.
Detroit Free Press:-She halted at the
stamp clerks window in the post Office, yes
terday, and asked, "Could procuah posta
cawd heah?" He thought she could. "Twc
thents or one thent p she inquired. One
cent. he told her, and she took one. As she
received it she asked, "Have you pwen and
ink-ah" He had, and he handed them out
She held the pen poised for half minute, as
if trying to remember the name of some deal
friend, and then she touched it to the card
On the fingers of her left hand were nint
rings; on the fingers of her right hand wert
eight more. Nine and eight made seventeen
and none over. She wrote ''H.e-n-r-," and
then the pen gave spatter. "Oh, dweah
my wings bother ma so-ah" she exclaimed
trying to get new rest for her elbow. The,
she went on and finished the ''y'' and begal
"O-g-d-," when the pen spattered agail
and she threw down the card, returned tn
pen, and said, 81 wont wife to him alta awal
for can't wife natural with my wings on Y
Then she rubbed her hands together, shoe
herself and walked out.