Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-05-11
An1uuruus Repartmeut.

A SHORT Corn CRoP-Colonel Finnegan
was Florida planter, wealthy and hospita-
bic. Toward the poor he was always kind,
and even the shiftless he would not turn cold
" away. A man whe had often been the SUBJ
ject of his bounty was named Jake Hartruf.
Jake was squatter in the woods where he
had log cabin, and small clearing. Upon
this land he sometimes raised corn, and with
his gun he captured game. Of the game he
ate the flesh, and the skins he traded for whis-
Ky. Long before the winter was over he
was sure to be out of corn, in which emergen-
cy he would bring his bag to the Colonel for a
supply, which was generally furnished. Once
upon time Jake came with his bag very
early in the season-in fact, winter had just
set in.
"Why, how's this, Jake ?" demanded Fin
negan. Seems to me you are rather early in
your call for corn"
"Well, Colonel, fact is my crop failed this
yer season.
"Failed! How is that! thought it had
been an uncommonly good season for corn"
"Yaas, I s'pose it has, Colonel. But
y'see-I forgot to plant"
AN INCIDENT OF W WEBsrER.-Daniel Web
ster was fond of practical joke, but only
a harmless one, and generally benevolent
one. He had, across the river from his Frank
lin, New Hampshire, farm small piece OF
sandy land, with poor house upon it, in
which very destitute family had been living
without paying rent. Upon one of his visits to
the place, the good woman expressed her anx-
iety about being able to remain, as she expec-
ted to be turned out, and didn't know where
to 90. She hoped Mr.. Webster would not be
hard with her. He heard her through and
told her with great gravity, that he knew it
was hard case for her; he wished to consid-
er her case and didn't wish to be unkind; but
he had great many to provide for. At the
same time putting his hand in his pocket, he
took out five dollar bill, and handed it to
her, saying he was very sorry he could not do
better by her, but if she thought she could af-
ford to stay on the place another year for that,
he should be very glad, and rode off:
JUST LIKE A MANA Danbury man
put pair of nine-dollar shoes in the stove
oven to dry, the other night. There was not
much fire in the stove, so he closed the oven.
door. The next morning he built the fire
without thought Of the shoes, and it was not
until an hour later that it occurred to him.
They we're ruined then. The soles were turn
ed up in a playful manner, and the uppers
somewhat resembled the coast Of Maine. He
didn't say word. Sadly and silently he
was removing them with shovel, when his
wife came in, and saw at glance what had
happened. "Well that's Just like man she
indiscreetly exclaimed. "Why didn't you
have sense enough to look into the oven. be.
fore you started the fire." He hadn't said a
single word of his loss But now he spoke :
Gosh dunn my eyes if I'll ever build another
fire." And he is keeping his word. When
wiW woman learn wisdom?
s9- A country clergyman meetings neigh
Dor who never came to church, although an
old fellow above sixty, reproved him on that
account, and asked, if he ever read at home.
"No," replied the clown, 81 can't read" 81
dare say" said the parson, ''you dont
know who made you" "Not I, in truth"
cried the countryman. A little boy coming
in at the same time, "Who made you, child?'
said the parson. "God, SIR answered the
boy. "Why, look you there" quoth the hon.
est clergyman ''are you not ashamed to hear
child five or six years old tell me who made
him, when you that are so old a man cannot p
"Ah! said the countryman, "it is no wonder
that he should remember he was made 10th.
er day ; it is great while, measter, since l
wur made"