The New Orleans bulletin. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1874-1876, 1876-01-02
ANECDOTES OF SAMUEL FOOTE.

ANECDOTES OF SAMUEL FOOTE.
No man was ever more free from toadyism:
rink was nc shield against his wit, which would
strike as hard at Duke as mental .sWel,.
Foote, here am, ready as usual to swallow
all your goods" said the Duke of Cumber.
land, one night, in the green-room of the
Haymarket. REALLY, your Royal Highness
must have an excellent digestion" replied the
wit. I" for you never bring any up again" A
| Scotch peer, VIGOROUSLY thrifty, served his
wine IN very small glasses, and descanted el.
| oqnently upon its age and excellence.
1t is very little OF IFS age" observed
FoOte. Sometimes this humor amounted to
| insolence; as, Tor instance, after dining at
nobleman's house, not to his satisfaction,
and finding the servants ranged in the hall
when he was departing, he inquired for the
cook and butler, aud upon their stepping for
ward, said to the first, Here's half-a-crown
tor my eating" and to the other, Here's
hve shlilings tor my wine; but, by , 1
never had so bad dinuer for the money in
my life" Dining with Lord Townsend after
duel, he suggested that his lordship might
pave got rid OF his antagonist in a more
deadly way.
"How?" inquired his host "By inviting
aim TO dinner like this, and poisoning
MIN, was the sharp reply. The Duke of Nor
folk, who was rather too fond OF the bottls.
asked MIN IN what new character he should
go TO masquerade. $50 sober" answered
foote Beng taken into Whites one day, a
nob.eman remarked to him that his hand
kerchlef was hanging out of his pocket.
THANK you, my lord" he replied, "thank
You; you know the company better than l
90. A rich contractor was holding forth
upon the instability OF the world. "Can YOU
account for it, sir?" he asked turning to
Foote. "Well, not very clearly" he re-
sponded, "unless we suppose it was built by
contract"
"Why are you forever humming that air"
he asked OF gentleman who had no idea of
time. because it haunts me. 5" "No
wonder, for you are for ever numbering il. +"
Garrick, of whose great fame he was un-
doubtedly envious, was constant butt for
his sarcasms and yet Garrick, whether from
fear or friendship it would be difficult to de-
termine, did him many kindnesses, was al
ways ready to oblige him with money, and
stood firmly by him throughout the jackson
prosecution; which last act of friendship
touched Foote at last with gratitude, for in
one of his letters addressed to Garrick, he
writes "God forevsr bless you! May
nothing but halcyon days and nights crown
the rest of your life is the sincere prayer OF
Samuel Foote.
Garrick's notorious meanness however,
furnished him with many a witticism. At
one OF Foote'S dinner parties an announce
rick's servants. "Oh, let them watt" he
replied to the footman. but be sure YOU
lock up the pan.ry!" One day gentleman,
while conversing with Foote. was speaking OF
Garrick having reflected upon some persons
parsimony, and ended by observing, "Why
did he not take the beam out of his own eve
before attacking the mote in other people's?"
Because" retorted Foote, she is not sure of
selling the timber" "Where on earth can it
be gomez" said Foote, when Garrck dropped
guinea at the Bedford one night, and was
searching tor it in vain. "To the devil,
think, answered the actor irritably "Let
you alone, David, for making guinea go
further than any one else, was the reply.
He could never torego his jest, however
solemn the occasion. He had been to the
funeral OF Holland, the actor, whose father
was baker. 'Poor fellow I" he said in the
Bedford that evening" the tears scarcely dry
upon his cheeks, 81 have been to see him
showed into the family oven." He once said
of an actress, who was remarkably awkward
with her arms, that she kept the Graces at
arms length. But johnson considered that
Foote surpassed every one he had ever heard
in humorous narrative; and that although
Garrick, the great conversationalist of the age,
surpassed him in gayety, delicacy, and ele-
gance, Foote provoked much more laughter.
A gentleman who had conceived prejudice
against him, related to Boswell his first meet
lug with him at dinner.
Having no good opinion of the fellow"
he Said, II was resolved not to be pleased.
went on eating my dinner pretty sullenly,
affecting not to mind him. But the dog was
SO very conical that was obliged to lay down
my knife and fork, throw myself back in nv
chair and laugh it out No, sir he was ire
sistible." This most INSCRIPTIONS of mimics
and satirists was himself exceedingly thin
skinned. When one time Woodward, and at
another Wilkinson, threatened him with
retort in kind, he ran away to Garrick and
Rich, their managers, foaming with passion,
and threatening the most violent retalations
Boswell relates that after hearing him at
dinner table indulge in all kinds of coarse
popularity against j ;hnson, he observed that
he had heard the great photographer say
very good thing of Mr. Foote himself. He
{ Boswe!l had asked him one day if he did
not think Fooe an intidel. 81 do not know
that the fellow is ar infideI," replied John
son; I" but if he be au intidel, he is an infidel
as dog is an in6del that is to say, he has
never thought upon the subject" Boswell
adds that ne never saw Foote SO disconnected.
" What, sir !" he exclaimed indignantly, "to
talk thus Of man of liberal education; man
who for years was at the University of Ok
lord; a man who has added sixteen new char.
acters TO the literature Of hiD country -
Temple Bar.