The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1876-03-03
KEZIAH KINYON's FORTUNE.

TONS anu MS CyHiSIsh. OthaPS yOu
have met him at sources, singing baritone
solos in bass voice, and devoted to the
Madame Squalini of the hour. If such
has been your fortune, you will have
been informed how hopelessly Brown Is
a single man; and, therefore, feel no sur
prise in finding him, upon this occasion,
sitting very disconsolately, amid the
painful relics of his wash-basket, inven-
torying damages.
Three buttons off this shirt, and the
button holes torn out! That is just like
a woman-always taking the advantage
in the meanest way!' soliliquized he.
"Flanaghan knows l can't sew on but
ton hole. Heels out Of thai pair of socks,
toes out Of this, and my new boots SO
tight cant wear two pairs! Last week
it was the pocket twisted out 'of white
eest. which would have gotten me Il
thrashing, only that Scrimpton did not
observe that the picture WHICH dropped
through was of his wife. Dash Flana-
CHAN"
Brown turned ruetully from the wash
basket, and assumed devotional attitude
before the bureau drawer. He was some
what particular about his apparel, you
have Notwithstanding auburn hair, ana
n rather discouraging crook in the nasal
organ-and this was opera night.
"Handkerchlefs, handkerchiets! and
there are no handkerchiefs! l cannot
see what that old suds singer does with
them, unless she supplies furnishing
store. III be bowed If | don't marry the
first white American women that L meet
that can wsshp
Brown beat the air with his fists, kick
ed the drawer because it showed to lis
place in bitches, and finally shut all OF Il
sudden, tanning his thumb, scratched a
match viciously, lifted his pipe, sat down
with the air of martyr, and planted his
feet on the window-sill just as man
does when his righteous indignation Is
aroused against the opposite sex.
Il shall make tool of myself" he
went on between puffS, las all men who
marry do; but shall be Independent of
Flanagan, and she may 90 to-Staten
Island with her tow-headed orphan asy-
lumW
No doubt it was very ridiculous for a
man to fly into such temper over dam
AGED linen: but this was not the first
time by many that Brown had been
cheated out of anticipated pleasure by
his brotherhood and succession of
Flanaghans, and there always comes
that last straw to break the camels
back; therefore, We friends of the long
suffering, sympathize and wonder not at
n
determination.
The natural tendency of man is to-
wards matrimony; and where one passes
thirty WITHOUT having fulfilled the OBJ
iect of his being, there Is inevitably
reason for it. In Browns case it had
been an ideal-a sweet, true, gentle crea-
ture like unto the mother who built an
altar OF womanhood up in his boyish
heart, and, dying, left no vestal saint to
feed the flame there kindled. This Is not
so strange when one considers how hard
il is to read unwrItten characters, how
difficult to speak unutterable things, and
how little one knows of the world, In
whose carriages we ride, whose bouquets
we hold, whose waists we clasp.
So. while essentially ladies man,
Brown had never yet ielt stirring with
in him the ambition OF possesslon-the
true sweetness of womans association
had not vet interfered to weary him
with celibacy. The tranquilizing fumes
of the nicotine were long in asserting
their mower to soothe the savage on this
particular day; and the longer FIanag-
hans victim looked at the clothes basket
and thought of the opera, the
louder he mathematical that respect
able female. and the tercer grew his de-
termination 10 sacrifice himself upon the
domestic altar, provided there was an un-
married American woman TO be had VINO
could wash,
It is an undispu:ed axiom that bache'
lors have always peculiarities-lt Is the
coostan. wear oil welded life that rounds
Ms 90 our angles--and one OF Brown 5
net weaknesses was suburban residences
IAN apartment with view =
and, sgreeably to this pecuharity.
the room IN which he was now mentally
throwing himself away had an outlook
over little stretch of meadow, through
which ran struggling bit of brook
There was little story-and-a-hslt
house standing right in the midst OF this
green which our amlable friend verbally
RACED every timo he looked out OF the
| window-it was such an unlovely break
/ in the billowy slope Of verdure-and
/ still in itself the old house was not so
/ bad, either. 1t was brown, and gable
| rooted, ovcrrun with honeysuckles, and
/ an old willow with a hundred years
| growth in its ample waist made the
| little front ward bower Of shade All
ut once. and bv what cause Brown never
could determine. he became conscious
that there was n bench under that willow
tree, snd upon that bench stood wash
NH and at that washtub stood woman,
A binding prism suddenly flashed in
the impairment eyes of the fellow. IL
was ONLY soap-bubble breaking at the
washers elbow as she Strengthened up
from her bent position over the rnooinS
board and pressed one band l" her S'u@
but it broug ht back his boyhood ana th'
country home where his lips hsd hrst
learned the pressure of a pipestem IN
blowing bubbles happily into the face oi
time.
From his lookout, the toiler under the
willow tree appeared young and slender
He watched her rinse the clothes, wiring
them out. and pin them on the lne|he
wondered if there were strea&s and out
tonless wristbands there and when the
slight woman raised the line at last upon
atall, forKed pole, and disappeared under
the robin-nested porch, bachelor Brown
deliberately turned his back on the
window, as deliberately put out his pipe,
and rang the bell.
Enter Mrs. Fiutterby, reict OF the late
Flutter Flutterby, Esq, of the Flutter-
town Flutterer, and landlady in these
genteel lodgings.
"Who lives in that little house over in