Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1876-12-15
M. BUrrERwIok,s HORsE.
al. Surprising Vagar1es.

uGAdlutaA IGE db1uA clA WGGho- DllAh. M
absence Mrs. Butterwick assumed the re-
spOnsIbility for the. management Of the
horse, and as she knew as much about TAX
ing care of horses as she did about conduct
ing the processes of the sideral system, the
result was that Mr.. Butterwick's horse was
the unconscious parent Of infinite disaster.
When Butterwick returned and had kissed
his wife and talked over his journey, the
following conversation ensued. Mrs, But
terwick said:
..You know our horse dearestg'
''Yes, sweet; how IS he getting alOngY
''Not so rery well; he has cost great
deal of money since you've been away
'IndeedI'
s.Yes: besides his regular feed and Pat
rick's wages as hOstler, have on hand un-
paid bills to the amount Of two thousand
dollars on his account.
1.-TWO thousandi why Emma, you amaze
me; What on earth does it meanP
..Tl tell you the whole story, love. Just
after you left he took severe cold and he
coughed incessantly You could hear him
cough for miles. All theneighbors COM
planned of it; and Mr.. Potts, next door,
was so mad that he shot at the horse four
times. Patrick said it was the whooPing
cough"
''WhOoping cough, darling? Impossible.
horse never has whooping cough!
.sWeu. Patrick said so. And as l al
ways give paregoric to children when they
cough, l concluded that it would be good
for the horse, so l bought bucketful and
| gave it to him with sugar
"A bucketful of paregoric, my love! 1t
was enough to kill him.
patrick said that was regular dose for
| a horse of sedentary habits; and it didn't
kill him. 1t put him to sleep. You will
be surprised, Henry dear, to learn that the
horse Slept straight ahead for four weeks
never woke up once. | was frightened
about it, but Patrick told me that 1t was a
sign of a good horse. He said that Dexter
| often slept SIX months on stretch, and
that once they took Goldsmith Maid to a
race while she was sound asleep and she
trotted mile in 2:15, l think ne said,
without getting awake.
"Patrick said that, did hep
eyes: that was at the end of the second
week. But as the horse didn't rouse up
Patrick said it couldn't be the paregori(
that kept him asleep so long: and he camt
to me and asked me not to mention it, but
he had suspicious that Mr.. Potts had mes
merized him.
Il never heard of horse being mesmer
lied, dearest"
"Neither did I; but Patrick said it wa
common thing with the better class o
horses. And when he kept on sleeping
dear, l got frightened, and Patrick consult
ed the horse-doctor, who came over with {
galYanic battery which he said would wax
the horse. They fixed the wire to his les
and turned on the current. 1t did rous
him. He got up and kicked fourteen
boards out of the side of the stable, anC
then Jumped the fence into Mr.. Pott'
ward, where he trOd on litter OF youns
pigs. kicked two cows to death, and bit tn
tops off of eight apple trees. Patrick salt
he tried to swallow Mrs. Potts baby; but
didn't see him do that"
THE man that sold him to me did no
mention that he was fond of babies.
but he got over the attack. The onl,
effect was that the paregoric or the elec
tricity or something turned his hair all tn
wrong way, and he looks the queerest yoV
ever saw. Oh, yes, it did seem to atfec
his appetite, too. He appeared to be mos
always hungry. He ate up the hay racl
and two sets of harness and the dasher ol
the best carriage. And one night he brok
out and nibbled off all the door knobs ol
the back of the house, and ate three sheet
and pair of drawers from the clothes line
besides four croquet balls and one OF m.
old hoop skirts"
door knobs, Emma! Has he shown
fondness for door knobs?'
eyes; and he ate Louisa's hymn-book
too. She left it lying on the table on tn
porch. Patrick said he knew man in Ire
land whose horse would starve to dealt
. unless they fed him on Bibles. If he coult
not get Bibles, he'd take Testaments; bu
unless he got Scriptures of some kind, h
was utterly intractable."
81 would like to have a look at tina
horse, sweet.
so we got the horse doctor again. an
he said that what the poor animal wante
was hypodermic injection of morphia t
calm his nerves, He told Patrick to get
: machine for placing the morphia under tn
horses skin. But Patrick said he could
it without the machine. So one day he &c
the morphia, and began-to bore hole i
. the horse with gimlet."
"a gimlet, Emma?'
can ordinary giInlet. But it seemed III
D pleasant to the horse, and so he kicked Pa
rick through the PARTITION, breaking thre
I of his ribs Then | got the doctor to pei
form the operation properly, and the hors
Z after that appeared right well, exceptin
Z that I noticed that he had suddenly az
: quired an extraordinary propensity fC
standing on his head.
! ''He is the first horse that ever wanted I
!. do that, love.p 'afH i. soy g
n ''Patrick said not. He told me about
4 man that he worked for in Oshkosh WI
q had team of mules which always stoo
Z on their heads when they were not at worl
4 He said all the mules in Oshkosh did s,
!. So Patrick tied heavy stone to oil
{ horses tail to balance him and keep
!, straight. And this worked to charm
) until took the horse to church one SUI
9 day. when, while crowd stood around hi
\ looking at him. he swung his tail aroun
d and Drained six boys with the stone."
g Drained them, lover .s...-.
: swell, didn't see them myself; Bl
4 Patrick told me when | came out of chuTc
. that they were as good as; dead. And
. said he remembered that that Oshkosh ma
4 used to coax his mules to stand on the
u legs by letting them hear music. 1t SCOT
ed them, he said. And so Patrick got
: friend to come around and sit in our stal
e and calm our horse by playing on the a
cordeon."
: F'Did it make himcalmer?"
!, ''lt seemed to, at first; but one day Pa
rick undertook to bleed him for the bliI
= staggers, and he must have cut the horse
i the wrong place, for the poor brute ft
d over on the accordion person and died
e nearly killing the musician"
!" ''The horse is dead, then. Where is t
10 biIl?' s.az-5.
!. : g s.I'I read it to you:"'
= THE BILL.
i: Horse doctors fees. 1875