Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1876-01-21
I,OTerh by Proxy.

If one cannot be lover oneself The
next best thing is to make love ON some
body else's account, At least so seemitO
think large number of persons who are
never so happy as when they areuptO
their nccks In, matters matrimonial and
things pertaining thereto These sympa.
thetic souls are firmly convinced thai they
have been born into the world for pro
noting marriages and lovesmaking ,sand
they are, consequently, continually laying
traps for the unwary. III you are gentle
man who has notyet s1ccunbed TO the fas-
of some charming young ladyto
the extent of putting your head through
the moose of wedlock, you may soon learn
how very kind these benefcent beings can
be, and how energetically they can work
on their behalf OF course IL Is assumed
that you ought to get married, and that
you would do so il you could only get
The chance. This much being taken for
granted, it is considered that twill only.
be an act of kindness TO hurry you on to
bliss somewhat quicker, indeed, than you
seem inclined to go. You are told that
YOU ought 70 do as your dear, charitable
friends desire, and il is not very long be-
fore a host of excellent and fascinating
young ladies are picked out for you 10
choose from II is no strange thing for
you not 10 know your own mind in refer
ence to the sweet creatures; perhaps, in
deed, you are in such helpless state that
you signally fail to dream or think of any
one in particular. Your good angels
have, therefore, no option but to make
choice for you. Having resolved to do so
it is not very long before they mark out
definite course for themselves to pursue.
They have seen you speak 10 Miss Brown
and look absent-minded as you shook her
hand, and this is regarded as proof con-
elusive that you are in love, though as a
matter of fact you looked absent-minded
because you had suddenly remembered
that your tailor had sent you an imperti-
nent letter, in re a certain little account
and that you had forgotten to answer it as
you had intended to do. However, it hav
ing been settled that you have lost your
heart to Miss Brown, and it having also
been settled that the dear girl only needs
TO be asked to tell you that she is yours
forever, and it having further been de-
cided that the pair of you are eminently
| suited for each other, series OF clever
strategic maneuvers are executed. You
| and Miss Brown, in the first place, are
taken under the wing of those who are
constituting themselves the presiding
spirits Of your destiny. These spirits are
generally feminine ones, and often have
houses of their own and husbands, the
I lutieE vi WDOh lutJ suCCttu III IudhlhB
unwilling parties to their plots. One day
you receive. an invitation TO visit Mrs.
Matrimony at her house, and to your as
constituent you discover Miss Brown.
This is but the beginning, however. In
due course you find yourself sitting by the
beguiler-quite by accident you innocent
ly imagine-and by and by to you falls
the delightful task of pioneering her to
supper, or of turning over her music as
she sings some love song. Meanwhile
your movements are scrutinized with the
keenest interest, and your conduct excites
no small amount of criticism; you
would, no doubt, be astonished to
learn how guilty and loye-stricken
you look After few moves of
J this sort the affair is regarded as settled.
When Mrs. Matrimony takes leave of you
she smiles and smIrks in an awfully pro-
found manner, making believe that she
| knows everything, and could tell great
5 deal if she only chose to do so. Then she
makes insinuations in the presence of you
| and Miss Brown which cause the pair of
e you to blush and look uncommonly stu
+ pid, at which her delight reaches a crown
ing pitch. No doubt she will call you a
sly dog, and Miss Brown a deep one-at
! any rate, by implication-and there is no
= doubt, also, that she will more than once
I ing YOU what. a dear, good, virtuous,
e amiAble, lady like girl Miss Brown is,
!. and what nice little fortune she will
l have. Besides all this, she spreads re-
i ports abroad to the effect that it is only a
c question of time as TO when YOU will
: finally bring the matter to head, and she
docs her best to hasten your movements
c by lying in wait for you at the churches,
i at theaters, at parties, at bazaars, at
n soirees, on promenade and in the streets,
s with Miss Brown at her heels. She would
= be very angry with you If she imagined
S that you would have the audacity to
o choose a wife for yourself in spite of her
r selection. OF course, you often fall vic
n tim to her wiles, but when you do SO you
+ do not choose to think that your wife has
IS been chosen for you, and that she has
'f practically, been courted by proxy-that
n In word, the match has been brough
e about by clever schemers in whose hands
st you have been as plastic as putty. zs q
e Often, however, you do not marry. Mis-:
n Brown, but carry into effect your prefer
: ence for Miss Green then there is d
u STERN in which you suffer. You have
1t acted very badly, cries one; they nevel
IS thought that you could be guilty of sucl
IS conduct, say others, and so it comes abou
Is that you are considered a black sheeI
IL L
g. and innocent maidens to approach. Per
J. haps in some instances, Miss Brown her
self thinks that she has been scandalous
d ly ill.used, and that it is a shame that tn
)t retributlve hand of justice does not over
N take YOU. You learn in a roundabou
e way that " young men should not do sucl
n things, il they do not mean something
At 1t may be that so skillfully have you beer
d manipulated that you yourself feel NOR
or less guilty and ashamed of what yoV
at have done, though you may angril,
=, bewail that il is very hard tha
oi fellow cannot say few ciyl
c. things to a girl or look at her withou
lg everyone jumping to the conclusion tha
20 if he is not engaged to her he ought :
es be. 1t is strange, indeed, if you realiz
!" the true cause of your troubles, sor
G. though you may be against the lady VIII
ck has courted you by proxy and who Is th
e- loudest of all concerned in denunciation
ct of your conduct. Perhaps you learn prt
lg dence and avoid young women and tres
d. them eOldly; perhaps, indeed, you com
lg TO the conclusion that il is Impossible tu
al there to be real and safe friendship b.
ng tween young men and women, and act az
p cOrdingly. Under these circumstances,
ne lovers by proxy were not ior the mo-
set mart very selfsatisfed and enthusiast
~ lot OF pefSOnSI they lhishl SASoAAJ PSSANss-4'
in that they do more harm than good; bu
'c as Il is, il is to be feared that they cor
he tinue 10 meddle with and muddle the for
he unes of such marriageable young peop
lis as are thrown across their paths, ,-Li6er
In Reuielo. - q.
ge -
pc, DEPUTY.SHERIFF Snow, of Lltchtiel'
ne, Conn. was fearfully mangled the oth,
res day by q vicious hog, which unexpected
les ran his tusk into Shows leg, shiyerin
to the bone. BY keeping hold OF the animal
ms hack he managed to save his life butzl !
at was tossed about by the savage boar unit
he his legs were terribly mangled. WIS
It'll the animal at length dropped HIM
to managed 10 get into the barn and swiI
nd 10 the door. His life was At first d
at t..s n a.. noun tbnnukt ha W