The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1876-02-23
a CHICAGO DRUMMER.
Iiis Sad Experience Ia NOdaMay.
Missouri.

Missouri,
The New York Mercury Is responsl
for the following:
"Run, gals, aud shuclI yourselves II
u hurTyi the stranger y comm In. Ana
Missouri Ann, you must idst git Inter
them Sundy duds o. your'n quIcker'u
shoolln' er you'Il heer from me, your
n0lhern
That WAS what Mrs. Manlngale, OF
Nodaway county, Missouri, told her
daughters, when she saw n well dress
cd man ride up 10 her hitChlHg-sail
ana alight from his horse.
Come right In, stranger Take q
cheer and sit down. Fine weather
now for A. most anything Shed yer
great coat, Stranger and come clus to
the fire and git warm, The gals Is
gone TO shuck themselves, but they
won't be mOre'n mint about it,
He was "A Chicago drummer, aud he
had lost his road. Prudent mothers In
Nodaway don't encourage the atten-
lions Of Chicago drummers, because
they say those gentlemen from Chic0-
bO Wlt 'Hp utfNuUI men,
lie was II married man At home, but
he didn't go around introducing him
self everywhere ms the happy father of
the six smartest boys In the State Of
Illinois; nor did he carry pOcketiul
of his wife's photographs to distribute
In every town Oh his road, lie sold
drugs and druggists sundrles on COM
mission; and he was ready to bet his
bottom dollar that he sold more qui-
nine, calomel and GodGrey's cordial in
one month than any man travelling
out Of Chicago.
He didn't feel bad about 1t when
Mrs, Martingale slung her kettle on
the fire and set her coffee mill To
grinding for him. On the contrary,
he encouraged her endeavors 10y say
ing that he never saw woman with II
head shaped like hers who couldn't
just knock The spots or everything
when she tried her hand at frying
spare.rib or making coffee. She tried
to disparage her cooking by saying
that the shoats this year didn't pan
out according to expectations; then
the weather had been 80 warm that it
was mighty hard work to keep spare
ribs and joles from spelling.
He didn't require any second invita-.
ton to sit up and help himself to her
hot cookery, and he wasn't bothered
with looking over bill Of fare TO see
what he wanted. He made square
meal on it before she had time to ask
him where he was from, or whether he
was married or single. The daughters
in their prettiest just when
he was moving back from the table.
"Strainger, this Is my darter, Mis-
souri, ann; that one is Florida Jane,
and tother one is Sadie Maria.
They're just about as peert gals as thar
Is in Nodaway. They're all ov 'em
willln' to spark. Now, gals, sit down
and talk to the Stranger"
And Mrs. Mariingale busted herself
clearing the table, leaving her charm
ing daughters to entertain the Chicago
man of drugs, when suddenly it occur
red to her that she had not yet learned
where he was from, nor what his call
ing was-two important things for n
prudent mother to know.
81 reckon you're from Omaha or the
Bluffs, Mister? ~
"No; | hal! from further east.n
"Iou're from over the river in New
brasky, anyhowW
ono; | live in Chicago
"Shecargo! Gals shuck back agin
inter your old buds He amt worth u
lead nickel. Amt you looking for "a
pardner misterW
"No; | don't want to marry
"Then you jest git and git mighty
sudden, We amt no green goose
berries-me and my gals. We don't
want no man coming around yer that
amt looking for PARTNERS. Now you
git! Florida Jane, you call them
dogs ~
That Chicago man Of drugs mounted
his horse and rode away in such haste
that he forgot to say good-by. But the
next night when he met three drummer
friends in Omaha and told them the
story, they all sighed and called for
hot drinks at his expense, for they
were sorry to see such innocence trav-
cling from Chicago,