The Arizona sentinel., 1876-06-10


NOrriStOlCn Herald.
A Preston man has decided not
to go this Centennial. He says
they always do a thing better the
second time and will wait for the
next one.-NOraCicR Bulletin.
Mr.. Emerson thinks that men
ought to trust each other more,
and there seems to be general
feeling hereabOuts that he is the
man to open a small grocery in
this sectiOn.-NOrUich Bulletin.
A lady who had her dress trim
med with bugles, before going to
ball was asked by her daughter
if the bugles would blow when
she danced. "Oh, no." said the
mother, "papa will do that when
he sees the BILL"
Young ladies can now be seen
oiling the gate hinges. They
don't do it out of any love for the
gate. They do it to prevent the
gate from singing" when the
family is wrapt in slumber.
A correspondent of the New
York San wants a law passed for
bidding girls marrying until they
are twenty-five years old; but we
think there are dead laws enough
on the statute books nOW.-RO-
chester Democrat.
What bores in the future people
who 90 to the Centennial will
prove themselves to those who
stay at home. It will be as bad
as the pestiferousness of the man
or woman who has been to "Yar-
rup."-j&, Louis Republican.
A Chicago man has solved the
query: "What shall we do with
our .daughters~ He has pur-
chased two washing machines,
and will take in washing. His
wife and their seven daughters
are to do the work, and he will
superintend the business.
A Texas farmer named Wade
says he caught rabbit on his
place the other day, having on its
head seven horns. But before we
believe this story we want to know
how many "hOrns :" Wade had
on his own head when he looked
at the animal.
Some young ladies of WhitmOre
Lake, Mich, undertook to get up
a donation for the Rev. T. E.
Pierce. by retailing kisses, and
succeeded in disposing of ninety,
for which the aggregate receipts
were 81 so. A fve-cent kiss can't
be of much better quality than a
Scent cigar.
A Preston man was relieved last
week OF a water snake, which, it
is believed, he swallowed ten
years ago. His friends always
said there was more in him than
people thought.-NoraCich BotIe'
tin.
In a complaint filed in the Dis
trict Court in Sacramento, for
non-payment of taxes, a tract of
land in the city Of Los Angeles is
thus described Bounded on the
east by Gospel Swamp, on the
west by Eternity street, on the
south by Virgin alley, on the north
by Charity lane.-ALtG.
APennsylvania man has inven-
ted little instrument by the use
of which a man may snore in
church without making any noise.
Lots of men fool away their time
on motors and such things. and
do no good to any one. Here's a
man who's real benefactor Of
the human race.
A young man in Western Wis
consin, who was about to be mar
ried the other day, suddenly re-
membered that he hadn't fed his
horse, and the ceremony had to
wait until the horse had been
cared for. He explained that a
good horse couldn't be found
every day, while thirteen differ
ent girls wanted TO marry him.
Boston Transcript.
Appearances are often deceitful;
but when a man who is engaged
to a red-haired girl is seen at
midnight with both arms round
a street. lamp, telling it it is too
sweet to live, it is usually safe to
presume that a new kind of tenn
perance bitters has been introduce
ed into the neighborhood.-No
1Cicb Bulletin.
The pin back and the corset
having failed to kill the ladies of
Mississippi, they have gone to
chewing snuff. With suicidal
energy they have thrown away
their spruce gum, and taken to
Scotch snuff with a vengeance.
The physicians are becoming