The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-04-28
Pith and Point.

COMPANION to the learned pig-a
spelling bee.
THE treasury girls call man /" Bub"
until he is forty-seven.
WHISKY is more easily rectifed than
the mistakes it causes.
THE more our girls are pinned back
the more forward they seem.
A CANDID old bachelor says After
all, woman's heart is the sweetest in
the world it's perfect honeycomb-
full of sells.
WHEN Wyoming woman is up
braided for selling her vote for a stick
of gum, she politely but firmly informs
her annoyer that she shall do just as she
chews.
"IF use it I'll be just as dirty after
it's gone if 1 sell it can have pea
nuts and ride home, too" soliloqUized
bootblack when he found cake OF
toilet soap.
A HUNTER shot wild turkey near
Nashville, the other day, and when he
went to pick it up, found lying near 1t
half-decayed pair of saddle-bags, In
which were $36, 900 in gold and bonds
"CAN you see me, dearest r. said
Chicago man to his dying wife. "TeD
me, can you see me2" "No," she
family whispered, "but 1 can smell
your breath"
WE once asked the veteran punster,
Catlin, why it was that certain point
on the Mississippi was called Maiden's
Bluff, and he innocently answered
because it's virgin on the river"
brooklyn Argus.
SAID teacher "What do the vari-
GUS objects that you behold upon the
earth all display 2" To which q boy of
the :" fust jography class replied in
breathless haste !: Wisdom n good
ness of tn equator"
A BOY was asked which was the great
est evil, hurting another's feelings or his
finger. "The feelings" he said. "Right,
my dear child" said the gratified priest
"and why is it worse to hurt the feel
ings 2" because you can't tie a rag
round them," exclaimed the child.
Mr.. MOODY says man is failure.
Probably Mr.. Moody never saw young
man play base ball all day, and billiards
half the night, and get up in the morn
ing and jaw around an hour because his
mother didn't put more stfffening in his
shirt bosom. Man failnre, indeed l.
NorristOWn Herald.
so wAGs THE WORLD.
Memory cannot linger long;
Joy must die the death
Hopes like little silver song
Fading in a breath.
So wags the weary world away
Forever and day.
But love- that sweetest madness,
Leaps and grows in toll and sadness,
Makes unseeiHg eyes to see,
And heapeth wealth in penury.
SO Wigs the good old world away
Forever and day.
BROWN came home late the other
night, says Hohokus, and Mrs. Brown,
looking out of the bedroom window, OBJ
served, {" So you've been tipping the
glass again, have you9" "Glass," said
Brown, "(hic) it's funny word take
off the 'g' and it's you, my dear"
eyes" answered Mrs. B., "and then
take off the q and it's you, you
wretch" and she slammed the window
down with bounce. e.-New York Ad-
Uertiser.
IT is generally accepted as good sign
when sick person is cross and peevish
"a sign that he is on the gain. A Fifth
street man was taken down with lung
fever some weeks since, and his wife has
watched over him and seen him 80 near
death 80 often that she was about dis
couraged. She, however, rushed into a
neighbor's yesterday in great Joy and
excitement, crying out "He's better
he's better-he's on the gain |" They
asked how she knew, and she replied
because he's cross 1t is only a min
ute ago that he threw fork at me and
called me the biggest liar and meanest
woman in Detroit !'-F1ee Press.