, 1876-05-19
Detroit Currency.
THE Empress of India is on good term
with Queen Victoria.

lHE Empress OF India IS on good terms
with Queen Victoria.
Troy exhibits $50 Centennial Sunday
hats. Secure your railroad tickets now.
SETH GREENE has no sympathy for
whales. He got too many of them when
he was schoolboy.
THE death of A. T Stewart will proba-
bly, be taken by some men as another
warning not to get rich.
AN Iowa Sunday school doesn't mean
to be fooled this year, and has fixed for
a May-day party on the 1st of July.
DON PEDRo's wife is a little bit of a
woman with dancing eyes, and she dances
a quid of gum in her mouth when not in
society.
IT is noticed that a man is just as mad
if you point an empty gun at him as he is
when the gun is loaded. Therefore put
in load.
SOME one has been stealing spittoons
from the Louisiana State House. Can't
lay it to the members, for they spit on
the floor and walls.
A AMEMBER of the Louisiana Legislature
sent his wife sixteen calico dresses when
he drew his first pay. Susan B. may deny
it, but the facts are there.
A CINCINNATI physician says that peo-
Pile catch cold through their ears. He
admits that his assertion is not meant to
cover. any case outside of that city.
BRIGHAM YOUNG has four family
physicians, and he pays them by the
year. His idea of good doctor is; "a
man who kills or cures within week" "
IT was a very kind-hearted man who
proposed to ballast new Southern rail-
road with sawdust so that people wouldn't
be hurt much when they fell off the cars.
INDIANA papers have found out that
California beats the Hoosier State for di-
vorces. A Sacramento judge isn't over
twelve minutes breaking a family all to
pieces.
THE Chinese cheaper American labor
in California, but are not white men pa
triotic enough to work for the same
wages which blamed foreigner can get
rich ONT
THE st. Louis Republican calls for a
city ordinance to force tramps to earn
their bread and butter. Suppose tramp
doesn't like bread and butter, but wants
sweetcakel
A Boston doctor says that people who
chew gum great deal are apt to have
sOftening of the brain. Some doctors be-
lieve that the softening comes before the
chewing.
The Rochester Chronicle wants to know
why any man who can get out of St. Louis
will stay there. Some one has 70 remain
to take care of the mud and keep the
postofice open.
AN old railroad traveller says there are
not ten hotels in the United States where
man can get good cup of coffee. He
thinks all hotel drinks can be put
under the head of "slops."
A DEAF man living in Connecticut al
ways walks on the railroad track when
he can. He has been lifted off several
times by locomotives, but he sticks to il
that railroad routes save time.
ABRoKEN heart can't be seen and is
easily mended. A broken nose knocks a
mans beauty all to pieces. And yet
Wisconsin juries put a broken heart at
5000 damage, and a broken nose at
5000.
A MAN'from Michigan has been a clerk
in government service at Washington for
the last sixteen years, and he brags that
he has had to change his political and
religious views but two hundred and
eight times.
IT would do some Of the first settlers
of jamestown, Virginia, good to come to
life and take peep at that town. They
would find everything about as they left
it, only little older, with more knot
holes to be seen.