Smyrna times., 1876-03-22
SOper's Error.

Mr.. Soper's wife has been very sick for |
some weeks, but, although extremely re-
duced in body and mind, there is still
enough of the true women remaining in
her, which led her last week in a faint
whisper, to ask her husband, who had en-
tered the sick room with funeral cast of
features, what was the news.
"Why," answered Mr.. Soper, sitting
uneasily down on the extreme edge of
chair, and balancing his hat on his fingers
by the brim, "there amt nothing to speak
of n p'ticler. Spose you have heard of
Miss Coles death; she was taken the same
time you was"
. 81 should think, James," said Mrs.
Soper, with feeble emphasis, 4" that if you
couldn't find somethin'' more cheerful to
say to your poor, sick wife, you'd hold your
tongue"
Certainly" said Mr.. Soper, meekly,
5 only news is SO scarce. Lemme see," he
; continued, looking thoughtfully into the
crown of his hat, as if he had reserved
, fund of gossip therein, "youve heard bout
Marthy Carter's breal1in' her leg"
r A Spanish nod of the head from the in
valid signifed to Mr. Soper that he was on
t dangerous ground, but after a moments re-
Election he frightened visibly as he said
"You Orter ben to town meetn' Mon
4 day. The towns voted to have new
t hearsh, an l never was so glad of any thing
e in all my life"
s "James Edward Soper," whispered his
d wife, with painful intensity, abe you a
r nat'ral born fool, or be you loollin' for
r ward to gttin' rid of me?"
y As the latter view had never presented
d itself to Mr.. Soper in the light of his wife's
inquiry, he looked very much subdued, and
l scratched his head with an air of painful
y abstraction as Mrs. Soper said again with
r a fearful voice:
II ooh, you can go. If you can't spare a
n few momen's to set with me, an jes' Civ
n me some little interestin' news-I don't
want you to stay ag'in your inclination, -
she continued with sigh of martyr.
1t Mr.. Soper hastily expressed his willing
Y, ness to remain and desire to please, SC
N after a brief interval of thought he con
i, tinued rehectively.
h DWELL, lemme think. | was over to the
W widder Stancy's last night to see if
le couldn't make trade for Jersey heifer
an tell you, Myria,' said Mr. Soper en-
r. Enthusiastically, " if she amt harnsum crit
le ter, never see one."
* An ominous light appeared in Mrs
Soper's sunken eyes, and if her husband
a had been observing closely he would have
%. seen restless motion of the hands, indica
n, tive Of an apparent desire to make a pei
n /; sonal attack upon some one or something
ct but he saw nothing, and continued:
n "She's just about the right size, an he
On skin as white as snow. She's got tn
pootiest legs" continued the unrefectn
EN- Mr.. Soper, with a descriptive motion c
the hand; "an' when you come to tall
at about shape-why, M'ria," said Mr.. Sopel
rising from his chair in his warmth, ''she'
". measure two feet across her breast"
to The scream which came from the Athlete
ne invalid at this juncture was of such pie
mt cling shrillness that Mr.. Soper placed hi
fingers in his ears, and Mrs. Soper
as mamma, who was in the next room, al
asst peared on the scene in the twinkling of a
let eye.
if "0h, you awful brutel she exclaime
YER as she bathed her daughters brow with h,
oil in mistake for camphor, while I'll
ing wretched man feebly endeavored to explai
the that he was only telling Mrs. Soper abol
lin Jersey heifer that he was going to buy
of "There, MAJ said Mrs. Soper, with
sed grasp, !" I'm better now"
tel "You'd better leave the room" said IL
md matron, with world of significant wra
esh in her eye, and the fortunate Soper d
the parted, muttering, as he slammed the OF
side door behind him, that he'd be mast
in his own house some day; but he hasr
been yet, for Mrs. Soper has recovered, al
his her mother has taken up permanent re
nv dence with them.
his To this day they don't speak to t
,r widow Stacy, and Mrs. Soper's reiterat
eyes explanation has always been received
wn. dignifed and incraFlulous silence.
WHAT THE Wire DIp FOR HIM.-0liN
+, Wendell Holmes falls into nautical phra
~ ology to the following effect: II ha
:" known more than one genius, highdeck,
fullfreighted, wide-sailed, gay-pennon
= that, but for the bare, toiling arms, a
ne, a,, brave, warm, beating heart of the faith
sy little wife that nestled close in his shad
and clung to him so that no wind or WI
who could part them, would soon have &c
ne is down the stream, and been heard of
enty more.n
t she @--
Ia thought it would. The moral Of the BE
aad nap affair is simply that public ofic
e. should live without ostentation. The n
- who can afford to spend $4,000 y
"'D'9 should live on $500, and put the rest j