The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1876-01-13
Concerning Umbrellas.


'Tli wager the best box of cigars in
the city,"
"Done."
This short dialogue took place be.
tween two young men as they rushed
breathlessly down two flights OF
stairs, and, seiZing hats and umbrel-
las, issued from the door Of a fashion,
able clearinghouse On-Street,
New York city. A young lady was
just stepping upon a hOrse-ear before
the door, and both hurried toward it.
The car passed on, leaving the two
lines of aristocratic houses that COM
posed the street wrapped in the mists
OF the rainy afternoon.
That evening a young lady entered
the dining-roOm of one OF these aris-
tocratic houses, and on being chided
for lsteDess, rejoined, pettishly.
81 couldn't help it mamma. I've
been so unfortunate 20 day. Ideelare
1 could cry !"
"Wby, how? What do you
mean 2"
'In the first place, left my purse
on my toilette-table, l was in such a
hurry to catch that car. stuffed the
bank check into my glove for safety.
[ went to the bank and got it cashed
fifty dollars, you know-and it oc-
Cured to me the money wouldn't be
safe in my cloak pocket, so l un-
screwed the top of the handle of my
umbrella and put the bills in that
hollow within the broad part. Then 1
went to the photographers and got my
proofs, and, for want Of a better place,
foolishly put those in the hollow
too. Well, it rained in torrents, and
two young men were following me.
You needn't look shocked, mamma
they were, though they did it very
unobtrusively, I've seen both of
them before, aud I believe they room
opposite. At any rate, they got on
the car that / did this noon, and they
got on the one that came home in.
One OF them sat next to me, and the
other near the door on the opposite
side, and IL 1 turned my eyes any
where but straight forward, was
sure to receive a glance OF admira-
tion."
"We'n dispense with that part of
it, Mary"
"No, we can't, mamma" was the
demure response, "for my confusion,
and the fact of my umbrellas drip
ping all over my dress, caused the
catastrophe. l had to set the um-
brella aside a little, you see, and
when / got up to leave the car, both
those young men rushed for the door.
It was really cOmieal, mamma. I
was no sooner outside the car then
two umbrellas met over my head, and
there stood the two young gentlemen,
both quite determined to escort me to
the house door. 1 never wanted to
laugh so much but l didn't laugh.
1 thanked them with very dignified
bOw-one apieee-then producing my
own umbrella from the folds Of my
waterproof, opened that, and walked
of. Mamma" J" continued the speak
er, tragieally, 81 never will have an
other umbrella that is like every one
else's."
81 don't see at all what you're com.
ing to, Mary" said her mother, per-
plexedly. "What was the trouble ?"
Trouble? Why, mamma, when !
got home found hadn't my own
um mbrella at all, but some one else's
Just like mine %
"And the fifty dollars and photo
graph proofs ?''
"Were gone"
"Why, you careless girl How
could you have done such a thing ?'
SIT is the greatest shame in the
world that umbrellas are made so
much alike" was the vexed response.
'Is the one you nave just like
yours ?n
Precisely black alpaca, with an
ivory handle"
"Somebody must have stolen yours,
or, rather, exchanged purposely."
"l don't think it, mamma in fact,
know they couldn't. No one could
have known what was in the andle
of mine and the one brought home
is much sprucer. Pm sure the per-
son who took mine would never think
of looking in the handle"
"Perhsps not"
"But, mamma, want the fifty dol
lars else how can I have that light
silk dress ?"
'I dare say you do, but you can't
have it just now."
"But 1 must" And the speak .
coaxingly put her hand on her moth
er's arm.
"Nonsense. Advertise your um.
brella. some of the people on the cal
must have It,"
Two days later appeared an adver.
| tisement in the Herald to this effect
GLost, on Tuesday last, on an EnglisE
Avenue car, at O'Clock, black alpaca uin
! brella, with ornRmented ivory handle. Tn,
finder viii be rewarded If it is returned Il
No. Street"
"H,m !i said Miss Mary Armstrong
as she glanced over this paragraph il
the mornings paper "that'll never
bring back the umbrella"
In the bachelor apartments across
the street the advertisement was diff
ferently commented upon. Mr.. Franz
Kennedy, who had been fitting bach
in his armchair, when bis eye fel
unon 1t, suddenly sprang to his fee
with an exclamation,
"By-GeOrge, pll win that wager =
81 WONDER" he continued, appre
hensively, "if Courtenay'll see it
I'll borrow his morning paper for feal
be will. Why, what royal road t.
an introduction this Is : pll take al
um brella-any umbrella-my owl
would answer the description-no, by
George it's too much worn out, anC
Ia be ashamed of it-and go over ant
present myself. Courtenay'll be fu
rious-ha ha +! By George, though
how did this umbrella get SO shabby
I've only had it four weeks. pII pt
by q new one, black alpaca, with
carved ivory handle, and introduc,
myself to Miss Armstrong with that
I feel that box Of cigars already in NJ!
pocket"
Mr.. Kennedy walked across the hal