The New York herald., 1876-12-24
Christmas Gifts, Christmas ObseryQnceS and
Christmas Literature.
RED HOT FUN AMONG THE BROKERS.

-
Board he is q regular ballot box stufer. He won't
throw out "bu-doze' single parish, but, gliding
from house to house. he will put the mark OF his ap-
proval upon every box submitted to his inspection.
But IL would be mistake to suppose he can do all
this without assistance. He IS In himself full and
complete Returning Board but, hko other honorable
boards and ofcial bodles he is not without an army
OF followers retaners He needs them for he has
very great work perform and only night TO do
II in. There Is much buying and selecting 10 be
done, many and whlms be satisfied, and SO
many stockings TO be filled, that even Santa Klaus
could satisfy all tho returns without the co-opera-
tion OF fairies and OF men. Every house is to be
visited not child must be overlooked forgotten,
and sayety and music must precedc his coming.
For pleasure hath not ceased TO wait
On these expected annual rounds
Whether the rich mans sumptuous gate
Gail forth the unelsborn,e sounds.
Or they are Offered ere. ,I.., at the door loo pr,
Elaborate preparations arc necessary for the work
10 be performed on Christmas Eve, and to this end
Santa Klaus appoints any number OF committees or
Investigation advance. Conventions and caucuses
held In every part OF the world, these being COM
posed Of school boys and school girls dolls fairies
aud and women. In these bodies the whole Ques-
tion canvassed and discussed, all the necessary in
formation Is gathered and subsequently, impaired to
Santa Klaus. and It happens that the work Of the
Returning Board is all cut and dried" beforehand
ADJUxors RETURNING BOARD.
For weeks before Christmas the public schools are
ali ablazo with the excitement Of tho approaching
The rule OF three loses It's terrors in tho more
interesting mysteries connected with the probable
turns which Santa Klaus will make. The nominative
longer agrees with the verb the adjective quail
hes the noun, but conjugatIons and dcclsnsons are
both loft take care OF themselves ~ am going to
have rocking horse for Christmas" says Johnny,
pleasure some spirit bears the wish to the councils
OF the Board OF Christmas Returns and Santa Klaus
records II among his memoranda ~ want book, /"
cries Fred and the fairies watch hs face
catch his fancy and bear word the Returning Board
whether he prefers the "Arabian Nights" or robin
Crusoe or the sSwiss Family Robinson" "Un-
dine and Sintram." An athletic lad is hoping for a
bat and ball for summer or for q slod or
pair OF skates for the In the streets and the Ice
In the park. The wish is true II IL is
well defined that Santa Klaus mako mistake
about IT. but when boy wishes for everything at
the Returning Board apt 10 give him something left
over from last year. The school girls, too busy
with their hopes and whilc they are giving vent to
their wishes the dolls in convention considering
their Petty has been very good girl this
year and she must have doll with bluo eyes and
golden hair says the Chairman Santa Klaus is At
once informed OF the resolution OF the convention
Dolly has forgotten her lessons, and she is voted
wooden baby with painted eyes, instead OF real
concurrent resolution is passed, proposing Jackin
the-Box or Petty's brother, or parches board for
some youngster who Is special avorltc with the
doll world. IL is thus the work goes on In every
department and bureau, convention and caucus. com
mice and council which adjunct 10 tho operations
Of tho Returning Board on Christmas Eve, and even
The angels sing OF holy aspirations,
pure am" and happy ssn. m ana ee,sa
That seem as II they came from Christmas chimes
MERRY CHRISTMAS
IL 10 the purpose OF Santa Klaus and all his attend
ants TO make Christmas merry. III could work my
will" said scrcogc who quite much the Christ
ogre Santa Klaus is tho Christmas saint every
idiot who goes about with Merry Chrislmss' on his
lips should be boiled with his pudding aud buried
wth q stake or holly run through his heart" Such
sanguinary sentiments have place in the carols OF
The Returning Board, ana even Santa Klaus himself
has been heard to sng:-
Hang sorrow care will kill cat,
And therefore let's be merry.
II is OF the ordained rules Of this important
ci that Jack shall pipe and Gill shall sing and all the
Scrooges In the world prevent IL than they
suppress the Returning Board itself Nose and
mrth much part OF Christmas as the Christ
mas saint himself and he feels bound TO protect tneso
privileges OF the season. He is Jolly old fellow
himself, and he does his work with laugh and merry
twinkle OF the eye which seem to indicate that he
would not be avcrse to shot Scotch or "Tom and
AN iSrxsvIEw WITH SANTA KLAUS
When IL was ascertained that Santa Klaus had bcen
ehoseu Returning Board 10 canvass the Christmas
boxes reporter OF the HERALD despatched 10 In
the old fellow ior ike Jcir Davis when recently in
New York, he was not disposed To be interviewed. Hc
was found At last however on the top OF chimney 80
high that II overlooked all the world and at the same
time allowed the operations OF the Board 10 DO carried
with the utmost secrecy. 1.-The deuce of knaves y
said Santa Klaus, when hc saw the reporter and hts
note book. "The OF hearts, if you please" an
swered the reporter 'You seem TO be good natured
u No =. So
porter al only wish speak with for the benefit Of
the HERALD" THE HERALD bel beg pardon, {" the
2nrt kod ali tlQ
but the Scroogc party have put me out OF all
They havo actually applied TO the courts TO epjcn my
and public measures hampercd nowadays; but it's
not TO be wondered al, after all. Tho name is not
boards IN South Carolina, Florida ana louisiana" II
have nothing to do with thcm. but confess they
afforded The HINT upon which this Board WAS organ.
with Christmas boxes They count the votes while
number the stockings. Their arguments are based on
w whs. ! like abou, them Isl IS The completeness
Of their organization, their secresy and their
S,sn''SH Soys tx. H.y.. ''%Si asa wnsss S
afraid you are prcjudiced said tho reporter ronee
vs sn H.yss nai se d9 aSe yer Of a
ing family, while Tden is crusty old bachelor
have for who hasn't house full OF chill
drsn. In my visits TO night as Chairman Of the
Christmas Returning Board don't mean even to look
n Governor Tidens chimney whiic shall huri down
that OF Governor Hayes neat toy model OF the White
House for his Oldest boy Il Is neat Toy, can tell
you and honest Zach Chandler is standing in the door
welcome President HayoS" "Presidcnt
Hayes hanged" answered the reporter; Presidens
Tiiden 10 tho ing man" mot unless ne gets
ried. But, now, really you must excuse me. have
great deal OF work do. You may tell the HERALD
that Santa Klaus Returning Board will report TO-
sighI" The Saint then picked up the reporter and
dropped him from the chimney 10 the roof Of the hon
house on the new County Court House.
WHAT REPORTER SAW.
Brief and unsatisfactory was tnis interview the
reporter learned enough TO show that in spite
ol the hard tmes the Christmas returns Will be rs com
pete every way in other years, thstandina
the opposition Of the Scrooae party. Tackieton
the toymaker, has invented 100 new designs Tor she
year Of grace 1876 Hc havc been especially
imbusd with the spirit Of the American Centennial,
and
The old Contrentals
In their ragged regimentals
march and countcrmarch with all tho courage which
WAS shown when
The oid-fasbioned colonel
Galoped through the white, internal
powde mo