The Lake County star. [volume] (Chase, Mich.) 1873-current, 1876-01-27
TRUTHS AND TRIPLES.
MATCHLEss misery-Having cigar,
and nothing to light it with.


and nothing to light it with.
Go forth in haste, with bills and paste;
Proclaim 10 all creation:
The men wise who advertise
In the present generation.
PoUGHKEEPsIE, according to the Press
of that city, is the home of woman so
cross-eyed that when she weeps tears
from her left eye they drop on her right
cheek.
The Rev. III. III. Murray has an article
in the Golden Rule advocating lying in
bed in the morning, burt there seems to be
no particular necessity for us to paste it in
our hat
eco out, young man; she's not here"
said Pennsylvania preacher, last Sun
day, in the middle of his sermon, to a
youth whom he saw standing hesitatingly
in the doorway.
The meanest man lives in Georgia.
He borrowed horse to tend a farm and
after the crop was in he had the cheek to
charge the owner for what his horse had
eaten while in his possession.
A YOUNG woman of Pekin, ILL.,, was
asked by her minister if her husband
feared the Lord. She replied, Gear
him Bless you he is so afraid of him
that he never goes out of Sunday with
out taking his gun along"
OUTSIDE of the nursery, the beginning
of literature is the prayers of the people,
and they are always hymns, poetic-the
mind allowing itself range, and there
with is ever a corresponding freedom in
the style which becomes lyrical.
BEHOLD an idle tale they tell,
And who shall blame their telling 1t?
The rogues have got their cant to sell,
The world pays well for selling 1t.
They say this worlds desert drear,
Still plagued with Egypts blindness;
That we are sent to suffer here
What! by God Of kindness?
That since the world has gone astray,
IL must be so forever,
And we should stand still land obey
It's de- OlateAess-neverl
Well labor for the better time
With all our might OF press and pen;
Believe me, tits truth sublime,
Gods world Is worthy better men.
Gerald Massey.
AS Boston street car was rapidly
passing West street the other afternoon,
a fashionably dressed young man step
ped out upon the platform with the re-
mark: Nevah mind, conductahl don't
stop! Pm an old hand at riding on cahs!"
And he gracefully swung his left leg of
the step and took seat on the curb.
He had made hearty meal at res
taurant, and, rising up, he said to the
cashier: 4" l declare, if 1 haven't forgotten
my wallet" The cashier fired up, and
hurled big words at him for full three
minutes before pausing for breath. When
chance came the stranger continued
4" But Ihave fifty dollars here in my vest
pocket" The cashier couldn't smile to
save him.
THE strides of science are truly won
derful.' A German physician is now sue
cessfufly'treating phthisic, or pulmonary
consumption, by making an incisiOn
through the wall Of the chest, and draw
ing off the pus with a syringe, and after
ward washing out the ulcers with weak
carbolic acid. We may live to see the
day when broken hearted individuals
will be relived of their fractured organs
and, gutta percha ones inserted in their
"IsAY, Higgins" said fellow to an
aspiring but as yet unappreciated TRACE
dian. 1 met rich old gentleman in the
city who declared he would give 500 to
see you perform Hamlet" You
don't say -soT' "FactvI assure you;
and, what's more, Pm positively sure
the old chap meantit." q BY Jove, then,
its bargain |" Higgins cried !; "I'll play
it for my benefit. But who is heT
'Ah! to be sure,I forgot to tell you.
Well, he'sa blind man." Higgins never
spoke to the wretch again. -
MARQUETTE Mining Journal: Show us
man without a cent, who never had a
cent. and never expects to have q cent /;
who owes everybody and is willing to
owe more; fellow who meets his
mother-in-law at the depot with smile,
and tells her he hopes she is going to stay
all winter who kisses his wife when she
informs him the -four barrel is empty,
the sugar all gone,, and John, while
you're about it, order some more pota-
toes" Show us this man and we'll show
you a f-philosopher 1--WE came near
spelling philosopher with an 'fo.