, 1876-04-07
Notifications Extraordinary.

forth-"The persons hereunder men
toned are not allowed to enter: 1. Men
in working-clothes; 2. Women without
bonnets; 3. Servants without their mas
tiers or mistresses; 4. Children without
their parents; 5. Wives without their
husbands; 6. Dogs without their muz-
zles." Somebody blundered, but that
somebody has the consolation of know
ing officials of the new regime are just as
fallible. When the Prefect of Lyons de-
creed that cafes and wine shops must
close their doors at halfpast eleven, he
thought it necessary to warn all persons
CHANGING to be in such places at that
time of night that they must leave with
out being compelled to do so. His
brother of Grenoble capped this by an
nouncing-No burial without religious
rites would be permitted except with the
expressed wish of the deceased-display
ing as much consideration for the de-
funct as the officials of the War Depart
ment did in ordering that, "whenever a
soldier on half pay shall die, or whenever
soldier shall be placed upon half-pay,
he shall be informed of it by the War
Minister" Impracticable rules are easily
made; it is not so easy to make a regu-
lation defying evasion, a feat accom-
plished by the authorities of Denver,
when they notified all travellers over the
town-bridge that mo vehicle, drawn Ny
more than one animal, is allowed to cross
this bridge in opposite directions at the
same time"
A clerical landowner, finding his war
rens were poached while he preached,
sought to insure his game quiet Sun
day by warning offenders in this wise:
"Remember the Sabbath to keep it holy.
Beware, my friends; your names are all
known. If you tresspass on these fields,
or touch my rabbits, you will be prose-
cuted according to the law" The rev.
erend rabbit preserver was not inclined to
make nice distinctions like the turnip-
grower, who politely intimated: Ladies'
and gentlemen are requested not to steal
the turnips; other persons, if detected,
will be prosecuted" And he might have
taken a lesson in liberality from a gentle
man who put up board inscribed, "Ten
shillings reward Any person found
tresspassing on these lands or damaging
these fences, on conviction, will receive
the above reward.n 1t may be ques-
toned if he would have been as true to his
word as the Aberdeen factor who was
wont to jog the memory of laggard
tenant WITH
"To avoid all proceedings unpleasant,
beg you will pay what is due;
II you do, you will oblige me at present;
II you DON'T why, I'll obllge YOU"
No writer of stories with purpose
ever succeeded so thoroughly as Foote,
when he invented his tale of the Grand
Panjandrum for Macklin's discontinue,
which remains unsurpassed as a piece of
pure nonsense; but a Lahore hotel
keepers notice to his customers would
serve equally we'll as a mnenomic test,
for we might safely "bet our pile" against
any of the patrons finding place in
their memory for such a wondrous ex-
ample of English composition as this /:
Gentlemen who come in hotel not say
anything about tAeiF- meals they will be
charged for, and if they should say be-
forehand that they are going out to
breakfast or dinner, etc., and if they say
that they have not anything to eat, they
will be charged, and If not so, they will
be charged, or unless they bring it to the
notice of the manager of the place; and
should they want to say anything, they
must order the manager for, and not any
one else, and unless they not bring it to
the notice of the manager, they will
charge for the least things according to
the hotel rate, and no fuss will be al
lowed afterward about it. Should any
gentleman take wall-lamp or candle
light from the public rooms, they must
pay for it without any dispute its charges.
Monthly gentlemen will have to pay my
fixed rate made with them at the time,
and should they absent day in the
month, they will not be allowed to de-
duct anything out of it, because 1 take
from them less rate than my usual rate
of monthly charges"
Not long ago, the girls of a Maine
factory, rather than submit to reduc-
tion Of wages, gave the mill owners q
months notice, and at the same time is
sued notice to the public in general,
and the masculine public in particular,
in these words: 1--WE are now working
out our notice; can turn our hands to
most anything; don't like to be idle, but
determined not to work for nothing
when folks can afford to pay. Who
wants help1 We can make bonnets,
dresses, puddings, pies; knit, roast, stew,
and fry; make butter and cheese, milk
cows and feed chickens, hoe corn, sweep
out the kitchen, put the parlor to rights,
make beds, split wood, kindle fires, wash
and iron, besides being remarkably fond
OF babies; 10 fact, can do almost any
thing the accomplished housewife il
capable of doing,not forgetting the scold-
ings on Mondays or Saturdays. For
specimens of our spirit wen refer you to
our overseers. Speak quick Black eyes,
fair forehead, clustering locks, beautiful
as Hebe; can sing like seraph, and
smile most bewitchingly. An elderly
gentleman, who wants a good house
keeper, or a nice young man in want Of a
wife-willing to sustain either character
in fact, we are in the market. Who
bids3 Gone, gone, gonel Who's the
lucky mani" If these Maine girls be
ordinary samples of the American factory
girls, no wonder Sam Sticks friend put
q notice over his gate at Lowell: aNo
cigars or Irishmen admitted within these
walls" and pleaded in justification that
"the one would set the flames a going,
among the cottons, and the other among
the gals. All The Year Round.
A NEW SPECIES OF WHALE.-The dis
covery of new species of Ziphioid
whales is announced in Nature. A shoal
Of twentY-eight strange ceteceans was