The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1876-05-03

Be founomote CHILL anofdtau ". MN 1nAn I.
4 Swear you,u never, never tell him |
Warm red roees Hfing your ahy faces to Che
| summer dew; - -: .sey
/ II he win me, a.".s s."-s >;a .iy'
.' Blush your sweesest In his sdgbt s5i1
For bis delight, ,.'.|.,'..-:'.i
But can be as sweet, as sweet as you
j Items Of Interest. n. 90 (
! Motto for Hthe Arabs Up and Be
douin. -. r. )
An empty pocket isrnoIdgnr rof an
empty head. -
4 A man must take the chances II he caa
| find them. D.'.,2> ~, 'Fs2 -
4 Look out for drunken, pigs when ale
comes in hogsheads. - q.
j Justice is heavy when il takes twelve
men to bring in q verdics. $50.
| The fe.st at Port Royal is going to
thoroughly test Georgia coal.
i The patient printerswho wait for their
pay may be called Job printers. n
! England has spent 81, ,0O0, ,OO0, 600 on
her navy within the last eighteen years.
| Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe made 81 =
1 800 from 'har;orange grove IN Floride,
| Last summer. f'zf J. ai't51ss n 1:si s1s't q
! Thirty-seyen companies on the Kenne-
| bec river, Me-, have housed 6OO, 200 tons
| of ice. ..-..aa ~ i, 80. lss 4, /,
/ A hopeless case-The full-grown.
Young man who calls his mother his
NAV and bis father his paw. gyt
The Norwich town cIock has stopped
and the hands are thrown out OF en-
ployment, the Bulletin saya.
| A single vessel left Mobile q few days
] ago en- route TO Liverpool with {, 6,2S7
bales of cotton worth $4l1, 405. :
There is economy in travelling on, the
fast mail trains. You make what you
eat 90 great deal further in given
length Of time. ,'sg
The cost Of the st. Louis whisky trials
| was $65, ,684S5. The result: Two men
| in Jail, and two men convicted, not sen.
tenced and at liberty. .....s ~.
Messrs. Moore & Copestake, of Lon
don, have divided s35, 900, or $175, 600,
among their employeesin proportion to
the length Of their service.
ooh, why does the white man follow
my path 2" asks Lo. Why, to establish
post traderships, Of course, and sell you
poor whisky q. So quart. 80
It is very convenient just now to
brush up the acquaintance OF all your
Philadelphia friends. They will no
doubt be pleased to see you.
Stephen Palmer, a sexton at Goleshill.
England, was inferred and smothered
by the caving in Of one side OF the grave
that be was engaged in excayating. a
The Chicago Times wants to know II
"we fellows whose grandfathers fought
in the Revolution ara not going 70
have our expenses paid to the Centen-
uiali -. ..-@ off.:
One of the leading dentists Of New
York gets from $40 to $3.50 for filing .
tooth, and for cleaning and filing set
of teeth he has been paid as much as
$4,000. $40. ~
The momentous question-Augustus:
"Now, Emily, do you love me, or do
Won not9" Emily" Well, if I say 1
don't, shall I have to return your pre-
sents ~ ~. '#a
Alazy fellow falling q distanceo OF fifty
feet and escaping with. only . few
scratches, bystander remarked that ne
was "too slow to fall fast enough to
hurt himself" - ,.iIi:
"About this time look ont for colds.
But it is not necessary. The man who
cannot catch cold without looking out
for It hasn't enterprise enough to sneeze
If he should catch one. -. '
"Mamma, don't you want some nice
candy7" said shrewd little child:
eyes, dear, I should like some.
saThen, il you bay some, I'll give You
half I" lisped the politic girl 30 49,,
| Little do the boys imagine that while
thew are attending school and striving
to store their minds with useful imor-
nation, bold, bad men in New York are
raising the price of frecrackers. s>@s
In former days, when q Chinaman was
pushed into the mud bya San Francisco
| hoodlum, he would say: "Yon Chris
tian, me heathen; goodbye. Now
John cracks back with slungshot, and
the sport seems to be passing away.
A minister at Neenah, Wis, has re-
tired from the pulpit and established
himself on farm some miles distant
from the town, where he advertises, IN
the village paper, marriages will be
| speedily performed at all hours.
"My poem is rather lengthy" she
said, Sand may be you won't have room
for it this week." The editor yawned
and replied "Oh, yes, we could find
room for it if it was twelve times as long
Our stove is large one, You see"
He is seated at table alta restaurant.
Before him is an immense plate of pam
cakes, cit is singular" he muses.,
"they say appetite comes with eating.
Two cakes, no appetite three, four,
five, six, still no appetite. Decidedly,
I'm very siok." ,... ,-a.~jf ,,..o.,.,
Robert Williams, San old white
man." stole q mackerel worth sixteen
cents in Richmond, the other day. and
received as punishment six lashes and
one hours imprisonment. The confne-
ment cost the State ninety cents. -
A school speaker used the word
abridgemept, :Jbut Immediately pulled
mn and remarked that as some OF ths
younger scholars might not know its
meaning he would say that it was 9
synonym of epitome. The members ,os
the infant class were affected to tears.
A lawyer in California court had q
dispute with the Judge on law point,
and the Judge made out commitment
against the lawyer for twenty.four hours
in the county Jail for contempt. Inc
constable was averse to serving the
papers, so the lawyer took himself nnaer
arrest, went to jail, got out, within an
hour on writ of habeas corpus, ana
sued the Judge for damages. a.= .
In England, marriage with deceased
wife's sister is still illegal, whereas tne
colonial legislatures of Australia nave
sanctioned it, and the respective enae'. @ .
ments received the royal assent. lne
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