davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17
TOnSOriaI Art and Artists.

1t is amusing to find one of those ira
ditional jokes which everybody reveres
becoming reality. There, for instance,
is the story of the rivalry between two
BARRIERS in an English town who kept
reducing their prices until one of them
offered 10 shave his customers for moth
ing. The other, not to be outdOne, put
up sign in these words, "What do you
think? I'll shave yor for nothing and
give you drink" Some of the BARRIERS
of New York have determined to make
their prices for shaving 8 cents. Others,
afraid of the loss of custom, have not
only reduced their prices to cents, but
for this insignificant sum offer ga good
shave and good cigar" ga good shave
and glass Of beer" and one atrocious
barber even announces ga good shave
and schooner Of beer" AS a general
thing we are in favor of reduction in
prices. But the bar oers' method is very
like cruelty TO animals. The man who
smokes cigars or drinks beer thereby
obtains decided advantage over the
man who does neither but it must be
confessed he runs greater risk. In a
barber shop where you are shaved and
receive a cigar it would be bad enough
to be compelled TO inhale the poisonous
atmosphere, to say nothing of the stran-
gulation and expectoration that would
follow smoking one Of the weeds. Then
we are afraid that the beer also, espe-
cially in the schooner establishment,
would be as dangerous almost as cup
of poison. Apart from all these risks,
it is well known from the traditional an
ecdote that BARRIERS always punctuate in
their heads, and that the famous sign
should have read: "Whatl Do you
think I'll shave you for nothing and give
you drinl 2" We trust that nobody
else will do anything so utterly absurd
Even the barber is worthy of his hire,
and 10 cents is little enough for shave
nowadays, especially when we consider
a tonsorial artists manifold duties to his
customer. 1t is expected of him that
he will talk his subject so nearly to death
that he lives AS if by miracle that his
up-strokes shall threaten his customers
nose and his down strokes his ear with
out touching them that he shall care
fully scan the beard SO as always to go
"against the grain," and that by all the
means in his power he shall minister to
the discomfort of the poor wretch in his
hands. Ten cents is little enough for
such desperate operation, and it is idle
to talk of cigar or schooner OF beer
In such a case.-Ne,O York Herald.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17
CANNES Meek In SpiIit.

An Omaha livery-stable keeper owned
a fine lot of coach dogs. These dogs are
white, with black spots all over them,
and are noted for their docile, not 10 say
cowardly, dispositions. The dogs be-
longing to the livery stable keeper were
beset on all occasions by the other dogs
in the streets, and, as they were meek in
spirit, were as easily overcome as lot OF
sheep The livery stable man stood this.
as long as he could, when, one day, he
found large, white bulldog, and it i'm
mediately occurred to him what to do.
He bought that dog, took him to his
stable, and there kept him until he got
thoroughly acquainted with the coach
dogs. The bulldog was then sent to
the BARRIERS shop, and black spots were
neatly painted or dyed all over him, so
that he looked like veritable coach
dog, with a somewhat short nose and
elongated lower jaw. The next time the
carriage was sent out this model coach
dog went along, and the street dogs
event for him." thinking they would
have their usual sport and victory but
in this they were mistaken the bull
dog waded in, and the way the hair,
guitar strings and sausage-meat flew was
a caution. Since that time the coach
dogs have been let alone.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17
A SOldier of Fortune.

Henry Islop McIvar, native of Edin-
burgh, is leader in the Servian army.
He has fought on four continents in
twenty years, and almost always on the
side of the smallest numbers. He gained
a medal in the Indian mutiny, fought
under Garibaldi in 1859, under Lee in
1861, for the Mexicans after the rebel
lion, with little Indian skirmishing in
Texas. He was in the Cretan rebellion,
served in Greece against the brigands,
was in the patriot army in Cuba for a
while, and then had a cavalry command
in Egypt. He fought in France under
Faldherbe against the Germans, turned
up in Paris as a Communist, went to
Herzegovina as correspondent of Lon
don paper, and is now leader of
Servian irregnlars.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17

of visitors thought that the bare boards.
with their daily coat of yellow sand. had
been characteristic of the house from tine
hour of It's birth. There are few now
living to remember the first and most
famous of Iimmer's walters, whose name
is perpetnated on both sides of the At
lantic bya still favorite drink, in which
gin, soda water, ice. lemon and sugar
are the constituent elements. My name
is John Collins, sang the gay youth of a
bygone age, head waiter Mt Limmer's,
corner of Conduit street, Hanover
square; my chief occupation is filling of
brimmers Tor oil the young gentlemen
frequenters there 1t was to his vigilant
and Characteristic prudence that some
of his young clients owed the possession
of "a loophole of retreat, which enabled
them to escape without passing through
the easily-watched portal. 1t was not
unknown to poor Jack Mytton, with
whom many of the most racy stories sug-
gested 10y the historic iaedite of the
world famous tavern will long be asso-
ciated. There stands the table upon
which he mounted, seemingly three
sheets in the wind, in order to lay
against the winner of the Two Thousand,
Sir Tatton Sykes, for the Derby. When
his credit was exhausted and the backers
accepted his offers to as large an extent
as they thought it possible he could pay,
he ran upstairs to his bed room and re
turned with several thousand pound
notes in his hand, which he proceeded
TO lay on what he called ready-money
principles. 81 was not quite 80 drunk
as they thought, was his explanation to
friend who questioned hin about his
proceedings on the eve of the race. The
ponderous frame of Capt. Sutherland of
the Twelfth Lancers, is recalled by the
armchair which was specially built for
him, and in which he boosted that he
was 27 years old and weighed twenty
seven stone. The tavern which, as a
guest-house, mas probably run its earth
ly course, and of which, before many
moons have rolled away, there will be
nothing but memories left, occupies a
space in the West-End life of London,
which no other building in the metrop-
oils can so adequately fill. Its three
Prince Of Wales feathers, with their con-
comitant 'Ich Diem, link us with the
voluptuous days of the Prince Regent
Lin,mer's was to our fathers and grand
fathers what the Turf Club, the Road
Club, Pratts, the Victoria, and the Al
bert are to sporting men of to-day"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17
A Fatal COOn-Hunt.

We learn that several negroes started
ont to hunt coons near Harrodsburg, in
Mercer county, KY, one night last week.
A quarrel arose between two of the ne
groes in the woods, when one was shot
and killed. His friends remained and
took charge of the body, while the rest
of the crowd proceeded with the hunt.
A little later one of the negroes climbed
tree to shake down a coon. The negro
fell and was instantly killed. The coon
fell among the dogs and terrible fight
ensued. In attempting to separate coon
and dogs another negro had his leg lit
orally torn to pieces by dog. He then
killed the dog. The coon next sue
cumbed to fate, and his death ends the
list of casualties during that coon hunt.
The murderer has been apprehended.-
Midway Sun.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17
house. where * S pSJs i qsMss ready, by
meaisof sosp and water and sbrokenI

house, where he made himself ready, by
meaiisof soap and water and p broken
comb, 70, walk Ave miles into the sub
urbs, and get a sight, if only for Ave
minutes, of his mother.
On the following Monday, Bert, having
leisure hour, went 10 call on his ne
acquaintance in Devonshire street.
Having climbed the two flights, he
found the door of the back room ut the
right ajar, and, looking in, saw Mr..
Crooker at desk, in the act of receiving
a roll of money from well-dressed
visitor.
Bert entered unnotced, and waited
till the money vas counted and receip,
signed. Then, as the visitor departed,
old Mr.. Croker looked round and saw
Bert. He offered him a chair; then
turned to lock up the money i'll a safe,
$50 this is your place of business z
said Bert, plancing about the plain Office
room. "Whit do you do here2"
81 buy real estate, sometimes-sell-
rent-and 80 forth"
"Who for2" asked Bert.
"For myself" said little old Mr..
Croker, with a smile. &
Bert stared, perfectly aghast, at this
situation. This, then, was the man
whom he had invited to dinner and
treated so patronizingly the preceding
Thursday
I'll thought you was poor
man."
81 am poor man," said Mr.. Crocker,
locking his safe. Money don't make @
man rich. I've money enough. / own
houses in the city. They give me some
thing to think of, and SO keep me alive.
/ had truer riches olce, but 1 lost them
long ago."
From the way the old mans voice
trembled and eyes glistened, Bert
thought he must have meant by these
riches friends he had lost-wife and
children, perhaps.
"To think of me inviting you to
dinner !" he cried, abashed and
ashamed.
ait aOas odd |" And Mr.. Croker
showed his white front teeth with q
smile. But it may turn out to have
been lucky circumstance for both of
us. like you. / believe in you, and
I've an offer to make you. want a
trusty, bright boy in this office-some-
body can bring up to my business,
and leave it with, as / get too old to at
tend to it myself. What do you say ~"
What could Bert say2
Again that afternoon he walked-or
rather ran-to his mother and, after
consulting with her, ioyfully accepted
Mr.. Crooker's offer.
Interviews between his mother and
his employer soon followed, resulting in
something for which at first the boy had
not dared 20 hope. The lonely, child
less old man, who owned SO many
houses, wanted a home and one OF
these houses he offered to Mrs. Hamp.
ton, with ample support Tor herself and
children, if she would also make it O
home for him.
OF course this proposition was ac-
cepted and Bert soon had the satisfac-
ton of seeing the great ambition of his
life accomplished. He had employ
ment, which promised to become q
profitable business Gas indeed it did in o
few years, he and the old man proved &c
useful to each other) and, more than
that, he was united once more with his
mother and sisters in happy home,
where he has since had good many
Thanksgiving dinners.-L T. Troa0-
br2dge.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17

A DOG, near Norfolk, Va, was Taught
to wait every day for railroad train,
catch newspaper thrown out by the
baggage master, and carry it home. His
master died several months ago, but he
goes every day to get the newspaper,
and gazes after the cars in apparent dis
appointment when nothing Is thrown to
him.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17

THE pumpkin returns are coming in.
john Lehr, of York township, Pa, re-
ports having raised one weighing seven
ty-six pounds, which California farmer
eclipses with one which turns the beam
at 1921 pounds.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-11-17

The Caucasian is "played out" in
indianapolis. Says the Sentinel: "On
the Circle yesterday white man
knocked a Chinaman down for some
real or fancied grievance, and the eternal
fitness of things was illustrated by the
promptness with which negro police
man arrested and took the assaulter to
the station house."
The number of convictions for MUIR
der in England has been greater in 1875
than in any preceding year, the exact
figures being, since 1870, respectively,
A, 80, 60, and So. Shooting, wound
ing, and stabbing have also increased,
the number of convictions last year
having been 397. Crimes against prop
erty, and pauperism are, however,
steadily decreasing.
, 1876-12-23

VaLUE OF BooRs.-So precious were
books in the Dark Ages that donations
Of them are recorded as acts Of signal
generosity, deserving perpetual renem-
berance. In 800 the King Of Northum-
berland gaye600 acres OF land for one book
containing the history of the world. A
countess OF Anjou gave 200 sheep and a
large parcel of rich furs for volume OF
hOmilies 100 crowns were given for a
single book OF Livy; 100 crowns of gold
for Concordance, and 40 crowns for a
satirical poem called the Romance OF
the rose" In 1420, Latin Bible was
valued at $50 at time when two arches
of London Bridge were built for less
money at o time, too, when the W lges
Of A laIIorer were three. .halfpencc day,
and when, of course, it would have cost
such a man fifteen years OF hard labor to
buy Bible, which, after all, being in
Latin, he could have not read.
, 1876-12-23

PRESIDENTIAL NEws.--The very latest
Cby the grapevine telcgraph). The fol.
lowing dispatch is somewhat "mixed'
but is up to the standard;
The --latest Rutherford B. Tilden is in
result and Samuel J. Hayes growing fe-
yer of receipt chaos in Tallahassee.
Democrats claim large Florida than re.
suit of doubt. Both parties Carolina
claimed by South. MajoriIies insist in
adverse and Louisiana refuse concede both
parties uncertainty Samuel ]. Rutherford.
Rutherford B. Tilden fixes majority Re-
publican ot Louisiana where bloody
precint threatened unregistered resistance
it the throw out iIlegals are votes. The
Democrats are Republicans and the des-
pondent, confident Thus may the huct-
uating adherents of the hopes of the pass
ing hour remain and the great event un-
certain. Neither the partisans of Ruther-
ford B. Tilden or Samuel j. Hayes are
willing to defeat admit.-Iaaho Aoat-
,anche.
, 1876-12-23

At a station on the New Haven road,
the other day, man and woman came
into the car. Every seat had one or two
occupants. He put her into one seat,
which was in part occupied, and he took
another just opposite. The party whom
he sat with offered to sit elsewhere so
that he and his lady might have that
seat together. "Oh, it does not matter"
he replied, "we are married." The cX.
planntion was considered satisfactory
DaHbvry Ne,rs.
, 1876-12-23

The Bishop of Northern Texas, judg-
ing by his remarks at the late Church
Congress in Boston, must have had a
severe experience: "In the course of his
address the Bishop illustrated the need
ot varying the methods of preaching by
asking what was to be done when, in
such aplace as Texas, you met man
with his belt stuck full of pistols and
carrying Winches ter rifle, who stops
you AMI asks, What kind of man are
you p and on being told that you are IA
preacher asks you ii you ever preached
from the text, Go ye into all the world
and preach the gospel to every creature.
He that believcth and is baptised shall
be saved, but lie that beIieveth not shall
be damned. And these signs shall fol.
low them that believe. In my name
shall they cast out devils; they shall
speak with new tongues; they shall take
up scrpents, and if they drink any dead.
ly thing it shall not hurt them You
say yes, you have Undoubtedly done
such thing. The man asks you if you
believe it, and you answer that you
would not preach it if you did not be-
lieve it, whereupon he says he wants to
test n few of your pet converts with
rrsenic. The Bishop dryIy remarked
that, under such circumstances, there
wa' great need of elastic power in the
adaptation Of the service to the wants
OF the people,
, 1876-12-23
The official Vote Of Oregon.

The official canvas was made on Mon
,lnv, Dec. 4th, at the city Of Salem, hy
the Governor and Secretary of State, in
the presence of large usscmhlagc ofpco.
pie. resulted as follows:
Elcctors-C cartwright, lS,2l4 ; Watts,
15.2O6 Odcll 1j,2OG Cronin, l4,l55 ;
Lasswcll, 14,140; KlippelI, l4,l36
Suthcrmn, 80 Clark, 500 Curl, 5O1 ;
scattering, 4.
Congress 49, Williams, lj,347; Lane,
14,22O: scattering, s.
At the close OF the canvass the Gov
crnor snil. in the matter of the election
of member of Congress, certificate
would issue upon the canvass to Richard
Williams. In the matter OF the electors,
protest had been filed in the office of
the Executive against the issuance ot a
certificate to Watts As an elector, copies
of which could be procured of the Sccre-
ItTV Nv lllDSC llltlCNNN''' "iO N'''' NV
other papers before halt-post D Tuesday
morning. The protest raised grave
questions as to jurisdiction and the law,
and as the certificate need not issue till
Wednesday, the 9th, meantime the qucs'
tion could he investigated and argued.
The board then adjourned till 10 A. Nj.
Tuesday.
The protest referred to sets forth that
Watts is ineligible, having been post
master at Lafayette on the day of cleo
tion, and instructs the Governor that his
duty is to issue certificates to the three
qualified candidates having the highest
number of votes. 1t was filed December
cd and is signed by number of promi'
nent Democrats. Counter statements
were filed and the matter argued before
the Governor on Tuesday and Wednes
day.
, 1876-12-23

Members Of LegiSiatwe-Co Council.
Wala Walla-Dan Stewart.
Columbia, Whitman and Stevens
Elisha Ping.
Clark, Skamania, Klickitat and Yaki.
MAN. r. Hathaway.
Cowlitz, Pacific and Wahkiakum-C.
A. Reed.
Thurston and Lewis-T, NJ. Reed.
Pierce, Mason and Chehnlis-Jacob
Hoover
King-C. II. Hanford.
Kitsap, Snohomish and Whatcom-E.
G. Ferguson.
jeff rson, Clalam, Island and San Juan
j. A. Kuhn.
House.
stevens-Henry Wellington.
Whitmun-L. NJ Ringer.
Walla Walla-W. 7. Burns, W. Mar
tin, A. j. Gregory, N. Van syce,
Yakima-Edward Whitson.
Cowlitz--J. b. La Due.
COwlitz and Wahklacum-N. Davis.
Clarke VIM. B. Daniels, G. T. Stiles.
Columbia--R G. Newland, Edward
Mcdonnell.
Clarke, Skamania and Klickitat-N.
Whitney.
Lewis-J. H. Long.
Thurston-J. G. Horr, Sam. G. Ward,
John Chipman.
Pacific and Chehallis-Thos. Warman.
Pierce-Wm. b. Kelley.
Pierce and Mason--John McResvey.
King-G. Tibbetts, Joe Foster.
Snohomish--O. B. Iverson.
Kitsap-A. s. Miller.
Kitsap aud Jefferson--Wm. Korter.
Jcfferson-John NJ. Z. Atkinson.
Whatcom--L. L. Andrews.
Clalam and San Juan-Tie; no election.
Island-Eason b. Ebey
NoTE.--Names with \ are Democrats, cx.
eept members Of the Council and House. The
Council stands 5Repubcans, 4 Democrats I;
House, lBRepnhIcans, Is Democrats. There
being tie vote In Italian and San Juan coun-
ties asuecihl election will have to be held
, 1876-12-23

Doesn't man contract debt when
he pays part of it.
A gentle lady alluded to her female
ancestor as Lady Eve nee Rib.
An Irish lover remarks that it is a
great comfort to be alone, especially if
yer sweetheart is wild ye."
The King of Greece is writing book
on bees,-Er. All write, honey, it will
CELL
, 1876-12-23

Miss Martineau's "Socirtv in America"
contains many good s'ories. Among
them are the following: "a lecturer dis
codrsing on the characteristics Of woman
is said to have expressed himself thus ::
Who were last Mt the CROSSE Ladies'.
Who were first ut the sepulchre La
dies An epitaph on negro baby at
Savannah begins, Sweet bIighted lily !"
, 1876-12-23

HOTEL CHANGE.-On the 1st of .Janu.
ary, 1877, Messrs, Wiggin & Fox, now
of the American Hotel. will take charge
OF the Occidental Hotel, under a three
years lease Of the house and all its fix
lures and furniture The American
Hotel business, furniture, etc, they have
sold to Messrs, Haley & Knipe, now of
the spring bed factory known by their
firm name, who will assume its charge
the same day that Wiggin & Fox do
that of the Occidcntal.-Smttb Tribune.
, 1876-12-23

ADVERTISEMENT Missing from Kill
larney, Lane O'Fogerty. She had in her
arms two babies and Guernsey COW,
all black, with red hair, and tortoise
shell comb behind her ears, and large
black spots all down her back, which
squints awtully.
, 1876-12-23

The Connecticut fossil footprints ap-
pear to be bogus. 1t is hard to be Ger
tain about anything after the lapse of
centuries. No doubt the future antigua.
rian, as he digs about in the ruins of an
cicnt Chicago, will, finding the fossil
footprint of belle, mistake it for bath;
tub hewn in stone and write book
thereon.
, 1876-12-23

There is charm of eye and lip which
comes with every little phrase, that Ger.
titles delicate perception or fine judg-
ment; with every unostentatious word
or smile, that shows heart awake to
others; and no sweep of garment or turn
of figure is more satisfying than that
which enters as restoration of conf
dence that one is present on whom no
intention will be lost r. George Eliot.
, 1876-12-23

NoTE.-Names with are Democrats, OK.
eept members Of the Council and House. The
Council stands 5 Republicans, Democrats
House, lGRepnhIicans, Is Democrats. There
being tie vote In Ilalam and San Juan coun.
ties suecial election will have to be held
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1876-09-13


ACKER-suddenly. at the residence OF her son.ln
law, C. r.. Guild gag 81 ay Eleanor WIDOW Of Abraham
Acker In the Slst year OF her
Services on Wednesday, Sept 10, at +. NJ. Her TO
DORIS - Eriza Doris, will be buried from her att
residence lls Myrtle av- Brooklyn, TINS Gay tN ednes
Il ienas Of Tho family are respectfully invited.
HANRAIAN.-On Tuesday, Sept. L. Mary CeAry
the beloved wife Of James hanrahan OF CAshel aged
years. - .,., -. $780,, a..
funeral from her late residence 10 Roosevelt ST. OF
lhursiay, at ociuck To CAVIAR, Cemetery. .
HUksT.-Suddenlt. IN -. Louis, Sept. 10, MARY l.
Mnlaer, wife Of Charles Hurst.
Notice OF funeral tomorrow. - 49,,
KINNALLY.-on Tuesday. 18Th inst, Jamei kinnal
ly, aeca % year, 1900 ..o., . 49,
Funeral # m his late residence 10 Last l2th ST. Oh
1hurslIy, al o'cluck J.. NJ. - .-.,,,. -, a,
KELLN.-A solemn requiem mass monihs nina
vii be on red ~ Tue repose % ne soul oi the lAt
ceptiOn l4th ST. near A, on Friday l5th inst, al
o. NJ Relatives and frienue are invlted t. assist,
LElIH.-On Tucsday sept H. George 5. Lenh
printer. aged Is years.
N0tcc OF funeral hereafter. , ~.
MAhoN.-on Sept. H. Michael j. Mahon' in the $50
'Funtral from his late residence 45e West 80 st.
| specially invited u attend.
REILLY .-OA Tuesday, Sent IL, Margaret iieilley
native 81 the county Longiofd ireland IN the osh veal
Noiice OF funeral rcaitcr
SLEIGHI AT Mount vernon, \. ! o. m MohuAy'
| Sent H. flZtheth. wife OF Capt J Iinet lght
Relatives and friends are invited 20 httth me rune
ra from her late r'sidcnce, on thursday Alernool
/ l3tn inst. Al o. lock. r...,.. ca, ~
! WEI ~ Al Harlem, suddenly. on lursdN. sept y,
1876 IaleD Dros Weeks aged a. ears uiohlAs' anu
rs funeral services wifi he rcd at me residence Of
his brothcr Mr. Benjamin Weeks II" ~s ~ or
friend. are rtspe, fuzzy inv a to attend lhiefmenta al
| MoudlaNu Cemetery.