The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1876-07-01
Gleanings and Gossip.

very nAITO" aperture Inc cIack
OF a whip.
They who weep over errors wero not
formed for crimes.
The South has new order, THE Oricn.
tai Order Of Humility"
Doadheads at the Centennial have nl
ready exceeded 10000 10 number
A spanking turnout-The boy who was
whipped and sent homo from school
An old curmudgeon says that the ladies
have decoration day" every Sunday.
A very greedy boy-One who recently
took the measles from his little sister
The paying admissions to the Centeuni.
al on Decoration day numbered IL, Ill.
Miss Temperance Andrews, of Penn.
sylvania has hair nearly seven feet long.
Harvesting isusually season Of rejoic.
ing, but the onion crop is gathered in
tears.
Two courses for eight cents at Dc.
troit restaursnt--a slice Of bread and
bowl Of water.
Sounds just az loud as new quarter,
chuckles Midas, as he drops a ivecens
nickel into the contribution box.
Giles, can you conjugate behaves ?
Bohaves-behovcs-- behives-be-- See
here, you 90 and stand in the corner
The swell snob OF the season, with bag
gy clothes and shaved head, is not far re-
moved from the Chinaman in appearance.
The Brooklyn Argus says that there is
nothing that will mako woman stand be.
fore her looking.elass so long as a sun.
burnt nose.
Schools to leach girls plain needle
work are proposed. 1t is needless to
say that the success Of such schools will
prove only sew.sew.
In the second week OF March there
were 80, sos paupsrs in London, Of whom
36,9l5 were in workhouses, and 49,903
received outdoor relief.
The Benedictine monks are to estab.
lish monastery at Fort Augustus, In.
vernoss.shre, Scotland, after an absence
of three hundred years.
A bill has been introduced into the
Texas Legislature declaring drunkenness
to be misconduct, and making it pun.
ishable By iine Of sl00.
In Egypt three out OF five children die
before reaching the age of two years,
This is about the rate of mortality among
Presidential candidates this year
Pv schiminy. how thst poy studies de
languages is what 4 delighted elderly
German sai when his iour.year old son
called him blaar eyed son Of say horse,
An OH Ids al Aiiica. Iud, just to
show wha she could to, filed goblet
with rich cream. and with ID teaspoon
churned butter enough for breakfast for
family Of six
The governor OF Texas has issued i
proclamation revokine oil immigration
agencies heretofore established, as tho
new constitution does not recognize any
bureau Of that kind
IF there is anybody under the canis.
ter of heaven that | have 10 utter eycro.
scence, says Mrs. Partington. cit is the
sanderer, going about like hoy con.
slructor, circulating his colonel upon
honest folks
Henry Wellmau rider iu circus,
cruelty whipped hi3 horse in Great Bar.
rington, Mnss, because it would NOT read.
lily learn I trick, lie vas sent to Jail
for six mouths
In Connecticut, last year, there we're
466 divorces to 5,3S5 marriages, with an
average of about $50 divorces year for
the last fifteen years, the prevailing cause
being general misconduct"
10 a certain apothccary Il shop OF Pitts.
burg may be seen a notice recommending
certain patent medicine with the dubi-
Gus heading Try the box; no other
medicine will ever be taken"
When Brigham Young finds that tire
biscuits are burned and the meat over
done he puts on his hat and goes out aud
brings home new wife. This Is c2lcn.
lated 10 make his wives careful.
Iu Exeter, England, policeman waot.
Ell to arrest a girl. but she preferred the
canal to her misery, and jumped lie
leapel after 10 gave her. but she clung fast
10 him, and both were drowned.
The ex x.presidapt of the Conundrum
club perpetrates another atroci Wis /:
What is that which 10 man wants,
I which. if any man has, ho would not part
with for untold wealth ?' A bald head
In l776 you could bny d calico dress
for fifty cents Oh those good old
days Still, Il didut seem half as good
as to sit up with girl with brown silk
on, if we are correct in our reading of
history.
A Western paper announces the illness
OF its editor, piou-ly adding "All good
paying subscribers are requested 10 men
tion him in their rrayer-. The others need
not. as tho prayers Of the wicked avail
nothing
AZ shoS the other evening, q gentle
man sarcastically asked man standing
up in trout Of him il he was aware that he
was opaque. The other denied the al.
legation lie was not opaque. His
name was O'Breu.
DR. SAdE's CArARRm REMEDY is no
pateut medicine humbug, got up to dupe
the ignorant aud c5edulous, nor is It rep.
resented as being composed Of raro and
precious substances brought from the
four corners Of the earth, carried seven
times across the Great Desert Of Sahara
/ an Az L.nl-. r. t,,.koon