The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1876-09-20
exzited-what's the matter? Hope my

| nOgS l1lnC Dcen neaVur your taterS-
hope none of your cattle or horses amt
! sick-hope none of your folks amt
dead 2
! '' Matter enough says Uncle Ike.
/ Somebody's gone and hooked hull
slather of my mush milyons, and I've
tracked them to the Springs. and they
tell me that they bought 'em Of your
toys for 10 cents apiece.
is that SO : says ole Mr.. Tilden.
WALL. II call the boys. I allus learnt
, EN- to be keerful about their repu-
tashuns, and to never do nuthin' that
will be discovered in q way to sile their
good names. My motto is: Take care
OF yer name. and your karacter will sar.
tin take care of ITSELF
''Then he goes out to the barn where
; Nose and Sammy was trying to cheat
each other tradin fish-ines. and talked
with the boys in a low tone and went
back into the house.
! ''When the boys came in lie says
Boys, Uncle Ike has lost q hull slew of
them good milyons Of hisen, and has
! found them at the Springs, and they
tell him that Nose brung EN- there
and sold EN-. What have you got to
say, boys! Ifyou've stole Uncle Ike's
mush nlilyons III lick yer within an
inch Of yer lives.
/ ''Gracions You ought to seen sam
my! lie turned up that round, smirk-
in. one-sided face of hisen. and, look
in Uncle Ike square i'll thu eyes, said:
:'lou're Il nice-ole-uncle' to
come here and tvit Inc an Nose
Of stealth yer sol derned ole
mush milyons. Don't nobody
raise milyons in this town of Leb' non
but Won You ought to be ashamed of
yerseli. Ia like to see ye prove 'em
yourn. what are ye guin to do about
it! say
AZ first Uncle Ike was so TUX down
; by Sammy S sass, that he began to feel
sAeenish like, and WIZ about to beg the
! family's parding and go. when that
last mlsfortunate remark about provin'
j prop ty riltd him agin, and says he:
Sammy, stay on Yer boss jest q mint.
Pr:'ps you kin bluff lie, and praps you
can't. Fraps YOU don't know how t
cut the letter / onto the seed end of
every mUsli nilyon into my garding.
and should know elm in Tophet, where
You'll be most apt to git q lick at sicl
fodder it you are lucky enough to eat
anything as coolin as milvons in the
! future life.
Oh Says Sammy. then You know
they re yo1lrl. And, say. Uncle Ike.
| III glad You Wuz smart enough to cut
the front corner Ct yer fust name
unto them milyons. think | know
the chaps that stole EN-. l told EN-
Sunday arter YOU treated us 50 nice.
steal your milyons, but they didn't
mind what | said.
81: III ashamed Of my seNt. I'm
4 boy. and if the Lord spares my life
I'll never marry and run the risk Of
hTingin' more boys into the world.
but Il devote my life to exposin' sill
ncTs. I've been in the mush milvon
bizniZ a little. and bought and sold
1nilyons more Or less, but who'd
thought I WIZ dickering with a lot of
! thieves! 1tm;lkes my blood bile to
think Of It. But it is lucky for you
and the hull country tibet them mil
yons WIZ sold to me. 1t may be the
! means Of breakin' NJ the all-fredest
mnsh n1ilvon gang that ever cussed the
country. I kin spot every one Of EN-
and bring EN- to justice, though it Il
take time and money, land shall run the
risk Of gittill; licked like thunder, for
the boys'l] be awful mad. But it is
time SOMEBODY begun to bust these
! chaps, or We 're ruined. / ain t afeard
to so ahead if You ain afaard to fol
ler.'
Sammy, says Old Nh. Tilde1l, I
never WIZ so proud OF We :afGre in Ill
my born days. I drutheI you'd steal
all the mush lilyons in the County of
| klunhy than hot git {. chance to be (;
refoImer, You ro the stuff that G1lv'-
ners and Pres dents is made ont on.
Bless ye, my boy
- Sammy says Uncle Ike. with
tears rollin down Lis face. I'm glad
such a brave and honest boy has taken
hold Of this thing; and if you'll tell
me the names Of Tie boys that did the
stealth ye Eee<lnt pay back nuthin on
1he milyons, and l II go s1ucks with We
on the money set outen the boys
dads.
"Wa2], is boys all got all *Hft;]
lick eli. and our fathers paid Ike three
times the worth Of the Irop'ty to have
:, it hushcl w. Sammy cleared about
, fifteen dollars outen the entire con
sacn, md got the name Of bein', the
:, bravest and honestest boy in the hull
, county. and vas mentioned in the mir.
, lister S sarnint the next Sunday.
But Zane here the old man shook,
, his head ana knocked the ashes from
his nine) | don't know about SIGH
doil?s. can't see why the biggest