Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1876-11-16
ITEMS OF INTEREST,

| AhNsiOAo., ..IoOi pay AiiS Ills OWU eli
trance, handed the Centennial gate
keeper three-dollar bill, and turned
the stile around half a dozen times, re-
marking that his six children couldn't
come, but he was representing then
~. 7. Commercial Ad0ertiSer.
A New Hampshire man told sto,
about flock of crows three miles long
and so thick you could not see the sun
through it. "Don't believe it." was
the reply. "Wa'al," said the nara
tor, YOU'RE a stranger, and 1 don't
want to quarrel with you;so, to please
you, I'll take off a quarter of mile in
the thinnest part
THE North Carolina Supreme Court
decides, in State os Johnson, that ga
son IS allowed to fight only in the nee
essary defense Of his father, and to
excuse himself he must plead and
show that his father would have been
beaten had he (the SOM not interfered.
IL father and his adversary are en-
gagged IN a fight on equal terms, the
sons interference is not justifable."
ONE thing makes us envy the lives
OF the old Roman editors. They didn't
have to turn to the back of Webster's
dictionary every time they got con-
trlbution from some occasional CORE
spondent, to find out the correct spell
ing of half dozen old Latin grammar
quotations dragged up from the re-
cesses of memory and spelled by ear
by the scholarly correspondent, as,
"dulsy ct ducorem est per padria NOR
row., and "dumb vivimust viva
NOUS" Happy old Romans. Bur
tsaagtoaa Hoaok-Eye.
A SINFUL New York paper saws:
" a clearinghouse keeper in Chicago
| read how the hotels in the White
Mountains had schoolmistresses and
divinity students for walters, and, to
follow the example, induced a young
man and two female teachers, whose
salaries had been cut down, to under
take waiting at table. The first young
woman was addressed by boarder to
pass them BEANS whereupon she
tainted and spilled plate of soup over
the best false hair and down the back
! of young widow. Her companion,
when called upon for plate of 'pud'n,'
said, kindly, You mean pudding, do
YOU not p"
To THOSE feeling any curiosity as ia
Mr.. Joaquin Miller's latest gigantic
lie, the following may be interesting.
He describes an emigrant train passing
over the prairie and meeting a herd of
buffalo at full speed and moved by one
of the apparently insane impulses
which sometimes seize these animals.
In an instant the immense herd had
passed-there was no wagon, there
were no men, oxen, horses left; even
their bodies were obliterated. The
one survivor was a woman, who was
carried out Of the horrible struggle on
the back of one Of the herd-hoW, she
never knew; her first consciousness
was that she stood in safety upon lit
tie hillock and the whirlWind had
gone by.
JUDGE PHELPS, Of the Covington
County Court, issued a rule, a few
days ago, requiring Mr.. Tony Burns,
executor of Mrs. Mary Kennedy, under
a will probated eight years ago, to APP
ND 10
Yesterday Mr.. Burns appeared at the
office of the County Clerk, and in an
sWer to the rule, presented Mrs.
Burns, the testatrix, herself When
the Judge recovered from his astonish-
ment, he learned that the will had
been probated while Mrs. Kennedy
was lying apparently at the point of
death that Mr. Burns had it probated
before her death, in his anxiety to dis
patch business, and Mrs. Kennedy
subsequently recovered. He was
called on to settle up some years ago,
but made some dilatory motion at that |
time, not being in hurry to reveal |
the ludicrous position he had placed |
himself in.-Cia1ci1aalzti Gazette.
"YEs," remarked an old lady on |
the Western-bound cars, the other |
day, ''me and my old man got lost |
from each other at the Centennial, and |
such time as we did get into! I wan
dered round, and he wandered round, |
till it seemed as though the Cen
tennial and Philadelphia was all
one jumbled mass of craziness. l
tell yer was worked up, and the old |
man says he lost all faith in prayer
and advertisements, after lookin' for
me two days. But at last we came
together-I can't hardly tell how-but
we pumped right agin each other on
the street. We didn't care forT thin
then, we was so glad, and eY i since
we have chung together SO COS, and
kept our eyes sot on each other so low
ing like-jest as you see the old man
looking at me noW-that ever body
Il, I.