The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1876-11-02
ITEMS OF INTEREST.

L L vi IN
THE cue which Kentuckians delight
to follow-the barbecue.
VERMONT is in the very midst of the
maizy pumpkin-pie party season.
A NEW version-"y who have
hats to pay, prepare to pay them
now"
THE Canadians are out with their
handsleds and sidewalk shOvels, hOun-
dering around in two feet of snow.
CRUEL cruell The Detroit Free
Press says that no woman can open her
portmOnnaie without sticking out her
tongue.
CITIZENS of Albany, N. y, have
formed milk association, being DIES
perately determined to have pure milk
or know why.
! ROUGH ON HIM" Can you spell
donkey with one letter. asked a silly
young man of a bright girl. Eyes"
she answered-"u."
THE rheumatic house-hy has got 50
! that you can coax him down from the
ceiling in the early morning with
! broom and duSt-pan.
| A BLACK HILLS miner, named Bah.
cock, sold his claim for 81, 800, and be-
cause it was resold in few days fol
| $4,000, went crazy over it.
A SAN FRANCISCO man has been
| sued for whisky bill Of S7,14O, run
up at a bar for drinks-the greater
portion of which were consumed by
| himself.
GEORGE WILLIAM CURTIS says ga
ship on the ocean is only Il chip with
a thought in it, Then chip in the
wood-house is only ship without a
thought in it.
WE don't care how good he is, the
man whose coat pockets always catch
on the door knob as he goes out of
room, can get up u most terrific repu-
tation for unbridled profanity.-Btr-
( ti1gton HalCk-Eye.
"WELL, my DEAR" said a good pastor
at Sunday-schOol to a toW-headed
urchin, II am glad to hear you are
getting to be better boy why,
sir" said little Joe, looking up with
grave earnestness, @ amt been sick"
AN intelligent youth, recently en-
gagged in commercial office, made out
il shipping bill for "fourty" barrels of
-four. His employer called his atten-
ton to an error in the spelling of
forty. "Sure enough" replied the
promising clerk, 81 left out the gh."
Mrs. SITTING BULL got possession
of a fashion magazine the other day,
and was so delighted with the latest
modes that she cut out all the colored
! plates and pasted them on various parts
of her body: She says they are "a
heap nice" and she wants her hus-
band to subscribe for year, to enable
her to wear the latest styles every
mOnth.-NOTrist0eOn Herald.
A LITTLE bright-eyed four-year-old
boy, upon hearing his father read the
touching story of Joan of Arc, was
greatly moved by her sad trials; but
when the part was reached where she
was about to be burned to death at the
stake, the poor little fellow could not
contain himself longer, but sobbingly
clutched his parents arm, and, with
big tears running down his plump
cheeks, cried, but, papa, where
were the police?'
A NEGRO town-crier in Palmyra,
La, was sent out to ring his bell and
shout, "Col. Anderson will speak at
the town-hall tonight, on the Green
back and Peter Cooper question: He
made the announcement correctly sew
eral times, and then it got changed to,
"Oh, yes! oh, yes! Col. Cooperback
will speak on the Green Peter ques-
tionp' When last heard he was yell
ing, "Whoop-a-la? Green Peterson
will speak on the Coop question this
EVENING"
THE MEAN WRETCH.-Mr. Dorkins
hurried into the house, and exclaimed,
1--WE got another, my dear-a good
one. If you were on the top of
church spire on the back of a goose,
how would you get DOWN." Mrs.
Dorkins thought she'd jump down,
slide down the lightning conductor, fly
down on the goose, fall down, and then
gave it up. "Why, if you wanted to
get DOM, you could pick it off the
back of the goose" said Mr.. Dorkins,
exultantly.
Mrs. BROOKS, who made in but
ter model of the head of the
dreaming "Iolanthe," gave some ex-
hibitions of her work before a COM
mittee of ladies and gentlemen, in
the judges hall on the Centennial
grounds, few days since. She
took about fifteen pounds of butter,
ladle and spoon and piece of wire,
and, with a looking-glass before her,
she consulted the lights and shadows
and contour of her own face, and in
little while human head and face was
successfully finished, to the satisfac-
ton Of those present. s-.s.s--.r,---
THIRTY-sEvEN British railway COM