The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1876-12-07
Second Marriages.

Second Marriages.
NOTHING is more characteristic than
the very general sentiment of disap-
probation with which women regard
second marriage. Their first impulse
is to condemn it, and to speak, if not
with oensure, at least in terms of gen.
tie depreciation, of the people who
have entered upon it. Talk to the
lOveliest of her sex of the sorrows of q
widower, and she will probably reply,
THAT is a grief for which he will
soon find consolation" Announce the
engagement Of such one i'll any cir
Gle of friends, and the feminine por-
tion will Immediately begin to count
the months and years since the death
of his former wife. There will be OBJ
servations upon the transitory nature
of human affections, and the quality
of forgetfulness which inheres in men.
Yet the severity of wOmanly comment
on mans second marriage is tenn
percd with mlldnesS, most women be-
ing conscious of tolerant pity for the
helplessness and loneliness of male
creature left to take care of himself,
or to battle through the world with
children. 1t is to women that they
look for fidelity beyond the reach of
another love. The widow who lays
aside her weeds and gives herself once
more to welded joys, is felt by many
of her married sisters to have lost
caste, and is imagined by some of the
unmarried to have done them a per-
sonal wrong. She has stepped from
the niche, sanity and revered, where
her dark days placed her, and descend
ed to the ordinary commonplace level
of life. 1t is not in India only that the
wife is thought most of who is willing
to immediate herself on her husbands
funeral pile. Equally are there COM
munities here, where she who is "a
widow indeed occupies station
quite unapproached in its exceptional
reverence, and where she who seems
to listen again to matrimonial over
lures is thought to have forfeited a
little of the traditional esteem with
which sympathy had invested her.
The foundation of this unfornulated
creed of society is built broadly on the
respect we all feel for true love. Love
is strong as death, we say, with sup
plement in our hearts to the effect that
it ought to be stronger. Its silver cord
should not be looSened, though the
angels stretch it over into the shad-
owy land whittier our beloved have
been taken. We miScalculate the
length of labOrious days, lightened by
happy memories, but dimmed by pres
ent tears. We forget how hard it is to
Of kisses js' G9RfneneWvtdd, 9n vtdd 81 R8HSGffsssioRs
longer tangible, of voices hushed. We
do not estimate the force of the re-
bound by what the soul, desolate,
weary, unstrung, lacerated in its hnest
sensibilities, turns to receive the
sweetness of some gentle compassion,
or some tender comprehension. Ollen
it is those whose welded lives nave
been most united, flowing on like
poem set to fitting music, who seem
soonest to be ready to rear new tenn
ple on the ruins of the old. Perhaps
in their case the heart-hunSer IS the
deepest, and the vacancy needs most
to be filled. Whatever may be the
reason, it is fact beyond denial that
many second marriages, so Tar
as the world can see. are
more satisfying and fellcitous
than the first were. The choice OF the
man in the maturity of his powers Is
often quite other from the selection Oh
his youth. No doubt in second mar.
riaqe there is less of the element q
falling in love, and more of sober Judg-
ment. The youth was won by the
pretty face, with its soft curves, lts
sea-shell tinting, its swift siushes,
and dewy freshness. Propinqulty had
much to do with his decision. lie
lived near her fathers house. Ihey
sang in the same choir. They went
to the same church. Neither had
emerged from the crudities OF adoles-
cence. or knew to what manner oI
man or woman the soul within them
would grow, when they phghted their
trotb and took on them solemn VOWS.
Whether in the closeness of daily COM
panionship they would become KNIT
and blended into completeness which
is possible only to duality when love
unifes it, or whether they would fnd
life hopelessly halved, was a problem
thev could not resolve. No second
marriage ought to be the result OF a
passing fancy or the product OF a ca
price. Love should be real and pure
but it should be deeper than a senti-
ment. 1t should dare to look open
eyed at the chances it has for develop
ment into that perfect affection which
is based upon tastes, pursuits, AIMS
and education in common.-HdrpeT
BdzGr.
Who's a runnin' for President
, over here ?" innocently inquired Ne"
York rustic who crossed Lake Cha'''
plain into Vermont the other day.