The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-09-16
HOME MATTERS.
"rM STABBED!I'M ROBBED!
Oh, the Bad Men! Oh, the Victims!
Oh, Pitch !" Oh, Poker" Oh, "slor Oh

1t was dark, stormy night,-ast Friday
night
the thickenng sky,
| Like a dark ceiling stood: down rushed the rain
impctuous,-
all without was drcary and melancholy, as Val.
entlus, gay and festive legal gentleman Of re
nown, who takes his beer, and gan.boiS on the
green, wended his way TO IL naughty bilious room.
Though the rain descended, he needed it not,
and though the mud was deep ana dirty, all was
unnotced. His thoughts were far away--among
the mysteries Of the old Roman practice, or
sounding the depths OF the old English common
law-among the deeds OF chivalry-not passed
entirely yet as he thought over his own late
brilliant achievement in tilt with the whole
body Of Knights of the Round Table, which pour.
ed beer iatO his portable treasury, and sheckles
too in small quantities. And night threw her
covering around him as he went
The scene changes: 1t is now brilliantly
lighted (wih one email gas JET parlor; heavy,
rich carpeing-Jf saw .dust-coycrs the floor,
while II ric! tapestry--of cObwebs, &c.-haDgs
from the ceiling, and adds its richness to the
scene; aud he atmos phcre Of the gorgeous room
is loaded with the delicious fumes of burning
incense--orpoor 3 cent cigars, we've forgotten.
At the fanOns Round Table sit the worthy
Knights: knights who rest, as il were, from
their labor and are now stationary, aud also
knights Grant, "on their mus" and b,u' to
rope IN any tody and everybody. Vaentius is in
the midst, gazing with thoughtful eye on the
restless company, and with steady nerve Guyin9
or selling ashc he opportunity. The game this
night !, " bitch -" auction pitch with the
pedro aui the sanchO,' aud Valentus is not
"a TIE ri"3-thercfore, happy. He is away up
leads the count; his luck has been immense his
hands have filed, and high, low, saucho, game"
was rs nothing. He is very happy, visions Of
free beer AID cheroots come up before his eyes.
One Of the Granger Knights, from Clark St..
ChicaSo,-Ceals. Valentius gets four tens" ,
pair Nov, 80 pair, tens" is not a bad hand al
that gentle and innocent game Of poker-its Il
very good iand, in fact. So our hero remarks
casually, Sow, II we were playing poker, I'd
have a vey pretty hst-full.' Whereupon Il
Heighbor sad he too had poker" and asked
how much our hero held. He said he would 20
e. on IL. 'Oh, | don't want to bet money" said
the strange Knight, "but I'll bet the drinks on
it, They let, aud our hero showing his two
pair, won. lie became more happy. Soon an
Errant knight deals again, and our hero has
more pokef-3 queens this time,-and lie is Wild
to show It, jut no one is willing to see - him.
And thus it goes on, until" Great Caesar, it is
wonderful he poker hold to-night-ncyer saw
anything Ike it. III bet two dollars on this
hand ?" he cries, still harpng on his two dollars.
/" Well" quietly remarked Knight Of The
Store" !, too, have some little poker-Il bet
you $40" But our hero didn't want to bet $40
till finally the foreign knight "blufed him so
furiously that TO hold his armour he had 10 bet,
and after collecting all his coppers and nickles,
&c, he laid down $40. He could hardly wait to
show his two pair, jacks" before reaching for
them stakes when the Knight said, Hold on,
please, you haven't seen my hand yet" and care.
lessly ran OIL two pair, queensr-well, II the
lightning frcm a clear ky had, &c; If ten thou