The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1876-06-29
All Serts Of Paragraphs.

Dom Pedro is anxious to meet the
poets of America. So were We before
we We went into the newspaper business.
"A Granger writes to rural paper tc
ask chow long COWS should be milked p
Why, the same as short COWS, of course
-Dupes, indeed are many; but OF
all dupes there is none so fatally situated
as he who lives in due terror of being
duped.
"A batchelor made will; leaving
his property to the girls who had refused
him: For to them I owe all my earthly
happiness"
E"That was very greedy of you
Tommy, to eat your little sisters share o1
cake p "You told me, ma, was always
to take her part" said Tommy.
- 1t was Prentice who declined to dis
cuss the question of woman suffrage in
his journal, because he had considered
woman, from the creation, as side is
sue.
= The largest feet known to history
must be those of Maryland editor, who
writes: 1--WE black our boots with 15,-
100000 boxes of domestic backing a
year" :,
"A little boy, whose conduct made
his r,other say she feared he did not pray
replied: eyes, I do; I pray every night
that God will make you and pa like my
ways better"
- The lady who sees that $50, ,0oO
necklace on exhibition in Philadelphia
without wishing she had it will be enti-
tied to one new silk dress as soon as she
reaches home. -.
-Shun the inquisitive, for thou wilt
be sure to find him leaky; open ears dc
not keep conscientiously what has been
intrusted to them, and word once spoken
flies never to be recalled.
"A Western editor met a well edu'
Gated farmer recently, and informed him
that he would like to have something
from his pen. The farmer sent him 8
pig and charged him 1915 for it.
- Here is soliloquy of Partisan in:
ebriate, addressed to his hat, which hao
fallen off: eff pick you up, | fall If
fall you will not pick me up-then l leave
you" And he staggered proudly
away.
When California woman defeated
a lion in a hand-to-hand combat, the
neighbors were greatly astonished, but hel
husband quietly remarked; "Oh, that's
nothing, that woman could lick the
devil"
- At medical examination young
aspirant for physicians diploma was
asked: "When does modification en-
sue?" "When you propose and are re-
jected," was the reply that greeted the
questioner. =,
"A merchant went home the Other
night and said cheerfully to his wife
"Well, my dear, Pve failed at last" On
that's good |" exclaimed the wife with
radiant face; "now we can 60 to the Cen
tennial, sure"
"A woman who went to concert tc
hear Blind ~om "play by ear" writes
that she was swindled, and wants us tt
expose the fraud. She says that instead
of playing by ear, he played with his fin
gers, Just like other performers.
1T is not work that kills men, it is
worry. Work is healthy; you can hard
ly put more on man than he can bear
Worry is rust upon the blade. 1t is moi
the revolution that destroys the machine
ry but friction. Fear secretes acids, but
love and trust are sweet juices.
Never disregard what your enemies
say: They may be severe; they may bs
prejudiced; they may be determined
to see only in one direction; but still
that direction they see clearly. They dt
not speak all the truth, but they gener-
ally speak the truth from one point
of view so far as that goes, attend te
them.
"A writer in the London Daily Ne.c
says: "It is not, unfortunately, generally
known that in the case of fire in build
ings containing horses, if the harness
be merely put on, however roughly, the
horses will quit their stables without diff
fculty. A knowledge of this fact may
be the means of saving many valuable
animal from horrible DEATH"
"A little four year old remarked tt
her mamma, on going to bed. "1 am moi
afraid oc the dark" "No, of course you
are not" replied her mamma, for il
can't hurt YOU" "But mamma, 1 was 6
little afraid once when l went into the
pantry in the dark to get a cooky."-
aWhat were you afraid of" asked hei
mamma. "I was afraid I couldn't find
the cookies"
ga sick bed," remarks the Danbury
Neys, ''is a good place for observation
Wa 1earn sone thinps there which we
could not very we'll acquire elsewhere
One of them is that two women whisper
ing in the next room can be plainly heard
while you might lay there and yell at the
top of your voice without making either
or even both of them together hear. We
don't pretend to understand this, but WE
know it is 3d."