The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1876-12-30
Our PHILADELPHIA Letter.
PhlIa.. Pa. Dec. 9th, 1875

DEAR ADVOCATE IL shall not write
you again this year.
1t will soon be time fo- us to examine
our letters and see how many will write
1876 instead of 1877.
The favorite song of the police is
"Give us arrest"
They seem to want Hayes in at
Washington, but they won't have has-
ing at Annapolis
Thousands of our citizens derive
great pleasure and profit in getting be
hind "The Times" and they do it |
"every morning, except Sundays, Then |
they go to church
"Returning Board ?" catch me doing |
It," said an irate landlady, 1--WE poor
folks catch it enough on hash, let alone |
returning board"
Here's an advertisement from Lon
don paper ;
A CONTRIVANCE whion, applied to the
n nose for m hOur daily, 40 directs the soft
cartilage Of which the member consists that an
Informed nose is quickly shaped to perfection,
l0s. cd. sent by post for stamps ALEX. Ross,
24S. High HOl0Ofn
Fair lady, If your beau has crooked
nose, what better Christmas present
could you give him than "Nose Ma.
chine" Fond lover, has thy sweet
heart an uneven nose Make her
happy and let her make herself a grace
full nose by using your present OF
"Nose Machine" What splendid
thing "Nose Machine" would be for
children whose noses are out OF iOint on
account of "fresh arrival" or because
of disappointment III Christmas pres-
ents.
How detected an unsold turkey looks
after Christmas Day.
Many valuable and ornamental trees
we're cut down and stolen by Christmas
tree thieves.
Full as many hands as feet went into
| stockings on Christmas morning.
Too much turkey and mince pie,
Made little Johnny for to cry.
The turkey survivors are coming
from their hiding places.
Mrs Jones called Jones "a hog"
Because he took too much egg nOgg.
IT'S hard, tits very hard /" hs said,
as he picked himself up from off the
frozen sidewalk.
Old santa Claus said
| IT was Simply shocking,
| To think that hr should find hole
IN sweet Misc Bing's stocking.
Christmas day was day of joy for
the free lubch friends and right merrily
did they work their routes.
The city seemed on Christmas eve to
be filed with teachers, there are so
many tooters about.
1t is a remarkable fact that it is al
most impossible to get children to go to
sleep early on Christmas eve.
CHRIsTMAs EVE lip
Slowly ana softly he crept out Of bed,
SLOWLY and softy he went down st1irs
Slowly and softly these words he said
"ls that the tree asked Tor in my prnyerar
Bright is tho child who got up early
and "went for" the fattest stocking.
As we have but few fire places in the
the city, Santa Claus, in mauy instan-
ces had to disiont himself and come
through the registers in many sections
| A party of masqueraders went into Q
house on Christmas evening, with Tho
fond anticipation of having "a gooC
feed" but cake was all they received
"It kept us from starving, anyway,
said one of the party as they left for
Fields afresh aud pastures new"
Jokes of aud about celery are now il
: order, 'Raise your celery" and so On
1 SAD.
' She called him "a cake"
And gave him the shake"
= "This chimney don't SCOT me-" sal
Santa Claus, as he went down th
!, chimney OF a new house.
Father Adam must have been in goo
n humor when he called the apple of hi
. eye, his "Chrstmas Eve"
= A popular mSn seems to be-Po
. Corn.
. Thomas was not well on Christina
a night he was sick, very sick, and whe
= he went on to tell the company that Il
4 had hic-tually seen tree dressed wit
. bacon and green's" his family thougl
II best to eZcnse him from further partlc
~ patton in the Christmas festivities. S
~ they put him in his little bed.
!, Chamberain's Christmas prayer
"a "Grant us thy blessing and protect iC
n in this South Carolina direction"
N Good bye until next year.
: Yours, faithfully,
m MARCUTIo.