Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1876-11-22

SOluS OuG dS AmoElCHu CONSUL 10 one OI
the italian cities on the Mediterranean.
On the Way to the Centennial.
Says /" Mahlstick," the New York
correspondent of the Coaprier-Joarnal
!" I boarded Centennial train at New
Brunswick, and rode thirty miles
amidst an odor of haystacks, villagers
and eggs. Across the aisle from where
[ sat was a gentleman clad in russell
He was about sixty years Of age, and
surveyed mankind from under a. hat
made from block which must have
crumbled into powder centuries ago
His shoes were covered with hard
baked mud, which seemed to annoy
the proprietor of it, for he occasionally
scraped his feet on the gaping iron
jaws of black carpet-bag, an evident
heirloom. A young fiend who roamed
unmolested through the Car with a
basket on his arm, sold the old man
three bananas, objects as surprising to
him as any chapter in the Revelations
In front of him sat his son and
daughter-in-law, a pleasant, civilized
couple, who didn't seem to be proud of
the old man. He divided his bananas
with them, and proceeded solemnly,
and with evident misgivings, to peel
the one he kept. He bit that banana,
after smelling at it over q foot off,
looked dubious, bit again, and got away
with half of it; then he concluded to
take the remainder home to the old
woman-about g. three days journey
Impelled by this spasm of generosity
he took up his carpet-bag in order to
stow away the fragment Of the feast
AS he opened it, he discov-
cred that the scrapings of his
shoes had left scant slowing
room; whereupon he tumbled out the
geological formation into the lap Of his
temporary companion, a pleasing He
brew seated at his side The Jew re-
fused, with great Indignation, this ten
der of real estate, although it cost him
nothing as it may seem
Now the ola pilgrim, wishing 70 deposit
his moity of banana in the bottom of
the bag, where it could not be injured,
made a general Jail delivery, and out
of that bag came bald-headed hair
brush-or nearly so-a few hairs alone
remaining; a fne-tooth comb, which
to clean would have been as dangerous
as to remove Times accumulations on
the canvas of an old master: some ex-
tremely worn shirt collars, horribly
soiled; a red flannel undershirt; some
stockings, so rent and battered that I
concluded his custom WAS to wear them
outside of his shoes, and half a peck of
fro tow n nh v-h,cl
peared to be the result of feast that
had exploded in some mysterious man
ner. The old man chased bits of ham
about, and cornered biscuits, every
once and a while laying a particularly
fat piece of ham on the Jews trowsers,
an unconscious delicate attention, a
species of Mosaic charade. Having
cleared out the the hold and restored
the cargo, the old man, who seemed to
be devoured with a raging thirst, made
his twentytieth trip for a glass of wa
ter. In getting out of his seat, he
crushed his daughters bonnet and
tumbled over the Jew. When he re-
turned he was doubtful about his abili-
ty to get into his seat, which was next
the window. He took hold of the back
Of his seat, and chung to it, and
then lifted one leg over the child of
Jerusalem, but could not make up his
mind, having no faith in himself to
speak of, to let his hand loose until he
had come to anchor. This evolution
resulted in his getting the Jews head
into chancery. With one arm around
the neck of that prosecuted Israelite,
he literally tumbled over into his
place, with the neck under his arm.
The victim of this manupuvre came
to the surface in total darkness, with
his hat driven down on to his neck,
while the daughter Strengthened out her
bonnet, which had again been crushed.
The Jew metaphorically hung his harp
upon the willow. He fled to the
smoking car. The trium plant old
Granger fell asleep in his shoes, to the
intense grief of the whole company.
[ think liberal subscription could
have been taken up on the spot to have
had that old man wound up again 80
that he could have run to the end of
the Journey. A pleasant gentleman
seated beside me, who had been roar
ing with laughter, and was as much
OiCS1oCu DIS IL Vie alClonC man naQ DG0n
his father, told me that he saw this un-
conscious instrument of mirth at the
Centennial negotiating for the purchase
of an apple from a smart young fe-
male, who was turning an honest
Quaker penny in a genealogical way.
Three CENTS" exclaimed the old
man; "why, | give 'em away to the
hogs at home"
"Thats what We are doing" retorted
the young woman.
AN old woman who is crossing the
street has a narrau onoaxa f.o,o,