davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

KEEP THE FEET DRY-More than One-half the
s'ckhess among country people is caused by wet
Ieet Colds, fevers and all kinds Of complaints,
S arc ,ne frequent results of wet feet. Earache,
headache. and all sorts of aches in onr children
are arc produced by wet feet. Guard against wet
ieet. ana yon will ward off more than half the
s sickness OF the world. Keep your feet warm and
NY, ana you Will keep good health. Wear thick,
9gn. o1ots and shoes, and make your children
do IT. IL is better to provide them than to paw
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

A VALUABLE PRODUCT.-The raising of fax
and hemp is earnestly urged on American agri-
eulturists by some of the foreign manufacturers.
In some parts of the west fax pays double to
the acre what wheat does. The statement made
by these parties, that the United States annually
import $50, 000. 900 of fax and hemp from Russia
OF from anywhere else, is false. We do import
about S14, 000, 900 of linens annually but the i'm
port of raw hemp and flax does not amount to
100000. In time, perhaps, we shall natural
ize the linen manufacture, we have cotton
and woOlen or go back to it, in the way of our
Crandmothers.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

Sacramento gentleman whose premises we've
overrun with rats, was Informed that the best
way to get rid Of them was to give them feed
of yeast cakes, the idea suggested being that the
as long as their stomachs had room. then take a
drink aud retire. The water and gastric Juice
in their stOmachs would Immediately cause the
yeast to act, and, as the suggester of the plan
remarked, lit just raises 'em up The citizen
purchased some yeast cakes by way of expert
ment, and next morning discovered some very fat
but greatly isdisposed rats in bis yard, and dis
patched them.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

PROBABLY one half of our farmers practice
watering their teams Immediately after eating.
There is nothing about the stable economy worse
than this, except, perhaps, allowing the animals
to go altogether uncleaned or half cleaned from
day to day. A large portion of the water drank
by horses, especially where large quantities are
given, goes directly to the intestines and if Civ
en- Immediately after eating, carries consdera-
BILE portion of undigested food with it, to be
voided whole or nearly so. Thus the contents of
the stomach are washed ont of it before dges-
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27
Cur Strap 8uuk.
SHE WOULD BE A MASON.

1890 "SOAo DE -
The funn lest story ever heard
The funniest thing that ever occurred,
Is tue story OF Mrs Mehitable byrue,
Who wanted To be a Mason.
Her husband, Tom Byrde. Mason true,
As good a Mason any of YOU;
He Is Tier of Ledge Cerulean Blue,
And tiles and delivers the summons due;
And she wanted TO be a Mason TOO,
This ride uOus Mrs. Byrde.
She followed him round this inquisitive wife: ~.
And nabbed him and leased him nan out Oh us iie
80, to terminate this unhalowed suhe,
He consented at last to admit her.
And first to disguise her from bonnet and shoon'
This ridiculous lady agreed to put on
His breeches-ah foreive-I mean Pantaloons'
And mirac ulOusly did they nj her'
The Lodge was at work in the Masters Degree
The light was ablaze on the letter u
High SCARED the pillars and d,
The officers sat Ike Solomon wise.
The birthstone burned amidst horrid cries;
The goat roamed wildly through the room,
And the devil himself stood up in the East,
As proud as an Alderman at FEAST
When in came Mrs. Byrue.
oh, horrible sound oh. horrible sight!
Can il be that Masons take dehght
In spending thus the hours OF ngnti
All! could their wives and daughters kho"
The mutt cradle things they say anu 90
But this is not all of my story.
For those Masons Joining in a hdeous ring,
The candidates bowling like everything
And thus, in tones Of DEATH they sing
The candidates name was Morey-
Blood to drink and bones to crack,
Skulls to smash and lives TO take
Hearts to crush and souls to burn,
Give old MOrey another turn;
And make him all grim and CORY.
Trembling with horror stood Mrs. Byrde,
Unable to speak a single word;
She staggered and fell in the nearest chair
On the left Of the Junior Warden there,
And scarcely noticed, so loud the groans,
That the chair made of human bones
OF human bones, on grin ming skulls
That CHASTITY throne of horror rolls;
Those skulls the skull that Morgan bore!
Those bones the bones that Morgan wore!
His scalp across the top was flung
His teeth around the arms were strung
Never in all romance were known
Such uses made of human bone
The birthstone CLEANED in lurid flame
Just like the place we will not name;
G God angels that nguiring came
From blissful courts, looked on with shame,
And tears melancholy.
Apain they dance but twice as bad;
They Jump and sing like demons mad,
The tune is Hunky DOrey,
Blood to drink, &c, &c.
Than came n Nausea pair of paws
Reached through the floor. up sliding DOORS
And grabbed the unhappy candidate
How can l. without tears, relate
The lost and ruined Morey 5 fate
She saw him sink in fiery hole;
She heard him scream, My soul! my soul!
While roars of fendish laughter roll,
And drown the yells of mercy!
Blood to drink, etc., etc.
The ridiculous woman could stand no more;
She tainted and fell on the checkered flo OF,
Midst all the diabolical roar.
What then you ask me, did befall
Mebitable Byrdel Why, nothing at all
She dreamed that she'd been in the Masons hall
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

For ornamental purposes and for shade, the
cherry is almost superior to any other fruit bear
ing tree. Its beautiful and graceful form, its
early sheet of white blossoms covering it as with
q mantle of snow; its dense green foliage which
soon follows the fall of the blossoms, and its
beautiful pendant fruit in red OF jet clusters,
nestled in delightful contrast with the emerald
foliage, make it an object ut once charming to
the sight and grateful to the senses.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

RYE sowed on corn stubble in the Spring will
make a tolerable pasture good for sheep, and
light land managed in this way will be better
fitted for crop of wheat than TO put on oats OF
any other crop and allow the same to ripen. The
sheep will keep the land clear, and the rye being
consumed on the land, the soil will be proper
tionately enriched
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

THIS is how Elder Pike tries to define chronic
rheumatism: Swallow two quarts of CARPET
tacks, take running jump bare-legged into a
barrel of broken beer bottles, let a swarm of en-
ragged hornets roOst on your head, and then roll
faint idea of the nature and sensation of a first
class rheumatism when it gets hold of you and
means business.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

A NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. missionary, who I'M
dertOok to prosecute his evangelical labors in q
mining town in Nevada, was waited on by a
committee who considered his manner of present.
ing the Gospel rather infeGcitous. Assuring him
of their kind disposition toward him, and of
their high esteem for the cause in which he was
engaged, they gave him broad hint to seek
some other field of usefulness by simply saving /:
"NOw you can git, pard; We amt agin religion
out here, and it rifles to see a Teller splin' it.
Git" And he "gOt." Who could refuse to take
such hintP
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

A CORRESPONDENT of the Rural Netc York7
says: "set tomato plant into each hill of Gu.
cumbers, melons, and squashes, and You will
have no trouble with the striped bugs that ar
so destructive to these plants. The plants car
be tied to stakes, and if well pruned when large,
both subjects can proceed with their fruiting
without detriment to one another"
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

CONFESSIONAL Methodist and Quaker travel
ling together, stopped at hotel, and were bott
given the same room The Metbodist mod.
much confession of himself When he rose from
his knees, the Quaker said, "Dost mean all thee
said friendf" Being answered in the affirmative
he shrugged his shoulders, and said, "Then thou
art too bad q man for me to sleep with thee
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

GRAPE-vINEs should be planted as soon as the
soil is in proper condition, using no manure. Cut
back the canes to three eyes, only one of which
should be allowed to grow. Pillow old vineyards
and apply dressing of coarse ground bones.
Posts for trellises may be set whenever the frost
is well out
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

BLACK tooth, so called, in swine is sometimes
caused by mechanical injury to the teeth, receiv-
ed by chewing the dry and hard kernels of corn
Such decayed teeth may be removed by the same
instrument as dentist would use in extracting
persons decayed tooth
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

Brown came home late the other night, and
Mrs. B., reaching out of the bedroom window,
said: So you've been tipping the glass again,
have your GLASS" said Brown; "fhic) It's a
innny word; take off the e. and it's you, my
dear Yes" answered the wife, land then
lake oil the II aud it's you You wretch" and she
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

bREviri-one of Denyer's Col. Sheritf's Off
Gers has received the following:
hnnd away red and wife CAT. His tn be-
,il.t ,eg vas Pack. he vas she caf Enipotti
s.o,o, "JAcoB ZuppERING.
''Clear Creek, tree miles pehind te nr;d%sS
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

BLAckBERRIEs ought to be planted early, be
fore they commence their growth. as thew are IL
able to be injured if moved after they are start
ed. Six feet apart is sufficient if all suckers ar,
kept out, and the branches pinched back during
growth.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

SET raspberries ont as early as the ground will
allow, in rows from four to six feet apart, ae
cordihg TO variety. If the old canes were moi
cut away in the Fall, remove now, before tn,
new growth commences,
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

WHEN fences become old, and the boards be,
gin to come of, nail upright facing strips upon
them against each post, and the boards will bs
hrldste their place, and the fence will last sew
eraI wears longer.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

MR.. MOODY says man is a failure p-oL.l,,
Mr.. Moody never saw young man n,a,' Ho
ball all day, and billiards half the night ana az,
up IN the morning and jaw around an bonr e
cause his mother did not have enough stiffenino
IN his shirt bosom. Man a failure indeedI
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

NEARLY all sick animals become so by improp
er feeding in the first place. Nine cases out Of
ten the digestion is wrong. Charcoal is the most
efficient and rapid corrective. 1t will cure ;
majority of cases, if properly administered
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

A CRITICALLY revised edition Of the tent of Job
has been announced in Leipsic. 1t is pleasant
TO hear anything about Job now, as the boil sea
than usual. -
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

1T is said that the old Romans also loved Office
ont they never had the feeling which an Ameri
can constable has-never felt that their shout
ders carried over half the burden of govern ment
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

MAKE cuttings of such varieties of currants as
are wanted. and plant four inches asunder in
rows two feet apart, taking care to press the
earth firmly around the base of the cutting.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

BISHOP HAyEN's mother cooked turkey on
her eightyeighth birthday, and served it to guests
on plates fifty years old.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

You shor'll SOW timothy, red top, blue grass
and clover if you want pasturage that will give
the largest returns
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

PIRDs NIT yoost der same kind of folders vii
gone together init themselves.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1876-04-27

- A@ n day guaranteed using WELL AU-
GER AND DRILLS. s100a month paid
~ to good agents Anger book free. Jilz
Anger Co., ST. Louis No.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
1.-THE Davenport Steal

The New York Republican and Indepen-
dent journals still profess their inability to
understand how it could have been wrong
for JOHNNY DAsENroRT to use Government
money to prevent registration frauds. The
last issue OF the Herald speaks as follows
"Nor do we see that good is coming out
OF the investigation Of the manner in which
the Federal officers punished election frauds
in New York.
There is one Western paper-and one that
dcspiscs the Democrats-which has clearer
ideas OF right and wrong. The Chicago
Times says:
"Whethcr the Davenport steal was con-
Quoted according to the forms of law or not,
1t was q steal no less wicked and monstrouS
than the ballot-stutfinS scoundrelism which,
the moneyfs said to have been used to pre-
vent. Corruption at the political fountain
cannot be cured by any such SSmiHd stn'll
bus method. The pretended remedyis only
emulation of political diseases, OF whicl
the patient is dying"
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

Tas Ono DEaocaAcY.-[Special CORE
spondencc Chicago Times. + Columbus, o.,
MAY LII you want to so clean daft Just
take trip through Ohio, and as you ira
verse urban and rural districts inquire OF
the Democratic representative men OF the
various sections who their candidate !or
President is. In the course OF weeks
travel you will find men who favor almost
every prominent man from John the Bap-
tist to An drew Jackson, and when you come
to figure up the result Of thousands OF con-
versations upon the important subject you
will be about IA wise as when you COM
menced.
While there is q great difference OF opin-
ion as to whom Ohio Democrats should sup
port for this position, there is no doubt that
the mass OF the really substantial men Of the
party are at heart in favor of Senator Thur
man. His supporters are the men upon
whose shoulders the party burden, with all
its time-honored associations, has rested Tor
from twenty to forty years-thc men VINO,
through years OF party aisappolntments IN
this Republican State, have annually met
here to place their tickets in the field TO De
slaughtered and contributed their none!
TO assist in paying the annual funerai eN-
penses. The more substantial country
week.-Mrs. which have not hecn attacked by
the rag-money mania are for Thurman anu ma
will steal red-hot Thurman editorials from
metropolitan journals with unusual SuSto
in case their favorite should DC struch W
the political lightning ut st. LOUIS.
The boys, the hoodlums or the party, are
not for Thurman, partly because he IS 100
respectable, but principally because he not
in favor OF more money. A rather interest
ing function OF the lodgings prefer Iom
Ewing, because he is fine-looking, shrcWd,
and rather sets himself up as the champion
of the young Democracy. They are wiling
to take him rs their champion because OF ms
advanced soft-money ideas, seemingly for
getting that so short time as four years ago
he was the head and front OF the Liberal
movement, and publicly declared that the
Democratic party, as an clement Of reform,
had outlved its usefulness. While they
forget or ignore this, they also ignore the
fact that when the affairs OF the Democratic
party looked the blacklist it had for years,
Senator Thurman, in movement OF 1nSpl-
ration, had happy thought, which cventr-
ated in the resurrection OF one William
Allen, OF Fruit Hill.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

THE CANDIDATES N 1&7G.-Thc Tribune
has pointed out tie probable nomination OF
Mr.. Tildcn for President by the Democratic
Convention at st. Louis, and that this nomi-
nation would be forced upon the party by
the double necessity, W that no Democratic
candidate can be elected President without
the vote OF the State Of New York, and (2)
that the only Democratic candidate who can
give any reasonable hope OF carrying that
State is Mr.. Tilden. Under these circum-
stances the nomination OF Tilden is so i'm
minent that the Republican party in making
its nomination should be governed by the
necessity of beating Tilden in New York.
GhicnlO Tribune
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
DEATHS.

Died. the 9th day of May, at his residence. Nc.
1873 Seventeenth street. i'll the tifty-.ourih year OF
his age, Mr.. PHILIP HELFRICH.
The funeral will take place SUNDAY, May 7th, ut
O'Clock =. NJ, from ST. Johns German Lutheran
church. Friends and acquaintance are respectfully
invited to attend
Died, in the city OF Manchester, on the 9TH in
slant, JOHN MATHEW, infant sou of William and
Jane Cook; aged nine months and twenty-five days.
Beneath this stone in soft reposc
Is laid Il mothers dearest pride
4 flower that scarce had walked to life.
And light, and beauty, ere 1t died.
God in His wisdom has recalled
The precious boon His love had given.
And though the casket moulGers here
The gem is sparkling now in heaven. x
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

The Washington correspondent OF the
Boston Herald says that the next President
if he be chosen from among the candidates
now prominent, is not likely to be poor
man. On the Republican side Mr.. Blaine is
the richest. Secretary Bristow and his wife
are worth quarter OF million. Governor
Hayes is still better off. Senator Conkling
is believed to possess over 100000, while
Senator Morton and Mr.. Wheeler have il
smaller fortune. Governor Tilden, on the
Democratic side, is the wealthiest, he being
put down at S4,000,000 or S5,00o,090.
Judge Davis owns more than Sl,000,000,
and Senator Thurman has q large fortune.
Senator Bayard is well-to-do, while General
Hancock is in comfortable circumstances.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
,van,,, IL 70 give hin, ID fo the iate Of sey.

would be to give him up @ the fateo sey-
ironr.
The Richmond Dispatch, In replying TO
the Halifax Record, gives the proper view
Of the matter in the following words
Here followed the Dispatch renlarks.l
In our opinion, the Convention Is confined
TO choice between two mcn-Tilden and
Hancock. Either one will suit Us. Let the
Convention decide which is the more avail
able after n consultation among the delegates
from all parts OF the country, and the south
will give her solid vote FOR the result OF their
decision.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

To the Inder-Appeal: Those elections
were city and town elections. The Repub-
lcans gained as n rule. indianapolis was
the place that funny and good old Town
SEND was talking about.
We, too, regard these elections as OF some
little Importance, and said last week that
the results stated above constituted an
other argument III favor of the nomination
OF fEuDES
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
RICHMOND, VA, May 5, 1876.

RICHMOND, VA, May 8, 1876.
NFESSRS. EDITORS: l desire to state
WI that Mr.. James Is. Pace was not y candidate
against me for alderman in Jefferson Ward. Ills
name was placed on the ticket. as am convinced,
without his knowledge and against his consent; and,
in every form, during the day he and his immediate
personal friends have been assisting in my election.
ought to add that last night, In the general mass
meeting which took place in Jefferson Ward, 1t was
pcremptoriIy announced by his authority that he
would consent under circumstances to be candi-
date; and will further add that had he consented
to be candidate instead of refusing 10 be so, would
gladly have retired in his favor Is am satisfied nc
would have been the choice of the people and more
ably represented their interests
my Site JAMES {. SMITH.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
A Norfolk View.
fE'roa the yirpInian. f,tb]
q SENATOR BAYARp.

10. SENATOR BAYARD.
Among the names mentioned for the pre-
sidential nomination by the Democratic
party there is none tha. Is entitled to greater
respect than that OF Senator Bayard. He is
q man who has never Tor one momentabated
a iot or title OF his manhood. His record
is as pure as the driven snow, and his cha
racter beyond all praise. But for this very
reason we would not have him nominated at
the st. Louis Convention. He is too good
@ man to be slaughtered, and the people
OF the North have not yet sufficiently re-
covered from the effects OF the war to do
him justice. Senator Bayard is young and
can abide his time. We hope that it will
come ere many years have rolled their cycles,
and we shall Eeloie to. see that time and to
greet him as tile worthy successor OF the
Presidents OF the constitutional epoch.
Az present, to name him as eur candidate
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

d The premium for stupidity ought to be
Fgiyen either to the man who writes the So
called funny articles for the Philadelphia
Bulletin, or to the men who make it posi-
BILE for him to write them-that is, the read
ers OF the Bulletin. 1t can't be possible
that the same man who writes the sharp
savings on the second page writes the silly
articles that appear on the eighth page.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

IL crops out that the Cincinnati Enquirer
is making its desperate fight against Thur
man for two rcasons-one is on account Of
little canal scheme. TiHn(OD Star.
And Virginia should inquire into this
matter. 1t is the James River canal that the
Senator is sal Ito be opposed to assisting.
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

RICHMOND PoI1TICs.-[Special to the Ma
tional Republican. l-Richmlond, May 81
The contest in the Democratic primaries in
this city to-day resulted in breaking up the
old line Conservatives slate, and leaving
the ins'' out in the cold. w. c. CARING
ton was selected as the candidate for Mayor
by 400 majority, and james NJ. Tyler for
Civ Sergeant
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08
BANKRUPT NOTICES.
[5394.I

~" 5394.I
THIS IS TO GIVE NOTICE THAT ON
l. the Sd day of May, A. ID. 1876, warrant in
bankruptcy was issued out of the District Court Of
the United States for the Eastern District OF Virginia
against the estate of Clinton Jones, OF Dinwiddie
county. in said district who has been adjudgcd bank
rlpt on his petition: that the payment of any
debts and the delivery Of any property belonging to
fer of any property by him, are forbidden by law
that meeting of the creditors OF said bankrupt to
prove their debts, and choose one more assignecs
of his estate will be held ut court OF bankruptcy to
he holden at Petersburg. Va before D. /. Waterman,
ESQ., register in bankruptcy for said district, on the
goth day of May, 1876, 1T 10 O'Clock \. NJ
G. p RAMISDELL,
nv S-N2w United States Marshal
The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-05-08

Mr.. LORD, one Of the managers on the part
Of the House OF Representatives Of the i'm
parchment case Of w. w. BELKNAP, has al
ready proved himself to be able, capable,
and faithful. The Senate will not lack for
the law OF the case on his side.