National Republican., 1876-12-22
IN THE TOLLS.

observation-disclosures Ont OF the
Sinful Decentralization M0raIfzes.
"Say, younker, yer folks up thar haint let up
on ther gay CHANDELIERS yit, hes ysrf" said old
Flute McGilder to TIE REPuBLIcAN yesterday,
who stood at the door Of the courtroom, Hiping
his feet on the mat. apH ..s.
"Oh, no, senator, not yet. After while there
will be further developments, and there VIII be
weeping and wailing and gnashing of grinders,
you can bet, among the knights of the chips and
aces.' ~-.,-.-s .r.rrsz o. o -.r.rs q e -...
'swhat's chips and haces, lad9'' ,.s.,rss.
sShufrers, manipulators Of pasteboards, fakirs,
you know" 49,. 60, .+-Fsfs sr-. .rrs {. .5r.
"No, doant nuther Yer takes too many half
bitches around yer vernaculer. IT'S too heity fur
my liftin' tackle. Avast heavin', bub, aud spin
ief out straight" said the old man, shifting his
quid to his starboard cheek and throwing his
@Weii, Old party, 1 mean that the gamblers
will be startled at our future developments.
. "OHi, Ouf But shoot yer furrin talk and set
down. Wen call up that bill before them next
session, so adjourn now. Here comes the beak"
Thpssaying, the ancient bailif sat his cane in
the corner, hung up his hat, and squared on to
wrestle with his days work.
THE STRANGER WITHIN THE GATES.
Tumble up ere, yer lubber !" shouted Barton
to a mop-headed youth who leaned over the rail,
with 3 far-of look IN his eyes, and sang:
tsYe banks an braes o. bonnie DOOM
but was cut short as the Courts gfmlet eye pene-
trated his shirt front.
aWhat's your name, young man ~ asked the
%R6bert II Bruee. nee an it rIa1e the Court"
sWhat have you Deen doing"
uNsnu, sir, shure. Does look loike wudf''
mo: but the warrant says you stole pair Of
shoesY' 'E'Tr<F = =
=, "Er.walI. yer Homer, dadn't-sr, ah, UNI
did; but plaze, sor, me futs was cowld.n
"That's no excuse, Robbie; six months. Next !"
BROWN VS.. cHINN.
man nau,ad Rroup
Then stuck his head In, SO
+ And cast his eyes down
who sat near the door,
.r.f A smiling and grinning,
Then raised loud roar,
-. An soon began Ginning.
His Honor looked sad, =
And wore a grave frown.
--- ! = He Eaid things were baa
For poor Percy Brown,
And that he supposed,
For assaulting Of she,
The slight fine imposed,
Ten dollars should be.
INTINIDAT1oN.
sawyer named Josiah Adams, charged with as
sauiting his better half Maria.
Said the Court; Maria, tell what this man
"Well, Jedge; yer see dats my ole man, he is;
am 1 'spose he's boss, dat is when he havss his
frow no gin bottle at my he'd; no, sab; Specially
,ef it amt got nuttin In IT, so Jest done had i'm
What did you do? Why did he cast the recep
taele for intoxicating fluid at your caputT"
why did he throw the gin bottle at your
aOh, jest cause 1 said dsr warnt no salt poke
in de house; den he said If didn't shet up he'd
'timidate me, and frowed de bottle at me: dat de
'.0h! 10, see,p said the beak taking pinch of
snuff; thists clear case of intimidation: Rather
bad this. How much does he deserve, Barton?"
eSSeViQQ weeks. HOQQ0r.'
''GOOd, mark il up, Mr.. Harper, and now what
have we here?" r---T
RETRENCHMENT AND REFORM.
"Fine leedIe poys vat vas a-schlinging of
policeman, with one side of his nose speckled like
q Guinea hens egY.- 1869
~ hrowing stones, eh A straight road to the
d; oh! that is, destruction. Now, young gen
tlemen, this is an age of reform. This Court is
here to carry out that end, and as we sit here
looking at your weIl-deveIoped nose-that is
brows-the past, as Bob Ingersoll says, rises be-
fore us like dream. The Court remembers when
it threw stones and the applications of the mater
We repeat it, sirs, what vas the result :"
fffr-itnwed sun moar."
''Shut DIP, sisi sew dare you interrupt, N@S: ~: NJ
gradually arose to our present posrtlon where the
law is dispensed by our merciful hand You, too,
may rise. That boy who spoke will rise-with
rope about his neck. The boy with the patch on
the seat Of his pants will rise-as hod-csrrier.
rise to the dignity of a cab-drlver. The boy with
the sore nose bids fair to rise--to the chimney
tops as sweep; and this one here. looking
crOsseyed bids fair to rise to the height of vii
lainy. But all of you lads stand as good show
as g. Washington or p. Cooper for the Presi-
dency, and IN the meantime the court will send
you to the Reform school to await further de-
yelopments, and now, MI. Barton, what says
THE RETURNING BoARDs?"
"As we now stand, sir, we have still on score
one hundred and eighty-fye."
''GOod; and General Crocker is still to be
heard from"
"Yes, SIR"
Then let all within hearing pay attention.
This court stands adjourned until tomorrow. Let
no guilty man escape; and you, my faithful SUBJ
jeets, will be rewarded in the sweet bye-and-bye.
Now, Mr. Barton pitch the key, and after sing
ing the closing anthem we will get hence"
Barton motioned to his 'klds'' TO rise, and to
gether they sang:
"We'll be off to meet Joe Hodgson,
He's the man we want to see,
Where Wen feed on pork and bears, sirs,
TOodle, doodle, doodle, DUN dee"
As their voices echoed through the grim hall of
justice reporter stole Quietly down the stairs,
borrowed chew cf fine cat from Marshall Eek
loft and went to police headquarters to see how
many gambling hells bad been closed during the
night.