Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1876-04-07
srleeted se|istrllanp.
A NARROW ESCAPE.

Mark Twain contributes the follow
ing to Tom Hoods Annual
The only merit | claim for the follow
ing narrative is that it is a true story.
1t has moral on the end of it, but
claim nothing on that, as it is merely
thrown in to curry favor with the reli-
gious element.
After | had reported for couple of
years on the Virginia City (Nev) Daily
Enterprise. they promoted me to be
editor-in-chief; and lasted just week
by the watch. But ] made an uncom-
mon lively paper while | did last, and
when / retired | had duel on nv
hands and three horse whippings prom
Used me-
The latter | made no attempt to col
lcct; however, this history concerns
only the former. 1t was the old "hush
times" of the silver excitement, when the
population was wild and mixed every
body went armed to the teeth, and all
Sights and insults had to be atoned for
with the best article of blood your sys-
tenn could furnish. In the course of my
editing | made trouble with Mr.. Lord,
the editor of a rival paper. He flew
up about some little trihe or other that |
said about hint do not remember
now what it was. | suppose | called
him thief or body-snatchcr, or an
idiot, Or something like that; | was
obliged to make the paper readable, and
| couldn't fail in my duty to whole
community Of subscribers merely to
save the exaggerated scnsitiveness of an
individual.
Mr.. Lord was offended and replied
vigorously in his paper. Vigorously
means great deal when it refers to a
personal editor in frontier newspaper.
Dueling was all the fashion among the
upper classes in that country, and very
few gentlemen would throw away the
opportunity Of fighting one. 70 kill
one man in duel caused man to be
even more looked up to than to kill ten
men in the ordinary way. Well, out
there if you abuse man and that man
did not like it. you had to call him out
and kill him, otherwise you would be
disgraced. SO ] challenged Mr. Lord,
and | did hope he would not accept
but | knew perfectly well that he did
not want to fight, and so | challenged
bin in the most violent and implacable
manner. And then / sat down and
snuffed and snuifed till the answer came.
All the boys--the edtors-were in the
Office "helping" me in the dismal bust
ness, and telling about duels and dis
cussing the code with lot Of aged ruff
fans, who had experience in such mat
tiers, and altogether there was loving
interest taken in the affair that made me
unspeakably uncomfortable The an
swer came-Mr. Lord declined. Our
boys were furious, and SO was |, on the
surface.
| sent him another challenge, and
another, and another, and the more he
did not want to fight. the more blood
thirsty / became. But at last the mans
tone began to change. He appeared to
be waking up. 1t was becoming appa-
rent that he was going to fight me after
all. | ought to have known how it
would be-he was man who never
could be depended upon. Our boys
were jubilant. | was not, though tried
hard to be.
1t was now time to 90 out and prac-
tice. 1t was the custom there to fight
duels with navy shooters at fifteen PAGES
load and empty till the game for the
funeral was secure. We went to little
ravine just out Of town and borrowed
barn door for target-and we stood
this barn door up, and stood rail on
end against the middle of it to represent
Lord, and put squash on top Of the
rail to represent his head. He was
very tall, lean creature, the poorest sort
of material for duel nothing but
line shot would fetch him, and even then
he might split your bullet Exaggera-
ton aside, the rail was a little too thin
to represent the body accurately, but
the squash was all right If there was
any intellectual difference between the