Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1876-09-09
Mr.. Smiths Boy.
ms STARTLING STATEMENTS ABOUT Ms EAA
LY.

Smith has recently novel 10 ueIn""'"'""'
and Mr. Browns bog on Saturday, leaned over
the fence and gave to our reporter his i'm
pressious Of Mr.. Smiths boy, lad about
fourteen years old;
Yes. me and lin are right well acqnaiut-
cd now he knows more'n do, and he's had
more experience. Bill says his father usei 10
be robber Smith by the way, Is deacon 10
the Presbyterian church, aud a very excellent
hWyer.l aud that he had Sl0,00O,0OO "a 60"
buried in lis cellar along with whole lot oi
human bones, people he's killed. And Ice
saws his father is cnnjnrer, ard that be
makes all the earthquakes that happen any
where in the world. The old maull cone
home at night. after there's been an clr'h-
quake. an covered with sweat. and so tired
he hiu hardly stand, Biz says lis such La'd
work.
"And Bin toe me that once when man
came round there trying % sell Iishluine-rois
lis father got mad AMI ct him, ct him night
up. and he takes bites out Of everybody be
comes acrost.
That's what Bill tells me. That's all /
know about it. And he tole ne that once be
used IN have do.. one Of these little kind Of
,o,s. and he was Gyiug Ii, kite, and just for
fun he tied the kitc-,tring onto the dogs tail.
And then the wind struck her and his dog
went boomiu down tie street, with his hiad
/ lees il. the air for about mile, when the klto
/ 90 Of a sudden begun To 60 up, and IN about
4 minute The dog was fifteen miles high, and
commanding view Of California, and Egypt
and Oshkosh. think Bill said lie came
down. anyhow. know, in Brazil, and Bal
sand he swum home all the way in tie Attain
tic ocean. aud when be landed his legs was all
uibblel oh hy sharks.
Il wish f,tuerd buy me a dog, SOS could
scud him mp that way. Bot never have 10
lax. Bill said that where they used to live
he went ont on the roof one day 10 fly biz
Kite. and he sat on top Of the chimbly 10 give
her plenty of room, aud while lie was sitting
there thinking about nothing, tie old man
rut a kca of powder down below in tie iilc-
place E, clean tie SCOT out Of tie chjmhy.-
And when Le touched her Of Bill was bowcd
over agm tie Baptist church siceple, and le
landed ON the wcathercock, with his pants
torn. aud they couldn't git him down fr three
days. so be hung there, going round and
round with the wind, aud lie lived there by
eating tie crows. that came and sat on bin
because they thought he was made Of sheet
iron and put up there on purpose.
Hes bad more fun than enough. lie was
telling me the other day about sausage
suffer bis brother invented. II was a
kinder machine that worked with a tIeadlc; !;
and Bill said the way they did 10 tie fall was 10
fx ito the hogs back, aud connect tie tea4ic
with string, aud then the hog'd work tie
,rcadlc aud keep on running it up and down
until the machine cut the hog all up fine, anl
showed the meat into the skins. Bill said bis
brother called it Every Hog his Own Suffer
audi worked splendid But don't know.
Pears to mes if there couldn't lie no machine
Ike that. But, anyway, Bill said So.
And hc to'e me about an uncle or bis out
in Australia, who was ct by biz oyster once,
aud VIXEN be got inside be stat there uhlii he'd
ct the oyster. Then he split the she'll open
and took bali one ior a boat, and lie sailed
a oug until be met a sca scrpaut, and be killed
it and dravcloG It's skin, atd when lie got
bon G he sold it to an engine company ior a
hose. fr $4,000 to put out res with. Bil
said tnatwas actually So, because he could show
me man who used to Lcloug To tie engine
company. wish htherJ let ne out to fnd
q sea.serpaut Ike that; but he don't let ne
have no chance to distinguish myself
" Bill was saying only yesterday that The
Iudaus caught him once ard drove eleven
railroad spikes through bis stomach, and cut
of biz scalp, and i, never hurt him Bit
lie said be got away by tie daughter Of The
clief sucakiug him oct Of tie wiswam and
lending him horse. Bin says she was iu
love with him. aud when | asked him 10 Jet
me see the holes where they drove IN them
spikes lie said he darspt take OF bis clothes
or he'd bleed to death lie said bis own father
didn't know it, because Bill was afoid it
might worry the old man
And Bill tolc ne they wasn't going TO got
lin to 60 10 Suuday-school. lie says bis "a
ther has a brass idol that lie keeps in tie gar
ret, and Bill says he's made up bis mind to
be pagan, and to begin to 60 naked and car
~ ton.ahawk and bow and arrow, as soon
as the warm weather comes. And to prove
it t. NE lie says Bis father has tLis town all
underal with uitro-glyceriue, aud as soon as
be get. ready he 5 going to blow tie old thing
out aud bust her up, let Ler rip and demolish
her. lie said so down at tie dam and ,olc me
not to tell anybody, but ! thought they'd Le
no harm 10 mentioning Il to you.
And now believe must lie going. |
hear Bill a-wbistling Maybe les got some
thing else to tell ne"
The Smith boy. we think, will be profitable
to the youth Of this community.
"
4 A father may turn bis back on lie child
brothers aud sisters may become inveiera'o
enemies; husbands may desert their wiyes,
wives their husbands but motEer's love
- .t.-.,,,L I'll I, GOOD renufe Ia had