National Republican., 1876-12-14
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CURIOSITY SHOP.
Preachers are not all bad men.

CURIOSITY SHOP.
, Preachers are not all bad men.
The coming man is Santa Claus.
This Essipof Of Russian weather.
T,. third river in Scotland is the
--Kru,o, mploys IS, 500 men in cannon.
| making.
| Short ,e,,, 'ers are known as local
| brevities.
There are sss a 'ls-beg pardon, young
| ladies-at Vassar.
--Insuring oil pairtins Is a sort of pic
ture-risE business.
Politicians take ezercis. how by jump
ing at conclusions.
Barbara Frietchiefs houa is slowly
turning into -eanes.
The time to catch tie Krupr- when
its blowing big guns
sickIy over q pale east of;thouyks.
The Berlin gorilla is said to shake
hands on parting wtth It's physicfon.
The prodigal sons father revealed his
affection by killing tbs fatted calf Hs
All Pin is under arrest for theft in
Frisco, It is q sin to steal, All Pin.
Turkeys are stuffed in life, and stuffed
after death; with them 1t b all stun.
When does 3 man cut small figure at
dinner partyf When hesa little s..
The Colorado House Of Representa-
tives has woman for enrolling clerk.
When the employees on trains coiEd
ing are all killed there is no one to blame.
Mine Choctaw Indians are about to be-
come pupils at Roanoke College, Salemy Va:
Brown county, Texas, takes the ban
ner. She turned out s2o, 900 wOrthof peanuts this
There are lawyers and lawyers. The
latter are sound on the law, and the former are
all sound.
@Sportsmen, attentionI They say that
myriads Of wild ducks can be found on James
river now.
Last remark in very many households
I'If do not return. consider that I'Tebeent
the theatre"
Shakespeare in horticulture: ''That
which we eaullfowsr BY any other name would
smell as sweet"
Fools snd their money soon part. RS
worth while being fool to have the money to
part with, though.
Stokes Is not stickler for squatter
sovereignty in the real estates of this world. He
says he wants no Mansfield.
Peter Cooper says to the other candi-
dates: See what trouble You have made for tho
country oy running against me-"
The Snowman who said he had the
skeleton Of q fine minstrel organization under
way had only engaged the bone player
AN iliterste correspondent, who is
given to sporting, wants to know when the SAN
glS-sax0n race" so much talked about, is coming
-'Ps," inquired an uptown boy,
"what is sage4nN "a sage nv son. q" replied the
father gloOmily, 50 sage Is man who never mar
Probabilities when YOU see a man
going home al 2 o'clock in the morning. and know
his wife is waiting for him, it is likely to be
stormy.
Reno, Nevada, has monthly revenue
Of 300 for gambling license. It is suggested
that the ought to be made z in the name Of
the town.
-Four men in England were indicted
for stealing beans. "What have they been
the clerk.
The man who goes around with a
check to be csshed Just as q European steameris
starting appears to have been doing lively busi-
ness this season. -
Come over here, Tim," cries little
ny ma won't let me-" Voice nom over the way:
"Run away, den, Tim"
An itinerant bookseller called a. q
works unsucces.fuiiy. said. sHers sir, Is Bible;
first rate book; full Of useful Information"
A sailor, dropping in at st. Johns
church the other morning, suggested that "those
He undoubtedly referred to q choral reef. '''
The other day q man sued, out West,
glsss-eye. he said she had suppressed the truth,
which was as bad as suggesffo false eye.
"A rather curious device was recently
introduced into church social, near Rochester.
A prize of $40 was offered to the gentleman
bringing the largest number of young ladies.
Surprise is said to be the essence of
wit, but It is dif1cult to make a married man be-
ieve 1t after he has put three shirts and found
that there isn't collar button on any Of them.
isn't it gay, says Splkins, just as you
get settled warmly into bed one Of these zero cold
has forgotten to turn of the water in the cellar
In the French exhibition of 1878
there will be an Arctic department. in which all
the relics Of Arctic explorations will be collected
as well as all public documents relating to the
subject.
They do say that New York firm
which shipped lot OF extra-large ear-muFs to
Detroit last week. got them all back by the next
train, with the remark that there was no call for
so many ''children's Sizes"
"A subscriber wrote to Berks county
editor, asking show to remove clnkers from
stoves" The editor had to ask his wife what sort
moved, before he could reply.
"A grammarian thinks theatres should
be built with "plenty Of egresses to get in and out
Of" So they should. But until the fifteenth
srsss into theatre at all. much less out i ofis.
The dead beat warmly welcomes the
New Year, as it affords him an opportunity the
night before to sponge for an extra number Of
drinks, under the plea that on the morrow he
intends to "swear orr and turn over q new leaf.
The intelligent compositor who was
handed some copy reading that 'Leapyear ladies
are all looking downcast for husbands" and set
ssp up get anG
retire.
Husbands of scholastic habits can gen.
orally put up with good deal around the house;
find his wife stewing apples and utilizing his
latest volume of Appleton's Encyclopedias for q
pot lid.
-Rolling-pins were not used in New
England till ls01 and hatirons were not in vogue
till 1870, and the question how woman expostu-
lated with her husband before that time has be-
come matter of great speculation and historical
research.
The bull-doze cocktail has lust made
its appearance at the fashionable bars. Youmust
tilt about teaspoonful of water into the glass
and Immediately intimidate It with as much
whisky as the glass will hold Then when the
count is made throw the water out.
1t was an ex-M. c. Of the Forty third
Congress, from Tennessee, who fell among some
of "them literary fellers." "Jedge," inquired
aray's?" The ledge" hesItated, grew red in
the face. and replied in his pomPous drawl;
"Waal, ] think like fourth volume best"
The fat hog Is the connecting link be-
book agent, though the odds are rather in favor
of the latter. A book agent who could not con-
vey the impression that he wrote the book of
Proverbs, the Junius letters and the Declaration
of Independence, might still lie very respectfully
about the weight Of . fayorfte pig.
When he invited her to mary him, she
gazed into his face and tenderly inquired If he
knew what q costly thing he had asked fora
woman's life, o woman's wondrous love. Four
months after the wedding he climbed through
the scuttle on to the roof, and when q neighb0r
came with a ladder to take him down. he put it TO
him, as q fellow creature, whether It wasn't o
mans duty to run when o woman rose up after
him with q hot tea-kettle In her hand.
From Gibraltar we have report of q
very interesting match between eighteen men Of
the marine artillery with Gatling gun and
similar number Of men from the rifle brigade
with rifles. They formed at 800 yards from the
ffror M me md thau