The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-02-11

have had longer pull at the fireworks,
and plenty of time to make things lively
most all the week.
Some Saturday when you are In the
kitchen and the hired girl has just shined
up the knives, when she turns her back
you mustn't dip them one at time in
the vinegar jug, because If you do the
chemistry will turn 'em black, and then
you might have to go careless down to
the back fence to get out of the way of
some hot water or something.
When you see boy with a splinter
new overcoat on as fits him, and is real
tailor-made, and you haven't got
any overcoat yourself, and it's ON
awful cold day, and You want his'n, that's
envy. But you can't help it when you
aint Christian.
Your father would never pay twelve
dollars for big dictionary for you in q
hundred years, but if you was to win
J one in hard spelling match, he would
make you study it nights till you nearly
went crazy. That's always the way.
When your mother is frying dough-
nuts, and you're hungry, it don't make
any difference how her hair is combed,
or if it is combed at all or not just only
tell her that she looks so handsome with
her hair done up in that way, and she
VIII feed you on hot doughnuts till you
swell up like toad.
" hen sack of peanuts gets busted
on day and split out on the street,
and your pockets don't hold many, be-
cause they're nearly full of other things,
then a daily newspaper would be good
thing to have, and would be useful.
Why is the world like your father
This is a hard conundrum, which you
might just as well give it up. Because
the world is round always, like ball
but your father is round only of Satur-
day afternoon early, just when you don't
want him, and when the circus in the
stable has only just commenced.
"Fll Pay You for That"
A hen trod on ducks foot. She did
not mean to do it, and it did not hurt
much. But the duck said, "I'n pay
you for that" SO the duck few at the
hen; but, as she did so, her wing struck
an old goose, who stood close by. "Iu
pay you for that - cried the goose, and
she few at the duck; but, as she did so,
her foot tore the fur of cat, who was
just then in the yard. "I'll pay you for
that % cried the cat, and she flew at the
goose; but, as she did so, her tail
brushed the eye of a sheep, who was
near. "Ill pay you for that" cried
the sheep, and he ran at the cat; but, as
he did 50, his foot hit the foot of dog,
who lay in the sun. "I'll pay you for
that !" cried he, and he ran at the sheep;
but, as he did that, his leg struck an old
cow, who stood by the gate. "1'll pay
you for that ~ cried she, and she ran at
the dog; but, as she did so, her horn
grazed the skin of horse, who stood by
a tree. "I'l pay you for that !" cried
he, and he ran at the COW. What a run
there was The horse flew at the COW,
and the COW at the dog, and the dog at
the cat, and the cat at the goose, and the
goose at the duck, and the duck ut the
hen. What noise they made to be
sure eli, hi What is all this ~
cried the man who had the care of them;
81 cannot have this noise. You may
stay here" he said to the hen. But he
drove the duck to the pond, and the
goose to the field, and the cat to the
barn, and the sheep to his fold, and the
dog to his house, and the COW to her
yard, and the horse to his stall. "I'll
pay you for that !" said the man.-Me
Nursery.