The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1876-06-28

Here is an anecdote told by one
minister about another. A certain
presiding elder, who was noted for be-
ing seldom up to time, seldom. very
animated, and seldom very brief, once
kept congregation waiting lof long
time for bis Appearances, and when at
last he did come, he presched them a
very prosy sermon Of unusual length,
on the text, "Feed my lambs." He
had not yet finished, when that origin
al old minister, known as Camp
Meeting john" rose from seat in
the congregation, aud said: Brother,
j have had s)me experience in rails
ing lambs myself and / have found
that the following rules are absolutely
essential to. successful lamb raising
First, give them their food.in season !;
second, give them little at time !;
and third, give il to them tOarm."
A family employed girl
to do housework. The mistress Of
the house observing that her new
"help" was much addicted to Methodist
hymns, asked her if she belonged to
that church.
NO" she replied, mot exactly a
member; but | have been took in on
suspicion p
Probation, you mean."
"No, don't-in a sharp accent,
and with dogmatical manner, I.
know what | mean was took in on.
suspicion" ~ .slang stsi
During the recent meetings some
handbills were printed in one of the
neighboring towns eheaded "Hol for
the New Jerusalem" It seems that
one Of them got over into SALISBURY
and created considerable excitement
there, as most of the prominent citi-
zens have been writing to ask where
, the place is situated, and whether if
man went there to work by the day
he would be able to get home Sun
days. So a
A Pennsylvania has bought a
small steamer, and will load it at
Buffalo, about July 1st, with 10000
pounds of nitro-g lycerine, for delivery
at different localities on Lake Superb
or Ifthe little fishes in Lake Supe-
rior don't wonder what the ''rumpus'' !
is before the end Of that voyage, we
shall lose our faith in ro-glycerins
as an explosive.
Spilkins has discovered that his
stepmother has cousin whose daugh-
ter married man that has half
brother living in Philadelphia in
large, roomy residence quite near to
the Centennial Grounds. Proper steps
have been taken to establish the rela-
tionship, and Mrs. Spilkins has order
ed three new Saratoga trunks accord
ingly. Z
Many of the female clerks at Wash.
ington once ranked with the aristocra.
cy of the land. Among them may be
found widows or daughters of army
and navy officers of the highest rank,
daughters aud granddaughter of for.
mer members of the Cabinet, Senators,
Supreme Court Justices and Presi.
dents.
A book on the cage of Elizabeth"
is announced by New York house.
Elizabeth isn't the only woman about
whose age there has been much dis.
eussion; but we believe she is the only
one whose age has been considered a
matter of snch importance as to war
rant the publication Of book about
it.
When Rochester policeman orders
corner loafer to move on, the loafer
takes of his hat,- strikes an attitude
and replies; Sadly do / again take
up the weary burden of my life.
leave you in regret, but not in anger.
Heaven smile on you and bless you.
Farewell" Then he moves.
She was q young lady from New
York, and when he asked her if she
would partake of an ice-cream, she
gently answered, "If it's good square
eSnfectioner's cream, I'm there; but
fits strawberry festival slush, count
me out"
Madam" said trance medium,
"Your husbands spirit wishes to COM
municate with you. mo NATTER
said the widow ''if he's got no more
spirit in the other world than he had
in this, it's not worth bothering
about"
Mamma asked a precocious young
ster at the tea table the other eve
ming. after long and yearning gaze
towards plate ofdoughnuts, Mamma,
do you think | could stand another of