The New York herald., 1876-10-01

guic" TO multiply grace ana peace, ana 70 uivoe
by "giving to him that askeih OF thee.
A preacher lately said that The Church Is simply
hospital for invalids II IL be living Church, how
ever, aad does rs work well II very becomes
institution for convalcscens The Church ought not
TO be graveyard where sinners are buried, but an
asylum where the dead brought to life.
In certain minds there exists deporabe confusion
to &c value of important Church
dogmas. II is better, they think, TO make fatal
bundcr about them than TO confess ignorance "My
dear madame. said bashiul clergyman 10 ono OF his
most conservative parishioners. "what arc your i'm
pressons tho awful dogma total dcprav!tyf shc
guzcd blankly into the theological face Tor moment
and then, with smile that chidliko and bland
replied :-..welI STR think II Is II good doctrine
enough, but, for my part, nnd 1t hard to live up 70
| it," Some Of tho rest OF u.s. however, lind It moro
| difficult to live up IL.
It's satisfaction 20 know that while. as general
rule, men are given 10 exaggerated estimation OF
themselves there is here and there who does not
think of himself highly than he ought TO think
Last week youth OF fortune, who spends most Of
his timo in discovering nolhing to do said with
sigh, "Uncle, think cut out for ioacr." The
wise man looked at the boy and replied, John,
think every man ought to make his peculiar calling
election sure and my impression is that Whoever
cut you for = oacr understood his business right
weL'
1t is seriously argued by the followers OF MI Huxley
that the earlier gifted In mathematics, ana
In lou OF states. which u modern conirivance,
used the ground 20 do their sums ON. They say that
tho records prove this, because John Milton, In his
FIRST book OF Genesis that men multiplied on
tho face OF tho earth" II they multiplied they must
have been mathematical. This Is one oi the bottom
| facts OF the theory Of evolution.
| Mr Talmage not TO havc high regard for
the fashionable gentlemen who talk small talk to per-
lection. His nguage concerning them Is much moro
forcblo than choice, and Is not IL is hoped to bo re-
garded fair specimen OF his pulpit style He
recently said In sermon, It would take 500 OF them
siewed down to make teaspoonful OF calfs foot
Jely.n Hero is chance for Henry Bergh to show his
and prevent this constant cruelty 10 animals on
| the part Of the Tabernacle preacher.
However Henry A. Wise may be looked upon A. q
| politician he certainly said wisc things while
suffering his last illness 1t will do harm TO whis-
per his advice TO his into the ear OF larger audi
once ce:-"John, there s but one test OF anything and
that is It right II II snt turn away from it," He
called wise but otherwise by the abohtopsts
when he caused the execution OF John Brown, but
these last words OF hrs turbulent life show that his
name not quite misnomcr
| Captain Cameron who has had q largo experience
African explorer, says that the best way 10 get
among savaRes Is TO treat them Ike gentlemen. He
i
barbarians human boings, and acted accordingly
Tho savage broast appreciates kindness, and gentle
word small present is better Tor tho explorer than
a couple OF bayonets. The samo rule might possibly
/ work we'll In moro civilized qusrters. At any rnto
though the experiment might be q novel one to
people, II Is worth trial.
Some frantic man. who has just received tho benedc-
ton or paternity explodes his joy the arrival
| BY paraphrase Of Tenuyson.-
| Ring out Wild BELLS and tame ones, too;
Ring IN the little ale wo.sted socks;
There is considerable controversy in religious circles
about the proper length Of Tho clergy have
an abb ding impression that they can themselves
Interesting indefinite period but tho aity in
sst that thirty minutes is long they TO have
their Gins talked about Hero Is a model sermon, to
| which we add amendment, and which is not copy
| righted. Text, Kings, H., 13-17-"Shoot.' FIRST
find your game. II you are sufficiently acquain ted
with the locality this will not be difficult Second,
get ready. Practise in theological shooting gal
lery aud become accustomed the best kind Of ex-
plosives THIRD, aim not peoples heads but
right at them; breast high is good rule. Fourth
| fire. Don't shut your cycs as timid people do, and
do not fear the reco the shape of pcws to let II
you happen the bulls eye. In conclusion, pick
| up tho game. Never leave bird with broken wing
on tho field. Bo to bag what you have killed.
| Amen.
The arithmetic OF immortality is startling Too
much drink is said to be confusing that onos carly
education counts for nothing 1t thrce A. NJ, and
OF them staggered 10 hts fect saying ~ must 60
now promised be at home early, and here il
three O'clock TO- don't hurry" replied his comradc
"what is three O'Clock. pray among four OF uss"
The New York Tablet asserted some time since that
the morality OF Catholic countries would compare
| d.
various religious papers got into blaze OF excite
ment and Indignantly denied the soft impeachment
whereupon the Tablet, wearing somewhat severe
SMILE insists the figures, which moro
than fair why not give them, or else accept tho
situaton2 The statistics to be had for the asking
and would be better to present the opposing columns
side by sido than time In cxaspcratng words
Controversy is the synonyme Of loss OF temper but
facts as Mr. Huxley says, ali give tho facts. and
| then we will subsidc.
Luther tolls the story OF great anniversary at which
all his emissarics reported to Satan. ~ let the wild
beasts loose" said one, "and a whole caravan OF
Christians were destroyed" "what OF that" said His
Majesty, stheir souls all saved" ~ drove tho
east wind against ship carrying mssionaries said
| another, land they were oil drowned s'what of
that said Satan, ''thcir souls oil saved" ~
got Christians to go to slccp, SAID third, and
then ha1 things all to myself" Then Satan shouted
ior 10y ana declared that the work going bravcy
| on.
! Literary men sometimes make very funny blunders
student in the Bangor seminary was wont to call the
Doxology tho sockdologer This facetous rrevvrcnce
toward time honored hymn took TO itselfa very hearty
revenge ono Sunday morning. when tho young man,
confused with the excitement of his first pulpt essay,
rose his place after Impressive sermon alic-
tion, and said Brethren will close these solemn
| services with the long metre Sockdologer.n
| Children are rcusoncrs beyond their years some
| times. This must have studied Spinoza somc
previous stage of its evolution, for a i've years he had
tho pantheistc philosophy at his tongues tip.
Listen.
"Mother, isn't bod everywhere"
'Certainy, my son."