The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-12-29
BHELx GOES INTO THE ART RUsT.
NESS.

AURORA, Ind. November 1S.-T
The Italians did not understand the
real canse of their depressed trade.
They thought to increase business by
employing salesman who knew all
about our language and customs.
"Uncle Billy" an aged negro, who
lived next door to their studio, first ex-
cited their admiration, and finally won
the love of their hearts by his well
known conversational powers. They
knew at once that lie was the man for
the place. Having been merely hang
ing to the skirts OF business of late years
saving wood ard whitewashing a
little-he readily entered into a con-
tract to peddle the images on the streets.
CncleBilly proposed to carry the figures
III bag. The Italians had never Of
fered them i'll that way to the art pat
rolis of Rome, and explained to him
that it would not do. They fitted him
up with a cellar-door on his head, after
the style III vogue in their own sunny
land, and placing the images upon it,
started him out. He had ali excellent
assortment of goods MichBI Angelo
vas there, standing beside sky-bine
pup with red tail and blue ears Cupid,
with a donble barelled shotgun was
taking deadly aim at the stomach OF
Mars; Columbus was on hand, like a
sore finger, pcering into the distance
after dry land there were dogs that
would have passed equally we'll for
hogs or sheep, and the Angel leading
forth ST. Peter. With this exhibit OF
GIecian and Roman mythology, his
tory, poetry, &c, Uncle Billy turned
into Main street. lie did not manage
the board with any particular grace OF
skill. Indeed, it required great excr-
ton on his part to hold it or his head
at all, and keep it from humping a.ains,
the heads of other people. With a
gravity befitting his new found position
ne passed along the street loudly call
ing attention. To his merchandise
'sCPar de track, ladies and gen'l'men
TO- de oPest sho' now trablin'. HeaIl
Nations am Centennial Exhibition OF
wheels, an no mistake. | is Captain
an mate of dis new an elegant side
wheel steamah, an anything on d,
hurricane root goes to- dc 'nifficant sun
oh fifteen cents. If you don't see wha
you want, ask TO- it. No trouble t,
sho' goods. Heah we hab Nepolea
Boneps't crossing dc Delewah Christie
fah Columbus de Great; Mars Be
Butler de beautiful an accomplishet
Miss Venus de Rose OBJ Sharon an i
Lily OBJ de Valley. Fifteen cents IA
dc price oh mission, am one ticke
'nits you TO all de tents. is don
gone right down 20 de bottom figgal
am go toolin'. White folks, you hea
what says, an you want to ante u
wild de doocats."
, s'Oh, pull down your vest 70 yelled
boy from the other. side of the street.
Uncle Billy turned around to admin
lister a rebuke, and in doing so ii
board on his head jostlcd vioIentl
against pile of goods boxes. Thel
, was tremendous rattling OF the pla
ter images as they toppled over one III
! on another. Said Uncle Billy, as
; held the board firmly on his head
, prevent further disaster:
II bet million dollahs dat de berl
/ ole scratch is to pay up dar 'mong N
/ gods an chicken fixin's."
} Notakers.
3 "An' all on count OBJ dat low-fiun
chile dat hollah Pull down yo' vest
t Jes' wait till kotch yon, honey, a
3 you bet Yo' sweet life dis uiggah pu
!. down yo' vest cl'ar down to de grouI
g If't want dat Use got too much respe
l TO- George Washington, de Lord I
e Hosts an a few mo- good people on n
6 head, I'd broke eb'ry blam' bone in y
e body right hyar. Now. yo' heard J
= ole uncle quote Shakspeah !"
f He turned carefully around then, Al
Q started back to tie manutactory tor
= pairs, only remarkiDg:
Q "Dey's some child'en in dis town
hadn't ought to hab a monffnl to c
fo' de nex' fo' bundled yeahs -