The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1876-07-07
A Great Gun.

| Inc door gradually opened, and tlrst q
head-a remarkable head-and then a
wonderful red necktic, and then Marseillcs
vest entered.
"Hope you IRE very well, sir" said he,
taking seat as though he was afraid sun
dry needles were hidden in the cushion.
Hope yer well, sir; and am your ODE
dicnt servant, Hiram /. Lover, sir. You
can leave out the in your notice, sir, for
printers don't like capital I's?"
He moved little restlessly in the chair,
and kept tapping his left knee with roll
of fools-cap paper that looked like the
manuscript of a drama.
II came to see you sir" and you came
out with so great an effort at emphasis we
felt complimentcd II came to see you
for the purpose of letting you and you
alone into my wonderful invention.
You and the people of this city, sir,
have heard of the "Nameless Force" and
have not seen its workings, and therefore
you are all doubters. So am |. We have
advanced too far in natural philosophy
and dynamics to be dupcd easily. | don't
come here to trille with you in that way.
"Now, sir, what is the range of our larg-
est cannon? Six miles! Good. And the
largest calibre Of our heaviest gun? About
thirty inches Good. Now come to my
plan. | have a Sun-or that is, am going
to have onc-of forty inches bore. That's
II big gun amt its The engineers have
made fatal error i'll the past in supposing
cannon were only made to shoot shot and
shell. No such thing, sir. And why :?
Because we can get range of eight thous.
and miles just as easily as siX--and have
done it.
"To resume, sir. | make my big gun
forty inches calibre. l load it heavily,
and, as IL missed, | charge it with another
cannon, whose outside diameter is forty
inches. This second cannon has Il bore
OF thirty inches, and into it | load an
other, still smaller, with Il bore of twenty
inches. Into my third gun ram another
OF tcn-inch bore, and again into this one
of five, and the last gun l load with a
heavy chargc-a steel she'll
Now, what occurs We adjust the
friction primer of our big gun. We clear
the crowd away, and we elevate it forty
five degrees and pull. Bang she goes,
oil, and the charge sends the second gun
six miles OH its way. Now my invention
comes i'll. When that second gun has
reached six miles and feels like dropping,
the time fuse i'll lis vent sets it of, and
bang it sends the third gun six miles more
All goes ON lovely now. When this third
gun gets to the twelvc-mile post It's own
precious time fuse is alight, and hang it
goes, and, skrimmaging through space, il
sends the fourth six miles more.
Nov my boy" said he, getting Gmil-
lar, when this little fellow huns along his
six miles, bang again it lots Off and my
fifth gun scoots through its arc until it
sees its six miles over And now the
little iive-inch fellow is blown out, going
like lightning. 1t gets to its six miles
end, and there is liz and another bang,
and my steel shot goes speeding on its Joy
full way six miles further.
1--WE have calculated our aim by pri-
mary geography, and we know exactly
where that shells going to hit. And now
look back and See what we've done. The
second gun was shot six miles; it shot the
third six miles-that's twelve; that shot
the fourth siX-that makes eighteen; that
shot the fifth six-that's twenty four; that
shot the shell six-that's thirty-tha range,
my dear sir, of the smallest gun. Don't
you see2 Amt there figures and they
don't lie.
"Whcn Secretary Robson buys my idea,
I'm going TO build cannon to shoot around
the world. "-N6to Orleans Bulletin.