, 1876-06-18
HuM0R.

Wales will not visit the Centennial, but Olive
Logan will visit Wales.
Basuues are still worn by young ladies, and
they are cuirass usual.
NouF Mutual Friends" In New York
played the Dickens with the Chicago Club
Thursday last.
IMAM in Chenango County, N. T.. has q
hencry that cost $1,000. BROOKLYN has Henery
that costs s25,ooo year.
The "Grcat Unknown of the Democratic
party: An 1rishman In New York that isn't a
first cousin Of the late A. T. Stewart.
A colored delegate at Cincinnati said he
wished for "Dore's pen dipped in the sunlight
OF heaven to write honor upon Morton.'
so iver!" is what he was thinking Of proba-
bly,.
Dom Pedro won the hearts Of 5000 factory
girls Of Lowell, Mass, at his recent visit to the
Spindle City. He said he saw more to admire in
that city than any other place he had visited.
And now every girl thinks she was the object Of
his admiration.
Several young ladies on the West Side, who
were the owners Of Centennial stockings,
missed them from their bureaus lately. The
mystery was explained when one Of the ladies
saw her little brother and eight other little
brothers in an open lot playing the national
game, arrayed in the identical stockings. Those
boys will hare to paint their legs NEXT week
when they play the return match, SO that their
opponents won't suspect their mishap.
:. ~ FUN-GLEANINGs.
a man Of mfens: Tie physiognomist.
A hotel-ghost comes under the official head OF
inn-spectrcs.
If you arc in love, and don't know how to
make it known, goto your tailor. He will press
your suit for you.
"Giles, can you conjugate behaves =" "Be-
hayes-behooves-b -beehives-be--" See,
here! You 60 and stand In the corncr.n
John Henry woke up frorn terrible night
mare, last night, and remarked to his wife That
ttwns easier to sleep on springfield than on
spring chicken.
4 seedy-looking individual was heard to re-
mark to friend: "My dear fellow, can't you
lsnd me black weskit for time! My Aunt
Betsey died few days ago, and want to take
q short mourn.''
1t is strange" muttcred young man, as he
staggered home from supper party, show
evil communications corrupt good manners.
have been surrounded By tlmblers all the even
ing, and now am tumbler myself"
any dcar,' said Jones to Ills wife, If your
cousin comes in to-day, let the children play
with his umbrella. They might hide it SO your
boy) is beginning to understand ti]ial duty"
uu.,,,. ,, .e,-.a ,roocc,o,,, 1,,,,,o.+o- ,+
tho tca-tah1e the other ervenfnc AIR. - ionrand
rearnine sra roze w. toTan1 n nl5{e of donnhnuts
Il Mamma, do you think I could stand another
Of those fried holes 7" She thought he could.
a 3-yea1-old girl, Oracle, is very npt at ez-
VII, her fathcr % to n3;i~ the cnw He cnde,vn75.
ed to dissuade her by telling her the old COW
would hook when she quickly rcjoined, Why,
usire one % ~ .' oei e:
Frederick the Great. Sald soldier one oay "
request for the brcvet Of L1eGtS@.nt. 1i you
say two," answered the King, II Will ns-7a yo1,
hanged" "sign," replied the soldier. InI
King stared, Whlstled, and signed.
Seven o'clock g. m.-Boy has terrible tooth
solitary fieufe NAV be seen sknllinr through
the streets leading to the creek; perch and club
dramatis persona, the old man. one trunk strap,
boy. Let's draw tic curtain.
Some persons have q nice wa7 Of putting
Who entered Restaurant Yesterday to eet his
dinner. and. beckoning the waiter to him. he
said: nTve forgotten my handkerchief; make
it rule never to get grease on my coat-tail, and
slah>', - '--0~' ~'> ''''0
tn oct excused from the i,ry-box. az can't uu-
dor6shtend goot Enr1ese !, H. said aWi,at did
he sayl'' asked tie Judge. II can't under
shtand goot Eng1ese, repeated the Dutchman.
sTake Your seat, cried the Judge; stthat's no
excrse: you need not be alarmed, as you arc not
TIre7v IL hear nm. .,'-New YORK. TTor{d
'1Ae.s - l.'-A' , ~
His mother nled mosqulIo yesteruay, ana
his eyes, that nave !ookea upon .ne .,f1 mot4 fn1
1our years, pellS tnG ms 4l;1, n-.an
m 90 home to her children. - be said after time,
RRT;i1 she9 They, also, will come out and bite
eome "n. one. and ind out why it was that their
1un1h Ton4fer uuee naver aas1 came home to them"
AuoIn't De ~ ''. l~,~.~ s,,. viva NV,
March OF intellect; beggsr, SONG tme ago,
applied for aims at the do9r o. paf1asan o. Inc
Anti-Begging SOCIETY n Eainnnlg ai.er iaaar IN
vain detailing his mannoiu sorroMs, me ihexor
able gentleman Pe'enptosllS n u,smissea asa u .nn'
&c 1%ax' sa'u ne, Te calina .l;od gI yg ie w.
thing" "1ou m1gnt' a. leasI.. p Iepheeta, { I'm, me
mendieant, with an ar q great o'enltS' nave
refused me grammatlcal'g'
A facetious scotchman some time ago took a
trip over to France, and astonishcd tic natives
put up IN Boalogne the ST. servants ~er9 n ne%'y y