The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1876-09-15

| WI" "'""Vi 'o-uay, Haihiy lCe cream anC
anything that can be eaten with n spoon i.
quickly finished"
Yes, give me ice cream, let everything
be made of ice. Happy must that man be
who owns all ice house; Que could sit in i,
and defy the thermometer. Now is the
time to read up arctic history, to muse upon
polar beas, frozen crews and ice-bound
ships" AT this juncture of MIR. Golfers re.
marks Bridget put her head in at the door
and sententiously announced: 'grhe man
for the trunks if you please, mum"
Very well, Bridget, they are all ready
tell him to leave the checks, and then bring
up the ice cream, we will have it served at
once"
The domestic retired, and Mr.. G. sat star
ing at his wife in speechless amazement.
You know, john" began Mrs. Golfer
sweetly, 81 would not do anything without
your approval, but it was so very warm this
morning, and felt sure it would be such q
charming surprise to you to find how quiet
iy and well | had managed the whole affair,
not troubling you so much as to strap a
trunk, or turn off the gas. And when the
| getting ready which you seem to have such
horror OF, was quite finished, Just sent
Bridget around to the express Office with an
order to call for the trunks, and now they
are gone you have nothing to do but to fol-
low them. Are you not pleased, and am /
not clever little woman ?"
tVary alavar ;,Jool Ii
ed Mr.. Golfer, "but really, don't see in
what way | have been consulted in all this"
why, dear, am 1 not consulting YOU
no,U l'
"Yes, certainly, but then it looks very
much to me as if, like the man who wished
the loan If his neighbor's horse, you had
used the animal before asking to borrow it.
In fact am left no alternative in the matter
but to consent"
Nonsense, don't be ungrateful. Here
comes the ice cream, and if you would not
see it melt-vanish absolutely before your
eyes in the sufiocating atmosphere advise
you to dispose of it as expeditiously as pos
sible."
The bewildered John meekly followed
this sensible advice, but still he felt himself
injured.
VI am to dine on ice-cream it seems, find
linen duster hanging on the back of nv
chair, hear half dozen trunks drapged
down the stairs, see nurse and baby equipped
for travelling, and the house generally dis
manlled, all Of which proceedings am kept
entirely ignorant of until within the minute
of starting for-wherever it pleases your
fancy to go, and then l am calmly told, with
the serenity of an angel, that nothing is
ever done without my approval"
"Oh, you foolish John, how could it be a
surprise if you were to know all about it be-
forehand? men are so dull of comprehension
in some instances. feel certain that away
down in the very bottom of your heart you
are just as pleased as you can be, and know
that L am entitled to your thanks and think
kiss beside" laughed Mrs. Golfer, looking
so good and pretty that a Turk could not
have been angry with her for ten seconds if
all the rules of the harem had been violated.
MIR, Golfer yielded to her winsome way of
disarming him, like kind, good husband
as he was.
so you are my pet. How. hard you must
have worked this broiling day. You have
earned three kisses, one for each cheek and
the last and best for the sweetest m outh that
ever cajoled man out of his rights nd the
mastership Of his own house."
And thus in spite of himself, Mr.. Golfer
was off to the sea shore, blissfully uncon-
scious that his wife had been privately max
ing her arrangements for week, and knew
just when to put her plans into practice.
But then Mrs. Golfer was an excellent man
ager. .. ..... ... ... .. ...