The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1876-03-31
MARK TwAIN'S DUEL.
His Wonderful Escape.

"
to Tom Hoods Annual:
The only merit claim for the follow.
ing narrative is that it is q true story.
1t has moral on the end of it, but /
claim nothing on that, as it is merely
thrown in to curry favor with the relig-
lious element.
After had reported couple Of years
on the Virginia City (Nev. Daily Enter
lprise they promoted me to be Editor-in-
Chief; and l lasted just week by the
watch. But l made an uncommonly
lively newspaper while / did last, and
when retired L had duel OH my hands
and three horsewhippings promised me.
The latter l made no attempt to col
I1ect; however, this story concerns only
the former. 1t was the old s'flush times"
of the silver excitement, when the popu-
latlon was wonderfully wild and mixed;
. everybody went armed to the teeth, and
all slights ana insults had to be atoned
! for with the best article OF blood your
: system could furnish. In the course oil
my editing l made trouble with Mr.
Lord, the editor Of a rival paper. lie
flew up about some little trifle or other
that said about hin1--I do not remem.
ber now what it was. suppose ]
called him a thief, OF q body-snatcher.
or an idiot. or something like that; was
obliged to make the paper readable, and
l couldn't fall in my duty to whole
community OF subscribers merely to
save the exaggerated sensitiVeness of an
individual. Mr.. Lord was offended, and
replied vigorously in his paper. Vigor-
ously means great deal when it refers
to a personal editorial. in frontier news
paper. Dueling was all the fashion
among the upper classes in that country,
and very few gentlemen would throw
| away the opportunity of fighting one.
To kill one man in duel caused Ii man
to be even more looked up to than to kill
| two men in the ordinary way. Well, out
there if you abused a man and that man
| did not like it, you had 10 call him out
and kill him, otherwise you would be
disgraced. So l challenged Mr.. Lord,
| ana did hope he would not accept; but
| | knew perfectly well that he did not
| want TO tight, and So l challenged hfiSSa
] III the nacssS W0ient aud implacable man.
ner. And then sat down ana snufed
and snuHed till the answer came. All
the boys-the editOrs-Were in the Office
"helping" me in. the dismal business,
and telling about duels and discussing
the code with alot of aged rufians, who
had experience in such matters, and
altogether there was loving interest
taken in the matter that mane me un-
speakably uncomfortable. The answer
came--Mr. Lord declined. Our boys
were furious, and SO was / on the sur
| face.
sent him another challenge, and an
other, and the more he did not want to
| fight the more bloodthirsty | became.
But at last the mans tone began to
change. He appeared to be waking up.
1t was becoming apparent thai he was
going to fight me alter all. l ougat TO
| nave known how it would be--he was a
l mo n xtyhn annll ha 6nnnndnl
| Our boys were jubilant. | was not,
| though tried hard to be.
| 1t was now time to 60 out and prac-
| tice. 1t was the custom there to fight
| duels with navy siX-shooters at fifteen
| paces-lead ana empty tlll the game for
the funeral was secure. We went to a
rayine just out of town and borrowed a
barn uoer for . target-borrowed IL
from gentleman who was absent-and
we steod his barn door up, and stood a
rail Oh the end against the middle OF 1t
4 to represent Lora, and put squash on
top oil the rail to represent the head. He
was very tall, lean creature, the poor
i est sort OF material tor duel; nothing
but line shot could fetch him, and even
then he might split your bullet. EXag-
geration aside, the rail was, OF course,
a little too thin TO represent the body
accurately, but the squash was all right.
Ii there was any intellectual difference
between the squash and his head it was
in favor OF the squash.
Well, practiced and practiced at the
barn door and could not hit it; and L
practiced al the rail and could not hit
could not hit that. l would nave been
entirely disheartened but That OCCASION
ally | crippled one Of The boys, and thai
gave me nope.
At last we began to hear pistol shots
near by in the next ravlne. We knew
what that meant! The other party was
out practicing too. Then l was in
tbe last degree distressed, for of course
they would hear our shots and then send
over the ridge, and the spies would find
my barn door WiLhouta a wound OF mark,
and that would simply be an end TO me !;
tor OF course the other man would i'm
mediately become as bloodtAirsty as l
was.
just at that moment a little bird
no larger than a sparrow flew by and lit
ON bush about thirty PAGES away, and
my little second, Steve Giils, who was a
dead shot with pistol-much better
than | was--snatched out mis- revolver
and shot the BIRDS head of! We all ran
to pick up the game, and sure enough,
lust at TINS moment, some OF the oLner
duellStS came RECOMMENDING over the
little ridge. They ran to our group to
see what the matter was, and when
they saw the bird LORDS second said:
'.That was splendid shot. How far
off was itp'
Steve said with some indifference:
son, no great distance. About thirty
PAGES.
"Thirty PAGES! Heavens alive! Who
did it~
"My man--Twain."
s'rhe mischief he didl Can he do it
!oitenw
"Well, yes. He can do it about four
times ont Of tive.'
/ knew the little rascal was lying, but
i never said anything. never told him
SO. He was not ofa disposition to invite
condolences OF that kind, SO I let the
matter rest. But it was comfort To
see those people look sick, and see their
LAWS drop when Steve made that state.
iment. Tney went ot. and got Lord and
took him home; when we got home half
an hour later, there was q note saying
that MIR. LORD peremptorily declined TO
fight.
We found out afterward that Lord hit
his mark thirteen times In eighteen
shots-if he had put those thirteen bull
let's into me 1t would have narrowed my
4 onh ara of ,iaeft1Inasa n good deal. Irua