Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1876-10-13
UNCLESAMmY,s BOHMoOD.
The BOY RefnrmPr-The "Father {


The HOy- RefarmPr-The SFather OF
the Man."
While musing recently among the ruins
of Fort George | came across an elderly
man who had found a shady seat inside
the ancient earthworks and was quietly
smoking a discolored clay pipe. The old
man and his pipe had evidently seen better
DAYS, though not many hotter ones, as the
mercury indicated at least 100 in the shade,
and as he sat and smoked in sad, medita-
tive silence | took seat a short distance
from his right hand and opened CONVERSE
tion with him. Said he:
Il was borned in the town of New
Leb'non, Klumby County. n. Y. on the
'leventh day of March, 1916"
''Then YOU must have known Samuel j..
Tilden."
''0h, yes; knowned Sammy well. I'm
jest four days olde'n Sammy, but he was
too old for me onct."
''Ahi how did that happenY
''Wall, Sammy was a 81 Y chap, and wuz
alluz gittiu' us boys into scrapes, and leav-
in us to- get cut the best way we could, :
Sometimes he would contrive to get US lick
ed for what he was guilty of hisself, but
we never could prove nothin' agin him. |
remember how a neighbor of Sammy's faith
er had big patch of mushmilyons one year.
They %uz called nutmeg mushmilyons be-
cause they looked like nutmeg, but wuz
bout as big as your double fist. round as
an apples and sweet'erH honey. One day
Uncle Ike, as we boys called him, told us
to come over -inro the garding and help
ourselves, and Nose and Sammy Tilden
went with the rest on US. Arter we'd had
all we could eat, and wuz on our way hum,
Sammy suddenly spoke up, and says ne,
''Say boys, them wuz nice milyons; they
wouldn't be bad to take every day" eyes, .
says Nose, shut then the old man won't be
apt TO invite US to eat any more, fur he KIN
git 10 cents apiece fur 'em t the Lemon
Springs, and he can't afford to gin'em all
away to us boys fur nOthin."
That's sv," says Sammy, thoughtful
ike. Then he whistled an old tune called
American Taxashun." Wall, Sammy
whistled that ole toon, and then nothing
wuz said about the milyons till we come to
shady place, and all on US sot down to
play marbles, ATter a while Sammy spoke
u in lively sort Of way, and says he,
''Say, boys, it would be durn mean if any
body should go tonight and steal Uncle
Ike's mushmilyons, but I'm afraid they will,
cause you see'ths patch is ever so fur from
the holse, and Uncle Ike never keeps no
'Thatis eo," spoke up three or four OF
the Etealinest little rips in the hull party,
all to onet,
''Then Sammy he sung;
"I'll give true Teashun,
Attend TO what say,
Conearnin' the Taxashgn
OF North America
''Then he scythed, and says he, "Say
boys, this playin' marbles don't pay, We
can't make nathiR' at it, I've been think
in how't I'd like to 60 into the mushmil-
yons bizniz, | think l can affort to pay
three cents apiece for milyols, just like
them at Uncle Ike's and no questions asked.
If any Of you boys has any to sell tonight
bring 'em around to dads barn afore mid
night, and your pay will be ready. It's
c1oI then, and I'd ruther do bizniz about
'ieven at night than in the heat of the
day." --E.
THAT same night I. lot Of u; boys went
to Uncle Ille's and borrowed about two
bushels of mushmilyons and fetched 'em to
Tilden's barn, and sold 'em to Sammy for
three cents apiece, and Nose took 'em to
Leh'nOn Spring airly next mornin' and got
ten cents for every one of 'em. But Uncle
Ike missed 'em afore noon, and suspectin'
they had gone to the Springs, hltched up
his old bob-tail roam mare and went to look
'em up-and' sure enough, there they were
in back wood-shed all in q heap, just as
Nose had left EN-. Uncle Ike knowned
EN- cause he had cut the first letter Of his
name onto 'em and when he wuz told where
they como from, he drove over to Tilden's,
and says he-"Good mornin', Mr.. Tilden,
I've come on ruther a unpleasant bizniz. "
Then he cough1d.
Take a cheer, Uncle Ike, you seem ex-
zited-what's the matter? Hope my hogs
haint been heavin' yer taters-hope none OF
your cattle or horses aint sick; hope none
Of your folks aint dead.
''Matter enough" says Uncle Ike.