The Weston Democrat. [volume] (Weston, W. Va.) 1875-current, 1876-04-03
Items Of Interest.

A man eau make himself nS miserable
rs he needs to be by attempting to cor
rect all the evils in the world.
1t has been found that in nearly every
civilized country the tree TINT bears the
most fruit for market is the axle-tree.
According to the latest definition, q
bachelor is man who has lost the OPP
portunity Of making woman miserable.
Many persons have brought on serious
sickness by holding on to the knob Of
the front door while standing in draft,
and speaking "hst words to friends
or visitors.
"Wllat is n conscience" asked n
schoolmaster OF his class. San inward
monitor" replied bright little fellow.
"Aud what's n monitorl" Zone Of
the ironclads."
A man that will swear at tue pig that
neglected to eat the eacorns that grew the
trec from which camc tho refractory
piece OF oak he is vainly trying to split,
may be said to have gotten down to the
root OF the thing.
Let every man do his duty, this cen.
tennial spring, beginning by clearing up
MI such rubbish about his yard as old
boards, tin cans, broken bottles, hoop
skirts, superannuated bustlcs, dead
limbs, and caved-in' barrels.
An American in London has found
that waste beer and the musings OF beer
glasses arc soppcd or swabbed up with
rags, which are then squeezed and
made TO yield cheap drink to be sold
the next day to unsuspccting Britons,
A young lady dressed in much false
hair was warbling at the piano, and when
her mother summoned her to assist IN
some household duties, her rosy lips
opened poutingly and she snapped ont,
"Oh, do it yourseli!' And then she went
on singing : Kind words eau never
de-"
A few years ago you could sit up and
talk philosophy with girl all night
but now il you stay after ono or two
o'clock in the moraing the old people
begin to pound on the floor up stairs
for you to go. We don't mind it our
selves, but We can't help feeling for the
girls.
The people of Great Britain consume
on M average five and half bushels of
wheat annually per individual. The
number to be fed is about 81, 600, 900.
The crop the past year il estimated at
72,000,000 bushels. This opens q
demand for about 1000, 900 bushels
from other countries.
A Mexican girl has Just been discover.
ed with three wCll.developcd arms. Any
well regulated husband, contemplating
this singular freak OF nature, can't Int
reflect how convenient the third hand
would be to hold him in position by the
hair while the other two warmed his
jacket with q broomstick.
The franklin {Ky.) Patriot says:
We notice sGveuty-tive cents shirts ad-
vertiscd in our city exchanges. We
shall never insult our manhood by get.
ting into such cheap rag MS that. No
rather lot us continue to deceive m
unsuspecting public with paper collar
skillfully pinned to the crater Of O. close
buttoned vest.
Said q little boy to his mother the
other morning: "Aia, had the beautir
fullest dream last night you ever saw.
dreamt that wouldn't go to school aud
that you went ont into tho yard and cut
Il great long switch, but Just M you was
going to give me an awful dressin' tho
world came to IN end Didn't l get out
OF it easy, though %
A Santa Cruz county mans house
was recently robbed by three tramps,
who took quantity OF clothing. He
followed them several miles into tho
mountains, overlook them, and started
them back. Becoming tired Of watch
ing them, he tied them to trees, gavo
them sound thrashing, and them turn
ed them loose, one Mt time, and went
home rejoicing.
In the treatment OF burns in the chnri-
ty hospital, New York, when Of nrslIper-
ticial character, preparation consisting
Of two parts OF collodion aud ono of
olive oil has been found to be very ELI
cacious. When tho burn is OF au extern
sive character, gasoline proves Of de-
cided beIeft. The advantage OF gaso-
line is that it is Of tho right con-
sistence, aud does not become rancid.
About 2O,OOO,O00 tons OF coal are
mined yearly in Pennsylvania. In the
mines, uuwrought, it is worth fifty cents,
ton, or s1O,0OO,0O0; mined aud
brought to the surface, it is worth sl.50
n ton, or $50, 900, 600; ground, broken,
and placed on the cars, it is worth $3.50
ton, or $50, 600, 900; delivered at the
boundaries Of the State or on shipboard,
it is worth on an average $3.50, or
sll0.O 0.OOO, 600, which is the sum annually
paid to Pennsylvania for coal.