The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-02-17
APAIR OF sNORERs.
He Turned Out Old Man BulIard
and Then Turned in Himself.

He is huge, fat, good natured, and
very entertaining man. The pro
prietor of the lodging house was much
pleased with Bullard, and laugheda at
at his jokes the first evening Of his
arrival athis place till tears ran down
his cheeks. The men who were to
be Billiards. dominates also thought
well of him-that evening. The
next morning, however they went
to the landlord and told him that he
must find some other place for Mr.,
Billiard, as he was such a terrific
snorer that they couldn't stand him.
The landlords rooms were all occu-
pied, and he had noplace for Bullard
but just where he was The com
planning dodgers left, and in two or
three days two other men were put
into the vacant bed Billiard made
short of them; one night let them out.
The landlord sought an interview
with. Billiard, and reconstructed
Bullard stoutly asserted that he did
not snore-had never been known to
snore. The landlord found men to
take the beds, but again Billiard
cleaned them out in single night.
Growing desperate the landlord
again went to Billiard. He told him
he must either leave the house or
pay rent for all the beds in the room
-$45 per month. Billiard said
bargain was a bargain; he had paid
SIS for his bed, and he intended keep
ing it until his month was up, and
he didn't propose to pay for beds he
had no use for; he didn't snore, and
the man who asserted to the contrary
was a liar and a horse thief. The
landlord felt very much depressed af
ter this last interview with Billiard,
as he saw he was determined not to
be removed from his quarters, a
morning or two after, as Billiards.
landlord was going down town, he
saw standing in the door a brother
clearinghouse man.
"Thank heaven, he's gono!" said
the man, as Billiards. landlord came
up Thank heaven, Pm rid of him at
last?"
Grid ofwhom?"
"Why of the big fat man you see
yonder waddling down the street."
What of him?"
Enough of himl He drove nearly
every man out of my house before he
left. They wouldn't stop in the same
block.
"He's a good one, is hep"
"What that snorting Falstaflian
porpoise, sir"
"a good one! He's a perfect terror!
He's more different kinds of a snor-
er than any man l ever heard, and
every time he changes his key it is
for the worse. While I had him here
crowds were gathcringir front of the
house within, and the police came in
one night thinking some one was be-
ing murdered. My dog ran away,
and all the cats left the house, sir!"
"And the man you pointed out to
me is this snorer?"
ayes, sir, he is
Good day, sir!" and Billiards land
lord fastened down the street.
The next morning, with the first
peep of day, Billiard rushed into the
presence of his landlord.
"What are you trying to play on
me?" cried he; 81 never slept u wink
all night. Ofall the internal noises
| ever heard, that man in my room
got off the worst, Is he going to stay
there?
"Stay? of course he is, Hain't he
got the bed for month";"
"Then | leave!" and Bullard was as
good as his word,
An hour afterward, the man who
had ousted Billiard arose and waddled
screnely into the presence of the land
lord.
you've cleaned him out, said the
landlord. "You raised him; hc'sgo
for goodl' and the landlord glcely
rubbed his hands
"Now," continued the landlord, I'll
give you a good square breakfast, and
then you can 60"
GO" said the fat man; mot much
I don't. Didn't you say last evening
in the presence of Bullard and Il half
dozen others. that | was to stay here