Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1876-04-29
Mrs. Potts Dissipated Husband.

One night during the recent troubles i'm
the Pennsylvania coal regions Judge
Potts brother, Thomas Potts, was round
at meeting of the owners. anu after the
adjournment he stepped into tavern.
While there he met some friends, and in
the course of an hour Or two he got very
| intoxicated. On his way home he lost
his hat, and a miner who knew him, feel
| ing compassion for him, clapped on his
head a miners hat. and i'm order to make
the dark street look brighter he lighted
the lamp i'm front of the hat. When Potts
reached home bis wife had gone to bed
and the lights were out; but Potts fe't
certain that the lamp was burning i'm the
hall, but he couldn't for the life of him
| tell where it was.
| He looked at the regular lamp and it
| seemed to be out; then he hunted i'm ev-
cry direction for the light, but he was
unable to find it, although it seemed TO
shine brightly wherever he went. Pres
emily he happened to stop i'm front of he
mirror in the hat rack, and then SAW pre-
cisely where the light was. After Il brief
objuration upon Mrs. Potts for leaving
light in such place he Went up to the
mirror and tried TO blow it out. He blew
and blew. but somehow the flame burn
ed as steadily as before.
That" said Potts, lis the most extra.
Urinary lamps ever been my misfortune
t'encounter." Then he took off his coat,
and holding it i'm front of him crept eau
tiously up TO the mirror, and tried 70
crush the coat over the lamp, which still
burned brightly. He said:
.rh IT'S cer'inly very extraordinary
moz-'stonishin' eircumstanz ever come
un'er my observation. Domino how
t'count for it,"
1t occurred to him that perhaps he
might smash the lamp with an umbrella.
Selling the weapon he went up to the
hat, and aiming a terrible blow at the
light he brought the umbrella down.
lie missed, and smashed his Sunday hat
into chaos. He took aim again and caught
the umbrella in the lamp Overl ead. bring
ing it down with a crash. Then he tried
a third time, and plunged the ferrule
Of the umbrella through the mirror.
smashing it TO atoms; he felt eXultant for
moment as the light disappeared from
his vision, but he was perpleXed to find
there was another light somewhere, he
did not know exactly where. So he sat
down on the stairs and remarked:
sMoz' 'stonishin' circulnstanz ever came
un'er nv observation. Whaten thunder
doz it mean an'hOw? Lights gone, an
yet it's shinin! Perfectly incompre'nsi-
BILE! Wish t'gracious Mrs. Potts d wake
up and 'splain it. Durn f know what
had better do"
Then Potts took off his hat to scratch
his head in the hope that he might scare
up an idea, and The truth flashed upon
him. Gazing at the lamp for a moment,
until he had drank i'm full conception
of the trouble it had caused him, he sud
denly smashed it down on the floor in
rage. and extinguished it after covering
two yards of carpet with grease. Then
he vert to bed, and in the morning Mrs.
Potts informed him that some If those
awful miners had broken into the house
the night before and left one of their hats
with lamp. Potts turned over i'm bed
so that she could not see his face, and
said if the stern hand of the law wasn't
laid upon thuse ruffians soon nobody's
life would be safe.