The Republican journal., 1876-03-02
Letter from Washington.
WASHINGTON, Feb, 26th. 1877

kept" is outrageonsly horrible phlloso-
ply, but splendidly convenient usage
now and then AS, for instance, last
week, when 1 said to myself that this
week would tell YOU all about those
who would like to be President | certain
ly intended to undertake something of
the sort, and so make good my word.
But alas. like a great many, won't say
all Of the bad promises of this world, it
was made in the rashness of ignorance,
and the entire absence of prudence and
Judgment Though | actually did sally
forth one day, opera glasses in one hand
and notebook in the other, and wended
my way to the national repository Of wit
and wisdom, where ! had somehow got
an idea the majority Of these longing as
pirants We're to be seen, prepared with
the assistance of the one and the use of
the other to ''nothing eXtenuate," but set
down exactly the color OF the hair, the
shade OF the eve, and so far dip into what
Balzac terms ''noseology'' as to relate to
you truly whether that necessary and
handsome appendage OF the human face
had wandered to its owner down from
the fair, refined and classic land OF the
Greeks; or had come across seas from
the stiff, straight, and stately Romans; or
whether, pcrchance, it hadn't been accus-
toned to hobnobbing with either, but
was only common clay" after all, and
from too much reflection upon the ups
pugnacious over the fact, or acquired a
habit of turning up its nose at its more
aristocratic neighbors. But alas when
comfortably and conveniently bestowed
in the 9 national cave" gazing down
through all that terrible echoing space, it
all at once overcame me- and not exactly
like . Summer dream" either, that Her
cules had only Il little playful sport as
compared with the task before me. |
had, mctaphorically. struck upon rock.
My gallant little ship, rich treighted with
goodiy intentions, was succumbing to the
engulting waves of numbers. Who, where,
how many? | interrogated mentally, and
then fell rapidly, conscientiously and eco
nomcally to making calculations as to
how many reams o! foolscap would be re-
CURED to accurately describe all the will
INC and wi9tlul individuals who would be
only too happy to accept the honors, to
say nothing of house rent free. a salary of
$50, 900 per annum and sundries thrown
in from Uncle Sam. How many months
would be needed to write them all out
how many men, women and children to
put them in type? how many publishers
to issue double editions and extras? until
my fingers ached and my brain grew dZ-
zy, and | turned thoughtlully away, a
sadder ii not Il wiser individual than
when | ventured forth. Since then hours
have multiplied into days, and still the
work of calculation goes on, and ii ever Il
probable solution is arrived at, think |
can safely and prudently, and without
tear Of being obliged to break my word.
promise that | will narrate to YOU truth
fully and honestly all about blue eyes,
brown boards, black hair, broad shoul-
ders, kindly faces, courtly bearings and
stately manners. and draw the pictures SO
correctly that you won't fail to recognize
the individual lust as soon as You turn the
corner in your morning walk and meet
him face to tace-and will hencetorth and
forever more 90 wandering through life
l,Dt
meet, ''thou art the man"
And 50, as it was not convenient or
possible to see and thus describe to you
all the willing candidates for the Presi-
dency, | did the next best thlng-eml-
braced an opportunity, and went to see
the man who is President. Now all laws
Of etiquette say firmly and forcibly that
evening receptions demand full dress
but when you have submitted to the tor
lures of French hair-dresser. provided
yourself with fan, gloves and flowers
covered your neck and concealed your
arms, you find that isn't tull dress at all,
but consists of being very shockingly un-
dressed. SO the world goes-saying one
thing and meaning another. No use to
deny it, for King Solomon has said that
''all men are liars" and Theodore lilton
tells his audiences this winter that women
will fib. And so 'twiXt the two-and they
ought to know whereof they ailirm-the
whole human race is deceptive, and that's
why full dress means no DRESS only a
sheen Of silk and satin trailing the floor,
rich in decorations of lace, putfs, plaits,
fringes, tlounces and flowers. just how
you get into the courtly presence is one
of those things past description. 1t is
somewhere set down that the population
OF this United States is, III round num-
bers, forty-tour millions, and you may
rely upon it as an accurate statement that
forty three million, nine hundred and
nnety-nine thousand of them attended
the Presidential levee last Tuesday even
ing. Set your imagination at work and
fancy, if you can, the condition Of per-
son, however fair, fresh and altogether
lovely on starting, alter being crushed.
jammed, pressed and ironed out flat in
such a crowd through four of five small
narrow doors into the Blue Room, where
stands the President, his family, the Cab
met, the Diplomatic Corps, and other
lesser lights OF the favored circle, await
ing this coming tide of visitors On the
lHTeSlOlu u Tue ltSl uOOI YOU cluciN OI 10
pause and take BREATH to collect yourself
and see if You are all there, and no feet,
hands, arms or head left behind; then to
adjust draperies, and so be more present
able; but behind you sways, surges and
presses, the vast impatient crowd, that
finally gives one furious plunge, and
sends you straight on like a spent arrow,
plump into the arms OF II big, burly po-
liceman. set like 1.-the flaming sword to
keep the way. "What an irruption "
murmurs a stately madame, cool, languid
and magnificent, reclining complaisantly
IN luxurious blue chair, attentively
famed by Il foreign legation, and simply
gorgeous in crimson velvet, white satin,
rare lace and sparkling diamonds. Yes,
madame, we were all ashamed to make
our debut into Presidential society in
such a plunging, headlong, unceromoni-
Gus fashion, but thanked God tor the
irruption Just the same, since it gave a
toothold and a breathing place as well.
1t is most senseless and absurd fashion,
the DraSnnt manner of hOllinU Dubljc rp-