South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1876-10-27

s'~s "Na.sS~ ~ ALI VOWu, ouO tco wafer
enough for everybody to drink, and the
Exposition is altogether the most beau
tiful place that ever saw in au my sew
enty-cight years; and / only wish my
old father and the rest of the "siCncrs,
could come out OF their graves 10 SEQ
what their poor little young republic has
been doing these hundred years.
Now, children. I'm not going to try
to tell you what saw during our five
days at the Centennial. feel as il
was kind of Kaleidoscope, and if you
were to shake your grandmother up and
look into her. you would see fragments
OF glass and china, splendid furniture
and curtains. carved wood and tapestry,
kettles and monuments, iron ratings
and Brussels lace, fine dresses and car.
riages, bells and jewelry. organs and
ships, Chinese toys and printing presses,
and pretty nearly anything that you can
think of, besides lots of things without
names-all mixed up in her old brain
in the direst confusion.
thought when stood in Machinery
Hall that, as the old propet Ezekiel
says. "The spirit OF the living creature
was in the wheels and John said | was
right, for the genius Of the American
people runs in the line Of inrenting ma
chinery; and Thought when we had in
spected tue Brewers Hall that il was n
pity the brewers should only exhibit
their implements of trade, instead of
some OF their finished manufactures, as
the other trades do. Priscilla Alden's
diamonds interested me most Of the
jewelry and l should have liked 20 stay
long time i'll the New England log
cabin, looking at John Alden's desk.
Peregrine Whites cradle, and the other
relics OF the May flower. We took our
dinner there; bat somehow, except for
the name of it, / don't think baked
beans are the INCEST dinner in the world,
and would rather sit by the ''morning.
glory" in the cushioned chair my grand.
children made me present of last
Christmas, than on any Puritan "settce"
Of them all.
but how things have changed, TO be
sure. l remember when we used to
consider fathers Revolutionary gun,
hung up in the kitchen, a wonderful in
strument o. destruction but they've
got guns in the Government Building SO
big that they tell me it takes most
hundred pounds of powder to load
them. And there's the Woman's Depart
ment: carved bedsteads. painted china,
patented desks, gossamer lace-work, all
done by them,-instead of warm, knitted
socks and calico gowns.
No, don't like to see Turks, Chinese
and other hoathens walking about in
petticoats, just as they do at home
There were none Of them in the ships
that landed at Plymouth Rock, and they
hadn't como here, as the old song says,
for freedom to worship God" Per-
haps, though, some OF them NAV be con.
verified. There's Bibles enough in the
Exposition, and that's the best feature
In it, though somehow it does seem
strange to soc them side by side with the
rum-shops. John told me how many
places there are in the grounds whore
they sell liquor but ain't going TO tell,
Tor fear the Western women should get
excited and come and tear the great
buildings down before their time, which
would be pity.
l was disappointed in the German
barons and French counts: even the Isn-
2lish nobility did not look 80 very an.
like other people, and it did seem as
though all the queer looking foreigners
might have just spoken in plain Lnglisi.,
If they only would. And as to the edu-
cational departments, its's no wonder
you children are such puny race COM
pared with your grandfathers it must
stunt you just to remember the names
OF the things which have been invented
TO help you study.
The flowers are beautiful, but don't
know that strengthening plants with.
out perfume, and with queer names, arc
bit better worth seeing than the cab
bageroScs and hoiacs which your grand
father used to bring inc Sunday nights.
But the gardens are just as pretty as
iairy-land-if there is such n place, =
only, somehow, they haven't been able
TO keep their paths straight at all.
There is just one place that should
think all the girls would keep out Of
and that's the Art Annex" don't
think anything would have hired Mary
Chiffon, or Rose Standsl, or the girls
OF the Revolution, 20 walk among those
white marble people, or look at the pic
lures with no clothes on. / suppose I'm
an old fogy, but that's just what /
think.
The most conspicuous things at the
Centennial are, after all, saltwater
fountains. They have them of every
size, every shape, and every color. in
every possible place; and don't wonder
that people go to Philadelphia and get
the matayia--tIioy say it's worse than
the measles-~if they walk round and
round nil day till their feet are sore.
and look and look till their eyes and the
backs Of their necks ache. without TAX.
ing time for square meals, eating fruit
aud popcorn and drinking coffee and
saltwater all the time.
Yes, children, I've been 90 the Cen.
tcnnial, and I've come back safe. thanks
TO the loving Providence that has not
permitted asingle accident TO haDDan TO
The pleasure-seekers. But you'H never
get yogr old graDdmother TO 20 to ano.
ther; she's ali tired out, aud before the
new century is many years old, she'll be
walking the golden streets Of that great
EyDOsitiOn. into wboae erotoa es,otI,;,c,