Smyrna times., 1876-12-13
MSSc eIIUzS e OUS .
My Cousins Plot.

"You are big goose; there now!'
And my little cousin Jessie's face glowed
with an unwonted expression of anger. l
say unwonted, because she was generally
one of the best natured little creatures in
the world.
"My dear COUSIN, said l, as blandly as
possibly, and assuming, as l spoke, highly
philosophical air-''my dear cousin, it is a
pity you were not born some forty or fifty
years earlier"
"And why so, pray?"
because then you might have had chill
dren of your own to tryannize over, and
should have been spared your more than
grandmotherly advice and espionage l
fancy that have arrived at an age when
no longer require the parental, maternal,
nor cousinal rule to keep me from going
astray, and | see no reason, or rather no
excuse. for the interposition of your wis
dom-mighty as it undoubtedly is-in my
private affairs.
II don't care whether it is any of my bust
ness or not, if you marry that girl I'll never
speak to you again"
"Won't you? I'm sorry to hear it. Miss
ldelia Vaughn is young lady of great re-
spectability. Her family is unquestionable !;
her education is complete-a great deal
better than yours, my dear-and she has
some wealth. These are worldly consider
tons, but they should be satisfactory to my
friends. For the rest she has an affectionats
disposition-'
"An affectionate humbugm
"a sympathetic heart"
"Yes, she carries her tears in her pocket
handkerchief, and applies them when re-
quired"
''She has beautiful countenanee-"
What an imagination you are gifted
within
"a fine figure"
"Oh, oh that is going little to far! She
Is veritably bone-nothing but bone
and, must say, a very ill-shaped bone al
that"
Miss Jessie, protest against any such
abuse of person whom esteem. have
told you that have offered myself to her
and that cherish greater regard for hel
than for any other young lady ever saw
These facts should insure her due degree
Prospect from my friends and relatives
"Dus degree of nonsensel / tell you
cousin, you are a ninny, and that girl-no
that spinster-is no more fit to be you
wife than she is to talk common sense"
81 have used my own judgment in pre-
posing marriage to her, and shall continu
to do So"
"You never shall marry her while l live +!
"You can't help it."
"You shall see ~
And my little cousin Jessie shook he
Aounces and ribbons like a small but wei
feathered bird, and sailed out of the roof
in a tempest of silk and crinoline.
must of course, tell my readers whi
Miss Idelia Vaughn was like, after intr
ducing her as my INTENDED bride. To d
so fairly shall give both sides of the pi
ture-my own and that of my cousin Jessi
My idea of Miss Vaughn was that she WI
atall, elegant young lady, with a severe
classical face, rich auburn ringlets, a grac
ful air and dignifed carriage, and a
expression of poetry and refinement G
hef features vas .%I4E&&Et q
Ny cousin Jessie said that she was a bea
policy, inelegant old maid, with a severe
hOmely face, thin molasses-colored ringlet
mincing and affected carriage, and an e
preston Of Laura Matilda sentimental
on her features.
The reader will see that we differed.
| became infatuated with Miss Vaugl
from reading three poems she published
acountry paper, one of which, CONNER
ing:
Ny sad soul sits in sable sheen
The orphic fire consumes my heart"
betrayed such depths of feeling and sorrc
mat felt in love with the unknown writ
ana my desire to know, sympathize wi
ana console her procured an 5interyi'
through the good nature of the count
en'or, and made such fine Byronic speech
"nsr 'hatshe returned my affection, alm'
sersey jockeys swap horses-"onsigl
,ssn. zoe Enr F ~
Ay little cousin Jessie and were COZ