, 1876-04-14
How to 90 to Sleep.


one night lately, and after vainly trying
to lose himself in slumber he happened
to remember that he once read in an. al
manac that man could put himself to
sleep by imagining that he saw flock of
sheep jumping over a fence, and by
counting them as they jumped. He de-
termined to try the experiment, and clos
ing his eyes he fancied the sheep jump
ing, and began to count. He had reached
his one hundred and fortieth sheep, and
was beginning to doze of, when Mrs.
Butterwick suddenly said:
"Joseph!"
"Ol whatm
81 believe that yellow hen Of ours
wants to SET"
80 don't bother me with such truck as
that now! Shut up and go to sleep"
Then Butterwick started his sheep
again, and commenced to count He
rot up to one hundred and twenty, and
was feeling as if he would drop off any
moment when, just as his one hundred
and twenty first sheep was about to take
that fence, one of the twins began to cry.
"Blame that childI" he shouted at Mrs.
Butterwick; "why don't you tend to it
and put it to sleep. Hush up, you little
brat, or I'll spank your
| When Mrs. Butterwick had quieted it,
Butterwick, although little nervous and
excited, concluded to try it again. Turn
ing on the imaginary mutton, he began.
Only sixty-four sheep had slid over the
fence, when Butterwick's mother-in law
knocked at the door, and asked if he was
awake. When she learned that he was,
she said that she believed he had forgot
ten to close the back shutters, and she
thought she heard burglars in the yard,
Then Butterwick arose in wrath and
wentdown to see aboutit. He ascertained
that the shutters were closed as usual,
and as he returned to bed, he resolved
that either that woman would leave
the house for good in the morning,
or else he would. However, he thought
he might as well give the almanac plan
another trial, and setting the sheep in
motion he began to count. This time he
reached two hundred and forty, and
would probably have got to sleep before
the three hundredth sheep jumped, had
not Mix's new dog in the next yard sud-
denly become homesick, and begun to
express his feelings in series Of pro-
longed and exasperating howls. Butter
wick was mad. Dropping the sheep he
leaped from bed and began to lombard
Mix's new dog with boots, soap cups,
and every loose object he could lay his
hands on. He hit the animal at last
with plaster bust of Daniel Webster,
and induced the dog to retreat to the
stable to think about home and silence
1t seemed almost ridiculous to resume
those sheep again, but he determined to
give the almanac man one more chance
so as they began to jump the fence he
began to count, and after seeing the
eighty-second sheep safely over, he wal
gliding gently into the land of dreami
when Mrs. Butterwick rolled out of bed
and fell on the floor with such violence
that she walked both the twins and started
them crying, while Butterwick's mother
in-law came down stairs, four steps at {
time, to ask them if they felt that earth
quake.
The situation was too awful for words
Butterwick regarded it for minute with
speechless indignation, and then seizine
a pillow he went over to the sofa in the
back sitting-room and lay down on the
lounge. He fell asleep in ten minutes
without the assistance of the almanac
but he dreamed all night that he was be.
ing butted around the equator by q
Cotswold ram, and he awoke In the morn.
in with terrific headache and convic.
ton that sheep are good enough fol
wool and chona huk NOT worth q oanf ~ q
narcotic. MAX ADELER.