Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1876-09-02

BY GALE PRTINGTnN.

BY GALE PRTINGTON.
While in New York, / bought a
dog which I.become very fond Of.
One day / lost him and called at
the police station for information
concerning him. / was directed
to the mayors Office. / found the
present occupant of the city Hall
in his private Office smoking a five
cent cigar.
After having made vain inqui-
ries concerning my canine, the
mayor asked me if Virginians are
fond of holding Offices. OF course
/ told the truth and said, "no.p
Eyeing me intently for a few
minutes he said: "Mr Darlington,
wouldn't you be willing to accept
the position of chief clerk in the
Sheriffs Office? The salary, it's
true, is only 81 800 year, but you
can live on that I believe" I hes
itated. Who wouldn't hesitate,
after having committed himself
like that.
"Mr. Mayor cried /, trying to
appear uncOncerned. / felt the
gratitude rising in my throat like
the mercury in the thermometer.
"Mr. Mayor, 1 don't think I can
accept the situation, but''-
mo butts at ALL" said his mayor
ship. "You may use my buggy
whenever you want to take a
drive"
The gratitude rose higher, and
higher in my throat. But Thought
that I'd just dose him a little be-
fore accepting the twenty-five hun
dred a year, from his honor the
mayor, "Mr. Darlington, the work
isn't anything at all, my dear sir,
actually nothing at ALL"
"Ow From me.
"Besides, Mr. Darlington" This
time from the mayor. "YOu may
step in and smoke a few of the
county clerks pure Havana smug-
gled CIGARS
I now felt the gratitude getting
into my head. / was determined
to appear as a New Jersey ice
house.
Furthermore" he resumed, 1
shall make an exception in your
case and here extend you an invi-
tation to visit my house whenever
you fell disposed. On Sundays af-
ter the fatigues of a day of rest.
always come and take tea with
me-"
Before / could restrain myself 1
had shouted: "Mr. Wichem, Mr..
Mayor, you're too good"
mot at all, not at all, Mr.. Par
tington. / shall do more. You
know l like you. You're a sedate
young man. You have no non
sense about you. say l like you.
What l was going to say is this: 1
am guardian for a young lady who
will attain her majority in a few
days. The young lady lets me guide
her in everything. It's true she's
pOor-owning only a couple hun
dred thousands; but you are both
young, you know. She's stopping
at my house. The rest / let you
understand as you may"
100000, Mr.. Mayor, how can
l find words adequate to express
the heartfelt gratitude which / at
this moment experience? 1 most
cordially accept the Office and shall
call in the morning to be intro
duced into the official minutes
which r necessarily incumbent
on a novice.'
l had been studying that answer
for an half hour. / used all the big
words that / had ever seen the
English novelists use, from Field
ing to Chsrles Reade. / was Just
as confident of getting the Office as
you are that l am now telling the
truth.
But wasn't / disappointed? The
mayor drew himself up like Booth
in Hamlet, and said: II thought
Virginians didn't like offices %
l didn't say anything, but slid
out. l think that was one Of the
worst jokes ever perpetrated by a
mayor.
1 was right, Virginians don't
like offices. They like only the sal