The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1876-01-01

fshes-he thought-but that was hardly CON-
sidered qualification enough. Finally, it was
decided that the Chairman should project a paper
pellet into the air, and the first ex-whaling cap
tain it happened to hit should be the custodian.
For, 1t was ~shrewdly argued, if the one on whom
the choice falls does not happen to know much
about fishes in general, he will be sure to know
all about whales, and as they are the biggest, it
will be but little trouble for him to manage the
small fry. The Chairman launched the wad, and
hit an old skipper-now a ship chandler-who
accepted the situation good-Haturedly, and prom
ised to present the Museum with a specimen of a
fish of the genus GadtS, that be had lately re-
ceiyed. lie went on TO say that the specimen
had been sailed and dried, and would : keep
it was without a head, but he s'posed that didn't
make any difference. Cries of Mo- No (!
well put a head on him. &c. interrupted him,
and be sat down.
\ STRANGER here arose and began to explain
that a whale was not a fish, - but was quickly
eoughed down and put out.
Three sCurators of Crustacea" were then ap-
pointed to look after crabs, crawfsh and shrimps,
and instructions were gwen them to boil all
specimens well, and then restore the natural color
by painting them.
Zoology was next discussed, and as it was
stated that the island could not boast of an in
digenous fauna, il was not thought necessary to
appoint a Curator of Zoology. The Secretary of
the II. |. 5. was, however, empowered to enter
into negotiations with the proper parties for the
purpose Of receiving a stuffed bullock, horse and
hoki. Several members agreed TO furnish the
Museum with their neighbours dogs and cats,
which offers were accepted, with the proviso,
that all shot holes should be nicely sewn up, and
the animals stuffed with straw, and provided
with mother o. pearl eyes.
The distinguished author of ga Monograph on
Hawaiian Birds, was then elected as Curator of
the Ornithological Department, and he announced
his Intention of dividing his work into seven
parts, viz. birds of prey, scratchers, climbers,
runners, leaders, swimmers and singing birds.
Part of these he could look after himself, while
others he proposed to give into the care of lady
assistants cloud cheering). His department.
he went on to say-demanded that n peculiar
feeling of sympathy should exist between the
objects and their collectors. who, in this con-
n~ection,' he would ask, was better fitted to
display the singing birds to best advantage than
the sweet-voiced Miss -? or who would more
tenderly and sympathizingly arrange the brilliant
plumage of some of our birds than our acknowl-
edged belle, Mrs. -? while the graceful atti-
tudes of other specimens would be best shewn, if
their management was entrusted to our fair
friend, Miss -
AS soon as the applause that followed the an
nouncement of these names had subsidized, an
impudent wretch arose and said, That if SYM
pathy was a qualification, he would suggest that
the birds of prey be cared for by some of Homo
lulu's female gossips, and the scratchers to a few
well-known viragos.'' The abandoned creature
was silenced, and geology was taken up.
Then our acknowledged authority on rocks
arose, and spoke learnedly and feelingly on the
structure of the islands. He mentioned lava,
and began to tell how to cook it, but was checked
by the remark that SO time was up" He took
his seat and was appointed Curator of Geology,
Mineralogy, CrystyllOgraphy and Geodism gen.
orally. He was also invested with the title OF
ssCosmostic Curator in Chief"
Meteorology was assigned to a competent par
ty, the state of whose corns and rheumatism al
ways indicated the probabilities for the next
twenty-four hours, with all the accuracy of
Jayne's Almanac. At this stage of the proceed
AuSc ~ wac uicSOFClCu Ii Il SNSIyuOuJ VIM nOuAu
consent to act as Curators had been assigned to
various departments, and the question as to who
should look after the other ologies, sweep out the
room, dust things, and make themselves useful
generally, was postponed indefinitely.
The following is a partial list of objects that l
dreamed were presented to the Museum
Specimen of Musa sapientum.
Specimen of Pisca Gadus.
a Constitution, once the property of the Ha-
waiian Nation.
Stone Idol, bought by the donor from the ka-
naka who (makes andy sells such things cheap.
Model of a Road repaired by a country Road
Supervisor.
Back bone of a Shark that jumped 1000 feet
over a reef, with affidavit of Editor Gaeete.)
Three Words, that our Deputy Collector could
not make a pun on.
Photograph of - as he appeared when
telling the truth. (Unique.)
Part of the Crack lately discovered in the big
bell of the Fire Department.
One hundred and ninety Navy Buttons, unre-
deemed Pledges collected by Miss -
IGNoRANUs.