The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-09-22
TOMATOES AND OYSTERS.
Men Kissing Men-shaiI we Introduce Itns
"a Custom?

Men Kissing Men-shaiI we Introduce IL as
"A Custom?
Years ago, and not so many either,
says q contemporary, when the tomato
was called the "love apple, and Guilt
vate d as an object of curiosity, the idea
of eating it was not entertained. Its
flavor to the natural taste was disagree
able in the extreme. Yet now 1T is uni
versally eaten, aud is considered not
only the most delightful but one OF the
most wholesome vegetables.
So with the oyster. Nothing can be
more disgusting to the eye, nothing
more revolving to the stomach-ti.at is
the uneducated eye and stomach. IL
was observed, during the late war, that
the men who came down from the noun
tains To the coast could not for long
time be persuaded to touch oysters, or
to eat out of a vessel in which they had
been cooked. They even reg ardedwith
distrust the people who did eat them,
looking'upon them as unnatural beings
with depraved appetites. Andyet neither
the earth nor the air, nor the waters that
cover the earth, contain aught that in
all respects equals the oyster.
The generalization often drawn from
the tomato and oyster is, that acquired
tastes are by odds the strongest, and in
many cases the most beneficial to man.
kind. But the latent moral, observable
only by the philosophical eye, has never
yet been unfolded to blind and unin-
quiring word. We announce it now.
1t is this:
hn or
and most beneficial, may it not be-nay,
is it not certain-that mankind is losing
great deal by not cultivating these
tastes, aud by not searching about to
find objects on which to exercise them
The French are very happy and indus
trious in pursuits of this character, and
the result is that they can eat and enjoy
anything on earth except buzzards.
But what do the Americans say to the
kissing of men as new, cheap and per-
manent source of deep enjoyment / We
all fancy that we know what it is to kiss
woman-a young and pretty woman.
1t is said by those who have tried it to
be rather a good thing. But the kissing
of grown man by grown man is
something at which unenlightened cpl
gastrium heaves fearfully-in this coun-
try. The French kiss, the Germans kiss,
and-do but read this:
Oscillation IS practiced somewhat
promiscuously in Russia. Somebody
writes: The Russian ceremony of sa-
luting every one upon Easter with the
sentence "Christ has risen" and kiss,
WAS carried ont with much pomp bS the
hi al "a
midnight, the hour being announced 10y
cannon. the Gar, hi, family and all the
court dienitaries, together with the chief
officers of the army and navy, went in q
procession into the church adjoining the
winter palace. Here, at q certain stage
of the ceremonies, the Gar gave three
kisses each to the state dignitaries, the
General, aides de camp, and the com
mssiooed officers of the guard. Mass
was then celebrated and the company
dispersed.
So great man as the Emperor of al
the Russias we may be very sure would
not indulge in the above ceremony if il
were SO very loathsome as we Americans
fancy. Ours il II miserable delusion.
Away with it. We haven doubt bu:
that the kissing OF men is AZ far superior
TO the kissing of women as beef is &c
veal. Nothing can be argued from the
kissing of old women, who are Kind OF
beardless man, because nobody kisses
them often enough. If we persisted, as
one does with tomatoes ami oysters, ole
women's kisses would in time become
delicious, but still not quite equal tc
the kisses of men. The mustache, we
are assured, operates like black walnut
catchup on fish.
Objections to tobacco, whisky, Swiss
cheese, and perhaps onions, as ipevita
ble accomplishments of the male kiss,
Will be urged by the opponents Of oul
views. The objections have no particle
of weight. Frail, delicate, refined
women manage to worry through long
happy lives in spite of those trifes, ant
we may do the same. Let us hasten the
era of high favored masculine kisses
and leave the tame, insipid lips of womer
to schOolboys and preachers. We have
lost ages of bliss by not doing it in times
past, and We cannot begin too soon.