The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1876-10-25
How Late May a Lover stays

Miss Abbie J. Terry, an American
young lady of literary proclivities, in q
recent publication, says:
cit is an imposition on any well bred
girl to keep her up later than haIf-past
ten o'clock, when you have the opportu.
nifty of seeing her often. If you always
leave her with the wish in her heart
that you had staid longer, you gain SO
much. Never run the risk of wearying
her with your presence. Woo woman
bravely. If there is anything humili-
ating to woman, it is to have a lover,
whom she wishes to honor, weak and
vapid, ever yielding and half afraid Of
her. She longs to tell him to got Like q
man."
Miss Terry, it will thus be seen, holds
the same profound and correct views OF
the female heart which were entertained
by Mr.. Weller, who commended the
"bob-tailed style of love letter." be-
cause it made the recipient wish there
was more of it. For our part We take
exceptions at once to Miss Terry's rul-
ing. Why should it be an imposition to
keep well bred girl up later than 1890
P. N. conversing with her betrothed or
probable betrothed on the same sofa in
q parlor with the gas turned down for
economy, as becomes these times OF re-
trenchment and reform, and not an i'm
position to take her to ball, where un-
der the glaring light she will dance till
four A. NJ. with score of people, to not
one-haH Of whom she can reasonably e1-
pect to become engaged9 True, there
should be moderation in lovers visits.
Such visits should not be prolonged, as
q rule, till what the society reporters call
that "late, or rather early hour, )" when,
as Tennyson beautifully observes:
"The cats sneak home and Ie eht is come,
And the milkmen jump upon the ground"
But except in the backwoods, under the
dispensation of pine knots, it is hard to
see why either economy or prudence
should refuse the limit of later hour
than that designated by Miss Terry, say
midnight or quarter after on ordinary
occasions, and eleven or half-past on
Saturday nights. Miss Terry's caution
to young men against wearying the OBJ
ject of their attentions is, however, in
controvertibly iudicious. There is moth
ing 80 beneficial or fattering to true
woman as little wholesome neglect.
Another acute observer of women and
things, Mr.. Joshua Billings, in one of
his essays, enlarges on this point and
lays down the rule that it is "wellsome-
times to draw in your wind and look as
though it hurt you, for she will think
you are ailing and will pity you" and
pity, it is an established psychological
fact, easily melts the heart to love.
Othello was skillful practitioner in
this kind, if Shakespeare may be be-
ieved. Miss Terry, who insists on per-
feet honesty between lovers, perhaps
would not sanction such q ruse, and
perhaps she is right, though it has been
well said that in love, war and politics
deception is often the better part of
valor. Her last rule, "Woo woman
bravely," is admirable, though in COM
menting upon it she seems to betray
some personal feeling, as if she, so to
speak, knew how it was herself. But
why should she overlook the fact that
this is leap year, and centennial leap
year at that, when by all the canons it
is agreed that, without doing violence
to her womanhood, any true woman may
tell her lover, though a very sheep, to
"act like a man. = World.