Bismarck weekly tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, D.T. [N.D.]) 1875-1878, 1876-08-23
varied by tri.dally stops for meals with
the accompanying swindle of an over
charge. Meals-baastlY. But this is

V0AI0O W slA'Uony CtVpo AOA aAOoA0 Will
the accompanying swindle Of an over
charge. Meals-beastly. But this is
the centennial year and we never grum-
ble-only growl. The only relief we
had was in an occasional conversation
with some unfortunate wretch who was
not going to the centennial and felt cor
respondingly downcast.
ON our arrival here we found the
whole city agog with it's own impor.
lance, somewhat subdued, however, I
learn, from the excessive heat that has
prevailed here during the last three
weeks. Only 105 in the shade! Oh,
ye Bismarckers, think of that! But
thanks be to Allah!-no mosquitoes.
imagine the luxury Of not having to
wear mask. stand over smudge, and
use handkerchief with both hands.
This is paradaisical enjoyment with a
vengeance. .rsa '@ @Q1 ~ :" .~.s
Ny first visit yesterday, after the
customary ':prodigal son" business had
been tided over, was visitto the show.
My debut was a sensational affair. /
started to enter the wrong gate. Was
repelled by the guard, struggle ensued,
and policeman came to the rescue. A
terrible scufle took place on the plat
form that registers each visitor as they
enter, and I suppose we three must have
registered about eightY-seven people
inside of three minutes. When the
g consciousness of this fact
dawned upon the benlghted guard, and
the appalling idea that he would be
short about eighty six half dollars at
sunset, his intellect gave way under the
strain and he became raving maniac.
He was incarcerated in the asylum i'm
mediately, and his poor wife was so
overcome by the dreadful news that she
eloped with car conductor this morn
ing. This makes me feel sad, but an
citizen is not to be trampled
on, as it were. But I obtained admit
tance finally, and by sort of animal
instinct found restaurant the first
time. Lanber's German Restaurant l
can recommend-good food, we'll served
and prices remarkably reasonable; but
everything is decidedly cheap here now,
at least it seems so to anyone coming
direct from the West, where everything
is so decidedly dear.
1t reminds me Of the time I was in
Sweden (of course I never was in Swe-
den, Colonel, but if you keep dark no
one will ever know the difference, and it
sounds so we'll, you know, } with very
dear friend of mine-poor fellow, he
died in 1907 was quite young then.
We had both very large fortune-to
get-and were enjoying ourselves i'm
mensely. Everything was so cheap in
Stockholm that we nearly bankrupted
ourselves in buying everything we could
not by any possibility ever need. We
especially admired an article of finely
vanished beer (silk finish) which was
sold at the rate of about gallon for a
cent. We carried home about seven
gallons of this article as sample, but
as we had forgotten to bring jug or
other receptacle with us, we carried it
right along with US. We carried it up
against pedestrians, and lamp posts and
and other obstacles, and
finally brought up in the finest style of
art in the lookup. After a peaceful
of many hours duration we
were aroused by brutal policeman who
escorted US before the magistrate, who,
inside Of five minutes by the Swedish
clock, fined US twenty dollars for dis
turbing the peace. .... ..
NV friend was Mortified.
"Good Ged!" he cried Indignantly,
sand they call this a cheap country
That is the regular New York tariff !"
And the next day we left Sweden.
On second thoughts I didn't exactly
see what this has got to do with the CEN
tennial, but my duty to society at large
compels me to write about something,
and to tell the truth, I never got any
further than the restaurant the first
lay. This is very humiliating con-
fession to make but it is too early to
oreyaricate, and besides the awful fact
1as dawned upon me that I cannot tell
all know about the great moral mena-
,ere IN one letter.
l am very much afraid that l shall
1ot trouble you to a very great extent
With statistical tables of facts or figures,
except figures ofspeech. I find a more |
interesting study in the visitors to the
than in the centennial itself.
think it is Pope who says that "tne
proper study Of mankind is man," and
Pope knew. And so in my next we Will
study man, and of course take casual
dance at women, and gracious heavens,
low we will dissect them! SIDNEY.
LONESOME CHARLEY.'