The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1876-10-12
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS. -,
THE chief " trubbul''- sitting Bull.
u Advertising is the bull's:eye Of trade.
lit takes deal of thunder to sour the
milk of human kindness. %sS
The farmers are now pulling down
their vests-harvests, you know.
Exeter, N. H., proposes introducing
the chain.gang, as there Is no more room
in her jail.
Uncle Sans mistake-Taking Sitting
Bull by the Little horn.-L0uispiWe Cour-
ser.Journal
People leave their homes In sickly
seasons that THEY may be reported absent
when death calls.
A lake in Lower California that in
1878 was 100 square miles in area is now q
small pond, and fast dwindling.
The Danbury Neaes has found a coal
dealer so careful about weighing a load
that he stands on the scales himself
The Chesapeake (Md) CAesopske is d
new paper: Here is the editors saluta-
tory: "What have to say to this COM
munity will be said gradually"
"A North Hill man has applied for a
divorce on the grounds of excessive cruel
V, because his wife feeds him on oatmeal
mush six times Week.-Burlingt0n
Hack Eye.
The new railroad in China proves a
marvel to the natives. 1t is said to be a
refreshing spectacle to see he COW catcher
pick up celestial walking on the track
and fill the air with meat and pig-tail.
! <>M - l.
been accused of bargaining to spread
to receive fifty dollars, if sent to certain
hospital. A queer mode Of making
money
American peaches are sold in London
markets, and command what might be
called fancy prices. Anything "Ameri.
cam sells in London, from paper of
tacks to a pound of beef. Prejudice
has been etlectually rubbed down Of late
years.
Says the Norwich Bulletin: There
has been fall recently in Appropriateness,
and very fair reliable hippopotamus can
now be bought for 5000. There are in.
dlcatlons OF rise, however, and people
OF small means should lay in their supply
at once.
"A young woman in whose family
group the old song. I'VE Miss Thee at
Homc,H was popular, eloped two weeks
ago and has just written to her parents
that she is married. They now sing,
1--WE Mrs. Thee at Home.-Loacelk (Nuss. }
| Courier.
Each heart is world. You find all
within yourself that you find without.
The world that surrounds you is the magic
glass OF the world within you. To know
yourself, you have only to set down Il true
statement OF tn Ose that ever loved or hated
you.-LaU0ter.
| "A prison for women at South Farm.
lngton, Mass, will be completed next year.
All the officers and employees, except the
! engineer and fireman, are women. We
may be mistaken. but 1t seems to us nc
woman will go to that prison if she can
help it.-Rochester Chronicle.
Little Johnny has peculiar views as to
original sin One day he was about to be
! punished for some misdemcanor, when he
pleaded: 1t wasn't me, mamma dear-it
was the bad man" "Weli, Johnny, I'm
going to whip the bad man out of YOU"
"Ah, yes, but that'll hurt me precious
lot more than it will the bad man.
-" How much will your new school,
books cost, Johnny?' says father. John
ny calculate for himself, soto coce: & Lem
me see: sixty-two cents for the singing
book, seventy five cents for new 'rith-
metic, 1926 for new biography, twenty
five cents for hockey, half dollar for
new bat, and a quarter for candy"
then out loud says, " Bout four dollars,
pal!
Tommy is fond of sugar, and asks his
mother for some to eat with his strawber-
ries. She refuses. He appears resigned,
but adds gravely: ;" You know, mann
ma, what happened round the corner?
would not give him any sugar on his
strawberries, and -" "And-?" "And
next day he fell into WE'LL"
-" You would make most beautiful
actress in the drama of lifc," whispered a
poetical Chicago youth to his inamorata,
| the other evening" indeed, tits so-Ypu
would be very STAR And YOU muir
INJURED the fair one, as she leaned her friz-
Like to support mc?'' So he arranged it
right there. How could he help it? Cards,
of coursc.-CAiccgo Epeuang Journal.
An old gentleman went to shoot part.
ridges, accompanied by his son. The
gun was charged halfway up the muzzle,
and when at last the old gentleman start
ed some birds he took rest and blazed
away, expecting to see some fall, of
course; but not so did it happen, for the
gun recoiled with so much force as to
and while rubbing the sparks out of
his eyes inquired of his son: " Dick did
point the right end of the gun to the
birds?"
"A dreamy philosophe or has discovered
that mosquitoes are animated by the souls
| of wicked men who have gone to their last
account. For pituitary purposes they are
doomed to spare a certain time every year
in their cold, earthly haunts, and they
take advantage Of their new form to tor
ment the good people, who were their
especial aversion during their sinful lives
mosquito life, they turn into grasshoppers
and Ego West. IN. Y. Mail.
AT fire in provincial town the goods
in a burning shop had to be cast out into
the street, and, as a matter of course, the
night being dark, the articles were disap-
pearing rapidly. A policeman, observing
cheese, very cleverly made his way
through the crowd and stationed himself
| behind, so as to prevent any escape. The
man rose, with the cheese in his hands,
and was preparing to dccamp, but on be-
holding the policeman in such close vicin-
ity he rapidly changed his mind, and
| quietly placed the cheese in the police
mans arms, renaking, as he did So:
"There, you had better take care of that,
CT some one will be walking off with it. )"
INCIDENTS AND ACCIDENTS.