Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1876-08-11
The FIRST Smoke.

THE small boy sees his father and the
other men and the big boys smoke, and he
concludes that there must be something
very fine about it, since so many older
and presumably wiser, people indulge in
the habit.
He resolves he will smoke, too, the very
first chance. He is curious about it-he
wonders what the sensation will he like
His anticipations are lively and rose.
colored. Of course he wants to be man,
and the sooner he learns to smoke the
sooner he will have attained to mans es-
tate. For, borrowed from what premises,
and summed up by what rule of logic we
know not, almost every boy has an idea
that smoking is something no one can be
man without practicing.
| Our ambitious boy saves up his spare
\ coppers and buys ten-cent cigar. He is
private with it; he doesn't tell the other
boys about it. He wants to learn the
smoking trade, and then take their breath
away by bursting out upon them some day
| full-fledged; and able to puff out as big a
cloud of smoke as father, or Uncle jim,
or any of 'them fellers."
He retires with his cigar to some back
alley, lights it and commences operations.
| BY the time he has drawn three whiffs he
| fully expects the delightful sensation to
begin. But they do not exactly seem to
put in an appearance. He feels a little
disgusted and wonders if he is not doing
it right. He has got his heels elevated on
the fence-quite as high as his father ele-
Yates his on similar occasions-and he has
thrown back his head, and tipped his hat
in the proper angle, and he is putting with
vigor, but he does not seem to feel any
happier.
His head feels light sun seems
dancing a crazy, unequal kind of jig
around the horizon, and the fence posts
and apple-trees are trying hard to keep up
| with it.
But our boy is game" and he perse-
veres, and determines 10 conquer or die!
Puff! puff! puff and still that horid un-
steadiness of everything continues. The
world in general has taken on a blush
and there Is b bnzhihg ihg il in niE Ifs ds lRie
rushing of many waters.
Never mind the buzzing," says our
plucky boy--he is going to smoke! That's
what he's going 10 do!
He begins to feel as if his dinner was
disagreeing with him, and he wonders
vaguely if it is the pickles, or the cheese,
or that last piece of mince pie that his
mother said he had better not eat
liz IllllhS uC IL nOJ say any IuluS dDOuJ
it in the house, for fear Aunt Betsy who
presides over the health department of the
household, will be mixing up salts, or
tincture of rhubarb, and he would as lief
be killed as take either!
His face has taken the hue of half ripe
lemon-his eyes are rolled up in his head
it is with much ado that he manages to
sustain his equilibrium, but he sticks to
that cigar! He is bound to smoke!
At last, circumstances are too powerful
for him, and he can hold out no longer
His head sinks on his bosom-his eyes
close-the ten-cent cigar rolls unheeded
away, and our boy collapses, and rests his
tired body on the lap of earth, and rem
ders up his dinner with patience and resig-
nation.
After that he feels better, and just as he
is thinking about resuming operations his
father comes along, and takes in the stu
alton. Generally speaking, our boy gets
trouncing," and peremptory orders
not to try that on again, sir! but he does
not obey; his mind is made up to be a
smoker and smoker he will be!
Through much tribulation, no doubt, he
attains the desired end, and then spends
all his after life in smoking away his
health, and substance, and regretting that
he learned to smoke
And his wife scOlds about it every day,
"enough TO fill a newspaper" and the
house smells like bar room, and the cur
tains emit the odor of bacon But what
of that? Doesn't everybody smoke? Ger
tainly sir, certainly Kate Thorn, in N.
Y WeeLLu