The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1876-11-23
ss.Ia1ossT 81

Oa' AO PAiuCO uiMScii upOu UCIHS o
plain, matter-of-fact old man, about
whom there was no foolishnes sor sem
timent. On more than one occasion
he had mortified his wife and daugh-
ters by hustl;ng them out of religious
meetings when they had begun to
show signs of emotion. He said he
didn't believe in "mirakerlous CONVEX
sations," and that people who cried
and yelped over getting religion
"wasn't gettin' it by a burned sight
He believed that the genuine article
was soothing and calming, and not ex-
citing in its influence.
Once the Campbellites held pro-
tracted meeting in the neighborhood,
and as it was carried on without any
sudden outbursts of feeling. Simon
took kindly to it, and attended regu-
larly. One Sunday morning he told
his wife to lay him out two suits of
clothes.
"Why, Simon" exclaimed she in her
shrill tones, "whatever do you want
with two suits of clothes!'
"That's my businessmen yours, "he
replied gruffiy. "You lay out my
black suit for me to put on, and wrap
the brown one up in, q bundle, and
don't ask any fool questions"
His wife wonderingly but silently
and Simon donned one suit,
and with the other under his arm,
his horse and rode away, fol-
lowed by the anxious eyes of the lit
tie and big Stringers, who marveled
greatly. and said one to another !:
"Whst's dad agoin' to do with his
t'Other clothes? 2"
Simon didn't return till supper time.
He took his place at the table, which
was the usual sig nal for the onslaugh
upon the victuals, but on this occasion
his voice arrested every arm in its de-
scent, and for the second time that
day astonished the Stringers. Glanc-
ing around The astoni.hed circle he
thus delivered himself:
az want it unders TODD that the head
of this household has this day been
bapiised. He is a follower OF the
meek and lOwly Jesus, and the first
critter at this table that dips into any
hing afOre blessin' is askedIl get
baldheaded. Drap yer eyes
ye heathen."
The blessing was asked, and that
neal was eaten in silence.
After the chores were done, the
Stringers were stringing of to bed,
when the stern voice of the old man
gain arrested them, and filed their
minds with grave forbodings as to
what was coming next. He addressed
hem as follows: Il
"Come into this room, every devil
Of you, and flop down on your knees.
II is my duty as devout Christian 10
nave family worship, and I'll have
t, too, and have a respectful attention,
Dr. I'll bust some domestic ties assun-
Ter. This mansion must resound with
praises to the Most High, or it will re-.
sound with some one gettin' hell of
= thrashin'-I mean bein' severely
,hastised. The first one who snick-
srs or makes any unseemly noise, I'll
git up and throw a cheer through him
Dr. her as the case may be. Let us
pray"
The prayer was prayed, and never
was there a more attentive audience.
This sort of thing continued about
,wo weeks, and the Stringer family
vas kept in a state of extreme misery.
The younger members had been sew.
'ral times severely whipped for con-
luct unbecoming the children of
rue believer, and the older ones had
eceived such harsh reprimands for
ailing to fall into the new order of
hings and comport themselves with
lue dignity.
Then one morning Simon came in,
Vith a bad limp, and battered milk |
'ail, and the knees of his pants torn.
Dropping into chair at the table, he
lunged his fork savageIy into the
earest dish. The children looked up
rom the backs of their plates ques-
ioningly, and their mother squeaked,
Why, Simon!"
"Shut up and eat!' he growled, and
hen I'm few moments added:
''This blessin' and prayer business is
for while. don't furgit
~ oblergashuns an duties as Chris
an, and Ill resoom 'em arter I've
that dol-dinged red heifer
he 'tarnal critter presooms too much
d my Christian forbearance. Durn q
ypOcrit! l won't pray when my soul
Mt into it. It's too great a strain,
ur the time bein' hev descended
ON grace. Pass the tomattusses."
A sigh OF relief went round the cir
c. and if the red heifer had known
)w she hal risen in the esteem of a
ajority of the Stringers, her fractions
'ul would have leaped for joy.
That was several years ago, and
wv the red heifer is COW, and the
Orst one in the neighborhOod. The
ringers say, as they punch and
ague her, "S'iong's we keep OldRed 2
lid, dad won't git any more o. that 6
yful reIigun. Brunswick News.
SCRATCHES IN THE HORSE.
To ,..a caro fol hos m 10 bncoo rIa | j