The tribune. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1874-1876, 1876-09-20
A Terrible Bore.

Mr.. Snifin sends us the following:
When I bought my present place the
former owner offered, as one Of the in
ducements to purchase, the fact that
there was superb sugar maple tree in
the garden. It was noble tree, and I
made up my mind that would tap It
some day and manufacture some sugar.
However. never did 80 until this year.
But few weeks ago concluded to draw
the sap and to have what Mr.. Bangs
calls "a sugar bilin'." My wife's uncle
was staying with us, and after inviting
some friends to come and eat the sugar
he and I got to work. We took huge
washkettle down into the yard and piled
some wood beneath it, and then we
brought out q couple of buckets to catch
the sap and the aueer with which to bore
hole in the tree.
My wife's uncle said that the bucket
ought to be set about three feet from
the tree, as the sap would squirt right
out with good deal Of force, and it
would be pity to waste any Of it.
Then he lighted the fire while bored
the hole about four inches deep. When
I took the anger out the sap did not fol.
low, but my wife's uncle said what il
wanted was little time, and so, while
we waited, he put fresh armful of wood
on the fire. We waited half an hour,
and as the sap didn't come I concluded
that the hole was not deep enough, SO I
begun boring again; but I bored too far,
for the auger went clear through the
tree and penetrated tho back Of my
wife's uncle, who was leaning up against
the trunk trying to light his pipe. He
jumped nearly forty feet, and had to
mend him up with courtplaster.
Then he said he thought the reason
the sap didn't come was that there ought
to be kind Of spigot in the hole so as
to let it run off easily. We got tho
wooden spigot from the vinegar barrel
in the cellar and inserted it. Then, as
the sap did not come, my wife's uncle
said he thought the spigot must be
iammed in 30 tight that it choked the
flow; and while tried to push it out he
fed the fire with some kindling wood.
AS the spigot could not be budged with
hammer / concluded to bore it out
with the anger, and meanwhile my wife's
uncle stirred the fire. Then the suger
broke off short in the hole, and I had to
60 half a mile to the hardware store to
get another one.
Then I bored fresh hole, and al
though the sap would not come. the
company did, and they examined with
much interest that kettle, which was now
red-hot, and which my wife's uncle was
trying to lift of the fire with the hay
fork. AS the sap still refused to come +
went over for Bangs TO tell me how to
make that exasperating tree disgorge.
When he arrived he looked at the hole.
then at the spigot, then at the kettle,
then at the tree. Then turning to me
he said:
"Sniffin, you have had good dealo'
trouble in your life, an it's done you
good. It's made man Of you. This
world is full OF sorrow, but we must
bear it without grumblin'. You know
that, of course. Consequently, now that
I've some bad news to break to you,
feels if the shock won't knock you end
ways, butu be received with patient
resignation. say hope you won't
break down an give. way to your feelin's
when I tell you that there tree il NO
sugar maple at all. Grashus, why that's
black hickory. It is, indeed. And You
might as well bore for maple sugar In
the side of telegraph pole"
Then the company went home, and
my wife's uncle said he had an engage.
ment with man in Hatboro' which he
must keep right off. ] took the kettle
up to the house, but as it was burned
out I sold it next day for fifteen cents
for old iron, and bought new one for
$12. I think now maybe it's better to
buy your maple sugar.