The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1876-09-14
The smell of bay-rum and bergamot is

The smell of bay-rum and bergamot is
his handkerchief musk is perceptible.
His boots shine like mirrors There is a
faint odor of cardamom seeds in his breath
when he yawns.
He smoothes his budding mustache with
affectionate little pats, and feels his invisi-
BILE side whiskers continually, to make
sure they are still there, a fact which is
not established to outside observers by the
sense of sight.
He tries on all his stock of neck-ties
without finding what is just the thing; and
he has spasms of brushing his coat, that
commence with violence, and last till one
grows nervous for fear the broadcloth will
never be able to stand it.
He declines SOUP that day at dinner.
He says it is because he doesn't feel nun
cry, but we know it is because there are
onions in it, and onions, as every one
knows, do not sweeten ones breath to any
great extent.
If spoken to on a siidden, lie starts and
bushes, and looks as guilty as if he had
been caught stealing something, and di-
rectly one does not speak to him, he goes
back to the delightful occupation of star
ing at nothing, and waiting for the hour
hand to creep around to seven.
AT seven, he sets forth, clean and tidy
from top to toe, looking precisely as if he
had just stepped out of a band box.
In sympathy and in imagination we fol.
low him.
Affairs are not fully understood between
him and Mary Jane; lie is stlil in astatC
of anxious, though somewhat blissful un
certainty. He does not feel quite sure
whether she means business, or is only
flirting with him.
Consequently he is somewhat timid.
He steps through the gate into the yard
of Mary James paternal domicil with in.
ward trepidation. He is not entirely Ger.
tain that his visits are welcome. He won.
ders if the old folks will be at home
or if they will have had the grace to
go to evening meeting and leave the coast
clear.
He devoutly hopes that those two little
brothers are in bed, for they are the tor
ment Of his life since lie has been trying
to court Mary Jane. And if "that other
fellow is there, he mentally vows that
I'll know what such CARVINGS on mean
yes, that he will.
by the time he reaches the door steps
he is in a cold sweat, and almost wishes
he hadn't come. He rings the bell with
nervous jerk, and then feels an insane
desire to rush off down the street without
waiting for any one to answer the sum-
mons. But he hears footsteps within, and
knows that it is too late to make good his
escape. So he remains and puts a bold
face on it, and feels those side wlskers
and smiles hopefully, and says to himself
that he does hope Mary Jane will come to
the door herself, and not send that grin.
ming servant girl, who invariably giggles
in his face, and then Grams her apron into
her mouth to stop further developments
when he inquiries, els Miss Mary al
homey'
After he gets inside the house he is still
in a state of perplexity. Will his wei
come be warm enough to admit of hi:
removing his overcoat and leaving it il
the hall? or will the state of the atmos
phere be such that he will feel chilly
round his heart with his overcoat on?
When he is seated in the parlor, the
problem he is called upon to solve is
what shall he do with his feet and hands
His hands he can put in his poke
when everything else fails, and he mos
devoutly wishes that he could dispose o.
his feet in the same manner.
What shall he talk about after the topic
of the weather is exhausted? Does sh,
notice his side -whiskcrs, and think then
becoming? Does she like the way hi:
hair is parted? and does she think a blu.
neck-tic becoming to him?
All these vcxed questions pass through
his mind, and he sits on the corner of ;
chair, and looks at her, and thinks how
charming she is, and would give all hi
spare money for the courage to rise anC
take seat beside her on the sofa, whcr.
she has left room for him, and wants hin
to sit, no doubt. But then a woman may
not express her mind ON such thing.
His heart sinks as he hears in the mex
room the old mans sonorous "Ahem
ahame!' and knows by the rafting o
things generally that the parents of hi
love are preparing to retire to their bed
room, which joins the parlor, and i
separated from it by thin partition
which gives an easy passage to sound
and conveys to ears maternal and patcrna
every "klss of youth and love- he ma,
give to Mary Jane, and the little feminin
squeak which he knows will attend ever,
such performance.
And he revolves anxlously within hi
own mind what diabolical scheme of ven
geance against lovers does possess tn
brains of the majority of house carpen
tiers in this world which induces them t.
construct houses with bedrooms for tn
old folks adjoining the parlors.
He trembles every time he hears doc
open anywhere, lest those enJants terribl
may be about to make their advent, ant
his heart goes up like the mercury in dog
days as he hears the noisy tread of thei
feet as they ascend to regions above TO
their nocturnal siesta.
But in spite of all these minor troubles
and a legion of others besides, our youns
man is happy; for he is young, and tin
glamour of first love is over him, and w
suppose he would not dispense with tn
pleasure of counting for anything in tn
world.-Kate Thorn, in N. Y. Weekly.