The Andrew County Republican. [volume] (Savannah, Mo.) 1871-1876, 1876-06-08
Love and ~Ilimburger.

Some months ago, a youth in this or
some other city took a fancy to a maid
en- fair, and began to be polite to her.
He met her when he could ut parties
and that sort Of thing, and occasionally
he called TO see her at home. She liked
the young man, and smiled sweetly
when his name was mentioned. He
was Augustus, and she was Mary Jane
Augustus wasn't worth a cent financial
", but he had a capital Of hope that
surpassed the treasures Of the Fourth
National Bank.
Mary Jane had n father whose name
was Jones. He didn't fancy Augustus,
and didn t like to have him spooning
around Mary Jane. But he was a
shrewd and sensible old duffer, and he
knew, II he raised his voice in opposi.
ton, that Mary James liking would DO
strengthened into regular red-hot, dia-
mond.pin, flat-footed love. So he kept
still and pondered, and then he hit on n
plan to smash the courtship Of Au-
gustus into smithereens.
At the clearinghouse where Au-
custus lived, there lived also two youths
of his age and sex, who were as full OF
mischief as a caucus is of seekers for
Office. So Papa Jones went to them
and unfolded his plans, and offered
them $40 apiece to bring it to Il sue
cessful end. Within n week they had
the money, and this is how they earned
it: >,
Augustus was to call on his Mary
Jane that evening, so OF course he put
on his pest clothes for the occasion.
Half an hour before he went to his
, room to dress his friends went there
: and took his best coat from the ward
= robe. They ripped open the lining be-
tween the shoulders and put inside n
q couple of very thin slices of Limburger
cheese. You know what that is If you
have any familiarity with German beer
a halls.
h Augustus dressed and started for old
Jones's house. He changed his seat
two or three times in the street-car,
a and, when he reached the doorstep, he
turned again and again, like a dog about
!. to lie down; but twas no use. He
@ usually occupied a seat on the sofa, at
Mary James side; but that evening she
was inclined to dignity, and occupied
d an armchair a couple of yards away.
l. She went twice out of the room to dip
her handkerchief in CDlogne-water, and
n the second time she brought the bottle
and offered some to Augustus.
Il After he had gone home and changed
N his clothes, one of the boys took him
II out to walk, while the other restored
ID the coat to its former condition. He
examined it very carefully before he
II went to bed, and naturally discovered
,r nothing wrong, except the scent of the
IN roses which fingered there still.
r. But when, three evenings later, ht
II. again visited Mary Jane, the trick was
repeated. Old Jones had taken care t.
" hide the Colognc-water and every thing
in else of that character, so that the OF
Sc Tense of the Limburger could not b.
condoned. The fair maiden stood it TO
half an hour, then she tainted n calle'
for the old folks. She was borne to he
room, and Augustus was sent home
Tn Next morning he received a highly per
III fumed note (white-rose was the odor
nc exhaled) which toldhim that for the FL
e. ture they had better be friends only
~ hoped it would be In SRee % open h air. a sn
she would try to keep to windward.-
Chicago 1rtbUne.