Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1876-04-15
A LITTLE MISUNDERSTANDING
The Facts About the Horse Race.
From the Philadelphia Bulletin.

From the PhIlad s'phia Bulletin.
There was some horsc-racing over at
the Blank course one day last fall, and
Butterwick attended to witless it. On his
way home, in he afternoon, he %encOunt-
cred Rev. DIR. Potts, a clergyman, who
knew no more about hOrse-racing than
Il HindOO knows about :.seyen up =" But
terick, however, took for granted in his
usual way that the doctor was familiar
with the subject, and, taking a seat beside
him, he remarked: pa
Il was out on the Blank Course to-day
to see I.ongfellow."
'Indeed! Was he there?. Where did
you say he was?r
"Why, owe yer at the course. l saw
him and General Harvey, and a lot more
of 'em. He run agin General Harvey,
and it created 4 big excitement, too; but
he beat the General badly, and the way
the crowd cheered him was wonderful.
They say that a good deal of money
changed hands. The fact is, L had IL
small bet OH the General myself"
"YOu don't mean to say that Longfel-
low actually beat General Harvey 2"
Yes, | do! Beat him the worst kind.
You'd hardly've thought, ROW would
yOu? | was never more surprised i'll my
life. What's queer about it is that he
seemed just us fresh afterwards as before
he commenced. Didn't faze a bit. Why,
instead OF wanting to rest, he was jump
lug about just as lively /; and when the
crowd began to push around him he
kicked n boy in the stomach and doubled
him up-nearly killed him. Oh, he's
tgialyaI Z -p,l1n-t trpctH him az IA, nc
| could see him.
This is simply astonishing" said the
doctor. Il wouldn't nave believed it
possible. Are you sure it was Longfel-
low, Mr.. Butterwick?
why, certainly, of course; I've seer
him often before. And. after breathing
awhile, he and Maggie Mitchell came
out, and rs soon aslthey stepped OFF he
put on an extra spur or two and led her
by the neck all around the place. and
she came in putting and blowing and
nearly exhausted. L never took much
stock in her anyway Z
Lied her by the neck. Why, this is
the most S%candaIOuS conduct L ever
heard of. Mr.. Butterwick, you must GER
tainly be joking"
IL pledge you my word it's the SOL
emn truth. L saw it myself. And after
that Judge Fullerton and General Har-
ney they took 4 turn together, and that
WAS the prettieSt contest OF h day.
First the Judged beat the General, and
then the Geperald put in the big hicks
and give it to the Jndge,S aud the stwOid
be about even for awhile, and all of q
sudden the General would give a kinder
jerk or two, and leave the Judge just no.
where's, and by the time the General
passed the third quarter the Judge keel
ed over against the fence II gave in.
They say he broke his leg, bat L don't
know if that's so or not. Anyway he
vas used up. If he'd passed that quar-
he might have been all right"
"What was the matter with that quar-
ter? Wasn't it good"
a"Oh, yes But you see the Judge
must have lost hiswind or something
and L reckon when he tumbled it was
something like a faint you know"
Served him right for engaging in
such a brutal contest"
SWELL, L dunno. Depends on how you
look at such things. And when that was
over Longfellow entered with Matte
Evelyn. He kept shooting past her all
the time, and this worried her so that
she ran a little to one side and somehow,
l dunno how it happened, but his legs
kinder tripped her, and she rolled over
on the ground, hurt pretty bad L think,
while LOngfellow had his leg cut pretty
near to the bone" j. tnfw,
"Did any of the shots strike her?
81 don't understand YOU"
"YOu said he kept shooting close to
her, and l thought maybe some of the
bullets might have struck her."
"Why L mean that he ran past her, of
course. How in thunder could he shoot
bullets at her? fAl(l6ELE
81 thought maybe he had a gun. But
1 don't understand any Of it. 1t is the
most astounding thing l ever heard of,
at any rate"
"Now, my dear sir, / want to ask you
how LOngtellOw could manage a gun?"
"Why, as any other man does, of
course!n
"Man man! Why, merciful Moses !
you didn't think was talking about hui
man beings all this time, did you? Why,
LOngfellOw is a horse. They were rae
ing-running faces over at the course
this afternoon, and l was trying to tell
you about it,"
'You don't say So" remarked the doc
tor, with a sigh of relief. ''Well, L de-
clare, l thought you were speaking of
the poet, and 1 hardly knew whether to
believe you or not /; it seemed so strange
that he should behave in that manner"
Then Mr.. Butterwick went into the
smoking car to tell the joke to his
friends, and the doctor sat rejecting upon
the outrageous impudenee OF the men
who name their horses alter, Respectable