The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1876-01-15
LETTER FROM WASHINGTON.
WASHINGTON, ID. G., Jan. 10th, 1876

WASHINGTON, ID. G., Jan. 10th, 1876.
DEAR WluG:-The sudden, and to me
unexpected, change of proprietor at your
Office, has caused a change to come over
the spirit of my dreams as to my future
success as Il wrtest. lam at 4 loss to know
whether or not yonr new landlord y pos
Sc ,ses sufficient nerve and patience to en-
dure my weekly infections. However,
will risk this as a feeler, with Il hope that
/ he may be able to survive the terrible ordeal
for this one time.
The past week witnessed the opening of
! our gay season, and our social armament
displayed all the stars, suns and satellites
in conjunction. Receptions by day and
dances by night drew together all of beauty,
wit and gallantry our city can boast. Our
( daylight dances, once so successful in our
city, forming peculiar feature in its social
life must, fear, he numbered among the
| joys of the past; for, deprived of partners
of the opposite sex, how few of the fairer
portion of humanity find even the alluring
strains of Straus' waltzes sufficient tempta-
ton to a glide upon the best dancing floor
ever prepared for fairy feet.
! AS it were not enough to demand the
additional hour of clerical labor, thereby
depriving society of the agreeable civil
ians, some national chunk of wisdom in
the House has actually meditated the ami
hilation of our marine corps, and has Of
fered a resolution to that effect. Abolish
our marine corps. the most distractlngly
uniformed arm of the service. Now this
is altogether too much. What are the
duties of the marine corps? asks some in
| qusitive chunk from the far West, where
receptions and germans do not flourish,
and the toot horns of band of forty ill.,
struments never disturb the solemn silence
of the midnight hour with a serenade to
drowsy damsels.
With the head quarters Of the army re-
moved to ST. Louis, the fascinating depart
ment clerks incarcerated until near sunset,
and the marine corps wiped out of exist.
ence, the field Of society is left free to the
| diplomatic corps, whose members, with no
! fear OF native rivals before their eyes, will
| be more successful even than heretofore in
capturing and carrying away as wives, the
| fairest and brightest of our bellies
If we are to loose our marine corps, there
| is but one mode of redress left open, and
that is to move West Point and Annapolis
! to the seat of government; otherwise our
| city can no longer claim to be the gayest and
brightest on this side of the Atlantic. For
bid it We solons of the Senate, and table
the House resolution, as We would save
! your ambrosial locks from the irrate fin
gers of your wives melted to the destruc-
ton of your peace by the tears and lamen-
tations of yonr daughters, who 60 partner
! less to germans, and waste their sweetness
by day upon their own unappreciative sex.
! CONGRESSIONAL.
| Our ex-Confederate Congress is now in
running order; the machinery for the Win
| ter has been set in motion, well oiled, so as
| to perform its mission of accommodating to
! itself every available thing with as little
noise as possible. We are happy, for the
! voice of the Congressman, the potato man
and the oyster fiend is heard on our streets,
and we sit as it were, at the feet of the
| wise men and listen to the words of wisdom
falling from their lips.
| One of the most amusing things in the
| House, where everything is more funny
| a clown iS ha
our new members have of laying every
| thing irrespective of age, sex or previous
| condition of servitude, at the door of the
! White House. No matter what has hap
pened, from coal oil lamp explosion to
some high toned defaulter in the whisky
ring business being discovered, all is the
result of Republican administration, and
must be investigated; and whenever meas
ure of economy is deemed necessary, those
unfortunate foot balls, the army and navy,
are sure to receive some pretty hard kicks.
| Why our legislators should amuse them
selves, l am at loss to imagine, and give
up the conundrum in despair. 1t cannot
/ be to satisfy their constituents, for we know
that the great mass of the people, instead
1 of being opposed to our little army, favor
! it, and would be better satisfied if it were
| increased: for it is lamentable fact that
we are not able now to protect our frontier.
We invite emigration to our Western terri
tories, and when the tide sets in and flows
westward, the poor people dreaming of a
hesperian paradise, find the dusky savage,
rifle in hand, ready to welcome them to
hospitable graves. Better try some other
way of economizing, and let the boys in
blue alone.
A bill has been introduced in the House
| looking to the establishment of girls
reform school in the District. l am sorry
that they require reforming, but of the
necessity for the existence of such an in
stitution there can can be no doubt, and
do not know but that there should be a
sort of a Louise Home for the amendment
of the better class, for gossip every now
and then enters the brown stone front and
comes out with an apron full of scandal.
One of our mag of the West introduced
d OIL TO investigate Ine naDltS OF the ROCKY
Mountain locusts, or so-called grasshop-
pers. 1t is believed that the result of this
inquiry will show that the locusts are not
good served on the half shell as they are
on toast with wild honey; that there NOR
ais are generally bad; that, like Col Sell
ers, they have fondness for raw turnips,
and that in body they are noiser than the
House of Representatives or Democratic
convention.
THE CONTEST FOR CATERER.
Talk about the excitement regarding the
election for Speaker when the ballots were
taken 1t was nothing in comparison to
the excitement at the Capitol on last Satur-
day, over the balloting for selection of a
keeper of the House restaurant, or subter-
ranean promoter of congressional indiges,
ton under the House of Reps. The cor
ridor leading to the southeast corner of the
Capitol building, where the Committee on
pnhIic Rn;ldinos and GroundS paat ,poc