The weekly Elko independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 1872-1887, 1876-10-29
"0V You Don't Got Right Amy oud ]
Bounce You Outl."

"OV You Don't Got Right Amy Oud
Bounce Sou Oud."
The burlington Udnkcye has just got
into its new editorial room, and Is
proud to say that it has the finest,
most comfortable, complete aud con-
vemient editorial rooms in America.
They are finished oil with n little ill.,
vention which will be OF untold valuo
to the profession of journalism when it
is generally adopted, and we know TINT
1t will rapidly come into universal use
rs soon rs its meIits are understood anG
appreciated. We believe it is fully
equal III all that the term implies, to
the famous DoSardus Kicker, les, linble
to get out Of order, and less easily de-
tected 1s casual visitors. 1t is known
as "AIiddleri5's Automatic Welcome"
The sGnctum is on the same floor es the
news room, being separated from it by
q partition, i'll which is cut large win
dow, easily opened by nh automatic mr.
rnnSement. The editor ta1le is placed
in front of the window aud Near the
head of the stairs, and on tho side Of
the table next the window, directly op-
posite the editor. the v.sitOrs's chair is
placed. It has au inviting look about
1t, and its entire appearance is guile
less and commonplace. Dut the strip
OF hoor On which that chair rests is n
deception and fraud. II is nn endless
chain, like the floor Of horsepower
and is operated ut will by the editor,
WHO ms merely 10 touch splinG i'll the
floor 10 set it in notion. It's u-,eru-
lion can best DC understood by e.sonGl
inspection.
Yesterday morning, about ten
o o'clock, A1:. Bostwick came in vii:
funny siory to Tell. He naturally
Topped down into the chair that had
the strongest appearance OF belonging
to some ono else and began his usual
happy vein: ave got the richest
thing-oh! la, In, ha!-the best thin;
oh, by George! cant-oh, LA, hn,
In! Oh! it's too good! Oh! 3y
George, the richest thing! Obi it's too
loud! You must never tell where you
sssot--nl., ~ George! c::::'. &c e. i:'s
too good! You know thc-oh. hu, In,
la, oh, lie, lie, he! You know the-oh,
by George / ca Here tue cGi.of
touched the spring, mil grip under
tho bottom OF the char reached swiftly
up and caught Mr.. Eusiwick by the
cushion Of his pants. the window flew
up, and the noiselcss bet Of floor glib
ing OH its course bore the nstonislicd
Mr. BOstwick through tho window out
into the news room, half way down 10
the cnses, where he WAS received with
great applause by the delighted COM
positors. Tho window slammed down
rs soon rs ho passed through, aud
when the editorial foot WAS Withdrawn
from the spring 0nd tho chair stopped
and tho nail-grab resumed its accus-
TONED place, young Mr.. Bustwick fodnd
himself so kind Of out OF tho snncLum,
like il might DO, TINT he went slowly
and dcjectedly down the stars, rs. il
were, while aInazeInont snt on his brow,
like. .. -as. .a,..... -..
The next casual visitor was 4lr. J.
Alexis Flaxeter, tho critic. He Ind u
copy OF tho HGckcye in his hand, with
all the typographical errors marked in
rcd ink, ind his face waa 80 wrCathcd
III smiles TINT il wns impossible to tell
where his mouth ended md his eyes
began. He took the vacant chair and
spread out tho paper before him, cover
tsS1 "P VIZ - Oily
keen vision aud delicate sense OF nccur.
acy, lie said, 'nrc tho greatest cros-
scs OF my htc. Things that you never
sec arc mountains in my sight. Now
here, .you sec, lis u" Tho spring
clicked softly. like IN echo to the
editors foot. the null grab took hold
like bulldog helping burlington
troubodUur over tho garden fence, tho
chnir shot back through tho window
like n wooden giant getting Off tho
shortest hit o! profanity known IL man;
and oil wna silent agnin. Mr.. y'lnxctcr
sat very close to tho frosted window,
staring blnnkly at tho cloudcd glnss,
seeing nothing that could offer any On
plannti0n Of whnt he would havo firmly
believed WIS n landslide, had no not
heard tho editor, Rafe in his guarded
den, softly whistling, "We shall meet
but we shnll miss him."
Then there was brief interval oil
quiet In tho sanctuuI, and q rustling OF
raiment was heard on the stairs.
lovely woman entered and stood MI
awGd IN tho editorial presence. Th,
j.. u. on ita pnrt, MAS rather nervous
nII'l uncomfortable. Tho lovely wUinai
III Lub IHtll OH
slapped her little gripsack on tho table
aud opened her little subscription book
Sho said: III MN soliciting cash contri
fundamentally, exclusively aud per
cmptorily cash cOnlributionB--.iop ny of
tho church debt mud buy nm organ 10
tho Mission Chdrch Of tho FOrlorI
Sirnngcrs, nnd expect" Their
nrc times when occasion demands grca
effort. The editor bowed his lend aud
nftGr ono brief Bpnsm OF rcmorsc, fol
for tho secret spring. Tho wlndoy
won't up like n charm; tho reckless mai
grab hung back n second, rs II hold b.
n fooling Of innate delicaoy, md thci
II shat Its eyes and smothcrod It's pit,
md reached up and took lontlllik
hold OH roll OF ablo and inluontn
newspapers and network Of strin
and tape, and tho caYRlcnde backed on
into tho new5.room with colors nying
Tho chair stopped just before tho famii
inr spirit, who was washing tho forms
and ns tho lovely woman gazed mt tn
inky face she shrickcd, "Morciiu
hoaYons, whcro am and was born
down the gloomy stairway unconscious
while tho printers whose cases wcr
nearest tho wicked window hcard tll
editor singing, as Il might ho TO him
| self, "Dcarcsi sister, thou has left INC.