Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1876-03-31
SENSE AND NONSENSE.

VALUhBnR bifds-Gold eagles. V
SOMETHING that always soots-A chin.
ney-sweep. ~
Sort hearts often harden, but soft heads
never change.
WHEN to look for the music Of hat
When the band buckles TO It.
A MANS native meanness will some
times make him tell the truth where he
would naturally tell a lie.
BEWARE of dishonesty; for at last II
bitcth like n crooked whisky indictment
and stingelh like lie found out
CIR out your Paris green. All the signs
point to a very active campaign this spring
on the part Of the vivacious potato.bug.
UoNPosrToRs ought TO be rich They
are always paid by the thousand, and
think nothing Of making ten thousand
day
QuIz offers the following as a good ad.
dtion to the grammar department of ir-
regular comparisons"-hat, fiatter, nat.
terer.
A NEW YORK vagrant, who had been
fined regularly every week for begging,
requested the magistrate to fine him by
the year at reduced rate.
WE do not remember TO have seen 1t re.
marked before that the more a man loses
his temper the more temper he is said to
have.-Oinctnnat Times.
HERE is a joke too good to keep A Hart.
ford Comm man sent note asking SOth
ern, the actor, 10 favor him with visit
and to bring his friend Lord DlndTeGry
along alsol
A LANCASTER country clergyman is lee
turing on the Model Husband" He
may mean we'll, but we dislike to be talked
about in such public manner.-NOTrts.
t0ton Herald.
DEAN SWIFT was one day accosted by
drunken weaver, who, staggering against
him, said: 81 have been spinning il
out' Yes" said the Dean, "and now
you are reeling it home"
If you pass through the hen roost with
careful eye, just now, you will notice a
sadness creeping over the countenance of
the old hens. 1t is not simply the knowl-
edge that they must die, but the thought
that they must be sold for spring chick,
ems.
A YOUNG girl in Nevada, who had been
slandered by man, waited until she con.
fronted him in barber's chair, with his
face well lathered and one side shaved.
The cowhiding that ensued almost bank
Tupted the descriptive reporters. .-Cincin.
rdtt Gdzette.
A YOUNG man in London having trod
on dogs toe, was bitten so severely that
he died five days afterward. The relatives
summoned the proprietor of the animal
before magistrate, who rendered the re.
markahle decision that, there being no ev-
idence that the dog was ferocious before
being trod upon, he must dismiss the
! plant.
JOHN HENRY says that when he comes
home hungry and tired, anG finds that din.
ner isn't ready, and goes into the kitchen
to raise row with his wife, and sees the
rolling-pin lying sort of careless-like on
| the table, he suddenly feels as if he hadn't
much appetite, anyhow, and remarks that
he Just dropped in TO see if he could help
her about anything.
PROFESSOR" said Tyndall's new wife to
him on their wedding tour, what 8 the
matter with your spirit 81 That, my
| dear" said he, "is the great question.
| Our only idea of matter as distinguished
! from spirit is IFS particularly. Let n
| become 80 rarefied that its atoms cease
to be atoms, there being then no particu-
| larity, but simply one indivisible whole
and the matter has then become spirit'-
here terrific snore struck across the cur.
rent of his thoughts, and he stopped,
/ signing sadly, as he thought of the un-
reciprocity of the female intellect, and
| then took comfort in watching her face 10
| discover signs Of unconscious cerebration
and of the dual action of the two lobes of
The brain.
A COUPLE of gentlemen were playing a
game of cards for small sum in the Sale
rae saloon the other evening, says the
Eureka Sentinel when Pete Canavan,
who was sitting by looking at the gone,
remarked that few days before he had
an extraordinary run of luck, having won
nineteen straight games of seven-up.
How much were you playing for"' in
quired one Of the players. We COM
menced at dollar apiece" said Peter,
and doubled the stakes each game
WAS all the money put up?" Certain
ly," answered Peter, 1T was all on the
table in trade dollars; never play for
iawbone." How much did you rake
down after the last game?n Well, l
don't exactly remember, +" said Mr.. Cana
van, " but it was rightsmartlittle sum-
j al should say il was, /" remarked his friend,
taking out his pencil and doing a little
figuring in arithmetical progression ON
his shirt cuff you raked down exactly
five hundred and twenty -four thousand
two hundred and eighty eight trade dol
larsr Jerusalemr' exclaimed Peter, "
had no idea it was so muchl Gentlemen,
it's my treat"
A CORRESPONDENT of the Amsterdam
IN. " Democrat sends the following
"Mr. Benjamin Sage, residing in the
town of Morian, has had remarkable
encounter with deer. Mr.. Sage went to
his farm, adjoining the one on which he
lives, to feed his cattle, about six O'Clock
p. M, and on turning the corner Of his
barn was encountered by big buck,
which with his head struck Mr. Sage in
the side with such force as to send him
some distance in the snow, rendering him
helpless. Then the deer sprang upon
him with his four feet, and would have
killed him had it not been for his trusty
dog, which, on seeing the sad plight OF
his master, grabbed the deer by the nose
!, thus saving the life of Mr. Sage. The
dog and deer continued fighting. Mr.
Sage, with great difficulty, managed tC
crawl home, distance of half mile
Upon being discovered by his family ht
was taken into the house and made com
Portable, after which his son went to tho
barn to ascertain the condition Of the dos
and the deer, and found TO his surprisI
the battle still going on, though an houl
and a half had elapsed. The dogI
throat was badly mangled, but, notwilh
standing all, he came off conqueror,"
+ Mrs. Marsh's Evidence Before the In