Mexico weekly ledger., 1876-11-16
How q Book Agent Was Beaten With
4a His Own Weapons.

i .-rr#" 80 4- {
He came in briskly and sat dowr
with u jerk. One end of his paper col
lar reared over his left ear; a qualmJ
smell of last weeks clothes hung about
him. He turned his glass eyes upon
us, and, loosening his india rubber
tongue, he began:
"The Universal History of the Uni.
~verse--in 1000 installments-ffty cents
an instalment--300 engrayings-'l :
stop, my friend. Restrain the in.
tellectuai fow-dam up that torrent OF
~eloquence. Listen to me-7do you know
what has come to me since / saw you
lsst? 1t was in Octo-" ~
"But, SIR" interrupted the book
agent, "you never saw me beforei" !.
"NeVer saw you! impossible! Gould
any a who had once gazed on those
noble lineaments ever forget; themp
Gould that coy wart on the nose ever be
forgotten-or that eloquent mole on
your iron jawp Never, never! It was
in October that I met you last. Blessed
October-that month of ripeness and
sober passion! Do you know of all the
months in the year October is" sN
"Pardon me, sir,' exclaimed the
book agent, rolling his brass eyelids in
desperation; "you ire"
"Pardon me, sir; lean not allow any
man to hold the reins Of conversation
over mel will not be interrupted-to
resume my great grandmother was
the pertest women of her age that you
ever saw. She was 1872 years old, and
yet was as clipper as the best of US.
My brother, who was an inventive man,
put her on a pair of wheels, and it
would have done you good to have seen
her scoot around. [ suppose ours was
the only family who could boast of d
grandmother on wheels, and yet"
"But, sir, | am in a great hurry,
and"
"You must positively not interrupt
nae, my friend. AS | was saying before,
when a man has a family growing up
around him, it is hard to say which one
he loves best. And yet that boy of
mine, with that strawberry mark on his
left ear. There's o queer story connect
ed with that strawberry mark that
would please yOu-have you q child?"
81 am the father of thirteen miser-
able Children" he replied.
"Ah, then, you can sympathize with
my story. You have been a mother
yourself! All, who can sound the depth
of a mothers lovei 1t is rs deep as an
Artesian well, as high as q liberty pole.
1t scars like a Chinese kite, it grovels
like a ground hog. It is sweet to be a
fills us with a broad, deep, sweet"
kkpnanr CIV 7 lo-o,f - ,o,o - Irol-a
out the perplexed and desperate agent.
"Now, there you go again. You
throw me out every time. But to get
back to our conversation. l do think
he was the sweetest dog ever saw. AL
though he vas quite young when
he was born, he seemed to take to learn
ing naturally. WhenI would send him
to drive the pigs out of the yard, he
would take the pigs patronizingly by the
elr.h
"Ha! hal" laughed the book agent
dolefully, "quite a bright dog quite
blight-but would you like this univ"
"l~nCerrupting me again there! But
it don't matter. To resumc: as | said
before, the boat was very small and
quite cranky. 1t rocked wild, and the
girl became excited, and it was hard to
control her. You have doubtless been
on the water, and understand"
just here the book agent rose, his
steel joints swapping viciously. He cast
one wild, scared look around him and
made for the door. Having reached
the door, he turned and looked back
hungrily. He frightened up as if he
were going to open the conversation
again, but he gulped his sorrow down
and fed.
"Come back and see US again." we
called blandly over the stairs. "You
are such q good listener it's a pleasure
to talk to you. Yes, come again! Come
during the next Centennial!"-ANanta
Constitution.