davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
How to soothe the Baby.

Because | am old and bachelor, it is q
signal for all the mothers to hustle then
babies out of sight the minute I come in
Old bachelors are SO proyerbially stigma.
tized as baby-haters they cannot imagine
there may be an exception. Now own tc
being an exception. | have dandled hall
a score Of nephews and nieces on my knee.
and | could teach many mother thing
Or two about managing them, 50 as to Sc
cure peace aud comfort for both parties
For instance, baby at our house to-day
cried and screamed by the hour. I heard
the mother say that she was awake all night
with it because ofits crossness !; and today
one and another tpmbled and tossed it in
orde 7 to quiet it, until | was sure its poor
little sides were sore.
"Now, Martha Jane" | said, "just hear
to me minute and throw away your pep
permint and stuff. Undress that child; its
clothes are all in a bunch about it. How
would you feel with your clothing in that
style? Then wiring soft towel ont ofyery
warm water and wrap it smoothly about
its whole body just under its arms. Then
quickly wrap little WOODEN blanket about
that, put on its night-gown and soethe it .
minute, and it will drop into the sweetest
sleep ever a baby had.
Martha did not more than half believe
me-, but was 50 worn out that she tried it.
She laid the poor tired little thing down
on some soft pillows in his little carriage,
after she had packed him, and il a few min
utes, BY gently rolling him back and forth,
he sunk into peaceful slumber.
IfyouIl believe it, that woman only said
in a stage whisper to Amaryllis, Who
would have expected an old bachelor 70
know so much about babies p
That's all the thanks I get. But the
baby would thank me if it knew how. It
was pay enough to see it so comfortable,
however. This simple treatment will re-
lieye a suffering child nine cases out Of
ten. Any difficulty Of the bowels Or langs
will be the better for good warm pack,
and it is a remedy always at hand, and one
that costs nothing. The matter Of the fan
nel blanket, however, is highly important
So too is tia necessity that the towel be
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
A Sail0r,s Story

At my return from my first voyage,
whaling, my mother made me stay at home
evenings, and spin yarns about "furrin
parts, " when | wanted to be out sparkin
and, out Of revenge, I used to tell her
some pretty tough stories. told her once,
when we were out on the Indian Ocean,
the weather became foul and We didn'tsee
the sun for twenty days. We lost our reck-
onlng, but kept sailing along, till, finally,
we made land. The captain couldn't tell
what land it was, but thought it might be
Sugar Island, and sure enough it was a
mountain Of pure sugar
We landed and took in good supply.
AT the foot Of the mountain, we saw what
we took to be small lake, but, on APP
preaching it, found it was river OF honey
flowing out from the base of this noun
tain We had nothing but oil casks aboard
Or We should have brought cargo home
instead Of whale-oil We got entirely out
Of meat, and | don't know what we should
have done if it had not been for the flying
fish; they would fly against the sails and
drop on deck, and we salted down fifty
barrels, which lasted the whole voyage
Mother could not quite stand that yarn
and accused me of making it up!
"Well," ] said, "if you don't believe that
| will tell you what | did see. We were
crossing the Red Sea, when heavy storm
came on and We were obliged to anchor
for the night. The next morning being
clear and pleasant, all hands were called
To help heaTe up the anchor; butt would
not heare worth one cent. We thought
it had got caught under rock. Finally
the captain, who weigbed 240 pounds, ad
ded bis weight to the capstsn, and we start.
ed it. Now, mother, when that al chor
came above water, what do you suppose
was in the aue? ..Well, I don't know,
my son; what was it?n '.Why, it was
large, old-fashioned wheel, and the captain
said at once 1t was one Of Pharaoh's char
lot wheels "Well, my son, says the old
lady, u can believe that, for we read Of
these things in the Bible. But don't tell
me anything more about flying fish"
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
NaMsnanAr VeracitY-

Some people have an idea that newspa-
pers will lie. Others are so wise that they
vii! only believea newspaper report when
they think it would be easier for the paper
to tell the truth than to tell lie. Others
think it the evidence Of flashing wit to re,
ject with derisiye laugh any yeYidence for
authority which comes from "the papers.
To such an extent has this thoughtless
judgement Of the press been carried that
much of its sphere of usefulness has been
circumscribed. It is true there must be
some occasion for this widespread impress
sion-"there must be some fire where there
is so much smoke; yet how many men
can show record for correctness, accura
cy, and truthfuIness that will at once com.
pare with the average newspaper The
editor gathers his news from thousand
sources, from acquaintance8 and strangers,
from letters and papers. He sits and cuIIs.
hunts and details, and endeaYors to get
"the straight" Of every story he publishes,
for it goes to the world over his own name
and he knows that in a great measure he
will be held respons ible. The private in
dividuaI hears a piece of gossip, listens
earelessly, tells It to another with equal
carelessness, and if called upon for details
il nine cases out Of ten cannot give enough
Of them to make an intelligent item for the
paper. @Writing makes an exact man, =
says Lord Bacon; the newspaper yerifes
the truth Of the statement. Let any one
who doubts this sit down and put on pa
per sorle piece Of gossip, with the purpose
of having it printed over his own name,
and he will see in a moment how little he
knows about matter he thought himself
familiar with. And he will wonder, not
that the newspaper should contain oc-
casional inaccuracies and misstatements,
but that it contains so few. And his won
der will wonderfully increase when he re-
members that the editor has to depend for
much Of what he publishes on the common
run Of mankind.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
Al Sermon for Girls.

"Wildness,r writes Gail Hamilton, "is a
thing which girls cannot afford No art
can restore to the grape its bloom. Fam
iIiarity without love, without confidence,
without regard, is destructive Of all that
makes woman exalting and ennobling:
sThe world is wide. these things are SMALL
They may be nothing, but they are all"
Nothing? It is the first duty of wo-
man to be lady. Good breeding is good
sense. Bad manners in women is i'm
morality. Awkwardness may be ineradi-
cable. Bashfulness is constitutional Ig-
norance o. etiquette is the result of cir
cumstances. All can be condoned, and do
not Danish man or woman from the ameni-
ties Of their kind. But selfpossession, un-
shrinking and aggressive coarseness of
demeanor may be reckoned as State
prison offence, and certainly merits the
mild form of restraint called Imprisonment
for life. It is a shame for women to be
ectured on their manners. Tt is bitter
shame that they need it. Women are the
umpires ofsociety, It is they to whom all
mooted poiats should be referred To be
a lady is more than to be prince. A lady
is always in her right inaienably worthy
Of respect 70 a lady, prince and peasant
alike bow. Do not wish to dance with the
prince unsought. Feel differently. Be such
that yon confer Ionor, Carry yourself so
IoftiIy that mea will look up to you for re-
ward, not at YOU in rsbuke. The natural
sentiment Of man toward woman is rever-
ence He loses a large means of grace
when he is obliged to account her a being
to be trained into propriety. A mans
ideal is not wounded when woman fails
IN worldly wisdom, but If in grace, in SEN
timent, in delicacy, in kindness, she should
be found wanting, he receives an inward
hurt"
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

lars month, payable in adyance-pay to
commence now," continued he, placing
two ten dollar notes on the table, before
the astonished barber, who it is almost I'M
necessary to state, accepted the PROPOSE
ton, and was still more surprised to learn
that it was Billy Gibbons himself who hir-
ed him.
In few days the inhabitants ofthat vii
lage were astonisbed by the appearance OF
a new barber shop, far surprising the 9th
er in elegance Of appointments, and in
which, with new mugs, soaps razors and
perfumes, stood barber and assistant,
ready to do duty on the heads and boards
Of people. Over the door was inscribed,
William Harrington, shaving and hair
dressing saloon
The people were not long in ascertain
ing, or slow in availing themselves Of the
privileges Of this establishment and it is
not to be wondered that it was crowded
ard the other deserted. The other held
out some weeks, suspecting this free shaw
ing-for Bill kept his secret well-was but
a dodge to entice customers away who
would soon be charged as usual but at
| the end of six months he ound Billy work
ing away as usual charging not a cent for
his labor, and having money To spend in
the bargain, he came to the conclusion that
he must have drawn prize in the lottery,
or stumbled upon gold mine and was
keeping barber shop for fun, SO lie closed
his shop in despair and left the place.
Meanwhile Bill Harrington kept on busy
as bee, and one f morning his employ
er stepped in, and without word sat
down and was shaved in rising from his
seat he asked to see the score for the six
months past. The barber exhibited it, and
after careful calculation, the old man
said:
"Plenty Of customers, ell ?"
"Lots Of en-" said the barber, never
did such business in my life"
"Well, replied Money Bags, "you have
kept the account well, | have paid you
one hundred and twenty dollars for your
services-all right-and there are three
hundred ard fifty charged for shaving all
that applied; now this furniture cost one
hundred and two dollars. Here it is. Now
you own this furniture, and are to have
this shop, rent free, for six months longer,
and after to-day you are to charge the reg
ular price for your work, ryour pay stops
to-day"
This, Of course, the barber gladly assent
ed to.
"But," said the old man on leaving,
take care that you never cheat a man by
charging ten times the usual price for
shave, or it may be another old Billy Glib
bons"
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
"A Partner for Life.

What is the aim Of nine out Of ten Of the
young ladies who have suitors visiting
them? Do they have any Cettainly
most Of them do, only to forget it. A little
presence ofmind on these occasions, would
save future unhappiness. The young gen
tleman, in many instances, is agreeable,
cay and handsome; and this dazzles the
eyes 50 utterly, that the young lady refuses
10 look farther. She should satisfy her
self on such points as these "Will those
eyes, in which Cupid now dances 10 mer-
rily, always find expression from the love
of d true soul? Now he says many pleas
ant things, and draws pretty pictures Tor
the future. Does he ga tomorrow fo york
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
How We Do III.

A patron Of a certain newspaper once
said to the publisher: "Mr. Printer, how
is it you haye never called on me for pay
for your paper?" "Oh,o said the man Of
types, we never AK a gentleman for mon
ey.' Indeed" replied the patron, chow
do you manage to get along when they
don't pay?" "Why," said the editor, "af-
ter a certain time We conclude that be is
not a gentleman, and we ask him." ttOh
-ah-yes-I see Mr.. Editor, please give
me q receipt, = and hands him a v. "Nake
ny name all right On your books"
Artemos Ward had an adventure in
Boston which resulted as follows: [ re
turned IN the Hoss Car part way. A poorly
girl in spectaeles sot near me, and was tel
lin young man how much he reminded
her Of young man she used to know in
Warlthom. Poorly soon the young man
got ou-. Snliin' in a seanctiv manner, /
said to the girl in spectaeles- Don't Ire
mind you of somebody you used to know p
Yes, she said, you do remind me ofone
man, but he was sent to the penitentiary
for stealth a barrel Of msckerel; he died
there, so eonclood you amt him. ]
didn't pnrsoo the conversation.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
CIalsnish PeonIc.

ClannIsh people are queer beings. They
generally form small social circle in
some country town. They see, care for,
and know only their own set; al else are
consigned to outer darkness, and regarded
AZ mere trash, to be used or endured rs
may best suit their mode. They are but a
grotesqne nioekery Of responsibility and
faneied Importance. They are cold, heart
less, selfish, With narrow views Of life, and
no sympathy with the weary, toiling class
of men and women, ii worn Or ragged gar
ments.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
SagaciOug Mules

A gentleman who is too modest to allow
us to use his name, furnishes us with the
following instance Of sagacity, which he
yesterday saw displayed by pair Of mules
those curious spotted fellows belonging
TO Hank Blanchard, Hank and John Fa-
gan were seated in a buggy behind the
mules, driving along South G street near
the Divide. Suddenly the animals halted.
Whipping and coaxing were alike in vain ;
they would not move What to make Of
this Hank didn't know, as the mules had
never before so conducted themselves
Seeing that the animals constantly turned
their heads in one direction. Mr.. Pagan
began to look that way to see what it was
that SO strangely attracted their attention.
Ina moment he dropped on it. It was a
shingle which read, "Hay, $23 per ton, y
the regular retail price being $25. The
mules had observed this and coald not be
moved beyond it until Hank got out of the
buggy, went into the place, and came back,
pretending that he had ordered ten tons OF.
the article at the reduced rates. Then
they trotted off perfectly content Tig-
ginia Nee.) Enterprise.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

A grand jury ignored d bill against an
old negro for stealing chickens, and before
diseharging him from custody, the Judge
made him stand reprimanded, and con
.eluded thus You may go now, John,
.(shaking hir finger at him, and let me
warn you never to appear here again.
John, with delight beanins IN his eyes,
and . broad grin displaying a beautiful
row 0fiVory3 replied wouldn't baen
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
The Way to CONQUER.

It'll master it., said the axe, and bis
blows fell heavily on the iron; but every
blow made his edge more blunt till he
ceased to strike.
Leave it to me, said the saw and with
his relentless teeth he worked backward
and forward on It's surface, till they were
all worn down OF broken; then he fell
aside.
"Hal ha Y said the hammer q knew
you wouldn't succeed; I'll show you the
way, but at his first fierce stroke, of
few his head, and the iron remained as
before
@shall | try? asked the soft, small
lame. But they all despised the fame
but he curved gently round the iron, and
embraced 1t, and never left it until itmelt-
ed under his irresistible influence.
There are hearts hard enough to resist
tae force of wrath, the malice of persecu-
ton, and the fury of pride, SO as to make
heir acts recoil on their adyersaries but
there is a power stronger than any ot
these, and hard indeed is the heart that
can resist love.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13
Poetry.
INSTINCTS.

Heaven gave the bee desire for sweets,
Nor heaven denies her flowers
The thirsty land for moisture waits,
Nor heaven withholds its showers.
No sooner are the babes alarms
To mothers ears exprees'd,
lie finds shelter in her arms
His solace at her breast.
Nor are the instincts Of the heart
Less subjects Of heavens care;
Nor would it sympathies impart
Merely to perish there
The heart that yearns for kinred mind
To share its bliss or pain:
That knows to love, shall surely find
a heart that loves again.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

No man knows, no man has the right to
know that he is a temperate drinker. Ha-
man frailty is stamped On every page Of
life. Govern thyself, is one Of the hard
est naxirns that ever was dedueed.
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

A new style Of troWsers for boys has
been invented il Boston. The articles
have a eogTlHs bottom, sheet iron knees
riE yssefaaa09 rockets tQ
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

"sad thing To lose your wife, said d
friend to a Vermonter who stood at the
grave of his wife We'll toleral,Ie sad,
The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-10-13

johnny, you're a pig, SAID father to
his little three-yearo Old boy. "Now, Jim
ny, do you know what a pig is?" eyes,
pa a pig is a old hogs little boy"
An illinois stump speaker who was blow
ing around that he carried four rebel bull
lets as proofs Of his patriotism, was found
TO be carrying them in hts breechss pock-
, 1876-04-28
Die Neform=S eweeuns in
Ghicaap.

Geto'anen idreiten nibt nit StnrmIdaritt
Setbt Denn man 3u ibren @unlten zine 9fe
polnttOn nit Seuer unb Sbwert mad,t, Il
Utrtt. Die barauf folsenbe 8eattion metltens
oe Sin9e auf ben Stanbpunft auriid, no fl,
JUROR iparen, nnb a0ermals mnB Iue8 Den
Ia n91an1en Sang Der Heform iiberlaiien mer
Ell. Gs sebt aber in Chicago nibt anbers
vie IN Ybtlaoelpbla, III Nem Dorf etc. De
, Utagor Goblin unp 4 8eamte bon Der @iipieit,
Sblcd9o'S ilno ourd 8ahlf6l11ung in ibr Im,
setonlmen; bas oberite Staats9erltt bat er
fidrt, baB es nthts oa9e9en tbun fam, mi
nun bat man cine 9roBe UtalensSerlamm
lung gebalten, melhe bic Serreu f
orbern io1te, ibre Memter 1ieber,uleaer.
Die ySribune" nnb Die yEimes" hotttrl Al
oteter "SerIammlnn9 NIT benz 9ro6artiaIter
Aufrpano bon &betorif 9rtrolnmelt uno ipelt.
erlhltternne 2haten perlar9t nnb perfiinoet
Sas Heiultat Der groben Sene9un9 abe,
mar lpte tn,mer-nur III Gan Srancisco bal
man ieiner i3eit NIT SiStlans5@ Committee unt
ggnt)- 9erttt Nnoer8 9eat beitet bab Die
Serlammlun9 bel1loB, lene pier Strolte unr
oen Wtapor sn erluhen abSutreten, unb menr
otelelbem iit1 ipei9ern abermals SeriammlunQ
III balten. Die ySu. Staats- 3eituno" 1T pol
Sarfasmus iiber bieie sabnle &epolutinn.
Sle ia9t, man babe berelts bic @iliebuno
zines Woblfahrts>IusihuGe uno Die @rrlt.
tun9 BON Shaffotten eripartet, namentlid
ausWGrts mo man Die Sadlase nad CEN
9ebriil Der ySribune" nno yEimeS" beur,
tbeiIte, nlo tpdren aus ben G~orgdn9en n,d)t
&baten ionoern @etute aeuorben.
Jtabocm oas Obergeriht iebe abbilfe perz
met9ert, mare bic jYeit our SeibIthilfe oefom=
men, aber Die I. q. befieren Solfsflaien, Saul.
leute. Sabrifanten, &c. batten feline Courage
lno fiirtteten bon ben rbeiisloien &lalien"
oas Shllmmlte tuennn einmal baS 3etden
81 @enaIttbaten aegebeu iei.
9a oerbGlt eS ii6 in @btca9o aerobe TO,
tple anberpdltS and man bat iid eben
oieien Serbaltnifien gu fisen NIB NIT Sc.
Duh tiir Die Neform 10 iange Su nerbes, bis
o%lelelbe enolt1 su &raften tonlmt. neber Die
~Jteu=gSabl. ipel4e am IS. Ipril ltattfanS
Ihrieb Die SulnolS StaatSSeitllna I'M Yoraus
allo
SoIten babel bic Siir9er obne lInterldieo
Der Yartet fir 9errn Shomds Sopne als
Uiapor ltlmmen, 10 meroen mtr, blelbt Solptll
auf lsuem 8opfe beiteben, Sunahlt in @btca9o
eln Seitenitiid 81 benz Sritton=S oerltolSlhen
Streite in ct. 2ouIS baben. Serr Sopne
niro ntft oaran oenfen, nit Siilfe Der Ser
rem 9Srntmortb, Intbonp, 0arueo, Siuett &C.
ben 0erren Solpin tOrperlid, al Die SUIT Al
leeen, %lonoern iih oamlt beideiben, DIE Sc.
r,dte nm Siilfe anaugebeu. gSie LANCE aber
oor oielen Der Streit binaus9elhleppt mers
ben fann, brauht man Niemanoem Su Iaaen.
Snsruilden aber ipiiroe Goblin Die 9ioue
lplelen, Die Srltton. in ct. 9ouis ipielte nuo
9oDne Die bes Serrn Sperltols; D. b. inn
9linlt'sen Sale tOunte Sopre etwa aeaen
Wetbnahten baS 9lmt srbalten. ytur Der
trelipiuise &iidtritt Golpiu's fam Der Staot
olele Wlrren eriparen. Sb Der ernannte
InSld)uB lhn au iolhem freiipiui9en 0fiid.
trttt beltlmmen fam, bleibt abSuiparten.
, 1876-04-28
Mufaefhpben 1T niebt aufeebpben

Ser GntihluB oeS &aIIer8 4leranber H.,
ab,uoanfen ODER menioltenS anS idnoere 3eit
ole &eQterunq in Die Sdnoe Ses @rosfiirlten
SbronfolaerS uieoer,nleacn. oewii5ermafeu
ais 8orbcreituug Der STRENGTHENING, botte
in europa eiile grobere @eafation berporqe.
rufen, ipie man fid) bier in Mmerifa por5n-
iteuen aenei9t lift. Wenn man ieoodJ eriudet,
oaB Die pouitdnbise Ienoernng Der Yolit,f
zines &eltreihs, Die IS Sabre in europ1iIdtell
In9eleaeubeiten cine nentrale uno frieolihe
Iuar, brobt, 10 mirb mon iid bic Infre9nn9
ertlaren %tonuen, Die iid aIer feitenben politi.
lden Sreile in gang europa bemd1ti9te, DOH
no aus ite ihr Gbo in ben 2eitunaen unb oil
oen Y0rlen fanb.
@enln man ben n~euelten Beriften aus Gu,
ropa @lauben ifenfen barf, 10 iolen bic be-
oenteneiien Staatsmanner, ipelde jebt Die
@eidide Guropa's leiten, nnb al ibrer Spise
SiSmarf uno @ortjha.Dfi, iofort NIT perez.
nisten Srdften ben &aiier Ilerunber su be,
ltimmen 9einft babeu,. feline CsutihlIlle gu
d1oerni ODER tpentgltena beren Iusfiibrung i'm
a%lleemeinen Sntfueiie anisuifbieben. Jtnr
nit WiberItreben babe fth M.eranoer Ill leb.
tereml be,pegen lalien. Gin Beihlub, iidl
pom Der 6esleruns auriidsn Sieben, 1T lcbof)
%oftenbar nlbt oaorrh anI geboben, %lonOern
llr anf9eihoben morben. Sang 10, ple man
aler o'e Sade auttoBte, n'arer Die @rllnoe,
tpelte ben &atler beltttim ten. Die ru1lttde
partel TT Tim ltber ben Sopf geDadlen NM
6amlllensSfanoaler nne Selor9niB Dor elllel
Ieiualt1arnen &ataitropbc naf adt a~lt.rnlll.
dem St9l haben TIN ap.er &abrid)sinllhteli
'ad) 81 Dem Plan aeranlaBt, iib 5llrlfiuile
, 1876-04-28

faules st, nno i) rufe Sbnen i'm @eiIt Der
anfrihtiefeit rlb Sreuoidaft Su: u6ort
nit ibm!"
Oian bat in ct. 2ouis Die gebauptuns
oufseiteut, baB @eneral Sabcod oieie Sriefc
unteridla9en babeu mag unb ba6 ite @rant
nie Dor au9en sefommeu ietn t0nnten. Nber
eS itelt it'd beraus, baB er auh offi3ien Dor
VicDonalo gemarnt tpnroe. S0dii ptrod6ti9
lift Der llmitauc, baB 8idter 8rum ietue ein.
trd9lt6e Stelun9 %aufaab, nm 8ertbeiOiser
Der SdrappSsS teuers Betriiger 81 merben,
unb oaB er Su9Ietd Ibmtn1itrator BON @eue=
ral Sorp lit, aus beien YripatsBapieleu Die
Goplen obtger Sriefe Hammer, nno ipelbe
uidtlge 3ele9ramme nno Sriefe entbielten +,
lie 9elten jrst ais ubelor9t unb an9ebo.
b II, nub Grant miro ieiuen Stenerl 0 b e IL.
Sat Grant mirfIih ale jene @arnun9en
fir uube9riinoete Serldnmoun9en sebal.
ten, benen er feine 6iidfiht ibenfte, neil Ell
iid fir einen NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. batten
mir bei,abe seidrieben - Wtenidenfennei
belt, oper oh er ieine gioesleiituns, baB ell
DtacO onalpS iblehten @barafter nibt &c.
tannt babe. ishr leidt scnonimen bat, wirr
lpobl lebr balb nntcrindt tperben.