National Republican., 1876-01-22
A MELANCHOLY BsING WHO CAVRB
HEART BOWED IOWN BY WOE
A BARTENDER DEFICIENT. IN DRESS

West End, among a dozen or more old buildings,
as rickety and worn as itself, stands this rugged
old structure, with its worm-esten beams OF wood
in the ceiling and its shattered fioors shaky from
years CT constant usage and rare repairs. In and
about the place everything seems to comport we'll
with its inmates and the peculiar business trans
acted there. And taken all in all 1t might be
called "the dingy dispensary Of justice"
The keeper" is one of natures most pecu-
liar creation s, whose ecoentricities delight the
b)y1 and Cfsen are study for those VINO from
c1rcs!ty or oficIal duty coms in contact with the
and believes as firmly as adamantine is hard that
be knows II ALL and during his ohcial life he has
sent many thousands TO the Police Court dock 70
receive the sentence Of the law. During ONCE
hours he always sits crouched in large armed
chair with bis knees planted against the edge
Of broad ssa L. taP e H,b Sin uS
through the long years Of his existence, and
the manner in which he periodically runs his
he is proud of tho barren feature. His
eyes are small and restless, and seem continually
occupied in blinking, so much SO that they nave
shaken all the winkers out, and look quite as
bald as his head. He always looks at prisoner
with o smirking expression, in which his face as
decides upon The charge against him, whether it
be sufficient or not to send him into court, his
countenance is illumined with radiance which
is the personIfcaton He erudite In classic
lore and claims Shakespeare as his Bible, his
coatseeve as bis handkerchief and heaven as his
home: but as there Is awidespreaa diversity Of
claim we will not attemp: to say how good IL Is,
but simply leave his deeds and time to decide.
card and the Way he plays him in his oficial
games is often source OF coDsternauon 10 the
prisoners, and at times fund OF amusement to
the crowd of curious and idle citizens OF all races,
classes and conditions who gather about the sta.
tion at the morning dispensation ot temporary
justice.
The keeper came down like wolf on the toid,
And stood by the wicket gate hercS and oo!d;
Rbadsmanthine glitters dTelf ~ in nist MS eye,
and turning to his trump card he said softly:
Come, gentle Marcus, come; bring forth the pris-
oners, one and all, and in silence sit them here
Bring for n the man who, in the sombre shades OF
sable night, did in the gutter fall, wrapt In the
shroud Of drunkenness; and be OF the warrant S
marks let him not waste sn nS @ aS pSas 10
the place pine his useless life away; but rather
let him ascend and stand before the awful majesty
That other child, whose pensive face and mild
blue eyes deceive the too conhding world, who,
in the Silent hours Of the night, did nch from the
brceches pocket of her kind master the hlthy
lucre which the world smiles on. Lsave her not
behind. No, rather bring them all, mixed and
motley crowd, mass OF variegated humanity,
wrought out crimes gainst the law. Gentle Mar
Gus, bring them forth, and may the Justice Of my
Judgment, tempered with the mercy OF my heart,
fall on their respective heads.
But Marcus doesn't bulge.
"'TIs who bids you go, gay Marcus. pray
thee lipger not to stare and grin and twist aoou.
and act as though you were Balsam's long. cared
horse. Why do you not speed, young man.
And must l bring the bulldog, too?" said
AYE, be 1t so; the bulldog too. That cauine
creature which, moved by the ne1ccst passions
poor Spilkus the fat and sinew Of the man, go
bring him forth with all the rest.'n
Marcus licked mp the poker and disappeared in
the cark entrsnce Ofthe station, and his footsteps
were rcard upon the stairs then faintly along ths
the dungeon ball. and after series OF noises
from ringing bolts and jangling Ps6locks and
cTeak king doors, hustle was heard below, and
presently the tramp, tramp, tramp OF the culprits
on tie s'aiIcase, then in the entrance, and now
comipg through the door into the keepers room,
with Philip, The ia!ler, ard the bulldog in the
lead.
Hall" cried Philip, as they passed the keep
er's desk, and with one accord they halted.
"Narcus," said the keeper:
'sIs this the dog which barks and blteI,
That puts the people into rights,
And makes bedlam OF the nights mig su..,,
You've said 1t now," queth Marcus quick,
"A dog no other dog can lick;
Is this ones style.
Then let your guardian of the peace
TaFe out this bunch OF canine grease
And shoot It for the public peace
Or any other man.
And tie dog when passing out the door looked
back at the Keeper as though he would like to
make personal application to him for release,
and then gave It up and e0ntsntsa himself Py
overaIls, worn by sad looking man, who was
waiting for Judgment.
HARD TINES" INDEED.
"As understand it," said the keeper, 'yoar
name IndIT,dSa m Msg io,els about our markst piacss
and tells not and for that matter does not sptn."
Then you understand 1t wrong, sir. said the
and placed his eyes steasfastly on the keeper.
~ am no vagraut; have sought for work all over
this city in vain. am ready to earn an honest
ment. IT. sir, you can contire ne in Jail until the
10th OF next MONTH expect work then, and
tho 9apIy fellow ior moment, but could % not find
words to answer him. How could he? Here was
q man, strong and willing to work, pleading for
an asylum in the loathsome prison cell because
he could net obtain employ oyment enough to secure
TO him the necessaries Of life. A single man..
with nobody but himsel: 10 support, and yet un-
able to do so because work was scarce. This was
indeed sad commentary on the present hard
tiTues but under the circumstances the keeper
was compelled 10 release him, because the charge
Of vagrancy was apparently false, and the law
would not justify imprisonment out OF mere
charity.
THE MAN WHO CAVED.
Great sinners! Insolvent and drunk again
Why, William Muuson, you can't pay t|o cents
on dollar and yet you viii persist in dlIy daily.
ing with the bitter and singer
That reddens your nose
And puts holes in your clothes,
And makes rags Of your hose
As your shoe now shows,
And yet you suppose
That no one knows
Twas treated, ~ interrupted william.
I'VE ell, what If you were treated:
Is that any cause
Why you should put your paws
Into the DEVILS maws
Netwithstanding the laws
Prohibit"
The knaus of hunger, interrupted William,
frra ei nd avah
"Uh, you were hungry, were you? Well, that
alters the case. IOn can go up to court, and his
HonCr Will give you the TGrs hSnIs
eat too much, for breadland water Is very tllin'"
And the man who "caved'' was collared by Marcus
and led to the prisoners chariot, which was wait
ing outside.
HEART BOWED DOWN WITH WOE.
al want to 90 up" said an individual whose
neck was garnished with blister, and whose
face looked weary and worn.
"And why 90 up, my lonely frisnd:" said the
Must tene Must wrench this hear. with
recital OF domestic woe
"WeIi, my wife is waiting, patiently waiting
outside with q meat-sX on her shoulder and with
sulphur in her eye; and she has been telling BLll
we meet. Put me under q strong body-guard and
let go up; IT'S my only salvation and the sor-
row Of that mans face moved the keeper to send
him up.
CENTENNIAL CONVENTION.
They called 1t a Centennial convention, and q
full hundred were in attendance. II was an open
air meeting. and 1t took place oa Capitol Hill.
More were attracted to the place in the shortest
space Of time than has been the case of any other
convention ever held in the city. The subject OF
debate was whether Mary Mucks belonged to
William Benton or ohm Lyman" The meeting
was opened at precisely p. m, and the discus
sion Immediately followed. BOrroughs took the
NEGATIVE. The atirmstive oponsd with a telling ny
speech, TecitiDg thf peculiar eharacteristies OF
Lymah's disposition, pointing out tho defects,
criticsing his aims both Of omission and conmIs.
sion uEing as many effective proiane sdieetiyes
as be could conveniently handle. During the
speech Lyman Insisted on interruption. and
finally made o personal application TO Benton,
which struck him Tin the eye) as being very
forcible point, whereupon he gracefully yielded
othe argument, and amended his former stats.
ment By modifying the end Of Lyman's nose. The
convention was now opened for active business.
The debate waxed warm, the parliamentary
fencing was brilliant, the movements OF the op-
posing parties were rapid and skillfu the war Of
words was we'll supported BY telling gestures,
amendment after amendment followed, until
Benton moved TO strike of the LEFT ear Of Lyman,