The Benton record. [volume] (Benton, M.T. [Mont.]) 1875-1879, 1876-11-03
Selected Story.
ANECDOTES OF A JUDGE.

In the town of Peacham, Caledonia
County, in Vermont State, there resided,
in days past, the facetious and eccentric
Judge Mattocks. He was man noted for
his dry humor, quick wit, ready reply,
strong native talents, and eminent judicial
abilities, and in his day held prominent
position in the State, and upon the bench,
to which he was at once both an honor and
an ornament.
The following anecdote is related of him,
which is said to have occurred not many
miles hence, and is still fresh in the minds
of many, who enjoy its repetition with great
zest
The Judge and his wife had been visiting
some friends in the southern portion ofthe
State, and when on their way back were
overtaken by snow-storm. He still kept
ON, nevertheless, anxious to reach home,
as the week and the year were both near
a close; but in passing the residence ofan
old friend, he was intercepted, and induce
ments offered to him to pass the night un-
der his roof.
AS it was becoming dark, and the pros
pect of reaching the next station not very
dattering, he concluded to stop.
After seeing his fine old Morgan brown
safely stabbed and fed, himself and host
adjourned to the house where, after doing
ample Justice to the Widespread table Of
E@s--s ont fare, lro sat down to enjoy h:=
pipe and an evenings social conversation
with his friend and his family.
The Judge took the precaution to men
ton two or three times in the course of the
evening that it was habit ofhis to baths
or sponge himself all over with cold water
every morning: That to it he attributed
his general good health.
The kind lady Of the house, from these
quiet hints, supplied his chamber with q
tin-pail full Of water, together with the
necessary apparatus wherewith to perform
his ablutions.
In due course the Judge and his wife
were shown to their room, which was sit
uated at the head of the stairs that led di-
rectly up from the kitchen into the room,
and unprotected at the top by balusters,
ratings, or aught to prevent a fall and d
broken head when their host, bidding
them goodnight, left them to seek their
much needed repose.
The Judge smiled as he surveyed the
result of his gentle hints, as evinced in
the pail and its surroundings; but the laugh
wad not to be all on one side.
The lst Of January broke clear and cold
the next morning, and the Judge arose
and proceeded to his accustomed aquatic
performance.
The water in the pail had frozen over,
and in breaking it the Judge spilled .
quantity Of water, and in pouring i int
the bowl he spilled still more, which froze
almost as soon as it touched the floor.
The Judges wife censured his awkward
ness, as she surveyed the little pond frozen
about the head of and down the stairs.
The Judge put on his slippers and step
ped manfully up to the water-pail, which
sat near the head of the stairs, to begin
when, unwittingly stepping upon The ice
his feet suddenly went out from under him.
and "accoutred o. he was" slid-bumT
bump, thump-down stairs, through tho
door-whose hasp broke-into the kitchen
.tullt@ngth, where the women folks we're
busily preparing breakfast.
Getting upon bis feet as quickly as pos
sible, he exclaimed:
"Ladies, I wish you ) Happy New
Year"
He then skipped up stairs, followed b
bursts of laughter from the occupants 9
the kitchen, whose culinary operations vert
thus ludicrously interrupted.
1t is said that those females had 2 VeIg
different idea Of the Judges judicial ablii
ties from that day.
The Judge, although favorite with th'
fair sex, and attending parties, balls,ete.
wherever there were ladies, had neFei
learned to dance, nor did be ever join i
any Terpsiehorean levity but once.
While attending q session Of The court
held IN VI County, the young folk
made Up dance, and Judge hattoek
went ID, Of course.
After indulging IN the rosy somewhat
nothing would satisfy tha folks but tha
Indra Ma4fe.1.la rallat dance. lii win II