The tribune. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1874-1876, 1876-10-18
Items OF Interest.


A Cincinnati swell told his tailor that
he wouldn't pay for "that last epilepsy"
It was discovered that he meant "bad
it."
Now is the time for husking bees.
The bee should be firmly seized blythe
responsive end, and-well, you can de-
pend upon the bee for further instruc-
tions.
A story is floating about in the papers
to the effect that large organization of
beggars exists in New York city, pre-
sided over by q woman and having 8
treasurer and secretary, the latter being
a beautiful mulatto girl.
"You see,, said Uncle Job, "my
wife's curious woman. She scrimped,
and saved, and almost starved all Of us
to get our parlor furnished nice, and
now che won't let us go into it, and
haint even had the window blinds Of it
woman I"
A Canadian sportsman declares that
the speckled trout in Ontario have been
killed by warm water. The woods have
been cut down, and the sun, shining up
on the water from morning till night,
heats the streams. He asks the farmers
to plant willow limbs along the waters
edge to shade the brooks and give the
trout a chanoe-tob be caught by anglers.
A lady, in describing to an irreverent
boy an occurrence in which his father
figured, closed by remsrkipg: ct am
sorry to say that the thing ended by
your father losing his temper" "Did
father lose his temper 2" exclaimed the
young scapegrace "then I hope he'll
never find it again, for it was the worst
temper ever heard of.
at TichEorne meeting held in Lon
don recently, Mr. Guilford Onslow said
he lad addressed three hundred and
fifty-fve public meetings on the SUBJ
ject. He claimed that evidence had
been secured since the trial whereby
they could trace Roger Tichborne's
movements from the time he left Eng
land to the moment he was recognized
by Lis mother.
One day Bill had company to dine will.
him, and his wife, wishing William to
appear we'll, quietly admonished him to
be careful what he said. All went we'll
till Bill got his potatoes well mashed,
when he said: "Dolly, parse the grease |"
"Why, William" said his wife, "you
should call it gravy" "WaI," says
Bill, - guess If get it on your table
cloth it would be grease" The guests
shouted.
The following was copied literally
from an old tombstone in Scotland
Here lies the body Of Alexander M'Pherson,
Who was very e1traordira ary person,
Who WAS two yards high in his stocking feet,
And kept his accouterments clean and neat,
He was slew
1t the battle Of Waterloo,
Plump through
Tie gullet it went in at his throat,
Aud came out at the back Of his coat.
A fashionable season at the watering
places is over, and when q couple of
city ladies who lived in the rear of their
dwelling all the summer meet on the
sti eet they greet each other with:
"Why, how tanned you are! When did
you get back2' And they are just as
happy, apparently, as if they had squan
Branch and had not stained their faces
with certain preparation "with intent
to deceive"
An auctioneer relates the following
A year or more the auctioneer had for
sale lot of homeopathic medicines. All
the: medicines were dumped into one
pile and disposed Of in one lot, there
being various kinds of medicine in the
mass. A boarding house keeper bought
the lot, and some days after the pur-
chase the auctioneer asked her: What
cid you want with the that homeopathic
medicine, Mrs. -2" She replied
81 thought I could use it, and it was
cheap, 80 crushed it under the roller
and then filled my sugar bowls with it.
The boarders seemed to like il, and es-
pccially when powdered over pies"