The Rutland daily globe. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1873-1877, 1876-09-11
Short Stops.

Tom Thumb Is exhibiting himself again.
The cotton growers diity: Johnny fill
up the boll,"
An English schoolmastcr died recently at
Hammersmith, aged 103 years.
A country newspaper with paroxysmal
proof-reader says that Beecher has de-
manded change of Venus.
Parson Brownow is we'll enough to sit up
on his elbow and auathematize the democ-
racy in cursory manner.
Beecher in recent letter speaks of the
"pensive applc-orchard." Probably he
likes to go there to con-cider.
They say the Princess Louise has epert
great deal of time in the investigation of
spiritualism, and is more than half inclined
to believe in it.
"In the fall the young mans ulster turns to
thoughts OF winter woes;
In the fall the blithe mosquito dips his siphoD
in your nose"
A logical witness gave his age at eight
and sixty years. "Why not siXty-eight ?"
Because had my eight years before l did
the sixty"
1t is q fact that savages who live on plain,
simple fare, do not attain so great an aver
age age as the civilized people who indulge
in rich cookery.
Lulu ''the champion female trapezist of
the world" lately fell and dislocated her
hip in London. The attending physician
discovered that Lulu is "a man
'The single scull !" exclaimed an
old lady as she laid down the morning pa
per. "My gracious I didn't know there
was race of men with double skulls"
Basket political meetings are very pop
ular in Indiana. The farmers bring their
dinners and make a day of it. Fully
5000 people were present at one in Madi-
son.
lovely female wrtes to"the Hartford
Times: "Down at Long Branch the other
night it actually felt good to pull about
three blankets over the still beautiful form
of yours truly.
Nothing will surprise married man so
much as to go home and see his wife limp
ing round the house with her little toe
bsndaged, saying that she doesn't see why
he has to keep such an edge on his razor.
The picnic season will soon be over, and
the sapient small boy will simultaneously
withdraw from several Sabbath schools
and return to his usual condition of relig-
lous inactivity Worcester Press.
News from Turkey says: ''The new
Sultan will publish no hiatt Of accession.
He says that enough hats have already
been published" 1t is sweet 10 know that
the new Sultan, instead of sclssoring his
artery, is going to ''shoot his hatt.-Ne,o
York Graphic.
The Graphio says the following are some
of the rhymes in Browning's new poem
"Circle' and "work ILL" twas hard"
"hazard;" "whitewashed sides of it," "far
and wide so fit" grunt is'tf" "contrapun-
fist" ''proven," Beethoven" "my house."
'pious;" ''pontiif," "won'tif;" ''lamdas,"
damned ass"
A philosopher says, "Planets govern not
the soul nor guide the destinies of men !;
but tritles lighter than straws are levers in
the building up of our character" How
true this is. A meteor $4,000 times as big
as the earth may sweep across the heavens
without disturbing the moral standing of a
man carrying footbah full of hot water
down stairs, when piece of soap no big
ger than pigeons egg may lift his heels
as high as the ball lamp, drag him all the
way down stairs Ia wheelbarrow, empty
the footbath in his lap, spoil his clothes
and ruin his standing in the community IN
til the frightful stories of his unbridled
profanity are hushed up.-Hawkeye.