The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-10-13
THE MAD ENGLISHMEN.


In the year 1917, two Englishmen ar
rived in Ostend, and, from their move
ments, appeared to be two singular
movements, appeared to be two singular
originals. One was short, stout and red
haired the other, tall and thin. The
short one was named Richard Mowbray,
and the tall one was William Feathering-
ton Both were in the prime of life, be.
tween As and So. From head to foot
both were gentlemen, and their passports
were in the best order and regularity.
Upon stepping ashore, they were con-
Quoted, nj their desire, TO the Scheldt
Inn, IN the Gudule street. The host was
by name Rysvoort, and his inn had by
no means the best reputation in Ostend.
The inn-keeper Mas of course enchanted
by the arrival of such unlocked for
guests. They occupied the best apart
ments in his house, and ordered the
choicest fare. The cook busted herself
III setting before them most miserable
dinner, and our host did the same by
two bottles OF execrable wine. The
islanders ate and drank with the most
perfect satisfaction. But the reckoning |!
ODOu nGil Tic uO6b WAS uullt III
ease. The next morning his enormous
charges We're paid with TIE almost in
difference. Tins far ali wa3 excellent :;
but Van Rysyoort, unused to such birds
of paradise, feared every moment they
might depart, and continue their journey
to Brussels. He very sagely concluded
that the Englishmen did not cross the sea
to see Ostend merely, and to pay roundly
for his bad cheer.
The pair, however, showed no signs of
departure diligence offered them
every opportunity. The Englishme 1
remained quietly all intercourse with
ths townspeople they avoided the sights
they troubled themselves not at all about
Every day they walked into the country,
aud ate and drank, smoked, slept, and
read the papers, and lived as quietly and
peaceably as angels. No letters came to
them-they sent none off +; the world was
dead to them, and they were dead to the
rii f..
Every third morning they regularly
paid their bill; took nothing of, although
the landlord oaily charged three fold
price for everything. Van Rysvoort
spoke usually but little, too, and troubled
himself about his guests still less, since
they paid so well; but these self-same
Englishmen took up all his attention.
He puzzled his brain over and over again,
and at last took his wife into his coun.
sells; but, as they could not even con-
Jointly solve the mystery, they consulted
With friends and neighbors upon what
these Englishmen could possibly be do
inC at Ostend.
They are spies," said one. Birds
OF flight, who are escaping punishment,
said the Others.
DO not trouble your heads; I'll tell
you what these two Englishmen are
they are nothing more or less than mad
Engiishmen. DO you know what that
means2 Listen, and I'll tell you. I
knew in London man who, in his old
age, took to leading such beggarly life
that, for fifteen years, he lived as the
most wretched of paupers. From his
fellow beggars he received every sort of
annoyance; his mode of life brought on
him cudgeIings and imprisonments; but
he still persisted. At last, one morning,
lac was found in q lane, frozen dead.
And listen he lett a will--valid, and
drawn up by notary-in which he dis
posed of more than ESQ, 900 to village |
he had never seen nor known. Confess |
that that was mad Englishman. Such |
are those now lodging in the Scheldt."
So spoke this clever man. But Van |
Rysvoort answered, "Mad or not, they |
are good customers; they live and pay
well; never complain, and if l only for |
five years could keep such guests, 1 |
should become made man"
A week after this consultation, and
three after their arrival, the Englishmen
called their host, and thus addressed
him: Herr Van Rysvoort, your hotel
plesses us very much, and, If our prcpo-
sition pleases you, we may c. ntinue our
acquaintance with each other"
"My Lord" answered the delighted
host. with d low obeisance, 81 am quite
at your disposal; say your wishes, aud
they shall becJme nine; for know what
/ owe to su-n distinguished guests.
MY go,f friend" said The little fat
man, "your hotel is by ho means so
large as il ought to be; you know you
have but three apartments in which gen
tlemen can be accommodated, and these
look upon the street. The rattle of carts
and carriages makes noise without end.
we love quiet; we are here every instant
disturbed; our health must sink nnder
II; IN short, the noise is unbearable.
am sorry to hear it, My Lord; what
can do9 You are quite right. 1t is
true the traffic is without end, but can
not shut up the street."
Certainly noy but the thing is not
so difficult, after all" W
What does My Lord meant"
he cost cannot be important, and
we will willingly bear the half"
Pray continue, my Lord cried out
the landlord, with irankness and
warmth most unusual to him."
" You have, bohind Yonr house. a