The news and herald. [volume] (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1876-1881, 1876-11-30
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THE PARIS EXPRESS,
From Harper's Weekly.

waiting train
The guard wears his official can
placed jauntily on the curling. oily
locks rdorning his head, and his
ollve-tinted face with it's huge
black mustache, is not incapable of
smiles, yet he so far departs from
the admirable example OF his Eng
lish brother, whose quiet assiduity
forms part of M unlimited capacity
for absorbing shillings, as to merely
stand ms ground before the glass
doors of the waiting-room, through
which surgcs an anxious throng, and
contents himself with the injunction,
"Tako your places"
MIR. Jeremiah Swan, armed with
portmanteau, umbrella, linen coat.
and cane, has pushed his way, glid-
Cd around, and inserted himself be-
tween his fcllow-passcngcrs with the
eeEllke celebrity for which he is dis
tlngrushed, and when the glass
portal slides back, he speeds wildly
along the platform toward the train,
actuated by determination to
OBTAIN the best place Tor himself.
Nature and circumstances have
adapted him to this noble end in an
unusual degree. There are no gen
erous impulses in the soul of Mr..
Swan likely to impel him to rash
deeds, and there is not supclflu
GUS ounce of flesh on his frame to
impede a swift rush to all grounds
of vantage over bis fellow-creaturcs
Accordingly, when painting humani-
ty, cncumbered with children, wraps
and bags, reaches the particular
railway carriage in which our travel
or has already cnsconed himself. it
IS no marvel that he is discovered to
have chosen a place by the window
IN reference to sun, the cindcrs and
the landscape, and is prepared to
beam on those who come after him
with triumphant sense Of personal
superiority.
What becomes Of those tirs'- class
passengers who find no vacant win
dow, much less any scat at all? Do
they melt away altogether from the
Mepot, like morning mist in the
sunshine, or arc they wcdgca into
second-class carriages, family ties
ruthlessly severed by the inexorable
guard of the tho olive complexion? ?
MIR. Jeremiah Swan, travelling agent
for the great American house of
Moons Polish, neither knows nor
cares, since he has been able to make
his own little arrangements for
comfort and ease. Nevertheless, he
casts q speculative eye on his future
companions.
Enter NonSic'u' and .Mudt,ue of
tho once bourgooise presumably,
who reluctantly accept the other
window, where sash and curtain are
speedily closed to preserve the
lntter's black dress and feather
trimmings from dust and sun \
French woman will endure much
martyrdom Of discomfort rather
than mar her toilet Enter q stout
German, who plumps down opposite
Mr. Swan, flushed, pcrspiring, and
converting his straw hat into fan.
Enter an apoplcctic old English
gentleman, with an apoplcctic wife
and pretty daughter.
'Bless my soul! No other place !"
grumbles patcrf;lmilias. evil the
heat be too much for you, Maria?'
81 can not endure it, L am very
sure" gasps materfamilias- ."Good-
ness knows how they manage mat
ters out of England nowT
"Try sccona-class," suggests the
husband.
II never travel secon l-c!oss," re-
turns the wife, with dignity.
ooh, mamma, please to get in
hcrc, or we shall be left implores
daughter, lowering on the step, a
vision of lovolincss, in cavalier
straw hat and black mantle.
The potent spells of feminine
charms have long been sung in
rhyme and told in story. Perhaps
the homage paid them has passed
away from earth with the minstrel
bards themselves. /. The sweet, inn
ploring eyes and blooming face of
the English girl made no more i'm
preston on the chivalrous souls of
Mr.. Swan or his German ciS,a- MS,
than rs if they had been craven
idols instead of men. "You don't
catch me giving up my seat to the
old woman; let her stay at home"
reflects Mr.. Swan, and becomes
superciliously absorbed in Ire
Eaulois, although his knowledge of
French is somewhat defective.
1t is not until the dowager, with
rebellious rustlings Of her purple
hounces and adjustment Of veil and
bonnet strings about crimson
countcnance, hns taken n middle
scat, that Mr.. Swan observes
the eighth passenger, who has
slipped IN quietly during the com
motion incident to settling the other
inmates. He is tall thin man,
eccentric in costume, with white
fatigue shoes on his feet, silk hat,
which he exchanges for Turkish
fez with dangling tassel, and large
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