The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1876-08-11
GRAVE IND GAY.

his daughter Glycerine. lie says it will
be easy to prefix Nitro, if her temper re-
sembles her mothers.
Like the Illinois penitentiary, the
state prison at Auburn, n. Y, contains
more prisoners now than ever
before, the number at the latter place
being 1888.
"A Massachusetts ma ron, IN taking
leave of her newly mar ed daughter,
said Remember, Lucy, that the first
principle in cleaning house is TO make
everybody as uncomfortable as possible
"A woman may disguise most Of her
imperfections, and seem like a thing of
beauty to the susceptible and inexper-
fenced, but no man who has been through
the wine-press of half dozen courtships
can ever be deceived by the splendor Of
glass-eye.
-" Gen'lmem," exclaimed an old
Connecticut salt, as he grasped the
brawny arm of Yale college oarsman
and called for the comSany's attention
TO lIS muhCuldI SNh
mem, thar's intelleck for yer"
sympathy is sweet swecter than
moonlight or molasses-but you can't
safely fool around a sea-sick man.asSith
tocsmuch of i, 80 long as-iae 'lIfs ss.s>aafh
enough to kick.
Men, says Adam Smith, are natu-
rally unsentimental. a man will scoop
the bottom out OF an egg without think
ing that the mother of that egg is,
perhaps, a hundred miles away in the
rain.
Unless society can effect by educa-
ton what lord Momboddo holds man TO
have done by willing it, and can get rid
of her tail, it will be wisest to let the ed
ucated classes keep their natural station
at the head.-Hdir.
-. In the examination Of an Irish case
for assault and battery, counsel, on cross
examining the witness, asked him what
he had at the first place they stopped at.
He answered, "Four glasses Of alo."
3. What next?" "Two glasses Of wine.',
"What next7" Zone glass OF brandy"
"What next?" "A fight, Of course"
What" said the pious husband,
them wicked Smiths are allowing their
children to play in the yard on Sunday.
Tomorrow I'll sick the dog on their
chickens. The judgment of Heaven must
be visited on 'em in some way.
Remorse is n mans dread preroga-
i've and is the natural accompaniment
of his constitution as a knowing, volun-
tary agent, left in tIust with his own
welfare and that of others. Remorse, II
we exclude the notion OF responsibility,
is an enigma in human nature never 70
be explained.-Lsaac Taylor.
Eyes, madam" he remarked, "wo-
mans place is in her home, amid her
children and her household duties,
while the father tolls for bread" and
then he picked up hat and thought
he'd 90 over for an hour or 80 and SEQ
what was going on at the baseball
grounds.
The great sin Of suicide is not the
sin of murder, which is an ofense against
the law, but the sin of unbelief which
consists in taking the care and keeping OF
life out of Gods hand, and assuming IL
for ones self. 1t is this act of pious un-
belief which constitutes the great sin OF
suicide. But there is not, that we seeS
any spesial reason why a christian burial
should be denied to a suicide more than
10 any man whose life has been Goddess
in fact. considering the weakness of poor
human nature, the suicides claim Tor
charity would seem Mt times to be better.
Church Union.
The Journal of Health has been col
lecting all the recipes for rheumatism
floating around the press, some OF which
are quite edifying. Par example; XIII
a big dog, and put your feet inside.
Wear sulphur in your shoes. Wear silk.
Wear flannel. Exercise. Don't exercise
PRAY fervently. Don't eat meat. Eat
all the meat you can. Don't smoke
Smoke all you like. Don't drink Drink
brandy. Carry piece OF alum IN your
pocket. Bathe. Dont Da'no
morse chestnut in your breeches pocket.
Read "Job.n Rub with kerosene. DO
not swear. Put on hot poultices.
"A man with load Of feather busters
on his arm called at house yesterday
and after repeated knocking on the ooeI'
an old lady, whose eyes were req VII"
weeping, opened it. Beg Pero0n-
didn't know as any one was dead IN inc
house. he said, meving back There ;
no one dead" she replied sadly, but
there might as well be. My daughter is
dead in love with fruit tree agent from
syracuse, and / shan't look at a currant
bush or grape vine this whole summer
without wishing that some steamboat
| had blowed me up when was baby -