Middletown transcript., 1876-06-17


committee. Altogether. it was pleas
ant scene to witness in these times,
when party spirit is SO rife.
Our New York Letter.
New YORK, June 9, 1876.
CHAPTER ON EXODUS.
And now comes the season when if
you want to see any New Yorker who
is anybody you can't find him-or her,
as the case may be. Mrs. Grundy says
that if you are anybody you must not
be in New York for the next three
months at the very least; SO if Pater-
familias, owing to hard times, falling
stocks or misplaced bets on base ball or
mustang riding, pleads lack of the
multiplicity Of 5 necessary to take
cottage at Newport, or settle the family
at Saratoga or Long Branch or Cape
May or the Centennial for the season.
Matcrfamilias draws down the corners
of her mouth with ominous determina-
ton, has the front blinds closed with a
bang, jerks down the shades with her
own hands, locks the front door and
pockets the key, gives Paterfamilias bis
breakfast in the kitchen, and after send
ing him out the back way to seek his
nasty old Office" through byways and
alleys, sits down to condole with her
daughters over the brutality Of men in
general and of the head of that family
in particular. The accumulation of dust
on the front steps and door plate is
thence forward thing to be encour-
aged, and should any indiscreet domes-
tic in basement condolences with the
girl next door dare to breathe aught Of
the true state of the case, the places
that knew her would straightway know
her no more.
HOT WEATHER
Thus it is that only we unfortunate
scribblers are supposed to show our
heads in the city this hot weather. But
for us there is no respite, and even in
these days when a fellow feels like
punching the marrow out Of his bones
to get draft through them we have to
be lodging about with true newspaper
ubiquity gathering sunstroke for our
selves and news for an Unsuitable public.
With which bid for sympathy permit
me to offer you few disjointed facts,
placing first the coolest ones can
think Of.
FREE SWIM.
The two public swimming baths
which the city boasts have been opened
this week and are gratefully appreciated
by the few that find admission thereto.
In city Of this size, which is SO sur
rounded with water the inadequacy Of
these institutions is simply shameful.
Two baths of the size of these are
merely an aggravation to the quarter Of
million people who should and would
use this great sanitary appliance were
the conveniences thereto furnished them.
Some new ones will doubtless be opened
THE REGATTA.
The Centennial Regatta of the New
York Yacht Club, which came off on
Thursday afternoon was grand sue
cess. The heat on shore only served
to set off and render more grateful the
refreshing GOODNESS and stiff bret ze on
the bay. There were twenty entries
for the race, and the spectacle formed
by the large feet of white wings and
shapely hulls flying over the water was
inspiriting indeed.
MUNICIPAL BEREAVEMENT.
We have suffered a municipal be-
reavement in the death Of the second of
the two white whales recently brought
down from the coast of Labrador for
Coup's Aquarium. One of these ami
mails, which were the first ever known
to be taken alive, died shortly after
their arrival and now the second has
followed it. The loss is severe one,
as the cost Of taking and transporting
the huge creatures was very large, but
nothing daunted, Mr.. Coup has this
week dispatched another expedition to
Labrador for a duplicate monster. Extra
care is to be taken Of their next prize
Instead Of letting him beat himself to
death in a tank it is proposed to tow
him down, at least part Of the way, by
river or canal. Who wouldn't be a
white whale this weather?
FLUNKEYIsM.
In my last I omitted mention Of an
event which caused immeasurable ex-
element among our social creme de la
creme, namely, the marriage Of real,
live English lord to beautiful Cuban.
The aristocrat who SO greatly honored
plebeian America was Lord Vaudeville,
heir to the Ducby Of Manchester and to
one Of the finest estates in England
The ham ton are ecstatic over the re-
fected glory with which the occasion
covered them, and the newspapers
plume themselves on the culture Amer
lean Duchess" and the "brilliant pedi-
gree" Of the noble fish taken in an
American matrimonial net Consider
ing that the lady is herself foreigner,
the daughter Of Cuban refugee and
belongs in no way to our republic. the
extreme Aunkeyism of this is rich in
deed. Would it not be well for the
government to repeal all taxes and OBJ
tain its revenues by selling titles to our
Goldfish aristocracy who so evidently
yearn for them ? How the bosoms Of
Lord Corruption and Lady Shoddy
would swell with pride and gratifed
ambition on receiving their patents Of
nobility and how carefully would they
gather up their skirts to save their
sacred persons from the contamination
Of contact with the common herd y
The plan is respectfully submitted to
Congress as entirely feasible and certain
to be popular.
THE RING SERPENT.