Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1876-03-03
an eye, that man was famous. Treas
ure these thoughts:

an eye, that man was famous. Treas
ure these thoughts:
$ 'Pcesy, sweet poesy, who shall estimate wha
the world owes theer"
g Mary had little lamb, its fleece as white al
snow,
And everywhere that Mary went the lamb wa
sure to GO
Jack and Gill went up the hill
TO get pail of water;
Jack fell down ana broke his crown,
And Gill came tumbling after.
For simplicity, elegance of diction
and freedom from immoral tendcn
cies, I regard those two poems in the
light of gems. They are suited to
all grades of intelligence, to every
sphere of life-to the field, to the
nursery, to the guild. Especially
should no Board of Aldermen be
without them.
Venerable fossils! write again
Nothing imp owes one so much as
friendly correspondence. Write
again-and if there is anything in
this memorial Of yours that refers to
anything III particular, do not be
backward about explaining it. We
shall always be happy to hear your
chirp. Very truly, etc,
MARX TWAIN:
"'For Senator N. W, e. S.
Senator -"
"This is an atrocious, a ruinous
epistle! Distractionw
"Well, sir, | am really sorry if
there is anything wrong about it
but--bgt--it appears to me to dodge
the water-lot question"
dodge the mischief! Oh!-but
never mind. As long as the destruc-
ton must come now, let it come com,
plete. Let it be complete--let thA
last of your performances, winch |
am about to read, make a finality of
it. am a ruined man. I had my
misgivings when I gave you the let
ter from Humboldt, asking that a
post route from Indian Gulch to Shak-
spere Gap and intermediate points,
be changed partly to the old Norman
trail. But told you it was deli
cate question, and warned you to
deal with it deftly - to answer it
dubiously, and leave them a little in
the dark. And your fatal imbecility
impelled you to make this disasterous
reply. | should think you would
stop your ears, if you were not dead
to all shame:
"WAsHINGToN, Nov. 80. EeSsrS.
Perhuus, Uug"er, ct al GENTLE
MEN:--It is a delicate question about
this Indian trail, but handled with
proper deftness and dubiousness, l
doubt not we shall succeed in some
measure or otherwise, because the
place where .the route leaves Lassen
Meadows, over beyond where these
two Sawnee chiefs, Dilapidated-Ven-
geance and Biter-of the-Clouds, were
scalped last winter, this being the
favorIte route to some, but others
prefer something else in consequence
of things, the Mormon trail leaving
Mosby's at three in the morning,
and passing through Jawbonc Flat to
Blucher, and then down by Jug-Han-
die, the road passing to the right of
it, and naturally leaving it OH the
right, too, and Dawson's on the left of
the trail where it passes to the left Of
said Dawson'S, and onward thence to
Tomahawk, thus making the route
cheaper, easier to access to all who
can get at it, and comprising all the
desirable objects so considered by
others, and therefore, comforting the
most good upon the greatest number,
and consequently | am encouraged
to hope we shall. However, I shall
be ready and happy, to afford you
still greater information upon the
subject, from time to time, as you
may desire it. and the Post-oliice De
partment be enabled to furnish it to
me. Very truly, etc.
MARK TWAIN.
"'For James w. w., U. S.
Senator.''
"Thero-now, 'rhm do you think
of that?"
"Well, I don't know, sir. It-well
it appears to me = to be dubious
enough?"
'Du-leavc the house! | am a
ruined man. Those Humboldt saw
ages never will forgive me for tang
ling their brain up with this inhuman
letter. | have lost the respect Of the
Methodist Church, the Board of Al
dermen--"
"Well, | haven't anything to say
about that, because | may have miss
ed it Il little in their eases, but | ardS
too much for the Baldwln's Ranch
people, Generaln'
"Leavc the house! Leave it for
ever and forever, tool"
| regarded that as sort of cover
intimation that my services could be
disl ensed with, and so | resigned -
I never will be private secretary to
a Senator again. You can't please
that kind of people. They don't
know anything. They can't appre-
ciate party's efforts.