, 1876-06-16
Two Mules.

"Gn" Green, a conductor on the
New York Central Railroad, is prob
ably one of the best-natured men on the
American Continent, and that very good
nature has recently led him into trouble,
which it is the purpose of our truthful
reporter to chronicle. 1t occurred to a
relative of Mr.. Green, who lives in Syra-
cuse, that he needed, to complete his
earthly happiness, a good mule team.
He asked Green to find nice pair OF
mules for him, and Green consented. A
little inquiry developed the fact that
man living in Little Falls had pair Of
angelic mules to sell, and Green went
to look at them.
The mules, in fact, constituted a
pair which would easily beat four aces
and a king, but Green did not notice
that. He only saw the air of holy calm
upon their faces; the expression of ce-
lestial calm which characteriZes every
limb and movement. He looked upon
them, and, in their serene presence,
blushed to think how often, as boy, he
had run away from Sunday school. He
bought the mules, and went his way,
resolved to lead better life. This is a
solemn resolve for a railroad conductor,
but Green meant it. he resolved to be
worthy of those mules. By his direc-
tions the mules were shipped to SYRIA
cuse in box car.
No sooner was the train under way
than the mules became possessed Of
ideas, or something. They certainly
became possessed. One reached out his
foot, and put fan light over the door.
They opened several ventilators. They
constructed bay windows all around.
By the time they had reached Syra-
cuse they had made platform car of it,
and were looking for new worlds to
conquer. The men said nothing to
Green about this, and, as the mules
were tired, they allowed themselves to
be led to the stables of the man for
whom they were purchased, and they
devoted day or two to meditation and
laying in hay. Then as the stable boy
was cleaning them off, one of them
reached out his foot, and tickled the
boy in the ribs, playfully, and the boy
Immediately put his angel plumage on.
The young man has not been back
since. A day or two after, a medium
brought around a brush, curry comb,
and half-bushel measure, which left
earth when the hostler did. The me-
dium said he had advices from the here
after to the effect that the boy had
passed rapidly through the seventh
sphere, and was probably still progress
ing. Since then, the coroner sits around
the premises, and looks up to the sky,
and sighs, and sighs. A report reached
Green that the mules had some peculi-
arities, and he went to see about it. He
explained to the owner that the mules
were all right. The boy, he said, was
probably careless. Thus reassured, the
owner went into the stable to harness
those mules. He went in leisurely
through the door. He came out hur-
riedly through the side of the barn.
Green cried tickets" but the other
man seemed to be travelling on pass.
"By Georger said Green, " this yer
dead-headin' has got to be stoppedP
He stepped in to get the opinion Of the
mules. There was crash of boards,
bursting of roof timber, and Green
sailed.
He said there was an explosion Of
nitro-gIycerine in. the barn, and the
mules smiled on. They are now back
at Little Falls; the. coroner waits for
the hostler; they have brought the Syra-
cuse man back from Salina, where he
lit, and Green is making half-hourly
applications of arnica and linament
alternately. In answer to the natural
inquiry Of the public, it may be said
that g Gil" Green does not want to buy
any more mules.-Rome Sentinel.