Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1876-10-14
NO. AZ.
Items OF Interest.

A Nevada miner staked the savings of
years on faro, lost, and then killed him
self.
Inquiring mind (reading)-"It says
here, ma, His remains were taken to
their last resting place. Why do they
say his remains wasn't he alltheres"
Another instance of the beauty of 60
ing to law has just transpired at Perth
Amboy, N. j., where it cost a man $500
to get $40 verdict against railroad
company.
A Western chap, in describing gale
of wind, says: A white dog, while at
tempting to weather the gale, was caught
with his mouth open, and turned COM
pletely inside out.
An lrishman On board vessel when
she was on the point of laundering, be-
ing desired to come On deck, as she was
going down, replied that he had no
wish to go on deck and see himself
drowned.
An old gentleman, whose nose was
not only very large, but very highly
colored, was asked by George ". how
much it had taken to paint it, "Sire,"
was his reply, 81 cannot tell, for it is
not finished yet.
The following is store sign as copied
verbatim from the original in remote
mining town: "Bibles, blackball, but
ter; testaments, tar, treacle Cody
books and gimblets condenseda eggs
and castor oil, for sale hear ~
A close listed man invited friend to
dinner, and provided only two mutton
chops. Upon removing the cover he
said: my friend, we have a Lenten
entertainment; you see your dinner be-
fore YOU" Taking the two chops upon
his own plate, his friend replied: " Yes,
bpt where is your dinner3
A person who was looking at house
the other day said he couldn't afford to
pay SO much rent. "Well, look at the
neighborhood," replied the woman.
"You can borrow fatirons next door,
coffee and tea across the street, flour and
sugar on the corner, and there's big
pile of wood belonging to the school
house right across the alley!"
The Rev. Mr.. Spooner (tenderly to
eligible widow" How beautifully en-
blematic is this of the relations OF man
and wife. See how the graceful ivy,
womanlike, clings for support to the
stalwart oak. All. dear madam, hus' :.
bands fond protection - Widow
"And supposin' the hoax is too little
and the hwy too big-what then, Mr..
Spooner9" ....
cit is impossible!" said l to French
peasant lad who was telling me tough
story about miracle working chair III
neighborirg church. "There's nothing
impossible" he answered, "but stick
with but one end; and if you go to
Chartres you'll see it," "See what9
the stick, or that there's nothing else i'm
possible?" he replied. Neither; but
you will see Chartres.
At Fossville, Cal, lives old Mr. Foss,
noted stage driver of the Pacific coast.
He has retired from business, having
grown rich, and now keeps refresh
mett saloon on the stage road. He has
collection of whips given him by diff
ferent associations and friends, which
hang on racks in his hall as trophies.
One of them, given him by the late MIR.
Ralston, is valued at $40, 900, and is
mounted with gold and richly set with
jewels.
Old Deacon Sharp never told lie,
but he used to relate this: He was
standing one day besides frog pond
and saw large garter snake make an at
tack upon an enormous big bullfrog.
The snake seized one of the frogs hind
legs, and the frog. to be on par with
his snakeship, caught him by the tail,
and both commenced swallowing one
another, and continued this carnivorous
operation until nothing was left of either
of them.
Two-thirds of the willow for the manu-
facture of uillowware in the United
States is imported from Europe alta cost
of $4,000. The cultivation of the will
low is contemplated by some Amencans,
they thinking that by cultivating su-
perior grades of basket willow they can
make proaD of $3.50 per acre. A manu-
facturer asserts that fully 5000 articles
are constructed from willow shoots
chairs, sofas and baskets being the most
common.
"Ah, husband, do you see this beau
bllul cdTVDB hoW uoIIOaoOiJ o"O 10 oAio
pure white stone!" "Yes. Very pref
ty." "But, William, you have no taste
for art, and you don't enjoy these things
as I do. Just notice this slender column
of immaculate marble, with the touch
ing question so beautifully carved: DO
they miss me at home?'" eyes, l see.
And here is her name on the footstone
'G. A. B. Yes; I guess they miss her
if that was her namel"
Buffalo Bill said recently to reporter
of the Philadelphia Press: " Clusters
charge was not mad or ill-timed. Gus
ter charged when, had he been sup
ported as he ought to have been, he
would have won glorious victory. He
was not supported. Reno stood mac
tive when ouly a ridge separated him
from Custer when the latter was being
butchered. Reno is to blame, and
told him SO. Benteen wanted to go and
support Custer, but Reno ranked bim
and he was powerless. The command
was not in the hands of the proper men.
They are too old, and lack the dash and
vim and vigor for such warfare" "