Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1876-02-16
After a Venus.

f1uoO OlIC VI UllO IdISo JtWolIy dllu
fancy goods stores of Boston walked,
the other day, one of those customers
that the holiday season sometimes
brings to town. He was hard-handed,
loose ointed, broad-shouldered indi-
vidual, carefully dressed in ANEW suit
of baggy, ready-made clothes, home
laundried shirt, and hat which
although perfectly new, was three sea-
sons behind the present fashion.
Sauntering up to one of the sales
men, with a very obvious attempt at
being at home among the, glittering
splendor of the salesroom, and a gener-
al air of " Not to be astonished or done
by you Boston fellers," he inquired
"Got any brunzes?''
The clerk answered in the affirma-
tive, and led the way to a bewildering
stock of bronzes, statuettes, clocks, etc.
The visitor stared at them for a mo-
ment as an interior African might
have at the first white man he had ever
seen, and then setting his hat a little
more firmly on his head, asked
(Which O. them fggers mout be the
Venus of high lowY'
The trained salesman, with a placid
countenance, quietly replied
Il do not remember any by that
title. Are you sure that was the name2"
The patron of the fine arts drew a
large yellow silk handkerchief from
his hat, and, hopping his face uneasily,
said
at mout ha' been ace high but T
think it was high low. Marian sed that
eff thou't of seven-up [ shouldn't for
get the name. The fact u.s." said the
puzzled purchaser, with sudden burst
of confidence" the fact is, Cap, / hev
just put up a new tenement down in
South Higgingboro, and Marian lowed
she'd like a bronze in the keepin' room,
suthin' like what she seed once in
cousin Sam Stifner's parlor on Beacon
street. Cousin Sam he write the name
on card, n p'raps I've got it now"
and, diving into his breast-pocket as if
he was to unsheath a two-handed sword,
he tugged out long pocket-book, from
the depths of which he plucked card
and handed it to the salesman.
"Ah |" said the latter, +" the Venus of
Milo. Yes, sir; here is a fine copy-a
reproduction by Barbidienne."
The customer surveyed il. earnestly
for a moment, and then said
eye hain't got perfect one, hev We,
Cap? This ERE one has lost both her
arms and got dents all down her back"
The patient salesman explained that
the statuette was COPY of the original
that was found in that condition.
"Shoh T. comm ented the other, and
then hesitatingly-" Don't any of them
have any more close n that? This ERE.
ones nightgown 'pers to hev kind of
slipped off on her"
Again the shopman, despite his
twitching muscles, explained to his at
tentive istner that it was an imitation
of an ancient statue. He, however,
cooking his head on the side, inquired
"Well, now, what'n you tax fur her,
jess as she stands p rapping his bony
knuckles on the bronze, as if it were a
buzz-saw.
Gone hundred and fifty dollars for
that size," said the clerk.
Wha-a-t" almost shouted the aston
ished would-be patron Of the arts; ga
hundred n fifty dollars fur bronze gal
'thout any arms, and skearse rag to
her back Venus of My Low! Venus
of Your High, I should say. A hun
dred n fifty dollars Why, that's half
the mortgage of brother Jim's farm.
Guess Marian must thought my name
was William B. Aston, instead Of John
Higgins And fixing his hat a little
frmer, he made a hasty exit from the
store, and struck a straight line for the
Eastern Railroad station.