The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1876-03-13
AN ALDERMANIC SPEECH.
Remarks of Alderman Fox-Historic and
Otherwise.

Otherwise.
In response to the vote of thanks voted by the
Board of Aldermen to Henry Fox, Esq, Chair
man, he made the following remarks:
Mr. MAYOR: 1t has occurred to me that few
ante mortem sketches of this illustrous body, and
OF its doings for the past year might not be nappro-
pirate at this time.
We do not propose to treat Of each member sep
arately, not however for the want of time but this
IS imDaterial) 1t has been customary, believe,
in legislative sketches go somewhat into DETAIL but
lie cannot be interested in knowing whether are
retired statesmen. or not whether we go to church.
or stay &C home. or whether we were originally
Straight Wings or Hunker Democrats
The present Board of Aldermen consists of seven
members and in this respect resembles all Of its
there can be but seven of them at any one time out
of all the "quaied electors of this city must,
think, not only prove the Importance of the office,
but also prove that those who framed the city charter
"builded" deeper than they knew-in limiting the
1t is of course impossible to tell from this stand
point why that number should have been selected
whether because Of the seven plaques OF Egypt or
ter reason is too weak-which as a matter of fact
would be fortnight. Surely it could not have
originated from the number Of the Pleades- for GER
tainly mo man clothed in his right mind'' could
have imagined there the slightest similarity
between the Board of Aldermen and any Of the
heavenly bodies.
But it matters little what the reason was. The
fact still remains. Suffice it then to say in the an-
guage Of the little maid) eve are seven". Having
thus disposed Of this question, the one in order
is why are we here? We reply because elected. Then
why elected? Because we received more votes than
the other fellows who stood. Why? Because they
stood better than they rum For, paradoxcal as It
may seem, candidates for office must run well when
they stand, and stand well when they run. The
first part of our official existence was spent in sriy
ing to solve the problem whether i've was more than
three But failing to get satisfactory solution, we
called to our aid those learned in the law and soc-
nfo RanAf ank
nor broken; Reed not easily 'shaken by the wind %
But alas his opinion was not conclusive to ALL Then
the courtl knight was appealed to, but very quickly
appealed from when his opinion was received. And
court.
In the meantime the city agency was closed and
since could elicit stimulating draught from
that fountain, had either to resort to illicit drinks
or confine ourselves to cold water. Now there is
something decidedly poetic about quenching ones
thirst from "the moss-eoversd bucket that hung in
in the well" and although many people dam water
water has been of infinite value to commerce. We
know that many gallant bark has foated proud
ly upon its surface
water as some imagine, and so forsooth our banks
found a watery bier and went down waterlogged-
philosophy. His Honor, the Mayor, had evidently
foreseen to what base uses we might at last,h
and in order to prepare us for the change, had in
the kindness OF his heart, previously offered us a
SWEET, but when men had been at work for
"Weeks'' they required tonic, and anything short
OF that would not go down.
But ga change came over the spirit of our dream"
The spell was broken Gas lights had been furnished
for ways that were dark" and few. if any, Of our
cropping in darkness Stil there was something more
required. balm in Giead.' A sign! And it
came. No, not 1t. For one would not suffice for the
1nsatiate archer. They came the winds some
when forests are rended, and with them came dire
confusion. Never was known "such an uproar wild"
as welcomed to life those fearful signs. Insanity be-
gan to increase. Wrong signs were everywhere;
right signs nowhere. The wrong signs were on the
right streets, and for those streets which LETT
was wrong side out. Homes were well nigh made
desolate. Ward lines were destroyed Constitu-
e enc became mixed. Indeen, our friends from
wards One and Two were somewhat like the "TwO
Finnegans." They could not tell whether there was
two OF them from one or one from two.
But finally it was made right by the alderman from
Five. He would have attended to it earlier but his
time was occupied in striving to ascertain the com
paratiye cost Of lighting the city with gas gaso
line The result Of his labors has never been made
public, but generally understood he has decided
in favor of gasoline, provided the citizens will fur
nish and light it at their own expense.
About this time it found that the city was very
much in the condition OF the young man who when
asked which he considered the worst worms or SPAR
rows, replied very innocently that he had had
sparrows The worms were making sad havoc with
the trees and importation of sparrows was deemed
advisable. Hence one of our number was duly au-
however, upon going into the market a very wide
difference between the price in New York and that
named in Biblical times, but nothing daunted he
completed the purchase, the birds came but came
late, and it is an unsettled question whether late
birds are as good to catch worms early ones The
weight of evidence anu principal authorities have al
ways been the side Of the latter. But decisions
are sometimes overruled, and it is not at all improb
able that the birds may protest against the powers
that be and have diet of worms here in Portland.
But shall not get the final decision until nature
takes another spring and turns over new leaf
Other matters have engrOssed attention from
time to time. but cannot iu the limited space aot-
ted me enumerate them here. We have had many
experiences both Instructive and interesting, which
experience in this room short time since.
1t Is exceedingly gratifying to know that rela-
tons with the council have been pleasant and harmo
were not easily settled. They ascertained what
many of could have told Them for we had found it
out by bitter experience that the council is simply
concurrent board. Some doubts were expressed as
to whether they had ever heard of Washington from
theiEevdent Discrimination to pay any respect to his
Washington had simply been President of the United
States, and never president OF the council they felt
d yon s xe OF had
reached this high round in the ladder of fame.
:. But there is limit to everything human-this is
ton to the rule they cannot escape from the statute
of limitation Our little brief year of official exist
in the municipal armament viii soon become so OBJ
liberated that it is very doubtful if any telescope
vision, however strong Its focal power, will ever be
able to discover in the realms of space any vestge of
this dignifed and respectable body-sad commentary
on human greatness. Think of it, grave and rever-
tuu SolSuOrS! FIXTURE In1nK OF It., eaCn alder
Where are your streets sidewalks and bridges,
your public grounds, your bells and clocks, your
drains and sewers your lamps and lamp posts Gone,
gone ,Othellos occupations gone For aldermen die,
aldermen are buried-aDd aldermen turn to dust.
Soon will this board be remembered with the things
that are past, and it is not at all probable that we
same official relation to each other
Ere yet that relation be severed, yet separ-
ate, ere yet the last farewell be spoken, let
press the wish that though official ties be Sc
vered, that the friendly ties that have bound TO-
gether may long continue
IN behalf OF my associates to thank you for the many
courtesies we have received at your hands Politi-
cay some of us have differed with you but we have
never allowed those differences to usarp the place Of
friendship, They have never driven from our hearts
the high esteem we have for you as gentleman and
you retire from the position you now fill, I bid you
bear with you our kindest wishes for your future
success sna "a and haRRnes sr ,ose oen
cheered us, and whose experience has so often aided
us in our labors whose orders always in order"
and whose reports have never sent forth an I'M
we gaze upon thy goodly form-Falstaffiam as it is
we can only say. may thy shadow never be less.
for the prompt and faithful manner in which he has
discharged the duties of City Messenger.
Thus have spoken for and to the living, and now
speak for the dead. 1t is meet that in this pres
ence and at this time should offer tribute Of
spect to that aged and faithful public servant whose
venerable form we miss here tonight. He was with
us when first we met, but now he has gone. He has
passed from time to eternity from earth to Heaven
May we so live that when the summons comes to join
The innumerable caravan
We go not like the quarry slave
Scourged to bis dungeon. but sustained and soothed
BY an ,unfatering trail approach our graves
Like those that draw the drapery Of their couch
Abont them and lie down to pleasant ndreams
The MUsEUM-The Museum begins this
week under favoring auspices. The manage
ment have been fortunate in securing the SER