Port Royal standard and commercial. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1874-1876, 1876-09-28
Items of Interest.

Items OF Interest.
Why is dogs tail like the heart OF
a tree2 Because it is furthest from the
bark.
Takers should speak the truth because
it is good, and not because 1t Is dis
agreeable.
There is a mill at bingham, Mass,
which was built in 1643, and is still IN
running order.
A Liverpool lawyer has been COM
PEELED to pay damages for having glveu
bad professional advice.
Why is mad bull an animal OF con-
vivial dispositioni Because he offers
horn to every one he meets.
The mother of Lieut.. Stu1gis, who
was killed in the Custer battle, has be-
come insane from grief. He was her
only son.
The entire coffee crop of the world
last year was 900, 100000 pounds, OF
which the United States imported over
800, 600, 900 pounds.
A lady says it is no worse to encircie
lady's waist with your arm in ball
room than to kiss your friends sister on
the back stairs. No worse !! Why, it ls
not half SO good.
Why don't your father take news
paper2" said gentleman to a little
urchin who m g caught in the act OF
pilfering one from his doorstep. "'Cause
he sends me to take il"
A Boston servant girl utilized the
telegraph wire that passed over the nat
roof of the house for clothes line, and
every Monday the b,ys had deeply
scientific argument as to what allied the
chemicals.
It was not many years ago when all
the skates used in the United States
came from abroad, chiefly from Ger-
many. Now, Massachusetts company
is filing orders for nickle plated skates
to be sent to Germany.
The letter carriers of New York re-
Gently presented to Postmaster James a
petition 5000 feet long, containing the
signatures of $4,000 persons, and pro-
testing against the reduction OF inc
salaries of the carriers.
A Yankee counsel, who was defending
a man on trial for wife murder, sought
for some euphonious and lnnocent
phrase with which to describe his CHI
ent's crime, and finally said: " He
winnowed her into paradise with fence
rail-"
A few days since the poor Empress
Charlotte escaped from the Chateau de
Lacken, where she is still Under care.
After finding her it was difficult to make
her return, and she was induced to do
so at length by the stratagem OF fling
ing flowers before her, as she Is very
fond of flowers. s.---------- -'. 80 ..-.-
Adam and Eve escaped two serious
annoyances of modern lovers. In the
first place, Eve had no mamma to make
iudicious inquiries as to Adams SOCIAL
position and prospects OF patrlmony,
and Adam had no "governor to see
that be did not throw himself away on
portionless girl.
John Stuart Mill once said, privately,
that there ought to be q graduation OF
electoral power, 80 that the more learned
O man the greater number of votes ne
would have. Louis Blanc replied that
if Mr.. Mill could at public meeting
convince 600 ignorant men how tney
ought to vote, he would thereby cast
600 votes.
The latest arrangement to insure the
bonoatv of car conductors is turnstlle.
The front platform OF the car IS closed
entirely no person is allowed to rlde
on the back platform, each being COM
PEELED to enter the car through the turn
stile. which stands in front OF the door,
way, and registers the number OF those
passing through.
Sentencing a criminal to be hanged a
Missouri Judge recently delivered hlm,
self of this consideratc reflection IL
guilty YOU deserve the fate which awaits
YOU: if Innocent it will be qualification
to You to feel that you were hanged
without such acrime on your conscience;
in either case you will be delivered from
a world of care"
In the Mediterranean and on the
coasts of Newfoundland the devil fish has
sometimes body length of six or seven
feet, with tentacles from twenty to forty
feet long, and two years ago one was
discovered by scme fishermen near
Bafin island, Connemara, the arms OF
whi~ h measured ten feet and the
tentacles thirty feet.
"Suppose. Belle" said poor but
honest youth to girl, "suppose that
Young man loved you deaily-very
dearl y-but was afraid to ask you to
marry him-because he was very timid
Mor % felt too~poor-or something
what would you think of such csseT
"Think ?" answered the girl, immediate,
ly. "Wby, if he was poor l should
think that he was doing Just rlght IN
keeping still about it." The question
was dropped right there.