The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1876-05-18
X
NO. 81.

all OF which agree IN stating that the crop
prospects were never so good as now.
\ Southern paper says that when the
revenue detectives boarded steamer direct
from Cuba the other day the captain invi-
ted them below to dine, and while he was
saying very lengthy grace the crew put
ashore lot Of smuggled cigars.
Hanover has family named Diller, who
are heavy weights. The combined avoir-
dupois Of the six sons is 1 ,607 pounds
Their respective weights are as follows
Cyrus, 282 pounds Isaiah, 279; Adam,
279; Simon. 267 William, 260, and Luther,
the baby, 24O.
Rye looks good.-1menia Times And
it tastes good, too.-DoHbuy Times In
hOrn.-Berkshirc Courier Whereupou
the Times remarks: We meant rye bread,
but it is evident the Courier man is wander
ing toward the stuff that biteth like a SER
peut and stingeth like book keeper.
There is man named Thurston, living
on White Oak creek, in Titus county, Tex
as, who is seven feet eight inches in height
and well proportioned The people there
feel much favored in being able to see this
giant as many times in day as they
choose, "free of charge"
Mr.. Fox, an engineer on the Southwes-
| tern Railroad, Georgia, has had several
thousand hickory sticks cut from the Ma
tional Cemetery at Andersonvlle, which
he proposes to take to Philadelphia and of
fer for sale as relics made memorable by
the recent debates in Congress, and the
lengthy discussions in the newspapers.
The Montreal Hjtness says that the grave
Of Joseph Guibord already wears look of
neglect. 1t is depressed several inches, as
though the earth had settled after the ex-
cavation had been filed in. and no head
stone or monument marks the spot. Near
by are the pieces of Nine Guibord's cross,
splintered, muddy, and well whitfield by
curiosity hunters.
A blind boy, who was taken into an elc-
vator for the first time in a Cleveland ho-
tel on Friday, set up the most terrific
screams when the cab began to rise, and
would not be pacifed until it was stopped
He explained that he supposed he had been
misled, and was being taken down into the
dissecting room Of a medical college to be
used as subject
An Indiana postmaster writes to Mayor
Stokley of Philadelphia that the Centen-
NAL city ''is to be laid in ashes in June
next and the people will wade in blood to
their knees" 1t is comforting, however,
to know that the startling news comes in
the shape Of a rumor from Allentown in
this State, and is attributable to a regular,
old fashioned Dutch ghost
a Preston man was very angry on 90
ing home the other night, to find that his
wife had lent the only bible in the house
He said it was disgrace that in this period
of Christian enlightenment family should
have only one copy of the bible. 1t seems
he wanted to decide bet as to whether it
was Paul or Cephas who said, Consistency,
thou art a jewell
There is a musical prodigy in Shenandoah.
1t is a boy only one year old. Although
unable to speak plainly, it is said he will
''sit down to the piano and play with the
ease and grace which might be expected of
a scion of the house of Won Bulow" Al
though that is rather non-committal
statement, yet it had better be taken with
q grain OF allowance.
The reports of the farmers are very en-
cOuraging concerning the crops Of the pre-
sent season. The fears that the open win
ter and the unprotected ground might prove
disastrous to fruits and cereals do not, hap
PLY, seem likely to be realized The re-
ports from the grain and fruit regions of
this State are very favorable. 1t looks as
if we might expect year Of abundance
If this shall prove the case, it will be the
gladest celebration of our Centennial.
When a NorriStowu woman asked her
husband for two dollars to buy calico
dress, he whipped a paper out of his coat
tail pocket and pointed to an editorial
which cleraly showed that female extrava-
gance was the ruination of some of our
best men, and even the country itself was
being demoralized from the same cause.
Then he gave her ten cents to buy hair
pins, lit ten-cent cigar, and left the house
and lost three dollars playing billiards
before returning home.-Herald.
In Detroit street car a mans breath
Shleiieu SO stronSly Oh WhlShey thaG 4 gen
tleman moved across the car to get out of
the circle.
"Any zing wrong ?" asked the drunkard,
as he observed the change.
Nothing except your breath smells of
whiskey enough to knock horse over"
'Spect she does-she does," was the
candid reply, "but you don't spect poor
man like me to buy college an whiskey,
too, do you ?"
An old bachelor at New Orleans had
been deferred from committing matrimony
in the following way Thinking over the
subject, and particularly of the expense of
maintaining family, he set the table in
his lonely abode with plates for himself and
imaginary wife and five children, He then
cot AnIuIl To dino aIal nftnra h, hnl.anl