davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

When Seth got home from mack,
orling he sought his Sarah Ann, and
found that she, the hcartlcss one,
had found another man, And then
most awful tight he got, and so he
went away, and bound himself to
cut live oak all down in Florida
He pined upon the live oak land, he
murmured in the shades. his AK grew
heavy in his hand, all in the Wild
wood glades. Mosquitoes bit him
everywhere, no comfort did he get,
and how terribly he'd swear when
he got bit. At last dcspairing of re-
lief, and wishing he was dead, he
went into the woods apiece and chop
ped off his own head.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

A little boy, when picking the
drumstick of a chicken, swallowed
one of the tendons which are so nu-
merous in the legs of a fowl, and was
very nearly choked, The tendon was
however, extracted with great diff
Guilty from the little fellows throat,
when he said: ooh, mamma! it
wasn't the chickablddy's fault, 1t
was because cook forgot to take of
its garters."
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

A scheme for uniting the British
channel with the Mediterranean by
n system of canals is seriously enga-
ging the merchants of France, and
has been brought before the Minis
ters of Finance and Public Works.
The course of this important high
way would be by the Seine and
Yonne, then utilizing the Burgundy
Canal, which unitcs the Yonne and
the Saonc, and following the Saone
to the Rhone, at Or near Lyons, and
thence by the Rhono to the sea. 1t
is estimated that the work could be
accomplished in six years and would
cost s13,OOO,0OO, The financial OBJ.
staclo is the only one for the great
commercial value of the work to
France is obvious.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09
Didn't Stand the Test.

Chicago Tribune: A young man
read in the Ledger a few days ago
that if you wanted to find out if the
woman you had selected for your fu-
ture spouse has a good temper, you
ought to take occasion to step on her
dress, or snap the sticks of her fan,
or in some other way annoy or dis,
compose her. "lf," said the great
authority who presided over the col
umn of advice, "if she bctrays no
signs of ill-temper she will prove a
model wife. Accordingly the young
man seized an opportunity when his
sweetheart was rugged in her most
killing array to step on her trail and
pulled out about three yards of gath
ers, with u rip like a peal of thunder,
exposing about thrce-quartors of the
frame work that makes her dress
stick out behind, But, instead of
meeting the accident with perfect
equanimity, she turned round and
jabbod her parasol into his eye, call
ed him a lunk headed leper, and
asked him why he didn't wear his
feet sideways. He expressed him
self as thankful that he didn't mar
ry the girl before finding out what
sort of a temper she had.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

Laugh at cheese diet rs you will,
Prof. Peck says that in this country
where cheese is used least, it requires
one physician to every 500 persons;
and in foreign countries, whore it is
used most, IL only requires one ply.
stefan for 10000 persons.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09
Lost Opportunity.

A Raleigh merchant was wishing
for a law to compel people to buy
more dry goods than they wanted
when in walked man who inquir-
ed for calico. Several peices were
shown him and when he found a
pattern that suited he asked;
"Can you let me have this. calico
for three cents a yard?"
"Three cents? Why you must be
crazyl"
otis for my sister, who has just ar
rived here from Australia" quietly
observed the stranger.
81 don't care if she has just arrived
from the North Pole!" answered the
merchant, "That calico, sir, is ten
cents a yard"
Seems to me that this is a glori-
Gus opportunity for you to make a
ton-strike, said the would-be custom
er. "She will make the dress up in
nobby style, wear it all the way
back to Australia, and when she
reaches home the Australians will
want to know where she got it. She
will answer "That dress came from
Raleigh, North Carolina, and only
cost three cents a yard, buttons
thrown in" Then they will club
together and send over for three hun
bred dress patterns, and you can
chuck the cash right down into your
pocket and tell 'em to go to thunder
and blazes, for the law can't touch
YOU"
"You seem to be fool sir-a fool!'
said the merchant as he began to pile
up the bolts again.
every well-very well, sir l see
that you are no hand to grasp an OPP
portunity, and 1 will look further
If you die in the poor house don't
you blame me, sir, Don't look SO
surly, sir, and good-day, sir"
1t is in the historic records of the
noble village of Sedgetown, in Lin
colnshire, that the vicar always
preached the same sermon, and they
desired change. 1t was of no use
to demonstrate with, for he inevita-
bly, replied that when they had done
all that he had told them in that
discourse he would give them anoth-
er. At last a deputation waited up
on the bishop and laid the matter
before him. They had heard the
same sermon, they said, every Sun
day morning, for ten years, and were
tired of it. His lordship owned that
little variety might fairly be insis-
ted upon after so long season of
monotony, and asked what was the
subject of this ever recurring sermon.
Subject" repeated the first parish
Toner. "Let me see. 1t is about
what is it about Higgins" "Wcll,"
said the second parishioncr, don't
mind exactly what it is about
"What was thotext?" None of them
could tell him the text, "Why,
them" said the bishop, al hardly
know how toframc my rcmomstrancc.
Suppose you go and hear it once
mOreu
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

There are u good many people in
the world who spend half their time
in thinking what they would do if
they were rich, and the other half
in coniccturing what they shall do
10 they are not,
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

Unpalatablc advice is frequently
disguised in sermon, oranccdotc,
or other confectionery. We are apt
to take such sugar.coated advice as
children do sugarcootcd pills. We
suck the sugarcoating, but we don't
gurl, the advice much,
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

If no one pauscs now and then, in
LIES "forced march," to count the
number who has wearied by the way,
of those who brushed with him the
morning dews, he feels sort of ter
ror lest he finish his journey stran-
ger and alone.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

The common mind may maintain
its place under common circumstan-
ces; the truly great alone overcome
the trials of prosperity or adversely;
showing an humble thankfulness in
one, generous sympathy, not hard
ened by its own suffering, in the 9th
er; not priding themselves on the
first, not envying in the last.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09
PAINTING! PAINTING!!

A LII the type now In this office Is entire.
n " new. We have all the late styles Of
card and poster typo, and iatter ourscli
that we can do as good work as any office
IN the State. Give US trial.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

1t was a funeral of the head Of
the family. A neighbor in the yard
while the service was going on in
the inside, was speaking of the de-
ceased, and took advantage of the
opportunity to observe in tone of
subdued sympathy; "An' had just
got in his coal and potatoes for the
winter. 1t is sad case"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

No young man really believes he
shall ever die. There is a feeling of
eternity in youth which makes us
amends for everything. Death, old
age, are words without meaning
a dream, a fiction. To be young is
to be as one of the immortals.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1876-11-09

A reverend divine, who was but a
$3.50 preacher, being called upon ae-
cidentafly for a sermon, asked afriend
what he should preach about, to
which the other replied, About five
minutes"
, 1876-10-07

ERRoR-The MteiiiJsRcer is in error
again about our local affairs. The en-
tcrtainmcn;, given by Mrs. Bell and the
dance the following evening, mentioned
in the Iatc2iigsarer as taking place at
Mr.. Cathcart's Hotel, was Mt the River
side Hotel and not ut the Exchange, We
know the MhNigepcer does not mean to be
inaccurate. I. is the fault Of its cores
pondcnt here. ship him brother fIig-
gins, whoever he, she or it be, and sub
stitute one not 50 tlll of hlunders.
, 1876-10-07
TELEGRlPHIC.

SAN FRANcIsCo. Sept, EFT is re-
ported that three prisoners escaped from
the State prison yesterday morning, and
from the fact that reward has been
offered for only one, the supposilion is
that the other two have been re-captured,
although at present it is not positively
known that more than Que has been re-
captured. One of them, name not given,
was under sentence ior seven years, and
his term would have expired in fourteen
days, therefore it was presumed that lie
would not attempt to escape. The name
of the other is given as George W. Simp-
son, who was sent over from Stanislaus
county for term of two years for grand
larceny, on the 29th OF August, 1915.
They escaped while filling mattresses out
side the prison. The third, Oswald
Frenza, who got away during the COM
motion following the escape Of the 9TH
ers. was brought to near the prison, by
1t. Gov. johnson, who covered him with
his revolver.
Woo, Spain, Sept. 2G.-The U. S.
steamer Franklin arrived here this morn
ing. Tweed was much depressed when
told that the Franklin was to. take him
TO the United States. lie hoped on ar
riving at Cuba to be got of through the
assistance and influence of his friends
and avoid being surrendered to the
American authorities. lie expressed
great disappointment at the aspect
On the arrival of the Franklin Mr. 0del,
acting minister of the United States in
the absence of Gen. Cushing, went on
board to confer with her commander re-
gartling the proposed transfer of Tweed
and Hunt to the steamer. The intention
is to remove the prisoners from their
present quarter to the steamer this even
ing During theiI confinement Tweed
and Hunt were kept in separate rooms,
closely guarded and not allowed to com
municate with each other Capt. Graly
| issued strict orders that none should be
allowed to speak to them, Mr.. Odel has
been warned that Tweed might make
away with himself rather than return to
| New York the commander Of the Frank
lin has therefore been instructed to keep
him strictly confined, and to leave him
no opportunity to jump overheard.
SAVANNAH, Sept. 23.-Interments to-
day, forty, Of which thirty are yellow fe-
yer cases.
CHARLESTON, Sept. 23.-No epidemic
here. There have been four scattering
yellow fever cases given to persons who
communicate with the quarintinc and
refugees from Savannah. The fever
shows no sign of spreading.
AUGUSTA, Sept. 23-There are 600
cases of yellow fever at Brunswick. The
people are in u most destitute condition,
and without food physicians, or nurses.
n dispatch states that it is impossible to
exaserate the frightiul condition of al
fairs, and that some of the people will
die Of starvation unless speedy aid is
rendered.
LONDON, Sept. 2S.-Twenty-siX thou
sand pounds worth Of American Eagles
were withdrawn from England yesterday
afternoon into the United States.
------------.-s -
, 1876-10-07
Local Agent tS.

l., l.. Jcwctt, Seattle. for King County,
T. o. Williams, for Kitsap County
sheriff q. w. l.. Allen, for Whutcom Co.
q. H. Botsford, for Tacoma, Pierce County.
j. B. Bingham, for New Tacoma, Pierce Co.
b. l.. Martin, for La Conner,
d. f. Gage for Siagit City,
Henry Oliver, for Centrcyillc,
Mai. Il. o. lluller, Coupcyillc, Island Co.
G.. NJ. IlallGr, Port Townsend.
Our agents are authorized to receipt for
all sums paid them for use Of the paper.
, 1876-10-07

ELDERS OF THE UNION PRESBYTERIAN
CHURCH,
Royal Haskell, Robert Barrett
, 1876-10-07
NO. 80

once out there. Soon after breakfast Mr..
L. E. Hickman informed us his ferry
boat was ready to start for Coupvillc,
which Place we wished to visit for few
hours.
As we started for Whidbcy Island we
learned that Mr.. Leancr had started for
the lake for days fishing as well as to
hunt up our friend Griffin Besides Mr..
llirman our party consisted of Mr.. White
Il logger on Camano Island, and myself.
When about enc half mile from Utsaady
we espied u bcautiul deer leisurely walk
ing along the beach close to the waters
edge, we being to the lceward, we were
not scented and tOllwed it full an hun
dred yards with our boat, when finally
it was decided TO attempt its capture
Mr.. III. left the boat, reached the edge of
the timber unObserved. Then went can-
tiously ahead until Immediately in the
rear oft, when starting suddenly, he
Scared it into the water. We then
rowed rapidly towards Mr.. II. keeping
the boat between the deer and land, and
driving it into dcrp water. AS soon as
we reached Mr. II. he got into the boat
with us, and we pulled the boat as swift
ly as we could after the deer overtaking
1t about onefourth mile from shore, when
we all three secured it lifted it into the
boat and tied it with rope, so it could
not struggle or loosen ITSELF
We took the deer alive to Coupville
returned with ito Utsalady where James
Hutchings the bar tender of the Utsalady
Hotel killed and dressed it.
Mr.. Hutchngs Is quite a character at
Utsalady. lie is popularly called Boat
swain or J0sng as it is pronouced by all
Mr.. Hickman informs US that Camano
Island is full ofdcer. That only couple
of months ago b0spa and himself started
for Browns Point some two miles distant
from Utsalady, when there they met
Robt. Freeman and Jas. Caldon coming
toward Utsalady. They saw a deer in
the water, some distance from shore after
an exciting chase the deer was secured
alive, and triumphantly brought to
town.
While J0su4, was dressing our deer, We
took supper at the Hotel where we,
found our friend Griffin, who had safely
returned. His crippled limb, made his
progress so very slow, that he deemed it
best to stop over night, camp on the
edge of the lake, have his fish in the
morning, catching 23 fine trout. We
eat OF his fish for supper. Then obtain
ed piece ot our venison, and lett Ut
salady, with many pleasant recollections
of a very beautiful day, happily put in
amid the beautiful scenery of that sec
ton of country,
Our vcnison we left with friend
where we stopped tor couple of days,
found it US tender and sweet US venison
! could be.
, We advise our friends who live at Se-
attic and It's vicinity TO try days hunt
ing and fishing at Utsalady and its Vi
cinity, and see if it can not be as pleas
antly spent there as at any place in the
Territory.
, 1876-10-07
RaieA of 12AneltLaina.

Column per year, in U. $. Coin, $4,000
l.; :" 5000
Y 4" " 5000
one square 10 lines, / insertion, .......25O
" Il" >, | month ...,.,...,.500
Legal notices Sl.OO per square first insertion;
20 Is. per square each subsequent Insertion
Special notices, special rates.
LEGAL notices charged to attorney or Off
Ger au oriZng their insertion.
Advertisements sent from II distance, and
transient notices must be accompanied by
the cash.
, 1876-10-07
The alprtl,ryn Star.
80 800

PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY AT
snohomish City, Snohomish County
WAsmlNGroN TERRITORY,
ly ELDRIDGE MORSE, Editor IL Prop'r,
, 1876-10-07

TERMS OF COURT.

District Court Third Tuesday Of March,
and Second Tuesday of November OF each year.
Probate Court,
Fourth Monday of January April, July
and October of each year.
, 1876-10-07

Ladies', please be sweet, but don't be
too formal. BE roses, but don't be pgim
roses:
, 1876-10-07

Terms Of Subscription.
$500 per annum in U. 5, Coin; $3.50 per an
num in Currency. INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE.
, 1876-10-07

The Mayor If Oh City, Pa gets a sal
ary of 81 year. Money does not make
that Mayor s..
, 1876-10-07

The quality we call moral courage is
necessary 10 finished success.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-02-03
THE EMQUIRKR.
to find limb upon which the unfortunat
Whig might be hanged. The party were i

to find limb upon which the unfortunate
Whig might be hanged. The party were in
earnest. So soon as the woods were reached
they commenced the search for suitable
limb. One man, with loaded musket, was
left in charge of the prisoner, whilst the others
scattered about some few steps from him, in
search for limb.
Whilst the party was hunting for gal
lows, the puppy who stood guard over the
prisoner, picked up piece Of dry COW ma
nure that lay near by, and placing it to the
nose of Kilpatric, asked him if be did not
want to smell old Ireland. This was too
great an insult for Robert Kilpatric to bear
although being led to the gallows He drew
back his heavy arm, and with one blow laid
the vile rascal senseless upon the ground and
again took to the woods. The tories shot at
him, but he escaped untouched.
The tories never put their hands upon Rob
ert Kilpatric again. He lived to see his
country free and the name of the tories who
attempted to hang him covered with lasting
disgrace Three times he had the rope around
his neck to be hanged; yet he died in his own
bed in 1910, We think, at the advanced age OF
one hundred and fifteen years. When the
war of 1872 broke out he sent two of his sons
to help in driving the British from the coun'
try. A plain slab marks his last resting
place, in Hopewell grave yard, in Chester
county, S. c.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-02-03

The DocroR's QUEsr1oNs.-Rev. Doctor
Richie, of Edinburgh, though very clever
man, has met with bis match. When exam.
lining student as to the classes be had atten'
ded, he said, "And you attended the class for
mathematics ?"
Eyes"
"How many sides has circle?"
"Two," said the student.
"What laugh in the class the students
answer produced, when he said, can inside
and an outside"
But this was nothing compared with what
followed The doctor having said to this
student, "And you attended the moral phil
osophy class also? ?"
Eyes"
swell you would hear lectures on various
subjects. Did you ever hear one on cause
and effect p
EYES,"
"Does an effect ever 60 before cause?"
EYES,"
"Give me an instance"
"a man wheeling a barrow"
The doctor then sat down, and proposed no
more questions
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-02-03
Aumuruus 2epattment.

YANKEE TRADING.-A certain farmer, who
in the course of year purchased hundred
dollars worth of goods, (and always paid for
them) called at the store of a village merchant,
his regular place of dealing, with two dozen
brooms, which he offered for sale. The mer-
chant (who, by the way, is fond Of good
bargain) examined his stock, and said:
"Well, Cyrus, will give you shilling a
piece for these brooms."
Cyrus appeared astonished at the offer, and
quickly replied:
"Oh! no, John, I can't begin to take that
for em no how but I'll let you have 'em for
twenty cents piece, and not cent less.''
"Cyrus, you are crazy" replied John.
"Why, see here" showing him fine lot OF
hrooms, ''is an article great deal better than
yours" (which was not true,) "that | am re.
(Which was not true by seven and half cents. }
II don't care for that" answered Cyrus ;
"your brooms are cheap enough, but you can t
have mine for less than twenty cents, no how
and pretending to be more than half angry,
shouldered his brooms and started for the door.
The merchant, getting little nervous over
the probable loss of good customer, and
fearing he might 60 to some other store and
never return, said:
"See here, Cyrus, hold on while. If l
give you twenty cents for your brooms, | sup.
pose you will not object to take the price Of
them in goods !"
"No, don't care if I do,' replied Cyrus.
"Well, then,'' said the merchant, "as you
are an old customer, will allow you twenty
cents apiece for this lot. Let me see-twenty
times twenty-four make just four hundred
and eighty-yes, four dollars and eighty cents.
What kind of goods will you have, Cyrus ?"
"Well, now, John, I reckon it don't make
any difference to you what kind of goods l
take, does it?'
"Oh no, not at all-not at all p said the
merchant.
"Well, then, as it don't make any difference
to you, III take the amount in them brooms
of yourn, at twelve and half cents piece
Let me see-four dollars and eighty cents will
get thirty.eight brooms, and five cents over.
It don't make much difference, John, about
the FIVE cents, but as you are right clever
feller, I believe I will take the change in ter
backer."
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-02-03

sS "Can take one O. them yer splinters? p
inquired frontiersman, pointing to the box
of wooden toothpicks in Chicago restau.
rant, the other day. certainly, sill" replied
the polite cashier. The man took one, and
backing off few steps, using it the while in
dustriously, soon returned, and carefully de-
posting it from whence it came, remarked
to the amazed cashier, complacently: 81
don't see how yer can ford ter keep them
things. 1 notice so many folks take em of
an never bring EN- back" And as he march
ed out of doors with the expression of a man
conscious of having performed an honest act,
the cashier emptied the toothpick box under
the counter, with disgust marked on his every
feature
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-02-03
[Original
MANS CHIEF END.

1t must be evident that God had some pur-
pose in view in bringing each member of the
human family into existence. 10 suppose
that he had no object in view in our creation,
is to degrade the character of the creator and
ruler of the universe by supposing that he acts
without design. Nothing is useless. Every
thing, even the smallest and most insignificant
of the works of creation, have a mission to
perform. Like the small wheels in some
complicated machinery, or like the little cogs
in the little wheels, the smallest thing in the
universe is, in its place, Important To say
that God made anything in vain, or for no
purpose, is to say that God sometimes acts
foolishly. This would be blasphemous.
The greater always includes the less. If
God had some purpose in bringing into exist
ence the little things Of creation, surely he
had some purpose in view when he made man.
He was created in the image of his maker and
made lord of the lower world. His place in
the scale of existence was but little lower
than the angels of heaven. Surely, the end
for which man was made, was not that, by
prostituting his mental faculties and moral
endowments, he might ultimately degrade
himself beneath the beasts of the field. For
no such vile purposes was man created. One
of the objects which God had in view was to
show his power, wisdom and goodness, and
thus shed abroad throughout creations vast
domain, his declarative honor and glory.
When we contemplate man in his material or
ganization, in his mental endowments and his
moral constitution, the power, wisdom and
goodness of God are seen more clearly, and
more fully, than when we contemplate sprig
of grass.
Another object that God had in view in the
creation of man, was that man might publish
and declare the praises of God in way that
the other creatures of this world cannot Ev-
erything praises God, but in its own way.
The tribute of praise which man is capable
Of rendering to his maker, is far superior
in kind to that rendered by any other
creature of this earth. The object for which
man was made was to glorify God and thus
to be happy for ever and ever.