The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1876-02-17
The Candidate for ONCE,

"Porte Cfayon' portrays, in ,Harper's
Magazine, the experiences of man who
had lust received 4 nomination for an
elective office: -
When I walked down street next day
the perception Of my new relations with
the public surprised me like the shock Of
geld bath. Instead of the cold and
somewhat shy Difference. habitually &C.
corded to independent position and re-
served manners, was everywhere &C.
costed with an easy and aggressive famil-
iaritY. My right hand was crushed with
the cordially Of fellows whose names
were unknown to me, and my ribs ached
with the friendly pokes of people whose
former acquaintance had never transcend
ed distant nod. Tom introduced me to
his neighbor Dick, and Dick presented
his tend Harry, and Harry called up
my: fellow eftizeps Ragtag and Bobtail,
aud everybody waatedSe know my opin-
ions on all imaginable subjects
railroads, local option, free schools,
Cuba, the next Presidency, and what not,
was seriously embarrassed at finding
myself for the first time face to face with
a constituency, but was humanely re-
lieved by Bully M Cue, who stepped up
and whispered in my ear, contidentially:
You can answer all them questions most
satisfactory in one word-treatr'
"a friend in need is a friend indeed"
and by authority my committee man led
the constituency into the next grocery.
Then was followed by bevy of little
girls collecting for the Mite Society, who
pertly demanded dollar from the candi-
date. Rejecting that little girls have
fathers who have votes, l called up a
sweet blushing maiden who was mLdestly
hanging back, and gave her the dollar
with u pat on the head and compliment
added. This was observed, and at the
next corner I was boned by a maiden
aunt of one OF the little girls for contri
button to the heather. Certainly. pro-
fOundly pity the heather, especially those
whose lot is cast in our borders.
/ escaped in friendly store; but there
the proprietor spread his stock of silks on
the counter, insisting l should. select q
drsss for madam to wear at the Capital
next winter. Only sixty-fve dollars the
pattern. I declined; hadn't the money.
"Very proud to have your name on our
books" said he, bundling up the dress
and sending it off by boy without my
daring to object.
was next obliged to buy a rawboned,
spawned, wind broken horse to election
ecr on, because q warm friend and voter
insisted on it. A burly fellow claimed
two dollars Of me for load of worm
eaten pine wood he had thrown off at my
door without saying By your leave"
and although he knew peculiarly de-
spised that kind Of fuel.
fastening homeward, l was waylaid by
= disagreeable, peak-nosed elder, who had
seeded from the Methodist Society, and
was trying to get up an opposition meet
ing-house to divide our poor little COM
munity. Knowing how contemn him
and his enterprise, he now asserts his ad-
vantage, and thrusts his greasy subscrip-
tion-paper under my nose, with the re-
mark !" that candidates. for public favors
is expected to be liberal" -,a..s..
fork over twenty dollars with groan.
Yesterday 1 was impressed with the he;
lief that the public, = through its commit
tee,'' was soliciting favor froH me; to-
day the boot seems to be on the other leg.
z.s,. 81. t4