The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1876-01-20
TROUBLE IN THE FAMILY.
Alas for hopes so sweet and dear,
fhnxr r-or,;ol,

1oS, tIlaG WHAT we WAnG TO KNOW.
Mr.. Burlycook is good man, the head
of prosperous little family, well-to do
farmer, and good citizen. Burlycook
is the proprietor of snug little farm in
one of the adjoining towns, a man who
takes great comfort in looking over the
fruits of honest toll, but withal is not of
that specie of the horny-fsted granger
whose palms are addicted to the habits
of eternal chnching with never show
for expanding into a liberal opening in
favor of chick, child, friend or neighbor.
Not he. He was never known to pump
water into dressed turkeys for city mar
ket, allow it to freeze, and then offer the
same at 1S cents a pound. He never
sits sand into No. l wheat, nor vends
eggs ennanating from epizootic hens. In
short our friend Burlycook is fair spe-
cimen of Lature's noblemen, and it is
for this reason alone we are called upon
to record a sad mishap in his family,
which came within an iota of casting a
pail of gloom over the whole community.
Burlycook came to town with farm pro-
duce last week, and have disposed Of
the same to good advantage, began to
make purchases for house and home,
buying here and there, until ct last when
all needy comforts were acquired, Burly-
cook made preparations for the home
ward journey. In one of our stores he
was struck with the peculiar beauty and
practical arrangements of a kitchen
stove, and while twirling his thumbs
and instituting comparisons between
this and miserable concern at home
worrying fond wife's temper into tan
trums, the idea occurred to him to dis
ENDOWED his wallet and make home ra-
diant with this important acquisition.
Being liberal fellow, as aforesaid,
bargain was struck in less time than
Lutte Taylor could have said teeter ten
der thimble-top, and the new stove with
its numerous appendages and shining
pipe was safely deposited in the wagon
box. In getting things trim for the
home-run, Burlycook began to tumble
about with a number of parcels, bundles
and packages, depositing them here and
there, until he picked up one containing
something for his own special use, which,
it occurred to him, must be kept dry or
become worthless Happy thought He
IF Ia 49,
placed his treasure inside the stove. ALI
being in shape he gathered up his reins,
struck up the tune of s'sweet home" and
departed with heart beating time to
the music of his soul. Late in the after
noon he drew up in front of his farm
house, from which its inmates turned
out to greet him with smiles of welcome.
The wagon-box and its treasures were
soon objects of great interest and out
bursts of joyous surprise. There was a
little for each and something nice for
all in that pandora, but the stove was
the grand centre of attraction after all,
and Mr.. B. called for assistance to help
unload and put the article in it's future
sphere of usefulness. In opening one
of the doors B. was surprised to see that
his own little package had come to piec-
es and that its contents were scattered
throughout the interior of the stove,
which said discovery somewhat annoyed
him. Calling for a whispbroom he
hot 1,a fho,,
proceeded to series of manipulatiors
that were followed with deep interest by
all members of that happy little fami-
ly circle. The stove was first laid
on one side, then on the other. It was
set up on end and then keeled over on its
front. Finally it was laid upside down
it's doors opened and banged, tie dam
pers opened and closed and every move
able dingus appertaining to its regula-
ton, punched and yanked until not a
grain of Mr.. BIS package remained to
these operations Burlycook muttered
something about stdummed FOOLS and
''rotten paper, but this had no especial
bearing on anyone in his immediate vi
cinity, and when the stove was finally
up in its position in the kitchen, and the
pipes were all properly jointed and adj
hand across his brow, sweep away the
sultry clouds that for moment had OBJ
scured the genial sunlight of his good
nature. Meanwhile the shadows of twi-
light had deepened into night, fire
had been built in the new stove, the ket-
tie purred and hummed its melodies of
home comforts, and the family sat in a
huddle around the newcomer trying its
various disguses and commenting en-
Enthusiastically upon its manifold advan-
tages. just at this moment Mrs, B,
stepped out from the pantry with pan
of biscuit in her hand. One of the chill
dren opend the oven to receive its first
trial when 10 fearful crash blazed ter
ror and dismay into home but so re-
Gently happy and content. There was
considerable confusion Just then and q
whole family PROSTATE and sprawling all
over that kitchen. Mrs. B. was the first
to recover from the shock. With haste
equal to meditation and double the speed
of thoughts of love she dropped her pan
of biscuit and began to pick up children
and make inquiries as to their moral and
physical condition with astonishing vol
lubility. Satisfied that all were safe
and no one hurt, her next effort oulmi-
mated in bucket of water over what