The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1876-11-24
FACTS AND FANCIES.

A CYNICAL lady, rather inclined to
tiirt, says most men are like cold, very
easily caught, but very hard toget rid of.
A PRETTY reply Of a French mother:
(Which of your children do you love
most?" "AlwayS the one that is absent"
SOME boarding schools fit young ladies
for keeping bcardgrs after they marry
and have husband 70 support.
A DAUGHTER Of Mary Fairfax Som
merfeld, the mathematician, is about TO
erect a monument TO her mother in
| Naples.
MAJOR PAULINE CUsHMAN, who was
a spy in the war and afterwards an ac-
tres-, has opened a hotel at san Gabriel,
/ California.
To getup a handkerchief hirtation-
| rule first, get two handerchiels and two
fools. The other five rules are unneces-
! sary.
An old Scotch woman recommended
preacher who arrived at the kirk wet
through go get at once into the pulpit
"Ye'll be dry enough there"
CON, mamma, that's Capt. Jones'
! knocked | kR0,g he has come to ask me
to be his wife !"
well, my dear, you mustaccept him"
"But thought you hated him 50 !"
"Hate him | d0--sO much that ]
mean to be his mother-in-lawW
CERTAINLY never said anything
against woman's rights, and they always
seemed TO me to be akiud of rights, that,
if | might judge of my practical ex-
perience, are very apt 20 take care Of
themselves. | say this as a married man
of long standing. Hoor.
CHILDREN must have love inside the
house and fresh air, and good play
and some good cOmPanonship outside
otherwise young life runs the greatest
danger in the world of Hithering or
growing stunted, or at best promaturcly
old and turned inward on itself.
\ MILWAUKEE paper reports zone hun
dred and twenty three deaths from small
pox, of which thirty-thrcc were fatal"
The disease must have assumed an eE
tremely violent form if this statement is
Trustworthy. When, IN the course Of an
epidemic, death becomes fatal, the com.
munity afflicted should lose no time in
electing a new board OF health.
THEY were two peanut venders, and
when they met they set their baskets
down and hooked hands silently. Then
one said. COWS the trade, Bill, wild
yer now ?' "Hawful," the dried-up old
man replied. "Yer see the eastern
question and that pivotal business in
New York is crushing us down. / tells
YOU fears the markets going up, and
so laid in stock for the winter. I've
invested forty cents ~ speckerlatiOn,
and if we don't have war in Turkey I'm
a ruined man."
IT * q preat thing to be able to see n
point Here is happy instance OF abili-
ty in that line. A countryman, waRder-
ing with his wife through the art gal
leries of the Philadelphia exhibition,
stood before Rivierc's picture Of Circe
and the companions Of Ulysses. He
gazed earnestly at the painting, wondered
what was meant by the handsome young
woman playing on her Tyre. while a herd
of swine walowed and tumbIed about at
her feet He then looked up the pic
turo in his catalogue and pondcred over
the tide, "The companions of Ulysses"
Said he: "Well, if that ism t the hardest
slap old Grants got yet"
THE Scientific American prints the
following comiortiug intelligence for
persons who are dailyannoycd by tobacco
fiends "The effects OF tobacco smoking
are discoloring of the teeth by carbon,
excitement OF the sallvary glands by the
ammonia, headache and lassitude from
the carbonic acid, disease OF the heart
from the carbonic oxide, nausea from the
bitter extract, and a tainting of the
breath by thee volatile empyreumatic
substance The system may become used
to these thing, yet is made liable to
consumption, nervous exhaustion, par
alvsis, and other ailments
A NORTH CAROHTA paper vouches
for this instance in which prcpossessing
widow seems to have got the worst Of IL:
at is a wonder 10 me, captain W,
you do not get married. "Well, maam,
! never think of it, for tho woman I'd
have might not have me, and then, you
know. rice U7n0" "NCs, but what kind
of a lady would suit you |' and the
widow looked her sweetest. 1t was right
here the captains wonderful nerve never
forsooB him, but setting his eyes steadily
at the widow, he hardened his heart
and replied: Madam, she must be
years old to a second, and
worth 5000, 900" "Itis getting 50 chilly
out here must 90 for my shawl" said
the widow, and She lookcd frigid zones at
the captain as she brushed him by with
a toss Of her head.