The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1876-07-21
mi isc liza O O III s.
Mr., Diakie's Revenge,
a DISASTROUS DINNER.

Naturally, my dear, II body meets with
many singular people in the course OF
keeping hoardcrs. | think the qucerest
folks that ever were, have come and board
ed with me since Mr.. johnson left me with
three little children, to earn my living by
the most ungratclul task that ever was put
upon woman's shoulders for there arc
people that never think y0u can 10 enough
for en-, and people that haven't any con
sidcration for yonr feelings, and ifa tur-
key happens 60 be tough, ask if it was cycl
known for certain what became ofthc pail
that went into Noahs ark, and the like Of
that, you know and there are people that
have witnesses, and people that want raw
meat or scorched cinders, and people that
can't bear any thing fried, and people that
won't touch pork, and people that take
airs and don't pay, and people that are SC
far from what they pretend to he that you
have To mention to them that their rooms
are wanted, and all sorts of people who dc
all sorts of queer things
One Of the queerest things | ever knew
to be done by any boardcr was done,
must say, by Mr.. Dinkie:
He came to board with me about five
years ago, just at Christmas time. He was
a bachelor, about so years old, | should
judge, and his face was smooth shaved
and he wore a mahogany colored wig and
he was rather particular in his dress. He'd
just met with disappointment-no in
love, mind you, but in money.
lie had made himself slave to ricl
old uncle for twenty years, expecting to be
his heir; put up with all sorts of treat
ment been hutfed and scolded and sneer
ed at morning, noon and night; never said
word; but just went on grinning and
rubbing his hands speaking about his
"dcar uncle" until the old man died, wher
he left him only n hundred year for hi.
life. After that he came to board will
me.
There was boarding with me at the same
time maiden lady named Swiffles. She
was about as Old as Mr.. Dinkie, and sh,
was very rich. She wore diamonds in hel
ears so big and SO shiny that l wondered
the thieves let her come home alive will
'em on. And she had the same kind o
diamonds on her fingers. She had three
pets, dog with curly wool, and kittcl
| all white except black nose, and greer
and red parrot. Day times she had then
in the room, but she hired an extra room
for them, and they slept in that, and i
was comical to see them, Poll in her cage
and the dog and kitten in a sort of baske
cradle, with refreshments set 'em in cas-
they should be hungry in the night.
Every body isn't so careful of children
She had white, quilted covers for the tw,
animals. 1t was peculiar, and she was cu
rious in good many things.
She wasn't very handsome, but she wa
Of u very good family and though sh
wanted extras, she paid for 'em. lemem
Der asking her once why she hadn't MARI
ed, and she said she always felt that tn
male sex was beneath her, and that sh
couldn't promise to obey any of 'em. Sh
asked me if didn't feel to despise Zen
myself; and said some Of 'em | did, nm,
some again didn't
She had writtcna lecture l think, TO
the purpose of putting them down, ant
she was going to deliver it in my parlo
one night; only l says to her, says
"Miss Swiflles," says l, SIM only poo
widow, depending on my boarders for
living, and as most of 'em are of the NAL
sex it might give 'em oilense to tell em al
them dreadful things about themselves
and how you despised 'em so, Miss Swil
ilcs." So she gave up the idea, aud wa
thankful.
Well, after Mr.. Dinkie came, notice,
Miss swilllcs and he used to argue togcth
or good deal. Sometimes, too, he use'
to seo~her to church and to lectures. ha,
my eyes about me, and noticed she use,
to dress herself up very smart indeed afte
he came