Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1876-05-26
SENSE AND NONSENSE.

HORRIBLE timesl There's hardlya fam.
lily in the land but kneads bread.
IL stitch in time saves nine, how
many does a stitch in the side saver
THE 81. Louis Times is Of the opinion
that any fool is fit for the position Of Con-
sui
WHEN a bee, wasp or hornet stings, it
Is generally at the expense of his life
Thus is humanity avenged.
A YOUNG Philadelphian, threatened with
q breach. .of-promise suit, says: "Sue
away Contracts made on Sunday amt
legal"
THE Chicago baseball players says the
sage Of the New York Commercial ADDER
ttser rarely come to bad ends, they have
such good beginnings.
SIR JOHN LUBBOCK says bees are moi
sympathetic. II may be stated, according
ly, that the warmth OF their receptions
doesn't come from the heart.
SUCH American girls as have married
Cinnamon pronounce them excellent hus-
bands. John" does all the work while
his wife reads all the moves.
IT may be that Piper is insane, and the
matter ought to be settled; but the only
way to determine it conclusively is by a
post DsoTtem examination.-Oi OincSnnatt
Times.
ANNA DICKINSON cleared $700 by her
opening night, and if she is failure she
has money enor gh to buy spring hat
and new dress, and 60 home looking
real sweet ~
GONE good turn deserves another" as
his mother said to the boy who turned q
somersaut in the front parlor, when she
grabbed him, bent him over her knee, and
energetlcally piled her slipper TO him.
ACCORDING to a Glasgow savant it takes
1,SO0 years for a seam of coal one foot
thick to form. When your wife falls over
the coal scuttle just mention this fact as
you rub oil on her nose.
SEBoCYNIsM is a form of worship against
which the press is inveighing some Just
now. In other words, the women who
make fetiches of their poodles, are scolded
right soundly for their misplaced atfec-
tions.-ChtcGgo EUening Journal.
AN old lady, over a hundred years old,
came into Troy the other day, and skipped
playfully around through the milliner
shops, examining the new styles in spring
bonnets. How rapidly these old folks are
getting young, this centennial year
COUNTERFEIT gold coin, made of plati-
mum plated heavily with genuine gold,
has of late been circulated in California.
1t is exceedingly deceptive, being of the
right weight, color and feeling. The
platinum is worth half as much as gold,
making these counterfeits costly of pro-
duction
"I Is 1T becoming to ?" asked she, as
she paraded in the costume of 100 years
ago before the man who is not her lord
and master, but is her husband. ''Yes,
my dear, . said he meekly. Don't you
wish could dress this way all the time r'
she asked. No, my DEAR" he answered,
but | wish you had lived when that was
the style"
He isn't six years old, and he said /:
"Please sister Sarah, can't have anoth-
er piece of that nice custard pie you
made?" Why, deary, you are too full
for utterance now; look at that lusc ious
dumpling on your plate not half eaten. 4"
"Oh, well, sister, | know the dumpling
side Of my stomach is full, but the custard
pie side feels rather empty yet"
A LooKER-oN in Paris asks "When will
Americans learn to econosnige -natarial "
and adds: 1.-THE yearly sum of five thou
sand francs is paid by one man here for
the privilege of laying clean, fresh straw
over the floor of butter market, which,
when removed, yields back the butter
which is fingered and chewed and tasted
and rejected through the day. The straw
is thrown into hot water, and the butter
rising to the top is purified and sold to
pastry cooks. AS it is reasonable to sup
pose that the poorest butter is not swal-
lowed by the tasters 1T puts one quite out
Of conceit of pie-crust.
! THE work of sending wood through the
fifteen mile tlume of Mackey 81 Fair isn't
fun by any means The snow is still
from fifteen to thirty feet deep in the high
Sierras where the men are now at work
In order to supply the mills of the Pacific
Mill and Mining Company, Mr.. Hereford
has been obliged to tunnel over four miles
through the snow, the tunnel being used
as roadway for the wood to be fioated
down the tlume. AT every 200 yards of
| this immense stretch, cross-cut, so to
speak, has been made, for the purpose of
throwing up the snow cut away in the
tunneling.- Virginia City (NeU,) Chroat-
Gle May l.
IT is no exaggeration to say that health
is large ingredient in what the world
calls. talent. A man without it may be a
| giant in intellect, but his deeds will be
| the deeds of dwarf. On the contrary,
lCl llLu udNc d a SOOu
| digestion, the bulk, thews and sinews of a
man, and he will set failure at defiance.
A man has good reason to think himself
well off in the lottery of life if he draws
| the prize of healthy stomach without a
mind, rather than the prize of fine in
tellect with a crazy stomach. But of the
two, weak mind in herculean frame is
better than giant mind with crazy con-
stitution. A pound of energy with an
ounce of talent will achieve greater re-
suits than pound of talent with an ounce
of energy. y.-ErcEdnge. e
The ST. Louis Republican mentions some
of the troubles that will follow the new
money; When man walks much the
side of his legs will be chafed raw. When
| less than dollar is to go by mail it will
have ts be converted first into postage
stamps. When you run for street car
money will fly out of your pokcets at
every jump. When you tell your wife
! that you have no money she will say that
you lie, for she heard it jingle. twill be
| difficult to pay man quarter by mistake
for half. When you are ina hurry the
| storekeeper will have to weigh the coin in
his hand and sound it twenty five times on
| the counter before he can determine
whether it is good. The baby will swal-
! low dime day. A boy with quarter
will lose it in crack in two minutes, from
which no amount of coaXing with forks
and chips can recoverit. Sleepy men will
put buttons and lozenges into contribution
boxes as OF yore."