Northern tribune. [volume] (Cheboygan, Mich.) 1875-1885, 1876-01-01
Miscellaneous Matters.

! miscellaneous Matters.
/ "A brave man meets misery with a
smile" And many a man brings misery
by smiling" too often.
Smith is the name of the fellow who is
now affianced. by the public press, to
Ms Clara Louise Kellogg. s
Frank Leslie now owns house once
owned by w. III. Tweed. Will, that
house never get out of the hands of the
pirates iassa si e.
"A stocking darner. has been invented,
which will enable woman to darn her
stockings more and say Darn her stock
There is London burglar who can al
ways prove that he is innocent His
name is 7. NJ. Innocent, and sI. M limo
cent is always his plea, though it is true
in-no-sense save that one. 20
| BabcOck was arrested On the, st. Louis
Indictment by his own father-in-law. It
might have been wors,. 1t mig have
been his mother-in-law, and then what
would have become of him?
A Milwaukee woman is applying for a
divorce because her husband always
spreads his ears over her when he is
asleep, instead CT hanging them over the
headboard as other Milwaukeans do.
An eastern paper says. sDon't fail to
read Prof. Proctors illntrated lecture. on
our inside to-day" We thought Prof.
Proctor lectured on astronomy; but we
have 10 doubt a lecture on the ..insides'
of New York editor would be very in
teresting, particularly an ILLUSTRATED lee
ture."
Illustrating the effects of the late terri
BILE rains in England, the London Fun
prints the following:
Stranger-"Can you tell me where MIR,
Mered's farm is?''
| Rustic-'.Yes sir, can. Dye see that
there bo-at?'
Stranger-''Yes.
Rustic-"Well, sir, it's as nigh as can
be underneath that there boat
/ Mr.. COlfax tells good story of Presi-
dent Lincoln: that when he was attacked
with smallpox, he said to his attendants.
''Send up all the office seekers. and tell
them Pve got something can give each
OF them 9
One more state heard from Kentucky
trots out a woman 10 yeare of age and
stiIlshourishing likcsa green bay tree.
The only pun of any merit that was
ever got off by the present administers
ton was when Grant sad .sSchenck is a
friend of miner ri.o afs3
Architects are wanted in Missouri The
penitentiary will have to be enlarged.
! What vast army of old liars are en-
rolling their names as centennarians this
year.
Weston has gone to Europe in very
unprofessional manner. He should have
walked. -, -
If the Keely motor can be used to run
a BsbcOck extinguisher. it ought to be
encouraged to come out at once.
There are great many Morenci house
holds, who cannot say their lines have
been cast in pleasant places. Clothes
line thieves are too numerous.
Fruit men, who never lie only in cases
Of emergency, say that the peach crop of
next year will'be enormous if. 80
/ Snow is ten feet deep in Skowhegan,
Maine, and they are selling whisky by
the plug. ass,.,s ~
( The schooner Pamlico, which recently
/ went ashore at Little Traverse Bay, has
been towed into Little Traverse harbOr,
where she will winter. A portion of her
cargo of wheat was sold for mere moth
ling. There are still 1900 bushels of wet
wheat in her hold. -
1 Alot Of confectionery and other goods
] intended for distribution on Christmas
eve. but coming too late, We're stored for
New Years, but stolen from the Presby-
terian Church at Spring Lake on Christ
mas night. aslS} ~
i The Rattle Creek hoe factory is doing
an immense business. Orders in a larger
number than ever before have come in
Il this season, and they have, thus far, cut
I, up over seven tons of steel. They EN-.
ploy thirty-five hands and turn out twea-
ty-tive dozen hoes daily.