Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1876-05-05
How 20 no TO sleep.
Mn. DurrERw1cK's EXPERIMENT.

mh bUIIEhNlNh >
Mr.. Butterwick of Boxborough had fit
of sleeplessness one night lately, and after
vainly trying to lose bimselfln slumber, he
happened to remember that he once read
in an almanac that man could put him
self. to sleep by imagining that he saw
flock of sheep jumping over fence, and
by counting them when they Jumped. He
determined TO try the experiment, and clos
ing his eyes he fancied the sheep jumping
and began TO count. lie had reached bis
14Oth sheep, and was beginning to doze off,
when Mrs. Butterwick suddenly said:
"Josephp'
40 whatv'
~ believe that yellow hen of ours wants
to SET"
80, don't bother Inc with such nonsense
as that nowl Do keep quiet and go to
Sleep"
Then Butterwick started bis sheep again,
aud commenced to count. He got up 10
100, and was feeling as If he would drop off
at any moment when, just as the 12lst
sheep was about to take that fence, one OF
the twins began to cry.
"Hang that childr be shouted at Mrs.
Butterwick; "why don't you tend TO IL
and put it 10 sleep9 Hush up, you little
imp, or I'll spank your
When Mrs. Buiterwick had quieted it,
Butlerwick, although a little nervous aud
excited, concluded to try it again. Turn
ing on the imaginary mutton he began.
Only "a sheep had slid over the fence when
Butterwick's mother-in-law knocked at
the door and asked If he was awake. When
she learned that he was she said she be-
lieved he had forgotten TO close the back
shutters, and she thought she heard burg
lars in the yard.
Then Butterwick arose in wrath and
went down TO see aboutit. He aseertained
that the shutters were closed as usual, and
as he returned to bed he resolved that Mrs.
Butterwick's IS mother would leave the house
for good in the morning, or he would.
However, he thought he might as well give
the almanac plan another trial, and setting
the sheep in motion he began TO count.
This time he reached 240, and would prob
ably have got TO sleep before the Booth
sheep jumped had not Mix's new dog in
the next yard become suddenly homesick
and began 10 express his feelings in a Sc
.ries o f prolonged and exasperating howls.
Butterwick was indignant. Neglecting
the sheep be loaped from bed and began to
lombard Mixs new dog with boots, soap.
cups, and every loose object he could lay
his hands on. He hit the animal at last
with plaster bust OF Daniel Webster, and
induced tie dog to retreat 10 the stable and
think about home in silence.
1t seemed almost ridiculous to resume
those sheep again, but he determined 10
give the almanac man one more chance,
and SO as they began to jump tho fence he
began to count, and after seeing the SD
sheep safely over, he was gliding gently
into the land of dreams when Mrs. Butter
wick rolled out of bed and fell on the floor
with such violence that she walked the
twins and started them crying, while But
terwick's mother-in-law came down stairs,
! four steps at time, 10 ask if they felt that
earthquake.
The situation was too awful for words.
Butterwick regarded it for moment with
speechless indignation, and then seizing a
| pillow he went over 10 the sofa in the back
sitting-roonl and lay down on the lounge.
He fell asleep in ten minutes without the
assis lance of the almanac, but he dreamed
all night that he was being butted around
tho equator by Cotswold ram, and he
woke in the morning with terrible head
ache and conviction that sheep are good
enough for wool and chops, but not worth
a cent as a narcotic Philadelphia Bulletin.