The Vancouver independent. (Vancouver, W.T. [Wash.]) 1875-1910, 1876-10-07
Wanted, n Farm.

with a weed on his hat, who said he had
cash to pay for farm, provided he
could get one to suit The agent smiled
him to seat, and brought out his reg
lister of descriptions. He had several
farms registered on his books. and he
had no doubt that he could suit the
would-be purchaser. The stranger re-
marked
"What 1 want is farm of about
three hundred acres"
II have it, replied the dealer.
II would like about six large hills
on it,"
"Here she is-here's farm with ex-
actly six hills on it."
"And I'd like a lake very near the
center"
Here you are. Here's farm with
lake exactly in the center"
"And 1 want big natural cavern in
one of the hills"
"Here yon are. There's q cave on
this farm that can't be beat"
Tho stranger drew n long breath, and
went on:
II want farm with three hundred
acres, but one hundred acres must be
marsh land"
Here she is was the ready reply.
"Just three hundred acres on the farm,
and lust one hundred acres of it marsh
land"
II must have a waterfall twenty-six
feet high on the farm" continued the
stranger.
Here you are. This farm has natu-
raj waterfall of twenty-five feet and
eleven inches. don't suppose an inch
more or less on waterfall amounts to
much"
"Well, no, but I want windmill on
one of the hills"
THAT was put up last year." was the
calm reply.
1t was some time before the stranger
thought of anything else, but he finally
said
''There must be Baptist church
right across the road from the house.
'One built there last Summer, sir"
at must be brick church"
$50 it is"
"Has it an Organ?"
1T has"
"Then I can't buy farm of you."
said the stranger, rising to go. IF
there is anything hate. it is a church
organ, and you can sec for yourself that
1 would be in state of continual mis-
cry. The farm suits me first-rate, but
1 can't 60 that organ"
Just what estimates those two men
placed upon each others veracity as
they separated will never he known.
MERCENARY MARRIAGE. = The Rev.
| ~ lo11 krr, III. frvlI v GOV q
Gold cannot buy happiness. and the
parents who compel their daughters to
marry for money and station, commit
grievous sin against humanity and God:
And the woman who marries churl
for his wealth will find that she has
made terrible bargain; that all the
gatherings of the heartless are but the
phosphorescent gleamings Of heart
wretchedness; that her life will be like
crag on the bleak side of a desert
mountain; there cold moonbeams some-
times glitter, but no sunshine ever falls,
no flowers bloom nor birds sing, but
wild storms howl and hoarse thunders
roar; and through the sweeping storm
shall be heard the stern voice of the
great God, saying:
"Your riches are corrupted, your
garments are moth-eaten, and gold and
silver are cankered, and the rust of
them shall be a witness against you,
and eat your flesh as if it were fire."
A SINGULAR FUNERAL.-The remains
of the Countess of Essex were inferred
at Watford recently, when his Lordship
had the funeral conducted in accord
ance with the reform lie advocated in
the Press some time ago. He had Il
hearse constructed somewhat in the
shape of wagonette, surmounted by
canopy supported from each angle by
simple iron bar, and trimmed with
heavy purple and white worsted fringe.
The body of the vehicle was painted
purple, picked out in white, and bore
coronet on the panels, and was drawn
by pair of his Lordship's horses,
driven by his coachman. His Lord
ships carriage, the carriage of the Earl
of Clarendon, and a hired carriage,
were the mourning coaches. The coffin,
over which was thrown purple velvet
pail, was of deal wood, the entire line
being perforated so as to admit of the
action of the earth. The railing round
the grave was painted blue and white.
Loss OF SELF CONTROL IN BATTLE
In his " History of the Civil War in
America" the Count de Paris gives
some curious instances of the loss of
self-possession among soldiers in the
heat of battle. He states that among