The true northerner., 1876-12-01
Pith and Point.

Pith and Point.
DOESN'T q man contract debt v10
he pays part of it n .......
Mrs. PARTrNeToN says Ike has bous1f
horse 80 spirituous that he always Ssss
off in decanter. .....
IF writer should attempt to turn -
prose into poorer rhyme, could he -
accused of making bad lOersef
"DD it rain tomorrow" Dutcbmaa
inquired of Frenchman. "Me gung
it was" replied the wise Frenchman-
"I AM glad that am once moro a
terra Gotta" said masculine Mrs Hx-
tington, as he stepped off from Csn-
arder at East Boston dock.
"WHY didn't you put on clean ooIIar
before you left home 2" called out "a
impertinent young fop to an omnib.s
driver. "Cause your mother hadn't
sent home my Washing" was ths ~
tinguishing reply.
SCENE in a New York police court
Judge" Prisoner, 1 find you guilty ef
intoxication in the public streets- Ia
punishment is $40 or ten days. Whish
will you take2" Prisoner / viii taAe
the $40, your honor"
A HoUsEKEEPER sent Bridget out Onn
morning to buy some heads of lettuoa-
She returned with postage stampe-
When asked how she made the mistake
she pertly answered, can sure. wasn't
told to get heads of letters"
A CENTENNIAL critic peing asked by .
Graphic correspondent which he liked
best, the statoos or the picters. replied
CT donno hardly, Zeb, bat on the hu1
praps I like the statoos best, cos you kil
go all round the statoos, but yOu can't
see ony one side O. the picters."
"OH, mamma, that's Capt Jones'
knock know he has come to ask 10
to be his wife !" "Well, my dear, yOa
must accept him." "But I though
you hated him so!" "Hate himi / do
so much that I intend to be his moth
erin-law." Revenge is sweet, especially
to women.
A MAIDEN lady said to her httas
nephew: "Now, Johnny, you 60 to bed
early, and always do so, and you'll bo
rosy-cheeked and handsome when you
grow up" Johnny thought over this .
few minutes, and then observed: "WeIl.
aunty, you must have set up good denk
when you were young"
A BURGLAR broke into palatial Yeai--
dence, chloroformed the inmates, got
possession of United States bond-l0Ok-
ing box, and carried it three miles into TIA
country before he ventured to open II,
and then, when he found in it only cuf
paper pattern for lady's night dress, ho
threw his dark lantern into the creek.
and, swallowing his skeleton keys, died
in abject modification.
A LIVERPOOL restaurateur advertises q
dinner, from IL to daily, as follows:
Scotch mutton broth, spring soup, roast
beef, boiled mutton, roast pork, stewed
beef, tripe and onions, mince collOps,
Berlin pudding, rice, apple, sago and
fig puddings, stewed rhubarb, and nice,
apple-tart, blanc-mange, cheese-ah for
25 cents. No wonder emigration is 60
ing the other way.
Mr.. LoNeFELnow CRoFFUT, of tho
Graphic, presents this view of q we'll
known red man:
"I'm the Sitting Bull you've heerd Of,
These is Mister Gutter trappings.
Now, behold thy child is hungry
Simple infant Of the forest
Hungry famished wildcat
Stomach like hollow poplar;
Tighter draw my beltum-no good;
Canteen nixy fiery water;
See tip him topsy-turvy
And there amt o bit Of smellum.
Injun hungry Injun thirstyl"
And he hammered on his stomach.
EDITH CHAT dreadful young firt)-
EDO you know, COZ, think / shall
marry /" Cousin with designs in that
quarter himself y" Really You amaze
me! Soon9" Edith-"Well, perhaps
in month or two." Cousin" And
may ask the name Of the happy mani"
Edith" what?" Cousin" The
man, the-er-what is it2-the intend
eda" Edith-"Ah, by the way-yes-
I must begin to think of that, too.
mustn't II"