The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1876-09-14

long at her hearthstOnep But perhaps
they might neutralize one another, like
two powerful poisons. There was
spice of comfort in that reflection, at
least; and Bessie Grumble wiped her
eyes, and almost smiled.
What was Mr.. Grumble's surprise, on
coming home that evening, fully primed
for domestic TRADE, on the subject of
button which had drifted down from
his shirt front during the day. to find
his especial easy chair, and corner of the
fire, occupied by an asthmatic old man,
whose head and face were enveloped in
silk handkerchief, and whose feet were
in tub of hot water. He stopped
short, in amazement and horror.
"This is Uncle Tompkins, Henry"
said Mrs. Grumble, who was busy warm
ing basin of cruel over the fire; and
the old gentleman extended one finger
without turning his head, saying, in a
cracked voice. 81 wish, nephew, you
would shut that door. Nobody ever
thinks of shutting door in this house
What's that noise up stairsl L beg,
niece, that your baby won't cry the
whole time that am here. Is tea ready2
If SO, will take cup Just here by the
fire."
"What does this mean, my DEAR"
calculated Mr.. Grumble, in a hurried
whisper; and his wife, whose arm he had
caught ON the way to the kitchen for
more hot water for Uncle Tompkins, re-
piled. in the same tone: "Oh! you
mustn't mind my uncle, dear; he don't
mean anything, only he's old and
whimsical"
But man has no business to
make everybody else uncomfortable in
this sort of way" muttered Mr.. Grum
BILE.
Tea was brought in at this moment-a
little smoky, it must be confessed, and
the toast considerably charred; but, just
as Mr.. Grumble was opening his mouth
to comment upon these facts, Uncle
Tompkins forestalied him by exclaim
ing What stuff this tea is ! One
would Suppose it was made of cab
bage leaves. The toast. too, is as black
as cinder. Isn't there slice of stale
bread in the house Z I'm dyspeptic,
and have to be very careful as to what I
| eat"
Mr.. Grumble silently devoured his
meal, secretly wondering how long Un-
Gle Tompkins meant to stay. No sooner
was Uuc tdDic ClcuISu lutil tllS lIIdSClDlo
old gentleman began egain: "Grum-
ble," said he, wish you'd stop that
creaking of your chair, my nerves are
30 weak; and if you could keep your
children up airs, that racket wouldn't
disturb me quite SO much. [ really
don't know how I'm going to stand that
| baby's noise"
"I do not think it is a very noisy
| Ill,
" It's teeth are very painful just atpres-
ent"
Mrs. Grnmble, who was stirring the
fire, in accordance with her uncle's petu-
liant request, said nothing, but smiled
quietly to hear her husband trying to
extenuate the baby's sins.
"Well," remarked Uncle Tompkips,
call babies are noisy. And, by the
way, Grumble, l wish you would oil
the hinges of that squeaking door; aud
don't like the smell of that geranium
in the window. Halo you haven't
any top button on your shirt front I
hope my niece isn't careless WIFE,"
"Not at all sir" said Mr.. Grunble,
nervously; " but the care of her child
and housekeeping duties absorb great
deal of her time The instant she finds
leisure she will look TO my clothes"
81 don't see how woman can spend
her whole time keeping house and look
iag after pack of children" observed
Uncle Tompkins, incl cledulously.
About ten o'clock the old gentleman
was ushered to the spare room, accom-
panied by q procession of medicine walls,
tubs of hot water, woolen dressing
gowns, and heated blankets for his feet
and his absence occasioned very general
relief
"What an insufferable old egotist
that is !" exclaimed Mr.. Grumble, throw
ing himself, with sigh of satisfaction,
into his favorite seat once more. my
dear Bessie, how could you endure his
eternal fault GndingG"
81 am accustomed to that, Henry it
is the lesson that most women are
obliged to learn" replied Mrs. Grum-
bic. with slight sigh.
Her husband pricked up his ears a
little uneasily. Accustomed to itl"
What did she mean2 1t was not possi-
ble-it conld not be possible-that he
was like that odious old Uncle Tomp-
kins. And yet he wished Bessie had not
spoken in that way. Somehow it made
him feel excessively uncomfortable.
Day after day passed away, Uncle
Tompkins growing more and more in
tolerable the whole time, while Mr..
Grumble improved the occasion by
making a sort of mental looking glass
of that worthy old gentleman.
"Upon-my-wOrd," said he to him
self, Z" l must have been perfect nui-
sance all these years. Why didn't
somebody tell me of it 2"
At length Uncle Tompkins went away,
flannel gowns, medicine bottles and all,
and on the evening of the same day Tom
Carlton arrived, from a temporary ab,
sence, nobody knew where.
g So uncle has been visiting you2" he
said, gayly, to Mr., Grumble.
Yes" said the latter, with slight
grimace.
"What sort of looking man is he p
Mr.. Grumble was silent moment
"Do You know" he exclaimed, burst
ing into a perplexed laugh, 81 couldn't
describe single feature of his face. He
was always enveloped, like an Egyptian
mummy, in a elk handkerchief, some
thing like that one you have in you
hand. With my permission he shal
never set foot in this house again."
"No |" said Tom, archly.
"The most intolerble fault finder
ever met with, )" said Mr.. Grumble; cab
solutely the most disagreeable man who
ever numbered the earth. / don't SEE
how it is possible to take exceptions tC
everything as he did,"
"That's not an uncommon failing,
J oloa~ua5 Tom 1apouralu oyoil