The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1876-12-14
JACK EASY.

JACK EASY.
How many have laughed over the
incident related by Capt. Marayatt in
his story of Midshipman Easy. In
presenting his hero to the public the
author tells us how the nurse was IN
stalled in eccentric NicOdOmuS Easy,s
home as follows:
Mrs. Easy did not find herself equal
to nursing her own infant, and it was
necessary to look out for substitute.
Now common person would have
been satisfied with a recommendation
of the medical man, who looks but to
the one thing needful, which IS a
sufficient and wholesome supply OF
nourishment for the child; but Mr..
Easy wa,a philosopher, and had lat
terry taken to craniology, and he de-
santed very learnedly with the doc
tor upon the effect of his only son OBJ
tanning his nutriment from an un-
known source. "Who knows" OBJ
served Mr.. Easy, IS but that my son
NAV not imbibe with his milk the
very worst passions OF the human
nature!'
II have examined her." replied the
doctor, land can safely recommend
her."
s.That examination is only preimi;,
nary to one more important" replied
Mr.. Easy. 81 will examine her"
Examine who. MIR. Easy !" ex-
claimed his wife, who had laid down
again on the bed.
| ssTho nnrsn nv dear.
Examine what, Mr.. Easy - con-
tinued the lady.
"Her head, my DEAR replied the
husband. 81 must ascertain what her
propensities are.''
81 think YOU had better let her alone,
Mr.. Easy. She comes this evening. and
| shall question her pretty severely.
Doctor Middleton, what do you know
of this young person
II know madam, that she is very
healthy and strong, or should not nave
selected her,
''But is her character good
Greatly. madam. know little about
her character but you can make any
inquiries you please. But at the same
time ought to observe that II you are
too particular on that point, you will
have some difficulty in providing your.
self.
"Well, we shall see," replied Mrs.
, Easy.
"And | shall feel" rejoined the s-us.
band.
This parlying was interrupted by the
arrival of the very person in question,
who was announced by the housemald,
and was ushered in. She was hand
some, florid, healthy looking girl, awk-
ward and naive in her manner. and ap.
parently not over-wise; there was more
of the dove than the serpent in her
: composition.
Mr.. Easy who was very anxious to
, make his own discoveries, was the first
who spoke. Young woman come
, this way. | wish to examine your
head"
Oh. dear, It's quite clean | assure
, you,' cried the girl, dropping cour'
tesy.
Doctor Middleton, who sat between
the bed and Mr.. Easy's chair, rubbed
his hands and laughed. In the mean
r time, Mr.. Easy had united the string
and taken off the cap of the young
woman, and was very busy putting his
[ fingers through her hair, during which
/: the face of the young woman express
ed fear and establishment.
), am glad to perceive that you have
: a large portion of benevolence.
: YES" replied the young woman
r dropping another courtesy.
!. s.And veneration Also"
!. "Thanky, sir"
). "And the organ Of modesty is strong
J. ~ developed.
Eyes, SIR" replied the girl with 3
t smile.
l. That's quite new organ" thought
o DR.. Middleton.
Undergraduates very power
full
Il If you please, sir, don't know
o what that is" answered Sarah, with 1
y courtesy.
n Nevertheless. VOW have given us ;
practical illustration. Mr.. Easy, an
it satisfied. Have you any questions t.
# ask But it is quite unnecessary.
l ITO be sure l have, Mr.. Easy Pray
e young woman, what is your name y
= Sarah. is YOU please, ma am.
..How long have you been married =
" married ma am -
e "Yes. married"
N If you please, ma'am had mis-
fortune, ma'am." replied the youn
le girl. casting down her eyes.
" what. have you not been mai
if ried -
of mo, ma'am. not yet.
lie Good heavens! DR.. Middleton
IF what can you mean by bringing thi
&c person here - exclaimed Mrs. Easy
~ mot married woman, and she has
child!'
Ii. If you please, ma am" interrupt
to ed the young woman. dropping cou1
tesy, 1T was very little one"
as "A very little one" exclaimed Mr.!
- Easy.
IS "Yes, ma'am. very small, indees
rs and died soon after it was born"
IT s.Oh, DR.. Middleton! What coul
ID you meant
lis INV dear madam. exclaimed tt