The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1876-02-17
PATES OF ADEERTLsLNG.
FACTS AND FANCIES.s

/
TRANSPORTED for life. The Hau who
marries happily.
MANY a man has ruined his eyesight
sitting around in bar-rOom looking for
work. a-zsf =f
A WESTERN man says that figures
won't lie unless. they happen to be on
gas meter.
FIFTEEN million pinsare manufactured
annually in the United States. And yet
men will get married. E
"CoURTsHIP is bliss" said am ardent
| young man. Z" Yes, and matrimOny Is
| blister" snarled an old bachelor.
TEACHER What is the definition of
| airtatiOn ~ Intelligent young pupil
| g 1t is attention without intention"
"PM married now" was the excuse a
| Chicago youth gave a florist for not buy
ing as many boquets as in former years,
SIX locomotives are required to haul
/ heavy train through the snow drifts on
| the Central Pacific railroad over the
| Sierras
WHEN a man dies nowadays worth
over 81 ,OOO, 600 the first question every
| body asks Is: How many wives does
he leave?7
s'YEs, [ want my daughter TO study
! rhetoric" said a Vermont mother " for
she can't fry pancakes now without smok-
ing the house up"
SWEETS TO THE SWEET
'Tis sweet to sit at eventide
Some wiIlin' female form beside
And lOve-like pUrr and snickeri
To feel, whatever devilish arts
Are sund'rIng other kindred hearts,
You two are growing thicker.
No CHINESE bank has failed for five
hundred years. When the last failure
took place the officers heads were cut of
and flung in a corner with the other as
sets.
MDILE. O. .zof the PaIais Royal thea
tire, said to Hyacinth Gracious! but
I have q cold. What do you do when
you have cold % 81 D." said Hyacinth,
g cough" ..-.. 49,.
THREE hundred dollars is what a Del
aware man had TO pay for calling Il
Young lady red haired. The Jury de
cided that she lacked a hairs breadth of
having red hair. .
CRooUET is rapidly giving way To
roller skating in London, and the ladies
newspapers are publishing concise rules
to promote gracefulness of movement and
proficiency IN the sport.
THE Minneapolis Tribune declares this
to be a verbatim copy of a 8 pOme ad-
dressed to a lady of that city by a love
sick youth from Indiana
I inst cum down from the buckeye state
some pleasure for to find handsome
girl from minaPlis Just suited to my
mind.
Her ROSY cheeks and rolling ewes like arrows
pierced nv breast and they y7ealled her
handsome clara the lilcy Of the west.
1 corted her for just 5 days, her love thought
to gain to soon, to soon she s1ted me
which gave me grief and pain.
she robed me of my liberty and deprived me
of my rest but still ] love my clara the
liley of the west.
MY DREAM -.-a-
| dreamed a dream the other night down by
Won shady grove | saw q chap OF high
degree convercing with my love
he sung he sung so merryly while Twas soar
Oprest and ne sung to lovely clara the
liley of the west. za
rushed up to my rival It dagger in MY hand
| toar him from my true love and boldly
made him stand.
beinp mad TO desperation my dagerspierced
his breast and was betrade by clar"
the liley of the west,
The softer sex have reason to he eli
couraged. The last census showed the
number of idiots proper IN the United
States to be "a, ,527, of whom 4,42J were
males and 1902 females
MAMMA" said a preeocious little
boy, who, against his will, was made to
rock the cradle of his baby brother, eff
the Lord has any more babies to give
away, don't you take 'em.
TIE Brooklyn Argus says The crud-
itv of religious information at the west
is well illustrated by tradition which
extensively prevails that a Baptist is a
man who puts water in his whisky.
THERE are now eight pin factories in
the United States, which make $1,000
900 pins daily But the average school
boy wonders why they are notabcnt in
the right shape to place on a chair with
the point up.
A WISCONSIN editor illustrates the
prevailing extravaganza of people nova
days by calling attention 10 the costly
baby carriages in use, while when he
was a baby they hauled him around by
the hair of his head.
CHARLES DUDLEY WARNER, who
feared that the pie-eating prOcliyities of
our cOuntrymen would yet prove the
ruin of America, viii be gratihed to
learn that the ri Etas were burned out
in the destruction of Hollis Hall at
Cambridge.
PECUIIARITIEs of Nancy Valentine, Of
Cumberland, Maryland, aged 100 years
!. Has never used spectacles. :. Gan
thread a needle with ease and precision.
8. Does her own cooking 4. Knits
stockings for sale; and (5), spins the
wool herself.
YES, women are unreasonable, and
YOU mav lave remarked that when one
sits down IN a new silk dress On chair
where a neighbOT's child has carelessiy
deposited two cents worth of tafiy, she
will go on about il just as bad a. if 1t
were two dollars worth.