Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1876-08-03
Curious Names in the London
Directory.

lHERE are the names of trades
which have become surnames. such as
Smith, Baker, Chandler, Cooper:
names OF occupations now rarely de-
noted by these words, such as Chap
man, Franklin, Webster, Fletcher:
names OF trees, of flowers, of fruits. of
herbs, OF quadrupeds, of birds. of
fishes; names of counties, towns and
villages; names of forests, rivers and
heathS; names Of clans and feudal
houses; Christian names, with the adj
dltlon OF S, on or son, such as Edwards,
Jameson Williamson. But perhaps
the most curious and interesting of
all surnameS are those which refer to
personal characteristics. We have
been at some pains to ascertain what
the directory could teach in this mat
ter. Looking at our friends and rela-
tions, we find the names of Bulb Gan
additional letter here and there must
be eXpectedD, Bulbs, Child, Boys, Laid,
Mann, Brothers, Lover, Friend.
Neighbor, Maiden, Bride, Husband,
Spouse, Fathers, Uncles, Cousins and
Widow. In the lOvable little creatures
we have Fairbairn, Fairchild, Good
child, Fairey, Doll, Darling, Dear and
Angel. If we ask what our friends
are made of, corporally speaking, we
find the origin of the surnames Bone,
| Blood, Skin, Hair, Fat; and Organi-
cally considered, Heart, Plate, Skull,
Brain, Temple, Cheek, Beard, Whisker,
Tongue, Tooth, Gum, Neck, Side,
Back, Armes, Hands, Nail, Legg,
Shanks, Calf, Shin, Foot, Sole, Heel
| and TOe-almOSt enough for a COM
plete human being. Then, speaking
of the height of those around us, we
have Long, Longman, High, Low,
| Short, Shorter and Tall; and of their
size OF build, Thin, Light, Lightbody,
| Slight, Slimm, Flatt, Little, Little
| john, Small, Smallbone, Smallman,
Round, Square, Bigg, Stump, Thicke,
Large and Heaviside. If our friends
| please us, personally or morally, we
have plenty of acceptable names to
give them-Nice, Pretty, Neat, Sweet,
| Gentle, Softly, Good, Allgood, True,
GoodenOugh, Faithful, Thorough
| bred, Best, Patient, Perfect, Meek,
Hale, Quick, Sharp, Hardy, Bold,
| Strong, Eager, Smart, Pleasant, Merry
and Merryman. If they are unWel-
come to us the Directory supplies us
with the epithets--Coward, Moody,
Slow, Snowman, Hurry, HASTE, Rough,
Bragg, Blunt, Sly, Lawless, Savage,
Stiff, Dull, Sadd, Cross, Silly and Cab
ey Setting aside such antagOnistic
couplets as Rich and Poor, Body and
Soul Heaven and Earthly, Young and
Old, Summer and Winter, Noon and
Eve, we may follow orr friends to
their daily meals, and trace how their
| breakfast materials are denoted for
them in the surnames Bread, Cake
bread, Roll, Bum, Lunn with or
without Sally, Butter, Eggs, Bacon,
Ham, Tongue, Herring, Coffee and
Cream. Then for dinner they may Sc
lect among the names Bull, Bullock,
Cow, Meates, Chine, Calf, Veal, Hogg,
Pigg, Sheepshanks, SWiney, Triple,
TrOtter, Mutton, Lamb, Lambshead,
Deer, Rabbit, Hare, GOosey, Gosling,
Gander, Capon, Duck, Drake, Fowls,
Chicken, Pigeon, Pheasant, Grouse,
Lark, Partridge, and very large va
riety of fish. Some of these good things
may be stuffed with Sage and Onion /;
they may have as accomplishments
Rice, Salt, Pepper, Mustard, Ginger,
Curry, Mace and Spice; they may be
followed by Pye, Jelly, Cheese, Orange,
Lemon, Mellon, Pears, Plum, Mutt
and Figg, and may be washed down
with Porter, Beer, Stout, Mead, Perry,
| Claret, Cape, Mountain and Hollands.
UnwelcOme but inevitable comes the
last scene of all-Pale, Weakly, Bald,
Illman, Dye, Death, Deadman, Cold
man, Hammer, Nail, Black, Coffin,
Hearse, Church, Parson, Clerk, Serv-
ice, Churchyard, Sexton, Shovel,
| Grave, TCmbes and Monument. Bal
|