Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1876-08-24
Y1isfellameuns &eadimg.
DEAD BROKE.

DEAD bhVAEs
We found man seated on curbstone near
the post-oAice, last night, muttering to him.
self apparently, as there was no one else to
mutter to. We felt constrained to ask him
what he was doing.
"Hain't doing nothin'," was the reply.
"Where do you belong"
"Don't b'long nowhere and nowhere don't
b'long to me-"
"Who are you ?"
"I'm Broke"
"Well, suppose you are broke, you've got
q name haven't your What is it?"
II tell you I'm Broke-Dead Broke-thats
my name and that's my natur. My father
was Broke before me. If he hadn't been, I
wouldn't be Broke now-at least not 80 bad.
NV mother was Pease, but she wanted 8
husband, and she got Broke-thats my dad
and Broke got me. I've been broke ever
since"
For few moments the unhappy D. Broke
buried his face in his hands and seemed lost
in the most dolefal reflections. Then, raising
his head, he exclaimed, bitterly:
"I wish had been born colt!'
"Why do you wish you had been born a
colt ?"
because colt amt broke until he is two
or three years old. I was Broke the moment
I saw the light, and I never forgot it. 1t is
hard to be broke so young"
"How did your parents come to call you
Dead Broke p"
"Well, you see, as soon as !! was born, some
thing seemed to tell me that had got to be
Broke all my life unless could get my name
changed by act of Legislature, and that, you
know, would be an impossibility."
"How an impossibility 7"
cane you such blockhead as to suppose
that man can get anything through the
Legislature when he is broke"
"You are right. Go on"
"When the conviction forced itself upon
my infant brain, confused as it was by recent
experiences, that must be broke all my life,
felt that there was nothing left to live for,
and lost all consciousness at once. q have
found only part of it since) He is dead !
cried my mother, wringing her hands. Yes,
groaned my father, dead Broker Irevived,
alas! But Dead Broke became my name,
and have been dead broke ever since. My
name has been4atal to me all through life.
The smallest boy in school always broke me
in playing marbles. I broke more windows
than any other boy in baseball. always
broke down at recitation, and had my head
broke every day by the schoolmaster. When
I left school I went to clerk it for broker.
One day there was heavy deficit in the &C.
counts. I was afraid he might think that I
had something to do with it, so II broke.
They caught me though, and put me in Jail;
but broke out"
"Out of jail2"
"No, broke out with the small pox!"
"What did you do nexta"
"After the court had disposed of my case I
was allowed to 60 into the brokers' business
again"
Chow was that?"
II broke stone in the penitentiary-dog on
it'll After had got out broke everything.
/ broke my promise, broke The Sabbath, and
broke the pledge"
"Were you ever married" :"
eyes," signing deeply; "matrimony broke
me up worse than anything else. My wife
was regular ripper. She broke up my fur
niture and dishes, nearly broke my back with
fat-iron, and finally broke my heart"
"By running awayl"
"No, indeed, by sticking to me-"
"You have had hard time of it"
"All owing to my name. But badas dis
like it, it's mine. I came by it honestly.
You wouldn't think anybody else would want
to be in my place, would YET but there are
thousands Of impostors all over the country
trying to pass themselves off for me"
"In what way?"
"When they tell their creditors that they
are Dead Broke"
There was another pause, during which the
unhappy possessor Of an unfortunate name
could be heard to sob. At length he broke
out:
"It will be simple and fitting inscription
for my tombstone, though"
"What~
"Dead Broke."- Sat. Night.