davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Ancwsparer published in Bolton, England,
contains the following advertisement: want
ed Immediately, an idle, drunken carter. The
advertiser has had so many sober carriers that
he wants a change; but a moderately sober
ono would not be objected to. Inquire, etc"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

The question, where do all the pins go?
seems to be in a fair way to be answered.
At least pupil in the public school who sat
down on one the other day had no difficulty
In deciding where 1t had gone, but put his
hand on the place at one, and spoke about it.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

\ young man in Chicago was recchtly
found dead IN his bed, and the supposltion
was that he had committed suicide by Dol-
soning; bat upon analyzing the contents of
his stomach nothing but the following were
found in 1t; Pickles pound cake, lemonade,
cold turkey, beer fried oysters, cold punch,
ham sandwich, sponge cake, beef tea, nince
PIE, champagne, lobster, game PIE, fruit cake.
,ea, chicken salad, whiskev, coffee, bologna
sausage, port, cheese, sardines and sherry.
The jury returned verdict OF Died through
the visitation of friends"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Then you won't lend me your veocpede,
hey.' inquired one boy Of another. mo, |
won't" Very well then, the next time our
chimney catches fire you shan come into our
back yard and holler"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

suppose" said Mr.. Adolphus Slabside,
our village school teacher, addressing the
first geography class, "suppose-now listen,
boys and girls-I were TO go out here on the
playground and pierce a hole through the
center of the earth, and drop a stone in il,
where would ii come out?" "Out of the
other end of the hole, sir was the ready re-
spouse of little Johnny Sharp.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Somebody broke into the house of Mr.. L.
y Blackman, editor of the Decatur (Mich)
Republicans, one night, not long ago and stole
S7O45. thus were the carefully.hoarded &C
cumulalIons OF many long years of inces-
sant toll swept away single night-Louis
rifle COUyicr,j0U17.al
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

What time is 2" asked one passenger of
another in Detroit depot the other day
Ten minutes to wait" was the answer, as
the man looked up from the timetable.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

4 pious but uneducated judge closed sen
tcnGe with the following touching reproach
Prisoner at the bar, Nature has endowed you
with a good education and respectable fami-
" connections instead of which you 60
providing around the country stealing ducks"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

When you remember that fifty years ago
you could buy four cigars for a cent, all this
enthusiasm about national progress seems
to be very grevious error.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Meanncss is not such detestable quality
after all, for temperance lecturer is quoted
as saying that it is this very thing that saves
men from becoming drunkards.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

A Trenton editor makes the statement, for
the good of correspondents, that they need not
commence then communications, IL take my
pen in hand" -, he don't care whether they
write with thci rocs or with the pen in their
mouth, so they >cud the news.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Much has been said about the gOahead
iiiveness Of the Western people, but there is
many a man in the region Of Chicago who
has been known to stop short in the midst OF
an important job just to watch an Illinois
girl trying to climb u hay stack--BrooLlW
irgUS.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

An exchange speaks OF woman so cross.
eyed that when she weeps tears from her right
eye they drop on her left check.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

An exchange defines blunderbuss as kiss
ing the wrong g,rl; Just as though it were
possible to be wrong in kissing any girl.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Was the crowd tumultuous?" inquired
one man OF another who had just come from
mass meeting.
TOO multuous oh. no; just about null
tuous enough to comfortably fill the hail.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13
BUDGET OF FUN.

Lavender says his wife is always ready to
tell her age.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Why is the letter "o' like two quarters OF
beef? Because it is half of "ox,'
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

SELF ASsE"1 ioS.-Molllc Stockton, of
Winuemucco Nevada, publishes Il card in
the Steer stat 'Nplainlng why she was com.
PEELED to put .; 'ead' on her school-mastcr.
Mollie says: Although | am. only fifteen
years of age, ! m we'll aware that the poor
female is to oftcu ramped upon without just
cause
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

According to the latest definition oache-
Tor Is a man who has lost the opportunity OF
making a woman miserable.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

The newest floral sentiment: III yon
wish for hearts ease, don't look to marlgolu.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

The following epitaph is from a tombstone
in Indiana:
Under This sod our Babic Lies,
il neitl or Cries nor iIolErs
IT LIVED Just twenty ! Days,
And cost us 50
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

1t is a happy moment in young glf.s li'e
when she discovers that her lover S mustache
and her hair are exactly the same shade
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

Teachrr-"What is the definition of tiirta
tom" Intelligent young pupil-"ltis alien
ton without intention"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

y well.bred man makes Il sandwich at nm
sci when he wears two mustard plasierS.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

IF you have business blow" 1t,
II you have a mission" go it,
lf you love maiden show il.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

ALL WE!L.-A resident who reached De
troit by a noon train yesterday, after an alb
sence of two weeks, was met at the depot by
his eight year old son, who loudly welcomed
HIM.
And is everybody well, Wiliie:' asked
the father
the wellest kind" replied the boy.
"And nothing has happened?'
Nothing at all I've been good. Jennie s
been good, and never saw ma behave her.
self so well US she has this time
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1876-05-13

And is everybody well, Wiliie:' asked
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
San Francisco News.

SAN FRANCISCO, May Sth.-The first
dividend on California was declared
to-day-two dollars share.
The Associated Country Press met
this afternoon for the purpose of elect
ing Board of Directors. Only ten
members were present, and as the
number did not constitute quorum,
the meeting adjourned until to-mor-
row morning without transacting any
business.
Eugene Casserly and Mark Melon
aid have resigned as Chinese Commits
sioners to Washington. p. A. Roach
has been elected in Casserly's place.
Colonel Daniel Norcross has retired
from the Neao Age, the official organ
of the Odd Fellows.
Capt. James Towles, who for num-
Der of years has been captain of the
guard at the State Prison, has been re-
placed by James Hawkins, late Scr
geant-at- Arms of the State Senate.
The weather for two days past has
been the warmest of the season. To-
day at half past one the temperature
was n degrees.
In New York to-day, at three P. NJ,
gold closed at 1l2 5-S.
Private cable reports silver So.
Highest bid here Is IA.
Interruption of cable prevents full
ler report.
The Grand Encampment l. o. o. F.
met this morning at ten o'clock, all
the members being present. The fore
noon was occupied in hearing and ac-
cepting the reports of the various Off
GERS. A communication was received
from Miss Ida G. Johnson, the only
surviving member of T. Rogers john
sons family, thanking the Lodge for
their many kindnesses to her fat her
and mother in their last illness, and
presenting TO the Lodge large and
elegant writing desk, formerly the
property of her father. The gift was
accepted and committee appointed
to draft and engross an expression of
the thanks Of the Lodge, to be given
to the donor.
Between two and three o'clock this
morning, an officer while passing a
grocery store on the corner of Dupont
and Francisco streets heard suspicious
noises from the store, and on in.
vesiigation ascertained that the lock
on the door haG been broken and three
burglars were at work OH the inside.
He then went for another officer. The
two returned in time to see the three
burglars leaving the premises with
the door wide open and full head of
gas on. The two officers chased them
into Bay street, where they were ap.
parently cornered. The thieves recog-
nzed officer Supple and threatened to
kill him if he approached them. Sup
pie drew his pistol and attempted to
shoot, but the weapon missed fire. In
the meantime two of them escaped
over u fence, but the third, Lewis
Ronslel, was captured before he had
time to follow his companions. A
complete set of burglars tools and q
large dirk knife were found upon him.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
More about the ExpIO,iou.
Adams on the Situstion,

A dispatch from Boston, received
yesterday states that in response to
InterrogatQries of al interviewer, Chas.
Francis Adams declared that lie had
no itching for the Presidency; that it
is thankless office at best, and who.
ever has it now must expect a hard
time, with additional care and trou-
bile; that neither party, as such, Is
likely to come to him, because he is
not in sympathy with politics and
never acted in party war. He
spoke kindly of Tilden as polite,
though not a broad man, who would
honestly strive to do right. Governor
Seymour he considered too fiuci Mating
in opinion and unsteady in purpose.
Hendricks had not much strength, ex-
cept in Indiana. We need as Presi-
dent man independent of party aud
sections, who has head of his own.
Grant had disentegi ated everything.
He had been surrounded by those who
would not advise him right. He had
had no policy of his own, and the
country was in chaos, and the question
was how to get it out. The result of
the election will depend on the Inde-
pendents, the great middle party,
which will act intelligently between
the two others.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
EASTERN NEWS.
A Great Catastrophe.

NEW YORK, May 8th.-The maga-
zine of the Delaware, Lackawanna &
Great Western railway in Jersey City,
exploded last night with terrific force.
A great quantity of giant powder and
nitro glycerine was stored in the build
ing Tor the purpose of blasting the
Bergen tunnel, and it is thought that
the catastrophe Is the work of strikers.
1t is estimated that five thousand
houses were damaged by the concus-
sion.
Another Riot.
CHICAGO, May S.-The striking
lumbermen have gathered to the num-
ber OF 300 or 400 this morning and are
engaged in riot at Twenty second
street.-the lumber district. Nearly
the entire police force of the city has
been massed in that vicinity and
serious fears are felt. Eight of the
rioters have been injured, two quite
seriously from the discharge OF po-
licemens' revolvers. Que of the Off
GERS which one of the strikers attacked
came near being torn TO pieces by the
enfuriated mob. There is no work
doing this afternoon. The strikers
were armed with pistols and clubs.
An immense crowd ,aggregating many
thousands are in the vicinity of the
disturbance awaiting events. The
strikers are principally ignorant for
eigners; their present actions are by
order of the Communistic Council.
More about the Explosion.
JERSEY CITY, May Sth.-It is said
there are peculiar circumstances at
tending the terrible explosion at Ber.
gums Tunnel Saturday evening, which
point to the stri k. rs as the perpetra-
tors of he fiendish deed. Out Of 600
employed there are $50 on strike.
The strikers demanded increased pay
Saturday, but only partial conces-
sion was made.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
New Books.

"Sea and Shore; a Sequel to Miri-
ANS Memoirs,n by Mrs. G. A. War.
field. L. b. Peterson & Bros, Phila-
delphia; A. Roman & Co., San Fran
cisco; l.. Levin & Co., Los Angeles.
"Sea and Shore" Is cast in the form
of an autobiography, and is entranc-
ing from the first. AS the heroine
draws near the time of her majority,
she takes passage at Savannah on
steamship for New York. The steam
er takes fire in mid ocean, and after
long exposure and incredible suffering
upon raft, Miriam, together with
few others, is rescued In an uncon-
scious condition by ship In which is
her terrible enemy, the executor of
her fathers will. He has had her de-
scribed as an escaped lunatic, and per-
suades the Captain of the truth of his
statements. Accordingly she is given
up to her enemy's possession, and up
on the ships arrival in port she is TAX
en- ashore and carried to his house.
Here she is surrounded by every lux
ury, but kept close prisoner. Her
jailor inflicts upon her the most re-
fined tortures to make her yield to his
will, but she keeps up a brave heart
under circumstances that we would
think would crush the reason out of
any one. The interest of the book be-
comes most intense here, and the
reader is kept in constant state of
suspense in following the incidents of
her captivity, for the author seems to
have experienced every emotion of
love and hate, jealousy and fear, that
has inspired the creations of her pen.
There is contagion in her earnest
ness, and we doubt not that numerous
readers will follow the fortunes of the
beautiful and much prosecuted Miri-
am with breathless interest. We will
not detract from the pleasure eff those
who will read the book by sketching
an outline of the story from this point
to the conclusion. Suffice it to say
that no description could do justice to
the ingenuity of plot and the dexteri-
ty with which its tangled threads are
unraveled by the practiced author.
We refer our readers to the book it.
self.
"The Dilemma; Novel" by the au-
thor of "The Battle of Derking." Har-
per & Bros, New York; Levin & Co.,
Los Angeles.
The readers of "The Dilemma" will
find therein much of the quaint style
and clear thought which so pleased
and fascinated them in "The Battle of
Derking." The plot of "The Dilem-
ma" is we'll laid and the incidents ad-
mirably worked.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

STILL another reason for modera-
tion in discussing and dealing with
the Chinese question is that any seri-
Gus outbreak or violence in this regard
will injure our prospects in financial
point of view most materially, in that
1t will tend to destroy our insurance
business, from the fact that the most
natural logic of such an event will be
to destroy all confidence in the securi-
ty Of property. Hence it becomes all
property holders to make this a mat
ter of personal concern, and see to it
that the temper of the meeting shall
be controlled by the conservative ele-
ment of our community.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
NEWS OF THE MORNING.

French politics are still in a muddle. The
lmperialists are stirring up trouble with the
Communist question in the hope of gaining
some advantage therefrom. 1t is said they
are seeking for the Communist amnesty and
adopting other systems to catch the present
dynasty.
Rochefort seems still TO be a thorn in the
side OF the French administration
LIE Grange, the superintendent of the Mint,
was on the stand yesterday in the Spaulding
trial. He knew Pinney as a minister and be-
lieved him honest. LIE Grange tried to shield
Sargent.
Gold closed yesterday in New York at ll2115.
The coal mines at lone, Amador county, are
being examined by party OF capitalists with
view of developing them if on inspection
they appear worthy of the outlay.
Dom Pedro has arrived In Washington.
The tornado in and around Chicago and vi
cinity on Saturday was very severe, even to
the extent Of overturning railroad train on
the Illinois Central railway. By this accident
number of prominent citizens were serious
ly injured.
The fight between Blaine and Bristow for
the Cincinnati nomination wakes warm,
either faction of the party claiming that its
champion has the best chances.
1t is believed in we'll informed circles tina /
Schenck will be exonerated from the charges
Of fraud in the Emma mine matter 1t is
however considered that his connection with
the dictatorship in the company was incom-
patible with his position of Minister.
Philadelphia dispatches state that the
opening day will present in general the
greatest display the world has ever witnessed.
The Georgia Democratic delegation is re-
ported wholly non-committal on the Presi-
Dental nomination. Morton has the major
fly among the Republicans.
George w. Upton, of Oregon, appointed by
the resident an alternate cadet at large, has
passed an examination to I'LL avacancy and
been admitted to the military academy.
The House Committee ON Indian Affairs
will report tavorably on Lanes bill to remove
the Indians from the Umatilia reservation
and open it to settlers.
A miner arrived In Cheyenne yesterday
from the Black Hills with 5000 in gold dust.
The arguments on the question of jurisdic-
tion in the Belknap case will be closed to-day
Opinions differ as to the result.
The following changes have been made in
the postal service on the Pacific Coast: Es-
tablished-Janal, San Diego county John AL
exander, postmaster; Potrero. San Diego
county, r. D Perry, postmaster. Postmas-
ters appoInted-J. L. Nugent,San Bernardino.
Assassinations of Christians continue in
Turkey. In salonica the French and German
consuls have been murdered. Fighting was
accustomed by the effort of the Christians, who.
under the counsel OF the American consul,
attempted to take a woald-be convert from
the Turkish quarters of Salonica. An effort
has been made by the government to punish
the offenders. A division of the French
squadron proceeds Immediately to Salonica
70, oct tho Chrisiiana
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

ONE of the strongest arguments In a
humanitarian point of view that we
can suggest, if 1t were necessary to
make any appeal to the sense of pro-
priety of our fellow citizens upon the
Chinese question.is that the natural
effect of a violent outbreak in the
great cities of the coast will be to in
cite wild exhibition of brutality and
bloodshed, which in China will fall
upon the innocent heads of American
residents there. Let us move in the
matter with discretion and dignity.
Let US regard our legal responsible
ties. and thus render our appeals to
the Government the more potent, and
the better entitled to respectful con-
sideration.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
Removal.

Messrs. Johannsen & Co. nave removed
their large furniture warehouse from Ducom-
NUNS building to the building on Main ST.,
near First, formerly occupied by L. Roeder.
The public are invited to call at the new es-
tablishment and inspect the elegant loi OF
goods OH display which comprises everything
in the line of furniture and upholstery, from
pine table and bedroom suit TO an elegantly
carved paror set. With largely increased
conveniences, and many new advantages,
Messrs. Johannsen q Co hope to keep pace
their GUS Omers the best establishment of the
kind In the city
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

IN consequence of the great depre-
citation in silver during the last few
years, the New York Chamber of Com
merce has voted to call an interna-
tional convention for the purpose of
arranging for the establishment of a
common standard of coin values.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

The San Francisco police are very
successful of late In looking up the
Chinese gambling dens. On Thurs
day last a very extensive establish
ment was broken up and all of the
tools captured.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

ON Wednesday last, the House of
Representative gave the contested
seat fromn Chicago, to LIE MoYNE,
Democrat. The case has been very
tedious and it is well that it is at last
settled. Mr.. FARwELL takes back
aoat
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

THE Democracy of San Diego, at
the recent election of delegates turned
out with unusual unanimity and
strength. Our neighbors appear to be
In dead earnest this season.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

We suppose our Lower California
neighbors Of Real del Castillo. or San
Rafael, may now rest quiet. Senior
Canalizo of the Mexican Land Com.
mission announces his purpose to pro.
ceed thither as soon as his work near
the line is finished.-Sdn Diego Union.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

Attention is called to an advertise
ment of the loss of roll of legal cap
paper containing list of names. The
finder will confer a favor by leaving
it at the United States hotel Office.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
Latest kilograms.
Dispatches of American Press Associa.
tion by A. q r. Telegraph Co.
ESPECIAL TO THE HERALD ]
PACIFIC COAST.
For Los Angeles.

CALIENTE, May sth.-The Tele-
graph Stage OIL time with the follow
ing passengers for Los Angeles -
] Hartman and Charles Mullin.
Weather clear and warm.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09
The School Tax Defeated-Whv?

The following from the evening Re
publican so exactly expresses our
views as to the cause of the defeat of
the school tax last Saturday, that we
republish the article entire:
Many causes combined to defeat the
S25, 900 special tax for school houses,
and We hope such thing will never
occur again. Some voted against it
because the Board of Education last
year were extravagant and kept their
books and accounts in such confused
manner that no one could tell any,
thing about their affairs. Not few vo-
ted no on account of DR.. Lucky's con-
nectiOn with the schools and his sup
posed share in the extravagance and
mismanagement of the past year. A
large number voted no because the
1000 tax was advocated by the eve-
ming organ of jobbery, which has
urged every municipal extravaganza
to the extent Of swamping Los Ange-
les and plunging her irretrevably in
debt. In short, the proposition to
levy a special tax of S25, 900 Was slain
in the house of its friends, and as long
as the cause of education is edvocated
and upheld by several self-appointed
champions in whom the mass of yot-
ers have no confidence just so long
will all efforts to issue bonds and levy
special taxes be defeated. In the
name of education and in behalf of
the children deprived of school accom-
modations we trust these unpopular
people will step down and out.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1876-05-09

The City of Napa has voted against
q subsidy to Water Company, and
has saved the community from pro-
longed burden.