The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1876-03-26
KrrHY BEirEN orr or sronr
Mr.. Jeuk.'s Astonishing DiscoVery-A Poor
Place tor selling -torh.
~ NJ ~ ITTT7VFV717 y HIl no
A man named jerks came to n neichbor


A man named jerks came to neichbor-
ing VILLAGE some time ago with machine he
called " he jerks Motor jerks sad u was
tho most wonderful discovery of the age. He
said that the motive power was nothing hut
water All YOU hat to do was To- Vonr bucket
ful Of water into the receiver. anu II was in
stantly dccomposed into gnscs. nnd then the
csses started the machine. winch, jerks said,
would run from here 10 Peru with MALT pint Of
water. And Jenks said his little idea In coming
TO town was 10 give the people q chance TO sub
scribe to some Of the stock 81 the motor COM
piny jerks said he knew he was throwing
away his own chances 10y selling the stock. but
he was philantnropisi, and h. W intei t. give
his fellow men an opportunity 80 90 INFO hig
thing 80 he -at the machine up In the ONCE,
which was the only room In the building. so
that there would he no chancs for fraud, and a
number Of reope went around t. see IL work
First he poured some water into the receiver.
then he churned 1t ~ with Kind OF revolving
paddle. tnen hc olcuei The valve and stamped
on The floor ana the crank began to reyolve
wHsreat rapidly. The spectators all thought
1t cas wonderful, and jerks said that chat word
didn't cxlrsss the idea in fun. They examined
the mac hire, and saw That there W sneither hre
nor chemicals about IL. nor any smell OF gas (:
and jerks snid that they must now confess TIA
1t was just about the grandest achievement Of
the human intellect. DR.. Pots was at ut to
admit the fact when the crank slowed up ami
he h,arl a vehement
App ren:ly the sound came from beneath the
noor. II sounded liks man snecAls. but
jerks said WIS merely a '! llcnt expulsion Of
ga from the cylinder and as the crank went
ahead agRin rapidly, the visitors all thought he
must Ne El-uts ~ minute i"'el t"e5 hediu al d
other;
"Ah-ah ah-tschew-w-w!"
And then toe machine stoupcd until T. was
over, Or Potts began to look crus--cyci ut
jerks "a II he suspected something. but lcnk d.
SAID 1t one OF the peculiar properties Of
these decomDus1d gases to push oIt OF the evil
inier with a violent hlssins sound. and al
taOugh he had tired 10 prevent II, lie b. d found
IL to toe impossible.
Then tie mae Inc went on again swiftly. and
jerks WIS just directing his attention to the
pressure 'lse. wnicn stood at SO pounds 70
dead matt. sud the spectators heard evidence in
the cellar:
"Ah.ah.t chew-ew-cw! Beglrra. but III
snecze the mead III ,ne ef keen on"
incn the crank began to rcyniye again, aud
jerks getting very red ia the face. SAID lndis-
handy:
~ nich Of you gentlemen have been PLAYING
a trick on me uy y ciclns ventriioqnsinT Il
isn't the square thing"
before ANYBODY could answer they heard mn
ONE ter'ioic snc,zs IN the cellar accomnaaied
with an exclamation.
"No'ler Of Mo>os. but II bates Bluash'r
Il WI Yer Tor kctchin' ovid 90
Inc luac Inc came to dead hai,, j rTes-
entity 81 square yard II the loor began t. bulge
Ny. Directly human he a Appe red throDgh
the ouruii- HuG an lrshmau criwlrl out INTO
the room. jerks Ykei rcauvtn iaini aud the
man g"t;in; up Gnd brushing the cob Neps on
his b At. sand
MIR Jeuk,l It's meself tha''- tired Of iurnln'
that iutrraai crank down there ia thai dark
hole. TIC rats l. nihn'ln me les-. and It, 80
damp that M kvtchin' me death o. cOwld. I'm
giln to gave up the J11.'
While he was s2easin. Or. r it, discovered q
Nnc VII" running from the crank 10 the cellar
ANA hiddrh ~ the mtchl4cly. Jcuk- turned
whit" lnd -ttmnerei oIt.
" Is D. pant i. gent ens'. very painful. Hut
the fact i--i-I-l hadn't 4 l.el got rN rcre yer
to wnrhinZ rl.nt AMI want i I th'.-ht
that i- Ca. a., It, Ia. K lin< To- tI'tt'
And Jeh,- rtcI thrlugu t.e cnlr and left
tow. lie dldnt eel ANY si'c" Ina that COM
tu4iIlfN.