The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1876-10-20
Pith and Point.

A MAN can't travel into woman's
affections by getting on her train.
WIT is the boomerang that strikes and
graciously returns to the hand. Sarcasm
is the envenomed shaft that sticks in the
victims gizzard.
Or the great Italian writer's, it is gen.
orally conceded that Boccaccio hved in
clover, and Dante in fern, oh h!-COn,-
merciaJ Advertiser.
"WHAT is the worst side of naval
warfare2" asked a school-teacher. "The
broadside," replied the boy in the back
seat. He went up head.
SPRIeGs' wife woke him up at o clock
in the morning to say that she had de-
cided, on the whole, 10 have q dark
green suit and green velvet bonnet this
winter.
AN old bachelor having been laughed
at by party of pretty girls, told them:
"You are small potatoes "We may
be small potatoes, said one of them
"but we are sweet ones.
FIFTY cents "swear" is the fine for
swearing in Freehold, n. j. After q
Freehold editor is bored half an hour by
dRCuk AO supp O4 AAko
coat, hurries outside the limits OF the
town, saves $4,000 in ten minutes, and
returns feeling greatly relieved.
WHEN dog barks at night in Japan
the owner is arrested and sentenced to
work year for the neighbors that we're
disturbed. The dog gets off easier, be-
ing simply killed. Our enlightened
country has still many things to learn
from that more favored but less civilized
people.
The following are some of the rhymes
in Browning's new poem "Circle"
and "work i'll ;" "was hard" "h haz-
ard :" "whitewashed sides of it, "far
and wide 80 fit ;" "grunt is't. "con-
trapuntist :" "proven," Beethoven ;"
"my house." "pious - "pontiff,"
"won't if :" "lamdas," odd ass"
Chow MUCH will your new school
books cost, Johnnyl" says father.
(Johnny calculates to himself, soto voce).
"Lemme see; 90 cents for the singing
book, rs cents for new 'rithmetic, ST. %
for new Biography 25 cents for q
hockey, harf dollar for a new bat, and
quarter for candy" Then out aloud
says, "'bout 81, pal"
DEAD BEATING, as it is called, ought
to be abolished. 1t is q nuisance. 1t
was once reproved by certain "mine
host" in this wise: A preacher desired
that a reduction should be made from
his board-bill Cn account of his Z" cloth. !"
The host replied Friend, 1 have
observed thee. Thou hast eaten as q
sinner, and thou must pay as a sinner"
A SMALL boy was 80 unfortunate as to
remark at the breakfast-table, the other
morning, "Oh, dear I'm so sweaty,
quite to the horror of youthful aunt
Being reproved for the use of so inele-
CANT a term, he replied, "Oh, yes; L
know all about it. They talk OF horse
as being sweaty ; when it's man he
'perspires, but young ladies like you
only glow"
The Philadelphia Bulletin does this
sort of thing by the column: Miss
Henne, of the opera troupe, lad quite
an ovation, the other night, as she
warbled her lays at the Academy
Brignoli, the Nestor of IT, 70 company
was delighted to have her. chant-a-cleal
note, and the manager ,ackleated tina
she was the success of the season ant
would pullet through"
A WEALTHY Boston AN died recent.
and left all his pror ,erty to his wife o.
condition that she n iarried again With
eighteen months. A friend Of his VI
knew OF his pun pose previous.
death said to HIM ;: CT should thu ak "
would dislike tt .e idea of anot Ter m
enjoying your Money" "He gould n
be likely to enjoy it much under t
circumstance s." was the reply.