Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1876-08-25
Gleanings.
A musical era-an opera.

| \ proper fracton-a better half
| Sioux-ing machine-the scalping knife.
New school eloquence- college ORA
tions.
Where does a leading physician" gen
orally lead to?
Sitting Bulls pure Indian name is
"Tatonha Otehka."
The honeymoon is not pleasant when
you reach the last quarter-of a dollar.
Mother Eve was the first bellringcr-
She used to ring the chimes for Adam.
What letter would make every flower
alike? w would make all flowers wall
flowers.
People who pray loudest in times of
danger are those who pray least in times
of safety.
Bankers ought to prosper. They al
ways take so much interest in the busi
ness, you know.
A Sioux motto-"White man big and
smart he furnish brains; red man heap
brave-he knock EN- out.
Your undcrclothes don't seem to stick so
close when you read of those mountain
gorges still filled with snow.
''There is music in the chair" as the
violinist remarked when his wife broke
the instrument over his head.
An exchange ponders on the Eastern
troubles, and lucidly remarks Turkey
is redeemed. At least, the Sultan took it
from his uncle"
A private in the army sent letter to
his sweetheart, closing with, May
Heaven cherish and keep you from yours
| truly, John Smith"
\ minister asked boy what o'clock it
was. "About -, sir" was the reply
'Well," quoth the minister, 81 thought 1t
was more" ''lts never any more here"
said the boy; ''lt just begins at one
again"
4 Boston physician says that blowing
cornets or trumboncs Is the best exercise
women can take for the purpose of eX-
panding their lungs and making them
selves straight P'raps But they must
| let corsets and whalebones be blown
| first.
Croquet Is becoming every year more
and more unpopular. What chance has
girl of making catch, when, just rs
she has about completed her conquest,
and is ready to land her fish her whole
womanly soul impels her to raise a lump
on him with mallet, and call him red
headed cheat of loon.
| Quite an excitement was created in
Nashville a few days ago by the appear
ance of an uncommonly seedy looking
couple in dry goods store. The woman
ordered large stock of " tixings," for
which the man paid. She then asked
clerk to SO after parson, and upon his
arrival the rustics were married amid
pile Of muslins, calicoes and linen goods,
with grinning group of passers'by for
witnesses.
A Hibernian collector of soap grease at
the South End, who has driven around
the most shattered old frame that horse
hide could cover, appeared the other
morning, bucket in hand and on foot
When questioned as to the absence Of his
four-legged scarecrow he replied: Z" Och,
Mrs. Blonk, minny dollar Eve spint on
thin harses, an they do be dyin' on me
hans, bad cess to EN-" To this the
housekeeper suggested that perhaps 1t
would be better and cheaper to buy
good horse. "Thrue for ye, ma'am,"
replied the Grecian. "By me sowl, av l
see the morrow I'll buy good harse if it
costs me t,einty 1ollarst"-Boston Com
mercidI Bullettn.
A boy entered Woodward avenue
drug store, bottle in hand. and said he
wanted ten cents worth Of "arnaky-mo-
n.y." The druggist had him repeat the
word two or three times, and then said:
Now, do you mean arnica Or ammonia?"
81 dunno" was the reply "What is it
fors" asked the druggist. "11l be licked
if tell" replied the boy, starting slowly
out. He went as far as the door, got
bright idea, turned and said" If your
wife hit you on the head wltha chair-leg,
which of them medicines would you git
to take the swelling down?" Arnica."
"Then fill in ten cents worth" said the
boy, and he gazed lovingly at the big
sticks of licorice while the preparation
was being bottled.-Free Press.