Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1876-11-03
NBSBY.
. The Corners Denounce Bob Ingersoll's
InfdeIitY.

NBSBY.
The Corners Denounce Bob IngersolI's
Infidelity.
CoNFEDRIT X ROADS,
Wich is in the State NV Kentucky,
Sept. %, 1876.
The depth NV wickidniss hez bin
sounded by the Ablishnists at last
They hev Bob Ingersoll, NV Illinoy,
shreekin for Hayes, and agin our re-
form candidate, Samyooel J. Tilden.
To say that am shocked is to state
the state Nv my feelins mildly. Don't
they know that Ingersoll is a infd-
die? Don't they know that he don't
believe in revealed religion? Don't
they know that he haint no vital
piety?
l told Deekin Pogram NV it, and
when explained to him wat an in
fiddle wuz he wuz shocked.
"Wat! sighed the Deekin, "not
bleeve in religion? Well I'm id!
Let's hold meetin and pro test agin
the cussw
The Deekin's suggestion struck me
ez bein remarkably good one, and
| determined to act upon it. l he'd
my mail to git through with first, and
that took me nearly all day. l coold-
MT even stop to rebook inidelity till
l did my biznis. / he'd received
$1,000 from the Moo York Commit
ty, to be yoosed in sendin voters to
1njeanny-I he'd to reed two letters
from John Morrissey instructin me
how to yoose the money, and l he'd
to find quarters for an Irish brooser
who had been pardoned out NV the
States prison to assist in this cam
pane, and who he'd bin sent on to us
to show us how to work repeeters to
the best advantage. Atore | Good
assist in rebookin Republican intidel-
ity and casting a stigma upon relig-
ion, l he'd to git all this out of the
way.
l called the meetn at Bascom's,
our church not hevin been opened
for religious meetins sence johnson
went out in 1869. 1t wuz q lively
meetin. When the corners were in
formed Nv the impiety and irrelgion
Nv this pet Nv Republlkinism, there
wuz an indignashen manifested that
wuz trooly encurridgin. They wuz
all convinced that eff such a contem-
mer NV religion WIZ permitted to go
loose unrebooked, there wuz cussid
little hope Nv repubhkin institushens
and after drinkin around two or
three times we organized, l takin the
cheer.
| remarkt thet it wuz no ordinary
occasion thet he'd called us together.
Our liberties wuz in danger from the
republican party, and our religion
from the shockln infdelity Nv oneuv
it's chief advocates. We may lose
our liberty, but shell we lose our re-
ligion?
"Not by d--d sight" ejakil-
ated the awjence, ez one man.
l then presented a series NV reso-
lutions as follows:
WAREAs, the Republican party hev, on
the stump, advocatin its heresies, Bob In
gersoll, Nv Illinoy; and
WAREAs, Sed Ingersoll is middle Nv
the most radicle stamp, a man wich de-
nies the truths Nv holy writ
"Wat is Holy Writ" asked
dozen.
l he'd to stop and explain to EN-
thet Ingersoll wanted to destroy the
Bible, wich infuriated EN-.
can't we to be allowed to hev our
regler township Bible? Wat'll we
hev to swear witnesses on IN hoss
cases?" they Indignantly demanded.
"Go on! go on! down with the in
fiddle!"
WAREAs, The appearance Nv sich a
man on the stump is calkelated to outrage
the feelins Nv the Corners, and tare up
the bulwarks Nv society, therefore be it
Resolred, That the eleckshun of Tilden
and Hendrix is a necessity, and that after
this exhibition on the part of Ingersoll,
every Republican wich don't immejitly
iine US and cast his ballot for Tilden and
reform is unworthy Nv salvashun.
Aforc we took vote on the reso-
looshens we adjourned to take a
drink and while a takin NV it Joe
Bigler and Pollock come in. l shud-
dered when saw EN-, for in all the
twelve yeers anthem carpet-baggers
hev been here never saw EN- with
out antlssipatin trouble, and wuz
never yit disappointed.
When we came to order agin, Jo-
sef askt permission to maks a few
remarks. He slmpathised with the
meetin heartily. He knowd Inger-
soil and kuowd him to be an middle
and an unbeleever. Feelin that he
must add his unworthy testimony
agln sich man and sich doctrines
but eff the meetin wantid to hear
him they must git away from the
bar.
1t took some time to git EN- away,
for Louisville drummer for likker
house, happened to come in for a
drink, and the entire meetin gather
ed around him expectin to be asked
to take suthin. 1t wuz a bitter thing
for me to stay with sich an opportun-
ity afore me, but "duty first" Is my
motto, and | stuck it out.
The Louisville man hevin treated
the crowd twice, and there bein no
show that he would do it agin, they
reassemblcd.
Josef then remarkt that sympathi-
Yin with the objects NV the meetin
he he'd prepared some resolushens
hisself, which he should offer, with
the remark that eff he wuz interrupt
id he would proceed to wunst to lick
the interrupter out NV his boots in
less than a minnit:
WAREAs, The Republican party is lis
senin, jist now, to Bob Ingersoll, NV Him
oy, middle which denies the trooths NV
revelashen: therefore be it
Resolred, That Bob Ingersoll in denyin
the divinity Nv our Savior, inflix mortal
stab at the Dimocratlc party, to which a
savior is, especially. necessity.
Resotced, That Bob Ingersoll in deny
in the divinity NY our Savior. hurts oul
feelins ez Dimocrats, ez it wuz for us
mostly, that he cum into the world and
died.