New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1876-12-31

1 makes that. bat think 1t must 30 raw ap-
l nrentioee in the weather clerks tacs0y,
| who experiment and learn how N Now
| England, for board and clothes. ano ~. sI
| are promoted 70 mako weather i0r cO1ns k.
| that REQUIRE Q good article, and VIII tsn -
/ their custom elsewhere if they don's eet y.
| There is . cum ptuOus variety s0ous ~
| New England weather that compels sno
| strangers admirsti0n-and regret Ino
weather ia slwsys doing something shese'
always attending strictly to business, ~
ways getting mp new deeigns ana tyms
them on the people to SEQ how they VII ~.
But it gets through more business IN s?..f
than in any other season. In the spring
have counted 1856 different kinds Of westner
ineide of four MY hours.
II was / that made the fame soe
fortune of that man that had thee mar
Vicious collection of weather ON or
hibition at the centennial that 80 astoniehe0
the foreigners. He was going to travel AZ
over the world and get specimens from su
the climes. said: Don't do it,; you come
:, New Eoqlsnd on favorable spring
day" / told him what we conld do in the
way of style, variety and quai,sy.
Well. he came, and he made his collec-
ton in four days. As to variety,
why he confessed that ne GOT nun
dreds of kinds of weather that he bad nev0T
heard of before. And as to quantity; weiIs
after he bad picked out and discarded al
that as bIemished in any way, he not only
had weather enough, but weather to spares
weather to hire out; weather to sell; 20 &c
posit: weather to invest; weather to give 70
the poor. rhe people Of New England arc
by nature patient aud iCrbearing, but tnero
are some things which they viii! not stand.
Every year they kill lot OF poets Iof
writing about beautiful Spring" These
go .an.rally oosua1 yiaiforR who OflOR
their notions of spring from somewhere
else, and can not. of conrse, know how tho
natives feel about spring. And 30, the nfss
thing they know, the opportunity to inquire
how they feel has permanently gone oy.
Old Probabilities has mighty reputation
for accurate prophecy, and thoroughly wen
deserves it. You take up the papers ana
observe how crisply and confidently he
checks eff what to-day's weather 10 gong
to be on the Pacific. down South, IN the
Middle States, in the Wisconsin region, see
him sail along in the joy and PRIDE OF nls
power till he gets to New England, ana
then see his tail drop. He doesn't Know
what the weather is going to be IN new
England. He can't any more tel! than ne
can tell how mans Presidents Of the United
States there's going to be next year. Wen.
he mulls over it, aud by and by he gets out
some,bipp about like this: "Pr0bsble nor
east to sou'west winds, varying to tho
southland and westard and esstard ana
points between; high and low barometer,
sweeping around from place to place, prob
able areas of rain, snow, hail and draueht, ,
succeeded or preceded by earthquakes
with thunder and lightning" Then ne jof.
down this postscript from his wanderinE
mind to cover accidente: "But it is possible
that the programme may be wholly changed
in the meantime"
YES, one of the brightest gems in tho New
Englsna weather is the dazzling uncertainty
Of it. There 10 only oDe thing certain about
it. you are certain there is going to be plenty
of weather. perfect grand review; but
you can never tell which end Of the pro-
cession is going to move first. YOu FIX mp
for the drouth; you leave your umbrella in
the houee and sally out with the sprinkIng
pot. and ten to one yen get drowned. You
make up your mind that the earthqqake i
due; you stand from under and take hold Of
something to steady yourself. and the first
thing you know, you are struck by light
ming. These are great disappointments.
But that can't be helped. The lightning
there is peculiar; it is SO convincing when
it strikes thing 1t doesn't leave enough Of
that thing behind for you to tell whether
we'll, you'd think it was something valuAr
BILE, and Q Congressman had been there.
And the thunder. When the thunder
commences to merely time UP, and scrape,
and saw, and key up the instruments for
the performance, strangers say. "Why, what
awful thunder you have here" But when
the baton is raised and the real concert be-
gins, you'll find that stranger down in the
cellar, with his head on the ash barrel.
Now, as to the size of the weather in New
EDgland-lengthwsys. l mean 1t Is utterly
disprOportioned to the size of that little
country. Half the time, when it is packed
as full as it can stick, you will see that
New England weather sticking out beyond
Al L. Avn~
dreds and hundreds of miles over the neigh
boring States. She can't hold . tenth part
of her weather. You can see cracks all
about, where she has strained herself try
ing to do it.
could speak volumes about the inhu-
man perv-rsity of the New England
weather, but will give but single speci-
covered part of my roof with tin, with an
eye to that luxury. Well, sir, do you think
it ever rains on the tint No, sir; skips it
every time.
Mind, in this speech 1 have been trying
merely to do honor to the New England
weather; NO language could do it Justice.
But after all there are at least one or two
effects produced by it, which We residents
would not like to part with. If We had not
our bewitching autumn foliage. we sheuld
still have to credit tho weather with one
feature which cOmpensstes for all its bully
ing vag Ariee-the ice stcrm-when Q leaf
lees tree is clothed with ice from the bot
tenn to the top-ice that is as bright and
clear ss crystal; every bough and twig
is strung with icebeads, frozen dew
drops, and the whole tree sparkles,
cold and white. like the Shah Of
P-rsia's diamond plume. Then the wind
waves the branches. and the sun comes
out and turns all those myrisds of beads
and drops to prlsms, that glow and hum
and fash with all manner Of cOlOred fires,
which change and change again, with in
rapidly, frora blue to red,
from red to green, and green to gold; tho
tree becomes sparkling fountain, q very
explosion of dazzling jewels; and it stands
there tha acme. the climax, the supremest
possibility in art or nature of bewildering,
intolerable magnifcence,
One can not make the words too strong.
Month after mouth ! lay up hate and
grndge against the New Eng land weather;
but when the ice storm c mes at last, I
ay, "There. l forgive you now; the books
are square between US; you don't owe me
1 cent; go and Sin no more; your itsle
anl's and toibles count for nothing; yea
ire the most enchanting weather in the
world! Applause and lsughter).
The Lost Joint Rules.
Quite good joke is the result of the con-
roveIsy about the alleged abrogation Of
he joint rules of Congress. 1t was noticed
When the present session began that the
ale of liquors at the House restaurant.
which used TO be q furtive business. was
conducted without any attempt at CONCEAL