, 1876-07-02

ascending on that day. No one is allowed 70
cook or eat a meal at home under penalty OF
Instant and hurniliating incarceration Mrs;
D. A. Olin has arranged aud will supcrdntend
innurncrablc rcfresllment stands in East Park,
where lavish young men can purchase tne1r
lemonade "without j stick" cigars, chewing
tobacco, and gum and candy, from brtghtceycd
Godesses Of Liberty in white aprons aud they
cntreat all who have any consideration Tor thelr
respect to s'swared off - sherry cobhlcrs, rum
punches, anu mint juleps, while down town,
and purchase from the "dlvinities y aforesaid.
SPIKED HIS GUN.
The bold Captain had lost his last gun
wad,' gone home in disgust, and nestled INTO
his couch beside his sleeping spouse, who slept
peacefully. In few minutes the buSle of ye
ancient mariner, whistlcd and snortcd an
were neatly tucked AWAY in curl-papers, and
fastened With bandy-thighcd hairpns, that
looked like tongs. A dress party was on the
tapis next night, and the slumbcrng helplncct
was dreaming thereof. It was time 10 dress, SO SO
she metaphoTically fixed her eye. on big req req
pil,-cushion, gently uudid q natty curl, anu
iammcd the daugerous-looki hairpin into the
Captains nose. The buglc suddenly stopped
with an agonizcd snort, US "Sindbad" opened
his "fy-trap" and howled with pain. Next Gay
he lescautgd very learncdly to the boys at the
ststorc" on the "blood cruptions," /" but the ST.
cret leaked.
Miss Van Ostrand didn't come, but "Silas "
did, end he purposes charging his expenses TO
the Adyocatc.
A profitable aud pleasant ncclz-tie party, with
concomitants Of Strawberries and iee-crca1n, was
held in the parlors Of the NJ. E. Church last
Tuesday.
The Athlete Baseball Club is IN assured sue
cess. Their grounds, which will be the best III
the Northwest, will be incloscd and ready 1or
play Immediately nftcr the Fourth.
The College nine went to Milwaukee to play
the West Ends, but committed ilar-kan after
tho third inning by disabling their catcher, and
the game was declared off.
The man mentioned in last Sundays TRIBUNE
as having run away from his family on the plank
road last week committed suicide at or near st.
Louis shortly after.
Miss Emma Dean, an alumni Of the High
School, aud a lady loved by all for her many
graces and rnassuming character, died last week
after lingering illness.
An exciting runaway occurred on Main street
last Wednesday, which fortunately did not end
disastrously.
George @. Erskins is considerably on the wing
OF late Last week he returned from 4 North
crn tour to welcolne his accomplishing daughter
Nellie home from Vessar, aud next day started
for Washington, D. G.
WIN D. Kane of Chicago is an % ap9stolfslo9k sf }is
hand-shalze is US hearty us ever.
Myron Knapp, tho gifted silort-stop OF the
At1cthcs, returned from pow-wow with the
Chippewa Indians last Monday, scalp and all.
tsSitting Bull " couldn't catch him.
c. H. Lee, Esq, legal lumlnary OF much
prominence, has gene East to interview the
Rev. Henry Ward Bcccher on some unfinished
evidence, and took with him a pockctfull OF
chromos and d grip-sack full of ragged edges.
Dr. Joseph AlaxiMi1ian Alexander kords and
his accomplished bride have returned from their
"moncyhoon " trip. Old lovers met ut West
ern Union Junction and mingled tears.
No more cases OF "lcapfrog !" on Main street
crossings lately.