The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1876-04-18
A Beneficent Invention.

Those who were familiar with the ap
pearance Of district school.room thirt,
years ago would find little to remind then
Of those school days were they to enter
classroom in any of our public schools
to-day. Tho old.fashioned benches thai
afforded such delightful surface fol
carving, and that could be so easily tip.
ped over whenever boy felt that the
sight Of dozen pair of juvenile legs
waving wildly in the air would strengthen
and encourage the weary schoolmistress
have been replaced by elaborate chairs
nodded to fit the sinuosities of the with.
ing small boy, aud turning on pivots
entirely devoid of squeak. The capa.
cious desks, in which boards of apple:
and batteries of pop.guns could be easily
slowed away, have given place to smaller
desks, astutely contrived to hold only the
limited quantity of school.books in daily
use, and the rude blackboard of primitive
times has been succeeded by wide vain.
scot OF black plaster which encircles the
room, and which cannot be stolen, nor
covered with soap, except at vast out.
lay Of time and material.
These improvements are the work Of
ingenious persons. who apparently pass
their lives in the invention of new chairs,
desks, and other school.room furniture
1t would be difficult, if not impossible, to
calculate without the aid of blackboard
the immense quantity of patents that
have been recently granted for improved
school furniture. OF course, no inventor
claims to have originated the generic idea
OF chair or desk. 1t is, however,
apparently held at the Patent Office that
whenever man manufactures chair
w''h the back ut different angle from
that selected by the last preceding in.
rentor, he Is entitled TO patent, and a
similar theory leads to the issue OF pat
en,s to men who invent desks differing 10
SIZE from those already in use by half
or quarter OF an inch. When we con.
slder the multiplicity Of patents which
nave hitherto been issued, and the inge-
nuity which inventors have shown in
their efforts to produce ideally perfect
chairs and desks, it is odd that no one
has hitherto invented chair contrived
with view to the entire suppression of
jogging"
OF the evils Of jogging" it is uunec.
essary to speak. They are acknowledged
and bewailed by all school-teachers, but
they have been regarded as among the
necessary evils of the school.room. The
small boy is as prone to "joggle" as the
sparks are to fly upward, and although
muscular teacher can easily convince him
that the practice is fraught with danger,
he cam be induced to abandon it.
Many OF our best and noblest statesmen
have 'jogged' in their school.boy days,
and venerable matrons, whom the breath
OF scandal has never touched, know in the
secret reccssos of their hearts that in their
childish days they were "ioggled" BY
reckless schoolmatcs, and did not hesitate
to ''joggle' in return. In view of the
universally Of this neiarious habit, all
who are interested in the permauence and
prosperity of our school system will be
glad to learn that an inventor has at last
been found who has devised an absolute
cure io- jogging
Ihis invention, like many other valua-
BILE inventions, is charming in its simple
lty. In the seat Of each school lroom
chair he places a small metallic plate
connected by wire with galvanic bat.
terry placed within the teachers reach.
Every alternate chair is connected with
the positive pole OF the battery, while the
remaining chairs are connected with the
negative pole, Let us suppose that boy
addicted to Juggling seats himself on one
OF these chairs. He sof course, in close
contact with the metallic plate, and
though it is possible that the mind may
be thereby gently stimulated, he expert.
ences no shock, and remains unconscious
OF the fact that current of electricity is
passing through him. Presently the
Great Adversary tempts him to "jeggle"
his nearest neighbor. and he stretches
out surreptitious foot or hand, but no
sooner has he touched his victim than the
galvanic circuit is completed and the
unseen torturcr has them both in an mex.
orable grasp, Two yells of contompora.
neous human agony startle the school.
room. and the teacher bchods the "jog.
glcr" and the "joggled' writhing in an.
gulsh and unable to break the bond that
holds them in contact When this spec.
tacle has been fully seen by every schol.
ar, and the teacher has improved the oc.
casion TO point out the wickedness Of
jogging" he breaks the current and the
victims are released 1t is safe to say
that boy thus punished would never
"joggle' again, and that the chief effort
of every scholar would be to avoid the
slightest contact with another while in
the schoo.room.
An invention so ingenious and so eff.
cacious ought to be brought to the atten.
ton of every school.teacher in the land
Doubtless it will be exhibited at the Cen.
tennial Exhibition, where unsuspectinp
boys can be bribed to "joggle" in public,
and to thus illustrate the working of the
invention, while at the same time they
serve as frightful examples of the evil Of
jogging Let school.teachers take
The day is at hand when "jog.
CLING" with all its train of attendant evils
will be at an end. The peace of the
school'room will be kept by electricity,
and the detection and punishment of ey.
sry offender will follow instantaneously
the commission Of the offcnse.-N, Y.
Times.