Litchfield enquirer., 1876-03-30
CLIPPINGS,
A insEEgHH ahead-light Ion an ez. pFa'f fraif' f'1E 5
 Tho St. Lqpls Republican says that GianRs friends are true as steal.

f A iusRfght a headlight on an ex- I prssst trai4 6 h i Fhyss Lqa,, Republican says that Ghnes frendsa ase true as steal. z Il Why isl mad bull an animal of con- Il vivial disposition Because he offers q horn to every one he meets.
 The Reveille says there IS a gentleman in Austin who is 80 noted for his reserved
 manners that nobody ever saw him dis fplay any.
 l Fhe Jspaneseyaloon keepers must do q llargs E@sdit hRinass. "A NTthampton bcosdty hAh4iss sohtractsd 5oshp S75. .Oo8 slates to Japan.
 4 A Southern bookbinder bound. up eighteen dime novels between Bible coy l CTS, and ( preaSh carried the book kseyen miles under his arm Ito read some con- soling passages to dying woman. t A. Chicago man has not been bothered Fly his wife to get:worsted for her since l the morning he appeared pleased to do the engaging young lady who tended the
 woHrsted coupffs5 TEkg FAF VEGA l h England they tal1how Sankey walked Tup to grenadier. and, taking him affec- .tionately by the belt, said, 'Young man, l I likewise am soldier-a soldier of heaven" "Old 'un, replied the grena- .dier, you're a long way from your bar racks, anyhow"
 Scene, 8 butchers stand. Butcher: ''Come, John, be lively! uow; break the bones in Mir. WlfIiams's chops and put MT. Smiths ribs In the basket for him ]" John (brisklY): "All right, sir; just as soon. as .I,xe -Aawed of Mrs. Murphy's legpH kKfNs.a sE sFs #k Z
 It'swonderful how rapidly some fowls reach smaturity.S Now for Instance, you may staft fioEn Ahe market with a spring chicken, but by the time you get it home and ready to eat it has taken upon itself all the characteristics and toughness of an ! eighteen-year-old rooster. "ag' <s 1 Preston man has been missing for three days, and as he was recently mar ried, grave doubts exist as to whether he IS sitting round in hay loft somewhere. meditating on the price of spring bonnets or has merely drowned himself. e. i Jerry Black chews up g paper of tobac. co every six hours. and expectorates copi- sously. A Harrisburg lawyer once said to him. takeI my advice.s Judge. and keep lcaway from Africa. If, Stanley ever met you there in the dark, he might mistake I you for one of the sources of the Nile"
 That gallant young soldier, Colonel 1 Fred Grant, is now en route for the plains He goes out we'll provided with cigars. champagne, mosquito nets, smelling salts, i and cushioned camp-stools, particularly I the latter, as he hears that the plains are l generally too damp to sit down on. 4i Senator .Christiancy,i is the. author. of the Mormon bill which is distressing Brigham Young so drsadfully. But Brigham has his revenge. Young Mrs Christiancy is liLe author of milliner bill that, when it I i, sent in. will make the venerable Senator I work for the defeat of his own measure l and introduce a resolution of condolence I with B. Young.w :s---.fa s'Plase, sur, ,swhat's the fare from Dub lin to Glasgowl" inquired son of the Emerald Isle one day of the clerk of shipping office. Eighteen shilling" re- piled the other. ''An what dye charge for pig or cow?" "Oh, Is. Cd. for a pig, and s. for cow" We'll" replied Pat, "book me as pig"
 Dara in says.the male grasshoppers use their hind legs to fiddler on the edges of Itheir wings, and that the best fiddler al- ways wins the affections of the ferale first. l The editors of the Norristown Herald aver that they have frequently. noticed this, but didn't think it worth while say ing anything about it.
 j. A writer in an agricultural paper claims that there is death in the dishcloth. they | 0pf hnv fn 'opo ot We never atea dlsclothss but we should think that if they were@soaked twenty four hours before boiling, and carefully scraped and drawn with butter before itplacing on the table, they would be every bit as healthy and palatable as tripe. A From ihsD Denbury News: HIf < IsoKThe first robin of the season is taking cod liver oil in Division street family. VI l <. Personal friends of the parsnip will be glad to learn that is an umbelliferous plant -..-.- e--g. e--s- ~s- er~ ~@-e-ss { There is no doubt that Blaine is the coming man. The question is, shall we wait for him !? 7asa 9 ifz f-'l s'e' '" -.e. r. Owing to the general stagnation of busi- ness, the Presidents salary is to be cut | down one-half.
 Every married women is personally &C., l quainted mitllIa man who will sit right l alongside of stove and let the fire go Font. saS@ O. e'17a a- 4'sfs ..- ~ I The oldest inhabtant of Branford, Conn, is dead. She was nearly hundred years old and connected with the alms-y Ehouse of course. 'A''A' '''A N'''N ~" k Forty-seven million pins made daily in tthe United States, and yet if man wants
 one he has to turn the house upside down
 to get it.
 The Amshesa Groeerssh6as mostoT is
 Count and weigh all you buy" states for the guidance of it's readers that there are 566, 900 beans in barrel.
 A tramp visiting Danbury, Friday, fell and broke one of his legs. He was taken to the.afmshpuse. Phe accident will pros bably lay him up for three >months-a ksther serious matter to him, as the sea- son is just opening.
 It was in Ringtown. Pa He was brush
 ing down cobwebs for his wife, when the
 broom knocked down gun, and the gun
 went off, as also did one half of his head. I When will men learn not to usurp the pre-
 'os$ttsssL ssssLo4TfWsn ot ~'iWtlssn TTAM MOTE
 A man in pair of borrowed overshoes
 shipped of the post office step this morn
 ing and fell on his back with such violance
 as to make him temporarily crosse eyed.
 When they helped him up he was determin-
 ei to sue the owner ofthe rubbers, but sub-
 sequently concluded. not to-. . I An susher one of the Danbury
 churches on observing gentleman come
 in with lady, whisppers to him:
 Married ?'' sa+~ l' S-A @"
 If the gentleman says yes,e the usher
 seats the two as he best can, even if it IS
 five rods apart. If the answer be in the j negative, he gets both of them in one pew
 even they have tos split some one in two to
 do it, e @A k.' P<t ~AF- h T'>A& A " S& >
 Mamma, said little Danbnry boy.