National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1876-04-24

Der 10 an English journal simply because he
run his knife down his throat while feeding
himself to potatoes they arose as one man,
and were on the point Of settling Richards
bacon when a second consideration caused
them to subside and forgive the. maynard
Enelishman: knowing these facts, and then
rejecting that there is(an American born citi-
zen in our midst who chews toothpick ten
hours cut Of twenty -four, and Occasionally
goes to bed with his toots on, il does \seem
as though criticism was n order and in very
coed taste. X ~
Now that the Cars daughter, the wife Of
the Duke Of Edinburg, has gone 70 her pa
rental roof, leaving the Duke in England, wild
rumors begin to wing their way through the
press of the world respecting the probability
OF serious rupture between Great Britain
aud Russia.
Central Park is becoming popular resort
for persons bent on committing suicide. They
repair to tRat beautiful city garden quite as
naturally as ducks to water. There is some
mysterious incentive to suicide about this
lovely spot which battles every attempt to
prevent the repulsiye occurrence. 1t may be
that these poor suicides wish to leave earth
from as enchanting scenes as possible, but
the probability is that they catch sight Of
some of the statuary there and Immediately
60 stark mad. .-.. .a. a.. D.
The scandal mongers do not reflect that
every revelation" about our public func-
tionaries is welcomed abroad as sure evi-
dence of the weakness and instability of the
American Republic. Corrupt men in Church
and State should be exposed and punished.
Honest men should be protected. The latter
are too rare to be wantonly injured by base
less rumors and insinuations. The man who
circulates 4 scandal in order to create sensa-
ton would steal the false teeth Of paupered
female and pawn them for q knife to stab his
old mother with. If any OF our knights OF
the three balls discover set of false teeth in
the possession of any one of the Detective
Press men they should refuse to barter or
traffic with him by all means.
|. The New York Tribune "Political Notes"
man gets of the following good thing: "The
Indiana Democratic platform starts of with
this yirtuous announcement: The civil service
made the object Of personal gain, and 1t is tie
| first duty which the people owe to themselves
anl the Government to restore the tests Of
honesty, capacity and fidelity in the selection
| Of persons to fill all pu0lic positions That
| means, Of course: sPut us Democrats In, and
| we will show you what a reformed civil service
is Well, they have been showing Us this
winter at Washington, and the result is seven
officers Of the House discharged for dishonesty
| or worse, and many more who ought to be. 1t
won't do, gentlemen. This is a dreadful un-
healthy year for claptrap."
| We have received q Communication from q
prominent Republican protesting against the
admission of Governor Chamberlain as de-
epate to Cincinnati, because of his dsre 3ula-
BILE antecedents. The writer very justly argues
that the man wLo first taught the South Gar
DINA Legislature how to sell their votes; WIZ
engaged in schemes of phlnder whereby hi
adopted State was robbed Of millions of dol
lars: who recommended the purchase of the no
to,ious he'll hole swamp-the abode of snake
and alligators-Ior sec, 900; who attempted b.
letter to BRIDE = member Of the South Carolin
supreme bench, and whose record generally I
as "scarlet," is no fit person to be admitted Il
seat in the Cincinnati convention. W,
therefore earnestly request that gentlemen
best acquainted with the adyenturer vii
make an earnest protest against his bein,
seated at Cincinnati, for the party could no
afford to carry so heavy load.
Indiana is the mother OF Hoosicrs, and an
interesting lot of these eeeentzic characters
she prodeces to amuse, edify and benefit thu
world. That portion of her body polite which
delights in the name Of Democracy has re.
Gently put forward one Of these characters 70,
Governor. The same is Jimmie Williams
gaunt, practical, superhuous old Jimmie, tn
veritable prototype Of honest Old Abe, who's
height exceeds his breadth by quite ninety pc
cent. of the whole man, and who never has
cold in his head, because It is so far from tn
ground that wet feet ueSer anect it. He
like Lincoln in more than lankness. He cal
tell good story. Once a minister who's
meetings he was attending with much interes
approached him and said, "Jimmie, wha
makes YOU SO thin?" and Jimmie, taking al
extra chew, replied, "I'm afraid am feedin!
the soul 70 the injury Of the body, if it's an,
Of your business, and then walked away, will
the intention of Draining the very next maj
that said thin.