The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1876-03-02
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS,

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
} What nation produces the most mar
liages, Fascination. Is #
When are eyes not syes' When the
wind makes them water. @ r
-Jewelry of oxidized metal Ii very
popular in Paris. 1t is also very ugly.
In polite society they are not called
Black Hills, but "colored elevations"
Little as Rhode Island is, she has to
stagger along under debt of 81, 1872 500.
The law against smoking on the
streets of Boston has never been repealed,
If A-r.k-a-n.s-a-s spells Arkansaw.
why does not h-a-n-d-s-a-w spell hand.
sas? : = -
Lavender says his wife Is ALWAYS
ready to tell her rage.-San Froneisco
Cal.
Ike Partington says that Winslow
only made a clerical error.-Sp1na6eld
Republican.
Wear patched trowsers if you must,
but keep your character whole, and 70
bravely ahead.
Plato says "a kind no is often more
agreeable than q rough yes" Let gen.
tlemen remember it this year.
"A prudent clergyman, unwilling to
accuse citizen of lying, said he used the
truth with penurious frugality. ~
TIL last New York murderer won't
plead insanity. He says he got mighty
mad" about it, and that will do.
Florida has reached point of sue
cess in fruit culture that enables her to
orange things for the whole nation.
1t is bad enough for a wife to have
ught shoes, but tight husband must hurt
ner soul the more.-Pomeroy's Democrat
Trapping on the frontier is said to be
unusually poor this winter. All kinds of
fur bearing animals are unusually scarce
= The practice of cooking food for
stock is said, by the Germantown Rele-
graph to be on the decline in Pennsyl-
vania.
"A philosopher being asked what was
the first thing necessary toward winning
the love OF woman, answered, IAN op-
portunity."
because no news is good news, says
the New York Commercial advertiser, it
doesn't follow that no newspaper is good
newspaper.
Among the January dividends de-
clared in Philadelphia we do not observe
any from the Kelley Motor Company
Buffalo Erpress.
Ibid you ever notice." said John
Henry, as something struck him violently
on the end of the nose, "that a ball Is
sometimes snow ball?"
The first fruits of leap year shine
forth in the case of Miss Belle Harper, of
Fairhaven, w. Va, who shot a man be-
cause he refused her offer of marriage.
-Tulle or blonde scarfs, which are
worn with bonnets, are made independent
~ OF the hat, and are pinned on the back
hair and tied under the chin before the hat
is put on.
"A Nashua, N. H., landlord failing to
get out some non paying tenants-a moth
er and three children-put hampers in
the chimney of the second story and actu-
ally smoked them out.
The Spanish papers are divided or
the question as to whether the navy Of
that country could whip the navy of this
country. Suppose they try it once. There's
nothing like knowing the truth.
Brooklyn is curious place. When
Mr.. johnson was found on the walk with
bullet-hOle in mis- head, the doctors be-
gan stomach pumping him out to see Il
he hadn't taken poison.-De,rost Fire.
Press.
When walking with a gentleman, 4
lady should take his right arm but in 8
crowded thoroughfare you may with pro
priety seize him by the collar, lappels OF
observation-disclosures is most convenient
for holding on.
Mrs. Partington attended an auction
sale Of household goods, but forgot hel
pocket-book. She remarked to Ike on
her return home that when she saw things
she needed put up for sale the unbid
ding tear would start"
1t is now generally believed that when
Boss Tweed went upstairs to see if there
was robber in the house, he inadvertent.
ly sat down upon a box of dynamite-be'
cause he is now being found all over the
country.-Norris:oon Herald.
"A Chicago millionaire, NJ. O. Wal
ker, died few months ago leaving will
that pleased nobody. Result-there has
been realized thus far from the estate
$35, ITO, OF which sec, 100 have gone ia
the lawyers and administrators.
"A young woman in Chicago put hel
teeth in glass of water at night, and in
the morning found them embedded in 9
chunk of solid ice. She was late al
breakfast, the process of thawing out the
teeth with bonfire of matches having
been slow.-HarJord Times.
The Albany Journal, commenting on
the habit of American magazine publish.
n 0$Sn
that some one of them adopt the master.
stroke of issuing all twelve numbers al
the beginning Of the year, properly dated,
and thus completely forestall all rivals.
"A young printer, having occasion,
the other day, to set up the wellknowu
line: 81
Slave, I have set my life upon casti
astonished the proot-reader with the fol.
lowing version:
Slave, 1 have set my wife upon caski
The vending of pencils, pens and other
articles by teachers in the public schools
is attracting attention and arousing pro.
tests in Boston. The practice interrupts
the lessons and abstracts the minds of the
pupils and is productive of no advantage
except pecuniary one to the teacher.
Canada rejoices in civil service re.
form over which the servants of the Gov
eminent do anything but rejoice. About
month ago the Premier abolished the
lunch hour and compelled the clerks ia
attend at their offices from ten to four,
whereupon they began taking their lunch.
cons with them and making coffee in the
Offices with gas stoves. This has pro.
voked another circular to the effect that
gas is not furnished by the Government
for cooking purposes. Cold tea now il
the only hope Of the Canadian department
clerks.
"A talented, but misanthropic young
man, sends us tender poem for publica-
ton, in which he "wafts to the West his
fond adieux." And we refieux to pub
lish his poem, because we do not chieux
to, and if he gives us any of his abieux, OF
sioux us for libel, we will ieux up the
soles of our shoes upon him, and amieu1
ourself by pounding his eye until it is oi
various hieux. Watt his s'adieux" through
the columns of the Haaok- Ere, will hei