The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1876-10-27
GRATE IND GAY.


1t is said that the ivory Of England
costs the lives Of fifty thousand elephants
every year
Grass that will make men and horses
drunk grows in both Asia and Africa.
Hence, perhaps the vulgar taking a
nip"
The cool, crisp mornings have at
last arrived, when we are al prepared
to exclaim, in the language of Henry
Clay: at is nicer to be abed than be
president"
A Husbands Rights Association" has
sprung up in England. it demands
impartiaiity and justice, and that wo-
men shall not have the privileges Of both
sexes and the abilities of neither.
"A country editor remarks: "Wo
have $4,000 clerymen, 6, 200 Journalists
and $4,000 domestic servants" Guess
he can stand it, provided he has no
mSther-in-law on the staff
"A baby recently christened at New
port wore 5000 worth Of diamonds aud
a robe that cost $4,000. Unless the poor
child has inherited some brains from its
grandparents its little head must be
wofully empty.
A gentleman, wishing, not long since
to-, to POP the question" took nR. tIio
answered by the young lady Sayyes,
pussy"
Says the Brooklyn Argus: "Many
a young lady from suffering blighted
affection and resolution TO die
at once, has been jerked from the brink
of the grave by reading the announce
ment of a fall opening"
Every New York daily paper gives
its readers directions rs to the prepara-
ton Of food for the tables If some
journal will only tell its readers now
how TO secure the food, there'll be a sub
scription for you
An eminent and witty prelate was
once asked if he did not think such q
one followed his conscience. Yes"
said the bishop. J think he follows it
as a man does a horse in a gig-he drives
it first"
A girl in Hackensack can see with
the top Of her head and tell what time it
is by a watch laid thereon. There used
to be am old woman in Belgium who
could smell with her right ear, and now
comes Adirondack Murray who can hear
with his mouth. He viii publish lis
"reminiscences under the title: What
the Keg Told Ne"
Ii is apt TO shake mans confidence
in his wife to awake in the early morn
ing and find her sitting on the edge Of
the bed going through his pockets
Fulton Time. And it Is apt 90 shake a
woman's confidence in her husband 70
find nothing in those pockets but n lager
beer check, a piece of bologna sausage,
variety show ticket, and pertumed note
signed " Ever yours Julia. 49, -Norf'sf0Vh
Herald.
The term "grass widow" is said TO
be a corruption OF grace widow the
former expression being merely a bar
barism. "Grace widow" is the term APP
plied to one who becomes a widow by
grace or favor. not Of necessity, as by
death. and originated in the early ages
of European civilization, when divorces
were granted but seldom and wholly by
the Catholic church. When such
ceirt stated S4auea ae grsvia5 wffch
is "widow Of grace" In the
law Of the French it would read, Veuye
de grace" or grace widow" " "veuye"
beine translated as widow"
When a Chicago girl received dis
match from Wisconsin announcing that
her lover was going or with consumP-
ton. she telegraphed 20 his friend 'sias
moor Jeffrey kept up his liie-insurance|
The friend telegraphed back Policy
for SO. 900 in your favor il paid up till
Nav Q. 1877. Poor Jeffrey can not last
after the cold snap" The young lady
then wondered philosophically how she
would look in black, and telegraphed to
Jeffrey: "Darling, ] will be with you
ON Tuesday, never to quit you during iie'
TrR1IvE." at viii be a sad los to you,
nav love- said her mother. Yes ma,
sobbed the girl, "but the loss is fully
covered by insurance Tribune.
Married next week, hear, eh y
remarked a friend, slapPing good young
man of Burlington in congratulatory
wav ON the shoulder. erich girl up
from Davenport, ] hear2' Well, no.
said the Young man, sitting a little sigh;
d" things was all arranged, but I've kind
o had to put the wedding OF little
while. like it might be-" WHATS
wrong ?'' asked the friend in sympathetic
tones " old folks down on the match 2
" Well. not exactly; ye see she has no
noronts and she's her own boss ike,
int Girl didn't throw you, did
she? Didn't go back on you = " Well
said the young man, hesitatingiy'
"n-no not exactly. Ye see, two OF her
husbands kind Of happened 10 hnd her
and come in on her together sort OF un-
ovnected like. and I've just sort Of
tboupht we'd kind Of put it OIL IKE "
r,;.bt bep And the subject Of conver-
sotion was delicately changed, Ike