The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1876-01-12
why He Did Not buy the Venus Of
Milo.

From the Boston Commercial Bulletin.]
Into one Of the large jewelry and fancy
goods stores of Boston walked, the ether
day, one of those customers that the hol-
iday season sometimes brings to town.
He was a hard-hande9, loose jointed,
broad.shouldered individual, carefully
dressed in new suit of baggy, ready.
made clothes, and 'home-laundried shirt
and hat which, although perfectly new,
was three seasons behind the present
fashion. Saunterlng up to one of the sales
men,with very obvious attempt at being
at home among the gl;ttering splendor Of
the salesroom and a general, air of mot
to be astonished or done by you Boston
fellers," he inquired, "Got any brunzes?''
The clerk answered in the affirmative, and
led the way to bewildering stock of
bronze statuettes, clocks, etc. The visi-
tor stared at them for moment as an.
interior African might have at the first
white man he had ever seen, and then
setting his hat little more firmly on his
head, asked "Which O. them fggcrs mout
be the Venus of high low -
The, trained . salesman. with
placid countenance. quietly replied.
Il do not remember any by that title
are you sure that was the name ?''' The
patron of the fine arts drew large, vel.
low silk handkerchief from his hat, and,
hopping his face uneasily, said: 1T
mout ha' beer, ace high. but think it
was high low ; Marian sed that ef thou't
Of seven.up / shouldn't =. forget,
the name. The fact isl said the puz-
zled purchaser, with sudden burst
of confidence Soap, I hev just put up a
new tenement down to South Higgins
boro, and Marian flowed she'd like 4
brunze in the keepin' room, suthin' like
what she once seed in cousin Sam. Stiff.
ners parlor on, Beacon street. Cousin
Sam che writ the meme. on card, n
p'raps I've got it now;'' and diving into
his breast pocket as If he was to un-,
sheath a two.handed sword, he lugged out
long pocket book, from the depths Of
which he plucked card and handed it to
the salesman. "Ah!' said the latter,
1.-THE Venus Of Milo. Yes, sir, here is a
fine copy; a reproduction by Barbidi-
enne. The customer surveyed it earn
nestly for moment, and then said I'VE
haint got perfect one. hev ye,
Cap? This ere one has lost both her
arms and got dents all over her back"
The patient salesman explained that the
statuette was-a copy of the original that
was found in that condition. "Shoh!''
commented the other, and then hesitat-
ingly, "don't any of them have any more
close'n that? This ere one night gown
pears to have kind Of slipped off on her.
Again the shopman, despite his twitching
muscles, explained to his attentive lis.
tener that it was an imitation of an an
Gent statue. He, however, cooking his
head on the side, inquired: "Wall, now,
what'n you tax fur her, jess as she
stands?" rapping his :;bony knuckles on
the bronze as it it were buzz
saw. One hundred and fifty dol.
lars for that size," said the clerk.
'Wha.a.t - almost shouted the astonish.
ed would-be patron of the arts; ga hun
dred'n fifty dollars fur a brunze gal
.thout any arms, and skearce rag to her
back Venus Of My Low! Venus Of Your
High. l should say. A hundred'n fifty
dollars! Why, that's half the mortgage
! on brother Jim's farm. Guess Marian
must have thought my name was William
B. Astor, instead of "John Higgins;;'' and
fixing his hat little firmer, he made q
hasty exit from the store, and struck a
straight line for the Eastern railroad sta
ton.
Mr.. Bancroft's ''History'' is pleasantly
summarized by the Chicago Tribune as
a dozen volumes in which the author