The Brookhaven ledger., 1876-10-19
OUR DESSERT.

Why do people cali for piece OF
string. and did anybody ever hear OF
one calling for whole one?
city Young man who read, Now is
the time for huskIng bees, chased
bee fifteen minutes to ascertain "h"'
kind of husk it mad on
George Washington 'inks, colorfa
barber. was up before the poiIce cout
Yesterday, for cutting down a ne'gh.
bor's apple trees. History will repeat
itself.
Ar Baacher thinks the wic|ledest
thing il the world is to thulnp chi'o
on the head. This is undoubtedly 'r""-
The best way to punish a child rs l."
pour hot beesway down its back.
A Newport girl had fall last week,
and injured herself SO severely that ah'
was carried home insenslblo. Upon re-
covering her first words addressed 10
her sister. were, "Mary, did 1 have en-
my striped stockings?'
"Whv. Ichabod, l thought you got
married morn a yeer ago. Wen,
aunt Jerush. 1t was talked Of, but /
found out the girl and All her folks were
opposed to it. and 80 just gave them
all the mitten and let the thing drop
Lately o mountain lion made IA q
on a ranchman's house IN LelF fihnu
Canon, Colorado He tore the iamiiE
dog to pieces He pulled the ha'lT-
strings ont of the family cat. lie finai
lv succumbed, however, to the lamlly
rife.
"steam is e great thing said a trav-
eler in a raliro%d car to gentleman
sitting by him. $50 1t is, was the
renIv II owe nv fortune to 1t.
oSionsieur is the manager Of a comra-
nvq'' "No." "An engineer perhaps?
NO. have lost number Il relatives
by railroad accidents
The party in the village store believ-
ed ur Darling when he said he rugged
a two-wheeled truck under n broken
backed SOW, 50 that she could get
round as well as before the accident;
but their confidence III his word was
shaken when he said that her next litter
of pigs was born with similar trucks
under them.
The field of Marathon belongs to p
practical gentleman named Soutz@s,
vino has drained it and cutivates corn
and grapes thereon. 1t produces an
abundant crop, dife2inging therein
from Bunker Hill, which ''c,ass ic
ground" Artemus Ward was informed,
was good enough for beans bat not
worth cuss for wheat
Judge Ito intelligent iuryman)-
"Wou4d you convict man on cIrcnm
stantial evidence?" Il dunno what that
is, Jedge." "Well, what do you think
it is?' "Well, 'corlin' to my jedge-
mcnt, sarcumstantial evidence is about
dis: Eff one man shoots anuder an
kills him, he orter be hung for it. Eff
he don't kill him, he orter go to the
plenipotentiary.
"Marry?" asked Louisville girl,
frantically, "did you ask me if | would
marry? You just let any young man
SAN marry to me, and I'll knock him
down in a minute and sit on him until
the preacher comes" And the young
man felt as if his nerves had all turned
to spider webs, and thought how
sweet it would be to be alone IN som
wild wood far away.
A Scottish professor in the Universe
" of Edinburg was experimenting be
fore his pupils with some combastlbIt
substances, when, as he was mixing
them, they exploded, shattering The
vial which he held into fragments He
held up Il small piece Of glass, and said
very eravely: "Gentemen, l have
made this experiment often with this
very same wal, and never knew 1t t(
break in my hands before"