The news and herald. [volume] (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1876-1881, 1876-11-16
the Body-Snatcher,"7

the Body-Snatcher.
The next newspaper article that
attracted my attention was tho fol-
lowing
"a SWEET CANp1pArE.-NIark
Twain, who was to make such
blighting speech at amass meeting
of the Independents last night,
didn't come to time! A telegram
from his physician stated that he
had been knocked down by n run
away team, had his leg broken in two
places sufferer lyingin great agony,
and SO forth, ,nd u lot moro bosh of
tho same sort. And the Indcpend-
cnts tried hard to swallow tho
wretched subtorfuge and pretended
that they did not know what was the
real reason of the absence of the
abandoned creature whom they de-
nominate their standard bearer. A
certain man was seen to reel into
Mr.. Twain's hotel last night, in Il
beastly state Of intoXcation. It is
the imperative duty of the indie
ponaonts to prove that this besottcd
brute was not Mark Twain himself.
We have them Mt last This is II
case that admits of no shirking.
The voice Of tho people demands in
thunder-tones: WHO is that man 2"
was incredible, absolutely,
incredible, for NJ m II t,
that it was really my name that was
coupled with this disgraccful suspi-
cion. Three long years had passed
over my head since 1 had tasted ulc,
beer, wine, or liquor of any kind.
1t shows what effect the times
were having on me, when. II say, that L
saw myselfconiidcntly dubbed, "AIr.
Delirium Tremons Twain" in the
next issue of that journal without a
pang-notwithstanding I knew that,
with monotonous fidelity, the paper
would go Oh calling me SO to tho
very end.
BY this time anonymous letters
were getting to be mn important
part of my mail matter. This form
was common:
"How about TINT old woman you
kikcd OF your premises which was
begging. "PoL PRY."
And this
"rhere is things which you have
done which is unbcllnowcns to any
body but me. You better trot oat
Il few dolls. to yours truly, or you'll
hear thro' the papers from
"HANpY Andy"
This is al ont the il o.. I co i'd Oh
tinuo thom until the reader WIS sur
lcitcd, if desirable.
Shortly the principal Republican
Journals "convictcd" me OF wholesale
bribery, and the leading Democratic
papc. S nailed an aggravated case of
blackmaiing to mc.
In this way l acquired two addi-
tional names Twain, the Filthy
Corruptionist,' and "Ywain, the
Loathsome Emhraccr."
by this time there had grown to
be such Il clnmor for an answer" to
the dreadful charges that were laid
| Jo me, Chet the elitors AMI leaders
Of my party said it would be politi-
cal rum fOr me to remain silent any
longer. AS if to make their appeal
the more imperative, the following
lppeueu i'll one Of the papers
tlc very next day:
"BEHoLD TIE MAN.-The Indc-
pendent candidate still maintains
silence. Because he tMrc not spe TX.
Every accusation against him has
boon amply proved, and they have
been indorscd and reindorsed by his
! own eloquent silence, till Mt this d,Ly
ne stands forever convicted. Look
upon your candidate, Independents !.
Look upon the Infamous Pcriuror
the Montana Thief! the Body
Snatchcr Contemplate your, linear
nate Delirinm Tremcns your FL
! thy Corruptionist your Loathsome
, Embraccr ! Gaze upon him we'll
ponder him well--and then say if
you can give your honest votes
to II creature who has earned this
dismal array of titles by his hidcous
crimes, and darcs not open his mouth
in denial Of any one of tn en- T.
There was no possible way of get
ting out Of it, and SO, in deer mumiIi-
alton, set about preparing to
answer n mass of baSelcss charr es
and mean and wicked Mlschoods.
But L never finished the task, for tho
very next morning paper came ont
with II new horror-a fresh molipni-
| ty and seriously charged me with
burning " lnnatic asylum with all it's
inmates, because it obstructcd the
view from my house This threw nc
into sort Of panic. Then came the
charge OF poisoning my uncle to get
ms property, with an imperative dc
mand that the grave should be
opened. This drove me to the
verge OF distraction. On the top of
tins l was accused of employing
ioothless and incompetent old rcln,
tlvcs to prepare tho food for the
foundling hospital where I was war-
\ en- was wavering-wavcring. And
ut last, rs due and fitting climax to
the Shameless persecution that par
ty rancor had inflicted upon me,
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