, 1876-12-06
SMILEK'S IlEALTu.LIFT.
WHY Ills Patients Were Angry at Him
Health and CscfulMeB4,

Health and Cscfulness-
Philadelphia Batie,tn. ...
They arc III the midst OF q big lawsuit In u
ncighl'orine village between p. smilcr aud
the rest Of the population Of the town. Tile
Doctor, 1t seems, had large tank placed on the
top OF his house, from which to supply TITS bath.
room, and 80 forth, with water: The water had
tern III the yatd, and the Duetor found it to be
pretty good-sikcl joh, which would cause him
constant expense. So, alter th!nIttng the mat
word "Sanitartunl'' oyer the door. Then hu
cutecalt4 thu pump nlaetinerr beneath the
floor, and he riggclup kind Of complicated mp
par,a1ttls with handles and u hingss ,' and eTank
machine Md pulling tue handle up and down,
would operate TINT pump
Then tho Doctor got out circulars and publish
ca auSertisenien.s about "Snl!lcr's Patent
Hca1tA-Ltit," !" and ho secured testimonials 1rom
q thousand OF 80 ot pcople who agreed that tho
lealth-ltlt was tho only hope for the physteal
salvation Of tue human race. Pretty soon pe-
ple bcgau to call 70 see about It, and smtler
set them to icrkin. tho handles. And when
customer hid pumped up fifty gallons Or 81,
emilcr wonld charge nlm o guartcr and tell him
that three months Of that Kind Of thing would
And he would push the project among his
patients. II man Naa bilious, or Ind tho
toothache, or WIS Inflicted With rheumatism, or
Group ar measles, or yellow fever, or cholera
morbus, sn'ller would turn him in a. the health
lift and get quarter each time. The thing be-
ca1ne 50 popular that he lad ta cnlATGe his tank
and l'ut ia smal ller pump; aud he not ouly got
all bis pumping dono for nothin.. but the pro-
pie who did It paid him nbout 81 so year for
the privilege. 1t began to look like Al unco.i-
monty soft thing, and everybody WIS contcnted
and happy.
Ons day, however, old Afr. Mngtnnis, who hal
hccn prarticlnG at tho health-litt every day for
n1nuths frffnr him Anif nf trIifpnEtinn.
jalnmcd the handles down little too iar,l, and
broke the board upon which he was standing.
As tho board gave way It plunged Afr. Mneinnls
into tlle cistern, anu just as hu waa sinking for
the third tine sncr t'shcl him out with "a
s ssSh IA Pa te1 y s eng S,Dsi Of oass o
G!nnfH said:
~ didn't know you ha'1 c'ste.n under TINT
aonr: What did you do that fort"
D "Wh1y' ,1}S' ss t. keep tho '' moist It's healthier
III looked to me as Il thcrs was some kind
plmp under tl1crc.n
10! "0h ~" ,al ~ Smsr, 'shose are ont, thu
h 'f ss aqss s :a pans Msfaa' sa te9 fass
one Wien ice it.''
10 a few days later Mac.nnss came around
with lut Of other patients and found the Doe
tor out: They determined TO- Investigate.
tases,l as ths i4ci. about tSst It pump Thcy cSoss:
examined Smtfer's serynnt girl, and learned
a.sout tho truth, and then they went home mad.
A consultation was lleld, At which every ltitnus
and rheumatic individual who had been working
talked about murder and sudden death. Final
II they resolved to prosecute Sniler for DAM
ages and obtaining money under false pretenscs.
i is thought by good Judges that BY the time
ateut the llnhcalthest lit for hItn he wss aver
interested III.