The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1876-07-24
Nasty.
He aud IHsaLeF GAVItt 10 20 In.
diana on u Political Mission
Tho Mistakes they made, and
the Dire Result.


trouble. | can't uBdeFItNnd why LII
should Be sich a conundrum; ] cant IN
dsstAnd why thIngs shooIdent 80 Of
with more perfect loOseniI and Al salle
gait. In short, Why shoodent eTerybOd!
except tho black RsPubllkins, hey pre-
ciAely wat they want, without all thi
tTOnble and PerpleIity 70 git 1t,
Peelih II 70 be my dOoiy TO do luGhil
in tho interest ~ "Tild6n and Reform,
I conclooded to spend 4 portion nv th'
money that John MOrisSey left With me
10 inhooenco voters In lower county IL
Iniseany; and, 10 do il efectooaiy,
nGde periec. prspaFRIhsn beforeh9nd and
made Iich arrangements sz wood result
in proper denomination Nv the soOpe
rloriIy az |Tildsn and Reform 0yei
HuyeS and Wheeler.
" he'd to do the speekin, intsndid j
10 b effective. WAntid that my work
ahood count for the COZ, and be seed thai
nhoOd result In glorious hsryest In No
Vember.
I hsy alluE notibed that 81 4 Speaker
kin be intercepted At the rite time, and 81
the TELLER wat interrupts happens to ask
n question on which the Speaker is per
fsCkIy POSLid, his prompt anser alllE puts
the qusstIoneF, or inlerruPter, to aile
and wins for the Speaker the aympathy Of
tho people. ! perposed 70 interdoose 4
new lee 10 StumpIn, by tAkln with me my
own fnterrupter, 90 that Good be sure
that the queries he Ehood put wood be
siah that Good properly anseF, and amer
with eiFeek.
/ solecIid e. the questions | wantid
asked me, these
Wat Il the amount NV tbs nAshnel debt!
II Linkin he'd bin detected, wood that
debt hev bin incurred?
WuE not the lhcurrin Nv the debt a
blessin, pertikerly eE it was incurred 10
give freedom TO 1000, 900 niggeTEl
IL It not the Wisest thing we kin do TO
git down to a gold basis. to.wunSH
IIadent the Western farmer ought to
swct and scald TO pay the debt TO tho
Eastern capitalist
writ the'e questions all down, and
arranged for the anAers. You see they
give me chance, ef Good heV en- asked
IN order, to give.thc Republicans sich a
hidin ez they never he'd. II give me an
opportunity to show, that the debt was
made In the interest NV Ablishnism; that,
Of the Republican party he'd never sue
ceedcd, there never wood hev bin no debt;
tina, to git back TO gold wood room every
body; and that the Eastern bondhOlder
wanted the WeAtern farmer to pay the
debt anyway.
decided 70 take IsSakCr Gavit :. with
me to net &C Republican intefrupter, and
he'd to git him up ez Republican. II
wuL n hard job-ihe hardest ever un-
dcrtook. To metAmorphoSe Cross.
Roads Democrat into n Republican il q
task that requires genius; but under.
took il and succeeded to Some extent. |
powdered his. note, he'd him shaved,
and put on him clean shirt. l made
Kim black his boots, heyin first furnished
him with a pair, and then | put on him .
decent SCOT Of close, and had him wear en-
about the corners awhile till no got used
to Gun and Good appear easy in EN-. Then
took him and coached him him in the
uucstions wantid him TO ask. he'd
him ropeat en- over and over agin till he
he'd EN- by heart, and told exactly
where In my speech wantid him to gil.
in with eech Oy EN-. repeated my
speech to him dozen times, and he'd him
interrupt me with his questions, or
rather the questions / he'd prepared for
him, and then l made the AnSers, and
instructed him in all tho minutia, even to
his hluahin when he sot down discom'
fitted.
rot him 80 we'll instructed that l ila.,
tered myself | Shood go through with a
wet sheet and flown sale, and ahood &c.
complish big work tor the party. |
LATED to think wat a good thing il wood
be to hey IsSakor dressed up ez Repub'
Iikin, with his nose powdered, and to hev
him ask me SIGH questions ez Good anser
-ukin en- OF a Republican, and me put
tin him to utter shame.
The ftist mite spoke / he'd itall arrang:
cd Issaker WuE to set in the awjenee, and
al the proper time, in all Nv witch he wuE
instructed, he wuz to commence, II wuz
a big mectin, the skoolhouSe WuE full,
and I hoped for great things.
Alars Tor human expectRshuns! l had
bin 80 biE1y drummin up the msetin thro
tho day that didn't watch Issaker, and
knew nothin Nv wat no Wuz dom till |
saw him in his place In the aWjence. l
commenced my speech, aud hedn't got de-
Gently into tho fntroduChsen-l think l
wuz dwellin onto the horrors Nv miSseg-
enashOn-=WhCn up no got. Great Heay..
ensl Ho wuE eE drunk eE billed owl, and
hedn't any more idUe Nv wat he Voc doin
than a 500 Injun. Risin to his feet, no
swayed around unhtedily, and remarked
that he he'd question to ask, In agony,
iorlI coodent help myself, Sc9 ASK it.
"EI a Republican said he
Tho nvience all lated, for they know.
cd by his nose that no wuE no Republic
"E1 a Republican, l want to know
whether debt which YnE incurred to
nominate Tilden, and bring about the
blessing NV a suthern Confederlsy, ouBh-
tent 10 be paid BY the bloated Democta-
Az nv Moo York, wich nominated Tuden
and paid the likIcr bills Nv the speeker
ON the platform, who owes me for more
than loar yeer's board aud never paid Tor
drink in his life onless 1t wlE mis-.
take, and wich brot mo here to interrupt
him, wich l swear l won't do onleSs he
~
"Sit down, you ideot," I yelled "and
don't interrupt me when l am discusSin
great constooshnel quesionsp
"Ideot yoorsClE," yelled Isaker, in a
drunken rage; al come here on yoor &C
count, and at yoor expense, to. play Re
publikin and interrupt you, and won't
lake no idCot from you or any o'heF
man" ,.
thro that awIence, and preciPetatid his
self onto me, and dragged me on thS
platform, aud Whaled me TIL thot he'd
gone thro the entire Rebellion. j he'd nc
idCe aiOrC ez 10 wat wuS' meant BY being
Whaled.
Nv course the meetin wu1 broken up
and the Rwjence dispersed in . row
lssAkor in his drunkenness went to the
nearest bar.room, and told en- all Nv our
arrangement, and before mornin he'd not
only spent the money he'd provided him
with, but he'd paWnsd tho close he'd
furnished him, and l found him in the
mornin mere wreck, 81
"Parson," EAid the inebriSted lupnt;e
~ don't suppose I lev bin nv mnei,
,Yoosc to the party, and heyn't fnr.hers5
tho coz To anV alRFnntn 49,. -. w