The Osceola times., 1876-07-01
FACTS AND PASCIEs


fault will never find one.
THERE are many recipes for getting
rid Of the currant worm, but there Is
nothing no sure in its results ~ 10 blind
fold him and back him under pile driver.
SOME one remarked about recent do
butante that her mouth was like rose
bud" "Oh do her justice" said Jones,
cher mouth is like a whole bush full Of
rose buds"
A WATERTowS girl addresses Mrs. A.
T. Stewart as aunty, and tells how sorry
rhe is about her poor dead uncle. About
$4,000 will do for her, and she tells
which Of the Watertown banks are the
safest.
Two ladies' contended for precedence
at the court u Charles v. They appealed
70 the monarch, who, like Solomon,
awarded, "Iet the elder 70 INST" Such
dispute was never known afterwards.
THE London World announces that
Capt. Burnaby, the central Asian lion of
the London salons, il about to start for
Africa in quest of Mr.. Stanley, who has
not been heard Of for over a year.
CONGRESSMAN THOMPSON, Of the
Gloucester, Mass, district remarked,
when he heard that the Old South
church in Boston had been sold, "that
II didn't do for the Aim m-mighty to
own a c-c-c-corner lot in B-B-B-Boston.
some people feel themselves Obliged at
this season TO get on the heated and
dusty railway and 20 off to some crowded
and generally uncomfortable watering
place. Happy the individual who can
afford to stay at home and keep cool.
The following is the population, accord
ing TO the last census, of the six largest
cities of Europe: London, 3,254, go;
Paris, 1,794,3S0; Constantinople, l,000,-
900: Berlin, S26,34l; Vienna, S25, 1876;
and st. Petersburg. 667 1926.
THERE is no fooling with life when 1t
is once turned forty; the seeking Of
fortune then is but q desperate after
game; it is a hundred to one II man
fling two skies and recover all, especially
If his hand be no luckier than mine.-
Cowkey.
A CHEEKY party by the name Of John
son proposes to coHdense Dickens novels
by rewriting them and cutting out
those parts which he-the cheeky party
named Johnson-thinks are not worth
reading We move to amend by con-
densing the cheeky party named johnson.
A gold pen is little thing,
But in thy poet hand
II can take life-it can take wing
Become magic wand,
More powerful, more wonderful
Than alchemy of old.
II can make minds all beautiful
Change all things into gold.
PAYsoN, on his dying bed, said 10 his
daughter, "You will avoid much pain
and anxiety il you will learn TO trust all
your concerns in Gods hands. Cast all
your care on him, for he careth for you
But il you merely go and say that you
cast your care upon him, you will come
away with the load on your shoulders"
THEY are experimenting in London
with gun which weighs eighteen tons,
throws ball weighing ono thousand ono
hundred and fifty pounds, and consumes
three hundred pounds OF powder at each
discharge. That gun would be dan
gerous thing 10 leave lying around loose
for childred to fool with.
A LAFAYETTE, Ind, man, with
mania for patents, invented a decapitator
and committed suicide with it. On the
sides of the machine were found written
the words: "For sale or rent. Hari-
kari. Patent applied for" The singu-
lar instrument is now on exhibition in
the cheerful warerooms of Lafayette
undertaken.
A CLERGYMAN who was invited to
preach before medical association re-
turned answer that he would do 30 from
the text: ain his disease Asa sought
not TO the Lord but TO the physicians;
and Asa slept with his fathers and died."
The time for the delivery of the sermon
has not yet been fixed.
A MEDICAL authority says that man
loses one per cent. Of vitality every
time he is suddenly walked from sleep.
This is what makes druggist look 30
pleasant when he is rung up at two
o'clock in the morning by fellow-citizen
who wants to know II he keeps postage
stamps, and who would like to buy one.
The Wesleyan Methodists have suf-
fered severely in the FIJI Islands from
the pldxue. ~ appcais iIohi e"S eo''
returns that the deaths this year among
church members amount to more than
eight thousand, while there are ten thou
sand less children in the Sunday-schocls,
and nearly forty thousand less attendants
on religious worship.
A PAIR of silver kcttle-drums, ham
mcred out Of sheet silver, and nine hun
dred and sixty ounces in weight, have
been presented to the Fifth Lancers,
British regiment. They are not destined
merely for show, for it is we'll known
that the "ring'' of silver has peculiar
quality in its sound, which renders II s'i-
perior to sheepskiu. Four other Eng
iish cavalry regiments possess silver
drums.
You can buy a cane fsh-pole for
twenty five cents, and catch just I"
many fish with it AZ you can with
iointed one that'costs seventeen dollars,
| but you can't take it apart and slip IT
under your coat when you 90 hshing
Sundays ss you can one that's IN sec
tions, and religious outside appearance
is worth sixteen dollars to seventy-hve
dollars to most men.
How THEY SMOKE IN GERMANY