Ottumwa weekly courier. (Ottumwa, Wapello County, Iowa) 1872-1899, 1876-05-10
n.,narknble suicide.

In 81. Louis OH Saturday night, a
man named Bernard Bailey, 33 years
Of are. committed suicide in his room
by Shooting himself through the
heart. lie was very intelligent, re-
spectacle gentleman, and held good
position. The moving cause in the
tragedy was disappointment in love.
He left the following remarkable let
ter:
TO The Public.
Would you like to know how a
man feels who is about to commit
suicide?
I'm the first place he must feel so
badly that, no matter what is TO come
hereafter, il is more endurablc than
the present: and secondly, he must
feel that, more endurablc or not, he
cannot help the act; that even if the
future is worse than the present, the
present is uncomfortable.
suppose that medical men would
like to know just the mental condi-
ton of one who can shuttle off this
mortal coil. II is this: My nerves
and senses are as sound as they ever
were. | can attend to business as
efficiently, and as fully realize that
the chief end of man is TO gather du-
cats, as ever could; but / can also
realize that without my better half
| am as perfect engine Without
stean,--useless.
Doctors of divinity would doubt
less like to know my moral status and
religious ideas. My moral idea is
this: That man should do his duty in
spite of obstacles and consequences ;
and that so doing is the only thing
which will bring the "peacc which
passeth all understanding" l ac-
knowledge that was too weak so to
do. In regard to Il future state, my
reason does not fully accept that there
is future state of which we will be
conscious. l believe in the immor-
tality Of the soul, or the life principle,
or whatever il is, as believe in the
Immortality of a bushel of coal, that
il may change its form so essentially
as to be unconscious that il ever cx-
listed before, but that still, as the coal,
il is not destroyed, but simply chang
es its form. My heart may speak diff
ferently to me, but even then, | be-
lievc that whatever is, is inevitable,
as it must proceed from the great
Original, and so must be in accord
ance with His will.
However. / shall probable knor
more about it in twenty-fonr hours
than all the ID. DIS living. am not
crazy. l know that the world is full
of good and enjoyable things, and
that they were put here for our good
and benefit, and that we should strive
and work to obtain them. But | am
unable to care for them without the
love of my darling. l wish to state
that Miss Knox is in no way rcspon-
sible for my having loved her; that
almost before she had ground for
thinking that my feelings towards
her were more tender than those OF
friendship, she informed me that her
heart was another's, and that while
she esteemed and cared for me as a
friend, could be nothing more to
her. But she was mistaken in that
and though could not convince her
of it while living, she will realize il
when "sleep the sleep that knows
no waking"
A sweet good night to all.
A separate paper reads as follows
II wish to be buried Just in the
clothes in which l die. Do not move
me from where am found, except tc
my grave.
BURY me in plain pine coffin,and
have me carried to my grave in one.
horse spring wagon, do not let tho
total cost of my burial exceed five
dollars. AS the last request of dy.
ing man. l conjurc you to respect
these instructions"
On the back of this last note wa:
Endorsed, Respect this" i'm a large
hand.