The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1876-02-11
Bancroft rr lisn''
three cent fare, punch in the pres
ence of the passeniare."

three cent fare, punch in the pres
ence of the passenjare.
Rev. Mir stood there,
full of concern, apparently, and
looked long at me; then he said:
"Mark, there is something about
this / cannot understand. Those
are about the same words you
said before; there does not seem
to be anything in them, and yet
they nearly break my heart when
you say them. Punch in the
how is it they go?''
/ began at the beginning and
repeated all the lines. My friends
face lighted with interest. He
said:
."What a captivating jingle it is!
1t is almost music. 1t flows along
so nicely. I have nearly caught
the rhymes myself. Say them
over just once more, and then I'll
have them. sure"
l said them over. Then Mr..
- said them. He made one
little mistake, which I corrected.
The next time and the next he
got them right. Now a great bur-
den seemed to tumble from my
shoulders. That torturing jingle
departed out of my brain, and
grateful sense of rest and peace
descended upon me. was light
hearted enough to sing, and l did
sing for half an hour, straight
along, as we went jogging home
ward. Then my freed tongue
found blessed speech again, and
the pent talk Of many a weary
hour began to gush and flow. 1t
flowed on and on, joyously, jubi-
lantly, until the fountain was
empty and dry. AS wrung my
friends hand at parting, l said:
Haven't we had royal good
time? But now 1 remember, you
haven't said a word for two hours.
Come, come, out with some
thingr'
The Rev. Mr. turned a lack
luster eye upon me, drew a deep
sigh, and said without animation,
without apparent consciousness
"Pnnch, brothers, punch with
care! Punch in the presence of the
passenjare"
A pang shot through me as 1
said to myself, "Poor fellow, poor
fellow he has got it now"
l did not see Mr.---for two
or three days after that. Then,
on Tuesday evening he staggered
into my presence and sank defect
edly into a seat. He was pale,
worn; he was a wreck. He lifted
his faded eyes to my face and
said:
'sAh, Mark, it was a ruinous
investment that l made in those
heartless rhymes. They have rid
den me like nightmare, day and
night, hour after hour, to this very
moment. Since l saw you l have
suffered the torrents of the lost.
Saturday evening l had a sudden
call, by telegraph, and took the
night train for Boston. The Oc
casion was the death of valued
old friend who had requested that
l should preach his funeral SER
mon. l took my seat in the cars
and set myself to framing the dis
course. But never got beyond
the opening paragraph; for then
the train started and the car
wheels began their 'clack- clack-
clack-clack! Observation-Disclosures
clackr and right away those obi
Gus rhymes fitted themselves to
that accompaniment. For an
hour sat there and seta syllable
of those rhymes to every separate
and distinct clack the car-wheels
made. Why, 1 was as tagged out,
then, as if l had been chopping
. wood all day. My skull was split
ting with headache. 1t seemed to
me that I must go mad if 1 sat
there any longer; so / undresse d
and went to bed. / stretched my
self out in my berth, and-well,
: you know what the result was.
; The thing went right along just
! the same. 'Clack-clack-clack, a
! blue trip slip, clack- clack-clack,
for an elght-cent fare; clack-clack-
I clack, a buff trip slip. clack-clack-
clack, for a six-cent fare, and so
on and so on, and so on-punch
: in the presence of the passenjare! =
Sleep? not single wink l was al.
: most a lunatic when l got to Bos-
q ton. Don't ask me about the fu.
J. neral. I did the best I could, but
y every solemen individual sentence
was meshed and tangled and WOW
J. en- in and out with Punch, broth
er, punch with care, punch in the
y presence of the passenjare? AnC
g the most distressing this was tina
n my delivery dropped into the I'm
/. dulating rythm of those pulsins
% rhemes, and I could actually catcl
) ahsentninded people noddins
d time to the swing of it with thel
r. stupid heads. And, Mark, yor
is may believe it or not, before
ID got through, the entire assembling,
r. were placidly b Dbblng their head
in solemn unison, mourners, IN
er dertakers, and all. The momen
id had finished, 1 fed to the ante
" room in a state bordering on fren
zy. OF course it would be m.
7 luck to find sorrowing and age,
n maiden aunt of the deceased there
20 who had arrived from Springgel
too late to get into the church
She began to sob and said:
y "'Oh, oh, he is gone, he is gone
:. and l did MT see him before h
~ diedp
De "'Yes, said, he is gone, he
,S gone-oh, will this suffering neN
~ er ceaser
u "'You loved him, then! Oh, 20
- too loved him.
~ "'Loyed him! Loved who?'
- "'Why, my poor George! m
: - poor nephewp
vs. "'Yes! oh-him! Yes-oh, We
u yes. Certalnly-certainly. Pune
p -punch-oh, this misery will XII
r me!
HS g