, 1876-09-16
The Editors Guests.

hand upholding his head,
His eyes on bis dusty old table, with different
documents spread:
There were thirty long pages from Howler,
with underlined capitals topped
And short dsqusiton from Growler, request.
Ing his newspaper stopped;
There were lyrics from Gusher the poet, con-
cerning sweet tiOw'rets and zephyrs,
And stray gem from Plodder, the farmer,
describing couple OF hcifers;
There were billets from beautiful maidens, and
bills from grocer or two,
And his best leader hitched to letter, which
inquired The wrote II, or whos
There were raptures OF praises from writers Of
the weakly mellifuous school,
And one Of his rivals last papers, informing
him he was a fool;
There were several long resolutions, with
names telling whom they were by,
.Canonizing some harmless old brother who
had done nothing worse than to die;
There were traps on that table to catch him,
and scrpents to sting and to smlte him;
There were gin enterprises to sell him, and
bitters attempting to bite him;
There were long staring "ads" " from the city,
and money with never one
Which added, Please give this insertion, and
send In your bill when you're doHei"
There were letters from organIzations--their
meetings, their wants, and their laws
Which said, "Can you print this announce.
men for the good of our glorious causey
There were tickets inviting his presence to
festivals, parties, and shows,
Wrapped In notes with "Please give us no.
tice" demurey slipped In at the close;
In short as his eye took the table, and nln DER
It's ink spattered trash,
There was nothing it did not encounter, cx.
cepting perhaps 1t was cash.
The Editor dreamily pondcrcd on several pom
derous things
On different lines Of action, and the pulling OF
different strings;
Upon some equivogal doings, and some un.
equivocal duns;
On how few Of his numeous patrons were qui.
euy prompt-paying ones;
ON friends who subscribed "juSt to help him."
aud wordy encouragement lent,
Aud had given him plenty Of counsel, but nev-
er had paid him a cent;
On vinegar, kind hearted people were feeding
him every hour,
Who saw not the work they wele doing, but
wondered that printers are sour"
On several intelligent LOwusmcn, whose kind
ness was so without stint
That they kept an eye ont on his business, and
told him what he should print;
On men who had rendered him favors, and new
er pushed forward their claims,
80 long as The paper was crowded with "locals"
containing their names;
On various other small matters, sufficient his
temper to roll,
And finely contrived to be making the blood
ofan editor boil;
And SO one may see that his feelings could
hardly be said to be smooth,
And he needed some pleasant occurrence his
ruttled emotions to soothe:
10 hnu IL , io' ~, Ou SuO ShtSshoHbi plOH
and reliable tread
And farmer invaded the sanctum, and these
are the words that he said:
Good.mornn', sir, Mr. Printer; how Is your
body to-day?
I'm glad you're to home; for you fellers Is
al'ays runEin' away.
Your paper last week want so spicy nor sharp
as the one week before;
But | s'pose when the campaign Ia opened,
you'll be whoopin' II up to 'em more.
That fefar that's printiR The Spsasher Ia goin,
for you perty smart;
And our folks said this mornin' at breakfast,
they thought he was ge,tin' the start.
But hushed em right up In minute, and said
agood word for you;
And told 'em that some one was sayiR', and
whoever twas it Is 80,
Thdoyou can't expect ;Snuch OF no one man,
nor blame him for4yhat ho don't know.
But, layin' aside pleasure for business, I've
brought you my little boy jim;
And thought 1 would see If you couldn't
make an editor outen OF him.
My family stock is increesin', while other
folks seem 10 run short.
I've got right smart Of family-irs one Of
the old fashioned sort;
There's lchabod, Isaac and Israel a.workln'
away on the arm-
They do bout as much as one good boy, and
make things go of ikea charm.
There's Moses and Aaron are ely ones, and
slip Ikea couple Of eels:
But they are tol'able steady in one thing
theyalays git round to their meals.
There's Peter is busy inventin' Though what
he lnvents can't see,)
And Joseph is studyin' medicIne--and both Of
'em boardin' with me.
There's Abmm and Albert Is married, each