The Cheyenne daily leader. [volume] (Cheyenne, Wyo.) 1870-1884, 1876-04-13
Wit N HUMOR.

When -hs sDells \ rat"
Engaging phDtograper-Just lock q
little pleased, Mss! Think Of inf
A gentlenan can probabiy marry any
Ladyo Of his ae4qaintanee-if he PLeases,
Little z rls believe in a man in the moon
young ladies believe in a man in the
honeymoon.
Have YOU heard my last song ?" asked
a music writer of a grua critic. Il hope
so" was the reply.
There is a sly fellow in Texas who has
laughed in his sleeve so much that it has
become ~threadbare.
BE jabbers !" says Pa. who was horn
Oh the last day of the year. " had l delayed
a bit, where would ! been ?"
A voice comes from Washington Terri
org. saying send us w.vesr" And a
Thousand unhappy Benedictsrespond Take
ours"
A physician writes. asking the renewal
Of a note. ami sayss 1--WE are in a horri-
BILE crisis there is not a sick man in the
district"
An auctioneer once advert 'sel a lot Of
chars which. he said, chad hsen used by
school children without backs"--louih's
Companion.
Silas Card was married the other day.
and on his wedding notices were the words
mo Cards. But he dosl't know what
might happen.
The married ladies of a Western city
have formed a. ome-home-hnsband Club
It is about four feet long, and has a brush
on the end of it.
A Connecticut man has chr;stenc1 his
easy to prefix Nitro if her temper resem-
bles her mothers.
An obituary notice in a Western paper
contained the touching intelligence that the
deceased " had accumulated a little money
and ten children"
An impairment fellow wants to know il
you ever sat down to to tea where SKINNED
milk was on the table without being asked.
"Do you take cream p
An Irishman having been told that the
price of bread had been lowered. exclaimed,
THAT is the first time l ever rejoiced at
the fall of my best friend"
A young lady who had lost. or miss-laid.
her beau. was advised To hang up her fd-
de-" She said the advice did great violence
to her heart-strings.
A young lady told an admirer the other
night that he was like her opera glass.
because" said she. l can draw you out,
see through you. and shut you up"
Sam. why don't you talk to your mas
ter and tell him to lay up treasure in
heaven p" WHATS de use of him laying
up treasures up darP He never see UNI
again.
You bachelors ought to be taxed" said
al ady to a ~resolute evader of the moose mat
rimonial. al agree with you perfectly.
ma'am." was the reply. bachelorism is GER
tainly a luxury"
Mrs. Darlington says she did not marry
her second husband because she loved the
size of her first husband. and could wear
out his old clothes.
An Idaho invalid was ordered by a physi-
clan to take three ounces of brandy a day.
and knowing that sixteen drachms make an
ounce, has patiently been taking forty eight
drinks a day ever since.
mo one would take you for what you
are" said an old-fashioned gentleman a day
or two ago to a would-be-dandy, who had
more hair thar brains. Why p asked Joe.
because they can't see your ears"
"Sam, did you see Mr.. Johnson. the new
overseerp" Yes. massa / met him down
by the cotton GIN" Hes a good looking
fellow isn't he p "well, massa, he talks
like a good looking man; he made . bow
OATS all he said"
We find the following item in an Illinois
paper: "Mr.-w who mas been in re.
tirement for o few weeks after marrying
and burying three sisters, came up smiling
to the altar again yesterday, having begun
on a new family"
1t is recorded of an old deacon. now dead
who used to lead the singing in a country
church, that finding the concluding WORD
Of q hymn Jacob had not sylables enough
to fill up the music properly. he ended il
thus: Ja-a-a-fol-de-riddle-cob
Two little girls were lately prattling
together anu one OF tneln stlu WekeeI
four servants. have got six horses. and lots
of carriages now what nave you got p
With quite as much pride the other an.
swered. "we've got a skunk under our
barn."
Mister, how do you sell sugar to-day p
"Only twenty cents a pound, sir" Cant
give it. I'll drink my coffee without sugar,
and kiss my wife for sweetening. Good
day sir" Good day. When you get
tired Of that kind of sweetening. please call
again" al will" He called the next day.
The champion baggage-smasher runs on
the West Wisconsin Railroad. When the
Eau Claire traveller reaches home with two
straps, a broken hinge and a handful Of
brass-headed tacks, he is thankful that a
part of his trunk is spared him. and that
the straps were not split into shoe strings
Milwaukee Sentinel.
At the earnest request" of several
young men, a Missouri paper publishes the
following bit of information: There ID
nothing so tends to shorten the lives Of old
people and to injure their health az the
practice of sitting up late. especially wintc,
evenings, and more especially when there