The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1876-01-26

Punch in the pres nee Of shc passsn5arc
A blue triy, slip for eight. cent fare'
buff srig slip for a six-cent rare,
A pink trip slip for 4 three ceph tSIc.
Punch In The presence Of the passcnJsfe'
CHORUS.
Pinch, brothers! punch with care
Punch In the presence OF the pdssehJ"e'
Icame across these jingling rhymes 10
newspaper little while ago, and reaa thsu
a coupIe of times. They took instant ahu
entire possession OF me. All throusn piS ain
Fast they went wal.Zing through NY eia'n,
and when at last rolled UP my paHkin
ao,,,d not Toll whether had eaten anything
~ M, mad carefully laid out my Gays
1rorI she day before-a thrilling tragedy In
AZ nove, which am writing. went to my
Nv ~ hepin nv deed of blood. took up my
z,en. hut all | could get il te say was
ssPuncb. in the presence OF the passenjare.'
fought hard for an hour, but it was useless.
NV head kept hummipg ." A blue trip sip
for an eigbt.cent fare; butt trn slip ior a
six-cent fare"; and so on and so on VIVID
out peace or respite. The days work was
ruined. could see that plainly enough;
7 rave up and drifted down LOWE, anu
presently discovered that my feet were
teepipg time to that relentless Jingle. When
I could stand it no longer, l altered my
stem. But 1t did no good; those rhymes
accommodated themselves to the new step
and went op harassing me Just as before.
returned home and suffered all the alter
noon: suffered all through an unconscious
and unrefreshipg dinner; suffered, and cried,
and singled all through the evening; went
to bed and rolled, tossed, and jingled right
along the same as ever; got up atmidnignt
frantic, and tried to read, but there was
nothing visible on the whirling page except
"Punch punch in the presence OF the pas
/
mind, and everybody marvelied and was DIS
tressed at the idolic burden of my rawlings:
NPunch oh, punch! punch in the presence
OF the passepjare!"
Two DAYS later, on Saturday morning, L
arose, a tottering wreck, and went forth TO
fulfil on engagement with valued FRIEND, the
Rev. Mr.. -, to walk to the TalcOtt Tower,
ten miles distant. He stared at me, but
asked no questions. Wesarted. Me. -
talked. talked, talked. as is his wont. said
nothing; l heard nothing. At the end OF
mile, Mr.. -- said:
"Mark, are you sick2 never saw man
look so haggard, and worn, and absent
minded. Say something, dol"
Drearily, without enthusiasm, I said !:
HPunch, brothers, punch with care1 Punch
in the presence of the passeriarel"
My friend eyed me blankIy, looked per-
picked, then said:
III do not think get your drift, Marx
There does not seem TO be any relevancy IN
what YOU have said, certainly nothing sad
and vet maybe it was the way you SAID tht
words-I never heard anything that sounded
SO pathetic. What is D.
But heard no more. / was already faI
away with my pitiless, heart-breakiDg blue
trip slip for an eght.cent fare, buff trip sliE
for six.cent fare, pink trip slip for three
cent fare; punch in the presence of passeh
iare." / do not know what occurred during
den Mr.. - laid his hand on my shoulder
and shouted:
"Oh, wake up! wake up. wake up: Dom
sleep all day /! Here we are at the Tower
man I have talked myself deaf, and dumb
and blind, and never got q response. Jus,
look at this magnificent autumn landscape
Look at i, look at it! Feast your eyes or
It'll You bave travelled; you have seen
boosted landscapes elsewhere. Come, now,
deliver an honest opinion. What do you say
to this -
sighed YEARLY, and murmured:
"a buff trip slip for six cent fare, punch
in the presence of the passeDJire!"
Rev. MIR. - stood there, very grave, fus
of concern apparently, ana looked iopS a'
me. Then he said
"Mark, there Is something about this thai
/ cannot understand. Those are about the
same words you said before. There does
not seem to be anything in them, and ye
they nearly break my heart when you say
them. Punch in tbe-how Is it they go1"
began at the beginning and repeated OIL
the lines. My friends face lighted Will
interest. He said: , r
1.Wby, what a captivating jingle 1t Is! l
is almost music. Ii flows along so nicely.
have nearly caught the rhymes myself. SAY
them over just once more, and then LII nave
them sure"
/ said them over. Then Mr.. --- sale
them. He made one little mistake, which
corrected. The next time and the next n'
got them right. Now great burden seeme'
to tumble from my shoulders. That tortur
ing Jingle departed out of my brain, and
grateful sense of rest and peace descended
npon me. / was light-hearted enough t
sing: and did sing for half an hour, straigh
along. as we went jogging homeward
Then NV freed tongue found blessed speect
again, and the pent talk Of many wear.
hour began to gush and flow. ltfl1wed OIL
and on, joy ously, jubilantly, until the foun
tain was empty and dry. AS wrung m.
friends hand al parting, l said:
"Haven't we had a royal good time: Blu
now remember you haven't said wore
for two hours. Come, come, out With some
thingi"
The Rev. Mr. - turned lack.lustre ey
upon me, drew u deep sigh, and said, with
out animation, without apparent conscious
ness:
"Punch, brothers, punch with care
Punch in the presence of the pssseDjlre !"
A pang shot through me as l said to my
self, "Poor fellow poor fellow he has 60
.itnowi"
did not soc Mr.. --- for two or thre
days after that. Then, on Tuesday evening
he staggered into my presence and sank de.
iectedy into ! seat He was pale, worn la
was wreck. He lifted his faded eyes to 10.
face and said:
"Ab, Marx, it was ruinous inyestmen
that made in those heartless rhymes. They
have ridden me like nightmare, day an(
night, hour after hour, to this very moment
Since saw you have suffered the torment
of the lost Saturday evening had sudder
call by telegraph, and took the night train
for Boston. The occasion was the death o
ayaiued old friend. who had requested tina
should preach his funeral sermon. / tool
my seat in the cars and set myself TO framing
the discourse. But never got beyond tht
opening paragraph; for then the train started
and the car-w heels began their & clack. clack
clack-cack! .elack ,cisck claek. claekI' anG
right away those odious rhymes fitteC
themselves TO that accompaniment. For ar
hour sat there and set = syllable of those
rhymes tosyegy separateaod distinct cisak the
car.whees made. Why, / was as tagged OH,
then as If l had been ehopping wood all day.
My skull was splitting with headache. 1T
sl-k III