Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1876-12-01
Denver's Boy Philosopher
st. Louis Republican.

| 81 LOUIS ItepHDnCuH
a Denver boy Of about the usual
bad-boy age, but uncommonly inge
NOUS in mischief, has accidentally
developed a theory which is offered
as rational explanation of the phe-
nomenal mcat-showers that are said
to occur in some sections of this
wonderful country. Modern showers
of meat ere as marvellous as the an
cient ram of mama in the wilder
ness, wherewith the chosen people
were fed, but if the Denver incident
be accepted as accounting tor them,
there is a very small modicum of
miracle left in these exceptional oc-
currences. But to the Denver boys
experiment. His indulgent father
promised if he would quit the socle-
ty Of some young freebooters who
had nightly carousals in neighbor-
ing vacant lot and stay at home like
a good boy, he would buy him dog
wherewith he could be morally anus
ed in the domestic door-yurd. There
were his little sister and the house
hold cat for his game, and he could
have lots of fun teasing them. The
boy agreed to the proposition and
the dog came. 1t was Il mean look
ing dog, small, with q long, bushy
tail-which tail had a cowardly fash
ion of getting between his legs and
coming out in front and tickling his
nose i'll moments of fear. The dog
had no courage to worry the cat or
tease the sister, and it looked like a
total failure. But the boy was in
genious. He imagined that if be
could manage to keep the dogs tail
erect he would be as brave as any
other dog, and he might getsome fun
out of him yet. lie tried his moth
er's pearl starch but this did not an
swer. He tried various other eXpe-
dients, but all proved futile. The
dogs tail would 90 between his legs
at the first hint of danger, and there
was no fight or fun in him. 1t was
evidently the tails fault. One day
a peddlcr came along with large lot
of toy balloons. A bright idea
struck the boy. The old folks were
away from home, and since he had
quit the freebooters and betaken
himself to innocent domestic joys,
he had no pocket money. But his
enterprise dld not fail him in this
extremity. The balloons he must
have, and he traded a sufficient
amount Of the home personal Prop
erty to buy the epcdd!er's whole stock.
To make the balloon attachments to
the dogs tail was but the work Of a
few moments. The dogappeared to
get lighter-hearted, and even seemed
amused at the preparations. The
whole balloon power being applied,
the tail behaved splendidly, and the
boy hissed his regenerated dog Oh to
bigger one that happened to be
passing the gate, fully expecting to
have an interesting fight. At the
first jump the little dog rose in the
air and sailed away out OF reach
The parents came on the scene just
in time to see the dog disappearing
IN the far blue ether. The Denver
boy lost his dog, and may return to
the society OF freebooters, but the lit
tie incident will explain a wonderful
shower of meat that is bound to oc
cur somewhere out in Colorado, oil
the adjacent territories. The ingen
ious youth told the whole story OF
his trading with the peddler for the
balloons, and escaped punishment or
the ground of the aud and comfort
he had given to scientific research
The father thought of Franklin fly
ing his kite to catch the lightning
He saw his promising son flying :
dog to make Il shower of meat, and
mercifully spared the boy. But tho
balloon power did bring the dogs
tail into an elevated position, which
was to be demonstrated.