Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1876-07-14
II Y N @ II

Jney0re having great goose hunting now O
Long Island,' said Mr.. Magruder. in til
boarding house, last night.
'Are ihey?' said Mr.. Maguffin. IL neye
had much luck shooting geese.''
81 suppose not1 said Magruder. CON
passionately; snot much used to fire arm
hey? never read about geese but what
thlnkof days sport 1 had down on Shin
necook Bay, one day last year. The gees
we've flying very thick, and I took my Y
gun, and"
Your V gun % interrupted Mr.. Ma
guffin ''what is V gun ?o
"You will learn further on in the para
tIon," answered Magruder, continuing hi
story-''and went down there. One morn
ing we saw coming up from the Soutf
WhatI suppose was the biggest flock o.
geese that ever flew. They came along il
their usual way, flying in a triangle, with
the leader on the point toward us. [ col
fisherman to help hold the V gun, and
took aim and let her go. The charge just
cleaned both wings off the leader, and then
spread out like V. and-I am afraid you
Will scarcely believe me, Mr.. Mag uffin, but
1t just went down the inside Of each line of
birds and carried away their inner wings
as though they had been chopped off with
Ratchet. Losing their balance from hav-
ing only one wing apiece, they were thrown
violently together by the continued flap
ping OF the outside wings. Every bird was
killed by the shock of the collision, and
they fell to the earth in a. line that meas.
ured 49l feet. There were just 800 birds ::
4O4 pairs, and the old head goose that was
the leader''
"Your speaking of long-necked crea-
tures." said Mr.. Maguffie, calmly, "re
minds me of my giraffe hunt in South At
RIGA. Great sport, giraffe hunting. We
had one hunter who was such fast run
ner that he would often get clear ahead of
the party and catch giraffe all by himself.
Then he'd take couple Of turns of tile
glraffe's neck around a tree and hold him
until we came up. One day was out alone
and l came across two tremendous giraffes
together away from the woods. sneaked
up behind them, grabbed them by their
necks, and tied 'em together by their necks
and there L had 'em.''
Perhaps you'll kindly tell u.s." said Mr..
Magruder, chow you got hold of their
heads.77
WHAT You don't'mean to tell me,
Mr.. Magruder, that you don't know how
they hunt giraffes? Why, ignorant loon
giraffe hunters always wear stills pm. |
Y. San. g..
HE MEANT WELL.-There is an old |
gentleman that comes down town on foot
every morning, who appears to be a great
friend to dumb animals. Whenever he sees
dog scratching at store door to be let
in he promptly opens it for the animal |
The other morning he made q mistake in |
the dog business. He let one in, and soon |
the same canine came rushing between his |
legs, nearly throwing him down, and COW
ering the lower part of his pantaloons with |
paint. A man with Overalls on was chas-
ing the dog, trying to get a line shot at |
him with paint brush he had in his hand.
The old gentleman eXpostulated with the
irate painter for such he proved to he,
saying: "My good man, why do you wish
to hurt that dog p
s'Because he has tipped over my paint
and made an Internal mess Of everything.
Some blasted old idiot let him into the
store when we were trying to keep him
out while was doing some painting; he
jumped through the door, stuck his fore
legs into the paint-pot, and tipped it over.
Brown paint on marble floor looks we'll;
don't it2 / wish people would mind their
o,r,,, h,,cpaocI3,- Roctoa, Than cna.iaaf |
A Danbury mans horse banking, and
refusing to bulge, he adopted the inge-
NOUS device once employed by a canal
captain. He built small fire under the
animal. AS soon as the horse felt the heat
he moved at once. He advanced sufici-
emily to bring the carriage over the flames,
and there he paused to the editication of a
crowd of observing citizens and to the
GREAT satisfaction of himself. The. fire was
auenched without the aid of the depart
ment
4sMiss Smith. does a cormorant eat
strawberries?" Law mel no, child. What
mt that into your head?" "Cause ma
told Sarah not to bring out the straw
berries and cream until that old cormor-
ant Miss Smith. had left" About teR | +,
minutes afterwards, that child and his t
mother went up into the attic.
Now is the time for lovers to get spooney
ever ice cream, she taking few pretty
.labs at his vanilla, and he borrowing a
taste of her chocolate. This process in-
snires confidence in the day when they will
be throwing corn beef and cabbage across
the table.
Fannie Foo Foo was Japanese girl,
The child of the great Tycoon, il
She wore her head bald, and her clothes
were made
Half petticoat, half pantaloon; "
Her face was the color of lemon-peel, =
And the shape ola tablespoon. b
This is the kind of weather that makes
a man wish either that Adam hadn't been a
so successful as a backslider, or that some
patriot would invent pair of linen trou-
sere that button On around the neck and
have arm holes.
An obIiging Mississippi judge recently s
adjourned court for fifteen minutes to get
time to 60 out and pummel an offending
lawyer, who had rudely made application
for nice eye.
DR.. Wander Weyde says first-rate arti- A
Gle of jelly can be made from old boots. IL
And almost any printing Office can furnish :
enough old boots to make a barrel OF that
sort of jelly. 81