The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1876-05-12
Centennial Liars.

One Of the peculiar outcomes 81 the
Centennial period, says the New York
Herald, has been the passion il has
awakened for all sorts of old trash.
First of all every body wanted to get
copies Of old newspapers antedating
the Declaration of Independence, so
they contained a scrap of reference to
the struggle brewing or opened in
America. Then the passion arose for
autographs Of George Washington,
Thomas jefferson, Patrick Henry, John
Hancock, or any one prominent or
otherwise in the Revolution. Then came
the mania for old chairs that Washing
ton sat upon. There arc at least ten
thousand Of these in existence. so that
up 10 few weeks back there was no
difficulty in meeting the patriotic de-
mand. Then came the omnivorous
craving for any thing century old that
was in any way attached TO the father
Of his country-old pots, old crooks,
old hats, old boots. Any thing that was
musty enough to look a century old was
fastened on by the patriots as relics of
Washington.
All this patriotic fervor has led to
lameDtable results. People who have
always had the reputation of being
truthful and honorable citizens have
fallen into habits of lying shameful to
contemplate. Such one finds in the
attic an old dust-cOvered cooked hat
that had been used years ago in ANA
teur theatricals. He says to himself,
:" Washington may have worn such
hatn Then he tells his friends that
Washington actually did wear it. The
hat is put under a glass case, and
Brown and Jones and Robinson become
the dupes of Smith; but Smith re-
prOaches himself inwardly that he is a
liar in this centenary Of American hide
pendence. The Centennial deceit does
not end here. Jones, Brown and Rob
inson heap up hecatombs OF falsehood
about their ancestors who shivered
with Washington at Valley vorge, by
Jovei- or 'cheered for the
great Jehovah and the Con-
tinental Congress with Ethan
Allen at Ticonderoga. by thunder" or,
at least, ''held Lafayette's horse when
he was going to see the surrender of
CORVALLIS If this were the limit of
the deception il would not be SO dread
Smith have called forth n Nemesis of
merceaary counterfeiters who prey upon
them and a Centennial-mad society.
The counterfeiting of the newspapers of
a century ago has taken alarming pro-
portions. The reproductions are so
like the originals that it would be diff
cult 10 say which l. which-same old
type. same paper, same yellow age-tint,
same torn edges. same dogs ears. The
Washington Old Chair Mandatory
keeps six reliable workmen employed
painting &C. W.. 1776," on the seats;
six steady old women are engaged col
Letting cobwebs 10 he laid upon the
choicer specimens. and a dozen silent
but sturdy fellows TO toll night and day
kicking the otherwise completed spuri-
Gus old chairs round a musty cellar TO
give them appropriate mildew. dints
and cracks. The Centennial Autograph
Works are also very busy turning out
faded letters from all the Revolutionary
patriots. In a secluded part Of the
State, where the revival has not reach
ed. twenty-five aged spinsters-the re-
mains of . sewinc-bee Of godlier times
and young pastor-are stitching upon
spurious quilted petticoats Of Martha
Washington, unmindful of the wrath to
come. We would, therefore, caution
the people against the dangers besetting
their souls and would advise them,
whatever tremendous yarns they spin
about their Revolutionary forefathers
or their relics, not TO believe the stories
that others tell in the same direction,
and to smile respectfully, but irritat-
ingly, at the Revolutionary bric-a-5rdc;
not TO invest even paper-money in old
papers, old chairs, old letters, old hats
or Martha Washington potticoats, or if
they have already bought them to stow
them ANONYMOUSLY away until another
century Of the Republic has given them
that much genuine antiquity.