Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1876-01-19
Odds and FL


jewelry, and as much money! -. IS
them. l"
"SMA1n MERCIEs First
gler with empty reeD-s's v A.
had pleasant day. What a9.YN97
pursuit it is" Second dii!:M
ditto)--Glorious slant f.
nible we had just after lunch l .as
I ive!" Both-s' All l"-PuaaS
THE use of the Cachemer, D
was first introduced in Paris by.
Greek, the wife of Frenchmte
was very beautiful, and was the =
for several seasons. Her exquisii
Illness enhanced the beauty of ii
ment, and all the grand danes W
themselves in what, to-day, is cal
India cancels hair shawl.
THEY do some things better in F
vide the following neat way of p,
it, from a Partisan paper: .sThe
cess de M. is about to retire
society for little while, and is bu
edgings, insertions, muslins, and 81
which she is making up into little
ments, too large for a doll and
small for herself.
IT is affirmed by a statistician,
whose competency thus to affirm we KIN
nothing, that of the 1900, 100000
habitants of the globe more than 1,ON
COO,OO0 use tobacco in one shape
another. And three hunlre yea,
ago nobody bat the American Indian
knew anything about it.
"DEAR DEARl"-Ancient Maiden
"What is the price of beef to-day, Mr..
Frost ?" Butcher Fifteen pence
pound, Miss p Ancient Maiden.
teen pence pound / Why, you are a
dear butcher!' Butoher...W1hy-eh-
yes-thank you, Miss; that's jest what
Mrs. Frost used to say before I mar
ried her !'-Lo,aoona Fun.
A MAN recently purchased some corn
at one OF our groceries and took it home.
He soon returned anc said he could not
pop it, showing the clerk some dried
and blackened kernels as the result of
his efforts. "Och!'' said the clerk,
Milasian, ''there is nothing the matter
with the corn it is good, but the fire
was too hotl''- Utica Herald.
A QUEER phase of the export question
appears in the fact that the retailers in
England are distributing among their
Lady patrons in private houses pamphlets
and circulars with extracts from various
American newspapers, showing the
growing extent of the export of Ameri-
can domestics, and their absolute su-
periority in quality and cheapness to
the English production.
FoNTENELLE was very fond of salmon.
He was dining out one cay in Paris
when very pretentious guest at the
table, upon hearing the author ask for a
second plateful, exclaimed: "Oh, no,
M. Fontenelle, didn't know philos-
ophers liked good things so much ?"
IS Probably" was the philosophical re-
ply, the gentleman is under the i'm
preston that God made good things
only for FOOLS"
Mr. JOHN BRoUaHAM, happening to
be seated by the side of Coroner Con
merry, OF New York, and feeling thirsty,
said to that gentleman, "What will you
drink?" "a little claret," responded
his friend. "Claret p exclaimed Mr..
Brougham; "Claret for a Coroner!
Why, there's no body in that!
a CHINESE cook, with a butchers
Ratchet as sharp as razor, will, in ten
seconds, thoroughly lone and skin
fish, SO that not a particle is wasted.
He will give you an unbroken orange
full of ten different kinds of jeilies. A
Chinese acrobat is the only man who
can fall from trapeze plump on the
top of his head and laugh at you.
HE sat in a railway car. His head
was thickly covered with mass of red
hair. Behind him In seat sat man
with hardly any hair on his head. He
said to him ct guess you wasn't
around when they dealt out hair"
"Oh, yes, l was" replied the bald
head, " but they offered me lot of red
hair, and I told them to throw it into
the ash-bin. Po,sshkeepsie Eagle.
SOMEBODY having asked Mrs. Jerushy
Dusenberry, of Cincinnati, why wo-
man always wants man, when he is
sick, to take off his shirt downwards
instead of over his head, that NATION
proceeds to explain as follows: "Just
because she is sensible and kind heart
ed, and wants him to do it the very
easiest way. ]. do think, of all the silly
sights in nature it is man a-throwin'
his arms about in the air, a-strugglin
with shirt to get it off, when one little
movement downwards would bring it
OFF as slick as the skin of an eel. But
them is some Of his insensible ways,
and it our duty to correct them if we
can, especially when he is sick
LOUISVILLE has been amused by q
row in fashionable boarding house A
boarder refused to either pay his bill or
go away until the month for which he
had bargained had expired. The land
lady was told by the lawyers that the
money was not legally due until the
end Of the month, and That she must
fulfill her part of the contract before
she could sue him. She next took the
case into her owr hands. put damp
sheets upon his bed, fed him on the
poorest of viands. and put whining
puppy in the room next to his. he
etreated after three days Of endurance.