The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1876-06-29
Too Sad Not to be True.

YESTERDAY Master Bilderback was
home all day, confined to the house
and barn by the rain, and excited by
the prospect of unlimited fun during
the long vacation. He was blessing
| to his mother and sister, and his affec-
tionate parent caught her death of cold
by running around after him in one
stocking foot, searching out the tender
places in his nature and anatomy with
a four and a half slipper. He tied one
end of his sisters ball of crochet-cot-
ton to the hy-wheel of the sewing-ma-
chine and the other around the tail of
the cat, and by the time, his mother
had sewed half way down one Of the
long seams in Mr., Bilderback' 5 new
night-shirt, all but few yards of that
cotton was a chaotic mass about that
Hy-wheel and shaft, and the cat was
Waltzing in and out Of the kitchen,
sprawling along backward, tail straight
us poker, fur up and eyes alame,
Snarliilg and splitting and swearing like
mad, and Mrs. Bilderback and her
daughter ascended the table and
Shrieked till the windows ratified. While
Master Bilderback hid behind the
ClutheS-hOrse in the kitchen, lay down
on his back and laughed Il wicked, gur-
Cling kind of a laugh. Then he went
out and jammed a potato into the nose
of the chain pump, and the hired girl
went out and pumped till her arms
ached clear down to her heels, and
then told Mrs. Bilderback the cistern
had sprunk a leak and was dry aS a
bone. And then Mrs. Bilderback. de-
claring she knew better, went out and
turned the wheel till her head swan,
and she gave up, and Miss BiIderback
went out and turned TN she cried, and
then Master Bnderback, rather Unan
90 to the 'neighbor's for water, went
out and fixed the pump, and came III
to be praised, and was duly praised
with the slipper. for he had been
watched He put an old last year S
fire-cracker in the h,,han l1nvp
and insured a steady run of
strange visitors for about two
hours, to the great maZement of
his mother and sister, by pinning
placard on the porch step, plainly seen
from the street, but invisible from
the front door: Man wanted, to
drive carriage: $500 Il month and
board Mrs Bilderback drew II sigh
of relief when she heard Mr. b. 5 step
in the hall, and informed her son that
as soon as his father came in he should
he duly informed of all that had been
going on. There was most impress
sive silence followed this remark, and
the trio in the sitting-room listened to
Nh. Bilderback's S heavy breathing as
he divested himself of his wet booS
and prepared to assume his slippers.
Master BiIderback's face wore an eX-
preston of the deepest concern.
Suddenly the silence was broken by
a shout of aStoniShment and terror.
followed by Il howl of intense agony
and there was Gathering as of a run
away crockery wagon in the hall. The
affrighted family rushed to the door
and beheld Mr.. Bilderback cleaving the
shadows with wild gestures and frantic
gyrations. "Take it off, he shouted;
and made grab at his own foot, but,
missing it, went on with his war dance.
"Waterr he shrieked, and started up
stairs, three at step, and turning,
came back in a single stride, "Oh. Tn
stabbed.' he cried, and sank to the
floor and held his right leg high above
his head; then he rose to his feet with
a bound and screamed for the boot
jack, and held his foot out toward his
terrified family. "Oh, bring me the
arnica" he yelled, and with one des-
pairing effort he reached his slipper and
got it off, and with a groan as deep as
a well and hollow as a drum, sank into
a chair and ,cEsped his foet in both
hands. "Look out for the scorpion,
he whispered hoarsely, I'm dead
man."
Master Bilderback was by this time
out in the wood-shed, rolling in the
kindling in an ecstacy of glee, and
pausing from time to time to explain
to the son of neighhor, who had
dropped in to see if there was any in
nocent sport going Oh in which he could
share, "Oh, Bill, Bill" he said, "you
wouldn't believe; some time to-day,
some how or other, a big blue wasp got
into the old mans slipper, and when he
come home and put it on-oh, Bill, you
donstknowr'r .r@ ~mvsy yr
And the only mystery about that
saddened household is, how that boy
knew there was Il wasp in that slipper.
/ huntington Ha1ok-Eye.
/ The trustees of certain school
hear Norwich, being i'll want of a