The tribune. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1874-1876, 1876-03-29
Membranous Group.
A SKETCH BY MARK TWAIN =

"Well," said McWIlliams, "to 20
back to where was before 1 digressed
to explain to you how that frightful and
incurable disease, membrauous Group,
was ravaging the town and driving all
mothers mad with terror, called Mrs.
McWijliams' attention to little Penelope,
and said
"Darling, wouldn't let that child
be chewing that pine stick if were
you"
"Precious, where's the harm in it p"
said she. but at the same time preparing
to take away the stick, for women can
not receive even the most palpably Judi
clous suggestion without arguing it
that is, married women.
Glove, it is notorious that pine is
the least nutritious wood that child can
eat"
My wife's hand paused, in the act of
taking the stick, and returned it to her
lap. She bridled perceptibly, and said
You know you do. Doctors all say that
the turpentine in pine wood is good for
weak back and the kidneys"
"Ah was under misarprehension,
I did not know that the childs kidneys
and spine were affected, and that the
family physician had recommended -
" Who said that tho child's spine and
kidneys were affected?"
Ny love, you intimated it"
The idea! l never intimated any
thing of the kind"
Why, my dear, it hasn't been two
minutes since you said
" Bother what said I don't care
what did say. There isn't any harm in
the child's chewing bit of pine stick
if she wants to, and you know it per.
fectly well. And she shall chew it, too |!
So there, now !"
''Say no more, my dear. I now see
the force of your reasoning, and will
go and order two or three cords of the
best Pine wood to-day. No child of
mine shall want while T.
"Oh, please 60 along TO your Office
and let me have some peace. A body
can never make tho simplest remark but
you must take it up and go to arguing
and arguing aud arguing, till you don't
know what you are talking about, and
you never do"
every well, it shall be as you say.
But there is a want of logic in your last
remark which -
However, she was gone with flourish
before could finish, and had taken the
child with her. That nightat dinner she
confronted me with tace as white as a
sheet.
"Oh, Mortimer, there's another
Little George Gordon is taken"
Membranous croup2"
"Membranous Group"
"Is there any hope for him 2"
"None in the wide world. Oh, what
Is to become of us2"
By-and-bye our nurse brought in our
Penelope to say goodnight and offer the
customary prayer q, the mothers knee.
In the midst of "Now lay me down to
sleep, she gave slight cough. My
wife fell back like one stricken with
death. But the next moment she was
up and running way with the activeness
which terror inspires.
She commanded that the child's crib
be removed from the nursery to our
bedroom; and she went along to see the
order executed. She took me with her,
of course. We got matters arranged
with speed. A cot bed was put in my
wife's dressing-room for the nurse. But
now Mrs. MoWilliams said we were too
far away from the other baby, and what
If he were to have the symptoms in the
highland she blanched again, poor
thing.
We then restored the crib. and the
nurse to the nursery, and put up a
bed Tor ourselves in q room adjoining.
Presently, however, Mrs. McWilliams
said, suppose the baby should catch it
from Penelope9 This thought struck q
new panic to her heart. and the tribe of
us couldn't get the crib out of the nur-
sery again fast enough to satisfy my wife,
though she assisted in her own person
and well nigh pulled the crib to pieces
in her frant G hurry.
We moved down stairs, but there was
no place to stow the nurse, and Mrs.
MoWilliams said the nurses experience
would be an inestimable help. So we
were turned, bag and baggage, to our
own bedrooms once more, and felt q