The Findlay Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Hancock County, Ohio) 1870-1881, 1876-08-04
Swimming a Hammock


residence hereabouts, was sweltering
under the oppressive influence of the
heated term, a few weeks ago, and try
ing to read a newspaper. He came
across an item which assured him that
there was always comfortable breeze
under shady trees, and that ham,
mock swung under the trees, was de-
lightfully cool place to rest and refresh
ones self during the heat of the day.
there were the shady trees, and the
leaves rustling on the branches assured
him that a delicious breeze was stirring
them. If The hammock We're only
there. Our friend is II man of action
and also of expedients. He had no
hammock, and It was too warm to 90
down town and buy one. He conclud
ed he could fix it, and he did. He
searched the clothes chest and found
sheet that had done service, and he
found stout cord He tied two cor
ners of the sheet together, and then
made the cord fast to the tree; then he
tied the other corners together and
made the cord fast to the tree, and
folded his arms, and gazed at the re-
suit with ali air of triumph. When he
had triumphed sufficiently he placed
his hand upon the hammock and bore
down upon it in order to test its
strength. About the time he had his
weight suspended on his arm the ham
mock took IA lurch leeward, and he lay
extended on the grass in picturesque
if not graceful attitude, while the
hammock swung back and forth like
patent fan. He raised himself eau.
tiously. picking up n sprig or two as he
did SO, and looked around to SEE il he
could find some more. He didn'C look
as if he we wanted to find some more,
however. Then he concluded be
would get into his hammock and enjoy
the pleasant breeze, and contemplate
the beauties of nature through the
rnal.foliage. He.got one of his pedal
eXtremities into the hammock and took
hold of the cord to swing himself in,
but he pushed little too hard with
the foot that was ''on deck, "and as he
went in On one side, the hammock went
out on the other, and there was a
sound as if a heavy body had come
down unexpectedly upon the grass
He was resolute, however, and deter
mined TO mount that hammock ''if it
took all summer" There was fire in
his eve, and desperation in his mood,
rs lie took hold of it with both hands
and swayed it back and forth to ''get
its measure" Then he watched his
opportunity and jumped - jumped
right into the center of it, and there
he stayed, for a seam gave way in the
middle and a large portion of his anat-
omy protruded through, and seemed to
be a part of the hammock. Ills head
and his feet were in pretty close rela-
tionship, but the rent was not big
enough to let him all through, nor small
enough to prevent embarrassment
Just then Maj. came along, and seeing
the strange object swaying to and fro
under the trees, began to get mad and
low his teeth. Then he barked, and
m lde as il he would take hold of that
a ,atomy, when terrified voice in tones
of thunder sang out ''Get ont. Mail'
We don't blame ilIe dog for getting
scared, for the yell Was 50 irisi:i al that
neighbors rushed to the door to see
what was the matter And UeHi, Cedj,
Uinci-they came, they saw, they con-
quered the difficulty, and released our
much hamIDocked friend. II. didn't
undertake to explain the situation,-
thought, perhaps, it explained itself,
but ~ he caught sight of our reporter,
who happened to be among the crowd,
he muttered something about ''fu
neral" and the JEFF"
p. s. The hammock was taken
down the next day, and our friend be-
came SO delicate that by the advice of
his family physician he has gone to
Middle Bass, or some other seaport to
spend the summer. We take adyan-
tage of his absence to give particulars,
and if he comes back improved i'll
health, will not be in when he calls.