The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1876-08-24
COSFEDRIT y ROADS.
WtCHIs ~ THE STATE Nv KENTUCKY.

CONFEDRIT y ROADS. !
WtCHIs N TIE STATE wv KENTUCKY,
August 7th, $50.
There WIZ wunst a doctor wIch he'd
bslk Wish wood either physie or
puke, sccoldin ez he stript off the tree
up or down.
Like to this doctor is TiIden and
HenGix. Reed their letters up and
they re hard money physic-reed EN-
down and they are soft money
vomkk.
The day I got back from the st.
Look Con7enshun 1 conImenst pre-.
pariI for astumpin tOOr for our gal
lent Jtandard-barers. borrowed an
extrf shirt, so thst I Good hev one /;
I borrowed 3 valise TO kerry it in
wha 1 WuZn't speakin, and also TO
givemestandin atsieh hotels, eZ the
Committee didn't become responsible
for ny board, and Bascom completed
my .ravelin outfit by contributin q
quat bottle NV the newest, to be ker-
riedin the valise to be yOOsed when
in Bkalities where the nessariss Nv
life Vuz bard to come at.
f; 1 eoOdent go out instructin Nv
the IeOple till knowd wat my can
did;les bleeved in, 1 decided to wait
till got their letters Nv acceptance.
Didthst lIkker stay In the valise
Not any, 1t wuz all gone the fust
day,and ! went 70 BascOm with the
empO bottle the next mOFuin.
hF'A Hup, q. w." sed /. "I cant
go til heT seen them letters"
"When will they come ?" Rskt he.
"F'-dsy or Tomorrow" sed !.
"YOO shOOd hev kept wat 700 he'd
till the letters came" said he.
"sascOm," wuZ the response, "lik-
keI like yOOrs cannot be kept"
and then seem trouble ahead / con-
tiIyOOd
"Promise me that 700 will keep
this bottle filled till them letters
come. It will be but q little while,
and remember, Bsscom, yOO got the
si00 that Tilden, the RefOrmer, paid
for my vote at st. Loois."
81 promise :" he groaned.
"And likewise, until hev read en-
and unCerstOOd em, so that shell not
go out and spout false Dimocrisy."
''I promise !'' he groaned agin.
Day ater day passed but no letters
came. But promptly every mornin I
wuZ 81 BaseOm's with that bottle,
which he grosninly filled. On the
thIrtieih day he refOosed pint blank"
"G. W." sed I, sternly, "remember
yOOr pDmise. l may be called any
mint. 1t wuZ the foolish vir-
gins wat had no lie in ther lamps.
am I'D foolish virgin. Fill up the
lamp fer may be called tO-nite."
Andh fillen it, becOZ he he'd prom
ised.
But every mOrnin he wood lift mp
his vOiee sz come in, and howl,
"Graslns hevens ! aint them letters
never Omin To relieve me NV this in
cnbus %
At hst one mOrnin the letters
Come, IA the Louisville papers, and
BascOm come over to me happy, eZ
though a great wait had bin lifted off
him.
81 fIthe bottle for the last time"
sed he gaily, "fOr 10 here be the let
ters."
I-tOOK the papers and red the let
ters, aUi the next mOrnin VIZ prompt
ly at liz bar with the bottle.
"fillit ~ remarkt camly.
"NOtany," sed he. ''YOO hev the
letters.n
"GeGge Washington B,D ] replied,
'yO0r promise wuz to keep this bot
lie fillel not only till I he'd red the
'etters, but till L understood em.
lev BIZ applyin my intellek to EN-
or ten hours, and ef L know from
hem lttters whether L am to talk
Hard money or Soft, Immejiet Re-
or PerpetOOal Postpone
nent, hope never to be Postmaster"
e
Wat did that perfijus wretch do ?
He teleEraphed that very day to both
rilden and Hendrix, ez foIlers
"SheI Nasty, on the stump, advocate
Hard msney or SOft9 AnseU to wunst. I'M
,ortant, to save an innosent DlmOcrat from
OOin."
And the ansers come prompt;
FROM TILDEN.
"{5ssl Saoney, NV course, but soften Ii a
ioon uea1 IN The West. Strike boldly, how
Tet, y, - lI5 p5it,iIi, "nd agin the Corruption
w tle teepuDllkin party. TILDEN.
FROM HENDRIX
"sioft money, NV course, but harden it n
ood deal In the East. Strike boldly, how
ver, for Reform, and agln the COrrupshen
4 the HepuDlikin party. HENDRIX.
And so, hevin my instrukshens,
iad To go. shel, however, before
peek, get instrukshens from John
dOrrissey and Fernsndy Wood, ez TO
he best methods Nv brigin about Re-
Orm, and NV fightin cOrrupshen in
matters.
PETROLEUM V. Massey,
(which Nnnfs To he posfmaafarA i