Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1876-03-23
in my power with dates and circumstances to

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| Let me say that l am the child of noble
mother, and of noble father, and inherit
| those qualities from them-nOt to my own
| credit whatsoever What have received
am, and was brought up in an austerc NOR
ality, and in pure and
! uNBLEMlsHED HOUSEHOLD,
with most reverent love for truth, for duty,
for love. And to me has been given a nature
| that, whether it be prudent or whether 1t be
not, am not questioned nor questionable,
but when they rebuke the vine for throwing
out tendrils, and holding on to anything that
| is next to il, whether it be homely or hand
some, whether it be dry or full of sap-when
you shall find a heart to rebuke climbing
morning glory or any other plant that holds
on to that which is next to it-you may re-
buke me for misplaced confidence; you may
rebuke me for loving where should not love.
1t is not my choice; it is my necessity. And
| have loved on the right and left, here and
there, and it is my Joy that to-day am not
ashamed of it. am glad of it. and if had
my life to live over again, and were to choose
| between a cold caution, calculating every
step, without trust and confidence in man,
would, with all its liabilities choose to be gen.
erous, to be magnanimous, and to be trustful,
! and to lean, though some one should step
| aside and let me fall to the ground. And let
me say further, that I was brought up in a
household where the name of woman was
only next to the name of saint, and with good
reason always thought it should stand there.
THE MEMORY OF MY MOTHER
has been to me what the Virgin Mary has been
| to a devotee of the Roman Church. She has
been part and parcel of my lfe-a star whose
| parallax could not take, but nevertheless,
| shining from afar, she has been the light that
! lit me easier into the thought of the invisible
presence of the divine. My sisters l need
not speak Of. My associations have been
with women who have left upon my mind an
indeible impression of honor, of reverence,
and of affection, and all that l have gone
through, and all that have suffered at the
hands of those that are of another school,
has not changed, nor in the slightest degree
blurred the sense that have of the dignity,
and the sacredness, and the beauty Of woman
hood. And when l have stood upon the
! threshold of what seemed to me-knoWing
| the secret elements that were in it, and how
| cloud no bigger than mans hand might
roll up and cover the whole heaven-when |
have stood and looked out upon what might
come, what misery might be, l have said,
and God knows the sincerity and the depth
of it, ut is better for me, if it be possible,
it is better for me to stand and be misunder-
stood, than that there should be suffering
over so wide circle" as | believed there
would be. And that there have been
50 MANY HEARTACHEs,
that there have been so many whose faces l
never saw that have been bathed in tears,
that there has been even the eclipse Of faith
| that has been mentioned in many, only shows
how much would have been saved to human
ity if it had been possible that that policy of
suffocating domestic trouble and keeping it
in the origin had been carried out and honor
ably observed. The fire that is at first only
SO much that you can stamp it out may, by
tanning winds and reckless hands, be spread
beyond your reach, and the whole city de-
luged with fames-the whole prairie be
sheeted with fire that which in its beg ginning
might seem quite manageable. 1t seems to
me policy not only, but duty, to suppress and
! bursts out will know no bounds and no term
ination. The endeavor do not regret the
i'll success of it l do. But having gone through
all, my only question is now, that is,
MY ONLY DEEPEST QUESTION,
is, Has it wrenched you from the foundation
of true manhood? Do you believe in God?
Do you trust in the Lord Jesus Christ? Do
you live by the communications Of the Holy
Ghost? Is the higher part of your nature in
yourselves in commerce with God? look
| hating? Has it made you Jealous? Has it
| made you misanthropist or misoginist?
| Are you sound-sound in your chest, sound
| in your heart? Are you q man? Do you
love men? Do you trust men? Do you honor
women? Do you trust them? Are you will
ling to labor for them? Are you willing to
suffer for them? think may say without
any fear believe do live in the spirit Of
God and very near to Him, and in regard to
my feelings toward mankind there does not
live the man on the face of the earth that l
would harm if had him in my power. There
is not that human creature-1 know it-there
is not that human creature that lives that l
would not rather help than hurt. There is
not that creature that lives for whom l would
not bear moderate portion of suffering it
could save him from greater suffering. l
have tried to live in the spirit of Christ, who
wrought our JOY by His sorrow, who saved
us by sacrificing Himself. have endeavor-
ed to SO live And now, let me say further
than this, that while l make these assevera-
tions of my intent, and while l mean to con-
vey in the strongest language my conscious
ness of innocence and rectitude and honor
and purity, do not mean to say that have
always been wise, and still less to advise An.
other to attempt to walk the path that have
walked, or that have always kept my tenn
per, or that l have always restrained my
tongue. These, which will not call infirm-
tiles, if you please to call them wrongs or
sins-name them yourselves and | will still
excel you in condemning in myself anything
that has been less than the straight line of
sweetness and of meekness and Of gentleness.
lido CONDEMN MYSELF
often that am rash-that in any overhead
l say things ought not to have said-and