The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1876-01-05
Rates of Advertising.

an old gentleman rowing in a boat
near Kingston, and asked him what
business be bad in II.
business, sil, business, replied the
old gentleman. Do you know, cir,
that this is my pleasure boatY
Exactly, says Foote; and how
can you have any business in a plea
sure boat p"
"a good tale is told Of Curran, an
other witty Englishman, who was
once engaged in legal argument;
behind him stood his colleague, man
whose person was remarkably tall and
slender, and who intended to be a
minister. The judge observed that
the case under discussion involved n
question-o ecclesiastical law. Then,
said Curran. 4 can refer your lordship
to high authority behind me, who
was once intended for the church,
though in my opinion filter for tho
steeple.'
"Another was Charles Young, who
was great practical joker. A good
tale illustrative of this is The follow
ing: Young meeting a friend in
busy London thoroughfare, told him,
among other things, that be was going
to have tripe supper, upon which bis
friend stated that be detested tripe.
Young then said, in a very loud voice,
Not like tripel Dc you mean to OBJ
serve, sir, that you don't like tripeT
His poor friend, seeing crowd at,
tracted by such loud and unusual con-
versation, begged him to be quiet.
But be continued the more, and tho
friend took to his heels--Y oung crying
out to the crowd, There goes the man
that don't like tripe."
Two old plowmen down East we're
once telling tough stories Of their ex-
ploits in breaking up new ground.
"Up to Dixmont," said ore, twenty
seven years ago this spring, / was plow-
| ing in stump ground with a team Of
nine pair of cattle for Sol. Cunning
ham; we we're going along, making
not very smooth work among the rocks
and stumps. Well, one day the point
of the pillow struck against e sunk
stump four feet through, splititsquare
across the heart. and ] was following
the plow through, when the thought
passed through my mind that the
| pesky stump might snap together and
pinch my toes, SO just gfipped the
plow handles firm, swung my feet up
out o. the way, and the stump sprung
back and catched the slack of my
pantsloons. That brought everything
UP standing Well, / tightened my
hold. and Sim Swithin, he and Sol was
drivin', they spoke to the cattle, and
we snaked that stump right out by
the roots, and it had awful long
ones" at mup1Ih,ave been strainin'
on your suspenders," said the other,
"My wife knit them," was the reply.
| Verify France is wonderful coun-
try. With all the incubus of heavy
war expenditures resting upon her,she
cleared off her Indebtedness to Germa-
ny with such case and rapidity as to
make Bismarck regret he had not
asked for mora. And this has been
done without gripping her resources.
| Now the Minister of France informs
the Assembly and the world that the
revenue since the commencement Of
the present year, is S22, 600, 900 in ex-
cess of the estimates. The financial
vitality of France is simply without
precedent.
Louisville Courier-Journal; More
work forR. G. White. The expires
sion, "Egerything is lovely and the
goose hangs high" is corruption Of
} the saying, "Everything is lovely aid
the goose honks high" The honk is
, the note sounded by the wild goose in
its flights, and is abodt the only mutie
ia which that graceful bird indulges.
The meaningless word "hangs" should
, be Immediately eliminated from this
, beautiful and popular description of
the situation.
Mr.. Bergh thinks that the New
! York slaughterers are unnecessarily
cruel in the operation Of killing their
= hogs. Why don't they put them un-
der the influence Of laughing gas, and
then, when hog returns 10 conscious
ness, he will find that during his
! ecstatic insensibility he has been neat
ly cut up into sides, shoulders, and
hams, salted and packed away, and
is already booked for tour on the
continent
/ On one block in the western part OF
: Detroit, says the Free Press, there arc
eight ladies who won't 60 to church on
, Sunday because ninth lady. has an
India shawl and they have not. And
: the lady,who has it won't 60 because
e there Ia no ehance for her to show OF