Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1876-08-16
Visiting-Htnts to Guests and Hosts.

There are three essentials, says "H.
H. in a recent article which must be
understood and acted on before vi
sits and visiting will ever fulfil the
ideal OF the pleasure they ought to be
and to give. First, nothing must be
done for parade or show. No matter
now rich man may be, If he sets on
his dinner-table one thing, either to be
eaten or to be looked at, simply for
show, il is a challenge and an offense
OF course, nobody is so absurd as To
maintain that the rich must make din
ners of herbs because the poor cannot
afford stalled oxen. A very feast of
good things both for the eye and the
palate, can be set out without any at
tempt at or any suggestion of mere pa
rade, mere display.
There are plenty of ways in which a
man may advertise his wealth, il he
likes, without doing it in his hospital
ity. To do it there, or even seem to
do il there, is the very essence of yul
garity and real inhOspitality. To avoid
by every possible device and by the
utmost tact the bare suggestion that
the guest is the recipient and not the
cOnferer of favOrs is the first principle
of entertainment. To ask a man to
your house and treat him as If he were
inspector of wines or taX-gatherer on
silver Is a piece of very coarse stupl-
dity, and To make a grand difference
between the way you live when you
are alone, and the way you live when
you have friends under your roof is
surely a very direct way of injuriDg
ones own personal standard of taste.
The second essential of the ideal vi
sit and visiting is, that the host, not
the guest, set the limit of the visit.
There Is so very false notion IN this
country on this point that 1t almost
seems as if it must spring ont of ma
tional lack of directness and sincerity.
Every body knows, when he asks a
friend to his house, how long he wants
him to stay. There may be.fifty reasons
combining to make him very glad of a
visit three days long, and very much
inconvenienced by one longer. Honest
people ought To find no difficulty in
saying this. and honest people take no
offense at hearing it. This does away
with all possibility of miscOnstrnction
on either side, with all uncertainties as
to welcome, with all fears of intrusion.
A third essential of ideal visiting is,
that there be on the part of the host no
strained effort to entertain or amuse
the guest on the part of the guest TO
expectation of being amused or enter
tanned. Simply to meet for the inter-
change of goodwill and cOrdiality, the
usual current of life going on undis-
turbed, the habits of the family re-
manning unchanged-tha is the true
social visit. The man who knows how
to drop in of an evening, draw his
chair up TO our hearth as If it were his
own, and fall into the usual evening
routine of the household as if he were
a member of it-hOw welcome he al
ways is the man who comes To stay
under your roof for a season, and who
without being intrusive or familiar.
makes you feel that he is lat home"
with you, and is content in his usual
fashion of occUpation-how delightful
a guest he is And the house-ah how
few of them Into which one can go
for day or a week and feel sure that
the family routine is in no wise altered,
the family comfort is no wise lessened,
but, on the contrary increased by his
presence-what JOY is 1t to cross their
thresholds What good harbOrs of re-
fuge they are to weary wanderersi
When the world mends its ways IN
these regards, when these essentials
are fulfilled, the lost art of conversa-
tion will revive; hospitality will be
worthy of the name; and householding
and housekeeping become, as they
ought to be, the greatest pleasure a
man can have.