davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

He was very small boy, all in tatters,
and his clothes were dripping. In his
arms he held a miserable little dog, aud
both boy and dog were shivering in the
cold January weather. This is about
what he told me: "You see Mister,
Bill Bostwick and me was playing by
the river, betting cents on the chunks
of ice, seeing which one would go
first over the dam, when this 'ere little
dog came trotting past. Says Bill to
me-says he: Let's have this 'ere dog
for passenger So we took him and
put him on a real big chunk. of ice, and
Bill, who is an everlasting mean kind
of boy, was for showing him off into
the water just so, but / would not. l
had bit of twine in my pocket, and |
hitched it to jagged bit of the ice. so
as it couldn't get off. Oh, we had lots
of fun at first with that 'erc pup as a
passenger. But Bill is an awful orna-
ry boy, Mister, so when it was his turn
to play tow horse with the chunk of
ice and the dog for passenger, he just
let the cord slide on purpose, SO he did.
Then pitched into that 'ere Bill Bost-
wick and guv him fits. But You see
there was the Ice, and the pup as was
passenger, sliding down that 'ere river
like thunder. felt sure the passenger
was going to be drowned /; as ] happen
ed to know that pups mother ] felt
kind of sorry, SO / went again tor Bill
Bostwick, and went for him good.
just then the cake of ice, with the
v<s,,. nun voIY,i,,ce ard ka;usn;,,cp ~, IL
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

STANLY OR RowI.ANDs.-The Vest
era Morning Nescs says: at turns
out to be fact, as was some time ago
reported, that Stanly, the African ex-
pIorcr, is not Stanly at all, bat Row
lands. 1t will he remembered that
when he was over here last the question
as to his nationality was raised, and it
now appears to be settled. lie is not
an American but Welshman. John
Rowlands, alias Henry NJ. Stanly, left
his home at Denbigh several years ago.
After reaching America he assumed the
name of Stanly, and under that name
wrote to his friends. In 1865 he was
IN the United States navy, and served
as an officer, with e350 a year pay.
In 1866 he visited his mother, who has
married a second time, and rs now Mrs.
Jones; and on Dec. 14th of that year
he for the occasion dropped his assumed
name and addressed the school children
at St. Asaphs where he had received
his early education. Soon afterwards
he became connected with the Ne,c
York Herald, and was sent to Eng
land to be chief correspondent for that
paper. Then followed his expedition
in behalf of Livingstone, and the success
of it so delighted the Americans that
Stanly did not care to wound tlneir
national seli-esteem by telling them that
he was not one of them, but only a
Britishor who had accomplished the
feat. So in this country he played the
roio Of 40 American citizen; but to Isil
friends in Wales he spoke bis native
Welsh"
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
A constant Reader.
BY PARsrENAs MIX.


The overworked scribe of the t'Mudyille
Gazette
Sat wondering -moneyless wight
If his office would ever be cleared of its
debt,
With the times so deplorably tigst,-
When the tread of old leather was heard
on the stair
And a stranger stepped into the room,
Who asked with the stdon't let me bother
you' air,
Which the bore is 80 apt to assume
GLOW are ye?'' The editor rose with
smile
And pleasantly yielded his chair
Placed the visitors sadly unbeautifll tile
(Which exhibited symptoms OF wear)
On the top of the desk, along side of his
own
A shocking old plug. by the wayh
And then asked in rather obsequious tone,
''Can we do any thing for you to-day ?''
''No- jest called to see ye''-the visitor
said {:
I'm friend to the newspaper man
Here he ran red handkerchief over his
head,
And accepted the EDITORS fan
II hev red all the pieces you've writ for
your sheet,
And they re straight to the pint, con-
less
That 'ar slap you gin Keyser was sartinly
neat
You're an oriiyment, sir, to the press 20
81 am glad You are pleased" said the
writer, ''lndeed;
But you praise me too highlys by far
Just select an exchange that you're anx-
ious to read,
And while reading it, try this cigar.
By the way, I've a melon laid up for n
treat
I've been keeping it nestled in ice,
It's beauty, sir, fit for an angel to cat
Now, perhaps, you VIII relish a slice ?''
Then the stranger rolled up half dozen or
more
OF the choicest exchanges of all
Helped himself to the fruit, threw the rinds,
on the floor.
Or flung them at flies on the wall.
He assured his new friend that his 'spieces
were wrote
In manner oneommonly able
As he wiped his red hands on the editor
coat
That hung at the side of the table.
by the way, I've neglected to ask you
your name,"
Said the scribe as the stranger arose;
s"Fhat's fact, he replied, ''I'm Abima-
lech Bame,
You have lleerd o. that name, suppose ?
I'm a-livin' out here on the Fiddletown
Creek
Where own good house and lot;
The Gazette gets around to me wunst
every week
I'm the colstantest reader you've got -
''Abin,aleci1 Bainc,'' unused the editor,
',B-a-yl-c-
tTIere his guest begged chew of his
twistD-
81 am sorry to say your mellifiuous name
Doesn't happen to honor my list.''
's .Spose not; - was the answer-s'no rea-
son it should,
For see jine lots with Bill Prim-
He's a reg'lar subscriber and pays We in
wood,
And bory your paper o. him! -
-Ncgfb6er.S
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
REPUBLlcAN STATE CONvENTTON,

A Republican State Convention is here
by called to convene in the city OF POI tiantI,
Wednesday, May Sd, 1876, at ii O'Clock
A. NJ, TO select six delegates to the Nation
al Republican Convention, candidates Tor
iutIres of the supreme court In the second
third and flfth judicial districts, for prose-
cutting attorneys for the several judicial dis
tricts, three presidential electors, and a
candidate for representative in congress,
and for the transaction of such other busi-
ness as may come before the convention.
It is recommended that primary and
county conventions in the several counties
be held as follows: Urinary conventions
on Wednesday, April 18th. and county
conventions on Wednesday. April 26th, or
at such other times as the county commit
tees may appoint.
delegates i'm the said convention upon the
basis of the Republican vote for representa-
tive in congress in 1875:
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

Influence OF THE Press On the
intelligent and loyal press of the coun-
try the hopes of the nation depend.
The people look to the press for correct
information, and on this they base their
judgment of governmental affairs. A
bad paper conveys moral poison
wherever it circutates. If it is edited
with commanding ability, its power for
evil is greatly Increased, and this is still
further enlarged in proportion to its cir
culation. How vital, then, in view OF
this, becomes the necessity of support
ing good papers. Every citizen who
believes in public and private morality
should extend liberal support to his home
paper. HIS first duty should be to
strengthen that. If he has patronage,
it should go to the local organ before a
dollar is sent to paper at distance.
The principle of home protection should
be applied to the local papers of the
country.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
Professor e'Or.,erea.

The Rev. DIR. Richie, of Edinburgh,
though a very clever man, sometimes
met with his match. When examin-
ing student as to the classes he had
attended, he said i:
"And you attended the class in
mathematics Z"
eye"
ssHow many sides has circle 9''
HTwo," said the student.
ss1Vl,at are they 20
g An inside and an outside"
The Doctor then said esAnd you
attended the philosophy class also ?''
stYeso
"Well, you would hear lectures on
various subjects. Did you ever hear
one on cause and effect
ssYes.''
docs an effect ever go before tbe
cause ?''
eyes .
s'Give me an instance
A man wheeling barrow
The Doctor sat down.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

The o. S. n. Company has commenc-
ed at Cello, the construction of new
steamboat, which is TO be built of such
light draft that It can ascend and de-
scend the Snake river as far as Lewis
ton at the lowest stage of water. The
boat is designed especially to meet the
demands Of trade during that portion
Of the season when navigation has here
to6ore been suspended. The Dimensions
OF the new craa are Length $50 feet
beam SO feet, hold A feet.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

Victoria has 100 horses, and weeps
bitter tears every day because she can
rile only one at time and sideways
at that.
The japanese saloon keepers must do
large credit business. A Northamp-
ton county man has contracted to ship
$4,000 states to Japan.
Governor Rice. of Massachusetts,, re-
fuses to review the procession on St.
Patrick's day, and yet he himself is not
a plebeian, but Patrickian.
Cremation in New York is dead.
All the cremation clubs have disbanded
and not the first corpse has been burned.
This is where the grave has its victory.
In Brooklyn it is always considered
cogent argument in favor of temper
ance societies, to see a bald-headed
alderman trying to part his hair in the
middle.
Those who live nearest the depot are
generally the last ones to get on hoard
the tram, so those who live nearest the
church are almost always the last ones
to come in Sunday mornings.
Life is too brief to fool away. and
every man should improve the short time
he has to live by proving to the public
that If a clothes pin is crowded too
hard on the line it will split in the back.
A would-be fashionable woman in
the West, under sentence of death for
murder, has only one request to make.
She wants the shade of her dress to
match that of the rope. A corded
silk would be appropriate.
Why are cents separated from dol.
lars by point? To make sense, oi
course. Don't you see the point?
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
And now comes a natural curiosit,

And now comes natural curiosity
produced bya China goose at Claquato.
1t was an egg within an egg, its dia-
meter being II inches the long way,
and inches the other. When broken
it was found to contain another egg,
the distance between the two SHELLS
beng about an inch, and the inner shell
being the harder of the two, though
both were perfect shells.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

Geo. H. Pendleton, the great peace
Democrat, testified yesterday, before
the Committee ON Expenditures in the
War Department, that while he PEN
dletonl was President Of the Kentucky
Central Railroad, he got claim for
the road through the War Department
for nearly $2OO, 900. His sister owned
nearly the entire railroad, and he was
executor Of her estate and guardian for
her children. as well as President of the
Railroad. He declared that he took
SIS, 600 for bis fee for collecting the
claim without dividing with anybody.
He took it from the railroad, OF which
he was President, and from the widow
and orphans, whose interests be was
bound as their executor to protect.
This Is considered, BY Democrats aa
well as BY Republicans, as the meanesi
steal ever ssunearthcdr IL Pendleton has
told the truth, but the general opinion
seems to Be that ssgeptleman George
has not told the truth Washington
Cor, Eugene Journal.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

aAh sin. = ii Chinese, means Victory.
Twenty years hence some Yankee, cool
ing himself on tie utmost peak Of The
Sierra Nevada, will CRY, g All Sin, where
Is thy victory Z" and two million bald
headed Asiatica viii patiently rise and
say, We ars klamin,' Failer AIlaham,
tlIee handIe husen mlore.o ?
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

At a meeting of the citizens of Benton
county, convened on the 18th inst, to take
into consideration The construction of 4
canal from some point on the Long Tom
or the Willamette river to terminate at
Corvallis committee was appointed. with
power to adopt articles of Incorporation,
with such capital rs may be required to
construct said canal, and that they cause
such preliminary examinations Of the savs
cFal routes and lines as may be necessary.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

The Amityites have forwarded a pO-
tition to the Postmaster General for a
money order Office, at that place. They
need It. certainly. They have not much
money to send off, but they would be
III bad FIX if some one wanted to send
them some.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

The scientific definition of what pc
culiarly constitutes man, Is certainly
suggestive. Plato says that man is
simply ga two-legged animal without
feathe,s.'' Socrates once ridiculed the
master by bringing into his school a
plucked rooster and saying. "Behold
the man of Plato % Man is sometimes
called "a laughing ANIMAL" sometimes
e.an animal with tlumbs,'' and some
times "a lazy animal.'' But Adam
Smith was not far wrong when he call
ed him San animal that makes bargains
No other animal docs this. No dog
exchanges bones with another" These
definitions are not adapted to feed our
conceit, however valuable they may be
10 other respects.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

Some parties are discussing the desira-
bleness Of teaching children to use both
hands alike. Before urging this am.
bidextraI Improvement, had we not
better wait until the country gets itself
out ofthe stealing period ; little. one
hand is quite enough TO be employed 10
s.reachipg things,
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

In making this call for Republican
State Convention, the State Central Com
mittee realize the fact thar too much impor-
tance cannot be attached to preliminary
operations. This being government of
the people, by the people. fo- the people, :"
the agents or officers OF the government
should be in accord with the people. Ac-
cording to the general accepted plan of
selecting candidates, the first steps are ta-
ken in our primary. county and State con-
ventions. These form the ground work of
political organization upon which the whole
SuperstrucEufe must stand or fall. If hon.
est men desire honest officials, is it asking
too much that they lay aside for day all
necessary to select proper persons to attend
county and State conventions?
In view of these considerations and of the
important interests at stake we earnestly
appeal to all legal voters who are in sym
pathy with the principles OF the Republican
party, regardless of personal likes and dis
likes to rally at the primaries, and see to it
that none bat true men are entrusted with
the business of preparing for the coming
political campaign: Select men who are
not only true themselves in the broaGlest
sense of that term but men of dtSceFnnteNt,
men who can and will Clluose wisely for the
good of the people in defiance of rings
nd ttcliques. .
It is unnecessary at this time to reiterate
in this call the principles of the Republican
party; its glorious record is still fresh in
the memory OF an enlightened public it
is sound upon all the great principles affect
ing our national existence it is the party
of progress and development it exposes
corruption wherever found and inflicts pun
iShment upon conspiratOrS, fearful and sud
den, without respect of person or position ;
it favors the universal enlightenment of the
people without trammel of creed or ism ;
and its banner is found in the van leading
on the hosts of ref0rmers in all that tends
to higher civilization aud enlarged freedom.
j.. S. SCOTT, Chairman.
j. C. MORELAND, Secretary pro TEN.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

The Courier-.Jo,r7eal comes right
up to the confessional candidly as fol-
lows: s'If every husband who deserved
it were whipped by his wife, the stock
of rawhides in this country would be
exhausted in four ard twenty hours. -
Now some other man can own up.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

The General of Canada
gets s48, ,666 &C year, besides his resi-.
dence and staff; the Premier receives
5000, aud the twelve other ministers
there, 81 900 each. The Lieutenant
Governors of Ontario. Quebec and
Manitoba, and the Northwestern Terri
tories, $4,000 each; those of Nova
Scotia, New Brunswick, aud British
Columbia, 10000 each and the Lieu
tenant-Governor of Prince Edward
Island, 81 900. The Chief Justice Of
the Supreme Court has $s, 900, and the
FIVE Justices 81 900 each.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

A lady writes 70 ask the origin of the
phrase The army swore terribly at
Flanders . and what occasioned the pro-
family? Mr. Flanders was one Of Bel
knap's suffers, and bis prices and gem
eral disregard for all the rules Of trade
so incensed Che army that il cussed him
with All its strength.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
PILES. Piles

WHY SAY THIS DAMAGING AND
w troublesome complaint cannot be
cured, when so many evidences OF success
might be placed before you every day
cures of supposed hopeless cases? Your
physician informs you that the longer you
allow the complaint TO exist, You lesseu
Your chances for relief. Experience has
CtItqit: this iva all cases.
A. CarOGhers & Co.'s Pile PiIis nna
Ointment
nro all they are rccoInmendeo to be. VIII
cure Chronic, Blind and bleeding Piles In
"a very short time and are conUcnf-yat 90 use.
This preparation is sent hy mail or ex-
press to any point within the L Enitcd States
at Al 30 per package.
Address, A. CARoTHERS & Co.,
27v5 Box 33, Albany, Oregon.
The Eugene firemen are making ar
rangements for grand ball at Lanes
Hall on Christmas eve.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

You must remember which are the
most noisy vegetables the potato balls,
and you can make 5 pumpkin hoIIer.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

What is related here happened to
James Wilkie Wheeling, publisher OF
the Dresden { o. Doings. While a
pupil of the Dresden Union Schools,
though quiet lad, it was generally
supposed he would have taken q whip
ping any time rather than be knocked
out Of the perpetration of good joke.
We find him, Miss Springer, and a large
birch, in consultation. The teacher
exclaims, in strong severity: stDidn't
you say sOctayo fell in the Spring 2 -
"Yes'm. and he did and he viii prove
it himself" Octave was interrogated,
and explained that he had slipped his
footing on an orange peel, and bumped
the earth with the back of his head.
The teacher suddenly recollecting that
it was the 1st of April, screamed, with
a true womanly toreIhought, $50 TO
your seat !'' and he turned to obey, re-
marking" If that wasn't fall ID the
Spring. I'd like to know what season
of the year this Dasa5,0.y -Ne,cs.
A middletown compositor has calcu-
lated that in the course of years type
setting the average compositor will put
up more than 1000, 900 separate pieces,
which, with their distribution, requires
more than 10000 motions OF the
hand.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
CHICAGO a NORTHEwESTERN RAILWAY
THIS Is THE BEST ROUTE EAST.


Its Track rs Of STEEL RAILS. and on 4 has
MADE In TINS country by TINS TnMIg M -
gers orDoints east OF Chicago have choice 81 tn@
following lines from Chicago:
- and Pen..syivasafa Ksaalwayss
:, THROUGH TRAINS DAILY. with Pullman
> Palace cars through to Philadelphia ana new
York each train.
L to baltimore and Washington
ny tI,s Lake shore and msesNe New sSSs TSr
central and Erie zsaiifondsi.
- THROUGH TRAINS DAILY, with Palace
| to New York.
| Ssreat western nasd Erie and New X~r&
| - T.rRoIr;TT TRAINS. with Pullman Pnlacs
, Drawing Room and sigepinR t GaIe nans ~
| or New York city.
| nv baltimore and Ohio RahAr@@@s
= THROUGH TRAINS DAILY. with PnIlmen
Palace for Newarls " nee.ns'
r,,,. "a the SHORTEST, BEST and only line
.,,,,nInss TnS % puIlinan celebrated PAIACE SLEEP
ING CARS AND COACHEs conneetaIfk ssa 9 VIZ g,.a
Union PACIFIC a Raiosa 1netion Ss aarshS Csasr
GHGS EspaSSSia iaap GsiD'2fai TaE s'i EAST.
Tpis popular route is unsnrraaasd for Speed.
C1m16rr ncrfc1 aae Track OF stsi raa te caiebrmt
ed Pulman Palace slseping a sa5s: sfs s PsEsSes
iapifS with which they rum tho admirable MR.
ranremenf for running through cars 90 Chicago
from an points West secure % passengers o. Sls
changes of Cars, and no tedious delays nt Fer
rfes. $500 q. - =. ..zsx...s-
rol,fe Mt the General Ticket Once OF the CentrnA
i Pacific Railroad. sacramento
Tickets for sale at ali the TIeset 9Mces g ~
4 Central Pacific Railroad. W&f4f 81 En- II -,
MARVIN HUGHITTt Gen sur. Sen fqs a *
ronlery street, san Francisco. vtht4y
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

WHICH HAS STOOD THE TEST OF 40
YEARS.
There is no sore it will not heal, no lame
ness it will not cure. no ache, no pain, that
affllct the human body, or the body of a
horse or other domestic animal, that does
not yield to its magic touch. A bottle
costing 25c. Soc. or 81 90, has often saved
the life of human being, and restored to
life and usefulness many a valuable horse.
FOR MEN, II Will. CURE
Rheumatism. Burns, Scalds, Bruises. Cuts,
Frost bites, Swellings, Contracted Cords.
Pain I'm the Back, Iumbago. Sciatica,
Chllblains, Strains, Sprains, Stiff Joints.
Sore Nipples, Eruptions, Pains, Wounds.
FOR ANIMALS, IT WILL CURE
SPAWN, Calls and Sores, Swinny. Ring
Bone, Windgalls, Big Head, Poll Evil,
Humors and Sores, Lameness, Swellings,
Scratches, DistempeE Stiffness, Strains,
Soreness, Open Sores 26vs
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

During leap year every woman has
an unelienable right to make love and
the fire III the morning.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
'EPIzOoTICs DISTANCES.

THE BAY TEAM STILL LIVES,
A Nd Is FLOURISHING LIKE A GREEN
IN bay tree. Thankful for past favorE,
and wishing to merit the confinunnee of
the same, the BAY TEAM Will always be
ready, and easily fonnd, to do any hauling
within the city limits, for a reasonable
coinpensallon. Gas ~ eAIve9y .. Ss%f feye
Specially. A. ~. ARNOLD.
26v5 Proprfefor.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

Ifthere is anything that can discount
a guinea hen for amusic, " we give it up.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28

CENTENNIAL.
1876. 1876.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1876-04-28
Juss Issued. aoosh EaIt.oa.
MANHOOD.

MA n HOOD
Revised and corrected by the anthor, e. dc T.
Curtis, NJ d.. &C, &C.
A Medical Essay on the cause and cure of pre-
mature decline in man, showing how health -
lost, and regained. IT gives clear synopsis OF
the impedxInents to marriage, the treatment OF
nervous and physical debility, exhausted vital.
tty, and all other diseases Appertatng thereto; /;
the results of twenty years successful practice.
Opinions Of 9HRe PwesSe
CURTIS ON NaMANI7OOT1.g-T isno Inenn-
bcr OF society by whom this book Will not pc
found useful, whether he be parent preceptor
or Clergyman. K.oSsdos TinseS.
CURTIS ON NttALANET00D. ~ This book sfl0S,I ~
be read by the Young for instruction. ana oy
the afllicfed fofxelief; tt will inture no one
saExSfcuI Tfnaes ard G1zette.
Price One Dollar by mail or express Aa-
dress the autor. DIR. CURTIS, 510 sutfer Stfeefs
! or r. @. Boz 337, san Frauciscas Cal.
sSv7sn3