Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1875-05-21

place, strapped on the monkey, and b.
| looked like goblin crusader. "Ther
are so many things which have to d.
/ with any peculiar organism" said Dr.
! Parry, as he was about laying poor Nose
again in his basket, "that we should re
call what Mr.. Mills says, to-wit: .Tha
| the existence of date tree, a lion (w,
may add even of performing monkey
| is the Joint result of many natural law.
| physical, chemical, biological, an6
| even astronomical. 1t is, therefore, the
| surgeons duty to allow no loop-hole fol
| escape. Pray observe the patients tail
! See how it still undulates. We will tucl
| it up gracefully, give it this daub of glue
and secure it to his walst-band, other
wise he might use it in an involuntary
| way prejudicial to the case.
II The history of that monkey and of his
convalescence and ultimate recovery
would require too long time to narrate
For two whole nights DR.. Parry sat uT
with The patient More ran once chic
reform had to be given Moses, with an
application of new bandages. Maybe
Moses had more lives than a cat, but he
eventually came round. Once on the
mend his recovery was surprisingly
rapid. Advantage having been taken OF
his well known kleptomaniac instincts
it was only necessary to pretend to hide
from him the medicine we wanted him
to take in order to get him to steal 1t
and swallow it. DR.. Parry gave him
phosphates, for the Strengthening of his
brain, in large quantities. The first
positive assurance of his being in q nor
NAL condition was caused by a terrible
+or 1;,,or -, f1o2 e.
nate cat hadventured in. Moses had her
by the tail and was experimenting with
her, swinging her around as if intent on
solving some problem of the centrifugal
theory. Whether this was reminis-
cence of his happy family days or not /
amsnot prepared to state. :
What was strange was the peculiar
manner in which sympathy was devel-
oped for Moses in Granville. Little
boys going to school would loiter on
our pavement by the hour, in order to
get a glimpse of Moses. Neighbors
commenced sending kind messages to
the house about Moses One good old
lady. even offered her carriage for
the purpose of giving the monkey an
airing. My wife declares some people
left their cards on Moses. I became the
recipient of packages of medicines for.
warded to me by enterprising persons.
Some were accompanied by letters urg.
ing a "single trial and a certificate from
either Moses or myself" and the carrot
cathartic, parsnip purge and turnip tonic
offered me the sole agency for the State
provided would affirm that "Moses
owed his life to free usage of that IN
valuable remedy" What is more won
derful, the doctor got practice through
Moses. Baby colics became epidemic in
our streets and all Granville was afflict-
ed with whitlows, and occasional tract
ures made their appearance, and the
door-ben became nocturnal grievance.
If Moses cure brought its rewards it
bore its penalties. We were interviewed.
Why, IN addition to the simple story OF
the monkey, my wife's personal appear
ance, her age, my political opinions and
the varied articles of clothing hanging in
the garden to dry were catalogued-qu
facetiously, of course-and spread before
100000 readers, am at a loss to say.
This October / was in receipt of the
following letter, which read to the doc
tor and my wife
DEAR s1R-Through our travelling agent,
who passed through your enterprising town
some weeks ago, I hear that Moses is well.
Chuffiers, whose zebra shows some sign of
founder, wants to know, having high re-
spect for your brother-in-law, DR.. Parry's
abilities-he wants to know If he would like
to undertake curing the zebra. OF course
ship him to me G. O. D. But my few lines is
mostly writ for another purpose, as follows
My wife, she says, has got presentiment
that the doctor who cured Moses might do
our daughter some good. Mebbe she dreamed
it. don't never take on to view contrary to
hern, for she made me by her good advice
what / am. This, then, is to say that if DR..
Parry will come to our place and take charge
of our suffering girl, and do the best he can,
we don't ask any more 1t amt out of the
way in me in a case like this to say that
money ain'tno object. Hoping to hear from
you by return mail, am, with great respect,
SAUL KosIosKo WoGGLAM.
P. S.-My programme-man mostly does my
writing, so you'll examine this. Chuff1ers begs
to send some love-birds to your madame.
They are pretty creatures, and hope the
cage have chosen will prove acceptable,
likewise ornamental s. K. w.
"Will you go?'' I asked.
Certainly said the doctor, without a
moments hesitation.
"Would you mind taking friend with
you? inquired.
"You mean Moses?" said the doctor.
" Not bit"
"I mention with regret" added my
wife, "that tendency Moses has to go
to sleep in the baby's crib, though origi-
nal, is not generally pleasing, and that
certain snbstitutions of food Moses in
sists ON for my own darling are detri-
mental to infantile nourishment."
The doctor and Moses left the next
day. The monkey had no regrets. In fact,
of late he had assumed a staggering
and swashbuckler air. / am inclined to
think his long sojeurn in the happy fam
lily had so fully imbued his ideas with
that peculiar condition of existence that
he thought he was superior. Certainly
lie presumed on our good nature, and
had commenced to bully us Moses
adieu was touchingly eyinced by his loll-
ing out his tongue, and wink.ng to
my wife in singularly impertinent, yet
patronizing. manner. Here is the last
episode in this monkey history. It is a
letter from DIR. Parry to his sister, my
wife, read by me to her at breakfast
table:
DECEMBER, 1S74-MY DEAR SIsTER-Resi-
dence here is both agreeable and profitable.
1t is probable that 1 will cast anchor in this
thriving town. How it is / can hardly state,
but have been so busy that trust this wiH
excuse my having written to you SO rarely for
the last month or so. The young lady, the
daughter of the gentleman at whose instiga-
tion / came here-this young lady found had
been miserably treated. Some mechanical
appliances, novel ones of my own, have given
the most fortunate results. Our invalid de-
clares herself freer from pain than she has
been for years. A week ago she put aside
her crutch, and l see no reason why, God
willing, she should not in time be perfectly
well. Her resignation under suffering, hel
amiability sand sweet temper My wife
"Ahem! is that underscoredr "No," said
!" allow me to continue l-must accelerate hel
cure. Miss Wogglam is highly educated and
thorough musician and sings and plays de