, 1875-08-22

ward and his Angelina parted with the consols-
tlou Of soul rubbing to greet soul through tne
medium OF muttou-chops in tha morning.
Miscellaneous NOTES.
There IS one block in Detroit without q female
gossip. It is a vacant block.
An Indian maiden who wea1s army pants and
chews tobacco goes by the pretty name OF Fall
ing Water."
To prevent her lover from "going back" On
bis promise. = Detroit girl always introduces him
to her friends "a ''my intended husband"
The new embroidered stockings costing SIS
and upwards. whom worn By young girl named
Ann. might we'll be atyied Hosannas 10 the
Queen Of Fashion.
Advertising pays Toledo man advertised
for q servant girl. and one OF his three wives
knocked 1t the door IL less than tive houta after
the paper WAS out
When YOU observe = lady drop her handker-
chief In the street and not atop to pick it up,
the chances are ten to one that ahe hasn't got
der stoop-over dress Oh.
Men are ereatic. Wilism Homer, OF Memphis,
permitted his wife to give grand party, and,
when tie guests had arrived, ha brought IN the
garden-hose and sprinkled them ont.
A nevspaper-biographer, trying to say his
subject q was hardly able to bear the demise OF
his wife, was mado by the inexorahle printer to
aey, "wear tile chemise OF hls WIFE,"
When Vermont man found that the medical
students had stolen the body OF his nawly-buried
wife, ho remarked that it Was q sad case, but
that he had saved the cost OF 3 Tombstone.
A fashionably- -dresaed young woman, putting
fancy touches at the music yesterday, was heard
singing, " Backward, pin backward, oh, skirts in
your fight; make me look smAlt again, Just Tor
tonight"
They must have been engaged, for in the ice-
cream room, the other evening. he blew her
cream for thirty minutes 90 it wouldn't ecaid her
mouth. Such instances Of depraE1ty are never
witnessed after marriage.
An exchange says: "Tbe Sandwich Islanders
believe that Beelzebub walks tho earth in the
will find man III this country who believes 80
too, and that he has married the woman.
Tbs funeral cortege moved slowly down the
street. and, as ahe lett tlla house OF mourning.
she observed to her companion: ''Lizzle, II
any OF our folks should die, don't think rd
wear Grape rosettes on my bonnet, would you :"
An Indiana girl wanted to $50 it her lover really
loved her, and che gos boy tYyeIi mad
dog!" a. they were Walking out The lover
flew over fance and lef. her to be chewed up,
and abe went right away and married stoEe~
clerk.
Brooklyn sick girl cleared space around
thirteen ears Of green corn At one meal the other
day, and, picking the fragments from between
her teeth with hai1-pin, observed: III over /
get we'll enough again to eat much, think
could live On corn"
An English minister, whlle marrying couple
OF his rustic parishioners, felt exceedingly dis
concerted, on his asking the bridegroom II he
were willing to take the woman for his welded
wife, by his scratching hia head and saying !:
"Ay, I'm wul'in'; but I'd rather hae her sister."
1 Boston schoolgirl Of tender years thus
| writes to her bosom-friend: Dear Susie: l
| Shau't attend school agln until Get some new
| cuffs, collars, aud Jewelry-de8r Mama agrees
with me that it is my dootv to take tue shine out
| OF that Upstart Many! 5ones, and III do it II
| never learn nothiog."
| A seaside romaunt-Rugeno, poet to
| Amelia:
Como sit down on the shelly ahora,
| And hear the mighty ocean roar.
| Amelia, fashionable young lady, to Eugene
| can't sit down you silly goose,
Because I'd buat my pul~back 1oose.
| He had very promising boil betveen the
| shoplder- blades and his wife, who Was young
aud beautiful, and could play on the harp but
hadn't nursod much in the hospitals, put mus
tard-plaster on it, A lawyer subsequently e1-
| planned to him that they didn't grant diVotoes
| Tor such Causes in this State.
The Leaveuwortb bele is frequently forced te
| take whisky in self-defsnse. At ball given
| there recently 80 \ young man Was gathering
| her in for Il round dance, her nose went up like
sensitive plant and, jerking herself loose tEo1l
him she exclaimed onn ses
| you ain't TIL have to have anohher drink o.
| chAoge my partner.
II don't consider her anything but pert, up
| start hussy She's got no taste; her clothe!
don't ft her; her bonnet's q perfect fright
she's freckled. weata striped stocslngs, and has
| vatt on her back as big IS pigeons egg,
bitterly exclaimed lovelv girl, hurllng her cro-
| quet-Halet on the ground. and Glanc1ng IN tne
| direction OF her vanquisher, Who WAS proud!5
walking OF the field with the Light Of victory II
her eyo.-Brooeivn Arqus
For teo OF twelve evenings past young mar
| with red halr and sad look has called At the
| Post Office and asked for mail from Lhe West
Disappointment after Disappointment AWAITED
him, and last n1ght, whom the clerk said Moth
ing. in his calm, mouotonous voice. the youns
man turned away, shook his fist III the ar, ano
mutte1ed: - / sent her two 3-ceut stamps II
that letter asking for her hand, and, sht
doesn't answer By tomorrow night. I'll know
that she's amsrcena5y hyp0crite '"-oel'0'E FIRE.
| Press
The United States District Court in Joaquin I'LL
1ere State has given $4,000 damages to a young
German girl Of 10. whose beauty Was permanent
" spoiled by an accident on board the steamsnil
OriAamne. Of the Oregon Company last March
The Judge gave 1t as his opinion that P" Persona
comeliness is q consideration OF importance II
the caso Of every daughter Of Eve, since it ma "a!
affect her power Of Obtaining secure ana IN
dependent position in the community by mar
riaee." The opinion must be admitted 70 D
eonud, and not the less sound that It hmpI
translates into law tho famous old verso:
Ny face ia my fortune air, she said.
singular wedding took place at Vincennes
France. the other day. The ceremony. "as hxe'
for Il o'clock in the morning, st Whlch time a. a.
the parties appeared. But the bridegroom look
ed sui!en and annoyed ali through the ceremony 20
a1thoueh he said nothing out OF the way sna
J denly, as thev came ont Of the church; ne tooi
| his new mother-in-law aside and said to her
ASIadame, I have just been rejecting erea
denl. and have concluded that your daughte
j does not suit me- at all. bad never 'noslced 90
foro That ehe vas freckled. I prefer to e
away" aud, notwithstanding her entreanes, - a.
Jumped into passing carriage and drove nastu
away. He has not yet returned.
rich old widover in Moronci, Mich, had
h1oomnc and afectionate widow for nea
| na;ohbor' and, when be was tn zen s.ck, she yer
consi5arately nursed him aud supplied his ever
want But, when ho Vas convalescent, she oe
came aggressive, and limited that he ought :
mary her and that she would sue him i ne re re