The Hartford herald. [volume] (Hartford, Ky.) 1875-1926, 1875-12-29
My Cousin Johns Wife.

~
MY Cousin Johns wife.
Every respectable family should
have a Cousin John. wish that 1
could add that he had always been an
ornament to society. an honor to him,
self and the Flower of the family" A
strict regard for veracity-it answers
my purpose on the occasion-forbids
any such observation on my part. /
am obliged to say this masculine spec
linen ofour ancient race was absolute
ly the fag-end of our characters. Seem
ingly, he was the recipient of what was
left after furnishing the heads and
hearts of ali the Others. When the
grand danes, aunts or uncles, desired
% illustrate any particular vice, John
was held up as the frightful example.
Not that he was an assassin, a high
wayman or politician. He was sim>
ply a maelstrom Of carelessness and
generosity. Ifit had not been for the
good luck which always followed him,
he would have made frst>class vag-
abond. As it was, he made out to be
a well-dressed, handsome, good fel-
Iow." Beyond that he could not be
, trusted, and then only when ones eyes
were on him.
1 was sitting in my solitary parlor
one morning, in momentary expecta-
ton Of receiving an appeal from sister
Jane to hasten to ''The Naples" as the
twins were down with the measles; a
summons from Aunt Hannah to bid
h&>a last, lingering farewell-linger>
ing is the proper word. and as / had
been through the ceremony seven
times-snd an invitation from Cousin
Sarah to run over and turn her black
elk. Besides that; had my own
sorrow. My Tabby had been invisible
for two days. The evening before she
had disappeared she had refused the
fifth saucer of milk for her supper,
and app cared pensive. l feared she
had committed suicide, or wandered
out in this unfeeling world, because
neighbor Browns Tab had Tilted her
for Mrs. Rays green eyed, black, ugly
feline she had the audacity to call
Beauty"
Just then, as ] was bitterly regret.
ing that / had not taught Tabby, from
ny own experience, something of the
hckleness of the world, and mankind
in particular, who should come blum.
dering in but John. OF course he up
set chair, overturned my work-bas.
ket, knocked book OF the table, step.
ped on my weather-olacle toe, and
tumbled into my best chair with a
crash. Then he reached over to the
stand beside me, and, taking a pin,
began to draw figures upon my rose
wood writing. desk.
GOOD morning, John" ! remarked.
Say, Sebrina," he replied, jabbinl
at his forehead with a pin, Il am to
be married next week"
"You surprise me, John"
Doubtless; but it's q settled fact.
i have purchased the little cottage on
the hill yonder. 1t is prepared for the
bride. Now you want to 60 over ant
make the place home-like. Have I
jolly supper ready next Thursday
night when we come. You can, Sc
brina; you have no husband"
"John," / cried, at isn't for me Il
cay. / might have had a dozen hus
bands" with touch of pride.
"And all died of broken heart" b.
laughed. "But will you go?"
Having survived in the champion
ship Of my own cognomen until l haC
arrived at respectable age, / was &C
customed to being a convenience.
think our family had habit of consid
ering it charity to make me useful
Therefore didn'tsay NAY, John"
In due time I went over to the cot