davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Every condition of life has its advantages
and Its peculiar sources of happiness 1t is
not the houses and the streets which make
tn city, but those who frequent them it is
not the fields which make the country, but
those who cultivate them. He is wisest who
best utilities his circumstances, or to translate
it, his surroundings; and happiness, if we
desire it, will find US, wherever our lot may
be cast.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

It is related of Sir James Simpson, the Gel
ebratcd English physician, that the Duchess
of Buccleugh drove up to his door and sent
her footman to tell him that she waited with
out. "Tell the Duchess, /" he replied, that
DIR. Simpson is engaged with washerwo-
man,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

AN ECCENTRIC FELLow.-The Duchess of
Marlborough had a relative, commonly called
Jack Spencer, WAC was very eccentric char
acter. One of. his whimsical freaks was to
take hackney coach with three friends on a
dark evening, and order the man to set them
down in gloomy part of the Strand at the
side of the new church. He had previously
opened the door opposite to that where the
coachman waited, and as Spencer and his
friends quilted the coach on the one side, they
went around and entered on the other
The coachman was at first surprised that
more issued from the carriage than he had
taken in. AS they continued to go round and
come out, he became droadfully alarmed, and
at length his terror was 80 great that he ran
from tho coach, and rushed into the first pub
lie house, telling the people there he must
have taken in legion of devils for he add
ed, with every sign of horror, that he had on
ly taken four ip, but he counted eighteen out,
and that more were coming when he left the
coach.
1t is said lie once contrivcd to collect d par
ty of hunckbackcd men to dine with him,
some Of whom Indignantly quilted the table.
Another whimsical party which he assembled
at his house consisted merely of number of
persons, all of whom suffered but this
meeting at first threatened serious consequence
es, for each supposed he was Knocked by the
other, and it was with great difficulty that
their host restored peace by acknowledging
the ludicrous purpose of his invitation.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

The pounding of the stomach for the cure
of dyspepsia was the cause of good joke the
other day. Two men were describing what
they had done to cure themselves. do You
knead your stomach 20 "I-I-couldn't get
along without it /" responded tho other, in
the last stage Of establishment.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Alecturer, addressing an audience, contend
cd with tiresomc prolixity that art could not
improve nature until one Of his hearers, los
ing all patience, set the room in roar by ex-
claiming Glow VOID you look without
your wig?"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

What perfect idea of impecuniosity is
given in the remark made last week by one
responding Hibernia to another. "Faith,"
says one, az haven't more than ten cents in
my pocket" Be jabers," retorted the 9TH
er, you arc better off than am, then, I've
nothing in my pocket, and very little of that
ayther."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

think l can suit you to hair " said
boarding house landlady to a bachelor appli-
cant who had been stating his requirements.
"Suit me to hair, ma'am hope not
that's what my last landlady tried to do and
gave me samples in the butter"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

When boy has been off all day, contrary
to the expressed wish of his mother, and on
approaching the homestead at night, with an
anxious and cautious tread, finds company at
tea, the expression of confidence and rectitude
which suddenly lights up his face cannot be
reproduced on canvas.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

What are you dancing around for ?" in-
quired Bert of Dode. "Glory huff for one
day I" replied Dode, jumping still higher, "a
cow got into the garden this morning. and
tramped every bed fiat as yer hat, and won't
have to pull another weed this Summer!''
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

BY rinsing the hands entirely free from ev-
cry trace Of soap and drying them thoroughly,
chaps and skin cracks may be avoided even in
the coolest weather. Most Of the toilet soaps
are caustic, or full of I've, and act injuriously
npon the skin unless this precaution is rigor-
ously observed.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Sixty miles to the north of Duluth, "the
zenith city of the unsalted seas" an iron
mountain has been discovered which rivals
its namesake in Missouri. 1t is eight miles
long, one and a half miles wide, and 1900
feet above the level Of Lake Superior.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

The editor of the Bowmanville Statesman
had man fined ten dollars for throwing an
ink bottle at him. Yet this editor has been
singing ink at everybody else for years--only
be didn't sling it bottled up.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Qnin, the actor, being assci by lady wi
there were more women i, the world than
men, replied, " 1t is in conformity with the
0'her arrangements Of Nature-w always see
more Of heaven than of earth"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

SO dark, andyet SO light" as the man
said when he looked at his ton Of coal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Measure not men by Sundays, without re-
garding what they do all the week after.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

This good little boy was sitting on the step
whiting up his sisters embroidery frames
and muttering to himself, "This amt no good
world to live in unless Teller is his fathers
and mothers only orphan boy. What makes
me git SO mad is to have my sister 60 and take
all the ripe peaches to give, to that big loafer
of sweetheart of hers that comes around
here seven nights in week to get a square
meal and make out as if he wanted to talk
politics with the old man. / wish they'd
marry and 60 to Texas, I dol" And then
he threw the remnants of the frames in the
street and seemed lighter hearted.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

FIFTY YEARS AGo.--On the 9th of Sep.
tcmber last the semi-centennial anniversary
Of the opening Of the first English railway
was celebrated at Darlington, near Durham.
Discordant were the outgivings Of tl,e propl4
cts fifty years ago. The London Times pro-
duccs q paragraph upon railway projects,
which was written by a correspondent Of that
Journal when, before the completion of any
road for passenger travel, 4he country was
flooded with the 'prospectuses" Of the pro-
jectors. Probably a scheme Of air travelling
would not shock the prudence of practical
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10

Idle folks have the least leisure.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-11-10
NO. 1874

The SoEe OF THE SHIRT.--An ahecdote,
which Marx Lemon loved to tell, related to
the period when Tom Hood became a con-
tributor toPuncli. Looking over his letters
one morning, he opened ali envelope inclosina
poem which the writer said had been reject.
Cd by three contemporaries. II not thought
available for Punch, he begged the editor.
whom he knew but slightly 10 cousigfi Ii I'd
tfe wastespaper basket as Tie author was
!" sick at the sight Of Il. y Tie poem VIZ
signed Tom Hood, 2 and the lines were en-
titled !" The Song Of the Shirt The work
was altogether different from anything thar
had ever appeared IN Punch, and was con-
sidered so much out Of keeping with the
spirit of the periodical that at the weekly
meeting disqualification was opposed by several
members of the staff. Mark Lemon was SO
firmly impressed not only with the beauty Of
the work, but with its suitability for. the pa
per, that he stood by his first decision and
published it. By letter written by Tom
Hood to Mark Lemon, which we have for the
moment mislaid, it appears that the question
or illustrating the poem was entertained and
discussed. The lines, however. were publishs
ed without illustration, except that humorous
border of grotesque figures which made up
"Punch's Procession y on Dec. 10. 1S43.
1.-THE Song of the Shirt . trebled the sale of
the paper and created profound sensation
throughout Great Britain.--London Society.
, 1875-01-07
SUMMONS.

In tfre District Court of this Third Judicial Dis
trict Of the Territory of Washington, hoidiu8
/ Terms at the City of Seattle. in and for the
Counties of King Kitsap and Snohon.ish.
SIIaAS H. FOSTER,
VS.. Plaintiff.
CHARLES e. BkOwNEIL f
aud SARAH T. BROWNELL.
Defendants.
Complaint filed December 80. 1874. in tie Of.
fee the Clerk of said District Coart
United States Of America send Greeting
To CHARLES E. BRowNELLt and SARAH
T. BEOwNELL, Defendants.
UOU ARE HEREBY REQUIRED TO AP-
Il pear in an action brought sxainst you BY
the above named plaintiff. in the District Court
Of the Third Judicial District of the Territory
Of Washington. holding Tei.is at the City Of
eeattle, IN the County Of King. for the Counties
Of King Kitsap AMI Anohon;sh and to spSwer
the complaint filed therrin. Within twenty DAYS
exclusive of the day of service) after the ser-
vice on you CT this summons. if served within
the said County of King: or If served out Of
that County. but in this District, within thirty
days. otherwise within sixty days. or Judgment
by defarl. will be taken against you, according
to the prayer Of the complaint.
The said action is brought to obtain . good
and sufficient deed, conveying tOthe plaintiff all
the right. title and interest OF. in or to all that
certain lot. parcel or tract CT land situated ~
ing AMI being in said King County. wasnington
Territory at and near the mouth Of Black River.
and particularly known and described on th.,
maps and platts In the United States Land Of
fce. at Olympia, Washington Territ ,ry, IS tho
DONATION CLAIM Of CHARLES f. BaowSELL and
his wife, SARAH T. BRowNrIL. the rcfendant~
herein. The same containing three hundred
and twenty acres, more or less, which right. tflo
d interest was attempted to te conveyed to
Plaintiff by your supposed true and lawful At
t,rney, Dexter Horton, of Seattle, King County.
w. T., on the 7th day OF January. 1853. bu:
which conveyance was invalid. and for other re-
lief, all Of which will appear by reference 70 tho
complaint herein.
And you are hereby notified. thst II you fail
to appear and answer the said complaint as
above required, the said plaintiff viii apply to
the Court for . decree. appointing . Commits
sioner to convey said land. and for such other
equitable relief rs his complaint may entitl0
him to.
-, Witness the Hon. Orange Jacobs.
tsEAL. Judge Of said Court. and the seal
t-~' thereof. this 30ih day OF Decem.
Der, A. D. 1874. L. b ANDREWS.
II, L. BLANCHARD, d2O Clerk.
Attorney for llnintih.
, 1875-01-07
BANKRUPT NOTICE.
In the District Court of United States.

In the District Court of United States:
For the Third Judicial District of Washington
Territory holding terms At the City of Seattle.
in the County of King. and for the Counties
of King. Kitsap and Snonomish, in said Tor
ritory:
In the matter Of -r
THOS. 8. RUSSELL, In Bankruptcy.
Bankrupt. s1els
At the City Of Seattle in said District, on
the 22nd Gay Of December. 4. D. 1874.
THIRD JUDICIAL DISTRICT OF WASH. TER ss.
TO ALL WHOM 1T MAY CONCERN:
Take notice that . petition has been fled
in said Court by Thomas S. Russell, Of the City
of Seattle, in the County of King in said Dis
trict, duly declared a Bankrupt under the Act Of
Congress of March 2nd, 1867, and subsequent
kmendatory Actsfo discharge and certifcate
thereof from all his debts and other claims.
provable under said Acts, and that the thir,i
day of February next At 10 O'Clock A. NJ. is a.
sigued for the hearing Of the same. when and
where you may attend and show cause, if'sny
you have. why the prayer of the ssid Petition
should not be granted. L. B ANDREWS,
Clerk Of the District Court.
Dec 10 1T4-3w.
, 1875-01-07

Those who blow the corls
of others strife NAV chance to
have the sparks fly in their
faces.
A Salt Lake Mormon is
getting rich by hiring out his
wives to do washing and
house-cleaning.
If you will just take notice
you will find that a bald
headed man never raises his
hat to a lady.
Printers ink is the war
paint Of the worlds boldests
braves. These warriors are
battling against wrong.
The Baptists are talking of
holding a national convention
similar to that lately held by
the Congregationalists.
A writer in Scrlbner thinks
it improper for a person to
say, Excuse my glove" on
shaking hands with i; fellows
being.
A dog shot a man in Nor-
cester. The act was unpre-
meditated, however, the ami
NAL pulling the trigger with
a careless paw.
As a young lady at a par
ty was playing the piano
brilliantly, a rich old bachelor
exclaimed: "Td give the
world for those fingers
(" Perhaps you could get the
whole hand by asking for it,''
remarked the young lady's
mamma. .
A teacher, questioning lit
tie boys about the graduation
in the scale Of being, asked,
"What comes neat te MANI"
whereupon a little shaver,who
was evidently slna, ting under
a sense Of previous defeat, inn
mediately distanced all COM
petitors by promptly shouting,
ellis shirt, ma'amw
, 1875-01-07
ALL SORTS.

A Minnesota man makes
the winter seem short by Civ
ing his note payable in the
spring. 1.>er
"All the girls are becoming
vegetarians. They wear turn
up hate And reddish noses
and cherry lips.
When a dead man is spo-
ken of as the late Smith. d
the inference is that he did
not die early enough.
It is a pitiful sight TO see
a house fly get out of bed
these mornings and hang a
round the cook stove to warm
his heels. 8
Editors never get high, oh,
no; yet there is one feller run
ming a paper at Cerro de Pas
co, on the slope of the Andes,
$4,000 feet above the sea.
The band played "lit.le
brown Jug at the prohibitory
ratification meeting in Wor-
cester. Z - o1
The appearance Of spirits is
doubted by many men; but
no one questions the disap-
of Bourbon. 4
Mrs. Polk, widowof the
tenth President Of the United
States, still lives She is 4 slen-
der, graceful old lady, with
snow white hair and bright
eyes.
, 1875-01-07

wLEpaEMENr.-The managers
Of the "Sing verein Germania." re-
quest US to make their public acknowl-
ment to Mr.. John Collins. of the Occi-
dental Hotel. for the magnificent supper
he provided for them on the OCCASION Of
their Annual Ball. The entertainment
was alike creditable to the generosity Of
the landlord and the cuisine of the ho-
Sal
, 1875-01-07
Ladies' Nurse.

MRS. MASON, AN EXPERIENCED AND
WI accomplished Ladies' Nurse, offers her
services to the ladies' of Seattle and feels conf
dent Of giving satisfaction in her vocation. 4
~ Patronage respectfully solicited. w
Residence at Mrs. f.. v. Wyckoffs. where she
may be found whsn not personally engaged.
Dec .4-pd-1m
, 1875-01-07
D.rp.-John Wallace. The young mar
who was 70 badly injured lately = Pert
Blakely, died on Saturday at DIR. Weeds
hospital, and was buried on Sunday.

q Hon. Philip Ritz, of Walls Wal
L. made us flying visit on Tuesday.
He i now an active friend of .he Seattle
and Walla Walla Railroad, as he was
formerly of the Northern Pscfc Rail.
road.
, 1875-01-07
PILE DRIVER
=" "Dtck Atkins"
DOUBLE STEAM ENGINE)

DOUBLE STEAM ENGINE)
Best appointed ever on P iset Sound
rs NOW PREPARED TO BUILD
Wharves, drive Foundations for
Stone or Brick Buildings; drive Pils
Trestling for Railroads, and to load Ves-
sells with Spars. Piles or TfCber, and
will 90 to any part of the Sound.
Address,
HA. ATKINS,
Seattle. W.T..
n B-Cargoes Of Piles furnished on SHIRT
, 1875-01-07

There is no plural to Daddy
Longlegs, as it's always been
regarded as a singular crea-
ture.
There's a man who keeps a
list of all the banks in the
country so as to be able to say
that he keers a bank account
Some of the students al
Eastern colleges can board
themselves for thirty-five cts
a week, but they don't feel
like tearing around much.
An English minister says
that "If Scripture said one
thing and the London Times
another, 500 persons out q
every $40 would believe the
Times.
John Erode is no more. You
probably don't know him. He
lived in Western Missouri, and
on entering the smoke house
Of a friend to see how the
hams got alorg a trap gun
blew his head off.
Tricks In All Trades.-lt
is discovered that private
Coachmen in London are in
the habit of ofsurreptitiously ad-
ministering chloral to spirited
horses in their charge, so rem
der them easily manageable.
Mark Twain says since he
has become a director in an ac-
cidental insurance company,
the Hartford, accidents have
assumed /. kindlier aspect. l
look upon a cripple now with
affectionate interest as an ad-
vertisement. To me there is a
charm about a rail road collis-
ion that is unspeakable.
American women that mar
ry counts aud other poverty
stricken titles in Europe are
now designated as foolasses,
Mrs. Lincoln says she has
never seen a man that she
would marry. Shed 60 to the
poor house first.
Ida and Gabrielle Greely,
daughters of Horace Greely,
have again entered society
and rather like it.
Getting drunk is a serious
affair in Liverpool. They
print the names and occupa-
ton every Monday of all
who get "off" during the
week.
A whole family is in the Ohio
insane asylum. The cause Of
their trouble has not been
ascertained, but sometime in
the long ago, Mrs. Livermore
and Susan B. Anthony visited
at their house and stayed a
week.
Those who have lived and
run in debt since last spring
on the strength of owning a
ticket in the Louisville lotte-
ry, will find it pretty hard
squeezing through the win
ter.
Silence is always a good
hing when you have nothing
to say, but somehow people
who talk the most say the
least.
What is the difference be-
tween a church organist and
the hay fever? One stops the
nose and the other knows the
stops. sl.z.
Hitherto-H Honored men of
wealth, residing near Holidas-
burg, Pa, have been discov-
cred to be allied with a gang
of horse thieves.
Another argument in favor
of tobacco. A Vermont farmer
who was attacked by a bear
dosed Bruins eyes with fine
cut and thus saved his lie.
The pretty French fashion
of wearing a band Of wide
black velvet ribbon around the
neck is in vogue again. Maid
ems with crane-like necks
are exceedingly grateful!
, 1875-01-07

~ Mr.. c. n. Swan, son of our es-
teemed friend, Judge J. G. Swan, OF
Port Townsend. is travelling in Europe
~ad writing very interesting letters TO
his father, which are mainly reprcdsc-
cd in the Argus. Their perusal is worth
more than the subscription price Of that
paper.
~ Union Prayer Meeting at tho
Baptist Church on Tuesday and We'd
nesiay evenings; at the Congregational
Church ON Thursday and Friday even
ings of this week.
, 1875-01-07

x1LusIyKLr TO THE DAILY DISPATCH.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1875-10-14

There is curious experiment which
any one who is the possessor OF roos-
ter can try for himself with success and
which has never been positively ex-
planned. It is an ancient one. in fact
It Is two hundred years and over old,
since it was commented upon by Kir-
cher in 1916. Still it is none the less
curious, and almost as much subject
of speculation now as it was when
first observed. It is perform
ed thus Select dark-colored
table with smooth top; place it SO
that narrow streak Of sunlight will
fall across the surface. The sunlight
is not absolutely material to success !,
but we have found the desired result to
be more quickly obtained when It is
present. Then set the rooster on the
table, and hold Ms head down SO that
his beak comes in contact with the
wood. Now, with q piece of chalk
and in the sunlight, draw . line straight
from the birds beak, as represented IN
our engraving. Move the chalk very
tslowly, and by the time the line 10 Z
Ecouple Of feet In length the rooster will
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1875-10-14

fall into q cataleptic or trance-like con-
dition; and although the hands are re-
moved from his body, he will remain
perfectly rigid for q minute or two. It
is said that q black line on a white sur
face will produce the same effect. Hens
may be similarly treated, but it takes
much longer to get them into the trance
state, it being necessary to hold the
head down several minutes before they
come under the influence IN ri
This phenomenon is termed hypnot-
ism, or the result Of q curious sleep
producing property incident to,the fxa-
ton Of the attention upon some bright
object. It is by some considered .
partial paralyzation of the brain. = The
same can be done upon human beings.
The person should fix his eyes stead
fastly on any gittering object. say a
disk of silver paper, fastened on q
black surface and brought within ten
inches of his face, for about twenty or
thirty minutes. A state of torpor SUI
pervenes, during which, & the limbs
be gently raised, they will rigidly re-
main as placed. Surgical operations
have been performed under these con-
ditions without causing suffering to the
patient - Scientific An'erican.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1875-10-14
A Philanthropic Doctor.

"What's the good word, Doctor?"
go, fine times, my boy, assure you.
Lots OF fever and ague; sell lots OF qui-
nine and chill medicine; every thing
prosperous, my boy"
+" Do you think the crops will be in
jured by the heavy rainfalle''
"Not particle, sir. Best thing that
could have happened. Never was such
a demand for chill medicine. Farmers
will shake little, of course, but it'll
do 'em good, my dear sir, do 'em good.
They want something to stir 'em up.
You see, my dear fellow, Providence
knows what he's about. Sends down
rain, then chills come. Then, my dear
fellow, we step in with our chill cure,
make an honest penny, and every body
is happy. Nothing like it, my boy,
assure you. When patent medicines
are lively, every body is comfortable,
my dear sir. .''-Louisrille Commercial
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1875-10-14

A CHILD was brought before hu-
name magistrate, according to a Japa-
nese story, charged with the capital
crime Of killing q wild duck in the inn
mense preserves of Shogoun. The
magistrate expressed the opinion that
the duck was only stunned, and gave
the parents day to cure it, in which
case the child would be acquitted. This
comforted the father but little, but the
mother sensibly went and bought the
finest live duck she could find which
the magistrate accepted with smile
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1875-10-14
THE CHESTNUT TREE.

BY +. W. BOURDILLON.
p.re and brown was the chestnut tree,
%hsr he went, my lover, away from me.
A. X sl under the branches brown and bare
"a nromised again to meet me there.
NH and blossom, sweet chestnut tree,
And bring my lover again to. me.
N. hloom was white on the chestnut tree,
wSen BE came, my lover, again to me.
Rut be came with . curse, for q rivaps guile
Ssore TO another gave my smile.
Tr,n flower to fruit, sweet chestnut tree,
And turn my lover again to me.
- yipe pods fell from the chestnut tree
VIA be came again, but not for me.
rnr Nv false, false rival was at his side
Ind ia church-bells rang for the worthy
bride.
chower down thy dead leaves, chestnut tree
Ana hurry my broken heart and me.
Independent.