The star. (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1874-1875, 1875-03-19
GOSSIP

Let other children sneer and laugh
At photographic rule.
| But me that better way still lead
| Til perfectly spell:
So may shun the path that leads
| TO where Josh Billings tell.
| Another sign Of Spring-Our jays re
| turning. a'.p
suburbans have soft thing on mud
just now.
| The Indian chief Bad Axe is up in the
Chip-away country.
| A nice motto for an umbrella handle
Many happy returns.
| In Spain they arrest men for lying. II
1t were an offense here, who would be
turnkeysP
A troupe in London is called the "Mo.
| hawk Minstrels." They sing SO as to
| lit your hair.
A pawnbroker offers large lot of sill.
ver-plate atauction. 1T will be strictly
Jew-dish-all sale.
| The saying, "excuse haste and a bad
pen," has been attributed to q pig who
ran away from home.
Tue Bost0nian mark of nobility is 9
wart at the end of the nose, with three
hairs sprouting out of it.
lt ISN'T loud praying which counts with
the Lord SO much as giving four full
| quarts for every gallon.
Mark Twain SAYS the Sandwich Island
ers are generally as unlettered as the
| other side OF tombstone.
In some things we are all kin. How
ever thoroughly man falls ON the ice, he
never looks around for admiration.
The Allegheny raised one foot last
| night. When it raises the other there
VIII be big run.-Pittsburg Leader.
IL. Il
ana regrets his club he may be pacifi6d
by club at home. Apply it under the
left ear.
Under the common law in Georgia a
man with twelve-inch Bowie-knife in
his hand has right to smoke wherever
he pleases.
When a Chicago man, gets rich, he
writes to Eastern publishing houses and
tells them to send "half ton of books
with gilt on"
A hen Of any sort of enterprise who
Wopt resume business when eggs are
thirty-five cents a dozen, ought to have
|, been born a rooster.
An Oregon debating club has decided
that iron is more useful to man than gold.
We've got a. lot of old iron we'd like to
change OFT with that crowd.
He was drunk; very drunk. He pied a
ease OF nonpareil, and wanted to know
II we had any ready made funeral no.
tices that would fit his dead cousin.
Perhaps the Cincinnati Gazette is not
dull paper, but when we hear man
who reads the P1ttsburg papers speak
ing OF il as dull, what are we to think?
Flowers will be the principal trimming
for hats this season, but it will be well
to stick on any portable article that hap
pens to be lying about while you are
dressing.
Tilton's mere school girl, according to
Rufus Il. Holmes, was lnsty woman of
twenty-seven or eight. Perhaps school.
elsewhere. 4
Plnchbacks anxiety about the injury
which has been done his name is need.
less. II ne were in the Senate and
"arose Dy any other name" ne would
smell as sweet.
Eyes, she's got lovely ear" said a
Milwaukee blade, ih reply to a compli-
mentary remark about lady friend.
"Dut you ought to see it when she let's it
out in f1y-time."
In Beloochistan, when q girl agrees to
marry young man and then flunks out.
his mother can lawfully claim one of the
maldens ears, and the maiden can walk
off on the other.
b4.UD
to $1,000 each. The close approximation
between the value of an average .rhi-
noceros and an average Congressman is.
to say the least, striking.
The strongest evidence of the intelli-
gence and culture of the citizens of Pom
peii is the discovery by the excayators
OF a woman making fire in a cook stove.
while her husband is in bed and asleep.
A kersauqu, Iowa, lawyer adyertises
thai ne mas lost a ''leather buggy cushion,
somewhat worn." The question that
agitates the public is, what made the
cushion buggy, and where did he wear
it. szsss
DR.. Hunter, OF. st. Petersburg, has dis
covered that the atmosphere of theater
contains six times as much carbonic acid
gas as it ought to. That is why the
young gentlemen are forced to go out be-
tween the acts to see man.
How doth the little busy pig improve
each shining hour, and gather sausages
all day from every opening flower. And
when The shades OF twilight fall, he slum-
bers in his sty, or sings his pretty evening
hymn, "Root, little pig, or die."
Street car conductors complain that
women are becoming too intelligent, aud
that they are abandoning the time-hon.
ored habit OF swinging off moving car,
facing. the rear. The poor conductors
plaintiyely ask if the position is to be
deprived of all it's attractions.
xsOne Of the Chicago newspaper men
Visiting the city yesterday, being asked
by a friend what the people in that city
think OF the Beecher scandal. he replied
that he never tried it, and didn't know
anything about it--that he and all his
neighbors burn kerosene.
In Aberdeen, Scotland, policeman
was recently passing a house late in. the
evening, when he heard a woman scream-
ing, "Oh, HenryI Henryl come here
quickl Susanl motherl the baby!' Gal
lantly breaking in the door and rushing
up stairs, the officer found that the baby
had just cut a toothl
An Indian0la young man, aged 15. be-
came infatuated with a lady of the North
Carolinians, slave singers, and followed
the company of. The juvenile lovers
father 0verhauled. the young man and
famed the flames of the immortal pas
sion out Of the young heart with barrel
staye.
sit can not be denied,o says Judge
Mott, in.deciding the application of MIS-.
Lockwood for the right to practice as
lawyer in the Court OF Claims at Wash
ington, Fthat the masculine gender
which is generally used in the statutes J
frequently embraces the feminine" Well,
we should think it did-eyery time it gets
chance.