The star. (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1874-1875, 1875-01-26
GOSSIP.
Oh, where is Mr.. Owen now
Where has that false, false lover strayed,
Who used to praise Kate's bonny brow
And say her face

Who used TO praise hate's Donhy proW
And say her face
Was full Of graceP
Alas, that she should be betrayed!
"Sally, at what time do your iolks
diner "Soon as you go aWay-thats
missus' ORDERS"
'Oh, tell me where is fancy bredW
sighed the poet, and the practical BOY
said, "Here, mister, in the bake shop"
"Sarah was good wife," said Geor- |
gian, speaking OF his late better hall,
"but she never did do a shirt UP real
nice."
Nasty, the konfedrit preacher, informs
us that "Hash liz like faith, the sub |
stance ov things hoped for, and the evil
dence ov things not seen."-Josh Bill
ings.
a Louisville divine, recently praying,
said, "Oh, Lord, give unto us neither
poverty nor riches," and pausing sol
emnly a moment, he added, especially
poverty"
A disrespectful son asked his father:
"Why is neighbor Smiths liquor shop
like counterfeit dollarW 81 can't tell,
my son." "Because you can't pass it,"
said the boy.
An old clergyman spying boy creep.
ing through fence, exclaimed: "Wh nat
crawling through fence Pigs do that"
"Yes," retorted the boy, sand old hogs
60 along the street.
1t looks bad to see dog preceding his
master down the street TO the first sa-
loon he approaches. 1t shows there is
something wrong, something lacking,
deplorable tendency on the part OF the
dog.
A Clifton swell dropped-not his card,
as he would have done earlier in the day
but little note from his washer-wo-
man dunning him t0r that 'little bill
which you've bin owen at me morn
year."
Nlisprints will present themselves in
other columns besides those of newspa-
pers. The author OF temperance nov
ell who wrote, 'Drunkenness is folly"
| was horritied to read, drunkenness is
jolly.n
| A Mt. Auburn man says that when his
wife gets up IN the morning with jerk,
and, negleoting to do up her hair, goes
silently about her work, she is materla al
izing domestic row which before night
will shake the house to its foundations.
| "Where's the molasses, Bill?" asid a
red-headed woman sharply TO her son,
who had returned with an empty jug.
sN one in the city, mother. Every groc-
cry has a big black board outside, with the
letters chalked on it-'N. U. MOlasses.'"
This Office keeps a boy who is paid fifty
dollars q week to do nothing but sit on a
chair and yell, "Shut the doorW Peo-
ple who come up stairs on business are
thus saved the pain of hearing seven OF
eight men yell out in succession.-De-
troit Free Press.
At a recent lecture young man read
a fine essay. On his way home from the
hall he heard an old lady remark to
another, as he walked behind them,
"Wasn't that fineW "Yes," was the re.
pIy. "but what q mean-looking little
wretch the lecturer wasp
i A Young scholar, the first day al
school. was asked her name by the teach
er, and replied. Her fathers name wai
!. the next question, and she did not know
his first name. The teacher then asked
her, "What does your mother call hlmF
swell, Charles, what do you want
nowp" Charley-"Oh, / want to be rich"
Uncle -"Rich! Why soW Charley
sBecause l want to be petted, and ma
J saws you are an old fool, and must be
petted because you are rich. But it's q
great secret and mustn't tell"
Pretty Sallie Adams, of Portland,
brought the man she loved to the popping
point by saying to him, while CLEANS o.
loye-light shot from her half-shut eyes
81 have had two offers OF marriage, The
= first did not please me, and, for the sec
COHu, IL udtC q douPSAcVAVAVuS- ASo"AS "
: for odd numbers"
Secretary Bristow will not allow his
lady clerks to sit with their heels tippeC
up on the window sills at lunch time
; and Superintendent Smith, of the Con
gressional Cemetery, won't let ladies' 81
, down ON the tOmbstones erected to the
memory of the deceased members O
Congress. How cruel is brutal man tt
J woman, and how unmindful OF her rights
Jonah is at once avenged and vindica-
ted by hog lately killed at Lafayette
Indiana, from whose stomach was taker
live fish, which died, however, some
time after, not having been restored t
its native element. But this was not thu
| hogs fault, who if he had lived Ions
4, enough, would doubtless have dealt al
: generously by the fish as the elder tsl
g did by Jonah.
j A man took seat on the head of al
empty flour barrel, and remarked: I"
got down the gun and loaded her W
!, heavy, and just as l was" At thi
: point the head tell in, and the man o
;. about half Of him, disappeared, whll
his legs loOmed up like schooner
= masts. He was helped out and bo
F.; hired to rub sweet. oil ON his back, bu
in spite of the earnest entreaties of til
crowd he would not 20 on with the story
s An old lady in Lockport recentl
' achieved eminence by carrying quart 0
q popped corn to donation party and eat
s ing two dozen fried oysters, a pound Q
!. crackers, three slices of fruit cake, hal
j. mince pie and some apples, alter whic
e she was threatened with "spasm," an
in the effort to prevent it she sacrifices
all the wine there was in the house
= She attends donations regularly, an
: does good deal for the church in tha
!, way.
v A Negro man, while fishing in Gree
u River last summer, caught a large cal
n fish. Wishing to 60 further up the rive
0 he put string through the gilis OF th
: fish, tied it to root in the water an
n went on. In short while another negr
/ came along who had caught small cal
o fish. Seeing the large fish he excnanget
q leaving his and taking the ouher. TX
J. ward evening the first fisherman return
ling, stopped to get his fish. Taking
out Of the water and seeing very sma
s. one instead of the large one he had lef
t. he said, ''Dis amt my fish; yet it mus
l. be, for it's on my string; but lars mai
o sa how he's swunk."
r A drayman yesterday unloaded bal
A rel of -four on the front step OF hous
IS on Sixth street, and the woman OF th
). house went out to roll 1t in. The parre
h Woo about on iurh IOnpQr than the Widt