The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1875-06-25
A Convenient Memory.
BY JOSH


Some folk are blessed with q very
good memory, some with very poor
one, but many have a convenient mem>
DRY. A memory that brings to your
mind just things as you desire, at the
very time you want them, or, fails to do
so when you don I want them, is a con
venient memory. Yoa see at a glance,
that such memory as this is as handy
as a monkey wrench or small change to
a man; or fainting (sic), or headache, to
a woman.
The convenient part Of memory is
composed of the parings of truth, an
not unfrequently of the whole truth
This form Of convenience is express ed
by the phrase, Il forgot" Now, in many
instances, there is just about as much
truth in this a. in another phrase much
used in socicty-"Not at home" In
the former case your remembrance de-
ponds upon sO5at is wanted, and your
visibility in the latter, upon tcho wants
you. II many instances, in both cases,
downright white lying has been resort
ed to-
a loving. dutiful husband starts to
town on Saturday evening, his better
half says, Il wish you would get Some
checks to make the little girls some
aprons; and please get me bottle of
snuff. Now, don't forget, de ar" He
them, slick as a ribbon Had so much
business to attend to- He din't forget
a bottle of whisky AMI a pound oftobac-
co He goes to church some Sunday,
and it happens that collection is taken
up for some good purpose, and the hat is
pres ented to him. He looks very much
! confused, and says, You must excuse
me, really, have forgotten my pocket
book" Upon his return, his wife, who
had to stay at home and miud the chil>
dren, aud get dinner, says, What for a
sermon did Mr.. &. preach to-day 2 i
didn't think it was much" quoth he.
"What vas the text?' continued she
80, bother 1 forget, fact IS, could
hardly keep awake " The truth was,
the minister hal got next to him on a
few things and be didn't l0aHt to re-
member But he remembered that
Miss was dressed out of the ashes
and that he had given sum towards a
barbecue.
1t IS sometimes convenient t. borrow
your neighbors tools to end some
thing, and forget to take them back
when done with them Now, l dont't
know whether he should b. blamed r
this, or not, for one loses some time in
going after them, aud it would be rather
zoo hard for him to lose as much more
to take them home-espeeiaUy in a busy
time. Let him who loaned come after
them 4 convenient memory serves It's
owner in other ways. n entleman
GENES into a neigh D Orhood and sp!urges
around for time, then suddenly leaves
without sayin goodbye to any body,
forgetting to pay his b ard and some
other little bills. Occasionally some per-
sons who fill places Of honor, trust ard
profit, are blessed with a CONVENE ut
memory, and make a misuPplica.ion of
the public funds Bat this has become
quite fashionable, and is locked upon,
IN certain quarters, more Us a qualifica-
ton for office, than other wise. Cunvcn-
fence Of memory sometimes assn mes n,
other and quite opposite forw It makes
you remember wha: you had forgotten.
Your neighbor asks you TO help him roll
few logs, or raise O house, CT, it may
be, to meet other neighbors, and put up
the fence around the crop Of a widow
lady, which the storm had blown down.
When the day arrives you remember
that you hsd promised 10 meet Jones
some - here, on some particular business,
but yeu never would have thought Of il,
if it had not been for putting NJ that
fence
Your neighbor's family, or some mem
Der Of it, is sick, and needs some help to
sit up with them. You remember thatit
is hurtful 70 yon to lose sleep the loss Of
one nights sleep makes you sick for
week. Now, you know that you can sit
up till midnight, every other night in
the week, playing euchre or reading a
red>backed novel, and never complain in
/ the lesst,
Thus have | given few Of the many
Illustrations CT a convenient memory
Those Of q curious or cynical turn of
mind, may supply others.