Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1875-12-30

by the size door anu Tattlcu Tue Stove
around and kicked things about until the
bell rang, when he brought out prisoner.
WANTED TO GO HOME.
"Say, you, want to go homer ex-
claimed Aaron Wallace, as he came
through the door.
Mr.. Wallace, we are always wanting.
The man who wrote Man wants but little
here below didn't live a great while,
because they sent him to lunatic
asylum"
",But must be off on the early train
persisted the prisoner.
What uain?''
For Klumbus."
"There are many sad thoughts con-
nected with your case" said His Honor, as
he leaned back and tossed a chestnut from
one hand to the other.
THAT train will go, Judge, and leave
me herep'
II think it will Many trains Will
come and go without regard to you You
came here stranger, thinking to settle in
Detrolt--in the only city in the world where
a grocer will give you a box Of soap if you
hint to him that he puts sand in his sugar.
You lied to people, had fight in a street.
Car, got drunk, and the way you became
settler was to settle down in the mud /"
"Pll give million dollars to get out Of
thisn' exclaimed the prisoner. ssa
IL don't doubt it, MIR. Wallace, but the
die is cast-the mold is prepared-the
silver cord Is loosened, and you go up for
thirty days.
"Oh! Whack! You don't mean it, do
your
Mr.. Wallace, cannot tell lie"
"Ivegot to go home-I must go-I will
go!'
BE calm, Mr. Wallace; you are a red
faced man with an unusually large jugular
and excitement might bring on a stroke of
apoplexy."
''I'll-hold on-dumit-stop pinch
ing!" shouted the prisoner as Bijah drew
him into the foggy atmosphere of the
waiting room.
Emeline Arnold, did you strike your
husband with a poker?" asked the Court
of square .shouldered woman without
any hustle on.
"And what did he do"' she squeaked
" The poker question takes the prefer
ence, Mrs. Arnold Did you play poker
on his head ?"
" You don't know what have to stand
from him!",
Answer my question Mrs Arnold. d"
" If you knew that man as do, Judge.
had thirty six dollars in cash when we
were married, five years ago, and he has
run through with every dollar of itr'
Tne-poker-the pokerw
Well, l did hit him. she replied,
E,I ,J -,
what did he do-answer me that!"
IL can't do it,"
"Well, sir, he kicked cat that has
been in our family for three yearsr'
Is Mr.. Arnold here :" asked the Court,
locking over the audience.
Mr. Arnold, with his head bound up,
had been waiting to swear against his
wife, but suddenly overtaken with re-
morse he rushed out of doors as the Court
called.
Mrs Arnold, you may go home"
said His Honor, land il you feel it your
duty to strike your husband with poker
occasionally suppose l can't help it."
WHAT HE HAD TO SAY.
Jonas h. Sweetwater, you are charged
with imbibing too much fire. water, and
water you got to say about ite" asked the
Court
Blamed sly" replied the prisoner, in
a hollow voice
II may be, Jonas, but don't couch
your belief in such language. We will
have the officer sworn"
Il want lawyer" exclaimed the
prisoner,
What for?'
ITO knock the underpnning out from
under this hash housed"
MIR. Sweetwater, the English language
| offers large variety of words more suita,
| bic than you are using"
| Well, now, you let me out of here or
III make things buzz
| What thatY
| I'm make this old caravansary red
| hotr said Jonas.
Jonas X. Nhatsyournamc, | fine YOU
$50 or send you up tor three months, and
II you have over two words 10 say about
| II I'll make it half a yearl"
| You will?"
You try it onn'
| They gaZed at each other
| The boys rose up from behind theStove
| Jonas h. wanted to, but didn't, and
BUah led him away Detroit Free Press
Advice 10 Members of COOPERATIVE
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