The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1875-05-08

A yOG nav SOOA D1''eC~ ~ =
and cherish her with all your
heart. IF you have none, why
then love the sister of some other
man.
st. Joseph, Missouri, is consider
ed a good place in which to hold
church conferences. There "eve-
rything is lovely y" and the "chick-
ems roOst" low.
There are nine ladies in Iowa
entitled by law to pop the ques-
ton just as many times as they
have mind TO. They are COun-
ty School Superintendents of Edu-
cation,
Fashionable invalids in Florida
are represented as having charm
ing time, dancing, yachting, eat
ing fresh vegetable, shooting alli-
gators. denying the allegation,
smashing their medicine bottles,
throwing away their crutches,
and conducting themselves gen.
orally in a jubilant manner.
The Territorial Enterprise, Of
Virginia, Nevada, is published
"daily, Mondays excepted" This
day is excepted because. Sunday
is fighting-day in Nevada, and it
is always uncertain whether edi-
tors there will be alive by night
to prepare next days paper.
An English lecturer, speaking
of our politics, says: The curse
of America was its utter unspeak-
able political corruption. Wash
inptnn was den of thieves.
where the Senator was bought
and the legislator bribed; and the
whole thing was the biggest job
berry this world has ever yet seen
"Mr. Speak Mr., Speakah,
/ rise to q pint u 0'dah Dar's the
man what d0ua it. Eiaculafed
q member o. ..v = Arkansas -lleais-
lature, as he shook one hand
frantically at the gallery and
mopped his head with the other.
"Dat dar cussed white man jes
done spit down on top o. my
head.'
1t is reported that a man went
home about three O'clock the 9TH
er morning, and using his UNI. :.
brella for a billiard cue, smote his
sleeping wife in the short rib,
crying "POolw and sank into
sweet slumber. He has since ex-
planned to his wife that women
can have no idea how the care
of business will sometimes affect
a mans brain.
London has a new industry.
A man advertises himself as
''KuOcker-up and window tickler,
from three to seven" He wakes
heavy sleepers who wish to get
up early. Window tickling is
waking without ringing the bells
BY means of a long pole, with
which he taps on the window
pane.
What changes a few years bring
about, don't they? Yesterday
the citizens of Arber Hill were
aware of a woman ,madly tearing
alon@ nntata masher in hand.
giving chase 70 her husband who
vas Tying from her presence ike
Il Geer. Eighbvears ago the same
female took : medal 81 an Eastern
seminary for a graduating essay
on "RepOse of Character"
Apro pose Of the Tyudaii-I3arwin
uneOTi65 LutEl0s II. o..o - General
Schenck's stories that he told to
the wife of a British Cabinet of.
fcer.t who assured him that "En-
gland made America all that she
+ - 'sPardOn, Madam said the
General, ''yOu remind me of an
Ohio lad In his teens, who attend
! ing Sunday school for the first
time, was asked by the teacher"
'Who made you?' Made me"
YES. sWhy, God made me about
SO long, (holding his hands ten
| inCheS aparbly Dub Sfo"ou Uiio
rest.'"
| The other day an old fellow from
IDelaware, going West on a Michi-
gan Central train. stepped off the
coach when it reached Ypsilanti,
and slipping on the icy platform,
went down and broke a leg. Ev-
erybOdy sympathiZed with him
in his misfortune, but he waved
his hand, and replied, "lt's all
! riPh mo one to blame but N.Y.
/ self. My old woman was laid up
for two years, and now Pve got a
chance TO get even with her. If
she don't have % do some tall
busting around and sitting up
nights, then my name isn't Jor-
dan -