, 1875-10-02
The Weekly Argus.
BAGI.EY SLEEPS OFT.


few evenings since, for he knew
if the fact became public that he
would be serenaded, and Of course
he did not wish this. He succed-
ed in keeping the matter a pro,
found secret for nearly week.
when he was greatly astonished q.
hear his friend Grinies say, as he
slapped him familiarly On the
back
How is it, Bagley? / under
stand you aremarried. Is ita fact:
Well, yes, hesitated Bagley,
staring concernedly at his interlo-
cutor. .f- -c--.
Ofcourse you viii be serenaded,
and it won't be by an authorized
band, either. ---~
Bagley listened to this with
quaking heart. He had Aattered
himself that all was yet unknown; T;
and now to have it come out like
this. What could he do? On his
way home a thought struck him,
and he exclaimed NJ
Ahal I've got them now. III
have my wife go and sleep with
her mother tonight, while I sleep
at friend Thrasher's. Then what
a good joke it will be when they
come with their horns, tin-pans,
ETC., and discover that we are
away. Ha, ha, he, he, and shak-
ing with uncomfortable merriment
he hurried into the house, and to
his Mfess iRquisifve look, he ex-
plaiued that they were to be sere-
naded, but that he had devised a
plan for their escape.
Sothat night, between the hours
of ten and twelve, BaeIey and bis
wife sailed out into the night air,
Mrs. Bagley going in the direction
of her mothers and Mr.. Bagley in
the direction of Thrasher's.
Immediately on his arrival, he
boldly ascended the steps, and
knocked for admittance. But be
received no answer. Concluding
they were asleep, he redoubled
his exertions but no one came tc
the door, fEF g "a ~
He 4asia : qeandary. whAi
should he do9
Oh, l have it, he muttered,
viii 90 to the barn and sleep on
the haysand before anyone is up
I will reflrn home. H. ~
He had no trouble in mounting
the scaffold and in ashort time his
ponderous snoring reverberated
through the building.
Now t 50 happened that Bagley
was unusually sleepy, and instead
Of freeing himself from the arms
Of Morpheus before morning, be
slept till s am. El
He was taken aback at what he
had done, but thinking be could
readily escape without being OBJ
served, he commenced to descend
the ladder. NJ izt
He was inwardly congratulating
himself on his success, when 4
voice smothered in laughter, said:
Well, I declare, Bagley, this is
a pretty FIX for = pcWly-married
man
But here the voice of Bagley
said Hushl
The speaker paused, and Bag.
ley drnV bis purse, and said:
Thrasher, now look here,
know what you think BY your
pleased look.
Yes, you were confident Of .
serenade last night, and 50 lodged
out.
But look here, keep mum and ]
viii give you ten dollars.
AUI0tL. |IrII-t Fl II |IfI| lI i.
Bagley paid the sum and started
of; when be got half way home
he overheard two men taking.
Ithought the thing was agreed
onlast night me says to the other
Il was; but il rained = little
90 we postponed it till tonight.
Bagley went on Rl.n his heart
in bis mouth, he had uselossly lair
out one night and now be musl
repeat it. So when he got home
be told bis wife how ii was, and
do you believe Il reader, that lor.
ing couple-Bagley and Amanda
slept mi different houses two
nights more. lIii.
They were not serenaded; and
months after be learned that those
two men were talking about some
other man Then, to make mat.
ters worse, that little ten dollar
affair leaked out, and now Bagley
swearS that when he gets married
again, he is going 70 the Arctic
regions.