Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1875-11-10
AT THE TOMBS.
A Puzzled Court Seeking Various Devices
From the N. Y. World

A Puzzled Court Seeking Various Devices
From the N. Y. World.
sEva Sutton" cried Sergeant Quinn,
at the Tombs yesterday, in voice
from which al traces of emotion had
vanished, and in response to the chal-
lenge, there hobhled from the pen a
hearty young woman in gaudy dress.
With his usual sympathies with the
halt and lame, the Judge inquired of
the prisoner when she had hurt her
leg.
About six months ago" was the re-
spouse.
And do you suffer much from it
now, Eva?' asked the compassionate
Court.
"Not much now, Your Honor" re-
Piled the prisoner, as the tears which
the tender words evoked purled down
her too roseate cheeks.
"None whatever? pursued the
Judge.
.'No, Your Honor; since four months
you could stick a pin in it, and I
wouldn't feel it.
j" Paralyzed ?" queried the Judge.
"No, Your Honor"
''No rheumatic pains when the winds
east 2"
"None, Your Honor
"a most singular case" said the
Judge, becoming more and moreinterest-
ed, 81 must say, most extraordinary.
How do you account for it, prisoner ?"
Well, Your Honor" said the girl,
81 don't know, unless, maybe, it's be-
cause it's cork leg
"Silence in the Court" shouted
Sergeant Quinn, as he glowed upon the
audience. who had the bad taste to
laugh, and jerked dozen grinning
boys into the street.
Now, Thomson" said the Judge
testify to the testifying officer, "these
indictments must be carefully worded.
Who ever heard of person striking
another with the leg? People kick
with their legs; they don't STRIKE"
"She did, Your Honor" insisted the
officer; I" she had that cork leg in her
hand when l.
Ten dollars or ten days." growled
the Judge, and as he saw the woman
limp off grinning. after paying her fine,
he felt like calling her back and MAX
ing it 500.
SOLOMON ECLIPsED.
Hwang Lee and All Wing, said His
Honor, as he bent rather low brow
upon pair of Celestials who stood be-
fore him. "What do you say to the
charge of disorderly conduct brought
against you ?"
"Ah Wing he lun away my dog"
pleaded Hwang Lee.
Hwang Lee whatee Mclean man
callee damlire. Hwang Lee Gomez my
laundly, stealee my dog all like Mclean
man damtief," pleaded All Wing.
els it not remarkable" said the
Judge, s. that these stranger people, SO
far behind the civilized world in many
respects, yet possess in common with
us an affection for the lower animals
I must discover to which of the prison
srs the quadruped rightfully belongs,
and that, too, by means of q strategy
once employed by somewhat famous
biblical predecessor. Officer Brown,
bring the dog and meat-axe into
Court.
It was done.
Lee," resumed the Court, assuming
ID stJio VI PRONUNCIATION uGdub TO De
clearly comprehensive. sOficer,
choppee dogee in twoee. All Wing
takee halfee and Hwang Lee takee
halfee Understandee 2"
Apainful silence was at last broken by
All Wing, who remarked calmly, "Allee
light, Judge, SO officer give me halfee
got EN- dogs Ibis in him.
Affection has spoken in silence, ;"
said the Judge, trirmphantly; let
Hwang Lee have the dog"
Yankee Judge" said the prisoner,
as he lifted up the obese animal. 'sAh
Wing he not havee dambite; Hwang
Lee eatee dog all up SELF
Give dollars or five days each, !"
said the Disguised. Judge, as his esti-
mate of the celestials in hnman nature
fell down TO zero.