Ottumwa weekly courier. (Ottumwa, Wapello County, Iowa) 1872-1899, 1875-02-17
OTTUMWA, COUNTY. IOWA. FEBRUARY
LOOKING ron THE LEc,sLAruRE.
A Pfcture that May IMterest Our T.,
kfYO AlNleNmena

- EkLluEc tUWt WI ny NOtSHG8t VUk 11ElMa
bryO Statesmen
From the Detroit Free Press.
Yesterday noon man about sixty.fiye
years OF age came up stairs into the local
room Of this paper, aud inquired:
sis this whar the Legislashur is2''
''No, sif," replied the reporter; ssthe Leg
islature is in session at Lansing"
"Way of thar, eh T. continued the man as
be sat down, laid his cane across the table.
and took off his mit,ens.
"1es; trains run twice day. Pretty
good crowd ont there BY this time"
Il don't care bout the crowd" said the
old man, ~ want lava new law
"Eh?"
"Yes, sir, want a new law,-suthin' to
protect old men, like me.r
whats the matter,--how do you want
to be protected 2"
"My names Horner, replied the man. as
he slowly fumbled inside his coat. 0My
names Horner, and Pm an old foeli What
do you think ] done three months ago .
Went and married girl nineteen years old.
and red-headed at that! Yes, went and
decided her farm, and gin her six hundred
dollars cash, and married her I"
"And do you not live happy ~
"Happyl Young man, let ms show you
suthin-hefe, look q that!n
And be unrollsd piccs Of brown paper
and displayed handful Of gray hairs, some
of which were bloodstained.
"Pulled right out OF my scalp only three
days ago" he went on. "And see this
'ese leg n
He pulled mp his pants and exhibited q
black and blue spot just above the shin.
"Struck there with flat.iron,p hs ex.
planned /; t'meant to bit me on the chist and
kill me at once, but lodged. And see
herei"
He opened his coat and vest and revealed
the fact that he had no shirt on, and conse.
quently nothing on which to button his
collar,
"Tore it offn me two weeks sxorp he
whispered, and she burned up my other one.
I've bin round this way for fortnight, al
most dying by inches"
.Well, she must be . regular Wildcat
said the reporter.
"Young man, ii war to cit here and tell
ye how that woman conducts herrelf ye'd
have to hold yer hair down !" exclaimed the
old man, striking his leg. "No one knows
how she's heaved fat-irons at me. hit me
with clubs, throwcd water over me in bed,
pulled hair, Jawed 'rouLd, and brought my
gray hairs In sorrow to the grave! Why,
what do you think she called me this very
morning?'
"a cunlurango, perhaps.n
"Wuss'n that, boy-far, far wuss; she
called me IN Apollol"
"Possiblep
AYES, she did Think OF that, will ye-
think ot man Of my age, who has always
paid his debts and been honest, bein' set
down with pintes!'
"Its bad !" sighed the reporter, ~ long
pause ensued.
"It'sawful-the awfulest kind of awful |"
replied Homer. "I've got to stand it, but
want law TO protect other old men,-I want
. law to forbid any man over sixty from mar.
ryinf girl WHO 1snf over twenty"
THAT might be wise law
y can't 50 70 Lansin,," b. went on. ssbut
you kin help me. Pus it in your paper
get up an excitement bout il. viii you
do 1t Look at me, boy-look at me all
overt See how I've suffered See how hot
my head is!''
.tI'll help you all san."
tlKa3 4 dHyT I'm gein home Is meet Ter,
and BE- pounded around and sassed and law.
cd; but ] knew you're gestin' . law through
I'll 90 to the grave feelin' goodi'
And be put on his mittius, took mp his
cane, and was gone.