The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1875-01-23
The Sort of a Bridegroom an Old
Bachelor Makes.

i Young men and young women
you think that the divine intoxi
cation'of courtship is to last fol
ever. You think it is always go.
inc 70 he ar eeStatin pleasure tC
tgudge mile through mud and
rain TO buy Serphine Anne a pa
per Of pins. But this state OF
Things cannot last. Il is too high
! pressure. 1t must co0l down.
When you are married, and she
is yours and you are hers, and
| the novelty of the affair is over.
and you are fairly settled down
into ''old married folks" then
comes the test. Then if you have
been a Grabbed old bachelor, full
of little whimS, habits and pecu-
liarities as is the fretful porcupine
of quilts, then will come the tug
OF War. Do not you recOllect how,
when single, and you came home,
after some tedious business, heat
ed, tired irritable and disgusted
with the world, and got alone in
your room, that you used to fling
books and blaeking-brushes about,
and swear and thrash around for
an hour or two before you simmer
ed down into comparative calm
ness? Well, matrimony will not
cure thiS-at least at first. But
you must. not cut up so now.
Even a temporary raving man
lac is not a pleasant person for
any woman to be shut up alone
with; and if, on entering, She sees
trouble written on your face, aud
asks you, "What's the matter?"
and you reply. "Oh, nothing,"
because you don't want to be spok-
en- to, and above allhthings, it an.
noyS and irritates you to be so in
terrogated, and still she persists
in asking, What's the matter?"
and still you try to say, "Oh, moth
ing" as mildly as you can, only it
won't be said mildly, and it comes
OFT your tongue as a pistol shot,
and you would just then like to
bite somebody's head off. Oh,
Won { yOu at such d time wonder
where the amaiblity, the Oil, the
sugar, the honey, the sunshine Of
courtship has all gone TO? And
how Till you feel!-you who have
been 8ecustOmed to 60 in and out
Of your vile bachelors den with
o0t ilIIiry or hindrance? How
will you feel as you start to go out
for the purpose of getting a drink
around the corner, to hear her
say, "Where are you gOing~ and
every time it is asked you must
stand and rack your brain for a
new lie.
But l have learned great deal
during my short matrimonial car
rier. L would not have remained
single if only for the sake of the
information L have gained. L
know now, in the first place that
ones wife is never in the least
wrong. If there is row, it's you,
all you, every bit your fault. You
labor by the hour trying to make
her own up that there being one
pound avOrdupOiS or sixteen
ounces of blame between you, you
are willing to take fifteen ounces
of that blame, provided she will
shoulder the remaining ounce, T
and she won't. When she says |
she will be only fifteen minutes
getting ready to go out it means
an hOar, and when she says she's
all ready it means fifteen minutes
more for putting on the final
touches. She may never be con-
sidered really dressed until fairly
out af the house and around the
corner, and even then the chances
are that she's forgotten gloves or
handkerchief.
If there was a bedroom a mile
long, and her entire wardrobe
could be packed iB 6 DandbOZ, I
still you'd find portions Of that /
wardrobe scattered along the |
whole mile Of dressIn"-r0cc1. !
She's a NICE thing to iUOK at when /
put together but this wonderful /
creation is evolved from @ CuaOs |
interminaDie Of pins, ribbons, rags, |
powder. brushes, comDs ana Iaces. |
If there were 1000 drawers in
your room, and you asked but for |
one to be kept sacred and inviO-
late for your own private use, that
particular one would be full of
hair pins, ribbons and soiled cuffs.
Some provision, some protection
in this matter should be inserted
in the marriage service.
This is what she sent the school
master:
SDeer sir-My little boy is look
en- so bad and he don't complane
OF beein sick l am aired tu large |
boys plays so ruff with him will
you please see that they don't
stand him on his he'd and don't
lit them bee ruff with him he
crlde all mite before last with his
he'd cant git him to one that
enay OF them hirts him he wont
IL l.