New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1875-08-09
MOTHERS and DAUGHTERS.

MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS.
"a Mother" writing to us last week. urges
us to renew the discussion OF reform In the
education of girls. We really do not see that
perpetual moralizing on this subject tends TO
much practical good. If q girl who has reached
the age of sixteen has nothing within herself
or IN her home influences to teach her that
she is a bold vapid hoyden instead of the pure
and tender blossom of noble wemanhOOd which
she should be, or if her mother has never
found it out until this late day, a lecture from
TIE TRIBUNE or any other paper is not likely
70 convince them of the fact. The girls
brother has listened to thousands OF sermons
ut church and from the college desk to urge
him to keep clean mind in clean body;
but it is the wOrdless teaching about the hearth
or at the table at home; it is the example OF
the boys in his class; it is the fierce lash OF
decentralization after his first debauch Or
loss on betting-day, that keeps him from
drunkenness or degradation There has been
too much social legislation and harangung OF
late years about the training OF girls; indeed
we incline to think that the true we'll
wishors of wome would prefer that they,
like the coored people, should be let
alone. so far their social status is concerned,
to find their own place and prove their right
TO it. As it is, there is vague feeling that
something is wrong with the present genera
ton of girls, and that sharp decisive rem
edy for the nanclcss disease exists somewhere,
and ought to he found out. One man Is dis
g,lsted with the forward manners of school
girls whom he meets on the cars, or OF young
women who rub against his prejudices rs book
agents or female correspondents, and he pOurs
forth lamentations for the Old-time Domestic
Women and the system Of education used by
our grandHOthers; another finds the Domestic
Women not dcfunct ut all, but swarning and
insignificant as gnats. He never tires OF hold
ing up their tiirtatiOns, their fashiOn-boOks,
their Stiffness as girls and ignorance as mothers
to public scorn, and loudly urges Vassar,
women doctors, the rostrum, the ballOt-bOx,
etc, etc. One mother delights in watching
how her Mary James FREQ, frank manner
alarms all beholdcrs in the P.irsian salon or
the Campagna; it is proof, she declares, OF
a purity superior to the prurient prudery OF
Young girls Oh the continent. Her daughter
receives and visits unchaperoncd; that wo-
mans honor. she protests, is hardly worth
saving which requires the defense OF
duenna Her next door nrighbOr, shocked
by the want of decOrum in these vlr-
tuous but loud young women, adopts the
French management for her daughter She
shall be kept in cOnycntual retirement the
Advanced Female shall be to her thing I'M
known and abhorrcd should misfortune ever
oyerteke her, teaching or sewing must be her
sole resource; better feminine starvation than
masculine work or scuifing in the market
place.
Now one plan or method is not going to
convert all young girls into sensible finely
toned wOmanly women any more than one
system of diet or dosing will cure the diseases
of all mankind. Your moral or social hobby
rider ia as impracticable bore as the man
who would trOt all humanity out to Il sun
bath or choke them on Oatmeal p0rridsc. The
mere system of education in fact has Curl
oHsly shallow influence upon wo1nans cha,ac-
ter. We have seen the carefully secluded
daughters of strict disciplnarians burst out
into tnc world with tic character and man
ners of Cressida, and huckster girl stand
year after year in the market with simple
quiet modesty that commanded respect from
the grosscst men about her. Ii il absurd for
any mother who wishes to mold her daughters
into high type of womanhood to ask or
adopt any general rule. Blood has to be taken
into account, and blood often is the woightiest
quantity in the equation of tho problem-and
one but seldom counted. The restrctvoLne-
chanical treatment which would make a dutiful
saint out of the child of cOld-bloOded
uninaginative man would drive tho daughter
of his nervous, passionate, impressiOnable
ncighbOr headiOng to run. Besides the i'll
ovtable heritages of blood, there are countless
influences of social position, associations. acct
dents, which alter the temperament and tastes
and which must all be considered How can
aay general rule apply to these I Why should
we even make tho general rule that these
should be considered when so many mothers
are incapable OF even understanding their OK
istencei What system will enable snObbish,
light minded, underlined women to make gem
tlewomen of their daughters 7 We want the
mothers first of all mothers who take IT,.
love Of God, common sense and th..t long
sighted old power. Honor, as .nefr agents in
acting upon the woman.cnild that they have
brought into The world. Great help to almost
every cir. comes from that most wonderful of
all human forces, a mothers love, even if the
mother DO ignorant; and greater still, from
that force which is not human, and of which
wo speak with profOundest reverence, the
trust in God which belongs to women rather