The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1875-04-07
TTrala The AtlaE.a RCrah.1
a RoSence ofOu~ Uagrnmmatfcaf Re'

porter
The casual reader may notice that The fault
| less tiiction that adorps the columns OF The
| Herald Is iutcrspersed, once 10 while WITH
such scpts noes a, these: " He taken her ny
the hand" SIT vas he who done the deed
&C. Thc chastity Of the or,hogtaphy IS a'so
occasionally marred by the appearance OF
such strange, and vet familiar words as
"oncorc," "rcvynue,"" buddy" etc. We
feel that a discri oina,ipg public Is entitled
Ia some cxplaHalion Of these crudltles, ard
we ore not 10th to give II up.
! 1t Is all owing to our reporter, Jones. lie
is the man wnr does it. Jones has an ab"o-
lutte contempt for "tenseS," "mocos." and
those kindred subtletics Of speech, which
STANDARDIZATION has embroidered in an en-
tanglipg fringe upon our sturdy Anglo.
S4xoo. lie rises above the slippered elc-
aancc Of our 9ramm,rianS and stalks through
the br-ways CT speech with the breezy yigor
Of bsck@ooGs pioEeer. Picking bis teeth
Relatively with his bowic-knite ION when
the blood OF murdered "tcuses' still el!>-
| tepcdl. be remarked TO Us the other day,
when we bad expostulsted With him on the
recklcssucss OF his grammar: "Wben |
bayc wrote thing up cannot take the
time to look i! over. And, besides sheath
ing his knife, hang ii what's The dltier'
enaS"
As 10 photography Jones has but one rule.
When he il troubled about the spelling OF a
word be rises above the dstracting guesses
that force themselves on his mind, and Dal-
anciDs him eli calmly in the mid-alr, as you
have seen an humble bee do on thousand
law June afternoons, be darts straight at the
"sound" of it. Once whtn he was wrcst-
ling with the name Of the great German
| hea 1aSS huir from of
brow and wrote it down ' Wanpashek.'
He quietly meets all opposition to this air
line method OF spelling with the argument
which has been familiar to us ever sIDce we
were children, and which, by the way, We
have never yet been able to relute: i" Ii k'a
don't spell scat,' what do 1t spei!"
may be asked if these things are true,
; why il is that We keepJ0Des on our reportorial
sta0i WE answer that it is on account OF
: his legs. Brains and education are good
!, DUAL Gca.ious for newspaper reporter, but
legs arc the main thing. No man who does
not know can imagine the amount OF walk
ing, travelling. aud running ABOUT that re-
porter has to do. A two-iue item often
reprcse hts two.mie walk. The gettIng-up
Of IA column OF news often carries man
from theatre to n church, from the church
to gin-Shop, from the SIN SHOP TO the capt.
|
: the bowel to On Change, from On Change
: TO The slums, from the slums 10 the hotels,
and from the hotels anywhere ard every.
where that accident mry CAL him or bis
{ fancy suggest. He may swap legs over
: twenty miles day. and then take q three
mile tramp, after midnight, looking up the
details Of q suburban braWl.
Now, JcneS is the only man that We kno Il
Of who is absolutely ubiquitous. He has
no wirgS; be uses DO yeIoclpede; be
;. doesn't TIDE On the wigs Of the morn
- Ing; he relies scIes on his legs, Il >hapey
but not conspicuous poir, to carry him
about Ard yet he is everywhere. No
thing can bsppcn but whist he is on hand
taking noes. There wss q fight the other
night on side street-that is, gentleman
knocked another down and ran OIL He waS
followed by swift dark figure fer about a
mile, and at last, finding he couldn't escape,
be TUNED around TO meet bis pursuer. II
,, vas Jones. "Gim me your side Of it. Pre
got tue other fellows story When Bob
:, Smith committed suicide the other day
the writer Of this was in two blocks
of The house in which it ocur.
> red. Wlcu the pistol shot broke upon
) the air he hurried over TO get the details.
feeling sure that be would be the first man
CORPSE vas lying III the middle Of the floor
and mau sitting astride Of Il, with a note
book in one band and the ether hand en-.
gagged in exploring the dead man. pocket
, Need we say that it was Jones. The otber
night MIR. McCurdy stepped quietly out Ct
his boarding house on Forsyth street and
started leisurey down town. Mr. Quigley
Just as quietly stepped out from behind a
wagon aud fred n pistol at Mr.. McCurdy.
klr. McCurdy Sprang al him-he t1'd; Dir.
McCurdy ran after him for fifty yards, and
then Nurned to rctrsce his steps. AS he
turned he met Jones, who, with bis note
; book in hand, and a fine glow Of JOY on his
face, says 'Lem'me have the particulars of
the fuss. I've got all about the shootiDg.'
On Monday news was received at The
Herald office OF n most distressing accident
that had Just happened in the house OF IA cti-
zen ia the east end of he city. A reporter
was instructed to so out at once and get the
particulars. "Can't Jones go:" lie asked.
mo; saw him just an hour ago on his way
TO the Water-W oIkS, three miles of. He
won't be back before dark" The reporter
left and hurried out to the house. He was
asked into the sitting-r9om, and there SIT
Jones at a table taking "noteS Of the Stua-
ton" "Hello," says he; ''Pn just back
from the Water-W orkS, and most broke
down. Can't you take my notes 10 the
officer" These are only a te~ of the ubqui.
touS exploits of Jones. Nothing escapes his
vigilant legs We hereby defy auytblrg,
even of the smallest consequence, 10 happen
where Jones is not
Aud the point which leads us to hold
Jones, despite his falling, is that he is not
6ybtipe man. When the bloudthrstine.S OF
the average editor is considered, it is quite
compliment to Jones TO say that when he is
on the track of an item be will not quit it
even to engage in fight. The other night
q horse.thief was caught in stable. Jones
was on band, of course. Indeed, be was so
much on hand that he was suspected of being
a partner Of the thief, He was at once bus.
tied out, and without wasting any time in
fussiDg about 1t, be ripped off plank at the
side of the stable and hustled back
again, slipping into the grateful OBJ.
scurity of horse-stal, where he
took notes on the affair. So agaip, at
the fire on Tuesday night, when a man pull
ed out handful of bis wbiskers, he pursued
the even tenor Of his way, being ready, 70
doubt, if the gentleman who plucked him
needed any more hair, 10 have surrendered
every wbi.ker be bad, rather than be swerVed
from the path of his duty. When any OF
the reporters of the other papers take occa-
sion to pull his nose he merely gives the in /.
suited organ good strong blow to assure
himself that nothing is broken, and then re.
yeDges himself by beating the other
fellow getting up the news. A man
| knf cked bis beaver bat down over his
face at the election the other day. BY dex-
ferrous movement of his right hand he