The Hawaiian gazette., 1875-06-09
arieGy.

- 90 uncl lager sAlQ BulCunant lhn Ddu
but good deal ish Just right"
NarysyiHe California, allows no boys to b
seen on the street after eight o'clock.
Aaa now they adulterate honey. This is
bsss-iIy fraud.-Ttrre Hqlae Mil
Think OF whisky freezing solid in Montana
Well they always did call it an ice drink on
tsere.-N J. Spectator.
Mrs Holmes, Of Katie King infamy, accord
lur to bs- ovn statement, is sick OF the hoa
bisues."
A Philadelphia broker cOurted young lady for
sz years ana was too bashtal to ask for her hand
ualli ber brother horse-whipped him into it.
An Indiana clergyman sued newspaper for
libe., and dropped dead within q week. The De.
irot Free Press says these fellows will Learn
something by and by.
An editor. down at Haui sburg, says the vii
Iiamsp0rt BaBziA, has got flying machine. The
81" got knocked Of the name in some way, but
he goes right on using it just the same.
A minister without boldness, is ike a smooth
Gle. knife without an edge sentinel that is
afraid TO iet on bis gun. II men will be bold in
SD, ministers must be bold 10 reproye
The worst governments are always the most
ohargeable and cost the people dearest as all men
10 courts OF jadicature pay more for the wrongs
tia, are done them than for the right
By happy contradiction, no system of phi
l5sophy gives such base view Of human nature
as that which is founded on selfloEe. So sure is
sell5Fe 10 degrade whatever it touches.
When VIC see the shameful fortunes amassed
IN Al quarters Of The globe, are we not impelled
TO eEeaim that Judas thirty pieces Of silver have
fructi6ed across the centuries2
Nobody, they say, is hero to his valet. OF
course, for a man must be hero to understand
hero The valet, ! dare say, has great respect for
some Of his own stamp.
When read the several dates on the tomb Of
those that died yesterday and some six hundred
years ago, consider that Great Day when we
shall al OF Us he cotemporaries, and make our
appearance together.-dG,i5Sson.
says a Wisconsin editor: "A young poetess
sends in . contribution entitled, Let US Love-
We viii do our best, but we have been married
over four years now, and are little out of prac-
tice."
For the first time in her political history (and
she's as old as the most of us), China is in the
money market asking loan. She wants So, ,l3s,-
S75. is willing to count CSC. dollar, and give
per cent. per annum as interest. But there are
10 takers.
A Sacramento lawyer remarked to the Court
1T is my candid opinion, Judge, you are an old
fool The Judge allowed bis mildly beaming
eye to faH upon the lawyer brief moment, then,
in voice husky with suppressed emotion, said
1T is my candid opinion that you are fined slOO."
"Dar's de man. Mister Speaker-dar's de man
wot done II. {" shouted a colOred member, rising
suddenly IRON his seat in the Arkansas Legis
lature, with one hand pointing to o white man in
the gallery, and with the other rubbing the sum
NIT OF his cranium. Dat ar cussed white man
les done spit down on de top o my head"
The last experiment in the swinding line is
that Of fellow who claims to be a regular ocu-
lis, and aurist with an Office in Boston, and is
travelling in the suburban towns selling fifty cent
spsotacles COX $50 pair. he warrants them
10 cure deafness and blindness, and says they are
charged with galvanism in such manner as to
render cure speedy and permanent.
An absent-minded Pittsburgh shopman laid
his pocket-bOok, containing considerable sum of
money. on the counter the other day, and forget
ting to whom il belonged, pressed it upon one Of
bis LADY customers, assuring her, in spite Of her
doubts, that il was her property. He did not dis
cover bis mistake til some hours afterward, and
then rectifed il only through the agency of the
mayor
STR up the sleeping lion in the breast of
and be viii hurl at the head Of the |
offender such epithets as nobody but he or an in
furinied Chociaw or Moscovite would ever think
OF using. For instance, Welch paper Of New
York. 7 DTyct, says of Ben Butler: " Ymddang-
sodd Cad Butler" We have thought thou
sand times Of using The very same expression 10
connection with Butler, but somehow or other we
alEays hesitsied to do it--C0urie'- Journal.