The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1875-08-27
NEW NoR.wEsTERs.
A comic song is an absurd-ditty.

A movement is on foot to build a Ma
sonic Temple in Silver City, New.
Red Cloud says that all white men, in
Guiding the Rev. Murray, are liars.
An Iowa hair-brush has done duty fol
thirteen years, and is still brushing away
Only two ex-vice presidents survive
Hannibal Hamlin and Schuyler Col
fax.
The London Athen0una says that Gen
Sherman's book is "full of slangs and vul
garisms."
Apples are so wormy this season that
no one need 60 without mince pie mex
winter.
The Black Hills are spoken of as .
place where men go in miners and come oui
minus.
BY the census just completed, New
York city is shown to have population OF
1864, ,272.
Almost any boy can tell you the differ
ence between wedding garden and guar
dim weed.
The latest fued is between two Alabama
families. The six members have been few
ed down to one.
The watch factory at Elgin, ILL.,, has
begun work on 5000 new watches for the
English market.
How to make the largest census report
with the smallest number Of people is the
study of the age.
Eight hundred dogs is good many
dogs, but the Sultan of Turkey finds himself
owning that many.
Commodore Vanderbilt's heirs think
they see signs of weakness in him, but they
don't see his ducats yet.
-Suet butter is not success. We are
willing to take the word of man who lost
$3S, 900 in its manufacture.
They have discovered new sulphur
mine in Italy, and the itch won't stand any
sort of show there next fall.
The big st. Louis bridge doesn't. pay
expenses, and that's why the toll-takers
scowl at man so fiercely.
-Beecher says that none of his photo-
graphs do him justice. Poor man-the
jury didn't do him justice either.
-Four Arkansas men are getting ready
to 60 over to Cuba and end the war, and The
telegraph wires will have rest.
The stripes run down the trousers legs
once more, and it is pretty hard to tell DR..
Mary Walker from Parson Brownlow.
Cuban money is coming up again. 1t
doesn't take but $27 of it now to hire a
hotel porter to carry trunk up stars.
A South street student asked the mean
ing of tout en- semble. 1t means a brass
band-primarly, an assemblage of toots.
Why is one of the rank and file who
has failed to obtain promotion like an
illicit machine? Because he is private
still!
do you like Goldfish balls, Mr.. Wig
gins T? Mr.. Wiggins hesitatingly-"I really
don't know l don't recollect attending
one."
The American rife team, it appears,
will come home with $150,000 which they
have earned by the perspiration of their
guns.
The man who subscribes literally to
foreign missions and let's his grocery bill
run five months, is the right man to build
up a community.
The Postmaster-General has decided
that letters directed to /" Arkansaw" shall
90 to Arkansas, so don't let that dear old
title go to rust.
Professor Hayden, the geoligist, has
just purchased nearly three thousand head
of cattle, which are now on farm neal
Greeley, Colorado.
-"Mr. D., if you'll get my coat done
by Saturday, shall ever be indebted te
ysu.s' eff that's your game it won't be
DONE" said the tailor.
The London Garden says it can give
no advice to 'sthe gentleman who writes
that the birds have built in the pockets o.
one of his scarecrows'
Hannibal Hamlin carries a sword-cant
with him wherever he goes, but dozer
sword-canes wouldn't defend him agains
the contempt of the people.
If the man who says that fashions were
invented to cover up some imperfectior
does not tell us what imperfeetion low necl
dresses cover up, we shall bust.
Chicago doctors come right out lik'
men and say that cucumbers are healthy
and then sit and watch and wait like vii
)ains for calls from collie patients.
Buffalo Bill has started for Denver t,
visit an editor who called him fraud ant
a blowhard. The editor began buying shot
guns as soon af he received notice.
The Prince af Wales is trying to re
vive the fashion of swallow-tailed coats ant
brass buttons, but the boys follow hin
around and yell: "Shoot that coat!''
Indian rubber horseshoes are comm,
into use, and they make horse pranc
whether he wants to or not. There's n
longer any need of driving tacks into th
harness.
"A benevolent Roman seeing bundl
of papers fall from the mile-a-minute Sun
day Herald train, followed along the tracl
half mile, yelling at the conductor that h
| had lost something.
/ Young ladies who receive the degree o
! A. B, have a decided advantage over th
young gentlemen. We know one ladds th
IndepeadspO who was MA in less than
year from her graduation.
Prof. Wise can't be induced to go up i
balloon again, and he says he doesn't car
two cents whether there's any easterly cur
rent or not. He also wants the newspaper
to let him alone.