The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1875-02-11
LIFE IN THE wHEEL-HoUsE.
A Lightning Pilot of the mississIppI.
BY MARK TWAIN.
A FLOATING PALACE.

FLOATING PALACE.
My chief was presently hired to go on
a big New Orleans boat, and packed
my satchei and went with him. She was
a grand affair. When I stood in her
pilOt-hOuse I was so far above the water
that seemed perched on h mountain !;
and her decks stretched so far away,
fore and aft, below me, that wondered
how ! could ever have considered the
little Paul Jones a large craft. There
were other differences, too. The Paul
Jones' pilOt-house was cheap, dingy,
battered rattle-trap, cramped for room !;
but here was a sumptuOus glass temple :;
room enough to have a dance in snowy
red and gold window curtains an i'm
posing sofa; leather cushiDgs and a
back to the high bench where visiting
pilots sit to spin yarns and " look at the
river " bright fanciful cuspadores -
instead of broad wooden box filed with
sawdust a nice new oil-cloth on the
floor; hOspitable big stove for winter;
wheel as high as my head, costly with
inlaid work wire tiller-rope bright
brass knobs for the bells; and a tidy,
white aproned texas-t tender to bring
up tarts and ices and coffee during the
mid-watch, day and night. Now this
was something like" and so [ began
to take heart once more to believe that
plotting was a romantic sort of Occupa-
tion after all. The moment We were
under way I began to prowl about the
great steamer and fill myself with JOY.
She was as clean and as dainty as a
drawing-rOom when looked down her
long, gilded saloon it was like gazing
through a splendid tunnel she had an
oil-picture, by some gifted sign-painter,
on every state-room door; she glittered
with no end of prism-fringed chande-
liers the clerks Office was elegant, the
bar was marvellous, and the bar-keepers
had been barbered and upholstered at
Incredible cost. The boiler decks q. G.
the second story OF the boat, so to
speak, was as spacious as q church, it
seems to me; SO with the forecastie !;
and there was no pitiful handful of
deck-hands, fremen, and roustabouts
down there. but a whole battalion of
men. The fires we're fiercely gIaring
from a long row of furnaces, and over
them were eight huge boilers. This
was unutterable pomp The mighty
engines-but enough of this. I had
never felt so fine before. And when I
found that the regiment of natty ser
wants respectfully " sir d me, my sat
isfactiCn was complete.
LOOKING AT THE RIVER,
When I returned to the piIot-house
st. Louis was gone and was lost
Here was piece of river which was all
down in my book, but I could make
neither head nor tail of it you under
stand, it was turned around. I had seen
it when coming up stream, but I had
never faced about to see how it looked
when it was behind me. My heart
broke again, for it was plain that had
got to learn this troublesome river both
ways.
The pilot-house was full of pilots,
going down to "lOok at the river. "
What is called the upper river" (the
two hundred miles between st. Louis
and Cairo, where the Ohio comes i'm
was low; and the Mississippi changes
| it's channel so constantly that the pilots
used to always find it necessary to run
| down to Cairo to take a fresh Look,
when their boats were to lie in port a
] week, that is, when the water was at a
low stage. A deal of this Choking at
| the river" was done by poor fellows who
| seldom had a berth, and whose only
| hope of getting one lay in their being
freshly posted, and, therefore, ready to
drop into the shoes of some reputable
pilot, for a single trip, on account of
such pilots sudden illness, or some
other necessity. And q good many OF
them constantly ran up and down in
specting the river, not because they
ever really hoped to get a birth, but
because (they being guests of the boat
it WIS cheaper to ''look at the river
than to stay ashore and pay board. In
time these fellows grew dainty in their
tastes, and only infested boats that had
an established reputation for setting
good tables. All visiting pilots were
useful, for they were always ready and
willing, winter or summer, night OF
day, to go out in the yawl and help
buoy the channel or assist the boats
pilots in any way they could. They
were likewise welcome, because al
pilots are tireless takers, when gath
cred together, and as they talk only
about the river they are always under
stood and always interesting. You
true pilot cares nothing about anything
on earth but the river, and his pride IL
his occupation eurpasses the pride o
kings
We had a fine company of these rive,
inspectors along this trip. There wer'
eight or ten; and there was abundance
Of room for them in our great pilot
house. Two or three of them wor
polished silk hats, elaborate shirt
fronts, diamond breast-pins, kid glove
and patent-leather boots. They wer
choice in their English, and bore them
; selves with g dignity proper to men o
solid means ana prodigious reputation
as pilots. The others were more o
less loosely clad, and wore upon thei
= heads tall felt cones that were suggest
? i've of the days of the commonwealth.
! TERRIFYING NIoETIEs.
I was a cipher in this august con
: | pany, snd felt subdued, not to say tol
pid. I was not even of sufficient cons,
quence to assist at the wheel when
vas necessary to put the tiller har
down in hurry the guest that stoO
nearest did that when occasion require
and this was pretty much all the time
: | because of the erOokedness of the chal
4 mel and the scant water. stood in
j corner; and the talk listened to too
9 the hope all out of me. One visitC
said to another:
"Jim, how did you run Plum poin
e coming up ?"
''It was in the night, there, and "a
d it the way one of the boys on the DiaI
+ told me started out about fifty yarl
above the woOd-pile on the false pOin
and held on the cabin under Plum poil
till raised the reef quarter less twaiT
], then Strengthened up for the middle b
: till I got we'll abreast the old on
, limbed cottonwood in the bend, the
d got my stern on the cottonwood al
IS head on the low place above the POin
Is and came through a-booming-nine al
b a half"
= " Pretty square crossing, amt it ?"
D ''Yes, but the upper bars EOrkiI
d down fast
p Another pilot spoke up and said /:
a "I had better water than that, 81
IF ran It lower down started out from &
s, false point-mark twain-rsised &
Is second reef abreast the big snag IN Il
b. bend, and had quarter less twain"
lie One Of the gorgeous ones remarks
e. g / don't want to find fault with 20
re leadsmen, but that's a good deal
e. water for Plum Point, It seems 70 me
se There Was an approving nod
] II a T.. =