davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ohio Waisenfreund. [volume] (Pomeroy, O. [Ohio]) 1874-1953, 1875-09-22

WA ""''9 WV pultVuH HlltV YtIllt XII
wunocrliA @erbdnsnib 9eilnacpl9t, uno
uon G6ren unb @ut mid treibt. 9entc
Der &coen, bic mir gcltern fritz mod nit
einonScr 9tpflo9en, ols i0 eu0, mcinen
&dtDen, einen 9efeDl 9ob, ocn ib crfiiQt
le9rn lpollte, uno Den lift mir ausrcoetet
ols cine5 &Dni9s nidt wiirbig. llno
lol0er 9cimli6fciten lo9te 0cr&Dnig Dem
S0enfen nod mr6r, Der o6er 6e9onn Sn
laDeu uno lproh: 9e gSabrbeit la01
ou, ia, o6cr Dir mub lie Der Seufel ins
DIR geblolen bobcn. 1nO Der &0ni9
IIpra@ g9omit id audi oas un9lid per-
oient cos midi ldld9t> mein 9er5 lo9t
mir. oob i9 ein wo9r9after &0ni9 bin
Ser @0ent lieb i6n reoeu, 9e0a6te
obcr oo6, ben ieltenen Toll oem&0ni9 ols
9}euisfeit iu binterbringen. @o ma6te ct
1id benin alsbalo ouf un0 trot por ben
Gngel unO crjd1lte ibm Die Mdr bon 1ci=
ncm >uunocrliben Ga It. Ser gngel 9ebDt
ibm> btu&6ni9 5u 9ofe 5u fiibren, uno es
lommclte liD in cinem 9robcn, ,@aale Der
9onje @ofitoat uno oas @clinoe erfiillte
aae Sreppen uno @oleren. 98ie nun
Scr @6ent Ben geoemiitbiotcn &0nig
6radte, ldtie 9Qes ip0ttil @riib @ott,
$ocrr &0nig o1ne 2ano !!
Ser Gngel lob in rciber Yra0t neben
Der &0ni9in auf bem5 brone, unb iprab
5agt an, It oas luabr, leib ibr 9icr &0=
mig? uno Der &0nig ontluortetc @oDl
lab i'd Sen Sag. oa i6 hicr 9e>ooltig mar,
no MQe, Die li6 jett Dor oir nei9en> na0
Dem 2ddeln mciner @un1t ba11ten, uno
100 Die Ss0ni9in meme @emablin> MIDI
als ibren &0nig uno SDerrn ertonnte. =.
nod beute ibie0 iic bpl0 uno freunolib
pon mir
9ie &0ni9in woro ob Der Eeoc oes
fremoen Olannes rot6 nor G1onl, uno
Elm alter @ofritter rief @6weiee, S6je=
wi9t! unb Die jnoen 2cder am 6ofe
MOLTEN l@on l6@unt MAIDEN uno ibren
9elocnmutb le6en lallen unb 9riifsn na d
oem Sf0nig, bdtten ibm au1 libel .9enae
mit9elpielt, bod Der Gngel lpeDrte lie ob
uno fii6rtc oen &0ni9 nit iA bin,pe9 in
Elm einiamcs @cmod).. Sort ipro6 er 81
ibm: Sag al, 9lau6lt bu nibt, bo( @ott
Gcmolt 9ot il5cr alle @cl ld0pTe @ie6e,
>pie lcine ollnldNti9e &roi # hiD in oen
Staub tritt. g9os bilit Dir oein mQbti.
9es &rie9sbeer 98er 9ebor6t ocinem
&ufe uno Gebote? 9io6 lebet Die 98o6r=
belt: Wirit Die @enalti9en pon i6rem
Sbron uno erb61et 10 bo nieori9 lino
uno on nno oeines9!ei9en peroet oiels
gSoDrbeit eWig niNt unteroriiden.
@o lpra0 Der GAgel sum &0ni9, uno
oieler frogte erbebcno M(ann, mer lcio
Sbr? @cio SIR @ott ocr 9GmaOti9e,
BON Dem Sbr reoet 10 erbarme 1ih Cure
@nooe iber MIDI armen betb6rten damn.
Sd bin ni1t @ott, lpra0 oorouf Der
Gngcl> aber lciner goten elmer bin id
uno oes luabren G9ril ltus Diener. Scr
lanote mid uno Dir 1anote er Die @troie
oeincr 9ofoDrt. @ott erD19et uno ernie
bert luen ct milf; luarum periololt ou
oiele MobrDeit?
9a iiel Der R0nis lin su oes @ngc1s
TiiBen uns Bat Inn @ottes Sulo uno
gerSel9 jung. Ser @n9el DieB i'm ouHte.
zen uno lpra6: 0u mubt @louben Da=
ben an 0as Nort@ottes 9u mubt borm=
ber5i9 lein 9escn Sic, 10 Dit ibren Sum-
mcr tloQen. 0u mubt 9ered)t 1ein 9e9en
ron (Ipinpn nie npnou Aon G&ro;,n,, !
Ohio Waisenfreund. [volume] (Pomeroy, O. [Ohio]) 1874-1953, 1875-09-22
Sbio @aiienfrcuuo.
Orr &0uia int 8aoe.
Gin MiGyd)ci,.

uicle 2anoc untcrtbun worcn, bab lei
Socrs ldier iibermiitbi9 nno er bcs @lou
hcns marc, cs; 9d6c feincn MGDti9trt
ouf Der gSelt als i'm. 9a 9cl6ab IS Ell
neg So9es, bob i'm oie Suit anfan, elm
ma! in Die &irGe al 9e1en, ga b1rte G
Den Yricfer Die. g8orte ber oGerleii9ltel
sSum9frau Nfdria ipre6cn, lpie 1ie ir
Guon9eliiten 9utas ite6en Gr wirif 81
@suoltl9en pon ibrem 56rone uno er
b6bet 10 oa uieori9 fins. Oa crl9ro
Der &DniA uno woro Sornie un6 befobl
oab Die 98orte, Die Ct pernommen, ipr:
tan ni1t mebr 9elelen lueroen iollten
Niemono ioue ie mebr bDren unb fl
lollten ons9etil9t iperoen aus Der Bi6eI
g4ie Ser &6ni9 befo6len> 10 gelAab's, oi
9Sorte lpuroen aus9etil9t aus Der 0eili=
gen Gdrift un0 in Dem 2anoe bon Nie'
monoem me1r 9cleien.
9arauf nun 9elhaD cs> oab oer&6ni6
in Elm 8oo gn9. 9a lanote @ott einen
Gn9el, auf boB Der &Dni9 biiBe fir ben
Trcpel, 10 er bt9angen ON beili9en Mort.
,no ser Gn9el nobm oes &0nio @eltolt
an unb i6lu9 Sic glu9en Der Mnoern nit
8linobeit, allo, oob 9lQe i'm fiir Den So
Mig 6ielten, Sen aber, Der Ser &0ni9 mar,
nidt mebr ga fir ertanntcn. Nls Der nun
ous bem Dab trat, iette er ,li6 aui cine
Banf, oif Der ocr Gn9el idon 1oB, unb
ocs6olb bieb i6n Der. 8aber .ou ffcben
uno lih onbersluo leben. 8ilt ou trunfen,
8aoer? fro9tc Der &6nie, ooB bu alIo
nit mir rcoeit SD bins, Scr&oni9, oein
@c6ieter.
Gin 9iorr mas1t bu iein, onttportete
brr 8ooer. Mcin 9err, Der 5Dnie. 1ibl
ia bier; menen &6nig bil aber ou ? llno
no 1T has Geid beiner MaieTat ? Mob1
9forragona ?
Y6lcwibt l'brie oer30nis polkr 3orn,
nobm eincn &iibcl uno lparf ben an ocs
8aoers &opf. 9o b0rte oos Goose1inbe
oen 2drm, elite 6ersu uno Ial6te bcn S.
mig nit Tauit6l> biz Der @u9el als G0nio
ooswilden trat uno i'm ious Den Sduoen
bcs elinoes bcfreite. 0onn ober perlie{
CT i'm uno trot ous Der 8oolube uuo %
le9ten i1m oes Seoni9s 9iener, ser Sen
Gn9el fir i1ren 9errn Diclten, Die f0j jt(ie
den @eludnoer an un0 geleitctcn i'm ouf
it4sen :@oien nab Der Sof6urg. Sen
&6ni9 aber mar fen Ser 8aoer uno feline
GeleQsn cntbl0bt auf Die @trobc uno bo
itono ef nun 0rouben por Ser S6iir unt
wubte nid)t,: ,uie linn 9e51cben mar. Uni
bos8olf 1ammelte 1ih I'm i'm unb 1pottet'
iber i'm, oa5u 1cin eigenes @eln0e, oenu
cs fannie i'm &einer mebr. l1no ct elite
wie ct NOR nit grober @6om pon Sen
2euten bin,ue9, bic linn aber no6liefen
wie einem Sbdren, 5u Dem Souic leines
Sdenfen uno pieltreucn &atbes.
Gs mar na6 oer3eit oesMitta9seIlen
nno Ser @6ent pFe9te 9erooe Nlitta9s
roIt> ols Der &0nig am Shore 16eQtt
uno Ginlab be9ebrte. Ser YfDrtner fro9=
te, ,uer CT Ici uno mas es gdbe? Sene,
la9te: Sd bins oer &0nig.
81 piui ! oo6 rief Der Pf6rtner , il
i6anobor bab' ih nod teinen &0nig &C.
leben. Du tolnmit mitniGten berein. 9o
1@rie uno ldrmtc Der &0nig eigentDiim
id, oaB es Der GAenf D0rte uno fra9tc
mas es 9a6e. Scr Yf0rtner laete: Serr,
es itebet elm N}ann orouBen, Ser lit folt
blob, nno la9t, er lei 6cin Serr uno &0'
mig, uno oos 9olt lit bintcr i'm uno boi
1einen MHen on Dem 9}arrn.
Ohio Waisenfreund. [volume] (Pomeroy, O. [Ohio]) 1874-1953, 1875-09-22
Gin 6eorer &alenoer
fir 1916.

Ger stiid 90 Gents; pct 9ub. $50; porto
.' rel $500.
Ser Ginic6lcr &alenocr fat ncbit sobfrei~
d)en Sllultrationcn unb suei intcrciantcn Gou-
traitbilocrn:
2SeftfiGe 2'ereime 1t. &eiffi6e 9,ereime
bicics SoDr nod ciuen bel lsnSercn Sd)mud er<
balten ourd siuci id)onc Gitclblocr ouf Sou
papicr, barltellcnb:
Gas o6ttli1e 9cr5 Jciu, une
DaS hciliec @cr5 Wiaria,
NIT bunbcrt %r0micn in Scrt1c bon.
3m0li bnnocrt ii. fiinf;ig 9ollars.
. Scr Sllmitrirte
Sinct,,untter binfembe 8pte
NIT id0ncn 9olsld)nittcn.
$res per Stiid Gents; per 9ubeno 80 GrntS;
per 9nbeno portofre 40 Gents.
BENzIGER BROTHERS,
L. 8. 1856, CINCINNATI, 0.
LIB. 484s, NEW YORK.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
Old Aunt Alice.
From the Brooklyn Argus.

rloih Tue DrooAiyH Argus
eyes, honey, Use hobbled out into
de sunshine"
The slanting rays of an October
sun warmed the blood of old "Aunt
Alice" on Sunday afternoon, as she
sat on a bench in the pauper's yard
at Flatbush.
"It's a beautiful day, Aunty."
81 is libbin eighty-seben year, chile,
an | bress de Lord | see dis day"
The old negro woman rose slowly
from the wooden bench, and pointing
with her cane, said:
81 look at dat ober yonder, and
tank de Master dat de bref is in dis
body"
Aunt Alice pointed, not to natures
panorama Of green sward and leaves
of scarlet and gold, but to the smok-
ing ruins and blackened walls where
the fire had ragged the night before.
81 suppose the old ladies were very
much frightened while the fire
lasted?"
eyes, honey, dat's de truf. Up in
one OBJ Dc rooms oh dat ole shell dar
was twenty-six oh us, all ole cul.ud
ladies. When we hear dat 'larm fire
you'd think de Angel Gabriel blow
de horn. Dar was cryin' and dar was
singin', an de hotter de fire git de
more camp meetin' noise desc ole
wenches make"
'But where were the bables?" ask
ed the reporter.
"Ober in de next bulldin'. Dose
babies keep still as kittens, but de
nusses holler like de day oh judg-
ment. One OBJ do wimmen ran out
into de street an climb tree wild
a chile in her arms"
"Didn't you leave the building
when the fire broke out?"
"'Deed, honey, we didn't. Dose
twenty-six old cullud ladies jes drop
flat on de flo an gin to shout. We
all spec to git burned up, an de pow
er of navigatin' was clar gone. I
spec we'd been dar yet ct dey didn't
lug us off,"
"Were you all carried out?"
"Yes, chile, we was all toted off,
Dar was mighty nice-lookin' young
gemmen got his arms round me an
lug me down stairs. I kind O. ik"
dat, for ye see, honey, it was the fust
time dis chile eber got square hug
GIN from white man."
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
A Touch of Nature in Court.

An old woman. whose face was
full Of Times revengeful lines-whose
hair was as white as snow
whose sight was hardly strong
enough to enable her to see the desk
before which she trembling stood.
And his Honor said:
"God help such as you when
second-childhood robs them of
strength and mind! Poor old woman
you may go!" She hesitated, and
seemed to feel that some explanation
was necessary, she replied:
cit was either drink or drown my
self! My troubles are too much for
my heart!"
He pointed at the door and softly
said:
"My heart aches to see one so
aged and weak and tender, brought
here. If you have a home, go toit,
and l will talk to you after court
Closes" s.,.
She walked feebly out, tears in her
eyes, and when "Jim Fig" the news
boy, offered her a. score of pennies,
hoping to Tighten her burden, she
shook her head and said:
"It's my old heart that aches, and
money can't ease 1t, Lord bless You,
boy!"
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
To be Handled with Care.
Denver News.


AS a freight train, bound west,
left Bryan on the Union Pacific, a
few days ago, the engineer heard a
singular creaking sound, and think
ing there might be something wrong
with his locomotive, stopped the
train and examined his engine, which
was found in good trim. An ex-
animation of the train was next made
and In the center was found a car
containing some kind of fluid, which
was leaking through upon the track
in drops. The car was opened, and
inside were discovered a number of
huge tanks labeled glycerine. The
car was side-tracked at Granger. In
moving it wheel passed over a
drop OF the substance, when it explod-
ed with report like that of a pistol.
The car was consigned to some firm
in San Francisco, but the company
have as yet been unable to find who
shipped it. 1t is supposed to be nitro
glycerine. The railroad men have
tested it by placing a drop of it on the
track and striking it with hammer
which will cause loud report. A
few shavings that had been lying in
the car became saturated with it, and
were laid on the ground and struck
with stone, which caused them to
fly in every direction. A track has
been built away from the main
track, and the car run out upon it,
where it now remains, every one
fearing to 90 near it. What to do
with it puzzles everyone. There
must be from 1000 to 1900 gallons
in it.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
An Old Tlint-Lock Rifle.
Richmond (ya.) Whig.


An elderly man named Beckwith,
residing in one, of the peninsula
counties came to this city last Thurs
day on business. He brought with
him an old-fashioned flintlock rife
to have stock and lock. put on.
On the cars he fell in conversation
with three gentleman from the city,
when one Of them, to test the reality
of some of the extraordinary feats Of
craftsmanship he boasted of, offered
him ten dollars to repeat some of
them, to which the other two offered
five dollars between them. The trial
came off in an old field half a mile
below Rockets, and was witnessed
by about dozen persons.
The old fint-lock was fired seven
times and only once missed its aim.
The old gentleman after making two
shots at small objects to one side, to
get his hand steady, as he said, hand
ed his son a potato and stationed
him at fifty yards distance, holding
the potato between the thumb and
forefnger The rifle cracked, and
the potato fell cloven in three or
four pieces. One of the larger pieces
was thrown into the air, the marks
man keeping at the same distance,
and again the shot told. An inch
and a ha.f auger was then produced
and a hole bored in the fence, behind
which was fastned piece of white
paper. At the distance of sixty
yards the marksman sent q ball
clear through the aperture, piercing
the paper. At the fourth shot, from
sixty yards distance, the bowl of a
pipe was crushed. AT the fifth shot
copper cent was thrown into the
air and hit. The sixth and seventh
shots were delivered at a blackened
tive-cent nickle piece thrown up by
the son, standing about thirty yards
off. At the first attempt the shot
missed. The old gentleman showed
considerable modification and laid
the blame upon bystander who, at
the critical moment, sneezed loudly.
The next attempt, however, was an
entire success. The old man declin-
ed any further trials of his skill, and
when offered a sum of. money to re-
peat his first feat of shooting potato
from his sons hand he refused saying
he didn't care to try such expert
ments unless his weapon was fresh
ly cleaned. The exhibition was the
more remarkable from the fact that
the marksman was an old man, at
least fifty. His eye however, is a
clear bright gray. His appearance is
that of a poor farmer. The young
man showed not the least tremor or
anxiety during the dangerous expert
ment upon himself. The old man
referring to his son, said: "Bob can
shoot just as well as | can"
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
Where to Advertise.


The propensity to seek irregular
mediums for advertising is one OF the
queer things in this business. The
prices that some business men will
pay for sticking their advertisements
in an irregular place, where no one
looks for business advertisements, is
unaccountable, especially when COM
pared with their unwillingness to
pay anything for advertising IN the
regular channels. They will pay
large sums for inserting their busi-
ness cards in a section of a frame in
a hotel, bar-room, street-car, railway
station, or in a hotel register, OF an
almanac, or a guide-book, or annual
of one sort OF another, or in theatre
programme, or in special adyertis
ing sheet, issued when it can get
enough to pay.
The by-ways they seek, or that
successfully solicit them, are innum-
erable. Likewise they spend large
sums in printing special circulars,
and in postage to send them. In all
this they ignore the most essential
condition in advertising, namely, that
it has character and effect from the
mediums through which it is given
to the reader. Advertisements thrust
into irregular and unbusiness places
impress the general mind that the
concern is of similar character. On
the other hand, an advertisement in
a general newspaper of first-rate
standing, carries the impression that
the advertiser has a standing in his
own community, which he is not
afraid to show his neighbors, and
that he does not shrink from compe
tition with the best of them.
These are the different impressions
that are made on all minds by adver-
tisements in a journal of high char
acter and general circulation among
the reputable classes, and the same
when seen in byplaces, and irregular
OF low channels. Every one finds
this in his own feelings, if he will
but think on the subject. If any one
is going to place to buy, whether
he be a trader or buying for use, and
has to seek the dealers through adver-
tisepents, where will he look for
thenH To registers, almanacs, thea
tire bills, frames in railway stations,
OCCASIONAL advertising sheets, OF cir
culars? On the contrary, he looks
to the most reputable newspapers of
the place, and he thinks that adver-
tisements in these give an assurance
of the good standing of the advertis-
er, and of his business enterprise,
and the sufficiency of his stock.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
Capital Joke.

The following story is told as a
remarkable instance of the apprecia-
ton of humor.a A German soldier
was ordered fifty lashes for some al
legged act of insubordination. Fritz,
disciplined to silence, was fixed to
triangles in the presence of his COM
pany. When the first lashes fell up
on his naked shoulders the worthy
fellow, instead of displaying eviden-
ces of distress, burst into fit of un-
controllable laughter. The execu-
toner, regarding this manifestation
as by no means complimentary to
his skill, laid on with redoubled ar
dor. But the more he laid on, the
more Fritz laughed. When cut
down, he still found great difficulty
in restraining his mirth, and indulg-
ed in loud intermittent outlaws. The
officer in command of the company,
with curiosity naturally excited, ap-
preaching the bleeding wretch, and
inquired the cause of his mirth.
"Why, !" replied Fritz, breaking into
a fresh fit Of laughter. "l'm the
wrong man."
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05

Nitro-glycerine is formed by the
action of nitric acid upon glycerlne
at a low temperature. The process
consists essentially in the slow mix
ture of glycerine with the acid, every
thing being packed in ice through
out the operation, and then in wash
ing the nitro-glycerine from the ex-
cess of acid with water. During the
process, irritating fumes are given off
in large quantities. (The workbench
resemble skeletons, they are SO un-
healthy.) When it is at last washed
and ready for use, nitro-glycerine is
au oily liquid having specific grav-
ity of l.6. Freshly made it is creamy
white and opaque. After prolonged
contact with the atmosphere it clears
and becomes of transparent amber
color. 1t has a sweet aromatic
taste, and produces a violent head
ache if placed upon the tongue or
even allowed to touch the skin,
though workmen or miners who are
constantly using it soon get rid Of
this. AT 80 deg. to 40. deg Fahren-
heit it freezes to a white crystalline
mass. When frozen IT cannot be
fired; and it is only safe during trans
portation when frozen.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
Some time since a Proyidence (R

Some time since Providence Or.
!. policeman saw a turtle dig hole
and deposit her eggs therein, at
Roger Williams Park, and when he
went to his home at night disinterred
the eggs thirty-fve in number, and
took them with him. Digging a
hole in his yard similar to the one
made by the turtle, and as near to it
in shape and size at possible, he
again buried the eggs, and after ll2
days they commenced to hatch out,
and in short time thirty-four little
turtles no larger than an old fashion
copper cent came to the surface, only
one of the eggs failed to hatch.-
They were put in pond.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05

A gentleman in London has sued a
neighbor for keeping bantam cock
that crowed in the morn at four o'clock
so habitually and vigorously that the
recovery of his wife, who was in del
icate health, was retarded by the
noise. The defendant submitted
that he was strictly within his legal
rights In keeping fowls, and that he
could not prevent the plumed biped
from chanting his sweet song. The
Judge suggested to the defendant
the propriety ofabating the nuisance.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05
The Frog Trade.
Correspondence of the Troy Press.

Correspondence of the Troy Press.
was out driving on Saturday, and
few miles from here found two men
in a swamp by the side of the road,
who seemed to be crazy, to judge
from their movements. 1 watched
them from the carriage some time.
and finally made up my mind they
were fishing, but how they could
find water enough to fish in l could
not imagine. Finally l called out to
them, "what are you doing there?"
"Come and see," one of them shouted
back. Ihitched my horse and picked
my way over the bogs to them. They
were catching frogs. They would
strike them with clubs where they
could reach them, but the most of
them they caught with wire ''snare."
They had large basketful-more
than hundred pounds, they said
and l guess they told the truth. One
of them said he made a good deal of
money catching frogs for the New
York market. He SAID that In one
month last season he caught 1900
pounds of dressed frogs, for which
he got thirty cents pound, making
$3.50 for his months work. Part of
the time he had two boys to help
him. Last week, near Hudson, he
said he caught upwards of 500 pounds
and sold them for $3.50, or at an aver
age of thirty-two cents pound
These stories seemed to me incredi-
BILE, and yet he assured me it was
truth. He can clear twenty-eight
cents pound, he says, easily. He
seemed to be an honest man, and,
from the ease with which they caught
the frogs, | was led to believe that
he had not stretched the truth much,
If at all.
Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1875-11-05

Mr.. Warner, a respectable and law
abiding citizen of Baker street, rode
home in an expresa wagon the other
day, having "a hand fire extinguisher
and the driver for company.
"What's that thing?p asked his
wife, in contemptuous tones as she
opened the hall door
'What's that? Why, that's fire
extinguisher-best. thing you ever
say-meant to have got one year
ago."
'Jacob, you are always making
fool of YOURSELF" she continued, as
she shut the door. "Every patent
right man gets around you as cat
lays for mouse"
"Does, eh? Ifyou knew anything
at all, you'd know that every store
and Office in Detroit has one O these.
They've saved lots of buildings and
may save ours" sr
"You throw it at the fire, don't
you?" she inquired in very sarcastic
tones.
He carried it up stairs into closet
without replying, and she followed
on and asked:
"Does it shoot a fire out?"
eff you don't know anything, I'll
learn you something! 1t is full Of
chemicals; you strike Oh this knob on
top and she's all ready to open this
faucet and play OH the fire."
She grinned as she walked around
! it, and finally asked:
s'Do you get horse to draw it
around?"
"No, 6n't get horse to draw it
around. You see these straps? We'll,
| back up, put my arms through them
and here it is on my back"
81 see it is" she sneered.
Sand can't run to any part Of the
house with it?'' he demanded. "See!
see"
And he cantered along the hall, in
to the bedrooms and out, and was
turning the head of the stairs when
his foot caught in the carpet. He
threw up his arms and she grabbed
at him, and both rolled down stairs.
He yelled and she yelled. Sometimes
he was ahead and then she took the
lead, and neither OF them had passed
under the "strng" when the extin-
guisher, humping apd humping, be-
gan to shoot off its g. of chemi-
Gals.
"You old -!" she started to say,
when stream from the hose struck
her between the eyes, and she didn't
| finish.
"What in-o-u-c-h.!" roared Mr..
Warner, as he got a big dose in the
ear.
They brought up in heap at the
bottom of the stairs, the stream play
ing into the parlor, against the hall
door, and up stairs by turns, and she
gasped:
"I'll have you sent to 4 fools asy-
lum!"
"Who's fool?" he roared, dancing
around, with his eyes full of chemi-
calls.
'I'm going to faint" she squeaked.
"And Tve broken my back!' he
shouted.
1t was sad house when those two
highly respectable old people got SO
that they could use their eyes and
discuss matters calmly. And she
doubled up her fist and hoarsely said:
''Take that Investigator, or distin-
guisher, or whatever you call it, back
down town, and tell everybody that
you are lunaticn'
And he said:
''Blame it! l know more than all
your family put together"