The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1875-10-22

TIC 1StteTSs
The young man alung the Ma faster
! than tramp printer in Z country news
paper shop, and YEARLY said j: =a$1 n .x.s1
mo SIR 1.s ,ss.S -. j. ~.
s''Then, who in thunder is all them thar
letters and pigeon-holes fur, anyhow, by
gum = ripped out the indignant old
man; and before the young man had
time to reply, the old granger was shut.
fling down the street, swearing that "this,
there pestofas is a blamed mernoperly
ike everything else these days!'
THE EARL OF DUDLEY. i
When Mr.. Ward, became Viscount
Dudley and Ward, had taken possession
Of the family estates, he suffered as much
embarrassment as his father from an
! overgrown- fortune. He ono day dc.
scribed this embarrassment to my Uncle
Archy in very graphic terms. "When ]
came to my estate he said, II resolved
to spend my whole income within the
year. With that viewI purchased the
estate Of Eastman, in Scotland; bought
a library at Venice repaired my house
IN Park Lane, ETC., etc, etc; but rise
unexpectedly took place in the price of
iron, which brought me 100000, and you
know one can't always be prepared for
such contingencies.
When Lord Palmerstor in his auto
biography mentions as a notable instance
Of disinterested love of power that his
friend Dudley would have gladly given
fG,OOO year to remain in office, he evil
IDENTIFY was not aware that to Dudley
f6,OOO year was a mere trhe.
One Of Lord Dudley's eccentric habits
was that of speaking to himself or think
ing aloud. Of this practice many anus
ing instances were related, perhaps occa-
sionally invented, by his friends. Soon
after he had succeeded to the title of
Dudley and Ward, lady asked Lord
Castlereagh how he accounted for the
custom. ut is only Dudley speaking to
Ward" was the ready answer to her
inquiry.
Lord Dudley was introduced at an
evening party to Lady n, whom he was
requested to hand down to supper. Her
ladyship availed herself Of the oppor.
tunity to present her two daughters,
after which ceremony she overheard him
as they went down stairs, muttering to
himself in his usual undertone: 'sThe
fair one is PLAIN; the dark one is not
amiss; but the fair one is exceedingly
plain II am glad, my Lord,'' says
Lady n, with good-humored READINGS,
shat ut all events the dark one pleases
you"
A gentleman from Staffordshire pre-.
vailed on Lord Dudley to present him at
court. They got on very we'll as far as
St. James street, where they were stop
ped nearly half an hour by the line of
carriages. His Lordship then forgot
himself, and, after long pause, began:
Nov this tiresomc country Squire will
be expecting me to ask him to dinner.
Shall ask him, or shall I not? No; l
think he would be bore'' The individ-
ual so Unexpectedly blackballed was at
first COMPOUNDED, but, recollecting his
companions infirmity, commenced in
turn an audible soliloquy: "Now, this
tiresome old Peer will Of course be ask
ing me 70 dine with him to. day. Shall I
60, or shall l not go? No, I think it
would be a bore.' This impromptu was
we'll taken, and the invitation was given
in earnest and accepted.
| After sitting long time With lady to
whom he was paying a morning visit,
Lord Dudley exclaimed aloud: II won
der when this tiresome woman will 70
away"
At dinner given by Lord Wilton,
who had one IF the best cooks in Lon
don, Lord Dudley tasted Of some dish of
which he did not approve, and, forgetting
where he was, began apologizing to the
company for the badness of the entertain
ment. 1.-THE fact u.s." said he, ''that nv
head cook was taken i'll, and some kitchen
girl, l suppose, has been employed to
dress the dinner
Lord Dudley, receiving visit from the
poet Rogers at Paris, proposed that they
should 60 together to the Catacombs. It
has often been remarked Of Rogers that
with his fine bald head, wrinkled skin,
and sunk checks, he was more like
deaths head than any man that was ever
seen alive. Accordingly, when the poet
had spent an hour or two in the abodes
Of mortality, and was about to make his
exit, the keeper. startled at his death.like
appearance, tried to stop him, crying out,
''Halloo! Get you back! You have no
right to come out!' Rogers afterward
complained to Lord Dudley that he had
cruelty deserted him in this emergency.
1''My dear Rogers" replied the Earl, II
did not like to interfere, you looked so
much at home."-Old Times and Dis
t0nt Places, John Sinclair.
HADN'T READ HIS COUNTRY'S HIS
TORY.
(Cincinnati Times.]
story came to us from Cleveland
which will be relished hereabouts, where
the family name Of the hero is not un.
known. In the action Of Luady's Lane,
a Colonel O'Ncil ("General'' he came to
call himscl) got scratch on his leg.
The wound was matter of great glory to
him, and he nursed it throug h after days,
growing lamer with every year that the
memory Of his bravery might be ever
near him. Gradually, from sheer pom.
dering over his glories, he grew to think
that the success Of the battle was largely
owing to his valuable services, and finally,
tie impression grew and became fixed in
his brain that Scott was mere subordi-
nate to himself: One day, late in life, as
he sat nursing his leg and bordering over
the glorious past, young man, visiting
the family for the first time, approached
and sympathctically remarked:
''Lamc, General g
eyes, SIR" after pause and with i'm.
pressive solemnity, 81 am lame.''
Been riding, sir g
No. with rebuking firmness. II
have not been riding.''
"Ah! slip on the ice, General, and hurt
your leg -