The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-10
A Story With a Moral.

A Story With a Moral.
The. time of the year has arrived
when the winning voice of the ven
dor of villainons. vermin extermina-
ting compounds may be heard in back
yards and summer Kitchens, soothing
the exasperated feelings of your wife
with the comforting assurance that
her g%oosebcrry vines and cucumber
bushes, and other pot plants need be
left no longer to the merciless ravages
of the phosphorescent lightning-bug
or the beguiling embraces of the mea-
surfing worm. That the pestiferons
insects. need no longer be permitted
to revel with impunity among the
odoriferous sun-flower beds; or cause
the creeping castor bean and the ma
jestic ivy to wilt under the blighting
influences of the midnight moon, by
cutting the veins and arteries through
which they derive their sustenance
from mother earth. That her morn
ing snooze need no longer be interrupt
cd by the early meanderings, in search
of his maternal meal-ofthat internal,
carnivorous, nocturnal perambulator,
and haunter of corded bedsteads and
papered walls-that - but why
elaborate?
n few days since, u city was Wis
tied by one of these p~eripatetio, bug
killing, commissioning fiends,
whose auburn complexion, ford hair
and lantern jaws, indicated but too
plainly a"mind diseased" with a burn
ing desire to accumulate unbounded
wealth,-by turning an honest nickel
inc a shinplaster of a larger -denomi-
nation. He carried a car~pet-satchel
of an ancient pattern, and wore boots
with summer pants. He entered the
house of a worthy citizen on Somers
street at the front door: his customa-
nv back door entrance being varied
on this occasion, out OF respect for the
feelings of a large .sorrel six year old
bull pup that slept ~serencly acros the
side entrance way. The good woman
of the house received him blandly at
the parlor door, listened with atten-
ton to his lengthy and pathetic en-
coniums upon his "Patent, perfnmed,
pulverized, concentrated, swift but
silent death and destruction TO all
maliciously disposed insects and
worms" and then she spoke and act
ed in a m3nner worthy to be circufat-
ed by all. She said, ell try some of
that stuff" and majestically passed
through the half-epened door. An
angelic smile played upon and lit up
the features of the proprietor of the
"patent, %perfumed, pulverized, con-
centrated, swift but silent death, &c."
as he unlocked his carpet-satchel and
took therefrom a paper o fhis "patent,
perfumed, pulverized, concentrated,
swift but silent death, &C." and held ii
in his dainty south paw awaiting the
return of his hostess, who had, as he
supposed, gone. hunting the tradition
al stocking from which to extract the
twenty-five cents with which to pay
for the priceless boon. There he stood
rs his anticipated customer returned
with something in her extended hand.
which he stretched out his unoccupied
paw to meet, while visions of n glori,
Gus lunch of red herring and sand.
witches, with a hard boiled egg and 9
glass of lager to finish off with, all tc
be purchased with the quarter, now
within his reach, fioated through hi;
mind. His open hand halted directly
beneath. her closed digits-a moment
of suspense-the muscles of her fin,
gers relaxed, then opened, and int
his open palm fell-cne circulio, ono
measuring worm, two potato bugs
Colorado and three long green GU
cumber worms in the prime of life
"There," said she, "let's see what you
can do for them with your p~ulverized
! DEATH" His smile changed into {
sardonic az he deposited his victim:
upon the newspaper carefully spread
out on the hearth rug, and sprinkled
his deathly compound with a liberia
hand over and around them. "There,'
said he, "''tis done, see them wriggle
In a short time they will cease TO ex.
ist." They left them in their dealt
struggles and wandered forth into Tho
garden, that he might give full in,
structions as 10 the application oftht
"patent, perfumed, ~pulverized, swift
but silent death, SC" upon a larger
scale. In a few moments. they re-en.
lSISh tAC pdlIOl ~ 'lOOh upon lnt
CHA silly forms of their sacrifices tc
science. But alas! with two.excep.
tions, the newspaper was unoccupied
The curculio had walked of on hi,
ears the measuring worm was taking
the dimensions of the room, which
task he had about completed the Gil.
cumber worms had eaten their way
out, and were making rapid strides fol
their respective homes, each with sew,
eral days rations ofthe "patent: per
fumed, p~ulHerized, concentrated, swif
but silent death, Sc" upon his back
while the two potato bugs were Ell
gagged in a deadly conflict over thu
last remaining grains of the ''patent
%perfumed, pulverized, concentrated
swift but silent death to all malicious
ly disposed insects and worms" The