Middletown transcript., 1875-03-13
STATE OF DELAWARE, March, 18'

STATE OF DELAWARE, March, 1875.
Dear Transcript will you pardon
your correspondent for asking for in
formation on matter which appears to
have taken deep hold upon the people
at this end of the State? But first, Are
you Granger? Ifnot, why not? Il
is the order of the day (and night too,
if you judge from the time of holding
the meetings) for some especial object
to be obtained by the farmers and man
ufacturers. Surely there must be a
grange at your place, and of course you
must belong: for why editors and doc
tors should not be admitted is past my
compheBsion. The one physics, tor
lures and bleeds you to death, and the
other duns you for something that no
one likes to pay, I. e. bis paper at the
end of the year, as dead horse is poor
property. Now l believe you to be a
member and will therefore ask, Why does
it take two weeks to get initiated into
the mysteries Of breaking your neck, or
some bones at least, in riding. or trying
to ride, billy goat over narrow bridges,
through ploughed felds--and miserably
ploughed at that-climbing fences. must
have been worm fences from the way
that goat jumped: he was into bitches.
over stones, hard ground, plough skips,
harrow streaks, and the d. knows
what else he would have gone over if
Pomona had not seized him by the
horns and promised him some apples to
60 it easier, which quieted him, when
your unlucky cor. thought he saw
chance to escape. So, getting on terra
frnaa, I made for the door as l sup
posed. but brought up in rye field
that Adam might have sowu: for Of all
bristles on grain that rye beat. Words
won't do it justice. so l will give up
the job. Being very warm after such
severe exercise [ concluded to take off
my coat GARNER like) Just as l got
one arm out, bang went something
on went that coat, instanter. This SO
startled the line q was not alone) that
every fellow, had be been blown up and
not hurt, would have thought it a part
of the programme.
The Ladies all at once broke out into
musical strains so soul-inspiriDg that
the perspiration ran in rivulets down
the furrowed and bronzed cheeks of the
nevices, which filled the Worthy Mas
ter with merriment, to such degree
that he dare not take his name off his
book, but stood with white face and |
down cast eyes. uttering the most fear
full and terrible imprecations and
upon their heads
if they dare tell the wives Of their
bosoms one word of anything they
say, Git being at the same time so dark
that we could not have seen had we had
a lighted candle) or heard, that ever a
scared cuss listened to. knew how many
started with me when l went into that
room. All know now is, there we're
some ahead Of me and some behind me-
Had I not forgotten | would tell you
how many. I'll bet drinks for the line,
the steward. that if we arc
left to ourselves and never told how,
we will never see the inside of that room
again, as grangers for do not think
there is one Of the number who recol-
leets either the signs or countersigns,
for there is as many of them as there is
On the Zodiacal man in the almanac.
have often wondered to myself of
what good be was. The Grange has
explained the mystery.
You see by this, that several Of the
farmers hereabout, led by the greatly
,ove:ed desideyutuna, natural to all, to
get our wants and wishes gratifed at
he least expense, made up our minds
% join the Grange, believing the tale
,ne of them told us about buying a suit
If clothes, and that when the salesman
discovered his customer to be granger,
,aue him the vest and pants, he, the
Granger, only paying for the coat.
We joined If you are member,
please tell US. through your paper, why
We had that goat to ride. They are
,ot used by farmers We like to ride
With a pair Of horses to wagon. If
you don't belong, why then, of course,
7ou don't know anything about it. and
needn't answer speak for the line
when / say they don't know anything
about it either A GRANGER.