The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1875-05-06
CHARLIE JoHNsON's PICNIC.

Charlie johnson went to a picnic
the other day.
Charlie is flrst-rate fellow, only
he's terribly bashful.
He called to see Miss Jones one
night. He never would have been
guilty of such an act, had she not met
him on coming out of church-corner-
ed him right up by the steps where all
the girls could see him-and made
him promise to come round the next
night-before she'd leave him GO.
So the following evening Charlie
arrayed himself like lily of the field,
and started for the Jones'.
This happened last winter.
He got there about eight o'clock. 1t
was quite dark. Charlie mounted the
steps; rang the bell; and then-his
courage failed him. He cleared the
six steps at one leap and fed down
the street. t'lsf'st -
Bridget went to the door. Nobody
there. Old Jones hailed Bridget and
asked her who rang the bell. "Shure
it's some Of of-of thin lads that do be
ringin' the bill livery night, and-and
thin run away-bad look to thin, at
arl and at arlp
"Once more to the breech. dear
friends" !" was Charlie's soliloquy, as he
sowly .retraced his steps. With glad
and gallant tread did he re-ascend the
front step and blithely pulled the bell.
But nimbIy did he again descend the
steps and swiftly disappear up the
street reaching the quarter post in fer
ty seconds.
Bridget at the door; same result as
before. Bridget waxed wroth. And
old Jones vowed he'd fix that internal
whelp; so he got a piece Of stout
broom cord tied one end of it to the
iron railing On the further side of the
steps, about a feot higher than the top
step; then passed it through hole in
the filigree work on the other side OF
the steps at the same height; brought
the end of the string through the
blind of the bay window, thence
into the parlor: afterwards he went
out and slackened the string, SO as to
have it lay fiat aleng the steps where
nobody would notice it in coming up
but where, if it were tightened up
from within the house, after one had
gone up the step, enc would be some
what apt to "notice" it in going down
especially if one were in a hurry.
Then Mr.. Jones sat down in the
parlor; grasped one end of the string
and waited for the bell to ring.
Bridget not aware that the old gent
had set the trap, had a ''little some
thing" fixed up herself. She repaired
to the kitchen took the boiling tea
kettle from the range meandered up
stairs with it; sat down by widow
right over the front door and waited,
too, for the bell to ring.
1t rang.
The old man pulled the string
Bridget emptied the kettle-and Char
lie
Well, it didn't hurt Charlie much.
That is to say, he was able in a couple
of weeks to sit up and have his bed
made and inside of month ne could
get around very nicely on a pair of
crutches. To be cure, six of his eye
teeth were never found and his lett
eye looked as If he'd run a knot-hole
into it. But he didn't mind such lit
tie thing as that; still he never SEEM
ed to care to go down TO the Jones
afterward, as sort OF GOODNESS, as il
were, had sprung up between them.
Nowadays, when Charlie wishes to
experience the ecstatic delight OF a
call on Miss Jones, lie goes out and
lays down in the road in front of his
house and lets hack run over him.
It's just as much fun and not near so
far to go. He thinks that by the time
he can let full grown omnibus drive
over the bridge of his nose, withoui
making him wink. he'll be able to
stand another whirl down at Jones'.
Shall have to defer the picnic story.