The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1875-08-26

is she? Has the girl two natures, or is
the mystery only in me? hope my brain
is not giving way under pressure; but why
does she do such provoking, unaccounta
bic things? Not that anything she does
is remarkable in itself, now that come to
think OF It, only her looks and acts and
ways, at different times, contradict each
other so strangely. After all, l believe
the difference is in my own mind and moi
in her. How else can it be that whereas
at one time l feel such strange attraction
toward her. at another feel an equally
strange repulsions No, repulsion is too
strong word; it is rather an absolute in
difference, utterly devoid even of admira-
ton. So strong has this feeling grown
that the instant she appears feel, Nov
1 shall like her." or, Now shall hate
her." and the instinct ne yer deceiveS.
Last night Eta went to a ball or some
thing of the sort. AT any rate, she came
shimmering stuff with wrcaths of pink
heath Il think) trailing all over it. She
stopped moment to clasp bracelet on
her round, white arm, and the subtle
charm and attraction were stronger than
ever.
A few minutes afterward I saw her
in the parlor. The gas was turned up
to its full height and the win
dows were wide open. Apparently she
was posing and practicing before
the pier-glass. Nothing in that? OF
course not. We all like women to be at
their ease, and how can they be that if
they are not sure of looking well, and
how could they be sure of looking well if
pier glasses did not exist? But surely she
need not have pranced and ambled as she
did before that mirror, with sidewise
sweepings of her train, with airy tlutter-
ings of her fan, with bridlings and mine
ings, perkings of chin and droopings Of
eyelids. l was glad when the carriage was
announced and the house was left to dark
ness and silence.
April 27.-No chance of my being out
and about for two weeks yet, so the doctor
tells me. Perfect stiffness under penalty
of lameness for life. Wretched for man
in full health to be tied by the leg in this
way! Once in a while am tempted to
give it all up and go out into life again.
am tired of fighting this incessant thirst
to be in the midst Of the stir and hustle,
one OF mass Of struggling atoms, and not
amere solitary, sluggish molecule, a sort
of hermit-crab, sitting here "my lane'
and fighting off ennui. But-lame for
life? Well, it wouldn't be pleasant. The
words gave me rather shivery feeling as
they dropped so glibly from the doctors
lips. To hobblc through life more dis
had better eat my heart out here little
longer than to gnaw it in vain for the rest
of my life.
l wonder i'll am becoming too much in
terested in that girl over there? Certainly
watch for her eagerly and count the day
blank when | have not seen her. Non
sense! 1t is only the utter lack of any ex-
element in my life which makes me
think Of her at all; and then the mystery
about her or about my feelings toward her
keeps up the interest. Only let me get
out once in the great, surging sea of New
York and mix with other men and then
Eta may go-it would be ungrateful as
we'll as impolite to suggest Jericho as
her goal-she may go whittier she will
But suppose, just suppose, the feeling
should not be shaken off? Well, it
would be awkward, certainly. But that is
out of the question. am morbid and
nervous now; but let me only regain my
full strength once more and all these
dreams and imaginings will vanish like a
morning mist.
The back room in which Eta oftenest
appears is not her bedroom, evidently. 1t
seems to be a sewing room, study, nursery
"a sort of city of refuge for the odds and
ends of household life. Sometimes l see
her sitting at the window and sewing
Somehow think l like her best then.
Her little fingers fly in and out so deity
with such dainty twists and turns, which
dimple the knuckles and show the pretty
wrists in hundred new and graceful at
titudes. l look at my great, clumsy fin
gers and laugh to myself to think how
miserably l potter over single button
and what wretched botch it is when it is
sewed on at last.
She is busy bee, this Eta. hardly
ever see her unemployed. never partic-
ularly admired. energy or industry in
women. 1t is apt to make them uneasy
and uncomfortable to deal with. Their
energy is given to breaking out in unex-
pected directions, and their industry to
running into new and startling channels.
think like woman to he rather slow
and lazy and Indifferent, content to sit
quietly and do nothing but look pretty
and talk gently and sensibly. This being
the case l wonder why like Eta least
when she is idle? Sometimes she comes
into the room with a slow and stately
SNCCp. 1uCu huON a. OuCC lutSU BIC Will
do nothing but stand at the window, or
saunter about the room in a futile, pur-
poseless way, and my interest instantly
shine.
like to watch her with the children
her brothers, l suppose. They are romp-
ing, rollicking boys, hearty, sturdy little
fellows, both of them, full Of spirits and
| ;op SIo SO fill of fun to- nd
romp with them lin lady-like way, of
lady-like, l think, and interests herself in
their pursuits Sometimes they hang
about her while she tells them stories. l
can tell that that is what she is doing by the
motions of her lips and the lighting up of
her face. Such bright little face! ltgrows
upon one strangely until am almost
ready to swear that it is as classically
beautiful as that of the Venus di Milo. I
can hear the peals of laughter from the
boys lips, but if Eta laughs too the
sounds are too low to reach me.
The other day, though, she did some
thing that puzzled me. 1t was not my
Eta but the other Eta that did it, for I
have learned to distinguish them thus in
my own mind. She was reading in the
window, dressed for the afternoon evil
IDENTIFY in some sort of pale green stuff that
brought out the rose bloom of her cheeks
and the gold lights of her hair wonderful
ly. The book, by the cover, was novel,
and she was too deeply absorbed in it to
stir when one of the boys crept up behind
her. could not see what he was doing,
but could see his face of sly impish de.
light as he stood there after he had fin.
ished his work, apparently awaiting the
catastrophe. 1t came in minute. At a
quick motion of Etta's head the whole
torrent Of golden hair came ripping and
waving down. The breeze from the win
dow sent it streaming far and wide until
she seemed enveloped in halo of golden
mist. The little wretch had slyly pulled
out every hairpin as he stood there, and
now he clapped his hands and laughed
aloud a hearty peal of boyish merriment
l saw Etta's face; the rose bloom was all
drowned in one scarlet flush which extend.