The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-17

news items.
Four baby wagons met on the side
walk the other day-each compIi-
mented the other with having such a
"pretty baby"-but each went away
satisfied that theirs was the "best
lookingl"
A man has a good deal of cheek
who can come into an editorial room
and cody sit down and go to whist
ling. In fact you can see his cheek
puff out under the process.
A Dubuque testator formerly gave,
devised and ~bequeathed his wearing
apparel to his wife, for the reason
that she had been accustomed to wear
'em during her married life.
AS soon as all the Townships are in
we will report the number of candi-
dates that are willing to be "sacri-
feed" before the Ring Convention.
1lt1 dIC IuhiCl Jus
Of all the diminutive, d%etestable
mortals allowed to sojourn on this
beautiful earth, none are worse than
the tale bearers or tattlers. They
should be branded as things to be
Stunned by the order loving commu-
nifty.
The st. Paul NJ. z. Church of Ea-
ton was packed full on Sunday night
last, to witness the matrimonial cere-
monies and marriage of Miss NC
CHRISTIAN, daughter of Mr.. Daniel
Chrisman, to DR.. B. F. CRUMRINE, of
Eldorado, Preble county.
If the County Commissioners are
too economical to rid the Court House
square of a nuisance, endangering the
health and jeopardizing the lives of
o II citizens, the statutes of the State
can be invoked to force them to do
their plain duty. Let the Board of
Health see to this.
A story is told of a prominent
Granger who lives not far from town,
who mustered a squad of ten and
chased a grasshopper for near an hour
to ascertain whether it was an agent
or middle man from the firm of
Grasshopper & Co., of Kansas.
When a mother cuts her sons hair
with such nice precision and artistic
neatness that the boy is ashamed to
take off his hat when he goes TO bed.
it is about time our domestic institu-
tons were overhauled and remodel
ell.
On the receipt of the news of the
shooting of Tom Mcclellan on Mon
day morning last, Bro. DIX, u tele-
graph operator here; asked the opera
tor at Hamilton, "Who shot him ?"
His reply was: "You are the first
mar that has had impudence enough
to ask the question:" Dix dropped
the subject.
Don't attempt to blow the load
from your shot gun through the tube,
by putting the muzzlc in your mouth
and your foot on the trigger. Just
think what a disagreeable taste it
would leave in your mouth if your
foot slipped and the gun went off.
The editor of the REGISTER init
mates that there are several editors
for the DEMOCRAT. For his benefit
we will say that "Squibob" writes for
us; "Peanuts" writes for US; "Corn
Cob" writes for US "Wiggins" writes
for us. and a number of others in and
around our town. That settles it that
we have no assistance from the city
of Dayton.
We understand the Ring have en-
gagged tho "hole in the ground" in
front Of the Court House, to hold their
County Convention. 1t is an "under-
ground" business, and they want to
show an "eternal fitness of things"
A "war" dance will close the proceed
ings, and the editor from Dayton city
will be present. A "full attendance"
is requested again.
We have 10 objections to friends
dropping in to see us-in fact we are
rather fond of it, and would rather
have them do so than not-but we do
object to the visits OF ONE. We
don't mind them handling type after
we have emptied them in the forms
or on the galleys, neither do we mind
having them come up to our case and
lean both elbows thereon and read
our copy; neither do we mind to stop
setting type right in the middle of a
line and relate the history of printing
from the days of Faust up to the pres
ent time, or else stop and explain
that we don't have to spell backwards,
and that in order to read the type af-
ter they are set up we don't have to
stand on our head or turn ourself in
side and out, &C., SC. We al stand
all this, but when a fellow comes in
whistling "Mollie Darling" II want
to be an Angel" Or GLOW 1 Love
Jesus" or some such an air, it makes
us almost inclined to feel for our "lit-
tie pistol" Gentlemen, don't do it.
prnbIa Hountv Fair