Martinsburg weekly independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1873-1875, 1875-01-16
Observation-Disclosures.

Cheap living Living on excitement.
Bootiess enterprise Going barefoot.
A "put-up job"-Bunker Hill monu-
ment.
The greatest can bat blaze aud pass
away.
Hobby horses are dearer than Arab
steeds.
What barber mustn't do-Lather
his wife.
Something to boot--A lightning rod
agent.
The worst kind Of edueation-1o be
brought up bya policeman.
To poor man with a large family
glory is but of little account.
While Kansas goes hungry, her plains
fume with the scent of dead buffaloes.
Gen. never drew bis sword
but once, and that was in rattle.
A wise man may keep his own coun-
sci; consequently has no Jobs for strange
lawyers.
A Green Bay woman who weighs $50
pounds insists that she is somebody's
darling"
When you hear a row next door, it is
sign the motber-in-law is paying a
visit tothe family.
Halo bonnets probably derive their
name from the exclamation of husbands
when they see the bill.
The young King of Bavaria threatens
to abdicate, but he'd better not. Stu
atoms ara scarce now.
The highest prize in Chinese lottery
Is twenty-seven cents, but the swearing
is just as loud as at Havana.
A Green Bay girl shook an old horse
pistol at her father until he came down
with $50 for new cloak.
An Indiana woman said she must
have a new pair of garters, and ordered
the clerk to cut off two yards of elastic.
A Dutchman describes New Workers
as cherry fine people," who Ego about
der streets sheating each other, and dey
call dat Freshness.
1t must make man feel mean to pay
an old debt because he thinks he's going
to die, ard then have the doctor pull
him through all right.
For sport go to Texas. They have
panthers there thirteen feet long and
exceedingly vigorous; and If you have
no sport, the beasts certainly will.
That farmer understood human ma
ture who said: "If you want to keep
boy at home, don't bear too hard on
the grindstone when he turns the crank.
An Illinois DICTATOR chad 'em" when he
arose and said: "Yes, gentlemen, Wa
terloo was the biggest kind of fight,
but Washington whipped 'em like
wink"
A Covington man died and they put
him on ice, but he awoke in the night
and yelled out; "Wby don't you put
some more wood in that stove ?"-Dan-
bury News.
A wicked man in Davenport being on
his death bed, wished to consult some
proper person regarding his future state.
and they sent for life insurance agent.
Ode of western woer in the sleigh
ing season:
The moon it shines along the snow,
The sky crimson banner,
Oh, wilt thou with me sleighing go,
My lovely red haired Hammer?
Toledo papers announce that there is
plenty of work in that city, but careful
ly conceal the fact tht said work con-
sists of sitting on bench in front Of
coal stove and wishing it were spring.
An exchange remarks: "Now is the
time when prudent parents see to il that
the parts of the boys on which they slide
down hill are properly haf-soled with
leather, tin or sheet-iron,"
An agricultural paper says that kind
words will cure COW of kicking, but
many prefer the old way Of mailing
the critter with a fence rail until her
heart is broke.
Lines-not by Tennyson, but by some
body else:
Those who in quarres interpose,
Must often wipe a bloody nose"
Mr. B. Young, Of Salt Lake City, is
sick nigh unto to death. Mr.. Young is
married mat, and We have great
deal Of sympathy for his wife, but not
enough to go all round.
When boy is sitting on the sunny
side Of horse barn, waiting for his fat