Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-08-19
A short Sketch of an Editor.

Once upon q time an editor, after re-
volYing in his weary mind a few o1
the wearing problems which are the
mysteries of his singular profession,
left the seclusion of his Office and sal
lied forth into the busy world to do
among men as he was done by. He
had long before been disabused of any
impression which might have haunted
his mind that he knew anything about
editing paper, for every man who
came into his Office knew more about
that business than the unfortunate ed
itor did, and never scrupled to tell him
so. But the poor man thought it
would be very agreeable and plsasa Mt
thing to do as other men did, and it
was for the purpose of following gen
eral custom that he went out on this
beautiful day so long ago.
The sun was shining brightly; the
dull distant hum of insect life in the
adjoining country came family to his
ears birds were singing, and so serene
and peaceful was the aspect of nature
that it seemed impossible, in such a
bright beautiful world, there could be
so much misery, wretchedness, wick
edness and total depraYity But there
was all the same, for there was the
editor to prove it.
He went into the Office of a lawyer
with whom he was slightly acquainted.
and, seating himself in a chair, put is
feet on the desk and began to whis tie
''Silver Threads Among the Gold" in
loud tone of whistle The attorney
l0Olxod ockouisod ou1 osl1od that rs.
visitor wanted. He said nothing, but
took bundle of papers from pigeon
hole, and began to look them over
and read out loud. When he had got
through, the indignant lawyer took
his visitor by the neck and gently but
firmly kicked him down stairs.
"And yet, mused the unhappy man
as he brushed off his clothes and went
limping on his way, ''that man was in
my office only day before yesterday
and read three of my articles before
they were published 1t is singular
how different it is when 1 read his"
He went into dry goods store, and
had just time to get behind the coun.
ter when lady came in and asked for
some brown satin.
HYes 'am," he said.
After creating an earthquake in that
part of the store, he followed her di-
rections and got what she wanted.
Glow much do you want ?" he ask
ed, "about half column ?''
She stared
"Thirty or forty-lines be enough p
he inquired. -,
She said she wanted half yard.
"Ah ~ he said. "AbOut eighteen
squares-yes, yes"
"And cut on the bias" she contin
ued.
Certainly" he said "buy as much
as you please" And he began to teal
the goods in various shapes when the
merchant collared him and put him out
"And yet" the poor man mused as
he went on, "that very man wrote two
articles for the paper the other day,
declaring that they were better thar
anything | had written for six months
and although seYenty-fve subscribers
stepP their paper wfIen they wer.
published, he never sent anything
around to pay for /"
He turned sadly into drug store
teok prescription from poor woman
standing there, locked it wisely over
and then took q little quinine, arsenic
morphine and strychnine, put them vi
in powders, and told the woman Il
give her husband one every two hour
until he didn't complain any NOR
about his head. AS she went out O
the door one of the powders spilled or
dog's back, and the animal died il
three seconds. The editor was arrest
ed, and only released on giving sol
emn promise to support the sheriff fol
re- election.
Chow is it," he wondered, ''that al
classes of men, of all occupations
have found time not ouly to perfec
themselves in their own business an6
professions, but also to master mint
more thorougly than 1 have been abl,
to do by giving my entire time ant
strength to it,,
He sighed as he walked into abani
He put his head in. at the paving tel
ler's window and shouted "Hello!'' a
loud as he could roar. Then b
drummed on the glass with his finger
and was forcibly elected by the porter
81 give it up," he said. ''I am tn
most worthless of mankind. I dom
know how to attend to anybody's bus
mess but my own:" and so he wake
drearily back to his dis NAL sanctun
where he found seven men, four G
them perfectstrangers to him, occupy
ing the chairs, pouring over the e1
changes, reading the proofs and con
menting thereon, and making fun G
his pet articles. He sat down on tn
wood box and tried to think up a leade
for the next days paper, and droppe
q tear as he recalled his boyhood'
happy days, and the time that woul
elspse before the pirate, sitting on hi
own particular arm chair would q
through cutting the best things out o
the latest papers and putting them i
his hat. But he looked out of tn
? window and saw an expatriated locs
/ trying to write up his notes agains
the side of brick house on the othe
t side of the street, and felt some glea
e OF comfort from this company in h
a misery, and took courage.
Moral-There was moral to th
story when we commenced, but v
I have got so far from the commenc
8 ment that we have forgotten what
e was. Never mind; readers alwa,
e skip the morals anyhow.
SOuthdOWn Sheep.