New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1875-11-06
ABOUT AN ASSERTION.
BY NJ QUAD.


have great respect for Miss Anna Dick
inson. True, she can't bake loaf of bread,
darn sock, put down a carpet, or sift
pumpkin, but on the other hand she refuses
60 wear hustle, is not affected, and agrees
with NE that goats are a great nuisance in
cities,
| saw the other day an assertion by Miss
Dickinson that the present generation of
men, both married and single, was a terri
bly, selfish generation, and she added a com
plant of a general lack of civility toward
unprotected females. don't want to deny
that am man, nor yet deny Miss Dickin-
sons assertion. | want to explain.
When got into an omnibus in Chicago
one evening not long ago to change over to
another depot some ones maiden aunt was
my fellow passenger. She had three or four
bundles and a trunk to come by the bag
gage wagon, and she was not a handsome
woman nor young woman. If l was to be
put on oath I'd swear that she was one of
the homlest women l ever saw, and I've
been all over New Jersey and Indiana.
l knew the woman had to change cars,
and knew she ought to be glad OF a little
help, so slid along the seat and asked,
"G0ing east!'
She didn't reply, and thinking she might
be little deaf, called out again:
"GOing east!
She whirled around, gave me q look of
rage and contempt, and Kissed out:
II know you, ycurg man! and if you
speak to me again IN have you j4iled!'
There l was. trying to be civil and oblig.
ing and to disprove Miss Dickinsons asser-
lions, and the woman took me for pick
pocket or a murderer. l made another
effort when we reached the depot, saying:
MADAM, l am going East, and ii you take
the same train I'll cbeerfully show you to
the ticket office and help you to get your
baggage checked"
'Pll help you if you don't go away from
mel" she snarled, and she added that if
Justice were done I'd be in State prison.
She got confused in the crowd, failed to
find her trunk, and when the train went
out she was cantering around the depot
with certainty of having to wait there
eight long hours for another train. l could
have had her aboard the train with five
minutes to spare, but she wouldn't let me;
and l expect she will some day publish an
assertion that men are uncivil and selfish
When the clouds gathered the other night
and the rain came pouring down had an
umbrella. This may seem incredible to
umbrella owners, but l anu on oath. Re-
memberihg Miss Dickinson's assertion, and
overtaking lady with new hat and
choice raiment on, l said
Madam, shall be glad to loan you my
umbrella. You can send it to me in the
morning"
eyes, know you would" she snarled in
reply, .,,
She halted turned around, and then and
there remarked as follows:
'Its none O. your business about my hat,
and If You don't leave me I'll have you ar
rested"
Now, l may be ugly in look, but she
couldn't have seen 1t on account of the
darkness, and no one has right to judge
nj tafo ftvyoc hx-n srl,
low-keyed voice. wanted to be civil and
obliging, and would cheerfully have cuff
tered rheumatic twinges in order to save
her raiment, but she wouldn't let me.
Two or three weeks ago as sat in pas
senger coach, with young lady in the seat
next ahead, suddenly remembered that
the magazine which had finished an hour
before might relieve the monotony of her
journey. passed it over with the remark:
"Perhaps this may help you to while
away the time"
She turned square around, her eyes
flashed, and abe spitefully Kissed:
How dare you speak to met"
There had it, but l am naturally obsti-
nate, and replied:
81 merely wished to be courteous"
She turned around again, and again her
eyes flashed as she said:
If you speak to me again I'll tell the
conductor"
NO, tn6n, assert ON my solemn Oath thaG
the girl had over seven hundred frsckles on
her face, a stub nose, red hair, long, bony
neck, and two of her front teeth were gone.
She couldn't have reaso led that was struck
with her beauty, or was about to propose
an elopement, or intended to follow her and
carry her off to some cave, just as novelists
have pirates and brigands do. I'd like
Miss Dickinson to explain why she wouldn't
let me be obliging and civil.
These are not the only cases. I've been
rebuffed SO often that now when see wo-
man galloping around the depot to fall over
satchels and, run over trunks in her wild
efforts to find her missing bundles I'm Sc
eretly glad, and earnestly hope she'll miss
the train. If ! sit in car and hear them
anxiously asking each other If it is the
right train / hope it isn't-hope they'll get
carried thousand miles out of their route.
If notice one trying to put down the car
window and it refuses to bulge, / look the
other way, and hope the cold stream Of air
will give her the quick consumption and
devastate happy hearthstone. Let Miss
Dickinson remember that / wanted to be
courteous, civil and obliging, but that her
sex drove mo into being selfish and mean
-Nep Fork Grdphic. -Ha