Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-03-11
ITEMS OF INTEREST

THE spring bonnets are to have very
high crowns
FASHIONABLE funerals are costly un-
dertakings.
IT costs $50 to bury Boston poodle as
he should be buried.
A BAD thing to put up with-An unac-
commodating landlord.
THE Centennial building in Phnadel-
phia will cover twenty acres, and to
lessen the fatigue of thorough visit, an
elevated railway is projected.
BOSTON has a Good Samaritan who an
nually calls at the schoolhouSes, finds
out those of the pupils who are thinly
clad, and provides warm clothing for
them.
THE people of Nevada have about
come to the conclusion that their State
Mineralogist is an expensive luxury that
can be dispensed with. He costs 49, 900
per annum.
Mr.. CARRUTu, a Northern Nebraska
man, lives on a farm which is six miles
square, and all surrounded by a hedge
fence. The house is set three miles back
from the road
rhode ISLAND is warmly discussing
! the expediency of establishing home
for discharged prisoners, and prison
er's aid association has already been es-
tablished for the purpose.
The recent extreme cold weather in
Kentucky froze not only the ground but
the tobacco fly in the chrysalis, so that
there will be fewer tobacco-worms to in
fest the crop next season.
1t is comfort to mention the fact that
Gen Myers has promised to reform the
signal service and give the country
balmy weather He proposes to make
the mercury slide up through as many
degrees as a graduate of German uni
verSity.
An Omaha woman had her baby girl
christened " February" because she was
born during that month, and her hus-
band, when he heard the name pro
nounced in church by the preacher,
hoped on to bench and yelled, 81 for
bid the bansm
y YOUNG lady of Troy, N. Y, received
a singular valentine in the shape of
box containing a beefs heart pierced
with golden arrow of elegant manu-
facture, set with jewels, and estimated
to be worth at least seventy five dollars.
She fed the heart to her pet dog and will
retain the arrow as a mementO of the
calf who sent it.
THAT was an irreverent youth who, to
his aged parent, desiring to retire from
the retail trade and take a Government
position, said: You in the postofffce!
Nice old party you'd be in the postoffice.
What could you do in the postoffice, eX-
cept stand in the doorway with your
mouth open for folks to wet postage
stamps on your tongue?"
IT IS safe to say that Anthony Prince,
Of Baltimore, is no gentleman No man
Of refined manners or gentle culture
would SO far forget himself as to spit in
a lady's face and slap both of her cheeks.
This was what Mr.. Prince did to Miss
Catharine Fricasse the other day, and
right roundly has he had to pay for the
privilege. The jury brought in a verdict
for the plaintiff Of $4,000 damages.
A NAN in Dakota writes to friend that
the thermometer has been ranging from
% to 30 degs. below zero; that going
to bed is a serious matter, and getting up
is still more so; that he sleeps under six
pairs Of blankets, with two pairs of
socks and two wooden nightgowns on,
and has to consume large quantities of
pork grease in order to keep up internal
combustion.
WE'LL my son." said Detroit father
to his eight-year-old son the other night,
what have you done today that may be
set down as a good deed?" "Gave a
poor boy five cents" replied the hopeful
All, ha! that was charity, and charity
is always right. He was an orphan boy,
was he?" {" I didn't stop to ask, =" replied
the boy; 81 gave him the money for
licking boy who spit on my dinner
! asketm-Detr0it Free Press
LADY BARKER in a recent work gives
her ideal of a model boy, as follows: If
could make model boy I'll tell you
what he should be like. He should love
cold water and hate lie. He should be
frank and unsuspicious, as becomes a
noble, trusting nature, and yet he should
be neither silly nor soft. He should
have plenty of manias. He should have
an appetite like wolf, for should wish
him to be tall and strong; but he must
not be bit greedy. He should not be
ashamed of loving and reverencing all
that is good and holy and pure, but with
| nothing of the molly coddle about him.
He should have fine, sweet temper, yet
he should'be, as the Yankee song says,
An orkerd man in a row, and he should
know how to take care o. himself with
his fists"
On the evening train from Albany, re-
cently,was woman bound for WestfeId,
who persisted in requesting the afable
=, IN