Knoxville weekly chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1875, 1875-01-06
GIVING HELr To rHE HEATHER
"Didn't Hear Seine One Ever Say "
word About Afrtca.''

A man about thirty years old, wearing a
battered plug hat and seedy clothes, looking
as hungry as man who had been wrecked
on an iceberg, softly entered Gratoit ave-
nue. saloon yesterday, and leaning over the
bar whispered to the proprietor:
My dear sir, am canvsssing for sub
scriptions for the benefit of the heather"
Ish dat zo?' replied the saloon keeper,
rinsing glass.
Yes, my friend that is so" continued
the man, taking out q very greasy pass-
book. I" Yes, am collecting money for the
benefit Of the poor heather, who are living
in state of vice and ignorance. Some put
down ten dollars, some five, some one; all
give something. Here is the book, and you
can give such an amount as you think
best. "
"Ish it betition TO dem common goun.
Gil ~ inquired the saloonist, as he looked at
the book.
No, sir, you do not understand my OBJ
ject. / am collecting subscriptions for the
benefit Of the heather, and you can write
your name and give me such an amount rs
your conscience directs.
"Vere ish dem hesthens?' inquired the
beer. seller, looking coldly at the strangers
battered hat.
ain Africa, replied the agent, in far
off Africa, where all is gloom and loneli--
ness because the heathen has no educa-
ton. "
"And vot country is dat Africa in p in
quired the saloonist.
my dear man, Africa is 4 country-a
great big country, far over the deep blue
sea. Is it possible that you never heard of
Africa ~
az hat lived in Toledo and Chicago, but
didn't hear some one ever say word about
Africa.
well, that is neither here nor there.
am authorized to collect subscriptions for
the heather, who is running about in state
of nakedncss and sinfulness, and who must
have bread for his mind and be brought to
realize that he should live for something
besides this life.
Yah, dat is SO, " replied the saloonist in
a reflective tone.
You contribute whatever SUN you may
think best, and forward it to Boston b.
first mail, where it is turned into Bibles,
and the Bibles shipped to Africa. Most PEG.
pie esteem it privilege to be allowed 10
subscribe to this fund. VIII you write your
name down."
81 think / will, replied the man, and he
hunted up his pencil, and after much labor
wrote his name on one of the pages and
handed the book back with the remark:
al dunno if you can read it.
"That is all right but you have neglect
ed to mark the amount of your contribution.
Let's see-will you say a dollsr?'
"Vhat?'
"Will you give the sum of one dollar to
the heather ~
"Hal What you spoke about?"
"Will you give me dollar to forward to
the poor, benighted heather ?"
MOney-give you money!
Yes-for the heather r.
"Gif you Won dollar ~
ayes, dollar for the benighted race who
are dwelling in darkness.
The saloon. keeper looked at him for a
half minute, aud then, reaching down for a
club said:
You'd better 60 out Ply dat door
sign dat pook to get dat heather some close
by de poormaster and dat is bleuty. If you
SHAY here some little while more l shall
hit you nit dis Club on de head r.
"My dear"
AGO aus nit dat door ~ yelled the ss-
loon-keeper, running from behind the bar,
and the canvasser bad to 60.