The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1875-07-10
MISCELLANY.

No man can live piously or die
righteOusly without a wife.
It's sad house where the her
crows louder than the cock.
There are two things a woman
cannot do-poke a fire and sharp
en- lead pencil.
In buying horses and taking &
wife shut your eyes and commend
yourself to God.
The old maid stood on the burning deck,
Whence all the girls had fed.
Nol would she leave until convinced
That every man was dead.
Several young American ladies
are at present in Paris, studying
the art of displaying their ankles,
without appearing to do it inten-
ti0nally.
Unless a Milwaukee girl can
take a brick in each hand and
make eight feet and four inches
at standing jump, she rarely
gets admitted to the best society.
Young men should not make
remarks about a young lady as
she passes on the street. It's
none of their business if her bus
tie don't fit.
II am going-I know I amp
said MissiSsippian; "and l be-
lieve l would go easier if Jim
would get down his fiddle and
play 'Sored-heeled Sally once
morew jim did.
A Sheriff in Kansas whose I'M
pleasant duty it was to put a
widow and her children ont Of a
house on which she had failed to
complete payment, hunted up an
other house for her and paid a
months rent in advance.
An economical Connecticut girl
refused to be married by the cler-
gyman Of her lovers church be-
cause another parson owed her
two dollars for knitting stockings,
and was too poor to pay the cash.
A petrifed rattlesnake, meas
uring ten feet, with twenty five
rattleS, has just been found in a
coal mine thirty feet below the
surface in Alton, Ill. The for
nation is said TO be perfect. and
represents snake in the act of
creeping.
A Milwaukee boy has swallow
ed half a dozen steel buttons, and
his mother doesn't have to scream
for him when he is out on the
street playing with those Cluck-
ersOn boys. She just brings a
magnet TO the door and he flies it
like a needle to a pole.
A careful, industrious and pains
taking hen is perfect fortune to
her owner. With eggs at twenty
three cents a dozen, Just think
what one lone, lorn hen can do by
paying strict attention to business
instead of standing around on one
leg like circus actor.
care the young ladies of the
present day fit for wives?" asked
a lecturer of his audience. "They
are fit for husbands" responded
a feminine voice; "but the trOu-
BILE is that yOu men are not fit for
wivesp The applause was great ,,
and so was the discontinue of
the lecturer.
Amman will carry five hundred |
dollars in his vest pocket, but a |
woman needs a morocco porte
monnaie as large as a fist, and too |
heavy to be carried in the pocket,
to escort a fifty-cent scrip, a re-
ceipt for making jelly cake, and !
two samples Of dress goods, down |
town and back. every pleasant |
afternoon Washington Chronicle. |
I'd like to be edytur.
An in my sanctum stand.
The door a staudin' open
And big club III my hand
Then let the cuSs who didn't like
Some articles I'd writ,
Come softly DER the threshold,
I'd reckon he'd get hit;
I'd hand him one rite on the g0urd,
Among his brains aud things,
An send him fiummixin up thar
To sport pair OF wings,
In the First Masonic Lodge Of
Jerusalem, it is said, the master
is an American, the past master
an EngliShman, the senior war
den German, the junior warden
a native, the treasurer Turk,
the secretary a Frenchman, the
senior deacon a Persian, and the
Junior deacon a Turk. There are
Mohammedans and
Jews in the lodge.
Bill SmoOt, of Pike comfy, Ca,
says: 81 hereby announce myself
as a candidate for Kurrener for