Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-09-30
ITEMS OF INTEREST,
Do TEA roses grow on tea grounds?

ana but single thought.
Come where my nose lies bleeding, ,
is the title of new ditty. 1t is played on
catarrh.-DaTbury NescS.
ONE bol5 of lightning knocked down
seventy-two telegraph poles for an Iowa
line, and it was only baby storm at that.
GEN. SPINNER estimates that there are
100000 lead nickels in circulation, and
50 if you get one you needn't feel 1attered
about it.
THERE is something capriciOus about a
boys memory He cannot tell you how
he tore his jacket five minutes after the
accident
THE front-gate season is at its high
noon, and messages between the young
and romantic are nightly stamped by pri-
yate posts.
A NAN in Phoenix was badly injured
last Saturday by spider-it was an iron
one and his wife had hold of the handle
Fulton Times.
CONNECTICUT turns out a cucumber five
feet long, but they've got to cut it in two
to pickle it, and that's soothing strip for
the rest of us.
IT is vexing thought to most men that
q collar box occupies little more space
than any pocket that ever was made for
an honest man.
IT is hard to tell which will bring the
most pleasant expression into a woman's
face-to tell her that her baby is heavy or
her bread light.
LET us rejoice that the direct cable has
been put in repair again. The mermaids
once more have conveniences for perform.
ing gymnastics
AN ENGLISH philosopher comes forward
and remarks that the earth is 1888, 541
years old. None of us were there and we
can't knock a single year Off
A CHICAGO woman says Of sleeping cars
It's so nice for one to lie there and won
der where the smash-up will take place
and how many will be killed"
WHEN San Francisco elects a Superin-
tendent Of Police he is given triumphal
ride in carriage. When he goes out of
office he is given a ride on rail.
The hard times have made gravestones
so cheap in Vermont that thrifty people
there are dying off rapidly, just to take
advantage Of the bargains offered.
No ONE but a close observer of human
nature has noticed that lovers always bite
the top of the gate pickets as they stand
to say q few words more before separating.
CANADA is not going to stick to Friday
as hangman's day any more, but will
swing murderer off most any day that he
wants to go. This disposition to oblige a
man is commendabIe
THEY even tolerate such a brief-named
man as Frank Tubb near Schoodywob-
skooksis Lake, in Maine. Frankly speak
ing, the OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES ought
Tubb be ashamed Of themselves.
IT is understood that Mrs. Sheridan has
gone so far as to refuse Philip the selection
OF his own neckties; and it seems to us
that when tyranny reaches thus far it IS
time for war,-R0cheSter Democrat
A CONSCIENTIOUS farmer in Lewiston
Me, wiped the mud from his cart wheels
before permitting his load of hay to go on
the scales to be weighed. But such men
are never sent to the State Legislature
INDUSTRY is but poorly encouraged in
Trenton, N. j. A thief stole twenty-five
ladies' watch chains there in one night,
and daylight revealed to him the fact that
every one of them came from a dollar
store.
THERE is one Canada Custom House
official who doesn't imagine that the
weight of the whole government rests on
his shoulders, but he was dying at last
accounts and didn't want his name men
toned.
THE Danbury Neacs isn't dead journal
yet by any means, but continues at inter
walls to hit the nail on the head with aston
ishing force and precision 1t says /:
What this country really needs is a good
five-cent cigar"
MANY otfenses may be forgiven; but
that charity is an unknown quantity in
this world which can wink at the act of
the man, or at the man himself, who saws
pyanner and pyazzer
Miss HULETT, the Chicago lawyer, re-
fuses to have anything to do With divorce
cases. She says that "any woman who
will marry a man ought to be forced to
live with him" There seems to be
philosophy there somewhere.