South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1875-11-26

ycurgster. And the old lady, ..lit' up
on him with the coffee pot.
a Coon JoKE.-The Danvillc (Ky.)
AGcOcte SAYS: Bishop hayanaugh. of
the Methodist Episcopal Church South.
LETT for California few days ago. where
he will be engaged for the next several
months in attending TO lis duties on the
Pacific coast. We never see Bishop
kavanaugh's name mentioned but what
We are reminded OF an anccdote we re-
member 10 nave heard Mr., J ohm +. Tim
norman Of LcS.ngton, (the publisher OF
the ola Danville Irib"ne,) relate several
years ago, with good deal ofzest. The
Bishop, in early life, like 8fr. thinner
man, was q practical printer. One day
q good sister, IN conversation with him.
asked: Bishop, is it true that Won was
once q printer" "Yes, madam" he
promptly replied. with twinkle in his
eye, II have pulled the devils tail mn.
ny a day until my hands were blistcrcd -
The good lady was somewhat startled
Mt the remark, but was entirely relieved
when the Bishop explained That the ode
wills tail was only the bar handle OF an
old Washington hand-press that he had
pulled" during the days OF his apprcn-
ticeship in country Office"
toT"You haven't opened your mouth
during the whole session. said au NJ. y.
to q fellow member. "Oh. yes. | have"
was he reply: Il yawned through the
whole Of your speech"
tc5@"Nlike. have YOU settled that affair
with Lewis ycj?" yes, he kicked me
out Of the s.oop last week, and since
tina, he has stopped bothering me-"
GED Nc THE FEEs.-The Bowling
Green O5serre. says: There Is jus.
ticl Of the peace living not very far from
here, who IS occasionally called on 10 mar.
~ couple. After performing thc We
~ interesting ceremony. the usual qpes-
ton is: ''Wcll, Squire, Ao8 mach do
owo you?' The reply invariably is
"Nlll. . always lc, tue DO. 5uit them
selves about -ha' " ncr they ceJ q
LJmely locking sort Of girl, they never
feel Ike payin more tlun > dollar and
half thala just what the law allows
me; but whom thoJ sc. iolerab.e fair
locking ore they generally pay ne five
dJlisrs. ana when she Is real COOL look
inc, they never think o. giving me less
than ten. don't say Il to taLtcr YOU.
but l DO think YOU have The sweetest
looking LITTLE wife ] ever sew. Oh -
you're q lucky dog
And then tic poor fellow, with exul.
TAFT n in lie look, md his heart almost
kicking buttons oil MS vest. silently
tf Ce.s = a. 90 l.
squire, here's a do,la., .a.d ia bring
You a lo~d ofwood next week, sure"
E5TThe la.ca, sneak.th,cr d7lcc l. g.
very shrewd one. At CalcsDure ILL.,.
butcher was scryinr alely iu th.-i...
anu just rs she stepped ont Of the door
n stranger who had been apparently
wnitir. us .y~a. picked mp r.81 oil
the floor, with the remU,. that he -uess-
co it was dropped by tie lg}y who bad
just stepped out. or course Tie butch
e. tool. &c. aud ran half o block after
The lady, only 10 discover fh.t 4. wa,
n, hers. On returning 70 the shop hc
found that the stranger was gone. AMI
also all the money I'm 'ho cosh drawer.
The ring YVES y1iucl,7s, Of course.
IVA young New Torl, woman. twor.
ty.'ye wears g ~. wIJlc ty inc pJ5tl1~.
ter OF odG i'ra~- 200 who was au cu..r,
f.r-0~o- 20 to-. stating that chic WIS
poor and wanted j., 10 10 California GO
teach. Several gentlemen male uD q
purse Tor her, and she went. proved ,
capital teacher refunded tho money
married auOtd,. postmaster. ou1. when
no r.. /. t...r.t...f 1..r t.r. l..t... al t......