The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1875-03-31
Variety.

Variety.
The best Scotch yarns-Sir Walter scOtt's
novels.
Journeymen tailors in China receive two cents
per day.
New year calls-caIs on the pOcket-bOOk for
presents.
A nay that always lights up a wOmnn's despair
Rament
What animals are often seen at funeral ?
Black kids.
The great labor question Of the day is how to
avoid labor.
Popped corn fnds a ready sale in the legisls-
tive balls Of South Carolina.
Comic almanncs are among the most pleasant
ANIMALS, weather or 10.
Haste makes waist. Young ladies should lin
ger over tbeirmeals, accordingly.
The photograph business improves because new
features are constantly introduced.
An games Of chance, except running for Office
will be suppressed by law in Virginia
Senator Ferry, OF Connecticut who has been
ailing for long time is now Ferry well.
A Milwaukee man who needed some action and
regular exercise was advised TO mix his own cock
tails
These solemn old pumps, the milk producers,
held meeting in Boston the other day, to CON-
plain OF low rates.
EthuOlOgical query for the Southern States Is
desceDdent Of Ham more apt than other people
to behave ike hog
A Sillygism The good die young. Brigham
the Mormon will die Young. Therefore, Bingham
is good.-LoIreH Courier
The only certain way for man to win $40 on
horserace is to give all their riders $50 apiece
70 lei some one horse win.
A jaw eight feet long has been unearthed in
Wisconsin. 1t is supposed to have belonged to
lady Of the miocene age.
A ST Croix girl in a ct of anger because she
couldn't get her foot into q small shoe, seized q
oarvingkn aud cut Of her little toe.
An Arkansas grocer has been sent to the peni-
teutEry for six years for shooting man who kept
helping himself to the crackers"
Caudle says that bis wife, at least, whatever
may be the experience Of census takers with 9TH
ers OF her sex, is always ready to tell her rage.
A lecturer on modern education said very SOL
emny TO hs audience. Parents, you may have
children, or if Dot, your daughters may have"
When our American young men return from
trip abroad their principal knowledge Of foreign
parts consists Of parting their hair in the middle.
The song Oftbe rivers iu Maine is almost husbed
BY the drought. As the oldest Inhsbitsnt OBJ
serves, the AroostoOk is scarcely dew-Wet its
solow
The Pbiladelphians are not more secure because !
they affect BIC numbers for their houses. A bur
gur broke into No. s.6ll Barring street, the other
night
A French wit said OF man who was exceed
ingy Fat that nature only made him to show how
far the human skin would stretch without
breaking.
The latest case Of Incidence is reported Of John |
Hae- who in writing his pane simply uses the
letter and punches hole in the paper for the
remainder.
An increase 10 the number Of divorces 10 En-
gland is attributed to higher wages. Poor peO-
pie could not previously save enough money to
pay lawyers.
It's The thing 10 import indoor men" and
people who come back from Europe bring. with
tie rest Of their -fxings," & German or Italian
MAJOR dono"
One Of those Vermont ghosts speaks up and
calls Dr.. Beard an ass. II the ghost would only
sia! naieriaiizs3 long enough it would be accom-
1oisiea with libel suit.
The young ladies' Of Rockford. Ill.,, have formed
oo-oPeziive ssif-eseortlug church and party
gong society" the object of which is TO make
he yOuag men Of the period more useless than
ever
Ibs Welsh citizens Of Utica, n. 7. are going.
80 ssys the O5ss-uer, to have grand celebration
O The Elseddfod under the directions OF the
G-aunarchlyn. And noE our readers, Of course.
know al about II.
4 saeFilegiOus burglar recently broke into al
hP'scopal church At Henderson. Ky, and stole
Two aarasols- nrror. and tabe-cioth'.' and
o.o fashioned Protestauss say they knew what Mt
nliis1 would lead 70.
Ibs World says that Dewitt Talmage prssides
erossleEged over the editorial columns Of bis
naTspaper. What an uncomfortable sort Of
prssi5enr~