The free citizen. (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1874-1876, 1875-11-06
THE S.ADDEST OF ALL.
Waste That would Have Driven ,,m Epi.
cure Mad.
St. Louis Republican.

N;t"tr f'haf Would Have Driven Epi-
cure Mad.
st, Louis Republican.
Once in Il while something happens in
the world, 50 far removed from the natural,
proper order of things, so thoroughly and
awiully abnormal in its quality, 50 COM
plrtcly prcpostcrous in its consequences,
that hcaveragc man can almost weep from
sheer wrath ut an cvinccd disregard of the
eternal properties. They may weep over
this statement of All actual fact:
In 1903 "a gentleman, whose name need
not be given, closed up Il profitable drug
business, anu retired upon Il deserved COM
potency. y taste for the good things of
the world had Unsuccessful business man,
and when he retired he selected from his
stock of liquors Il supply Of the best, for
private consumption. Rare Bourbon twcn-
ty years old, was carefully bestowed in bot
ties and dccantcrs; smooth, oily brandy was
similarly put aside; rich port and brown
sherry and precious cordials were pre-
served with equal care and when he final
ly went out Of business, the gentleman re-
fcrrcd to had in his possession Il rare lot
of liquors contained in 4 variety Of
bottles, dccantcrs, Jugs and other rcccp-
taclcS.
Then came sudden death, and the
business mans possessions dccendcd to
his kinsiolk The bottled liquors went
to Il near relative whose family were not
in the habit Of looking upon the wine
when red or any other color, or of con
suming liquor in any form. The bottles
and dccantcrs and jugs were put away, as
so much rubbish, in the garrct, and left
undislurbcd.
There, in the lonely garrct, the liquors
stayed, and the years passed by. The
Bourbon grew richer, the brandy oilicr,
the wines more nutty, the cordials more
like the very elixir of life. The ocean
cable became fact, Germany took a
slice of France and her milliards, Stan
ley found Livingstone, and other great
things happened, and still, by days and
weeks, and months and years, in bottles
and dccanters and jugs, hidden away,
half forgotten, in the dusty garrct, the
rich Bourbon grew richer, the oily handy
oilicr, the nutty@ wines more nutty, the
precious cordial more like the elixir of
life. Time, the great distiller was doing
his best.
Time still passes, rs time always does
and in the household where the liquors
wcre, the thrifty housewife and her assist
ant daughters kept all things neat and
orderly, and, furnished Il wcll-providcd
table. They do so still. 1t has always
been the custom Of these ladies to put up
in autumn a large supply of pickles and
preserves and jams and such delicacics,
and Il while ago they began the usual
work. They had accomplished much,
whcnat certain stage. with Il great deal
Of fruit on their hands, they found them
selves without bottles to hold the various
essences and extracts and other sloppy
'neccSSaries for the work. Some one spoke
up.
There are Il lot of old bottles and in
with nasty liquors i'll them mp in tn
garrct."
The suggestion was enough; the ukasc
was issued by the good mother, and one
w;li sent to take all the bottles and jugs
in the @arrct and prepare them for use.
They wcreall brought down and the con
tents cmpticd on the ground in the back
yard, that the vessels might he uscd for
household purposes!
The English language is very good
language for some purposes, but then,
you know, it is totally inadequate for the
purIosr just here.
The thirsty earth drank upthc precious
liquor and gave no sign, but had it lips
IL Wouid nave Snackcd them; had 1t eyes
it would have rolled them. The greedy
earth took all, the rich Bourbon the oily
brandy, the nutty wines, the exquisite
cordals! What an aroma, fit to tickle
the nostrils of gods upon Olympus, must
have arisen! What delicious agony of
cxlraation? The sweet inaudible wall of
Il lost spirit! Comprehend it if you can.
Bourbon forty-thrcc years old, other nee
tar as priceless, all cast away as common
stuff, fit not even for beasts that perish
and no earthquake, no lightning from
the sky, no convulsions of nature to pun
ish the thing. "rhinll of it, drink of it
(no, you can't drink of it, because its
gomez, dissolutc man." Was ever such
an outrage before?
This is no mere sketch from the imagin-
alton, this IS simple statement of Il hor-
riblc fact. Is its knowledge not enough
to make the man with organsof taste and
smell temporary maniac, enough to
make him want to go and dash his head
against pillar of iron? Oh, ghost ofold
Silcnus.
Newest Fashion Freaks.
La Boiteusc (thc cripplc) is the name