, 1875-02-14

Dunn could NOT withstand the pathoH Of the 81
feet, and, NTH smile, heartbreaklng in it's saG
legal lights Of the Court to defend him.
MISCELLANEOUS FEMININE ITEMS.
A dressinAkcr's apprentice speaks of her croes
eyed lover All the fellow wnoee LOCKS are cus bias
"Marry vidowerl nos II" said Matilda
Babies Sta Like tooth brushes. Eyeryhod
| wanta her own.'
The girls who tend tables st Connecticut fairs
and sell kisses a. 10 conts kiss, won't give thre
for = quarter. Stingy!
| 4 ANeYsrk chap who, on skcrt acquaptanca
| married wi low, ran away when he discovered
I that she was the mother OF twenty-five chidron
| His, Addic Lake, Of Hamilton, called It :. COW
| cumber." aud her onrased mother hit her witt
| 4Irho History Of Canada" and broke her collar
| bone.
| 4 young ladv at Dos Moines gets up befor!
[ breakfast ani takes walk OF three miles for az
etcise. willis her mother il splitting the dayl
allowance Of wood.
"Whot on earth made you get 80 drunk and
wby-oh! wky-do you eome to na IN this dread
full state p "Because. my darling, al the othel
places are shut up"
"I call that horse-car oourting," said Lock.
port glll the other evening to bashful youth
who lat sti01y by her side, NTH his hand Upon
the email Of her back.
According to careful estimate tho aggregate
value Of the dresses worn at the New York Char
isy Ball was $2 435, 267. Tha nat proceeds, for
charity" were few figures loss. :
Brooklyn woman remarked to friend few
davs ago: - don't feel very we'll this morning.
do hope TIM not going TO have spoil of sick
ness until the Beecher trial is finished! !"
John Henry wants to know what logical con-
nection tAere is between mans winding up his
out of bed and con,b.ng Ills hair with the coal
shovel.
Six Milwaukee women With babies met the
other day and agreed TO vote which naa Tho hAud-
soonest infant. Each kld got one vote, and you
ought to have seem how those women looked at
each other!
There is no seuse in married woman, whose
husband is in good health, putting chunk OF
Wedding cakn under her pillow to dream on. No
man likes TO founder around in sheet covered
with crumbs.
II swear," said gentleman to his LADY. love,
s.vou are ycrg handsome" ''Po0a!" said tho
lady. 80 you would eay If you did not thlnk so."
"Apd 90 you would think answered be,
''though should not say 3d."
A Kansas farmer purchased revolver for bis
wife and lnsiste3 on target-practice, 20 that she
could defend her house IN caae Of his absence.
After the bullet was dug ont Of bis leg, and the
COW buried, lie said he guessed she'd better shoot
with an AZ.
II is rathcz amusing that, whereas every vom-
an in Plymouth Church Ii ready to pledge her life
that Basche1 ls inuocent every woman OF them
all is quite suspicious that Airs. T,lson is guilty.
Just how they reconcile tha thing il unsnovn.-
Portland Argus,
"our Professor does wonderful things in sur
gerry" said young medical student *.he has
actually made a new lip for q bov taken from his
cheek" All, we'll !" said hiis old aunt, "mauy's
the time I haye known . pair taken from m1ne,
aid 10 very painful operation eitne1."
Kalakaua remarked to friend be.o1e .learing
Washington that the ladies' OF that city appeared
to him Every forward" One Of his attendants,
who chanced at the moment to espy At fashion,
ab!y-ureased female with an enormous hustle,
expressed the ppiniou that they seemed to hin
principally !" backward"
young married ladr died at Naples recently
and her husband desired to bury her iu lis own
vault, but her father clamed the right to bury
her III hie yaalt. on the ground that she had not
borne children to her husband. The matter mas
taken into court, and on tho first trial the hus-
band was sustained. but the father appalled, to
hlgher court and carried his point.
4 jolly doctor called on q lady On hia way home
from dinner party, So full that he could not
count her pnIse-beats. Conscious Of the cause
OF bis difficulty, he. III = moment Of irritation,
blurted out, Drunk, By Jove II and rushed out
OF the house. Tue next day tho lady sent for
him, and said that she lamented that he had
discovered her condition, and begged that ha
would keep it secret.
4 gentleman Walking behind two echool-
children on Washington eyenqe heard the boy
'' l shall be there" answered the uiss, "but
may AZ woll tell you nov that your love is hope
less. Mamq,a is determined, father il set, and
! isn't right for me- to encourage your atten-
ions. I can be q eister to vou: but nothing
moro Therefore YOU needn't buy mo any ralen- |
iuo or giye the anJ mora gum."-DelroA Free |
Press.
The other day Justice Pott Was called upon to |
marry couple on FIont street east and he WAS |
taking the bridegroom ''You promise to love- |
horish etc, when the young man blurted out:
sec here! I want fair understanding about !
his thing. Does that mean that I've got to
axe care Of her whole family. OF only hersolf2" !
lis Honor explained. apd the young man con-
lnued: "Well 60 ahead. only wanted to
nov how mach Of tue family was marrying"
-Detroa Free Press.