The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1875-04-23
An Orthomaniac Romance.


Friday afternoon last, a young man liv-
in- on Warren Avenue and a yOHng wo-
man dwelling on Thrty-second Street
were married. The wedding was a quiet
one, as the brides family was in mourn
ing OH account Of the recent death of the
brides mothers grand-aunt. and though
merrily rang not the bells still these were
wed. After dinner. the shedding of tears.
the shying of old shoes, and similar nup-
tial ceremonies had been duly performed.
the young couple proceeded 10 the modest
cottage on Warren Avenue which was to
De their demonstrations thought their
home. After tea, the two young people
were sitting in the dusky parlor testing
the carrying capacity of one chair. when.
naturally, they happened 10 remember
that az that very moment the great SPELL
ing-tournament was raging at Farwell
Hall. After saying that each would rather
be where ne. or she. was than at Farwell
Hall. etc, etc, the turtle-Coves organized
a spelling-tournament of their own, the
reward of merit being kisses and the con-
dign penalties for errors severe hugs.
Presently the newly-made bride asked the
newly-made groom 10 spell .Impenetra-
BILE" and he spelled il. .'l-m-p-e-n-e-t-r-e-
b-l-e.n 80, YOU great goose" blithely
l.
"lou, educated at a university. can't
spell 'impenetrable.' This nettled the
head of the family, and he asked her how
she spelled IL. ''i-m-p-e-n-e-t-r-i-b-l-e =
THAT the worst ever heard" said he.
for young woman who pretends to have
moved in society and gone 10 the Dearborn
Academy .'Prctends," remarked the
bride. on whose cheeks two scarlet spots
could be seen glowing in the dusk flor the
lamp had been turned down very low,
.'prctends!r she echoed a she left his knee
for rockingham. and began to rock her
self vigorously and fan herself with her
handkerchief .'my father never was a
tailor. and | cannot remember that my
mother ever took in washing Possibly
not.- retorted the husband with forced
calmness. ''but at least my father always
paid his debts. and my mothers trousseau.
if plain, was paid for" EdwiR
slept on the sofa in the pzrlor that night.
while Angelina shed bucket and half of
tears in the solitary nuptial couch that she
occupied.
AT 10 a. m. the husband and wife Of
day. pale. cold. and determined, called on
LAWYER who had known their families for
years and announced their determination
10 separate a soon as the requisite papers
could be prepared, on the ground of IL
compatibility of temper. Edwin stated
that he hoped 10 find In the Black Hill.
present distraction and speedy death. while
Angelina remarked that, though she
looked perfectly horrible in black and de-
tested wells. she would 10 nunnery 20.
The lawyer, after some difficulty. induced
them 10 tell him the cause and manner OF
their separation. Sir said Edwin. :" /
cannot live with woman that spells inn
penetrable with an t." Didyo real
ly do that, my dear?'' said the kindly old
Judge 10 the weeping wife. "Yes.- she
sobbed. THAT was wrong. that was very
wrong" he replied. $50 | told her"
stated the husband. "but she said she
could not safely trust her happiness To the
keeping OF a man who spelled il with an
'e." +" All ~ said the lawyer, THAT is
the way you spell il, is itg' at is"
"Then you are both wrong; IL should be
spelled with an "a" Swift "a a flash Of
lightning Edwin. pressing one hand to his
throbbing brow. leaped to the bookcase
and seized Webster's Unabridged. while
Angelina, whose heaving bosom BETRAYED
her emotion. turned over the pages of the
copy of Worccsfer's that the kind-hearted
old lawyer had PLACED before her. .
alt is an a." cried each simultaneously.
Edwin " Angelinaw Like
torrents from the mountain source, they
rushed into each others arms.-CAicGgo
Tribune.