The Red Cloud chief., 1875-05-20

describes "Our BOre, n creature I'D ue
found in every village and hamlet in the
world indeed. 50 truly did ic depict him
that when reading it imagined that the
bore / knew best must have Eat for the
picture. There il another character
equally Ubiquitous with the bore, and
possessing many Of his qualities, which
shall make the subject Of the present
sketch. I shall wIite of sour Liar
Everybody knows a liar. You see them
meet them, every day. Go where you
will: on the cars, in a Steamboat, in a
saloon, to q circus, a town meeting, q
public assemblage Of any kind, or any
where, and you will find "Our Liar the
center of q little coterie. lie is an ora.
tor in his way, and very eloquent. lie
attracts men like sugar does flies. You
may not believe in him; you may de
spise him ; hut you want TO hear him, and
when he is done you will pronounce him
the biggest liar you ever saw. There are
many kinds of liars. There is the pro-
found liar, who 10 generally an old man
with white hair and sober mein. lie
walks about with q cane, and daily sits
in the Post Ofice or grocery. He tells
the most marvellous stories OF what he
saw and did when a young man, and
speaks with such apparent candor and
t~ruthfulness tina. you are compelled to
saw to yourself: ~ canDOt believe his
story, but there certainly must be some
truth in it," Then there is the shallow
liar; he is the fellow with e~xprcssionless
face and big mouth; lie lives to lie; he
never deceivcs anybody, however. He
is us transparent MS a clean window pane.
He never told the truth in his life, pur-
poseiy. and you never expect him to; he
lies about the cOmmoneSt affairs OF lite.
lie has seen q great many wonderful
things that nobody else ever Jaw. 1t
was his peculiar good fortune TO see a
white squirrel with three eyes that no
other human being ever saw. He once
had in his possession a hen named
"Betty," that raised six orphan pigs, and
il he had that hen now he wouldn't take
a million dollars for her; no sir, he
wouldn't When that hen died there
wasn't a dry eye in the village where lie
lived. Owing to a similar streak OF good
luck years ago, he saw at Bucks county,
Pennsylvania, q man ut q circus swallow
a boa constructor 8 feet long. He
wouldn't Have believed it could have
bcen done ii he hadn't seen i. with his
W eyes. The other people who were
at the circus are all dead now, and the
men who performed in it are all dead
too; if any of them we're living hecould
prove it by them.
Then there is the itinerant commercial
liar. lie is keen, sharp and cunning.
You have seen him probably peddling
razor strops and paste, sir, that had won
the profound admiration of the crowned
heads of Europe. You have heard him
on a street corner vending the wonderful
and sublime corn. extractor, which is
instantaneous and pangless; took the
pr, MUM at the worlds fair against
$4,000 competitors; 81 u bottle and
recipe thrown in. Or perhaps you have
seen him trying to induce the pig-hcadei
populace TO buy the celebrated South
Sea Island pile remedy $50 cents a box.
which has been extolled to the skies by
President Grant, Peter Cooper, Bismarck,
and Pope Plus X. Secret obtained
from an aged Indian. Or you may have
heard him say to agaping crowd: Seen
tlemeD, tins is probably your last chance
to get o hottie of the wOrld-renOwned,
sublimely famous and justly celebrated
Wizard Oil, which cures all diseases
flesh is heir to. II cures piles in Is
minutes, govt in 16, cholera in Il, black
tongue in IL, spotted fever in 10, head
ache and consumption in so seconds.
For Gods sake, my Christian friends, do
not neglect your physical welfare. You
are rapidly rolling towards eternity only
81 per bottle; walk up, walk up, gentle
men, TO the great fountain of health and
drink from its exhaustless depths. Any
man failing to buy this renowned and
illustrious medicine is a murderer at
heart; only 81 per bottle, and full direc-
tions enclosed in English. German and
French" Or you have seen him in a
thousand other places Icing to the best
of his ability. There are many other
kinds too numerous to mention. The
particular liar I designed to make the
subject of this paper belonged to the
profound class. His name was Toby
Trotter; OLD Tobc he was generally
called. He was an old Virginian from
Culpepper county. a sober, quiet fell
low was old Tobe, and he did nothing
but lost around and tell big tales. He
could tell the most marvellous and I'M
probable stories l ever heard, and yet he
did it with such ~eloquencc and impress
iveness that q was half way compelled
to believe in him. The old fellows hair
was very white, his mouth was of the os
yosundxm order, and his innocent blue
eyes betokened q man of the most excel
lent vcracity. Everybody liked old
Tobe. Everybody liked to hear him