The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1875-10-07
HE COULDN'T FIND THE LIGHT

One night, during the recent troubles
in the Pennsylvania coal regions, Judge
Potts brother, Thomas Potts, was round
at a meeting of mine owners, and after
the adjournment he stepped in at tav-
ern. While there he met some friends,
and in the course of an hour or two he
became very much intoxicated. On his
way home he lost his hat, and a miner
who knew him, feeling compassion for
him, clapped on his head a miners hat,
and in order to make the dark street look
brighter he lighted the little lamp in
front of the hat. When Potts reached
his house his wife had gone to bed and
the lights were out, but Potts felt certain
that the lamp was burning in the hall,
but he couldn't for the life of him tell
where it was. He looked at the regular
hunted in every direction for the light,
but he was unable to find it, although it
seemed to shine brightly wherever he
went. Presently he happened to stand
in front of the mirror i'll the hat rack,
and then he saw precisely where the
lamp was. After a brief objurgation
upon Mrs. Potts for leaving light in
such a preposterous place, he went up
to the mirror and tried to blow it out.
He blew, and blew, but somehow the
flame burned as steadily as ever.
''That, said Potts, ''iz the MOI ex-
tror'nary lamps ever been my mizfor-
tune t. encounter"
Then he took of his coat, and holding
it in front of him, he crept cautiously
up to the mirror and tried to crush the
coat down over the light to smother it.
He made half dozen Intellectual
attempts, and then standing off and re-
garding the light, which still burned
brightly, he said:
''That's cert'nly very extor'nary ! MOI
'stonishin' circumstanz ever come un ner
my observation. Don no how t'account
for"
1t occurred to him then that perhaps
he might smash the lamp with the UNI
brella. Selling that weapon he went up
to the hat rack, and aiming terrific
blow at the light, be brought the UNI
brellas down. He missed and mashed his
Sunday hat into chaos. He took aim
again, and caught the umbrella in the
hall lamp overhead, bringing it down
with a crash. Then he tried a third
time, and plunged the umbrella into the
mirror, sma hin g it to atoms. He felt ex
ultant for moment as the light disap-
peared from his vision, but he was per-
light somewhere, he couldn't tell exactly
where. So he sat down on the stairs
and remarked
''Moz 'stonishin circumstanz ever
come un'er my obzervazlun. What in
thunder's it mean, anyhow? Lights
gone, and yet it's shinin'. Perfectly in
com pr'nsible. Wish t. grashus Miss
Potts wake Jpn explain it. Durn f I
know what I'd better do.
Then Potts took off his hat to scratch
his head, in the hope that he might
scare up an idea, and the truth broke
upon him. Gazing at the lamp for a
moment until he drank in full concep-
ton of the trouble it had caused him, he
suddenly smashed it down on the floor
in rage and extinguished it, after COW
erino two wards of CARPET with grease
Then he went to bed, and when in the
morning Mrs. Potts informed him that
some Of those awful miners had broken
into the house the night before and left
one of their hats with lamp, Potts tur-
ned over in bed so that she couldn't see
his face, and said that if the stern hand
of the law wasn't laid upon those ruffians
soon, nobody's life would be safe.