Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1875-09-24
BILL AND THE WIDOW.

goou Joke 20 get bachelor Bill Smiley TO
weekY"
You can't do IL, Ed. he won't ask herhe's
SO awful shy. Why, he came by here the
otner morning when was hanging out the
Clothes, and he looked over the fence and
spoke, but when / shook out a night-gown he
blushed like girl and went away"
81 think / can manage it, said En-; ssbut
III nave TO lie just little. But then IL
wouldn't be much harm under the circum-
stances, for know she likes him, and he
don't dislike her, but just as You say, he's SO
shy. I'll just 20 over TO his place To borrow
some bags OF him, and IL don't bag hi m be-
fore come back, don't kiss me for a week,
SO saying, Ed. started, and while he is
moving the fields we will take a look at Bill
smiley. He was rather good looking fell
low, though his hair and whiskers showed
some gray hairs, and he had got In a set OF
false teeth. Bat every one said he was a good
soul, and so he was. He had as good a hun
dred acre farmFas any in Norwich with new
mouse and everything comfortable, and IL he
wanted wife, many girl would have
grass-hopper. But Bill was so bashfuI-al-
ways was - and when Susan Sherrybottle,
Whom ne was so sweet on, though he never
said boo" TO her, Unmarried To old Watson,
e1ust drew his read in like a mud turtle
| into bis shell, and there was no getting him
out again, though il had been noticed that
| since susan had become a widow, he paid
| more attention TO his clothes, and had been
very regular in his attendance at the church
| the fair widow attended.
But here comes Ed. Wilbur.
| Good morning Mr.. Smiley"
| GOOD morning, Mr.. Wilbur; what's the
"Oh, nothing particular that know Of"
said Ed, "only Barnum's show that every
body is talking about, and everybody aud
bis girl are going to- / was over TO old Sock
riders last might, and see his son Gus has
| got new buggy, and was scrubbing up his
harness, and he's got that viii tie faced colt Of
his as slick as a seal. understand he thinks
| of taking Widow Watson to the show He's
been hanging around there a good deal of
| late, but I'd just ike To cut him out, would.
Susan Is nice little woman, AMI deserves
better man than that young pup OF a fellow
though would not blame her much eithe~
| If she takes him, for she must be dreadfully
lonesome, and then she has TO let her farm
out on shares, and ii isn't half worked. aud
| no one else seems TO have the spunk To speak
up TO her. BY lingo! if were a single man,
I'd show you trick or two"
So saying, Ed. borrowed some bags and
started around the corner of the barn. where
he had lett Bill sweeping, and put his ear TO
knot-hole and listened, knowing the bache-
Tor had a habitkof talking to himself when
anything worried him.
"Confound that young bagrider!" said BIZ,
'what business has he there. I'd like To
know? Got new buggy has he? Well so
have i, and a new harness too; and his horse
can't get sight of mine; and declare I've
half a mind to-yes, will I'll go this very
night and ash her TO go TO the show with me-.
| I'll show Ed. Wilbur that amt such a calf
as be THINKS am, If did let old Watson get
the start of me in the first placer
Ed: could scarce help laughing outright,
| but he hastily Mitchell the bags on mis-
shoulder, and with low chuckle at his sue
cess, started home to tell the news To Nellie;
| and at about five O'Clock that evening they
| saw Bill go by with his horse and buggy. on
ms way to the widows He logged along
days-and what a pretty girl Susan was then,
and wondering inwardly IL he would have
more courage now TO talk up to her-until al
/ a distance of about mile from her house. he
came 10 a bridge, he gave a tremendous
| sneeze that blew his teeth out of his mouth,
| and clear over the dashboard, and striking
on the planks they rolled over the side of the
| bridge, and dropped into four feet OF water.
Words cannot do justice TO poor Bill, or
paint the expression OF his face as he sat
| there-completely dumbfounded at hisstart-
| ling piece OF i'll luck. After a while he step
| ped out OF his buggy, and getting down on his
hands and knees, looked over into the water.
| Yes, there they were, at the bottom, with a
| crowd of little fishes rubbing their noses
| against them, and Bill wished TO goodness
| that bis nose was as close for one second
| His beautiful teeth that had cost him so
| much, and the show coming on, and no time
| 10 get another set-and the widow and young
| Sockrider. Well, he must try and get them
| somehow-and no time to be lost, for some
| one might come along and ask him what he
! was fooling around there for. He had no no.
| ton OF SpOll1ng his clothes by wading i'm with
| them on, and besides, If he did, he could not
go 10 the Widows that night, SO he took
| look up and down the road 10 see that no one
| was in sight, and then quickly undressed
| himself, laying his clothes in the buggy to
| keep them clean. Then he ran around the
bank and waded into the almost icy-cold
water, but his teeth did not chatter in his
| head-he only wished they could. Quietly
| he waded along so as not to stir the mud up
and when be got to the rightspOt, he dropped
| under the water, and came out wi tn his teeth
in his hand, and replaced them in his mouth.
But bark! What noise is that? a wagon
and dog barking with all his might, aud
his horse Is starting. "Whoa! whoa! Stop
you brute, you, stop!'' But stop he would
not, but went off at a spanking pace, with
the unfortunate bachelor after him. Bill
4 MOS a fWll In enI
but, though he strained every nerve, ne could
not touch the buggy or reach the lines that
were dragging on the ground.
| After while his plug hat shook Off the
seat, and the hind wheel went over IL, max
| ing il fiat as pancake. Bill snatched il as
he ran, and, after tanning his fist into it,
And now he saw the widows house on top of
| the hill, and what, oh what will he do? Then
his coat fell out and he slipped it on, and
| then mai king desperate squirt he clutched
the back Of the seat and scrambled In. and
| pulling the buffalo robe over his legs, stuffed
the other things beneath. Now the horse
happened to be one he got OF Squire Moore,
| and he got IL from the widow. and he took
II into his head to stop at her gate, which
busy buttoning his coat up to his chin to
think of doing much else. The widow heard
the rattling OF wheels and looked out and
seeing that II was Smiley, and that he didn't
wanted, and there she stood chatting with
her white arms on the top OF her gate, aud
| ucI ldSc DONdru Willie the c0llls ran
| down his shirtless back clear TO his bare feet
beneath the buffalo robe, and the water from
| his hair and the dust from his hat had COM
| bined TO make some nice little streams OF
| mud that came trickling down his face.
| She asked him to come In. No. he was in
| hurry, he said. Still he did not offer to go.
He did like to ask her to pick up his refns
for him because he did not know what excuse
TO make for not doing IL himself Then he
| looked down the road behind him and saw a
| white faced horse coming, and at once sur
missed IL was that OF Gus Sockrider! he re-
solved todo or die, and hurriedly told bis err
rand. The widow would be delighted TO go,
OF course she would. But wouldn't he come
| In. No, he was in hurry, he said; be had 70
| 60 ont to Green's place.
"Oh," said the widow: "You're going to
Green's, are you? Why, I am going there
myself to get one OF the girls TO help me quilt
tomorrow. Just wait a second while get
my bonnet and shawl and III ride with you"
1 And away she skipped.
Thunder and lfghtningl, said Bill, "what
| q scrapei" and he hastily clutched his pants
| from between his feet, and was preparing Ia
| wiggle into them, when light wagon drawn
| by the white-faced horse, driven by a bow.
| who held up pair OF boots I'm one hand and
pair OF socks In the other, and Just as the
| widow reached the gate again, he said:
| "Here's your boots and socks Mr. Smiley
~ lA2