Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1875-08-04
West Randolph Handsomely
Bone

West Randolph is smart village.
Its inhabitants plume themselves on
this fact, that any day you will see
them running to the depot on the al
rival of the train, hoping to hear the
Passengers say, "this - q lively place
look at the number of teams, or
"this mu be large place from the
number Of people standing around. y
Although the people of West Ran
dolph are sharper than the inhabit-
ants of any other village in the State,
they are not all wise. They are how.
ever. taking rapid strides on the royal
road, haying recently made lively
advance, under the guidance Of a
"Professor from abroad" And this
is what he taught them. "Gentle-
men, said he, having with great diff
cnlty cot a small crowd around him.
show much am l offered for this dol
lar bill r.? Who'll bid seventy-fye
cents p Almost any fool would
One did. The Professor then sold
the seventy-fye cents for fifty cents !;
the fifty cents for quarter; the
quarter for dime the dime for five
cents, and the five cent piece f)r a
cent. "Now gentlemen,' said he,
'who will give me dollar for this
cent 2" After some taking the cent
was sold for one dollar. "My friend, "
said the Professor to the bold buyer,
handing him at the same time about
two dollars in scrip, 1.-The audacity
with which you plunge into specula
ton will make You rich man some
day. Drink my health. Now, gen
,lemen, who will give me four dollars
for this five dollar bill ? holding the
bill in plain sight. Il have here some
boxes Of soap -one cake in each box,
and I'll put the bill right in to the
box. Who'll give four dollars for tha
box and contents II The box was sold
at once, and afterwards found to con
tain five dollars, as represented
Who'll give four dollars for this one,
said he, holding up another five dol
lar bill, which he to all appearances,
put in box iC the same manner as
the previous one. "Please don't open
your boxes, gentlemen, until the sale
is finished. A buyer was immediate
ly sound who handed up his tour dol
lars, and received the box. Another
five dollar bill was readily disposed Of
on the same terms, and then the Pro-
fessor held up a ten dollar bill saying,
who'll give eight dollars for this
one ?" A fish bit. Then another ten
dollar bill was swallowed in a twlnkl-
ing. A twenty dollar bill was held up
"Will anybody give me fifteen dol
lars for this one q OF course some
one said they would and did. Gentle
men, l have finished. Permit me to
advise you. however, not to open your
boxes until You get home. You will
probably be disappointed when you
find one dollar bills only, in your box
es, but my conscience is clear, as |
have done in each case exactly as |
represented. | am rcund educating
the children. Should any Jews come
this way hoping, to take you in, your
eye teeth will be cut, aud you can
keep ont of their clutches. Don't let
your angry passions rise. Farewell.
The Professor stroled about the vii
lage for about fifteen minutes, and
then took the express train North,
about forty dollars better oft than
when he arrived.
The burnt child breads the fire.
One of these West Randolph men,
who bought twenty dollar bill for
fifteen dollars, seeing n scissors grind
er coming into the village, said, "lm
going home. There is another soap
man, and if I stay here he'll get my
money. | don't know how he'll do it,
but if | don't 60 home he'll get around
we sowe way."-argua