The star. (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1874-1875, 1875-03-12
GOSSIP.

u
He was one Of Coke's cunningest scholars;
He made the Pacific Mail fork
MOre'n fourth of q million dollars
And Jonn g.
Schumacher, he
/ Is the man that iU turned out to be.
Woman's rights-Kisses.
The fare thing--A horse-car ticket.
A poor relation-Telling story badly.
Wine improves with age, but kisses
don't.
Collectors know when their work is
dun.
Schenck wishes he had never. played
poker.
"Comin' through the Rye" The tax
on whisky.
1t is proposed to reduce the size of
eggs during hard times.
Brigham Young has sufficiently recov-
cred 70 sit up and get married occasion
ally.
Anul country editor wants to know If
ICochin-China fowls will lay porcelain
eggs.
1t costs SIS to buy handkerchief large
enough for Mary Mapes Dodge to blow
her nose with.
Seneca says: "Not to return one good
office for another is inhuman." Grant
thinks the same.
Twelve thousand five hundred dollars,
eh7 Now what pretty girl and ami
able woman that Ann Eliza is.
| The boy who asked what the (y Yell OF
house was, has concluded that it 10 the
cry raised when the house catches fire.
| An advertiser called for a small boy in
want of a place and the same night
found a baby In basket on his door
step.
| A decided case of "chem-i-1oon" lacy
The dealer who advertises his shirts and
chemises as ''male and female envel'
ops"
| A Michigan man has raised five lemons
on a tree in a hot-house. 1t took four
tons OF coal and he sold the lemons for
twenty cents.
| In riding on the ''raip' always take q
seat just in front Of a tat old gentleman,
In case Of collision, he breaks the hurt
wonderfully.
A Washington housekeeper advertises
for butler. We know OF one that is al
Ileisure now, and has reputation fol
keeping spoons.
Miss May Read is giving readings out
West. Her business manager is thai
lwell-known and popular Individual, "He
who runs May Read"
A notorious horse-thief, named Bill
Buckit, was lynched in Nevada last
Thursday. Twas the last drop in the
Buckit that cost him his life.
/ The cruelty society ought to do some
thing with market W omen who carry live
chickens by the heels SO as to give them
a rush OF squawking to the head.
| 81 mean businessP said West-End
boy, as he shook an old red cent under
another boys nose; "bwo ter one that
| Mrs. MoultOn knows what's she's talk
| ing bout"
| The Legislature of Texas proposes to
declare it a penal offense for one to walk
on O. railway track. What's the use, the
companies already visit it with capital
punishment!
The weather is rough on the night po
l liceman. His ears nearly freeze whllt
he waits for the Sergeant to get out O
sight, before he can dodge into the near
est grocery.
George Alfred Townsend says, re-
| gretfully, of William Cullen Bryant;
"He has frightfully good memory, and
if you tell him lie he will catch you In
about a second"
"Gol," said Mr.. Jacob Granger, after
reading out his sons school book about
Hercules and the Augean stables. "Gol
how Pd like to hire such Teller to hau
manure for me one winter"
1t is rather amusing that, whereas ev
cry woman in Plymouth Church is ready
to pledge her life that Beecner Is limo.
cent, every one OF them iS quite suspi
eious that Mrs. Tllton is guilty.
A young woman in the West End, who
has an imitation seal-skin cloak, Is
forced to tell an average of fifteen lies
per day to make folks believe it is real
seal.
Married Congressman stand the ex.
hausting night sessions best. 1t isn'l
the first time they've listened to wither
ing speeches long after night her sable
pail has thrown o'er natures still con.
vexity.
.She is perfect Amazon" said pu-
nil in one Of our schools, of his teacher
to companion. "Yes," said the other
who was better versed In geography thar
history, 81 noticed she mad an awful big
mouth"
| Arkansas family has lived four days
on dried apples and snow. A down
lEmter with such chances would have
lcrawled out from under the drifts will
leleven patents for making dried apple
lice-cream.
A Vermont farmer stroked his gray
locks and sadly remarked: ~ didn'
really know how old and teeble l wa,
until went to lick James this morning
He's only seventeen, but could not make
him holler.b
An exchange defines blunderbuss al
kissing the wrong girl; just as though il
were possible to be wrong in kissing any
girl. A blunderbuss is for girls to kiss
one another, as they often do for want o
a man to kiss them.
A Milwaukee paper tells touching
tale of Leavenworth woman who gave
birth to four healthy babes, while tn,
husband stood in the next room, slate il
hand, mournfully chalking them down o.
fast as they were reported.
Youths and maidens complain of th,
limited facilities the ordinary hymn
book offers for scribbling during preach
ling, and now it is suggested that al
right.minded deacons will supply slate
backs, with pencil attachments.
Deacon Stiles was Millerite, but h
failed to convince his wife. On winte
} night he awokeher exclaiming: ssArlse
wifei | hear the chariot wheels of God.'
; "Lie still, you old fool" said the prae
tical wife. "The Lord wouldn't b.
around here Oh wheels with such goot
sleighing."
| The other day postmaster, on enter
ing his Office, had his olfactory nerve
disagreeably assailed. On questioning
boy in the office as to the cause the face
tious youth replied-"I don't know, sir
but perhaps the smell comes from som
of the dead lettersp
| A~.o n;ol;nsn,, hoe onnoJ,,1 ad pof =