The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1875-05-28
Pith and Point.
A FLORAL swell-The dandelion.

A FLORAL swell-The dandelion.
Music by handle-A street organ. /,
The less men think, the more they
talk.
The only suits that last longer than
you want them TO are lawsuit
Wedding suits were new
er cheaper.
In the bright lexicon of feminine
fashion there is such word as faille.
BAsHFULNEss is often like the plating
on spOons-when it wears off it shows
the brass.
A PHILADELPHIA paper speaks of ga
glazier 1900 feet long" A glazier of
that sort would set pane in a skyligbt.
GAS SOON as life was extinct cut him
down, explained Kansas woman to the
coroners jury who sat on her dead hus-
band.
WHEN the good Lord teels ennul, he
opens the windows of heaven and takes
look out upon the Partisan boulevards.
-Heine.
A GENTLEMAN observing the sign of
ment, remarked that it would be "as-
lOek without the G.
The model husband of the period is
the man who will hold the baby for a
couple of hours every night while his
wife catches up with the trial.
PHILADELPHIA brags of having the
most cleanly servant-girls. They always
hire out with the understanding that the
mistress is to do the dirty work.
"WHERE are you going?" asked
little boy of another, who had slipped
and fallen down on the pavement. $50
ing to get up, was the blunt reply.
ARTISTS have adopted many emblems
of charity. We wonder none of them
ever thought of piece of india-rubber,
which gives more than any other sub
stance.
IT is said that nothing will cure
poets affection for his idol sooner than
to catch her at the dinner table excavat-
ing the kernel OF hickory nut with
hair-pin.
A MEMBER of the North Carolina Leg
islature, in discussing bill, asked: "Mr.
Speaker, are we men or jackasses"
Several North Carolina papers are unable
to take sides.
An assessor asked woman how many
chickens she had, and, doubling her
word, proceeded to count them. She
took him to the beehive, kicked it over,
and invited him to count the bees.
WHEN a conductor ON q Syracuse car
shouted "Ruggles street !" the other
night, a man who had been doing in the
corner started up and said; "Ruggles'
treat Where's Ruggles9 Show me
Ruggles, quick ~
A PARIS correspondent states that
French wsman considers it privilege, q
bit of good fortune, to get husband,
even when he amounts to very little.
She is almost willing beforehand to sup
port him wholly or in part for the sake
of being madame.
If married men will attend the spell
ing matches, they had better leave their
wives at home. 1t isn't comfortable to
walk home with her and the dear crea-
ture muttering at every step, "Pm
ashamed of your Ignorance" and eff
you can't spell 'agitate,' I'll teach You
when 1 get you home" No; it's dis
heartening.
AT Pompeii they recently found a
curious record. II was scratched on the
stucco of kitchen wall, and has been
thus translated: Lighted the fire.
cooked his meals, and swept his house
for him 5000 times to this day, and he
refuses to take me to the circus" Be
meath this, in a different hand, is written:
"Women are never satisfied"
This is the way the people who live on
the coast of Maine describe their weather:
Dirty days hath September
April, June, and November:
Tar a. NJ.