The star. (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1874-1875, 1875-01-02
GOSSIP.

But redder, Dy far, is the CluD-mans nose
Red is the sun, as you may suppose,
When down to the misty horizon 1t goes,
Red is the peOny in spring time that blows;
Red is the sumaeh that shines through the
SHOWS:
Red is the sherry in the sunlight that grows;
Red is the ruby that sparkles and glows 1,,t
And many things red, as everyone knows,
Are sung of In rhyme and talked of in prose;
But richer, and redder, and ripper than those
Is the beautiful, blossomy Club-man's nose.
Query.-How manys children did the
smother OF pearp' have? .
Why is side-saddla like four-quart
jug? Because it holds gallon,
Pie is the bane OF American civiliza-
ton, and chick en-pie it's hen-bane,
Most people are like eggs-too full of
themselves TO hold anything else. -,
The boy who found nothing in his
stocking told his mother to darn it.
Now is the Lime TO get out your sleigh,
yarnish it up, and sell it to somebody.
"We all owe something to our coun-
try" said the Briton who went abroad
without paying bis income tax.
'She has magnificent voice for fog
WHISTLE" is the ungallant criticism of
new candidate tor vocal honors.
A gentleman who has been struck by
young lady's beauty has determined to
follow the injunction, and "kiss the rod
that smote him."
A father at Dubuque makes his child
rem address him as follows, for instance:
"Most respected and revered father, pll
take another tater."
An urchin being rebuked tor wearing
out his stockings at his toes, replied
that it couldn't be helped; s'toes wiggl ed
and heels didn't"
The new grotesque toy is pair of an
tiquated lovers seated on q Sofa; when
wound up they kiss, moving their lips
and rolling their eyes in most .ludicrous
ecta sy.
A Mormon female seminary was re-
cepl.Iy started in Salt Lake City, which
/ succeeded very well until the male prin-
cipal eloped with ana married the whole
| school.
Sentative natures do not always con-
knocked on the head recently for asking
customer il he 'didn't want his ears
washed this time"
A widow, being cautioned by her min
lister about flirting, said that she knew
it was wrong for maidens and wives to
flirt, but the Bible was her authority. 1t
said "widow's mite"
The other day a Binghampton girl of.
fered to let countryman kiss her tor
five cents. II gad," exclaimed the bu.
collie youth, "thaps darn cheap if fel.
low ndu only lne money"
| A New Hampshire woman points with
pride to twenty-eight-year r-oldstove; ;but
she don't tell how many successive hus.
bands have been used up in the annual
Iendeavor or to tit the pipe to it.
Il A professor, reproving youth for the
exercise of his fists, said, "We fight
with our heads here" The youth con.
sidered, and replied that buttine
wasn't considered fair at his school.
i A young lady, seeking situation, was
interested in an advertisement for some
one to do light housekeeping. So she
wrote to the advertiser, asking where
n the lighthouse was, and ii there was
any way Of getting on shore on Sun
days.
the ice on Lake Monana, the other day,
where the water was only four feet
deep. When he was hauled out ahG laid
upon the Ice, he family whispered
"Boys, didn't care for myself, but am
engaged"
An inquiry of Chinaman at a station
on the Pacific Railroad as to why a
countrywoman was crying elected this
reply: "Chinaman have tlee wifey. He
no ikee SO much, and he sell one for five
bundled dolce. SabeT'
j There's nothing that will try. mans
|
Many soul that sets out tor the better
land loses all self-cOntrol, and goes to
pieces tor want OF the proper apparatus
TO extricate a bit OF apple-core from his
molar interstices.
Being told that the price of an Italian
landscape he admired was five hundred
dollars, farmer expressed his aston
ishment, and asked the artist If that sort
OF paint twas partiklarly dear; for"
said he, SPve painted all my front pail
ings tor five dollars"
| The following advertisement appeared
in recent London paper: "TO Christ
ians-A pious young man, never having
/ the blessing of the use of his limbs,
through being set on wet grass in child.
| hood, earnestly solicits forty-swo post.
age stamps, in return tor which he will
send free, six best nickel silver tea
lspoons to any part of London"
Two natives OF the Emerald Isle were
travelling along road, and in conse
Il quence of the warmth of the weather
were much exhausted. When sixteen
reach, they saw q milestone to that ef
feet. ''Come, cheer up, Pat" we've
only eight m lies each togo!n said one.
i "Suppose l should quiz you about
i your bald head you wouldn't get mad
would youW said young fop to an in
digent old man, in q railway depot. 'sNt
not at all: l should only just say, that
when my head gets as soft as yOurn,
kin raise ha'r tew sell or somethin' O
that sort" smilingly replied the oil
man. .-.@.4
A family has in it a little girl abou
four years old and little boy about six
They had been cautioned in their strife
about hens eggs not to take away th'
nest-egg; but one morning the little gir
! reached the nest irst, seized an egg
: and started for the house. Her disaI
pointed brother followed, crying, "Moth
erl mother! Suzy she's been and got tn
: egg the old hen measures by"
: An eight-hour man, on going home tn
other evening for his supper, found hi
, wife sitting in her best clothes on th
: front doorstep reading a volume of tray
D els. elbow is this W he exclaimed
"Where is my supper" I" 'sI don't know,
| replied his Wife. 81 began to get you
breakfast at six O'Clock this mornlns
Tand my eight hours ended at Q p. NJ"
THE following are the officers of Ds
mon Lodge, X, of p, elected to serv
, Tor the present term: Chancellor Con
! mander, DR.. j. L. Cilley: Vice Chance
: lor, Edward Sinclair; Prelate, TIC. Kidt