The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1875-11-23

Is reached Dy treaulng gently on CAT
Did you ever know a country, tewn
that hadn't the best brass band in the
State .z,-.......-., .-.s-----.s
The editor who said his mouth never
uttered a lie,. probably spoke through
his nose. ySg sEea s5fs l' noiGg
Tailor measuring fatcustomer, .W ould
you hold the end, sir, wsssis / 60
around!
The most effective way for boy to
learn bee sces--by just putting his fin
ger into the hive rl,.
A modern essayist defines gossip to
be the putting of two and two together
and making five of them"
"Qnils are things that are sometimes
taken from the piiions of one goose to
spread the opinions of another"
Why are ideas received while fox hun
ting like handbi!Is because they are
Impressions taken in the chase. 'I'
A popular writer, speaking OF the
ocean telegraph, wonders whether the
news transmitted through the salt water
will belfresh. d, aai aa ydr - lr,
Gathering autumn leaves was former
| ly a fashionable amusement, but since
the irraptfon of the piuch-back dress
the gathering has been confined to boys.
A retired schoolmaster excuses his
| passion for aneling by saying that, from
constant habit he never feels quite him
self unless he's handling the rod 'tr Of
"A New Jersey female institute con,
tains thirty-four- red-headed girls, and
the principal dispenses with gas and all
other artificial light.-Norristo,oa Her.
dld' ia <if'j
"What is that dog barking at" asked
fop. whose boo's were more polished
than his ideas. "Why," sail bystan
der, The sees another puppy in your
boots
"The prisoner at the bar seems te
have very smooth face" said specta
tor to the jailor "Yes," replied the
jailor; she was ironed just before b,
was brought in" - rs sqHH a.s'Ff' s'riFf
Harmless Amusement MIR. Muckle
stone, latter missing his bird for the
twentieth time): 1 say, Gaskins, l d.
believe the birds are frightened at me
Old Keeper (b!andly): They didn'
ought 70 be sir!
II the Ark had been manned by (:
Mississippi steamboat captain, he would
have been very uahappy during the en-
tire voyage, because there was no op.
position Ark on the river to race with
NorristoUn Herald.
"Tirere's letter in the CANDLE" is thu
title of new song. It's pretty pro
duction, but yet We can't help thinking
thatif the letter stays there long it.
going to get scorched 80 that no one
can read it.-Fulton Times -
A gentleman was examining an un
brella and commenting upon its fnt
quality. "Yes," said person present
l''he fancies everything he sees" .'And,
added aithird party, sis inclined to seizt
everything he fancies.''
| The Rsv. Mr. Kalloch, Of California
formerly of Massachusetts thinks there
is no more sin g ing to a theatre thar
going to a church festival, but lha
young men should not go to either
when their washing bills are unpaid, :
Indian corn in North Germany offer
assumes place among the household
plants It is regarded there as tropical
In our country it becomes tropical only
under the name Of Bourbon, and theI
it warns am snlup 80 that be feels as9f
he were under the tfopic of Capricorn
/! The story is told of New Bedfort
4 Clergyman, now dead, who was asked
by an Irishman to marry him., "Why
Pat said the. Clergyman, swhat did yol
come to me for? Why didn't you g
to the Catholic priestY r 1--WE been t
| him, yer honor" said Pat, land he tolt
me to go to the devil, and I've come
4 Wiggles says that the only claim Josl
/ Billings has To distinction is "hiz baht
spelling,'' and he adds: sand eye cal
! spell wurs than hee cvur daird tri tu.--
\ Emmy, mann thaght doant no hou to spe
4 theigh cigh wurs weigh thann 't-h.a,
haz noe'rite to klame tn bee thee wurc
speluriihn theaz vouneyetedd Steightz.
| Says the Burlington Hawkeye:-
| Briefly stated, our financial views ar
| these: Tiebacls are better than green
backs. They are in greater demand
they are more constantly in circulation
they are always boyant, dreadfully boy
ant; they are always good tpr their iaee
and are always quoted above Par, 0
mar either. " : .'' '.''',7s'
/, The original "Uncle SAM was San
!, Wilson, Of Troy, New York, who use
: to brand his fish barrels, in filling arm
contracts in 1912, ~. S." to stand, u
he said, for Uncle Sam, his sobriquet-
The site of the old packing house is sti
i remembered and a. nephew Of Uncl
Sam, Joseph A. Wilson, has just reno,
!, ed to New0uiyPort, Massachusetts,, al
ter along life in Troy 5't'2- 2si2
Gold is valued at STAG per cubic incl
At this rate cubic foot of the rreciou
: metal will be worth about S252, ,2SS =
. The entire quantity OF gold now know
to be in existence is valued atabout 3
00G' millions of dollars; so that if
were welded into ore mass it could b
contained in cube the size of ,whic
Would not measure over % feet. -
I An unknown man about thirty veal
7 old Is in the practice Of loadng aroun
: the dental offices on Woodward avena,
! and whenever he sees victim about
90 up stairs he c0nfronts him and asks
= Got the toothache 2" "Yes-Ou! bl;
zes! yes!" is the reply. "And you al
! going TO have it pulled ?" ayes,
guess SO" "rhat's right, you'll thin
the whole top Of your head is comm
off when he pulls! It's awful to ha,
a tooth jerked! / wouldn't have or
e pulled for thousand dollars; but the
t lii you are bent on it 60 ahead FL s,
e you when you come out, and in case ,
II any accident II go for doctor" An
:, the tonthache goes right away then, an
= the victim goes right home.-D Detro
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