Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1875-06-03
Our Liar.

/
pieces, very faithfully and humorousl,
!. describes "Our Bore" a creature to b,
found in every village and hamlet in tn,
world; indeed. SO truly did he depict hin
, that when reading 1t imagined that tn,
bore l knew best must have sat for tn,
picture. There is another character equal
ly ubiquitous with the bore, and possess
ing many of his qualities. which 1 shall
make the subject OF the present sketch.
shall write OF ''Our Liar" Everybody
knows liar. You see them, meet them
every day. Go where you will Oh the
cars, in steamboat, in IA saloon. to a cir.
Gus. town meeting, public assemblage
OF any kind, or anywhere, and you will
find Our Liar the centre of little cote.
rie. lie is an orator in his way, and very
eloquent. lie attracts men like flies. You
may not believe in him; you may despise
him; but you want to hear him, and when
he Is done you will pronounce him the
greatest liar you ever saw. There are
many kinds of liars. There is the profound
liar, who is generally an old man with
white hair and sober mien. He walks
about with care, aud daily sits in the
Post-otiice or grocery. He tells the most
marvellous stories OF what he saw and did
when young man. and speaks with such
apparent candor aud truthfulness that you
are compelled to say to yourself: Il can
not believe his story, but there certainly
must be some truth in it,, Then there is
the shallow liar; he is the fellow with ex-
pressionless face and big mouth; he lives
To lie; he never deceives anybody, how
| ever. He is as transparent As a clean win
dow pane. lie never told the truth in his
HE. purposely, and you never expect him
/ 10; he lies about the commonest affairs OF
| me. lie has seen great many wonderful
! things that nobody else ever saw. Ii was
| MS peculiar good fortune to see Ii white
! squirrel with three eyes that no other hu-
man being ever saw. He once had in his
/ possession a hen named Betty" That
raised six orphan pigs, and il he had her
now he wouldn't take million dollars for
her; no sir, he wouldn't. When that hen
uied there wasn't dry eye in that village
where he lived. Owing to a similar streak
oI good lack years ago, he saw at Bucks
county, Penn, man at circus swallow
ooa constructor feet long. He wouldn't
nave believed il could have been done if
he hadn't seen 1t with his own eyes. The
Other people who weIe at the circus are
all dead now, aud the men who performed
III II are all dead now too; il any of them
were llNing he could prove it bv them
linen there IS the initerant commercial
iiar' lie Is Keen. sharp, and cunning. You
nave seen him pr"bably-peddln razor
straps and paste, sir, that had won The
distinguished admiration Of the crowned
heads OF Europe. You have heard him on
street-corner vending the wonderful and
sublime corn-extractor, which i, nstanta-
heous ana painless; took the premium al
the worlds iair against % 900 competitors;
o. Dottie and recipe thrown in. Or per
hap> you have seen him try to induce the
headed m. htt.. ,l,... Ia
south Sea Island pile remedy go cent, a
box which ha, been cXtoled to the ,kir,
ny President Grant, Peter Cooper, Ri,
marck, and Pope Plus IN. Secret obtained
from an aged Indian. Or. YOU NAV have
heird Nun say 10 gaping crowd: Cen
tleiheh' thle Is probably your last chance
10 get bottle OF the world-rcuoN ned, suh-
limeiy-iamous. and justly celebrated Wiz
afd on. which cures piles in IL minutes.
soul III 10, cholera in Il. black tongue in
II snoued fever in 10, headache and cou-
ph,slca "eliate. You are rapidly roInng
ao"aiuS eternity only 81 per bottle. vail
uP' VAIN up, gentlemen, TO the great G,nn-
80 "''i'n ana drink from its exhaust.
rano,iopi pi's. any man failing 20 buy thi,
fehoWhei and illustrious mediciu -
mnldere at heart; only 81 prr hn,ti, I q I
iuIl diredions inclosed in Enoli.h c ",,'
an, ana french. Or you have seen hin, in
ef hi, abity. 0 - '"e OeSt
i"etc re many other kind, too uum.r-
"' " 'ehlloh. The PARTICULAR liar
make the subject of this paner
peionseuo the profound class. Uis ,,-,rI',
was loo!Irotter; Old lobe he nj. 1',.,,
eraIiy cded. He was an old yir,,i7,i.',,
IIo'' 'uepPer County. A sober nni,'r
,e,.om , W. old lobe, and he did uott,juy
ou. ioai round and tell big tales. lie
eV'u 'oiue most marvellous and imprnh. |
, .oI sto,s ever heard, and yet he diJ i,
~ %N. s"'' eioquence and mpres sivenes,
IN haIi,"ay compelled to believe
,,.hi," oiu fellows hair was very
"h'c' hI-louth was OF the os ,otyn,5,,,, :
otuer' anus innocent blue ewes be,nk,n. /
ed man the most excelIcnt - ;
E'erSOod liked old Tobe. Evar,hn,i,.
,iNeu , 70 hr him talk. Tobe was not !, o
o"'c' ne rs not always iorcino vnu ., b
,ieai one ms stories. He ALWAYS w,itaI t
W. h!cciahce To slip in yarn. II ,ou j
Sittl III grocery aud happened to u
~ 'alhiihOout dogs. lobe would ,nI @
TIL, story '' te'l y
uehUen. once owned lht. host D
'iial e ived. That dog had passed !, u
from ms ID hearted world to :, h.,,aI Il
noPe' pc, tear from his eve I vi.h 7.
the @oobtd had spared that do6 to ma al
aS Il cont IN my old age. Grnrlenn, cl
u. "as 'uter, regular ratter,-a Scotch -
,eiiler ,,d iDfted from Dundee. Lord. gen. &C
.'ne", al sense that dog had. ami ho 81
s'ied now Just what his mission in .r a'
pro,.i, "I.N's' lie seemed to know that ", VI
,,a put mn here to kill rats. Gen. al
ona In. H. =" mat dog kill 1,257 rats in ii
one nou III was pitiful sight to Saa III
N ba hn
IL was cpleely undermined win, baias tn
anu stOndl him at 4 hole on one sid m'
anu we toanother place and nuncbed stf
.he,ii up el, tle rats began to nour on, ne
anu anu he Red hundred; and then ,ha,. Jaf
eo'nihehc cein'g too thick for him anJ ma
ne eauShiIi.e inhis mouth. and oot nna
uiuer eaaoot, AID then wish M, ho the
uanlhed ga, ie didntback up and stict hiS scr
,.i,i IAN ln'o hole o stop them until he pas
M h'ieo WI he had after he killed those des
and u ~, ",lrahce We. he opened the hole ho'
hir ,her , come a9in, but every little M an.
bn a ,ne. slid get TO fast for him. and gay
did ~, hu,ack .; up an stop the hole. He Ilel
rats pn 1.-Two titis and killed 2.4s7l-2 an zee
,. s rooellow. te strain on his mind all
was 100 mn for hig he died ney, 'nia,' da" vae
OF apopleX' eu next day and
Alter bead fnishj. soma on, ~ soi'
ask about e half of rat and he wou,u ag
say: "Oh. can,r Il, - anu ne would way
know the can Ju explain it, but | Ora
some way ifveragins' - occurred dee
If any onelsuld sp,k of ,r.ro,;u wer
er night, Tol vas reS with tbis s,a at theI
''Gentlems. once,ade , anu ais
team and -, wasriving q six-horse cost
ton Jhad sulorse weighed a the
BRIDGE ahoutro ong, open. rickety Quir
IeeQlVh and uo,r-, | cath
mard'y mar, pear aodred punds the bridge NAV
, was Just It., tWaehes irrower than I NV men
~aTSn q" nsh s1' ossn ire to at os y
Nv waoon.r gu st could make it. ed a
nnar,er xid vss dy an inch and we
10 nlay on. MI you ee l hadn't much the
as si.ch nSht IS very dark-dark IN
conld NOT lgger'-so dark that l side
ahead Of me. ell. Ilroxa 70 tl ,h lnches , mas
whipped my D intoa vallon ~ 'ns bridge ,%a uu.
ed it as ardigs an rr.o,r ~, ama cross tne
l felt little sr." '"' 'u' u course nies n;'ts
HyOu werA ing ,hont s,o,. nlsn
would tell It'd o'' s'out men he near