Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1875-03-26
FraetIannI CurreneX.

An untarnished name can be preserved
by daily securing your door-plate.
Don't imagine yourself better than your
fellows; there are no reserved seats in
heaven.
Don't make great noise in the world.
\ train is not moved by the sound of the
whistle.
Possibly we are seven thousand miles
nearer the sun than formerly; but in this
vicinity there is no weather to show for it.
A firt is fool who delights in fooling
fools and the fool who is fooled by such a
fool is the foolishest kind of fool.
More happy by far is the man with catarrh,
Than The one who is perfectly well;
be Is one of thnse who are saved by the nose
From many horrid smell.
The average length of farmers life is
sixty-fve years, while that of a printer ia
thirty-three, hence the necessity of paying
for your paper promptly.
A minister, preaching the funeral sermon
OF famous skater, said he had "gons
where there is no ice" That was capable
OF very serious Interpretation.
"If there is anything on earth that beats
four aces it is kind and amiablc WIFE,"
The author of this truism wore an elongated
scrap Of court-plaster on his left cheek, and
when we inquired what occasioned it he
gave us significant look and replied. at
wasn't four aces"
A subscriber to paper died a few days
ago, leaving four years subscription unpaid.
The editor appeared at the grave when the
lid was being screwed down the last time
and put in the coffin palm leaf fan, n
linen coat and thermometer articles
which are only used in warm climates.
dry goods clerk in an Iowa city lately
dropped senscless behind the counter while
waiting ofGcustomefs The female GUS
toner for whom hehad pulled down every
bolt OF calico on the shelves, quietly re-
questcd the pfoprietor,to remove the incum-
brance and send on fresh clerk.
An observant usher in one OF the theatres
has got no lie can tell a mans business by
the way he asks for a programme. A real
estate man wants description of the
play" hotel proprietor "the bill of fare, >
politician run of the play" an editor
"the points of the plot" and lawyer al.
ways asks: "Will you be good enough to
hand me a bill of particulars"
A Napoleon girl advertises herself as fol
lows in the Enquirer:
A young lady, lovely as a poets dream
: with wooing eyes and exquisite form, pos
sessing an intellect OF superior order, desires
to commune with some congeninl spiritl
( through the medium of the pen. Address
| PRIDE OF THE MAUMEE, Box 81, Ma
poleon, Ohio. s
: Nothing on earth can smile but human
being. Gems may flash reflected light, but
what is n diamond fash compared with NJ
eye-lash? \ face that cannot smile il
like bud that cannot blossom and dries
!. upon the stock. Laughter is day, aud So
briefly is night, und smile is the twilight
that hovers gently between both, and more
: bewitching than either.
D In the matter of tall Iowa editers: Elliot
: Frazer, of the Morning Sun "st4nds six
feet six inches high, weighs 80 pounds
and can lick salt of the head Of any mar
+ in Iowa. ~ Burlington Hawkec. "Mikt
Davis, of Des Moincs, stands six feet oigh
in his stocking feet."-Des Moincs Register
"Sanborn OF the Manchester Free Press standl
seven feet FIVE and three-fourths inches il
his shirt-tail'; weighs eighty pounds; is Sc
thin that the Lords Prayer, inscribed on
three cent piece, can lie read through hi
body by the light Of a tallow candle, Will
the greatest 'ease.-Dubugue Herald.
That is nothing. We have a man il
Port Clinton that knocks the last nameC
editor into cooked hat on thinnesS,-Ot
tara Nels.