The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1875-05-06
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

- "This is not gain, as the spider SAID When
he caught the fly.
People by whom you never wish to be cut
dead-the doctors.
- When a man can't find anything to do,
he has lived long enough.
A Spanish proverb says "a kiss without
mustache is like an egg without salt"
- Those who rise to eminence suddenly are
very apt to come back by the next train.
- "They fired two shots at him." wrote an
Irish reporter "the first shot killed him, but
the second shot was not fatal"
1t has been said that every man endeavors
with his utmost care to hide his poverty from
others and his idleness from himself.
"A man who loved brandy very much
found it had two very bad qualities: "Put wa
ter with it, and you spoil it; do not put water
with it, and it will spoil you"
- Juries are placed at disadvantage when
locked up. They could come to an understan-
ding and agree much quicker IT allowed to 90
who take interest in the cases to be considered.
= An East Tennessee contemporary. estl-
mates that 100000 dogs will be killed in the
State, their owners declining to pay the tax
under the new law. Yet there are people who
persist in declaring that it wasn't righteous
enactment.
A Milwaukee chap kissed his girl about
forty times right along, and when he stopped
the tears came into her eyes and she said IN
sad tone of voice "Ah John I'fear you have
ceased to love me-" "No l haven't" replied
John, "but must breathe"
- A model lover thus writes to his idol:
GAS could not see your sweet old face, look
into your sweet old eyes, kiss your sweet old
lips, and gaze upon your sweet old form, l.
went out and enjoyed some stout and mutton"
Is there any poetry in that man?
- A young man in Illinois complains of the
disadvantage under which he is doing his
courting. He says he usually meets the object
of his affection on the neutral ground OF the
parlor, with the old lady in one corner, the old
gentleman in another, and big dog under the
melodeon.
- "Stay," he said his right arm around her
waist and her face expectantly turned to him,
"shal! it be the kiss pathetic, sympathetic,
graphic, photographic, Oriental, intellectual,
paroxysmal quick and dismal slow and unc.
tuous, long and tedious, devotional, or what ?'
She said perhaps that would be the better way
- woman in an Ohio pententiary recent
ly received letter from her husband, which
the warden who had held the office for many
years, says it is the first instance on record OF
female prisoner receiving letter from her
husband, although the male prisoners continu-
ally receive letters from their female friends
and relatives.
- Mr.. Sullivant, the Ford county (IH.)
"Corn King" has one hundred plows running
already He intends to plant ten thousand
acres in corn, and has rented nine ehousand
acres more to be planted in corn. he will put
twenty-five hundred acres in flax, one thousand
acres in oats, and expects to cut eight thousand
tons of hay.
- John Harper, senior member of the great
printing and publishing firm of Harper Broth
ers, who has been i'll for some time from the
effects of stroke of paralysis, died at his resi-
dence in New York on Friday last, aged seven
weight Of the four brothers composing the
firm only one survives, which is Fletcher Har-
per, the youngest
- At Pompeii they recently found curious
kitchen wall, and has been thus slated: :
Lighted the fire. cooked his meals, and swept
his house for him twenty eight thousand times,
to this day, and he refuses to take me to the
circus" Beneath this, in different hand, Is
written: "Women are never satisfied
- Mrs. E. L. Irwin, of Hannibal, Mo-, high
ly respectable young widow, tied clothes line
around herself and little girl, only six years
old, fastened the other end to a stake i'll the
ground, and taking the child in her arms, she
deliberately walked into the creek, and both
were drowned. Financial embarrassment and
disappointment in love is the cause of this
tragic occurrence.
A few evenings since, Thompson was
boring supper party with a most intermlnable
yarn, when one OF the company broke IN WIN,
cpl tell you what, Thompson, whoever told
you that story did not tell you the whole of II"
"Certainly he did" said the astonished Thomp-
son II know every word Of it," "Must be
some mistake, Thompson" persisted his friend;
che never could have told you the end of it."
= At recent spelling match in Columbia,
Tenn, for the benefit of one of the churches
there, the teacher premeditatedly brought on
personal difficulty between clerk in q grocery
store and the word rhapsody" No sooner
was the unoffending word thrown at the young
man than, with the widest confidence in his
ability to knock both Worcester and Webster
into the middle of next week at single blow,
he hurled it back, manged, mutilated and
bleeding, thus: "W-r-a-p, wrap, SO, so, wrap
so, d-a, wrapsoda."
- Speaking of the tragic death of the late
Mrs. Margaret Bingham, murdered in East
Boston, Zions Herald says: "a clergyman
relates to us singular incident which came
directly to his knowledge. The night before
her death she told Ole of her friends she had
suffered from a terrible dream which she conld
not throw off, She dreamed that she was MUIR
dered She remarked that she was not afraid
to die, but was terribly shocked at the idea of
such a form of DEATH How singular, at times,
these mysterious mental pictures of coming
events cast their shadows upon us! Or was
Divine whisper preparing the soul for the hour
of extreme dsciplineW
A MOVE IN THE RIGHT DIRECTIoN-We
understand that many of the farmers of An
derson County have combined to make their
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