The Cincinnati daily star. [volume] ([Cincinnati, Ohio]) 1875-1880, 1875-11-18
An Alarm Clock.
The Alta tells this stery about a
ssalarm" that meant business:

The Alta tells this stery about an
''alarm" that meant business:
A gentleman living in West San Fran
cisco went to Gilroy yesterday morning
by the $3.50 train. He had been accus-
toned to rise about that time, and lest
he should not wake by half-past six
having no confidence in the Chinese do
mestic and still less III the probability of
his wife's waking him in time, though
she insisted she would-he thought best
to procure an alarm clock, and an instru-
ment wnich.turned out to be what it pur-
ported was borrowed for the occasion
from a neighbor.
"Thaps business" said the West
ender, with much satisfaction, "One can
retire at peace with the world and all
the rest OF mankind, and sleep like top
till Zipl and away she goes at the right
time"
"Ohl yes, / suppose you feel better,
but you can't set it. You'll have to de-
pend ON me after all"
'!A woman's good auxiliary In her
place, Sal, but you just wait" And the
gentleman adjusted the clock for what
lie supposed would be six O'Clock, and
went down town, whistling ''Pm of by
the morAing train"
ssThe glorious king of dayn was just
beginning to rejoice In the east Sunday
morning, when that clock began TO go of
at the head of the bed. 1t was out oil
order, or had not been set right. lis
effect upon the unaccustomed en-: of per-
sons just aroused from deep sleep and
| the visions of the night must have been
| as when "a thousand ghosts shrek. at
once on the hollow wind" There Is
dispute which walked first, but the wife
contests her claim with copiOus contra.
diction, and is supported by the solitary
circumstance that the policeman heard
her voice first. This. to the female MIND,
is conclusive corroboration that she was
awake when the clock started, and there
foe the clock was unneces-
sary. which is the main point she
desires to establish; and yet she blames
the clock for causing her to open the
window and cry sire" twenty times. 1t
was this appalling clamor which at
tracted the alert ear Of the policeman.
He knew the mouse and the people.
"Aye, e,aye. .nsaid he,and off he flew TO The
nearest alarm station, opened the box, ,
| and began to turn for dear Life, when the
woman's voice arose higher, "Murderl
| thieves! policeW etc. Thinking that
something fearful was going on, the OIL
cer GER leit The box and returned to the
house. A hysterical woman was pre-
| cipitating pillows and pictures out OF
the window, and asking him where the
fire was, and he would have got pro-
lane at that, il it hadn't been a woman,
| and Sunday morning. A puzzled-look-
| inv man popped out his pate, and asked
| the policeman what the row was.
"Thars what l want to know,
guess,n said the officer. ,"Whats the
row yourself? l heard you folks carry.
ing on like all possessed, slngln' out IRE,
ana bloody murder. and 1 don't know
what. And now what's the matter, says
you; what have you got In therep
All this time there came from the In.
terror h9rrid hum like forty death gur-
gles, The officer felt it his duty to de-
mand further satisfaction, but Mrs. Len.
dem, neighbor, put her head oppor-
| tunely out, and said,
"Hi! there, l know what it is. Lps
a tifteen-minute alarm clock. heard
| it. There 1t goes-zab, zab, zi, zi, zerg
Them folks amt used to it. That's all
| Your husband will have slathers Of time.
| Mrs. Earlyenough," she said.
"Sold again." said the philosophical
gentleman, as he let down the sash sud
denly, just missing his wife's fingers.
The Department began laundering te
the locality. SIT ain't nothing" SAID
the officer, ''except queer woman who
thinks the fire alarm telegraph is in
tended to call people up in time TO catcf
trains"
| Notwithstanding that waking at "earl,
cock-crowlng," the gentleman got OF Il
Gilroy by q scratch, and when he re
turns tomorrow, he will lind it rumoret
that he attempted to murder his wife
rand fed to avoid custody. M0ral-d
| NOT fnnI with alarm otOaks.