The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1875-12-16
now THE BOYS PLAYED IRON "eEA VICE"

| lruthfully speaking, George is an exceedingly
nice young man; moral, industrious and temper
ate, either constiutionally and on general princi-
PIES or fror steadast desire to appear different
from the general run of young men. George
snores and picks his teeth at a hotel in Canton,
and few evenings since, after the regular even
ing meal had been sufficiently attacked two of his
fellow boarders, whom we shall introduce as Jim
and John, because 1t suits better than Tom and
Dick, asked George to 60 out with them for
while but George didn't care about going. 1t was
too cold; felt better as he was and In short didn't
want to go. The other two argued where's the
good OF sitting by hot stove all evening-get out
stir about and brace up with the fresh air finally
George grew decided and said, ~ won't, yoN
fellows only want to get me out where no good
will come Of the nmble, and to remain quite
certain that shall go IN bed sober, shall stay
where am" Then J. and J. went their way and
left him with his hands before his face, breaking
Off the radiations from red hot stove. Some
time atterwRrd George climbed the stair aud re.
tired to dream Of ten cupola furnaces for melting
surplu negroes to the consistency of axle grease,
and gave no further thought to his two friends
AT rather late hour the two returned TO the
hotel, and while sitting IN the Office warming uO,
they agreed TO put up a joke on George, and after
few quiet and hasty words John started up
stairs, and going direct to the door of Georges
room, he raped, but no answer save a snorc
reached his ears then he raped again, then
kicked and ratified the knob, and flnallya voice
half smothered responded: 'WhoOureg
It's me, John; come to the door quick, must
have your help. ''
What's 'er (yawn) matter and George, shiver.
ing and gaping, opened the door partly.
Jim's down stairs, lying In the middle of the
floor, dead drunk, by gum come and help me
carry him up.
Carry him up yourself cant you yum-awp.
Getting cc.cOld, amt IL? u|
Hang the cold; he's heavy, and I've carried
him from clear down town and cant lug him a
loot further. Finally George was prevailed upon
and slipping into his unmentionables, he went
bare footed down the iron plated stairs shivering
like leaf When they reached the office there
lay Jim in the dim light, on the floor looking like
total wreck, and the two went up to him care.
fully, and as George stopped over his head he
suddenly stopped and asked John
Has he p-p-pu-puked YETI
No. said John, why do you want to know?
No difditferenCe why; just you take this end
| I'll take his feet.
Jim seemed perfectly oblivious, timber as rag,
and an occasional maudlin snore escaped his
lips, but they picked him up and as noiselessly as
they could, carried him up the cold stairs, which
seemed like icy needles to Georges feet. and
| when they had him at the door of his room, Jim
made sudden spring, landed square on his feet,
put his thumb to his nose wagged his fingers and
said "BahW then he rushed into his room before
| George could get at his throat and the last he
heard, as he rolled in fit of laughter was: I'D
SIS smart-d-d foOo ools." Then George slipped
off to bed and dreamed of finfernal machines and
masked batteries.