The weekly democratic statesman. [volume] (Austin, Tex.) 1871-1883, 1875-07-01

responsibility of the press of Texas could
be infinitely promoted by an approved SIS
ISOLATION OF the newspaper men of Texas.
1t is excellent as far as it goes.
Sixty bushels per acre and seventy-fv
cents per bushel tells of the profits of oat
| culture about San Antonio In fact. this
| luxuriance Vegetation accounts for the
rye-oat-ous life of the Herald man. His
wry faces made at the recorder should not,
| however. be aseribed to his addictedness to
Old Rye.
The Dallas Herald says sagely. and with
astonishing nainrte, that angels visits are
few and far between. They don't have
much business about Dallas anyhow, we
reckon. Fallen angels might tumble down
there like Vulcan upon Lemnos, who broke
his leg; but we don't see how the other sort
would ever be drawn to the place.
Sam Smith, Of Rusk, was killed nv
tree falling on him while he was blowing
Diogenes was killed by an eagle which
dropped a terrapin on old DIS head, think
ing it q big, flat, bald stone. 1t was the
stone, instead of the terrapin, that was
cracked, but that lantern which Dogenes
toted around by day, hunting for an honest
man, has never gone ont.
The Dallas authorities are going to sup
press the hooting. shouting rabble of hotel
drummers who brighten people from the de-
pot there as they do in Austin. We sup
pose it is the same fellows here. The Her
aid describes them just as we see them when
a train comes. The crazy msn consigned
to the dungeon last week owes his insanity
to the bowling devils.
Judge Thurmond, of Dallas, saved a
boys life by imminent danger To mis- own.
The boy was in front of and was snatched
away from a raging locomotive. Our
Judge does nobler deeds every day.
He saves from three TO fonr people by
snatching them from the Travis county
Jail and transmitting them to Ward, Dewey
& Co.
The doctors in Denison are putting in
bids for the pauper practice. Down here
doctors have great competition, too, in get
ting rid of their stock of charity. They
all rush for the charity fellows, and just
love to spend sleepless nights and learned
Latin prescriptions on the poor devils who
wouldn't pay if they could. Denison doc
tors are not at all singular in this sublimated
goodness.
A pretty stream of clear, pure water runs
at the base of the hill on which, nine miles
west of Columbus, Gail Borden resides.
The village hard by is called Bordensville.
In 4 secluded valley is the condensed hash
and beef factory, and this man Borden was
the inventor of condensed milk. In this
he is lucky. If it had been hash house
skinned milk he would have been hanged.
Policemen of San Antonio spend sultry
summer afternoons lounglng lazily on the
sunny side of shaded streets, shocking off
their shoes and counting fleas that fit flip
, PANTY among their toes and beneath their
trousers, while odious odoriferous ours
breed them by the peck, and diffuse them
everywhere. In another year people OF
Texas towns won't know whether to kill
the dogs or police.
The Gonzales Inquirer is delighted with
: the wonders of creation while contemplate
ing the luck of chicken that was shelled
out in Gonzales with five toes, instead of
four, on each foot. We sympathize in the
pleasure evinced by our excellent neigh
Dor and modestly suggest that this chicken
be employed, instead of the present incum,
bent, to do the scratching on the local
pages Of the Inquire.
Seguin is now spoken of in most dolorous
accents by weary travellers who look out on
it in melancholy and leave it with sigh.
S 1t is in the struggles of slow dissolution.
But the country about Seguin is as charm
ing as the town is sombre and somnolent.
; The Guadalupe, in which Seguin contem-
plates its melancholy face, is said to be,
next after the San Marcos, the most beauti-
full stream IN Texas.
, The Kaufman lottery distributed prizes as
follows last Thursday, the list including
alt sums of 500 and above: 25, 104, All
795, 343 900, 1856, O32, III, 254, 235, 004,
234, 511, 1913, 751, ga, 234 and 1884, 17s,
drew 800 each; 465, 0I0 and 237, 362 drew
$500 each; 1913, 795 drew $1,000; "A, 566
drew $4,000; sO,795 drew $4,000; 1914, 637
drew $4,000; %, 392 drew $4,000; 3S2, $50
drew $4,000; 279, $50 drew $1,000, and
/ 1T, 494 drew $25, 600.
t More than ten eventful years have passed
since the Southern army west of the Mis-
sissippi river surrendered or was disbanded,
and yet no effort has been made to perpet-
r uate the history of the part Texas took in
5 our great civil war. Can 1t be that the sol
' diers themselves are indifferent on the sub
ject, or has it ever occurred to then
t that in the ages that are TO come, pos
terity is in fair way to know nothing OF
+ the war history of Texas.
+ They have hooking bird with large
family in Dallas shade tree. This birC
8 has an uDutterable aversion we say unit
{ terable because if otherwise the bird would
' not ''sing it Quite dogs. 1t never suffers
dog to pass that it does not assail thu
q brute, and cowardly ours have already
learned to avoid the home of the brave
! chorister of Dallas groves. Our mayor
may be induced to hire that bird. SHE
would be worth eighty dollars per month
the cost of policeman, to Austin, and the
: two city governments should at once inau
gurate correspondence on the subject.
The Denison Nees tells of man whC
!, id his stupid old mare, and hoped thu
lightning might strike her. The prayer Oh
= imprecation was answered few days after
and lightning shaft shivered her timbers
She was killed. As an instance of answer
to prayer it is not so good as the disap
e pearance of grasshoppers in Missouri, where
: the pious Governor threatened to have {
2 general prayer meeting by proclamation,
i and the grasshoppers all left at once fol
e Omaha. 1t is not very hard joke on
s Providence, but il was devilish rough on the
old mare. E~F4s 1855
e A first-rate fiddler went to Lockhart and
D sawed cat-gut around the place to the inf
q mite delight of people who had never heard
, anything sweeter than the harshly discord-
i ant Neacs Echo, one of Johnny's organs o.
r course the people were in ecstacies.
school for fddlers was started, Sisson coulC
: not supply the demand for cremonas anC
4 the little negroes about Lockhart have
nearly all danced their legs off. But on,
!, morning LUckhart woke up to fiud thu
Z great fiddler gone. The everlasting fuss il
4 town and saving and see-sawing in anC
out of ''Sisson, in stores and parlors and
dining rooms, and in Offices and back alleys,
had maddened the master of the school o.
. fine arts. He fed the demoniac place
: Every fellow is getting very tired of every
T other fellows fiddle, and if the everlasting
fuss isn't stopped, there will be some livell
: fights in Lockhart. Our correspondent
adds, ''the tom cats have all left the place.