The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-03-19
The Rival Babies.

Uncle Luther Beecher's grand CO.
operative baby-show, which was to have
been one of the features of the poultry
and dog exposition at Young Mems Hall,
is not visible to the naked eye as yet, but
it came very near making a start on Sat
urday afternoon. Two women with
babies entered the parlor set aside for
the little popsey -wopseys, and taking
seats on opposite sides of the room, pro-
ceeded to stare at each other coldly and
suspiciously. One was a tall female with
auburn hair, and the other was a little
lump of woman with very black eyes
and determined look. Although they
were alone In the room, neither spoke,
but they commenced to unpack their
offspring. The auburn-haired lady finally
produced from the midst of innumerable
wrappings a pale, scrawny-looking infant,
wearing considerable gold chain and an
expression of settled melancholy. The
other baby was chip of the old block,
so to speak, corpulent cherub, with
puffy cheeks and big eyes, who pro-
ceeded to suck its fat thumbs with much
composite.
The silence was becoming oppressive
when the tall woman broke it. She re-
marked with affected soicitude
'' What is the matter with your baby,
mum the poor little thing looks quite
unweI"
The little woman's black eyes snapped,
but she answered with forced composure
!" Minerva Geraldine was never sick a
day in her life, madam, and she is six
teen months and ten days old. Has your
little one been aiEng long 2"
The tall woman's hair began to raise
up, but she pretended to be looking to
see where the pin was pricking her sad
faced babe, and made no reply. Present
~ she wound the infants gold chain
around her finger in an abstracted man
ner, so that the other woman would see it.
The rival mother produced coral
1essly clasped it about Minerva Geral-
dimes neck.
Then the other, In tones of alarm, ex-
claimed, ''Why, Alphonso, have you
lost your little gold ring2" Alphonso,
who was about thirteen months old,
vouchsafed no reply, but only looked
sad, and his mother, after brief search,
produced the ring from needle-case,
and, with glance of triumph, forced it
on his finger.
The little woman was pale, but COM
pressed her lips with stern determination.
Reaching down into her basket she
brought out silver mug and a wax doll
with real hair. She trembled with excite
meut, for she had shown her full hand.
She won ; the silver mug settled it.
Did you intend to put that over
grown monstrosity on exhibition here?''
inquired the fry-headed female, glaring
wildly at her rival.
sWhy don't you hire out your living
skeleton to side-show?" screamed the
little woman, her eyes swapping with
rage.
ssWoman I"
ssCreature !"
It looked as if there might be blood
she'd, and humane reporter, who had
overheard the wrangle, rushed in to
interfere.
els my little darling monstrosity 3''
&c Is my Alphonso living skeleton r.
Both interrogations rang out stimuli
taneously with a shrillness that drowned
the yelping of the CANNES, and the crow
ing of the prize roosters in the next
apartment,
/" Ladies" said he, with an expression
ed great solcitude, they are both
| angels. But for heavens sake do not
detain me, for I have just been exposed
to the scarlet few"
And each exasperated female clutched
up her baby and nursing bottle and
| basket and bounced out. He was alone.
Detroit Post