River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1875-06-25
ODDS AND ENDS.

~ h4Iat iSrpeCt uOen BlsnOp resemble
a hshl Both live In the seel
A new kind of metal--printers' link.
Those who use it will find it has the ring
of true coin.
To Archbishop Whately is ascribed this
paradox "The larger the income the har
der 1t is 10 live within it,
The Mollychunkemunk is the euphoni.
GUS title OF new pleasure steamer recently
launched on q lake in Maine.
darkey called at 0wensboro', Ky, the
other day, and wanted TO know, 'Does dis
postoriis keep stamped antelopes %
"What shame that | should be starry
| ing r exclaimed poor oorset-maker ont
OF work-"I that have stayed the stomachs
of hundreds"
The following legend is inscribed on the
front door of butcher shop in an inland
town Of Pennsylvania "Kash pade for lit
tel HALVES nut mourn two daze old"
SIT will come," said candidate for
Mayer of ST Louis the other day, while maxi
ing stump speech, "iust as sure as II was
that Romeo founded Rome"
Graham bread is said to be excellent food
for children on account of its superior
e.giving qualities. You can feed
child on that bread until he is all bones.
Alloy who is not strong enough to spade
up small onion bed between now and the
Fourth of July, will dig over a ten acre lot
before breakfast looking for pait.
"Time softens all things,n except the
young man who parts his hair in the mid
die, and whistles in the street cars. Moth
ing can make hir any softer than he is.
The Rochester Democrat says that Mile.
Plaster, young French actress is coming
over next season. We presume all the
young fellows will be inclined TO court plas-
ter.
Mrs. John Palmer, wife of a Steuben-
vile printer, has given birth to FIVE chill
dren inside of sixteen morths--which is
pretty hard run Oh Johns "small cap"
case.
A Lady who gazed approvingly at the
nearly finished dome OF the court house
remarked to friend: "Won't II be splendid
when they set new justice Of the peace
mp there -
II Mr.. Gardener Of Ohio hadn't been taken
out and tarred and feathered and rolled in
the snow, he never would have known how
his wife loved him. She was three weeks
scraping the tar off
II you want to see a man struggle to do
several things at once, Just watch him try ing
TO put IN his overcoat and rubbers with
his head bowed down while the minister
pronouncing the benediction.
young man in music shop was lately
overpoweref by fastidious young lady.
who wanted to purchase "Mr. hoods
song of thea geneleman's undergar-
meat The young man is still alive.
Upon the death Of her husband the LADY
married his brother, and when friend saw
the portrait of the first husband in the house,
he said" Is this a member of your fam.
tyf" ut Is my poor brother.in.law, !" she
said.
Did it ever occur to you what the meaning
OF mo cards." and ''No cake" appended
TO marriage announcement meansi II Is
simply the exclamation of the editor thrown
IN, In spiteful way, TO show that he was not
remembered.
During a trial the Judge called witness.
No one answered, an elderly man rose aud
solemnlY said, "He is gone" "Where has
he gonef' asked the Judge, in no tender
tone. 81 don't know; but he is dead" was
he guarded answer.
Holmes remarks ON the wonderful pro-
visions OF nature. He says there Is not
even left narrow crevice under fiat re TX
without thin black bug prepared by Prov
idenee to fill it. II is the sumo way when
vacancies occur in official positions.
A man In Paris recently offered to lend
money to doctors on the security Of their
diplomas. Several young doctors availed
themselves OF this offer, but the man after
ward disappeared, when 1t became evident
that he had procured the diplomas with
the intention Of selling them.