Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1875-03-08

IL have come to make confession 10
you. Miss Wyman."
Here he made long pause, to see the
effect of his words
Bells eyes grew wide with astonish-
ment; but. thinking her lover was con-
fused. and that she could help him out
of it. she replied -
"You mean that you came to hear my
confession, Mr.. Sidney"
1t was now Mr.. Sidney's turn to be-
come petri6ed with astonishment; and
while the two were looking at each other
speechless, / managed to open the slid
ing doors, and exclaimed:-
"Miss Wyman. permit me to intro
duce to you Professor Charles Sidney
Giles. inealtAy gentleman from Chicago.
who has come East in quest of a poor
wife.
Professor Giles. allow ne to present
you to Miss Bell W. Raymond. Boston
heiress, who has come into the country
to pick out some poor man for hus-
band"
Then turning to the audience, | con-
tinued -
Ladies and gentlemen These two
lovers have been engaged all summer
playing little game called. Diamond
Cut Diamond, and l fancy they have
cut each other up pretty effectually."
A grand shout from the audience
followed
20 you hateful wretch r. exclaimed
Bell. making dash at me, at the same
time trying to sieze my beard
"You barbarian" chimed in the Pro-
fessor, endeavoring to reach my throat.
But managed to evade both of them.
and dove through the door into the hall.
Then lay down on the floor and
screamed with laughter, till my sides
were sore for month. When | return
ed to the parlor Bell declared she would
never forgive me as long as she lived.
But knew if she was half as happy as
she seemed to be, she would never put
the threat in force The Professor also
protested that he would give me COM
Portable choking the next time he met
me alone. To all of which | replied
that if they would furnish the party
with an oyster supper. and invite my
wife and l to the wedding. would for
give them for boring me with their mat
| rimonial secrets On these conditions we
would be good friends again, and on no
other. The terms were 50 much more
liberal than they had any reason to ex-
/ pect, that they Immediately promised
compliance
So week after, we had grand oys-
ter supper. Bell and the Professor
cooked everything we had on the table,
and never was cooking more scientifically
performed, nor more delicious viands
ever set before company. Bell and the
Professor presided over the entertainment
and served the guests with becoming
dignity, and discretion. A happier par
ty were never gathered together. And
when produced and read Bells and
the Professors letters, we we're a merry
group indeed. My wife and have just
returned from pleasure trip to Boston.
| The children and boarders are delighted
with the wedding. cake The cards read:
Mr. AND Mrs, CHARLES s GILES
Prof Charles S. Gnes, Miss Bell W. Raymond.
Chicago. Boston.
/ And this wedding card is the legiti-
mate fruit of the Web of Dcceptions
''BEsT THISGs."-The best theology
Ia pure and -beni6cent life.
The best philosophy contented
mind
The best law-the golden rule.
The best ducation-self-kn knowledge.
The best ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
ment.
The best medicine-cheerfulne and
temperance.
The best painting smile upon
the brow of childhood.
The best science---extracting sun
shine from cloudy way.
| The best to war against ones
weakness
1 The best music-the laugh Of an in
nocent child.
| The best journalism-printing the
true and the beautiful only, on memory's
tablet.
The best teIegraphiug-fashing ray
of sunshine into the gloomy heart.
The best biography-the life that
writes charity III the largest letters.
The best mathematies-that which
doubles the most joys and divides tie
most sorrows.
The best navigation-steering clear
of the lacerating rocks-of personal con
tention.
! The best diplomacy-efecting treaty
Of peace with ones Own conscience
4 Charles Dickens said that the frst
external revelation of the dry rot jn men
/ e a tandanc.- "a Inrk and Iaunga. to he