Los Angeles daily herald., 1875-04-07
Irish Bulls and Blunders.

Doctor r. Shelton Mackenzie con-
tributes to the Saturday Night some
amusing anecdotes about our Irish
friends, as follows:
Many examples of this genius might
be adduced. One rather notable one
was where dashing young gentle
man, starting on a bridal tour, and
wishing to avoid the observ-
alton to which newly-wedded people
are subjected, spoke to his confidential
| man-servant in these words:
II am going to take you with me, to
| wait upon us and look after the bag
gage. My wife's maid is to remain at
home, because she is apt to chatter,
and we do not want people at hotels to
know that we are just married. rely
upon you, Patrick, not to say any
thing about it.
Pat promised, with great. volubility,
cheek" as he elegantly expressed it,
and the party started on the bridal
trip, remaining that evening in one of
the principal hotels of the city, which
was marked on their programme as
the DeSt stopping place.
Next morning the bridegroom did
not exactly admire the rather hostile
| looks that were cast at him from va
rious persons, while there was evident
pity and even sympathy in the man.
ner in which the young lady was re-
garded.
On paying his bill, the hotel cashier
was all but uncivil. During the jour-
ney, bridegroom and bride compared
notes, agreeing that there was some
| thing very peculiar and unaccountable
| in the manner in which they bad been
looked at and treated at the hotel.
The lady ventured to suggest that
perhaps Patrick had been indiscreet in
his conversation with the walters and
hotel servants. The gentleman thought
that could hardly be-. after the strong
injunctions he had given him to hold
his tongue.
As last, at their next stopping place,
Patrick was sent for and questioned.
"Did you notice anything extraor-
binary in the way in which We were
spoken of and treated at the hotel last
night or this mOrning?
He had not noticed it,
"Are you sure that you did not go
chattering about us /? Did I not
warn you that l did not wish it to
be known that ours was bridal
party ?" f
| To this came the clenching reply:
| "Sure, sir, held my tongue, as I
was desired. AT the servants table
last night one Of the girls of the house
said We were handsome couple, and
she dared say were only just married;
| and on that, remembering what you
told me, I up and said that she was
mighty mistaken, for ye two were
| not to be married for a fortnight to
| comep' SIi1 s!i.A G.ai1a. 8.Ii
This, which accounted for the Pc
culiar looks at the hotel, was blum
der, but not bull. 1t was as much
mistake as Handy Andy has ever
| made.
1t was neither wit nor bull, when
an Irishman, asking for letter at the
Postoffice, was asked, "What name p"
pettishly replied: ne.al lef
"Sure, you'll find it written on the
letther." vu - ssr-~s7.s E
1t was neither bull nor a blunder,
but keen wit, when person asked
about discharged servants capacity,
said: 9 ~ . = VII - = y
"She's so fond of work that she'd
like all the time to lie down and sleep,
by it" . = .''s s'~o'e e''' -
This last is far-fetched. An Irish
1 bull is correct idea incorrectly stated.
Tie thought itself, however expressed,
Is always ys'intelligible. For example,
two Irishmen, meeting after long
separation, made Inquiries after old
acquaintances. 3 va FT,asnRy SEE
"How is Tom Murphy?n was asked.
The response was:
"Mighty bad. He has been laid
up with sickness for some weeks and
is so reduced that you'd scarcely know
him. You're thin and Pm thin, but
he's thinner than both of US put to-
getherp'
Pat meant TO say the sick man was
thinner than either, but in the thought
lessness of haste, he said thinner than
both. a,tsrs @r TN 98fsa
| A thorough bull, too, is found in the
anecd0te of the Irishman who, having
picked up golden guinea in the street,
took it to money-changer, who, find
ing it under weight, gave him eight
cen instead of twenty-one shillings
for it..
| Next day, on the same street, he
saw another guinea, which he did not
pick up, but passed on, saying: r.,r i.
ZIP have nothing to do with you! I
lost three shillings by one like you,
yesterday"
| Another good specimen is Sir Boyle
Roche's declaration, in the Irish Par
Lament, that the progress of civiliza-
ton might be judged from the fact
that "little children, who can neither
walk nor talk, may be seen running
about on the streets, cursing their
Maker ~ .~o
| There are bulls of action, as we'll as
Of speech. ) In one of Hogarth's en-
cravings is a man, sitting on the out
side part of the branch of tree grow
ing over river, which he Is saving
of, apparently not aware that, when
his work is done, he must fall into the
water below.
| Still better is the anecdote of an
Irish bricklayer, who laid wager
of a pot Of porter that country man
of his, also in the building line, could
not safely convey him, seated in hod
and carried on his shoulder, to the
third story of new house. This was
done, and the man was safely deliv-
cred at the top of the honse, as agreed
upon. Throwing down a shilling, he
exclaimed: oiiq
'There! I've lost my wager; but
when we were up as high as the sec
ond story, and your foot made little
slip on the foot Of the ladder, bedad /
began to have great hopesp'-that is,
OF winning the wager, and probably
breaking his neck by fall on the
ground below.