The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1875-09-07
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Rain Upon the Root.
From the Danbury News


Thi, is the season of the year when a
man may expect to be suddenly called at
any moment Of the night to get up and
put down the windows. On the advent
of a thunder shower it is rarely that a
man wakes fret. If he should he keeps
quiet, so as not to disturb his wife, and
avails himself of the first lull to go to
sleep, again. How differently a woman
acts-oh, so differently! Just as soon
as she hears it is raining, she seems TO
lose all Judgment at once. She plants
both her feet into her husband 8 back, at
the same time clutching him by the hair,
ard shaking his head, and Historically
screams Get up! get up, quick It's
pouring down in torrents, and all the
windows are upr'
He cannot wake up under such cir
cumstances with an Immediately clear
conception of the case; in fact, it fre-
quently happens that he is way out on
the floor before his eyes are fairly open,
having but one idea really at work, and
that as to what.he is doing out of bed.
The first thing to do is to strike light,
and while he is moving around for the
matches, and swearing that some one
has broken into the house and moved
them from where he had lain them on
going to bed, which is always plausible
enough she hurls after him the follow
ing tonics; "Do hurry! Mercy, how
that rain is coming into those windows !!
We won't have carpet left if you don't
hurry up! What on earth are you do
ing all this time2 Can't find the match
esq Mercy sake, you amt going to
stumble round here looking for matches,
are you, when the wateris drowning US
out? Go without a light! What a
man you are il might have better got up
in the first place Well! (despairingly J
let the things 60 to ruin if you are a
mind to I've said all I'm going to say,
and don't care if the whole house goes
to smash. You always would have your
own way, and / s'pose you always will,
and now you can do as you please; but
don't you dare to open your mouth to
me about it when the ruins done. I've
talked anI talked and talked till I'm tired
to death, and / shan't talk any more
We never could keep anything decent,
and we never can; aud SO that's the end
of it. A very brief pause, John
Henry. are you or are you not going to
shut down those windows?Nfh 58fi
Just then he finds the matches, and
breaks the discourse by striking light.
He was bound to have that help before
he moved out of the room. He has got
the lamp lighted now. No sooner does
| its glare fill the room than he immedi
ately blows it out again for obvious rea-
sons. He had forgotten the windows
were open and the brevity of his night
shirt. 1t almost causes him to shiver
when he thinks of his narrow escape -
He moves out into the other room with
celebrity now. He knows pretty we'll the
directions to go, and when flash of
| lightning comes it shows him on the
verge of climbing over stool or across
the center table. If there is rocking
chair in the house he will strike it. A
rocking chair is much surer in its aim
than a streak of lightning. 1t never
misses, and never hits man in bat one
spot, and that is just at the base of the
shin. We have fallen against more than
eight hundred rockers of all patterns and
prices, ,and always received the first blow
in the one place. We have been with
dyi1g people, and have heard them af-
| firm, in the solemn hush of the last hour,
that a; rocking chair always hits man
on the shin first.
And when a man gets up in the dead
of night to shut down windows,he never
misses the rocking chair. 1t is the rear
end of one of the rockers which catches
him. 1t is dreadful agony. But he
rarely cries out. He knows his audience
too we'll. A woman never falls over a
rocking chair, and she will never under
stand why man does. But she can tell
whether be has,hy the way he. puts down
the windows when he finally reaches
| them. A rocking. chair window (if we
may be allowed the term can be heard
three times as far as any other.