Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1875-11-08

She took my meaning, smiled and said.
well, TIM your huekebeuy"
=----------=
Stanley writes that he wont come home
for seven long years but he will vote the
Democratic ticket all through Africa.
If it hadn't been for the pull-back
style Of dress a man in Iowa would have
married a woman with wart on one of
her knees. He saw 1t in time
A youth called at printing office the
other day. and, after watching the COM
positors set type awhile, he said to one
of them, "You use heap o four-penny
nails :"
The heaviest snorer we have heard of
is a woman living on Shaumut avenue,
whose husband woke her up the other
night during tempest, saying he wish
ed she would stop snoring, for he wanted
to hear it thunder-BoStOn Globe.
A Roman boy a swimming went where
nobody could see,
Then put his shirt on wrong side out
through some mistake of he,
Nor saw his error till he lay across his
mothers knee.
Some Pulaski boys undertook to play
base ball in field where a ram was
feeding recently. He butted the short
stop through picket fence and forced
all the rest to make a home run. The
boy who was butted through the fence
was the only one scored, and he carries
the score with him. but he cannot see
it.-Rome Sentinel.
One Of the reporters of the Nebraska
City Press was placed in tight place
for an answer the other day. He met a
man and wife and boy, all breathing
heavily amid interrupted and stifled
laughter. WhereupOn the following con-
versation ensued:
Reporter-Hello what's the matter ?
Wife-Why we've been running a race
and he beat me of course; his legs are
the longest
Reporter-Yes. he has got the advan.
tage there.
Husband-See here. hoa0 do you knoac:
A PECULIAR SENTENCE.-The follow
ing curious sentence, "Sator arepo tenet
opera rotas," is not first class Latin. but
may be freely translated IL cease from
my work the mower will wear hi;
wheels" 1t is in fact something like q
nonsense verse, but has three pecullari
ties /. 1t spells back and forward the
same. 2. Then the first letter of eael
word spells the first word. 3. Then al
the second letters of each word spells
the second word. 4. All the third, anC
so on through the fourth and fifth. TheI
commencing with the last letter of eacl
word, spelling the first word. g. 1hel
the next to the last, and so on through.
Hrs FEEL1NGs.-Last night as frisk1
colored youth was walking up Clay St.
he was accosted by a colored acquain
tance, who remarked: "Well. Brutus
dey say you is in love ?" 81 il, Uncl
Abra nj don't deny de alleged allie
CATION" "And how does you feel Bru
tus?" You have stuffed your elbow
again a post or somethin' else, hasn'
you. Uncle A bra m ~ Il reckon" IAN
you remember de feelin' dat runs u
your arm ?" IL does" well, TAX
dat feelin', add a hundred per cent mi,
it wild de incest hair oil in town. sweetel
wild honey, and den you can 'magin hoy
| feel = VickSburg Herald.
WOMEN AND THE DEVILS -Old Win
ston was a negro preacher in Virginia
and his ideas of theology and huma
nature were often very original A gen
tleman thus accosted the old gentlema
one Sunday:
Winston. understand you believ
every woman has seven devils. Hov
can you prove it?"
We'll, sab, did you never read in d
Bible how seven debbils we're cast QUITE
Mary Magalin ?"
"Oh. yes I've read that"
Did you ebber hear of 'em bein' cas-
out of any oder woman, sab p
mo. never did"
well. den all de odders got 'em yet
The instinct Of Newfoundland dogs t
save a drowning person has been some
what painfully tested by an unluek
Frenchman. He was walking in th
country with a friend who possessed
magnificent Newfoundland, and incar
tiously questioned the truth of the dog
sagaeity. The dogs master, vexed Z
the slur cast on his favorite, gave hi
friend a push and knocked him into
shallow river. Turk Immediately spran
in, and seizing one Of the tails of th
immersed mans coat. commenced
swim for land Unfortunately anothC
} Newfoundland. trotting along the otht
side Of the river, saw the affair. an
also came to the rescue. Dog numbt
two seized the other tail of the coat an
wished to swim back to his maste
, Turk held fast and struggled for b
: side, aud the owner Of the coat cried
vain for help. At last the coat gay
way. and each Newfoundland swai
proudly home with piece of cloth
his mouth. so that Turks master W;
obliged TO plunge in himself to say
his friend.