Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1875-10-13
Odds and Ends.

Odds and Ends.
A CLEBURNE (Texas) murderer. who
is to be executed the first week in Octo
Der, wants to make a farewell speech
three hours long, They'll see him
hanged first.
How much did he leaye2o said a.
lady, on learning the death of wealthy
citizen. Everything" responded the
lawyer, The did not take a cent with
him."
THIS conversation was overheard in
barber's:
Barber. "Thin out your hair bit,
sir 2"
Customer. "No, never mind. NV
vile attends to that. But just oil it
we'll"
Gov. HARTRANFT, of Pennsylvania, is
credited with doing away with the idiot.
lc custom Of hanging men on Friday
In that state. The propriety of hang
ing Pennsylyanians every day in the
week should long ago have suggested
this change.
The reader, by using this alphabet,
can obtain the whole inscription in
French. The whole alphabet was used
/, III it excepting the letters K, W, and Y.
The inscription, translated into Eng
lish, read as follows:
A SHORT time since two young ladies
were accosted by a gypsy woman, who
told them that for fifty cents she would
show them their husbands faces in
pail OF water, which being brought, they
exclaimed: eve only see our own
faces" "Well," said the old woman,
"those faces shall be your husbands
when you are married"
ONE Scotchman complained to an
other that he had got ringing in his
head. Do We ken the reason O. that2"
asked the worthy crony. "No." "Tn
tell ye-it's because it's empty" s'And
haze ye never ringing in your head ?"
quoth the other. 'No, never. s. And
do ye ken the reason 2-because it's
cracked"
"WHAT do You do for living ?" ask
ed farmer of burly beggar who ap-
piled at his door for cold victuals and
old clothes. 81 don't do nothing much,
but travel about was the answer.
Are you good at travelling 2" asked
the farmer. Eyes, replied the beggar.
"Then let's see you travel" said the
farmer.
The mistress of summer boarding
house In an interior town, finding her
self one day quite at leisure, in conse-
quence of the absence of her patrons on
an excursion, repaired to a neighbours
for chat s'I should think you'd feel
lonesome to have your boarders away
So, said her neighbor. "Wall." she
replied, CT do feel kinder lonesome.
It seem jest as it did when I was fust
widder."
A DETROIT bachelor, not rich, but In
dustrious and respectable, entered the
house OF widow on Baker street the
other day and said: s'Mrs. Blank, I'll
give you just three minutes to answer
whether you'll be my wife or not9" 81
only want fifteen seconds yes !" she
answered, and they sat down and began
to plan how many peaches they would
can this fall.
GIVE been through that wicket
Charley" 81 don't think you have,
sweetmeats. ssIndeed I have" ssNo,
you haven't" 81 did," "You didn't. !"
And then mallet sails over the fence,
and pullback witches furiously over
the green sward and disappears into
the house, and everything is as quiet
without, as though peace was the
sovereign power on earth.
A GUEST at one of the hotels in this
city found a lady's night-gown in his
room recently, and went to the clerk
with it, saying: "Look here, mister;
this is hollow mockery, delusion and
snare. If you can't fill it up / don't
want this thing in my room. "-Leaven-
aUOrth Commercial.
HYDROPHoBIA, communicated by a
pasteboard dog, is the latest medical
novelty. Two months ago mad dog
was killed In a house after having bitten
at nearly everything in the room. One
OF the things In which he buried his
teeth was little boys dog made of
pasteboard. Subsequently man used
this toy to stay the blood from cut in
his hand, and so the virus went into his
wound and he died.-NeaO York Her.
aid.
THERE don't appear to be much limit
to farm laborer's hours. A man WHO
has been working for New Canaan
farmer, putting in thirteen to sixteen
hours a day, quit on Saturday.
"What's the matter? don't you like the
place ?" asked the farmer. 90, yes, 1
like the place we'll enough" explained
the s'hand," s'but the nights are get
ting SO long TIM afraid I can't do q full
DAVIS work.. The farmer smiled like
an invalid. Dan6svy Nesvs.