The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1875-07-24
LAUGHING GAS.
Roll-call--the bakers visit.
Ours at l,ome-the baby.


A-veil-able space-a woman's face.
For music lovers-a Patti on o & risi,
plate. -
Abraham was the first sick man.
He had Hagar in~the wilderness. .,a--~.
The way for a desolate, old bachelor
to secure better quarters is to take u
better half"
Why. does n duck go under the
water7 For divers reasons. Why
does lie go ON Ass.,d 7 For sun dry rea-
sons.
The Wisconsin lapmer who left u
candle burning in the barn so as to
scare thieves awag, has TO barn to
watch now.
A little wart- backed hop toad will
break mp a croquet party quicker than
the darkest thunder cloud tl,nt ever
gathered. -,
~ wonder what makes my eyes 70
weak" said q fop to u gentleman.
" They are III weak place." res
pOnded the latter. fesa.h
A landlord having let all his houses q
but one, was asked if that unlet house
was his last. 6 Yes, last, but not
leased" was his reply.
"How odd it is," said Pat, as he
trndged along ON foot, one hot sultrY
day, that man never meets cart
going the same way he is!" 'si,.s
Ornitho-lo logic. If all birds that sing
are songsters, then all bids that roost 4,
are roosters hence all hens are ro0s-,
ters.
Th man who takes too much punch
makes Judy of himself. ''i'''''
This narrow skirt fashion makes a
yound lady look smaller by degrees
and beautifully less. t..t
Brigham says if Ann Eliza will only
come back he will not harem single
hair Of her head. n
An Enslishman was lately struck
by lightning out West, and they spoke
of him as blarsted Britislm r."
When an editor publishes libel in
Peru, he is made to eat his own words
by swallowing the paper in which it
is printed. .s5.5
Now Dio Lewis says lemonade is
not healthy. The fact is lemons are
too expensive in the vicinity Of his
boarding house. -. e4 E; i, 81
The first female lawy er,admitte.l 10
the bar Of Ohio is regarded ~ o legal
'lssslUss3 trsllyg1sssba - -.
bands house is not. Her cases went
over until next term.
Sir" said an old Judge to a young
lawyer, "you would do we'll to pluck
some of the feathers from the wings
OF Your Imagination and stick then. ii
the tail of your judgment"
A yonng man in California beeaa
to read Il paragraph abont mine to
his sweetheart, commencing: "Y6h.
mine when she interrupted him
with: 81 don't care If do, john"
The fiddler of minstrel company
ran away the other day in debt to the
manager, at which the manager face
titiously declared that he had engaged
the fellow for fiddler, but lie had
taken the part Of u base violinist.
No, gentlemen Of the jury" thur
dered an eloquent advocate the other
day in Denver Court, "tlis matter
is for his honor to decide, who sits
there sleeping so beautifully" His
honor opened both ey yes and his mouth,
and said: !: "All owing to your mar
c"tic speech, sir"
An old lady, on hearing that a young
friend had lost his place on account
OF mis'lemeanor, exclaimed: "Miss
Demeanor :? Lost his place on account
of Miss Demeanor Well, well In,
atearcd it's too true that there's allus
a woman ut the bottom Of q mans
An eccentric old fellow, who lives
alongside Ut a graveyard, was asked
it it was not an unpleasant location.
" No" said he, =" l never jined places
in my life with a set of neiglibors that
their Dwg business 10 stidGy
as they do"
A boy Who had stolen some apples
was forgiven for the rather ingenious
manner iu which lie excused himself.
The schoolmaster asked him what he
had to say for himself, tue urehin re-
piled: The apples wege Toms; I
don't know how he got them: and
he don't know how got them."
At circus, while the rope walker
was going through his performance,
boy about twelve years old turned tn
an acquaintance of the same ago and
Tom, don't you wish
you could do that I" "Yes, / do,
sadly replied Tom, "but my folks
make me 60 to school and arc deter
mined that shan't never be nohody!"
AN elderly gentleman, returning
home from church, began to extol tho
merits of the sermon to his son. Said
he: :: Jack, have heard ono Of the
most delightful sermons ever dcliv-
cred before Christmas society. It
carried me to heaven" i" Why didn't
you dodge i'll !" replied Jack "You