Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1875-12-05
ALL SORTS.

1t is a mistake to think that death
raises men to heaven-Or sends them 10
dismal abodes. Men go to good world
or a bad one before they die. Death
only touches them to wake up, and
show them what they are.
"There is a piece of soap in Albany
supposed t. be one hundred years old:
And it might lie around loose IN the
Albany legislature and not be used for
one hundred years more. one VINO
enters there leaves soap behind.
While Wales is in India, he had bet
ter set up a kingdom there on his own
hook. Queen Victoria hiss lately been
assured by gypsy that she has forty
wears vet to live, and it would be rather
tedious to Albert Edward to wait 30
long,
False friends, like insects in a summer day,
Bask in the sunshine, but avoid the shower
Uncertain visitants, they fly away
Fen when misfortunes cloud begins &c
Into LIES bitter cup true friendship drops
Balsamic sweets, to overpoWer the gan
True friends, like ivy and the wal ~ II props
Euuality-Lady Clare We're de We're
Can YOU tell me, Jane, what you mOsi
want for your wedding? Jane: Really
nv lady, 1 can't 'ardly say. 1 'ave'nt
got nothing. But you'd know best, my
| lady. Anything just what you'd want
my lady, if you was in the same posi-
| ton.
Gas to opening oysters" said old
Hurricane, "why, nothing's easier, II
you only know how" "And hoW'f
how?n inquired Straight. "Scotcf
snuff!r answered old Hurricane, very
| .ICo0tah cr,nfF. hrsnU 4
little Of it ever so near their noses and
they'll sneeze their lids off,
Mrs. Starrett, of Lawrence, Kansas
propounds the interesting query, "Whs
shall we do with our dsughters?n and
farmer in the same prOpinquity wants t.
know, "WhRt shall we do with Ou
eorn?n The able editor OF the Topek;
(Kansas) Blade, eager to make himsel
useful and popular with both parties
says, "Let us feed our!corn to our daugh
ters."
To the wife of Judge Thomas J
Gum, who resides three miles south
Smithville, Missouri, on the rOaI
leading from Smithvilie to Liberty, wa
born a boy baby on the twenty-nintl
day of September last, the mother be
ing in the seventy-seventh year Of be
age. The baby weighed eight pound
at the time of its birth, and is hearty
well-developed child.
A candidate for vacant yicarage i
England announces an inventlo
of his own which may prove to
useful. 1t is peculiar arrangement {
the pulpit, with clock to give warn
ing, When at the end of the half hou
the clock sounds an alarm, If tn
preacher does not conclude within thre
minutes, down comes the pulpit, wit
parson and the rest of the appendsges.
Recent information from Siam SPEAK
of large bands of fair-haired Chinese
calling themselves Cheen Haus, maxim
armed raids upon the northeastern
frontier, where they are establishin
themselves in force, and issuing g pape
requiring allegiance from the towns an
villages. VINO these men are there doc
, not vet seem 60 be any definite intelli
gence. The King OF Siam has take
, active measures to protect his frontier
The Detroit Free Press says: A d.
tr0it boy surprised his father the otht
day by asking: "Father, do you lik
land she likes You2' "ef course sh
, does." "Did she ever say so?n "Man
a time, my SON." "Did she marry 20
because she loved you?n "Certainl
. she did" The boy looked the ma
{ over, and after long pause, asked
"Well, was she as near-sighted then
! she is nOWw
: The ornamental vs. the useful. Be
/ ! want: 1 suppose, ma'am, l shall NJ
/ have to wait on the table? Lady: {
: no! want a housemaid. Servant:
suppose, ma'am, 1 shall not have
0 make the beds? Lady Surprised, bU
= composedly): Certainly not! Serval
n thinking the place will suit: And
j suppose, ma'am, l shall not be expecte
9 to answer the door? Lady: OF cOur
5 not! The fact is l want servant
e look at, and don't think you will d
!. A Florida bill Of sale: This Is to sui
{, ty that Jacob johnson hSs old bis wi
g Mary A. johnson to me, Daniel Ski
man, and he has given hur two chi
e dIen, the oldest and the youngest, al
= !. Daniel Skillman, has promist to tai
:, care Of her; and she has TO have OF
l. bedsted and bur clothing and matrt
= and bed clothing, and Aur things th
d belong to hur, Mary A. johnson. N
% Daniel Skillman, has bought her
II ak dollars witness, G. I. Lind, Fam
M'Leod.
70 John Arnold Lilly, an undergrsdus
20 of Clara college, Cambridge, and son
ISs q Devonshire clergyman, was broug
n before the Exeter (England) mag
- tretes on October Goth, charged W
70 stealing q nugget Of gold, a SPAN
"A coin, and other specimens from
ar Albert memorial museum. SIEVE
% witnesses were examined, and
70 prisoner then pleaded guilty. I
90 bench sentenced him 10 ak mon
10 hard labor, gnG the mayor expressed
be grey thas my eUri e., H. ,,1noaI
-. Officials.