The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1875-06-26
WIT AND WISDOM.

In what respect does Bishop resemble
a fish Both live in the see
A correspondent cf Western paper
having described the Ohio as a "sickly
stream, the editor appended the remark
That's so-it Is confined to its bed"
Graham bread is said to be excellent
food for the children on account Of its sup
erior bone giving qualities You can feed
child on that bread until he is all bones.
con which side of the platform is my
tram III asked a stranger in Jersy City
depot the other day. "Well, my friend, "
replied gentleman, prssing, IF you take
the left you II be right, if you take the right,
you'll be left"
Gratitude.-A bachelor made will leav-
ing his property to the girls who had re-
fused him; "For to them | owe all nv
earthly happiness.
''What shame that | should be star
wing !" exclaimed poor corset-maker out
Of work. that have stayed the stomachs
ofhundreds
A boy who is not strong enough to spade
up a small onion bed between now and the
Fourth of July, will dig over ten acre
lot before breakfast looking for bait
Rome Sentinel
Caruth, the Vineland IN. I'D editor,
remarks in his valedictory. 1.-TWO months
constant wrestle with bullet in our brain
has convinced us that we lack the capacity
to develop a lead mine and publish an
independent Vineland newspaper at the
same time.
''SiI said little clustering man to a
religious opponent, ''to what sect do ysu
suppose belong 2" "Wen
don't exactly know, replied his opponent.
but to Judge from your size, appearance
belonged to the class generally called in
sect y
The Following verse was once incribed
on church in Halifax, ~ s., the base
ment Of which had been uged as a wine
saloon
There's spirit above, ana SPIRIT below.
spirit Of Joy aud spirit oi woe
The spirit above is the spirit divine,
The spirit below i the spirit q wine.
When Nlcksburg negro woman was in
formed the other day BY a reporter Of the
Herald of that city that the price of sea
hons had increased fifteen per cent during
The present month, she elevated her hands
and exclaimed DE Laut only knows
what is to become Of poor folks Seems zif
de more we worked de oftener de white
folks 60 and riz de price on de nessumsar-
les of life"
At meeting Of Confederate soldiers the
other day in Atlanta. 80 many we're dubbed
uy1th titlaa thar lha FolI,u-t,,,, a,,v,v,.y.-,a4
resolution was introduced Resolved,
That the president appoint A committee of
one to inquire whether there we're any sur
viving privates Of the late war.
The latest anecdote brought TO light by
the Centennial celebration il rather anus
ing While the British troops were march
ing through old Cambridge, one of them
said jestingly TO a farmer sowing seed
''You may SOW, but We shall reap Well,
perhaps you may, was the reply, for
am sowing hemp.
''Why don't you kill off more old hens III
inquired friend Of a New Jersey farmer
The latter over the fence, and after cycling
his interrogation for awhile solsmnly re-
piled Summer boarders.
A Wicklow professor, reproving youth
for the exercise Of his fists, said, eve fight
with our heads here" The youth cOIfid-
cred, and replied that butting wasn't con-
sidered fair at his last school.
An Irishman who was engaged TO cut ice,
when handed a cross-cut saw to commence
operations with, pulled out copper, and
turning to his comrade exclaimed, 'Now
Pat fair play, head Or tail who goes be-
low p
DIR. Chalmers used q say that when one
is in the act Of tipping his hat to a lady
whom he supposes to be an acquaintance,
it requires good deal Of tact to make be-
lieve that he is only scratching his head
when he finds she is a stranger.