The New Orleans bulletin. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1874-1876, 1875-01-23
THE KING OF THE LOBBY.

SAM WARDS TEsTIM cNY BEFORE THE PAcIFl
MAIL INVESTIGATING COMMITTEE.
The following is portion of the amusin
testimony of Sam Ward, the notorious Wasf
ippton lobbyist, before the Pacific Mail IL
vesigating Committee
"This business Of lobbying, as it is called
is as precarious as fishing in the Hebrides
You get all ready, your boats go out, suddenl
there comes storm, and awayyou are driven
Everybody, who knows anything about Wash
ington, knows that ten times, aye Fifty time
more measures are lost than carried; bu
once in awhile q pleasant little windfall 70
this kind recompenses us, who are Away
toiling here, for the disappointments OF the
session. ] am not at all ashamed. 1 DO MOI
say that l am proud, but am not at al
ashamed of the occupation. 1t is very use
full one.
In England it is separate branch Of the
legal profession. There they have parliamen
tarv LAWYERS who do no other business.
There the committees sit all day to hear these
LAWYERS and they sit in Parliament all night,
whereas here committees are only allowed to
sit for an hour and half and SO it is very
hard to get through 1909 bills in session.
The disappointments are much more numer-
GUS than the successes. l have had many a
very pleasant contingent" knocked away
porous and certain, and | would not insure
any bill if were paid fifty per cent to secure
its passage. That is the general rule in this
subsidy matter | think that the gentleman
(Mr. Irwin paid more money than he need
have paid Mr.. Niblack and he distributed
it rather badly. l am satisfied with what l
got. Laughter
Mr.. Niblack-You got much less than 9th
ers got?
Witness-I do not know was retained, l
suppose, because the Kings name is a tower
OF strength Il laughter and 1 am called
I" king of the lobby ! but / am not the treas
urer of the lobby, that is certain if you were
here for entertainment could entertain you
with histories of well-concocted plans which
all disappeared just at the crack of one men,
ber's whip-perhaps matter Of caprice, per-
haps a matter OF accident, you can not tell
which we who are of the regular army know
when we were whipped [laughter]; but gen.
tlemen Of little experience come down here
and peg ON to the end Of the session and
never understand why they had better go
home [laughter] to introduce bill proper
ly to have it referred to the proper commit
tee, to see that some member in that commit
tee understands its merits, to attend to it,
to watch it, to have counsel to 60 and advo-
cate it before the committee to see that |
members of the committee do not Oversleep |
themselves Oh the mornings of important |
meetings. to watch the coming in of the bill |
in Congress day after day, week after week: to |
have your men on hand dozen times, and to
have them as often disappointed to have one
OF those storms, which spring up in the Adri-
attic Of Congress until your men are worried
and worn and tired, and until they say to
themselves that they will not go up to the
Capitol to-day, and then to have the bird sud-
denly flushed. and all your preparations
brought to naught; these are some of the
experiences OF the lobby. daughter.
Another point the question OF entertain
lnents is spoken of. There is nothing in the
world SO excellent as entertainments of a re-
fined order. Laughter Talleyrand says
that diplomacy is assisted by good dinners,
but at good dinners people do not talk
''shop," but they give people who have a
Taste in that way right, perhaps, to ask
gentleman civil question and to get a civil
answer; to get information which his clients
want, and that can properly be given. Some
times q railroad man wants information;
sometimes o patentee wants his patent re-
newed. That is pretty hard fight. Then a
broker wants to know what the Treasury is
going to do about a certain measure. Some
times banker is anxious about the financial
the tariff. All these things we do constantly,
md we do not make any charge for them
We keep up a certain circle of friends,
md once in while an opportunity comes !
Of getting something that is of real service,
md for which compensation is due and proper.
But the entertainments are proportioned to
he business of the session. :
When the business is good so are the enter |.
and when the business is not good i,
he entertainments are meager. Laughter.
IIr. Irwin told me story of King OF Spain,
Loot t1n until he,
,arty; he ordered one Of his attendants to
limb tree and see whether there was any a
building in sight; the man saw q chateau on
he top of an adjacent hill, and the King said,
Let us 90 there and they went and were
at the door of the chateau by the :
randee with his head uncovered. The !
ling announced who he was, and said the
arty wanted dinner. The family had dined
n hour before, and the servants had con-
umed everything that was left. The cook u
rs sent for, and said his Majesty would be Il
erved in an hours time. They had very =
leasant dinner and the King was rather sur u
rised at the taste displayed in some of the :: :
ishes. After dinner commencing the ex- -
ellence of the repast, he asked what it was :"
opposed Of Luckily it was not Friday. The
randee sent tor the cook who came in and !,
aid, Your Majesty, no animal has con- ~
ributed its life to your dinner, and he went Z.
, the window and showed the king ifty-two
igs with their ears all cut Off. Said the king:
A man who can make such a repast as that ~
ON the ears of titty-two pigs shall be made =
overnor of a province" Laughter q
Mr.. Niblack-Is there not good deal of ~ ~
oney wasted on good dinners? 10
Witness-I do not think money is ever -
asted on a good dinner; if a man dimes badly 9,
D forgets to say his prayers going to bed, but -
he dimes well he feels like saint. Laugh "
ri % =.
MIR. Ward gave his testimony or rather de- =; =.
vered bis humorous lecture, standing at the - =,
Id of the table, with his eyes twinkling, his "
ce beamng with good humor, and his whole
erson presenting evidence of his being not IL
My in belief, but in practice, disciple Of ~
lie gospel Of astronomy. He kept the mem u
srs of the committee and numerous audi ce
'nce in constant laughter. m
SOUTHERN SOCIETY GIRLS. III
[Chicago Tribune Washington letter. Ii