Smyrna times., 1875-06-30
How He Came to be Married.

1t may be funny, but I've done it.
Shadows departed-oyster stews, brandy |
cocktails, ogler boxes, boot jacks, abscond- |
| ing shirt buttons, whist and demijohn. |
Shadows present-hoop skirts, band boxes,
ribbons, CATERS, long stockings, Juvenile
dresses, tin trumpets, little willow chairs,
cradles, bibs, pap, sugar teats, paragoric,
hive syrup, castor oil, Godfrey'S cordial,
soothing syrup, rhubarb, sena, salts, squills,
and doctors bills. Shadows future-more
hive syrup, ETC., etc. I'll just tell you how
| got caught.
| was almost the darndest, most tea
custard bashful fellow you ever did see.
1t was kinder in my line to be taken with
the shakes every time l saw pretty girl
approaching me, and Id cross the street
any time rather than face one; it wasn't
because | didn't like the critters, for if |
was behind the fence looking through a
| knot-hole, | couldn't look at one long
enough. Well, my sister Lib gave party
one night, and stayed away from home
because was too bashful to face the music.
| hung around the house whstling sold
Dan Tucker" dancing to keep my feet
warm, watching the heads bobbing up and
down behind the window curtains, and
wishing the laundering party would break
up 50 could get into my room. smoked
up bunch of segars, and as it was getting
late and mighty uncomfortable concluded
to shin up the door post. No sooner said
than done, and ! soon put myself snug in
bed.
Now said !, let her rip! Dance till
till your wind gives outI' And cuddling
under the quilts, Morpheus grabbed me.
| was dreaming of soft she'll crabs and
stewed tripe, and was having good time,
when somebody raped at the door and
woke me up. "Rap" again. l laid low
Rap, rap!" Then heard whispering
and knew there was a whole raft of girls
outside. "Rap, rap Then Lib sings
t out
"Jack, are you in there?"
: eyes," says l.
Then came roar of laughter.
Let us in" says she.
" / wont" says |, can't you let a fellow
II alone?"
Are you a-bed?" says she.
4" / am says |.
l. "Get," up says she.
II ~ won't says l."
Then came another laugh.
n Throwing a boot against the door, fel
better. But presently, oh! mortal but
N tons | heard a STILL small voice, yer,
q much like sister Lbs and it said:
Jack, you'll have to get up, for all tn,
es girls things are there!'
N Oh, Lord what pickle Think of M
he in bed, all covered with shawls, muffs, bon
nets and cloaks, and twenty girls outsd
to hedoor waiting to get in! If had stoppe,
~ to think | should have tainted on the spot
As it was, rolled out among the bonnet
ce and ribbons in a hurry. Smash went tn
ne millinery in every direction. had to dres
re in the dark-for there was a crack in til
door, and the girls will peep-and the wa
M | fumbled around in the dark was death I
eel straw hats. The critical moment came.
opened the door, and found myself rigl
'rt among the women.
ey ooh! my Leghornr' cries one" NJ
he dear, darling winter velvet p cries anothe
and they pitched in-they pulled me til
he way and that way, boxed my ears; and OF
IN bright eyed little piece-Sal-, her nan
was-put her arms right around my nee
ca and kissed me right on my lips! Huma
/ I - Al 7
we -ss good as she sent.
nd "Jack," says she, eve are sorry to d
om turb you, but won't you see me homer
eyes says ], 81 will"
or did do it.
ars Twas at the close of glorious summer d
ON the sun was setting behind distant he
roost-and Sal and myself sat upon
antiquated back log, listening to the mus
OF of nature, such as the tree toads, roostC
and grunting pigs. The last lingering ra
ack of the settingsun, glancing from the butto
of a solitary horseman, shone through
GUS knot hole in a pig-pen, full in SAILS fa
10 dyeing her an orange peel hue, and showi
IN off my threadbare coat to bad advantage
an "Sal," says |, in voice as musical as I
ives notes of dying swan, will you have me
She turned her eyes upward, clasped
iah' by the hand, and with a sigh, she answer
s. eyes"
on WHAT WAS THE FORBIDDEN FRUIT ?-it i
cath common opinion that
1.-THE fruit
Ito OF that forbidden tree, whose mortal taste
and Brought death into the world and all our woe :"
was the apple. But there is no foundat
rsia in Scripture for the opinion. The AppI
,rine nowhere in this connection.
"apple treef is three times mentioned
the Bible-viz. Sol. Song 2: 3; and 81
was Joel II. Apples are mentioned {
ssion three times-viz. Prov 25: III Sol. S
,recy 2, 81 and I: 8.
was Some time since, in writing to miss
Iot ary in Eastern Turkey, near where
the Garden of Eden is supposed TO have
alton located, we asked if there were any