The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1875-02-25
They Couldn,t Trade.

They lOuO07t lT00ee
Keyser had lightning.rods placed upon
his barn three or four years ago; but
during the last summer the building was
struck by lightning and burned. When
he got the new barn done. a man came |
around with red wagon and wanted to
sell him a set of Bolt & Barnam' S patent
lightning.rods.
Il believe not,'' said Keyser, 81 had
rods on the barn at the time of the
81 KNOW said the agent. Il know
Won had, and very likely that was the
reason YOU we're struck. Nothin's more
likely to attract lightnin' than worthless
rods. ],
CHOW do you know they we're worth
less!' ),
"Why, was drivin' by yer in the
spr;ne. and seen them rods, and says
to myself. that barn'u be struck some |
time. but there's no use in tryin to con-
vince Mr.. Keyser; SO l didn't call.
know d it. because they had iron tips:
rod with iron tips is no better n clothes
prop to ward off lightnin.
s.The man who sold them to me said
they had platinum tips remarked Key
SER
"Ah! this is a wicked world, Mr.. Key
ser. You can't be too cautious. Some
of these yer agents lie like gas-meter.
: It's awful, sir. They are weolly untrust-
worthy. Them rods was the most rldlck-
! lus sham ever see. They want worth
the labor it took to put 'em up. They
e wa ant now, that's the honest truth.
"What kind do you offer
= "Well, sir, I've got the only genuine
-.
ed on scientific principles. Prof. Huxley
saws it's sure to run off the electric fluid
n every time. Twisted charcoal iron, glass
t insulators, eight points on each rod' war
ranted solid platinum. We give writ
ten guarantee with each rod. Never had
a house struck since we began to offer
this rod to the public. Positive fact.
S The lightnin'll play all around house
IS with one of 'em and never touch 1t. A
n thunder storm that'd tear the bowels out
a of the American continent would leave
D. your house as safe as polar bear IN the
If middle of an iceberg. Shall | run you
d one upi
" Il don't know said Keyser. mus
in ingly.
er sI'l put you up one cheap, and ther
at you'll have something reliable. Some
n thin there's no discount on.
" "You say the old rod was fraud
~ "The dcadliest fraud you ever heart
ID of. 1t hadn't an ounce Of platinum with
IN in mile of it. The man that sold
he ought to be prosecuted, and the fellow
h. that put it up without lnsulators shoul'
he be shot. It's too bad the farmer SHOULD
be gouged in this sort of way.
s'And Bolt & Burnam S rod is not
d. fraud"
he ga fraud! Why, really, my dear 81,
,is lust cast your eye over Prof. Huxley
letter and these certificates, and remen
hit Der that we give written guarantee
ne positive protection, of course.
tn sJust cast your eye over that, sal
O. Keyser, handing him piece of paper:
int s:Well, upon my word. This is 'ndee
BILE somewhat, that is to say, as It were
looks-it looks little like one Of Q,
l." own certificates.
to ssJust So said Keyser. That old re
E." was one Of Bolt & Burnams. You so
be it to my son-in-law you gave this cert
to ficate you swore the points were pla
It, mum, and your man put it up.
at "Then suppose we can't trade.
low "Well, should think not, said he
, at ser.
Whereupon the man mounted the
wagon and moved on.-MdT Adeter.