The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1875-08-12
Those CircHs Bills-An Old Lady's
Opinion of the Frauds,

ALPACA dress.
young man, don. you know that cir
cuses are awful liars and hnmbugs?' she
finally inquired.
The man at the table leaned back in his
chair, and refused to express his opinion.
well, ! know it," she continued in a
positive tone. ''and | believe they get wine
every day. Now see here-listen to this,
gorgeous panorama of astonishing aero
bate talent" that's all right on the pos
ter, but hey they got'ems I'd like to gee
one o'them animals
"You'r re laboring under mistake, madam
1t means great display of curiosi
ties, and informs the public that the propri-
| etor has secured many first class acrobats
the chaps who stand on their heads, turn
head ever heels, and cut up so many
monkeyshipes."
cit does, eh p she unused "waal, do
you believe it takes smart person to keel
ever ?"
DWELL, one has to have a good deal of
training"
They do, eh - she remarked, as she
put her umbrella in the corner and spit on
hef hands /" I'll show you are deceived.
I'm an old woman, and if ! att
MADAM, hold on--don't do itr' ex-
claimed the man behind the table.
Il know you can, madam, but don't.
am here alone, and I-Idon't ont You to,
Id rather you wouldn't. If vou are deter
mined on it | shall leave the room"
swell, YOU know l can do it, and that's
enough. You may be right about what
that means, but see here hear this; "The
high. way ahlaze with resplcndent chariots
the grandest pageant on earth" I've been
to lots OF circuses, young man, and l never
saw pageant yet. If they had one the
door of his cage wasn't open"
You are also in error there. The bill
refers to the fact that the great number of
wagons, chariots, etc, make sight worth
seeing as they pass along the street"
"um-m-m,' she muttered as she folded
the bill over; 81 don't see why they could
not have sad so then. And now see here
read that: "Sig. Govinoff, in his aerial
flights" Now, then, is that boa costric
tor or q cundurango?"
at Is man, madam-one of the per-
formers. His real name is probably Jones,
but that amt grand enough, and so thew
put him down as Sig. Govinoff. He is
the man who jumps off the rope, turns
over twice, and comes down all right"
"He is, eh? Well, if he's got an idea
that he's the smartest man alive want to
disappoint him. ] never did try to turn
over twice, but I'll do it right here now
or break my neck! Git the things off'n
that tablet
rs ay, madam-don't. wouldn't have
ron do II for fifty dollars?"
"Ju st o.oce?'
"For J. cav ems sake, madam, get down
rom this nbl s--here-here's dollar if
7ou won't do it?"
II don't wa'l ty'our monney, and won't
nv IT If Won ara 80 3 cart, but don't want
20 circus going rot nd talking about aryal
lights and deceivins the people"
ha u
weat of his brow, and presently she re-
marked
"And here's another TIN ng, right here.
"a sparkling asterisk, fash. ing across the
ield of the cloth of gold-Mon leur Come
ique in the great delineations OF human
character I'd ike to know who sac Is.
"Madam, that is mau--a man Wfo de
meats character"
'lIoH?"
"Why he makes Up faces-expres, les
mirth, srorow, joy, and so forth"
Gle does, eh? Well, what's that to i,
blow about? Makes up faces-ses
here '"
And she shut her eyes, ran her tongue
out and looked like bottom of a brass
kettle which hal been kicked in by
mule
"They are humbugs, sirf' she said as
she drew her tongue in; "aad dye
suppose Tde pay fifty cents to go to
one7"
"They are quite entertaining as a gener-
al thing"
"They are, eh' entartriniug ELI : Well,
if | can't do more entertaining in five min
utes than circus can in all day I'll leave
nv bonnet up here Here, hold on to the
chairr
Madam, I earnestly hope you are not
going to perform any tricks"
81 hain't, eh You just hold on to the
legs of this chair.
81 can't madam wouldn't do it for all
the diamonds in Syracuse Go away,
nadam-go home. I'm in an awful
hurry y
"Well, l won't then, but when / say cir
cuses are humbugs can prove it. don't
keer two cents for their big words and
their panoples, pageants, asterisks, giraffes,
arva,s, gorgeouses, and ourangoutangs-
can beat EN- all boiler myself
And she took off her spectacles, lifted her
umbrella, and went down stairs.
VARIETIES.
IF dogs tail is is cut off entirely will
! II not Interfere with his loeomot.on Z