The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1875-12-18
VARIETIES.

A headwind-a sneeZe.
Food for thought-Flsh.
Ours at home--the baby.
A deliberate body-S Glow man.
dubious weather-Whether or no.
Musical piracy-steaiing march.
Queen Of Arts-female graduates.
At dinner fowl is very good fare.
Notes of admiration--love letters.
The FIRST thing in boot is the last.
Sweetness and light-a love match.
The coming woman-Annie Versary.
A high toned young man tenor
singer.
A girl of inbred usefulness-Sally.
ratus. i" :"
Cheap drapery--the curtains of the
night.''' '' ~
Fruit for allOonists-currents in the
air.
Bellies of the kitchen -wringing-ma-
chimes. "
A farmers crib is a gnawful place
for rats
II rocks ever bled, they would bleed
quartz: "
Comfortable quarters = twenty-five
cent pieces.
Hanging is brisk, but with falling
tendency.
People who sell coal do business on
n Large SCALE"
Academy of design Z young ladies'
boarding school. " '"
Moderate thine expenses be not
idle keep thy counsel.
Speaking of the ppsfaelites, were they
not to the manna bdfh?
Why is a kiss ike a sewing machine?
Because it seems SO good.
II Ifcaptains were less reckless, there
would be less wtecks. 1"
Whiskey is alike an Internal furnace
and an internal turn.us.'' '"'
In what metre shorlq "Up in Bal
loon''be sung?r Gas metre.
Stage struck = the man who was
knocked over by an omnibus.
When under weigh, sailors can tell
whether or not thr sea is heavy.
What horn pr6d ices the most discor-
dant music? TIE drinking horn.
In what coors should babies be dres-
sed Why, in fancy co!ors, Of course.
A Boston murderer want his execu-
tion delayed, as be 10 iu poor health"
Take. care of the poor Indian and
he'lltake hair of the white man.
Men who arc used to going it pretty
fast-The Locomotive Engineers.
Tho acrobats of every household. The
pitcher and tumbler. !
When docs . man have to keep his
word When no one win take it.
1t makes a grest difference whether
glasses are used cSet' or under the nose.
"Heat gcu crates motion, Illustra.
tionLA si6ell boy sitting down ON a
hot coal. 'r' " p"
A. Western man who Bit his neigh
boris nose of was bound eyer to kehr
the niece ~ ",'N t'" -
Our devil says he likes to work after
hours, because 1t Is past time.
That wesa disastsrous FIRE at Iquiqu,
in Peru. And what d.rious name
to be sure. 49, '''' ="
The fast train teiescoped hog il
Hague street, the other day, and threw
the squeat a mile distant.
A Boston paper speaks of boy VIII,
was "SuppbsitiOhably drowned sever
years ago."
Babies are described as coupons at
taehed TO the bonds of matrimony.
All goats love tobacco but all c.ea
lures that love tobacco are not goats.
The way to meet aman OF doubtful
credit Is to take no note OF him.
Jones says he loves two charmin
glrls-Jenny Rosity and Annie Ma
tibn.
he water Is so low IN some Of tn
western rivera that the catfish have t
stand on their heads to breathe.
"sambo, did you ever see Catski
Mountains" "No, sab : but Nv
seen lem XIII mice. O."
"This," thought boy. while bein
trounced by his fond papa, ''s yer
like q whale"
Query-When Dickens wrote b
character OF Dot, did he have in min
"girl of the period ?"'
Professor "What important chang
came over burns in the latter part
hiSlife ?" Student-"He died. -"
A person looking at some skelet OF
asked a young doctor where he &,
them. He replied: "We raised them.
"They fired two shots at him, "wrot
an Irish reporter 1.-THE first shot killt
him, but the second shot was not f
tai.
A blind mendlcent wears this inscri
tion round his heck; "DOn't be ashst
ed to give only e half penny. can
see, - =" va
''Cold streaks playing tag down II
back" is the way Htrle Ypsilanl
Mich, girl describes the approach
an ague chill. ''''
''My son, put away that ball. /