Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1875-07-30
BOHEMIAN, MONTANA TERRITORY, FRIDAY JULY Co. 1875.


Doesticks.
in letter to the chicago Inter Oceal
|reylving the life of Mortimer Thompson
(Doesticks), ELI Perkins'' tells this story
I'm 1862 Doesticks and Artemas Ware
were in Washington. ARENAS was ther
writing his Baldinsvllle articles. Or
pheus G. Kerr was writing bis hospita
papers. Charles s. Halpine was writing
his Miles O'Reilley war criticisms, and
Petroleum Y. Nssby was writing his in
i,nitable four corners dialect satires. Eacl
was at the meridian of his glory excep
poor Doesticks, who was passing behine
the cloud which finally obsoured him.
ARENAS had one practical joke which
he delighted to perpetrate on every occa
sion, and which have forgotten 10 use If
my recent Biography of the genial show
man. That joke was to rush up behind
some old fellow, clap him on the back
grasp him by the hand, and greet him
with the most cordial ''How are you,
George!!" and then apologize to the sur
prised man by saying he took him for an
old friend, George Munson.
Well, one night in 1869 it was my for
tune to go into Hammock's oil saloon,
opposite the Treasury Department, IN
Washington, with Doesticks and ARENAS.
In the back end of the saloon, up five or
six stairs, sat an old Maryland farmer
Just the kind of an honest, unsuspecting
locking old fellow as ARENAS always liked
to strike for his recognition joke. Doe
sticks Jaw the old farmer. and, telling
me to stay in the front part of the saloon
with ARENAS, outof sight of the old man,
he went back to the farmer and perpe.
trated ARENAS old joke Oh him. Rushing
up to the old countryman, slapping him
on the back and grasping him by the
hand he sung out:
"How are you, George, old fellow--glad
TO see you-haven't seen you in an age
how're you been! how's the farm? how.
"You have the advantage of me. stran
ger, +" interrupted the man in surprise.
20! beg pardon, SIR" exclaimed Doe
sticks. in the humblest manner, II beg
ten thousand pardons. sir. l took you fol
my old friend, George Munson, but"
.sAll right. sir--mistakes will happen
we're all liable to mistakes" says the
stranger, and then Docstlcks came back
and joined Us, while the old farmer went
on eating. ARENAS was too busy to no
tee what Doesticks had done. and as @
K. PLilander came back he sauntercd up
to ARENAS and said:
81 say, ARENAS, d'you see that old
farmer over lhere?'
'.What. the old man eating pumpkin
PIE with his knifc?"
.'Yes, - said Doesticks, bowling.
"Well, he's good man to come your
recognition joke on; try it, Ar.emas"
'.All right, Mort" says ARENAS. You
fellows STAN here an I'll show you fun.
I'll puzzle that Of farmer till lie don''
know pum'kin pie from tripe."
Then ARENAS walked up the steps to
ware him. As he got alongside Of the old
farmer he gave lurch and grasped his
hand violently with a.
''How are you, George! God bless your
old bald head. How's Harah'n the chill
dren? How's-"
Nov, look here!" shouted the farmer,
as he tipped over the table in his effort to
get up quick, that's twice you've blum
dered round here. Now, you git" and
he caught poor ARENAS by the coat collar
and shook his fist in his face.
II beg pardon, III, !" stammercd ARENAS
Il took you for my old friend George
Num-
'Yes, an that's twice you've took M
for your old friend George Munson, yor
stupid idiot, you! D'you take me for q
d. foo-do you? Oh! I could lick The
eyes out of you- you-you 60" and
the old farmer swayed his big fist in tht
air, but Artemas slid down and out and
came back to Doestieks all out Of breath.
II tried it, Mort" pulled ARENAS, be
tween his breath, ''Eut-the-darned-old
fool got mad. He didn't-know enough
to take-the joke-and-"
why. Charley, you ought to hav.
known better" eaiG Doesticks, ''when
had just come that came joke on the ole
man myself. You can't 'spect = man t.
stand that joke over twice in ten minutes
can you?"
ARENAS never replied, but went straight
down 10 Wizards Hotel and went to bed
.'ELI PERKINS"