davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09
MOURNING AN EMPEROR.
How They DO the Thing in the FIowery
Kingdom.

How They DO the InAhS IN Gne FAoWeEy
Kingdom.
The London Weekly Dispatch has the
following
g The Emperor of China being dead,
all his subjects, according to their rank,
will be required to mourn ms deceaSe.
On the proclamation of the Governor of
the province, the mandar1ns under him
not only put on mourning, but paint out
the decorations on their house walls, and
wrap their sedan chairs in black cloth.
The common people have to shave their
heads. and also to perform certain cere-
monies prescribed especially for them !;
but as for the mandarins and loose
gentry. on q second proclamation from
the Governor of the province, they meet
together on certain appointed days in a
particular temple, to lift up their
lamentations for the departed monarch,
whom most of these mourners never
once beheld. The mode of their pro-
ceedings is in this wise The mandarins,
gentry and others entitled to take part
In the ceremonial, having mustered in
side the temple, slowly and silently take
up each one the position prescribed for
him, according to his rank, on a raised
platform previously prepared. This
| done. a professor of ceremony appears
upon the scene. Everything being
ready the professor, amid profound
silence, calls out in o commanding tone
Kneel DOWN. Immediately one hun
dred individuals, more or less, being the
highest in rank and power in the prov
ince, simultaneously fall PROSTATE.
Then the next order comes: Knock
your heads once ON the ground, which
the company Immediately do. Again
and again the foreheads tap the floor,
and yet third time they are required tc
knock and knock.
..The professor, while they are still
on their hands and knees, now com
mands them to 'begin their lamenta
tions, whereupon these adult, rationa
beings commence to moan and weep IL
whimpeIing, subdued tone of voice
This having been kept mp for minute
or so, all are ordered to stop their cry
ing. rise up,' and disperse from theii
places which, by this time, they seen
not unwilling to do. Thus ends tn,
ceremony of three bowings and min
| knockings.' The funniest thing con
uected with the whole business is that
| until the Emperor's death has bee1
officially announced from Pekin, no
} body is supposed to be sorry. !
steamer commonly brings the news dow
: to province long before the Governor
} official dispatch arrives, and thus, thougl
the Emperor's decease is perfectly well
, known, everybody surprisingly com
mands his feelings, and goes about hi
, business as usual. It is only when th
Governor sends forth his public ar
nouncement that the land is convulse
: with sudden and universal sorrow
Happy is the monarch whom the peopl
delight to honor"
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09
A Horse-IOving clergyman.

"A Massachusetts, man youcles for thss
following ganecdote of old Priest Williams.
fifty years ago the pastor of the Congrp-
gational Church, he having overheard
the transaction when boy: The pastor
was $ particularly fond of good horses
and always kept his sspaeer." One OF
his parishioners, Jeremiah Shumway-.
owned . fine animal which the clergymaaa.
desired to possess, and one Sunday
morning Mr.. Shnmway drove up 20 tlaes
church door in fine style, just as thes
minister was about siismounting from lxisr
carriage, few steps away. The preach
er and his parishioner entered the church
door together. The former drew hiKn
aside q moment jerry, said the
good man, fanlifiarly, when I get tss
f5,rna mo t6e rood with my mare, and
after meeting is over, tell me how you
viii trade. = And they traded on Mop
day morning.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

An English physician recently removed
section of patients liver, placed it on
Q plate, scraped it carefully, and returned
it to its place, fully restored to its nor
NAL action. This promises to work q
revolution IN the treatment of disease,
and in few years we wiz have an atidl-
ton to domestic literature something
like this: g Husband, wish you would
take Johns right lung down TO the doc
tor this morning, and have the middle
lung fixed, q or, g win you stop into the
DOCTORS when you come home this noon,
and see If be has Mary's liver mended,
as she wants to go out to tea this even
ing. The practice win become SO COM
mon in time. we are sure, that none OF
the neighbors viii be IN any way startled
TO see wife, with veil tied around her
head, leaning out Of bedroom window,
and shouting TO receding husband
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

A CURIOUS cemetery exists in Paris.
Nothing human is inferred therein, vet
It has its COMMISSIONERS, its dead celebrities,
ITS graves sought by the multitude that
remember the occupants. the Yoricke
who have delighted them in life. This
graveyard Is almost q parody on the
solemn sleepers who have had Christian
burial This is the official cemetery of
the Jardin des Plantes. Over 700 bodies
Of animals that have died are buried In
It. The fayorite elephant, Chevrette
the first giraffe ever seen in Paris, and
lately the huge rhinoceros, are buried
there, The rhinoceros was one OF the
best known of all the animals in the
Jardin, having been In captivity nearly
thirty years.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

of lovely human Life. Let those who
have found that pearl of great pglce-
keep it SAFE Within the doors where
love dwells no evil things should enter.
and the loving bride who would be thee
happy wife must speedily guard against
her own impatience and despair, when
the lover la merging into the husband.
the Aatterer into the friend. - Margaret
EiaILoa.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

:sJer-e-naiah Tell DIR. Scrapen to send
up Wilie's right kidney at once, whether
it is done or not. He's had it there
more'n week, and the child might as
well be without any kidney, and done
with it !-DanbuTy Neaos
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

BRuYKRn once said: g An xnconaistnnk
woman ig one who is no longer In loyns
q false woman is one who Is already fn
owe with another person; flo kieSwoSsan
8 one wfso neither knows when shn
owes nor whether hhe loves or not. ana
he indifferent woman one who does nck
owe at all. y
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

sonrn one sent Delaware man by ex-
,,vess q paving-stone weighing thirty-slx
I,ounds. and as he opened the box after
paying $11 charges, his voice Was neard
nlear over II the next county.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

PuMPK1Ns viii keep better above.
Ground, unless the cellar is very dry and
cool. They are excellent food for milCh
cows In winter, making rich and flnm.
favored milk and beautiful yellow but
ter. Beets, turnips, carrots and pa1zniEE
possess greater faEtening properties, bnk
do not make as good milk.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09
Best Things.
/ Miles,. Fare.


The best theology pure and benefi-
cent life
The best philosophy contented
mind.
The best law-The golden rule.
: The best education-Self-know
The best statesmanship-S Self govern
ment.
The best medicine Cheerfulness and
temperance.
The best art-Painting smile upon
the brow of childhood.
The best misunderstanding sunshine
from a cloudy way.
The best war.To war against ones
weakness.
innocent child.
The best journalism Printing the
true and the beautiful only, on memory's 8
tablet.
The best telegraphing g-F Flashing q ray
of sunshine into the gloomy heart.
The best biography-The life which
writes charity in the largest letters.
The best mathematics That which
doubles the most joys and divides the
most sorrows.
The best Notwithstanding clear OF
the lacerating rocks of personal conten-
! ton.
AAC 0CcS -A4AAOC1AAxS5
of peace with ones own conscience.
The best engineering ng-Building 6
bridge of faith over the river of death
The Other Boy.
Says the New York Herald. The new.
that the Prince Imperial has left schoo
is very important. We have full &C
counts of this event in the EnglisI
papers. Royal boys are In the fashion
now. One 1S-year old lad has resigned
his tops and velocipedes to become Kin,
i of Spain. Another imperial lad is tod
ding on to the sacred throne of China. Tn
Spanish boy was born in 1857, and vii
be eighteen next November The youn,
Napoleon was born in 1856, and viii b
nineteen this month Accordingly, he j
year older than his royal brother, an
we are glad to learn that he is numbe
seven in his class, and the head of it i
fencing and riding. So that il Franc
wants sovereign here is
new Emperor ready on the yerg
of his nineteenth year, who can fene
and ride, and who win, If allowed, do {
much for France, ss by the grace of God,
as his royal brother Alfonso is doing *
Spain.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09

WHx is coachman like the clouds
Because he holds the reins.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09


Three little words you often
Are Articles a, and the.
Nouns the name of anything,
As school or garden, hoop or strirg.
Adjectives the kind of Noun,
As great, snldtt, pretty, trlite or broom
Instead OF Nouns the Pronouns stand
Her head, his face, your arm, nay hand.
Verbs tell something TO be done
To read, eossRt, laugh, sing, jump or risn.
VI.
How things are done the Adyerbs tell,
AS sIoaOly, quickly, ~ or sceli.
VIZ.
Conjunctions join the words together
As men and women, wind weather.
WIZ.
The Proposition stands before
A Noun, as ita, on through the door.
X.
The Interjection shows surprise,
A Oh! how pretty-4kl how wise.
The whole are called Nine Parts Of Speech
which reading. writing. speaking, teach.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09
How q Cat Won a Wager.

A number of persons were In the
American House billiard saloon recently,
when q man came in with cat in hIEs
arms A momentary wonder was e1-
pressed as to what the conapanionship~
meant, as men are not in the habit Of
going about with cats in their arInR-
The observers had not long TO wait, aR=
the cat-carrier exclaimed: sc Bet anybody
this cat viii carry q bottle of ale ten feet. y
Somebody, either doubling that pussy
would perform the feat or willing 20 seer
it done, took the bet. Two chalk knezs
were made on the floor, the bottle was
produced, and the performance began
The bottle was placed ON one mark, andfg
the cat was to carry it to the other. Seiz-
ing the animal by the tail the man hung
her head down over the bottle. Obeying
known impulse, the cat grabbed the
bottle with her fore feet. The man them
walked over to the chalk mark, and the,
cat, clinging desperately to the bottle
carried it along the floor, to the speci-
fed distance. The wager was won
Miners Journal.
The SUMS Eclipse.
The eclipse of the sun on the 9Th OF
April next is now exciting nearly as&
much interest among astronomers as thes
late transit of Venus. It will be total,
| and, according to the British astronomer
Hind, viii afford the best opportunfksE
for the observation of to4ality likely krs
be offered till toward the close OF fhRs
century. Although the course of the
central line in this eclipse is prinoipaIIy
sea track, fine opportunities fer ola
serving it will be had during its passage.
/ from the Nicobar Islands, In the Bay ek
Bengal, to Siam. The central eclipse.
it is computed, passing from the Moo
bars crosses Bentinck Island, where tRae.
maximum period of totality win be fuunK
minutes and seventeen seconds. AZ
several other adjacent insular stations
the phenomenon viii be observable for
about the same space of time. The Kins.
of Siam has heartily invited British and
other astronomers to make the ohseKyn-
tions within his dominions, and yo3un-
teered to extend them every facility and
q hospitality. - EEchQnQe.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1875-04-09
Grammar in Rhyme.

The name of the author of the follow
ing effusion should not have been allowed
to sink into oblivion unwept, nm
tude tn of generations yet unborn, for we
have never met with SO complete gram
mar of the English language in SO small
space. Old, as well as young, should
commit these lines to memory, for by
their aid it will be difficult, If not i'm.
possible, for them to fall into errors con.
cerning parts of speech:
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08
And she went

The California Democratic State
Convention will be held June 20.
Over 1000 silver lodes have been
opened in Utah against $500 in Color
ado.
In Minnesota, recently, it is said 800
locust eggs were foundin a single peck
of earth.
Mr.. Beecher is putting his testimony
in writing, and was filled two blank
books with it.
A Wen-known steamboatman was fa-
tally shot at Carver, MINI, Saturday,
by T. A. Douglas.
Gold has lately been discovered in
paying quantities at the famous Notch
in the White Mountains.
Frauds in the construction of the
new Boston Postofice have been
charged, and an investigation is to be
made.
The Boston furnishing goods house
of Simms Bros. & Co. has suspended
Liabilities $35O,OO0; extension prob
able.
On Thursday last, Louis A. Middle
ton, editor of the West Point, Missis-
sippi, Times, was shot and killed by
D. L. Love, editor of the West Point
Citizen, for an offensive article pub
lished by Middleton.
General Augur has taken command
of the department of the Gulf. Gen
eral Emory has left New Orleans for
Washington.
The mills at Lewistown, Maine, sup
ply employment for S544 operatives,
and produce annually manufactured
products to the value of $10,000,900.
H. T. Tuchens, a postmaster at Ma
souls, on the Memphis and Louisville
Railway, has been sentenced to one
years imprisonment for embezzlement.
At Locust Gap, Pa, Friday night,
striking miners dumped several cars
loaded with coal and burned the depot
and telegraph Office of the Reading
railway.
General Shaler has concluded to
abandon the work of recognizing the
Chicago fire department, being dis
couraged by want of cooperation by
the local authorities.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08
Parting Compliments.

We do not see what this Ohio House
could do that it hasn't done to dis
grace itself Gin. Com.
We trust that all the members the
Ohio Legislature will reach home in
safety and that few of them will ever
find the way back to Columbus.--[Ci Gin.
Enquirer.
This Democratic General Assembly
has raised a stencil all over the State,
and has died t in the odor of its own
infamy.-[ Gin. Gaz.
The record of the Democratic Gen
eral Assembly of 1S74-75 will be for
all time to come, we believe, the low
water mark in the history of Ohio Leg
islatures. It will be very difficult for
any future Legislatures in this State
to make record more disgraceful and
contemplate than that of the Legisla-
tnre which has just closed its misera-
BILE existence Cleveland Herald.
The discussion in the House of
Representatives, on the Wood county
bribery business, was simply disgust,
inc and disgraceful. It certainly
eq1aled the worst exhibition of de-
pravity ever given in the Legislature
of South Carolina.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08
Counting a Hundred.

A Danbury man named Reubens re-
Gently saw statement that counting
one hundred when tempted to sneak
an angry word. would save man a
great deal of trouble. This statement
sounded little singular at first, but
the more he read it over the more IA
vorably he became impressed with.it,
and finally concluded to adopt it,
Next door to Reubens lives man who
has made five distinct attempts in the
past fortnight to secure dinner of
green peas by the first of July, and ev-
cry time has been retarded by Reu-
ben's hens. The next morning after
Reubens made his resolution, this man
found his sixth attempt to have mis-
carried. Then he called on Reubens.
HE said
E sWhat in thunder do you mean by
letting your heDs tear up my gar
den p
Reubens was tempted to call him q
mud-shoot, a new name just coming
into general use, but he remembered
his resolution, put down his rage, and
meekly observed:
'One, two. three, four, five, six, sew
en-, eight -
Then the mad neighbor, who had
been eyeing this answer with a great
deal Of suspicion, broke in again
. why don't you answer my ques-
ton, you rascal?'
But still Reubens maintained his
equanimity, and went on with the
text
Nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen,
fourteen, fifteen, SIXTEEN
The mad neighbor stared harder
than ever.
Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, TWEEN
ty, twenty one
You are q mean skunk said the
mad neighbor, backing towards the
fence.
Reubens' face flushed at this charge,
but he only said
twenty-five, twenty three, twenty
four, twenty-five, tWenty-six.
At this figure the neighbor got up
on the fence in some haste, but sud-
denly thinking of his peas he again
spoke
You mean, low-lived rascal; for
two cents would knock your cracked
head over barn, would
Twenty seven, twenty-eight, in
terrupted ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS thir-
ty, thirty one, thirty-tWo, thirty three
Here the neighbor broke for the
house, and entering it, violently slam
med the door behind him; but Reu-
bens did not dare to let up on the emu
meration, and so he stood out there
alone. in his own yard, and kept on
counting, while his burning cheeks
and flashing eyes eloquently affirmed
his Judgment. When he got up into
the eighties, his wife came to the door
in some alarm. why, Reubens, what
is the matter with youP she said. DO
come into the house,
But he didn't let up. She came out
to him, and clung trembling to him,
but he only looked into her eyes and
said:
Ninety three, ninety-four, ninety
five, ninety six, ninety seven, ninety
eight, ninety mine, one hundred-go in
to the house, old woman, or I'll bust
ye.'
And she went.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08

The Tehuantepec railway, the COM
pletion of which is now in contem-
plation, runs from Aspinwall to Pan
anna across Mexico, and. when fully
constructed, will shorten the time Of
travelling from New York to San Fran
cisco by six or seven days. General
Dodoe. the chief engineer, has been
preparing plans and estimates of the
work, and he prOnounces the project
entirely feasible and likely to prove q
great financial success.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08
LIGHT

The night has thousand eyes,
The day but one;
Yet the light OF the bright world dies
With the dying sun
The mind has thousand eyes,
And the heart but one;
Yet the light of q whole life dies
When day is cone.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08

We are not so sure about Uncle
William yet. We must have an Ohio
man for President. Hendricks was
born in Ohio, and Uncle William
wasn't. But Uncle William would have
been, probably, if he hadn't been born
before Ohio. The question remains
open for discussion, whether we shall
withdraw our support from. Uncle
William,=EO. s journal.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08

The selection of Judge Day, Judge
Okey, and Mr.. NJ. A Daugherty to
revise and codify the laws of the State
reflects credit on Gov. Allen. Judge
Day has lately retired from the bench
of the Supreme Court, and his eminent
abilities are recognized everywhere.
Judge Okey has prepared digest of
the decisions of the Supreme Court,
and has also published a codification
of the municipal laws of the State.
His appointment was recommended
by nearly all the members of the Gin
cinnati bar, Mr.. Daughterty is a law
yer of good standing. The work the
commission is to perform is very i'm
portant and greatly needed CinciR-
natl Gazette.
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08
If 4 SHOULDDIE.

If should die to might,
My friends would look upon my diving face
Before they laid it in its resting place,
And deem that death had left it almost fair:
And, laying show-white flowers against my hair,
Would smooth it down to fearful tenderness,
And fold my hands with lingering caress,
Poor hands so empty and so cold, to-nightr'
II should die tonight,
My friends would call to mind with loving
thought,
Some kindly deed the icy hand had wrought,
Some gentle words the frozen lips had said:
Errands on which the willing feet had sped;
The memory of my selfShneSs and pride,
My hasty wordsworth all be put aside,
And so should be loved and mourned tonight.
II 1 should die tonight
Even hearts estranged would turn once more to
me,
Recalling other days remersefully;
The eyes that chill ed me with aYerted glance
Would look upon me as of yore, perchance,
And soften in the old familiar way,
For who could war with dunn unconscious clay ?
So might rest forgiven Of all Tonight
Oh, friends, 1 pray tonight,
Keep not your kisses from nay dead, cold brow,
Think gently of me: am travel-Worn;
My feet are pierced with many thorn;
Forgive, hearts estran ged. forgive, plead;
When dreamless rest is mine, should not need
The tenderness for which long tonight
Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-04-08

Of the Cincinnati Southern Railway
bonds $6,7OO,O00 have been negotiat-
ed.
The Marietta rolling mills have
again been stopped by strike of the
puddlers.
Hon. R. G. Parsons, of Cleveland,
has gone to California on a visit. He
goes by the way of Panama.
The Directors of the Springfield,
Jackson and Pomeroy Narrow Gauge
railway had their first meeting at
Greenfield last Monday.
Circleville seems to be considerably
stirred up in reference to the Sciota
Valley railway. Chillicothe also is
taking an interest in the enterprise.
1t is the intention of the contractors
to complete the Atlantic and Lake
Erie railway as far north as the Cen
tral Ohio railway track by October l.
and to the crossing of the Columbus
and Mt. Vernon road by the first OF
next January.
The st. Clairsville Chronicle saws
Rev j. c. Thoburn, missionary to In
dia, who has been preaching in Calcut.
ia for the past year, and Rev. T. j.
Scott (Who is q brother of Mrs. H. C.
Welday of this place. }, and family, ex-
pect to return to America in April.