The Arizona sentinel., 1875-11-13
MISCELLANY.

A woman in Peoria, ILL.,, put a
copper cartridge in the stove to
melt the bullet. When it spread
itself it took one of her eyes along
with il.
Milwaukeeans are not all bad.
About one in every 5000 tries to
do right. A Milwaukeean of the
good sort has just returned hor-
rOWed book after keeping it TWEEN
ty-seven years.
A young man in music shop
was lately overpOwered by a
fastidiOus young lady, who want
ed to purchase "Mr. HoOd's-a-
song of the-a-gentleman'S un-
dergarment!" The young man is
still alive.
An editorial notice of a woman's
grocery store reads as follows :
Her tomatoes are as red as her
own cheeks; her indigo is as blue
as her own eyes, and her pepper
as hot as her own temper"
A Yankee has invented a milk
ing machine that can be carried
in a pocket-book. Now, if he
were to invent a mich COW that
could be carried in the coat tail
pocket, his machine would sell
more rapidly.
A prisoner in Burleson county,
Tex. who broke Jail the other day
and led to the woods, Was so bad
ly bitten by rattleSnskes within
an hour or two of his escape that
he was obliged to deliver himself
up in order to save his life.
Compact expression of wisdom
from the Milwaukee Ne,CS:: "Tbe
biggest fool was a girl in New
York who poisoned herself for a
dry goods clerk who parted his
hair in the middle and were an
orOide watch and chain"
The natural result Of an equal
commingling of the sexes in a
Wyoming jury was recently ex-
emplified in case wherein five
DAYS and nights of deIiberation
led-nOt to a verdict, of course
but to five opponents; and there
would undoubtedly have been six
if the remaining jurywoman had
not been a mature mother in-laW.
Rochester Union.
A Colorado poet sends to the
Denver Iri6Gae an "Ode to Or
tum." We have no room unfOr-
tunately, but for the two conclud-
ing stanZaS:
would not dy IN Ortum.
With peaches fit for eatin'
When the wsvy corn is gettin' wripe
d. the candidates are treatin';
When sassidge meat is fryin'
And hickory nuts Is thick,
Ow. who would think OF dyin'
Or even getting sick
A colored man, who was lately
resucitateG from what seemed
death, but was onlycatalepsy, was
entertaining his friends with the
sights he beheld in the other
world. "Plenty colored bredreu
in Heaven, / spec Tom" sc
yesW said Tom. "And how about
hell-any down there?" asked an
other interlocutor. ooh, yes.
massa, plenty of dem der t0o.'
ANY white folks Tom?" Lord
save US, der amt no end on 'em
but, by gosh, massa, cherry white
man done got a niger holdin' he
tween him and de firep
SATISFIED THE LAWYER
"Sir," asked an attornay of a wit
ness in a San Francisco court, who
was testifying in case of assault
and battery, shave you ever been
in this court before?''
eyes, sir" replied the witness
ST have been here often"
"Ah, been here often, have
yOu?" said the attorney in tri'
umphat tone. "NOW, tell the
court what for"
"Well," replied the witness
slowly, 81 have been here at least
a dozen times to see you, to try
and collect that taiIor's bill you
owe"
A New Jersey Granger heard a
great noise among his chickens
the other evening. and thinking
thieves were despoiling his roost
he rushed out with vengeance in
his eye and shotgun in his hand
but discovered no one about. Their
he counted his fowls, bat instead
of some being missing, he found
six more than belonged to him
His eyesight being little defec
tive he didn't discover until the
next morning that he had count
cd six vigorous mosquitoes of the
New Jersey brand, which had
been accidentally fastened in the
coop with his hens. 81 thought
they were rather too big for chic
kens when | counted 'em," he af
forwards remarked.
GENUINE FOOLs.-He who