The Saline County journal. [volume] (Salina, Kan.) 1871-1893, 1875-09-16
Champ and the Soda Fountain.


the old lady entered the store. II was
hot weather, and the soda fountain look
ed so tempting that she conquered her
avarice and walked over and told Champ
that she would take glas.
''Do you wish for fly in il? " he in
CURED in whisper.
"a fly ERASMUS no." she replied, q
look of disgust on her face.
"Just as you say madam" he went on
as he drew some lemon syrup. "Peo-
pie are so different in tastes, you know.
Some objcc, to flies and some don't. I'll
mix some pineapple syrup with this
lemon, and now you'll have plenty of
gas and a little water, or q great deal of
water and little gas.
M'm purity thirsty" she said.
DWELL, then, you will want more wat
or than gas, and there won be so much
danger OF an explosion"
"Explosion, she queried.
"That was the word, madam. We
have bad but few such accidents here
this summer, and truly hope that we
may have no more"
docs soda water blow folks up ?"
That depends on the state OF their
health. Some people could stand here
and drink all day, while others might
get the glass tipped up this way, and
boom they'd 60"
"Bust 2"
"Yes'm-Gy into thousand pieces.
You never saw humane being explode,
did you ?"
"Mercy, no -
DWELL, you don't have the least warn
ing. They nay DC laughing or talking
and all ut once the store is filled with
false hair, monogram carriers, bustIes,
cOrsels, teeth, and rolled plate jewelry.
1t makes a great muss around here, and
if we hadn't three of the smartest ne
groes in town to pick up and sweep out
we have 10 shut up the store tor 4
whole afternoon after an explosion"
He STOOD with the glass in his hand
agitating the syrup and waiting, and
she said
al didn't suppose IT was dangerous
stuff"
DWELL, as told you, it depends on
the state of the system. 1t your liver
is torpid and your digestion impaired +,
one glass of soda would blow you high
CT than Gildroy's kite, and the coroner
would be lucky 10 find rs much as your
spectacles 10 hold an inquest on. II
your system is all right, you may drink
Il hundred glasses and feel no disastrous
effects. Now then you'll have great
deal Of water but little gas, ell :"
She made Il depreca,ory motion and
asked;
.iiow's the stuff mado!"
"Wcll can't 30 on and explain all
the process. There's marble dust,
acid, gas, sugar-coated pills, giant pow
der, cologne water ami Kerosene, all
mixed together and distilled. The dis,
TILED liquid is then placed in a resort,
where q chemical action separates it,
and the gas forces it through separate
pipes"
"kerosene and pills, she gasped.
That's what | said, madam. You
look innocent and honest, and I hope
you won't say anything about it.
tend this fountain in order 10 support a
widowed mother and seven fatheress
children. If you should say anything
I'd be discharged, and if | were dis
charged | would commit suicide. You
will have plenty water, eh?"
"No, sir, ~ she replied. ado
you think Ia drink acids and kcro-
some ?"
"Not in their crude state madam, but
this process
81 don't caro- for the process" she
snapped. III would rot touch the
stuff"
at is mild beverage, madam, and
the doc"
"WclI, | don't want any. When go
10 swallering tar and lard and kerosene
you'll know ii. S'poscn | drank some
and exploded !"
Don't mention it," hc whispered.
Don't speak oft"
"l'm sorry for you, young man, but
there's Il constat lie living right in sight of
our house, and think -
you'll drive me 10 q suicide grave
You mean"
She lowers her spectacics, took Il
inrli at him, and went out without re
Ply ing.