Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-05-20
How Jones Killed Himself.

friends feared that some evil conse-
quences would ensue. Their apprehen-
sions were realized. Jones called upon
Peter Lamb, and asked him II he hac
revolver, ana Peter said he had. Jones
asked Lamb to lend it to him, and Peter
did SO. Then Jones informed Peter that
he had made up his mind to commit
suicide. He said that since Miss Bangs
had dealt so unkindly with him he felt
that life was an insupportable burden,
and he could find relief only in the tomb.
He intended to go down by the river
shore and there blow out his brains, and
SO end all this suffering and grief, and
bid farewell to a world that had grown
dark to him. He said that be mentioned
the fact to Lamb in confidence because
he wanted him TO perform some little
offices for him when he was gone. He
intrusted to Lamb a sonnet entitled " A
Last Farewell" and addressed 20 Julia
Bangs This he asked should be de-
liYered to Miss Bangs as soon as his
corpse was discovered. He said it might
excite pang in her bosom and induce
her to cherish his memory. Then he
gave Peter his watch as a keepsake, and
handed him forty dollars with which he
desired Mr. Lamb to purchase a tomb
stone. He said he would prefer plain
one with his simple name cut upon it,
and he wanted the funeral to be as I'M
ostentatiOus as possible.
Peter promised to fulfill these COM
missions, and he suggested that he would
lend Mr.. Jones bowie-kni with which
he could slash himself up if the pistol
failed
But the suicide said that he would
make sure work with the revolver al
though he was much obliged for the
offer all the same. He said he would
like Lamb to go around in the morning
and break the news as gently as posi-
bic to his unhappy mother, and to tell
her that his last thought was of her.
But he particularly requested that she
would not put on mourning for her
erring son.
Then he said that the awful act would
be performed on the beach, just below
the gas-works, and he wished Peter to
come out with some kind Of vehicle to
bring the remains home. If Julia came
to the funeral she was to have q seat in
the carriage next to the hearse, and If
she wanted his heart it was to be given
to her in alcohol. 1t beat only for her.
Peter was to tell his employers at the
store that he parted with them with re-
greet, but doubtless they would find some
other person more worthy Of their con
fdence and esteem. lie said he didn't
care where he was buried, but let it be
in some lonely place far from the tur-
MOL and trouble of the world, some
place where the grass grew green and
where the birds came to carol in the
early spring time.
Mr. Lamb asked him-if he preferred a
deep or shallow grave; but MIR. Jones
said it made very little lifference-when
the spirit was gone the mere earthly clay
was of little account. He owed seventy
cents for billiards down at Sch0tt's sa-
loon and Lamb was to pay that out Of
the money in his hands and to request
the clergyman not to preach a sermon at
the cemetery. Then he shook hands
with Peter and went away to his awful
DOOM
The next morning Mr.. Lamb wrote TO
Julia, stopped in to tell them at the store,
and nearly killed Mrs. Jones with the
intelligence. Then he borrowed Cooley's
wagon, and taking with him the Coroner
he drove out to the beach just below the
gas-works to fetch home the mutilated
corpse. When they reached the spot the
body was not there, and Peter said he
was very much afraid it had been washed
away by the flood-tide So they drove
up to Keyser's house, about half a mile
from the shore, to ask if any of the
folks there had heard the fatal pistol
shot or seen the body. On going around
to the wood-pile they saw Keyser hold
ing terrier dog backed close up against
a log. The dogs tail was lying across
the log and another man had the ak up
lifted. A second later the ak descended
anu cut ZIG Idll OIL CLOSE 10 Inc UOS, anu,
while keyser restrained the frantic ami
nal, the other man touched the bleeding
stump with caustic. AS they let the dog
go Lamb was amazed to see that the
chopper was the wretched suicide. He
was amazed, but before he could ask
any questions Aleck stepped up to him
and said:
Hush-sh-sh! Don't say anything
about that matter, l thought better of
it. The pistol looked so blamed danger
Gus when cooked it that I changed my
mind and came down here to Keyser's to
stay all night. I'm going to live just to
spite that Bangs girl. :"
Then the Coroner said that he didn't
consider he had been treated like a gen
tleman, and he had half a notion to give
Mr.. Jones pounding. But they all
drove home in the wagon, and, Just as
Mrs. Jones got done hugging Aleck, a
letter was handed him containing the
sonnet that he had SEM Julia. She re-
turned it with the remark that it was the
awfullest Slush she ever read, and that