The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1875-12-02


Lunar Cycle, but it did not know till
last week that there is an Erni-CycIe.
II the cackling Of geese saved Rome, the
wanee7ings of Josh in the wilderness led
to the discovery of this new Cycle, which
is all the more important to the world
since its period is Seventeen
thousand, seven hundred and seventy
nine years" and since A. ID. 1875 is the
first year of this Cycle, it ie not probable
that the world will ever see another
Erni-Cycle, therefore ecce homo.
This coup de plume of Ennis displays
a commendable intimacy With the cIas-
sizes, but it betrays 10 portions of the mar
atiye an avoidance Of truth which is NJ
terly inexplicable, unless we suppose
that he knew and felt that he ought not
to handle it, because
Truth is precious and divine,
Too rich a pearl for carnal swine :"
Ia his allusion to the climbing of sim
mon trees by the boys in the Old North
State. Erni doubtless had in mind and
wished to suggest the same idea to his
readers, that old libel, that they climbed
the trees for the sake of the simmons
This is a foul expression falsely cast, and
comes with bad grace from one who
GfI am not mistaken in Ennis idrntitv)
claims to have been born and raissd in
elk different counties in that dear old
State and every one them simnou tree
counties. The truth is, the climbing of
these trees was a .pasttime with the boys
and they attained to such skill in the art
that the squirrels just died of pure envy.
But, tradition relates that he (Josh)
played euchre with fascinating widow"
| will not pass this soft impeachment,
but will take at mp, and say that for once
tradition has handed out what Erni
rarely does-the truth-save in homeo-
pathic doses. The pleasure enjoyed by
Josh during that little game, would rich
ly compensate for weeks wandering in
the labYFinths of Isis, along the banks of
the Styx, or even in Spring Creek hot
tom, and he is vain enough to think that
had Erni been in his place, the fascinat-
ing lady would have declined his assis-
tqece, ordered him up, and event it
alone
The night, now made memorable, soas
dark; Egyptian darkness, was a beauti-
ful twilight in comparison. Why, you
could grab up a handful anywhere and
squeeze out forty drops of ink, rivaling
Arnold's best in blackness Nothing
could see in such darkness, save owls
and-Erni; regret that he is somewhat
at fault in his natural history. Frogs
don't k-r-o-n-k much in November, in
this climate, but there is no time lost to
the frogs, for Erni can beat the biggest
bull-frog k-r-O-n-k-i-n-g that ever scared
school boy. Erni is also mistaken as
to the tune played by those brass bands
Of which he spoke. 1t was not home,
sweet home" it was get out of the will
derness"
Josh did not leave the wedding bee in
a fright, nor upon a false pretense. In
this respect he was unlike a medical
friend of his, who, could not distinguish
himself from Erni.
" This, any man may sing or say,
In the ditty calPd, What if Dayi"
Sometime in the past, this NJ D. and
a pair of boon companions left Bolivar
in an old wagon drawn by q span of
Rosinates, and took their way to vii
lage some miles away, in which a ball
was to come off at night. Arrived at the
place, they concluded to spend the time
till the opening of the ball, in "bobbing
around" aud "d,ing" the town. The
The excitement of an election was high
and Erni, on reaching a squad ofpersons
en- the walk, sung out, hurrah for
johnson" A few muttered curse was
all the response he received, and he pass
ed rapidly on AMI soon came to another
crowd He thought he would be sure to
be right this time, so he changed his tune
and sung out, "h-o-o-r-a-A for Cheat
pistol was accidentally discharged Just
at this time, and he never finished the
name; neither did he stay to tender his
surgical skill to the wounded, but went
Nth the fleetness and strides of an os-
trich, to the house of friend, half a
mile of, and with what wind aud calm
ness such a run had left in him, related
that he had just received a call to attend
an extremely urgent case, ten miles out
on the Bolivar road, land" said he,
" for Gods sake let me have your horse"
JOSH
Startling Occurrence at the Crystal