The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1875-09-17
NEW NoR'-wEsTERs.

ber.
-Taxidermy for parents-If you wan
to preserve your children, do not stuf
them.
/ Wherever three or four thieves art
banded together there may you find {
'srif1e'' team.
The man who stretches the clothslint
say he believes in sac transit gloria, any day
but lNu1sda.
Among the assets of Duncan, Sherman
& Co. are some hundreds of shares in the
Yuba Dam Canal.
Darwin has an income of $4,000 q
year because he believes his grandfather te
have been gorilla.
Striped goods are going to be fashiona-
bic this winter at Auburn, Sing Sing, Jack
son, Columbus and other places.
Fulton, the successful rifle shot, was at
one time foreman in the composing room
of the Central City (Col.) Register.
sc Walkin & Scar" is the firm name of
two female partners in the shirt-making
business in Chicago, and people do.
-Grasshoppers have appeared in Africa
in great numbers, and the natives are max
ing dried beef of them for winter use.
Gen. Crook hasn't had fight with the
Indians for a fortnight, and he says that
affairs have got to change or he will resign.
A blind mendicant in Boston wears this
inscription round his neck: "Don't be
ashamed to give only a halfpenny. can't
see."
If the Cuban war lasts ten or fifteen
years longer people will begin to imagine
that there's really some sort of trouble
there.
1t is remarked as a singular fact that
every Chicago journalist who goes on a va
cation comes home with sticking plaster on
his nose
1t would gladden. the heart of Susan B.
to visit Western Louisiana and see men
carrying water two miles for their wives to
wash with.
In an up town shop window is display
ed the following notice: Boy wanted that
has fully rested himself and is not too in
tellectual."
1t is now announced that Spotted Tail
won't consent to sell the Black Hills coun-
try. He'd rather mortgage it on long time
at ten per cent.
The Rev. Murray says he sometimes
thinks that horses have souls. The horses
around the country are expected to say
something nice in reply.
They say that hiccoughs can be cured
by catching the hiccougher by the throat
and hanging on until his eyes stand out like
the fare of an eight-day clock
Prof. Wise surface
other day he remarked: "Easterly cur
rents be d. only this and nothing
more
Seth Greene says that editors can never
be successful fishermen. They get diseour-
aged after few minutes and throw down
the rod to write an abusive article on the
finny tribe.
The Philadelphia Times has a secret
trap door in its Office, on which all inquisi-
tive and annoying visitors are put, when
spring is touched, and they descend to the
door beneath.
New York is shocked at the idea Of
sixteen persons living, eating and sleeping
in room 12x14. We should think that
some of the unfortunates would go and buy
brown stone mansion.
When Kansas paper speaks of Mar
shall Benzine. Marshal Bazane must feel as
if he would like to come over here and gall
lop through few printing offices with a
keg of powder in each hand.
A Cairo lawyer agreed to go out and
duel Cairo doctor, but when O'Clock in
the morning came they met each other at
the depot, each having a satchel, and each
intent ON getting to ST. Louis by an airline
route.
1t is too frequently the case for papers
of low order of intelligence to ridicule the
college graduate as a helpless and useless
individual Mr.. Avery, of Yale, however,
graduated only month ago, and already
he has secured position of trust at sala-
ry of $4,000 year. It is as pitcher of
professional base ball club.
Mrs. Scott-Siddons is a better rifle
woman than Queen Victoria. The Queen
uses Il rifle fixed in a wise, and sighted on
bull's-eye. The other day Mrs. Scott-Sid-
dons fired at a long range target from the
shoulder, and pierced the bulFs-eye at the
first shot. 1t was in Devonshire, and the
Devon volunteers cheered the lady with
much enthusiasm.
-Beecher is now charged with the failure
of j. B. Ford & Co. We believe he made
j. B. Ford & Co. to very respectable ex-
tent, but of course that has nothing to do
with the case. We believe also that he is
responsible for the unhappy mistake of
Benedict Arnold, and if the friends of Tilton
do not develop the fact in the latter case
they are not the men we take them to be-
dorchester Democrat.
Two South street men met in the post
office lobby Saturday morning. The mail
was being distributed and the men began
talking to kill time. Anything new 9'
inquired Mr. Slocum. "I don't hear of
anything, no, z replied Mr.. Marble. Then
they sat down together on the window-sill
and talked till the mail opened, and when
| they went out each had told the other
about forty-nine separate and distinct bits
| of news.
When man gets in a load of cord
word, intending to cut it up himself and
save the expense of hiring a sawyer, he
| works something like this: First stick
n,,n a ', ex,o1,,I