American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1875-05-22
CANTON, MISS, SATURDAY, MAY p, 1876

recipient of packages of medicines for
warded to me by e-terprising persons
some were accompanied by letters urg
ing "single trial and a certificate from
either Moses or myself" and the carrot
cathartic, parsnip purge and turnip tonic
offered me the sole agency for the State
provided I would affirm that Moses
owed his life to a free usage of that In.
| valuable remedy" What is more WOE
derful, the doctor got practice through
Moses. Baby COLES became epidemic in
our streets and all Granville was afflict
ed with whitlows, and occasional tract
ures made their appearance, and the
| doOr-bel became nocturnal grievance.
If Moses cure brought its rewards it
bore its penalties. We were interviewed.
Why, in addition to the simple story of
the monkey, my wife's personal appear
ance, her age, my political opinions and
the varied articles of clothing hanging in
the garden to dry were catalogued-quite
| facetiOusly, of course-and spread before
| 100000 readers, l am at a loss to say.
This October was in receipt of the
following letter, which l read to the doc
tor and my wife:
| DEAR SIR-ThrOugh our travelling agent,
who passed through your enterprising town
| some weeks ago, 1 hear that Moses IS well.
Chuf1ers, whose zebra shows some sign of
founder, wants to know, having . high re-
spect for your brother in-law, DIR. Parry's
abilities-he wants to know if he would like
to undertake curing the zebra. OF course
the monkey is yourn, but if $50 will fetch
ship him p me c. o. D. But my few lines is
mostly writ for another purpose, as follows:
that the doctor who cured Moses might do
our daughter some good. Mebbe she dreamed
it. l don't never take on to view contrary to
hern, for she made me by her good advice
what am. This, then, is to say that If Dr.
Parry will come to our place and take charge
of our suffering girl, and do the best he can,
we don't ask any more. 1t amt out of the
way in me in a case like this to say that
money amt no object. Hoping to hear from
you by return mail, am, with great respect,
SAUL KosIOsKO WOGGLAM.
P.S.-My programme-man mostly does my
writing, so you'll examine this. Chufhers begs
to , send some ove-birds to your madame.
They are pretty creatures, and l hope the
cage l have chosen will prove acceptable,
likewise ornamental s. X. w.
"Will you go?" 1 asked.
" Certainly" said the doctor, without a
moments hesitation.
"Would you mind taking friend with
you? l inquired.
You mean Moses?" said the doctor.
=" Not bit"
81 mention with regret" added my
wife, "that tendency Moses has to go
to sleep in the babys crib, though origi
nal, is not generally pleasing, and that
certain substitutions of food Moses in
sists on for my own darling are detri-
mental to infantile nouri5hment."
The doctor and Moses left the next
day. The monkey had no regrets. In fact
of late he had assumed a staggering
and swashbuckler air. am inclined to
think his long sojeurn in the happy fam
lily had so fully imbued his ideas with
that peculiar condition of existence that
he thought he was superior. Certainly
lie presumed on our good nature, and
had commenced to bully us. Moses
adieu was touchingly evinced by his loll-
ing out his tongue, and winking to
my wife in singularly impertinent, yet
patronizing, manner. Here is the last
episode in this monkey history. 1t is a
letter from DIR. Parry to his sister, my
wife, read by me to her at breakfast
table:
DECEMBER, 1S74.-MY DEAR SIsTER-Resi-
dence here is both agreeable and profitable.
IL is probable that / will cast anchor in this
thriving town. How it is can hardly state,
but have been so busy that trust this will
excuse my having written to you so rarely for
the last month or so. The young lady, the
daughter of the gentleman at whose instiga-
ton came here-this young lady found had
been miserably treated. Some mechanical
appliances, novel ones of my own, have given
the most fortunate results. Our Invalid de-
clares herself freer from pain than she has
been for years. A week ago she put aside
her cru.ch, and l see no reason why, God
willing, she should not in time be perfectly
well. Her resignation under suffering, her
amiability and sweet temper" My wife
"Ahem! is that underscoredT mo-" said,
"allow me to continue" must accelerate her
cure. Miss Wogglam is highly educated and
a thorough musician and sings and plays de-
lightfully. cannot express to you the graf
gone" "Who is gone ?" asked. My wife
" Read on."] The young lady's father, one of
the most important men in the place, and her
mother overwhelm me with gratitude. Kind
est regards to your husband. l am, most af-
fectionately, AMBROSE.
P. S.-Moses is well, and. believe, profess
sionally employed. A.
THAT is all. Stop, there is an inclos-
ure. 1t feels hard. 1t is probably Moses
photograph"
Nonsense" said my wife. lit can
be nothing else than the young lady's |
picture. Hand it to me quickly. What a
pretty, modest, girllsh face. Somewhat |
saddened by pain, spiritualized like, |
which adds to its charms. / knew it, |
felt it, was sure of it. Here are the |
young lady's initials and my brothers |
on the back. He is gone, GER |
tain. They both want to intimate to |
Who is gomez" inquired. Don't
be enigmatical.
Glow stupid! AS sure as l am your
wife, that brother OF mine will marry |
that GIRL" replied my lady, showing me
the picture.
"Anl see. Well, 1 should not be
was my answer.