The Republican journal., 1875-09-09
Mr.. Dinkie's Revenge.
4 DISASTROUS DINNER-PARTl

Naturally. my dear, 4 body meets with
many singular people in the course o.
keeping boarderS | think the queeres
folks that ever We're, have come and board
ed with me since MIR. johnson left me with
three little children, to earn my living by
the most ungratetul task that ever was
put upon womans shoulders tor there
are people that never think YOU can dc
enough tor 'em, and people that haven't
any consideration for your feelings, and
it turkey happens to be tough, ask il il
was ever known for certain what became
OF the pair that went into Noah's ark, and
the like OF that, you know and there are
people that have whimsies, and want raw
meat or scorched cinders, and people that
can't bear anything fried, and people that
won't touch pork and people that take
airs and don't pay, and people that are SO
tar from what they pretend to be that you
have to mention to them that their rooms
are wanted, and all sorts Of people who
DO all sorts Of queer things.
One OF the lueereSt things | ever knew
to be done by any boarder was done,
must say, by Mr.. Dinkie.
lie came to board with me about five
years ago, Just at Christmas time He
was bachelor about fifty years old,
should Judge, and his face was smooth
shaved. and he wore u mahogany-colored
Wig, and he was rather particular in his
dress. l1edJust met with disappointment
not in love, mind YOU, but in money
lie had made himself q slave to rich
old uncle for twenty years, expecting to
be his heir; put up with all sorts OF treat
ment been huhcd and scoldeu and snccred
at morning. noon and night never said II
word but Just went on grinning and rub
blng his hands and speaking about his
dear uncle,' until the old man died,
when he left him only u hundred year
tor his lite. After that he came to board
with me
There was boarding with me ut the
same time maiden lady named Swiflcs.
She was about rs old as Mr. niu!lie. and
she was very rich. She wore diamonds in
her ears so big and so shiny that won
dercd the thieves let her come home alive
with 'em on. And she had the same Kind
of diamonds on her fingers She had three
pets, dog with curly wool, and a kitten
all white except black nose, and u green
and red parrot. Day-times She had them
| in her room, but she hired an extra room
lor them and they slept in that, and it was
cumical 10 see them. Poll in her cage,
and the dog and kitten in q sort OF basket
cradle, W it'll refreshments sent 'em in ease
they should be hungry in the night,
Everybody isn't so careful OF children
She had whiieIulted covers for the TWO
animals. 1t was peculiar, and She was
curious in good many things.
She wasn't very handsome, but She was
OF i very good family; and though She
wanted extras, she paid for 'em, re
member asking her once why she hadn't
married. and she said she always felt that
the male sex was beneath her, and that
she couldn't promise to obey any of em.
| She asked me if didn't feel to dtspile cln
myself; and | said some of 'elu | did, and
some again didn't
/ She had written II lecture, think for
the purpose of putting them down, and
| She was a-gong to deliver it iii my plrlnr
| one night; only | says to her says l.
"Miss Swilles," says |, 'l'm only Il poor
widow, depending on my boardcrs tor 4
| living and as most Of 'em are of the male
sex it might give 'em offence to tell 'en
all them dreadful things about themselves,
and how YOU despised 'em 30. Miss Swit-
| thankful
Wen, after Mr. Dinke came, noticed
| Miss SwiIlles and he used to argue tor
| gether good deal Sometimes, too, he
! used to see her to church and Ia lectures.
| | had my eyes about me- and noticed
| that she used to dress herself up very
smart indeed after he came
Then he came and asked me how much
| reckoned She had a wear. And she asked
what calculated he owned. | told hiA
| that ll heard that she had ten thousand
pounds, and told her what he had, and
| how he cot it. couldn't tell what she
thought, but made up my mind thert'd
be IL match between 'em, for I've always
noticed the more lady talks against the
gentlemen. the more apt she Is to have
the first one that makes her an otter Yes,
I'd made up my mind that way when, one
day, was sitting on the porch outside the
| back parlor window, stonin% cherries
tor if the girl does it she puts more in her
mouth than She does in the pan-whcn i
heard Miss Swilfles come into the paror
and, about three minutes after, MIR Dnkit
| he came in.
I'd like to remark, Just here, that far
from me being listening, I'm above it
but wasn't called upon to 90 away, and
| couldn't help hearing, and this is what
| did hear:
Miss Swiilles, /" said Nj Dinkie, II an
reioiced to lind YOU alone"
"Ah ~ said Miss Swiiles
Il have long wished for surh an oppor-
| tunity"
"Indeed," said Miss Swt1les
You can guess why p asked Mr. Pin
| kir
mo, sir. | cant answered Miss 5wil-
| fes
lis this the coquetry Of your sen R"
asked Mr.. Dinkie "lIa>e you not seen
that adore you?'
"No,' said Miss Swiillcs
II have hidden my emotions better Cham
| supposed could" said Mr. Dinkie. My
dear Miss Swiiles here on nay knees, al
low me to oller you my hand and heart.
and beg You to accept them and the lite
long devotion Of"
'Get up, MIR Dinkie," said Miss Swil-
flies. 'Don't make a goose of Yourself.
| understand that you ask me to marry
you?"
"Adorab.e creature" said Mr.. Dmke,
s'you put the question would have asked
into the most concise form"
"rll put tthe answerinto the same form, =
| said Miss Switlies. "No."
"You cannot expect me to rclinquish
my hopes at once" said Mr. Dinkie May
| ask why yon are not disposed to consid-
er my proposition? VIII you not consider
it, and answer it more at leisure?'
Il have considered, said Miss Swlllrs-
"Bnt why" SAID Mr.. Dnkie
| "Well, if YOU want to know Whyn said
Miss Switlles, "because like to be my
own mistress. have plenty Of money,
as you know, and three charming pets,
who are worth more than any six men
ever met. | didn't marry when | was 4
good-looking girl because even then
conldn't be sure any man wanted me and
not my property; and now am an ugly
old woman shan't throw myself into
the arms of the first fortune hunter who
has calculated that on old maid will mar
~ any one who asks her. You waited for
dead mems shoes twenty years, | under
| ctapI NnW nroha bly Won yiSh ta yUa If