Vermont farmer. [volume] (Newport, Orleans County, Vt.) 1870-1877, 1875-08-06
Astronomy Extraordinary.

ing heavenward from the public square, and
he stood beside it and thoughtfully in
CURED
"ls it possible, gentlemen, that you do
not care to Wow the beautiful works Of
nature above the earth2 Can It be true
that men of true intellectual appearance
will sordidly cling to ten cents rather than
take look through this telescope aud bring
the beauties Of heaven within one and one.
half miles of your eyes ~
The appeal was too much for the young
man to resist he was tall young man,
with long face, high check bones, aud
anxious look. He looked at the ten cents
aud then at the telescope, hestating for a
single instant and took his seat on the stool.
"Here is young man who prefers to
feast his soul with scientific knowledge
rather than become sordid grasping, ava
ricious capitalist, remarked the astronomer,
as he arranged the instrument. "Fall back,
you people, who prefer the paltry sum of
ten cents to a view Of the gates Of paradise,
and give this noble young man plenty of
ROOM"
The noble young man removed his hat.
placed his eye to the instrument, cloth was
thrown over his head, and the astronomer
continued
behold the bright star Of Venus A
sight Of the star is worth thousand dol
lars to any man who prefers education to
money" There was an instant of deep
silence, and then the young man exclaimed
"By gosh !"
stood behind him and knew that the
telescope pointed at the fifth story Of a
building across the square, where a dance
was in progress.
GAN of them indulge in EXPLANATIONS Of
admiration as they view the beauties aud
mysteries Of Dature," remarked the astron-
omer. Young man, tell the crowd what
you see"
81 see Teller hugging girl! !" was the
prompt reply-"durned if there isn't a
dozen Of them ~
"And yet" continued the astronomer,
'there are sordid wretches in this crowd
who hang to ten cents in preference to OBJ
serving such sights as these in ethereal space.
Venus is millions of miles away, and yet by
means Of this telescope and by pay
ing ten cents this intellectual young man
is enabled to observe the inhabitants Of that
iar.Of world hugging each other just as nat
urally as they do in this"
The instrument was wheeled around to
bear on the tower Of engine house No. I
five blocks away, and the astronomer con-
tinuel,-
behold the beauties and the wonders Of
Saturn This star, to the naked eye, ap
pears no larger than silver half.dolar, and
yet for the paltry sum Of ten cents this no
BILE young man is placed within one mile o
it,
"By Jerusalem and coons !" uttered tn,
young man, as he slapped his leg.
"Tell me what you see, my friend"
81 see two fellows in small room, smok.
ing cigars and playing euchre," was the
prompt reply.
Saturn is S6,000,000 of miles from thi
f town." continued the astronomer, "and ye
the insignificant sum Of ten cents. has EN-
abled this progressive young man to learn TO
himself that the celestial beings enjoy them
selves pretty much as we do in this world
venture to say that there is not man il
this crowd who ever knew before that the in
, habtants of Saturn knew anything abou
J euchre or had cigar factories
5 The instrument was changed again, and as
the interest of the crowd increased and the
: people began to press nearer, the professor
Q said
Nov behold the planet Mars, the secon,
, largest in the heavens. 1t is 5,46l 80
: miles from here and appears to the naked ey
f to be nothing more than bright star, an
, yet let this young man tell you what he sees.
: Half milo up the street in the top stor
i of big building was an evening schoo
: The telescope got the range of one Of tn
5 windows and the young man almost leape
+ from the stool as he shouted, "lIokey
:, allgators !"
= at has been asserted by college astror
, omers that the planet of Mars is not il
t habited," remarked the pr ofessor, in quiet
$ cutting tones. "Some of them, pulled u
with their arrogance, have called me
y swindler, and have abused this instrument
e which was constructed for me by order @
: the late Emperor Napoleon at a cost {
e s75 900, but let this observing young ma
!. tell you what he Sees"
@ ''Whotstones and whiffietrees ?" exclaime
}, the young man.
8 "Tell them-tell them, my young frienC
r what you see," urged the astronomer.
G There's Teller sitting on a bench b.
l. side girl. saw him pinch her ear, an
G she hit him with book Darn my button
d but she's ALFRED purity"
d "Gentemen, | am no blow-hard," sal
C the professor, in husky tones 81 do n,
d want to say what this telescope can d.
# You have the word of one of your fellow
10 townsmen, and do not believe that any
y you will dispute him. have been called
d swindler, gentlemen, because | 60 aroun
3, the country tearing away from astronom
ID the veil Of mystery with which so-calC
:, professors, drawing heavy salaries, seek
l. cover it. For the ridiculous sum of ten cen
@ ] am giving the public more astronomic
s. knowledge i1 half an hour than any colleg
/, professor can give you in six months.
Is demonstrate to you that the planet of Ma
re is not only inhabited by human beings, b.
b. by beautiful girls with red hair, aud by sty
il ish young men wearing the best kind of sto
i. clothes"
IS Once more he wheeled the instrumel
e. around. This time it got the range Of III
4, upper story of tenement house on the hi
IN The young man had scarcely taken glau,
,r through the tube when he yelled out
D. "Great guns But what planet is this
"You are now looking at Uranus" repli,
ID the professor. Uranus is 81 ,502, 304 mil
m distant from the earth, and yet | warra
al that it doesn't appear over eighty rods ava
is to you. Will you be kind enough my frier
Ill to tell this crowd what you see :"
y "Give it to him Whack him back G
u in, old woman |" shouted the young ma
u Shaping one leg and then the other.
~ "Speak up, my friend what do you sea
y, CHATS it Got him by the hair now
rs I'll bet fifty to one that she'll lick !"
OF "Won't you be kind enough my frien
is to allay the curiosity of your friends ?"
# "WhOop that's it, now she's got him