Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1875-04-09
SEEDS FROM THE GOVERNMENT L.

! ARE you aware, says MAX hueleI
that the Agricultural Departm mt at
Washington is in the habit of distrib-
uting seeds to those tillers Of the soil
who happen to want them? Last
spring my Congressman sent me a
large package Of choice, assorted gar
den seeds, brought by the department
from California. There were more
than l wanted, so l gave a lot Of sugar
beet and onion seed to Coolcy, my Acxt
door neighbor on the right; and some
turnip and raddish seeds to Pitman,
my neighbor on the left. Then |
planted the rest-turnip, cabbage, Gel
cry, and the beet seed in my own gar
den. When the plants began to come
up l thought they looked kind of
queer, but / waited until they grew
larger, and then, as felt certain some
thing was wrong, | sent for a profes-
sio1al gardener, as | didn't know much
about such things myself.
"Mr. Hoops" | said, "cast your eye
over those turnips and tell me what
You think is the matter with them. =
"Turnip'' exclaimed Mr.. Hoops
'"rurnip! Why, bless your soul, man,
that not turnip. That's nothin but
pokebe.Iy. You've got enough poke
berry in that bed to last a million Of
years"
"Well Mr.. Hoops, come over here to
this bed. Now how does that celery
strike you? The munihcent Federal
government is spreading that celery all
over this land Of the free. Great,
ism it?
Well, well" said Hoops, " and
they showed that off on you for celery,
did they Too bad its nothing on
earth but pokeberry. This is TIE Cad
! iforna kind-the doadliest pokoberry
that ever was invented"
care you sure you are notmi:taken,
Mr.. HOOPS? But you haven't seen
my bects there in the adjoining bed.
The seed Of those bcets was sent from
Honolulu by our consul there. lie
reports that The variety attains 81
cantic size
"Neal!y, now, said Hoops, Il don
want to hurt your feelings, but to be
fair and square with you, as betwce'
man and man, them S no bects. Them
the Mexican pokeberry. ! pledge
you my word its the awfulest variety
of that plant that grows, ltlI stay
in that yer garden forever, You'll
never sit rid ofit,"
"This seems little rough Hoops
but I'd like you to inspect my cabbage
They re all right, | know. The com
missioner Of Agriculture got the seec
from Borneo. They are the curley
variety, think. YOU boil them Will
pork, and they slice down beautifully
for slaw. Look at those plants AIM
they splendid?' ?'
"Mr. Adeler," said Hoop, "I've go
some bad news to break to you, but
hope you'll stand it like a man, fOl
these atllictions come to all Of us il
this lie, sir They are meant for oul
good. But really, sir, them's no cab
bages. Borneo cabbages ! Why
thunder and lghtnin them merely
a mixture Of California and Mexican
pok ,berrywith the ordinary kind, anC
a little Usage orange sprinkled in
Its awful, sir, awluI, Why, you've
got about two acres Of poheberry ant
not a bit Of cabbage or turnips among
them.'
Mr.. Hoops, this is terrible news
And DO You know gave a lot Of those
seeds to Pitman and Cooley?'
81 know you did, and | saw Mr.
Cooley this mornin' with a shot gun
going around asking people if they
!, knew where he coald find you
, Find me-what do you mean %
"Well, YOU see that onion seed tha
you gave him was really the seed o
the silver maple tree, and its growr
up so thick all OYER lis garden that ;
cat can t crawl through it. There i
about forty million shoots and sucker
in that garden, and they'll have to be
cut out with a hand saw. It'll tax,
about a year to do it"
nNru orp,ll ma IIoo,., -