Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-08-19
ITEMS OF INTEREST,

SHOULD chlrop0ulSlS Oe admltted TO the
Corn Exchange? asks the St Louis Times.
A PARROT in Dubuque recently set two
dogs to fighting by his natural imitation
of the human sic 'em! sic 'em!h
THE arlstocrats of st. Louis calls 'em
grass-ambulators" instead of grasshop-
pers. The soup tastes better under the
new name.
REwIvALIsTs, indeed!" said Mrs.
Darlington +" l amt got no patients with
such folks. I made my dear P. promise
faithful that if / proceeded him to my
grave he never would take another"
THE other day st. Louis girl who had
been pinning back her dress for some
time extended the fashion to her ears. All
the other girls saw it and followed suit.
A great shadow was Immediately removed
from the city of st. Louis, and for a time
the light seemed dazzling. 1t was as if
the sun had suddenly burst forth at mid
night Chicago Times
THE Buffalo Express, rightin the face
of the opening day of the races, ventures,
to remark gently that the race-horse is a
public nuisance, and damage to his
owner. The improvement of thorough
bred horses is one in which no public or,
private good is subserved.'' And then
goes on to say that "blood will not tell, :"
and that fast horse is an accident
A DETROIT bachelor, not rich, but in
dustrious and respectable, entered the
house of a widow on Baker street the
other day and said Z" Mrs Blank, I'll give
you just three minutes to answer whether,
you'll be my wife or not?" " only want
fifteen seconds-yes!" she answered, and
they sat down and began to plan how
many strawberries they would can this
summer.-Free Press.
AT the Meriden On. H. Reform School,.
the other day, a boy who had been called
up for chastisement began to run around,
the room instead, the instructor in full
chase with ferule. Finding he could
not catch him, he ordered several large
boys to seize the fugitive, which they no
sooner did than they were set upon by the
rest of the school, and free fight ensued
that was only quieted by the arrival Of an
officer.
MAYOR WALLER, of New London, Conn,
has g views on the subject oftramps, and
proposes to try them. He has issued an
order appointing special constables on the
roads leading into the city to arrest all
tramps, and directing the police to clear
the city of all unemployed vagabonds.
The first fellow arrested under this edict
was found to have on his person long
dirk, a heavy-loaded billy" and two
| raZOrS.
THEY have recently discovered a lot of
trees in California that are much larger
than the largest of the gigantic monarchs
of the forest in Calaveras, in that State
The stories told about their height and cir
cumference are marvellous. Incredible as
it may seem, one of them is of such i'm
mense size that man, though mounted
on a swift horse, could not ride around it
in less than it is almost impossible to say
how long.-EGchange
THE Delaware g. Hudson Canal Com
pany have placed upon their road running
from Fort Ticonderoga and Lake George
what is termed an observation or twilight
car. The sides are wholly removed as far.
as the window stills, leaving a clear, open
space for viewing scenery. Strong cur
tains are fixed above the opening, so that,
in case of storm, they can be lowered and
fastened Two seats run the entire length
of the car, back to back.
A MAN left his home one day in bad
temper because his wife said he ought to
save money for a rainy day. He thought
she had high notions and he said grand
ly, as if going to California, or to a lot
terry office in Algiers: will never come
back until ride home in my carriage"
She had seen him before and did not call
policeman; but, sure enough, her lord
kept his word, and that night he was sent
to her in a wheelbarrow, by a peeler.
ONE of the residents of the Hill recent
ly had dog which he was exceedingly
anxious to get rid of, and gave him the
slip repeatedly when he was abroad, but
the dog would generally reach home
ahead Of his master. AS a last resort, a
man was hired to shoot the animal, and,
when he was dead and buried, its owner
thought he had finally accomplished his
purpose. But neighbours dog a humble
instrument to prove the vanity Of human.
expectations, straightway went and digged
in the earth, exhumed the body of his re-
cent associate, and laid it on the doorstep
of the late residence of the deceased
Springfield (Nass.) RepublScan.
YESTERDAY morning a long-haired,
thick bearded stranger entered Griswold
street barber-shop, and in response to the
inquiry if he would like to be shaved he
replied " Yes, sir, you miserable, con-
temptble, skulking, highway pirate, I
would" He removed his hat, drew big
navy revolver, cooked it, and sitting down
in chair with the revolver in his hand
he continued: Now, 90 ahead. And if
you ask me to have my hair cut, or say
that l have dandruff, or cut my chin, or
ask me to buy your hair restorer, I'll
shoot you dead in your tracksr' That
barber didn't say one word while shaving
th at ms m