davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
Wit and HuInOr.

MEN of color-Dyers.
AwEEK conclusion@Sa Saturday night.
A PAIR of drawers-A span of team
horses.
CLERICAL errors-Departing from the
paths of rector-tude.
SpEoKLED Appendix says these grass
hoppers are eminently meat.
"I MUST marry that girl, F" said dis
consulate Young man; "she whistles,
and it'll never do to trife with the affec-
tions of girl that whistles"
"SoME sermonizers," said Sydney
Smith, "preach as if sin were to be
taken from men as Eve was from Adam,
by casting them into deep sleep"
A NORTHERN Californian discourages
immigration to the Pacific Slope with
the announcement that all the gals are
from Boston, and drinks are all twenty
! five cents.
EVEN the grave and classical New
York World is making puns. In
Thursdays issue of that paper there was
an article headed, 'fHow spitters should
expect to rate"
"I HAVE" says A. 7. Stewart, " made
it the rule of my life to give man the
value of his money. l know no man
who has succeeded for thirty years on
any other principle"
Is IT any wonder that our clothing
merchants can sell pants at two, three,
and four dollars pair, when the women
who make them are paid only one dollar
and twenty-five cents a dozen pairs ?
Springfield Republican.
eyes, you may come again next Sun
day evening, Horace, dear, but and
she hesitated. "What is it, darling?
Have I given you pain ?" he asked, as
She still remained silent. "You didn't
mean to, I'm sure" she responded,
"but next time please don't wear one
of those collars with the points turning
outward, they scratch SO. Utica Her
aid.
Upon Witnessing, recently, stalwart
Indian carrying drunken squaw up a
hill to the campoodle, near Austin, the
Reveille observes
The snow deep,
The hill steep,
line EQudW dsleep,
But still that Indian toiled on, and If he
didn't cry " Excelsior ' he said cheap
damn !"
ONE of our young men when he was
married didn't want to patronize the
baker. He said bread tasted ever so
much better made by her dear hands.
This delighted her. But when she
wanted scuttle of coal and he suggest
ed that she get it, as the fire would feel
SO much better if the coal was brought
by her dear hands, she was disgusted.
Women are 80 changeable. e.-Danbmy
! NelUs.
OLD Zachariah jackson, of Rocky
Gulch, New, is &C forty miner who has
been through the mill. The other day
he hobbled up to party of newcomers
and observed. "'Tend to yer bizness.
boys, and yell be all right. I've bin
here nigh thirty years, and have been
lynched, shot at, stabbed, knocked
down, thrown off a mountain, and mop
ped around generally, but I'm here to-
day, bigger'n box car"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
Vanguard VS.. Rear.GIfard.

1t is related of Napoleon that his last
words were " Iete d'arnlee ," Doubt
less, as the shadow of death obscured his
memory, the last thought that remained
for speech was of some event when he
was directing an important "head of
column" I believe that every General
who has handled armies in battle must
recall from his own experience the in
tensity of thought on some similar occa-
sion, when, by single command, he had
given the finishing stroke to some COM
plicated action but to me recurs another
thought that is worthy of record, and
may enct urage others who are to follow
us in our profession. I never saw the
rear of an army engaged in battle but I
feared that some calamity had happened
at the front-the apparent confusion,
broken wagons, crippled horses, men ly
ing about dead and manned, parties
fastening to and from seeming disorder,
and general apprehension ofsomething
dreadful about to ensue; all these signs,
however, lessened as Ineared the front,
and there the contrast was complete
perfect order, men and horses full of
confidence, and it was not unusual for
general hilarity, laughing and cheering.
Although cannon might be firing, the
musketry Gathering, and the enemy's
shot hitting close, there reigneda general
feeling of strength and security that bore
a marked contrast to the bloody signs
that had drifted rapidly to- the rear ];
therefore, for comfortand safety, I surely
would rather be at the front than the
rear line of battle. So also on the
march, the head of the column moves on
steadily, while the rear is alternately
halting and then rushing forward to
close up the gap; and all sorts of rumors,
especially the worst, float back to the
rear. Old troops invariably deem it a
special privilege to be in the front to be
at the "head of column because ex-
perience has taught them that it is the
easiest and most comfortable place, and
danger only adds zest and stimulus to
this fact.-tShern1ah' Memoirs.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
Nal de Mer.

We were in the Gulf Stream, knocking.
about in pretty rough sea. The effect
on a missionary stomach was the same as
that on the stomach of all landsmen.
I remember one morning when the
decks were in very disagreeable condi-
ton in consequence. After repeatedly
cleansing them, the patience of old Pease
was exhausted. He accordingly wrote
with piece of chalk on the companion
way: &c Passengers feeling seasick will
please go to leeward."
Soon Brother Bradlee emerged from
the cabin with rising breakfast. The
notice caught his eye, but not understand
ing its significance he staggered about
for moment and then gave occasion for
another application of the swab to the
decks. This done, he looked meekly
into the face of Mr.. Pease, who was re-
garding him with mingled expression
of pity and contempt.
al noticed the direction" humbly OBJ
served the divine, "but am not aware
what leeward means.
"Why, it means, the lee side of the
ship, of course" replied the second
mate.
(Which is the lee side I"
(Which is the lee side! Well, it's
t'other side of the weather side"
"A1id which is the weather side? ?'
"The weather sidel Sometimes it's
the starboard and sometimes its larboard
(for the term larboard was then in use).
It's the starboard, now we are on this
tack" ..
"Really," said Brother Bradlee, 'syou
must excuse me. I don't understand
these various terms. What's starboard2
What's larboard? What's tack2"
Placing his arms a-kimbo, while the
tottering missionary steadied himself by
a Delaying pin, Pease regarded him Tor
a moment as an object beneath the pity
or contempt thath he had at first bestowed
upon him, and then with expletive ear
nestness exclaimed
CHOW amt you pretty fellow for
missionary Going to convert the heath
en-, and don't know two sides of ship
twenty-five foot apart You'd better go
home the first vessel we speak and make
two or three costing voyages and then
try it again ; perhaps you'll learn some
thing"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
MuIllnnieS.

A resident in Egypt sends to friend
page from the I" Arabian Nights %:
"The Viceroy is constructing railway
from Alexandria to Rosetta, and In the
course of cutting it innumerable mum
mics have been turned up from time to
time. About month ago walked ou
to the cutting and found several coffins
in the shape of the human form, inside
which were bodies apparently in the
highest state of preservation but when
1 attempted to touch them they crum-
bled to atoms. Gold G) ornaments,
which I also discovered there were so
thoroughly decomposed that it was i'm
possible to obtain specimen,
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
A Child and an OySter.

The following is from the London
Solicitors Journal: "The English
law presents an extraordinary contrast.
On the one side it is held that the negli-
gence of a person having charge OF a
young child is the negligence of the
child and imputable to the child, and
that there is no redress if the child is
negligently run over. On the other
side, it is held that, though oysters are
negligently placed in a river-bed, it is
an injury rearessable by damages for a
vessel to negligently disturb them. The
child, were he an oyster, would be
protected but as child under analo-
gous circumstances of neglect he is with
out redress"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

A REPORTER for the st. Louis Times
recently interviewed Gen. Albert Pike,
who is at present attorney for the Choc-
taw nation of Indians. He holds that
the Indians Of Indian Territory have q
patent for their land, have kept up all
their obligations, and cannot be removed
or disturbed, except by invasion, the
government having no right to give one
hundred feet on each side of the track to
two railroad companies, as was done by
Secretary Delano, an act which Gen.
Pike termed "flibustering." Gen.
Pike says further "I can take 1000
Cherokees and whip any wild nation of
Indians on the plains. When. jeff. Da-
Wis sent me up there at the beginning of
the war, sent out a plug of tobacco,
tied around with ribbon, which they
call wampum, and bullet, saying to
the Comanches: you can take whichever
you like. If you want tobacco, come in
and make treaty. If you don't, have
a thousand Cherokees here with whom I
mean to clean You out. They came in.
The United States government could
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

FIVE hundred young men. recently
met together at Richmond, Va, as rep
resentatlves of Young Mems Christian
Associations in all parts of the country.
The convention was strikingly harmoni-
GUS, and In its avoidance of mistakes as
well as quarrels presented an excellent
model to other large conventions, whether
political or religious in their character.
The Young Mems Christian Association
has won the enviable reputation of hav-
ing accomplished vast amount of good
unaccompanied by any scandals provok-
ing public distrust, or any mistakes re-
sulting from misdirected zeal, and its
prosperity. as evidenced by the proceed
ings of the convention, is a matter over
which all thoughtful persons, whether
psofessedly religious or not, will be
heartily glad.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

REPORTS from the South concerning
the condition of the cotton crop have
now an interest and significance which
they have hitherto failed to possess. The
general tenor of the reports shows that
labor, both white and black, is plenty
and vastly more efficient this season than
it has been for many years, which argues
good state of feeling between the en-
ployer and employed. The use of COM
mercial fertilizers has been resorted to
more the present season than ever be-
fore, and planters are slowly habituating
themselves to the application of domestic
manures-a practice which is quite new
in that section.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

A YOUNG lady of Portland, Me-, not
long since met handsome Boston COM
mercial drummer on the cars, struck up
an acquaintance, allowed him to visit
her, and finally consented to be his wife.
She afterward repented of her hasty
promise and wrote him to release her,
but he wouldn't. She has now received
q letter from a Boston lawyer, stating
that her was-to-be husband had retained
him as counsel, and that unless the mar
riage takes place at the time set, suit
will be commencedagainst her for breach
of promise. AS the young lady is worth
handsome property, she is afraid the
tenacious drummer's motives are not
sincere, and that she has been very fool
ish to allow herself to get into all this
muddle.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
GRocERs CHEATING in ENGLAND.

In apt adulteration
Our tradesmen now cxult;
They'd kill the English nation,
Both infant and adult.
In trade what lots of trickery!
In ale how little malt!
The coffee's full of chicory,
The beer is full of salt.
Nutrition for the nursery,
For babies plump and arch,
Turns out upon cursory
Inspection to be-starchi
Maizena, and Oswego
Are starch without the blue;
But where the deuce will he go
Who dares such things to dc?
What though man has leda
OF traders of renown?
Even a Moscow medalist
The analyst runs down.
And o how sad to utter
The statement Punch has seen,l
That even best fresh butter
Is made from butterinei
The truthful grocer non est
Alas ! his frauds are gross;
Neither is vintner honest
Nor brewer, inter nos.
If you would wear gray locks on
Brains that with age won't fail,
Grow your own sheep and oxen,
And brew your own good ale.
Punch.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

proftably employ Choctaws, Chickasaws
and Creeks to manage all the wild In
dams of the plains. Every time Sheri-
dan kills an Indian it costs $10,000." -
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
FRESH TOPICS.

COLLEGE rows and rows (spelled the
same but pronounced differently again
prevail in the East.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
Space.

Business cards of five lines or less So per annum.
Local notices 10 cents per line each insertion
Simple eannouneenfcifts- -sf-maFFieges and deaths,
and church and benevolent society notices inserted
free Any additions to obituary notices will bc
charged cents per line.
Favors MUST be handed in early as Tuesday
morning to insure insertion the same week
Communications upon subjects of general or 10
cal interest are solicited.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24
General.

After thirteen years and repeated fruitless
efforts the iron safe of the United States man
of-war Cumberland, which was sunk i'll 1amp-
ton Roads by the Rebel ram Virginia, in 1862,
has been recovered by a party of divers. The
safe is supposed to contain about 100000 in
gold, which will go to the lucky finders,
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

THE most singularly-named man in
New York is Walter r. T. Jones-the
middle initials standing for Restored
Twice. His parents first had son called
Walter, who died. Another boy was
born to them, and christened after the
first, with an addition, Walter Restored.
He died, and third male child was born,
and received the name he now bears,
Walter Restored Twice Jones.
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

Mrs. NOODLES, of Wausau, Wiscon-
sin, presented her husband with triplets.
OF course they are very poor, and MIR.
Noodles. is said to be worthless vaga-
bond. The question now is, does
Noodles deserve pension?
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

SUSAN B. ANTHONY has been an un-
tiring attendant at the bedside of her
brother, d. R. Anthony, of. Leayen-
worth, during his illness resulting from
Embry's pistol-shot and if the wounded
man RECEIVERS, it will be due largely to
Miss Anthony's skill and attention.
Every particle of food eaten by the Col
onel was prepared by her hands, and for
the time, at least, the strong-minded
woman was merged in the loving sister.
THE "balloon wedding" has been out
done by the proprietors of variety show
In San Francisco. 1t was announced on
the bills few days since that one Of the
varieties" of the evening would be an
actual wedding with real minister; and
the programme was carried outaccord-
ing to the contract, the parties being q
favorite clog dancer and the leading
vocalist of the troupe. After the cere-
mony the happy pair expressed their ap-
probation of the applause bestowed on
them by combined song and dance.
DURING the recent visit of the Illinois
editors to st. Louis, they called upon
Gen. Sherman in a body and passed q
few pleasant words. Phelps, Of the
Wyoming Post, who was of the party,
says that few of them fingered after the
main body had departed, and proceeded
to interrogate old Tecumseh about his
book. His characteristic reply to a
question was, 81 think I wrote the
truth, but if you think differently, after
carefully reading the book, you ought to
give me -"
The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-06-24

.-rss-r II 2
- An atrocious murder was committed at Salem
rutherford county, Tenn, last week.. Vim. JAR
riett returned home from a visit and found his
wife lying dead on tic floor with acord drawn
tightly around her throat. 1t is thought money
was the object of the murder, as some was
found missing,
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29

A LOCOMOTIVE WITH LEGs.-At the sit
ting of the Academy of Science in Paris, M.
Tresca exhibited model of locomotive en-
CINE now being tried on the Eastern Railway.
This engine has no wheels, but what may be-
called le egs. It does not roll it walks, runs;
or gallops. 1t is like an ordinary railway en-.
CINE, with straight rods terminating in broad
circular skates. There are three legs in front
and three behind. The moving cylinders, in
stead of turning wheels, raise the feet. and the
whole acts something after the fashion of
three-legged horse. The invention is espe-
cially adapted for carrying of great weights
up all incline. The engine at work on the
Eastern Railway weighs ten tons, and goes
seven or eight kilometsrs an hour-about six
tenths of a mile-and can accomplish if desir-
ed, twenty kilometers. Ofcourse this style of
locomotive is not likely to displace the one
now in use, but it is especially applicable to-.
mountain railways, and is a step in new di-
rection. The model exhibited at the Acade-
my of Science ascended an incline of twenty
five degrees with ease.-Paris paper.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
The Mprkpille Gnqnirer.
YORkVLLE, S. c.:
THURSDAY MORNING, JULY 90, 1875.

Howto Order the Enquirer.-Wrte the name
of the subscriber very plainly, give post office,
county and State in full, and send the amount OF
the subscription by draft post-otfice money
order, or enclose the money in registered letter.
Postage.-The ENQUIRER is delivered free OF
postage to all subscribers residing in York coun-
ty who receive the paper ut post-otlices within the
county; and to all other subscribers the postage
is paid by the publisher. Our subscribers, no
matter where they receive tho paper, are not liza
BILE for postage it being prepaid at the post-oifcc
here, without additional charge to the subscriber.
Watch the Figures.-Thc ddte on the "address-
label" shows the time to which the subscription is
paid. If subscribers do not wish their papers dis
continued, the date mast be kept IN ddranre.
Cash.-It must he distinctly understood that
our terms for subscription, advertising and job
work. are cash in advance
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
Iiie sup uuueIgoinS repairs.
STRUCK BY LIGHTNING

On Friday afternoon, during the prevalence
of thunder storm, lightning struck near the
residence of Mr.. Hobbs on the northern side
of town, shivering two oak trees which stand
about one hundred yards apart in line dag
onally across Mr.. Hobbs lot. The space be-
tween the trees is open, and the line of the
electric current is but short distance from
his residence. An oxen belonging to Robert
Wright had sought shelter under one of the
trees, and was killed. One of its ears was cut
off as smoothly as if it had been done with a
sharp knife. Several persons in the vicinity
of the spot were shocked, but none were seri-
ously hurt
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
SOUTH CAROLINA NEWS.


There has been no rain at Beaufort for
more than month.
Watermelons are so very abundant in
Charleston that they were sold last week for
three cents each.
Rev. A. M. shipp, formerly President of
Wofford College, has removed to Nashville,
Tennessee.
The blacksmith shop on the plantation of
j. B. Erwin, Esq, of Lancaster, was Destroy
ed by fire on last Saturday night.
The new dwelling g-house not yet compile
ted, of Maj. E. M. Mills, near Blackstocks,
was blown down during the storm of Monday
evening of last week,
w. w. Peake, of Winnsboro, has been
appointed route agent on the Airline Rail-
road, vice Adam Crews, transferred to the
Charlotte Columbia and Augusta Road.
- On Tuesday night last, a difficulty occur
red on the plantation of T. S. Brice, in Fair
field county, when one of the parties, Adam
Wood, was seriously cut with knife, and
the other, Calvin Douglass, mortally wound
ed with gun shot.
- The difficulty heretofore existing between
the South Carolina Railroad and connecting
lines in regard to equitable rates for through
and local freight on the different roads, has
been temporarily adjusted by the various Of
ficers, in convention at Atlanta.
-Juge Maher has decided that the dlstrl-
button of the school fund is entirely under
the control and management Of the school
commissioners, and that the county commits
sioners have nothing to do with it. Judge
Cooke has decided just the other way.
- The number and kind of vessels which
have passed in and out of Port Royal during
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29

showed considerable notification, and laid
the blame upon bystander, who at the crit
ical moment, sneezed loudly. The next at
tempt, however, was an entire success. The
old man declined any further trials of his skill,
and when offered sum of money to repeat
his first feat of shooting potato from his
sons hand he refused, saying that he didn't
care to try such experiments unless his weapon
was freshly cleaned.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
RAILROAD ACCIDENT,

On Saturday morning last, the train from
Yorkville to Chester, when about six miles
from this place, ran off the track. The acci-
dent was the result of defective "chair," by
which detection the rails it connected had
spread. The train ran some distance over the
cross-ties, and was only stopped by the front
wheels of the locomotive dropping into
trench across the track. In consequence Of
the shock thus received, the locomotive was
damaged to the extent of about $500. It is
now in the shop undergoing repairs
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29

ny" For several days there has been some
agitation in the breadstuff market and a
marked advance in prices One of the causes
assigned for the advance is the recent destruc-
tive floods in Europe, whereby the grain crops
we're seriously injured. 1t is also thought
that spectators are aiming to push prices to
an extravagant pitch.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
LOCAL AFFAIRS.
NEW ADVERTISEMENTs.

J. Leander Adams, -Notice-Bar-
gains-Hats-Boots and Shoes-ClOthing-
Dress Goods Cassimeres-H Hardware.
r. w. ClawsOn-Red Rust Proof Oats for Sale
Gin and Horse Power.
H. F. Adickes-More Rare Bargains-Summer
Shdwls.
Yorkville Furniture Store-Another Great Ex
element.
w. H. & J. P. Herndon-Our Stock is Complete
Tin Ware Wooden Ware-Pot Ware.
r. NJ. Dobson Il Co.-I.ace Bibles-Roll
Hinges-Ready- Made Shirts-Miles Shoes
Table Linen--R Rim -Bargains-Dr
misunderstanding -CalicOes-Ready-
Made Clothing Rleached Shirting-Lawns.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
KINGS MOUNTAIN SCHOOL FLAG.

KINGS MOUNIAIN SCHOOL TLAU.
We were mistaken last week, in stating that
Col Coward, Principal of the Kings Noun
tain Military School, intended to raise Uni.
ted States flag on the grounds of his institu-
ton. Instead of that standard, he has run
to the breeze the old Moultrie flag, which
was used before the present National ensign
was adopted. The flag is of blue bunting, 10
feet by 20 in the centre Palmetto Tree,
with the letters *. NJ is" and in the up
per corner white crescent. On National
holidays a streamer of United States colors
will also be foated on the same staff
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29
CITIZENS, SAVINGS BANK.

We learn that dividend of tep per cent
will be paid to the creditors of the above in.
stitution about the lst of August, by the trus-
tee, DR.. Fisher. The Sumter Southron is in
formed that the trustee hopes to be able to
pay 10 or IL! per cent. more; which will make
total of go per cent on the indebtedness of
the bank to depositors and other creditors.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-07-29

Steamships, 159; steamboats,, 25O; schooners,
1856; barks, 107; ships, II; brigs, 4S; and
sloops, 1856; making a total of 1896 vessels.
Mr.. Edward Zimmerman, of Greenville,
while taking the bride from his horse some
days since, was rendered insensible by a
stroke of lightning, which set fire to his stable
and killed his horse. Stable and contents
were entirely consumed, and, but for the time
ly assistance given by his wife, Mr.. Zimmer-
man would have been burned to DEATH