River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1875-05-14
ODDS AND ENDS.

waiting for the potatoes to grow.
The Toledo Blade says: st. T. stands
on the ragged edge Of an enormous ABYSS
Terrapin Tower, We mean, which has
been rebuilt at Niagara Falls
A. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS, trying to say
his subject twas hardly able TO bear the
demise OF his wife, was made by the IN.
eXOrable printer to say, swear the chem.
Use of his wife"
Sergeant Bates don't swear; we only
wish to mention the fact that he is alive,
and that he proposes to start from Wind.
sor, Ontario, on May l7th, to carry the
stars and stripes uniurled to Toronto.
Unless a Milwaukee girl, says an enyi-
Gus Chicago scribe, can take brick in
each hand and make eight feet and four
inches at standing jump, she rarely
gets admitted into the best society.
AT a spelling match in Detroit the
other day the word "moten" was gwen
to young woman and she spelled it
"M.o-u-l-t-o-n." That shows what she
has been reading for the past few months.
An Atchison, Kansas, girl ate four
pounds OF wedding cake in order that she
might dream of her future husband. And
now she says that money wouldn't hire
her to marry the man she saw in that
dream
Poor James w. Nye, once Governor of
Nevada and then Senator of the United
States, genial and witty, and then seem.
ing favorite of fortune, IS now an inmate
of an insane asylum, aud classed among
the incurables.
A cOlored congregation in Dayton have
decided to forgive their clergyman for
betting on three-card monte and losing
100 Of festival money. One Of the dea
cons remarked I'VE is all human, an
de game is VERY exciting.
Eli G. Grimes, who killed Col. William
Parker White, aud who has sworn that
ex-COngressman Bowen, of South Caro-
lima, hired him to do the murder, is held
as witness, in Columbia, against Bowen,
who is to be tried for the murder.
There is great excitement at Exeter, N.
H., and vicinity, over the discovery of
rich silver and lead deposits on the farm
Of Asa Brown, at Raymond. party at
Portsmouth has bought part of the farm,
and is working it, and negotiations are
pending for the sale of the rest.
William Lorell, of New York, proposes
to trot American Girl against 0ccident, a
race Of mile heats, best three in five, in
harness, for $4,000 or $4,000 side, in
Philadelphia, over Point Breeze Park, or
in New York. over either Fleetwood or
Prospect Park; good day and good
track; the race to take place any time
from date to LIST of June, 1875.
A Nevada woman recently knocked
down seven burglars one after another.
Her husband watched her from the top
OF the stairs, and felt so brimful of battle
that he couldn't cool off until he had
jerked his eght-year-old boy out Of bed
and "whaled" him soundly for not get.
ting up and helping his mother.
'Ph9be Couzins doesn't dress like her
brothers at the bar" says the Chicago
Tribune, by way Of commencing an item.
THAT undoubtedly true" says the
Brooklyn Union ''she dresses by put
ting on her clothes over her head, while
they don't, and, what's more, they can't.
But what business is it of the Tribune S
anyhow :"
Notorious as a reader Of his sermons, a
reverend gentleman, in bantering a ma
son, one of his Pensioners, OH the supe-
rior stability OF ancient compared with
modern buildings, put the question, Can
yoy tell me when the masons lost the art
of temperiag their mortar }" ''I've
heard, said the man, with a sly leer
that it was about the time that minis
tiers lost the gift ofextempore preaching.
His wife was "very sound-far more so
than most women" A healthy wife is
indeed one Of Gods blessings. Physical
vigor in women always carries heap OF
moral force. When a strong, firmly
knit, sinewy married female gets up, and
in an unmistakable tone of voice, ejacu-
lates "James !" James doesn't have to
go foOling around among his neighbors to
find out what she means.
''The Rev. Mr.. Glendening, Of unhappy
notoriety," says the New York Herald of
the Sd, preached yesterday in the church
at Jersey City from which he was sus-
pended by the Presbytery. The death of
poor Mary Pomeroy did not seem to af.
feet the reverend gentleman, though some
trouble was feared from the Indignation
Of the citizens. lie is now in open def
ance to his church as well as to the COM
muni.y."
A man in Nebraska, who dropped two
cents worth of mail matter in the post
office box, and had TO pay six cents to do
II, went over and stood by one Of the
windows, and said: ",Iay Hannibal
Hamlin, of Maine, and Alexander Ram.
Sey, Of Minnesota, have the bilious cole,
the ague, the govt, the iaundice, cOrns,
bunionS. boils and the buckwheat scratch.
es from this day noon for the next fifty
years TO come.
clair gettin' little thin, sir" said
the barber. "Young man." said John
Henry, looking down upon him from the
height of a solemn experience; "young
man, when you are married YOU will
never allude, in that thoughtlesS manner
TO domestic Affections. No; don't apol.
ogize. My feelings are bluntcd. hut
Is there not some mysterious unguent -
some soft, seductive compound that
makes the hair more slippery to the
grasp!"
The son Of an old Scotch Clergyman
having married without his fathers ap.