The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1875-05-20
CONCERNING CORNS.
A QUACK PATRIOT.

A QUACK PATRIOT.
THE MODEST CLAIM OF AN UNAssUMING CORN
DOCTOR FOR SERVICE RENDERED AS OFF,
CIAL EXCREsCENCE EXTERNINAToR OF THE
ARMY IN THE TINES THAT TRIED MEMS
SOLES.
The Cincinnati Commercial editorially
ssys: Among the petitions presented to the
committee of war claims, near the close of
the first session of the Forty-third Congress.
was that of DIR. Issachor Zacharie, by pro-
fession a chiropodist, and, in 1862, praticing
his profession in the city of New York. DIR.
Zscharie, troubled by the apparent immo.
bility ofthe Army of the Pot) mac, he I'M
Outstanding by practice aud experience,
that the most serious impeachment to the ac-
tive movements OF the human economy are
corns and bunions, periodically determined
to dedicate his services to the Army of the
Union. Applying at the executive mansion
he was furnished with the following letter,
and it was doubtless due to Mr. Lincoln's de-
light marching order, that the letter was
written:
EXECUTIVE MANSION,
WASHINGTON, ID. c., Sept. %, 1862.
From numerous testimonials of the high
est character, and from personal experience,
we approve the very great success of DIR. ].
Zacharie in operating upon corns, bunions
Simultaneous relief is afforded, and we desire
that the soldiers OF our brave army have the
benefit of the doctors surprising skill.
A. LINCOLN,
VIM. III. SEWARD.
In pursuance of this letter, the secretary
of war, who was as impatient as Mr.. Lincoln
or Mr.. Seward to
PUT THE BOYS ON A GOOD FOOTING,
issued the following order;
'WAR DEPARTMENT,
WASHINGTON, ID. c., Sept. "a, 1862.
''Dr. L Zschsrie has permission to pass
within the line of the United States forces
around Washington and on the Potomac,
for the purpose of operating upon the feet OF
the soldiers for corns, bunions, etc.; this
pass to continue for 80 DAYS.
EDWIN NJ. STANTON.
Continued for 60 days, by order of Gen.
Tucker Blake, assistant secretary Of war.
Signed November 81, 1922
With these documents in his pocket, DIR.
Zacharie proceeded at once to Fortress Mon
roe, when, according to the statement of his
petition, he operated on the feet of not less
than five thousand soldiers under command
of General John A. Dix, and to the great re-
lief of the soldiers and the entire satisfac-
ton of ne general commanding Having
eXtirpated these enemies OF an effective
army in that quarter, he next proceeded TO
New Orleans, where General Banks was then
in command. Here the bony excrescences
of 5000 bold so9er boys were removed, and
they were prepared for the Red River cam
paign. Thence be returned to Washington,
and moved from camp to camp about the
capital and Baltimore and other points con-
tiguous, where troops were stationed, and
1000 more volunteers were able to rise up
and bless DR.. Zacharie. This remarkable
chiropodist claims to have relieved not less
than Is, 900 soldiers of the cutaneous obsta-
Giles to effective duty in the field
BE ASKED NO CONVERSATION
then. He had done his part toward the
stamping out of the rebellion. He literally
furnished fifteen thousand stamps that
otherwise might have been put in hospitals
to hobble about on clutches, consuming
rations, hospital stores, and doing no duty
at the front. It was modest in the patriotic
valuable services. He waited until
the war was over, the negroes freed
and habilitated as citizens, the work of |
reconstruction about completed and,
the national debt in process of reduction.
And then he applied to congress for compen- |
sation at the rate of three dollars per soldier,
or $4,000 in all. Upon this petition Mr..
Kellogg, from the committee on war claims, |
made report. We regret to observe in this |
report, which is adverse TO the claims OF the |
petitioner, a disposition TO be hippant ana |
facetious. Has Mr.. Kellogg no corns, hath |
no bupion made tender his regard for |
the pedal extremity? Does he know /
what it is TO have No. II hobnailed |
brogan, supporting a columnar weight of
$50 pounds, suddenly superimposed on Il foot
each toe of which was equipped with an ar
row piercing to the quick? Does he know
what it is to have a Roman
nose constructed on the pedal landscape,
around which the appreciative shoemaker
describes an ellipse of awful proportions
when constructing covering for it? Has /
he ever tried to mitigate its pangs with poul-
tees, or touched its sggrsvating protuber-
ance with iodine till it resembled the fiery /
cone Ola volcano?
allow blessed is the son of woman born
Who never felt the sting OF corn,
Or smarted ike ten thousands onions
With blistering bands and blasted bunions."
The objection that DR.. Zacharie does not
produce the corns and bunions is evidence
of the service rendered, is not well taken.
he could draw from his private collection
doubtless, ample proof OF his professional
skill, and then an inquiry would have to be
made whether they were the actual corns
which impeded the progress OF the armies
in the year 1862. The fact that the armies
moved more rapidly the ensuing year, and
from that time TO the end of the war did
not stay their advance, but marched
through and through the confederacy with
q rapidity of movement that astounded