Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1875-06-19

VI tlllo, ulAl NlOn l. COlllO Oub L
will throw pint of vitriol in his facel"
"You will have no gin where you are
going"
"Oh, indeed !" Ironically.
"Nor shall you participate with the
other prisoners in the usual Christmas
cheer"
Prisoner (mockingly). Is that all9
Good-morning.' A merry Christmas to
you'll"
With which parting compliment she
fourished out of the dock.
The London beggar is troublesome
parsonage. He is oftener plucky than
meek. He argues with the magistrate,
and looks upon his trade as one perse-
cuted by tyrannical laws.
A poor old fellow, wellnigh naked,
was put into the dock for begging.
A sergeant testified that he saw the
prisoner walking along singing, begging,
and trembling, and so arrested him.
Magistrate. "What was he doing ?"
Sergeant. Trembling, sir"
"Was he all alone"
Yes, sir"
Prisoner. "I wasn't trembling for
the purpose. 1t was the cold, sir"
"Well, take care you don't tremble in
company. This time you appear to have
trembled alone; so you are discharged, "
AS he left the court, prisoner was
heard to say, soto voce, that the magis-
trato was every good chap"
Never was the philosophy of cynical
Indifference to fate carried to greater
lengths than by one Dennis Haggerty,
prisoner not long ago summoned to an
swer the charge of picking pockets at
Guidhall. Haggerty did not care to deny
that or any other charge that might be
brought against him. He looked upon
his position as the result of sheer, mex
orable fate E.; nay, he contemplated his
return to similar position in the future
with an eye at once calm and prophetic.
The bench asks him if he has anything
to say why sentence should not be pass
ed upon him.
Nuffen," he replies, doggedly.
The bench calls his attention to the
fact that "nuffen " is not plea recog-
nized by society.
"Well, then, retorts the prisoner,
little tartly, 81 have this yer to say I
sha'n't be honest no more ; its 10 use.
"Do you mean that you shall continue
to steal?"
eyes, that's wot does mean. I can't
get no work. I've tried to get it. A
prig I is, and prig L means to be-"
The prisoner is sterDly sentenced to
hard labor for six weeks.
eyer may make it ten weeks if yer
likes" replies Haggerty. 81 can't do
nothin' but thieve and thieve means
to, whenever 1 gets the chance"
Haggerty clearly does not regard life
in the light of blessing.
Lovers quarrels among the lower or
ders now and then find rather unro-
mantle sequel in the police courts. The
outraged sweetheart of Drury Lane or
Smithtield is not slow to resent abuse by
having her Tom OF Jerry arrested and
charged with assault; but, womanlike,
relents when she finds him really in the
clutches of the law, and seeks to undo
her retributive work.
A "domestic servant of comely
presence thus arraigned her somewhat
violent lover on charge of threats and
assault. She was engaged to him, she
said; but, finding he was not SIRE
spectacle person" broke off the match.
Accidentally meeting her in Islington, he
told her that if she did not walk with
him he would be q wood-demon " to
her. He threatened to knock her down,
and was really SO abusive that she was
forced to call policeman. Brought up
in Clerkenwell court, defendant, in q
very excited state, thus explained the
situation:
/" My lord, I love her too we'll to harm
her. If said one word to hurt her
feelings, am sorry, for [ love her still.
My mamma will stand up and speak for
me. Would wear her likeness; would
L have it set in ring and wear it on
my fnger-oh, 1 have it here!-if I had
not the fondest. most sincere, the most
lovable kindness for her2 Let my NAM
ma speak, my lord"
Whereupon his "mamma" took the
stand, and testified that he was q good
lad, and helped support his brother
and family.
The magistrate said there was no
doubt the defendant was very excitable,
whereonthe latter exclaimed: go my
lord, take my word, / will never harm
hor!" He was bound over to keep the
peace, and the lovers left the court arm
in-arm.
A more elderly swain, in the shoe
making line, was brought up for "will-
fully annoying" a comely widow, who
testified thus
"He processes to be in love with me,
and wants to marry me. He asked me
to forgive him for writing certain letters
to me, and then caught hold of me.
told him to leave, and a friend took me
from him."
Prisoner. "Didn't tell you thai
my intentions were honorable ?"
Widow. "You might have said so"