, 1875-09-05
MR., STACKS STORY.


Some time ago Young man named Stack sent
,nd soy to sha aa A an1 IN Ga
nothlu 6 about it be concluded to call upon thu
| editor. Col Bangs, in ofdar to ascertain Why
that narrative had not attracted attention. When
! Stack mentioned his errand the Colonel reached
for the manuscript, and, looking very solemn. he
I said:
''A1r. Stack. don't think I can accept this
| story. In some respects it ia really wonderful;
| but am afraid that, it puhliah it, it would at
tract almost too much attention. People would
get too wild over it. We have to be careful
For instance, hero in the first Chapter
| you meotion the death Of Mrs. McGin-
mis-, the hero's mother. She dies yor
| inter Mrs McGmnis in thu cemetery yon give
an affecting scene 1t the funeral you run up
| monument over her. and plant honeysnckles
! upon her grave. You create in the readers mind
| a strong Impression that 111s McGinnis is thor
! oughly dead. And yet, over hero in the twenty
| second chapter, you mako q man named Thorup-
| son fall in love With her, and she is marr1ed to
| him, aud she goes skipping around through the
rest OF the story Us lively rs grasshopper, and
| you all the time slluding to- Thompson al her
second husband. You see that kind Of thing
won't do. It excites remark. Readers complain
| about it."
'Thundar, you don't say did that7 WE'LL
| now, do you know was thinking all the time
! that it was in-. ucGinns that buried iu the
d,st chapter! 1mpst have got them mixed up
| somehow."
"And then," continued tho Colonel "when
you introduce the hero. you mention that ha
| has got but one arm, having lost the other in
] battle But III chapter twelve you run him
| through saw-mill BY an accident, and you uaen-
tion that he lost an arn there. too. And yet, IN
tue nineteenth chapter, you say, AdolpL rushed
| up to Mary, threw hs arms about her, ard
elasped her to his boeon,' and then You 20 OF 20
rela.e how ho eat down at the piano, in the soft
moonlight, and played one OF Beetnoven's go
| Dstas with sweet, poetic fervor.' Now. tie
| thing you eee don't hnng. Adolph couldn't
| possibly throw his arms around Mary. il one
] was buried on the field OF battle and the othsl
| was minced up in saw-Inill and lie couldn't
! clasp her to his bosom unless ne throw lassc
with his teeth and hauled her in BY swallowing
! the Elnck Of the rope. As for the piano-wen
| you know as veil 81 do that an armlass man
can't play Beethoventsouata unless be knoNa
how to perform OIL the natrumant with his
nose, aud in that case you insult the popnlax
intelligence when you talk about sweet, poetic
fervor.' have my fingers on the public pulse,
aud know tnsy wont stn1d it,"
"We4 ~el},~ said Stack, ~ don't kuo"
how ever came to-"
''Let me direct your attention to another in.
cendiary matter," INTERRUPTED tho Colonel. "Ix
the first love Ecene between Adolph and-and-
let me SEQ. what's her name-Mary-yoa sa3
that her liquid blue ewes rested softly uppu
him as he poured forth the story Of his loye,
and ita azure was dlmmed by Hood OF happy
tears Well, sir. about twenty pages further
on, where the villain insults her, you observe that
her black ego flashed Lightning at him. anf:
seemed to sco.ch him where he Stood Now let
me direct attention to the fact that, ii the girIs
eyes were blue, then tuey couldn't be black and
Vt you mean to convey the impression that sl4e
had one blue eye and one black eye and thai
Bhe had only looked softly at Adolph out Of the
oil eye, while the near ono roan1ed around, moi
doing anything II particular. why, she il no phe-
nomeual for novel, and only suitable TOR q
place in the 'nenagerie by the side OF ths lat
woman. And then you say tnst. although her
1;ryIi1 vat Grer n3 f}n ioit. Do7-
pie won't put up with that kind OF thing. Il
makes en- delirious and murderoua."
"Too bad, said Stack. '' I forgot what said
about her eyes, when wrote that scene with the
villain"
And here, IN the twentieth chapter, you eay
that Magruder was stabbod with a bowie-knife IN
the hands Of the Spaniard; and in the next
chapter you give an account OF the poss-mortem
examination, and make the doctors hunt for the
bullet ana find it imbadded in his liver. Even
patient readers can't remain calm under such
circumstances They lose control Of them
Selves"
'.It'a unfortunate" said Stack.
"Now ;he way yoH manage the Browns in the
Mrs. Brown as taking her twins around to
church to be christened. In tho middle
OF the book you make 11rs- Brown lament that !
she never had any children, aud sou wind up'l
the story by bringing In Hrs, Brown with her {
grandson in her arms, Just after having caused !
Mr.. Brown to state to tho Clergyman that tho
only child be ever had died In his 4th year. Just
think Of the effect OF such thing OH tho pub i
Tic mind! Why this story would i'll all the in !:
zane asylams in the country"
'.Those Browns don't seem 10 be very definite
somehow" said Stack, thoughtfu1Iy
.'Worst of ALL" said the Colonel. Sin
napte, 81 you make the lovers resolve upon
sGicide, and you put them IN = boat and dt'ft :;
further on vou suddenly introduce them !
walking in tie twilight in leafy 1sne. and !,