Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1875-03-19
HUMOROUS.

! WIT Is . dog like tree! Because both
lose their bark when dead.
j When Comstockcr wants to dispalage
another he saws: ''When you thoroughly
prospect him you'll find no bonanza in
him."
Western editor says that "a child was
run over in the street by a wagon three
years old and cross-eyed with pantalcts on,
which never spoke afterwards"
A Western poet, who had expressed a
wish to die ''amidst the grand solitude of
of eternal nAouata.n topa," was killed by
the explosion Of a pint OF cheap kerosene.
Fontcrelle th..s dsin,ily compliments
the sex when he compares woman and
clocks: 1.-The latter serve 20 point out the
hours, the former to make Us forget them. :"
A woman at Tif1n, Ohio, fell and broke
her arm, but she refused two offers of as
sistance because the men wcle strangers
to her and there was no one around to in
ltroduce them.
"Well, how do you get along?" inquir-
ed country landlord. one rainy MOI ming
|of a guest whom he had put in . top floor
room, under leaky roof. "Oh, swim
|mingly," was the reply.
To avoid notifying her lovers family,
who are very poor. Montreal heiress was
married the other day in plain Swiss
muslin costing $50. while Ter undercloth-
inc ,vaa valnesl nj 40 A0O
A Western paper says: Talk abnut about
wind blowing the grasshoppers away. One
of them faced Mondays gale for an hour.
and then yankei q shingle OF house for
a fan, says it was awfully ,sul,ry"
Ibid you steal the complainaut's coat?'
asked magistrate of secdy indiv,daI
who was arranged before him. Il decline
to crafty the morbid curisity Of the pub
lie BY answering that question: respond
ed the seedy individual, with . glance a
the reporters.
A gentleman playing whist with &C in
innate friend. who seemed. - far as
hands were concerned. to hold the Ma
hoc,ctan doctrine of ablulion in supreme
said to him, with countenance
more IN sorrow than anger. my good fel-
low, if dirt we're trumps, wba, hand you
would have!"
St. Paul's Episcopal Church, Cleveland,
10 one of the very prettiest of its kind in
/ town of the West. The rect0ry former.
" had large and imposing doorplate, IN
scribed 'St. Paul's Parsonage" One day
, wsggish friend of the rector rang the
bell ficrcely and ssked if St. Paul was st
home. The rector enjoyed the joke but |
called for screw-driver Immediately. and
The door plate has since been missing.
A gentleman. walking behind two
school children on Washington avenue.
tho other day. heard the boy inquire:
''Will you be At the party to nights" II
shall be there" answered the Miss, ''hut
might ~ we'll tell you now. that your love |
10 hopelsS mamma is determined; father
10 Get, and i. isn't right for me To encour-
age your attentions. l can be sister 10 |
you, but nothing more. So you needn't
buy me any valentine or. give me any more
gum"
As q Louisville girl vas taking leave Of
/ gentleman u her fathers house one eve
ming. recently, che said to him: If you
ever hear that sm In the habit of allow |
ing my male aeq'ainiAncss 10 kiss me
rood night, you must not believe it. as !
seldom allow such libertiea" The close
u that lnierview may be iaagined.
Very stern parent Ind sed-''Oome here,
Dir! What 10 this complaint thc school
master has made against you!" Much in
juretl youih-'.lts just nothing q tall
You see. Jimmy Hughes bent pin, and
only lsft it on the teacher's chair t0r him
u hDok ~, and he came In without his
specs and sat right DOWN ON tue pin. and
now b blames me for it:"
A printers devil. in swesping up large
collection OF rejected manuAr'pt. bath
psnse end poetry, with . dow scass hook
and blaschsd eAeskA sxclaimed - Aimself
-s'Ohl 1sas. What . ussle of hsatae; ]
sloa't think saall ssse wyile toe the
aswspapsm-exceps am - of the ed
tnea They have ~ beet~e Il - mNstss
-A~es.. aaas, .~iAn SnusSn - snnaae,Sa -