Wilmington daily commercial., 1875-02-12
Engiish school Experience.

RECoILEcTIoNs OF TWENTY-FIVE YEARS AGo-pU-
Pill PRASks on PRECISE scHooLMAsTERA.
tBy olphaut.l
When was boy used to think that school
masters were chiefly sent on earth as a special
inIcton on mankind in general, and boyknd in
particular and. indeed it was no wonder that |
with the rest of my companions, should haze
formed this opinion, for my 4choolmaster was
one of a type very common in those days, and
unhappily not altogether extinct even now.
whose only qualification for his position consist
ed OF petty tyranny, narrow -mndeduess and ip-
)rance and our young minds were not slow IN
perceiving his many absurd eccentricitiea.
One of our greatest sources of amusement was
his frequent and frlitless endeavors to make rs
boys believe thar he the most important
parsonage IN the universe, and when look back
now through the long vista of years that lave
passed away since them cannot lielp thinking
that in the feeling, somewhat akin to contempt
that we felt for linn, our youthful instincts were
undoubtedly in the right direction Al time rolls
away seem to take more and more pleasure in
recurring to, and, in imagination living again
throuSh, those jubant days of my boyhood and
when, from any CAUSE, n feeling of langnor will
at times steal over me can lind no better anti
dote than hearty laugh at my straight laced old
schoOmastcr.
there We're besides the principal, whom we called
the galer, -four assistant MASTERS and well do
remember how We Youngsters had grasped tile
character of each, individually and how we would
vie with each other in -ketching them off To the
lie III carlcature, prose, and song The princi
pal attalnments that my schoomaster imagined
himself in possession of, andprled himself npon
were his purity of dcton his knowledge of good
society, ana his disgust for anything approaching
TO colloqulal language, or local dialect, which
he severally pronounced AZ peyurty OF dhction-
gyude sociyety-colloqueal language and local
diyalect That he was, of all men but n sorry
GNnOnnnt ufx .I,,- 1
well, but to such all extent were these principle
carried by him that he absolutely forbade us to
read any such authors rs Dickens whom he
characterised as "leow fellar'' that must have
been, he said, in ''leow' places to have gained
so extensive knowledge OF ''ColoGueai IAN
guage and local diyalect"
! remember one day that we somehow cot
hold of book in the school that contained the
Following 'It has often been said thar when
man fails through want of intellect shallowness
of mnd and sheer inability III all other walks of
life lie buys penny book of etiquette a birch.
and pair OF spectacles and forthwith tnrnr
Hchoolmaster.' This so tickled our Young fam
cles, and seemed 80 highly appropriate to our
'Safer' that about dozen of III at once eet
abont copying 1t III Il disguised bold round hand
ON large placards and Watching nh opportnnity
we pasted them up all over the walls of the
school room. Shade of ',gylIde socivetv :"
there was a terrible rlction that night and con.
dlgn punishment was threatened to the perpe-
trators OF the ''dlabolcal' outrage, who had
The investigation of this important matter was
lett to the junior assistant Mr.. Poodle, a
young schoolmaster embryo, whose principal
characteristics were an almost lolatrons rever
ence for the opinions of his superior. No Judge
IN sentencing prisoner to Geath could have
made more solemn charge to the prisoner 10
prepare to meet his fate, than our polnpeu-
old 'gaifer " did to his subordinate on tile i'm
portance of the investigation entrusted TO him.
and Mr.. Poodle AZ duly became him, looked the
picture of solemnity accordingly Nothing, how
ever, came to light although Mr.. Poodle was very
Jealous in his masters cause, and never allowed
the question to sleep for many weeks after
wards, and we were not at all surprised to find
that before month had passed away our practi
al joke had become the laugh OF the whole
county 10 the intense modification of nv school
master, whose real name, by the way was Mr.
Wysaker.
Now one of Mr.. Wysakers great fangs was a
burning desire to rush into print in the local
Journals, and in grandiloquent language, Che al
ways carried dictionary in his pocke.) lay down