The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1875-11-25
LOCAL DEPARTMENT.

Money is too plenty.
sausages are ripe.
Fat Turkeys are in demand.
Remember the poor-Printer.
Ottawa has q female barber.
To keep cider sweet-drink it.
Female cloaks are cut very long.
Spare ribs are ready to be picked
Court commences on Monday next,
There will be a grand Masquerade
Ball at the City Hall, on the Both. Go.
Buckwheat cakes and sausage make
good breakfast. Try them.
No potato bugs-no mosquitoes
no fieas-and not happy.
Hot drinks are now ripe and the
dew is Off the rye.
The squeak of the new winter boot
is now heard ON the sidewalk.
Indians, dogs aud national bonds
are not taxed.
So the people prefer soup houses to
good times.
Tan bark bedding for horses, cures
the epizootic.
The trees are now ~lealess aud their
trunks are ready to be checked through
TO spring.
Look up your Insurance Policies
and see that everything is put in or
der. The season for fires has arrived.
Ladies fall hats are now ripe, and a
good many of them have already been
picked.
Just think of ii, We little folks
only four weeks from next Saturday
until Christmas!
To cure h1arseness use the white of
an egg, thoroughly beaten and mixed
with lemon juice and sugar.
Now we have the Champion cracker
eatcr-IIomer LarsI-he eat seven in
a minute. Beat it.
The running time ofour trains have
been materially changed, and if you
don't want to be left, consult the
Tire Table.
The hard times does not seem to af-
feet the matrimonial market in the
least. The boys and girls marry all
the same.
What will the girls, who wear pin
backs, do in slippery wcather?-Just
think ola slip, a fall, a tear, a-ohl
The lady who has a Sc of furs of
last years style should be happy. as
there is no change in the style this
year.
Some folks when they enter the
Office of a newspaper, whistle as if
they were in the middle of corn
field.
A school-master being asked what
'fortiication" meant, replied that two
txentyGcations made one foriifica-
ton.
The ladies will now wear striped
kid gloves. 1t is said that the top
stripe will match that on the stock
imys, but you can't prove it.
Ifyou have a friend with a cough
or cold, tell him TO try DIR. Bulls
Cough Syrup. lie will thank you for
your advice. The price is only %
cents.
There are one hundred and twenty
different patterns for ladies to choose
a winter bonnet from and still they
are not happy
The back seats at church are now
occupied by a large number of young
men. who find it too cold to wait
outside for their sweethearts.
In the changeable weather that is
now upon us it bekooves everybody
TO exercise great caution in the man
ner of apparel and exposure.
The difference just now between
fishes and the girls is that the fishes
are fn-backs, and the girls are pin
backs,
An exchange SAYS: "There are i
473 old liars getting ready to predict
-ahard winter on the strength of musk
rat architecture and the burdock burs
in the cows TAIL"
Almanacs for next year have made
their appearance in great quantities
for the patent medicine men have al
eye to business, and love the "rag mo
ney."
Eaton is blessed with q great man!
persons who profess christianity oil
the Sabbath, but who fail to remem'
Der its teachings the remainder of thu
week.
An exchange has found out that
man never looks so helpless and in
significant as when standing aroun
in a dry goods store waiting for hi
wife to get through trading.
Some people will go two squares t
steal wood that is sawed and NIGEL
split up when there is just as goo
wood on their neighbours pile only
is not sawed and split.
The fields of wheat sown this ia
have a very promising look-aimo'
like meadows i'll spring in their We
nal richness. AS good start is liza
tho battle, We may expect good crol
in 1876.