Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-05-27
Our Small Change.

rels.
Spring has thrown off her buck
skin mittens.
Very hot, now. Yes, thank you
very, very hot.
See notice of Dissolution of CO.
partnership in proper column.
Rev. R. NJ. Webster will deliver
the address on Memorial Day in Ber-
lin.
The hoppers are reported "going
east. We recommend the D. & NJ.
route.
The Danbury Ne,cs Editor 'ss1ip-
ped down on Banana at a Danbury
spelling school.
About 80 in the shade now.
Where is that man who predicted a
freezing summer.
The distillers haven't been seen to
smile since Bristow administered that
vermifuge for their worms.
Secretary Bristow's favorite air !:
''Stilis, so gently DER me Stealing
No0 York Commercial Advertjser,
Anna Dickinson is talking "dry
rot'' to the Chicago folk. Anna
knows what is appropriate to Chicago
audience.
The celebrated pianist, Bulow, it
is said, has been reduced to beggary.
Well, you know, after all, man wants
but little Herr Bulow."
The Nursery for June is received.
If every family of little ones in the
United States bad the Nursery to read
there would be hardly any bad men
and women.
An Orangeman passed through
our streets last Monday with cart
With more nor a dozen bushels in it.
This comes of being city. Don't let
there be riot.
-Shang. Chandler has stepped
down and out from the EIroy Head
Light. Chang needs bell, only when
he comes to a stop; then we all know
by his Scintilations where to look for
him.
We intend a brief sojourn abroad
in about two weeks, and have made ar
rangements with Mr.. VIVA. Jones with
Spafford & Cole to ''IocaIize" for us
during our absence. Billy can do it
we'll we reckon.
"A sporting paper speaks of s'The
Turf Season." We don't know to
what particular season he allvdes, but
probably the present, for it has been
the ''turfest" we've seen for forty-one
years.
1.-THE greatest Pelasgian is Homer;
the great HELEN is Oeschylus the
great Hebrew is Isaiah the great
Briton is Shakespeare; and the great
German is Beethoven. Kari Merz.
And the great American is who ?-Er.
Well, we guess its-Theodore.
The inquisitorial bat maketh the
housewife lively with a thirty cent
broom now-a-nights, and the insinua-
ting hornbug tendeth to his BUSINESS
with commendable asiduity.
We Judge that the editor of the
Tribune would prefer that Harrison
Ludington be not nominated at the
Republican Convention, July 18th.
We only judge so from the puff he
gives MIR. L. in his lest issue. Snch
editorials won't hurt such a man as Dir.
Ludington.
This is what P. T. Barnum told a
Philadelphia audience he would do:
Il will undertake and give bonds
for the fulf|ment of the contract, that
if the city Of Philadelphia will stop
selling liquor and give me as much as
was expended here for liquor last year.
to run the city next year, I viii pay
all the city expenses (pause): no per-
son living within her borders shall pay
taxes (pausc); there shall be no in
surance on property (papsel; a good
dress and suit shall be given to every
poor boy, girl, man and woman
(pause); barrel Of -four shall be
given to every needy and worthy per-
son (Sensationl; and I will clear q
half million Of dollars myself by the
operation Ceres of hurrah)! 1t would
be the best business speculation l was
ever in" Unfortunately they wouldn' t
- - 1o him A. Ro,i.n1in Frank