Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1875-08-19
From the Detroit Free Press.l
The Boy at the Soda Fountain,


He was rinsing the glasses when the
old lady entered the store. It was hot
weather, and the soda fountain looked
so tempting that she conquered her
averice and walked over and told the
boy that she would take a glass.
s'Do yon wish for fly in it?' he
inquired in a whisper.
"a fy p? grashus no !" she replied,
a look of disgust on her face. ,-
''Just as you say, madam he went
on as he drew some lemon syrup
"People are so different in tastes, you
know: Some objects to flies and some
don't I'll mix some pineapple sy rup
with this lemon, and now will you
have a great deal of gas and a little
water, or great deal of water and a
little gasp" --@ .r
'sI'm purity thirsty" she said.
'Well, then you want more water
than gas, and there won't be SO much
danger of an explosion"
"Explosion p she queried.
''That was the word, madam. We
have had but few such accidents here
this summer, and truly hope that we
may have no more"
''Does the soda water blow up
folks ?''
:'That depends upon the state of
their health. Some people could
stand here and drink all day, while
others might get the glass tipped up
this way, and boom! they'd go!'
: -.EEP,cf 2Iy
"Yes'm-fy into a thousand pieces.
You never saw human being explode
did you ?''
"Mercy, no!'
''Well, you don't have the least
warning. They may be laughing or
talking, and all at once the store is
filed with false hair, monogram gar
ters, bustles, corsets, feet, teeth and
rolled plate jewelry. 1t makes great
muss around here, and if we hadn't
three of the smartest negroes in town
to pick mp and sweep out, we'd have to
shut up the store for q whole after
noon after the explosion"
He stood with the glass in his hand
agitating the syrup and waiting, and
she said !:
81 didn't know it was dangerous
stuff. p"
'Well, as 1 told you, it depends on
the state of the system. If your liver
is torpid and your digestion impaired
one glass of soda water would blow
you higher than Gilderoy's kite, and
the coroner would be lucky to find as
much as your spectacles to hold an in
quest on. If your system is all right,
you might drink hundred glasses and
feel ne disastrous effects. Now, then,
you II have a good deal of water and
but little gas, eh p
She made deprecatory motion and
asked:
CLOVIS the stuff made ?''
"Well can't go on and explain all
the process. There's marble dust,
acid, gas, sugar coated pills, giant
powder, cologne water and kerosene
all mixed together and then distilled.
The distilled liquid is placed in re-
tort, where chemical action separates
it, and the gas forces il up separate
pipes - -===--
kerosene and pills %
"That's what said, madam You
look innocent and honest, and hope
you won't say any thing about it.
tend this fountain in order to support
widowed mother and seven father
less children. If you should say
anything I'd be discharged, and if
were discharged l should commit sui
eide. You'll have plenty of water
eh %
mo, sir, 1 WON'T" she replied; ssDc
you suppose I'd drink acids and kero
sene ?"
''Not in their crude state, madam
but this process--"
81 don't care for the process" !" she
snapped ''I wouldn't touch the stuff =!
cit is d mild beverage, madam, and
the doc"
"Well, 1 don't want any. When /
go to swallowing lard and kerosene
you'll know it! S'posen I'd drink
some and it exploded!''
"Don't mention itp' he whispered
"Den't speak of it!''
"I'm sorry for you, young man
/ but there's constable living right in
sight of our house, and I think Il
IL"
"You'l drive me to suicides grav'
you mean"
She lowered her spectacles, took
long look at him, and went out with
out replying.