The Republican journal. [volume] (Belfast, Me.) 1829-current, 1875-12-02
BY OUR GEORGE.


BY OUR GEORGE.
| NEW YORK.
Until the heelcr motor gets into operation
there can be no way that a man can get ava,
from creditor so quickly and easily az by tax
| ing passage in the cars. And then to the Yer
dant man, the man who knows more abou
home than he does of any where else, the ca
is the place where he can find bits of wisdom
laying round thick as feathers in barn yard
after the moulting season. We were standing
outside when the brakeman noticing our intel
leCtual head, asked Us what was our opinion o
the Miller platform: We told him that when
ever we grappled with politics we seemed Il
be cropping round in the dark, going up Il new
street i'll the nighttime without lantern bu
that if Mr.. Millers platform was for hard mon
ey and gradual resumption Of "Gratlua
resumption" said the brakeman q this is tn,
| Miller platform You arc standing on, its safe
guard against accident" and then we felt small
enough to be threaded through the eve of
camb:io needle. Then that brakeman said
Well. suppose you know about the West
| inghouSe brakc:' oh, yes we said w,
heard of their failure; bust up for over mil
| il was not a failure but patent car brake. wv
could not see why Il flash of lightning could no
drop down and destroy lis. Then we went in
/ side and the brakeman came in and took a key
| out Of his pocket, unlocked the stove. put il
some wood and locked the door again. We
asked him What he locked the stove door for
| and he shut up his left eye and said he locke,
the door so the fire coul,3at go out' And thel
we lost all interest in railroads, and devoted
oursclf to shucling out a few peanuts There
is no place over9iiadoWed by the wings Of The
| American eagle where a man weighs 50 little
| rs when he strikes New y DIRK, a perfect strang
or. He don't know where he wants 10 90, non
| how to get there after he starts. II he trusts
to the tender mercie> of Il hatknam, he lint>
| riding in New York rs expensive as eating
canary birds at Delmouro's, and if he under
takes TO 90 alone he gets lost. He gets into Z
horse ear, and after riding an hour finds he has
| taken the wrong ear; he wants to go up a
| street and he finds himself going down. He is
| hungry and drops into Il restaurant, and in nine
eases out of ten happens TO gel into Il French
| on German one. when he would Starve to death
| before he could make them understand what
| American hash is. Fortunately we had years
since atlmmered and wintercd here, and al
| though there We're spots Of rust on our mem
Dry and an occasional hay seed in our hair, YET
| We managed to hunt up a place where we could
refresh the inner man with breakfast, and
| when breakfast is in man, he feels more
| like receiving sealed proposals to run for May.
or ti;n when he is empty. Then we became
| aware that we needed Il shave. We have avery
tender face, as tender parting over the front
| gate. We dread Il barber rs Il barber breads q
| customer with the itch nevertheless three
times each week we beard the barber in hi,
| den. BARRIERS are a species of broker; they are
, always ready TO discount the face OF your note
| They Use a good deal of soft soap, and will
| lahcr their customer, no matter who he is
| FOR % cents you can razor shave on ii small
| piece Of paper. We enter the shop and sit
| down. A small boy hangs up our hat and over
| coat. We take Up Il paper to wait our turn
| The chairs are always full and there are Away,
| three men waiting and all of them are to have
| their hair cut and their whiskers dyed. We
tilillDi ttll WHY lilS IL 50, blll IL Is. AJ
our turn comes and we find The poorest barber
| is the one who is to shave Us. We get into the
chair and are tipped back and the man rub>
! his hand up over our face. apparently forget
| ting in his movements that we are the propric-
| tor of nose. Spreading the apron over Our
lap he tucks towel around oar neck, pinch
ing in small bit of our skin every time he
|
he commences 20 lather, dauGin@ the brush
! across our mouth every time we chance t.
open if. Then lie takes our chin between his
thumb and finger and riibs it till we can feel
the skin peel OF. Then he fathers us some
more. Our skin is now so sensitive that the
I've III the soap begins to take hold. and il slnart>
like Il burn. The razor is now picked out and
sharpencd, and then some friend comes in and
tie barber has 10 stop and converse awhile on
The billiard match. leaving us with the lathcl
on our face, eating into it like a hot gridlle into
4 buckwheat cake. by the time he is ready Il
begin to shave us, the athcr has dried so that
| he has to paint Us another coat. We now tell
him to shave easy, as our face is tender. Civ
| ing eur head a twist sidcwise, he places the
razor under our ear and draws it down oul
cheek to our chin If hot flat iron had slid
| down our face it would not have hurt us more
| Giving us 4 nudge under the chin he tips back
| our head till our neck nearly breaks. Then he
! cuts another sWarth down the side of our neck
and every time a hail is cut OF, Il drop Of blood
| comes out 10 see what the matter is. Then lie
stretches the skin across our cnin till it is IL
| tight rs drum head, and when the razor slides
| across, ii feels like pouring pain killer into {;
new ruf. At last we are shaved and our iac.
| feels Is raw rs Il ncW recruit Wetting Il oWe
with bay ram, manufactured out OF Old New
England with drop of bay oil to flavor it, hl
| proceeds to wash OF the remains OF the lather
| Ihc fumes 20 up our nose and choke us. Ii
| gets into our eyes and makes Us cry; but worst
OF all II soahs into every pore of our skin, ant
| feels rs il red hot needle was sticking into
| each one. Then Il dry towel is thrown over
| our face and two hands are placed on it and
| our face is smoothed, and our nostrl$ are stop
| ped up till we are nearly sutloratcd. Then the
| towel is taken oil and we sit up. Our face j,
| dry excepting two or three small spots, jus
| large enough To make lis nervous, but the RESI-
| OF ii Smart5 We do not notice that much
| Then our hair is dressed and while ii is being
done we are told that we can buy Of our arts
| for dollar. bottle OF lavender water that wi.
make our face so tough that we can be shaved
| with Il ease knife and not hurt us. We tell hin
| if he would deliver il barrel of his wash at oul
| door free OF charge, that we would not let him
| roll II IN, and paying our friend twenty cents
we lice from the room working our neck NJ
through our collar as turtle runs his up thro
| his shell. And that is the way we always fee
when Il strange barber Shayes us.