The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1875-05-14
ODDS AND ENDS.

ODDS AND ENDS.
Potato bugs have advanced N far En-,
Is Akron, Ohio, where the eraneers n
d'scomposed at finding them a]read
waiting for the potatoes to grow.
The Toledo Blade saws: "T. r. stand
on the ragged edge Of an enormous abys.
been rebuilt at Niagara Falls
a newsPaper-biographer, trying to sa
MS SUBJECT was hardly able to bear tn
demise of his wife, was made bv the ~
exorable printer to say, wear the chem
ise of his wife, ''''
Sergeant Bates don't swear: We on1
wish to mention the fact that he is al;v:
and that he proposes to start from W;nd
lsor, Ontario, on May .l7th, to carry tn
stars and stripes unfurled to Toronto.
Unless Milwaukee girl, says an envi
GUS Chicago scribe, can take q brick !,
leach hand and make eight feet and foul
inches 1T q stpnding jump, she rarel,
gets admitted into the best society.
At q spelling match in Detroit tn,
other day the word "molten' was give,
to a young woman and she spelled il
''M'o"u'l-t.o'n: That shows what sh,
has been reading for the past few months
An Atchison, Kansas, girl ate fou,
pounds of wedding cake in order that she
might dream Of her future husband. And
now she says that money wouldn't hire
ner to marry the man she saw in that
dream.
Poor James W. Nye, once Governor Of
Nevada and then Senator of the United
States, genial and witty, and then seem.
ing favorite Of fortune, is now an inmate
Of an insane asylum, and classed amone
the incurables.
A colored congregation in Dayton have
decided to forgive their clergyman for
betting on three.card monte and losing
WV OF festival money. One of the dea
cons remarked: eve is all human. An
de game is VERY exciting.'
Eli G. Grimes, who killed Col. William
Parker White, aud who has sworn that
Congressman Bowen, of South Caro-
lima, hired him to do the murder, is held
as witness, in Columbia, against Bowen.
who is to be tried for the murder.
There is great excitement at Exeter, N.
L., and vicinity, over the discovery Of
rich silver and lead deposits on the farm
OF Asa Brown, at Raymond. A party at
Portsmouth has boug ght part of the farm,
and is working it, and negotiations are
pending for tho sale of the rest.
William Lorell, of New York, proposes
to trot American Girl against Occident, a
race Of mile heats, best three in five, in
harness, for $1,000 or $1,000 a side. in
Philadelphia, over Point Breeze Park, or
in New York. over either Fleetwood or
Prospect Park; good day and good
track; the race to take place any time
from date to lst of June, 1875.
A Nevada woman recently knocked
down seven burglars one after another.
Her husband watched her from the top
of the stairs, and felt 50 brimful of battle
that he couldn't cool off until he had
jerked his eight.year-old boy out of bed
and "whaled'' him soundly for not get
ting up and helping his mother.
"Phnbe Couzins doesn't dress like her
brothers at the bar,'' says the Chicago
1ri6atne, by way of commencing an item.
'sThat s undoubtedly true,' says the
Brooklyn Union 'she dresses by put.
ting on her clothes over her head, while
they don't, and, what's more, they can't.
But what business is it of the 7Tibune's
anyhow!''
Notorious as reader of his sermons, a
reverend gentleman, in b&ntering a ma
son, one Of bis Pensioners, on the supe-
rlor stability of ancient compared with
modern buildings, put the question, Can
yoy tell me when the masons lost the art
of temperiag their mortar give
heard" said the man, with sly leer
that it was about the time that minis
ters lost the gift ofextempore preaching.
His wife was livery sound-far more 50
than most women" A healthy wife is
indeed one of Gods blessings. Physical
vigor in women always carries a heap of
moral force. When a strong, firmly
knit, sinewy married female gets up, and
in an unmistakable tone of voice, ejacu-
lates "James!' James doesn't have to
60 fooling around among his neighbors to
find out what she means.
''The Rev. Mr.. Glendening, OF unhappy
notoriety," says the New York Herald Of
the Sd, "preached yesterday in the church
at Jersey City from which he was sus.
pended by the Presbytery. The death of
poor Mary Pomeroy did not seem to af.
feet the reverend gentleman, though some
trouble was feared from the indignation
Of the citizens. He is now in open def
ancc to his church as we'll as to the COM
muni*y."
A man in Nebraska, who dropped two
cents worth Of mail matter in the post
office box, and had to pay six cents to do
it. wen: over and stood by one Of the
windows, and said: MAY Hannibal
Hamlin, of Maine, and Alexander Ram.
sey, Of Minnesota, have the bilious collie,
the ague, the gout, the jaundice, corns,
bunions. boils and the buckwheat scratch.
es from this day noon for the next fifty
years to come"
''Hair gettin' = little thin, sir ssid
the barber. ''Young man. said John
Henry, looking down upon him from the
height of solemn experience; *'young
man, when you are married you will
never allude, in that thoughtless manner
to domestic Affections. No; don't apol-
ogize. My feelings are bluntcd. But
is there not some mysterious unguent-|
some soft, seductive compound that
makes the hair more slippery to the
grasp!'
The coming insane asylum keeper to
visitor: "Do you mean that man with
his head bowed, his eyes cast down, and
his lips moving! Oh, yes; he was
spelled down too; but he keeps right Tn
practicinp inst tho cnma 7 hol;Svo bic