, 1875-03-21
HUhIOR.
A psner Of ta1-The assessment dSa-
Common pleas-Please shut tho door,

p.per Of ta1-The assessment hsa
Common pleas-Please shut tho door.
noor re!ation-TelIng IN anecdote badly.
carnets are bought by the yard, and Horn by
The foot.
vete.n ahopkseper says that, although hi,
,,a-ta ara ya;y talkasive during the day.
shav are always ready to shut up At u1gnt
1saac says breakfast-cakes are mob very deer
h,,t tha Transformation OF sex botheId hlls.
;. Dew is doe wheats when first mixed. ana COOK
ing makes dem buck-wheats.
An ;nebria.e precipitated himself down Stair,
and on striking the landing repIoschfutiJ Apos-
trophized himself with; III Soul Isea
a-1yautiu' to come down stairs, WY IN tn1naar
s;5n,t ron sav 40. vou woodeu-headed old fool
an I'd 3 coma with YOU, an showed Jon tho
way ?"
.Ih hadn't chance like some boys," reEna-ssd
man in atreet-car, as he aqulrteo sooaceo-
Juice over the straw "my fathes Was ea9 Poos
to give me an education" Bns, II naa oeea
he" replied lady, as she gathered Up p,t.s nes
my neck trying to-"
Jokv11 to1d Moore II man who had said big
entine cost almost nothing, for on SUNDAY.
said ia. IL alwaTa dine With an old friend, anu
then eat 80 much that it Lasts until meouasoaf:
wnen bur some tripe, which nate nhe tne w
boy, aud which accordingly MAKES ms so a.sa
that cannot est any mora until Sunday aga'u.
-rh,ra :, . foor of f1eshet on the Youghio.
a,env River. PENNSYLVANIA and il the 1oughi'
oebeny River should get en- tear, ana Peope
I;yinr along the sYoughioRhsny should Do
aroyned Pittsburg editor hns hired ma1
to stand beeide each comPosieor 10 tne o1acs aa ~
slowly srell: .Y-o-u-g- -o-g-h-e"n-5.-
Louis Democrat
4 swiss hoatman recently pulled uould-he
snicids ont OF Lake Gsneya- An hour OF sxo
| after the boatman discovered the same MA
banging by the neck to tree, but did not tnte1-
, fera tItls time. The magistrate summoned MN
wh be did not tba 'na esaie.
| had ouly hung himself up to dry.
| Glasgow paper prints the following:
| Mamma, whore do the COWS Get the mlk ::
! aakeh Willie, the grandson OF the one snat
| nrewel 3 peck o malt, looking mp from tne i,
!, foan,ine pan OF milk thai he had been lntensly
regarding Where do you get your tssrs tan.. T -
sho answer After q thoughtful silence, %
aoain broke out DO the cows hare 10 Do
| blrched?'" .,-4
sonethinr which no felle1s can find out
what sort OF Rrammar~ 10 it which compels :
nerson 10 say, IL Ba X four deeK IN one otose,
| hnt won't let him say. - There are :en bog u
,ha garden ?n-Detrol! F>pe Press. "aa5 sol! "
grammar is it which eompes Peas0u as uoat ID; Is
h5-, sar . There cro mouses in the hice -
| Albany Argus.
noor woman went to hsr minister esnnE
him to come and porform the funeta ss1 w ~.
her fonrth husband, he having ofticsated LOT =" M
three who had previously Disappeared f1om "
public yiew Why bndses, aaas,smno NO" nAs - III is.
mighty bad" she replied There Tss nesss ;ss -
| NOR woman worn down as With such lot ot
| dying men al I've been.
.When I was travelling In Massachneesaai ~
J some twenty years ago, said tshveiet+ = tba
i scat with the driver, who. on stopping :. ~. ss
post-ofice, salured an Il-ooKlng tonoS ~
hone you're we'll, sir p After leaving the o'ase.
asked the driver if the man he spoke 70 ,1s "
really Judge. Certainly. slr, ha 1opn.a, ,a.d.
I'VE had cock-fght last week, and no "ss :a@s''
| judge on TINT occasion
: Ata fisherman's feast In an Ulster soapoEs.
gentleman VAS seated next 20 an w s.,sd
uron having soma Of every kind OF fooo ~ nss
. vas on the table put altogether upon his p'asa
which was thus loaded With an incong1ooas 1'1. -.
OF fish. flesh fowl and Tegetab!es AZ n tnn
d hea3. The gentleman asked his oeiSaop. =. hes
he did this, and suggested that it would g s pss
+ ter Tor him to eat the different sorts 81 tooo esp
u xrataiy. But the son Of Neptune saT no nesT y
:. | aity Tor any such distinction. He SAC: ~,
you think Keep separate shelves for mem Hsr'
e below? Let them all 60 into me ho!o 'os''1'''
l a.
nMr. Bergh can send man to 1sn to1 kso ~,
p monthe for killing mad cat. we'd hko % -, ~
:: what he can do to = boy who feeds mafo'e8""'
parrot
y "Do YOU want to kill the child? 2. s1cism, srt
ID a gentleman as he saw hoy tip the oaoJ ~
~ its carriage on the walk !" No, not qulse. W
piled tho s Gy Ike es3e sa Of 5 san aSe 81
in the ditch with Johnny B1acer!" -
-. / An sred co}ored individual stepped n'p /
sto1e on Woodward avenue. and asxoo ~" -
!th tharnometer stood IA hundred snd 1o1'!." XII
IN deerees below zero |" replied ons OF sna ~
f. dat fix Z" exclaimed the old u1an ~ ~
rs I've Tossed =2. I iist made bet Il WEI '4N
~ d1ed an fifty"
he After ieavinG jefferson avenue 1,lsu h .e.
yesterday citizen snad ran n 1na noksa around o.
M. Noor and asked: did any one see !e1se,,,
N7 mnnrn1ne envelope ?" Ali answered "ha ;.
,th ho continued: tWe1l it's no g1est !oes t+n,i a
!. I'd like to be sure whethar it SAID tnat "s
n: ens William or my uncle James WAS oeao@ .
4 lover Of good coffee, who had eesn 1a' sra ..s,
grocery Yesterday, and. holding up naoo1u' :.
sst- ground coffee from the big cao. lnann:IN s:No
co, sts, there any beans il this codeex ~ A.
'~ promptly repEed the grocaI. nd
nth kaow ?" asked the man, y. '.Beconse ~ -" ,ns,
cts, beans and had to put peas IN was W.
and MacoHo-atteos "e as',a ~ and eha x1G
3r1l- otner evening 70 ~ ~ e ss!.n,t = tall to-
hurry back with that paTeEoflcs cs,,do1 fopbs bs,s
ling ;one half an hour:" Well cou.aaa aotn nj {
Tenlied the boy. There uas chsp oosld ~ !
witt shn raa gong to lick Billy Smith, ana {. J
At I e"olos An1 49,, 49, aad wn,,{d want 70
and / uaous' nuo naem sAA '''~
Park In the Office Of ono OF the hotels rem ~
yen. xeutlcnan snapped his finger to - oohs,I bs
III md aa he pu. his foot Gu the ! hoa. + ~ ~
''Yon look like good smart bog: IN a b
urct ,uistor - rel!iet; the boy IL ko rose w.
Wit N either haad. stI4fe bad that gan's be' :
ne . dozen TINES, aud now I Tsnt s.t - =, =
hcthar this is cash shine Or NaasasI sas nj, I
ve ;oing to pat NC on tho head when e, ,f,et
"en ,.nd tel{ mo tcat I'll be Gore:noz u e1.'