Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1875-02-03
The Watch and the Turkey.

As certain learned Judge in Mexico,
some time since, walked one morning into
court, he thought he would see whether he
was in time for business +; and feeling for his
repeater, he found it was not in his pocket
"As usual" said he to a friend who was
with him, as he passed through the crowd
near the door, "as usual, have left my watch
at home under my pillow
lie went on the bench, aud thought no
more of it. The court adjourned, and he re-
turned home. AS soon as he wa. quietly
seated in his parlor he bethought him OF his
watch, and turning to his wife he asked her
TO send for it to their chamber.
" But my dear judge" said she, 81 sent il
to you three hours agol"
" "Sent it to me- my dear? Certainly not"
Certainly" replied the lady " and by the
person YOU sent for it."
"The person ! sent fori !" echoed the Judge.
"Precisely, my dear; the very person you
sent for It. You had not left home more
than AN hour when a well-dressed man knock
ed at the door and asked to see me. lie
brought one Of the finest turkeys evey saw,
and said that ON your way TO court you met
an Indian with a number of fowls, and hay
ing bought this one at quite bargain, you
had given him couple Of reals to bring 1t
home, with the request that would have il
killed, picked, and put to cool, as you intend
ed 10 invite your brother judges to dine with
you tomorrow. And Oh by the way, Seno-
rita said he, his excellency the judge re-
quested me TO ask you TO give yourself the
trouble 10 10 TO your chamber and take his
watch from under the pillow, where he says
he left it as usual this morning, and send it
to him by me- And of course did So"
- YOu did 2" said tho iufUa
" Certainly" said the lady.
"Well," replied his honor, "all | can say
TO you, my dear, is that you are as great a
goose as the bird is a turkey. You've been
robbed, madam. Tho man was thief
never sent for my watch. You've been i'm
posed on, and the watch is lost foreverw
The trick was cunning one, and after n
laugh and the restoration of the judges good
humor by good dinner, IL was resolved act.
ually TO have the turkey for to-morrow's din
ner aud TO have his honor's brothers Of the
bench to enjoy so dear morsel. Accord
ingly, after the adjournment of the court
next day, they all repaired to his dwelling,
with appetites sharpened by the expectation
of a rare repast. Scarcely had they entered
and exchanged the ordinary salutations,
when the lady broke forth with congratua-
tions upon the recovery of his stolen watch
How happy am |" exclaimed she, "that
the villain was apprehended-'
"Apprehended" said the judge, surprised.
Yes, and doubtless convicted, too, by this
time" said the WIFE
"You are always talking riddles" replied
he "explain yourself, my dear. | know
nothing of thief, watch OF conviction"
at can't be possible that l have been
again deceived, said the lady; "but this is
the story About one o'clock to-day pale
and rather interesting young gentleman,
dressed in u seedy suit Of black, came TO the
house in great hasts--almost out Of breath.
lie said he was just from court that he was
one of the clerks that the great villain who
had had the audacity TO steal your honor's
watch had just been arrested that the eyi,
dence was nearly perfect to convict him
and all that was required TO complete II wat
the turkey, which must be brought into
court, and for that he had been sent with 1
porter by your express orders"
"knd you gave it to him2"
"0f course did. Who could have doubt.
ed him, or resisted the orders Of q Judge? 2"
swatch and turkey-both gone Pray,
madam, what are we 10 do for dinner I"
But the lady had taken care of her guests,
Notwithstanding her simplicity, and the party
enjoyed both the joke and their dinner.