Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1875-05-06
NOW MIR. COFFIN SPELLED lit.

The other evening old Mr.. and Mrs.
Coffin, who live on Brush street, sat in
their cosy back parlor, he reading his
paper and she knitting, and the family
cat stretched out under the stove, and
sighed and felt sorry for cats not so well
fixed. 1t was happy, contented house
hold, and there was love in his heart as
Mr.. Coffin put down his newspaper and
remarked:
81 see that the whole country is be-
coming excited about spelling schools. "
"Wen, it's good to know how to
spell" replied the wife. 81 didn't have
the chance some girls had, but l pride
myself that ] can spell almost any word
that comes along"
"I'll see about that" he laughed;
come, now, spell buggy"
"Humph! that's nothing-b-u-g-g-y,
buggy" she replied.
reared, slapping his leg.
"Not much-that was right"
cit was, eh9 Well, I'd like to see
anybody get two g's in buggy, I would. "
"But it is spelled with two g's, and
any school-boy will tell You so, she per
sisted.
swell, l know a durn sight better
than that =" he exclaimed, striking the
table with his fist.
81 don't care what you know" she
squeaked; CT know that there is two g's
in buggy y"
EDO you mean to tell me that I've for
gotten how to spell?" he asked.
SIT looks that way
sit does, ehl Well, / want you and
all your relations to understand that 1
know more about spelling than the
whole caboodle of you strung on a
wire."
"And 1 want you to understand,
Jonathan Coffin, that you are an ignorant
old blockhead, when you don't put two
g's in the word buggy-yes you arel"
Don't talk that way to me +" he
warned.
"And don't shake your fist at me ="
she replied.
"Who's a-shaking his fist? p
"You were"
"That's q le-an Internal lie,''
"Don't call me a liar, you old bazaar !!
I've put up with your meanness for forty
years past, but don't call me liar, and
don't lay hand on me!''
"Do you want divorce !" he shouted,
springing up; "you can go now, this
minute,"
Don't spit IN my face-don't you
dare do it, or I'll make dead man of
you :" she warned.
81 haven't spit in your freckled old
visage yet, but may if you provoke me
farther"
"Who's got freckled face, you old
turkey-buzzard?"
That was a little too much. He made
a motion as if he would strike, and she
seized him by the neck-tie. Then he
reached out and grabbed her right ear,
and tried to lift her off her feet, but she
twisted up ON the neck-tie until his
tongue ran out.
"Let go of me, you old fiend :" she
screamed.
"Git down on yer knees, AMI beg
my pardon, you old wildcat! he re-
piled.
They surged and swayed and struggled
and the peaceful cat was struck by the
overturning table and had her back
broken, while the clock fell down and
the pictures danced around. The woman
finally shut her husbands supply of air
off and Topped him, and as she bumped
his head up end down on the floor and
scattered his gray hairs she shouted:
"You want to get up another spelling
school with me, don't your
He was seen imping around the yard
yesterday, stocking pinned around his
throat, and she had court-plaster ON her
nose and one finger tied up. He wore
the look of martyr, while she had the
bearing of victor, and from this time
out ''buggy" viii be spelled with two
g's in that house. Detroit Free Press.
THE FIGHTING EDITOR
We hav, a1dad n MON 70 o,,r otoff