The St. Cloud journal. [volume] (St. Cloud, Minn.) 1866-1876, 1875-08-12
JOAx
-Jis sweet to wait, but oh how bitter,
To walt for girl and then not git ,er.n

MI paper, kuss yeW?' he doesn't feel
half as badly as if the writer had put
his words in straight English.
A Maine girl left her clothing in
an open boat and hid herself, and
when her parents were crying and
saying if they only had her back they
would obey her slightest wish, she ap-
peared and said she wanted to marry
George.
-Mistress-"Let you 60 to even
ing school, Mary? Why, I thought
you could readw "Well, ma'am, I
does know my letters fus rate so longs
they keep all in a row, but just as
soon as they gifts mixed up into words,
I'm beat"
Little Alice was crying bitterly,
and on being questioned confessed to
having received slap from one of
her playfellows. "You should have
returned it, unwisely said the ques-
toner. "Oh, I returned it before"
said the little girl.
"A certain young gentleman of
Evanston, Ind, recently accompanied
a young lady to a train to see her
safely started on her journey. He
carried her railroad ticket in his
pocket for safety, and found it there,
when he reached home, some hours
after the train left.
"A Boston editor blushes for the
ignorance of three young girls of that
city who tried to get their horses
head down so that it could drink by
unbuckling the crupper. Probably
the same girls who unbuckled the
breeching strap, going down hill be-
cause it pulled against the poor horse
so.
"A downtown resident wants
partner in the pie-plant business. 1t
takes four pounds of sugar to one
pound Of pie-plant. He wants the
partner to furnish the sugar, he being
willing to furnish the plant and di-
vide the proceeds half and half: A
fine opportunity for poor man who
can't afford to have pies on Sunday, to
get them cheap.
! SO Young, too!-Fitzbrown: 81
suppose you found Wales and the
lake scenery very charmingf'
American Young Lady: "Oh! pref
II fair, you know, but very small af-
ter our magnificent mountains and
gigantic waterfall and our coun-
try is SO much younger than yours,
too-hardly century old yet, Mr..
Fitzbrown."-Puneh.
In an English Sunday school,
the wears daughter, who was very
proud Of her Bible class, on enquir-
ing of one of her pupils how Queen
Sheba came to Solomon, received the
reply, "By railway, Miss" On asking
for an explanation she received the
answer: because, Miss, the Bible
says she came to Jerusalem with a
very heavy train.''
-Very.stern parent indeed Gone
here, sir! What is this complaint the
sehoolmaster has made against you?"
Much injured youth-"It's just moth
ing at all. You see, Jenny Hughes
bent a pin and only just left it on
the teachers chair for him to look at,
and he came in without his specs and
sat right down on the pin, and now
he wants to blame me for it."
i Yesterday when a woman STEP
ped aboard a Michigan-ave. car the
driver started up and caused her to
sit down on the floor instead of the
seat. II am very sorry, madam" he
said as he checked up. eyes, it's an
occasion whefsympathy makes one
feel good" she replied, as she got up,
"but believe I'll break this parasol
over your head for luck" And she
walloped him until there wasn't any
thing left to strike with.-Detroit
Free Press.
i They say the Rev. Theodore L.
: Cuyler, of Brooklyn, who is resting
at DR.. Strong's, was talking with a
Saratoga farmer the other day.
Hasn't it been too dry for crops,
especially for potatoes, around here,
and wouldn't it be good idea to If
} rigate between the rows?' asked the
brooklyn divine.
"The Lord knows his biz," replied
, old slouch hat. "Jes let the Lord
} alone, and crops II be all r1ght.''
"Well, my friend, don't know any
place where the Lord is let more Sc
,, verely alone than he is around Sara
toga."
Mr.. BIvens, an old bachelor Of
Rochester, who is very much absorb
. : ed in politics, visited the Widow Ora.
ham the other day, just after reading
!. Grants letter, and asked her what
she thought Of a third term. Now
the widow has been twice married
:. and in response to the question she
; made rush for the astonished Mr.
4 Blivens and taking him tightly il
her arms exclaimed, 30, you dear,
y dear man! What a happy woman
ami" At last accounts Mr.. B. had
locked himself in his woodhouse, and
> was endeavoring to explain things to
the widow through the keyhole.
u Advocates of schemes for trans
u ferring the telegraph business to thu