The New Orleans bulletin. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1874-1876, 1875-02-21
ROMANCE OF A WHITE HAT.

ROMANCE OF A WHITE HAT.
The story has Just reached u.s. lis our ms
fortune not our FAULT, that did not hear Of i
sooner, and 50 We do not feel called upon tt
apologize t. either the hero or the pubic
Prejudices against particular things belong tC
the neXplcable cccentIlcities Of human nature
A gentleman OF oar acquaintance had an III
nate horror OF white hats, not that he believes
that the propnquity Of white hats NECESSARILY
endangers the integrity Of pocket books-lt is
only an ldiosyncrasy. A friend ignorant Of this
antlpathy sent him . present of tall cuU,a
covering, about the color OF fresly-wash he'd
snowflake hung up to dry, wJh the request that
he would wear 1t IL 1,eDtortaht
With many mis5ivings, such as the ignorant
have OF Fridays, thirteen at table, and otGer
superslilous errors, he put on the hat, took an
aileCtiQnatc leave Of his wife. and went to the
club. How it happened nobody knows, but when
he left he carried home BRICK in that that z
On reaching his front door, after the usual pre-
llminary experiments, lie succeeded i'll getting
his night key III the lock, and proceeded to bed
He had disrobcd to his red flannel shirt aud
"what-yo umay- call- ems, but forgot to take off
his token Of friendship, and stumbling over the
boot jack, he fell forward with such force against
the bedstead as to bury his headup to his shout
ders in the white hat aforesaid.
The noise awOke Mrs. Jones, his wife. Seeing
what looked like the inverted governor of a
steam engine before her eyes-for M Jones was
cbdlihILi VI has ilcdt tCctUlllc mo-
tions toward the ceiling with pair Of stout le4 s
encased III scarlet wOolen-she screamed mur-
der 50 fire. ''robb,rs.' THIS brought the
COOK down stairs, VINO recognized Mr.. Jones
from patch in his unlnentiOnables so she re-
assured Mrs Jones, when at glance they both
took IN the situation. But hoH in the devil to
get Jones out Of the nat, or the hat off of Jones
was the question. Mrs j. took hold of Mr.. J. $
feet and the cook took hold of the brim of the
hat. lone, two, three, and pull together, :"
Il q zoe EG hrIp nd j,a, DrI,
was suddenly seated on some hot ashes in front
of the CRATE. 1t is needless to observe that she,
with prerlpltancy, changed her position.
Jones lay on the floor painting apparently for
breath. Mrs Jones foresaw deata BY sufocation.
The cook, fertile in resources, heated the poker
and be gan pcrforatlng the prison-house of Jones
classic head With air holes. That the red hot
iron should have come in contact with the end OF
Jones nose might have been expected, but it was
not guarded against.
The noise that now came out OF that hat and
the violent gyratlons Of the sufferer, convinced
his wife that jones had an apOplectic attack FOR
certain. The cook threw a shawl over her shoul-
ders to run across the street fol- the doctor.
A butchers bull-terlier who had been locked
ont and not provided With a night-key, was wan
derinS about seeking compan onshlp and adven-
turo, and aSsed by as the cook opened the door
and hearing Jones sm0thered ordinations he
took them fur he beatnes Of an esca ped calf
ana made : dash between the COOKS LEGS mset.
mo 'Sit "lii4S SoIltl, anu III
few moments bad a satisfactory hold on Jones
white hat, monthtul OF Jones back hair and a
piece Of his right ear.
A policeman rushed lip and found Mrs. Jones
Standing on the bureau, and tie dog making it
very lively for Jones by dragging him aboat ms
1wn chamber III most inliscrlmina, manner
The cook in the meantime had gathered herself
up and como t. the assistance Of the s'peeler."
VINO directed her to tale hold Of Jones heels
while he fastened on to the dogs tail.
a. q IN ,rl,in L
yield first, Jonos's hat or the dogs tail At on
mother that the tail was coming ont. Batnt-
urc does its work better than art. so the hat