The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1875-11-20

cowhide boot right where his coat-tails graceful
" bob! bob! as he travels Shall Canada b.
made to pay for this, or shall we pay Canada
Let's have an understanding. -Free Press.
How soon some women change their mind
respecting their husbands! Mrs. Spinn was for
ever telling her husband that he wasn't wort
the salt in his bread; but when he got killed Il
q railway collision, she sued the company Il
five thousand dollars.
Few women are like Mary Ann Davis, of Loui
siana. When she found that her bread wa
"heayy" she hung herself with bed cord ant
advised Davis to marry a French cook.
Somebody stole n lot Of tarts from bakery II
Concord, the other day, and now the baker II
lccturng on Lost Arts.-Uanbury Ae,nS.
The remarkable absence Of a smoky atmos
pherc during the Indian summer at Omaha anc
other western points is accounted for by the
fact that the tobacco served out to the Indians
was too poor to smoke.
When the postal cards first appeared, newspa-
per men, who thought they knew everything
SAID that they'd never be used for the transmits
sion Of feryid sentiment How mistaken was
this impression is shown by the fact that Mid
dleburg, n. Y. postal card reads as follows:
Deer Mary, for the luv OF god serd me a
pair Of pants"
If the ladies of the period are as just as they
are beautiful they will contribut something to-
monument for King Canute was the per-
sen who originally ordered the ,id1 back.
Two years ago a millionaire named Johnson,
while riding by in an Indiana railway train, fell
in love with pretty girl sitting on fence, and
subsequently married her, Now, express train
passengers say that all the fences dong The In
diana railroads are daily lined wI.h handsome
girls, as thick as crows in cornields.
A Chicago girl 10, and 'eiress to $3,Ooo,O00,
wants to meet moor man whom she could love-
and it is queer why she can't meet one out Of
S94 columns Of delinquent tay.payers.-.St Louis
Republican.
The Grdphic reminds Messrs. Moody and San
KEY that the revival most needed is the revival
Of business. Naughty but nice.
A curious thing is love, which cometh from
above, and lighteth like dove on some; but
some it never hits, unless it gives them fits, and
,cattcrs all their wits. Oh, hum.
The Glasgow Times would appear to have
igurcd out the thing pretty accurately when it
remarks: "The man who is curious TO see how
he world could get along without him can find
)ut by sticking q cambria needle into a mill
pond, and then Withdrawing it and looking at
he hole"
The paper on which the bank of England notes
ire printed has been made since l7l9 at 4 place
allied Laverstock 1t is made Of new linen Oh
,otton. and note will support thirty-six pounds
before being sized, while if it Is one of the right
lie it will support man for years.
Was Noah justified in taking the two parent
mosquitoes in the Ark? That's a good question
o start lyccum on.
Walt Whitman has interviewed Kecly:
unlimited, most straAge
Sleeping talent in the msts of time
from ages past chaotic. All hail
power! Where will thy limit stops
,sk ye OF the winged winds that
Round our pathway roll! The auGwer comes
When all things bust
A man named Thomas Stout recently victim
zed some cattle dealers in Putnam county, In
Llama, to the extent of $1,000 and then disap
oeared, whereupon the st. Louis Republican in
ers that it is the Chicago alderman OF that name
md snarls out, there's Chicago honesty"
Here's philosophy: "The particles that day
before yesterday were grains Of wheat, and yes
erday were nerve and muscle, to-day are spark.
ing thought. Hence life; hence oysters and oil
,ther folks"
Mrs Scott Siddons, while at Danbury last
week, lost silver nutmeg crater, over which
he seems inconsolable. She ought to have
known better than to take such an implement
nto the nutmeg state"
Mrs. Livermore says that marriage and home
ire not all that woman wants. She's just right.
They'd want new bonnet.
Now that the election is over, The weather
prophet has got down to business, and predicts
wenty-six snow storms the coming winter
As though there warn't Smiths enough al
'eady, they have started Smith Manufacturing
IOmpany in Connecticut