The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1875-04-03

woman TO Talleyrand. ]" Because,
madam, it / had looked / could not
have passed. !"
A careful housewife in Altoona put
an SIS order and a SO greenback into
the drawer of the coffee mill last
Wednesday for safe keeping. Thurs
day morning the family enjoyed . $28
cup Of coffee.
Miss Nilsson has been ordered by
her physician to warmer climate;
Int Mr.. Nilsson says that il there is
u warmer climate than the one he has
lived in for some months back he isn't
aware of it.
Nellie's sartorishasjoined the Wash
ingtoD Gymnasium. 1t is not the pun
for We, have used that before. but
it is our anxiety. for dear, darling
Nellie, which irresistably inlpels us 70
remark that these gymnastics are Sar-
torisky.
!" Why is it," asks an exchange,
"that nearly every Senator's wife in
Washington is 4 handsome woman !"
It is simply because nearly every Sem
ator's wife who is not handsome
woman i, left 1T home. - Courier-sJoMv-4
nal.
1t was probably an attack Of tito .
green-eyed monster, that induced the
Chicago Intcr-t ocean to say that 8 on
the night that Victoria Woodhul lee
tnred and the can-can appeared, the ],
Common Council of Jackson, Mich,
failed to hstYf i Q quorum. =
- lssnsu - -
carrying trunk along the street, and
collared him. The negro explained /:
:" De family what was boarding me-
has been axing for money ,Nnd US dey
was gone out tonight I Thought
would get into some family whar dey
respected de panic.n
Ned Vose used to travel around
Colorado with u performing bear, but
a great change came one day last week,
and now the bear travels around alone,
thirkink over old times, and OCCASION
ally lelning up against a tree as q
pang shoots through his bowels. Ned
is inside that bear -1Milvaukee NcU8.
g Yes, sir" yelled a preacher in q
Dakota church, one Sunday morning,
+" there's more lying, and swearing,
and stealing, aud general deviltry to
tln square inch i'll this here town than
all the rest of the American country
and then the congregation got up aud
dumped the preacher out Of the vim
dow.
The charge that Botkin of the Mil
waukee Sentinel, has to pull on his
uadershirt from below on account of
the size Of his ears, is a base inven-
ton. We've known Bot. over twenty
one years, have slept with him great
many times, and We know that his
ears are flexible. In cold weather we
used to use the off one for an extra
qnilt.-CincinMah Times.
A pretty good story is told Of one
of Governor Tilden's staff. It is said
that when the divi.lual referred to-,
first pretended himself en- p1ilitaire to.
his wife aud little daughter, the lat
ter, after gazing mt him in wonder for
a few minutes, turned to her mother
and exclaimed :. why, ma, that's
not a real soldier, It's pat"
The paying teller of the Union Saw
Jugs Bank at Oakland, California, is
suffering the agonies Of the wicked
By the conduct of Young man who
deposited $3.50, and each day with
sepuIchra' soleInnity comes at a given
hour aud draws ont one dollar. Three,
pass books have been used up, and
the teller is trying +, compromise by
the otfer OF a twenty dollar piece to
close the account.
:. Mother wants to know if you won't
please to lend her your preserving
| kettle--'ca,,se rs how she wants to-
preserve Z" I'VE would with pleas
ure, boy. but the fact is, the last tin. 9
We lent it to Your mother she pre-
served it 50 effeetlHilIy that we have
never seen it since" .sWelI, you
needn't be so sassy about your old
kettle, mother ". uisln't have troubled
sna agi',. only we seed you have i
new oBe.n
/ Here is a good thing on tl,. later
bug" Three nici, comparing notes :
One says, g There are two bugs to
every stalk" A second says, q They
have cut down my early crop aud are
sitting on the fence waiting for my
iate crop to come up.n j" psi,aw! =
] said the third. you know nothing
;lh'H. it. PASSED seed stare tic
other day and tax the bugs hooking
over the books til SEE wlss, lad puy,
! ..ia..,..i ...l.I LII 1.1..; 9. -