The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1875-05-28
EDITOR True NoRrHEnSER :

EDITOR True NoRTHERsER =
Being much interested, myself, in "Vlllage
Gossip" | thought perhaps little country
gossip might be interesting to villagers, so send
you an item from our little hamlet.
An ancient maiden lady OF rural district not
thousand miles from Paw Paw, and the pos
SCISSOR OF several hundred broad acres, has a
niece Cher only surviving relatively whom she
has reared from infancy, and who has just illus
trated the trite saying that - the course OF true
love never did run smooth" or the baseness of
ingratitude whichever way one looks at it.
The charms Of the young lady in question, it
is affirmed by those best acquainted, are far
from being any wise extraordinary, but being
heir apparent. not to crown, but the afore-
said broad acres, had many suitors and was
much sought after by class OF men termed
fortune hunters" But it appears that two
of the aspirants to the hand OF the divine
Salhe Maria had dstanced all competitors
John, tall, slender and graceful with empty
smile, and much gwen to howery rhetoric, or
"perfumed sentences and glitterng cadences,"
as Josh would say. And Sam, proprietor OF a
fruit farm, neither slender or graceful, ON the
contrary strongly resembles some of our teuton
friends, who stand behind the bar of lager
beer saloons. The former by his seductive
smiles, had insidiously won his way into the
affections of the susceptible Sa.lie, while the
latter. by the influence OF his worldly posses.
sions, had made equal progress in the good
graces of "aunt Jerusha," as she Is called by
every body. We often hear it remarked that
" truth Is stranger than fiction" yet doubtless
our story will sound like a creation OF fancy
1t seems that some time since the hard and
practical aunt Jerusha, who is not at all gwen
to sentmentality. had forbidden her niece to
receive any more attentions from John, the
graceful In vain did she upbraid the stern
aunt with her cruelty and say she loved dear
John to madness and could not live without
him. .Jerusha was exorable. she ordered the
gushing Sallie to cease her nonsense, and pre-
pare her bridal array to wed with Sam, the
stout. Meantime Sam was making daily visits
and connecting plans for the speedy consumma-
ton of his matrimonial projects. Poor Sallie's
trials we're fast approaching a crisis. Now
comes the grand denouement.
One evening last week there was social at
the residence OF mutual friend Jerusha,
her niece and the two suitors were present
Sam and Jerusha had set trap for the sorrow
ing and unsuspecting Sallie. She was watched
for some time with jealous care by her cruel
prosecutors put seeing the youthful Adonis
made no attempt to approach, they relaxed
their vigilance and retired to corner totperfect
their plan to have the ceremony performed at
once. John seeing the field clear, soon made
his way to the side Of his enamorata, whispered
few magic words in her ear, when presto
Sallie with hat and shawl was out Of the house
and on her way with John to the parson's.-
We will leave Sallie and John, and return to
Sam and Jerusha. 1t was some time before
the elopement transpired; but when the plot
tiers discovered there had been counter plot.
the aunt was furious and the expectant bride
groom so chagrined at the loss OF his intended
that he proposed to aunt Jerusha on the spot
This coup de main OF Sans was like oil on the
troubled waters, and when the man Of the
white neckcloth had pronounced them man
and wife" they returned to their home as serene
as a summer morning.
Such Is life. Most girls marry sooner OF
later,-,t was later with aunt Jerusha.
JONATHAN PERKINS.