davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1875-05-12
PgR S-9LE OR REyTT.

FOR RENT-The comfortable Dwell
a$i LING HOUSE, next door west Of the resi-
dence OF Rev. jas. L. Johnston, on Prince 81.
Has gas and water and all modern convenlences;
Also very comfortable and eligible OFFICE
in the building corner King and Fal fax streets.
my " NV ~ JOHN W. BURKE.
VALUABLE CITY PROPERTY AT PKl-
VATE SALE.
The HOUSE and LOT on the southeast cor
ncr Of Duke and Columbus streets Is offer ssssSS
cd ut private sale The lot has front on .aslsl
Duke street of l25 feet, and runs back parallel
with Columbus street Bis feet has on it, besides
the dwelling, fine Ice House, quite number
of choice fruit and ornamental trees, grape vines,
&C. &c. The location is desirable, and 1t IS
considered one of the most attractive pieces OF
property in the city.
plying either on the premises or to MI: HEN
BERT BkY ANT, No % King street, Alexan- A.
dria, Va. ap 2s-lm
FOR SALE OR RENT-The LARC q
ETHREE.STORYB BRICK HOUSE, cover
ed with slate, on the east side Of Royal street,
between Prince and Duke, now occupied by
Rev. Dr. Mitchell For terms apply to
jan 23-tf CHAS. K. HOOFF.
VALUABLE REAL ESTATE FOR SA LIE
Y IN THE CITY OF ALEXANDRIA
ASpIN !, THE 4 GDHNTlES EIpGIN1a Of ALE1AN-
~
N. THAT valuable thrce-story BRICK
HOUSE No 40 south Washington street, EssaS
Alcxandria, with an alley on the side from .Qszl
Washington street and an alley in the rear
from Duke street, formerly the residence of the
late Mr. John Lloyd, deceased.
No 2-The one-story BRICK HOUSE, Efss Efss
No. 49, on Queen street, between Wash -RskA
ington and Columbus streets.
no "a TRACT OF LAND of say 33 acres,
in Fairfax county, called the MILL TRACT,
bout eight miles from Alexandria.
No 4-That beautifully situated and well inn
pro, ed SMALL FARM, of say 6G acres lin
DEN" late the residence of Mr. Fred'k k. Lloyd,
now deceased Will make q splendid market
gardcr, rs the ground Is rich, and AS resld dence
for health and sltuation is not surpassed In the
county.
The above property must be sold to settle cs,
tatcs, &c, and the prices will be made low and
the terms easy to suit the times on application
to Us. JOHN }. LLOYD, Admir-. &c.
RICH d. LLOYD, Atty. tor heirs.
my 3-nolm -----.
FOR RENT OR SALE-Thst desirable
E$i ID DWELLING No. II south st Asaph ST.,
near King street, formerly owned by Il. IL.
NJ iIer. Price S3, 900. Apply on the premises
my Scott
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1875-05-12

FOR SALE OR RENT-The LARG q
STORY BRICK HOUSE, cover
ed with slate, on the east side of Royal street,
between Prince and Duke now occupied by
Rev Dr. Mitchell. For terms apply to
ian 23-tf CHAS. L. HOOFF.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1875-05-12
Alexa. Gazette d Virginia advertiser.

FOR THE COUNTRY
PUBLISHED REGULARLY ON
TUESDAYS, THURSDAYS AND SATURDAYS.
At fps dollars per AMMAN.
Transient advertisements inserted at $l.0O per
suusre, (cight lines or less) for first insertion,
and .wenty-f cents for each subsequent in
ser.iou.
usries will be charged at advertisement rates
for notices over four lines.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
A Matrimonial Agreement.

The following copy of an agreement,
prepared in 1885,. by a woman who
wanted to live happily with her trouble
some husband, is published in the Knox
vile Press and Hcrald:
You do solemnly swear that you never
will beat nor Gus or abuse me without
CRATER provication than have given YOU;
that you will not debar me from going
to see my connections and neighbors
when opportunity permits, nor them
from coming to my amusement or assis-
tance i'll sickness nor health: that you
will not be against going with me to
meeting OF for Inc to go OH the same
terms; that you will never throw up
what has beenpassed in angler; that you
will provide house room handy to water
and stay thare; that you will not move
me out of the settlement without [ am
willing to go; that you will provide
things to work on an with; that you will
not treat me with the hard hip, fout or
wound my feelings as you have done,
but perform the duties of husband, and
try for living in peace on all sides. /
do most solemnly swear that 1 will not
throw up what has been passedin angler;
that L will not tiout nor wound your
feelings without cause; that L will per-
form the duty of wife as far as health
an reason will admit. 1 will treat you
with kindness while you do me, and try
for living in peace on all sides.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
Patent Medicines,

That there are some good patent
medicines no intelligent man dare for a
moment deny; and pre-eminent is the
great California hero medicine, Vine
gar Bitters. discovered by DR.. J. Walker,
prominent physician Of San Francisco.
Ihls medicine, although called bitters,
is not to be classed among the vile
fancy drinks " recommended and
sold over the bar by rum-venders, but is
a combination of pure herbalistic ex-
tracts, known to possess sterling medi-
clnal qualities, and is compounded with
out the use in any shape of spirits. Its
action upon the internal system is not
stimulating to the extent that alcoholic
poison is, but it at once attacks blood
impurities, and byrcmoving the original
cause destroys the germs of disease and
invites returning health. Its action upon
the stomach and liver renders it an al
most certain specific in the most stub
born cases of dysp psia, and in truth
imparts new life and vigor to the whole
system. 1t is one of the best medicines
ever invented.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
A Pumpkin Story.

A Paris market gardener had a patch
OF pumpkins in his lot. He gave him
self little heed about his pumpkins, see
ing them thrive and swell day by day.
Last September it occurred to him that
the fruit must be nearly ripe, and at
early morning he went to examine. The
first pumpkin startled him ; some hand
as patient as malignant had inscribed
upon it his opinion that M. Bernard, the
gardener, was, in fact, something which
no gentleman would desire to be. Dur
ing the pumpkins tenderest age of inno-
cence had these words been traced, and
they had grown with it's growth, retail
ing their callImny larger and larger every
day. M. Bernard turned up another,
and found a like inscription Every
pumpkin in the plot bore it's libel. Flu
rlous, the market gardener sought his
enemy and served him with a summons.
The case came on for trial, but there was
want of proof. One of the witnesses
cited, after listening attentively to the
course OF evidence, perceived on sud
den what it was all about, and exclaimed,
innocently: "Why, it was l who
scratched the pumpkins" Promptly he
found himself in the dock. Counsel for
the defense argued that there had been
no publication of the libel, such as is
contemplated by the law. The court,
however, decided otherwise, since the
garden was proved 20 have no hedge
about it, and the pumpkins had for
months exposed their calumnies to any
one who CHANGED to look at them. And
so the engraver of vegetables was con-
demned to $40 fine.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
Spilkins and the Grangers.

Some two months ago Mr.. and Mrs.
Spilkins, at the close of one of their
lively Masonic conversations, agreed
upon compromise, which was that they
should both join the Changers. Spilkins,
however, with that gallantry for which
he IS SO distinguished, and, as he said,
TO prove his good faith in the matter,
proposed that Mrs. s. should join first,
and LIP that way become enabled in turn
to participate in his initiation. His wife
Jumped at the idea, but stipulated, that
rs It might be embarrassing for her to
go through alone, she would like to have
her widowed sister, Mrs. Stickwitz, Join
the order with her, if possible. Spillins
readily acceded to this, and shortly af-
terward the two ladies' applic cition for
membership went in. In due time they
were elected and ordered to present
themselves for initiation. On that event
ful night the noblest side of Spilkins'
character shone forth. He got supper,
washed the dishes, put the children to
bed, and sat up till two o'clock in the
morning, waiting for the ladies to get
home. When they did come an air of
awful mystery pervaded their de-
meanor. Spilkins didn't exactly like it,
and thought it augured badly, but he
kept still and waited his turn. A week
later, an ominous silence on the subject
having been meanwhile observed by
Mrs. s., Spilkins mildly suggested that
now would be agood time, SO he thought,
to send in his application. Mrs S.
Looked at him and laughed. cit will be
Il no avail, Leander," shereplied. "And
why not, my love?" inquired Spilkins,
great drops of perspiration starting from
his brow as the situation family dawned
upon him; "why not, my lovel' "Be.
cause, sir, replied Mrs Spilkins, "Sis-
ter Araminta and 1 will black-ball you.
sure as fate" Then, for the first time,
Spllkins discovered he had been check
mated. VILLAIN I" continued Mrs. S..
In tragic voice, which made the family
cat seek safety in flight; "villain! at
last l m even with you. No lodge for
memo Grange for you. Stay home
henceforth from the lodge and 1 stay
home from the grange. Continue your
horrrld weekly Masonic orgies and 1
at Spilkins could hear no more.
He rushed frantically from the house,
upsetting Herodotus in his fight, and
after remaining absent two days came
home, signed articles of surrender, and
hasn't been to the lodge since.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
Fighting n Tarantula,

A dog is the hunters usual companion
but in tropical countries O sportsman
finds use for cats, it seems, and for
something beyond rat-catching, too.
had pair of jet black, yellow eyed
cats, twin brothers, of very large size,
which followed me when walked around
my grounds, and they usually accom-
panied me when | hunted the Texan
hares on the adjacent mesquite prairie,
or when L angled in my fishing boat on
the Colorado river. They were very
much attached to me, and commonly sat
near or slept under my chair or table
when L was reading or writing.
They possessed unusual intelligence,
and L had taught them variety of
amusing tricks. They were as useful to
me i'll my war upon the tarantulas, rs
pointer that l had was in my contest
with the snakes, although the spiders
were not so numerous or dangerous as
the copperheads.
One day L was sitting in passage
between two rooms of an unfinished
house, upon which the carpenters were
at work, carelessly leaning back against
the wall, reading while the cats were ly-
ing near me, on the rock pavement which
formed the floor of the passage. One of
them sprang suddenly, and gave me
sharp blow upon the side of my knee,
which attracted my notice slightly; but
as they often did something of the sort
to induce me to lay aside my book when
they wished me to give them water, OF
to play with them, L did not pay particu-
lar attention to it, and resumed my
reading.
Soon one of them leaped three OF four
feet in the air, and struck me on the
shoulder, and instantly the other sprang
almost as high as my head, and knocked
a huge tarantula from the collar of my
coat, which fell heavily upon the pave
ment. 1t Immediately "made battle" "
by facing the cats and raising its two
fore legs at them, and threatening them
with display of its fangs.
L did not interfere with the fight,
knowing that the cats understood how
to conduct it. They quickly separated,
and one confronted the enemy, while
the other placed himself in the rear.
When the spider made furious but in
effectual spring at the one which faced it,
the other behind gave it sharp pat upon
the head with its paw, which paralyzed
it.
1 then took it up with pair of tongues,
and placed it upon the top of conical
hill of the usefnl insectivorous yellow
ant of western Texas, which is very diff
terent from the grazing ant for which it
is often mistaken by ignorant or unob-
serving people, and which is a pest to
Myriads of these insect
eaters soon coyera1 tbn b1anl bo;r1-
carcass, and disappeared, with it in their
subterranem vaults, where I suppose it
was added to their winter stores.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
BURNETT's COCAINE is the best and
cheapest hair dressing in the world.-Co,n.

A HINT TO THE WORKING MANA
man with II family. however poor ho may bs
owes it TO his wife to rave her health aud
strength IN every way popsiblo. He bnH ~
right to allow tho mother OF his olildfon b.
wear her life out toiling with her noadle to
clothe her family. His duty IN TO buy the
Wilson shuttle rowing machine, tho best mn
chime for family eowingnnd manufacturing put.
poses ever invented, and ho can buy the Wilson
machine upon terms which enable him TO INV
Tor 1t in small monthly inHtallmonip that be
can spare out OF hiH wages without feeling the
drain. He will get, thereby, " machine capable
of doing every variety OF family work in tho
most beautiful manner n machine that even n
child can operate, and which will provo n per-
manent family blessing. Machines will be
delivered at any railroad station in this county,
free Of transportation chargcs If ordered
through the company's branch houte Mt S27
and S29 Broadway, N Y. They send an elegant
catalogue and chrome circular free on appli-
cation. This company want few more agents.
g m
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
On the Stand.

A correspondent, describing the APP
pearance of the Rev. Henry Ward
Beecher on the witness stand, says AT
times his deep bass intonation resounded
over the court, then the emphatic voice
quivered with pathos, then it trembled
and broke with emotion; again, he
mimiced the pompous theatricality of
Tilton, and SO he reproduced all the
varied styles of the characters who ap-
peared in their different modes. He
tore up scrap of paper and flung it on
the floor to illustrate how Tilton had
torn and dashed down the so-called con-
fession OF his wife. He fumbled in his
pocket to show how Moulton once fun
bled for key. He crossed his arms to
show bew Mrs. Tilton lay in bed, and so
on, n
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
Imports and Exports.

Previous to the war the exports of the
United States had, rs normal state of
things, exceeded the imports, the excess
on this. account during the ten years be-
tween 1851 and 1860 having amounted
to an average sum of $4,000, 600 annually
After the war the balance was largely
the other way-the imports were in ex-
cess of the exports. In the five years,
lS69-1S72, inclusive, the excess amounted
on an average to $44, ,000,O annually,
while in 1872 it grew to $4,000, 900.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

SAVED LITIGATION.-"I have come, F"
said Scotch farmer to a neighbor laird
who was just dying, 81 have come to
settle about that bit of land" "Set-
tle't!" cried the old wrangler; "how
will you settle't Your father couldna
settle't, and your grandfather couldna
settle't, and the fifteen couldna set
tlet, and how will you settle't p "Oh, I"
said the rival claimant, "I'll let you
hive it altogether" "But I'll not tax
it,, cried the stout old litigant, and turn
ed his face resolutely to the wall.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
HARD ON CH1cAGo.-A st. Louis pane

HARD ON CHIoAGo.-A st. Louis paper
sa is: Storey, of the Chicago Times, is
Ill jail at last. That man should have
slandered almost everything and every
body of pure and good repute for years,
and at last be sent to Jail for what he
said about Chicago grand jury, re-
minds us forcibly OF one of those re-
markable episodes of which we often
read, wherein man who has gone
through a dozen battles unscathed is
at last kicked to death by a mule or
killed by falling tree.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

CoRREoT-When a man hands an
editor an articlef for publication, and asks
him to A" fix it up" because he "wrote
it in a hurry" and "hadn't time to re-
wise it," you may know that he com
menced the article directly after supper,
and wrestled with it until midnight, re-
writing it fourteen times, destroying a
quire of foolscap, and "blessed" his
pen every two minutes. That's the way
they generally write an article when
they are sin hurry" and have emo
time to revise it."
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
A Spell.

This spelling school .furore has been
OF great help to at least one Detroiter.
He has been counting a girl for three
years past and hadn't the courage to
speak mis- mind. AS they were seated on
the sofa the other night she referred to
the spelling school excitement and added:
" Matrimony is an awful long word to
spell, isn't it p He leaned over, grasped
her hand, and the next morning he had
arrangements made to be married on the
Fourth of July.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29
For All Female Complaints.

in young or old, married or single, at the dawn
Of womanhood or the change of life, DR..
Pierce's Favorite Prescription manifests such
a positively remedial influence as to call forth
the loudest praise from all who use it.
Mr.. John A. Kinney, druggist Of Kncb
Noster, NO., writes as follows
CDR. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y.-Dedr Sir-Your
medicines sell better than any other 1 keep,
and give universal satisfaction. The people
are especially delighted with your Favorite
Prescription, and it seems to be favorite
among all that have ever used it," 1t is sold
by druggists and dealers in medicine Com.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

PERUVIAN SYRUP. Il his valuable
medicine has been silently making its way into
public favor by the numerous remarkable
cures it has performed. Its singular efficacy
is owing to the protoxide of iron which in this
preparation remains unchanged, and is the
only form in which this vital clement of healthy
blood can be supplied. Com.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

WELL DoNE.-A foolish person in the
gallery of the California Theatre, San
Francisco, the other evening, created a
panic by crying "Fire!" A bright
light shining in at the windows added
to the terror caused. The doorkeeper
barred his doors, and shouted: "There's
no danger! the fire is a mile away |!
stand back !" aud at length quelled the
excitement.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

DPHTHERIA.-This fatal disease APP
pears to have been successfully com
bated by DIR. Thomas Prangley, of Eng
land, by the local application of tincture
OF iodine, to the strength of forty eight
grains to the ounce, to every part of the
throat covered by the membrane at least
once in twenty-four hours; and if the
larynx be invaded, the inhalation of
iodine vapor mixed with steam.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

~ run RI ME, AND Pill 10 YOU GOOD.''
ton of impurities of the blood dyspepsia torpid liver
and its kindred diseases successu the use
OF pr: LASGLEN'S ROOT AND HERE
BlTTEtS. They act as a potent tonic and gentle
aperent are mild in their operations, safe under any
circumstances and thousands have borne testimony to
the benefits they have derived from their use They are
the safest and best spring and summer medicine yet
discovered. Family physicians regularly prescribe
them. GEO. q. GOODWIN & 90, BosToN,
Whnasala Appnia
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

Theodore Thomas, of Thomas or
chestra, than whom there is no higher
musical authority in the world, says
there are no other cabinet or parlor or
gans equal to those made by the Mason
" Hamlin Organ Co.. and that musicians
agree with him in this opinion.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

ARE You AWARE THAT THE Fremont.
TORIES OF CONSUMPTION are coughs, colds,
bronchitis, pains III the side and chest, diff
;ulties of breathing, etc? If you permit these
symptoms to run on tubercles will be the re-
suit, and end in consumption. Now, if you
want to cure these diseases use Aliens Lung
Balsam without delay. For sale by all medicine
dealers.-COm.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

A wash that would usually take all day
with ordinary soap, can be done in three
hours, with Dobbins' Electric soap (made
by Cragin & Co., Philadelphia), and it
cannot injure the finest fabric. Try it.
-(OO1
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

There is fire in the eye of the tidy
housewife now, for spring cleaning is at
hand. But the "lord and master" wears
detected look. He minds him OF
cheerless rooms and cold dinners.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

Johnsos''s Anodsne Liniment may be
administered to children with perfect success,
IN cases OF Group, whooping cough, influenza.
and almost any Of the diseases to which they
are liable, Com. -
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

F9' Notice advertisement of the Zinc
Collar Pad. They havo been thoroughly
tested, and the guarantee of this company is
good. Ask hardware dealers or harnees-makers
| for them.-C Com
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

Oppression after eating. headache,
nervous debility, are the effects of Indigestion,
One, or two at most, of Parsons Purgotiue
RUS viii give immediate relief.-Com.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

The keeper of a Paris restaurant went
into his cellar, where he had q moments
vertigo and tainted, and before he was
discovered he was half eaten up by rats.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1875-04-29

Get the best. The best Elastic Truss is
Pomeroys, 744 Broadway, N. Y. Write for it.
COM
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1875-05-18
MTatts0e Ga0leim.

Die Gfiatii1en 0HDner lno nan1entLid
bic Gp6inSSbtna'S brIteH nleilt 3-4nlal
i'm Sabre; tie Derlailen iorntt geiD0DRl;1
ibre Sungen III nod Diilflolem 3ultanoe,
bGuttg lhDn mad As Wo1en, un mic
Ser @ier 5ur neller 8rut 3l legen. 9u
nun Die lungen &il0lein i0Du bon Der
Wlutter umbergefiiDrt ullO an Die freie
Guft getp01nt pur0en, 10 feblt ibnen
bann pl05li9 bel tDrer let6ten Tlaume
feoer6egleitung Die Alte, unter oeren
fi6 ertuGrnen fDAHten. SIT oa5u gar Der
6ubnerDof an uno fir ii0 Deni8 lonnig,
Dobl gar feubf uno rt0t gerdumig, 10
erfraufen Oteielben Iet6t unO iterbel
balo. Q8ia man fe nun ber 9tettung
baIber III etnen geolelten Stau ODER ETH
3tmner l~perren, 10 meroen lie our6 i9r
engeS 8eiiamlnenitBen uuD bic Oiarr6oe,
tpel1e ale iutgen 6ii6ner mebr ODER me-
niger 5u baben pflegell, ben SuBbo0en
balD feu1t MAIDEN, OaOur6 talte SilBe
befommen, bonn S0nupfen befalen lperz
ben uno - menr tbnen ni6t re0t3eittg
gebolfen ipir0 = oabiniterben.
Gs lit Des1al6 = gau3 a6geIe6en bon
dltoern WriinDen BET tDettem ratDianler
bstm NuSbrllten Ser Gier, bon @o1tnz
Gbina, un6 8rabntas Die 9etp0bnli0en
6armbennen gu 6enuBen, tnpem bieie
metit nur einnnat i'm Sabre briiten uuO
tetneSfaas 10 oft mte Die aiiatii0en 9i9z
ner, oeSbalb alio aud Die aus8efGmmez
nen Sungen ldnger nnO iOrgianer bitten.
NtuB ntan aber aus tr9eno tDel1en
@rilnOan = Die Rflege Der %berIaiienen
Maiien lelbit iibernebmen, 10 lit 5u ertz
pfeblen, BEN 8ebdlter ber iungen Gbiere
oreimal bes Says 3u reint9en un0 icoeS=
NAL ben SuBbo0en nit gang trodtnent
Sanbe ODER SdgenebL al beftreuen; 10
fam man BET ether 3ipedmdBigen Suite
r%ungspeiie aud iii 3irnmer re6t ipo6G
geiuuOe unO trQftige 0iiDner aufjieDen.