The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1875-07-17

Nassar college has sent iorth lorty-two oach-
elors " Of art.
An exchange says there are three female com
positors in the United States to-day where there
was but one four years ago" Singular. The
male comps. had better look out.
The New York Times describes Theodore TIL
ton as the solitary figure OF a man who has
been stripped of wife, home and employment"
which, under the circumstances is almost as
good as the plea Of the French homicide who,
in being brought up to receive sentence for kill
ing his father and mother, cautioned the court
not to Zeal severely with poor orphan!
4 Galena woman was praying on the grave OF
her dear departed when goat butted her from
behind over the railing into another lot. She
picked herself up, and ran TO Attends house for
shelter To this hour sho believes it was a
ghost
Boston used to be Botolphs-Town.
1t is easier to run in debt than it is to get out
again.
Boston girls are 70 modest that they call leg
acy, limbacy.-DonJury Ntcs.
Faporite air with the ladies'" In the sweet
buy and buy"
A Kentucky editor, far gone with dclirium
tremens, was saved by the TRANSMISSION OF water.
l--E1chaHge.
This plan will not be tried here until the river
gets little higher.
An exchange speaks of Methodist straw
berry festival" We are glad to know that straw.
berries are religious, and that they are Metho-
dsts, too.
Have you drank that exquisite perfume OF
the apple blooms which now fills all the air :"
asks an exchange, No; we prefer cider-BOs
POST
Whskey, you mean.
An otherwise competent compositor on the
from him because he mutfed a fly in the left
field. He muiln't do it any more.
The longest night in Norway lasts three
months, and when IL young man goes 10 see his
girl her mother, before retiring, tells her not to
ruin her health by sitting up more than two
months-Er.
We saw a couple Oh Columbus street one
evening last week that ought to live in Norway
We think that the compile were nearing the
third month, from the fact that the young lady
had lost her strength, and the young man was
holding her in his arms.
| Young men who wear Il handkerchief in theil
| pistol pockets will confer a favor on u blush
Ing public by having them embroidered. Peo
pie would like to feel sure it's handkerchief
and not.
A Michigan farmers daughter almost killed
young fellow by putting dose of " condition
powders in his cider. He was slow in his WOO
| ing, and she wanted TO make him "frisky,n as
she calls it.
A French woman considers it good fortune 10
little. She is almost willing beforehand 10 sup
port him wholly or in part for the sake of he.
| ing " madame"
When IN enraged woman meets a man in The
street nov, pulls out rawhide, knocks hin
down, cuts jackets with him and dances iiend
ishly over his PROSTATE form, 1t is called COW
hiding matinee"
A man has an object and walks. woman
never walks; she jumps, she runs, she dances
she capers hithrr and thither, up and down anC
everywhere; she caracoles, but She never walks
We Pai1SteJlse.
Some Springfield, Ohio, boys tied rope round
Il snOozng bummers neck and flung the enc
weighted, over 4 fence. The man woke up
checked, thought he was hung, Yelled the 20
lice came, released him, and he busted.
On Duck river, in Tennessee, is q steamboat
drawing only foot Of water, and having g:is
mill ON board, which wanders up and down
stopping when she is wanted, TO grind bushe
or two of corn for the farmers.
To find policeman-lOok down every area il
the street. il you do mol 10y accident happen L
see one, ring the bell and ask If the policeman
is In the kitchen. Repeat this at every door, AN,
you cannot fail eventually TO lind one.-Er.
Pedestrians in Walworth county, Mo, now be
) hold fair maidens sitting on the gate-post;
> swinging their arms and chipping to the lark a
the sun comes up and dspels the morning dew
! Two months from now the same girls will b
shying turnips and potatoes at passers-by, all i
the morning sun.
\ playful clergyman named Burrows, in Elml
ra, y. Y, in an oUtburst Of fun, rubbed som
10 fried potatoes and grease IN his wifc's hair an
: added a top dressing Of apple sauce. dull jur
: fined him $780, but he explained to the highe
court that he only wanted 10 tease his wife
little and he was at once discharged.
"