Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1875-05-12
Josh Billings Savings.

SO long as we are willing to own 1T.
1t liz about az hard to alter habit az
it IL to change the size of your nose.
| WOman's last argument liz tears, and
they are always her strongest one; when
theze fail then Gums desperashun
| A bizzy man liz the wust customer the
devil haz to deal with.
| Experience haz been priced more, and
listened to less, than emmy other that I
kan think ov now.
| There liz sum wisdum in guessing af-
ter all, for it liz the nearest you kan cum
to menny things in this life.
Good advice liz like the best medicine
we hav, the most bitter to take.
10 kno yourself and others too liz the
height Of human knowledge.
Just in proporshan that man kan be
counciled ov hiz blunders, just SO there
liz hope for him.
Hope for the future and regrets for
the past for large share of the worlds
philosophy.
Just about the time man haz got old
enuff to travel good gait on his exper-
fence, death taps him on the shoulder
and requests short interview with him
on important Dizziness.
Good and evil are always paid off,
sumtimes Immediately, and sumtimes
not until after they have run at interest
spell.
Habits are often az ridikilous az they
are strong; yu often see folks who kant
pick up pair Nv tongs without splitting
on their hands fust.
Very CRATE minds are seldum fully ap-
preciated bi the age they live in.
1t IL eazier to git friend than to
keep one.
Politeness makes all the other ackom-
plishments eazy and agreeable.
IT, u don't respeckt yurself, how can
yu eypekt others to do it for yu.
1t IL very hard to loose sight of poor
relashun, but we often have to hunt up
| our rich ones.
Sudden wealth seldum comes by hon
esty.
He who kan whistle one tune need
never be entirely lonesome.
1t liz mighty onsartin what lazy boy
or g yuung snaik will amount to.
! He who is afraid ov work is a howard
in everything else.
The strongest friendships have no.
tised have been between thoze who
thought differently, but akted alike.
If-.yu are anxious to bekum famous,
| youmust be willing to be abuzed.
| Lies are not the only things that cum
home to roost; all evil things do.
The experience of life has taught me
that there IL more happiness among the
lowly than the great.
Honesty once lost may be recovered,
| but mOdesty never kan.
Time is CRATE physician. it kures
| broken hearts, broken heads, and even
broken crockery.
! have allwass sed, and silk to it yet,
that he who repents Of sin liz stronger
| and safer man than he who don't COM
NIT it.
The slowest time on rekord is skool
time, and the fastest il sparkling time.
The man who is allwuss prepared for
good or bad lux, and treats them both
alike, liz hero.
[ beleave all thoze who have made
| themselfs common enemys ov mankind,
| hav died violent death.
Take away the fear NV the law, and /
had rather liv amung the bowling
| beasts on the desert than amung man
kind.
He who forgiys another forgivs him
self, for we are all ov us gilty ov about
the same kind ov sins.
The obituary notiss ov menny an old
man liz only this: "John Doe, died,
aged ninety -four years.
| Specialtys are what wins in this world
A jak at all trades liz like man with
feas all over him; he is too bizzy with
the feas to do ennything well.
You will often see CRATE learning and
folly close together, for he who sees
CRATE things plainly IL often apt to see
little things dimly.
The fear of the rod liz more powerful
than the use ov it.
Trooth is simple-so simple that the
phoolish often mistake it for weakness.
"Happy as klam," liz a very COM
mon comparison, but it always struck
me az being rather klammy.
If a man could get rid ov himself,
solitude would be good place for many
of them to go to. ~
| The devil always keeps the guide
boards that lead to his dominions fresh
lettered and i'll good order.
There are no people who get snubbed
! oACSAOA OhcAI Ul1OOO WIZ dIO d1 W SUlCh-
ing their nozes into futurity.
Ii you expeckt to win with lie, yu
hav got to play it quick.
The Eel True Fish.
The eel is true fish, and not, as
timid ladies imagine, snake. It
breathes by gills, and has scales, but the
scales are not visible to the naked eye.
Its litheness, slipperiness, vigor and
slender form, enable it to ascend the
most difficult streams, and it sometimes
leaves the water and travels on the
land round dam or low fall or mi
| CRATES through rank grass, over close
cropped meadows to some neighboring
stream Or pond. The Falls of Niagara,
are to it, an impossible barrier, but it
sometimes, though very rarely, finds
it's way through the Erie canal and
Welland canal into Lake Erie. It mi.
CRATES from the sea and penetrates the
country through the rivers to near the