Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1875-08-13
MULTUM IN PARVO.

80 Is I'd E g 8 9fesN0
THE bat now flies much in sporting
circles.
If {" a stitch in time saves nine" will {
double stitch save eighteen?
A woMAN's name leads the list in the
Boston Directory for 1875.
NEARLY all the horses nowadays make
"the quickest time on record =
THE person who says a new broom
sweeps .cleann ever tried it, that's ALL
THERE are less than 100000 words in
the official report OF the Beecher trial.
THE cost of remembering man can be
counted by the price of his monument.
ANNOUNCEMENT of the death of a dos
by marine reporter. Another bark lost
Al VIRGINIA horse deliberately drowned
himself, which demonstrates that that horse
may be an ass.
SOUTH AMERICAN soldiers have had theil
pay raised to eight cents per day, and now
look out for war.
HANDKERCHIEF Irritation, to be success
full, must have fool on either side of the
street to make the motions.
A MAN being commiscrated with on &C
count of his wife's running away, said
"Don't pity me till she comes back again
THE free-excursion system in Baltimore
has much reduced the death-rate among
the poor children of that city this sum
mer.
THE bank robbers ARE at work agair
after their summer vacation and the sounC
of the exploding torpedo is heard in tht
land.
THERE are not as many old fools in Tho
world as young fools, but there is more
hope for one who belongs to the latter
class.
THIS will be an unusual month in thai
there will be two moons, making 1t the
most moonshiny month known for seven
teen years.
"UNDER some circumstances glass is
liable to break is the way timid grocer
warns the public motto punch their elbows
through his showcase.
ALL butchers are not hard hearted as
has been asserted. One of the craft in
San Antonio cut his throat the other day
because a girl of sixteen made faces al
him.
THE exultation of the New York ed
supply at the Philadelphia Centennial
next year shows clearly that they intend
to be present.
A GOOD many things that would seem
silly in broad daylight sound beautifully
in the moonlight. Likewise many a TO
mantle lady killer at night is a gibberine
fool in the daytime.
THERE was a boy in Maine year OF
two ago who could pronounce the name
of every town in the State, but OF course
he died. His own parents knew from the
first that he would die.
THIS is the season when Death perches
himself ON the sickle-bar and rides around
the field with the mowers and" reapers
looking for snakes, toads, small children
and an occasional man.
NEATNEss, simplicity and durability
are what are wanted in wives as much as
anything nowadays. When the first two
qualities are lacking, however, as little OF
the third as possible is desired.
/ A MAINE paper says that there isn't 8
man in Portland who wouldn't tell de
liberate lie for three cents. Three cents
Three cents? Well, money is a great
temptation Detroit Free Press.
THE man who has spent weeks to train
and tutor fifty head of cabbages may mo-
say word when he gets up some morn
ing and finds six cows in the garden, bu
if he doesn't speak he will die of broken
heart within a week.-Detq0st Press.
Ii you are going to travel in the Indian
Territory you should provide yourself
with plug of tobacco. Alonzo Davis
from New England, was killed by some
miners the other day because he couldn't
furnish them with chew of the weed.
THE insanity dodge for criminals has
been elevated to the status of fine arth as
exemplified by the case of a woman in
Massachusetts who attempted to shoot 8
doctor for refusing to marry her. 1t was
evident that she was sane-because sht
missed him. If she had killed him she
would have been acquitted on the grount
of insanity. In either case she wholly es
capes punishment.
THE Taunton (Mass.) Gazette tells of
young man who recently conceived TIN
brilliant idea of popping the question b.
postal card Accordingly he dispatches
one to the idol of his heart, bearin!
simply his name and this character: 2
His feelings can be imagined on receiving
by return mail a card inscribed most en-
ergetically: I" When last seen he hat
| checked his collar-box for Chicago, AM
was inquiring the price of through ticket
| to the West.
AN amusing story is related of Repre-
sentative-elect Walker, of the Twenty
ninth District of New York. A few day
ago he was seated on porter's truck il
front of hotel in Corning, when lad
| traveller, mistaking him for the porter
requested him to carry her sachel to tn
depot He readily complied, and on reach
ing the lady's destination blandly Gle
clined to receive compensation, and witt
graceful bow left his companion amaze'
at the disinterested politeness of he
porter