American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1875-11-06

self. Twas brung up by good mother, AMI
I'm going to stick to the truth if this boa
doesn't make a cent. Vicks6urg Herald
| MULTUM IN PARv0.
TREASURY Department pastry-Mint
i spies.
THE duck of lover makes a goose of a
4 husband.
GOLD has been found on farm in Mil
bury, Mass, but in very small quantities
The women have raised all the money
necessary for their Centennial Exhibition
building-$2s, 600.
II you have good purpose in mind,
keep II, plan for it and do It; but do moi
talk it to death first.
YOU'VE women are advised to set good
examples, because young men are always
following them.
| WITHIN three days after asking Is per
cent. for his money q Connecticut man
was killed in q saw-mill.
THERE is danger that the spelling dis
order will break out all over the land with
the return of cold weather.
ANNIE CRUDE is the daughter of a
| farmer, and when she is at the churn she
is the Grubb that makes the butter fly.
THE Boston Globe wants to teach politi-
cal economy in the common schools and
throw out quadratic equations and Cicero.
| REJECTED LovER-But couldn't you
learn to love me? Young LADY,
| might tiff 1 never saw you again
Neao York Herald.
In Europe corn-cobs stepped in hot
water containing 2 per cent. of saltpeter are
used as fire. lighters, retailing at three and
four dollars q thousand.
BoY-Can ride, sirs Candidate-Got
quarter in your pocket? Boy-No, but
pap's got vote in his'n. Candidate
Bounce In, sonny, bounce in.
TALK about the extravaganza in dress
of women" cries Martha Jane, exulting
ly. "What do you say to Tweed's six
million suit I'd like to known"
VERMONT proposes a law to prevent any
one from grinding up any but sound
apples for cider. The wormy ones can
be given out to the poor and deserving.
DocToRs say that opium-eating is on
the increase in the United States, and it is
predicted that there will be three fools for
every mile post in another twenty years.
I THE grasshopper, as a hopper, is used
up. He got through September pretty
well but October Topped him on his back,
and the sad winds moaned the echo of his
dying walls.
THERE'S man for you! The editor of
the Providence Press says that cough"
shall be spelled ''koff' as long as he
runs that paper. Now let him go for the
word dough"
For fifty cents Detroit astrologist pre-
diets one husband and moderately happy
life. For q dollar she predicts a second
husband worth 81 zoo, 600, with dead
loads of happiness.
A CHINESE mandarin showed his wife
how to light fire with American kero-
sene, and her experience will be of con-
siderable aid to her second husband
Detroit Free Press. .
AN impecunious chap says there is one
great advantage in always being poor:
You are not likely to commit suicide
while laboring under temporary aberra-
ton of mind superinduced by financial
reverses.'"
The Danbury Neos says: "We never
can tell exactly where we lose our um-
brellas. 1t is singular how gently an UNI
brella unclasps itself from the tendrils of
our mind and floats out into the filmy dis
lance of nothingness.n
AN elderly maiden who had suffered
some disappointment thus defines the
of hair, tobacco-smOke, confusion, con-
ceit, and boots. Woman, the waiter, per-
force, on the aforesaid animal"
| A LITTLE five-year-old Wisconsin boy
was heard saying to his little brother: {"
| know what Amen means. 1t means You
mustn't touch it, mamma told me so.'
Which was his childish, but literal, inter
probation of C So let it be. "-Aduancs.
THE Reading Pa.) Eagle says that in a
car on one of the Eastern railroads a
woman took the cup from the water-cooler
and used it to soak her corns. This little
story is refreshing for those who find them
selves travelling without any drinking-cup
of their own.
| THE horned frog would be good COM
panion for " Old Prob" At least twenty
four hours before the approach of storm
| especially from the north-the little fell
as torpid as in mid-winter. After the
storm has passed he sets to catching the
insects whose wings are useless from the
wetting. (Aass.) Republican
AN item of New England news an
nounces the discovery in Boston railway
station of moribund consumptive whom
nobody owned, adding: d" He had been
sent away from New Milford, Conn,
(where he lived) by the Selectmen, who
feared he would die on their hands, and
had but ninety cents in his pocket" This
l lCPoib Dc uudcScTpluR Oh circuit.
The Selectmen in question might shave
sold his remains for at least $40, which
with the 40 cents in his pocket" would
have netted New Milford $10.9O.-N. Y.
World.
A BIG row seemed imminent in Salt
Lake City, Utah, a few days ago. A
Navajo chief, one of the delegation on d
visit to Brigham Young, paraded the
streets with woman's scalp dangling to
his belt. The scalp was that of a white
woman, and was lined with flannel and
decorated with eagle feathers, the hail
being about two feet long. DIR. Higgins
a fiery Gentle, whose blood boiled al
sight of the trophy Of heartless deed
walked up to the chief and tore the scall
from his belt The Indians and party OF
Mormons, with drawn pistols, threatened
to recapture the trophy, but the Gentiles
armed and itching for fight, swarmed
about Higgins, and a marshal appeared
and ordered the crowd to disperse.