, 1875-10-02
I0ItN'S PREDlCAMENT.
Effect or Matrimonial Letters OH
tho I'utcrnn1 Mind.
Whiting by Gtaalth...A Race Down
Haisted Street,

Ibs famous Tohn --~-- cat1n Hlo1lY into the
1ocsl department Inst evening with sadness and
q limp, and addressed tllo mild reporter wifI,
earnestucee, saving: "Wllcn Ito yon propose 10
cesso this attempt to promote tic commission
Of natriuony; how aoou viii yon STOP this MI
vocaey Of tlcapnnss by Which y0u hRve rrEhct
more than ono unhappy youth into Tho gulf Of
marriage; when do .o,l propose setting tAlugs
tcaumo their natural courso7"
''Slt dosn, Johh." was tho roFly, "Hit down
aud toll ms all abont IT,
Aud then John. lchunR OH chair replied
mo, thank YOU; don't seem to !ccl ycry flcrco
.bout sitting down; it sort Of rasls mt 10 stand
up; but
wAKT TO REASON WITH F0u
minute, u l car. You AcJ you arc nripttng
thoHo .otters about tho duty OF young men To ust
married. nud yon 70 Tniae.l hoycn k,,uls OF blszes
with tho parents Of tho B'ris. asld thuy think
4bsyo's regular cholera at 1narryn' a.gain' on,
aod they walch Tho Pirls Aerccr' II ono. eye hem
and It makes Z tnpro'n unpleasant for tl,e boys.
don't you 600
Of COURSE. tIo mild yaung man condolet Will,
Ioln, aud sesutod lin TINT ruttins of tho Hurt
wa intcndot', Aud clused by asking him to alt
down and
TKIr. Ills sToET,
for there must 10 uiln back III tie moratlzng.
!
mucls atont sitting down In tho usual way, bnt
'tpcso I'll lase n toll snn my story" and then
he Ioppad fnrsart! on tho talla. AMI, testttlR
himself Oh Lib elbows, pontcu fcItl. this doloful
tale:
II expoct you remember about MY writing tn
yon fellows sonlething nsont what mighty poor
luck Id Ind Whenever 1 tried TO yet Kill to
stick,--to coma right al, to tho scratch.
- T. ,;ro,rs: were; Well, it don't mak"
ths 1otsor, and ii waa trte, II It waa
tolerAble rougll IN MO. Well l wns going To
tell sou; I'd haJ aact. cugeod had luck That III
about given up tho hunt altogether, Nfon thu
uthef dny fell ID with Hluut
THE rRETIIEAT LITTLE HiA1SDE .
5ou evor saw.-alWayH VIII a little "oak or
blondes, you know,-nnl kind Of got llsrtiuE
with her, and finally saw sler navoraf tines o.,
The Streets, and 1 got to talking With hor, and
finally went homo With her. .
"Wlere did she llyo, you ua57 Why, AWAY
out By the btoch-Yards: 80 AZ far ~ you can for
5ccnts, then walk . piece. Nlce lsolIse when
1ou got tlofo, small but neat md urstty-~anrl
bad father; htg n,an., long whlakets. haua
Looked tlbo oi,e VI those big ledgors, volso like
bass drum ksud of rough, gr!zzy old codBer.
She ditnt hive my mother: didn't t1ood nny III
ought to haye lcon enough fol. any gisl. Well.
1xeut to rec tue giti aud tho Old man the
rts 3 droyer, by the wav) aeyera! times.
sod uecd to buy beer for lin and carry
~ carame!a for hcr, until flnally thu
81 man ho walked cut q piece wEA mo
when was going for car ono ntght, nlll 10
raid how he'd hnrlt Al1 daughter 1esdinE them
lstte1s about marriage iu t'nE TRIBUNE lutu and
lo.s Of sAen, and bow he'd canyht her writing
one Just like tho rest aud l'o'd tnado up hB mind
SECT YooL1snNEss had TO ne gToPpEp.
md 10 kind Of thought l was at tic bottom OF
It somehon, 10 ho'd made up h1s mint Tint he'd
t.y md worry xloug without any 1nuro Of my
uftArf Ht,1ika &oe &1aS S&11 unsI
W., but couldn't budgo him hair; 30 1went
"well tho gsl, eho thought sho maa perAe-
cuted, Of oDHrHo, 10 sho WrO,G tuD a couple Of
prsttJ nca letters, and iu tho Inst ono Hhe said
30. Tho Old uian ~as soiny away after cattle,
snd she'd like to 500 mo il Id come up Iuoslny
uigLt; 10, llRe blamed informal Ahs, l wont.
Qfcouse lad d beautiful tilI,u, aud sla vas IA
uka u ever you saw, and about Iosen o'clock
~ as!sting on tue aofa talking to lor. when
Ihsatd ths back door opcn. Rud then thought,
Ia considerable lo4H than = R,fEulo, tbat
IT wAa TIE OLD MAN.
"And by the pride Of l.hzarns 1t wan him.
Oteourse made q lively Jump for the door. A,ld
,uan coming III the other door with pitcnfork.
II didut say much to him Or the Erl, wa4
TO busy. and dou't know how that gate opens
ahet, but Jest lit over that fcnco liko uop-
psH, and struck for tho road aud catne away
ssue t"ay boon too,-usghsy Boop, tell you.
i Ut Nas good iaoo for about block. then
ths Old man gained on me, because stumbled,
aud hs got near enough 10 prod me twco before
i lgos under way, anil thata
wur DON'T GALE ABOUT s1rT1Sa Dowx.
"Dy tue limo got turIiBa into llalstea street
md not OF the ntrnIght road, got right away
from ti1c old man, aud he see It, anu tueu lie be-
Gsa to heller like bull. aul sonle gors Of
policeman rau out OF saloon aud blazed away
ii me, nid hnothor old fool pegged
asay 1t tue with rochs, mud, wUtse
ahin that QUO Of them bit mo !; but, after ht
Gos Away, and l had to walk away over to State
.'fe4s before could get car, aud I've boon 80
!eooldn't ait donn eyar since. beside getting
blood al oEor nv light broeehes.'
And shan Joha Strengthened himsof up pain
tall1. aud, bringing his hand down on tue tabls
xxiaA tesoundlng waaok, ho vowed before alt
W peNetn TINT bB that ho woutd mover 60 10
~ Of 90 with, anether Gis!; but. biess hin
20 tendsr heart, boil 10 Ii another fix iu les4
tlsn tso WookH.