American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1875-08-14
MULTUM IN PARVO.

|
SARATOGA has only one Duke this sea
son.
THE bat now flies much in sportin.
circles.
If "a stitch in time saves nine" will
double stitch save eighteen?
A wOMAN's name leads the list in tn
Boston Directory for 1875.
NEARLY all the horses nowadays max
the quickest time on record
THE person who says new broom
sweeps cleann ever tried it, that's all
THERE are less than 900 900 words il
the official report of the Beecher trial
THE cost of remembering a man can b,
counted by the price of his monument
ANNOUNCEMENT of the death of do.
by marine reporter: Another bark lost
A VIRGINIA horse deliberately drowned
himself, which demonstrates that that hors,
| may be an ass.
SOUTH AMERICAN soldiers have had theil
pay raised to eight cents per day, and now
look out for war.
HANDKERcHIEF filtration, to be success
full, must have fool on either side of the
street to make the motions.
| A MAN being commiserated with on ac
count of his wife's running away, said
Don't pity me till she comes back again. 81
THE free-excursion system in Baltimore
has much reduced the death rate among
the poor children of that city this sum
mer.
THE bank robbers are at work again
after their summer vacation and the sound
of the exploding torpedo is heard in the
land.
THERE are not as many old fools in the
world as young fools, but there is more
hope for one who belongs to the latter
| class
THIS will be an unusual month in that
there Will be two moons, making it the
most moonshiny month known for seven
teen years.
"UNDER some circumstances glass is
liable to break - is the way timid grocer
warns the public not to punch their elbows
through his showcase.
THE Washington Chronicle claims to
have never yet had a slur against bald
headed men, but there's a good reason for
tall its editors are ld-headed.
ALL butchers are not hard-hearted as
has been asserted. One of the craft in
San Antonio cut his throat the other day
because a girl of sixteen made faces at
him.
The exultation of the New York ed
itors over the prospect of a poor water
next year shows clearly that they intend
to be present.
A GOOD many things that would seem
silly in broad daylight sound beautifully
in the moonlight. Likewise many ro-
mantle lady killer at night is gibbering
fool in the daytime.
THERE was boy in Maine year or
two ago who could pronounce the name
of every town in the State, but of course
he died. His own parents knew from the
first that he would die.
THIS is the season when Death perches
himself on the sickle-bar and rides around
the field with the mowers and reapers
looking for snakes, toads, small children
and an occasional man.
NEATNEss, simplicity and durability |
are what are wanted in wives as much as
anything nowadays. When the first two
qualities are lacking, however, as little of
the third as possible is desired.
A MAINE paper says that there isn't q
man in Portland who wouldn't tell de- |
liberate lie for three cents. Three cents?
Three cents? Well, money is great
emptation.-Detrott Free Press.
THE man who has spent weeks to train
and tutor fifty head of cabbages may not |
say word when he gets up some morn
ing and finds six cows in the garden, but |
heart within a week.-Detroit Press.
If you are going to travel in the Indian
Territory you should provide yourself
with plug of tobacco. Alonzo Davis,
from New England, was killed by some
miners the other day because he couldn't
furnish them with a chew of the weed.
AMoNG other Improvements introduced
in the United States Assay Office in Wall
street, New York, is pair of balances to
weigh gold and other precious metals.
Their capacity is equal to 10000 ounces,
Or over 81 ,00O,0 600 worth of gold, and the
scale is sensitive to one-tenth of a grain
THE insanity dodge for criminals has
been elevated to the status of fine art as
by the case of woman in
Massachusetts who attempted to shoot
ioctOr for refusing to marry her. 1t was
evident that she was sane-because she
missed him. If she had killed him she
would have been acquitted on the ground
Of insanity. In either case she wholly es-
,apes punishment.
THE Taunton (Mass.) Gazette tells of
Toung man who recently conceived the
brilliant idea of popping the question by
me to the idol of his heart, bearing
imply his name and this character: &C ="
His feelings can be imagined on receiving
~ return mail card inscribed most en-
rgetically: 1" ~ When last seen he had
hccked his collar-box for Chicago, and
vas inquiring the price of through tickets
o the West.
AN amusing story is related of Repre-
entative-elect Walker, of the Twenty
linth District of New York A few days
go he was seated on a porter's truck in
ront of hotel in Corning, when a lady
ravcler, mistaking him for the porter,
him to carry her sachel to the
Iepot He readily complied, and on reach
ng the, lady's destination bandly de-
lined to receive compensation, and with ,
graceful bow left his companion amazed
I the disinterested politeness of her
porter"