The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1875-02-04
That Lightning Rod Agent Again.

The man who put up the lightning rods DC
the Conrt House in a neighboring village,
thinking it was a private residence, has got
into another scrape, and this time On account
Of living. Here is the adventure:
Keyser had lightning rods placed upon his
harm three or four years ago !; but during last
summer the building was struck by, lightning
and burned. When he got the new barn done,
man came around with q red wagon, and
wanted to sell him set of Bolt & Burnams
patent lightning rods.
81 believe not" said Keyser, Il had rods on
the barn at the time Of the =" 49,
ri know" exclaimed the agent. III know
YOU had, and very likely that's the reason you
were struck. Nothin's more likely to attract
lightnin' than worthless rods =,
'Bow do you know they were worthless T.
"Why, was drivin' by yer in the spring
and I seen them rods, and | says to myseil,
that barn'll be struck some time, ,-but there's no
use in tryin' to convince Mr.. Keyser 80 l
didn't cali. I knowed it,because they had IRON
tins. A rod with iron tips Is no Dettern q
clothes prop TO ward off lightnin'."
saThe man who sold them to me said they
had platinum tips" remarked Keyser.
"Ah this is wicked world, Ar. Keyser.
You can't be too cautious Some OF oeese yer
agents lie like . gas meter. It's awful, slE.
They are wholly uRtrustworthy. Ihen rous 90 Z
was the most ridicklus sham l eves see 4
regular gouge. They want worth the la1or5e
took to put 'em up. They want, noW' THAT'S
the honest truth"
"What kind do you oferT' ,.,.
swell, sir, Pve got the only genuine hght-
MIN rod that's made. It's constructed on
scientific principles. Professor Huxley sayu it's
sure to run off the electric fluid every time.
Twisted charcoal iron, glass insulators, eight
points on each rod warranted solid platinum.
We give a written guarantee with each rod.
Never had house struck since we began to
offer this rod to the public. Positive fact ct
The lightnin'll play all around sFhouse Wlsh
one of 'em and never touch it. a thunder
storm that would tear the bowels out OF the
American continent, would leave your house
as safe as polar bear in the middle OF an ice
berg. Shall run you one up2@o - --=----
II don't know" said Keyser, musingly.
'I'll put you up one cheap, and then you
will have somethin reliable. Somethln there's
no discount on - .,-f~. RI ,,,,,~e. .~
"You say the old rod vas a fraud /" -.
"The deadliest fraud you ever heard OF: 1t
hadn't an ounce of platinum within q mile OF
it. The man that sold it ought to be prosecu-
ted, and the fellow that put it up. without IN
sustors should be shot. It's too BAD the iarm-
erS Snoald De gOuSeu III 'hio ooi VI veg. o.,
"And Bolt & Burnam's rod is not fraud II
GA fraud? Why, really, my dear sir, just
cast your eye over Professor Huxley's letter
and these certificates, and remember that we
give sorittes guarantees positive protection,
of course"
"Just cast your eye over that" said Keyser,
handing him a piece of paper.
"Wel1, upon my word !. This is indeed some
what-that is to say it is, as it were-it looks,
it looks little, like one of our own certlfl-
Gates P' - -d Q = -. 80,
"Just so," said Keyser. 'That old rod was
one of Bolt & Burnam's. You sold it to my
son;in-law; you gave this certificate you
swore the points we're platinum, and your man
gput it up" =, ws
\ 'qPhen Z suppose wecan't trade ~ 58l
| "Welf, / should think not,' said Keyser
7 Whefeupon the man mounted the red wagon
and moved on.