The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1875-04-08
BUBBLES.

Now, boys, is the time to hunt up your fish |
lines, go barefooted, and rob birds nests
alarming extent.
The season for stonebruises and stubbed toes
is here.
One sehicken has been appointed Minister to
the United STATES from Russia. Spring is the
proper time to import schickens.
They have had an important embezzIement
case in Cincinnati. The miscreant's name was
Murphy, he drove q cart, and the amount was
thirty-two dollars.
Outrageous! There will be special tax on
worms after the Ist of May. We suppose collie
and diarrhoea will be the next victims of Ratli-
cal oppression.
| ''Bnb, what's the news this morning."
! "Good news. Sam
| ais your mother better"
mo, she's worse. But Coley had pups last
night"
| 1t is said that the Spanish word ''bonanza''
means fair wind, or calm. 1t has oecasioned
a good deal of wind in the American newspa-
per- during the past few weeks. We're waiting
for the calm.
Some down town Americans held a Martha
! Washington Tea Party.t the other night, and the
air was full of such patriotic songs as "Rhine
Wine Charley, "Shamus O'Brien,'' and "Kai-
ser, DON you want to puy tog."
When Dutchman introduces himself the
Count Won Squabblestein, late of Hesse Darn
sladt, and We afterwards ascertain that he is
the driver OF a night-cart in this country, our
faith in the stability of human greatness is con-
siderably shaken.
A gushing poet exclaims:
.sThe blushing sunshine lay across her breast,
the blushing clover blossoms kissed her feet.
The sunshine may have had a soft thing of it.
but would hate to have been the clover bios
SONS.
1t was touching sight; it occurred on las
Monday-election day. A "saddle-colored mig
GER leisurely strolling up Main street, ,wher
, he met by one of the Democratic candidates
, who bowed. engaged The "nigger" in converse
ton for a moments then handed him a buncl
of tickets patted him on the back, and turned
: away with a satisfied smile, just as though mig
ger equality and civil rights were the nices
things in the world.
5 Young Montrose, while in the country though
to convince his girl that he was superior be
Ing. by airing his education in the presence o
G herself and her grandma, (he has just "wen
e through one of our modern colleges) and will
- the following result:
sit must be pleasant, grandma, to sit thus, IL
: the evening of life, and watch the bright ray
d of the moon"
h Eyes, I've seed er raise now fur nigh abou
sixty year"
GAS was saying, grandma, the bright rays @
e the moon, as she sheds her mellow light around
;, like mild phosphorescence-"
= ~ never seed any O. thet stuff ye call phospe
essence. Some new tangled medicine, s'post
, When don't feel reg'lar, gin'rally take salts.
l. Exit NIontrose for stroll "by moonligh
J.. alone"
s Bro. Creel, of the Guyandotte Banner is spite
# full towards US, ever since that opening OF tn
/ Biggs House, in Portsmouth. The trouble was
we unconsciously exposed Creel on that occa
L sion. After calling out those "tinctured lemon
e ades of which he speaks, we, of course havin
no money, depended on the gallantry of Bro
Crze to pay for the drinks. But we were dis
u appointed. We then, asked him to loan US
/. quarter when, after a blank look, he haule
q out diIa pidated wallet, and laid solemnly o
the counter-two nickels, pearl button, a FIN
tooth comb. and three lead pencil stubs, but th
. barkeeper said ''Nein." We finally comprC
n missed with the hard-hearted Dutchman, b
. trading him a new paper collar and a broke
acl-knife, which We borrowed of Creel. Cree
l. must forgive us, for we never would have tol
II it in the world. -~------