The Rutland daily globe. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1873-1877, 1875-10-16
[From the New York World.l
MEMOIRS OF THE UTINAM CLUB.

How A Reverend Humbug was Exploded.
Ipresent you herewith an accurate his
tory of the life and career of the Rev.
Adoniram Blead, A. NJ, NJ. d., S. T. d.,
a member of the Utinam Club, just resign
ed at my suggestion. / have been nquir-
ing industriously into this persons antece-
dents for several weeks, with the result in
view which l have stated, but the partic.
uars of his eventful career are so surpris-
ing, and withal so instructive, that cam
not refrain from making them public, for
the public's good. / found out about Blead
by means of patient, persistent inquiry,
and believe the pursuit of this consum-
mate actor has revealed a new means of
livelihood
Blead was a member OF the Utinam Club
at the time when first became acquainted
with that cherished establishment, and from
the beginning felt an unconquerabe aver
sion to him. His ground of membership
was an incurable disease with the appear
ance of perfect health, making him sus-
pected among men. He certainly had the
appearance of perfect health, though he
was at least sixty years old. A tall man,
with shoulders that Rugged his chest, like
chilly age embracing the embers of fire;
form rather lean and why, with long limbs,
large bones, big hands, with bony, red
knuckles; ferret eyes, green and watchful;
bristly, projecting eye brows, black hair,
scant gray whiskers and a notified red
complexion on cheeks tough and dry as
corned beef. He wore black beaver hat
with broad brim, and his costume was OBJ
trusiyely clerical in all it's details but
something in his manners and everything
in his harsh voice, broad and rancorous in
its upper tones, but apt to fall into hoarse
cunning whisper, betrayed that the rever-
end Adoniram was not born a gentleman,
nor capable of elevating himself to that
stature of nobility. l have often been
amused at the way in which our delightful
Mr.. Weeburn used to withdraw into hini-
self when Blead was present-the genial
minister was more afraid of his clerical
brother than even of the fair sex or the
sound of his own voice.
Adoniram Blead was born in Vermont
on some frost-btten December day in 1918.
His father was a Nova Scotian Scotchman,
who kept way-side tavern, and his mother
professional midwife. When Adoniram
was about twelve years old, and able to
make himself useful about the tavern,
holding and watering horses, backing boots
and the like, his parents came to sudden
grief, for his father died of delirium tre-
mems and his mother went to Jail upon sus-
picion of helping herself too literally from
the bureau drawers of her patients in the
straw. Adoniram, without waiting for the
result of his mothers trial, levanted with a
horse peddler who came that way, and for
several years pursued the business of stock
drover. When about eighteen years old
he met with an accident which was the
means of making his fortune. He was
tossed and gored by an unruly OK in vii
lage in Western Pennsylvania, was picked
up for dead and taken INTO the office of one
Phelim Mcguire, NJ. D., practitioner who
had recently settled in the town. Mcguire
found that nearly all the bones in his body
were broken, but still professed his deter
mination to save him. Adoniram, after a
few days, knew quite as well as his doctor
that he was not hurt beyond some bruises
and Commissions of pretty severe sort; but
he made up his mind to help the doctor
play his little game, and between the two
first class miracle was cooked up that got
Mcguire into practice and gave Adoniram
an easy time Of 1t for several months.
When Blead was tired Of bandages, splints
and crutches and of being the especial won
der of all gobemouches of a small town,
he gracefully retired, with $500 of Maguire's
money in his pocket, and a certificate from
the doctor to the effect that he had been
reading medicine with him for year.
Thus armed, he went to Philadelphia,
where, after an interview with champion
vender of patent medicines then beginning
to advertise himself into notoriety, Blead
entered one Of the medical colleges as Sec
ond year student, and in due course was
graduated M. ID, In return, Mr.. Squills,
the chemist, was furnished with most
flaming certificate as to the ansxampled
virtues of his panacea by Adoniram Blead,
M, D., who had tested its efficacy in in
Vulnerable instances. The performance
was crude and jejune, for those were Blead's
salad days, when he was green in judgment
but 1t had wonderful success.
Blead now went West, and, after prac-
tising medicine for while, got himself
converted at a camp-meetinR, and began TO
turn his attention to theology and religion.
About the same time that he began to
have symptoms of bronchitis and tubercu-
lar consumption. He grew pale and ema-
ciated, was troubled with a dry, hacking
cough, and complained of night-sweats and
pain in his breast. He treated himself, the
doctors of the neighborhood treated him,
he went to New York to take the advice of
the most eminent members of the profess
ion, but all in vain. He grew steadily
worse, and it was universally admitted that
poor Brother Blead's life of usefulness was
ahaut IN ha uinpad in tho Ind n,,t a..