davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1873-1877, 1875-12-06
RooKToap. aocK ISLAND Z sT. Louls 3. 3

GOING SOUTH TRAINS LEAVE
At $40 q. IN. and $3.50 p. m. daily
ARRIvE FROM ST. LOUIS
At $50 a m. daily, and s:45 p. m.
STERLING TRAINS LEAVE
At TOO q. m and $3.50 p. m.
ARRIVE FROM STERLING
Att: q. m. and o 80 p. m.
The daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1873-1877, 1875-12-06
GOAL VALLEY MINING CO.'S rsAINs.

WEE VA~@@~1A@A AH@'~@NN VT H~sA~@@N~'
LEAVE. ARRIVE.
i7:05 A. NJ. 1880 A. M
1900 NJ. $3.50 P. N.
The daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1873-1877, 1875-12-06
The 9ailg Arens.
Railroad Time Table.
PEORIA & aocK ISLAND RAILWAY.

SHORTEST ROUTE TO THE EAST AND SOUTH.
Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1875-05-20

ASAS JosE printer received the fol-
lowing from his girl: MAY l git
yanked out Of bed a, mi,lnite by cuss
like Theydore Tilton. m carried up a
million pare Of stairs, in ever sese to
luv yu. jim"
Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1875-05-20

EyKS TIE OLD WOMAN LIKEp rik
PAEo,ysNlL.--A young man. son OF
well.to-do merchant Of Topeka. Kansas,
Lai tho misfortune 10 become deeply
enamourcd Of o lady. and after q very
short courtship, proposed and was ae-
cepted. But what was his surprise one
evening, when about entering the parlor
with tho uncerimonious freedom OF
lover, ut discovering his inamorate upon
n sofa, her arms around the neck OF n
youth, AMI her faco in such close prox-
unity to his ~ TO convince our hero that
matters were fearfully in earnest. In
raro and modification he rushed home
ward, Just in time TO surprise his eldest
sister squeezing to Kill young disciple
Of blackstone. Nearly frantic at such
disclosures among people whom he hal
believed to bc honest, he made . boil
dash for the larn. running directly
upon his mother kissing the family
physician. who hal stole upon her as
she was looking after tho poultry. This
was too much. With a groan. the young
man turned. undiscovered. away. and
resolved TO pass the night with his srief
beneath the shelter Of another roof.
The morning encouraged him. however.
and. dew drenched AMI sorrowful. he
returned home. when his mother. with
true maternal solicitudc. questioned him
as 10 his sad looks. whercupon he 70
lated the inconsistency Of his fair be-
trothej. lie received in reply. the
gratifying intelligence that she was a
good Tor nothing miserable huzzy. aud
he must not speak to or notice her
AGAIN
Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1875-05-20

OuR country's little wine and liquor
bill last year footed up the mere bag
atelle of four hundred million dollars.
and this doesn't include tho wear and
tear Of lamp posts either.--PhitsisiPAh
Tunes
Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1875-05-20

Ihavs eosstsatly on hand large and CON-
plcts sssortnsnt Of everything In the wsy OF
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

tumbler is. the greenbacks When you want
a long long drink you pour into this tumbler
as much out of the other one as you want
If you want short drink you pour some out
of this tumbler into the other one. LISA big
thing Mr.. Kelley was in despair. The
barkeeper continued (:
i" You see l want to return to whisky
basis, but wish to do SO without injury to
the business interests of the country. Now,
if you wait till the water evaporates and leaves
the whisky"
Here Mr.. Kelley smote the counter with
his cane. sLook here" he shouted, " in
spite of your expanding the volume Of that
drink, and humbugging me with your idiotic
interconvertible cocktail, and talking about
returning to whisky basis without derang-
ing my interests, don't you see, you bowling
ass, that that's the same weak, thin, diluted,
mawkish, tasteless, abominable slush, all the
time. want an immediate return to whisky
resumption and no steps backward"
"Keerect, Judge" replied the barkeeper,
as he threw the inflated cocktail into the
sink. "we'n repudiate this, as they always
do" And he mixed another cocktail on a
whisky basis. "But," he said, dispose you
hadn't had another Is cents, OF that all the
whisky in the house had been in that cock
tail, whered you have been, eh?"
Mr.. Kelley smiled, and invited the barkeep-
er to join him. The latter complied and took
a little gin, syrup and bitters. Mr.. Kelley
drank off his cocktail, paid for the drinks,
and taking a Glove, was about to depart, when
an afterthought seemed to occur to him. He
turned back and said
"See here, Johnny, you're smart young
fellow, and I've enjoyed your conversation
very much. But then, you see, the ah the
financial problem is thing that people can't
exactly understand in all it's qualifications
without special education, training, you
know. Of course, it affects all people, but all
people can't understand it it isn't to their
interest that they should. If everybody knew
all about it there'd be no Kelleys and Logans
and inter- Oceans and Enquirers It's like
cocktails, you know. Every man drinks
them, but every man can't mix them. If
they could, ther'd be no barkeepers. Under
stand? And, Johnny, perhaps you'd better
not say anything about this little conversation
of ours to anybody. You see, perhaps it
might injure the business of the house. and
the proprietors don't like to have politics dis
cussed. Goodbye"
$50 long," remarked the barkeeper, and
as the judges form vanished up the stairway,
he closed one eye respectfully and took three
jig steps with an expression of the deepest
reverence.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

A NEWSPAPER MAN.---He had sec iy
clothes on when he appeared before the
Detroit police court. He had a hungry look.
He had an anxious air and nm empty wallet.
"Young man, who are you, and how camo
you to falter by the wayside ?" asked the
court
lie said lie was reporter looking for
situation. He had been looking for llaco
for months and months, but all applications
were unsuccessful. All the situations seemed
taken up, and he thought some of turning his
attention to driving omnibus.
"Would you tell lie ? /" asked the court.
NO, SIR"
Would you oxaggerate p"
+" No, SIR
Would you perycrt Or deceive? ;"
mo, SIR
Then am convinced that you are not
journalist, added his honor q You are some
fraud, travelling around ON cheek, and I'll
put you to work. The sentence is three
MONTHS
It's pretty hard, sir, for an innocent man
to be sent up" protested the prisoner.
~ never heard of but one such case, and
never believed that" was the reply, as he
was waived into the corridor.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15
TAKING CASTOR OIL.

II ssaz
She had had her mind made up fof1SSEwd or
three days that the boy needed some castor
OIL hut she knew that she must approach him
geatly. She placed the bottle where he could
sec it, and when he turned up his nose she
said
:. It's just like honey, my darling"
He seemed ito doubt her word, and she
continued
IF you'll take some I'll let you go to the
circus.''
elbow much ?'' he cautiously inquired.
"Oh, only spoonful, just one spoonful, 4"
as she uncorked the bottle.
And you'll give me some sugar besides P''
''Of course villa big lump"
He waited until she began pouring from
the bottle, and then asked:
And you'll give me ten cents, too?
:. Yes, of course"
And you'll buy me a shoo-fy kite Z" he
went on, seeing his advantage.
81 guess So"
"No kite-no ile,o he said, as he drew
back.
swell, I'll buy you the kite" she replied,
filling the spoon clear up.
And a velocipede ~
g I'll think of it."
You can't think no castor oil down me !"
he exclaimed, looking around for his hat.
- Here--I will, or I'll tease father to, and
l know he will. Come, now, swallow it
down"
"And you'll buy me goats"
EYES,
And two hundred marbles ="
"Yes. Now take it right down."
"And coach dog?"
81 can't promise that
"All right--no dog, no ile."
swell, I'll ask your father"
And you'll buy me pony?"
"Oh, couldn't do that. Now be good
boy and swallow it down.
sob, yes, I'll swallow that stuff, will +"
he said, as he clapped on his hat. " You
may fool some other boy with circus ticket
and lump of brown sugar, but it'll take a
hundred dollar pony to trot that castor oil
down my throat !"
And he went out to see If the neighbor's cat
had been caught in the dead-fall he had set
for her.-Detrou Free Press,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15
POETRY
soMEHoR or OTHER.

Life has a burden for every ones shoulder
None can escape from its trouble and care
Miss il in 5outh and twill when we're older,
And fit us as close as the garments we wear.
Sorrow comes into our homes unlimited,
Robbing hearts of its treasure of song
Lovers grow cold and friendships are sighted,
Yet somehow other worry along.
Midst the sweet blossoms that smile in our faces
Grow the dark weeds that would poison and blight
And e'en in the midst of earth's beautiful places
There's always something that isn't Just right.
Yet oft from rock we may pluck gay flower,
And drink from spring in desolatc waste
They come to the heart like heavenly dover,
And naught is so sweet to the eye or the taste.
Everyday toll is an everyday blessing.
Though poverty's cottage and crust we may share
Weak Is the back on which burdens pressing
But is the heart that is strengthened by prayer
Somehow other the pathway grows brighter,
Just when mourn there none to befriend
Hope In the heart makes the burden seem lighter,
Aud somehow or other We get to the end
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

PoLfrExEss IN GnEAr Mrv --Politcness is
always the mark of good breeding, and SOME
of the greatest men have been noted for their
courtesy. Many of them have owed the
popularity that was recognition of their
greatness, 10 no small measure to their con-
sideration Of others. The following is re-
lated Of the late Edward Everett Many
years ago, the errand boy employed by q.
publishing house in a gseat citys,was sent to-
procure from Edward Everett the proof
sheets of n book which he had been examii. !
ing. The boy entered the vast library, lined
from floor to ceiling with books, in fear and
he stood ia awe of the famous
man, and dreaded to meet him. But Mr..
Everett, turning from the desk where he was
writing, received the boy with reassuring
courtesy, babe him sit down, chatted kindly
as he looked for the proofsheets, and asked
" Shall put paper round them for you :"
rs politely as IL his visitor were the President.
The boy departed la very comfortable franc
Of mind, He had been raised IN his own cs-
teem by Mr. Everett's kindness, and has
never forgotten the lesson 1t taught him.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

MEN AND THEIR FAcEs.--The life and
works of Dante tally with his face. In the
face of Cromwell the great frontal base of his
brain, as left in his mask, and the power of
his lower jaw, are the upper and neither mill
stones of his history. Tn moderate portraits
Garrison's lamb-like face has abolition ;
Grants the grip, fighting it out on his line If
it takes all Summer, and leaving not a crows
ration in the valley letting US have peace in
unconditional surrender.
A true portrait is that intofrigible page OF
history which neither justice nor mercy inval-
idates. 1t is the dead-level of man mid fluc-
tuating fashion and tickle opinion. Our ma
tional portraiture, though likely to be hung
for while in the Rogues' Gallery, is incor-
ruptble history every truly rendered face
proclaiming, Know all men by these pres
ents, as unlying as light itself. A good like
ness is rogue's worse enemy. 1t will surely
betray him, and anon retort on his alter ego,
" I told you SOL God made man in his own
human image. So the soul creates its outer
shell in likeness to itself. If the man is hid
in his statue, it is the duty of the artist to
pick him out.-Scribnsr, for September.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

A Chicago lover went to visit his girl one
evening, and found her cool and distant.
After a few moments standing, he remarked
that he guessed he'd go. "Oh!" said she,
starting from beautiful condition of semi-
Inconsistencies, "won't you take chair?"
" Well, don't care if do was his reply,
and he took the chair, thaking her kindly,
and carried it home. He says it is good
chair, made of walnut, with stufing and
green cover--just what he wanted.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

BE CHEERFUL" Be cheerful says
man who is easy in ais circumstances, missing
no loved face at the table, or by the hearth.
But does he ever consider how hard it NAV
be to be cheerful when the heart aches and
he cupboard is empty, and thore are little
fresh graves in the churchyard. How dim-
cult for one man to understand another in
such different circumstances How easy to
say ssBe cheerful!'' How hard he would
find it to practice were be stripped ofall life's
brightness?
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

The Independent Beige gives some curious
statistics relative to the consumption of wood
in France. A large quantity Of soft wood is
used for making toys; and to give an idea of
this trade, it will be sufficient to take one ar
ticle alone, childrcu's drums, of Which in
Paris alone 100000 are sold every month
The total number made annually in France is
estimated at 30,000,00O while considerable
quantity of wood must be consumed to supply
60, 000, 900 of drumsticks.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

REPA1Rs.-"I am SO lame from the railroad
crash of last week can hardly stand" said a
limping, hobbling chap.
"Well, then, hope you intend to sue for
damages" said his friend.
Damages No, no; have had damages
enough by them ; if sue for anything it will
be for repairs"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

Recently two inkstauds and a pen were dug
up at Pompeii. The pen is of metal, and
made almost similar in shape to our quill
pens SO in the writing line the moderns are
not so far ahead after all.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

GAS to being conflicted with the govt, "
said Mrs. Darlington, "high living don't
bring it on. 1t is incoherent in some families,
and is handed down from father to son. Mr..
Hammer, poor soul, who has been SO long Ill
with it, disinherited 1t from bis wife's grand
mother"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

A village pedagogue, in despair with
stupid boy pointed to the letter A and asked
him if he knew it. "Yes, SIR" . VEIL
what is it?'' 81 know him very vel BY
sight, but rat me il can remember his
name"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

Time and iteration are elements of educa-
tion. The greater part Of every science must
be mastered before its use and beauty dawn
upon the mind. The child sees no meaning
in the alphabet. Definitions and technical
tiles take up the early portion of every branch
Of study. What child does not understand
is to him an abstraction and anything in
which he is not interested he Is inapt at un-
derstanding. Is 1t strange, then, that with
his halffnislied education and half-developed
faculties he should make absurd mistakes p
To condemn him and his teacher for errors
committed while his ideas are in this formative
condition, before his mature judgment has
given his knowledge shape and symmetry, Is
as unjust as it would be to declare baby de-
void of beauty because its little body is out Of
proportion to the size of its head. -" Nation
al Teachers Monthly" A. S. Barnes & Co.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15
MISCELLANY.
COCKTAILS AND CURRENCY.

A PRACTICAL ILLUSTRATION OF THE INFLA-
TI0N IDEA.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15


THE LORDS AND COMMONS. Grace Green.
lean capital, has been looking at the lawnial-
ers of Britain. She gives some of her impress
sons In letter to the New York Times, as
follows: "We had very fine opportunity
of seeing the House of Lords and Commons.
In the former we witnessed an entire session.
1t was brief but it was solemn. One feels
somewhat depressed and dominated by the
dignity and decorum, the wigs and the wool
sack, the presence of real lords and dukes,
though they be in undress, and a real throne,
though in an eclipse of linen covers. There
was a debate of some sort-if such a courtly
The noble lords spoke slowly and lowly, with
gently rising infections. An air of aristocrat-
ic repose brooded over the stately delibera-
tions. picture some of our Democratic SELL
ators seated on those slippery benches, and
thought how they would play the mischief
with the pomps and ptoprieties Of the high
toned English Of the august assembly 1t made
me shudder Sumner would have been at
home here and Fielinghuysen at case, and not
noble among them all, with pedigree as
long as his rent roll, could have shown as tru-
ly lordly as Daniel Webster. He would have
brought if not the thunders of Olympus into
this dull chamber, some grand reverberations
from Bunker HILL In the gallery of the House
of Commons we spent an hour or two very
pleasantly, peering through the grating and
listening to the speeches, the Jaw avis"
ooh, oh's," and "hear hears" It was a
dull session. Lord Harrington spoke very in
differently, and with much hesitation and
Mr.. Disrael replied in plain, dry statement,
unrelieved by a fash of eloquence or flower
of rhetoric.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

LOCUST EATING.-We read in the Bible,
that the food of John the Baptist was q locust
and wild honey" A great deal of pains has
been taken by commentators to prove that it
was not what we call locusts, but the fruit of
the wild carob tree, that John ate with the
honey that he found in the wilderness where
he lived
travelled in Arabia, or found rest and shelter
in an Arabs tent, and been guest at his
hospitable board, would thus judge what the
Bible means by .'locusts." In Turkey
Persia, Arabia, and all that region of country,
locusts-genuine, bona fde locusts-have been
eaten from remote antiquity and to this day,
they form an important item of food used by
the common people. The Bedouins collect
them in immense quantities, and, after a
partial drying, pack them in sacks. Then at
their convenience, when the season for col
lecting is over, they steam the insects in close
vessels over a hot fire, winnow them in broad
baskets to remove the legs and wings, and
then pulverize between fiat stones. When
wanted for food, they are only moistened
with little water, just as the Arabs do in
preparing their dateiiour, and then the repast
is all ready.
The Turks eat 1ocusts in the same way, and
by very many other Orientals they are regard
ed as the choicest dainties.
The Moors boil or fry them, seasoning with
salt, pepper and vinegar; and they pronounce
them even superior to quails and pigeons. The
Hottentots make from the eggs delicious
soup they also roast the locusts over slow
fire, and eat them as we do caramels or bon
first from necessity, when deprived of all
other food ; "but strange to say, grew daily
more fond of them, and at last preferred them
to shrimps or oysters. st Nicholas for
September.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1875-09-15

An open letter--O.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17

WHERE Is Villain Brig
ham, owner of the race-horse " Foster"
challenges any horse in Oregon or
Washington Territory to run two-mile
heats on the second day of the coming,
Oregon State Fair for $5, 200 u side,
81 900 to be deposited with the Secre-
tary of the Agricultural Society by Sep
TENDER LIST, the balance on the day of
the race; OF he will challenge Osceola
to run two races of $500 each, the
first to be the best three in five, and
the second, two mile heats. The first
to take place on the second day of the
Fair and the second on the sixth day.
If the challenge is accepted, the money
on the second race must be put up be-
fore the day set.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17
FRIENDSHIP, LOVE AND truth.

Three sunny islets on Life's river.
Three golden arrows in lifes culver;
Three stars that never fade or dim,
Three notes that an gels love to hymn;
Three charms that guard the heart from sor-
row,
Three whispers of a brighter morrow;
Three links that bind with silken bands.
Three words whose might shall rule all
lands; - i
Three watch wortls on LIES stormy strands.
Three harbors mid eartiI's treacherous sands !;
Three life preservers on Times ocean,
Three voices mid the hearts commotion;
Three fragrant flowers most fair to see,
Three garlands twined around life's tree:
Three gems of pure ETHEREAL light,
Three paths all lovely, smooth and bright;
Three rays of light from Heavens throne,
There naught but happiness is known.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17
V Never were the liberties of til

~ Never were the liberties of the
country in greater peril than at this
moment, says the Baltimore Gazette,
when the so-called representatives of
the people of the country have just
dispersed, and for seven months quite
long enough for mischieD the Execu-
tive power of the country, with its pat
ronage radiating everywhere, is in the
unchecked hands of an INSCRIPTIONS
and ambitious man; one who, as his
friends boast, never knows repulse or
defeat, but goes pounding on" The
peril, in our judgment in some senses,
is greater than it was in that brief leg
islative crisis when the Force bill seemed
likely and the Arkansas resolution I'M
likely to pass. Had either of such I'M
toward results occurred, we should prob
ably have had the commission of some
overt act that might have startled the
people from their apathy. The new per-
il is different one, and comes in much
more subtle form.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17


A LONG WALK.-Mark Grayson, the
actor and author, is about to commence
walk around the world for wager of
$25, 900. The distance is little over
10, 900 miles, and. he must complete the
journey in 600 days, being a daily av-
arage of 80 miles. The route selected
necessitates 1895 miles ocean travel
ing, during which the daily average
must be made on shipboard. Since
February 18th, Grayson has been in &C
tive training in Wilmington, Delaware.
He is said to have made 100 miles in
"a hours. One of his achievements is a
walk of 1, 426 miles, part of the distance
between Richmond, Virginia, and Oma-
ha, Nebraska, in 1868. The distance
was made in 42s days, in which time
he made 1913 campaign speeches for
Seymour and Blair.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17

sgr The proposition to make Gen.
Hancock the Democratic nominee for
the Presidency calls forth this comment
from the Cincinnati Enquirer: Gen.
Hancock is a very clever gentleman,
but the demand for the conversion of
the White House into military barracks
is not as great as it was q few years
ago." No wonder the people have be-
gun to lose confidence in military he
roes.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1875-04-17

STRAWBERRY FESTIVAL. ladies of
the Unitarian Aid Society requests us
to state that they design holding straw
berry festival and fair soon as straw
berries are ripe! If the ladies only
knew with what JUNCTION some of our
friends stow away that kind of fruit,
they would not be 80 cruel as to tantal-
ize them so long before their tastes can
he grati6ed. But ladies, din't you rsth-
er " forcing the season" in making. this
an1noanesas ass,o de yom want 20 get
ahead of somebody else?