Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1875-09-02
miscellaneous.

No good place for Toms and Tab
bies-Cat-alone-ia.
Something that will soon be leaving
us-the leaves.
Bakers are a crusty lot of fellows,
and fond of loafing.
Carpenters are given to vice-they
do 50 much chisclling.
1t doesn't take long for a man with
a small mind to make it mp.
-Croaky croquet players abound in
the West since the recent heavy
rains.
A rain of terror-the widespread
storms among the Western grain
crops.
All honest men will bear watching.
1t is the rascals who cannot stand it.
The only men who don't get out OF
patients in warm weather-the doc
tors.
The salutation among Tammany
Democrats-How does the World
use you?
81 have bought my first last" was
the remark of cobbler when he set
up business for himself
Ought baker to be considered a
needy loafer because he is frequently
seen kneading loaf?
The two most Intellectual things in
the world are undoubtedly a blue
eyed woman's rage and liquor law.
Not strange-that a man with three
"schooners" of lager should find it
hard to navigate when he's half seas
over.
What, laborers' strike in the
heart of the Alps? But they Got
hard treatment from the military,
didn't they?
"How we done it, is the heading of
Duluth newspaper editorial. Send
up some grammars there, quick.
"To bee or not to bee," as the man
said when he got home and found a
swarm of 'em settled on his front
door. knob.
The best explanation yet offered
for the disappearance of Donaldson
and his fellow balloonist is, that they
must have had falling out.
A western paper has this personal
item: "Those who know nice old Mr..
Wilson of this place will regret to
hear that he was assaulted in o bru-
tai manner last week, but was not
killed"
New Haven, Conn.,, has cat which
goes into the water and catches fish,
and her proprietor wants her to have
a family of moro of her kind. He
sees a way of kitten q living without
much labor.
A lady living near Troy has piece
of soap supposed to be hundred
years old. Isn't it astonishing how
long some people can keep soap in
the house and never feel the slight
est temptation TO use it.
A contemporary wonders whether
Cain and Abel ever had the mumps
or the whooping-cough. Very prob
ably. It's certain, at all events, that
their mother had Adam.-Ne,o York
Commegcie1 AdrertiSer.
A foolish young man out West, in
q newspaper office, desires to know
why the police are not turned out in
New York and the thieves put in.
That is exactly what has been done.
Cincinnati Commercial { Ind.
We now have the fact established |
in a court of law that the devil is
personality; and this is, in its way,
great comfort,--PAHo. Press. We
suppose our cotemporary refers to the |
Hprinter's devil" don't it?
A village pedagogue, in despair
with a stupid boy, pointed to the let
ter A and asked him if he knew it.
"Yes, Sir" "Well, what is it?' 81
know him very we'll by sight, Sir
bnt rat me if L can remember his |
name.
A Norrstown boy who found a
pocket-book containing cighty-five
dollars, and returned it to the owner,
refused reward of five cents for his
trouble, explaining that many man
has been ruined by suddenly becom-
ing rich.
eve need the means for organizing
the Democratic party in. this STATE"
said a leading politician. A Western
man responded promptly by tele-
graph; "Will ship to-day one barrel
whisky and one orator; invoice by
mail"
The Seattle Dispatch, Washington
Territory, appearing with deficien-
cy of local news one day last week,
accounted for it by saying that the
day before had been its 'lOcal's" birth
day. Happy spot, where birthdays