The Grange advance., 1875-12-15
SCATTERING NOTES.

QUA UntNU NUlEOs
For fifty years Sarah Ann Cunning.
ham handled the mails at New London, /
Chester county, Pa, but died the other
day spinster.
"What sort of gait do the Democrats
expect to travel this winter?'' asks a
Radical editor. 'Investigate," replies
the St. Louis Times.
The New York Sun thinks the seat
for the war for which Secretary Robson
is preparing the navy will be somewhere
in Wall street, not far from the gold
room.
''1diot!'' exclaimed lady, coming
out of the theater, one evening, as gem
tleinan accidentally stepped OH her trail
ing skirt. "Which one of us 2" blandly
responded the man.
81 can't say as he went to Heaven
remarked Fort Scott citizen of a DC.
ceased townsman, "but he paid a bill of
eleven years standing only the day be-
fore he died, and you can judge for your
SELF"
Charles Bradleigh has directed his
agents to postpone indefinitely all his
lecture engagements in the West. He is
now lying at St. Luke's Hospital in New
York, prostrated by severe illness. Over
work is said to be the cause Of his break
ing down.
A CHILD Of Charles Miller, who lives
in Faribault, was suffocated on the 9Th
inst by smoke, which was caused by
some wood which had been piled near
the stove, catching fire, and which filled
the parcntT absence.
! Perplexed Schneider, who had made a
garment for youth, and found himself
unable to dispose of the surplus fullness
which appeared when trying it on the
young candidate, declared vociferously:
'.De coat is goot! Is no fault of de coat.
De boy is too TIM"
A good deacon making an official visit
to dying neighbor, who was q very
churlish and universally unpopular man,
put the usual question: "Are you willing
to go, my friend!" "Oh, yes" said the
sick man, II am.'' 'sWell'' said the
simple e.mindcd Deacon am glad you
are, for all the neighbors are willing.''
A lady who had been teaching her
little four-year.old the elements of arith-
metic was astounded by his running and
propounding the following problem:
MAMMA, if you had three butterflies,
and each butterfly had bug in his car,
how many butterflies would you have ?"
The mother is still at work on the prob
lem.
Sardou. the author of L'Oncle Sam,
that atrocious libel upon American life,
was recently introduced to an American
woman in Paris. Il am delighted to
make your acquaintance, madame said
the playwright. II should think you
would be glad, NJ. Sardou," was the re.
ply, 'for, to judge by your Uncle SAM
you never met an American lady before"
Theodore Tilton came near knocking
down an Indianapolis hotel keeper for
i addressing him as ''Mr. Beecher." The
unfortunate host meekly explained that
he had got the names mixed up someway,
and that he quite agreed with Mr.. Til.
toms congregation in discrediting the
monstrous story Of his having alienatcd
the affections Of that bad man Beecher's
wife.
Sir Randall Roberts, Baronet, who has
long been known in London society as
frst.class amateur actor, is about to
adopt the stage as a profession. He is
young, handsome, highly accomplished
he was the captain of the Irish eight at
Wimbledon some years ago, he fought in
the Crimea, and be has an idea Of coming
to this country but the question is, "Can
he act out onto the stage?''
A party of Cleveland ladies, going from
house to house in that city, to INQUIRE
after the spiritual health of the inmates,
dropped t'all unbeknownst," into the res.
idence of Rev. DR.. McLaren, Bishop elect
Of Illinois, one day this week, and pro-
pounded to him the stunning inquiry,
'sDo you attend Mr.. Earle's revival meet
ings, and are you positive that you love
the Saviour?''
Fourteen years ago, says the Fond du
Lac Commonwealth, Gen. Bragg could
see two miles through pine forest and
detect one ef the Sixth Wisconsin bows
steal chicken. He had the best eye
sight Of any man in the business. Those
of the regiment who were detected by the
General in those days Of war will be glad
to learn that he has had to resort to the
use Of glasses.
That was shrewd advice of learned
lawyer to pupil, "When the facts are in
your favor, but the law opposed to you,
come out strong on the facts :; and when
the law.is in your favor and the facts op.
posed to you, come out strong on the
law" ''But," inquired the student,