The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1875-08-12

WISE AND OTHER WISE.

WISE AND OTHER WISE.
The four hundred thousand shad sent to
Germany have all died. Gone to meet Isssk
Walton.
stranger got a free dinner of an Ohio
inn-keeper the otter day by claiming to be
Thomas Jefferson.
Here's another reason why Grant should
step aside next year. We are all out OF ex-
presidents.-Hersld.
The sslutstion amosg Tammsny demo-
crats-How does the World use you?-N. Y
Commercial Advertiser.
1t isn't so nice to be a csssowary on the
sands of Timbuctoo as 1t used to be. They re
having tremendous tornadoes throughout
all Australasia.
When man lives so far off as the Detroit
Free Press man he isn't afraid to say: "If
Tom Allen won't fight let him keep still."-
st. Louis Republican.
Spinner is:suggested for state treasurer of
New York. If be should write his name on
the ballots he'd probably get elected, as no.
body would know.-Boston Post.
Indiana reaping machines have com
ner, aud you want to look out for fingers in
your -four barrels.-Detroit Free Press.
A Washington man writes to the Repub-
lican of that city complaining of the water
we drink. The editor Indignantly asks
who he means by 1--WE" and "what water?"
The oldest Journalist on the staff of the
Cleveland Plsindesler sums up his expe-
rienc5 as folio VS.: "No man can keep habit
ual company with a cockroach and be cheer
fuI"
When you die ask your friends to bury
you 10 one of the stylish, handsome and
easy basket collins just invented. They are
h. Inafe - r1rrr fnr mt rsNrf
Free Press.
The Rev. Joseph Williams. colored, of
Franklip, Tenn, was sued for rent by his
landlord; so he kissed a sister frequently. in
hopes of having his salary raised. He Is on
trial and will succeed.
The poet Close, who is in the habit OF
petitioning every new English AdmInistra
ton for pension and title, has soused b s
muse in the English Channel, and come out
| with an epic on Boyton.
Some curious names are developed by the
census takers. For instance, Paris Green,
an aged colored woman, puts in her claim
Tor recognition as destroyer OF potato bugs,
in the vicinity of Elmira.
One of the gratifying results of the --
is that Judge Nelson was able to so through
it ali, and yet make an addresses he did
last Sunday-before the Y. M. C.. A. OF Sar-
stoga, which is highly spoken of.
An editor having asked an Illinois farmer
for crop news, received this answer: Sand
INV the reaper reapeth, the mower mowetb,
and the little bumblebee getteth up the busy
granger's trowsers-leg and bumbleth."
An old maid from America was the cause
! OF the last Chinese rebellion. She gossiped,
and binted and put on knowing looks,
and finally got the celestisls TO hacking
| each other. And then she was as happy as a
| clam.
Two Connecticut farmers have just become
good friends after feud lasting twenty-one
years, aud we may trust now that the time
/ will come when Bob ToOmbs Will let ParsOn
Brownlow hold him on his lap.-Detroit
/ Free Press.
! joaquin Miller is said to be very ordi-
nary looking man. When he walks down
to the beach with the psrsgraphist of the
| Milwaukee, Sentinel, people can't tell which
| is the paragraphist and which is Joaquin.-
Courier-Journal.
The Rev. Adirondack Murray is having
church built in Boston that is to seat three
thousand people and cost $4,000. 1t is a
pity that so much brick and mortar should
be squandered on the sort of religion that
Brother Murray breaches.
Give boy market-basket OF groceries TO
carry home and he will swing it across his
spine, bend half way to the ground and
groan with agony, but give him that weight
of base ball bats and he will skip along as
merry as potato bug in ten acre lot.
O,weIlers at Long Branch yesterday were
for moment Mortified when they learned
that building had been struck by light
ming. But then it turned out to have been
ionlv church, and their uneasiness val
ished.-New York Commercial Advertiser.
A father, fearing an earthquake in the re-
gion of his home, sent his two boys to dis
tant friends until the peril should be oyeri
A few weeks after the father received this
letter from his friend: PLEASE take your
bows home, and send down the earth
quake"
An enterp.ising Detroit firm hired one OF
French,s elephants to parade the streets
blapketed with their advertisements. but
when they came to start him on he refused
to bulge and the most savage DroddtDg had
no visible effect upon him He cidns pro-
pose to become daily paper.
This fashion OF wearing striped stockings
is bound to make trouble. pretty woman
in Quincy, H.. was standing in front OF a
shop window, and seeing young man
peeping at her from a basement grating, she
coolly poked him In the eye with her para
sol, just to let him know Ee wasn't looking
at BARRIERS pole.
Miss Annie Oliver, a young woman CT
20. introduced as "the woman who has con-
quered 800 liquor dealers, closed their sa
looms, and won all of them to Christian
life" preached in a New York Methodist
church recently. The experience of the late
crusade was. that II took five days TO con-
vert each saloon keeper VINO really yleioed.
At this rate, Miss Annie Oliver has spent
1000 days, or eleven years all but fort
night, in the gracious work. Either she
must have commenced business at nine
years, or her age is pleasant feminine
fiction.