Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1875-11-26
FAcTs AND rANcIEs.

would be less wrecks.
Whisky is like an internal furnace
and an Internal turn-us.
Take care Of the poor Indian aud he'll
take hair Of us.
Men who are used to going It pretty
fast-the locomotive engineers.
Stanley says that African mosquitoes
are as big ass Kentucky chew Of tobacco,
"COurtship is bliss" said an ardent
young man. "Yes, and matrimony is
blister" snarled an old bachelor.
Why Is a fashionable lady on the street
like a neat chambermaid2 One is tidy
around above while the other is tied
around below.
An old lady in Detroit, hearing that
American Girl was dead, remarked: ave
allus said that this tightlacing would
lay 'em out some day"
Another brilliant wedding" The
young man with a flower on his coat is to
marry the young woman with Vie habit
of saying THE ide-yahl"
S~hoe-dealsr: IL fear we have no mum
Der elesens, miss, but here is a.large pair
Of mines" Customer: "NiAesl D'you
take me for a cinderella2"
And now we have the delightful
season to the young and ardent, when
the coal fires are started in the parlor,
and the old folks grow sleepy at an early
hour.
Oxford University has just issued the
Smallest Bible in the world" One as
small as a ~three-cent piece would be too
cumbersome for some men to carry
around.
A young importer down town remarks
that when he sees asweet creature dress.
ed in the prevailing fashion, her appear
ancs invariably reminds him of a draw
back on sugar"
While Spilkins was reading aloud to
his family about The Samoan Swindle,l'
Mrs. S. ~innocently interrupted him with
the inquiry who on the earth this Sam
Owen was, anyhow
Never insult a man because he is poor
IN purse or raiment; for beneath a rag.
ged coat it may be hat a muscle lies
concealed that could put a head on the
oldest man in the business.
The notice is displayed in the bedroom
Of a Kansas hotel: Gentlemen wishing
to commit suicide will please take the
center of the room, to avoid staining the
bed linen, walls and furniture with blood.
James Gordon BENEFITS new ball room
connected with his residence on Fifth
avenue will be inauguratsd next month
by a ball in honor of some distinguished
English gentlemen who will then be Mr..
Bennet's guests.
If you in lager6nd no bliss, and loathe
cigars-no child 10 kiss-no wife to
love-no gal to h%ug-don't seek oblivion
in the jug; and if you haven't any sister,
just ask some chap to lend you his, to
spark for a little while-then I" Splice
and all the rest will come in nice.
1t has become a great national ques-
ton whether the African peanut cen.
tains more brain food than the Virginia
nut. The shucks of the African look
more picturesque on the benches after
prayer-meeting, but home enterprise
should always be encouraged.
Two Of our "kullud' citizens, after
intently witnessing a game Of baseball,
were heard conversing as follows: 81
say, Sambo, less us jine de baseball
club" What for, ~niggsr2" well
Sambo, kase it larn you how ter. ketct
fowls on de iy-a mulch easier way than
stealth dem from de roost."
These are the days when the usually
careless and sportive turkey becomes
sober and meditatiye, and may be seer. or
the sunny side Of the barn with the
governors proclamation under one foot
and an almanac under the other, reckon,
ing up the number of days in the re
mainder Of his natural existence.
That Christianity is gaining grounC
there is no room to doubt. The othel
day two Vicksburgers, seated in tbs
shade Of an awning, got into a dispute
as TO whether the M~ethodists outnum
bered the Baptists in the South, and be
fore they we're separated the Baptist hat
chawed a good share Of the Methodist
left ear Of. There's nothing like stand
ing up for your church.