The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1875-12-23


decided that should adopt the ancient
and confessedly safe method, known to
the scientific world, as the "Qudruplez
VelOei." (5eo Encyc Americana, Vol.
XII, page SGT, Art, Motion l passed
the Rubicon" safely. About City yards
further on was the other bridge which
was short end low, and determined to
cross this Ike folks. The impetus l gave
myself on starting sent ne further in
that direction than l wanted to 90, and
in trying to che ok up, trOd upon a stone,
which Cling forwards, threw tie center
Of gravity somewhat behind me, and in
my efforts to regain IT, kept treadiDg
backward, and backward. till-sPlash,
and I found myself at the bottom Of the
race. l was only slightly wetted, and
erawled oct and started for the house.
| slept in back room, or shed" and
could enter it without going in the house
1 entered the room aud groped around
for the bed, which on finding, l pitched
right on to, but pitched too far, and but
ted my head against q knot on log
which raised bump on it that would
have astonished a phrenologist. l lay
there for awhile wondering what kind Of
eggs those negroes put in the whisky,
when felt an unpleasant sensation in
the region of the stomach which 1 attrib-
uted to the blow given my the old log.
Be that as it may, L got up and went
to shelter that was built over loom, at
one end of the b ouse. know not what
demon tempted me, but on reaching the
lo7m, bestrode the thread beam" and
soon began spirited process Of upheav-
al IN the ardor of this novel Occuna-
ton | leaned too far on one side, the
beam turned, and squelch-crack-squa
-squa went |, the treadles, and an old
hen, that with her brood, had taken
lodgings beneath for the night. Not
liking such sudden and rude Interrupt
ton of her dreams Of junebugs, grass
hoppers, etc, she flew at me Ike all
hate, and the first pass she made l lost
a handful of hair, the second, and she
stuck a spur (sbe wore spurs) right into
the knot on my head made by the knot
on the old house log, squaliing all the
time like she had no sense. Some folks
say "a spur in the head is worth two in the
heel, there amt word CT it so. This
bubbub out of doors awoke ma within,
AMI heard her say" something's after
the hickens,-Tommy get up and see
what it is" Now Tom was little fel-
low, and l knew that he would nt come
round there only at the tip end of q
switch. But, directly heard him call
ing the do5-'h ere, Beav., here, he re,
rhoit, phoit" | was not afraid of Bsav.,
either, but 1 didn't want to be freed
where was, so broke for high rock
that stood solitary and alone a short
distance off, and on turning short to the
left to get behind it-crash, jing-aIing-
ling went something, and l thought that
had surely upset and broken full
crate ofware. It proved to be my little
sisters playhouse" and had knocked
down their dishes. After this discovery
l sat down, but o, my 1. got up again
quick, and whatever it was that 1 sat
down on got up with me, singing like
forty hornets. l started IN a lope for the
mill, it started too, and kept up with me,
never letting go its hold, and singing
the calves of my legs every step. I
thought the blasted thing was leaking
yellow, jackets down on them as ran.
l reached fence and determined to see
what 1t was. had sat down on locust
limb chuck full of rhorns. The little
girls had brought it to their playhouse
so that they could get thorns to pin
leaves together to make ribbons etc.
Boys, beware of egg-nog, specially the
nog. Aud let US all deplore. the fact hat
whisky makes so many fools in the
world, and also let US deplore the fact
that there are so many fools in the world
that are so, without the aid of whisky.
JOSH.