Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1875-08-18
Mark Twain's Advice sn Domestie Dis
e1Pllne.

According to my observation, the
most difficult time to bring up child
| is in the morning. You can sometimes,
though seldom. bring them up In the
morning by yelling at them; but the
effectiveness of the process diminishes
with its repetition, even when not en-
tirely neutralized by the children's trick
of stopping their ears with the bed
clothes. The only prompt, effective,
and absolute method is to bring them
up by the hair. If your child has a good
healthy scalp. without any tendency to
premature badness, this method will
work with themost gratifying efficiency.
Try it about once a week, and you will
be surprised to observe how its intiu-
ence will extend through the six days.
inspiring your child with the liveliest
possible interest in the resplendent
pageantry of sunrise. The pulling up
of a darling child by the hair requires
the exercise of energy and tirmness I;
but not affectiOnate parents will hesitate
at the little sacrifice of this kind for
the welfare of his offspring.
Nothing can be more fatal to your
discipline than to allow your children
to contradict you. If you happen to be
BETRAYED into any misstatement or ex-
aggeratiOn in their presence, don't per-
NIT them to correct you. Right or
wrong. you must obstinately insist on
your own infalibility and promptly sur
press all opposition, with force if need
be. The moment you permit them to
doubt your unerring wisdom you will
begin to forfeit their respect and
pander to their cOnceit. There can be
no sadder spectacle than parent sur
rounded by olive branches who think
tina: they know more than he does.
vividly remember how my father-whO
was one of the most rigid and success
full of iplinarians-quelled the
aspiring egotism that prompted me to
correct his careless remark (when he
was reckoning a problem in shillings)
that five times twelve is siXty-two and
n half. 49," said he, looking over his
spectaeles and surveying me grimly,
''ye think ye know more'n yer father,
hey' Come ere to me " His invita-
tion was too pressing To decline, and
for a few eXcruciatiDg moments | re-
posed in bitter humiliation across his
left knee, with my neck in the embrace
of his left arm.
didn't see him demonstrate his
mathematical accuracy with the palm
of his right hand on the largest patch
Oh my trOwsers, but felt that the old
man was right; and when, after COM
pleteiy eradicating my faith In the null
tiplication table, he asked me how much
five times twelve was, | insisted with
tears in my eyes, that il was siXty-two
and a half. "That's right" said he.
''1'll learn ye to respect your father if
have to thrash ye twelve times day.
Now go'n water them bosses, N be
lively, too J" The old gentleman didn't
permit my respect for him to wane
much until the infiammatory rheuma-
tism disabled him, and even then he
continued TO inspire me with awe until
l was thoroughly convinced that his
disability was permanent.
UnquestiOning obedience is the
crOwning grace of childhood. When
you tell your child to do anything and
he stops 10 inquire why.it is advisable to
kindly but firmly fetch him a rap across
the ear and inform him That's why ~
He will soon get in the way of starting
with charming alacrity at tho word of
command.
One of the most inveterate and an
nOying traits of children is inquisitive-
ness. Ii you are incOnsiderate enough
to attempt to satisfy their OmnivorOus
curiosity, you may as well prepare to
abdicate, for you will be nonplussed by
their questions dozen times a day,
and your weak sagacity will he hope
lessly compromised. An average child
is magazine of unconquerable and
disconnected cOnundrums. You cannot
expect children to have much reverence
for a parent whose ignorance they can
expose twice out of three times trying.
1t Is well enough to answer an easy
question now and then. just to convince
them that you can when you choose /;
but W hen they come at you with a poser,
tell them: ''Oh, never mind !" or "Shut
up" and then they will grow indepen-
dent and self-reliant, and restrained
only by veneratiOn from splitting your
head open-tO find out how it holds so
much infOrmotion without letting more
out of it.
1t would be difficult-very difficult
to estimate the beneficial effect that
would be entailed upon their children
1T parents generally would adopt the
method here vaguely indicated.