Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1875-01-05

fast.
Ayoung lady asked q booksellers clerk
il he had Festus." mo" he answered,
but I'm afraid % boil is coming on the
back of my neck"
What doth it profit Il pastor if be gets
seven dressing gowns and fourteen pairs
of slippers, and has not the wherewith
to go to market?
Tom Hood, at q Lord Mayors dinner,
once leaned back at about the middle of
the feast and requested the waiter to
bring hin the rest in money.
Quin. having drawn a map of the
world, was asked why he marked the
Polar regions L. s." and he said, BE.
cause it is the place Of the SEAL"
An East Boston lady awoke from a
doze recently, and, mistaking a set Of
jewelry which she had in her hands for
apple parings, threw it into the stove.
Those ald.headed old doctors who
Rugged Katie King" when they thought
she was a spirit, are Mortified to find it
was a plump little widow of the earth,
earthly.
Ayoung lady in Bladensburg, tired of
going it alone" has married John
%Rightbower. 1t is altogether probable
she will order him UPON winter
mornings.
In addition to the ride which a nickel
secures a passenger on the Baltimore
street cars, he is entitled to a small guam.
tity Of the vitriol thrown by deceived
maidens at deceiving conductors.
Young America is very forward. "Tll
put 6 head en- you" said a little gamin
to a companion. you try it" was the
quick reply, land your mother monkey
will be a cherub in ten seconds"
The Brooklyn Argus tribute to the
Californian who has invented q paper
cravat: He only needs to pile the
fuel under the boilers of his genius, and
the world will be obliged to listen when
he let's off steam" Il.
When a Westchester woman detects
her husband walking crooked down
the road, she doesn't get mad about it,
but t%houghtfully observes to her CON-
psnion: Jane, | shouldn't wonder il
it was an earthquake that makes John
walk that way"
A rustic youngster, being asked out to
tea with a friend. was admonished to
praise the eatables. Presently the but.
ter was passed to him, when he remark.
ed; Very nice butter-what there is of
it" and observing a smile, he added,
and plenty of it--such as it is"
A young..lady.was overheard tell ing q
friend the other evening that "she was
dreadfully put out" because her pa haS,
rented a pew in the third row FROM tb.e
pulpit, and she couldn't see the fzshions
worth q cent without twisting her mech
OF almost. There's no pleasure in
going to church any more" shc says.
Girls should be warned Of the DANCE,
they run in marrying railroad brake,mer,
An enthusiastic member Of thatfrakernity
on being awakened the other night from
a dream Of an impending crash BY a
train, found himself sitting up in bed,
holding his wife by the ears, having
nearly twisted her head Off in his frantic
efforts to down brakes"
Said an Irishman to a telegraph ope.
rator: DO you ever charge anybody
for the address Of a messageY" mo"
replied the operator. and do you
charge for siguing his name, sir2' said
the customer. mo, SIR" well, then,
will you please send this2 / just want
my brother to know ! am here" handing
the following: ITO John McFlinn-at
New York-[signedl Patrick McFlinn.'
II was sent as a tribute to Patricks
shrewdness.
In his lecture room talk Mr.. Beecher,
with many tears, said: God is my
witness that | am sweet. hearted,
There 10 no one in the world towar,
whom | am not sweet at heart" Per
haps this is the reason why he does no
press that case Of his against Tilton
His heart is too sweet to permit tlim I.
punish the man who, if Mr.. Bescher i
falsely accused, is the foremost scouudre
OF the world. After Mr.. Beecher ha,
done speaking, q Mr.. Hill jumped u,
aud said II want to say a word for III,
women Of the church, who are too tint,
to speak themselves. While some mel
have seen ct to go away from this body
not n woman has left Plymouth
church" This Is interesting because /
is the first intimation We have had tina
anybody has withdrawn from Mr.. Beecl
er's flock because Of the scandal ahDu
the shepherd. But it seems to US tba
the statement bears a little hard upol
the women Of the congregation; Mr.
Hill would have been kinder 70 them |
be had not paid them this lefthandet
eomnliment