Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1875-02-04
Modern Weddings.

1t there is any one feature of our social
life which exhibits its folly, its mean
ness, its pride, its poverty, its pretension,
It's love of display, its uselessness, its ut
ter lnadequacY to meet human wants and
everyday circumstances, it is that of
| modern weddings. Walking along a city
street on almost any evening you will
come to a house lighted from cellar 10
attic. carpet spread from the threshold
to the sidewalk, and over that an awning
raised which forms covered way
| through which white satin slippers NAV
pass without danger of soiling or contact
with any rude substance.
! Inside, the reception-rooms are crowd
| ed; the bride is decked out in all the
| paraphernalia Of white satin, white lace,
white flowers, white gloves, white shoes,
| and white ribbons; and the bridegroom,
| looking very silly or very much bored,
| stands straight up beside her at the top
OF the drawing-room or parlor, on exhi-
! bition for the benefit of the crowd who
come and cape and stare for about fifteen
all of it. The guests, it is true. have
come and gone within two hours; they
have barely gone through the usual form
of congratulation to The bride and groom :;
perhaps they have eaten white grape, a
morsel of cake, and drank a glass of
wine, but to accomplish this there have
| been weeks of preparation and perhaps
not little sacrifice
The parties may be persons of no
fortune-usually they are not; the girl
may have been barely able to squeeze an
outfit out Of "dear papa" the young
man may be a clerk or salesman IN
store, or at the most just working into
| business on his own account.
But all the same the programme must
be gone through The fashionable we'd
ding toilet must be procured; the
supper must be furnished by a
restGurdteur; the outfit must be "stylish;"
mamma and the girls must have new
dresses to harmonic with the rest of the
doings, and papa must somehow or other
pay the bills. Nor does papa" con-
slider himself man to be pitled 1t is
quite as much his fault as that of his
Womenkind. He grumbles, it is true
the person who carries the pocket-boOk
always does-but in his secret heart he
wishes to do the thing bravely, and he
will strain point to make display at
which the neighbors will look, and which
will perhaps furnish paragraph for a
society paper, when he would not think
dren housekeeping or begin fund for
future emergencies.
Moreover, what girl can endure to be
behind her associates-those who were
married before her or those who are to
be married after her? All that her
father can spare, therefore, and all that
her mother can scrape, must be spent
| upon her trousSeau so that her setting
off may do them proper credit. What
| becomes of her afterWard is a question
of no Importance they will then be
done with her So with the anticipation
of living on the third floor of a semi-fash-
| ionable boarding house-for they will
not go to housekeeping until they can
receive in "style," and the denizens of
boarding houses are not expected to re-
| ceive at all-they start out with the ecl0t
proper to the occasion, and are rewarded
for months o. toll and anxiety, for ex-
pending enough to have made a nucleus
of future fortune or saved them all their
petty embarrassments, by the reflection
that they did everything in d style equal
to the richest of their friends and &C
quaintances.
The friends" perfectly aware of the
state of the case, are also quite as we'll
aware what is expected CT them. If they
go 10 such a wedding they must go in
elegant cOstume-carpets are not laid
upon sidewalks nor awnings spread for
black silks and gray cashmeres-and
they must not go empty handed; they
must carry or send in advance a marriage
gift.
And what must it be? Nothing small
and nothing useful, unless it is so costly
as to excuse its practical qualities. They
quite we'll know that council will be
held upon every article as it arrives, and
that every one of the dear five hundred
will be voted "mean," or the reverse,
according to the size and splendor of the
offering. So, as the taste is known per-
haps to be not Of the finest or &socia-
tions the most cultured, size and capaci-
ty for display are frequently and natu
rally preferred to intrinsic merit, and
the young couple have to dispose of
quantity of bulky ware much less valua-
bic III reality than it seems, and disgust
ingly unavailable when an effort is made |
as is not unfrequently the case-to dis |
pose of it for something that is needed. |
But the "show" part Of modern we'd |
ding is not it's worst part. There is no |
harm in white silk or white lace, com
Portable awnings or gorgeous suppers,
provided other and more necessary
things are not sacrificed to them. But |
in nine cases out of ten they are. Sub
stance, comfort, permanence, durability,
much that assists to render the first |
months and even years of married life
safe and happy, and which lays the
foundation of a secure prosperity for
all the years to come, are laid upon the
shrine of pitiful and inexcusable van
ity. For in ordinary cases there is moth
ing in the means, or the position. or the
attachments of the prospective son-ln-
law to furnish motive for thus parad-
ing his entrance into the family of his
ttancee. On the contrary, he is often OF