The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1875-04-10
NUMBER 81.
Laughing,Gas.

The father of all corns-&pop corn.
Alderman Beecherchuck helps to
govern Cairo.
Sure to produce short crops-the
BARRIERS shears.
New Bedford has but one whaler
left-a school master.
70 make a tall man short-try to
borrow five dollars Of him.
If you are out in = driving storm,
don't attempt to hold the rains. !,
Uncle-a How did the mother Of
Moses hide himf" Nieee-" With q
stick"
Detroit has poet worth 81 ,OONS
bgt it is superfiaous to say that be
isn'G good poet.
A puppy and an accordeon was the
marriage fee offered to Cedar Springs
clergyman, the other day.
There is 10 more scandalous place
than Turkey, and yet that govern
ment is without an American minister.
At the spelling school in Indian
apolis all the lawyers, editors, clergy
men and teachers went down on
"ipecacuanha."
1t is no harm to shoot a cat in Ver-
mont, but if You happen to miss the
cat and kill boy, the authorities
make an awful fuss over it.
g There! that explains where that
clothes line went tot" exclaimed an
Iowa woman as size found her hus-
band hanging in the stable.
A New Orleans paper says the dol
lar stores in that city are places where
you may buy twenty-five cent ar
ticle you don't want, for four times
its value.
!" 1t isn't lond praying which counts
with the Lord SO much as giving four
full quarts for every gallon" says an
Arkansas circuit rider.
In a case in n Detroit court last
week, hack drivers testimony was
impeached. As Washington said Of
Arnold's treason: Whom shall we
trust now ~
Gone fortunate thing in being a
king" says the Detroit Free Press,
!" is that kings never have to get up
nights and lug the potatoes in beside
the coal stove" ~
An italian nobleman has taken np
his residence in this city for while.
He turns the crank with the same
facility as the rest Of his brother ex-
ileS.-Aflnmfn Meme.
A Boston journal prints directions
how "a walk wit3ssafa1Ka1 a1oUn innlinsass
of plate glass showered profusely with
OIL" The best plan is to slide off and
take to the street. svz gp
A lady at Memphis says she doesn't
want any jewelry, hasn't looking
glass in the house, and wouldn't take
a silk dress as gift. Memphis has
another living curiosity cross eyed
cat.
A st. Louis sergeant Of police froze
to death few nights ago while max
ing his rounds. This is another awful
on the foolish custom of
closing saloons at IL o'clock.--M-
lraukee Ne,Cs.
An Ohio youth is to be hanged next
March for killing small boy to OBJ
tain possession Of a pound of brown
sugar. 1t was the principle Of the
thing, not the sugar, which Influenced
the jury.
"Julius, why didn't yon oblong
your stay at the Springs" "Kase,
Mr.. Snow, dey charge too much"
" How so, Julius :" "Why, de land
lord charged dis colored individual
wild stealing de spoons" ~
Josh Billings says: Above all
things, learn your child to he honest
and Industrious if these two things
don't enable him to make figure in
this world, he is only cypher. and
never was intended for figure.'
"We measured the riotous baby
against the cottage wall is the be-
ginning Of a poem in q Milwaukee.
paper. This is certainly an improve
ment on the old plan of sitting down,
on the refractory squaller.
"Will the boy who threw that pop.
per on the stove please come up hero
and get a present Of a nice book, said.
a Sunday school superintendent in.
Iowa; but the boy never moved. He
was far-seeing boy.
One of the girls at Vassar keeps up
her studies, keeps track of eight love,
stories in weekly papers. writes twice
a week to five yonng men, sews for 4
charitable society and finds time to.
ride and skate and practice for con-:
cert.
Those two Kentucky lady hotel
clerks in St. Louis are winning cons-.
mcndations daily. They possess no.
single characteristic Of the males Of
their profession save the one feature
Of parting their hair in the middle.
"'Twins, marm,' sez l, 1twins!'n
once wrote the lamented Artemns
Ward. So chronicle We similar case
Oh King street last Thursday, which