The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1875-12-25
BUDGET OF FUN.
The Man who sang.

OO0Ses VI wv
-
The Man Who Sang.
A man with an old white overcoat enveop-
ing his form entered saloon on Randolph
street and asked for drink, stating in the
same breath that he was hard up and couldn
pay unless the bar-keeper wanted song.
"Are you good singer asked the saloon
Keeper.
Zone of the best in the land" was the
modest reply. :,
whisky is very high now, and l should
good big drink" ~
"tiive me a gigantic drink and handiul
Of crackers and I'll sing right along ioF hve
hours" replied the old men.
II was then O'Clock in the afternoon, and
bargain was struck Disposing OF his liquor
at one grand gulp. the old man took seat,
pulled off his boots, spit on his hands, and
sang:
Once upon time had cat,
And his eyes were sOrter blue.
He fastened his eyes on the wall, kept tirae
with his foot, and sang the above three times
over and over without any let up for about
fifteen minutes. when the saloon-keeper asked
him If he would not just as soon change.
lie said he would, and started off:
Oh! don't you hear me nowe
And his eyes were sorter blue.
The tune was the same, and the old man
put all the voice he had into it. The salooL-
keeper never saw man before who tried so
hard to earn his money, but after half an
hour had passed the monot0ny of the blue
eyed dog became painful, and the old mans
employer said
II guess you needn't sing any more--pll
let you OIL"
"You are kind hearted man" replied old
white ovcrcOat, "but when l agree TO thing,
I'm there as firm as Plymouth rock. Some
men would sneak out of it alter getting pay,
but I'm going to put in four and half hours
more"
And he went on:
Oh! don't you hear me now?
Once upon time had a bureau,
And his eyes were sorter blue.
Several men came in and said ii was fun,
and, feeling encouraged by their smiles, the
Did man shouted out his words like Kansas
farmer driving oxen.
"There, that's plenty" said the saoonist,
when the old man had been singing for fifty
minutes.
81 made solemn agreement and III stick
10 nv word if don't earn another cent tins
winter!"
And he set of again with
Oh! don't you hear me now?
Once upon a time had bedstead,
And hiZ eyes were sorter blue.
"Come, now, you get out of this. exclaim-
ed the saloonist, finding bad crowd coming
in.
81 was hired to singg my pay for l,and now
III be hanged if cheat you one cents WORTH"
replied the old man; and he raised his voice
key higher and sang:
Oh! don't you hear me now?
Once upon time had moving machine,
And his eyes were sOrter blue.
'tiet out O. here" yelled the indignant sa
loon.keeper.
-Four hours more" replied the stranger,
and
Oh! don't you hear me now?
Once upon time had a clothes line.
And his eyes were sorter blue.
The saloonlst took him by the collar and
walked him out doors, and showed him Off
the walk, but the old man put more power
into his voice, leaned against hltching post,
and sang:
Oh! don't you hear me now!
Once upon time had mosquito bar,
And his eyes were sorter blue.
Pretty soon a policeman came along and
ordered him to quit singing and move on,
but the old man replied:
1--WE been hired for five hours, and I'll sing il |
out or drop dead"'
''Come along" sad the officer as he col, |
Jared him.
~ always bow to the law, and
Oh! don't you hear me now?
Once upon time had wind mill,
And his eyes were sOrter blue.
He was taken TO the police station and
locked up, and despite all remonstrances and
threats he continued to sing until the five
hours were up, saying to his captain, when
he had finished
"And now, being It's late, I'll sing the rest
Of the evening away at a big discount from
regular rates"-N. Quad.