Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1875-12-17
THAT BABY.
BY Fl. r. R.
{ Frem the Sunny South ]

.-r GFrem the Sunny South
There never was such baby; everv-
| body said so, and We all know that
what everybody says must be true.
| The loveiiest, the dsrlinTest, the
sweetest, the beantifulest. Ga, there
never was such 2 babyr
He's got my foot says grandma
| No. l.
And my hand quoth grandma No. Q.
His eyes are exactly like mine,' said
Aunt Ellen.
And his nose like mine, said the
other auutie. '.
He's q Thompson all over quoth
one grandma.
He's Wilson up and down. auoth
! the 9th T.
His toes are Ike mine, I think,
said mamma. anxious to claim some
part of baby
In short, that baby is discovered t.
resemble every member of the family
on both sides of the house, much tl
the disgust of its fond father, who
! hoped fer the sake of its beauty that
it would sese mble himself.
| Indeed. to b hold e. OF much con-
gratulsted ana wholly uncomfortable
Individual holding the baby is scene
| t'I chcIt u al hIGtSH
OF course, papa must hold him
| first say< the nursA. aud be sits with
! arms out~tretcl,efi and limbs Eremb D.
ing, holding that baby much after the
manner Of one who n0l ia hot potato.
He has sat TINS fer full fifteen min
utes-it seems like ages-without 50
| much as moving muscle. Or lifting
an eyelid, so fearful is he of crushing
the soft, jelly-llke little morssi, bun
died up III muslin and flannel.
Let me have him now bags Aunt
Ellen. eagerly extending her arms,
aud PAL yields him To her with a
sign of relief, saying in a confidential
tone :
He feels iik- hot poultice.
"A not pDulcice ! screams grand
ma No. l Indignantly, while the 4urse
retises TO conceal her laughter.
L never heard anything like it, ;
pipes grandma No. 2.
'On. Edward, [ wouldat have be-
heved It,, comes in smothered voice
from under the bedciOthes.
[ knew, how it would be all along
snuffs grandma No. 1, who has the
gilt of foresight III remai kable de-
gree.
Yes, I told Sarah year ago he'd
never care anything for that chI.d.
chimes III grandma No ,, who wound
have made AL excellent ciairvoyant
i.
He never did have the feelings of
father, adds grandma No. l which is
undeniabiy a remarkable speech, con-
siderlng that this sou and heir is the
berated .ther's first born.
Il wouldn't mind it, Ed ard, laughs
Aunt Ellen, aS the crestfailen papa,
who all this tune has stood with his
hin, suddenly flies from the sc.ne of
discomfortura, whiie tnas angel baby
unfeelluSiy sleeps, csretess of the pam
ne has been the means of lnti .otlng
upbn his paternal relative.
Yes; he sleeps al the time He
never cries H is just the best baby
IN the world He's a perfect little
angel Was there ever such baDy?'
'Ra's graudInas darling sugar loaf
'Papa's little man. 'Marla's tweerpy
meetny darliug; So heis.' He's auntie's
Innocent, lovely angel
Whether so much praise had a de-
moralizsg eff CT upon the ange. or
aiDG. we y. Dtlb ttiu IL ~
that. before a great while that baby
began To show Its trua character. He
wo2.d wake up at tlie inos5 uDseasona-
bie and unreasonable hcnrs; he would
cry when there wasn't the slightest oc
caslOu for If; tie would Z. nder you lia-
ble 10 unjust suspicious by suddenly
shrIek,ng as if vou had stuck pin IN
him, when you We're doing your best
endeavOr' t. soothe hin, to sleep. He
would insist upon beng trotted until
your limb were nearI7 dIsioca ted,
and your head ready to split; and the
moment you stop TO rest your weary
ankles, he compe led you to renew the
a,nusemaus by giving a reg u!ar war
whnop. He seems to have NJ pleasure
ex eept IN the misery and suifaring of
others. II Is f:til of deceit, hypocrisy
and fraud, he Is opposed to tne temper
ance reform, aud when We try to In-
stii temperance principles into MS teu-
der III nd, he goes off iuto horrible tits
# co!Lc, maliciOusly grows dark In the
face, and threatens 90 have Bis ,'k
spasm, until grandma, utterly deceived
Nv iIgs machiuations, declares that he
shall have = little tolidy to Ease 5itat
dreadful pam, SO he shall, whereupon
he INSTANTLY reviveS, aud Is trans
formed iato eu ahgei agaiu
Furthermore, if offered pareguric when
he has set his heart on toddy, he spits
it in our faces without the smallest
compuuction of Conscience. He de-
tights in taking aususpect1ug people
ont of their beds on freezing cold
nights. when the fire has All gone cut,
atri the thermometer IS down to zero,
| snd compelling them TO race up AID
down the flor w.th him until half
! trcz-G tt .;ea*'r, wiieu tir proves that
| ne is possessed Of = demon GY amiiiL x
ly going off to sieep, as If nothing had
| hapneueG As he gov older, II taxes
he entire household to amn-e him,
and he tyrapnizes over very one from
grandpi down; his piuythIu0 must be
the veiy thing we most vttine, and il
refu>,ed anysIlng, be yells aud storms
| 4rorna un'i' evIIyDoty y IS reduced tc
she most ahl c. Il omission.
>WuHt il ,Ieatsori y t.ie ma i@r :? ex
elsiin~ papa, startled f-nu H. s,fternooI
siesta bY one OF htby's yells.
.Nny, Edward he wants me to givf
bin ny p'arl necklace to play with.
| expOstulates mama
'Glve h,m the devil, calculated pap;
savnge'y.
FO,ta1ate'y, n doesn't want him
Edward, answered mama in a cOngrat
uiatorv tone, as she surrenders th
covetr d neckiac-.
Dat 81, mIs-ns.' chnckies blacl
nanny; 'ef he DID, ynu done hab t.
bring up ole Mex out of his hold Ions
fore dis
And that baby, having carried hi
poin.. i4ugns and crrws iik" an angel
There never Was suCn baby, eh
On, no, there never VS.,
THE New York ,Slt,I publishes a |
ter from Chicago, Ia which the state
ment is made that dunGg the cam
paign of 1872 Senator Morton drew o.
the st. Louis wnlskey ring for fit
Thousand dollars for use in the lid;
ana campaign, and mentions the edito