The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1875-06-19

are his, his to control, his to tondle, his
to care for.
The attentions that are claimed are
paid more and more irksomely; and the
lrksomeness augments the alienation.
Where all this will end, none can say;
perhaps in evenings spent in clubs, bar.
rooms and theaters, with all the natural
sequels.
II it is the mother Of the son who is the
mother-in.law, the essentials are the same,
the accidents alone being changed. She
feels that he is her son; she will not give
him up to any one else; she is jealous Of
any one who takes the first place in his
thoughts. Not impossibly she has been
ambitious, and has felt that no one was
good enough for him, So she Is naturally
disposed to find fault. From the heights
OF her experience she criticizes the young
wife, the novice in housekeeping, the in:
experienced mother. II ever grain Of
dissatisfaction arises in the bosom Of the
Young husband, the mother allows him TO
come to her with his complaints, She
gives him her sympathy she tries to
make herself necessary TO him. she JlHcieI
that in all this she Is doing him kind
ness.
When We consider what human nature
is, and what are the liabilities in the case,
it is scarcely TO be wondered at that the
mother-in.law Is an object Of dread.
But is all this needful? Must the
mother-in.law DO a mother.in.law9
In the first place, 1t is well enough to
bear in mind that no home is large
enough for two families. 1t makes no
odds hon many the members may be, but
they must be one family. And no family
can have more than one head. II the
mOther.in.law is to be head, why let that
DO understood beforehand, and let all
hands calculate accordingly. But II the
husband and wife are to be tho head why,
lot them BIO the head. This implies no
disrespeCt to the mother'iR. law, Every
man and woman must DO head In their own
home.
And then again, the mother.in.lay
must recognize the facts that in the case;
she must realize tho event, Her daugh-
ter Is married. This involves u great
deal. The daughter has new interests,
new duties. There is one, not the mother,
who now has tho first claim upon her,
She has not ceased to love the old friends;
she loves them none the less; but she
loves, she must love, the new, II not moro
intensely, yet with peculiar love such
US she feels for no other; else how could
she leave the old home for new? There
Is divine rs we'll as human wisdom
in the words. "a man shall leave father
and mother and Cleave to his wife" And
so OF her, She leaves her father and
mother and cleayGs to her husband.
The mother must resign the daughter
to the new ties, the new relation, All tho
future happiness Of the young people de.
pond on his, that thcy understand each
other, sympathize with each other. The
wise mother, she who Is far sighted in her
kindness, takes herself lin sense and for
u time) out Of tho way; she leaves them
to minister TO each other. She says to |
herself, "Perhaps | could do this better;
but they must learn to minister to each |
other, for the sake, not OF the present, but |
Of the future" II the thought comes to |
her, ale must increase, but must dc.
crease in the affections Of my child" II
brings with 1t nothing OF bitterness. She
sees In 1t but the inevitable; she sees in
her daughter only herself twenty-five
years agO,
And II IL well to realize that where
least Ia claimed usually most Is given,
and given most ungrudginglyD
II the mother.ln.law only understands
it, she need no longer be the dreaded
closet skeleton Of novels and young
couples. She may DO loved and trusted;
whose presence Is a benediCtion, whose
influence Is bond, not wedge; to be
loved IN life, mourned in deuil-not
mother.in.law, but mother In love.