Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1875-08-27
MULTUM IN PARV0.

AN ingram car-pet-A polite conductor
SWEETS in adversity-A sugar-house
failure.
THE dentists epitah-" He is filing his
last cavity"
If young ladies don't want to get stout
let them linger over their meals. Haste
makes waste.
a DEAF-MUTE named Acheson, now in
Newport Or. ~ Jail, has four brothers, a
wife and four sons who are also deaf and
dumb.
THERE will be an annular eclipse of the
sun on Sept 80, which will be visible in
this country At all places east of the
Mississippi the sun will be eclipsed.
WHEN man sees cat moving unsus-
pectingly along, within easy range, he
will involuntarily look around for stone
however good and noble he May be.
BIOLOGISTS have, discovered that the
ground of Southern Indiana Kentucky
and Tennessee is slowly rising, at the rate
of about foot every twenty-four years.
To PREVENT her lover from "going
back" on his promise, a Detroit girl al
ways introduces him to her friends as
tmy intended husband" So says the
Free Press. a# @1a
SECRETARY BRIsTow has refused to re-
nit the fine imposed upon a New York
excursion steamer for carrying several
hundred more passen gers than she was al
lowed to do by law.
"BURNINe incense, Mr.. Brown ?" said
Mrs. sFarringtosh, as she passed Brown in
the act of lighting his post-prandial cigar.
/" No ma am, y said the practical Brown,
" | am burning twenty cents"
THE only barber in the world who
would cut mans hair without asking
him if he wouldn't like little tonic on
it'' has just died of his own modesty,
covered with the contempt of his fellow
tradesmen.
A CLOUD Of grasshoppers struck at Els
sex, Mass, the other day, on the beach,
when the tide was high. and the cells came
up by thousands, without waiting for invi-
tation, and gobbled up the aforesaid hop.
pers. AE4
THERE is a Jersey farmer who ought to
get rich Whenever he sees neighbOr,'s
boy squirming down the road with his
hands clasped across his stomach, he al
ways goes out into his Watermelon patch
and counts the melons.
THERE IS not a broom factory in the
South Yet, if a market was created fol
broom-corn, farmers could realize 800 pei
acre by its production, and the capital in
vested in the manufacture would pay DC
per cent Vicks61rg Herald.
A MASSACHUSETTS man, wanting power
for his mill, which is on the river side
has hired an idle steamboat, backed it up
in proper position, and, taking off the
paddle-wheels, bolted the steamer fast, and
it furnishes all the power he wants.
MRS Cotton, who was married in Bar.
NUNS balloon, denies the report that she
| and her husband lived unhappily and had
separated. Mrs. Cotton says that they are
| devotedly attached to each other, and that
their baby, called the balloon boy, is a
great pet.
PROF. DAVID SWING has an article
in late Adoance apologizing for the
| fashions" He declares that one of the
dearest laws to the heart is thelaw OF
I Something Else Yesterday is a with
cred rose; new buds must be found for to.
| morrow
IT was confidently expected that rare
| minerals would be found in the Hoosac
tunnel, and possibly some new ones were
| discovered, but in this the lovers of min
eralogy have been disappointed The
main rock consists almost wholly of mica
| schist, talcose schist and slate.
THERE is one refreshing fashion this
| summer Women never wore their hair
| more beeomingly dressed since the days
| when Phidias and Praxiteles executed
| those incompatible embodiments of Gre
| clan women that have been the delight OF
all lovers OF true art ever since, and will
| continue to be as long as the world en-
| dures.-ProUideRce Journal.