The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1875-02-11
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

WHAT was never seen-the impres
sion OF kiss made by a typo on his girls
lips.
A GAUDY Chicago Justice of the Peace
is described as "a red, round lump OF
flesh, with two cracks for eyes"
III is said that an American leads one
OF the bands of brigands near Rome
What American is missing now?
The Maine Legislature, in accordance
with its annual custom, is considering a
bill abolishIng the death penalty.
| CINCINNATI is going to have another
suspension bridge across the Ohio River,
and has advertised for proposals.
A KENTUCKY goose has yieldec. Ieath.
ers enough for seven large pillows since
last spring. She deserves the chrome.
ENGLAND has only one divorce to
Americas ten. Over there they are
willing TO put up with fat-irons AMI
| such.
A Troy On. W firm was recently
| forced TO suspend through the dishon-
esty of travelling agent who embezzled
5000.
AN unknown disease is destroying the
cattle IN Missouri. 1t is supposed to be
caused by undigested chinch bugs eaten
| last summer.
THIS jute the ladies patch their back
hair with never looks more like real hair
than when it appears in the butter
| Berkshire Courier.
OILDoM is now a melancholy picture.
| "Olls well" is not the watchword any
more. All 1itusville is under the ham,
mer-from superabundance of OIL
A NEVADA man who had seven homely
al a 1 q or rnt l. Al,
had seven kegs filed with gold in his
cellar and every girl was married in five
months.
COMMON sense is an element in which
manr narsons are sadly wanting. Com
correct reason, mental capacity ana goou
understanding.
A UTICA editor, whose ear is shedding
its skin, explains that he has not been
anywhere to freeze it, but he has been
exposed to good deal of domestic dis
Cipline. .-Ronae Sentinel.
THERE is something grand and terrible
in the look of mother as she hauls the
potato basket out of the pantry, makes
hurried inspection, and calls out: "Ce-
lestia Janei every tater in this basket
has been frizr-DetrOt Free Press.
A YOUNG lady of Michigan avenue dis
long on the steps 10 say good-by one
night that she took cold. Love that
might outlive a fever will often succumb
to a cold in the head.-ChicdgO Inter
Ocean.
THE Toronto Mall talks editorially
| about 1874" through thirteen mortal col
umns without stopping to take breath.
| The mind recoils before the thought of
what would happen if the Toronto Fe-
male were to once get fairly warmed up
on such theme.
ITwas in Galesville. The little fellow
had heard of Charlie Ross, and didn't
mean to have any such fuss in his case.
| When a suspicious-looking man asked
him to ride he accepted, but when he
had gone, as he thought, far enough, he
managed to drop his hat. Not wishing
to leave so marked an object to aid pos
sible pursuers, the man alighted to pick
it up, and then the little five -year-old
strategist grasped the reins and took
bee-line for home, where the horse and
| buggy still remain waiting, as are also
couple of policemen, for the owner to
call.-B0st0n Transcript.
THE following hints for the use of
| safes, and of what should be put in
them, are vouched for by good authority:
Avoid fancy, colored inks, as they are
more liable to be obliterated by heat
when the safe is under fire. The black
inks are better. Lead-pencils will stand
the heat better than either, even when
the paper is burned black. Do not put
the most valuable account-books at the
sides of the safe, as the heat coming
from the outside will affect them first
Crowd the books from the sides to the
center of the safe for the purpose of
making them tight together, as in this
condition they will stand the heat much
| longer. Wood drawers are preferable to
iron for cash boxes and for small valu
able papers, as wood is "a non conductor
of heat and iron good conductor. Never
use in a safe a leather wallet as a recep-
tacle for valuable papers, as boiling
water, heat 212 degrees, will crisp and
curl it, convert it into gluey substance
and destroy the papers. When safe
has been under fire send for an expert to
open it.
THIS story of package of POSTAL cards
may seem to read like a romance, but
the Springfield (Mass.) Union asserts that
it is literally true: Mr.. Springfield is the
Postmaster at Tyner, Tenn, and Mr..
Tyner is the agent of the Postolficc De-
parlment at the postalcard factory in
Springfield, Mass Mr.. Springfield of
Tyner, needing some postal-cards, or
dercd them from the Postotiice Depart
ment. The order from Mr.. Springfield of
Tyner was forwarded to Mr.. Tyner of
Springfield, and Mr.. Tyncr of Springfield
4 a. A. cr-ir ufipid of Ty-
ner, but, Mr.. Springfield of Tyner not get
ting the cards from Mr.. Tyner of Spring
field, Mr.. Springfield of Tyner wrote to
Mr.. Iyner of Springfield making in
quiry regarding the cards ordered to be
sent by Mr.. Tyner of Springfield to Mr..
Springfield of Tyner, and this letter of
Mr.. Springfield of Tyner to Mr.. Tyner
of Springfield, inquiring about the cards
ordered to be sent to Mr.. Springfield of
Tyner by Mr.. Tyner of Springfield, Mr..
Tyner of Springfield now keeps to show
to his friends, when telling the story of
the postal ordered by Mr.. Spring
field of Tyner and sent to Mr.. Spring
field of Tyner by Mr.. Tyner of Spring
field, and finally received by Mr.. Spring
field of Tyner.