The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1875-12-22
SCATTERING NOTES.

Seeing is not believing. There are
many men you can see and vet cannot
believe. '""''
Columbus discovered Amer;c, Init
when boy he had as much difficulty in
seeing IN empty wood box or Waterfront
as any other boy.
The. Dominican Fathers have formed
an anti-profanity society in tho Eoetorn
District. 1t is recommended to d;san.
pointed politicians.
Big ears are now said to denote intel
lect. We make this statement solely he.
cause We do not desire to see Milwaukee,
become deserted city.
A noble Omaha mastiff has saved t,,e
lives of three children within a month
past, and bitten fourteen men who called
to- sell patent clothes.bar.
An unusual number of people are mar
rying now. Next year is leap-ycar, and
no woman wants it presumed that she
popped the question herself.
The Indians continue to alternate in
the far West, between minor massacres
and pipe.smoking conventions. Their
pipes OF peace are mere shams.
Mrs. Darlington wants. to know whv
the captain Of q vessel can't keep mem
orandum of the weight of his ancher, in
stead Of weighing it every time it leaves
port.
"a wife will hardly ever notice
whether her husband has his hair cut or
not. but let him 60 home with strange
hairpin sticking in his overcoat and
she'll see it before he reaches the gate.'
A girl in Berks county PENNSYLVANIA.
only twelve years old. rises daily at four
A. NJ, milks thirteen cows, and prepares
a breakfast for the family. Her hair
isn't ''banged.' and she dosen't wear a.
one-legged dress.
"Was the crowd tumultuous o. inquir-
ed one man Of another who had lust
come from the mass.meetine. sToo mul.
tuous'' replied the other. ..Oh, no. lust
about multuous enough to comfortably
fill the hail.
The woman suffrage of New Haven are
wrestling with the question. "Who is
the superfluous woman!' Of course We
can't tell, but we know a number Of FAM
lily men in town, each of whom thinks he
has married her.
''Now,'' said a citizen of Rawlins
Wyoming Territory, at recent dance,
"you see that heifer in a rcd dress; that's
my wife; an eff you dance with her
more n two times, pard, I'll shute the
hull top Nv yer he'd off. What'n yer
drink q
Moncure Conway lectured on Sunday
to the Chicagoans on ''The Devil" and
so graphically did he depict the party
with which Chicago is so familiar, that
reiterated applause testified the prompt
recognition by the AUDIENCE of their old
friend.
The bones of thousand departed China
men will be started from San Francisco
for China in few days. America, in the
view of John, is no country to be buried
in; and since the Guibord sensation we
are inclined to think John is somewhat
right.
Of the twenty-six members who have
held the Speakership Of Congress, only
six are now living namely: Hunter,
Winthrop, Banks, Grow, Colfax and
Blaine, Hunter is State Treasurer Of
Virginia, Banks, and Blaine are in Con.
gress, and the rest are in private life.
A meteoric stone weighing ninety
pounds fell in Missouri last week striking
darkey square on the head. He seemed
to be considerably confused when he got
up, and went off muttering: EFF know
ed for shuah, de man who frowed dat
brick, den I'd see whar am the Cibble
Rights of niggahs.
Pr0ctor's lectures on astronomy arc
revolutionizing the regulations of many
a Boston household. Parents, in their
ardor for science, no longer expect the
lights to be out and everybody abed by ten
O'Clock. A young man can call and ex-
lady now if it takes him till one clock
in the morning to do it.
'Now,' said the Professor, as he grew
animated in the discussion, s'all matter
constantly changes. I have changed
since taking my seat here. Every single
moment in my body are tens of thousands
of blood corpuscles smashed TO pieces and
forever destroyed. Senior on the back
seat lin voice expressive of deep
wonder -"Gosh!
| Perplexed Schneider, who had made a
garment for youth, and found himself
unable to dispose of the surplus fullness
which appeared when trying it on the
young candidate, declared vociferously ::
''De coat is goot! Is no fault of de coat.
De boy is too tim
A middle.aged compositor at the Gaz-
cite Office, Trenton N. j., named Peter P.
Packer, also served an apprenticeship at
the printing business at Princeton, and
the following is an ALTERATION composed
by himself: Peter Preston Packer,
practica! printer, previously pig-pen
painter poor, proud, particular person ;
present publisher (part proprietary
Princeton Penny Post.