The star. (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1874-1875, 1875-01-11
GOSSIP.
Take her up tenderiy,
SO young and sofair,
Only an organist
And n slllliact, of nravQr

A peep behind the curtain-"Mother,
don't get me mad nowi Harry is coming
and ] shall be all Of tiush."
A little girl, upon her return from
children's party, being asked ii she had
good time, replied, "Yes, but there
wasn't much boys there's"
Some people are never content. After
having all their heads mash edand their
brains knocked out, they will actually 20
to law to get further damages.
Why are sheep the least moral Of apl-
malsp Because they gdns6Ot in their
youth, spend much Of their time ON the
turf, many OF them are b1ackJegs, and they
iii get feeced al last.
Ihe young married women of st. Louis
are buying secondhand keys to make up
into bunches to wear ut their waists, al
ter The manner Of the German house,
wives, as painted by Carl Schurz.
A Frenchman is about opening an shy
meneai academy" in Covington, at which
young ladies' VIII be taught marriage
service, with all the proper sobs, signs
and mysteries In three easy lessons.
A colored preacher in South Carolina
puts his loot on excessive bribery at
eigctiohs and crushes it. ''Dis ting" he
says, lob gittin' 300 Tor vote is all
wrong; $lUis as much as it's worl"
DEER SUR-pleze -cend by The Barer 1
(Won) paxig of Skr0ughs, mejoum size,
al Sow scheep Skr0ugh dryver, AMI
obieege, ctc.-tOrder of rural Indian
ian.
A man who has been travelling in the
star West says that " hen an Idaho girl
is kissed, sne Indignantly exclaiins:
SNOW put that right back where you took
it iromP'
Nurse to Doctor--"When the paw little
ducky is on his rampages nignt, i finds
the least drDp O. sClmilant done i'm a
power y good. What is your tumble
opinion, Sir"
Our little nephews, nieces, cousins and
grandchildren have returned to their re-
spectIye Institutes OIL learning in and out
OF town. Quiet reigns III the house, and
the lock OH Lue pantry has been repaired.
A local on u certain newspaper accept
ed as d gilt u gallon OF non-exploslve ke-
rosene from a traveling agent. A local
Of III opposition paper courteously con-
senled 70 act as pail-bearer at his tu-
neral.
"B.ddy," said lady, ''step over and
see now old mrs. Jones is this morn
ing" In a few minutes Biddy returned
with the iniOrmat.on that Mrs. Jones
was seventy-tWU years, seven months
and two days old that morning.
A Georgia paper knows u man who
went all The wa! from Cassviile to At
lanta. On his return he looked solemn
with the weight Of garnered wisdom,
and said: Ill the world is as big ut
vother way as it Is that, it's a whopperw
A Missourian who attended prayer
meeting wltn A.s daughter lett compelled
70 rise up and remark: Il want te be
good anu go TO Heaven, but ii Lnese iei-
iers don't stop winklns at Mary there
will be good deal oi prapclng around
here the lust thing they knowp
II there Is one Lning in course Of do
meslic bliss that VIII bring to the vivid
imagination OF u fond papa visions OF his
bacnelor's life, 1T is " De punched under
the tnIrd rib about 2 O'Clock A. A., and
told in a melodlous whisper that "tootsy
woOtsy must be walked about a lily bit.o
Chicago has at last hit upon ground
of divorce concerning the justice OF wnIcn
all lair-minded people must agree. A
suffering VIE appeals tor severance q
naene1 ct thOyO for the reason that her bru-
Ia. nus sDand habitualiy eats raw onions
Tor supper. "ln onion there is strength"
but
Ibid Adam and Eve ever spank Cain
and Abel~ asks Elizabeth Smith. II Miss
Anthony or General COOmDs were 10 be
consulted Oh this important question, it
" oulu doubtless be found that Cain was
bulk Of whatever spanking " as admins
Tered.
He went to a lair, took supper, received
assiduOus attention from the ladies',
bought no end to dolls night caps, baby
jackets and chances in prlze chairs, and
paid FOR every thing with ii 40 bill, which
alasl when The distinguished stranger
had disappeared, proved to be coun-
Jerfeit.
A gentleman, while walking in his
garden, caught his gardener asieep un-
der y Tree. he scOlded HIM sOundly for
his lazlness, and ended by telling him
such a sluggarI was not worthy 10 enjoy
the light vi the sun. ut was for That
.'that 1 crept into the shade."
A stranger VINO was eating a piece of
pie in a restaurant, Saturday, struck his
his teeth against something hard, and
presently held up a two cent piece aud
eXclaiMed: Here, you-here's Two cents
winch found in this pieW 'Well, Pm
sorry il isn'L tifteen," replied the waiter,
"but the fact is, the times are SO hard we
can't do any better just now."
10! your nose is as cold as ice," a
Hamilton tather thought he heard his
daughter eXclaim the olher evening, as
he was reading in the next room. He
dlhCu III lOt OApldu6tlOu, UuU Uut
yorfng fellow was at one end OF the sofa
ana the girl AT the other, while both
looked so innocent and unconscious
that the old gentleman concluded that his
ears had deceived him, and SO retired
from the scene without word.
A ''rich" family in the West End tries
10 put on lots OF style ON small sums, and
yesterday neighbor woman called In
upon the lady OF the house, and through
an open door saw the youngest hopeful
OF the family snugly ensconced under
the bed clothes. Sne asked why he was
lying in bed at that time OF the day. .Oh
he likes to sleep in the morning." "That
aint so, MOTHER" yelled the little
wretch, 'you know you're washing my
breeches. Can't learn you to tell the
truth, old galr'
Some time ago preacher was accom-
panied by another preacher and lay
man to aneighborlng village, where spe-
cial evening services were held, aiier
which the Trio accepted an invitation 10
partake OF refreshments. The pastor
paid particular attention to the picked
beets upon the table, OF which he ex-
pressed himself as being very fond, and
being rallied by one OF his companions by
the remark, "You seem to I've iond OF
beets," he quickly retorted, "Yes, l am,
and that's why brought two with me-"