Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1875-10-29
SENSE AND NONSENSE.

drawback on sugar" That's nothing.
There has been a fearful pull-back on
'lasses all summer Chicago Iater-Ocedn.
THE Paris Figaro remarks that all that
is necessary now to enable an expert to
swim from Liverpool to New York Is a
boat alongside and some one to feed the
swimmer.
How MANY people with their hands in
their pockets and q vacuum in their stom.
achs are going about saying: "Oh, If my
vain mother had only letme learn trade"
N. y. Graphic.
"DID you ever go to a military ball ?"
asked lisping maid of an old veteran.
No, my DEAR growled the old soldier;
Z" in those days once had military ball
come to me, and what do you think ?-it
tosk my leg offF'
To ASCERTAIN If your gun is loaded,
put your foot on the hammer and blow in
the muZzle, letting the hammer slip from
under the foot and descend with smart
force on the nipple. If the gun is loaded,
you will be notified of the fact
81 SELLS peppermints on Sunday" re-
marked good old lady who kept candy
shop, "because they carries em to church
and eats 'em, and keeps awake to hear the
sermon; but if you want comfts you must
come weekdays. They're secular COM
modities."
THE numerous reports as to the occur
renee of a remarkable marine animal on
the coast of New England during the past
summer have induced the Boston Society
of Natural History to prepare and dis
tribute a circular calling for information
on the subject.
A THIRTEEN-YEAR-o OLD son of q Wind
sOr (England) inn-keeper named Beasley
recently committed suicide, in a singular
fashion, on his father telling him to clean
his boots for him. He tied a cord to the
handle of door, threw it over the door
and hanged himself.
A MARRIED philosopher, whose views
respecting nursery management fashions,
domestic economy and minor morals have
long experienced steady opposition, de-
scribes the reflective and analytical intel
lect as "that divine faculty of reason
which distinguishes man from woman"
1T is now law in Egypt that every
soldier that enters the army must learn to
read and write in Arabic. The officers are
required to learn some foreign language,
either English or French. If the soldiers
do not know how to read and write when
they enter the service, they are taught by
their officers.
THERE is Il deal of truth and good sense
in this clipping: "Children are children
as kittens are kittens A sober, sensible
old cat that sits purring before the fire
does not trouble herself because her kitten
is hurrying and dashing here and there in
fever of excitement to catch its own
tail. She sits still and purs on. People
should do the same with children. One
of the difficulties of home education is the
impOssibility of making parents keep still
it is with them, out of affection, all watch
and worry"
THE other day one of the Detroit Union
School girls called to companion: "Say,
Nellie, did you know that Kitty Harper's
pa has bought house?" mo; is that
so? Is it a nice house9" Great big
brick house, with the awfullest biggest
panes of glass you ever sawp' "And bay
windows?" mo; just straight win
S sne taMSdd haa aMay settles haaHed hsad TWO Na
bay windows on our house, and though
Kitty is niee,gi she can'tbelong to our
set."-Det10Sf Free Press.
RECENTLY, In New York city, it was
discovered that one wall of tivestory
brick building encroached upon neigh
boring lot. A slit of eighteen inches
wide was taken from the gable ends from
the roof to the foundation, and, creased
timbers having been placed under that
part thus left standing alone, the whole
1900 square feet of wall was pushed
along the timbers to its proper place by
means of jack-screws without disturbing
its plumbness or displacing the plastering.
The workmen in the building pursued
their avocation as usual.
JUST after the trial of a petty case, in
which one Hank Fisher was q witness,
three or four of the lawyers were discuss
ing among themselves the variety of testi-
mOny deduced, when Gen. B., with his
usual vehemence, said: "There neverwas
such liar on the witness-stand as that
Hank Fisher; he is undoubtedly the
biggest liar l ever knew;' when the
whole party were somewhat abashed at
seeing Hank, who heard the Generals re-
mark, step up to him. Ibid you say |
was the biggest liar you ever saw ?"
"That is about what said," stammering
ly came from the General, who expected
fight Hank eyed him for moment, then
said: 81 guess you didntknow my BROTH
er John. - Virginia (Ne0) Enterprise.
A DOCTOR of France has invented ma
chine by means of which an over-anxious
mother may assure herself from day to
day, or even from hour to hour, that the
baby is doing satisfactorily as regards its
ordinary cradle, to suit the taste, fitted
with a balance underneath which will tell
the exact weight of the cradle and its con-
tents, without any need of disturbing the
child. 1t is said that after two complete
days of life child weighs four ounces
less than at birth. When a week old it
will be the same weight as at birth. From
seven days to five months the average in
crease should be three-quarters of an
ounce daily. At five months the weight
should be double that at birth. AT sixteen
months the weight should be double that
at five months. OF course infants vary
from time to time, and each individual
has a rule of its own; the great point is
that growth ought to be constant
CONSIDERING that the following comes
from British source, it is not very bad
1t is going the rounds of the English
railway smoking carriages. For, be it
known, in these carriages so much envied
by the ladies, social harmony animates
the travellers, and they talk just as if they
were not reserved frst-class Britons.
This is not a smoking compartment,
sir" said an indignant lady, pausing on
the step and glaring at the smoker.
"Very likely" said the smoker, "You
have no right to smoke here, sir; and if
you don't desist l must cali the guard"
said the lady Every likely" was the
reply. 81 shall be choked." "Very
likely" "Why do you smoke, sir, when
objectYn why, madam, tobacco is
capital disinfectant, and, as l am pro-
fessionally engaged at StOckwell Small
Pox Hospital, T." The lady got out.
" / feel as if should faint" every
likely" was the response as the traveller
pulled up both windows to enjoy all his
smoke.-Harper's AGgdsias for Norember.
A CORRESPONDENT OF the Hartford Post
relates the following incidents which came
under his observation in Longmeadow,
Mass. A pair Of horses that had been
used during the week in teamwork to
Springfield on Sunday were harnessed
and driven to the door and left unhitched,
and the family hainU rather tardV that