National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1875-01-28
CHAPTER OF ACCIDENTS.

A Slight Breeze on Missouri Avenue.
The placid tranquility Of Missouri avenue has
never been so RULED since the time when MT.
Curtis dragged his mother through the street by
the hair, account of some slight difference con-
corning the proper manner Of cooking a chicken,
as it was on Tuesday night. A lady who may be
called Miss Elite, in order to preserve identity,
was cOmbinP out false curl, and occasionally
caTessing little bunch Of froWEy hair that was
under the bed and fancied that she saw a mans
form. She ont into the hall, screaming
Murder ~ and implOrlng some person to come
but another lady came out into the hall and
struck up partnership with her in the pOU-wow
throwing themselves into each others arms.
When Miss Elite had sufficiently recovered her
breath, she exclaimed, 1.-THE man! The man
The two started back to Miss Elites room, and
after quick look under the bed, resulting in
teeing a face, which. in their imagination, was
bloated and Vallainous, they went out into the
hall and set up fresh bowling.
The colored man who is employed about the
house to do the marketing and look ugly when
picture agents call, appeared upon the scene
then, and was sent up stairs with candle to
hrnt out the marauder.
A young lawyer, who happened to be passing
at that time heard the noise and gallantiy hast
ened to the rescue with his young and hopeful
bosom thrilling with chiValric enthusias m, and
was also detailed to skirmish about up stairs
after the villain. He stumbled through several
rooms kicking over the furniture and scattering
the contents Of the wardrobes, and stepped out
into the hall again just In time to meet stall
wsrt cOlored man with an extiugushed candle
in his hand, which in the imperfect light, he mis-
took for pistol.
Rt i've steps to the straddle, and rushed by the
ladies yelling for come one to be kind enough to
furnish him with club. The colored man came
TattliDg down close behind him shouting "StOp
thief! stop theft there goes the pusilanimous
euss." The two ladies skipped out after the col
orod man. and the whole four strung along
nd hall ufr ha
the ladies overlook the colored man, who had the
lawyer turned down over a carriage step and was
making efforts to disfgure his countenance. The
lawyer called upon the crowd to arrest the black
villain, but the crowd was not at all obliging.
As soon as Miss Elite comprehended the case
she made explanations that set everything right.
except the lawyers nose, which had been worked
two degrees to the starboard Of its natural 10
cality.
The crowd then returned to the house. Seven
Of the biggest and most vigorous men were Sc
lected to secure the wretch, who was supposed to
be still lOafng in the nighborhood Of Miss FIte's
bed. Seven pairs OF knees felt weak as they as.
ceIded the stairs, armed with fence pckets, coal
seuttles and such other weapons as the immediate
vicinity furnished.
leader called out to the person or persons con-
eeRled under IL to dig out In the name OF the ago
niEed people Of Missouri avenue As no one dug
ont, the leader .peeped under and discovered a
little foot, which he seized and dragged out. The
foot proved TO bClOng'to little child.
Further investigation produced more children,
and the COMMITTEES marched down stairs dragging
their little captiyes after them in triumph, and
all was quiet again on the Missouri The only
other Incidents of the occurrence are that Mr..
MeTilley who boards near that locality, got II
into his head somehow or other that there was a
FIRE, and spent an hour and q half trying to pry
open an alarm box with o brick, and that three
policemen called around some time after the
avenue had subsidized to see whether they could
be Of any service, but the family didn't know Of
anything they had for them to do unless they
were willing to help the colored man to shovel In
O load of coal, but they declined and withdrew
The affair will live for some time yet In the mem
DRY of n lawyer, who Is roaming around the city
with kink in his nose, and several little children
who wonder when they will be able to sit down
with as much freedom as they use to.