The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1875-09-04

Il is one of the curiosties of natural
history that horse enjoys his food
most when he hasn't Il bit in his
mouth.
4 city horse dealer recently found a
way 10 make balky horse go. lie
took him to n strange town aud Put
him up at auction lie went for five
dollars.
Josh Billings remarks: The only
way TO git thru this world and cskape
censure and abuse IL to take some back
road. You kant travel the main turn
pike and do it.
A Philadelphia has broken his leg
I'm irving TO get his boot on This Is
probably the first instanc on record in
which Il Philadelphia has failed to
put his foot in it.
1t is fact. Secretary Robson Of
the navy is expected shortly ut WASH
ingtou. He only goes on dying visit,
and don't mean to be mutinous. Il Cou-
rier-I journal,
Jenny Lind finds consolation in the
fact that notwithstanding the loss Of
her voice, she can make just as good
bread rs ever. Her genuine successes
We're always in the East.
A married man bought spring chick
en- in the market the other morning,
and now he thinks there twas cali
led spring chicken is because il will take
him until next spring TO carve it, unless
he uses nitro-glycerine.
A father fearing an earthquake in
the region OF his home, sent MS TWO
boys to q distant friends until the peril
should be over. A few weeks after the
father received this letter from his
friend: "please take your boys home |
and send down the earthqnnke.'
A precocious boy was asked which
was the greater evil 0fthe two, hurting |
anothcr's feelings, or his finger? lie
said the former. Fright, my dear
child,r said the gratiiied queslioner.
".And why is it worse to hurt the leel-
ings? "Becnuse you can't tie Il rag
around thenl," explained the dear
child.
A woman walked into n house at
Rutland the other day where two req
flags were displayed, ana sitting down
asked when it would commence.
what commence The auction, OF
course When told that the ilags
meant smallpox, and not auction she
turned all the colors Of the rainbow ana
disappeared as though the Deputy
sheriff was after her.
An fashioned clergyman named
More, was riding OIL horseback one
stormy day, enveloped in u loose cloak
of large proportions and having u
broad, scarlet collar BY the action OF
the wind, the cloak was tossing about
in all directions, when n gentleman
rode up on spirited horse, which
SHE'D and almost threw the rider.
"That cloak would frighten the devil"
said the gentleman. "Nou don't say
so % replied Mr.. More; "why, that's
Just my trade"
A boy of five years old was "playing
railroad" with his sister Of two and II
half. Drawing hernpon n foots0ol, he
imagined himself both the engine and
conductor. After initiating the pull
ing noise of the steam, he stopped ana
called out "New York." and in mo-
ment after, "paterson," and then
"Philadelphia" His knowlege OF
towns was now exhausted, and the next
place, he cried Heaven" His little
sister said eagerly: Top | DIES III
Diet out here.n
A farmer on the road between CHAR
iton and Worcester, Mass, having .
been terribly annoyed by drummers,
put up sign; "No sewing machines
wanted here. Got one" 1t was no
use; the next drummer wanted to see
the machine, "and perhaps he'd hlteh {
up a trade" So the farmer put up
IDIOT the smallpox here" That work
ed very well for a little while, tut then
came along drummer frightiully pit
ted with the smallpox, who suddenly
said "Seein' you've got it bad here
they mt me on this route"