The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1875-08-20
marx Twain on Spelling.


There was a spelling-match at the
Asylum Hill Congregational church,
Hartford, Conn, on Wednesday evening,
and Samuel Clemens MARK TwaiR) be-
ing called on for few remarks, spoke as
follows.
LADIES AND GENTLEAfEx-I have been
honored with the Office of introducing
these approaching Orthographical seiem-
mites with few remarks. The temper
ance crusade swept the land some time
ago, that is, the vast portion of the land
where it was needed, but it skipped
Hartford. Now comes this new spelling
epidemic, and this time zoe are stricken.
So suppose we needed the afliction. 7
don't say we needed it, fer l don't see
any use in spelling a word right, and
never did mean don't see any use
In having q uniform and arbitrary way of
spelling words. We might as well make
an clothes alike and cock all dishes alike.
Sameness Is tlresOme, variety is pleasing.
have q correspondent whose letters are
always q Fefreshment to mel there is
such q beeezy, Rnfettered originality
about his photography. He always spells
KoW with large &. Now, that is, just
as good as to spell it with > small one.
Il Is better. 1t gives the imagination
broader field, q wider scope. lt suggests
to the mind a grand, vague, impressive,
new kind Of COW. Superb effects can
be produced by yariagating spelling.
Now, there is blind Tom, the musical
prodigy. He always spells a word ac>
eording to th Q sound that Is carried TO
his ear. And he is an enth usiast IN or
biography. When you give him a
word he shouts it outputs all his soul
into it. once heard him called upon to
spell oranR>Outrang before an audience.
He said, 90, r-a~n>g, orang, ger, ger
Granger, tang, tang, oranggertang "
Now, anybody can respect an orangout>
rang that spells his name in vigorous,
way like that But the. feeble die
tionary makes mere kitten of him. In
the old times people spelled just as they
pleased. That was the right idea. You
hal two chances at a stranger then. Yuo
knew Q strong man from g weak one by
his iron-clsd spelling, and his hand writ
ing helped him TO verify your verdict.
Some people have an idea that correct
spelling can be taught-and taught to
anybody. That is q mistake. The spell>
ing faculty is born in a man, like poetry,
music, and art It is gift. lt is a tal~
| SLt. 6ORt6 WHO nave blAls ElA6 ia y ulEu
degree only neei to see a word once in
print and it is forever photographed;upon
their memory. They cannot forget it
People who havn't it must be content to
spell more or less ike-like thunder
and expect to splinter the dictionary
where yer their photographed lightning
| happens to strike.
There is a game called Yerbarium. A
dozen people are each provided with a
sheet of paper, across the top of which is
written long word like kaleidoscOplcal
or something like that and the game is
to see who can make up the most words
oct of that in three minutes, always be-
ginning with the initial letter of the
word Upon one occasion the word
chosen was coffeFdam. When time was
called everybody had built from fVe &c
twenty words except q young lady. She
only had one Word-calf We all studS
led a moment, and then said; Why
there is no | in cofferdam " Then we
examined her paper, 10 the eternal
honor of that uniaspired, Unconscious,
sublimely independent soul be it said
she had spelled that word "caff L
anybody here can spell calf any more
sensibly than that, let him step to th'
front aud take his milk. The insu rree'
ton will now begin.