The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1875-09-30
THE SODA FOUNTAIN BOY


THE SODA FOUNTAIN BOY
He was rinsing the glasses when
the old lady entered the store. It was
hot weather, and the soda fountain
locked 80 tempting that she conquer
ed her avarice and walked over and
told the boy she would take glass.
Do you wish for fly In It ?'' he
inquired In a whisper.
A fly grashus no she replied, a
look Of disgust on her face.
Just as you say, madam" he went
on a. he drew some lemon syrup.
people are 50 different In tastes, you
know. Some object to flies and same
don't. I'll mix some pineapple syrup
with this lemon: and now, will you
have great deal Of gas and a little
water, or great deal of water and lit
tie gas ?"
"I'm mighty thirsty" she said.
"Well, then, you want more water
than gas, and there won't be so much
danger of an explosion"
Explosion ?n queried.
"That was the word, madam. We
have had but few such accidents here
this summer, and truly hope that we
may have no more"
docs soda water blow ap folks ?"
"That depends on the state of their
health. Some people could stand
here and drink all day, while others
might tip mp the glass this way, and
boom they'd go :"
"Bust 2"
"Yes'm-fy into a thousand pieces.
You never saw a human being ex-
plod, did you ?"
mercy, no ~
"Well, you don't have the least
warning. They may be laughing or
talking. aud all at once the store is
filled with false hair, monograms, gar
tsrs, bustles, corsets, feet. teeth, and
rolled plate jewelry. 1t makes q great
muss around here, and if we had't
three of the smartest negroes in town
to pick up and sweep out, we'd have
to shut up store for whole afternoon
after an explosion"
He stood with glass in his hand
agitating the syrup, and waiting; and
she said:
az didn't suppose it was dangerous
stuff
"Well, as told you, it depends on
the state of the system. If your liver
is torpid and digestion impaired, one
glass of soda water would blow you
higher than Gilderoy's kite, and the
coroner would be lucky to find 80
much as your spectacles to hold an in
quest on. Ifyour system is all right
you might drink a hundred glasses
and feel no disastrous effects. Now,
then, you'll have q good deal of water
and but little gas, eh 2"
She made a depretory motion, and
asked
"How's the stuff made ?n
"Well, can't go on and explain all
the process. There is marble-dust,
acid, gas, sugar-coated pills, giant
powder, cologne-water, and kerosene
all mixed together and then distilled |
liquid is placed in a retort, where a |
chemical action separates it, and the |
gas forces 1t up separate pipes"
kerosene and pills :" she gasped.
"That's what I said, madam. You
look Innocent and honest, and I hope
you won't say any thing about it. RI
tend this fountain in order to support |
. widowed mother and seven children.
If you should say anything, I'd be dis
charged should commit suicide; You |
will have plenty Of water, eh p
No, sir, I won't" !" she replied. "Do
you suppose I'd drink acids and kero.
sene ?n
Not In their crude state, madam, but |
this process"
81 don't care for the process ~ she
snapped. 81 won't touch the stuffw
''It Is . mild Leverage, madam, and
the doc"
"Well, don't want any. When I
go to swallering tar and lard and kero-
sene you'll know it! s'posen I'd drank
some and explodedW
"Don't mention itv' he whispered.
"Don't speak of !"
"I'm sorry for you, young man, but
there's a constable living right near
our house, and think-I-In
"You'lI drive me to suicides grave,
you meant ~
She lowered her spectacles, took q
long look at him, and went out with
out replying.