The weekly democratic statesman. [volume] (Austin, Tex.) 1871-1883, 1875-10-07

There is vastly more truth than fictien IL
the prevailing idea outside OF journalistic
circles that it costs some editors nothing tc
live, travel or get everything that heart
could wish for. To the great discredit oi
the profession this is too true in the case OF
some who think it only necessary to have
the name on their cards followed by ''edi-
tor" or ''edItor and proprietor" This
highly favored individual looks upon him
self as u sort of chosen son usually son
Of gum and as such can get anything he
| desires, from the first dive at a free lunch
10 a steamboat, or controlling interest IN
a gold mine. While ordinary people are
puzzling their brains to know how they are
| to get into the circus, he swaegers about
like bloated bond-holder with bis pockets
stuffed with tickets marked compliment
ary.p one of which he hands in at every
performance with the aiI OF Il man who had
paid a five dollar bill for each Of them. lie
condescendingly attends ell the church
festivals and with the fortitude OF martyr
suffers himself to be cTammed with Ice
cream and cake, for which be pays by say
ing IN the next issue of his paper, that 1t
was good, adding puff for sae ladies who
waited on the tables. But If You want TO
see this character exhibit the strength and
versatility of ''cheek"-an irrepressibie,
irresistible, almighty, never-say-die kind OF
''cheek"-iust send him eff on an excur-
sion. II he is linguist enough to pronounce
the magical word ''editDr" IN all the Ian
glages know to men, he will undertake to
travel the world over with nothing IN his
pocket but copy of his paper. In Illus
tratlon of this a good story Is told OF
Texas editor who left his prairie home dur
ing the present century. in company
with other editors, composing that nearest
approach to perpetual motion, termed an
editorial excursion party" They Travelled
10 st. Louis, thence to Chicago, Niagara
Falls, New York, Boston, Philadelphia,
Cincinnati and Louisville. At the last
named place our hero got separated from
the party, which had gone TO do" the
Mammoth Cave. He reached the depot IN
time to miss the train. He was in great
tribulatioI, and soon. made his way to the
ticket office of the Memphis aud Louisville
Railroad, where he found the general ticket
agent, to whom he unbosomed himself. He
was travelling with an editorial excursion
party which left that morning. for the
Mammoth Cave he had been left behind,
and wanted to know of the agent how he
was TO rejoin his party. The genial Atmore
looked at his watch and informed the ex-
cursiOnist what time the next train would
leave, and suggested that the best way
for him to reach Cave City was to purchase
a ticket and board the next train.
''But sir,n answered the editor, 81 have
only 3.5O--not enough to pay for ticket.
In fact, sir, started from home with only
81, of which have already spent half, and
our trip is not half ended. A gentleman in
travelling should always be prepared for
emergencies, and may yet have occasion to
use all the funds have"
Col. Atmore's eyes opened degree or
two as he gazed upon the excursionist, and
the excursionst smiled pleasantly as he
mentally asked himself: ''Will he never
tumble2 Is the free list suspended"
AS soon as the dispenser of passes re-
covered his speech he asked: 'Do you
mean to say, sir, that you have travelled
from Texes to st. Louis, Chicago, Niagara
Falls, New York, Boston, Philadelphia,
CINCINNATI and Louisville, eat three meals
day, slept in bed every night, took your
regular allowance of stiEnulant every day,
smoked cigars aud visited al! the places of
amusement, and did it on SO. 5Ol"
The agent took a piece of paper and a
pencil and commenced figuring. In few
minutes he had added up the the expenses
OF an ordinary mortal who would travel the
same route, and opposite placed the sum of
the expenses of the editor, $3.50; but his
effort TO solve this seeming kuotty problem
proved failure. Presently bright thought
struck him, and he turned to the excursion
list and asked:
.'Are you an eXcursionistF
''Yes, sir, of the most radical type"
The agent with satisfied air looked
again at his row of figures standing opposite
the $3.50, aud in language that might be
mistaken for irony, he SAID:
''Ohl Ahl see. 1t is very plain now.
You have got your initiation ideas down to
very fine point, sir. With your imitation
KEY, sir, that SO. 80 looks as though il could
very easily swallow the column of expenses. I"
The agent was so overcome with the
beauties of this new theory that he imme-
diately wrote pass for the excursionist
and sent HIM rejoicing in the direction OF
Cave City.