Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1875-10-21
VARIETY ANp HBMOR.

will agree with you.
The best time for light shower is
during dark night
California has a poet named "Gassa-
way" and he does it. =
A MARYLAND man is named Henry To
bacco, and he does not smoke.
-"The only way to look at "a lady's
faults" exclaimed super-gallant, " is to
shut your eyes"
The Chicago bar, at the beginning OF
the recent vacation of the courts, could
boast of over 900 lawyers.
An engineer from the Black Hills re-
ports gold at twenty cents cord ana
bread at one dollar crumb.
The hog crop for the year is estimated
at 49, O00, 900 head, and it will soon be
time to begin sailing it down.
"A sweet potato plantation of 700 acres
near Atlanta, Ga, is expected to yield 40
900 bushels Of the favorite edible.
-" And the spears shall be turned into
pruning hooks" At Salt Lake cavalry
swords are sold for corn-cutters.
Gambling in New York city is said to
be well-nigh extinct, owing to the liabili-
tyof any person entering gambling-house
to be arrested.
The levers Of oysters will be delighted
TO learn that ancient oystermen are pre-
dieting the best season for that sort of sea
fruit since 1860.
1t is we'll to be rich, but the Rochester
Democrat remarks that, in view Of the
State prison and things, 1t is better to be
so on your own money.
Virginia is jubilant over the fact that
the crops of corn and tobacco are the most
bountitul that have been produced in the
State for a number OF years.
-" Young Man. Afraid of HIS Horses"
singularly enough, wasn't averse to de
handing several of those awe-inspiring
quadrupeds from the Government.
"A suffering veteran of Albany, N. Y,
got himself into trouble the other day by
inquring where the Army Of the Gu
cumberland" was holding its reunion.
A yoEng lady who reached Portland,
Ore. direct from Germany, recently, be-
came homesick, and started for her moth
cr's home in Fatherand again in thirty
hours.
The lcather-dealers are going to have
an exhibition of their own at Philadel-
phia, and have obtained lot 200 by 300
feet, facing the main exhibition, for that
purpose.
A middlea aged German lady was very
much disappointed at Norwich, Conn,
few days ago, when she found she could
not send the key Of u trunk to Il station by
telegraph,
--Politeness is to - man what beauty is
to a woman. 1t creates an instantaneous
impression in his behalf, while the oppo-
site quality exercises as quick prejudice
against him.
Out in Nevada, if we are to believe
newspaper statistics, the atmosphere is so
light that cord of wood left out over
night viii shrink to three-quarters of u
cord before morning
John Schneider, of Detroit biga
mist, was lately killed by railroad train
just ~ his misdoings were getting him in
TO trouble So they didn't get such a
"bg thing ON Schneider" as they antici
pated,
In Savannah, Ga, the desire for
peaceful and quiet Sabbath is SO general
that all business is suspended on that day
and not a door is open To invite trade. One
third of the white population is composed
of Roman Catholics and Jews, who con.
form strictly to the public sentiment on
this subject
A good story comes from Brooklyn
DIR Jerome Walker, one of the brighter
medical lights of the new generation, had
just been writing letter ut the dictation
of sick soldier. "Ah, docthor,' said the
sick man, just rs the letter was being
closed, "wad yer PLACE ask 'em 10 eX-
cusho mistakes in spelin' and writin'."
The habits Of old days We're strong in
death,
In Oregon the grades of Official i'm.
porunre are carefully preserved. When
aJustlcc ui the Peace was inSulted lately
he considered IL beneath his dignity 10
punish the offender, and therefore called
a Constable TO ayenge the slight But
when the Constable had been thoroughly
thmNhcd he told the Justice that the
Court might fight for himself thereafter
dignity was a very good thing, but those
that had il ought to have enough muscle
10 support il,
The Nick>hurg Hvaid SAYS: " As an
innocent looking old man was going up
Washington street yesterday dravman
nodded at him, and asked; Want
dray, mistcr| MOO, | guess not, re-
piled the old man; I'm too fur from home
and can't pay freight on it. Much
oblcegcd, though Nicksburg is power
ml nice town \ fellow back here asked
wc if didn't want coat, another in
quired il ! wanted q hack, and now YOU
offer me a dray! | wish lived here"
Jones is engaged to Il pretty and prac.
tical girl. Her birthday is Oct, /. This
morning Jones received a note from her
which said. Dear Jack, | feared You
might send me a bouquet for birthday
present as youdid last year, and thought
I'd suggc,l ,o YOU that parlor stove or