The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1875-08-05
An Obliging Hotel Guest.

The other evening a kind-looking old
man was escorted to a room on the third
| floor of hotel to pass the night, and it
| wasn't five minutes before the bell indi-
Gated that he wanted to see waiter. A
colored boy ran up, stuck his head into
the room and asked what was wanted.
The old man said he didn't want any
thing, but the waiter was hardly down
stairs before the bell rang again.
did you want suffin p he inquired, as
he reached the room again.
Nothing" replied the old man, as he
opened the door.
In about two minutes his bell rang
again, md this time the waiter ex-
! claimed:
"If you don't want noffin' what are you
pullin' de bell fur?"
81 want to oblige the waiter" replied
the old man.
de waitah Oblige de waitah p
"Yes, it says here: Please to ring the
bell for the waiter and if he wants it
rung I'm willing to oblige him, though
L m tired and sleepy, and shan't pull it
more'n four times more unless know
that some of his family are sick
ONE IDEA OF PovERTY-It was Bulwer
who said that in nine cases out of ten,
thousand dollars a year suffer more want
of means than others with three hundred.
| The reason is, the richer man has arti-
fetal wants. His income is ten thousand,
and he suffers enough from being dunned
for unpaid debts to kill sensitive man
he who earns dollar day, and who
does not run in debt is the happier of the
two. Very few people who have never
been rich will believe this, but it is true.
IL u. i
princely incomes who never knew a mo-
ment's peace, because they live beyond
their means. There is really more hap.
piness in the world among the working
people than among those who are called
rich-always providing the poor folk do
not, in a smaller way, emulate the prod
igality of their richer brethren. Poverty
is simply question of the good or bad
management of money in hand.
The steamer Fanny was coming down
the Upper Mississippi, loaded with pig
lead. As she was going over a shoal
the lead. The only man forward was a
green Irishman. "Why don't you heave
the lead p lis it the lead, yer honor
Where to?" Overheard, you block
head r' The Irishman snatched up one
of the pigs of lead and threw it over
board the mate, in endeavoring to pre-
vent him, lost his balance and fell into
the river. The captain, running to the
deck, asked, why don't you heave the
lead and sing out how much water there
is?' THE lead is heaved, yer honor,
and the mates gone down to see how
much waterthere is"
Be MAN-Foolish spending is the fa-
ther of poverty. Do not be ashamed of
work Work for the wages you can get,
but work for half price rather than be
idle. Be your own master, and do not
let fashion or society swallow up your in
dividuality-hat, coat and boots. Com
pei your selfish body to spare something
for profits saved. See that you are proud.
Let your pride be of the right kind. Be
too proud toSbe lazy; too proud to give
up without conquering every difficulty
too proud to wear a coat you cannot af-
ford to buy; too proud to be in company
you cannot keep up with in expenses;
too proud to lie, or steal, or cheat; too
proud to be stingy.
How He KEPT AcCoUNr.-An old farmer
purchased some sweet oil in drug store
recently, and, being asked if there was
nothing else" he laid several packages
on the counter, held up band with sew
eral strings tied on the fingers, and said
Lets see That red string is for the
bar soap; that rag is for a broom; that
blue cord is for calico dress; that dress
braid means four pounds of sugar, and
this other string means sweet oil. No
nothing more"
- .s.S- ----..-A- de
"What under the sun can be the cause
of that bell ringing to,dayP" said young
Sam to his friend, as they approached
country village "If were to express
an opinion on the subject" returned
Isaac, solemnly, II should say it is my
deliberate conviction that somebody is
pulling the rope.
A Frenchman learning the English
language complained og the irregularity
of the verb ITO go the present tense OF
which some wag had written out for him
as follows II go; thou startest; he de
parts; we lay tracks; you cut sticks
thav ahsnuatulata or slSadaddla -