The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1875-05-22
NUMBER 81.
Laughing Gas.

The fellow who asked for lock Of
his girls hair was informed that & it
costs money, hair does"
A Long Branch baker has received
news OF a ten thousand dollar legacy.
He'll probably knead it.
=. An Irish doctor lately sent in hie
bill to lady as follows: "To cur
ing your husband till he died.
The children in Florida say they
live Oh sweet potatoes in the summer.
and on strangers in the winter.
, A patent churn, invented by a Sioux
squaw, is on exhibition at Washing
ton. 1t shows considerably Immunity.
A Milwaukee lady, who paid $50
to have = wart removed from her
nose, now wants to know what has
become OF the nose. :.
The Wisconsin farmer who lef. a
candle burning in the barn SO as to
scare thieves away has no barn to
1 watch now.
4 " Are there any fools in this city ~
asked q stranger of a newsboy. s.No.
do You feel lonesome was the re..
ply. :.
John Anderson of Indiana didn't
WIN the prize at spelling match.
OUT ne licked the man who pronounced
the hard words, and that was consol-
ing. ''<>''
Its now claimed that David drueeed
Goliath. Wealways thought it strange
that such a great, hearty fellow ss
Goliath should 50 completely be over
come by a little sling.
A Boston woman, gazing at Mead,a
statue Of Ethan Allen on the portico,
OF the State House ut Mnatpe)ier. ex-i
claimed: Wal, l declare. that's
about the meaness pietrre Of George,
Washington 1 ever se...n
A Green Bay mother wont leave
the room when Sarah's beau calls. and
Sarah's beau makes Il remark or two
about navigation, slides along to his
hat, says it's nice weather and Greens!
out. ''''>~ =,
Unless Milwaukee girl can take. a.
brick in each hand and make eight
feet and four inches ut Il standing
Jump, she rarely gets admitted into.
the best society
:" Is this the Ata4mss. House ~ askedj
stranger vi B4,stonian. "Yes.v
was the reply, tits Adams House,
onnl you get to the root, then it's
caves"
Scott tells STORY of Il, gentleman
who, irritated at so,1n, n,istu,,,dnnt re
his servant, said, '..hbn, either lyeu'
or must quit the he,l,st. ~ "Yern
weei, sir,7 said Jshn.;. s'where will
your honor be ssng;ng to 7"
A New Orleans. woman's INSANITY
induces her to shout ..s4ep thief"
whenever she sees anybody running
In the street, aud. several staid old
men, upon stsyting 2. briskly for a hoys4.
Car, nave been eiissed aud captured
IN consequence .f1hcr outcries.
A bad little b*ra upon being prom
ised five cents sy: His mother If he
would take dose ct. asstos oil. oh
tanned the money, anG!silen, told His
parent that she might castor Gil i'm
the street.
An Atchison, Kan, girl, ate four.
pounds OF wedding cake IN order, tliat
she might dream Of her future lhs..
oand. And now she says that money.
wouldn't hire her to marry the man
she saw III that dream.
A Dubuque printer received the.
following note from his girl: May
GIT yanked out Of bed at midn,te-
every mite by a cuss like Theydoro,
lllton, an carried upp million pare
o1 stares, lit ever | sese to love YOU.
JIM" '
A man in digging load of sand
from a sand bank in Seneca Falls was
buried to his shoulders BY an ava
lanche OF the treacherous earth. When
discovered by his friends he had been
planted about three hours, and was
beginning to grow-tiiseouraged.
There are times when all of a wo-
mans seif-possession and dignity are
required. That is when she shows
her first baby, a llare-lipped one, to
an old beau, whom she has Tilted for
the sake Of her present husband.
I" should think you would be
ashamed to pitch into that little boy"
said pedestrian, as he caught big
bootblack cutting a small newsboy.
" Ye would, hoy z" sneered the lad.
as he gave his nose wipe. "D'ye
think I'd go for big boy aud get all
pounded up?"
A man was standing on street
corner telling crowd that he had
been out and killed five hundred
pigeons since sunrise. You're
liar!" shouted a man in tile edge of
the crowd. The stranger looked at
him long and earnestly, and then in
qnircd: " Where did YOU get ac-
qnainted with me z"
s Y"u may talk" says the Milwau-
kee Ners, about marrying an leiress,
a delicate human blossom, fairy, an
angel; but give us girl like Nancy
Terwilliger Of La Crosse, who rap out
OF doors the other night, and strad-