American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1875-01-09
How an Austin City Fashion Reporter
Lived and Died.

THE fashion reporter of an Austin City
(Nev) paper described the belle of the
masquerade ball in the following astound-
ing language: 1.-The most gorgeous,
stunning, high-toned, richest, fastest
classest, incest, or any other adjective for
costume in the outfit was that worn by
Miss frankie Clarke. She was the high
falutinist, gayest, and galusest dressed
gal in the room. She appeared as page,
and she was page that no man would
leave any other, read. Both in costume
and action she was as perfect as big
sunflower." A couple of days after the
appearance of the notice into the edito-
rial room of the paper stalked young
man. His brow was wrapped in thunder,
his body in suit of tweed, and his
hands clasped big lump of hickory.
He pulled paper out of his pocket, and,
pointing his finger to the paragraph,
said: 81 want ter see the man as wrote
that ere." Il am the individual" re-
piled the person. swat did yer go and
do it for, that's wat l want to know"
oh, because l thought you'd like to see
your girl made out one of the most be-
witching females that was ever sent on
earth to keep a man from his hash and
drive balmy sleep from his pillow"
Now, look here. Ever sence that was
published l can't get word out of her.
She sets in front of the looking glass and
keeps gain on herself, and maxim
squint eyes at her dress, and puckerin'
up her mouth and actin as if she were
blasted sight better'n anybody else.
want this ere thing fixed or there'n be
a editors situation vacant" He looked
Significantly at the club. For moment
the reporter stood IN profound thought;
then his face frightened and he said:
" I'll fix it in next weeks paper. After
you've seen the next issue call and tell
me the result" The young man left. In
the next weeks paper appeared the fol-
lowing paragraph:
A Commemorative made a grave mistake in
masquerade ball we accidentally substituted the
name of Miss frankie Clarke for that of Miss
the frst-named lady must have discovered the
error. 1t is true that she appeared for what was
more like a boot black in hard luck She is not
goodlooking her actions were absurd, and every
man in the room kept as far from her as possible.
She thinks of moving out of this community as
it's unappreciative. When she goes she will be
escorted out of the town by brass band. The
them
The next day the young man entered
the office. In his hand he bore a rifle
and his belt was ornamented with a big
ix-shooter and tremendous bowie
knife. He sailed up to the reporter. :"
look warlike, don't l? l don't feel a bit
hev seen her when she read that correc-
ton. Why, she jest danced jig with
madness and she sot down and cried,
and then she come up and threw her
arms around my neck and said: Arthur,
do you love me?' You bet your best
bonnet on that said /. We'll, never
expect me to speak to you agair if you
don't go and kill the Teller wat writ that
SANDER In course | promised
nd I Tn III q
long and heartily. After time he
Quoted down, and the reporter said: Z" /
suppose, in order to make it all right be-
tween you and your girl, I've got to be-
come corpse. I'll do it. Sit there
minute, and I'll fix the business" He
sat down at a desk and scrubbed away
for a few minutes, and then returned
with a sheet of paper on which was
written:
announce the sudden death of Mr. Charles Keller,
the young and talented fashion editor In q
moment of mental alteration he had slandered
an estimable. accomplished and beautiful young
lady of this city, named Miss frankie Clarke
Yesterday her betrothed called at this office and
asked for the author of the slander aud, when ne
discovered him, shot him dead on the spot. rms
paper WE Ss nd IA 20 to- iii the place left
vacant by Mr. Keller. Though cratic, he was
tentiyely to stale stories and drink more bad
whisky than any man in Austin r. l. r.
That's your sort" said the Infatuated
lover. ''That's the thing to a L. Come
along, MIR. Corpse, and hist little light
ming" The lady was satisfied when the
paragraph appeared in the next issue of
the paper, her lover was regarded as
hero, and the Austin paper ceased to give
reports of fashionable balls.
In one of our Walnut street dry
goods houses is employed young man
of diminutive stature and somewhat
feminine appearance, although tip-top
salesman and clerk One day, not long
since, little girl was sent to the store
to make some purchases, and 1t fell to
the lot of this young man to attend to
her She was a mere bunch of feminin-
ity, not able to talk plain. She asked If
he had any "totten flannel" he replied
that he had, and asked how much she
wanted Il don't know" was the reply.
We'll, what do you want it fors" said
the clerk Want TO make papa shirt"
% Well, how big is your papa; is ne as
hip as mes" "Big as YOU l." said the little