Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1875-01-02
SPICE-'BO

getting trcd of ourselves.
Why i~ siIesadd!c Ike four.quart jug ,
Because j, holds gallon.
Love without money is something like pat
ent leather boots without soIcs.
The Charity that begins At home ism, the
kind that covers multitude Of SINS.
Each bnar plucks leaf from a coqueue /;
81 that tliorns only remain tor the husband.
A number Of Alma (Wls) -rort>men WHO
chartad "A steamboat 10 so hunting, returned
with just one snipe.
There j, a man in New Jersey who has
not been 10 ch"rch Tor rwenty years Tie
boards al the State piI>' n, Trenton.
A Tennessee tuacral was delayed for hail
an hour tu allow 4 horse trade. Business be-
fore pleasure was the motto
The Young Mems Christian Association
Chicago, talk of moving ~ some CRY where
il won't be such hard work
In some parts Of the county, when wo
man begins to get red a, the roos o { her hair,
II Is regarded as a stDrm-signa
Rather than see it neglected. thrifty Fast
ern farmeris raising Potatoes on the grave Of
Tom. Paine.
Artificial butter making has never proved
success. The difficulty lies in rurtug in
the hairs so that they look natural.-Tyre
HQuie Gqr
young fellow in Grnndy county, Iowa.
wanted 10 charge his girl 20 cent. for hi.
picture, Informing her a, the time that i, origi-
nally cost quarter.
a Milwaukee womsns bonnet costs upon
an average. abou, SIS. b,r she has the bill
made out for $50 or Si0 in order to show it
TO the woman next door.
young lady uptown has discarded the
use Of false hair, and thrown away her CHG.
non, with the remark, There's millions in
II. Very probable VaSh Chron.
The humor Of the clerks ofihe B,ngor Me }
Post-othce, finds expression in sticking pos,
age stamp on the II ,or and laughing at the
people who try to pick it up.
Another Atlantic cable has gone to the bot
tom Of the sea. Whales with rheumatism. in
I the.r pnot-Jnlnts can now tyr the boasted bene
fits OF Observation-Disclosures Seniei
A Brookport man dreamed recently tha,
his aunt vas deal, aud the dream proved
true. He tried the same thing with his moth
er-inlaw, but it didn't work worth cent.
An experienced preacher says that i, is i'm
possible for a Sunday school scholar. with
boil, TO satsiactorlally fasten his mind down
even upon the simplest exposition of the
scheme Of salvation.
DR.. Carpenter asserts that New,on's law of
gravita'iou is a mere hypothesis. This is an
age of dIsenchantmeni. Even the man who
falls in love with beautiful head of hair too
often discovers that it is a mere hypothesis
too.
"Have you GoIdsmi,h's Greece - was
asked of the clerk in 4 store in which books
and various miscellaneous articles were sold.
NO. said the clerk rehectively, "ws haven't
Goldsmith S Greece, but we have some
splendid hair oii.'
Miss. Kellogg says that American girls
have the sweetest voice, in the world. When
one oil them puts her mouth to hole in the
ience and ''holers to the girl next door to
fetch back them crimpny irons. it fills the
air with melody.
Prudent moiher-"Don't look al Prof Won
Bun5s 30, Dora dear, or people will think you
are in love with him. Dora (who i. incon.
solable for the loss OF her darling poodle I'll
can help ii ma; he is the exact image of
poor Mopsy!'
! A minister who came into church duAng q
sudden shower requested another to preach
| for him, as he was wet. No. said the 9TH
er; preach yourself, you will be dry enough
! in the pulpit"
A spread-eaSle orator wanted the wings of
Ia bird to fly to every village and hamlet in
the broad land, bnt he wlted when naughty
boy in the crowd sang out: You'd be shot
for goose before you had flied a mile"
"ls there any person you wish me to mar
! ry?" said a wife to a dying spouse, who had
been somewhat of tyrant in his day. "Alar-
ry the devil il you like was the grufr reply.
| mo, | thank you, my dear, one husband Of
the same family is enough TO: me-
Maria is very popular name in Illinois.
When a cat climbs back fence in we'll
populated neigeborhood and planrively calls
out "Nariar! twenty or thirty windows are
hastily thiown up, from which protrude twen-
y or thirty female Sleads wildly answering
What
When old Sam Crowder, down in Pike,
was running for Justice of the Peace his wife;
IN anticipation of honoTs in store for her, said
an dear, when you get TO be Justice of the
Peace, what will | be-" "You,' said old Sam,
"why you'll be the sane old fool you always
was
A large bowl of batter and two tempers
were lost yesterday morning. man aud his
wife could not agree who should cook the
first halt dozen buck -wheats while the Other
consumed the melliiluous hapjacks. The
stove man thinks he can make it last the
winter for 81. The doctor and the 'pothecary
make So so each.
A chap from the Western part Of the State
went to bed at one Of the hotel. the other
! night, and blew out his gas instead Cf turning
| it oil. The gas rusned out, the room was
/ close. and in abont halt an hour the smell be-
came so strong that the stranger got out Of bed
| opened the door and shouted tor the clerk
| The clerk came up aud demanded TO know
/ what was up. Il never stopped III Detroi,
over night before replied the stranger, "and
| don know but this smell is all right, but it
! pears 10 me as # snnethiug bad busted some
where. Free Press.
- go -
An Eastern paper intima,es that