The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1875-01-14
SOCIABLE JIMMY.
Mark Twain In the New York Times.

II sent The following home in pri.
vatc letter some time ago from q Ger.
tain little village. 1t was in the DAYS
when 1 was public lecturer. 1 did
it because wished to preserve the
memory Of the most artless, sociable
and exhaustless talker ever came
across. He did not tell me single
remarkable thing, or one that was
worth remembering, and yet be was
himself so interested in his small mar
wells, and they flowed SO naturally and
comfortably from his lips, that his
talk got the upper hand of my interest,
too, and listened as one who receiv-
es revelation. took down what he
had to say just as he said it, without
altering q word or adding one.
! had my supper in my room this
evening Gas usual), and they sent up a
bright, simple, guiless little darkey
boy to wait on me-tcn years old-a
wide.eyed, observant little chap. /
said.
"What is your name my boy? ?"
"Ipey calls me Jimmy, sab but my
right names James, sah."
said, d,."Sit down there, Jimmy-I'll
not want you just yet"
He sat in a big arm chair, hung
both his legs over one of the arms, and
looked comfortable and conversational
/ said:
"Did you have a pleasant Christmas,
Jimmy?"
mo, sah-not zackly, was kind o
sick den. But de res, o de people
dcy had good time-mos' all NV 'em
had good time. Dey all got drunk.
Dey all gifts drunk heah, every Christ
mas, and carries on and has awful
good times"
$50 you were sick. and lost it all.
But unless you were very sick should
think that il you had asked the doctor
he might have let you get-set-a lit
tie drunk-and-'
sOh. no, sab Il dom never git drunk !;
it's de Whitc folks dem's de ones l
means. Pa used to git drunk, but dat
was befo' was big but he's done quit !;
he dom git drunk no mo, now; jis'
takes one nip in de mawDin' now, cuZ
his s omach rifles up, he sleeps so SCUM !;
jis' one nip. oyer TO dc s'loon, every
mawnin'. He's powerful sickly, pow
erful +; sometimes he can't hardly git
aroun' he can't. lie goes to de doctor
every week, over to Bagtown. An
one time he tuck some stuff, you know,
an it mighty near fetched him. Amt
it dis-yer blue-vittles dat's poisin
Amt dat it? Truck what you poisone
cats wild ?"
"Yes, blue vittles (vitrioD is very
convincing article with a cat"
"Well. den, dat was it. DE ole man,
he tuck de bottle and shuck it and
shuck it he seed it was blue, and he
didn't know but it was blue mass pills
but den he 'spected maybe dis-ycr
truck might be some other kin O blue
stuff, and so he sot de bottle down,
and drat if it want blue vittles, sho'
nuff, w hen dc doctcr come. An de
doctor he say if he'd tuck dat blue
vittles it would highsted him sho'.
People can't be too particlar bout sich
things. Yes, indeedy!
1--WE amt got no cats heah, bout dis
hotel. Bill he don't like 'em. He
can't STAN cat no way. Eff he was to
ketch one he'd slam it outen de win
der in minute.
Yes he would. Bills down on cats.
So is de gals-waiter gals. When dey
ketches cat bummin, aroun' heah,
dey jis' scoops minded dey do.
Dey snake him into de cistern--dey
been cats drowned in dat water dat's
i'm yo' pitcher. l seed a cat in dar
yestiddy--all swelled up like pudd'n.
bet you dem gals done dat. Ma says
if dey was to drownd a cat for her, de
fust one of dem she ketched she'd jam
her into de cistern long wild de cat.
Ma wouldn't do dat, 1 don't reckon,
but deed and double she would.
can't kill a chicken-well / kin ring
it's neck oil, cuz dat dent make 'em no
suferin scarcely !; but l ca.'t take and
chop dey heads off some people kin.
1t makes me feel $3.50 sell, kin sec
dat chicken mighty to's can't sleep.
Mr. Dunlap, he's de richest man in dis
town. Some people says dey's fo'
thousan' peoples in dis tOwn-dis city,
But Bill he lives dey amt but bout
thirty-three hunrd'd. Bill he knows,
cuZ he's sased heah all his life, do dey
do ws he won't never set de river ony
fire. dent know how dey fin out
wouldn't like to count all dem peo-
pie. Some folks say dis town would
be considerable bigger if in want on
account of so much land all roun' it
dat amt got no houses OH it," This
in perfect seriousness dense simpacity Y
no idea of joke. 81 reckon you
seed dat church as you come along up
street. Dat's an awful big church-aw-
f. igh steeple. An it's solid stone
e. jcs' de top part-de steeple,
means-dat's wood. 1t falls off wher
de win blows pooty hard, and one
time it stuck i'm cows back and bust
de COW all to dc mischief. It's gwin
to kill some body yit, dat steeple is. A
mana big man, he was-bigger wha
Bill is-he tuck it up dare aud fixed i
again-an' he didn'tlook no bigger'n :
boy, he was so high up. Dat steeple'
awful high. If you look out dc win
der you kin see it." looked out
and was speechless with awe and ad
miration-which gratified Jimmy be
yond expression. The wonderful
steeple was some sixty or sevent.
feet high, and had clOck-face on it.
"Y ou see dat arrer OH top o'dat steeple
Well, sab dat arrer is pooty nigh a
dis do [doorl. l seed it when de
} pulled it outen de COW. 1t mus b
. awful 10 STAN i'm dat steeple whe
de clock is strikin'-dey say it il
Booms and jars se's ou think th
I, worlds comm to an end. wouldn
like to be up dare wheu de clocks