The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1875-04-14
All. SORTS.

N.Y.
Party ties--those little white chokers
worn by blonde gentlemen who part
their hair in the middle.
"Is that cheese richY" asked Bloggs
of his grocer. EYES, was the candid
reply, "there's millions in it.
Rhode Island bristles with spelling
matches. Some of the dictionary
words reach clear acress the State.
Forty girls will run after snob
with gold-headed cane, where one
will shy up to fellow with sound
horse sense.
Michigan men don't feel as though
they had eloped If they don't leave
wife and four children in destitute
circumstances.
The man who is kind and polite to
his mother-in-law has reached Vicks.
burg, and is an object of general curl
osty to the people there.
VIM. Badger, station agent at Box
ford, Mass, has common glass chin
ney for the lamp which has been in
daily use since November II, 1868.
The local editor of fashion maga-
zine says "there is something very
pretty in ladies' gloves this season.
He evidently means the lady's hands,
1t is said nothing will cure q poets
affection for his idol sooner to catch
her at the dinner table excavating the
kernel of hickory nut with hair.
pin. &e
The greatest discovery at Pompeii is
that of woman making a FIRE in q
cook stove while her husband is in
bed and asleep. She was noble wo-
man.
A California preacher is preaching
on the best way to raise boys. We
have always found number IA boot
about as effective as anything for rails
ing them.
This is the season of the year when
the editor shouts up the pipe to the
foreman: "The article l sent up yes
terday headed Spring has Come you
can hold over" maat
London is ahead. 1t has more Jews
than Palestine, more Scotchmen than
Edinburg, more Irish than Dublin,
more Catholics than Rome, and more
thieves than Chicago.
An economical farmers daughter in
Massachusetts put of her wedding day
because eggs were up to forty cents a.
dozen, and it would take two dozen for
the wedding cakes and pudding.
An Indiana Sunday school man
writes to Bible firm in New York /:
"Send me on some Sunday school pa
psrs and books. Let the books be
about pirates and Indians as far as
possible"
A Green Bay man thinks it very
wrong for boy to 60 to circus, but
he will keep lad turning tanning
mill ten hours, hand him FIVE cents,
and stand and wait for the boy to
thank him.
When a common japanese goes in.
to the presence of an ofice-holder he
must say: "Great and distinguished
child of the sun, deign to put your
foot upon my neck" There's some
pleasure in holding an Office in that
country.
A paper in Southern Illinois regrets
that it went to press zone day too ear
ly to record the death of John Bates.
This is not quite as cool as the paper
which said: "Just as we are going to
press, John Smith is being run over by
the cars"
This is the season Of the year when
the farmer tells his son John, that il
he will sort over ten bushels of pota.
toes, feed the stock, repair the fence
and reshingle the corn-crib he may
have the rest of the day to go rabbit
hunting.
During trial the Judge called Q
witness. No one answered, and ar
elderly man arose and solemnly said
che is gone" "Where has he gone 2
asked the Judge, in no tender tone
81 don't know, but he is dead" wal
the guarded answer.
A man who was sentenced to b.
hung was visited by his wife, who said
"My dear, would YOU like the children
sto see you executed2" No." replied
he. "That's just like YOU" said she
"you never wanted the children t,
have any enjoyment"
An aged colored individual stepped
. into store on Woodward avenue, ,anC