The Van Buren press., 1875-03-02
SHAKESPEARE IN THE FAMILY.
The Trials Of a Young Tragedian.

"A few days ago, young Gurlcy, whose
father lives on Croghan street, organized
theatrical company and purchased the
dime novel play of " Hamlet" The CON
pany consisted OF three boys and host
Ter, and Mr.. Gurleys hired girl was to
be the ghost" il the troupe could
guarantee her fifty cents per night.
Yonng Gurley suddenly bloc cmed out
as a professional, and when his mother
asked him to bring in some wood, he re-
piled:
Though am pennilcss, thou canst
not degrade me"
You trot out after that wood, or I'll
have your father trouucc you" she cx-
claimed.
The tyrant who lays his hand upon
me shall die" replied the boy, but he
got the wood
He was out on the step when man
came along, and asked him where La.
layette street was.
"Doomed for a certain time to roam
the earth ~ replied Gurley in hoarsc
voice. and holding his right arm out
straight.
IL say--you! Where is Lafayette
street :" called the man.
"Ah could the dead but speak---all !"
continued Gurlcy,
The man drove him into the house, and
his mother sent him into the grocery after
potatoes.
II go, most noble duchess ~ he said i,
as he took up the b,sket, " but my good
sword shall some day avengc these in
sultsn
He knew that the grocer favored the
atricals. and when he got there be said
Art thou provided with store of
that vegetable known as the iatcr, most
excellent dukc,'
"What in thunder do you want ?" the
grocer growled as he cleaned the chesse-
knife on piece of paper.
Thy plcbian mind is duh of compre
hension !" answered Gurlcy.
Don't try to get of any Of your non
sense on me, or I'll crack your empty
pate in q minute !" roared the grocer and
Hamlet had to come down from his
high horse, and asked for a peek of po.
tatoes.
WHAT made YOU so long?" asked
his mother as he returned
Thy grave shall be dug In the cy-
press glade" he haughtily answered.
When his father came home at noon,
Mrs Gu.ley told MIN that she believed
the boy was going crazy, and related all
that had occurred.
a. see what als him. mused the faith
er, "this explains why he hangs around
johnson 5 barn SO much.
At the dinner. table young Gurlcy spoke
Of his father AS the " illustrous count !"
and when his mother asked him IL he
would have some butter gravy, he an.
swered:
The appetite Of a warrior cannot be
satisfied on such nonsense"
When the meal was over, the father
went out to his iavorite shade tree, cuta
sprout, and the boy was ordered to step
out into the woodshed, and see If the
penstock was frozen up. He found the
old man there, and he said:
"Why, most noble lord, | had suppos,
ed thee far away
I'm not SO far away but what I'm 60
ing to make you skip" growed the ia
ther. "lll teach you to fool around
with ten cent tragedies Come up herc!'
For about five minutes the woodshed
was full of dancing feet, flying arms, and
moving bodies. and then the old man
took a rest, and inquired;
There, your highncss, dost want any
more y
"Oh, no, dad--not a darncd Bit"
walled the young manager, end while the
father started for down town, he went Ia
aud sorrowfully Informed the hired girl
that he must cancel her engagement un
til the fall season.