Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1875-10-14
AN OBTUSE MAN.


She was a stylish young lady about eigh-
teen years old, and to accommodate friend
she took the baby out for an airing. She
was wheeling it up and down the walk when
an oldish man, very deaf, came along and in
quired for certain person supposed to live
on that street. She nearly yelled her head
off trying to answer him, and he looked
around, caught sight of the baby, and said
"Nice child, that. 1 suppose you feel
proud of him ?"
"It is't mine," she yelled at him.
"Boy, Ell? Well, he looks just like you" !"
at isn't mine! |" she yelled again; but he
NODDED his head and continued:
Twins, Ell? Where's the other one?"
She started off with the cab, but he follow
ed and asked:
"Did it die of collie ?"
Despairing of making him understand by
word of mouth, she pointed to the baby, at
herself, and then shook her head.
"Yes-yes, I see-t' t'other twin in the house.
Their father is fond of them, of course?"
She turned the cab and hurried the other
way, but he followed and asked:
"Do they kick around much nights p
II tell you 'tain't mine % she shouted, very
red in the face.
81 think you're wrong there" he answered.
"Children brought up on the bottle are apt
to pine and die"
She started on run for the gate, but be-
fore she had opened it he came up and asked a:
"Have to spank 'em once in while, 1sup'
pose?"
She made about twenty gestures in half a
minute, and he helped the cab through the
gate and said:
"Our children were all twins, and I'll send
my wife down to give you some advice. You
see"
But she picked up fower-pot and flung it
at him. He jumped back, and as she enter
ed the house he called out:
Hope insanity won't break on the twins
EXPERIENCE VS.. CAPITAL-The editor of
the drawer" in Harper's Magazine, was chat
ting few weeks ago on the piazza of the Uni
ted States Hotel, at Saratoga, with a bright
German gentleman, retired from business, who
relates the following little anecdote:
Coming down to New York the other
night on the boat" said he, 81 got chatting
with German acquaintance, and asked
MIN Wnat ne was QOlnS.
"'Vell,' he replied, shoost now am do
ing nodings, but have made arrangements
to 60 in to pizness.'
"'Glad to hear it. What are you going
into?'
"Vell, goes into partnership nit man.
"'Do you put in much capital ?
"'No; I doesn't put in no gsbital.'
"'Don't want to risk it, eh?
"'No; but puts in de experience
"'And be puts in the capital? 2
"'Yes, dotis it. We goes into pizness for
dree years : he puts in de gabital, 1 puts in
de experience At de end of de dree year
will have de gabital, and he will have de ex-
perience?"
P1N-BAcK.-She was an elderly lady, and
as she seated herself on one of the stools in
dry.goods store and asked to be shown some
"caliker," she remarked that when she was a
"ga" she thought she was powerful lucky if
she got sixteen yards in dress, and she
thoug hit it a SINFUL" waste of stuff to put in
more; but she had just "heern" that Mrs. x.
was agon' to hev forty.two yards in her new
calker, and she hoped that there might be a
cloud burst in seventeen minutes if that air
woman should stare round at her in church
and make remarks about her clothes "You
kin list cut me off forty-three yards, and I'll
have it made pin-pack fashion, with an over
dress and a square mainsail, and fyin' jib,
and back-action; then I'd jist like to see
that stuck-up Mrs x. put on airs over me"
WHY HE Cor IT.-When resident ofDe-
troit saw lawn-mower at the gaze of an &C.
ouaintance who hasn't got six spears of grass
around his house, and who doesn't own the
house any way, he inquired in tone of sur
prise: o,
"Why, what do you want of lawn.mower?"
"Well, 1 don't exactly need it," was the
reply, "but the children can haul it around,
and the man offered to trust me for it"
sgA Western editor, thinking to stock his
depleted larder, advertised, Poultry taken in
exchange for advertising" The villainous
compositor, seeing his opportunity to pay up
long. standing grudge, set it up, "Poetry ta-
ken in exchange for advertising;" and since
that time the office boy has been clearing fifty
cents day from the waste.Paper man.
HARD T1MEs.-People often complain OF
hard times from mere natural tendency to
growl, but Rome (Ga.) darkey, the other
dow cold "Nehher seed sich times since been