The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1875-03-12
SAYINGS AND DOINGS.
MARCH.

1
just where they stopped years before.
March! March! March1 They are slipping
Into their places at last
Little white lily buds dripping
Under the showers that fad fast;
Buttercups, violets, roses!
Snowdrop and bluebell and pink,
Throng upon throng of posies,
Bending the dewdrops to drink.
March! March March! They viii hurry
| Forth at the wild bugle-sound
Blossoms and birds in furry,
Fluttering all over the ground.
Hang out your flags, birch and willow
| Shake out your red tassels, larch!
| Grass-blades, up from your earth-pillow!
Hear who is calling you-Marehl
A Missouri woman who applied for
q situation as car driver, being asked il
she could manage mules, scornfully re-
piled: "Of course can, I've had two
husbands
"GooD many children !" echoed q
Missouri farmer as a traveller counted
up fourteen; ct Just wish you'd come
up to the graveyard with me !"
"MY lecture" said California or
ator, will be brief" A turnip hit
him on the "divide" at that instant,
and he announced: "The meeting
stands adjourned |"
We are still long way from the
millennium. A witness in an Ohio court
has just sworn that he "never knew 9
miller on the canal who wouldn't steal
water whenever he got ia chance"
CoRsETs have been the destruction of
art. There are no good models now-a-
days, says the sculptors. When Powers
made his Greek Slave he worked it out
of sixteen different models, and then he
had to go back to the antique for his
bust.
CARLYLE, Ruskin, Tennyson, Brown
ing and some other distinguished Eng
lishmen are reported TO have signed
memorial protesting against the horri-
BILE cruelties too often perpetrated un-
der the pretext of scientific vivisection'
DoN'T tell us any more about the
good women of old. An observer who
wrote hundreds of years ago said
s Woman is necessary evil, q natural
temptation, desirable calamity, q do
mestic peril. deadly fascination and
painted Ill. !"
ST SIZE very little of you,' said an
old gentleman at Louisville bali to q
Young lady whom he had not met In
long time before. st know it, was
the artless reply, "but mother wouldn't
allow me to wear very loW-neck dress
tonight, the weather is SO cold"
A GOOD joke is told of resident of
r. T., who, failing to get
his usual supply Of water, concluded
The pipe was frozen, and spent nearly
n day In endeavors to thaw it out. His
feelings may be better imagined than
described when he found that the water
had been shut off for non-payment OF
water rent.
SEVENTEEN years ago q Louisville
woman was told by clairvoyant that
she was destined to marry an auburn
haired young man with blue eyes and
heavy nnoustache that he would soon
he rich. and that they should have two
children-a boy and girl. She dld
marry the auburn-haiTed man. Ihey
have five children now, the auburn hair
has disappeared from the husbands
head, and he is getting fifteen dollars
week.
THE statement is made in an Interest,"
inc article in the Trade Journal that
within the past forty years the gross
WEIGHT of cast iron ARTICLES produced
IN America has been diminished fully
Dne-half. Half a century ago the lion
frame of, q Washington printing press
weighed nearly 1000 pounds, and ai-
though it was an arch OF metal n1he
inches wide by three inches thick, 30
poor was It's quality that 1T was often
broken by the pull OF one pressmans
arm. The present smooth light cast
NOS show an actual elasticity under
strain approaching the service OF
iron.
IA SCHOOL teacher in Umatilla county,
California. had pretty girl OF sixteen
IS a pupil. She entangled his heart,
and then cruelty tilted him. ThereupR
he sought revenge. Catching her IN q
,Iioht infraction of the rules, he swung
his birch branch aloft, and commanded
her to stand up and be whipped. She
ran ont of the door and like a deer
across the fields toward home; but her
fieetness was OF short duration, and the
angry schoolmaster's hand soon grasped
her arm. Her courage had gone with
her wind, and she offered then and
there to kiss and make upi he wouldn't
whip her. He declined to compromise,
led her back to the school-honse, ana
flogged her until blood came through
ma back of her dress. Her hour OF
exultation came when sh 3 saw him lined
$50 for assault.
A FARMER called at the house of q
LAWYER to consult him professionally.
q Is T. Saucer at home?" he inquired
Of the lawyers wife. He was answered
negatively, After q moments hsslta-
ion a thought relieved him. " Mebby
Yourself can gi' mo information as well
a Z Saucer, as ye're his wife. The
kind lady promised to do 90 i she
Found IL In her power, and the other
as follows: "Spoaze ye
were an old white mare, an l should
borry We to gWang to mill with grlst on
YER back. an we should get no farder
than Stair Hill, when all at once ye
should back up, and rear up, and pitch
up. and kneel down backward. and
break yer darned old neck, who'd pay
for We Z Not I--darn me il ! would
The lady smilingly told him, as she
closed the door, that as he had himself
settled the case, advice would be super
fiuos.
GREECE ID about the size of Vermont.
Palestine is fourth the size of New
York. Hindoostan is more than nun
ared times as large as Palestine. The
Great Desert of Africa has nearly the
present dimensions Of the United
States. The Red Sea would reach from
washington to Colorado, and it is three
times as wide as Lake Ontario. The