The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1875-02-19
NUMBER 8.
GENERAL ITEMS.


is the pl &c goF ]. boil
1t Is enough for one thing at a time tc
happen, especially twins,
Love without money is something like
patent leather boots without soles.
A Minnesota girl has causel her father
to be arrested and 1ned Si2.2e lv- sp2akins
her.
Why was Ruth very rude to Boaz? Be
cause she pulled has ears and troll on his
corn.
A disgusted Nil vaul-ee fisherman offers
a chrome 70 every fish which VIII take ths
bait
A good-natured man viii pat up with
most saythi1 short OF lining his wig with
a mustard plaster.
Henry Clay describes a mule as "an ami
NAL That has no pride Of ancest Y and no
hope Of posterity.'
St. Louis has ten thousand dogs. The
native wears 4 section of stcve-pipe on each
leg during the mad-iog season.
"I'he one thing neeiful for the perfect
enjoyment OF love is conf lcnce." Slms
with hash and sausage.
why DO you cal your doy Ok asked
Smith of Jones. ''B cause he has such =
coarse bark replied Mr. J.
New Lonlon man recently bought a
dog with money that had been given him
to relieve the wants OF his family.
"Digbv viii you t,ke some IF this but
ter?' Thank you ml IN. L belong to the
Temperance society Cln't take anything
strong"
"Ah. parson. wish 1 could carry my
gol3 with me- said dying man to his
I -
aaEwc-.
"Bidjy, did you put an egg in the coffee
to settle 1t - Yes. mum; L put in four
They were so bad L had to use the NOR os
them
''C-c-c-ctn that p-p-p-parrot talk asked
a stutteriny man of a q grnan- Ven he
don't Tx SO gooter as you, schop, by tan,
his head OF"
"Sekrstz," says Josh Billings 'is bad
investment-if You pass II, you loze the
principal; and if You keep it, yoa loze the
interest"
"Who was the rneskeet man?" asked a
SundAy-school teach-r. "-Ioses.'' Very
well; who VS. TIC ileok.55 uo---l:'' '-ley-
81 WIS any"
An Ensoph;stoc1ted person once declined
plate OF macaroni soup with the remark
that they conl li't . .l-n OF any bilel pipe
stems on him
A young fellow IN Gruu.ly county. Iowa,
wanted 30 charge las girl twenty cents for
his picture, informing her at the tine that
II originally cost a Carter
"Am not a little p u l. - inquire LADY.
who WIS short and corpulent, of a crusty
old bachelor. You look more Ike Il big
tub was the blunt re ly.
\ Western editor asserts t,lat it is M
use trying t. publish nonpar-il newspa-
per Ia long primer cOnmun tv, which
XIII be re1dI's uai@rsyool ~ tie in.ti ted
4 circuit rrelehcr an Missouri prlyei for
ruin on night AZ a flr asr's hpuss. aal the
farmer. who had horse race arr.a gel for
next dAy, was SO mad thIt he turned tie
good MAJ cut OF doors
''NYhat do you know Of the ch r lctar Of
this man 2" was asked ef 4 wIta-Ss at p5-
Ece-couct tha other dav. '.Wait DO I
knog Oh ks eharact !: | know It T. b..
unJl lachl5le, your Ones he rerl.e1 with
much emYhI hIs-s.
4 disrespectfu' son askel his father.
why is neighbor s hitl's liquor store like
a counterfeit dcliarY'' Il can't tell nv
o'-A- 1Dt-attAS- WI IN f'-too H. ia
the boy. That boy got "a letther melal "a
the 81 ape of I number ten Loot.
when the cold winl blows, take care of
your nose that it DOESN'T get froze. AID
wr.p II, your toes in var3n wooden hos -
The above, we suppose. : written IN prose
b. some one who knows the e1se,s # cold
SHOWS.
Detroit man who WIS net used 10 ths
work "a ieztook t. i .ughter a hog the Oth-
er day Ia the strug sle "A knife disip-
pelrel, and, Incredible as 1T appears. it
was aft>srwlrd discovered that the hog
had actually sw.llo .se1 i, h--le u21
blale.
An Inliana fIruer. need:nr p,c'lage Of
screws, writes t. his Ia .rca lat III town
"Deer Sir-ple1e eea3 by the bearer
(won) pIxig OF Skr CHS. mejua size, al
Sow a soheep S,srolgh dryver, an abl1s-e.
etc As the chef engineer OF spelling
school that fa.sIer woali be heard from
Story Is t5ld OF IN old gentleman. who
always took notes Of the minister's sermons
and on one occ lsioa rad them 70 tle min
lister himself. stop. stopi' said the latter
on the occurrence OF d certain sentence. II
didn't say II It Il know yoa III mt
was the reply; = put tAlt il myself to
make sense.
4 young man in williams College hav-
In : been seen IN Z rather intoxic ted state
several times. was told by the colleg. au-
thorities tn It if found again IN 4 similar
condition he would be expelled one
dly, having taken drop too nuch. he net
the President, who in,i -sn,ntly said
Drunk aga;n:'' "Shoo am T. was the
reply.
youn , l,iy in store in Ter-l Hanto.
Ind. C.iristlnas Z e. was looking at a ln,l-
slc-box that had just celsei playing
Wishing 10 hear II again. she attempted u
st .rt Il, but without success On, pshaN,
she said, 1t won't 20 for uls.' One oi the
pl,opE.ieto-s oyerhe2EinG the remark, step
ped up ana said: Il wish Wa & TDas-c-
boN-fi So fCr YOU
IS a Policeman pissed upon his he2t IN
L =. 4 -. -