The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1875-11-27

lydia Thompson is sick and growing sckcr
She is literally wasting away And now some
muse awakes and sings
Shall we never see those little feet
A kicking any more?
Shall VIC never see them whirl around
And skip about the floor?
Oh, arc we going to lose the sight
or all we've seen before?
Oh, why should she climb the golden stair?
He has been found at last-the mythical man
who is SO mean that he will steal money from
the eyes Of corpse His name is Robert Rowe,
he lives at Muncie Ind, and he is in Jail await
ing trial for stealing the sum Of 70 cents in sill
yer coin from the eyes of the dead body of Allen
Darbashire, with which he was sitting up.
An Indiana country paper recently gave a
thrilling account of a suicide in which the edi-
tor wrote how the unhappy man plunged the
knife into his vitas" And the intelligent com
positor rose up and spelled vitals with two t.,
and the sound of the shotgun has not gone out
of the land since the paper came out.
Pure Havana cigars will be scarcer this year,
owing to a failure in the Massachusetts, tobacco
crop
The Rochester Democrat says the few persons
who do not know that kerosene is explosive arc
rapidly dying off.
"Ml is vanity and vexation of spirit saith
the Whisky Ring.
Postmaster Pcase, of Vcksburg, Miss, has been
removed II will be remembered that he adj
yised Attorney General Perrcpont that Amcs
had exaggerated the condition Of affairs IN Mis-.
eissippi and that there was no need Of feder0l
troops Grant said, "Let us haye-no more
Peasc."
We don know how manv daily papers Rev. DR..
Lorrmcr takes, but he stated in recent lecture:
4" If there is any one thing for which the human
race is pre.emnent it is for profound and solid
lying"
In his farewell discourse at Brooklyn Moody
made the singular complaint that while his
meetings had been well attended by the
christian people OF that town, his specials for
sinners had not been 50 well patronzed. 1t new
er occurred to him that sinners were rather
scarce in Brooklyn,
4 rogue at Sacramento has been emncntly
successful in passing for member Of the legis.
lature. Ke kept up the character by borrowing
money, not paying his hotel bill, treating every.
body, and getting free pass East to attend the
Centennial.
The city OF Philadelphia owes $74,000,C0O Of
which S24 100000 has been contracted under the
republican rule of the last four years..
This shows what radical oflice-hodcrs can do
If they nerve themselves up to their work. Few
southern carpet-bag governors ever beat that.
Problem in optcs-Can cross-eycd man be
HaturaLeyzed?-BoSt Post
Cedar Rapids boasts that it has but 30 saloons
the other 81 houses are occupied by the sa-
looms customers.
Unnamed by the loss of husband" is the
latest style Of indicating widows grief
At the Georgia state fair the prcttiest baby
was awarded cooking stove. The real danger
of giving a stove to Il baby is that some day
when his mother Il ont he may pui IL in his
mouth, and then he would have to swallow tea.
kettle before she could get supper.--N y Uc,-
did.
Miss F.. z. Newman wants to preach for the
COngregationalsts in the Elgin IN y association
district Her application was disposed Of by
granting her liberty to preach, but not to take
upon herself full PASTORAL relations.
Sensible provso. Full PASTORAL relations ="
are generally understood to include mother.in.
and nine children.
Tn Wilmington Aduocdte says Gardner girl
has caused her father to be fined Sl2 20 for spank
ing her. Served him right; that's no way TO
make girl smart
John Logan says he neer, so help him, had
anything 10 do with distileries, and is 10000 OF
50 poorer, to-day, than when he entered the sen.
ate Why, Johnl Such a good player as you
used to be, too.-SpriHQfetd Republican.
Weston IN his walking matches has got as fan
~ Chicago, but he'd better keep away from Wis
IL. Zen find Mantowoc against him in that
'iate.--NcC York Commercial That's so-Meno
~, lizh-toned Waukaus, and Rlpon good
s. who link nothing OF giving the Prairie in
80, and skipping ii over the hills. If he should
sa there however, he'd better put Big Patch
over his heart, for they're apt 90 Kickapoo walk
80 ut Of The State. Metoman Just now who says
h-IHrer- Occan. But he carries a Bad Axe and
thinrawa through the state Mauston any
juneau.
Mr-. Woodruff has administered unto Colonel
ood what may be denominated the unclean
rsSe. Size as cast him of Bad Blood She
wouldn't dry her hands on him now"
he Rev. SIR. Hicks says that he is still taken
~ be bosom ~ the best families. At this rate
30 parsou never will DC weaned.-SaUaEdh 1elrs
=. good ord gifted Chids attributes the fe.
...fiiy Of IL obituary inuse 20 the fact Of his
''rg rs potatoes cooked with the tops on
+. Il .. hfsis.
The students of DE- Yeaux College have start
81 paper called The Whirlpool ]; must he well
raadyted.- Commercial advertiser And De yeaux-
.. scitJss, tOo, ch s-lsgsigH Post IL ought TO
ave good circuiaration.-Fre Press. It's arti-
- g. ss.., ;ss{o he r.Gsds-- Eaters naal But
suD~efjb~r- run the risk OF being sucked In.