Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1875-07-08
iirGYIties ana ECyi!LeS.

sSg A bad siSn--To sign another mans
name 10 note.
5azs- A woman in Dawson, Ga, acci-
dcntally bit her tongue of The other
day, and since that, her husband gets
home every evening two hours earlier
than usual.
rs Johnny, what are you doing,
my SOM" ooh ! nothing, only trying
10 hit Frank on the fingers with thc
hatchnt.'
ca Said Pat: Faix, where wud ye
find modern house that has lasted so
long rs the ancicnL?'
rs" \ Minnesota Judge, in pronounc-
inc the death sentence, tenderly ohsery-
od of guilty, you richly deserve the
fate that awaits you; il Innocent. il Will
DC qualification for YOU To feel That You
were hanged without such Il crime on
your Conscience; in either cisa you will
BIO delivered from Il world Of care"
:a1- Monkeys never grow older in OK
preston. a young monkey looks exact
ly like his grandpa melted up and born
over again.
gasasr. Texas would have been Il splcn-
did place for Micawber. When he sat
down, waiting for something 10 turn up,
the playful nibblc Of a tarantuIa would
have turned up what he sat down in a
very lively manner.
60 Tie charge that Botliin, Of the
Milwaukee Sentinel, has to pull OH his
undcrshirt from below cn account Of the
size Of his ears, is base invention
We've known Bot, over twenty one
years, have slept with him q great many
times, and VIC know that his ears art
flexible. In cold weather we used to
use the off ono f5r an extra Iuilt-Cincii,-
nati Times.
sey-. A cynic observed: "If there is
anything that will reconcile man to
married life, it is the knowledge that
stc,;.:c 1vcr him like n dream as he bursts
Il .!.ah of IoN;s,:rs that til orc is one
a. home who ca. a. damage"
aEr les mighty mean trick for Il
New Yorker to get ncwiy-arrived
Swcdc to turn an ice-cream freezer for
an hour under tl:eimpression that there's
music in it.
gcf'- 81 feel set back year in my re-
liSion every time I meet him." was the
remark of pious Milwaukee widow
when speaking of handsome young
fellow who lived in the neighborhood.
@s1t- A kind hearted gentleman in Mil
waukoe recently gave an INDECENT family
So, and the same evening he met them
all returning from circus on exhibition
in the town, when the head Of the family
had the imrudcnce to ask him for money
to buy something for breakfast.
~ A Detroit citizen VINO met an old
acquaintance zreeL asked why he
wore weed o hat. "For my poor
wife, who has passed over the river"
was the melancholy reply. "Wcll, can't
she come bacl,-aren't the ferry boats
r,nning?" was the surprised query. The
man had to explain.
G,s'' "Thore is but one good wife in the
country, and every man thinks that he
has her." Old Brown, who is bald, and
whose wife has red hair and Il wicked
eye, read this, and murmurcd, as he
passed his hand mcditatively over his
head: 81 dunno! dunno!'
:sass- Yes, sir" yelled preacher in
Dakota church, ono Sunday morning,
"thero's more lying, and swearing, and
stealing, aud general deviltry to tho
square inch in this here town than all
the rest Of tho American country" and
then the congregation got mp and dump
ed tho preacher out Of the window.
e9f-"M Ma will Pa go to Heaven?"
(" Yes, my daughter, / reckon so; but
why do you ask such a question:" BE
cause l thought he couldn't leave his
stare"