The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1875-10-29
How Tommy Went to Church.

How Tommy Went to Church.
1t was Sunday morning, but there
was an unbeard-of connection i'll the
usually well-ordered household of the
Dobbses, for dreadful thing had hap
pened. Cinthy Ann had lost her hair
that lovely hair for which, the day be-
fore, she had given her whole quarterly
allowance of $50. And nowit was gone.
She wrung her hands in despair; of
course she could not go to church-no-
body ever went to church without hair
There was a council held in the hall,
and it was decided that burglars had
been in the house, and it would be wise
to consult the police. They would
therefore send Thomas (who was
dressed for church i'll his new trousers)
in quest of an officer; but he was not
"around, which was strange, as it was
his practice to be around when any
thing of an exciting nature was trans.
piring; so, naturally, they began to
fear that he, too, had been a victim.
Jane had dressed him up beautifully
and seated him in the great new arm
chair, as straight and uncomfortable as
bran new pin, in bran new PIN
cushion /; but he was certainly not there
now, and it remained an open question
whether he had walked off of his own
accord, or had been picked off for his
peculiar straightness, and cleanness,
and newness. Just at this exciting
crisis there was heard in the region OF
the nursery decided "squeak squeak
squeak !"
Then up rose the Dobbs family, in
i. T., M
Brown, the cat, and the three small b. s,
and repaired to the nursery, where 10 !!
mounted upon his careering steed, sat
the young Sir Thomas, while floating
out upon the breeze was Cinthy AIMS
magnificent tresses, ingloriously tied to
the wooden stump which once mad held
tail
There was general uproar and con-
fusion, and in the midst of it all, the as
piring youth was carried away captive,
and soon, to his deep modification, he
found himself shorn of his manly habil-
iments, and robed in the despised dresses
of his infancy for you must know that
when the first beloved pants came
dresses were the rule, and the lovely
trousers the rare exception, worn only
on state occasions.
Then by and 10y he was hired to be a
good little girl for whole day, that he
might be boy i'll the evening. Then,
finally, the trousers grew to be rule,
and the dresses the exception, which
dresses were kept until such time as he
should be bad.
Well, he was left all alone in his dis
grace with Jane, while all the rest went
off to church but Jane was not enter
tanning. She read story book and left
him to his own devices, 80 he slipped out
into the garden, but he didn't care fig
for the plnks and peoples that day.
Presently he discovered that by some
unaccountable mistake the door of the
tool room had been left open. He went
in. There hung his fathers garden
clothes, and a roug h-and-ready hat, two
feet broad. He put the hat on his head,
then stepped into the boots, put himself
into the vest, and buttoned it all the way
ND. which eifectually covered the obnox.
ious dress, all but the sleeves. He then
sat down to mediate, with the boots
living straight out before him. be
thought of the church and the great or
gan, and was suddenly filled with an I'm
speakable longing to go and hear the big
music.
Had you been in the streets of IA GER
tain town Oh that Sunday morning, you
might have seen the phenomenon oil {
hat and boots slowly vending their way
no to the church door and had yor
looked closely, you might have seen two
small hands cLnglng to strap OF either
boot. and alternately lifting, to aid the
feet that might be supposed to occupy
the inside.
Church was nearly out and the Dobbs
es were calmly sitting in their pew, III
unconscious of what awaited them
Presently there was "a strange "clump
Chimp clump !" In the aisle. A low
litter swept through the congregation
Everybody looked around except thu
Dobbses. who were well-bred people
and knew better. The gray-haired min
ister looked up and forgot to preach, TO
there. standing at the entrance OF tin
Dobbses pew, was an animated pair o
boots with hat on top. Mrs. Dobbs tool
her ewes from the lace of the ministe
and rested them for u moment on thu
strange object, and then grew pale. Mr.
Dobbs looked sharply through his eye
Glasses. and said "Juptier !" louC
enough for the minister to hear. Thei
ont from under the hat there came
voice:
81 coined for to hear dc big moosic
IA. and 1 won't nebber take Cinth,
AIMS hair for my horses tail again
ne5ber J"
Cinthy Ann grew purple in the face
The pale mustache Of Dobbs, Jr.