The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1875-01-14
A NEW PILGRIM, S PROGRESS.

162l-Aeeps IhanKSglVlng-ln no uanSer OF
ever eating.
1622-Buids Meeting House.
1623-Proclaims Fast Day.
1628-Cnts down May Pole at Merry Mount,
as rebuke to vain recreations
1635-Is crowded for accommodations, and
stakes out new farm at Connecticut
1637-Makes war on the Antinomians, and the
Pequot Indians, and whips both.
1698-Starts College.
1640-Sets up Printing Press.
1643-Goes into Confederacy-The first Co.
lonial Congress.
1648-Lays down the Cambridge Platform
Hangs Witch.
1649-Sets his face against the unchristian
custom of wearing long hair, a thing un-
civil and uncomely."
1651-Is rebuked for . intolerable excess and
bravery of apparel, and is forbidden to
wear gold and silver lace, or other such gew-
gaws.
1652-Coins Pine Tree Shillings-and makes
the business profitable.
1663-Prints Bible for the Indians.
1680-Buys a hang-up" Clock and OCCASION
ally carries a silver watch that helps him
guess the time of day About this period
learns to use Forks. at table new fashion.
1692-Is scared by Witches again, at Salem ):
but gets the better of them.
17O2-Founds another College, which, at last
settles down at New Haven.
Footprints his first Newspaper. in Boston.
17O5-Tastes Coffee as luxury, and at his own
table.
1908 Constructs another P1atform-this time
at Saybrook.
1710-Begins to sip Tea-very sparingly
1711-Puts q letter in his first POStofice.
1720-Eats a Potato, and takes one home to
plant in his garden as a curiosity.
1721-Is Enoculdted for the Small Pox-not
without grave remonstrance from his con-
sentative neighbors. Begins to tS5nq bu
note on Sundays, thereby encountering
much opposition and opening ten-years
quarrel.
Observation-Disclosures timed ware and starts
the first Tin PeddL'r on his travels.
1742-Sees Faneuil Hall built. The cradle of
Liberty is ready to be rocked.
1745-Builds an organ; but does not permit it
to be p layed in the Meeting House.
1750-Buys bushel of Potatoes for Winters
use-al his friends wondering what he will
DO with so many.
1755-Puts up Franklin StoUe in the best
room and tries one of the newly invented
lightning Rods.
1760-AbOut this time begins to wear collar
TO his shirt. When he can afford it, takes
his wife to meeting in hdise instead of
on pillion, heretofore.
l765-Shows his dislike to stamped Paper,
and joins the ''Sons of Liberty"
176S-Tries his hand at Type Foundinq-no
yet successfully-in Connecticut. +
177O-Buys homemade Wooden Clock.
1773-Waters his Tea in Boston harbor
Plants LIBERTY Trees, wherever he finds
good soil.
1774-Lights Boston streets with oil Lamps:
a novelty (though 6 New Lights ~ have been
plenty for some years).
I776-BrOttef' JOndttGn-as he begins to be
called in the family-d9clares himself Free
and Indepen dent.
1780-Buys 6 Umbrillo. for Sundays; and
whenever he shows it is laughed at for his
effeminacY.
1791-Starts Cotton Spinning factory.
1792-Has been raising Silk Worms, in Con-
necticut; and now gives his minister (not
his wlfe) homemade silk gown. Buys
Carpet, for the middle of the parlor floor
1793-Invents the Cotton Gin, and thereby
trAbles the value of Southern plantations
1795-l8OO-Wears P0ntGloons occasional ly,
but not when in full dress Begins to u sc
Plates on the breakfast and tea-table.
18O2-Has the boys and girls 0dccindted.
18O6-Trys to burn piece of Hard Coal from
Philadelphia. A failure.
18O7-Sees boat go by Steam, on the Hud-
son.
1815-Holds a little Convention al Hartford.
but doesn't propose to dissolve the Union.
Buys one of Terry's patent " Shelf Clocks"
for $780, and regulates his watch by it.
1817-Sets up Stove in the Nee ting House.
and builds fire in it for Sunday an inno-
walton which is stoutly resisted by many.
18I7-Begins to run q Steamboat on Long
Island Sound, and-after making his will
takes passage on it to New York.
10l9-Grown holder, he crosses the Atlantic
in steamship.
1822-Lights Gas in Boston. At last, learns
how to make Hard Coal burn, and sets
CRATE in his parlor. Bays Steel Pen Gone
OF Gillott's, sold at 1913 per eross). Has
his everyday Shirts made without Rutf1es.
1o25-About this time puts Percussion Lock
on his old musket.
1826-Buys his wife pair of queer-shaped
India Rubber overshoes. Puts on his first
False Collar.
1828-Tastes his first T0n1dto-doubtingly
Is told that it is questionable to feed him
self with his knife-and buys silver forks,
for great occasions.
1832-Builds a Railroad. and rides on it,
1833-Rubs the first Friction Mutch-then
called $ Lucifer" and afterwards 'Loco
Fooo." Throws away the old finder Box,
with it's flint and steel.
1835-Invents tire Revolver, and sets about
supplying the world with it as a peace
maker. Tries a Gold Pen but cannot
lind good one yet, nor till 1914.
l037-Gets in Panic-and out again, after
free use of " shln-plasters"
1838-Adopts the new fashion of putting his
letter IN Envelopes !; Ca fashion which does
not fairly prevail till seven years later).
I840-Sits for his Daguerrotype, and gets
fearfully and wonderfully made picture
Begins to burn himself up with "Cam-
phene and Burning Fluid % and con-
tinues the process for years, with change of
names of the active agen ts, down to and in
Guiding "Non-Explosive Kerosene"
1844-Sends his first message by the Electric
Telegraph.
l847-Buys his wife Seeming machine !; in the
vain hope that somehow it will keep the
buttons on his shirts.-Begins to receive
advices from the esprit World"
o55-Beglns to bore and be bored by the
Hoosac Tunnel.
1858-Celebrates the laying of the Ocean Ca
ole, and sends friendly message to John
Bull. Next week begins to doubt whether
the Cable has been laid at ALL
1861-Goes South to help compose family
quarrel. Takes to using Paper Money.
1861-1865-Climbs the Hill Difficulty relieved
of his Pack after Jan. /, 1864 but loses