The Grange advance. [volume] (Red Wing, Minn.) 1873-1877, 1875-03-23
Young John Dooley,

1 .
He is dead. He died the other day,
and there were fourteen hacks at the flu
neral and many persons were truly
srleved' although the young mans many
good qualities were not generally known.
lie assisted his father in an office on one
OF the avenues but even his father didn't
know how we'll he has assisted, for he
was gone much O. the time, leaving John
IN sole charge. After little preparation
the young man was ready to receive cali
ers. When book agent dropped in to
ask him to subscribe for the last
thing out John arose, made a
polite bow and asked him to be
seated for just one moment. The book
agent would drop into the big arm chair
waiting at the corner of the table, but he
would rise up like green bay tree, and a
good deal quicker. Five or six eight:
ounce tacks were ingcniously arranged in
a group on the bottom Of the chair, and
after getting up and drawing them with a
claw hammer, which was always lying in
sight, the agent wouldn't feel like going
on and explaining how his book was out
selling every other book. He always
went down stairs without saying another
word about his book, and young John
would follow along and bow to him and
say that the Office boy was deserving of
death for playing such tricks on stran.
gers.
Then he had a mild way with agents
who were canrassing for advertisements
for weekly sheets. lie would say to
them:
"Certainly, We want to advertise. We
think your paper is the best advertising
medium in Detroit. Call in at noon.'
The agent would call and find the door
locked, and young John at dinner, and he
would loaf around and lose whole hour,
only to be told to come at five, when John
would be at supper. Finally, when the
agent began to grow tired, he would be
told that advertising didn't seem to be
what 1t was few years ago, and that if
they concluded to advertise they would
send it down. lie would be asked to
have cigar, and while he was smoking
away on the street the fire would find
powder and the agents eyes would get a
dose sufficient to keep him laid up for a
week.
Young John knew the step of those
men who 60 around canyassing for money
for the heather, and when he heard one
coming up stairs he hurriedly arranged a
string running down from the top of the
door, lodged into another room, and
when the canvasser for the heather
opened the door pail Of water fell upon
him, knocking off his hat and wetting
him down like fall from the wharf.
When he heard the pail fall John would
jump out and be greatly surprised and
:ympathize deeply and agree to have the
''office boy arrested within an hour.
The canvasscrs always slid down stairs
without asking him for money, and the
pail was arranged for another victim.
And young John would be attacked
with collie when the life insurance man
came in, and the way he would roll up his
eyes and glare at him would cause him to
back down stairs. " And he had way to
discourage the boy with the hat-rack, the
man with the g'ass-cutter and the woman
with pcn-wipers, and it got SO at last that
no one ever came up those stairs unless
he was full Of the most earnest kind of
business.
Poor young John! His like VIC may
never look upon again.-Detroit Press.