The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1875-05-14
SELECT STORY.
COMEDY.
BY EVA EVERGREEN.

nual Visit 10 neT hePhe"5 AeSaioeu hAAh
with scornful commiseration through
her glasses.
81 knew Itv fumed Jeremiah; ''if
they'd ask me now! But its's awful
to"
eff YOU amt numbskullv' Interrupt
ted Aunt Sally. you'll have to die
single, then; for a man who amt got the
spunk to do his own sparkin' amt wuth
wastin' time on. ! declare if was
some'at younger, sooner'n see you go on
in this shifless way I'd marry yom my
self"
"Couldn't you, anyhow" groaned her
hopeful nephew.
Anyhow repeated the lady. "You
might as we'll ask your grandmother.
I'd look pretty marryin' the fellow I've
many a time held over my knee as boy.
/ hoped to have 'hickoried' some sense
into you" and she left the room ere he
could prevent it, leaving our hero in
state of perplexed perturbation, which
ended, however, in a resolve to redeem
his character and sally forth in search Of
a wife
Across the street, in a neat cottage,
lived three sisters of less than thirty
years, and many longing glances had
been sent through its closed parlor
blinds toward his dwelling; many times
his passing figure had set their hearts
wildly futtering, only to sink in disap-
pointed vexation as he failed to come in,
and at this cottage Jeremiah resolved TO
make his first matrimonial venture.
We will pass over the preparations in
cident to this momentous errand without
comment. The attendant financial dam
ages were the complete Generalization
of half dozen silk ties and three cam
br1c handkerchiefs, of which he anointed
one with hair oil and deluged another
with liquid backing before recovering
his senses sufficiently to render the third
redolent of the at love you," as a deli
cafe Interpretation of his sentiments; so
that it was in no enviable state of mind
that he brought up at last on the Misses
Simpsons doorstep and knocked for ad-
mittance. The door was opened prompt
ly by a slip-shod damsel of fourteen,
who stood pushing disordered crop of
hair out of her eyes.
"Is-is-Miss Simpson IMP" stammer-
ed jeremiah.
The child gave her head an affirma
tive plunge, and was Immediately ex-
linguished by the precipitated shock of
hair.
"One on 'em isl" she replied senten-
tiously.
"Can / see her, if-if-she is not en-
gaged?"
"She hain't doin' nothin'; come inn
Our hero was ushered into darken
ed parlor, and banging the door shutshe
left him TO grope his way to a chair.
Presently footsteps were heard; Jere-
miah's heart began an obstreperous
humping, and had there been an open
door or window handy, to his eternal
disgrace be it spoken, he would have
embraced the mode of escape. But
there was something vastly better to be
embraced, and in another moment Miss
Simpson stood before him.
$50 delighted to see you, Mr.. Sykes!
Isn't it lovely day?"
"Yes, yes!' stammered Jeremiah; ''so
pleasant'I thought I'd come-and-"
eyes, Mr.. Sykes" prompted his host
ess, as our hero appeared to be falling
into state of hopeless imbecility.
az thought I'd come to-to-it's>sucf
beautiful dayp'
"Very" endorsing the sentiment al
enthusiastically as if it was perfectly
original;" and your farm looks so attrac
tive. Il often envy you your lotp"
"Yes, I like i'll" murmured Jeremiah
showing symptoms of recovery.
"Oh, you must!" and have you gooC
man to get suited in that respect"
eyes," jeremiah sighed, "minc doe
very well, but feel the need of a-a-'
"a wifel" said Miss Simpson appre
ciatively; Eyes, you should have one.
"I'm going tor--energetically-"an
you live so near, perhaps"
Miss Simpson became delightful.
confused.
"Please to speak little palmer, MI
Sykes"
"I-I-want a wife, Miss Simpson
viii you have me?"
A mingled sob and chuckle escaped
Miss Simpsons lips; and this being tn
appropriate crisis, she let her head sinl
upon his shoulder.
"Oh. jeremiah! are you sincere?"
"Of course ami Amt you?" sal
Jeremiah, taking the cue.
"Sincere now and alwaysl and T.
prove it by fixing an early day" !" and tn
customary "lover's seal" served as a
appropriate punctuation point.
"Now it's all donep' exclaimed tn
e relieved lover; "only don't tell any bod
vet awhile! It'll make such talk; and
feel $3.50 nervous!"
"Your wish shall be my law, Jer,
Inldu! was InS OUeuIenL IeSpOnSej al
an hour subsequently jeremiah took h
departure, leaving his fancee in a d
lightfully satisfied state, and finding h
housekeeper in condition of comme
surate CONSERVATION at his prolonged a
sence, and on the point of investigatiI
the well to ascertain if he had commi
ted suicide therein.
81 didn't know sparkling was SO easy
he soliloquized over his evening piT
"but therel I've no idea which one
the three proposed toi must remer
Der and ask. tomorrow. She'll knc
anyhowp
On the morrow, however, Jerush
the fortunate one, found to her vex
ton that she had business errand tn
must be attended to. Her sisters we
likewise gone out; and before starti
she called her Abigail.
Betsy, if Mr.. Sykes calls to-day t