The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1875-09-21
Sense and Mopsr,,se.

A St. Louis doctor has has offered
a reward Of $1,000 for an authenticated
case Of death from watermelon eating.
Evangelist Sankey photographs Queen
Victoria as 'just such pleasant. wo-
manly body as we see every Sabbath in !.
the amen. corner Of our Methodist chur-
ches in America
The consolidated Virginia mine would
be good thing to have in the family.
1t yields steadily supply of ore worth
$4,000 per hoL~. The stock lis quoted
at 1926 per share. A few years agoit
would enly bring S26. ~ SIS
A Scotch minister, who was famed
for his dryness in the pulpit, called on
one of his aged hearers, and as usual
partook of cup Of tea. He remarked
to the guild wife that her teapot ran
very slowly. "Deed, ay," quo the guild.
wife, sits like yerser; it has an unco
bad delivery"
"Thunder," exclaimed man. rush.
ing into railroad telegraph station the
other day. "The express trains gone
off the big bridget "Many killed,
many killed ?" screamed the by ISLANDERS.
"Not one" replied the other :She
just went on at one end ard went off at
the other, just as usual"
A Massachusetts man is currying fa-
vor with the fair sex by tract in which
he seeks to show that there are two
heavens, one for men and one for wo-
men. The latter are to pass into their
heaven without discrimination, but the
men are to be sifted before admission.
The ignorance of foreigners is some.
thing superb. Duman has written, an
American novel, in which coon chases
a couple of young United States lovers
up tree, and then tries to get them by
gnawing through the trunk Dumas
says the Virginia coon is as large as a
yearling calf.
This is the situation: Seven hundred
millions of currency to float debt cap
ital of twenty-five hundred millions Of
dollars in bonds and pay taxes, Federal,
! State and local, of at least eight hum
dred millions of dollars a year. Is
there any reason why money should not
be scarce and interest high.
It now seems probable that the defal-
cation of New jerseys late Treasurer
willturn out to be only $l6,116 66-
No wonder there is Indignation over
such steal. 1t was too small to be
anything but disgusting to the Radical
party, and Sooy ought to be at once
dismissed from his party ranks for
bringing it into contempt. Only $16,-
600. The man ought to be shot. But
then the party is playing out any way.
/ A colored man, employed as a deck
hand on propeller, was rushing around
town yesterday, and inquiring where the
polls were. "Polls ? Polls?" repeated
the citizen, "why, there's no election
going on now." "There hain't 7" "No,
sir" The man stood for a moment
looking greatly disappointed, and turn
ed for the river with the remark: Sand
now de programme is to find dat sleek
young man who said dey was paying
six dollars piece for voters y
He was level full, and as he boarded
q South Boston car, he remarked: -
s'Whazzer name that c'ductor tother
car r pointing vaguely at departing
vehicle. "Don't know" was the reply.
s.Well, he told me go takernap, ainter-
goint do it, I'm juss wideawakes he or
any otherman, and / don't want himmer
nobody else tell me gotakernap Z don't
you fergizzit." He elucidated the sub.
ject for some time to the passengers,
and finally stepped off to hunt up that
other conductor.
The editor of the Dresden Doings is
rather absent minded He held the po-
stion of local on the st. Albans Pion-
eer, several years ago, and was alone in
the office writing up some items one
morning, when stranger came in and
presented scrap of paper with the
words scrawled awkwardly: 81 am
dumb and deaf, and have nothing to
buy bread /; can you help me p. Wheel.
ing glanced at it, looked mp, then out of
the window, trying to recall local
item "How long have You been that
way" be asked, "a little absently =
"About ten years." said the dumb man,
thrown off his guard. The local in
stantly resumed his labors and the men,
idicant did not persist
! When youngster wishes to trick the
whole family at once, he does it by
abruptly asking, at the table, ssSay, pa,
We know that old man that lives up on
the Dodgetown roadl Then there is
general opening of mouths, and pa
and all the rest bend forward with
straining eyes and want to know "Why,
what's the matter with him2' The boy
allows them to reach the height of i'm.
patient interest in the matter, when he
cody announces: "Nothin', pa; Ionly
wanted to know ifyou knew him--that's
ALL" And sthe little upstart" catches
up his hat and rushes out of tbe house
; with chuckle, while all sorts cf appel
lations indicative of disgust follow him
from all round the table. In less than,a
,, week he will do it again.
rv~o Ns,o a =, GD l>ps Col ~ n