The New Orleans bulletin. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1874-1876, 1875-08-01
OUR GERMAN LETTER.

.,.- ho Tbouxht he could Walk Fast
-, q, turned ont was Practicable
moraI-Observations Of a New OrIeania
Abroad.
European Correspondence of the Bulletin.1
BERLIN, July 7. 1875.
Dear B,tIletin-I heard q funny thing til
other day, which is said to have actually o.
Cured in England, but am not quite pr
pared to accept the story at par, for, hk
many things that we hear of and read about
1t seems too funny to be true, notwithstano
ing the established adage that truth
stranger than fiction.
Of this adage it may be said that Will
truth is often quite as surprising as fiction
on the other hand fiction may extend to
degree of improbability that truth rarely O.
never does, SO that many romances of even I
possible nature fail altogether in being
accepted as variations of real occurrences
But this particular incident in hand may have
happened, for all that it seems unlikely. The
Joke hinges upon the venturesome spirit Of
the Yankee, though in this instance his ven.
ture was not of any heroic type.
We know that remarkable American spirit,
generally prevalent in our glorious country,
to count the chances of success in any under
taking more by what we wish them to be than
BY the indications of plain figures. and in
this way, if man finds that, according to all
rational calculations, his means will not reach
more than two. thirds toward the end, he will
count all the chances in his favor, no matter
how improbable, and with this encourage
ment will plunge ahead, trusting to some
streak of luck to get through This is the
way about one-hah the people build houses,
buy property, start in business, etc., etc., and
of course the chances of success are not real
lied in a majority of cases, and hence it
comes that sooner or later the adventurer be-
comes bankrupt.
So, in smaller way. our hero of the pres
ent story counted his chances, and came to
grief because he had reckoned without his
host He was railway traveller, perchance
tourist, or a gentleman of commercial pur-
suits, but in any case, long, lank Yankee,
with the characteristic "twang" of his race,
and the train by which he journeyed was
rapidly approaching Liverpool For some
time previously he had been observed examin-
ing his railway guide book very closely, and
finally he turned abruptly to his nearest
neighbor and began asking vague questions
about the situation, length and distance of.
ETC., of certain long tunnel just little out
of Liverpool. tI 90
Said be, stranger, about what time dye
think the trains will git there?" The stranger
thought it would be in about twenty minutes,
provided the train was on time. Then the
inquirer wanted to know if the stranger |
thought the train was on time. Yes, he |
thought it was Next came the query, pretty |
long tunnel that, ain't iii" Yes, rather long. |
"Well, about how long dye calculate we will |
be in it," The stranger thought four or five |
minutes. dead sure Of that are your" Yes, |
pretty sure. Then the Yankee reached down |
his pormanteau and took out q long fat |
beside him on the seat. and forthwith began |
to look steadily out of the window.
He was visibly agitated, and fingered that
mysterious bundle nervously. He also
loosened his collar and cravat, from which his
com panions doubtless began to thing that he
was. perhaps peculiarly susceptible to the
lamp air of tunnels and feared some attack,
Ind so must get free air before going into the
cavern. To strengthen this impression he
his vest and seemed to be hest
ating as to whether or not he should take off
ais coat All the while he was watching the
with morbid attention, and the
curious passengers who were his companions
we're also watching him. Then there was a
thrill whistle from the locomotive, and the
who had been previously interro-
yated remarked that that was for the tunnel,
md sure enough in another instant the car
iage darted into darkness. II
Now l may forestall the end by remarking
hat the peculiar anxiety experienced and ex-
libited by that tunnel struck Yankee was not
lue to any fear OF suffocation on his part. or
O other physiological reasons, but he had
while in that subterranean pass
.ge, and in the friendly darkness, to do
|. daring deed. Nothing less than-to put ,
IN clean Shirt Accordingly, the moment
he gloomy archway was passed he sprang fran !
ically up aud began operations. The passen-
,ers were conscious of some extraordinary ,
going on, for there were sounds !
# rustling cloth plainly audible even amid !
be clatter of the train, and in the faint glim-
ner of light that was present somebody could
70 seen standing up apd going through the
most remarkable motions. There then came J
sound as of starched linen being suddenly !,
ulled asunder, and succeeding that muttered ,
N precations, and finally the most energetic !
/
hose astonishing muscular exertions, which
ow became more plainly visible as the CLEAN s
f approaching daylight began to appear. I
here seemed to be man with his head in q | :
ack; it looked as if he were making the most j
.antic efforts to get ont of,it, but in reality I
Q was striving With desperate energy to get I
alto it, without having previously unfastened !
he cuffs and collar. !,
Need more be said2 All the gentlemen \
saders know what an exasperatipg thing it is 4
, find, after one works his hands into pair !,
stiff sleeves, that an extra Jealous washer i
oman has fastened all the buttons of his =
nirt, and Just fancy the horrible situation Of y
lis hapless wretch as the train dashed out d
ito broad daylight. and he was discovered IL
! that embarrassing predicament Of having s
loceeded only SO far with his efforts as to be i
either in the abominable garment nor out OF II
There is no more to tell and the story n
oes not say whether the spectators of this q
nheard-of scene we're all Of the same "persua- E,
on" as the performer or not, but for the sake a
propriety let us presume that it was !,