The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1875-12-09
He Didn't Have the Nerve.

Says the Cincinnati Enquirer: They
came to the Gibson House last Sunday
evening about o'clock in buggy and
registered as John Harris and bride,
from Grant County, Ky. He was young
and nervous, and she was more so than
he was. Would he take a room? Well,
he didn't know but what it might be
best. So the room was assigned, and
the bashful man and his bashful bride
disappeared up the elevator "while
silence like poultice,n etc. 1t might
have been IL O'Clock good evening, and
it might have been a few minutes later,
when Sam McGlassOn, the genteel clerk
on watch, was aroused from a delight
full dream of tied-backs by the slow and
solemn tramp, tramp, tramp of some
fellow descending the stairs. Sam
pricked up his ears like a mule at meal
time, and awaited the coming. Who
should heave in sight but Mr.. Harris,
from Grant County, whom, above all
others of his guests, Sam thought was
snugly tucked away in his little bed.
But Mr. Harris didn't look like a man
who had slept much during the preced-
ing forty-eight hours; nor did he bear
the ear-marks of a severe struggle with
Morpheus at that very moment. He de-
scended into the office and halted to look
at the spittOon, commonly called Gus
pidOre. After he seemed to understand
the cuspidore thoroughly, he walked
to the street-dOOr and gazed out upon
the night, as if he thought it might rain
before morning. His next move was
hn - ha -f-itt oil
away five cents on a pure Havana (llll-
nois) cigar. He lighted his weed and
sat down to smoke consolation out of it
while he studied the geological outlay
of his off big toe. BY the spasmOdic
puffS which the bridegroom eliminated
from his cigar Sam concluded that there
was some great trouble weighing down
the young mans mind like a jaybird on
fragile apple-sprOut, and he waited
for the development which he felt sure
was coming. 1t came. Down went the
half-smOked cigar onto the floor, and up
bounced the freshly formed married
man. With a stride that was marked in
every step by desperation he approached
the desk, behind which Sam stood with
the milk of human kindness in his eyes.
One glance at Sans pitying face gave
the Kentuckian heart, and he stammer-
ed:
''Can you ge-give me another-an-
Other-rOOm?"
Certainly; but what is the matter
with the one did assign you?"
Nothing; but you see-you see
well, can't you give me one near my
wife's roOm?"
"Why yes, only l should like to know
what you want with another room" A
bright idea seemed to strike Sam.
"Oh! see; some of your folks have
Gomez"
"Noah; the fact is my wife, you
know, is yOung-a mere schoolgirl,
and she is naturally timid; well, she
would sooner be alone tonight, | know.
The fact is, am not as bold as a lion
myself, and-well, you know how it is
yourself, maybe"
"Oh, nonsense!" said Sam; Z" go to
bed where you belong. III bet your
wife is wondering now what has become
of you"
"Well, if you must have it, then,"
said the blushing young Benedict, ''she
has locked me OUT
"Oh, ho! So, so" mused Sam, who
had been there himself. "That was an
hour ago, was it nOt?'
eyes"
"Well, I'll bet you sixteen cents the
door is now open" (Sam is rather in
clined to be a sport when it comes to
betting)
He accordingly jumped over the
counter, and, taking the bridegroom by
the arm, led him to the room like
lamb to the slaughter. The door was
tried and found unlocked. Sam pushedit
open, showed the bashful man into the
room, closed the door after him, and
went back to his desk well satisfied
with his humane interference with Mr..
and Mrs. Harris domestic troubles.
Now, who says hotel clerk has no
soul?