Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1875-03-16
MIscELLANEoUs.
Brasser's Son Glaudus.

Mr. Brasser, who lives on Ninth avenue,
has son about twelve years old named Claus
6ius, and the other evening this boy received
permission to allow neighbours. boy to stay
all night with him. The old people sleep
down stairs in the sitting room, and the boys
were put in room directly above When
they went to bed Claudius had the clothes
line under his coat, and the neighbours boy
hsd mask in his pocket They didn't kneel
down and say their prayers like good boys
aud then jump into bed aud tell bear stories,
but as soon as the door was locked the Bras
ser boy remarked (:
"YOu'll see more fun around here tonight
than would lie on a ten scre lot !"
From closet they brought out cast off
suit of Brasser's clothes. stuffed them with
whatever came handy, tied the mask and an
old straw hat on for a head and while one bow
was carefully raising the window the other
was tying the clothes line around the s.man."
The image was lowered down in front of the
sitting room window. lifted up and down once
or twice. aud old Brasser was heard to leap
ont of bed with great jar. He was Just be-.
ginning to doze when he heard sounds under
his window, and his wife suggested that it
was COW in the yard. He got up, pulled
the curtain away, and as he beheld man
standing there he shouted out:
''Great bottles but it's a robber and he
jumped into bed.
EsThedorius Brasser. are you a fool ~
screamed the wife as he monopolized all the
bed clothes to cover up his head
''Be quiet, you old jade, you'll" he whis>
Pered perhaps he'll go away!"
''DOu't you call me jade ~ she replied,
reaching over aud trying to fad his hair
Cit up and git the gun and blow his head
ofr'
sob you do it,
Cit up. you old coward" she snapped,
I'll never live with you another day if you
don't do it "
Brssser turned up the lamp, sat up in bed
and cried out
SIS that you, boys ?''
f.Mercy on me git up!" yelled the wife
ss the straw man was knocked against the
window.
"I'il blow his head off as clean as milk !"
SD Brasser in loud voice as he got up
He struck the stove three or four times, upset
chair, and reached behind the foot of the
bed and drew out an old army musket.
''Now. then, for blood ~ he continued, as
he advanced to the window and lifted the
curtain.
The man was there, face close to the glass,
AID he had such malignant expression of
countenancc that Brasser jumped back with
cry of alarm.
'.KHl him! Shoot him down, you old
noOdle-hcad ~ screamed the wife.
81 wildly thunder l will w replied
Brasser. and he bazed away, and tore out
nearly all the lower sash.
The boys up stairs uttered yell and a
groan, and Brasser jumped for the window
to see if the man was down. He wasn't
He stood right there, and he made leap at
Brasser
GILES coming in !..perlice !"-boys Tho!
perlice ~ roared the old man.
The tattered curtain permitted Mrs Brass
ser to catch sight of man jumping up and
down, and she yelled:
''Theodorius. I'm going to faint ~
''Faint and be darned Boys !-perlice I''
he replied, wolloping the sheet iron stove
with the poker
r'Dou't You dare talk that way to me r'
shrieked the old woman, recovering from her
desire to faint.
"Po>leece Po>leece" now came from the
boys up stairs, and while one continued to
shout the other drew the man up, tore him
limb from limb and secreted the pieces.
Several neighbors were aroused. an officer
came up from the station, and a search of the
premises were made. Not so much as track
In the snow was found, and the officer put on
and injured look and said to Mr.. Brasser:
ga guilty conscience needs no accuser"
''That's SO ~ chorused the indignant neigh
bors as they departed.
Gas Mr. Brasser hung a quilt before the
shattered window he remarked to his wife;
f'NOw see Whist an old cunduranso YOU
made of yourself ~
"Don't fling any insults at me, or TIL choke
the attenuated life out of you - she replied.
And the boys kicked around on the bed.
chucked each other in the ribs and cried
'Pd rather be boy than the President"
Detroit Free Press.
A California man pounded his wife, was
fDed $50, and lie sold her silk dress to pay
the fine.