The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1875-11-18
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

WHY is making love like studying
law 2 Because it's making ready for court
ing. -. .iois
have and no one wishes to lose! A bald
head.
known to the financial and moral world I
are vagabonds. -f's' - 80 :
Do Not entertain too high opinion Of
your own ability, and do not distrust the
abilities of others. u.gn u, co..,. -.
- If your sister fall into well, why
couldn't you rescue her? Because you
couldn't be brother and assist her too.
- A little boy, gazing upon an old
picture Of his mother, taken In low dress,
remarked, Mamma, you was mos ready
for bed when that picter was taken"
- "Bless you,p said John Henry, with
tears in his eyes, !ntshe takes her own hair
off so easy that perhaps she doesn't know
how it hurts to have mine pulled out"
- From the number Of trimmings now
put on ladies' dresses it is reasonably pre-
dicted that the coming winter is to be an
uncommonly hard oneLfor husbands and
fathers feA ~ -siS"f -
-The Chicago Inter.Ocean wants to
stop women from kissing each other
when they meet. Such kissing is, moth
ing; they don't bear on or roll their eyes
sinlge bit. i; Y.. 10. 80, -,.s1,
following epitaph = Here lies the body
Of Jas. Robertson, and Ruth, his wife ~
and underneath this text: "Ther;war'''
fare is accomplished. '."
- "Six feet in:hisq bbotsl" exclaimed
Mrs. Partington, nwhat will the impu-
dence of this world come to, 1 wonder.
Why. the,yy; might as well tell me the man
had six heads IN his hat. ~"
= A man; praising his porter said it
was SO excellentSa beverage that though
taken in great quantities, railways madej
him fat. i,Hf have seen, the stimej isan
| another, 4tiwhen -its made .you, -leens88s
seWhena. Isheuld ;be glad to know e & IL rin1
quired the euIogiat.s tsWhy, NO longer
than last night against a WALL ,g.,:-.
! 1T is related that when Mrs. Molly
Richardson, late Of Baldwin, Me-, was in
her ninetieth year, as, she was 'one,lday
eating fine apple, she reriafked that
she 1yould. like to raise some 'fruit'ofl that
kind. She therefore plantedc-these eseeds,i
one of which, .sprouted and became; q
thrifty tree, Mrs, RichandsonI lived to
be ninety-seven years old. And ate! fruit Y
nom snS;e,ss Texas Judge is credited with the
| following decision 'aTie fact is, Jones,
the iail IS an old, rickety Sffair, as cola ss'
an iron wedge!'i toapplied to this
court for a areieasec Oh bail, giving it as
your opinion thatcyOuf would fseezesto
death there The weather. has: not mod
Grated, and to keep you from freezing /
will direct the Sheriff TO hang you at 4
o'clock this afternoon, -. ;, .,
- A Boston paper says: We have just
paid six cents postage on q postal card
sent MS because the sender had thought
Ilessly written date on the side designed
for the address alone. FASTING anyiprin-
ted or written matter on either face; of
4 the card subjects it to double letter post
age. The directions are explicit. that
nothing but the name and address must
be written on one side of the card, and
that nothing must be attached to the
One gentleman observed to another
II have wife and six children in New
York and + never saw one of them.
"Were you ever blind?" "Oi no." re.
piled the other "a; further lapse of time,
and then the interrogator resumed the
subject. "Did I understand you to say
that YOU had never seen one of them q
eyes. such is the fact" Here followed
q stillionger pause in the conversation
when the iinterrogator,; fairly puzzled,
said: Chow can it be; that you never
saw one of them? ?" "Why,o was the
answer, zone of them was born after
left" .