The Republican journal., 1875-07-22
Those Circus Bills.

She had one in her hand as she came up
stairs, and She didn't say word until al
ter She had wiped her spectacles, placed
them on her nose, unfolded the bill and
read few OF the headlines.
She was old-tashioncd in look. There
We're strings to her bonnet she had no
hustle, her gray hair was combed down
smoothly, and there were only eleven yards
IN her black alpaca dress.
~ Dung man. don't You know that cir
cuses are awful liars and humbugs % She
finally inquired
lhe man at the table leaned back in his
chair and refused to express an opinion.
"Well, know it," She continued in a
positive tone, land believe they cit wuss
every day. Now see here-listen to this ::
A gorgeous panorama of amazing won
ders-a gigantic combination Of astonish-
ing acrobatic TALENT That's all RIGHT ON
the poster, but hey they got EN-? I'd
like to see one O. them animals"
'N cure laboring under mistake, mad
am. 1t means a grand display OF natural
cHosltles, and informs the public that
the proprietor has secured many tirst-class
acrobats-the chaps who stand on their
heads, turn head over heels and cut up so
many monkey Shines
cit does, eh ?" she unused; 'swaal, do
you believe it takes smart person to
keel over?"
We'll, one has to have q good deal OF
trainingn
They do, ell ?" she remarked, as she
put her umbrella in the corner and spit on
her hands; "l'll show YOU that YOU are
deceived I'm an old woman, but |
can't"
Madam, hold on - don't do it," ex-
claimed the man behind the table.
81 can flop right over there and never
shake my bonnet She said rs she rose
up.
II know you can, madam, but don't |
am here alone, and ii don't want You
to. I'd rather You wouldn't. If YOU are
determined on it | shall leave the room -
'Well, you know | can do it. and that's
enough. You may be right about what
that means, but see here-hear this The
highways ablaze with Respondent chariots
the Grandest pageant on earth Eve
bin to lots OF circuses, young man. and
never saw pageant yet. Ii they had one
the door OF his cage wasn't open"
on are also in error there The bill
refers to the fact that the great number of
wagons, chariots, etc, make up a SIGHT
worth seeing as they pass along the
strects.n
"Um-m-m, She muttered as she folded
the bill over; Il don't see why they
couldn't have said 50 then. And now see
here-read that: Sig. Goyinoff, in his
aerial flights Now, then, is that a boa con-
striclor or 4 cundurango?"
at is a man, madam-one Of the per
formers His real name is probably Jones,
but that isn't grand enough and so they
put him down as Sig Govinofl.' He is
the man who jumps off a rope, turns over
twice, and comes down all right. y
lie is, eh? Well, if he's got an idea
That he's the smartest man alive want to
disappoint him. / never did try to turn
over twice, but I'll do it right here now
or break my neck Git the things ofli'n
that table! F"
Stay, madam-don't, wouldn't have
you do it for fifty dollars
"Just once!"
sfor heavens sake, madam, get down
otf'n this table - here - here's a dollar if
you won't do it,"
Il don't want your money, and won't
try it if your SO scarf, but | don't want no
circus going around talking about aryal
flights and deceiying the peoplen
She satdown, the young man wiped the
sweat OIL his brow, and presently she re-
marked;
"And here's another thino. rjobt here
A sparkling asterisk, flashing across the
field OF the cloth Of gold-Mons. Come
rique in his great delineations of human
character ia like to know who she is y
tsM adam tIIt n
delineates character"
''How ?"
"Why, he makes up faces - expresses
mirth, sorrow, JOY, and so forth.
He does, eh? Well, what's that to
blow about? Make up faces-see here .
And she shut her eyes, run her tongue
out, and looked like the bottom of a brass
Kettle which had been kicked in by mule
lhey are humbugs, Sir" she said as
She drew her tongue in, ''and dye 'spose
~ pay hlty cents to 60 to one?n
al thing"
They are; eli? Entertaining. ell .
Well, i'll can't do more entertaining in five
minutes than circus can in all dav rll
leave my bonnet up here Here, hold on
to this chair"
MADAM. earnestly hope You are not
going to perform any tricks"
Il hain't Ell? You Just hold on to the
legs of this chair"
II can't madam wouldn't do it TO,
all the diamond pins in Syracuse Go
away, madam-go home! I'm in a hur.
ry!"
"Well, l won't then, but when l say
circuses are humbugs l can prove it.
don't kecr two cents for their big word;
and their panoplies, pageants, astersks
giraffes, aryal, georgouses and ourang
outangs-l can beat 'em all boiler myself!'