Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1874-12-26
THE ANCIENT GOOSE.

That's what they said of him
His muStache was gray he was past
thirty-nine, and not being married
was considered solitary. 1t matter.
ed little to him. The care of his
patients made him bright and act.
i've. His profession was sufficient
for his wants. He was the loved
and respected physician for halt
the families in the place, and he
never wanted for company and
friendship. Why he never married
had been the speculation of the vii
lage. The subject was now thread
bare, and they had ceased to talk of
it. He saw much of female society,
for he was one of those fine, rare
natures, that make brothers to
girls His genial good nature, and,
above all, his ability to keep Sc
crets, made him indeed, the brother
to half the girls in Wauchusetta.
They came to him with their little
pains and ills, and their little heart
breakings and love sorrows. For
one he had pills and advice, for the
other ready ear, counsel, help and
confidence.
No wonder Sally Depford became
fearful and angry to him, in her lit
tie difficulty with Sam Barrett. A
small rage made her more attract
i've. As the doctor heard the woe
full tale, he could hardly fail to study
her face with admiration.
Years, twenty his junior, rather
pretty, reasonably well educated,
sensible, and quite ready for a joke
at any time, she preferred the bright
side of everything. Hence her
present sorrow. She did not wish
to be bothered as she expressed it,
with serious love affair. It was a
trouble, Vexation, and interference
with her pleasure, and
Well therel it's entirely dreadful,
and don't want it, nor him. Just
as | was out of school, and prepar-
ing to have splendid time with the
girls, then this thing comes along,
and I don't like it.
That is SO, doctor, Is it not?
The doctor had no immediate re-
ply to make. He would consider the
case-and her.
There was something so attractive
about her face, and it was no small
wonder that Sam Barrett, the last
beau of the village, was desperately
in love with her.
She frowned. He was so slow.
Come, sir, parade your wisdom.
| can pay for advice, and want it.
Go to bed early, get up late, and
sleep it off.
That's very good for him. Tell
him that, please. AS for me, it
does not help bit. There it stands.
He will pursue me with attentions.
/ don't want
Snub him.
He not snubable, Snubbing
falls harmless on his good natured
temperament. l tried it, and it don't
work. He took it like a lamb.
Tell him you're not at home.
Then he leaves his card and says
he will call again. And he is sure
to do so.
Poor boy! He has it very bad this
time. The symptoms are alarm
ing.
They are, doctor, they are, and l
don't like it. It's a nuisance and a
bother, and besides that 1 hate him.
There!
Feel better, my dearP
Yes, for Pm getting mad. Ifeel
like breaking things, and
You do. You do it all the time.
Poor bOyI I'm not surprised Here
you go about the place, being as
attractive as possible, and then you
break all our hearts, and scold us for
it. What do you expect?
It's not my fault. / didn't make
myself.
Well-no-not exactly
For heavens sake, doctor, why
don't you do something? Advise
me.
Get married.
Doctor, you are too hateful.
presume SO; doctors always are.
But that's my advice. Get married,
then he can no longer trouble you.
Now, you're silly, doctor, and l
shant tell you any more. You don't
care straw for my troubles, after
all, and
Here she began to be teary aud
threatened to have a good cry.
My dear, my advice is not 80 bad.
You must admit that if You were
engaged he would leave you at
once.
l suppose SO.
Yes. Then get eAgaged, or if you
don't care to go so far, arrange with
some young nan to be engaged TO
him temporarily. Then your Sam
Hos not my Sam, thank heaven!
Tben your Sam will take unto
hin, another wife, and when all is
aecure @ you can break your engage
ment, and all will be serene .again.
What an absurd idea! jump into
the water for the sake of escaping
from drowning. / tell you I don't
want anybody's attention. 1t would
be dreaful trial to be engaged at
all, even in self defence.
Not if the other party would
gree to keep himself away, and