Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1874-04-03
CURRENT ITEMS.

THERE is daily average of fifty-eight
| and half tons of mail dispatched from
the New York Postofice. a
HELENA, Ark, has only two Chinese
restaurants, while the town has rodents
enough to run dozen. t
THIS has been good winter for sliding
down hill in Portland, Me-, as thirteen
broken arms and legs attest.
Boston has so much red tape in its
poor-office that it takes five days to send
| peck of potatoes to starving family.
| GoLD-HUNTERs are leaving Oregon in
large numbers for the Alaska mines. The
mines have not yet been practically e1-
plored.
DENVER (Col) was recently treated to
| grand mirage; no less than double
image of the Rocky Mountains, suspended
| in the air, sU TF
A CINCINNATI car-driver got forty-seven
persons into a street car the other day,
which shows that the packing season has
| not yet ended. ts sfgsq
Two wedding fees of $1,000 each have
| Just been given in Western New York,
and calls to that pastoral paradise are in
active demand.
DIo LEWIS SAYS that t'women need
| it in corsets; but instead of symmetry
they find cemeteries
THERE is going to be total eclipse of
the sun April Is, but it won't be visible
except in Africa, just where they don't
care copper for eclipses.
STEwARTsTowN, Me-, has forty men
whose avoirdupois is 5000 pounds, the
heaviest of whom is 303 pounds, and the
tallest six feet seven inches. .'
A MAN who does not appreciate the
Yankees " says the noblest inheritance
which New England leaves to her children
is poverty and consumption. ts&
AT San Francisco the other night, at a
grand masquerade ball, the judges award
ed the first lady's prize to the "Beggar
Woman" who proved to be man. ,a
JOHN VINEGAR keeps grocery store in
Baltimore, and he denies being any rela-
tive of old cider vinegar, but then you
hardly ever see any grocery vinegar that
is.
BENTON County (Mo) Patrons have re-
solved to totally abstain from the use OF
coffee until the price of the article shall
have been reduced within the reach of
every laboring man." III
A KENTUCKY woman poured hot water
down her husbands back to cure the
toothache, and the jury held that she was
practicing without a license and sent her
to jail for six months.
THE too rural editor of the Detroit Free
Press seasonably remarks: We have
our opinion of any COW which will stand
by and chew her cud when butter is SELL
ing at forty-fve cents pound"
ONE of the Selectmen of Bennington
VT, declared at the recent town meeting
that he was willing to print the town
report in full, if it took book as large as
Daniel Webster's Unabridged Dictionary.
THERE are two sisters who have lived
within six miles of each other, near Ben
nington, VT, for thirty years and yet have
not seen each other in this time, though
there is no ill-feeling between them-they
are simply "odd."
CAPT. G. l.. BRADY, who saved the
steamship Pennsylvania, lately, when in
a storm the Captain and first and second
officers were swept from the deck, has de-
clined to receive the gift of $1,000 offered
him by the steamship company, and en-
tered libel for salvage.
BEADED sunshades are coming into
fashion with delightful rapidity. The
handsomest are of black silk with raised
embroidery, dotted with fine jet beads In
reckless profusion. These new affairs are
from {" the other side" and the importer
would have it understood that the Duch-
ess of Edinburgh has one!
A BOSTON man is telling in series of
lectures What women will wear and
how they will wear it," Several other
gentlemen have heretofore tried to sug
gest to ladies intimately connected with
themselves what they should wear, but
for some reason have signally failed to
produce the desired impression.
SCIENTIFIC men say that if pianos stand
north and south the tone of the instrument
is much improved. This is true especially
when the piano is thumped by a learner.
About 100 miles north and south of you
is the proper position for the instrument
to stand when being manipulated by
young thing taking her first lessons.
BLACK alpacas will always be worn as
the most serviceable of dresses. They
vary in quality and degree, from the
coarse, frowzy fabric that quickly turns
rusty to the rich, lustrous brilliantine that
retains its color until the last shred is
worn out, and sheds the dust from its
glossy surface as duck shakes the water
from its plumage This year beautiful
new alpaca, with silk warp, is seen In
market, that closely resembles silk, at
$3.50 yard.
THE ORGAN as household instrument
has been rapidly growing in favor, and
the yearly sales are now enormous. a
good Organ remains in tune, is easily
kept in order, and blends naturally with
the quality of the voice. The advertise
ment of the Smith American Organ Co.,
in another column, is referred to the con-
sideration of our readers. This house has
an enviable reputation for good work ana
fair dealing.
THE new ten-cent shinplaster is regard
ed as great saccess by the amateur coun-
terfeiters. Its close resemblance 10 the
fifty-cent note has of late occasioned
MANY a small loss to the retail dealer.
This similarity has been taken advantage
of by designing persons, and instances
are given where the ten-cent has been
raised to a fifty-cent note. A case is re-
ported where the /" fifty-cent' from rev.
enue cigar stamp was pasted over the ng-
ure 10 of the new note, the size OF tne oU
exactly covering the figure 10.-Chscdgo
Times.
THE Painesville (Ohio) Telegraph de-
acribes a mammoth cheese which lately
passed through that town on It's way East.
II was mounted on a substantial platform,
to which was attached small castiron
wheels, so that it easily moved, and the
platform in turn was mounted on heavy
lumber wagon, drawn by two spans OF
horses. The cheese was cased In lgnt-
fitting cheese-box which was frmly Sc
cured to the platform to prevent sllding.
Its measurement was: Height, three leee
two inches; diameter, five feet four lncnes,