Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1874-12-09
FACTS AND FANCIES.

paw
Perry Carson, all dressed up in hi
new clothes, yesterday called at Esch'i
for ten cent cigar, sahl' "Woult
you have it strong or mild?' "Well
boss" said Perry, mot too strong or toe
mild; one dat's about pro rata"
If you girls really must make Christ
mas presents to your bachelor friends
give them something else than slippers.
A flannel bag that will hold hot fiat
iron, and won't be kicked off easily after
a fellow gets in bed isn't bad idea.
rs your intended husband in his con
versation and carriage a consistent
Christian2' asked a clergyman of a
young lady who was soon to be married.
an bis conversation he is very pious in
deed, but l never saw him in his CARR
age" was the innocent reply.
A lady teacher inquired of the men,
bers of class of Juveniles, if any OF
them could name the four seasons. In
stsntly the chubby hand of a five year
old was raised and promptly came the
answer, pepper, salt, vinegar and mus
tard."
A weekly paper IN Illinois describes
the editor of the other paper as "blear.
eyed hitching- post, goatfaced gunny
sack, warteared bung-hole for cider
barrel, and plaster cast for the poop
deck of a canal boat" There must have
been dearth of society news that week.
The other day drove of one thou
sand turkeys passed through Barre, Vt,
driven like so many sheep. When night
fell, all would, by general consent, leave
the road and take to the fences, and
their drivers had to wait till morning,
for they could get them no further.
The easiest and simplest remedy for
chapped hands is found in every one s
kitchen, and is nothing more than COM
mon starch. Reduce it to an impalbable
powder, put it in a muslin bag, and keep
it in the table drawer. Whenever you
take your hands out Of the dish.water or
suds wipe them dry with a soft towel,
and while yet damp, shake the starch
bag all over them and rub it in. The
effect is most agreeable.
For a highly original method OF
furnishing young lady pupils commend
us to Herman Summers, of Peekskill.
He has been arrested for violently bit
ing the ear of one of his girls, and he is
said to have been in the habit of biting
his pupils ears after scolding them, for
some time. II demonstrated with, he
would laugh and say that he would as
soon eat a good square meal Of girls
ears as Of anything else.
The bell punch" invented to keep
car conductors honest, has been beaten
Two kinds of spurious bells have been
made and sold to initiate the true
ring" One of these is carried in the
palm Of the left hand, and the other up
the sleeve. Several conductors have
been found using these articles, one of
whom confessed that he kept two bank
accounts. The companies will have to
try again-ingrained or confirmed dis
honesty is hard to beat. When, more
over, men with two or three aliases are
found as conductors in the New York
Third avenue cars, it is a pretty good
sign that there is something wrong
Brooklyn Argus.
The dead letter Office in Washington
and every large city Office collects the
most curious museum Of miscellanies,
for the postoffice is kind Of parcel ex-
press, as well as carrier Of correspond
ence. The visitor will see yarn stock
ings and little shoes, and small boxes,
and even little fruit trees, with myriads
of other things, retained for want Of
proper postage. The postal rates are
such that dead weight can be sent by
mail for just half the rate at which you
can send book. Almost the entire
bullion Of the Pacific passes through
the mails. Mr.. Dawes. who tells US
these facts, says that friend Of his was
in q postal car when the mail bag was
opened, and out rolled from it huge
bolt. 1t was on its way from Springfield,
in Massachusetts,, TO some large machine
works in Ohio, and its passage in the
mail cost only ten cents.