The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1874-04-11
aait and gumor.


A Slack Husband Punished.
q Moncton," said my grandmother, Il
have no wood to burn to-day. What shall
do2r
"0h, send Louisa to pick up some"
said the good man, making stride to-
wards the door.
But she has picked up all she can
Rnd
eTheu let her break up some old
stuff
sBut she has broken up everything
already
aOh well do the next best thing-I
must be off, said the father, and off Ne
was, whistling as he went, and no doubt
wondering in bis heart what the next best
thing would turn out to be.
Noon came and with it came my grand
father and four hungry laborers. My
grandmother stood in the kitchen spinning
on her great wheel and singing pleasant
ditty; Louisa was securing in the back
room, and the cat sat purring on the hearth
before black and fireless chimney, while
the table sat in the middle Of the room,
spread for dinner, with empty dishes.
Well, wife, here we are" said my
grandfather, eheeriugly.
So I see, replied she, plaeidly; shave
you had good morning in the corn feld2"
Why, yes, 50. But where is the din
ner9"
q In the pot on the doorstep. Won't
you see if ii is done?"
And on the doorstep, to be sure, sat
the great iron pot, nicely covered, but not
looking particularly steamy. My grand
father raised the cover and there lay the
ingredients of nice boiled dinner--every-
thing prepared in the incest manner.
why, woman, what does this mean ?"
Began my grandfather, Indignantly. "This
dinner isn't cooked at all r.
Dear me, is it not2 Why it has sat
in the sun these four hours"
" Sat in the SUM-"
Yes, you told me TO try the next best
thing to have fire, and thought setting
my dinner in the sun was about that
My grandfather stood doubtful for a
moment, but finally his sense Of humor
oyercams his sense of injury, and he
laughed aloud. Then picking up his hat,
be said
Come, boys, we may as well start for
the woods. We shall have no dinner un-
I'll we have earned il I perceive"
Won't you have some bread and
cheese before you go?" asked my grand |
mother, generous in her victory, as women
almost always are. And so she won the
day.
The cellar stairs in the old farm house
had become broken and SO unsafe that my
grandmother besieged her husband, early \
and late, to repair them, lest some acct
dent should happen. He always promised
TO do 50, and always forgot to fulfil his
promises. At last one day, my grand
mother fell in going down, and spilled the
milk she was carrying
Are you hurt n asked my grandfath-
er, smoking his pipe beside the FIRE.
g No matter whether / am or mott re-
turned the angry housewife, re-appearing
with her empty pan. aThas is the last
time carry milk down those stairs until
they are meuded"
Z Please yourself and End the next best
way to get il down" said the husband,
little yexed at her tone.
~ win, said my grandmother, and she
was as good as her word. The next eve
ming my grandfather went down to the
cellar to draw some cider.
What in the thunder |" exclaimed he
nothing worse I assure you, for he was
not q profana man-ewbat in the thunder
Is the matter down here? why woman
your milk Is all over the cellar bottom r
Is it21 replied my grandmother, tran
luilIy '.WelI, | think that is likely
'uough, falling 50 far !
Falling SO far2 What do you mean
(. Why you know | said I shouldn't
AIRY milk over those broken stairs again,
nd you told me to try the next best way
{ getting ]; down, and so ! took up a
'oard IN the kitchen floor, threw down the
ans aud fheu strained the milk down into
hem.
The cellar stairs we're mcnded next
s.
Be careful how You drink. or you'll