The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1874-12-19


and see me capture a motnerrin.
law at eight o'clock, sharp "
A New Jersey clergyman says
there are about twenty different
kinds of religion, but man who
won't wash and shave and put on
clean shirts can't enjoy any of
them.
81 would not be q woman, for
then ] could not love her." says
Montague. Lady Montague says:
THE only objection / have to be-
ing a man is that / should then
have to marry woman"
Lady-"Before engage you, !
should like to know what your re-
ligion is" CoOk-"Oh, ma'an
] always feel it my duty to be of
the same religion as the family
I'm in"
The people who walk up to one
sideways, whose approaches are
crab like. and whose looks are
aslant, have likewise been made
the subject of remarks not alto.
gether free from prejudice.
A Western paper says of the air,
in its relations to man. at kisses
and blesses him, but will not obey
him" Blobbs says that descrip'
tion suits his wife exactly.
Another English bar maid is in
luck. She is the fGncer of
young nobleman, whose relatives
say he shall never wed the girl
while they are alive. He is plucky
and says he shall, and prepare
lions for the wedding day have
commenced.
"Och," said love sick Hiber.
MAN, what recreation it is tC
be dying for love! 1t sets the
heart aching SO delicately, that
there's no taking a wink of SLEEP
for the pleasure of the pain!"
A resident of Erie, Philadel
phia, refused to marry his affianc
ed who had come over from Ger
many for the purpose, because
she had not brought feather bed
with her. She has now brought
suit for breach of promise against
him and claims LOCO damages.
A iuryman was asked whether
he had been charged by the Judge
"Well," said he' "the little fellow
who sits up in the. pulpit and
stares at the crowd gave US 6
lecture, but / don't know Wheth
er he charges anything or not"
A comfy treasures in Alabama
can't read or write, but he ha:
put $1,000 where no one but him
self can find it. This shows thai
collegiate education is not essen
tial to the Requirement Of wealth
A DoWN-EAsT Sabbath school
with a view to future con
tingences, makes the scholar
sing
Il want to be an agent,
AVID with the agents stand;
A percentage In my pocket,
Ana sample in my hand
Too quick to generalize was ais
that merchant who gave the fol
lowing sage advice to a cler
about to start in business on hi
own account: "Sell all you pleas
to a buyer with bent nose, bu
don't ship the goods until 20
have made the strlctest inqui
rieS."
Poor young thing! she fainte
away at the washtub, and he
pretty nose Went ker- slOp into tn
soapsuds. Some said it was Ovel
work; others, however, whisper
ed that her beau had peeped owe
the back fence and called out
'.HulIo, there, Bridget, is Mis-
Alice at home?"-NeU York Con
m1erciGJ.
Mr.. P.'s little daughter cam
running tOher aunt one day, say
ing, AUNT Kate, little Matti
has swallowed buttonp Seem
her terror, her aunt calmly re
piled, "Well what good Wi
that do her?" Said the child yer
seriously, "Not any that | can Sc
unless she swallows a button
holen
Josh Billings says: "If yu ar
going to Civ man emmy thin
Civ it to him cheerfully, an
quick, don't make him git dow
on hiZ kneeZe in front Ov W., an
listen to the ten commandments
and then yu Civ him 3 cents"
Mark Twain thus crusheth tn
hopes of lecture managers in
letter to Mr. Redpath: "YoU
offer of $4,000 to lecture fit
nights does not tempt me.
have run about the world long er
ough. I mean to live and die