The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1874-08-20

me humlllat1OnS winch environ Ills
enterprise---he has growingly felt
that [ had a power to help which |
did not develope, and [ believe that
you have participated in this feeling.
II is natural you should. 4. is
dearer to you than / can be. He is
with you-all his trails lie open to-
your eye daily. But [ see you but
seldom, and my personal relations,
environments, necessities, limitations,
dangers, and perplexities, you cannot
see, nor imagine. If had not gone
through this great yea" of sorgoao
| would not have believed that any
one could pass through my expert
ence and be alice or sane.
I have been the centre OF three
distinct circles. each of which 1e-
CURED observation-disclosures and peculi-
arly inventive, or originating power,
viz
/. The great church.
2. The newspapers.
3. The book.
The first [ could neither yet out
Of, nor slight. The se?sSitiveneSs
Of SO many Of my people would have
made any appearance of trouble,
or any remission Of force, an occasion
Of alarm and notice, and have excited
where it was important that rumors
should die and everything be quoted.
The newspaper I did roll of-doing
but little except give general direc-
tons, and in so doing [ was continu-
ally spurred and exhorted by those
in interest. 1t could not be helped.
The life of Christ, long delayed,
had locked up the capital Of the firm,
and was likely to sink them finish
ed it must be. Was ever book born
of such sorrow as that was ;? The
interior history Of it will never be
written. During all this time yo't
literally were all my stag and COM
fort. [ should have fallen on the
way, but for the courage which you
inspired and the nope which you
breathed.
My vacation was profitable. l
came back hoping that the fitness
of death was past. But IT'S troub-
lie brought back the cloud with even
severer suferings. So all this Fall
and Winter | have felt that you did
not feel satisfied with me, and that [
seemed both to you and t. as con-
tenting myself with cautious or
sluggish policy-willing to save
myself, but not to risk anything for
L. [ have again and again probed
my heart to see whether [ was truly
liable to such feeling, and the re-
sponse Is unequivocal that [ am not.
No man can see the difficulties that
environ me, unless he stands where
[ do. 70 sag that [ have church
on my hands is simple enough !;
but to have the hundreds and thou
sands OF men pressing me, each one
with his keen suspicion, or anxiety,
or zeal-to see tendencies which,
if not stopped, would break out into
a ruinous defence of; me to stop them
without seeming to do it; to prevent
any one questioning me; to meet
and allay prejudices against t.,
which had their beginning years
before this to keep serene, as if I
was not alarmed or disturbed ; to be
cheerful at home, and among friends,
when l was suffering the torments
Of the damned, to pass sleepless
nights often, and yet to come up
fresh and full for Sunday. ALI this
may be talked about, but the real
thing cannot be understood from the
outside, nor its wearing and grind
ing upon the nervous system.
God knows that L have put more
thought, and judgment, and earnest
desire into my efforts to paepare a
way for [. and E. than ever I did
for myselfa hundred-fold.
AS to the outside public, I have
never lost an opportunity to soften
preJudlces, TO refute falsehoods, and
to excite kindly feeling among all
WHOM ! met. | am thrown among
clergymen and public men, and
the makers of public opin-