The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1874-12-25
THE COMING WIFE.
How She Helps Her Husband Under
fficuIties - Patience and Sun.

From the Detroit Free Press.
She's a little bit Of a woman, all pa
tience and sunshine, and Id spoll-the
best silk hat that money could buy for
the privilege of lending her my umbrella
in a rain storm.
She's married and she's got an old rhI-
nocerous of husband. He makes 1T a
practice to come home tight at II o'clock
every other night, and has for years, and
be can't remember that she ever gave
him cross word about it. When he
falls into the hall she is waiting to close
the door and help him back to the sitting
room. where a good fire awaits hlm. she
draws off his boots, unbuttons his collar,
helps him Off with his coat, and all the
time she is saying:
aPoor Henry! How sorry am that
YOU had this attack Of vertigo! l am
afraid that YOU will be found dead by the
roadside some night"
"Whazzer mean by verzingo: he
growls: but she helps him Oft with his
vest, and pleasantly continues:
I" IN so glad you got home all right |
hone the day will come when You can
pass more of your time at home. 1t Is
dreadful how your business drives you.
"Whaz bizshnsss-whaz- yer talking
bout he replies. ,
"Poor une-how hot your head Isl she
continues and presently he breaks down
and wecps, and exclaims; :.
UYez, zur-zics 'orsc-wearlng zeii
out fhast's can-wishzi was dead!
Next morning she never refers t" the
subject, but pleasantly inquiries how ne
Lint and if his mind is clear. His boots
msy be missing, and he yclls out;
.:Whar'n thunder's my boots"
Right here my dear, she replies, ana
hands them out all nicely blacked up
If she wants dress, or hat, or a
cloak and he wells out that household
exnenscs are eating him up, she never
ossssesr him back, nor tells him that she
cnuld have married Congressman nor
declares that she will write to her poth-
er and tell her just how 1t Is. ,-,.
.Tb.t,s 40 nv dear-times are hard,
she saws and she gets up Just as good q
dinner AS if he had left her htly dollars.
He NAV come home tight AT supper
time hut she is not shocked. she re-
,,arts that il is An unexpected pleasure
~ hova him home so early, and she pre-
.onds not to notice his stupid look. lie
.oas .bree chairs where there Is but one,
and in irving to sit down he strikes tue
aoor like the fall of q derrick: ~.
aWbsz,er Jaw THAT chair way FOR
hs wells. and she replies:
.:Its that hole in the carpet NV
vcu would stumbled and she helps MIN
nm and brings him a strong cup o, TEA
They do not keep a servant, and wheh
Ia weather came she never Thought o'
nIsnkinq herself down in char opposite
10 him and saving:
aNow then, you'll either get up and
ruht the fires or there won be any
HshtaS-m.rk that, old baldhead.
No. she didn't resort to any su'h oas.
and tvranical measures. when Gavnsn'
comes she slips out of bed, makes W. wv
ares warns his socks and then oehu'i's
over him, she whispers: ..;-,
arise, darling, and greet the festive
mornr rr. known
49, womsn To coax him for two strsigh'
- % take the doctors medicine, turn
over over his pillow twenty-five times Keep a
oa.' o, 10th M on his head, pare his corn down
md then wish that she had guam ~
nn.s anu hin him some soup. When he gets int6
n's s'sh, dawn town and comes home with
~ sars bitten up and his nose pointed &c
.ha s nnr,besst, she inquiries how the ho,st
tue hol. =, run away with him, and she
nSp a.Ig .be is 20 thankful that he WASH