The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1874-02-17
Mussey at the Capital.

E. d. Mussey, E-q., of the Cincinnati
Times, is on duty at Columbus, and is
using his scalpel cutting off the cancers
and carbuucles that have long been sap
ping the good name of the capital of the
State Of Ohio. Mussey is a strong, viva
cious writer, and deals very sparingy in
soft soap, as will be seen by an extrac. or
two which we append to funny article
from The Ohio State Journal:
A QUILL.DRlvER ABRoAD-TuE ADVENTURES
OF A WICKED NEWSPAPER MAN-soME
SEVERE CRITICISM AND SOME vERITABLE
TRUTH.
Youth, beauty, opportunity aud relig.
iuus Influence have allied them-elves to
sweeten the temper Of the Columbu. rep.
Itseu,ative Of the Cincinnati Tlmcs IF
ID. L. J. but his perversity is beyond the
operation OF the tender attributes. Iu
spicy letter he wickedy pecks at Co!um.
bus with his newspaper hatchet. In his
wrath. he uDguaruedly cobie-ses that he
don't know the points of the COMPASS
He had general idea that Cincinnati was
south of Columbus, but the termination
Ut the Little Miami railroad in the north
eud of the town was the rock on which
he split. Cast out under the shadows Of
our venerable depot, he was still north.
ward bound. TO assure himself be hauled
out Mitchell's Primary Geography Zone
he had lett after retiring from the book
business in Vermont) and consulted the
frontispiece. There stood the boy with
his arms outstretcbed. Unfortunately,
Mussey was standing the wrong way. If
he had faced about" a great deal of
trouble might have been saved. He
might have rushed into the heart Of the
city. and still labored under the fond de.
lusion that he was going northward. But
he didn't. "Rigbt hand to the east )"
left hand to the west" said he, consult.
ing the picture north must be straight
ahead y and tying his red Bapdanna to
a whalebone cane, and shouting "Excesi.
or" he rushed past the ranks Of musical
hackmcn, and broke for Northwood
Heights
Now that locality is on the very out.
skirts of a neck of the corporation line,
and there is only about a mile of side.
walk above the depot. Let us draw
curtain over Mussey's trip up the Worth.
ington road for 10 ! it was written on
his boots, and his own silent communings
were recorded in the big book on the 9th.
er side Of Jordan. He finally arrived at
a village adjoining the Heights, four miles
from the Capitol. "ls this Columbus ?"
he asked of u man who looked as though
he might be member Of the Legislature
from one of the agricultural districts.
"Yes, this is North Columbus" Nue.
seys faith shook within hiln. He didn't
believe the rural rooster. "Well," said
he nervously, sis this the Capital of
Ohio ?" "lt's capital place to come
to-" said the native, who owned two hum
dred acres of town lots three miles fur.
ther up the road. where's the Neil
House ?" roared the infurated correspon.
dent. That's in village several miles
south Of this was the reply. We never
found out where Musscy slept that night,
but when he came in the next morning
he bad hay seed on his shoulders, and
when the waiter at hotel asked him if
he would have chicken, be said no be
had been surfeitcd with the raw material.
Ever since thi4 distressing experience
Mussey's temper toward the streets of
Columbus has been soured. In his letter
he indulge> in some caustic comments on
the deplorabe condition Of our highways,
aud 10 a large extent we confess judgment.
lie speaks Of public houors heaprd upon
Columbus, aud then applies the lash to
he municipality for "sitftiug down 10 her
dirt, year after year, ragged. unk.npt
aud filthy, like greasy Kitchen wench
,et to guard the jewels Of an Emperor
As to the streets, We are willing to
take the punishment, distributed 10 doses
But when the Times man, with his wit
wbettod by his success in exposing our
tboroughiares, pitches into our srchitec.
ture, We cross swords wooden swords en-
circlipg graphte) and cry Hold" To
say that all the beautiful specimens OF
architecture in Columbus have been put
there by the State, is too much. The
State has three fine buildings within the
city limits-the Capitol and Institutions
for the Blind and Deaf and Dumb aud
it took about half century to got the
State to fence in Capitol Square. This
talk about Columbus getting everything
from the State has been the stock in trade
Of the members from the back townships
ever since the location of the Capital.
We hope our Metropolitan brother won't
fall into the crooked way. The Times
ought to send its representative SO so to
hire horse and buggy and get around
and see the buildings put up by private
enterprise in Columbus, and some of the
manufacturing interests.
Levity and war aside, Mussey is cor.
respondent of "wit and words and WORTH"
and judgment. Hear bin.
"If q person comes here from Cincin.
natl stranger he is "turned round" for.
evermore. The little Miami road brings
him around to the north end of the city,
when he knows he comes from the south,
and the cars dump him 10 that ancient
accumulation of old lumber, boards, bogs,
snk-holes. poverty, dirt and stinks called
the Union Depot He sets out to High
street alive (perhaps), and starts down
that famous boulevard under the i'm
preston, Of course, that he is going north.
having landed naturally at the south end
of the city. That is the way got fixed,
aud can never get upfxed and straight
ened out. When | go 10 the depot 60
due south the sun rises with cheerful
regularity in the west,and sets with great
equanimity in the east. Now and then
l make frantic effort to right myself
upon the points of the compass. whirl
a honi fonr fi,naa fnrn a dnnhla ao.aa.