The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1874-05-29
Odds and Ends.

births are being announced a. :. Our
Young Folks for May in the Turner Fails
Mass Reporter.
-" Kissing your sweetheart" saws a
.rifling young man. = is like eating soup
with fork; il takes "A long time TO get
enough"
The velvet-footed assessor has begun
his hideous work. and property is depre-
eating with frightful rapidity. -Brzsrs-
icicker.
Some men never lose their pres nee of
mind. In Milwaukee. a man threw his
mother-in-law out of the window from the
nth story of a burning building and lift
ed up tenderly a feather bed. which he
carried down stairs safely in his arms.
"A Connecticut lady remained too long
on train to kiss female friends the other
day. and. trying TO get of after IL had start
ed, was thrown on her face. IF ever
kiss anybody again y she said rev6 nge-
fully. a. she arose, 'any woman. at least. .
she added. thoughtfully, then it will be
when am crazy"
Ole Bull was once seeing the sights at
Donnybrook Fair. when he was attracted
by the sound of very loud violin in tent.
He entered and said. MY good friend. do
you play by noteg' The deuce note.
sir" Do you play by ear. then - Niv-
or an ear. yer honor" How do YOU
play, them BE main strength, be jab-
bers."
"A youngster was picked
up by visitor of the family. who. dand-
ling him on his knee. said = / wish had
this little boy; ] think there's money in
him." To which promptly responded the
child: :" know there is. for | swallowed
cent when | was at grandma's the other
day ."-Horfford Post.
Mrs. Magruder will probably leave
DIR. Hopkins's church and 20 hereafter 10
the Presbyterian Westinghouse. Dr.
Hopkins last week had n frightful boil on
his leg. and inexperienced very severe pain
when he tried To walk. While lac was sit
ting in his study, on Friday. Mrs. Magru-
der was called and ushered into the parlor.
The servant went up the back stairs 10
tell the doctor, and while she was on the
way the doctor started to go down the
front stairs TO get drink of water. Ii
hurt him 30 much 10 walk up the steps.
that he concluded 10 slide down the banis-
ter on his stomach. and so. after looking
carefully over the landing. to satisfy hims
self that nobody was about. he mounted
the banister anG began to descend The
stairs ran directly past the parlor door.
and Mrs. Magruder was amazed 10 see the
clergyman descending with great rapidity.
in that singular fashion. II seems that
the servant had placed the coal-scuttIe by
the newel-post. while she went for the
doctor, and, a. he descended with awful
velocity. ne alighted in the scuttle and
fell TO the floor. Without being aware of
the presence of the visitor. he lcapcd up
in "A rage and cxclaiming. Hang that
woman :" he gave the scuttle kick
which sent IL whirling into the parlor.
where it brought up in Mrs. Magruder's
lap. OF course she thought the demon
stration and the ejaculation were intended
for her. and after rising 10 her feet and
shaking her umbrella al her pastor. she
shouted: IF you kick another coal
scuttle ai me. I'll punch the stl.fin' out Of
you with this yer uTnbrcllcr,n She
emerged from the front door with con-
vction that Presbyterianism was the only
religion for her. -DanbEry Neiss.