davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A Highland clergyman, eminent for his
piety and simplicity Of heart, but also
noted for great eccentricity of character,
surprised his bearers by introducing the
following passage into one of his prayers
80 Lord we desire to offer our grateful
thanks unto Thee for the seasonable relief
which Thou hast sent to the poor of this
place, from Thy inexhaustible store house
in the great deep, and which every day
we hear called upon our streets: Fine,
fresh herrings, sax a penny sax a pen
ny"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A very portly gentleman being obliged
to take trip across the country, off from
the railroad route, sent servant to the
stage Office to secure him two seats, so
that he should not be crowded.
The man soon returned, and was asked
if he had executed the order, and he re-
piled that he had
"In what part of the coach are the
seats 7" said the gentleman.
Zone is on the inside of the stage and
the other is outside with the driver" said
the shrewd fellow
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

SOMEWHAT CoNDENsED A French
chemist is said to have condensed the body
of his wife into the space of an ordinary
seal, and had her highly polished and set
in ring. He made nice income by bet
ting, with lapidaries and others, that they
could not tell the material of the set in
three guesses, and after pocketing the
money, burst into tears, and say: 1T is
my dear, dead wife. l wear her on my
finger to keep alive pleasant remenbrances
of her"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

At prayer meet of colored people in
Erie, the decency and good order of the
meeting being disturbed by negro nam
ed Brown. whose prayers in public were
only ineoherent rawlings, the paster inqur-
ed: "What fool nigga's dat prayn' down
dar near the doe ?" A dozen people re-
piled with one voice: at am bruddah
Brown. sah." "Den" replied the pastor,
"Bruddah Brown subside, and let some
one pray dat's better 'quainted wild de
Lord p
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A CoNsIDERATE HusBAND.-This man
knew what he was about He lived in
the country, and in buying an axe the
other day, he was particular to select the
smallest he could find. An acquaintance
axed him why he did SO, and he replied
"Well my wife isn't enjoying very good
health this winter, and if get heavier
one, I'm afraid she won't be able to cut
the wood"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

"Hans," said his grandfather one day,
"take this jug ana go out and get me some
beer" "All right, give me the money"
'Oh it is easy enough to get beer with
money, the thing is to get it without mon
ey." Hans goes out and soon returns
with the jug. His grandfather, after try
ing in vain to get drink says: Hans,
this jug is empty" 80 much the bet
ter" replied the nrchin. ait is easy enough
to drink beer when the jug is full the
thing is to get drink when it is empty"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A bachelor had the blues, and applied
to doctor for medicine The doctor in
quired into his case, and wrote prescrip-
ton in Latin, which the bachelor took to
the drug -store. Translated, the prescrip-
ton read: Seventeen yards of silk, with
a woman in it," After the druggist got
through laughing, the bachelor proposed
to lady that evening, and was married
in two weeks.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

THE RULING PASSION STRONG IN DAM
eER.-An alarm of fire was the other day
given in New York hotel. Landlord" !"
said guest, 'is the house on fire ?"
Yes sir" "Well, give us one more
drink if you please, and we'll get!'
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

An icicle nearly two feet long fell from
Main street building, Friday afternoon,
and went point first down the back of an
elderly gentleman who was standing on
the walk below talking about foreign mis-.
sions. The subject was Immediately
changed. Damb,ry News.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

An Iowa girl. who probably knows
whereof she speaks, says: "Some men
are always talking about patronizing their
own town-always harping on that duty
and yet they 60 abroad to get married
while here we all stand waiting! l do
hope that some of the men who marry
eastern women will get cheated"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A German saloon keeper in Millersburg
says: "Ven l goes to mine bet l sleeps
not good. dreams in mine head dat |
hears dem vemens braying and singin' in
mine ears dot Jesus loves ME. Dot
bothers me SO got right straight up and
walk on de floor and take anudder glass
of beer"
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

We are told that a Detroit man has
lived two weeks on sixteen cents, and
Z" hasn't been hungry at ll,"-but we
don't believe it. If the cents had been
the big oldfashoned ones, they would
have hardly appeased his appetite two
weeks. Why, we once knew man who
lived for three years on big hill, and he
was hungry pretty much all the time.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

A Chinese girl is now undergoing trial
at Pekip, charged with being the captain
of piratieal craft recently blown up in
one of the Chinese rivers But she
couldn't help it She had no husband and
had to blow up something.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

One of cur residents about to depart
West. desires to sell sitting in one of the
most eligible groceries in town. The
stove is one of the most powerful in the
market and the cracker and sugar barrels
are within easy distance - Danbuy Neus.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

Hen manure mixed with ashes and in.
corperated in the soil about strawberry
plants is an excellent fertilizer for them.
1t will pay you to buy it at 6fty ,sats per
bushel if you can get it.
Middletown transcript., 1874-05-23

There is prejudice in hnmau kind
against large ears. As the poet says:
" Man wants but little ear below nor
wants that little long"
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
GBe ,Tm1ts, Acru BloonrheIO, 11a.

The Way to do It.--This is how they
treat the tramps' at the Lancaster co.,
poorhouse g No tramp can get single
meal without first doing one hours work.
Tramps quarried all the stone for the new
almshouse, and in addition they quarried
$500 worth for Lancaster city, with that
amount still remaining ON hand for sale.
The excavation Of the new almshouse was
dug mainly by tramps, and they are now
engaged at leveling the ground in front of
the new building, about twenty of them
being employed at that work. If they are
sick, however, they arc kindly cared for
and are not required to work" If some
arrangement could be made so that the
chaps who seek lodging in the Jail in this
borough could be compelled to work, it
would be great saving to the tax payers.
Even if the work was of no advantage to the
public, it would soon reduce the number of
applicants, for many of them have holy
horror of honest labor. Over one hundred
were furnished accommodation at this Jail
during the past month.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
A GenerOus Offer.

Mr.. James Wick in his Floral Guide, makes
the following offer
" For the purpose of encouraging the culture
and love of flowers, l authorize the officers Of
every State and Territorial Agricultural Society
In the United States (and where there are two
prominent Societies In one State, both,) and
the Provinces of Canada, to offer, In my behalf
the following premiums
For the best Collection of Cut Flowers,
$1,000, Second best, $1,000, Third Best Col
lection of Cut Flowers, $500, Fourt Best, Floral
Chrome.
The offer is made TO amateurs only, and the
flowers to be exhibited at the regular Annual
Fairs. The awards to be made by the regular
Judges, or by any Committee appointed for the
purpose. When only one collection Is exhib-
tied, the Judges may award the first, or any
other premium, according to merit, but the ex-
hibition must be a creditRble one, and If not 80
in the opinion of the Judges, no premium TO
be awarded. The flowers not TO be made up In
bouquets, but exhibited separate and named
l shall not consider this offer accepted by any
Society, unless published In the regular Pre-
MUM List, so that all may have an opportunity
to compete. The money will be forwarded
by DRAFT on Bank Of New York, City, as
soon as the award is made known to us, either
to the officers of the Society, or to the persons
obtaining the premium.
also authorize the officers of every County
Society In America to offer one OF my Floral
Chromos for the best exhibition of Cut Flow
ers. Now let us have some grand exhibitions
Of flowers.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
Big Invention.

Lloyd, the famous map man, who made all
the maps for General Grant and the Union
army, certificates of which he published, has
just invented a way of getting a relief plate
from steel so as to print Lloyd's Map of Amer
lean Continent-showing from ocean to ocean
-on one entire sheet of bank note paper, 40 K
so inches large, on lightning press, and col
ored sized and vanished for the wall 80 as to
stand washing, and mailing anywhere in the
world for 25 cents, or unvarnished for 10 cents.
This map shows the whole United States and
Territories in group, from surveys to 1875,
with million places on It, such as towns, viii
lagos, mountains, lakes, rivers, streams, gold
mines, railway stations, &c. This map should
be in every house. Send 25 cents to the Lloyd
Map Company, Philadelphia, and you will get
a copy by return mail.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
MARRrAGHs.

IoKEs-KEPNER.- the 10th inst, by Rev.
p. Sheeder, Mr.. William NJ Ickes, and Miss
Frances X. Kepner, both Of Plnegroye, this
county.
RHEHM-SMITH.-By the same on the 18th
inst, Mr.. David Rheem, of Greenpark, and
Miss Julia A. Smith, Of Milford, Perry CO., Pa.
HENoH-BRINER.-On the nth inst, at the
residence of the officiating Minister, by the
Rev. s. W. Selbert, Mr.. William M. Hench, to
Miss Emma Brlner, both Of Madison twp.
SHELLAHKnfER-ADAMs the 9th inst,
Mr.. Henry shellaheimer, of Mount Holly,
Cumberland county, TO Miss Maggie Adams,
Of Spring twp, Perry county, Pa.
KIRK-KILMRR.--On the 3rd inst., at Mat
tawana, by Rev. Geo. Hanawalt, Mr.. james
W. Kirk, Of East Waterford, and Miss Maggie
NJ. Kllner, near Mexico, Juniata county.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

r IsToF GRAND JURORS FOR JANUARY
IL TERM, 1875. tfh fh ne
Centre-1saiah G. Foose, John Shearer, ia
cob Hostetter, John Sanderson, John Ayle, and
Daniel julius
Liverpool twp-Theodoro 2. orner, Will
liam Deckard.
Toboyne-- Edward G. johnson, Job Hook
enberry.
Mlller--William Holmes, George Peterman.
Tuscarora-Isaiah Campbell.
Jackson-George Gntshall, David Kistler.
loomGeld-Willis Crist.
Penn--John Harper, Jr., Samuel shull.
Duncannon-John Graham.
Carroll--J. e. Burn, John II. Jones.
Madison-Henry Bair.
Tyrone.-David Wagner.
Greenwood-Lews Wagner.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
7 IsT OF TRAVERSE JURORS FOR
JANUARY TERM, 1874.

Il
Centre-Wm. II. KistIer, Isaac Holleubaugh,
Simon w. Clouser, John Lupfer, Simon s.
Clouser.
Madison-Henry Kline.
Millerstown-Samuel Baker, David Boiling
er, Thomas Haines.
Buffalo twp-Isaac Kroh, Jacob Buck.
Liverpool twp-Lewis Myers, Samuel Spi-
cher, William c. Lindsey, William Barger,
Jonas Noll.
Rye-G. B. Fink.
Carroll-Jacob sheafrer, William A. AL
bright, Levi SEeger.
Juuiata-Thomas benig.
Penn-John P. Steel, George Bruner, David
Blain.
Liverpool B.-samuel Deckard, William
Turner.
saville-George Ickes, John swartz, Simon
Kell.
Greenwood-simon II. Fry, A. w. Long,
Christian b. Liter.
Toboyne-Alexander Noe, Alexander Smith,
Robert Campbell.
Watts-Joseph Hamaker, Michael Shatto.
Tuscarora-W William l.. Jones, William A.
Blain.
Marysville-William A. Sheaffer.
Jackson-William s. Enslow, Andrew Tros-
tie, Sr.
Spring-Jacob r. Sheibley.
loomfeld-Henry Rice, Sr
Oliver-Jacob Kroh.
Newport-John Sheets.
Landisburg-John Burtnett.
Wheatfeld-Levi Ebersole.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

9sg- The New York Observer, published by
s. l. Prime g. Co., 81 Park Row, N. Y, comes
to us in an entire new dress, and is one of the
ablest, religious journals in the country. It is
metropolitan and comprehensive, and apart
from its peculiar religious views, abounds in
literary matter of the very highest order. Dr.
Prime, the principal editor, will be remember
cd as the writer of those remarkably interesting
European letters over the signature of "1ren-
eus," and the value which attached to them
has not in the least diminished in his cubse-
quent writings. 1t is not necessary to more
than allude to this excellent publication, how
ever, as its reputation is established wherever
American literature has name. Terms, post
paid, $3.15 two copies for $3.50.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

Cumberland County. From the Cum
berland county papers of last week, we
copy the following:
One day last week while Mr.. s. r. PETER,
of Dickinson twp, was returning home from
his brothers, he met with severe acci-
dent. The horse he was riding stumbled
and fell upon his leg breaking it near the
ankle.
On Monday of last week, Mr.. A. j. Nor
rison killed for Mr.. Asbury Derland, of
Boiling Springs, hog 28 months old,
which weighed $40 pounds clean meat
Live weight, 700 pounds. This is the
heaviest hog that has been killed in the
county this season.
One night last week, the premises Of Mr..
Henry Wolf, wagon-maker, on North Han
over street, were entered by nocturnal
providers, who carried off twenty-five chick
ems from the poultry house. Not being
satisfied with their booty, the invaders
paid a second visit to the place, and made
clean sweep, taking feathers and all,
making in all thirty-eight chickens stolen
in the two nights. Mr.. Wolf had gone to
some trouble to prepare trap near the
coop, hoping thereby that the thieves
might be frightened off, but it was of no
avail Llh ID some Oh inc DOlu6bb JnleVl0g
we have ever heard Of
We learn that most distressing and
fatal occident occurred, on Monday last, at
Krider's Mill, situated on the COnodogui-
net, near Plainheld, and in West Penns-
boro' township, this county. The particu-
lars, as near as we can ascertain them, are
that Mr.. Simon Mayberry, the miller, was
engaged in oiling the machinery ON the
upper floor of the mill when il is supposed
that his clothing caught in two small cog
wheels and the unfortunate man became
entangled in the machinery. An appren-
tice ON the lower floor, noticing the slip
ping of the cogs, at once ran up stairs to
see what caused the incorrect working Of
the machinery when most horrible sight
met his gaze--the mangled aud lifeless re-
mains Of Mr.. Mayberry. The boy at once
stopped the machinery and alarmed the
neighbors who, with great difficulty, ex-
tricated the unfortunate man. His body
was almost severed below the ribs and a
terrible cash back Of the left ear was dis
covered bnt, strange 10 say, no bones were
broken, Mr.. Mayberry had been miller at
this mill shout fifteen or twenty gears a
sober and, Industrious man, and Respected
by all who knew him. He was about 40
years OF age, and leaves wife and two
children to mourn his untimcly end,
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
IO CONSuMPTIVES.

The advertiser having been permanently cured
OF that dread disease, Consumption, by a simple
remedy, Is anxious to make known 20 his fellow
sufferers the means Of cure To all'whO desire II,
he will send copy OF the prescription used, (free
using the same which they will md sUBH CURE
for CONsubfPTloN, ASTHMA, l3RoRolIIIIs, &c.
Parties wishing Che PRESCRIPTION Will please ad
4sa8m 1874 Penn ST., Willlamsburgh, N. X
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
Church Notices.

Presbyterian Church-Preaching during
the winter months at II A, NJ, and p.
NJ, every Sabbath, and Prayer meeting on
Wednesday evenings at o. o'clock.
Sunday, at 10 A. NJ. Prayer meeting on
Thursday evening.
Preaching In the Lutheran church next
Saturday evening at o. o'clock.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

HIghwaymen.-About eleven o'clock on
the night of the 3rd inst, whilst Mr.. VIM.
Galbraith was on his way home from Bir-
mingham to Sinking Valley, he was con-
fronted by three unknown villains in the
bridge between birmingham aud the Pa,
r. r. depot. They demanded that he sur
render to them the horse ON which he was
riding. He made desperate resistance,
and during the struggle he was stabbed
in the right side, fortunately, however,
not seriously. Depredations Of this kind
are said to be of quite frequent occurrence
in that vicinity. Huntingdon Monitor.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

XTICK'S FLORAL GUIDE FOR 1S75.-Publish.
ed Quarterly.-January number Just issued,
and contains over 100 pages, 500 engTavngs, de.
and VEGETABLES, with directions for Culture,
Colored Plate, etc-The most useful and elegant
work OF the Kind in the world Only rs cents for
the year.--Published in English and German.
Address,
JAMES WICK, Rochester, N. Y.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

To Exchange. "A desirable farm in Fish
ing Creek Valley, Perry county, Pa, to
exchange for a dwelling house in either
Marysville, Duncannon or Newport. No
incumbrance on farm. Price SO, 500 For
further Information apply to a
JAMES ORR,
New Bloomfield, Perry county, Pa.
November "a, 1874, 8tA
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

4 A Heavy SnOw.-On Sunday morning the
ground in this vicinity, was found to be
well covered with snow, which was then
rapidly falling. All day long it came
down fast, and by five o'clock when the
storm seemed to be over, fully 10 inches of
snow was on the ground.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

la II is useless to attempt to cleanse a
stream while the fountain is impure. Dyspep-
sla, complaints of the liver and kidneys, erup-
tlons of the skin, scrofula, headaches, and all
diseases arising from impure blood, are at once
Bitters, purl6er of the blood, and renovator Of
the System. II has never been known to
fail. 4S At
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

The Weekly Witness, published at New
York, is the cheapest religious weekly we
have yet seen. Although the subscription
price is only $1,2O per year, the paper com
pares favorably both in size and editorial
ability, with any of the religious journals
in the country. We don't see how the pub
fishers affords such paper for the price
asked, but it is done somehow.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

DR.. d. II. Sweeney, at New Bloomfield,
Pa, in his treatment Of diseases of the
Lungs, Throat, Heart, Nasal Cavities and
Ears, uses the approved treatment of En-
lightened Physicians of the present age.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

The Report of the proceedings had at the
Teachers Institute will be found complete
on the 2nd page. .
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
GEN . porh $ribn"e.
1875.
1875.
CHEAPER AND BETTER THAN EVER.

To all former subscribers to THE WEEKLY
TRIBUNE whose names have not been on its
books since January !, 1873 the paper, II ordered
now, will be sent until January !, 1875 (thirteen
months(, postage paid, for So; Or in Clubs at the
yearly Club rates. Persons not familiar with THE
WEEKLY TRIBUNE, orfOrmer subscribers who may
be uncertain about its present standing and mer-
its, are invited TO take 1t short time on trial
Any one may order 1t between now and the LIST OF
February next, for one two, or three months at
the rate Of TEN CENTS PER MONTH; and this
after the LIST OF January, pOstage-paid.
In future, NO EXTRA CHARGE viii be made
for addressing papers to each member OF club
and pOst-masters who desire it, will receive pack
ages with each paper addressed to Its owner at
the lowest prce-practlcally a reduction of Thirty
Cents year from the previous lowest club. rates:
After Jan. l, 1876 the Postage on all editions OF
THE TRIBUNE will be paid by office Without
Charge to the subscriber. The WEEKLY TRIBUNE
thus becomes to subscribers THE CHEAPEST,
as il has long been the best, paper published.
Agents wanted in every town
Rs- Address for specimen copies posters and
rates OF commission,
THE TRIBUNE,
so At w&cl NEW YORK.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
NO CUTS INSERTED.

No Cut Stereotype will be inserted in this paper
unless light face and on metal base
fp Twenty per cent in Of regular rates, will
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

DIR. Sweeney, of New Bloomfield, Pa,
can be consulted as usual on all Chronic
diseases, requiring skillfnl medical treat
ment or delicate and difficult Surgical OPP
Grafton for their cure.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
DMATEr@.

DARLINGToN.- the S0th ult,, near La
porte, Indiana, Mr.. Samuel Darlington, for
merly Of Perry county, aged 90 years, 10 mos.
aud u days. .Tfsfala liaI sia3 fi
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

t8r We would call attention to the sale of
Levi II. Swartz, to take place on the Sth of jan
uary, near Evansville. Three horses, 1 COW,
l bull, wagon and many other articles, will
be sold.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22

tag- Ask your druggist for Pain Cure Oil.
It cures all pain, costs but trihe TO get 1t, and
when once used you win never be without it..
40 For sale by Z. MORTIMER, New Bloom
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-12-22
Brief Items.

q On Saturday evening week, a bench
broke down during service at Young's
Church, in Carroll twp, and suddenly de-
posted number of young men on the
floor.
A Grand Reunion of the Philomathean
Literary Society, will be held at Bloomfield,
on Christmas evening dec. 25tb). The
public is invited to attend. BY order of the
committee. WILSON UPPER, Chairman.
A reading club has been formed by the
colored men of Shippensburg, and they
hold regular meetings every week, in one of
the school rooms, in the "White Church"
DIR. Cisna, of Ickesburg, delivered lee
ture before the Teachers Institute in Milf
flintown last week, which is highly COM
mended.
Don't you come again. Those two
chickens you took on Saturday night from
our coop, we will forgive you for, stealing,
as the pistol failed to go off. Next time,
we'll make sure work Of it, however, will
you mind that now?
Saville twp, has got stirred up again,
judging from the very emphatic language
we heard two of the citizens using in front
of lawyers Office last week. Illegal
whiskey caused the trouble.
A lot of black Alpaccas, from auction,
very cheap at f. Mortimer's. Come and
see them.
Christmas services, on Christmas eve
! dec. 24th) in the Reformed church, by
the Sunday School, at 81 p. M. The SER
vices will embrace the promises of the
Savior, and their fulfllment to the second
advent. An arrangement has been made
for prepared scene, of the birth Of Jesus.
The church will be decorated, and the pub
lie are invited to attend. Admission 1C
cents.
On last Friday morning, while the hands
were casting at Marshall Furnace, the
roof of the casting house took fire from the
sparks, and before the flames could be
checked, the roof was burnt off. No more
casting could be done until new roof was
put on ; but heavy force was put to work
in repairing the damage, and in very
short time the work was completed and the
furnace is going on again as well as ever
NeUs.
! Persons who ride behind horse belong
ing to Mr.. Grier, in this borough, have
custom of getting out of the buggy in &
very sudden manner. On Tuesday last the
barber, who considers himself somewhat Of
a horseman, thought he would show how
easily that horse could be managed. One
minute by the watch, was all the time il
took him to go across the square and ge
out of the vehicle. The hostler who wa
with him, got out very shortly afterwards
and fortunately neither was hurt.