Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1874-06-04
MRS. SLIPPERKIN'S FAMILY.
BY CLARA C. DOLLIYER.

BY CLARA C. DOLLIyER.
Mrs Slipperkin is eight years old; Just
eight, too, although, when she is asked,
she takes pains to say that she will be
nine her next birthday. 1t is harmless
delusion Of Mrs. Slipperkin's that such a
statement makes her seem considerably
older, while it has the advantage of being
strictly true.
Mr.. Slipperkin is said to be travelling in
Europe, and his wife sometimes receives
small letters bearing a foreign post-mark,
which she says are from her husband.
But, on examining these letters closely,
we are Of the opinion that the only part
which has seen the pOstOffice is the stamp;
and we have frequently remarked to Mrs.
Slipperkin that her husband writes hand
resembling her own in a most surprising
degree; we think, but do not say, that the
letters are fat, and the is and is neg
lected
She lives with her dear friend her sis
ter, in fact, though she does not usually
call her sO-Mrs. Coppertip, in our at
tic.
This latter lady is ski beg her par
don, will be seven her next biTthday-and
she also has a husband travelling in
foreign lands. Mr.. Coppertip, however,
does not attend to his family as he should,
for his wife has received but one letter
from him, and that was written on a
piece Of an old writing book, in hand
strongly resembling Mrs. Slipperkin's
and not written in her best style
Mrs. Coppertip is one Of the gentlest of
human beings. She has little, soft hands,
which are often cool and kind on aching
heads; she has gentle brown eyes, and
soft brown hair Djan hr1ch aT1
very easy to care for. l believe she loves
everybody, and l am quite sure that every
body loves her, because know they can
not help it.
Mrs. Slipperkin's eyes are likewise
brown, but they have more snap in them
than Mrs. Coppertip's, Her hair, too, is
brown, and very pretty, being full of
snarly curls, which she loves, but which
are quite dreadful to brush. 1 know she
doesn't love everybody, for she goes to
school, and have heard her say that she
hates" Laura Brown, and " despises"
Amelia Lake, and "can't endure" some
bods else; and so we judge from this that
Laura and Amelia and somebody else do
not love Mrs. Slipperkin, either.
Mrs. Coppertip has three children,
all Of whom have been extremely unfOr
tunate
| One has lost an arm, another both legs,
and the youngest, shocking to say, once
1ost her head, which was afterward found,
and is now very insecurity fastened on
with white wax.
In spite Of their misfortunes they are
very still and we'll behaved, and their
mother loves them dearly. She does not
believe in dressing them too finely; she
| does not think it is good for children to
| 1Do +o1 III
! then, besides-this is between ourselves
she is not much Of a sewer, and really
finds it impossible to put many stitches in
their dresses; so they are made OF calico,
and all the embroidery is done with the
scissors.
When her youngest child, Evelina, was
| baptized she attempted little more, and
actually hemmed the skirt of her dress
all around; but every stitch was marked
by drop of blood, where the cruel, sharp
needle pricked the patient little finger,
| and L counted three great big stains on 1t,
caused by the fall of three great big tears.
| The Slipperkin children, on the con-
trary, are always decked out III the finest
of clothes.
I cannot positively state that Mrs. Slip
perkin is fond of sewing, for we have to
quote the old saying, "a stitch In time
| saves nine," great many times IN the
course Of a year. But though she can
endure rents in her own dresses with per-
feet calmness, yet she must dress her chill
| dren well or be wretched.
If the sewing will not bear inspection
/ can affirm positively that the long
stitches are all on the under side.
| She says, with great pride: " My chill
dren haven't got one calico dress to their
! names-sOP'
"How many children have you, Mrs.
Slipperkin ?" said particular friend OF
hers to her one day.
"Three, and baby" was the answer;
but why the baby, poor innocent! is not
called child, have been unable to dis
cover.
The only difference I can perceive be-
tween it and the remainder of the family
is that it wears long clothes; and as 1t
has lost both legs, always supposed that
long clothes were a necessity.
Mrs. Slipperkin has brother Joe, a
big boy, who wears cowhide boots, which
make a perfectly fearful noise; and he
has no conception OF the sort OF thing a
headache is, never having had one HIM
self.
The two ladies wanted Joe to take the
house next to them in the attic, adopt a
family, which they offered to give him
"for nothing" and call himself Mr.. ot.
Clair, whose wife had recently died:
But Joe said it was girls play" and
wouldn't try it after the first day Then
he took the plaster ofParis children
poor infants and fed them to his chick
ems.
Some of the boys heard of his new
name, and he was greeted with perlect
yell the next morning when he went INTO
the school-yard. At first he did not know
what they were saying. but when ne real
lied that they were calling him MI. OF.
Clair he laid about him with his hsts 10
the right and left, though without any
signal success. He received seven notes
that day, addressed, in large, crooked,
boys letters, Mr.. Joe St. Clair," and the
next day the number increased to twelve
and then, having stood it as long as he
could, Joe thought it quite time that
something was done.
} So, during the geography class, he
printed on a piece of paper the word AT.
TENTIoNl in the largest letters he could
make, not at all sparing the ink.
| Then ar rapess-tirna when there was a