The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1874-03-12

AT this pint Issaker'5 wife came in,
and wanIid Issaker To go and get
some rice, and then go home and
sDlit some wood. Issaker wantid to
know wat she came there for, and the
unreasonable woman bustid into tears
AMI sed she couldn't split wood, with
no shOes and three inches Nv snow
on the ground, aud that there wuzn't
thing in the house for the sick baby
to eat, and eff IssSker wood spend half
the time At work that he did lOatin at
BascOm's, and half the money OH his
children that lie did for likker, and
ISsaker didn't allow her to finish
her unreasonable harangue. He took
her by the shoulder and showed her
out the door, and swOre that he didn't
know how it wuz in Ohio and IDjeany
but he'd be d. il in Kentucky wO-
man shOOdent keep in her proper
spear. he wuzn't gOin to allow no
woman to dictate To him wat he
ShOOd do with his time or his money,
nuther.
CAptin McPeiter remsrkt that ef his
wife ever jined in sich q demOnstra-
shun she'd wish she hadn't. His vile
tried to stop him from takin another
drink wunst. after he felt his oats and
he'd thrOwd q cradle with y six
months baby out Nv the door, and the
black eye she got wuZ 3 Warnln to her
never to interfere with his preroga.
tives no more.
Poor BascOm wuz cast down. He
sed Amerikin liberty wuz gone,
when a passel Nv wimmen got to gOin
about interferin with a mans biznis.
But he shOod adopt vigorous meas
ures. He'd never surrender-never.
Friday come aud B4scom wuz ready
for em. Evry wun NV our persuasion
in the Corners he'd ordered his wife TO
keep strickIy in doors, and on no ak
kOunt to veneher out dOOrin the day.
BascOm asked US ali to stay with him,
and see him thrO it. To wieh we all
agreed. Them ez wuz married and
kept house, went home to fix up ther
doors and nail boards over the broken
glass Nv ther winders, so that ther
Nimmen shOOdn't see outside. It's
no small matter to close up all the
holes in the houses At the Corn
/ ers.
Well, at IL O'Clock u percessiOn Nv
women did make its appearance at
the lower end Nv the village, and they
moved up slowly tO'ards BascOm's.
G.. w. wuZ eZ pale eZ sheet.
swat shel do ?" asked he.
thing 700 700 kin do. RaIIy yoor friends
about 700, and make head sgin this
unhO,y erOOsade. The regular fire.
quenters of the place are friends and
are not here. Bring em here Bring
EN- here to-Wunst Swing out y
placard Wich shel read
"Likker free to all! doOrin the con-
tinyOOance Nv this fanAtikle cam
pane !-Ho all ye that thirst Come
and drink, without money and with
out price,"
"fhis, G. w. will fetch EN- in, and
ez long ez the likker is free they will
stay in, and give yoo their moral sup
port. Shel write the placard ?"
G. w. wsvered. He cast one glance
at his kegs, and sighed hesitatingly.
cast one glance at them kegs and
wuz determined that 50 good an Op-
pOrtOonity shOOd not be lost.
"Ha ~ sed /, ''the foe! they come
they eOmeI To hesitate nov rs To be
lost. The head Nv the invadin
column hez turned the corner. Shell
write %
"Yesr sed Bascom, Dustin into
teers "write. Ell they shet me up
Pm rOOined, and ef you hev free
drinks I'm bustid. But Pd ruther
take the free drinks part Of it,"
Certainly" sed Issaker GavittY
soothingly ''free drinks, by all
means. After all, BaseOm, it amounts
to the same thing. It's free drinks
anyhow, for 700 hey to charge en- to
US, don't yOO?"
And so = writ the plaeard and his
ted it up at the door. The result WuZ
majical. In less than ten minits the
glad nOoze had reached every house
in the village, and there wuZ gathered
| together in Bascom's sich q solid mass
NV liberty-lovin men eZ he'd never
been seen together at the Cross Roads.
BascOm appinted two Nv Us to draw
Iikker for the thirsty crowd, and then
We thrOwd open the doors, calkilatin
| to greet EN- with sich cheers ez would
effeetOOnally silence all the singin
and prayin they could do.
| The WimmiD approached. We
Good see em. They Wuz all closely
vailed. Ez they approached the door /
directed the likker to be served out
faster, so sz to get the boys tuned up
TO the right pitch. But alas! they
didn't stop 1hey didn't stop to sing
] or to pray or nnthin. They simply
passed by, pulling their yails elosertO
/ their faces, and snickerin. ] looked
thro the vail Nv one Nv EN- and saw
whiskers.
But with rare presence Nv mind 1
sed nOthin.
ifDraw more Iikker!" I shouted,
f'they will be back in q moment"
/ By the time this drink wuZ down
/ Bascom was so far gone that he didn't
know nuthin. He got Iunatic, and
springin from the counter insisted on
/ everybody's not only drinkin, but
that every man Nv US shOOd ill bot
/ tie and take it with US.
/ 1t is unnecessary to state what fol-
lered. The Tevelry waxed furious,
and by night the bodies nv the fallen
were piled on top Nv each other four
deep. Eyry drop nv likker in the
house WuZ gone, for wat wuZn'J
drank he'd bin allowed to waste, for
/ men drawd it who wuZ too tite to
/ to shet the faucets. BAseOm wuZ laid
out, Deekin POgram wuz snOrin eZ
I tho he hedn't slept for q week, and j,
seasoned vessel that am, wuz the
Wust played out nv any NV EN-.
The next mornin Joe Bigler vench-
cred around, and / asked him con-
eernin the win
"WiminI" sed be "them wuz' mt vim
in. They wuz boys employed in the
faetrys in new Boston. Nasty" sed
he eonfidenshly, "my op;nyun is that
cuss, Pollock, put this up on 700,
with a view To roOinin BsseOm.
heerd him talkin with one Of them
faetry men, who is his brother-in-Is",
and I heerd the brotber-in-IaW 9ays
that it wuz too good not to do u
presume this IS wat they refeIreu TO-
But don't say that told yOO."
| Passin POIlOck's an hour alter,
heeri him and Bigler 3 laffin vOeifer-
ouslv. and knOwd that this wuZ wat
they wuZ laf1in at.
| But, thank Heaven, the joke isn't
onto me. got twenty square drinks
out NV it for nothing. But do pity
BascOm. His heart is broke. His
empty barrels, his broken glasses and
bottles, bear mute {. stimOny to his
losses. May Heaven forgive Pollock
and Bigler.
PETROLEUM v. Massey, P. NJ.
P. 81 shell isboO the first number
Nv my new paper next week.