The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-08-01
NEW NoR,-wEsTERs.
Noah was the first arkitect.

NEW N0R'-WESTERS.
Noah was the first arkitect.
Goldsmith Maid is II years old
"A good square meal-A soda-cracker.
Collins Graves has gone to hoeing pota-
toes.
Stokes is allowed to have carpet in
his cell.
The Dane is the longest lived of all
Europeans.
Boss Tweed's palace has gone under
the hammer.
--"Clay Spencer, colored: pint of Mem
phis whisky"
Oshkosh has woman who is now in
her 104th year.
Colorado teamsters grease their wagons
with printers ink.
The horse's hoof is simply boot to
ssroteet his foot.
-Schurz is Tapping in the breeze of Mar
ragausett Pier, r. l.
"A re-case-Very often the case when
one meets a pretty girl on it.
"A phllanthropist proposes to muzzle
the boys during green apple season.
-Barnum has lost sea lion. It weighed
1900 pounds, and cost those figures in
money.
Boston sent 1000 books to Iceland by
DR.. Hayes as gift at her thousandth cele-
bration.
-''Now is the time for roasting ears"
writes rural editor. He should carry
sun umbrella.
Josh Billings says "there is two things
in this life for which we are never prepared,
and that is twins"
Thousands of poor men are spending as
much for newspapers as would bay a good
mint julep every day.
The Lantern. the newspaper just start
ed in London, claims to be the first news
paper printed in six colors."
1t is easy enough for the St. Louis pa
pers to predict that the new bridge will last
200 years, and then say ''wait and see."
--Keokuk has been tossing pennies to a
hand-organ man, who owns $15, 900 farm
in Wisconsin, and feels bad about it,
Rhode Island can't ballot for Senator
any more unless the State rents some land
in Massachusetts to stow away waste bal
lots.
r. NJ. Douglas, a son of the "Little
Giant, was married recently to a daughter
of Judge Dick, of Greensboro, North Caro-
lima.
--Gen. Beauregard has accepted the po-
sition of Chief Engineer of the Argentine
Republic, at salary of $25, 900 a year in
gold.
People will still call the Emperor of
bn R11t cinpa fbo do VIC
of Peter the Great his official title has been
Emperor.
There is place OF pure delight.
Where chiuch bugs never pest,
And not wave of trouble rolls
Across the grangers breast
1T is estimated that is takes domesti-
Gated fly a two-bilionth part of n second to
wink, while an industrious mosquito can do
it in one-tenth of the time.
The Emperor of Germany sleeps in a
narrow iron beadstead, with mattresses and
pillows even harder than those used by the
common people i'll Germany.
We are constantly told that "the even
ing wore on" but what the evening wore
ON such occasions we are not informed.
Was it the close of a summers day?
An editor at dinner table, being asked
if he would take some pudding, replied in a
fit of abstraction 'Owing to crowd of
other matter. we are unable TO find room
for it,
The Washington correspondent of the
Chicago Tribune predicts Senator Thur
man S nomination for President by the DEM
ocrats. and Speaker Blaine's nomination by
the Republicans.
Wars, comets, pestilence, and topping
dvn1cfioc may fill tho World with xppndpp .
but nothing goes down to the marrow of a
mans soul so much as the announcement
of his baby's first tooth.
The story that Walt Whitman is about
to lose his clerkship i'll Washington moves
since it supposes that he will now devote
himself entirely to writing poetry.
A Ripley (Ohio, reporter says "With-
out exaggeration, it is almost impossible to
get glass of liquor in this place. And an
exchange propounds the conundrum: "Well.
what is little exaggeration to q man who
is dry p
1t is so hot down in Texas that they
want to die, and they sing
"Shoot me dead with crowbar.
Stab me TO death with hoe
Batter my brains with sunfiowei.
And get me rid of this woe
Holland, with it's 3,515. 316 we'll educa-
ted inhabitants, has 1904 booksellers, 367
hand-press printers and SO printers by
steam 15S paper manufacturers and whole
sale paper dealers, 81 bookbinders, 81 music
sellers, 48 printsellers and ten man and
chart publishers.
Nothing has yet been heard of the
Austrian expedition which started for the
Polar seas in tire Tegethoff two years ago.
The Cronstadt Messenger requests all trav-
elers and seamen who may have learned any
news about the expedition to communicate
it to the Foreign Office at Vienna, or to the
Admiralty at st. Petersburg.
Gable dispatch from Uncle Sam to the
Emperor of China: Gorgeous Brother of
the Sun, Celestial Uncle of the Moon, and
stupendous Grandfather of the Stars Your
fire-crackers playedell here yesterday-the
Glorious Fourth. Permit no more to be
shipped to me, or I'll come around there
| and whip enough dog out of you to make a
full pack of hounds. Ever of thou. Z. S.
"A dilapidated-loo being, with a
handkerchief tied over his eye, q straw hat
| dangling in shreds about his ears, the back
of his vest split from buckle 30 neck, his
| lacerated knees peering out through his
| disjointed pantaloons, one arm in a sling,
and heavy stick supporting his trembling
limbs, appeared on Market Square yester-
| day. Everybody rushed up to hear about
the explosion, but this wreck Of humanity.
turned his gashed and bleeding face upon
the crowd. said in tremulons but hopeful
tones Gentlemen, you don't none of you
want to buy number one team of green
mules, runnin', do you?'' They didn't
Darlington Haukeye.
Type.