The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1874-10-03
NUMBER 4
Laughing Gas.

t4s AAsOAS
talk.
A highly intellectual dog -the type
setter.
A man who has no mind will not
change it.
Job boiled over when his patience
gave way.
Forse thieves in Texes are serena
ded by string bands.
A polite way of putting it: Troub-
led with chronic indisposition to ex-
ertion.
Eight Connecticut young ladies
have just taken the veil. They were
hopelessly freckled.
When a Maryland doctor spells it
accufortus is it any wonder that
patient dies on his hands?
A small boy forgot and asked his
father for '.chaw Nv tubaccer, " the
other day, and is now very reticent.
on the subject.
An actress in California, Miss
Kinlin, lately married a professional
named Wood, and her stage name is
now hyphenated into Nine. Kinlin-
Wood.
els the candidate for sheriff here I"
asked stranger as he looked into an
Illinois bar-room. Yes, why I" an
swered eighteen men, as they rose.
An Omaha paper advises the people
6 not to make such fuss about the
shooting of one constable, as there are
over forty candidates for the Office"
Two Rochester men rowed boat
around in circle for three hours un-
der the idea tina: they were going
down the bay, and yet Rochester is a
temperance town.
Now is the time when the irrespon-
slble urchin glueth the house fly's
wings together and walketh him
against time around the nose Of his
sleeping grandfather.
An Alabama paper states that the
hogs in Walker county, in that State,
are dying Of disease Of the brain.
They ought to keep their hogs from
studying SO hard then.
Last year he was worth $500, 600.
Then he began to drink whiskey aud
seltzer, and now he's a pauper. Where
these ravages of seltzer are going to
cease the. most prescient of us can not
tell.
The Detroit Free Press man has
just returned from Saratoga. He says:
!" The Saratoga bellies merely taste
food at Che table, but fee the walters
to bring a square meal up the back
stairs"
When a well-known Omaha thief
meets policeman and hands him five
dollars, it is the duty of the officer to
go and sit down in an alley and see
nothing for the next hour--nothing
but the five dollars.
The Chief of Police of Knoxville.
wears three diamond studs, diamond
pin and diamond ring, and the
Knoxville papers are just mean
enough to want to know how he got
,'em on a salary of 5000 per year.
When the Arkansas census-taker
next goes around he will find Peter
Dayton missing from earth. The old
man found package and threw it on
to the fire to see if it was powder or
sand. 1t wasn't sand.
"Queer people, those Kansas, says
the Cleveland Herald. They get
rid of man who borrows a horse in
an hours time, and yet it takes them
over year to make up their minds
how to dispose of a man who buys up
legislature.
It seems like a waste of time to
spend five years at West Point for
the purpose of acquiring the title of
lieutenant, when boy can be called
colonel" by simply addressing l.
few words to any thirsty congregation
in a bar-room.
A New York politician, in writing
Il letter of coincidence to the widow Of
a late member of the Legislature,
says: "I can not tell you how panied
| was to hear that your husband had
gone to Heaven. We were bosom
friends, but now we shall never meet
again."
Party politics are ignored in Ne
vada," wrote the editor of the Star
Spangled Banner. His intelligent com
positor set it up, "Party politicians
are ignorant. The editor got mad,
but the subscribers want TO promote
the compositor to the post of editor
in-cliief for his knowledge of the sit
uation.
1t will be something like nine thou
sand years before coggia's comet
faunts its I" horrid hair " in these re-
gions again, aud perhaps by that time
the average Chicago woman will have
learned better manners than to prop
her feet mp on the horizon, and pre-
vent people seeing the celestial wan
derer.
An old gentleman went into the of
fee Of one of the papers in st. John,
n. b., the other day, and presenting
a slip cut from London paper an
nouncing the death of person we'll