Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1874-08-01
SAYING AND DOINGS.

CAPT. FRYs widow has started O
WOO yard in New Orleans. She mum
bers her friends in that city by The
cords
The number Of Jews in Jerusalem ct
the present time is said to be $4,000,
thus forming more than half of the en-.
TIRE pOpuiaJtOH.
IT is shrewdly observed tina! sawdu8t
pills would cure q great many diseases
if the patient would only make his own
sawdust.
ESTHER SHAW, Of Davenport, Iowa,
worked thirteen years in one family be-
fore asking for cent of pay. Needn't
write for her ; she's dead.
A RETURNING emigrant wagon passed
through Cedar Falls, Iowa, last week,
bearing the expressive and euphOnious
label, "D-n the grasshoppers.
A CNcINSATI boarding-school girl,
while induIging with her companions
in the amusement of kicking at a mark
the other day, dislocated her thigh
joint.
/ CoySEcrIcUT loses $500 sheep every
year by dogs, but if it wasn't for a
spotted dog under the buggy who
would take any pleasure in driving
out?
They can't aglee IN Denver how long
/ the blade of a bowie-knife should be, so
that you see all communities have a
skeleton in the closet, and no town can
expect to be perfectly happy.
TEyNYsoNIAY, MORE OR LESS
Low ore her brow she pastes her hair,
Down euryiug to her Grocian nose
Her frizze- once her fondest care,
Are wilted as a last years rose.
LAxDLADY lfercely)-" You must
not occupy that bed with your boots
on /" Boarder. 60 never mind,
they're only an old pair. The bed
bugs can't hurt EN-. I'll risk it, any
| how"
/ Ten years from now Germany expects
( to be able to put into the field trained
army of one million six hundred men.
This, for a country that has no Indian
war on hand, will be rather enterprising
Ir is estimated that it costs the peo.
pie of the United States S5,OOO,OOO
yearly to keep their teeth in repair. All
the consequence of drinking ice water,
which, say the dentists, cracks the en-
amel.
TURN for moment from the Baecher
scandal and ponder over the fact that
the footprints OF a Chicago lady on
the prairie near Michigan city got a
erowed of men out to hunt for a stray
elephant.
"WHAr DO you know of the character
of this man ?' was asked Of witness at
a police-court the other day. What
do know of his character 1 know it
to be unbleachable, your honor" he
replied with much emphasis.
WHEN an Indian chief Gomez down
to making ak handles and selling them
at eleven cents apiece, as the case
with Big Wolf, Of Nevada, it's time to
chip in for monument to Cooper and
Longtellow.
OSE reason why Wisconsin hired girls
get four dollars per week is because
they have to go down stairs at midnight
to investigate strange noises, while the
man Of the house takes up n position
under the bed.
"DEsERrED by all but his aged bob
tailed dog, lis life went slowly out as
the shadows of the setting sun crept
over the front stoop of Darling's gro
cery," is the way they express them
selves in Georgia.
WE'LL, Johnney, how are you getting
on? How do you like your new mas
ter?' "Faith, Miss, I dunno" He's
very excellent man; you can't do too
much for him." AN sure, Miss, l
don't name to"
AUNT BELLA who has just read aloud
"The burial Of Sir John Moore v
"Now, then, which of the verses do
Won like best p Jack with alacrity)- )--
i'Oh l know Few and short were
the prayers we said.
BECAUSE a st. Louis paper said some
thing about "the boot of public indig-
nation, the jealous Louisville Courior-
Journal must go and say: "On st.
Louis foot such boot would be cap
able of kicking the stuffing out OF q
range of mountains.
A serpent saw an eagle gain,
On soaring wing, mountain height,
And enyied him. and crawled with pain
To where he was the bird aligh..
So fckle fortune ofteutimes
Befriends the cunning and the base,
And oft the groyeling reptile climbs
Up to the eagles lofty place.
One Mellen Cross, who mystoriously
disappeared from Maine lunatic
asylum, and on whose alleged skeleton
local coroner held an entirely salts
factory inquest, has turned up as an
eremitic resident of Deer Island, in
Boston harbor, and the provoked coro-
ner aforesaid observes that no one but
mailman would go off and leave his
skeleton behind him.
AT recent prayer meeting of colored
people at Erie, the decency and good
order of the meeting being disturbed by
negro named Brown, whose prayers in
public we're only incoherent rawlings, the
pastor inquired: "What fool nigga s
dat prayin' down dar nea' de do A
dozen people replied with one voice
at am Brudder Brown, sab. "Den,
replied the pastor, Brudder Brown
subside, and let some one pray dat's
= better 'dainted wild de Lord"
, A COLONY of such men as the late
! Simon Sturges, of Allentown, Pa, sent
, into a state where the female portion
= of the populations out numbers the
! males six to one, might accomplish 9
great deal. "He had been married
four times, the weddings having been
a on his fortieth, tiftieth, sixtieth and
!, seyentieth birthdays. His last wife
4 was dead, too, and it is likely that, had
! MIR. Sturges lived another year, he
! would have celebrated his eightieth
: birthday in the accustomed style, be-
/, cause the local paper says he was a
: very methodical old man"
SOME time since gentleman was
travelling ON a railway train that had
but one passenger.coach attached. The
gentleman is addicted to the bad habit
3 of smoking. He hal but one cigar at
! The time. and longed for smoke, but
hesitated, thinking that smoke might DC
unpleasant to fascinating lady passen'
ger-the only one aboard. Finally ne
could endure the deprivation no longer
. ond taking mt the cigar and reaching