The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1874-08-14
Glcanings.

Glcanings.
"A Maud Muller laughed heartily nj a
young hay maker when yellow Jackets
got up his nankeen trousers. Bnt when
they got up he'rn, twas no Joke.
When any of the royal family of Tur.
key is ailing the doctor Is walked In and
cheerfully informed that II he docsn't
hash. INV
The buzzards Of the old Washington
IIing are getting the fat contracts under
the new Commission, all of which shows
that the scepter of Boss Shepherd is not
broken.
|, The editor of a religious paper is mad
because he undertook to state that Mr..
Spurgeon. in his Sword and Trowel.
said so and so, and the printer called il
Shirt and Towel.
A Western Postmaster writes 10 the
Postmastcr-General "that hell will no
full OF country Postmasters before lono
II they do not get more pay than is al.
lowed this office.'
A Brooklyn Young woman. wbo
abandoned her old husband. saws. ala
was too soft. l couldn't be hugging and
Kissing him all the while-it isn't NV
disposition. couldn't bear 10 be Oh
liged to sit on his lap and cuddle him
every time i want cent
The Philadelphia Ledger doesn't write
any obituary poetry for children outside
of Philadelphia. This is the style in
which II mentions the death of a small
boy of Lowell: Saturday,
Two little boys and a pistol. Now. only
one little boy and pistol"
A correspondent of the New York
Times asks humbly for instruction in re-
gard to the pronunciation of the word
depot. We can never stand deepot:
doesn't like deppo, and thinks perbaps
the popular pronunciation, deepo, is
about as near right as we can get Il. A
it Is French word, why not call il day-
po, as they do, instead Of compromising
on decpo?
A young lady stopping in Brattleboro
for q few days, sent friend of hers to
the store to get pair Of shoes. She told
her friend to get number fives, but her
friend, being anxious to secure good
fit for her, ordered the storekeeper to
change the marks OH pair of seveps.
He did so, and the lady said they fitted
better than any she had had for a long
time.
Something, nobody knows what, has
killed all the fish in Washoe Lake. The
shore is piled with the bodies, and the
surface of the water is covered with
them. The lake is described as looking
clear and pure, and no mills poison it.
The pelicans, gulis and other fish-cating
fowls which have abounded thereabout
have left. The only explanation advance
ed by the settlers is that there has been
Jan eruction Of some kind of dcleterious
gas from the bottom of the lake.
In view of the new theory of the sci
entists that tho feelings are not located
i'm one particular spot but are distributed
over the whole frame, the Boston Tran
script thinks the love-letter of the future
will read something like this: "Dear-
est, believe me, do love you with my
whole nervous organism. You share
with no other being the emotions which
pervade my undivided gray matter. aud
if l were conscious of a ganglon that
throbbed but for thee, be sure would
not sleep till i had procured its neurot-
omy."
That surprising Detroit Justice re-
marked to fighter, the other day: This
affair will wrench ten dollar bin from
You unless you want to go up for ninety
days. BE careful how you sling vour
fists around after this. John &. Heenan
gained something Of reputation by
blowing his muscle up, but public opin-
ion has changed. Ii you want to be IA
Imous you must discover a comet. or
hang around reservoir and look ont
for breaks"
A teacher, wishing to improve the oc.
casion, said 10 the boys ut the conclusion
Iof strawberry festival: "IIave YOU
enjoyed these berries today" ayes,
SIR came from all sides, with unmistak-
able heartincss. "Well, children, if Won
had seen these berries growing i'm nv
garden, and had slipped in through the
gate without my leave, and picked them
from the vines, would they have tasted
as good rs now?" mo, sir" was the
prompt reply. "Why not?" "Bccausc."
said wide-awakc boy. "then wc
shouldn't have had sugar aud cream
with 'em.'