The New Orleans bulletin. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1874-1876, 1874-06-21
AN OPEN LETTER PICKED UP ON
THE STREET.

Ny Dear Archibad: | have yours OF
June 5th inst, written from raised floor
in your country cabin and amid a sea Of
Mississippi water. am sorry for you, old
fellow. It's the devil all over to be Gre
yassed. / know what it is; was there
once, though not quite so far in as you are.
/ had to raise my floor only one foot. You
say yours il raised three and half, and
of course you and your wife can't stand
straight. Lucky, old chap, you didn't marry
earlier; your Oldest children might have
been in the same fix. Marim: Citizens of
crevasse country ought to marry late in
life, or have tall ceilings to their houses.
But you ask me to send you the daily
papers and to write you the news. You
must be satisfied " it'll the BULLETIN, my
friend. | can't take the responsibility Of
sending you the others. Surrounded, as
Won are, by water, and low-spirited, accord
ingly, you'd drown yourself, sure, if you had
to read those other morning papers. l can't
take the responsibility, my friend, because l
cant afford to marry your widow after you
have suicided.
As for news, well, the Levee Convention
at ParlOr P, St. Charles Hotel, is the latest
l know Of 1t has been a funny thing, sure.
Some people call it the great Louisiana
whitewash bucket. Others call it the cha
meleon show. l heard one fellow awhile
ago Indignantly denOunce it as "a HI Of a
mess" l asked him why, and he said be-
cause it was paved with good intentions.
Good old Gov. Baker bunged up one eye
of the concern when he insisted on inviting
VIM. Pitt Kellogg to seat, and somebody
else bunged up the other when he pulled
in Dunk Kenner and his friends Of the
Levee Board. With both eyes bunged, of
course the concern will go staggeri' 6
along to the 25th of July, when it will fall
ipfn tho ditch v,ronarad for II
l like the name "ChameleOn Show :" for
tho so-called convention.
In the first place, VIM. Pitt made vain
effort to change color. 1t was his "dehut +"
amongst gentlemen since bayOnets made
him Governor. His color stuck.
Then there was the stately and smiling
Bradish johnson. Oh! he shOne brilliantly.
He chameleoned amazingly. He dazzled.
He shone rcsplendently. Just think! only
three years ago the Levee bill and Levee
Companies were sinking in the nOstrils Of
Brad. In fact, your correspondent saw him
presiding at meeting of planters in that
same hotel, and there was nothing too strong
for him to say against the "iniquity." And
now Brad is one of the stockholders and
directors in the Louisiana Levee Company !!
Can your Chameleons beat that!
And at that same meeting, three years
ago, was the indignant, fiery and fussy Colo
mel and Congressman, bingham Lawrence.
Then, he fairly sweated Indignation over
the levee "iniquity.' He was par excellence
the noisy man of the occasion. He was, in
pOetical parlance, "chief cook and bottle
washer" until little resolution was Of
fered to wait on his friend the president of
the Citizens Bank, the man who headed the
list of incorporators Of the iniquity, when
he simmerred. In the late convention, Eff
handled the whitewash brush vigorously
for the Levee Company.
Got any chameleOns like that in your re-
gion'
Then there was the ipmitable Duncan
F., Vice President Of the Levee Company
the Magnus Apollo, the factotum Of dirt
piling for big pIices-the patent double
back action tax squeezer. Now, if
fellow didn't know Dunk, he'd swear that it
could not be Dunk in that convention. In
side of three years Dune. went to Donald
sonville with his friend Heney, and such
TRADE as he there poured forth to his old
:" constituents against the "iniquitous"
levee law has not been heard in many day.
l was almost "carried away" by that
speech myself; but l heard a colloGuy be-
tween two old family darkies that soon
brushed up my ante bellum memory, and of
course didn't "holler hurrah" with the
admiring crowd.
Says one of the old darkies:
Nose, wen dat man gifts done spekin,
deere won't be no lcbbe law nur Lebbe Cum
plny left"
"Oh, Lige, 60 long! Don't you know who
dat 10 bellerin'
"No, Nose; who am. hei"
"Wy man, dat's Macs Dunk. Ib'lonxed to
him befo de war. He's trump, sho; but
you mustn't tie to him, Niger; eff you do,
jes wen you done draw you knot and thinks
yoa got him, he GID ffirt, an-well, you
gone up, dat's I'll. Az