davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
A Criminal,s Romantic Career.

A telegram from Quebec, received
few nights ago, mentioned the arrest
aboard the Prussian of defaulter from
France. The antecedents of the pris-
oner are thus recounted by the Paris
correspondent of the London Iete-
graph, under date of Nov. 2: eve
have just received word of one of those
romantic robberies that turn up from
time to time in every country. A GER
tain Teschemacher, German by birth,
has long enjoyed the entire confidence
of a great Anglc-French firm, Messrs.
Poisset, of Bradford and Paris. Though
but % years old and boyish appearance.
Teschemacher occupied the position of
chief cashier, and was even trusted
with authority to sign for the firm.
Just before the war, in a public place,
he made the acquaintance of Mar
guerite Chauvln, person OF some at
fractions, and a superior education.
Led for her sake into large expenses, he
began to gamble on the turf, with such
luck as to win nearly 81, 900 in q very
short time. Thereupon he bought two
ponies, a basket carriage and other
knicknacks of the sort, and hired a
charming little house in the Avenue
Bourdon-a nejghborhood very retired.
There he set up a staff of servants,
passing under the name of Baron Al
phonse. Speaking English excellently,
he was supposed in the Avenue Bourbon
to be a wealthy and eccentric Milford,
whose ruinous expenses were subject of
gossip. Going out early in clothes of the
latest fashion, he passed the day in a
coat almost too ancient for respectable
ity. dined for a franc and half, and
returned home late, fashionably clad as
he had set out. His bachelor chamber,
modest beyond what his position auth
orized, was known to all in the Office
at 81 Boulevard Magenta. But fortune
changed. Cards and horses turned
against the cashier. He began to falsify
his books. But for three years the
double life was led without discovery,
though the servants of Baron A1phonse
are wonderfully suspicious after the
fact. A fortnight since came the warn
ing of a catastrophe inevitable, though
so long deferred. M. Poisset arrived
from Bradford, and proposed to go over
the books. Teschemacher saw his game
was up. opened the safe, took out e12,
600 in notes, and caught the night mail
to London. Having taken care to bal
ance the books, he still left no susp1-
cion behind, until his non-appearance
caused alarm. Before the telegraph
had overlook him, he had taken ship
for Quebec on board the Prussian. His
companion even was too late TO catch
him, having delayed too long over her
trunks. She came back to Paris, and
was arrested with %, 900 francs upon her.
There are policemen looking after
Teschemacher at Quebec, but one cannot
easily think that criminal SO bold and
so experienced has overlooked the uses
of the Atlantic telegraph.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Pith ard Point.

AN affair of the heart-The circu1a-
lion of the blood.
WHY is mouse like load of hay2
Because the catll eat it.
NOTHING comes home so much to q
man as an unsettled bill.
"THIEvING in the outskirts is the
latest for picking ladies' pockets
WHEN we see young man who spends
all he earns, we are inclined to suspect
that he does not always earn all he
spends.
In the case of Kansas man being
struck by lightning, the Coroner's iury
rendered verdict " He was killed by
the Lord, but the Lord is all right
Mrs. PARTINGToN writes to say that
she can't make out why all the s'help''
she gets are SO stupid, when she is al
ways particular to obtain them from an
intelligence Office.
"WHY is advertising like the religion
of a camp-meeting 2" asks the Paper
Trade Journal. tBecause it is good
to all intents and purposes to make
you known to all men.
A LODGING house fiend tells the story
that, in a recent storm, the warning
elements were so awe-inspiring that the
hair in a dish of butter in the pantry,
turned completely white during the.
night.
THE typographical fend has at last
come to grief. A printer in the Lynch
burg Republican Office had his hand
disabled the other day by the bite of a
coon. He had spelled the animals
name with K. And now he bitterly re-
pents it.
A LITERARY man was asked in a letter,
the other day, for some materials for his
biography. The writer was very polite
| and considerate. He said " Heave
forbid that should desire your death,
but such things will occasionally occur,
and it is best to be prepared for the
worst"
| Two cLERGYMEN were busy discussing
a knotty problem in theology. /" L be-
heve," said one, "in the doctrine Of
up went his feet, and. as he bored
hole in the ice, he finished the sentence
=" damnation l'' It did not sound
pretty, but then he didn't intend to say
it in that way.
FIRsrpassenger( with filthy clay pipe }
=" I'm afraid you don't like the smell
of 'bacy, sir ?" Second passenger with
regalia)-" Haw-not other peoples
haw." First passenger ALI right, sir
Anything to oblige gen'elman. just
and us over one of your weeds, and I'll
put out my pipe?" ?"-Punch.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Newspaper Postage.

The following in relation to newspaper
postage is of general interest. At the
last session of Congress, the subject of
postage on newspapers and periodicals
was taken into consideration by that
body, resulting in the passage of bill
compelling advance payment of postage,
and fixing the rate at two cents per
pound on all of that class of matter
published once q week or more fre-
quently, and transmitted to regular
subscribers through the mails, and
three cents per pound on such matter
issued less frequently than once week.
effect Jan. 1, 1875. The Postmaster
General being by the law confined to a
choice of one of three modes of collect
ing the postage by means of stamps,
considerable attention has been given
to the matter by this office and after a
careful review of the plans proposed, it
was deemed best to recommend the
adoption of the system of prepayment
by postage stamps affixed to q mem
orandum of mailing, or, in other words,
to stub IN book retained by the
postmaster at the mailing Office, re-
celpt, showing the weight of matter and
the amount paid, being given by the
postmaster to the person mailing the
oesAhC, bAO oGdAIpS d1nA6o IO Tile SUD 10
be Cancelled by cutting punch, thus
preventing their reuse. This plan, it
is believed, is more practicable and less
expensive in its operations than either
of the others, while at the same time il
will be quite as effectual in collecting
the postage. A series of stamps have
been devised of "a denominations, by
means of which any sum which is q
multiple of either the two or three cent
rate, from two cents to $72, can be made
by the use of not more than five stamps
It is expected that, Notwithstanding the
reduction of rates by the law, the sys
TEN of compulsory prepayment Of
newspaper postage will yield larger
revenue to the department than has evel
been collected. In the city of New
York alone, comprehensive inquiry
seems to warrant the belief that not less
than $500, 900 per annum will be paid
sum which is little less than one hall
of the entire revenue from newspaper
postage throughout the United States
during the fiscal year just closed. II
is, however, impossible to estimate the
actual increase for the whole country,
owing to that provision of the law which
allows the free mail circulation of news
papers in the counties in which they are
printed.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
THE OLD zoarE.
By WILL WALLACE HARNEY.

An outdoor quiet held the earth
Beneath the winter moon,
The cricket chlrped in coy mirth,
And the kettle crooned, upon the hearth,
A sweet, old-fashioned tune.
The old clock licked, drowsy race,
With the clicking of the cricket,
And red Goals In the chimney-place
Peeped out with many q rosy face,
Like berries in a thicket.
The cranes arm empty, stuck out stiff,
And tinware ON the shelves
Twinkled and winked at every gIiG,
In the Pickering dre-hght, as IL
They whispered to themselves.
The good dame, in her ruffled cap,
Counted her stitches slowly,
And the old man, with full many q gap.
Read from the Big Book on his lap.
The good words, wise and holy.
The old clock clicked, the old man ready
His deep voice pausfng, lowering;
The good wife nodded, dropped her head
The lids of both were heavy as lead
They were sound asleep and snoring.
Oh, hale ola couple sW eet each dreamy
While-all the milk k-pans fitting
Puss paints her whiskers in the cream,
Till John and the belated team
Bring Maggie from the quilting.
May Time. pray, when failing years az
Make thin my voice and thrapple,
Find my last days of life like theirs,
AS sweet with children's love and pray ers,
And like winter-appie.
-!ScribFsers for December.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
an airy place uncorked for three days,
chanoiner tha water every day

an airy place uncorked for three days,
changing the water every day.
BAKED EaGs.-Beat up six eggs, one
tablespoonful of flour, six of sweet
milk; melt youl butter in the frying
pan when hot, turn the whole in, we'll
beaten, and bake In a hot oven.
To TAKE grease spots out of carpets,
mix a little soap in gallon of warm
soft water, then add half-an-ounce of
borax wash the part well with clean
cloth. and the grease or dirty spot will
soen disappear.
BRITANNIA ware, says one who has
tried it, should first be washed with
woolen cloth and sweet oil, then washed
In water r'and suds, and rubbed with soft
leather and whiting. Thus treated it
will retain it's beauty to the last
SAUCE FOR DUCKS. Serve a rich
gravy in the dish, cut the breast into
slices, but don't take them off; cut q
lemon and put pepper and salt on it
then squeeze it on the breast, and pour
a spoonful of gravy over before you
serve it out.
To prevent badness, says a CORE
spondent, throw away all oils and po-
mades, and wash the parting of the hair
with cold water, night and morning, dry
thoroughly, and then use a good stiff
brush and keep brushing until redness
or warm glow is produced.
THE yellow spots produced by nitric
acid may be removed from brown or
black woolen goods, while fresh, by re-
peatedly dipping them into a concen-
trated solution of permangaie of potassa
and then washing them with water.
The yellow spots on the hands may be
removed in the same way, the brown
stain produced by the permanganate
being removed by an aqueous solution
of sulphurous acid.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
A Clean Apron.

A lady wanted trusty little maid to
come and help her to take charge of a
baby. Nobody could recommend one,
and she hardly knew where to look for
the right kind of a girl. One day she
was passing through a by-lane and saw
little girl with a clean apron holding
baby in the doorway OF small house.
That is the maid for me, ;" said the
lady. She stopped and asked for her
mother. '' Mother has gone out to
work, answered the girl. Father is
dead, and now mother has to do every
thing" " Should you not like to come
and live with me ?" asked the lady.
81 should like to help mother some
how" said the little maid. The lady,
more pleased than ever with the tidy
looks of the little girl, went to see her
mother after she came home, and the
end of it was that the lady took the
maid to live with her, and she found
what, indeed, she expected to find
that the neat appearance of her person
showed the neat and orderly bent of her
mind. She had no careless habits );
she was no friend to dirt but every
thing she had to do with was folded up
and put away, and kept carefully. The
lady finds great comfort in her, and
helps her mother, whose lot is not now
SO bad as it was. She smiles when she
says, "Sally's recommendation was her
clean apron ;" and who will say that it
was not good one?
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
THE ToUNG FOLKS.
Tue Eat Brigade.

lac Fat Brigade.
A rat-s-tat-tAt and q rat-a-tai-tat!
Did You ever hear music stirring as that?
The chubby old fellows are all parade;
With rat-a-tat-tar,
And a rat-4-ta.-tat,
And rat-a-eat-tAt tattoo
John is the general, and rides at the head
Sister has lent hlIn ribbon of red;
He ties it around for beautiful sash:
He rides on broorastick, and cuts n big dash
With rat-a-tat-tat,
And u rat-2-tAt-tat.
And a rat-a-tat-tat tattoo!
Jake is the colonel, and that's verv plain
And he canters along on his papa's new cane;
And his gay epaulets are pink motto papers
That wave in the wind as he prances and Gamers
With o rat-a-tSt-tat
And aFat-a-tat-tat,
And rat-s-tat-tat tattoo.
Jim Is the captain and he gaIlops next.
But his horse is prankish Ji1r.uiy is vexed
For he rides an uEIore Ia that will not stay shut,
Though he lashes its ribs with a slash and a cut.
With rat-a-rat-tat,
And ! rat-a-tat-tat,
And q rat-a-tat-tat tattooi
Tom is heutenant-but where is his horse?
Alss II vas killed in the skirmish, of course!
30, as ne can't ride, he walks to the battle,
And cheers on the with royal big rattle
With rat-a-tat-tat,
Ald rst-a-tat-tat,
And a rat-a-tat-tat tattooi
Joe is the drummer, and gayly he comes,
With the quickest OF sticks the tightest of drums
He's prince of the parchment; he's king OF the taps
And the horses and men keep time to his raps,-
With rat-a-tat-tat,
And a rat-a-tat-tat,
And . rat-2-tat-tat tattoo!
These are the boys who are never afraid.
On biscuit forGy, GIN erbread raid
SO beware Of the charge of the Fat Brigade -
With rat-a-tat-tat,
And . rat-a-tat-tat,
And rat-a-tat-tat tattoo
-Cs7eeT d. WaGslr0rth in The Nursery.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18

The SIX FoLLIEs OF ScIENcE.-The
SIX follles OF science are said to be the
following The quadrature of the cir
Gle the establishment of perpetual mo-
tion; the philosophers stone; the
transmutation of metals divination. or
the discovery of secrets by magic and.
lastly, judicial astrology. 1t is unwise
to say that anything is impossible. until
the impossibility is demonstrated. If
is not at all improbable that the present
century may see that one of these So
called follies is a reality. of
applied Sciences.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Playing Dead.

During noontime play-spell at one
of our schools, short time since, some
little girls conceived the idea of playing
dead. One of them assumed the role
of corpse, and suffered herself to be
' laid out on one of the benches, to be
viewed and remarked upon, according
to the manner of their elders. Their
teacher had laid himself out on one of
the benches in the school-room, pre-
tending to be asleep, but was really en-
joying the frolics of the children, when
one lisping 5-year-old discovered him,
and straightway exclaimed to her
mates, so teacherths dead !
They were all Immediately interested,
and began their remarks, which made
him also feel anxious to hear the
opinions of his several pupils. They
passed around him laying their little
hands upon his forehead, shaking their
pretty heads in all solemnity, each
one making her own little remark, such
as He makes pretty corpse :"
t' How his mother must feel :" &C It's
a pity he died SO young = "He looks
natural - etc. Then came little FIVE
year-old, who, with earnest countenance
and subdued voice, said s' Yeth, he
lookth natural, but he smellth bathe
The fun had reached its climax the
teacher rolled off the bench in "a fit of
laughter, and the children ran away.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
How to Avoid Taking Cold.

A cold is simply developer of dis
eased condition, which may have been
latent or requiring only some favorino
condition to burst out into the fame Of
disease. That this is usually the cor
rect view of cold as a disease producing
agent, under all ordinary circumstances.
may be made plain by reflection upon
personal experience, even to the most
ordinary understanding. When the hu-
man body Is at its prime-with youth,
vigor, purity and good constitution on
it's side-no degree Of ordinary exposure
to cold gives rise to any unpleasant eff
fects. All the ordinary PRECAUTIONS
against colds, coughs and rheumatic
pains may be disregarded, and no i'll
effects ensue. But let the blood be.
come impure, let the body become de-
ranged from any acquired disorder, or
let the vigor begin to wane, and the in
frmities of age be felt by occasional
arrangements in some vital part, either
from inherited or acquired abuses, and
the action of cold will excite more or
less disorder of some kind, and the form
of this disorder, or the disease which
will ensue, will be determined by the
kind of pre-existing blood impurity, or
processes. 1t follows, from these facts
avoiding the unpleasant consequences
thought to spring wholly from the
action of cold upon the body has
very little dependence upon exposure,
but a great deal upon an impure
and weak condition of all the vital
processes. Ii other words, with an
average of superior constitution, and
an intelligent observance of all the laws
of health, men and women could not
take cold if they wanted to they might
be exposed to the action of cold to a de-
gree equal to the beast of the field, and
with like impunity. But in the case of
persons with feeble constitutions, and
who disregard, knowingly or otherwise,
and most frequently otherwise, the con-
ditlons of healthy existence, no degree
of care will prevent the taking of cold,
as it is termed. They may live in
houses regulated with all the precision
of hot-house, they may cover them
selves with the most highly-protective
clothing the market provides, and vet
they will take cold. do not think the
consumptive person lives. or ever will
live, even if kept in a temperature alb
solutely uniform, and clothed in a
wholly faultless manner, in whom the
well-known signs of one cold after an
other will not be apparent. But, on
the other hand, there are those who,
ike the late Sir Henry Holland, of
good constitutions and living IN accord
ance with the laws of health, may travel
as he did from the tropics to the arc
tics again and again, clad only in an or
dinary dress coat, and yet scarcely know
what it IS to have a cold or a sickness of
any kind. The truth, is, that to avoid
taking cold from ordinary or even ex-
| traordinary exposure, the vital pro-
cesses must be made strong enough to
rise above the untoward influence Of
external conditions.-ZHea aSQnitariaaa.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Onr Direct Trade

1t is fact worthy of note that while
the direct trade between Chicago and
Europe is constantly on the increase,
that between here and New York is
rapidly decreasing. A few years since
all the provisions and breadstuffs ex-
ported from the United States to Eu-
rope were purchased through New York
by agents in this city. At present the
shipments are either made direct to
Europe by Chicago firms or foreign
houses who either have branches here
or send their orders to Chicago houses
to buy. Not one pound in ten of the
provisions shipped from the West, and
especially that sent from Chicago to Eu-
rope, is rehandled in New York. A
very large percentage goes by the way
of Portland or Boston. PHILADELPHIA
is also diverting portion of this export
trade, and in a few weeks the Baltimore
and Ohio railroad will have its line COM
pleted to this city, and being by far the
shortest and most direct line to the sea-
board will be able to carry freight at
such a rate as will enablo Baltimore to
outbid Gotham for the export trade of
the West. To such an extent has the
trade between New York and the West
fallen off during the past two years,
that Chicago firms, who few years
since established branches in New
York, find it Improbable to continue
them, and are preparing to concentrate
their capital here with a view to in
creasing their direct trade with Europe.
Our direct import trade is also rapidly
growing, and our leading iobbers are
now importing nearly all the foreign
goods sold in this market. The rapidi-
ty with which capital is concentrating
in the West, and the improved means
of shipping Western product to the
markets of the old world and receiving
their merchandise In return without
paying tribute to the seaboard cities,
will soon enable the West to dispense
with the services of Eastern merchants
in order to sell or to buy from the mer-
chants of Europe and other foreign
countries. Chicago Courier.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Household Hints.

To BLANCH RABBIr.-Set It on the fire
in small quantity of cold water, and
let it boil; as soon as it boils it is to be
taken out, and put in cold water for a
few minutes.
THE odor of phial that has contained
medicine may be removed by filing it
with cold water and letting it stand in
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
Lean or Fat, According to CIrcum-
stances.

SIanCeSs
A Paris letter has this story of an ac-
tor who was too thin: GA well-known
physician advised him to go to one of
the bathing places in the Pyrenees.
Parlet accordingly asked for leave of
absence from his theater, and went to
the prescribed locality, where he drank
and bathed with the utmost zeal and
perseverance. But neither drinking
nor bathing seemed to have any effect
on him, and he remained just as much
of a skeleton as before. Patience
urged the local doctor, in reply to his
expressions of disappointment; there
is nothing like the water of our springs
for making people fat 7 One day,
when Parlet was perfectly soaking him
self in a bath, in the hope of an in
crease in weight which seemed in no
haste to declare itself, he heard a co1lo-
guy in the bathing cabinet next his
own, between the local Esculapius and
lady of enormous obesity. Doctor,
remarked the lady, I am really losing
heart and patience. Why SO p in
quired the doctor. Because, though
| have been taking these waters regu-
larly for two months, / am not one
ounce hghterl' Patience, madame 7
said the doctor in his most persuasive
tones, there is nothing like the water
of our springs for making people
| thin I'''
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18

BosToN has So, 45O, 900 of church
property, and gave in 1873 for religious
purposes, not including strictly benevo-
lent institutions, over 81, 600, 900. In
all, Boston gives away more than her
taxation.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18

THERE are in the United States to-day
75O. 600 adult white men who can neither
read nor write, while of adult white wom-
en- in the same illiterate condition the
number amounts to l, 10000.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18

AN Indianapolis night-policeman has
been presented with neat little jewel
ed alarm clock, to wear in his coat
pocket and wake up by when the hour
for going off duty arrives.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18

A FEMALE writer, speaking of afinities,
observes that a woman now and then
meets man to whom she can truthfully
say On the barren shores of time.
O., my souls kinsman I have found
in thee my pearl of great price, and
there is nothing more precious out of
heaven" have no doubt that this is
the case, and while would not rudely
mar the sweet poetic beauty of the pic
tnre thus summed up, my experience
teaches me that the women who begin
by talking in this sugary manner are
usually prone to throw skillets and fiat
irons at g their souls kinsman" after
marriage, and to growl at the "peari
of great price" because he comes to bed
with his feet cold. .-Ma1 Adeler.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1874-12-18
CrndIe scene.

Three angels were watching babe IN
a cradle. One held a dial to marx tne
6,s1-,- 81 ;ts I1IrfI1 and said: s. VIII this
new life lead to good or evil ?"
In an adjoining room three little