The interior journal. [volume] (Stanford, Ky.) 1872-1881, 1874-07-17
THAT REMINDS ME-.

subscription bill.
Smirkins looked at tho painting of
pig and then pleasantly askcd "who is
that pigment forT
4 recent ghost was hcarl singing;
"'Twas cough that carried me of.
Twas . coffin they carried mc oli i'm
Elijah Bugg, Of Springfield, Ohio, has
been in he'd for nine years. Corrosive
sublimatc or Co.tar's exterminator is
recommended. ~
An unreasonable resident of Roches.
ter refused to pay the gas comlnny's bill
for sls, on the trivial quibble that there
were no gas burners in his house.
a mother advised her daughter to oil
her hair, and tainted away when the
damsel replied, ooh, no, ma It spoils
the gentlemen's vests"
All the watering. place hotel clerks are
practicing on the response "Besicando,'
so as to be ready for guests who are dis
satisfied with their room assignments.
\ lady entered telegraph office re-
Gently, and after delivering her message,
earnestly requested that the answer
should moi he reSoby the operator, ~ 1t
was of very private nature.
An Irishman, after he had seen nu-
merous hills and mountain ranges in
New Hampshire, exclaim d: "Bedad, /
never was in country before where
they had so much land they had to stack
it,"
Emily Faihfu,. the English lady, who
is one OF the most respected and able Of
the advocates of the interests of her sex,
says that. IN her opinion. the intemper-
ate use Of ice-water Is one of the causes
of the delicate health Of American wo-
men.
"Fellow-travellers,' said colored
preacher, "ef had been catin' dried ap-
pies fur a week, an den took to drinkin'
for monf. | couldn't feel more swellcd
up dan | is dis mint wild pride an vani-
at at seein' sich full tendance har."
4 Connecticut man, whose son was i'll,
appealed to the physician "Do bring
him out of it right away, dnetor; do
break up the fever at once, even if you
charge us much as if he went through a
whole course of fever"
"How's business now" inquired one
Nashville merchant of another, ycster-
day. "Dull feartully dull. The fact
is nobody buys anything just now but
provisions and whisky-the bare neces-
saries of life, as it were"
\ man named Button died recently In
Southern Berkshire, Mass, and when
the sexton started out with pick and
shovel, somebody asked him what he
was going to do. Going to make
Button-hole," was the not very grave re-
ply.
At a prayer meeting of colored peo-
pie in Erie. the deeeney and good order
of the meeting was disturbed by negro
named Brown, whose prayers in public
were only incoherent rawlings, the pastor
inquired; "What fool nigga. dat pray
in down dar near lie doe ?" \ dozen
people replied with one voice 1T am
bruddah Brown, sah." Den replied
the pastor, "Brudlah Brown sub ide,
and let some one pray dat' sitter
'quainted wild de Lord"
An old Scotch farmer called at Il par
sonage shortly after the death OF the
minister, hearing that small token of
remembrance WAS To he given to such of
the flock a. might ask for it. The wid-
ow asked Sandy what he would like to
have. "Weel, my :ady,' said Sandy, /
scratching hi head, Il hardly ken what
sort of Il n'cnento mori, as ye Gait, to
take. hut If lc hae nae objection, wud
tax that heap . guano ye hae in the
back yri.'
\ few days asn hungry party eat
down at the Ncli-sprcad supper table of
II SOUND steamer, upon which one Of the
dishes contained trout Of moderate
size. \ serIous-looking individual drew
this dish toward him saying, apologetic.
ally, "This is fast day with me-" His I.
next neighbor, an Irish gentleman, inl-
mediately inserted his fork into the fish
and Transferred it to his own plate, re.
marking, "sir, do You suppose nobody
has q ~,wl to be saved but yourseif!'
At Evansville, recently. u man ftll
into ditch on the outskirts Of the town.
\ pedestrian helped him to his feet, and
after the thing lad been accomplished
our hero said IAN right-hic c-rll
vote for you Tue stranger lookcd AT
him doublinlly, and wished To know
what for, "Wha office YOU runniu for"
|; Nore AT all, was the answer. Not
n eandi,late:' mo, why? :" "Why-
hic--why;" Cause | don't know "A,
any maud-hic help neither as YOU
did thought brin' a candidate"