Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1874-08-27

of his wife, was to be at once publicly
pressed against me; and if it was, hat
: nothing but my simple word of denia
, to interpose against it. In my theI
morbid condition of mind, though
that this charge, although entirely un
true, might result in great disaster, i
not in absolute ruin. The great inter
. ests which were entirely dependent or
me, the church which / had built up
the book which was writing, my OWE
immediate family, my brothers name
now engaged in the ministry, my sis
tiers, the name which l had hoped
might live after me and be in some
slight degree a source of strength and
. encouragement to those who should
succeed me, and above all the cause for
which l had devoted my life, seemed
imperiled. 1t seemed to me that my
life-work was to emu abruptly and in
disaster. My earnest desire to avoid a
! public accusation, and the evils which
must necessarily flow from it and which
now have resulted from it, has been
one of the leading motives that must
explain my action during these four
years with reference to this matter.
THE APOLOGY.
/ II WdS III SUCH SOTt aIlO utStI cSolIlS
condition that Mr.. MoultOn found me.
His manner was kind and cOnciliatOry;
he seemed, however, to be convinced
that bad been seeking Tilton's down.
fall, that had leagued with Mr.. Bow
en- against him, and that / had by my
| advice came near destroying his fanli-
ly. l did not need any argument or
persuasion to induce me to do and say
| n ~ Il; ioI, oIx ho in
jury of which then believed I had
certainly been the occasion if not the
active cause. But Mr.. Moulton urged
that having wronged so, the wrong
meant his means of support suddenly
family destroyed, and that had done
it. He assured me of his own knowl-
edge that the stories which had heard
which had believed and repeated to
Mr.. Bowen, We're all false, and that
Mr.. Tilton had always been faithful to
his wife. / was persuaded into the be-
lief of what he said, and felt convicted
of SANDER in its meaneSt form. He
drew the picture of Mr.. TiltOn Wronged
purse, shattered in his family where he
"Odiu OthCI NloO iOuh0 iCldSO,
and at the same time looking upon me
out of his deep distress, while 1, abound
ing in friends, most popular, and with
ample means, he drew that picture
my prosperity overhowing and abound
ing, and Tilton's utter degradation-I
was most intensely excited indeed;
giving away; l walked up and down
hn forth ~
the most unreStrained grief and bitter
ideas were of the obligation of friend
ship and of the sacredneSs of the house
hold; denying, however, ali Intentional
wrong, seeing that if had been the
cause, however remotely, of that which
/ then beheld, 1 never could forgive
myself, and heaping all the blame on
peared to my eyes, was strongly
against me. My old fellow-worker had
been dispossessed of his eminent place
and influence, and had counseIed it.
His family had we'll nigh been broken
up, and had advised it; his wife had
been long sick and broken in health
and body, and l, as fully believed it,
had been the cause of all this wreck, by
continuing that blind heedlessness and
friendship which had beguiled her
heart and had reused her husband into
furry of jealousy, althouh not caused
by any Intentional act of mine. And
should l coldly defend myself? Shold
l pour indignation upon this lady?
Should hold her up to contempt as
having thrust her affection upon me
unsought? Should tread upon the
man and his household in their great
adversely? gave vent to my feelings
without measure. disclaimed with
the greatest earaestness all intent to
harm Theodore in his home or busi-
ness, and with inexplicabie sorrow
both blamed and defended Mrs. TiltOn
in one breath.
Moulton was apparently affected by
my sOlilOquy, for it was that, rather
than a conversation. He said that if
Tilton could really be persuaded of the
friendliness of my feelings towards
him, he was sure that there would be
90 trouble in procuring a reconcilia-
ton. gave him leave to state to The |
odore my feelings. He proposed that
L should write letter. l declined, but |
said that he could report our interview.
He then prepared to make memoran-
dunn of the talk, and sat down at my |
table, and took down, as supposed, a |
condensed report of my talk; for went |
on still pouring out my wounded feel |
ings over this great dissolution in Mr.. |
Tilton's family. 1t was not dictation
of sentence after sentence, he mere
and composing for him.
Moulton was putting into his own
shape parts of that which I was saying
in my own manner, with profuse ex-
plantations. This paper of Moulton's
was mere memorandum of points to
be used by him in setting forth nv
feelings. That it contains matter and
points derived from me is without
doubt; but they were put into sentences
by him, and expressed as he under
stood them, not as my words, but as
hints of my figures and letters, to be
used by him in conversing with Mr..
Tilton.
NOT MR.. BEECHER'S APOLOGY.
He did not read the paper to me nor
did I read it, nor have ever seen it or
heard it read that l remember, until
The publication of Tilton's recent dOcu-
nents; and now reading it, see in it
thoughts that point to the matter of my
discourse; but it is not my paper, nor
ire those my sentences, nor is it cor
rect report of what l said. 1t is mere
string of hints hastily made by an un-
Dracticed writer as helps to his memo
y in representing to Mr.. Tilton how
elt toward his family. If more than
this be claimed-if it be set forth as in ,
my proper since my letter, then dis
)Wn it add denounce it. Some of its
sentences, and particularly that 10
which am made to say that had OBJ
aimed Mrs. Tilton's forgiveness,r nev- !
,r could have said, even in substance.
had not obtained nor asked any for
,iveness from her, and nobody pretend
I'd that had done so. Neither could l
ever have said that humbled myself s
before Tilton as before God-except in /