National Republican. (Washington City (D.C.)) 1872-1888, 1874-04-06
HOODOOLSA.
THE CHARMED LIFE OF A STEAMBOAT
PORTER


PORTER.
EFrom the Cincinnati Times.1
One of the most miraculous episodes we were
ever called upon to record, occurred on the last
trip of the steamer Wildwood. 1t was an IN
mistakahle case where true love didn't run
smooth, but on the contrary, developed most
turbulent results. It is C love story, and to
give the facts in romantic way, we must COM
mence at the beginning.
Alfred Huden is second porter of the Wild
wood, and q very spry little fellow he is. Al
fred is not much in stature, but possesses an
undaunted heart. Through the advantages
afforded BY his position, he has acquired won
derful conversational powers, and in his 'front.'
ispiece twinkle the most rogish eyes, all of
which, added to "a superbly mounted NOUS
tache, makes him an object of alteration among
the opposite sex of his acquaintance. Alfred
could have taken his pick from among scores of
dusky beauties, but bis affections alghted on
one whose sphere Of action was numerous
shades lighter.
Nevertheless, Alfred went in on the princt
pie that "faint heart meier won fair lady," and
after briet siege the heart of the lille opened
to his addresses, and In brief space of time
they were happy some" They lived together
for time in the comparative enjoyment OF
welded bliss, wherein two children came into
this world of toll and trouble. Alfred piled his
vocation on the river, and in the meantime a
cousin bearing the same surname became q fire.
quent visitor in times Of absence. The scandal
caused in the social circle of these parties soon
came to the ears of the husband, and, finally,
in moment of Indignation over faithless love,
he gathered his BARN to his bosom and left the
better half to her lot.
The reader may here substitute any amount
of time which the Imagination may suppose to
have elapsed between the last chapter and the
one just beginning. 1t will give greater effect,
and aid the historian in his efforts to faithfully
record the events of this domestic infelicity.
On the last trip Of the Wildwood the cousin
of Alfred came on board at Augusta, whether
with belligerent intent or not is unknown. At
all events he approached the steps where the
injured husband stood, and proceeded to ascend;
but the wounds Of the heart broke out afresh
at the sight Of his miserable rival, and, with a
well-directed blow, laid him low at his feet.
Huden No. 2, the cousin, picked himself up
Immediately, and drawing q pistol from his
pocket, pointed the muzzfe within an inch Of
AlIrtIs mOutu, anu pulleQ the Trigger. Inc
bali sped on its way, and at last accounts had't
stopped. To the great surprise of those who
witnessed the act, Alfred stood as erect as ever,
while the only signs of an injury were o few
fS5cps Of eis9a which drippes fs2n BIZ nous
The would-be-murderer raised his arm and
fired again, holding the weapon so close that
ing of the intended victim, and still he stood
unmoved. Again the deadly weapon spoke,
and this time Il seemed to bring the little por-
ter 70 bic senses:
snatching al fx near at hand he made
lunge at his antagonist, VINO began a retreat
toward the stern Of the boat, firing three shots
as he went. Finally bis wey was blocked by a
offering itself, he lodged among the legs of the
prancing steeds and escaped to the opposite
side of the boat.
Just sbout this time the Wildwood was
making landing at Smiths Landing, and the
cousin Jumped ashore and disappeared in the
darkness up the bank.
Alfred's wounds were examined, and proved
to be mere scratches. The bullet that struck
him in the mouth made only slight cash in
the upper lip. What became of the ball is not
known, but 1t is supposed it passed down his
throat, and is now perambulating throughout
his system. Il will some day, no doubt, make
its presence known in the heel Of his boot.
The second bullet struck him in the len
breast, near the region of the heart, and glanc
ing on a rib bone took course up and over his
shoulder, making the furrow in the latter.
Ball No. disappeared up his sleeve, and at
a point about half way came in contact with an
angular projection, which 1t "barked," and
then proceeded to boar its way through the
cloth, rendering patch necessary In that VI
cinity. None Of the other balls struck him.
Alfred was as lively as q cricket this morn
ing, and handled the heavier baggage with his
usual vigor. Indeed, It is said, be waited OF
The only visible signs Of the ARRAY are few
bullet holes about the boats deck, piece on
court-plaster on Aifred's lip, and q hole in his
coat.