The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-05-28
A BARON IN DISGUISE.
The Florida Hotel Keeper who was very
Badly Deceived.

The Florida Hotel Keeper who was very
Badly Deceived.
The people of Jacksonville, Florida,
are having their fun over one of their
hotel keepers. The story is told as
follows A rough-looking man entered
the hotel and wrote his name upon the
register. His face and hands were sun
burned, and his eyes looked bloodshot.
The watchman thought that he detect
ed smell of whisky about his clothes.
A gray flannel shirt, torn coat, dirty
breeches, and scaly brogans were all
that the visitor wore. The watchman
gazed at him few seconds, as if un-
decided whether to kick him out or al
low him to remain.
"Could 1 have rooms placed at my
service ?" inquired the hard looking
customer.
Watchman hesitated. He eyed the
applicant very closely and smelled of
him. There was taint of liquor in the
air. ooh, you wants room, do you,
old fellow ?" the watchman said.
Well, just step here a moment, and
keep your hands in your pockets while
I run up stairs and see if the landlord
will assign you one."
There's man down stairs wants q
room," the watchman said.
"Who is he ?" inquired the Deacon.
A drunken old Irishman," was the
reply.
"What does he look like ?" was the
interrogatory.
"Look like?" repeated the watch
man. "He's the worst looking Irish
man that ever saw, and he's drunk"
Well, slap him in No. 40. I guess
that's good enough for him."
"I guess that it's better than he ever
had before" answered the watchman as
he closed the door.
Down stairs he dashed. The bag
gage was all safe. The Trishman stood
facing the register with his hands in his
pockets.
This way, old fellow" the watch
man exclaimed, again mounting the
steps. The old Celt followed him. No.
40 was a cramped apartment in the top
of wing of the hotel Immediately over
the kitchen. The carpet was dusty,
the nose of the wash pitcher was
broken, and the furniture generally was
not calculated to please a fastidious
taste.
els this my room ?" the Irisbman
asked.
eyes, this is your room," replied the
watchman.
Well, then," said the Celt, ct
must tell you that this won't do. I
want larger apartment, one that is
we'll furnished and with sooparier ac-
commodations.
"Oh, you do, Ell? I suppose you
would like the ladies' parlor. You can
consider yourself mighty lucky to get
this room. If was the proprietor I
would hoist you into the hay mow."
The old Irishman stared at the watch
man in perfect surprise. It was some
seconds before he could catch his
breath. ''I'm greatly obloiged to ye
for your impertinence, he said, "but
if L cawn't find accommodations here J.
must go where 1 can find them"
" That's right, old fellow, you better
go to the Grand National. That's the
place for such slouchy old roosters as
you"
And the indignant old Celt walked
down three flights of stairs followed by
the equally indignant watchman. AS
the old man was about to pass out the
front doors he met half dozen hard
listed companions about to enter.
"Hold on, boys" he said, "This is
too aristocratic for oos." The National
is the place for such slouchy ould
roosthers as oos."
And they went to the other hotel.
Two large express wagons loaded with
trunks travelled in in their wake. The
whippoorwills laughed at them as they
passed under the water oaks shading
the public square, and the stars shone
brightly as they disappeared under the
portico.
Whet the sun arose the landlord
came down stairs with fine appetite.
GOOD morning, Kingsbury," he
said. "How's your drunken Irishman
this morning. Is he up yet p
"No SIR" replied the watchman.
" No. 40 wasn't good enough for him.
He wanted the bridal chamber, and I
made him dust"
Here the Deacon stepped to the reg
lister, and began to read the list of ar
rivals. Suddenly his eyes dilated. A
flush overspread his countenance. Put
ting his forefnger upon the book he
shouted, Here, here, Kingsbury.
What's this? Look here"
The watchman looked at the finger.
1t pointed to the name of