The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1874-07-07
Agriie,alturjs,,, Z, : Makfts,
.Sr,,se and Mo,llscuse.

60 H. W.
I Please define good. wife, A silent
partner in the concern. 49,
Excuse haste and bad PEN. as the
pig said when he broke out. 49, =.
You may know an old bachelor by
the fact that he always speaks of baby
as "it." ~ 3
"Haye you heard my last song ?"
asked music writer of gruff critic.--
81 hope so, was the reply. asnss. v-gaas s
General Wiley declines being a can-
didate for nomination as Secretary of
State before the Democratic State Con-
venton' a gls,z sssra
!. A young man wearing alligator boots
and a sssr ofmapye pants can marry
in Indiana where John Jacob Astor's 8
sons would be sneezed at szsSs Fsaf ''s2
s A Chinaman thus describes trial in
our courts: One man is silent, another
talks all the time, and twelve wise men
condemn the man who has not said q
word. Eoe rae ~ sS,Esk : zssase 81
"Patrick," said the priest, show much
hay did you steall'' ''Well I, may, as
well confess to your reverence for the
whole stack, for 1 am going after the
balance of it tonight" 7esl@ DiA ea5
Och! % said love sick Hibernian.
"what recreation it is to be dying Of
love! 1t sets the heart aching so deli.
cately there's no taking awink of sleep
for the pleasure of the pain"
"What," says the Toledo Democrat,
"shall we do with our boys p If they
are likely to turn out to be such men as
their fathers, we would advise. YOU to
shoot them.-Courier-J Journal. is,z .rs,
Prof.-"Why is the moon always rep.
resented in Greek: poetry as q cow
Soph.-"I don't know, sir unless it is
because of the popular superstition tha,
the moon is made Of green cheese." ~ q
The tide of empire is undergoing q
refux. California papers speak oef The
great emigration (which isllagoing or
from that State to the eastern slope O
the Rocky Mountains. 4 One paper fig
ures up that this amounts to 12,000 pei
month. ~ = =
"Do you 60 to Sabbath school, my
lad ?" kindly asked . city missionary O
a. depraved little Dubuque urchin.-
"Nary," answered the innocent child
II'but I've got fghtin' cock that car
walk over any bird, in this town tha
wears gaffs. " s. '1, 80 s. = .''is g re
At Windsor, Canada, a man raffiel
off his family Bible for ten cents ].
shake; in Buffalo a man sold his shantI
| for SO to raise money to take himsel
and "old woman" over TO Canada tc
see prize fight, tied ss9li q agris5srg =, ~ =.
A Virginia Sheriff asked "a murdere
if be wanted to make a speech on th
gallows, and the man replied i.Gues
not; itlooks like rain, and / don't wan
to get wet; go omswidl the hanging.n-
Detroit Free ePressai iRd1 sus34gsss d,
After severil years NV refecktion,
. have come to the konklusion that tn
three most diffikult things in life are.-
list Carryin' an arm full NV 1--WE eels NJ
a steep hill without spillin' an eel 2d
Akin as a referee at a dog fight with
out getting mad; Sd. E litin' d ncwspa
lper. -. - = ..'''''is's'f,! /,
Galvanism was discovered by maj
named Swammerdamm, one. hundre
and thirty years before ,Galyani calle,
attention to it. The world, however
will not willingly change the name i
torder to give him the honor bclongin
to him. Swammerdammis m would b
awful. so 90 bna I; salrvib - 3.
| A rural paper observes, with gres
felicity of expression: These moon
light nights! All, by how many win
embowered gates, soft eyes look ,,loy
to eyes that speak again and the pres
[sure of aiiny hand in the. huge, mascl
line paw wakes to ecslacy the liyinl
i liar.D asf.ss.g as-.t -, :. -.
j Says a wit: sLast year saw Q wate
lspring, note ran, arope walk, ihors
|ay, and even the big trees leave; {
even sawia plank walk,and Third avs
nue. bank run; but the other day, / sa'
i a tree box, a Cat fish, and a stone fence
i am prepared to see the Atlantic coas
and the Pacific slope "a 09S h
If twentv-seven inches of snow Civ
4 three inches OF water, how much mil
4 will a cow give fed upon turnips2 ? Mu
4 liply the fakes by the hair. on the cow
tail, then divide the produetsby turni
4 and pound of chalk ! multiply tn
whole by the pump, and che total wi
be the answer. .SsijG5g.d ss9g1 @
\ An editor in small town in. Illinoi!
1who attended an apple pairing, becam
1 imhued with the whirl Of society, an
this is the way it affected him. ssW
are in the midst of the season for pa
ties, dancing, mirth and festivity. Tt
rosined hair of the horse travels me
rily over the intestines of the agile ca
evoking music to which impatient fe
trip gaily upon the foor"H51'9 sses $
| The lack of a postal treaty -betyee
the United, States and France has, lon
been discreditable to both nations, an
the announcement that !. a conventio
has at last been concluded between til
two Governments will be received wit
general satisfaction. The price OF. LEI
ter postage, ten cents one way an min
cents the other, is still too high, but tn
present reduc,io ion issa. sensible improv,
ment.s s'egsH irla sslgHgE saT-eg
| 8 High and Low Church is as much
division! of the EaiscopaliansRGinss0li 0li
as in Wisconsin. The feeling for, nm
against Ritualism has been runnin
high in. the Diocese since the death e
Bishop Mcllvaine, and has finally Gu
minated in division of the Diocese :
!. Bishop Bedell, whose proclivities. al
High Church, will go with the Norther
Diocese, and take up his residence 1
Cleveland. seis Tas - sIoodof a.ilr,
A Macon negro philosopher. discus
ing the relations of the races, said =
, "You know de turkey, lie reost on
fence, and de goose he roost on I
: ground. You pull de turkey off d
/ fence, and he Will cit up again. Yc
} crop his wings, but somehow or nudd,
J he's gwine to get back onosle fences
- L.