National Republican., 1874-05-08
MRS. CLARRS COSTUME.
WHAT A FRYING REPORTER SAW ANS
HEARD AT A COUNCIL OF FF--h

tssA Francisco Chrossn -nprl Ll'!
AT precisely f,fteen T-.-%Ses totwelve o'cloct
vestenaav an ..sSn1ated lady with the light o.
truth Sesmips on the end of her nose aud . big
bundle u-der her arm, skipped up the stairway
leass-g to Anthony's Hall. At the top of thu
s.sairway she was met by the "Vicegerent o
ef Christ, }" etc. Dr.. Pihkham, Ii. D., F. R
O., the great moral reformer of the age. Th'
Vicegerent greeted the attenuated female Will
holy smirk and a warm grasp of the hand
and after a moments sweet communion ush
cred her into the hall. The lady was the goo(
Mrs. Clark, champion of the dress reformers
and the bundle under her arm contained some
thing which she wished to show to the ladie
who were expected to be present in the hal
when she entered.
Having entered the room, Mrs. Clark OBJ
served with considerable chagrin that there
were but two persons present. One was lady
IN black, with wateTy eyes and silvery halr
The other was a Chronicle reporter, rathel
aWkwardly gotten up in female attire. Inc
latter wore q big hustle, three false curls, q
black alpaca dress and short jacket that dis
played his beautiful form to perfection. He
sat in fear and trembling lest his sex should be
discovered, but happily he escaped close scru-
tiny. Mrs. Clark mounted the platform, and
after waiting patiently, though in vain, for an
audience, proceeded to unite her bundle.
FIRST, however, she beckoned to DR.. Pink
ham. That celestial being came forward, and
tripping up to the platform, stood, with a
heavenly smile, awaiting orders. "Doctor," )" she
said, ''stand at the door please, and don't let
soul in the room. 1 am going to array myself
in my reform garments" The Adjutant OF
the Lord bowed, and, with a blush, departed
for the entrance. There he stood like a grim
sentinel. "Doctor," said the good Mrs. Clark,
'.you will please 60 outside the door. am
going to undress."
"Oh ~ said the worthy Doctor, and straight
way he went out with disappointed look.
When the good Mrs. Clark spoke Of undress-
ing, the Chronicle man thought seriously otbolt-
ing from the room, but Gs there was only one
other person in there he took good square
look at the lady and thought he could stand it,
Having seen that the Lords lieutenant was
well outside of the door, Mrs. Clark resumed
the untying of her big bundle.
81 have brought here, ladies'" she said "a
suit which have designed as the uniform of
the Order, and 1t is one that l should like to
have worL by every member on the occasion of
our parade on the Fourth Of July. In order
that you may see how it looks propose to put
it on"
With this Mrs. Clark removed her little
straw hat with its brown vail, united her lit
tie nsck-ribbon and proceeded to unbutton ter
dress The Chronicle mans breath came
Quick and sharp, but he resolved to stand it,
come what might. The cold perspiration stood
out on his forehead like moisture on a toad's
back; but the thick, spotted vail he wore
hid it from the gaze Of the othdr lady.
After some further fussing with the front of
her dress the good lady put her hand inside
and brought out something that looked like
rr1-itb
These she laid down on the little desk in front
of her. Then she thrust her hand inside
again and united whole lot of white strings
and things. Then, with little shrug of the
shoulders and quick squirm or two, her black
alpaca dress went back and the reporter caught
the dull gleam of bare arm and something
white around it. He covered his face with his
hands and held them there. He couldn't stand
it any longer. There was q rustling, thump-
ing about the platform, and finally a voice
which said, "There, ladies, now will put on
the garments of reform"
The reporter looked up and was inexpressi-
bly, shocked at the good Mrs. Clark's appear
aDce. She looked Ike white gaZelle. Her
form entirely divested Of outer garments resem-
bled in character that of a half-starved grey
hound; her limbs were like an antelope's
limbs, and her scanty white garments seemed
hardly big enough to envelope a tallow can
die.
~ will now put on the pantaloons," said the
good lady; and with this she sat down and
rather awkwardly shot one leg into them and
then the other. Fastening them around her
waist she put on a short calico skirt which
reached Just below the knee. Then thrusting
her arms into little jacket or coat, the novel
attire was complete. The trowsers were cut
straight and reached quite to the instep, and
they were made of some dark coarse material.
The good lady did not feel quite at home in her
new rig, for she went strutting about in pain
fully awkward way.
Having completed the change of toilet, the
good lady hammered on the desk, and the
Vicegerent entered timidly.
doctor, you may open the door noW," she
said.
In a moment half a dozen more ladies en-
tered and took seats. highly amused at the ap-
pearance of the apparition on the platform.
The half dozen ladies being seated, Mrs. Clark
proceeded in all solemnity with the business of
the day. After the reading of the minutes,
the lady read aloud the agreement, which she
invited those present to sign, viz: to adopt the
style of dress in which she then appeared, and
march in the procession with 1t on the Fourth
of July.
There was not single signature forthcom-
ing, and after some little time the good lady
with Z toss OF her head remarked that it was
evident the hearts Of those present were not in
the movement.
One very thin lady said she thought she
could hardly consent to wear the rig that Mrs.
Clark appeared in, hut she would like to have
4 little discussion about underclothes. There
was 10 doubt in her mind but there was much
room for improvement in the construction of
ladies' underwear. For her part she had al
ways worn carriers, but she believed that to
maintain the symmetry of the limb the
stockings should be buttoned to an elastic |
reaching to the cor
A Lady in Black (rising)-I always wear
mine fastened TO the dr.
Mrs. Clark (hurriedly)-Doctor, you can't |
come in Just now. You must not be here, sir. |
The Lords lieutenant had heard whisper |
of what was going on outside the door, and
had gl!ded in. He retired, much disappointed. |
"AsI was saying continued the thin lady, |
81 am violently opposed to having the younger |
portion Of society cramp its limbs with elastic |
gsrters. They should be worn with elastcs |
fastened at the waist"
The Lady in Black-As was saying, al |
ways wear mine buttoned right to the dr.
The Nrst Lady (interrupting) )-Nonsense. !
How do you keep them up?
The Lady in Black (maliciously) )-Oh! they |
stay up well enough on my limbs, though
hardly think, from appearances, that they |
would on yottFs.
The Thin Lady (angrily)-Indeed, Madam,
/ guess, if the truth was known, my lie
Mrs. Clark Trapping on the table)-The Ia |
dies will please maintain order. docking to- |
haIu Lne QOOT.) LIT. flEkuaUl, I've UOIQ you |
before that you can't be here. You must 60
out, cir.
One oE two of the ladies here looked up and
seeing the Vicegel ent, gave little scream, at
which that celestial being again withdrew with
q troubled look.
The Thin Lady (resuming) )-There is another
reform in underwear that IWould like to speak
of, and that is the sbolishing of the chemise.
There never was more useless garment worn
than that.
The Lady in Black (cruelly) )-Nonsense;
what would you wear instead!
The Thin LADY, wouldn't wear anything.
Chorus of Voices-0h, horrorl why, what
would we look likel
The Lady in Black (maliciously)-L
schooners scudding under bare
Mrs. Clark-Ladies, II we cannot arrive at
any conclusion with reference to these great re-
forms, think we had better adjourn until
next week.
At this iuneture melancholy looking lady
of about fifty, who had kept silent all through
the proceedings, arose and said that there was
another matter that she would like to bring
before the meeting, and that was a subject
which, if fully understood and rightly appre-
ciated, would make ladies supremely happy;
would end their greatest troubles; would
enahip them Tn keen their yOrth and heauty.