The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1874-07-10
We propose to fit up comfortable and

We propose to fit up comfortable and
even luxurious, accommodations in the
comet for as many persor as will honor
Us with their patronage, and make an
extended excursion among the heavenly
bodies. We shall prepare 100000 state
rooms in the tail Of the comet with hot
and cold water, gas, looking glass, para
chute umbrella, &c in eachl, and shall
construct more if We meet with sufiien-
tlv generous encouragement We shall
have billiard rooms, card rooms, music
rooms. bowling alleys and many spacious
theatres and free Libraries; and on the
main deck We propose to have Il driving
park. with upwads of 10000 miles Of
roadway in il. We shall publish daily
newspapers also.
DEPARTURE OF THE COMET.
The comet will leave New York a, ten
p. VI. on the Goth inst, and thrcforc it
will be- deSirble that the passengers be on
board BY eight at the latest 10 avoid
confuson in getting uder way. 1t Is not
known whether passports will be- nece>>-
arv or not, but il is deemed best that
passengers prvide them, and 80 guard
agaist all contingencies. No dogs will
be- allowed on beard. This rule has been
made in Difference to the existing state
of feeling regarding these animals and
will be strictly adhered To. The safety
of the passengers will in all ways be-
jcalously looked 10. A substantial iron
railing will be put all around the comet
and no one will be- allowed 10 go Ia the
edge and look over unless accompanied
by either my partner or myself.
THE POSTAL SERVICE.
Will be of the complcteSt character.
OF course the telegraph. and the telegraph
only, will be cmplyed, consequently,
friends occupying staterooms, 30,O0OOOO
miles apart, will be able Ia send message
and receive reply inside of eleven days.
Night messages will be- half rate. The
whole Of this vast postal system will b"
under the personal supcrntcndcncc OF
Mr.. Hale. of Maine. Meals served at all
hours. Meals served in statcroomS
charged extra.
Hostility is not apprhcndcd from any
great planet, but 1--WE have thaught
il best to err on the safe side, and there
fore have provided o proper number of
mortorS, siege iuns and boarding pixies.
History shows that small, isolated COM
munitics, such as the people Of remote
islands are prone 10 be hostile L. stran-
gers, and 50 the same may be- the |
case with
THE INHABITANTs OFsThRs
Of the tenth or twentieth magnitude
We shall in no case wantonly offend the
people of anv star, but shall treat all
alike with urbanitv and kindness, never
conducting ourselves toward an astcroId
after "A fashion which we could not ven
turc To assume toward Jupiter or Saturn.
! repeat that we shall not wanton offend
any star; hut at the same time We shall |
promptly resent any injury that may be- |
done us, or any insOlcncc offered u, by /
parties or governments residing in any |
star in the armament Although Rvcrsc /
TO the shedding of blood, we shall still |
hold this course rigidly and fcarlc,sly, |
not only toward single stars, hut toward |
consultations. We shall hope 10 leave II |
good impression of America behind us in .
every nation we visit, from Venus to |.
Uranus. And, at all events If we can /.
not inspire love we shall, at least, COM /
pcl respect for our country wherever We |
go. We shall take with u, free Of
charge,
4 GREAT FORCE OF MISSIONARIES
and shed the true light upon all the cc-
lrstial orbs which, physically aglow. are
vet morally in darkness. Sunday |
schools will b" established wherever
practicable. Compulsory education will
also be- introduced
The comet will visit Mars first, and .
then proceed 20 Mercury. Jupiter Ncnus
and Saturn. Partics connected with the .
Government of the District uf Columbia .
and with the former city government Of .
New York who may desire 20 inspect .
the rings will BE- allowed time and every .
facility. Every star Of prominent mag .
nitudc will be visited, and time allowed .
for excursions 10 points Of intcrc't IN /
land.
THE DOG STAR
has been stricken from the programme. .
Much time will be spent in tho Great .
Bear, and, indeed, in every constellation /
Of importance. So also. with the Sun /
and Moon and the Milky Way, other .
wise the Gulf Stream Of the sklcs. .
Clothing suitable for wear in the sun /.
should be provided. Our programm" has /
been 30 arranged that We -hall seldom /.
20 more than 100000 miles at II tim" /
without stopping at -ome -tar. Thls !
will necessarily make the .toppages fire.
qucnt and preserve the interest Of the |
tourist. Baggage checked through % !
any point on the route Partics desiring |
to make only Il part Of the proposed tpur
and thus save expense, may stop over at
any star they choose and wait for the re-
turn voyage
After visiting all the most celebrated
star. and cancellations in our system
and personally inspecting the remotest
parks that even the mot powerful tcl"-
-copcs can now detect in the armament
W" shall proceed with good heart
upon
4 STUPESDOUs VOYAGE.
Of discoveries among the cDuntless hurl-
ING worlds that make turmoil in the
mighty wbstes Of space that stretch their /
-olcmn solitude, their unimagsnabIe /
yastness billions upon billions of mile |
away upon the farthest verge Of t"Ie- |
scopic, till ~ comparison the little .
vault We used tO.gaze at on Earth, shall
seem like rendered phosphOscen fa.h of
spangles which some tropical yoyagve'
meow .tirred into life for a .inale instant, /