The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-05-30
CREAM OF OUR EXCHANGES.

Iuc lLtCiNlNNAbs, nuisance
in the experience Of World reporter who under
took 70 Interview the four great Greeley editors
Bowles, Watterson, Hastead and White, durln
their recent meeting in New York. As the re
porter sent up his card all the editors hea eA
cept Watterson, who stood his ground, but an
nounced himself as Halstead. In TINS l!ghI IN
interview. as given in the World next morning
was exceedingly laughabe. Halstead, who wa
an OLD Clay whig is made to perpctrate an eA
trayagant eulogy on Gen. Jackson, state righ'
and hard money; and in the conclusion conn
dentlialy informs the reporter that "atterson II
about to abandon his present calling ana deYotS
himself TO the opera bouhe.
Iowa editors are running sharp competition
with their brethren in Kansas in the matter o.
editorial amenities Recently the editor OF the
Nolnt Ayr Iowa) Journal, being a little put ou'
with .he Bedford Gowa) argus, took occasion
blandly 10 remark that the latter individual was
ga souirmipg squirt. chicken-h hearted youth,
diabolical iackassary, ape, hog, mulcn-stock ~
dog.fennel, tumble.bug, and toiling caterpillar.
The person thus addressed evidently hur' .!
these assertions, replied that the editor OF inc
Monnt AYR Journal was " all this and more too
and added that he was "the butcut OF original
sin the ouintessence Of double distilled nasti-
ness. foul bubble floating on the surface Of a
cesspool, dirty, NANCY dog and a foul disgrace
to his own feas'
Thirteen wears ago John Kendall, Of Alabama,
called Arthur Spooner 4 liar. Spoone- reflected
got mad. and The other day decided 10 shoot
Kendall for the insult, and did shoot him; and
now his honor shines like Z new Tin pan on a.
gate-pos;.
Snakes are said 20 be more numerous this year
thgn any season for years past. Allie White son
of Thomas White, on the lroquois recently klll.
ed two ball snakes measuring FIVE and q nan
and SIX feet long respectively and rattIe snake
seven years old. In town, the grass SNAKES are
quite pleIty.-hdEkdtfe Ga.
At Ia Sale snakes are said to be so plenty That
iots Of he natives are having them in :leir.
boots.
A CLinafran shot an American Eagle near Sac
ramep,o one day recently, and cooked and ate
the deceased monarch Of birds. few hours lat
err several patriotic citizens were Loyalty yelling
around 4 newly dug trench, and there was q dead
Chinaman 81 the bottom of i..-SdcrdHer.O ALgiS.
An indignast saloonatic vents his phclinX in
the following revised edition Of Mother Goose:
"RoCk ABLY baby high as the moon
Mother is out 70 the whisky saloon,
Father is trying 10 take few stitches,
TO close up the rear Of his every day breecAcf.
II.
"Pa. & cake, put cake poor little man,
Mother is praying as fast as she can.
Dear Mrs Winslow will put you 10 sleep,
And papa must hurry the kitchen 70 sweep.
"Tro;, ,ro. 10 Boston on q gray mare,
To Eea! an Old woman strike up new prayer, l.
Papa's new housewife s coming te-day,
Mamma can't tend TO her baby and pray.
"
" Lille boy blue" blow its poor nose,
Stockings are out az the heel and the toes
Papa is DINING his garments together,
For mother Is praying in all sorts Of weather.
A Vermont professor VINO was grea. eel.eYer
in tie power Of the human eye in 'ubcuins fero-
cious animals, had his faith somewhat shaken by
an experiment: with vicious bull. A local pa
per thus narrates the incident;
Surrounded by retinue Of disbelieyeTs, .he
scientific gentleman sauntered into the pastur
where the thoughtful bull was peacefully graz
ing, He liked upon the bull his eagle eye, but
the 'erogious old az imal Quailed not neither did
he retire in meodramatic order, but the last II
thing seen Of the professor was his archaeology !,
cal form tossed twenty-seven feet into the air
and coming down on the other side OF the fence.
His physical injuries were slight, buthis faith IN
scientific mesmer!sm, as Illustrated by bulls, has
been greatly weakened.
4 wyoming paper thought il shrewo dodge
TO announce that It's charges for marriage no
tees would be "just what the ecstacy Of the
bridegroom might prompt This worked
rp!enddly with those who paid cash at the time,
bat when they came to settle !hose notices MAT
were inserted on credit the amounts ran Dis.
couragingy below the regular rates; and, as
atoU, nine.tenths were on credit, that paper
changed It's tactics.
Oar friend Charley Dckey, who is now res.
ideui Of the Sandwich Islands, occasionally sends
us paper from that far OH region. In one Of
the latest received we find the editor has crap
pied the great financial problem which now
so largely occupies the press Of tie United
States and says:
80 Kawainni no ka oioi irur O Ike ka ana
hOOpku Ike cleo hOohole Americana e &C ahu in
Ia ono kanaka, ola hoi no hoale me ma hawaii
k&mailio lima ia halawal Ia; ma hooho liza Ia /
mCa.'
We commend these views to the careful cogi |
taton of the editor of the La Sale Frcs They
are quite as Ineligible as anything We have
ever seen in the Press on that subject.
In the Visitors Book at Niagara Falls, awcck or
two ago, some poetic genius wrote the following
lode 10 the Suspension Bridge"
Enormous siructur!
Whar did the constructors stand
As built this ERE?
Say gentle news.
Alas my news says nuflnE!
lmagnashun's hored,
! hcy it now!
They did it in balloons"
miliner and hair-dresser in Texas has hang
ing in her window the scalp Of young Indian
sluaw, with long black hair pendant. Anything
70 draw custom.
A gentleman Of Louisville, says the Coario.
JoarHa', has dog, pointer. The dog ran up
the steps Of a house and refused 10 come down.
His masterfollowed, and found "a Partridge on
the door plate This illustrates the force OF in.