The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-03-04

sometimes, F" said the English traveller, to
the lorfg bearded Californian who sat beside
him III the railway car, which was waiting for
an express trainaa adreary- docking Junction
" Sometimes life becomes such bore, that
one wotsl1 be glsd to get rid of ones self for
while..''
Never be tempted to do it, stranger"
said the Californian. It's deuced uncomfort-
able.
"What is it." said the Englishman.
"Being rid of ones SELF" said the Cali
fornian. "Oh, you laugh 1 was rid of my
self once. I'll tell you all about it. l went
to California twenty years ago to make my
fortune. | went to the diggins, of course,
and didn't find it. Then | went to business.
You don't want to hear about that l failed
there, too. | was head over ears in love.
Could not have the girl on account of the OBJ
jcctions Of her unreasonable old father, and
could not get either credit nor money. At
last, stranger l couldn't get a square meal at
any restaurant, and as true as you sit there
Could not get any tobacco. That finished me-
l sat with my head betweenmy hands think
ing about 1t, wondering what should next
do
When Chang Wang, my washerman,
brought my clothes home. he. walked into my
room with The fat basket, aid stood looking
at me in his blue frock with his queer, oblique
eyes.
"Chang Wang Nashy, washy belly good,''
he said holding out his hand.
"All right" Said, "put EN- DOWN"
"You pay Chang Wang; belly good,' he
said, shaking his head. ~
turned my pockets inside out.
Chang Wang Immediately remarked, no
money, no shirt. Good by and departed with
the clothes basket.
threw my slipper at him as he went out,
grinning amiably over his shoulder, and l
threw the other one at che door to shat it.
The door did not shut. got UP to see It, and
there in the crack lay something that kept the
door open. 1t was a pipe. Chang Wang's
pipe l knew it; he had dropped it.
Stranger, perhaps you've never been with
out smoke in your life. If you haven't you
can't understand my feelings.
knew that pipe had been between his
nasty yellow lips, but / didn't care. 1 put it
between my own. twas full l lighted it,
and lay down my back on the bed to smoke it
out, locking the door, SO that il he did come
back, Chang Wang would not enter.
Oh, dear, said to myself. Wen say oh,
dear anyhow; for all l know you may be a
parson. Oh, dear what blessed thing it
would be to get rid of myself just to slip
quietly into some one else's skin and Dodge
my creditors. To be changed, SO that the
tailor and the shoemaker wouldn't know me.
So that no little bill would ever come in to me
again; to begin life over again new man !
I'd shake hands with old Cloven-hoof. if he
would help me TO get rid of myself in that
way-by all that's most honest, | would, and
took a long Whit at my pipe.
Belly good, said a voice at my ear.
/ turned my head. There at my side stood
what I shall always believe to have been a
Chinese Devil He had the blue cottoh frock
and trowsers, the oblique eyes, yellow teeth,
and long pig tail, but he also had pair of
horns, gilt and tipped with red, long tail
like a monkey and cloven feet. He held out
his hand.
Belly good he said again, shake hands.
Who are you? Iasked.
S'pose you say you VANITY me, come said
the creature.
You VANITY be anozzer man--all right.
spozy Chang Wang come--no cap know.
All right.
| But YOU can't change me, said l.
Shake hands said eleven hoof.
/ Alright.
gave him my hand. In another minute
he dropped it.
Good-by, he said, and was off like shot
think he went through the floor; they al
ways do in plays, you know.
Yes. said the Englishnian. staring hard al
the Californian through his eyeglasses.
jumped off the bed as soon as he was
cone. said the Californian, but to my astonisl
ment found it wasn't such an easy matter az
usual Something had happened to my legs
thew were not pair, one was a good -dea
shorter than the other. l wore dressing
GOWN. too-a bright red one, with tassl
about the waist. I put my hand up to m.
face and felt an enormous beard, and II
another moment l saw that was in an offic
that I well knew-one situated in-stree
San Francisco. rushed to the looking gas