The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1874-06-18
For the anderson Mteligencer.
WILL1AMsTUN, June 18th.

MISTER EDIrUR-Kind Frend: Yu no
amt no skollar, and hav no talent wuth
namin, an what littel hav got, doan't lay in
ritin; but hav bin layin off to rite yu few
lines fur SUM time, but hav bin putin it auf
frum day tu day, expectin sumthin was goin
tu happin, frum the way things has bin
wurkin. Things is gttin in nifty alarmin
condishun over hear. doant no what has got
inter the peepul; but it pears tu me jest like
evry boldly wantid tu du sumthin smart, and
dident no jest exactly how tu 50 about it. An
it seames tn take the moast onreesonabulest
amount ov runnin round arter dark tu satisfi
EN-; and as you hav hearn, sum ov EN- aint
satisfde with trottin all over town an down tn
the mineral spring, but thay has tn 60 down
tn the ralerode culbert and craul iu amung the
"retreet" whar thay gose to at mite tu look at
the mune, listin tu the worter, an study Latin.
We hav got moar Sosieties hear than thare is
dass in the weak Thare is the Masuns, an the
Jerrycose, an the Batin Sosiety, an the Singin
Sosiety, an the Grangers, an menny more tu
teaiious tn menshun. Jest as sune as mite sets
in thay begins thare fuss. When the Masuns
coaxis sum poar creetur up stares, an makes
him ride the cote, and craul thru orger hole;
an when the Jerrycose gifts tu BLOWN thare
horns, an racin round; an the boys in the Ba-
tin Sosiety gifts tu rarin an chargin, and
stompin thare feat on the foar an the Singin
Sosiety foaks all lets luse at wunce, its rally
alarnin, for thay make dredfull fuss
But that aint morein haff Thay has got tu
be so unreasonable generally. Thay have got
feevur on EN- tu rite fur the papers, as eff thay
node moarn the editurs; and thay gifts so hard
up fur sumthin tn rite about that eff you put
up a new bench at the minerl spring, the hoal
ov the litterati ov the place grabs thare pens
an rites haff duzen pages ov fulescap paper
tu enuy edditur thay can git tu print it it,
whareby thay kill too birds with wun stoan-
that is, berralds the important infurmashun tu
prezent an future generashuns, an last, but not
leeste gifts thare produckshuns in the papurs,
an hav the Sublime satisfackshun of toatin
around copy and shown it tn thare friends,
an askn EN- how thay like it, who allweys
brags on it tu thare faces, an makes fun ov it
when thay are gone.
But the Grangers kinder take the rag often
the bush, as thay is leedin the balance purity
britc streeke, jest at prezcnt; perhaps bekause
thay meets the oftinest Thay ondoutidly do
power ov sumthin, as thay meats three or
fore times a weak. Over Changers have bin
behavin thareselves very we'll, so far; but l
am satisfde that sum ov thare brethren has
bin cuttin up purity considerable, as l see that
on the fust day of this month the Reformed
Presbyterian Synnod ov Filadelfy desidcd that
they wood not let Grangers jne tharc church.
But hav hcarn that thay has one very inter
restin feetur about EN-. Thay say that they all
throw in and git up big supper every month
1 hearn feller what had give lean on his
crop tn git pervishuns tu du him till next fall,
singin song, which l tuck the lbberty tu
remember tu the best ov my feebul ability
He sung it tn the tune "I want tn be angll,
and he rally looked like he meant it. Heare
it is:
TIE LEAN MANS WISH.
want tn be granger,
And with the grangers stand;
To ware linnen apurn,
discount in my hand.
Oh, thsre before my Mastur,
Idle uso boath tung and pen
Tu sound over orders try-ulnph
Ovor hoggish "middel men,"
kno Tmc poar and neady,
But lie git outin that;
Repudiate, begin life anew,
AN buy granger hat"
Tide ride half fair on ralerodcs,
Talk farmin by NEAR roat,
Git treetid by the candydates
Who want the Oranges voat.
I'de by my goods in Charlestin,
Git prices put low doun,
And sell my crap ov coffin
At thirty cents pound
Tde git return commisshuns
On cvry bail sent,
And when pade my frate bill,
Discount it ten per cent.
Ide ordir me sum cmmergrants
Who amt afearod ov wurk,
An let the lazy niggers
Take up thare beds an walk;
And when inside my pocket
No grcenbacks I Good feal,
Tde order things by holesail,
An fix tho Oranges seal.
There wus sum moar ov it, but doan't reck-
erlcct it now will git him to sing it agin,
and send you the balence. l am goin tu try
tu cit a invertashun tu the next supper, and
will tell yu all about it.
Till then l rename your tru friend,
10. KERR
The Washington correspondent of the
Charleston Ne,rs and Courier has this comment
upon South Carolina affairs before Congress
"Thc majority report of the judiciary committee