Middletown transcript., 1874-08-15
Scottish Aneodo otes.


acter," from the pen of De An Ramsay, we
find the following numerous illustrations ::
''Some years ago, when it was not an
uncommon thing, even in Scotland, for
challenges to be given and accepted for
insults, or supposed insults, an English
gentleman was entertaining a party at In
verness with an account of the wonders he
had seen and the deeds he had performed
in India, from whence he had lately ar
rived. He enlarged particularly upon the
size Of the tigers he had met with at diff
ferent times in his travels, and by way of
corroborating his statements, assured the
company that he had shot one himself con-
siderably above forty feet long A SCOT
tish gentleman present, who thought these
narratives rather exceeded a travellers al
lowed privileges, coolly sa ID that no doubt
those were very remarkable tigers; but
that he could assure the gentleman there
were in that northern part of the country
some wonderful animals, and as an exam
pie he cited the existence of skate fish
captured off Thurso, exceeding half-an-
acre in extent. The Englishman saw this
was intended as sarcasm against his own
story; so he left the room in indignation,
and sent his friend to demand satisfaction
or an apology from the gentleman who
had, he thought, nsulted him The mar
rator of the skate story coolly replied,
Weel, sir, gin yer freend will tax few
feet aft the length O his tiger, we'll see
what can be dune about the breadth O. the
skate
" The parishioners of a clergyman in
Scotland, in expressing to him their aver
sion to the use of manuscript sermons.
urged: What gars ye tax up your bit
papers to the pu'pit?' Fl E replied that it
was best, for really he could not remem-
Der his sermon, and must have his paper.
Weel, weel, minister, th en- dinna expect
that ce can remember them
" A late Duke of Athole had invited a
well-known character, a ritter of Perth
to come up and meet him at Dunkeld for
the transaction of some business. The
Duke mentioned the day and hour when
he should receive the mar of law. who ac-
cordingy came punctually at the appoint
ed time and place But the Duke had
forgotten the appointment and gone to the
hill, from which he could not return for
some hours A Highland der present de-
scribed the Perth writer's indignation and
his mode of showing it by a most elaborate
course of swearing. But whom did he
swear at? was the inquiry made of the
narrator, who replied, Oh, he didna
swear at ony thing part cular, but JUST
stude in ia middle of ia RI bad and swoor at
large
/" A Scotch lad came to his clergyman
for examination previous 10 his receiving
his first communion The pastor, know
ing that his young friend vas not very pro-
found in his theology, and not wishing to
discourage him, took the Old Testament,
and asked him. in referen ce 10 the Mosaic
law, how many commandmen there were.
After little thought, he put his answer
in the modest form of a supposition, and
replied, cautiously, 'Aiblins* hummer
The clergyman was vexed, and told him
such ignorance was intolerable, that he
could not proceed in examination, and that
the youth must wait and learn more; so
he went away. On returning home, he
met friend on his way to the manse, and
on learning that he too was going to the
minister for examination, shrewdly asked
him, Weel, what will W say moo if the
minister speers hoo mony commandments
there are?' Say! why, shall say ten
to be sure To which the other reoined,
with great triumph, Ten Try yo him
wi ten, | tried him wi hummer, and
he wasna satisfied
1.-The old generation Of Galloway lairds
were primitive and ho4pitable race, but
their conotciality sometimes led to awk-
ward occurrences. In former days, when
roads were bad, and wheeled vehicles al
most unknown, an old laird was returning
from supper party, with his lady mount
ed behind him on horseback On cross
ing the river Urr, at a ford at point
where it joins the sea, the old lady dropp-
ed off, but was not missed till her hus-
band reached his door, when, of course,
there was an immediate search made The
party who were despatched in quest of her
arrived just in time to find her remon-
strating with the advau cling tide, which
trickled into her mouth, in these words,
No anither drap; neither bet nor cauld.'
:" 1t seems that certain country girl
in Scotland thought it quite possible that
there might be an excess in scrupulous re-
gard to appearances. On her marriage
day, the youth to whom she vas about to
be united said to her, in triumphant
tone, 'Weel, Jenny, haven't l been unco
ceevil,' alluding to the fact that during
their whole courtship he had never even
given her kiss Her quiet reply was,
"Ou, ay, man; senselessly ceevil'
" There was certain Daft Will Speir,
who was privileged ha inter of Eglng-
ton Castle and grounds. He was discov-
cred by the Earl one day taking a near
cut, and crossing fence in the demenss
The Earl called out, Come back sir
that's not the read DO you ken said
Will, 'whaur I'm gaun ? No. replied
his lordship. 'Weel, hoo the dell do ye