Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1874-09-10
That Jack of Clubs.


He was well dressed and said he came
from Cincinnati He looked like a drum
mer for a prosperous dry-gOOds house
except that the diamond pin he wore was
larger and was more pretentiOusly dis
PLAYED even than is the custom OF these
peripatetic gentry And, besides, he
didn't seem more than half-witted, any
how, for all the good clothes and the dia-
mond pin and the latest fall style white hat
he wore. TO the loafers and others who
stood around the bar-and a good many
regulars" who were hanging around on
the sidewalk had lounged in when they
heard the loud talk-he seemed like q
young fellow on his first spree, who had
more money than he knew what to do with
He wasn't very drunk when ne first
came in but he was very loud with his
talk. He asked everybody up to take a
drink, and the loafers didn't need any
pressing In point of fact, there wasn't
one of them that didn't take drink.
Theirs were big drinks; but the CinCin-
natl mans wasn't more than one finger
and he left some in the bottom of his
glass. But it seemed to fly to his head,
Notwithstanding.
1t was an uptown saloon, and at the
beginning of the packing season,
when the hog-raisers were driving in their
gruntcrs There were three or four of
'em in the saloon at the time taking a lit
tie Robertson County in a group by them
selves They didn't drink with the Gin
Cinnati man, but the StOck-raiser who
was treating his party paid for their
drinks and showed Il well-tilled pocket
book as he did it. After that the Cincin-
natl man was inclined to be friendly
with the hog-drovers but he didn't neg
lect the loafers for all that. He wanted
everybody in the room to drink with him
again. The regulars stepped up prompt
II, but the cOuntrymen declined. The
Cincinnati man pressed them to drink
with him. He had dead loads of money
about him. He was on little spree, re
CARELESS of expense. So they must drink
with him.
He was so polite and liberal, and
seemed to be so anxious, that the drOvers
each took a drink The regulars had all
poured out theirs, and had gulped 'em
down while the talk was going on. The
countrymen each took the usual horn,
but the Cincinnati man poured out two
fingers this time, and didn't drink more
than half of that. But he seemed to be
getting drunk fast
Then he treated all round again, and
though his drink was very small CON
sidering, it began to thicken up his talk
a little.
Less take mother glass, gentlemen"
said he and he diyed down in another
pocket and drew out big roll of bills
There's huff money to treat whole
town, and blamed if | amt goin' spend
all it fore get through"
So they all drank around with him
again, and his tongue was getting sur
ul, I,at I,n I,,'t
taken enough liquor to make a cat drunk
that is to say Kentucky cat, which is
supposed to be used to it. But then he
was a simple sort of fellow, whose head
didn't seem to be of the strongest. As
for the loafers, they were not phased in
the least, and no more were the country
men.
Now, gen'lmen, less have mother
drink anil show you trick with cards.
Say, barkeeper, han out deck cards"
The gentleman behind the bar took
down pack of cards and gave it to the
Cincinnatian, whose big roll of money
still lay on the counter
GenTmen," said the stranger, who
by this time was getting drunk very fast ;
. genlmen, III bet $50 can do a trick
with cards none you can fin out. But
less take mother drink first" So they
all drank round with him again. and the
loaferS and countrymen gathered about
him as he clumsily shuffied the paste
boards, nodding sleepily toward the
counter every once in a while Then he
tried to do several tricks with the cards,
which were very transparent indeed. AS
each of his tricks was successfully de-
tected by both loafers and countrymen
he began to get mad.
Blame f can't do one thing" said
he ut last, "none you can fin out. lean
I'll any card n pack you name, n not
lalf try. Bet ten dollar can cut any card
pack" he repeated, and drew a $40 bill
rom the big roll on the counter. 1t was
yident that he was very drunk.
Then the loafers gathered by them
elves in a corner and there was a hur-
q comparing of finances, but there
ISN'T as much as ten dollars in the
ovid.
Bet twenty dollar can cut any card
pack" but nobody saw the raise; the
1afcrs looked longingly toward the pile,
nd then started for the door, as by a
iden impulse.
somehow, although he was very drunk,
Cincinnati man addressed himself
together to the droyers. and especially
the one who had already exhibited
portlv pocket-book. If he hadn't
n so drunk and so innocent-looking
Iarp one might think he was making
aad-set at that green Countryman.
What is it you want to bet?" said that
vidual.
Wanner bet ff' dollar can cut any
a in the pack, replied the light-head-
man from Cincinnati.
Any keard | choose to pick out?'
ed the drover.
Yes, any card in pack" reiterated
welLdressed man from Cincinnati
an acute and unprecedented looker-or
hit have noticed that his eyes began &c
bright as the big diamond that
kled on his bosom, which was very
age, considering that he was drums
that his tongue was so thick. But
ountrymen failed to see this, and
ne with the money was particularly
Said he:
9y, here, stranger; you bet fifty dol
hat you kin cut any keard l name
at thar pack?'
es'r," replied the stranger, and his
egan to grow sleepy again; "I'll
hunerd dol'r can,
III, now, stranger" returned he