Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1874-07-25
HENRY AS AN ACTOR.


the difficulty of acquiring correct relig-
ious habits, and the comparative ease Of
maintaining them when once they have
become second nature. "Many may
look upon religion" he said, as an
insurance policy against final loss by
fire." He described that kind of relig-
ion so funnily that the congregation
laughed outright. "They go to church
every Sunday" he said, palling his coat
close around him, drawing his face down
dolorously, and rolling up his eyes.
The hymns are doled out to them, q
good, sound, dry sermon is preached to
them, and the most eloquent passage of
all is their going out. They attend
prayer meetings, too - most dismal
prayer meetings Here his lower jaw
dropped, more of the whites of his eyes
showed, and his hands were clasped be-
fore him. "There are some comforta-
bic things in Greenwood, but none in
one OF those prayer meetings. They 90
through the exercises solemnly, and the
brethren try to say something-they do
say the same things they have been say
ing twenty years. Then the services
are mercilessly cut short, and they go
gloomily home"
After describing true religion as some
thing Independent of forms and cate.
chisms, Mr.. Beecher illustrated the pro-
cess of its practical requirement. He
held an invisible fiddle, lingering the
strings with one hand, drawing the bow
with the other, and adjusting the imag
mary instrument under his chin, while
he said: Have you ever seen boy
trying to learn to fiddle? don't won
der they call those strings catgut. I
should say that the spirits of all the
dead old cats were in them. But when
the boy masters it" stopping short,
he commenced to fiddle gracefully, like
a good violinist. Then he showed how
a man learns to set type, the desk fur
nishing the case, from which he slowly
and awkwardly carried the letters to
suppostitious composingstick, spelling
out audibly s-h-a-d. When the congre-
cation had stopped laughing, he gave
the rapid motion of the samo man after
his trade had been learned. "I was
taught elocution," he said, although
you might not think it. I was drilled
in all the gestures"
He made the prescribed gestures and
struck the attitudes in awkward but
rapid succession, and then did them
gracefully, in the style of speaker to
whom they had become habitual and
unstrained. "We try to be graceful"
he said, "we can't be. All those
things come by long and persistent
usage, and then without thought. In
the country where board six inches
wide is laid in the mud, man will
walk it without effort and never step
off. Taking his place at one side Of
the platform, he walked easily in an
exact line to the other side, with his
hands in his pockets and his eyes wan
dering carelessly. Now" he went
on, "put that board at height of fif-
teen feet, and not one man in q dozen
can walk the length of it without fall
ing Off" Taking his position as before,
he fixed his eyes in front of him rs
though on the elevated board, looked
scared, and commenced the imaginary
passage. Wavering and balancing with
his arms extended, he with difficulty
got halfway across, and then stumbled
as though falling. The people laughed
ont loud at the elaborately perfect pan
tomine.
The greatest hit, however, was the
droll mimicry of a miser, who resolved
upon reform and began by releasing
mortgage on a poor mans farm. The
counterfeit severity of the miser in de-
manding payment, the fright of the
debtor, the blandness of the miser in
presenting the Cancelled document, and
the joyous antics of the debtors wife
and children, were all produced with
the skill of a trained comedian. Fin
ally, when Mr. Beecher as the reformed
miser, with benevolent smile on his
face, mounted his horse and rode off
bending his parted knees and swaying
his body in exact imitation of q rider,
and cutting behind with an imaginary
whip-everybody laughed until the
| tears came
THE LAST oman GETS" MAD.-As the
8 o'clock train left town last night the
inevitable "last man" made his ap-
pearance at the corner of Union and G
streets. He had no more than marked
the train moving away, and got his
mouth into swearing shape, before both
his heels flew, and he took seat upon
the cold, cold ground with such EN-
phasis that his plug hat bounced some
feet into the air. In trying to save his
hat his valise escaped, and went shoot
ing down the steep cross street. He
sat moment and gazed at the retreat
ing train, the last car of which was just
crossing the lower part of the street in
which he was seated, when he made a
few profane remarks, which may be thus
represented: " LL!-!-!-!-LL!-LL!-
~" but nothing that could be called