davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15
FOR THE LEGIsEATURE.
For the Legislature.

-Nr. Editor PLEASE announce Judge b.
G. FREDICK, of the Fork, Candidate for
the Legislature at the oming election and
obligc.
MANY FRIENDS.
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

STsya Leslie, of land eognmission notoriety---
asrsSysho stayed GHny from Barnwell until just
tho other day, is stumping that County for
tho Legislature
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Editorial notices have become SO common
that people do not pay much attention TO
them amy more but we shall, nevertheless,
give that s,aunch old firm, j. Mcnamara, :,
this passing squib. I,isgj"st iii store at
which to obtain good a\,icles in MI lines at
fair prices. And the bcst of it is. you will
be dealt with honestly. Give Me call
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Mr.. p. NJ. Gcueral is candi,latc for
School Commissioner. He is a young man
of considerable intelligence ana is n hard
working Republican.
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Moses will commission men yho will
swoGrcto vote for him. Willie find fifteen
in osengeburg. t
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Mqsesasays if lis -quarrels with his ap
pointeesss should rip up old stories he will
help them with q lie or two additional.
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15
Notice of Dismissal.

Notice is hereby given to all concerned
that on the 9th day of August, 1874, will
File my final account as Guardian of Ellen
ora l.. Renz and Alice T. Rentz in tho Pro.
bate Court of Orangeburg County and win
Petition for my final discharge.
JOHN E. HARVEY,
july 25-4t Guardian.
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Parties have Gsen cnpcassng all the
"eekSssEo whiakey used. Missionary pa
pers distributed -
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

ME Bronson has fine cotton adjoining his
garden. lie is good for u bale to The acre
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Last week was the hottest VIC ever felt.
Oh for an ice house!
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Who brayed on Monday last Sec f. Il.
McKiniay.i
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15
Who is the lighting editor of tho Free

- IL IL
Sgseo notice of resumptiop of Miss
Evans Primary Schpol on Tuesday,
1st. September. "a q
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Mr. -. nast annouAccs Aim,clr for
Sheriff.
1tt
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Who is the ring master: Is it Greek:
The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-08-15

Ley us all come together, aud wo; K for
one common end We cu,,iot afford to
split now.
Who is the ring master? Is it Greek.
Who brnyed on Monday last. Sec +. X.
McKiniay.i
Last week was the hottest VIC ever felt.
oh for an ice house
--------.==z=z,l - -ezz.=u.----
Mr.. J.S Rast annouaccs himself for
Sheriff.
Nh Bronson has fine cotton adjoining his
garden. lie is good for u bale to the acre.
Mqsesssay if iis.quarrcls with his ap.
pointeesS should rip up old stories he will
help them witll.a lie or two ad,lition,l.
-->-7---------aassEzzos.-. <zzra=s------
Moses will commission men Yho will
swcaeto vote for him. willh find fifteen
in osangeburg. -
T-EE----EZS.-.. @zzzaa
Parties have Gsen cnucassing all The
aeeE:aNo whiakcy used Missionary pa
pers distributed. -
Mr.. =. NJ Gcueral is candidate for
School Commissioner. He is young man
of considerable intelligence ana is n hard
working Republican.
<zaas.. :.
Mr.. Adde Ransdslc, opposite Mr. Frantz
Briggnahp, a Keeps aa3aice grocery papd deals
honestly with his customers. Give him a
call.
;sgga teslie,of land eommission noloriety--,
'rssysao stayed ERay FROM. Barnwell until lust
tho other day, is stumping that County for
Tho Legislature.
The editor of the Lexington Dispatch and
The quill driver Of the Abbcvilo IRedium
are having quarrel through their rcspcc-
live journals. "a woman is OF tho bottom
'fMgllEl!A.!l...A q Ia =
Mr.. G. Boliver, keeper of the County
Toor House says lie will not give Moses
} quersers atsthat place. Tho jailor will take
charge of him at the January term Of Court.
vide.Buuzs II
game of base ball was played on Tues.
day Inst between the Swamp Angels and
IL =, -ihs. : -
Orange Cldbs Tie lattsF won II to Is.
There are two more games to be played be-
fore the championship, will be decided.
<. RsFa1e i i . t.S z s q,
We shall always be ready to join in the
prevailing opinion, tbStithOEpublio schools
which have produced SO many eminent
Z characters in Europe, are the best adapted
10 the genius and constitution of The Anicri-
canpeoplc.s
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

never yet heard man or woman much
abused, that was not inclined to think the
better of them, and to transfer my suspicion
or dislike to the person who appeared to take
delight in pointing out the defect of fellow
creature.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

The essence of true nobility is the neglect
of self. Let the thought of self pass in and
the beauty of a great action is gone, like the
bloom from soiled lower.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

"Gracious me - exclaimed lady in a wit
ness box, show should / know anything
about anything l don't know anything
about" That's just what we would like to
know.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

A paragraph in Milwaukee paper reads !:
ga thunder storm made Beranger poet, a
mothers kiss made West a painter, and sal
airy of four dollars week makes us Journal
ist." Brains must be dug out there.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

To say that unkindness has not been meant,
is but to shift the charge from one to another
vital point in the character of a friend.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

A bare-headed, bare-footed little boy aston
ished worshiping congregation in Massa-
chusetts town, on a recent Sunday, by rushing
into church and exclaimipg, "Where's my
papa? The pigs are out /"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

How polite some persons are apt to be
when they have done you wrong. Such po-
likeness is only adding insult to injury
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16
MAKES THE WEAK STRONG.

The PeruviG,s Syrup, q Protect
Iron, Is SO combined as to hare
the character. of an oJin2eft, as
easily digested and nsSinsiL0teI
aCith the blood as the simplest
food. 1T increases the quantity
of Natures Oacn VitdLisi,sO
agent, IRON i11 the blood and
cares 'sa thousand ills, J" simply
6y T01.i1sg st1,, I,svigordti1sg and
TitaIiSi7sD the System. The en-
2'iched and UitdLiSed blood per-
nseateS eUefy part of the b0tlY.
repairing damages and aCaste,
searching out morbid secre-
tons; s ss;s tearing nothing for
disease to feed stpop.
This as the secret of the 7UO71-
de1Jat success of this remedy i's
curing Dyspepsia, Liver Com
plant, DrOpsy, Chronic Diar-
rhoea, Boils, Nervous Affections,
Chills and Feyers, Humors,
Loss of Constitutional Vigor,
Diseases of the Kidneys and
Bladder, Female Complaints,
and all diseases originating ias
~ Ottet otttcC VI tfeC OtOOtbs Ut &c
c0mp0asied by debility or o. J0sv
state of the system. Being free
from -Atcohol, IN any form, its
enerOiSilsJ effects are not fol-
tOsOed by corresponding reac-
ton, bat are permanent, iafas-
sing strength, Gig0r, and 7seaU
life into all parts 0fthe system,
and building atl1 an IRON Com
StitsIti0n.
Thousands haze been c7sG,sgeI
by the use of this remedy, from
aOe0kc, SicicJy, sMJferi7a0 c7.e0-
tt,'es, to strong. healthy, aud
happy men and aU0gneas; and
a7aU0tidS cannot hes
state to Ojve IL a trial.
See that each bottle has PERU.
WAN SYRUP 6loacas ias the glass.
Pamphlets Free.
SETH W. F0WLE & SONS, Proprietors,
No. Milton Place, Boston.
SOLD DIX DRUGGISTS GENERALLY.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

The remark of little eight-year-old, on
hot afternoon lateley, was in accordance with
the wish of many persons. Mother,n he
said, 81 wish was built like hen-coop, out
oflaths, and then the breeze could blow right
through me-"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

The fool seeketh to pick fly from a mules
hind leg. The wise man letteth out the job
to the lowest bidder.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

Many ladies who profess an enthusiastic love
of nature, sit in the parlor as if expecting him
to make call.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

If we wait until it is perfectly convenient,
half of the good actions of life would never be
accomplished.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

a little boy disputing with his sister ex-
claimed, "Tis true, for ma says so and, if
ma says SO, it is so, if it amt so''
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

BE not angry that you cannot make others
as you wish, since you cannot make yourself
as you wish to be.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

He who cheerfuly commits the universe t.
God has nothing in the universe to fear.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

A sick man covered with mustard plasters,
said, eff | were to eat loaf of bread, |
should be walking sandwich"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

James Gray, of Vermont, wrote her 81 low
you as the tempest loves the placid lake !; ;
and now she is obliged to sue him for breac
of promise.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

When Mississippi paper tells of man of
eighty being g stricken down in the prime of
life" we'd like to know what old age is in
that State.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

1t is doubtless true that more people have
been killed celebrating the Fourth of July
than were killed in the Revolutionary war.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

Not single book agent was blown up on
the Fourth, and not a peddlar has been struck
by lightning. Reflections like this rob us OF
resignation.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

A Watervillian killed 1000, 2S9 potato
bugs in one day and has not been strong
enough to tell the truth since.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16
MISCELLANY.

DO not wear furS In August.
How to raise dinner-Go to see.
Borrowed umbrellas are cheapest
How can a man be square all roundP
To keep dog-Preserve him in alchol.
Rakes flourish most in the hayday of youth
Never rub your eyes with your elbows
The best thing for Fresh Cold-Get il
cured.
A patch over the eye will disguise anybody.
The softest water is caught when it rains
hard.
When ignorance is bliss, tits folly to be
otherwise.
one-legged soldier ought to be remem-
bered.
Never go into the water until you learn to
swim.
Experience is torch-light in the ashes of
our delusion.
First law of gravity-Never laugh at your
own jokes.
Whenever business falls off it always seems
to get hurt.
You can't easily vex candle, though you
may put it out.
"Kidnap'' is from "kid y child, and
"nab p to snatch away.
A lie which is part truth is ever the
BLACKLIST of lies.
Cruelty can make foes faster than power
can Stay them.
For cheap watering place there is nothing
like hydrant.
Division among families is an unpleasant
sort of arithmetic.
You should not stone your neigbbor, but
you may rock his baby.
To tell our secrets is folly to divulge those
of others is treachery.
They have no Mr.. or Mrs. in Iceland 1t
is only 1ngibjorg and Valverdr.
1t is better to fall out with your banker
than to lose your balance with him.
Ice water is dangerous, if drank in guam
titles of gallon or over at time
Always be temperate in diet. Our first
parents ate themselves out of house and home.
1t is strange fact that wise men learn
more from. fools than fools do from wise men.
The oil wells Of Western Pennsylvania
spout out easily to the extent of about forty
thousand barrels.
The contributions for religious charities in
England for the year 1868 amounted to over
$4,000, 900 in gold.
A Watervillian killed 1,000,987, 2S2 potato
bugs in one day and has not been strong
enough to tell the truth since.
II is doubtless true that more people have
been killed celebrating the Fourth of July
than were killed in the Revolutionary war.
A sick man covered with mustard plasters,
said, eff | were to eat loaf of bread, |
should be a walking sandwich"
-
When Mississippi paper tells of man of
eighty being i" stricken down in the prime of
life, we'd like to know what old age is in
that State.
Not single book agent was blown up on
the Fourth, and not a peddlar has been struck
by lightning. Reflections like this rob us OF
resignation.
James Gray, of Vermont, wrote her Is / love
you as the tempest loves the placid lake
and now she is obliged to sue him for breacl
of promise.
He who cheerfully commits the universe t
God has nothing in the universe to fear
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

The contributions for religious charities in
England for the year 1868 amounted to over
5000, 600 in gold.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-09-16

The oil wells of Western Pennsylvania
spout out easily to the extent OF about forty
thousand barrels.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-06-12
The Fel1o.O that Looks Like Ne.

Max Adeler, who writes for a Philadelphia Ia
paper, has a friend named Simmer, who
deserves pity. He was going up to Read
ing the other day, and upon reaching the
depot he happened to look into the ladies'
room. A lady sat there with lot of bag
gage and three children, and when she
saw Simmer she rushed at him. and be
fore he could defend himself she flung her
arms about his neck, nestled her head
| upon his breast, and burst into uears.
! Simmer was amazed, indignant, confound-
! ed e; and ere he could find utterance for his
! feelings, she exclaimed:
''Oh, Henry, dear Henry! We are uni
| ted at last. Are you well? 10 aunt Mar
tha still alive? Havsn't you longed to
see your own Louisa 7''
And she looked into Slimmers face and
smiled through her tears
Madame said he solemnly, 'sf l am
the person alluded to as Henry, permit me
+ to say that you have made mistake. My
name is Lemuel, have no aunt Martha,
and 1 don't own a solitary Louisa. Oblige
me by lotting go my coat; it sxcites re-
mark"
Then she buried her bonnet deeper into
his waistcoat, and began to cry harder
than ever and said:
ooh, Henry, how, how can you treat me
sof How can you pretend you are not my
husband ?'
Madame" screamed Simmer, eff you
do not cease sopPing my shirt bosom, and
remove your umbrella from my corn, shall
be obliged to call the police. Let me go,
I say
''The children are here" she persisted.
you children ?"
Eyes, yes" they exclaimed, 'ft's pa,
it. onr dear pa"
And then they grappled Simmer by the
trowsers' leg and hung to his coat tail.
woman ~ he shrieked, 'this is getting
serious. Unhand me, say"
And he tried to disengage himself from
her embrace-while all the brakemen, aud
the baggage master, and the newsboys
stood around, and said his conduct was in
famous. In the midst of the struggle
stranger entered with carpet bag. He
looked exactly like Slimmer-and when he
saw his wife in SINNERS arms he became
excited, and foored Simmer with that
carpet bag, and sat on him, and smote his
nose, and caromed on his head, and asked
him what he meant. Simmer was re-
moved on stretcher, and the enemy went
off with his wife and family in a cab. He
called next day to apologize. His wife had
made the mistake because of Slimmer's s
likeness to him. And now Simmer wishes |
he may soon be kicked in the face by a |
mule, so that he will resemble no other
human being on earth.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-06-12

OLD WEAsEL's LAST POKER HAND. -
The best poker hand we ever heard ol
was held by old Weasel the other night
! Weasel didn't know much about poker,
| but he wanted to learn, and every now
and then (the party was playing euchre
/ he would show his cards and ask if that
wasn't good hand. Once or twice he
bet, but somebody always beat him be
cause he knew so little about the game
After while, as Weasel was dealing, ano
when he had thrown three cards around
+ % each one, he stopped and looked at his
three. He looked good while. Then he
got excited.
''NOw 1 know this is a good hand
I've learned something about poker in
the last two hours, and III bet S25 on
these cards. It's just the best hand
ever saw"
Jones had beaten Weasel on this sort of
banter already, and so be took up his
cards. de had three aces-a pretty good
hand for three cards. Nobody could have
full of fours, and his threes were tho
biggest in the deck. He bent a pitying
smile on old Weasel, and said : Il think
I've got something pretty good here, but
l couldn't bet less than $40 on it. We're
not playing poker, you know, and these
outside issues are irregular. 1 bet $50
''Done p said old Weasel ''What have
you got ?''
They put up their money, and then
Jones showed his hand.
Here's three aces, you old mutton
head You can't beat that with any
three cards on earth. You ought to know
better than to-
''Hold on cried old Weasel, throwing
down the king, ten, and seven of hearts.
That's flush, ain t it When you've
got all of suit that's flush, believe and
a flush always beats threes. don't know
much about poker, but it seems to me
I've got the best hand out of jail"
Jones had forgotten about hushes. In
fact, the whole party rather underrated
old Weasel because he was religious man
and not supposed to know anything about
cards. But they kept a very watchfuI eye |
on him after that, and when he spoke OF
poker hands they all insisted on sticking /
to the game they were playing.-N o.
Picayune.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-06-12
AGRICULTURE 4 FRAUD.

The Cincinnati Times thus humoreusIv
: goes for Agriculture
! The best fraud of earth IS Agriculture
! The deadliest ig1sts f1tg5ts that ever e,Iit
| tered to begtiile arddazzled to betrav is A o
| liculture. l speak with feeling on the
subject for l have been glittered and he
| guided, and dazzled. and DESTROYED by
I this same arch deoeivsr
| No wonder Gaia killed his brother. He
was tiller of the ground. The wonder iq
that he didn't kill his father, and then
WePt because ne hadn't grandfather to
| xiii. No doubt his Early Rose potatoes for
which he paid Adam 81 a barrel, had beer
cut down by bugs from the headwaters of
the Euphrates. His PENNSYLVANIA ybeat
had been winter killed and wasn't worth
cutting. His Norway oats had gone to-
straw, and would not yield five pecks per
acre, and his black Spanish water-melons
hao oeen stolen by boys, who had pulled
! upthe vines, broken down his pateut nicLet
fence, and written scurriIous doggorv ali
over his back gate. No wonder he feIt
/ mad when he saw Abel yvhistlinor alone
| with ms iinc French merinoes worth eight
! dollars head, and wool going M evSrU
Gay- NO wonder he wanted to XIII som e
Dody' ana thought he d practice on Abel.
and Noah. S getting drunk was not at All
surprising. He had become q husband
man. He had thrown away magnificent
opportunities. He might have had a mo-
nopoly OF any profession or business. Had
ne studied medicine there would not havo
been another doctor within a thousand
miles to call him 'Quack - and everv
family would have bought a bottle Of
'.Noah's Compound Extract Of Gorber
Wood and Anti-Deluge Syrup As a no
Htlclan, he might have carried his own
ward solid, and controlled two-rhirds of
the delegates to every convention. As
lawyer, he would have been retained in
every case tried at the Ark High Court Of
Admiralty. But he threw all these adyau-
tages and took to Agriculture. For a Ions
time the ground was so wet he could raise
nothing but sweet flag and bullrushes. and
these at last became drug i'll the market.
W hat wonder that when he did get a
halt-peck of grapes that were not stuns 70
death by Japhet's honey bees, he sb0uId
have made wine aud drowned his sorrows
in Glowing BOWL
The fact is, Agriculture would demoraT-
ize a saint. l was almost a saint when I
went into it; I'm a demon now. 1 FIGHT
myself out Of bed at four O'Clock, when ALI
my better nature tells me to lie till seven.
1 tight myself into the garden to work like
a brute, when reason and instinct tell ms
to stay IN the house and enjoy myself like
a man. l fight the pigs, ard chickens, the
moles, the birds, the bugs, he worms
everything in which is the breath of life. I
fight the ducks, burdocks, the mulleins,
the thistles, the grapes, the woods. the
roots-the whole vegetable kingdom. I
tight the heat, the frost, the rain, the hail
in short, l fight the universe, and get
whipped in every battle.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-06-12

Mr.. COOLEY's HAT.-When Mr.. Cooley
came into church last Sunday, he placed
| his new high hat just outside the pew in the
! aisle. Presently Mrs. Pitman entered and
as she proceeded up the aisle, her abound
| ing skirts scooped Cooley's hat and rolled
it up nearly to the pulpit. Cooley pursued
his hat with feelings of Indignation, and
when Mrs. Pitman took her seat, he walk
ed back brushing the hat with his sleeve.
A few moments later Mrs. Hopkins came
into church, and as Cooley had again
placed his hat in the aisle, Mrs. Hopkins
skirt struck it and swept it along about
twenty-five feet, and left it living on the
carpet in demoralized condition. Cooley
was singing hymn at the time, and he
didn't miss it. But moment later, when
he looked over the end of the pew to see
if it was safe, he was furious to perceive
that it was gone. He skirmished up the
aisle after it again, red in the face, and ut
tering sentences which were horribly out of
place in the sanctuary. However, he put
the hat down again and determined to
keep his eye on it, but just as he had turn
ed his head away for moment, Mrs. Smi-
ley came in, and Cooley looked around only
in time to watch the hat being gathered in
under Mrs. Smiley's skirts and carried
away by them. He started in pursuit, and
Just as he did so the hat must have rolled
against Mrs. Smiley's ankles, for she gave
a jump and screamed right out in church.
When her husband asked her what was
the matter, she said there must be dog
under her dress, and she gave her skirts a
twist Out rolled Cooley's hat, and Mr..
SMILEY, being very near sighted, thoughtit it
was dog, and Immediately kicked it so
savagely that it flew up into the gallery
and lodged upon the top of the organ.
Cooley, perfectly frantic with rage, forgot
where he was, and holding his clinched
fist under Smiley's nose, he shrieked -
'T've half mind to bust you over the
snoot ~ Then he flung down his hymn
book and rushed from the church. He |
went home bare-headed, and the sexon
brought his humiliating hat around after |
dinner. After this, Cooley intends to go |
to Quaker meeting, where he can say his |
prayers with his hat on his head.-Aaz |
Adcler.