The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1874-05-21
ALI Sorts of Paragraphs

The smallest women look hopefully 10
hymen.
- A tea made ofchestnut leaves, and drank
in the place of water, will cure the most obsti-
nate cases of dropsy in few days.
- The season of the year has arrived when
if you swear you won't catch any fish, but you
can buy big string for fifteen cents.
-"Alas " said the nurse who attended the
witty divine Sidney Smith, in his last illness,
'I have made a mistake and given you a bot
tie of ink" "Then," said the dying wit,
"fetch me all the blotting paper there is in the
house."
- It is by no means necessary that a woman
shall be beautiful to attract gentlemen There
are women whoes faces are almost plain enough
to ache, who have such agreeable manners,
sparkling wit and lovable dispositions, that they
are general favorites and bellies wherever they
are.
1t is proposed by the Lancaster (Pa.) Aorn-
ming Review to get up an editorial exclusion to
Europe, the party to sail from Philadelphia on
June 18th. The time expended in this tour
will be about four months, and nearly every
notable place will be visited. The cost to each
Individual will be about $500.
"A small boy got another boy, somewhat
smaller than himself, down on the ground, and
got hold of both his ears placing his knee in
the small of the boys back, and asked him, in
very persuasive manner, if he would give
him that big white marble of his'n. The boy
replied in the affirmative. How easy it is to
settle things when one goes about it the right
way.
- The race of mankind would perish did
they cease to aid each other. From the time
that the mother binds the child's head till the
moment that some kind assistant wipes the
death-damp from the brow of the dying, we
cannot exist without mutual help. All, there
fore, that need aid have right to ask it from
their fellow -mortals; no one who holds the
power of granting can refuse without guilt.
"A Washington letter says: "It seems now
to be understood that at the decoration cere.
monies at Arlington this year, more tolerant
policy will be adopted than upon former occa-
sion, and that the graves Of the Confederate
soldiers will be decorated 1t is understood,
too. that the tone of all the exercises on the
occasion will be broad and liberal toward the
opinions and motives of the soldiers Of the lost
cause"
The imitation party is forming. The
Evansville (Ind.) Courier thus furnishes the
head of the ticket "The Hon. George H. Pen
dleton, of Ohio, would be formidable can
didate for President on the ticket to be placed
in the field by the new movement. His
personal integrity, great abilities and the fact
that he was the author of the greenback policy,
would give him prestige that few other men
have earned"
A distinguished Judge in Georgia, as
much noted for his sharp sense as his keen
humor, says that the early entrance and active
campaigning of certain candidates into the
race for Governor, reminded him of q certain
story that Judge Cowart used to tell ofa fellow
who made bet about jumping the creek. He
went back quarter of a mile TO take q start.
By the time he reached the creek he was too
tired to even wade through.
The girls of a California seminary lately
developed singular tendency for using three
one cent stamps instead of the regular kind,
upon their envelopes The letters were so very
plain and matter -of-fact, and the attempts at
evading surveillance in the old-fashioned way
grew so scarce, that one inspecting te cher
Investigated this whim. And 10 ! the cunning
creatures had taken to writing tender eplstles
to their lovers under the stamps.
North Adams, Mass, has tailor known
well-known clergyman called at his shop with
pair of pantaoons, and asked him if they
could be repaired The knight of the shears
unrolled them, held them up in most artistic
manner, carefully examined them and replied:
YES yes the knees are the best part of them"
The reverend gentleman saw the joke, smiled
blandly and gracefully bowed himself out
y DR.. Brown -Sequard lately delivered lee:
ture in Washington in which ne enumerated
the theory that man has two brains perfectly
distinct from each other. The left brain he
holds is principally the organ of intelligence
and exterior relation, and the right of organic
functions and nutrition. He also maintains
that if we develope the movements of the two
sides of the body, the two arms and the two
legs, one just as much as the other, there is
chance that the two sides of the brain then
will be developed, as regards the mental facul