St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1874-11-20
Squibs.

Squibs.
y mau in Boston. III his hurry to as
>ist Il taimting lady, got IL bottle of mt
clla%r instead of camphor and bathed
her face with it. She was good deal
stuck up with his attention.
There * said to hc Il portrait ot
Thomas jefferson in il museum ut Mu-
nici. which is labelled ''Grorge Wash
jng'"n, the American patriot"
y French paper says that not one
American III il hundred has Il handsome
chin. This is due To the fact that so
many of them give nearly all their time
to the cultivation of cheek.
\ way. one evening. pulled down ii
turner's sign. and put it up over Il law
Yer> door IN the morning il read. "All
sorts OF turning and twisting done here
The elevation oi women. exclaimed
my Lord Tom N"ddN, as he WAS driving
home from Ascot. Aw. if il f,lla wants
Ia >cc-aw women elevated. he should
see 'em at the waceS NV after Il good
lumch.-T"Hch.
The -. Louis Globe SAYS: "Another
clergyman has got into hot water. the
Rev. Mr. Frank KcIlchcr. who. while
examining II Montana gcNser. broke
through the ragged edge of the crust.
and WAS scaldcd 50 that he even wished
he was dead.
He stated that the plaintiff WAS la
boring under "a severe confusion of the
lntr@umcnt> under the left orbit. with
great cNtr;tVaSltiOn of blood and ecchy-
mo>I> IN the surrounding cellular TISSUE.
which WAS III Il tumctied state there
waS also considerable. abrasion of the
cuticlc."
Judgr-'l"u mean. | suppose. that
the man had Il bad black eye p
"lc>."
Then why don't You say SO p
Samho wanted to buy some land,
but he had only half enough money.
"Well. said the land agent, 1.-THE price
l. 5000. but I'll take Sl.JO aud mort
gage for the balance in IL year" Samho
scratched his wool. But. say, boss.
>po>e Il t'.llcr haimt got no morgitch 2"
In vain the agent explained. when up
steps Bill and SAYS, Il can lucidate the
pint. y morgitch Is like this Yer. Spose
Nou pays de boss $50 down, and gives
Yer word and honor oh ii honest nigger
To pay him de udder S45U in year
den Spo>c on de very last day oh de
Year Yer pays him Sll9 and don't pay
/ him dc udder dollar, why den the NOR
glitch says de boss can jeS take all de
money and de land. and You don't have
muffin not "a cent" "Golly, boss, Il
morgitch makes IL migger mighty hon
/ est.
ONE OF PAR>ON BRowNLOw' Par
son Brow mloW tells Il good story of an
old Presbyterian bachelor preacher,
known almost rs woman-hater until
he WIS nearly fifty Years old. when he
married and settled where among
the mountains of North Carolina. The
paISon SAYS : Our bachelor FREUD was
preaching on the sinners excuses. Il
have bought Il piece OF ground, and
wish to 90 and sec it. said one. Here
i want of INCLINATION To attend to di-
vine things" said the preacher. An
other said. i have bought five yoke of
oxen. and must needs 90 and prove
them. This seems Il case of necessity &.
( \ thiId said. i have married Il wife,
and therefore | can not come Here is
Il ease of natural jmpossibiIity. from
which we may infer continued our
bachelor preacher. "that one Womdn
hdn ten STEERS" EditOr's D,arer, IL,
HUpe''S .NGgd:im" for December.
\ CANADIAN PHRA>E.-Ca Canada :
bright and sensible Governor General.
Lord Dutfcrin, has given .hc Dominion
people Il new hy-Wurd. which has
spread with electric rapidity from one
end of Canada to the other. On his
voyage out. h"img called upon by the
enigrant> to address them, he alluded
to this phrase. which had grated harsh
" on his ears: lie had the miSfort une
to have too many children" Lord d.
said Il remarked that perhaps no
better idca could he given of the differ
cmcc~ between the old country and theiI
new home than 10y the fact that where
+ a> in England Il struggling man might
hc ovcrWcightcd in the battle of life
10y IL numerous family. in the land t,
which they were going Il man could
scarcely have too many children. Here
| WAS applLudcd Justify, with ii cheer
iu! accompaniment of laughter also
when | was further greeted with an
approving thump on the back by {;
>tHlW;ut Young cmigrant, who erie,
ont. Right NOu are, Sill /; that's wha
I've been telling Emily" The Cana
dian> have got up the slang phrase
"Tbaf's whdt IRE been tcLIing Emily.
having had the ancclotc made familiar
bv going the round of the papers, ant
one hears every where, "1hdfs Wha
, Ere been telling Emily" EdjforS Dror
cr, in Harpr,'> Nngo-jnc for Decembe,'