The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1874-01-07
!. WHAT woULD roU LIKE TO hey.


They were comedy, interesting crowd of
Cousins male and female. There was Adolf
phus, Timothy and Augustus, and the like,
with sprinkling Of Arabellas, Marias and
Mary AIMS, all to match and, as finishing
touch, Bob, Tom, Dick and Harry. Nancy,
Sally, Polly and Sue, were not to bcforgotten
in a social gathering.
Asevery party has its mixed-up pleasures,
there would be now and then rumpus, and a
lull. When regular lull did take place,
said Roger Sprightly:
'sWhat would you like to be Jimmy?''
This question was put by the old gentleman
of the house, who was sitting in an easy
chair, his foot being placed upon stool, for
he was little equity.
"What should like to be ?" said Jimmy.
"What?.
"a soldier" he replied.
"Why should You like to be soldier"
said the old gentleman.
"Oh should like to march, and carry
sword, and a gun. Just lend me your crutch,
old fellow" said he seizing it instantly.
The point accidentally struck the old gentle
mans equity toe. This made him grin little
bit
"Shoulder arms y said the boy.
"Oh, my toe /! !" says the old man.
"Stand at ease. Wen fight it out ON this
line9" says the boy.
Here the old gentleman said:
81 wish could. Now, young fellow, you
would like to be a soldier eh?"
Yes" replied the youth.
"You can't get into any pits, pow-a-
days." said the old gentleman ''but you
can get bullet through your cocoanut, your
ears Topped of, and the like. How would you
like Mdt'o
Not much," answered the youth.
Then you will never make a soldier was
the reply
SO sad the gentleman with the equity toe.
"And what would you like to be, Master
Squibbs ?. he continued, addressing cat
eyed little individual, with a sandy complex
ion and white eyebrows.
| sIs it me you are talking to ?" said he
"Why, I'm to be a lawyer. You must know
that am very fond of catching flies and birds
with bird-lime and if the law trade come.
up to that, it will be bully for me. say, pap
DIV. you should see me catch old Browns ca
by the leg, going over the wall, the other day
1t was done in q moment with piece o
cord.'
"Now, you are wrong, Master Squibbs.-
You must not think of going into a legal prt
fession on that principle. You are very muc
mistaken to be a good lawyer you must
an honest man. Come, now, will tell W
:. a story will see what sort of a judge y
!. would make.
, "Oncc upon time some boys were pla
: ing and had thrown their clothes up
:, the ground when the game was over, Il
boys gathered up their garments, and
big boy put OH n little boys Goa
now, mind; this coat was too big for Il
little boy, but it exactly fitted the big DO,
i while the little boy took up the big boy
coat, which, being too small for the big DO
exactly fitted him (the little boy. Now, IL
little boy made a fuss, and would not ha,
the great boys coat. Surprising you had bee
| king, what would you have done in I'll
matter?"
, "Why, of course, - said the incipient law
yer, 81 should have granted that the big DO
should have kept the little boys coat that fl
, ted so well, and so with the little boy and til
. big boys coat. That's right, amt it ?" SAT-
he.
"No, sir" answered the old gentleman
.sthe true justice of the case is this, that boil
boys should have kept their respective coats
The big boy had no right to the little boy
coat, although his coat fitted the little boy
and the little boys coat exactly fitted him. y
Here the young lawyer stood mute, while
; all present saw the reason of the decision.
The hour of ten arrived, when the old gen
tleman soon found himself all alone in hi.
glory. Thus pleasant evening was spent by
the mingling of the old and young, and in q
social way they brought together arguments
While the one taught aoisdom, and the other
learned good-nature.