The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1874-07-16
The Exenrnion hv Comet.

Mark Twain claims to have leased
the comet for grand excursion to
the remotest stars, and thus sets forth
the attractions of the trip:
First-class fare. from the Earth 10
Uranus, including visits to the sun
and moon and all the principal planets
on the route, will be charged at the
low rate of 50 for every $4,000, 900
of actual travel. A great reduction
viii be made where parties wish to
make the round trip. This comet is
new and in thorough repair, and is
now on her first voyage. She is con-
fessedlV the fastest on the line. She
makes 100000 miles day with her
present facilities: but with a picked
American crew and good weather, we
are confident we can get 100000
out of her. Still, we shall meyer push
her to dangerous speed, and we shall
rigidly prohibit racing with other
comets. Passengers desiring to di-
verge at any point or return will be
transferred to other comets. We make
close connection at all principal points
with all reliable lines. Safety can be
depended upon. 1t is not to be de-
MED that the heavens are infested
with old ramshackIe comets that have
not been inspected aud overhanled in
10000 years, and which ought long
ago to have been destroyed or turned
into hail harges, bgt with these we
have no connection whatever. Steer
age passengers not allowed abaft the
main hatch.
Complimentary round-trip tickets
have been rendered General Butler,
Mr.. Shepherd, Mr.. Richardson and
other eminent gentlemen whose pub
lie services have entitled them to the
rest aud FelaE4ti0n Of q voyage of this
kind. Rarties desiring to make the
round trip will have extra accommo-
dation, The entire voyage will be
completed aud the passengers landed
in New York again on December l4th
1891. This is at least forty years
quicker than any other comet can do
it in. Nearly all the back pay men,
bers contemplate making the round
trip with US provided their eonstitu-
ents will allow them a holiday. Every
harmless amusement will be allowed
on board, hut no pools permitted on
the run of the ceInet-no gambling of
any kind. All fixed stars will be re-
spected by US, but such stars az saem
to need fixing we shall 1ix. If il
makes trouble we shall be sorry but
firm.
Mr.. Coggia having leased his comet
to us, she will no longer be called by
his name, but by my partners. N. B,
Passengers, by paying fgll fare, will
be cAtitied TO o shaEe in all the new
stars, s1us, moons, comets, meteors
and magazines of thunder and light
ming we shall discover. Patent medi-
cine people will take notice that we
carry bulletin boards aud a paint
brush aIong for use in the oenstella-
tions, and are open to terms. Gre
mati01ists are reminded that we are
going straight to-some hot place
ard are open to terms. To other par.
tics our enterprise Is Q pleasure excur-
sioEs kat Individually we mean busi-
ness. We 1shall fly our comet for all
it is wortL. For further particulars
or for freight or passage, apply on
board or to my partner, but not TO
me, since do not take charge of the
comet until she is under way. It ia
necessary, at q time like this, that my
mind should not be bprdened with
sInall business details.
MARK TWAIN.