davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

It i stated tr1, for the first time since lSGS
Gcu. Butler will lave to make Il contest tor HI:
unIuiuatOu
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

The dogs are sIayiug the steep throuEh'u
Southwest Virginia
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31
CAS.,a. ass.rI J: k.7st B..

Ar. vals-Bcsts Ben BIS. Il, Or b.. !"=.."
and Wrcnn, TO liam? h re AMI Bslt.tm2. Z.
Co; w ii Boyer, K C-oplcy ana J i. j"aa-
sou, TO- p Agncw; WIN smith } bn.a,. !
and Jno J Swift ~ Amer c:I Goa. Co..
Charles, to Maryinnd Coal Go.
DEPARTURES Bots rs Grant, >a:...
jas Green. w q Hunter, j " Nc nh, J 'T. :
Turn, Wren, w VI Smith, j J 5"ii. I'd !
lharies.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

RIM EKs.-Rccc p.s OF Wh"a. are i:lr, ""'
the market Tor choice lois i active at an nvanc"
of to &c on Saturd :y'$ I3o.ations; offerings %!
1923 bushels, with sales .: white al l.} III ~!
l25 for good to prime, and red t IoJ, 10 and
lis for common to fair Ia, III. IA, 10, ~,
III and l2o for good to stric.y prime. and l"'
for choice lot. Con is quit and st"s3y; "i'"r-
ings Of So bu.h"ls with sales of mix n ~ An
100 Oas are unchanged ollie ing of ~ o"."-
els wi b .ulcs Vt 80, u An.i 81
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31
Tho Hostile Indians.

New York, Aug. 30.-A special from
Wichita Agency says hgh!ing with the k'owas
and Nacooes, which began three wecNS ago,
was continued in de>u!iory manner until The
morning of the 25th. The Indians, 10 bands
ranging from, fifty to five hundred IN number,
made series Of dashes on Gen. Davidson 5
ou,posts and Sc; fire to the prairie grass to dc
stroy the buildings Of the agency, but all their
attempts we're defeated and the Indians huaIIy
fled westward, carrying off their killed and
wounded. The fire. which sometimes was as
high as the treetops, was suadnel after great
effort by the troops and the buildings saved.
Gen. Davidson has Induced The friendly Cad.
does, Wicbtas, Conauches. keches, lawaco-
mics and other tribes to return TO their reser-
vatious. Two additional companies arrived at
Wichita on the 18th, and vigorous and sleep
less policy against hostile luaiaus will be H.
ausuratcd The latter are supposed to have
fled toward Rainy Mountain Creek. The troops
lost only fur prIvatcs wounued. The h'o"a>
and Naconies had murdered several white meD
on the prairie, and the bodrs OF four bad heeD
brought 10 camp rddIed with arrows AID hor-
rbIy mutilated.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

\ BUSINESS LIKE WEDDING "A te" days
sirce as Rev. j. |. Nllr1, the president OF the
Stauntou Female Seminary, vas passing down
the street he was stopped by a good looking
young man dressed in his working clothes with
The mechanic blouse On, aud some Of The ln-
pc,neus Of his trade in bis hard. Has siure
was, Mr.. Miller, | would Ike 10 nave you
marry uc" "Wrll. said the minister, when
i it TO be done p Right now. said the
young fellow, aud producing the license he ac-
coupanied Mr.. VI. to the residence OF the lady
On entering they found neat 10 Hlus lady
sitting sewing, aud not surprised. ny the VISIT
Sac clImIy put aside her sewing, and rlSlog up,
the ceremony of making the vain Que was per
fjrmed The quiet wedding was IN strong c!-
trast to the ius>y affairs generally acconnany-
lug these matters .Stduntmt Ftnticotor.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31
DIED.

At FIVE a. m this morning, Mrs. BARBARA
GERTRUDE APPICH, Censor. o: the lat Got
lieb Appch, in the seventy. .ourtn year Of her
age gs- Funeral Tomorrow morning at ten
. clock, from the re.idcnce of her son in law,
w. Makeley, corner Wilkes and Henry streets.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

WILL Nor DECLINE Gov Allen attended,
BY invitation, the Onio Democratic State Con-
vcution, and being called on for speech, re
sponded 10 some stirring remarks. Among
ether things. he said that in the oden time
he had served his country for sxfeeo years in
a legislative capacity, and that h. left the pub
lie service with his hands as clean Of the public
money as wien he entercd it," Being sulutcd
by delegate as 'Dcxt President he replied,
Il VIII not decline any duty the people may
call upon NE to perform.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

COAPS! OAPS!-Honey, Glycer ne, Ros,
= Primrose, Elder Flower, Turtle Oil, chi
bo!ic, Brown Windsor, Sand, Assorted Bo9uet
Parisi.n Boquet, Ca-hmcre Boquet, " hite Veg
etable 6 yccrne. Sarge's Patent Glycor' ne,
Peach Blow, Imported CASTLE in cakes Thous-
and Flowers, Spring Violet, Palm Bayiey Sper-
maciti, Oakley's Glyccrne, BIGGER y Alberts
Toilet Soaps, Yankee, Clipper, Colgste's Barber,
Williams Barber, Continental and Military
shaving Soaps in store and for sale by
aug 81 HENRY COOK & co.
4 VERILL PAINTS, ready for immediate
"A application, requiring no OH before using.
W: have sJ!d .Grse quantities, and they nave
given general satisfaction. Sample cards can be
had upon application For sale by
aug 3, b. 5. LEADBEATER & BRO.
A XLE GREASE! AXLE GREASE We
~ hsve just received five gross superior Axle
q: AS" which we offer 10 the Trade ut very low
figure
sug3l HENRY COOK s. co.
nIL FOR MACHINERY-W have in store
~ fu stock of pure Winter Sperm. Lard,
EX RI Machine, Lubricstng and other Oils for
machinery, Of al kinds, for sale at lowest prices.
aug3l L. S. LEADBEATER j BRO.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-08-31

FATAL ACCIDENT The eastward bound
freight train on the Danville road ran uv' r aud
killed man By the name 0! Francis Mc(artu,
about half mile below BurkevllIc, on Thurs
day night last. 1t seems rom papers found on
his body that he was from Liverpool, and was
an apprentice to merchant. The body was
horribly mangled His inlrstines were torn
out and scattered along the track A tia box
vas found upon him containiur'a silver watch
and the papers showing that he was bound as
an apprentice He was about ulueteen years
ola
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
10 THE
-1U THE
NERVOUS 4 DEBILITATED
OF BOTH SEXES.
10 CHARGE FOB ADVICE AID con.
sULTArI0E.

DR j. b. DYOTT, graduate Of
Jefferson Medical College, Philadel-
phia, author of several valuable
works, can be consulted on all dis,
eases of the Sexual and Urinary or
gans, (Which he has made an es-
pecial study,) either in male or fe-
male, no matter from what cause
originating, or how long standing.
A practice of 80 years enables him
to treat diseases with success. Cures
guaranteed. Charges reasonable.
Those al a distance can forward let
tiers describing symptoms and en-
closing stamp to prepay postage.
B6-Send for the Guide to Health.
Price Toe. ao
j. B.. DYO177, n. ID.
Physicion and Surgeon, lO4 Duane
street, n. Y.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29

PUNDT, MEYER & RAAPKE, PIP FARM
HvM sT.,-wHOLEsALE DEALERS
MORGAN & GALLAGHER, 2O5 Farm
ham st.
WHITNEY, BAUsERMAN & Co., pa
Douglas st.
]. j. BROWN & BRO, Cor. 14th and
Douglas Streets.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
Oh TlCLES TO MARRIAGE.

HAePY RELIEF EoR YOUNG MEN
IL from the effects Of s.rors and abuses in
carry life Manhood restored gRdedements
70 marriage removed. New method Of treat
euyelopes. Aadren. Hovnrd xnodfntiea. No
3. south Ninth street. Phtlnh6Dhik Rk,-aa
- tit.tioa having . high ropuni1foa 1or konor
oooaoct snd peofeuko1ul tn ongo6-7w
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
SOAPS

SOAPS
Powell & Co., Soap manufacturers.
Sapo Publico, 6 1906 ga; Savon
Republic, do, Chemical Olive, 6 to
6 l-2; Palm, 5@51-4; German Mot
led, 6 1-4a6 l>2.
ART GOODS AND UPHOISTERER'S
STOCK.
Benjamin B. Jones, Decorative Up
h%olsterer and dealer in fine art goods,
27O Farnham Street, furnishes the
following quotations:
FRAME NoULDINGs.
Oil walnut mouldings, one inch,
per foot, SC; 2jnch 1Oc; 3 inch 15c;
polished walnut, l inch &c; 2 inch
15c; 8 inch 2lc. Berlin gilt, l inch
6@15c; 2 inch 1293Oc; 3 inch 1870
45c; imitation rosewood and gilt, l
iuch SOLO; 2 inch 10000; 3 inch
15@3Oc.
WINDOW SHADES.
Plain bands, 6 feet, all colors, per
pair, l so; ornamental bands, 2 OO@
4 90; each additional foot, Toe per
pair.
REPPs.
Union md all wool terry, per yard
l 50@3 10; Imperial, plain and stri-
ped, 2 5OaS 90.
DAMASKS.
Union per yard, l 80; all wool,
2 00a3 90.
MATTRESSES.
Husk, 4-4x6-2, 4 0Oa5 90; straw,
8 00a4 90; Excelsior, 8 5Oa4 so.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29

GENERAL COMMISSION.
}. Z. ROsENFELD gives us the
following quotations this day.
Butter, active, choice roll 15@1s;
Eggs, brisk, IL; Apples, 8 DOGS SO
per barrel; Live Chickens in de-
mand from 8 OO@2 25 per dozen;
Turkeys, 8 90 Oranges and Lemons
are advancing, Oranges s so per
box, Lemons 9 Copper box.
HARDWARE,
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
APPLETON'S
American
CYCliOPAEDIA
New Revised Edition.

Entirely rewritten by the ablest writer's OF
every subject. Printed from new type,
and illustrated with Several Thousand
Engravings and Maps
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29

2 Fast Express Trains Leave Daily,
Connecting as follows:
AT DES MONIES with the Des Moines Valley
Railroad, for Oskaloosa, Ottumwa, keokuk
AT GklNNELL with the Central Railroad Of
Iowa, for all points north to 81. Paul.
AT WEST LIBERTY with the Burlington,
Cedar Rapids 4 Minnesota Railroad, for
Burlington, Cedar Rapids, Dubuque 4 St
Paul, At WILTON JUNCTION with the
South-W estern nranch, for Muscztine.
Washington and all points south.
AT DAVENPORT with the Davenport 4 St
Paul Railroad for points north.
AZ kOCk ISLAND with the Western Union
Railroad for Freep,rt, Beloit, Racine, Mil
vaukee and all points In northern Illinois
AT ROCK ISLAND with the Rockford, Rock
Island and ST. Louis Railroad for ST. Louis
AT ROCK ISLAND with the Peoria 4 Rock
Island Railroad for Peoria and points east.
AT BUREAU JUNO, with br. och. Tor Hen
~, Lseere, Chillicothe and Peoria.
AT LA SALE with the Illinois Central Rail-
road for points mort. b and south.
At CHICAGO with al lines East, North and
south.
THROUGH TICKETS to all Eastern cities,
via this line, can be procured, and any infor-
nation obtained, CONCERNING points. at the
ticket othce of the COMPANY, lbs Farnhsm ST.,
Omaha, and also at the principal ticket Offices
along the line Of the U. p. K Il.
Baggage Checked Thronxh Ia all
Principal Eastern Points.
A. N. SMITH, II. RIDDLE,
Genl Pass'r Ag't, GenI Sup't
Chicago. Chicago.
Ticket Agent, Geul Western Ag't
a2Stf Omaha Omaha.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
Money and Commerce.
Daily Review.
OFFICE OMAHA DAILY BEE, I

OEElS6 SAAhA AAlLI DEE,
May %, 1874
A very satisfactory improvement
has been noticed in the dry goods
trade for the past few days. Boots
and shoes have received more atten-
ton to-day than on any previous
day of the week. Sales of lumber,
in car load lots, for the interior,
were.unusually heavy to-day. Butter
is coming in so rapidly as to giut
the market; the price went down to
Is cents to-day for some good lots,
a few choice lots only bringing Is
cents.
Staple groceries and provisions
sell steadily at quotations. The
market for green groceries OF all
kinds is dull, the supply exceeding
the demand.
OMAHA MARKETS.
Carefully Corrected iDaily
DRY GOODS.
]. ]. BROWN 4 BRO, Cor. 14th and
Douglas Streets.
PRINTS.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
BAKING POWDER.
Manufactured by the Imperial Bak-
Powder Co., Omaha, Neb.
CIGARS.
A. E. SIMPSON, Manufacturer, 532
18th Street.

CALHOUN MILLS FLOUR.
Wholesale depot 54S 18th Street.
Half barrel sacks .--~ 2 90
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
Chicago, Rock Island
and Pacific r. r.
THE GRAND CENTRAL ROUTE FROM
OMAHA TO CHICAGO
AND THE EAST,
Via Des Moines. Davenport and Rock Island.
2 Fast Express Trains Leave Daily,
AND THE EAST,

All Passenger Trains are equipped with the
WESTINGHOUSE PArENr AIR BRAKES and
Miller's Patent Safety Platform and Coupler.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29

Only Direct Route
T-WstsrloO, Fort Dodge, Dubuque,Ia
Crosse, Prairie Da CHEN. winOna,
st Paul, Duluth, Janesville, Memo.
sha, Green sas. Racine, stevens
Point. W-tertOvSn, Oshke N, fon
Du Lac, madison and Milwaukee.
II Being the Shortest and First Completed Line
Between
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
A and c

Constant improv-m nts have taken place in
the way of reducing Grade, and placing Iron
with Steel Rails, adding To IT'S rolling stock
new and Elegant
DAY and SLEEPING CARS
Equipped with the Westinghouse Air Brake
and MILLER Platform establishing comforta-
BILE and commodious Eating Houses, offering all
the comforts of travelling the age can produce.
From = to 10 Fast Express Trains run each
way daily over the various lines Of this road,
thus securing to the traveller selecting this
route sure and certain connections in any di-
rection he may wish to go.
Principal Connections.
AT MISSOURI VALLEY JUNCTION, for
Sioux CITY, fankton and points reached via
Sioux City aud Pacific railroad.
AT GRAND JUNCTION for Fort Dodge,
Des Moines, Ottawa and Keokuk.
AT MARSHALLfor st. Paul, Minneapolis,
Duluth, and northwestern points.
AT CEDAR RAPIDS for Waterloo. Cedar
Falls, Charles City, Burlington and st. Louis.
AT CLIN1ON for Dubuque, Dunieith, Prai-
RE du Chen, La Crosse, and all points on the
Chicsgo, Clinton and Dubuque, and Chicago,
Dubuque and Minnesota railroads.
AT FULTON for Freeport, Racine Milwau-
kee and all pointsi in Wisconsin.
AT CHICAGO with all railway lines leading
out OF Chicago.
Through tickets to all eastern cities via this
line can be procured, and any informal on OBJ
tanned, concerning Route, Rates, etc, at the
Company's Office, 2ls Farnhsm street, Omaha,
and also at the principal TicketOfices along the
line of the u. r. r. K.
50 Baggage checked through to all principal
W. H. STENNETT, MARVIN HUGHITr.s
Gen'l Passng'r Ag't. Gen. Sup't.
J. ii. LACEY, c. G. EDDY,
Ticket Ag't, Omaha. Gen'l Ag't Omaha.
mchlSy1
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
LUMBER.

LUMBER.
Subject to change of marFet without rotice.
WIN. NJ. FOSTER,
On u P. r. r. track bet. Farnham and Doug
GEO. A. HOAGLAND.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
YANKEE NOTIONS.

KURTz MoHR q CO., 231 Farnham
ST.
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29
Depot 104 Duane St., N. Y.

A physician in attendance to answer corres-
pondenoe and give advice gratis
Send stamp for pamphlets, free.
Crane & Brigham Wholesale Agents, San
Francisco. Cal.
ap2swtf
Omaha daily bee., 1874-05-29

Three yolums now ready. Succeeding vo-
lums, until completion, viii be Issued once In
two months.
sns Specimen pages Of the AMERICAN CfcLo,
PAKpIk, showing typs. illustrations. etc, VIII
be sent rats, on application
FIRST CLASS CANvASsISG AGENTS
WANTED
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09
COAL |

~OAL1 COALl
To arrive and on wharf full stock Of
Lyken's Valley Red Ash Coal.
Locberry Red Ash Coal
Shamokin Coal.
Henry Clay Mine CoSi.
Lee Mine White Ash Coal.
Delsno Mine White Ash Coal
Lehigh White Ash Coal.
Locust Mountain Coal.
Chesnut Red Ash Coal.
Chestnut White Ash Coal
West Virginia Coal.
Cumberland Coal.
All Of the best quality, and for sale at lowest
market rates-2240 lbs to the ton.
Orders left at 81 King street will be promptly
attended to. w. a. SMOOI,
iy loft Smoot's wharf, foot Of Princess ST..
HAVING disposed of my interest IN the
IL Wood and Coal Yard on King street 70
John Leathorland, shall continue the Wood
and Coal business at yards on the north and
south corners of Union and Queen sts., where
will always be on hand full supply Of the best
quality RED and WHITE ASH GOALS Of the
different sizes; CUMBERLAND COAL by the
cargo. car load or retail.
Also HICKORY, OAK and PINE WOOD.
The patronage of the citizens is respectfully So
licited All orders left At the Office of the Alex
andria Insurance Co., No. 81 KING street, with
Col Marye, or at Clarridge s. Grgg's Drug
Store corner King and Royal streets, will be
promptly attended TO. Weight guaranteed
IL 3-tf THOS. j. NJ EHAFF El.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09

I hereby tender grateful acknowledge nents to
my many customers for their liberal patronage,
and pledge myself to make every effort to carry
a stock of goods that will do credit to the State
of Virginia and servo to concentrate trade IN
our city that will be advantageous to both buy
er and seller.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09
L>XAMINE 1t.
pALMER'S PATENT JACQ UELlNE


PALMER'S PATENT JACQUELlNE
CORSET.
Dress makers recommend 1t as beng the best
Corset to lit dress over because Is cut IN such
y manner tnat the front and back seams lit Ike
seams to n dress. 1t is superior To any other
G.rset now in use because iss peculiar style "t
cutting gives sufficient fullness at the bosom,
without folding at the top; graiuaily and close
Is fitting to- end over the hpsi Is longer ironI
and back tnhn ordinary corsets and IN tact Is
the only corset cut III this form For ssle Dy
dec "A II. r WI / Nj ~ ~
YI1O WAGON MAkEKS-We have on hand
Il n superior lot OF GU NJ, ELM and oAh
HUBS .hicn were made u our order sens"l-
ed tinlb Der These Hubs have been 'alnincu oy
competent Il isc- aid pronounccd u De cheaper
Nj d !ntt,r tn III my heretofore or'ugh, 10 ms
market We nvl-e Al tx tinimatIrh Jus och
-; Kim. and ) rE.s are oi ..rrn i:iahul "'
tur, ana arc lar more uut,Dir snd 5tt1 :: III '''
t!aI We,ler.l goods. AAc> SprihSs' 'iia '.''
l.rva$. and ot,r goods IN tn7 .s'1e IN: AZ "aJ
in ,c,r,. sui ri :e. ilOde. .ate Cflt al Sc
navlt j. 7. CRn,1l. 20 ' & -
noe : -, C:tDr ~ O..- --.-'so
y N i.A Ag r. us. :e,ev,u b
o. ~ VI RiM AI,
dee u Corner tA,ng and ). -A7aph s.7.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09

MOURNING DEPARTMENT-This stock
Nl receives our most careful attention, and III
it wi, be fouGd not only ali of the best and most M
servicesble grades OF oTANDA ~ uOODo,
bat every novelty for deep o. light mourning
that comes out in the Lonlon market - Our y II
Monumental" brand of ALP CAS- and U kh
MOHAIRS are imported only by Us, and while
tnsy arc es slightly and wei! finished Us ANY other
make OF goods, they are fully oae-third heavier
than any other brand in the market.
Particular attention paid to tllirg funeral or.
ders. HAMILTON EASIEh " ooNo.
gs5~5ampies supplied by mail on application.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09

y REMARKABLE WINTER.-The summer
like weather OF Sunday, which extended over
nearly all the Atlantic States, was most ab
normal freak, and has been speedily followed
by reaction The popularity of this warm
streak of weather appears, from an examlnatlor
of the Signal Office reports to be due to re
markable phenomenon. On the ID inst. th'
equatorial winds in the Gulf of Mexico and tht
Southern States became established, and tht
vast stream of the equatorial current projected
in touguc-like shape, from the Gulfto the Ohio
Valley. On Sunday it pushed its way to Lake
Outarlo with thermometers ranging seventy
three at Pitsburg and sixty-seven at Roches
scr-atout the same temperature which the
soft austral winds now bring to the Invalid IL
Florida or to the consumplive retreats on the
shores of the Mediterranean. The prevalence
Of these long continued reflections of the equa,
torlal air current northward has been, SO tar,
the characteristic of the winter. The mean tenn
pcrature Of Key West for the month of Jauua,
ry is lower than that which prevailed this side
OF the Mississippi River on Sunday.
The effect of this broad southerly air stream
is observed in the great humidity and frequent
deGsc foss which follow Its remote cause
would seem to be traceabe to an extraordinary
radiation of solar heat duriug the present mid
summer of the Southern Hemisphere, the ex-
Cess Of heated air being forced across the Equa-
tor iuto our hemisphere These warm spells
have already very materially shortened and mi.
tlsated the winter, which the poor so much
dreaded, and if they should continue at inter
vAls till February this will be one Of the midest
winters in American climatology. These non
periodic or abnormal changes, in the opinion OF
able meteuruloglsts, come from causes exterior
to The Continent, and it is said that they seldom
have compensative changes during the Same
Year and in the same hemisphere 1t does not
therefore, follow that the extreme mildness Of
the carly part of the winter will be followed BY
extreme severity, but, if we may judge from ex'
rerenee, rather the contrary. y Herald.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09
SPRING GOODS

the advance orders for wnlch will beg to ar
rive early in February.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1874-01-09
VOL. LXXV.
SCRAPS.

SCRAPS.
The question was put to candidate fol
installation by an excellent brother ''CoulC
not God have changed Pharaoh heart p The
answer was shrcwd but 2vasive. II insist up
on an uneGuivoca' answer, cried the question
er. Gould not God have changed Pharaoh s
heart ?" After thinking a moment the answer
came IF he had neglected everything else
and given his whole attention to 1t, l don
krow but he might.
Mr.. James Russell Lowell, in his 1.-The
Courtiu," has drawn by Anticipation an exact
portrait of the average back-pay Congressman
OF the day;
''He stood spell on one foot fust,
Theu stood spell on tother
Au' on which one he felt the wust
He couldn't ha told yc nut her
The shortest and most emphatic editorial
valetictory on record was made by Frank NJ.
Myers California editor, who parted from
his readers 10 these atfectionate words; HAY
ing sold out my connection with the Forest
Grove Independent ceases with this issue, and
| am id glad of It,
4 lispiug mother, who had presented her To-
taut at the baptismal font for christening, 90
being asked by the clergyman, "W hat name?'
responded in whisper, Lucy, sir, when, to
the horror Of the whole congregation and the
consideration of the mother he christened the
baby "Luciter.
The congregationaist says: The lady
whom We have mentioned as inQulrlng If the
pcsiding officer of the Alliance was Cardinal
Nooslcy, is more than matched by the New
Iu,k theological student who asked IT the
Parker who spoke at one of the meetings was
Theodore Parker.
so you don't care about donkeyridug,
MSS. And why ? '.Oh, I've got a pony, aud
one doesn't care about donkeys after that, you
huow Has a pony got more legs than
donkey, then - Mis>y-"Ics; exactly twice
as many as some dookeyS that know Of -
Yes take her aud welcotue,' responded an
lIiiuoS tarlucr, when young man asked tor
his daughter She run away with school
master clipped with Snowman, shot Wild CAT,
and whipped her mother, aud The soouer you
lake her the better.
\ young man out in search OF bis fathers lost
pig near Scranton. Pa, accosted an lrl>hman
;.olr tie road with, Have you seen stray
,lg about here ?" Faith and how could tell
Il stray pig from another!'
\ gentleman who rather suspected some oue
was peeping through the key hole Of his office
door investigated with syringe full of pepper
sancc aud went home to fud his wife had been
cutting wood and chip had bit her in the eye.
Mr.. Jones carries his money in bis hat, and
the other day, when he saw the entire supply
going off on the wiuds of heaven, bitterly re-
marked, that's what you got for your internal
Initiation.
Mark Twain, in speaking ofcanibalism, grows
serious for once, and soemDly declares that,
for bis own part, 'he would 60 hungry for
two days rather than eat an old personal
friend"
4 Denver minister was marrying couple,
when dog fight interrupted, and the bride
called out drive ahead ; the yaller pup has got
him by the pawl'
\ white boy met a colored boy and asked
him what he had such short nose for. II
spec, 50 it wont poke itself into other people $
business