The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-12-25
How Zach Chandler Get Even with
Roscoe Conkling.

Z ELIGuRbus
sion he raised his arm over the table.
"See.my muscle" said he "I can
lick any man of my size a1ywhere, if l
am an old man; that is because l am
scienced in the business. But / won't
lick a man unless he is gentleman.
Now, when a man tells id lise about
me, my way is to go and lick MIN, II he
is a gentleman. Now look at Don Pott
CPiatt); hetells more id lies aboot me,
! and I would lick him, but Don Pott Is
no gentleman. George Townsend Twas
going to lick once for telling Id lie
about me and hunted for him over
week, but before found him learned
he was no gentleman, and so his hide
was saved.
Chandler's great hobby is his skill as
a pugilist. Roscoe Conkling is also
great boxer. He has s. private gymna
SUM in his residence ct Washington,
where after dinner, he invites such of
his friends as aregymnastically inclined,
for friendly little bout with the gloves.
Conkling is very good amateur boxer,
and as he is a very large, powerful man,
he generally has it his own way with
the guests who are bold enough to put
the gloves on with him. For some time
it was an open dispute between Chan
dler and Conkling, which was the better
boxer Of the two. Chandler would,
after every dinner party of which he
was member, calmly assert that he
could lick any man of his weight in the
United States. One day last winter
Chandler dined with Conkling, and the
latter inveigled the great war senator
into the private gymnasium. The gloves
we're douned, and the two doughty
champions began to make graceful SEN
atorial passes toward one another ac-
cording to the most approved rules Ct
the P. r. The bout, however, was OF
very short duration. Chandler sud
denly received blow between the eyes,
which caused the huge senatorial form
to go over backward; his trusty legs
failed him, and then he sat down so
hard that tears came out of his eyes.
It took four men to get the war senator
upon his legs, but he threw up the
sponge at once, without any further
effort to punish Conkling. The only
remark he was heard to make was,
"Damn strange" and GIL fix him
yet"
Conkling and Chandler were much
together in a social way, and it was
not long after the above occurrence
when Chandler received another invita-
tion to come up to his house end spread
his legs under Conkiings social board.
Chandler sent back word that he re-
GREETED very much his inability to be
present, but he had guest at his house
a valued constituent from Michigan, and
he could not leave him. Conkling sent
back word, Bring your friend along"
With this form of invitation Chandler
consented to come up. He brought his
friend with him, and introduced him as
Mr.. Howard, of Detroit, Michigan.
Howard was a sad eyed man of diff
dent manners, who contented himself
with paying a very close attention to
the themes of the bill of fare rather
than to Join in the general conversation
of the dinner table. Conkling was in
great glee during the dinner. He
told over and over again the story of
Chandler's discontinue as a boxer, and
never seemed tire of asking him
what he thought of his ability TO lick
any man in the United States. Chan
dIer took all the remarks in an absent
minded way, as if, suddenly, he had be-
come lifted above any such petty ambi-
ton of considering himself a fine ath-
lete. After dinner Conkling led his
guests into the gymnasium for gen
eral smoke and chat.
Come" said he pleasaI tly, to Chan
dler, don't you want another bout
with the gloves?" and then Conklirg
Laughed again in his most cheerful,
turkey-gobDier style, as he put on
pair of loves.
"No, L don't want to box" said
Chandler; "but perhaps my friend
here would consent to amuse you.
Turning to MIR. Howard, Chandler re-
marked, " You box, do you not?"
Mr.. Howard still looked sad-eyed
and absent-minded. He did once know
something about it, but it was such
long time ago.
"Come, come" said Conkling, "let
us have a friendly bout. I won't hurt
you."
Evidently the great New York sena-
tor was pinnirg g to knock some one
down. The sad-eyed Mr.. Howard, evi
IDENTIFY fattered at the prospect of being
knocked down by so distinguished a
man, began slowly to put on a pair Of
gloves. AS he was drawing on the
gloves Chandler was observed to walk
down little to the background. A
conteuted look was on his face, and
every now and then he would raise his
huge right foot no under bis swaying
voluminous coat tail and give himself a
congratulatOry kick, expressive of rap
tUre.
The sad-eyed man now came forward,
and the round began. C0nkling was
for proceeding at once to knock his Cp-
ponent down, and he wOuld have done |
so had he not found great difficulty in
getting anywhere near the sai-eyed !
man. The affair eliminated by the |
sad. eyed mans suddenly rushing for
ward and landing O tbunderbOlt Of a |
fist between Conkling's eyes. The SEN
ator went over ike q big tree, and |
rolled into the corner of the room, |
where he lay for a moment stunned by |
the conclusion. He was heard to say |
afterward that he thought house had !
fallen on him.
Conkling had enough of boxing for
once. Chandler made several pleasant
little remarks about the skill of his
friend Conkling, which we're not re-
ceived in the most cheerful way. Judge
Of Conkling's feelings the next Gay
when he learned that Chandler Aad
played Joke upon him by giving Mr..
Howard 800 to come up and bounce
Mr.. Conkling. The Mr.. Howard of
Dettoit, Michigan, was none other than
Jem Mace.
Correlation of Bees and Flowers.
The bees, Mr.. Darwin says, have
solved difficult problem. They have
made their cells of a proper shape to
hold the greatest possible amount of
honey with the least possible consump-
on of precious wax in their construc-
ton. No human workman is skillful
enough to do what crowd of bees can
do, working in dark hve-make cells
Of wax of the true form. The number
IF humble bees in the country will de-
pend upon the number Of cats. How
can that be? Because the number of
bees is dependant upon the number of
field mice, which eat the bees. Hence
the more cats, the fewer mice, the more
bees. If the whole genius of humble
bees became extinct, or very rare, the
hearts ease and red clover would be-
come rare or would disappear. How is
that? ? Because bees promote the growth
1f those flowers. The visits of bees are