Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1874-08-14
anmoruus shrtfbes,

glad you've come. l was reading IN the
Bible the other day about Moses marrying
niger, and wish you would explain the
matter
4 don't read Chat way in the Bible, re-
Piled 1t reads that Noses married an
Ethiopian woman
We'll, doesn't that mean a Niger p
4 viii tell you how it was answered.
There was a terrible war waged by the
Ethiopians against the Egyptians, and two
great armies sent from Egypt against them
had been destroyed The Ethiopians were
governed by magnificent queen, some
tEing like Semiramis, who led out her own
armies, and who knew how to gain a vic
tory. But when Moses was sent with a
third Egyptian army against her, he asked
the help of God, and managed so wisely that
the queen agreed to surrender her forces to
him, and become tributary TO Egypt, pro-
vided he would marry her.
Wei, said the old lady, 4 'cas sure 1t
,casaf aay common niger
THERE is current good story Of a
Scotch milk boy which may be Of interest
in these days OF complaint about the adul-
teratiou Of milk. A boy delivering milk
was stopped the otherday by two detective
officers, who asked him if anything was put
into it.
'Ou, ay,' was the answer.
Thereupon the officers thinking they had
clear case, offered him penny if he
would tell them what.
'Ah,' said he, with grin, ye wadna
gie's the penny though tell't ye.'
%, yes, we will, said the officers.
'Gies't then returned the lad ; and the
penny was handed over with the question
Now, what do you put in the milk =
co. said the boy, with 1t cunning look,
i pit the measure in every time 1 taxi
ony DOT!
That youth has a bright future before
him.
How SHE DID IT.-In the police court
in the city Of Chicago, few weeks since,
a wife thus ingeniOusly explained away
poor husband One day when she was
running across the room with fork in her
hand be jumped in the way and struck his
wrist against the fork, wrenching it from
her grip by tie prongs, which he ran into
his wrist. Then he endeavOred 10 strike
her, but she held up pan of hot dishwater
between them, and he spilled it ali over his
head. Then he got still more angry at this
accident, and started to jump at her, but
his head came against her hand, and be
fell down. She took h4d Of his hair TO
raise him up, and the hair was laoistened
by the hot water, SO that it came of. Then
she saw it was no use to reason with him
any longer, so she left the house
THE WHOLE LoAF.-A gentleman re-
lates: Some years since l boarded at a
hotel, the proprietor of which was a newly
married man. The maiden name of his
spouse was Crufnb. Immediately after
marriage, and when the hotel business
commenced, old lady Crumb, he daughter
Peggy, and her two sons, John Ike, re-
gularly dOmiciled themselves within the
hospitable walls of the inn. The landlord
was a good natured, easy-gOing sort of fel-
low, not quite as smart as some folks but
one day he got off the following. Address
ing me, he said, Look hayr, Sam, I'll tell
You just how it is when ] got married l
thought was getting a Crumb. but In
10 Z Ill ] Il. Ill
loaf
AT a recent prayer-meeting of colored
people at Erie, the decency and good order
of the meeting being destroyed by negro,
named Brown. whose prayers in public
were only ircoherent rawlings, the pastor
inquired What fool nigga's dat praying
down dar nea' de do'?' 4 dozen people
replied with one voice: 1T am Brudder
Brown, sah.' 'Den,' replied the pastor,
'Bruddor Brown subside, and let some
one pray dat's better quinted wild de
Lord
AN ODD TASTE.-'And have you had
no other son 2 asked curious lady of a
bronzed old sea captain. oh, yes, madam.
| had one that lived in the South Sea Is
lands for nearly a dozen years Really !
Was be bred there, and what was his taste
the sea or the land 2 No, madam, he
wasn't bread, he was meat-leastways the
natives ate him: and as for his taste-the
chief said he tasted Of ter6acker.'
SOME one says if we would show our
selves really good TO our daughters we
must be generous to them in a truer
sense than that Of hanging trinkets on
their necks.' No words could be more
sensible. Nine girls out of ten would
rather have camel's hair shawl than
necklace. Parents should remember this.
a MARRIED man, hearing that the eat
ing Of certain kinds Of animal food would
aid the same tissues of the human 5ody-as
for instance, calves brains would nourish
the eaters brains, or beef5 liver the eaters
liver Immediately gave strict orders at his
family market that no more tongue of any
kind be sold 10 his wife or mother ir.law
\ NEAR-sIGHTED and inquis.ive stanger
kicked an ornamental dog on a street stoop
to see if il was solid or hollow. l. was not
solely an ornamental dog, however, but
one that was there on business, and the
near-sighted and inquisitive stranger is
now quarlntined at his hotel for a few
day.
DARWIN acknowledged himself sold
when his little niece asked him, seriously,
what cat has that no other animal has
He gave it up, after mature deliberation,
and the sly little puss answered 'Littens.'
WHEN a Harrisburg woman chases her
boy with broom, he runs down to the
river and jumps into the water. When he
comes out his face is washed his mother
does not know him, and he is safe.
JOSU KILLINGS saws YIN Eant find com