The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1874-01-08
CURT CORRESPONDENCE .

Dorset l have Just oeen married, ana
am the happiest dog alive. -
Berkeley" His interesting news
being acknowledged with: "Dear
Berkeley Every dog has hs day.
Dorset" Mr. Kendall, some time
Uncle SANS Postmaster General,
wanting some information as to the
7ource Of river. sent the following
no'e to village Postmaster: "Sir.
This department desirous TO know
how far the Tombigbee River runs
up2-Respsctfuljy yours, ETC." By
Ieturn uail came; ''Sir: The
Tembigbee does not run up at all; it
runs down. Very respe ctfully
yours etc. Kend Il not appreciat-
ing his subordinate's humor. wrote
again: "Sir; Your appointment
IS Postmaster is revoked; you will
turn over the funds, etc., pertaining
TO your successor" Not at sill
disturbed by his summary dismissal,
the Postmaster replied: n he
venues for tits office for the quarter
7nding Sept. 80 have been 50 cent?;
its expenditure, same period, for
allow, candles, and Irvine, $I.O5. l.
t1ust my successor is insaencted to
adjust the balance" His superior
ofic was probably as much disgust
ed with lis precise correspondent as
the merican editor who, writing 10
a Connecticut bro ner: ''Send tul
particulars of The hsod''
an inuI datlon at that place-receiv-
ed for reply: "You will find them
in Genesis. A good specimen eff
Yankee brevity Is the ord received
by a commiSsar' at : officer named
Brown from Col. boyd, which
could scarcely have boen couched In
fewer words han: ''Brown-heet-
Boyd" tn, Colonel receiving his
supplies with note running: boyd
--bsef-Brown."
Talleyrand acknowledged a
pathe ic letter from lady friend an
nouncing her widowhood, with
note of Two words: .,IleIas!
Madame" And when the easily
conso!ed daue wrote not very long
afterwards soliciting his influence Oh
behalf OF an officer she was al out to
marry, he merely replied: ''ie! ho.
Madame!" More satisfactory to the
ecipIcEt was Lord kIdon's note to
his friends. DIR Fisher, of the Char
erhouke: Dear Fisher: | cannot
to-day, give you the preferment Tor
which pou ask. Your SIN
cere friend. -Eidon. (7uru ouey)
i gave you y's erday." Pleas
antly 10 all parties concerned was he
corre-p ondence between The
Archbishop of York and the Bishop
Ri Cork: "Dear Co k: Please ordaln
Stanhope. York "Dear York:
Stanhope is ordained. Cork
w hen member of Lord n orih'
Administration, Fox one night took
the Liberty Of walking into one lobby
while his chief went into the other.
AS he sat on the @~ministeriaIss beach
the next evening one.of the door
keepers handed hin note.
Upon opening it, The
rebeIlious pei ician read; Sir: His
Majesty has thought proper to order
law Commission OF the Treasury,
ia which do not ind the name of
Charles James Eos. - North" Not
nore ag eeabie to the recipient was
Henry Drummond's answer 10 a leltcr
asking him 10 join the advocates of
the Maine Liquor law. "Sir: think
the Maine Liquor lay peltectIyde' es-
table, and will do my best o pre,eut
lis icing adopted here. ours. II.
Drumnond. AS a arule, a man with
a grievance is too proud Of his
wrongs to le laconic, bat here is an
exception 0 the ule. Sir: VAS a
Lieutenant with Gen. Stanhope
when he took Minorca in 1908, tor
which he was made Lord. | was q
Lieutenant with Gen. BIakeney whcn
he lost Mihorca ia 1857, for which
he was made a Lord am Lieut..
en- and stilI." Surely such an opeaI
Ough to have proved resistless, al,
mo resistless almost as rsistless as
tha Of ,he dying dramalist. Dear
Bob: | have not a1,,z1hlnm To L..