Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1874-11-28
A PERFECT CURE.
L. C. PRlNDLE.

"Its no use talkin'-there Between
'em both they're plag'in my life out o
me. A perfect Silly and Chary- bodice
and I'm kept bobbin', in sperit from
one 10 tother all the, time. Why don't
you say somethin', David ?" And Aunt
Hepscy squared herself around, hands
on her hips, and glared fierceIy at him.
Uncle DaYid said nothing. Perhaps he
did not understand exactly who or what
"Silly Chary bodice" might be, and
wisely concluded to steer clear of shoals.
The irate old lady continued
"There's John Drummer, too, settin'
there all day by the fire, doin' nothin'
but pore over little might OF doctor
in book-'home pathee' he calls it-and
takes specks of pills not bigger'n a
pin head just as if they could do any
body any good p' and the old lady glarcd
up into the air as if there was man up
there and she expected him TO cOntrovert
this coyet condemnation, and was prepar-
ed to knock him out of time immediate
ly if he did. Finding that no answer
made its appearance, however, she look
ed down upon the placid Uncle David
and continued:
You incident tell me, David s'posen
he IS your old friends son, an is rich.
an pays well for his board, that amt no
reason why he should sit down and
make up his mind he's got a cancer on
his liver, an goom-bile in his stomach,
and l don't know what ailin' him bes-
idcs. Tain't nothin' the matter @ith
him but imagination, believe, and it he
y as told of it 'tw ould do him more good
than all his home-pathee, l know. He's
just as well as l am. Dyspepsia umph {;
what business has a strong young teller
like him got 10 have narVeS, anyway?
An then he won't take anything to do
any good. fixed him up a nice mess of
bOneset tea, an he won't take it, but he
swallowed an extra dose of little pills
insted." And being now pretty well out
O. breath, Aunt Hepsey rested her case
and fixed her eyes upon the clouds, as
though giving her opponent IN the air
one more chance 10 come 10 time. Uncle
David, taking advantage of the pause, put
in his head and said:
Now, Hepsey, don't bes hard on the
young man. l guess he's sick, and We
ought to have some charity"-(Dear old
Uncle David Just as if he did not
have charity for everybody)--"than
we do. You know he amt got no moth
er, nor father, nor any friend, anyway
leastwise," the old gentleman added,
thoughtfully as he rubbed the end of his
nose---a trick he had--"leastwise not
that will do him any good; plenty OF
them wild fellows he knows-too many
of 'cm for his own good"
"What is this man talkin' about ?" in
terruDted Aunt Hepsey, apparently much
incensed at her failure TO extract reply
from the clouds: It's more'n two years
since he's been with any Of them wild
oat chaps, an it's my opinion that if he
had kept away from them in the first
place he'd been tough now, instead of
having to take SO many of them little pills
to brace him up. Umph the idee of
them things bracin' anybody up r'
By the glances she cast heavenward it
was evident the good lady was firmly
persuaded this would fetch the answer
she expected if anything would, and, fig
uratively speaking, she prepared to leave
if not a leg 10 stand on. Uncle Da-
vid rubbed his noes slowly and said moth
ing.
aThere's Kate, too When we took her
in an adopted her, an made as much of
her as if she was our own dead baby
come 10 life"-a tear here glistened in the
oil lady's eye-"we expected she wouldn't
make us no trouble nor nothin.' Now
look at her, l say, coming home from
chnrch only last night and that Tom
Jones with her he wearin' moIstache,
too, and his father deacon in the
church" This last seemed particularly
dreadful tn Aunt Hcpsey. Uncle David
camly smoked his pipe, and rubbed his
nose, and somehow didn't seem at all hor-
riied.
"There, there, Hepsey DON'T"
"Thars just like you, Uncle David
Cummins; you wouldn't fret if the earth
should cave in. Next you know that gal
will be getting married gals are so
foolish nowadays they don't know what
they want nor what's good for them
neither"
"'Bout the same as they used to be,
Hepsey jist about the same, for what l
see. Better let 'em alone, an itII an
come out straight, l guess ana Ohcle
David went off TO the barn TO see 20
things while Aunt Hepsey went INTO the
house, first looking carefully around 10
see If that answer was in sight any
where . o,.
of mind rs Uncle David about both |
Tohn and Kate. The former worried her |
lei endless new diseases he was just GO
inr " tsi to nave, and endless new medicines
hc I"s was just taking to cure them home-
nathic medicines too, which she couldn't |
see any sense or use in, The latter troub-
led her far more in the fear of her get
ting married, and especially to that Tom
Jones with moustache.' Aunt Hep |
sey wanted her TO stay with them al
ways, or at any rate until some one
came along good enough Tor her ; and as
no man was ever made who could come up |
to her rigid standard, that and staying |
always meant the same thing. Kate was
very pretty, and, of course, lad many ad.