The Red Cloud chief., 1874-03-26
SCARED OUT OF A WIFE.
A bic Story.

WAA4SA l. ohA WI W
write, was told to me one bleak, cold
night, in a country parlor. 1t was one
OF those nights in midwinter, when the
wind swept over the land, making every
thing tingle with its frosty breath, that
i wa seated before a blazing fire, sur
rounded by a jolly, half dozen boys
and an old bachelor-a Peter Green
about forty and eight years old.
It was just the night without, to
make those within enjoy a good story,
so each of us had to tell his ~favorite
story, " Mr.. Green, and as he was
jolly old fellow, we all looked for a
jolly story. We were somewhat sur
prised to hear him say, II have no
story that would interest you," 30 we
had to find other entertainments for a
time, when one of the boys told me to
ask him how it happened he never got
married. So i did.
We'll, gentlemen" he began, cit
don't seem right for me to tell how that
happened, but rs it is about myself /
don't care much. You see, when l was
young, We had to walk rs high as five
miles to church and singing school,
which was our chief enjoyment. But
this don't have anything to do with my
not getting a wife, but l just wanted to
show you that We had some trouble them
days in getting our sport.
John Smith and l we're like brothers,
or like "Mary and her little lamb"
Where n went the other was sure to
60. So we went TO see two sisters and
as we were not the best boys imagine
bic, the old gentleman took umbrsge
and wouldn't allow us to come zeal the
house, so We would take the girls to the
end of the lane, and there we would
have to take The final kiss.
We soon got tired Of that sort of fun,
and / told John, on our way to singing
school n night, that / was going TO
take Saddle home, and that / was going
int the house, too.
He said the old man would run me if
I did.
1 told him l was going to risk il any
how, let come what would.
He said che would risk il If l
would"
SO home We went with the girls.
When We got TO the end of the lane. l
told the girls We proposed going ali
the way.
They looked at each other in a wsy
1 didn't like too well, but they said the
old folks wouldb be in bed. so they didn't
care If w did.
They were a little more surprised
yet when i told them we thought of
going in q little while, but as all was
quiet when w got to the house, we had
no trouble in getting iuto the kitchen.
Then and there We had our first court,
and l made up my mind to ask Sadie r.
be my wife the next time 1 came.
II was now past the turn of the night.
and as we had our miles to walk. /
told John VI would have to be going.
So we stepped out on the porch. but
just rs We did so, the sky was lit up by
lightning, and one tremendous thunder
peal rolled along the mountain sides.
It's echo had not died out in the far off
wales until the rain began to to pour
from thegarnered fullness of the clouds.
We waited for it to stop until we were
all sleepy, when the girls said weshould
go to bed in the little room at the head
of the stairs which ledout of the kitchen.
as their father didn't get mp esaly we
coald be home before the old folks were
ast,r. So after bidding the girls q sweet
good highland hugging them q little
and wishing them pleasant dreams,
and promising them to come back on
next Saturday night, We stated for
bed. re-
We didn't have far to 60, as the bed
stood lear the head OF the stairs. John
wal soon in bed. but as I Was ALWAYS
little slow, and full of curiosity. i was
looking around the little room.
At last / thought l would sit down on
q chest which was spread over with .
nice, white cloth. while L drew of INV
boots So.dovn + sat. when, stars Of
the east, l went plump into a big egg
custard pie!
thought John would die laughing.
for he said l had smashed that custard
ell to thpndsr. and the plats right in
two. &
You g We had to be awful Quiet. so
that the old maa would not heal.
Vas now ready to get into bed. 40 4
put the light out and picked mn INV
boots, thinking to pnt item in . more
convenient place, WHEN down INV ore
leg vent through pipe hole. which lad
been c,vered with paper, up to INV hin.
Now one part Ut me was MP stairs.