davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04
Kansas Pacific Railw

The man line extends from Kansas City, No,
and Lcaycnworth, Kansas, both tOurishing cities
on the Missouri River, through Central Kansas
and Eastern Colorado G39 miles to Denver, Colo
RADIO, and with several hundred miles Of Branch
cs, in addition, reaches every portion of Kansas,
Colorado and New Mexico, and all of its fertile
valleys. Rare opportunities are offered for ac-
curing homes IN section of country unsur-
passed for fertility and health. The State Capt.
tai, State University, State Agricultural College,
State Normal School, Blind Asylum &C. of Kan
sas, are all located Immediately along the line,
ahd the educational facilities generally are un-
cqualcd. BY refererce to the United States A."
ricultura, Reports, it viii be observed that Kan
sas had greater yield to the acre Of the cereals
than any other State, and Gold Medals and Di-
plomas lOr the greatest and best display OF Fruit
and Agricultural, horticultural and Mineral pro-
ducts, have beer awarded at the Great EXPOSE
mons and Fairs throughout the land in compcti.
ston with the other States. For the tourist and
Invalid, a varied and charming landscape is pre-
scented; and the delightful air Of Colorado, and
the now Justly celebrated Cold Warm and Hot
Springs in the vicinity Of Denver have given re-
newcd life 10 the weary ane have restored health
to the sick. Don't fail 10 take trip over the
Kansas Pacific Raiiwav,and If you want n good
home, bc sure 10 settle along its line. You can
obtain Maps, Circulars, &c., giving all informa-
lion, by addressing General Passenger Agcntk.
PR, Kansas City, No. #
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04
BUDGET OF Fun.

A young man went into Princes saloor
Friday evening, and called fo- u glass o
liquor. 1t was handed to him and then III
dropped little powdered magnesia III i
from paper, swallowed the whole deliber
a,ely, and placing the glass down looked
The attentive Prince in the eye and said: ~
have poisoned myself" WHAT screamed
the Mortified saoon-Eeeeper Il have
poisoned myself repeated the young man
in tragic tone. In an instant Mr. Prince
had bounded tc his side; in theIneXt instant nc
had him on the door, and man sent Tor
doctor The young man struggled to release
himself, and protested that ii was all joke.
Mr. Prince was too old and too educated a
man to be deluded by such articles. lmmedi-
ate remedies were called for. Some one sug
gested a raw egg, and one was procured, and
there being no time to bother with glass and
the victim TO the poison writing to a degree
that made holding HIM an almost impossible
undertaking. it was administered IN the shell
and so adrotly broken that two-thirds of it
went into his shirt bosom. 4 bottle of sweet
OIL was next emptied into him, his head was
briskly rubbed, hot cloths applid to his chest.
and his back warmed with n billiard cue
Then DR.. Miles arrived, took IN the situation
at glance, APPLIED stomach-pump, and
within five minutes the RIGHTEOUSNESS and
other things in that young man were extracted.
On getting to his feet he instinctively felt in
his hip pocket for his handkerchief, and ap.
peared TO DE very much surprised TO find
There. He left the saloon vowing vengeance
against Mr. Prince and his anxious and earn
est helpers. But the story was too much for
him the next day, and he vuietly disappeared
from town,-DdnJuly Ners.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

Nicholas |. was very fond Of masquerade
balls, and one night appeared at one in the
character of the devil, with grinning face
horns and tail, and appeared to enjoy his
character very much. About three O'Clock
in the morning he went out, and throwing
over him some furs, he called acoachman and
ordered him TO take him to the Quay Anglals
As il was very cold he fell asleep, and when
he found that the man had taken him in the
wrong direction, for the Quay Anglais is one
of the most elegant portions of St. Petersburg
while before him were only some miserable
houses Nicholas began to demonstrate. The
coachman paid no heed to him, and passing
through q stone gateway, brought him into a
cemetery, and taking large knife from his
girdle, and pointing it to his employers
throat, said:
Give me your money and your fars, OF |
Will kill you"
And do you give me your soul" exclaimed
Nicholas as he threw of his furs, and dis
closed his personitication of the devil.
The Russians are very superstitious and the
coachman was 50 terrified that he fell sense.
less on the ground, and the Emperor drove
himself back to his palace
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

On one occasion an amateur composer left
a new solo anthem of his with Handel, who
goodnaturedly, asked him 10 breakfast the
next morning. The great German was most
atiable and discoursed on every possible sub
ject, but all attempts to lead the conversation
round to the anthem proved futile. Our
amateur, at last growing desperate, inter
rupted his hosts flowing talk with;
But my anthem, sir-how do you like my
anthem?
"Oh, your anthem? Vel, sir, did tink it
wanted air"
Wanted air, sir?"
Yes, sare-air-so l did hang it out of de
Window
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

1t rained hopelessly. The clouds came
down in sheets and sluiccs. Monsieur Dc
4, an elegant "oi the first water" found
this second water too wet for him. lie was
islanded under another mans pOrtico, and
not 4 hackney coach nor an umbrella within
screaming at. Suddenly around the corner
comes plain citizen, housed under a pro-
Iecting canopy OF blue cotton and whalebone,
but, under this cnviablc umbrella, walking
alone y Il thought seizes Monsieur DE
4. He rushes to the citizens side, and
selling him aifectionately by the arm, com
mcnces an eager narration Ct touching
train of events. Not giving his nstonished
listener time to respond, he hurries il i'm
along, sharing his umbrella, of course, as
he goes, and clinging closely to his side
and vociferatng the confidential com
munications till they arrive at the boulevard
He stops at Il cafe, and then for the first
time apparently, takes surprised iooR
.tthe face ofhis umbrclla-lender. Overwhelm
ing apocgies-had wholly mistaken the
person thought it was his intimate friend -
begs ter thousand pardOns-and lodges into
he safe inside of the cohec-hOusc. But Tho
tun was to be in the telling of the story. II
. couvulsed circle of delighted felloW.dandieS
Monsieur DE Il was telling his adventure
when, by chance, placing his hand on his
neart he missed the usual protuberancc II
his vest pocket The valuable gold Watcl
was gone! In his close clnging 10 the ap
Darently plain citizen the gay joker hat
hugged pickpocket, and-"cOnsequenc'
waS!" But he was subsequently tonder o
"a dry Joke than wet one
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

y youngwife once cured her husband of a
disposition to absent himself from home al
nights by providing him with an excel ent
dinner, andsaying to him ailerward; George
you find a swec;er spot than our home
describe its to me, and will rival it if
die in the attempt" \ kiss and few lear:
completed the victory
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

\ Central Michigan editor, whose death
the Free Press chroniclcd only few months
ago, was probably as persistent man as ever
started out on dun" or looked for new SUD
sciibers. He was once out on jaunt in the
township Of White Oak, Ingham county,
sticking to every farmer until he got his name
and money, and it so happened that he came
to house where death had called few
hours before. The farmers wife was laid out
and the husbandman and his children were
grleving over her loss when the editor
Knocked at the door. e..
whats up" inquired the editor rs he saw
the farmers solemn c0untenance before
him.
my wife is dead" replied the farmer. us
that sou unused the editor little disap.
pointed. Did she die easy?'
dropped off like a lamb"
=. Did she say anything"
Not word-,just went right to sleep like"
II didn't know" continued the editor, sad
look on his face "but what she might have
requested YOU to subscribe for the CdScdde,
which you know is the best paper in the
county. you want it III take your name
right in, and under the circumstances wont
charge cent for the obituary notlcew
The farmer hung off fora while, but before
the editor went away he had two additional
dollars in his pocket, and had written out an
obituary notice for publication in the next
issue which the bereaved husband pro
nounced "a mighty smart piece. '-DetroH
Free Press.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

North Adams, Mas, has tailor long
known for his keen, pungent Wit. Not long
since Il well,known clergyman called at his
shop with Il pair of pantaloons, and asked him
if they could be repaired The knight Of the
shears unrolled them held them up IN most
artistic manner, carefully examined them,
and replied yes, yes the knees are the hes
part of them" The reverend gentleman saw
the joke smiled blandly, and gracefully
bowed himself out"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

There is An old darkcy in Maryland who
lately voted for local option, as he understood
it, but not as the public generally understood
it. The story "a true one runs thus: At q
recent election friend asked the old man
how he was gong to vote. "Oh" lie replied
The Republican .ticket. | always cote that
ticket" But how are you going 10 vote on
local option" The darGey, looking up
asked, whats dat:" Why, local option is
puttsng down liquor was the reply. "Lors
massey! said the darkey, "of course
vote for local option; | votes to put down
liquor to the old price, fib-penny-bit pint
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

y modest young husband in New York
sent the following message over the wires to
friends in this city the other day: See ninth
chapter of Isaiah, sixth verse" The dusty
old bible was hauled down in an instant. and
the above chapter and verse were hunted out
and found to explain all. The verse reads
For unto us a child is born-unto us son IS
Given - C0luHtb,fS Ne,rS
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

Jones and Brown were talking lately Of a
young clergyman whose preaching they had
heard that day. What do YOU think Of
him :" asked Brown. Il think" said Jones,
he did better, two years ago" Why,
he didn't preach then" True, said Jones
tina; is what mean"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

A Danbury boy reporting small poX in
school was kept at home one day, but his
father, nqurng into the facts, sent him to
school next day. He anXiously inquired of Il
fellow pupil from the sixth ward where he
could get the small poy; nc wanted to bother
father and die, to let him know that he meant
thlnGS.N
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

you're the eancst man ever saw said
an Alabama judge to a lank and starved
looking culprit; "wlat were broughtup on ~
On a charge of vagrancy, I believe, your
honor" was The meek reply
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

1t i getting into the churches The sexton
Of a Baptist church in Troy has walked OF
with teo thousand dollars of the pew rents
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

A student in one of the New York colleges
was charged by the Faculty with having a
barrel of ale deposited in his room, contrary
of course, to rule. He received IA summons
to appear before the president who said:
Sir, am informed that You have barrel
Of ale in your room
Yes, sir"
well, what explanation can you make:
why, the fact is, sir, nay physician advised
me to try little ale each day as tonic, and
not wishing to stop at the various places
where this beverage is retailCd, determined
to have barrel taken to my room"
Indeed. And have you derived any benefit
from t."
"Ah yes, sir. When the barrel was first
taken to my room, few weeks since, could
scarcely lift it. Now | can carry it with the
greatest ease
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04

Wlbn a mans nose becomes little reddish
/, ought 10 be pulled like other redishes
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04
YOUNG LION

A Canadian French Stallion, years old, stands
1874 hands high weighs 400 lbs; n jet Black
with very heavy name and tail; for splerdid bone
style and actions, he is acknowledged by compe-
tent horsemcn to be the best horse OF his class
that was ever raised in Canada
PEDIGREE.-Young Lion sired by Occur dc
Lion, dam by Black Diamond, a mare That could
trot in 2.40, and a winner on the turf.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-04-04
HAZZS
Ottawa. March %, 1873

Every increases the popularity of this valuable Hair
Preparation which is due to merit alone We
our old patrons that II kept fully up its high standard
and only reliable aud perfected preparation for
storing GRAY FADED HAZE 10 Its youthful color making
IL soft usrous and sken. The scalp by its use becomes
white and clean 1t removes all eruptions and daudruh
and its tonic properties prevents the hair from falling
out stimulates and nOurshes the by its
the capillary glands to their normal vgor and viii
create new growth except in extreme old II is the
most economical HAIR DRESSING ever used II requires
fewer Applications and gives the hair splendid glossy
pearauce A. A. Hayes, NJ d. state Assayer OF Massachu
Sets says he constituents are pure and carefully select
ed for excellent quality and consider II the BKsr PREPA
RATION for its intended purposes"
SOldbyaH Hipq9ists ana DedlsfS ip Msdch@.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10

iufkiur IN ths.ysism 81 80 many thousands, Art
ss~ciua.lf destroyed Agd removed. n. sYstsm
of m.dlciHa. 10 vefni'uees. 10 sathsinihities
will ffes tht system from worns Ike these Bit
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10

Hesdarhc, am sd the Sho8llers, Coughs. Tight
ue-r ~ toe Guest, ilzziaes-, Soar Eruct.ts,us
a. thr stomach, Bad i.-fe 80 the Mouth, BHiuus
Attack Ps,piisu0n uf tha Heat IHHam alton Of
the Lung, PIN H tne region nt the Kdueys.
and Enaafsd other painful. rymploms are the
offspruRs 1f Uy-pepsia OUe bottle will prove
= baittT guarantee Of lts merits than a lengthy
alEnrLLtnmnMl
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10
For Female Complaints.

III Young ~ ga. raayr~a ~ SINGLE. ~ the dawn
q ~0maubsa4 % the tura q 4fr. the Tonic
h.ttsfs display dee.aea a. iuhueuce that i'm
rfaFeEusA4 - ssuH BeIetUtlusr.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10

Al T. PERKINS sTORE,
agnleITA ERk AlhlN HALL
MANCHESTER. VERMONT
Msy us faaua al tinds 81
= '"4 =" a''@ '''''' N'''' -
Oils Colors.
ulsh. Japan. Lime, Plaster,
N''' A'Nf''
CARPENTERS AND hASoNS' TOOLS
4 Lot OF New "heei'BArro~s
Picture Frames and MauIdinss. and
PICTURES FRAMED TO ORDER
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10
Rim DONALD Co.

fstugss-ls aa4 0sasfar tuis. SAL Ffauessao,
Is artia aud uas. 3 Esal-gt9u snd hsflt5n
Sc See YORK 1Aa1ml st.A 4
soLD 81 AL DRUGGISTS AID DEALEks
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10
Bilious, Remiitent, and Intermittent
Fevers,

which are 40 prevalent ~ the valleys Of our great
rivers throughout the United States. especially
those o. the Mississippi, Ohio Missouri, Illinois,
Tennessee, Cumberland, ArkausAs, He'd, Col IA
do, Brszos, Rio Graude, Pearl, Alabama, Mobile,
savannah, Roanoke, James. snd many Others,
with their vast tributaries, throughout our GU
tire country during the Summer aud Aulumn,
and remarkably 50 duiug seasons Of uuusual
heat aud dryue-s. are invariably accompanied
by extensive arrangements Of the stomach and
hver, and other abdominal yi-cera, In their
treatment, Iurgstive, ,XertiuR q powerful in
Aneuce upon these various organs, In essential
} necessary. There In un cuhartlc for the pur-
pose rqnal tu DE !. WALBEB's VINEGAR BtTTERs.
they viii speedily rem tFe the DARK color, Il
yiscd matter with which he bowels are loaded,
1t the same time stimulating the seeretlens "
the liver, and generally restoring the healthy
functions of the digestive organs.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10

20 INVENTORS No charges for
attAHsaE Fafruts ualess sasarsstul Pam
.altt- free ASIAN. no Ifpuiaat o.. Bs-teu
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10
EINEGAR BITTERS.

VNEGAR BIrTERs.
PURELY VEGETABLE.
FREE FROM ALCOHOL.
DH. J. NktkEE's California ElStuAB BITTEHs
are purely Vegetable preparation, made ohtehy
from the nstiye herbs fuuui on the lower ranges
af the Sierra Nevada mountains Of California, the
medicinal propuues Of which are extracted
there rom Ihuut the use of cohog. The gues.
ton ia sluiust daily asked, What ID the cause Of
the unparalleled saccpss u VINEGAR BlrrERs 2"
Oar answer h., that they remove the cause Of
disease, aud the patient RECEIVERS his health
They are tAo great blond painter aud ilergiy.
ius principle, perfect Eeuoystor ard Invigora.
Tor OF the system. Never before ia the histoy,
of tho world ma, medicine been compounded
po--rs-lne the remarkable qu lilies Of yNEeAR
BUnRs ia healing the sick 81 every disease man
IL heir 10. They are d gentle pureatye a. well
a- Tonic relieving Congestion or Inflammation Of
the Liver and vlseerai Organs, in Bilious III
srs-es
DE. WALKERS CALIFORNIA VINEGAR BrrrEHs
act ON all these cases 10 similar manner BY
purifying the Blood they remove the cause, aud
by resolving away the effects of the inflammation
,the tubereuar deposits the affected parts re-.
ceiye health, aud permanent cure is effected
If men will enjoy good health,
let them use VINEGAR BIrrEgs "a, a medicine and
avoid the use Of alcoholic stmuIAnts in every
form.
Grateful Thousands
proclaim YiSEaAR BIrrERs the most wonderful
lnvigorant that ever sustained the sinking rys.
tom.
No Person can take these Btters
according to directions, and remain long unwelL
provided their bones ale not destroyed by min
ersl poison or other means, and vital organs
wasted beyond repair.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10

according to dtreetious and remain long unwelL
provided their bones ale not destroyed by min
ersl poison or other means, and vital organs
wasted beyond repair
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1874-12-10
If men will enjoy good health,

/ proclaim YfSEaAR BnrERs the most wonderful
I lnvigorant that ever sustained the sinking rys
The Grange advance., 1874-08-26
RfklM BROTHERS.

Something / saw exhibited in the win
dow attracted my attention. and induc-
ed me to enter the shop Of Messrs. REX
lam Brothers. It was certainly not the
ticket inscribed, 'tFirst floor to let, un-
furnished" it was rather, if I remember
rightly,a delicate little taxa Of genuine
Venetian class; curiousiy designed and
rich in dainty opaline tints and refec-
tions. I was in humble way. and for
my own qualification simply, . collector
Of trifles ofathat4 that kinds The Messrs.
Reklam were German jews or Polish,
I'm not sure which dealing in old pic
lures, curiosities, articles Of yirtu, and
antiquities. Their houseTwas situated
in dull street in the Soho district
Fashion and gentility had, no doubt, in
times past made their home there; they
had long since vanished, however, leay-
ing in their stead sort of fdingy respec-
liability. and an air loftrade Of rather ;
torpid character. Shops and private
houses were very much intermingled,
but there were few evidences of business
being very actively carried on. The
street could not boast much trafic, for
although thoroushfare, lit led to no
where in particular, and offered small
advantages as ashort-cut. *It was bound
ed on the north by Oxford street, and
on the south by an intricate Stanele
Of courts and alleys. The houses wers
Of substantial, spacious, old!fashioned
class, with rather dimly lit rooms. 4
The. contents Of the shop almost defy
enumeration, They were such, howev-
er,I @ are usually to be- foudd in the
possession Of traders in curioeitie1, had
been collected hcm III parts of the
Alobe, and pertaihed sto every period,
Nth the exception, perhaps Of the
,pFe=ent. There we're Weapons and, Ar.
nor, of 3 course, In bundance,
with carvings in wood and ivory, paint
mgs and enamels, china and glass, geiinsy
coins, embroi ideries, lace, antique fnr.
Aiture, feathers, idols, stuffed animals,
Akinl nonstrosities of al kinds, and;
other multitu udinous object Iwss sim.'
pm 1sed BY sthe.extent and value ofths
collection. Il filed tho shop qaite ttoI
ID remote corners, leaSEing only s little,
~ TIL of yaeency int tie Scentt1 81 the
Even the ~ ccffbSsd1tesds
nd m oouI pro oDcieus tllii s.,l
z f1lIl llent lamps 1aarys
ds5 "a =; -. ~ u thst 1etrs e..
ssli S
( Z
The Grange advance., 1874-08-26
T'HIaz OLD IIONIEsTEAD..

y: ess sss5f 81 An old brown house, 81 81 .s
I Stands gravely facing, on the busy way,
/ Its brooding roof o 'ercroWned with moses
with shsltesing I elm trees syaying DER
{ Grooming unmeasured cadence evermore !;
:: And the swift sun, down-t threading thro'
+ ;;.s..i. -. the leaves ~ sssSa6 E: rs ss3s
With golden fingers brightly interweayes
= The dark and gloomy caves. = ~
:. ~ -. - That lonely house to me s. =
Has strange ,charm-'tis like a poem
-. /, weird = T.. II 5335s =
Like rude land mark Of the: past, up
f.n-,4,l g reared ;5Sfts' y -, ! ! :. :,
Z, In those proud days Of modern tower and
H.. dome, S# Il - ss&.
As record Of the plain old fashioned
Quiet and calm as Eden the brown nest!--;
With brooding roof aslopes to the red
y. ~ Gray as adove's sweet bre> st! %
o, brown old home of old 4! g.::r. =.
Along thy garden wall the swallow flies, =
Dwarf, grass-grown pansies peer with pur-
pie eyes, ,. '.s..
By the crystal we'll :; golden @fruited trees
. Lean DER the fence in the delicious breeze,
Just as they leaned in that transcendent
r. morn, ~
When Hopes young buds, rose tinted with
-" the dawn. -@sS' f">3
Unfolded years agone! 4 !.
Once twas home so fair! s.. Z.
1.nnr LANSING vears nf S11r, and cohlniu ~
Have beat against the rattling window
pane, 49,
And yet there clingeth round the broken
door,
A sweet white rose, by fond hands trained
ofyore
In faint memorial round these crumbling
walls, 80
And her sweet name recalls.
Once a bright home belovedl
In sombre shadow are familiar roolus,
Low walls, small window panes; the
Of twilight, touching with soft tenderness
The quaint oak ceiling, like kind caress !;
Once how the sun came shining in that
door. #Sn 49,
A by the noon marks on the snowy
floor, 90 'A
Where the children play no more !
.. Who'd dream it once was bright
Marrow and steep seems now the winding
stair,
In that deep window niche a mother
chair
Stood as she softly crooned the evening
49, hymn; s-'>
And this is Daisy's dainty room grown
dim
Alas the household names are never
spoken!
And the deft spider spins his. thread un-
broken
On cornice quaint and oakenl
Yes the old house to-day
Wears grave meaning on its ancient face,
These weather marks have suggestive
grace,
The tented elms, with royal arms aloof,
Sweep with sigh about the broken roof,
For thus, amid the iretting of decay,
Passes IS surely from the bright to-day,
Our ''earthly home" away
rs ...., 1t~Fs-E. N. 3, II.