Knoxville journal. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1874-1986, 1874-12-31
WHAT JOHNNY DID In THE DARK.
a Christm.AS story for the Little Folks.
BIZ RossITER w. RAYMOND.


This tale Is calculated to do good to the
young. As for grown-ups, they're set; and
YOU can't do them any good If you try But
every truly we'll behaved boy, whose shoe
strings are properly tied and whose hair is
parted on the side, but not on the back of
his head, and every nice girl, who don't
wear high heels or carry too large fan,
will derive great profit from the story j am
gong to tell AS for believing it, my dear
young friends, you may do as you like about
that. III ysu are acquainted with all the
principal rivers, mountains, cities, bounda-
ries, capes, oceans, islands, populations and
staple productions in the geograp ~, you
know 80 much more than do that fear you
viii despise my narrative. But whether you
believe 1t or not, ! tell you it will do you
good; for while you are listening to 1t 1t will
keep you out OF miSchief-and to be kept out
of mischief, rs the best historians agree, il q
blessing that don't happen always To every
body. And ia order that you NAV carry with
you clear recollection of what ! say, | shall
treat my title just like the text of sermon,
according to the best models: Subject, What
Johnny Did In the Dark; first head, What
Johnnss second head, DID,: third head,
What Johnny Did; fourth head, In the Dark |;
fifth head Did IN the Dark. sixth head,
What .Johany Did IN the Dark; seventh
head. Coas ,eq,ssnces and Application. Another
great advantage OF this arrangement is, that If
marks you will know just whereabouts am
when you wake up. / have tried this plan in
church, and it works very well. The only
disadvantage Of the arrangement i have
adopted is that some OF the heads seem to
have very little sense in them; but, bless me!
II you get seven heads together anywhere,
some OF thsm will lack sense. That isn't my
fault, therefore; it's human nature.
To begin, then: What JohnnHf Why,
Johnny Cooper, OF course. I'll warrant If
you had lived within three blocks Of him you
wouldn't have to ask. If he had never called
on you formally, his ball would have visited
you more than once through the basement
window. pane, and his china alleys would
have rolled down your cellar grating, and ten
to one some time or other pieces of his panta-
looms would have been found waving like
little flags from the sharp points of your iron
fence. II here was long, slippery place on
the sidewalk in winter that gave your heels
a b autiful chance to inspect the sky, you
might be sure Johnny Cooper was one Of the
boys that had polished it for slide. You
would have seen ham also, on bright winter
mornings, pulling his sled to school. For, as
the poet has beautifully observed,
Johnny had q little sled
To use when there was snow,
And everywhere that Johnny went
The sled was sure to goi
Why will people be SO absurd as to clear
Off their sidewalks in the winter clear down
to the bare stone? II is enough to make any
fellow angry, when he is hauling sled with
a girl on 1t, to Come to such a disgusting
spot as that! There Is only one consolation
ii does polish the runners, that's fact!
The girl on Johnny's sled was Chicken
Little. She was Johnny's sister; and her real
name was-upon my word I've forgotten what
II was Everybody called her Chicken Little;
and you couldn't have heard any other name
If you had listened year. You would have
- In, Aha M ia a
Bible, and there you would have found, be-
side, the names OF William and Susan
= Cooper the elder brother and sister. William
was the eldest of all. He used TO be called
Bill, to my certain knowledge; but at the
time OF my story he was eighteen, and wore
fancy necktie, and carried cane, and fire.
quenfly felt OF his upper-lip; and l should
like to see the person who would have dared
TO call him Bill. The family compromised on
"WiIi,n and the cook said " Mr.. William"
And IL was much the same with Miss susan,
who Was two years younger. She studied
Mental Philosophy, went to parties, aud
wrote 10 her friends In very large, slanting
gram at the top. But can't undertake TO
describe all the Coopers to you; have said
enough TO answer the question, Whaf
Johanyf
NJ second head is Do. and perhaps ysu
wonder what can be made out OF that But
i haven't listened 10 sermons LOT notnluS
DID my friends, is word indicating den.
mite past time; and the question arse, Wnai
timef Well 1t sas Oh istnas Eve. But pa
involves another thing besides time, and that
Is, place. The place was partly IN the BED
partly in the hall, partly on the stairs, partly
In the parlor, and altogether In the dark.
Now, putting my frt and second heads 10
gether-fyr two leads are better than one
you know---I obtain my third head, VIA
yoibany Dill Ny wife says this is ridiculous
just like spelling TO stantinopie--C-O-s con-
there's your CON; STAN, stan. there's your
STAN, there's your CoSsTAS-and so forth
She don't reflect that she may be making fun
q The outline of the discourse VI seine excel
lent Turkish missionary. Her objection does
not trouble me at all What Johnny ID q
mean, now, bef re he came to the Dark was
to Quarrel with everybody In the house and
get himself emit To bed In disgrace III Is re-
msrkable how easily boy who, in the main
means we'll and does pretty well, can getint
mood in which eve ythipg goes VT ng' ano
he among the rest; SO that he IL dlrobehieh
to his father, and su Ky TO his niother, ana an
imp If mi~chlef To his big brother, ai'd tor'
ment TO his elder sister, and heetoring bun,
TO bis Ii tie sister, and horrid nuisance v
the e.. k-aBd so on, 10 the cats and uogs aho
all the oys that live on The block. drowl
folks get into such tantrums, too; bur N toy'
Il is very naughty, and they have 10 be put u