The Placer herald., 1874-04-18
AUBURN, PLACER COUNTY, CALIFORNIA APRIL 1S. 1874

and well, and let the argument of the late
Missus Finchs gravestone' weigh in Mr..
Finch's favor"
''lt's az well enough for you to laugh, ;"
said |, Indignantly; but if you were in my
place, you'd think differently of it. How
am going 70 get rid of the wretch What
under the sun possessed Uncle JotLam to
send him off down here? l never was so
provoked in all my life, neverp'
"Ill tell you what I'll do" said Bell,
after silence of minute or two. "He
doesn't know how you look, and if | were to
pass myself off as you, he'd never know
the difference. I'll be Susan if you'll be
Bell, and I'll get rid of Mr.. Finch for you" ="
eff you only would" cried |.
81 will, answered Bell, her eyes spark
ling with anticipated pleasure; "Im going
to make Mr.. Finch think that I'm deaf
deaf as post. Oh my won't it be jolly,
though ?"
Bell leaned back in her chair, and laughed
till her sides ached.
Monday morning Mr.. Finch came.
We took good look at him from the
window as he came up the path. He was
little man, with red hair, and no eyes to
speak of. The poor gentleman had evident
ly got on his best Sunday clothes, and look
ed i'll at ease in consequence. Perhaps bis
mission helped to make him nervous.
"From this time forth, as long as he
stays, l am deaf, remember" said Bell,
warningly. Il shant be able to hear any
thing short or respectable scream"
went to the door.
els this Miss Susan Spencer?" asked
Nr Finch, as he entered.
susan is in the sitting-room, | answered.
81 il introduce you. You are MI. Finch,
aren't you p
les'm; Caleb Finch" he responded, so
solemnIy that wanted to giggle
took him into the sitting room where
Bell was.
"Susan," said l, in loud voice, "ths is
Mr.. Finch"
81 don't hear what you say" said Su-
san, turning her ear toward me. "Speak a
little louder, if you please"
"This is Mr. Finch~ screamed I, in her
ear. thought must laugh, to see how
horrifed Mr.. Finch looked
"Im glad to see you, Mr.. Finch" said
"Susan," with beamng smile. "Take
chair bring it close, if you please, because
| am slightly afflicted with deafness. How
are the chdren?"
Pretty well, answered Mr.. Finch, taking
seat beside her.
"Louder, if you please said "Susan, !"
presenting her ear.
"Pretty well, answered Mr.. Finch, in a
fair war-whoop.
| managed to keep my face turned the
other way, and had hard work to keep from
screaming.
81 was touched at what Uncle Jotham
wrote about your kindness to your late wife,
said "Susan," with fond glance into Mr.
Finch's face. "What did she die of ?"
Congestion of the brain " answered Mr.
Finch, his voice about two octaves higher
than its usual pitch.
81 didn't hear" said "Susan." A trhe
louder, Mr.. Finch"
Mr.. Finch repeated his reply in SO loud a
tone that be got red in the face with the ex-
ertion its utterance caused.
"Ahw
"Susan' comprehended at last.
els she always so? p he asked, turning to
me, and wiping his face vigorously with a
big red and yellow handkerchief.
"She isn't quite as deaf all the time" |
answered, demurely.
Pretty soon Mr. Finch made another at
tempt at conversation
"You have a very pretty place here" he
shouted.
eyes, groceries are pretty dear, respond
ed "Susan." You're right about that, Mr..
Finch"
"Pretiy place." explained Mr.. Finch,
getting desperate. Pretty place here p
and he waved bis hand toward the garden
and grounds.
EYES, l know" said "Susan," mourn
fully; "but it could not be helped, sup
pose.
Mr.. Finch cast dosparing glance at me.
| had to leave the room. | could stand it
no longer.
When was safely outside the door |
laughed till | could laugh no more. |
could only chuckle in kind of faint imitation
of laugh. hadn't strength enough left
for the genuine article.
As sat there l heard Mr.. Finch shout
ing in his highest tones to "Susan," who
always had to have everything repeated to
her. 1t wasn't long before he began to get
hoarse, for she kept him busy. A dozen
times, while we were eating dinner, ! thought
| must laugh; it was SO comical to see "Su-
san" not a muscle of her face relaxing
from its dignifed look, holding out her ear
for Mr. Finch to repeat bis remarks in it.
He couldn't have eaten his dinner, il be had
IA the best of appetites
"All the afternoon "Susan" kept him
# ng by her could see the poor man,
hlf tired out, casting furtive glances at the
| clock
AT last he got up, and beckoned me to
come out into the hall.
81 think | shall be goin' back, be said,
with sigh that indicated how great bis dis
1Ou,V