St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1874-06-12
Squibs.

JayncSville has an educated pig call
ed Ben Hutlcr. There is chance for
libel suit t-on the part of the pig.
The cnitor of Il Nashville paper is ac-
cuScd by his ncighbors of having caught
cold while sleeping in church with his
pew door open.
An editor. who speaks with the air of
Il man who has discovered IL new fact
aN experience. says that the new way
10 prevent bleeding ut the nose is to
keep yom nose ont of other peoples
business.
indianapolis boasts of IL versatile di-
Nimity student who breaches in English,
plaN> i'll Armenian. sings in Turkish,
and holds his tongue i'll eleven other
languages.
y Young lad tell into mud-puddle
"if' curh>tonc in Detroit the other lav.
and he waS howling and wailing. when
another boy came along and remarked
''iumph, guess I'd not howl Just be-
rIIlse fell in the mud" That amt
what I'm howling about" blubbcred the
boy. I'm cryin. cause my brother is
sick"
y school boys tuothache commences
1t : \. NJ; reaches its highest altitude
At SID. when the pain is intense to an
extraordinary degree. commences to
Nuh>ide 1T 9. and after that disappears
with Il celc1ty that must he very COM
Portable to the sufferer. If at night that
boy hasn't got fouI quarts of walnuts
spread ont to dry upstairs. it is be-
cau>e there is no place upstairs to do
L.
y little hoy waS recently presented
with Il toy trumpet, to which he became
greatly attached. One night. when he
was about to he put i'll his little bed,
and waS ready to say lis PRAYERS. he
iIandcd the trumpet to his grandmother,
saying. - Here, gran'ma. you blow while
pray"
TAKE SOMETHING.-A Saratoga cler-
Symam married Il couple the other
night, and ut the conclusion of the GER
rmony the new made husband dove
down into the mysterious depths of an
old valise. and producing il bottle sang
out: Elder. have some gIn lis
said. tax little suthin' for stomach's
sake, You know" 1t suddenly occurred
10 the Elder that he had another ap-
pontment. and accordingly he bowed
himself out.
At Il recent Sunday school service,
the clergyman was illustrating the ne
ccSSity of Christian profession in order
properly to enjoy the blessings of Prov
idcncc in this world and, to make il
apparent to the youthful mind, he said.
For instance, | want to introduce wal
ter into my house. | turn it on. The
pipes and faucets and every conven-
fence are i'll good order. but | get no
water Cn any of you tell me why
do not get any water" He expected
ihe children to see that it was because
he had not made IL connection with the
main i'll the street. The boys looked
perpleXed. They could not see why
the water should refuse to run into his
premises after such taultless plumbing.
Can mo one tell me what have ncS-
lccted ,! reiterated the good man, look
ing over the flock of wondering faces
bowed down by the weight of the prob
lem. Il know, squeaked little five
year old. You don't pay up"
\ wellknown organist whose reputa-
tion as Il jokist is well established, once
received Il dmnning letter from a legal
firm, with this inscription on the envel-
ope:-
"Return i'll ten days if not called for.r
At the expiration of the ten days he
returned it, with the following note OH
the margin =
81 have kept this ten days, and, there
having been no call for it, return it,
agreeable to your request