Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1874-02-14
Murray" Of the Danbury News. UpOn
the Investigators and News
naner ROW.

y
wit himself, but he draws TO his paper, by the
force of affinity, bright and witty correspond
ence fIom all quarters. From this city George
Alfred Townsend sends a brilliant column or
two semi-occas onally, and the regular Wash
ington correspondent of the Mes, who signs
himself Murray" knows how 20 state facts
with point and hUmOr, as witness the following
excerpts:
"Here We are, involved in all the intricacie,
OF othcial etiquette, and staggering under the
weight OF fashionable reSponsi bilities-the ger
man, receptions, calls, and cOcktails-to be
slapped in the stomach by another inyestiga
ton. We are not unnecessarily sensitive in that
region, but such underhanded blows tend 10
connTm growing want OF confidence in human
nature. And What should we saw about the
newspaper blowers who gut us tor items and
knock Us in the head with inform Atom Not
content with turning us inside out for public
dedication, these worthy gentlemen think IL
desirable to turn US upside Down. Now, whll-
there can be no reasonable objection TO an &C
caslonal Inspection OF our concrete and wooden
bottom, We submit that IL is a little too much "a
expect US TO remain standing on our head for
the general amusement more than half tn,
tme-wlthout grumhngor other remuneration
Therefore We erumhte. And vet, rather thai.
deprive Newspaper Row OF District mutton W
would consent TO almost any adjustment. Ga
AFFAIRS appear 10 stimulate the journalistic i'm
agInation. We personally believe IN an elasti
currency. We want 20 see il reach that degre
of elasticity in which a one dollar note can b
made TO cover a months board. In this hon
we have drawn no small consolation from read
ing the various accounts OF our financial status
a few statements of debt ranging from six, ten
twenty, and twenty-five million, have gained
the immortality of our scrap book. One, placins
the District insolvency at fifty millions, we have
had framed and hung up with a choice collec-
ton of speeches on imitation. Possibly il is to-
much TO bore for currency so elastic as our
financial obligations.
HOW WE INPLATR.
1t was ste2mirg hot day last summer when
q a uA q hn
resents so many newspapers they couldn't be
inserted in the directory. He had been rudely
acSosted by an upfeeling landlady for an ar
CRY wesher-woman every moment for the addi-
tional quarter of dollar. We found him,
therefore, in iii aneial state Of mind.
"Hano il all. Murray" says he, psusing in
the middle Of article he was making up from
the city papers, the seventeen copies of which
TO seventeen different country paperswas 70 net
him seventeen elastic dollars.
Chang IT all; / was just trying to think what
here?"
In fact, to risk statement that might possibly
add to my personal discomfort hereafter-but /
had seen 1t variously estimated from one to ten
million above the legal allowance.
It'll be safe 10 say nearer twenty million,
probably" says he, looking at his watch, and
apparently specializing on the movements of
woman across the way-"probably s2l 49,
$500 ne added, musingly, ms eye still on the
!" Probably, j" we said,- put it % cents, even
change"
He caught at the idea. Speaking of d
cents, how are you of for funds, Murray
There's that internal old woman over there
been dunniDg me Tor week-and here she
comes now, d-n her. Can't you let me have
little till the end Of the month";
We promised 10 do 30 il he would but abate
that odd cent, with which he complied. But
we afterwards saw, in one of the seventeen
newspapers, that il a financial freak he had
added the unit 70 the ofter end
Inasmuch as il hath been fsirly shown that a
9 national debt is national blessing" and it is
indisputable that in obedience TO this law de-
faulters have risen TO emInence in proportion
TO their Investments, why may we not Initiate,
throw of the sordid gold which binds us to
earth and press onward and upward
THE NEW INVESTIGATION.
And now comes Corcoran, the country cor
respondents and Congressional committee TO
stand Us on our metaphoTical head again, while
they 60 through us Tor our spare change. An
investigation Is movement to which we are
not wholly unaecust med. IL Is a very different
thing from trial before o regular court-whicn
always settles somei hing or some body, right or
wrong. An inyestig alton, while IL serves 10
keep mp lively interest, settles nothing. IL
imagine q great deal more in the background;
If they don't IL is still easier 10 make believe Of
completely and wbitewashing. Then, when IL
ed trash is added to what has gone before and
which has doubtless never been read by any
human being att the proof reader, and the
expenses OF the commlttee, Win Cicik anu
shorthand report r, have been footed by pa
tent and loDg-su tfering country.then, per
haps, everybody i'll be satisfied until dearth
OF sensation shall prompt fresh set Of memo
rislisfs "a begin sgain. In the meantime we are
Charmed to witness the spirit of fairness in
which we are being handled by the press, and
not 4 little am used as well as indignant to note
the conc. usions. With property going up TO and
steady at double prices; with firm, progress
upright and spirited local press, aud with an
eDtefprising, go-ahead majority Of Substantial
citizens-this city win stand the pressure of 4
great many idle ISLANDERS from abroad, and a
great many malicious investig atoms at home.
Yet We may say, like the parrot that came from
under the bed, after having contest with the
cat, in which eyes and feathers were quite lib
orally distributed around the room, and greeted
It's astobished master with, "Ohl we've been
having b-n Of a time!"
Why THIS SRcREoY?-It IL believed that the
dissection Of the union between the bodies Of the
Siameee twins began yesterday morning, In
Philadelphia, but as yet no facts have been 90.
tanned regarding It. Everything conducted
with the Rreateet tecrecy, not even ne nsuows
Of the college of physiciane being eomieeeo 20
+ the Opernfion. Which In bofnR pGfI0rmoo solely