The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-06-05
FACTS AND FANCIEs.

i
much did Won steal ?" "Well, i may as
we'll confess TO your riverence for the
whole stack, for am going after the
rest tonight,
-"IfI save ten cents a day from my
drinks" ruminated old Rednose, ut
will be $50. so year, and in fifty years
it will be 81, ,S25, and then can marry
Mary. Dear Mary T.
A fish farmer in Illinois gets seven
ty five cents per pound for his trout ;
| thus a small string OF fish will bring as
much as n sheep, and they require
neither grain, hay nor stabling.
A prominent public Office in Nash
vile has this notice posted mp Don't
open this door; :" under which some wag
wrote the query, "Why p and another
responded, &" Because, d-n IL, you
can't its locked"
A little boy few days ago under
took to see il he could lift himself by
hanging on a mules tail. He found
out ali about il, and the doctors think
the skin on his forehead will grow up,
but will leave bad scar.
He unblushingly admits that il was
one of the most ecstatic moments OF his
life when the doctor laid his hand upon
his shoulder, and sadly whispered,
" Her voice is irretrievaDly gone. She
will never speak again"
A gentleman Of Louisville has
dog-a pointer. The dog ran mp tho
steps of house and refused to come
down. His master followed, and found
"a. Partridge" on the doorplate. This
illustrates the force of instinct.
Hon. Jefferson Davis attended re-
cent ex tmination Of deaf and dumb
children in London, and Earl Granville
introduced him as distinguished
stranger who wished to inform himself
of the method of their education
Another Yankee wants the govern
meat to pay him handsomely for pro-
cess he has invented for making IL rain
wherever and whenever he pleases.
'Tis well the stars are mp 40 high,
Or some designing ass
Would soon propose to take them down
Aud light the world with gas.
A Cincinnati reporter says that
there is something grand in the sight
of pair of runaway horses, but tho
Detroit Free Press believes that n good
deal depends on whether n man IL on
a fence or trying to climb over the end
board of the wagon.
A bill has been introduced in the
Canadian parliament 10 make each
newspaper writer esronsible to the law
for his articles, so that, If an editor
could prove that he had not written
particular article, he would not be lia-
BILE to punishment for It,
A Cairo girl played game of euchre
with a young man to see If she should
marry him. He won, and then she
threw herself into his arms, exclaiming,
AZ am thine-forever thine?' As soon
as the unhappy youth could extricate
himself he robbed bank and started
east.
1t is said that Robert Dexter, Of
the New York Bonner, has refused an
offer of 800, 000 for his trotting horse
Ledger. or words 20 tho' effect. Ono
of these fine days that horse is going 60
lie down and die, and his owner will
feel that he has made a dropsical fool
of himself.
A regulation black and-tan poodle,
TO be worth 800, must have head
about the size Of black walnut; eyes
that stand outside of their sockets
tail about the size of lead pencil, aud
legs so attenuatad that the animal falls
over on his back every time he lifts his
head to bark.
A California editor says he can
stand it 10 hear tourists from the Allan
tic seaboard, who come ont TO the
Pacific coast, talking about " San joey
duinn," "San Josey," Stanislouse,
and the like, but when they begin ask
ing questions about Mount Shyster'
he wants TO be off.
A company have purchased one
thousand six hundred acres OF land near
Butte des Morts, Wisconsin, which is 10
be devoted exclusively 10 the raising Of
muskrnts. Last year about four thou
sand rats were captured on this territory,
and it is estimated that six thousand
will be this year.
A literal minded youngster was
picked up by a visitor of the family
who, dandling him on his knee, said
II wish had this little boy think
there's money in him." To which
promptly replied the child 81 know
there is, for / swallowed a cent when |
was Mt grandma's the other day."
A Detroit gentleman prides himself
on his fine fowls, and his neighbor IL
equally vain of fine coach dog. The
A lew days ago the owner Of the dog re-
ceived the following note Friend
You keep dogs. keep chickens. If my
chickens worry your dogs, shoot EN-"
At the last gran ball in Wyoming,
one young lady was attired in bun
grosgrained buck-skin dress, with army
blanket overskirt, bottom looped up
with buckskin strings cut bias. Hair
dressed In Red Cloud, in which were
twined n few sprigs of sage brush, the
whole secured behind in a bunch with
a handsome pin made with a pine splin-
ter and bufIalo's ear.
BY n return just issued the area Of
London is 100 square miles. The river
is crossed by seventeen bridges. Tho
average daily supply Of water is 5l4,-
800 metric tons, and the annual ratable
value of property is coo, 900, 900 ateil-
ing. Last year the number OF births
was 12l 100 in fifty-three weeks, OF p
2S5 weekly; and, as the deaths were
70, ,654, or ,44G weekly, the excess of
bir hs over deaths was 43, 466, or S39
weekly.
AT the present time the postal
rates between France and this country
are 80 high that it is cheaper for letters
between the countries 70 he hrbt sent
to England, then re-transmitted TO
their destination, either France or the
United States, than for letters to be
carried direct by the French mails.
And there is an agency in London
which makes money 10y undertaking
this business of re-transmitting letters
between the two countries.
Another horrible scene in tho
British royal family. The Duchess Of
Edinburgh had borrowed the Princess
of Wales crimping-irons. In returning
them she presented the hot ends 10 her
royal highness, who thoughtlessly took
hold of them, and then waltzed around
with one hand between her knees for
several minutes before she could speak.
Eye-witnesses of the occurrence express
their belief that the days Of the Russian
empire are numbered.
"0ur Weights"
Under this head the London Medical
Record says Upon the average, boys
% hfrth vvaiuh litf1a moro and aFtFla Ia