The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1874-08-11

In the thlckest or the musS.
The mosquito OF the season was cspl
tured near Newark, N j., recently, taf-
ter killing two dogs and biting off nins
inches of his Captor's ear.-N, r aAoi;..
The death is reported of an Ohio
Judge, the originator of the expression.
"If the court knows herself and sne
thinks she do."'-St Louis Journal I
"Are there any fools in this townY'
asked stranger ofa newsboy, recently.
II don't know" replied the boy; .whyu
are you lonesome ?'-Detroit Free
Press ----',.-,-.7,-z--..r -:-.seesElssssrl.e
Said Young America to his paps..
"pa, be you q Britisher ?" 'sYcs. nv
son, was born In England "Well,
we whipped you," retorted the young
ster. ia 1"es
"John," says Mrs. Wehaverenteda-:
cottage to her coachman at the Brancha
''drive to the depot, quickly. The train.
is coming and l must show, my new
clothes" - - IA Al y
81 want you to retract what you said.
in this moTning's Herald. or I}will cut
your bloody heart out" is a specimen
Of the notes received by the enteFprisz
ing local of the Dubuque Herald.
A school-boy spelled ''sob,' and. ..xhen
asked to define it, bluudered out, at
means when q feller don't want TO ,eyy.
and it bursts out itself.' Another. de-
fined comma as 80 period with 4 tail"
"She was not smart, she was not faif, !,
But hearts with grief for her are swelin. !,
And empty stands her little chair .s;y
She died Of eatin' watermelin." ~,
A stout old woman got mad, TSstpr-
day, because photographer wouldn'te
let her fan herself while she had her,
| picture taken = Detroit Free Press.
That lunatic, Private, DaIsell, has O.
six-by nine paper Of his osfss to write
for now, and the Ohio newspapers are,
selling their extra waste baskets. - Wash
ington Chroaicle. -. - . : :.
Ann Eliza Young, wife If Brigham,
had a crowded house in Tltusyille -;
Well, she had o crowded house at home,
and that's the reason she left.-Wdsh.
ington Chronicle.
Young lady-"That piece Just playetl-
was by Wagner-wasn't it too lovely
for anything ?" Young gentleman.
"Yes; and. amt bis palace cars just
gay ?'-Al6any Journal. iel
There is something wrong In educa-s
ton when we give wometf nothing but
dress to think about, and then abuse
them because they think Of nothing
else. ,
AS soon as the Brooklyn scandal fs'
over, we must clean house. The weather,
| is warm for scrubbing and whitewasl-,
ing, but the work will have to be done.
I-Kingston Freeman. .
The country will be thrilled to hear
that the population Of Chicago increas-
ed seventy five thousand last year, iof
which number only forty-five per cent
is dogs.-Brooklyn Argus, 4qasiaa
Slang words are not always slang ~
Take the word 'jolly." In John Trapp'ss
Commentary on the Old and New,
'Cestamentsr" published in London 900
years ago, IS to be read, GAIL was Jolly:
quiet at Ephesus before St. Paul came
thither." - .7@ - f<hi53
Ten years from now Germany en-,
poets to be able to put into the fieldssss
trained army, of one million: six hundred
thousand men, This, for 8 country,
that has no Indian war on hand, will be
rather enterprising. ~ .,. e e. e.
/ A politician wishing to compliment
well-to do farmer, said, "Yoa must have
begun life earlyto accumulate. ,sech an.
estate as this p "Yes," replied .tKs.
farmer, 81 began life when xas . mere,
baby, 1gs frsaa ...f.',.o, =,
| An old veteran was. relating his, ex;
ploits to crowd of boys.a and mens,
toned being in Ave engagements; ;-S
l"That's nothing" broke in a little fefsl
low, "my sister Agnes has beenI enga.'
i get eleven tiwes"! =!
A spunly New Jersey girl got mad
at her lover the other day, and spike-
fully swallowing her engagement ring,
declaring at the same time that che was
prepared to dcfy as much as forty
stomach pumps. ''.a
! I wul knott dye Ia summer, and
leave the garden sass, the roast lamb
and buttermilk; wud not knott dye
in summer when everything is hot, and
leave the whisky jewlips; owe know,
ide ruther .Enot.. ~
i A district schoolmSstct In one of the
! upper counties of Michigan was asked
/ what algebra he preferred, and he re-
piled: "Oh, I ain't particular-most
any kind that will just peel the hide
when you, strike" f
A young man, who gets three or four
letters or notes from his inamorata
every. week, objects to the adjuration in
every one: "Speak as your heart
prompts you" He says it is getting
. tnonotonous, and won't catch worth :
cent. Last
A teacher in Nevada, after telling her
pupils that large fall was. a s'cateract.i -
Now" said she, "what is little wa
terfall % sKittyract," blurted out the
tow headed youngster who sat chewing
the'corner OF his primer on the front
T seat Ga I'D eygi
A German milkman, on the Bloom
ington road, rolls his pautaloons to his
: knees, dons heavy overcoa., rolls ul
his sle ewes, and, after finishing his { ii
ct with a plug hat, goes out to call OF
his girl: He considers this the height
: of fashion.-Ts"rs Haute Erprcss.
. "Mv spirits is crushed, Jane, crush
ed" sobbed Mrs Marrowfat to Mrs
Quoggs. "That lovely bowauets-yor
J, remember-which it was /, Marser,
Marrowfat. as sent tito Mrs. Splivin'l
e funeral. Well, the card got lost, an,
nobody knowed as who It come from
e And here her great anguish sloppet
r n =