The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1874-08-15

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matter Of my discourse. But Il Ia not IN,
paper, nor are those my sentences, nor Is /
a correct report Of what | said 1t Is
mere string Of hints hastily made by Al
: nnpractised writer rs helps to his memory
IN representing to Tilton how ] felt to
0 wards his family. II more than this b,
a claimed, ifit be set forth as in any prope
sense as my letter, then | disOwn il ant
denounce It, Some Of its sentences, par
ticularly that in which am mads TO say
that l had obtained Mrs. Tilton's forgive
ness. never could have said, even Il
substance, had not obtained nor asket
any foTgi Veneas from her, and nobody pre-
tended that | had done 90. Neither conlt
ever have said that humbled myself be-
fore Mrs. Tilton as before God, except II
a sense that 10 both God and to the man
had deeply injured, l humbled myself
az l certainly did. But il Is useless to an
alyze paper prepared as this was. Thu
remainder Of my plain statement concern
ing II will be It's best comment Thh
document was written upon three separate
half sheets Of large letter paper. Amer II
was finished Moulton asked me iftI would
sign ii. ] said no, II was not my letter
he replied thatit would have more weight
II would in some way indicate that he
was authorized 10 explain my sentiments.
took my pen, and some distance below
the writing and upon the lower margin, ]
indicated that ! committed the document
IN trust OF Moulton, and signed the line
thus written by me. A few words more as
to its further fate: Mr. Moulton, Of his
own accord, said that after using it, he
would, in two or three days, bring the
memorandum back to me. and he caution
ed me about disclosing in any wav that
there was difficulty between Mr.. filton
and me, as itwould be injurious to Tilton
TO have it known that l had quarrelled
with him as well az to me 10 have rumors
set anoat. i did not trouble myself
about it till more than a year anerward.
When Tilton began to write up his case
and was looking up documents, I wonder.
ed what was in the old memorandum and
desired to see twas far greater, certainly; 80
one day / suddenly asked Moulton for ihat
memorandum, and said, 'rYou promised to
return II TO me" He seemed confused for
a moment and said, "Did IP Certain.
ly,"' l answered. He replied that the
paper had been destroyed. On my put
ting the question again he said, "That
paper was burnt up long ago." and during
the next two years, in various conyersa-
tons, Of his own accord he spoke Of il as
destroyed. ! had never asked for nor au-
thorized the destruction Of this paper, but
was not allowed to know that the docu.
ment was in existence till distinguished
editor in New York, within a few weeks
past assured me that Moulton had shown
hun the original and that he had examined
my signature to be sure Of is genuineness.
know that there was copy of it since
this statement was in preparation. While
l rejected this memorandum as my work
or an inaccurate condensation Of my
statement, it does undoubtedly correctly
represent that l was in profound sorrow
and that / blamed myself with great SC.
verify for the disasters Of the Tilt0n fami-
ly. l had not then the light that now
have. There was much then that weighed
heavily upon my heart and conscience
which now weighs only on my heart. II
have not the light which analyses and dis.
semlnates things by one blow. There
opened before me revelation full Of an
guish, an organized family whose inmates
had been my friends greatly beloved, the
husband ruined in worldly prospects, the
household crumbling to pieces, the woman
by long sickness and suffering either cor
rupted to deceit, as her husband alleged,
or so broken in mind as 10 be irresponsi.
Bile, and either way, it was her enthusiasm
for her pastor, as l was made to believe,
that was the germ and beginning of the
trouble. 1t was for me to have forestalled
and prevented that mischief. My age
and experience in the world should have
put, Inc more on my guard. l could not
at that time tell what was true and what
was not true OF all the considerations
urged upon me by Tilton and Moulton.
There was gulf before me in which lay
those who had been my warm friends,
and they alleged that I had helped to
plunge them therein. That seemed
enough to Fill my soul with sorrow and an.
guish. No mother who has lost a child
but will understand the wild self-accusa.
ton that grief produced against all rea.
son, blaming herself for things she did do
and for what she neglected 10 do, and
charging upon herself, her neglect or her
heartlessness, the death Of her child,
while ordinarily every one knows she had
worn herself out with her assiduities.
Soon after this met Tilton at Moul-
toms house. Either Moulton was sick or
was very late in rising, for he was in bed.
The su6ject.o my feelings and conduct to-
ward Tilton was introduced. 1 made a
statement Of the motives under which I
had acted in counselling Bowen, of my
feelings in regard TO Tilton's family, dis
claiming with horror the thought Of
wrong and expressing desire to do what
ever lay in human power to remedy any
evil I had oCcasioned and to reunite his
family. Tilton was silent and sullen, He
played the part of an injured man; but
Moulton said 10 Tilton with intense EN-.
phasis: "ThAt is all that gentleman can
say, and you ought to accept it as IN hon
orable basis of reconciliation" This be
repeated two or three times, and Tilton's
countenance cheered up under Moulton's
strong talk. We shook hands and parted
in a friendly way. Not long afterwards
Tilton asked me TO his house and said that
he should be glad to have good old times
renewed. don't remember whether I
ever took meal after that under his roof,
but l certainly was invited by him to re-
new my visits as formerly. never re.
sumed my intimacy with the family, but
once or twice went there soon after my
reconciliation with Tilton, and at his re-
quest. l particularly remember a scene
which took place atihis house, when he
talked about his wife and me in very
gracious mood. He began by mourning
his sorrows; he was very desolate; the
future seemed quite dark. After impress
ing US with his great patience, he grew
generous, praised me to his wife, saying
that I had taken upon myself all the
i blame of mast trouhles and had honnrobl.,