Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-02-05


enough to accumulate considerable of this
worlds goods, desired, as all loyal subjects
should, to pay taxes on the same. 1t being a
new business to him, he did not know there
was proper officer for receiving the tax, and
concluded all that was necessary was to find
man with white skin.
Consequently he hailed the first man he
met with, "Say, boss, want to pay my tax ;
mus I glib it to you %
On being told it would be received by the
comprehending white gentleman, the negro
gave him S25, and asked if that was enough.
81 suppose it is" said the white man.
Boss, GIN me showin' for dat" said the
negro.
Again the wits of the white man were at
work, and he soon handed the negro slip Of
paper with the inscription:
".As Moses lifted the serpent out of the
wilderness, likewise have lifted s2o out of
this d-n negro's pocket"
Not long after this the negro met the tax
collector proper.
"Doue paid it, boss, and here's de 'ceipt, at
the same time handing the piece of paper to
the officer.
He read GAS Moses lifted the serpent out
of the wilderness, likewise have I lifted s25
out of this d-n negro's pocket"
Hold on, boss, you read 'um wrong" ejac-
ulated the astonshed darkey, as he snatched
the paper and carried it to another man, who
began to read, GAS Moses lifted" Here he
was interrupted by the negro, who exclaimed ::
"Look-a-yar; jest GIN me dat paper, I'm
gwne to lift dat white man out of his boots,
fore de Lord il"
With this he left, and, not having been
heard from since, it is supposed he is still
looking for the man to whom he paid his tax.
RELIGION A FREE PAss.-Among the jokes
of the season is the following: Two volatile
young ladies being told with considerable
irony that certain religious (?) railroad con-
ductor passed all persons belonging to the
Methodist Church, free, over his road, deter
mined to experiment upon him, and, with this
idea, improved an early opportunity of riding
on his train The car door opens Conduc-
tor enters. "Tickets, tickets gentlemen"
and, constantly repeating the call, the "holy"
man soon reaches the centre of the car
where the young damsels have disposed them
selves. "Tickets, miss, tickets" No reply
is made, and no tickets proffered. Impatient
ly extending his hand for several minutes, of
which not the slightest notice is taken, he
again demands in tones so loud that every eye
is turned toward the interesting trio: "Come,
be lively! no time to lose! your tickets y
At this, one of the young ladies' leaning with
serious face toward the irate conductor, re-
piled in voice distinctly heard throughout
the car: ''Sir, my friend and myself are both
members of the Methodist Church, and have
been told that all persons belonging to that
church ride free over your road is it not
SOP At this absurd question an audible
smile passed through the car, in which the
conductor (though at first too angry to speak,
finally thought it less awkward to join.
Therefore, seeing it his best policy to pass the
matter over as joke, he gravey responded,
"Well, if you haven't got any money, either
of you, suppose l will have to pass you,
church or no church, " and with this pacific re-
ply he passed himself quickly from the car,
leaving the two hard members" amid con-
siderable merriment in the rear.
HEAD Us ORA correspondent tells of a
country clerk in rural town, who had pet
calf which he was training up in the ways
or the OK tne call Walkeu afOullu very PedCe-
ably under one end of the yoke while Mr..
Clerk held up the other, but in an unfortunate
moment the man conceived the idea of putting
his own neck in the yoke, to let the calf see
how it would seem to work with partner.
This frightend mister calf and elevating his
tail and his voice he struck a " dead run" for
the village. Clerk went along, with his head
down and his plug hat in his hand, straining
every nerve to keep up, and crying out at the
top of his voice, "IIcre we come, dang our
fool souls, head us somebody"
Bay Flcas havea special fancy for women,
small children and dogs. Fleas much dislike
the smell of tobacco and whisky, and hence
seldom trouble man. In their tastes they
are much unlike the Indian. TO capture and
execute flea confers more happiness upon a
representative of the female sex than wearing
new bonnet in crowd for the same length
Of time.
sey~ A smart little boy in New Orleans was
reproved by his mother for telling lie tie
insisted it was only fun, but his pious mother
told him he must ask Divine pardon. 80,
Lord forgive me- wouldn't have said 1t,