The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1874-07-01

A few days ago the Good Templars
of Savannah, Georgia, had picnic at
beach in the vicinity of that city, the
ground being reached by a somewhat
extended trip on a steamer. Among
the provisions" were four casks of
iced water, upon which the excursion
lists relied for the quenehing of their
thirst, the only beverages allowed be-
ing, as matter of course, aqua ptua
and the soothing, but unexhilarating
lemonade. AT length suspicious edor
was noticed to emanate from the cups,
goblets and other articles from which
the thirsty Templars quaffed, and even
tualy it was decided that the bev.
erages they were indulging in had
what is vulgarly called "a stick" in
them. In factsome sly one had doc.
tored the whole supply with "corn
juice" and the temperance band had
all violated their pledges, innocently,
to be sure, but still undeniably. The
worst of it was that no other water
could be obtained, and that unfortun-
ate crowd were obliged all day either
to drink whiskey with their water, or
drink salt water, or, declining either,
to parch with thirst. And SO the poi.
son circulated as sparingly as possible
all day, and those Good Templars
wait to know whether it is necessary
for them all to be reobligated on ac-
count of their accidentally fractured
pledges.
Thirsty Customer Barkeeper,
what will five gallons and a gill of
your best whisky cost
Mr.. B.-Thirty dollars and twenty
five cents.
I. C.-Cheap enough. I'll take it.
Demjohn is handed down; T. G..
takes nip, smacks his lips and in
forms Mr.. B. that on the whole he
thinks he will not keep the balance,
and suggests that Mr.. B. shall buy it
back. Mr.. B. always ready for bar.
gain, offers the S3010 for it, which of.
fer I. G. accepts, paying the 10 cents
difference. A ten gallon transaction,
and only 10 cents changing hands. OF
course, the law forbidding the sale of
liquor, save in large quantities, was
not evaded.
Mr.. Agustus Lenord, of Western
Missouri was fond of fun. He dis
guised himself in war paint and other
fxings of an Indian and approached
the cabin of one of his neighbors The
countenance Of the corpse bore the
look of anticipated amusement as
plainly as in life.
A band of crusaders, in San Fran
cisco, while standing on the sidewalk,
outside saloon, broke through and
fell distance of ten feet into the mud
below. They were not hurt, but, after
extricating themselves, the meeting adj
journed abruptly.
An ambitious young lady was talk
ing about her favorite authors, when a
literary chap asked her if she liked
Lamb. With look of inefiable dis
gust, she answered that she cared very
little about what she ate, compared
with knowledge.
Abiding to the fact that three
steamers have been fatally weakened
by additions to their length, the Chris.
tian Register says MANY fine sermons
have been ruined the same way"
G!aziers are the only persons who
take pleasure in the thought that thi,
IS world of pane.
The man who tried to light his pipt
with billiard match said he did it ou
of cue-riosity.
The sentinel who did not sleep oil
his watch has left it at the pawnbro
ker's.
The Temperance movement OH Lon
Island is entirely surrounded by water