Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1874-07-09
BREVITIES.
OREGON never had breach of prom


look well, but give little air.
THE greatest truths are the simplest;
and so are the greatest men.
ECONOMY is a very good thing parsi-
mony is economy run to seed.
MExIcANs appear to like Texas, for
they take considerable stock in it.
PROF. TYNDALL says a man can't
breathe after ascending over 25,50O feet
THE woman who couldn't say boo to a
goose is now trying it on a gander. Quite
right.
AS usual, the inevitable fly is said to
be committing excuses in chewing Nir-
ginia tobacco.
VIRGINIA CITY, New, is beginning to
arrest it's citizens for violating the Com
pulsory Education law.
NORTH CAROIINIANs tempt immigra-
ton by the assurance that home in the
pine woods is a sure cure for consump-
ton.
THE latest sensation is balloon race
that will soon occur at Reading, Pa, be-
tween the aeronauts Phillippi, Donaldson
and Shearer.
If women would spend less time in
making ruff1es and tucks and more in
making fiower-beds, they would look
handsomer.
IT seems that female suffrage has not
entirely banished matrimonial infelicity
in Wyoming. Six divorce suits are pend
ing at Cheyenne.
FIFTEEN years ago Washington gen
tleman scratched his name on a gold
dollar and sent it on its travels. He has
never seen it since.
THE First Congregational Church of
Lexington, Mass, is still using a Bible
which was presented to the parish by
John Hancock in 1898.
THE flower charity, one of the most
beautiful and graceful charities of the
season, is meeting with widespread sup
port and encouragement.
A CONNECTICUT Coroner's jury naturally
decided that a suicide must, to all in
tents and purposes, have lost his head
when he neatly severed it from his body.
MONTREAL merchants are kicking
against the duty on tea. Another revo-
luton? If so, we can lend several thou
sand Indians to throw the tea overheard.
A VERMONT man, whose name is Bugg,
has been confined to his bed nine years.
Should think his wife would try some of
the patent eXterminatOrs ON such bed
Bugg.
THE potato-bug is playing prominent
part down South. What the overflow
has failed to destroy, these energetic lit
tie fellows are sweeping from the face of
the earth.
APRosPECTIvE mother-in-law up in Knox
| County, KY, joined issue with a young
man who declined to fulfill his marriage
| engagement with her daughter. When
she got through with him there was no
longer any breeches of promise.
THE Women's Social Education Socie-
ty of New York city has adopted pc
| tition to Congress that the "Conscience
Fund" amounting to about 100000 be
! devoted to the establishment in Wash
! ington of reform school for girls.
| OLD PROBABILITIES is unusually pig
| headed this year, sending rain where it is
not wanted and Withholding it where it is
thought to be needed. Not long since
there was an uninterrupted rain for four
teen days on the Atlantic Ocean.
SEVERAL persons were recently made
| i'll in Cleveland, Ohio, byice-cream which
they had eaten, and one of the " theories"
| is that the milk was exposed to a dense
| poisonous fog, when set for the cream to
| rise, and absorbed the foul vapors of the
| fog
| BLISS GODDARD, of Londonderry, Vt,
whose $4,000 of United States bonds were
| burned in the tea-kettle in which he had
placed them for safety, during the recent
| burning of his house, has had the whole
amount restored to him by the Treasury
| Department.
| NUMERICALLY the male sex is the
| stronger in Japan by about 100000, and
! it is to be hoped by every one who takes
stock in civilization that the much
| squelched and altogetherig ignored father
in-law receives proper recognition by the
| japanese ladies.
THERE is black-eyed young lady in
Danbury whose melting orbs three years
| ago were celestial blue. Her tresses have
| likewise undergone a change from au-
burn then to raven now. These singular
| transformations have all been due to
severe attack of the measles, which neces-
STATED the shaving off of all her hair.
| CRACKER DEssERT.-ChOose whole soda
| crackers, and lay each upon separate
small plate. Pour upon it enough boil
| ing water to soak it well, and leave none
upon the plate; cover with a dressing of
| good, sweetened cream with a spoonful
| of jelly in the center, if you choose, or
dip upon it a portion of nice fruit,
| canned stewed or fresh, as is convenient.
A CORRESPONDENT writes to the Scie71-
! tifc american that the worst toothache or
neuralgia coming from the teeth may be
| speedily and delightfully."- ended by the
| application of small bit of clean cot
ton saturated in strong solution of am
mOnia to the defective tooth. Sometimes
the late sufferer is prompted to moment
airy nervous laughter by the application,
but the pain has disappeared.
A STRANGE robbery was recently COM
mitted at Louisville, Ky. A young lady
who had an unusually fine head of hair,
which she wore in two braids, awakening
during the night with the idea that some
thing was wrong, arose and examined the
| door, and finding it was locked was about
retiring again, when she perceived that
one of her long braids had been cut off
! close to her head. The thief had entered
through an open window, but left no trace
to aid in his recognition.
BAKED APPLE DUMPLINGs.- out
some dough thicker than pie-crust, and
| inclose a handful of sliced ripe apples
well covered with sugar and butter.
| Bring the edges together as in any other
| dumplings. When as many are made as
are desired, place them side by side in
pudding pan, spread butter and sugar
over them and pour boiling water to about
half cover the dumplings. Put them in
the stove and cook moderately fast until
| thew are nicely Drowned The butter