The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-05-02
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Josh Billings Bill On Dispapsbs.Sa -.


~ Josh Billings on Dispapsbs.sa - 80,
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Dear Baker: I'hase2bsen a utsksiasbT
dispeptic for'27 years and four ormhontha, 'sa;
it would have been munni insniipdskesaes,
if had becneborh! without anya sssuussT
muck "a snrlis1 as esbi8 lid stsr,a. s,sav,
have prayed upwardd ofeioaa theBs 4Va
81 sand times To- been the insidea like sp
ors'rich Or trave!ling ,eolportes.i, rt.t
4 have seen travelling scqlp9rtass Ehe, ,.S
could eat ~, much az a goose.
have seen goose eat till ssshoy
couldn't stand VI, ranyo moro, and tbep =
sit down aud eat sum, and then lay down -
and eat sum- and then roll over ada }sstA
sum more. o. % s'SEoS To9 iGGaias eaa
hive tried lising ',otfH on filtered wsatSr -
aud going barcfoot for dispepshe, aadA
chat didn't hit the spot. c& iiIV 'isaise1oD
have soaked ae.water cure establiskadD
men's until was SO Timber that kouldgaM
not git myself backngain inside cofniA
Bal Twin apparel.axest ssT ayEs ssdassv
bought saddle .hossonce ;whosmaB: ~,
got up expressly to kure dispepshy+=.ha;aa,
was warranted to kare the dispepshy Ing
30 days orkill the h9ss, ~ "a q vfts 4.g,
llewas warranted to trot ha1der ,thand,s
trip hammer, pull wusser on biz, .
stumble safer down hill than emmy other
| hDss an tho foof ot,,11 "f'fNsSss
rode the hoss until iwaz all over Q
jelly, then sold him bride and saddle
and all for sixty eight dollers, and gos
sued by the purchaser, ana had to pay
him ninety dollars and sum sum seSnts aSitts dana az
ges, bekauze the hess had the sNimshy, 'ift
a disease knu nothing about. a's 80 Sai
The hoss and flxingsa kost me 4aO tos
lers gold. afths s@sseas'sa' as5 3 u aegs
ko ontracteds for eleven koras cea eaI
hickory wood, kross grained, and as fali: ~
of wrinkles az an cid cows horn ana
saw ed away three months on il, and the s
pile seemed to grow bigger every day.
Tfnally gave away the saw, and what
~ there was left tosavc life, and
:. sat saraged u square victim
to the esa at.asl s. t..ss 8:
] have lived d side, ina gafA
bnolad in the sailing food until twas aS
e!l,pickled as a number one salt mack
crcl. ''ts, =
] have lwclt at Saratoga, and taken
:, the water Ii Ike mill race and still Had
. e - a.
The dispepshec. - .'aF 1slsaa
Ihavc walked two miles beforaas break
fast and, than EFT a slice ov dri tosass and ~
7haff the yelk ov pullet's es; ana fait 'a
pail the time az weak as kitten thss -
had jnst come outoe arfitE s1sveIo1 a
4, r have alaid' down moro than ,svUis
thousand times, and rolled over. cones bas
'hidate all nightsIongg, sand gstapih thsao
'hcrning like corpse, aud there dian'tss
a nothing scsuiFtoa mc'dnn8 ahoresio
: particularl 'sho1, D sdi 80 ari3GiL aiyiaO
.lE ishave'read whole libsrys on thastana.g
i n.dk and diver .owheniii.go i.gota:thfusiss
knu CRATE deal less what wa. ther thss1
d tcr with 4nea than, wIhepsi begun. sass, A
4 4 Ihaye, drank whiskee with roots in e.;
4 euuff7to, carry oa, seunyTb bridge @. Jaw,
mill h'sm insthescountrY! ai so;,.pis st6,
!. Iohaye worked oaaa farm for ni yittels,
/ nhdrboafd, ,,apd dietods on fridep pork anaas
ri bred until i, was thin rs the sernen
ov, q seyen days baptiss pFrlachefr!h 90 :
4 I,have dun all these things and Gea /
4 thousand other things lust as ridikifa.a
and have got the old dispepshss syss,,a
t just az natraI and as 'thik az the YppimplssH
on four year old goose. 's'i'q@fq aa' fo
!, 'a1f yd sic a'gobaihold cvathes didpep
'hee o"tesyau ktfat never loosa itaentirs,
i lgs ii Will 'ehmgaroddf ohcei in4a sznilas
Ikea hosts and If it don'tskareogyu so
nn'oh1as iSadidY once, land eaakeui you
tI'idk Saiafe going etoadias,to morrow,
it Wil maksJou feel7just as sorry .tged.
Yours, JOSH BILLINGS
'nl L@4- a.&a..s, ssszssvsls-se~-4E -
h'Thd Sbasest smen have the lowest astll
nidtc Of women! ssaisgs siDs basstissai
Straw berries are ID New Yofkynisrkos
at 81 quart 0ton ~ 20 ssgsosd issYe3
| a - 4. F..