The Lake County star. [volume] (Chase, Mich.) 1873-current, 1874-02-19
FACTS AND FANCIEs.

The ice-cutter still say: "Too
thin" rtk
What would this world be with
out woman? A perfect blank-like
sheet Of paper-not even ruled.
1T Is said that before states were
invented people multiplied on the
face Of the earth. tlt = hN
-"Wake up here and pay for your
lodging, !" said q deacon, as he nudged
a sleepy stranger with'a contribution
box: fE
"A little boy, disputing with his
sister recently, exclaimed: "Tis true,
for ma says so; and II ma says 80, 1t
is 80, II It ain'tso." III
Why Is young lady just gradu-
ated from the female seminary like
building committee? Because she Is
ready to receive proposals.
--.HDon'ta Quaker ever take off his
hat to any one, mamma~ "NO, my
dear.n aft he don't take off his hat to
a barber, how does he have his hair
cut?" ~
AT late conference session a
clergyman gave q reason why the
Baptist Church Is like beavers hut;
s'There Is only one entrance to 1t, and
that Is under water.n ~
If q shoemaker, in drawing to
his end, wakes cold, and gives up his
awl before pegging out, what will be-
come of his sole II he Is not able to
breathe his last? That Is the ques-
toni
An effort Is being made to have
the Ohio Legislature pass law max
ing wild game property and making
It q penal offence for any man to go
upon the lands of another for the pur-
pose Of killing such game. E
"A Washington letter calls atten-
ton to the fact that not dollar has
even been missing from the depart
ment Of the Comptroller of the cur
rency, where ladies exclusively are
employed as clerks.
Fourteen million and thirty.nine
thousand dollars Of the twenty mil
lion loan bonds of 1853 have been re-
deemed and exchanged. Most of
these bonds have been exchanged for
the new five per-cents.
An English Judge has decided
that thread manufacturers who mark
1900 yards on spO0ls having but l2O
yards, are guilty OF no offense, if they
ship the spOOls to America. Can't we
ship them another load of wooden
hams and nutmegs?
The friends of a wit expressing
some surprise that, with his age and
fondness for the bottle, he should
have thought 1t worth while to mar
ry. "A wife Is necessary" he said;
"they begin to say of me that 1 drank
too much for single man."
AT Wabash, Indiana, the other
day, city councilman traded an ar
tesian we'll, 100 feet deep, for a
steam fire engine. The trade was de-
clared of, however, when the agent
demanded that the well should be de-
livered on board the cars boxed for
shipment.
The Supreme Court of Illinois, in
an appeal case from Chicago, has de-
cided that the ordinance prohibiting
the sale of liquor on Sunday is con-
stitutional, and that the Mayor, un-
der the charter, has right to revoke
any licence given If the saloon is dis
orderly.
The old armchair used by Horace
Greeley for 80 many years in the
Tribune Office, seated in which he
wrote his last published utterances,
Is now In possession of Mr.. Thomas
N. Rocker, of Brooklyn, Secretary
of the Tribune Association. The
chair Is battered with age and hard
service.
"A Minnesota court has decided
when man is illegally drunk" Said
the Judge: at is not necessary that
q man should be wallowing in ditch,
or humping his head against your
posts, that you may know him to he
drunk, but whenever he begins to tell
the same thing over twice, then he's
drunk"
"A colored servant sweeping out a
bachelors room, found sixpence on
the carpet, which he carried to the
owner. "YOu may keep it for your
honesty" said he. A short time af-
ter he missed his gold pencil-case, and
inquired of his servant II he had seen
it. "YeS, SIR" was the reply. "And
what have you done with It 2" "Kept
1t for my honesty, SIR"
The Troy Times says: Recently,
ut q church fair on Ida Hill, large
and frosted cake was offered to the
person who should guess nearest to
the correct weight, at ten cents a
guess. The pastor of the church
urged young lawyer to invest a
dime. The practitioner replied: 'Tll
play you a game OF euchre to see who
gets the cake, but don't understand
the other game"
"A kind-hearted wife once waited
on a physician to request him to pre-
scribe for her husbands eyes, which
were sore. "Let him wash them ev-
cry morning with brandy" said the
doctor. A few weeks after the doctor
CHANGED to meet the wife. swell,
has your husband followed my adj
viceT "He has done everything In
his power to do II, doctor, but he new
or could get the brandy higher than
his mouth"
"A new-made widow went lately
to life insurance Office to receive the
life, which had providentIy been
made payable to her. The president
thought It only proper to condole
with her on her bereavement. II am
truly sorry, madam, to hear Of your
loss.O CHATS always the way with
you men. You are always sorry
when q poor woman gets a chance to
make little money" W
CHARITY. l-ieff