davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01
Business Locals.
DWSIIIVNS INJCTISs
AglIe (ONNUerOr-NoQ uin

AgUe COnQHerOr-No Quinine Ar
seEic or Poisons.-This is strong language,
as Physicians and Chemists have for years
tried to compound a preparation that would
entirely cure Fever and Ague without the
use of strong medicines such as Quinine
Arsenic and other posons injurious to the
system. There is no case of Fever and
Ague, Internittent or Bilious Feyers, Con
gestive Chills, Night Sweats, Liver Com
plants &c, that this remedy will not
cure at once and permanently. 1t purities
the Blood, Liver, Spleens, and all secretory
organs so ettcctually that the Chills will not
return during the season even when persons
have had them for years. Sold by G.. A.
WINGERT.
SaraIfnes. - Tic American Sar(line
Company's Bonecss Sarlines are much
better, and less than half the cost of import
ed Sardinss.
Ifyou wish Il good Suit and a nice fit, 90
to ALEX. kRATZ' and select from the finest
and cheapest stock ever brought to this
placc-at ID. THOMAS old stand.
}. w. BERRY, Agent.
$500 will buy you nice Spring Cass.
Suit at b. STEKN's
No Improvements on the "Ironsidcs."
Wanted I'll, public TO know that the
purcst Wines and Liquors. by the gallon or
otherwise, is sold at b. STERN's Liquor
Store. Old stock Whiskcy, . years old,)
Brandics, Gins and Rum, always on hand
Attenti0n.-Dont forget to examine
my Clothing before purchasing anywhere
else. B. STERN.
If you want the genuine London
Brown Stout, Ale, fine WHISTLES, Brandes
and Wines, go to Is. SrHHSs Liquor Store.
lfa cheap Stove is what YOU want
Try the 'Farmer;'
Ur if you want a cheaper one
Take the ''Charmcr.'
Both of which are choice, neat and fine,
And can be found at 20.
All styles of fancy Bows, Ties, Scarfs,
Collars, Cuffs, &c, at d. THOMAS old stand
j. W. BERRY, Agent.
Wall Paper and EslinsIs.-R.
r. WASH, third building West of Post Office,
Clothing has been reduced Is per cent
at b. STERN's Clothing Store.
Getlthe bcst-the "Ironsidcs" Sat 49,
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

Pennsylvania Military Academy,
('HESTER, PA-(For boarders only.)-
" Session opens Wednesday, September
9th. Location healthful Grounds ample !;
Buildings commodious; Course of Studies
extensive. Thorough Instruction in Civil
and Mechanical Engineering, the Classics,
and English careful oversight ofthe morals
and manners of Cadets. For circulars apply
to w. H. Ravcnscraft, NJ. d., James Kane,
ESD, A. L. lIitchins, Esq, G. w. McCulloh,
Esq, patrons of the Academy i'll Frostburg,
or to Col Thco. Hyatt. july 1S-2m
Cumberland and Pennsylvania Railroad.
Two THROUGH PASSENGER TRAINS
EACH WAY.
COMMENCING MONDAY, JULY 81, "A
From Piedmont.
r EAVING at 600 and tits a, H., aud
L. arrive at CUMBERLAND at s ,25 a. m.
and 1875 p m.
From CumbcrIaHd,
Leaving at 900 n. M and $50 D. M, and az
rive at PIEDMONT at 10 a. n. and 5.45
p. m.
Tickets good for Twenty Trips between
any two Stations sold at Reduced Prices by
all Ticket Agents.
Trains run daily excepting Sundays, and
stop at all Stations.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

The Cecil County (Md) Whig
takes time by the scalp, and nomi-
mates POSTMASTER General Creswell
for next President.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

The republican nominating conven-
ton for this congressional district will
meet in Hagerstown on the tenth of
September.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

Workmen, while digging well at
New Haven, Ind, on Friday, struck
q vein of oil at the depth of eight feet.
The fluid is equal to the best coal oil.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

There is hourishing pump manu-
factory at Charleston West Virginia. +,
on the Kanawha River, whence they
ship pumps by the carload to New
York, where the company have an Of
flee and warehouse. The vast forests
Of that region afford extraordinary IA
cilities for maaufactur ers of wooden
ware Coal and iron also abound in
that section of the State.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

Satisfactory reports come in from
South Yorkshire concerning the iron
trade, but the coal trade is troubled on
the vexed question of wages.
The iron trade on the Continent, es-
pecially in France and Belgium is
slowly improving. Prices are frmer,
and orders more numerous. In Lux
embourg, the prices of pig iron have
been raised.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

OF tho ,,,a,.corfil, otrenn,- firms
bo,, ne WIN tln;,. ,;oTrs concarn-
;nl l INV 4I' 5ro.,'n I fo. ,bo fo1l trodo
VIZ VIZ ;n Az orn fnI of enconraaoment
GIassrs J,,rc Rar,ov, & o. no firm,
aLnva. ajlndod r. claim That i ;s q
f'ras s,l r,tr;,,; w. a. ~ i
49, , n.t a." tha ;, , ,o6Itbs fharn
ba,.a hoon 'aLso1Itolv fower IN nrom
;nenoo tLon far ths same nnrio1 in
Tho avora',a Of wears + i furthnr
not;co,l,1S hat +bars has benn a varv
rsn,9rI,,LIa roI,lrtion in the ;ndobtod-
ness af III cIassrs and generally
t ,l, l,a oo,,ntrv The marc,n-
III, ;niaLtolrnss in fho connt,,- in
, '.,a u talGay * NOT 1oora HAN two
t ~ -if',' yba+ + v9-, At his t;ma last
,. -l-- .' "nJ ;nloo1 90 orrat hos loon
@ianIanov tav,rI l;ImIot;on thot
y - @,Nnn [as Loon . cansa Of q rest r;cf.
81 ' hns;,, ,' and h9mne,ad trada az
w. ,'',,['' No ,an+ of op,,l;3onaa IN tIo
a s-,> Of H." nt,v ~ tba sofatv Of
creC;t' ~
AZ nresent a}rhouoh q ouiet foelno
pefT"aes me general Market the Vol
u!ne OF trade is Almost a. lafSG as usu-
al al at lA's cum Pe1lo't o. 'ne r; year.
1ae wheat crop IN tAe Nhl'eo states
a2kinS an average IS peyona q ooup'
the largest VIVA "Alch the country
mas ever been. blessed, oeIn3 lulIy ten
peg cent. heavier than usual; N Nal D.
ma 2L2'!e cialms crop OF 4O,0Uo,ooO
busls<.So'S ortiz '3:t4 ,OOo,UGo' Inc corn
crop Is progressing hnely since the
4ate coplo2'' rams OatS, nay ana
some OF Tie root crops oil England are
reported to be short IN consequence OF
dronth, 50 $i!St mere Is every pros
2ect OF a contl4"c2 9oou export de-
mand Tor corn fruits promise to be
2nnnoan1; 1aEen ali IN aii' the pro
duets o. the sou are more than oFd'n-
arily plenttlui, and must contribute
largely toward an active faii trade
while the effect 6! agrlelllturai wealth
can Hot bug affect hA05t iaForabiy the
Commerce and general lndus,rles OF
A. -;n-a-o,.. -. u-oalo
M i" ti IeSay q ,o' a. "sd t"sSnat
'toi rir 800; ~ 4 94@s'' o"'et IN ' ;.,nnaa
~ ~ 0o"; i,'' ,'s1 a.a'Is orS ~ ~ ~,
[s an ,' that 1 va" "-os al r;rb+
as was his regular custom before the
miners entered for The days work.
He was accosted while on his way by
three strangers, who asked him for
work lie replied that he had full
force and did not need their services.
They then drew their revolvers and
fired nine shots at him. two of which
took effect in his ftsholder and side.
His cries and the reports Of the pistols
attracted the attention Of Robert
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

AN IMPORTANT RUMoR.-The Phila-
delphia Ledger says there are rumors
current that the different railroads in
tend to combine and do their own ex-
press business that is, carry the pack
ages and receive the full price them
selves, thus making the profit now
made by the Adams Express Com
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-08-01

We learn from the Bedford Daily
Gazette that the Pennsylvania Rail
road Company, have purchased a
branch OF the Cumberland and Penn
svlvania railroad, two and a half miles
long, from Kreighbaum' to State Line
This brings them that much nearer the
coal fields.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-01-20

And win you love me less now that
you find yourself deprived of the pleasure
of incessant toll in my behalfp" archly
asked the fair girl, as she cast look of
tenderness up into the face of her COM
panion.
Edward caught the lovely girl in his
arms, but his answer was drowned in the
loud din of long and hearty laugh which
at that moment burst forth from the lips of
the old captain.
One of the first acts of the gentle Lizzy,
after her marriage with Edward, was to
bestow upon Arabella a muniflcent gift,
meant, of course, as delicate token from
the younger to tho elder brother. Tim
othy received its benefit-he knew from
whence he came; and he lived to be wiser
and better man.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-01-20
The Greatest Discovery Of the Age

TNHERE are no diseases so debilitating in
Il their effects upon the constitution as the
above, and none more difficult to cure by the
usual modes of practice. The Fever and Ague
Powders will effect cure in cases of the long
est standing, as we'll as prove a preventive in
the forming stages of disease. Being purely
Vegetable, they act with certainty on the dis
ease, totally eradlcating it from the system,
and preventing return at any future period.
Why waste your money and health in trying
every medicine you hear of, when Thompson's
Fever and Ague Powders have never failed to
cure the Chills in any case.
REASONS WHY THEY ONLY SHOULD BE
USED:
Their Reputation Is Established. - Thousands
of testimonials have been received, showing
that these Powders have performed miracles in
curing cases of long standing, many of them
considered hopeless.
There is no Risk in Taking Them. = They
contain nothing injurious, and, therefore, cause
none of those lingering diseases SO often the re-
suit of the many nostrums of the day. Physi-
clans recommend them as far superior to Qui-
nine, or any other known remedy for they leave
the system in a healthy state, and the patient
beyond the probability of a relapse.
BEWARE OF COUNTERFEITS. = The
genuine are put up in square tin boxes, with
"Thompson's Fever and Ague Powders
stamped on the lid, and the signature of
" Thompson & Crawford" on the wrapper.-
No others can possibly be genuine.
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-01-20
NeaO Pe2asiO2a -L02O.

HNDER an act of Congress approved March 3,
" 1873 widows of officers who were killed. or
died OF disease contracted in the service are now
dren.
The guardian of minor child of soldier who
heretofore only received $500 per month pension
is now entitled to $40. per moth.
Soldiers who receive invalid pensions can now
have their pensions increased to any sum or rate
between IS. and Sl8. per month.
Soldiers who have lost their discharges can now
obtain duplicates.
Fathers and mothers who lost sons In the serV-
ice upon whom they were dependent for support,
can also obtain pensions.
The undeisigled having had over 10 years ex-
perience in the Claim agency business Will attend
promptly to claims under the above act
Call on or address
LEWIS POTTER,
Attorney for Claimants,
New Bloomfield,
20tf Perry Co., Pa
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-01-20
NeUer K0O1C11 to Fail!
THOMPsON's
FeCeT Dc A01te POWDERS
FOR THE

CURE OF CHILLs AND FE-
YER, DUMB AGUE, OR ANY FORM
OF INTERMITTENT FEVER
The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-01-20

This Liniment has earned for itself a reputa-
tion unequalled in the history of external ap-
plications. Thousands who now suffer from
Rheumatism, Neuralgia, &C., would find i'm
mediate relief from all their pain by using this
certain remedy. 1t is equally effectual in Cuts,
Burns, Scalds, Stiffness of the Neck, Sore
Throat, Swellings, Inhammations, Frost Bites,
Pains in the Side and Back, Bites of Spiders
or Stings of Insects. One rubbing will in all
cases give immediate relief, and a few applica-
tons complete cure. On account of its pow
erful penetrating properties it is beyond doubt,
the SUREST REMEDY for the most trouble
some diseases to which horses and cattle are
liable. 1t cures Scratches, Old and Fresh Cuts
and Sores, Chafes produced by collar or sad
die. Injuries caused by nails or splints enter
ing the flesh or hoofs, Bruises, sprains, Swee-
ney, Spawn, Thrush, and all diseases which
destroy the hoofs or bones of the feet. Fnll
directions accompany each bottle. Prepared
only
By Crawford & FObes,
141 Market Street,
9b1y PHILADELPHIA.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22
IN. WAY to Sing soprano in Choir.

Dear Miss-This is an important epoch
mic your life. The first thing To make II
rood ouiIe singer is 10 giggle little.
Pool up yoor hare in hurl papers every
Friday mite, soze to have il in good shape on
sunday, morning.
If your daddy is w!itCh, 700 ken ny some
store hare. Ii he is very wrltch, ny sum
more and build it upon yoor he'd: then get
a hy.priset buunot that runs up very ny at
the Inv part of it, and giithe milliner to plant
some by grown kind of artafishels on inc ny
est part oy the bunnot This will help you
to sing by, bckez Soprano is the hyest part.
Hwcn the toon is given out, don't pay AT
tcnshun to it, but ask the neerest young man
what it is, and then giggle
Giggle good eel
Hwhispcr to the CURL next to you, mat EN-
Jones, which sits on the third seat from the
! frunt on the left hand side, has her bunnot
trimmed with the same kuller she had last
ycer, and then poot your BOOK up 10 your
face and gigglc.
! Object 10 every toon mlcst THAR is a solo
into it for the sopranno
| Koff and hem a good ell before YOU begin
20 sing.
When VOC sing 4 solo, shake yoor he'd like
VOC was a irving 10 shake the artatishals OIL
yoor bunnot, and hwen 700 come to Il ny
| loon, brace Yourself back little, twist yoor
he'd TO / side and open yoor mouth the wild
est at the side, shct the iys at the same side
list a triphc and then poot in for deer life.
Hwen the preacher gets under hedway
with his precchin, rite Il noat onto the blank
/ lcef INTO the fore part ov yoor noat book.
That's what the blank leef was made for.
/ Git them to pass it TO SOMEBODY else, and
YOU watch them while they read it and then
gigglc. ,-
ii emmy buddy locks or latfs in the konger-
rygashun, and the preecher takes eny notis
oy it, that's a good chants for VOC to giggie
and you oft to a graid deel. The preecher
darsent sa emmy thing to 700, bekoz 700 are
in the quirc, and he kant run the meeting
hous both ends without the quire,
! If yo had DO beloar 700 went into the
quire, give him the mitteu-yoo OFT to hev
sumbuddy better now.
Choo handy and throw peanuts AL over the
florr They will be handy to step onto,
Doant torgit TO gigglc- Ro"tS Song VeS'F"-
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

4 lecturer on natural history was called
the other day to pay for live rabbit he had
in a basket in railway carriage, and which
the ticket collector said would be charged the
same as dog. The lecturer vainly explained
that he was going to use the RABBIT in illusra-
ton of a lecture he was about 10 give ins
provincial town; and, Indignantly taking a
small live tortoise from his pocket, said
You'll be telling me next that this is dog
and that | must pay for it also" The ticket
taker went for superior orders, and on his
return delivered this lecture in natural his.
tory: Cats is dogs, and rabbits is dogs; but
a tortoise Is a himself The professor had To
pay for the rabbit
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

\ COMPASSIONATE PAssENGER.-.iohn
Browning. popular conductor on the inGian-
polls and ST Louis, road, has the misfortune
ID wear a wooden leg, which, while not ac-
,ually causing lamencSs still neceSsltatcS a
.imping gait Recently, while John was on
ais train, compassionate passenger, noticing
MS movements. and suspecting that he was
suffering from 4 corn, asked him il such was
he case.
Yes said John; I've got corn anu a bad
ana. too, assure you
Well, sir can tell You how yoU can cure
Z. and al ,rItiing cost-not over ten cents,
aid the passenger.
Ia give ten hundred dollars TO have mine
ured. but its a hard case, and doubt " beth.
r- anybody can cure it, replied John.
The passenger insisted that 10 corn was
.syer 80 hard ~ The one which had been
planted on his foot, md he hat that one
cured
Was i, "a, hard Is that gne@ askcd John
raising up his wooden leg ANA pointing il to
he place on ii. foot where the corn was sup
.esed TO be.
The passenger fe,t, and replied that II was
But feel further up John said.
He pressed :he boot iur a iew minutes, and
hen. with look OF mingled disgust and sur
prise said:
.Pshaw. man, ,hat amt corn: that's a
lgBlon-'
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

John Paul who has had diversified eXpe-
ricnce with dogs, writes from his home to the
Trt6uac He mentions that he was once bit
ten on the ear by canine, since which time
he appears to have suffered much, not from
the bite but from Mrs. Paul. He says, she
begged that ! would send for the doctor at
once and have my ear cut off, declaring that
if | did not she should not have moments
peace. Arbitrarily, perhaps hrutally, | de
clined to crafty her. In consequence | have
not yet had the bliss Of knowing what it Is
to bound gayly through life with leather
ear. 1t may be that the experience is still
destined 10 be mine, however; for since this
mad-dog excitement reached its present
height, Mrs. Paul frequently asks me If feel
no symptoms. | cannot scratch the back OF
my head without her placing bucket OF
water before me 10 see if snow signs OF
boiling
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

THEN He WASN'T ArEAm.-A good story
is told Of the manner in which The English
volunteer artillery practice with an Arm
strong gun, by the London Figaro. Having
set upon Rye Beach 4 target a little larger
than a man, they stationed about twenty
yards away from il, in lateral direction, one
of their number known as Big Bob, TO warn
away the shrimpers The first few shots flew
wide of their mark, some OF them so Zero
ciously near to Bob that he got nervous, ana
was about to 30 away from there, when sud.
dcnly-spang! went a big ball through the
centre of the target Pm all right now said
Robert, calmly feeling for his pipe; they've
laid on another gunner, and the fool is firing
at me. I'll have good smoke
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

The Prcrttcai F0ym,r says: ID. W. Hers
tine informs us Of his success in sending
down Oa:s as a mulch for his strawberries.
1t seems to answer exactly, and is perhaps
less trouble and expense than any other At
command. He soUcd the oats broadcast all
over his strawberry patch about the 10Th OF
September Their growth is of course small
nj first. and does not interfere with the straw
berries When it has made larger growth
il is of course checked by severe trosis and
afterwards killed by the winter, when it falls
down over the plants, making a complete and
sufficient covering TIL spring, when the young
plants readily push through it,
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

\ young minister and his wife visited a
congregation where his father was previous
" the pastor. He preached on the Sabbath,
and after service, one of the venerable elders
apeaklng with the young ministers wife said
Your husband preached from the same
ext that his father had the last time he was
n that pulpit
Indeed replied the lady, i hope it Was
not the same sermon too
oh, no. said the good elder, his father was
. dreadful smart man
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

Most WELCOME For n short time after
The Disruption, an unkindly feeling existed
between the ministers Of the Established
Church and their protesting brethren. Sey-
aral free" parishioners of Backford, Perth
hire, waited on Mr. Clark, the Established
minister, and preferred the services of the
non Erastian sexton will you allow us
sir, said one of the deputation, TO dig oul
own graves Certainly gentlemen, said Mr.
Clark, you are most welcome; and the sooner
the better
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

At Saratoga, on the evening when the comet
first made its appearance, a young husband
rushed into the drawingroom for his cara
spose, seated comfortably on the sofa, receiv.
ing with mischievous delight the compli-
ments and the "homage" oftwO snowy-haired
Cubans, Mary, Mary, quick Come and
look at the comet calculated the husband
I'm engaged at present, she replied tranquil
". and will see It some other time But You
Gan't for it's going away soon he persisted
oh, John, don't bother me- the lady re-
~ponded, peevishly; as if we were never
coming to Saratoga again? can see it next
year, you goose y0uY Tableau.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

- Just as she was about to take the scat he
offered her in the street car, She said, snap.
pishly: If there were any gentlemen in the
ear they would not allow lady to go the
length of it before giving her seat Then
he brutal man slid quickly back to his seat
and quietly remarked: L think the ladies
IRE all seated This was followed by an audi.
Die smile from several male tyrants in the
car, and the lady(D, making frantic plunge
.or the hell-strap, was soon ushercd into the
street, temper and all.-Nc,c York WoH
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

BED BuGs.--A correspondent writes. AZ
ter fighting them eight years, | learned from
a Girl who had served As chambermaid in Il
large boarding house, that bugs could be en-
.lrely cxtcrminaied tor all time. | immc
diatrly followed her direc ions, which WAS
to take grease that was melted out of salt
pork. to mel; it, and 90 keep it melted Uhc
vessel can be kept in pan Of Goals, and to
put It with the feather end of a quill IN every
place where cuUld find bug. Il Is neccs
Sarv To src that the bed cords are entirely free
from the pests. and I Will warrant there will
be No more trouble. Il Is more than thirty
years since bug has been seen in my house.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

Pat was shovcling his cart load when the
boss" came along and told him to dump 1t
Down went the load cart and horse over the
embankment, while Pat comp!accnty re
marked: 'l's mighty convenient, but trying
70 the hnaSt
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

The other day au adipose citizen stgollcd
Up to couple of acquaiutances who were
talking on the corner, and one of them sa'
.utcd him WITH why you are growing big
ger every day. have heard of a man being
latter than two fools We'll, gress | could
outweigh both of YOU replied ole fatty
quietly, as he walked along.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

Would my little Ezra asked fond mother
IN Arbor I'LL, like to be q missionary, and
gopreach to the poor, suffering little heather !!
Tears-bright, pearly drops of ieeiing-glls
zen in little Ezra's eyes rs he murmured
Nav, ] wouldn't; but I'd like to be on the
perlce long enough TO put a tiE roof on tho
iummax that stuck shoemak wax on my
seat to-day. You hear meg
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

THE WHOLE LOAF.-A gentleman relates
Some wears since | boarded at a hotel, the
proprietor of which was newly married
man. The maiden name of his spouse was
Crumb Immediately after marriage, and
when the hotel business commenced, old lady
Crumb, her daughter Peggy, and her two
sons, John and Ike. regularly demlciled
themselves within the hospltable walls of the
inn. The landlord was a good naturcd, easy
gong sort oC fellow, not quite as smart as
some folks; but enc day he got off the FOL
lowing:
Addressing me, he said, Look s-hyar, sam
I'll tell you Just how il is: When got mar
ried thought was getting Cfnmb, but
I'll be hanged if ! don't believe got Tho
hull loaf
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-22

THryKING or THE NElGHBoHs.-Las week
at Il little social gathering, a duet
was being performed by two young ladies, to
the apparent delight of all the assembled
guests. The two cXccutants were doing their
utmost to drown one another, and with such
good effect that one could scarcely have heard
The report Of cannon fifty yards oil. Eve.
rybody was radiant with the exception OF
one individual, TO whom, a. length, friend
addressed himself:
MY dear fellow, what makes You so pen
sivcN
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