Martinsburg weekly independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1873-1875, 1874-12-26
SKUNKEE.
By John sMIT."

Eds. Independent:
During collecting tour through
some of the mountainous counties
of West Virginia, last Summer, I
was one day riding along lonely
by-path that intersected a quiet
little valley, when my attention
was suddenly arrested by some
odd antics, cut by tow headed
youngster, who once in while
halted in his approach to "pat
yuba," at the same time cutting
the tallest kinds of pigeon wings
After time, perceiving me, he
seated himself on a stump by the
roadside, and tossing the remains
of an old army cap high in the air,
he sent up shout after shout of
childish, gleeful laughter, causing
the dell to fairly ring with the
music. Stopping my jaded mare
beneath the shade of a beautiful
sugar tree, inquired the source of
his mirth. He only replied by
opening his fist, displaying hand
full of nickels. Plying him with
questions, / obtained the following
brief history of the cause of his
happiness, and will try to give it
In his own words: You see, stran-
ger, he commenced, darned old
skunk cotched hisself in Bulbs
that's brother Bill-possum trap,
and Bub said as how it smelled
stronger than ingons, and that he
didn't want nuthin to do with the
cuss nor the trap nither, and 80 /
got John Bly, to help, and we
Shock the critter with his nasty
breath and all outer the trap into
a sack an fetched him down to a
place called Their court house, where
they pays rewards for varmints
skulps. Well, we took lack Pc
tiers, along, John and me did, and
when we fetched up to little
place up some steps, we met a
long-legged Teller wat said he was
clerk, am he told us to skedaddle,
or some other high-complusion
word taken from the erik Arith-
metic that Bub and the skule
marm's alters talking over, but
we couldn't think o. doing what
that slim chaps big word said, so
we holds a polly-wolly-tnat's a
French word, stranger, Bub says
so-and lack says lets take this yer
unimile in the big room where we
seed so many was alters going, so
we went there and seed the room
was full Nv people, and little fell
Ter was settin high up, behind a
pailing fence, and that chap what
called us the big wort cum in and
set down behind another palm
fence, an then some Teller COM
menced hollerin like our old black
bull when he's caterwampas, and
while everybody was looking the
other way, lack looked the bag
and kim over the benches to were
| the little man sot, when some fell
Ter eotched hold Oh lack and said
that same big word wot the clerk
had said in erik, but the little
man behind the fence axed lack
wot he wonted, and when he told
him, he axed wot kind of sculp we
wanted bounty for, but lack
didn't say nothin', but just dump
ed skunkee right out there upon
the table, where some rich bugs
was settin' around. Pretty soon
thare was some tall kind of cussin'
goin' on as that there animile went
hoppin' round, and them fellers
wot had store close on was CHM
ing up high as ever they could
after little some chap said to Zach
somebody take that darned rotten
thing out, and I'll give you a
quartern lack he followed for us
to help, an when we cum, he wis.
pers, only make-out you'll catch
skunkee, and We'll get more grist
for independence day, arter a lit
tie the fellows behind the fence
commenced getting out thar shin
ers, to pay us for taking that thar
innocent little animile wot Buh
and skulemarm calls quadrooped
away. Well stranger we gathered
up marin two dollers an all these
sinners IS wots my share, and jump
ing up as he concluded, he entered
the woods, singing, Hail Column
bia," as merry as cricket.