The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-09-24
A Stage Rumpus.

Dom Piatt, writing in the Capital of
a stage ride, says:
OF late the stage companies, to escape
the well-known robbery by drivers,
have put the patent box in each stage.
The drivers give change, but are not
permitted to take the fare. We were
seated, when stout gentleman entered
and crowded into corner near the
door, for the stage was crowded. The
newcomer took from his vest pocked q
ragged note and passed it along the
line. The man nearest the box was q
clergyman. He lifted the note and
dropped it in the box.
Halloo," cried the indignant adj
pose near the door, "what'd you do
that for it's quarter
"I'm very sorry, I'm sure" stam-
mered the clergyman.
"Much good'll your sorrow do me, "
answered indignation, working his way
to the hole through which the driver
conversed with the passengers. He
trod on several corns as he pulled at
the strap. The stage came to halt.
I" want my change" he shouted up
through the hole.
"What change T" shouted down the
driver.
81 put quarter in the box"
More fool you"
=" want none of yonr impudence."
"What do you want then ?"
=" want my change"
You can't fool me that way. How
do 1 know you put quarter in?" And
the driver started. The clergyman
sprang up and pulled the strap and
shouted:
81 put the quarter in, my good man
it is all correct"
"Two of you," retorted the driver,
driving on. Both adlpose and clergy.
man hung on to the strap.
"Confound your or'nary souls, u
roared the driver, edo you want to pull
my leg off? Eff you tech that strap
again I'll come down and bay-window
yer countenances." Again the stage
rolled on.
Permit me, SIR" said the clergy.
man, pulling out a very thin pocket
book, and presenting fifteen cents.
" don't want your money!" was the
gruff response; "I want my own, and
I'm going to have it, and he seized the
strap at the moment an old lady seized
it. The feminine wanted to get out
The driver made no response. In al
instant the fat man, the clergyman, and
old lady were swinging on the strap
The strap suddenly gave way, as If il
or the drivers leg were broken, and
the three, tumbling over each other
fell to the bottom amid roars of laugh
ter from all of us. The stage came tc
halt, and we heard the driver shout
"P'lice p'licep as loud as he could
bawl. A policeman responding, the
driver informed him that there was "f
riot" going on among the lunatics
inside the stage, and "he'd better set
tie 'em before we had another car-hooE
murder" The policeman opened the
door. The belligerents had subsidized
save the old lady, who, attempting tt
get out, was promptly arrested. Iht
fat man explained the case.
GLOW is this, driver ?" asked the po
liceman. "This man says he put {
quarter in your box and you won't giv'
him the change"
"No; I'd think not" was the DIR,
response "the way for him to do is t.
file an affidavy with the surrogate. It'll
only cost him dollar"
| There is but one course for a police
man to pursue, and that is to arres
somebody. If he cannot arrest any on
he puts on a dignifed air and marche
away. In this case the conservator o
the peace compromised. He arrested
the old female party-the only. innocen
actor among US, and held her in dur
ance as far as the sidewalk, and W
rolled on.