The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-03-28
HOME MATTERS.
Pepper and Salt.

Pepper and Salt.
4 couple Of business men in Ottawa oc :apy
The same store, Il chalk line running through
from center of the front doorstep being the d
Vlding line or petition wall. As you enter on the
light you find friedman n Co.'S groceries, and on
the left of this chalk line wall you will see Ed
-nompsons crockery establishment. The
thoughtful customer, aware of these facts, gov
ems himself accordingly. II lie wants crockcry
he enters to the left side, and should he need gro
cer!es he marches in on the right, paying due def
cCence TO the chalk mark. II he should blundcr
in earelessly and tramp upon the chalk he is
promptly elected for running against the aforc.
said wall and promptly sued for damages A fcl.
'Ow went in the other day who was tight" and
wandered prQmiscuousy all over on both sides
Of the line, The boys on either side did not dis
cover what allied the fellow until they had on one
side piled most Of their erockery upon thG conn
ter and the other side had tumblcd down any
quantity Of groceries! They put him GU: and
were much put ont thcmsclves....,W We met Geo.
Mitchell, the T2stauranter one day recently. He
gazed at Us seriously for u moment and then lie
sighed large sized sigh and said in mclan-
iou're not pretty--nQ gOur far from il and other
wise. It's no wonder mat the boy yelled at the
show last summer as Tx Snowman brought the
hippooptamus into the ring, "Iialo! galy! If they
aiA't brngin' OF BeeDus out! Thought they was
agOn 10 give Us suthin' new, we see him every
day-giNe Us a St....Our item last week rcla
tive TO organizing bands Of praying men to labor
With the women who are addicted to the fearful
habit Of tea drinking, has touched the mascu-
Tine public on the right spot so to speak. We
are receiving letters from all parts of the couu-
Try on Tie subject, and now place before our
readers few samples;
OTTAWA March ?, 1874.
Nix. BEEMAs-DtrSur+-Yo he'd Is lcyual on
iue tea bizzniss. My wife and thfc groun daught
ors and their madng ant and my pertickueleriy
deer mother-in-law, they drink tea dredfVb They
are cross when they haiA't got any and whrN thcy
git il they are wuss than ever. You glst come
round with your prayin' band of the men Sccts
"Hd lie CINE ln-yop BET =. SwIpEs.
MAhsFut{,, H., March p, 1874.
Nix. BEE@Qar-fr0r artikcl on tea hits the nail
onto the head pcrZackly It's a worse cuss than
whisly-to my way of thinkin'. We must sup
press tho traffic on tea or our wimmin folks will
70 under the sod | know of several female
reckE which has been made by n supcrnummcr-
Gus yusc OF the heather chinec invention tO-wit
YEA Let US mail men younight and pray for to
yGt Gown Sllch. Jon SAMPSON.
S1REATOR H.. March 81, 1874.
Mn. BELMUs:-ComG along with your praying
band sudden. Bring men of nerve and pluck
We must not only put down tea drinking among
women, but tight cOrsctS, opium eQing,&c. There
ere some women here who take liquor on the
,lv too. and we must sling in Il few prayers for
ihcm. There's my wife she has bought l2S bot
lies of soothing syrup within the last six months
apparently for our little Willie, but when the bill
came around from John l.Omassncy's IL set Inc to
thinking SiXty.four dollars worth OF soothing
syrup is more than six months old child can
AXE and live, TO any great extent with comfort,
inspected the matter. | observed that tile old
women and her H'oftcr always took liberal doses
If it before giving any to the babe and that they
merely went through the motions Of giving the
medicine to him, without letting him more than
touch his lips to the bottle, and invariably itmade
him wink and make ugly faces as though he
didn't like it, while the women would look at one
mother sort of knowing before they tasted 1t as
II saying, Heres luck" and pass it 10 one
another. and after taking a liberal dose would
smack thcrl lips and seem satisfied as il the sooth
ing syrup had filled up great aching void, us 1t
were, III their respective anatomical proportions.
went for the last bottle that came in with that
ill of SGi scritnizcd the contents OF the atorc
said bottle, applied it to my nostrls, then in
serted the bottle in my mouth, turned up the rear
end Of that bottle and let the "moGsscs rum" so
10 speak When ! got through felt that had
also filled void in my system and had square
drink of tirst-class n" worth fifty cents. Come
right along with your praying men and give my
house tussel. 1t needs II, Gin at fifty cents a
nip is too expensive. Yours sorrowfully,
SIMPKINS.
We met fellow ycs,crday who cnqurcd for
D'Riley's store. We surmiscd that this was an
hibcrnicism for Riaes. We sent the party thithcr
We were right and he was happy.....Wc saw q
chap on Wednesday who was weary. He had
taken too much lemon and sugar in hs'n. He
wanted 10 lean up against something to rest
The last we saw o' lin he atfcctionatel,
clinSing to the arm Of the Marshal, who put the
wcdk.leggcd invalid in Jail. Too much benzinc
caused it He hasn't been seen since '''' They
lay that, after u four days fruitlcss hunt fol
game on the recent sdooting expedition by
number Of our Ottawa marksmcn, Henry MAYO
Esq, came in one evening with couple oi duck:
which he threw down at the camp, eXciaiming
There they are, by thunder! and they cost IN,
So piccc,....On the same expedition, Card
NelsoR-not playing Card-had gun that cal
ont Kick a mule. The only time he attempted t,
discharge it he was Kicked back into camp
quarter of 4 mile. lie said he felt cold and mel
anchUiy and taking AN overcoat 10 keep him
warm on the outside and ~. ,t,ier coat Ca; uf .
Jemiohu in the corner, he piously expressed
himself thusly: Ducks be darned. and curling
mp On a buffalo robe went to sleep That, how
De captured those three brants that hc brought
home.
: SHARP II would seem that some Of III,
,anuck> are a, keen after cash their Yankee