The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-07-31
FACTS AND FANCIEs.
"A Chicago man is TO start a co
densed egg factory.

season.
"A Toledo woman muzzled her hus-
band to keep him from kissing the
chambermaid. is il really necessary
9 this time of the year?
Mime. Lind Goldschmidt and Mr.
Sims Reeves are each said TO have n
child whose promise Of future renown
as singer is very great.
Mrs. Lizzie Lloyd Phoenix, the
Russian diamond scandal person, is
known as the "Grande Duchesse IN
: Paris.
: Forty Iowa schoolma'ams couldn't
tell what an abstract question was, but
every one of them understood the
meaning of pop the question.
,, Not one lady in ten bathes nc New
port because it isn't Fenteel, and, fur
thermore, because they look like hor-
rid frights" in bathing costume.
Iowa is the state 20 live in A whole
Sunday School picnic can be thrown
over a bridge twenty-six feet high and
no one but n red-headed girl hurt.
-"Only children and fools sit on the
oeach under an umbrella, says the ex-
asperated Miss Olemade from her elevn-
ted scat overlooking Swampscott beach.
There isn't any special need OF a
Tennessee man taking along his shot
gun when he goes 10 picnic, but they
always feel better for doing Il.
A rich bachelor in Providence de-
clares he will not marry girl who ends
her name in "ie, and all the Fannies,
Josies, and Mnnies are thinking what
hey will do about il.
One Of the most vcxatious things
in the world is 10 have your wife's
uncle kicked in the stomach 10y a horse,
will you 500 900, and then deliberately
get well.
Dom Piatt SAYS the proper thing 30
! do when your horse is running away ~
"to hold fast to your seat aud say your
prayers anyhow, hold fast TO your
| seat"
-Catgut is prepared from the intes-
| tines of the sheep or goat, and the
manufacture is chiefly confined 10 Italy.
| No manufacture Of catgut is known in
| this country.
A man in Stark county. Ind, pays
| his boy ten cents n quart for potato
bugs, and the boy says that II next year
is as good as this he can buy the old
man out.
A year ago young man would be
real good TO his mother on the promise
of a shirt which buttoned behind, but
now such a promise wouldn't swerye
him an inch.
1t is we'll that Marshal Conche is
dead. IL is said that he could make
an ordinary man double up like a case
Of cucumber collie 10y merely glaring at
him. -
More than a hundred people are
drinking warm blood at the Boston alb
attoir for various diseases, and there is
talk of building a hotel 10 accommodate
the patients.
Another old pioneer gone. He
lived at Troy, and he "goned with
81, 900 which did not belong 10 him,
and took along the hired girl 10 COM
fort his old age.
"A Mississippi pilot saw the comet
the other night, and Immediately cried,
GIVE got 'em snakes I've had before,
but now the stars have got tails on EN-;
I'm n dead man."
"A little boy was asked about the
story OF Joseph, and II ho knew what
wrong his brethren done in disposingOf
him, when he replied, Z" suppose they
sold him too cheap"
1T may be all right for the wash
ington clergymen TO have their hair
shipped so short that pinchers won't take
hold, but il wants red noses and black
eyes 10 carry out the illusion.
An old veteran was relating his ex-
ploits TO a crowd Of boyp, and men
toned having been in Eve engagements.
"That's nothing" broke in n little fel.
low, "my sister AgnJ has been engaged
eleven times"
The Vienna city architect has OBJ
tanned permission 10 construct a stove
in the principal cemetery for cremation
purposes, aud an old lady has given 80.
600 forins for the construction OF
others.
"A peddler calling on an old lady to
dispose Of some goods inquired OF her
if she could tell him Of any road on
which no peddler had travelled. " Yes,
replied she, 81 know Of one, and that's
the road TO heaven"
Detroit Free Press Turn for
moment from the Beechor scandai and
ponder over the fact that the footprints
Of Chicago lady on the prairie near
Michigan City got crowd OF men out
TO hunt for a stray elephant"
"A Mississippi doctOr gave a Mem
phis man a box of anti-bilious pills tho
other day, with directions written on the
box 10 "take one pill five times a day"
The pill thus 90 be taken was made, We
presume, Of cast iron.
Mrs. Rapclje. an actress, horse
whipped an Ann Arbor lawyer recently
because Of some reflections on her char
actar which no found IL necessary 10
make in adorning his argument on tho
disuuted Ownerglip OF a stove
At recent reunion Of the alumni
Of West Point IL was voted unanimously
that all living graduates OF the aand-
envy, both from the south and north,
be invited TO join the anniversary din
ner next year, on the 18th OiJune.
One of the oddities Of hot weather
is that of gentleman who
announces through the evening paper
" his readiness 20 supply pulpits for
any denomination or do any other min
isterial work, during the heated term
We find the following item in an
Illinois paper Mn, who has
been in retirement for few weeks after
and burying three sisters,
came up smilingly TO the altar again
yesterday, having begun on a new fam
ily."
"A OlbNtlhuu NouNl VI AhhhNA A"-N
fell in love with parsons
daughter, and, as a clincher 10 his
claims, said 20 the reverend gentleman:
"I go my bottom dollar on piousness,
and will Tpray you for stamps on the
spot"
Miss thackeray, daughter Of the
late novelist, writes that a great num-
Der of letters and signatures purport-
ing 10 have been written by her father
are in circulation. The greater pant
of these are forgeries, and Of remarkn-
bly, good execution.
We do not know why 80 many are
investigating the subjects Of astronomy
and spiritualism at the present time,
without it is because Venus is such
charming medium. She is 10 hold
grand sedRce in December next, when
she will do the tranc, it business for
the whole world.
If fourteen men should commence
tomorrow morning and each horsewhip
a loafer every two minutes night and