Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1874-01-01
Miscellaneous.

To make mouey-Get an sppoint-
ment in the mint
A pretty rough page in natural
history-The rampage.
"You can't DO that again." said the
pig to the boy who cut his tail of.
When are skipping lambs like lit
erary yolumes?-When they are
boundin' sheep.
The Western girl who is said to
have spelled euchre "you-cur" was
evidently thinking of the bow-wow-
ers.
A gentleman in Cleveland rejoices
in the name of Jtdjst.
This is the rock of ages said
the father, rocking two hours. and
the baby still awake.
Bergh, in his lecture al st. Louis,
claimed for the rat a higher place,
so far as utility is concerned, than the
gambler or thief holds.
They celebrate the landing of the
Pilgrims in Wisconsin. 1t is firmly
believed in Milwaukee that the Pill
grims originally landed at that place
with a cargo of lager beer.
Agentleman who rather suspected
some. one was peeping through the
keyhole of his office door, investi-
gated with a syringe full of pepper
sauce. and went home to find his wife
had been eating wood and a chip
had hit her in the eye.
A philosopher says that ga true
man never frets about his place in
the world, but just slides into it by
the gravitation Of his nature, and
swings there as easily as a star"
Mrs. Andrews, of Vermont, said
she didn't care a darn whether din
ner suited her husband or not, and a
Justice fined her seven dollars.
E. NJ. Norton, President of the
great Norton Iron Works, at Ash
land, Kentucky, estimates that the
mill will turn out about 500 kegs of
nails a day, besides making pig iron
from the rich ore near by, and will
employ over 400 operatives.
A kind lady who sent a ~mince-pie
to our Office the other day, with the
request tc "please insert" is assured
that such s~rticles are never crowded
out by a press of other matter.
There is one good thing about
babies" says q late traveller; ''they
never change. We have girls of the
period, men of the world, but the
baby is the same self possessed. fear
less. laughing, voracious little heather
in all ages and in all countries.
A farmer sem to an Orphan Asy-
lum for a boy that was smart, active,
brave, tractable, prompt, industrious,
clean, pious, intelligent, cookbook
ing, reserved and modest. The Su
perintendent wrote back that unfor-
tunately they had only human boys
in that Institution.
A Boston %till-tapper recently pur-
chased q half gallon of molasses at a
grocery, and, in default of q jug, got
the grocer 10 pour it in his hat, which
vas no sooner done than he clapped
the hat over the grocer's head, and,
while the latter was suffering
through the flood of syrup. delibe-
rately robbed the drawer and de.
camped. Experience is a harsh
teacher, but an infallible one; and
that grocer has probably learned now
the meaning of the proverb, Sweet
are the uses of adversely"
The Columbus Rolling Mill Com
pany has rolled its heaviest since the
panic began.
Fourteen hundred strikers will soon
resume work in the Troy, New York,
Mills, after six months of idleness.
Rev. Henry Lang, of Fremont Lu-
theran Church, in thirty years min
istry. hiss had l6 $500 communicates.
married l, l6O, preached LOO funeral
sermons, and baptized $500.
Beware of profanity. The Boston
man who was ''cursing" an editor the
other day fell dead on the spot, and
other cases of the same sort are report
ed In Colorado, hnwever, no man
eyer fell dead while hurting vigorous
expressions at an editor. As soon as
the visitor begins to manifest premon
itory symptoms of that sort of thing
the Colorado editor quietly shoots him
before the swearing comes in.
The following advertisement ap
peared in the Jamaica, N Y, Standard
of the Goth ult: Hog Guessing. Mr..
I O'Brien. of the Union Hotel, in
this village. announces. that, oil Thurs
day, December 4lh, 1873 at 2 P. M,
he will kill the finest aud latest hog
ever slaughtered in Queens county,
which will then be guessed for. The
animal is supposed TO weigh eight hun
dred pounds. Chances, fifty cents.
The nearest guess will take the hog;
the next, the overplus money"
"How much are these fearful bulbs
BY the quartz" asked a maiden of a