The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1874-08-21
.niSEEs.A q LOGS.

Chlfu pIay-StatrtinB d new u1iAJ pa
per in Baltimore.
Gid big knaYe. and little honest
men will worship him.
PottsvilIe rats twirl their fore-legs
against their noses sarcastically at rat
traps.
A long MINDED orator is said to have
q sleeping car attached to his train of
thought.
1t is a strange fact that the wise men
learn more from fools than fools do from
wise men.
Ncte-shavers succeed financially be-
cause they ''take so mnch interest IN
their business
Dayton, Ohio, has 308 grain elevators.
The grain, however, is elevated ID it's
liquid form.
Somebody has noticed that nineteen
out of every twenty newspaper men have
straight noses.
"Oss-car Fool-some" is the way Buf-
falo spells the name of the president Of
it's consolidated street railways.
The fool seeketh to pick fly from a
mules hind leg. The wise man letteth
out the job to the lowest bidder.
Memphis husbands punish their wives
nv making them sit on chunks OF ice
while they knit the heel of a stocking.
.sCan't they train Cinnamon To eat
grasshoppers?" is the conundrum pro-
pounded by interested parties in the
West.
Where is George Francis Train? He
ought to be in the Beecher-Tilton scan
DIAL. Get in, George. there is room for
one more.
81 wouldn't have left, but the people
kinder egged me on" said q man who
was asked why he quit his Kansas home
IN hurry.
The Milwaukee man--who tied his dog
to q wagon-wheel to learn him 70 be
Goa, - dog, is Disguised with the whole
busi Jess.
A suffalo paper announces that by the
recent burning of an ice house there,
twenty thousand tons of ice were re
duced to ashes.
The B, ,ston Globe thinks the depth
of deprad. .tion is tub-race. The Globe
ought TO see a Brooklyn policeman
chased by q burglar.
A chap VII spent $500 to graduate
from Harvard, is Postmaster III Iowa, AZ
ooA mar wear Where would he have
been bat for his Latin and Greek?
Rector's daugl ,ter to Sunday school
"Oh. YOU have an elder brother; we'll,
how old is hep" Schoolboy-'' dunno,
miss. but he has 1s5 started o'swear-
ing"
The log cabin hsch Mr.. Lincoln
made when sixteen We, Va old, stands In
seven different counties afa Illinois, and
they haven't got throug. counting yet.
The first mosquito Of he season was
captured near Newark, N. j., recently
after killing two dogs al vi biting OF
nine inches of his captors e "
'sSam, why don't You ta N1 to your
master and tell him to lay up treasures
in Heaven?" "Whats de use of. hlm
laying mp treasures up dar! H,'inever
cum gal
It is said that Barnum has OF eked
Weston 5000 TO walk against time. ' 'Ay
can't somebody offer $1,000 to wa u
against stone wall or q buzz saw? ash 6
the Boston Globe.
One reason why Indianapolis has so
many burglaries is because fellow has
| to ''crack' from six to twelve houses to
get money enough to pay his railroad
| fare out OF town.
4 want you to retract what you said
In this mornings Herald, or L will cut
your bloody heart out, is speciment
of the notes received BY the enterpris-
ing local editor OF the Dubuque Herald.
Engaging candor: Papa-''And pray
sir, what do you intend to settle on my
daughter? and how do you mean to
live p Intend a-'I intend, sir, to
settle myself on your daughter, and live
on you!''
MY son, now that The boys have won
bit Saratoga, and thereby shown the
mental superiority of the college facul-
", 1 would like to send you to Column
pia, but It's too near Brooklyn; too near
BROOKLYN.
"What brought you to prison, my
plored friend?' said aYankee to negro.
Two constables, sab. Eyes, but I
can had intemperance anything to do
18th it?' Eyes sab, dey was boz of 'em
INK"
The Zionsville girls don't spend ''all
Eeir time trying to Climb the holy
Ill of Zion" for on their way home
Fom pic-nics they attack defenceless
Dung men and kiss them bv main force.