New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1874-08-10
pAsrnRS AND PEOPLE.

4 wOMAN's VIEWS OF THEIR PROPER RELATIONS
10 me Edttor Of The Tribune.
SIR: VIII YOU allow a stranger TO call your
attention 70 an article The NeTOrk O6serrer OF July
81 entitled Lesson for the Day suggested oy the
Tuc Of the Hour" which s getting widely COPIED
sd IN tho excitement Of the hour receives much Tn
thinking APPROVAL think you viii agree with me mat
such doctrines as are therein incucated. Il received AS
trlth would soon break down churches by destroying
al he usefulness and peasantness OF what Is caIied
ile pastoral relation" Certainly the confidence when
women with true womany repose ID ministers
S.lld be changed 70 distrust. And, what would be
worse they would become accustomed 10 selfdstrust
and self-wachfuness AMI would also md themselves
g. watched and suspected by others that all simplicity
an raukuess and freedom in their intercourse Win 'he
minister would be destroyed. Now It seems 10 me tAaI
h. must De- q very evl-mnded man who lets the great
scandal OF the cav make him suspicious Of ministers ana
women As for myself l. woman, honor ministers and
women; and II The minister whom. from my chuihoOd
until now Ibave reveenced and loved should at last SINK
low that his good can have no resurrection III
tbs e Will the more carefully guari my sell against
su-YicoB and give 10 ministers the confidence WINCH
Va very few exceptions. am sure they deserve
few dlvs ago a woman Of the world was talking
about the great scandal" and she said 70 me: II
on shows careful women ought 70 be ao)u! trust
r. ii ministers" Aud II seemed 20 be her idea that L
Nj Beecher should al last be proved guilty,
ministers very generally would lose the fll confidence
O. the people But weakened faith would be the
natural result OF NJ Beechers fall surely we all need
T. be urged 10 confidence goodness aud good
MOI instead Of being told 70 keep sharp LOOKOUT ana
lytlu sraigaUacket forevermOre. Any other advice
sypears 10 me 20 have IN il little common sense or
ruth A1ditis an insult alike 70 minister's and %
women Now and then hear Of editor being a
b. u.an. aud then starts up aud says that
great many editors are corrupt n N, and that ali
women especially women who write for newspapers
should beware OF them. And now ministers are the
tat Is being shO. at But surely there IS no bet
ter class OF men IN the world than ministers. believe
them TO be- with here ami there exception, men Of
simple, pure lives; aad wleu they are men OF wisdom
an judgment, as Wei as piey, they often prove The
very best advisers and De plrs that women can possibly
End. And l dare 20 say 20 the whole world thaj be
Utve that woman may fad sympathy and suppor
IN society OF her beloved pastor and 20 20 MIN as
featlessiy ana trlstingy there had never been
Henry Ward Beecher and an Elizabeth Tutou.
myself: nave never happened 10 70 TO any min
User for sympathy aud support" 1, has never been
o. happy lot 20 have ca beloved pastor but thou
sands upon thousands OF women have had "a beloved
p-tor" And tl!ns thatH a woman hears the STIR
c.4s words u ler eloquent pastor" ami d" IL
rlu-et. warned. s0othed or exalted size has
night TO "oclevc him 20 be the sent
% DO hey good" L she have common sense she viii be
hcyc ana 5, she have right feeling she VII not
conceal her gratitude" but VIII 20 ITO his
study hat dangerous place and tell him so" and
o.. liu Know UucI JYuCQt slc uu4- 10 his
WORKS" ,l hat al ministers had much OF hOl-
aud 1aavaI their preicI =, that al good
would be cJus--I.led 90 % them and Leo them know
cha, they filling them with jOv. peace, and love-"
AZ o. "yearn8g Irer affinity and Communion o.
SOUL. and kindred spr.s,' that Is talk of very dir
'eraut r.. and lot one woman o a million ever uses
such .lU-uaEe o. minister. Bat every woman with
.r.e w1maulv soul her viii DO, withhold from any
good aud true minister the expression Of her gratitude
appreciation u minisIatons in the pu pit and
D. good aud loving work out OF 10 Aud II should b.
eft 20 her own goo! taste and decscy 10 decide how
ADD where she shall approach MIN. In cases out Of
eD woman prefers 10 see her minister alone II she
wishes O. et MN know that his words have been q" a
precious revelation 70 her thirsty soul" Most women
10 NOT crave publicity. or The presence OF even third
oersou. when th.v Wish speak OF the hidden life Of
Fou ll the s.I.. And This ia whether a woman
"aut- 10 tax I -er minister OF 20 her own sex
Aw0man naturally seeks privacy when +e wants 70
ala o. any her religious lie: and r il eouaJv
LAe tlat she seeks privacy u sIe have troubles aDd
.- To bear e~e trouble, anI trlas alone rsvea ling
.A.l 10 none DIt the Got HIS promised u De
.-iusc l distress would. perhaps. often be we'll But
70 thousands OF cases men aud women need advice aud
1ep. and 1t not true that ministers are
'ensurabie IA high degree who encourage their
people. men y women, 10 come 20 them
VIII family matters, secret sores" Surely the hid
den work OF Christian minister, when he meets the
confidence repOsl ~ HIN with wise advice and svnna
n.y. De- ais high and best work. I know Of more than
one woman Who has been encouraged by her minister TO
stay vitn her Dad husband and wait patiently for his
sllyaI.a.
Asi.A it is s1id: Al Juiic.oIs pastors discourage
familiarity oa tue part tIeir people, especially OF the
female DENOMINATION" They DO no sucn thing They
encourage familiarity II true that they do not allow
themselves 10 Oe curious and pryiug and DO moi force
say" "'' ""eie 'Aey are not hidden % come but they
Go seek 90 make themselves the familiar friend Il, ,h
none VI tAlf parish and they ger access 70 bear,s
tlat iAeF coud never reach Ia any other vyav IN 80
~ Nl-e minister died four i've wears AGO 7 re-
lot at al fond of bis preaching I, was to- -,
Oi'"o-'A' b-. MS ne as a pastor was beaufiful
ne Il HYed ol the most familiar terms with ali ms
hock Thus encouraged, men and women opened tbotr
hearts ana told OF troubles that had driven th, .,
re verge OF despair They told Of sns the burden
3fvAcA Was too heavy Tor them 70 bear alone and he
told then 10 cease 20 do EVIL % hope in Gods ercv
Young men and yOung women told him their troubles
ald found IN him safe friend ana wise adviser He
rel an carried with hun into the other word all the
secrets tAat had been nrusted him He left not one
behind hlD. NOT his wife knew what had been
Told o. Llu And whatever may be SAID about conlpay
1-g that TO the IJnlsA confessional" and censurng
and Howuiag upon that intimacy. +" which we are
'oI ought 70 exist only the domestic circle" Sun
remains t'1e that that intimacy blessed thousands
where u has harmed one.
l. MIS- I'lton s to-day a ID en- woman and Mr.
@'o0"e' I4llen man--blt 10 one knows them
70 Dr. tLus fallen-the great and SAD fact does
ot al al prove that ministers and women ougbt from
' VINE lOI ara 70 be afraid Of ach other When fear
steps II, trust and love, all that makes the rs,orI
relation as % j. called, useful anu beautiful sten ou
II dozen Mrs. rtOus should fall nv fath in ,voror
01'u DC uAshaAen' ana u should b. proved that the
men who lured them 20 destruction we're All ninist,,
should not remove my faith from ministers or cease 70
Nse'e tAsI pastor ought to be the true aud tired