The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1874-02-10
Agritu!tars, s1lart
EASY READING.

p f-Ss sssss ------- - s9aU =.
Drunk for penny dead drunk for
two penAiesi straw for nothing. Lon
don sign, m
The coming tailor will incorporate a
square of sanapaper in smokers PANTS
= Dan5ary Neps 81.
The Hartford Times has invented a
new verb Itssys that City Treasurer
Gage. of Chicago, has "irregulated' to
the amount of S4DO, 900
Scotch Keeper. Ito Young Sports.
man )-ssYe hae shot a boy" Young
Spoitsman-aGodtl heavens! Is it
Ipossible2 What shall / do Y. Keeper
(immoyable -sGie him shullin-"
Now chat Treasurer Spinner is bound
| for asrecuI tsass's trip to Florida, some
fone says be d gtfng 70 sneshler By the
romantic crocodile bayons that lie may
discover if the footprints of those crea.
lures really do resemble his autograph.
Tom-'.Hallo, Fred? What! You
writing poetry 2 Fred-Yes, I'm wri-
ting an otced to nv tailor" Tom
Whats the time and tune ?" Fred
"Time, sixty-days... It's set to note of
mine in his kee- ping" -
julia Ward Howe says that "there is
nothing but dumb submission for the
women" There isn't, eh ? She ought
to meander through this State and look
upon the splintered rolling pins and
battered potato mashers.-Detr5it Free
Press
"Well, neighbor, what is the most
Christian news this morningT said a
gentleman to friend Il have. just
bought a barrel of -four for a poor wo,
man." "Juss like you! Who is it
you have made happy with your char
| ity this time3" "My wife"
abraham, my pet, where ia your
father ?" Don't know, mother, but
guess he's gone over to Deacon Dlllber-
rvs pasture after bis black sheep 'kase
l seen Widder Higgins going over that
way" That boy got licking before
breakfast next morning.
There would seem to be splendid
opening at Ekhorn, New. for preach
er who isn't too particular about tri6es,
the last one they had there having been
requested by his congregation,t the other
day, to leave, .sbecause he was so
mighty nice that he wouldn't even hold
the stakes at horse race" d.
Down in Texas horse thieves go in
gangs, headed by a pretended clergy.
man, who gets up protracted and zeal
Gus meetings, and while be is taking the
congregation upward on the wings Of
his eloQuence the rank and file make a
descent, steal all the horses, and are off
before their presence is known.
/ Presence of mind at dre is a great
thing. At Lincoln, Nebraska, recently,
at q fire an over-thonghtful party rush
ed to an ameteur collectors menagerie
and opened the pen doors Tor all his
animals An owl, an antelope, and two
prairie wolves struck for home the elks,
deers, buffalos, etc, stuck to the pens
Spriggins is a little forgetful some.
times. He counted his brood the other
night but could only make out fourteen.
..'How is this ?" be asked his wife. 81
thoug ht there were fifteen of them q.
the last census" $50 there were," az
swered his wife, "but little Sammy was
drowned siuce then" s'Iudeed!" said
epriggins, medi.atively "Why, it seems
to me Iheard Of that at the time,
"If you don't see what you want, ask
for it," is posted in conspicuous place
in o Logansport grocery. A native
stepped into the establishment, last week.
BE saw the card and remarked Il want
a ten dollar bill and don't see IT,
''Neither do 10 was the laconic reply.
The native "looked further" but as he
left he advised the grocer to stake down
that sign"
A scientific writer has made the dis
covery that a "tinker's dam" is not pro
family, but simply ON inclosare made
commonly of bread around the hole to
he mended, that the melted solder may
be contained till it cools off around the
bread. Alter being subjected to this
process the bread is burned and spoiled,
and is a fitting type ofutter uselessness.
A conscientious Sunday School teach
er, who felt panied upon looking
through crack in the fence at seeing
some of his scholars IA attendance ap-
on the trials of speed at the fair, asked
one of them if he did not think there
was great waste of time at the races.
The younger replied that he thought
"there was thdndering sight too much
time lost in scoringr'
A common fellow in California, who
was made a target for revolver practice,
has been kept in Jail as a witness for
two months past, while the gentleman
who shot him has been out on ball.
Law being the, perfection of human
wisdom, we are not presumptuous
enough to question the equity of such
q procedure, but the obvious moral is
that 1t is better and more lawful te
shoot a Californian than to he shot al
by him.
A hot tempered citizen of Arkan ans,
fancyng that Methodist revival
preacher meant him in one of his poin
ted sermons, sent him challenge The
minister accepted it, stating that the
weapons would be "Bihles ard PRAYER
books" This nonpiussei the challen.
ger, and he procured "court of hon
or" to sit on the matter: The cour
which consisted of six experienced du
ellists, decided that the. clergyman wal
at fault, as no gentleman, when chal
lenged, has right to accept weapon.
to which the challenger is totally unac
customed
Ain't Cheese Dindins9
The following happened in one Of on
ladies furnishing stores:
! a man somewhat the worse for lIu'Io