The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1874-05-20
THE NASBY LETTERS.
Mr.. Nasty and His Friends Guard
Against the Female Crusaders-Mr.
BascOm's InOrdf Innate Sci fshneSs.
CoNFEDERIT Y ROADS
(Which is in the State NV kentucky-)
1871

CoNFEDERIT y ROADS }
witch is in the State NV Kentucky.) :.
April p, 1874. J
When the wimmin destroyed wot
whiskev BaScom he'd on hand two
weeks ago. a gloom settled onto the
entire Corners. With the exeepshun
of the little saved, wich drirped thro
the floor, there was not drop NV
ennything within reach. Parched,
burned up, l exclaimed one mornin in
agony, with the anshent mariner:
"Water. water everywhere,
But not a drop to drink"
Three days passed, and Deekin Po-
gram staggered into Bascom's, taintin
and we'll nigh exhausted.
Hey the supplies come ylt" asked
the good old man.
Mary" sed Bascom, tear glitirn
in his left eye and rollin pensively
down his face, washin out a furrow for
itself as it rolled.
In one korner on a nail keg sat Is
saker Pogram with his face berried in
his hands, the pikter of woe, while
Kernel McPelter laid out on a bench
breethin heavily.
Imagine men in the Crate Sayhara
Desert with their water all gone.
Imagine men on a raft in mid ocean
with no water.
Then 700 will get faint idee of the
condishun VIC wuz in.
At last one mornin Bascom's oldest
son, Jehial, who had kept at the Sta
shen at Secesshunville all the time for
two weeks, with single wagon wuz
seen ridin down the hill, urjin the
mule to its utmost speed.
'.Hooray!" sed Bascom, lit hez come
at last.'
Immejitly there wuz change. Dee
kin Pogram riz, and f;tllin on his knees
sed devoutly, Thank Hevinsr' Issa-
ker sprang to his feet, and Elder PEN
nibaeker and McPelter shouted. Ha.
Hai with ez much power ez they he'd
left in EN-
Thauk the Lord the mule didn't
baulk. Ez if impressed with the i'm
portance NV its mishen, it come up
CALAMITY to the door, and backed up
squarely, that the precious load mite
be easily and quickly taken out, 1t
wuz unloaded safely; the spigot wuz
druy in, bottle wuz filed, We drank
the revivin draft and wuz $: we'd,
But how to perfect our treasure wuz
the question. Lueindy Gayitt had
awore she would bust every barrel Nv
iEdt W uZ
and we knowd she wood keep her oath
eff 1t WIZ possible.
Issaker sejes ted that she be pizened
but that idee wuz yoonanimously re-
jected.
"Hev | no friends?" askt Issaker.
DO 700 ali hate me2"
A good many other plans wuz dis
cusst to head off this terrible female,
but none nv EN- seemed feasible.
At last l hit it. [ sed that we must
guard it with our strong rite arms. Let
US arm ourselves with ax-helves and
go out on each NV the four roads and
stop by force every woman who ap-
pears on the streets, onless it is certain
she hez no hostile intenshuns. Let us
20 in twos-eight will suffice. Let US
be stern and inflexible.
Wv course sed I. 1.-THE pickets
will be entitled to their sustenance,
gratis. while In active service
Certainly, sed Bascom. at regular
intervals when no enemy is in site,
they may come In and get refresher
and git back to their dooty.h
Then came trouble wich had not
anticipated Every man in the Corners
volunteered to 60 on guard duty. That
free drink wuz bounty wieh fetched
EN-.