The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1874-08-10

juss innocent enough to believe things
which other boys pitch out Of the
window without a second thought
When Christopher was going on
nine years old be heard some one sag
that a penny saved was two pence
earned lie therefore laid a big
Bungdon away in a crack under the
mob-board. aud every day be looked
to see Il grow 10 two cents. He had
conGd nce aad patience, but at length
both : re way. Then be got the
cent our. and one day Mrs. Norton's
baby swallowed. it. The youthful
Christopher didn't believe in maxims
quite as much as before, but he didn't
cut all bis eye teeth yet
When this boy was q year older
he heard It said that truth was
mighty and must prevail, and that a
boy who always spoke the truth
would surely make a great and good
man. He commenced to tell the
truth. One day be got his fathers
best razor out and hacked 1t on a
stone. and when the Oh gent came
home and asked who in blazes mad
done. that, Christopher Columbus
spoke up and said:
1T was /, father-l notehed your
old razor" al
"You did eh?u sneered the old
man. as be looked up into a peach
tree. awen, I'll fix you won't never
notch another razor for me.." /
And be cut a budding limb and
dressed that boy down until the
youth saw stars. That night Chris
topher Columbus determined never
to tell the truth again unless by acct
dent. and through all his life be stuck
to the resolution.
When the lad was about twelve
years old he read in a little book
ahonestv is the best policy" be didn't
more than half believe it, but he
thought he'd try. He went to being
honest. One day his mother sent
him to the grocery to buy eggs, and
Billy Jones induced him to sqaander:
the change in the purchase Of soda
water. When he got home his moth
er asked him for the. little balance,
and Christopher explained.
Spent it for soda, eh?" She replied.
Here your poor mother is working
like a slave, and you are around swil-
ling soda waterl / don't think you'll
swill any more, ! don't! Come over
my right knee"
And she agitated him in the live
lest manner. That night as he turn
ed on his downy strawbed the boy
made up his mind that honesty didn't
pay, and he resolved to cheat the
whole world if he could.
When Christopher was a half year
older he came across the injunction,
"Be kind to the poor" He did not
know whether it would pay or not,
but be set about it. He knew of a
poor woman who sadly needed a
spring bonnet, and took over his
mothers, along with a few other
things, including his fathers second
pair of boots, his own Sunday shoes
and so on. He went around feeling
very big hearted until the old gent
wanted to 60 to the lodge q night
and then it came out.
Gin away my boots, eh?" inquir-
ed the father; plugged your mothers
best bonnet off, eh? Well, don't
think you'll remember the poor very
much later tonight"
And be pounded Christopher Co
lumbus with a pump handle until The
boy tainted away, and eve made a
thorough job oft.
They fooled the boy once more.
He heard a rich man say that every
body should make hay while the
sun shone." So when there came a
suny day be went out, took his faith
er's scythe down from the plum tree
and went to making hay. He broke
the scythe, cut down the tulips and
hacked his sister in the heel, and his
mother came out and led him around
by the hair and bounced him until he
almost went into a decline. They
couldn't bamboozle this boy after
that. lie grew wicked every day of
his life, and before his eighteenth
birth day arrived he was hung for
murder. He said he didn't care a
huckleberry about it, and died with
out making the usual Fourth Of July
Grafton.