Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-06-18
Aumuruus department.
ssDE PERVISIONS, JOSIAR."

IueIs, OVertOOh Ill Olu ueSTO Oll Llle StIeeIS
the other day, and wedging him in fence
corner, proceeded to acquaint him with all
the gorgeous provisions of the Civil Rights
Bill. Young Africa impaired to old Africa
a fund Of valuable information, thusly:"
"Well, Uncle Billy, Summers Swivel
Rights Bill has passed de Senate oh de
United States widout murmur'
"Is dat so, Josar ?"
jess so, Uncle Billy. And say, Uncle
Billy, we colored pussons is gwine to see
whose pervisions is in de pot. We are gwine
to be allowed to ride free on de railroads.
smoke in de ladies' car and put our feet on
de percussions of the seats whenever we dam
pleasew
"Is dat so, Josiar?'
"Jess so, Uncle Billy. And say, Uncle
Billy, we's gwiue to be allowed to stop at de
hotels and set at de head oh de table, and hab
de biggest slices of de chickens, and lay round
in de parlor and spit on de carpets, and make
de white trash hustle demselves and wait on
us widout grumblin and whenever de boss OBJ
de concern shoves bill on US, we'll hab him
sent to Washington and obscured in the pleni-
potentiary."
"1s dat so, Josiar?"
"Jess so, Uncle Billy. And say, Uncle
Billy, wes gwine to be allowed to 60 to the
white schools and set up on de fatform wild de
teacher, and learn gehography, tiggermanom-
etry, gehominy, Latin, Dutch, French, Choc-
taw, algeebray, rheumatics, de rule of thrice
and de diaphragam."
"Good God is dat so, Josiar?"
"Jess so, Uncle Billy. And say, Uncle
Billy, wes gwine to be allowed to be buried
in italic coffins wild looking glasses on top OBJ
dem, and dey will hab to carry US on herse
to de grabe yard and bury us on top oh de
white folks, so when de day OBJ resurrection
am arrived, and de angel Gabriel come tootin
along, he'll sing out treo his trumpet, All
OBJ you colored gemmen rise fust! And say,
Uncle Billy, de pervisons of dat bill"
whats dat you say bout pervisions, Jo-
siar?"
"Well, Uncle Billy, as was gwiue on to
state, de pervisions of dat bill"
"Stop right dar, Josiar. You say dare's
pervisions in dat bill p
"Jess so, Uncle Billy. Depervisions OBJ de
bill"
"Stop right dar, Josiar. Eff dare's pervis-
ions in dat bill, I want sack OBJ -four this
berry mint. Dam de smokin' in the ladies'
car, and de gehography, and de Latin and de
italic cofins! l want de pervisons, Josiar.
Dey's all dere is in de bill wuf a dam cent p
Fayetteville Express.
PoKER-PLAYING IN ALABAMA.-Bill j.,
the Sheriff of our county (Colbert), Jealous
poker-player, and prosperous Teutonic mer-
chant of our town named s., were travelling
on the cars, and, in order to pass the time,
engaged in game of euchre. After playing
some time, the jolly Dutchman left his seat
to get drink of water, and Bill knowing that
he, too, had penchant for poker, took ad-
vantage of his absence and dealt him hand
with four kings and turned up the queen for
trump. Returning in moment and lifting
his hand, S. at once conceived the idea of
playing the hand at poker, and accordingly
suggested it 10 Bill, who consented, providea
that he might be allowed to discard one of his
cards and take up the queen. To this S. at
once agreed and the game proceeded. Says
S.: "Bill I bets you S." In turn Bill raised
him $40 more. "Well," says S., "S15 will
joost pay mine expense und some odder tings,
and 1 calls you, Bill - at the same time ex-
hibiting his hand with four kings, and reach
ing for the money. "Hold on" says Bill.
81 have four aces" Nervously, and in silence,
the astonished Dutchman gathered the cards
and shufled them for a moment or two.
Then, with his chin resting on both clenched
hands, and his eyes staring into uncertainty,
he exclaimed, II say Bill, joost you told me
vot de h-U dot queen had to do init dot hand"
And up to this hour his mind is perplexed
continually to find the part that card had
played in the game.-Correspondence Of Cou-
rier-Journal.
PUNCTUALITY AT DEATH-Mr. Higgins
was a very punctual man in all his transac-
tions through life. He amassed large prop
erty by untiring industry and punctuality,
and at the advanced age of ninety years was
resting quietly upon his bed, and calmly
waiting to be called away. He had delibe-
rately made almost every arrangement for his
decease and burial His pulse grew fainter
and the light of life seemed just Pickering in
its socket, when one of his sons Observed
"Father, you will probably live but a day
or two; is it not we'll for you to name your
bearers?"
"To be sure, my son" said the dying man,
"it is we'll thought Of and I will do it now."
He gave list of six, the usual number,
and sank back exhausted upon his pillow.
A CLEAN of thought passed over his withered
face like ray of light, and he rallied once
more.
"My son, read me that list. Is the name Of
Mr.. Wiggins there?"
"It is, my father"
"Then strike it off," said he, emphatically,
'for he was never punctual-was never any
where in season-and he might hinder the
procession whole hour"
CIRCUMSTANCES ALTER CAsEs-Deacon
W was boss carpenter, and Baptist
in "good reg'lar standin," in Rome, Oneida
county, N. Y, more than forty years ago.
One day, while he was with his men on the
third staging of a new Baptist church which
he had contracted to build, he heard one Of
the hands utter an oath, and he at once began
a sermon on the sin of swearing. Just as he
had arrived at the most impressive part of
the discourse, the platform on which they were
standing gave way. The deacon threw up his
arms and gazing Heavenward, exclaimed,
'Lord, have mercy" The staging settled
straight downward, struck the second platform
and that too, trembled moment and then
gave way. Again the deacon looked skyward
and repeated, "Lord have mercy" Then, as
the combined weight Of the two platforms, in,
cluding the deacon and his four men, reached
the last staging, and that tottered an instant
and went down, the deacon, thinking his
doom was at hand, fairly shouted, "Lord, haze
mercyr' But when the entire mass struck
the solid ground with final crash, and no.
body was hurt, the deacon glanced at the