Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1874-08-20

BROOKLYN, Feb. Z, 1871.
my DEAR Mrs. TILToN: When l You
last / did not expect ever TO you again, or to
be alive many days. God was kinder to me than
were my own thoughts The friend whom God
sent to me (Moulton) has proved above all friends
that l ever had able and willing TO help me IN
this terrible emergency of my life HIS hand IL
was that tied up the storm thatw ready to burst
on our heads. You have no friend, Theodore eX-
cepted, who has it in his power to help you so
vitality and who will do it with such delicacy and
honor. 1t does my sore heart good TO see III
MOultOn an Unfeigned respect and honor for YOU
It would kill me II | thought otherwise lie VIII
be : true u friend to your honor and happiness
az a brother could be to sister. In him we have
a common ground. You and may meet in him.
The past is ended. but is there no future? no
wiser, higher, hOlier future May not
this friend stand as priest in the new
sanctuary of reconciliation and mediate,
and bless Theodore and my most unhappy self!
Do not let my earnestuess fail OF its end. 1ou
believe in my judgment. | have put myself
wholly and gladly in MOultOn hands, and there
| must meet you. This is sent with TheOdores
consent. bat he has not read it. VIII you return
it to me by his own hand: I am Very earnest IN
this wish for all our sakes. as such letter ought
not to be subject TO even the chance OF mlScar-
H W. BEECHER.''
have no recollection of seeing or hearing read
the letter OF Mr.. Titon OF the same date. In my
letter TO Mrs Tilton | alluded to the fact that L
did nor expect when saw her last to be aIlve
many days. That statement stands connected
with series Of symptoms which l hrst expe-
rienced in 1856. [ went through the Fremont
campaign, speaking in the open air three hours
at q time three days III the week. In re-
ncwinr nv literary work felt that must have
given way. very seriously thought that was
going 10 have apoplexy or paralysis or something
of the kind. On two or three occasions, while
preaching l should have fallen in the pulpit II L
had not held on 20 the table. Very often came
near falling in the streets During the last fifteen
wears | have gone into the pulpit l suppose lJO
times with 4 very strong impression thatI should
never come of il alive. Have preached more
srrmors than any human being would believe
vi 10 all while that whatever l mad rot
to saw to nv people must say 1t then. or never
would have another chance to use H. II l had
consulted 4 physician, his irst aGTlGe would have
been. Y on must stop work. but was in such
q situation that l could not stop work. read the
best medical books on symptoms OF nervous
prostrati0n. and ovcrWork. and paralysis,
and formed NV own judgment of my
case. The three points | marked were: | must
have good digestion, good sleep. and / must 90
on working These three things were to be rec
Oncied. and in regard TO my diet. and stimuants,
and medicines l made the most thorough and
searching trial and, result, managed my
body 50 that l could get the most work out of 1t
without essentially impairing it. If l had said
word about this to my family 1t would have
brought such distress and anxiety on the part of
my wife a. could not bear. have for many
/ wears so steadily taxed my mind to the utmost
| that there have been periods when l could not
| afford 10 have people express even sympathy
/ with me. To have M vic or friends anxious
about it. and showing II 10 ne, would be just the
| In 1Sfs 7 rame again into the same condition
inst brfor, c,,iu,r 10 England, and it was one of
| those reasons WY WIS wishin, to 20. The war
! was AT its height. | carried my country in NV
I heart | had The Independent in charge. and was
! working preaching and leCturing continually 1
knew was likely 10 Ee Frustrated again. In De-
CJmbyr l>10 the sudden shock Of these troubles
! brought on again these symptoms in more yio-
| lent form was very much depressed in mind
! add all the more because II was one OF those
things that could not say anything q bout I was
silent with everybody. During The last four
years these symptoms have been Repeatedly
brought oI, by my intense work. carried forward
/ on an UNDERLYING basis OF 20 much sorrow and
trclbI. Nv friends viii bear witness that in the
pulpit I have very frequently alluded 10 nv ex-
I pcCtaGiun OF sudden death.
! feel that have more than once already been
near STroIr. that would nave killed or par4lyzed
! me. and carry with HE now. as 1 have 30 often
/ carried il. wears before this uoUble began. the
. daily Thought of death door which might
open for m. II any moment, out Of al cares and
/ labUrs iuto welcome rest
Duru. the whole of the year 1871 was kept in
! state Of SUSPENSE and doubt not only q 10 the
I future Of the iaIaily Tor the reunion and happi-
/ ness Of which | had striven earnestly bul Us
10 the decree 10 which might personally be sub
jecl To attack and misCunStruction. and the
! trouble be brought into the church and magnitied
by publicity The officers OF the church sought
! 10 Investigate into Mr. TitOn's religions views
ana moral conduct. and on the latter point had
been deceived INTO The belief that he was not in
| 4Ulj. - 70 the religious views, I still hoped