The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-12-18
Canuassing for the Heathen.

A man about thirty years old, wear
ing a battered plug hat and seedy
clothes, looking as hungry as man who
had been wrecked on an iceberg, and
evidently an inpostor, softly entered
Gratiot avenue saloon yerterday, and
leaning over the bar whispered to the
proprietor:
"My dear sir, I am canvassing for
subscriptions for the benefit of the
heather"
"Ish dat 20? ?" replied the saloon
keeper rinsing a glass.
eyes, my friend, that is So" contin
ued the man, taking out very greasy
pass-book. eyes, l am collecting
money for the benefit of the poor
beathen, who are living in a state of
vice and ignorance. Some put down
ten dollars-some fve-some one, all
give something. Here is the book, and
you can subscribe such an amount as
you think best"
'Ish it bettition to dem common
council ?" inquired the saloonist, as he
looked at the book.
"No, sir, you do not understand my
object. / am collecting subscriptions
for the benefit of the heather, and you
can write your name and give me such
an amount as your conscience directs.
"Vere ish dem heathens?" inquired
the beer-seller, looking coldly at the
strangers battered hat.
I'm Africa, replied the agent, " in
far-of Africa, where all is gloomllness
because the heather has no education"
"And what county is dat Africa In? "
inquired the saioonist.
"My dear man, Africa is country
a great big country, far DER the deep
blue sea. Is it possible that you never
heard of African"
ST hat lived in Toledo and Chicago,
but didn't hear some one ever say
word about Africa"
"Well, that is neither here nor there.
I am authorized to take subscriptions
for the heather, who is running about
in a state of nakedness and sinfulLess,
and who must have bread for his mind
and brought to realize that he should
live for something besides this life"
"Yah, dat is 20, replied the saloon
ist in a reflective tone.
"You contribute whatever sum you
may think best. and I forward it to
Boston by first mail, where it is turned
into Bibles and the Bibles shipped to
Africa. Most people esteem it privi
lege to be allowed to subscribe to this
fund. viii you write your name
DOWN."
81 links will, . replied the man, and
he hunted up his pencil and after much
labor wrote his name on one of the
pages and handed the book back with
the remark:
81 dunno if you can't read it.
"That is all right, but you have neg
lected to mark down the amount of
your contribution. Let's see-will you
say dollar ?"
"Vat?"
"Will you give the sum of one dol
lar for the heather ?"
cha! Vat you spoke about ?"
"Will you give me dollar to for.
ward to the poor, benighted heather ?"
L" Money-gif you money!"
"Yes-for the heather
"Gif you Won dollar"
eyes, a dollar for the benighted race |
who are dwelling in darkness.
The saloon-keeper looked at him for
a half minute, and then, reaching down
for club, said:
"You'd better go out Ply dat door
sign dat pook to get dat heather some
close by de poormaster, and dat is
blenty If you sthay here some little
while more I shall hit you NIT dis Club
on de head !"
Ny dear"
$50 aus NIT dat door " yelled the
saloon keeper, running from behind the
bar, and the canvasser had to co.
Free Press