The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1874-05-14
SAYINGS AND DoINGs.

FUNERAL baked meats are coming into
fashion again.
VmoINIA has Just incorporated % The
Rising Sons of Lignumvitos. They
must be hard lot.
How Patrick proposes to get over hi
single blessedness-by proposing to
! Bridge-it.
A YANKEE wanted the Bridge Of sighs
7 pointed out to him, and then offered 20
bet America had several bridges twice
| the size.
A WEALTHY Italian baron was recently
taken prisoner by party of brigands IN
Sicily, and had to pay SO, 600 ransom
for his release.
A SUBSCRIBER wants TO know If it is
grammatical 10 say " She has a cork
want to tell her so.
A ConoUrTF (Georgia) minister hav-
ing become q father the thirty second
time, a local paper suggests that the boy
benamed ''Call Quit.
SHE tied che halter TO her waist, aud
led the COW to water; the brute took
fright, and gave twist" NY daugh-
ter oh, my daughter !
SEv1zN Sandusky women started out
on a crusade, but meeting lady with
new spring bonnet on, they turned and
gossipped and went home.
THE marriage license of Mr.. jefferson,
the viii of George Washington, and the
viii of Kosciusko have been placed in
the Virginia state library.
THE height OF sbility consists in q
thorough knowledge Of the real value
of things, and of the genius of the age
we live -ROcRefouodUid.
II ever there is a time when man is
justified in changing the subject sudden
IL, it is when his wife asks If he posted
that letter TO mother promptly.
A MARRIED WOMAN of fifty in Dayton,
Nevada, has eloped with youth OF iif-
teen, and Il ian't stated whether she pro-
poses TO be his mother or grandmother.
IF Kentucky man win shoot his best
friend in dispute about q fifty-cent
umbrella. what would he do in case
some one drove his best COW to the
pound?
JENNIE JUNE wants the women TO
wear cork bustles to save themselves
from drowning, but n safer way would
be to strap on g yawl boat and provisions
for three days.
DANIEL GRAVES, an Alabsmian, was
praying in church the other day, when
his revolver went off and shot him in
the leg. There seems to be a moral
here somewhere.
A New York paper says that Vir-
ginia mule is two pegs above New
York coroner in point Of intelligence and
sagaeity, though il doesn't want to hurt
any coroner's feelings.
"HAvE the jury agreed?" asked the
sheriff, as he met q court attache on the
stairs with large pitcher in his hand.
"a Yes, sir they agreed to have half
gallon of beer, and sent me out for It.
AN Iowa judge has decided that it is
more Of n sin to steal a horse than 20
elope with another mans wife. because
there are 5000, 600 woman in the Uni
ted States and only 5000, 600 horses.
WHEE you see a bare-headed man
following a COW through tho front gate,
and filing the air with gorden imple-
ments and profanity, you may know that
his cabbage plants have been set ont.
A WHOLE generation of parents al
ready occupies this mundane sphere who
cannot describe to inquiring childhood
a warming-pEn, ,foot-stove, tinder-box,
a brick-oven, n crane, or q oandle-moid-
Bosros claims to have diamond ring
which once belonged to Sir Isaac New
ton. That is nothing. st. Louis has
the lead pencil with which Noah checked
Of the animals that went into the ark.
THr Bishop Of Manchester has sdecial ed
IN favor Of cremation, AID states that the
Almighty can raise man from the dead
whose body had been burned, just as
sasily as he could raise one whose body
had been buried.
WHEN New Orleans proudly shows
Quebec q shirt front stained with fresh
strawberry Juice, the latter triumphantly
exhibits to New Orleans a sore on the
side of the nose. made by a mosquito Of
this years growth.
-Advices from Little Rock represent
Brooks men as out Of meat. When
hose Arkansas fellows complain Of being
)ut of meat you may rest assured that
he chickens of the neighborhoOd are
.oosting uncommeniy high.
The West Chester (P nnsylvnnia)
News takes a practical view of the Gre
nation question. IL says % With some
people cremation is only q question OF
5ime. If it don't come in this world Il
s sure to come in the next.
THERE is something very sensible in
he impromptu remark of pretty girl
'If our Maker thought il wrong for
Adam to live single when there was not
woman on earth, how eriminaily wrong
ire the old bachelors, with the world
ull OF pretty girls
-Sylvanus thinks il would be = good
hing to say, when the governor blows
I'D and YOU as obstinate as 8 mule:
Like enough. when you have an ass
or a father.b SylvaDus does not mean
% try this himself he has no occasion.
any boy that wants it may have It.
suE entered the omnibus end looked
,round, and said loudly 70 her grand
laughter 50 No seat Well, let's get
ut unless that man viii give me his
-aat Tho nzau tlsdn't do anything ot
ne kiLd. but she sat down, and pulled
wo dreas skirts of the belts and was
iappy
A XXX in the Philadelphia insane
lsylum imagines himself wOman- BE
aresses in female attire and parts his
na:r Ia tho middle. During the day he
associates with the females and does
sewing end embroidery Of TIE finest
lind. He has been reserved for the
centennial
A NEAT reply was made by Minneso-
"a editor to q man who stopped his
paper. giving as one reason that his
wife said fsit won't even clean lhmp-chiEn-
leys." The editor stated that the sub
leriber coald be no gentleman, for he
lad ''no right 70 betTsy what his wife
old him IN cdDndence.
Is the viii Of the late Countess Of
5oudoun, Just proved, her laayship,
,fter desiring that her funeral may be as
Iuiet a. possible, goes OF 20 say
uther wish ray right hand 20 be cut on
.nd burie in the park At Castle Doning-
on AZ the bead of the hill 70 the Trent,
md q small cross or stone over Il with
he motto, i hyde my tyne.
incl waeersd 500 with q young
ady that she eould not refrain from
speaking during an entire week He
escorted the young lady 10 the opera,
5ribed members Of tbs family 10 Try
and eBtrep her, and res0rted 70 various
other expedients fer starting her
tongue, but she won the BET. ana the
editor Of the Sentinel is probably
wiser man on the woman business thnn
be was one week ago.
Az electric light Of new invention has