Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1874-02-20
CONFEDRTT Y ROADS,
(Wich is in the State NV Kentucky,

lWlCl Il IN the state NV kentuckY,) :
February 10, 1874.
1 hev bin anxshusly scannin the polit-
ickle horison thro the telescope Nv hope, |
to diskiver in the sky the bow Nv success. |
thot that at last my faithful search he'd |
bin rewarded. My rainbow was reflected |
onto the clouds Nv the immejit fucher by |
the corrupshens Nv the leaders Nv the Re- |
publikin party and the consekent dissatis- |
fackshun NV the rank and file Nv that |
organizashen. Good we only yoose this |
ez wedge to get that cussed party to |
split, and Good we hook one fackshun |
onto our party, then we shood hev a clean |
majority, and l woodent Civ ten cents to |
be inshoored the Post Offs at the Cor |
ners, which is the alpha and omega NV
my hopes.
] heerd NV one town in Ohio in wich
the Republicans he'd trouble on ther
hands, and, ez an experiment 1 deter
mined to go there and see for myself
whether or no coalishen Good be made
between the Democrisy and the anti.cor-
rupshen Republicans. l argood that eff
it Good be done in one town it Good be
done in a thousand, for human nacher is
the same everywhere.
| broached the idea to Deacon Pogram
(at whose house / hev bin visiting for
three years. and to Bascom, who immeiit-
| ly figgered what the railroad fare would
| be, and they unanimously consented to
advance it, eff l would agree to stay away
two weeks. These men are Citing to be
disgustingly calkelatin.
| But went, and found at New Babylon
! the yoosual state Nv affairs.
There wuz there dozen Dimokrats
who never drank nothin, and who follered
| legitimit biznis Then there wuz the
| tba do
| doggery keepers, the dOggery hunters
| that vast mass to whom clean shirts is only
seen on twict in their lives, viz.:-when
| they are married and when they are buried.
The Dimocrisy wuz in minority Of per-
| haps fifty.
Two years ago the Republicans in Moo
| Babylon had electid two rather scaly fell
lows with whom they he'd he'd trouble.
The auditor and treasurer had been dis
kivered at connivin with contractors, and
the village he'd, between en- all, been
swindled out of about $400 Ez the Re-
publikins had bin cussin the Credit-Mo-
bilier and Back-pay in Congress uphill
and down-dale, Nv course, to be consistent
they he'd to denounce corrupshen at home
with ekal vigor.
Becoz NV the misconduct NV these
offishels, large number of the Republi-
! kins swore that the Republican party had
outliyed its day, and that the time had
come to bust it and make new organiza.
shen, and they called upon wat they wuZ
pleased to call the decent Democrisy to
unite with EN-.
| Thompson, Brown, Jones and Smith,
the decent Democrats Nv the village,
agreed with em, and a Peoples Conven-
shun wuz called to nominate ticket on
the basis Nv reform, wich wuz to be sup
ported by the opponents NV corrupshen,
irrespective Nv party.
1t wuz that convenshun | went TO Moo
Babylon to attend.
The hall wuz crowdid. Immejitly Bill
Rag, wich kept the largest rum-mill in
the village, sprung to his feet and moved
that Lawyer Swipes, his cheefest Gus
toner, be made chairman, which wuz
carried. Then Johnny Tag, which keeps
another dOggery, moved that Saml Bob
tale, his principal customer, be Secretary,
and that the Convention perceed imme-
iitly to nominate a ticket TO be supported
by all the citizen NV New Babylon who
wuz opposed to corrupshen in the present
Administrator in village, State and the
General Government witch moshen wuz
carried
The Reform Republicans tried to git
Squire Broadacres on the ticket for Mayor,
but it woodent work. Rag and Tag he'd
emptied their groseries into that conyen-
shun, and they wuz voted down ten to
one. Lawyer Swipes wuz nominated
with whoOp. Then Sam BObtale wuz
nominated for Treasurer, and Bag hisself
for Recorder, and five Nv the same stripe
up men for Aldermen.
"Good Hevensl" " exclaimed the Reform
Republicans, this aint wat we expected
We can't stand this-yoo can't expect us
to-"
My deer sirs," replied Thompson, one
NV the decent Dimocrats, sit is untortu-
nate, / confess, but yoo see these men
control the majority Nv our vote, and we
RELY can't help ourselves"
"But if you are really for Reform, why
don't you leave a oTsHnizashen wich is
controlled bv sich men? Smikey, the
Republican defaulter is bad enutf, but ez
compared with Bobtale he's an angel Nv
lite. We didn't leave the Republican or
ganizashen, ez bad ez it is, 10 git into a
wuss one We want to git out Nv the
hands of the Sankey's, but we don't want
to drop into the keepin Nv Rag, Tag and
Bobtale. That amt wat we bargained
for, Eff the decent Democrisy can't con-
troll that organizashen, wat kin be done"
"I RELY don't know. Smith, Jones,
Brown and myself moan over the power
welded by these men, but we can't help
it. Five split with tlHm, may lose the
nomenashen for Congress next fall, and
Jones may not go to the Legislacher. We
can't break our party lines-we can't in.
deed"
"Its about the same in Nashnel mat
ters, amt itY" queried the unreasonable
Republican who wuznt satisfied with the
kind NV Reform he wuz gettin. Spozin
we leave the Republican party and jine
the Democrisy? Do we leave Credit