The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1874-11-12
from the virginia. tNev.) Enterprise.


tice Y Young's court room an evening o
1.-TWO since. Two sons of the souIt
sod" full of 'tchain -ifghfning" ant
law, rushed in, and, advancing to tn
Justices little pulpit at the rear of tn
courtroom, both began talking a
once,
"one at a time. if you please" saio
the Judge, '''
'Judge-yer honor-will I shpake
thin?" said one of the emen.
'Silenee !" roared his companion.
81 am here. Let me talk. Phwat de
you know about law ?"
Keep still yourself, sir" said tht
Judge. "Let him say what he wants.
well, want me name aft the pal
per, that's phwat | want, said thu
man.
'Of what paper?" said the judge.
"Well, aft the paiper; ye ought tC
know what paiper. Shure, ye married
me, they say" zastt-sss-s
'.To whom ~ asked the judge. i,
ESome famale, sir. and don't want
her, sir. 1t don't go. and 1 want me
naime off the paiper." as5s,s =ta
sssSilenceI !" rOared the friend, bring
! ing his huge fist down upon the little
pulP1b5- Juob IuoSOo zhOcCl
with tremendous thWack. "Silenee
am here. Phwat do you know about
law? Sure, yer honor, it was Tim
McCIosky's wife he married-his wild
dY, main.l You married them, your
honor" ns as
rAnd l was dhFunk at the time, sir.
Y is, sir, an was not a free aigent, an
| don't know thing about it, sir =
diviI rowst mel want me name aff
the paiper,-I repudiate, sir"
'Silencei Let me speake! PhWat
do you know about law?" bringing
his fist down upon the judges desk.
"DutI was dhrunk; / was not at
the time a free agent" 8fE
'Silence / am here to shpakel 1t
does not depind upon that at all. 1t
depinds--and there is the whole pint,
both in law and equity-it depinds
whether was the woman sole thra-
der or not at the time this marriage
was soIemnlzed. That is the pint
both in law and equity l"
Il was dhrunk at the time. Divil
roaWst me if i knoWed l was yettin
married was not a free agent. L
want the judge TO talk me name aft
the paiper. 1t won't co." slasss
The Judge tried to explain to the
man that, drunk or sober, he was
married to the woman fast enough,
and if he wanted a divorce he must go
to another court. sl1g5
"DiYil burn me- cried the man, off
go to another court. Ye married
me and We can nnmarry me. Talk me
sIlame aft the paiper.p u
t,SiIenee!Y cried the friend. bringing
1 :. \ -, 81 q ho
Judges nose. i"PhWat do you know
about the law? / admit judge, that
he must go TO a higher court; that is,
down comes the fist If the woman
can prove (Whack) that she was at the
time the marriage was Solemnated
(whaek) a regularly =oHdainehH sole
tIrader (whack), On this point it de-
pinds, both in law and equity tssz
II have had enough.zofit thisI" cried
the Judge: Il cannot divorce you.-
You are married > and married you
must remain, for all ! can do" 5t.s
: tl''Ye won't talk my name aft the
paiper,, thenI" . 5=i.eu za
'fIt would not mend the NATTER"
said the judge.
f., aye won't talk it aff?" 7ut.s. tH~s
s.No; l wontl" fairly yelled the
judge. sss
"Silence |" cried the partner, bring
ing down his fist and raising cloud
of dust under the judges nose. sit
depinds, whether, at the time, the wo-
man was a regular sole"
"Get out OF here cried the JUICE.
."I've had about enough of thisIY at
the same time rising. -Tssg
.s '.'Ye won't take it aft? Very well,
thin, I'll go hoam and divorce meself.
DiviI roawst me, I'll fire the thatch /;
will .tf
Here he glanced towards the front
door; his under jaw dropped, he
ceased speaking, and in half-stooP-
ing posture he went out of the back
door like a shot.
The valiant friend and legal adviser
also glanced toward the door, when
he, too, doubled up, and scoOted in
the footsteps of his illustriOus princ.-
pal. szta5=Is
A-Iook at the door showed it dark
ened by a woman about ak feet in
height, and so broad as to fill it almost
from side to side.
The Judge took a look at this noun
tain of aeeh, doubled up and was
about to take the back track, but
thought better of it and took refuge
behind his little law desk,
The mountain advanced, gave utter
anee in sort of internal rumble, and
then, amid fire, smoke, and burning
lava, belGhed out; ta
tDid or did I not see Michael
O'HOolahan sneak out of your back
door?"
II believe O'Hoolahan is the name
of one of the gentlemen that just went
out" said the judge.
Advancing upon the pulpit, behind
which the judge settled lower and
lower, the mountain belched: "You
be-e-lavel You know iE was Michael
O'Hoolahani Now, what is all this
about? Am / wildly agin ?
Did ye talk his name aft the pAiper? /?
Did We talk it aff2D s'141 = - .iftts5.
asN!no.D said the Judge. aeiljh3a u
0"Ye didn't? Don't ye decave me-"
"No; give you my word and hon
or / ;didn't.-I had no right. - 1T tt'a
"It's ell inry ye ye didn't III tach
him to be cOnniVin' to lave me q wild
dy again, whin Pm maxim a jintleman
of hinl.".-,a raitl o. ssi5.ts''si 1'ii =. -
With this she sailed back to the
door, where she turned, and shaking
her fist, thus addressed the tip of the
judges nose, which alone was visible
above the little black pulpit: "Now,
do We mind that We lave his name on
the paiper. want no meddlin' wild
a man, wanst / git him. No more
DON'T be ashamed of your plain
clothes young man, provided you
have earned them. They are far
more beautiful in the estimation OF
all honest men and women than the