Litchfield enquirer., 1874-01-22
From the Springfield Republican. A MARRIED MAN:
Or How the SchooI-CommitteeW Was
 OutWitted.

'What shall do?"
 Ralph Willett looked the picture of dis pair as he walked into the office of his friend, Bob Ayres, and launched the afore- said question at him. -
 "Why, what's the trouble now?" and good natured Bob. 8 young lawyer who had just hung out his shingle, shut up the musty volume of legal lore over which he had been boring and gave his attention to Ralphs grievance.
 "'It's just this" and Ralph opened his clinched hand, disclosing letter crushed into a thousand dispairing wrinkles. Here's my answer from the trustees of Monroe academy; they're satisfied with my recommendations, and my references appear unexceptionable, but on one point they are strenuous-they will employ none but married man"
 .'Pshaw!" blurted out Bob.
 ''Hear what they say: Only one ques- ton remains to be affirmatively answered by you before we close in with your terms: Are you a married man? You may think the question strange one, but we have had so much trouble in the past with pre- ceptors who, after the first few weeks, de- voted themselves mainly to flirting. that we have passed a resolution as unalterable as the law of the Medes and Persians, that we will employ none but married men. If you can suit us in that respect, our contract may be considered closed. Let us hear from you at once in regard to that particular, and we hope you are pre- pared to meet our requirments, as we confess ourselves strongly predisposed in you favor. Yours truly, WILLIAM PE- TIERS, Sec. of the Board of Trustees.'"
 'Let 'em go," said Bob, as Ralph fin ished reading, and glanced up at him. ''There are other academies in the world, and not all blessed with such an old-maid board of trustees"
 ''But it is getting late in the season, and twill soon be impossible to engage Q place for the coming year. The opening seems to be fine one, but it's hard case if must be married, nolens volens, in or der to teach"
 'sI don't suppose, unused Bob, "that it would be of any use for me to write them a voucher for your unexceptionable morals and anti flirting principles?"
 Ralph shook hls head with smile. There was moments silence.
 ''I tell you what" burst forth Bob, ''here'smy advice to you as friend and 8 lawyer, and no fee wanted either; make lem think you are Q married man; you can convey the impression without saying it in so many words, if that will ease your conscience" .t.s
 "Bob Ayres! you're crazy!"
 'No-iust look here" and Bob ran over nasty plan of arrangements "Upon my word, it's easily done, and the idea grows better and better"
 Ralph was in Q mood to clutch at any thing, just then, for teaching was his cho- sen vocation, and he felt in honor bound to support his widowed mother in easy comfort. Before half an hour he had so far fallen in with Bob's absurd proposi- ton as to write, with his assistance a re- sponse to the board of trustees. Here is the clause which most interests us:
 Fortunately for me, your one impor- tant requirement. is not at all an impossi- ble one in my case. shall not, however, bring Mrs. Willett to Monroe with me at present. as she does not like boarding, and it IS hardly worth the while to set up house keeping there when am only en- gagged for year, and we have g good home here. It seems best, on the whole, that she should remain here among her friends for the present, so you will please engage board for me alone in some qui- ct family near the academy"
 "There," said Bob, triumphantly. ''even Mrs. might be satisfied with that for there IS Mrs. Ralph Willett of whom all you say is true, but she is your moth CT. and not your wife"
 'tTt's dangerous game, fear," said Ralph, closing and sealing the letter, ..but believe my intentions are good. If they find me out I shall probably suf- fer."
 ''They will not be apt to find out the facts at this distance, but if they do, they l won. hang you, my boy. should put in 8 plea of self defense if had to defend the case.
 "I shall saddle all the blame that oc- CUTS on to you. for I should never have thought of such thing myself My shoulders are broad, laughed Bob, sand lawyers are generally supposed to be inconigible sinners. you know Bat never fear; the crime is. not 8 great one. Going into strange place and palming onessef-of as single man when one is Z ss4