The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-03-21
NEW NOR WEsTERs.


Rooted sorrow-An aching tooth.
Cure for felon-The penitentiary.
: The Oranges of Iowa are quarreiing.
Indiana rejoices in a "Wild Cat
Grange
The o. /. G. Club contemplate dried
peach festival.
The comforting of hew hats is the Car
dinal idea in Rome just now.
Gen. Sheridan never had cook-stove
named after him until this year.
After May 1st, the Astor House, New
York, ceases to be kept as hotel
Professor, WincheIl has discovered q
new planet.-Er. What did he slip on?
The Oxford, Me-, Democrat gives a
dish-lifter as an inducement to subscribers.
The Boston Post records an entire abb
sence Of sunstrokes for the month Of De-
cember.
There are at present 100000 worth Of
| thoroughbreds on the Nashville course under
training.
A Chicago clergyman preached in a
billiard saloon on Sunday. He made but
three points.
The Tichborne Claimant has already
cost the Government of England the small
sum of 80, 500, 900.
The placidity of expression worn by a
man who is ''Next'' in full barber shop
cannot be counterfeited.
Opposing the Centennial is like turning
back the hands of clock to save time. 1t
is bound to come.--Boston Post.
Sir Samuel Baker believes the influence
of one steamer in the center of Africa is
equal to that of a hundred missionaries.
--Jupiter's moons can now be seen by the
aid of strong opera-glass. Jupiter him.
self can see them without any glass at all.
The great difference between Byron
and Burns in early youth was that the one
was Harrow boy and the other plowboy.
"A boy was caught stealing chestnuts
near cemetery. "What's your name p
"Tweed," blubbered the boy. The fright
ened farmer dropped the delinquent boy
and fed.
Poor Prince Bill, King Lunalillo l.,
died just ten pays after the arrival Of the
first barrel of Cincinnati whisky at Hawaii.
He is the first stranger who ever survived
over twelve hours,
This is the last day of winter, and to-
morrow comes spring-the dear, blessed
spring, with its smiling skies, blossoming
flowers, carrolling birds and pains in the
chest.-Danbary Neaos.
A reporter on an iowa paper wrote
Yesterday morning, winter and spring
kissed each other IN the sunrise, and each
spread It's choicest FAVOR on the purple air.
He was married next day.
AS Tweed was sitting with his fellow
convicts at dinner, some of the ceiling of
the room suddenly fell. The ex-Boss looked
up and jokingly observed, "That must be
some of Garvey's plastering."
-Charles.fV of Spain said: eff / knew
every language would speak Spanish to
God, italian to wife or sweetheart, French
to my friend, English to my bird, German
to my horse, and Hungarian to the Devil"
They're singing these lines, in Ohio,
now:
Rouse thee! despondent brother.
Cheer with hope these days of pain;
When this whisky war is over,
Wen, we'll get drunk again.
-Galyanism was discovered by man
named Swammerdamm, 1870 years before
Galvani called attention to it. The world,
however will not willingly change the name
in order to give him the honor belonging to
him. Swammerdammism would be awful.
-" IF you don't see what you want, ask
for it, . is posted up in conspicuous place
in Longansport grocery. A native step
ped into the establishment last week. He
saw the card and remarked: 81 want a
ten-dollar bill, and don't see it, @Nei-
ther do T. was the laconic reply.
/ A young poet i'll the Western States
sent to the local paper a love-poem begin
| ming:
ReVeel, begg. the madgic spell
The editor answered that if he liked to call
at the Office he should have the spell of the
dictionary there for few hours.
1t is said that, during one days health
full existence, sixty hogsheads of pure air
should enter the human lungs And yet
we don't suppose one man in a thousand
measures the air he breathes to ascertain if
he takes in sixty llogsheads per day. More
attention should be given this matter.
A gentleman who has penetrated the
eastern end of Wetzel county, West Vir-
ginia, describes a section of about thirty
square miles where newspaper, secular or
| religious, never finds its way. The mud
| and log shanties contain from eight to ten
children each, and there was one family Of
fifteen persons. Indian meal, he says, is
the chief article of food.
During Colonel Tom Scott's recent Wis
| it to St. Louis he was hailed on the street
| by little boot black with, ssBoss, have
your boots shined p The Colonel pleas
antly shook his finger at him, saying, "My
boy, am no boss" The little waif swung
his box over his shoulder, and, cycling the
great railroad king from head to foot, re-
/ piled: 6 Yon're boss Of yonr boots amt
yer?''
TIE Boy WHO WANTED TO KNow.-The
following is strictly true. A lady coming
! to this State recently, stopped at one Of the
Chicago Hotels with her son. The boy was
not perfectly satisfied with matters and
things at the dinner table, and expressed
himself frequently to that effect The
mother finally arose, and remarked in an
undertone to the youthful offender: ssCome