The Valley Virginian. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1865-1895, 1874-08-13


a STROLL WITH A CANDIDATE The cam
paign Is coming on. lii fact it is already here.
y campaign is SOMETHING that makes candt-
Gates plenty. It makes drink cheap, too, and
everybody but the candidates. You have
al seen candidate and know how he books
Ihe TACT is, you can't see much else at this sea-
son OF the year.
But the Americans are 4 patriotic race
Nlnety-nine out Of every hundred OF them VIII
give up situation worth ST. 600 a year, to take
an Office worth 50, 900, and think he has done a
big thing It is SO gentesl to be servant OF
the State at Jefferson City or in Washington.
ny the way, let us draw a distinction. There
are two great public buildings at jefferson City,
both OF which are set apart for the servants OF
the State. In one case the servants are nomi-
mated by convention and elected by major
lty In the other case they are nominated by
grand and elected by petit jury. There is
great deal Of difference in the service render
ed by these two classes of servants of the State,
but sometimes there is not as much difference
between the two classes of servants as there
ought to be.
But to resume. 1.-bout every other man You
meet nowadays is a candidate You can al
ways tell him when you see him, by the benev-
client look on his face Well, one of the intel
ASSUlt0l C1iAoA ASPoAoSA "
the Republican, met a candidate yesterday
Walked with him around two squares. It was
a terrible ordeal.
Did you ever walk with candidate at this
season Of the year, aad if SO, how did you get
home? Probably IN handcart. But maybe
in wheelbarrow. If you never did, don't try
it. It is not good for the liver.
at the corner Of fourth and Chestnut. He was
talking with saloon keeper III the third Ward.
The saloon keeper is hard case, and his place
is resort for the b'hoys But candidate held
him affectionately by one hand, and was pat
ting him Familiarity on the shoulder with the
other. The saloon keeper had the best of it,
and he very well knew it. So he let his hat
slide gently down over his west eye and shrug-
ged up his east shoulder. as much as to say he
was a kind Of a king pin in the political apple
cart. f-.s
Something was said about Kings. The can
didate said it, of course, for he was doing all
the talking. So Kings it was. When we had
gone about ten steps we met asomeWhat dilap-
dated Irishman.
by both hands. The intellectual agent has
known this candidate for a space of four years,
| and this was the first time he ever heard him
speak with a brogue. But there it was, as I'M
mistakable as Tipperary.
ssNever knew that / was an Irishman before !!
Why, the Lord bless you, I've always been
an Irishman.''
J CAV coorse hez an Irishman.'
| Then there was brief season OF whispered
confidence and the advance upon Kings was
resumed with re-enforcements. By the time
we got there we had picked up seven recruits.
| They were a hard setr-all but the candidate
| ard the intellectual. Then went out. and on
down the street: Met two more Irishmen.-
| They were old friends OF our candidate. Had
known him sixteen years; knew him in the old
| country. More drinks-of course. This time
! it was the Hole-in-the-W Then went out
| on the sidewalk and met more constituents
The constituents thirsty soul, particularly
/ at this season of the year, Still more drinks.
| Then we started for Olive street. Between
! Pine and Olive met thirteen nstituents. Can
didate shook hands with all OF them, patted 8
| Of them on the back, took Of them to one side
! for confidential talk, and loaned one OF them
half-a-dollar AT the corner OF fourth and Ol-
| i've met three more constituents; shook hands
with them, and said something about going
| down to ward Third; started down, and on the
way picked up five recruits. 1t is amazing to
| think how many constituents it takes to make
one office-holler. This time it was beer. Then
more beer. Finally more beer. 1t requires
| great deal of beer to create the same amount
| of patriotic fervor THAT can be evolved from a
small quantity of whiskey. It would never Go
for candidate for any important office, with
large constituency, to depend on beer. He
would burst before the campaign was half over.
| Beer is undoubtedly healthier for the constitu-
ent than whiskey, but would be death to the
candidate.
| Recapitulation- Walked around two blocks !;
met thirsty constituents treated eight Of them
to wliskey had confidential talks with seven !;
Inquired after the families of nine; beered nine;
loaned half dollar to one. And the conyen-
ton is not even called yet.-St. Louis Repu6-
| Ncaqa.