davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
A sTAMMERING WIFE.
BY JOHN g. SAGE.

When deeply in love with Miss Emily Payne,
vowed, if the lady would only be mine,
would always endcavor 80 please her
She blushed her consent, though the suffering
lass
Said never word, except you're an ass
An assam ass-iduous tcaser.'
But when We were married, found my Ruth
The stammcring lady had spoken the truth
For often, in oblivious dudgeOn,
She'd say, if ! ycntured to give her "A jog,
In the way of reproof, "Yourc a dog-dog-dog-
dog-a dog-matic carmudgeon."
And once, when ! said, ave can hardly afford
This cXtravagant style with our moderate board,
And limited we ought to be wiser;
She looked, assure you, exceedingly blue,
And fretfuly cried, YOU'RE n Jew-Jcw---Jcw-
very ju-dcious advisor"
Out of temper, at last, with this insolct dame,
And feeling the woman was greatly to blame
To scod inc instead Of caressing,
| mimicked her speech, like churl that | am,
And angriIy said, YOU'RE dam--dam-
-dam-age instead of a blessing"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

you SO you won't never notch another razo
for me-
And he cut budding limb and dressed
that boy down until the youth saw stars
That night Christopher Columbus resolved
never to tell the truth again unless BY acct
dent, and through life he stuck close 10 tina
resolution.
When the lad was about IL years Of age 1t
read little book that honesty was the bes
policy" He didn't more than half believe
it, but he thought he'd try. H. went tn being
honest. One day his mother sent him TO the
grocer TO buy eggs, and Bill Jones induced
him to squander the money in the purchase 81
soda water. When he got home his mother
asked him for the little balance, and Christie
pher explained.
Spent it for soda, ell - she replied Here
your poor mother is working like slave
and you are around swillng down soda wa
ter. don't think you'll swiIi any more,
don't. Come over my right knee"
AND SHE AGITATED HIN
in the livcliest manner That night a. AC
turned on his downy straw bed the boy made
up his mind that honesty did not pay and he
resolved to cheat the whole world ii he only
could.
When Christopher was halfa year older be
came dCIOSS INC nc hlht ~ liIt
poor" He did rot know whether it would
pay or not, but he set about it. He knew OF
poor woman who sadly needed q spring
bonnet, and he took over his Mothers along
with few other things, including his faith
er's second pair OF boots, his own Sdnday
shoes, and so on. He went around feeling
very bighcartcd until the old gent wanted to
90 to the lodge one night, and then it came
out. "Gin away my boots eh y inquired his
father; "lugged your mothers best bonnet
off, ell? Well don't think you'll remember
the poor much after tonight"
AND HE POUNDED CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS
with pump handle until the boy tainted
away, and even then didn't feel as though he
had made Il thorough job of it.
They fooled this boy once more. He heard
a rich man say that everybody should make
hay while the sun shonc." So when there
came sunny day the boy went ont, took his
tathcr's scythc down from the plum tree and
went to making hay. He broke the scythc
cut the tulips and hacked his sister in the
heel, and his mother came out and lead him
around by the hair, and bounced him until
he went into Il decline. They couldn't BAN
boozlc this boy after that He grew wicked
every day of his life, and before his eigh.
tcenth birthday arrived he was hung for mur
der He sad he didn't care a huCkleberry
about it, and died without making the usual
4ti Of July Grafton
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
To ARREST Observation-Disclosures

TO ARREST HYDROPHOBIA.-lmmc
upon person being bitten by a dog, sup
posed to be mad or not, battle the part OF
parts in WHITEWATER of natural temperature
in other words, cold water Battle the parts
the same day and for several days, holding
the parts in the water, and occasionally NOV.
ing them about in the water. if the parts
bitten are so situated that they cannot be
placed in water, take cotton cloth and satu-
rate 1t with water, and apply it to the parts,
frequently rInsing the cloth and re-stuating
and applying it. Do this as before directed,
repeatedly through the day, and for several
days, until all the soreness of the wound dis
appears.
When tho poison has produced It's effects
upon those who have used the remedy and
they are seized with hvdrophObia, then let
two strong men hold the patient, one at each
shoulder, and let muscular man take an or
binary household water-bucket holding two
or three gallons OF water. and throw it with
great force directly into the face of the pa
tient; do this three times, with an intermls.
sion of not more than two or three seconds,
merely time enough for the patient to collect
his thoughts, but not long enough to allow
the force OF the disease or paroXysm to re-
turn. Repeat the treatment as often as the
paroXysms return. The theory is this: The
disease may be largely nervous. That the
nervous system is deeply involved Is evidenc.
ed from the paroxysms produced by the sight
of water. There is some peculiar force,
power, or influence that controls the nervous
system. We know, fiom experiments, that
sudden shocks have powerful influence in al
tering the action of the system in It's more
impenetrable operations. This application
OF, or shock by water, is force against force
"a counteracting force, and of the very thing,
the sight Of which produces the etfecting
force, or aggrivates the affecting force The
patient sees that what he so much dreaded in
sight, when it is thrown upon him, does HIM
no harm, and this IN connection with the con.
nection with the powerful influence of the
mind over the system, produces a re.adust
ment of the deranged parts-Erehonge.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

WHY EARS SHOULD NOT De BoXED.-In
Physiology for Practical Use d. Appleton &
Coz we find the following: There are sew.
eral things very commonly done which are
extremely injurious to the ear and ought to
be carefully avoided. ....... And first, chill
dren's ears ought never to be boxed. We
have seen that the passage of the ear is clos
ed by thin membrane, especially that adapt
ed to be influenced by every impulse of the
air, and with nothing but the air to support
itintcrnally. What, then, can be more like.
ly to injurc this membrane than sudden
and forciblc compression OF the mir in front
OF it: If any one designed to break or over
stretch the membrane he could scarcely de
wise more efficient means than to bring the
hand suddenly aud fJrcibly down upcn the
passage of the ear, thus driving the air vlo-
lently before it, with no possibility for its es-
cape but by the membrane giving way. Many
children are made deaf by boxes on the ear
in this way"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

CHEESE FRITTERs.-Put about a pint OF
water into saucepan with piece of butter
the size of an egg, the least bit of cayenne
and plenty of black pepper. When the
water boilS throw into 1t sufficient flour to
form thick paste; then take it off the fire
and work into 1t about quarter of pound
of grated Parmesan cheese and the yolks OF
three or four eggs and the whites of two
beaten up to troth. Let the paste rest for a
couple of hours and then proceed to fry by
dropping pieces of it the size of walnut
into plenty of hot lard Serve sprlnkled with
very fine salt
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
THE SCIENTIAr AND HIS CHILD.

"Father, thou art scientist,
Therefore dost all things know
"My child, if you've a dollar left,
You 20 and bet it's So"
Father, is there an ether
Through which the worlds all whiz"
"Opinions vary, good my child;
think, perhaps, there is"
And, father, are there folks who dwell
In yon bright twinkling STAR"
Proctor thinks so, my dearest hoy,
And-well perhaps there are
Sand, father, that there comet there
You know what It's, l hopc"
" i guess tits carbon, boy; so says
Your daddys spectroscope.'
sand, father, while think of it,,
How do you know you know"
knowledge is relative, my child
! only think It's So"
You think you know you know you think
Pray how can such things bey
My child thus certainty you find
Across your parents knee"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

oh Lord. Thou knowcst,' prayed a Con
necticut deacon in church meeting, that am
afflicted with the most impious and depraved
son. Thou knowest that he will swear and
steal, and do all sinful things. Thou know
est on the last Sabbath day he was seen walk
ing down the principal street in the village
with his hands in his pockets, whistling the
following ungodly tune"-And the congrega
ton were astounded to hear Yankee Doodle
flow melodiously from the deacon's purscd
UP lips.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
HERES RICHNESS"
The Troubles of Christopher Columbus Me
Pherson-How a Good 10y was spoiled,
IIOilI'S.

The Troubles of Christopher Columbus Me-
rherson How aGood hoy was spoiled,
THIS was good boy lie would have been
an angel to-day but for the deceit of this false
hearted world He wasn't one OF SET of
triplets, and, therefore, didn't have honors
Showered down on him in his early days, but
old women said there was II foundation there
for an orator, a great general or n philosopher,
and old men examined his head and said il
was level Nothing particular happened to
Christopher Columbus until the Sih year of
his reign. His childhood days were ,ul of
mud PIES, the bntt ends of shingles, paregoric,
castor-oil, and old straw hats with the front
brim worn off. He was deep thiHkcr and
a close observer for q small boy, and he was
just innocent enough 10 believe things which
other boys pitch out of the window without II
second thought
When Christopher was going on o years
old, he heard some one say that penny
saved was two pence earned" He therefore
laid a big Bungtown away in Il crack under
the mop.board, and every day he looked To
see Ii grow to two cents. He had confidence
and patience, but at length both gave way.
Then he got the cent out one day, and Mrs.
\ orton's baby swallowed il, and that was the
last of that Bungtown. The youthful Chris
topher did not believe in maNims quite as
much rs before, but he hadn't cut all his eye
teeth yet
When this boy was year older he heard
il SAID that truth is mighty and must pre-
vail" and that boy who always spoke the
truth would surely become great aud good
man. He commenced To tell the trnth. One
day he got his fathers best razor out and
hacked it on stone, and when the old gent
came home he asked
WHO IN ri AZFs HAD DONE THAT
Christopher Columbus spoke up and said
at was | done IL, father-I no'cked your
old razor"
you cid, eli" sneered the OLD man, as he
locked up into the peach tIee; well I'll fix
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
THE MOUNTAIN AND THE SQUIRREL

The mountain and the squirrel
Had q quarrel.
And the latter called the former Little Prig.
Bun replied
" You are doubtless very big;
But all sorts of things and weather
Must be taken in together
To make up the year,
And a sphere;
And think it 10 disgrace
To occupy my place.
If Pm not so large rs you,
You are not so small as !,
And not half 50 spry;
I'll not deny you make
very pretty squirre.track.
Talents differ; all is well and wisely put:
III cannot carry forests on my back,
Neither can you crack nut.n-Emejxoh.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
A LEAvENwoRTH WEDDlNG.-A wcdC

n LEAvENwoRTH WEDDING.-A wedding
which deeply interested Two youthful resi-
dents of Leayenworth, Kan, is thus chroni
clcd by the Commercial of that city: He
was Is and she sweet sixteen; his father was
memorable, So, after raising the wind to the
extent OF 80, he, she, and her mother, with a
mutual friend, boarded the cars for the friend
~ glens OF Missouri. After paying fare for
the round trip and $3.50 TO the parson, the
twain, made one landed in Leavenworth with
the large fortune OF Sl.00 in greenbacks, Re
pairing to a saloon, ice cream and cake was
set up, reducing the cash To two nickels.
Nothing daunted, two glasses OF soda were
called for, and the cwly-married couple
started to begin life's welded dream without
copper"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

No HARD TIMEs.-A gentleman writing
from San Francisco says:
california has never been in such state
of prosperity rs at the present time. The
harvest promises to be the largest ever gath
cred III the state, and mining operations of
all kinds are giving vast amounts of gold,
silver, lead and quicksilver The fruit crop
IS equally abundant. The markets are full of
cherries and strawberries, and the grape crop
is equally promising"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

REM>RkABLE SURGICAL OPERATIoN.--On
Tuesday last Mr.. w. ii. Fraser performed The
rarely attempted surgical operation known
as TRANSMISSION of blood. The patient was Mr.
Alfred Foote, of the well known firm OF
Foote X Drummer, iron founders of Peru
The blood was taken from the arms of Miss
Salie Gray ana Mr.. Jeffrey Martin, both
young and healthy, and infused through Mr..
Foote'S arm at the usual place OF blood let
ting. The instrument through which IT was
transmitted was a siphon, improvised for the
occasion, composed OF glass tubes and gutta
percha pipe. The quantity transmitted was
supposed to be about sixteen ounces, and the
operation occupied ten minutes, Meantime
the pulse WAS reduced from l20 To 100 and
greatly improved in tone. Mr.. Footc was
much revived by the operation, but rs so far
gone with consumption that little hope of his
recovery is cntcrtained.-L0 Sale Press.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

To Cook Eggs Ia Bonnie Femmc-slcc ar
onion, fry it in butter to a light brown, add q
teaspoonful of vinegar; butter dish, spread
the onion and vinegar over it, break the eggs
into it and then put the dish into the oven
when the eggs are done strew fried bread
crumbs over them and serve very hot.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

In a conference meeting on u recent sun
day evening in IA Congregational church moi
far from Worcester, a colored brother rose to
pray, but before that exercise he INDUCED in
brief preliminary remarks, as follows:
Brothers and sisters, 1t don't do me BIT
of good TO hear any of you speak or pray; |
feel rs though must do it myself, for, you
know, as our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ
said, every tub must stand on Its own bot
TOM
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01
FIsurISG GRAssuoppERs.-A WI

FIGHTING GRAsSHOPPERs-A Wright cor
respondent of the Inie1 .Ocean furnishes plar
Tor battling the grasshoppers. He says
For the past month the people in this Coun
ty have been living in "A state verging be
tween hope and fear, on account of the grass
hOppers While we sincerely hoped that the
pests would not visit us, we greatly feared
they would. For several weeks we have been
hearing reports Of terrible ravages they were
making in the counties to the west and north
ives; OF us and of course we cannot but help
exhibit considerable anxiety. The DAYS
were counted and people would say, if they
would only stay away for two weeks we shall
be all right, Then it came down TO twelve
days, next to ten, then TO eight, and finally
people begun to be more hopeful and said
there would be no grasshoppers at all. This
was the state Of the people when all at once
something like cloud swept over the sun,
aud down they came in countless billions. If
the CRY of THE Greek the Greek! they
come struck CONSERVATION in the camp of
the Turks, that of "the graSshoppers" made
the people in this locality look rather blue
The grasshoppers were not allowed to have
1t their own way, and if they had to lose their
crops they were determined not to let them
go without Il struggle No sooner had the
curses taken their position in the fields than
old straw piles were hauled out and immedi-
ately set on fire, and on this was thrown green
grass which created Il dense smoke, and as
the wind swept this through and over the
grain fields the graSshoppers, with noise ie-
scmblng distant thunder, would rise in clouds
ascend above the smoke, and sorr away for
other parts. | believe this is the first county
that has tried the experiment of smoking the
pests, and this is to be attributed the saving
of their crops
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-08-01

oh, grandma cried a mischievous LITTLE
urchin, Il cheatecd the hens 50 nicely jus
now. | threw them your golC beads, ant
they thought they were corn, and ate them NJ
as las, rs they could"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07

Sleary and her associates, in "Hard Times" !"
and she certainly earns larger salary in a
week than the lady who married the celebra.
ted E. W. B. Childers did in year. The re-.
porter describes her as "a young and pretty
girl, with an innocent, artless manner, but
with quiet consciousness that she is able to
take care of herself dressed very elegantly
in black velvet basque and silk dress made
in the finest style, and with very little jewelry
about her." She is the daughter of celebra-
ted circus rider who was formerly the leading
attraction at Astley's; receives one hundred
and fifty dollars week; in nineteen months
has only fallen from her horse twice; had her
arm broke in two places long ago, by a fall !;
designs all her own costumes; and thinks
that French female riders as class have the
most reckless abandon, but English women
most endurance The reporter inquired wheth-
er circus people have any religious feeling"
and was told in reply that jumping through
hoops did not prevent her from trying to
do good, and that she was member of a
church and in good standing.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07
The Aurkrille &nqnirer,
YORKVILLE, S. c.:
THURSDAY MORNING, MAY 7, 1874.

Howto Order the Enquirer.-Write the name
of the subscriber very. plainly, give post-oilice
county and State in full, and send the amount OF
order, or enclose the money in registered letter
Postage.-The postage on the ENQUIRER, to
any part of the United States, is FIVE CENTS pei
quarter, or TWENTY CENTS peryear, and is payable
in advance at the post office where the paper is re-
ceived.
Watch the Figures.-The date on the "address.
label' shows the time to which the subscription is
paid. If subscribers do not wish their papers dis
continued, the date must be kept us advance.
Cash.-It must be distinctly understood thai
our terms for subscription, advertising and job
work, are cash in advance
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07
LOCAL AFT AIRS.
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

r. S. Jefferys Secretary Masonic Meeting.
j. II. ClawsOn AsSignee-In NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
to the Lien Creditors in the matter of Jona-
than L. Sutton, James S. McSwain, j. Nj.
Smarr, Hamilton Wilson, Bankrupts.
Wittkowsky e Rintels Circular for May 1874
S. J. Springs, Sole Exerltrx Of last will of K. A.
Springs-Notice to Creditors and Debtors.
r.. G.. dunlap, Agent-Bureaux- -Washstands-
Walnut Bedsteads- Provision Safes-Spring
Beds-Lounges-Falin ling i I.eaf 'lables-Mat-
tresses-Cooking Stoves.
NJ. Strauss q Son-Cheap Dress Goods-Spring
and Summer Clothng-Hats-Great In
tlucement-ShoeS.
r.. NJ. Dobson & Co.. 30 Days-Coffce and Sugar
Buggy Whips-Andirons-- Goods
Millinery St0re-Bleached Shirting-Para-
sols-Bcd Ticking s-Shoes--Suspen-
ders-Cash Boxes.
John G. Kuykenkal-Specia Inducements-Call
for It--Iactopeptine-l0,0 600 Wanted-Sure
Pop.
DR.. John May, Agent-Pure Drugs and Medi-
cineS.
T. w. Clawson, Deputy Messenger-In Bank
ruptcy-Application for Discharge-1n the
matter of j. &. Coan-A. Sylvanus Wallace,
A. M. Peden.
John G. Enloe, Auditor, York county-Deln-
quent Land Sales.
Joseph NJ. Whitesides -Strayod or Stolen.
r. Fl. Glenn, S. Y. C.-Sheriff s Sales.
T. w. Clawson, Deputy Messcnger-In Bank
ruptcy-Frst Meeting Of Creditors-1n the
Matter of Elijah Landlord. James N. Nc
Call, S. NJ. Pegg and Cynthia j. Roberts.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07

ried Chicago lady, by whom he has two
children. He entered the United States Ar
my in 1857, and was the private secretary of
Albert Sydney johnson in the Utah expedi-
ton. He served in the United States Army
during the late war and attained the rank of
Brevet Colonel, and was Senior Captain in his
regiment. Hisremains will be embalned and
taken to Philadelphia for nterment.
By the regular order of promotion, we learn
the command of the company at this place
will devolve upon Lieut.. j. K. Hyer, who is
the senior first lieutenant of the regiment to
which Capt. Christopher WIS attached. Lieut..
Hyer is now stationed at Columbia. =
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07
COUNTY COMMISSIONERS.

There will be no meeting of the Board Of
County Commissioners until Monday, the
l1th instant. Hereafter the regular meetings
of the Board will be held on Monday and
Tuesday of each weekiinstead of Fridays
and Saturdays as heretofore. Persons who
may have business with the Board should
bear this in mind.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07
RECENT DEATHS.

On Thursday morning last, Mr.. R. Springs
Moore died in this place, aged about sixty
years. Mr.. Moore had been citizen of
Yorkville for the past thirty-nine years, dur
nearly all of which time up to the commence
ment of the war, he was engaged in mercan-
tile pursuits
On Saturday last, Mrs. Harriet Bratton,
relct of the late DR.. John S. Bratton, died at
her residence at Brattonsville, in this county,
at the advanced age of eighty.two years.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1874-05-07

willreceive prompt attention, and satisfaction
as to quality of work, guaranteed in every
instance. Particular attention given to fine
work in colors.