American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1874-05-09
UNDER THE SEAT,

SMOKING -CARRIAGa, sir?" asked ii
tip expecting porter, as he bore my rug
and minor packages along the platform
/ said yes, and he made me comfortab l
and received his sixpence. Then til
guard came to look after my well being
but got nothing more than innocen
gratitude, which was perhaps all he de
sired / have no doubt that / did hin
injustice in attributing his efforts to intro
duce Il tat old gentleman with a cough,
lean old gentleman who was snuffy, aDt
mlddle-aged gentleman who was envel
oped IN wraps, the lower part of who's,
face was covered up like female Turk s
an evident window-shu to enter IN,
carriage, in order to spite me-
Duty to his employers alone made hin
endeavor to fill up, but the British anx
lety to get as much room as possible fol
my money WAS strong within me- ant
stirred uncharltable suspicious.
You may lead horse to the water, ol
an anti-nicotinian old gentleman to &
smoking carriage, but you can't make
him get in; and when each in turn pu
his head into my compartment he jibbed
for some late occupants of it had been
cigar, not pipe, smokers, and it was
rather strong So L was apparently left
alone-alone with the Times and all the
comic weeklies and a modern poem.
The doors were banged, the engine
whistled, the train began to move. 1t
would not stop again till we got to Peter
borough, SO that was safe to be undis-
turbed so far. There were six seats and
! could occupy as many of them as a linn
tied number of members permitted.
almost wished myself an Octopus, to take
full advantage of the situation Calming
down, l hung up my hat, put on a gaudy
piece of needlework won in a bazaar
ratfie, lit my pipe, cut my papers, and be-
gan to enjoy myself.
l sat in the lefthand corner, with my
back to the engine, absorbed in in a big
lawsuit 1t is great fun to read a cross
examination and watch how a clever law
yer will make a clever man perjure him
self. " 1t reads almost like q crime" l
remarked aloud; 4" but then it is lawful
and beneficial crime. Soldiers kill peo-
pies bodies, lawyers kill peoples reputa-
tions, and all for the good of society in
the long rum"
While was uttering the word "run,"
my ankles were grasped suddenly and
firmly; then, before could recover from
the shock, they were jerked backward I'M
der the seat with such force that l was
thrown forward. sprawling. l tried to
rise, but my right wrist was seized and
the arm twisted till was helpless, and
presently found myself on the floor of
the carriage face downward, a sharp knee
being scientifically pressed into the small
of my back, and both arms fixed behind
me. My elbows were tied together, and
then the knee was removed, and my an
kles were secured. During this latter
operation kicked and struggled.
"Hum!" said deliberate voice, THAT
will be awkward. Let's see; ali, these
will DO"
These were my sticks and umbrella,
which some one proceeded to apply as
splints to the back of my legs, using the
straps which had kept them in bundle
to fig them at the ankle and above the
knee. When he had done was as help
less as dressed turkey.
Then l was turned over carefully and
tenderly, and for the first time saw my
assailant-
He was a gentlemanly-looking man,
dressed in black coat and waistcoat, gray
trOwsers and neck-clOth. His hair and
whiskers were just turning grizzly, his
chin and upper lip were clean shaved.
His forehead was high, his eyes promi-
nose aquiline, his mouth a slit He was
of middle height, spare, but wiry; indeed, |
his muscles must have been exceptionally |
elastic and feline, for you would have |
never thought. to look at him, that he |
could stow himself away under the seat |
of a railroad carriage SO compactly.
He contemplated me, with his chin in |
his right hand, and his right elbow on
his left hand; he said, thoughtfully, "Just
30. And for the good of society in the
long run-an admirable sentiment, my
dear sir; let it be consolation to you, if
should cause you any little annoyance"
he took shagreen specialized case from
his pocket, wiped the glasses carefully
with silk handkerchief, and adjusted
them on his nose. Then he produced an
oblong box, which he unlocked, and
placed on one of the seats. After which
be sat down quietly in the place had oc-
five minutes before-a position
which brought him close over my head
and chest, as l lay supine and helpless at
his feet
DO you know anything of anatomye"
be asked. l was completely in his power
as witness in the cross-examining
;ounsels hands, and prudence dictated
hat 1 should be equally ready to answer
he most frivolous and impertinent ques-
ions with politeness. l said that l did
not.
/" Ali" he said; "well, perhaps you
nay have heard of the spleens Exactly.
Now science has never as yet been able
10 find out the use of that organ; and the
nan who bequea thed that knowledge to
oosterity would rank with the discoverer
If the circulation of the blood, and con-
er an inestimable benefit on humanity
or the remainder OF the worlds lease.
propose to dissect you"
You will not get much glory for that"
aid l, forcing myself to seem to take this
practical joke in good part
An ungrateful generation may or may
lot profit by your discovery, but it will
nfallibly hang you"
Not So" he blandly replied az am
surgeon, who once had a very consider
BILE practice, but had to stand my trial
Or an experiment which proved fatal to
ne of nay patients. The jury, unable to un-
erstand the sacrifices which an earnest
inquirer is ready to offer at the shrine of
cience, declared me mad, and l was
laced in confinement. You see that l
an act with impunity"
And he opened the box. l broke out in {
cold sweat. Was it all real? Could
be man be in earnest? But" said I,
surely you can get dead bodies to dissect j
Without having recourse to crimef And, :
gain, If generations of anatomists have I
allied In twenty thousand investigations 8
o discover the use of the spleen-if you S
'ourself have always failed hitherto, q
Thy should you suppose that this one
tempt should be more successful than
ne otherse''
/" Because, my dear sir" said the man,
nth the smile of one who had caught a
right idea, "all former investigations,
lcluding my own, have been made on :
cad subjects, while propose to examine
our vital organs with powerful magni- !,
ing glass while they are exercising !
leir normal functions :
" What" gasped. D." You will never ,
ave the barbarity--," and here my !