The Portland daily press., 1874-01-24

Gossip and Gleanings.
The dead of Winter-Flies.
Solar prominences-pegs in ones boot taps.
The world is a shadow and a sham and a
game of wits. .-AmhGd.
"sThe cause of Woman Suffrage''-Scarcity
OF husbands. a bar Ia.ag. ,a.aL M 8. .-la
Watering tie streets at present would be a
One great difference between Byron and
Burns in early youth was that the one was
Harrow boy, the other a ploughboy.
When the waiter passed Spicer some very
old cheese at the hotel table, the other day,
he responded, "Not mite"
Mere vulgar wealth, without liberality and
public spirit, is the bane of any live aud pro-
gressive community.
ADubuque young lady gave up the man
she loved, and took the one her parents ia
vored in consideration of the sum of three
dollars and sky-blue merino dress.
The overburdened man scarcely has the de-
sire to love, far less the time. We always love
and seek things at the expense of persons !:
and the man who works too much must love
too little. ai- a4. H.
'Beecher thinks piety is the best cure for
scolding wife. We don't know how that is,
but married friend around the corner says
he long ago satisfied himself that scolding
wife is the best cure for piety."
A dry-witted soldier of the Tenth Vermont,
during the war, was heard to pray once,
when the bullets we're falling in showers, as
follows: "oh, Lord, u.ake me as thin as
knife al s.as aI .al ga4. al lgaGIaa ul-
An enthusiastic African, who bad 'sspent
de winter in Jamaky," found it an earthly
paradise He said be could Gle abed, and.
putting his arms out de windy, pick oranges,
pine-apples and Jamaky rum right off de
trees.' i1H gagus danm hs a 4AA -
~ yd l3lgul8 l---lJaF i-a-.-la -u
Blind Man :--"Ah.Mr. Evins, Paint heer'd
you pass this some time-I fear'd you wos
laid up with your roomeytiz."
Mr.. Evins ;-"Worse nor that, John
worse nor that! The wife went an faund
me a job O. warkr'
An American gentleman in London, dur
ing the fog, having occasion to pet his wife
home from dinner party, handed her into a
carriage, and walked home at one horses
head, while the coachnan walked at the 9th
er. -
Mother" said little Ned, one morning.
after having fallen out of bed, 81 think I
know why fell out Of bed last night. 1t was
because slept too near where I got in.''
Musing little while, as if in doubt whether
he had given the right explanation, he added,
"No, that wasn't the reason; it was because 1
slept too near where fell out.
The New Bedford Mercury thinks that,
"sinee Hoods letters from the country there
has nothing appeared finer than the follow
ing production, which was picked up yester-
day in the street:
will Oils -s1
Will you come up to school and fight the
Maxwell paddys after scnool se a.5
Please Gomez 7 r- ll
"There can be little doubt" says she Pail
Mall Gazette, ''that by far the greater part of
the mischief done IN the is done world by siliy
people, and that Stiffness is, as rule, qui e as,
ifnot more, dan .erous to the community than
wickedness, inasmuch as the unreas oning
enjoy an immunity from punishment for
their offences, which is not extended to the
unprincipled."
sT don't believe much in the Bi ,le," said
e,llegian to an old Quaker. "Does thee be-
licve in France?'' 'Yes, do. never saw
it, but I have plenty Of proof that there is
such country" "Then thee does not be-
lieve anything unless thee or thy reliable
trends have seen it?" c,be sure won't.
'tDid thee ever see thy own braius ?'' ''No."
"Did thee ever knew anybody that has seen
tly brains?' "Nc." 'Does thee believe
thee has any brains?'.
91A A writer in London Society propounds the
following plan of silencing that worst of social
81 m