Knoxville journal. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1874-1986, 1874-08-27

common ground. on and may meet in him.
Inc past Is ended, but Is there no futures no
wiser. higher hoier future May not
this friend stand as priest in the new
sanctuary of reconciliation and mediate,
DO not let my earnestncss fail of its end. You
believe in my judgment / have put myself
wholly and gladly in Moulton's hands, and there
must meet you. This is sent with Theodore's
consent, but he has not read it. Will You return
II to me by his own hand? am very earnest in
this wish for all our sakes, such letter ought
not TO be subject to even the chance of miscar-
II. W. BEKcuER"
have no recollection of seeing or hearing read
the letter of Mr.. Tilton of the same date. In my
letter to Mrs. 1ilton | alluded 10 the fact that
did not expect when saw her last to be alive
many days. That statement stands connected
with series of symptoms which i first expe-
renced In 1856. went through the Fremont
campaign, speaking in the open air three hours
al q time three days in the week. In re-
newing my literary work felt that must have
given way. very seriously thought that / was
going TO have apoplexy or paralysis, or something
of the kind On two or three occasions. while
preaching. should have fallen in the pulpit il
had not held on TO the table. Very often came
years have gone into the pulpit l suppose 100
times with Very strong impression that should
never come out of IL alive. Have preached more
sermons than any human being would believe
when felt all the while that whatever had got
10 say to my people must say ii then or never
would have another chance TO use it, If | had
consulted physician, his first advice would have
been, You must stop work. but was in such
a situation that could not stop work. l read the
best medical books on symptoms of nervous
prostitution, and overwork, and paralysis
ana formed my own Judgment of my
case The three points marked were: | must
have good digestion, good sleep. and / must 60
on working. These three things We're 10 be rec
onciled, and in regard to my diet. and stimuants
and medicines | made the most thorough and
searching trial, and as a result, managed my
body 50 that could get the most work out Of IL
without essentially impairing it. II had said a
word about this TO my family 1t would have
brought such distress and anxiety on the part of
my wife as | could not bear | have for many
years steadily taxed my mind to the utmost
that there have been periods when | could not
afford To have people express even sympathy
with me. To have my wife or friends anxious
about it, and showing 1t to me, would be just the
drop too much.
In 1868 | came again into the same condition
just before going TO England, and il was one of
those reasons why was wishing TO go. The war
was at its height. | carried my country in my
heart, had the Independent in charge, and was
working. preaching and lecturng continually.
knew was likely 10 be Frustrated again. In De-
cember, 1870 the sudden shock of these troubles
brought on again these symptoms in a more yio-
lent form was very much depressed in mind,
add all the more because it was one of those
things that could not say anything about. was
silent with everybody. During the last four
years these symptoms have been repeatedly
brought ON Dy my intense work, carried forward
on an underlying basis OF 80 much sorrow and
pulpit / have very frequently alluded TO my ex-
pectatiOn of sudden death.
1 feel that have more than once already been
near stroke that would have killed or parayzcd
me, and carry with me now as / have SO often
carried in years before this trouble began, the
daily thought OF death as a door which might
open for me at any moment out of all cares and
labOTs into welcome rest.
During the whole of the year 1871 was kept in
state OF suspense and doubt, not only as TO the
future of the family for the reunion and happi-
which | "A
to the degree to which might personally be sub
ject TO attack and misconstruction, and the
trouble be brought into the church and magniied
by publicity. The officers of the church sought
to Investigate into Mr. Titon's religious views
and moral conduct and on the latter point mad
been deceived into the belief that he was not in
fault A. to the religious views, | still hoped
for change for the better, as IL was pro-
posed to drop him from the list OF
members for non-attendancei and as he
this might have been done; but his wife still at
tended church and hoped for his restoration. |
recollect having with him a conversation in which
he dimly intimated TO me that he thought IL not
unlikely that he might go back into his old
position. He seemed to be In mood to regret
the past, and so, when | was urged by the Exam
lining Committee to take some steps. said was
not without hopes. Meanwhile, one wing of the
femalesnfirage party had got hold of the story in
distorted and exaggerated form, such as had
never been intimated TO me by Mr.. Tilton or his
friends. | did not hen suspect what now know
that these atrociOusy false rumcrs originated
with Mr. T'ilton himself | only saw the evil
growing instead of diminishing, and perceived
that while was pledged to silence, and therefore
could not speak In my own defense, some one
was forever perscyering in lalsehood, growing
continually in dimensions, and these difficulties
were immensely increased by the utilization OF
Mr. Tilton with the Woodruff clique.
In May, 1871, Mrs. Woodruff advertised forth
coming article shadowing an account OF dis
tnrbance In Mr.. Tilton's family, but without
using names. II was delayed ostensibly by Mr.
Tilton's influence with Mrs Woodruff until
November, 1872. During this suspension Of her
publication she became the heroine of Mr.. Moul-
ton and Mr.. Titon. She was made welcome to
both houses, with the liberation but not the cor
dial consent of their wives / heard the most
extravagant euloges upon her. She WAS repre-
scented as "a genius born and reared among rude
influences, but only needed to be surrounded by
refined society to show noble and commanding
nature. ! did not know much about her, and,
though my Impressions were uniavorable, her
real character was not then really known 10 the
world met her three times At the first interview
she was gracious. At the second she was cold
aud naughty, but AT the third she was angry and
threatening for had peremptorily refused 10 pre-
side az lecture she was about TO give at stein
way Hall. The most strenuous efforts had been
made by both Tilton and MOulton TO induce me
10 preside at this lecture and to identify myself
publicly with Mrs Woodruff. Ii was represent
ed TO me that need not. In 30 doing, expressly
give assent 10 her doctrines, especially with re.
gard 10 the marriage relation, upon which point
she was beginning to be more explicit In OppOsi.
ton to the views which /, in common with all
Christian men, entertained; but IL was plausibly
urged that | could preside at the lecture and intro
ducc her upon the simple ground of advocating
free speech and liberty Of debate; bat, as I'M
derstood that che was about TO ayow doctrines
which abhor, | would not be induced by this
plausible argument TO give her public couHte-
nance. and after continuing 10 urge me mp 10 the
very day OF the meeting without any distinct
threats, but with obylOns iutimntion that my
personal safety would be better secured by
taking this advice, Mr. Tilton himself
went over 10 New York and presided
al the meeting, where Mrs. woodruff
gave vent, AZ ! understand, for the first time
In public to the full exposition Of her frce-l0yc
doctrines. The very thought that ] should
have been asked under anY circumstances
and upon any excuse 10 preside or be present at
such meeting was ineKpressibly CALLING 10 me.
Whatever my astonishmeHt might have been, the
motive Of Mr.. Titon and Mr.. Moulten IN asking
such a thing. | had not at the time az clear a
perception ] now have. The re-
quest was nevertheless humliatii 2. Al about
the same time | found that the circle OF which
Mrs. Woodruff formed part wac The center Of
loatbsome scandals, organized, classified and
perpetuated with greedy and uDclean appetite
FOR everything that was foul and vile.
would not associate with these people (thc
Woodhull circle); yet Mr.. Tilton and Mr.. Moul-
ton had some strange theory concerning the
management Of this particula aiiair,whicll always
made It., In their judgment. necessary for them
to maintain relations with this group Of human
hyenas. From this circ e, and rom dr. Tilt0n =
intimate associations with IL, rome rnmors and
suspicious arose among my own congregation