The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1874-01-22
G Ds,l. ni6on,is6.n

a.--s -,..=s---- ...,--
An Eacited GsutoR from Oieago- Wants
HIS Money ana Is Bound ID Haze It
%He Don't Vas Dakey No Csrdifed Schecs
IN Hash" .l-s.r i-.i74,....-as5sS5 - I.
The st. Louis Republican tells story,
which we condense, Of a Chicago Tsuton,
who, being depositor in a ST. Louis
bank, was all serene amid the panic
which broke out in Chicago on the re-
csption OF the news oi the financial coll
lapse in New York. Whilst the Chicago
banks were suspending, and the people
were rushing frsnticslly through the
streets looking after their deposits, Myn-
heer Won Slauss felicitated himself with
the comfortable reflection that his money
was sate-that il, was where Cooke nor
Clewso did corrupt, norr thieyes break
through and steaE he was enjoying the
excitement OF his less intimate neig6bors,
when newsboy's cry fell upon his ear
Here's your journal e6! Post! All
about the suppression Of the st. Louis
banksw a. y,.............,
Mineheer. "Der bapgs in Sanct Louis
suspended? Der Sanct Lous bangs gone
init ter tuyval, doc? -SderemenR Donner.
6letter :" 5terrl s a ~
Snatching paper he read two lines Of
the telegraphic heading They were
enough. With eyes staring from their
sockets, he looked at his watch and found
that he hadjust five minutes to strike the
Alton and St. Louis train. Hsiling hack
he apprised the driver that heef you make
me dot Sanct Louis dhrain /, eeeis Won
more ask doos dollars. Ven I 'don'tspot
by Sanct Louis do-morrow morninF
loses more monish as meier had.P3J
He had just managed to swing himself
on TO the rear platform of the hindmost
car as the. train pulled out Of, the depot
and the next mornisg saw a ahiEhiS excis
ted Teuton making his way With rapid
strides towards the door Of one Of the
principal banking institutions OF "sanct
Louis"
s"Vare ish der CASHIER ?" he ejsculatedh
g ash! he bounded ~ 9pthe steps S@sd d'isse tAs
A courtly gentleman made bland re.
.sponse. ~ am the cashier sir" what can
We do for you to;dayt' -,
"Vat gan you do vor me, sacrament 4!
Dot. ish G.d-Ll uf node aint? Dor yor
me HtIT Got donneYIoetter, and kSitsill
bIdSen! ! wants dot monish-mine gold
vot make deposit NIT tbs tam bank
poorly soon last summer und-"
,s"We have temporarily suspended nav,
ment, sir, by an arrangement similaf--p
Arrangement similar, der tuyvell"
broke in the almost breathless Teuton.
"Vat do want NIT your damt arrange.
mentsy wants dat monish-tive tou.
sand dollar vat l make deposid here ali
der vile, und ! wants him pooty Queek,
too, oot you don't want some droobles
right away r. d, gsDlLi,,
"Calm yourself, my friend, and let us
talk this matter over. ! shall be glad, to
certify your 3 Checks tor ydur,baIsnce With
"Certity nodings! vot you tink was,
tam fool ? Here here | (poundine the
counter. irantically with his fists) ] wants
dot monish dot ld-eferY; cent, and i
wants him Srightavay, queeks ovnt oder
l makes you q heep o droobles pooty
soonl Geet me dot monish-dot green
backs-dot ish all vot / vantl Make him
ownt queek und l COED righd avay of.
und you can go nit der tuyfel undi your
tam pank"
Seeing there was no way of reasoning
with his excited customer, the cashier
turned to his paying teller and said: "Mr.
-, cash this mans check for his bal
ance in full"
Selling the pen with nervous grip the
depositor drew up his check, and the ur.
bane teller counted out the sum 1t called
for. At the sight Of the greenbacks he
drew in one good, long breath. counted
his money carefully, put 1t in his breast
pocket, and went his way a happy man.
The cashier went back to his office and
had been seated there some minutes,
when the prominent nasal appendage Of
his Teutonic customer again overshadow.
ed the counter, and his voice was again
heard: "Mf. GaShief, AT wood like do
shpeek NIT you spmedings." ~
Ghihking7 that perhaps lhisl customer
had recovered from his fright and desired
TO re-deposit his funds, the cashier re-
sponded quickly and came forward 10 the
counter. "Well sir" said he, Hwhat is the.
matter matt !; now s15WaiStu 2'N3gj lIs.1
1Vell, you see, yen ! hear about ais
dings NIT der banks. / vas in, SheecaCo
und I mus goom right. away gqueek here
und ! drinks dotit will petall 'righd ven
you bay mine ledle exbenses down here
and pack home und"-SD
Pay your expenses!" broke in the
cashier. Pay your expenses laJ Well
that is an idea, 10 be s6fe, See here
my friend, how many brass bands do
you suppose could be supplied with n.
stfuments from that cheek OF yours and
then have bronze enough left 10 make an
edieStfian statue Of jim FiskP Ahont
how many slx.gun batteries of'tW6iye!
pound Napoleon howitsers were mSited
down to make that cheek .auyhowP'SS 4
The excited individual from Chieadn
eyed his intetl6 6tutof with the injured aSt
Of one who thipks he has been refused a