Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1874-10-15
PHUNNYGRAMS.

-" What is bullhead lucky" asks Il
Kentucky paper, Twisting mules tail
and getting away from his heels without
being kicked, comes near enough to an
swer the question,
Thou rainest in this bosom,n was
the remark Of a Lothario when his fair
one threw II basin of water over him for
caterwauling" under her chamber win
dow.
-" tell you what" said Troy
widower, rs he spit out OF the window,
it seems awful when l think Sary's
down in the ground instead of being
around fixing to dry apples"
A Chicago woman dipped her feet in
the Mississippi River, at St Louis, the
other day, and the effect was noticed as
far down rs Memphis, where the water
rose several inches.- Brooklyn Argus,
49," Wen, how do you get alongg' in
CURED country landlord, one rainy
morning, OF guest whom he had put
in top-iloor room under a lcaky roof.
"Oh, swimmingly," was the reply.
--How's your husband, Mrs Dolkins?"
Wen, sir, it's uncertain. The doctor
says if he lives till morning he shall
have some hopes of him; but if he
doesn't, he's afraid he shall have to give
him up"
A Maine paper is publishing list
of all the accidents by drowning during
the last forty or fifty years; and the
little boys are greatly impressed by it,
and frequently read The sad chronicle
they have come out of the river.
-" hope, Mrs. Giles" said a lady
who was canvassing for a choir at the
village church, you will persuade your
husband to join us! am told he has u
very sonorous voice" "a sonorous
voice, marmY" said Mrs. Giles. Ali you
should hear it coming out of his nose
when he's asleep"
The other day minister offered
prayer at the laying of a cornerstone.
A brisk young reporter hustled up and
said; 81 wish you would give me the
manuscript of that prayer" II never
write out my prayers" replied the
preacher Well" said the reporter Il
couldn't hear n word you said" 81
masnt praying to yon," quickly responded
the parson.
A fellow rushed into an office one
morning with the interrogation: What's
the difference between the mice that
have just been eating my greenbacks
and the epistles of Pauly" All present
subsidized, and he gasped They're both
scripchewers" and then rapidly pro-
ceeded to the door.
Justice Bartholomew Lynch, of New
Orleans, is one of the judicial notabili-
ties of that city. After listening to u
two-hour argument by Lawyer Hagan,
the other day, he raised himself slowly
in his chair and inquired very mildly:
F" Are yc through, Mister Hagang" Yes,
sir" Are ye sure you're through"
" Yes, sir; quite sure" We'll Sir" re-
marked Lynch "your argument has had
no more effect upon the Court than a
spoonful Of water on the back Of duck.
There's been judgment entered up
against ye for an hour or more
The Detroit Free Press records the
following touching incident Sunday
night a policeman on Baker street. pass
ing certain house about ten o'clock,
saw a man drop from a window and
heard smothercd cries inside He seized
the man for a burglar, but sosn found
that he had the owner of the house in his
"Wcll,n said the officer, at
looks suspicious to see you drop out Of
a window that way" well" replied
the man, heaving a sigh, "when the old
gets her dander up amt partic-
ular about what road take to get out of
the house"