Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1874-02-14
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1Op0 YOU II NC aDlO " tSA
straighter story before the magis-
trate, young man; cause if you don't
you stand smart chance of being
sent up for six months.
"Oh, Charles, this is horrid. Do
send him away. Oh dear! Wish l
was at home," sobbed the little
bride.
81 tell you sir,'' said the bride
groom bristling up with indignat
ton, "this is a vile plot. What
would l be doing with your paltry
spoons? | was married this morn
ing in Fifth Avenue, and l am on
my wedding tour. l have high con-
in New York. You'll re-
pent it, sir, if you dare to arrest
Tiaoh, Il; come, % now, said the meped- X,
ulous official. l have heard stories
like that before. This amt the first
time swindlers have travelled in
couples. Do you 'spose don't
know nothin'? Tan't no use, you've
Just got to come along to the station
house. Night as well 60 Peaceably,
cause you'll have to.
"Charles this is perfectly dread
full! our wedding night in the sta
ton house. Do send for somebody.
Send for the Landlord to explain
it."
The Landlord was sent for, and
came; the lwaitefs Snd2 chamber
maids and bar-room loungers came
without being sent for, and filled
the room and adjoining hall-some
TO laugh, some to say they wouldn't
have believed it, but nearly all to
exult that the unhappy pair had
been ''fouud out" No explana-
tion could be given; and the upshot
was, that, in spite of tears threats,
entreaties, rage and expostulatiens,
the unfortunate newly married pair
were taken in charge by the relent-
less policeman, and marched down
stairs to the police Office.
And here let the curtain drop on
the melancholy scene, while we
follow the fortunes of black YaliBe
No. 2.
When the train stopped at Cam
dem, four gentlemen got off, and
walked arm in arm rapidly and 81
lent up one of the by streets, and
struck off into a footpath leading to
a secluded grove outside of the
town. , Ofithe firstttwo, one was our
military friend in blue coat, APP
parenly the leader of the party.
OF the second two, one was a smil
ing, rosy little man, carrying a
valise. The respective companions
walked with hasty, irregular
strides, were distracted, and appar.
emily i'll at ease.
The party stopped.
"This is theaplace, VI said Captain
Jones.
eyes," said Doctor Smith.
The Captain and Doctor conferred
together. The other two studiously
kept apart.
''Very well. I'll measure the
ground" -'
1t was done.
'Now for the PISTOLS" whispered
the Captain to his fellow-second.
"They are all ready in the va,
lse," replied the Doctor.
The principals were placed, ten
PAGES apart, wearing that decidedly
uncomfortable look a man has who
is in momentary expectation of be-
"You will fire, gentlemen, stimuli
taneously when 1 give the word u
said the Captain. Then, in and un-
dertone to the Captain, "Quick the
pistols"
The Doctor STOPPING over and
fumbling at the valise, appeared to
find something that surprised him.
"Why, what the devil"
"Why, what's the matter?'' asked
the Captain, starting up. "Can't
you find the caps?"
''Duee aspistoleor cap, Chut this''
He held up a lady's night cap!
"Look here-and-here-and-
here-and-here!"- e!"-holding up sue
cessively hair brush, long white
night-gown, a cologne bottle and
comb.
They were greeted with a long
whistle by the Captain, and a blank
stare by the two principals.
"Confound the luck?" calculated
the Captain, eff we haven't made a
mistake and brought the wrong va
lise."
The principals looked at the sec
onds. Nobody volunteered a sug-
gestion. At last the Doctor in
quired.
"Well, what's to be done?"
"D-d unlncky!"n "nejaculated the
Captain. ''The duel can't go on. -
"Evidently not" responded the
Doctor, sunless they brain each 9TH
er with the hair brush, OF take a
pop at each other with the cologne
bottle"
quite sure there are, 20
pistols i'm the Yalise3' said one pf
the principals with suppressed eager
ness, and drawing a breath of evil
dent relief.
ave might go over to the city
and get pistols, D proposed the Cap
tain.
"And by that time it will be
dark" said the Doctor.
Cd unlucky,'' . said the Captain
again.
'We shall be the laughing stock
of the town if this gets Wind" con-
solingly remarked the Doctor.
Gone word with you, Doctor, "
here interposed his principal.
They conferred.
At the end of the conference
with his principal, the Doctor advan-
cling to the Captain conferred with
his principal. Then the seconds
conferred with each pther.i FINALLY,
it was formally agreed with the two
contending parties that statement
should be drawn up in writings
whereby principal No. l rendered
the assurance that the offensive
words, "Your are liar," were not