The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1874-11-10
Sense and eNopsense.

Bind tustice-A judge asleep.
Brokers generally hold losn hand.
Who can speak all languages P Echo
Az act. Of CRATE politeness-Polish.
ing stove
The chasm tba. swallows up wit
Sarcasm.
The press that printers like--A press
of business
The FIRST tubulcr bridge-The bridge
OF the nose
Flguratively speaking-Using the
dunS language.
Thes scfobats ef.e+esy household
The pitcher and tumbler.
Why is wainscotcd room like q re.
prieve Pit saves hanging
Darn her, let her burn, then," says
Chicago.
What color was the last squall at
sea2 Why, the storm rose and the
wind blue.
Though Titana bade Bottom listen to
her, she never asked him to lend her
his ears. FE a q
Why is New York omnibus like q
lithograph because It's drawn or
stone
| A Boston bark is curiously complex
! ioned. The vessel is Brown, the mas
ter Greenish.
Naturalists tell us that such q thing
as mouse is to be found on the Cat
skill mountains. .,
! A New Yorker has sued man fol
calling him "next thing to a mule" HI
called him an ass
/ An artist painted cannon go natu
rally that, when he was finishing th'
touch-hole, it went off at very goot
price. .aj..
| In Montana, when an editor Is crowd
ed for room, he announces, IA numbe
Of deaths are pravoidably postponed
! The New York Commercial Advert
ser says: There is no plural to Dadd,
Longlegs, as it's always been regarded
as singular creature.
| A Boston man lost 81, 1000 and offer
! ed 5000 reward if the fiuder would re
store it, but the finder wouldn't do it,
He was believer in monopoly.
Master of the house (the man ha
called TO look at the meter )-"Dea
me! Well, l wouldn't have believed it
Actually watering the gas, now"
! A builder, when returning thanks t.
those who had drank his health, modest
ly observed that he was "more fitteG
for the scaffold than for public speak
ing"
A western watering-place reporte
J, sends this to his paper: "Thc Hoosie
lady who ale half bushel Of warn
doughnuts for her supper has returne
home.
New Orleans justices are becomin
pretty particular. One of them refuse
: to issue warrant the other day becaus
the complainant's breath smelt of or
ions.
I The sable hueil gentlemen OF George
town held tournament at Analosto
! Island, recently. 1t is not difficult fo
darkey to undertake the character 9
knight.
"My dear sir" said a candidate al
costing stray wag on the day of elet
! ton, II am very glad to see you."-
you needn't be" replied the wag, ''
have voted"
"To holding post-mortem examin:
shun on horse who was afterwards rt
covered, 81 50," was one of the item
in $ horse-doctor's bill paid by an Orr
gon stock owner.
, A::Missouri doctor couldn't tell a
senic from chalk until one of his ps
: tients died, and now he doesn't docto
:, any more. The crowd left him in
|, placid pond.
.. A New Hampshire liquor dealer hs
: posted up in his shop: s'Children unde
. ten years of age will not be- allowed
; get drunk on these premises unless al
companied by their parents" Al
! A Cedar Rapids man paid for tick
4 to Dubuque and return, recently, bl
/ refused to receive the pasteboard whe
q the, clerk handed it to him, on tf
o ground that the bills said he was ent
I ted to round ticket. "a.
Some enterprising wasps started
e nest over night in the trousers of
k boarder in St. Paul hotel, and whe
, the gentleman thrust his leg througl
/. next morning, the whole town WASH
e large enough to hold him.
: Lancaster county, Pa, has an o.
j. lady who recently refused the gift of
0 load of wood from a tree struck /
e lightning, through fear that some Of Il
:, ''fuid' might remain in the wood ar
$ cause disaster to her stove.
- Cabby to passenger. after descendir
= Ashburton avenue-"Give me anoth
= quarter and I'll tell you startlil
:, - story" The money was paid Cabby-
o II brought you down that hill witho
3 - Inch pin in."
n A Cincinnati young man sent q no
to his girl askinga at what time he shou
O cali, and received in return the folio
e ing brief billet doux:
h "DEER JoN-Comet afpastate.
,e MARY"
y A Michigan marksman simultaneou
s, ly slew seven polecats by the single d
J. charge of his breech loader. The pc
g pie Of the neighborhood imagined +
t. several days afterward that they We
u living in Cincinnati
~ At school at Wallsend, near Ne
~ castle, England, the master asked
y class Of boys the meaning of tie wo
~ "appetite," when, after short psu
Is Is one little boy said, II know, sir; VIII
~ ~ I'm eat;n' I'm 'appy. and when /
~ done I'm tight"
~ ~ A little girl in Boston, only FIVE ye'
,lf old, said to her mother the other d'
m when she proposed reading to her t
N last number OF the Nursery: IN
mamma; don't read me that child
stuff; read me about the Beecher cas-
be "This," says the man with poetry
,d his. soul. "is the golden Indian su
ed mer" Then he tries 10 cough the d.