The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-05-29
FACTS AND FANnIEa-
That genius must be Of STARTLING
rider which makes a bed spring.

| Crosse with two perfect tongues grows
up, there will be difficulty in getting a
husband for her.
The advantage Of having a good
memory is illustrated by a Bangor
gentleman who recalls raking hay in a
July snow-storm about seventy years
ago. -,
in the last two years forty English
steamers Eave entered Norfolk, Va, har-
bor, bringing 1850 English passengers
and more than $1,000, 600 Of wealth 10
the country.
A yonnp, unmarried clergyman, of
Bruokport, Penn. offers twenty cords
wood for a good wife. He retains just
enough for crematory purposes, IN case
she isn't success.
TIN so thirsty !" said a boy at
work in a corn-field. "Well, woik
away" said his industrious father.
" You know the prophet says: Hoe,
every one that thirsteth.
Prof. Smell, of Amherst college,
says that his records show that the lass
April was tire coldest one in thirty-siS
years, the temperature having been sew
en- degrees below the mean.
"A Savannah dancing master has en-
tered suit against the Savannah ami
Skidnway railroad for 500 damages.
from the failure of the train to take him
to his dancing class on time.
Daniel Pratt now comes 10 the sur
face to say that no man can strike IA
harder blow by splitting on his hnndr
first, and that IL is n useless custom
which he would like TO see abolished.
Her name was Katie Martin OF
Newark, n. j., and she jumped ropo
three hundred times, and now, in Tho
language of4fhe Philadelphia Ledger
obituaries, "she has climbed the golden
stair"
1.-THE most difficult thing to reach
is a woman's pocket, especially II tho
dress is hung up in a closet, and
the man is in n hurry" says the Danbu-
ry News: but the women themselves
have n different opinion on the subject.
A Denver (Colorado) physician pro-
tests ageinst eastern doctors allowing
their patients in the last stage OF con-
sumption to go to Colorado. The air
is rarer, aud contains less oxygen, and
is too trying if the disease is far adyan-
ced.
-Four Springfield ladies enjoyed
themselves, Sunday. They sat and
heard their minister tell what good wo-
men their husbands first wives were,
and admired the memo ial windows by
which the sorrowing man hal commem-
GRATED their virtues.
The Brunswickcr, OF Missouri,
saws "There is an undetiuable some
thing about some men which commands
our respect, whether we sec them head
ing a conquering squadron, leading
child TO the sanctuary, or bending IN
lowly toll over an onion bed
Haven't got better undershirt
than this? It's split clear down tho
back" is what Upton man Hnarled at
his wife Sunday morning. And when
the lady looked in and saw her indignant
husband standing with his arms run
down the legs Of his drawers, and look
ing for some place TO put his head
she shrieked aud ran out Of
the room TO conceal her emotion.
A darkey was trying TO steal agooso,
but n fierce dog raised ar opposition
and Sambo retired. The next night he
tried il again, but violent thunder
stol m intertered, and just as he had
captured his prize the lightning struck
him and nearly frightened the poor fell
low to death. Dropping the goose, 10
ran Off muttering: "Peers 10 me dcre
am q mighty lot of fuss made 'bou,
common goose y
1t was an unfortunate idea making
.he new ten-cent scrip so much like the
fifty cent scrip. IL is no pleasant sem
lation, after huTying from store and
al the way home rndcr the impression
hat You have beaten somebody out OF
'orty cents, 10 find you have the right
,hange after all. We may be little
)reiudiced, but 10 strikes us this ia tnk-
ng an uugenerous advantage Of trust
ng nature.
DR.. Beard is Of opinion that the in
elect reaches its maximum develop
nent at the age of forty, after which
: begirs TO decay. He not only thinks
hat men lose intellectual power after
his age, but that they become worse,
,ften much worse, as they become old
r; that they lose their moral enthusi-
SIN, or moral courage, or capacity OF
esisting temptation and enduring dis
and frequently sink iuto
emile debauchees.
"A couple recently applied 10 a New
ersey Justice 20 be married. On cate
hising the lady the justice learned that
he had husband living, and had never
cen divorced from him. The Young
ian ihereupon declared that the OBJ
tacle was insurmountable, and the cer-
mony could not take place. " II that
all the trouble" said the would-be
ride, "I1l just take my little pi tol
nd shoot that nasty husband Of mine
n the SPOT"
The German reichstag is hereafter
Ding TO do its voting by telegraph.
he wires are TO be 80 arranged that
lch member can indicate his vote from
is seat. In front of the seat are two
uttons, one indicating yes, the other
D. A pressure on the button telegraphs
10 vote TO n circular table in front of
le presidents desk, upon which all tho
ames of the members are written down,
, that Immediately after pressing tho
1tton each member can see piece OF
lper appear under his name with bis
ss or no on il.
"A nice young man in Des Moines
IT married not long ago. He had
orked his way TO the bottom OF ths
aver, and got reduced 20 the last
can shirt. He thereupon rose earlier
an usual one morning, snd kindled
q. When hanging on the kettle, lie
ade a noise on purpose 20 arouse his
fe. She Immediately peeped over tho
ankets, and exclaimed "My dear,
hat are you doing?" He deliberately
sponded "Tve put on my last clean
irt, and I'm going TO wash one for
yself." every well, replied she,
you had better wash one for me, too J.
"A gentleman visited the family who
~ not only very homely but was pos
ssed of one Of those fearful mouths
at stretch from ear 10 ear, and arc
termed, lawful mouths for
e." During the evening, amidst
use in the conversation, theRentleman
.wned, displaying a fearful chasm and
wing reason for fear lest his head
1uld split in two. Up jumped the
rrible infant, walked slowly up 10 the
Test, saying, before the mouth was
irly shut, 10 the great amusement Of
ose present and the horror Of ia,
nily, DO so again, please y
whose unhappy lot in life
has been 10 live next door 10 n musi-
family, will appreciate a story that is
d of Won Rulow, the eminent German
mist. An aspiring genius had been
- n.