Litchfield enquirer., 1874-10-01


 China has streets paved with gfanitc blocks laid over three hundred years ago, and as good as new. .....
 A Buffalo paper announces that by the burning of an icehousc there, 20,0O0 tons ot ice were reduced to ashes"
 Are there any fools in town?" asked a stranger of q newsbOy, yesterday!fT !fT ..' don't know" replied the boy, why, are you lonesome?"
 Lady visitor-"" My dear, do you know if your mamma is engaged?"f Little girl of the period Engaged bless you, why, she's marricd?" minister, who caught her mapping, was, Don't you think ladies had better be fast asleep than fast awake?"
 If a naughty girl should hurt you, like Q good girl you would forgive Her, wouldn't you?" ''Yes, mafln,' she re, piled, eff I couldn't Catch her"
 There are forty-two catacombs in and around Rome, with galleries 5S7 miles long, end it is estimated that from four to seven millions of bodies have found sepulture therein.
 Some one who would seem to know says that women are housewives in Ger many, queens in England, ladies, in France, captivcs in Italy, slaves in Spain, and coquettes in America.
 | The boy who, when asked to what trade he would wish to be brought up, 1 replied: "l will be trustee, because l ever since papa has been a trustee we have had buildings for dinner" was q wise child ill his generation.
 An unfortuuate man in Indianapolis. who lost several toes by car wheel, Whist, there! you're making more noise than many a man l'g6 seen with l his head off"
 A Cape May youth used tue deed ol l his fathers farm for gun wads. The stamp on the bottom of the document wasn't anything like the impresslon the | old man made on tho same part of the lads anatomy.
 An officer in the Washington Navy | yard announces that he has an old relia- be bunion which he is jesirous to ex. change for more modern sort of baro- meter that will not get so excited at every little shower that comes up.
 "Is there any person you would wish me to marry?" said wife to q dying | spouse, who had been somewhat of | tyraEt in his day. Marry the devil, il you like," was the gruf reply. "NO, l thank you, my dear; one husband from the same family is enough fOr nc"
 A keen-witted servant girl in Troy, told the milkman the other day that he | gave his cows too much sait. How do you know that?" said inc laclcalis,. Sure l kin tell De fh" milk that they drink too much water entifciyr' said the 1 girl. The milkman drove oT in q hurIy.
 A Greek scholar has tried punning. and says: Alpha Bctacol dissertations don't Sigma Phi anything to us, but we once Nu Il man who Kappa Phi Rho bank, and Lambda pal because he Beta l pile on q Gamma cards, and then Delta Beta Rho of trumps to his opponent than | to himself"
 Whats your businessP" said the magistrate of q Police Court, the other morning, to prisoner Pm an ob- serVationist, your worship" An ob | Seryationist! what is that?" "One who | looks around in the daytime to sec what he can steal st night, if it pleases your worship"
 They tell q queer story about the doctors ill Q certain Texas town. who | were all away last Summer 10 attend il medical convention They were absent about two months, and on their return found all their patients had recovered the drug stores had closed, the nurses had opened danCing schools, and inc l cemetery had been cut up in building | lots.
 An old lady, possessed of large for tune, and noted for her pcnchant for the use or hguratlVe expressions, one day assembled her grandchildren, when the following c0nyc;stion took place. My children" said Inc old lady "rm the 1 foot and you're the branches" Grand -" was thinking how much better thr l branches would flourish if the root was | under ground"
 A boy in Chautauqua County struck | dog The owner Of inc dog, hearing of the outrage, went two miles on the | double quick after inc boy, and having | found him, inquired, ill stern tones, Are | you the boy that stuck my dog?" "I am, sir said the lad. "Well," was the reply, Call I've got to say is, that il 1 was well for you 1 wasn't there" Hay | ing inflicted this fearful punishment, the indignant man walked proudly away, and reached his home safely. Young America, although unusually l wide awake, in due time becomes sleepy, is did little Dickey, one evening ifs l grandmother put him to bed, and, as was her custom, read to him cha pter ill the Bible, remarking, Nov, Dicky, | | have read you a whole chapter, and l you must go to sleep" "NO, grand
 ma, l ain't sleepy now; read another" The old lady complied, and said, "NOw l you must go to sleep; have read you ] two chapters" "No, not yet; read one more-rcad the rubber, grandma" What else could the good woman do?
 The editor of the Burlington uowa, l Ha@keye has discovered q woman who will get up at six o'clock, kindIc the fire, ] get breakfast, rOut out the family, wasll the dishes and six children, sew d but. 1 ton on the neck of her husbands shirt and hunt his hat, go to 8 Mission Sunday l School and teach u class, attend church, l rush home and have dinner over and the things cleared away in time for at tcrnOon Sunday School, read the Sunday 1 School papers to the children, go to l church at night, and talk on her way l home about Sunday as day of rest. "ls sf,-
 A teacher, wishing to i'm prove the Oc. casion, said to the boys, at the coDclu- sion of a strawberry festival: Have | you enjoyed these berries to-day?" "Yes, sir" came from all sides, with unmis-
 takable heartiness Well, children, if you had seen these berries growing in my
 garden, and had slpped in through the
 gate without my leave, and picked them
 rom the vines, would they have tasted
 ss good as nOw?' No, sir" was the
 prompt reply. Why notY" Because"
 said a wide-aWako boy, then wo
 shouldn't have hal sugar and cream witt | 'eIn''
 l A STRANGE MOSS AGATE.
 resident of Indianapolis has a moss I !,