The Western advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1872-1874, 1874-05-09


Where are my wild thoughts going
On restless, rapturous wing!
hear = step on the pathway-l look into the kind
care moi what is the weatherl-I know not where
are the skies!
--CAristtan Union.
UNDER THE SEAT.
"SMoKINa.cARR1Aa sir?" asked the
tip expecting porter, as he bore my rugs
and minor packages along the platform.
said yes, and he made me comfortable
and received his sixpence. Then the
guard came to look after my we'll being,
but got nothing more than innocent
gratitude, which was perhaps all he de-
sired. I have no doubt that I did him
injustice in attributing his efforts to intro
duce fat old gentleman with cough, a
lean old gentleman who was snuffy, and
\ middle.aged gentleman who was envel-
oped in wraps, the lower part of whose
face was covered up like female Turks,
an evident window.shu to enter my
carriage, in order to spite me.
Duty to his employers alone made him
endeavor to fill up, but the British anx-
iety to get as much room as possible for
my money was strong within me, and
stirred uncharitable suspicious.
You may lead q horse to the water, or
an anti.nicotinian old gentleman to .
smoking carriage, but you can't make
him get in; and when each in turn put
his head into my compartment he jibbed,
for some late occupants Of it had been
cigar, not pipe, smokers, and it was
rather strong. So was apparently left
alone-alone with the Times and all the
comic weeklies and a modern poem.
The doors were banged, the engine
whistled, the train began to move. It
would not stop again till we got to Peter.
borough, so that was safe to be undis-
turbed 10 far. There we're six seats and
I could occupy as many Of them as linn
tied number Of members permitted. l
almost wished myself an Octopus, to take
full advantage Of the situation. Calming
piece Of noedlework won in q bazaar
rntt1e, lit my pipe, cut my papers, and be-
gan to enjoy myself.
sat in the left-hand corner, with my
back TO the engine, absorbed in in q big
lawsuit. 1t is grest fun to read cross.
examination and watch how clever law
yer will make clever man perjure him
SELF ut reads almost like q crime," I
remarked aloud; but then it is a lawful
and beneficial crime. Soldiers kill peo-
ple's bodies, lawyers kill peoples reputa-
tiOns, and oil for the good Of society in
the long run"
While was uttering the word "run,"
my ankles were grasped suddenly and
firmly; then, before I could recover from
the shock, they were jerked backward un-
der the seat with such force that I was
thrown forward, sprawling. I tried to
rise, but my right wrist was seized and
the arm twisted till was helpless, and
presently found myself on the floor OF
the carriage face downward, sharp knee
being scientifically pressed into the small
of my back, and both arms fixed behind
me. My elbows were tied together, and
then the knee was removed, and my an.
kles were secured. During this latter
operation kicked and struggled.
Hum!" said deliberate voice, "that
will be awkward. Let's see; ah, these
will do"
"These" were my sticks and umbrella
which some one proceeded to apply a.
splints to the back Of my legs, using thu
straps which had kept them in a bundle
to fix them at the ankle and above thu
knee. When he had done was as help
less as dressed turkey.
Then I was turned over carefully ant
tenderly, and for the first time saw my
assailant.
He was q gentlemanly-looking man
dressed In black coat and waistcoat, graz
trowsers and neck-cloth. His hair ane
whiskers were just turning. grizzly, hi!
His forehead was high, his eyes promi
nent and fixed in their expression. hi!
nose aquiline, his mouth q slit. He wa
of middle height, spare, but wiry; indeed
his muscles must have been EXCEPTIONAL,
elastic and feline, for you would hav'
never thought, to look at him, that h,
could stow himself away under the sea
of q railroad carriage 80 compactly.
He contemplated me, with his chin il
his right hand, and his right elbow O,
his left hand; he said, thoughtfully, "Jus
20. And for the good of society in tn
long run-an admirable sentiment, m,
dear sir; let It be consolation to you, i
/ should cause you any little annoyance.
He took shagreen spectacle.case from
his pocket, wiped the glasses CAREFUL,
with = silk handkerchief, and adjuste,
them on his nose. Then he produced al
oblong box, which he unlocked, an
placed on one of the seats. After Whic]
he sat down quietly in the place 1 had OF
cupled five minutes before-a positio
which brought him close over my hea
and chest, a. I lay supine and helpless q
his feet.
"Do you know anything of anatomy
he asked. Twas completely in his powe
~ a. witness in the cross.examinin
counsel's hands, and prudence dictate
that should be equally ready to answe
the most frivolous and impertinent que,
tions with politeness. said that l di
not.
"Ah!" he said; "well, perhaps 70
may have heard Of the spieenl Exactl,
Now science has never as vet been abb
to find out the use of that organ: and th
man who bequeathed that knowledge
posterity would rank with the discover,
Of the circulation of the blood, and COZ
fer an inestimable benefit on humanit
for the remainder Of the worlds lease.
propose to dissect you."
"You will not get much glory for that
said I, forcing myself to seem to take tn
outrageous practical joke in good pal
An unorstefnl generation may or MT