The Portland daily press., 1874-08-07
from the st. Louis Republican,
A Stroll With a Candidate.

lne campaign is coming on. III Iact, u Is
already here. A campaign is something that
makes candidates plenty. 1t makes drinks
CHEAP, too-for everybody but the candidates
You have all seen candidate and know how he
looks. The fact is, you can't see much else at
this season of the year.
But the Americans are q patriotic race.
Ninety-nine out of every hundred of them will
give up situation worth .$5, 900 year to take
an Office worth s., 900, and think he has done
big thing. II is so genteel to be servant of the
state at Jefferson City or in Washington. By
the way, let us draw distinction. There are
two great public buildings at Jefferson City,
both of which are set apart for the servants Of
the state. In one case the servants are nomn-
ated by convention and elected by majority.
In the other Case they are nominated by a
grand and elected by petit jury. There is a
great deal of difference in the service rendered
by these two classes of servants Of the state but
sometimes there isn't as much difference be-
tween the two classes of servants as there ought
to be.
But to resume About every other man you
meet nowadays is candidate. You can
always tell him when you see him, by the be-
nevolent look on his face. Well, one of the in
tellectu.l agents (vulgarly called reporters) of
the Republican met candidate yesterday.
Walked with him around two squares. 1t was
a terrible ordeal.
Did you ever walk with candidate at this
season of the year, and if so. how did you get
home? Probably in handcart. But maybe IN
wbeelbarrow. If you never did, don't try it.
1t is not good for the liver
The intellectual agent first saw the candidate
at the corner of Fourth and Chestnut He was
talking with saloon-keeper in the Third ward.
The saloon-keeper is hard case, and his place
is resort for the b'hoys. But the candidate
held him affectionateiy by one hand and was
patting him familiarly on the shoulder with the
other. The saloon-keeper had the best of it,
and he knew it. So he let his hat slide down
over his west eye and shrugged up his east
shoulder, as much as to say he was a sort of
king-pin in the political apple cart
Something was said about Kings. The cam
date said it, of course, for he was doing all
the talking. So Kings it was. When we had
gone about ten steps we met a somewhat dilap-
idated Irishman.
by both hands. The intellectual agent has
known this candidate for space of four years
and this was the first time he ever heard him
talk with a brogue. But there it was, as un
mistaEable as Tipperary.
Never knew l was an Irshman before!
Why, Lord bless you, I've always been an
Irisnman'
'sAv coorse hez an Irlshman.'
Then there was brief season of whispered
confidence, and the advance upon Kings was
resumed with reiniorcements. By the time we
got there we had picked up seven recruits.
They were hard set-all but the candidate
and the Intellectual. Then we went out and
on down the street Met two more Irishmen.
known him sixteen years; knew him in the
old country. More drinks of course. This
time it was the Hole n-the-Wall. Then went
out on the sidewalk and met more constituents
The constituent is thirsty soul, particularly at
this season OF the year. Still more drin ks
Then we started for Olive street. Between
Pine and Olive met thirteen constituents. Can
dldate shook hands with all of them, patted
nine of them on the back took four of them to
one side for confidential talk, and loan ed one
OF them half a dollar. At the corner of Fourth
and Olive street met three more constituents;
| shook hands With them, and said something
| about going down towards Third; started down
and on the way picked up five recruits. 1t is
amazing how many constituents it tlkes to
make an Office holder. This time it wa, beer
Then more beer. Finally more beer 1t re-
quires great Geal of beer to create the same
amount of patriotic fervor that can be envolved
from small quantity of whskey. 1t would
never do for a candidate for any important
Office, with large constituency, to depend ON
beer He would burst before the campaign
was half over. Beer is undoubtedly healthier
for the constituent than whiskey, but it would
be death to the candidate.
Recapituation: Walked around two blocks;
met thirty constituents; treated eight of them
to whiskey; had confidential talks with seven
inquired after the families Of nine; beered
nine; loaned half dollar to one And the
convention is not even called yet.