davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

An Irishman having accidentally bro
ken pane of glass in a window of a
house, was making the best of his way
to get out of sight, but unfortunately
for Pat, the proprietor stole march on
him, and having seized him by the col
laI, exclaimed +: Didn't you break that
window g "To be sure / did, replied
Pat "and didn't you see me running
home for the money to pay for it,"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

THE TUNKER CHURCH CONFERENCE.
The national conference Of Tunkers,
held at Girdrd, Illinois, on the 2Gth OF
May, had a long discussion on the pro
per manner Of wearing the beard, and
it was decided, that, while 1t has ever
been the rule oil the Church TO wear Il
full beard, it is not permitted TO wear
moustaches only. The question Of al
lowing the members TO engage in the
banking business was discussed, and
decided in the negative, as it would
lead to coyetousness, litigation and usu-
ry. all of which are forbidden by the
sect. On the question Of collegiate ed
uca;ion it was decided TO be inadyisable
to send children to college. 1t was de
termined not to permit the use of their
names in the establishment Of high
schools controlled by the Church.
4 society of this same church also
took into consideration difficulty
which mightarise under the social equal
ity bill. The Chicago Tribune says Of
it.
at is customary to receive new Dun
kards with "a holy kiss, and the ques-
ton has arisen whether this ceremony
can be omitted in the case OF colored
brethren and sisters. While the Soeietyis
disposed to insist that all men and wo-
men are equal before God, yet out Of
regard for the delicate sensibilities OF
Virginia Dunkards, the agitating ques-
ton whether ''the holy kiss" shall be
dispensed without regard to race, ,color,or
previous condition OF servitude will be
delerated to individual churches.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
BRONCHITIS is noe a s5y Of .1s 5sle'o%n: n".ea:

DNUNOUl | ID uon oilhe mu,cu-
ous membrane of the Bronchla which causes
constant desire to eXPectorate, but win all The
Efforts in scrapiDg, coughing or sneeZing tuele
i5 10 mucous 10 be raised, and the aimcuiy
incsclslu. until il becomes chronic; constant
l,5arseuess follows years Of suffering anu oealh
may result from this neglect If allowed 10 go
on year after year without attempting 10 checH
snG cure 1t. Use Briggs Throat aud Lung
Healer. Sold by II NJ. Billings, Shepherds
town, and u FIney Smith, ShdrPsDurS'
AIOOA Reward for any incurabe case oil
EGIUUU catarrh. After having snutted,
deiuged, gargied, hawked, spit aud gagged 10
YOUR eulire satisfaction III your useless ehoe3I 70
ors TO get relief from catarIh, use Br!ggs Al
lryhntor, according to directions. The hfhy
mass of uucuous will bc Immediately eAPelied,
and the inliamed surface sooihed, Tue eyes
sparkle with delight, the head feels natural
asaIn; hope reyives, for cure Is sure 70 ioiio"
the use OF this agreeable, scientific and reliable
remedy. Sold by II. NJ. Billings, Shepherds
town, and q. Finley Smith, Sharps0ur5.
NnHDjJ\t COLDS AND SORE THRoAT.-
CUUUHO At all The season of the year
people suffer more or less with throat and lung
diseases, manliestng themselves IN various
forms such as coughs, bronchlts, laryhgtis,
asthma. pbtbisic and other highways 10 that
prince of terrorS-cO consumption. lhouSahus
are neslecting themselves when they are SLOW
Iy but s,,r,ly drifting onward TO certain de-
s;rucilon, who might, with little care, ana oy
the use of proper remedies, check their Gown
ward tendency. DR.. J. Briggs throat and lung
healer is the acme oi per(ec!Ion,f for the speedy
cure of all the diseases Of the throat, lungs ana
chest. Can be given to the infant and aged
with perfect safety, as il contains no injurious
drugs of any description. As general house
hold medicine, it is rapidly becoming indisPen-
sable. Sold BY ii. NJ Billings, Shepherdslown,
and G.. Finley Smith, Sharpsburg.
DfI ES are very common affection,
/ LIED there being but few persons who
are not troubled with them al some period Of
their life There exists in small tumors in the
reetum or about the anus, which are divided
into, 6Ist, those " hich are owing TO Cistend-
ed state Of the veins el the part; and second
those " hich present the character Of solid
tVmor When the tumors are within the rec
tum, they are called internal piles when with
out aud acouEd the anus, external When
they discharge blood, they are termed bleeding
piles; and when 10 blood appears, blind ples;
and excessive itching about the anus itching
niles. Nothing equals Briggs Pile Remedies
for their cure. Sold by H. N. Billings, Shep-
herdstown, and G. Finley Smith, SharPs6urg.
NDD = Bunions, Bad NaIIs anu all
w HNO Diseases of the Feet, Cancers
and ScroCulous Humors, Piles, &C., skilliully
and successfully treated at the great central
Healing and C6iropodcal Institute, 6sl Broad
way, New York. Sold by Il. M 3!i'ngs'
Sbephsrdsloyn, and G. Finley Smith shafps'
0urs. Dr.J. bhl1uS q ""
February IA, 1874.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

CHURCH DISCIPLINE TOUCHING TEN
pERANcE.-By a vote Of 135 20 81, the
late General Conference of the NJ. Z.
Church South, makes making, buying,
selling, or using as beverage, intoxica-
ting liquors" cause for expulsion. DIR.
Register was of opinion that the church
would be gamer by such discipline,
though it would cost them $4,000 men,
bers.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
FOR S.aLE,

2gHE Celebrated Sweepstakes Thresh.
\ ing and Cleansing Machine, regarded
as the leading Machine of lis class. \
durable Machine. Light draush'. last
'hresher, and perfect separator, IN word
complete machine.f Sold On easy
terms. Call and obtain pamphlet, and
further information.
J. S. MELVIN,
Agent for Jefferson county.
Dufields. April 4, 1874. #
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

The venerable Arcbdeacon Scott, OF
Durham, Canada East, says that he
suffered from dyspepsia more than
twenty five years, but that three weeks
use Of the Peruvian Syrup(an Iron ton
ic) has benefited him so wonderfully
that he can hardly persuade himself Of
the reality. and people who know him
are astonishsd at the change.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

BousD TO BE MAeHrED.--A CORES
pondent gives the Newton (New Hamp-
sbire) Register an account Of recent
wedding ceremony in Wspack town
ship, near Flatbrookville, in that State,
which was somewhat in this way:
A young woman Of that vicinity had
become enamorcd with young man Of
Pennsylvania birth, ,whoSbas been living
in Saltwater township for some time.
Desiring to get ''spliced" they offered q
certain local preacher living near by,
IS to do the job lie informed them,
with many regrets, that he was unau-
thorized TO perform the ceremony.
They then dispatched messenger TO u
corpulent squire residing in the hatbook
valley, who agreed 20 come and marry
them. Shortly after he arrived the mo-
ther Of the would-be bride, who had
been absent from home, returned, and
discovered the situation. Selling n
piece Of board three or four feet long
and six inches wide she proceeded TO
belabor all parties concerned. She
drove her daughter TO the garret and her
wouId-be sOn-in-law out OF doors. The
Squire began to expostulate with the
excited woman, when she sprang to-
ward him, and told him 10 leave. lie
obcyed the comm and, but when he
reached the middle Of the road he told
tho. Borrowing parties to come 20 him
and he would make them one. This
still further enraged the mother, aud
she charged upon the Squire and fore
ed him 10 flee homeward. Later 10 the
day the disappointed bride and groom
were seen together weeping and be-
wailing the state Of affairs The result
of the conference was that early the
next morning they presented themselves
before the Squire in his barnyard. lie
asked them TO 20 10 the house, but hay.
ing learned wisdom from experience.
they declined, stating that they desired
to be married on the spot, before tho
brides mother should be out ON tho
war-path. Without further delay the
twain were made one, the only living
witnesses being the cattle which sur
rounded them and which stood by chew
ing their cud.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
PRICES DOWN ! d!
GOODS BOUGHT WITHIN The
LAST FIVE DAYS AT
? A N IC P R | G b S!
GREAT BARGAINS
AT TIE
MERCHANT TAILORING
Establishment.

THE undersigned have just received from thc
l. Eastern markets one of the LARGEST,
CHEAPEST and BEST STOCKS OF GOODS
ever brought 10 tais market.
The Stock consists in par, Of superior French
and English Cloths of all colors, Casimeres and
VestlDgs, land other goods which they will sell by
the yard or make up to order. They also in-
vite attention to their Stock of
READY-MADE CLOTHING,
A FINE AND LARGE ASSORTMENT OF
FASHIONABLE HATS,
NOTIONS, and Shirts, Collars, Neck Ties,
Suspenders, Handkercbiets, &c., which they
will sell cheap for cash.
All Goods purchased elsewhere will be cut
and manufactured 10 order at short notice and
fit guaranteed.
Beaver Cloths $500 and up,
Cas>imeres IS and up,
Ready.made Goats $50 and up,
Good Cashmere Suits 1900 and Op.
Goods made up at low prices, and
fits guaranteed. Give us call.
S. P. HU UMRICKHOUSE,
JAS. S. RIGHTSTINE.
May 9 If
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

One of Nellie Grants wedding dress
es used up forty yards Of white silk at
ten dollars a yard. Mr Sartors Will
doubtless find Miss Nellie dear little
wife, if he can ever find her at all in
that dress.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
WARRANTED.


-Four to six bottles of DIR. Pierces
Golden Medical Discovery are warrant
ed to cure Salt Rheum or letter and the
worst kind of Pimples OH the face.
Two to four bottles are warranted to
clear the system Of Boils, Carbuncles and
Sores. Four to six bottles are warran-
ted to cure the worst kind Of Erysipelas
and Blotches among the hair. Six to
ten bottles are warranted to- cure Run
ming of the Ears and Corrupt or Run
ming Ulcers. Eight to ten bottles are
warranted to cure Scrofulous Sores and
Swellings. Two to six bottles are war
ranted to cure Liver Complaint
WONDER TO HERSELF
Tanktown, Delaware Co., o., March
20, 1S73-To DR.. II. V. Pierce:-Your
Discovery needs only fair trial and it
will all you recommend and more too.
When i was fifteen l caught and for
twenty eight years have been perfect
wreck of disease, and all the medicines
and doctors bills have run up at times
to two and three hunded dollars, and
never any better but worse, when l
give up all hope last spring Of living
the summer through. / received one Of
your Account Books and told my hus
band after reading it that it was to late
to try further, but he said it was never
too late. He went and bought two
bottles and / found it was helping Inc
very much. Since 1871 l was troubled
with Catarrh andESore Throat, and was
almost entirely deaf in one ear and my
voice was as dull as could be. There
was constant pain in my head. Now
my head is as sound as a dollar, my
voice is clear, and | have used ten bot
ties of your Discovery. 1t has cured
me of Catarrb, Sore Throat, Heart Dis
ease, Spine Affection and Torpid Liver.
Ny liver was very bad. Ny skin was
rough. When | put my hand on my
body it was like fish scales. Now it is
as smooth and soft as achilds. In con-
clusion l will say | have been well for
three months. / am wonder to my
self aud friends. This but an imper-
feet statement, half has not been told.
Yours with respect,
HESTER 4 TACKEY
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
MANS RIGHTS.

D. Prentice, and was written for the
latitude of Louisville, KY:
Hurrah for the rights of man.
The day of his triumph has come,
And women and children have No rights
In this glorious age Of rum i!
Rum for the laborers arm
Rum for the scholars head;
Rum for the man that lies in the street,
And the man that lies in the bed.
Drunk drunk ! drunk
On Jefferson, Market, and Main
Drunk drunk drunk
Til the lamp posts reel again.
The little girls have no bread
The boys have no shoes to their feet;
! The CRATE is as cold as the pavement
stones
The father is drunk in the street.
Drunk drunk drunk
There's whisky at every door;
There's palace for whisky on every
square,
But no shelter for the poor.
There's darkness in the halls,
The voice Of joy IS dumb :;
And the graves, and the jails, and
the lunatic cells,
Are filed with the spoils OF lum.
John Blunt worked all the week
His fortune was his time
He drew his wages Saturday night
Six dollars-eyery dime.
And as lie sought his home,
Some friendly voice did say:
''Valk in, walk in. young shentlemans,
And hear de organ play.
There was music, and gas, and wine,
But not a kind word to save ;
And on Monday morning Johns chill
dren saw
Their father sent to the Gave.
A boat has left our shores,
TIC the Southern market bound
But the pilot was drunk and the boat
was sunk.
And a hundred people were drowned.
There was whisky enough for all,
But not life boat to save;
For the beauty Of woman and strength
Of man
There was Il watery grave
Drunk drunk drunk
Let the world do all it can
Let children starve and women pray
We will not barter our rights away
TO drink is the right Of man.
TO the city fathers we call
If you have children and wives,
How can you turn your eyes away
When we plead with you for our lives!
If you have hearts of flesh,
Hear lis while we entreat
That YOU break the foul, deceiiful snare
Set for our naked feet.
If you regard us not,
And no compassion take,
When the Lord demands your stew
ardship,
What answer will you make
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

NELME's HEADS LEyEL.-It Is just
being discovered to the country that
the Presidents daughter married only
a common EDgliShman, and not titled
gentleman as at first supposed. Mr..
Motleys search among the archives de
monstrates that the Sartoris family
does not possess any titular evidence OF
nobility, though its dignity and antiqui-
ty are fully established. We presume
Miss Nellie and her parents knew as
much long since. An empty title
should have no attractions for an Amer
ican girl, nor yet the antiquity OF a
family; and presulning upon a full
knowledge Of the facts, we are disposed
to accord to Miss Grant sounder dis
cretion and more genuine American
womanhood than We bad reasonable
right TO expect, reared and trained as
she has been in school Of centralism,
in the circles Sf Washington, latter-day
aristocracy, surrounded with gold lace
and epaulettes, and courted perhaps by
men of every rank, Hnrrah for Nellie!
her father is. prohibited from conferring
titles of nobility, and she has acted well
and wisely in introducing none such IN
to an American presidents family.
Common blood is the very kind to mix
with that Of a country which breeds
nothing uncommon.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

A Detroit paper, noticing the fact
that man had lately dropped dead
while combing his hair, says, ..ADd yet
there are people who will persist in this
dangerous habit.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

Nearly all the drinking places in
Lockport, n. Y, closed on Monday
last, the Board Of Excise having refused
TO renew their licenses.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

During the session Of the Dominion
Parliament, just closed, petitions bear
ing 1857 signatures were presented,
asking for a prohibitory liquor law.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
ours with respect,
HESTER A. LACKEY
SATURATE A PIECE OF BREAD

SATURATE a PlECE OF BREAD
OR MEAT with gastric juice, and it
wiH dissolUe. This is digestion. Add
to such mixture little alcohol, and it
will NOT dissolue This is indigestion.
Beware, then, of tinctures, or touics, or
decoctioEs containing spirituous liquors.
Shun all rum ''tonics," and rely solely
on DR.. Walkers Vinegar Bitters, the
finest digestive invigorant known, and
free from the fiery curse of Alcohol.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

The west is great country. "A Min
nesota farmer lost gimlet three years
ago. The other day he cut down Tree
near his barn, found in i a three guar.
Ter inch asger. This il not as good a.
the irlshman who boosted that be had
the best gun IN Ameriky, for he'd own
ed i ever since IT was little pistol.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

Presbyterian elder weighing zoe,
and an s.Ironside Baptist" ei2t 'three :
years old, rode horsebact - Inkc(
at Salem, Virginia. +. 4 -. + s,
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
SOMETHIVG NEW !!

Z HAVE determined 10 keep "Circu-
4 la,ing Library" OF The latest publca.
,ions. which The reading public can uss
at2O cents a volume, moi to be kept Ion.
ger than five days. or if retained longer
a, an additional charge Of ten cents per
day. None but the bee. and latest " Orks
will be bought.
JAS. E. BARNHART.
Nav 3 1t
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
COUNTY, WEST VIRGINIA. SATURDAY, JUNE b. 1874
THE moTHERIN HEAVEN.

In turning over some old papers III
country attic some time since, L came
across the following sentiments, which,
from some hints by the author accom-
panying, think he intended eventually
TO put into verse They struck me
ever in prose, as expressing the cry
from so many hearts, that | have ven
tured to copy them ::and send them to
you, hoping that YOU may find place
for them i'll your paper
When the heart is oppressed with
anxious cares, when the world looks
cold and drear, when black disappoint-
ments hang heavy round our necks, and
we hunger after 4 love that seems ever
to recede, whittier do our souls turn for
succor? To that mother in Heaven
who never failed rs while here.
When our hearts ache to find our
selves no longer needed to partake in
the pleasures of our children-scarcely
welcome even to share in their sorrows ;
when cold duty takes the place of the
hearts offerings in sickness or suffering,
to whom do we cast our eyes upwards,
thinking, oh, were she here whom
should we find ever at our slde7 Our
mother in Heaven.
When those we love have gone astray,
and language fails to express the bitter
shame when the little feet whose first
totterng steps we have upheld, or
watched through the firmer strides OF
youth and manhood, have turned into
devious paths, needless OF entreaty or
prayer, whittier do we turn, longing to
rest our weary heads on tue bosom that
ewes answered our cry for sympathy =!
The mother in Heaven.
When years have passed, and we are
left alone, children gone, some separa-
ted by seas or mountains, Others by the
greater distance of coldness or forget
fulness. whose voice then comes back to
us with the loving tones we valnly long
to hear once more ? The dear mother
in Heaven.
Is not the wish wrung from us, that
once again we were children TO be clasp
ei in that warm embrace Do not the
bitter tears come rs ne remember how
unmindful we were of the rich mother
ly blessings while we had them!
Oh, We who still have mothers to feel
for you in your joys or your SORROWS
remember. however your hearts may
change, theirs never do; the mothers
heart is the one thing that never grows
old Amid the trial that must be our
portion in this world, good Being has
sent to all one blessing-one love purer
than all others. Happy are those who,
with anguish aud remorse, do not have
10 say. Il is nnr molher in Heaven.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13
Save Doctors Bills.

liyou wan, 10 keep from paying many
doctors bills. keep bottle or two OF
ENTLEPS SURE CURE in your
house. 1, will cure Dsrrhes, Cholera,
Cholera Morbus. Dysen.eIy. Cramp Col
ic, Summer Complaint in children &c.
A sure remedy For sale by
II. Nj. BILLINGS.
Druggist,
Shepberdstown.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1874-06-13

4 BOYS COMPOSITION OK Girls
Girls are the most unaccountablc things
in the word-eXcept women. Like
the wicked ticas, when You have them
they amt there. ! can cipher clean o
vei to improper fractions, and the tea
cher saws DO it iirst-rate, but / can
cipher out a girl, proper or improper
and YOU can't either. The only rule III
arithmetic that hits their case is the dou-
bic rule of two. They are rs full Of the
Old Nick as their skins can hold, and
they would die if they couldn't torment
somebody. When they try to be mean
they are as mean as purseley, though
they amt as mean rs they let on to be-
excert sometimes, and then they are u
great deal meaner. The oEly to get 4
long with a girl when she comes with
her nonsense is to give her tit for tat,
and that will hummux her and when
you get a girl fummuXed she is as nice
as new pie. y girl can SOW more
wild oats in 4 day than boy can IN n
wear, but girls get their wild oats sowed
after while, which boys never do, and
then they settle down as calm and plac-
id as a mud-puddle. But | like girls
iirst-rate and guess all the boys do. !
don't care how many tricks they play
on me-and they don't care either.
The hoity-toi,icst girl in the world can
not always boil over like a glass of So
da. BY and by they will get into the
traces with somebody they like and
pull as steady as an old stage
horse. That is the beauty of them.
So let them wave, say they will pay
for it some day, sewing on buttons, aud
trying to make decent man Of the fel-
low they have spliced on to and ten
chances to one if they don't get the
worst Of it,
The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1874-12-17
American Pork IN England. !.

The Amer .can Agricultarist says
We ought to produce the best pork,
lard, and hams in the world, and Sc
cure the highest prices in the English
market. Instead Of this, Irish hams
are quoted in London q. - to "A cents
per pound, and American hams at l3 to
Is cents. And there is corresponding
difference in the price Of pork | asked
Mr.. DeVoe, eur largest pork packer.
what was the reason American pork
sold so low in Europe. '1Vot is the rea-
son." said he, II will tell yos Why. We
think they are vools over there. We
think anything is good enough for
them. Pork that We would not eat here
We ship to Europe. / sent several bar
rels Of pork IS present to my frie nds
in Germany, and they said it sas most
excellent, but that most Of the Ameri-
can pork they got vas vile stuff. The
Captain Of steamer running from
Hamburg to New York, vonce gave his
crew American pork ON their return
voyage. Great vas the grumbling
And ven they got to Hamburg they re-
fused to continue on the ship until the
captain had given them . written agree
ment. to never again give them Ameri
can pork
The anti-monopolist. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1874-1878, 1874-12-17
PrOcraStinatiOn.

swell, John," said Mrs. P, morn
ing ago. when the mercnr Y was with
in fraction Of zero, ''those beets and
things in the garden are. ruined; and
we must 60 without item this winter.
It would have taken less than half
day to have saved them, and you
should have left OK corn husking when
l wanted you to, and put them in the
cellar "Well.. Jane, know that is
so,'' said Mr.. P, a little crestfallen;
ssbut l did not think that it would
freeze that night, and | wanted to
finish tlAat field of corn that was at.
.sYou kuow, John, that freezing of the
cord would not harm it; and that the
cutting off Of this work has lost us the
vegetables that VIC SO much need. Last
year, half of the potato cron was lost
in the same way. The fact is, John,
you must make up your mind to look
after those small things in time, as | DO
not like to 60 without vegetables
during the winter,-at least, after 1t
has been so much trouble to grow them.
-E.rchdnge.