The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1874-03-28
THE RING.

! THE KING.
"ltinerant writes to the american
from the State capital about the ring"
"RINGs, SIR
he said, care great institution-the
proudest achievement of modern political
science and economy. A new, wide, deec-
table and glorious field for the exercise of
the mental powers of the modern patriot
and philanthropist, which promises greatly
to simplify the intricacies and uncertainties
of public affairs, and save the people all
the trouble and anxiety they have hereto
fore experienced in managing their own
affairs. Recent experiments made in Mary
land, and that, too, on most extensive
scale, have resulted in the most triumphant
success, and leave little doubt in the mind
of the inventors that the same machinery,
with occasional repairs-always to be made
however, at the public expense-will last
for an indefinite time, and do the work
equally well.
1t is all-important, however, that the
material of which a ring is composed
should be suitable for the purpose. A
watch is not all of one kind of metal,
neither is any other complicated piece of
machinery. You must have ir ring
every kind of material that may be neces-
sary to meet every emergency of public
necessity, and acceptable to every element
in society. Your head centre, or Ring
Master, had better be piously inclined, at
least before the eyes of the world. 1t gives
character, you know, to the whole arrange
ment. If he eschews smoking, chewing
and swearing, and withal abstains from
strong drink, and assumes an air of min
isterial gravity, it is still better; and better
than all should he be chosen to any posi-
ton of honor or trust in the State, when
he assumes the onerous responsibility of
his office and takes the oath required by
the law, let him add at its conclusion the
further assurance that he believes in the
Christian religion
THE HEAD CENTRE.
"For successful Lead-centre ola ring,
you must have rare material In him must
w SohiDibCu an bilc CIcIutulS ltuulSltG lOT
the preparation of any political vilainly
essential to success, and at the same time
he must be capable of presenting to the
public generally the aspect of a remarkably
disinterested, unsophisticated, hat-in-h hand,
kerchiefeye- wiping, humble servant of the
people. If he be in position with patron
age to dispense, he must be capable of pro-
missing the same position to one dozen
different men at the same time, convince
each that he is entirely sincere to him,
their required service before he unmasks
his ultimate purpose. He must be plausi-
BILE in manner. abundant in resources, and
ready in their use to pull the wool over
the eyes of the unwary, and even send a
disappointed office-seeker from his presence
profoundly convinced that the very best has
been done in his behalf that could be done,
and that the said official is panied to the
very heart at not being able to crafty him.
We have had such a head centre hero
among us, and it would astonish you to
see with what mute admiration and sub
dued patriotism a disappointed place hun
ter, though having the strongest claims of
fitness, merit and ancestral nobility, has
fallen orderly into the lines again, and
keeps time to the music of the chief fid-
dler. "
"But, " said !. "this is passing strange,
indeed. Do you mean to say that such
men can be elevated to high positions of
honor and trust in the State? The time
was, and that not long ago either, when
the men of Maryland who held such
places were heightened pure and relia-
ble.'
ooh, yes know that. They were
what you call gentlemen of the old school,
We call them fossils" A few only still
survive amongst us-curiously preserved
specimens of the carboniferous era. There's
Teackle Wallis, for instance. He's speci-
men. Now, what use do you suppose we
could make of him. There's no place that
would fit him, and none that he would fit.
Indeed, he would greatly derange the run
ming of the machinery, and run the whole
lldlu ol tut lIdCh luC iSJ tiiIlo II SCclHCu
to diverge from the old accustomed route.
tell you, sir, politics is politics, business
is business, and we want none but business
men, and thoroughly up in all the modern
ideas of political progress. There is an
abundance of the very best material for
such purposes in our State. Maryland
seems particularly favored in this particu-
lar, as she is in many other natural pro-
auctions. If you should want a few choice
spirits to organize successful ring in any
other State we could spare you a few, and
perhaps not be the worse off. The fact is,
our ranks are sometimes a little crowded,
and it puts us to our trumps to find profit
able employment for all.
"Around this, the great lumnary of
this mystic, you must have goodly num-
Der of lesser lights. revolving at various
distances to reflect the effugence of the
great light and equipoise the system
Each of these satellites fills its own special
orbit and performs it's allotted mission.
The grave, the gay, the pious and the dis
solute elements of society must all be rep
resented, for all have influence and control
votes at the popular elections.
"In our management of affairs here
this is MISREPRESENTATION should have at
least one native, live born Irishman. His
blarney has magic effect upon the coun-
try members, intoxcates them with ad-
miration of their own Importance and in
huence, and carries them off captive before
they become conscious of the cheat. Two
or three cold water men too you must have
in these local option times. They secure
the support and confidence of that large
and respectable element in society, and
being always clear-headed and cool, they
are enabled to pick up many items of
information, let slip in unguarded mo-
ments by the opposition, when they may
have perchance, imbibed too freely of the
intoxicating cup. You must have also
mon of all nreyiouS political exper;ences