The Lake County star. [volume] (Chase, Mich.) 1873-current, 1874-07-30

The Irish have achieved great celeb
rity i'm the matter of bulls and plumbers.
By the uninitiated, these are terms which
are constantly confounded but, when
they are looked into, it will be seen there
is the greatest difference between them.
Blundering arises from stupidity, and
the stupid are race who are found all
over the world; but the bull-a pecu-
liarity that belongs exclusively to Ire
land, is always connected with thought,
and originates i'm the imaginative power
of its people. 1t is not at all dull alb
surdity which no one can comprehend
it is always comprehensive, even when
it is most confused. IT proceeds, not
from want, but the superabundance OF
ideas, which crowd on each other so fast
in an Irishman's pericranium that they
get jammed together, so to speak, In the
doorway of his speech, and only tumble
out in their ordinary disorder.
Confusion may, indeed, be called
national characteristic. 1t pervades all
Irish history. If the stream of the lat
ter in early days had its CLEANS of bright
tranquility, sorely troubled does it be-
come rs it descends the sleeps of time,
till, as it flows on in latter ages, it en-
counters distractions, political and re-
ligious, which gave it a turmoil and per-
plexity that we cannot survey without
deploring. As with the affairs Of I'M
happy Ireland, so has it ever been with
the pleasantly. Public and social disor-
ders have communicated a jar to the
brains of Pat; and, if he can be accused
now and then of being little cratic in
his sayings and doings, he can mt least
console himself by pointing to long his
torical authority. He may say
A,rah! now, why wouldn't l be con-
fused? Wasn't all of us confused, and
from TIE earliest times, and isn't man
to be consistent? Would you have him
turn his coat when scarcely rag of it is
left him p
A good example of bull may be cited
i'm the case of two Irshmen, who, fancy
ing that they knew each other, crossed
the street to shake hands. On discover
ing their error:
az beg your pardou!" cried the one.
ooh, don't mention it," said the other
cts a mutual mis!ate; you see ]
thought it was you, aud you thought il
was me, and, after oil, it was neither o
usp
A good pendant to this is told of two
friends who met, and referred to the illness
of third.
"Poor Michael Hoganl Faith I'm
afraid he's going to die"
"And why would he dep
ooh, he's got so thin! You're thin
enough, and Pm thin--but by my soul
Michael Hogan is thinner than both o
us put together!
A bull is sometimes produced by thu
false use of word, as in the case of al
Irish Waterman giving evidence at ;
police court.
"What is this mans offense ?"
" He was disorderly, your worship, il
the strates, last night"
"And did you give him warming before
you took him into custody %
"Id did, your worship. l said to HIM
Disparsem
Again, bull may be occasioned by
confusion of identities---as when it wa
said of an ugly men, that he was hand
: some when an infant, but w3s unluckil,
changed at nurse; or, as il was shown il
the fervOr of girl, who desiring he
, lovers miniature, anu he fearing it nigh
! lead to discovery
f ooh it needn't" she exclaimed "Pl
: tell the painter not to make it like you!
? And again, bull may be owing to
limited amount of knowledge--as in tn
case of an old woman going to the chano
ler's for farthing candle, and being toll
it was raised to a halfpenny on accOun
of the Russian war:
5 Bad luck to them p she exclaimed
; "and do they fight by candle-light ?"
I "Apart, however, from all these, tn
ordinary sayings of the irish have a
imaginative quality which is JUS as chal
c acteristic, and not at all confusing. A
e for instance, when they say of a ma
: whe is irretrievably ruined:
2 "Saltpetre wouldn't save him, and tina
e is strong pickle;" or when they woul
L advise another to avoid arrest: "Be o
, while your shoes are good!" or, as the
delicately say of an elderly lady, who's
$ numberof years they forbear to mention
: "a kitten of her age wouldn't play with
4 cork"
: And apart from all these, again, is til
e genuine humor of the Irish, which hs
4 nothing of the b, II in it whatever, br
4 on the contrary, The clearest notions, an
n very often the shrewdest sense. l wi
only cite couple of instances, whic
will not be the less welcome if they hal
pen to have been heard before:
I A gentleman, seeing an Irishman sta!
$ gering home from fair, and observin
to him:
"Ah, Darby, Pm afraid you'll find I'll
road you're going is rather longer Oh
. . than you think"
"Sure, your honor" he replied, ait
not the length of the road l care abou
e it's the breadth of it is destroyin' me-"
I And again, in the bog of Aughrim,
the last century, plenty of gun-barre
:, used to be found as a memento of i
! great battle, and there was blacksmit
who dug them up in order to make u'
Il of their material. On one occasion OF
: of them exploded in his furnace, when |
J exclaimed
$ "Bad luck to your love of murthel
Isn't the battle of Aughrim out of yo
), yetY'