Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1874-12-31


told him was putin up, and I was
SO clean tuckered out that said to
the man behind the big desk, said 1,
Sir, will you be so kind as to hurry
up tea, cause it pears to me cup of
tea will cheer my spirits little mite
He only looked at me kind of impu-
dent, and knew it twarnt no use to
arger with him on that pint, so I didn't :;
but would you believe it them wait
ers never rang the tea bell till I was
nigh starved. The next day 1 went
out agin, but when l got as far as the
steps 1 kincluded to stay to hum, for
tear of getting insulted agin, and, oh
my what an awful long day that was
to be sure!
Wal, to make my story short, I
thought I'd rather, on the hull be to
hum amendin' of Lots trouser leg snd
feedln' the caow critter than to be a
tryln' to cultivate my style in New
York Town, and so put my Sunday
gown back inter the trunk (and la !!
how SLED it was, gals! nigh cried
to see the dirt on IT'D and my bunnit
inter the bandbox (oh, gals, if yoa
could a seee how tumbled it was !)and
then 1 went down and told the clerk I
was goin' hum. bid him good by as
perlite as I new how, sez, sez I, I'm
obleeged to ye, I'm sure, Mister, for
yer politeness. Tve enjoyed myself
very considerable since l came Then
| ontied my han'kercher and give him
dollar for my putin up Bless me,
gals, how he did stare! I dassent tell
ye what he said; it would make yer
tears come to think how he treated a
defenceless old pusson like me. I had
to give that creetur well nigh all nv
money afore I could get out of his
tavern. L hadn't none left except jest
to get back to my hum with. and,
laws hadn't bought a present or
nothin' for Lot, except stick of
chawin' gum I bough of feller in the
road rite in front of the big tavern. 1
forgit what they call the road now
big, wide place, you know, where
lots and lots of hollerin' is goin' on,
and the men and beast critters is al
lers tryin' to get in each other S
way, as it pears, There were sights
and sights of fine folks a perambula-
tim in this road and admirin' OF
tharselves in the big lookin' glasses
of the shops. | see SO many look
in in one of them glasses, or winders
whatever they was, that think I to my
self, 'pll see if my bunnit is on rite
and law saEes if it warn't all knocked
sideways, and the big rose what ought
ter been in front like was away to the
back of my head. So 1 laid my UNI
brill down and sot my bag on it, and
off with my bunnit and combed my
hair with my fine tooth comb, which
alters carry in my pocket, and should
hev got on first eff the sassy boys
had a left me alone. They KEEP F..
larfn' and larfn', till it warnt no use
for me to try to fix my hair before
that winder; so I put my bunnit or
and picked up my duds and came
away. But then, gals, this was be
fore I said gOod-by to the tavern
keeper. Where was I? Le'me see
Oh! I was tellin' Cf ye how 1 ken
hum. Wall, I was driv to the keers
and paid the driver another dollar
Oh dear me! Then had to be rat
tied away over the road agin; but
didn't get into smokin' keer thi
time, mind, I tell ye! KEEP think
in all the time how glad Lot would b.
to see me to hum agin, and I sighed
sigh of satisfaction when at last tht
engine stopped rite to the spot whar
gout out. am free to confess to We
gals, that my old body was lame anc
stiff for many day arter that trip ,anC
1 didn't keer about goin' about mucl
you see. Lot he was powerful glat
when walked in upon him. But ht
was so beat when 1 telled him my
story that he larfed that ere larf O
his'n till was that riled l well nigl
slapped him-a thing amt done gal
for this twenty year.
Wall, gals, Pm done now. S'pos
yell larf a sight when ye get hum
but ye may eff ye've min ter. AL
1 say is, I've seen all of New Yorl
Town I want ter see, and do enjoy
my vittles a site better to hum, where
I can eat till I'm clean filled up with
out havin' my plate drawed away afor
I'm nigh through; and I feel free tt
confess it's q comfort to get up an
smooth myself once in while, withou
being scarf lest sassy man behinC
should draw my chair away. I aim
sot down hard onto the floor since
KEN back, and it's a massy my oil
bones wasn't bruk that day at the tay
ern.
La! how late it is, to be sure. Good
by, gals. My! Augusty Brown, doe
yer ma allow of yer to wear sech lon
dresses trailin' in the dirt? Ain
they awful hard to wash? p