The Van Buren press., 1874-12-29

cXcrciseu u STCab .iliuucucc o'ca NY. p
followed my msther sulkily, till VIC
reached the spot where we now stand
beneath the shadow Of this huge rock
Oh my boy, could that honr be blottcd
from my memory, which has cast dark
shadow over my whole life, gladly would
l exchange all that the world can offer
me for the quiet peace OF mind should
enjoy But no like this huge, unsightly
pile, stands the monument OF my guilt
forever,
"My mother, being feeble in health
sat down, and beckoned me to sit down
beside her. Her look, so full OF tender
sorrow, is present to me now. l would
not sit, but continued standing sullenly
beside her alfred, ~ dear son. said
she, have you lost all love for your
motherf' did not reply, Il fear you
have, she continued and may God
help you to see your own heart, and me
10 do my dutyr She then talked to me
of nv misdceds; Of the dreadful consc
quences Of the course | was pursuing
BY tears and entreaties and prayers, she
tried to make an impression on me. She
placed before me the examples Of great
and good men; she sought to stimulate
my ambition. was moved; but too
proud to show it, and remained standing
in dogged silence beside her l thought
What will my companions say, after all
my boasting; l yield a, last, aud submit
to be led by woman
"What agony was visible on my mo-
theI's face, when she saw that all she
said and suffered, failed to move me She
rose to go home, and followed at dis
tance. She spoke no more until we
reached our own door
80 It's school-time, now said she.
{ Go, my son, and once more let me be
seech you to think on what | have said
a. ! shan't 60 to school, said !.
"She looked astonished at my bold
ness, but replied firmly Certainly you
will go, Alfred command you
al will not, said i, with tone of def
ance.
"'One Of the two things you must do,
Alfred, either 90 to school this moment,
or / will lock you in your room and
keep you there till you are ready to prom
ise implicit obedience to my wishes, in
future
al dare you to do it, said !. You
can't get me up stairs.
"Alfrcd, choose now, said my mother,
as she laid her hand upon my arm, She
trembled violently, and was deadly pale,
If you touch me, will kick you,
said |, in a terrible rage. God knows |
knew not what said
"Wil you go, Alfred Z"
"'No,' replied, but quailed beneath
her eyes
"' Then, follow mc' said she, as she
grasped my arm firmly. raised my foot
oh. my son, hear me IL raised my
foot and kicked her, my sainted mother.
How my head reels, as the torrent of
memory rushes over me. kicked my
mother-a feeble woman-my mother
She staggered back a few steps, and
leaned against the wall. She did not look
at me. | saw her heart beat against her
breast, 'Oh Heavenly Father she cried,
: forgive him. lie knows not what he
does The gardener just then passed the
door, and seeing my mother pale and al
most unable to support herself, he
stopped. She beckoncd him in. Take
this boy up stairs, and lock him in his
own room said she, and turned from
me Looking back, as she was entering
her room, she gave me such look. 1t
will forever follow me. 1t was look OF
agony, mingled with the intensest love.
1t was the last unutterable pang from a
heart that was broken.
"ln moment found myself pris-
oner in my own room. thought, for a
moment would fling myself from the
window, and dash my brains ont; but |
felt afraid to die, ! was not penitent At
times, my heart was subdued, but my
stsbborn pride rose in an instant, and
bade me not to yield. The pale face OF
my mother haunted me. flung myself
on the bed and fell asleep. woke at
midnight, stifened by the damp night air,
terrified with frightful dreams. | would
have sought nv mother, at that moment,
for trembled with fear; but my door
was fast With the daylight my tcrrors
were dissipated. and | became bold in re-
ssting all good impulses. The servant
brought my meals, but | did not taste
them. thought the day would never
end. just at twilight heard a light foot
step approach the door twas my Sis
ter who called me by name.
"'What may | tell mother from you ?
she asked
Z" Nothing ! replied. y.
"Oh Alfred, for my sake, for all
our sakes, say you are sorry. She longs
to forgive you
"'I won't be driven to school against
my will said |,
But you will go il she wishes it,
dear Alfred said my sister, plcadingly
"No, won't said l. and you
needn't say a word more about it,
:" Oh! brother, you will kill her! you
will kill her! And then you will never
have happy moment.
al made no reply to this My feelings
were touched, but still | resisted their
influence. My sister called me, but
would not answer heard her footsteps
slowly retreating and again l flung my
self on the bed, to pass another wretched
and fearful night Oh, God how fearful
and how wre,ohed, did not know.
"Another footstcp, slowet and fccbler
than my sisters, disturbed me. A voice
crled me by name. 1t was my mothers
".Alfred, my son, shall ! come in
Are you sorry for what you have done 2