The Grange advance., 1874-05-06

that poetry in a shape which would
make the stricken family feel proud of
the corpse. When his days work was
done OFT went home with a conviction
that The Morning Glory had finally rob-
bed Death of its terrors, and made life
comparatively valueless.
In the morning Mr.. OFT proceeded
calmly to the Office for the purpose of
embalming in sympathetic verse the men,
cries of other departed ones. AS he
came near to the establishment he ob-
served crowd of five or six thousand
people in front of it: struggling to get
into the door. Climbing tree, he ov-
er!ooked the crowd, and could see within
the Office the clerks selling papers as fast
as they could handle them, while the
mob pushed and jammed and yelled in
frantic efforts to obtain copies - the
presses in the cellar meanwhile changing
away like mad. Upon the curbstone in
front Of him there was line of men
stretching down the street for four
squares, each man engaged in reading
The Morning Glory with an earnest
ness that Mr.. OFT had never before seen
displayed by the patrons of that sheet -
The bard concluded that either his po-
etry had touched sympathetic chord in
the popular heart, or that an appalling
disaster had occurred in some quarter Of
the globe
He went around to the back Of the
office and ascended to the editorial rooms.
As he approached the sanctum loud
voices were heard within. Mr.. OFT de-
termined to ascertain the cause before
entering. He obtained a chair, and,
placing it by the side door, he mounted
and peeped over the door through the
transom. There sat J. Alfred Brimmer
holding The Morning Glory in both
hands, while the fringe which grew in a
semi-circle around the edge of his bald
head stood straight out, until he seemed
to resemble gigantic gun-swab. Two
or three persons stood in front of him in
threatening attitudes. OFT heard one of
them say:
my name is McGlue, sir !-William
McGlue! I am brother Of the late AL
exander McGlue. I picked up your
paper this morning and perceived in it
an outrageous insult to my deceased
relative, aud have come around to de-
mand sir, what do you mean by the
following infamous language?
the dessh-ansol smote Alexander McG,ue,
And gave him prot1acted Repose:
He wore checked shirt and : Number Nine shoe,
And be had pink wart on his nose
No doubt he is happier dwelling in space
Over there on the green shore.
His friends a.e informed that his funeral takes place
Precisely at quarter past four"
"This is simply diabolical! MY late
brother had no wart on his nose, sir.
He had upon his nose neither pink
wart nor green wart, nor a cream
colored wart, nor wart of any color.
It is slander! 1t is a gratuitous in
suit to my family, and I distinctly want
you to say echot you mean by such con-
Duct
"Really, SIR" said Brimmer, cit is
a mistake. This is the horrible work
Of an incendiary miscreaut whom /
trusted as a brother He shall be pun.
ished by my own hand for this outrage
A pink wart! Awful, sir-awful! The
miserable scoundrel shall suffer for this
he shall, indeed -
"How could I know" murmured
OFT, out there BY himself, "that the
corpse hadn't pink wart? I used to
know man named McGlue, and h
had one, and thought all the McGlue.
had: This comes Of irregularities il
families
| And who." said another man, ad
dressing the editor, q authorized you t,
print this hideous stuff about my de
ceased son? Do you mean to say tina
:, it was not with your authority that your
low comedian inserted with my adver
tisement the following scandaious bur
lesque? Listen to this:
"'Wille had purple monkey climbing on yello,
And when he sucked the paint all of it made hir
And in his latest hours he clasped that monkey in hi
| hand,
And bid goodbye to earth and went into bette
Oh no more he'll shoot his sister with his litt
wooden gun;
And no more he'll twist the pussys tail, and max
her yowl for fun.
The pussys tail now stands out straight; the gun
laid aside:
: The monkey doesn't jump around since little Will
died.
1.-The utterly atrucious character G
this bladderdash will appear when I sa
: that William was twenty years old, tina
he never had purple monkey on