Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1874-07-04
Beginning Life.

A great deal of the future happiness
of welded pairs depends on how the
beginning is made. The first thing the
new relation demands, says the 7y'i-
6,me, is that the newly married pair be
left entirely to themselves in the regu-
lation of their domestic matters. Every
married man and woman has learned
full we'll that the ways of their house
holds and Of the households in which
they were reared cannot be in all re-
spects the same, and room must be
given for each to assume the form its
own peculiar laws of growth impose.
So we would have tbs young couple
set up housekeeping entirely by, them
selves, where there will be no specta-
tors, no meddlers with their loves or
their jars, and where they may have the
most perfect opportunity of adjusting
their lives and themselves each to the
other W II MH
A married woman, however dutiful
she MAJ have been as daughter, soon
finds that she has positive opinions of
her own with regard to the ordering of
her household, the rearing of her chill
dren, and the-how shall we,phrase it I?
tho management of her husband.
These opinions, more likely than other
wise, do not harmonize in every particu-
lar with those OF her mother. The mar
ried man early becomes aware that he
cannot train. his wife, map out his life,
and conduct his affairs in the precise
way his father did, and he is forced to
mark out his course for himself. All
this should be provided for at the out
set by making the young people as far
as possible quite independent OF all
outside influence. In every true mar
riage the oneness of the flesh is but a
type of the unity of soul, and either
half should constantly exeTclse over the
other supervision, spiritual, intellec,
tual, and moral, so that the union here,
which lasts at the longest but few
brief years, may be followed by one
hereafter that shall know no end. This
management, this training is the only
secret each has from the other. and is
seen only in it's results. tFs
There are not wanting instances
where father and son, mother and
daughter, with their respective. fami-
lies, live together in harmony; but by
living with the old people young people
have burdens to carry which never be-
longed to them, and the bearing of
these burdens does not in many cases
make life easier to their parents.
1t is we'll for young married people
to know just what they have to depend
on pecuniarily, that they may by wise
thrift not only make their income cover
expenses but lay up little for a. rainy
day. A married man who remains an
underling forfeits in a great measure
his own self-respect, and feels that he
possesses but a mutilated and half
developed manhood. Better a little
that is ones own than great riches in
expectation. .a..s. ut'53s
The general principles underlying
success in domestic life, the causes of
bankruptcy and failure, it is very well
for young married people to discuss
freely with their parents and friends,
but the particular application of these
principles can best be made by each in
dividual family for itself. The inter
ference of friends here frequently works
mischief. Sidney Smith wittily re-
marked that man and his wife were
like pair of scissors, no one could come
between them without being cut. I'm
wise are those who make the hazardous
experiment.
Two souls walking the path of life
together, each loving the other better
than self, intent on bearing equally the
common burdens of existence, and
gathering all the joys that naturally
spring from the welded union. of con-
genial hearts, need not fear the pinch
of poverty, the reverses Of outrageous
fortune, or what as often as either of
these causes hearts to drift apart, the
unclouded sunshine of prosperity.