davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

ONE hot Sabbath recently Methodist minis
ter Of Troy remarked to a friend, before entering
the pulpit, that if he preached as he felt, be
would make hell his theme.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

SCENE in school-Boy to lady visitor-"Teach-
er, there's a girl over there winkin' at me p
Teacher-"Well, then, don't look at he.w Boy
=" But if don't look at her she'll wink at some
body slser'
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

WHEN Michigan woman taken from the
cow-catcher of locomotive upon which she had
been caught and carried half mile she said
with feeling al was just scooped up like gosh al
mighty, wasn't II"
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

In screwing nuts into any part of machinery
in cold weather. be careful not to heat them first
with the hands, or they will contract after be-
ing screwed on tight, and become immoysble
afterwards.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

THEY have a tradition in the CatskiIl noun
tains that when an Albany deacon goes there for
trout, the fish require him to produce certificate
of good character before they will bite.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

ado you drink hale in American" asked az
English cockney.
"No, we drink thunder and lightning" said the
Yankee.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

and smoked his first cigar the other evening, had
to give up the hat presently-he says it made
him sick
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

"YEs, sir" said a Michigan Fourth of July or.
ator, Putnam went right into the VOLTS den
dragged her ont, and the independence of Amer,
lea was secured
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

,,woz-ILETTER-HEADS BILLHEADS. ENVELOPES
nun IhLf.STATEMENT BLANKS and all sueh Won \
eAecuiea In the beat stvle At the Chit "ffee-
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

THE comet has extracted the following comm
drum: Why is the comet like a cows tailf Be-
cause of its close proximity TO the milky way.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

DoN'F kill the toads. Watch one of them in
your garden, il you want to know how usefnl they
are, and how destructive TO the gsrdener's enc
mics.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

Tom, what in the world put matrimony in
your headi Well, the fact is, was getting
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

THIS is given as Delaware obituary: "His hal
wasn't always cooked over his left ear, but he
didn't owe a butcher in town."
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10
SAMARITAN
SPEEDILY CURED,

An Chronic Private and Venerea Dseases of both
At reasonable prices Young men who are .n1r;n, g.
debility sP rmatorrhGa seminal veaksess
weak nervous exhausted feeling energy low spirits
coniaseo weak memory nocturnal Involuntary
minal EMISSIONS with loss Of power impotency ropor
rbha a, sypnihs. geea &C. permanently cured
Ameted females married single can eonsult mn, per
% oy letter about any of their difcuIties with the
srictIx speedy relief All private canmunications
journal Of health complete treats IN III ehroD,e p
lecture ON diseases Of both Ais short
nave and should he without n II is nee all
1 H"ursss ok A RICHMOND, (P. o. Box Iily 81
EatlI mo- once on Francis Street. opposite the Paeine
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

sUNDAY-scHooL teacher-"Next Sunday we'll
i nave The death of Moses" overjoyed pupil
"Then he did die at lastr
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

"WoULD you like to smoke upon your death
bed is the last argument addressed by anti-to-
bacco men to consumers of the weed.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

CREMATION by sun process is the name for SUM-
stroke, this summer.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

&f q day guaranteed to Agents- Address G. N.
~so Sullivan Co, 81 Paul ST. Baltimore Nd
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

Take cucumbers not quite half grown, and keep
them in salt water for day and night. Then fill
your jar with them, lay ing them smooth and
nice; Thea take good apple vinegar and pour it
over them boiling hot. Throw in some red pep
per, also, if you wish. Now seal them up, and
in few days they will be good as ever were ca
ten.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10
al q d q . 9 9

or IN Sg per dayi Agent: yssssa ~. 1OuHs "a
% " S6U working pesPs Of s;Ios hi. III. ,pss TOmsn
ar an he time than at anything else frSIeEL
Address g. Srrxsox Co, Portland Aaine
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

rThe Trio at the End Of the First Act
Br" s."
NV. B-pesr rntor what wish to say.
Before 60 to bed.
state in my impulsiye way
i wish that were dead
T-Friend Beecber. grace be unto thee;
But in what you have said.
You have anticipated me
wish that were dead
FM-I hold such secrets in my mind
They almost turn my head;
And on the whole, i am inclined
To wish that were dead.
&C $50 then the question comes again,
To bother and perplex ye;
II every one Of these three men
Expected "apoplexy,
How much more wise to change the tune,
To take the other horn,
And wish what would have been boom
That uey had ne ey been born!
THE NEW BROOKLYN HYMN.
Adapted from Tennyson-l
he ouly said my life is dreary.
1t endeth not" he said:
he said, Il am aveary, aweary,
And would that were dead"
Trio, by q. W. b. T. T. and F.D.M:
I'VE are all aweary aweary
And we would that we dead"
Grand chorus, by the public, sung fortssimo and dis
gustissimo:
We all horribly sweary.
Why in thunder amt you deadf"
'
PLYMOUTH LOGIC.
Susan Is.
Anthony she
Went and sat down on TheodOre's knee.
Thus you see,
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

KEEPING EGGS GOOD IN WARM WEATHER.
As fast as you gather them put them in your
salt barrel covered with the salt. This l dc
every summer and always have sound eggs.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10
The fun Of tue Ching.
THE BROOKLYN OPERA.


rrhs Trio at the End of the First Act.l
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10

Susan B.
Anthony, she
Went and sat down on TheOdore's knee.
Thus you see,
III. W. b.
Never said nothin' TO 'Lizabeth I.
The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1874-09-10
THE NEW BROOKLYN HYMN.
PLYMOUTH LOGIC.

We are all horribly aweary.
Why in thunder amt you desdf"
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
THE O p | N 10 N
Published every Saturday,
nv lBENs r. ST a NTO n.
PUBLISHERS NOTICE.

ORblNlkY ADVERTISEMENTS tn ken ut the
rate of 81 90 per square one ihSrrtio ana 20
cents each subsequent insertion. One inch
3. space IL u sqaiirc. .
Z SPECIAL CoNrRACrs made with yearly AT
: yertiscrs on application,
DEATH ASp MARRIAGE y. licEs Inserted lr''
, OuruAnr NOTICES includii. poetry cents
per line. T.,
EpIrouI,L NurIcEs in reading columns 10
cents per line.
Advertisers who have contracted fora years
s,.nce must pay transient rates III or,trl To nave
their udyertiscnu uts discontinued before the
expiration of the time.
/ A II orders for advertising from strin % Al
svertising Firnis must hr accompanied with
the cu IA in urt,or 10 receive attention.
: Advertisements. or changes for adV"rtlSc-
ments, must be handed in as early rs Weu
.ncsday.
All arrearges must be paid by subscribers
desiring to discontinue this paper In ease
they are not paid tho dscontinuancc will D.
optional with til" publisher The iinan cia
n ..uonsibility of the party dnly considcred'
% Lr,..L NOTICES inserted at statute rates.
All hills due the OPINIoS Office for advertis-
ing must be paid quarterly. on the first days
of January, Ap.,il, July aud October.
Trancicnt advertising must hc inrdridbty
paid for in advance.
All job Work must be paid for On delivery.
Addres, a!l communications to
BEN +. STANTON,
Publisher Opinion, Bradford, Vermont.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
The Farmers Home.

The Hon. Dudley w. Adams,
master of the National Grange of
the Patrons of Husbandry, in clos
ing the Fourth of July Grafton at
Ottumwa, Iowa, gave the following
as his idea of what the farmers
home should be:
"Select the handsomcst spot Of all,
and erect a house of neat and taste
ful proportions and convenient, ar
rangements. ThesSiZe, finish, and
expense will be governed by the
means at command. Plant trees,
both forest and fruit, in such a way
as to break the sweep of the winter
winds. Donate a reasonable patch
of ground to small fruits and vege-
tables, sufficient to supply your
table with abundance of all desira-
ble kinds all tie year round. Make
an acre or more oflawn in front and
around the dwelling, interspresed
here and there with some ornamen-
tai shade trees. sand flow
eriny shrubs. Train an ivy over the
porch, a honeysuckle on the window
Hide the sheds and Outbuildings
with a clump cf trees or climbing
vine.
Your wife and daughters will have
some artistic flower beds cut in the
lawn, and rosebush by the door,
while singing birds will build nests
in the trees. Make the inside OF the
house attrac ive-a pleasant place
to sit. with inducements sufficient to
keep your sons from saloons. and
your daughters from the streets.
Among the absolute necceSsarles of
life, most decidedly and emphatic
ally place amusements, sports, fun.
A good ringing laugh is worth more
to stir the liver and promote digcs-
ton then IA dose of calOmel and a
deal pleaSanter to take. If you ever
come across a person, old or young,
who cannot, on proper provocation,
give out good ringing, hearty
laugh, watch him! He is either
after your pocket book or the under
taker. Joy, fun, laughter, sterling,
good, healthy, ,wideawake happiness,
are among the most noble and le'
Sira5le of human attributes. Moth.
ing but men can laugh. DO not
smother, but cultivate this distinc-
tive feature of humanity"
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

Doctor Middleton's office as q stu.
dent, they had only been acknowl.
edged lovers month. For Vivian
feared it would be years before he
could marry, and pride kept him ST.
lent. But love conquered his scru-
pies finally, and the words were
spoken that won from Olive such a
shy, sweet answer. H..s..
"What though you are poor" said
she. "It is the man l value, not
his externals. We are young and
can watt"
All! well, the tables are turned
now. 1t was Olive who asked sac
ifice, and he who denied it. The
very independence to which he owed
his success and education he con-
demned in her.
Olive met with other repulses, but
having once resolved, pursued her
course unfalteringly. Nor did she
lack encouragement. Many an old
friend of Mr.. Wayne, full of ad-
miration for the daughter who so
bravely took up her fathers work,
heartily bid her "God speedw Doc.
tor Middleton was one of these.
"She's a noble creature" he said
to her mother, soon after the enter
prise was started. Would there
were more like her. Society needs
just such healthful blood infused in
to its VEINS"
But her eyes frightened when
Clarice entered the room, and said,
eagerly: "Mamma, where's Olive 7
Isn't she home from the store yet ~
"No, dear; but come in and speak
to the DOCTOR" and Mrs. Waynes'
glance fingered on her face lovingly.
eyes, mamma; but Martha's
gone, bag and baggage, and what
are we to do for supper p
The doctor laughed, and Mrs.
Wayne sighed helplessly. But
brisk voice answered, "Why, get it
ourselves" and Olive suddenly made
her appearance in their midst. '.Pm
a splendid cook" she continued.
gravely. "And l invite you to stay
and see, Doctor Middleton"
~ accept the invitation" he an
swered, promptly, little to her dis
may.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
"LOst for liant Of u FORD.

"I.ost for want Of a word !"
Fallen among thieves and dying,
Priests and Leyltcs passing
The place where he is lying.
lie is too faint to call,
Too far of to be heard -
There are those beside lifc's highway
Lost for want of u word
"Lost for want of a word'
All in the black night straying
Among the mnzcs Of thought.
False lights ever betaying
Oh that human voice
The murky darkness had stirred
Lost and benighted for ever
Lost for want Of II word
"Lus: for want Of Il word "
Too high ii may be and noble,
To be ever checked in his sin.
Or led to Christ in his trouble.
No one boldly and truly
TO show him where he has erred
Poor handful of dust and ashes
'l.ost for want Of word "
A word that yOu might have spoken,-
Who knows what eyes may be dim,
Or what hearts may be aching AM
brokcni
Go, scatter beside all waters,
Nor sicken ut hope deferred
Let never II soul by thy dumbness
BE lost for want of word
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
Our New York Letter,
New YORK, SEPT. II, 1874.

NEW YORK, SEPT. II, 1914.
Editor Of Opinion:
1t has been popular this season
for the employees Of prominent
business houses, to challange each
other to friendly games of base ball,
and the papers have daily accounts
Of how the benedict book keepers of
Messrs A. & Co.,fplayed the bachel
or statesmen of Messrs. B. & Co., and
how, after much tribulation and
amid the greatest excitement, the
former won by score of 80 to 9S3
the half run having been granted
by the unprofessional umpire as a
compromise in q case Of uncertain
ty. Knowing that such occasions
must offer considerable material for
sport, 1 decided to attend in your
interest. I did attend.
The roll was called, and one man
found wanting. l was sitting under
the shade of a generous gingham, my
note book open with "The day was
everything to be desired" written as
a start-off to the proposed commu-
nication, when gentleman prOmi-
nent in this amateur movements.
stepped up and asked me to make
the other man. Now l give you my
solemn word as fellow Bohemian.
that barring a feverish, primary
school attack when small lad in
Jackets, I've never handled the frisky
ball, or welded the nimble bat in
game of the mildest form.
But l was fattcred. There must
be, ! thought, something attractive
in my physique--some distinguish.
ing features which marked me prom
inently in that crowd, and in weak
moment l gathered my embrionic
notes together, wiped and put up my
spectacles, and presented myself on
the field. Now whether it was a
courteous act merely, or because
they noticed the size of my hands
that they put me in as ''catch,"I l
never have discovered.
l did not ask at the time, and as
Pm not on speaking terms with any
of the party now, 1 claim the bene-
fit of the doubt. Some one asked
me for cent. 1t was thrown up
and a gentleman with his coat on
and a cane said "you take the field"
Somebody else took my cent. The
gentleman with his coat on said,
"How high will you have it !" and
before could answer some thing
struck me I'm the stomach anu the
man shouted zone strike" 1t seemed
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
MASONIC MEETINGS.

NHARITY LODGE, NO. 43. REGULAR
" Communications on Wednesday of the
week in which the moon fulls. Mr.. LEBANON
r. a. CHAPTER. Meetings on Wednesday
afternoon of the week in which the moon tulls.
BRADFoRD CoUNCIL. No. II. Meetings ut
Masonic Hall on Wednesday afternoon of the
week in which the moon fulls, in the months
of September. December. March and June.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
w. II. CARTER. N. d.

DHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. BRAD
ford. VI. Office at his residence. Vari-
ous Medicinal Compounds, of long tried expe
rienee, and of modern improvement; prepar-
I'd by himself, kept constantly on hand for
the benefit of the sick and lame.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

G. Ii. SIBLEY.
CARRIAGE TRIMMER, AND MANUFAC
~ turer of all kinds of Harnesses. Rel air
ing done in the best manner. Main ST., Op-
posite Hotel, West Foirlee.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
BUSINESS CA II ID s.
BRADFORD.

MISS CHARLOTTE NELSON.
OF PAINTING AND DRAW
i ing. Room in Academy Building.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
j. NJ. WARDEN.

I>iNE WATCHES, CLOCKS. JEWELRI,
Il Silyer Ware, Spectaclcs. Cutlery, Rcvo[
vers. Fancy Goods and Toys. Particular at
tention given to Repairing Fine Watches.
Office W U. Telegraph Co.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

T.. ii. ALLEN.
DIfOTOGRAPIIIC ARTIST, AND DEA-
L Ter in Stc,coscopes and Views, Albums.
and Picture Frames. Frame for Wrraths
of all kinds Fitted to Order. No. Is and 10
IIarly's Building.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

A. A. BOWEN.
v1LOUR, GRAIN, MEAL. PROVENDER-
il Shorts and Bags. sold at the Lowest Mar
ket vices. Mills at the South end of Brad,
ford Village.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

j. ii. GILMAN,
A UCTIONEER, WILL ATTEND TO ALL
N orders promptly. Win write auction bill
and get them printed if desired.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

BRADFORD BRASS BAND.
u +. WHITCOMB, LEADER; l.. X. Nc
IL. Dutfee, Clerk. Music furnished at
euSJilble rates.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

EDGAR w. SMITH.
A TTORNEY & COUNSELLOR AT LAW,
~ Wells River, Vt. Office with Judge Un'
terWOol
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

L. s. PEASLEE.
I VERY STABLE. GOOD TEAMS FUR
IL nished at ell times, and at reasonable pri-
ces. Stage TO and from Depot. Apply at Sta
BILE Office. rear of Trotter House. Also, Stable
at Newbury
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

G. l.. BUTLER.
nARLOR, CHAMBER AND KITCHEN
i Furniture. Cotfins. Caskets Robes, Caps,
Plates, Musical Htruments, &c. lst door
south of Trotter House. Main st.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

II. Il. HARRIS.
TNROTTER HOUSE, BRADFORD, VT.
L Coach to and from all passenger trains.
dpy and night
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

ii. STRICKLAND.
IRON FOUNDER & MACHINIST, AND
i Manufacturer of Agricultural implements.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

c. G. DOTY, ACT.
NJ MANUFACTURERS OF DR. DOTY'S
Vl Celebrated Mandrake Bitters, Flavoring
Extracts and Essences, &c, at Wholesale
and Retail.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

PRICHARD & Hay.
INOREIGN AND DOMESTIC DRY GOODS
Il Gents Furnishing Goods, Hats and Caps.
Groceries. Teas, Salt, Fish Pork, Lard and
Country Produce. Main Street
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

.. ROSWELL FARNIAM.
A TTORNEY g. COUNSELLOR AT LAW
II Master and Solicitor in Chancery and
Pension and Claim Agent.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

EATON & co.
II ARDWARE, IRON. STEEL, COAL.
II Nails, Cutlery. Seeds. Glass. Betting,
Cor,lagr &c Wholesale and Retail. Main ST.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26

S. THOMPSON.
rUNIN SHOP. SEOVES, TIN WARE. IRON
L Ware, Wooden Ware, &c. All kinds of
,Jub work neatly done.
Bradford opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1874-1881, 1874-09-26
EAST CORINTH.

l.. p. FOSTER.
"UTEL. FLOUR AND GRAIN MILL
II Best of Flour and Grain constantly OH
hand
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1874-01-16
Baltimore & Ohio Railroad.-Its APP
probation in the West.

The Chicago Tribune has the following
in regard to the Baltimore & Ohio Rail-
road, ELECTED by its contest with its great
rivals, especially the Pennsylvania road,
which indicates the interest taken in its
success and valuable service 10 the trade
of the West at this time:
The public have been interested speCts.
tors OF The fight between the Baltimore Il
Ohio and tho Pennsylvania Central Rail.
ways, which has resulted in an eXtraordi.
nary chespening Of freight and passenger
fare between Chicago, Cincinnati and ST.
Louis on the one hand, and Pittsburgh,
Philadelphia, Baltimore and Washington
on the other. The question is naturally
asked, Which can hold out longest? To
answer this question we must inquire
which of them hos the greater resources,
and which Is burdened with the smaller
amount Of liabilities, bearing in mind that
the same rules which apply 10 the case OF
the Pennsylvania apply also 10 the other
great trunk lines between the West and
the seaboaTd.
II is only necessary to group the pres
ent financial exhibits Of the corporations
which are mainly parallel and are com.
pe,ing Tor the same class OF business.
The table Is instructive:
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1874-01-16
The New Senator from Virginia.

The Richmond correspondent Of the
New York Herald says that Col. WITH
ERs is not an intellectual giant by any
means. In fact, his mental calibre Is little
above that Of the ordinary State politician
OR the average Southern newspaper ed.
itor. His craftsmanship has been mainly
exhibited In stump speeches, Masonic
lodges, political conventions and news
paper paragraphs. His devotion to that
venerable and irreconcilable old rebel,
JUBAL A. EARLY, is one OF the worst lea.
lures that characterize him. They are
one in feeling and sentiment, and are the
representatives Of Virginia chivalry, in
the sublimityef It's decsdence. BE was
formerly Wing, but has latterly been q
Conservative Democrat.