Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1874-02-20
Bumoroms Sketches.


20 Mr.. Sumr,ers, who was sitting op the
steps in 'front.'. He accosted Sup:uers as
the ',wner of the residence ap1 said
Il see you have no ligh.ning- rods on this
house.
No. said Supraers.'
Are you Coing to put any on p
We'll, hadn't thought Of it, replied
SINNERS.
You ought to. A tall building like this
is very much exposed. I'd like to run you
up one of my rods I; twisted steel, glass
tenders, ,nickel-plated tips-everything COM
plete. May put up one to show you ? III
do the job cheap
Certainly you may if you want to. L
haven't the slightest objection said sum-
ners.
During the next half hour the man had
his ladders up and his assistants at work,
and at the end of that time the job was
done. He called Summers out into the
yard to admire it. He said TO Summers
Now, that is all well enough, but if it
was my house I'd have another rod up on
the other side. There's nothing like being
projected thoroughly
That's true said Summers, it would be
better
I'll put up another, shall p asked the
man.
why, of course, if you think it's best,
said Summers.
Accordingly the man went to woIk again
and sooa had The rod in its place.
That's a first-rate job, he said to Sum-
ners, as they both stood cycling it. L like
such man ms you are. Big hearted libe-
raj, not afraid TO put a dollar down for
good thing. There's some pleasure in dea-
linz with you. L like you SO much thai I'd
put couple more rods on that house, out
on the north end, and one on the south for
almost nothin.'
1T would make things safer, suppose,
said Summers.
Certainly it would. I'd better do it,
hadn't I-hey p
Just as you think proper, said Summers.
So the man ran up two more rods, and
then he came down again and said to Sum-
ners:
There, that job is done. Now let's set
tie up
DO what p
why, that jobs finished, and I'll take
my money
You don't expect me to pay you, 1
hope?'
of course l do. Didn'. you tell me to
put those rods on your house p
My house = shouted Summers. 'Thun-
der and lightning i never ordered you to
put those rods up. 1t would have been ri
diculous: Why, man this is the court
house. and I'm here waiting for the court
to assemble. I'm on the jury. You SEEM
ed to be anxious to rush out your rods, and
as it was none Of my business, let you 60
on. Pay for It'll Come, now, that's pretty
good
The Blossburg people say that the man
ner in which that lightning-rod man tore
around town and swore was fearful. But
when he got his rods off the courthouse he
left permanently. He don't fancy the
place.
HEALTH INsURANCE.-At thin cadave-
rous looking German, about fifty years of
are, entered the Office Of health insurance
company and inquired: 'Ish ter man in
vat insures de boobies helts p The agent
answered, Il attend to that business We'll,
l wants mine helts insured. Vot YOU
shargeP' Different prices, answered the
agent, from three TO ten dollars a year,
and you get ten dollars a week in case of
sickness 'Vell,' said Mynheer, Il wants
ten dollars vert.' The agent inquired his
state of health. We'll, l ish sick all de
time. rs shust out of bet two or tree
hours day, and de doctor say he can't do
nosin more goot for me- If that's the
state Of your health returned the agent,
we can't insure it. We only insure per-
sons who are in good health At this
Mynheer bristled up in great anger You
must tink rs fool. Vot you tink 1 come
pay you ten dollars for inshure my helt ven
vas veil p
DOUBLE RELATIoNsHIP.-'Hu bub I
whose horse is that y
Dads, was the laconic reply.
Dad What dad p
Why, Uncle Geo. Hickman
Uncle l thought you said it was dads?
Is your dad your unclsy'
Wal, / don't know hotc it is, kersactly.
But he coas my dad and when be married
my Aunt Sally for bis second wife-wal, he
must be my uncle now, somehow, don It he p
WHEN the cock and The fox went on
board the ark they had no fear Of bagg age
smashers for one had a comb and the
other had brush, and that was all the lug
gage they had between them.
A LADY had her dress trimmed with bu-
giles before going TO a ball. Her little
daughter wanted 10 know if the bugIes
would blow when she danced. oh, no.
said the mother, papa will do that when
he sees the bill.'
A doctor called on a cholera patient, a
German. Prescribed. Next day he found
patient well. We'll, said doctor, the me.
dicine brought you out p No, sir;
didn't take it, What did you take p i
ate sour-kraut and turnip sauce So the
doctor wrote in his memorandum, 'Sauer-
kraus and turnip sauce good for cholera
Next week another call, Irishman this
time. Prescribed sauerkraut and turnips.
Next Gay called found the Irishman dead.
So he wrote opposite the old memorandum,
'Sauerkraut and turnip good for Dutch
man, but death to an Irishman.'
"A distinguished member of the Ken
tucky Legislature is reported in the Lou
isville Commercial as having candidly 'ac-
knowledged the corn.' Reappearing, after
an absence from his seat of three DAYS, he
had "been SICK What's been the matter
with you p he was asked. We'll, some
folks call it nervous chills; others pro-