Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1874-05-07
Miscellaneous.


Children are actually saw-makers--
they cut teeth.
When are eyes not eyes? When the
wind makes them water.
killing Judge by lawyer is called
unprofessional" in Arkansas.
How Patrick proposes to get over
his single blessedness-By proposing to
Bridget.
"A goodnatured spinster used to boast
that she always had two good beaux-they
were elbows,
Hopkins says that the only way his
wife makes herself useful is in making the
gold dust"
Leisure Is sweet to those who have
earned IL, but burdensome TO those who
get it for nothing.
Some one expresses that FLOWERS
are the sweetest things God ever made and
forgot to put soul within
"A Georgia paper promises to publish
thrilling cereal" Its readers will
probably make an oat of it.
When deaf and dumb lovers are mar
ried two members of the wedding party
are sure TO be unspeakably happy.
-SsS VIM thleHt you pDsSGSs. no
woods would be very silent if no birds
sang there but those who sang best
Gray steel silk suits trimmed with
darker shade Of gray embroidery and
steel beads are new and very stylish.
An old lady advises young girls who
want 10 remember thing TO write 1t
down and paste IL on the looking
glass.
Mrs Darlington is collecting auto
Gratis, and will be grateful for any speci-
mems Of the handwriting Of extiHftished
characters.
1T is estimated that IL takes domes-
ticated fly two-billionth part of a second
to wink, while an industrious mosquito
can do 1t in one.tenth of the time
1t Is said that a popular lecturer re-
| Gently kept an audience up until halfpast
ten 10 listen to his argument in favor of
going to bed promptly at nine.
The New York Herald thinks that If
the medical schools continue to graduate
female sawbones it will soon become 80
pleasant to be sick that no fellah will
want TO be we'll.
jet necklaces are quite fashionable
hanging In several rows on the front of
the dress. The real article Is expensive,
but as the fashion Is temporary great
many ladies think the imitation Is just az
well.
Physicians tell us that the habit of
running upstairs Is apt TO produce heart
disease. To avoid this, therefore, you
should never 60 up stairs IN the ordinary
way. Lie down on your stomach and
crawl up feet first.
ha - thn
General Conference OF the Methodist
Episcopal Church South the question Of
increasing the number of Bishops will
be considered. Since the death of Bishop
Early there remain eight Of those
officials.
Young April came with beaming eyes,
And face all smiles and smokers,
But now, alasi che sObs aud signs
And wildly blows and bickers;
Now hot, now cold, now rough, now mild,
She chops and changes quickly;
In fact, TO speak without reserve,
She makes az all feel sickly.
-BuTaLo Courier.
"A Baltimore daily announces that
Halstead, of the Cincinnati Commercial,
Is soon TO marry an heiress of Columbus,
Ohio" AS there has been for years o
Mrs. Murat Halstead, not TO speak Of
nearly bakers dozen Of Juvenile Hal
ing, TO her at least. A man who hath q
wife and children, as Lord Verulam puts
1t, may have given hostages to fortune,
but the fact Is no security against his con-
signment to photographic Mormonism any
day In the year.
-" Nothing, 1t seems TO u.s." exclaims
the Saturday Repiew, commenting upon
an article In CornhtU upon the wrongs Of
household servants, "can be more mis-
chievous and unwholesome than the sick
ly sentimentality which tries to squeeze a
tear over the fate Of stout, able-bodied
young woman who has four or perhaps
five hearty meals a day, comfortable
home TO live In, everything provided for
her, good wages, and no more work to do
than, ii taken continuously, could be got
through in three or four hours"
THERE was strange, pathetic scene at