Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1874-09-02
Miscellany.
House and Home.

A lady once went to an auction, and
bought a house in very favOrite and
fashionable locality. 1t was only lease
hold; but the price it was going for was
SO very low, she was tempted. E100,
think, was the sum it was knocked
down to her for. and she boas5ed of heI
bargain until she found she had to pay
$500 year ground rent, and that the
house would not let for more than f200.
| have been informed, but do not quite
believe ii, that her husband was yexed.
That was exceptionally a bad bargain;
but few people, who are not criminals
or paupers, are lodged for nothing.
Clergymen, secretaries, and farm babOr-
ers, indeed, are sometimes housed; but
then the fact is taken into considera-
ton, and they pay indirectly. If you
buy house and live in ii, You lose the
interest of the money invested; SO, as
far as mere pecunlary considerations
gO,lt comes pretty near the same thing.
DO not accuse me, y impatient reader,
of boring you with trite truisms. These
are merely the preface to grand tip.
| am about to inform you how You may
live rent free. L was travelling last
year on the same steamboat with an
American, who amused me very much
with a variety of anecdotes, most of
which We're made tricks. Indeed, they
might have been collected and pub
lished under the title of "Caveat
EmptOrn How much there is in tell
ing a story. As general rule, sadly
miss the point of a humorous frauu, for
my sympathies are apt to lie with the
cheatee rather than with the clever
fellow who has outwitted him. But my
present companion possessed the power
of perverting my moral instincts for
the time being; and | chuckled over
deeds which, if committed against my
self, should consider the very reverse
of funny. | dare say you have OBJ
served, when reading the Great BiOg-
raphy, that however fluent DIR. john
son might be, it was necessary for BOs-
well TO make an occasional remark. A
similar obligation falling upon me, L
observed that an American coming
over to England would hardly care TO
exercise his talent for tinesse; there
would be no sport in it, the poor ma
tives lying so completely at his mercy.
Don't you believe me-" said my COM
panion, closing an eye | reckon you
can take remarkably good care OF your-
selves over here. WHY, one of the
smartest tricks / ever knew was taught
me the other day 10y a LOndOner." Is
it a secret r. inquired. at is" he re-
piled; but don't mind telling you:
Four years ago | came over from New
York to superintend the English busi-
ness of the firm | belong to. As my
residence was likely to be long one, l
looked ont for house within conye-
nient distance of London; for l am
family man, and like my children TO
have the run of the fields when L can
manage it. | hate to see them dressed
up fine;and what's one of those squares
to play in? Well, got just the thing
to suit me - nice garden, farms all
round, half an hours railway ride from
INV office. The rent was stiff Tor the
accommodation, which was sO-so-twO
hundred for yearly tenancy. one hun
dred and fifty if | took a seyen-year
lease. | reckoned that | should want
il a good ten years. so L decided Tor
the lease. especially as the agent told
me | should be sure to underlet 1t IT L
wanted 10. When | got to know my
neighbors. and compared notes. found
that | was paying at much higher
rate than any of them were. However.
that did not vex me, so long as could
live there. But after two years certain
changes took place which made 1t ne
cessarv that [ should go and live at
LIVERPOOL. So | had to move again,
and tried to underlet my house.
could not do il for some time, because
| stood out for the rent paid myself;
but at last | grew tired of the dead
loss, and told the agent to make the
best terms he could. SO he let TIE
place for ninety, and that has been
going on for four years, so that the
lease is nearly up. But L never knew
till last week who my tenant was:
"Who do you think 2" 81 cannot guess"
why, my landlord. hav ebeen pay
ing the cnss sixty pounds a year for
living in his own house all this time.
It's fact"