The St. Cloud journal. [volume] (St. Cloud, Minn.) 1866-1876, 1874-08-27

|
come to tea and calm yourself lit
tle," she said. You are unwise to
give way to such excitable moods
Lord Rutherford is not the nature to
stand it,
81 know that, and do not indulge
in them before him." I replied.
"But if you allow this habit to
grow, when you are married you will
not find the restraint easy" she ex-
| claimed.
II shall not trouble myself then
my husband must take me for what
am,' was my reply.
NEEDED not Alice's firm "You are
very wrong, Magdalen," to make me
aware of the fact: hnt somnhnw +Aa+
evening felt as if some great pres
sure had been taken off me, and my
own true nature, evil though it might
be, would out.
went out again into the garden, to
avoid continuing the conversation,
and to calm myself:
The next day I watched anxiously
for a letter,-for, truth to tell, I was
particularly anxious that my wedding
should take place at the time named,
and if Lady Rutherford died I knew
this could not be. But to my sur
prise Eustace did not write for a
couple of days, and then only hur-
ried note to say his mother continued
i'll, but that he thought there were
still faint hopes of her ultimate re-
covery; he did not ever mention his
return.
I was disappointed; but at the
same time I knew Lord Rutherford's
cold nature, and Therefore comfort
ed myself with the thought that he
probably had not the gift of warm
love-letter writing. I was naturally
Of a lively disposition, and putting
the epistle in my desk, I certainly
troubled myself but little about it,
turning my attention to such amuse-
ment as Eustace's absence now gave
me leisure to join in.
Instead Of confning myself to the
rectory garden, I went visiting
amongst the neighboring families,
and, alas for my weakness and idle
ness!-again fell into the company OF
Guy Deveril. Since my engagement
to Lord Rutherford had done my
best to avoid Captain Deveril, feeling
that it was better for my own happi-
ness and also more pleasant to Eus-
tace, who though he would not stoop
to outward demons tration of jealousy,
was one who I knew would brook no
rival. Now that I had nothing to
do, however, no one to be with me
constantly, the temptation was too
great for me to resist, and, insensibly,
from meeting Guy in company, and
talking generally with him, I passed
on to strolling with him apart from
others, and finally to tete-o-tete RAM
bles and moonlight saunterings, much
in the same free way which I had
been wont to indulge in before my be-
trothal.
Guy was more on a level with N.Y.
self than the stern intellectual Lord
Rutherford, and the effort I made to
comprehend and appreciate Eustace
was not necessary when I was with
the gay captain.
He loved pleasure, romance, poetry,
music,-all that could give sunshine
to life, but which gives no help to
weather its storms,--and I was of the
same light nature. His company
charmed me, his fattery charmed me,
and that gallant attention in little
matters, which Lord Rutherford
would never have thought of paying,
charmed me. But though I INDUCED
my vanity and love of gayety, my
conscience was still on the alert, and
as yet was faithful in my thoughts
to Eustace, and if he had but return
ed then, as I hoped and expected all
might yet have been well. All, how
different indeed might my fate have
been!
Days, weeks passed,-a couple of
months went by, and Lord Ruther-
ford only wrote that his mother lin
gered still, but in such q state that
from day to day they expected her to
breathe her last. Our union he nev-
er mentioned; only once or twice did
he speak of his return; and though
his letters came regularly enough,
and always breathed affection,
I began to receive them as a
matter Of course, and to grow slowly
less interested in their contents.
I was little displeased with Eus-
tace at thus deserting me for his dy-
ing mother, and the attentions Of Guy
Deveril were therefore all the more
welcome and I know not whether by
design or not, just at that time Guy
pressed them more assiduously than
ever, and whenever he could be he
was beside me.
Alice shook her head, and my faith
er looked grave; but T used to laugh
and say was dull without Eustaee,
and should die if I had no one to help
me while away the time, or else I put
on an offended air, and with flashing
eyes asked them if they distrusted me.
My foolish pride made me obstinate,
II would not be reprimanded and
ruled by simple, Alice who spent her