Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1874-03-19

after long nights dispute In the Course
of which nv learned friend had weil-nigh
come to blows with the universiiy's most
celebrated professor.
AT last heard that they were again In
London, and, full Of enthusiasm, darted
round the corner 10 welcome them home.
Nobody was with them but Mrs. Hanway,
Winiffcd's mother wouid enter unAn.
nounced. and surprise the philosopher. !
entered unannounced, and was surprised
myself. Wa this the effect of matrimony,
or of foreign trxvels Each occupant oil
the room WAS engaged in an exercise
wholly unconnecied, az IL seemed, with
those of the rest MY friends wife. the
lady whom had almost loved, queen OF
all grace and comeliness, was appearing
and disappearing like flash behind the
DAYS Tipsss, showing at the moments oil
disclosure face flushed with excitement,
and lustrous coils Of hair tumbled into
the widest disorder, while she accompa-
MED the whole performance with strange
and inarticuls,e sounds. Her mother. the
same Mrs. HAnway who was so perfect a
model of dress and carriage that many OF
her lady friends were wont 70 lament
among themselves that she gave herself
such airs. was seated on the floor, dressed
for walking, but without her bonnet. Yes,
she was certainly drumming on an in
verted tea tray with the wrong end OF the
poker. And the philosophers 1t was per-
picking, after three years separation, TO
meet him thus. The philosopher was
cantering round the room on allfours,
wearing on his head his own waste-paper
basket Briskly he cantered round, ever
I'll so ko lam - m anYinU
time, until he reached my feet, which
were rooted TO the spot with astonish-
ment He glanced up sideways. rose
with cry TO the normal attitude OF man,
and grssped me by the hand. At the
sound of his voice his wife, dropping the
paper from her hands, raised them quick
iy TO her hair; and his mother-in-law,
with as much dignity as the effort would
allow, scrambled TO her feet. Then
In an instant the cause Of their eccentric
conduct was made clear. Throned on the
hearthrug, and showing by gracious
smile few of the newest teeth, sat fine
baby OF some fifteen months. In one
dimpled fist was tightly clenched the
brush which had so neatly arranged the
mothers braids; while the other was en-
gagged In pounding the grandmother's
best bonnet into shapeless mass.
We werc all somewhat embarrassed ex-
cept the BABY. The ladies knew that they
were untidy, and that / was an intruder.
As for the learned father, he stood now
on one leg and now on the other, while he
shifted the waste. paper basket from hand
10 hand, and continued to smile almost as
perseveringly as his amiable offspring.
Yet II was he who ut last put an end TO
our awkward position by expressing q
wild desire 10 have my opinion OF the
new curtains In his study. Rather sheep
ishly I said good.by TO the lady Of the
house, trying TO express by my eyes that ]
would never call again unann0unced. 1
knew that Mrs. HRnway had not forgiven
me as / humbly took the two fiugers
which she offered; and felt like brute
as the most important member of tho fam
ily condescended to leave damp spot by
the edge Of my left whisker.
When, however, had been swept
down. stairs by my impulsive friend, and
was alone with him In his den, my
courage returned, and with 1t some In
dignation. ] confronted him, and sternly
asked why | had not been told that he
was father. "Not been toldf" echoed
he; "do you mean To say that you did
not know about the babyY" q Not so
much MS that 1t was" | replied, gloomily.
lie was overwhelmed; of course he had
supposed that every one knew II from the
Queen downward. OF course fifty people
ought to have told me, who OF course had
told me everything else. At last my
curiosity got the better of my indigna
ton, and cut short his apologies by be-
my questions" Does the shape
Of Its head content your" l asked.
. The shape of whose WHAT" cried the
apparently too surprised for
"Of the baby's head, Of
I replied, tartly; 81 merely
wish to know If the child IL
likely To be rs intellectual as you
hoped.n Isn't the hair lovelyW he
asked, inconsequently. This was too
much, and, assuming my severest man
ner, / delivered myself In this wise: 81
though no doubt was wrong,
that the use OF baby to you would be
partly TO furnish you with raw material
for philosopher, partly to enable you,
by constant observation, to gain further
evidence bearing on such vexed questions
as, whether the infant gathers It's ideas OF
space by feeling about, whether II Is con-
scious Of itself, ETC." "Well," he said,
AZ don't expect much help
from my infant In those matters unless l
can get inside her and think her
Her thoughts!" cried l, In
"you don't mean TO say It's
a girlf Good graciousl you are not going
TO educate female philosophers" He
looked rather vcxed. "Of course It's a
girl" he said. 1.-THE father of female
/ gasped. Dear mel"
said he, somewhat testify, isn't itenough
TO be father Of noble womanY"
Now, have often put up with great
deal from my learned friend, and am quite
aware that / have been spoken OF ~
" Bozzy" behind my back. But there Is a
point even for the worm, and no.
body will sit forever at the feet which are
kicking him. / had been
snubbed more than once by this Illogical
parent, and, assuming my most sarcastic
inquired, with an appearance
of Difference: us 1t not rather early to
speak of your daughter as . noble
"Not at ALL" said the philosopher.
had kept aloof from the philosopher
for some weeks, nursing my wrath, like
Achilles said to myself-cross as bear
overheard my landlady say In the pas
sage--when received = hasty note beg.
cling me TO come to him atonce. fancied
,nvself aum oned to n council of chiefs