The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1874-07-30
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

JOSEPH ARCH proposes to bring over
| Il 900 English labOrers and let them Know
what liberty is, but Joseph had better
make arrangements for their bread ana
butter before they land. Three square
miles of freedom won't go rs far aS
sandwich 10 a hungry man.-Detr0it Free
Press.
NEARLY all newspapers outside OF the
State of Virginia spell Culpeper with three
MS There are but two in il, and that
newspaper men don't know il shows That
they were shooting paper wads at the
schoolgirls when they should have Deen
studying their histories and geograpmes.-
C5s1ie7-Jotg7lGL.
IAN. see how the sun is gliding yOn
distant sails" remarked Matilda Jane 10
John Alfred, rs the steamer ON whlch lhey
were passengers was nearing the port 0I
Milwaukee. "Alas - quoth John AlirtI'
gazing in the direction Indicated Dy MS
sweet companion, "that's only MllWa9-
kee street, and them things you see i
ears."-CoUrie7-Jot171dt.
''Wen, Missus, Is goin' to leave YOU,
said Molly to her mistress, whom she hal
loved and grown fat with for good
many years. 'Going TO leave me, Molly!
Why, where are you going" ION, Is
going to get married; I've worked long
enough, and Is going to rest my bones:
OF course Mrs. Jones could make no OBJ
lection TO this common and natural te-
male frailty. So Molly went and nothing
was heard of her for year or two, when
she came back, poor and emaciated, hay
inc lost her husband, and all the rest OF
ills human nature is heir to having fallen
upon her. Mrs. Jones was much sur
prised to see her coming, and said to her:
swell, Molly. have you rested your
bones?" "GOlly. MissuS-IS rested my
iaw-bOnes, and denis all the bones I've
rested"
In the parish church of Eettercaina,
Scotland. custom existed, and, indeed,
still fingers in some parts of the country,
of the precentOr, on communion Sab
baths. reading out each single line of the
psalm, or paraphrase, before it was sung
by the congregation. On one communion
Sunday the preacher observed the noble
family of Byzantine approaching the Ia
bles. and likely to be kept out by those
who pressed in before them. Bel e very
Jealous for their accommodation, he called
out to an individual whom he considered
TO be the principal obstacle in clearing the
passage, "COme back Jock, and let in the
noble family of Byzantine - and then turn
inc to his psalm-bOOk, he took up his duty,
and went on to read the line, Nor stand
in sinners way"
How THEY GET HORSE UP.-When
horse falls down. fourteen men put their
hands in their pockets and ask each other
why they don't do something. Fifteen
other men advise the driver until he Is half
mad, and two small boys stand by, with
their hands clasped and an expression OF
determination written on every lineament.
Then several men ask why somebody don't
hold his head, until one old gentlemen vol
unteers to hOldit. He steps forward calm
", bends over the PROSTATE animal and
puts one hand gently on his ear. The
horse. getting tired, raises his head sud-
denly, the crowd laugh, and the old gen
tIeman seems to take no more interest in
the proceedings. Then the horse, having
had all the fun he can have, rises like
tidal wave, and the crowd disperseS.-FOT-
and