Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1874-10-23
II UMO r
We thought that everything that it W:

Said bs xe1S ~ contribution: A
800 hasaes s5hose liable is noted fol
bias a brisk daugh-
lss 4 I sSs u N Il II hssrders with
the f0Il0Wng par0uy sung to an accompa-
niment on new fifty-dollag piano: "Whi!e
beefsteak and venison costs lots of cash,
be it ever so grisly, there's nothing like
hash; the scrapings and leavngs of no use
elsewhere, when mixed altogether make
excellent fare. Hash, hash, good meat
hash! Be it ever so grisly, there's nothing
like hash! A stranger from home, hotels
dazzle in vain: o, give me cheap eating
house food that more's plain; the waiter
who gaily re-echoes my call for nice plate
of hasS or single fshball. Hash,
hash," etc.
It is related Of George Clark, the cele.
brased minstrel that, being exam
indd VS. 4 stIslEsSs, he was severely interro
gatefE by TIC atta5ney, who wished to
I,reaks aoQ sliia evidence. You are iii tht
nsgfsNls ilasf business, I believer in
CURED the lawyer eyes, sir,'' was the
prompt reply. "Isn't that rather a low
calling2" demanded the lawyer. II don't
know but what it is, SIR replied the min
strel, "but it is so much better than my
fathers that [ am rather proud of it.. ,
''What was your fathers calling?" "He
was a lawyer" replied Clark, in a tone OF
regret that put the audience in a roar,
The lawyer let him alone
A young lawyer in a country town asked
some of his friends to game of cards in
his room, to be followed by little supper.
latitude, and dish of them cooked in the
choicest way was the feature of the occa-
sion. Supper time approached, and dul-
ing a temporary lull in the conversation,
the door suddenly opened, and Milesian
waiter, in a loud voice, announced supper
thus: ''Mr E., them tuds is done, and SUI
per is ready"
In view Of the fact that Watts hymns
> have been translated into the Choctam
language, and have become favorites OF
the braves, an admirer of the noble red
men says it is very affecting to think of a
noble red man sitting upon a fence and
singing, How doth the little busy bee,"
while he watches his wife carrying home
couple OF bushels of potatoes upon each
shoulder, and wondering if he couldn't
swap that squaW for a jug of robust rum.
An lrlshman recently stopped at a hotel
IN Des Moines, Iowa, where pretty high
bills we've charged. In the morning the
landlord made out the amount Of damages
and presented it to Pat. After he had
glanced over it the latter looked the laid
lord in the face and exclaimed: s'Ye put
me in mind of a snipe.n ''Why?'' asked
the landlord. Because ye're very nigh
all bill.''
'Got anything for sick man to read?n
inquired pug-nosed boy at newsstand
the other day, Eyes, anything you want,
Bibles, poems, religious books, and so
forth, replied the clerk. s'Biblesr' echoed
the boy, ''do you think dads hangel?
Gimme a lively dime novel-one with an
injun sculping soger.n
A colored preacher down South took for
his text the words, Though after nv
skin worms destroy this body, yet in my
flesh | shall see God,'' which he divided
into three parti, as follows: 'sFirst, skin
worms; second, what they done; third,
what the man seen after he was eat up.,,
AT dinner party recently, Senator Nye
put his new silk tile carelessly upon the
sofa. A few minutes after. Gen. Butler
sat down upon and crushed the hat fear
fully. Oh it, roared Nye, II could
have told you it wouldn't fit before You
tried it on"
Susan Jane must have been scantily
dressed when she was looking out for her
lover and sang:
Hell come tonight the winds at rest
~, The moon is full and fair;
III wear the dress that pleased him best
A RIBBON IN my hair.'
lie Went out between the acts, and re-
turned vigorously chewing Glove. His
wife asked him where he had been. and he
said, sTo see a friend.n She calmly re-
piled that she thought his friend must be
dead, as she could smell his bier.
One of the old settlers of the Isles of
Shoals seeing the name of Psyche on the
hull Of yacht, the other day, spelled it
out slowly, and then exclaimed: .sWell.
if that amt the durndest way to spell
fish,