The herald and mail. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1873-188?, 1874-07-24
FAoTs AND PAEc1Es.

of them, are subscribing handsomel
from their little savings-bRnks for hi
= relief in his old age.
"A little boy OF our acquaintance
few days ago, after attentively watch
ing couple OF industriously incline
bugs, remarked that even the bugs ha'
got to playing marbles.
! -"Sad thing 20 lose your wife, " sale
friend TO Vermonter who Ltood n
! the grave Of his wife. We'll, tolera
bly, sad, replied the mourner, "bui
! then, her clothes just fit my oldest girl.
A peddler calling on an old lady X
{ dispose of some goods inquired Of hel
/ if she could tell him of any road on
which no peddler had travelled. "Yos,
! replied she, "I know Of one, and that's
, he road TO heaven"
, Out of one hundred and eighty.tvo
boys in the Connecticut reform school
} the superintendent reports that one hun
J dred and eighty are liars. The proposal
now is to educate. the entire lot Of 'en
for the profession of the law.
1t will render your daily routine of
ifc more balmy TO be made aware of
the fact that hydrophobia can be CON-
municated bv dog that is not mad.
and hat the disease may suddenly start
from bite twenty years old.
An elderly clergyman OF Chicago,
when asked the other day why no hal
never married, replied that he had spent
his lifetime in looking for n woman who
would refrain from working him pair
of slippers, and he had never found her.
A Brooklyn young womon, who
abandoned her old husband, says " Ho
was too soft. / couldn't be hugging
and kissing him all the while-it isn's
my disposition. couldn't bear 10 bo
obliged TO sit on his lap and cuddle him
every time / wanted a cent.
A Shreveport editor, being asked
wether Byron wrote n certain line, re-
piled that he could not say that Byron
wrote it, as he did not see him write il,
but the line was 10 be found in one Of
Byron's poems. Evidently something
had happened to teach that editor eau.
tion.
Walt Whitman's ode 10 the st.
Louis bridge:
Lo bridge at 81. Louis
Stretched from the bungH OF multiplicAtod
beer kegs,
Already overpassed by feet that could not bo
excolled in Chicago (Which he was an
star-Joyed with tho multitudinous oxpocta-
tions OF the whereas aud wherefore.
For it string serpent huod myriads
And lightning girdod moustrosities Of all
kinds
Down through the snti-spasmodic whirs OF
catelepaies,
Dumfounding, bamboozling all, even tho Hero
After
In an unmitigated extension Of tho culmina-
tion Of Cundurango.
Joseph Arch proposes TO bring over
II 900 English laborers and let them
know what liberty is, but Joseph had
better make arrangements for their
bread and butter before they land.
Three square miles Of freedom won't go
as far as a sandwich 10 a hungry man.
Detroit Free Press.
A person wants 60 be careful, Of
course, but where in the crown OF ones
hat can one find room for a slip contain
ing directions for the treatment Of
drowning man, a compendium OF rules
for avoiding hydrophobia, a'string OF re-.
medies for sunstr, ke, aud ones fire.
alarm card Nobody but n paper hanger
could do the job we'll.
"A Chicago clergyman relates the
following anecdote, Z" / once married
handsome young couple, aud as / took
the bride by the hand, nc the close OF
tBsFaaKsRffRpq88hJ Gna SrlgS says aSS5ssBS6 RSFBF9fg
face, and pointing 10 the bridegroom,
replied, Il think he is the ono 10 be
congratulated
"A bone cavern has lately been dis
covered in Poland, near Wieruskow, and
named the Mammoth Cave, in alln-
sion 10 the number of bones OF the
European mammoth which Il has
yield ID. 1t has also furnished a large
number OF stone Implements, the mate
rials for their construction having been
from siliceous nodules in the
oolitic rocks.
An Illinois paper says "Mr. A.
w. Sheltan came into this Office the
other day with one side Of his face bad
ly swollen and one eye greatly inhamed,
caused, as he says, by the poison OF
potato bug. He struck a bug with n
piece of lath, and some of the "juice"
struck his face near his eyelid. Two
physicians attending him consider the
bug much more powerful as a blistering
agent than Spanish flies.
On a cruise the sailors saw n comet
and were somewhat surprised and
alarmed at its appearance. The hands
net and appointed a committee 10 wait
ln the commander and ask his opinion
IF IL. They approached him and said
. We want 10 ask your opinion, your
honor" "Weli, my boys, what is IL
about ?" eve want 10 inquire about
hat thing up there" "Now, before
answer you, first let me know what You
5hink it is T. "Well, your honor, we
nave talked IL all over. and we think IL
Is a star sprung a-leak."
-"It is an exploded theory" says
1ne who speaks with knowledge, "that
women dress 10 please the men. They
lress to please or spite each other. Any
yirl of sense and experience knows that
{ is as easy TO break n mans heart in
p muslin, neatly made mp, as IL is in
800 silk costume made by a mAn-dress-
maker" IL is, in fact. n great deal
,asier. The natural charm OF a young
yirl is often destroyed by excessive
iressing. Men like tasteful and not
,xtravagant toilets; and the rivalry in
iress among women is not TO catch n
Deau, but 10 mortify an enemy.
-"I have been," says Judge Mott,
Il at the bar and in the military service,
md nv experience leads me 10 the con-
,lusion that women are az well fitted for
he one as the other. The light breech-
oading carbine demands activity rather
han strength. Woman, as a soldier,
would have little TO do besides march
ng, and shooting, and being shot. IL
8 said that a well.bred, intelligent,
ionest woman will make n better attor-
iey than an ignorant, vicious, unscrupu-
GUS man. This is true but il is equal
v true that a healthy, active woman
will make better soldier than q de-
,repit mar"
London's Poverty.
A London correspondent Of the Gin