Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1874-03-29
TYPOGRAPHICAL


A subscriber to the Cincinnati Times,
writing to that paper from Tranquility,
Ohio, closes his letter with, ave like the
Times very much, and don't think we could
do without it here. The Handbook was
really a nice present. 1 would not take the
price of the paper for my book" One
would naturally expect peaceful and tenn
perate sentiments, like the foregoing, from
a man who dates his letters '~Tranquillity.'
81 wish Ihada dollar, remarked a young
lady on Church street yesterday, just after
passing a party of ladies whose complexion
~rivalled the lilly in purity. "yYhat would
You do with it?' inquired gentleman
friend. "rd go to the drug store and buy
me some satin powder" was the reply.
What did she mean?
The local of the P1iaski Citizen. who
never could afford TO smoke a cigar costing
over five cents, gowls thus: "On yester-
day might have been seen cracking rock
upon u public square, at fifty cents a day
TO work out a fine, a ragged niger with a
twenty cent cigar in his valve.'
1t becomes our melancholy duty 10 an
uounce that Fayetteville has a Base Ball
Club. The play ground is near the depot;
lint and bandages may be procured at any
OF u drug stores, and the Tennessee Lun-
attic Asylum is only eight miles from Nash
vile, on an excellent macadamized road
Fayetteville Express.
The editor Of the Ldlcreaceburq Journal
thus details his experience in running
" bachelors hall :" We got out of " grub
and having neither money nor credit, con-
cluded to live or fried exchanges, of which
we had a full supply. We first tried to fry
the Franklin Reriew and Journal and the
Lebanon Herald, but found il a waste OF
lard-they were so cry, You know. Then
we tried the Netc York Herald and several
other leading dailies, and after 4 good deal
OF trouble, and time lost in cooking them,
we found them to contain 95 per cent. Of
lie and not at all p~alatable."
Muggins, of Phenix, celebrated his "iron
wedding" M day last week, and he invited
about d hundred and twenty guests 10
the wedding. Of course each person felt
compelled to bring a GIFT of some kind, and
each one did. When Mr.. and Mrs. Smith
came, they handed Muggins a pair of fiat
irons. When Mr.. and Mrs. Jones arrived.
they also had a pair of flatirons. All
hands laughed at the coincidence. And
there was even greater merriment when
III INV - AAAhC0 VIII wv HdlAS VI udt-
irons. But when Mr.. and Mrs. Robinson
came in with another pair Of latirons,
the laughter became perfectly cOnvul-
sive. There was, however, something
less amusing about it when the Thomp-
SONS arrived with four flatironS wrap
ped in a brown paper, And Muggins' face
actually looked grave when the three john
son girls were ushered into the room car
Tying 4 flatiron apiece. Each one of the
succeeding sixty guests brought flatirons,
and there was no break in the continuity
until old Mr.. Curry arrived from Port By
ron with 4 caStiron cow bell. MUggins
has NJ earthly use for q COW bell, and, any
other time, he would have treated such a
present with scorn. But now he was actu-
ally grateful TO Mr.. Curry, and he was
abOuttO embrace him when the Walsing-
hams anne in with the new kind Of double
pointed f~latirOns with wooden handles.
And all the rest of the guests brought the
same articles, excepting Mr.. Rugby, andhe
had with him a patent stand for hold
ing fiatirons. MuCginS got madden and
madder every minute, and, by the time the
company had all arrived, he was nearly in
sane with rage; and lie went mp to bed,
leaving his wife to entertain the guests.
In the morning they counted mp the spoils,
and found that they had two hundred and
thirteen fatirons, n stand and a cow bell.
The fact, is the hardware store in the
place had an overstock Of fiatirons, and sold
them at an absurdly low figure, and Mug
gins guests unanimously went for the
cheapest thing they could find, as people
always do on such ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Nel-S.