davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
my Dead Brother on Ice.'
INew York Herald. June ss.l

New York Herald, June g.
A well-dressed young man, aged about
twenty-eight years, ford complexion, mid
die height, brown side-whiskers, and pre-
senting generally quite respectable ap-
pearance, has been going the rounds for
some time past imposing upon the ereduli-
ty of numbers of merchants in the follow
ing manner: He manages, in most sys-
tematic way, to obtain an introduction by
some means to his intended victim. Hav-
ing thus broken the ice, he engages in con-
yersation with his new acquaintance, and,
by his conversational abilities, manages to
impress them with the idea that he is on
intimate terms with their friends. lie then
disappears from their presence for about
three DAYS but returns on tie afternoon of
the fourth day, between the hours OF four
and five in the afternoon. On entering he
Immediately rushes uD to the owner OF the
establishment and requests few minutes
private conversation, which being granted,
he unfolds the following duieful tale MIR.
Smith, oh. pardon me. sir; but just re-
ceivcd the following telegram from Phila-
delphia (producing a forged dispatcl) in
forming me that my brothers body has
lust arrived from Charleston, and that his
| body il on ice at the Pennsylvania depot,
owing to the fact that the freight charges
were not prepaid. You see his death is so
unexpected that Treally don't like to go
over 10 Brooklyn TO obtain the necessary
! funds to defIay the expenses from mother
| for fear of shocking her nervous system.
i Moreover, it is after bank hours. May
| request that you viii fell pleased to advance
i me a sufficient sum to pay my expenses to
Philadelphia and return. L is only mat
ter Of about $1n, and | will hasten on my
return TO refund tie amount"
On several occasions he has been success
ful in obtaining the money. OF course the
gentleman, whore charitable instincts and
desire I'd help a fellow-being in such appar-
rent distress prompts him 70 advance tne
amount, hears the last Of bis charitable
i loan when the coaf-tails Of the borrower DIS
appear through tho front door. This young
gentleman tried this game on again yester-
day at the Isovejoy, in Park Row. but mex
nv he retired discomiited, ard viii be com
nelled X, seek elsewhere for sufficient money
to bring on his brothers dead body-''iow
on ice.'
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
Brewing in the United States.
San Francisco Commercial Herald, July .

San francisco Commercial Herald, July O.
At a late session of the Brewers Con-
gress, held at Boston, some remarkable
facts were elected, and are well worthy OF
comment. 1t appears that the amount of
capital invested Ill breweries, malt houses,
barley lands and hops, is $152, 776, 696; the
total number of persons employed in brew
cries, malt houses, barley culture, and hop
culture, is SO, AT. and the number of acres
under cultivation in barley and hops is t.
1913, 952 The quantity of beer actually sold
IN the United States and Territories during
he fiscal year ended June 80, 1S73 was g.
tl0,823 barrels, and the amount of revenue
,Iaid to the Government for fermented liq-
lors for the past ten years was $6l, ,279, 737.
These figures exhibit the immense proper
ions to which the brewing or malt liquors
aas attained in this country. In view of the
sva.sa4 f.sA&nasa1>se a..aafanrnd ilI10n the
trming interest by the brewers, it would
tem strange that Grangers should be ac-
vely hostile to the brewers interests, were
not that 30 many of their acts were open
the sane suspicion of suicidal tendency.
n like manner the Grangers are interposing
lious obstacles against the interests OF
,neyard proprietors, and virtually intimate
lat persons engaged in raising the grape
re no better than ''publicans and sinners, "
Willie IiOSc VINO cultivate tI6 SOL OLlici
products are worthy of all praise. 1t is
only reasonable to conclude that the large
amount of beer absorbed every twelve
months by the people Of this country has
raken the place of proportionally large
quantity of spiritous liquor, and has, to that
extent subserved the cause of Temperance.
The impossibility of enforcing abstinence
from liquor by legal enactments has been
so freullpntlv and noSitively demonstrated
that it requires no present discussion. The
best way to make people desire q thing is
to prohibit them from having it. Restraint
upon personal freedom and responsibility is
uncomfortable to most men, and they will in
variably discover some metlad Of evasion,
in which case excess is more than likely to
result. In SO far as ''local option" is con-
celned, sufficient number of elections have
been held to incite testing of its constitu-
tionaly in our highest legal tribunal, and it
would be wise to let the question come to
final decision before mourning further ex-
pense, and deranging business for what
may prove to be an untenable enactment.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
How 7 was Sold.
b. MIX I,wain.


You NAV remember that iectured lately
for the young men of the Clayonian Soeie-
ty? During the afternoon of that day
was talking with one of the young gentle
men referred to, and he said he had an
uncle who, from some cause or other, SEEM
ed to have grown permanently bercft OF all
emotion, and with tears i'll his eye, this
Young man said: s.Oh, if could onl, see
him laugh once more? Oh, if 1 could only
see him weep?'' | was touched. Inever
could withstand distress. | said: :. Bring
him to my lecture: I'll start him for you."
s'Oh. if You could but do it, Ii you could
but do it, all our family would bless you
forever more; for he isvefy dear TO us. oh.
my benefactor, can you make him laugh !?
Can you bring soothing tears to those
parched orbs ?'
| was profoundly moved. | said: My
son, bring the old party around. have
got some good jokes in my lecture that will
make him laugh if there is any laugh in
him: and if they miss fire, | have got some
others that will make him cry or XIII hlin,
one or the other
Then the young man wept On my neck,
and presently spread both hands on my head
and looked up toward heaven, mnmbling
something reverently; and then he went
after his uncle. He placed him III full
view, in the second row of benches. that
night, and beganon him. tried him on
mild iokes--then with severe ones: dosed
him with bad jokes, and riddled him with
good ones; fired old, stale jokes into him,
and peppered him fore and aft with Teti-hot
new ones. Twanned up tony work, and
assaulted him on the right and left, in
front and behind; fumed, and charged,
and ranted, till was hoarse and sick, and
frantic and furious; but never moved him
once--I never started q smile nor tear!
Never ghost Of slaile, and never sus-
picion of moisture! | was astounded.
closed the lecture at last with one despair
ing shriek--with one wild burst of humor
and hurled joke of supernatural atroci-
ty full at him! Then. sat down bewildered
and exhausted.
The president of the society came up and
bathed my head with cold water, and said:
g What made you carry on SO toward the
last?''
I said, :. I was trying to make that con-
founded cid idiot laugh, in the second row. !"
And he said. ]" Well. you were wasting
your time; because he is deaf and dumb,
and as blind as a badger
Now. was that any way FOR that old man s
nephew to impose ON q stranger and an Or
uIlan like me?
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
George Francis Train Offers to Compro-
mise With the Newspapers.

To The Editor of the New York Sun:
The following -am4eaied- lately i'll yonr
couIrnns:
"When George Francis Train was candi-
date for Dictator OF America he used to tell
us of five millions worth of lots that he
owned in the city of Omaha; and now the
Sheriff of Douglas county, Nebraska, offers
for sale twenty acres of these splendid lots
to raise money to pay an execution for $3,-
500 taxes and interest Alas for Train and
for Omaha, too! He says he is tired of
being pauper millionaire, and considers
Omaha u fraud
With pestilential financial communistic
uncertainty shooting through the air, sup
pose | ought to be indebted to the San for
starting this paragraph through its several
thousand exchanges, more especially as
millionaires will soon be at discount. In
asmuch, however, as it is not true, no por-
ton OF my five thousand lots being in the
hands of the Sheriff, nor offered for sale,
perhaps you will allow me to remain q
"pauper IL. illionaire" by making the amende
honorable. He who steals nay good name
steals that the press have never gwen me
but he that steals my purse steals mortgaged
property i'll the city Of the future of great
value.
am willing to make this offensive and
defensive compact with the newspapers.
IL they will let me severely alone will agree
never to speak again in public, to publish
another book, OF write another letter to
newspaper.
am now satisfied that the many strange
events of my ever-changing life, which |
supposed was enacting out of some grand
principle to benefit humanity, had no motive
higher than that thing they call fame,
ambition, popularity, self, or a morbid love
of notoriety! did not know this at the
time, and only discovered it since abstaining
from all kinds of animal food.
Should the coming disasters elevate the
moral sense of the people to my standard
am willing to shake hands with them again.
Meanwhile am not at home to friends or
foes, simply asking to be let alone.
GEO. FRANCIS TRAIN.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
The Science Of Music.

Sam Slick didn't admire the opera.
G What tlis?" he exclaimed, Just look
at that gail at the pianny; airth ard seas
what crash. 1t seems as ii she would
bang the instrument into a thousand pieces.
/ guess she's vexed at sssincbeay, and she's
peggin' the piasny oat Of spite Now
comes the singin'. See what faces she
makes. She Stretches her mouth open and,
turns up the white of her eyes like duck
in thunderstorm. She's in a musical ec-
stacy; she feels good all over. But hello. !.
What nader the sun ii she about now ?
WY, her voice is going dwa her throat
and comes oat as loarse rs mal's; and
that dandy feller along sideof her is singin'
the falsetIer. Why. they've actually
changed voices; the gal sings like man
and that gcreanier like a woman. This is
science; this is taste; this is fashion; but
hang me If 1t Ii nattir.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
How Gen. Forrest Liked to be Shaved.


The Civil Rights bin, says the Mobile
Reg may enable the colored gentlemen
to enjoy all the privileges of soda water
Fountains ice cream saloons. and billiard
rooms--but we would like to see him subject
his visage to the manipulation of IL white
barber. He would find himself in as dam
gerous position as Gen. Forrest.
1t is said that Forrest went into q barber
shop on Broadway TO be shaved. The
colored gentleman who officiated was volu-
ble. Forrest was in q good fumor and dis
posed to be talkative. At last it came out
that the gentleman who was being shaved
was called Gen. Forrest, whereupon the
colored gentleman wanted to know if he
was having the honor to shave Gen. Forrest
of the late Confederate cavalry. Gen. For
rest mildly sssented. Whereupon the
barber remarked. that he was glad to make
the Generals acquaintance, as his brother
was soldier i'm the Federal army. "Where
is your brother ?' asked the General s9Ie
was killed. ssr Fort fIluw:.- answered the
barber.
Silently and gently as the fall of the snow
fake--but accurately and without uthesitation
the General slid from beneath the razor
Of that barber, gained his feet, and with d
face bare as to one side, and lathered us to
the other, remarked: ~ on can't shave me
this morningn A friend who met him a
moment later, remarked the singular APP
pearance OF his face. The General merely
observed: Il like to have half my face
shaved at time
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
An independent Editor.

A Vermont editor has determined to take
a manly. independent and dignified stand
before the world He declares that here
after his very lowest charge for marriage
notices will be fifteen pounds of dried APP
ples, and that notices with poetry will cost
twelve pounds of onions additional This
we call sustaining the dignity of she press,
which has too often been degraded by puny
souled wretches who would take ten pounds
OF dried apples for marriage, and who
would throw in a hunk of poetry without
extra charge. With such men as this Ver-
monter in control of all the papers in the
country, the position of editor viii become
every day more elevated, and of more COM
lnanding influence. We expect to live TO
see the day when no man dare approach an
editorial room without carrying box of
cigars under one arm and bottle OF the
best brandy under the other. When that
time arrives, the press OF America viii have
attained position which will make it the
envy of the civilized world, and even the
unlettered savage viii respect IL. The YER
monter should at once be called to New
York. He is the only man in the country
with the exception Of E. Ludwig Kurtx)
that we are willing to regard as great. The
man who can originate 80 noble and soul-
thrilling battle cry ~, g Fifteen pounds
Of dried apples. or no marriage noticess" !"
possesses the true Aiefnassts 0f RraAtress.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
An Eel chokes Plymouth's Organ.

AS the tune marked ON the book for the
hymn was Coronation Mr.. Beecher,
after waiting few moments, became inn
patieut, and said if Plymouth church could
not sing an old tune like Coronation
without the organ, they had not been well
brought up in music.
BY this time the wind had arrived and
the organ and the choir struck up together
and shortly afterwards Joined by the lead
ership of Mr.. Camp, who, ON the discovery
of the difficulty had gone to the subterra-
mean passages beneath the organ to trace
its cause.
He woFy discoveries it; a large eel
bad made its way into one of the water
pipes, and actuated by desire either to
become member OF the church or the
choir, deemed it necessary previous thereto
to go through the ordinance of baptism.
The moment selected for this immersion
by the eel was ,nopportune, and Mr.. Camp
elected the fislly candidate from its berth
and thereby enabled the service of the
song to proceed with its usual organ accom-
paniment. Mr.. Camp describes the eel as.
one Of very fine proportions, and expressed
his intention to offer it as Sunday even
ing sacrifice at his supper table.-1N r.
Herald
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
i" The Monte King. y

William Jones, of Omaha, man who
has acquired an almost national reputation
as ssCanada Bill " is known among his
class as The Monte King" and is doubt
less the most successful and skillful shark
in the West. Several years ago, before the
Union Pacific was constructed, Jones turn
ed the highest trick on record-for $3S, 900.
1t was on Mississippi river steamboat, and
his victim was a wealthy planter, who was
SO blndly confident of his ability to win or
so desperately bent on making good his
loss, that he Immediately staked the bal
ance of his fortune, soma 1000, on an
other throw, when Bill was placed under
arrest. Of course, had they not been inter-
rupted, he would have lost the money.
Jones is a power in the city he has made
his home-owns three hotels and number
of saloons, and employs thirty to forty men
as decoys or "cappers. His operations
,-,7hld III and alm2fst M f inyaEiahx successful
Only once IN MS lie, so lar Us 1t is known,
did he suffer o wolsting, and that was at
the hands of an Iowa farmer, who deluded
him into paying for a wagon load of cheese
one day in Council Bluffs. The aroma Of
that cheese still clings to him, and is the
one sore spot in his memory no one can
touch without ruffling his temper. The
augurated war against the gamblers, and
attacked Jones rs the prominent figure
among them His misdeeds were so raked
mp and paraded under scare-heads,' that
the half reluctant authorities were obliged
to look after him. The sheriff, after te-
dious week of unsuccessful watching,
caught him one afternoon, in they very act
uf fleeing countryman, and took him
into custody. Out of Difference to popular
feeling, he was ordered to Jail, for twenty
days. BY convenient technicality, his
counsel procured his release ON the thir-
teenth day. He instantly departed for the
farther west. In just exactly one week he
returned, and meeting the city editor of the
Herald on Farnham street, took him into a
bar-room and exhibited roll of money.
There's just $12 900 there" said lie. 81
made it since | got out. Take suthin'!'
The next morning he was moneyless again.
Over night, he had struggled into a faro
bank and lost every cent of it. The stories
that are told of his shrewdness and folly
(for he is a man of weaknesses) would make
a very interesting book. His dupes are not
always OF the clodhoppcr sort. Occasional
ly he shears men who, from their calling
and experience, one would naturally sup
pose too sharp for any such foolishness.
The city editor of the New York Herald
lost his money, his luggage, and his wife's
jewelry to him, while stopping at Omaha
ON a trip across the continent. On another
occasion, Boston detective of consider;a-
able renown "took a walk with him, and
left his watch and wallet. There is nothing
at all in his appearance to indicate the
rogue. Tall, stoop-shouldered, angular,
and awkward, with weak eyes, and an idi-
otto half smile, apiping voice, a plainsman's g
dialect, he is a picture of unsophistication.
and therein lies half his success.-Ieter-
Ocean.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
EvE-ANGELICAL CORNER,

Maggie Mitchell loves pork and beans.
Euginie and Victoria keep up regular
cor respondence.
wedding presents to hire. ."--(St. Lou
is ADVERTISEMENT
DR.. Mary Walkers new pants have pis4
tolpockets. No trifiing now.
When Wisconsin Christian finds q
STANCE lady in his pew, he escorts her out
by the ear
An Iowa girl recently carried 470 pound
| hog down into cellar.
| Miss Nettis Power Houston, daughter of
the old hero of San Jacinto, is the gifted
poet of Texas"
| A sensitive girl has broken off the match
because he said she had a foot like raisin
| box.
| The Duchess of Edinburg may be very
unhappy in her relations with her mother
| in-law; but she has q parasol named after
| her, SO there now.
"Id hate to be in your Shoes" said a
woman of the East Side, yesterday, as she
was quarreling with a neighbor. "You
| couldn't get in them,'' sarcasticlly remark
ed the neighbor.
| A Brooklyn girl has just rejected suitor
around her. She says if she is going to
have lover at all she means to have good
| fit.
AT High Falls, New York, the otherday,
q young lady while crossing field was
| knocked down by ram, and the next time
| the damaged damsel saw her lover she in
formed that astonished youth that he might
| go about his business, as she was disguised
with the sex.
| The directors Of school district in Pre-
| BILE county, Ohio, recently discharged their
teacher, in the midst of his term, for repeat
ing to one of his pupils the following verse:
s aoodaRatk sR all df Cd With sRe whooppe couch.
The prettiest girl ever
| Was sticking cider through a straw.
1t is said that the young lady who was
engaged to Col. Ellsworth, and vowed eter-
nal celibacy for his sake, was not present
at the dedication of his monument, because
| 1T was not convenient for her to leave her
husband and children.
A miss, upon whose flaxen curls the suns
| OF fourteen summers had shed their fervor,
come home, the other afternoon, weeping
as if her heart would break, and meeting a
playmate, exclaimed, in paroxysm of
grief, go, Dora, we were engaged to bs
married, and charlie's got the measles!
The Dubuque Time is responsible for
| this: "Phebe Couzins doesn't dress like
her brothers of the bar," says the Chicago
| Tribune of Thursday, by way of commenc-
ing an item. That is undoubtedly true; she
dresses by putting her clothes over her
head, while they don't-and what's more,
| they can't. But what business is it to the
! Tribune, anyhow.
In ITO, the bride of a Governor of Pen.
sylvania who had to get her trousseau
from England, sent the following order:
A fine domestic cloth for twenty-one
shillings, neat fan Of leather mount for
twenty five shllings, needles, Nos. 5 to 10,
four pair of black calma shoes, eight dozen
cap wire and handsome spring silk" The
list also included the sending of a gown to
be dyed over, !" of any color which would
take best" For what it is now, SEQ report
of the Grant-Sartoris wedding.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
The signers Of the Declaration Of Inde-
pendence.

On looking over the immortal roll OF the
signers of the Declaration of Independence.
curiosity led us to examine from what stock
they sprang. We find that three Of them
were natives of Ireland, viz: Thornton,
Smith and Taylor, and one, Rutledge, Of
Irish ancestry two natives of Scotland,
Wilson and Witherspoon; one OF Wales,
Lewis; and one Of England, Robert Morris.
There are, also, three of direct Welsh
origin, Williams, Floyd, Originally Lloyd,
and Lewis Morris; three of Irish, Carroll,
Read and Mexican; two of Scotch, Hooper
and Livingston one of Swedish, Morton;
one of Norman, Bartlett; and one Of Aus
tralian, Lynch. ss.
The others are of old English stock gen.
orally /; though there 10 Welsh blood in the
ancestry of John Adams, Clymer, GWinnett
Originally Gwynnedd) and probably Hewes,
and perhaps Robert Morris. Morris was
born in Lancashire, near Wales, and frem
the name there cannot be much doubt OF
his Welsh origin. Clymer and his wife,
the daughter Of Reese Meredith Originally
Meredydd), were both Of Welsh origin.
The thirteen signers from New EngIilnd
were generally direct deBcendents from tha
puritans. - Resaea Qdsanaaxeses nafls18n.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
Buffers Nephew in an Affair of Honor.

~ashinetn nisratch dpaaa YEa:s a. to Bnitmnre Amer
A duel was arranged to take place in
g Rum Row." near the National Theatre.
about o'clock this morning, the principals
being Col. George Fl. Butler, a nephew OF
Gen. B. f. Butler, and formerly American
Consul General to Egypt, and Gen. Greene,
who is well known here. all the prepara-
tions had been made, the seconds chosen
and the pistols loaded. Mr.. Nit Jones, the
proprietor of the billiard saloon over the
theatre, was selected to load the same. The
men took positions, and, when Mr.. Jones
advanced to place the caps ON the pistols,
friends interfered, and the duel was thus
prevented. 1t is said, however, that it will
take place in % few days in the White Lot
south of the Executive Mansion. Col.
Butler has fought several duels. Recently
he was made prominent by receiving chal-
lenge from Florence, the comedian, while
he was performing in this city. Butler
accepted and arrived here the following day,
and met Florence in the Arlington. They
settled the difficulty over bottle of wine,
and both attended a ball that night given by
the Americus Yacht Club. This last affair
is creating considerable talk. The objection
to fight onthe part of Greene was because
he did not like to shoot in the dark.
The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1874-07-18
POETRY.
+" CRITICISM. I"

Crude, pompous, turga," th. reviewers said
= Shsm passion sham power To IuTn one sick
Pihwhs els of verse that spnttertd we read
Rockets of hymn, that showed the falling stick r
But while, assaulted of this buzzing band
The poet qui.e al their little stiugs,
White doves ot sympathy er all the land
ent Il, :ng with HIS fame bsneat1 tnclr wings!
And every fresh year brought him love that cheers
AS Caspian waves bling amber 10 their shore.
And it beftl that after many years,
Being now no 'onger young, he wrote once more.
:. Cold classic, polished, the reviewers said;
81 book scarce can love, huWe'cr you praise
We missed the old careless grandeur read,
The power and passion ot his younger days"
-EdGar FQaUcett IN Atlantic