Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1874-04-10
IN THE HUB.
What a Southern Woman Think :
of Boston.

What a Southern Woman Thinks
of Boston.
A young lady of Holly Springs,
Miss, has been residing for some
months in Boston, aud indites there
from to the Memphis Avalanche Cos
sipy. witty, humorous epistle, from
which we clip the following:
MORAL LIGHT HOUSE,
| March 4th, 1874.
| Dear Avalanche:-A six months So
| journ in the hub has developed in me
a yearning love for the land that I
thought particularly dull. until I got
| away from it, and it is with feelings of
| peculiar delight that [ open q South
ern correspondence through your col
umns.
| AS a rule, the people bosn the other
side of Mason and Dixon's line do not
meander as far North as this; hence
am sort of rara avis, and owe a GER
tuin social distinction to my Southern
| birth, for which am duly grateful, as
| the conditions of success in this city
are not easy of attainment. For the
| native Bostonian there are three paths
to glory. If his name be Quincy or
Adams, nothing more is expected of
| him. His blue blood carries him
through life with glory and straight to
heaven when lie dies, not q question
| being asked by the fisherman who
| keeps the golden keys when his card
of Introduction is handed in. Failing
in the happy incident of birth, the
| candidate for Beacon Hill honors must
write book. This is easy. The man
who can breathe Boston air and not
write book is either fool or a phe-
| nOmenon. One course remains to him
| should he miss fame in both these
lines. He must be a reformer. Moth
ing must be too huge for him to tackle.
| or too wild for him to advocate.
AS for me, it is considered my mis-
fortune rather than my fault, that [
have not had the advantages of Boston
birth and culture ; and I am treated
with distinguished consideration, al
though the South is not in good odnr
here. All the glor. of whipping us
cam never qmte compensate for our
years of past luxury and ease, and
scorn Of Yankee ''thrift." And so. as
| "Southern representative" they take
it out on me. [ am bounced upon by
the people with ''views," and forced to
do battle for my country iu Il way that
is pretty. but not convincing. For the
fatal element III the character of the
Bostonians is that you can't teach
them anything. What they don't know
isn't worth being known. There is 10
subject connected with tie heavens
above or the earth beneath that thew
have not sounded with their plummet
lines and toached its bottom. When peo-
pie get this far along there is no hope
for them in any earthly teaching and
| rather think it will go hard with them
to have to play second fiddle in
heaven.
IF had been God,' said serene
matron to me, not long since-she re-
Joiced in two hundred pounds avoirdu-
pOls and sensitive soul''-'sif ] had
been God 1 could have arranged the
world on much better plan. In the
matter of death, for instance. how
much nicer it would be for people to
exhale, or dry up, or something, than
to become all worms-pah - And her
aristocratic nose took an upward ten
dency copied after Edwin Booths
Hamlet iii the grave digging scene.
l endeavored to console her by Il
suggestion of the immense benefit she
would be to her native land as q fertil-
lzer that millions yet unborn would
taste her sweetness IN various vcgete-
table forms but finding that she still
harped upon the worms, l advocated
burning as especially suite,I' to her
case, as there was something sweetIy
poetic in the thought that she NIGH: |
have herself gathered togetherin small !
urns with the Inscriptions suitable to |
the various parts of the collection 10 |
be retained among her friends as or
naments and souvenirs. She seemed |
quite struck by my remal ks, which |
pleased me much, az it is not often
that these profound thinkers receive
my ideas favorably. They set traps
for me. They ask me questions about
the South, and / branch ont into ROSY
descriptions of Mardi Gras andsother
elegancies. They listen eagerly until
L get through, when they sorrowfullv
sigh, lies, yes. Such is Southern
existence, Shows and pageants! No
Of the true uses of lifc!"
And then they turn upon me with
startling statistics, and abstruSe spec
and blood curdIrg theories,
until my Southern brain whirls, and |
long for the wings Of a dove, that
might lice away and b" at rest But it
Is vain desire, for it is SO delicious
to these reformerS to meet n person
who has not planned ont better uni
verse on her own account. that 7 am
preyed upon Oh all sides rs n possible
and my life IS burden from
my frantic attempts to comprehend
how these things are thus. | used to
argue; but dear me! / soon CAV, that
II. being whippel out ignominiously,
Early III the action. these people
lave a way of talking about the Intin- I
tie, and looking into the cause of I
Kings, that is enough to bleach the ,
lair of an outsider who tries to keep
he pace. ,
"Can You tell me-" said a lady on
he wlry-curl order, ''the difference in !
ime between New York and Liver
,ool?" !
l was stranger, young and unsus- c
'ecting. was glad: of an opportunity
# showing the extent of my informa- y
ion, and SO [ dimpled all with miles.
nd said that when it was noon in New y
,ork It was about 4 o'clock in Liver q
DOL. Then. like the ancient mariner, !;
id she fix me with her glttering eye,
nd in sepulchral tones, GLOW do you n
now" said she. !,
The shock of the questionable T
iassy triumph of her staggered +
lie. -Four of my five wits went halt Il
lg off. "Why-because"-I gasped. h
Onc lc1ly Stl11ened Ill her char. Just 6
5 I Supposed she said, aside to =
kindred spirit. Southern you h
now. Effects of the system q
Then the iron entered into my soul, Fl
nd folded my shawl like the Arabs; G
Id silently stole away. +;
Since that time I have been very
eek. g.
" Do you know" said a patronizing G
oung preacher, who had just told me =,
it'll swelling air of triumph that he
I'd uttered the profoundest thought of ;,
e century, i'll n book that was to =,
md his name (he name of jones'
>wn to eternal fame, ''do you know ~
hat oxygen and hydrogen are?" ri
was not to be caught again. I dt
obesity replied that l had a vague vi
as faint and elimmering as b
G light shining through q thousand in