The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1874-11-21

A.
Tho s. Louis G}obG speaks Of certain Ioi-
MINDED Nlissou;i orator as man who has
sleeping ear attacLod to his train Of thought
The cdt,or Of an agricultural paper which pub
li,hrd t., sentence, Make manure OF your ol'
lsddcr" wishes the last word changed to "fod
der"
Our apology for being late with this issue o
the H,ra,0 is, that one OF orr hands has been al
n!ctrd with tie sore eycs.-Hrdrd Re'ljr,
r That must be new disease on the hand.
Charles Honesty is a convict in the VifGini,
state Prison. His best policy was hor,ei!e,h
unfortunately -NelcS.
Pause, rash youth, if you are in the HABIT Of
remoying the postage stamp from your ewcet
hearts letter and pressing the under side Of the
stamp to your lips, under the rapturous dcluson
| that hcr honcd labals gave it adhesion to the
Icnyclopc-oh, pause! for Williams, Of the Nor
ristown Herald, detected, at the post.oiicc the
other morning, his y.loyc's fathers coIored
coachman applying the stamp to the last letter
she sent him. SO perishcs forever another o.
loves young dreams!
/ The Ripso,c, paper just started in Mississippi
proposes to make things buzz
The sturgi,, Mich, JouynaI keeps the follow
| ing two items in close proximity to eacL o'hef'
"Bustlcs are the style again
/ "Old paper, for sale at this ONCE.
| \ savannah paper says II pail OF water be
placed within six inches of either side OF the
stem OF pumpkin or vegetable marrow i VIII
IN the course Of the night approach H.
A still more extraordinary phenomenon has
been observed in Joliet. There is a man IN that
city who will approach a barrel Of whisky either
by day or night, even If ii were placed six feet
away from him.
a st. Paul paper, in announcing the a:nuse-
mcnt. for the season, said; We don't know
who follows the Ministries"
Il was a hotel Landlord, and lie followed them
all the way from Milwaukee with an unpaid
board bill.
The secret of Chicago's competency over her
dcsertiOn by the fire insurance companies may
tic traced to the fact that any one Of her girls
could stamp out the next great confagration
that come. alorg.-DnnbUy Nctrs.
An exchange observes that when SIX young
ladies sit down 70 talk about dress, small boy
with tin horn is a refuge for the weary.
The small boys in Vallejo, Cal, need moral or
religious instruction. Tho Vallejo IndepeU6t OF
oct eth says; 4 little boy scarcely six years
old was standing on one Of the principal corners
up street Yesterday afternoon crying pitcously.
one Of our officers approached him and asked
him what was the matter. The y0ungster blur
ted out: i don't know where my father is.
told the OLD sucker not 10 90 far or he would
lose me-"
The Joliet HppbAcUs under the head Of IVES
tern Patents, publishes the following:
AN Oshkosh Judge got t.o bar, Of soap for a
marriage fee
A Kentucky paper says, with the beginning
Of the year we will reduce our business 20 q cash
basis. Cord wood and potatoes taken for sub.
scription.'
This bricI chronicle was written By the editor
OF the Philadelphia Layer LowcI->aluiday
Two little bops and pistol
a Norwich preacher" says the BalItd", said
Amen last Sunday afternoon with 50 much
emphasis that several louu"crs at 4 Main street
drug store started up brcathlessly into the street
under the impression that on alarm Of fire had
been raised"
i religion, exchange complains that sunday
in the churches have fallen off in
amount since the issue Of ten cent currency re.
sembling in appearance the fifty cent bills.
The latest feature Of the chrome business
comes from Dexter Me. They have a church
there which gives chrome TO every new con.
vert.
The melancholy days have come,