Knoxville journal. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1874-1986, 1874-08-20
Publishing Marriage Engagement is.

come engaged, it is their custom, as most
folks know, to announce the important
fact in the newspapers. Among the adj
yertisements of State lotteries, forth
coming operas, cigars of some famous
"Fabrik," and "echtes Wiener" APP
pears notice of the accomplished
Verlobung," in which the names of the
two lovers are united by tender little
hyphen. As a general rule the compact
is then considered indissoluble, and there
are not many who are bold or wicked
enough to forsake the engagement thus
publicly recorded, and to give all their
good-natured friends that opportunity
for talking scandal which they deplore
at the same time that they hasten to use
it. However, accidents will occur; and
sometimes the A." Verlobung" is broken
asunder by the hard exigencies of life.
Most people, in such a case, prefer to say
nothing about it, Isle hat die Treu
gebrochen, das Ringlein list entzwei,"
sings the heart-broken lover who goes
away into strange lands and is in great
grief until he finds some other young
console him for his loss. But at
rare intervals passion of re-
morseful honesty seizes the forsaken
one, and causes him to tell the public
frankly of what has befallen him. Such
an instance, we are told, has just oc-
CURED; and the young man, in advertis-
ing the fact that the engagement formal
ly announced has been broken off by his
sweetheart, states her reason. To his
regret, he says, she "did not find in my
department that gravity which she had "a
right to expect" This looks like very
extreme modesty at first sight; but 1t is
much more probable that it contains
some covert sarcasm, along with an eX-
cuse flattering to the young mans vanity
and ,self-respect. The sarcasm is di-
rected against the lady, of course; for
he rejected lover is by circumstance, il
not by nature, revengeful. She wanted
gravity; let other young men be warned!
AS for himself, he was no gray-beard, full
of portentous saws and burdened with
decorum. He was rather gay young
dog; the marriage state was, perhaps, of
too much dignity and responsibility for
him; much as he regrets it, he must
allow his charming fiancee to go else
where for a solemn and venerable spouse.
Whether that be the explanation or not
of the announcement, 1t is at least one
that the young man could carry with him
into society in his search for new bride.
Now there can be no doubt that the
publicity attending such matters in Ger
many is very useful at times. A fright
full amount of mischief is frequently
caused in England by the extreme shy
ness of maidens who secretly pledge
themselves to marry, and remain pro
foundly anxious that the fact should not be
known. To begin with, unwelcome suit
ors hang about the house, and the ac-
ceptcd lover is driven to his wits end by
jealousy; while the former are kept
idling their time away in fooling
round" a girl who regards them not,
when the neighbors begin to talk, and
an indefinite amount of scandal is pro-
duced. Elderly persons, who ought to
be at home saying their prayers, will de-
vote hours to watching how many times
in one evening a particular young man
dances with "a particular young woman,
and afterward 90 about declaring how
that shameful creature is deceiving her
parents. BY and by the secret oozes out
within a certain circle; but the outside
public knows nothing of it and is left
free to make comments if it find those
two young persons treating each other
with too much familiarity. The lover
stumbles into thousand vexations every
| day. If there is one thing more than an
other that drives him wild ii is to hear
his divine Clarinda's name mentioned by
others and to be "chaffed" about his
intentions. OF course, if the young
men knew, they would as soon think OF
tickling the snout of a doing alligator as
Of bantering a man really engaged about
any such thing. Then the young lady is
pleased TO learn that her continual meet
ing with "A certain gentleman in the row
in the morning has been remarked; and
curious elderly folks broadly hint that they
would really like to know if there is
"anything in it," OF course there is
much in all this secrecy that girl likes.
She is willing TO let a few friends know;
but to proclaim to the world her rela-
tons with the sutton savors to her OF I'M
maidenly boldness. She is not SO slow
to sanction the publication of a marriage
advertisement. Then she feels that the
die is cast. But the German girl Is
pretty much of the same opinion when
gagemcnts which have been thus public
" announced are seldom broken off.
Marriages come to grief as well as en-
gagcments; there is no certainty in life,
however amiable and trustworthy the En-
glish John and German Hans may appear
in the eyes of his beloved one. Senti-
ment aside, there are social advantages
accruing from the frank publication Of
the fact of an engagement which are OBJ
vious to the friends Of the engaged young
people, If not TO themselves
But these advantages are as nothing
compared TO those which would attend
the custom Of formally and publicly
giving notice when an engagement is
broken off OF all the incidents of life
there is scarcely one which gives rise to
such an intolerable amount Of scandal
as cancelled engagement Of marriage.
Speculation is set afiIe by it in a thou
sand directions; and the more simple
and obvious the real reason for the cir.
cumstance happens to be, the more
scornfully it is secuted by alarmed and
puzzled, but also delighted, friends.
Scarcely anybody who is in the remOtest
degree associated with either OF the two
principal folks escapes the mitraileuse
shower of suggestions and suspicious,
Whine the girl herself, though she be as
tender as Juliet, as wise as Portia, and
as hardly entreated as Ophelia, is sure
tn he called all manner of names by