The weekly clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1863-1882, 1874-06-04
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VARIETIES.
If you see a policeman aim at dog
to-day get near the dog.

If you see policeman aim at DO
to-day get near the dog.
When a fault is discovered. it Is we
to look up virtue to bear it company
Why are cashmere shawls like dea
people? Because you can't make then
here.
A teething baby in the adjoining room
will not fill IA bachelors soul with joy t.
any vast extent
Laws, like sausages, would f,il to in
spire respect if all people knew now the,
were made.
Admire your landlady's new jocky ha
and feather, if you want porter-hous,
steak for breakfast.
Cremationists everywhere think how
noble it will be to heap Goals of fire upon
the heads of their acquaintance.
The bill for the admission OF New
Mexico as State yesterday passed the
House by the decided vote Of 100 to 81.
A French fancy for summer parlors Is
to use furniture slips Ct Swiss muslin.
trimmed with futed rutfies TO match the
curtains.
Very provoking, says Mr. QuiIp, to
find that your mother-in-law has hidden
your glasses after you've bought a
ticket for Miss Thompson.
Pittsfield men and women, it seems,
keep coffin plates on their mantle-pieces
for ornaments. They will like cremation,
of course; urns will look much prettier
than cotfin-plates
Il am not afraid Of a barrel Of cider"
said topper to Il temperance man. Il
presume not, was the reply; from
your appearance | guess a barrel Of cider
would run at your approach.
Mr.. Alcorn presented memorial from
the citizens Of Mississippi ON the 10Th,
praying the government to take charge OF
the levees on the Mississippi river Re
ferred to a Select Committee ON Levess-
Mr. H. NJ Swami, Deputy United
States Marshal, paid the coast a flying
visit this week Mr.. Swami is an ntfable,
courteous gentleman, and makes friends
wherever he goes. Hausboro Democrat.
Imagine the agony of Il Richmond moth
er who has lost her infant, when she says
to its mate: "You Jawrge Washington.
quick, 'splain youself, chile-stop dat
artool smile-whar you bin done wi de
baby"
1t is wonderful the amount Of snappsh
ness and incivility that can be crowded
into a. narrow minded. bilious clerk. You
can only realize it by asking a simple
question, especially if the employer be
absent.
Another fine illustration Of thatNan<ee
ingenuity about which we hear 50 much,
Is the discovery that the best way to
escape the annoyance OF water-bugs run
ming about the floor, is to pull oil their
legs.
Put not your faith in him who predicts
IA hot season-he keeps ice; nor IN him who
predicts cold one-he owns q cheap
clothing store; nor him vino predicts wet
one--he has umbrellas; nor dry one-he
sells beer
On the New Orleans and Jackson Rail
road, we have two freight trains passing
4. i. i al.
uo"ii 10y az IL
1ral''s are P'iselei '" 5t r., ~ H.
o"e in,y R Jan ~, r. Wv
0'''i' ~ : ~ -
The veto has no more to do with the
future ofthe Republican party than ID
has with the Tower OF Babel. The fglt
70 Pt i5 9 ,ao,,e, 5,,o. Of the East-Oma
~, Pon" II, %., Rsyd;coI
ii'' i'' P'''''o'''i
Laconic funeral Grafton by an Arzan-
sas poker-pIayer: "Gentemen, my part
ner never killed man unless he thought
he had a reason for it, and when be
stocked the cards it was done in the
tbe man tbst saws he hasn't zone 10 bea-
-, y
Nowadays, when a white-chokered gen
tleman is observed getting ont ola neigh
borhood at the rate Of FIVE miles an hour,
with look of fierce determination in his
.a,,, and ., ..,,ratLbae, II, his hand the gen
oral irnnraesinn seams to be that he i go
ing off somewhere TO start ane" religious
denomination.
oorrosnordon+ If tho T 3ckson Ten
.,oS WI. o,,a ,T,;b,,,,e. ,t,4a. tbat old