Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1874-04-11
AN APPETITE FOR OYSTERS.

JOD UlVenS IS from Tie lutuDeT region
of Wisconsin, and until day or so
ago, had never eaten an oyster. It
wasn't his fault, only his misfortune.
Job belonged to the truly rural, and
somehow or other oysters had never
come in Job Givens' way.
For some reason Job had drifted to
St. Louis to find something to do, and
by chance he came, two days ago, to
where an oyster dealer was packing
oysters in boxes. Job stood looking on
for about an hour, and then he said to
the oysterman:
! "Say, captain, what hev you got in
them things?"
Baltimore oysters"
"Oysters, eh I'd like to have one
of 'em"
"One CAM"
"No, one oyster I've heard tell on
em. Pears to me I'd like to have one
mighty WELL"
The oysterman took Job Givens in
side and picked out an oyster from the
tureen. Job Givens wasn't favorably
impressed. He turned it over and over
on the fork, put his tongue to it, smelt
it, and still he couldn't make up his
mind exactly what to do with it.
| It's all right, I suppose ? said
job.
"Of course it's all right"
Job put it cautiously to his mouth,
and the moment it came off the fork it
slid down his throat.
We'll, I'm darned," said Job Civ
ems, " if that arn't queer; the crittcr
didn't give fellow any show, Say,
major, cant you stand unother?'
The oystermnn forked out another to
see the fun, and this one Job took good
care to taste. He caught it in his teeth,
and there he held it, afraid to let it go.
At length it went the way of all oysters,
and Job said quietly:
cts big thing, to it's looks, any
how. Say, colonel, how many's in one
of them tins?'
Four or five dozen"
" Is that fact? Say, arn't got any
money, But I'd like to work out one OF
them tins"
The oysterman wanted help, and so
he said to Job, Pitch in, then, and
earn your can"
After working couple of hours, car
rying up boxes and doing the rough
work, Job stopped and asked him for
his tin. 1t was given to him, and then
the trouble was to open it. He had
about as clear an idea of doing this as
he had of reading Hebrew.
At last they opened the can for him,
and he sat in the cellar pouring the
oysters down his throat out of the can.
They offered him fork and a plate,
but that process was too slow for Job
Givens. When he had finished his can
Job wanted to know if he couldn't work
out another tin, and the oysterman set
him to work again.
At the end of another two hours Job,
who had worked enough for two men
under the inspiration of coming oysters,
asked if he had earned his tin; and
took his old seat in the cellar and dis
posed of the second can in about the
same manner as tho first. All he said
was that they were "big things to their
looks"
And still the oysterman kept on pack
ing boxes and Job Givens kept on work
ing like steam engine, and at the ex-
piration of every two hours, taking his
tin into the cellar, and pouring the oys-
ters down his capacious throat. At
eleven o'clock at night Job had worked
thirteen hours, and had six cans of oys-
ters slowed away under his waistband.
All that he said after every can was,
II tell you, general"-he had breveted
the oysterman all the way up from cap
tain" them's the biggest things to
their looks that ever I fell in with"
. * The cost of educating cadet at
West Point is said to be eight thousand
dollars, or two thousand for each of the
four years of the course.
E The Government Bureau of En-
craving and Printing, at Washington,
employs ,405 men, with salaries amount
ing to $500, 900.
~ According to an Ohio mathemat-
ician, one man dies every seven minutes