American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1874-05-23
CURRENT ITEMS.

was all.
VIRGINIA boasts of blue horse, the
only one ever heard of.
WYOMING has finally decided to call its
female Justices Justices of the Peaces,"
and TO fine any one who growls about
grammar.
A. KANSAS girl wouldn't be married
without yellow ribbon around her waist,
and boy rode eight miles to get it while
the guests waited.
IT is said that if women didn't talk so
much most of them would live to be ninety
years old, but what object would life be
if they couldn't talk
A KENTUCKY farmer says that three
good bulldogs roaming the yard nights
will do more to keep-a man honest than
all the talking in the world.
Mrs. WILLIAMS, of La Crosse, talk ed
too much, and her husband filled her
mouth with waters, but the court decided
that this wasn't no wafer to stop her and
fined Williams $25.
ONE-HALF the world doesn't know how
the other half lives. For the benefit of
the first half it may be stated that John
Giddey, of Illinois, has eaten nothing but
boiled eggs for six months past. He is
yolked to his idol.
THE town of North Providence, r. L.,
has only one pauper to support. This in
dividual has farm all to himself, with
carriage, horses and cattle, food provided
by contract, and poormaster and family
to take care of him.
THE Byunsnicker, of Missouri, says
"There is an undetinable something about
some men which commands our respect
whether we see them heading a conquer
ing squadron or bending in lowly toll
over an onion bed"
A PITTSBURGH man sold his wife the
other day for five dollars and a second
hand suit of clothes. She heard of the
transaction before the delivery took place,
and his neighbors say it will probably
cost him about fifty dollars to get well
again.
A MAN in the Philadelphia insane asy-
lum imagines himself a woman. He
dresses in female attire and parts his hair
in the middle. During the day he asso-
ciates with the females and does sewing
and embroidery of the finest kind.
A DANBURY house cat was cremated the
other morning. She had crept into the
kitchen oven during the night, and in the
the oven was opened to bake the break
fast rolls her remains weighed but thir
teen and three-quarters ounces.
We observe a tendency among news
paper writers to indulge in redundant ex-
pressions. For instance, the Louisville
Courier Journal says: 1.-Two physicians
are in attendance, and it is thought he
cannot recover" 1t would have been
sufficient in this case to have said simply
d" Two physicians are in attendance"-
Neao York Mail.
A GENTLEMAN connected with the press
of this city celebrated on the 2d of May
his birthday, his wife's birthday and his
weddingday. 1t was the twentieth ami
versary. When married, the joint ages of
his wife and himself were fifty years. On
the last I'd of May the joint ages of his
children were fifty years. These coinci-
dences are rather Observation-Disclosures
Enquirer.
In Lawrenceburg, Tenn, a tax-collect-
or named Weaver killed Justice of the
Peace Green when the latter " wasn't pre-
pared" On his death-bed Green vowed
that he would haunt his murderer night
and day for taking his life without fair
play" And sure enough the ghost of the
slain has driven the slayer crazy by its
constant presence. Such is the story.
THE Chicago police have found den
where forty boys are kept in charge of an
old scoundrel who is training them to
beggary. He sends them out in the
morning with the understanding that
each boy returns at night with fifty cents
or partakes of a t1ogging in default. The
ages of the boys range from seven to ten
years, and most of them are hired out by
their parents for one dollar a week to
their intellectual employer.
CONGRESSMAN. LAMAR spoke like a true
patriot when, in rendering the South's
tribute of respect to the memory of
Charles Sumner, he exclaimed: "My
t1,ap-
will loee one another" But, granting
that we possessed that knowledge, how
many of us could put our hands in our
pockets and respond to the request for
the loan of quarter with unhesitating
contidence?-Brooklyn argus.
THE girls of California seminary late
ly developed a singular fancy for using
three onecent Stamps instead of the reg
ular kind upon their envelopes. The
letters were so very plain and matter-of-
fact, and the attempts at evading surveil-
lance IN the old fashioned way grew so
scarce, that one inspecting teacher inves-
tigated this within. And 10! the cunning
creatures had taken to writing tender,
emotional little epistles to their lovers
under the stamps.
A COUPLE of facetious drummers who
were on II train or cars that was going
very slowly up sharp grade near Bur
lington, VT, the other day, made cOnsid-
cradle fun ef the conductor for the slow
ness with which the cars were moving,
and began to amuse themselves by jump
ing off from the rear car and running
around the train. Soon, however, the
cars reached the top OF the hill and began
to spin off at a rapid rate. One of the
men succeeded in jumping on, but the
other was compelled to walk four miles to
the next station.
THERE is a man in Iowa who is thought
to be a lunatic from the fact of his declar
ing that his wife is witch, and that he
can see her flying around the room astride
of a broom. 1t is sad indeed, to cOntem-
plate such a wreck of mind in a fellow
man. And sadness is intensified until it
borders upon unutterable apprehensions
when one reflects upon the awful conse-
quences that sometimes arise from so
trivial circumstance as the suggestion
on the part of a husband to the partner of
his domestic joys that perhaps-only per
haps-that last spring bonnet could be
made over into one that might do this
season.
COULDN'T BLUFF IIER.-Among the
waiting passengers at the Cent? al depot
were a widow woman and five children,
and -and-by man who was waiting for
the same train opened a conversation
with the widow and soon remarked that
he'd like to marry just such a little wom-
an. Here, Susan, hold this satchel!"
said the woman, turning to her oldest
daughter, and then, reaching for the mans
arm, she continued: I've been looking
for you about five yearsr' Everybody
shouted and jumped in glee, and when
the scapegoat backed Hat down they said
he ought To be dumped in the river.-De-
tr0H Free Press