The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-09-18
CATCHING A TARTAR.

1
seen a young blood. He is the son of his
young blood because he bleeds the old
man: The young blood tolls not, neither
does he spip-but his head spins once in a
while. Well, there were four of them. 1t
was Sunday night. They hao been out to
Rinkle's and were coming home on the St.
Charles rock road. They sat in two
seated buggy, drawn by dashing span of
bays. Presently they come to the large
open common at the intersection of the
rock road and Kings highway.
Here an episode occurred. You have all
seen an episode.
1t is something sudden.
And so unexpected.
1t seizes you with amazement. Trans
| fixes you with awe. In this instance the
| episode mashed your nose.
A countryman was driving home in a
lowly truck-wagon drawn by an aged aud
methodical gray horse. The young bloods
came dashing up with their prancing bays.
The young bloods were beery.
But the countryman had about two
drinks of whiskey in him and hence had
the advantage.
a gill of whiskey contains the same
amount of fight as a gallon of beer; aud
then it is SO much handler and less cumber-
some.
The young bloods drew rein and the
countryman hallooed whoal The y. b.
asked the C. if he could tell them where
they were going.
The profane c. told them ''to hell.
Then one of the y. b. said you're a
| blank d liar. F"
At this the countryman laid down his
lines and got out of his truck wagon right
in the middle of the road, and made a
speech as follows ''You roosters has lit
on the wrong fence. Just one of you stay
in the wagon and hold the horses and the
other three git right out here. l ken lay
all the dust between here and town with
ye Oh, I'm the feller that ken keep the
| flies off I'm better than eny muskeeter
bar. Just one of you hold them horses
my old mare Ii stand without hitchin' and
the balance just waltz to Joseph right here
now Come on git out r' And the irate
|
the canine parentage of the young bloods.
Then he danced and pranced up and down
| the road and kicked at the horse cars and
gyrated his long arms and threw his old
sloucb hat high up in the air: ''Oh, I'm
| a catamount, | am. / like to be stopped
| in the middle of the road, l do. I'm a
four-year- old bull PAWN up big clouds
right out of the ground, l am. I'm whole
menagerie of royal Bengal tigers, and a
cage of grizzly bears. I've fit in the ring,
have. Git out here Git out, l say, and
| IN show you whar you're goin' p
Then three of the young bloods pulled
off their coats and accepted the pressing
invitation. The other sat in the buggy
and held the horses. He was the lucky
| one He could go to see his girl the next
night, if he wanted to, and not have to tell
| her that he had been out to the base ball
match and got hit with the ball. The best
place in that vicinity was IN that buggy,
holding the horses.
Well; the three bounded out. Then the
countryman set those long arms going, and
the three Immediately imagined that the
hot spell had bro't on a tornado, accom-
panied by an earthquake and enlivened by
| rapid strokes of lightning.
That countryman seemed to have about
| fifteen fists.
sI'n tell you whar you're going; he
| yelled. as the first of the three tried to
climb over the fence on his east ear.
"Thar's whar you're goin' - he shrek
ed, as the second of the three executed
back somersault in the ditch
can this is the way for you to travel"
he yelled, as tire last of the three tried to
balance himself ON his nose IN the middle
of the road.
He started for the lucky fellow who was
| in the wagon hol6ing the horses; but the
lucky fellow let the horses go and got out
of the way.
/ Then he made another speech, as fol-
lows: ooh, I'm an earthquake, am. Pm
, a volcano right from the bowels OF the
earth. Give me some more nuts to crack
Give me some more raw meat to chaw upP'
The three slid off behind the fence, down
to where number four sat holding the
horses, and then slid softly into that bug
gy, and the buggy slid quietly into town,
and then the three slid furtively into
drug store. They had been out to see the
base ball match and got hit with a ball.
They knew where they were going the
balance of that trip. At all events they
did not inquire of any more countrymen,
quietly driving home in their truck-wagons.
St Louis Republican.
WHERE 1T CANE FRoM.-1t is stated
that the tomato was first grown In this
country at Portland, Me-, in 1916, from seeds