Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1874-05-01

They say that pretty women's tears Ottei
melt Il heart OF stone. That when plead
ing voice and manner have failed, thos;
crystal drops reprcach the heart and con
quer opposition. l cannot say that rny
heart was in a fossil state, yet those tears
eXerted mental influence over it. In fact
it seemed to turn on its axis, and BASS from
night into day.
My love- said l, kissing away the tears,
if you can derive $500 worth Of happiness
in the possession of piano, I'll order g
dozen and your bliss will be eternal
The piano came. 1t took four or tive
men to carry it in, and they grunted and
pulled like porpoises over the exertion ; /
wondered at the fuss they made, until
attempted to carry in two of its legs, ono
of which dropped with considerable weight
! upon my toes, ana-then L left off wonder
/ ing and went into the hop and ,c(hfnt
business.
! And, after the animal had been properly
! housed, and the men had departed, my
wife came in, threw her arms around my
neck, put her cherry lips 10 mine, declaring
was dear good fellow, and assured me
Of her loving gratitude. replied by kiss
! ing her fondly in return and saying that
she was kiss damask rose whose beauty
filled my heart.
And now, love- said L, pointing to the
naked instrument, you must go to work
and make pantaloons for the dear crea-
ture, and put a covering on It's back for
fear Of the rheumatism
Yes, dear and when you go out, please
see to engage a frst-class teacher, l am
anxious to commence learning to pay at
once
not dreamed Of But my liberality and
good nature had carried me thus far, and
must not rebel now.
! So the teacher came also; or, to speak
in more distinguished manner, the Pro
| fesser.' He was French music master
/ too, and his name was Monsieur Victor De
Slamanbang.
Ny wife called me in one time after three
or four lessons had been given, (price 81. on
per lesson), to hear him play. He was 4
small very nervous individual with bullet
head, and a muslache waxed q Ia Napoleon.
He wore gold spectacles and walked as
softly as n cat.
'Ah, Monsieur = said he, dancing before
ME, and puckering up his mouth till the
waxed ends of his mus.ache stuck out like
snail's horns, and rubbed his hands inces-
sanity, 'Ah, Monsieur, Mademoiselle docs
h0nnsur-vat you call zat-ah! progress
very much finely
Yes but you'll please not dance your
feet on my toes, said savagely.
'Eh, Monsieur p
Il would like TO hear you tune up-play.
/ replied, mastering my feelings.
'Oui. Has Monsieur particular NOR
seau?'
No, I'm not particular, more so than
anybody else, said innocently.
Ha! la Monsieur not comprehend.
Not Eat you say but Monsieur's favorite,
,norceau pour le piano how you say zat--
ah' piece p
Oh, you wish to know if 1 have any
favorte piece I'd Ike to have you per-
form -
'Om, Monsieur
Let NE see. There's one called Prairie
Flower
i know not zat.' said he puzzled
Prairie Flenr not in mon reportaire.'
Il know nothing about rappinLOres, said
l. Play Shoe Fly; Thomas Dodd Put
me in my trundle bed, or any other man.
'Sacre Dieu: Monsieur frightens me. /
knows not zat, he exclaimed, throwing up
hs arms in confused manner, and arch
ing ND his eyebrows until they nearly crept
on top of his head. Eat is not famil-yar
zat sounds strange Lot remember l no
tink Of dat. l play, monsieur, somesing
myself
| sat down in anticipation of a rich treat.
Raising his hands high in the air, and
bending his back considerably over the
back part Of the stool, he paused thus just
one wild instant; then down came the
quivering hands with such an unearthly
crash, that l bounced up at the sound as
if q shell had exploded underneath my
chair. A second time did he perform the
agoniziug feat, aud then spraug up with
! shudder and intertered.
'iIon Dieu Monsieur, vat is Ze matter p
| he exclaimed, astonished at my manner
and interruption.
'Matter.' said |, my teeth chattering,
| i would like to impress Monseer with the
| fact that the piano cost me $500; and it
amt an anvil or \ washboard, so treat it
| humanely and don't bust it y
Boost it Vat you call zat-I not COM
prehend.
i mean l don't want you TO come down
on it like thousand of brick In short |
don't wish you to break it,
Break y he exclaimed, opening his eyes
and mouth very wide at my words. All,
| Monsieur is in error. SGcTG Eat will not
break zat is strong. Ha zat YRS pre-
/ lude play-ze introductione.
Yes, Absalom, broke in my wife, he
was only playing the opening part, the in
PRODUCTION to the Gallop l am sure he un-
derstands the use of the piano.
Yes, my dear, think he does, l replied
earnestly, he can scratch ivory better than
any man l ever heard of. Suppose, Mon
sieur, you leave out the intro
Now, Absalom, said my wife pettishIy,
don't for goodness sake, make q fool of
yourself
And under the force of the words, 10 usc
Western expression, Il caved,' and sat
down again.
Monsieur went at it again. Bangwang-
ti-r--, Bang and there he shot Of just like
mad. His head bobbed up and down ; his
body swayed and bounced his hands flew
UP into the mir and came down with a rush