The Rutland daily globe. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1873-1877, 1874-11-17
Facts and Eancies,
Trade winds-business airs.


A breezy girl-The windass.
One bad thing about gold-Not having
it.
Very few people like what is good for
them.
you cut an acquaintance, are you liable
for ASSAULT
"My Sunday evening mail is what she
calls him in Detroit.
Sweetness is no protection against injus.
tice; even sugar can be crushed,
Public spirit-Readines to do anything
which is likely to prove lucrative.
A wise man keeps his own counsel; con-
sequently has no jobs for strange law
yers.
When a man comes to know that he don't
know everything, he then becomes wise.
What is it that goes up the hill and down
the hill, and yet never moves? The road.
How did the bull lock on emerging from
the china shop? little the worse for the
ware.
Plain English. Lady-Well, boy, and
what are pheasants to-day? Briget specimen
They're birds, ma'am."
The first thing in billiards is to learn to
count. The next thing is to learn how to
count enough to win the game.
There is no rain heavy enough to dampen
the ardor of the local politician, and no
man has seen him when he was not dry.
What is the difference between the digger
Indians and trotting park? One is coarse
race and the other a race course.
An urchin being rebuked for wearing out
his stockings at his toes, replied that it
couldn't be helped; "toes wiggled and heels
didn't.
Serve him light. Wife-what did Jumbo
get for assaulting his wife? Husband-he
was remanded. Wife-Lor'! l should have
thought he would have got three months.
Emphatic Old lady (to telegraph clerk)
20 please, mister, just write me telegram
to my son John, and tell him to come home
directly, and mind and put a dash under
"directly!'
The published lists of presents at FASH
ionable weddings should be carefully pre-
served by the newly married. Some day
they may prove valuable assistants to sher-
IFS in making ont inventories.
A medical man asked his legal adviser
how he could punish servant who had
stolen a canister of valuable snuff. 81 am
not aware of any act" said the lawyer,
"that makes it penal to take snuff"
A man went home the other evening and
found his house locked up. Getting in at
the window with considerable difficulty, he
found on the table a note from his wife
81 have gone out; you will find the door
key on one side the door step
If the old man will insist on taking
smoke after going to bed at night, the
sooner the house is insured for twice its
value the more complacent will be the feel
ings of the relatives who stand by when the
fremen hunt among the ruins for his bones.
A staunch dssenter upon an English
school board declares that she did not
much likeIthem there Ten Commandments
There was smack OF the church catechism
about them" The Church Times tells the
story, and it is good story for churchman
to tell.
When one woman attempts to pass an
other woman going down a church aisle
and rips off that other woman's hanging
| rocket in doing it, even the most cursory
examination of the latter's countenance will
make it plain that the Sabbath in her soul
has fled.
A minister's wife had an impeachment in
her speech. AT ministerial dinnera young
sprig offered the lady some tongue, saying,
every part helps part, you know" "ln-
deed, then let me help you to some brains
holding out dish that stood near a calfs
/ hand