Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1874-07-10
THE UNUERTAfER'S CHAR
tFrom Mark Twsin's Unpublished Eng.i,i,
Notes

From Mark Twsin's Unpublished Eng:i,i,
Notes
. snow, that cOrpsc.o sai.i the Under.
taker, patting the. folded hands of de-
ceased apprOvingly, twas a brick
every way YOU took him he was =
brick. lie was 50 real Accommodating.
and So modest like and simple in his
e. .as. .ssae .@sssMaeaaSs- Tlste9 T 9 mftta, I'd.
l couldn't get it. Thale v,arn't time
anybody could see that. Corpse said
never mind, snake him up some kind
Of a box he could stretch out in com.
Portable, he warn't particular bout tho
general style of it. Said he went moro
on room than style, any way, in a last
final container. Friends wanted y
silver d0,r-plate on the coffin. signify.
ing who he was and whcr' he was
from. Now youknow al fellow couldn't
roust out such gaily thing as that in
little country town like this. What
did the corpse sayi Corpse said
white wash his canoe and dob his ad.
dress and general destination onto it
with backing brush and stencil
plate, long with q verse from somo
likely hymn or other, and Pint him
for the tomb, and mark him 6. q. D.,
and just let him flicker. lie warn't
distressed any moro than You bc-On
contrary just rs calm and collected an
a hearsc horse; said he judged that
wher's he was going to body would
find it considerable better to attracs
attention by picturesque moral char.
acter than natty burial case with q
swell door-pla Oh it. Splendid man
he was. I'd dr,;:hcr do for a corpse
like that n any Eve tackled in seven
year. There's some satisfaction in
buryin' man like that. You feel that
what you're doing is appreciated
Lord bless ycu, SOS he got planted be.
fore he spilled, he was satisfied; said
his relations meant we'll, perfectly
well, but all them preparations was
bound to delay tire thing more or less,
and he didn't wish to be kept layin'
around. You never see such clear
head as what he had--and so cam
and so cool. Just = hunk Of brains.
that is what he was. Perfectly awful.
1t was a ripping distance from one
cad OF that mans head to t'other. OF.
ten and over again he's had brain
fever a-raging in ore place, and the
rest oil the pile didn't know anything
about it-didn't affect it any more
than all Injun insurrection in Arizona.
affects the Atlantic States. Wei, tho
relations they wanted lurid funeral,
but corpse said he was down on fun.
mery-lidn't want any procession
fill the hearsc full Of mourners. and get
out stern line and tow him behind.
He wa: IL, most down on style of any
remains ] ever struck. 4 beautiful
simple minded creaturc-;t was what
he was, you car depend on that. He
was just sst on having things the way
he wanted them, and he took solid
comfort in laying his little plans. He
had me to measure hir. and take whole
raft Of directions; then he had tho
minister stand up behind a long box
with table cloth overit, to represent
the coffin, and read his funeral SER
mon, saying 'Anyc0re, angccrcv at
the good places. and making him
scratch out every bit Of byag about
him, and all the hifalutin; and then
he made them trot out the choir SOS
he could help them pick out the tunes
for the occasion, and he got them to
sing Pop Goes the WEASEL because
he'd always liked that tune when he
was down hearted, and solemn music
made him sad; ana when they sung
that with tears in their eyes (becauso
they all loved him), and his relations
grieving around him, he just laid there
rs happy as bug, and trying to beat
time and showing all over how much
nc enjoyed it; All presently lie cot
worked up and excited, ard tried to
DIN in, for mind you, he was pretty
proud of his abilities in the singing
inc; but the first time he opened his
nonth and was going to spread him.
'elf, bis breath took a walk. Incyer
zee man snufcd ont 30 sudden. All.
t was a great loss-it was q powerful
oss to this poor little one horse town.
Well, well, well. l amt Got time to
70 palarvcring along herc-got to nail
m the lid and lnOsey along with him;
md If you'll just give me a lift we'll
kect him into the hcarsc and mean
Ter along. Relations bound to have
so-lont pay no attention to dying
anetiOns; minute corps'es gone; bnt
l had my way, ii l didn' respect his
asst wishes and tow him behind the
earse Ill he cusscd. consider that
whatever corpse wants done for his
omf0rt Is little enough matter, and
man amt got no right to deceive
i'm or take advantage Of him; and
Ihatever q corpse trusts me to do I'm
ding to do, VET, know, even if it's to
tuff him and paint him yaller and
eep him for keepsake-ysa hear
le!"
He cracked his whip and went
lmbering away with his ancient ruin
hearse and l continued my walk
ith a valuable lesson learned-that
ealthy anG wholesome cheerfulnesa
not necessarily impossible to any
,cupation. The lesson is likely to
, lasting, for it will take many
0nths to 0bliterate the memory OF
10 remarks and circumstances that
,pressed them.
Rousseau used to say, that to write