davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
A Boys Composition.
THE COW.

The COW has littler fun in em than all
other animels rolled into one A COW
wouldn't laugh if she dide, but cows moo
wen they wants their CATS. The milk
we gifts for our te is pull out of cows, and
then pumpt at with a pump til it is
enoughf more. They give chees too,
but weather COW gives more than one
chee to each COW isn't none to the
other.
Cows is lots of hnes, or veryities, like
dogs, and horses, and hens. Some don't
have no horns, and these is noodles wich
can't tos dogs like the one in the house
wich Jack bilt. If l was COW Ide rather
be horse, for horses don't have to be
mil1t.
Once there was feller, and he had
COW wich got burs in her tale, so it was
all tangle, and he went to pick 'em out.
He put his fingers threw the tarsel of the
ole cows tale like cobm, and was
goin to begin Wen the ole COW she got
afrade and begun to wakl away The
feller he couldn't hole her, and he had to
go too, tryne all the time to pull his
fingers out but couldn't for they was cot.
Then he said wo, and he said holt, and
steddy there, and no 'casion to hurry,
and everything he cOudl think of, but
the ole COW she jus KEEP goin' round the
faster and him follerin'. Pretty soon IL
big dog come wich he knew was sab
bage dog, and after lookin' minnit it
jined the percession vile studdin how it
OF to act.
So they KEEP goin and goin' round
the ole COW, and the man, and the dog,
the dog a smeln' the mans CATS and a
maken' up its mine The feller he didn't
kno wether he'd rather have the dog bite
him or bite the COW. But later on n
other man he see 'em, and fecht pail of
slops wich he set down, and wen they
come round to it the ole cow she stopt to
have some, and wen her tale was slack
the mans fingers come loos. Then he
turnd roun to the dog, wich was a settin'
down a grinnin', and he shook his fist
at the dog, and he says, says he, thinlin'
to fool the man that fetch the slops, you
wuthless brute you mus take 'em by the
tales. l never see such a awkward dog
If it's goin to take hah day to teech
you how to drive genteel COW like this
'un lie sell you.
But it was the man that fecht the
slop's dog.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
A Printers Tournament.

A printers tournament, being a con-
test in type-setting, took place in Wash
ington, with the following result. There
We're eight entries in the first class, the
type nonpareil. Time, three hours
The first prize, solid gold compos-
ing stick, won by S. N. Bennerman, who
set 500 ems second prize, solid sill
yer composing stick, full newspaper size,
won by r. A. Mclean, who set 4,99S
ems third prize, Menamin's Encyclo-
p@dia Of Printing, won by W. w. Me
Collum, who set 4, ,720 ems.
Second Class-Time one hour and
thirty minutes-W. w. Malloney was
awarded a silver composing stick, news
paper size, having set 2,27S ems. Frank
A. McGill, German silver composing
stick, full size 2,25O ems. II. W. Hart
man, Harpeps 7ypograph; 2,1S7 ems.
Long Primmer Class-Time one hour
and thirty minutes-J. r. Mcbride was
awarded the first prize, solid gold COM
posing g-stick, breast-pin size, having set
2,12S ems. G. j. S. Hunnicutt, Ameri-
can Encyclopaedia Of Printing; 2,037
ems. H. G. Turleton, a thermometer
1888 ems.
The tournament took place in the
National Republican office. The de.
cisions We're made i'll accordance with
rules previously established, and none
We're present except the judges, referee,
and proof-readers.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
That Peculiar Coroner.

All have heard of the coroner who
seized an Egyptian mummy that was
brought into town, summoned q jury,
held an iniuest ON the mummy, brought
in a verdict of "Death from causes un-
known" and charged the county with
the usual fee, with compound interest
from the time of Moses. Well, that
coroner is still in office, Max Adeler
says, and he is still enthusiastic about
his profession. Last Sunday night he
was at church. The minister preached
a very solemn sermon upon Noah s
flood, and after it was over L met the
coroner in the aisle and said to him
Very impressive discourse, Mr..
Wheeler, wasn't itl'
Beautiful, sir Beautiful" replied
Wheeler. "And yet it seems to be
kinder mournful, too"
" Indeed Why it didn't strike me
in that way. 1t was solemn, of course
but its tendency certainly should be to
fill ths heart of every truly good man
with cheerfulness and hope"
"Oh, know all that" said Wheeler
"but didn't he say there We're several
million people drowned in that flood 2"
believe he did"
"Well, then, say that when I think
of all that mortality, and remember that
l wasn't coroner then, and amt likely to
be when there's another such freshet,
it makes me sick. There amt nothing
cheerful about such reflections. L feel s
if L hadn't been treated right; S if I'd
been robbed"
would like to know how Wheeler
feels when he reads the story of the de-
struction of Sennacherib.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
A Needed Railroad Reform.

The news that the great American
deadhead has driven to despair all the
managers of all the railroads, and com
PEELED them to recognize him as bellig-
erent, is rendered less alarming by the
further information that one great line
has struck a blow at the sleeping-car
monopoly and reduced its rates from 81
for each berth to $1.50. Sleeping and
palace cars are always running and earn
ing money, their life is longer than that
of other rolling stock, and they are al
ways filed to their utmost capacity, so
that there is no earthly reason why their
occupants should be charged at the rate
of 81 night, plus so cents or 81 to the
porter. Great as is their convenience for
the business traveller who desires fully
to economize his time, their expense is a
tax by no means light on his pocket, and
if so desirable reform as reduction
can be brought about and made general
the travelling public, east and west, will
be deeply indebted to the Illinois Cen
trail Company.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Awful for the Man.

The Detroit Free Press is responsible
for the following:
8" Be you on the police force 2" in
quired a dilapidated man, as he entered
the Central Station, recently, and ad-
dressed sergeant. He was informed
that such was the case, when he con
tinued "Im clean tuckered out. It's
that wife of mine. I'm fool-a blasted
old fool, sir I'm fifty, and she's
twenty. She wants to gad about, and /
want to stay at home and if 1 say q
word, it's the teapot, fatiron, or what
ever comes handy I've argued and
scolded, and scolded and fit, and here /
am. Look at this black eye! Look at
me all over, mister police force Once
| was happy; now L am busted. She
wants me to go to every picnic, and ex-
cursion, and festival, and dance, and it's
killing me by inches. Then she wants a
new dress to-day, bonnet tomorrow,
and so ON, and I've got to get 'em, or
have fight. I've stood it all along, but
I'm broken now. See that ere arm
see where she put her teeth in thar this
morning, when 1 would not let her
have money to buy pair of high-heel-
ed shoes. Just lay yer eyes on that air
scar, mister police force"
ITS pretty tough, said the sergeant,
as he looked.
Tough Great heavens it's awful
perfectly awful to bite in that way !''
continued the old man. "But the end
has come. I've got relashuns over
thar who wouldn't see me abused. and
she's welcome to what's in the house.
If any one comes around here sayin'
I've committed suicide or disappeared,
Just tell 'em how it is, mister police
force-tell 'em l suffered and suffered,
until 1 had to leave her to die. Tell
everybody to beware of her; she looks
nice, but she's varago, hippercrit-a
regular yaller fox, behind the currant
bushes I"
The sergeant promised, and the old
man rolled down his sleeves and prr-
sued his journey towards the ferry.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Something About Earthquakes.

Though far away from volcanoes, and
in the sober temperate zone, New York
and her neighborhood is not wholly de-
prived of the peculiar sensation by which
an earthquake demonstrates the lack of
absolute stability even in real estate
That locality can boast of no houses
thrown down OF cities destroyed by
terrestrial tremor, but her history has
yet its positive record of several shakes
within the period since the acquisition
of California. 1t might be suggested
that we had taken her tendency to up
heaval when we conquered onr entire
Republic of Mexico, and that we did not
entirely surrender that when the forces
of General Scott left her scorching
plains. More likely, however, earth
quakes have happened here before the
era of the Shaw press and the lightning
telegraph. A shock was, felt in New
York city on the Sth of September, 1S4S,
which, though distinct, did no further
damage than to crack few walls and
nauseate some sickly stomachs. North
ern New York felt a little quake on the
18th of March, 1853. At Buffalo and
some other places shock was felt Oc-
tober %, 1857. New England was
shaken in quite lively manner October
%, 1869 On Saturday evening, June
25, 1870, after mild day, the thermome-
tor rose suddenly. Presently a low
rumbling noise was heard, like heavy
distant blast houses trembled and win
dows ratified in the eastern part of New
York city, belowF ourteenth street. Peo-
pie thought gas house had blown up or
some such accident had occurred. 1t
was genuine earthquake, though in
very confined space. Next morning,
about seven o'clock, similar shock was
felt in Brooklyn. The whole region
from Cleveland to New York, Montreal
and Bangor was quite thoroughly shaken
October 20, 1870. The tremor seemed
to progress from south to north, accord
ing to the majority of the reports, though
some observers thought it had it's motion
in the opposite direction. In New York
furniture was upset by the shock and
solid brick buildings tottered as though
they might fall. Long and Staten Islands
and New Jersey had similar experience.
On the 10Th of June, 1871, the farmers
heard the sound as of heavy trains of
wagons driven rapidly over cobble pave
ment, and their houses were violently
shaken, i'll some places breaking china
and glass ware. Westchester, Long
Island, Connecticut and Maine had an
other shake, with a northward current,
July II, 1872 So late as November 25,
Essex county, Massachusetts, had its
shake, perhaps the response of mother
earth to the late political convulsion.
The late earthquake shock on the Hud-
son calls to the mind of a New York
paper the above incidents.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
RIDGwAY, COUNTY, PA, THURSDAY,

fore other words of greeting were ex-
changed; u' very weak yet, so you must
meet her as calmly as you can"
Then, as the two drove across the
city, Uncle Montague told Walter of
Susy's legacy, her present, and her good
resolutions.
"She is the dearest little woman in
the world" the old man said, "and
you must make her happy now. There
is good woman in the house now to
keep it in order till Susy is well. Then,
Walter, let her have the care herself.
Even if her inexperience brings some
temporary discomforts, love will soon
teach her how to remedy defects, and
she will find her happiness where true
women seek for it ever, at home God
help those who have no such heaven of
rest"
The carriage stopped before the pretty
stone house, but Walter scarcely saw
the cheerful halls as he sprang up the
stairs to Susy's room. Once there, he
remembered his uncle's caution and,
opening the door softly, he went in with
quiet step. A very weak but very
glad voice spoke his name, aud he bent
over the pale face on the pillow, his voice
low and tender, murmuring loving
words.
"Our boy" Snsy whispered. 81
meant to tell you the day you went
away"
"What brute l was Can you for
give me, Susy 2"
Hush, love; it is 1 who should ask
forgiveness. But you will not go again,
Walter"
"Never ! The wee darling She him
curl his fingers round mine. How old
is he, Susy!'
CA week old tomorrow. Walter let
me call him Montague"
81 should have asked it.
So through sorrow and separation
Walter and Susy found the road to hap
piness, and it would be hard to find a
cozier home, more gentle, loving wife,
or sturdier boy than greet Walter
Hope every evening when he returns
from his days business. He colored
with deep pain when Susy put into his
hands every draft he had sent to her I'M
cashed, but he has invested them for
the use of Montague Hope, Jr.,
while Susy wonders if ever again fine
clothes or jewelry can tempt her to speak
a cross word to Walter.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Resources of Alaska.

Alaska promises to be profitable bar
gain after ALL 200 miles down the coast
is Kodiac I5land, where immense pas
lures stretch out on every hand, air
balmly, and temperature even all the
year. The bay swarms with Goldfish and
the brooks and small lakes with trout
and salmon. Game is abundant and
ducks and geese SO plentiful that they
can be killed with a club. Wild elk are
plentiful on the main land, and several
fur agencies established on the island
have profitable trade in bear, fox, otter
and white ermine skins. Two tribes of
Indians occupy the island-the Aleuts,
who show mixture of Russivn blood,
and the Koyuks, who possess all the
traits of the genuine North American
Indians. The former are thrifty and in
telligent and seem pleased with the
idea of civilized settlement. The Ice
landers found true Arcadia in this
region which has been regarded both in
hospitable and uninhabitable. 1t is not
unlikely that the Icelandic race, after a
thousand years of hardship and suffer
ing upon a cold and barren island, will
choose this new territory as their future
home
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
What is Thy Name a!

1t is often the case that persons who
write ON the whole legible hand sign
their name so carelessly that stranger
can scarcely make out what it is. Our
editorial experience has given indubita-
BILE evidence of this. Any of our read
ers who may have fallen into such habit
would do well to learn a lesson from the
anecdote told of Rev. w. S. Potts, DID,:
When clerk in Philadelphia, he took
bill to Quaker, and had signed the
receipt with one of those hieroglyphic
cartouches, sometimes seen ON bank notes
now. The Quaker, taking up the paper,
said, blandly :
Friend, what is this at the bottom 2"
"That, sir, is my name."
"What is thy name ''
civilian s. Potts"
"Well, William, will thee" please to
write it down under here plainly, so that
a witness in court could know il"
Ever after DIR. Potts wrote and lived
30 that no man could mistake word on
letter.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
VOL. ~.
The Old Farmhouse.

At the foot of the hill, near the old red MILL
In quiet, shady spot,
Just peeping through, half hid from view,
Stands little moss-grown cot.
And straying through at the open door,
The sunbeams play on the sanded floor
The easy chair, all patched with care,
Is placed by the old hearth-stone
with witching grace, in the old fireplace,
The evergreens are strewn.
And pictures hang ON the whitened wall
And the old clock ticks in the cottage hall.
More lovely STILL on the window-sil
The dew-eyed flowers rest
While midst the leaves OH the moss-grown
The martin builds her nest.
And all day long the summer breeze
whispering love to the bended trees.
Over the door, all covered DER
With a sack OF. dark green baize,
Lays a musket old, whose worth is told
In the events of other days
And he powder-flask, and the hunters horn,
Have hung beside it for many morn.
For ears have fled with noiseless tread
Like fairy dreams away,
And left in their flight, all shom of his might.
A father--old and gray;
And the soft wind plays with his snow-white
hair.
And the old man sleeps i'll his easy-chair.
Inside the door, OH the sanded floor
Light, airy footsteps glide,
And maiden fair, with faxen hair
kneels by The old mans side
An old oak srecked by the angry storm,
While the ivy clings to its trembling form.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Tie Jockeys Race.

San Francisco has this year been Civ
ing the same experience that every To-
cality does every year, where horse rae
ing exists. a paper gives Il detail of
how the thing is done: Two Jockeys
put their small heads together and lay
out a campaign. Here is horse that
has no fast record, but is good second
to Goldsmith Maid. His want of a
record permits him to be beaten without
exciting suspicion, thus reviving Cali
fornia enthusiasm on their favorite horse.
One jockey takes charge of Occideut, the
other of Fullerton Occident wins the
first race, and up go the California hats.
behaves badly and Fullerton wins, MAX
ing very extraordinary time. A week
later the horses are brought together
again. This time Occident behaves
splendidly, and Fullerton is the one that
cannot be managed. Occident wins to
sullIy, only one heat being in less time
than Fullerton made to wagon the week
before. Everybody feels glad that the
gallant little brown horse won the race,
but few have more confidence in his
ability to beat Fullerton than when they
went on the ground. The race had every
appearance of being sold. 1t does not
follow that the owners of Fullerton and
Occident had anything to do with buy
ing and selling. Probably they had not.
Owners are not usually consulted by
jockeys in these little matters. They
arrange that among themselves. The
thing the public has to consider is, if it
is worth while tobe victimized year after
year by jockeys for the sake of Witness
ing trotting race that is probably de-
cided before either horse goes on the
track"
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
TRANSMISSION of Blood.

A highly interesting and delicate sur
gical operation was performed in Bing-
hamton, N. Y, the Times says, by DIR.
J. G.. Orton, upon Marcellus A. Hayes,
aged twenty-eight years, who had been
suffering from disease of the lungs dur
ing the past four years, and had become
much emaciated and enfeebled. The op-
Grafton known as the direct TRANSMISSION
of blood from a healthy animal to the
human subject having been agreed upon,
DIR. Orton prepared an apparatus which,
though simple in its construction, was
safety to the patient, and facility in the
execution of the delicate operation. A
healthy six months lamb, having been
securely inclosed in sack, was placed
upon table by the side of the patients
bed, and the cartoid artery exposed for
about two and half inches, and iga-
ture applied to this, arresting the blood
current. About two inches below this q
strong pair of forceps were applied,
which securely compressed the artery. A
small opening was then made in the sec
ton of the vessel thus secured, and q
small glass tube of about one-eighth of
an inch bore, three inches long, slightly
bent, was inserted, and the artery care
fully tied to it by strong silk igature.
To the other end of the glass tube was
attached some twelve inches of elastic
tubing, to the other extremity of which
was secured another glass tube, similar
to the one just described.
The vein usually opened III venesec-
ton at the elbow was now exposed by
dissection for about one inch, and q
compress and bandage applied around
the arm below the incision. 4 small
opening was made in the vein exposed,
and funnel-shaped glass tube inserted
into it and the vein secured to it by a
ligature. This funnel-shaped tube thus
arranged was filled with weak solution
of soda in water at the temperature of SO
degrees.
In order to determine the amount of
blood to be transfuseds the blood from
the lamb was allowed to flow through
the tube into graduated glass, four
seconds being required to obtain an
ounce of blood
Everything being now ready, the for
ceps upon the lambs artery were relax
ed, and after all air was removed from
the tubes and the blood flowed briskly,
the fore end OF the glass tube was insert
ed into the one connected with the vein
of the patients arm, and Immediately
the pure blood of the lamb coursed
freely into the system of the sick man.
By timing the flow it was estimated that
eight ounces of blood We're thus intro
duced.
The patient experienced at the termi-
nation of the operation peculiar
warmth over the whole body, and SEN
sation of fullness this was succeeded by
a slight chill, and this was soon followed
by decided reaction, his pulse becom-
ing full and slightly accelerated. Dur
ing the remainder of the day and up to
last reports, the patient continued to
feel very comfortable, and is encouraged
to think that he will derive permanent
benefit from this novel operation to
which he had voluntarily submitted him
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Decisions in Grange Law.

l. No subordinate grange can sub
scribe stock to a joint stock company
and afterwards assess its members for the
purpose of paying the same but can
subscribe to the extent of its funds on
hand in the treasury.
2. There is no distinction between a
dimit card and a withdrawal card-a
party holding a dimit is amenable to any
subordinate grange in whose jurisdiction
found.
8. Past Masters and their wives who
are matrons may be tried in the subordi-
nate grange to which they belong, or in
whose jurisdiction found.
4. Applications for dimit should be
voted on by the grange, and majority
vote gives consent under the constitu-
ton.
5. Trading cards must be surrendered
on application for dimit.
6. Dues can only be remitted to those
who are unable to pay.
The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1874-12-31
Five Children Drowned.

A disaster so narrowing and unpre-
cedented as to shock every sensitive heart
occurred near Preakness, N. j., about
four miles beyond Paterson. The small
pond there was covered with sheet of
ice about an inch thick, and five children
of Mr.. John Dotterich, the proprietor of
large dairy establishment, ventured
upon it with sleigh. They were four
girls, aged respectively sixteen, fifteen,
thirteen and eight years, and boy, six
years old, all healthy and blooming chill
dren, petted and beloved by their par
ents and relatives, and who, in their gay,
rollicking mirth on the ice, little thought
of the awful fate that awaited them. The
pond was within sight of their home, and
their mother was lovingly looking at
their innocent sport when, at spot near
the center of the pond, the.ice gave way,
and children and sleigh were plunged
into the water. They struggled des-
perately for their lives, but their heart
rending shrieks were of no avail, and
they were in few minutes buried in the
icy water. The eldest child, bright
girl of sixteen, gave last agonizing cry
of "Oh, mother, save me !" as she dis
appeared from her mothers sight Three
of the children had been in the sleigh,
and the other two were pushing from
behind, but it seems that they all met
the same cruel fate. Boats were got
ready and all possible efforts We're made
to save them, but i'll vain, and for several
hours none of the bodies could even be
recovered. The agony of the mother, rs
she saw her children engulfed in the icy
pond beyond all human aid, may well be
imagined. The neighborhood was in a
feverish state of excitement, and the
most intense sympathy for the afflicted
family is felt everywhere.