The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1874-01-23
A STEAM JACKASS.
AN INGENIOUS INVENTION, AND ITS Sue
CESSFUL TRIAL.

A man living near Nashville, Washing
ton comfy, H., has recently invented an
a,,naratus to take the place of whistles for
railroad signals, steamboats,, tre-alarmS,
factory calls and the like. He calls it the
..Telepbon," but the popular name is the
.ssteam-iackass." The inventor is a stock
farmer, and has devoted much OF his time
TO raising mules, whose habits and anato-
NV he appears to have studied carefully.
on his farm there was a mule of more than
ordinary vocal power, whose voice could
he heard distance of four miles in every
direction. when he once got warmed up to
his work The owner computed that II he
could set in motion all the air in circle
of eiobt miles in diameter, or twenty-five
miles in circumference, or an area of fifty
snuare miles, OF thirty-two thousand acres,
a hundred horsepower jackass could, all
other things being equal, rival any other
noise vet discovered. He established the
fact that the power of an ordinary ass Is
about one-twelfth of an Indicated steam
power a steam engine of one thousand
horsepower would be equal to the power
of 12.0OO ordinary asses. Wherefore, if
one ass can fill circle eight miles in di-
ameter, r. 900 iackasscs or 4 l, 600 horse
power iackass would fill a circle of 90, 900
miles III diameter.
The inventor thought all this over care
fully, arrived at the deduction that If he
could take natures vocal apparatus and
apply it TO a greater power, he could pro-
duce larger and more satisfactory vol
ume of sound. Filled with this idea, he
put the mule 10 death, and carefully sew
cred the head from the body. He then in
iected solutions of chloride of zinc and ar
senic into the veins and arteries of the
head and neck. to prevent decay OF the
flesh. India-Iubber was dissolved in sui
phuric ether and the solution forced thro'
the trachea or wind pipe and through the
larynx OF throat. The ether evaporated,
leaving film of rubber on the membranes,
and the injection and evaporation were
continued until the rubber film was found
of sufficient thickness. These organs were
then subjected to a Yapor Of sulphur, heat
ed TO 300 degrees, by which process the
Rubber was vulcanized, its elacticity in
creased, and the membranes rendered i'm
pervious to steam. These preparations
completed, a short piece of rubber hose
was attached to the windpipe and connect
ed with steam boiler.
1t was moment of agony to the invent
or, as he placed the ass head in the hands
OF an assistant, and slowly pulled the valve
open; moment of thrilling interest. As
the steam was turned on, it passed into the
wind-pipe, expelling the air and producing
sigh, followed by groan, snort, a
chuczling, then violent coughing aud
turned on, the most fearful noise, the
most frightful gutfaw, the most vociferous
bray that ever assailed mortal ears were
produced. The lips contracted, disclosing
a terrible array of teeth the features de-
VelOped a satanic grin the jaws raised and
fell, as the steam crowded the passages,
and the ears participated in the general
movement, giving TO the head of the ass
an animated and excited appearance. The
man who WAS holding the head gazed upon
it a moment, with dilated eyes, colorless
checks, knocking knees and protrudtng
tongue; then, suddenly losing ali interest
in the performance, he emigrated. As
for the inventor, his success exceeded his
most sauguine anticipations. For an in
slant he contemplated the head, his cOun-
tenance working with every manifestation
of intense delight; then he too started,
probably to learn the greatest distance to
which that voice would penetrate, leaving
it still in operation, with all steam on.
The head had now got fully warmed up to
lis work, and that bray went hunting
through the universe. 1t was an acoustic
earthquake sky-shake it was a storm.
a hurricane of sound, a tornado, 4 cyclone
of noise it was donkey carnival, jack
ass Fourth of July. 1t was the greatest
success the world has ever known.-.St.
LOGiS Globe.