The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1874-09-19
NUMBER 2.
Laughing Gas.

be done.
Self-made men are very apt to wor-
ship their maker.
The hardest things to deal within
old pack of cards.
Nothing comes home to q man 80
much as al unsettled bill.
If you see q policeman aim at q
dog. try to get near the dog.
No unfortunate trader looks 30
down III tho mouth as dentist.
The highest compliment to q bar
ber-He dyed and made no sign.
Gravity is no more evidence Of
wisdom than paper collar il of q
shirt.
Those who have tried it say that
kissing is like a sewing machine, be-
cause it seems good.
Fred, how is your sweetheart 2"
"Pretty well, | guess; s1le says
needn't call any more"
Bayard Taylor intimates that l,e
found a deal to interest him in the
FarOe Islands.
They now say that BozaGris didn't
+" cheer his band" at al but hid il, q
cornfeld at the beginning Of the fight.
They have minister in Mound
City, Kansas, who attracts people 10
his prayer meetings by the music OF q
brass band.
A man in San Francisee recently
wrote letter to another, asking hi,a
for his wife, without so much a. ell
closing postage stamp.
A young man in Frisco embexzlcd
a diamond to pay his tailor bill. Tail
ors are at liberty to cut this out and
send it to their customers.
A Pennsylvania baby is said to
have inherited the eyes and nose If
his father, but the cheek of his uncle.
who is an insurance agent.
Teacher" Peter, you are sucl, 4
bad boy that you are not fit 70 sit in
the company Of good boys on the
bench. Come up here and sit By D,e.
sir"
An Alabama editor winds up m ed
itoriaf on the corn crop with the re-
mark, We have on exhibition in our
sanctum pair of magnificent ears."
The reason why Sylvanus Cobb, Jr.,
confines himself to writing for the
periodicals is because the legitimate
function of a Cobb is to produce q
cereal.
Barnum has written to Chicago for
a newspaper man reported to have
lost $4,000. He would like to have
him in q museum.
A person was boasting that he vas
from a high family. = s'Yes," said a
bystander, s. have seen some of the
family so high that their feet could
not touch the ground"
A Western Postmaster writes to the
Postmaster General that "hen will l4,
full of country Postmasters Eefore
long if they do not get more pay than
is allowed this Office"
A Kansas farmer solemnly declares
that grasshopper sat on the gate
post and threateningly asked: "Wl-
liam Bryant, where in thunder il the
balance of that cold lueat ~
There's a $40, 900 South jersey heir
ess who has SO many lovers sitting on
the fence, waiting for her to come out
nights, THAI she has giSea her entire
fortune to endow = lunatie asy!am.
ave got EN-" shouted . Nissis-
sippi boatman recently, when first tbe
comet broke upon his vision. "Pye
had snakes before, and nov the stars
have got tails on 'em. I'm dead
man,
Progression Is the watchword of the
hour, hut in Missouri mothers haul
their disobedient children over the
knee and strike on the same old spot
that the Romans did three thousand
years ago.
> Small, ragged, barefoot boy to GAL
lus colored gent with a valise :" Say
boss. shall / carry your satc',el for
you ~ Colored gent to small boy
4" No, go way dare! Use gittin' two
bits for carryin' dis down myself"
A Kentucky church has ant tive
lady missionaries to the Fejee ssdaD,ls.
This is very eonsiderate. No doubt
the cannibals will prefer this soIs to
the tongh old gentlemen who lare
usually thrust upon that marked.
Wonen dress "to please the men,"
DO they! Why, if the whole male
genus were extinct, itwouldn't make
a feather or furbeiow difference in the
get-up Of the dear creatures 50 long
as there wssa living chance of spiting
some other woman.
Beacon Gandam flourisl,es in Lock
Haven, n. Y. When the minister de-
sires a collection taken up for the lit
tie heather on India's coral strand,
and says, Deacon Gaudam, you pass
the hat he has to be careful how he
places bis commas
Here is a description of a mean
IL, II hot hon