The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1874-08-18
A Bashrul Mans Experience.

A NbA1tblE JOHNbON 10 a flrst rate tel-
~ low, only he's terribly bashful. He
called to see Miss Jones one night. He
never would have been guilty Of such an
act, had she not met him coming out of
church-cornered him right up by the steps
where all the girls could see him-and
made him promise to come round the next
night-before she's let him go. SO the
following evening Charlie aTayed himself
like lilly of the field, and started for the
Jones'. This happened last winter. He
got there about eight o'clock. 1t was quite
dark. Charlie mounted the steps rang
the bell and then-his courage failed him.
He cleared the six steps at one leap and
fled down the street. Bridget went to the
door. Nobody there. Old Jones hailed
Bridget and asked her who rung the bell.
Sure it's some Of them lads that do be
ringing the bell every night, and thin run
away-bad luck to them, at arl at arl p
'Once more to the breach, dear friends,
was the soliloquy Of Charlie, as he slowly
retraced his steps. Withglad and gallant
tread did he re-ascend the front stoop and
blithely pulled the bell. But nimbly did
he again descend the steps and swiftly dis
appear up the street, reaching the quarter
post in less time than forty seconds.
Bridget at the door same result as be-
fore. Bridget waxed wroth. And old
Jones vowed he'd fix that Internal whelp {;
so he got piece Of stout broom cord tied
one end Of it to the iron railing ON the
further side Of the steps, about a foot high
er than the top step, then passed it through
a hole in the fligree work on the other side
of the steps at the same height brought
the end of the string through the blind of
the ay-window, thence into the parlor {;
afterwards he went out and slackened the
string so as to have it lay fiat along the
step where nobody would notice it in COM
ing up-but where, if it were frightened
from within the house, after one had gone
up the step, one would be somewhat apt 70
notice it in going down, especially if one
were in hurry. Then Mr.. Jones sat down
in the parlor; grasped the end of the string
and waited for the bell to ring. Bridget
not aware that the old gent had set a trap,
had little something fixed up herself
She repaired to the kitchen, to the boiling
tea-kettle from the range, meandered up
stairs with it, sat down by window right
over the front door, and waited also for the
bell to ring.
The bell did ring.
The old man pulled the string-Bridget
emptied the kettle--and Charlie-well, il
didn't hurt Charlie much. That is to say
he was able in couple of weeks to sit up
and have his bed made and inside of a
month he could get around very nicely on q
pair of crutches. To be sure six of his
teeth were never found, and his left cheek
looked as if he had run knot-hole into it
But he didn't mind such little thing al
, that. Still, he never seemed to care to &c
down to Jones' after that, as o sort of cold
ness, as it were, had sprung up between
them.
Nowadays when Charlie wishes to ex
perience the ecstatic delight Of call OF
, Miss Jones, he goes out and lays down il
front of his house and let's hack run ove
him /; it's just as much fun and not near Sc
far to go. He thinks that by the time III
can let full grown omnibus drive over thu
bridge of his nose, without making hin
wink, he'll be able to stand another whirl
down at the Jones' house.