Ashtabula telegraph. (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1874-1880, 1874-06-27
QUE NEW YoRKLErrER.
The NeaOest Dodge-FasbioR and Honey
-Dogs-Death from Hydrot05ia-Tte
StrSbers-TRe Weather.
THE CoAfAIoN DODGE NOW.

1unKhannock, Ia, be walking down
Broadway to morrow, Mr.. Smith
would very likely be met by bland
gentleman who would advance with
extended hand and say "Why Jones
how are you, and how are all the
folks in Jericho?"
Mr.. Smith would reply, "you are
mistaken my dear sir, my name is
not Jones, nor do 1 live in Jericho;
I am Mr.. Smith aud 1 live in Tunk-
hammock"
excuse me- would the bland
stranger reply; 81 was mistaken"
Mr.. Smith would walk one more
block and would be accosted by an
other bland stranger who would say
GLOW are you Smith, and how are
all the folks in TunkhannOck."
And then the bland stranger
would go on saying that he lived in
Iunkhannock some five years ago;
that he went there to go into bust
ness but did not make the trifie, and
left; but that he met Smith once or
twice and recognized him.
"Will you take something" saws
the stranger; which Smith, being
jolly good fellow and glad to meet
any one who ever saw Tunkhannock,
does with alacrity.
Two or three drinks are taken and
Mr.. Smith being sufficiently primed,
starts out with his friend. Getting
down into Nassau street the friend
remembers that he has drawn
prize in lottery and will just step
up and get it cashed. Will Nj.
Smith step up? Mr.. Smith does step
up, and Mr.. Smith steps into a room
with sign "Jones & Co., Bankers"
and Mr.. Smiths friend is greeted by
a benevolent old gentleman in spec
tacles who takes his ticket and pays
him $275, less commissions, and con-
graduates him on his good luck
Then the benevolent old man says
to Mr.. Smiths friend, that a new
style of lottery has been devised
which is just the same as any
other lottery, only it is played with
dice. You put down, S. and if you
throw certain combinations you take
$500. Mr.. Smiths friend tried it
and won $500, which was paid him
very willingly by the benevolent old
gentleman who semed to stand there
to pay out money. Then Mr.. Smith
tries it. He pays out S. but only
wins $25. He tries again and loses,
but as he is left $40 ahead he laughs
and goes in again. This time he
loses, when new combination is ex-
planned to him, which by venturing
$500 can hardly fail to make 5000.
Mr.. Smiths friend is so certain of it
that he proposes to ''go $3.50 of it
himself, and Mr.. Smith is satisfied
and he puts up the $3.50 with him
This time he loses-he has struck
that internal ugly chance, and as he
does not. want to play more the game
is closed. y
AS Mr.. Smiths friend disappears
the moment he strikes the street, Mr..
Smith gradually awakens to the fact
that he has been taken in and done
for to the tune of $3.50, by a most
shallow device, an impOsture so thin
that a baby should have seen through
it. He rushes back to demand his
money, of the benevolent old gen
tleman, but alas, the "ofice, 'ais clos
ed, and the nice old party is gone
from his gaze like a beautiful
dream.
Occasionally the sharpers get
shraped. A New Jersyman was
picked up in this way the other day
aud they allowed him to wia s25.
The moment the money was paid
him he politely. bid them "Goed
morning. and STARTED to leave; his
friend .placed himself against the
door and insisted that he should not
90 till the ''house" had achance to
get even. But he did go. a revol-
yer pointed at the friends head was
persuader that was potent.
FASHION AND MONEY.
There is one class in New York
who heroically refuse to recognize
''hard times" namely the fashiona-
BILE woman. No matter what hap
pens, the woman of fashion must
maintain her position so long as. she
holds any place at all. When she
cannot do this she goes out alto
gether; that is, when she dies, she
dies all over. Let one of these
see a woman in the same circle H1th
more exquisite laces or more gor-
geous diamonds and forthwith to
Tiffany's or Stewarts goes she, ana
selects the costliest, remarking IN a
majestic way, "Send the bill to my
husband" The bill is sent, and the
husband, poor fellow, pays it. 1t
NAV ruin him; he may want the
monevi in his business to keep it afOat
in these cruel times; but that mat
ters not. The gorgeous gem of a
woman must have a gorgeous set
ing, and settings must be paid for
But some of them do make fight
to keep up appearances without
great cost. They spend 81, 900 on