Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1874-09-14
The prettiest girls afoat-those

The prettiest girls afoat-those in
swimming.
Goldsmith Maid was shod IN Spring
field the other day, and the nails from
her old shoes were carefully preserved
for watch charms by those who happened
to be present on the occasion
Of course, one IN the country sees,
among other things, ''barefooted maidens
tripping Ger the dewey grass, but then
most Of them have sore heels, and the
romance fades away like q washing left
out over night
A generous West Troy boatman offers
to name i bran new canal boat after any
man who will agree to marry his daugh-
ter, comely maiden Of thirty-two years.
What chance for some young man who
has the courage to brave the storms Of
the 'raging canawl-"
Iceland, having had It's m1IIennial,
viii freeze up again for another thousand
years, and the world VIII rarely be re-
minded Of Its x1stence-unless, indeed,
1t should become fashionable cosmopol-
Itan summer watering place. And why
should it not2 What could be more at
tracti7e in hot weather than the prospect
of a trip to Iceland
A case Of terrible cruelty to children
has come to light in New Orleans. A
woman named ZeigIer has been in the
habit Of beating her step-chIdren until
they have become idiots They were
confined for days at time IN cellar
overrun with vermin, where rats would
guaw at their toes They we're held
under streams Of cold water, and whip.
ped while blood dripped from their ez
! tremities- The object seems to haEt
! been to kill them, but the result wa.
! only to reduce them to idocy. There
) ought to be law with severe penalties
for any man who viii make mothers-in
J law
3 Everybody III Paraguay smokes. ano
3 every female above the age Of l3 ehews
) | am wrong; they don't chew, but pu
, tobacco IN their mouths and keep It ther
. constantly, except when eating, and, IN
: stead Of chewing, roll It about and sue
. it. Only imagine yourself about to sa
3 lutte the red lips Of magnificent lIttl
o Hebe, arrayed IN satin and flashing wit
3 diamonds, as she puts you back with on
Q delicate hand, while with the ether Sd
8 draws forth from her mouth brownis
o black roll Of tobacco quite two Inche
long, looking like a monster grub, an
= then, depositing the savory Iozenge Q
the brim Of your somhreros puts I'D he
face and Is ready for salute Howe
y er, one soon gets used to this IN Par;
, quay. where you are, perforee Of custom
obliged to kiss every lady you are intrr
' d1ced TO.
Recently at a funeral IN one Of Il
. cities of New Hampshire the of1eia5Ir
clergyman commenced his remarks
q saying: Il was not acquainted WI
m the deceased and therefore hardly kno
what to say Gu this occasion" I
paused. when presently one Of q
mourners, who had evidently been drow
u ing his sorrow IN the flowing bowl, .
" preached him and placing his hal
" Familiarity On his shoulder said. aWh
n old feIIer (hic}, don't you know Wills
He's (hic] one Of the feIlers (hie)r
was Low me to intro (hicl duee Fe--
Willis" said ths drunken man. addres
ing the corpse, ..this Is Mr.. Brown y
Brown (hiey. this Is Willis Willis. 7
boy, Mr. Browns (hicy come to prea
rs. yer funeral (hie) sermon The drum
en- man was hustled cut and the funel
proceeded. d.-sJow7zdk