The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1874-05-13
:2hatk, pl,,s ana Chimney,

,,us+ exercise them if you wish
to keep them in working order'-l''
Adams. ,-,,..
~ Dubuque man has asked the
courts to protect him against three
widows who are trying to force INN
into marriage.
What is the difference between q
formcr and bottle Of whislley! Ohe
husbands the corn and the other 7
rorns the husband
in life it is difficult to say VINO
do YOU the, most mischiel-enemies
with the worst intentions, or friends
with the best. L
-Cobbett's wife caught him by
the grace with which she used her
wash tub. She never was known to
use it after the wedding.
Grace is modest girl and re-
fuses to wear low dresses. ''Ala.
she remarks to her maternal, that is
more than I can bare"
A question of precedence is now
troubling Cincinnati. The trouble
is, whether an alderman's wife ranks
biober than the wife of the county
recorder.
WHAT'S the difference between
the side of right-angle triangle and
nm old maids teapot? One is ny
pothenuse, and the other is a teapot
in use.
Almost every one will be sur
nrised to learn that $1,000 were col
Iected at the Washington monument
last year. 1t pays the salary OF the
associations treasurer.
-Tongatobo, in the Sandwich Is
lands, has been cultivating yam
twelve years, and now it is ripe and
weighs ton. A clear case OF vege-
table imitation,
-"sDid YOU execute this instru,
mcnt without fear or compnlsion
from your husband?" blandly asked
the Judge. "Fear! CompuIsion! Tie
compel me. You don't know me
Judge"
In q natural state, tears anf
laughter go hand in hand; for the
orc twin.born. Like two chiidrei
sleeping in one cradle, when one stir
and wakes, the other wakes alst
- Beecher.
i have often wondered how eve
re man loves himself more than a
the rest of men, yet sets less vallI
on his own opinion Of himself tina
on the opinion Of others AppoIi'
dorus.
Don't You mean to marry aga!
nv dear sir?" said bnxom wldo
to her neighbor mo, my de-
widow" said the old rusty. 'l
rather lose all the ribs I've got, tn;
take another"
well, Bridget, if I engage 20
shall want you to stay at hor
whenever | shall wish to 60 out
"Wen, ma'am, l have no objection
providing you do the same Wher
wish to 60 OUT
"A model husband from the la
Of fiction. ale admired his wife
much that he used to light the cs
dlethreo times every night to 10
at her; and he became very &C
bratel bankrupt two Or three times
Life is made up, not OF gr'
sacrifices or duties, but of lit
things, in which smiles and kindn
and small obligations given habi
ally are what win and preserve
heart and secure comfort Sir
Dayy.
1t makes us prond when our IL
of mistress is returned; it ough1
make us prouler still when we
love her for herself alone, with
the aid of any such selfish ref
ton. This is the religion OF Il
: Hazlitt.
-Webster's dictionary cont;
over fifty thousand words. 30
says when he camc home late
other night, in the space OF tilt
minutes his wife applied them al
him, including some extra ones
the fire shovel.
"A wrangling couple were dis
sing the subject of epitaphs
tomb-stones, and the husband S
MY dear, what kind of sion
you suppose they will give me V
die?" birthstone, my love-"
her reply.
"A Delaware man has been
inc cod liver oil for four yea
cure the consumption, and has
found out that he never had any