The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1874-07-16
The Fate of a Keg OF Beer.

The Hamilton College bows, in Clinton,
Y. Y. were celebrating the Fourth of July
a few summers ago. They had lighted
large bonfire on the backgrounds, for the
magnitude of which they were largely in
debted to the fence-rails of the neighbor-
ing farmers, and while the cOnfiagratlOn
was at its height. four of The boys started
for the beer. without which no celebration
was ever known to be complete. Now, the
keg of this necessary liquid, which had
been smuggled on the grounds in the dead
of the preceding night, was stored directly
over Prof Chester's room, and the edict
had gone forth that if any of the noble fac
ultv found beer or any other stimulating
eve opene- on the premises, they should
cOnfiScate the same in hurry. How,
therefore. to fetch the beer down the stairs
without i'rOf. Chester nabbing them was
the leading question. But the great and
glorious recOllectiOns of their torefathers
fight for liberty encouraged the boys To
struggle for their beer, and after it they
went.
The keg was rolled from its hiling-place,
and was being silently taken down the
stairs when the professors door suddenly
flew open, and in a twinkling he was on
them. 1t was a fair catch. The boys
dropped the keg and fled, and the profess
sOr quietly rolled it into his room. and the
door was again shut. hen followed
council of war. The beer had been pur-
chased under the auspices of the Fresh
man class, and the SOphOmOres had no
sooner learned of the seizure than they
filled the air with taunts. The Fresh
men deliberated, and at length COM
mittee of three raped at the professor
door.
'sSee here, professor" said the spOkes-
man. you have been a college boy, and
YOU know that unless something is done
this class of ours won't hear the last of
this beer business for three years. Now,
we don't care a snap for the beer, but we
don't like to have it taken away from us.
It's burn on the class. Let's compromise.
You roll out the keg, and We'll put it
up on the window-sill, knock out the
bung, and let it all run out on the ground.
Then YOU can inform Prex Brown that you
prevented us from drinking it, and we
can tell the SophOmOres that we got it
back from you, and did what we pleased
with it.
Eyes" said the second checklist man in
the class, ''we'll let every drop run out on
the ground"
The professor thought bit, and then he
quietly pointed at the keg.
Let Ille see Ile DctT run OuIs lit sstiu.
In jiffy the boys had it on the window
sill. The bung was taken out, and the
foaming liquid spurted with a graceful
curve into the darkness below and was
heard sputtering and gurgling as it struck
on something. The boys did not move a
muscle. The professor looked triumph
ant. The SOphOmOres suddenly ceased
their shouts of derisiOn. and began to
whistle Tommy Dodd." The beer
flowed on out into the darkness, and then
all was silent.
Just before the last drops were flowing
out the boys thanked the professor very
affectiOnately, and the sarcastic tone of
the last speaker led the man of letters to
prick up his ears. By that time, however,
the last drop had passed through the
bung-hole and a long, loud shout rose
| from under the window. The boys who
had kindly held the keg vanished, and in
another minute hundred unfledged col
legians were dancing about the fire, hold
| ing beer-mugs to their lips. The prOfes-
sor was badly sold, for the boys, with pals,
had caught every drop of beer that had
been poured out of the secOnd-stOry win
dow, and the trick was hencefOrth regis
tered as one of the most successful that
the college wits had perpetrated.