davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
HlInlOr.

WHAT Larber mustn't do-Lather
his wife.
WHY is poker like an angry word?
Because it stirs up a smouldering fire.
QUERY-Can it be called feat of
skill when person throws up his situa-
ton?
WHEN is an encampment most likely
to burn we'll? When the tents are
pitched.
WHY is solar eclipse like woman
whipping her boy? Because it's hid
ing Of the sun.
A LITTLE girl of eight or ten summers
being asked what dust was, replied that
it was mud with the juice squeezed out.
"SHoULD I be discovered, I am lost"
exclaimed the hero of a melodrama, as
he concealed himself in Il closet on the
stage. "Should you be discovered,
you will &c found, was the amendment
of a wag in the gallery.
"WrFE, what has become of the
grapes 2" 81 suppose, my dear, the
hens picked them off, was the bland
reply. Hens-hens some two-legged
hens, guess" said the husband, with
some impetuosity to which she firmly
replied, "My dear, did you ever see
any other kind p
A SLIGHT MIsrAKE.-A rural gentle
man visiting friend, found at the back
of the house, after dusk, an immense
an axe, and when he had chopped the
l., 30 N,I< 10 4
covered it to be a garden-hoe which
should have been hung up in the tool
house.
Foul PRoMoTIoN.-" Why did the
general take you on his statf?'' was
asked of young Hussar not long ago
by an enthusiast. "Oh I'll tell you
because cut =" Through the ranks
of the enemy, you hero !' interrupted
the enthusiast (she was LADY,. "Oh I!
dear no, nothing of the sort it was be-
cause l cut up turkey so well !'
SIMPLICITY. distinguished journal
ist announces that he has positively re-
ceived the following request: "Sir, L
should feel much honored by having
your autograph for my album. If you
deem the request unwarranted on my
part, pray pardon me, but at the same
time send the refusal in your own hand
writing, and with your own signature,
that | may know the refusal is au-
thentic.
"PA," said son to his father, "what
is meant by a chip of the old block 2"
"Why, my son, do you ask the ques-
tion?' "Because was in Enfield this
morning, and told them gentlemen
while hunting 1 saw fifty squirrels up
one tree. They kept trying to make
me say that / did not see but forty nine
and because [ wouldn't say so they said
was chip the old block. Hem
Well, my son, they only meant that you
were smart and honest, like your pa.
You can go out to play now"
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
DOMESTIC ECONOMY.

\ WASH, consisting OF one or two
drachms of hydrochloric acid in about
four ounces of water, has been recon-
mended as sure cure in cases of chap
ped hands.
APPLES always keep better when pro-
tected from currents of air, which change
the temperature often. A uniform tenn
peraturc is best. Hence they do better
in barrels headed up than exposed on
shelves or in tight boxes.
EGG SAUCE. Make drawn butter,
chop two hard boiled eggs quite fine,
the white and yclk separately, and stir
it into the sauce before serving. This
is used for boiled fish or vegetables.
LEMON SAUcE.-Make drawn or
melted. butter sauce, cut lemon into
very thin slices, take out the seeds and
stir the slices into the sauce, give it one
boil, then serve over boiled fish, fowl,
or meat.
BEEF LIvER-Cut the liver in thin
slices, dip each slice in wheat -four or
rolled crackers, and fry in hot lard or
beef dripping season with pepper and
salt. 1t must be thoroughly cooked and
a fine brown.
BUTTER SAUCE Beat quarter of a
pound of butter to a cream, add tea
spoonful of pepper and salt each, beet it
baked or boiled potatoes and cold meat;
or, over boiled vegetables.
MANY entertain the notion that furs
need to be protected against moths
during the hot weather only. This is a
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

And, i'll short, the two lovers were as
happy as heart could desire.
Ruth Morgan's anxiety at Milly's sud-
den disappearance had been relieved by
intelligence of her safety; and Ruth
was in high spirits when Mr.. Ryors
called, determined, this time, to bring
matters to a crisis. He had more than
once tried the plan of gradual ap-
proaches. On this occasion he resolved
to come directly to the point, and had
actually gotten half way on his knees
when Ruth said, quietly
"Do not be two hasty, Mr.. Ryors ;
you may regret it.
"There is but one thing | can regret
your refusal.
"My uncle's will" began Ruth.
Il know; it left you all he had, )" in
terrnpted the gentleman; "but that is
nothing to me-.
"And quite as little, assure you, to
me" said Ruth "When his will took
effect, my uncle had nothing to leave. "
The knecling process was suspended
midway, and Mr.. Ryors remained in a
very uneasy and not altogether graceful
posture, while Ruth continued
My uncle had sometime before
made a deed, you see, conveying his en-
tire estate in trust for the benefit of my
Cousin Mlly, reserying only life in
terest to himself.
The hinges of Mr.. Ryors knees sud
denly uncrooked.
"Good good-morning, Miss Nor
gan, he stammered.
"Good - good morning, sir" said
Ruth, bursting into Il ringing laugh
when the discounted sritor's back was
turned.
'It shall never standr' said Milly,
when she and Ruth met, few days
later. Your claims on your uncle
were as good as mine, and the property
shall be equally divided"
" Don't trouble yourself, little one"
said Ruth. "Bcfore Uncle Rolin pro-
vided for you, your aunt, by an under
standing between them, settled her for
tune on me. Won't it console Mr.. Ry-
ors to hear it %
But that will of lncle's-"
'Was made to save You from for
tune hunting husband,' replied Ruth.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
CuriOuS. if True.

A correspondent of the New York
Times relates the following incident i'll
connection with the sinking of the Vile
French priest, who never for a moment
lost his self-control in the frenzy which
ragged around him, or missed, as far as
l could see, single opportunity
of comforting or ncrving those who were
about to die. Are you Il Catholic?' |
heard the father ask of passenger near
him. / am, was the reply. Make an
act of contrition, then, and l will alb
solve you, said the priest; and these
were his last words on earth. The ves-
sci sank Immediately, and the father
was drowned ; but the gentleman with
whom he converscd was among the
saved
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
The West Beginn ng to Assert Its
Power in Congress.

There is evidently a revolt on foot,
and the West, as Judge Wright yester-
day declared, is coming to the front as
dictator of continental policy. The re-
cent speeches in the Senate upon the
financial resolutions are remarkable
merely for their declaration of distinc-
tive Western policy, not only in finance,
but in the matter of internal and trans
portation policy. Judge Wright and
Logan yesterday, Oglesby to-day, and
later, too, the vigorous speech of Sena-
tor Gordon, which clearly indicates the
South's acceptance of Western leader
ship in such matters, are remarkable
indications of the tendencies alluded to.
~. LOMis Globe.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
Fish Diet.

Those nations who eat fish with one
meal, each day, are undoubtedly the
most active in intellect, and the most
capable of brain labor without exhaus-
ton OF fatigue. Not only is such phos-
phatic food conducive to the activity of
the brain, but it promotes fecundity,
and increases the ability to endure cold,
fatigue, ETC.; and while the facilities for
obtaining it are constantly increasing, it
would be well for the rising generation
were they made to partake of and realize
it as second only in many respects to the
staff of life and the husband and father
who occasionally takes half a day from
his legitimate business to fill his basket
with delicious fish, should not be con-
sidered as mere sportsman, but a
"good provider" for his family of those
things which are of vital utility. -Heratd
of Hen/tI
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
NUMBER %.
BISHOP BERK E:LEN's NOUS POEM

I'VE reproduce below the celebrated poem I
Bishop Berkeley, in which the oft-quoted line,
" Westward the course of empire takes its way
occurs
VERSES ON THE PROSPECT or PLANTING ARTS AND
LEARNING IN AMERICA.
The Muse, dsgusted at age and cline
Barren of every glorious theme,
In distant lands now waits better time,
Producing subjects worthy fame.
In happy climes, where from the genial sun
And virgin earth such scenes ensuc.
The force of Art by nature seems outdone,
And fancied beauties by the true:
In happy climes, the scat of innocence
Where nature guides and virtue rules,
Where men shall not impose for truth and sense
The pedantry of courts and schools:
There shall be sung another golden age,
The rise of empire and of arts,
The good and great inspiring Epic rage
The wisest heads and noblest hearts.
Not such AS Europe breeds in her decay;
Such as she bred when fresh aud young,
When heavenly flame did animate her clay,
By future poets shall be sung.
Westward the course of Empire takes its way;
The four first Acts already past
A fifth shall close the Drama with the day;
Times noblest offspring is the last.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
A Preliminary Difficulty.

The professor of natural philosophy in
certain college recently gave the class
problem to think of during the night
and answer the next day. The question
was this IF hole We're bored through
the center of the earth, from side to
side, and "A bali dropped into it, what
motion would the ball pass through and
how would it come to Il state of rest o.
The next morning IL student was called
up to solve the problem. "What an
swer have you to give to the question ?"
asked the professor. ''Well, really. "
replied the student, Il have not Thought
of the main question, but OF a prelimi-
nary one. How are yoh going to get
that hole through p
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
CONFINEMENT.

tSuggestcd on seeing little picture of an aged
couple seated i'll a log-cabin before fire at bed
time
Tho banks Is all Dustin, Nance, an things is gon
ter smash:
The people sold fur credit what they'd oughter sell
fur cash,
An winters bringin' poverty to ever body's door
The rich kin stand it pretty wcll-hit's orfu the
poor.
The worFtu' mans the sufferer, Nance; he's got
work to do:
An folks goin to suffer whar they sufTern'
never knew,
An them that's always Shown of" to poor folks
what they We got,
You' find I"rhaps, that they turn ont the poorest
of the lot
I've ist been thnkin, Nancy Jane, about the awful
muss;
How folks had better live an raise thar chdren list
like us,
For, as told Old Deacon Smith he scd it all was
He never in his life had seed two folks like me an
you.
Our homes an old los-cabn, Nance, haif-hiddrn in
Our family's rich in life and health, bu, poor in
''wur,llv Goods"
We hant no fin" lace curtains, or carpet on the
floor,
But the always srnillirl' through the window
an the door.
Our farm is small-we've got Il spring and horses,
hogs and cows
We've gals to milk, an cock. an sew, an bows to
tend the plows,
We've got no gold in banks that bust nor owe no
man a cent
1 tell you, Nance the Lord is good, and we should
feel content.
We're plain and honest country folks, au' know no
lefty airs; -
We read the Bible every night before We knecl in
We go to church Sundays Nance and walk inst
like the rest.
An live like Christian people ought--wc try TO do
what's best.
Our boys dont do like city boys who from thar duty
shrk,
Whose parents 'cm up to think ris a disgrace
Ia work.
our gals amt like them city gals you will so often
meet,
Who ought to help their mothers more an run less
ON tue street.
You don't see Thomas Henry pnshn billiards every
night,
Or loafn bout the tavern gcttn treated till he's
tight.
You dou't find him runnn' round to catch some
dam.ol's eye,
Or conrtn' of some gal that's rich whose daddy's
bout to die.
All! Nance, the time has come at last when pride
must have it's fan;
The folks II find the workiu' man tbc llfc and ,,ror
of all;
The farmers independent, Nance, his trade will
never spoil
So long as he is able with his sons to til! TIE soil
The proud, arisocra;ic folks, who sot in fortunes
door.
Who thought they'd never come to want. are
"busted up an poor;
Their servants gone their horses Sold their houses
an their lands,
An cvcrylhin except their lives are in the Sherin,s
hands.
Old won'"n put your knittin up; its gettin' purity
late,
I'll read bout two chapters in the Bible, if you'll
wait
ought,
An thank Him, not for what we want, but what
we've had, an got.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
Pickerel Shooting on the Northern
Lakes.

The pickercl is fish of the same
family as the voracious pike, with some
resemblance to Il perch. 1t is dark
green on the back, and is marked with a
few ye!lowish, Irregular spots on the
sides, those on the fins being dark. In
form it is shorter and deeper than the
pike, and the scales are rough. 1t has
"a spiny dorsal fin like the perch, and
this, as we shall see, proves often fatal
to it,
1t is generally taken by trolling, but
does not bite readily. 1t is essentially
a game fish, and is highly priced,
though many objects to it's muddy
flavor, acquired by it's haunting sluggish
water and basking among water-plants.
Every country boy has caught them
with his impromptu fishing pole of
hickory and worm-bait. But it is not
only in this way that they afford sport.
Notwithstanding takes its place with
pickcrcl- fishing. AS soon as the North
ern Lakes and streams are clear of ice,
the picherel make their way into the
warm, shallow water of marshy spots
in order to spawn. Here they can be
seen lying, the back fin trcacherously
betraying them. The shooter quietly
paddles, his boat or wades into close
range, and, il anything of shot, will
bring up three or four pickeral at
time.
This strange cunning makes some of
the streams quite lively, but leads to
the destruction of great quantities of
this fish, which is too good to be exter-
minated
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
Hasty Courtslip and its Consequences.

On the Fourth of July last an inter
esting young couple met at a moonlight
picnic in New York. As they were for
eigners, they did not appreciate the
spirit of the day, for, instead of assert
ing independence like the old colonists,
they fell into each others arms and de-
clared they would be mutual slaves.
Such thraldom meant matrimony, of
course. He gave her money to pur
chase rings and things, and she looked
forward to the lighting oft Hymens
kerosene lamp as an event SO near that
her heart jumped. But he, finding
that instead of dressmaker, as he sup
posed her, she was only Il box-factory
girl, tore himself from her side, repudi-
ated the results of the moonlight meet
ing, and declared himself fancy free.
She brought her broken heart to the
courts, where he claimed that when the
contract of marriage was made he was II
minor. As, of course, it was preposter-
ous that Il man under tweuty-one years
of age could agree to marry without his
mas consent, the jury let him off. AS
she returns to her work at the box
factory, she has one consolation, the
worth of which she may not appreciate
it is, that it was her good fortune not
to be dressmake~.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

\ curious phenomenon is now existing
in Paris. Dr. Tenting received recent
" the visit of II singular client, being
young girl OF eighteen, named Marie
Verdun, living with her mother i'll the
Rue Du Colombier, and afflicted with
the infirmity OF nyotaloope, that is to
say, she loses the faculty of sight in
daylight and RECEIVERS it i'll darkness.
Although her eyes do not present any
special morbid character, she is forced
to keep her eyelids closed during the
day, and to cover her head with thick
veil. On the other hand, when the
shutters of Il room are Theoretically
fastened she reads and writes perfectly
in the deepest darkness. She feels no
pain beyond slight lassitudo when the
solar light strikes her visual organs.
The cure of affections of this kind are
said to be extremely difficult, rs the
cause can hardly ever be discovered.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

FAST TALKING.-One of our contem-
poraries publishes some statistics upon
the important subject of the relative
speed in talking of men and women.
Photographic reports of speeches and
the length they occupy when printed are
the evidence upon which the statistics
are foun!ed, and from this it appears
that forty-fve minutes lecture recent
ly delivered by Mrs. Burnham filled
three and one-half columns of the st.
Louis Dcmocrnt Mr.. Wendell Phil
lips and Rev. Henry Ward Beecher
some time ago lectured two hours in st.
Louis, and while the former filled four
and one-half columns the latter filed
five. Mrs. Burnham, it seems, did
faster talk than either of the others
but the world will not be content to de-
eide the question solely upon this sin
gle instance of woman's ability to out
talk men.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
How the Siamese Twins Got Their
Wives

Much speculation has always been
rife as to how the twins courted, and
finally became Joined in the bonds of
Hymen. 1t happened that they were
travelling through the South, and stop
ped at the town of Traphill, in Wilkes
county, n. c. The country in this
locality being very romantic, and the
land good, the twins determined to
settle, and accordingly engaged in busi-
ness III the village, being excellent
traders, and their novel condition soon
attracted many persons to them among
these farmer named Yates, who lived
in the immediate vicinity, and was pos
sessed of two bouncing daughters.
Chang and Eng looked upon these
women tenderly, and evinced great
affection for them, and, like rdinary
young folks, made numerous calls at
the residence of their bewitchers, and
there being pair of them all around, a
match was soon made, and the four were
two (or one). These wives always dis
played great affection for their iege
lords, and manifested the usual jeal-
ousies common to the human family.
From this double union there were some
twenty-five children born. Mrs. Chang
presented her husband with some nine
or ten, and of these but two were boys,
while IN the Eng family the daughters
were proportionately outnumbered.
The offspring, contrary to the general
opinion and preceding statements, with
few exceptions, were healthy, robust
children n-Cor. PhHodcI3hia Prtss.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
Expenditures of the United States
Government for Eight Years,

The Secretary of the Treasury, in re-
sponse to resolution of the Senate,
has made out the following statement
of money expended by the gen
eral Government on public works in the
several States and Territories from
June 30, 1865, to June 30, 1873:
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

"WHo cut your clothes, Tommy ?"
asked a visitor of curiously ragged
boy. "Well,' said he ingenuously,
INA cuts my pants, and pa cuts my
jacket"
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28
All Sorts.

|
Mr.. SUMNER is sixty-three years old.
PHILADELPHIA is $50, 0OO 600 in debt.
ST. LouIs has SIS, 400 dogs on her
registry list.
A BIBLE is placed on neat little
rack-ornament i'll each Pittsburgh
| horse-car.
CHIEF-J UsTICE WAITE has eleven chill
drcn. A little leaven leaveneth the
whole lump.
BEEcHER gets 50. 33 minute when he
lectures. This is most as satisfactory
as preaching.
ORANGES composed wholly of colored
persons are to be formed in Arkansas
and Mississippi.
Ocean between California and China is
said to be about two and half miles.
The total value of the precious
metals produced west of the Missouri
during 1873 is estimated at So, ,25S,-
693.
ADAM had one consolation when he
fell. Fifteen or twenty acquaintances
didn't stand on the opposite corner and
laugh at the mishap.
PROF. S. p. LANGLEY describes, in
the Pittsburgh Gazette spot on the
sun which covers the enormous area of
500, 100000 square miles.
Mr.. GEORGE M. ID. BLoss, for many
years an editor and proprietor of the
Cincinnati Eaquire,, mas dissolved his
connection with that journal.
Gov. DAVIS, of Minnesota, saws that
every railroad in the State has been
Systematically violating the law by in
creasing the tariff on freights.
THE Pope's list of new Cardinals in
cludcs six Italians, two Frenchmen,
one Spaniard, two Austrians and one
Portuguese. This leaves out America
and England and Germany altogether.
Protestant lands have either no claims,
or it is believed that free institutions
make even the faithful not quite to be
trusted.
DU CHAILLU has found the model
wife: 81 remember being in mag
niticcnt country seat i'll the south of
Sweden, owned by a man whose annual
income from land was $4,000, and vet
ii'' WIG V1lIiS apptdltu III Cdllto
dress, with nothing in the shape of
adornment except velvet ribbon round
her neck.
A MAN in England, who had been di-
vorced from his wife, became engaged
to young lady, and subsequently
meeting his divorced wife, fell in love
with her and married her again. The
disappointed aspirant for the vacant
heart and home sought consolation in
an action for breach of promise, and
was awarded $15, 600 damages.
The Memphis Aualonchc says that
one of its reporters, in Il fight in the
Board of Aldermen, was knocked over
three desks and half dozen Ameri-
cans. No such calamity could ever oc-
cur in Chicago. A reporter might be
knocked over the entire city hall, and
not pass over half-dozen Americans in
his flight. chicago Times.
Or the Chief Justices of the United
States, John Jay was A at the time of
his first appointment in 1889, and 55 at
his second in 1900 William Gushing,
appointed in 1895, was SO. Oliver
Ellsworth was 81. Rutledge, appoint
ed in 1875, but not confirmed, was S.
Marshal was IS Mr.. fancy was 56
Mr.. Chase was 55. Mr. Gushing,
nominated, but not confirmed, is H.
Mr.. Waite is So.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

A YOUNG student wants us to tell him
if W-o-r-c-e-s-t-e-r spells Wooster, why
Rochester don't spell Rooster.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

SINCE the establishment of the Gov
ernment it has given away 1862, 800
acres of land to soldioIs, making in all
half a million farms of 100 acres each.
If the half million of farms were occu-
pied by these soldiers, they wonld
greatly add to the productions of the
country but they are sold to specula-
tors who hold them for years, await
ing good prices and large profit.
Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1874-02-28

VICTOR HUGo intends to devote his
time, in future, to literature.