The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1874-03-20

that any life would 90 anu sometimes
Doctor, fsur days before / saw you l
met upon a New Jersey ferryboat a
Young girl. So pretty, so refined, and
nice / followed her to her home-the
devil that has taken possession of me
led me. She went in, and soon came
ont again into her little garden, and
tended her fowers-poor child Doc
tor, if / had pistol with me / should
have shot her You may smile; but
some day soon shall take pistol on
purpose and shoot her.
"It was clearly no use arguing with
him. The best way with such people is
to admit their facts and try to work
round them.
"'Then, said /, 'the only thing you
can do is to submit to the restrictions
of an asylum till this feeling has
passed.
"It will not pass. If / were to GO
to a madhouse / should sham sane.
Sooner or later their vigilance over me
would be relaxed. Then / should muir
der my keeper and go straight for that
innocent girl.
"'Then leave the country.
"'Well, that would save her but,
Doctor, one life is as dear to its holder
as another. If 1 don't kill her shall
kill some one else.
"My dear fellow 1 replied, in as
light tone as could assume, these
fancies are durable. Put yourself un-
der skilled medical treatment. You are
all to bits, physically. Get sound in
body, you'll get all right in mind.
GO On the contrary, / am all to bits,
as you say, mentally, and my body suf-
fers through my mind. Medical treat
ment 1 have consulted every practi-
toner of note here and in Europe.
Some think 1 am fooling them some
look wise, and talk as you do about
treatment. All have failed. Doctors
are no use to me-
Then may 1 ask why you have
come here?
"'To ask your advice as friend, he
answered, drawing his chair nearer to
me, 'and' lowering his voice, 'to ask
you one question as friend and a God
fearing man, and to which l pray you
give me plain yeS or no.
eco on.
us I6tl, Slldll DC lliSll-
fed before God in taking my own life ?
Will it be deadly sin for me to do for
myself what l would do for mad
dog?'
&c repeat his words as he spoke
them. l cannot give you the faintest
idea of the solemn deliberation with
which he put this awful question. For
some moments could not say a word.
Then l started up and told him that /
would not answer him yes or no-that
it was not fair to ask me to take such a
responsibility. Then he rose, too, and
said that he must resolve it for himself,
and I saw plainly which way it would
go. Give me till tomorrow to think
about it,, l said, OBTAINING him.
"'To-morrow may be too late, he re-
piled. The fit may come upon me to-
night for all know
"' Come home with me I'm not
afraid. You won't hurt me, 1 said.
"' would try very hard not to do so
butt know myself. / cannot trust
myself. Don't you trust me-
6 will trust you but I'll do more.
You are not armed, suppose?'
"No,' he replied with a shudder,
not now.
I'll take care that you shall not be,
and Ill carry my Derringer in my pock-
ct. On the first indication of homicidal
mania, give you my word I'll shoot,
and I'll shoot straight. 1 said this to
satisfy him, poor fellow In his weak
state could have laid him down like a
child. 1t did satisfy him, and we went
home together. L led him to talk of
our old soldering days, and gradually
got him back to his wound. made
him describe the first sensations of pain
in his head, and repeat all that his diff
ferent medical advisors had said. /
happened to have strong preparation
of hasheesh by me. 1 gave him n
dose, and while under its influence,
carefully examined his head Now, the
head, you must know, does not fatten or
waste away i'll proportion to other parts
of the body. Still his had become mere
skin and bone ; and this state, perhaps,
gave me an advantage over others vino
had made the same examination. AT
last felt, or thought felt, faint
twitching-a sort of abnormal pulsation
about two inches above the left ear.
it might be merely nervous, but il
might be the ball.
81 then Sc. my mind to work and
thought the whole case over steadily.
In the first place, was that impulse to
take human life, of which my poor
friend had spoken, really uncontrolla-
BILE For example, suppose that one
day he did take pistol 'on purpose,
and go to that young lady's garden
would he shoot her? To suppose that
the insane mind never changes its pur-
pose, or turns from the fell completion
of its purpose, is to say in other words
that the insane mind is stronger than
the sane mind. If man with freshly
broken leg were to tell you he was go
ing to run a foot race, you would not
believe him, because your common
sense revolts against the idea of his
running with leg disabled. But if one
with his brain disabled declares that he
is going to do something dependent up
on the action of his mind, common
sense does not always argue so well.
"In the second place, did my poor
friend, with his impaired means OF
Judgment believe that the impulse was
uncomfortable? Because if he did the
end would be the same so far as he was
concerned. He would sacrifice his own