The Portland daily press., 1874-02-06
THE PRESS.

FRIDAY MORNING. FEB. 6. 1874
Gossip and Gleanings.
Old folks say this winter is like 1916
"a Western butcher, whose premises were
robbed, said he lost fesh.'"
There is one thing which we should always
keep, especially after We have given it to
another, and that is our word.
nature provides no reserved seats for the
rich and da'niily reared. When there is ice
on the pavement, they sit where they can.
TIE habit OF being always employed is a
great safeguard through life, as well as essen
tial to the culture of every virtue.
Young ladies who lace themselves too tight
ly when dressing for dinner, evidently prefer
grace before meat.
Rise If the Past detain you,
No chains so unworthy to hold you,
As those OF vain regret.
"Don't Quaker ever take off his hat to
any one mammal "No, my dear.'' ''If he
don't take off his hat to a barber how does he
have his hair cut?''
Lent begins this year on the 18th of Fe5r,,-
ary, and ends with Saturday, April 4th. If
the first Thursday of April is appointed Fast
Day, it will suit those sects that observe Lent
There is nothing quite so exhausting to
newspaper man as to write up compliment
ary notice of local exhibition, in which
there are thirteen performers who design
sending copies Of the paper TO their friends
A gentleman going up Sixth avenue, New
York, met a laborer, to whom he said: "Will
you tell me if am half way to Central
Park? % "Faith an will,' was the reply, eff
you tell me where you started from.''
prisoner in petty court was asked by
the judge if be had any counsel. eyes" he
said. II had an old bald-headed fellow TO de-
tend me, but don't see him round, andI rath-
er guess he's out for drink.
SIS that marble ?'' said gentleman. point
ing 10 the bust of Kentucky's great states
man. mo, sir; that's Clay" quietly replied
the dealer.
Editors sanctum-Enter foreman-"Half
dozen lines wanted, sir. to block out with.
Give us joke on annexation Married ed
itOr, adjusting his spectacles with an air OF
surprise -"Ah, but annexation is no joke
Brooklyn Argns.
"Pray, Sir" said young Singalese. learn
ing English, to his tutor, ''am raw when
clothes are OFF," ''Not unless you have rub
bed your skin off. Tell me, why do you ask ?"
He ops ned dictionary, and pointed to .'Raw,
undressed."
A Paris correspondent says it is cnrrent
joke there that no titled person may be too
old or ugly or impoverished but that he may
hope to pick up an American girl who will
give him heaps CT dollars to become Madame
la Duchese or Madam la Baronne.
The Troy Times illustrates New York state
progress by the following cheering catalogue
Utica will have the state fair, Troy is going
| to have the national amateur regatta, Sarato-
| ga expects the intercollegiate regatta, Alba
ny has the legislature, Rome has the scarlet
fever, Syracuse wants a new chatter, Roches-
ter has the Holly water works, Buffalo is get
ting over the chicken fever, and Watertown
has the measles, a divorce case and twins.
A lost COW was lately advertised by the fol-
lowing notice which was posted on trees and
fences near the owners dwelling: '.Strayed
or Sto!en-.A large red Kow, with Yaller
Specks on her left side, and pair of white
specks on her right ear. She is about seven
or eight years old, and belongs to poor wild
ow with short tail. Ten dollers will be given
to anybody who return her to Newark, Gune
II, 18OO72."