The farmers' vindicator. (Jackson, Miss.) 1873-1???, 1874-06-19
Only to Harry Dudley did he re-

"By Jovel the girl is shy; but !
really love the little witch, and, OF
course, Hal, she won't refuse me; we'll
be married in a month, and you shall
be first groomsman egad! wasn't it a
big stroke of good luck when came
on visit to this musty old town and
found that brilliant little beauty? But,
then, if she were an old maid, seventy
five years old, and minus hair and
teeth, and wrinkled as a baked
sweet apple" I'd wed her just on &C
count of her great expectations;Y that
old woman in the city is as rich as a
Jew and old as Methuselah, so she'll
have to shuttle off her mortal coil ere
long. How glum you look, Hall One
would think you envied me my happi-
nessl"
Il do mott" Harry grimly nplied.
At last the looked for day arrived
that had been appointed by Grace for
Alfred to receive his answer. Never
was there toilet more carefully ar
ranged than that of the smitten swain;
his boots rivaled the midday sun; his
broadcloth was withoutspot or blemish
and his kids immaculate; in fact, he
was a spectacle to fairly put out the
eyes of any rash mortal that turned
their adventurous gaze upon him; none
but fully fedged eagles might dare to
look.
Thus our Romeo sought the presence
of his fair Juliet. She received him
kindly, almost tenderly, he thought,
and his courage never faltered; as he
alluded TO the object Of his call, in
tones Of dulcet sweetness, he imagined,
Grace arose and handed him a pack
age, saying
Mr.. Burnham, here is what you
desire. | deemed it as only Just to re-
ward your unwearied attentions, and
hope the result will prove as satisfac-
tory to yourself as it has to me-"
Alfred looked astonished, Mile
Grace continued, w
"Undo the package, my dear sir,
and you will then, | trust be able to
fathom my meaning"
He complied, and there, disclosed to
his bewildered gaze, lay-a lady's
pocket-book /! ~
He looked at i IN speeches ,hasson-
ishsst OF our our Mace rose, and SlttIl her
most hooking smile, said,
"My dear Mr.. Durham, one pleas.
ant day | CHANGED to take a stroll into
yonder old woods, and, finding a cosy
nook, seated myself to enjoy one Of
my favorite authors; while there, the
stiffness of the place caused me to fall
asleep, but | was soon awakened by
the sound of voices. Thinking they
would pass on immed lately, 1 did not
discover myself, and so unwittingly
overheard conversation in which | |
was the person under consideration
therefore you cannot be at all surprised
at your receiving from my hands what
you professed to have such a strong
affection fora lady's pocket-book;
don't thank me, you are quite welcome,
and your Miss Simplicity INDUCES the
hope that your glorious Irritation has
been very pleasant When next you
woo AN unsophisticated country girl,
beware lest the tables are turned"
And, with graceful bow, she swept
from the room with all the dignity i'm
aginable.
Alfred Burnham rose, took his new
beaver, and fairly sneaked out of the
house; his lesson was hard, but de-
served.
When he arrived at the home of
Harry, he incoherently muttered some
thing about Telegram from his uncle,
deuced sick, great bore, must start on
the night express, due in ten MINUTES"
and in less time than it takes 4 write
it, our hero had departed, a sadder, if
not wiser, man.
In less than month he received the
cards Of Mr.. and Mrs. Harry
Dudley; the bride being, to his aston
Miss Grace Clifton.
"Humbuggedl outwitted duped!
by Jove, by a womanl" he said, as he
strobe across the room in a manner
that would have made his fortune on
the stage of a theatre.
That the unlucky wight survived is
certain, as in a short time he kneeled
before the hymeneal altar with a de-
signing old maid, who married him for
lis money, as he did her for hers; and
we may add that both were equally
cheated.