, 1874-09-27
THE QUEBEC BARBER.
His Adventures in Searching for
Business in the City-I1all.
His Failures and Successes.


tAeEe days when early picty, or too close app!i
cation to study, CT an ovc--1ndulscEce at the ta'
bic or elsewhere. is 60 certain to denude the
ecalp of all tho capillary attractions which
oro used to read about in tic
Ele,nqnts Of Natural Philosophy. Nowadays, in
fact, the color and cut Of mans hair is matter
of lt4lo consequence to either li1nseK or hiH
reighbors. The day of tie penlu1ous plS-tai]
has gone BIZ, and tho luxury cTen Of allowing
the hair to rcst gracefully upon and grease tho
coat-collar is monoro!izcd by these only vino can
Law claim to musical, or artistic. or poetic pro-
clvities. Consequently. tho A5ea!onic 6t,la in
modern daya is extremely scarce, and when it is
present the observer il confused with epecu1a-
tious ss to whetLcr tho owner requires guitar,
r. nalIotte. or = bunch OF comets 10 complete
his identity.
Even With the fair sc1 the old Sctirtt1ral OBJ
eerration hardly holds good. as since lie intro
duction Of tho cgnon i. is in come other woin-
ans hair that mos. OF them take pride. 1t il
tafe to say, thcn that in this ninetccuth century
at least masculine humanity cares q good deal
more for what III i'll tho inside than on tbs out
eido Of mans head It is we'll that it is 80, for
it is unlcniabie that the hslprcssuro life which
oven tho mcst commonplace OF men now 1--we
and Leave him at remarkably early ego with
Furnished top 10 lis craniu1n, back to which
rcitlcr tie " Incompatible oil 2Iecassac.' nor
Mrs Lyon's Eathalron nor tho most electric OF
brushes can WOO eln1lc hair. 1t 1n3y bo that
the tendency to respect n person whose llead las
lost its natural covering was cnscndeieu ~
THE AWFUL FATE
which overlook COMPANY Of young men who.
soue t:1no ago, with remarkably bad taste and all
utter disregard OF consequences, rouShed Al Old
,.e,,tienan Oh his capillary deficiencies and
caused him to retalatc bJ handing them over to
tho tho ''''ts,t'' fact stands So t.lat now one is
yer- seldom tsitted upon his badness.
aEd, if such thing docs happen, the owner OF
the deficiency relics for redress upon the grease
of the bear latLcr than his carliyo1ous pruFcE-
sit;rs. j.
1t il rather singular thing that tho class Of
1nr;l in Chicago most afflicted with baldness aro
tLose whose duties Lie in
THE clTT~nALL.
Why the crown Of Mayor, or Mayors SccTo-
tnly. or . Polce-CoMulissloner, or City Clerk,
or Public-Works Commissioner, or anyone clso
iE the Ciry-ual, should be moro liable to lose
its covering than that of the ordinary citizen is
conference OF al tho City Boards, the
Iaw Department, the Mayor and the Common
Council ; and even all this combined wisdom
might not fatllom the mystery. It il bad enoneh
to know that the early plety Of eotne Of the city
oflicn!s, aud tho studious habits CT others, or
something else, hns removed their hair but it
is too bad to know that the fact las been
bruitcd abroad, that it !sas become known in tho
Eastern scction Of the country. upon wllosa COED
opinion OF Chicago and everything connected
with Chcaso her destiny hangs. What II
fIfI BOARD OF UNDERWRITERS
e1ou!d learn that Marshal Beuncrs hair Tas
falling o,lr fast and that Marshal letres eca!p
was AZ smooth and bright rs billiard bail! The
consequences too terrible to think about, much
less speculate upon in printers ink. Among
other Eastern notab!cs, however, wno had heard
ST the badness OF seTer.l OF the city officials
was
A AckSADIAS BARBER
who in the vilds Of citade,cd and waIl-enyironed
Quetec learned Tic fac: and started for this CITY,
Ee arrived here in duo course Of time, and
fastened to the Cty-Hall yesterday u'ornin5
With stock of wigs aud plentiful supply OF
circulars which set forth. among other things, an
slal1uitsG list of crowned heads upo: which he
had had TIC honor of bestowins professional at-
tent:oEs. It il painful TO think that tho
man who had conbed the Royal locks
Of HIS Hiehuess tie Prince Of
T.!cs, who Lad sllampooed Prince Alfrcd's hair
who had ccaxea the gentlcst OF blonde whlskc1s
ducal chiis in his time. and trimmed and twirled
the nonstaches Of Earls and aiarqu,ses, should
fail 70 low Us to canvass' for patronage among
untitled republicans; but it 1nust DO remembered
that Quebec is nor1band borough, and that q
barber canno: liys upon the rccoi!cctionB Of hiB
by-gonc Intimacy with royalty aud the nobility
and gentry. Tho first Office the barber-baud-
boxes II tne hand and circulars IN the other
called at was thnt Of the Mayor, to enter which
lie WIS Obliged to PASS through that OF
THE MAYORS SECRETARY
mr. Cleveland. Uut glance at the luminous
knob Of the ecrai-clcrlcxl Secretary showed the
barber that lc had chance for business. Gently
approaching: Mr.. Cleveland ho tappca the bald
Epots on the ton of his head. renlarlang 1nslnu-
a;ipgly. There is something want
ng hcre,-somcthins wanting here Tho
Secretary. who is rather irascielo at times,
misunderstood the alluaon As relating to tho i'll
ride instead OF the outside Of his head, and
jumped up hastily: rcmarI,nS n, 4: "Do you mean
manner did not desert him, and he replied gent
]v, No, cir; mean that you have no hair"
Ilis rcjouder put matters right, and
tho barber announced his m:ssion, and
told how ho had como over LOGO
miles to nut proper coverings upon llo denuded
crowns Of Chicago city officials. Tie Mayors
Secretary acknowledged frankly enough, that he
vas bald, and explained its caHso. Some years
ago. whcu quito young, ard possessed OF
glorious head of hair al! co!'4:s.:hee beatnint::
with good hnmog he had eutered tie service If
the Journal IA reporter. Ho told, with voico
;.apitasiug with emotion, how day after day his
melancholy position and the enforced scrloCE-
1ees Of his occupation had told upon him hoS
tle Joyous C0untCilAtlCc HAL hAAeu htclu uUN
the converting OF the Of the morning, pa 2era
into pathetic paragraphs had robbed him OF his
youtl-issd caused all his hair to fall out and
how his d.ily associations lad resulted in tue
clerical appearance which causcd lis letters fire.
quently to bea. the address Of ''TLe Reverend
Mr. Cleveland"
Touched with tho recital, tho provincial bar
Ter placed tbs very best wig on tho TOP OF tie
Secretary head, ard then stepped back to en-
joy the effect. Everybody had to acluovl-
cdgc that it WAS very tine. Tho
s;ocreta1y b'uslled aud coughed, and tried
to look Indifferent he looked into tho
laud-glaEs which he drew from tho drawer
ia front OF him, but lis sc!l-sstsfac-
ton wn. too lecp-scEted to be concealed. In
tho nidet Of his enjoyment the barber stepped
into
THE 1tAIon's OFFICE.
md arrroac cLcd Ills Honor. who was very buziiy
engaged writing letters. lie coughcd the cough
IF Indication Of presence but tho cxpressrlan
vicldcd his gold pen with tho sa,ne energy that
ia youthful days he applied TO tie disruption of
:s:.:.tosaa. and failed to look up. Ilen the bar
lar genllv remarked:
=. Your 1unu7-'
'' Sur u you -
Il ,l:;.usht "a call on you this morning, sir,
It, tcc i, couldn't get"
II Ecoa, N:ao is it? Father, mother, sis
:rr, brother Ee brief. Don't yan sec lin
Lazy :"
:. Get you to"
We'll. ~Eat has ho done? What vas tho