Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1874-04-15
SAYING PRAYERS.
mr.. Cruncher's Opinion of Mrs.
C~runcherss ssCrusade.s

Mr.. Dickens wrote something which at
TINS tlme IS exceedingly amusing and sug-
gestlve IN connection with the great EN-
perance crusade. Once upon a time, as
MI. Dickens relates in his "Tale of Two
cities" there lived in England a 'sresurrec-
ZIONIST" that IS to say a body-snateher, by
the name OF Jerry Cruncher, in whose
mouse the scene Ofour tale opens, just as the
hero awakens after a night spent at his IA
vorite occpation.
Mr.. Cruncher reposed under a patchwork
counterpane, like a harlequin at home. At
hrst he slept heavily, but by degrees began
tofroll and surge in bed, until he rose above
the surface with a spiky hair looking as if
1t must tear the sheets TO ribbons. At
which juncture he exclaimed in a voice of
evaporation:
'Bust me, if she amt at it again.
A woman Of orderly and industrious an
pearance rose from her knees in a corner
with sufficient haste and t~repidation to
show that she was the person referred to.
"What.p' said Mr.. Cruncher, looking out
of bed for a boot. "YOu're at it agin, are
you?"
After hailing the morn with this second
salutatiOn, he threw a boot at the woman
as a third.
"What," said Mr.. Cruncher. VARYING his
apoStrophe after missing his mark. @Syhat
are you up to, Aggerawayter?"
81 was only saying my prayers"
'Saylng your prayers? You are a nice
woman. What do you mean by Topping
yourself down and praying agin me?"
81 was not praying against you; 1 was
praying for YOU"
"fou Wern't. And if you were, l wont
be took the liberty with. Herel YOUR
mothers a nice woman, Jerry, going a pray
ing agin your fathers prosperity. You've
got a dutiful mother, you have, my boy;
going and Hopping herself down, and pray
ing that the bread and butter may be
snatched out Of the mouth of her only
childI'
Master Cruncher, who was in his shirt.
tOOkthis very ill; and, turning to his mother,
strongly deprecated any praying away of
his personal board.
Sand what do you suppose, you conceited
female" said Mr.. Cruncher, with uncon-
sciOus inconsistency, 'that the worth of
your prayers may be. Name the price that
you put your prayers at"
"They only come from the heart, Jerry.
They are worth no more than that"
"WOrth no more than that - repeated
Mr.. Cruncher. 'They amt worth much,
then. Whether or no, l won't be PRAYED
agin, l tell you. L can't afford it. I'm not
to be made unlucky by your sneak
ing. If you must 90 Hopping yourself
down, flop in favor of your husband and
child, and not in opposition to 'em. fl
had any but IN unnatural wife, and this
poor boy had any but an unnatural mother.
| might have made SOME money last week.
instead Of being counterprayed and coun-
tered and being religiOusly circumwented
the worst Of luck. B~u-u-ust," said
MIR. Cruncher, who had been all this time
on his clothes, IF 1 Amt, what
with piety and one blOwed thing and
another, been choused this last week into
as bad luck as ever a poor devil of an hon
est tradesman met with. Young Jerry.
dress yourself, my boy, and while | clean
my boots, keep an eye on your mother now
and then, and if you see any signs of more
~"ing, give me a call. For l tell you,n
~ad his wife once more. IL
lere ne ad1Fes-~ manner! -
won't be gone asln In tins