Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1874-10-28
Odds and Ends.

phur Springs. s..
IT is not falling in the river, but ~
ing in, that browns.
NORTHERN proverb-"God created
the world, but the devil made Iceland
WHEN does the wind deserve reproof?
When it whistles through the house.
EARLY to bed and early to rise will
all be in vain if you don't advertise.
The British tax on armorial bearings
rendered S4OO, 600 last year.
The White Mountains put on their
white night caps for winter Oct. l.
SEVEN hundred kegs of power were
fired il one blast at Sebastopol, CAL, a
few days since.
A SUNDAY-scHooL teacher recently
told his class that Jeremiah was the first
Prince of Walls. .:4s. .,..
TIE good of mans life cannot be
measured by the length of bis funeral
procession.
Chow many people," says Jeremy
Taylor, "are busy In this world gather
ing handful of thorns to sit upon!
A RUSSIAN proverb says: GO Before
going to war, pray once; before going
to sea, pray twice; before getting mar
ried, pray three times"
WHAT is the difference between an
auction and sea sickness ?-One is the
sale of effects, the other the effects of
sail
IT was bright boy that told his
teacher that there were three sects, the
male sex, the female sex and the in
sects.
To read daily newspaper is perhaps
the only duty outside Of drinking, eat
ing and sleeping, upon which Americans
are agreed.
"GooD morning, Smith; you look
sleepy" eyes," replied Smith, 81
was up all night" Cup where 2" Cup
stairs in bed"
Pnor Of the "Sphinx:" Blanche
loves the husband of Bertha; Bertha is
unhappy; Blanche poisons herself.
Music.-Bosto,a Post.
"BDDy, did you put an egg in the
coffee to settle it? eyes, mum: I put
in four; they were SO bad had to use
four Of them"
1HE New Britain Conn., water pipes
are so full of cells that when the people
want a fish breakfast they just turn the
faucet, and so save meat bills.
"MY dear SIR" said candidate, ac-
costing stray wag on the day of cleo
ton, "I am very glad to see you"
ssYou needn't be- replied the wag. :sI
have voted"
A RED-NosED gentleman asked wit
whether he believed in spirits. cay,
sir, replied he, looking him full in the
face, 81 see too much evidence before
me to doubt it.
KING GoMBA, of Africa, has made use
of the new cable to say to Boston:
Last missionary has just been put to
bake; rather thin; send something
corpulent. y
LAWN TENNIS. Maud Chow
do we stand 2" Capt. Lovelace: |'They
are six to our love; and love always
means nothing, you know" Miss Maud:
{" always?"
THERE is in the Island of Skye min
lister of one of the parish churches who
occupies the pulpit which his father,
grandfather, and great-grandfather have
filled In succession, and who is training
up son to be his successor.
A New HAVEN minister has been
preaching on the recent rush among the
Yale students, using the text: "And
the whole herd ran violently down a
steep place into the sea and persisted IN
the waters"
LANCASTER county, Pa, has an old
lady who recently refused the gift Of
load of wood from tree struck by
lightning, through fear that some of
the fluid might remain in the wood,
and cause disaster to her stove.
A GEORGIA planter drained his rice
swamp last year, land planted the ground
with corn last spring. A hybrid crop
is his reward, the stock, blades, and
cob being that of corn, while the ker-
nails on the cob are rice.
"LoNG-wINDED % isn't very elegant
expression to use in relation to deliver
ers of attenuated orations. Say that
thay are gifted with great continuity OF
breath, and you get at something ele-
giant as we'll as expressive.-Boston
Journal.
IF the time ever comes for the ex- r
PLANTATION of the mysteries OF this world,
we shall be glad to know why the young
man who remarks on leaving church,
st can preach better sermon than
that myself, is content to wear out his
life over a counter for $50 month.
NILSSON has had some new photo
graphs taken in London. They are
very namby PANTY looking. She IS
represented as standing before piece
of statuary, and has on dress of very
peculiar style. The statuary took an
excellent picture.
81 GAVE him piece of my mind,
said one of those emphatic persons.
'sOh, to be sure" was the quiet reply.
IS Are you quite sure you didn't give
him the whole of it Because you DO
not appear to have any left.
THERE is for sale at Pekin small
encyclopedia entitled can Imperial
Collection of Ancient and Modern
Literature. It is only composed OF
61O9 volumes, and may be had for
q