The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1874-10-10

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Vegetable philosophy-Sage advice.
A table Of interost--.Fhe dinner ia
Cremation 5aB9EhGseRe!s hseRe!sP light Of Il grave
subject.
Cure for fslon -Takoi 1t to the peni.
tertiary ,zttU4 .W y
a family of original -cremationiats-a
ou' L. GUS: s::5ioi,,,Yfmu} ohE
Tailor, measuring fat customer.-
"Would you hold the end, sir, wLilo L
so rouud?" ii "a In ~
Why are olergymen like TaiIHaynporss
ters,! Because they a. good :, deal Of,
coupling. - "
Looking two ways for Sunday
Scrutinizingin in duple directions for the
Christian Sabbath.
a Hobokcn editor, being challenged, ~
sent word in reply: when I want to
die l can shoot myself 'o''''
'He handled his gun carelessly, and
put on his angel plumlge,' is the latest,
Western obituary notice. A
A Yankee editor has recently -got uni
O remedy for hard times. It consists Of,
ten hours labor, we'll worked in.
The Western women have in great .
degree stopped praying in public and
arc making up their summer clothes.
1t is fashionable in England to jump,
fences for exercise, but very vulgar to
saw wood for tn, sac, thing. 19i'"G
An old gentleman of much exporieaoe a1ct''
in the world says that all that IS, tii,ccs;
sarY for the. perfect enjoyment of love-
SapSaSes isiconfidence, ,u;g. .q- .-,dr
eThe least said, tho soonest mended.',
The minimum Of an offensive remark,
is cobblcd with the greasest promoti-
tude. aHiA i''Tl'F! a@f Feta5 N9n
\ New York. merchant absent minda
| dly copied love letter to his .heare'si
idol" i'll the letter book of the firm be-
fore sending It. ilss3 9sssssE
a gentleman in Pottsyille, Penn, has
named his dog Penny, because it was
ono cent to him and has had ten mills
with the cat. ..
A placard in Brooklyn barber shop
window announces, Boots backefs in.d
side, Bnt must net that be very bad for
the stockings?' ~ ~
Why should there be more marriages
i'll winter than in summer? Because
IN winter the gentlemen require COM
lortcr; and the laiie, mufs. "pi"'A
1t is good ground for divorces : in ST.. =
Louis if wife finds ono hundred and a
thirteen love letters from red h,adad i
woman in her husbands pocket.
A cautious Evansville reporter, in 4
speaking ofa man both off whose logs
were cut offby railroad train, says,
.he will probably be a cripple for
life '13s st Sea
An old woman was beaten almost TO
death in Apapgo, Mexico rec,htly for
having brought the small pox into the V
community by means of witchcraft. I.,.
A Detroit paper, noticing tho facts
man lately dropped dead while comb-,
ing his hair, says, And yet there ara
people who will persilt in this d,nger-
Gus habit tt ~ asis
Meriden, Conn, has no coroaer, aud
the suicides of the city are forced to re.
sort to strangers, who have no tender,
feelings, and do not exclude reporters
from the inquest.
It occurred to Danbury scholar;
while writing composition, last week.
to make tie remarkable staten ,nt that,
AN OK Goes not taste as good as au oys
ter but it can run faster. lri,.
CoTrAGE'PUDDINa.-One eee. ! cum
sugar; l cup sweet milk; spoonful mel
ted butter; 2 cups -four; teaspoon of
soda an Of cream of tartar. Steam
hour. 10 be eaten with pudden
sauce.
The girls of Vassar College have
moonlight sails on the Hudson aud, the
young men of that vicinity ars gracious
ly permitted to stand on the shore Of
that noble river aaand see them 90 By.
No cards, and no hope Of any.
The Secretary Of the Kansas Board
of Agriculture Indignantly denies in
print that chinch bugs are there doinuo,
"a, l.. n ~