Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1874-11-20
MISCELLANEOUS UsITEMs.

ent lndt MS mOtner re- LED IN England ant
had reared him. his fat n having quarrelled
with her when he was an infant and hat
abandoned them, and it was supposed haC
come to America, but no tidings had beer
received from him. When the young man
had concluded the superintendent, who, fol
many years, had been employed by the firm
with whom he is at present engaged, said to
the astonished youth, 4" | am your father. u
They discussed family matters at length, and
the father, hearing from his son that his
mother had not ceased to mourn their unfor-
tunate difference and his absence, determin-
ed to proceed at once to Europe and bring
her to this country and endeayor in the fu-
ture to atone for the mistakes and errors of
past. He secured employment for his son,
and obtaining the necessary leave of absence
from his employers, he sailed last week for
England, intending to bring back with him
the wife from whom he had been so long
separated.
Wilkins Micawber Jones is of statistical
turn of mind. He can tell you precisely
how many Smiths there are in the directory
and how many Browns, Robinsons and jones.
| If you tell him the number of Smiths in a
place Of a given population he will tell you
how many Browns ought to live there to
maintain the average proportions of the two
| great families. 1t occurred to Jones the
other day that Mary is a very common name,
and after careful study he hit upon an orig
inal plan for ascertaining the prOportionate
number of women bearing it. This plan
was to station himself at an advantageous
position on one of our thoroughiares, address
| 10y that name every woman who passed in
an hour, and then compare the number who
answered to the name with the whole number
passing. Nothing could be simpler, thought
wilkins, and accordingly he began his ex-
pertinent the other evening Just as the theatre
going tide was flowing along the street.
| First came two demure-looking damsels,
- timii and stepping fast Jones let them
| 90 by and then called out suddenly "Mary ~
but the young women only hurried a little
faster, aud the ingenious Wilkins put down
two marks on the right side of his tally
paper. Just as he lifted his eyes he saw a
lady with an escort Just in front of him, and
blurted out GOOD evening, Mary - Great
ly to his astonishment the gentleman, and
not the lady responded; and these are
what Jones saw He concluded
to give it up the experim ent because there
were too many risks about it-especially
aste-risks.
There lives a widow out West who never
did anything useful until after her husband
died and left her a dozen chillren to take
/ care Of She thought great deal Of her
husband, but he did not leave her enough
subsistence to buy him a gravestone, and
/ this fact set her to work. She determined
that the poor mans grave should have a re-
[ spectacle mark. So she got a marble slab
end went to work on it, making grayestone
/ for the departed. Thus she begun to carve
out her fortune. She finished the work and
/ learned the trade a. a stone-cutter at the
same time. She soon did some other marble
work and offered it for sale 1t proved ac-
/ cepable, and she was given a permanent
| place in a narble-yard, and Is making
regular artisans wages and keeping her
/ family in good style. Sometimes husband
does turn out a benefit TO a woman, though
she may not realize his Use until she loses
/ him.
The Wheeling (W. Ya) IateAigeEoer con
/ tains the following story of superstition and
ignorance "On alley sixteen in East Wheel
Ing. a peculiar diseaseappeared among smaller
/ children. Seven babies, in as many differ
ent families. suffered from the same mysteri-
/ GUS complaint. One Of the babies died, and
/ it was thought the others would not survive
/ long No medical advice was called, as the
children were believed to be bewitched. An
old lady. however, who Is known TO possess
much influence with superstitious persons,
attempted 10 drive ont the evil spirits. She
visited the different families, and advised
them to keen every door looked, and stop uI
the keyholcs Nothing was TO be loaned
from a house for fear some bold and adyen-
tuous spirit would accompany the article
and make mischief in neighbor's family
The stocking on each child's foot was turned
inside out to spoil the enchautment and
many other ridiculous things were done
We have not learned what effect these pre-
scriptions have had on the little sufferers
but it seems horrible to think that innocent
children are compelled to suffer because O
the ignorance and superstition Of theii
parents"
"You will never lose anything by what 20,
have done for me, remarked grateful soldie'
who was conyalescing in government hos
pitaI. 10 a comrade who had attended hin
through a dangerous fever. Last week tina
comrade, Wm. X. Baight, cabinet make
residing in Mount Pleasant, Pa, received
official information that he was the sole hei
of {. r. Sykes, who left him $50 900 il
governments as a testamentary remembrance
of kindness to him while sick in a fever hos
pital near Washington.
Why do not our hotel keepers uniform tn
bell BOYS as i the custom abroad? As
rule, these servants in American hotels ar
about the dirtiest and most sloyenly lookin
lot Of human beings one would care to see
much less have wait upon them. lmpert
nence is bad enough, but when it IS assC
ciated with filth one is apt to become indig
nant.
: a gentleman was describing to Dougls
.Terrold the story of his cOurtship and marr
f ace-how his wife had been brought up
a convent and was on the point of takin
} the veil when his presence burst out on h
enraptured sight and she accepted him
5 her husband Jerrold listened to the er
, of the story, and then quietly remar
5 ed, L" She simply thought You better tbs
g nun.
5 A magnificent voice for calling cows is &
l the young farmers of Colorado require of
l wife in the way of music.
= Writing poetry for the waste-basket
/, saws an item maker, d" is putting ones 50
3. into words that burn" 1t is not so bad
that. and for the consolation of reject
rhvmers we hasten to say so. Very lit
waste paper is burned in this age of hi
/ rags. Sappho may be pleased to know th
-, her ill-fated Ms. is not 4" cremated' (hOr
. bic word y She Is not consumed-she
q e simply chopped or minced Qike meat
- hash) into little pieces; and her pref
- poem" comes out fair white paper up
~ which something of real value may be WI
= ten-a promissory note, maybe. or an invi
=, tion to dinner, which Is a great deal nj
a than all the - Lines to" in the wor
~ We mention this that the constructors
= stanzas nav not be discouraged when he
- of publication indefinitely deferred nal
~ their hearts unwell. They may think tn
a productions of no earthly value They
- mistaken. These sweet sheets have still
~ noble destiny. They may be tr,nsmogril
:: into fresh and beautiful cap, pot, lett
~ ~ packet note, commercial note, ladies' nc
Ne, &c. The materialist processes to
y, perfectly satisfied with his prospect of N
ing forever with the elements" 81
y perial Cesar, dead, and turn'd to cl
u. =. NAV stop hole to keep the wind ava,
" as the Lord Hamlet has it. Rejected yer.
ne which we cannot undertake to return, L
I, be sold fer price, and reappear in bl'
~ beauty in the shop of the stationer.
er Quite large party of the youtil of So
a Bend. Ind, who feel called upon to COM
au gate before the abode of every ewly-n
Al ried pair and conduct themselves like a
pol egation direct from the Internal reg ions,
ch assembled before the residence of Mrs.
ICY liam Defrees, on Wayne street, in that c
nd night or two ago. to 'bell'' her daug
off and Marshall C. UrGuhart, who had
he been married. The hideous serenade wa
as its widest, when the crowd, intent on n
rs ;no but the business in hand, was stampe