Middletown transcript., 1874-07-25
GNit and Aulllor.:
Paying for Luxuries.
THE WRONG MAN TIED TO THE WHIPPING
POST

y
rHE WRONG MAN TIED TO THE WHIPPING
POST.
Some years ago, one Ike Jewel, ma
Ave Of Vermont, picked up his traps, |
started off on peddling tramp, and final
ly brought up in Helena, State Of Arkan-
Bas.
Now it happened that OR the very day
Dir. Jewel arrived in town, fellow had
been arrested for negro stealing and plac-
cd in the old log Jail, preparatory to re-
sewing the penalty Of fifty lashes for the
efenee. The Jail being insecure there
was patrol a Ia Horse Guards to protect
i, aud the prisoner. having tinge of
Jack Shepherds blood in his veins, man
aged to escape, and Of course flew by
night, after the manner of the witches in
Macbeth The consequence was that
when the Sheriff went next morning, in
all the dignity Of official pride, to admin
lister the punishment. he was both sur
prised and indignant TO find his man non
est inrentas.
'-Ah. this won't do" said the diguitary
biting his lip, and looking poniards at the
Snder-shsritf, a carroty headed deputy,
with pumpkin-headed beard of weeks
growth 1--WE must set spies about for
him. and have him rs-apprehended at
once"
Scouts we're Immediately dispatched on
oil sides, all of whom had seen the man
on trial, aud knew his face, and as the
sheriff's ebenezer was hugely "riz," their
orders were ancompromisingly stringent
Nav II hoppopad from, Soma stronoo
and unfortunate cause, that the newly ar
rived peddler was the very image-the
regular "Corscan Brother" Siamese
tsin of tho fugitive culprit, and, as he
was buttering a pancake at breakfast next
morning large, strong man, with an Of
fei 4 grin, tapped him gently on the
shoulder.
"Well." said the Yankee, "what's the
row neow-eh 7"
II want you, Mister" the man briefly
replied.
"Ye-es-due you want me? s'pose
you have hearn' of my having cum tue
town with my everlastin' and all sortin'
inventions. You're wide awake see for
coming afore anyone else"
Course your Inventions" said the Of
fetal. The sheriff wants you immediate
ly You thought to escape us did you ?
"Sherif-eseapel Luke a-hcre, crit
tur, what on earth do you ?"
MEAN for you to come along with mo
without another word"
And so saying, he dragged the peddler
out of the room. On the way he learned
the circumstances of his arrest, and al
though he protested and swore he was not
the man, the likeness was too strong fol
belief
The sheriff advised him for the good oi
his country and the honor of his friends
if he had any, not to tell such 'dredfu
lics," but quietly submit to the punish
ment. The consequence was he was tiec
10 the whipping g-post, and the sheriff pre-
pared to render in the drearest manner
the infictien.
"Now. before begin, old fellow, sale
the sheriff, what have you got to say fol
yourself?"
"Oh, nothin' in particular" said tn,
peddlcr, laughing with meaning curv,
Of the lip, "only if you can afford to pay
for luxuries, mister, 60 ahead"
The sheriff did not comprehend tn
drift of this business-like assertion, ap
piled the scourge, aud with every cut tn
Yankee laughed with immoderate glee
Lash succeeded lash, and still he laughed
and still the wonder grew. When tn
6ftieth lash had been we'll laid on as
parting salute, the sheriff, in food o
wondermcnt, threw down his whip an
asked him the reason of his merriment.
"I'm regular dumfounded" said he
''what in the world makes you laug
so?'
Laugh! Why, who could help it ?
fairly roared the Yankee. "Pm laughiI
tue think how you've been sucked in th
operation-I amt the maa at all !"
He said this SO meaningly that th
sheriff began to think there must be
mistake somewhere. The Yankee COZ
tinued:
at strikes me that business in my lir
is goin' to be rayther dull in this tsowr
and eff there's any law tue be had L
spcckalate on this licking, and see eff
can't turn it to some account. I'm a
ways open for trade, mister, eff you wal
to compromise - for remember, you,
licked the wrong man"
And dearly did the sheriff pay for it.
MosEs's WIFE "A clerical gentlem,
L..u A. n.o,r... IL .Io..