The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1874-08-08

A pound of energy with an ounce Of tai
eut will achieve greater results than a
poand of talent with an ounce of energy.
Flirtatfoa is now neatly defined to be
attention without intention.
" Dung in years but an old eloper, is
i portion Of the description Of runaway
wife which was left by the deserted hus-
band at an Indianapolis police station.
Has it never occurred to us, when sur
rounded by SORROWS, that they may be
sent tc us only for our instruction, as we
darken the eyes Of birds when we wish to
teach them to sing
The golden moments in the stream Of
life rush past us, and We see nothing but
we stand the angels come to visit us, and
We only know them when they are gone
-Georgt Eliot.
The happiness of life may be greatly in
creased by small cnurtesies IN which there
is no parade, whose calm is too still to
tease, and which manifest themselves by
tender and atfectionate looks, and little
kind acts of attention
The scurrility of telling the truth is. &C
cording TO the judgment Of certain persons.
the gravest offence imaginable.
Many a true heart that would have
come back like dove u the ark, after its
first transgresslon, has been frightened be-
yond recall, by the savage charity of an
unforgivmg spirit.
certain sheriff. who was comely
young bachelor, served an attachment on
handsome widow. Madam, said he
with low bow, have an attachment
for You The lady hlushed, and limited
that the favor was reclprucated. You
don't understand me You must proceed
to court. know 1t Is leap year but |
prefer you to do the counting" Mad
am, this no time for trIfing the justice
Is waiting The Justice My
prefer the parson
Husband and wife who have fought the
world side by side, who have made common
stock of joy or SORROW, and grown aged to
gether, are not unfrequently found curl
onsly alike IN personal appearance, and IN
pitch and tone Of voice. He has gained
something feminine which brings his man
hood into full relief she has gained some
thing masculine which acts as foil t. her
womanhood.
II is BY sympathy we enter into the con
Germs of others, that We are moved as
they are moved, and are never suffered to
be indifferent spectators Of almost anything
men can do or suffer For sympathy may
be considered sort Of substitution by
which We are put into the place Of another
man, and affected As he is affected Burke.
An individual lately committed suicide
in Partisan hotel His headless body
was found IN his room, together with let
ter containing the following bewildering
statement | was bored, aud have killed
myself. Let no one be accused of my
death Do not look for my head have
hidden it myself in order not to be reeog-
nized.
One curious feature Of American prog
ress is the fact that this country consumes
as much ice as all the world besides. 1t is
also notable that dyspepsia is our national
disease. The Inference is easy that too
much ice water impedes digestion. There
can be and often n AS much incompetence
IN drinking water Is IN drinking whisky.
The Ornkey Herald gives an amusing
account If an mcid mt which occurred IN
the parish church Of Birsay some wears
ago During the singing OF the first psalm
waddled up the passage toward the puIplt
Just as the precentor had got out Of the
tune and almost came to a standstill-a
not very unusual occurrence at the time.
The minister, observing the goose leaned
over the side Of the pulpit, and addressing
the church officer, sand R, put.
out the goose The functionary not OBJ
serving the presence Of the fsathered par
lshloner and surprising the ministers d.
rectlon had reference to the precentor,
marched up to that individual, and to the
no small amusement of the meagre congre-
CATION, collard him, saying at the same
time, Come out o that, fallow
" Dad, said a hopeful sprig, chow
many fowls are there on the table I"
Why, said the old gentleman, as he
looked complacently on a pair Of finely
roasted chickens that we're standing on the
dinner table, why, my son, there are
two, p" Two replied the smartness,
there are three, sir, and I'll prove it.
"Three replied the old gentleman, who
was plain matter-of-fact man, and un-
derstuOd things as he saw them, " Id like
to see you prove that ? 9 Easily done,
sir easily done. Amt that one, laying
his knife on the first q Yes, that's GER
tain, said dad. And that's two. "
pointing to the second, 4" and don't one
and two make three :" Really, said |
the father, turning to the old lady, who
was In amazement at the immense learning
of her son, " really, wife, this boy is
genius and deserves to be encouraged for
1t. Here, old lady, do you take one fowl |
and Ill take the second, and John may |
have the third for his learning.
The Danbury Netcs man writes thus
from London "Our mixed liquors and |
slang are never-failing subjects Of interest |
to them from one vessel to the other, with |
the vessels as far apart az the hands can
be extended, and they don't understand it.
They ask me if there are such drinks as
brandy smashes, claret punches, gin sling,
and the like, and when l tell them am
not quite sure, but | think [ have heard |
such things mentioned by worldly people
in the States, they say, All, how wonder
tul They imagine that the universal
channel for the expression Of ideas is slang,
and repeat much that they have heard
which posses as much novelty me as it does
to them. They handle our slang about as
as they do our geography, and
IN this latter particular they never seem
TO realize that Canada is not somewhere
in the United States. They
call Michigan Michigan, Connecticut Con-
net ty-cut. But the name Of Chicago is
their chief hold. The terrible fire was
more rnerciful than are they. They CON-
placently denominate it Chi-ka-go, Chi
cog-O, Chee-agO, but the favorite render
my is She kaggy -