The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1874-12-31
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

AN agricultural fair; The farmers
daughter.
REASON often makes mistakes, b,:t con-
science never does.
TINE will only hang up his scythe
when he is no mower.
A COwARDLY soldier is like butter when
he runs before the fire.
A MAN with big nose isn't always
handsome, but he's nobby.
A MANS clothes are against him. espe-
cially if they are old clothes.
TAKEN as whole pill is a good
thing, but ii is bitter to chew
WHAT is that which by losing an eye
has only nose left? A noise.
To PRESERVE the unity of figures, car
pets should be kept in tackled.
He who can take advice is sometimes
superior to him who can give it.
Their is much pulling and hauling for
"A living in the dental profession.
Don't throw dust in your teachers
eyes. 1t will only inlure the pupil.
THE poems ON Autumn" are all in
Now for shy at winter.-BostoH Post.
HASTE makes waist. Young ladies
should linger over meals accordingly.
THERE are various stations in life, but
the least desirable is police station.
TALKING politics is business not
profitable enough to support family.
SLEIGHING dears at this season isn't
violation of the Game law in Vermont.
BEFORE taking liberties with "A strange
dog observe his tail and wait for the wag
IN.
\ QUEER old chap has nicknamed his
daughter Misery, because she loves com
pany.
WHAT carpenters implement does the
carpenter himself resemble? The screw
driver.
JEAN INGELow says that children re-
ceive the love of one generation and pay
ii to another"
\ CALIFORNIA orchard blOssomcd and
bore after being subjected To the heat of
Il great Conilagration.
THERE is no law against hutting ones
head against "A stone-wall, but as rule
the remuneration is small.
THE troublesome visitor who has been
shutting the doors after him all summer
now begins to leave them open.
\ RECENT gale lowered Detroit River
to a greater extent than was ever before
known, at least within the recollection
of old river men.
THERE is nothing to be so highly
priced as a soft, sweet voice in woman,
except her ability to take in washing
when hard times come
THE San Francisco Board of Brokers
consists of but eighty members and the
number cannot be increased. A seat
was recently sold for S20, 600
A FOOLISH old setting hen of jackson,
Tenn, abandoned her eggs, robbed an
old cat of its kittens, and is now cover
ing her ill-gotten and unnatural family.
A DENVER girl who had both arms and
one leg cut off by a locomotive little
over year ago plays Fl" tag" on one foot,
and hops around for hours at time
without sitting down
THE Atlanta Herdd is glad there is
prospect at last that the people of At
lanta will begin the use of the fractional
parts of a nickle Several stores have
adopted the practice of giving cents in
change to purchasers"
AN busy blowing and cannot enter
tain {. mpany now" is the substance of
"A note recently written by an Illinois
girl to St. Louis exquisite who had met
her at fashionable party in the latter
city and ,-'sheh ~ visit her at home
The maiden is a graduate OF an Illinois
seminary, and her father gave her an
eightyacre farm on condition that she
should help work it herself, which she
does.
AN old inebrate from the western por-
tion of the county, with "a well-trained
horse that understood perfectly the
habits and interests of its owner, came
to town one day last week and before
evening became beastly drunk, and was
found near TArlinson 4 Towards livery
stable stuck fast in the mud with his
faithful horse standing over him, and
upon an effort being made to rescue him
from his muddy bed the horse fought
manfully over the senseless body of his
-C0urter-JOu,ndL
WE once were acquainted with man
who had large hot legs of roasted NUT
ton every morning for his breakfast; and
what gigantic pi ceS de resistance he had
for his dinner only his cook and butcher
knew. When he bought turkeys he
bought two-one for himself and one for
his family No Emperor in the days of
the Roman deCadence ever ate more than |
this honest New England citizen, and he
lived to be eighty in spite of hot
sausages every night just before going
to bed. .-Neto York Tribune