The Grange advance., 1874-04-22

\ perfect. harmonious and happy
family represents society as it should be
on larger scale-a state-a natiun--a
government. In such family all is
just, equal, brotherly, sistcrly. no
shirking, no monopoly, no oppression ;
no favored ones, no dcadheads The
world at present, however, is /1uitc ait-
tcrent. Privileged classes, ryvcl on the
sweets Of productive toll. The yen'eel
professions are vampire mast exhaust
i've on the treasury Of the wor Mngulan.
But system Of love and phi]Mthropy
is destined to revolutionizc this state
OF things by tnliyhteniny the working
masses
Who are dcadheads? TO be one Of
that popular class is to get your cream
and sugar, your milk and honey. your
bread and fine clothes, free Ut cost
You have complimentary ticket to the
Worlds big Exposition: on the great
railroad and to all the comforts. con-
vcnicncies, beauties and pleasures Of
life. Isn't it charming and glorious
thus to become a favored specimen Of
humanity? You are then recognized
as fashionable and respectable, and be-
long to the upper ten. True, somebody
has to dig the dirt and turn the grind
stone, use the hoe and spade, and raise
the corn and wheat but then, wasn't
the clod-hopper class throughout the
earth made on purpose for that? So it
has been since the days of Cain.
make no allusion now to pilfering,
cheating, stealing, burglarizing, rob-
bing, swindling, salary-grabbing, en-
bezzling, dcfaulting, contiscating, or
extortion on small scale or on a gov
erRment big scale, for this is sometimes
slightly vulgar and criminal, and would
alone pay all the costs Of decent gov
ernment; but l mean the legitimate
rights Of the pure and innocent dead
head. That class have divine sanc-
tion.
Solomon was the wisest man that
ever lived, and Of course his claim was
undoubtedly good for seven hundred
wives and three hundred concubines,
with all the gold and silver needed for
his big temple. But those poor work.
ingmen who picked the stones for that
famous edi6ce, had no rights-neither
had their wives-that he was bound in
the least to respect.
David and Solomon were distin-
guished favorites of the old Bible times.
and most worthy examples for modern
deadhcads. So in our day VI have the
system perfected on a grand apd exten-
sive scale Of Democratic, Republican,
and Catholic, Protestant. orthodox evan
geical deadheadism- leaving )out the
extra wives-with schools to train and
qualify all nice young ladies and gentle
men aspiring for high positions.
Professional life is the universal at.
traction, which must be delicate and
refined, and most cxpensively accom-
plished. Nobody requires education to
grow potatoes, or push the plow, or do
any other productive labor. But if a
young man have comely features and a
pert mind, with some tongue and little
wit, it is quite clear that he was not
made for any common or useful pur-
pose, but for an ornament in polished
society. He must be deadhead. So.
ciety is adorned with many kinds Of
that genus homo. One can take his
choice according to his peculiar fitness.
If he possesses fair degree Of grace
and solemn sanctimony, he is all right
for the pulpit; if noisy, clustering elo-
quence, good politician if straight
bold figure, with proud military gait,
q fit candidate for West Point, and
epaulets. And so on. Society is sad
ly defective without these privileged
classes for trimmings-being quite as