The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1874-03-13

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bin II h. splmana Aitef the jai VII.
finished ~ male the following entry ii
hi+ aas.l'ecl tn repairing the Wa
10 Heaven. - feuis "
4 little Girl II eight n Ten snmmtts
being asked aha, tlnsl sas, replied
,ha, Il WAS uai with the juice inecaptl
uut,
\ bachelor rs,s IL ,au hand lad, a
newspaper with paragraph ,u' mi u
II, not live ii II will be real. hut
ever, hi. pf in.ercs. fell In the lnrer
u, the lady will ccnser IN inlinp ~.
what tue missing paragraph contained
For rnrc Eti, ana long. continued
patience you ought u ~ to Toledo a
young lady In ,ha. town has ren, 10
pieces of poetry TO a newspaper. and
though all have boon rejected. shc II
struggling with another.
Some men never lose their presence
II mind In Milwaukee last week. u
man threw his mothcr.in-law out ~ II
window In the nth story Of \ burning
building and carried feather bel down
stairs in hts arms,
Henry Will, after the death III Jane
Seymour. had some difficulty 10 yet
nnu,hcf wife. Ills lisst offer WINS ii tho
Duchess q Milan, but her answer was
TINT she had bn, ono head II she had
two, ono should bc al his service.
A butcher recently found . shawl-rin
In COW no was cutting up into steaks.
Il IL supposed tho animal had swallow
oil a milkmaid
A mnn was bonstIng that hc Ial boon
married for twenty years and bud never
given his wife cross word. Ih ~ who
know him say hc didn't dare 10.
Tho Rev. Gcorgo Hunt recently ro-
moved from Chatham. Ontario. aud act.
tod down al Pine Lake In the Willis 4.
Michigan. Tho circumstance would
hardly he worth mentioning, perhaps,
II, In the hurry and confusion Of start.
Ing. ho Ind not made tho lu,licruns mir.
takc u taking along Mr. Walter Hol..
inson's wifo and children instead ef ii-
own.
There arc two reasons why sumo poo.
rlc dpn't mind their own business.
Onc Ia that they hayen't my buAnoss.
and tho other l. that they haven't any
mind
A Peoria naturalist. IN atscmpting u
warm the oars II frozen wasp over q
gns jet, discovered tim. tho tall u thc
insect thawl oul first. and worked with
= rarility TINT waS N astonishing m .l'
hi,leons profanity u the naturalist. VII,
held the insect By tho tail while thus
experimenting,
Tho editor of Tho Troy VIVA askcd
his Satan, How many seruples thcr.
should be 10 q lraohm, and MI Tho it'll,
wretch answered was that nrithmcti,
wouldn't warm bis stomach In winter. I
Adam Ind nnc consolation when Ii,
fell. Fifteen Or twenty acquaintance
didn't stand On tho opposite uorne'
and laugh ~ his ,aishap.
A dog with two tails was scan II
Germantown tho other day One IN
longed To M TX. and WINS carried III Ill,
mouth Of tho canine.
A Sioux city hotel has hlnek MI,
TIM dog that killed thousand rats IN !
mon.h. This isa good pun for the dog
but ID hard Oh Tho hotel.
An exchange nays: Keep m ~
out far tho early resumption " pny
ment. " Both II our eyes are alrcad,
out looking for II, and - arr our II
bows
A boy WINS caught stealing chestnut
ncar cemetery. Whats yonr nan,ef
"Twced," blnbbered tho boy, III
frightened farmer dropped tho boy m
hed.
| A LADY Of tho aholdy arlstocrac.
found, IN returning from walk, som
cards on her table, Hhc called sersan
- $500 Il. - =. ..ls... ttt.Lm 1..tss