Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1874-07-10

Varieties. sn4a,5.7s
Short men always rise early; it is I'm
possible for them to lie long.
The residence of the late Sir Edward
Landseer was sold recently for G34, $50.
Coqucttes are like weathcrcocks-only
fixed when they become rusty.
Talk about the jaws of DEATH" said
henpecked husband-- they are moth
ing to the jaws of life
He who thinks too much of himself will
be apt to be forgotten by the rest of the
world.
1t is said that Henri Rochefort has re-
ccived an offer from England of eS,OOO to
establish a journal there
''Polo' just now seems to be the popu-
lar game in England. Princes OF the
blood play it, as well as the commoners
Philadelphia is to be made unhappy
again. Weston says he was we'll receiv-
ed there, and he proposes to go there again
soon. .r.....
"John, l wish it was as much the Gus
tom to sell wives rs it is to sell horses"
"Why so, Petery" I'D cheat somebody
shockingly before night" kr-
The people of Toulouse must be hard,
set. A writer, speaking Of the city, says:
1T is large town, containing 100 IN
habitants built entirely of brick"
The item that blacksmiths get clever
dollars per day and board in Arizona has
not had . tendency to start any of the
Philadelphia editors Westward.
The Vienna Choral Association of MaR.
Singers Mannergesangverein) have been
invited by the Mayor to visit Venice next
August, and have accepted the invitation.
Washington flies are bold and hungry
fellows. 1t was only the other day that
one of them disputed possession of a
strawberry with ii man, and kept up the
discussion until he swallowed them both.
There are two words that are intolera-
BILE to Frencilman. If you do not want
a scene you must not call man of the up
per classes g un miserable" or one of the
lower orders "cOclon."
A Maine man now sojourning in Odcss,e.
has cxhnmed Roman Emperor and his
legions, including several rusted stirrups
richly caparisoned mule, and case Of
raZOrs.
The Jardin des Plantes, at Paris, ha,
lately received two fine specimens of tht
orang-outang. The strangers come from
the island of Java. They are male anG
female and about the three years old.
Approximate homicide" is what the,
Brooklyn Eagle calls it when Il man fires
a pistol at another and misses. What is
it when the pistol is pointed playfully alta
person and doesn't so otf-but it always
does go Of.
Jennie" said one Irishman to anOtn-
er, the first time he saw steam engine
"what is that snorting baste?" shure /.
don't KNOW" was the reply "unless its
steamboat splurging for the wather."
"You must do little more work, Sam
dy," said an employer to u half-wit en-
gagged in making mortar. "Ay, ay,"was
the reply I'm jist as busy whin yer
AVA us whin yer no here" His employer
believed it.
A Paisley manufacturer got by accident
a severe cut across the nose, and having
no court-plaster at hand, stuck on his un.
fortunate organ one of his gum tickets. ON
which was the usual intimati0n, Wae
rantsd $50 yards lo.g
The marriage of the Princess Louises
eldest daughter of the King of the Bel
gians, with the Duke Philip of Saxony,
will take place at BRUSSELS toward the
last of August next. Great tstes will he
given to celebrate the event.
London fashiOnables have given up in
despair their endeavOrs in introduce Ger.
tain Russian styles to English society
They might have succeo ded in their efforts
but for the fact that the Grand Duchess
herself gave up the Russian fashions.
Tom Collins, of Bridgeport, Conn, has
the old f1intlock musket with which Gen
eral Putnam killed the wolf in the den Mt
Pomfret. Professor Hitchcock has tried
in vain to get it for the cabinet at AM
herst College, and Barnum for his show.
Victoria Woodruff is delivering her
lectures in San Francisco, and Tennie
Clatin is conducting u correspondence
with the mistress of house of i'll fame, and
tells her she I. C.) does not pretend to bo
any better than her correspondent.
A link boy asked the witty burgess if
he should light him homs. mo, child, y
said the Doctor Il am orc of the lights
of the world" II wish, then," replied
young impudencc, "you was hung up ut
the end of our alley, for We live in dcv-
ilish dark Onc."
Acadaverous, melancholy looking man,
in suit of thread hare clothes and hatt.S-
ed silk hat. excited considerable ateeation
by rising in the ladies cabin If Brook
lyn ferryboat and observing: There are
few red eyed widowA nowadays"
Plus IX, has come into fortune. The
late Cardinal Falcinelli left his property.
including jewels valned At O0,OtW francs
The Pope accepted these Jewels, but sent
to the two nephews Of the Cardinal tho
rest of tho Falcinelli property, valued ut
$500 francs.
"When first married was on my
knees before my husband fro.n morning
till night. 1t was perpetual 'doration.
an iacessant delirum, an ineA prcssible
bliss. shOwered carcsscs upon him l
could have eaten him"-" And now. ask
I'd friend. "-"rm sorry didn't"
The following is copy of a viii left
hy a man who chose to be his own law
yer This is the last will and testament
of me, John Thomas. I give all my
things to my relations, to be divided the
best way they can, N, B.--n any body
\ kicks up row, or makes any fuss about
it, he isLt to have apytAing:. Signed by
mc-Joln Thomas
A Cincinnati professor has demonstr--
ted that a man feels, just as satisfied after
lunching on a raw tarnip alone as II he
had feast. d at 4 kings table.