The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1874-08-20

to the fact that did not expect, when saw
her last, to be alive many days. That state~
ment stands connected with series of symp-
toms which I first experienced in 1856.
went through the Fremont campaign, speak,
ing in the open dir three hours at time,
three days in the week. On renewing my
literary abors felt must have given way
and very seriously thought that was go>
ing to have appoplexy or paralysis or some
thing of the kind. On two or three occa"
sion, while preaching, should lave fallen
to TIE pulpit if I had gnot held to tae table.
Very often came aear falling in the street
During the last fifteen years have gone into
the pulpit suppose one hundred times,
with very strong impression that should
never come out oft alive. Ihave preached
more sermons than any human being would
believe. when Ifelt all the while that whats
ever I had got to say to my people, Unjust
say it then, or I never would have another
chance to say it. HIhad consulted phys
.s ician his first advice would have been "You
must stop work." But I was in such situa'
ton that could not stop work. I read the best
medical books symptoms of nervous prostra-
ton and over-work and paralysis and formed my
own JuQgmenC Oh the case. Tle three points
marked were, must have good digestion, good
us sleep, and must go working These three
tE1ngs were to be reconciled, and in regard to my
diet and stimulants and medicines, made the
most thorough and searching trial; and as the
result, managed my body so that could get the
most work ont of it without essentially irnpairng
it. If had said word about this to my family
1t would have brought such distress and anxiety
on the part OF my wife as / could not bear. 1 have
for many years so steadily taxed my mind to the
# utmost that there have been periods when could
- not afford TO have people express sympathy with
me. 10 have my wife or friends anxious about
1t and showing 1t to would be just the drop too
much. In 1868 came again into the same
dition just before going to England, and 1t was
one OF those reasons why L willing to go.
The war was at Its height. carried my country
in my heart had the Independent in charge,
ana was working, preaching and occurring contin,
daily l knew / was likely to be Frustrated
again.
In December, $780, the sudden stock of these
troubles brought on again these symptoms in
more violent form. was very muCh depressed
in mind, and all the more because it one of
l was silent with everybody During the last four
years these symptoms had been repeatedly brought
on by my intense WORK carried forward on the
underlying basis Of so much sorrow and
trouble.
Ny friends will rear witness that in the pulpit
have very frequently alluded to my expectation Of
suddean death. feel that have more than once
already been near a stroke that would have killed
or paralyzed me- and carry with me now, as l
nave so often carried in years before this trouble
began, the daily thought Of death as door which
might open for me at any moment out Of all cares
T, IS. ana laDors into most welcome rest. 5i <...
as4 oal IN A STATE OF SUSPENSE AND DOUBT.
4 During the whole of the year 1871 I was kept in
state of suspense and doubt, not only for the
future Of the family for the reunion and happiness
ofwhich had striven so earnestly, but also as to
the degree which might personally be subject to
attack and misconstruction, and the trouble
be brought into the church and magnifed by pub
icity. The officers of the church sought to inves
tigate Mr.. Titon's religious views an moral con-
duct, and on the latter point had been deceived
into a belief that he not in fault. AS to the
religious views, still hoped for a change for t he
better, as it was proposed to drop him from the
list of members for non-attendance, and as he as
serted to me his withdrawal, this might have been
done, but his wife still attended the church and
hoped for his restoration. recollect having with
him q conversation, in which he dimy ntimated
to me that he thought it not unlikely that he might
60 back into his old position. He seemed 10 be in
mood to regret the past. And so, when was
urged by the Examining Committee TO take some
steps, said I am not without hopes that by pa
tienCe and kindness Tilton will come back again
into his old cburca work. and be one OF us again
L therefore delayed q decision upon this point for
long time, Many of our members were anxious
and impatient, and there were many tokens Of
trouble from this quarter. Meanwhile, one wing
OF the Female Suffrage Party had got hold of the
story in a distorted and exaggerated firm, such hs
had never been lntimated to me by MIR. Tilton or
mis- friends. did not then suspect what now
know-that these atrociously false rumors or:gi-
mated with Mr. Tilton hinaelf. 1 only saw the
evil growing instead Of diminishing, and perceived
that while was pledged to silence and there fore
could not speak in my own defeLse some one was
forever perseveriDg in fasehood, growing contin.
ualy in dimensions, and these difficulties were
Immediately increased by the utilization Of Ny.
Tilton with the Woodruff clique.
MRS. wooDHULL's CONNECTION WITH THE SCANDAL.
In May, 1871, Mrs. Woodruff advertised forth
coming article shadowiug an account of the dig
turbance in Mr.. Tiltons family, but without using
names. 1t was delayed ostensibly by Mr. Tilton's
influence with Mrs. Woodruff, until Nov embcr
1872. During this suspension of her publication
she became the heroine Of Mr.. Moulton and Mr.
fllton. She was made welcome to both houses,
with the liberation, but not the cordial consent Of
their wives heard the most extravagant eulo-
giles upon her. she was represented as a genius
born and reared among rude Influences but on ly
needed TO be surrounded by refined society to show
noble and commanding nature. did not know
much about her; and, though my impses Aons were
unfaVorable- her real character was not then re-
ally known to the world--I met her three times.
At the frst interview she gracious, at the sec
ond abe was cold and naughty, but at the third
she was angry and threatening, for had per-
eptorily refused preside at the lecture she was
about to give at Steinway Hail. The mos siren
ssuous efforts had beer made by both Mr. T1lton and
' Mr. Moulton to iaduce me to preside at this lec>
&4s. with Mrs