The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1874-06-18
FLIRTs AND FILTRATION.


FLIRTS AND FILTRATION.
But am afraid she is a great iirt. .
g Yes but not half as bad as he is"
These two remarks I-couid not help
overhearing the other day in the crow,
and very strong desire came over me
to politely accost the authors-two
nice-loOking, gentlemanly persons-and
ask them if they would kindly favor
me with definition of the word "firt.
do not believe that there is any word
in the English language which has a
less distinct meaning and conveys such
different impressions to different
minds. You sit next to a lively and
amusing young lady at dinner, and
find that her conversational powers, if
not vastly intellectual, are at all events
quick, and as there is a considerable
freshness and some amount of origin
ality in her remarks, you talk the whole
Of dinner time, and are not unwilling
to renew the conversation when you
meet in the drawing-roo afterwards.
After your fair young friend, to whom
perhaps you are principally indebted
for having spent very pleasant even.
ing, has been carried home by her
mamma, you casually remark to your
AaboANnrg 14Oh NGA aBLGGdDA0 ALASb
Dash Is. Whereupon madam rejoins,
"Oh yes, she is very vivacious, but I
fear she is a sad fiirt." Anything but
sad. you said to yourself "but how,
fjTt? In what way does that indefn-
able word apply to the charming Miss
Dash ?" You recollect that at ball two
or three nights ago you were introduced
to Miss. Blank, and your friend who in
troduced you warned you previously
that she was "an awful fiirt, you
know" Well, vou find that Miss Blank
had a way of leaning very heavily on
your arm, looking up dreamily into
our eyes before she answered the most
commonplace remark, and holding your
hand with almost masculine grasp when
waltzing or, should you be the sharer
of her tolls through the Lancers, you
discovered that she had a habit of
greeting you with q smile and a shake
of the hand whenever you met her in
the last figure of that may dance.
Her conversational powers you soon be-
come aware, were limited. She ap-
peared to think it to be her meek duty
to hang upon your words with fasci-
mating gaze-if / may use such an ex-
pression-and to look as if she invested
every triding remark you made with a
sublime dignity far beyond the occasion.
True, she never seemed in a hurry to
be taken to her cbdDe one, and pos
sessed wonderful faculties for imbibing
tea and lounging in a quiet corner till
her next partner discovered her, and If
she was not engaged for the next dance
she evidently expected you to sit it
out " with her. But her behavior has
not assisted you towards the informa-
tion you thirst for as to the meaning of
the term " fliFt, " for, as far as you can
divine her character, proverbially gal
liant as you are, you cannot resist the
that IN Miss Blanks case
hirt is only another word for bore,
and hirt is certainly the prettier ex-
prerssion of the two. On another occa-
sion-say at picnic or in grand stand
you find yourself next to Mrs. Three
stars, who is apparently eight and
twenty, or theTeabouts, and who has, to
your knowledge, four or five charming
children (supposing, of course, that
You allow that child en- ever can be
eharming), and whose lively rattle and
5 raceful manners compel you to con-
fess as You dress for dinner that you
have really passed a much more pleas
ant day than you had anticipated. In
the course of dinner, while you are
silently wishing that Mrs. Threestars
were sitting beside you instead of the
inane beauty or dull old dowager to
whom the exigencies of "going down
to dinner" have allotted you, you hear
the name of the lady you are thinking
of mentioned. Somebody-some kind
soul who never would say an unkind
word, except from a sheer sense of
duty-iustantly remarks: "Ob, yes
she is very nice, but am afraid she is
n dreadful fiirt." Again that incompre-
hensible word. It seem TO be like the
rain which falls upon the just and the
unjust. The notion of Mrs. Threestars
and Miss Blank being joined in the
same category. What can it all mean ?
You turn to the dowager by your side
and say /:
"Do you know Mrs. Threestars, Mrs,
Proper p
Mrs. Proper Canning herselD-"I
am acquainted with her, yes"
You I have met her. She seems
to me to be very entertaining.
Mrs. Propper-"I believe she is a
great favorite with gentlemen"
You Not with ladies ."
Mrs. Proper" Well, you see, there
are certain men whom you call dispar-
agingly ladies' men and so 1 suppose
there are ladies who are-whO are
You-(savagely determining not to
help her out)-'WhO are what"
Mrs. Proper" Don't you under
stand ? Well-more at home in mems
society than in women's.
Yon-"Ah And is that the meaning
of the word fiirt which / heard just
now applied to our friend Mrs. Three
stars ?"
Mrs. Proper Perhaps it is"
You Then we men ought TO feel
deeply indebted to fiirts, and highly
honored by their preference. sincere
ly hope thai you are fiirt, Mrs. Prop
per"
You say this with an innocent look
and a genial laugh, and Mrs. Proper,
so far from regarding you as an lmpru-
dent Young man, is evidently much
pleased with you begins to ia k to You
volubly, having hitherto somewhat dis
regarded you; and you are quite salts
fiei that as far as you understand the
word, AIRS. Proper is quite as worthy
the name of hirt as Mrs. Threestars or
Miss Black herself. So You 90 on, en-
deavering by an exhaustive process OF
experimental inquiries to find out the
di6ereRtid of the species of fiirt.
1t may be said that the only person
who has ever succeeded in accurately
describing a hirt is Mr.. Tennyson in his
poem Lady Clara We're de We're.
But then she was firt of a truly por-
tentous type her pastime was put an
end to by the coarse suicide of an ,ex-
cellent youth, and she laid herself open