Litchfield enquirer., 1874-04-16
CLIPPINGS.

A marriage on Q railway train may properly be termed railroad tie.
 Queston.-What was Joan of Arc made ofS AnsVer.-She was Maid of Orleans, Cotton sheets and newspaper sheets are. alike Tn this respect because great many lie in them.
 A Danbury, liquor dealer offer Q chro- mo to all who get tight exclusively in his saloon.
 A St. Louis woman has lately ordered, among other ''fggers" from Rome. cone marble fgger of Apoller."
 An old lady advises young girls who want to remember thing, to write it down and paste it on the looking glass.
 A Western Granger has written to his Representative for some Mardi Gras seed, and he will have it, he says, frank ing or no franking.
 Danbury people were awakened Satur- day morning by the singing of birds and the rasplng of snow shovels on the pave ment.
 There is a time for all things. The time for a boy to run away from school and go fishing, is when his folks have company to tea.-D. ~. There are young men who cannot hold skeln of yarn for their mothers without wlnclng, but will hold one hundred and twenty-five pounds for aneighboring fam lily, for the best part of night.
 A quarrelsome couple were discussing the subjects of epitaphs and tombstones. and the husbaud said My dear, what kind of a stone do you suppose they will give mo when I die?" Birthstone, my love, was the affectionate reply.
 A newly married lady hid a toy snake Ill her husbands boots. The husband, on discovering the reptile, first took a critical look at himself in the mirror. and then, going to closet, seized his demi- John, and threw it far out into a neigbor- ing pond.
 The World is so elated by the demo- cratic victory that it returns to it's old habit of speaking of negroes as Triggers" fhe defeat was pretty bad one, but hardly Justities such imprudent insults as that
 Mrs. Malaprop has no patience with the people who want women to have votes. She declares that, for herself, her nerves would never bear the shock of hay ing anything to do with the electrical | franchise D
 The parents of young man who was killed at Columbia, have placed a monu- ment over his remains with this inscrip- tlon: Escaped the bullets of the ene- my to be assassinated by cowardly pup "a kind husband, affectionate father"
 Speaking of the half-naked statue of Washington, which cost $50, 900, in the East Capitol Park, D. O., Grace Green wood says that his outstretched arm points responsibility toward those glass cases in the Patent Office, where hang his much desired habilments.
 A naughty little boy, blubbering be- cause his mother wouldn't let him go down to the river on the Sabbath, upon being admonished, said: 1T didn't want to go swimmin' with 'em, ma. I only wanted to go down to see the bad little boys drown for going in a-swimmin' on Q Sunday"
 A prominent Danbury merchant princes horse ran away without leave last Friday evening, during temporary alteration No damage-the animal was careful beast and appreciated the strengthened circumstances of his master.
 A stump orator out West, wishing to describe his opponent as a soulless man, did 1t in this wise: "I have heard" said he, ''some persons hold to the opinion that, just at the precise instant after one human being dies. anoth CT is born, and that the soul of the deceased enters and animates the newborn babe Now have made particular and extensive in- quiries concerning my opponent there, and l find that for some hours previous to his nativity nobody died"