Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1873-10-02
agricultural.
Keeping a Cow.

The man across the way who enjoyed
vegetables fresh from his own garden
through the summer has bought a COW
His wife told him how nice it would be to
have COW on the premises 20 rs To have
milk fresh every day, and always in time.
and always in abundance Then
make butter themselves. and HOT eat the
rank stuff out of the store. She told him
there was enough stun from the garden
and stable to almost keep the COW. and the
product would be almost clear gain. lie
figured ii up himself with a pencil. and the
result surprised him. He wondered why
he had not kept a COW before. and inward
~ condemned himself for the loss he had
been inticting upon himself. Then b"
bought COW. In the evening OF its arri-
val he went out To milk it, But the
animal was excited by the strange sur
roundings. and stepped on our friend. and
Kicked over his pail, and nearly knocked
one OF his eyes ont with her tail lie
worked at the experience for an hour, but
without any success. Then his wife came
out 10 give advice, and his son came out to
see the fun. The COW put one finer heels
through the woman's dress. and knocked
the boy down in the mud, which ended
their interest in the matter. One OF the
neishbors MIXED the animal that night.
and came round the next morning and
showed the man how to do it,
The third day the COW escaped the sur
VIGILANCE OF the boy who was lett to watch
her, and when the man came home at
night. she was nowhere to be found The
boy had also disappeared and our neigh
Dor found he was obliged to hunt her up
before supper. lie walked round for
while, and then returned home, but the
animal had not been seen. Then he went
of again and made a very thorough
search. and about ten O'Clock that night
he returned with the COW. his clothes be-
grimed with perspiration and dust. Ind his
face flushed and scratched. He wanted to
kick the animals ribs in. but realizing that
such course would result in pecuniary
damage. he changed his mind. The boy
wished he had obeyed the first impulse
On the fourth day they churned, so as to
have fresh butter for the table. The moth
er took hold of the dasher first, because
she said she used to DO it when girl. and
liked no better sport. She pounded away
until she caught the crick in the back that
doubled her up like knife. and then she
put her heir TO it. He had been standing
around, eagerly waiting for a chance and
grumbling becsuse he did not get IT, and
when the dasher was placed in his hand
he was SO happy he could hardly contain
himself. lie pumped away far an hour at
il; then he said if he had to do so any
more he would run away and be a robber.
At noon the man came home and learn
ed the situation. lie was little disguised
at the '.tomfoolery." as he called il. and
took hold of the churn for himself and
made il bounce for awhile. Then his
stomach began to fall in, and his spine TO
unjoint. and his shoulders to unloosen.
He stopped and wiped of the perspiration.
and looked around with melancholy cast
to Lis features, and went al it again. The
butter didn't come, however. but every
thing in the way OF oratorical effect did.
He got SO dreadfully excited that his wife,
smelling strong OF eamphor, took the
dasher away from him, and went TO work
herself. At this the son put his hat under
his jacket, and miracously disappeared.
Later in the day the milk was poured around
the grape vine. On the fifth day the COW
knocked down a length of fence to the
next lot, and ate all the oranges from a
tree that stood in tub, aud when the peo-
pie attempted to drive her out, she carried
away a new ivy on her horns. knocked
down a valuable vase of flowers and cap
ped the climax by stumbling over box of
MOSES, and falling on pile of hOt-house
frames. On the sixth day our neighbOr
sold his COW to a butcher. and now eats
strong butter which comes from the store.
i Danbury Necs.