Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1873-02-23
MELANGE.
The nick of time-Wrinkles.

The nick of time Wrinkles.
"A word to the wise-Keep so.
-Au outward-bound bark-A dogs.
"A Hartford man adveItises for an heir.
"A burning shame-A wax candle
(scandal.)
Iowa keeps warm with $4,000 bushels
of corn day.
A brother Of the poet Keats lives in
Louisville, Ky.
The eight wealthiest men in New Or
leans are retired butchers.
"A Halifax woman summoned the cor
oner to sit ON her dead cat.
Utica people are accused of wearing
snow ploughs for oVershoes.
-"You're a man after my own heart"
as the cook said when she let her beau in
at the back gate.
After searching a mans pockets and
promising not to say anything about it, a
ST. Louis youth let his man off and stopped
playing policeman.
Among the saddest episodes in the
late storm In Minnesota was the freezing OF
the hands, nose, forehead, everything except
the cheek, OF life insurance agent.
An absent-minded Danbury lady, on
Monday, tied bed quit she had just
washed, in a rocker In front of the stove,
and. pinned her baby to the clothes-line.
The Auburn, N. Y, Ne,oS says: San
ma Dickinson is engaged to be married to
Whitelaw Red. Authority-her brother,
who told our informant. Anna should
keep that brother at home"
The winds getting round, remarked
Bibbs to his friend Buggins, the other day,
when it changed from east to west. "Glad
of it," replied Buggins, otis been sharp
long enough"
"A bright six year old Nashville boy,
living on high street, is philosopher in his
way. He says he don't care cent for the
girls and that be don't intend to have
wife, when he grows up, to bother him
about money.
Last evening there was lack of water
in the wash-room of the Maxwell for short
time. A funny chap who was Industrious
ly striving TO remove the real estate from
his countenarcs with about half pint of
water, exclaimed, "Well, thank Heaven,
Pm nota life insurance or sewing machine
fgent. If were, this wouldn't be water
enough to dampen my cheek"
"A friend of ours, whenever he wishes
to remedy anything particularly in the
morning, always turns a photograph face
to the wall before retiring, and usually
spends the greater part of next day ponder
ing over the problem what the mischief it
was he wanted TO remember.
A Nashville parent was reading aloud to
bis family a highly complimentary
notice of "an accomplished young
lady," of this vicinity. accomplish
ed young lady" interrupted one of bis small
olive branches. sit don't take much to be
accomplished Their, know her, and she
says Il havn't saw and 4 SEEM"
"A German Psychologist has discovered
that tobacco smoking by boys "interferes
with the molecular changes coincident with
development of tissues, and makes the blood
corpuscles oval and irregular at the edge"
Any parent can thus ascertain if bis boy
smokes BY merely taking out handful of
his blood corpusGes and observing their
edges.
"A lovely Nashville girl graduated not
long since, and read, on that eventual day,
q composition which was universally adj
mired by those present. The young lady
received the praise bestowed upon her lit
erary effort in charming manner-blush-
ing ''like the red, red rose," and entirely
in the confusion of the moment,
to mention the trifing fact that one portion
of the composition had been written for her
by friend in Arkansas, and the remainder
by another in Texas.
"A Titusyille father, who sold his oil
before hard times struck the region, and
who has quartette of beautiful daughters,
has worn out the toes of four pairs of
boots this winter, helping the young men
down the icy steps of his residence who
have called to chat with the girls.
One of the members of the House says
be don't think as much of Speaker Nc
Gaughey as be did when he used his infu-
snce to elect him to his present position.
Said he: "The other day moved to lay
bill on the table; the motion was voted
down, and McGaughey wouldn't table the
bill" The same gentleman confdentially
explained to q friend a few days
since that there was ''s heap of this dam-
roolery' which be didn'tyeHdorse.
The "Preachings and Personalities
nan, of the St. Louis Journal, borrowed
IN opera glass of newly made acquaint-
snce, the other night, put on his absent
DOM mates best clothes, procured dead
iead ticket, and hied him away TO the OPP
IRA. He had but fairly taken his seat, and
vas busily engaged in looking at the young
aides with his borrowed telescope, when a
ovely woman, who had just expended $50
IN ga duck of a bonnet" of fashionable
,tyle and dimensions, came tripping in and
ook seat directly in front OF the man of
he pencil. OF course that fashionable hat
completely hid the stage from vieI-that's
what they're for-and simply because it
fulfilled its mission on earth, that selfish
md unreasonable man went home and
wrote as follows, namely, to-wit: ave
wish to state, for thu benefit of the ladies,
he theological fact that those who in this
world occupy front seats at concerts and
operas, wearing high hats, shutting out the
view from those in the rear, will not occupy
ront seats in the world to come"
81, ind