Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1873-04-10
WHOLE NO. 1902
Tale of PantaI0Ons.

A Davenport legal gentleman went
out one evening recently to have q
quiet game of billiards. He stuck to
his cue for several faithful hours, con-
vivialized with his friends still longer,
and then went home. On retiring to
rest he was most singularly uneasy,
and tossed about for some time with
out dropping into that peaceful slum.
ber we usually derive from clear con-
science. His lady was annoyed, and
complained kindly. 1t was no use,
however something drove sleep from
his eyelids. At this juncture his lady
was taken suddenly i'll chow fortunate
that he was awake y and he was ap-
pealcd to to hasten off to the nearest
drug store in quest Of a restorative
He hastily attired himsely, double
quicked down the street, rushed into a
store, obtained the article so urgently
required, and produced his pocket
book. Great Caesar! what had trans
pired L? He had never seen that wal
let before and the pants were not his
own, Could it be possible he was in
his right mind Was it not rather
all distempered dream? He resolv-
ed to see, and without stopping to
take the remedy with him, he rushed
back to the wife of his bosom. He
did not flourish a revolver, he did not
smash furniture, he did not strike at
titudes like a gladiator-he simply
took part in the following conversa-
ton:
"Jane ?"
eyes, dear
'How are you feeling?"
"Better Much better. I think a
good sleep is all | now need. How
kind of you to go to so much trouble"
every kind, wasn't it ?"
every kind, honey
"Jane, shall turn on the GAS ?'
eff you like, dear
The gas was turned on.
Jane ?"
eyes, dear"
"Do these look like my pantaloons?'
"Why, what can you mean, dear ?"
81 mean, do these resemble the trou-
sers | wore home this evening ?"
"Why how can I tell, dear ?" and
Jane raised up with some surprise and
reluctance, gave quck glance, and
screamed outright.
"Husband," said she, with some en-
barrassment. 'you've made a ridicul
GUS mistake somewhere while out with
your friends. What in the world have
you been doing tonight ?"
''That's rather thin, Jane. We
don't usually take off our pants to play
billiards.. When | went to bed to-
night | laid my proper pantaloons on
that there chair. When | dressed to
go out, the pair I have on first fell in
my way. put them on. l discover
ed at the store they were not mine
| returned at once, and now | find the
pair left on the chair are missing
Jane began to sob, weep, and pro-
test her innocence, while the husband
paced the floor in deep reflection.
"Jane," at last he said, Il guess you
can so home to your parents to-mor-
row. You and l have gotten along
very we'll for year or two, but the
things played"
And down stairs he went with a
deafear to the frenzied appeals and
prayers she showered after him. An
investigation on the morrow disclosed
the fact that the mysteriously procur-
ed pantaloons contained just $500
more than the pair that had so mys-
teriously walked off. Jane left on the
first train for her Illinois home. A
bill of divorce had been filed, and no
one has called to exchange pantaloons
and pocket books.-Rock Island Cor.
Chicago Journal.
"A writer in the Country Gentle
-. l.nf A.