The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1873-10-24
ODDS AND ENDS.

a bridal procession in Milwaukee
was four hours passing given point
The point was saloon.
Define honesty +? The wag Of a
dogs tale.
A good wife--a silent partner.
Vice makes man cunning, and
virtue makes him wise.
Define twins 2 much.
False praise is the worse kind Of
Islander, yet some people in Mariet-
ia get mad because we do not say
they sing well.
Diogoneze hunted in the da time
for honest man with a lantern il
he had lived in these tines, he
would hav needed the he'd lite ov a
lokomotiil. Billings.
lie who suspects everybody,
should be watched by everybody.
We are struggling against the
world, the flesh and the devil. We
have the World for an exchange, a
man by the name Of Flesh is our adj
vertising agent, and the Devil makes
it hot for us between our sanctum
and the composing room, shrieklng
for copy.
"Papa," said a young hopeful,
what is punctuation 2" 1t is the
art of putting stops, my child
"Then / wish you'd go down into
the cellar and punctuate the beer
barrel, as the ale is running all over
the floor
A western stump orator, in one of
his speeches remarked "GentIe-
men, if the Pacific Ocean was an
inkstand and the whole clouded can
opy of heaven and the level ground
Of our earth was sheet of paper, |
couldn't begin to write my love o!
country on 20 it."
"Who is your favorite preacher Y
asked one man of another. "Why,
like to hear Mr.. - preach best
for | don't like preaching anyhow
and his comes nearest to nothing o
any that ] ever heard"
Our hardware dealers say tina
they are selling more gate-hinge
than any other article now, and wer
it not for the briskness in this par
of their business, times would b
very dull. They expect the dc
mand to be good so long as these fin
evenings for outside courtship con
tinue.
THE Shah of.Persia says he woul
like to have couple of America
women to complete the re organiza
ton Of his little family. Send hin
Vic. Woodruff and Suse Anthony
That will be enough harem>scare
'em to satisfy him for the remainde
of his days.
Would you rather an elephan
killed you or a gorilla Rather tn
elephant killed the gorilla.
When has a man a right to scol,
his wife about coffee 7 When h
has more than sufficient grounds,
Are you guilty or not guilty
asked Judge of a prisoner the 9th
cr day. An sure now, eaid Pat
what are you put there for but t
find that out
A wag aue evening pulled dow
a turner's sign and put it over
| lawyers door; in the morning
read, "All sorts of turning an
twisting done here
A Galena man went to the GENE
terry, dug up his fathers graye>s'on
and offered it for sale to marbl
cutter. The Gazette triumphant,
adds as challenge to the world
''bring on your mean men y
An exchange says: "A hustle i
visible in every kind of business. y
We were not aware before that wo
man monopolized every kind Of bus
mess, or that business was of th'
feminine gender; but if it Is not
what business has it with hustle I
Whenever you see young man
hanging around a korner grocery
and drinkin cent gin every time
he kan git ennyboddy tew ask him,
yu kan make up yure mind that he
has been unanimously nomernatiC
for the siait prizon, and will proba'
bly, sit his elekshun.-B Billings.
II is singular what little thing
will pat man out. A Jersey City
lawyer was making a high flows
speech the other day, telling abou
angels tears, when his Honor said
"Conine your remarks TO the DO: