New Orleans Republican., 1873-07-20
"Early RisinG'' Experiences.
early to bed and early to rise,
Is the way to be healthy, wealthy an

Reader. there was actually time when
believed in those lines-when I thought
those lines contained about as much wisdom
as could readily oe compressed in 80 small
a space. "Franklin', l argued. twas q great
mana good man. When Franklin says a
thing, therefore, lieTe il. want to be
healthy: want to be wealthy; | want to
be wise. Here Franklin gives me a recipe
for becoming ali three. All I've got to do
is to follow MS advice. will do it. Aud
did"
Or. rather. !! should say, followed the
FIRST part strictly and 10 the letter. found
no Lifficu.tv IN that. l could 90 to bed as
fail a. once into the sweet refreshing slum-
Der winch only spotless conscience
can bestOw: Dut l found i. difficult
Il found it ;mpoasibe-to get UP early.
The spir;. was willing. buc she flesh was
weak tthat's quotation from Scripture
I'm very prouu o. my Scriptura! know!
edge. am. and ;t seemed to NE as il the
carrie: went 10 bed the later l arose; 80
that some ines. when went to bed before
sunset. would tind il was near noon when
awoke next morning. 1t would tire thee,
gentle reader. 70 euumerate al. the expert
,neuts which | had recourse to, 70 wake me
from my slumbers. l invested in an alarm
clock. which emitted screecb that in my
waking hour. couldn't listen to
without shudder. had springs
and ratties without number and
above all. had hide0us machine which
was warranted 70 wake Rip Van Winkle."
and which svused q buckettul of water over
me at the hour when I wished to get up.
But all in vaiH. The alarm-clock screeched
at ,he appointed time. and dreamed that
y ModoC iHdian was scaiplng me. while he
!uiled NE to rest with a war-whOop; the
springs sprang. the rattles ratified, and
dreamed that was stuck fast in swamp,
with cloud OF gnats and mosquitoes and
horsehes and bumbie-bees buzzing round
nv ears: the water sOused down on me,
and dreamed that l was out in rain
storm and my umbrella was leakiDg-but l
never awoke.
At last began 20 ge. discouraged. be-
gan to tear that health. wealth and wisdom
were totally out Of my reach. ltreuuented
all .he city libraries. and read all the books
Snd al. the ma gaz!ne articles on the sub
ice: OF Sleep and Early RisingI could lay
my hands on. in the hope of finding some
thing to assist me in my quandary. At
last l was successful. In some old, Dut-Ot-
| the-wav corner lit upon musty old tome,
| in which | found described an eXpedlent to
which the Hiuioo courier is said to resort
when he sinks TO rest upon journey and
| doesn't wisi: 20 sleep for 200 great length
| of time. He ties 70 his foot one end Of a
string of tow. prepared for the purpose, and
| then ignites the other. The fire takes some
time to reach his person, but when it does,
| the smart OF the burn wakes him mp at
| once. and '.he proceeds on hi. Journey with
| great alacrity," I quote from the book
l couldn't nave hit on anything better
| suited to my temperament. True, there
was some danger IN ii: but my manly bosom
| laughed at danger. Besides, determined
to manage in such way that all danger
| would he avoided. This is how managed
| it: suffered my !egs-beg pardon tor the
| press i,-l suffered my legs to prOtrude
about foot from the bed, and then tied
| the tow to my toe II declare. that's pun !.
amt it. and might have made another
| abou: foot" if | had only been smart
enough, and place the tow in tin pan
beneath. and ignited it. Then slept the
sleep of the just dreamed that was =
| Hindoo courier. and that l was running
away from "a prairie on fire. which was fast
| gaining on me. Onward sped. as fast AS
my wearied, aching limbs would permit.
| Onward. sti.! onward. till at last. breath
| .ess. tel. upon tho plain, perfectly ex-
hausteG.
On came tie devcurin. element fine ex-
preston. ;hat-Orisin too, howlin. and
cracking. in its fearful .!ee. till l felt its
scorchin. breath upon me. l was burning!
| writhed ii anguish. screamed for sue
cor. though knew that suecor was imlos.
sible: and d. last awohe to find i, not a.
dream. !,ut a dread. an awful reality. HOr-
ror Of horrors! My bed was in flames! !!
Brave: Good! BIZ George, tina. descrip.
ton - capital. I'm a great, a sublime
writer. Why. as look back upon what
have Just written I'm fairly astonished at
my owH genius. doubt not, reader, that
your blood is already curdling in your
veins. Tie description is so vivid that you
can see the fire yourself; you can smell the
smoke: nay. YOUR very hair is singed.
Blu. proceed; there's some even better writ
ing in store 10: you). The truth burst upon
n" at once.
siv PRECAUTIONS had teen IN vain:
The tow ha,i set the bed on fire.
spraEg to My feet and rushed to the
door
Heavens: 1t was locked:
tumbied tOr the key.
l Ihad mislaid it somewhere.
1t was not to be found:
tThe above is the French style Of writing,
and is very nne. in its wav-it Isl
There was no :ime TO be lost: sieZed
some 6edcIothes, tied them together, and.
firmly attaching one end to the window
sill. Ie: myself slide down: A cry of terror
rose 10 my lips when l reached the end of
the rope and found myself still! some fifteen
feet from the ground:
Imagine my situation, midway between
heaven and earth, unable either to ascend
or descend. howling with alright. yet still
!.rasping the bed clothes with tenacious
grip. 1t was deep midnight, and my fear
tul screams rose upon the STILL solemn
scene Ike those of demon in despair,
startling each neighboring rock into an
echo. Now the flames began to burst from
the roof. lighting up the whole country
round with "a lurid and titful glare. What
if they reached the rope before assistance
could arrive. The thought sckcned me.
and my shrieks for mercy rose with tenfold
violence. At last heard footsteps: then a
ladder placed against the wall: and, just as
NV enfeebleh hands were about to release
their hold on the rOpe | fell faiHting into
the strong arms Of a neighbor.
Health. wealth and wisdom. forsoOth :!
As 20 health. | caught a rheumatism from
exposure, that night, which has deprived
me Of the use of my limbs. AS 10 wealth.
my house and effects were totally destroyed;
the insurance company refused to refund
me their worth: and r,linous lawsuit
which brought against them, and which
was decided against me, left me a pauper,
dependent on the charity OF my relations
And as TO wisGoin-well. yes Il own | am
II gamer there. I'm wise enough. now, to
know that Franklin was iunatic and early
ri-in. Ar imposture.
Vienna and Berlin.
,v..a:r II. R.ssel's Correspond. nee il: New York
Times
Vienna can not shake Gi: the impress Of
antiquity. She has pulled down her walls,
ieveleG her glaces. tlleu her lnoats. made
her roU.l, places smooth. Haussilanlzed a
spick and span new stadt .. !ntevinIna Die
streets. lined i.y stately mansions, even put