Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1873-09-05

HE GOES FOR THE ORANGES.

Mr.. Nasty Embarks in New Enterprise
lie Locates In Illinois and is Metamorpho-
sed into Hard-Fisted Farmer.
BEET STAsHEN, (Which is in the State
of Illinoy), Aug 10, 1871 hev left
the Corners, temporarily, at least, Tor
hev field Nv labor here, wich ez quite
ez pleasant ez that in my old home. i
am up here in the anti-monopoly busi-
ness. am in Illinoy, groanin over the
burdens piled upon us farmers, and
DAMN, with all the vehemence that's III
to me. the monopolies that is suckin the
life-blood out Nv the honest laborin
classes, and tryin to convince EN- that
their redempshun kin only be brot about
by abandonin to wunst the Infamous Re
publikin party, witch is responsible for
every evil that's onto the country, from
railrodes down to the potato bug.
We hev at the Stashen noble coterle
Nv sympathisers with the hard-fsted yo-
manry-a most gorgeously sympathlsln
set ez ever | see, aud so afflicted are we
at the troubles wich the pordoosers are
labrin under, that we hold meetins
perpetooly in the room back NV the
bar NV the jackson hotel, to consider
EN-.
The leedin sperit among us, aside
from me, is veteran sympathizer with
labor, witch his name is Petlus. Abslum
Pettus wus originally a shoemaker, but
early in life developed talent for holdin
offs. He wuz elected sheriff Nv the
county, and the bench witch knowed him
wunst, immejitly knowed him no more
forever. There wuz some difficulty
about some colleckshuns wich he made,
witch wuz esteemed of sufficient impor-
lance to prevent his bein renominated,
and like ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS, he wuz turned
out to the thin grass Nv privit life for
years, witch time he spent prinsipslly
ornamentin corner groceries, and aboos-
in society, witch didn't recognize him,
earnin Twin by collectin the bills for
his wife's dress-makin establishment, to
wich, when biznis wuz dull, he added q
laundry. President Linkin wuz indoost
by the citizens Nv the Stashen, to appint
him collector, the sed citizens vainiy i'm
aginin that eff he he'd good fat thing
he mite possibly pay his debts. III
everybody he owed signed his applica
, shun for the appointment, he he'd tht
longest list Nv names that ever went GU
Nv that village. He continyood in off
dooriR Johnson's administrator, heviI
, come to the conclooshen that Johnson
policy was correct, jest after that graft
| man notified him that he should chol
/ off the head of eny offishul that didn't
But Grant busted him; sence wich tim
, he has been consistent Democrat ant
lover NV the laborin classes. He he.
3 seen close times sence-often hez he BIZ
! without the necessaries Nv life, for hi
{ wife is gettin advanced in years, ant
' can't wash and sew every day. Mr.. Pet
8 tus goes into the movement agin oppres
s sive monopolies and SIGH, with all hi
E heart, sole, body and strength. IF
! bleeves in the nobility of labor-h
holds that labor hez not its proper re
| ward, and ez for his part he will ente
( into a croosade agin the bloated monoE
I olists, and in behalf of the horny-handet
agricultoorist of the country, with al
the zeal of his trooly fervid naeher
One Nv the most techin sites in nacher
to see Pettus leanin ON a bar, and dis
coursin on the grandjer Nv labor. ii
) SEE that if the farmers, the hard handle
/ labrin masses NV his county want car
! didate for auditor who loathes and hate
= the oppresshun NV labor, in whateve
u form it may come, he is their man.
Samuel Blather is another one Nv th
| lol xrbc NTH Ho 10
II Democrat in politics, and alluz hez biz
. He has diskiyered that the farmers al
u groanin under desputism. He don
Il own no farm hisself nor he don't bu
y nor sell any prodoose, nor anything els
nor hez he any pertikeler bizniss, but
/" feels there is an incubus witch ways ont
le the labrin man, and, fur one, he fee
10 like putten his shoulder to the wheel an
Is rs histin it. He expecks to be the Dem
le cratic candidate for county reeorde
+ and if the farmers know their friends
III eff they only kin be brought to reco
o. nize them whose hart beet responsive
Is theirn, and put him on their ticket, |
VI hez soft thing Nv it. He kin truly 81
III that he never laid under tree, seein Il
T. hard-handed victim NV monopoly
" sweatin under his ill-requited toll, wit
We out feelin for him, and his buzzu
Is heeves ez he thinks Nv the opportuni
he hez now to champion that class. (
SEE he is the best man for recorder in Il
~ county.
Cephas Billins holds that the only RI
ly uge that the farmers hev is in the bu
SO yum Nv the Democratic party-tha
RS where they want to go. He feels in his SO
that they are opprest. He amt jest sho
at ez he knows wat Their wrongs is, but
er personnel it he'd suthing to do with m
or nopolies or suthin Nv that sort, but ws
ut. ever it wuz he stands ready to denoun
err. it. Let us, he said organize grange
Ms wunst, and when it comes to the elecshl
ly let us see eff the bloated Republican pa
nv ty shood longer ride on the backs
honest workinmen-the hard-handed a
:, ricultoorists.
-, Last week we held meeting in G
y. back room and resolved ourselves into
rs grange, with Pettus, Blather, Billins al
~ myself ez the prinsiple ofisers. Hev
~ just got the organizashen all safe, al
~ in proper hands. we ishood an address
the farmers Nv the country to come
as and jine. l urged EN- to let the farme
at organize it, but my co-laborers decline
Ing They sed they preferred to make certa
H. L. L