Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-13

| into close proximity with her own, and
before she could fully realize her position,
she received prolonged kiss-a hearty
smack, given with d significant gusto
which indicated that the unknown was
taking his revenge for some past slight
paying off some old score; for it said as
plainly as words could have done
"There, take thatr' And all this fell
upon her unotfending, virtuous matron
lips!
ooh, Murder! Murder! 'Tain't Joshua
neitherp'
For she had by this time diverted her
self Of the impression that it was her
usually sober spouse returned home in a
strangely exalted condition, thus to in
dulge in such unwonted demonstrations
of conjugal affection. "Git out! Git out,
l say! Murder! Fire! Thieves! Annie!
Annie! do come here! Here's a man
kissin' me like madr'
But the intruder had by this time dis
covered his mistake; and it did not need
the indignant pummelling and pounding
of the old lady's respectable fists to make
him relinquish his hold and race off as if
pursued by some avenging fury.
| Annie, nearly choked with smothered
laughter, in spite of her trepidation, now
came to the rescue.
ooh, never was so took aback in all
my born days! The mean scamp! Who
could it have been? Annie, have you an
idea?"
But that dutiful daughter was to all
appearance as innocent and ignorant as
an infantile dove. She tried to soothe the
indignant matron by representing that it
might have been O. one of the neighbors,
who under the potent influence of a wee
| f0o hoI or ho
and-the housewife! She searched the
entry for the missing spectacles, arranged
the rumpled cap ribbons, wound up the
tangled yarn, stirred the fire-all in the
most amiable manner possible-and at
last had the satisfaction of seeing her
mother subside into her rocking chair
and her usual tranquility OF spirits.
But Mrs. Moore was fully awake now.
She had got new idea into her head;
instead of settling herself for another
nap, she pursued her train of thought and
her knitting both together, with wonder
full rapidity. At length, stopping and
looking keenly at Annie over her specta-
cles, she said:
cit may be a queer notion of mine,
Annie, but I've fancy that that man was
David Winthrop"
Oh! but if Armies face didn't catch fire
then! You might have lit any number of
candles by it.
These suspicious symptoms did not
escape the eye Of the skillful inquisitive,
who calmly continued:
Pears SO to be; cause them big
Whiskers put me in mind of his'n; and
then the awkward way he gripped me
with his big paws!"
No answer But Annie was wonder
fully busy. She bent over her work and
drew her needle through so quickly that
the thread snapped, and then she didn't
have time to talk, she was SO taken up
with trying to coax the thread through
the eye again!
Infexible Mrs. Moore went on:
II don't believe that kiss was intended
for me after all. Do you, Annice Well,
of course we know it wasn't. But then
| do wonder who it was intended for?
And wonder if you don't know some
thing more about it than you see fit to tell?"
"Me, Mother7''
eyes, me mother. You was mighty
anxious to get me an Pap off to Aunt
Ruth's tonight; but l noticed you was
slicked up extraordinary, for all you
weren't going"
Here Annie lost her needle, and went
down on the floor to find it.
"Now, ANNIE" her mother went or,
| III OIti, KNOW ludt, Uut MAVEN /
quite lost my eyesight yet, nor my hearin'
neither. I've surmised little somethin'
about these COINS on between you and
| David afOre now. What are you play
in pnssum fur? Out with it, 1say. Tain't
fair to be tryin' to come it over your old
mother"
Thus adjured, our small feminine Ma
chiaval made clean breast Of it, much
relieved to find that mother "hadn't nuth-
in agin him." and would give father a
talkin' to about it, an bring him
around"
'But, ANNIE" said Mrs. Moore. dryly,
in conclusion, II want you to tell David
I'd rather he'd not make such mistake
as that again. / don't like the feel of his
big whiskers about my face, and, more
over, don't approve of promiskus kis-
sin'!"
David never heard the last of that kiss
in the dark! Old Squire Moore, Of course,
heard of it, and used to take great delight
in slyly abiding to the circumstance
when all the parties concerned happened
to be present. He would shake his hurly
sides with laughter at David's evident
discontinue and his wife's replies, while
Annie would side with her father and
poke sly fun at her sweetheart, and then
both of them would laugh again at the
other two until the tears ran down theil
cheeks.
Never MIND, David" Mrs. Moore
would say consolingly, to the abashed
lover, "let them laugh" "He'd have
only been too glad to have been in you,
place thirty years ago. He had hard
work to get kiss from me then. hope
the occurrence will be lesson to you an
Annie agin the un-policy of under hand
doins' of all sorts, SEEM as how they're
liable to end, in SIGH cases, in kissin' the
, wrong one in the dark"
Door Knockers.
Is there any particular reason, we won
der, why those sensibly contrived, thor