Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1873-01-03
Written for the Journal.
STORM AND CALM,

Five o'clock, by the summer sun. whose |
avs fell slantingly over the waters Of the ,
sound, upon the beachcd margent" OF
which [ stood wrapt in paiflfal thought.
Such a still, sweet day; so calm was the
plane Of ocean that the gray old rocks
which, like grim monsters, guarded the
entrance to the inlet, seemed floating in /.
sea, were like the wings of happy birds,
out shaken in peaceful flight. The tiny, ;
lleecy cloudlets moved slowly overhead, as
though loving to linger near this beautiful
SPOT. Save the gentle murmur OF the
waves, no sound was heard, unit! my i'm
patient, rebelliolS feet crushed the pretty
pebbles, grinding them remorselessly into
the earth. For, strange to say, the felicity
of all things external made me feel the
ever before. With a last look of reproachful
envy at the smiling water, turned my
back and threw myself down OH one OF the
masses of sandstone with which this shore
is dotted and my weak, complaining
medtations We're such as these: why
should all dumb things be so complete, III
such perfect harmony with their surround
,gs, and so joyous in their life that they
really seem to be lifting up glad faces OF
thanktulness; and, though lips TO speak
their song of praise are denied them, YET |
silent eloquence, their need of gratitude?
Why should even the bits o. sea-Weed |
which my angry hands are tearing, be en-
braced with Gods care, and have
work appointed unto them, whilst
I. far removed from the happy Southland,
where dwell all whom l love and
long for-vainly pine for useful action, and
feel, alas how keenly that out of the mil
lions of people, going and coming 'rouno
about me, have not one friend to cheer
nv loneliness, or tighten my heavy dark
do it. o for the blessed "tglow of labor,
the purifying fire wherein the poisor
! thoughts that war against the soul are con-
sumed. To live for nothing" Here
paused, and endeavored to begin again
| more nationally. l thought of my moth
.r's happy childhood, of her merry laugh
ter and bounding spirits, so often and so
! lovingly spoken of by those who had known
her then. But l knew that, since | could
recollect her face, which t'od had now hid
! den from me with the veil Of Death, 1t had
been saddened by sorrow that the lines of
care were traced there as with a pen of
iron: that the little thOughtless hands,
| which had played about this very lock,
had grown weak and trembling from her
| hard toll for her children that all her hap
piness had died because acc lived, and that
her wears had been shortened by Der auxi-
ETY. for us.
Yet what had it all availed? This life
of mine, for whose comfort she had so
labored, for whose usefulness she had
prayed always, hat good bad ever grown
out Of it? Eighteen years had brought iue
to woman's estate, and l had lived for
nothinq, | hurried past this hateful
thought, and continued: Nay, these six
months which 1 have spent under the same
skies where passed lily mothers girl
hood.-now that they are nearly
gone, can show eng, the slightest
reason WHY il had not been as we'll that
they had never come: Whom had taught
J to love me, that would miss my footballs
when they came 10 more, or so',o1r that
for item NY voice was silent: What sill
: Gle beniit had all these weeks brought: &c
! any one by my hand !? To avoid the
wretcLed reply that rose in my heart,
| hurriedly continued - But have been
. always ready it is surely not my fault
: No, it is Gods, who has forgotten me He
> il is, who has banished me from all VIE
could help and teach ne. and has tahei
away the only one or two whom | really
} wanted. He has given mc no enc to love
Or 10 live for Il is He who keeps ley
heart empty, aud starved and loneis-wIt
, sees nv bitter tears, and hears me wailipc
for the affection and companionship of bu
orc heart, auC gives no heed sc dOHcht
l les 0Jeii{cs ct ne iaissc cricr.'' lie has re
mem bered the clouds, the waves, TIE plant!
aud she)ls-but left he out of His Proyi.
dence. / am going away iii Il week, and
out OF all the boundless universe of sympa
, thy and OF usefulness, Ee has helped me
to-aothiny' This narrowing thought hat
come once too often for even last shadow
Of self-possession. l spraDg from my rest
! ing place, ran 10 tiny skiif which lay
l anchored for lily service in the cove, leapet
| ia aud pulled vigorously, as had SO ofter
done the les. half ycar-slnply to shake of
: unpleasant repinings. Without design
, made straight fer the main channel, ano
had worked away doggedly for many min
utcs, ere raised my head, and found that
: with the favorirg tide, had gone very far
and that my !,editations on shore, and my
: subsequent labor Ihad occupied m,,cl
moro time than l had realized.
: saw, too, that a great change hat
come over this scene, erewhile as still as a
. painted ocean! No sunshine now. NJ
} light clouds drifting DER azure heavens
. One black, scrcl'-like mass stretched above
me, one daIk-heaving sea-tipped with the
white foam of passion stirred billOws-
: around me ; and, farther out in the offing
little steamer, snOrting with terror, wa:
| making all speed for land-to escape, il
change, though stan Ting, did not Fighter
! my present humor greatly. My residence
here upon the Sound, il productive Of
nothing else, had taught me the easy lnan
asement Of my boa, and familiarized Inc
= with the dangers of the deep; so l wa:
rather inclined to defy these noisy, scold
: ing waves, knowing that, rs there was nc
under-tow or strong current, had less tC
fear even than from the steamer which
J s., ref,o
, coming into our inlet for bar Dor, l stood q
! chance Of being run down or swamped
u less l could make her see me in time
4 Had the sea been calm, l should have ven
l tured, i'll the short space left, still further
out; but as it was, could ouly wait. I he
} lightning, like waving swords, cut flaming
ines on the frowning cope Of heaven, and
tie great artillery OF the sky doomed ou
! warning signals as [ now aDxiously noted
the movements of the vessel. which, under
fun head OF steam, came pnngiug through
The rolling pillows. ! could now plainly
dis inguish those On deck, and even heal
the shouts of the Ulcers. The men were
laboring to shorten sail-with which such
craft are often provided-and which
, had been set for gentle breeze
1t seemed they were too few fol
the work, too few for the safety even Of
the SIT amers with such gale as might be
: coming. Presently taller form Joined
those toiling at the ropes. With his aid
saw that the canvas was about to be adj
justed but, suddenly, lurch of the vessel
as she changed her direction, overbalancee
him, and, in the twinkling Of an eye, he
was struggling for life in the boiling water
The whole drama was enacted in less time
than the recital occupies! One thinks and
decides rapidly in such crisis. There need
. ed but an instant's reflection to know that
with sails set and steam driving her on, the
vessel could never stop in time to save that
man fighting yonder for life, and that with
the lives of her passengers at stake, she
could not delay. NJ if then, and u,a