The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-06-07
ANECDOTES.


A YANKEE TRIcK--Ac certain farmer, who
IN the course OF year purchased several
hundred dollars worth Of goods land always
paid for them ,.called at the store of vii
lage merchant his regular place of dealing
with two dozen brooms, which he offered
for sale. The merchant (who by the way
is fond of a good bargain) examined his
stock, and said: = .6
We'll, Cyrus, I will give you a shilling
apiece for those brooms."
Cyrus seemed astonished at the offer. and
quickly replied:
"Oh, no, John, can't begin to take that
for 'em, no how; but I'll let you have 'em
for twenty cents apiece, and not cent less. u
Cyrus, you are crazy" replied John.
" Why, see here" showing a fine lot Of
brooms, " is an article great deal better
than yours (which was true), which / am
retailing at twelve and half cents apiece
(which was not true by seven and a half
cents).
Don't care for that" answered Cyrus
your brooms are cheap enough, but you
can't have mine for less than twenty cents
anyhow; and pretending to be rather more
than half angry, shouldered his brooms and
started for the door. .-H f.;..-
The merchant getting nervous over the
loss OF an old customer, and fearing he might
go to another store and never return, said
g See here, Cyrus, hold on a while. If |
give you twenty cents for your brooms, you
Will not object to take the price of them out
in goods?" ...... g+..s 3 r.
No, I don't care if do replied Cyrus.
swell, as you are an old customer, will
allow you twenty cents apiece for this. lot.
Let me see-twenty-fo times twenty
makes just four hundred and eighty cents.
What kind of goods will you have, Cyrus? 4"
Well, now, John, reckon it don't make
any difference to you what sort of goods
take, does it?"
oh, no, not at all" said the merchant.
Well, then, as it don't make any differ
ence, will take the amount in them brooms
OF yours at twelve and half cents. Let
me see-four dollars and eighty cents
will get thirty brooms and ten cents
over. 1t don't make much difference, John,
about the ten cents, but as you are right
clever fellow, believe I'll take the change
in terbacker"
When Cyrus went out of the door with
his brooms and terbacker," John was selz-
ed with serious breaking out at the mouth
during which time he was distinctly heard
to violate the third commandment several
times by the bystanders, who all enjoyed
the joke.
TAKE IT EAsY.-A few days since, consta-
bic Judd was called upon to fulfill writ of
ejectment, issued by son of the Emerald
Isle, against a fellow countryman. Dan,
who never waits for persuasion to do his
duty, instantly called on Pat, and found
him seated in the house named in the writ,
enjoying a dudeen.
Good morning, Pat" says Dan, pulling
out his writ.
The top O. the morning to YOURSELF"
replied Pat, undisturbed.
Patrick, have business with you," con-
tinued the constable.
"Bedad and shure ye have, and why would
ye be afther calling on me, sir?
" have a writ here, commanding me to
eject you and your goods from this house.
It's rather an unpleasant duty, but"
;" All, is it Michael O'Callighan that Or
dered ye shure?"
Yes, sir, Michael is the man."
" And did he pay the costs, Misther Con-
stable?"
Certainly-we always demand advanced
costs in these cases."
Thin we've been paid for yer work,
shure?"
Certainly"
"Thin ye can do it; divil bit will Patrick
O'Brien stan in the way of mans working
for his pay"
This rather astonished Dan, who expect
ed as usual in such cases, to meet with seri-
Gus resistance. He dotted his coat, and af-
ter an hours hard labor, succeeded in remov-
ing the Irishman's household goods from
the building into the street. After secur-
ing the house from improper intrusion, Dan,
fatigued with the labors he had performed,
started away. In bidding him good-by,
Pat, who was seated on part of his goods,
with the dudeen still in his mouth, remark
ed:
AN I'm obliged to ye, sir, for saving
me all the trouble"
Howl" r5E-.
Faith, an wasn't goin' to move an
wasn't | jist taken off my coat, to lug out
the duds, sir, whin you come and carried
'em all down for me, without charging me q
clint at all? I'm much obliged to we, sir,
an hope yell call agin whin Patrick O'Brien
wants his goods carried down stairs, SIR
Dan suddenly had business at another
place, though the joke was SO good he could
not help telling it afterward. -5 I'd.