The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1873-10-14
Selert Shru.
UNDER THE SEAT.
IY A TRAVELLER.

"Smoking carriage, sir?" asked the
porter, as he bore my rugs and minor
packages along the platform. said yes,
and he made me comfortable, and re
ceived his sixpence Then the guard
came to look after my well being, but
got nothing more than innocent graft
tude, which was perhaps all he desired.
have no doubt that 1 did him injustice
ia attribating his efforts TO induce fat
old gentleman with a cough: q lesa old
gentleman who was snuffy; and mid.
dle-aged gentleman, enveloped in wraps,
part of whose face was covered up like
femsle Turk's,a IAN evident window shut
ter, to enter my carriage, in order to
spite me.
Duty to his employers alone made
him endeavor to till up, but the British
anxiety to get as much room as possible
for my money was strong within ne,and
stirred unciaritable suspicious.
You may lead horse to the water, OIL
an anti-nicotinian old gentleman to 9
smoking car, but you can't make hin
get in; and when each in turn put his
head in my compartment, he jibbed, fol
some late occupants of it had been cigar
not pipe-smokers, and it was rather
strong. So l was apparently left alone
alone with the Times, and all the
comic weeklies, and a modern poem.
The doors were banged, the engine
whistled, the train began to move. i
would not stop again until we got te
Peterborough, so that was safe to bt
undistu.bed so far. There were six seats
and ! could occupy as many of them as
limited number of members permitted
l almost wished myself an Octopus, to
take full advantage of the situation
Coming down, hung up my hat, put or
a gaudy piece Of neck-tie work won in :
bazaar rattle, lit my pipe, cut my papers
and began to enjoy myself.
/ sat in the lefthand corner with my
back to the engine, absorbed in big
law suit 1t is great fun to read cross
examination, and watch how clever
lawyer will make an honest man perjurt
himself. 1t reads almost like crime,
/ remarked aloud; "but then it is ar
honorable, lawful beneficial crime. Sol
diers kill peoples bodies, lawyers xii
peoples regulations, all for the good o
society in the long run"
While l was uttering the word ''run,
my ankles were grasped suddenly and
firmly; then, before l could recover from
the shock, they were jerked backward
under the seat with such force that l wa!
thrown forward, sprawling. tried tc
rise, but my right wrist was seized, ant
the right arm twisted till was helpless
and presently l found myself on tht
floor of the carriage, face downward,
knee being scientifically pressed into thu
small of my back, and both arms fxet
behind me. My elbows tied together
and then the knee removed, and my an
kles were secured. During this latte
operation 1 kicked and struggled.
"Hum!' said deliberate voice, "tha
will be awkward. Let's see; ah, thes,
will do
"These" were my sticks and umbrella
which some one proceeded to apply a
splints to the backs of my legs, using th
straps which had kept them in bundl
to fix them at the ankle and above tn
knee. When he had done, was as help
less as trussed turkey.
Then / was turned over carefully an,
tenderly, and for the first time saw m.
assailant.
l He was gentlemanly looking man
dressed in black coat and waistcoat
gray trowsers and neckcloth. His hal
and whiskers were just turning grizzly
his chin and upper lip were clean sliav
ed. His forehead was high, his eye
prominent and fixed in their expression
his nose aquiline, his mouth slit. H
was Of middle height, square but wiry
indeed his muscles must have been eS
ceptionally elastic and feline, for yo
would never have thought to look a
him, that he could stow himself ava
under the seat of a railway carriage 81
completely.
He contemplated me, with his chin i
This right hand, and his right elbow O
bis left hand, and said thoughtfully:
"Just so. All for the good of societ
in lifelong run-an admirable sentimen,
my dear sir; let it be consolation t
you, if should cause you any little an
noyance."
He took seagreen spectacle case fror
his POCKET, wiped the glasses CAREFUL
with silk handkerchief, and ADJUSTS
them to his nose. Then he produced a
oblong box, which he unlocked an,
placed on one of the seats After whicI
, he sat down quietly in the place l ha,
occupied five minutes before, a position
which brought him close over my heat
and chest,as I lay supine and helpless q
his feet.
''Do you know anything of anatomy
he asked. / was as completely in hi
power as a witness in the cross examn
ing counsels, and prudence dictated tha
l should be equally ready to answer tn
most frivolous and impertinent question
with politeness. / said that l did not.
"Ah!" he said "Well, perhaps yo,
may have heard Of the spleen? Exactly
Now, science has never yet been able t
fine out the use of that organ, and tn
man who bequeathed that knowledge s.
posterity would rank with the discovere
of the circulation Of the blood, and con
fer an inestimable benefit on humanit
for the remainder Of the worlds lease
| 1 propose to dissect You"
"You will not get much glory b
that" forcing myself to seem to TAX
this outrageous practical joke in goo
part. Tan unerateful generation ma
or may not profit by your discoveries
but it will infalibly hang YOU"
mot So" he blandly replied. 81 al
surgeon, who once had very consit
cradle practice, but had to stand m
1lial for an experiment that proved fat;
: to one of my patients. The jury, uns
BILE to understand the sacrifices which a
earnest inquirer is ready to offer at til
shrine of science, declared me mad, an
/ was placed in confinement You sc
that l can act with impunity."
And he opened the box broke OF
in cold sweat Was it all real ? Coul
5 the man he in earnest?
E 'But," said I, surely you can get dea
bodies to disscct, without having II