The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1873-06-12
.I:gs d . and ] dfd ID Iil rlght. .head.

poke: ii it hadn't been for the yieldin
contents of that poke, INV bonnie
would have been eternaily ruined
After that | sot still all night, no
,Ieepin' fast, but dozin' on Johns
.houlder. Next morniu' man pok &c
lis head in al The door and yelled
Buffalo,
"Where?' says /, poppin' up my
read. lis it a whole drove of 'em
fohn, don't you wish yo'd brought
your gun ?" 7.
Jane Eliza" said he, "you'r dream.
u. Don't you know this is the town
Of Buffalo, where we change cars p
"What Tor ?" saws I. these keers =
good enough for me-"
by this ume John and me and the
baggage dragged after the crowd thai
vas pOurin' out onto the StoOp. We
| offered man who said he was goiu'
| - the Falls, and after Il short ride we
got to our predestinatiOn- The tOlks
must have knoWd we was n briLIal
couple, cause they paid US so much
| detention. Que feiier seized my poke,
Jut / held On 10 it lnauinlly, and IL il
hadn't been made OF strong unbleach-
ed muslin, it would have gul tore cer-
in. John had 10 nearly ng ght2em of
/ with his cotton um bI ellcr, aAd finally
/ hey got NE and my poke ia one kerr
| fege, and JofIn and his uInbreiler in
luoIher. jist waved my hand to
| him in last farewell, and sunk back
helpless, thinkn' I'd never see him
lgin. JUhu saw me, aud he jist opened
| ais um0reller right through the win
Ter, and rolled out 50 quick that the
nan on top never seen hmm, but drove
Dn inherently. 80 John stopped the
TELLER that was driVin' NE, and says TO
him: ~
II am much obliged to you for your
contention but this il my Jane Eliza,
md Pd like TO inquire where you be
goin'. a9
10 the International" said the
nan.
ESOh hang your Infernalation! said
John. I'VE come to STE Niaggerya
Falls"
but we want somethin' TO eat
whispered.
Then John said; "DO you know OF
my tavern about where we could gilt
iodgiIland. .VIttles while we say here 7"
.Pn Your man." said the driver
Jump in" He's rItle clever, now,
4in't he," says l.. ''Yes," says John,
but Pm afraid he'll suspect as TO give
lin sutnm." Well" says {, YOU
IAN afford 10 be liberal hand him q |
quarter when we git OUT" NO" say s
Iohn, dime1l do; tain't wutli 50
much" But If you'll believe my
racket, that " oundreI made US pay 50
or ridin' no Iurder than y sqnIfreI
;ould Jump. We went into a big
room and sot down to watch the
poke while John Went-to get a room.
[ wish you could have seen the queer
oOkiug females that come in there
every one OF 'ein had humps on their |
packs, and had their hair draWd up on ]
op of their heads like q Indian had
concluded TO scalp 'em and then had |
changed his mind, while more tlounces
tud iumpOodIes than could count |
livered their skirts, and the way the /
Try goods lay around OH the floor was
I sin TO think of. You WouldH't have
znowd one of them had feet. begin |
% git ashamed OF my calf-skin shoes /
sh0win' SO plain, and jist then l no.
ticed every eye was sot on me like / |
belonged to Barnum's show that cum |
20 our town once. FinalIya pert miss,
who had enough brass haHgin' around |
aer to start a foundry, come up to me |
md says, "How long have you been 1
Jut of the ark, Mrs. Noah 2" ''Long1
enough To wish l was back agiii, If eV- /
,rybody meet hain't got any more I
manners than you Miss" said 4. The I
olks around Iaffed, and that little chit I
got out of the room qaickern wink. 1
John come back then, and we fOllered /
the colored man up five or six stairs, |
ill | thought we'd got to the garrett.
But the room was rale nice, and we |
TO have our grub sent up, SO
we wouldn't have to go among the [
heathens.
Arter eatin'suthiA' we slipped down.
stairs aud went out into the store to I
look around spell. We. hadn't gone
rod afore them fellers was arter MS Il
out we didnt git took in this time +
we list walked Ga and hired asmall |
0oy to show US the Falls. We walked |
| long ways and the boy said sndIlen-
~, There they are," and darted of, |
Where W says John Henry, 81 don't |
see nothing but an extraordinary big I
mill dam, that must run powerful /
dig mill" Oh pshaW, John,n says III
them's imagery Falls" What r. said
John. 81 hope l amt come all this
way, and paid out enough money to
Guy half section of land, just to see
| lot of water tumble down over some 4
rocks. Let's go home, Jane Eliza p
But 1 wasn't ready. ''They say you
see more il you take kerrIge," says
[. '.Wel," says John Henry, sighin',
Jane Eliza, III do anything for you Il
so here goes" And we hailed AM
open one and got in. This driver was
pretty clever, and didn't charge SO
much. Arter drivin' awhile he stopl
ind said to us; "You are now in the
Dominions of Queen Victoria" Att
this. John perked up a bit (he'd been
lookin' as resigned as ''lanb to the
as the poet says,) /
and said: "Where is the old lady p
rrot her out. I'd like to see livej
Queen" "Why, J JohM," whispered.
don't you know the Queen lives way
over in England, cross the ocean ?-f
rhis is Candy, guess" "Wal, how
should [ know we wasn't III Eng
land ?" said John. Spears to me I've
gone through enough since left Mud
Gown TO cross two oceans. l wouldn't
oe surprised to see the North Pole a.,
The length we've traveIed;" and he
never said another word till we got
back to the tavern house.
But I've writ enough now, and III
simply say that we've got back to our
farIn, near Midtown, a little wiser
but much poorer than when we start
ed, and if ever you ketch me gOin> on
another bridal tower, it'll be when
my names no longer Jane Eliza.
When we got home the cows had
all foundered, and two of them died.
Yours sorrowtully, 3iT
JANE ELIZA.