Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1873-04-29
PARAGRAPHICAL.

| EAhAUhAfdkCAL
There is young chap now connected
with the st. Louis Dispatch, who is proba
bly, the most gifted writer of his age, in
America. He was detailed to write up a
party given by lady OF that city in honor
of Miss Nellie Grant few days ago, and
in the course of q long report he refers to
the structure-the anatomy, so to speak, of
the ladies present, by alludiDg to their "sylph-
like forms that seemed more spirituelle from
the misty cloud of Illusion and gauze which
enveloped them, and the beauty of radisn Mt
Junos received fresh lustre from the sheen
of satin or silk which draped their queenly
persons"
If there is hen residing in Nashville,
with well developed motherly instincts, and
who has no chickens of her own, she can
be put in the way of adopting a brood by
/ applying on Summer street, near Broad.
A box Of eggs fell from wagon passing
down that street yes erday, and the shells
came Fl some of those eggs, thus thrust
ing upon the cold charities of the world
quite number of very young hens and
roosters, who would be pleased to have
some responsible, experienced hen, of good
moral character, take charge of them until
they become somewhat acquainted with
Nashville ways. Unless one of this kind
presents herself soon, there will doubtless
be spring chickens for sale in the market.
A party of eight Nashville young men,
desiring to escape, for q few hours, from
| the noise, turmoil and hustle of city life,
took occasion, Sunday evening, TO ride out
six or eight miles into the country, for the
purpose of ''communing with nature"
Il I. IL
keg of beer which they found hid away,
and by the time they started on their re-
turn home, the keg gave a very hollow
sound upon being struck. The young men
were sufficiently full, however.
This very fine piece of irony appears in
the New York Tribune: Far be it from Us
to undertake to instruct the undergraduate.
As well paint the lily or gid refined gold.
And yet there are things thst are not intui-
tive to the wisdom of the undergraduates
things gathered from experience, not pluck
ed from the tree of knowledge. We beg
leave to say, accordingly, that the average
undergraduate labors under delusion. A
harmless delusion, arising out of his mod
esty, but one perhaps he will thank us for
dispelling. The mistake of the undergrad
uate is in supposing that he would not be
al SUuC kL5u illdu uulcSc, W Dcu
he arrives at a hotel, he registers his college,
"Y ale, !" Harvard" or what not, as his
place of residence. An educated man is al
ways recognized by bis wearing a stovepipe
hat and carrying cane. If this does not
answer to the uneducated mind, it is only
necessary to order breakfast in a dead Ian
gusge, and aceost the waiter in profane.
These signs are unmistakable. But even
~ ohnzrlA of n hpfal and rfekr
of not being recognized as man Of liberal
education, don't register the name of your
college. 1t does not pay. All of us-have
done it, and all of us are ashamed of it.
Now that We have grown old, and don't
know anything like as much as We did then,
we begin TO realize that it was not necessa-
~ to advertise ourselves as scholars. 1t
might be now; it was not then.
And now the Avalanche is on its ear,
(The AUdldache is a newspaper publish ed
in Memphis) On Sunday last, the editor
of that sheet wrote cruel, bitter paragraph,
which paragraph was printed, namely, viz,
as follows, thus: "There is 'locaP writer
on the Nashville UNION AND AMERICAN
who sets up as great American humorist.
1t is noticeable that bis department is unu
sually brilliant the day after tbs receipt Of
the Danbury Netcs or after circus has
been Sin town. His superiority over bis
brother tlocals' is in his ability to write
better with his SCISSORS than they can with
their pencils, and all are jealous of him"
The tlcc writer on the Nashville UNION
AND AMERICAN" referred to by the AUa.
Ldnche man, read that paragraph, and his
heart was filed with grief. He realizes
that he has nothing left to live for, since
his contributions TO the current literature of
the day find no favor in the eyes Of tie
Avalanche man, and as, from his ear
Hest infancy, it has Teen a constant
Struggle with him to sustain that
life which is now so devoid
of hope, be reslly doesn't care how soon
"the silver thread is loosened" Cor words to
that effect.) However, in this, his hour of
sorest sffiiction and deepest gloom, be COM
forts himself with these reflections; He
never "set up as a great American humOr-
ist." (He does "set up" with his "=url" &C.
casionally, but always in his own private
character, and not that of ga great Ameri-
eau humorist"); he never saw a copy of the |
Danbury Ne11S, and, lastly, he never at
tended but one circus in the whole peri cd
of his eventful career. Upon that occasion
he was gradually working his way under |
the canvass in quiet, unostentatious sort |
of way, when one of the circus men
accidently hit him on the head with club,
whereat TIE faocal writer on the Nashville |
UNION AND AMERICAN became discOur-
aged and shook circuses forever. BE now |
argues that circuses have an immoral infu. |
ence. But now he bids good bye to eircuses |
and everything else of that kind. He don't |
care to live any longer, and Notary Public |
will be called in tomorrow for the purpose |
of drawing up will, and to show that our
local man is not vindictiVe, he announces
bis determination to will to the Avalanche |
those scissors, which it appears he has
welded TO some purpose. Tney might be |
used to advantage in making up the col
umns of the Avalanche.