Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-12-18

| ulllng up the spaces IN Jne vase Win us
compressed flesh and twisted bones. This
growth in the bottle lasts for several
years. At a given period it is without
remedy. When the mould has taken, and
the monster is made, they break the vase,
! and the child comes out of it.-IO-ddy.
The PrOYident Man and His Misery.
The member., of the Danbury Water
Board have unnecessarily imposed upon
themselves the most dreadful secreSy as
to their official movements. Where there
is break to repair or an improvement to
make which is to disturb the pipes, they
cut off the water without any notice, and
the first intimation the housewife has of
the misfortune is when she turns the tau-
Get and receives in response the dubious
grooming of escaping air Then the head
of the house takes the pail and "shins" out
for neighboring well, and if the remarks
he makes were put in book it would
take pretty smart man to hold the book.
But this shutting off the water is griev-
Gus matter, and our people have become
very sensitive about it. Monday after
noon, while Mr.. Cobleigh was ciphering
out some calculation in his store, he over
heard some one say that the water was
to be shut off for two days. AS the near
est well to Mr. Cobleighs house is quar-
ter of mile away, that gentleman gave
utterance to an expression of earnest
gratitude, coupled with an observation
intended to enliven the Water Board,
precipitated himself into his coat, and
started for home at rapid speed. Arriv-
ing there all out Of breath, and in heat
that made his flesh CULVER, he threw his
excellent wife into undue trepidation by
screaming for the tubs, pals and barrels.
But when she learned, which she gradual
ly did, that the water was to be shut off
at once, she entered heartily into the eX-
citement and earnestness. First the tubs
were snatched out of the cellar, and
snatched upstairs with equal celebrity,
and while Mr.. Cobleigh tended to their
filling, and glared ferociously at the run
ming stream, Mrs. Cobleigh ransacked the
house for the available tinware. The
good lady was scarcely less unnerved than
her man, and under the inspiration of his
constantly recurring, Hurry, hurry, Ma,
tildar' it did seem, as she afterward
confessed, as if her head would
spin off and lose itself Once or twice
she stopped to explain, "Good heavens,
Moses, | can't be everywhere at"
but the "Hurry, hurry, Matilda" relent-
lessly cut her short and sent her into the
search again more distracted than ever.
Milk pals, pans and basins were brought.
Then she got down the bowls, and Mr..
CObleigh was going to call for the COB
lets when he was diverted by thinking of
the iron kettles, and they were brought
forth and all of them filled. One Of them
tipped over, but Mr.. Cobleigh caught the
contents in his shoes, and thus saved the
carpet. Then he filled the tea-kettle and
afterward the dipper, and finding no
fresh fields to cOLquer shut off the water,
and being in heavy perspiratiOn and eX-
hausted as to breath, sat down and rested.
After the rest he put off his wet clothes
and put on some dry ones, and exchanging
the wet shoes for pair of dry boots which
hurt his heel, he limped back to the store.
Once there he prepared to renew his
struggle with the problem he was engaged
on when electrified with the intelligence
tina; the water was to be cut off, but the
duplicity of the Water Board filled his
mind to the exclusion of all other topics,
and finally, laying aside his pencil, he
started with the sore heel for the office.
Commissioner Starbuck was present.
ooh, you are here, are yOu?" inquired
Mr.. Cobleigh, cOntemptuously. Certain
ly," said Mr.. Starbuck. "Well, you're a
nice one, amt you?" he observed, as If in
continuance of his interest in the Com
MISSIONS welfare. why, what's the
matter, Mr.. Cobleigh?" ''Matter?" asked
that gentleman, suddenly raising his
voice, and losing all the color about his
mouth. Matter, is it?" he cried, his
voice trembling with passion and the strain
- Il | W. If
to know, by shutting off the water
supply of this people without one
word of warning. without the faint
est notification of your base, sneak
ing designs? What do you mean by
putting the entire town into a state of con
fusion and suffering by the grossest piece
terrupted Mr.. Starbuck, "what do you
mean by this charge? The water is not
shut off" ''What?" gasped MIR. Coblelgh.
1.-The water has not been shut OIL" re-
peated Mr.. Starbuck. "But--aln't it to
be shut off this afternoon, and kept off for
two days?" asked Mr.. Cobleighh, with a
visible faltering in his tone: "Certalnl y
not" said Mr. Starbuck. Mr.. Cobleigh
| stared at the speaker with dreadful lnten-
sity. "Who told you this?" said the
Commissioner. a don't know now who
it was" said the unfortunate man, sudden
ly recalling himself to realizing sense OF
the horrid mistake. I" 1t was some all
fired fool in the store, and l was IN such q
hurry to get home that | never stopped to
look or think. Here | have been up to
Nelson street on dead run, turned over
the entire house, filled every vessel IN it
with water, lifted tubs that weighed ton
apiece wet every thread of clothing on
my body, and almost made lunatic of
my wife, and then had to get back to the
store with a boot that ground the skin
right off of my heel. And all, gasped
the miserable man, because of darned
black-hearted, lying idiot" Then as he
limped away, and thought on the appear
ance of his home, and the array OF anna
teur lakes and ponds within it, he Incl
dentally mentioned: " Confound the lying
scalawag; if l can get hold of him before
the thunderbolts of heaven overtake him,
l will smash every bone in his vlllalnous
carcass.-Danbatry Meas.
Paper containing many fine points,
4 The manor of noodles