Elizabeth daily monitor. [volume] (Elizabeth, N.J.) 1868-1880, 1873-10-02

/ puioOihB OOoOul CLlDu1Ct
the red pepper cruet into the mangel
OF " John the Baptist" turning his
clover hay into the very widest kind oil
honey-and set him sneezing till those
confoInded ears of bis stood up so stiff
and straight that they raked forward
like iack-rabbitts. And / mad up
my mind then and there never to let my
liking for brisk business bring me
round anything the further end of which
one has to watch to see what the nearer
end is going to do, especially when that
nearer one
Still, and rearer one
Yet than the other,
has way of lifting so quick and easy.
1t is sound business Judgment to
avoid the vicinity of any animal who's .
skin is SO short that he can't drop his
ears without raising his heels, the more
SO ii he happens to be so particularly
lively that he can go through both mo-
tons at once. Further than this
don't know that there's any special
point to my story. But I was Il good
deal hurt at the time, and my nose ever
since has borne considerable resem-
blance to badly turned pancake. 1t
has been some satisfaction to feel that
am more familiar with the habits of the
horse than l was before the accident
happened, and if any one fishes deeper
moral out of my story, it will further
crafty me to know that my nose was
not fattened in vain.
For an explanation of the present
trouble [ do not think that it is neces.
sary to look very far. If you have ever
had hold OF young and growing dog,
you must have noticed that nature keeps
the skin a good deal bigger than the
dog. You can take up the slack of the
skin in your hands, put two or three
reefs in it if You like, without pinching
the dog at all. The matter with us is
simply that our dog has grown so fast
as to become too big for his skin--after
stretching day after day till it got to be
as thin as tissue it has finally burst.
For several years the dog has been hide
bound. But / don't think he's dead,
even now.
Our present currency was created and
the amount fixed during the war, when
it had only to float the North since, it
has had to swim the South as well.
And while the amount in circulation has
been lessened by the destruction of
notes by fire, flood, and other accidents
"a lessening which must amount to
five or six per cent of the total, though
L do not remember to have heard this
alluded to even by those who complain
OF >" contraction well as by the
withdrawal Of the legal-tender certifi-
Gates, the values which this currency
was meant to represent have doubled
and trebl-d. This is precisely as if,
having launched ship-or scow, if
you please-we let a certain quantity of
water into the canal where she Law, suf-
ticient to float that ship or scow, and
then shut the gates against the admit
lance OF any further floating medium,
proceeding to load the vessel down till
her bottom settled in the mud. Plainly
one of two things must be done-either
let more water into the canal-that is,
give more currency, or else dump the
cargo and bring our ship back to draw
ing the same water she did in the first
place. The cargo being really of value
that is to say, values having really in
creased, not only in this country, but
the world over--more water would
seem the easier way out of the dilemma.
L don't assume to teach my grandmoth-
err how to suck eggs, but that is how it
looks to me. Had we gold and silver
circulation, the evil would right itself
money would flow in from other ma
lions, but this relief is denied by the ex-
isting nature of things, the currency of
the rest of the world being merely mer-
chandise to us, and in reality only going
to load our ship down deeper. Figure
it what way you please, does it not
amount to this in She endless freight
or more water
Reasoning abstractly, indeed, there
should never be panic on a paper
basis. One sells his securities-which
are paper-the good ones paying in
terest, and what does he get ? Simply
paper which pays no interest at all.
Having, after much trouble, succeeded
in getting rid of an eight per cent stock
or bond at from fifty to eighty cents on
the dollar, and got an awkward bundle
of greenbacks instead, which carry no
per cent, what are you to do with them:
Put them in bank, and the chances
are that the directors will speculate
with some, and the cashier clear Out
with what is left lend them on bond
and mortgage, and you find yours Ii
embarked in the real estate business
against your wish ; take them home and
sew them up in an old jacket, and youi
wife throws it out of the window, OF
trades it off with the ragman for a
plaster of paris Ajax OF porcelain
Magdalen. There's nothing for it il
you really want to be sure that you've
got something under you other than tc
contract the smallpox in the most con-
venient city car and then sit down or
your pocket-book.
1 have spoken, and l have nothing
more to say about it unless 1 make pub.
lie an idea which just strikes me, as q
copy of Boccaccio's Decameron-ab ool
much praised by the classic critics
though do not now remember to have
seen it brought out for family reading
meets my eye on neighboring shelf
While the panic is raging, why would
it not be a good idea for lotteries o
bankers and brokers'" by way o
diverting the mind and getting little
innocent amusement, to retire, say t.
Hoboken, with select companies o
ladies, and tell stories till all's over
And certainly almost any "banker ant
broker mo need to pick your man
could keep the sweetly flowing fund o
anecdote going for a twelvemonth o
more. without even n " momentary Sis