The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1866-1891, 1873-01-02
OUR CHIP-BASKET.

Persons given to Observation-Disclosures
cts.
Mean time-The time when ones note
falls due.
When is young lady very like whale !!
When she's pointing.
Whiskey is said to be horn Of plenty,
because.it will corn you copiously.
,Thackerays daughter is the queen Of the
literary circle Of London.
Anger your friend, and you will be sur
prised to find what villain you are, even in
his estimation. = 4
IF this is borrowed paper you are read
ing, "dropit" Your neighber don't pay
his money to lend to you.
Why is the bridegroom worth more than
the bride? Because she is given away and
he is sold.
The most popular visitor to the printing
Office just now is the man who shuts the
door.
A Connecticut boy received q dollar for
learning 800 Bible verses, and has boug ght
with il a handsome deck of linen-back cards.
What did that young leady mean when
abe said to her lover: "You may be too
late for the cars; but you can take
buss."
A watering place correspondent writes
that "very few bathers bathe at the West
End" whereupon Mrs. Partington says she
chad an idea they bathed all over"
An indiscreet youth in Cairo has been
fined for violently kissing the school ma'am.
She was so homely that the judge said there
was absolutely no excuse for him.
"Homc is the place for boys" said Spinks
to his eldest pride and joy. eyes" said the
youngster, dutifully; "I like to stay at home
all the time, but ma sends me to school,"
There have been many definitions ofa gen.
tleman, but the prettiest and most pathetic
is that given by young lady. GA gentle
man." says she, sis human being combin-
ing a wOman's tenderness with mans cour-
age"
"Friend, will you loan me your umbrella.?"
"No. cannot" "Why?" "Well, you see
if it rains I'll need it myself; if it don't you
will not need it."
A pupil in one of the public schools re-
Gently revised an old saying found in his
grammar, es follows: "It is botter to give
than to receive-a good licking"
Why was Noah bad mouser =? Give it up.
Because it as forty days and forty nights
before he found airy rat (Ararat.)
"Who was the meekest man, my son ?"
said the superintendent of boys Bible
class. ")Ioses, sir" "Very well, my boy;
and who was the meekest woman? 2" "Please,
sir, there never was the meekest woman"
A bad marriage is like an electric ma
chine, it makes you dance, but you can't let
go.
Savannah has colored dramatic troupe
billed to play "Noble Thieves" for the ben
eft of the Second African Baptist church
of that city.
A Wisconsin newspaper man has deter
mined to call convention Of his delinquent
subscribers to take action upon his bankrupt
condition.
A faithful brother in Fairfield, Connec-
ticut church recently prayed for the absent
members "who were Frustrated on beds Of
sickness and chairs of wellness."
Titusville girls, with an eye to matrimo-
NAL matters, stain their fingers with shoe
bronze, and, when their gentlemen acquaint-
ances ask the cause of the same, softly whis-
per, have been helping mother to put up
canned fruit"
An Irish lass wrote to her lover, begging
him to send her some money. II am so
ashamed of the request have made in this
letter that sent after the postman to get it
back, but the servant could not overtake
him."
An Irishman, referring to the sudden
death of relative, was asked if he lived
high. "Well can't say he did" said Ter
renee. but he died high" Like the banks
in these days, he was suspended.
A Dutchman getting excited over an ac-
count of an elopement OF married woman,
gave his opinion thus :. "Ifmy wife runs away
NIT anoder mans wife, shake him out his
prceches, if she pc mine fadder, mine Go" "
A swearer hos no more right to stick his
blasphemy'in the ears Of other people than
he has to stick his nasty tongue in another
persons glass of water. and if he is gen.
tlemap he will not do the one sooner than
he will the other.
The following conversation, it is said, oc-
Cured at the State House day ordwo ago ::
Good morning, Parker, said Tim Hurley,
addressing the State Treasurer; how are you
this morning?
am poor y, thank God, said Parker. but
I haven't got the epizootic yet.
! I lo,on't hna,d ~ nf-