Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1873-03-13
NAsBY AND TEMPERANCE.
. [From the Toledo Blade.1


TO KILL HIS INFLUENCE.
CoNTEpER1r Z Roads,
(wich 10 In the State NV Kentucky,
Feb. 20, 1873. J
The Corners is Vaughn on ez yoosual.
Deekin Pogram, bless his old soul, is the
same kind, genial old man that he alluz
wuz. But time hez plowed deep furrers
in hiz cheeks, and the tech Nv hiz frosty
fingers hez whitened hiz hair, and chilled
the warm currents Nv hiZ blood. But the
Deekin is resined. A more philossifical
nacher never knowd. He SEE that age
hez its advantages, ez well ez its disad-
vantages. Troo, his blood is colder than
in youth, but ez compensation he hez
to drink more likker. The pleasure Nv
takin the warmin fluids more than COM
pensates for the disadvantages Nv age.
But" SEE l, "sposin your finances
your regler supplies"
There is the silent tomb for me-" sed
he. there is death"
"After wich," replied Joe Bigler, ''yoo
will doubtless be kept warm enough with
out likker."
That Joe Bigler alluz puts in unpleasant
remarks at the wrong time.
The Corners hav bin threatened with
serious disasters for some weeks back.
Pollock and Joe Bigler, fur the express
purpose Nv worryin the saints, hev bin
tryin to organize temperance society
and Sunday School, and that sort Nv
things at the Corners, witch we steadfast-
ly opposed. They wanted a series NV
temprence lectures at this place, by q
temprence missionary sent out by the
Nashnel Society, and when they adver-
tised him, we sent a note to 'em that we
never could permit an innovashen that
wuz intended to sweep away all the an
sient landmarks. and revolutionize the
Corners, and that while we believed in
free speech ez the inalienable right Nv
Ameriken citizens, eff that man attempted
to speak at the Corners, we'd hang him
to the first Treasure.
That afternoon, Joe Bgler came to me
and took me to one side.
''Parson," sed he, "we'are agoin to hev
at least one temprance lecture in the Cor
ners."
at will be our painful dooty to hang
the lectrer," sed l, ''for Bascom desires it.
Its interferin with his trade and our
rites"
'Parson," sed Joe, with wink and a
leer, "ain't 700 often sick for want Nv
drink"
81 am" sed +.
isn't it difficult to git all 700 wants"
sed he.
cit is" sed l.
"What wood 700 give for strate week
Nv all 700 Good lay to-free hkker in
short?"
81 shood be willin to die the next day."
l replied, "die with neetnis and dispatch.
But why torment me with SIGH visions of
Elysian bliss, witch are simply nnattain-
able?"
''Parsong spose Deekin Pogram wuz to
say to Bascom, that these meetins Good
ent be stopped, and that the only way to
nootraliZe their effect, wuz to keep the
Corners from attendin by maxim his bar
free durin their continyooance. Spose,
eff he didn't bite at the beginin, that a
dozen Nv 700 go to the meetin one mite
and not go near his place. I don't want
goo to do this, tor ez 700 never pay moth
in, yoor absence wood please him-but
McPelter, Issacher Gavitt and sum NV
that kind, who hev land yet to mortgage
That'll fetch him-that'n fetch him.
| seed a lite. Visions of unlimited
drinks rose before me, and l sed to him.
Joseph, it shell be done. Announce
yoor lectrer in safety. hate his senti
mence, Joseph but free speech is the
hCi ihaSC anu DouSt Nv tFcIy 1IStUlC1, anu
it shell not be violated at the Corners.
Advertise him in peace"
imejitly went to the Deekin, McPelter
and Gavitt, and opened to them the idea,
and they fell into it to wunst. 1t wuz re-
freshin to see the look NV expectancy on
their bloc lips and their wan faces was
deppytized TO make the sejestion to Bas-
com, witch imejitly did
laid before G. w. the impossiblity
of checkin the movement now bein inog
gerated by Bigler and Pollock, and the
danger that wuz conceded in it, | told
him that only by keepin the people NV
the Corners away from the accused fanat-
les, coed their work be made fruitless,
and that only by THROWN open his house
and by putin up notice, "Likker is free
here" could they be kept away
Bascom larfed out and refoosed.
Whereupon l sed very well, and left.
1mmejitly l got the party together.
"Bascom hez refoosed," remarkt, "ez
/ sposed he wood Now fur severe mea.
sures. You must all go to the temperance
meetin to-nite, and must stop in after it's
over, and refoose to drink, or the score
that you've bin impressed"
go without likker one whole evenin!
Parson, we can't do it."
Here WIZ an impeachment wien , he'd
overlooked. Wv course they couldent 90
without likker hull evenln But genius
is ekal to all emergencies-beine kal 10 all
emergencies is what constitoots genius.
We he'd farmer go to Bascom's aud buy
a gallon.
Then Deekin Pogram remarked that
probably he had better not go to the
meetin, but wood stay and take keer Nv
that jug, but they all sed "No" unani-
mously, and each made the same propo-
sishen witch wuZ towunst rejected by the
others. Finally, the Jug wuz put in
charge Nv Mrs. McPelter, who can't
drink, OWN to her hevin no stomach wat !
ever to speek Nv, and she wuz charged to |
put 1T under lock and key, and to git it |
out for nobody onless we all wuz present, |
so that there Good be no advantage taken. |
This bein done, they all took one sniff, |
one witch wood sustain EN- for an hour, |
and went to the lekter, levin me with |
Bascom.
Eight and nine passed, but not one Nv |
EN- come to his old familiar place. Bas-
com wuz Uneasy. | took suthin hot with |
him twice or three times, and talked Nv |
the weather and things, but they came not.
Finally, at 911a they entered, lookin grave |
and solemn
"Deekin, McPelter, Issaker, will YOU |
take suthins" sed I, displaying a dollar |
note witch the Deekin he'd given me tor
the purpose.
Nor sed the Deekin, 81 am not shoor |
about drinkin. | hev listened to a now. |