The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-11-01
WIT AND HUMOR.

est:' asked a young man the other day
of friend. "Oh, you ought to try 1t
once and see!' was the reply.
A woman in Litchfeld, ILL.,, set all
her neighbors laughing last fall by sew
ing up her peach trees in bed-ticking.
The fun isn't over yet, for now she has
an orchard full of peaches, while the
neighbors have not single one.
"Mother sent me-" said little girl
to neighbor, "to ask you to come and
take tea with her this evening" did
she say at what time, my dear::" "No,
ma am; she only said she would ask you,
and then the thing would be off her
mind-that was all she said. -- .
An Indiana man claims to have Sue
ceeded in playing thorough confidence
game upon the potato-bug. He plant
ed grain of corn in each potato hill,
and as the corn came up first, the bugs
thought it was a corn field, and started
for other scenes.
mamma, don't forget to ask papa
about going to Brighton for fortnight"
"Hush, dear! I'm afraid it won't do!
You know how dreadfully the seaside
upsets papa for the first week always"
eyes, but papa needn't come down till
the second week, you know!'
A chap who in some mysterious man
ner had received a bid to a large and
fashionable party was somewhat discon-
certed to find that he was not acquaint-
ed with single person present, nor
double one either. Finally he perceiv-
ed an elderly gentleman of disconso-
late mien looking over Photographic
album. Our hero made for this party Of
the second part and said: 81 say, you
and l don't seem to know any body
here. Let'sgo home" 1t was the head
of the house.
1t is related of Scottish lady in a
remote part of the Highlands, noted for
her profuse liberality, that being some
times over burdened with habitual
"sorners," when any of them outstaid
his welcome, she would take occasion
to say to him at the morning meal, with
an arch look at the rest of the company,
"Mak'a guild breakfast, Mr., while
ye're about it; ye dinna ken whaur
yell get your dinner" The hint was
usually taken, and the ''sorner" depart
ed.
John Varnum, Jr., is a practical jok-
er. A few Sundays ago, in returning
from church, he was conversing with
his wife on the subject of the sermon,
and remarked that he couldn't believe
saint and sinner ever dwelt so near as
the sermon represented. His wife init
mated that they could, and instanced the
following case: Haven't you and l
dwelt in the same house for years."
This was a square hit on John, but he
wormed out of it, and closed the case
with the following argument; "Yes, to
be sure; but did ever call you sinner"
Judgment for John and no appeal.
A SHAKER BARN.-It is the grand
est and completest barn have ever seen.
1t is only one story on the street, and
three high stories in the rear. The con-
trivance for fastening in their places
thirty or forty cows, or one section, by
the movement of a single lever, was
shown. The devices for saving every
particle, solid and liquid, of the fertiliz-
ers, the railroads for conveying all this
to an immense vault in the rear, where,
from curious cars tipping on either side,
the manure is thrown down wherever it
may be wanted,-all these things were
shown to US. While looking down
into the great manure vaults, and exam
lining the semi circular railways, and the
arrangements overhead for hitching
down the wagon loads of absorbents
which were driven in on a level from the
street, and, reaching the far off back
end, were dumped into the vault fifty
feet below, Elder Frederick remarked:
Il have never undertaken anything
which involved more thought than this. :"
The ventilation was explained. A
current of fresh air comes constantly to
the head of each animal. The feed-box
for each creature ian original contriv-
ance of the elder was shown and mani
pulated. In brief, this immense and
wonderful home of the horned animals
was shown and explained in a spirit
which showed plainly enough that FL
der Fredrick thought they were all Shak-
ers, every one of them, and deserved
the best.
While we were at the top ofthe barn,
our guide took us out on the roof to
show US the views l do not know
where in the world anything more grand
and beautiful can be found. We were
in the bottom of circular nest, two or
three miles in diameter, the mountains,
everywhere covered in wonderful green,
rising above us. That very plain dress
which the Elder wore may serve some
! good purpose, but his face plainly show
ed that one of US, at least, was full of
/ the lovely scene around and about u.s.
My companion suggested that the choice
of location was exceedingly fortunate
for the undisturbed solution of the great
social problem which the Shakers had
undertaken. Elder Fredreick's little