davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

"Havn't got the currency, Jamesey.' re-
sponded the burn!shcr, "but can give YOU a
certified check"
man spoiled a new hat the other night and
nearly stove in his head attempting to ascend
flight of cellar stairs which had closed I'D
while lie was away from home, His hat looked
like discouraged accordeon.
named Elwell, at Putnam, Conn.,, braes
that all the furniture and flooring of his house
Is made of live oak, but his wife, who does
the hard work Of the house says it's nothing
but scrub oak.
a smart man of Sandusky put arsenic in a
bottle OF wine, hoping that a burglar would
drink 1t, and his wife placed it among 100 9th
er bottles. The smart man is now wondering
which is the bottle.
Parish Feeling-A melting sermon being
I preached in a country church, all wept except
one man, who being asked why he did not
| weep as well as the rest -"Oh!" replied be,
81 belong to another parish"
In these days Of retrenchment 1t is wonder E
| ful TO hear Of the extravagant dress Of an Afr-
can Chief on the Gold Coast. Hrs wife has
aunnted him with palm oil and powdered him
with gold dust.
In letter to friend, Springfield young
lady states that she is not engaged, but she secs
clord above the horizon about the size of u
| Iuhu uauus
The newest style of boys trousers, which are
copper fastened, and plated at the knee TO dety
| friction, are known as the 'Kpee Plus Ui-
| tra.'
| The District Attorney of Dallas, Texas, Is
only paid when he convicts. His appeals To the
jury are terrific, and as he has large family
| they have double force.
A Georgia "cracker" was offered four dollars
per day to labor, when lie exclaimed; Sir,
dye s'pose I'd work when I've Just discovered
| a fresh coon track"
| As so many articles in every day use are
manufactured of paper, it was asked it paper
beefsteak cannot be Invented to take the place
of the leather ones.
| A good-natured splnster boasts that she al
ways has two reliable besus at handel
bows.
The man who sang, 80, breathe no more
| that simple air. went into tho smoking car
| W here the air is more mixed"
| What is the difference between cloud aud a
beaten child? One pours with rain, and the
other roars with pain.
A Fort Plain merchant adveftises his goods
at oxyun. That man has always steered clear
of the new, lpers.
To keep warm on a cold day, the women
double the Cape aud the men double the Horn
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

a wife OF nearly ten years having given /lier
s'a servant holiday, and hearing Ter husband
,oii III Inc Kitchen, thought she wou Id sur
throwing her hands over his eyes and imprin,
,'ng KISS oD his brOs, as in the days OF the
honeymoon. The husband returned The salute
WIN IN crest, ami asked, as he diseng lged
her hands, MARY. darling, where's your MS
tressy The wife discharged MARY, darin.,'
surprising her husband. F" "
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

Gan you tell me where Mr.. Smith live, Mis-.
yer omlth.Smth-wha Smith, there are a
names. is Smith, pA'S' "y
Why, don't know his t'other name but has
q, 4 sour, grabbed, and cross sort offs fellov and
,hy ,hhey caii him Grab Smith, 'Oh suppose I'm
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

andrew jackson once making sturup
speech IN country village out we st. Just a,
,ia ne was concluding, Amos Kendall, who sat
Iieneral, they won't be satisfied without i, !,
ne hero OF New Orleans instantly thought Of
lew phrases he knew, and in a voice of tbun.
oer, wound up his speech by exclamipe, "F
piu,ious unum, Sine quanon, Ne Illus ultra
Multum in parvo." f'"' "''a'
could be heard for miles, N'u's
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

The monitor Manhattan was surveyed at VIII
mipston, Del, on Tuesday, BY board con
slsting of Captains Beaumont and Harris, Con
strucor Hart and Chief Engineer Stamm, and
$ g was pronounced utterly unfit for Use as u
man-ot- war in her present condition. Chief En-
Qineer Smith of the Manhattan, is re-
ported TO be very i'll from having been oblil
ed to "work in water" last Thursday week and
the other men of the monitor are said to be suf.
fering from the flooding oftheir quarters.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

me following dagueTeotype of his Sata III,
Mslesty was given BY negro preacher in i ir-
ginia to his "colored breddren:''
otah' side, nigsers, let me tell you l bab a
cream, aiid see de debbill! He hab an eve Ike
ae noon he hab nose like a canoe; he hab an
,;a. same as ,oacca leaf; he had a shoulder
rainbowP ~'' i'm" us
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

Governor Leslie, of Kentucky, sent his me =
sage to the State Legislature of that
State on Tuesday. He strongly condemns the
lawlessness existing in some counties Of Ken
tuckv, says lie has no authority to call out the
militia, as IL would conflict with the regular
constabulary force Of the disturbed district, and
recommends that a commissioner be appointed
TO 90 10 the di,orderly district aud secure the
arrest of those gully of Ku-Kluxism or c. mil
vance 18th 1t. The Governor also recommer ds
the establishment Of system Of schools for the
education of colored children.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

MEETING AFFLlCrIoN The only way To
meet anictlou is to pass through it solemnly,
slowly, with humility and faith, As the Israel.
ties passed through the sea. Then its very
waves 5 of misery will divide, aud become TO us
a wall on the right side ana OH the lefi, until
the gulf narrows before our eyes, and we land
safe on the opposite shores. - Miss Muloch.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

" young lady in Lancaster has the initials
visiting cards. which she hands TO certain aou au'
,,enen visitors. AT first they supposed She be-
i9nsed to the Young Mems Christian Assocj.-
.ioii' ont 1t was not long before they rightly
Come Again" y" MAY
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

Thomas" said father to bis son, "don'
l that girl make q fool of you. Look sharp
Remember the adage, that love is blind" 40
That adage won't wash said Tom; "talk about
love being blind! Why, see ten times as mucl
i'll that girl as YOU do"
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

a michigan switch-tender, caught manning
al ms post, and convicted of wiful neelipencee
said M 10 the jai'or who was about to lock him
up' raa,. Always supposed that the safety Of rail-
ers" "So it does" retorted the ser s,ep ..i',i,
such sieepers are never safe unless boiled in .
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

from Lsavenworth comes the terrible story
mo her-in-law the other night bv Jsnc;,r
p1'hl with her unti. sue got thoroughly warm
en rEiu ins has AL a4.j La..,..
young mar, who, in passing, stepped upon
her d:ess. Turning tc the lady, he iemai ked
"Hoops take up too much ROOM" To which
the lady replied, "Not so much as whisky, sil =
and passed on.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

-, Inc proprietor OF a young ladies' academy In
Illinois has utterly ruined his business by cans
ing To be inserted in iarge number OF papers
a picture Of the building with two girls stand
ing on the balcony with last years hats on
their heads.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

peculiar way of dischargiLg bril- tiers exists
in Dayton, o. Offices. Each composi,or has A
nail to hang his coat on, and when the foreman
TO dispense with the services of one
OF the hands, lie takes hammer and drives the
nail in 10 the head.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

FORGOT TO GRoAN.-lt Is well rendered by
army officers that of the yari us deIicacies iis.
tributed by civilian delegates OF the yarions
commissions and relief agencies, the major part
were obtained by class of patients who made
sickest INV
II was after Gettysburg, when the corps hos
Pltal were crowed with wounded, that while
uiess,og siisnt wonnd, patient started ap,
as delegate of the Christian Commissino nass,
ed the tent, and asked
"Warnt that Christian,
"Yes.r
"Jove! but for got to grouM Well that 1,
.he brst OF them I've missed vet. / ,vondey
,ohdt he had'' "O"0e'
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

An elderly millionaire, being pestered with
all manner OF applications for money, says, .sI
was good-natured once but beg to state In the
most positive terms that am now old, tired,
very illnatuied, and want that fact generally
known"
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08
FIRST AND ALLMON,
CORNER OF SEVENTH AND SHIPLEY 81

WILMINGTON, DELAWARE,
.RDk, Inform their old customers and the public
@si In general, that they have hSad and
make to order,
CARRIAGES OF EVERY DESCRIPTION
and warranted g be Of the best quality, which they
Repsing and painting promptly attended to In
- Second hama arriasss siwars on hand st y
Prices
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

"itess on, young mau, though you are
poor" We knew youth who with only his
two hands and crowbar opened jewelry
store, and now he Is living in fine stone resi-
dence in Sing Sing.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08
HVM0ROU9.

THE following Is declared by the St Cloud
lAinnesota) Journal TO be strictly true: ga
lady stopped recently at one OF the Chicago
hotels with her little son. The boy was not
perfectly satisfied with matters and things at
the dinner table, and expressed himself fire.
quently TO that effect. The mother finally rose,
ana remarked In an undertone to the youthfnl
offender, Come with me up stairs, and l will
attend to your case.' The lad understood at
once what attending to his case' meant, but
There was an important matter of detail which
ne was painfully anxious to have more fully
explained; so pulling backwards on the har d OF
MS mother he blubbeIei out, in voice loud
enough to be heard over most ofthe well filled
ainihg room Say mother, are you going to
take your hand or your ipper3 The enthnsir.
asm with which this brief address was receiy-
EN- was unbounded.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

4, NE beNDLE of CALF-SKISs.-A Pbila
u1iphlt Quaker, who was tanner once dream
su ,, tliat lie was at religious meeting wherein
ne was surprised TO observe the congreratjo,
WIN tables before them, at which thew wer,
all pursuing tltir usual OCCUPATIONS ~.
merchant was busy with hls books. the re,. ;a,
tools. WIN "'s
ilh ;nant al such employ nent among ue,.
sons ploirs"dly assembled isr the solemn woI-
snip OF God, he was about Using to administer
70 .lieh Il sharp iepruOf, when, ncdeptalIv
piacins his ba Ids behind him, he found n b,,o
I Ms v cnJ-'6ins suspended from his own shout.
,, ue's' We may easily suppose that he deferred
ms eShoraion, and took To him self a portjon
o. tlie repIoot which seemed 10 be implied in
IL we could see the inner thoughts of all who
gather for worship, the vision might be as re- =
,narKa1le as was his dream. Muititudes come
s ~ lhe to.'sn OF prayer, while thoughts of wor-
snip are Tie far hest from their hears. And
III any othcrs, who, II may be, come with eood
intent, ind their minks wandering, like The
iools eyes, 10 the ends Of the earth = tn
Christidn. me
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

"Pay me that twenty-five cents you owe me-
'oared newsboy to boot black.
"Havn't got the currency, Jamesey,' re-
sponaed the burn!shcr, "but can give you a
certified check"
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08
RELIGIOUS.

THAT'S ME "'-Sitting down in the Or
phanage grounds upon one of the seats. w,
were talking with one of the trustees. when =
illtle fellow, we would think about eight yea rs
OF age, left the other boys who were plsvinp
around us, and came deliberately up to us Hs
opened fire upon us thus.
Please, Mister SpuIgeon, [ want to come
ana sit down on that seat between YOU and
that ellleman.'
want ""a' 'o''
ilease, MIR. Spurgeou, SUPPOSE there was n
ilttie boy who had no father, who lived i'm an
'Orphanage with lot Of other little bows who
hid no fathers, and suppose those httie bows
had mothers and aunls who came once a nonih
ahd brought them apples aud oranges. and gave
tnein pehhie5 and supl ose this little boy had
io 'hothef ana no aunt, and So nobody never
.ahr . l" bring him nice thiags-dont Won
,mn ,l'nh somebody ought TO give him penny p
oause, Mr. Spnrgeon, that's me-"
- 9olnebody felt something wet his eve. and
ooo eot a slxpence, and went OIL in great
state oil delight. Poor li.tle soul, be had seized
yne opportunity to pour out a bitterness which
hau ranked in his little Leart and made him
miserable when the monthly visiting day came
around and, as he said, "Nobody never came
10 Drlng him nice things"
lurning the tables, We think some prown.,n
persons, VINO were once Bubs and Ha,rvs
iu iSht say ''Suppose there was Door sinner
IL" observed 10 he sent to hell, but who was
forgiven all his sins by sovereign fr,ca ana
maue child of God, don't YOU think he onsh,
10 neip The Savlour's cause? Cause Mr. Sn,'r1
se"n that S sne."--Spnugeon.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

Trains leaving wilmington, at 1880 A. M. con meets
with train leaving Philadelphia at $50 a. ii.
Train leaving Wilmington at b.35 Z. NJ. connects
with train leaving Philadelphia at 400 =. NJ.
Train arriving at Wilmington .55 A. NJ. connects
with tram for Philadelphia ut BIO A. NJ.
Train arriving at wilmington at $50 p. NJ. with
tram for Philadelphia at 4.0O l.. NJ.
Omnibus transfer between w. & w. and p. W. Il
Is. DepOts ami of Wilmington City r. r., at Front
and Market Sts., by MuMullep q Seal at cents for
each passenger and cents for each piece of baggage.
Ocr 3i-tf DAVID CONELI, SupI.
w. II. CONNELL. General Agent.
Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-12-08

IN - wfiminE...,n. ,s.s and hs"ains
SrMMER ARRANG EMENT.
On and after Sunday, JUNE, 22d, 1873, Pas
,enger trains will leavt sOuthwsrd as folio.s;
TRAINS Nos. 4. 4. u.
pm "a I'll.
~ Birdsboro sos 43O
'' Coatesville 9.3s G.lU GO
" Chadd's Ed l0.I0 III 7.J0
Arr. Wilmington 1l.3U 800 Sl5
., TRAINS A LEAVE NoKTHwAKD
ras9 am. pm. pm.
Leave Wilmington C30 800 300
Chadd's Ford 7e6 $50 coo
U0atesville u 10 40 100
Arr. BrdsbOio 965 636
" Reading 1920 1.lO
CONNECTIONS.
At Wilmington, with trains to Philadelphia and
and make direct connection with trains to and
FROM Washington.
At Chadds Ford, trains Nos 1, Q, 8 and for Phila-
dephia- Nus. and with trains from Philadelphia.
Trains Nos. I, and with trains for Port Deposit.
At CoAtesv lille, all trains connect with trains for
Philadelphia and Harrisburg. Trains Nos. 2 and 3
make direct connection with trains to and romP hila
delphia.
At Birdsboro' trains and 3 connect northward and
southwark with Philadelphia and Reading Railroad,
and and with southwar bound trains. Train No.
Oxforu and Philadelphia via Chada's Ford.
Connection by stage TO and from West Chester at
Sayer's with ali trains.
Trains do not stop ~ stations where figures are
omitted. G. STOLE.
nov Il General Superintendent
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08

the Uade mecuna-the ever welcome and
always present friend of the American
citizen. In such a country as this, it is
no wonder that the newspaper consti-
tutcs the grand university of the people,
and while the exclusive reading of these
journals may be far from wisdom. the
frequent and universal perusal of them
is highly complimentary both to the
American press and to the citizens Of
our country. Let some men affect to de-
spise it as they will, nevertheless, there
is, in our land, to-day, no greater power
for good or ill, if we except the living
ministry Of the gospel, than that Of the
newspaper which enters every hamlet
and dwelling, and approaches all eyes.
Why. then, are not all good men and
women who would have their own fami-
lies and the youth of the land trained
up Alright, liberal and earnest to the
verge of profusion, for the support and
circulation of pure principled, able and
well-conducted newspapers both secular
and religious /?
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08


In HoT WEATHER.-If during the
hot weather, people after becoming heat
ed and fatigued with work or exercise
of any kind, eat freely of cabbage, green
peas and beans, melons, cucumbers,
green apples, and similar articles, the
probability is that in few hours they
will think they are attacked with genu-
inc Asiatic cholora Unwholesome diet
induces cholera morbus; exeesses of any
kind at this season invite disease and
death. The market constantly abound
in unripe or overripe or decayed fruit
and vegetables. offered for sale cheap.
The purchasers fall easy victims to dis
ease of any kind. Moderation, pru-
dence and cleanliness in all. things ale
the best safeguards against summer all
ments of every kind-the best prevent
ives against the fatality of any pesti-
lence which may invade the great city.
Caution, not fear, is what the public
should exercise, as the mortality IN
creases with midsummer heat.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08

The Government has decided to give
the Modoc murderers quick transit to
reservation they had not stipulated for,
and from which white men will not be
likely 30 drive them. Hemp has a qui-
citing effect when applied halter wise, and
the spectacle of wholesome hanging
may have wholesome effect upon the
turbulent Reds, who have no special OBJ
lection to shooting or being shot, but
had quite as soon die as be hung any
time. AS the Government has treated
the Indians to about everything else,
from bad whisky to bad faith, patting
them one day and pelting them the next,
now giving them rifles and then rife
balls, caressing them at Washington and
hunting them down like wild beasts on
the Plains, it may be we'll to give them
small dose of hanging, just by way oi
experiment It can't be any worse fol
them than some of the things they have
had already, and will give them an en-
larged idea of the resources of the Gov
ernment. If few Indian contractor
and depredators were gallowsed at th'
same time, it would add materially t.
the picturesquencss of the exhibition,
mt to its Justice
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08

UNPLEASANT DISCOVERY BY AN EDI-
ToR.-The publishers of the Petersburg
(Va) Appeal recently purchased and
united with their paper the Iuder, pub
lished in the same city, and few days
after Maj. Venable. member Of the
purchasing firm, began an examination
of the material in the latter Office, with
view to disposing of what was not
needed. One result is thus told by the
Appeal: "His attention was called to
a large marble slab, used as an imposing
stone. and upon examining it he found
on the other side the inscription 1--WE
omit names) Sacred to the memory of
youngest daughter of-and",
born July 26, 1929. Died Both October,
1916, aged seventeen years. three months
and four days This was followed by
the fourteenth and fifteenth verses of
the seventh chapter of Revelations.
Maj. Venable recognized the name as
that of a very near young lady relative,
whom he remembered while living.
Upon making inquiries DO one could give
him any information as to how the
slab was obtained or when it was brought
into the Office
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08
ssDON,T STAY LONG.o


o, why do thy sweet steps delay.
Since bird and song and breeze are gone?
Sighted for hope of thee. the dayI
Without thee night puts sackcloth onl
Were away thou shouldst not chide
One needless moment of delay;
l seek my sunshine at thy side
Thy voice my song. thy smile my day.
Don't stay long, husband" said
young wife tenderly in my presence, one
evening. as her husband was preparing
to 60 out. The words themselves were
Insignificant, but the look of melting
fondness with which they were accom-
panied spoke volumes. It told all the
whole vast depths Of a woman's love-
of her grief when the light of his smile,
the source of all her joy, beamed not
brightly upon her.
Don't stay long. husband" and /
fancied | saw the loving, gentle wife
sitting alone anxiously counting the mo-
ments of her husbands absence, and ev-
cry few moments running to the door to
see if he was in sight, and finding that
he was not, thought could hear her
exclaiming in disappointed tones. .'Not
yet
.Don't stay long, husband and
again thought ! could see the young
wife. rocking nervously in the great arm
chair, and weeping as though her heart
would break, as her thoughtless ''lord
and master" prolonged his stay to a
wearisome length of time.
s.Don't stay long, husband" and the
young wife's look seemed to say--for
here in yonr own sweet home is loving
heart, whose music Is hushed when you
are absent; here is soft breast to lay
your head upon. and here are pure lips
unsoiled by sin, that will pay you witt
kisses for coming back soon.
o, you that have wives to say "Don'
stay long, when you go forth, think o
them kindly when you are mingling il
the busy hive of life, and try, just lit
tie. to make their homes and hearts hap
Ply, for they are gems too seldom re
placed. You cannot find amid the pleas
ures of the world the quiet JOY that
home blessed with such woman's pres
ence will afford.
Husbands, would you bring sunshin
and JOY into your homes ? Then spen
your leisure hours with your families
and employ the time in pleasant word
and kind actions and you viii rnalize i
all its richness what is so beautiful
described by the poet:
Domestic happiness, thou only bliss
OfParadse that has survived the fall
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1873-09-08

High tlme-A town clock.
Goldsmith Maid is sweet sixteen.
Long Branch is troubled with leaves.
Massachusetts is now called the Back
Pay State.
Libby prison is being used by fer
tilizing company.
The new Golden Rule-To get all the
gold you can.
admiral Semmes is now commodore
of a trunk factory.
The tea-kettle is the only singer that
never gets cold.
What an old wag said to new bal
loon-You be blowed.
Never trust a man who wears his hat
on the back side of his head.
The only cheap rooms in New York
just now are mushrooms.
Gold is lower. Wish some of our
subscribers would hand in a little.
Connecticut farmers expect to have a
fne-cut Of tobacco this fall.
There are plenty of deer in Orleans
county-only they are dear girls.
Josh Billings says it is impossible for
a man to do anything we'll when a flea is
about except swear.
There are men in Wall street N. Y.
who have more gold than they can carry
Lucky dogs.
The Siamcse twins have been sum.
moned to sit on a jury. They will sit
next to each other.
A young lawyer in an interior city ont
morning early locked his office door and
left upon it this mysterious legend =
"Gon to brexfus.''
The editor of Nevada newspape
gives notice that he cannot be bribet
with a five cent cigar to write FIVE dol
lar puff.
There is as much difference betweel
se!f-conceit and self respect as there i
between selfish men and men who sci
|. fish.
Hiram Green, Esq, says: The prop
: er way for ladies to get the right tangl
on their hair is to fill it full of corn mea
!, and let the chickens scratch it.
!. Miss Belle Lee of Georgia has raise
eighty-fve bronze turkeys. and offers t
sell them for FIVE dollars each. The
N should be gobbled up Immediately.
n n 1t is announced that Professor Wis
IS will publish book of aeronautic expt
;, rience before he starts for Europe.
Professor Wise desires to publish boo
. he is wise to publish it before he start
: A captain. finding an Irish boy, du
ing the middle of the watch. frying SON
ham and eggs he had stolen from II
: ships store, called out to him, You la
:, Der, you. I'll have none of that" y
: Faith, Captain, I've none for ye, sa
: the lad.
A Georgia bride is described in one
. tie local papers as Cooking very Ii
cradled in the golden glimmer of sor
evening lake-a foam-feck, snowy, y
:. sun-fushed, crowning the ripplings
some soft southern sea-"
IN An unstamped letter. dropped in t
Springfield post-office was recently fl
warded, as usual, by the Young Mel
]. Christian Association, and reached
destination. On being opened it "
ton found to contain the following: ..Se
vs me another barrel of that GIN