The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1873-12-25
GRAVE AND GAY.

GRAVE AND GAY.
SPRING wATER-April showers.
THE FIRST man Of mark-Cain.
Lip sERvIoE-Tea-cups and saucers.
SoNa of the seeds-Put me in my lit
tie bed.
In our law there is no sin utcruelty.
HAITI.
A NOBLE style can only proceed from
a sincere heart.
WHO has the fewest wants is most
like God.-Socrates.
How did Adam go out of Eden? He
was snaked out.
SOCRATES thought men were gods who
had not found it out
THE theater Uf war is about the only
one where back seats are desired.
ADVICE to surgeons-Keep your tenn
per or you'll lose your patience.
LA CROSSE papers speak of the
schools of that city as "the tanneries."
Oh! 1t was a terrible cough
That carried her of,
And twas a coffin
They carried her off in
ADVICE to horists-Always plant pill
low-slips at the head of your flower
beds.
Do not speak of your happiness to q
man less fortunate than yourself
Plutarch.
B1oBBs insists that eating chestnuts
in the dark doesn't give the worms
fair chance.
No man is always wrong a clock
that does not go at all is right every
twelve hours.
He that wants money, means and con-
tent is without three good friends.-
Shakespeare.
II 81" were IN the sun, and you
C"u'O were out of it, what would the
sun become? Sin.
WIDOWS who cry most are easiest con-
soled. There is nothing like wet wealth
er for transplanting.
A CoNNEorIoUT father has christened
his daughter Glycerine. She will be
good for chapped lips.
A WAC said to an egotistical writer,
"Somebody should take pity on his
readers and put out his Is"
The watch-dog's honest bark is not
heard in Hinsdale, N. Fl. Not canine
lives within the town limits.
EVERY editorial writer on the Boston
Globe wears glasses on the nose, and all
the Louisville writer's under it.
That state Of life is most happy where
superhuities are not required and nee.
essaries are not wanting.-Phitarch.
! oh, lovely MISS Brockett,
| Your eye in its socket
Is bright as q rocket
Just taking its start
And when slyly you cock it
| At me, what a shock it
Sends through my vest pocket
Right into my heart
HUMAN natur IL like COW natur, ha'
known them both tew Civ a good mes'
ov milk, and then kick it over.-JosI
BiNings.
"How is your wife % inquired doc
tor of one of his patients. "She i
dead, I thank you," was the witty ant
wicked answer.
EVERY meal is rescue from one
death and lays up for another; and
while we think a thought we die
Jeremy Taylor.
Low1INEss is the base of every vir-
tue and he who goes the lowest builds
the safest. Ny God keeps all his pity
for the proud.-FcstuS.
IT IS written on the sky, on the pages
of the air, say the Orientals, that good
deeds shall be done to him who does
good deeds to others.
ANNA DICKINSON kept Syracus'
audience waiting half an hour, tn
other night, because her green dres
with trail had not come.
A MODERN thinker says that man.
people will be astonished when the.
get to heaven, by finding angels layin
no schemes to be archangels.
WRrrINa sketch of his life, an Irish
man says that he early ran away fror
his father because he discovered that b
was only his uncle.
PASSION makes the best observation
and the most wretched conclusions. L
is a telescope whose field is so much
the brighter as it is narrower.-Richter,
THE epitath of a resurectionist: The
following jocose treatment OF grave
subject is from BlackwoOd's Magazine
Here lies an honest man, my brothers,
Who raised himself by raising others.
Anxious his friends from soil TO save,
His converse still was with the grave
To rescue from the tomb his mission,
He took mon off to the physician;
And stroye that all, whom death releases,
Should rest. if not in peace, in pieces.
So here he waits his resurrection,
In hopes his life may bear dissection
NOTHING is rarer than solitary lie !;
for lies breed like Surinam toads; you
cannot tell one but out it comes with a
hundred young ones on its back Wash.
ington A,lston.
The panic has reached Utah. Bus
mess men, according to an exchange, ART
reducing their number of wives, ant
/ IL. l.,