The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1873-11-27

----------- $500
From Kowell's Newspaper Reporter]
green-grocer-- one who trusts
Baptist Observation-Disclosures and cistern
Why Is this eoAsinent like milk Because
it's ours.
An Illinois lawyer aavsrtises for the "hairs
OF Rohecca Long" sf
The higher We take the Thermometer up .
mountaia the lower It gets.
Pattin& upa stove-pipe In Daabury 10 pc.
liiely termed attending a black crock mat.
incc."
An elderly lady, endeavoring to post . let
ter in hydrant, 10 spectacle to make an
oyster weep.
On week days you buy yeur music by the
ehect az Sundays yen can have It by the
eheir for nothing.
The Obituary notice Of q Kentucky lady
includes the fsct that her hair was SIX feet
sight inches lo=E.
a man, who Is eulsgised as an energetic
citizen" waS ruA over by . funeral IN Previ-
deHce. X. l., las. wcsk
aash OF lightning vent through the File
Pa. Dispatch Office on the shAfting and knock
ed the devil" down tho cellar.
man on being asked fer an appropriate
Inscription for founding ssylum, proposed:
"Thus far. but no fsrtber."
A Canadian paper refuses to publish ths
valuable productions Of one ofits contributors
at less than Ssven cents line.
Mrs. Sarah NSwcemh. of I!liaeis. recently
ruiaed handsome bsd-poEt by dAAhin0 out
the srAps of her husssnd with 1t.
An old topper by the name Of G,lchrist, hsv-
Ing moved away tr0m Nielsen street, the
ns'ghsors Row want q street lAmp,-Dan6wry
Neps
Why is big advertiser like o sore nnxsr ?
Because he is more thought OF thAn his neigh
bors ? Ne; It's because be lie always ION
hand "
A Tennessee paper tells Of the presentation
to citizen OF Nashville of the "inkstand
used by Gen. Jackson at the battle Of New
Orleans"
One day when Mrs Partingtoa heard the
minister sAy there would be . r1ve In the
new church, she observed tkAt "she knew
who the party was"
An active bachelor Ia Maine claims 10 be
on hundred and TWO years old bat he
makes his own bed" according to . local
paper $40 he must lie "
An editor oncs wrote 1--WE have received
a basket OF strawberries from Er. Smith,
for which he will receive eur csmplms nts,
some OF which are tour inchss N circumIsr-
enco"
lightning SAWS" are announced by some
dealers IN hardware. That people see light
ming during thunder Storm ID plain enough,
hu. Why they Sheuls saw RhtninE IL . prob
lem.
The principal OF 3 young ladies' seminary
up town, whers especial SttentloR is acvored
to doport msnt, was hOrri1 d the Other gay
10 fad The big girls playing ''leSp-treg" in
the backyard.
why" asked a gsvrruesS OF her little
charge, do we pray Ged TO give us our daily
Dread Why don't we ask for four days, or
five day, or a week ~ We want II FRESH
Ieplied the ing nuour child
posiai card WAS received at Portland,
Me. recently, having - dollar bill sewed on
one side OF it, and directly above the bill
was written "It this is stolen. Is will be
after it leaves the Klt'ery post-officn -
man at Princeton College believes ia hav.
Ing "a place for everything and everything In
Its place. He nails hls slippers on the wall
tour feet up, and teen all he has TO do of an
evening Is to wheel up his easy chair in front
OF them.
A restaarateur OF Tsrre Hau'e iSgivInS the
printers OF chat city oyster suppers, ticking
the offices seriatim, In thus casting away
his bivSlvcs, he Oh. ri5hes DE hope of a re. urn
before MAJ days
The DanburV Ne,CS man states that the
panic has so far abstcd as 10 permit an Els
sex street man TO return 20 len cent c,g RS
and he hops in another month. if the bright
ness continues TO increase, to get kis boys
boots half soled.
The editor OF Minnesota paper has a buff
'aio-robe which Was once the property Of The
Siou1 chief, Sou OF the Sun. whereon are
pictured oil his battles, hiA scalps and other
trophies. He is going to DGs it AZ y means to
frghten delinquent subscribers.
A John Bull conv-rsing with an indian
ask"d him 4 he knew The sun never sets ON
the Queens dOminOns "No CAD m. I,