The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1873-01-08
CLIPS.


Won mite. de odder day, ven ! Va
bin awake in my schleep. I hear som.
tings vat | thinks vas not yust right i
my paEn, and ont shumps to bed an
runs NIT de psrn out, aud ven Va
dere eeom, l secs dat nv Dig Rra'
iron mare he vas bin tied loose an.
run NIT der staple off; and sSer VIII,
vii him pack pring, ] yust 90 mucl
pay him as vas bin kushtomery.
The Danbury News man imagine.
this tableau; A small, wretched look
ing house. Outside miserable apol.
ogy for . man. crazed by drink, as.
saulting the door, making the air re.
sound with his curses. Inside thin
pale wsman with wan expression Of
features, pressing one hand tightly
over her heart, and with the other
holding q poker in the FIRE.
The night watchman in an Iowa
factory. whose duty it is to ring the
bell at daylight fer the work, being
suddenly aroused at two o'clock in
the morning BY people going homo
from psrty, mistook the moon for
the sun, rang the bell, and soon had
all the workmen on duty FIVE hours
ahead of time.
Jones and Brown were talking late
ly Of a young clergyman whose preach.
ing they had heard that day, "What
do you think of him ?" ~ think he did
mich better two years ago, ;" said Jones.
"Why, be didn'f preach thea" said
Brown. Jones said, True, that il
what mean"
Here is a story about remarkable
lunch. The Tzeremisch Tartars have
no particular religion. and have an
odd way of excusing this. They cav
that they once had religious book
for their guidance, but one day a cow
came and ate it.
The frat man that parted his hair
in the middle, it is now ascertained.
was boy, and he didn't do it, but
his father parted it for him to shame
him out of some girlish->wavs. He
looked at himself in the glass and
went away and hanged himself.
4 little girl at school read thus:-
"Ihe widow lived on small limbacy
left her by a relatively" "What do
yol call the word ?" asked the teacher:
the word is legacy not lilsbacy," "But
Miss johnson. ma says must say
limb, not Leg"
A young man engaged making
himself attractive to a young lady was
taken with violent fit of coughing.
srd brought up two marbles he had
swallowed when q boy. The young
lady dismissed him. She said she
didn't want To marry a stone quarry,
"po you think il safe, my dear"
said husband to his wife, for me to
take Off flannel when it looks like
spring" Perhaps So" replied she,
"but l never saw any flannel that look.
ed like spring"
A Western paper has this delicate
personal item: "Those who know nice
old Mr.. Wilson, of this place, person.
ally, will regret to hear that he was as.
} saulted in brutal manner last week,
ut was not killed.
ough tells of a stolid man who
told that joke couldn't be
poured into him with a sledge.ham-
.ner' asS>d if people ever did pound
okes into other people with s!edgs-
= want V kpow," said a creditor,
herceiy, "wheA you are going to pay
me what you owe me 2" "When I'm
gsing to pay? Why you're a pretty
fellow. Do you take me for 5roph.
et?"
This company shall never get an.
er cent ofmy money" said an snery
: on railway train. "Hew will
"a travel ?" asked the conductor
'Pil pay my fare to you"
There are SONS people that live
without any design at all, and psss
through the world like straw on a rly.
er-they do not 60 but are carried.
A hypOcrite may spin so fair a
thread that it may deceive hiu own
eyes; he may admire the cobweb and
not know h'qself to be the spider.
Reason re- Tres culture to expand
It. II resemb the FIRE Concealed in
the flint, which My shows itsslf when
struck with the s.eel.
The reignipg belle at fashionable
assembly - Washington lately Great.
ed sensation h. 81 zing her false
teeth out.
Custom is no g. all matter. A Gus.
tom or habit of life does frequently
alter the natural inclination either to
good or evil.
Any one may do casual act Of