The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1873-08-29
YORK HERALD FRIDAY AUGUST g. 1s7a-TRIPLE SHEET

in assuming that then, as now, mankind were
divided into three great classes-the tat the lean,
and that large but unhappy proportion who
are neither one nor the other, but dragged
out miserable existence, nuctuating be-
tween hone and despair, tormented with
the vain vaticination OF reaching an ideal which a
remorseless fate forever denied them. Whatever
difference. in diet there may have been between
the lat and the lean in the early time, very little
was perceptible in their descendants to-day. The
materials digested were the same and il there was
any difference in the appetite and digestion think
the lean men are to be given the preference.
, Heavens and earth how those CLAIMS did disap-
pear Bear IN mind that Shoales, who entertained
the lean had provided not less than 200 bushels OF
the article, while Hooper, who spread the bill OF
lare for the fat, had prepared not more than
thirty. There may indeed, be some truth in the
suspicion that the enormous capability OF the
lean men for getting on the outside OF so formi-
liable pile OF clans In so snort space OF time
was heped 10 some extent by the spirit
OF rivalry and compettion--a spirit which
may have reversed the natural process OF digestion
and set the laws OF health at defiance. There is
no knowing what emulation, properly goaded, will
not accomplish, and the proprietor OF the Grove
Ronse, who has studied leanness in all its phases,
only showed his knowledge OF human nature in
general, and OF lean human nature in particular,
by providing an extraordinary quantity OF clans.
upon them. and that due respect Tor public
sentiment, setting aside all promptings Of ambi-
calculabie quantity of bivalvular dalnties.
WAITING FOR THE CLAN EATERS.
Scarcely had the sun began to cast his beams
upon the boilers OF the locomotives belonging TO
the early morning trains when the Juvenile
population OF NorwaIk turned out en- masse
they thronged around the depot, penetrated
the waiting rooms, climbed trees, hooked them
selves to lamp posts, monopozed the curostones,
and evinced a curiosity to inspect the phenomena
OF morbid anatomy as evinced In an anomalous
aggregation OF muscular tissue which would have
done credit to the FIRST psychologist OF the age. AS
time passed and successive trans brought In the
usual number OF passengers OF the ordinary
the expectant ranks, and nothing but a belief that
their expectations would ultimately be fulfilled
prevented their visiting these wretched beings
lookout for disguised criminal could have
watched WITH keener eye every passenger who
Walk. Here they comet" saere pt they are
at lastW were cries renewed again and again, only
ton as the train swep on and let at the depo
two or three tgnominious human beings of not
more than one hundred and twenty pounds apiece
Even these frail specimens OF humanity were sub
jected to much juvenile sarcasm, and their being
there at all under the circumstances was con-
strucd into signal breach Of that etiquette which
absence OF police 1t Is difficult to say what the
ultimate consequences might have been had the
arrival or the tat men been much longer delayed !;
for the children OF Norwalk are reared, SO TO
speak, under the very shadow of adiposity.
an nsy man n as pas eSapiI exsae s
hundred years ago, who weighed 739 pounds and
measured nine feet round the body and three feet
round the leg They may not know that there are
other cases on record or men who inspired with q
noble ambition and prodgious genius for assimi-
lation, reached the respective weights OF 6OO $50
and 500 pounds. But they are taught from their
earliest years to believe that the Fat Mans clam
bake is the very Christmas or corpulency and that
to miss the chief end OF life and TO lind the rest OF
existence deluslon and snare. Mention ''the
fat OF the land to child of N0rwalk, ana instead
OF picturing to himself that material wealth and
prosperity Of which, It is claimed. The expression
pretation-namely, the fat men of the land s.fat,
being an adjective qualifying "men" understood.
THE FIRST ARRIVALS.
the OngeXpectant crowd were at length re-
warded. At precisely eleven A. M. the local ex
press train stopped at the south Norwalk depot,
which will long be remembered by those who par
ticpated IN it, 1t Will be borne in mind that while
a fat clambake was to be given az Gregory's Point
held at the Grove House. Now, although the ira
dltions or the place are in favor OF fat men, still
inhabitants who have sympathy. with leanness.
Whether they are the "lean-eal' descendants OF
sent leanness into Their souls, do not know, but
certain it is that their feelings are the side OF
physical ratification Between the two factions
there IS an anmOsity as bitter as between
the Colonna and orsih Judge, then, OF the
scene which ensued when, the train stopping, two
figures simultaneously appeared upon the con-
Meeting platforms OF the two cars, one OF whom
was the very beau ideal of righteousness and juicy
bone and tendon. Tne eject Was instantaneous
and overwhelming. shout rent the air, ana
melodlcus whistles mounted to the welkn snrill, as
those with which the BOwery Boy, cracking peanuts,
expresses his admiration at the triumph OF virtue
and the downfall Of vice. "When Greek meets
Greek,n heard classical spectator observe on
my right while German gentleman who had
evidently sat up oil night in order to be on hand in
time rantica yn v. sar sde fat mans and
sion OF the two antagonists-for they were
hardly less--passes my art Envy and heart.
plainly on the face of Ss
gentleman, while supreme dissatisfaction illum
was one large and luxurious dewiap, and the very
crown Of whose head, as ne removed his nat, was
monument to the cushion-creating power OF
those stearic and margaric acids which are the
solid compOnents Of fat. Loud were the cheers and
fierce was the elbOwing Of the constituents OF
sc veral minutes was able to dismount. But engi-
neers wait Tor no man, whatever weight OF opinion
his weight OF person may entltle MIN to. The
locomotive gave sudden whistle, the train gave
sudden lurch, as though Some one had given it an
unexpected nick behind, and the rivals, taken by
surprise and trying to accomplish rapid descent,
were precipitated almost into each others arms.
THE WAY THE THING is DONE.
Comparatively few know what clambake Is.
In ancient times the art OF cambaking was known
to the natives Of Coney Island and to small priv
LEGGED casss of New Workers. In Manhattan it is
did it to-day was in this manner "A bed Of stone,
sixteen by ten feet, was raised on the pebbly
beach. Top OF 1t was placed three cords OF hard
wood. The wood was set on fire, and for two hours
IL burned and burned until the stones were heated
TO the very core and nothing but ashes remained
OF the fuel. The ashes we're raked away, and then
broom finished the process OF preparing the sur
lace of the stones for the reception OF the CLANS.
These were brought palpitatlng IRON the sea-beat
sands and tumbled from bushe baskets down upon
the heated bed. When this was covered over with
many layers OF clams-wnen the foundation, SO to
speak, was laid--bluefsh, weakfsh, cells, Holsters,
canned and cooked chickens, woodchuck, green
corn sweet and common potatoes, crabs and
Holsters were thrown promiscuously on top and on
top OF them was placed, so as to completely en-
velop the bed, canvass coverlet. This was tucked
in all round so as to make the clans as comfortable
as possible and keep them from catching cold.
Over the coverlet was placed great
mass of wet rock weed to supplement
the canvas in keeping the steam from escaping 1t
was use, however,; the steam insisted on
escaping, and the appearance OF the clambake was
precisely like dungh smoking on frosty morn
ing 1t was fun to the fat men, but death to tue
CLANS That was all. The next thing had nothing
to do with the bake, but 1t had everything to do
with the the main purpose OF the day, and that was