davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
, 1873-01-02
CHICAGO DAILY MARKET.
an, !, 1873.

WEDNESDAY EVENING. Jan. l.
nra ALcoiloMwss 2ne. ~ unchanged 04 percent
rRooM c0nN-Th inquiry for hurl aud eta,t
braid continues fair and, owing 10 scarcity. tley ry
ur s Il N ssS tSx Sraa
s%@ Is r IT, d. 10 ss rs sas'ss Srssn
bEASs-A tolershly fa'r demand o1Ists tor beaus.
ns sfpf arg shoe &dS ass E h
At e toQs2so fsir to prime. *2ooas22b; common to
BUTTEn-vsry little trading was done in tnia dc.
local character md confined to tho bettor grates
to 1se25e; s'tsi1y choes aslry packed : ssSsse S
me.nE, to good, 1as22c inferior to co'nnlon bsl7s.
Light, with material variation in lrices which rulo
hrm as follows stark. s6o; LUDLOW, ase Lewlston,
DO siob!s SIC woel a aaS&s, & Gs' Sos' 1''''
qos Rsss et na .fa aafspssa SIsss "
@S5s: rough sayes sia.ooss3ooy; backsd stsves, ~
i7oo N pork and ticice poles ssotpg i5.oo I3;u :
az Elf In mos.te supply
I'd hesss dEls pears It wintes @ Saa SHsss i
Fresh ors quoted firm at as@soc and ehelco pcas
FEATllElt9-Aro in fair demand NJ previous pr!ces.
We quoto: Primo live gteBe ut GatgfBu from nEst
haila; juhbing rrsss 7397sc for assorted feathers;
mi11d feathers. 2545as, according to quality,
d9ne III tAln lnarlet. and prizes were agan quo;;
ed nteady mud unchanged. Wo rorsat our lHt
~ foie%s: 81 osI No. ! wilitcisl, Ss2s@s6o; No.
do. t,:ooass.2s Ne; , trout: st.7ds5.og; No: !
No. bay l!aac9ore! t?.00e97.25; No. ! shore Alls,
81 s5@l bank c"dtish, s5oues5 as; deorgea cos-
lth 5d.ooG507a box hsrrg, Nj. /, J0R33c; hox her
5ing, sealed. 4.n t6s; Columbia Ntser salmon, now
FRUITB tAND y lyTs-1.e,na!n qniet lnt tho a1a-
neaeH d; ranSo @ 9f prse4 nntss tss9s ss nsw
tksloo; r,,sins, t:.6ot39Go; hactLerries, lsw,
lohGllci rasp!mrrIssss 4,54s; lt!te cherries, 2a9
To; do, ,ntxod, esgaAc: Zato enrraltr, 1s73 $40
9c do lB7l, 7Qs7kn; nprlrs. Southern new, aetbhs;
d. Western, bH26hu Michigan, 7Gtdr. NuTs-f,-
hefts, l4Gl5s Alnlonds, Trrr,Kona, 2:ss2si Englsh
]3t4l4r lucals l3:st9 African l'ranusa O., t7r
Wilmington Ica'suts. 7tSs&; Te'.ntsscv ltaUats,
Tttar,
GliEEsE-rl.o .ilr.tp market was inactIyu VI fnr-
mer prceJ w c9Atillse " au9p: New Yulk fatleiy.
, 1873-01-02
Unc1o Dnn. vvolf's. Cano Presentation.

FROM TIC CINCINNATI LpmsBETctGt.
At tho meeting OF tho Finance Commttteo,
yesterday afternoon, Mr. Fitzgerald, the l'resi-
don't OF the board Of Councilmon, surprised
unclo Dan. Wolf by elandIng him ul IN tho COR
nor, and. In tho presence OF tho Committee,
making him the following speech.
Mn: WOLF: On behalf Of your many admirers in
the old and substantial Fifth Ward It affords me OK
trcme pleasure 10 rsosen to you blight, but take
It, singusrly appropriate token Of their regard for
yon as q inan, md thaudtng Uuce Dan. a handsome
gold -healed cane) their appreciation Of your long
aeryices 'n tle hoard u Cocltmen their reprso,
tatlyo. oin thu, air. in hoping that you may loug
sonnne @ as .osyise y" aye ofro no onu aud aAee1
Ut thu rigid aud nilex!ble integrity which has hitherto
sustained your Official stops.
Uncle Dan naa deeply affected by tho pro-
gerald, aud responded AZ follows,
A1m. FnEs1pENr AND GENTLEMEN Aa yom must per-
cclsr, an overwhelmed by ti!A manifestation u your
good VIII to ne-su completely oYUrGUnu may Bny,
NJ To lp utterly unable to nako roSo.se wsrtly nt
Inv urGaatol can only alaurs y0u that nl ttue.
mi fer ts lnurk II calrnrn with which thu viliteI4
u sile ward have Nv loug represented laso To-day
, 1873-01-02

cortan sense. too much HamenesB about these
surprises, 30 ho sat thore with his Int pulled
oyer ilis Dyes, and considered tho Gttuation.
tic heso % sa1 Tort I q Mrs. Mr. + ois a
rubtcd up to him and kiahod him, aud told him
how tho proplot Ind had another vision In which
no vas commanded to zeal simpsons widow to
Then tho Bishop stumbled around among tho
oradoh to Luis writtng-touk, whore ho felt among
the gum ringa and rattloB for his lotter-papor,
and then addressed D noto to brigham, asking
tor Chriatmas. "Tho man munt take mo Tor
foundllng hospital" ho mid. Thon the DiBhor
snw clearly enough that II ho gavo presents ia
tho othor children and not to tho late simpsons,
nouae down on him, fumblo among his ila!r, nud
mako things warm for him. So, repaoking hi.
carpet -bag, ho started ngain for San Fransisco
tor stxty-four more mouth-organs, while Mrs.
nil but tho rod-haircd woman, who WAS up ntnlrs,
and who had to bo aatiaaed with scrooching
goodbye at tho top of, her voico.
On bis way bone, aftor Ills last visit to San
a,sn9seo Tho nsoP ss IL tho e., 6y ho sdo
The stranger was communicative. In tho courso
Of tho conversation ho remarked to tho Bishop
THAT waa mighty pretty lttlo afrair up there
at tho city on Monday
,, why, tn, that +, Wedding; S Moarath's widow,\y
"You don't say," roplicd tho Bishop. "Idldnt
know that McGrath was doad."
"Yos; diod on Sunday, md tlat night Brigham
to tho Dishop."
"Disl,opl" exclaimed Potts. "BlHhopl What
Bishop p
"Woll, you aco thoro woro flftocn Of blrr. Mo-
0rath and eighty-two clildron, and they Hhovcd
tho whole lot OF on old Potts. Perhaps you
don't knowhim 7"
Tho Bishop gave wild, uncarthly shriok and
wont into a hyHtorical fit, and writhed upon tho
floor ID It ho had hydrophobia. Whom ho re-
covorod he leaped from the train and walked
back to San Fra1lclgco Flo afterward took the
first steamer for Peru, wllero ho entered mon
astery and becamo colibhts.
His carpot.bag was sent on to his family. It
contained tho balance OF the mouth organs. On
ChriBtmas morning they woro distributed, md
In ]csa than an hour the ontire 203 children wero
sick from sucking the paint Off Of them. A doc
tor Tas called, and le boonod 30 much 1ntorost
cd in tho family TINT Brigham divorced tho
whole concorn from old potts and annexed it to
tho doctor, who Immediately lost his reason, and
would lavo butcllered tho cntiro family II tho
rod-hairod woman and the oldest boy had not
marched him off to 1unatiu nuyluin, where he
Bpont his time trying to arrive ut an estimate OF
tho number Of his chi1dron by bis ciphorng with
nm impossible combination OF tho multiplication
table and algebra.-Mur A1etcr.
, 1873-01-02

FUuLTAY-Tllero was 10 tra<!u 10 speak Of this
morning. aud doalera closed eally In honor Of New
YearE Day. Prices quoable lower all round ant!
there Is good supply VI poultry left over. quotes
Tnrkeya q a. 1o@l3o ch!ckena at t.sod33o; geeae at
soo is cIoiee dry pcfod iurksys 1T 1io; dozen
good chickens at $500.
PDTA1DES-Car lois OF choice pcachhl ows arc in
fair demand nj 7p75c. Patatnas sell from atoro nt
80G39oc. Tho receipts very light,
HALT-The demand for salt continues fair and tbs
market IL firm. We again quote: Ononlnga aud Bagl-
nAw 1nc, S240; ordinary coarse, $2i0: coarse Dla-
1nond g $3.50; ground solar {::6o dairy, without
naf slu ssaSy sy
$500.
aEEDE-Thero was nothing doing Today. We coE-
time quotations rs follows: Timothy at $2.o0a3.25
choice At a. .3otR5.25; mammoth do, <5.G085 rs; fax
at Sl.G581.76; Hungarian, Soc.
, 1873-01-02

honnrc me, nnd TO ronow my Pledge Of undyfng cvo-
ton 70 ner to interoa Of lho cy At large,
this great aud Browng-isnd looking shcepishy sus-
lico'ta at tho hntiso.o atck1-" Oh eonfouul you,
Ettz, tAt8 Ia NtU o,rn cu3d!h
, 1873-01-02

From tho annual report OF tho receipts and
shipments Of 1.-Two stock during the year 1879,
Furnished by Goo. T. Williams, Aasatant seoro-
tasy OF the Union Stock Yards and Transit CON-
panY, We compile tho following, tabloa;
, 1873-01-02

The total number Of omgrants who arrived in
1871 waB 229, ,G39, showing a largo increase for
1872.
According to rough estimates, tho following
wore the destinations OF tho emigrants arriving
, 1873-01-02
Now York Emigration Statistics.
Finn. tie tNe,o Fork hreni,iq Poat,

Tho report Of tho Commissioners OF Emigra-
tion for the yaar 1872, to ho submittod to tho
Legislature, shows tho following. to be the ap-
rroximato naulbor Of omgrantB from each coun-
try Of the Old World aftiving ut thia port be-
tween the 1st Of last January and the 2Gth Of
, 1873-01-02

Beneath all this covering WAS y gildel squaro
the tea blossom WAS displayed. Rolled In bals,
twisted into tiny, fame-nhaped rolls an inch
long, twisted worry small, tiod in llttlo bunohcs,
like clgaretteH 1t ono onl, and whipped into
ahreda ut tho other, was the ten llower, packed in
loose petals OF its orp kind, to preserve tB fra
GRANGE. "Thie," said TUCK chong, lis a tca
that only matdarins Of higlest rank ever get
chance to drink in China. It is grown on tho
plantation Of o very rich mandarin in tho
province Of Foo Chow, and cnn only DO cotton
onee Law forbidding it's export, but oven an
American eau now buy and drink It. It costs
4lG.60 in China. My brother brought back
few pounds on his last yiait to China have
cisco for loss than $50 pound"
, 1873-01-02

SHEEP-Ille market wns qnet and steady, at
S9.25@5.25 for common to choice. All sold.
, 1873-01-02

LEMONS AND ORAkGES-We continue to quota
Palermo aud MesBina lemons ut to. SOC 7.00 Frnnch
aud slaagaa at s0.ooa6.6o: Valencia do at sl2.0o@
II. per caae.
METALS AND T1NNEns srooK-T1n plate ia
quito nrn, aud will probably advance ~ trade
given below:
TN phA1E-Ic. 1o114, s14.oo; DO, 12x12, s145o,
do, 1920, *1h 90 do, roofing, &c, $3.50.
Pho TIN--Large, t9c; small. 4lo bar, 42o
SHEET z!Nc-Fnll casks, 11o; 4zlf casks, Ike;
leas quantity, 1lMc; slab, DC.
6HEkT InuS-No. 81, 1Hc rates.
CorrEn--Coprer bottona, 4ao brazicrs, over 10 lbs,
47c tiuncd copper, 43c.
W1RE-2 to O. 3, md ., 100; 10 to II, lie; IL,
io ss sai fa = Sanale ~ Dsi cit IT. d.;
count fcfce wirc. he.
0ILs-The Inquiry for oils WAS small. aud mainly
confined to carbon, lard, and whale. Prices wore
generally nrlner, notably 10 for lnsoo1 and turpen
2ec; extra lard OIL 7su No. !, 6sc No. ?. o6o; in
sesdtraw, 6sc do boiiea o3c while, $50 sperm, s2oo
M210 laats' foot oil, strictly pure $.l0, do extra,
s .oo: do No. !, eo@95o; bank OIL ss97oe: strata,
729:75S r slepnant @ oil, 9sc; tnrpsatine, 5o172c.
considerable movement IN this class Of goods, and
, 1873-01-02
CHICAGO LIVE STOCK MARKET,

WEpaEspAY EVENING. Jan. /.
Tho receipts Of live stock since Saturday have
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
It is n curious fact that as settle.

* 1t is curious fact that as settle
mcnts spread beyond the Mississippi,
rains increase both in frequency and
the amount Of water. Many beds OF
streams which were uniformly dry in
summer only ten years ago, are now
full through the year. Travellers say
the Laramie plains were once destitute
Of vegetation; now tilty have a iaxur-
liant growth, and will raise large crops
of wheat. Denver was built on the
banks of an extinct creek, perfectly dry.
Now it is full of water, and needs to be
crossed by bridges. Salt Lake is seven
feet higher than ten years ago, and is
steadily rising. The vast plains which
engineers pronounced uninhabitabl, and
fit only for droves Of buffalo, because
destitute of streams and springs, may
yet become great States, with q dense
population.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
ANOTHER ANCIENT CITY"

Col. W. 7. Roberts, who recently
went down to Arizona, hunting for
diamonds, ctc., reports the discovery of
the ruins of an ancient city, which coy
ers an area of about three square miles,
1t was enclosed by wall of sandstone
quarricl and dressed, ten o. twelve feet
thick, AMI which, Judging by the de-
bris, was fifteen or twenty feet high be-
fore it's fall. il most places It had
crumb.el away and fallen, and was
covered with sand, but, III many places
it was still standing six OF eight feet
above the sanlhanks which had lriftcd
around it. The entire area inside of
this had at one time been covered with
houses, built of solid sand-stones,
which showed excellent masonry i'll their
construction. This ancient city is stu
atcd in Arizona, about ninety miles from
the boundary line between Utah and
Arizona, and the same distance from
western Colorado line. 1t has the APP
pearancc of being an old Aztec city that
has been deserted for hundreds of years
and fallen to ruins. 1t is entirely of
stone, and not u stick of worked tim
Der is to be found among the ruins.
Nothing but the walls are standing, and
none of them now are left more than
eight or ten feet above the sand, which
is eight or ten feet deep.
The walls still bear the traces of
many hieroglyphics, cut deep into them,
showing various Indian customs and
superstitions. There also ruins of state,
ly monuments, built of square block
sandstone, well quarried and showing
good masonry, which are worked with
notches and crosses cut into them al
regular intervals.
The city is covered with sand, which
it is thought was blown there from the
desert. The sand has become solid and
packed by the rains. Under the sand
is layer of blue clay, six or eight feet
deep. No bones, implements or relics
of any kind were found, with the ex.
ception of some pieces of pottery OF
dark color. These were embellished
with paintings of flowers and ornamen.
tai figures in blue colors. The color
ing matter is of blue mineral sub.
stance of some kind. It is perfectly
-indelible, and pieces of the pottery
that have been exposed to storms,
which have worn away the solid mason
ry of the walls of the city, show THEN
colors as fresh and bright to all appear,
ances rs when new.
The pottery itself has been found to
be perfectly tire-proof upon trial in
crucibles and furnaces.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

mon RANGES. and none on Trinity and
Siskiyou.
The for, which has completely envel-
oped the whole country for the past six
DAYS. has raised since dark, and it is
now clear and bright. Stages are run
ming regularly, and have not missed q
trip this Winter.
CHICAGO, Jan. 23.-A terrible snow
storm occurred here this morning, and
continues with undated violence.
Probably ten inches have fallen, and
is drifting badly. No trains left to-
night.
YREgA, Jan. 23.-Gen. Wheaton is
preparing to build boats for the pur-
pose of guarding the lake shore and
Che L,va bed, and keep the Indians
from coming there for water. Other
wise the troops were lying quietly in
camp.
European News.
LONDON, Jan. Alt is believed that
the strike of iron miners in Wales, will
soon end.
PARIS, Jan. 21.-In the Assembly to-
day, after noisy and undignifed dis
= cusson, Chlistophalc's motion approx
in. the secular means of public i'll
struction on educational reform, was
adopted.
Edward RuIwer Lytto" Dead.
LONDON, Jan. 4S.-Right Hon. Ed
ward Bulwer Lytton, the well known
English author, died this afternoon,
He was aged 81 years.
Lnhor strike.
New YonK, Jan. 1S.-A London dis
patch received here to-day reports q
strike among the iron foundries and
rolling mills throughout Wales.
E:.:zcot.c in San Francisco.
SAN FR\Nc.sco, Jan. 1S.-The cpl
zootic has reached San Francisco
There arc fonr well-malkcd cases re-
ported
The United States steamship H,sSalo
has been obtained for the use of II scien-
tifc party WHO are to make astronomi-
cal observations of the bay
EunEKA. Jan. 19.--Tho epidemic
among horses is increasing; i'll consc-
uuonce of which Rtchard has miven
notice to shippers to mark no goods in
his cure as his teams will shortly be
Withdrawn, probably for the winter.
shipping.
SAN FH,Hclsco, Jan. 22.-Arrived--
ship Ea,ty I'm r'ira, from L;vcrpo oil;
having made the fastest time on record
between these ports. Bark Bnr"a
I,str, from Port Gamble, schooner
.Jtm"s To,cnS'Hd, from Seattle.
Arrived steamer Prince IiTird, from
Victoria; bark Oal It'll, from Port
Blakely.
San FNANUsco, Jan. 22-Arrived-
ship Hizot'M KimbaN, Port Gamble;
bark Coriaya, Valparaiso; bark on
wart!, Utsalady; schooner, Occan Pearl,
Seattle; sailed-ship R'rcre, Port
Discovery.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
For Sale.

TOWN PROPERTY IN OLYMPIA, viz
Lot Block So, near the Swantown bridge.
Lots z and Block %. ON Third Street oppo-
site Sparks new building
Lot Block 81 on Second Street, opposite
the STANDARD Office:
Lot Block 10:
The above known as "tho Mason Proper.
ty."
Lots and Block II, east of Bettman's old
store.
Dwelling house and part of lot on Washing
ton Street. between Second and Third Street;
nearly opposite the STANDARD Office.
Dwelling house and two lots on Jefferson
Street, cast and adjoining Williams Add:
ton.
Lots l. 2 and 8 Block 10, north of and ad:
Joining j. n. Gales residence, 100 feet front
on Main Street. This property is offered for
Lots and Block CT, adjoining T. r. Rob-
ert's place, and running form Tenth to Union
Streets.
Lots and Block S.
Parts Of Lots and Block 1, on Main ST..
with buildings and improvements.
Lot II Block 2, Mill Addition to Tumwater,
Corner lot, cleared, fenced, and orchard on
same. Good water
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

az An Assyrian MS. of great inter
est and value has just been discovered
by one of the librarians of the British
Museum. 1t gives an account of the
Deluge almost identical with that con-
tanned in the Book of Genesis.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

IIoLLowAY's PIlIs-Operating through the
bile and the blood these great searchers OF
the observation-disclosures from every organ the
poison of disease. The facility with which
they cure dyspepsia darrhooa is wonderful.
Sold u Maiden Lane N. Y. Price IS cents
per box. Ask for new style; the old is coun-
fpripitptl.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

81 A struggle is going forward for
the office of State librarian of Indiana,
between negro and white woman.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
RORN:

AtSteiacoom. on the 18th inst, to the wife
of \dolph Packshcr, son.
At Walla Walla. an the 31st ult., to the wife
of Charles Russell, IL daughter.
In Skaget Valley, on the 9Th inst, to the
wife of s. s. Finglcy, a son.
At la Conner, on the 18th inst, to the vito
of James OI.aughlin, Il son.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

~ Hudibras calls matrimony per-
verse fever beginning with heat and
ending with frost.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

g. Miss Braddon, the novelist, has
achieved eminent distinction and is yet
but four years Oh the shady side OF
thirty.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

- Very short wedding trips are in
fashion just now, and very short engage
ileu.3.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
- ALSO
THE GRAHAM CLAIM.

In Mason county, over 800 acres Of land
fronting on the mouths of Oyster and Skoo-
KUN bays, including the Arcadia Town site.
soil first quality, plenty of water for irriga-
ton; back of claim soil second rate, timber
supposed to be good for two million feet.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

@ Lucretia Mott is 70 years old;
~ Victoria G. Woolhn!l. ~; Olive Logan,
is; and Anna Dickinson, SO.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
The Littleiohn Farm,

In Sec. s. Township 16 Range West. TWEEN.
ty-five acres in meadow, about 90 acres OF
good bottom land, house, barn and improve
mentS.
Also in Lewis county. the farm known -
the
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
In Thurston county,
u 1HUHSVO11 COUfIUyi
The Waddell Place.

On Tanalquot Plains, A grazing farm Of
house on the place, good post barn, 500 bear
ing apple trees, good well of water. 50 acres Of
good meadow land, about 20 ceres seeded
down.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

havenow enlarged our
our stock, determined
to sell goods for cash
or country produce at
a very small profit, in
large or small quanti-
ties. Our goods are Sc
lected and bought by
ono of tho most eXpe-
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25
KING DONATION CLAIM.

containing $40 acres, situated on the Chehalit
river, eight miles from ClaQuato and ten miles
from the Newaukum Railroad depot; 1oc
acres under fence; house, two barns and
grainary. Terms Of payment easy. One OF
the most desirable places in the country
ALSO
OTHER FRoPERTx
In various parts Of the Country.
Guarantees title, without extra charge,
when employed as conveyancer.
Olympia, January 20, 1872. 42:tf
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

ricnced and best cduca-
ted business men on
the Pacific Coast ; and
having in every re-
spect better facilities
for obtaining goods
than most any other
house on the Sound, we
can guarantee satisfac-
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1873-01-25

New goods always on
the way, by every ves-
sci from San Francisco.
Strangers or new COM
ers will find it to their
advantage to purchase
stock and outfits of us.
The demand for goods
having increased, we
Rapides gazette. (Alexandria, La.) 1869-187?, 1873-06-14
How to Carry an Umbrella.

PERHAPS you don't know? If so, I'll
tell you.
If YOU are In the country, where there
is plenty of room, the knowledge will be
of no use to you, and you had better not
waste your time in reading this article.
But if you are in the city you will find
it practically to your advantage to study
the rules laid down.
To begin at the beginning:
Be sure and pull your hat well down
over your ewes before you start out with
your umbrella. Button up your coat. If
It is cold weather tie on a muffler. If you
chew tobacco take fresh quid. Slam the
door when you 90 out of your house. II
will give people inside clear understand
ing of the fact that you are proprietor and
have a right to slam your own door rs
much as you please. -,
After you step out on the crowded side
walk, thrust your umbrella under your
arm, and try and have the two points
stick out equally, before and behind, at
right angles with your body. 1t is always
well when you are purchasing, to buy as
long an umbrella as you can get. 1t will
be likely to last longer, as well as to stick
out further when you are carrying it.
Then walk as fast as you can. The
faster the better. People in cities al
ways go fast for fear time will overtake
them. 10
Everybody who has the impudence to
push up behind you will get punished for
It by poke from the umbrella you carry
behind and everybody you meet will get
a poke from the umbrella you carry in
front; for arranged in this way an UNI
brella acts on the principle Of double
ender, and IKE old Gradpa Lyman's gun,
kills equally well at both ends.
ia small boy or two should be knocked
over, no matter! 1t will learn small boys
TO STAY at home and pick up chips for
their mothers. No business out in the
street, getting in the way Of peoples um-
brellas 9
If it rains, spread your umbrella and
hold it well down in front Of you. People
who are coming the other way must keep
their own lookout. OF course you will be
going with your face to the storm. One
always Is. If you put anybody's eyes out,
it won'tbe your fault-they should have
got out of the way when they saw you
coming! -
Ifyour umbrella becomes entangled in a
lady's laces, or frfnges, don't stop to dis
entangle it. Tear along. Serves her right
for wearing such fo0leriesI
Make your way, ne matter who sinks
or swims, and most likely you will die
rich, and all your relatives will be boil
ing over with joy at your death, and will
ma employment for year to come in
ngnting over the lucre you have left be
hind.--hate Thorn, in N. Y. Weekly.