The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1873-04-19
WIT AND WISDOM.

WHEN the heart is won. the iudv-
ment 10 easily persuaded.
The woman. cause is man. the, r.. or sink
'Ss@,~' assFisn o. godliks. bond ~ free"
TNNySyy.
In the West newspaper editors VII
their bad debts at auction for cash W
the highest bidder.
KANSAS lawyers are fined fDr prnfan-
! lty and contempt Of court when thew
undertake 70 quote Latin 10 the
judge
MY DEAR, what kind OF a stone do
you suppose 1 will receive when die y''
sald an affectionate husband IL his vife
Birthstone, my love, vas the atIec
tionate reply.
II SAY, Jack, " shouted drover. the
other day, 70 his pal, these cursed
sheep won't move in this weather
lend ua bark of your dog, will your
ABE dose bells ringing for frel' IN
quired Simon Of Tiberins. 'sNo in
deed, answered Hbe, ''dey got plenty
Of fire, and de bells am ringing for va
ter
A LADY having the misfortune "
have her husband hang himself on all
apple tree, the wife of neighbor i'm
Imediately came IL beg q branch of that
ttree, to have it grated into one in her
lorchard. For who knows, said she
but II may bear the same kind Of
fruit"
THE Warren Mad says that little
boy on Third street ran into the house
the other day, crying at the top nf his
voice because another little boy
wouldn't let him put mud on his head
with . shingle Some children are
Just like their parents no accommo-
.dation about them.
II AN Illinois girl, having S3O 900 "
her own, recently refused W marry \
lciergymAn because she thought herself
not good enough TO be a clergyman
wife He gave up his sacred calling and
proposed again, and then she refused
him because she thought herself ton
|goOd 10 marry a man who would aban
don his nigh profession TO gain wo-
mah's hand
A SMART boy having been required
70 write composition on some part
of the human body, expanded AS fol-
lows ''The Throat-A throat is c.,n-
venieht to have, especially for roosters
and ministers. The former eats corn
and crows with it the latter breaches
through his'n and ties it up"
Az old lady read an item In one ~
the papers, the ether day, Describing
how grindstone burst in a saw factory
and killed four men. She lust hap-
Pened 10 remember that there was 4
small griRdstOne down in her cellar.
leaning up against the wall. 50 she
went out and got an Accident Insu-
rance policy, and then, snmmoninr the
hired girl, and holding the pie board In
front Of her, 90 that if the thing explo-
ded her face would not be injured. she
had the stone taken in the alley. whore
twenty-four buckets Of water we're
thrown ON it, and stick was stuck N
the hole, bearing a placard marked
Dangerous. Size says it's mercy
tine whole house was not blown 10
pieces by the thing before this.
Two brothers IN Iowa married two sis-
IN, and aftsrward their father married A
ster OF their wives. Most Of their spare
me Ia now devoted to efforts t. ascertain
g relationship of their children.
"A VERMONT woman, who recently fol-
wed the remains of her rather irregular
isoand To the grave, afterward remarked
&C she had one consolation 'She knew
w where he slept o'nights.
AT Late meeting OF baker strikers in
gln, Scotland, an enthusiast concluded
address with the following
May the cock Of Scotland never crow
Nay he rose " England never bloa
May the harp u Ireland never play
WI We poor bakers yet better pay f"