The Republican journal., 1873-03-20
Home Whitewashing.

The Credit Mobiler business, that de-
veloped 80 many new things, brought in
to fashion, if not into being, what may be
called home embarrassing. By this in-
vcntion the Congressman who so we'll
illustrate the proverb that che who maketll
haste 20 be rich shall not be innocent
and 90 home to their constituents as black
as crows. are painted over until they rival
the quiet shades of South Bend, than &
whtewashing demonstration began, his
constituents exhibiting as much interest
in their soiled pet as did the mysterious
Nesbitt of the thousand dollar gifts. They
waited upon Schuyler, they gathered
around and gushngly embraced him, and
they all brought embarrassing brushes
1t was laid on thick and good, and Schuy-
Ter smiled again. Speeches flew back and
forth like shutties busy weaving a robe OF
charity broad enough to cover the Mobilie1
transactions.
Mass, where Cakes Ames resides and
overooks the making of his shovels His
friends GOT together to express their con-
fidence in the immense honesty of Cakes,
and then drink confusion to his traducers.
OF course this was done in good old wine
and with lashings of choice feed There
is nothing like good dinner, washed
down with good wine, to make man feel
at peace with himself and the rest of man
kind. 1t was under these benign influ
ences that the constituents spoke through
Dir. Cogsw we'll. And this is what the Doc
tor was inspired to be delivered Of
Hon. CAKES AMEs.-Your friends and neigh
bors, feeling that some mark of respect and es-
teem Is due to you from them, have COTTON III
tins complimentary reception in honor to your
sell, thereby atfordlng themselves the gratca-
lion OF meeting You socially, of extending to
you the hand of welcome, and of making YOU
feel that "be it ever so humble there is no place
like home" Applause. We meet you as
friends and nelghborS. irrespective of party
that we may show to you that during your long
| term Of service in the United States Congress
from this district we have had the most perfect
confidence in your honor and integrity; that We
have always been proud to claim YOU as a friept
and ielloWtownsman. | feel confident that
am bat speaking the sentiment of every true
friend OF Mr.. Ames here tonight when | say.
that whilst others have sought to cast stigma
upon vou fair name and reputation, we have
always looked upon YOU as that ''noblest work
OF GCd-an honest man." Loud applause.
But see before me here tonight many of youl
friends who are far better able than myself to
sound your praise and worth. So | will close
T.
Ames-like gold from the crucbe, he has
passed through the fiery ordeal and come out
| brighter and purer." Applause.
'Inspiring. bold John Barley -corn''-
what will he not prompt 4 man to say
II MIR. Ames had furnished the Doctor and
all who followed him with each one of his
most capacious scoop shovels. he couldn't
have piled the embarrassing on thicker
The noblest work of God seems to be 8
railroad director who places stock among
| Congressman ut ono-tenth ITS value "whert
ii will do the most good" 1t will seen
to most people that God has made some
/ things nobler than that.
OF course Cakes saw the point OF thi
/ reception, and responded in happy man
/ ner. What man wouldn't under the cir
cnmstances. He had left Washington il
| bad odor and had discovered at his very
hcarthstone the place that Jack Falstatf 81
Ionged Tor, ''where a commodity of gooc
names could be had
We now await returns from the home
OF Brooks, Patterson, Kelley, and the res
of the nobest works OF God. They will
certainly be out of fashion if they dom
meet, take drinks and 60 into ectacie
oyer each particular noblest work lie
them be heard from by all means