Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1873-10-25
Dissecting a Doctors Bill.

Dissecting a Doctors Bill.
Abou. three months ago, Jacob Milch- |
mans wife in Detroit was somewhat III,
and In ught doctor ought to Dc sent
to her; 30 he called at Detroit street
office and requested the physician to go
ont to his hoase. The call was made. q
prescription left with Mrs NJ, and either
the medicine was very effectual or Mrs.
NJ. was not very sick, for when he called
the next day, she informed HIM that
she was all cured, and he need not come
any more. Last Monday, Jacob received
by mail bill from DR.. H., "Due Tor
medical services, Sl3. 70. =,
Jacob studied long time over that
bill, and showed it to his wife, and
studied over it with her but the more
lie locked at it, and thought about 1t.
tho more it seemed to him that there
must be- q mistake. The next morning,
he called at the doctors Office, bill mi
hand, and found the proprietor sitting
there, waiting to hear OF some one suner
ing from green corn, or one OF the otnerI
prevalent diseases.
Mr.. Milchman laid his hut down care
fully, handed the bill to DR.. H., saying
"You was DR.. T., 1 suppose q
"Yes. yes. certainly. Mr.: Milcnman y
sit down. How is your wife? >,
go my wife is all right she Ii all
right. You doctered her, eh?'
"I gave her some medicine that
seemed to work like magic.
"Yes, 80 it did, so it did. That was
your bill, eh?'
Eyes, but no hurry about it, Mr..
M,lchman take a little time on 1t, II
you want to no hurry"
"That was right, was it-Sl3. 15Y
LET me see yes, that is the amount,
Mr.. Milchman but no hurry about
paying it, you know"
Thirteen dollars and seventy-hve
cents for one visit That was pretty
tam dear, don't you think 500"
Here the doctor smiles all over In the
most forgiving way, saving: My dear
Mr.. Milchman, you are far out OF the
way. For one visit f? My dear sir, that
is the way with the unprofessional
mind. l assure you when you see the
items you will agree with me that the
amount is low, sir. very low"
90" said Jacob, there was items.
was there we'll, where those items are?"
"In my memorandum book, sir. You
shall have them, certainly, if you wish.
You want the items, do yOu 2"
"That YVES yust 2hat / want, said
Jacob, and apparently much to the doc
tors annoyance. He hesitated mo
ment and then drew q small memoran-
dum-book from his breast-pOcket, open
ed it, looked at Jacob, and began -
"May 16.-Use of horse and buggy
to call on Mrs. Milchmsn, one dollar
and half"
"Stop a little" said Jacob, "till ]
write him down. and he proceeded to
write the item down. "Don't you got
no horse p he asked, when he had fin
ished his writing.
"Ye-es," aid the doctor. unwillingly
"but of course I have to charge for use
the same as if he WAS Q hired horse
don't you see?"
30 yes, he was your horse, but yor
charge yonself for him?"
"Yes, that is it. Now for item No. 2
To looking at the tongue Of Mrs. NJ.
fifty cents"
20 you look at my wife's tongue
eh?"
Certainly, I had to. you know
Item No. 8. To feeling pulse of Mrs
NJ, sixty cents"
"Dat was cheap enough y
81 knew you would think SO" ex
claimed the doctor, now satisfied tina
he was all right. Item No. 4. To hear
ing Ms. Ms report Of her case, on
dollar"
"Mine Gott You charge me for m
wife's talking?"
"Only what she said in a professions
wav, l assure you. That item you vii
tiud.ccr1eet take the next. To writin
prescription for Mrs. NJ SO. That wa
where the heavy work came in, 20
know"
pretty tam heavy think SO y
"Very reasonable for the amount G
care 1 gave the subject, as you will Sc
when You think it over. Item again
To calling the next day, with cop
fnr"scription-book with me, $3."
well, dat was all you got, amt it
You was told my wife was all right, an
that was only s960. Where you mak
your S13.75?"
lyon are mistaken about that bein
all, Mr.. Milchman. No, sir, l cOul
not let the matter drop there. Prs
allow me TO proceed. To studying Ov'
, the case in my u.i -. g."
go you studied him over there?"
Certainly 1 did. Next: To ridir
, around by your house, on my way hom
and looking attentively about the prer
ises, 81 to meeting child and askil
{ how her mother was, 81 to makil
bill, postage, etc. fifteen cents. Ther
, sir, are all the items, and very reaso
. able, too, upon my honor"
I'm connection with the meeting
the association for the advancement
: science, at Lyons, the story is told Of
well-knOwn Geneva professor that,
: the occasion of one of the expeditio
u of the association into the country, tn
. we're thrown upon the resources of
70 second-rate cafe for refreshment. T
, professor demanded of the garcon
3 they had any chicory. eyes" and
10 supply was brought. Have you a
more?" Certainly ;" and some mt
made its appearance. "Is this all
Is "Yes, monsieur, that is all our suppl.
9, "Now, will you make US some coffee
,r A policeman, standing in doorv
1t on jefferson avenue Monday mig
j. heard yell and scream above, and
j. husband and wife came rolling do
n- together, he having club and she 1
re iron grasped tightly. As soon as Il
N reached the bottom of the stairs and 6
the blue coat, they sprang up and [
wife exclaimed, % Bill, don't We hs