Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1873-04-10
CCoMMUNIcATED.l
SOMEWHERE, OR SOMEWHERE ELSE
NIL or 1ono

sionally, especially when it contains an in
teresting letter from yourself, in which
runs "vein of pleasantly" throughout.
It appears 'your people were sorely exer-
cised as to my identity" You are right,
am the same, your friend, "Honest Lord
Iago Angus" at your service; and to solve
another wonder" in your letter will in
form you that am "from Greenland's icy
mountains" and am not Bully JOHN
This information I communicate to you in
confidence, but Capt. Wells, only, may see
it. The laws and customs of your people
being so different from those of mine, I
wish to make few inquiries of you as we
go along: For instance, it is the custom in
our country, when "a man falls among
thieves and gets badly BEATEN" to go to
him "and bind up his wounds, pouring in
oil and wine," and we never expect to be
set upon and beaten ourselves for this
charitable work. Now, what is the law
in your country9 1t is very natural in
ference that things from "Greenland" will
very likely be somewhat greenish them
selves, and so find it in my case. For
when I supposed your County Commits
sieners were set of honest, faithful and
economical men, doing their duty without
@'partiality, fear or favor" under the neso
light upon the subject, they are proven to
be a set of old fogies, too slow for the times
and too mean to allow hungry man de-
cent "grab" in their treasury, and, withal,
they are perfectly satisfied with levying a
tax of about thirty thousand dollars, upon
the "dear people" to pay the yearly coun-
ty expenses! Now, when you remember
that Capt. Wells says our territory is over
four hundred square miles, the paltriness
of this sum will appear at once. What
Six thousand people pay only thirty thou
sand dollars! Why, where is there any
chance to "grab2" A pickpocket would
laugh at your contemplate pile. thought,
at least, to be hundred thousand, then it
would be getting in the neighborhood of
respectability
But "the world moves" ct nos nautGn1,l7'
in ills. Discoveries, inventions, improve
ments, &C., are the order of the day and
belong to the spirit of the times, and while
some of them would utterly astound our
supplemented people, your folks take
them as matters of course and things to be
expected in the progress of the age. Now,
speaking of discoveries, &C., reminds me
that I have heard that your Congress has
made one of the most startling discoveries
the world has ever known. 1t is said Con-
1ass ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS they
call his name "Credit Mobilier"- ''the god
of this woodland tits said his votaries,
ing all over the land. In the South, espe-
cially, his affairs and temples are the fash
ionable things. And understand move
ment is on "foot," in your county, to erect
temple to this new god in Port Tobacco,
and that this is the reason of the 6rogon
movement there against your slow team,
old fogy County Commissioners. And, it's
said, when this gle-horious event shall have
taken place, that then the great American
Eagle" can lie and scream, and swear and
tear, and reel and steal, and roar and soar
to his hearts content, with no one to let or
hinder
Confound the old antiquated Court
House! What if it does leak! Pull the
old thing down, and let us have in it's
place, say they, grand temple, dedicated
to this new god, with its spire rising, ris-
ing, rising high up to the clouds and
priests, and levites to serve at it's affairs
and eat the sacrifices slain for it's service
Then will come Gen. Grants electro-steam
millennium. Then will the Gland flow
with milk and honey" and greenbacks, and
the terrible taxes "shall be no more''-
small. Then we shall have "free schools"
Hfee press" Tor pressure on the purse,)
and ''free treasury!' Then will be real
lied the motto: "High taxes, high wages"
Now, to our people, these things appear
little complex and mixed, but, as you are
"native and to the manor born" it is like.
ly they are as clear as foggy night to you.
Hyou should feel disposed to answer my
letter, you must bear in mind that we are
an artless, simple-minded, and indeed, al
most foolish" people, and write accord
ingly. For we cannot understand how it
is that man can knock his friend down
in fit of pleasantly" Nor can we "see
it, how he can decline the insidious in
vitation" and forthwith proceed to ''contin-
he the subject" But perhaps this is his
stylVe. 1t may be that you can explain all
this, as you are acquainted with the habits
of your people. Now when knockdown
is given as proof of intense admiration for
purity of motive, christian character, &C.,
&C., what kind of evidence, demonstration,
'outward sign" or what not, are we to
look for when his big heart is swelled with
emotions of love for his dearest friends and
nearest relations? Do earthquakes hap
pen, or stars fall, or the moon get green
We "don't know" You, perhaps, can give
light upon the subject.
Yours ever,
"HoNEsT LORD IAGo ANGUS"