The Portland daily press., 1873-11-17
Mark Twain's Lecture ON the Sandwich
Islands,

The aspect of the lecture-hall of the Liver
pool Institute last night the congested state
OF all the avenues leading to the building,
and the difficulty of preserving qult tude in
the interior, owing to the density of the
crowd with which it was packed, showed how
intense was the curiosity to see and hear
Mark Twain, the quaint American humor-
lst. Those who gained admission found their
curiosity well repaid by the enjoyment of one
OF the most characteristic compositions ever
deliv red with the air of an improvisation by
whimsical wit. Mr.. Twain has neither
desk nor manuscript. His appearance is not
imposing. Elocution, it may be said, he has
none. All ne says is pronounced with a
strong American accent, in a low, rather
droning monotone. He never, even in bur-
leque, raises his voice or gives himself any
trouble to do NOR" than talk, and does moth
ing for fleet except to pause and deliver the
real point of his jokes or stories when the
audience have done laughing at them. With
no assistance from ait-unless this absence
of art be itself artistic-Mark Twain not
merely keeps his audience in uproarious
laughter during the greater part of his lee
ture, but without the slightest change of de-
meanor extorts from them unboul dec admir-
alton by the delivery Of passages of exceeding
b auty and vividness.
To retail the jokes of such a lecture would
probably be to state the entertainment which
we hope many hundreds of Liverpool people
will! hereafter enjoy, without conveying to
our readers any true impressiO OF il. Start
ing with an expression of contempL towards
the natives who persisted in calling the is
land, Hawaiian after Captain Cook-who dis
covered them, and Must know best-declared
them to be the Sandwich Islands, Mr.
Twain notes how civilization, education, and
other calamities have thinned the popula-
ton, and suggests that it is probable the
white people will start few more semina-
ries of learning and finish them. He then
plunges into half serious half-jocose, sketch
of the native manners, morals, and customs.
Amongst other things he surprised the au
dience by telling how the islanders eat their
pet puppies when they have grown up TO be
dogs. "This saddeDs me- said the lecturer.
II would rather go hungry two days than eat
an old friend. Alter all, however, it is only
| the sausage Of civilization with the mystery
| removed He described certain cannibal
as man of strong political principles and
not unuseful to his party, and gave a comic
description of his death with crime on his con
science and a tough old whale captain
any of bis audience to believe
/ this by himself but it might be ''di-
! vided up" amongst ], 400 or 1900 people and
| anybody could believe 1,500th part of any
story whatever. In illustration of the back
handed way in which every thing is done in
| the Sandwich Islands, he stated that they
used tie same word for "How dye do?' and
GOOD bye,' so that you never could tell
whether you had just arrived or were gong.
But a more striking example of perversity
| was the native duck, which, though webfoot-
ed, lived on the top of mountains 1000 ieet
high, and never saw water unless it rained,
when it Mas the first person to bunt for shell
| ter.
How much of Mr.. Twain's description is
\ a. h. to1,1 L. ..:..ks Al
Sandwich Islands would enable us to say, Tor
his manner is inscrutable and his union OF
truth and fiction arbitrary. His account of
the veracity of others is certainly not en-
couraging. The tales which he fathers on
one Morgan who ran away from hail
storm, and was not caught by it, though his
dog had to swim behind the wagon-would
have astonished the Menteur of Corneille or
the Liar of Foote. A keen feeling of
political satire Iuns through the lectur-
| er's account of the Government of the
Sandwich Islands, and we fancy some
other region is meant TO lie limited at VIXEN
we hear of every two men out there being
office-hoders and the third an office-seeker,
and when of loquocious speaker i. is said
that he would go on chirping away till the
sound of the last trump, and would only stop
then from the force OF circumstances. Al
most every sly or yenturesome o &c Of quaint-
ness in which the ecturer INDUCED was in
creased in effect by the singular uncons -nus
manner in which he made his point and his
after point each surprise; but ,er-
! haps the greater surprise after all, was The
sudden introduction at different points Of the
lecture without any notice or change of al :
mel OF two of the most eloquent pieces OF de-
scriptive comp sitioh that ever fell from the
lips of man. One had for its subject great
volcano. The other gave lovely and Ian
gushing picture of the Sandwich lands,
where a; night ''the great mellow stars burn
like torches" and where everything is luxu-
ry and softness, and ease and peace. Wbeth-
er thus eloquent, or as usual, keenly and
whimscally droll, Mr.. Mark TWai was
equally acceptable TO his audience. He will
be able to make fortune, on his return from
America, out of the Sandwich islander, and
will find other topics equally capable of his
highly original treatment when that is ex-
hausted.-Llrerpool Paper.