Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1873-12-04
arrival and departure of Trains,
Minor Items.


River road is being fitted with the West
ing house patent brake.
-'Panic prices" is the characteristic
sign in our shop windows.
Only five female Freshmen in Yer
mont University.
About the only use of the wife of
the period is abolished by the invention
Of piano playing machine,
To make winter short give ninety
day note, without grace, right away.
March will then come round before you
know it. .-
A lady reporter, sent to an agricul-
tural fair, wrote of a lot of young pigs
"They look too sweet to live minute
Mr.. Darlington will not allow Ike
to play the guitar. She says he had it
once when he was a child, and it nearly
killed him.
Doctor, what will cure the fever
of love ?" THE chill of wedlock,
mademoiselle.'
A gentleman late one evening met
his servant. "Hallo! where are you
going at this time of night for no
good, I'll warrant :" 81 was going for
you, sir"
Francis Fem Il Co have just re
ceiyed from New York and Boston
"stacks" of goods for the holidays.
They want to sell them The first
thing they did was to be sure to get
prices right, and then they secured
liberal advertising space in the HERALD.
See their column. advertisement this
morning.
Geo. w. billiard, in a new adver-
tisement this morning, gives notice to
the public that he is selling furs at low
prices. Read his advertisement.
A well-dressed dog wears a collar
and pants in the summer.
A Vermont man is Sparkling" Anna
Dickinson, but as he is deaf the press
will not commisserate him.
An ardent youth of II, living on
Green street, sold his skates, bought a
shotgun and was in the woods looking
for Spaniards when last heard from.
1t is reported that the sardine fish
cries of France are about exhausted.
The news is bad, but there are a good
many old sardines left, some Of them
about newspaper offices. -.
DO what you can in every way to.
relieve pecuniary distress, to check. the
current of financial embarrassments and
restore public confidence.
How much are these fearful bulbs
by the quart ?" asked a maiden of a
grocer. He stared at her moment, re-
covered himself, and said, ooh, them
inyuns-eight cents.
-''You needn't come on Saturday
night, or any other night, was the
soothing remark written in delicate fe-
male characters on a postal card which
winged its way through the post Office,
the other day.
Ills the bearded lady your mother p
asked gentleman of little girl at a
circus. "No, sir" she replied, cit is
my father"
Don't hoard your money; but loan
il, or use it to relieve the needy, on the
sapqc principle as you would give bread
to the needy in day of famine.
1t is about time for patent medicine
pedIers to commence their annual pill
grimaees through the country. We are
under the impression that it is not law
ful to kill these men, but afflicted par
ties will find great relief in keeping a
cross dog, or a bear, or rattlesna<e, or
something of that nature close to the
front gate.
An agriculturist friend is proud OF
having raised any vegetation at all on
his farm this year, considering that 1t
was covered with snow up to the goth
of June and again covered with snow
up to his ankles on the 30th of October.
-"Conductor, why didn't you wake
me as l asked you? Here l am miles
beyond my station" Conductor-"l did
try, sir, but all could get out of you
was all right Maria; get the children
their breakfast, and I'll be down IN a
minute"
Last week Deputy sheriffs D. ;.
Gilbert and N. S. May, of Saratoga,
armed with requisition on the Govern
or of Vermont, proceeded to and arrest
ed Washington l. Gilbert at Burlington,
on charge of false pretenses. They
took him to Saratoga, and he gave bail
10 the February sessions. We under
stand that the amount involved in this
case reaches upwards of two thousand
dollars in favor of r. E Morey of Sara
toga.
"A lady who was stoning raisins left
the room, leaving her small boy, forbid
ding him touching the fruit in her abb
sence. swell Charlie, did you take
any raisins ?" ''No,mamma. 9 Iou
know if you did God saw YOU eyes,
| know He did; but He won't tell. J"
Here is the way man in an adjoin-
ing town ''posts" his wife. Persona
having anything in that line TO do will
please ''make note on.
Nor1cR. Where's the Old Woman
known az my Wife, in Consequence OF
Attending the Powows of the Jumpers
and the Howlers and Cat Burners has
become entirely Senceless and Crazy
and Reckless and does nothing but run
70 and down the road and Circulate the
a 4 In famous Lies Conserving Myself
MOS Ners thus accomplishing my Ruin
sho. o. this is to Warn all persons
o oa.sfI. re- eng her on my account for
i shan not ot pay Debit Of her %d
inc Sf e err this i date ser claim any OF her
earnings.
November 10Th, 1878.