The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1873-11-01
A trade in half q mans fortune.

"You don't do that again" said the
pig to the boy who cut his tail off.
A return to the old plan of appreu-
ticing boys to trades is being advo-
Gated.
t. Mast is registered on tho alphabc-
tical list of arrivals at Boston rs "Nast
r."
A correspondent Of a paper having
described the Ohio as "a sickly stream
the editor appended the remark: "That's
eo--it is confined to its bed"
"A Western paper has an article on the
care Of idiots" A contemporary says
that paper is always dragging family
affairs before the public.
A citizen of RousUvlle, p, boasts
that his village can beat Boston out of
: sight on crooked streets, and then have
Z crooks enough left over to start another
town.
{ The abolition of the national banking
'fesaystem, and the substitution of free
. banking, with nothing but legal. tender
circulation, is now attracting some atten-
tion.
4 An Iowa paler procaims itself an
"honest newspaper" and in another
paragraph says: "When man pro-
fesses honesty nowadays, keep your
eye peeled for thief"
'Ea A Partisan, whose wife lately died,
imagined himself transformed into a
weeping willow, and went about the
streets of Paris with flower pot on his
head to announce his transformation.
The Louisville Courier Journal says
- tha. "a Tennessee editor, who has been
drinking Cincinnati whisky for month,
has written to an Eastern publishing
house for patent inside"
A Texas barber who ornamented his
front door with white knob is said to
have had no peace until the last vestige
of it had been shot away by his Sprightly
neighbors, who made use of it as target
So witty compliment is rarely made
i, o. that of Sydney Smiths to his friends,
Mrs. Tighe and Mrs. Cuffo: "Ah,
there you are the cuff that every one
would be glad to wear, and the tie that
:, no one would loose"
sga An insurance decision in Richmond
is to the effect that Northern company
siE liablo for the amount of premiums
paid before the war on policies which
'lapsed during the war, ifthe companies
refused application for renewal after
The war closed.
Tho people of Providence are highly
ineensed at the discovery of an old
English Gazetteer, published in 1875,
which describes Bristol az o tuwI in
Nau-Ruslaud shaving a ,ommodious
harbor, at the entrance of which lies
Rhode Island"
'Greensburg wants directory. 1t is
o nightly occurrence that many of her
citizens cannot find the way to their
homes. 1t will require peculiar direc-
tory to elucidato the intricacies of the
streets of the town on such occasions,
however.
The hest Of young men in every large
city who apply for employment and fail
to get it for the reason that they are
not educated or specially fitted for any
particular business constitutes potent
argument in favor of reform. Under
the apprentice system We should have
fewer Ignorant mechanics and incompe-
tent business men.
A young grass widow, aged 25 years,
and ex-spouse of four living husbands,
il about to harvest her fifth hay crop in
Salt Lake City. Her first husband vas
o Yankee, her second an Italian, her
third Swiss, her fourth German, and
her prospective fifth is Polander. The
The widows tastes are truly cosmopoli-
tain, and she seems ready to take the
world to her glowing and cspricious
bosom.
The Missouri Republican says of the
panic 1--WE may as woll prepare for q
second shock at no very distant day,
whether it comes or not preparation
for it will destroy half its force. The
~-ono,ot;o- ,oolol :, ,.o,oraj ~,u,.or,