The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1873-12-04
A FUNNY MIXTURE.
What Came Of Putting 81 Mrs." Before a
Mans Name.

What Came OF Putting - Mrs. Before a
Mans Name.
I have purchased a billiard table.
My wife says that it is a good thing to
have in the house, and prevents our
boys from spending their evenings away
from home, and lounging in saloons or
bar-rooms.
The table being a new thing, is i'm
mensely popular in the family, and as
our connection is large and friends M
merous, it is seldom that I get a chance
at the balls. By the by, wonder why
everything about balls has such fasci-
nation for human kind, and why every
body is alter them, of some sort or an
other. There are race balls and
Inauguration balls, pawnbrokers' balls
and billiard balls, cannon balls and
nursery bawls, and once knew a widow
Balls, who had more offers of marriage
than any spinster or widow of her age
in the country.
My brc ther-in-law, who lives over the
way from our street, frequently comes
over to play a game of billiards. He
never played before we got our table,
and did not care much for it at first, but
now, since he can carOm on the red and
white, and make a lun of two, he is
incessant in his playing, and we ha' 9
hard work to stop him at bed time. He,
like all other fancy PLAY ers, .sists upon
knocking the balls right and left for an
hour after the game is finished and the
lights are ready to be put out. Indeed,
so pertinacious is he that we have jOcU-
larly named him Mrs. Gibbs, after the
historical lady who owned SOW that
required beating to get it co the trough,
and beating to get it away.
A few evenings since, my family hav-
ing gone to the theatre, and I detained
at home by a cold, 1 sent the following
note by a new servant to my brother
in-iaw:
"Aly Dear Mrs. Gibbs:-Susan has
gone to the theatre, the coast is clear,
and we can have good time. Come
over at once. Ever yours,
:'M. Y. FULLNAldE.
Instead of delivering my note on the
east side of the street, he handed it on
the west side, where, as it was a plain
sheet of paper, not sealed, it was care
fully read and returned to the bearer,
with advice to take it next door, where
the same process was gone through,
until it had been perused by every do
mestic circle in the block.
Finally, a neighbor told the servant
that Mrs. Gibbs resided in Blank street,
No. 129, two doors from the corner of
another street, which place he soon
found, and ioyfully presented the note
to Mrs. Gibbs, who was enjoyinga quiet
evening with Mr.. Gibbs, surrounded by
all the little Gibbses, and several in
quiring friends, who wanted to know
the contents of the note that Mrs. Gibbs
was blushing over and telling the man
she did not understand.
Imagine Mr.. Gibbs surprise when he
had read it, and the sorrowful look that
Overspread his countenance while gaz-
ing upon the partner of his bosom and
the mother of his eleven children.
1AEes OlDDS COu1NA AOb Ca tJAtt1Ly tt14A GllO
new servant complicated the case by
saying that the lady he was after was a
gentleman, which determined Mr.. Gibbs
to put on his hat and come over. Mrs.
Fullname had returned from the theatre
when he arrived, note in hand, and over
a social glass all was satisfactorily ex-
planned and settled. But, alas the
numerous curious eyes in the other
street that had glared upon my note,
next day spread the report that poor
Susan Fuilname was neglected by her
husband, and that poor Mr.. Gibbs was
suing for divorce.
Time, that kills all things, is killing
and curing the rumor; but, although
nine days are over, do not dare to pass
the Gibbs mansion or to look at Mrs.
Gibbs when Mrs. Fullname and myself
are together in public.