Rapides gazette. (Alexandria, La.) 1869-187?, 1873-03-08
GENERAL ITEMS.

FIVE i've 1SheS were TeCehoiy sShe W
mail from Naples to the Crystai falace
aquarium.
FEMALE prisoners in Tennessee are en-
ployed in breaking rock Tor street pave
ments.
CANADA experiences a growing desire
to become annexed neighbOr to the United
States.
BYRON improved-''Hell hath no fury
like woman" whose false hair don't
match.
THE Providence Star asks, "if a state
prison convict takes the smallpox, can
he break out with it?''
CARDS and birthstone make the best
matches, as the clergyman said when he
married gamester to shrew.
The Young ladies of Vassar College
have formed an ''anti-falling-in-love-b
fore'you-are out. ofschool club"
A NEW railway company in Maine has
inconsistently cut down two walkers OF
timber to make sleepers for its road.
EFF wise men never made mistakes, this
would be a hard world for fools-of
whom a great many are which.-Josh
Billings.
A BRITISH zoologist has tabulated fifty.
four varieties of fleas, all of which are,
however, traceable to the same phleboto-
my.
OUR henpecked, when twitted with his
want Of shrewdness before marriage,
sadly observes that he's been shrewed
enough ever since.
A TEUToNIC teetotaler is shocked to
hear that the faculty of a certain wo-
mans college have choice spirits in their
The public school authorities of Gales
burg, H., have refused to admit colored
girls to the schools and the question will
De brought before the courts.
''RHEUMATIsM Discussedn is the theme
OF an editor. A neighbor suggests that he
drop the first syllable from the last word
and 90 on with his harangue.
"SORCERER is another name for muir
derer in Bombay. With a. knowledge of
this fact came the discovery that the Par
sees had revived the society of Thugs.
The North German Lloyd Company,
which already has a fleet of sixty-five
steamships, intends to establish a new
line direct from Havre to the West In
dies.
LOUISVILLE astronomers are going
into ecstasies over French snails, which
the more conservative portion of the pop
ulation characterizes as the antic-lmax
of epicureanism.
DIR. GREEN, the Boston City Physician,
has had already thirty-six cases of per-
sons who had the smallpox the second
time, end five or six cases that had taken
1t for the third time.
SYDNEY SMITH once commenced char
ity sermon by saying: Benevolence is a
sentiment common to human nature. A
never sees b In distress without asking G
to relieve him."
PLAIN things may be as cheap and
humble as one chooses, or ones purse
compels, but anything like luxury must
always be good. Cheap necessaries are
respectable. Cheap finery is low.
A DISCONTINUED wife in Buffalo alleges
that her husband is non corspos ntentis, and
offers in proof the circumstance that he
has been accepted as juryman in two
murder trials.
THERE was one divorce granted to ev-
cry fourteen and half marriages in
Rhode Island in 1871. A fractional mar
riage in little Rhody'' must be small
affair, but perhaps it Is better than none.
THE young ladies of New Haven never
say, '.As thick as leaves i'm Vallambro-
sa;" they think it sounds affected, and
accordingly substitute, Z" As thick as pho
tographs of Yale students"
ONE of the prettiest compliments we
have heard of lately, was that paid by
gentlemen the other evening who object
ed to playing cards with lady, because.
he said, she had such winning ways about
her.
A DRUGGIST is much troubled with little |
boys running in and asking the time of |
day. In answer to one he replied "Why, |
l told you the time but a moment ago." |
fes, sir" said the boy; shut that was for |
another woman"
CALIFORNIA eclipses the centenarian re-
cords OF humanity with live frog lately /
set free from the center of a stratum Of
sandstone which, according to Sir William
Thompson's chronology, must be several |
million years old.
The New Boston, which Is to rise on
the ruins of the old, is to be built on five
avenues, radiating nearly like the sticks
of q fan when half opened, the avenues
so as to enter into the square
around the post-office.
ABOUT two-thirds of the suits decided
by the female justices of Wyoming are
and the verdicts set aside. Wo-
men may be marching on" as Miss Ed
CARTON says in her lecture, but thew are
not in sight politically yet.
The difference between defaulting rev.
enue collectors in Tunis and in this coun-
try, according to the Louisville Courier
Journal, is, that in Tunis they are impaled ]
On stakes, while here they usually walk
off with the stakes.
A LADY with very unmusical voice in i
sisted upon singing at recent party. {
. What does she call that ?" INQUIRED !
guest. "The Tempest, l think" an :
'wered another. "Don't be alarmed
aid a sea-captain present. "It's only I
quail, and will soon be over.'
A RURAL editor, lamenting the death of I
one of the best advertisers and subscri-
,ers we ever had " thus touchingly con- E
dudes his obituary eulogy: ''He pos 3
essed the love, confidence, and esteem of =
III who knew him, and some who did not, .
mi, save slight poker debt to Mr.,
I'D not owe cent in the world"
A KENTUCKY farmer refused to look at 8
sample sewing machine, recently, as he G
ways "sewed wheat by hand" He is Q
eiated 70 the man who did not want a Il
Observation-Disclosures 4. a.. q -