Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1873-05-29
No. II
GENERAL ITEMS.

and if it produces headache it is impure.
Josh Billings says that if a man has got
| $8O,OO0 at interest, and owns the house he
| lives in, it amt much trouble to be philoso-
pher.
The man who would shine in converse
ton must possess original ideas and strong
sympathies- able both to communicate and
to listen.
In Pennsylvania the average wealth to
the population is $1OS1 to each inhabitant.
1t is said that good many have not got their
share, but are anxious to have it paid over.
Mr.. Anson G. Phelps Dodge has declared
in the Dominion Parliament that all his
friends in New York favor a monarchical
form of Government for the United States.
The enterprising vagabond who is organ
izing brass band of twenty women, says that
if they learn half as many airs as they put on,
the experiment cannot fail to be success
"A lady tells us that when she was poor
girl, living in the country, she used to ''plant
corn in her bare feet" This imparts new
idea of the origin of these troublesome things.
"A lady philosopher has arrived at the
conclusion that, although woman is Justly
blamed with having tempted man to eat for
hidden things, lie, took to drinking of his ewn
accord.
The number of persons out Of employ
ment in Philadelphia is appalling. One in
sertion of a little advertisement for clerk in
a railroad office brought 985 applicants in
single day.
The whole thing has gone to the bottom
less pit, said gentleman of an unfortunate
speculation. ''Never mind" said his friend,
lit won't be long before you'll haye chance
to 60 after il"
"A blind woman in Iowa has learned to
thread a cambria needle with her teeth and
tongue. ''Is there anything in the world
that woman's tongue cannot do or undo?"
asks an exchange
-''Lucy" writes from Brooklyn to say that
she don't object to good looking gentleman
gazing square in her face, but that it does
make her awful mad when she looks back to
see him staring back, too.
The Executive Mansion of Missouri is
said to be so filled with electricity that every
one who enters it is terribly shocked. The
phenomenon is sttributed to the over charging
of the architect who built it.
A Wisconsin Justice divorced couple
recently as follows: He stood them in the
middle of the floor, backs together, and as
they walked away from each other, he re-
peated the marriage ceremony backwards.
-''Why don't you get down and lead the
horse? that is the way to keep warm, said a
gentleman to- boy, one cold day. ''No,"
replied the American youth, ''t's a b-b-bor-
rowed horse, and I'll ride him if frceze!'
-"Your children may never have wealth."
observed neighboring clergyman to his con-
gregation, ''but when they grow up it will be
something for them to boast that their fathers
were not members of the Forty second Con-
gress." 49,.
They tell of one Boston mother who says
of her baby, that ''as it couldn't be handsome
like its papa, its going to be good like it's
This is the first baby on record
that is not the prettiest that ever was-to its
mother.
1t isn't any wonder that it took half
dozen clergymen to christen the King of
Saxony "Jean-Nepomucene- Marie Joseph
Antoine Xavier Vincent Louis G Gonzague-
Francoise de Paule- -Stanislas- -Bernard-Paul-
Felix-Damans."
MIR. John Bullock, of Bristol, r. l., who
will be 1O4 years old in June next, had an at
tack of pneumonia, recently, and when con-
remarked to one of his sons: "That
was severe attack; if I'd been an old man
I guess it would have fetched me"
II say, Pompey," said one freedman to
another, ''ds chile has tried lots of gift fares,
and tings fur prize, but nebber could draw
anything at all. 'Well, Jim, I'd wise you
TO try hand-cart; the chances are thou
sand to one dat you could draw dat
The largest quill of the golden eagle
weighs only sixty-fve grains, and seven such
auills do not weigh more than penny piece.
The feathers of a common fowl weigh only
,hree ounces, and the entire plumage of an
owl weighs only one ounce and half.
EVERY iron rail on north and south rail-
road is perfect magnet, the north end at
racting the south pole of magnetic needle.
80, also, in T rail on such railroad, the
over flange attracts the south pole and the
upper flange the north pole of a needle.
The Rev. De Witt Talmage, of Taber-
lacle notoricty, says the New York Sun, has
changed the wording of the Scriptures with
egard to salt. His reading is: "Ye are the
of the earth, but if the anti
,utrefatc has lost its antiputrefatic, where
With shall it be antiputrefacticatcd? "o a,-
"A Catholic priest in Pittsburg, Pa, noted
or great learning, deep piety, and ready wit,
,nce preached q powerful sermon against
and was about concluding,
When he said, abruptly, "But it you will
rink, why, you might as well give your six. Il
,ences to Barney O. 'Coyle as to any one else.
AN instance of rare honesty, and showing
low dog may desire to pay his board bill,
ecently occurred in Fitchbnrg, Massachu-
etts. A lady saw dog frequently about
er house picking up odd bits which had
een thrown out and one day she called him
q and fed him. The next day he came back,lS
nd as she opened the door be walked in and i
laced an egg on the floor, when he was
gain fed. The following day he brought
mother egg for his dinner; and on the fourth
e brought the old hen herself, who, it seems,
ad failed to furnish the required egg