Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1873-05-08
The Man who Bought a Dog.

For many weeks past Hiram Ripley,
teamster living on Fort street, below the
railroad bridge, had been thinking he
ought to have a good watchdog around
the house and barn, as his wife is much of
the time alone, and as bad boys frequently
raid his barn for old junk. So, the other
day. when farmer came along with big
brindle dog under his wagon and wanted
to sell him for five dollars, Ripley criti-
cised the canine, inquired as to his merits,
and said it was a trade. He tied the dog
UP in the woodshed, fed him bountifully,
and he went into the country after load
of potatoes with a light heart, believing
that no human being could come fooling
around his house and live long. He was
gone over night, and it was afternoon
Friday before he returned home. lie
drove up to the barn and went in by the
stable door to throw open the big doors.
He had just got on to the main floor when
buzz-saw began ripping up and down his
left leg He thought it was buzz-saw, but
it wasn't: 1t was that watchdog Of his. Mrs.
Ripley, desiring to 90 off to a relatives,
had turned the dog into the barn, and he
was watching, as was his business Rip
ley yelled: "Oh! hokey to saltpeter," as
he felt the grinding at his leg, and he made
a long skip into a cornerand faced about
and saw the dog The old canine delib-
erately picked the woolen and flesh out
of his teeth and was then ready for busl-
ness His eyes were fixed on Ripley's
lower vest button, his stump tail stood up
straight, and his fore legs had an uneasy
motion, as if they wanted to reach out al
ter something
Mice old fellow" began Ripley, think
ing to beguile the dog; good doggy-nicc
doggy-dont you know me?"
The dog seemed to have heard the voice
before, and he sat down and lost
little of ms fierce look. This encouraged
Ripley, and he started to go out, but he
had taken but few steps when the dog
took half a yard from the back of his
coat and brought away a piece of flesh.
Ripley fell over the peck measure, and the
dog took another mouthful, but did not
pursue to the corner.
"Oh, iewhittaker to Jerusalemi" grOaned
the dog buyer as he leaned up against
barrel and saw the dog calmly Illuminating
over the last mouthful.
The canine sat up again and smacked
his lips and uttered growl which rever-
berated around the barn like thunder. He
closed one eye and peered at Ripley with
the other, and then moved his paws around
with that reckless, uneasy manner before
mentioned Ripley began yelling for help,
but he hadn't yelled more than three times
before the dog checked him with look
that spoke volumes. Then he went at the
beguiling business again. "Here, Tiger"
he called, swapping his fingers, mice
Tiger-best dog in Detroit-poor old
doggy" Tiger uttered whine and beat
Ben Buffers Dream on the floor with his
stump narrative, while tear OF tender
love stole into each eye The thing was
all right now, and Ripley started out
again, keeping his back behind him. He
had half crossed the floor when he felt
buzz-saws, and red-hot irons, and pitch
| forks jabbing him all over He went up
and came down, turned handsprings and
jumped from the trapeZe, and IN moment
was back in his corner and the old dog
sitting up as before. Ripley couldn't sit
down, and he didn't feel like standing up,
| and so he leaned up against the barrel and
recklessly abused and insuted the dog.
He called him an old loafer, a ring"
thief, a back salary stealer, a carpet-bagger,
and Mormon, and then went on ana
| abused every one Of the canine relatives,
| back to the great grandfather.
At length, after being prisoner Tor
| nearly three hours, some boys discovered
the mans situation. BY his directions
| they went for grocer who keeps revol-
yer, and the grocer came and released the
prisoner by shooting the dog. Ripley
| came up town to have his wounds dressed,
and they numbered twenty three different
bites, and were impartially distributed
over large extent of territory. However,
there's nothing like keeping a family
atch-dog-Detrost Free Press.