The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1873-02-04
The Sandwich Islands.
by MARK TWAIN.

DY MARK TWAIN.
spent several months in the Sandwich
Islands, six years ago, and if | could
have my way about it, [ would 20 back
there and remain the rest of my days. 1t
Is paradise for an indolcnt man. If
man Is rich he can live expensively, and
his grandeur will be respected as in other
parts OF the earth if he is poor he can
herd with the natives, and live on next to
nothing; he can sun himself all day long
under the palm trees, and be no more
troubled By his conscience than a butter.
fly would.
When you are in that blessed retreat,
you are safe from the turmoil of life ;
you browse your days away in long
deep dream OF peace the past is forgot.
ten thing, the present is heaven, the fu.
lure yon leave to take care of itself. You
are in the ccnt2r of the Pacific Ocean (;
you are two thousand miles from the
world; as far as you can see. on any
hand, the crested pillows wall the horizon.
aud beyond this barrier the wide universe
is but foreign land to you and barren
Of interest
The climate is simply delicious-never
cold at the sea level, and never really too
warm, for you are at the halfway house
that is twenty degrees above the
equator. But then you may order your
own climate for this reason the eight in.
hablted islands are merely mountains
that lift themselves out of the soa-a
group Of bells, if you please, with some
(but not very much) "hare" at their ba.
sis. You get the idea Well you take
thermometer, and mark on it where
you want the mercury to stand perma.
nently forever with not more than IL de.
grees variation) Winter and Summer. If
- in the shade is your figure with the
privilege of going down or up or 6 de-
grees at long intervals, you build your
house down on the flare" the sloping or
level ground by the sea shore-and YOU
have the deadest surest thing in the
world on that temperature. And III i,
the climate of Honolulu, the capital of
the kingdom. IF you mark 70 as your
mean temperature, you build your house
Oh any mountain side, 400 or 500 feet
above sea level. IF you mark 80 or 60,
60 l,5OO feet higher. fyou mark for
Wintry weather, 60 on climbing and
watching your mercury. If you want
snow and ice forever and ever, and zero
and below, build on the summit of Mauna
kea, 10000 feet up in the air. If you
must have hot weather, you should build
at Lahama, where they do not hang the
thermometer on nail because the solder
might melt an, the instrument get brok.
en- or You should build in the crater of
kileaua, which would be the same as 20.
ing home before your time. You cannot
find as much climate punched together
anywhere in the world as you can in the
Sandwich Islands You may stand on
the summit Of Mauna Kea. in the midst
Of snow.banks that were there before
Capt, Cook was born, may be, and whilo
you shiver in your turs you may cast
your eye down the sweep of the mountain
side aud tell exactly where the frigid some
ends and vegetable life begins stuuted
and tormented growth of trees shades
down into taller and freer species and
that in turn, into the full foliage and va
rled tlnts of the temperate zone ; further
down, the more ordinary green tone Of
forest washes over the edges of n broad
bar OF orange trees that embraces the
mountain like II belt, aud is so deep and
dark green that distance makes it
black AMI still further down, your eye
rest, upon the levels of the sea shore, !
"here the Suglr.eane is scorchiug in the
sun, and the leathery cocoa palm CHASING
Itself IN tie tropical waves and where
you know the sinful natives are lolling
ah M in utter nakedness and never know
ing or caring that you and your snow and
your chattering teeth are so close by. So
you perceive, you can lock down upon all
the climates of the earth, and note the
kinds aud color, Of an the negotiations,
just with Il glance of the cye-and this
glance only travels over about three miles |
as the bird flies too.
ABOUT THE NATIVES.
The natives of the islands number only
about $4,000, and the whites about 3 1000 |
chiefly Americans. According to Capt. |
Cook, the natives numbered 400 900 less
than hundred years ago. But tho
traders brought labor and fancy diseases
in other words, long deliberate. infalli-
BILE destruction and the missionaries
brought the means of grace and got them
ready. So the two forces are working
along harnoniously, and anybody who |
knows anything about figures can tell you
exactly when the last Kanaka will be in |
Abraham's bosom and his islands in the
hands OF the whites. 1t is the same as
calculating on eclipse you get started
right, you cannot miss it. For nearly
century the natives have been keeping up
ratio Of about three births to i've deaths,
and You can seeiwhat that must result in.
No doubt in fifty years Kanaka will be
a lriosity in his own land, aud as an in
YES ment will be sunerior to a circus
| am truly sorry hat these people are
dying out for they are about the most in
telestlng savages there are Their Ian
guage is soft and musical, it has not a
Kissing sound in it, aud all their words
end with vowel. They would call Jim
Fisk Jimmy Fikhi, for they will even do
violence to proper hame if it CRATES too
harshly in its natural state. The Italian J