The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1873-05-15

: SDe might OBJECT 10 my claiming
, ownership in her child. Besides, to
q carry out my deception, must find
= wife as well as infant, and Mrs. Kings
|. ley was the only one l could conve-
: niently claim. The only difficulty
was to get her consent to the decep-
tion, and this might be done if could
!. only secure a private conversation
with her before / introduced her to
my uncle: then it would be all right.
| watched my opportunity, and
L gained an interview with her before
a she entered the room. I told her, in
!, a few brief and hurried words, the eX-
tent of my difficulty, and how / had
= taken the liberty of acting as papa for
her little one. | then told her | must
find a wife somewhere, and begged
her to allow me to introduce her in
that capacity. She laughed very
heartily at the suggestion-sail she
could comprehend my difficulty, and
consented TO my proposal, and very
rOguishly warned me not to presume
upon the occurrence.
We then entered the .parlOr and /
introduced her as my better half.
My uncle WAS very much pleased
with her, and eOmplimented me up
on my good choice in the selection of
wife. Mrs. Kingsley, of course col.
Ored most charmingly az this COM
pliment, ,..and 1 could scarcely refrain
from laughing.
"You have fine boy here" said
my uncle to Mrs. Kingsley, pointing
to the cradle.
Excuse me, sir" said she, color
ing up again, ''it's a girl.u
/ was dumbfounded. / was ex-
posed in my iniquity. Would my un-
Gle believe me after this ? He look
Ell from me to my pretty landlady
with q puzzled cOuntenance.
'fYOuf husband told me it was a
boy" he said, "and rather suspicious
Iy, too, thought"
"WelI 1 always took It for a bOy,"
was my reply, putting on bold face,
"hut suppose my wife knows best"
Here Mrs. Kingsley fairly screamed
with laughter, and my uncle's stern
face assumed an irOnical smile.
"YOu are a nice father amt yOu?"
he said, touching me with the point
of his umbrella, "nOt to know the sex
of your own child. Why, I knew it
was girl the moment / looked at
it,"
"But, Charley" he said, again ad-
dressing me, "what did yOn do with
the goblet and pap-spOOn l sent to the
little One?"
"Oh, they are perfectly safe, I as
sure yOu," replied; 81 have taken
good care Of them"
"Yes but where in the deuce are
they. l would like very mnch to take
another look at them"
"Well have deposited them i'm a !
bank for safe keeping, but | can !
readily produce them-that is-in |
the course of q weeks time"
He told me to do so, as he wanted |
to see them, and then got out of the |
room, for fear that he might ask me |
some more perplexing questions.
A short time afterward Mrs. Kings
| ley came to me, when was alone in
an adjoining room and saw immedi-
ately that something very humorous
must have happened, for the corners
of her lips were breaking into smiles. |
"DO you know, sir, into what an
awkward predicament you have got |
me?" she enquired, as she took a
seat on the lounge by my side.
Explain YOURSELF" said"
"Why, your uncle came to me a
short time ago, and asked to see my
marriage certificate, and he said he
had some money to settle upon us
Immediately, but wanted to be sure
that everything was right first"
"Did you expose me?, 1 enquired
anxiously."
'NO, sir, did not, for / never en-
ter deception, or anything else by
halves"
1 was so elated that 1 could not
Withstand the temptation of emGrac-
ing her. This did not make her an
cry, for she nestled her head costly
on my shOlder and smiled serenely.
"What answer did you make him."
I then asked.
She hesitated for a moment, and
said:
al promised to produce the mar
riage certificate"
'But we haven't got any," 1 then
remarked.
She INDUCED in quiet little laugh
to herself, but said nothing.
'Mrs. Kingsley-nay, my dear
madam-nO, will call you darling
we are both in serape, and there is
but one way for us to get out OF it.
We must go and get married immedi-
ately. Will you be my wife? ?"
81 shall be delighted" ;" she answered
= I
said that she was ready for frOiic of
any kind.
We lost no time I assure you.
don't think Mrs. Kingsley ever got
into her Sunday clothes in such a
hurry in her life before, while Ispoiled
two pair of suspenders in my frantic
endeaVOrs to be on time. We quite
astOnished the parsOn by our haste,
and at the conclusion of the ceremO-
ny, wonld have forgotten to give
him the usual 'ifee,n - if he had not re-
minded me oft.
We had secured the coveted mar
riage certificate, signed and sealed,
and were now safely out of our diff
culties, as we thought. We had
omitted one preeautiOn, as we pre-
sented the certificate to uncle. 1t was
all right with exception of the mod
ern date.
"Why, how is this ?' said my un-
Gle, gazing at the document through
his specks; "I thought you were mar
ried over a year ago."
$50 we were, uncle" / answered
very sOleDnly.
"How comes 1t, then, that the GER
tificate is dated to-day ?" he asked in
a voice of thunder.
We were struck speechless, both
my wife and /.
HCome," said my uncle, az see
there has been some trickery here.
Own up to it, or 1 will never forgive
you"
did own up to it, and told him
the whole story. l expected il would
make him angry, but it did not; for
he laughed heartily, and said was a
clever rascal, and he was proud of
me.
"But how about the gold goblet and
pap-spOon? You haven't been draw
ing the wool over my eyes about
them, too, have yOu-eh ?"
I told the truth about the goblet
and pap-spoon.
'WhY you are regular trickster,"
said ny uncle, 81 believe you would
deceive Satan himself. But 1 won't
get angry with you, for used to
play the same games when L was
young"
In a word, we became reeOneiled,
and my uncle settled upon me sutti
cient income to enable me to quit my
irksome duty as a clerk. He has
gone back to Vermont, and can but
say in conclusion, that when he pays
US another visit, can show him sew
eral "little IpeOple" that I call my
own, and without telling fslsehOOd.
sweet Revenge.
A revengeful traveller on a certain
railway in this State packed a carpet
bag full of loaded revOlvers and hand
ed it to a agentlemanly baggage-smash-
er, who had ruined three or four
t-,rr,l-, fnr him alrnadu nha snnaah- |