Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1873-04-25
VOLUME XI.
Miscellaneous Reading.
UNCLE SAMMY.

SOME men were born for great things,
Some were born for SMALL
Ome-it is not recorded ,
Why they were born at all; 90
But Uncle Sammy was certain ne had le9lClmate
call j
ONE were born with talent,
Some with scrip and land;
Some with spoon of silver,
And some with a different brand;
But Uncle Sammy came holding an argument in
each hand.
Arguments spouted within him,
And twinked in his little eye;
lie lay and calmly debated
When average babies cry,
And seemed to be pondering grayely whether to
live or die.
But prejudiced on that question
He grew from day TO day,
And finally he concluded
Twas better for him to stay;
And into lfes discussion he reasoned and reasoned
his way.
Through childhood, through youth into manhood
Argued and argued he;
And he married a simple maiden
Though scarcely in love she;
But nc reasoned the matter clearly she hardly
could help but agree.
And though at first she was blooming,
And the new firm started strong,
And though Uncle Sammy loved her,
And tr1ed to help her along,
She faded away in silence, and twas evident some
thing was wrong.
Now Uncle Sammy was faithful,
And various remedies tried;
He gave her the doctors prescriptions,
And plenty of logic beside;
But logic and medicine failed him, and SO day
she died
He laid her away in the church yard,
so haggard and crushed and wan;
And reared her a costly tombstone
With all her virtues on;
And ought 70 have added, "A victim to arguments
pro and con-"
For many a wear Uncle Sammy
Fired away at his logical forte;
Discussion was his occupation,
And alteration his sport:
lie argued himself out of churches, he argued him
self into court.
But alas for his peace and quiet,
One day, when he went blind,
And followed his singular fancy,
And sighted his logical mind,
And married ponderous widow who want of the
arguing kind!
Her sentiments all were settled,
Her habits were planted and grown,
Her heart a starved little creature
That followed will of her own;
And she raised high hand with Sammy, and pro
ceeded to play it alone
Then Sammy he charged down upon her
With all of his strength and his wit,
And many dCXtrOus encounter,
And many fair shOulder-hit;
But vain were his blows and his blowing: he never
could bulge her a bit
He laid down his premises round her,
He scraped at her with his saws
He rained great facts upon her,
And read her the marriage laws;
But the harder he tried to convince her. the harder
and harder she was.
She brought home all her preachers,
AS many as she could
With sentiments terribly settled
And hlv
Who sat with him long at his table, and explained
to him where he stood.
And Sammy was not long in learning
To follow the swing of her gown,
And came to be faithful in watching
The phase of her smile and her froWn;
And she, with the heel of assertion, soon tramped
all his arguments down.
And so. with his life aspirations
Thus suddenly brought to check
And so, with the foot of his victor
Increasingly pressing his neck
He wrote on his face, I'm victim, ana drlfted-
logical wreck.
And farmers whom he had argued
To corners tight and fast
Would wink at each other and chuCklc,
And grin at him as he passed,
AS to say, MY ambitious old fellow, your whipple-
trees Strengthened at last"
Old Uncle Sammy one morning
Lay down on his cOmfortless bed,
And Death and he had discussion,
And Death came out ahead;
And the fact that SHE failed to start him was only
because he dead
The neighbors laid out their old neighbor,
With hOmcly but tenderest art;
And some of the oldest ones fatered,
And tearfully stood apart;
For the crusty old man had often unguardedly
shown them his heart.
But on his face an expression
OF quizzical study lay,
AS if he were sounding the angel
Who travelled with him that day.
And laying the pipes down slyly for an argument
the way.
And one new fashioned old lady
Felt called upon to suggest
That the angel might take Uncle Sammy,
And give him good nights rest
And then introduce him to Solomon, and tell him
to do his best
Form Ballads. By VAL. Carleton.