Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-02-13
rOOR OLD GIGLAMPS.

POOR OLD GIGLAMPS.
Ny ownname is Sam Swailes, Jr. No
3 bad sort OF name, but not lucky one
judging BY experience, indeed, it is the
reverse oflucky.
I am, myself, at Old Mellowdew's Clas
steal and Commercial Academy Old
Mellowdew is not a bad sort of fellow
for be hates sneaking, and tells us to fight
it out among ourselves, if we can't agree
and he docs like to see jolly set-to,
can tell you, although he pretends to be
angry il any one tells him Of a fight.
Why, when little Bloggs, Jr., whopped
that sne2king old Diggle who's head
taller than him, should like to know
why old Mellowdew gave Bloggs, Jr.,
double skies at dinner, and half glass OF
beer out of his own particular Jug, if he
WASN'T pleased at Blogg, Jr.'s, plucky
style Of fighting.
But the best fun we had was teasing
0runer, little snuffy old fellow that
used 70 teach German and music
Mother wouldn't let me learn for ever
20 long. hecause Uncle Joe once fright
ened hersby saying that it took the en-
amel Oft her teeth, and that if you said
raspberry 1s1:n ia German it would sound
like picked walnuts. And mothcr sucked
It all IA, But old Gruner was line fun.
How tho lads used to mock, and play all
sorts Of practical jokes on him; and he
never dared say a word, for fear he'd get
INFO 3 rpUswith old classical and Com
merc1aI md thus get turned off, for he
was very poor. But he never found out
half the tricks played on him, not he.
And that made Sam Swin0ells say his
name couldn't be Gruner, for he was so
very green, he couldn't possibly be
Gruner. However, it didn't last long, for,
one day, We played our last trick on old
Giglamps, as we used to call him, and
this was how it took place:
Now, whenever old Giglamps wanted
to make uS pay particular attention to
anything, he always used to dab his fin
ger on lie desk, and thea clap it against
his nose; md this day he happened to
stand just before Charlie Jackson's place,
who couldn't resist the fun, and so he
rubbed : lot of chalk on the edge of the
desk. IA less than ten minutes one side
OF Grun1enose was as white as goose's
back; ~ fhen Charlie got lot of thick
INK IRON 0c bottom of newly dried-out
lnkstandp&1d then spread it, on the sly,
Just WhsH CLAMPS would put his finger.
Dab cOMa43he finger, and next moment,
such an NNul patch of black on the top
OF his WhE<no that the fellows couldn' t
keep "A Dir tittering any longer, and
bufpt M3a regular roar. Giglamps
stared, Mke couldn't tell what was the
m1ffDT ha irrht Of
lnky 0QE and saw the chalk and ink
on Chx1l desk. He went as white as
A1eo 44 trembled all over; and then
uuse1ng4 30 the fireplace, collared the
AgBoon - Charlie saw this, he ducked
down at once under the desk, and began
70 crawl under the forms, but Giglamps
was after him in jiffy. Then Charley
bohbed up at the other end, and scram-
bled like mad over the desks as hard as
he could tilt, Giglamps steaming and rag.
ing after him, like a mailman, while the
lads SHE'D their books at him as hard as
they could, for they knew he'd never find
out who did 1t, he was in such an awful
dander. Scissors! how we did cheer, and
yell, and shout, whenever Charlie lodged
him; but how we did scream when, at
last, he stumbled and fell under a desk,
With GlglAmps tearing full speed after
mr.. Jnak9' Gruner rushed passed me,
! stuck my1egs out couldn't help it,
pom my WG4d, | cOuldn't-and bang went
Glglamp4 ~ as tluke, on the floor.
Next mon he was up again and turned
upon meA1m an awful curse, as he lifted
wy PoA 1trlke, and then-with cry
q = ne smoking, he sent the poker
nyIn3 9H9ssSse other end of the room,
C0uK.s In his arms, and Rugged
anu a. till l thought | should
mo mo 81. - ocated. And cryi Oh! he "
49, n1 49, 9e SO astonished that they
ce sa.l make noise. You heard
no.cil Dor old Gigiamps sobbing
- = " r. you'd break. As for Char
NC, nc s. now what to do First he
'ouIs 49, Ding, and then got as red
az ~ p, wriggled his arms and
Ns la at last came up to old
IaIulTel hammered out: 'Mr. Cru
ne;, - pardon; didn't mean to
PAN 49, my word l didn't"
lamps looked up through
ms .eas d sobbed out: "Mistare
JAG =. shentleman. Colt bless
ouss snsps NaQ MellOwdew came in tn
see what 81 Che row was ahont and
didnt heafnro when he saw the n,a ans,
Young gcntlemen, will any one he p t;nd
enough 70 explain this?" he said his Inc y,
getting light on his teeth, and his face
turning purple. -''oe
Charlie walked up to him like hero
III you please, Mr.. Mellowdew, I insult.
Cd Mr.. Gruner, and in trying to punish
ne =. Ne made this mess between us: but
r's 1plt." '''
~ Daddy did glare. "verv
Meu, he said, cool as cucum.
oe.s -. - We knew well enough he was
- nhs. rage; 'just fetch my cane. y
H. $780, bed to go; but old Giglamps,
,iS 81 brick, came forward, and
KAT sat M,als Mellowjew, it is quite true
he - ss,ssz acksone did insult me, but
mine rsss3zs| ga "a, 10 tell you Eat he begged
beg = II like no,s a shentleman; and !
.d.1 he,ored if he 1 viii shake bake hands auu :
49, IS. 1o three cheers for DADDY
Is n with will, lust to mt him
90 ne O. Classical and Comme ncis y