South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1873-08-01


There's nothing 10 it, you know
G1WE noticed the other day, in q puff
of country grocer, that be was spoken Of
as 'ope Of the old warehouses Of the trade
We suppose that means he is heavy charger.
H6S-lN what case is it absolutely impos-
sible to be slow and sure Pin the case of
o watch.
ETA DETROIT negro prisoner, on his
way to the penitentiary for larceny, was
asked what he thought of his trial. He
said: When dat lawyer dat Tended me
made his speech, I made shuah I was go
ing to take my ole hat and walk right out
of dat co't-room; but when de odder law
yer got up and commenced talking, knew
l was de biggest rascal on top of de earf.'
@A WORTHY old clergyman in neigh.
boring town is very absent minded, and
has a short memory. IT lie common habit
with him in the sermon to forget something,
and then, after sitting down, to rise up a.
gain and begin his supplementary remarks
with the expression, by the way A few
Sundays ago he got half way through
prayer, when he hesitated, forgot what he
was about, and sat down abruptly without
closing. In a moment or two he rose, and,
pointing his forefuger at the amazed con-
gregation, he said, 'Oh (! by the way-Ameu.
REUNION OF WEST PoINTERs.-Rc-
forring to the sentiment of good fellowship
which has prompted graduates of West
Point who served on opposite sides during
the late rebellion to propose a reunion next
year, DIR. S. b. Hunt, editor of the New
ark On. j. 1dycrtiser, and who was sur.
geon in the Federal army 10 the southwest
for some years, relates the following anec-
dote
This comrade-feeling reminds us Of the
surrender of the Confederate General Gid
con Pillow to his old friend, General a. j.
Smith. 1t was touching scene. Pillow
came into Montgomery ono morning, afoot
and alone. He sat down on q curb.stone
and shook the gravel out of his rough army
shoes, and then walked into Smiths Office,
a back parlor, to surrender. The ceremo-
ny was simple. He said How are you,
Jack 2 The reply was Good God, Gid
is that you? Havo you had your break
fast ? To which Pillow fecling'y respond
ed, mo, and | haven't dollar to pay for
one Pillow got his breakfast, gave his
parole, remarked that if he could not whip
Yankees he could 60 back to Tennessee and
raise cotton, and went on his way rejoicing,
with enough money in his pocket to resume
his place IS one of the best citizens of West
Tennessee.
ANECDOTES OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN. -
The late Senator Pearce, of Maryland, told
mo no was one of the committee of arrange
ment on the Inauguration of Mr.. Lincoln
On being presented to Mr.. Lincoln the lat
ter inquired, Are you James Alfred p
This being answered affirmatively Mr.. Lin
coin said, you are shorter than / am by
six inches; not tall enough to turn away
the balls.' They were to ride in the car
rage together and some apprehensions had
been expressed of the danger of assassina-
ton. The residue of the programme was
laid before, MIR. Lincoln by Senator Foote,
Of Vermont, the chairman Of the committee,
leaving one point of little Importance on
which the committee did not agree, TO be
decided by Mr.. Lincoln. He responded By
an anecdote of an occurrence in his part of
the country. He said it was expected
lawsuit would be decided by the testimony
OF stranger, n very respectable looking
man, dressed in black with a white cravat.
and supposed to be preacher. On being
called to the book and asked whether he
would swear or affirm ho replied, Il don't
caro- d-n which
| SAY.-A gentleman who was in the
habit of interlarding his discourse with the
expression Il say having been informed
by friend that certain individual had
made some ill-natured remarks upon this
popularity, took the opportunity Of cd
dressing him in the following amusing style
Of rebuko 4 say, sir, | hear say you SAT
say i say at every word say. Now,
SIR, although know say i say at every