The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1873-05-01


though the lover himself has not tie
leisure to attend to them.
Thus, for example, everybody is puk-
zled by the extraordinary capriees bf
love making. The ladies who say IN
novels that they cannot understand
"what he could see IN her" are genersl-
ly held up to ridicule as obviously
blinded by iealously; and yet their
want of perception is not only sincere,
but is shard by perfectly impartial
spectators. When we see the way IN
which marriages are brought about IN
the world, we wonder that the pursuit
of matchmaking should be found so in
teresting by amiable persons. Of course,
matchmaking as variety of fortune
hunting is only too Ineligible but
there is matchmaking of much less
sordid variety. All amiable women take
the keenest delight in attempting to
/ pair off their friends and relations ac-
cOrding to their own views of the fitness
of things and yet they always meeting
/ with the strangest and, at first sight,
themostunaccountabled edisappofntments.
The man of intellect has an extraordin-
airy taste for stupid women the hand
some man of fashion is carried off By
poor, ugly, and commonplace women,
ten years older than himself; the pom
pous prig secures the brightest and live
! liest of her sex fortune-hunters attract
Poetesses, and poets marry wives who
can do nothing but mend their shirts.
Such strange contrasts have led to the
development of the plausible theory
that people are attracted rather BY
| qualities complementary than by quail
! ties similar to their own. This doctrine.
however, fails by being too comprehen-
siVe. We must admit that like often
attracts like; and if we add that like
also attracts unlike, we have a theory
which explains nothing, because it ex-
plains every thing. Every match that
ever was or ever viii be made NAV be
brought under one category er the other
but, until we can give some reason for
telling beforehand which set of causes
is likely to be operative in a given case.
we are no nearer an explanation than we
were before. The only general rule at
which we have been enabled to arrive
by experience is the rather discourag-
ing one that people whom we like al
ways marry people whom we dislike.
Friends seem to have perverse delight
in forming new combinations which NAV
ha a
ancient ties. We do not, however. see
our way to erecting any philosophical
theory upon this experience, unless as it
goes to illustrate Artenus Wards doe
trine of the cussedness" of things in
general.
Mr.. Herbert Spencer's analysis may
perhaps help us to understand soma of
the conditions of the problem, though
the philosopher has yet to arise who
will be able to tell us, from the inspec-
ton Of young lady or gentleman, what
viii be the ohorOOtcr of hio OF. her f., ,1ze
partner. In the first place, it is t. be
remarked that some of the elements
which he describes do not enter into the
not enter into its earlier stages. Self
esteem, for example, is the rewsrl of
successful love-making, and strength ems
the passion when it has once been f rn-
ed; but it cannot be the primary cause.
Mere contigUity is very often a sufficient
explanation of the phenomenon. A man
and woman, brought together in Robin
son Crusoe's island, would almost in
evitably fall in love, however uapro1ais-
ing their characters might be; and.
though London is very unlike a desert
island, there are frequently situations,
even in the most crowded societ les, |
where conditions substantially sim lar
are reproduced. There are circlm-
stances under which it would be almost
a breach of good manners not to indulge |
in a little Irritation. A human being |
has such variety of strong feelings in |
a state of solution that any object viii |
be sufficient to determine their crys al |
hzation. This is, indeed, the prim 1ry |
axiom on the subject We have slI |
vast amount of disposable emotion; we |
all long to admire and to be admir- d /
we are grateful for compliments; we |
wish to have something to call our own; |
we want our sentiments to be confirmed /
by sympathy and therefore, when once
any accident has, so to speak, drawn he |
sluices, a whole torrent of ekiot ION |
rushes into the channel provided for it, |
and we attribute to the one external nd |
assignable cause what really results |
from our own states of feeling. beca Use
a particular match has exploded the |
magazine, we absurdly argue that no |
other match would have done equally |
we'll. We set up the first idol at |
comes to hand, and suppose that its
perfections are the sole cause of our
worship, when, in fact, the desire to |
worship something has prepared ~ to /
PROSTATE ourselves before any shr ne /
that offers itself. Love being a com |
pound of so many forces, any one wb ich /
is set in action draws ali the rest after it |
by the principle of association. But /
ali this does not answer the question as /
to how our choice is first determined. |
A young gentleman in London may see
some hundreds of young ladies before
he Is brought down by one who Is per
haps among the least apparently attrac-
tive of the whole number That is the /
puzzle which is constantly recurring
and q solution of it would be of immense /
value to all match-makers, whether of /
the lOftier or the baser variety. What /
is the most promising method of attack |
Which of all the causes that may pre-
cipitate the passion is the most general
ly available? If philosophers could tell (
AS that, they would have taken the first
step toward placing an occupation, now
pursued on purely empirical principles, !
upon true scientific grounds.
To such a question we can, of course,
give no satisfactory answer. It NAV be 4