The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1873-11-01
Humorous.

SIAN old farmer became seriously
i'll, and was urged by his neigh
bors, who thought he was going
to die, to call in minister to pray
for him. 'sTo pray for me! No
sir; am an original Granger, aud
do not want any middle man be-
tween me and the Almighty
Godr"
Counsel Ito witness) - "Now,
sir, what is the character of the
plaintiff in this suit?" Witness
-"Her character is slightly mat
rimonial." Counsel-"Whst do
you mean by slightly matrimo-
NAL characterW Wltness-"She's
been married seven times"
A young man of Albany, Ore.
gon, last Sunday night "gOt the
mitten at the Baptist church be-
cause he caught a young lady by
the hustle and pulled her back to
ask her company home. He is
advised to try some other "holp
next time.
Squirrels 1ady-sAnd how has
your brother Jack been behaving
lately, Sally?" sThankee, my
lady, ee hain't been no wuss, ee
are read the good book as you
sent him, and been twice to Sun
; day school, and it don't seem to
have done no peticular 'arm hat
present."
Once a Michigan Congressman
offered Beau Hickman twenty
cent cigar-Beau replied, =" No
sir, thank you; such cigars are
good enough for Congressman,
but I can't peril my reputation"
A Cincinnati man, who went off
with lis family, except his moth
er-in-law and the house. cat, found
upon his return that the animal
had been talked to death for be-
ing out late at night.
A handsome young lady at Pc
oria made a bet that she could
raise $40 in twenty minutes from
a crowd at a passenger depot; and
by getting tears in her eyes and
claiming to have had her pockets
picked, she was soon possessed of
a shake purse of $62.
"You ought to let me pass
here free of charge, considering
the benevolent nature of my pro-
fession," said a physician to a
toll-gate keeper. ''Not So" was
the reply, ''you send too many.
dead.heads through here now"
The doctor did not stop to argue
the point, but paid his toll and
passed on.
"There now," cried little Bes-
sic, the other day, rummaging a
drawer in the bureau, grandpa
has gone to heaven without his
spectacles."
Trying to do business without
advertising is like winking at a
pretty girl through a pair OF
green goggles. You may know
what you are doing, but nobody
else does.
1t is singular what a little thing
will put a man out. A Jefferson
City lawyer was making a high
flown speech the other day, tell
ing about angels tears, when his
honor said :: ConfiDe your re.
marks to the dog-fght case"
The lawyer sat down.
According to a California paper,
a young lady of that State, in tell.
ing a gentleman of her Yosemite
trip, said the scenery was gor-
geOus-perfectly ravishing-but
she didn't like the style of loco
motion down there. "How's
that?" said her friend, chow did
you locomote?" "Why don't you
Think" she replied, 81 had to
ride a la clothes-pin."
And now appears the annual
story from MoOsehead Lake. The
thoroughly complete angler pulls
ND his line and discovers that a
white fish has swallowed his bait;
trout swallows the white fish /;
he swallows the trout, and the
public are expected to swallow
the story. One swallow does not
make a summer, but the several
here noted are imperative condi-
lions of every summer at Moose