Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
The Recent Census.

NY mind has been strangely drawn OF
late TO the subject OF statistics. l sup
nose the recent census has had something
to do with it. There are certain friends
Of mine who take singular delight in
that census. They pore over 1t as child
pores over CULVER or books OF African
travel. They come away from It's pages
with glow in their eyes and nush upon
their cheeks and a wonderful story upon
their lips. According to the recent
census, it appears that in Rhode Island
alone the number of adult males, OF For.
tuguese descent, who died from spinal
meningitis during the first hall OF the
last decade, was just twice the NUMBER OF
Cashmere goats imported during the sue,
ceeding five years by the entire State OF
New York" They not only say 1t, but
(if am in hurry to go anywhere they
prove it by figures, and they write com
munications to the newspapers, consist
ing mainly of tables and maps, IN ORDER
to promulgate ideas like that.
While / acknowledge that there IS a
sphere in which statistics are useful as
well as entertaining, | am sure 1t would
be well for the world if their limitations
were better understood. The number OF
periodicals that have been started on
statistics in the United States, and have
miserably persisted of them is lamenta
ble A corrected list would make an In
teresting chapter in our next census.
young friend of nay own started one OF
these papers He took sheet Of fools
cap and two or three lead-penclls, and
the then recent census, and began in this
fashion: Here is a community with
population of so many thousands; l may
calculate, on general principles, that al
least twenty persons IN every thousanc
will take the paper the first year-WhlcI
gives handsome paying circulation tt
begin with. Then so many columns Of
advertisements will come to so much pei
week, and pretty nearly all OF this may
be put down to account of profits. Sc
the second year will open with an in
crease of say-to be Notwithstanding
in circulation and the same in advertise
ments.
tried to wean him away from his pop
ulations and his COMPOUNDED sums II
arithmetic But it was of no use. lie
went around town for about three weeks
in a hectic condition with his pockets full
of lead-penclls, and little note books con
tanning all sorts of deceitful calculations
based on the recent census. At the enc
of that time the Morning Kagn!t5er made
it's appearance. l caught occasional
glimpses of the editors haggard counte
nance as he fitted home for his night!
repose at eight o'clock in the morning
But why prolsng the melancholy tale
Enough to say that my young friend ha.
long since gone West.
And then | have another friend who
believed in the doctrine of the annihi
lation of the souls of the wicked. In fact
he was generally acknowledged to be The
foremost expounder of that doctrine IL
the country. Well, what does he do bu
write novel of society-with little OF
nothing in it concerning his pet doctrine
That is not SO pathetic as the fact thai
he too became a slave to statistical delu
sions. He had taken some sort of pr
vate census of his own, by which he haC
determined that there were in the United
States forget how many millions Of PEG
Pile, who believed with himself as to the
matter of humiliation. There were the
avOwed believers-sO many millions; anC
there were the believers who dared no.
avow-a great many millions more; anC
he was the celebrated Expounder-and sc
many thousands out Of every million I'll
was quite low estimate, [ thought
would buy the novel, of course. | my sell
was fresh in the faith Of statistics in those
days, and remember how / envied thai
man his copyright-till six months after
the date of publication the publishers sent
in their bill for stereotype plates. -"1ht
Old CCblnet," ,.ScT-lJner's for -HUrch.