The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1873-04-23
House-Hunting and Children - Tho
Crime or Infancy.

events
of his life? ''Moving" on the 1st Of May is
faint pleasure beside it. In the latter case
you have a fixed idea that you are going
somewhere, and that after week or SO of
misery you will be oil right but the blissful
uncertainty of house-hunting possesses a
mirifc charm. The HERALD advertisements
are examined critically before breakfast, and
such as appear to suit are cut out. The Wild
est hopes rise in your breast as you dispose OF
the matutinal meal What follows through
the live-long day is happiness itself. The
street cars run close to where you want to go,
the agents are painstaking and polite, the
rents are ridiculously low and the janitress or
janitor is always person that inspires conf
dence and respect. When by some kindly
| whim of fortune the keen luxury of
the house-hunt is kept up for a
whole week the favored individual has
touched upon that region of bliss which
Immediately surrounds Elysium. This over
Joy sometimes so clogs the spirit that strong
men and women have been known to go crazy
under its influence, and for this reason it is
that the Warehouses; receive SO many additional
raving lunatics after the LIST Of May. There
is at least one lady in New York who has
tasted the delicious sweets of house-hunting
until she is on the verge of mental derange-
ment She has written us a letter that will
speak for ITSELF
To THE EDITOR or THE HERALD
VIII you be kind enough to inform me what are
We to do with our children l have been house,
huntng-l0okng for rooms. The first question
asked by the landlord or agent is, How many are
there IN family II You happen to admit having
you, as though you were thief or a pckpocket,
and informs you, IL won't have a child In my
he the 3ns N
children exists vas reading an account in the
HERALD Of Methodist minister being turned out
OF his pulpit on account OF his eight children and
his age. As he was only forty-tw0 it is more than
likely they thought his family might still increase.
Knowing you are friend to the oppressed,
ask you, Tor mercy's sake, what are we to do
with the children Perhaps you might suggest to
put them all on it, and let them rema ain until they
are men and women grown SUBSCRIBER.
What are we to do with the children,
quotha? This lady has evidently had about
weeks house-hunting. Her question is
troublesome one. 1t has often been noted
that persons on the verge of lunacy put just
such puzzling questions. Once, however, start
such query, and philosophy finds itself
nailed by peculiar fascination to the task Of
replying If every landlord in New York
says, II won't have child in my house."
the case becomes serious. The landlord evil
IDENTIFY has no faith in the precept of ''Suffer
little children to come unto Me-" Of such,
he may be willing to admit is the Kingdom
OF Heaven; but not of such, by all the house
hold gods, he will say, shall be my French
flats from the street door sill to the clouds. It
is indeed very hard on mortals who in these
times have the misfortune to be born very
young. If they could come into the world
old enough not to have the stigma of infancy
resting upon them it would be so much better.
If they were puppies or kittens at
first, perhaps the intolerant landlord would
have more humanity and compassion. We
admit that the time when science will bring
men and women into the world full grown
and educated, with all the academy 'extras' in
their heads and heels, seems distant. We hardly
think it desirable, either, that we should 90
so far back in Darwinism as the kitten and
puppy alternative would demand. 1t is
difficult question. Fashion, brutal philoso-
rhies and Rosenzweigs are the declared ene-
mics Of children before they come into the
world, and New York landlords have now added
themselves to whooping cough, measles and
cholera infantum as their enemies when they
open their eyes to the sun. The staying of
the frst-born, which set oil Egypt wailing,
took off great many grown persons, and
others in hobbledy -hoyhood, showing that
there was no intention then to murder any
particular age. Herod, however, took step
in the Holy Land which may be in
structive now. 1t will be remembered that
there was at the time great scarcity of lodg-
ings in Bethlehem, and all over the province,
in fact The Roman census had produced
an artificial list Of May. Herod doubtless
dabbled in real estate and the slaughter of the
innocents may have had among it's minor
causes his objection to having children in the
houses built on his corner lots. In the Cathe-
dral Of Notre Dame, at Paris, there is a screen
on which this scene is carved in wood, and
painted over. The most remarkable figure
is Roman soldier, who with appraised sword,
is about slicing an infant whom he holds by
one leg. There is a look of rubicund delight on
the rude soldiers face, which shows how thor
oughly he enjoys the sport. Now it strikes
us that he is genuine type of the baby
hating landlord of New York. To follow out
his ideas it would only be necessary to take the
latter's rooms, and then, say on the I'd of May,
let him go through the house and select such
babies as he might desire to slaughter. The
scene in the back yard would. we believe,
faithfully represent the scene on the
screen in Notre Dame. There is, unfor-
tunately, law to interfere with this pastime;
but with some judicious lobbying it might be
repealed. Swift, in one of his most earnest
moments proposed a cure for Irish distress, in