The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1873-12-11

door. 11e knew by net lace Iu1t sHe
had not yet arrived.
1t was Ilalf-psAt seven. The play
must be given up. II was too late for
that. She had staid somewhere to
dine. Mr.. Jones grew angry.
ASend up the dinner, Biddy," he
said, and dinner was served: but be-
fore he had eaten ten mouthiuls, an
account that he had read that very
morning of a lady who had been
drugged and carried off 10 New
Jersey swamp, where she was robbed
OF jewels and money, aud left Tor
dead. occurred to him.
tAaggie," he called to the girl now
was your mistress dressed %
"Sure she had on her black silk. and
them Elegant bracelets aud earrings
she had for her Christmas" " said Mag
gle. ''Och, mebbe shes been robbed
iv'em-wbo knows ?"
Mr.. Jones put down his fork and
eat no more.
He wandered to the door again, and
tried to think what could be done. =
Wnen nine O'Clock struck he was in
despair. When ten o'clock came
without bringing his wife. he be-
thought him of certain friends who
might have urged her to spend the
evening, aud made the best of his way
first TO one residence and then to an
other, with no success.
1t was now plain to him that Mrs.
Jones had met with some accident. 1t
was eleven o'clock and still she did
not return. Had she been able TO
walk or ride he argued, she would
have gained her home in some way.
Thoughts of the Morgue filled him
with terror. Was she lying dead
there with her long hair all about her
shoulders? Was she in some hospit-
al? Where was she-where
Mr.. Jones by this time, was pale as
ghost, and terror had absolutely
followed his cheeks. With rumpled
hair, limp collar and disordered cra-
vat, he walked into rhe station house,
as the clock sUrnck twelve, and an
nOunced the terrible fact that his wife
was missing. The inquiry which fol-
lowed startled him as the explosion of
b0mb-shell might.
''Who's she gone with? What's his
name? ?"
@Sir!" yelled Mr.. Jones, "My wife ~
'FThey are all alike, them missing
ladies" said the official, generally
turns out the same. You'd have heard
If any accident had happened. Com
mon sense tells you that. However,
we'll keep lookout"
The Mortified Jones flew away
again, and reporter, WhO had been
listening with open ears to all that
had been said, flew TO the Office of his
paper and made up paragraph head
ed: 'tELoPEAIENT EXTRAORDINARY
MOTHER DESERTS HER LITTLE CHILD" !"
etc.
On the way home, Mr.. Jones stop
ped at the telegraph office and sent
dispatches to Mrs. Jones' parents and
to his own Worded thus:
"Come at once. Lavina is missing" !"
AS he gave the message he burst into
tears and awakened the sympathy of
the whole establishment. Two young
men even came to the door to look af-
ter him as he hurried down the street
which was a great deal for telegraph
people, who are generally the most
apathetic in the world /; but they shook
their heads and expressed the police
officers opinion when he was ont of
hearing.
Poor Mr.. Jonesi He had never been
frightened beforehand all that he could
do seemed to have been done. lie
reached his door in dripping per-
spiratiOn, and with icy cold hands
opened it somehow, Staggered into
the parIOr, and there-yes, there sat
Mrs. Jones serenely tanning herself.
'Lavinal I" screamed Mr.. Jones, and
tumbled in heap upon the sofa.
Dear me said Mrs. Jones, you
bauan'f haoD EIau- ~
Why didn't you retire?
"TheH you are not deadI" said Mr..
Jones. +" never expected TO see yon
again alive"
ooh, you'd have heard if anything
had happened to me, " said Mrs. Jones.
How little strength of mind you
have.0
Where have you been ?" said Mr..
Jones. sternly.
"Oh, next door," said Mrs. Jones.
''They had little party-music and
such elegant refreshments And there
was a very agreeable young gentle
man there. We sang Duets all the
evening. and he brought me home"
6 Lavina, l am choked!" said-Mr.
Jones.
" Is it worse for you to be frighten-
ed than ?" asked Mrs. Jones. '.Noao
you know how ii feels, Charles"
Mrs. Jones glowed with triumph.
Mr.. Jones glowered with displeasure.
After while, however, his face
assumed look of diabolical satisfac-
ton.
''To think that l should have tele-
graphed to all our relations" he said.
" What ?" screamed Mrs. Jones.
"And reported you at the station
house, where they told me you had
eloped," said Mr.. Jones.
6 1t will be in the papers to-1nor-
rev." cried Mrs. j.
''Probably," said Mr.. Jones.
l don't like to end this story in an
unorthodox manner; but L must tell
the truth. The tables were turned on
Mrs. Jones. The influx of terrified
relations next day the awful report
that appeared in the Daily Bother, and
the long tram of reporters who inter
viewed her for twenty -four hours,
made her bit of revenge anything but
satisfaction to her. Aud as for Mr..
Jones, any one who understands a
mans nature will know that he was
not reformed by the 'tscare." He stays
out when he chooses, aud does as he
pleases, and Mrs. Jones it is who has
learned lesson.
What is sauce for the gander is not,
and never will be, sauce for the goose.
A man may vanish for any number
OF hours at his pleasure; woman
must be where some male relative
may lay finger on her from The time
she is born until the moment she dies,
or pay the penalty.