Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1873-01-10

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simple this is; but you see
it required so much figuring.
But l did it!
I wanted to take a fresh chew about
this time, but concluded I had better
hold on to the old one for awhile.
After this we had a little percentage.
All! [ know something about that,
for I used to be in Wall street once.
(No, it wasn't keeping an apple
stand, either.)
The main question was simply this:
If Smith buys of Jones eight hun
dred and eleven shares of stock atnine-
teen and half, and don't sell out, but
holds on, and then sells two hundred
and twenty shares of stock at twenty
seven; and if Jones buys of Smith
twelve hundred and two shares of stock
at thirty-three, and does sell out, and
again buys four hundred and sixteen
more Of Smith at sixteen and seven
eighths, which he does not pay for
how much does each man make and
lose by the several transactions? And
what is the per centage of profit and
loss to each one, after they have bal
anced their books?
It's lie! [ didn't sell apples on
Wall street; no, nor peanuts either; !;
and | have got that question stated cor
rectly.)
Ny previous experiencein Wall street
enabled me to answer this with much
particularity and correctibility-(that
is good word y for [ had been engag-
ed in precisely the same kind of trans
action once myself, and remembered
distinctly what [ received and paid af-
ter I got through, and how much I
made and lost by the operation.
(And, by the way, if it hadn't been
for that operation, l shouldn't have
been "competing" for promotion.)
I think [ rather astonished the ex-
aminer at my promptness in handing
in my answer to that.
I was quite sure of the promotion
now!
Now was propounded proposition
in algebra. But I didn't know it was
algebra at the time. '2ssz -
It was in this wise:
If it takes an elephant fifteen min
utes to walk up an inclined plane, how
long will it take him to slide down the
other side?
I looked at this question moment,
and it rather puzzled me. You see it
didn't state how highthe inclined plane
was, nor at how many degrees the an
gle was.
So ventured to interrogate the ex-
aminer in regard to this, thinking that
possibly something might have been
left out.
"Whv, you must guess at that" said
he, cor work it out by algebra
And he smiled affably..
Algebra! By Jove! so it was! I
took it all in at a glance!> Algebra
How very stupid Of me not to have
seen it; and | felt rather mortified, and
apologized for having troubled him.
But he said it was nothing-he had
been so before himself. l don't exact
ly see how his remark applied, but
supposed he knew, and sat down again.
And then [ went to work.
[ made q represent the apex, the
the base, and d the elephant.
But [ am afraid that you haven't got
sufficient algebraic signs in your typi-
cal collection; so l won't send you the
full working out of this problem.
: Suffice it to say that in about twen-
ty-fve minutes [ had it!
Five-nineteenths!! J!
But then, as / told the examiner
when | handed him the answer, it de-
pended a great deal upon how fast the
elephant travelled, because
"Oh, of course" said he, rather ab-
stractedly; "of course. That's under
stood, of course"
But he smiled becomingly upon me!
You've seen those circus fellows,
havn't you, that perform on the stage
and who, after going thro'
some terribly mediocre performance,
in which you can see no point what
ever, stand on one leg, and throwing
the other backward, inclining their
heads forward and throwing their
hands upward, smile admiringly upon
the audience and say-"Hoop-laW
Well, that's the way I felt Just then,
and wanted to say 'hoop-la!' bad, but
| didn't.
Now we had a little tussel on the
question, and this is what
stuck most all the fellows except me.
By this time, it had got to be after
twelve, and [ wanted a drink bad; but
| concluded to wait.
And mark this query in currency
we'll.
seventy-six silver roubles are equal
to forty-three golden forins. A gold
dollar weighs l5.9182467 grains in sill
yer avoirdupois. Now, if the seventy
six silver roubles and the forty-three
golden forins are melted down, what
will one of the pieces made of this
weigh compared with
what a gold dollar weighs in silver,
avoirdupois?
I thought would 60 out and take
a drink now, but [ abstained.
[ reflected few minutes when sud-