The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-03-22
ANECDOTES.

FISH STORY.-"l remember one time
it had been blowing hard for several weeks
of and on, and there was hardly a dish
OF flsh to be got for love or money. Hav-
ing little to do, a foreman at one of the
shops here, named Tom Round, got hold
OF turbot which hardly had an ounce
of flesh upon it; mere skin indeed. and
amused himself by trying to sell it. But
it was no go, and no wonder The thing
had been kicking about the shop for
nearly week, and had several very narrow
escapes of the refuse basket. Directly
anybody took it up, being about as limp
as shirt-cOlar in shower of rain, its
want of flesh was at once detected. Well,
what does Mr. Tom do, but cut long
stick into skewer, and thrust it into the
nape of the fish's neck, and so right along
his backbone down to the beginning OF
his tail 1t was now as stiff as if it had
been out of the water twenty-four hours.
Then he gets great wallet Of wet paper,
makes pad upon the board and throws the
turbot on it. 1t was a great success-the
creature looked as plump as bun. 1t lay
there an hour o. two, and great deal Of
chatf had been fired over it, when behold
you, along comes gentleman in nankeens,
buff waistcoat, and blue coat with gilt
buttons. He stops and eyes the deceitfu
one with quite pleasant smile.
SO How are turbots to-day?' asks he.
Very scarce indeed, SIR was the an
swer; that one is seventeen -ani-six.
60 Is there enough fish there for eighth
g" All depends upon what sort of feeders
they are, replied Tom, hardly able to con-
tain himself, or keep his countenance; at
all events you won't find its equal in the
trade
"' Will you bate halfcrown?' says old
nankeens.
90 Half crown, sir = exclaims Tom no
sir; L don't mind knocking off the odd six
pence
g. Very well, I'll have it, says the other
Tom dursn't give it to any of the mon
to clean. He did that himself, popped it
into basket, porter was called, the GUS
toner paid his money and departed, and
Tom shut up the shop and departed too
Three days afterwards, judge Mr.. Toms
horror, on suddenly discovering himself face
to face with that selfsame gentleman. There
was gravity in the old chaps look that
boded ill to the salesman. To use the ras-
calls own expression, he felt as if he should
have liked the earth to open and swallow
him up.
"' believe said the old gentleman, fix
ing keen and steady eye on the culprit
you are the person of whom | purchased a
turbot one day this week?'
Rounds heart thumped heavily against
his side. He felt the blood mount to his
cheek. There was no escape.
"' 1t might have been M mate, SIR re-
Piled he; were very much alike
"' No, you are the man, am certain
"' Well, sir stammered the conscience
one, can't say. You see, sir, | see, sir,
SO many people in a day sir; but if it was
ME, sir, l hope it ate well, sir, though it
can't be always depended upon this time of
year, sir
"' AS regards the fish, what there was of
it, resumed the customer, ate well enough,
but it was remarkably poor, and no wonder,
for we found the cause of its want of sub
stance on its coming to the table
"Tom felt a great sense of relief at this,
but his eyes nearly started out of his head
with astonishment as the other continued.
80 At some time that poor creature had
swallowed piece of stick, which had fore
ed its way right down beside the spinal col
umn to its very tail. Its sufferings must
have been intense. However the thing
could have lived at all, / can not think. 1t
is remarkable fact in the natural history OF
fishes. The stick I have taken care of, and
with its legend placed it in cabinet of Gu
riosities which I possess.
With that the old chap departed, leav
ing Tom heartily blessing him for his cred
ulity, and thanking his own stars at having
escaped so easily."-CasseHs Magazines
PADDLE Your OwN CANoE-Judge s.
gave his son a thousand dollars, telling him
to go to college and graduate. The son re-
turned at the end of the Freshman year
without dollar, and with several ugly hab-
its. About the close of the vacation the
vacation the Judge said to his son:
-" Well, William, are you going to college
this year,"
Have no money, father"
But gave you thousand dollars to
graduate on,"
Its all gone, father"
Very well, my son it was all | could
give you; you can't stay here; you must
now pay your own way in the world"
A new light broke in upon the vision of
the astonished young man. He accommo-
dated himself to the situations he left home,
made his way through college, and gradua-
ted at the head of his class studied law. be-
came Governor of the st tie of New York,
entered the cabinet of the President of the
United States, and has made a record for
himself that will not soon die out, being
none other than William HI. Seward.