Rapides gazette. (Alexandria, La.) 1869-187?, 1873-09-06
MISCELLANEOUS PARAGRAPHS.

4" gadding IL
after q black horse, believing That any
Chinaman who does Will soon pine and
die.
Two business partners in Cincinnati
liked each others wives 30 well that they
both divorced and remarked, and now
live as happily as can be.
A pRY-GooDs clerk in Springfield, ILL.,,
was much mortified the other day because
a young lady who didn't agree about the
price called him q miserable elongated
tape-worm."
THE plans of the new Courthouse In
Chicago are severely criticised: one VIII
ter says: "The general erect Is tnaL OF 2
cigar-box with a pickle bottle az one emo
and a lot Of pepper castors on top"
The club handled parasols are vindi- |
eating their usefulness. A young lady
recenfly, at Morristown, "laid out"
savage dog with one of these airy TRIES
In the most effectual manner.
The memory of William Tell was hon
ored at an Indiana Schutzen Verein, re-
payne bottle at his fathers head, just
grazing his scalp but splitting all the
champagne.
n
other day with all the family excepting
his mother-in-law and the house cat,
found upon his return that the animal had
been talked to death for being out late at
night.
A LONELY fellow advertises In q Chica-
20 paper for a wife, and intimates that he
prefers a poor girl. The Louisville Cou-
er-.Jouy,saI tells him to take the first one
who responds, and he will be almost GER
tain to get q poor one.
EPITAPH IN A CHURCH-YARD IN IRELAND.
Here lies Pat Steele.
Who was he? What was he?
What's that 10 you2
Di-Do-Dm
In Springfield, Mass, recently, a young
bridal couple applied for temporary lodg-
ings at the police station They had been
married that day, but had had quarrel
with the old folks, who had turned them
out into the street homeless and penni-
less.
A WICKED wretch in Madison, Wis,
took seat in church directly behind his
rival who had SCOT away" with Sarah
Jane, and during the service slipped an
active chinch bug down his back. 1t made
the fellow so uneasy that he was COM
PEELED to leave the church, and the other
fellow went home with the girl.
1T Is customary to assert that, If pun
ishment for crime could only be made
certain and prompt, criminals would be
struck with terror, and crime greatly di-
minished. But one thing seems to mill
tate against such conclusion. Society
cannot hope to infiict upon her knaves
any more prompt and certain punish
ment than nature does upon her fools
and yet the latter keep on kindling fire
with kerosene oil.
The, new code of Iowa which take
effect on September LIST has this wise pro
vision: The Governor shall grant M
pardon for murder in the first degret
without previous notice, and the reasons
thereof, published in one newspaper a
the capital and one in the county WHERE
conviction was reached, for four success
i've weeks previous to the meeting OF TN
Legislature, to which body the Governor
shall then present the matter and abide By
their decision. -.
Ii young ladies who pride themselve
on their skin and tact in the art of fiirta
ton could only hear all that is said o
them behind their backs, we think they
would renounce their indicate blandish
ments forever, and blush, II not past tina
wholesome indication of shame, for tn,
false part they had so far played on so
ciety. The practical flirt Is looked upoI
by all young men, save those greer
enough to be her victims, merely as
frivolous piece of human trumpery, witt
whom it may be well enough to Will
away an hour or two now and then, whel
nothing better in the way of amusemen
offers.
The TOUGHEST OF CATs.-There Is
man on Franklin street who has been en-
gagged in the past two months in might,
effort to kill cat. In that time that un
fortunate animal has explored the bottom
of every sheet and stream of water With
six miles of Danbury, has had an unin
territorial taste of the several new varietie
of powder, and has got so it can tell il
the dark, without looking around, tn
difference between a half brick and
whole one. The man himself hasn't 60
whole piece of clothing in his wardrobe
and has almost entirely lost the use
one leg from rheumatism contracted Will
drowning the cat, and has more scratche
on him than the survivor of four wive:
His aged father says he will take chat
outiu the yard on a pleasant afternoon
and will sit there for two hours at tim
and look at that cat and swear.-Da,sbur
Neps. N
QUALITY OF AIR IN DIFFERENT LOCAL
TIEs.-An interesting paper, valuable in
physiological point Of view, on the quar-
tity of air taken from various localitie:
was lately read by DR.. Sigerson, of Dub
lin, before the Royal Irish Society.
air from an iron-factory he found, on el
animation, carbon, ash and iron; the la
ter substance was in the form of littl
hollow balls, each about two-thousandth {
an inch In diameter, the iron being so thi
that the light passed throughit. In shir
factory air were found filaments of line
and cotton. Antimony-from the type
metal probably-was discovered in the a
of printing-rooms. Stable air was asce
tanned to contain floating hair and scales
and in the air through which tobace
smoke was passing, nicotine, the ,poiso
Of tobacco, appeared in little globules.