Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1873-04-17
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

you don't do that again. said the pig
to the boy who cut his tail off
A YOUNG New Yorker has obtained
tweny-seven different card photographs
of future wives who are in store for him,
obtained from as many different sorceress-
es. There is nothing left for him now but
to join the Mormc,s.
An indignant r5ung woman in Utica,
who had not received cards To friends
wedding, sent in a bill of 500 for twenty
weeks board of q canary, which she had
cared for during that friends winter in
the city.
Postal cards will be convenience to
people who wish to tell you all they
know Smith says to his landlady: ANY
letters for me to-day? And she
answered: "Only two postal cards, but
there's nothing particular on them
A GENTLEMAN took the following tele-
gram to telegraph office: Il announce
with grief the death of Uncle James
Come quick to read will. | believe We
are his heirs-John Black" The clerk.
having counted the words, said: There
are two words too many, sir" "All right,
cut out with grief. "
An urchin of seven years went into a
barber shop at Racine, Wis and ordered
the barber to cut his hair as short as
shears could do it, He was asked if his
mother ordered it in that way. No"
said he, school commences next week,
and we have got a school ma'am that pulls
hair
THE Jonesboro (Ga) Times recently
published a vigorous poem, in which ap-
appeared this stanza:
When spring comes with her floral gifts,
Well gather flowers sick and sore,
To decorate the young, the fair
The editor explains by saying that the
third line should read: We'll gather
flowers rich and rare" But the explana-
ton comes to late. The poet has COM
mitted suicide
SOME time ago a New Hampshire farm
er discovered a large toad near his bee
hive, actively at work catching and de
vouring bees. With that wonderful for
bearance and kindness of heart character
istic of New Hampshire farmers, he ten.
derry picked up that frog and carried him
| a half mile away from the hive. The next
| morning that identical frog was back
again at the old stand. actively at work as
before. He again took him up, carried
him long mile away, and dropped him
But in twenty-fOur hours he was back
again, reducing the number of bees as
successfully as ever.
AN AGED BIRD.-The death in that city
| of the oldest robin on record is announced
| by a Troy On. " newspaper. He was
taken from the nest in June 1857, and so
was nearly sixteen years old. For ten
| years he sang ceaselessly from morning
until evening. Then his pipe begun to
| show signs of giving out For four years
| he has had no feathers on his head or neck
and for one year he has been totally blind
| not being able to find his perch, and re
naming, poor bird, ANONYMOUSLY on the
bottom of his cage. He had always re
| sided in the same cage in which he wa:
first confined
| TRAVEL IN WALEs-The only convey
ance between Aberystwith and Aberayron
| Wales, is two-horse wagonette. First, sec
| Ond and third class fares are booked in this
| primitive conveyance, and the following
curious distinction is made between the
passengers: Firstclass passengers are al.
| lowed to retain their seats throughout the
journey; second-class have to get out and
walk up the hills, which are both numer-
Gus and steep, after the fashion of the
Welch hills; third class have not only to
get out at steep places, but have to assist
in pushing the vehicle up them. This ar
| rangement works very well, but the pace
is not great.
LUXURY OF DOGs.-Professor Tracy re-
Gently read a spirited essay on dogs, be
fore the St. Louis Farmers Club. After
telling what he knew about good dogs, he
| used his mathematics upon the question
with about the following results: There
are, according to his estimate, about 5000
600 waste dogs; the food they eat would
fatten 100000 hogs, worth, say, $50
100000; add to this a few millions for
sheep killed by these ravenous CANNES,
and we begin to see what these dogs cost
this country Just think of it: dogs
enough to half pay the interest of our pub
lie debt.
CONTRAST
The exquisite charm of springs first ringing laugh
We measure only by the winters gloom;
The wallng winds, the whirling SHOWS, make
In our half frozen hearts for sunshine after,
If every morn We're fair and all days golden,
And only emerald turf our footsteps trod
Our sated souls would tire Of velvet sod.
our eye in spells Of snow-capped peaks beholden !!
We gauge the iow'rets beauty by the mould
That lies 20 long and dark It's sweetness over;
As absence makes his rapture for the lover,
Who no light till he fond eyes behold
So God be praised for wintry blasts and SHOWS
That end their lessons when the violet blows.
Hdrper'S Magazine.
SMOKING FOR THE PLAGUE.-Thomas
Hearne, in his diary, writes: '170-'21,
January I'd have been told that in the
last great plague in London, none that
kept tobacconists' shops had the plague.
1t is certain that smoking was looked upon
as most excellent preservative, insomuch
that even children were Obliged to smoke.
And | remember that | heard formerly
Thom Rogers, who was yeoman- beadle,
say that, when he was that year, when the
plague ragged a school-bov at Eton, all the
boys # that school were obliged to smoke
IN the school every morning, and that he
was never whipped SO much in his life az
he was one morning for not smoking"
AN honest old PENNSYLVANIA farmer had
a tree on his premises he wanted to cut
down, but being weak in the back, and
having dull ak, he hit upon the follow
ing plan: Knowing the passion among
his neighbors for coon hunting, he made
a coOn's foot out of a potato, and
proceeded to imprint numerous tracks to
and up the tree. When all was ready, he
informed his neighbors that the tree must
be filled with coons, pointing to the exter-
nal evidence made with his potato foot
The bait took, and in short time half a
dozen fellows with sharp axes were chop
ping at the base of the tree, each taking
their regular turn. The party also brought
dogs and shot guns, and were in ecstasies
-ha0 0tt,-: tod Ia,,l lctf fa+