Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1873-08-22
MARRIED BY TELEGRAPH.

Il
"MR. LEARY, are you married man
sir9"
every, SIR"
"Very, why do you say W"
because my dear little wife and l are
bound together by wires"
"Latimer Leary, you talk enigmas."
"Then sir, to be as plain as printer,
will inform you that l was married by
telegraph"
"You don't say sol"
eyes, do"
"Then tell the company all about the
affair.""
81 will, with pleasure. Ladies and
gentlemen, my wife is a second cousin
and was named Leary. She once resided
in the city of indianapolis, while l was
resident of Centreville, in the same State
l was bachelor of thirty, and full Of
romance and general love. l say general
love, because had not made concentra
tion.
"Why don't you take a wife?" was
eternally buzzed in my ears.
"Whom will | take? ?"
"Your relative, Kate Leary."
"Kate Leary, why she is my own
cousin"
"Only a second cousin" they would re.
tort; "and your opposite, Latimer; Kate
is blonde, and you are dark as Erebus
or the ace of clubs"
| never had seen Miss Leary, but this
continued association of the young .ady
with my welded life had an influence.
One day q member of Congress ex
claimed; "Mr. Leary, were l single ]
would assuredly pay court to your cousin
AS am married, and you are my best
friend, can earnestly hope you will pos
sess the luxury"
AT this period was merchant Hav.
ing discharged a thieving clerk, was so
confined to my store that a journey to In.
dianapolis was out of the question. /
was growing almost wild to see one
whom all praised-so many wished me to
wed.
In few days from the call of my legis
lative friend, his brother, noted judge,
appeared at my store.
The judge was also my devoted ally
"a position intensified by his recollec
tion of being educated by my deceased
father.
Drawing daguerreotype from his coat
said he, 81 wish to show you some
thing nice. There, what do you say tc
that ?"
"Who is it ?" 1 cried with enthusi
asm
"This, my dear friend, is Miss Kate
Leary, the young lady l wish you tc
marry"
"Tell me" exclaimed, sis she all they
claim for her?"
my dear friend honestly as | value the
truth, | have not heard her sufficiently
praised"
"Why don't some man try his luckr'
"I'm glad you ask. Simply because
she is over-Courted, and consequently
hard to please. She is romantic, and
l clearly see, not winable by ordinary
methods"
"You say she is very particular"
"She is, sir"
"Then goodbye for me-"
"Not at all; she is rapturous over your
likeness, and sends her cousinly love, with
an invitation to visit her. l pledge you
to not emitting single point in your body
caliber or character"
"Do you consider her daguerreotypo
accurate?
81 can tell you it don't flatter her She
has extraordinary beauty, and the kind
that is more striking in animation or con
versation."
While mutual friends in Centrevillt
were lauding my fair cousin, mutua
friends in indianapolis were decided in
their eulogies of me, and preparing hel
mind for an alliance.
| am not selfconceited. Believing sucl
q concord must be born of an obvious
fact, settled on the idea of marrying this
wonder in beauty, soul and accomplish
ment
My intent was quickly confirmed upon
hearing that very wealthy and influen
tial banker from Gotham was in the melt
ing mood. l remember it was midnight
/ limited from my store the last batch o.
chronic loungers, and selected the bes
stationery in my establishment.
/ was to write my first letter to Kate.
Such reply as | received! Well, you
must see it-you shall see it. have gooc
gas works, but am inadequate. In brie
time we learned that each knew the othel
well. The much said by so many, many
mutual friends, superadded to our daguer
reotypes and letters, made us compre
hending couple. In fact we confessed
our love-a full, round, ripe and luscious
article. There could be no unsafety in thu
case.
Our lineage was in common and every
fact known; what followed is clear-ar
engagement-yes, between unseen lovers
and cousins.
l was dying" to fold her to my heart
but my souls condition ard maturing ap
pointments postponed that indefinitely.
What did you say? Why did she no
visit some of our friends at Centreville?
answer you cheerfully. She had her no
ions and would entertain them. Thougl
We were plighted, she declared it shoulC
not be said that she made the first visit
Many believe her right, / don't argu,
the point, but merely answer the question
Weeks passed. letters were numerous
and saccharine. The time arrived whel
could endure my single condition NJ
longer. What if some one were to Gu
me out at the eleventh hour? With sucl
love what would become of me? l wa
determined to own her even if / did no
see her for decade.
An idea dawned-a brilliant one.
was to compass speedy marriage, anC
satisfy her thirst for romance. After
flood of tenderness of dramatic prepare
tion, l wrote: "Kate, my adored one, lie
us depart from this stale routine and wee
by telegraph"
The idea took her by storm. Her an
swer was characteristic. 1t ran thus
Darling, will. The idea is savory
but is it legal ?"
Immediately / sent for my friend, tn
Judge Soon as he faced me, said /
Judge, is marriage by telegraph
legalS"
Certainly, sir, / see no objection to
contract by telegraph. l readily see hoy
all those requirements can be accom-
plished"
"Will you state this opinion on pape
and describe a formula for an electri
wedding9"
with pleasure, SIR"
The judge understood me and gladl,
complied, The result was forwarded i
Kate by return mail, and soon receive,
word that on the following Thursda,
she and the proper authorit'
would present themselves at the IndianaI
oils office, according to formula there t
enter the holy state of matrimony.
tell you the appointed day was grea
one among the mutual friends at each en-
of the wire. The affair was so novel tina
all else was eclinsed by the coniemnlatio