The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1873-08-05
NUMBER "a.
Seuse and ,Nopseuse,


A standing drink Whisky straight.
Moral instruments-Upr pianos.
The noisiest body Of Water--A
sound. sss - ..='-s.s
How to keep up in the world--Nevl
er get down.
Impecunious animals-Those who
haven't a scent.
Woman should study ts be smartj
but never shrew-ed.
a mai, cannot see the point q 4 joke
when be Is tie butt
Uncle Sans salute fo Capt. 1aoi
"You be hanged r
Two queer creatures to manage
Mules and mulattoes.
The man that "sticks' to his bus'-
ness-The drummer.
The best sewing. machine attachment
The engagement of q pretty seaiii-s
stress.
Tin has gone up, and the can makers
all over the county are getting cantank.
ers.
Our present relations with Turkey
will probably not be changed until next
Thanksgiving.
The papers have good deal to say
about "railro ad security" but where
can you find taemf -
How to kill Old Time-Take him by
the forelock, and, as he has; no other,
you've got him sure.
An Irish writer says, 81, know of no
earthly reason why women should not
become medical men,"
The ladies do their hair up so high
now that they have to stand on some
thing to put on their hats.
The Japanese have decided to call six
days of their new week Light, Moon;
Fire, Water, Metal, and Earth.
The best way to muzzle dog is to
press the muzzle close against the left
ear--then pull the trigger,
"The glory of woman is in her hair"
but it is desirable that she refrain from
shaking it over the cook stove.
II. you have got any secrets you can
now tell them to your wife. She viii
keep shady. af b. Sslsf
The best thing in this world is to
take things as they come--take them
easy-and take good many of them.
| A Florida paper has ascertained that
healthy alligator can eat seven negro
children inside of seven hOurs and not
display any symptoms of disquiet.
/ "What is given to the poor is laid up
in heayen.n This is undoubtedly the
reason so few give to the poorl-they
never expect 10 see it again.
i What cord is that which is full of
knots, which no one can unite, and in
which no one can tie another? A cord
of wood.
| Don't fret while the weathsr's sd
warm, or you'll get all freckled and
| ugly. Besides, what's the use of re-
pining2
| Cheerfulness and serenity of mind.
regular hours, and prudence in food and
clothing; are the surest preventives Of
| disease.
/ That farmer understood human ms;
d ture who said: "1f you want your boy
to stay at home don't bear too hard on
the grind stone when he turns the
crank" gl5 s
i A country postmaster in Virginia
G wishes that people who use postal cards
, wouldn't write so fine, as he consumes
twenty minutes in reading some of
! them
4 Wisconsin has more towns with ssn''
in the name than any other State in the
Union: and some of them are as hard
to pronounce as any of the rivers id
Maine.
e A young married man does not be.
> lieve "a thing of beauty is joy foret-
err He says the author of that senti
= ment ought to see his pretty wife when
: she's "got her dander up.'' 5.
The Devils pickets' is the new name
s given to youngsmen who are accdstum
/ ed to congregate around church tloorl
on Sabbath evenings and stare ut every
8 passer-by. &C.,
IS There are but three ways of liviiig :,
If by working, by begging, or by stealing.
l. Those who do not work, disguise it III
o whatever pretty language we please, are
doing one or the other two things.
. A Western editor insists that he wrote
:, - the word 'strousseau'' plain as pike,
=" staff in connection with certain bridal
presents. The printer however yulgarlj
put it 'struusers.'
!. When lady gets letter or ifasa,
zine she carries it in her hand, but
is couple of pounds of steak or a loaf b
q bread she manages to squeeze into he
!. pocket.
We respectfully suggest to the youns
v men about town who seem to take suel
delight in having their hair short, to
le get married and have it pulled out d.
once.
II A neat, clean, fresh-aired, sweet; t;cheef
le full, wellarranged house, exerts a mora
influence over its inmates, and make
the members of family peaceful an,
!" considerate of each others feelings an
:, happiness.
a, A sure way to make enemies is Il
n trust some men, and endeavor to col
20 lect their bills. The less disposition
" they have to pay the meaner man the,
y will think you are. No rogue eve
, cheats another who does not becom
, the mortal enemy of the one he ha
y wronged.
5, A sentimental youth swallowed th
e postage.stamp Oh letter from cher
le because he thought the dear girl ha
a licked it. 1t made him deaihly sick =
The reason was, that her big brother
who chewed tobacco, had put the stam
p on the letter.
ia A Meadville, Pa, girl, who WAS look
e ing at circus clown whrling hat wit
e a stick, re marked to her young ma
that she fused to do that" The youn
man W as looking at contor,ionist i
anoth er part of the arena who hal hi