Richland beacon. [volume] (Rayville, La.) 1869-1890, 1873-03-29
GENERAL ITEMS.
nv nick of time-Wrinkles.

The nick of time-Wrinkles.
VOICE of the night-S'cat.
DrrrIEs are ours, events are GODS.
The real yellow fever-Greed for gold.
NOTHING is so hard but search will find
it out.
SOMETHING that doesn't mind pinching
Snuff.
SOCIETY makes kings or beggars, but |
nature makes men.
THE eight wealthiest men in New Or |
leans are retired butchers.
TWENTY thousand strangers have visit
cd Florida thus far this season.
IT is said that iron can be made cheaper
in Tennessee than i'm Pennsylvania.
Glove is an eternal transport The
same might be said of canal boats.
IT is estimated that Kansas will add
$1,000 to her population this year.
FLORIDA has only 400 Indians left, and
isn't particular about keeping those.
PEOPLE who are always wishing for
something new should try neuralgia.
"GREAT is bankruptcy" says Carlyle:
sit brings an end to all shams under the
SUM-"
PRENTICE said thai Daniel was the only
man ever lionized without growing vain
about il.
CAN civil engineer inform us how it
is that the mouths of rivers are larger than
their heads?
WHY is a philanthropist like an old
horse?-Because he always stops at the
sound of woe.
TWENTY-FIVE persons were burned du-
ring 1872, in the city of Brooklyn, by the
use of bad kerosene oil.
You need not tell all the truth unless to
fh0Sn have nh 70 oil
But let all you tell be true.
The man who attempted to whistle a
bar of soap has injured his voice by trying
to sing stave OF a mOlasses cask.
The tale bearer and the tale-hearer
should be both hanged up, back to back,
enc by the tongue and the other by the
ear.
AN editor triumphantly exclaims, sMan
shall not live by bread alone" and then
acknowledges the receipt of a jug of sold
Bourbon"
SIR. woman's preaching is like dog
standing on his hinder legs. 1t is not
done well, but you wonder to see it done
at all.-Johnson.
CALIFORNIA housewives describe soda
as 'that ere stuff which yon put in bis
cults to make 'em get up and Grecian
bend themselves"
JOSH BILLINGS says: Yu kant find con-
tentment laid down on the map; it liz an
imaginary place not settled yet; and those
reach it soonest who throw away their
compass and go it blind.
FROM record of the fall of snow, kept
by gentleman who resides in Benton,
Mich, and measured after every snow
fall, the total fall of snow on level thus
far, is not less than ten feet.
NEARLY all the officers of Victor Eman-
uel's household are furnished with Amer
lean wives. A heavy tariff should be
placed upon such expectations, as the
women are needed out West"
"JAMEs," said young wife to her hus-
band a few days after marriage, ''you
were honest enough to tell me that the
chimney smoked, but why didn't you tell
me that you smoked yourself?"
A PHYSICIAN of Jacksonville, ILL.,, says
that he has learned by actual and repeated
experiments that electricity, properly ap-
piled, will effect cure in cases of cerebrO-
spinal meningitis or spotted fever.
THE boy that recommended few drops
of panegyric on sugar for the child of dis
quietude has his match in another who,
after successfully spelling 'chicanery,"
defined it to be a Large coop to raise
Chickens
vanished dead, who trod the earth that
now we tread?' If we were to make a
random guess, we should say the most OF
them are buried-though this may not be
the right answer.
NOTHING makes a shy man feel more
shy than an overdone cordially. Peo-
pies manner should show their kind feel
ing, but not puzzle you how to make a
return. A eulOgium by manner is
almost as embarrassing as eulogium by
words.
IHAvE known vast quantity of non.
sense talked about bad men not looking
you in the face. Don't trust that conven-
tional idea. Dishonesty will stare hon.
week. if there is anything to be got by
The aged but astute Illinois farmer
keeps no barometer, nor does he put his
trust in the grounding, but he knows
when spring approaches, by seeing his
sons who have arrived at manhood, pre-
pare to leave home, after winter Of
''sponging'' on the old man.
The days of superstition are not YET
over. In the Pennsylvania House of Rep.
resentatives, the other day, board Of
thirteen were objected to because it was
an "unlucky number" 1t was changed
W clcVcus 1uc Olu OTlSlu6l tillIUccI
States" were pretty good start for the
Republic, Notwithstanding the Oddity Of
the number.
The corporate bodies and citizens o.
Philadelphia have already contributed
upward of two million dollars toward tn,
Centennial Exhibition to be held in tina
city in 1876. Congress is expected Il
vote an appropriation, and all the State
will contribute. 1t may be interesting Il
mention that the expenses of the Vienn,
Exhibition are estimated at seven million
dollars.
A MORE or less worthy Scotch wife wa!
demonstrated with by her minister for he
habit of beating her husband. She ex
planned that her husbands conduct wa
not all that 1t ought to be. The minister
recommending Kindness and forgiveness
enjoined her no more to use her fists an,
nails, but to "heap Goals of fire upon hi
head" "Weel minister" replied tn
now enlightened wife, since you say sac
III try the Goals, but may tell We tina
twa or three kettles o. boiling water ha
wr0cht nae Improvement"
SOME of the most distinguished clergy
men and scholars Of New. Y Ork have form
ed an organization known as the Orients
Typographical Corps, the object of whicl
is to "gain . more extensive knowledg
of the places mentioned in Bible history.
The chief field of operations of the corp
will be the valleys of the Nile, Tgris, an
Euphrates, and other Biblical places il
Africa, Arabia, and Asia Minor; and the,
are on the point of dispatching an expe
dition to the Holy Land. The corps is
business organization, with a capital o
five hundred thoueapd dollara