davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
WitticiSmS of the Danbury Man

AN Englishman who is visiting in
Danbury says he has but poor idea
of the freedom of a country that has
to get its weather from the govern
| ment.
"THAr delight which knows no
bounds" has finally been discovered.
It's an Essex street boys ball, which
he rescued from the creek, Saturday.
and threw in vain against the side
walk.
The shrewish wife of Monsoon street
man, while at the breakfast table, Sun
day morning, lost her temper over
some triae, aud declared in heat that
he was hog. 80 L am" he meekly
confessed--" by marriage"
A DANBURY carpenter who has been
reading about the great National Park
to be established IN the Yellowstone
country, recently sent an application
to Washington for the job of making
the little boards which notify people
to keep off the grass. We like to see
promptness.
AN elderly gentleman named Pink
ney, living in Redding Ridge, we be-
lieve, while going to the depot in Dan
bury, last evening, stepped on peach
pit in front OF the post office, and sal
down on the pave ment with shocking
violence. Several people ran to his
aid, and one of them asked him if he
had hurt his spine. Heaven only
knows" feebly gasped tho sufferer
"Look in my hat and see."
DON'T he afraid of having little fun
in the family. A merry disposition is
god-send to home. There's the
case of Il man on Nelson street, for in.
stance. Saturday he went into the
kitchen ahead of his wife, and, seeing
two hucklebelry pies steaming on the
table, hastily concealed them in the
ice chest, which stood open in the back
hall. Then he went down tc WI chuck
ling to himself, and ten minutes later
the ice cart drove up and the ice man
brought in u tifty.ponnd cake and
started for the ice-chest, followed
closely by the fond wife expiating upon
the "m,lss." He put the cake upon
the edge Of the chest, and gave it
push over, and when it came down on
those two steaming pies n huckleberry
geyscr followed, and the ice man, with
eyes and face full OF tho discharge,
tlmblod completely over the woman,
and disappeared ont OF the door. The
wife recovered her balance rs speedily
as possible, and, catching up a broom,
went after the ice man, but he escaped
her; then she came buck and looked in
the e.chest, aud down ut the oil. cloth
and up at the ceiling, and around Oh
the walls. The men ut the store, who
were let into the joke 10y tho facetious
Nelson street man, are anxiously WON
dering how it turned out.
AT the Scientists Convention, in Port.
land, IL paper Was read the other day On
"Calvert's Supposed Relic Of Man in tho
MiOccno Of Tho Ulfu;lneIlusN While it
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

SOMETHING THAT TAKEs.-The three.
fold combination agency for selling =" Wealth
and Wonders Of The Boundless Wfst." There
is much sure money in it. See advertisement.
-Cono
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

Book AGENTS can overcome the Oh
staclc Of hard times on the new and liberal
syst. m adopted by E. HannafOrd & Co. SEQ
INSTRUMENTATION
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

ABsrNrHE drinking is becoming alarms
ingly popular in Newport Men IRE con-
tinually drinking it to their absinthe
wives.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
THE HOUSEHOLD PANACEA.
FAMILY LININIENT

Is the best remedy In the world for the folio wing
complaints. viz: Cramps in tho Limbs and Stomach,
Pain tn the Stomach, Bowels Side. Rheumatism in
all its FERNS, Bilious Colo, Neuralgis, Cholera, Dys
enteEy. Colds, Flesh Wounds. Burns, Sore Throat.
Spinal Complaints, sprains and Bruises Chills and
Fever. For Internal and External use
Its operation Is not only to relieve tho patient but
entirely tho cause Of tho complaint It peu
trates cpd pervades tho whole system. restoring
healthy tction to al its parts, and quickenng tho
blood.
The HoUsEHoID PANACEA Is PURELY VEGETABLE
aud All Healing.
Prepared By CURTIS L BROWN,
No. 2l5 Fulton Street, New York.
For ss1s by all Druggists
If you have Fever and Aeue. try sballenberse,'.
Antidote. You will then know OF ONE remedy that
never fails. The cure il Immediate.
CHOLERA. CRAMPS. DIARRHRA. and all Bowel Com
plants. arc speedily cured by DR.. Jsynes Carmina-
tive Bslsa. 1t takes away all soreness Of tho abdo
fhoat afr nd TIA u.tr,
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
Eating When Exhausted.

When the strength or nerve power is
already worn out or used up, the d.
gestion of food only makes fresh de-
mand upon it, and if it be unable to
meet the demand, the food is only q
burden upon it, producing miscl 10.
Our bodies have been compare d to
steam engines, the food being the fuel
and steam produced being the nerve
power. The analogy holds good to a
certain extent. Ii, when the steam is
low, because the fire is low. you pitch
in too fast quantity of coal, you put
out your fire, and if you have depended
upon steam power to fan your fires,
that is also extinguished. Beyond this
the comparison fails. You may clean
out your furnaces and begin again, but
in the body the consequences of this
overlooking are dangerous and often ia
tai. No cause of cholera is more common
than eaten freely when exhausted. The
rule should be to rest for a time. and
take some simple refreshment, a cup
or part of a cup of tea, little broth,
or even piece of bread !: anything
simple and in small amount, just to
stimulate the stomach slightly and be.
gin to restore its power. After rest, q
moderate quantity will be refreshing.
Never eat full meal when You are ex-
hausted. Take first small quantity
Of anything simple which may he
handy, and rest. Then, after a time,
proper food will be blessing, not a
burden. The fires will burn, the steam
will be up, and you con go on your way
safely. It is not amiss, IN this connec-
ton, to say that children would avoid
many fever,sh night and many an
attack of disease, if mothers would fol-
low this rule.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

Dr. j. walkers CALIFORNIA VIM
egar Bifters arc a purely Vegetable
preparation, made chiefly from the ma
tive herbs found on tho lower ranges OF
the Sierra Nevada mountains of Califor-
mia, tic medicinal properties of which
re extracted thcrcfiom without tho use
IF Alcohol. Tho question is almost
daily asked. "What is the cause of the
unparalleled success Of VINEGAR BIT
rERs?" Our answer is, that they remove
the cause of disease, and the patient re-
covers his health. They arc the great
blood purifier and q e-giving principle,
u perfect Renovation and lnvigorator
Of the system. Never before in tie
history Of the world has medicine been
compounded possessing the remarkable
qualities Of VINEGAR BITTERs in healing the
sick Of every disease man is heir to. They
are gentle Purgativc as we'll as Tonic,
relieving Congestion or Inflammation Of
tho Liver and Visceral Organs, il Bilious
Diseases.
Tho properties of JR. WALKER's
VINEGAR BITrERs are Apericnt, Diaphoretic,
Carminative, Nutritious, Laxative, Diuretic,
Sedatiye, Counter Irritant, Sudorific, Alter&
| tive. Gnd Anti Bilious.
Il. II. MCDONALD Il CO..
Druggists and Gen. Agts., San Francisco California
and COZ: Of Washington and Charlton Sts., n. Y.
Sold by all Druggists and Dealers.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
Water Filters.

In view of the fact that the water we
drink is likely to be crowded with
dangerous germs, it seems to be the part
of wisdom to adopt the simple precau-
ton suggested IN our heading. A
portable filter may be made of common
stoneware or earthen jar. The bottom
egg, or is covered with perforated slate
slab, leaving space to hold a supply OF
filtered water. A faucet is fitted into a
hole bored through the side of the jar,
as near the bottom as may be. On the
slab or stone is placed layer OF coarse
gravel clearly washed over that q
layer of clean washed sand; then q
layer of powdered charcoal, also we'll
washed; still another layer of sand,
and then one of coarse gravel, both
washed and perfectly clean. TIE re-
mainder of the space is for water. A
cover or wet cloth placed over the TOP
excludes dust. If porous jar is used,
the evaporation from the outside dur.
ing the hot weather will keep the con.
tents almost ice cold, particularly if II
be kept in current of air. The same
filtering arrangement may be applied
to cistern. At the upper corner is
the chamber into which the pipe dis.
charges. The layers of material are
gravel, sand and charcoal. As the filtel
will need to be taken out occasionally,
to wash the contents, it IS we'll to make
the chamber quite distinct, so that
access may be had to it at any time
without disturbing the cistern or itt
!
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

USE PRUss1Na's CELEBRATED CIDER
VINEGAR Warranted to keep pickles. Take no
OLher.-COm.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

AT the Scientists Convention, in Port.
land, Il paper Was read the other day On
"Calvert's Supposed Relic Of Man in tho
Mioccne Of tho D;lrdAneilts." While it
Was being read, you could have heard u
man dr"pa postage stump. Most Of the
members were asleep.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
A Patriotic Judge.

A good story is told Of Judge of the
Municipal Court, at Rutland, Vermont.
During the recent military reunion in
that city, IL young man was arrested for
drunkenness The Judge squinted be-
nignantly through his spectacles, and
said: You got drunk, didn't you Z"
" Yes, sir, I confess I did" "Well,
you came here to celebrate, l suppose
-you are one OF the soldiers, are yOu
not?" Eyes, your honor, but I claim
nothing on that account" swell,
sir, law or no law, I fell more like
thanking you for what you once did
than finding you for what you have
now done, and SO you may go.
PRIDE and poverty have travelled
together now for about five thousand
years. and pretend to Inv each other,
but they kant phool ennybody but
themselves.
TIE Massachusetts brewers are brow
ing nothing now hut mischief. This is
one Of the effects Of the probibitory law.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
mana9cmcnt CT se,t,n. faens

We have hen just off, that we set
on fifteen White Leghorn eggs, that
has Matched fourteen chicks. After
setting her we did not disturb her ct
all-let her have her own way-in fact
did not go near her, only to place
water and feed within her reach, and
on the twenty-second day, on going to
the coop, we found her of. with four
teen as lively chicks by her side as one
could wish to see.
We think we have learned a lesson
from this, !. e., after hens are properly
set, to let them alone, and not disturb
them even to sprinkle their eggs-let
nature have her course, as near as may
be in the matter, and the chicks will be
all the better for it-for in meddling
with the hen, or eggs, during the
process of Incubation, we are too apt
to overdo the thing, and hence our ILL.,
success.
We do not agree with the editor of
the Chronicle when he says chen
should never be allowed to he off her
eggs more than quarter of an hour at
time" This theory is all nonsense,
and of course no one familiar with the
management of fowls would think of
setting them where the SCOUTING east
winds" could ever. reach them. If the
setting hen has hel nest in an Enclosure
with q small runway attached, with
ash-heap or dust bath at hand, when
she comes off she never should be dis.
turbed, but 1T remain off as long as
she sees fit. An observing person can
easily tell if she intends leaving her
nest in that case it's we'll enough
and proper to catch her and shut her
on-not otherwise.
We have hens that have been off
their nests for two or three hours 1T q
time, and have caused no bad results,
but On the contrary we believe such
absence has had decidedly beneficial
influence on the eggs, by giving then,
an airing. Too close setting is detri.
mental to the chicks, making them
weak and puny, liable to all kinds OF
diseases. Experience is good teacher,
and this We have learned by our exper-
iments for the past twenty or thirty
years.-Mc american Ra1r0l Home.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

Let US hoe thoroughly all the season
until the crops are perfected, and while
engaged in the work observe and discuss
the benefits We may derive from It,
~ H. Farmer.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
RAILWAYS READY RELIEF
WILL AFFORD INSTANT EASE.
FEVER AND AcUE.

FEVER AND AGUE cured for fifty cents. There
Il not remedial agent in this world that viii cuf0
Fever and Ae1e ard al other M.larioos, Bilious
Scarlet, Typhod Yellow, and other Fevers fsided b.
READY RELIEF. Fifty Cents Der B0ttle.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

We see by the Chicago papers that
their lons-cstablished and popular brand MOT
tiled GERMAN SOAP its present price and SUI
pcrlor quality makes it the cheapest as well as
the best soap for cOnSumerS.-COm.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
Kidney and BLADDER oomplaints,

Kidney and BLADDER Complaints,
Urinary and Womb disea<es, Gravel, Diabetes
Dropsy. Stopraee Of .ter, Inccptirencc Of Us1nc
Rriehts Disease. Abu minuris, aud In all cases vhe
cloudy mixed with suhstances like the white o. D
egg, or threads like white silk or there is morbid
uarn. Dlhous appeara noe. and white bone. dust de
Eosits, and when there is prckine. burning sensa
lion when passing water and pain IN the small Of tn,
Back, and along tho Loins.
Tusnor Of l2 Ycnrs' Growth Cured by Rad.
ways ResoDvent.
PRICE $500 PER BOTTLR.!
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11

E. HANNAFoRD & Co., subscription
book publishers, have matured plan of sell.
ing books that enables their agents to coin
money. Sec INSTRUMENTATION.
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
Z. &. e,
RAILWAYS READY
e ELIEF
Cures the Worst Pains
ONE TO TWENTY MINUTES,
NOT ONE HOUR
AFTER READING THIS ADvER11sEMENT
16eel any one Suffer with Pain.
Railways Ready Relief 10 . Curo fes
Every Pain.


Railways Ready Relief 10 . Curo fes
Every Pals.
TWAS THE FIRST AND II
THE ONLY PAIN RE N EDV
that instantly stops the most exeruciatins pains
allays Inammations. and cures COMPOSITIONS whether
Of the Lungs, Stomach, Bowels, or other glands OF
organs, by one application.
IN FROM ONE TO TWENTY MINUTES,
no matter how violent and excrucialns the pain the
RHEUMATIC, Bed-ridden, Infrm, Crippled. Nerv.
GUS, Neuralgia, or Frustrated with disease MAJ
suffer,
RAILWAYS READY RELIEF
WILL AFFORD INSTANT EASE,
Inflammation Of the Kidneys,
Inflammation Of tie Tewe!:.
Sore Throat, Dinsc9!t Rresasis., .,-u
''s"ter'e"' cr'"p' "''tsfi!: .;::-,, ,,.,.,-.'
Headache, Tosthache,
Cold ch,,,.. A..e cs Nsf;i:."'s'"' Rse"~''''.
Tho application Of the READY RELIEF to The
Sor6 Or nd ne pam OF deo exists ""
twenty drops IN h.if tumbler Of water will in .
few moments cure Cramps. Sp.sms. Sour Stomach
Collie, Wind in the Bovels and iii Internal fsins.
:Tf; sS ,s.s so ts :. s!ep
SS s:s
~ stimulant
Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-09-11
PREPARED BIZ
DR.. J. e. AVER & CO., Lowell, Mas.,
NEW YORK,

- DSYCHOMANCY, OR SOUL CHARMING ~
and affections Of anv person they choose Instantly
This simple mental requirement all can possess, FREQ
tiaa Oracle. Dreams. Hints to Ladies'. queer book
Pioche daily record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1872-1876, 1873-12-19
A CLERGYMAN ON GAMBLERS

Rev. J. ]. Laifvrty, on the occasion of
his recent visit to the White Sulpher
Springs, in Virginia, was assigned quar-
ters within ear-shot of and near the lair
of the "tiger." He gave to the public a
very interesting account of his exper-
fence and impressions will hardly fail to
be appreciated by all. 1t will, at any
rate, produce a smile in some quarters.
The reverend gentleman says;
deals the gentle faro be unsung? Shall
his solacing suppers find no muse? Not
while Fabers are only ten cents-three
for quarter He who thinks my rest
was broken by the loud cries of the
"Sons of Belial," or that was jostled
by the staggering drunkard on his way
to the game Of chance, or curses or
clamor for pelf at my door, is erring far
in his thoughts. The step of the gam
boiler is as soft as the foot on Turkey
carpets. His bow is slight incline
and q benignant smile. He speaks but
few words, and in mild, musical voice.
There comes from the bank a sub
dued murmur like the hum of bees or
the rattle of the rose leaves. The cards
slide from the pack with smooth, oily,
noisless motion no rafting or flap
ping. The bet is made in low, ten.
der tone. A lucky play or bad choice
ELECTS no comments. The player re.
joices in secret, or chafes in voiceless woe
The tiger" is always serene. His fur
is rs soft as silk, and his paw is velvet
His eye is set far back in the socket, apd
is as lusterless as light -house lamp in
midday--or, rather, Leyden jar full Of
latent lightning. He deals out the des
tiny of dollars as unmoved as fate. HI
never intrudes. He solicits neither youl
notice, conversation, nor companionship
He is easy, modest, fearless and a civil
lied Thug. His Derrnger is freshl,
oiled and capped every day. 1t is Away,
hid. but handy. He will pull trigge
only when there shalt n second to spare
II you play, it seems to give him n,
pleasure, if you pass his door withou
turning your eye, his smiles is as swee
as ever If you ask favor, it is granite,
promptly and gracefully. He respect
the Sabbath, attends service, listens witt
serious attention, never for a momen
allows his eye to admire his own doe
skin and diamonds or inspect the cloth
ing Of others.
Pioche daily record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1872-1876, 1873-12-19

attention to defalcations in the accounts
# General o. o. Howard. .of the Freed
mans Bureau, and at the request OF
Wood, the letter was read.
Wood offered resolution that the let
ter and accompanying reports relating to
the defalcation be referred to the Com
mittee on Military Affairs, with instruc-
tons to report resolution providing for
trial by military court martial of any
officers of the army implicated therein.
Dawes moved to amend by striking
out the clause relating to instruction.
Wood said he preferred. in view Of the
antecedent history OF the Freedman s
Bureau and of General Howard's con-
nection Herewith, there should be some
instructions given.
Dawes amendment was agreed to
ia to So. .
After argument between Wood and
Dawes, the resolution was amended by
inserting the word "alleged" before
''defalcation, and striking out ''instruc-
tons, y" and adopted.
The House then, at 80, resumed con-
sideration of the salaries question, and
the bill as reported by the majority was
| recommltted, with the INSTRUCTIONS oHereo
by Orth last evening.
The House then resolved itself into q
Committee Of the Whole, and proceeded
to the consideration of the bill making
an appropriation to meet the extraordi
nary emergencies in the Navy Depart
ment. The bill provided as follows: Fol
the pay of the Navy. $500, 900; for con
tiugent expenses. S25, 900; for the Bureau
of Navigation, $4,000; for the Bureau
of Ordinance, 100000; for equipmen
and recruiting. $780, 900; for the Burea,
of Yards and Docks, 500, 600; for the Blu
reau of Provisions and Clothing, $500,
600; for the Bureau of Steam engineer
ing. 1886, 900; for the Bureau Of Con
struction and Repairs. $500, 900. Total
2,9S0000.
Pioche daily record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1872-1876, 1873-12-19

Newark silver Mining Company
Location Of works, Ely District, Lincoln county,
Nevada.-Notice is hereby given that at meet.
ing Of the Board of Trustees OF said Company.
held on the first day Of December, 1873, an as
sessment, mo. 81 Of One Dollar and Fifty Cents
per share was levied upon the capital stock Of
said Company. payable Immediately. In United
States gold COIN to the Secretary at the once Of
the Company, Room No. 1, No. 401 California
street, San Francisco, California.
Any stock upon which said assessment shall
remain unpaid on Thursdey, the sth day
Of January, 1874, shall be deemed delin-
quent and will be duly advertised for sale at pub
lie auction; and unless payment shall be made
before, will be sold on Wednesday, the 4th
day Of February, 1877 Z, TO pay the delinquent
assessment, together with costs Of advertising
and expenses Of sale.
DAVID T. BAGL.EY, Secretary.
oface-Room No. !. No. t0l Californis street
San Francisco, California tsr d9-td
Pioche daily record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1872-1876, 1873-12-19

SrrMuIANTs.-The habituai tea-drinker
finds this fragrant herb TO be very
pleasant stimulant. The unpleasant
symptoms which tea-poisoning produces
in 9 patient not Injured by hapit disaP-
pear in the seasoned tea-drinker, leaving
only a certain exhiliration which appears
to be perfectly innoeuons. III Tea Is
safe stimulant, il is certainly an hgreta,
bic one, and there seems 10 DE no Naiio
reason why brain-workers should refuse
themselves the solace. Coffee is equai-
~ good. French people lind in conee
the most efficacious remedy for the tenn
porary torpor Of the mind which results
from the processes of digestion. Balsac
drank great quantities of coffee whilst he
wrote; and this, it is believed, brought
on the terrible nervous disease that ac-
celerat,d his end. The best proof that
tea and coffee are favorable to intelleetu-
al expression is that all nations use one
or the other as aids to conversation. In
Arabia, there is never any talk without
the inevitable coffee. that fragrant Ara
bian berry prepared with such delicate
cunning that it yields the perfect aroma.
The wisdom of occasionally usinS these
various stimulants for intellectual purpo-
SEES is proved by single consideration.
Each Of us have little cieverness and a
great deal of sluggish stupidity. There
| are certain occasions when we absolutely
need the little cleyerness that We possess.
The orator needs it when he speaks, the
poet when he yersifes, but neither cares
how stupid he may become when tho
Grafton is delivered, and the lyric set
down on paper. The stimulant serves to
bring out the talent when 1t is wanted,
like the wind in the pipes OF an organ.