South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1873-08-08
T b O m as 81 IN m b / g i.
HOW He GOT MARRIED.

Blumble boosted of being q confirmed
bachelor, aud took pride in being called
woman hater. l mean Thomas Blumble
of the importing aud jobbing house of
Hood, Silver & Blumble.' He was very
fond of letting people know that he disre-
gsrded the charms of the softer sex, and
was frequently heard to say that he would
like to see the woman that could get him
under her thumb. There was q time, of
course, when Humble was susceptible to
the overtures of Cupid because when he
was plain Tom of fifteen years of age, and
left Rock Cove came to the city and en-.
tered the employ of 'Meusor, Tigby & Hood
be left behind him u young Polly Aun,'
with many sigh and tear, and more vows
than both put together, to be true till
death. For two years he wrote constantly
to his Polly Aun, repeating the manifold
VOWS of boysh love then he was promoted
from boy TO entry clerk, and soon after was
introduced TO a very bewitching young la
day, whom we may be allowed to call
Hattie Elton. Then he forgot his Polly
Ann down in Rock Cove, and became We
~ attentive to Miss Elton no accompsn-
led her to the theatre and made her pres
ents he got trusted for his new coat, and
with the money that he should have paid
Tor 1t, they TOOK sleigh-ride to Brighton,
and feasted on hot chickens and cham.
pague to please her he learned to polka
and waltz the schottische sud varsovieune
were not in vogue then. Things had sped
along very smoothly for about a year /; so
Tom thinking he might as we'll have the
matter settled at once, popped the ques.
ton. Miss Elton appeared very much sur.
prIsed ) for moment she remained silent,
then lifting up both hands, she exclaimed {:
why, Mr. umble'-she had constant
~ called him Tom for six months previous
I've been engaged these two years
did't you know it?
know it? No replied Blumblc in ut
ter astonishment.
'Why, yes, I've been engaged to Charlie
Dudly for long while, and | thought you
knew ali about it, and were ouly paying at
tention to me out Of poliieness Charlie is
in New York now, but we are to be mar
ricd next Christmas
Married next
We may guess what Blumble was about
to say, but we shall always be in doubt,
for, instead of finishing his sentence, he
took his bat and rushed out Of the house,
not even waiting to maze the parting salu-
tation of good evening" Perhaps he was
afraid to trust his gnashing teeth, for fear
they would change his well meant words
into some wicked expression.
Tom, in the privacy of his own chamber
with his door locked, his elbows upon his
!ight-stand, and his face quite buried in
his hands, reverted to the years time and
the many dollars he had thrown away on
Miss Elton then he thought of poor Pol.
ly Ann, whom be had 'cut 90 shamefully,
down in Rock Cove, and be decided to
write to her, to offer pressing business as
an excuse for not having written before, to
sue for pardon for past negligence, aud to
assert that his affections were still unalter-
cd and unalterable So he unburied his
face, and pcnned the tender missivo full
of falsehonds and stale love, which he dis
patched with the fullest confidence that
Polly Am would be very happy to receive
It. But alas tor poor human expectations
Polly AIMS letter came. 1t was brief ;
she told BIumblo she had heard Of bis at
tcnions to the city lady, that she bad al.
most forgotten him, and was going to mar.
II,
the next week She returned to Tom his
earliest efforts in love-l9tter writing and
lock Of his hair, add requested him to re-
turn to her sundry articles in that lino
that he had received ftom her.
From that day Blumble announced him
self to the world az a woman hater. He had
been false to one woman, and one woman
had tricked him. So he cried down the
whole sex Tho time which Blumble bad
heretofore divided between love aud bust.
ness, was nov devoted to business e1clu-
sivcly, and IN consequence he received one
promotion after another until no had the
pleasure Of seeing his own name the third
on the Sign over the door, which he bad
entered as an errsnd boy I don't believe
he remembered that there was any such
person 10 tho world as Hattie Elton or
Polly Ann, the first day tho new sligo was
raised
1t was as the junior member Of the frtn
that Blumbls bad travelled through the
New Eng aud States two years ago last
tai with samples, receiving orders. Du-
ring bis tour he renamed in the pretty
village Of r.. ~ II one 6ne night 10 Oc-
tobCr. lie sat in the bsrroom after supper,
smoking Isis cigar, until it became filed
with The villagers, discussing politics, smo-
king their pipes, talking Of their crops and
ogling him all Of which was quite ubin-
terestlog 20 him, so be concluded 70 walk
cut and view the village by moonlight lie
had hardly stepped into the cntry, end oe-
fore he could close the door, ere he heard q
voice inquire: