Whig and tribune. [volume] (Jackson, Tenn.) 1870-1877, 1873-05-31
"ARCIIIE HUTCHINGTON.''
nj. views ON nIarrIasc.

| AKCHIE HUECHlNG1ON.S
HIS Views ON Marriage.
'TEaws-a-massy, soul sakesi when
| was young, twas different then
Why, when folks was a-going to get
married, they took time, and medi-
tated upon it, and kinder studied
each other out, and reflected and
considered; and when they did get
married they were married for sar-
tain, and very much married-mar-
ried from TOP to toe; and they ex-
pected to stay married; there warn't t
no talk OF your disYerces then; they
knew beforehand that they was to
'hev and to hold till grim death,
and they mostly usually did. But
now a young fellow sees a pretty
| gal, and asks her to marry him, just
as he'd ask her to take q walk; and
she's all ready-'yes, sir, and thank
/ yer, too, and they 60 and get mar
r1ed, with no more realizing sense
of their responsibility than Cock
Robin has when he twitters and
ehirps to Jenny Robin. Well, pret-
ty soon they 90 at it-Shc finds she
don't like tobacco-smoke, and he
don't like a wife that can't do q
thing bat fTizzle her hair; and so it
goes from bad 10 worse, until at last
they sue for s disvorce. And they'll
get it, tool And all for Whatl-
Whts Tor uncomfortability OF tenn
PEI! s5h. Law ss-a-ia IS -, Sofl sakps.
now, did YOU everl uncomfortable
ity Of temper!' oh, Lordyp'
"Ineompatibility of temper, Mr..
Hutchington," suggested.
EYes, l know it; uncomfortable
ty of tcmper-them's the words that
does it. Well, is not there alters
uncomfortability of temper in every
family, and alters has been, and al
lers will be? Only in the good old
times they used to screw it down
and keep it under; and so, you see,
they managed to get along without
none of yer disvorces.
fDon't yer suppose, sir, that there
was uncomfortability of temper e.
nough in Noah's ark, with ali them
odds and ends Of creation-crseters
that wasn't nowadays agreeable to
one another's feelings all messed in
together there?-dogs and cats,
sheep and wolves, foxes and geese,
chickens and weasels (and skunks,
I'll bet)-and mighty small stable
room accommodations, / tell you'll
How was it bout uncomfortability
of temper there, do you s'pose?-
Why, don't you see, they he'd to
'commodate all of um-tjest luff and
bear away as the sailors say, the
| lion, / 'spose he roared kinder soft
| like, so as not to skeer the turkle-
doves; and the hyenay, she did not
laugh out as loud as she wanted to,
1 dare say; the big bear, he kinder
shut up growing; and the kang'rOo
took care not to leap on other folk
ses toes; the horse was keerful not
to kick up his heels; and il the dog
felt as mad as fire, he didn't bite no.
body.
"That was the way they done it,
no doubt ont; stands to reason they
did cause, don't you see, sir, if they
/ had all on um given way to their un-
| comfortabilities of temper, and each
on um acted out their own onregen-
crate mater why in course they'd hev
] stove the bottom out of that thund-
ering old tub of his in less than no
time and she'd a'foundered, and
Iney u al gone 70 Inc DOIIOIn, aHu
+; wouldn't hev been no call for any
more wedding-rings, that's sartain:
and where you and l would be now,
its mighty hard thing to say.
'But, as was saying, they didn't;
( they behaved beautiful l don't see
how it was-seems it couldn't hev
been Noah's doings-fOr, between
you and 1, guess he wasn't much;
an unsteady, drinking man he alters
was, you know; wasn't he, sir? and
not used tOnavagating, by no means.
But viii say fort, he managed that
cruise remarkably welt, consider
ing what his cargo was, and that his
crew was half Women-kind; he sar-
tainly made a saving v'yage of it,
which was a, good deal, all things
considered.-HaTper''s Monthly.