The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-11-22

A FUNNY TEMPERANCE CASE. - In
Akron, o., heard of funny temper
ance case. A rumseller whom 1 will
call Hi Church, because he was high
most of the time, had been sued several
times for damage done by his rum on
citizens of the town. One man came
out drunk and smashed in big glass
window. He was too poor to pay for it,
and the owner came against Church.
A boy about sixteen got drunk and let
horse run away with him, breaking his
arm. His father made Church pay the
damages. A mechanic got drunk and
was killed on the railroad track, and his
wife sued Church for 81 900, and got it.
A farmer got drunk and was burned in
his barn on the hay. His son sued
Church and recovered. Church got
sick of paying out so much money fer
personal and property damages. 1t ate
up all the rumseller's profits. Still, he
acknowledged the law to be statute,
and that it made him responsible for all
the damage done by his rum. He used
to argue, also, that sometimes his rum
did people good, and then he said he
said he ought to receive something back.
One day Lawyer Thompson got to
drinking. Thompson was mean, like
most lawyers, and when he died of the
deliriuna h'emenS there wasn't much
mourning in Akron. There wasn't any.
body who cared enough for Thompson
to sue Church for damage done. So,
one day, Church went before the Court
himself.
"What does Mr.. Church want?" asked
the Justice
"Ill tell yer what, Jedge," commenc-
ed the rumseller, when my rum killed
that thar mechanic johnson and farmer
Mason, cum down like man. 1 paid
the damage and squared up like Chris
tian-now didn't L, Jedge?"
Eyes, you paid the damage, Mr..
Church, but what them"
wall, Jedge, my rum did good deal
lords KILN lawyer Thompson now, and
it pears ter me when / kill lawyer /
kinder oughter get rebait. Ell Per-
kins in the Graphic.
PETTY PoMPosITY.-I am led to be-
lieve that petty pomposity is one of the
most uncomfortable of the minor unpleas-
antnesses. The mildest case of this kind
which / can at this moment recall is, at
the same time, so obnoxious that, 1 re-
gret to say, 1 can hardly bring myself to
proper frame of mind for its calm dis
cussion. l think 1 must be peculiarly
sensitive to this style of social nuisance.
because so few of my friends fully SYM
pathize with my antipathy. Indeed,
there is so much diffidence in the man
ner of the pompous gentleman 1 have in
my mind-it is such a gentle tragedy
that there are many who do not perceive.
or else are not in the least discounted
by, the thing that irritates me so. Per
haps my own self-consciousnes helms
me to detect the same quality in others
and perhaps the manner to which I nj.
lude IS rather the outgrowth of large
self-consclousness than anything else.
1t may be this that affects the tone of his
voice and conversation, to whose mur-
murous common-places he seems to be
listening with a sweet content. He saws
thing, not in order to convey an idea
| (supposing him possessed of such an
anomaly, but that the air NAV be bur-
dened with the soft and measured tones
of his utterance, as with soothing
song, bringing delight to his own ears,
and, incidentally, to those of his audit
ors.. Thus his simplest question or re-
mark-as to the price of huckleberries
or the imminence of rain-has cadence
all its own. The thing that maddens
me IS that this fellow of no accomplish
ment arrogates the subdued grandeur of
"a hero ; he thinks to wear that fine flow
er Of gentility which has its roots ONLY
in chivalrous life.-Scri6ner's.