River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1873-11-25
Wi and IInnnnr.

country in the world Because Its
capitol is always Dublin.
THE people of Mount Carmel, ILL.,,
expect TO get their food meat for re-
pentance by converting a church Intoa
market.
The Chinese have saving, that an
unlucky word dropped from the tongue
cannot he drawn back 10y coach and
SIX horses.
THERE are go, 600 orange trees on
the St. Johns River, in Florida. Each
tree Yields about so net income per.
season.
A WESTERN parson delicately began
funeral discourse by alluding to the
fact that be had officiated at the hang
/ ing of the deceased.
A MAN having his hair cut, was asked
by the garrulous operator how he
would have it done. "If possible"
replied the man. "in silence"
/ THERE is story that an accepted
lover, in certain county in Kentucky,
lately traded off his interest and good
will in his lady love to his rival for
few Berkshire hogs.
The other day, as a Portland black
smith was pairing horses hoof, pre-
paratorv 20 shoeing him, be found a
cent imbedded in the hoof and covered
I by the frog.
An. Jenny" said sympathizing
friend to one who was Just too late for
the train, ''you didn't run fast enough"
"Yes did, )" said Jenny; :" ran fast
enough, but l didn't start soon
enough.
PERHAPS it was not amusing to see
John, the other night, singing con-
tentedly to himself, and crumblng
bread into bowl of starch which his
wife had placed in the pantry, and say
ing that there was nothing lihe bread
and milk after all.
Two little girls were comparing pro-
gress III catechism study. | have
got to original sin, said one; How
far have YOU got2' "Me2 Oh, I'm
way beyond redemption" said the
, other.
: A Texas editor prints the following
' energetic opinion: 1.-The man who
/ would water petroleum and sell it,
1 would sneak into the palace of the
King of Kings and steal the gliding
from the wings OF angels.
"WHY," asked governess of her
little charge, g. do we pray God to give
us our daily bread Why don't we
ask for four days. or five days, or a
week." we want il fresh, replied
the ingenious child.
They have had sclopticon exhibit
ton at Lockport, ILL.,, and the Courier
says. Tho last picture was beauti.
full thing Ii was called Love Among
the Roses, and resembled cross child
Graded in crimson cabbage
A NEW item in the fashion of ladies',
dress was accidentally introduced in
one of the churches on Sunday. A
lady wearing an elab rate Elizdbethan
ruff-black silk. lined with sky-blue
satin-wore directly under the chin a
small paper, on which was marked the
price, $l25. The unconscious wearer,
! iin,id about setting the fashion, blush
ed at the discovery,
Rosr ELL once asked Johnson if there
was no possible circumstance under
which suicide would be iustifiable.
mo" said Johnson. Well" SAID
Boswell, "suppose man bad been
guilty of fraud, and that he was GER
tain TO be found out. " "Why, then, F"
was the reply, Sin that case let him go
20 some country where he is not known,
and not 10 the devil, where ne is well
known"
SAYS the Ohio State Journal "Not-
, withst8nding our fair warning, reck-
less individual brought chapter in
rhyme on the late Beautiful Snow to
this Office yesterday. After the exchange
mans Bogardus kicker aud buzz saw
, went through him there was lock 81
his hair left, which his friends can re.
cover by proving property and paying
for this advertisements. Ills hair was
red his 'pome wasn't
A HARTFORD bricklayerlet fall brick
from fourth story rpon the shoulder
Q of a man passing beneath. The man
5 paused moment, and then, with a
e voice trembling with emotion, shouted
' "Hil you dropped brick. The
s bricklayer, who was looking over the
edge Of the seaiiold to see If the brick
Q was damaged, cheerlully answered,
a "All right, you needn't mind bringing
F.. IL up
3 You hev heam gentlemen OF the
, Jury" said an eloquent advocate, ''you
{. hev heern the witness swar he saw the
. prisoner raise the gun you hev heen
9 him swar he saw the flash and heert
i the report you hev heern him swar b,
. saw the dog fall dead you hev heer
!. him swar he dug the bullet out will
i his iack-kniie, and you bey seen TN
4 bullet produced in court; but whar
!, gentleman, whar, ask you, Is the MAJ
!. who saw that bullet hit that dog
= ONE Of the wittiest as well as one o
y the most brilliant men Pennsylyanl
!. has produced, was the late George W
:, Barton, of philadelphia, who once o'
n cupied a seat on the bench. Trying
= case before a Judge who was chiefly :
markable for obtuseness, he TOOK occ'
al. sion TO say that he had often seen en-
es great ass in judicial robes. ?
Il speak from experience, ! supposII3'
as was the angry retort " Not at allI
ds replied Judge Barton; " am spe"
ing directly from observation