Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1873-01-17
CURRENT ITEMS.

WHAT is the most difficult ascentp Get
ting up a subscription.
THE next worse thing to raining pitch.
forks; Hailing omnibuses.
DANBURY has three men who can hold
q woman'sjaw They are dentists.
WHY are religious people fit subjects
for entomologistsi, Because, they are in.
sects. ~ -
A LITTLE Daubury girl told a visitor
that her grandmother chewed tobacco
with her nose.
A BosFos paper announces that the
Massachusetts Legislative debating so.
ciety" had gone home.
JOE CopuBN has secured position in
Brooklyn drug store, with a view to
poundingm1ace, probably.r1 A t-'--a
"EAsT'fNDfA shuffus nuts.p said to be
sure cure for dyspepsia, are q novelty
with metropolitan fruiterers. s3 ,eI
"SHE siBgs-her trillsthrough her nose,"
said an auditor at "a concert. "Yes,"
said his friend, they are nos.trils." -
A DANBURY youth carries one of his
girls teeth" as a. fond remembrancer.
When he is married he can have all her
jaw. ,,rSY 81. ,7t f@ v &s
A WoBURN, tAlass.) woman has called at
the postoftice twice day for twelve
years for letter that does not come.
THE curiosity Of a Maine lady was SO
great that she called on woman who
was down with the. smallpox 'just to see
how it looked"
THE orange crop of Louisiana is said
to be in bad condition. The fruit is
spoiled by q new disease which causes it
to turn black. a-l 1e
ENGLAND has built steel steamboat
ninety feetlong, and drawing only twelve
inches of5water, for one of the rivers of
Brazil. Hrcd, -f.i.-,ss
THE Masons have now taken hold of
the worSof completing the Washington
monument, and the funds begin to accu-
mulate with most encouraging rapidity.
EVERY woman thinks her husband the
worst in the world until she compares
notes with other women, when she comes
to the conclusion that hers is the best.
THE YOUNG EUPHEMsT. Aunt Mary
"What is meant by declining a noun,
Ethel ?" Ethel Politely refusing it,
aunt, deer,tnt ,,5 -.
A MAN with fifteen daughters and
twelve sons, is figuring as to whether it
will be cheaper to mix up an arsenic stew
or use kerosene for kindling-wood in his
THE Indians of the Skohowish (Ore-
gon) Reservation lately sent to the mills
two booms of logs containing $50, 900
feet" which they had cut and foated
out themselves.
A MAN in Leavenworth, while digging
a well, at the depth of twenty-five feet
struck a vein of coal. Three wagon-loads
were taken out and sold for twenty-three
cents per bushel.
The higher up we git the more we are
watched--therooster on the top ov the
church steeple is ov more importance,
altho' he is thin, than two roosters in a
barn-yard.Lgo1 Billings.
The Milwaukee Journal is in favor of
allowing boys to catch rides on sleighs,
and thinks'they might just as well die in
that waysas togrow mp and be killed in
railroad accidents. 49,.
A MIDLsND man, after gazing long and
attentively At the telegraph, amused BY
stander with the remark: "I've noticed
that thing often, an burned if shouldn't
like to see it work" y
The Shore Line Railroad is to have
new draw-bridge signals set 1900 feet
from the bridges, and so constructed that
when indicating danger they will, if un-
needed, knock the smoke stack from the
locomotive.
A PENNSYLVANIA man came upon a
drove of five deer a few days ago while
walking through the woods. He had a
hammer in his hand which he threw and
knocked one OF the deer down, then ran
up and captured it alive after slight
struggle.
A MAN in Danbury who enjoys the most
sympathy is he who chased runaway
team for half mile, and finally succeed
ed in heading it off only to find the driver
in the carriage, looking very much aston.
ished ats the hallooing and painting res
cuer(0
THE TitUsville Press says: "One of our
city confectioners wishes us to inform
his juvenilepatrons that he can not give
thirty days time on five cents worth OF
chewing gum, bat he will take first mort.
gage on skates and hand-sleds from par.
ties whose parents are on substantial
basis" d..
BECAUSE in the wedding procession OF
the Emperor of China there were two
black, two white, six yellow, six red, two
blue, aud two embroidered yellow um
brellas, the. New York Worlds absurd
punster concludes that his Majesty was
preparing for long reign.
THERE have been a large number OF
brilliant feminine victories in this city
during the past leap year, partly owing,
we suppose, to the existence of the "girls
matrimonial club" secret society al
whose meetings the members repeat the
pretty thingsthat have been said to them
and collect proofs for breach of promise
actions, Where the fact of young mans
saying the,same things to- different girls
shows thelabsence of1serious intentions
Sl)Ji310SfeLd Mines \ Re11lLbLfc1n
IF any. farmer should chance to have 6
COW fall into an ice hole in the river, ht
may learn how to get her out from this
story of how 10 was done at Bethel, Yer
mont, one day last week: A man caught
the unfortunate animal by the horns anC
held her head above water, while ropC
could be procured; then another man put
the rope around her neck with slip-kno
and tightened it around her throat, caus
ing her to suddenly bloat with air, anC
rise to the top of the water, when will
her struggling and o little assistance sht
came out 81 the icesatelya {
THE slant-eyed Chinaman can discount
the Yankees on ingenuity. What Yam
kee would ever have thought of protect
ing small birds, from their larger perse
cutors bytying whistle to their tails
Yet this plan has been in operation in thu
Flowery Kingdom for thousand years
Doves are numerous there, but they wert
so pIeyedsupon by the vultures, that til
whistle Wssplaced upon the tails of man,
of them which makes a shrieking nois'
when the, bird passes through the air, anC
the VultaFes are frightened by this
A New PIAcEi or DEPosIT.-A few
days sine6s a ai-shop- keeper in this cit
pulled odtilis money drawer farther thai
usual, ana A9ticed a dollar bill hanging
over thebaek ofsthe drawer. This Lee
him to investigate and belinda partition
was found between sixty and seVent,
dollars worth OF bills and scrip, most O
which had been badly mutilated by mice
Among the money was a $50 bill on
State bank; issued before the bank adopt
ed the national system. m.-Neso Bedf0r.
Msrcuryss2"''1''it3 ,A90riuI sf