davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
PHUNNYGRAMS.

Joint Acknowledgements
A Criminal Court-Sparking another
mans wife
A correspondent wants to know il
beef 4 Ia mode is prepared from Modocs.-
Danbury Ne'cs.
The are enough useless fruit cans and
hoop-skirts on Nelson street to keep five
goats for a year.-N.
The boy who took seat in our
paste-pot has been engaged at the Post
office to sit down on unsealed letters.-Ib
What is the difference between :jailol
and a jeweller? One watches cells and
the other sells watches.
A cynical lady, rather inclined tc
t1irt, says most men are like cold-very
easily caught, but hard to get rid of.
A Milesian astOunded a grocer BY en-
tering his store with this request "Mister
Mora, would you lind me an empty bar
rel Of flour to make a hen-coop fur me
dog"
"A gushing poet asked in the first line
of a recent etfIsion, How many weary
pilgrims lie?" We give it up; but expert
ence has taught us that there are good
many.
"A Rochester woman married to her
second husband recently said to him: ooh
how happy poor Charles would be if he
were still alive to see himself replaced by
a man as agreeable as you are.''
"A lady of literary turn writes to
know if she can pay for her paper by
writing poetry. Oh, certainly, we will
allow three cents pound for manuscript
poetry, or she can darn our stockings for
the amount-it's all the same to us. We
are in favor of patronizing home talent
Tonhers Gazette.
Sir Fletcher Norton was noted for his
want of courtesy. Pleading one day be
fore Lord Mansfield ON some question of
manorial right, he CHANGED to say: MY
Lord, | can illustrate the point in my own
person. myself have two little manors.' y
The Judge Immediately interposed, with
his usual blandish smile, :" We all know
it, Sir Fletcher.'
1t is told Of one of our citizens who
has recently been made a father that he
enjoys the heir hugely. Being of a social
turn he attends many parties, and on his
departure places the sweet cherub in bed,
On his return he gets into the place
warmed by the darling, and puts the dar-
ling at the foot of the bed where he can
keep his feet on it. He says cold room
is the healthiest to sleep in, and that a
register is not only folly but positive
njury-Dmbury Neacs.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
Speed of the Carrier-Pigeon.

The speed of the carrier-pigeon has been
generally overrated. Careful experiments
have shown that thirty miles an hour is
the average, although, in few well-au-
thentlcated instances, thrice that speed has
been attained. In 1903 an English gentle
man laid large wager that his pigeons
could fly thirty five miles an hour To
decide the question, three of his trained
BIRDS were taken exactly that distance
from his residence and let loose in the
presence of witnesses. They arrived home
together in just fifty three minutes, or sew
en- minutes ahead of time. In 1888, during
the great annual trial of carrier-pigeons at
Ghent twenty four birds were let fly at
houen, one hundred and fifty miles dis
!ant, at five minutes before ten in the morn
ing. Their flight was carefully timed
One OF them reached Client in one hour
ana thirty minutes, having traversed the
distance at the marvellous rate of more
t til ninety miles an hour. Sixteen made
the Journey in two hours and half Sew
eral were never heard from. In the East
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
DOMESTIC.

Gold closed in New York on the 18th at III 4
@1l7&.
Details of the the peace conference at Camp
Verde, April 6, were received on the 10th, The
conference resulted in the unconditional sub
mission and surrender of the two worst bands
of the Apaches. Peace was brought about
through the complete rout of the Apaches,
who have for the last twenty years detied the
Government, Over 200 warriors have been
killed in the last campaign in the Businesses of
tho Apache country.
A dreadful accident occurred on the Ston-
ington 4 Providence Railroad on the 10th.
While running from Stonngton to Boston, a
passenger train fell through the bridge at
the Richmond switch. Six cars were burned
three passenger and three baggage-and seven
passengers were killed outright or burned to
death. The engineer and firemen were burned
to crisp at their posts. 4 special dispatch OF
the Goth gives the following particulars:
1.-THE train left Stonington about thirty five
minutes late, and was running at the rate of
forty miles per hour. As it approached
the bridge the fireman and engine
driver became aware of the existence
of the watery gulf before them.
but saw the danger too late to prevent the dis
astcr or even save their own lives by leapinp
from the engine The locomotive jumped the
gap, about thirty feet wide, and landed on the
other side in a sand bank, plunging into it
with such force as to wreck her completely.
Some idea of her speed may be ascertained
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
PERSONAL.

President Grant and party reached ST. Louis
on the 18th.
The Supreme Lodge of the World of the
Knights of Pythias adjourned on the goth, to
meet at Pittsburg on the Sd of April, 1874.
The Court of Claims at Washington has
rendered Judgment against the United States
in favor of ex-senator Alexander Caldwell for
| $500, 500 on contract for army transportation
in Nebraska in 1866. Chief-Justice Drake dis
scented.
Joseph O'Neal, of Fulton, ILL.,, has been sen
fenced to be hanged for a murder committed
on an island in the Mississippi River, near that
place, some time last fall.
On the 22d the first colored graduate of the
Law School in the District of Columbia was
admitted to practice in the Supreme Court of
the District.
According to recent statement III the New
York Tribune, arrangements have been made
for 1900 passengers to Europe by steamships
sailing from New York during the next three
months.
Henry Fralich was hanged in Syracuse, n.
Y. a few days ago, for the killing, in August
last, of Peter Schaaffer.
President Grant and party left ST Louis on
the morning of the oath for Denver.
1t is stated in Washington dispatch of the
25th that the Commissioners to the Vienna
Exposition have been suspended and Legrand
B. Cannon, Theodore Roosevelt and Charles T.
Spang, now in Vienna, and Jackson S. Schultz,
VIM. H. Aspinwall, Samuel G. Ward, William
T. Blodgett and James Rcnwick will act until
the suspensions are removed or permanent
Commissioners are appointed. The scientific
and honorary Commissioners do not come UNI
der the operation Of the suspension order.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

wonderful stories are told of their speed
and endurance The traveller LithgoW
tells us that one will carry letter from
Babylon to Aleppo in forty-eight hours,
the places being thirty days journey apart
by the slow modes of travel USED I'D the
East. But the stories OF early travellers
are to be taken with many grains OF allow
ance. Although for short distance, or
in exceptional cases, the carrler-plgeoh
may attain a much greater speed, thlrty
miles an hour is probably its average. IL
could not sustain long flight with great
er velocity sE#
Even this speed cannot be maintained
without rest, for the carrier pigeon has
not the endurance which belongs to many
birds of passage 1t always descends at
night for shelter and repose, and hence 1t
can rarely fiy across a wide eXpanse OF
water. To this was partly owing the fail
rlre of the attempt to use them for convey
ing intelligence from the Arctic explorers,
and partly to another cause. Some writers,
chiefly poets and romancers, would have
us believe that the carrier pigeon finds his
way home from remote places by kind
of instinct; but this is not the case. Its
flight is guided by sight alone. When let
loose from confinement it rises to great
height in the air by a series OF constantly
charging circles until it catches sight OF
some familiar landmark by which to di-
rect its course. Ii flown on a foggy day 1t
soon becomes bcWildcred, and either re-
turns to the place Of flight or is lost. Let
loose from a balloon on clear day, and
too far above the ground for objects there
on to be discerned, even by its piercing
vision, instead of rising, it drops perpcn.
dicuarly like a plummet, until it nears the
earth, when it begins to wheel round in a
descending spiral, constantly Increasing in
| diameter, evidently for the purpose above
mentioned of ascertaining its locality, and
| discovering some indications for the direc
| ton of its course.-Harper''s Nagoz5ne.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
FACTS AND FIGURES.

E;f,v new oranges of the Patrons OF
Uusbandry have been instituted IN Mlnht
sofa during the past year
Toyas cattle dealers say that full 800
900 collie will be driven from that country
through to Kansas this season ;,
A hoy eight years old at Lowen
Mass. spelled 1000 words without miss,
and he but 100 to the committee ana 'hey
missed fifteen.
MANY of the Cardinals in the Roman
Catholic Church have reached extreme
old age. Billet is 80; De Angels, 81 !;
Caterini, 10; Amat, rs; Grasselllnl, rs
Matthew, II; Antonucci, 70; Patrlzl, 20.
California has $4,000 square miles
less area than France, but it IS asserted
that the actual area in California
which can be successfully devoted to
cranes will exceed that of France III the
nronortion of A to 1, which would be 10
600 600 acres for California anc 4,oOo,ooo
for France.
The lumber trade Of Minnesota now
amounts to 5000, 100000 feet per annuln
but as even this enormous cutting IS sup
posed only to keep pace with the annual
growth, this vast preserve may be said 10
be almost virtually intact. These Missls-
sippi pneries extend from the head wafer
of the great river eastward to the MON
trcal River in Wisconsin, occupying near
" all of Northwestern Minnesota ana part
Of n Northwestern Wisconsin, and covering
an area Of about 10000 square miles.
Statistics show that the present sup
ply Of sugar in Europe and America
amounts to 375,5S7 tons, against 262, 52o
tons as compared with 1872, showing. an
increase Of nearly fifty per cent. over last
year. The increase in the several coun
tries which go to make up this aggregate
is quite general, excepting in the United
States the stock being Al ,105 tons, against
1876 tons, while the stock in the United
Kingdom is 1872, 743 tons, against 96,oOt
tons, The supplies yet to come forward
from Cuba, Brazil, Java, the West Indies
etc. promise to be fully as large as those
OF last year. "
The Mic1igaa Farmer, in an able arti
Gle on the wheat Of the world, thus est
mates the surplus wheat in the several
countries named:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

CHHDREN's BIBs.-Do all mothers know
that children's bibs, made of light rubber
cloth, and pinked, or bound with ribbon,
are very serviceable for table use, only
needing to be cleaned by rubbing with a
damp cloths
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

COUGHS AND CoLps.-Those who are suffer
ing from Coughs, Colds, Hoarseness Sore
dhroat' &c, should try "Bro,ou,s Bronc1;aj
Troches" 0'''' Dfo''chtaas
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

To cook Goldfish so as to make it
really delicate and agreeable, break it into
small pieces, and soak it three or four
hours in cold water, and then drain it off.
Then put it on the fire. with the addition of
milk, butter, pepper, and chopped boiled
egg. As soon as it scalds it is ready for
the table
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

in money was, in a great part, the result OF the
operations of two railroad Presidents, In con-
nection with the deposed President of another
road. Tom Scott was one of this trlumvlrate,
j. F. Tracy, President of the Northwestern ana
Rock Island Roads, was another, and JAY
Gould, ex-President of the Erie, was the third.
News from the Modoc country up the 23th
states that there had been no fighting since the
18th. It was reported that the Modocs had
left the lava-bed.
The epizootic has at last reached the Pacific
coast, and at San, Francisco business was greatly
impeded for want of horses. Cinnamon were
employed to carry and haul burdens.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

The number Of railroad ties in present
use in the United States is 150,000,0O0. A
cut of 200 ties to the acre is above rather
than under the average, and it therefore
has required the product of ID, 600 acres of
wcll-timbered land to furnish this sup
ply. Railroad ties last about five years,
consequently 3O000,00O ties are used annu-
ally for repairs, taking the timber from
10000 acres. The manufacture ofrolling
stock disposes of the entire yield of $50
900 acres, and full supply Of nearly 100000
acres more every year. 1t appears, then,
that our railroads are stripping the coun-
try at the rate of 900, 900 acres per annum,
and the demands are rapidly increasing.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01
Spring in1hnG

:" IVY ''e"'eo feg'eas L., B
always an unhealthy season
riched by decomposed yegetss.
when first barred to the SIM. 1,
miasmatic vapor that sspe,ats, -.
termittent and remittefIts 20, 4 q
swampy districts, the deltas A.
the salt-ma--hes on the coasf. i
Gulf States, and the shores Of
are also visited at this sea.o. =
denies that PROSTATE no ineonss
their inhabitants. This ought NJ. q
easily be prevented. No facr +,
better established than the f.. III
Stomach Bitters viii avert ever :.
Gus disorder. A course of tbj. Al
Alternative commenced in adva,,. ph
season and continued regula-Iy p DO
prove an absolute protection
fever, bilious remittent fever ana Il,
of a periodical type, as well Ba
turbances in the digestive o--.,. .,
common at this period Of the NJ
for dyspepsia, biliousness. Eya.
disorders, physical weakness =. D
choly, hysteria, and ailment. IA "
sex are exclusively subject, 2. Pl
has no competitor at home or s5,- CT
ARTHUR's ILLUSTRATED z =,
zISE.-Among the interesting Can, .
number are: Frontispiece-s p. u
Homestead; The Sleeping Bat |.
Straights of Magellan-illu.,-s =
Friends Meetings; Iceland q
Nursery Lessons; The Com;gr $, =
Cappercaillie- ILLUSTRATED; Coin. i,
Illustrated; A Day Lost; The Il q
Illustrated; The Deac0ns Hy, .
Phoebe Cary, and their Friend, !,
Hetty Henderson's Era: Neee,.4,,
Club; Insubordinalion-0r VI
Daughter. The different Hor.4, ~
are well filled with useful matt. 5,
year, or $50 for six months. vi d
clubs. \ beautiful steel en--s- Is
each subscriber, whether Si1s'a (.
dress t. 5. ARTHUR & Soy. Phi hi
GODEYs LADY's BOOK 81
ments III the May number IN
steel plate; a Stiff B. ri
some wood-cut; a C0la-
and one of the best T. ~ &c
sheets ever given in Til,
full department Of Designs. ne
soonest number of the year. Ii 20
are also very attractive. and NJ =
ton is given in the different All
ments. The publisher of tn. ID 60
magazine gives a handsome rar-
scriber for 1873, whether 4 IL, m
$500, or club Of six for sta RI
L. A. Cooley. Philadelphia. Pa
-- SO
THE PHRENoLOGCALI Gz so
is an excellent number, contain rs
larry Interesting features. anon = e
Portraits and Life Sketchs Of n =
leading Religious NewspsFers =
edge Past and Present; N0l,1: I.
Meaning illustrated; Does >l-7 A
thetic story; Building with Ra:-
the Human Race Degenerate !.
Gulf Stream Curiosities Of ii NJ
number merits general appro511l
read it. Price. 80 cents; three 1-- Il
cents; a years subscription, $ .t
Publisher, New York. III,
THE CHILDREN's HotR-!
this beautiful little maya L !
dneiner says: The CHit~sihi,,, Z
cites lively interest in Ii, al1, -
appears. Its illustrations ar
true to nature. that they strike Ut -
nocent minds of children a. SUI -
them, and the interesting and y !
which crowd its pages are a,1i2 so
S1-25 a year: five copies, s.; IL "
$40; extra inducements TO gei'5'
S. ARTHUR & Son. PhiIadepLs &c
GET RID OF A COLD At uA =
Jayne's Expectorant, certal g
monary and Bronchial Atfecuo2 'lg
THE more inveterate and UNI. -
Ague may prove, underortlhaTl ~
striking is the immediate bel1~' 81
Pills.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01


CoNsUMPT1oN.-For the cure of this dis
tressing disease there has been no medicine
yet discovered that can show more evidence
OF real merit that Aliens Lung Balsam, This
unequaled eXpectorant for curing consump
tlon, and all diseases leading to it, such as
a 8 OF the throat, lungs, and all dis
eases of the pulmonary organs. is introduced
TO the suffering public after it's merits for the
cure OF such diseases have been fully test ed
Dy the medical faculty. The Balsam ia. CON
sequently, recommended by physicians who
nave become acquainted with it's great suc
cess. S"e
1HE POISON MONGERs who advertise
compounds of Fluid Fire and puneent al
halles as "balsamic Medicines safe and
harmless tonlcs,' and genial invieorants ~
are worthy OF being classed with the old
I'arnegat Wreckers who kindled deceDtiye
peacons, IN order to decoy mariners TO in
eVltaple death. But time came when the
lures OF the coast bandits failed. and time
hos come when the vendors of FILTERED AL
cohol tail to impress the reading nublic
with belief in their fictons.
1t Is due to that conscientious and ab]a
physician, DIR. Joseph Walker, of Caljfor-
ma, 10 say that he has largely contributed
10 TINS desirable end, by providing the
world with Tonic Corrective and Anti
reprlIe Eegetabie preparation, which ac-
composites all that is mendaciouslv nrom
lSed on behalf of the alcoholic nostrums
His CALIFORNIA VINEGAR BITTERs nra
pared from botanic productions now for
me hrst time employed in the pharmacy
OF civilization, is the leading tonic IN
t every State and Territory in the Union
ne TACT that this wonderful elixir con.
1alns no alcohol, no mineral, no dancer
Gus element, is one of the causes Of tic
immense popularity; another is that as q
stomachlc lnvigorant, blood purifier al
teratlve, anti-spasmodic and anti bil;ous
, medicine, 1t Is as far ahead of every other
P hr,ln1 as Temperance is ahead Of
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

ASK for Prussing's Cider Vinegar and take
no other. Warranted to Preserve Pickles.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

Remedy for Mango in Swine-First,
wash the hog with soapsuds; then to one
pint of lard, while hot, add one ounce of
carbolic acid, stirring it until it is cool.
Rub the hog two or three times with this,
and give yourself no uneasiness about the
mango.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

GET RID OF A COLD AT N :
Jayne's Expectorant, a cerial Y
monary and Bronchial Atfecuo-' Il
THE more inveterate and uni g
Ague may prove, underortlhaT.. u
striking is the immediate beltl" s
Pills.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-01

fee at Washington has recently issued regula-
tons under the act providing for the sale Of
| United States lands containing coal, approved
| March 3 last, as follows:
| Any individual of II years of age and a citizen
of the United States. or who has declared his in
| tention to become such, may enter by legal sub
divisions any area not exceeding 100 acres. Any
| association may enter not TO exceed 32D acres.
Any association, If not less than four persons,
| who shall have expended not less than 5000
| in working aud improving any coal mine
| or mines. may enter not exceeding $40 acres.
The price per is so where the land is situated
| more than fifteen miles from any completed rail-
road, and $40 per where the land is within if-
| teen miles of such road. In conflicts, when i'm
| provements, etc. have been commenced subse-
quent TO March Sd last or shall be hereafter
! mcnced. priority of possession and improvement
j al govern the award. when the law has been
| fully complied with by each party. A mere pos
ments will not secure the contract TO the first
| cupent, when the subsequent claimant shows his
| full compliance with the law.
| A boy named Wilfred Fits is in Jail at Exc
| ter, \. H., charged with the killing of another
| boy, named Emerson, while he, the murderer,
was ina somnambulistic state Recently, while
| in similar condition. Fits got hold of razor
belonging to one of three prisoners in the Jail,
and attempted to cut their throats
| A singular affair has occurred in Madison,
| Wis. Several months ago one Jacob Smitz
mysteriously disappeared, and his wife made
| contradictory statements rs to his whereabouts,
| and 4 belief was entertained that she had
made away with him. A few days ago she
| locked up and left the house Believing she
| intended flight she was arrested, and the house
was entered by officers, who were assailed by
the missing man, who proved to be raving
| maniac, and who had been long time con-
cealed and cared for by his wife
A New York special says that it is now as
serted in Wall street, that the recent tightness
The Cairo bulletin. [volume] (Cairo, Ill.) 1872-1878, 1873-01-12
PRICE LIST OF rURs.

Ma NJ, l.. Wars, agent for Tho Union
Shuttle Sewing Machine, IL now in this
city. M. Watts is enthusiastic on the
subject ofths virtues Of the Union Shuttle
machine, and from our observation CT the
work done on the machine he showed to
", we believe his confidence to DO well
placed. He makes . speciality Of the sale
Of the hand machine, low-priced article
wSch does all work done by the usual fam
lily machines, and which may be bought
for the low price Of $40. The machine 10
SEAT out on trial Al low rates, aud Mr..
WVts is convinced it needs only thor.
ouEh trial to be thoroughly appreciated,
l.Stf
The Cairo bulletin. [volume] (Cairo, Ill.) 1872-1878, 1873-01-12
WINTER BOOTS AND
: SHOES.

Railroad men, far aers, draymen and all
others whose busineis lays out of doors,
and who for the preservation Of health
and good temper q ght to wear good
heovy waterproof boots, can get just what
they want by calling on VIM. Ehlers. He
makes French calf or kip boots, warranted
10 at we'll, wear we'll and give general sat
isfaction. lo-29.tf.
The Cairo bulletin. [volume] (Cairo, Ill.) 1872-1878, 1873-01-12

The Arlington hotel OF Washington,
u. T., for the third time since its opening,
has undergone complete embellisbment.
IL was originally fitted up in grand style
With every convenience, elegance and lux.
ury that experience, taste and iudgmen,
could desire and money accomplish.
During the summer succeeding il
WAS beautifully frescoed and reno
waited throughout. Within the
past two months all tho chsmbers have
been covered with the new style of corrus.
Gated gold and silver paper. The Hou.e
has becn re-pAinted, re.csrpeted, and n
number OF the rooms re-furnished. From
the constant efforts Of the Messrs Roessle,
to beautify and improve it. The Airing.
ton" is now Tar more luxurious and mag
niacent than when first opened. and is be-
yond question what they designed il should
be-The Hotel OF the capital l2.ll-w3m
The Cairo bulletin. [volume] (Cairo, Ill.) 1872-1878, 1873-01-12

@ M WV. ,BRswr has opened = day
boarding bodse in Buder's block, corner
Of Eighth ard Washington, and is pre-.
pared to accommodate an unlimited mum.
Der with day board at 81 so per week.
Meals will be furnished ut all hours ofthe
day In frst-class style. The table will be
supplied with the best the market and
the season affords. For particulars apply
at the house. l2.3l-lms