The Findlay Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Hancock County, Ohio) 1870-1881, 1873-07-25
E.V-E.R-YNIGHTl

According to the Bowling Green
Ky. .P0ntagTsph, a member Of the City
Council of that town, upon returning
home rather late the other evening,
was RECALLED by his good lady with an
animated address in something ike
this styly:
Every nightl Here it is half
past one O'Clock It's s wonder you
come home at all What-do-you
-think-a-womsn is made for ? /
do believe If a robber was to come
and carry me of, you wouldn't care
o ne cent What is it you say? City
Council must be attended to p City
Council businessI How do I know
you go to the City Council? ? Does
the City Council meet every night2
They don't meet but once in-New
York. But, / suppose, Bowling
Gre en- is a more important place.
On, yes-out e--v-r-y night. Twelve
o'clock-oue O'Clock. Here / stay
with the children, sl alone-lsying
awake half of the night waiting for
you. Couldn't come any sooner? ?
OF course you couldn't, II you didn't
want to. But know something yop
think / don't, but do that do. i
wish / didn't. Where were you
Monday night ? Tell me that. The
Marshal told me the City Council
didn't meet that night. Now, what
have you got to say? Couldn't, get
quorumr Well, If you couldn't,
why didn't you come home Out
e-y-e-r-y night-hunting-a-quo-
rum. Bet you wouldn't hunt me
this late, if 1 was missing. Where
were you Thursday night and Friday
night? There was q show in town,
wasn't there ? Do you always put
on your best vest anda clean shirt to
go to the Council? Whist did you
buy that bottle OF hsir-oil for and
hide it? 'Oil for your hone, indeed I,
Whoever heard OF hsir-oil for q whet-
stone? So you think / didn't see
you In the other room, brushing and
greasing your hair, and looking in the
glass at your pretty self I? "A
man ought to be decentp He ought,
ought he2 Yes, indeed, decent
man ought to be, and o decent mau
will stay at home with his wife some
times, and not be out e-V-e-r-y night.
How comes it that the City Council
didn't meet but twice q month last
year ? Trying to work it out of
debt y Yes, THAT'S probsble-very-
laughing and joking and smoking and
swapping lies will work debt of,
won't it NOw-I-want-to-know
-how-mueh- longer-you-are-
Observation-Disclosures ? Yes,
i want to know Out e-v-e-r-y
night. City Council, Free-masons,
Red Men, Odd-fellows, shows, hair
oil-and it's brush and brush until
you've nearly worn out the brush and
your head too. What is it you say 2
1t helps your business to keep up
your social relations 2 All, indeed f.
You've got relations here at home, sir.
They need keeping up some, 1 think.
What did you say about Catching it,
the other night at q euchre party
'Fellers, it's twelve O'Clock, but let's
play awhile longer we won't catch
it any worse when we get home A
pretty speech for q d-e-c-e-n-t man!
'Catch 1t = Catch itr Well, l in
tend you shall catch ia little.
What's that you say ? If wouldn't
fret you so you wsuld stay st home
more I, Well, say you do stay at
home few nights and try It, Per-
haps the fretting would stop. Out
e-v-e-r-y night because fret you 80.
What's that sir 'You know ladies
who amt always scoldiDg their hug
bandsp YOu do, do you? How
come you to know them? What bu-
siness had you to know them2 What
right have you to know whether other
women fret or not ? THAT'S always
the way! You men think that all
the other women are saints but your
wives. oh, yes-saints,s-a
I'll have you to know, sir, that there
isn't a woman in this town that's any
more Of saint than / am. / know
them all sir q h-e-a-p better than
you do. You see the sugar and hon.
ey side of them, and they-only-
see-the-honey-snd-sugar--side
Of-you- Now,sir,I / just want you to
know that if you don't stay at home
more than you do, Pll leave these
children to get burnt up. and I'll go
out e-v-e-r-y night. When poor
woman ge.s desperate, why, sir, she
is-desperate, that's ALL"