Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1873-01-24
BOYISH MISERY.
speahin, and recitation Day.

before dismissing school that ION next
Friday afternoon there will be no recita-
tions, but after hearing the resding lessons
every young lady will read an original COM
position, and every young man will COM
NIT piece TO memory, of poetry or prose,
which he will speak from this stand, and
those who fail to do eithe. viii be punish
ed"
How the perspiration started on the
brows of the timid ones as the solemn
speech was made. Even the boy who had
put his mittens on, under the desk, and
placed one foot out in the isle ready to ego
at the words 'school is dismissed" pulled
Off his mittens aud began scratching for a
book to take home "to learn something ont
of, and whisped profaity such as "darn It,
'confound the luck" came up from behind
the desks-and all felt as fthere was to be
an eclipse and no glass had been smoked,
except the one smart chap who had "rath-
er speak than not" and the girls who had
big SISTERS at dosrding schools, whose pre-
vious literary efforts at home afforded rare
charces for planiarism, which by little
help would deceive the teacher.
At last the anxiously awaited day arrives,
the forenoon is passed in the usual manner,
but at noon there is decided change made
in the appearance of the scholars and school
room. The ''big girls" are "dessed mp" for
the occasion. Their gowns are OF foer
texture than those worn during the week;
some are adorned with their mothers
"breastpin" and pair Of ''prize" earrings;
white stockings take the place Of the "liter-
ary blue" or black ones, which would not
lock so we'll on the platform (for there
were no dresses en- train in those days);
nearly all wore "beau catches" plastered on
the side of their foreheads, and charcoal
from the fireplace had been used as den
trifce during the intermission between fore
and afternoon.
The little barefooted girls appeared in
bright, copper-toed shoes and tape embroid-
cred pautalettes of the nankeen style.
With the boys there was also an attempt
at improved toilette, boots had been greas-
ed, paper collars turned, and portion ot
their Sunday go to meetin' clothes" donn-
ed for the occasion. Shocky heads of hair
had been combed into partial subsection,
and the boy with chspped hands had soak
ed his knuckles In bran and water until
portions of the original cuticle were visible.
The doctors son" exhaled powerful
aroma, all his fathers fRyoring essence,
and the tavern keepers" boy had anointed
himself with Jamaica" as a substitute for
Ibay rum" The "master," to maintain 9
dignity equal to the occasion, had also ex-
changed his everyday cost for ''swing-
tail" of fabulous length and shiny in spots
as ducks wing. The bell rings--reading
lessons are heard, books put away, the
speaking platform cleared for work, and
the show opens:
"Samuel Snubnosep' calls the teacher;
and Samuel" with parting glance at his
books, stumbles along toward the stand
where he becomes the target Of hundred
ewes and his face the color of a turkey
gobler's wattles. A bow, such as he would
have made if brick had atuck him at the
instant in the back Of the head, and he es
says to speak:
"The curfew tolls the knen of parting day
The lowing (pause) herds wind slowly O'er thu
lea,
The-the-(prompter) 'plowman'-plowmar
leaves the weary way
And plods the dark to wOrldness and to me.
Save from the yOnder ivy mantled tower
The mOping moon doth to the owl complain
(suickering)
Save Cte he he he) where the beetle wheels hi
best right bower
The teacher rsps on the desk and say:
samuel, no levity," and Samuel, who has
forgotten pretty much all his ''elergy," con-
cludes as follOws:G
Here T SITS his (ha-ha) head (snor) upon th'
lap of yearth
| A youth to (prolouged snicker) unknown
| Melancholy marked him at his-bfrth,
| AndsriencefrOwnedonh
sam goes 10 his seat and holds bis nOst
to keep from laughing out loud, while at
a nod rom the master "Lucinda Wirth'
trips all smiles and bushes to the platform
and after ,'kurtseyfng," proceeds to read il
an audible voice something about "Be kinC
IA thy father" The says, Louder" anC
we catch few words: "Yonr father loves
you and has bsen at great deal of expense
s-bringiug you up, so you should obey hin
| and not" here ensues a tumble o.
sounds which no one can interpret. which
cease, and after folding the composition
Lucinda" lays it on the teachers table fOl
inspection, "kirtsess" and goes to her seat
"George Francis Sprain," says the teacher
and spruce looking chap, whose hair il
goOse-oiled into curliness, steps boldly X
| to the front.
George Gkcs this business-and In ;
shrill voice he commences: "Not many
generations ago where you now sit enciy
cled by all that embellishes civilized life, The
| wild fox nodded in the wind, and the thistle
| dug his hole unscared"-and so he goei
| on; trausposing a sentence occasionally, bui
mainly right, and with firm voice, to the
end. We have seen George since he ar
| rived at mans estate; be now stands in the
| Police Court and defends "drunks" for fifty
| cenrs a case, and win or lose, and has &C
quired such q reputation that judge al
| ways came down harder on his clients thai
any others.
Miss Elizabeth steps forward and in 8
Susan B. Anthony style reads hifalutin
description of country lif5-how Gin the
| spring, when meadow larks are warbling,
and geese squsking, she loves to 60 out in,
| to the fields and Gull butter-cups and see
the little lambkins gamboling on the greer
grassy banks (green faro banks, her broth
er said she meant), and then return back
| to home again once more and help hel
mother stuff sausages, for if We are moi
| kind to our parents the sassenger meat Will
| spile," and really we have forgotten the
rest of Elzabeth's composition.
Then "Chales Bashfur starts for the
stand, accelerated in bis motion by apin-
| thrust, as he left the seat. He bows, and
seeing a boy making faces, commenced to
snicker, until the teacher comes up by bis
side and raps his head with ihe ferule; this
causes more mirth, then more raps, until he
forgets his biece and is locked up in the
wood box in disgrace.
The minister's son, "MelviDe Winter
blossom" is then called to show the schol-
ars how good boy should speak. MsE-.
| vile looks as solemn as q vinegar jug, his
spiece" has been selected by his parents
principally for its moral tone: he says:
81 do most earnestly wish | could i1duce
all youthful individuals to diVest religion Of
its gloomy and repulsive associations; but
my lords, l ask no respite from death; l am
ready to die for my country, and sink ol
swim, revive and perish, am for the Un-
ion, one and inseparabla. Ny lords, were
/ an American as l am EDglishman"-hert
the teacher, who has been trying to finC
the original of the Orators remarks, stops
the medley, and Melville takes his srat. Ht
had been crammed with so many piece:
that he had not been able to distinguish be
tween them, and thus defeated his parent!
aims. But why continue this subject Tht
good little girls recited "Mary's Lamb
very nicely, and the good little boy" spoke
his antitObaccO piece as follows:
| G'I1l never chew tobaccO-no
| Said little Robert Reed;
! I'll never put ii in my mouth,
| 1t is a filthy weed"
By the way we saw this good boy a few
days ago; he now chews plug tobacco like