The weekly Shasta courier. [volume] (Shasta, Calif.) 1872-190?, 1873-06-21
ANECDOTES,


"You say do" was the answer.
Come, sir, answer-what is your relip-
ionf"
1.-THE true religion" d
"What religion is that ?"
"My religion"
"And what's your religion ?"
b any mothers religion"
And what was your mothers religion ? ,
She TUX whisky in her tay"
"Come, now,iH find you out, cunning
as you are. You bless yourself, don't you p
when l am done with you l think ]
ought.
What place of worship do you attend p
The most convaiDyant." ----s--s=
But of what persuasion are your"
"My persuasion is that you won't find ii
out" EEz
"What is your belief" eSe.s
my belief is that you are puzzled"
"Do you confess?"
"Not to you"
"Come, now I have you. Who would
you send for if you were likely to die?"
"Dr. Grawln"
Mot for the priestf"
" l must first get messenger"
"Confound your quibbling- tell me, then
what your opinions are-your conscientious
principles. I mean?" E5.t1T
"They are the same as my landlords"
"Ard what are your landlords opinions ?'
Fax, his opinion is that l won't pay
him the last hall years rent, and Pm Of
the same opinion meself."
A WISE JuDGE.-A certain merchant
left in his last testament seventeen horses
to be divided among his three sons, accord
ing to the following proportions The first
was to receive half the second one-third
and the youngest one-ninth part of the
whole. But when they came to arrange
about the division, it was found that to
comply with the terms of the will, without
sacrificing one or more of the animals
was impossible. Puzzled in the extreme,
they repaired to the Cad, who having
read the WILL observed that such diff,
cult question required time for delibera-
ton, and commanded them to return af-
ter two days! When they again made
their appearance. the judge said:
Il have considered carefully your case,
and | find l can make such division Of
the seventeen horses among you as will give
each more than his strict share, and yet not
one Of the animals shall be injured. Are
you content ?"
ave are, o Judge" was the reply.
Bring forth the seventeen horses and
let them be placed in the court" said the
Cadi.
The animals were brought, and the Judge
ordered his groom to place his own horse
with them He babe the eldest brother
count the horses.
They are eighteen in number, o Judge,
he said
al will now make the division" observed
the Cadi. You, the eldest, are entitled tc
half; take, then, nine of the horses. You
the second son. are to receive one-third
take, therefore, six while to you, the young
est, belongs the ninth part, namely two
Thus, the seventeen horses are divided
among you; you have each more than YOU
share, and l may now take my own steed
back again."
"Mashallah !" exclaimed the brothers
with delight. 90, Cadi, your wisdom
equals that of our lord, Saleiman Ibn
Daood."
THE WRONG MAN-Dick Wood, candi-
date for Congress in this district, while can
wasting the mountains the other day, was
compelled to imbibe good deal of apple
lack in order to convince the natives that
he was not one of those high flyers" who
think themselves made of superior stuff to
"the honest and hardy yeomanry." The
consequence was that Dick-after giving or
ders to be woke up at clock in the morn
ing, that he might be able to reach distant
appontment-when he retired to rest, was
in five minutes as good as dead man."
Some scamps procured some lamp-black
and thoroughly blackened his face. Next
morning, promptly at 3 o'clock, he was
aroused, and was in such hurry to be of
that he did not take time 10 wash, but bolt
ed his breakfast and rode away at a brisk
gait Arriving at his destination, he hunt
ed up prominent politician, to whom he
had letter of Introduction, and presented
his credentials. The gentleman read the
letter. alternating the reading with chances
at Dicks face, and then asked:
Are you Major Wood, of Mount Ster
ling"
"That's my name sir" replied Dick.
"Why, thought you were a white man,
said the other.
Greatly astonished, Dick " blurted out
"and so am
well you have a cussed black skin for {
white man."
"What the devil do you mean?" asked
Dick" angrily, do you mean to insul
me?"
mo, sir, but you had not better speal
here to-day. Our boys won't stand 6
speech from nigger."
"A nigger!" cried Dick Z" why there
amt drop of niger blood in my veins.
am just as white as any man that step;
out !"
Seeing a looking glass on the wall
" Dick stepped up and looked in it. Start
ing back with an oath that fairly made the
windows rattle, he exclaimed:
"Well, If the cussed fools at Wytheville
havnt walked up the wrong man, and Wood
is over there yet. - ....
jerking off his hat, he dropped into a
chair, and began vigorously to fan himself
The other seeing his straight hair, and
noticing that the back Of his neck appear
ed to be white, suggested soap and water.
Barham Tom of Ingoldsby) was at q
dinner where they were telling about an
invention for extracting the ink from
parchment, and reducing the parchment
itself to pure gelatine. Good" said
Barham, "now man may eat not only
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