The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1873-08-14
VOLUME IX.---No. 8.
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

All SSOT Us Ol
- The moment man is satisfied with him
SELF every one else is dissatisfied with him.
Why are young ladies so partial to sunset
and twilight? Because they are daughters of
Eve
- What unthankfulness to think so much
on two or three crosses, as to forget hundred
blessings. -. 7Ai .s--sSs
= Mrs. Partington thinks that the grocers
ought to hire a music-teacher to teach them
the scales correctly.
Some people live without purpose, and
pass through the world like straws on river
mere passengets.
An Englishman has discovered that there
are ffty.four distinct varieties of feas. One
is enough for all practical purposes.
"A Connecticut man is going to move out
eof the State, right away, because the trustees
fof cemetery object to his raising onions on
his cemetery lot
The hegro who was hanged at Suffolk,
Virginia, the other day, remarked as he was
going to the gallows: II wish dey had put it
off till after watermelon time"
-"What shall I.give my boy to make him
honored and respected ?" writes an afe&iohate
father Education and moral precepts were
once required to accomplish this purpose, but
diamond pin now covers the ground.
= One of the late boys, while reading chap
ter of Genesis, paused to ask his mother if boys
in olden time used to do their sums on the
ground. 1t was discovered that he had been
reading the passage, "and the SONS of men
multiplied on the face of the EARTH"
= st. Louis journal tells the story of
Missouri youth who has been fearfully perse-
cuted by married woman who loves him to
distraction. She has followed him everywhere,
and his parents hustled him offper the Kansas
Pacific road the other day; but before the
train had gone ten miles the woman burst
her arms about the young mans neck. He is
now making arrangements for the purchase Of
burglar proof safe with duplex elliptic
combination lock.
"A Nashville man was awakened the other
night by pain in his stomach, and thinking
that the cholera was at hand, he clutched for
q bottle of camphor which he kept on the table
for instant use, and commenced to apply it
with vigorous rubbing to his abdomen. He
experienced immediate relief, but was consid-
erably surprised at not perceiving the strong
scent of camphor .Suspecting that he might
have made mistake, he lighted the gas and
made an inspection, which resulted in the dis
covery that instead of camphor, he had used
bottle of ink.
= From Columbus, Ohio, comes one of
those singular episodes which seem to justifya a
belief in the supernatural. A lady in that
place was awakened from her first sleep the
other night by mysterious voice exclaiming,
"Your brother William is dead" At this
spectral warning; of course, she screamed and
swooned and would not be comforted, and
passed the rest of the night in tears and harts-
horn despite the consolatory skepticism of her
attendants. And the curious part OF the story
is that the very next day she received letter
from this identical brother in neighboring
city announcing that he was quite we'll and in
possession of profitable contract with the
town authorities.
In one of the towns of Mississippi, two
coloredsmen were arrested on the charge of
burglary. The jury before whom they were
tried were all colored. After the case was
tried they retired and made up verdict, which
was announced to the court. On being called,
the Judge asked for the verdict, which the FORE
man delivered as follows: "Dis jury find dat
one of de cuse busted in de sto', and stole dat
bacon, and dat de oder didn't do nufin."
(Which one do you find guilty?" asked the
Judge "Dat's de question, boss" returned the
foreman "dat's jest what we can't find cut,
and we recommends dat dis honorable coat
Jest have auoder trial and find out which on
dem two niggels steal dat bacon"