Lexington weekly intelligencer. (Lexington, Mo.) 1871-1887, 1873-05-21

8 lstis & .las. ss4llas & 81
There was once q little boy named
Tommy, who road tile New York
Ledger" TIL his mind bccnme filled
with all kinds of stories about the
sea. So no told his father TINT he
wanted to DO a pirnte. But his IA.
ther told him IL wns jnst as good to
be q politician. Then Tommy cried
md said, .'No, lio would DO pirate
or nothing.n
Ills kind father took him on his
knee, aud said: 'sMy dear boy. yon
have noble character. but why do
you want to DO q pirate? IL it not ts
sail In ship on tho sca,, with big
cutlass in yonr belt, and TO kill other
people aud get lots Of money, aud live
in cave on soma lovely island? That
is tho way that Capiain Kidd dill,
and many other bold sailors In the
good old timos now gone. But, Tom
my, IL is not tho fashion to do those
things now, aud ifyou tried II you
would soon be caught and hanged.
Tommy, aud how would .yoa like
that? Papa don'tswnnt his little son
to be hung. So let us hear no n,ore
Of piracy; your education shall here
after be conducted with n yirw To
politics. So run away, papa's busy
now."
'sNo, father" said Tommy. al want
to know what is n poliiiciaii.'t
"A politician" said his father. "is 4
kind of o pirate-a land pirate who
does, in gentccl and easv way. W hat
Captain Kidd and the Black yucca-
neer of the Gulf did so cluHsliy aud
at such great risk. Those pirates
plundered individuals; the politician
plumbers tho whole community,
city, State, and sometimes n nation.
lie makes much money, and becomes
q great man. Father is trying 10 be
a politician himself"
Little Tommy's eyes sparkled with
delight; he clasped his hands and
cried, 10 daddy! want to be n poll
tician! Tell mo about some Of them.
Did YOU over see one!'
"Ies; and YOU can rehd ofthem in
the papers, in which the criminal
stories are much more wonderful
than the New York "Ledger" tales.
You should read the debates in Con-
gress. i'll the Legislature, and in
Councils, Tommy. They will fire
your youthful ambition"
"Tell me some of these stories,
please" said Tommy.
swell, once upon time" said his
father, "there was nn old pirate
named Amee, who had a band OF
other pirates who called themselves
the Credit Mobil:ers. There was a
great railroad worth lois OF money,
ns,I thn troasnrv nf Tim nnnnlr
there was lots more. So Ames and
his band made a raid upon the road
and the treasury, and stole millions
of dollars. After awhile they were
caught, and the Congress of tlse Uni.
ted States pretended to try them.
But see, Tommy ,Ihow nice ieis. to be a
politician. Had they been pirates
they would have been put in prison,
but as they were only politicians,
Congress let them 90, and said they
did Yothing wrong"
"Tell me another story, please, ia.
ther," said Tommy.
"Weu. another time there was q
pirah III mean politician, who went
round at election time cheating; and
he cheated. and he cheated, and he
cheated inst as iaptain Kidd sailed
and sailed. and sailed. Well he wa.
caught and put in prison. Yes, Tom
nv the NAUGHTY Judges sent him tC
tprison for three wears. But. becaus,
he was n politicien, the Presiden
pardoued him in three weeks. Now
| il he had been a pirate, they woult
have kent him in iajl,"
"Just one more story, papa," saiC
Tommy, 81 like these stories mucl
better than the others, for they arr
true.,'
..Tbe Evans case,'' said his father
tn himself in n ,nusiu~ way. "tht
n,rdnm of ycrkcs water denartmeut
convicted felons in Office, Caldwell
| Pomeroy.s Ppttersou-hum!s hum
,hnre h"nenrs,s ors s,scl n lot Of GOOD stories
Tommy that I don't know whic! t.
toll vnu Wei, think itoyer some
other time. But if YOU really inteut
to be a politician, there is Il grea
dnal tn learn aud YOU must stud,
now now ~, wbon ron arc Young"
eyes. father. | will., said Tommy
"When was bow" continued hi!
father s.I did not have YOUR aivan
tages. Nv parents sent me to SUN
day-school. and whipped me when
stole anules told tibs, [ was afraiC
| to devnlon nv natural talents, They
taurht me that it was wrong to looi
a man in the face and say one thing
and even swear to it.'aud' then go ant
do another. So all nv bovhood wa:
wasted in the pursuit of virtue, anc
when became a man was as greer
as YOU are now. But YOU my boy
shall have the benefit of the educa
tion which was refused to your ole
daddy. Oh. Tommy, if my parent.
had brought me up right-that is,
! mean, wrong-I might have been ,
much more successful man. l might
have deem a Credit Mobilier. l NIGH
have stolen million of dollars.
might have kept keno shop.
might even have been in cau-cau
cus-and tried-to kick somebody
out-for vo-votlng right'-and the
old man, overcome by his grit, burs
into tears.
"Don't cry, father sobbed Tom
my, too, "when / get to be man III
make it all right"
eyes, my son." said his father calm
ing himself, "thati is my fondest hope
You may fulfil the destiny refused tt
me. 1t is my ardent prayer that
may live to see the day when yot
will be gloriously pardoned by sont
future Governor, or triumphantly &C
quilted by some Investigating com
mittec now unborn of some offenct
of which Won will he notoriOuslN