The Toledo chronicle. [volume] (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1873-1924, 1873-07-17

IS Va ~ him h,s vrow- I s,sssd,
except droo der medium auf de-
bapers.
Consekerwendly you see dot W,
vas a most Intelligent deeples. So
will improve my insertion.
| A tellar, Won OF our cidizens, stood
him auf der mout OF der Washington
Sdreet Dunnels, during der chu bilee
und sharged all verdant looking CUP.
pies two shillings to vent dhroo der
great Chicago refrigerator.
Won of our mosht esteemable first
ladies vas caught schlnuggling der
moosick from Gilmore's band ayav .
on examination it vas found oud dot
she hat der whole prass paud-py
her hoop skird.
A mosht yordy vellar citizen aui
der chupiloe, who couldn't see pooty
veil, on account init der peoples vat
sthood up befront hlm, EXCLAIMED off
Q loud voices. "Sot down, every ones
or peoples will dook you for goundry
folks;' init dot efery Won sat him
right away gwick down, auf Won &C.
cordoon.
Our milidary droops did fight der
Modoctors init grade veheemances !;
dhey did look dem high und bU for
'em, but dhey don't could durn Jack
up. Pooty gwick Jack dnrn himself
ub--lot vas a misdeal.
Since ladely ! hafc peen receiving
ledsers auf mine country admirers,
who hafe read desc ledters, regwest
dot should answer der konundrums
und do him:
unp4Ypet MsaS As1r; sa yJs to y:a% goas to church
pare iectcd; you may hafe a good
lookin foot, but der bceplcs don't
could see dot.
Jake--A leedle hard soap une vas
ser, rub briskly, und dhry init dhry
bowels.
Aen.Peckcd Huspand--Dhrow a
beef steak plate, steak und all auf her
headt aut no sleak vas cut der da.
plses, broiled mackeral will done
yoost SO peter.
Pridget--Dher skhelcdon shkirdt
vas not made init q dead vooman's
bones oudt.
Lldderati-Dher New Yorg Graph
ic vas meier published py Brush, auf
Elkhart, Ind.
Hisdorlkal--Brush vas meter com.
mander in chief of der American Ma.
Wy.
Brush--Dook an inward bath init
gin und tanzy. Dot vos considered
an ontallible remedy.
hobe dot mine bunctuality will
render all habby marriage, und dot
dhey will lift to a green old age.
A fessel vas pass dhroo der ritter
yesterday, und der landlord yelled
himself oudt, "loosen dem sthays !"
! got me right away gwick, ashamed
auf der vimens vat heard him aut der
pridge.
Won Of our prominent panker men
ladely got him droubles nit tight
ness auf der chest. He vas stingy
like der duyfel. Efery night times he
put bis dhrunk NIT seckuridies under
his pillow, und he don't could shleep
Won n.outful, but youst lays awake to
hear him draw intrust oudt.
We hate got Won Chinese Laundry
man aut dot town, dot could put his
feets in his vest booklets While sthand.
in auf his head on. He teld me dat
Won ounces Of arscnicks put on togs
dali py q voomans. Will kill Chinese
in two minutes.
A Chicago chickens, who der past
fife or three months, hafe been dry.
ing to hatch door.knob, kommitted
suicide last week.
| A mans dot losht his eye in fight
init der dutch der odder day, got .
glass eye, und on ackound he got il
10 upside wrong, now reals der ba-
pers down eide up.
| We hste got high school glrls aui
desc cidy, und dhey hafs becooliar
faculdY Of burning themselves round
efery time . shendleman passes und
stares auf dhem. So / youst asked
one OF lhem Why for dhey ell dei
times done dot, und der gal did said
I've vas .lurned aroundt to got !
seckond look auf der fools in order te