davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

GENERAL LEE CoNvULsED.-An old
| lady who knew General r. Z. Lee almost;
from childhood declared that when he
was young man he enjoyed fun and in
| dulged III harmless frOlics as much as
| anybody. Later in life, and after his
sons became stout lads, it is said that he
was fond Of sleeping with them, in order
that ne might IN the morning engage in
| regular old fashioned romp and pillow
| fight with the BOYS. During the war
though habitually grave, as befitted a
commanding officer, he relished an oc-
casional joke very highly. When some
OF has staff mistoOk a jug of buttermilk
that had been sent him for "gOOd old
| apple-jac k" and made wry faces in gulD-
| ing it down, he did not attempt to con-
| ceal his merriment. So, too, when in
quiring into the nature of "this new
game, chuck-a-buck,' / think they call
| It," which had been introduced into his
army, there was a sly twinkle in his eve
that showed how shrewdly he guessed
It's rceal, purport as a gambling game. SO,
AGAIN, 1T Is reported that he appreciated
fully the " sell which wag on his staff
Palmed ottupon1 areporter, who promptly
| inserted 1t IN the papers. The reporter
wanted to know General Lees hour fer
dining. e
reply. 80 '-.'
meal?n ''''' - = Ava A'''''
Decidedly formal-in fact, may saw
| it is rigidly military dinner.h
" Military! how military?n
well, you see General Lee sits Mt the
head OF the table, and Colonel Chiffon
at the foot, and everything is done in
red-tape style.n
Red-tape at table! I don't under
derstand you. Please EXPLAIN
and never helps-all that is left to COL
Onel Chilton-but General Lee asks the
guests what they will have; they tell
| him, then he issues his orders, and Col
| Onel Chiffon executes them. That's aIl.v
GO on. go ont" opening his note
book; give me an examDie-teIl me-
exactly how it is done.n.
Suppose, then, that we have beef
we generally have beef. Grace is said
oy the chaplain, then General Lee rams
ON the table with the handle of his knife
and says 'Attention!' Everybody is 81
IenI. Every eye is turned toward GEN
eral Lee. He looks at one of us-me, for
example-and | rise and make military
be helped to? says General Lee. I saw
Beef make another salute, and sit
down. General Lee, fixing his eve on oiS
Colonel Chiffon, says, Beef, for CaDtain
c. My plate is passed, helped, and
then Colonel Chiffon, handing it to the
| servant, says:
| Beef for Captain C
By order of General Lee
X: II. Chiffon, A. A. G.'n
ana TINS absurd story went the round
pinGott.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

CLIMBING PLANTs.-Messrs. Briggs
Brothers thus speak of the yalne and
beauty of climbing plants =: "Climbing
plants, thus far, have not the prominence
III cultivation that they should have
taken, or in the future viii take. There
is scarcely a person who has the taste
and necessary location at command,
who. does not pay due and personal at
tention to bed of one or more varieties
OF the most common ANNALS but climb
ing plants seem to be, in q great meas
ure, forgotten by many lovers Of flowers ;
and many, when interTogated, say they
would have given climbers more at
tentiOn and greater prominence If sup
ports could be provided that are cheap,
airy, yet substantial, and beautify tie
surroundings, even when not covered
with vines and flowers
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

An individual having been convicted
upon rather slight evidence, the Judge
proceeded to pass Judgment as follows:
" Prisoner at the bar, you have been
found guilty, by jury Of your country
men, OF crime which subjects yOu to
the penalty of death. You say Won are
innOcent-the truth of that assertion ia
only. known to yourself and God. It ia
my duty to leave you for execution. IF
guilty, you richly deserve the fate which
awaits you; ifinnocent, it will be a graft
tication to feel that you were hanged
without such a crime on your conscience.
In either case, you will be delivered
from world of care.'
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

The Peoria (III.) Review has its old
man who reads that paper and no other,
and thus describes him: "Chewed to-
baccO sixty years and got fat on it.
Then he took to hard drink and followed
1t for twenty years; grew younger every
day. Now he reads his paper by moon
light alone, through an inverted micro
scope, to make the type appear small
enough for his eyesight. Walks four
miles every morning for his drinks he
fore breakfast. Chops cord of wood
between each meal. Tried to die of
old age thirteen times and failed every
whack. Attends to the wants of his
old and feeble grandson, and superin-
tends the funerals of his posteritT with
q decency becoming his years.n
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

your own living, and to marry-not for
a hOme-but for love. That good time
is coming, my darlings, though | may
not live to see it,"
"Is it, Auntie Eleanor?" asked her
nieces, laughingly.
Is it indeed Who can tell?-[Laura
Curtis Bullard, in Golden Age.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A man who gave the young idea les
sons in artillery practice in CharlestOWn
was in the habit of opening the session
OF the school with prayer, of which he
had two or three set forms. He USUALLY
went through these with his eyes closed,
but one day he opened them and saw
one young lady staring him in the face
with her eyes wide open. Without de-
he used on such occasions he went on.
"And may we never say-Matilda Pool.
stand on your stool" Matilda stood.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

"My brudders," said a waggish colored
man to a crowd, in all Affections, in
all OBJ your troubles, dar is one place
yQn kin always find sympathy"
"'Whar? WharF' shouted several. "In
de dictionary" he replied, rolling his
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A farmer who was sympathizing with
neighbor on the death of his son, said !:
You should recollect, neighbor Jones,
there is no loss without some gain,
John, you remember, was always a
mOnstrOus eater. | know he was res
pOnded the bereaved parent; but to
think he was laid up with rheumatism
all winter and died just in haying time
is pretty rough.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

An eccentric old fellow, who lives
alongside of a graveyard, was asked if
it was not an unpleasant location. "No,D
SAID he, 81 never jined places in all NV
life with a set of neighbOrs that minded
their own business so stiddKas thev dn.n
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

An Albany damsel asked one of her
fellow boarders, a stylish dry goods
clerk, at the breakfast table, "WRy is
your mOustache like my back hair -
He blushingly gave it up. The answer
caused him to blush still more: "Be-
cause it is all down.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

Josh Billings says" Mackerel inhabit
the sea generally; but those which in
habit the grocery alwus taste to me as
though they had been fattened on salt.
They want deal of freshning before
they're eatin', and also arterward. If I
can have mackerel for breakfast, can
generally make the other two meals of
Watern
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

THE TIDE.-Why do the recrimina-
tiOns of married couples resemble the
sound of waves on the shore? Because
they are murmurs of the tied
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

The Pittsburg girl has sent back those
two barges of coal, which her father
gave her for a bridal present, and says
she guesses she can make it hot enough
for hubby" without any outside help.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12
The HUHmOriSts' Column.
A little nonsense now and then,
Is relished by the wisest men.

Is that marble?" said gentleman,
pointing to bust of Kentucky's great
statesman. " No, sir; that's Clay quiet
ly replied the dealer
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A Cairo man warns people not to trust
his!%9,Tife, and she retoTts by saying that
he'll go without clothes all summer be-
fore She take in washing to rig him
ont again.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A chap given to statistics estimated
that over 10000 toes were frozen during
the past winter, by the young ladies
keeping their beaux lingering at the
gate, instead of asking them into the
parlOr,
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12
ENRERE EI...El TTNER FETs.


TT UNHRERs LUNHBERs LUH1BH8 -
- Choice Cypress and Pine Lumber, of every
dimension, and I'M unlimited quantities, sup
piled by the undersigned at Mount Pleasant
Mills, near Washington. We are receiving a
large lot of chain logs and viii fill with prompts
ness and dispatch all bills entrusted 10 Its.
Orders addressed to the undersigned at Wash
ingt01l, win receive immediate attention.
All kinds and any anOElntof Seasoned Lumber
always on hand, at Reduced Prices.
TeIms-Cash at the mill
FRANK MeNICoLL,
Mt, Pleasant Mills, July 8, 1871.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A. young lady student of startling
genius, who attends Rippon college,
lately declined the Latin pronoun, kic,
III the following manner: 'Hic, hRc,
hoe, hug-us, hug-us, hug-us."
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12
DRUG STORES.
RPELOUSAs DRUG STORE,
SIGN OF THE BIG MORTAR!
Opposite the Court House,
OPELoUSAs, LA.

The undersigned i'll returning his sincere
thanks for the very liberal patronage with
which he has heretofore been favored would
respectfully call the attention of all needing
anything in his line, to his
LARGE AND COMPLETE STOCK
of everything belonging to the Drug Business.
Physicians, Country Merchants and Planters
orders solicited.
Prescriptions will receive particular attention
at all hours of the day or night.
CLAUDIUS MAYO,
pbop
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

A minister walked six miles to marry
9 couple lately. He said he felt sort Of
fee-bill like, The groom saw it.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

Frozen whisky is shipped from Ken.
lucky as "medicated ice.h
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-07-12

All the popular Patent Remedies of this " Pro
gressive Age
Chemicals OF every description.
Eclectic Medicines.
Paints, Oils, and Window Glass. ... s..
School and Blank Books.
Stationery of every variety.
Toilet Articles, and New Choice Perfumery.
Pure Wines and Liquors for Medical Use.
Garden Seeds.
Tobacco, Cigars, Snuff, &C., &.
The proprietor deyotes his entire time and
study to eompoqnding and dispensing
TWenty-Three Years Of daily practice and
experience, with unremitting efforts and an
unfeigned desire to please, win serve, he hopes,
to keep alive and perpetuate the esteem and
patronage of his numerous customers.
Physicians and Planters orders respectfully
solicited.
Prescriptions carefully filled night and day,
with the most approved ingredients.
JOHN P0SEY,
s.-lzs5z ApOthecaFy.
Opelousas, August 10, 1871-tf
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05
A l. E x A Nd RIA,

MURDER OF BENNETT, THE FARMER-SHs-
pictOas CtccUBI SiGRoes.-At the cOroner's inquest
yesterday afternoon, on the body of John Ben
metz, the facts elected were as reported by US
and the jury found a verdict that the deceased
came to his death by being run over by the
cars, while in a state of intOxcation, and fully
exonerated the engineer. Sundry circumstances
throw upon the case strong suspicion of mur-
der. Mr.. Carrow, who keeps the restaurant at
jackson City, says Bennett stopped at his house
ON Iuesday night, and while there was accosted
by colored man, who told him he was a brother
OF Brown, blacksmith. near Anandale. BEN
nett re marked, elf You are Browns brother
come take drink, and III pay for it" The
Drink was taken, and the two got In the wagon.
whether the other cOlOred man got in, he did
not see. The wagon was found some distance
f.Om the body, and no horse tracks near it,
The horse was caught near the cotton factory
about O'Clock yesterday morning, with no
harness on him. Ia addition to these and the
circumstances mentioned before, Bennett
charged a 81 bill at jackson City, and yet had
but hve cents about his person when found
lie Is known to have had IS in cash when he
started from home, besides which he sold
marketing that day in Washington. Altogether
the case looks very suspicious, and ought to be
thoroughly Investigated.
ROBBERY AT THE HIGH SCHOOL.-The lava
tory and wsrd room of the Episcopal high
sChooi, near this city, was broken into last
night, and about $3.50 worth of clothing of the
pupils stolen. The room is the first floor back,
ana distant from the sleeping apartments. An
entrance was effected by bre1king out a sash.
Ex-cAPrAIN Of the chain gang. Basil War
ring, has been reappointed to that position bv
Superintendent Clifford vice John Smith re-
signed.-Sentinel, last eUening.
THE NEW WHARF at Marbury's point on the
opposite side of the river, is nearly completed
That on this side, to be erected at the foot of
Wilkes street, will be commenced within a few
days. IL will extend as far as the port warden
lire. The one on the opposite side is the ter
minus of the East Alexandria railroad; that on
this side of the terminus of the W. C., " M and
q. ). railroad, and the connection between
them, will be made by scows lowed by tug
boats.
ACCIDENTALLY SHoT.-Capt. Eph. Cheshire
was accidentally shot, and badly, though not
seriously, wounded in the legs YESTERDAY while
aucking down the river. Max McCrscken. who
was with him, discharged the gun by striking
his foot against the hammer.-GGsetts, last ere-
ming.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05
GEORG ETOW N

WON'T THE roLIcE look after the boys who
put stones and planks on the Metropolitan
street railroad every night; endangering the
house might cure the youngsters guilty OF these
reckless acts.
TIE SHIPMENTS OF COAL from Cumberland
for the week ending November 10Th amounted
tc 4S.1I5 tons, Is cwt, an increase compared with
The corresponding week of last year of $3.50 tons,
is cwt For the year to that date 2, fS6, rs tons,
10 cwt. were shipped, showing an increase over
the same period in 1872 of SO, 1872 tons, cwt.
Increase in railroad shipments, 366 ,0S2 tons, s
cwt.; decrease in canal shipments, 1880 tons, 5
cvt. During the week ending last evening IS
boats cleared this port, carrying 9,024 tons of
coal. This Is n large falling off from the ship.
ments of the previous week, ~ boats aud IL 07S
tons less, several of the companies having stop
ped shipping by canal.
MISUNDERSTANDING afternoon Mr.. II. W.
Barrett, of the Georgetown Savings Bank, was
married to Miss Mary McNeal, of this city, at
the residence of DIR. Lookermsn, by Rev. Dr.
W. W. Williams, of Christ (EpiscopaD church.
After the ceremony they left on wedding
tour.
WILL BIZ SENT TO THE INSANE ASYLUM
The relatives of the insane man captured yes
terday near the high service reservoir called to
see him, and state that his name is Aaron
Steiner, and that he cannot be controlled by
them at home. He will be sent to the Govern
ment Insane asylum.
RIVER NEws.--The steamer John Gibson
Cleared to-day for New York with ,450 barrels
of -four and $4,000 pounds of tallOw; and the
Express arrived from Baltimore with miscel-
laneOus cargo, and the schooner Maggie Fiske
arrived from Boston with government paper
furniture, and $50 tons of plaster for Hartley 4
Bro.
GRAIN TRADE-The schooner Kitty Ann ar
rived to-day with 800 bushels wheat for Hart
lev q Bro; and the canal boat Medley with
1900 bushels wheat for Hartley & Bro, and 100
bushels do. and 30 bushels oats for Il. e.
Wheeler The sales to-day were 1900 bushels
good to choice red wheat, at S17taSl.90.
CATTLE MARKET Furnished by Means &
COl-The offering of beef cattle yesterday at
the Droyer's Rest were 81, of which 44 were
sold to butchers, at Sc. to 5&c. per pound, and
90 were sold TO farmers, at Be. TO ca per pound
market very duh. 200 sheep were offered and
400 were sold at &c. 10 5kc. per pound 800 left
over. is cows and calves we're sold at $50 to 500
per head,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05
THE COURTS,
CTpCuTT pOUpT l.ygs AZ,

CIRCUIT COURT, Judge Ma1Ar'hWr.
To-day the case of Eastwood sgt. Darlington;
verdict for plaintiff Cornish Rgt. Graut-on tria
POLICE COURT, judge Smell.
TODAY. James King, loud and hoisterouS S..
violation Of cart law; SIS. Charles Henry, same;
IS Lizzie Washington, profanity; So. Charles
Gslilsou, breaEil ( the windows in Hancocs's res
taursnt; $40 and costs Rachel Johnson, larceny
OF clnhir 20, OF 80 days 10 Jail. Walter Gordon,
anti Kate Wells; SIS and costs. George Gross,
charged with obstructine tho cars the Metropol-
tan street railroad, BY placing wooden block on
boots; b and costs. George Ir graham, Edward
Smith and Edwa!d Fields, thrae colored, boys,
charged with stealing two sheet piles from lnm ber
gss;;u at rne vnr,I. lngrahsm discharged, and tie
others fined as each
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

DIVORCED FOR DssERTIoN.-To-day Judge
Wylie in the Equity Court made decree OF di.
vorce in the case of Eliza Jane Burch against
John Wesley Burch. The petitioner states tn 1t
they were married In May, 1872, by Rev. s. ID.
Finkel; that they lived together until Decem-
her. 1894. when he deserted her with q woman
named Lucy. Mr.. X. X. Elliott appeared for
petitioner, and Mr.. Cruikshauk took the testi-
mOuy.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

- S. II. BACON, ~
L. Market Space, three doors from 7th st., II
FAMILY GROCER,
has Tor sale 100 bbls Apples selected rr family .a
i00 bushels extra fine Northern Potatoes Wv
Finest extra and family Flour,
Extra Cream and Pine Apple Cheese
Finest old 50 gar cured Hams in the countrv
and Bic Coffee y
Kich favored G. p, Oolong, and Japan Teas
new Raisins, CuTrants, Oitron, Figs, and Nuts Of
The finest favored old Brsndies Whistles ana
wines; guaranteed pure. New Msckerel, very fat
and superior. '' 80
Family trade will find il their benefit to examine
my stock and cheap prices. octIs-Iv
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05
CITY ITEMS.

ALADY in our Deighborhooj who had su ffered
for over three months the most extreme torture
by a violent cough, has become completely
cured by DIR. Bulls Cough Syrup. For sale in
every drug store.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

The Will OF The late Whitman G. Bestor, has
been flied proven and admitted to probate. Tue
will is dated January 10th, 1870, and is wit
SEED by Thomas Hyde, c. @. Glover and W.
G. Hill. He hequeathes his whole estate, "au
and everything, of whatsoever kind or charac-
ter, in fee simple" TO his wife, Selma Bestor,
who be nOminRtes as sole executrix, and she
qualified by giving special bond in $4,000,
with Mr.. G. W. Riggs as surety.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05
Condensed Locals.

The SelstineI will be on duty tonight, ard has
lew words Of counsel for its d- M bfFauc
tTieDGs. See advertisement.
The friends OF Colonel 5. W. Owen VIII be
glad to learn that be is considerably better to-
The soiree of Profs Marini & Bates last nj sht
ives a fashiOnably attended and most brilliant
affair, ss heretofore.
See sd. OF subscription paper lost containing
the names of all the principal officers of the
government. Ii is Of gres; impOr snce 20 the
owner.
Yesterday afternoon a horse drawing a buggy
in which were two young men WAS driven over
board at the 18th street wharf AMI one of tae
men, John Baker, was Slightly injured.
the payment of pensions yesterday, and during
the day paid out over SIS, 500, 20 over sc hun
dTec pensioners in the aggregate.
The INST general reception OF the Young
Mems Christian Association occurs this even
ing at Lincoln hall. The beautiful Vesceiius
siSteTs will sing.
This afternoon. about O'Clock. an alarm Of
fire was sounded from box Il corner Is AMI T
streets nOrthvest) for slight fire m a dwelling
or street, between LIST and 2d, which resulted
IN but little damage,
Sfr John T. Ford has purchased al tn. far
niture of the East Room OF the White H0us',
which has been in use there from General
JscksSn's time TO the end OF President Grants
hrst term.
The officers selected by the managers Of the
Capitol Hill Hotel are John iiitz, president,
and General Ewing, vice president. The advis-
ory board Organized some DAYS since by the
appointment OF Dr. q. NJ. Ford as chairman,
and General 10 =. Walker as chairman pTO T. M.
- Many subscribers " in Georgetown write
that Bridge street has been nicely paved with
wood except the car track" and they want to
know "ShO are to clean that portion of the
street, fer II seems 10 does not belong to any one
for the cleaners never touch that portion of the
street, and the railroad company never will
uDiess they are compelled"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

TIE ROYAL INTERVAL GERMAN, nth bat
Talon, Pioneer Band, from Msyence on the
Rhine, announce two grand military concerts
at Lincoln Hall to-mOrrow-a matinee at 2
p. M, and grand concert at p. m. This band,
which appears in the Prussian uniform,
contains some fine performers and is highly
spoken Of by the papers in the cities where they
have anIlparal
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

AFFAIRS AT THE NAVY YARD.-Admral Por-
ter visited the Washington navy yard yesterday
and was received with the customary salute and
the hosting of the al miral's flag. While in the
yard he informed Commander Queen that he
had been promoted captain in the navy Rear
ADMIRAL Alden also visited the yard Yesterday
The steamer Lady of the Lake left the ward at
O'Clock yesterday with cargo of shrapnell,
shot, shell, and rope, for Norfolk, to be tran
shipped to New York. A discharge of six calk-
'eTs from the construction department took place
yesterday. This was rendered necessary by the
completion of the workof calking the Fortune
and Shawmut.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

PAINFUL INCIDENT OF THE HARD TIMES
Last night, about nine O'Clock, informa alton was
lodged at the sixth precinct station that two
young ladies-Misses Sarah T.. and Nellie Ted
Misunderstanding at No. 1914 9th street. were
missing, not having returned home at their
usual hour, and some anxiety was felt about
them. Subsequently some Of the second pre-
cinct officers found them and took them home
IL seems that owing to the dullness of business
they were thrown out of employment, and
dreaded returning homo and informing the
family Of the fact.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

THE TBEATERs.-Mr. j. II. Stoddard, the
eminent comedian, and the excellent company
from Walisckis TheateT, New York, appear az
FoTd's Opera House tonight IN a grand double
bi!, including 1.-The Americans in Paris" and
the beautiful play of 1.-The Secret Marriage -
The fine performances Of this company during
the week have afforded pleasure to a large num-
Der OF discriminating play -gOers.
Tonight il the last evening hut one of Miss
Maggie Mitchell as "FanchGn" AZ the National
Ikeater, and no one should fail to see this
charming represent alton.
The daring rider Miss Fisher. continues to as
tohish and aInuse large audiences st tue Thea
ter Comique by her Performance of"MazeDpa,' -
and the distribution of one hundred dollars in
silver among the patrons of the house every even
ing helps 10 keep the interest up.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-12-05

The VENERABLE ARoHpEAcoN SoorT, of
Durham, Canada Fast, saws that he suffered
from Dyspepsia more than twenty five years,
but that three weeks use of the Peruvian
Syrup ian Iron Tonic) has benefited him so
wonderfully that he can hardly persuade
himself of the reality, and people who know
him are astonished at the change. 6