The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1873-04-22
Uncle Joe Dopple's Story.
BIZ JUDGE CLARK.

Uncle Joe Dopplc's Story.
BIZ JUDGE CLARK. ~ es
We were hung jury, kept out by an
obstinate Judge, who told US the case
was q very plain one, at the same time
taking good care not to let us know on
echich side twas so very plain Most
of the testimony on both sides, we were
convinced, was false sand the problem
to be solved was one not usually presen-
ted in lawsuits--to ind out the truth by
striking q balance between contradictory
lies. Sa iiep f B hea
Being in for night of it, apparently,
and having regained toward each other
the good temper We had lost, quarrelin9
over the case, in final resolve to vindi
cate, against Judicial tyranny, the sacred
right Of juries to disagree,the next point
was how to get through the time.
"Somebody tell story" suggested
the foreman. "Mr. Dopples, you're an
Told settler.and must have met with some
adventures in pioneer times that would
be worth telling" fn
"Well, I hev seed some queer things"
said Mr.. Dopples-"Uncle Joe," bis
neighbors called him--a hale old man of
about sixty, with face full of good hu.
NOR and good sense II heu seed some
queer things, but I'm not much at nora
tin em.'' 4
aNever mind, Uncle joe" we said,
"you'll do it well enough"
"Well, boys, if you'll excuse mistakes
I'll tell you bout case that naought a
turned out deal seriouser nor this one
sGo on" we urged.
"This was hew it was," began Uncle
Joe, clearing his vocal hatchway by roll
Hing an immense quid into one cheek
l"When I'd made up my mind to come
out here and buy, Mother, as / call my
wife, she made me belt to kerry my
money in. Them was the days afore
greenbackses, an bank notes was no
great shakes eff they got too fur from
home. So land buyers mostly kerried
what they had In specify, which they
commonly did in belts buckled round
their bodies dodge the robbers soon
got up to, an the fust thing they did,
when they got hold Of chap, was to
look for his money belt.
"Well, / kissed Mother, an bid her
goodbye one mornin', an sot out to
hunt new home for us, ,kerryin the price
| of it with me in hard cash.
"Nothin' wuth mentionin' happened
| till one night / stopped at cabin, an
axt for lodgins.
"You can hev 'em,' was the answer !;
'that is, providin' you don't object to
sleepin' double, for another strangers
here afore you.'
81 didn't egsactly like the idee; but
houses was scarce in them parts, an not
lcarin' to resk goin' furder and fal;n wuss
l lit, an takin' my saddle bags on my
arm, led my critter round to the stable,
the proprietor shown the way,an' when
Ole Roam d been looked arter, we went
into the house
"Tother stranger was settin' by the
fire. an give me sharp looks as come
for'ard.. M
aGood evenin', sez Lam he sed SO too.
"Neither of us sed much more till ar
ter supper, which the settlers wife brung
in soon. The cookin' want equal to
Mothers, but hunger,you knows good
sass for emmy cook'ry.
"T'other stranger, ] noticed, kept
watchin' me sharp. didn't fancy his
looks much but arter spell he made
up to me quite friendly an sociable like,
an it was always my way to meet that
sort of thing half way.
tHe, too, was on the look out TO buy,
an we compared notes on the subject
till bedtime. Our host was one O. them
sottSo' chaps that listens good deal
without sayin' much, an his wife looked
as if she dursen't say much if she would.
"We paid ouf bills afore goin' to bed.
Tother traveller sed he was goin to start
afore day; but as our roads lay but a lit.
tie way together, I concluded ! wouldt
rise so soon for the sake of only that
much company. San up was early
enough for me. $50
"Our sleepin' room was one eend Of
the cabin petitioned off BY itself.
"'It's long time sence you an me
slept together sez the stranger, when we
was both ready to lay down
| $50 it's, seq L; which side do you
take? 9Fs2E
".Front,' sez he, sef it's all the same
to you a,aH
"All the same,' sez I jumpin' in.
"The stranger follered, an don't
know what he done, but soon fell
asleep.
81 don't know how late or early it was
when ! woke up feelin' chilly like. The
moon was shinin' bright through the
winder. The close was tnrned over from
the front side o the bed, and there stood
my bed-feller, leanin' over me with a big
knife in one hand, fumhlin at the buckle
O. my money belt with tother.
s"Of course you grasped the arm that
welded the knife, with one of your hands
and the villains throat with the other !!
interrupted clustering juryman.
/ "Well no, didn't"
"You cried out, then p
"Not that, either" u
"WelL" said the clustering turvrnan
|'I'd like to see the man that would rot
4 me without tussle for it. Suppose he
i had killed you-what, after all, is death
Only an eternal sleep, philosophy tells
u.s."
4 "That may be- said Uncle Joe, "but
you see, l want bit sleepy, just then
4 "Ha! ha!', laughed the foreman; %
never heard the eternal sleep theory
better answered"
Il "Well," continued Uncle Joe, 81 lay
as still as a mouse I'LL that pesky critte
ondone my belt, an slipped it from un
J der me, which he did so gentle that
har'ly felt it, wide awake as I was. Ther
| he. pulled the cover over me, an tuckin
!, it in as careful as Mother could done
} he buckled my belt about him, finished
> dressin' an slipped out"
: "And you lay there, and let yoursel
be robbed, without uttering word J
again broke in the clustering iuryman.