The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1873-01-11
"BE JUST AND FEAR NOT,
HI RICHMOND,

table. The little Tarts recoil like
so many diminutive Fourth O July
canons when the dishes clatter, and
hot coffee showers to the right and
left.
"Arentyou ashamed Of yourself!"
cries Mr.. Timothy, cracking his
fingers, and emitting flashes Of ig-
nited gunpowder from his orbs.
ssNo, I AREN'T;" hotly responds
Mrs. Tabatha, standing erect, and
the fuse of curl looks as though
it might soon begin to spit, and give
indications of violent explosion.
"You don't mean to say Timothy
Troddle Tart that I did that, when
you took it from my hand and THEN
let it fall"
81 mean to say just this, Mrs.
Tabiths Trundle: that you, by your
never varying and ever-tormenting
carelessness, have spilled my coffee,
scalded my hand, frightened the
children, and made me get very,
very angry!"
Fairly ignited now, these people
Of gunpowder make, these two of
explosive and combustible compo-
site parts, the dining room is filed
with fzzing, splitting, booming and
roaring.
The chips from the old block,
Tart, sit erect and observe the can
nonading of the old and well used
field pieces. They have the utmost
confidence in the workmanship of
both, and fear no random Shots
Mrs. Tart having completely rid
died her enemy, and, moreover,
Mr.. Tart having completely exhaus-
ted his ammunition, she put sherself
into her chair again, which induces
the other to do the same. There
| is no more touching off during the
meal, for Mr.. Tart has little to say.
| He Grams considerable of breakfast
into his mouth, munbles that he
must go, and begins to envelop
himself in the private clothing store
hanging on the wall near at hand
Mrs. Tart clears the table of the
dishes, the room of the children,
makes q dab at the chairs with q
dust thrush, washes up things hasi-
! ", charges here, assaults there, re
treats, inspects, reviews, and-her
work is done, and she is ever SO
glad to see Mrs. Cowsip come in
: for a moments chat, and asks her
to sit down by the stove.
) s9My husband has Just gone" re
: marks Mrs Tart to her very dear
} friend Mrs. Cowsip, who is gazing
pensively and abstractedly into the
, blank wall. II suppose you met him
: my dear, at the corner"
"Your husband oh! well, yes!'
, exclaims the lady of prettier nam.
3 than manners, 'sand dear Mrs. Tart
: you CAN'T imagine what he told me
I Indeed, I was perfectly dumb-found
ed. If my Alonzo should ever speal
3 thus of me I VOW / shouldn't liv,
with him moment longer than tina
: day" Mrs. Tart's eyes ignite. Th'
!, fuse is lighted. Look out for Al
explosion! She snaps her black orb
! and very hastily says:
: "What business had you, Mrs
! Cowslip, to stop my husband on tn
q public street and pump him in re
gard to his a3airs, I should like t
4 know?"
. "Why, Mrs. Tart, I didn't sto
i him. He stopped ME- HE begal
.. the conversation Don't be SO ha,
= = ty, Mrs. Tart"
e Mrs. Cowslip has not one grain {
% gunpowder in her constitution.
i Otherwise she would fare up at he
4 neighbor, and war of words woul
"a ensue.
~ sTm NOT hasty, Mrs Cleman
n. Cowslip, T1give you to understand
and would have you to know tbs
I am not favorable to any carrying
J, on between my husband and yo,
= or any other young married lady
% I'd like to know Just what he tol
:. you Will you be kind enough |
~ inform mei' Mrs. Tart has fairl
- frozen all these words and hurle
~ ~ them at her friend like big lumT
~ of hard ice. Mrs. Cowslip seen
- hurt, and looking at the slim, stragl
= = stiff snappy-eyed little woman, b
fore her, she says:
81 beg your pardon, Mrs. Tar
ln If you wish to know Tart's wore
u u I can give them. He simply I
~ marked that you are cross th
- morning"
se ssCross!" cried Mrs. Tart. sfCross
~ and away goes her dust brush
90 cross the room, and her fuse on Il
ne =, top of her head is almost fizzin
ue u similar to that of such an appen
ne age ON shooting cracker.
q sThat is al" quietly rejoins Il
other.
as II don't believe it, Mrs. Cowsli
~ I say I don believe that you ha
N ~ told me all I don't, l don't
DON II!
70 Poor Mrs. Cowslip Withdraw
we from this furious bombardment, al
us :. is forever afterward unacquaint
i.e with the gunpowdery wife. S
~ never ventures in the Tart yard,
,en =. enters the Tart dry goods store,
l1s ui ter that, which is altogether una
cie countable to Tart himself, his w
lls- m keeping silence on the subject.
.ef Mrs. Tabitha Trundle Tart new
aIe knew how to take compliments fro
.s 'aA any one whose name is not Torpl
nc her maiden name They,
OH compliments, If they come not fro