The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1873-11-15
Our 0lio.
The Mother and the Son.

Young ladies who have mothers living
and who duly respect them, will consider
it no ungallant thing for man to say that
a matronly, well-mannered and well in
formed woman is the pleasantest companion
possible to find Her conversation, full Of
the fruits of experience, the treasures of
reading, and the memories of life, is
instructive. Her manners, indicative of
the grace of self-possession and her con
sciousness of her title 10 respect, while
they show that she is herself at ease, put
whoever is in conversation with her in
the same pleasant position. She has none
of the hesitaney of some younger ladies', or
Of the fippancy Of others. She has no
impressions to make, and no danger of
misapprehension to avoid. She has no
fear Of herself as liable to make mistakes,
or distrust Of others as possibly able to
presume. She is, in word, thoroughly
poised person, who fills her agreeable place
in society as one who has won her posi-
ton; and who knows how to maintain it
without effort, and with perfect ease and
comfort.
The society Of such women is precisely
the society that young men should culti-
vate to complete their education in the
sterling requisites of good character, and
in the grace and ease, without which even
the best character may be neither amiable
nor attractive. The wonder is that so
many young men do not seem to appreciate
the privilege Of intercourse with their
seniors Of the other sex Even if they are
courteous, so far as the external rules Of
intercourse are considered, young men are
apt to betray, if they do not openly avow
a disinclination to remain in the society Of
ladies above their own age Young women
are wiser, and as rule seem to appre-
ciate the society Of elder gentlemen.
Young girls are most natural, and most at
ease in the company of elderly gentlemen,
and show that Difference to seniority which
makes young women more lovely and
attractive, and young men more manly and
agreeable.
And how are young men to find the
way to society so useful and desirable Z?
If young man has mother living, such
society will find him, if he does not repel
it. The mother loves her son quite as
well, if not better than any other woman
can. Mothers yearn for the society aud
the confidence of their sons. They are
lenient to their faults and proud Of what
ever claim their sons may possess to re-
spect The sons, as the world goes, seem
to take this disposition Of the mothers for
granted. Instead Of responding to it, they
treat it as matter of course, and grudg-
ingly acknowledge, if they acknowledge at
all, the debt they owe. The charge of
absolute ingratitude, or even Of actual in
difference, is not intended here to be made.
But there is, in too many cases, a negli-
gcnce of appearance, a want of positive
respect and an absence of that courtesy
which every man owes to women, and
which, generally, they are ready enough to
pay-ercept to their mothers or their
wives.
There is no more beautiful thing in
social intercourse than the courtesy of a
son whose demeanor to his mother shows
that he holds her to be as fully entitled to
the little kindnesses of life as any other
woman. Reciprocal acts of attention be-
tween young people are a sort of genteel
comedy but the polite attention of son
to his mother comes within the title to
reward under "the first commandment with
promise" 1t is more than beautiful-it is
useful. The father may have reached the
age when the courtesies of life and the
demands of society are something of
burden. But the yoman never grows too
old to appreciate attention and the mother
values more highly than the courtesy of
any other the attentions of her son. Her
husbands attentions she of course expects;
but sometimes he may need her attentions.
But here is fine, manly, strong young
fellow-all her own-whom she has watch
ed from his long frocks all the way up to
the adult coat of the latest fashion. He is
abundantly able to defend her against all
comers, to give her confidence in his
protection, and sure step in her pro-
menade. He is hers by claim that no
human being can dispute.
The young man who appreciates this
relation and who recognizes his mothers
friends as his friends, who pays to them as
ladies superior attention because of their
age, is passing througha finishing school
which cannot fail to make a gentleman of
him.