The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-08-09
ANECDOTES.

1
towns west of the Connecticut river, there
lived a queer genius of the human race
called by bis nelghbors and acquaintance
throughout the country by the name of Or
Now, W was very economical and saving
and always in fear lest some one would
cheat him, and not being overstocked with
brains, nor generally beloved by his neigh
bors, they used to try their tricks upon him
and nearly always with success. I'D
One evening, as the good people of the
village were assembled at the store, Or came
in. He was not on very good terms with
his neighbors, and some wonder was caused
by his sudden Appearance. However, nc
one expressed any surprise, and he forth
with became very laxative with the com
pany, some of whom at the time were con.
juring up something to pass off on Or.
Among those gathered, there was one
Ebenezer W, who had always been a
sore torment to poor o. Mr.. w. was very
poor. and being somewhat lazy, he some
times chose to make by his cunning out Of
others pockets what he failed to possess
So, throwing himself back in a chair, and
opening his huge mouth, for it was enor.
nous, he began: ~sl s4s re- 7l1saI
Gentlemen. I'll bet treat all round
that I've got the best COW there is in these
diggin's."
Glance after glance from every eye told
that the company were aware of some
game. f5 CO sss--rat .Err. f-iw
. "Got good cow, dye say, Mr.. W.? Do
you want tn sell her?' rF+ trrrr-->
g No, not that, OIL can't do that
must have cow"
SIS she fust rate now, Mr.. W.? thought
some one said that you were short for milk
and that yoa had to borrow of r"
"Short for milk, Or? Why come over
some time, and Ill show you something you
never saw before" .rs
Wont you sell her, Mr.. W.-won't you
sell herr" cried Or, in paroxysm of ex-
element, for he began to think she was
really something extra. .----- ...-.
q" Why, the fact is, Or, that I am very
short of money, and if you will give me fifty
dollars, I don't know but I will let you have
her." -
| "Ill run over and see her MIXED next
Saturday morning, and if she's as good as
you tell for, I'll take her." tsrtnl El
Saturday came, and Or, bright and early,
was at W.. w. had just risen. -ss-.
/ uUOu IUOTulug. NlT. w 1V6 COIu0 W
see that COW MIXED"
"Wife," cried w. as he took up the pail,
hand me that other one."
"Does it take two pals to hold her milk p
cried Or, in an ecstasy of delight.
aCome and see." ---
Or went, and 10 and behold, Mr.. W. car.
ried in two swimming pals of milk, all from
that COW.
| I'LL take her--I see it all !" and forth
with the fifty dollars were deposited in WIS
hand. All q 50 "a
Or drove the COW home, rejoicing at his
bargain. AT night he took two pals to &c
out and milk, but all he could get was hall
pail full He grew alarmed. Something
was not right, and in double quick time he
was at WIS.,
Il can't get but half pail full from that
critter, no way" said Or, as soon as he
crossed the threshold" .-..-....-.
well, L didn't very often" calmly re-
piled W.; "but | hadn't MIXED her since
night before last, and she gave great deal
more than usual this morning."
| This had terrible effect upon Or, but he
couldn't help it. He had been gammoned
and paid fifty dollars for an animal not
worth twenty. Or rannosed,. leaving w
laughing over his trick. sss y, - go
A MUSICAL ANEcDoTE.-Talking of an
organ reminds me of an old church near by
whose members, in times past, had consci-
entious scruples about this instrument, al
though they had none concerning the use Of
| band of music in sacred service. In the
cenventicIe to which refer, the trombone
was played by that famous performer, Mr..
! Perkins, distinguished for many miles
around for his lung power" On one oc-
casion the conductor was drilling his choir
on piece of music which he fondly hoped
would win great ecldt for himself and his
choir on the following Sunday evening. A
fine passage marked PIP occurred in the
piece, which would have produced an ex
quisite effect if it had been rendered with
that delcacy the leader endeavored to sug
gest and enforce in the usual manner. But
instead thereof, the trombone of Perkins
blew blast that would have taken the
walls of Jericho clean off their foundations
CONSERVATION and dismay were depicted or
the countenance of the horror-stricken con
ductor. "Mr. Perkins" said he, in a sterr
voice, "you have ruined me! What Dc
you mean by playing in that outrageoui
manner 2" Why, sir" replied Mr.. Per
kins, meekly, al played according To tn,
marks in my book " Let me see you
book sir,'' said the conductor "There. sir
is not that strain marked double D 2" Ger
tainly," said Perkins. "And pray, sir, wha
do you understand by pp?''' AS 1 un
derstood, and understand it, in this case
double D means Put in, Perkins and
did it," You did," repeated the conduc
tor, his disgust giving way to the humor 0
the thing, and he ordered a recess of hal
an hour.
| A QUEER M1sTAKE.-As matter o
course, when clergymen exchange, they
/ preach old sermons. That they may do 80
Is one of the reasons for exchanging. L
does not follow, however, that they shoulc
not look over the MS. to see if the loca
points need alteration, Weread of Som
erville (Mass) preacher, who went over late
ly to Andover to preach. In his discourse
was an allusion to the Insane Asylum al
Somerville And forgetting that he was in
Andover, he said: "Sooner. than chile, oil
mine should be subjected to such Influences
would be willing to have him confined in
wonder institution" And the good man
4 pointed directly ct the Andover Theologi.
cal Seminary.
A ST. Louis lady has lovely daughter
and takes boarderss One Of the nice young
\ men is sweet on Bella, and coming home
the other night he saw q light graceful foru
sweep past him in the hail, and heard the
seductive rustic Of crinoline. He knew that
4 form and clasped it to his heart, mpfintine
impassioned kisses on its lips. he dropped
it, when he heard these words :: g Hurry
up, Massa George, Use got to hurry aftel
soft SOAP"