American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1873-02-01
GENERAL ITEMS.


have very pekOeliar flavor.
If the burglars carry off your plate,
why is it all right? Because IT'S not left.
NEBRASKA talks of cultivating oysters
in the vicinity of its salt springs.
NEVER laugh at a man with a pug nose;
you don't know what may turn up.
WHEN a mans necktie is united, how
untidy he looks!
WYOMING objects to being Wyomingled
with the adjoining Territories.
THE shadowy future, with its gloomy
phantOms, never comes.
THE SISTERS of Silence is a valuable
Michigan association of women.
Why is the letter Y like young lady
Because it makes pa pay.
'LAsT sENE OF ALL"-kerO-sene. which
has ended 137 strange eventful histories
during the past year.
WHY is a humming-top unlike drill of
potatoes? One is a rOtater, and the
other tater row.
A LITTLE girl at Dubuque amended the
Lords Prayer by asking for ''her daily
Gingerbread
In wordy combat between two social
equals, the best dressed man has one point
in his favor.
"THE Pacific SLoPE."-The Quaker
Peace Commissioners running from the
Indians.
FRANCE and Germany are not going to
beat each other any more, but both are
going in to beet-sugar tremendously.
SHAKESPEARE understood mothers-in-
law: he makes all of Othello's troubles
come from his wife's mother.
GOVERN the child by gentleness even
the camel moves not swifter before the
whip than behind the flute.
WHAT do you expect to see reflected in
your inamOrata's eyes? Yourself, if she
is good looking-lass.
A FLORIDA Temperance society has de-
cided that egg-nogg 'sis not beverage -
Perhaps because they eat it before they
drink II.
PRUDENT CalifOrnians nowadays get a
preliminary certificate of insanity from
their family physicians before they kill
anybody.
A WEEK or two back the horses were
laid up with influenza. Now, in many
places, they are laid up again. But it's
snow disease this time.
IT IS stated as Neurological fact that
the milk of young COW is apt to be foam
ing. Which is highly probable, as the
creature is naturally heifervescent.
PENNSYLVANIA naturalists can't under
stand how there can be 50 many rats in
the coal mines when they have so much
trap there.
WHY will nautical correspondents per-
sist in speaking of the waves ''raking'
their gallant craft when every chemical
student knows that waters HO?
THE astronomers at Kew are preparing
to crafty their Kewriosity concerning
next years transit of Venus, which is ex-
pected to be explanatory of planetary dis
tances.
If the man who has got to the top of
the hill by honesty is ashamed to turn
about and look at the lowlv road he h as
Travelled, he deserves to be taken by the
neck and hurled to the bottom again.
TEACH your frail girl that, thOsgh she
may find pleasure in the gallant support
OF a brothers arm, his care should in no
way cripple her energies, or rob her of her
birthright, wOmanhoOd.
BRITISH psychologists have announced
that recently deciphered cuneiform de-
scription of the Noachian deluge is at
least thirty five centuries old, bat Mrs.
Camp thinks this is one of the delugions
which scholars are always falling into.
A FOREIGN correspondent writes admir-
lngiy of the {. brown hare legs" of the
Spanish peasantry. This is sOmethin ITO
be pondered by Mr.. Darwin, who no.
where alludes to the brown bear in ex-
planning mans origin.
To FIND one who has passed through
life without sorrow, you must find one in
capable of love or hatred, of hope or fear
one that hath no memory of the past
and no thought of the future-one that
hath no sympathy with humanity and no
feeling in common with the rest of the
species.
A PARIS correspondent argues that a
married woman on the stage exercises less
magnetism over an audience than a sim
gle woman does; that the fact that she
belongs to another; that her brightest
giances, sweetest dimples, and most mu
s!ca! tones are for him, uncnnsciously di-
minished her influence; and states in IL
lustratiOn that there were offered In Paris
what were called Christine Nilsson watch
es, which had great sale, but when she
took a husband their demand so sensibIv
their name.