, 1873-01-26
HUEIOR.

GaE-fn.
Tho difference between true and false doc
trine is often only the width Of hair. see.
And yet, the falso doctrine ia the heresy.
Dennis O'shaughnessy advertlaes as follows
in the Columbus Republican: II hereby give
notice that my wife Bridget has left my bed and
board, and that will not pay her debts, as NO
arc not married"
Incredible ns it may seem, many Of tho rich
est planters in Jamaica lire on coffee grounds.
-'Mrs. Jenhs," said little red-headed girl
will you obleege her by lendin' her b stick OF
ire-wood-dll this cruet with vinegar-puttin' 3
little soft-sonp in this pan-and pleaso not let
your turkoy-gobble1s roost on our fence"
Mrs. Partington wants to know why some OF
the sewing -machinp advertisers do not call their
machines the Ceres. Her nephew, who ia 1earn-
ing the heather misogyny, tells her that Ceres
first taught sowing.
Young indies who lace themselves too
tightly when dressing for dinner evidently pre-
he's: The same is truo Of their rosposs. aain me
ing Of cheese and cheating Of he's
Woman was made from rib-bone-she
loYes rib-bon{e)s to this day. .:
"A romping 4-year-old boy had been denied
some triaing Qualification by his mother, but it
did not seem SO trihiug to lin AZ to her. So,
striking an attitude before her, he said with tho
ptmost' , q, gravity, ''Mother, we're you ever
The Chinese have an apho1ism very similar
to our IS Man proposes, but God dsposes." It
is: ''Jen sch"o, soo-tre! soo-tre! 1icn-
schwo, wei~jau! wei-jaul "11an says, sol SO!
Heaven says, no! mol"
Rezolushuns for 1873," "That wont advise
emmy body, until i kno tho kind or advice they
are anxious tew follow"
"A rural gentleman, standing over rnglster
in Daubury store, attracted general attention
/ guess I'm going to Lave q fever; L feel such
hot 6tfeaka AruQQ n up NV legs
The patron Of o cheap oating-hoCse, wko
complained that they gave only one potato with
was mo1lifed By the walters explanation that
tho last lot Of potatoes they purchased waB GO
bad that no gentleman could est more than ono
Of them.
-Judge-1 fine Tim Larry e5 for assault and
battery on Pat Malone Pat-Dut, your Honor,
want more damages. He blackcd mo eye, aud
it had been invited to q toa-parsy couidn's
have gone. Judge-The Court knows nothing
about consequential damages. You must carry
your case to Geneva.
hanged, but al the carpenters in the ncighho:-
hood refused to build the scaffold. as tho con-
demned man WAS himself . carpenter by trade.
the 1heriff tried to induce him to pnt up the gal
lows, but ho steadfastly declared lo'd be hanged
it he did.
"A sanguine young Atchisoninn Ind faith in
his ability to make himself tho receptacle cl
four pinta Of raw wlliskey within fifteen min
Y]fA AA
sIeat,, Iter ~ fRo Ia;ehborl,ooj eb md mado y
the acena ~ fhe ncrfora
T1r,n., lie lie oaat and ornomcntcd tonhntona. now
1pon ns het M .u III, o inscr;in tI,n aim,
=. paosesa u ~ srd,ad w. and NJ Hal AA'
Ply 9psapl T. .om ois .ta, -. ;r,5;a,,,+1r asod
Hnas W sou ,s. sau raat.,,nt 1aini;,,t. ]u.
~ atnat that he 1ad discnrere n liz nlste ~
S. - W-isthsnd 1a,s 1ztb s1aorns attached
1 aasn s1n a;tar hr;stv aWe1i do IN
5a.u .,at ,,,.a1 thna tor nan ~ INA in
~ ,,aa, y, satoA ,ho enstnrner in 1rret?,
= Cod o haavons s,r !" cT;a5 tho wa;ter ..wouI
ron ornect ct to Ind a1o silk umbrella in q IL
{aanscant niata ~ i,aah ~
Tba nnnhury r Necs oivea m acconnt of- Tho
r;c;.s;tudaa ~ ia "a o9nerionce5 hy n vonnv
=; .et ]1.na q ,xart tns ro,'n
usan ~ IN. paaIa no W.. ~ oa'. ','
previously last n1ss ueen ~ n h ta
a. nn ~ ~ ~ sta ,e anI naiied lin se1In c1d
~ w ta,a s,a+n ~ ~ ~
xees ,. ~ ~ ~ @ rU,o ~" ,I t1,i,,t;,a 10
"a oo..att,;,a n{acaj h;a hnnd ae1iy m ,;s
a,1da t1',n III! ro,,n3 cn11 tlcd fh ansro
r,naar FL, ooststaI x;tt 1c.tFcr Tha vnn.v
NAM don't % 90 there anv mora he says sn:alI
Nv ia heradt.rv IN the family.
-Dr. W;Iiet' lectnrinu in Boston tho othcs
npht told iroll story Of himeelf. He gaid
thst at one time. when be was cornoisscur IL