Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1873-08-26

with holy zeal to thank tho immortal gods
ssoshessats up and wrote a poem on the sqni1ay
fthe heavens. entitled, he 1f,ll:y
The poets piace, in the field, had to be flied
theyzchose the liumorist.
Bill Shakespeare says, There's many a
man hath more Hair than aciss !" Now, this
statenentma be true, with regard to the com
mon herd of Immunity; but not so in this
shumorist case. His wit was proiuse-but
hadn't any more hair on his head thanis gem
orally found on the head of Z. ettle>drum.-:
u speak thus about the humorist's head to
prove that Shakespeare didn't write the; truth
at all times, even if he, has given us play I
called. "Three Eyed Dick. !" This jolly son
of Menus was as unfortunate MS his brother
of the MUSES.. a ball came from the bat
with terrific force against the end of his
thumb. which caused him to disregard all the
rules of etiquette, even the commonest die
tates Of good breeding, for he thrust the
broken thumb into his mouth, commenced
gnawing a. it like a dog at bone; then pro-
ceeded to entertain the players with lively
Fiji Island dance, until fairly exhausted, he
rolled over and over on the grass, printing
beautiful green landscape on,the back of his,
duster. A!great many of his co-laborers in
the field of literature aud baseball, knew not
thumb only ultimately a young Ore Bull
diluvian violin, undertook to probe for the
balm the humorist's mouth-with the
crooked end of cane. Tie found that ball.
too, twenty>one feet off, lying in the grass!
l babe the party ga farewell" but showed
my thanks, by conveying to farm house the
pail which had been borrowed to hold the
butter>milk. handed the pail to dairy
maid, who inquired why that fat man (mean.
ing the humorist,) had been dancing with
creased dinner plate on his head. told her
she had seen the bald>hcad of distinguished
scholar. Poor girl! she blushcd as red as an
auctioneer's flag. On my way home, I saw an
old building in which George Washington is
said to have slept. It is preserved with every
mark of renerstion by the faculty of the Col
lego. While riding to the city my thoughts
often travelled back to the scene of my um>
brella's departure because the man from
whom I borrowed it can kick like mule
But was not less fortunate than man whom
| know in the city of New York. He's
doctor, and man who likes good dogs about
as we'll as. he does good paying patients. Two
weeks ago-one dark, rainy night-he took
his little poodle and big, silk umbrella, and
started to see patient. Now, this doctor is,
very considerate man ;-hc wouldn't take
his umbrella into the house, so lie placed the
little poodle near lamp most. on the street.
with the understandable in the faithful
animals mouth; of course, he fastened the
poodle to the lamp. post, to prevent his run
ming home. In few minutes big Tom cat
came along and got to wrestling "collar and
elbow" with the dog. The cat held on to the
poodle, the poodle held on to The umbrella
aud lamp post, until terrible blast of wind
opening the umbrella carried cat, dog and all
into the sky. The ca. mewed in delicious
falsetto, the dog joined the chorus with
decp>sounding basso, while the wind whistled
through the hollow end of tho lamp>post.-
People rushed to the windows, on beholding
the light Gin the lamp>post) passing through
the heavens, at the rate of forty knots an
hour. One man guessed it was ga comet"
because it had tail. Ho saw the dogs tail.
But the poodle settled the dispute by an awful
bark, which convinced all that the phcuom>
enon was nothing more than dog star gliding
through ethereal space. The doctors studye
ing astronomy now, perhaps he'll find out
what part of the heavens his noodle inhabits.
EX>HARPER's FERnIAN.