St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1873-09-19
Sayings and Doings.

y boy at New York. while asleep on
the root of six story house. fell of and
WAS almost instantly killed.
\ Danbury boy wants to know if it
is right for his folks To pay 800 for Il
piano for his sister and make him pick
berries for circus DdnbHrW
NcW$
\ gentleman who takes Il business
view of most things. when recently
asked respecting a person of quite -
poetic temperament. replied : Oh. he
is one of those men who have soaring,
after the infinite and divingS after the
untathomal'lr. hut who never pay cash.
\ poor little rhurch-goer asked his
mother where the cattle with Il thou
sand tails" lived. "Cattle with thou
sand tails. child :" exclaimed the as
toniShed parent. there are no such
things. YES. there are. returned
the boy "the minister said the cattle
with Il thousand tails were the Lords -
y Sioux City lady went int" Il gallery
for her picture. After putting her i'll
position. the artist put the plate in tho.
camera. and told her to look at Il certain
spot on the wall. She wasn't certain of
seeing it well from where she sat. and
81 got up and went over to it. but
failed to discover anything about it.
y man in PENNSYLVANIA has invented
Il rat trap that is made to operate upon
the selfish passions of the poor rat. and
lure him into trouble. y mirror is sci
in the back part of the device. beyond
the bait. and H. his rat>hip is ont on u
toraging expedition he c>pics the bait ::
at the same time believes his own image
in the mirror tn he another rat making
for ii on the opposite side. This Is to"
much for rat nature To stand and he
cool over. 81 he ruSheS for the bait and
is caught.
\ middle-agcd lady met bridSh-
looking lady in the poSt-otfice. yestcr-
day. and the following conversation
followed MARY. is it true that your
mother is dead p asked the former
1T is said Mary. And werc yo,
married before She died - No" said
May. mot until three days after" The,
middle-agcd woman stared at the bride
for Il moment. ana then slowly and he
Wildering said : do You mean To SAY
that youI poor mother died without
without seeing what you were married
in !"-DdnbWy NeWs.
Om Teutonic friend Johannes Davis
entered one of our drug stores and thus
addressed the clerk ''ToctOr. | feel
sig all Offer, und de herbleS dclts me
better take one ti<Sick." "All right
SiI." says the clerk. .'Will YOU have Il
dose of salts or some purgativc pills p
We'll. vot it cost for dem saulds p
Ten cents. sir" lind how much for
dem tiSSicking pill p III give YOU .
dose at the same price After Il vain
search III his pocket for the required
sum. he asked "Toctor. yOu toud goj
no secondhand tissicking pills. ain'f
you y
A PAT REJOINDER.-AtO Oxford. some
twenty Years ago, Il tutor of one of the
colleges limped i'll his walk. Stopping
one day last summer AT Il railway sta
tinn. he waS accosted 10y Il wcll-knoWn
politician, who recognized him, and
asked him if he was not the chaplain ot
-Collegc at such time. namin.
the year. The doctor replied that he
was.
II was there" said the interrogation.
WELL" said the doctor. lit seems my
limping made deeper impression than
my preaching.
An, doctor. WAS the reply. with
ready wit. ''iI is the highest compliment
we can pay IL minister to say that he i
known by his walk rather than 10y hi~
CASE OF CONSEQUENTLY D,u,fES
When father stands Oh his head in til
corner to please the children. he cannot
he too careful. An Astoria parent WI
his little ones that way las
Friday, when the door bell rang. Hi
wife who had been leaning out of the
story window talking servant
girl to the lady next door. rushed d"wr
stairs and into the parlOr to tell him
company was coming. Papa was resi-
ING both heels at that moment against
he wall. and i'll the hurry and agitation |
Of recovering himself, his legs flew /.
about so thoughtleSsly that one bo"i |
struck his wife in the mouth and knock /
-d out seven or eight front teeth. She |
tainted. and in falling .
Dverthrew the youngest boy and broke
-hree of his ribs. \ large maStitf i'll the .
'front.' yard, hearing the commotion, nat
lrally attributed tin his blind. IRA
IOnal, canine way-tO the strangers at
he door. upon whom he at once made
4 violent attack, mangling silk drcs,
n the most shocking manner, and eX
racting several choice tendons from the
legs. The bills for new