The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1873-04-18
onsrRvAT1oSs ISTHE MErRopoL1s.

OBSERVATIONS IN THE METROPOLIS.
Since the last Issue of this paper the
chief propeller of its goose-quill has
spent a few days in Portland, and per-
haps our readers wouldn't mind taking
a birds-eye squint at the prodigious
metropolis through our spectacles.
OF course we are too merciful to in
Aict upon the long suffering public a
description of Portland-one massa-
ere of innocent people is enough in one
week. Suffice that it is situated about
six miles below Milwaukee and some
ten or twelve above Springville, and
makes pretty fair-sized sandwich be-
tween these two cities. 1t isn't necess-
AIRY to describe the leading incidents OF
our arrival in Portland-all our read
ers who have ever been there know
what the stereotyped reception of the
hospitable metropolitan is. 1t con-
sists of five questions, viz: "How are
YEP" "Whend'ye come DOWN."
"How long'll you stay?" "Where We
stopping?" ''Take a drink?' These
five interrogatories are put to you in a
swift monotone by people who seem
to be stationed at proper intervals, by
some city regulation, for that specific
purpose. 1t isn't expected that you
will answer any of these questions.
You merely slacken your pace when
the antomaton slides out the sentences,
and then pass on to the next corner
where another interrogation mark
stands and recites his one-side cate
chism as you pass. We presume this
is one of the peculiar institutions OF
the city, kept up at the expense of the
municipality, for the purpose of DEM
onstrating its hospitality to the stran-
ger within its gates. The fellow who
invented the system ought to be COM
PEELED to make one round on the beat
of these automatic questioners, and
then have monument erected to his
memory, appropriately inscribed,
'Died of too much hospitality"
Portland has a Central Ma rket in one
end of the town and street cars ira
versing one street. This central mar
ket embraces pie and peanut stand,
surmoupted by flower pot of jimpson
weed and dogfennel, and seems to be
well patronized by the scattered in
habitants in its neighborhood. Why
it is called Central Market-being To-
Gated in the extreme northern part of
the municipal limits-remains mys-
terry with US even unto this day. The
street cars we believe only run one
way-at least that was the result of
our observation. They run from the
top of Fourth Street, at the south end
of the city, down past the Central
peanut stand to frog pond from
which all the frogs have been forcibly
weaned by the sterility of the water.
Fourth Street is an inclined plane,
with a slant of about IS degrees, and
of course the single horse who holds
the car back while going down hill
couldn't possibly pull it up again. He
presume they keep the starting point
at the top of the hill supplied with
cars by ferrying them up the river on
Holladay's fiat-boats. They must get
them up there some way, be-
cause they have one to shoot down the
plane about every half hour. We did
not learn what they were used for.
East Portland, across the river from
West Portland, has no Central Mar
ket nor street cars, but contains within
its corporate limits some excellent
farms. We noticed one field of about so
acres, in Rolladay's addition, in about
the center of the city, which was be-
ing sown to wheat, and we have sell
dom seen ground in better condition.
Mr.. Holladay himself was not at work
in the field when we passed, but a
couple of the boys seemed to be doing
good work. The farmers of East Port
land confidently expect to produce
sufficient cereals for home consump-
tion, this year, if the season continues
favorable, and have nearly ship load
for export Our earnest advice to
them to form a farmers club was
looked upon with much favor, and we
confidently expect their delegates to
put in an appearance at the June
meeting of the Farmers State Conven-
tion.