The weekly Shasta courier., 1873-11-01
ANECDOTES.

good bargain, was very ill, and friends
were expecting an early demise. His neph-
ew and man hired Tor the occasion had
butchered steer which had been fattened
and when the job was completed the nephew
entered the sick room, where few friends
were assembled, when, to the astonishment
OF all, the old man opened his eyes, and
turning his head slightly, said, in full
voice, drawing out the words:
"What have you been doing?"
s"killing the steer,D was the reply.
"What did you do with the hide?D
"Left it in the barn; going to sell it by
and-by." ....-
Let the boys drag it around the yard a
couple of times; it will make it weigh heav-
er.
And the good man was gathered unto his
fathers. l.
A HAPPY MAN-Inquisitive lady-"Who,
may ask, are those tall ladies singing?'
Communicative stranger The Miss
Bderbogies"
1nquisitive lady-"They seem rather re-
markable personsp'
Communicative estranger-"Quite so. b.
all who are so favored as to possess the
privilege OF their acquaintance, they are
with justice admitted to be morally, phys
icaly and Intellectually perfect"
lnqrisitive lady--'Dear me! And the la
dy at the piano?' -.s. -ss
Communicative stranger-'She was also
Miss Bliderbogy. Indeed, she was by far
the most transcendently gifted of them all?"
Inquisitive lady-"Dear me! Then she
is no longer?"
Communicative stranger-"On the con-
trary, marriage has improved her."
Inquisitive lady-"Go gracious And
whom did she marry, pray?'
| Communicative stranger-aMe"
Nor READY TO DIE.-The following is
no fabrication of an irreverent secular Jour
nal, but from the orthodox Memphis Pres
6yterian: Travelling in his buggy alone, not
long ago, in going to one of his appoint
ments, one of our good brethren in the
Presbytery of Memphis overlook a foot
pad with his petbag in hand The
roads We're muddy, and he was just at the
| time about entering mlry bottom. With
the politeness for which he is noted, he
asked the pedestrian-an entire stranger
If he would not take a seat in his buggy
until at least, they had crossed the mud and
the mlre. The invitation was accepted,
and the conversation for time was free
and easy, about things ordinary and general
Presently, hover, the good brother, with a
view to make the conversation profitable
asked the stranger if he was ready to die
Not knowing the character of the person
who had invited him to seat with him, and
misapprehending his meaning and suspect
ing foul play, he waited not to reply, but
sprang from the buggy Immediately, and
ran for life through slush and water. The
clerical brother, wishing to assure the stran-
ger that he meant no harm, called to him
at the top of his voice, to stop. But this
only fastened his speed, and like scared
hare, he ran until beyond hearing and sight
In his hasty flight he left his carpet sack,
which our brother now has in his posses
sion, being the richer for his faithfuness by
the addition of coarse shirt, pair of
threadbare trousers, and little hacker"
A MAGIc!AN's JOKE ON LANDLORD
short time since Martino the magician and
vetriloquist, came to Quincy, ILL.,, to COM
mence series of entertainments in that
city.
On arriving at the hotel he inquired of
the landlord if he could have lodgings for
the night. Our worthy host, being a Jolly
fellow, quickly replied, Y ou can have doz-
en- if you choose, as there have been no
other arrivals tonight"
Taking lamp in his hand, and followed
by Martino, the landlord started upstairs
to give MARITIME the choice of half dozen
vacant rooms. As the landlord proceeded
to unlock the first room voice from within
cried out, "What do you want in here?"
The landlord apologized for the intrusion.
and passed on to the next room, when a
voice from the inside cried out, "Go away
J from here, or Ill blow your brains out. -
, They passed on to third room, and were
just unlocking the door, when child COM
menced crying, with the father and mother
trying to comfort it. The landlord began
to look confounded, but still passed on from
room to room, and every one seemed to be
occupied by either Irish, German, French,
or some other foreigners. The landlord
being an old bachelor, had selected one of
the choicest rooms in the hotel for himself,
= Finding all his rooms occupied, he said:
my dear sir, shall have to give you nv
room to night, as the others seem to be oc-
cupied." On arriving at the door, lady
! from within cried out, "Go away from here,
who ever you are. The landlord gave me
this room for the night, and do not wish
to be meddled with. Beside, am mar
ried woman, travelling for my health, and
do not wish to be disturbed, especially at
f this late hour"
t The landlord, finding all his rooms occu-
i pied, quickly set the lamp down, with the
remark, would like to know how it is that
my hotel is full of travellers and no names
| appear on the register" After amusing
n himself for some time at the old mans ex-
pense, Martino informed him that there was
/, no one in the rooms, and that he was the
> gentleman that was to commence an en-
gagement in the opera house in that city the
!, next week. He remarked to the old man
e that he had been out of practice for some
:. time, and was merely testing his ventrilo-
: quial powers. The landlord, on finding out
e his visitor, quickly said: "Mr. Martino, you
o can have the best room in the house during
your stay" He says the next time ven.
= triloquist stops at his hotel, he will give
q him the keys and let him select his own
? room.-Quincy (Iu) Herald.
Reverence the highest, have patience
with the lowest Let this days perform
r ance of the meanest duty be thy religion
|, Are the stars too distant, pick up the peb
BILE that lies at thy feet and from it learn