The Fremont weekly journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County, Ohio) 1867-1877, 1873-06-13
Girls.

@ Girls.
Girls are marvels of beauty and
wonderfully made. Though fash
.ioned by the hands of the Creator
they are shaped by the dressmakers
and milliners. It takes exactly two
hundred and eleven pounds of flesh
and blood, thirty two yards of dress
material, ninety seven yards of yel-
low ribbon, twelve pounds of cotton,
twenty four copies ofthe Coach, six
teen feet of hair, thirty three
ounces of -four, two boxes OF red
paint, and 4 bottle of night-bloom-
ing seriousness to prepare the aver
age Rock Mountain girl for church.
They know less in an hour, and7ean
tellmore in a minute than any other
person on eartt. Theil strong suit
is toamake trouble and bustles, and
the proficiency they have acquired is
the 7conundFpm of the age In a
game oftalk they invariably hold the
right bower or take the ace with the
king. They are totally ignorant OF
the rules of civilized warfare, and
never let mp when they get fellow
down, A girl can look pretty and
ugly, happy and sorowfal, hot and
cold, sweet and sour, sentimental
and disgusted in ten seconds, and
the only place in the world where
the boys have the best of them is in
sitting up of nights. Yet with ali
their faults we love them still, and q
few more ofuour photographs may
be had by addressing the Diver and
inclosing fifty cents. Marriage pro
posals must be prepaid. The (Co9.
Coach. ,..gr5 ,a--ogs r.y .,,
A Butler county, Penn, girl has
twentyone lovers, and yet she never
saw steamboat or railway.
Ayoung husband handed his wife
a dozen buttons the other day, and
asked her to put shirt to them.
Agassiz says that the evening
hours are the best for sleep. They
are also the best for sitting up with
= nice girl.
The similarity between a female
parson and a mutton thief consists
in the fact that they are both sheep
reachers. 70 if-s. af s'a-f
If your wife does abuse you, you
have the consolation that she will
not permit any one else to do SO.
A Philadelphia belle has beer
counting her fans, and she finds she
has six hundred and five, all present
ed by her admirers. 's
According to the way Iowa biga
mists are sentenced, you can marry
six women and only go up for five
years. But then they are Iowa Ro
men. 7Lt -,-l.
A waterfall 1000 feet high, ol
more than twelve times the hight ol
Niagara has been discoyed in British
Guiana The lady's nameais moi
given. s5n7- 3a esI1 ati.z. irff -I s-
Emma A. Dodge almost despairc
of her sex because women cannot
express their wishes in concise, ac.
curate and business-like forms hal
as easily as men.
That farmer understood human
nature who said: "If you want
your boy to stay at home don't bear
too hard on the grindstone when he
turns the crank. ,fu
The heaviest brain on record was
recently found in the skull of q
London bricklayer, who could neith-
er read nor write. It's weight was
sixty y-seven ounces.
A western paper itemizes briefly
thus: Mrs. John Bagg of Omaha
has left Mr.. John Bagg, taking the
money bags, and leaving John to
hold the little empty Baggs." a
1t cost a Milwaukee lady 5000 to
take her three children to see "The
Fire Waif," played at matinee, for
the juveniles the next day reproduc-
cd the drama in the parlor. No in
surance. sraF
A Baltimore lightning-rod man
fell from the roofOf a five story build
ing in that city last week, and struck
on top of an old gentleman. Both
were rendered insensibIe, and before
the old man had recovered his feet,
the agent had taken his order for a
rod. - aa BAL
A lady travelling In Europe writes i:
"A German professors wife will ap-
pear at ease in her wedding dress
fifteen or twenty years old, entertain
you in your own language, while
you sit perfectly ignorant of the Ian
guage of the country where you are
visiting"
A Western contemporary gives
the following names of gentlemen
composing the school board OF that
dIstinctively American city, Milwau-
kee: "Hundhausen, Kuenzle, Was
weller, Zeigler, Schnurstein, Frei-
d.