The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1873-09-23

IRhlNG AN ENPERIMENT.-tic came IL
with an interrogation point in one eye
and stick in one hand. One eye was
covered with handkerchief and one arm
in sling His bearing was that of a
man with settled purpose in view.
want to see, says he, the man that
puts things into this paper.
We intimatcd that several Of us earned
frugal livelihood in that way.
Well, | want to see the man that cribs
things out of the other papers.
We explained to him that there were
seasons when the most gifted among us,
driven to frenzy by the scarcity of ideas
and events, and by the clamorous demand
OF an Unsuitable people, in moments Of
emotional insanity plunged the glittcring
shears into our exchanges. He went of
calmly, but in voice tremulous with
suppressed feelings and indistinct through
the recent loss OF half dozen or so Of
his front teeth
Just SO. presume 80. l don't know
much about this business. but | want to
see him, the man that printed that little
piece about pouring cold water down a
drunken mans spine of his back, and
making him instantly sober. If you
please want to see that man. would
like to talk with him.
Then he leaned his stick against our
desk aud moistened his scrvceable hand,
and resumed his hold on the stick as
though he was weighing it. After study
ing the stick a minute, he added, in q
somewhat louder tone;
Mister, [ came here to see that ere
man. L want to see him bad.
We told him that particular man was
not in.
Just SO. L presume so. They told
me before | came that the man | wanted
to see wouldn't be anywhere. Ill wait
for him. | live up north, and I've
walked seven miles to converse with that
man. | guess I'll sit down and wait.
He sat down by the door and reflect
lively pounded the floor with his stick
but his feelings would not allow him to
keep still.
suppose none Of you didn't ever pour
much cold water down any drunken mans
back to make him instantly sober, per.
haps?
None Of US in the Office had ever tried
the experiment.
Just SO. thought just as ike as not
you had not. Well. mister, | have. /
tried it yesterday, aud | have come seven
miles on foot to sec the man that printed
that piece. 1t wasn't much of a piece,
l don't think but l want to see the man
that printed it, Just few minutes. You
see John Smith, he lives next door to my
house, when I'm to home, and he gets
how-come-you.so every little period,
Now, when he's sober, he's all right if
you keep out Of his way; but when he's
drunk he goes home and breaks dishes
and tips over the stove, aud throws the
hardware around, and makes it inconven-
lent for his wife, and sometimes he gets
his gun and goes out calling on bis neigh.
hors, and it amt pleasant.
Not that | want to say anything about
Smith; but me aud my wife don't think
lie ought to do so. He came home ves-
tcrday. aud broke all the kitchen win.
dows out Of the house. and followed his
wife around with the carving knife, talk.
iug about her liver, and after while he
lay down by my fence aud went to sleep.
had been reading that little piece > it
wasn't much Of a piece, and | thought if
| could pour some water down his spine,
on his back, and make him sober,it would
be more comfortable for his wife, and a
square thing all round. So L poured a
bucket OF spring water down John Smiths
spine of his back.
Well, said we, as our visitor paused,
did it make him sober? Our visitor
took frmer hold Of his stick and replied
with increased emotion
just SO. presume it did make him
as sober as a judge in less time than YOU
could say Jack Robinson but, mister, it
made him mad. 1t made him the mad.
dest man ever saw; and Mr.. John
Smitb is u bigger mau than me and stout.
er. Dlc-bless him, | never knew he
was half so stout till yesterday, and he's
the handiest man with his fists | ever
saw.
Then he wcnt for you, did he We
asked inuocently.
Just SO. Exactly. suppose he went
for me about the best he knew, but |
don't hold no grudgc against John Smith.
suppose he amt good man to hold a
grudgc against, only | want to see that
man what printed that little piece and
want to see him bad. | feel as though
it would soothe me to see that man.
want to show him how drunken man
acts when you pour water down the spine
OF his back. That's what | come for.
Our visitor, who had poured waite,
down the spine Of a drunken mans back
remained until about six o'clock in the
evening, and then went up street to find
the man that printed that little piece
The man he is looking for started fol-
Alaska last evening for a summer vaca
ton, and will not be back before Septem
Der, lS7S.-Utica Herald.
A Louisville paper furnishes the fol