Litchfield enquirer., 1873-09-04


 the Society, to which they will be requir- ed by the Executive Committed, strictly to conform.
 s. B. JOHNSON, Secretary.
 CLIPPINGS. What is that which no one wishes to have and no one wishes to lose? A bald head.
 A town in Minnesota has subscribed $500 towards the establishment of Q faro bank.
 An exchange wonders why the college oarsmen are liable to boils. Probably on account of their stewdious habits.
 An Indian Sunday School man writes to Bible firm in New York, ,-'Send me some Sunday school papers and books. Let the books be about pirates and Indi- ans as far as possible
 ''Why," asked governess to her little charge, ''do we pray God to give us our daily breadS Why don't we ask for four days, or five days, or week?" ''We want 1t fresh" replied the ingenious child.
 A schoolboy being asked by his teach CT of what the German Diet was constitu- ted, replied, ''Sauerkrout, schnapps, lager bier and mix-cum-rous," That lad must be cousin german to the boy who, when shown picture of Luther, at the Diet of Worms. said, "Papa, I see Luther, but where are the worms?'
 "Why do they call the people that live Tn some of the South Sea islands canni- balsy' asked an old man of sailor. ''Be- cause they live on other people," answer ed the sailor. ''Then," said the old man. pensively, 'my sons-in-law must be can ihals."
 BEING DANCED UPoN.-Lord Houghton, in his sketch of Lady Ashburton, one of the brighest women of her day, with a fine dash of sarcasm in her chat, says: ''Many who would not have cared for a quiet defeat shrank from the merriment of victory. I remember one of them say ing, T do not mind being knocked down, but l can't stand being danced upon af- forwards"
 COURTEOUS VERD1oTs. coroner's iury impaneled to ascertain the cause of the death of notorious drunkard, brought ln verdict of Death by hanging-around 8 rum shop" In California a coroner's jury, under similar circumstances, ren- dered a more courteous virdict sAcci dental death while unpacking glass.
 LADY OF THE HOUSE. ''Well M1llicent how do you like your new horse, 'Ro- land'"
 MnLIcENT. "Oh, immensely But he wants firm hand, you know. He'd very soon run away with me, if gave him a chance; wouldn't he, Robert?"
 ROBERT (t7rst cousin to Millice1at). 'Run away with you, if you gave him chance? If I can judge of Roland's feelings by my own, / should just tbink he sOoutd!"
 An elderly gentleman named Pinkney, living in Bedding Ridge, we believe, while going to the depot in Danbury, last evening, stepped on peach pit in front of the post-ofice, and sat down on the pavement with shocking violence. Sever al people ran to his aid, and one of them asked him if he had hurt his spine. "Heaven only knows, " feebly gasped the sufferer; "Look in my hat and see. ID. Netgs.
 At Oxford, some twenty years ago, a tutor of one of the colleges hmped in his walk: Stopping one day last summer at a railway station, he was accosted by 8 well-knOwn politician, who recognized him, and asked him if he was not chap lain of - College at such 8 time, nam- ing the year. The doctor replied that he was,
 ''I was there," said the interrogator, and knew you by your limp"
 sSWa11 g soi6 fho dookor GGiI oaa,,oc x,o~v hmping made a deeper impression than my preaching
 ""Ah doctor," was the reply, with ready wit, Git is the highest compliment we can pay minister to say that he is known by his walk rather than byhis con- versation."
 A lady called upon celebrated physi- elan to consult him about her eyes, which were giving her some trouble. The doc tor saw that she was lady of rank and wealth. He gravely shook his head; fear ed amaurosis; case would require time, and as she was living in the country, she must move to the city where he could see her daily. The lady moved to the city; the physician attended her regularly; but days changed to weeks, and weeks to months, and the cure came not. The pa- tient resolved to try an experiment. She disguised herself as poor old woman, and went to her physician. After long waiting in the anteroom, at last her turn came.
 ''Well, my good woman, what have you to complain of2"
 ''Very had eyes. doctor," she answer ed. a<a -ss He took her to the light, looked into her eyes, but failed to recognize his patient. Shruging his shoulders, he said l.:
 tsYou eyes are well enough" ~ --s
 "Well?" she said. a
 'sYes; know what I am saying"
 "But have been told that was get ting the a-a-forgot how 1t is called"
 s'Amaurosis ?' zssTa
 sfYes, that ia it, doctor"s
 'tDonT you let them make you believe any such nonsense Your eyes are a lit tie weak, but that is all. Your physician is an asst
 "An-" ''Yes. an asst Tell him boldly that I say so'
 The lady arose, and in her customary voice said, ''Sir, you are my physician. Don't you know me?'' .e.sa-ass 7
 Gracious, madamep he commenced, but the lady would not listen to him, and left indignantly. She never saw the gem tleman any more. as
 Boys shouldn't steal berries, but the owner of the field is unwise who resorts to shot gun when they do. Mir. Flagg, of Berlin, Massachusetts, has settled for peppering an encroaching boy from Clin- to1, Inv r,ayinor his fatheF S300 for dam ages, with cost of the suit.
 NIT. Joseph D. Strong, IT., of San Fran cisco, son of the Rev. J. D. Strong. an old resident of Granby, has just received the