Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1873-09-25
The Danbury Dairynian.

Z
ne BUYS A cow TO MILK, A cHURS TO
MAKE BUTTER, AND TRIES HIS HAND.
The man across the way, who enjoyed
vegetables fresh from his own garden
through the summer, has bought a COW.
His wife told him how nice Il would be
to have a cow on the prerniees, so az to
have milk fresh and pure every day, a.
ways In time and in abundance. Then
they could make butter themselves. and
not eat the rank stuff out of the store.
She told him there was enough stuff
from the garden and table to almost
keep the cow, and the product would be
almost clear gain. He figured it up
himself with pencil, and the result
surprised him. He wondered why he
had not kept COW before, and inwarily
condemned himself for the loss he had
been inflicting upon himself Then he
bought a cow. In the evening of its
arrival he went out to milk IT,
But the animal was excited by the
strange surroundings, and stepped on
our friend and kicked over his pail, and
nearly knocked one of his eyes out with
her tail. He worked at the experiment
for an hour, but without success. Then
his wife came out to give advice, and his
son came out to see the fun The cow
put one of her heels through the wOman's
dress, and knocked the boy down In the
mud, which ended their interest in the
matter One of the neighbors MIXED
the animal that night, and came around
the next morning and showed the man
how to do it. The third day the cow
escaped the surveillance of the boy who
was left to watch her, and when the man
came home at night she was nowhere to
be found. The boy had also disappeared
and our neighbor found he was obliged
to hunt her up before supper He
walked around for while, and then re-
turned home, but the animal had not
been seen. Then he went off again and
made a very thorough search, and about
10 O'Clock that night he came back with
the COW, his clothes begrimmed with
Derspiration and dust, and his face
flushed and scratched. He wanted to
kick the animals ribs in, but realizing
that such a course would result In pc
cHniary damage, he changed his mind.
The boy wishes he had obeYed the first
impulse.
On the fourth day they churned, 50 as
to have fresh butter for the table The
mother took hold Of the dasher first, be-
cause she said she used 10 DO IT
when a girl, and liked no better sport.
She pounded away until she caught a
crick in the back that doubled her up
like knife, and theR she put the heir TO
it. He had ben standing around eagerly
awaiting for a chance and grumbling be-
cause he didn't get il, and when the
dasher was placed in his hand, he was 50
happy he could hardly contain himself
He pumped away for an hour al il and
then be said if he had TO do it any more
he would run away and be a robber
At noon the man came home and
learned the situation He was little
Disguised at the '.tOmfoolery,' as he
called il, and took hold of the chuTu
himself. and made it bounce for q while.
Then his stomach commenced TO fall in,
and his spine 10 unjOint, and his Shout
ders to loosen. He stopped and wiped
off the perspiraiion, and looked around
with melancholy cast TO his features,
and went at it again. The butter didn't
come, however, but everything in the
way of oTatorical effect did. He cot so
dreadfully excited that his wife, SMELL
ing strong of camphor, took the dasher
away from him and went to work her
self. AT this moment the son put bis
cap undcr ms Jacket ana mTaculouslY
disappeared. Lator ia tho day the milk
was poured around the grape vine. On
the fifth day the COW knocked down a
length fence to the next lot, and ate all
the oranges from tree that stood in a
tub, and when the people attempted To
drive her out, She carried away a new
ivy on her horns, knocked valuable
vase of flowers, and capped the climax
by stumbling over a box of MOSES, and
falling on pile Of hot house frames.
On the sixth day our neighbor sold his
cow 10 a butcher, and now eats strong
butter which comes from the store
DdHbury Aelrs.