Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1873-11-05
Miscellaneous Items.


IT is said that three-ffths of the
farmers of Iowa use tallow eandlesyet.
BARNEY WILLIAMS has recovered the
use of his left eye.
LILIES arc among our exports to
Europe. s
A NEW Mormon tabernacle at Logan,
Utah, is to cost $4,000
LIE assets of the Southern Metho-
DIST publishing House at Nashville are
S221,OOO above its liabilities.
WHY is a newsboy like a cJ1cumber2
Because the older he grows the more
of a yeller he'll be.
MARX TWAIN has been travelling
through Scotland with a Mrs. Clemens.
What will Mrs. Twain say2
The women take lively interest in
the farmers movement. They~are
naturally patrons of husbandry.
$50 dark and yet so light" as the
man said when he looked at his last ton
of coal.
A DANBURY jeweler is confident the
day will come when sleeve buttons will
be sold by the pound 54
A CoNNECTICUT soldier has returned
a silver teapot stolen from a Virginia
family in 1862, and he sleeps better.
AN Indianapolis firm recently an
nounced their intention to make it
cred hot in dry goods"
A LAWYER in Egypt, ILL.,, advertises
for the 8 hairs of Rebecca Long. It
must be switch she has lost
The courts of Illinois are reported to
have already over 5000 divorce cases
on their dockets, with accessions at
the rate of 80, 900 per annum.
DURING the present century there
has been expended in England and
Wales for dwelling houses over SIS, O0O,-
100000. "a a .e9
The "cast of countenance y of an
English tragedian at present in Paris.
is described by French critic as that
OF 'Don Quixote giving away tracts.n
A LADY reporter, sent to an Agricu1-
tural Fair, wrote of lot of new pigs:
They look too sweet to live a min
Ute.
"PooR Jim Wayne |" remarks an
Indiana paper, ''he has gone where
bar-tenders don't scowl when man
fills the glass up.'' 81 II IL
WHEN you are travelling in Vermont
II you meet a stranger it is safe to ask
him: "Whose patent churn are yoW
selling?"
Do LEWIS says that a diet of beans,
is better for the complexion than all
the powders and creams ever mann.
featured. as
GLOVE" says an amorous writer ssiss
an internal transport. An exchange
remarks, 9'the same might be said of
canal boat" aau
IT was remarked recently of a SOL
EMMY precise youth ''He looks as if
he was setting an example to his ances-
tors" g 81 4s}t"
The olive harvest in France prom
ises most favorable yield. The PROS
pect is that there will be no demand
for the branches. sk,eu
i A GENTLEMAN once met avery quiet
newsboy selling papers. els there
any news 2" inquired the gentleman
"Lots O news" replied the boy, ''but
nothin' to holler."
The manner Of advertising for hus-
band in Java is by placing an empty
flower pot on the portico roof-whichl
is as much as to say: Young. lady
here-Husband wanted"
The Melbourne Argus announces
that the spring show of certain hor-
ticultural society will be held on the
9Th of November. So much for living
at the antipodes.
OF the $4,000 Americans permanent
~ residing in Paris, nearly 10000 are
from Louisiana, 5000 from Virginia,
8, 900 from other southern states, and
only 1000 from the north and west. "a
A TEXAS jailor, named Bean, has
been sentenced to four years In the
penitentiary for completely in the es- j
cape of prisoners. A few similar ex- !
amples might serve to make, New York
prisons more secure.
TURKEYS are beginning to make corn
and Indian meal look sick, and SEEM
to be wondering why the keepers are
suddenly so generous with their food.
They will discover the milk in the CO.
coanut in a little over four weeks
time.
GAMMA, dear, if I should attempt
to spell Cupid, why could not get be-
yond the first syilable9" Anna gave it
mp, whereupon William said, because
when I come to u, of course I cannot
go any further
DURING last winter 425 bird cages for
sparrows were made and securely fas-
tened to the trees in the public grounds
at Washington. The birds have in
creased rapidly and seem to be per-
fectly acclimated.
HUSBAND, who has been out West on
business and has left his wife some
blank checks Mary, I find you have
considerably overdrawn at the BANK
Mary Nonsense, John how can
that be! I've two of those blank
checks left yet. .
The famous wit and beauty, Lady
Wortley Montague, made the most sar-
castle observation ever published about
her own sex, cit goes far she said,
G to reconcile me to being woman
when reflect that am in no danger
of ever marrying one
A GIason comeyesof the sments thu
on MormOnism: &C How absurd four