The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1873-09-04
ALL Sorts Of Paragraphs.

things as they come!
The handsomest thing in shawls is pref
ty girl.
= A question of privilege-asking to 60
home with a girl.
- Deacon Davis, of Springfield, ILL.,, has
profanity in making use of the expression "by
gum"
Why are printers bills, these times, like
faith? Because they are the substance of
things hoped for, the evidence of things not
seen.
= The Rock Hill Lantern very feelingly
suggests that there is not all editor in the State
who would refuse to accept "back pay"-from
subscribers.
-"Among all my boys" said an old man,
'I never had but one boy who took after me,
and that was my son Aaron, who took after me
with pole"
"A boy in Lowell, Massachusetts, took nine
hundred and fifty boxes of pills last week. He
took them from the factory and traded them
for sticks of licorice.
= Judge-"Have you anything to offer to
the Court before sentence is passed on you ?"
Prisoner-"No, Judge; had ten dollars, but
my lawyers took that"
- A student, who had been afflicted with q
sermon one hour and half long, grumblingly
says that these professors study so much
about eternity that they have no conception
of time.
"A young man who recently went to Chica-
go writes that the wider the circle of his ac-
ouaintance grows the more profoundly he SYM
penitentiaries.
- It is now denominated "the sweetest thing
| in life" to take Sunday trip to the leafy for
est, meander through the brush, get full of
red-bugs, and enjoy poor mans delight-a
good scratch.
- The American Association for the Ad-
vancement of Science, now in session at Port
land, Me-, has appointed a committee to
memorialize Congress in regard to the preser-
vation of forests
"A lovely fellow advertises in Chicago
paper for wife, and rather intimates that he
prefers poor girl. Let him take the first one
who responds and he will be almost certain to
get very poor one. -,
- To take iron rust out of muslin, moisten
it with the juice of lemon; then put on salt
and expose to the sun. 1t may need more than
one application. This application will only
answer for white goods.
-"Pretty bad under foot to-day" said one
citizen to another, as they met on the street.
eyes, but it's fine overhead" responded the
other. "True enough" said the first, "but
then very few are going that way"
- A minister took for his text "The flesh,
the world and the devil" lie informed his
astonished audience that he would dwell briefly
in the flesh, pass rapidly over the world, and
hasten as fast as he could to the devil.
-" "John," said doating parent to her gor-
eat the whole of the pudding with impunity?"
'I don't know, ma," answered the young hope
full; 'but guess 1 can with spoon"
- An old bachelor says if girl wants to
know when she looks most charming in the
eyes of men, it is when she wears simple
| muslin dress, with frill of lace around the
neck and wrists, and no ornaments but youth
and freshness
| - Mr.. d. d. Webber, of Spartanburg, has a
variety of corn of which the stalk, blades and
shucks are of dark, reddish color, and when
matured will dye cloth a beautiful purple The
tassel, which is large and flowing, bears several
grains of sound corn.
- To prevent cow sucking herself put q
circinge around her, put strap around the
bottom of her horns and fasten small leather
strings from the strap on her horns to the belly
band. This prevents the COW from turning her
head either way, while she can eat without any
bother
- One OF the most painful surgical opera
tions is removing nails which have grown into
the flesh. There is no necessity whatsoever for
this pain. The new method is 10 keep the pa
tient ten or fifteen days in bed or on a sofa
with bread or meal poultice applied to the
toe. This poultice is changed several times
daily, and the toe is bathed twice a day in wa
ter as warm as may be borne. In ten or fifteen
days the nail becomes so soft it may be cut
with scissors and removed by hand without the
least pain.
- gentleman, soliciting funds fora benev
olcnt object, once called upod one of those men
who always have a back door of escape from a
collector. Before he had fairly entered the
room, the man called out: II can do nothing
for you; you are the seventh this morning; l
cannot give you anything" He would not al,
low him even to state the case. Tile good old
solicitor was so amazed that he gave the retort
courteous: "Well, sir, if you did not give more
to the other six than you give me, seven more
--S-S-