Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1873-04-25
AVa1at Courier
aeIssoRsNGs.

I
Large scale"
Greenwood Cemcte has l51,s perma
rcnt re- dents.
l;i,l Shanks says that courtship is bliss. bu
lnafrimony is blister.
One my live rs a conqncror, king, or
rra,ristrate but he must tic as a man.
II see through it, az the washcrwoman
said when the bottom Of her Tub fell out.
GAINESVILLE. O.. complains of Il water-works
ring. which has drawn 100000, but NO
water.
An oycrreacI,ing tradcsman is a pick
pockct; and an unprincipled customer IS
robbrr.
A pcnknife ARRAY between two young
ladies Is the latest sensation in Delaware Co.,
Pennsylvania.
..Driyer. are you running on time to-day?''
NO sr.'' was tlie keen reply, I'VE are rum
ming for cash.
The most beautiful may be most admired
and caresseil. but they are not always the
most esteemed and loved.
4 Michigan barkeeper is called on TO pay
for horse stolen by an incbriated Indian TO
whom he had sold liquor.
Tn order TO quiet the variety of reports,
Wild Bill " writes to Kansas City paper
admitting that he is dead.
A proprietor of a soothing syrup frankly
says that after the baby has taken one bottle
# he will never cry any more.
He that thinks himself the happiest man IS
really so; put he that thinks himself the
wisest. is generally the greatest fool
A little girl holding kitten in her arms
when suddenly she let it drop, saying: OH,
dear me. shes got pins in her toes.H
Mark I vain thinks himself better nah
thar George Washington He says, " Wash
ington could not tell lie. can, but WON'T"
The difference between sealing-wax and
women. says Reuben. is that one burns to
keep IL secret md the other to tell ir. SLAM
der!
A man WHO Was toll to remember Lots
wife. replied that lie had trouble enough with
his own, without remembering other mems
wives.i tltfe
4 young man " no was crossed In love at
tempted suicide recently by taking dose OF
yeast powder. He Immediately rose above
his troubles.
A doctor went FOR Il days sport, and COM
planned of having killed nothing. That's
The consequence Of having neglected your
business observed his wife.
THE cheerful crash of the exploding oil
lamp was heard in Columbus the other day
A haggard widowcr is finding balm in his
rifles Insurance policy.
Have frank explanations with friends in
cases of affronts. They sometimes save a
epcrishirg friendship; but secret discomfort
and mistrhst always end badly.
You will always notls one thing; the devil
Ecver offers to 60 into partnership with bizzy
man; but yu will .ttcn see him offer few
fine the lazy, and furnish all the capital.
4 gcntlcmaH in Springfield asked anoth-
or whether certain doctor had any practice
..Oh. yes was The reply. +" / assisted i'll lay
ing out one OF his patients the other day.
A woman lecturer says woman's sphere is
bound ON the north by her husband, on the
east by her baby, on the south by her mother
ir-law, and on the west by maiden aunt.
A recrant husband in Patterson, N. j.,
has been compelled to pay S4 weekly for his
wifc.s support, the Court having refused to
recognize divorce which he procured in
Indiana. # IC 2EIt ii iI
A Western editor anent the announcement
of n series OF symphony performances, le-
marked that with the number of cats in that
neighborhood they've had about enough
Thomas concerts already.
An ignorant woman, Of great wealth and
pretcnsions,. said, in response to a compliment
about some mutton on her table /" Oh, yes,
my husband Away buys the best. He isn't
stingy. and, besides, he's great epicac."
The wearing Of false hair is traced back to
the time of Margaret of Navarro, who, thro
sickness. lost all of hers, and had to depend
upon the blonde locks cut from plebeiar
iHCtlUR. SHc WIS ailiof'S lhC Aio5 ~ Hol lsis
first, ladies who wore wigs.
The man who can't be happy unless Iii:
mothcr-in-law lives in the same house will
lin ism resident of New York. He lives
in Jersey Ciy. He SAYS she's the only
woman who can tackle his wife successfully
They take nap SO much time jawilg eaci
other that lie has peaceful life. -
BY being contemplate, We set mems mind
to the tune Of contempt. 1t is in those act
called trivialties that the seeds of JOY are for
ever wasted. until men and women lool
round with haggard faces Mt the devastation
their own waste has made, and say the cart
bears no harvest of sweetness.
An old bachelor editor thus, in his spite
comments OH recent moonlight incident
We left our sanctum at midnight last night
and on our way home saw a young lady an
gentlman holding gate ON its Iii, ges. The
were evidently indignant at being out S
late. and saw them bite each other sever;
timcs.o
1t Is said that little railroad in Louisian:
il run on very uncertain schedule. .
stranger came In the other day and inquire
how often the steam car made trips up tt
country. The party interrogated said 'tr
weekly sWhat do you mean by tri-weel
ly?' The answer was, !" 1t goes up OF
week and tries to come down the next