The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1873-11-07
Pith and Point.

Pith and Point.
THE first "Black Friday"-Robinson
Crusoe's.
A GOLD editor is always man of the
write sort.
To LEARN the value of money-Try to
borrow it.
WHY is a chicken like farmer? Be-
cause both delight in full crop.
WHY is sharpening a knife an expen-.
sive practice Because you get rid OF
the blunt.
WHY is a sawyer like a lawyer? Be-
cause whatever way he works, down
comes the dust.
SINCE the introduction of ironclads
into the navy, we have great increase
of hard-ships at sea.
"Among all my boys" said an old
man, 81 never had but one boy who
took after me with club.
WHEN the enterpaising butchers as
sistant "set up on his own hook, did
he find comfortable seat?
oman is a mystery" said young
lady to her beau. Eyes, DEAR" said
he, "and girl is MISERY"
WHAT is the difference between a
mouse and a girl One harms the
cheese and the other charms the he's.
THE world is full of compensations.
The more prices go up, the more we
have to "come down " for everything
WHAT is the difference between an
honest merchant and q carpenter? One
is q plain dealer, the other is deal
palmer.
SOME scamp at Fort Wayne mailed
letters to q score of business men tell
ing them to look out for man who
would visit their houses that evening to
see their wives, and twenty business
men surprised their wives by coming
home two hours ahead of time.
A SUNDAY-sCHooL teacher, explaining
the first chapter of Genesis, asked
"Why did God command them to leave
the fruit of one tree untouched ?" A
dead silence. At la t little girl spoke
up and said: "Please, marin, / think
he wanted to leave some for manners ~
A DETROIT woman asks for q divorce
because her husband is drunk about
twenty-seven days of each month He
has cut off her hair while she slept,
wakens her at daylight by throwing
water over her, has twice tried to pour
kerosene down her throat, and puts hot
potatoes in her hands and washes them
by squeezing her fingers.
A CHAP in New Orleans has hit upon
a new way of raising the needful. He
was engaged to marry wealthy young
lady, when a rival denounced him as a
deceiver and in every way unworthy,
whereupon the engagement was broken
off. The rejected party has sued the
slanderer for the amount he would have
obtained had he married the lady.
IT may not be fair to call the follow
ing "fair item, but here it is: A
State fair is queen an agricultural
fair is q farmers daughter ; church
fair is parsons wife; soldiers fair is
the best looking girl he can get hold of;
a charity fair is female pauper; and
the most unpopular fair is that which is
furnished at cheap boarding houses.
LITTLE JENNIE T is five years old.
Her uncle gave her doll. Jenny cher
ished the doll with all mothers care.
The other day she was nursing it on her
knees she started suddenly, the doll
fell, and the head was broken off. Jenny
was overcome with grief at this misfor-
tune, and looked aghast at the poor
headless doll; then raising her eyes,
said, with a sigh of resignation, can
other little angel in heaven"
FLIRr's MRDITATIoss
We are told by those who know
" Absence makes the heart grow fonder"
That the true affections grow
When the lovcrs-over yonder.
can't say find IL So
Something's wrong; I shouldn't wonder
Yes, find old loves will 90,
Where know not, yonder.
New ones fill their places though,
And it will not do to ponder;
When cannot find beau
Then III try the old ones-yonder.