Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1873-10-16
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
Street.-The pepper market.
THE NICK OF TIME-Panic(k(

A LOST ART-Domestic economy.
PEOPLE about Bulls Head complain of
| tough beef
BRIGHT AND SHINING LIGHTs-The lit
| tie bootblacks.
CAN ship with two owners be called
partnership?
A COUPLE of horse-thieves in Kansas
have just suspended"
A WITTY housewife saws there is no
venison in this market, bus plenty of dear
meat.
The South Carolina suicide who swal-
lowed some pounded glass, died of a pane
in his stomach.
n SUFFERER suggests an improvement
in the photography of the word panics
He thinks it would be better to spell ii
payntr!
A FAMILY consisting of a widowed
mother, three sons, and two daughters all
married at once in Cincinnati, recently
That is sensible family.
PERISH that power which has been OBJ
tanned by evil means, retained by similar
practices, and which is administered as
badly as it was acquired.-Cicero.
A SOUTHERN editor pops the question
in his paper in this public fashion
There's certain girl in this town who
can carry our smoke-house keys for life
if she'll only say the word"
The vigilance committees in Montana
no longer hang small thieves They
merely fetch out the rascals in q new role
put them in hogsheads, which are
closed up and set rolling down hill.
HERE is the latest description of kiss
"'Twas night. A real warm couple stood
in the pale, cold sunbeams Their lips
touched, and there was a sound like a
COW hauling her hoof out of the mud"
CAPTAIN CAULFIELD and the Rev Mr.
Jackson killed notorious man eating
tiger with strychnine recently in Madras,
| India. This tiger for the last three years
had killed a man week on an average.
DIVINE WISDOM, intending to detain us
| some time on earth, has done we'll
to cover with vail the prospect of our
life to come; for if our sight could clear
ly distinguish the opposite bank, who
would remain on this tempestuous coast ?
| Nine. de .Stdel.
A LADY in New Hampshire recently
died from the effects of ether, taken for
the purpose of having tooth drawn
| Moral: Some ladies should either quit
having teeth drawn or let ether alone
either one horn or the other of this d-
| lemma must be adopted.
IT is related as an instance of the ex-
travagance of New England humor, that
| when a young farmers wife made her
first boys pants precisely as ample before
as behind, the farmer exclaimed: Good
ness? he won't know whether he's going
to school or coming home"
A WEALTHY farmer of Fulton has this
notice posted up in his field: 'If any man
or woman's cows or oxen gifts in these air
oats, his or her head will be cut Off as
| the case may be. A man eye um, and pay
| mi taxes, but cOnfOOZilatiOn to a man who
| lets his critters run loose said eye"
My lord rides through his palace gate,
Ny lady sweeps along in state,
| The sage thinks long on many thing,
And the maiden muses. on marrying;
The minstrel harpeth merrily,
The sailor pows the foaming sea,
TIE huntsman kills the good red deer,
And the soldier without fear;
Nevertheless, 1Chdte'er betdN,
| Tie farmer he must feed them all.
GRATITUDE OF A COw.-A gentleman
passing through a field, observed cow
| showing many symptoms of uneasiness,
| stamping her feet and looking earnestly al
him. At first he feared to approach her,
but afterward went toward her, which
seemed to please her She then guided
him to ditch where her calf was living
helpless, and he was just in time to save
its life, to the great delight of the COW.
A NEGRO once said in prayer-meeting:
"Bredren, when | was a boy | took a
hatchet and went into the woods. When
| found a tree dat was straight, and big,
and solid, I didn't touch dat tree; but
when | found one leaning a little, and
holler inside, / soon had him down. So
when de debbil goes after Christians, he
don't touch dem dat stand straight and
true, but dem dat lean little and are
holler inside.h
Mrs. Lame" sighed
Mrs. Partington. Here | have been
| sufferin' the bigamies of death for three
mortal weeks. First / was seized with a
bleedin' phrenology in the hamshire of
the brain, which was exceeded by the
! stOppage Of the left ventilatOr of the heart.
This gave me inflammation of the left
| boraX, and now | am sick with the chloro-
| form morbus. There is no blessin' like
| that of health particularly when you're
| ILL.,"
THE bear of the Arctic regions does not
| hug like the other bears, but bites at his
/ opponent; and he declines to eat his cap
tive until life is quite extinct. Like cat,
he plays with his victim. Among the
Esquimaux Of Greenland he plays strange
| pranks, often creeping upon the hunter
while busy fleeing seal, and tapping
him on the shoulder with his powerful
paw. Then it is the unfortunate mans
! cue to "feiGn dead" so that when Brownie
| retreats few PAGES to enjoy the prospect
of his intended meal the gun can be got
| ready before he returns again to the at
! tack.
| AN old English farmer debating his
will to a lawyer, said: Il give and be-
| queath to my wife the sum of f100 year.
! Is that writ down, master?" Yes" said
| the LAWYER; "but she is not so old but that
| she may marry again. Won't you make
any change in that case? Most people do"
''Ah do they? Well, wife again and say,
| if my wife marry again, | give and be-
queath to her the sum of f200 a year.
| Thatll do, won't it?" "Why, that's just
double the sum that she would have had
! if she had remained unmarried,' said the
lawyer; ''it is generally the other way"
aye" said the farmer, "but him that
takes her will deserve itn
A RICHMOND, VA, paper tells story
Of very sagacious dog and very foolish
man, and the man owns the dog. He is a
married man, and the other evening told
| his young wife that he was going to the
''lodge." The wife anxiously looked for
| the return OF her husband until the small
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