The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1873-07-31

H
sARite Lie lad ..b.a. h.
esas sha j. dlnrali - 90 rhaBae3
A teieraa draper ssys Tat although
BE- CLERKS are YeFy laxative danag the
daf tbey SIRE almays ready 70 shal ~ 81
aKid.
Ma i bfaiAl husband Ike . de.
sa1sfe1 eabmaH Boeause be frequently
aliases BE fair
The man Who tas down On 81 open
pApsrof tacls sid they reminded him o.
~ Income tsK
supp0dug n4n 10 be 10 a serious
frame o. mia8, Is IL necessary be should
he pistars o. despair
a saldrf was going Of the Geld too
hastily ubeu The pror0st-marshai cried
Hal.
Can't
NoundtdY
Nol'm s1orci, and want 10 20 to the
rear aud-rul'y
Another match broken up, This was
between clerk in a Danbury drygoods
store aud young lady Of that place.
II Wa 70 warm on Friday evening that
size bad The parior window up aud he
stood 90 The lawn aud he was just reach
iug Up for another kiss, when the sash
eane down ike 4 cash. aud knocked OF
lbe peak o. bis nose and sealped bis chin,
and be hoped around 50 mAdly and
hualeI 70 dreadfally that the old gentle
m4n Thought be was drank, and had him
kicked out Of tho yard With great deal
Of osientaiion Monday morning he
went West
The ayaricIous man Is often the vic
iim Of his own greed. A Peoria boy had
two punches ofiire-crackers given him the
Fourth. which be crammed into his peck
IT, bu, noticing another lying idle on the
sidewalk be crammed that IN with the
rest. II CHANGED that the vital spark was
present in the soul Of that idle crscker,
aud Suddenly that boy became the busiest
youth In that town. There was about
80 distinct explosions in that pocket, aud
al each one be turned two double sum
mersauIts aud shrieked with terror,
When quiet was at length restored be
clapped bis hands upon the scorched and
lacerated ruins Of once healthy abdo-
men, and groaned his disapprobation of
the pilgrim fathers for ever establishing
free country.
Some years ago, a luminous lawyer,
with considerable swell but not much
brains went TO Doylstown to 10 cate.
not long after, when the post Office was
fan Of people awaiting the DISTRIBUTE on
OF the mail, half.witted follow stepped
OPP 10 the Young Green-bag with the re-
mark:
Mr.. S., they tell me You have
come here to practice law,
Yes sir, | have.
Well, you'll find il good location. !
hadn't been here four months before was
suod ten times!
Well, said Sit seems to me
that could live here for years without
being sned at all
Nou bet People around here are
darucd smart, | tell you, You don't
ketch them suing Teller without he's
good for the costs
All things are systematized nowadays.
Even every niIk-train has its cowcatch-
er.
The Utica Heratd tells how an Ok
ford sohool.mistress punished three tru
ants who the other day went fishing in
stead Of attending to their studies. On
The following morning they held consul
lation Al 10 how they could best prepare
for the wrath to come, the result of which
was that they entered the school-room
each dressed In three pairs Of winter pam
falcons An uncomfortable morning
wore away noon came but no whipping.
The day was extremely warm, but the
whipping would surely come during the
afternoon. The afternoon passed away
At last The boy with the newest trow-
sers on 6ioHght Il never would. Before
'he scholar. were dismissed tho three
raHawaNs were requested to remain, The
enl OF six hauf- sweitcrug had at last
come Tie trial ol juvenile Ingenuity
over pedagogical severity was near At
hand. The rest of the scholar, gone, the
lhpe regranis wer summoned before
lbe teacher, who merely lcetgred them
on Use improperly OF running away
ftpm selooi, and thea dismissed them.
Three warmer, more rugraetul or more
supremacy diAzusied urchius never threw
mud at a strange boy than they who IA.
eigei from the 'cho1l.honse and amblel
-"frowfuliy homeward.
Lutc Robbie went 10 a show aud
SAYS an elephant tor the first time Ia his
lie When BIC came home his mother
asked him what be had seen, Robbie
replied An elephant, mama, that Cob
hleI I.ay with his trout tail.
4 homesiek San Franciscan, who is
visiting the East, finds occasional relief
hs having ,and squirfed in his face and
town hi. back with bellows
Professor What are the uses Of
slarh 81 germinagion' Student reeiliug
81 Pc In ihs ticrmaH nation starch
noes yeft mach ne same a. he thi.
aaalA 10 doing 20 linen aud such
goods ProfessJr-if you give another
,usl answer = that, ! viii show you hop
llsey take Tie starch on, az students 10 the