Lamoille newsdealer. [volume] (Hyde Park, Vt.) 1860-1877, 1873-07-23
Grave and Gar.

TO boil a tOngue-Drink scslding eOf
fee.
"A pair efNevsda lovers have organic.
ed very pleasant way of spending their
evenings. lie boldsthe cat uDder bis arm
while she grinds its tail.
A debating society discussed the
question, as il wrong TO cheat lawyer1"
Aiier full discussion and mature delibera-
tion, the decision was, mot wrong. but
too difficult, 10 pay for the trouble"
There's an old lady with false teeth
out West who wants TO know il the YAM
KEGS can't invent some new way Of putting
on pillow-eases meanwhile she nails the
eases 10 the wall aud drops the pillows in.
Hoods street fun was irrepressible.
We read of his walking up to pompous
person in the strand, and saying TO him |
beg your pardon, sir, but may ask /: Are
goa anybody particular but be did not
wait for the answer of the magni6co,
In composing. thins much more Of
your matter than Of your manner. To be
sure, spirit, grace and dignity Of manner
arc Of great importance, both tho speak
.cr and writer; bat of Infinitely more i'm.
pOrtan,unce is the weight and worth of
matter Wiri.
Hood told story Of gentleman
driving his Irish servant in a cab, and
saying to him, half jocularly, half in an
ger: Now it the gallows had its due,
you rascal, where would ycu be now ?"
"Paith, then, your honor, it's riding IN
the cab, I'd be, all alone by myself, may
be 4"
"A negro witness on horse trial in
New Jersey court was asked 10 explain
the difference between small box stall
and common stall. Strengthening himself
up, he pointed to the square. e epelosure in
which ,he judge was seated, and said,
"Dat ar's what l call box stall, dere
what dat old boss is sittin'w 1t took the
sheriff some time to restore order in that
court.
DR.. Arnold of Rugby said There are
moments that arc worth more than years.
We cannot he P it there IS no proI ortion
between spaces of time in Importance nor
in value. A straw, unthought-of FIVE min
utcs may contain the event Of life. And
this all-importaDt memeRt, this moment
disproportionate TO all other moments.
who can tell when it will be upon us
| Leigh Hunt says /: Beauty too often
sacrifices to fashion. The spirit of fashion
is not the beautiful, but the willful not
J the graceful, bvt tho fantastic; not the
, superior in the abstract, but the superior
in the worst of all creatures-the vulgar
1t is the vulgariiy that can afford to shift
and vary itself, opposed to the vulgarity
that longs to do so, but cannot. The high
point of taste and elegance is to be sought
for, not in the most fashionable circles,
but ir the best bred, and such as can dis
pense. with the eternal necessity of never
being the same thing.
| In Western State there was occas
: ion, in suit before justice to re quirt
security from two persons in behalf q
plaintiff for cost of prosecuting the action
and it was agreed by the plaintiffs tive
: counsel that they should both sign them
selves. The senior did so, and turning tt
his junior, whose reputation through the
, country was that of jolly, clever, in
pccunious fellow, who never paid any
: thing, remarked: "Now, d., it is YOU
turn d. looked at the paper, and thcI
+ in quizzical way shook his head and re
0 marked: "No, on the whole | guess
q won't dilute the security"
AT recent trial. the counsel for thu
u prosecution, after severely cross-examin
G ing witness, suddenly put on look o
g severity, and exclaimed =
n "Now, sir, was not an effort made t
induce ycu to tell different story?"
"A different story from what hav,
told, do you mean!"
t Eats what mean?"
s "Ycs, sir, several persons have tried t
r get me to tell different story from wha
g | have told you, but they couldn't"
"NOw, then, upon your oath, l wish t
IS know who those persons are"
C "Well, you have tried about as hare
d as any of them"
;. No futhcr questions.