The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1873-11-01
A trade is half g mans fortune.

A trade In half g mans fortune.
Last words Of Jack--"I'll be hanged
fl 60 up on that platform"
"Yeu don't do that again." said the
pig to the boy who cut his tail of.
A return to the old plan Of appren-
ticing boys TO trades is being advo-
Gated.
T. Mast In registered on the alphabe-
tical list Of arrivals at Boston as "Nast
r."
A correspondent Of paper having
described the Ohio as "a sickly stream
I the editor appended theremark: "Tbat's
soft is confined to its bed"
"A Western paper has an article on the
: care Of idiots" A contemporary says
that paper is always dragging family
.,affairs before che public.
ie9sA A citizen Of Housewife, p, boasts
. that his village can beat Boston out of
I y sight on crooked streets, and then have
I crooks enough left over to start another
town.
2 aei'The abolition of the national banking
csaystem, and the substitution of free
banking, with nothing but legal.t tender
q e'CitGdlation, is now attracting some atten-
ton.
z An Iowa pal ler proclaims itself an
''honest newspaper" and in another
paragraph says: "When man pro-
SssssS honesty nowadays, keep your
e eye peeled for thief"
"a a Partisan, whose wife lately died,
imagined himself transformed into
: weeping willow, and went about the
streets of Paris with flower pot on his
head to announce his transformation.
The Louisville Co,irier.Journal says
that ga Tennessee editor, who has been
drinking Cincinnati whisky for month
has written to an Eastern publishing
, house for patent inside"
a. Texas barber who ornamented his
front door with white knob is said to
have had no peace until the last vestige
Of il had been shot away by his sprightly
neighbors, who made use of it us target
.ss& So witty compliment is rarely made
sap that of Sydney Smiths to his friends,
MrS. Tighe and Mrs. CufFo: "Ah,
there you are the cuff that every one
would be glad to wear, and the tie tina.
noone would loose"
aFaAn insurance decision in Richmond
istp the effect that Northern company
fia Liable for the amount of premiums
paid before the war on policies which
'lapsed during the war, ifthe companies
Eefused application for renewal after
EhsrWar closed.
asThS people Of Providence are highly
iBesnsed at the discovery of an old
English Gazetteer, published in 1T76.
which describes Bristol as a tuwE 10
NasaaRRglRnd having sommodious
hAfbor, ut the entrance of which lies
Rhode Island"
'NGreensburg wants directory. 1t is
aInishtly' occurrence that many of her
citizens cannot find the way to their
homes. 1t will require peculiar direo-
tory TO elucidate the intricacies of the
streets Of the town on such occasions,
however.
The host of young men in every large
city who apply for employment and fail
to get it for the reason that they are
oteducated or specially fitted for any
particular business constitutes potent
argument in favor of reform. Under
the apprentice system wo should have
fewer ignorant mechanics and incompe-
tent business men.
a young grass widow, aged 25 years,
and ex-spouse of four living husbands,
Is about to harvest her fifth hay crop in
Salt Lake City. Her first husband vas
Yankee, her second an Italian, her
third Swiss, her fourth German, and
her prospective fifth is Polauder. The
Tho Widows tastes are truly cosmopoli-
tain, and she seems ready to take the
world to her glowing and caprioious
bosom.
The Missouri Republican says of the
panic aWe may as woll prepare for a
aacopai shock at no very distant day,