Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1873-07-30
BREVITIES.

is Inc united OrQor OF OODUlo-StOnc
/ Throwers," and their motto is eDeath to
| the Heather Chinee"
/ THE Missouri River has made cutoff
at the Big Bend, four miles south of
~OnaWa, Iowa, thus transferring about
| 1,500 acres to Nebraska.
|. f7AMAssACHUsETTs postmistress has re-
! signed her. office, as a matter OF honesty,
| because she can't find time to read all the
postal-cards and attend to her other duties
| besides.
THREE women, one at a time, married
a rich old Philadelphia in order to live
after him, but he has buried each one,
and now, at the age of ninety, is looking
for the next.
THE model of the ideal American jury
man appeared in the panel summoned to
! try the Woodruff Clafin case, and in re
spouse to inquiries, said he chad never
| heard of Mr. Beecher''
THERE were two remarkable things
about Nancy Harvey, who died in Balti-
more last week: She was III years old
never nursed George Washington, in fact
| didn't even know him.
A BosToN paper tells story of a pro-
| fessional burglar of that vicinity who took
q pride in his vocation, and recorded the
results of his nightly expeditions in vol
ume PACED and lettered after the fashion
Of merchants journal.
A FARMER residing near Davenport,
Iowa, recently strewed his potato-tops
| literally with Paris green to kill the bugs
The following night his horses broke into
the potato patch, ate the tops and the
poison, and three of them died.
AT the Caledonian Club games at
Scranton, Pa, on the Fourth, the feature
OF the day was a fat woman's race for a
new bonnet. The leanest contestant
weighed $50 pounds Three others
weighed 200, 242 and 251 respectively.
A MEMPHIS girl was married the other
| day, and Immediately sold her piano,
bought sewing machine, and made her
| husband suit of clothes and herself two
calico dresses, and now fourteen young
| men are seeking the hand Of her unmar-
ried sister
BALTIMORE boys know what fun is A
crowd OF them covered a cat with a robe
OF tar and hemp, the other night and then
set lire to it, causing the animal to do
some startling gymnastics and sing di-
vertlng dirge. Baltimore wants few
more monuments, boys Sizes
A CONSCIENTIOUS Pittsburgh man prom
| ised his wife the other day that he
wouldn't drink another drop as long as he
had hair on his head That very night
be had his head shaved smooth, and then
got drunk with proud consciousness Of
having faithfully kept his promise
ESQ MAKE GOOD YEAsT-Take five or
SIX potatoes fine Then add two
tablespoons Of sugar and one of salt
Take one quart Of water and handful Of
hops. Boil a few minutes, strain and stir
into potatoes. Set on the stove and stir
until thick. When cool add one cup of
yeast.
To MAKE WALL PAPER STICK. Make
a paste OF flour same as you do for starch;
do not let it boil When cold apply to
the paper with a brush, not having it SO
thick but that it will spread evenly over
the surface, or so thin as to wet the paper
through. Cheap paper is not so cheap at
last as a little better paper.
SEVERAL New York reporters are try
ing to form coalition against such news
papers as refuse to allow them to use free
ly such favorite terms as "inaugurate,"
''confagration," "holocaust," ts'canine
quadruped,' funeral obsequies," and
other sounding absurdities They declare,
and truly enough, that if these words are
denied them, they can have nothing to
say.
A WEALTHY New York gentleman, Of
an original turn of mind, is going to have
stables built upon his grounds after the
model of the pyramids of Egypt. He
contends the pyramid is the proper form
for dwelling houses also, and has the adj
vantage Of putting a stop to the eternal
discussions about Mansard and other
roofs.
RELIEVING CHoKED CATTLE.-A cores
pendent Of the Germantown TeZeqronh
gives the following as his mode of reliev-
ing choked animals. Make ball of fine
cut chewing tobacco and molasses and
crowd as far back in the animals mouth
as possible with tongue pulled out; it soon
sickens the animal, relaxing the muscles,
and the vomiting will invariably throw
up the impeachment. a So 8aua8a.
A LITTLE s1x-year-old boy was asked by
his teacher to write a composition on the
subject of water, and the following is, the
production: "Water is good to drink, to
swim in, to skate on, when frozen. When
| was a little baby the nurse used to
battle me every morning in water I have
been told that the Injuns don'twash them
oOA'Oo Ooo OhoS Ii oCII Oo1O L Nl0ll 1
was an Injun!''
Four boys living at Jersey City recent
ly ran away from home. One. Of them
fashionably stole $4,000 from the bank
where he worked, and they all bought
sailors clothes, purchased a yacht and
started for sea. Nothing was heard of
them for some days. when one was found
on board a China clipper ship about to
sail. He said the treasurer of the four
had absconded and they had to dissolve
partnership.
LET young men wear old gloves, hat
and coat till they can honestly afford
new. It requires uncommon courage;
but it will have good results Men
schooled to such deeds of heroism will
refuse to endorse bad bills, will not vote
for scamps, nor kneel in the mud to
scoundrels who give lavishly what they
have gained lawlessly, nor take with
pride the hand of villain, however ex-
alted-J0za Hail.
A QUAINT sort of person. the Rev. Mark
Wilkes, once introduced his text in this
manner: "My hearers, did you ever see
cat? Did you ever see cat walk? Did