Weekly Trinity journal., 1873-05-03
UNDER THE CARPET.

The carpet knight who figures in the
following romance, Charles c., was
poor, but not proud, and early developed
considerable genius as a dry-goods clerk
in st. Louis. His person was handsome,
his clothes fitted him well, and he had
shoes made in Chicago. But he fell in
love with the niece of a rich widow of
Lucas place, in the aforementioned city,
thus his woes began.
The widow having higher aspirations
than Il "Clark's best spool thread 800
yards" artillery for her niece, perempto-
rily forbade that young lady holding any
intercourse with Charley.
AS Clara is dependent upon her aunt.
she, of course, appeared to acquiesce in
these ambitious designs, but she regis
tered vow to her looking-glass that no
one in the world should ever supplant
the dNpper yardstick man Of her ali6c-
tions.
One afternoon recently, Charley re-
ceivod note from his Clara, stating that
her relative would that evening attend
prayer meeting
The intimation was enough, and eight
O'Clock saw the young couple seated upon
the sofa in her aunt's library, billing and
cooling in the regular orthodox, turtle
dove style. Little Charley, lured by the
wichenos of love, became perfectly "im-
mense." lie wound his arm abolt her
waist and vowed her form was "syph-
like" He toyed with her golden ring
lets, and likencd them unto "truant sun
BEAMS" with few other remarks to the
effect that heavens dearest gift to her
sex was "a wealth of bright golden hair"
Then when she blushed, he swore the
smiled, that her lips were ruby portals
to a caskct Of pearls.
Indeed, he talked so nice, and she fed
upon his glowing words with such relish
that the old lady was Tattling away at
the door-bell as though the house next
door was on fire, full five minutes before
the absorbed lovers heard her.
Great heaven there S my aunt |" OK
claimed Clara.
Charley grew a trihc pale and muttered
an inteljecton or two pertaining to the
front end Of mill pond.
1t appears that the old lady, having
reached the place Of prayer, found the
meeting was epzooticed, or postponed,
and consequently after she had a little chat
with one or two of her neighbors, she had
returned home at this most inopportune
moment.
What was to be done Not closet
or nook invited a retreat, and there Char
ley stood and wished that he was a mile
age or stationary bill, so that he could
pass the houses as a member of the Louis
lana Legislature, or some other feature
Of modern civilization.
At last a brilliant idea occurred to his
lady-love. In a corner Of the library lay
a bundle Of carpet that had been brought
to the house that day to re-furnish the
sitting room, and having been duly in
spected by the ladies was temporarily
left in tumbled heap in one Of the cor
ners Of the room.
A hasty explanation took place, and
then Charley entomed himself beneath
the mass, with fervent vow that he
would die for her sake we're it necessary,
and then Clara admitted her aunt.
That relative was not well pleased at
being kept so long waiting on the door
step, and sharply demanded what had be-
come of the servants.
81 sent them to bed, dear aunt, so that
| might have the pleasure of remaining up
for your return, but / fell asleep" inno-
Gently remarked the ingenious girl.
This loving explanation somewhat ap-
peased the old lady, who, after warming
herself, walked over to the bundle of car
pet, and picking up corner wondered
how it would look by gaslight.
Clara FASTENED to assure her that it
would not look nice at all in fact she
was so confident Of it that there was no
need of taking the trouble to investigate.
The old lady pondered over the stuff
for few momeuts, while her niece sat
trembling upon the sofa, and Charlie felt
that the world might come to an imme-
diate end and not annoy him particle
by the suddennes of the change.
At last, however, the crisis passed, for
with some new idea entering her head,
the old lady turned and saying that she
was " tired to DEATH" pumped her two
! hundred and fifty avoirdupois upon the