The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1873-06-14

-htSSrs. DEMONSTRATING perused an article in
your paper of last week with the above title, by
which it appears that lncOg." has taken eXcep-
tons TO young man proyidingihimself with n
conveyance in order TO take his lady to a party
and, according to his expression, sling on a
little style, "(which by the way sounds like sangJ
and noticing that the moral" was omitted--by
chance We presume, or possibly by exhaustion
caused by over eXertion Of the mental faculty
in the preparation Of an address to be delivered
before one Of our leading granges-we have
taken the liberty OF sending you the second
chapter of said story, with the moral.
On last Saturday afternoon causual observer
might have noticed on any Of your principal
streets, Il man OF considerable dimensions and
ambling gait, rushing wildly to and fro. He car
red the FREE TRADER in his hand, and earnestly
inquired Of every one he passed, Have you
seen that article" and to their reply Of "What,
hitching posts: Z" he would savagely answer NO
Gray horses--twO milcs-hearse team. Dern
strange you didn't see il" and then rush
wildly on
The questions: "Whoisit?' :" What airs him ?"
were often asked, but asked in vain, for il is not
to be supposed that every one is acquainted with
the fact that Incog" is seeking ropow through
literary channels But let us follow him home
We must follow with Imagination as he is
furious driver, his team generally on the gallOp
when he is in hurry. He is SO DESTROYS OF
ascertaining whether the heroine Of onr story
has had the pleasure of It's perusal, that he stops
in front OF her residence and calls her forth She
hastens out but ere she reaches him he cries
li,f Go II. ,l,.
FREH TRADER? How is two miles with lady TO II
with the hearse team? How is that Peda--oh-
ah-Gnd he becomes painfully aware that "Peda"
is sitting within hearing, quietly enjoying the
fun at "IncOg.s' expense. His feelings react
He sezes his hat with both hands and cndeayors
To pull it over him, but it Will not stretch more
than SIX feet, thus leaving his feet, the most
prominent part Of him, exposed to view. He
then lodges behind the gate post but on account
Of good care in youth this will not conceal After
this he changed tactics, and Che next movement
we do not understand, unless II was for the dog
kennel which stands in the back yard a. hc was
making in lis direction, but was unluckfiv inter.
cepted by Ped" Here j. i situation; vet a
happy idea strikes him. Now he will extricatc
himself from thi. uncomfortable dilemma into
citing his little piece" Accordingly he mounts
the doorstep. and with . smile, the blandncss
Of which Al Sin or Capt jack never would dare
attempt, be strikes nooly ont.
Hi. audience is composed u the hero and
heroine oi the story and the occupant, of some
half dozen wagons, who have been attracted by |
his strange actions and Stopped 10 see the fun. 1
Ere be reaches the end 81 the second paragraph /
he begins 10 realizes that there !, bat one step /
from the sublime - the ridiculous" and that hc /
has taken that. The pressure j. too great-iump- /,
Ing from his stand" with such remarks - very /
cute piece " Dern good joke Wonder who /
have been 80 mean be- basi.ns 20 hi- carriage, I
cherred on the Way tie roar OF the company, who 1
now see wE"rc the laugh comes in As hc |
drives of be calls out &, rs h.-o, >.'y. Mister
Il .oG NJ keep mum, vii lend y5I ny team |
tie mex; Tine yJl v.-h - drive P-'aSp@!e-