The Placer herald., 1873-03-22
PELEti W. PONDER:
or THE POLITICIAN WITHOUT A SIDE.

n
1t is curious thing--an unpleasant thing
"a very embarrassing sort of thing but the
truth must be told-ii not at all times. at
least sometimes; and truth now compes the
declaration, that Peleg w. Ponder, whose
character is here portrayed, let him travel in
any way, can not arrive at conclusion. He
never had one of his own. lie scarcely
knows conclusion, even il he should chance
to see one belonging to o,her people. And
as for reaching result, he would never be
able to do it, if he could stretch like giraffe.
Results are beyond his compass. And his
misfortune is, perhaps, hereditary, his moth
er's name having been Mrs. Perplexity Pom
der, whose earthly career came to an end
while she was in duhitation as to which of
the various physicians of the place should be
called in. If there had been only one doctor
in town, Perplexity Ponder might have been
saved. But there were maryland what
could Perplexity do in such case?
Ponder's father was run over by wagon, l.,
as he stood debating with himself, in the
middle of the road whether he should es-
cape forward or retreat backward. There
were two methods of extrcation, and between
them both old Ponder became victim
How then could their worthy son, Peleg, be
expected to arrive at a conclusion lie never
does.
Yet, for ones general comfort and partc-
ular happiness, there does not appear to be
any faculty more desirable than the power
of making up the mind" Right or wrong,
it saves deal of wear and tear; and 1t pre-
v7nts an infinite variety of trouble. Com
mend us to the individual who closes upon
propositions like nutcracker; whose prompt
ness Of will has sedg hammer way with it +,
and hits nails on the head continually. Gen
ius may be brilliant-talent commanding :;
but what is gen us, or what is talent, if it
lack that which we may call the clnching
faculty-if it hesitates, veers, and flulters-
suffers opportunity to pass, and stumbles at
occasion? TO reason well is much, no doubt
but reason loses the race, if it sits in medita-
ton on the fence when competition rushes by.
Under the best of circumstances, some
Ling must be left to hazard. There is n
chance in all things. No man can so caleu
late odds in the affairs of life as to insure
certainty. The screws and linchpns ncces-
s'ry to our purpose have not the nhexibiliy
of a fate; yet they must be trusted at some
degree of risk Our candle may be put oul
by puff of wind on the stairs, let it be shel
tered ever so carefully. Betsy is "A good
cook, yet beeisteaks have been productive
cf s,ra,,gulation. Does it then follow from
this, that we are never to get TO bed except
~, Il nd 10 ala trop hrp,, l. mo
our fast until dinner is announced
One may pause and reflect too much
there must be action, conclusion, result, or
we are a failure, to all mtents and purposes
"a self-confessed failure-defunct from the
beginning. And such was the case with Pc
leg w. Ponder, who never arrived at ii con-
clusion, or conlrved to reach result. Peleg
is always "stumped" d"-he "don't know what
to think he "can't tell what to say'-an
unfinished gentleman, with mind like
dusty garret. full, as it were, of rickety fur
niture, yet nothing viceable-broker back
ed chairs three legged tables pitchers with
out handles-cracked decanters and fractured
looking glasses-that museum of mutalions
in which bousewifery rejoices under the
vague, but never-realized hope that these
things may eventually "come in play" Pc
leg opinions lie about the workshop of his
brain, in every stage of progress but the last
chips. sticks, and sawdust, enough, but
no article ready to send home.
Should you meet Peleg n the street, with
"Good morning, Peleg-how do you find
yourself to day?
"Well Il don't know exactly-Tm pretty
no. not very-pray, how do you do your
self?"
Now, if a man does not know exactly, or
hours, and having had abundant time to in
vestigate the circumstances of his case, it is
useless to PROFOUND questions of opinion to
such an individual. 1t is useless to attempt
it with Peleg. Glow do you do, puzzles
l,im-he is fearful of being too rash, and Of
making reply which might not be fully jus
tilted by after reflection. His head may be
about to ache, and he has other suspicious
feelings.
"People are all the time asking me how
do. and more than half the time can't tell
there's good many different sorts of ways
Of feeling betwixt and between very sick
thank you; and half dead, I'm obliged to
you;' and people won't stop to hear you ex
plain the matter. They want to know right
smack, wnen you don't know right smack
Yourself. Sometimes you feel things a-com-
ing. and just after you fel things a-going
And nobody's exactly prime all the while.
ain't, anyhow-Pm kinder so just now and
I'm sorter 'tother way just after. Then some
people tell You that you look very we'll, when
you don't feel very well-how then ?"
AT table, Peleg is not exactly sure what
he will take; and sits looking slowly up and
down the board, deliberating what lie would
ike, until the rest of the company have fin
sned their repast, there being often nothing
eft which suits Peleg's hesitating appetite
Peleg has never married-not that he is
averse to the cOnnubial state-on the contra
ry, he has a large share of the susceptibili-