Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes Co., O. [Ohio]) 1870-1895, 1873-03-06
A FUNNY ELoPEMENT.
How It was Planned and Ex.
5s ecuted.

"I'll tell you what it is, wife," sait
Peter Smith, and he emphasized the re
mark by wise shake of the forefinger
"things have got into a very bad way
The farm is mortgaged to the last cent
it is worth, and 1 owe heap Of money
beside-more by long shot that l know
how to pay. What is to be done?"
"I am sure I don't know, Peter" re-
piled the bothered wife, but, it seems
too awful bad to be turned out of the
house and home at our time oflife. Now
if our son John would only marry
Jonas Browns daughter Sally, it would
help us along amazingly. The Browns,
you see, are well off, and the connec-
ton would be perfect gold mine to
US. Of course they'd give Sally the
the hundred acres of land and things
they said they always would"
That is good idea, wife," and Peter
frightened up amazingly. "YOu al
ways were a cute woman, and the no
ton does you credit. But do you think
the young folks would take to it?"
al don't know, but it seems to me
that they have always taken n great no
ton to each other ever since they were
children been more like brother and
sister than anything else."
"But suppose the Browns would OBJ
ject as most likely they would? You
know we amt on good terms-thick as
the young folks have been."
az will tell you what, Peter, is just
the thing for us to do-put up John to
to elope with Sally"
"Agreed. 1 will leave it ali to you
to manage"
Thus the matter was settled, and the
scheming couple went to bed to dream
of a speedy release from their financial
embarrassments.
Condolences are sometimes of the
most curious character-almost sur
passing belief in some instances.
About the time of the above CONVEX
satien between Mr.. and Mrs. Smith,
their neighbors, Jonas Brown and wife,
held an important conferences. Ht
"Do you remember that note for six
hundred dollars gave for stock last
spring?" asked Jonas.
"Yes," replied the wife.
"well, it is coming due in about a
month and how under the sun we are
going to pay it do not know"
Mortgage the farm"
& "We have done that till it cannot be
mortgaged another cent. 1 am clean
discouraged, and there is Sally wanting
a piano. Where the money is to come
from is a mystery to me. We are on
the verge of bankruptcy" Wa
81 wish Sally would marry John
Smith-gracious knows they are to-
gether enough to take notion that
way. 4.sr.s
"Yes, but 1 do not see how that
would help us any," 5.-..
"You don't Ell? Well, l do. Amt
his folks rich? and wouldn't they set
him up handsomely? Then we could
stand some chance of getting help
through Sally"
"That is a good plan;" was Jonas
conclusion, after profound meditation;
but the difficulty is, that the Smiths are
not on good terms with us, and would
be likely to oppose the match"
"Then the best plan is to set the
young folks up to an elopement."
So it CHANGED that the Browns and
the Smiths planned to dispose of their
children to their own pecuniary advan-
tage. The next step in each case to
mould the young ones to proper shape.
John Smith was handsome, brawny
country fellow, with plenty of good
sense, and an ocean of love for Sally
Brown. When his parents proposed his
marrying her, he Informed them that he
would gladly do so, but he feared her
parents would object. Then his father
slyly suggested an elopement, and Of
fered to aid in carrying out such an ex-
plot. John said he would think about
it.
Sally was a rustic maiden with much
redness of cheeks, and rejoicing in the
possession of the lasting comeliness
which is derived from a bright smile,
sweet temper, and pair of clear, earn-
est eyes, made none the less expressive
by near neighborhood or saucy little
retrousse nose. Her wavy brown hair
had not a ripple out of place, and her
plump little figure was encased in
well-fitting dress, which was neatness
itself. When her parents spoke to her
about John, she blushed becomingly,
and, after close questioning, admitted
that she would be stickled to death to
marry him. She further stated that
they were running over with love with
each other; that they had long ago set