Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-05-08
The Mule.

EVERYBODY knows this anomaly in
animalism, as they fancy, very we'll indeed
We have all marked the queer, knowing
leery, sidelong glance of his eve at US, as
we passed by We have seen the furtive
agility with which the wisp of hay is
stolen from the passing wagon, and the
utter stolidity with which he stands with
hanging lip in the sun, asleep. The year
ling mule is the incarnation and sum total
of quadrupedal deviltry. He is the origi-
nator of distinct and uninterrupted Sc
ries of grotesque diabolisms. See him,
with his scant and ungraceful tail tangled
with a whole acre of heterogeneous burs,
the long and faded hair on his belly way
ing in the breeze, an inverted adOrnment,
so comically contrived as to be perfectly
in keeping with the nature and origin of
the brute. His fuzzy name, scarce grown,
sits upon him with the same air as do the
whiskers Of shaveling youth. He has a
curious jog-trot, which in itself suggests
careless and irredeemable depravity Il is
the gait Of one who goes steadily to the
bad yet never gets there. At that age the
eyes are foxy and shrewd, and lack the
look of sadness so often seen in those of
his aged relative of the dray and jobbing
wagon. The little black hoofs are hard
and polished and, like those of the goat
and channels, fitted for clinging in slippery
places. And those ears-in all his kind
they have ever refused to be hidden. Even
side of the barn they are ever moving
Now backward, now forward, and in OPP
posite ways. You tell by these tokens
Just when an unusually malevolent idea is
born within him. When they are laid
squarely back upon his neck, his counte-
nance is clear proof of the truth of the
science of physiognomy. Mischief has
then its incarnation. The clumsy limbs
astonish you with their sudden limberness
and fly high in the air with rapidity
which deties vision The faculty of aero
batic kicking never leaves him, whatever
else may betall.
Men whose laborS in this life have taken
the strange direction of embarrassing are
supposed to lead short lives and troublous
ones. From infancy to age, there is no
fence which will hold, no system which
will train them into staid and reliable
farm horse habits. Place twenty of the
youngsters at a long trough; feed them
literally with oats, and it will be more
from luck than prudence if you get away
from the shaggy conclave with less than
twenty of the forty hinder hoofs having
been flung in your face. You never can
catch the offender. Schoolboys are tame
beside them. Ere you can turn to look,
the meek creature has reversed his ears
and is industriously champing his prov
ender, seeming mildly to wonder how you
could have suspected him.
1t has long been known that there is
only one way by which mule can be
punished, and strange to say, that is by
strain upon his sensbilities. A mule by
himself is the wretchedest of beasts. He
may not be 50 particular about its quality,
but he must have companions compan-
ions to bite and kick and steal from, and
over whose back he can rest his intelli-
gent head to stare at the passers-by. Place
him in field over whose fence he really