The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1873-12-10
SCRAPS.

SCRAPS.
-Virginius was Roman, and the
Virgihius was roamer: ''
The ! same engine at Spencer,
Mass, grinds sausages and prints
;the;vilage paper.
An accomplished :barikeeper in
New Orleans mixes drinks in six
different languages. .
Two. Oil City bloods. club their
money and buy good suit, and
take turns in wearing it.
A San Francisco paper heads an
account of the fall Of trestle,
work, "Sancelito's Sad Sensation"
A lazy editor in Ohio reads all
his exchanges in bed: He finds it
the easiest wy to fill up his sheet
<Quiet, but firm. ':sWanted, by a
strong German, a situation in an
eating house. He understands the
bfsiness.'' 80 80
An Indiana woman held a bur-
glar by the whiskers until her hus-
band came home. Burglars should
shave often. 80 49, ''''
While Witnessing a game of
baseball oht West,,a boy was struck
ON the head, the bawl.' coming out
Of lis mouth. ''"' ;, "
"A. lady reporter, sent to an Agri-
cultural fair, WROTE Of a lot Of young
pigs: s:THe5y Took too sweet to live
"a minute"
A Burlington, Iowa, man bought
q little axe because his wife was
sick, and couldn't chop very well
with a heavy one.
Mrs. .Partington will not allow
Ike to play the guitar. She says
he had it once when he was a child
: and it nc: nearly: Fl < killed him.
=" ssA lass, a lass!" exclaimed an
old bachelor, who wanted to marry.
. "Alas! alas!' he cried, after he had
been married awhile. 80 -
A French lady, hearing that a
tunnel cost five thousand francs d
yard, importhned her husband to
buy her dress of that material.
Ask St. Louis man about Chi
caso, and, he*will admit there is
such a place in Illinois, but will
add, "It is all mortgaged to sBos2
ton" :. 80 '''.' ,.'' ~
When they told Jim Oxford, of
Virginia, that lie was dying, be re-
piled, "WaH,' don't forget to put
them shingles on the mule pen afore
it rainsagain." go 80
An Arkansas obituary notice:
81. P-.s, of Helena, on Monday,
Sd inst, aged fourteen years. His
last words we're: 4 didn't know It
= was loaded.'"- ,-'." 49,"
Our ofeflow townsman, John
, Knox, went galloping out. of Cen
;terville on pale horse last night"
is the gist Of affecting obituary no.
tice im a louisville paper:
Josh Billings says: "Diogenes
hunted hlthes day time for an hon
est man, with a lantern: if he had
lived in these times, he would have
, ',,eeded the he'd lite ov lokomo-
aifo" ! - 80 - -. e '''.,'':'
r,s sPay me that twenty-five cents
, , YOU ol owe me, y. roared a newsboy to
a bootblack. "Hav'nt got the. cur
rency, Jamcsy,"' responded the bur-
nisber; ssbut i can give you cer-
tilted check."l III 30
ARochester editor went hunting
the other day for the first time in
twenty-five years, and he was lucky
enough to bring down an Old farm
er by a shot in; the seg. The dis
tance was sixty-six yards.
A mar at Andoyer, Mass, does
not believe in the fall in prices, be-
Cause he has just sold for fifty cents
"a pocket.knite which he bought for
that price in 1909, and has used
steadily for sixty four years.
IL ~ Upon the outer wall of a neigh
boring female college the other
morning, was discovered, conspicu-
:" - = layed, the sign domestic
Sewing Machines" Some of those
specimens of total depravity known
as college students did it.
: IrasciAe old party-"Conductor,
why didn't you wake me as I asked.
:you?' Here I am miles beyond my
station" Conductor-'I did try,
sir, but all I could get out of you
was 'all right, Maria: get the chii-
dren their breakfast, and III be
down in i mipute."'' "'''' : .
~ A gentleman, in search of a man
k