Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-11-06
BREyITIES.

plain.
WHAT burns to keep secret? Sealing
wax, to be sure.
A MOLINE ull) German has Bible
that was printed in 1913.
MEN who live on the sea shore should
be able to "harbor thoughts"
A STONE AK weighing II pounds was
dug up at Freeport ILL.,, recently.
GREEN should be the prevailing color
for bed hangings and window drapery.
FIFTY new weekly newspapers have
been started in Nebraska within the past
year.
RIO COFFEE costs the importer 23c in
Brazil, and the same coffee is selling in
New York at &c.
"SAM, why am de dogs de most intelli-
gent folks in the world? ?" Because dey
nose ebryting."
CAPT. JACKS body isn't to molder in the
grave worth a cent, for he sold it in adj
| vance to an embalmer.
THERE is in Virginia City an old col
| ored man who has made about $4,000 in
the boot-biacking business.
II COME to STEAL" as the rat observed to
| the trap. "And | spring to embrace you,"
| as the trap replied to the rat.
| THE veto messages of Governor John A.
| Dix, in the year 1878, have been collected
and printed in a pamphlet.
| Four HUNDRED pensioners of the United
| States are resident in other countries, and
receive their pensions by bills of ex-
change.
MANY people in the world live by
| hook or by crook. They begin with the
| crook, and then the hook comes naturally
| enough.
| In the Philadelphia Post-office the mar
bic alone will cost nearly five millions
and a half. And it will not be done in
| time for the centennial.
In Dandy, Vt, is cavern which de-
sends into a solid rock, like well, and
! down which persons have been let $50
| feet without discovering the bottom.
MANY persons are capable of making
great sacrifices, but few are capable of
concealing how much the effort has cost
| Them and it is this concealment that con-
| stitutes their value.
PARAsoLs, to screen from the sun, were
| luxuries known to the Chinese and Tar
| tars as early as the fourth century, and
of dignity, and used only by persons of
rank.
SAID Mrs. jerks, on her return from
church. when [ see the shawls of those
Johnsons, and then think of what | have
to wear, if it was not for the consola-
tons of religion, | don't know what |
| would do.'
The young ladies of country seminary
are puzzled over the exact meaning of the
| following inscription, recently discovered
| thn Of ttn hi11tI iii
ladies should set good examples, for young
men will follow them"
A NEGRO held a COW while a cross-eyed
man was to hit her on the head with an
ak. The negro, observing the mans eyes,
| hit where YOU look?" yes" Den"
said Cuffee, "hold the COW yourself"
| AN unsophisticated farmer when asked
! by the paying teller of "a bank what de-
nomination he would have his bills in,
| replied, You may give me a sprinklin'
| of Presbyterian, but the heft on em III
| take in good Old Hard shell Baptist"
| An old farmer became seriously i'll, and
was urged by his neighbors, who thought
! he was going to die, to call in a minister
| to pray for him. "To pray for me! No,
| sir; | am an original Granger, and do not
| want any HllOule man between me anu
Almighty Godn'
| THE river Shannon is the largest salmon
| river in Ireland. 1t is frequented by the
| fish from its sources to the sea- is 100 miles
| in length, and has catchment basin of
| 4,553 square miles. 1t possesses at least
| fifty good tributaries, twenty-five of which
are frequented by the fish.
UPPER remarks that "a babe in the
| house is q well-spring of pleasure" and
| so, perhaps, it is; but there is time
| (Spilkins is our authority when it is as
| insutferable as funeral next door.
THAT" saith Spilkins, "is when it is
| awake
DIVINE WISDOM, intending to detain US
some time on earth, has done well
to cover with vail the prospect of our
life to come; for if our sight could clear
ly distinguish the opposite bank, who
would remain on this tempestuOus coast?
| Nine. de iStdeL.
LADIES in delicate health should 90 to
Colorado. The case of Mrs. Prather, of
Golden City, shows the wonderful restora-
| tive effects of the climate. She could not
even sweep her room when they lived in
Ohio; but in less than year after her
arrival in the territory she chased her
husband mile and quarter with pitch
| fork
| MIFFLIN, Ohio, has quite a curiosity in
the shape of a seven-hoofed colt, owned
by Mr.. Lemon, of that place. 1t has two
hoofs on the right front leg, and three
hoofs on the left; the hind legs and hoofs
are natural; and the colt is five months
old, and of large size and we'll developed
| CAMELs' hair promises to be again the
favorite material for handsome over
dresses and wraps. The camels' hair
worn last year will still be stylish.
though fresh importations of similar pat
| terms have so many of the loose hanging
hairs visible that the surface is positively
shaggy.
! A PAPYRUs manuscript found in an
Egyptian tomb has lately been translated
by scholar Of Heidelberg, who pro-
nounces it to be an address of Rameses
| Ill. to all the nations of the earth, detail
ing infinitely all the causes which led to
the exodus of the Jews from the land of
the Pharaohs.
| New HAMPSHIRE has a compulsory
school law, requiring that every person
having in custody child between eight
and fourteen years of age shall send it to
school at least twelve weeks in the year,
of which six shall be consecutive. The
| law provides that the child may be in
| structed at private school or at home.
A MAN who came down to Leavenworth
recently from st. Joe, to attend the fair,
mistookC Central Market for the Exposition,