Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1873-05-24

A Danbury man started for Greenwich, Fri
day, to see an iron fence. What he wanted to
see an iron fence for we don't know, and it
really makes no difference. He wanted to go
OF on the $50 train, so he hurried home to get
ready His wife and vicious outside woman
we're cleaning house, and 1t was some little
time before he could get his society suit ready. In
the meantime he opened fire on the largest half
o. a custard pie, holding it in his hand yelling
tor his things. When she brought his overcOat,
he set the pie in chair, to put on the coat, but
III his nervousness stepped on the end of a long
handled whitewash brush which was balanced
across pail, and the other end flew up and dis
charged about "A pint of the awful mixture over
the sofa, wallpaper, and his paintings and in
dlgnant wife. She made a remark and he con-
Iadicted it. Then lie sat down in the chair
where the pie was, and got up again with a
howl that would have melted the stOutest heart.
She wanted him to wait while she scraped of
the surplus, but he was too mad to converse in
words of more than one SYLLABLE, and started
for the depot, and boarded the train, and in the
seclusiOn of the baggage car removed the Of
lensive lunch: He got to Greenwich all right,
and looked at the fence. We hope he admired
IT. Then he started for home, but missed the
train, and as the next train was an express and
didn't stop at Greenwich, he was obliged to
walk to the draw bridge at Cos Cob or stay in
Greenwhich all night. So he walked up there
in the rain, but didn't mind il much as he had
an umbrella, and the pie vas pretty we'll dried
IN. When he got to Cos Cob, he stood up on a
fence to look at the scenery, and swear, when a
sharp gust Of wind took OF his hat and carried
1t across bog lot. Then he stepped down on the
another gust Of wind came along and turned
the umbrella inside out. A brief conversation
here ensued between himself ana the umbrella,
and he AGAIN sfarfad for tho hat NuLs. lac got
up 10 II ne kicked Ii around several times, and
then jammed ii down on his head and started
once more through the boys as the train drew
up at the bridge. 1t was terrible struggle, as
the bOgs were uncertain, but he strained and
coughed and spit, and howled, and swOre and
itdid seem as ii he would catch it after ALL What
he thought as he stood on that fence and
watched the train sail across the BRIDGE no
human being can tell. An hour later he an
peared in Stamford, wet through to the skin,
splashed with mud, and with an expression on
his face that would have scared q hydrant
Backing himself against the depot he stood
there until near midnight, and then went up on
the owl train to Norwalk, falling asleep in the
meantime, and narrowly escaping being carried
by the depot. Here he took the freight train for
Danbury, arriving at home just before daylight
His wife was abed but not sleeping. She Law
there torn by f0rebOdings, and harrassed by
suspense. Perhaps he was dead, and living on
the cold ground in the rain Then she Thought
Of his lifeless body, and grOaned; and thought of
the pie and groaned again. She knew his knock
the moment it sounded, and rushing down
stairs in the costume appropriate to that hour,
she threw herself into his hair, and historically
shouted, go, yon old rascal come in here
DdRbury News.