The Weekly Kansas chief. [volume] (Troy, Kan.) 1872-1918, 1873-09-11
ABB AsHLEY's FEAT IN MELON STEALING

Alb Ashley was real live HOosier, nOtoriou,
for everything in general, and stealing melons il
particular. In melon time, he was the dread d
the whole neighborhood; for when he visited
patch, he made it a rule never TO leave until il
was entirely destroyed. This was a singulal
trait in his Understanding unaccOuhtablt
for, aside from this, he was considered one Of
the hest fellows in the world. Stealing melons
and plunderng patches seemed to be part Of
his nature for it was evident that it did moi
arise from any niggardly disposition or selfish
motives. He was a real Open-hearted kind Of an
individual, always growing more melons than
anybody else, and giving them away more freely
than any body else. They were no object to him
yet he could not resist the temptation to steal
from his neighbors, just for the fun of the thing
But, as one has said, at is long lane thai
/ Las no turn" and likewise had Alb followed NJ
| the practice of stealing melons all his life, he
would have rot to he melon thiefOf long stand
| ing. But such state of things was not destined
tn last always-"A chSnge came over the spirit
of his dream" / recollect once, i'll melon sea
son, some three or four youngsters called at Aba
house, and after telling him of the Zine patch
| that Deacon Aikers had, proposed to visit.lr. Alb
was on hand without a moments hesitancy, ana
the company set out as il was fairly
| dark. Before proceeding further, may say of
Alb, in the language of the poet, ale loved wills
| key" well as he did melons; and as the boys
! in whose company he was had looked TO the flu
4
the good critter," he was soon enjoying himself
hugely. Round and round went the black bot
| tie, and on went the company. They got
| to be very merry-sO much 50 that apparently
| they paid no attention to road or path, but went
right through the woods and brush, the same as
if they had been walking on barn floor. At
length after winding about in various ways
and overcoming many obstacles, such fallen
trees and worm fences, that lay in their route
they arrived at the patch and pitched over the
| PurlOSurP We uDls what n siHhtt Thara law
the huge melons, thick that adventures
coud scarcely walk for them. There they lay,
great mealy ''red cores" apparently calling out
in their own language, "Arise, sosh and eat!"
They were none of your little long, "wizzled up
things, such find their way to the market
stands, and which one would suppose had fallen
from the vine in fit of the ''bue devils;" but
they were great, plump, jolly, good natured fell
lows, many of which were already showing their
red interior, having apparently burst their sides
with laughter. Alb was right in his glory, and
so, hauling out his jack-knife, he fell to sashing
around with vengence. The Others followed
his example, and very soon there was sad havoc
in the melon patch.
Having satisfied his appetite, Alb fell to stamp
ing and crushing open all that came in his way.
The other boys hesitated to participate Mt first,
urging that it was really too bad tn treat the old
deacon in such a manner; but Alb swOre that it
was good enough for the old hypOcrite, and he
would not leave long there was a melon
with a whole hide. Finding there was no stop
ninp him they lent n hand IN the nerfnrm anca
and very soon every melon was destroyed moi
only that INF the vines WEIR nnIled mn and bean-
ed in one corner of the match
snow " said All mounting the niIa which vos
son,a Eve ar siy f.af bigb ..riya ma The LIacL
bo.tls and lat M. dr;nE The old d.,oon,s ba.ItL
that cnnd man in honor of whom w. inst
erected this monument"
The bottle was passed mp, and Alb began
Deacon Aikers-May he live to plant many a
friends have the honor of barvestin, Il fnr him y
Hats went round three times after which the
bottIe started and mad. n Lille nnmbar of ravo-
lnt;nns
Now. fetch me that mole wonder till T erect n
standard IN show thar man has been In the snm-
mit. and the workrI he complete - said An.
The mole was brnncbt and after tsarinT a s,r;D
off an ala cotton banJkercbief and a,taebing y
TO the end of tbe mole. All stuck il mn in the nile
of vines. dismonnted and ali started for home.
In n spaee of time truly incredible. tbsv arrived
at All residsnce All messed his friends IN STOW
till morning bnt they wouId NOT hear of II Some
pressing bnyiness of course nreyented and an |
tbav ST ont Isa,;nr him 10 snooza off tha ia
effects of had wb;stey
EarIv n.xt morn,ng All AsbIav uas ororsad
from his somd sInmber by one az his II, tie sous
running IN his be,, and c,Ijing ont. aPana nana
nanaI e., mn OVERWHELMINGLY Some'p,s bopI |
Ell ali or T,tar ,n.IyonsIn
.Wba,,n exclaimed IN
"Why. some-some-some,n hooked aIrer wa
ter melyons. an,-an;-an' smashed ;em mi,