Bozeman avant courier. [volume] (Bozeman, Mont.) 1872-1882, 1873-04-04
;AvaatGoalrieT
New Married Men-What they
Have to Come to.

l. Just married; destined to live in clover
new mown hay. AM such heritage from min,
10 twelve months. Then---
,. Some black. rascal.y, stormy night
YOU arc tarncd out into the streets, ponds
and nfll-raccs. or amid snow eighteen inches
deep, and drifting Ii blazes. and told to run
for the doctor. When you get lack home,
eighteen chances to ten, little red thing,
about thc size of big merile potato awaits
you. srhey cali 1t a baby; and packed up
with 1t YOU Will lind the first real squalls OF
married life-you can bet on that.
3. Para seric, and soothing syrup, and
rcatnip tea, and long flannel, and diaper stuff,
and baby Ssalico-they Will come along too; in
fact, they will become just as much at home
in the house us dinner. Then
"A. One of these nights, in r a Ia
SIN the wee sma' hours ayont the twal,
YOU will tur1 out again. Barefoot, and icy,
,lisconsoIate, sense of dalnpness about you,
only a cotton shirt Or such q matter between
YOU anu the distressed openness Of a cane
bottom chair, you will distractedly rock that
baby back and forth, and bob it up and down,
singing meanwhile, with voice like wild
OK in straightforward: u
% This thing is playing cut, Mary
Rock o'bye baby on a tree top"
or some shch melody. And all the time that
baby yeils. Oh, doscn't he yell while Mary
Ann US to her nose under the warm bed
covers, to help outevery now and then, inn
patiently puts in just the wrong time. why
don't you trot him faster, Slmue?'
And you trot him-oh, how you trot him !?
Thelittle innocent seems tougher than an
India rubber car spring. ttsa# .,..55 .1 E
Just rs your are about giving mp, tomclhtl-
Ing that you must freeze, that there will GER
tainfy have to be funeral in the family
inside of thirty-six hours; baby willis from
sheer exhaustion, and then. with teeth chat
tering like u Mccormick reaper, you crawl
in by Mary Ann; and try TO sleep again.
5. Gradually you glide away into a
tangled maze OF ice, camomile, more ice,
skating weather, steam-whistle voiced babies,
.jocky clubs. sleigh rides. crinoline as i'm
mense as the old bell at NJ seow, Indian am
bdscakes, snow stormsaand forty other equal |
y cheerful things, suddenly. ........
g. snort, a thrash, a wild throwing up |
OF little arms and legs. and then, keen and |
shIiIl comes that terrible s.ah-waah ah-w-
a-a! y again. I guess you wake up, don't
you? 80 VI @ o.
Get the paragoric and teaspoon, quick ~
sys Mary Ann. in a sharp, staccato tone, and
don't you get it quick 9.
Injustthre-eigh of second you are a
Grecian bend out there on the cold floor,
dropping paragoric into teaspoon.
Hurry! Gracious little Peter describing
curves with all the arms and legs
he's got, and screams one hundred pounds to
the square inch, and Mary Ann, rearing
around there in the bed making 4 rocking
chair Of her back, Aand yelling BY. by. O.
Co.," like wild Comanche on the war path.
Oh, no; circumstances are rot such as to
make you hurry any. BIO 0st'
And then to think as days and perhaps
years roll on. there has got to be more end
..':s.. - ~---i Is ----F--" '.~-i..
Nj e, ai.'tit?