Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1873-08-07

IT is considered . big thing in in Sara
lunch, or "munch," AZ itis eleeap1y
champagne with them. and expect TO
get home alive: : =. cs7b';f,
A DEsPA1R1Na American; in Strasburg
recently exclaimed, "Dont ask me to
see sights I am no longer SEE :sitk,
but sick Of sight Please, introdoce.iAe
to somebody who talks English, and
who won't ask me to see anything.
A SrRAsBuRo, Pa, girl agreed to Kiss
a young man every day for two yeaEs1f
he would stop smoking: He quit, apd
has smacked regularly for six months,
but the girl has taken to eating om-
obs, and he is unhappy. Young man,
neutralize, by chawing few yourself.
1.-THE cheerful crack of the pistol,
and the inspiring groans Of the DYING"
remarks the Register, ofCentral City,
Colorado, " enliven the streets of Fair
play almost, making it very evident
that the lost arts of 80 and go are
reviving in that altitudinous mining
camp"
A WRITER in the Temps, discussing
the origin of the word shah, says "a
last remark which I dedicate to chess
players. Do they know the origin Of
the word che ckmate 2 It is q literal
translation of the Arabic tEs- cheikh
inaat-the sheikh (king is dying"
WHEN q crowd of jayhawkers started
disturbance in Texas church, The
other day, the preacher, raised up =
shotgun and sald:,. William Dello,
sit down, or I'll make it painful fol-
YOU" William sat down and WAS. as
quiet as alamb. ..,...,.
SEVERAL passengers on the Lower
Mississippi were attracted by the alli-
gators basking in the sunshine. ;4.Are
they amphibious, captain r. asked a
locker on. "Amphibious HI :" an
swered the enthusiastic officer
''they'l eat hog in minute -: :,
COB! the skeeter, the beautiful
skeeter, filling the air with melodious
meter. Under our hat and tickling our
nose, taking bite through q hole ip
our clothes. In through the window,
opening the door, filing our chamber
aud singing the sweeter, ever found the
uDtiring moskeeter. ,,.,-, .-t
A BOY and a girl Cloth quite sma1D,
living in Providence, were playing
graveyard" the other day, tie girl
bringing out her dolls for buriale, and
the boy digging the graves. Afeef dis
posing of one or two, the boy reutarked
that sit was a healthy old graveyard
without trees"
A DEALER in artificial eyes, Who
thought to find . handsome business
opening in the far West, has been ut
terly ruined, it is said, by a competi-
Tor, who has devised q process of hard
ening and preserving the unclaimed
natural optics which are swept out, of
The different barrooms every morniing,
Two STRANGERS approaching Boston
over the Lowell railroad, recently. had
to regret the near proximity
Of Miller's River to the track, when
one remarked, "That will sure bring
The cholera" "Oh, no." said. the
other, ':It smells strong enough to
drive it away Hs.F57E 80
"WHy is it that 80 many min are
with brain diseases Of late r.
asked . gentleman. In this tele:-
graphic. high-pressure age, repieda
friend, "there a1e q great man more
things to occupy ones attention than
there were twenty years ago, but the
brains amt any bigger now than they
were then" ~
THE most wonderful fish story out
comes from Sodus. A Palmyra lady
was trolling in the Bay, when q 'fish
took her hook. Just rs the lddy was
about to take the fish into the. boat,
her gold plate dropped from her mouth
into the water. The f,h shook the
spoon from his month, took the plate
Of teeth and disappeared in the deep
water. ~"
PUNCH gives the following exmpsea-
ling instance of "clerical presnmp-
lion :" Coal mine overloOkef (to curate)
10 can assure you. sir, that these
ere GOLFERS, now they're in full work,
can make their ten an twelve shillin' q
day Z" Curate-" Dear me! All! it's
more than I get! Why, it's
more than I get!"
WORDSWORTH" said Charles Lamb.
g one day told me that he considered
greatly overrated. There
is, said he, ian immensely of trick in
all Shakespeare wrote, and people are
taken by it. Now, if 1 had a mind 1
could write exactly like Shakespeare.
So you see" proceeded Charles Lamb
quietly, g it was only the mind that
was wanting"
ON Friday morning. the 18th inst.
one of the most famous jewelers. of
Paris exhibited his collection Of jewels
to the Shah, who purchased for 6OO, 600
francs u collar of pearls, aud for
IS, 600 francs for a diamond bracelet,
intended for the wife of Marshal
MacMahon. He also purchased many
articles for his harem. He tried on
his Grand Vlzier everything shown
him, giriles, collars and aigrettes. He
afterwards examined arms of various
models, ahd was about to fire one from
the window, when he was reminded by
tho Grand Vizier that he might wound
some Que. The Shah laughed and put
aside the rifle.
: LULLY, the composer, was dangerous
" ill. A confessor told him there Was
only one way by which he could obtain
absolution, and that was burning all
that he had composed of an unpub-
lished opera. Lully burnt the music.
On his recovery y nobleman said:
"You have burned Your opera, and
you are really suoh blockhead.
"Stop, my friend, stop" said Lully,
whispering IN his ear, I snow very
we'll what was about! I have another
copy"