The Somerset press. [volume] (Somerset, Ohio) 1873-1977, 1873-10-31
NUMBER 20.
Beefsteaks for Eiiniste IS.

with such grand work as saving souls,
the ministry should ever be nerveless.
Some ascribe it to lack of piety, and some
to timidity Of temperament We be-
lieve that in a great number of cases il
is from the lack of nourishing food.
Many Of the clerical brotherhood are on
low diet. After jackets and sacks have
been provided for the eight or ten chill
dren Of the parsonage, the father and
mother must watch the table with
severest economy. Coming in suddenly
upon the dinner-hour of the country
clergyman, the housewife apologies for
what she calls "a picked-up" dinner,
when, alas. it is nearly always picked
up.
Congregations sometimes mourn over
dull preaching when themselves are to
blame. Give your ministers more beef
steak, and he will have more fire. Next
TO the divine JUNCTION, the minister needs
blood, and he cannot make that out Of
tough leather. One reason why the
apostles preached so powerfully was
that they had healthy food. Fish was
cheap along Galilee, and this, with un-
bolted bread, gave them plenty of phos-
phorus for brain-food The early min
listers were never invited out 10 late sup
pers, with chicken salad and doughnuts
Nobody ever embroidered slippers for
the big foot Of SImcn Peter, the fisher
man preacher. Tea parties, with hot
wafies, at ten O'Clock at night, make
namby-pamby ministers; but good hours
and substantial diet, that furnish nitrates
for the muscle, and phosphates for the
brain, and carbonates for the whole
frame, prepare a man for effective work.
Z When the water is low the mill-wheel
goes slow; but a full race, and how fast
the grisfs are ground. In a man. the
arteries are the mill-race, and the brain
the wheel; and the practical work Of life
/ is the grist ground. The reason our
soldiers failed in some Of the battles was
because their stomachs had for several
days been innocent of everything but
| "hardtack." See that your minister has
full haversack Feed him on Cruel
during the week, and on Sunday he will
give you Cruel. What is called the
4 "parson's nose" in turkey or fowl is an
allegory setting forth that in many COM
muBities the minister comes out behind.
Eight hundred or thousand dollars
/ for a minister is only slow way of kill
/ ing him, and is the worst style of homi-
eide. Why do not the trustees and
elders take mallet or an axe, and with
one blow put him out of his misery?
The damage begins in the college
boarding house. The theological student
has generally small means, and he must
go to a cheap clearinghouse. A frail
piece of sausage trying to swim across
a river Of gravy on the breakfast plate,
4 but drowned at last; "The linked sweet
ness long drawn out" Of flies in the mo-
/ lasses cup; the gristle Of a tough OK, and
and mcasily biscuit, and buckwheat
cakes tough as the cooks apron, and old
peas in which the bugs lost their life
before they had time to escape from the
saucepan, and stale cucumbers cut up
/ into small slices of cholera morbus, are
the provenJer out of which we are trying
at Princeton and Yale and New Bruins
wick to make Sons of Thunder. Sons
of mushl From such depletion we step
gasping into the pulpit, and look so
heavenly pale that the mothers in Israel
are afraid we will evaporate before we
get through our first sermon.
Many of our best young men in pre-
paration for the ministry are going
through this martyrdom. The strongest
mind in our theological class perished,
the doctors said afterward, from lack Of
food. The only time he could afford a
doctor was for his post-mortem examin-
alton.
I give the financial condition of many
of our young theological students when
| say
Income 90
| Outgo:
Board at 50 per weel; ;.................
/ Clothing (sloddy) .................... 100 90
Books (no moroco) ................ % GO
Travelling expenses. 2000
Total. .......................S3Ol 90
Here you see a deficit of fifty-one dol
lars. As there are no "stcalings" in
theological seminary, he makes up the
balance by selling books or teaching
school. He comes into life cowcd down,
with patch on both knees and several
other places, and a hat that has been
"done over" four or five times. and so
weak that the first sharp wind that whis-
ties round the corner blows him into
glory. The inertness you complain of
in the ministry starts early. Do you
suppose that, if Paul had spent seven
years in a cheap boarding house, and the
years after in a poorly supplied parson-
4 age, he would have made Felix tremble.
Nol The first glance Of the Roman
procur- Or would have made him apol-
ogize for intrusion.
Do not think that all your eight-hun-
dred dollar minister needs isa Christmas
present of an elegantly bound copy Of
"CaIvin's Institutes" He is sound al
ready on the doctrine of election, and it
Is 6 poor consolation if in this way you
remind him that he has been foreordain-
ed to starve to death. Keep your min
lister on articholcs and purslain, and he
will be fit to preach nothing but funeral
sermons from the text All aesh is grass. ."
While feeling most of all our heed Of
the life that comes from above, let us
not ignore the fact that many of the
clergy to-day need more gymnastics,
more fresh air, more nutritious food.
Prayer cannot do the work Of beef
steak You cannot keep hot fire in
the furnace with poor fuel and the
damper turned Tdlmage.
A HIoH-PRcED HoRsE.-Mr. +. y.
Simmons has purchased the trotting