Lexington weekly intelligencer. (Lexington, Mo.) 1871-1887, 1873-11-26
CuRAP Vols (,AsuI. |.


IbD w 3Uta o00 Ih4<fIY4
rss GsCELLAHE0us.
frfss ssilssnf 49, .-..- = y 'NSS.S Nfeg
vAsi 10 10 bs2--A verb.
A isst friend telegraph
Tho eiild who cried for an hsss
didn't xct'it. ~
The eager anxiety with which girls
. rush 10 the seaside suggests the arse
stage Of . rubber ~ wI,ist. They
cut for partners. N
st~rhey people at Omaha are various.
" andplcssaMtly alluded TO by. out.
sidcrs Nc "OmnhcE.,''..so asaLo osscs,' p
"Onaliorribies," etc.
"Protectcl Viscera" 10 the new
name for patent insides. westssu
publishers arc IN fair way TO wear
out the dictionary. La
A French writer has described 8,
young lady ~ . creature that esasss
70 kiss gentlemen 1t tuslSs asd -.
gins agsln'as twenty .sas6f
j MiehIran-moouitght 10 dIK1tf06s,
We should judge, from the slatsmsst
that "two men were robbed In Naa.
chester, Mich, by moonlight" 's
In . letter to . friend, q young lady
of Illinois states that she 10 not en-
gagged, but she secs cloud above tho
horizon about - large asa name
baud.
California agriculturists are going
largely into ginger. They haven't
got much beyond tho fret syllable
yet, but hope to do SO when their
plants germiuatc.
The Danbury News man has dedi.
Gated his almanac to "that distins
guished co-lab6ser In the field OF
meteorological horoscopy, inhammar
tory rheumatism"
Such is the force Of habit. A res
porter writes love story, in which
the hero "ciaspcd tie pl epossessipg
girl 10 his bosom, and spok substan.
tially u fellows"
Western women arc grumbling
terribly because the managers Of the
agricultural fairs don't give at least
a years notice when they offer priscs
for the finest babies.
An Iowa newspaper proclaims
itself al "honcst newspaper" and in
another paragraph says, "When .
man processes honesty nowadayl
keep your eye peeled for thief"
The Congregationalist has seen this
item IN y late invoice OF fashionable
New York furniture: elegantly
upholstered kueeliug bcuches Cor
the weary and heavy laden"
The rallyiug cry in Kansas, upon
which newspapers Of divers views
are unanimous is: "L.ct no man b
electA to office who owes over i've
years, subscription to u local paper"
Mourning over the late election re-
turns, is the editor Of the Iowa -
-. After much brown study hs
lias n ri,,eu out these words: "Mhis.
Ky did it.'-lpavcnport Democrat.
Some Lase calumniator Gays: "Ths
India, fret CO lei the place ON
which New York was built Mana.
hachi aniencks. The translation Of
l. is Hhu pl'ce where they all got
drunk"
Respect for oil age never had o
brighter illustration than in the case
Of u young la,ly who always refuses
to 20 10 tho wash-tub when her
mother or grandmother 10 present.
Prof. +. a. Sophocles, of Harvard
college. 10 goiny to Europe fora few
months visit. prnbably to eco old
Damoc!es, Pcriclcs, Ripidcs, Cau.
thard,rs aud other Suchasthesc.
General washtngton's family Bible
10 advertised FOR sale. II 10 Ia three
large quarto volumes, aud the public
aru gravc,y informed that Il was pre-.
ecn,cd TO Gen. Washington by the
author.
"Miss Q -" said a gentleman, QUE
evening. "why are ladies so fond Of
n,Recrss" "llow nupid" replied
Miss C-s "is Il not natural aud
proper ,N~, u ady should Ike y good
offer, siry"
A paper ra,led the taterior 10 pub.
lished Al Stanford, Ky, aud . cor.
respondent says that trem his Enewl.
r,lse OF tho editor, he Il "euablad to
state positively ,hs, he will throw .
srea, deal Of spirit Mto hls Lutte.
rlor,"
4 eowarily fellow having kicked
a newshoy Cor res,erins hiM to buy
an evening paper, tho lad waited til
another hoy aecus,ed the "gentle.
man," and then shouted In hearlng Of
all bys,anders, "lt's no use TO Try
lin, Jim, he can't read"
They have aoms very smart bssl.
ness men IN New Jersey. Last week
u Young mau was struck by iigh,ains
in ilcll near Trenton, aud when the
people began to fock to the spot to
look at the victim, they found = man
.,aad,n. by the corpse trying to ssM
lig ghtniug rods to tho crowd.
"unlcss you give mo add" said .
beggar to q benevolent lady, ~ sm
afraid ] shall have TO resort TO some.
thing which l greatly dislike to do"
Tho lady handed him dollar, aud
asked, "What isit
poor man, that ] have saved yo1
from?" "Work," was the mournful
answer.