The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1873-05-29
The Genus Landlord.



That amusing writer, Anna Brackettj
says this genus is very peculiar 1t
has something which it thought 1t did
not want at present, and had deter
imned to dispose of it temporarily; but,
as soon as a demand is made for it, the
landlord is not quite sure whether, on
the whole, he does not want it himself,
or would not rather let it be idle than
make only two per cent on his invest
ment. Pending the settlement of this
unimportant question, however, he in
quires! .,
"What security can you offer for the
payment of the rent ?" References
being given him, he notes them all, and
Immediately after leaving you secures
the written guarantee of four wealthy
men for the payment of your modest
rent of $780, But he proceeds to in
terrogate:
"How many in the family?'
"Five," answered E.
Give! Too few. So few people in
large house have too much room, and
move round SO much they really do
much more damage than more. | al
ways pack portmanteau full II don't
want things spoiled. Five. Any child
rem ?"
"Three," answered E., apologetically.
"Can't think of it, L want to let it
only to a strictly adult family"
Every WELL" said E., promptly,
"Good day, sir"
"Stop one moment. Three, did you
say? All girls ?"
"No; all boys"
"Three boys! Grown up, did you
Probably not" answered E., "as
we were talking of children"
ooh! yes. Excuse me. I was think
ing of something else. What broker
did you say offered you the house ?"
"Smith," answered E., who really
did want the house, and besides was
amused at the man.
every strange! [ only asked for my
own protection. I did not give the
house to Smith at all. You are sure it
was Smith ?"
"Ouite sure" said E. 81 rather
think we had better look elsewhere.
cone moment. l trust those boys
of yours never play ball. l have had
walls spoiled by having balls thrown
against them, and l could on no account
think of letting my house to family
who allowed ball playing"
1 assured him that the balls were
made of white leather, and thoroughly
washed every night.
That alters the case" said he,
Perhaps that might do. I must go tc
Philadelphia to consult my sister, who
owns the house with me, and will tele.
Or Or / not, ( day y after Tomorrow. + "shaI
consider you in honor bound to take il
if 1 telegraph. You will understand
the rent is to be paid monthly i'll ad
vance,"
Without waiting reply, he movet
majestically away; and we, having
seen that play played ott sufficiently
turned into another brokers' office t(
consult other lists and start again.
a special messenger met us at on
hotel, as we re-entered it, that evening
direct from the Jersey City ferry, will
a note from the landlord above referred
to, written just as the cars were abou
to start. 1t ran thus:
"DEAR SIR--ln the event of my tele
graphing that you can take my house,
shall require a written stipulation t.
the effect that no company shall eve
be invited to stay more than six hour
at time. Yours, truly,
JOHN STEIN"
"P. S.-You will, of course, not oil
iect to inserting in the lease this clause
'All pastry to be eaten in the kitchen
and not in the dining groom j. s..
eff there is one thing l like to sc
in a man," said E., to me the next da,
"it is care for his property. 1t is thi
thrift that makes the Tuetonic elemen
whether German, Swedish or Norw,
gian, so valuable to American citizens
The observation seemed to me a va
5 liable one. L therefore note it down
: though irrelevant.