The New York herald., 1873-07-01
(l|!4!'
Mark Twain Sets Out to empress" the
liking Of Kings"
TERR0RS OF THE UNDERTAKING
Gloomy Views and Forebodings
Leaving London.
SHOCKING DISCOVERY AT DOVER.
OstendtatiOus Remarks on Flanders
and the Founders.
AFREsHET OF CHILDREN
Distressing Experience in a
Flemish Hotel.
A PAINSTAKING LANDLORD.
The Man of Mark Ready to Bring
Over the O'Shah.
The Man of Mark Ready to Bring
Over the O'Shah.
THE LIVELY" AND "vIGILANT. u
First Appearance Of the Boss Monarch
and the Brimless stovepipes.
A CHEER AND A RECOGNITION.
Mark Twain Gets VShah on Board and Pro-
ceeds with Him to Hold HiDgland.


LONDON, June Is, 1873.
.'woula you ike to go over to Belgium and help
bring the Shah to Englandf'
said was willing.
every well, then; here is an order from the Ad-
miralty which will admit you on board Her Majes-
sy's ship Lively, now lying at Ostend, and you
can return in her day after tomorrow"
That was all. That was the end of it. without
stopping to think, had in manner taken upon
myself to bring the Shah Of Persia to England. I
could not otherwise regard the conversation had
just held with the London representative of the
NEW YORK HERALD. The amount Of discomfort
endured for the next two or three hours cannot be
set down in words / could not eat sleep talk,
smoke with any satisfaction. The more thought
the thing over the more oppressed felt. What
was the Shah to me, that l should 60 to all this
worry and trouble on his account Where was
there the least occasion for taking upon myself
such responsibility If got him over all right,
well. But IL lost him if he died on my hands
II he got drowneds 1t was depressing, any way
looked at 1t. In the end l said to myself 'If
] get this Shah over here safe and sound
never will take charge of another one." And yet,
at the same time, kept thinking "This country
has treated me well, stranger as 1 am, and this
foreigner is the country's guest-that is enough,
will help him out will fetch him over; will
land him in London, and say to the British people,
Here is your shah give me receiptr"
GEOGRAPHICAL INQUIRIES.
felt easy in my mind now, and was about to go
60 bed, but something occurred to me. took
cab and drove down town and routed out that
HERALD representative.
'.where is BelgumY' said l.
..where is Belgium? / never heard such ques.
tionr'
ssThat doesn't make any difference to me, II
have got to fetch this Shah don't wish to 60 to
the wrong place. Where is Belgium Is it a shil-
ling fare in a cab ~
He explained that it was in foreign parts-the
nrst place have heard OF lately which body
could not go to in a cab for a shilling.
Isaid could not go alone, because could not
speak foreign languages well, could not get up In
time for the early train without help and could
not nnd my way. said it was enough to have the
Shah on my hands; did not wish to have every
fhing piled on me. Mr.. Blank was then ordered to
10 with me. was not so ignorant as appeared,
put do like to have somebody along to talk to
when 60 abroad.
THE GREAT NATIONAL coNUNDRUM.
When 1 got home l sat down and thought the
Shing all over. wanted to go into this enterprise
Understandings. What was the main thing That
was the question. A little rejection informed me.
For two weeks the London papers had sung just
one continual song to just one continual tune and
the idea OF IL all was chow to impress the shah.'
These papers had told all about the st. Peters
burg splendors, and had said at the end that
splendors would no longer answer that England
could not outdo Russia in that respect: therefore
some other way of impressing the Shah
mast be contrived. And these papers had
also told all about the Shahstic reception in
Prussia and its attendant military pageantry.
England could not improve on that soreof thing
she could not impress the Shah with soldiers
after column, page after page of agony about how
TO Empress the Shah.'' AT last they had hit upon
q nappv idea-a grand naval exhibition. That
was 1t man brought up in Oriental seclusion
and simplicity, man who had never seen any
thing but eamels and such things, could not help
being surprised and delighted with the strange
novelty of ships. The distress was at an end.
England heaved great sigh OF relief; she knew at
last how to impress the Shah.
My course was very plain, now, after that bit Of
reelection Ali had to do was TO go over to Belgium
and impress the Shah. failed to form any dennite
plan as to the process but l made up my mind to
manage 1t somehow. / said to myself. ~ will I'M
press this Shah or there shall be funeral that will
be worth contemplating"
MANS MHUMASIrY TO MAN, ETC.
Iwent to bed then, but did not sleep great deal,
nufor the resnonsih,ias velGhipg pretty heavily