The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1873-11-27
MAX ADLER's HUMoR.

afeW evenings ago be called FOL, the pur.
pose Of making formal proposal Mss
Sniyely, it woull appear has bad other
and rather unfortunate love atf,irs in the
mast, aud a melancholy experience has
.de her sngularly cautious Aftor talk.
isy with her for awhile, Bellows hemmed
and hlw,d aud blushcd and then sudden.
" seiziug her hand. be was about to to
plamp the question right out when Miss
snivoly interrupted him.
"Ah, excuse mo for asking you, Mr.
Bellows, but are you going to propOse?'
Amazed and somewhat bewilderod, Mr..
Bellows replied.
"Well I.-tLnt is should say-that |
did perhaps cherish some --some-as it
we're, some-idoa, that is to say-wclI,
yes"
ooh, very we'll, rejoiued Miss Snively,
livery we'll, but just wait moment, please,
while call my aunt down stairs
"Wh.Wh .wh-what for?" asked Bellows,
in establishment.
"Why so that can have wittcss in case
I'm obliged to sue you for breach Of
promise Of course. Tho last man who
proposed got Otf; hut | reckon you wOO'tif
l know how to 6z things, Wait miu
ute." Aud then as Miss sniVely went out
10 search Of Der aunt, Bellows emerged 10
to the entry and glidCd through the front
door And naShing bis bat down over
bis eyes be dissipated bis loves Young
dream s!iaed bis grief, bit off an iuordi. !
uately large piece Of tobacco and went
hOue to bed. Miss Snivey will not sue
Just after Mrs. Rumble was married
she went to housekeeping, She was en-
!irely ignorant of the art and wholly un.
familiar With the utensils with which it
was conducted, and Mr.. Rumble was no
wiser. Mrs. Rumble's mother ordered
her furniture and things for the house,
and on the third day after they arrived
Rumble came home and found his wife
mad. THAT outrageous, uDprincipled
stOre.keeper, knows | am inexperienced,
she said, land be has tried to impose on
me, William. He has sent up 4 tin wash,
basin full of holes, so that il leaks awful
y. Flo must think I'm simple if he be-
lieves TN going to keep such a thing as
that" William desired to sooit, aud Mrs
Rumble went into the Kitchen aud brought
out-s cnlauier. Mr.. Rumble examined
it and suggested that it might perhaps be
Worm.eaten. But he said it was a scan.
dalous rand anyhow, aud he put on his
bat, wrapped tho coaader in paper aud
went to see the man about it, When he
came home, he had the colander with him
and be maintained gloomy silence, as
be soused 1t down on the Kitchen table,
and refused to explain about it; but Mrs
Rumble obtained the necessary informa.
ton in subsequent interview with her
mother. She thinks now perhaps William
would be happier il she had more init
mate familiarity with colanders aud such
things.
Old Mrs. Hillsgrass read in one Of the
papers that "a globe Of gold ish hanging
in the sun, in the window Of house 10
Maine, set the easement on fire Most
persons would have understood that the
globe. filled with water. acted as a burn.
iug,glass; but Mrs Hilcgrass is pnnicky
aud apt to jump at conclusions. She in.
stautly conceived 40 idea thatit had just
been discovered that fsh have an inaam.
matOry aud explosive tendency, which
render them as dangerous as guupowder
or coal oil Then she suddenly threw down
the newspaper, called the servant girl, aud
proceeded to the cellar. where she found
maCkerel and four Codisbcakes. These
she carried upstairs, at arms length, on
ashovel. aud put under the pump. while
Mary Jane turned on the water and wet
the incendiary substances thoroughly
After which Mrs Hllegrass buried the
mackerel and the 6sh.caEeS at the foot Of
the garden. aud came up to the house SO
nearly out Of breath that sue could hardly
remark 10 Mary Jane, "I'm not agoiu' to
have ibis house made a smokin ruin in
my old age by auy Of them dsh i'll never
eat another herrin'. You hear me, Mary
Jone7n