The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1873-05-01
CFrOm the B.
The Best Book 1

Judge l., repeating the quesIfofr4SaSsst. teSy Sv1
on entering his Office as law student.
That's the best book to read first, and
last too" he added, laying his hand on a
well-thumbed King James Bible" on
which less dust had been suffered to ac-
cumulate than 1 have seen on a pro
fessor's" parlor table
But l didn't come here to learn to
preach" l answered. little pertly.
"Yes you did, answered the Judge.
"And the better you preach every time
you get before jury, the better you'll
succeed"
"Tll prove it" said he quickly, noticing
my look OF incredulity.
And wheeling around in his chair;
bringing his leg to cross, and using his
ear for pen-rack, he proceeded:
"The first year after my admission I
was elected States Attorney My maiden
case was one of petit larceny.-Bill
Dawkes, one of the trifling good sort of
fellows-so called because good for
nothing-was found in recent possession
of carcass of mutton, which the owner
had left out over night, and which was
non est, that is to say, turned up missing
in the morning.
l drafted the indictment with great
care, charging with painful particularity,
that one William Dawkes, not havin g
the fear, ETC., but moved and seduced by
certain parsonage whom it was common
to include in every Indictment as an
accessory before the fact" on ETC., at
etc, one carcass of mutton of the value,
etc., of the goods, chattels, and personal
property of one Pelatiah Potts, out of
the possession, and against the will of
the said Pelatiah, feloniously and with
force of arms, did steal, take and carry
away.
Whats the matter?" l asked sharply,
when my friend Bob c. burst out laugh
ing on hearing me read over this, my
first professional production.
It's the best joke of the seasonp said
Bob with another guffaw.
What is itY
why, that pun-calling sheep thief,
yeoman:
my Office was the scene of confusion
at the end Of five minutes. Bob's head
had gone through the glass door of my
bookcase, two of my three chairs lay
with broken legs; and Bob and l had a
pair of black eyes between US It was
more than month before. either of us
spoke to the other.
"But I'm wandering from the point. In
due time the prisoner was brought up
for trial, Old POLLOK appearing for the
defense
'Old P. was character. The only law
book he had ever read was Swan s
Treatise for Justices of the Peace but
in that and the Scriptures he was pow
erful He had way of quoting and
applying the latter, which, in religious
community, made it difficult to oppose
him without incurring suspicion of
orthodoxy. His forte lay in carrying the
jury, whom he generally succeeded in
convincing that he and they were on one
side, and his adversary on the other
His style and grammar were original. -
II had set my heart on winning that
case. If l could only beat old POLLOK
before jury my cap would be feathered
81 had carefully written out my open
ing, and when l read it over to Nellie
Wynne. to whom was paying my atten-
tention at that time, she said it was real
nice which / knew was feminine for
'bully'-an encomium l felt not a little
proud of.
when the case came off. i, spoke my
piece without a blunder. L cited many
many authorities that he in whose pos
session stolen property is found soon
after the theft, is in law presumed to be
the thief was prepared to prove, |
said, that the property in question had
disappeared at the dead hour of night,
when all honest people were in their
beds, and had been found at early dawn
in the smoke house of Dawkes, the de-
fendant.
II put my witness on the stand, and
proved the ownership, value, and identity
of the property, its mysterious disap
pearance and subsequentr reappearance in
the constructive possessesslon OF the
prisoner, and rested.
"Old POLLOK sat in solemn silence, his
eyes closed, and his red bandanna over
his head He asked no questions and
called no witnesses. ] was disappointed
at the old fellow giving in so easily. 1t
would take away half the glory of the
triumph.
but | was reckoning without my host
"Old Polifox slowly got upon his legs.
and removed the bandanna, and taking
up the Bible on which the clerk had
sworn the witness, began,
AZ am grieved, my breethring,-he
always called the jury his "breethering
| am grieved and sore amazed to hear
such heathenish doctrines in q Christian
Court House as we've jest been listenin'
to- What sez the sakred volume l hold
in my hand2 Why it sez, "At the mouth
of two witnesses let every matter be
established" Now, my breethring, let
me ask what two witnesses-what one
witness seed my client hook this sheep
Echo answers, nary one My delooded
Young brother has read profane authors
to show that fndin' of goods on the
wrong mans premises, is proof of his
stealin EN-. It's presumption of law :
he says, and q great piece of presump-
tiOn IL 10 NV hreatharinu Now in this