Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1873-05-03

which he spoke He told me that soon
after he had apparently recovered from
his wounds he began to suffer from pains
in his heads, which Increased in severity
till they had become so agonizing that he
had recourse to oplates TO alleviate them.
But had not come 10 consult you about
this,' he said, this l can bear-must
bear. Would to God that they were al
ways tearing me The worst is when
they are not
'"They leaYe you very weak1' 1
suggested.
"They leave me, he replied, quite
calmly, 'with burning, all but uncon-
querable, desire to take human lifs.'
am not generally a nervous man,
but l started, and looked around for some
weapon of defense. Don't be afraid,
he continued, with sad smile, the NJ is
not on me now. should not have come
If II had been. ] have been nearly
starved once or twice, not daring to leave
my room. / can conquer my madness
now the question ls how long I can con-
tinue to do so I feel that 1t Is growing
upon nie. feel my power Of resistance
becoming weaker and weaker-the cray
lug of blood getting stronger and stronger.
am like man who has slipped over a
precipice, and feels the earth and shrubs
TO which he cliugs, slowly, slowly, surely,
surely, giving way with him. I have
brought wfetched ours out OF the street,
and killed them in my frenzy, In the hope
TO exhaust 1t on them. 1t is no use. /
must have human life
"Any human life | inquired, 'or
some one IN particular
Z" "Why do you ask this, Doctori' he
cried getting suddenly excited.
"' No'matler; 20 on.'
go Sometimes he resumed, 1t seems
that any life would do and sometimes
Doctor, four days before saw you met,
upon New Jersey ferryboat, a young
girl. So pretty, so refined, and nice |
followed her to her home-the devil, .hat
has taken possession me, led me. She
went in, and soon came out again Into
her little garden aud tended her flowers
poor child Doctor, Il | had had a
pistol with ME should have shot her.
Yon may smile; but some day soon
shall take pistol on purpose, ,and shoot
her.
at was clearly no use arguing with
him. The best way with such people is
to admit their facts and try to work round
them.
"' Then - said l, the only thing you
can do is TO submit to the restriction OF
an asylum, till this feeling has passed.
at will not pass. If were to go to a
madhouse should sham sane, sooner
or later their vigilance over me would
be relaxed. Then shonld murder my
keeper, and go straight for that Innocent
girl.
"'Then leave the country
." Well, that would save her but Doc
tor, one life is as dear to its holder as
another. If / don't kill her, shall skill
some one else
an y dear fellow, replied, in as light
a tone as could assume, these faneles
are durable. Put yourself under skilled
medical treatment. You are all to bits,
physically. Get sound in body, and
you'll get all right In your mind
:" On the contrary, ! am all to bits, as
YOU say. mentally. and my body suffers
through my mind. Medical treatment
have consulted every medical pracii-
tioner of note here in and Europe. Some
think I'm ioolng them, some look wise
and talk as you do about 'treatment.'
All have tailed. Doctors are no use IL
me-
"Then may ask you why you have
come here
9" To ask your advice as friend,' ht
answered, drawing his chair nearer TO ME
and lowering bis voice, 'to ask yol
one question AS friend aud God-iear
ing man, and to which 1 pray you 10 glv'
me plain yes or no.
"'Go on
"'Feeling as feel, shall | be justltei
before Gcd 10 taking my own life WI
II be deadly sin for me to do for mYsel
what would do to a mad dog =
81 repeat his words almost as he spok
them. l cannot give you the faintee
idea of the solemn deliberaiiou Wit
which he put this awful question. Fo
some moments | could not say word
Then / started up and told him that
would not answer him yes or nO-that
was not fair to ask me to take such
responsibility. Then he rose too, an
said that he must resolve II for himself
and saw plainly which way it woui
20. Give me till to morrow to think
out,'I said, OBTAINING him.
''To.morrow may oe too late, he n
piled. 'rhe 1T may come upon me Il
night for all know
: "Come home with me, I'm not atrait
You won't hurt me- | said.
t E" q would try very hard not to do so
but i know myself ] cannot tru
myself. Don't you trust me.
"'I will trust you; but Pll do NOR
4 You are not armed suppose p
"'No,' he replied with shudder N
now.'
I "I'll take care that you shall not b
and III carry my Derringer In my pOcke
I ] a.. fr.l tsaf
! give YOU my word I'll shoOt-and /
shoot straight | said this to salts
him, poor fellow In his weak state
could have laid him down like chill
1t did satisfy him, and we went home
gether. led him to talk Of our old 81
diering days, and gradually got him bal
TO his wound. made him describe t
>. Hrst sensations of pain in his head, al
a repeat all that his different medical a
1 yisers had said. I happened to have
% strong preparation OF hasheesh by me.
gave him dose, and whilst under its
n fuence / carefully examined his hsa
a Now the head, you must know, does u
fatten or waste away III proportion
other parts of the body. Still his b
i, become meIe skin and bone and u
ar state, perhaps, gave me an advanta
m over Others who had made the same
a animation. At last felt, or though
felt, faint twitching-a SOFT of ebnoru
"a pulsation-about two inches above I
left ear. 1t might be merely nervous, !
ia il might be caused by the ball.
ly 81 then set my mind to work, a
thought the whole case over steadl
in In the first pace was that impulse
take human life, or which my poor frlr
had spoken really uncomfortable. l
example, suppose that one day he
o. take a pistol on purpose, and 20 to u
nv Young lady's garden-would he shl
her Z To suppose that the insane mi
he never changes its purpose, or tulns tr
the fell completion of its purpose, is
Ilv saw in other words that the insane M
is stronger than the sane mind. i
,ut man with freshly broken leg we're
nv tell you he was going to run u foot-ra
1 YOU would not believe him because y
Ter common sense revolts against the idef
his running with leg disabled. Bu
eat one with his brain disabled declares
at he is going TO do something Deepen
a upon the action of his mind, conn
nd sense does not always argue so well.
ds. s'In the second place, did my poor hie
or, with his impaired means OF Judgm
VII believe that the impulse was uncontro
Vas bic Because II he did the end woul'
Ird. the same, go far as he was coneen
md He would sacrifice his own life to pro
,aW that of others, though they were II
ned actual danger.
the SIN the third place, might not
bad story of the impulse be a mere pret'
the to excuse the commission of suir
W, Now there were no forms OF mad
was more obscure In their origin, more
her cult to detect, more persistent, and
or fatal than suicidal mania; and as I
lud have been numerous cases in which
,a AZ h,,., dae roxad tharnEnlVas