Delaware Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1843-1874, 1873-04-14

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cow ha him.
The Marshall (Ky.) Times proclaims itself
an ''honest newspaper" In another paragraph
it says: "When young man processes homes
ty nowadays, keep your eye peeled for
thief"
judge at Waterloo New York, has been
swearing witnesses on Patent Office Report.
surprising 1T to be Bible. He said he noticed
that they swore powerful hard.
BApDIT, the soap.man, is constructing u
preposterous tsoap kettle, twenty-five feet
| across and some forty feet deep. II would be
| q very venturesome pot that would venture to
| call that kettle black.
Connecticut town boasts of young man
| so timid that he cannot look a needle in tho
eye. Many young ladies' are troubled with
similar fears whenever they can get any one
| else to do their sewing.
"AIike, will You come In and take drink"
] Mike looked at the man for the space OF half a
minute, and then. rolling his eyes upward,
very softly said; 81 tot it was an angel spa
| kin to me-"
| Are you the mate of the ship" asked an
emigrant of the cook, who was an Irishman.
sNo, Sir" was the reply, 81 am the man who
| cooks the mate"
| Women are like horses, the gayer the har-
ness they have on, the better they feel. We
| got this from an old bachelor who was early
/ crossed in love.
| Anerchange wanting to compliment "Live
Stock Journal, ''says 1t is edited by man whose
head is chuck full of live stock.
The gentleman so often spoken of in novels,
who riyeted people with his gaze, has obtained
| employment In a boiler manuiactoiy, with extra
pay, on account of his peculiar faculty.
Why is a candle-maker she worst and most
hopeless of men? Because all his wicked works
are brought to light.
country paper remarks that Ann Dante,
the composer of so many popular but rather
solemn pieces of music, is not adescandent the
poet bearing the same surname.
A Western paper says, "You might as well
attempt to shampoo an elephant with a thin
bleful of soap, as TO attempt to do business and
ignore advertising.
SHALL have your hand?" said an exqui-
site to a belle, as the dance was about to COM
mence. "With all my heart" was the re-
| sponse.
| THE difference between sealing wax tnd
| weman, says Reuben, is that one burns To
keep secret and the other TO tell it, Slsn-
der.
ONE style of bonnet is called the "Mansard,'
because 1t takes great deal OF "man's 'shard'
earnings to pay for one ofem.
Women are like hoises-tbe gayer the har-
ness they have GU, the better they fell. We got
this from an old bachelor who was early cross
ed in love.
We do not walt precepts as much as ratt N;
an example is the sottest and least invidiol
way of commanding.
lfa straw, says Dryden, can be made the
instrument oi happiness, lie Is wise man who
does not despise it.
Guard well your friendships. They ae worth
more to you than any conceivable fame.
We should judge men by their treatment of
others rather than their trestment of u.s.
The man who can be nothing but serious or
nothing but merry, is but halfa man.
South Bend girls Il e "siick to Coltax" mot
toes on their billet-doux.
Spiders always begin 10 cohbie their broken
webs in the middle.
To dream of having great number OF SER
wants is-madness
! Capt. Jacks favorite dltty-Sput me IN my
lava he'd"