The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1873-10-04

WhioA OF the reptiles ID mathemati-
clan H-The adder.
How 10 prevent bad dreams-don't
go to sleep.
To learn che value Of money-try to
borrow it.
A woHAn's love for y military officer
isgsneraliy uniform.
When does farmer work miracle
:, WhEn he turas his horse to grass.
J -Swcetening ones coffee is generally
che fret stirring event Of the day.
,23A text for bslloonists-aG thou and
do like wise."
iSg They don't let Il reign in Spain any
~ longer, when 1t prefers to Carliam. IL.
qa Taimage says thzs Jay Cscks Il one OF
s Gods picked men. Singsd, rather. be
a patent Gre escape killsd four men
in Montreal, che other day, and IL was
only experimenting thea. 10 a'
:, Why is eindsr in the eye like a
i, sshsslmastors cane l-Because it hurts
j. the pupil.
sai,so Most men kks 70 Gee themselves in
AZ priat, ladies like to see themssirss in
oo,silk and velvet.
Q ls Thsfs IL q good rsasea why q little
man should not marry bouncing widow
az He might bs called ths "Eidw's mite"
60 The "London Cosmopolitan" indulgcs
sf in the hope ofsseing Judah P. Bemja-
q Gih lord chisfjustiee of England.
'''aF "Husband, where shall I get the tick
tisg for our new feather bed ?" "Any
~ place where you can get the tick"
A full purse and brandy bottle
= rarely occupy opposite pockets in the
: same coat.
Her The maa is always most honored who
"a % most exesllent in what he undertakes.
+. IL Is better to saw wood we'll than to
l. plead law poorly.
III "A man ont West who offered bail for
isua friend WAS asked By the Judge if he
silhad m, ,ineumbrsnce on his farm.
|, n'sOh yes," ss:44 he, tiny old woman"
J" Big A convict in Maine cut his way
thr6hgh the solid masonry ofthc jail
with q piece Of hoop.skirt iron. Hoop
skirta will cut their way through every
thing. They are irresistible. |'
=, An indianapolis man writes that if
Barnum will go thither he may secure
an animal which is supposed to exempli
!, ,fy Darwin's missing lynx" It has
attacked. several citizens lately. 1
rs aaAn EIrishman seeing a ship, very
heavily laden, and searcaly above the
Hatsra sdge, exclaimed: nUpon my
seal If tha river was but ., little higher
/! q the shis would 70 the bottonr |
L, An Oneida philosopher recommends
putting asawdust in your boots to keep |
the feel dry. Many parties would doubt.
less take this advice If they could only |
iind anything else suitable to stuff shair |
heads with. IL II
The Oxford Iress says that the follow
ing epitaph viii some day adcrn tomb
stone IN Q Westehester ceuistegy: hT
sisIiere Res old thirty. five per cent, -'
20 The moro he made. the more he lent;
IliWThe raege he gel, j, the more he erayed;
The more he made, the more he shaved;
Great God! can such soul be BASedf"
An unimaginativs Englishiaan, on
, visiting The Falls 81 Niagara, was great
Ii perplexed at the astoniShmenteKprssS.
= : cd BY his companions, and on one Of
them exclaiuuatng to him, us it not q
!, mos. wonderful fslli" replied, "Won- |
! dsFiul! No. sss aethins HsndsrFGi !
i1isi Whyf 'Whats 70 hinder thAG
water frOa falling! ?" 4 =
i q 81 cay, old boy,s erisa Paul Pry to
aaexsasatoF, whoa be sspisd "a the
eoSottsm Of q yawaiug gulf 'tFhat are
lasysa ssiksiagthseg: "a bis, ,hols,' che
cid boy replied. Paul yaa not to 30
4 pat OF Ga this thsbiDp. "Whst are zen
going todo Rith she hsls l'he asked.
II. "GOiDg to eas 10 up into small holes,
the old boy, and retail them to
. farmers for gate posts, q, .,y-f ,.ua1
= TWSTsithmsA osHS saltsy night took
refuge undsp the bed eloshssA from
party Of Enssquitoss. AZ iAss, one Of
= shsas, gasping from hSat, vsatased To-
pssp beyond the buiwarkS, aud sspiad a
e. 60 ,vh;ch Nod asya rad iuko Sha ronrs, 4