St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1873-01-31

he best frontIsI'lcce All honest face
y new name for tight boots it coin
crib.
Mott" tor gr"cers Honest tea is the
best policy.
The most popular wuman'- paper A
paper of Plus.
Bill Shank> SAYS that couItship is
bliss, but matrimonl is blister.
Tunetul lyre-A music-tcacher who
does not keep his engagements.
FHpkins SAYS there are three sexes-
the male sex, the female sex. and the
insects.
When .I"nah's fellow passengers
pitched him overheard they evidently
regarded him as neither prophet nor loss.
An Illinois farmer says he can't keep
his two horses out of the neighboIs' pas
lures since he named them Woudhull"
and " C!ahin.''
1t Is five dollars fine. for Rhode Isl
and man To call another d liar without
being able To prove it, but he generally
proves it.
y neighb"r was asked, the other day,
what made her gate 50 peculiar. oh"
SAID she, - II l. Il new edition of Bun
ions Pilgrims Progress.
When IL Philadclphian gets to laugh
ing heartily, his fanily physician is
called, and he is given quinine to stop
| his shakes.
Pittsburgh has Il missing man" ex-
cltemcht. An examination of his affairs
shows that he WIS indebted to his wash
erwoman one dollar and il half. and it
is thought he has fled to Europe.
y map-pcddlrr succeeded in getting
Il lady To elope with him from Ninton,
Iowa. last week, and share his wealth.
his palace by the Lake of Como and
other Injuries So common to members
of his tribe.
England supplies her railroad patrons
with foot warmers. In thi. country pas
sengers are not only warmed through.
but thoroughly roasted.
\ Michigan man lately bad his mead
cut INTO 10y Il circular SAW as far as the
brains ought to be. AS none were found,
tine top of his skull WAS spiked Oh
again. and he Is recovering.
Josh Billings gives the following ad-
vice To Young men "DOmt he discoIIr-
aged if Yer mu>tach don't grow it
Il
duz the best nothing else duz so we'll"
\ man in Campbell. Pa. shot IL dog
hclungluG to his son. Il Youth of tender
Years. The latter lctaliated 10y burn
lng his barn down. and then went gun
ming for the old man. but couldn't lind
him.
\ newly appointed teacher in Il ward
school complained that lie couldn't find
word Ill Wehster's Unabridged Die
tionaly. "hecauSe the book ha'nt got
any index
y charitable nhahitant of St Louis
lately sent bundle containing Il wa
trltall. >u>pendcr. Il necktie and ii
>h"e->trlng to a committee for the re
lief at the suffering poor
We get an inklng of how they en-
JOY life ht the Hub. 10y this paragraph
from il Boston paper: For afternoon
and evening amllscmrmls We refer our
readers To or advertising columns"
OF the many Poles migrating to this
country. II l. remarked that very
I;u@" percentage are iourneymcn tail
OILS. This is doubtless owing to the
mutual attraction between the needle
and the Pole.
In Judge McArthur, count. i'll Wash
lIS'"l. the other day. lawyer called
'h' .ll"S" attention t" the fact that Il
certain case hId Ircru upon the docket
;,,,I,,,. ..I',I '" IT. N'n' 'no
~ N''7 ''' "''"N'"'
''Do You think | am Il fool p Il vio-
itht man asked "i the late Rev. DIR.
bethnnc. 'Rrally," replied the Dr.,
Il would not have Veutur,d thr .ss.r-
,,,,,.', ''''' "' "sh NV "Pihi"h'
d,.,, !, "''' 'i"' ii'i''''e" /"
:. 't'e''i '0ii'' man 'tiis the dlShla\ "1
- i: "''" .''in 'hel' """iu not
,...'I ,'i :. ""I 'n"' H'"i' why
80 ""t, >"Iu me- III 'aNe ni peace
"i''' H'''''' We II" VIII our nay
| lie officers at Fort kcarmcy keep Il
dark-y whose sole work is Ia break in
their new boots. He has had such a
long experience that he keeps up il con
tlnIal v"lley of Oaths. even in his sleep.
\ Vermont school Teacher iusist.d
that '.Nellov" WAS ..v;,IIer and ia. H.
gcd II pupil almost to death To convince
him of il. Sam Eyuucisc, cam
E.,st..rr ,,..,,,... ,,,,I
,xt.nd =, H., s., " ,''''' ''''''
tI,,.,,,,,, I,,,I;,,. ~. anu "o"
Int t,.,Ii t,',,I,,, ,"i i,'''l.iN 'h'' none
H., .''i,. i.''; % "I,'S ''">ci, an"
lin '''''H' - ""ii 'AceeulhSlS
Ah ONO rhees" merchant has invent
ed an electrical machine for destroying
hiPleiS III rhttNr' ana the best hotels
4 Ils.t hfI Ia l. -