, 1873-08-31
MASCULINE DISADVANTAGES.
feminine Superiority as Shown III
Frntcrnal Intclicitics.
The Hardships Men Endure in Business
and in Love.

From every part Of those United States thoro
is coming up such wailing protest against tho
lot Of women, TINT 1t is high timo somebody
should "riAe to expaln" matters In Buch way
TINT women may at last realtze their superior
advantages, mud mon bo consumed With envy.
MAscuIfHE DISADVANTAGES
beGu In babyhood. Look ut those long, flowing
drapcrios, ,-thoso tucks, nutnga, rufaings, eu,-
broidcries, and ribbons; aro not al those strictly
fominino atlornmonss2 Think, then, what a him
ranco in tho race Of lfo is to boy to spend tho
first three or four years of his earthly existence
trying to accommodate ha movements and occu-
patious to the wcnring Of potticoats, and then
hayo to give 1t nil up, aud begin life oyor aSnin
with tho assumption Of tho unnlentlonnblo In
Bgnin Of his sex. It ia no Tondor TINT mon
always look younger tlIan womou Of tho Same
ago. 1t is a!l owing to loss Of time by that frat
fa!eo starting III 1ifo. Thon come tho
1ilsEi.1Es OF poyuooD.
Docs tllo boy hopo, Bome cold wintcr-morninE,
to economlxe time by haaty toilet, and turn
himself ovor for woe bit nap aftor the rising
boil, there comes voice up tho stairway; 30
Johnnie Jol!n-tl-i-e!' with lingering poraua-
siyonoss. "Got right up. Your father says ho
wants YOU to have ali the paths shoyolod before
breakfast"
II littlo Jennio Is up aud ready for breakfast,
TINT is all that is expected. She has nothing
moro important to do than breathing on tho
fronly panos to yet view OF Johnnie at work.
Docs tho boy got up curly to got bis sliatos
elarpouod-"D Don't make that noise iu hero!"
Does ho try on those idols of hlB heart to SOC
that every strap and buckio IL in order
"Hayont told you tineB without number not
to put on your skates in tho honae? By noxt
spring tloro wont be ras Of carpet loft" How
In Fo+% in IN Iah ynfn in
Ell & te household a es JoIsnio m si bore s
hole III t4is strap for ,,me2", john,
A. xed y0qf # s es9fs es e av IN s"d e heyrs ess
he is told to put away that top or those marbles,
asked II lie can't keep quiet ono minute, aud
advised to tako book and sit down: On the
soaccs sS p + as or 0%G s
Family ROBINSON and bocomos obliyious for o
time Of hia unhappy lot, he is reused auow to it
by the paternal voico, Come, johnnie, put up
a snt 90 na a '1 Is DSsS she n
her refractory doll to bed, wonders how Johnnie
knows which way tu turn to look for the missing
animal. Perhaps he catches q granddaddy-
Nssa 0mau nn r'91s S ta Ia don oar OUT fhyme ys
road johnnie must take Johnnie boing
interrogatcd as to TINT subject on his return,
Blings Ills cap dcfiantly into the corner, in tho
groandswell of Lis discomfort, snatches up
under his breath about girlB land gceHo,"
and is again absorbed in LIS book. :" Come now,
Johnnie," says tho mother, " don't 60 to roading
johnns did you se'f honr G ms % 5ennies soas p
atairs." Five minutes more on the desort islo
and childish voice is heard at The stairs land
ing Ma, can't Johnnie come to bed I'm
afraid" "Now. Johnnie, I sl,aut speak to you
oily to flush this chapter!" " Ma Aia /" louder
don't coma Mayn't ha Come !" Enter thu
es''r"'i Ills '' nsut Haas ss"! you up te f9f
book md go. to bod! Why, pussio. why AREN'T
you ip bcdE" ~ want to kiss you Goodnight"
| pleads the sweet little fibbor. Bah! She's
a1ial Of the dark; That's the NATTER, detantly
retorss Johnnie. going up sta,ra two stepa at
time. II amt neither. Can't he stop plagueing
nlef Come, John, lot your sister alona.'
Then, again, look ut boys
| scMooI-TRouDLEs
| Can he dodge Lis calculus by complaining of
sic1-headache, aud breakfasting Oh toast and tea
IN hsd2 Gun ho slide over his untrausatcl sir-
gil by putting on a nov coat, his most bo,7itchng
! crayat, and curling his hair, and looking down
4 when the grumpy old Prof. growls ut hin,
Can fearful eyes md quivering lips aud q sob
| or two, condone in his case for g forbidden
correspondence Then look at tho, partiutisy
shown tho " sweet girl graduates" Tho re-
porters rhapAodize over their s'gracefulness, -
their "queonlincas," their '' musical voices, y
and give rcportorlal pat or two to their inaldi-
bio little platltndes; and in the next ,laya paper
figure some bou-nlots from their sparkling es-
; | says
! Nobody dllates on the "majasty," tho liking
4 lincss," tho "lpollo-like charms" Of tue young
i gentlemen graduates. They stald up there, und
Iravey address the audience, conscious all tho
tino, to tho very contro OF their beings, TINT
| their hands arc big md rcd. TINT there il ono
lock Of lair that will stick straisht up, mud that
those blasted coat-sleoyos will pull up. There's
heroiBm for you And oil their reward is, that
| the reporters say, t'Ihe speech showed thought
and study" I should think it might!
Then consider what tmon have become hardened
| What women would over consent to be atraot-
car-conductor, md stop her car ct tho Mplitted
parasol Of every stuck-up piece that clloso to
ride2 Or how could she. as conductor on a rail-
! way, steel herself against her bottor self, and
| put of tue train some impecuuious Adonis7 2 A
| woman can take week to decide whether she
I or peacock-blue." A man hns till o'clock to-
| day to make up his miud whether he will buy
/ that piece Of property or not.
But 1t 10 in the romance OF life that masculine
disadvantages arc nloBt plainly marked. Where
!! does tho man worth taking ever find courage to
ask to DO took? What inspiration shall enable
him to put in persuasive phrase that sublinloly-
ego!iAtical question: stddanl-ahem-,n1n NOT
| for husbnud2" Then, who pities him it the
1 lady changes her mind the day before the wol-
diug? Ii thers any balm III Gileal for q Tilted
lover?
| 1t is popular delusion that men never envy
| women. OF course they do. bu' they arc too
wise to confoBs it. Doubtless IL woultl bo better
noyor to be born Mt all but If that misfortune
| does occur to Que, 1t is somo atleyiation to be
| born q wonan,-to ba accounted iii angel here,
aud preaostjned to be IN angel hereafter.
/ WITCH HAZEL.
Henry y. FOOso's DMels.
Ex-senator Foote'S ienfHiscencss The Raahinqton
| Chronicle.
| AZ to my own pers0nal exnnlple IL the matter