The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1873-07-01
anustu,nts 6G
NUMBER le
Sense and Aoqss,,ss.

ISos(0S "tt 0Sus(ASte@S+
Stingy creatures-bees.
Natural slippers -Eels.
Hush.money-N sywages.
A maiden speech Ask papa"
A table of interest-The dinner table.
A plain loaf-A, visit to the prairies.
The true mission of woman-Sub.
mission.
The Danbury man is booked for q
book.
A new version of an old verse
Loathe the poor Indian.
To boil a tongue-Drink scalding
coffee.
OF an auction sale Of Menagerie, it
has been facetiously written: aTbe lion
of the SALE. if the bull may, be pardoned,
was the elephant"
Miss Anthony is willing, not to say
anxious, to prove her fearlessness by
standing "face to face with Satan
How about SatanG FsI Z
"What was the result of the trial of
that horse -stealer ?" asked Missourian
of his neighbor "Oil, he was left ham
giug in SUSPENSE" was the reply.
Fast young men. declare that the
great beauty of an ocean voyage is
"that you can get as tight.as you please,
and people think you're only sea.sick."
The fellow who called tight boots
Icomfortable, defended his position by
saying they made man forget all bis
other nniseries. g 1E,s
An amateur editor in Indiahapolis has
made a fortune by his ,pen. His father
died of grief after reading one of his
editorials. and left him S130.00o.
Tim Jackson, aleading ahanker" of
Fort Scott, Kansas, has disbursed S2,-
600 to build new church. His bank
is named after one of the old Egyptian
kings. Z 80 rsg.rss
Jones asks: eff small girls are waits,
are large ones walters f''ssss sss,s
Certainly" says sweet sixteen, ssAt
least the boys have habit Of applying
them to their lips in sealing their vows"
The Louisville Courier journal thinks
the sight of four able-minded men play
ling crequetsis the subIimest spectacle
that an impoverished country ever be-
held. ..
/ Some one ought to have been at hand
Ito say ..Don't swear to the Alabama
burglars who worked three days st q
safe and found only twenty nine cents
!
a San Francisco widow keeps the
takliil OF her deceased husband in riaas
lease she once remarked TO Trfunu
who was viewing the remains ssAlasl
how often have / banged those bones
With broomstick. | am sorry for it
now"
An Irish lass wrote to her lover heq2
Eging him to send her some money She
added, by way of postscript: :" am so
ashamed Of the request l made in this
iletter that sent after the postman to
get it hack, but the servant could not
oyertake him"
"Who was the meekest man, my SON
|eaid the superintendent of boys Bible
class in Greeppoint church sMoses,
Isir." "very well, my boy; and who
was the meekest woman ?'' @Please,
sir, there never was no meekest vo-
man." 2 1 1fss M
4 Alexander Dumas, pere. was one day
asked by. a friend to contribute ten
francs for the funeral of a bailiff who
had died in destitute circumstances
I"Whatm exclaimed the great novelist;
E..ten francs for buryitg bailiff? Here
Iafcsa hundred franes-burv TEMP 49,
eWhat's that picture on e. said q
countryman the other day in = print
store, to the proprietor, who was turn
ling over some engfavings. THAT air."
said the dealer, sis Joshua command
ling the sun to stand STILL" s.Dn tell
We'll, which is Josh and which is the
tson ?'' s7 issf
/ A eoekney conducted two ladies 10 m
observatory to see an eclipse OF the
moon. They were too late, the eclipse
was over, and the ladies, we're disap.
|pointed. 'ssOhr' exclaimed our hero,
fsdon't fret I'know the astronomer
|well. He is very polite man, and Tn
sure will begin again"
A bald. headed friend, Of ashoavy,
Iphlegmatic. temperament, was acccsted
on the street by waggish acquaintance
with the inquiry:
tom, why is your head like Alas
Ika ?"
sToo much for me, zick; / give Il
up." t.s
because 1t is sehite bear place"
"A lazy dyspeptic was bewailing his
own misfortunes, and speaking with an
intimate friend on the latter's hearty ap.
pearance.
/ "What do you do to make yourself
SO strong and heslthy?' inquired the
ldyspeptic.
Live on fruit alone," answered the
friend.
/ "Wbat kind of fruit7"
p"The fruit of industry; and I am
never troubled with Indigestion
If there is anything especially lovely
In man, it is that quiet, selfpossesAed
manner which shows person to fully
understand himself, his surroundings,
and to be equal to the emergency, as
was the. following described person:
.la'rhat was conscientious man, whose
s9hst blew off the other day in Central
Park. and rolled across the lawn. In
tstead Of chasing it down with selocu-
Itionary effects be went hareheaded to
| the park commissioners, and asked for
written permission to walk on the grass
Iif,absolnteiy necessary.n Ess
+ WHERE He Cor HER.-A correspon.
ldent lately wrote to the San Fraucisco
lGhronicle to know where Cain obtained
| his wife, and is thus severely but prop
! erlv reprovcd: "upon any subject Of 4
lpubGc nature we never refuse to throw
| the desired light. But this is altogether
q