The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1873-01-10
EAMILYINTERCOU ~.

FAMIL Y INTERCO URSE.
This is a sore subject to touch. One
feels like treading on a hundred cOrns
all at once. Nearly every family has its
sore spots-its dark corner-its private
closet, carefully locked up and the In
terror hidden from the light of day. 1t
seems strange to say that most family
difficulties arise from the ignorance of
the different members of each other,
and yet it is sadly true. Many families
live together for years, and separate,
knowing less of each others secret feel
ings, motives. and the springs which
guide action, than of others who have
lived together outside the family circle.
Small iealousies, petty selihness creep
in and produce estrangement, which fire.
quently mars the happiness of life
time.
There is little appreciation of the di-
vine beauty and loving graceful Possi-
bilities of the family relation 1t is so
common fact that we lose sight of its
wisdom, just as we forget to be thank
fuI that the sun shines, or that the dew
and rain fall. The sweet name of moth
er, brother, sister, falls upon the ear
without meaning, while we are constant
Iy associated with them, and in the hab-
ituaI enjoyment of their kind offices; it
is only long after, when, perhaps, some
bright eyes have become dimmed, and
the merry laugh of others hushed, and
the weary, tired heart seeks its rest
among strangers, that the magic of
household names, and the deep, tender
meaning of the household relationship
is really felt.
Of course, the fault of this lies with
the parents. Precept is of little use
without example. Some parents think
it beneath their dignity to prefix a re-
quest with " If you please" or Have
the Kindness and then wonder why
their children cannot be mannerly
like other people. We have known the
sons of a poor widow, who on no ac-
count would have permitted themselves
to sit down to the table with their moth
er, without first arranging their toilet in
the best manner their circumstances
would permit, never suffered her, no
matter what the temptation, to attend
church or her weekly prayer meeting
alone. This consideration extended to
their minuest acts of their daily life,
and was most charming to see. The
mother, it is hardly necessary to say,
was lady by birth and education, and
had carefully practised toward hSr chill
dren that respect for their feelings, and
thoughtfulness for their comfort, which
she afterward received from them.
The great want In families is justice
and reciprocity and that forbearance
which it is necessary for mortals always
to exercise towards each other We
willingly accept it from others, but we
are not willing to give it in return. We
establish a claim on some incidental cir
cumstances, or the bare fact of relation
ship, and impose burthens and accept
kindness without a thought of obliga-
ton Oh our own part. Children make
the life of their parents. one of never
ending toll and anxiety, and often re-
fuse even the poor reward of their love
and confidence. Sisters demand aid,
protection and favors of all sorts from
their brothers, and if asked to make
their shirts, and mend their shoe, or
even hem their handkerchief in return,
would have a thousand excuses, or, per-
haps, fatty refuse the needed service.
Habitual politeness is n valuable ele-
ment of family intercourse. A course,
rude. speech is less excusable, address,
ed to a father, mother, brother or sister,
than if used to a stranger or a simple
acquaintance, and yet how common 1t is.