Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1873-03-15
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AFUNNY ELOPENIENT.
HOW IT WAS PLANNED AND EXECUTE

HOW IT WAS PLANNED AND EXECUTED.
"I'll tell you what it is, WIFE," said Peter
Smith, and he emphasized the remark by n
wise shake of the forefnger, "things have
got into n very bad way. The farm is
mortgagcd TO the last cent it is worth, and
owe heap of money heside-more by II
long shot than know how to pay. What
is to lie done?"
Il am sure / don't know, Peter" re-
piled the bothered wife, "but it seems too
awful bad to be turned out of house and
home at our time of life. Now if our son
John would only marry Jonas Browns
daughter Sally, it would help us out amaz-
ingly. The Browns, you see, are well oil,
and the connection would be n perfect gold
mine to us. OF course they'd give Sally
the hundred acres of land and things that
they've always said they would"
That's a good idea, wife, and Peter
frightened up amazingly. You always
were cute woman, and the notion does
you credit. But do you think the young
folks would take to it?"
II don't know, out it seems to me that
they've always taken great notion to each
other ever since they were children-been
more like brother and sister than anything
e!sc.n
'But suppose the Browns would object,
as most likely they would2 You know we
amt on good terms-thick as the young
folks have been"
"I'n tell you what, Peter. is just the
thing for us to do-put up John TO elope
with Sally"
Agreed. III leave it all to you to man
age"
Thus the matter was settled, and the
scheming couple went to bed to dream of Il
speedy release from their financial embar-
rassments.
! Condolences are sometimes of the most
curious character-al almost surprising be-
! lief in some instances.
About the time of the above conversation
| between Mr.. aud Mrs. Smith, their neigh
/ b)rs, Jonas Brown and wife, held an i'm
! portant con 'erence.
ado you remember that note for six hun
drcd dollars | gave for stock last spring?''
asked Jonas.
YES" replied his wife.
swell, it's coming due in about month,
and how under the sun we're going to pay
/ for it don't know.n
Mortgage the farm"
! We've done that till it can't be mort
gagged another cent. Pm clean discour-
aged, and there is Sally wanting piano.
! Where the money is to come from is mys-
I terry to me, We're on the verge Of bank
ruptcy."
Il wish Sally would marry John Smith
gracious knows they're together enough
to take notion that way"
"Yes, but | don't see how that would
help us any,"
| You don't, ELI? Well, l do. Amt
his folks rich? and wouldn't they set him
up handsomely Then we could stand
some chance of getting help through Sally
That's n good plan, )" was Jonas con-
clusiol, after profound medtation; "but
the difficulty is, that the Smiths are not on
god terms with US, and would be likely to
oppose the match.n
Then the best plan is to set the young
| folks up to an elopement."
So it CHANGED that the Browns and the
! Smiths planned TO dispose of their children
to their own pecuniary advantage. The
next step in each case was to mould the
young ones to the proper shape.
John Smith was a handsome, brawny
country fellow, with plenty of good sense,
and an ocean of love for Sally Brown.
/ When his parents proposed his marrying
/ her, he informed them that he would gladly
do so, but he feared her parents would OBJ
ject. Then his father siyly suggested an
elopement, and offered to aid in carrying
out such an exploit. John said he would
/ think about it.
/ Sally was rustic maiden with much
redness Of checks, and rejoicing in the pos
session of the lasting comeliness which is
derived from bright smile, sweet tenn
per, a pair of clear earnest eyes, made none
the less expressive by the near neighbor-
hood of a saucy little retrousse nose. Her
wavy brown hair had not ripple out OF
place, and her plump little figure was en-
cased in a well fitting dress, which was
neatness ITSELF When her parents spoke
to her about John, she blushed becomingly,
and, after close questioning, admitted that
she would be "tickled to death" to marry
him. She further stated that they were
running over with love for each other;
that they had long ago settled the question
of ultimate union, but that they feared pa
rental objection.
"Now, III tell you what, Sally" said
! Mrs. Brown, ''you know pa and | dote on
you, and would do anything to make you
haggBgy." gggys, We wou,S do ANYTHING to make
you happy" echoed the old man.
Sand il you were 10 hint to John the
| idea of an elopement, we wouldn't lift our
fingers to prevent it,"
"No," repeated the old man. 1--WE would
not lift our fingers 10 prevent it,"
/ In thus instructing their children, the
Smiths ana Browns displayed very little
knowledge Of human nature. They should
have known that John and Sally would,
IL, -.