St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1873-06-06
Humorous.

Humorous.
VERY CERTAIN. The >urc~t way to
loose N"ur health i t" keep drinking
other peoples.
joe. I've It great mind I" blow my
brains uiil. ''Nhl don't you ," said
Joe. ''n"h"'Iy would ever know it
- .'C"~t iron inks :" l. the legend
"u the >igu of u Hartford plumber.
''WrII. VIII" llicl said it didn't ," was
the mpIir' of .In inchIi.tGrd man of sin.
who read il over tlncc or -four times
and rhurklcd when he thought he saw
the point.
In. RcId. the celebrated medical
writer. was requested hy il lady of liter
arl "murucc to call at her house. BE
,,uir y"u rrcoIlcct tn" address. said
Ill, - She quilted the room. No. |.
Chesterfield street. "Madamc. said
the doctnr. Il am to" great au admirer
of polIttmcs- not To remember Chester
field. and. fear too selfish ever Ia for
gct number one.
\ Dutchman getting excited over All
account "f am "l"rcmrnt of q married
woman. gay" his opinion thus: "lf my
wife runs away init ;lnodcr mans wife.
| shake him out of his prrcche>. if she
hc IA, tad,irI. mine Got.
\ bright little boy. hearing his IA
then SAY that man ought to stick To-
his business. cmptird IL bottle ot mu
rilagr in that old gentlcman's office
chair. The old man SAYS he has not
been stuck 81 badly since l~J1. and re-
wardcd his offspring hy taking him on
u whaling "trip t" the back cellar.
>"thrrI'> latest Joke WAS presenting
81 nearly tull-gr"wn bear to Miss Neil
>uii. the English actress. He wrote her
he had Il charming little pet for her,
and she WAS dclightcd but. when she
lrhrld the promotions of the ferOcinus
monster. her delight changed To dlsInay.
After hcr friends had all taken a look at
the animal. She gave him To the Zoo
logical gardens.
\ Yankee iii Paris. who was lis
trmin" To The boasts of lot of English
and Frrnrh artists about the wonderful
Genius "f their respective countrymen.
1T last "hokc ON and said. ''Oh.
p-haW lrou git r"Ht, Why. there's
Bll Divine. of uur village. who kin
paint II piece "f cork 81 H,ckly like
marble that the minute You throw it
into the AatrI ii will sink to the bot
tom. knIr chug. ir>' like II stone
: gentleman from Bo>ton visiting
London ua~ recently asked his Iesi-
drucr hy an accomplished Lnglishman.
and oE replying WAS answered 'Ah.
th, Quaker city. ''bh. no. said the
American '''iIadcIrhia j. the Qua
ken city. YES. know. replied the
EuglishnrHu "hut Boston is in Phila
dclphia. isn't il -
rhrr, is now lying in the story com
~ ihi. lryI. Il mar Nnu Wa> unable
T." tlud Il woman for himself hut was
obliged T." steal another mans wife.
Aitri Ia, was disco, cred and locked up.
the wumau " iot, to him the following
lrttci. April 10. i~73. iIrw. want
to know whether Nnu can give me up
ur not / feel H. though | can give
You mp and ga home if yen can give
me Hp don't no hut it would he Il
gradcc hrtrc! t"r both of m> t" give
each other MP. 80 "IIrW" gave her
up.
CnrII,\'r Tnu> IIlN>Ei.r. The
Stri~S Times reports that u native al Fri
brI!lm plr~cuird himself a few days
tgn 1T il, window Of She Post Office at
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I'm VIII, c3u.I Won fake !, >u,r.,.lf -
.\h ti,rrr il is" answered tI,,. sim
ulc frlInw. You -cc know myself,
and if; were to tuk, th, none, with
u,,. t,,,. probability is that il vouId
nc>,.r reach E,trryn,cr. while hy send
in., il through th, Past Ollie. Shall b,.
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Shah need it,"
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