The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1873-12-06
Che 4e'e Aorth'Afest.
Saturday, December 4, 1873.
oOsERvAIIo rs.
Nv MAX ADEiER.

FROM Tue SitnTNns Evening GosI.
Our ncighbor Chubb has not much Of an
ear for music, but I've has spent considera-
bic sum In having his daughter Taught how
to hammer piano, and he Is proud of her
accomplishments. lie was talking with us
over the fence the other day when series
Of dreadful sounds came from his piano
through the open parlor window. "Dyou
hear that. Adcler? Just listen to that, will
you? That's what call music Then
there were few additional bangs On the
c"nlant humping.
..Splcndid. isn't it ." said Chubb, ''Mary
James Dustin the music right out of that
machine, you, observe. Them the Strauss
waitzes. believe, she's ra,tlin' with now.
Just li.tcn.'
We remarked that from the energy dis
played. Mary Jane at least seemed to he
really in earnest. BIT whether she was
treating Mr.. Strauss exactly right was an
open question.
~ don't know nothin about music.
Adeler. said Chubh, .'but kin tell the real
thing when hear it. and ! kin sit and hear
Mary Jane play them waltzcs and the
Maiden's Prayer until 1t makes me cry like
4 child
We asserted that if she pIa .cd those com
positions as she was doing now, il would
make anylNly cry. 4 deaf mute would
shed tears.
"Listcn 10 thar now. will you?' ex-
claimed Chnbb rs wild tumult of sound
came from the parlHr. "lsn't that splei,-
did: II didn't know it was Mary Jane
a-tcarin' around among them waltzes Id
think IL was one Of them Ccllcrs who play
~ the concerts. Let's go over and hear
her
We entered the house and sought the
parlor Mary Jane was nowhere to le seen,
hut 10 the infinite disgust Of Chubb there
was q Ird-l,aired man with fist rs big as
loaf Of bread, tuning the piano. Cl,ubb
asked us not I" tell anybsly. and we won't.
II Is related here in confidence and II must
70 n" farther.
Lumley lIas an entirely bald head and
ii is related Of him. (tl,c story Is not ours).
that once when he was ut the Geological
Garden, in Paris, the day was warm, and
he lay down upon one Of the benches and
went to sleep. After awhile he was awak-
cnctl by sense Of suil1cation. and when
he opened his eyes h. found that something
covered his face. lie began to struggle to
release himself, and the next moment q gi-
gantic ostrich leaed up and began to
prance down the path. The ostrich had
observed the top If Lumley's bald head,
aud, Mistaking II for one Of its eggs, had
begun 10 set upon it for the purpose Of
Matching 1t. LumLy has since worn wig;
and when lic g'@s among o,tricl,cs he keeps
his hat on.
4 recent volume II lse,ns published in
this city contains some verses entitled :" BY
the Sea- in which the poet says:
"Dn the foaming white Of the misty rlf
NY lover seems to ride:
And think how lone I. IT. billowy h"m
Upon the slvcry tide
There can be no doubt that a man would
m lonely riding out on the fo,ming white
of the silver tide, and under the civc,im.
stances It would seem IN if the poet would
have lecn in the line Of duty to have pad
died out to that lonely lover in skin in
stead Of sitting Oh the shore and being bit
ten by the grccn-hcaded flies. but the
thought Of his loneliness would not have
occurred 10 nv before anything else. Our
first thought would have been that unless
that idiot out there on the foamimg white,
lad On India rubber Ovcralls he would liz
positively certain to get his pants wet and
to suffer ultimately from rheumatism in his
legs. And then We should have borrowed
boat and dragged him ashore by his hair
II lIe had any. Perhaps this is not poet
zeal view, but lover with widowed
brecclIcs and cramp in his shins il not no
ctical either.
We take two health journals, and they
worry us nearly tn death. The Sanit,riuD.
will come on Monday with an article show
ing that nearly all cases Of consumption are
attributable tO the practice Of keeping the
!ksi-rnm windows open at night. On
Wednesday will come the Family INysiciam
with an editorial demonstrating that bill
Iiohs fever arises from keeping the windows
closed ut night. AZ W. must either close
them ar open them, it IL clear We have to
choose between the positive certainty Of
consumption or Of bilious fever. On Mon
day the Sdnihrimm shows that tobacco il
y deadly poison, and that smoker is Ger
tain to have 4 cancer In his mouth and ell
tire destruction Of his mental facilities
sooner or later. On Wednesday, when the
Efmity PAysicidD arrives. We find that q
cigar may he used with advantage when
there arc sores In the mouth, and that mod-
crate smoking braces the nerves and keeps
the mind clear. The Sanisarium insists
that suspendesx make the shoulders round,
ana consequently injuIc the chest. Two
days afterward tho EmHv Physicion de.
clares that unless clothing Is worn very
loose about the waist the health will be ru-
ined. In sucl, case It seems that there IL
nothing to he done but to 90 without trou-
sers; and II we consent to do that, some
other health journal would come out with
the statement that unless the legs are COW
cred intiammatory rheumatism II sure to
ret In. One says coffee drinking IL certain
death; the other asserts It IL the only way
to perfect health. One affirms that per-
sons should drink great deal Of water up-
On going to bed, aud none when they rise
In the morning. The other says that water
should be drunk upon rising, and not upon
retiring. One states that everybody should
take walk In the morning upon ali empty
stomach u poor sort Of thing TO parade
on, by the way), and the other declares
that thousands ruin their constitutions ey.
cry year BY doing 70. These things are
calculated to perplex man, unless hs en-.
tartains that opinion Of health journals
which we have gradually formed, which In,
that they are, generally, publications Of .
particularly asininc nature.
owl Russell"
FINN ti~ 1>xi nuSou lua.l,ss,o.r~.