The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1873-02-01


Credit Mobilier securities on . large scale.
Hence these terrible conflicts for the Senate,
requiring in Louisiana the United States
troops to be on guard, and in Alabama the
mediation of the Attorney General of the
United States as peacemaker
How to Blot Out Unpleasant Mcn-O-
A man in Elmira. N. Y, about three years
ago, as recounted elsewhere, struck his head
against beam and was rendered insensible
He recovered, prospered in business and until
few days ago enjoyed perfect health. He
then was taken with acute pains in the head,
accompanied by violent spasms Ho was
attended by the doctors and again recovered
perfect bodily health; but his memory, so far
as concerned all events which had taken place
since the date of his accident, thrce years be-
fore, was q blank. His partner in business he
greeted as the schoolmaster he had known him
to be before the beam and his own head came
into contact. He was puzzled to account for
his two children born in the three years
interval. 1t embarrassed his wife, embarrassed
himself and attracted the attention of all the
scientists and gossips of Elmira. II is GER
tainly curious, and deserves much wider
notice than merely local fame would give it.
In view Of the deep suggestiveness of the
accident and its results we would submit
that the medical faculty of the whole country
should select from their best men committee
of experts to carefully examine the Uranium
of the man of Elmira The first thing for
them to settle would be the exact point on the
skull where it struck the beam. The direction
and exact force of the blow should next be
ascertained, and, if possible, the exact thick
ness of the bone at the point of contact.
Their next inquiry should be what exciting
causes preceded the late attack. Should they
succeed in gaining all these particulars
accurately the value of the secret they have
gained will be incalculable. .safo"a
Armed with their secret q man about to
commit base or unworthy action could select
a convenient beam and knock his head against
it. He would become insensible, and presently
recoysE Then he might in defiance of
remorse or self-contempt to come, Of the
fnser-pointing scorn of Others of public
humiliation, 60 about his black business,
whatever it might be--Credit Mobilier, Sena-
torial bribery, municipal frauds, forgery, rob-
berry or perjury. How he could chuckle in his
heart while his sin, his crime was undis-
covered. The antidote to self-reproach
which he carried in his sconce would be
to him q perpetual dark lantern of knavish
delight. When the moment of discovery
came; when his guilt was made visible of all
men; when from being the spoiled pet of the
people he was being coldly consigned to the
noisome grave of universal obloquy, he could
still laugh in the teeth of misfortune. A
single application of the friendly beam once
more, draught Of some strong liquor, or
whatever the experts would decide to be the
cause of the second attack to the Elmira man,
would be applied by the criminal to himself,
and 10! after o few spasms he would arise
and go forth with his il-gotten gains in his
pocket innocent as the babe unborn how
they came there. He would have
his indignation reused when the press
assailed him he would not recognize the |
felonious offspring of his sinful, hypocritical |
days; he would not speak to his partners in
crime /; would be, in fine, a rosy-souled indi- |
vdual, unconscious of ever having done |
wrong. Just picture what Schuyler Colfax |
would give if he had five years ago knocked |
his head against beam near the Speakers |
chair If tomorrow he could apply the anti
dote how glad he would be to waken up the
day after without having to simulate inno-
be able in his heart to wonder how
that twelve hundred dollars got into his bank
account, and how he became Vice President
How Brooks would have beaten his skull
against his son-in-law's how Patterson
would have knocked his head against
the granite hills of his native State
how Kelley would have butted his
against a bar of pig-iron how Dawes
would have knocked his against Plymouth
Rock five years ago! How Harlan, Pomeroy
or Caldwell would have run against the pill
lars of the Capitol How glad all the Credit
Congressman would have been had
Hoax Ames knocked his against the barney
stone when he kissed it SO many years ago
Why, when the exposure was threatened, they
would simply have taken him into lonely
place and administered the antidote. Then
might they have snapped their fingers at his
efforts to ''refresh his memory" How Tweed
would like to have dropped his head against
a corner of the new Court House! How he
must wish Andy Garvey had!
1t is wonderfully suggestive, this head and
beam business, and, in the interest Of suffer-
ing sinners, we would impress upon our
medical authorities the ACCESSIBILITY of sending
The experts to Elmira without delay.