The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1873-04-04
BALMY BoREAs.

Remarks on the Subject of Spring
The following first-rate comment
on "the subject of spring." as that
article is now being enjoyed in Kan.
sas, We clip from the Topeka Com.
monwealth Oft late date. 1t is sur.
prising to us how sensible men can
willingly consent to live in such q
country when they are within two
days travel ofthis sunny land where
spring, without any such drawbacks
rs prevail in Kansas, is almost per.
onnial.
We have so far refrained from saw NC
anything on this important subject, from
the fact that up to the present time it
would have been unreasonable. But now
spring has come; ii commences this morn
lug at o'clock and 40 minutes, and lasts
ninety-two days, twenty hours and twenty
three minutes, as we discover by referring
to the beautiful calendar prin ted in red
aud black ink, and presented to us on the
frs! Of January By the "Kilem Life In
surance Company The Kilems at the
end OF said calendar very judiciously ad.
yised us to get our precious life insured in
their Office, SO that we might recover, in
case we got killed on our summer trip to
the watering places, or our proposed jour-
nCy to Leaycnworth to write an introduc-
ton to Hugh Burke's daughters of the
Boudoir,' and other poems. But as we
never knew dead man to recover, We
didn't get insured. Well, to repeat our
selves, (as great minds always do), spring
is here; spring is humbug; o fzzle in
fact it is not what it is cracked up to be.
lthas acquired great newspaper reputa-
ton which it is entirely unable to sustain
1t is the most disagreeable of all the sea
SONG. The poet Longfelloow, shortfellw, or
some other fellow, has said;
"She is variable as the shade
by the dimcity gas light made"
She is windy as ward politician, and
sChrceChes sharply about our auricular or
gans, ascending u SILVER through our Hercu-
lean frames. Especially is this the case
in March, when she marches proudly into
existence, bowling like ranting actor in
high tragedy parts at low theatre. In
April she Is somewhat more placid and in
May is as lazy as the president of the To-
pcka loaler's league.
The styles all change in spring, and
young ladies stand on the street crossings
and keep others waiting while they talk
about the fashions and ask how each
others false teeth fit. Young men stand
on the corners and beat time on dry
goods box with the front door brass key of
the stores they sweep out. Ministers al
ways expect good trade when spring
commences and the marriage season
opens Croquet breaks out in spring, in
mild form however Spring hats this
year has no spring in them, and
spring chickens sp ring clear off the table
when you go to dissect them. Spsipg
cloihes-pins are worn this year by police
judges while trying cases Of vagran-
cy Spring robins are now in fashion
hen-roost robbins we mean. Spring fe-
yer has alsoput in appearance, but is not
much sought after. There Are frequent
inquiries. already for spring whcat-in a
liquid form, to wash down the dust. Spring
cucumbers have not commenced coming in
yet, and arrangements have been made to
lynch the first man that brings any.
Painters are now busy at their spring
work, including, of course, young ladies'
with beautiful compilations. We refrain
from any further remarks on spring, from
the fact that there is snow storm COM
ing up.