The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1873-02-15
A Many-TitleA DON Quixotc Declares
War ON Fish.

Many-Titled Don Quixotc Declares
War ON Fish.
There are two extraordinary potentates in
the United States, and they have become in
volved in o terrible quarrel. The first is Don
Jose Ferrer de Couto, Knight of the Order of
Santiago, Commander of the Royal American
Order of Isabel Ia Cat6lica, Knight of the
Order of Charles ILL.,, Honorary Member of
the Mexican Geographical and Statistical
Society, Fellow of the Commission of the
History of Spanish Infantry, of the Royal
Academy of Archaeology Of Madrid and High
Cockalorum of Spanish chivalry generally.
The second is Mr.. Fish.
The first is Quixote of the quill of
sombreroed magnifcence, who Aourishes in
this city; the second is only our Secretary of
State. The hidalgo has the advantage over
the American in length of name, and he has
declared war upon him because of something.
He wrote letter to Mr.. Fish, which we
published at the time, and which explained
all about it. Some paper in Washington
has had the temerity to present itself to
the mind of the Spaniard as the hand organ
on which Mr. Fish gets off his scales. This
was the first objectionable offence rendered to
the Spaniard. This being 80, it is easy to
grasp what followed The paper began to play
what sounded to Spanish ears like the music of
Cuba Gbre. The Cuban cause was making
gigantic Roadway it said, and the passive
policy no longer holds good AS if taran-
tula had bitten him behind the ear fury
seized the son Of Spain. Slapped he then the
hilt of his Office ruler, buckled on his devils
satchel, dabbed on his war paint with his gum
brush, sharpened the point of his longest
quill and declared that mortal wrong had
been done to Don Jose Ferrer de Couto
knight of the Order of Santiago, Commander
of the Royal American Order CT Isabel la
Cat6lica, Knight of the Order of Charles
I'LL, Honorary Member of the Mexican
Geographical and Statistical Society, Fellow
of the Commission of the History of Spanish
Infantry, of the Royal Academy of Archeol-
ogy of Madrid and High Cockalorum Of Span
ish chivalry generally. So much insulted dig
nifty it would be almost otherwise impossible
to get together in one suit of clothes. The
cup Of his anger was not yet full for he had
taken note that the offending newspaper hopes,
in the name of Mr. Fish, for a favorable reply
to his communication to our Minister at Ma
drid, under date of Goth October last.
"Cdramba!' yells the Spaniard. think
you that q respectable government would re-
ceive such note, or would fail to boot the
bearer of such missive SO that he would
gyrate through the air in parabolic curves
from one end of the Strada del Popolo to the
other2" If MI. Fish has not enjoined our
Minister to deliver the note, he had
better hesitate before doing SO. Amadeus
has resigned his precious crown; Zorrilla is
taking a plunge into privacy; the Carlists
are carrying the flag Of retrogression, with
fire and sword, and whipping other Spaniards
out of their zapatos; CASTELAR, and his
republicans ore for the present in power,
but anything or nothing may turn up.
Our Minister would be placed in very
delicate position, as in all hidalgodom there
might not be an individual, Spanish or
Italian, to whom he could address himself as
the government. Then, again, there might
be half dozen faction leaders, to which Of
whom the Minister would be in doubt to apply
for his problematicaI kicking. There is q
contingency which the irate Spaniard should
not overlook. The Spaniards are fond
of titles as babies of rattles, and
if they searched from San Sebastiano
to Cadiz and from Finisterre to Barcelona
where could they find one to equal Don Jose
Ferrer de Couto, Knight of the Order of San
tiago, Commander of the Royal American
Order of Isabel Ia Catolica, Knight of the
Order of Charles I'LL, Honorary Member
of the Mexican Geographical and Statistical
tory of Spanish Infantry, of the Royal Acade-
my of Archaeology of Madrid and High Cock
alorum of Spanish chivalry generally? Where,
indeedP This contingency looks to the possi-
bility of Don Jose, &C., being called upon to
be the government of Spain. His letter shows
how he can with his present limited opportuni-
ties exterminate rebels-on paper-and we
can imagine if only he were the government,
the gusto with which he would shoe himself
as formidably as the Cid and practise kicking
in competition with Spanish mule, so as TO
prepare for the visit of our Minister. Then,
indeed, would it be the duty OF MIR. Fish to
send an iron suit of clothes, inexpressibles
particularly, along with his instructions. But
Il has not come to this yet. 1t is, therefore,
poss;ble that the High Cockalorum of Spanish
chivalry generally may imagine the Knight of
the Order Of Santiago to be deeply injured, the
r., ..5o~ ~ tho Rovo1 Amorican Ordar IF
Isabel Ia Cat6lica to be outraged, the Knight
of the Order of Charles Ill to be insulted, the
Honorary Member of the Mexican Geographi-
cal and Statistical Society TO be blackballed,
the Fellow of the Commission of the History
Of Spanish Infantry to be drummed out
Ill. AaoI Of