, 1873-01-26

cation the official examiner thought it could nos
be granted, because OF similar dovice in " Don
Quixote," where 6ancho Panza trying to sleep
in tho hay~loft, w2s Kept awake BY the braying
Of lis donkey below. His wnkefulnees gavo
Sancho time to reflect, that, when riding tie
donkey, the animal always switched his tail
when he hrayel- Descending hastily from tic
aay-loft, the squire tod block to the donkeya;
tai to prevent him from braying. Bat as this
device originated with Spaniard, and had never
been repeated II this country, tho Office decided
to grant the patent. Our readers will. thore-
1oro, remember that they cannot tie Z cows tail
70 prevent y. IT'S switching without payment Of
Another gentleman applied for q patent for
heating canals by steam, SO that boating could
go on IN winter as well as in summer, The Office
decided that this invention WIS worthy Of pro-
lection, and gave him his patent
Another applied for Combination Of clock
and bed, go ingeniously contTiyed thai, whom tho
clock struck, the bottom Of the bed dropped out
He claimed that this plan would probably awaken
the sleepers.
Speaking Of the combinations, he must l,sve
como from Missouri or kansaB, who asked for
patent for combination OF cannon and pillow.
For this purpose he flied three applications,
making the elongated handles Of the plow ho1-
low, 80 as to form two cannon. These were to
be kept loaded until the greTillas vera after
him tho cannon were then to be firod, tho gueE-
rillas shot down, and tho farmer to go On Lis
way rejoicing.
AND no, too must have come from tho borders
who asked for patent OF combination
Of trunk and house. Tho trunk wan
made whit 1iple sides, moving up and
down Doing duty all day in guarding
clothes, VIXEN night came on, and no cabin near,
tho triple walls elevated into one, and tho be-
nighted traveller safely housed.
Another asked for patent for tho invention
Ct the geueratione Of steam ly boaring hole in
tho ground until he reached tho waters EL:t arc
boiled BY the internal fires Of earth. He set
forth, among tho advantages Of his plan thnt
there would bo no danger Of explosions, no e1-
pense for fuel, no necessity OF engineer+au OF
which statements arc undoubtedly trne.
It must have been relative Of this last gem
tleman, and ono equally acquainted with tho
lava TINT govern the hidden heart of this planet,
who applied for patent for boring tha earth ;
for artesian wells for purposes Of irrigation.
He gravely set forth that no had made the dis
corory that quicksilver Was heavier than common
earth. He therefore proposed to start G hole,
and to empty into it little mercury. BY the
Laws Of Nature, that mercury would be- sure to
work it's way downward till it struck water, and
the water would then be sure to work it's way
upward till it struck air. L
Should it be said that such patents as this
last, as that for tie prevention of cows switci1f
ing their tails, for artificial moons, for p1owb
doing the work Of cannon ETC., must be foxes,
nc can only reply that shrewd Yankees arc moi;
wont to pay 80 even for practical Jokes, aud that
none of theao designs hare eliminated into
patents under less than that sum, and, when at-
torneys were employed, under double and qrnd-
ripple that sum.-1E- r. Hooper in Appleton's
Journal.