The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1873-08-22

lnlne composition, or at least among man,
who wear the habiliments of the softer sax
there is, and has been from time immeuo
nal, II tradition and every day experieDce
may be accepted as good authority on that
! subject, an overweening desire to assume
the ''unmentionable" prerogatives of the
| opposite sex-in other words, to ''wear the
breeches." Or to bring our meaning down
% much finer point, those strong minded
/ specimens of the genus feminine who s'rule
! the roast" and play ''cock of the walk to
/ the great discomfort of their lords and
masters(?) are, we regret to say, by nc
/ means extinct IN this our day and genera
/ Cloh. In song aid story they still hold a
! prominent ''posish, ?" and so long as those
! immortal lines from the inspired pen of a
henpecked poet which assures us that
when woman will she will, you may depend
ont,
And when she won't she won't, and that's the
end ont"
have place in the memory of prosecuted
man, so long will there be living and NOV
ing eXemplifications of the saddening truth
contained in the above elegant couplet All
this, however, may be nothing more OF less
than set up jOb' on Goods first best
gift to man." and we only make use of it
for the purpose of Introducing little Incl
dent which occurred in this ''neck of tim
ber' "a day or two ago. As rumor has it.
y
: than thousand miles from this place made
up his MIND to form one of trio of adyen-
turous spirits who contemplated a picnic
IAN, II not a Pickwickian, trip into the
country for the good of their healths and
finances, and having made up his mind he
proceeded to make up his body. for the pir-
pose of disguise, in the Sunday-go-to-meet-
ing coat of his paternal ancestor Thus
far everything was lovely and the goose
C9nffpr \ Z
ly elevated position But ere the Young
husbands bright dreams of rural felicity
had reached the eliminating point, his
wife got wind Of his movements, and lust
about the time that he and his boon com
panlons had snug ly ensConced themselves
in the vehicle which had been procured for
their conveyance to the scene of festivities
and were about to move out of town, she
''mOved on the enemy's works and a scene
which can be much better imagined than
described thereupon ensued. In the flash
language of the day, 'Eshe went for him., -
and it Is almost needless to remark that
pap's coat suffered somewhat in the con-
troversy. Shortly thereafter a young, con-
tiding, but exceedingly crestfallen husband
might have been seen vending his way
homeward with a loving spouse flankiug
Kim on all sides, as occasion required
And yet he didn't go home-'not Just yet
v.
incontinently left his better half to pursue
her weary way all alone t,y yherself-which
she. however, didn't do to any great ex-
tent either. Reaching his waiting com
rades IL few hundred bounds, more or
less, he was ere long once more safely en-
sconced in the vehicle previously referred
to, and at pell-mell gate, past the toll
gate west, the victorious trio wended their
way to the pic mic, fully five miles from the
starting point. This strategic movement,
1T is fair to presume, was not down on
the bills, so far as the party in pursuit
had been consulted in the making out Of
the programme, but with a vim and deter
mination which speaks well for her man
h0od, she bravely concluded that it would
never do to give it up so, and the result of
that conclusion was her appearance in the
very midst of the pic niCan festivities in
less than two hours after the precipitate
flight of her liege lord. Here we would
gladly drop the curtain and announce the
drama at an end, but the truth of history
demands the recording Of the fact that, at
a somewhat later hour in the evening, an
exceedingly uemOralized young man might
have been seen trudging his weary way
hOmeward, followed at the distance of a
hundred yards or 50 by the blighter of his
joys and the conSoler of his woes, who had
not only walked all the way to the picnic
grounds free gratis for nothing hut actu-
ally succeeded III perSuHding her ..worser
half that it would be the healthiest thing
he could do to exercise his muscles in like
manner on the return trip. Thus it was
that one gentleman at least failed to enioy
all the pleasures he had hoped to enioy.
and thus ii is that our Ger true tale" has
been brought to an abrupt if not happy
conclusion.