davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02
False Motions.

1t is not always those who seem most
busy that accomplish the most work.
This was illustrated the other day in Il
forcible manner.
The foreman of one Of our large news
paper offices was showing d gentleman,
who knew nothing about the printing
business, over the establishment. In
the composing room he watched with
wonder and admiration the thousands
OF little bits of metal passing with a
click, click, like the noise of a piece of
machinery, into the polished sticks
which the cOmpOsitOIS held in their
hands. The foreman asked the man
whom he considered the fastest COM
pOsitOr.
The gentleman answered: That is
easily done that tall young fellow over
there seems two set twice as much as
any one in the room. His hands go
about so fast that | can scarcely follow
his motions"
Wrong" said the foreman; your fast
est cOmpOsitOr is that quiet looking
young man by the side of the one you
have pointed out"
"He seems very slow and deliberate,n y
said the visitor: g his hands do not
move nearly so fast as those of his
neighbOr. It cannot be possible that
he sets more type"
at is true, replied the foreman. The
secret is that he picks up q type every
time he goes for it. The other man
makes what we call false motiOns;' his
hand goes twice to the case for d type,
and though he seems to be doing a good
deal of work, his stick fills slowly iu
comparison with that of his deliberate
neighbOr, who never hurries, uses just
the amount of action sufficient to ac-
COmplish his purpose, and does not set
one muscle in motion unnecessarily
Half, more than half of the energy
used in the world is expended i'll false
motions. Men dash about in IL great
hurry as if they had all the business OF
the city on their shoulders, and at the
end of the day they find they have ac,
cOmplished about one hours solid work
Keep your eye well on an object, think
little and then go for it. One shot fOl
which steady. aim is taken will ac-
cOmplish more than volley at random
Take things easily; as the song says
"It's always best to take things in quie
sort of way" The amount of strength
expended in "false motions" " would be
enough to place every one in the wOrlC
beyond the reach Of want could it bC
utilized.
Keep cool; don't fume and fret ant
bother yourself, but think how thin.
is to be done and then do it. Av0i(
"false mOtions;" let every move yOl
make mean something, and be an ad
vance forward to the end you seek
Make as many friends in your progress
too, as you can, and no enemies.-[ Gin
cinnati Trade List.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

GATHERING UP THE FRAGMENTS
One of the jewelry manufacturers Of
this city recently put down new floor
ing in his workshop, and the gold
he obtained by burning the old floor
ing not only paid for the new one, but
for putting two coats Of paint on the
entire factory. In another the hands
all work on a sort of bracket standing
ont from the bench in front of them, so
that the filings of gold may fall on a tin
plate below, and be returned to. the
melting room. The greatest care is ex-
ercised to prevent waste. The floors,
benches and seats are carefully swept
every evening, and the sWeepings. put
ayay to have the gold removed from
them by chemical process. Every now
and then aprons, benches, stools, and
even the flooring, are burnt to get the
cold out of them. Even brushes, clothes,
cotton, wool and rags are burned. Ihe
average quantity of gold saved annually
| in this way in the factory is about S00, ,00t
worth. Ali the water in which the tive
hundred employees wash their hands If
| filtered four times, and the amount
Of gold recovered from it averages about
$4,000 a year A barrel of sWeeplngs
viii fetch four dollars and o half {
pound; and even after they have, al
| they think, extracted all the gold from
| them, they sell the refuse to the smelter
at nine cents and even as high as clever
cents pound Newark Daily Adyer
/ fiSpp z-sasz4 AZ z-.. 81
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

GRAVEYARD WIT.-An Irishman who
had been employed at the cemetery some
time since, went to Washington to draw
his pay. After receiving the amount,
the paymaster, discovered a sabre-cut in
his face, remarked, "YOu were in the
army during the war?"
"Yes,' said he.
"What command were you in?"
"In General Fitz Hugh Lees COM
mand, sir"
"Did you have the audacity to apply
to Federal cemetery for work when
you were in the rebel army?"
yes, replied the Irishman; az helped
to kill them, so thought I had q right
to help to bury them"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

TAKING HIM DowN.-At a country
church a young minister, a great swell,h
came to do duty one Sabbath. Entering
the vestry, he doffed his coat and vest
previous to donning the cOssack and
cloak, and looked round for the looking
glass which generally forms part of the
vestry furniture. He searched, however,
in vain. At last, losing patience, he
cried out, "Church Otisaw! church Off
saw" After calling out some time, the
| the door; Ua and I stentorian % voice ] demand al d.
ed, whats yer wull?" Where's the
mirraw?" demanded the minister. "Sir7'
said the other. "The mirraw-the look
ing glass ~ said the minister, impatient
ly. go, the lOOl1in' glass. Ye see, oOr,
minister's sich a handsum man naturally,
that he dOsna need lOOkin' glass; but
I'll bring ye pail O. waiter, if ye like"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An old joker who was never known to
yield the palm to any antagonist in reel
ing knOtty yarns, was put to his trumps
at hearing traveller state that he once
saw brick house placed upon runners
and drawn up q hill to q more favorable
location, some half mile distant.
"What do you think of that, uncle
Ethiel?" said the bystanders.
"Oh fudge" said the old man; IOnce
saw two story stone house, down East,
drawn by oxen three miles!"
A dead silence ensued; the old man
evidently had the worst of it, and he saw
it. Gathering all his energies, he bit off
huge quid of tobacco, by the way of
gaining time for thought.
"They drawed the stone house, said
the old man, "but that warn't the worst
of the job; for, after they d done that,
they went back and drawed the CELLAR
The stranger gave in.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

"Oh! It was Pitiful, and this is the
way Max Adeler tells it:
We shall never forget that evening
we spent at Magruder's years ago. We
admired Miss Magruder, and we went
around to see her. 1t was summer time
and moonlight, and she sat upon the
Diazza. The carpenter had been there
that day glueing up the rustic chairs Oh
the porch, so we took seat on q step
in front of Miss Magruder, where we
could gaze in her eyes and drink in hel
smiles. Tt seems probable that the car
nenter must have upset his glue pot or
the spot where we sat, for after enjoy.
ing Miss Magruder's remarks for {
cO1Dle of hours, and drinking several O1
her smiles, we tried to rise, for tht
purpose of going home, but found tha
we were immoyably fixed to the step
Then Miss Magruder said, Don't be il
a hurry" and we told her we wouldn't
The conversation had q sadder tone af
| teri that, and we sat there think
| ing whether it would be better to asl
Miss Magruder to withdraw while W,
| disrobed and went home in Highlant
costume, or whether we should urge he
to warm up the poker, or whether W
should give one terrific wrench an.
I then GtHIU1G uOWu OHG yttlu DhCh" I!
About midnight Miss Magrudef yawned
and said she believed she would go t
bed. Then we suddenly asked her
she thought her father would have an
objection to lending us his front step
a few days because we wanted to tax
them home for a pattern. We thin
Miss Magruder must have entertaine
doubts Of our sanity, for she rushed il
called her father and screamed. Ma
gruder came down with a double-baI
relied gun. Then we explained the SIT
nation in a whisper, and he procured
saw and cut off the piece of step
which we were attached. Then "
went home wearing the patch, and b'
fore two o'clock crushed out our lo1
FLOR Miss Magruder. We never calle
; again, and she threw herself away on
dry goods man. There is melancho
, satisfaction in recalling these memoirs
Of youth, and reflection upon the il
fluence OF glue upon the emotions
the human heart.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

The henpecked man, says Josh Billings
liz most generally married; but there.are
instances on the record of single men
being harrassed by the pullets. Youcan
alwus tell one Ov these kind Ov men, es-
peshily if they are in the company of
their wives. They look as resigned tew
their fate az hen turkey on wet day.
Thare aint nothing that will take the
starch out ov man like being pecked
by a woman. 1t is wus than a seven
months ov the fever and agy. The wives
of henpecked husbands most alwus out
live their victims, and l have known
them to get married agin, and git hold
of man that time (thank the Lord y who
| understands all the henpecled lodges.
One of these kind ov husbands izan honor
to his sex. The henpecked man, when
he gets out amongst men, puts on air
| ov bravery and defiance, and once in a
while will git leetle drunk and then go
home with firm resolve that he will be
captain of his households; but the old
woman soon takes the glory out of him,
and handles him just as she would half
| grown chicken, who had fell into swill
barrel, and had to be jerked out awful
| quick.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02
MeSmeFiC Power

A curious case of mesmerism is re-
ported by the civil s1lrgeonOf HOsbuga
bad. A young woman named Nunnee,
aged "a, was married some twelve years
ago; she, however, did not go to her
husband'shOmef for two years afterwards.
After staying with him eight days she
suddenly became insensible, and re-
manned so for two OF three days. She
was taken to her mother and soon got
well. Then follows q very remarkable
history. During the next four OF five
years she never entered her husbands
house without falling insensible and
remaining so. He was very kind and
attentive to her, she liked him, but
whenever he came into her presence
she at once sank into this state. This
went on till she became emaciated and
exhausted, and at last her parents ap-
piled to the court for a separate main
tenance for her. While she was in the
court her husband entered and she be-
came insensible, and was carried to the
attended by Dr.Cullen, in March, 1879
While in this state her pulse was even
| breathing soft, her body plant, but
she could eat nothing. While she wa1
in her bed her husband was mutfled up
and made to walk through the ward
| She said she felt he was near her, anC
she was by no means well, but had no
seen him anywhere about. Next day
this experiment was repeated and she
actually became insensible as before
When the husband left the place sh'
recovered. The experiment as to tn
influence of the husbands presenc
was tried in all sorts of ways. He wa
made to pass behind her, and to be nea
her in separate ward, but this had n
effect; but whenever he was brought t.
look on her face, though muffled up, 0
disguised as a policeman, as a SepOy
and so forth, she wasat once influenced
The experiments continued for q mont
and the conclusion was that the hus
band uncOnsciOusly mesmerized hel
The court came to the conclusion tina
lit was impossible for her to live wit
him, and separate allowance was OIL
dered. The husband was asked to tr
if he could not remove the etfec
seeing that he had the power to caus
it, but he was quite frightened at tn
idea of having the power, and could NJ
control it in any way.-[The Homewar
Mail.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

"Atom," of the Harvard Advocate,
visited the French fair, and thus reports
Young lady" Sir, wouldn't you like
to buy some tickets in punch bowl 2"
AtOm-''NO, thank you; never drink"
Young lady (insinuatingly) -" Well,
wouldn't you like to buy some cigars
then?"
Atom with very grave face)-"No,
thank you; never smoke"
Young lady dosing Well,
/ would offer you some soap if thought
yOl1 ever washed.n
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An East Hartford toad was discovered
some time ago near bee hive, actually
at work catching and eating bees. The
owner of the bees, with Characteristic
kindness of heart, tenderly picked up
fbe creature and carried him half mile
away. The next morning that Identical
toad was back again at the old stand,
actively at work. as before. He again
took him up. carried him q long mile
away, and dropped him, but IN twenty
| four hours no was back again, reducing
the number of bees as successfully as
ever, The toad was marked.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02
nav GOODS, GROCERIES, &C.
TUsT ARRIVED:
Ladies, Read the News!

Ladies, Read the News!
CAMILLE ROOS
Having lust returned, by last boat, from New
Orleans, with a FULL and BEAUTIFUL STOCK
OF MERCHANDISE, invites all, both Ladies
and Gentlemen to call and examine his stock
which they will find complete in every article
they may need.
CENTS FINE READY-MADE CLOTHING,
GENTS FURNISHING GOODS,
HATS, GLOVES, ETC,
LADIES' VERY FINE DRESS GOODS, such as
FINE GRENADINES, s.-
BLACK AND CoLORED ALPACAs,
MOURNING GOODS,
JAPANESE CLOTHS, (all shades and pricesO
A FINE ASSORTMENT OF HOSIERY,
LADIES' MISSES AND CHILDREN'S TRIM
MED HATS,
LATEST STYLES OF SHOES,
Also a full stock of
PROVISIONS, GROCERIES,
HARDWARE, WOODENWARE, TINWARE,
TOBACCO, CIGARS, WHISKY, ANIsETTE,
&C &C. &C.
At very low prices to suit the times.
FINE JAPANESE CLOTHS at frQm Is to 25 cts
per yard.
CHOICE FLOUR (guaranteeD at S11 per barrel
Highest prices paid for
COTTON, HIDES, WOOL,
And all other produce, at
CAMILLE ROOs',
Cor. Main and North Streets, Ope1ousas.
apFii5-tf -
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

A Missourian who stole kiss from q
pretty girl, was fined by magistrate,
hOrsewhipped by her brother, and wor-
ried into a brain fever by his wife. The
clergyman also alluded to the affair in his
sermon; the local editor took sides with
the clergyman and reviewed the case in
print, and the pOtatO-bugs ate up every
blade of the malefactor's wheat crop.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

RATHER MIxED.-A family of this
county afford the following labrinthian
problem of relationship, which we sub
nit for the curiosity Of the curiously
disposed:
Miss Linnie T. Maddox; George B.
Threlkeld, my nephew, married Miss
Addie Maddox, my fathers Wife's sister.
NV father has children by my step
mother, and my nephew has children by
his present wife-my step-mothers sis
ter. Both my father und nephew We're
previously married and have children by
their first wives. | am puzzled to know
the relationship which now exists be-
tween my fathers and my nephew's
children to each other and to myself.
Further, my sisters, Mamie and Ma
lissa Threlkeld, married father and son,
| CW. d. Alexander, and his son, II. M.
| AIexander.1 Therefore, father and
son became brothers-in-law. Geo. b.
ThrelkeId,s-m nephew-fTst wife was
| a Miss Alexander-W. D. Alexander's
niaca and r.. NJ. Alexander's cousin.
George B. Threlkeld, by his first mar
rage, became his step fathers uncle,
and also great-uncle to his step brother,
and his step-brother became his uncle
bv marriage with his present wife-my
sister. The question of relationship be-
tween the families is the point we are
anxious to have solved.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

"Unless you give aid" said a beggar
to a benevolentlady, am afraid shall
have to resort to something which I
very much dislike to dO.' The lady
handed him dollar, and compassionate
ly asked, "What Is it, poor man, that
have saved you from?h Work" was
the mOulnful answer.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

Marrying a deceased wife's sister i'm
plies either that the husband has treated
his first wife very kindly or very cruelty.
If kindly, the sister wishes to experience
the same treatment; if cruelty, to
'aVenge it,
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An Irishman called at drug store to
get bottle Of JOhnson's Anodyne Lini-
ment for the rheumatism; the druggist
asked him in what part of the body it
troubled him most, "Be me SOUL" said
he, 81 have it in livery houl and corner
uY mo.n
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02
- 2 ER...T.TTHE N ID b.

- I'M ri rg! E.VIEETREg. LUnEREK =
Choice Cypress and Pine Lumber, OF every
dimensions and III unlimited quantities, SUD
nliesl by the undersigned at Mount PIeasalll
Ife III 81 chain l,sss. and viii fiji with prompt
mess and dispatch ali bills entrusted 10 rs.
Orders addressed to Tie undersig gned, AZ ~ ash
irsstOn viii receive Immediate attention
an kinds and any AMOUNT OF Seasoned LumDel
always On hand, at Reduced Prices.
Terms Cash ct the mil.
FRANK MCNIGoIlL.
Mt. Pleasant Mills, July s, 1871.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

"Who was the meekest man, my son ~
said the superintendent of boys Bible
class in this State. "MOses, sir" Every
well, my boy, and who was the meekest
woman 7" please sir, there never was
the meCkeSt WOman.n
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An innocent person was looking for a
certain dye-hOuse in New York, when
wag pointed to the morgue and said: /" I
don't know where the dye-house is, sir,
but there's the dead-house."
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

A spread eagle orator wanted the
wings of a bird to fly to every town and
country, to every village and hamlet in
the broad land, but he wilted when a
naughty boy in the crowd sang out
you'd be shot for a goose before you
had flown q mile"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

A rogue was charged with obtaining
goods by false pretences. He pleaded
that he failed to see how a pretence
could be other than false.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

How TO TREAT SLANDER.-We once
heard a story told of two men who
started together one bright morning for
q whole days journey. They soon be-
came separated. The one reached his
destination before the sun had sunk be-
hind the hills, where he made himself
comfortable at the inn. His only trouble
was concern for his laggard companion.
He thought surely some evil must have
befallen him.
Long after dark, his fellow traveller
arrived. When asked the cause Of his
delay, he replied: ~
81 was obliged to stop at every house
to whip off the unmanerly dogs that
barked at me. Didn't they bark at you
Eyes" replied the other, "but I did
not stop to whip them. | simply told
| they were ill-bred ours and drove on!p
We are generally losers in the end il
we stop to refute all the backbitings
and gossipings we may hear by the way
They are annoying, it is true, but not
dangerous, so long as we do not stop tt
eynostulate and scold. Our character
are formed and sustained by ourselves
by our actions and purposes, not by 9th
/ eyg. Always bear this in mind, tha
calumniators may usually be trusted t.
time and the slow but.steady justice O
public opinion.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An old lady says the old fashioned
birch switches do the girls more good
than the new switches manufactured
from the bark of the redwood tree fol-
young ladies.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

A drawing room car is good place
for a man to get married in, for there he
can become familiar with the sound Of
the rail.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

NINE Wars TO COMMIT SUICIDE
Wear narrow, thin shoes.
9. Wear a 'snugn corset.
8. Sit up in hot, unventilated rooms
till midnight.
4. Sleep on feathers in a small, close
3 Eatfoodrapidly and atirregular times
6. Use coffee, tea, spirits and tobacco geo
| tinnaries and sWeetmeats, andsWallow q
| few nateDt medicines to get rid of them
3. Marry a fashionable wife and live
beyond your income.
q Employ fashionable and needy
/ doctor to attend you in every slight all
ment.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

.Where are the men of 1872 shouted
a stump orator. dead" responded a
sad looking man in the middle
aisle.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

A leading New York professor of the
Terpsichorean art received the follow
ing letter from Albany: "Sir, being
anxious to learn dancing, [ write to
know how long you would think | would
take to become proficient. You will al
so kindly state your terms, and let me
know if it would not be possible to IN
struct me by letter, as | should not like
simply be for the sake of q young lady
residing here. Hoping to receive an
early answer, believe me, etc.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02

An unsatisfactory meal-a domestic
brOil.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1873-08-02
We notice that quite number of oul

We notice that quite q number of our
country contemporaries are adopting
the ''patent outsides." That is to say,
they are having the outside pages of
their papers printed i'll st. Louis and 9TH
er cities. We cannot conceive what
economy they find in this plan, other
than that of labor to the publisher of
the paper. But there is serious doubts
as to whether this may be considered
as actual economy after all. We look
upon this species of journalism as a
sort of imposition upon the public, or in
other words an imposition upon the
people in the communities where these
papers are supposed to be published,
| for this reason: When citizen sub
scribes for his home paper, he reason
ably expects that paper to be devoted
| to home interests and to diffusion of
useful rH information for him. Now, if
this paper is edited and printed in part
| thousands of miles away from the town
| and parish where it purpOrts to be pub
lished in whole, how can it repre-
sent him and his interests to the
world or give him such information as
NAV be applicable only to his locality.
| Therefore, how can man in Missouri
or Illinois edit local country paper for
the people of any of the Louisiana par
ishes2. Instead, then, of the local read
ers of such papers getting selected mat
ter such as will interest them, and ben
eft them in their peculiar callings
! known only to the editor who lives
a neighbor, they get mass OF common
place selections mostly winding up as a
Duff for some patent medicine, publish
ing house or some other things which
interests them about as much as fairy
nursery stories for children. It would
be far better for the press of Louisiana
if the publishers thereof would aban-
don this plan, and edit and print then
own papers. 1t might strain their brain
their nerves and their pockets for g
time, but in the end they would find 6
wider range of influence, q better list
of patrons and above all a confidence il
the home people that they will nevel
gain, but to the contrary lose ifthey eve1
had it, by patronizing the patent out
side system. IF journal wishes or ex
poets to be successful and gain the con
fidence and respect of his own people
he must edit and publish his paper a
home. And all who do not do so ",
. consider to be "penny wise and pount
, foolish. u Baton Rouge Gazet-Comet