Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1873-06-04

y
by the name of Filkins-I disremem-
Der his first name-Dut he was q
trump-come into prA'r meeting
drunk one night, hooraying for Nix
on becuz he thought 1t was a prima-
ry; and old Deacon Ferguson up and
scooted him through the window,
and he lit on old Miss Jefferson g
head-poor old filly. She was a good
soul-had q glass eye, and used to
lend il to Miss Wagner, that hadn't
any, to receive company in. Ii
warn't big enough, and when Miss
Wagner warn't noticing, 1t would get
twisted around in the socket, and
look up, maybe, or out to one side and
every which way, while tother was
looking as straight ahead as q spy
glass. Grown people didn't mind 1t,
but it most always made the children
cry, it was so sort Of scary. She tried
packing 1t in raw cotton, but 1t
wouldn't work, somehow the cot
ton would get loose and stick OUT
and look so kind Of awful that the
children couldn't stand it no way
She was always dropping it out, and
turning M her old headlight on the
company empty, and making them
uncomfortable, beeuz she never could
tell when it popped out, being thnd
on that side, you see. So, somebody
would have to hunch her, and say,
"Your game eye hez fetched loose.
Miss Wagner, dear" and then all OF
them would have to sit and wait till
she jammed it in again-wrong side
before, generally, and as a birds egg.
being a bashful eretur and easy sot
back before company. But being the
wrong side before warn't mnch differ
ence any way, becuz her own eye was
sky blue, and the glass one was yal-
Ter on the front side, 50 whichever
side she turned it, it didn't match no
how. Old Miss Wagner was consid-
erable on the borrow, she was. When
she had quilting party or Dorcas so
ciety at her house. she gen'ally Dor
rowed Miss Higgins wooden leg TO
stump around on it was eonsidera'
bly, shorter than her other pin, but
much she minded that. She said she
couldn't abide crutehes when she had
company, becauz they were SO slow.
When she had company, and things
had to be done, she wanted to get up
and hump herself. She was as bald
as a Judge, and so she had to borrow
Miss Jacobs wig-Miss Jacobs was
the coffin peddlar's wife-a ratty old
buzzard he was, that used to go root
ing around where people was sick,
waiting for them and there that old
rip would sit all day in the shade, on
a coffin that he judged would it the
candidate; and If it was q slow GUS
toner and kind Of uncertain, he'd
fetch his ration and q blanket, and
sleep in the coffin nights.
He was anchored out that way in
frosty weather for about three weeks,
once, before old Robbins place, wait
ing for him and after that, for as
much as two years, Jacobs was not on
speaking terms with the old man, on
account Of his disappointing him. He
got one Of his feet froZe, and lost
money, too, becuz old Robbins took
q favorable turn and got well. The
next time Robbins got sick Jacobs
tried to make up with him, and var
nished up the same old coffin and
fetched it along with him but old
Robbins was too many for him be
had him in, and 'peared to be power
full weak he bought the coffin for
ten dollars, and Jacobs was to pay ii
back and twenty-five more besides il
Robbins didn't like the coffin after
he'd tiled it. And then Robbins died,
and at the funeral he busted off the
lid, and riz up in his shrOud, and told
= hea -. leaf Nkn r.ovsfOrrra.
anees, becuZ he couldn't stand such 8
coffin as that. You see he had been
in a trance once before, when he was
young, and he took the chances on
another, cal'lating that If he made the
trip it was money in his pocket, and
If he missed fire he couldn't lose q
cent. And, by George, ne sued ia
eobs for the rhino, and got judgment,
and he set up the coffin in his back
parlor, and said he lowed to take his
time now. 1t was always an aggra-
vation to Jacobs, the way that miser-
able old thing acted. .
He moved back to Indiany pret.
ty soon-went to Wellesville-Welles-
vile was the place the Hogadoms was
from. Mighty fine family. Old Mary
land stock. Old Squire HogadOm
could carry around more mixed lick.
er, and cuss better than most any
man ever see. His second wife was
the Widder Billings-she that was
Becky Martin /; her dam was deacon
Donlap's first wife. Her Oldest child.
Maria, married a missionary and died
in graee-et up by savages. They ct
him too, poor fellOw-biled him. 1t
wasn't the custom, so they say, but
they explained to friends Of his'n that
went down there to bring away his
things, that they'd tried missionaries
every other way and never could get
any good out OF iem-and so itannoy-
ed all his relations to find that mans
life was fooled away just out Of derned
experiment, so to speak. But mind
you, there amt anything ever really
lost; everything that people can'tun
derstand and don't see the reason ol
does good, If you only hold on and
give 1t a fair shake Providence don't
fire no blank cartridges boys. Thai
there missionary's substance, boys,
unbeknown to himself, actually con-
verted every last one Of them heath
ems that took chance at the barbe-
cue. Nothing ever fetched them but
that. Don't tell me it was an acei
dent he was billed. There amt nc
such thing as an accident.
"When my uncle Lem was leaning
up agin scafFold once, sick or drunk
or suthin', an Irishman with hod
fulIrof bricks fell on him out of the
third story and broke the old mans
back in two places. People said II
was an accident. Much accident
there was about that. He didn't
know what he wss there for, but be
was there for a good object. II he
hadn't been there the Irishman would
have been killed Nobody can evel
make me believe anything different
from that. Uncle LENS dog Twas
there. Why didn't the Irishman fall
on the dog? Beeuz the dog would q
seen him a coming and stood from
under. That's the reason the dog
weren't appinted. A dog can't be
depended on to carry out q special
providence. Mark my words, 1t was
a put-up thing. Accidents don't hap
pen, boys. Uncle LENS dog-I wish
YOU could q seen that dog. He was
a regular shepherd-splendid animal,
belonged to q Parson Hagar before
Uncle Lem got him.
Parson Hagar belonging to the
West tern Reserve Hagars-prime fam
ily his mother was a Weston one
of his sisters married q Wheeler
they settled in Morgan county, and
he got nipped by the machinery of q
carpet factory and went through in
less than a quarter Of a minute. His