Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1873-09-02
An Old Story Re-told.

The following well>known enecdote is en-
barked again on mirth provoking trip. 1t
has been laughed at often already:
physician, wishing to instruct his pupil
in the mysteries of nedcne took hin. to n
patient who was confined to his he'd
"Sir, said the physician to the sick man.
"you have been mprudent; you have eaten
oysters"
The patient confessed that lie had. When
the physician returned home. the pupil asked
him how he came to discover that the man
had eaten oysters.
"Why." replied he, Il saw some oyster
shells under the bed
Shortly after this he sent his pupil to pay
visit to the same person; hnt he soon re-
turned, saying that he had been turned out
of the house.
"Why SO ?" asked the physician.
'tSimply, SIR replied the pupil, FOR say
ing that Mr.. \. had been imprudent-that
he had eaten horse"
ga horse. you blockhcad . and how could
you say so 2"
because of the symptoms, sir
"Wbat symptoms, you i%noramus
"Why, L saw saddle and stirrups under
the bed ~
INCIDENT OF WAn-It was the second
battle Of Bnl Run that cannon ball carried
off poor old soldiers leg
''Carry me t" the rear !n cried to q tall
Yankee companion who had been fighting BIZ
his side
The Yankee caught the wounded soldier
up, and as he WAS about to :.,lt him across his
shoulders, another cannon ball carried away
the poor fellows heal. Tho Yankee, how>
ever, in the confusion, did not notice this, but
proceeded with his burden towards the rear.
What are you carrying that thing off for !"
cried an officer.
Ching" returned the soldier cts
man with his leg shat of"
"Why, he hasn't any head ~ cried the
officer
The Yankee looked at lis load, and for the
first time saw what the officer said was true.
Throwing down the body he Numbered out
''Confound him ! he told nc it was his lce!''
The following tossts was pronounced at
fireman's dinner, end wns received with
great applause: The Ladios--Their eyes
kindle the only fame against which there is
no Insurance."
= An Eastern clerk hns sgch an intense
dread of Cholera morbus shat he will not kiss
q woman whose lips are not rinn.
ON, What IN the world put EnatrImOuy
in your head ?' 'Wel the fact is, Joe, I
was getting short of Shirts
An Ohio girl ATTEMPTED suicide because
boil came the end of her nose the n.it
she was going to dance
"A graveyard inscription in Kentucky
reads thus: Poor 10, his head is level now
if it never was before"
There is in town so bow>lccecd
that he has to have his brecches cut out with
a circular saw.
a cynic describes marriage as an alter
of which man lays his wallet and woman her
affections.
"This is the rock of oges," said father,
after rocking two hours, and the baby still
awake.
"A true American is too proud to beg and
o.honest to steal. He gets trusted.
Whisky is said to be horn Of plenty, be-
cause it will corn you copiously.
Spots of the sun-Frccklcs On your
boys face.
- How to cut swel-Turn your back on
him.
Fec slmpIe-Moncy given quack doc
tor.
- bad place to get out at-Thc elbow
- Fergcrs to be encouraged Blacksmiths.
Power of evil-A power of attorney.
A rare fiowcr-Pink of politcness.
"A regular upsct-Thc ballooncst.