The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1873-02-15
WIT AND WISDOM.

QUERY-If a man catches small pO1
while in prison, does it follow that he will
surely break out.
Some men require more than that before
breakfast.
WESTERN widow would like to meet
the printer who, when she advertised for
an agent, made her to appear to want
"a gent.
A GENTLEMAN in Boston horse car Was
heard to remark that he knew upwards Of
fifty native Americans who had Tartars for
wives.
A RICHMOND man sings with fervor and
considerable voice, +" would not live al
ways" His immediate neighbors would
not that he should.
An instance Of throwing ones self about
was witnessed a few evenings ago At q
party, in the case If q young lady who,
when asked to sing, first tossed her head
and then pitched her voice.
A SYMPATHETIC Norwich man stopping
in Boston, on learning that to check the
hre great many buildings must be blown
up, at once offered to contribute his moth
er-n-law for the purpose.
81 SHOULD have no objection to my
wife's relgning, said an affectionate hus-
band, If it were not for the fact that
when she reigns she is 80 apt to storm
also.
A LITTLE four year old beset his mother
to talk to him and say something funny.
How can III she asked don't you see
how busy ! am baking these pies XII We'll,
you might say Charley, won't you have q
PIE That would be funny for you f'
AN Indianapolis man took his boy up
stairs to whip him, a. requested by hIs
step-mother but his tender feelings pre-
vailed. and he told the urchin tO take his
coat of, hang it up, and yell Justify while
1t was whipped. The boy obeyed orders,
but spoiled his chances for similar future
clemency by telling his experience to
a neighbor.
A DASBURY iaan, whose wife kindles the
fires, and gets the room warm enough for
him to move round comfortably without
putting ON his neither garments, sat down
sunday morning on a char which was al
ready occupied by scalding hot lid holder.
He has had a new plaster put on himself,
and some on the ceiling Just above the
chair, and now kindles the hre himself.
An exchange notices death caused By
the accidental falling III brick upon the
head w a man, who Sas passing under a
scatfold, while building was being erect
ca. An inquest was held and the coroner
brought i'll verdict AZ follows Death
caused by sOftenlng ot the brain in cOnse-
quence " the accidental falling of brick
upon the man : head
one of Charles Lambs friends visiting
him with his wife and children, happened,
IN the course Of his conversation to repeat
the old saying, "One fool makes many
"Ah, indeed, said Lamb, merrily, point
ing to the children, you have a 1ne fam
lily.
II the depths Of the sea the waters are
still; the heaviest grief Is that borne IN 81
lence the deepest love flows through the
heart and touch the purest Joy Is unspeak-
able the most impressive preacher at a
funeral IS the silent ons whose lips are cold.
GREAT thoughts belong only and truly To
him whose mind can hold them No mat
ter who irst put them Id words, If they
come % a soul and NIL II they belong III II,
whether they Hoatsd on tile voice NJ others
Or pa the wings NJ silence ana the night
A LAZY dyspeptic was bewailing lii own
misfortune, and speaking with friend Ou
the latter hearty appearance. What dO
you % tO make yourself 80 s5rOng and
healthyi inquired the dyspeptic Live
on truIt alone, answered the friend.
What kind of fruit n "The fruit Of IN
dustry and | sm never troubled with in
dustry and I am never troubled with in
digestion
Mr.. ALCoTT, who is = hard rider on the
vegetable hobby, once SAID 20 DR. Walker
OF Harvard College II think that when
man lives on beef he becomes something
like an OK if he eats mutton he begins
70 look sheepish and if he eats pork, may
he not grow To be swinish That may
he, said Dr. Walker, but when man
lives N nothing Tut vegetables | think he
y apt ~ be pretty small potatoes