Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1873-01-16
GENERAL ITEMS.

II uc lcdp-yCSI sly IL VI pOppluS luC QucS-
ton was "Dont you want me to wash the
dishes for your"
MATT. MORGAN has been offered the job of
painting ''worm-kiler" signs along the New
York Central Railroad.
IT is said Father Burke has made 100000
for various benevolent institutions out of his
lectures, and Froude $4,000
GovERNoR-ELECT HENDRICKS, of Indiana,
is now digniied by the added title of the
'net result of the tidal-wave."
JOHN JACOB AsroR has given $50, 900 to-
wards the endowment of St. Luke's Hospital
EpiscopaD in the city of New York.
A CHARGE of 25 cents admission to church
weddings in Missouri furnished fund for
young couple to start housekeeping with
CHARLES w. KENDALL Congressman from
! Nevada, was married November 28th, at
Fall River, Massachusetts, to Miss Laura E.
Arnzer.
THE city editor of Dayton, Ohio, paper,
a young man of great promise at one period
of his life, is now a candidate for Mayor of
| that town. .."
| IT cost an Italian editor about all he was
worth to say that ''King Victor Emanuel is
the most repulsive looking man we have
| ever seen."
A TlrUsvnLE oil prince has papered his
| house with ten-forty bonds, which are re-
| lieved by handsome border of ten-dOllar
| greenbacks.
| guardians of their ''Home" to either ''set up
| nobler grub or close the caboose." The ca
b0ose is closed.
A SooroHMAN asked an Irishman why far
| things were coined in England, and Pats an
| swei was, ''to give Scotcbmen all opportu-
| nifty to subscribe to charitable institutions"
THE Vermont Legislature did one good
thing at its late session. They made it mis-
demeanor for any one to point gun or pistol
or any kind of fire arm at another, even in
sport. . ..
II WANT to know said creditor, fierce
ly, "when you are going to pay me what you
owe'me ?" "When I'm going to pay? Why,
you're pretty fellow! Do you take me for
| prophets" +~:. 5s#
THE Chicago Post says it is confidently ex-
pected that of the sixty-fye members of the
Yale school of journalism one or two may
sometimes gaze foolshly into the paste-pot
of a country weekly. " b. -. #..-.t. ..'..
The taxable valuation of Minnesota this
year is $110, 0O0, ,00O-$20, 100000 more than
last year and Mr.. Pennock Pusey, the ex-
perienced statistician, estimates the population
of the State at 528, 900. .-''"
A MArRoNnY lady in Virginia City, Ne
vada, went into a barber shop, had her hair
cut tight to her skull, and then INDUCED in a
shampoo. She remarked that she had not
felt so we'll since she was young and used to
go in swimming. -
New ALBANY, Indiana, has an Enoch Ar
den, who proposes to stay around and put
head on the man that fills his place in Mrs.
Arden's affections, after which he don't care
what becomes of himself He will run for
postmaster or sheriff. t-' ~'" >'''
Mrs. L1vERMoRE. informs US that the feet
of the coming women are on the mountain
top, and that her spirit is of the mountain
air. This is very nice; but if the coming
woman is to be Of any practical value, she
had better come down from there. by: ''
MAX MULLER has discovered that person
of good education and usual f1uency of speech
uses, in general conversation, only between
three and four thousand words. Close rea-
soners use larger number, anu eloquent
speakers cannot get along with less than ten
thousand. ;.i " 'P5 |. '*.
The great grandfather of Thomas Ed
wards died at one hundred and four; but his
father died at the early age of sixty-seven.
His young son Edward, now only ninety
five, recklessly committed matrimony with
chit of seventy. That is what comes of be-
ing an unadvised orphan. -g.eI u Lt~itl;5.
A BILL has been introduced in the Ohio
Legislature for steam passenger and freight
elevator in the Senate wing of the Capitol
building Whenever Senator becomes OBJ
stinate or troublesome they propose to jerk
him heavenward by means of that arrange
ment, and keep him there until he becomes
as meek and docile as lamb. =.
EDMUND YATES, the English novelist,
weighs 400 pounds, and travels in nine over
coats. He is well well pleased, so far, with
this country, and the reception he has met
with. He praises the daily journals of the
larger cities very highly. He considers the
Nation the ablest of our weeklies, and
the accumulations of news by the New York
Herald perfectly wonderful. 4nu 4a }ra,i .
The New York Nation, in referring to the
failure of Bowles Brothers, says that as 3
general rule s'all bankers who. besides keep
ing your money, offer to run errands for you,
and black your boots, and carry your par
GELS, and take you to the milliner's, and the
and the trOusseaux shop, and
find peanuts, squash pie, buckwheat cakes
and baked beans for you in Paris, are so far
dangerous. b9.rela .9T5aai - it8 asas
A Dowx-EAsr DOCTOR, Dio Lewis by name.
is worrying himself severely about the food
of our Americans. They eat too much meat,
he says, and ought to limit themselves to an.
imal diet once . day, and that only 70 cold
weather. IL the professional theor1zer would
experiment on ten hours work p ~ Win
pick and shovel or sledge hammee q Y pos
= reformation.