The Van Buren press., 1873-02-25
MISCELLANY.
The Husbands Lesson

pressing ncr mana 10 her be"luei ~
brow "Wcll, | declare cant exactly
remember what did with it. .
That is singular very singular, in
deed ~ eracularjy observed her husband
a fussy, bald headed little man "AuC
how am to wind the clock without tn,
KEY, Id like to know2 never forget
Mrs Farquhsr Did you ever know me
to forget? And the long and short OF
the matter is, that shall have to buy a
new clock key--a new clock key, Mrs
Farquhar, just at this time, Of all others
when our expenses are 30 o yer whelm
ing,
A man with wife and six children
cannot expect to live for nothing, " said
Mrs. Farquhar compossdly " Starch,
soap, candles, flannel
Yes, yes--exacsly so, said Mr.. Far
quhar But have no time to argue
the matter this morning
And if you had, mercilessly per
sisted Mrs Farquhar, " Yon might argue
from now until doomsday without alter
ing the state ofafairs Here is your hat,
nv dear; and don't forget the paregoric.
and Willie shoes; and Harry's hat, snd
the Plumbers bill.
The long bushes. day lapsed slowly
away, and Mr. Farquhsr "eturnod home
Just as the gray shadows OF dusk were
closing greatly rejoicing
Fifty dollsrs clear gain, said he,
rubbing his palms together as he sat BY
the tea table. Jones borrowed is Of
me a month ago, spd when heard he
had sailed for California put it down rs
a dead loss Never expected 10 see or
hear from the man again, and when he
turned up to day with new fifty dollar
bill, | give you my word it seemed just
like present.
And what are YOU going to do with
~" said Mrs Farquhar, who was fasten
ing the babys bib
Il don't kaow--havcat thought yen,
| might so to Washington with Allsa ana
Furguson, and the other fellows
You might, said Mrs Farqaaar
dryly, ana | light have a new c!ask
But think it would he rather more
sensible way Of spending the mon'y 80
pay the doctors bill
Mr. Farquhar laughed
"Wsll. mv dear, don't know but that
you are right, said he, "sal | snes-
you may 60 around and pay + to-mor
rev
The arrival Of Master Tomm, and
and Miss Lizzie, fresh from the nursery,
brekc up all further financial discussions,
and Mr.. Farquhar thrust the bin INTO his
vest pocket
About midnight, Mrs Farquhar awoke
her husband to tell him about the burg
larry next door
"Eh, said Mr., Farquhar, a little un-
easily. "A burglary A, Mr.. Morris Z
and what was taken ~
"Watches - silver - clothing-ever.
thing, said Mrs Farquhsr, lowering her
voics to mysterious whisper In the
dead Of night while the family were all
asleep Lemuel, dear, are you sure you
recollectcd to bolt the front door and
put up the chain p
"Of course l recollsctsd il, said Mr..
Faiquhar a little GROSSLY. make il my
business to rscollect everything Go to
sleep, my dear, and don't fret"
And just as he was sinking off into
delicious slumber, Mr.. Farqnhar be
thought himself Of the fifty dollar bill
Yes, my vest pocket, he meditatsd,
just where the theving scoundrels would
be most apt to lay their hands upon it.
| wish l had sent to pay the doctors
bill tonight, instead Of postponing it up
til to morrow Halloo, though; l have
itw as a bright inspiration flashed into
his drowsy brain,
Nobody would ever dream OF look
ing in an old boot; it viii be safe there
until tomorrow, and III get rid Of it AS
quick as / can. "
Mr.. FarQuhar went to bed and slept
the sleep Of the righteous. And the next
morning, totally oblivieus Of the whole
proceeding he arose and put on his slip
psrs in beaming mood
whats that, Bridgetl bcgger at
the dosrr' he demanded
He says he's no shoes, sir, " said
Bridget, can the toes Of him are on the
bare ground entirely"
Poor fellow And its sharp fros
ty morning, too, said Mr.. Farqnhar.
Give him my old boots, Bridget |
was going to have them halfsolcd, hnt ]
guess this man needs thcn more than |
DO
"Wherc are they, sir2' asked Bridge.
"On the door, by the bed up stairs
Run quick, and don't leave tbs door
open Run, that's a good girl.
The beggarman took tho boots snd
went on his way rejoicing, and JUS rs
Mr. Fsrquhar was buitoning hls over
coat to depart for the regions OF down
town, Mrs Farquhar entered the room
Don't forget to give me tnat hlty
dollar bill, Lemucl. before you ys-ior
the doctor, you remember" "
Mr.. Farquhar's hands dropped to bis
sids--his face turned dead tallowy
tint
"Ths--Hfty-dellar bill, F." repeated
he, mechanically. "Good Heavens It's
gone"
"Gons! Gone wilersf"
' Nr Earouhar made a rush NJ the dOor