Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-01-23

the squash was all right. If there was
any intellectual difference between the
squash and his head, it was in favor OF
the squash.
Well, I practiced and practiced at the
barn door, and could not hit it; and
practiced at the rail, and could not hit
that; and | tried hard for the squash, and
could not hit the squash. I would have
been entirely disheartened, but that
occasionally crippled one of the boys,
and that encouraged me to hope
AT last we began to hear pistol shots
near by, in the next ravine We knew
what that meant The other party were
out practicing, too. Then I was in the
last degree distressed for of course those
people would hear our shots, and thew
would send spies over the ridge, and the
spies would find my barn door without a
wound or q scratch, and that would sim.
ply be the end of me-for of course that
| other man would Immediately become as
BloOdthirsty as 1 was. Just at this mo-
ment a little bird, no larger than spar.
row, flew by, and lit on sage bush about
thirty PAGES away and my little second
Steve ellis, who was a matchless marks
man with a pistol-much better than ]
was -snatched out his revolver, and shot
the birds head off! We all ran to pick
up the game, and sure enough, just at
this moment, some Of the other duellists
came accommodating over the little ridge
They ran to our group to see what the
matter was, and when they saw the bird
Lords second said:
"That was splendid shot. How fal
off was it p
Steve said, with some Indifference:
con No rraat Sictapoo bo,,f
PAGES"
Thirty PAGES! Heavens alive, who
did it?"
"My man-Twain."
"The mischief he did! Can he do that
often?"
''Well-yes. He can do it about-wel]
about four times out of five"
knew the little rascal was lying, but
| never said anything. never told him
so. He was not of a disposition to invite
condolences of that kind, so l let the
matter rest. But it was comfort to see
those people look sick, and see their
under-jaw drop, when Steve made these
statements They went off and got Lord,
and took him home; and when we got
home, half an hour later, there was a
note saying that Mr. Lord peremptorily
declined to fight!
1t was narrow escape. We found out
afterwards that Lord hit has mark thirteen
times in eighteen shots. If he had put
those thirteen bullets through ME, it
would have narrowed my sphere of use
fulness a good deal-would have well
nigh closed it, in fact. True, they could
have put pegs in the holes, and used me
for hatrack; but what is hat-rack to
man who feels he has Intellectual
powerss [ would scorn such a position
l have written this true incident of my
personal history for one purpose, and one
purpose only-to warn the youth of the
day against the pernicious practice of
dueling, and to plead with them to war
against it. I was young and foolish
when [ challenged that gentleman, and I
thought it was very fine, and very grand
to be a duelist, and stand upon the ''field
of honor" But l am older and more
experienced now, and am inf1exibly op-
posed to the dreadful custom. am glad,
indeed, to be enabled to lift up my voice
against it. Think it is bad, immoral
thing. think it is every mans duty to
do everything he can to discourage duel
ing. always do; discourage it upon
every occasion.
If man were to challenge me noao-
now that can fully appreciate the iniqui
ty of that practical would go to that
man, and take him by the hand, and lead
him to quiet, retired room-and kill
him.-7om Hoods Annual.