The Placer herald., 1873-08-02
MY NAME Is JONES.

Ny name is Jones. may also add thai
| am called John. There is nothing re-
markabe about such II cosnomen. In m,
part Of the co ntry you may meet With
many who will turn around when you ntle,
The two words in conjunction. don't com
plain at my fiiher and mother being called
Jones. don't grumhle at my sponsors
giving me the name OF John. Both sounds
are, III my opinion, deci edy euphonous
But do wish hal did not have quite SO
many f.ilove eh"'ing the nppnll,ions Wi
me. You will imd II good mairy john
Jones in the directory You may dlsco>e
'hat about nine live in the same street as !
90. This sort Of ihing has many incon-
veniences. No dohdt the J. j. IS are a
worthy set of men; but still there are black
sleep among them The other day one OF
,he nine WAS sentenced to IL months impris
on'n,nt for beating his wife. Now don
object to his bcaiiug lis wife, if she drserN ed
clHsisemt W lich was 10 doubt the case
Nor am AT all conce ned that it is said he
committed the brutal act when lie WAS il
liquor, and it is further asserted that he Is
III oucully in the same state, and that when
such is the case he il one Of the most dread
ful Llackguard7 that could be possibly i'm
Agined. And do think it is time 10 com
plain when | am mistaken for the Joln
Jones in question, and cut 10y my friends III
consequence.
do think it time TO speak up when ac-
1uantences make = point Of calling ON my
Nl,c with the view Of comfort llg her ant
% nci linz in her regrets That she is alliet
% monster in hum,n form. ] loose my
temper when told that these same fr'nds
have knocked at the doors of six other o
ihe John Jones and asked with commend
,hIe cir, nmocuion and delcirv, when iolo
Of their mistake, 10 be directed 10 the house
Of the JOHN ,Joues who had got himself init,
trouble. do get mp and walk around tl't
room " hen postal cards and letters arr,,
reproachmg me with my crime or coudelin.
wnh my wife. If my neighhor John Jones
wants 10 get drunk and beat his wife, VIII,
lhe dickens can't he adopt some othel
name?
John JONES' But people generally de-
cline TO know me by any such title.
have said that there are about nine j. J.s
IN our street. If you 90 10 The neighbors t.
,sk ile way to my residence, they will ash
whether ,ou refer TO the lean Jones, lhe fat
Jones, the Jones who stominers IN hls
speech, the bow-.egged Jones, the Jones
who once attempted TO cut his throat, ll'
Jones who squins, the Jones Who 'ake'
checks at the ,healer, or the Jones with
I'd face nd a large carLurcic On his nose.
All NV friends call il crhuncle, though
i, le .lity it is only small spot. Indeed
they viii persist in dnhhins me Carlh''d
Jones L. that pleasant The probability
hat my weak pom " ould never be notice.
Il ihere we've not so MANY other fellows cal
ed john Jones " hat want 10 know is.
why these people are so chrislened? Then
parents and guardians might have kiowl
what would be the result. You f el lle
ptlec.s Of being called John Jones n. Christ
mas. S,meines my friends HI lle country
send me hampers continuing all manner n
delacaces which don't improve after the,
have been kept certain number Of days.
Very often the railway men leave the Walt
able goods at some oii'er John jones
The other john Jones frequently remain il
sublime ignorance that the things are 10
meant for him. lie processes to imagine
that they came from some unknown bene-
f4ctor. and makes use of them will, great
freedom. Of course he is sorry when thu
mist Ike is discovered; Of course he Is read,
to hand over what is left of the contents o
the hampers; and, of course, be doesn't for