The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1873-11-28
0IIte arittta 8ournal.
ODDS AND ENDS.

ceeds better az a butter.
The most curious thing in the
world il d woman who is not curious.
A cannibaI's epitaph-Write me
as one who loves his fellow-men.
When onr marshal finds man
full he takes him to the calaboose
and his friends bail him out.
A Marietta man was detected put
ting three cent stamps on postal
cards. lie is one Of the best Of
men.
Two fatigued travellers, having to
travel ten miles further, colnforted
themselves by the calculation that it
was only five miles each.
Jenkins told his son, who propos
ed to buy cow in partnership, to
be sure and buy the hinder half, as
it ca, nothing and gave oil the milk.
An Irish paper concludes biog-
rarhv Of Robcspierrc with the fol,
having sentence: "l'his extraordi-
nary man left NJ children except his
brother. who was killed at the same
time.
A Western paper, in describing
Al, accident, recently, says, with
considerable candor: ''Dr. craw
fmd was called, and under his
prompt and skiilfu treatment, the
,oung man died on Wednesday
night"
My dear" said husband 70 his
wife, on observing new red striped
stockings on his only heir, why
have yon made BARRIERS poles Of our
child's legs T. because he is lit
tie I.aycr,' was the neat reply.
What is the greatest feat in the
eating way ever known 7 That re-
corded Of man who commenced by
boiling a door, after which he threw
up window, and then sat down and
swallowed whole story.
as lawyer was arguing his case,
the Judge interrupted him, saying,
THE court is against you on that
point, counsellor" VERY well, re-
sponded the lawyer, ~ do not rest
my ease on that point alone ! have
several others equally conclusivc!"
A Sodus topper the other night got
at the yeast jug and took swig. -
Putting it down, he called out to his
wife "Say, Jane, wish you
wouldn't mix that chicken feed over
the cider-jug, lis 'nuf to make hog
sick" The yeast made him hop
soon after.
A certain lawyer had his portrait
taken in his favoritc attitudes stand |
ing with one hand in his pocket.
His friends and clients all went to
see il and everybody exclaimed
ooh, how like! it's The very picture
ot him r An old farmer only dis
sen,ed, ,sl'aint like ~ Exclaimed
every body: "Just show US where it
faint like" "Taint--no faint y
responded the farmer, "Don't you
see, he has got his hand in his own
pocket; 'twould be as like again il
he lad it in somebody's else"
A retired merchant hired newly
imported servant girl from the cold
dart" who was somewhat ignorant
of English phrases. One morning
seeing her mistress in loose wrap
per, Biddy asked another servant
what style Of dress that was, and
was informed that il was called
''half undress." Soon after the
merchant handed into the kitchen,
fresh from the vines in his garden,
some tomatoes, telling Biddy to serve
them in an "undressed state
meaning of course, raw. Dinner
uuie came, and everything was Oh
the table except the tomatoes. The
bel. was rung and on Biddy's APP
poarance abe was asked for them.
She hastily retired, and soon pre-
scented herself with nothing on but a
single under garment, saying "Aara,
sure, TN now in an undrossed state
as much as | name to be, and, be-
gorra, l'llnot strip off another rag
even If get my discharge She
was told to dress herself and expect
higher wages.
Stealing bis wifc's store teeth is
the way Des Moines man has of
stopping her gadding.
Why is blindman's buff like SYM
pathyf Because it is fellow feel
ing for a fellow creature.
A medical writer has lately as
serted that ''physic is the art of
amusing the patient while nature
cures the disease"
a girl of the season comments
thus on Mormonism: GLOW alb
surd Four or FIVE wives to one
man, when the fact each woman, in
these times ought to have FIVE las- I
bands, Ii would take about that {
nanaber IL support me decently. K
Wife what has become of the 7.
grapes I" 81 suppose, my dear, the
hens picked them off. was the bland
rculy. "iIens-hens Soma two