davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
PHUNNYGRAMS.

"A "Come Home Husband Club" has
been organized by the married ladies at
Hannibal, Missouri. 1t is about three fee
long, with big knot on one end.
The gentleman so often spoken of In
novels, who riveted people with his gaze,
has obtained employmentin boiler manu-
factory, with extra pay, on account of his
peculiar faculty.
"A DanburY family which is sustained
by charity, almost persisted from hume
on Friday night. The little girl who daily
makes the rounds in quest Of food, was
prevented from going out that morning,
by losing one of her earrings.
"A male telegraph operator in one
city, after repeated efforts, got an answer
from young lady operator in another
city. He then sent this message: Il have
been trying to catch you for the last half
hour" In moment the reply came trip
ping back to him over the wires from the
Geographic maiden: That's nothing:
there's young man here who has been
trying to do the same thing for the last
two years, and he hasn't caught me yet.
"A Danbury boy who reads the papers
went to his father with rope in his hand
and told that worthy that, if he did not
give him fifty cents to buy two bladed
jacknife, he would forthwith hang him
self. 1t was the place of the old man to
say: Heaven forgive you, my son, for
the awful thought here's the fifty cents. !"
He didn't say it, however. He merely
twined his fingers in the young mans
tresses, and bumped his head against the
door jam until the suicide thought it was
4th of July night.
Imagine an old negro slumbering,
with his feet pointing to glimmering
fire.. Opens one eye and gets a glimpse
of them as they stand in the obscurity.
Mistakes them for two little negroes, and
cries: "Gif fun fore metz and relapses
into sleep. After while opens the other
eye, and still seeing the intruders, saws:
elf fun fore me, l say! I kick you in
de fire if you don't-I will shuahp' and
again he shores. His dreams not being
pleasant he soon opens his eyes, and still
seeing the little pests, he draws up his
foot for the threatened kick, but is
alarmed to see the enemy advance upon
him and exclaims: "Wha-war YOU comm,
to-, now? Humph, my own foot, by
iolly"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

the Local Option law of the State, giving the
people of certain wards the right to decide
by vote whether or not license to sell
liquor shall be granted therein.
The Democratic nominations in Rhode
Island are: For Governor, Charles R. Cutter;
Lieutenant Governor, Samuel III. Wales
Secretary of State, VIM. J. Miller; Attorney
General, George w. Bliss; Treasurer, W. P.
Congden.
The Wisconsin Senate sustained the Gov
ernor's veto of the La Crosse Bridge bill,
giving the Milwaukee & st. Paul Railroad
Comp any the right to bridge the Mississippi
River at La Crosse on a different location
from that fixed by the United States engi
| neers. The final defeat of the bill was the
occasion of great public rejoicing in La
Crosse.
The Massachusetts, House of Representa-
tives refused, on the 19th by vote of 40 to
1877, to rescind the resolution censuring Mr..
Sumner passed by the last Legislature.
Local option elections were held through
out Pennsylvania on the 21st. By these
elections each ward or township in the State
settles for itself whether it will license
liquor-seliing. The larger towns, like Pitts
burgh, and the mining and manufacturing
districts, are shown by the returns to have
given heavy majorities for licensing; the
country districts vote the other way.
The Wisconsin Legislature adjourned sine
die on the Goth.
According to the complete returns of the
New Hampshire election, Straw's majority
is 272 the vote being-Straw, 34,OlO; Wes-
ton, 1881; Blackner, 1909; Mason, COS.
The Republicans have of the Council
men, of the IL Senators. and majority OF
about So in the House. Two Of the three
Congressman are Republicans.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
FACTS AND FIGURES.

New Hampshire's manufacturing
products for 1872 were worth $7l, OoO,o oo'
The total number of sufferers by the
great Boston fire who have applied 1or
relief is 5000.
In Gevena accurate registers have
been kept of the yearly average OF lie
since 1860, which was then twenty-five
years six months; in 1888 it was forty
years and five months. Thus, IN less
than 800 years, the average duration OF
life has nearly doubled.
Pref. Levi, of London, in a paper
which he has published on British taxa
ton makes the estimate that of the ninety
million pounds sterling of taxation, inn
perial and local, paid by the whole peo-
pie, the working classes pay one-third
and the middle and higher classes two
thirds. The average taxation of the
working classes is set at 2Ss. Cd. per head
and out of every pound sterling of taxa
ton borne by the working classes it is
estimated that Is. sd. is paid on spirits,
3s. on beer, and IS. on tobacco, leaving
only thirty-four per cent. OF the whole to
be derived from the actual necessa-ies OF
life.
London is q world of itself, and it
would require more than lifetime to
know it. There are more than 3, 600, O0O
human beings crowded into an area OF
about 1872 square miles. There are about
5000 public houses, wine cellars and beer
saloons, where alcoholic liquors are sold,
and these places dispense 43, 200, 900 gal.
Ions of ale, 1850, 900 gallons of wine, and
100000 gallons of other strong drinks
| every year. AS result they have 1919,
0OO paupers, and it requires 5000 lawyers,
2 900 ministers, 5000 doctors, and 500 un-
dertakers to take care of the criminals,
sinners and sick people.
The following statement of the aver
age yield of tobacco per acre for 1872, in
the States named, with the price Of leaf to-
bacco on December 1, is interesting and
suggestive:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

The Bosen Zeitung, of Berlin, recently
published an interesting article on the
relative war strength of the European
powers. From the statistics furnished in
the article it appears that Russia is the
strongest military power in Europe, hav-
ing 22S regiments of infantry, with 684
battalions, 228 rifle battalions, $50 reserve
battalions, II regiments of the Guards, 30
regiments Of Cossacks, and 30S batteries
of eight guns each. Germany comes next,
having 14S regiments of the Guard and
infantry of the line, "a rifle battalions,
302 battalions of the Landwehr, 1870 cav
airy regiments, and 3S2 batteries of six
guns each. The French army, under the
new organization, will consist of 14S in
fantrv regiments, 80 rifle battalions, 2SS
reserve battalions, "a cavalry regiments,
and $50 batteries of six guns each. Aus
tria has but so infantry regiments, 10 rifle
battalions, Al cavalry regiments, and 176
batteries of six guns each, and Italy about
the same. The weakest of the leading
European powers, in military point OF
view, is England, which has only 107 bat
talions, 90 squadrons, and "a batteries of
six and eight guns each, and this number,
the Secretary of War, in his army esti-
mates recently presented to Parliament,
proposes to reduce quite materially.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
POLITICAL.

The Rhode Island State Prohibitory Con-
vention on the 18th nominated Henry
Howard for Governor; Latimer W. Ballou,
Lieutenant-Governor; Willard Sayles, At
torney-General; j. NJ. Alderman, Secretary
of State; and Henry Golf, General Treasurer.
This ticket is the same as nominated by the
Republican Convention, with the exception
of the candidates for Lieutenant Governor
and Treasurer.
The Legislature of Wisconsin has passed
a resolution commencing their members of
Congress who voted against the bill in
creasing salaries.
The Supreme Court of Pennsylvania has
decided in favor of the constitutionality of
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
A Two Minutes Sermon to Young
Ladies.

Ladies--caged birds of beautiful plum
age, but sickly looks-pale pets of the
parlor, who vegetate in unhealthy atmos-
phere, like the potato terminating in a
dark cellar-why do you not go into the
open air and warm sunshine, and add
luster to your eyes, bloom to your cheeks,
elasticity to your steps, and vigor to your
frames? Take exercise; run up the hill
On wager, and down again for fun;
roam the fields, climb the fences, leap the
bitches, wade the brooks, and, after day
of exhilarating exercise and unrestrained
liberty, go home with an appetite &C.
CURED by healthy enjo, ment The beau
tlful and blooming young lady-rosy-
checked and bright eyed-who can darn
a stocking, mend her own frock, COM
mand regiment of pots and kettles, and
be lady when required, is girl that
young men are in quest of for a wife
But you pining, wasp wasted, doll
dressed, consumption mortgaged, music
numbering, novel devouring daughters of
fashion and idleness, you are ne more fit
Tor matrlmony than pullet is to look
after brood of fourteen chickens. The
truth is, my dear girls, you want less fash
lonable restraint and more liberty of ac-
ton; more kitchen and less parlor; more
!eg exercise and less sofa; more pudding
ana less piano; more frankness and less
mock modesty. Loosen your waist-strings,
and breathe pure atmosphere, and become
something as good and beautiful as ma
ture designed.-San Francisco Neacs Letter.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
.h;, +;r,a hecausc the con

secret until this time, because the con col,
dnctor who allowed him to pass from Dai.
timore to Philadelphia would nave peeh
responsible to his master for the pecania.
nv loss sustained, and because ne olo no.
want to expose his friend Stanley, anu
because he did not want slavehoiaels W
know that slaves had any methods OF es-
cane. His freedom, he said, was honor
abiy purchased by British gold, 500 nav
ing been paid for him by 1rieno Oh us
in England, and the negotiations h Mra
been conducted by the Hon. WIN. Mele,
dith, of this city, who is at presen. t eas
presiding officer of the convention lof
the Revision of the State Constltutloh'
which is now in session.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

IRONING SHIRT FRONTs.-In a first
class laundry starch is made in the usual
manner; to a pail Of starch a whole
sperm candle is used. When the linen is
dry, it is dipped in the cold starch and
ironed in the ordinary way; then it is
dampened with wet cloth, and the pol.
ishing iron pressed over it. This is an
ordinary smoothing-iron, ground off 90
that the edges are all rounding. To this
last manipulation the linen is indebted for
the peculiar laundry gloss which all adj.
mire SO much, but which many house
keepers have vainly striven to leave upor
the wristbands and bosoms of their hus-
bands shirts.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

CoNsUMP TIoN.-For the cure of this dis
tressing disease there has been no medicine
yet discovered that can show more evidence
OF real merit than Aliens Lung Balsam. This
unequaled expectorant for curing consump-
ton, and all diseases leading to it. sucb as
affections of the throat, lungs, and all dis
eases OF the pulmonary organs, is introduced
TO the suffering public after its merits for the
cure OF such diseases have been fully teated
Dy the medical faculty. The Balsam is, CON
sequently, recommended by physicians who
cess.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

A PRUDENT business man will be as
careful to insure his life as his goods.
insurance is absolute protection when
secured in good companies. Before
closing any contract to insure your life
examine the plans and look into the
Pract1cal workings of the old New York
Lie insurance Company. If there is an
agent OF the company in your vicinity, in
Vlts MIN TO your place of business
anu ne Will give you some interesting
49, ana, II not, send to the home
for statement of the vast business done
assets, and dividends paid.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

WE nave seen it stated in various papers
sale of Sheridam's Cavalry Condition P6,cders
were authorized to refund the money to any
person who should use them and not be
satished with the result. We DOUBTED this
at hrst, but the proprietors authorize us to
say that it is true. N0 "
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
DOMESTIC.

Gold closed In New York on the 21st at
1151a9ll55s..
The principal business portion of Elyria
Ohio, was destroyed by fire on the night OF
the 18th. Loss estimated at $500, 900
An old man named John Zeimetz and his
grandson, Matthew Zeimetz, were burned
to death in the town of Worth, near Chica
go, few nights ago. They were in tnei1
dwelling house which took fire from some
unknown cause, and was rapidly consumed
giving the inmates no chance to escape.
The Falls City louisville, Ky.,) Tobacco
Bank robbery foots up about $3.50, 900 in
bonds. The bank offers reward of $50, GOO
for the return of the bonds, or TWENTY-FIVE
per cent. of the amount returned, and no
questions asked; also offers reward of $500
each for the capture of the burglars.
The railroad landgrant contest in the Wis.
consin Legislature has resulted in the grant
being voted to the Milwaukee & St. Paul
Railroad Company, instead of the Chicago &
Northwestern.
A fire in Lawrenceburg, KY, on the night
of the 18th, destroyed forty-seven buildings,
including two hotels, one bank, and all the
business houses except tin shop. Total
loss estimated at $4,000, but small por-
ton of which was covered by insurance.
disastrous fire occurred at Ogdensburg,
N. T., on the 10th, the damage Icing esti-
mated at $3.50, 600.
William d. Clutey, a prominent business
man OF Pittsburgh, Pa, has recently alb
seconded, leaving liabilities to the amount of
about S15o,C0o, Of which it has been ascer.
tanned that some $4,000 or 1000 was pro-
cured by forged paper.
Bonds to the value of s16s, 900 of the Penn
sylvania& Western Railway Company were
stolen from the Company's Office, in Broad
street, New York, on the 18th.
The joint Congressional resolution, con-
graduating Spain on having adopted Re-
publican form Of government, has been
forwarded by Secretary Fish to Minister
Sickles. The resolution was also signed by
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

:, hhoAI AFFECTIONS AND HoARsENEss -
All suffering from Irritation of the Throat
anu hoarseness will be agreeably surprised
AZ tne almost Immediate relief afforded by
the use of "Broacn's Bronchial Trocbfs,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

A HEART, not Gin the right place." was
found belonging to a man who recently
died IN the hospital at Cincinnati. 1t had
been beating away for years, comfortably
enough on the right side, when
by all rights it should have been On the
left; but from the slight arrangement, it
suffered little if any arrangement.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
A NEW DEp.pr.

TIN "A NEW ,DEpARrpR,
as wen as in po 5I1i'e''a
most successful s Of fff tbesa'
ment Of DR., JOSEPH, IVES, T,ii i
to produce a Veeeestaal5y,lA =
alive, without any ' sln'i q .
is curing disorders T Of 4,
bowels .,, nerves and d T.. De
t WIN as a Iaapidity that f5Si, e.'
sicians, and the praise oIa
the Newt His CALIFsSe6s,a
TIERS may be safely r pfs
popular remedy Of l flpu !
considered that this p NJ |,
was introduced some ~ ~, 7"
| present sale, which ~ "
3, 600, 900 bottles Der s,s Il
ascribed to its intrins G,4
lleVed that the historTy
cines" affords no exam
rapid and complete, y !,
sists that this success
served, and we have
dispute its dictum Y,
People, if not exaclIvtb h.,
is generally the voice q
and as they have had >,
a sober second thougb,
may be assumed that
their opinion is credit
city.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

The SCIENCE OF He.
opens with Popular PhysioIo-
ical Systems; The Scientific E
Natural Food Of Infants anu c
Causes and Cure; Heal,h r.. Z
Consult your Thermometer;
General Debility; Health Of
of Long Life; What Rattles1.
In Talks with Correspondent:
Liver; Deafness; Fever; BIZ.
Loss of Hair; Effects of Shsr
number, 20 cents, or s. for ::
WELLS, Publisher, 399 BtoaiV
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

tot Lace INSTANT RELIEF has stood twenty years
IS warranted to give Immediate relief to all
~ Neuraigic Head Ear, and Back Aches,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

CRIsTADoRo's ExCE1s1op u w., .
vnrau and alone; its merits have been so uni
netsaliy acknowledged that il would he n sunerero-
R aion to descant on them any furtherN.othing can
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

Joltnson's Amodyae Li,,-
doubt, the safest, surest p.
that has ever been iDverf.
extern al use. It is appIis.
variety of complaints, snf
cia1 for man or beast
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

Our BOYS -"Three; Q. !
and Hatred" by Jack C. Gri5e.l !,
derson's Choice" by VIII. Il. De-
Of two serial stories begun inihel,,
orr Boys. the former being s%,
striking Illustration. There ara
stories, editorials, poems, ske;.-.
inal and entertaining. A comic :.
on last page. Subscription prize!
stamp for specimen giving prer-l-
Orr Boys, Chicago.
LUNG COMPLAINTS, BR0NcRr- /
are speedily relieved, and i 81
manently cured by DR.. JAY !
You will find it also certain Hs-
and Colds. !,
BEST AND OLDEST FAMILY NJ
Licer InUigOrQtOr-a purely Veg. 3
I0ntc-for Dyspepsia, C0nsng-- ,
Headache. Bilious Attacks, ana J. '
Liver, Stomach and Bowels. ASS
it. Be1cGre Of iHaitdti0aS. !
THE late Gov. Geary prououDcr.s
er's Fever and Ague Ant!dote ..-
A single trial will establish is IL
ASK your grocer for Prussi1c
Vinegar. Warranted pure. Yir.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
The Atmospbers

With every change Of seaso, ., Dol
the hygienic character Of the 81. shal
impregnated, especially in 10. /
with mephitic vapors, which ger.,. else
rheumatism, indigestion, Billions. AtiVs
the organs Of respiration. Itis,,.. anu
necessary at this time Of the ga.
regulate the system so as to s,.,
morbid influences to which +, i.r,,1ose
ed. The stomach should be ,e,.5 10
from distractions, the blood gsr.. 6 ed
braced and strengthened. T5,..
Hostelter's Stomach Bitters ara nee
BILE; and in the whole range Of "a, ow
ives prescribed by tie facr,y d t
through the press, ther e Is not O.. wee
such an eminent degree greet g. to
harnlessness. 1t is positive -.
Whoever takes it habitually MI, II L,
phere of the worst fever AMI - 90
danger. Damp and chilling wind, M
impression on the organtzatloa -, :
powerful vegetable invtgoran. e.
is a good safeguard aga!ns, a..
and other pulmonary complain ~ n
mended as a remedy for this ls-s { II
but simply as a means Of strs.r tive
against the aerial conditions a. rdly
often produce them. As a s3r!-P ~ -
sors ,on,,,,a, - -. .-.r sust
pheric inhuences } MI
-he !
PHYSIOLOGICAL JOUayr.. bl;
of coatents of the April numb. With
to attract all classes Of reade., W
tioralism'' seems to claim z9. I'd Y
following subjects are OF spec- II Il
P. Kinball, of Portland, Nai1s nto
an essay on the elements Of hzZzly a
Educating the Sexes Tocs.hs ! de.
Problem; From No Whence ,oy rt b
Future Considered; Alime11r:- blu.
Abuse, illustrated; Wilder o- YEN
Worth to Me, a Frank Aimt. No,
President Of Mexico; The C.r- ind
Tendencies; The Cheerful Faa: "a e;
ID; The Maple Tree; Origin an .
East Tennessee and It's Rs.oE@r =
$500 year. Single Iumts:: rio
WELLS, n. Y.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
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Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27
THE MARkE

ASK your grocer for Prussi1s :
Vinegar. Warranted pure. re
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1873-03-27

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New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1873-07-12
UNIFICATION ASSOCIATION.

The covert sneers and open abuse di-
rected against the more prominent movers
in this scheme of political pacifcation has
stimulated rather than damaged them.
The numerous and significant signatures
show conclusively that the people who
have appended their names to the resolu-
tions desire no longer to permit hos
tility to the most peaceable population in
the world, to depopulate their fields of la
borers aud leave their domestic labors to
be performed by members Of their own
families. No one can compute the loss to
Louisiana from the riot and massacre of
1866 to that of 1873 with the terrorism
which has overspread the labor of the land
from that cause alone. Was it humane
return for the forbearnnce of the colored
people during the absence of the
white men of Louisiana in the war? Was
it wise policy with land subject to over
flow, and idle for want CT labor? Could
it be justified to commerce, when the
whole transfer of commodities here was
effected by coloIed draymen, and much
of its transportation conducted by colored
steamboat hands |? - = 81.
The intense hatred Of race cultivated
by intolerant leaders has produced all the
evils to which we have adverted, and it
has out off from the confidence of the
New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1873-07-12
INDUSTRIAL UNITICATION.
The unity association saws

We shall also recommend that the pro
| prietors Of all foundries. "a ctories and other
industrial esta blishments, in employing
mechanics or wOrkmen, make no distinction
| between the two races.
It is not probable the gentlemen who
| adopted this resolution appreciate its full
i'm portance. Let us connect it with this
other:
We shall further recommend that here
after no distinction shall exist among citi-
zens of Louisiana in any OF our public
schools or State institution of education.
The South has long attempted to estab-
lish the mechanic arts. It pays tribute
of some hundred millions annually for
failure to institute the mechanical in
dustries. Why is this? Some say. be-
cause young men consider the mechanic
arts disparaging, and prefer to be counter
hoppers Or bank-runners. Now. the col
ored people do not consider the mechanic
arts as dishonoring. On the contrary,
they are proud Of their industrial skill.
and are very apt in acquiring trades.
With the second proposition quoted the
colored people may be admitted to all the
benefits of trade schools. Let there be
an institution at which the arts and trades
are taught, with special schools, where
boy or girl may learn shoemaking. the
use Of the lathe in working iron, print
ing telegraphy, and other work, and it will
be very soon seen that the South has race
very capable Of spinning and weaving its
cotton, and supplying many millions of
mechanical fabrics which its own citizens
will not now make and which it has an
nually to import from abroad. The uni
tication of the industries is a measure
fraught with important results. The gen
tlemen who began by shaking hands with
people Of color different from their
own may, by cultivating this acquaint-
ance. develop qualities Of the highest
value to the country.