davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

A BOYS OPINION or \ CAT --Ol all
the hair iasects the eat is the anlnalsst
A good cat is hard TO die. II has two
ewes. a tail. Que head on its bow cad. and
lsr on each eutside corner OF rs body.
is body has four Sorners, two ot which
are behind 4 cat has kittens that IS, II
it il a kitten cat A /. eat has no KIT
tens TO news They eat ball. of yarn
and play with mice. but are notso sweet
a. roses, that is fresh ones. Some folks
like ca.s, but huekebsrry dumplngs are
better. Father wears stove-pipe hat on
Sunday, and Aunt Polly had twins last
summer 4 black cat don't chew so
much tobacco a, q member Of Congress,
but spits more when he is mad Syrup
of souills will make cat hum, but tar
pentne is better for the hair. Mother
cut her thumb on 4 flat-iron and Laid IT
on the cat-then father whallopcd h,r
ran behind the hen-eoep and squatted'
The new minister came over to our house
Yesterday, and sat down with his new
trowsers in = chair full of yoang cats.
He spoiled 'em bad If | had rcd pig
to play with Id lend you my ,uadsy
school book A cat has lap IN her
mouth. Mothers lap ain't. DID you
ever see eat hold box Of pills on the
end of her tail A sewing machine runs,
hut not so easy as a cat. That is all
know of her.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EE A Danbury hoy who reads the
papers wentto his father with rope IN
his hand and told that worthy that II he
did not give him fifty cents to buy two
blsded jack knife, he would forthwith
hang himself 1t was the place Of the
old man to say: Heaven forgive YOU,
my son, for the awful thong .
the fifty cents He didG't say il, how
ever. He merely twinel his fingers IN
the young mans tresses and bumped his
head against the doorjam until the sui
eide thought it was 4th Of July night.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
r.yA man whom DR.. Chalmers en-.

IS- a man whom DR., Chalmers en-
gagged to manage disorderly Sunday
school kept Ais eyes wide open during
praying, and when one pov thrust a pin
iato another, he marched u tho aisle,
still praying, aud culled the boys ears,
and went back again, praying all the way.
After that he was master of the situation
fer the boys thought that a man who
could watch and pray like that could not
be put down
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
ky- Miss Kitty -, daughter Of Dr.

Eg- Miss Kitty ----, daughter Of DR..
-, loves her father, anl takes an IN
terest in his profession Tho other day
a lady friend called to see her, and asked
how she was, and how she was getting
along. Oh, pretty well. V answered
Kitty, "pretty we'll; plenty of colds,
some bronchitis, and lttle typhus fever
but. as father said yesterday, to make
things lively, what we want is nice lit
tie epidemic.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EJ A young lady teacher at one Of
our mission Sunday. schools recently mar
rated the crucidAion to her class OF little
boys, and when she thought she had fair
ly engaged their minds was surprised
with " Bet YOU they wholdn't a done it if
Buffalo Bll'd been therp."
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

Eg- A newly married couple found
themselves in railway carriage with on
" one fellow passenger, who appeared to
sleep profoundly Soon the lady com
menecd to call her lover all the endcarlng
names that natural history can supply
The traveller reused up. begged the lady
to call her partner Noah's Ark at
once, and allow him to sleep quietly
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

Ey" Mamma" said a little three
year old. whose nose had been put out
ofjoint by the recent arrival of a baby
brother, mamma, if the baby Should
die, would it go to heaven ?" Certain
ly, my child, " replied the parent, Then
l think heaven is the best place for him, y
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

In word, as a great newspaper, the Appeal will
have No superior in the Southwest. The Daily will
be the history Of the world for one day and the Week
y VIII contain everything that will interest the coun.
try readers. Believing the advancement Of our com.
mon industrial, commcrgiBl and agricultural pros.
peity, TO be the chief end OF genuine journalism the
Appeal viii make these paramount objects.
Every county and town Of prominence should have
good papers, The Appeal does not propose or desire
to supplant interfere with the weekly country pa
pers. On the contrary it will club with them on the
most beral terms, and cooperate with them for
mutual protection, and In all plans for advancing
the newspaper fraternity the prosperity of the coun
try, and the welfare of the people.
Ia politics the Appeal will remain Democratic or
Conservative, and, ia elections involving political
issues II will support the candidates who favor its
views, tram an abiding faith IN the power Of orYsn
7et0u to accomplish good results and belief that
the party's will when honestly expressed and crys-
talzed IN nomination, is the best expression Of It's
effective power,
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
nzrnHnnnr mnn dn rnn nvnr drink 2

Ey-" Young man, do YOU ever drink ;
asked mild looking man, accosting
Jones "Well, yes, thank YOU, as it's n
cold morning don't mind, v replied
Jones, removing his quid Of tobacco.
Don't do it any moro, rcjoined the
mild man, "or you viii eventually be
damned Good morning, God bless
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EE A Hsverhill clergyman married q
couple the other day. The groom was .
tall stripping whose weight was ninety.
seven pounds, while that of the huxom
bride was two hundred and ten They
both declared that they had loved through
thick and thin. When the minister look
Cd at :he scrip he received for the job he
thought it was pretty thin.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
nr Atamse,ing of parish q

Ey At meeting of parish officials a
straight faced and most exemplary dea
con submitted report in writing of the
destitute widows and others who stood
in nesi of assistance, from the parish,
"Are you sure, deacon, that you have
embraced all the widows2' Ha said lie
believed he had
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

ET An old bachelor said there's q
darned sight more jewelry worn now =.
days than when | was young But there
is one piece that | always admired which
] don't often see now y
What is thstl' asked Young lady.
"a tumble, was the reply.
He was regarded with contempt and
scorn by every lady in the room for the
rest Of the evening.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EB That nervous youth in Louisville,
who recently by mistake, slipped a nickel
five cent piece into the parsons hand, in
stead Of five dollar gold piece, which he
had ready in another pocket, after three
weeks Of welded bliss, thinks he paid
pretty dearly for his fun after all, and re-
grets tha, the nickel was not suspender
button
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
i.aAget of SCiSsoriRgs.

rg The poetaster of the Memphis Avalanche thus
expresses his disgust at the prevailing weather m
tast lovely village;
Dirty days have September.
April, June sud Nofcmber;
From January up TO Nay,
The rain it rainvth every day,
An the rest have thirty y-oue,
Without a blessed CLEAN Of sun,
And IL any Of them bad o-and -tairtN,
They 4 be just as wet AMI twice as dirty
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

TT The average Massachusetts girl
don't want any better facilities for slid.
Ing down hill than Goldfish with string
through the gills
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

ET A witty little housewife Of our &C
quaintancc SAYS thare is no vcnson in the
market, but plenty Of dJar moat.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

ET Marriage is often said to be n lot.
terry. but Cclebs declares his belief that it
is a game Of crib basa.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

~ A poetic Hiberniaa cxplaas that
love is commonly spoken ofas a flame"
because il is tinder sentiment.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EN An old wine bibber SAYS that an
empty Champagne bottle is like an or
phan, because it has lost its pop
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

EE The Magic Mirror A beautiful
face liz up with smiles.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

x tn con Per Day Agents Wanted All
81 p" N~t classes of working people of either
sex, young or od make more money at work for us
in their spare moments, all the time, than at any
thing else. Particulars free. Address q. Stinson X
Co., Portland, Maine. jan2l, ,73-yl.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
FIRST CLASS NEW SPAPER,
A Representative
Journal of this Section.
THE CHEAPEST PAPER IN THE SOUTH

Special TeleGraphic Dispatches.
The Associated Press Dispatches.
Foreign and Domestic Intelligence.
Full Market Reports.
The Progress OF Railroads.
Information for Merchant and Producer.
Every Kind Of Political Intelligence,
Discoveries in Science and Art.
Original Poetry aud Stories.
Agricultural and Farm Intelligence,
The following by Telegraph Every Day;
Proceedings of Congress.
Proceedings Tennessee Legislature,
Proceedings Arkansas Legislature,
Proceedings Mississippi Legislature,
News Embracing Everything of Interest
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
TERMS rOR 1878.

rs' Address, Memphis Appeal Publishin- Co..
ppcal Building. 1, Union Street Memphis, Tenn
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

PURELY VEGETABLE.
For FORTY YEARS i, has proved It's great
vialue ia all diseases Of the Liver, Bowels and
Kidneys Thousands Of the good and great in all
parts Of the country youch for IT'S wonderful and
peculiar power in purifying the Blood, stimulating
the torulA Liver aud Bowels, and mrartug new
Life and Vigor 10 the whole system. SIMMONS.
LIVER REGULATOR is acknowledged to have,
ho equal asa -
LIVER MEDICINE,
1t contains four medical elements. never united
in the same happy proportion IN any Other prepa-
ration viz: gentle CathartIc, n wonderful Tome,
An hn"xcoptonahle Alternative aud certa'n Cor
rectiye Of all impurities of the body. Such sig
nal success has attended its use, that it IS now re
gardcd as the
GREAT UNFtILIN(. SPECIFIC
for Liver COMPLAINT and the painful oflaprinC
thereof. to.wit: DYSPEPSIA. CON NSTlPATION,
Jaundice Bilious attacks, SICK HEAhACHE,
Cuhc Depression Of Spirits, SOUR STOMACH,
Heart Burn, &c, &c.
Regulate the Liver and prevent
CHILLS AND FEVER.
Simmons Liver Regulator
Ia manufactured only 10y
j. II. ZEiLiN ~ CO.,
MACON, GA, and PHILADELPHIA
Price 81 90 per bottle; sent hy mail postage paid
81 25 Prepared ready foI use in bottles s 81,
SOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS.
s5y" Bewarn Of all Countorf,its and lmmia tions,
Oct - ly,
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
PURELY VEGETABLE.

This unriyaei Medicine " warranted not to
contain single particle of HuCUyb oc any inlu-
rous mineral substance, but ia
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
Shoemakcrs look out for YOUR Souls.

4 IL kinds Of Shoemakcrs Trimmings,
~ Lasts. boot Trees: Shoe Pegs. by the
huShcl shoe Thread. Avis. and a thousand
other things to tedious to mention.
by 6. AUSTIN.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
EUST RECEIVED.
- fine selected lot Of assorted
IRON :,

from the Globe Rolling Mills, CHM, bought
since the govt. manufacturing duty was re-
moved. which our customers and all hands can
have the benefit Of by calling early on
GEO. AUSTIN.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
IUST RECEIVED
- bbls Julius H. Smiths OLD reserve
WhiSLNcy,

warranted not to cut In the eye-not a head-
ache i'm hhdS. Of tit is no sooner in your
belly than its on your back in pound of beet
and it carries bead like a necklace; for
sale by
GEORGE AUSTIN.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11
AGENTS WANTED.

Any person, wishing to act permanently as local
agent, will receive full and prompt information by
applying to
Is SUTTON & CO.. Publishers,
81 Maiden Lane, New urk.
The Van Buren press., 1873-03-11

Whiskey.
~ hhls. and half bhls of good Whi'A'
HN ut Wholesale only, at
mar 100 NJ IL NJ"
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

GAMBETTA says the Republican
cause, in France never looked bright
err than at present. Having a Credit
Mobilier to begin, rather than to end
with, like this Republic, it may do
better than it did on two other trials
but the best thing the French can do,
is to tone down their republican ideas
into well-ordered constitutional mon
archy. Free government was never
established under such favorable au-
spices, as in this country, yet its rap
id degeneracy into corrupt oligarcy,
under the manipulation of a boosted
special puritan civilization, ought to
be a warning to all statesmen, in all
countries, who indulge the idea that
any race of men are capable of self
government.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08
The Nashville Custom House.

The following is the bill for the
erection of the Nashville Custom
House, as it passed and was signed by
the President:
AN ACT, to provide for the erection of a
public building nj Nashville, Tennessee.
BE it enacted by the Senate and
House of Representatives of the Uni
ted States of America, in Congress as
sembled. That the Secretary of the
Treasury be, and he hereby is, author
lied and directed to cause to be erect
ed. on the ground now owned by the
United States in that city, a suitable
building at Nashville, Tennessee, for
the use and accommodation of the
courts of-the United States, the post
Office, according to plans to be ap-
proved by the Secretary of the Treas
ury) custom house, and other Offices
of the Government, at cost not ex-
ceeding the sum of one hundred and
fifty thousand dollars.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08
Respectfully,
G. r. HARRIS, Mayor.

SENATOR BRowNLow expresses
himself like the old Parson" when
he writes to the Athens (Tenn.) Post
from Washington, January Is, about
reports of his resignation, as follows !:
" | consider that l am capable of do
ing my State as much service here as
anybody whom the present Legislature
would elect as my successor, and more
than one of the several small polite
ians and county court lawyers who as
pire to be Senator from Tennessee"
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08
COMMISSIONERS SALE OF VALUI.
KLE LAND.

James W. Smith ct ais. VS.. Catherine Hes
ter, ct ais.
In obedience to an order of the County
Court of Montgomery county, made at the
Aug. Term. 1872, will offer for sale 10 the
highest bidder, on the premises, on
Thursday, March 6, 1873.
a tract of land lying in District No, 4. of
Montgomery county, bounded by the lands
of y. Hester, Jr., Jas. Fletcher, James III.
Wall and Merritt d Gold, containing %
acres, more or less, 100 acres cleared and
the balance in timber. The same will be
sold as II whole, or divided into two or
more tracts 10 suit purchasers. A plat of
same will be exhibited on day of sale
The said land belongs to the estate OF Ma
than Hester, ST., decd, and is sold for divi-
sion among the heirs.
TERMs.-A credit OF II, IS and p months.
Notes with good security required, and
lien retained until all the purchase money
is paid.
PETER ONEAL. Cl'k 4 Com'r.
Feb. 8. '73-Iw. pr fee adv & bills, 50 50.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

1.-THE reports of the City Attorney
and Market Master will be published
as soon as handed in for that purpose.
To the Citizens and Tax payers of
GAINESVILLE:
As attention will be called to the Re-
ports of the city officers, have thought
it due to the late administration to
make explanations, which unexplain-
ed, might subject it to censure. In
the first place, from the Treasurers
Report, we see the very large sum of
s., 474 80, charged to expense ac-
count, salary of officers, watchmen,
&C." Out Of this amount. should be
deducted the sum of 81 OH %, ex-
penseS for the same purpose, incurred
by the previous administration, leav-
ing the actual expense at 81 ,403 81. /
may here mention we have had the
expense of, and out of this sum, has
been paid the salary $50 per monthly of
an extra policeman, who was ex-Officio
engineer Of the Steam Fire Engine,
also the expenditure of the sum of 1920
for the suppression and prevention of
smallpox. The exciting political con-
test of last year, made it necessary on a
number of occasions to put on a heavy
additional police force, at an expense
of about 500, all of which was paid
from this sum. So it will be seen the
actual amount spent in this way, these
unforeseen and unavoidable expenses
deducted, brings the amount down to
81, 4S3 81. To Street Repairs" is
charged S5,058 %. OF this amount,
the sum of 81 300 was paid on an ex-
ecutiOn in favor of c. Dineen, who, for
street Erepairs done in ISL, levied on
our Princeton Railroad bonds. The
sum of one thousand thousand dollars
was expended for digging, removing
the dirt, guttering and pipes for five
large fire-cisterns, all of which is
charged on Street Repairs
Under the head of Steam Fire En-
CINE" to which is charged the sum of
1904 90, [ will mention the purchase
of the Engine and Hook and Ladder
Trucks, freight on same, remoddling
of the entrance and front of the Engine
House, as well as the fuel, oils, &c.
$500 of the $1,000 over and above
the bonded debt, have been paid the
present year, as well as every dollar of
the interest on the bonded debt. and
the moneyis on hand to pay all liabili-
ties outstanding, bonded debt excep-
ted. This is more than can be said of
any other city in the South. As will
be seen from the City Marshal's and
City Attorney report, We have enough
due on taxes to pay the city expenses
for the next year. My thanks, land |
have no doubt all of our citizens will
join mel, are due and are hereby tend
cred Mr.. JAS l.. Glenn. of the North
ern Bank. for the material as sistance
he rendered the Board in disposing
of the city bonds, for the purchase Of
the Fire Engine and Hook and Lad
der Trucks
In conclusion | congratulate the cit
liens and taxpayers on the fact that
the scity is less embarrassed by debt,
than at any time for the past fifteen
years.
Respectfully,
G. r. HARRIS, Mayor.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08
TRIANGLE.
Cumberland Presbyterian Church.

We learn that the Cumberland
Presbyterian Church of this city. has
engaged the Pastoral services of Rev.
Stanford e. Burney, formerly of the
University of Mississippi
\ man eminent in his calling, and
well worthy the attention of our peo-
pie. Under the administration of such
a pastor, and one so well versed on the
Scriptures, this young and flourishing
Church will spring up like thing of
light, and shed It's radiance over the
whole cOmmunity-Jacksoa (Ttnn.)
Wing
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

THE Boston Board of Aldermen
have refused a lecturing license to
Woodruff and Claffin. A stimulation
of virtue is preferable to open profit
gacy, and since the Board, even to this
extent, pay homage to the genuine ar
ticle, there is a chance that it may
come to appreciate that which it ny
pocritically assumes.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

There is a man living at Waco,
Texas, says the Advance, who has
been married FIVE times, and is the
father of fifty legitimate children
thirteen boys by his first wife; eighteen
children, boys and girls, by his second
wife; teG by his third wife; six by his
fifth wife. ThirtE-fVe Of these child.
rem are living-pr were year ago;
eight were killed in the Confederate
army. and seven died natural deaths.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

THE Credit Mobilier has applied to
a Pennsylvania Judge for authority to
dissolve its organization, but the
Judge refused to grant it until the
Government claims against the con-
Germ, are adjusted. Nothing could
better please the villainous corpora
ton than to be allowed to dispense.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

The Circuit Judge had scarcely va
Gated his seat when the Criminal Judge
took it and is now in full chase after
criminals. Scarcely are jurors and
witnesses discharged from attendance
upon one Court, ere they are summon
ed to do duty under another. 1t is
a pretty picture of christian civiliza
ton, where it takes all the law-abid-
ing citizens in the county, to take part
in the detection and punishment Of
law breakers.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

WHILST the public debt is increas-
ing and legitimate business staggering
under all the weight it can carry, the
patriotic Administration is seeking to
have its salaries doubled. Ifsuch in
crease will keep their hands out of the
Treasury. We say let them have il.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08
JOHN MANNING
Is Always on E

JOHN MANNING has discovered that
the citizens of GAINESVILLE and surrounding
country needed n specific in the rarest
game of the season, served upin European
style on ten minutes notice, and as the
canvass for the Presidency has now fairly
opened. he keeps constantly on hand the
choicest Wines, Liquors, pure imported
Havana Cigars and Cincinnati Lager
Beer. TO nerve all candidates on to victory.
Restaurant and Saloon open night and
day, where the most fastidIous may be
more than pleased.
Feb lS=l-grn
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

gotten up for presentation to the leg
stature, praying the enactment ola |
liquor law, which shall embody the fol- |
lowing points:
l. Recognizing the rightof innocent |
sufferers, by the traffic, to indemnity
for injury to person or property.
2. That licensed dealers in intoxi-
eating liquors shall be held response
bic in adequate damages, for injuries to
the wives and children of those who
inhict them under the influence of
liquor sold, or given them by such
dealers.
3. That the right of action for such
damages shall be vested in the wives
and minors who are the suffers.
4. That all persons who may be in
jured by the acts of drunken men
ought to have a remedy against the
parties who furnish the liquor.
5. That persons licensed to tracffi in
liquors, be required to give bond to
cover such damages as may resultfr from
the traffic, and lien to be given upon the
property where liquor is sold, for the
damages,-the lien to commence with
the notice of the injury done.
The foregoing are very stringent
provisions, but are the more TO COM
mended On that account, and earnest
and effective effort for the suppression
of the evils of intemperance, is con-
templated by the people. Nor do We
find, upon cursory examination, of
the general principles upon which such
law must depend for its own enforce
ment, anything violative of vested
rights, or unsustained by well settled
precedent. Railroads are held response
BILE for the accidents incident to their
management, but however frequent
and terrible these may have been, they
are trifiing, in the eye of humanity, in
comparison with the wide spread in
juries infected by intemperance The
degration of character, the desolation
of homes, the suicide and murder and
the endless forms of other crimes and
wrongs everywhere and every day per-
petrated, make revolving catalogue
/ of horrors with which degraded pub
lie sentiment is daily RECALLED. The
evils which society, in all its ramifca-
tons, has to endure because of in
temperance, appeal earnestly fol
a prompt and efficient remedy. And
if the State will, for the sake of reve-
nue., continue to licence traffic so dis.
tructive of life and happiness, fortune
and character, peace and gooC
government, it is surely not unreason
able to ask that it throw around the
citizen such protection against its bale
full influences as may be afforded BY
the foregoing provisions embodied in ;
general law. We never expect to SCI
the evil entirely eradicated by legisla
tive enactments, because the govern
ment must become an intolerable ty
ranny before it can counterfeit ever,
ingenious agency for evading the Law
and its hired detectives, but the legis
lature can do much to mitigate it
malignity, by making the dealers i
licences, responsible for the injurie
resulting from the traffic which the,
voluntarily carry on with full knowl
edge of the responsibilities restirl
upon them.
Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1873-02-08

\ JOINT resolution endorsing the
Presidents Indian policy was defeated
on the 4th, by p to 20, in the Senate.
This looks as if some Senator's begin
to feel that they can afford to keep a
conscience