The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1872-05-30
4 RUSSIAN JESTER,

them, and II viii be found that, In every
nation, some ono parsonage, real or my
thieal, + selected as the lay-hgure upon
which all popular jests by common con-.
sent displayed. The English have their
brave Joe Miller, the Germans their
schiltburger and their Tyll Eulenspiegel,
the Americans their Col Crockett, the
Orientals their Nasireddinel khejah and
in the same way, the chosen godiathers
! OF Russian humor are Balakiretf the jestor
and Marshal Suyoron. The latter name
has long since passed into history; but
T the former requires some Introduction to
nou-R Russian readers. Popular traditions
unite in representing Balakireff as the
constant attendant Of Peter the Great,
who figures largely in all the stories at
/ tached to the name Of his butloon. Many
Of these stories are probably the fabrica-
ton of later age but fair proportion
Of them bear marks Of authenticity, and,
as fair specimens of natural humor, are
worth quoting.
On one occasion Balakireff begged
permission Of his imperial master TO at
tach himself to the guard stationed at the
palace; and Peter, for the sake Of the
joke, consented warning him at the
time that any officer Of the guard who
happened to lose bis sword, or to be alb
sent from his post Wien summoned, was
punished with death. The newly-made
officer promised to do his best; but the
temptation of some good wine sent to his
quarters that evening by the car, met him
and he partook 50 freely as to become
completely screwed While he was
sleeping of his debauch, Peter stole soft
~ into the room and carried off his sword.
BalakireG, missing it on awaking, and
frightened out of his wits at the probable
consequence, could devise no better rem
cdy than to replace the weapon with his
own professional sword Of lath, the hlt
and trappings of which were exactly sim
liar to those Of the guardsmen. Thus
equipped, lie appeared on parade the
next morning, confident in the assurance
of remaining undetected, if not forced to
draw his weapon. But Peter, who had
doubtless foreseen this contingency, in
: stantly began storming at one Of the men
for his untidy appearance, and at length
faced round upon Balakiref with tho
! stern order, Capt. Balakirefl, draw your
, sword and cut that sloven down.
The poor jester, thus brought fairly to
bay, laid his hand on his hilt as if to obey,
but at the same time exclaimed fervent-
ly, Merciful Heavenl let my swore be
turned into wood
And drawing the weapon, he exhibited
in very deed harmless lath. Even the
presence of the emperor was powerless tc
check the roar Of laughter which followed;
and Balakiref was allowed to escape.
The testers ingenuity occasionally served
him in extricating others from trouble as
r well as himself. A cousin Of his, having
g fallen under the displeasure of the czar
, was about to be executed; and Balakire1
: presented himself at court to petition fol
D a reprieve Peter, seeing him enter, anc
at once diviuing his errand, shouted u
b him. It's no use, your coming here;
{ swear that will not grant what you arr
y going to ask
d Quick as though, Balakireff dropped OF
e his knees and exclaimed, Peter Alexeie
d WITCH | beseech you to put that scamp o
a cousin of mine 10 dcathl Peter thu
e caught in his own trap, had no choice bu
e to laugh and send pardon to the offend
& er
During one of the czar's Liyonian cam
il paigns, thick fog greatly obstructed th
d moyemements Of the army. At length
e pale watery CLEAN began to show itsel
If through the mist, and two of the Russia
X officers fell to disputing whether thi
were the sun or not Balaklreff happen
f. ing to pass by at that moment, they ar
e. pealed to him to decide. Is that yonde
ie light the sun, brother?
How should | know? answered th
8 Jester; have never been here before
e. At the end Of the same campaign, sever
rs al of the officers were relating their ca
le plots, when BalakireG stepped in anon
8, them. I've got a story to tell too, erie
10 he boastfully; a better one than any
ID yours.
Let ms hear it, then, answered the of
d, GERS; and Balakiref began
~ never liked this way of fighting, a
IA crowd together, which they hay
H. nowadays; It seems to me more mani
~ for each 10 stand by himself; and Their
bo fore always went out alone. Now,
ro CHANGED that one day, while reeonnoite
ing close to the enemy's outposts, SUI
denly espled a Swedish soldier lying q
= the ground just IN front Of me. Thel
&, was not a moment to lose; he might sta
- up and give the alarm. drew my swoi
rushed upon him, and at one blow cut &
his right foot.
You iooll cried one OF the listener
w YOU should rather cut OF his head
j So would, answered Balakirea, wi
ed d grin, but somebody else had done III
already.
AZ times Balakired pushed bis wa
on gerles too FAR, and gave serious ofiens
he 10 bis formidable patron. On one Of tho
!, / occasions The enraged emperor summa
bic III bauished him from the court, biddil
I've him never appear on Russian soil agai
If fa. IL. a