davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
Girls-by a Boy.

Girls are the most unac countablest
things in the world-except women.
Like the wicked flea, when you have
them they aint there. can cipher clean
over to improper fractions, and the
teacher says | do it tirst-rate /; but l cant
cipher out a girl, proper or improper,
and you cant either. The only rule in
arithmetic that hits their case is the
double rule of two They are as full of
Old Nick as their skin can hold, and
they would die if they couldn't torment
somebody. When they try to be mean,
they are as mean as pusley, though they
Amt as mean as they let on, except some
times, and then they are good deal
meaner. The only way to get along
with girl when she comes at you with
her nonsense, is to give her tit for tat,
and that will ffummux her, and when
yon get a girl fummuxed she is as nice
as new pin. A girl can SOW more wild
oats in day than boy can Bow in
year, but girls get their wild oats sowed
after while, which boys never do, and
then they settle down as calm and placid
as a mud-puddle.
But l like girls frst-rate. and 1 guess
the boys all do. don't care how many
tricks they play on me-and they don't
care either. The hoite-toitiest girl in
the world can't always boil over like a
glass of soda. BY and by they will get
into the traces with somebody they like,
and pull as steady as any old stage
horse. That is the beauty of them. So
let them wave, say; they will pay for
IT some day, sewing on buttons and try
ing to make decent man of the feller
they have spliced on to, and ten chances
to one if they don't get the worst Of it.
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03

GREELEY's FIRST LESSONS IIN PIPE
LAYING. On the authority of resident
of Hartford, the Camdnt tells the fol-
lowing story as Incorporated in lecture
to the students at Union College by
Prof Gillespie some years ago: "Mr.
Greeley at one time invited the Professor
to visit his farm at Chappaqua, and told
him he was about TO build a fountain in
front of his house, the water for which
was to be supplied from spring upon a
hill opposite. Mr.. Greeley said his plan
was to build an aqueddct across the in
tervening valley, after the manner of the
ancient Romans. He could see no other
way to conduct the water to the foun-
tain. The Professor told him such an
aqueduct would cost 100000 or $780,
o00-about twenty times the cost of the
whole farm-but lead pipe could be
laid under ground, which would answer
every purpose, and cost 5000 or 5000.
He then explained the principle of the
syphon. which is familiar to every
school-boy, which so delighted him that
he acled like child who had Just re-
ceived new toy, and with a proiusion
of thanks to the Professor, gave direc-
tions to lay the pipe"
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03

An Idaho woman was orderd by
physician to take three ounces of brandy
a day, and knowing that sixteen drachms
make an ounce. has patiently been taking
torty-eight drinks day ever since.
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03

An exchange says: "Cotton seed Is
recommended as highly concentrated
fesh-produoing food" Ladies don't use
the seed, but the cotton ITSELF TO make
them plump.
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
The Hearth and Home says that Bish-

The Hearth and Home says that Bish-
op Whitehouse was, one Sabbath even
ing, describing to his congregation how
he had once been lost out on the prairies
of Illinois. and had wandered for long
time, weary and almost hopeless. Al
last he saw light, and made his way
slowly toward il, shouting for help.
"Just as thought l could go no far
ther," said the Bishop, "and was about
sinking down in despair, the door of a
cabin opened before me, and tie long
looked for Sucker came" The pun was
unintentional, but the effect on q West
ern audience was inevitable.
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03

The editress of Western journal
apologies for the detention of hei paper,
"becsuse of the arrival of an extra
male"
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
SELECT POETRY.
Anything to Beat Grant,


"Amythfng to beat Grant!" cry the sore
Yes, and so yelled the rebel horde when in
battle array
The hero confronted them. With Gods help
he must
Now, as then, make every enemy cen bite the
dust
"AnWhing to beat Grant" Can it be that the
Reproach Oft quoted, that Republics are un-
Applies to usg Are we, great heaven beref,
of reason?
Forgetting him whose prowess crushed the
monster treasony
"Anytling to beat Grant," Oh, keep our men,
ory ever green
Ne'er be ii said there lives a man with soul so
mean
Who recollccts not the valiant deeds, the clo-
rious strife
Performed by him who saved the nations eb
bing life?
"Anything to beat Grantr In Gods name tell
me why
These mscreants have raised so foul a battle
Tell me all ye who have flashed your maiden
swords,
And ye whose true aim laid low those South.
ern lords.
"Anything to beat Grant" Up! up once more
ye braves!
Who helped to crush out treason annihiate
these knaves!
Again your old commander calls on you to
move,
Twas once bounden duty--let it now be done
Tor lore.
"Anything to heat Grant," the loyal Tribune
sweelly sings.
And the loud symphony is taken up by Dem
ocratIc rings"
But in November next let's show them that
they can't
I'm the vernacular) beat one side of our brave
old General-.Grant.
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
HOUSE AND LOT FOR sALEi

] HE property of the subscriber, con.
sis,ius q 5li0o acres Of land Prospect St. House
well nnished. with good barn. good water. splendid
variety OF grapes cherries plums peaches rasp6erries
&C. Considering the quantity Of land few places equal
It, For sale low and time given u desired:
Ashtsbuia, February. isaa ssnf
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
Plantation Bitters.
S. T.---I860---X.

Il HIS wonderful vegetable restorative
is the sheetanchor of the feeble and debiated As
tonic and cordial for the aged and languid IL has
equal among somnchics. Asa remedy for the nervous
weakness to which women especially subject IL IL
supersedng every other stlmuant. In ali climates,
tropical temperate ftgid. 1t specific in
ry species Of disorder which undermihes the bodily
strength and breaks down the agimal spirits. 1l49
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
W ILLIAM HUMPHREY, havin.

mapped out over Three Hundred lots with six new
between the North Ridge road and the Depot Of
the L. s. r. r., proposes to sell them on
II DN YEARS TTNHm,
Together with Three Brick Dwellings several Wood
dwellings, Twenty-Five Lots North of the DepOf several
lots at the Harbor. One thousand Acres OF Land In
Pymoutk on email place in Monroe, and Eighty acres
In MinnesOia.
Also on hand 900 bushels Quick Lime 400 barrels
Of Cement. 90 barrels Plaster Paris, 10 Tons Lar
Kilt.
Aso $4,000 in Notes and Mortgages to exchange for
Cash. WIN HUMPHREY
Ashtabula, o., Feb.1, 1874 y-5s
Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1872-08-03
CABINET WARE.

JOHN DUCRO, Manufacturer OF and Dealer in
Furniture of the best descriptions, and every variety
Also General Undertaken. and Manufacturer OF Cofns
to order. Main street, North OF South Public Square,
Ashtnbula. 4g1
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Gum Arabic.

The useful little mucilage bottle,
which has come to be so indispensable
upon every editorial table, is filed with
gum arabic, an adhesive article, dissolved
in water, and combined oftentimes with
other ingredients, which are generally
mere authorizations. The most familiar
objects about US are often least under.
stood, and probably few pause to ask
the question, What is gum arabic, and
from whence does it come? In Morocco,
about the middle of November THAT is
after the rainy season., gummy Juice
exudes spontaneously from the trunks
aud branches of the acacia. 1t gradu-
ALLY thickens in the furrow down which
it runs. and assumes the form of oval
and round drops about the size of
pigeons eggs, OF different colors. as it
comes from the red or white gum tree.
About the middle of December the
Moors encamp on the borders of the
forest, and the harvest lasts full month.
The gum is packed in large leather
sacks, and transported on the backs of
camels and bulloeks to seaport for ship
ment. The harvest occasion is made
one OF great rejoicing, and the people
for the time being almost live on the
gum, which is nutritious and fattening.
Such is the commercial story of this
simple but very useful article, which is
next in convenience on an editors table
to the all potent and indispensable scis.
sors
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07

truth. At first Frank was half inclined
to be vexed.
- II didn't want an heiress," said he,
biting his lips.
"But you want me, don't YOUR said
Clara, with the prettiest coaxing way in
the world.
"Of course | dol" said Frank. "Bat
darling, | had such bright little
dream of love in cottager'
"And it shall come true" said Clara,
sin spite of the five hundred year,
The two young lovers travelled back
tetea-tete, to London, as soon as Moses
Peckham's sister could be induced to
come and take Clara's place in Aunt
Dalmayne's household. What Harvey
Glllette's feelings were when he learned
the true state of the case we leave the
imaginative reader to conjecture. for
the best tacticians may out. general
themselves at times.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Cotton Factories.

In glancing over the census returns,
as they relate to the manufacture of
cotton goods, it is pleasant to observe
that the Southern States are coming to-
ward the front with their factories. This
industry is comparatively a new ven
ture in that region, but it is one upon
which depends much of the prosperity
OF the people, and the only surprise is,
that is was not-years ago, when slave
labor was at hand to stimulate its
growth--adopted as means of securipg
independence against the high tariff
rates of which the South SO persistently
complained. The returns alluded to-
which are the most complete yet pub
lished-show that there are S99 distinct
manufacturing establishments, of which
Massachusetts has 19l Rhode Island,
1879; Pennsylvania, 1873 Connecticut,
Ill; New York, 81; New Hampshire,
36; Georgia, 81 North Carolina, SO !;
Tennessee, %; New Jersey, 81; Maine,
%; Maryland, %; Alabama, 10; South
Carolina, u; Virginia, IL. Of looms
there is total of 1880; of frame
spindles, 3.694,477; OF mule spindles,
l,437. 1888. In this list, seven of the
Southern States present an array of 153
mllis.-Ne0 York Shipping List.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
A Plea for Dogs,

A correspondent of the Maine Farmer
speaks these good words for the house
dog "What hard working farmer, on
retiring at night to rest his weary limbs,
does not feel that he is more safe from
burglars, and his stock, fowls and
orchards more secure from thieves and
midnight providers, both two and four
legged, if he has good, faithful dog
about the premises? What good house.
wife-and all such prefer leaving their
days work on the clothes line during
the dews of night-does not feel that
her clothes are more safe if Bose is in
the yard? When the little ones are off
Deriving, fishing, or wandering in the
woods, what parent does not feel less
anxious if Bose is with them? When
you are absent from them over night do
you not feel that home is more secure.
if Bose guards the premises-and who
greets your return with more cheerful
welcome than he? From the earliest
period of history the dog has been the
faithful companion of man, and is the
only species of the brute creation that
will forsake its own species and follow
man.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Jessie and I.


Jessie is a rich mans wife,
But poor mans /;
She dwells in stylish mansion,
Mine cot near by.
Jessie's clad in silks and velvets,
A plain linen L;
She can ever follow the fashion,
Net one car I.
Jessie has her friends by scores.
Three or four have I;
Riches gone her friends would leave her,
Mine would all be nigh.
Jessie rides in costly carriage,
No one can pass her by;
Her husband follows on his bay,
Trudge along do I.
Jessie has the rarest jewels,
Not that kind have l;
But my Jewel IS far the costlier,
lis my darling Lille by me nigh.
Jessie has no children near her,
One little girl have L;
She might have them round her now,
If she did but try.
Jessie once was very friendly,
When-as. poor as I:
Now she thinks I'm far beneath her,
She will pass me by.
Jessie will not be the richer
When she comes to die;
She will have six feet of green turf.
Just the same will I.
So when others try to scorn you,
Do not give up, but try
10 be honest. pure and good.
And you'll be equals in the sky.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Varieties.

AwATER-PITCHER-A fire engine.
THE first tubular bridge-The bridge
of the nose.
Why is mouse like load of hay
Because the cat IL eat it.
Why is dancing like new milk? Be-
cause 1t strengthens the calves.
Why is an old coat like an iron kettle2
Because it represents hard ware.
LADY ushers are the latest wrinkle for
fashionable weddings in New York.
WHISKY is said TO be horn Of plenty,
because it will corn you copiously.
Two female BARRIERS in Brussels show
woman's effort to razor self to indepen-
dence.
Do you enjoy good health, Zacha-
ry? "Why, yes, to be sure; who
deesn't?"
"PARTING is such sweet SORROW par.
ticularly with a cracked looking-glass
and toothless comb.
SOMEBODY says a wife should be like a
roasted lamb-tender, and nicely dress
ed. A scamp adds; And without any
sauce"
cit is very curious" said an old gentle.
man to his friend, that watch should
be kept perfectly dry when it has a
running spring inside"
A POOR young man remarks that the
only advice he gets from capitalists is
to :" live within his lnceme,n whereas
the difficulty he experiences is to live
without an income.
Or misery man who died Of soften
ing of the brain local paper said:
Ellis head gave away, but his hand
never did. His brain softened, but his
heart couldn't"
JOSH BILLINGS says: ~ will state
for the information Of those who haven't
had chance tew lay in insect wizdum
az freely as l have, that one single hor-
net, who feels well, will break up
whole camp-meeting."
A PLEAsANT-LooKING gentleman step
ped out on the platform, and inhaling
the fresh air, enthusiastically observed
to the brakeman, !. Isn't this invigor-
ating?" "No, sir; it IS Bethel" said
the con scientious employee. The pleas
antlooking gentleman retired.
A POEM for the courts:
A Judge did once his tipstaf call,
And say, "Sir, desire
You go forthwith and search the hall,
And bring me in the crier.''
"And search in vain, my lord, may"
The tipstaf gravely said,
The crier cannot cry to-day,
Because his wife is dead"
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Smile Whenever You Can.

When things don't go to suit you,
And the world seems upside down,
Don't waste your time in fretting,
But drive away the frown; IN.
Since life is oft perplexing,
IT'S much the wisest plan
To bear all tr. ais bravely.
And smile .whene'er you can.
Why should you dread tomorrow,
And thus despoil to-day?
And when you borrow trouble.
You always have to pay;
1t is a good old maxim,
Which should be often preached,
Don't cross the bridge before youi
Until the bridge be reached.
You might be spared much signing
If you would bear in mind,
The thought that good and evil
Are always here combined;
There must be something wanting,
And though you roll in wealth,
You may miss from your casket
That precious jegel-health.
And though you're strong and sturdy,
You may have an empty purse;
(4nd earth has many trials
Which [ consider worseD
But whether joy or sorrow
Fill up your mighty span.
Twill make your pathway brighter
10 smile whene'er you can.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
Stories of Peter Cartwright.

| A DISPUTE WITH DOCTOR.
Many other anecdotes could be told
of this eccentric and talented man, and
there is one too good to let pass. He
once had dispute with a doctor rela.
tive to religion. The doctor said he
wanted honest and unequivocal answers
to few questions
Did you ever hear religion y
"No."
Did you ever smell religion ?"
"No."
Did you ever taste religion ?"
"No.m
"Did you ever feel religion? ?"
"Yes.'
"Now, Them said the doctor, with
apparent triumph, :" have proved be-
yond doubt, by four respectable wit
nesses, that religion is not seen, heard,
smelled, or tasted, and but one solitary
witness, feeling, has testified that it is
an experimental fact. The weight of
evidence is overwhelming, and you
must give it up"
Cartwright asked, did you ever see
pain p
mo-
did you ever.hear pain ?"
NV.
/ odd you ever smell pain ?"
"No."
"Did you ever taste pain ~
"No.n
Did you ever feel a sain?"
Certainly L did, sir.'
The doctor and his family were con.
verted.
BLAZING HIS WAY.
Cartwright having been brought up
in log cabin, did not like climbing
stairs, and when he took up his quarters
in hotel he preferred rooms on lower
floor. He once went to Chicago, and
booked himself at the fremont House.
The preacher was assigned to room in
the eighth or ninth story.
Soon after being shown to his room
Cartwright rang the bell. A waiter was
promptly in attendance. 81 want an
AK" said Cartwright The astonished
servant said he would procure one.
Having obtained an ak, Cartwright
asked the waiter to guide him down
stairs. At the first turn in the stairs
Cartwright blazed his mark in the wal
nut baluster. The dumbfoundered
waiter asked him what ne meant. 81
want to know my way back to my room
again." said Cartwright. The preacher
was assigned to room at more reason
able distance from mother earth.
Mr.. Cartwright was first assigned to
Pleasant Plains, Sangamon county, ILL.,,
in 1853. In his old age he retained his
faculties to an extraordinary degree,
and his example has had no small effect
in keeping up his old-time spirit of
Methodism.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07
A YOUNG Cincinnati girl. who is ge,t;

A YOUNG Cincinnati girl, who is getting
" finished education at an Eastern
seminary, wrote to her parents that she
was invited out to dyeuner the day
before" and was going to q ete cham
pftre the next day." The principal of
the school was surprised to receive a
telegram from the Gold man day or
two after, saying, " If you can't Keep
my daughter away from those blasted
menageries and side shows, l will come
down and see what ails her"
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07

JANE Howard, of Dubuque, wants
81 900 because John Collins said she
would carry off stove if it wasn't too
hot and too heavy.
Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1872-11-07

BORED OF EDUcATIoN-The truant.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20

contestant, and having set forth in bis
petition what be- alleged to be facts IN
regard to certain frauds. the brunt Of the
battle necessarily rested with him de
has most signally failed in his attempt to
prove the allegations. At the hands OF
an honest committee he hae not the shad'
ow Of chance of obtaining the seat he SO
much covets. 1t remains to be seen yet
whether this committee will act honestly
or not. We hope they may. for they
will find the people as good judges of evil
dence as themselves, and understand this
case thoroughly.
The Bogus Diploma Committee held a
meeting in Philadelphia last Saturday,
and obtained some valuable testimony
against Docto- Paine. for selling diplo-
mas.
The Evans committee are busily en-
gagged in taking testimony. and will soon
be ready to make partial report.
@ JUNIATA.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20

THOSE who have been antagonistic to
Senator Cameron have extensively circu
lated the report that he has been all
earnest supporter of President Grant fol
rsnomination solely because he appoint
cd to office whom-oever the Senator re
commended. Latterly Mr. Cameron de-
livered speech in the United States
Senate on the Sumner resolution to in
vestigate the alleged sale of arms-and
we regret that our space is too limited to
publish tin which he speaks to that
point as follows; He 1.-THE President)
has never been my special friend. do
not think he has ever made three ap-
pointments at my request and have
asked him to make three hundred"
Will the gentlemen who have been
questioning Senator Cameron's motives
for supporting the President. have the
candor 10 credit the Senator with the
disavowal Of the charge.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20


The New YORK Sun Of last Friday
contained a long communication from
Harrisburg, charging that the fund that
Evans embezzeled was divided between
General Hartranft, Mr.. Mackey. Mr. w.
H. Graeff, Mr.. S. l. Moon. Mr.. j. N.
Mcclure, and Mr.. VIM. II. Kembell
Evans is a fugitive from investigation.
When summoned to appear before an
investigating committee, be plead illness
To accommodate him the investigating
committee went to Philadelphia. Evans
went to New York. and would not heed
the summons of the committee. The
charges in the Sun came from men who
are defending the guilt of Evans, and
evidently wish to turn attention from
their own guilty selves to others. Let
all be examined under oath. The hon.
or and credit of the State-to say moth
ing of the reputation of gentlemen
brought under suspicion by the calum-
nies of the swindlers themselves, or their
agents-demands this much.'
The gentlemen above named are all
eager for close and sitting investigation.
and some of them have not stopped at
the demand for an investigation. but have
instituted legal proceedings against the
iSs. for libel.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20
Victory in New Hampshire.

The Republican party has been victo-
rious in New Hampshire Straw, the Re
publican candidate for Governor, was elec
ted on the 18th, by a majority Of about
1900. The Senate stands s Republicans
and Democrats. The Republican ma
jprity in the House is between 20 and so.
A straw shows which way the wind
blows.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20
CORN IS KING!
Improved Chestr County Mammoth
Corn.

TINE above corn i more prolific. will yield
L more com than any otter in the Uni'si
States. The yield IL sti 12J bushels shell
ed corn per acre. and has been as high as
l3i bushels per acre. over field of ten acres
Price. *l-o0p per peck 81 % per half bush
Ell: s. so per bushei. For sale by the un-
dersigned
n. Any person purchasing Of the above
corn for seed. md NJ embarrassing con.id.
ers that he has not been we'll paid by the rur-
chase and change Of seel corn I will refund
10 him the money pail for the corn
SAMUEL LEONARD
Oakland Mile, Junia,a Co, Pa
lsrDD
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20
Dissolution of Partnership.

I'HE partnership heretofore existing be-
L tween G. W. Heck and A. B. Fasick in
the Shosmaking business. in the borough Of
Miftiintown, under the firm of Heck / Fs-
sick has this day March =, 1922 been dis
solved by mutua, consent. The books Of the
firm are in the hands of A. B. Fasick for
collection. G W. HECK,
March :, I'll A. L. FASlCk.
Juniata sentinel. [volume] (Mifflintown, Pa.) 1846-1873, 1872-03-20
Petition III the Orphans Court Of Ju-
niata County.

J,nimr j. LIk>ns rs EiiIia T.. IN isoa o5f
.EoTihI .Iaas N9,ko8 !is irjt.
And row. February 9TH. 1872, Rule grant
e.! on the above n,mel Defendants tlaI rr-y
be and appear before 'he Judges Of the Or
phans Cour, of Juniaia county, at a court 10
be h, III in " Mifiihiown, IN The Ind DAY OF
April 4. b. 1872. To show cs,use why the
prayer of the petitioner. Jemins J. Lukens,
shouh lot be gruntcl.
Notice Of 'his ru'e 10 lie given in two of
the new-pape's ; of JuniaiS County, and 10 Ia
inserted for four " .esI IN each.
BY Tie C.url.
ELI DUNN.
mario Clerk of the Orphnhs Cout.