Eaton weekly Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1866-1875, 1872-05-23
Editorial Brevities.

s. Unseen happiness-A kiss in tn
dark.
The best time to cut corn-when
aches.
Decoration day is next on the pro
gramme. .
We r daily adding new names t.
bur subscription list.
"A ST Paul paper calls sickness {
Hfds'-eye view of the grave.
"Smelling" business very dull fol
past week.
There is an unusual amount of "bus.
tle'' around the dressmakers' and mil.
linery shops at present.
Subscribe for the CAMPAIGN DEMO
Graf, the political news of 1872 will
be of great importance.
r. D. Hughes, of the American Elk
press Company has our thanks for late
Dayton daily papers.
Keep out of debt, out of quarrels,
out of damp clothes, out of liquor, and
out of doors in good weather.
House, flies are thawing out and
preparing to tickle the noses of noon
nappers.
A goose in Maine has produced an
egg a foot in circumference. Send
that egg mere and we will have an
other Treasurer Matched.
Who wants to purchase the coil
painting" "Committee on Resolu-
tons ?" 1t will be sold cheap. We
have no more use for it.
j. P. Brookins & Son are supplying
the thirsty with delicious, sparkling
Soda Water for a nickle a glass, and
furnish you a good cigar for a dime.
A young lady in passing another
should not turn around to see what
the other wears, because the other is
engaged in doing the same thing.
The last question that has troubled
philosophers is this Which causes a
girl most pleasure, to hear herself
praised OF another girl run down?
Our stores are all filled with nice
new goods. You al find out who
sells the cheapest by consulting our
advertising columns.
Decoration day will 500 be here,
when the nation will kneel with rev.
erence and gratitude at the graves of
its children.
The "calf" of the "Register" don't
know the difference between the arti-
Gle from which it imbibed the tactical
of its existence and a buckskin glove!
Rev. Bacchus Saunders, of the NJ.
E. Church, St. Louis, got his scalp
raised by II McCloud, for his famil-
iarity with Mrs. McCloud, a "lamb"
of his flock. So we go.
Dolly Warden sausages r half dog,
half cat, half beef and the rest hair
Boarding houses has 'em. Our ''smel-
ling committee" ought to be fed on
them to keep up their courage.
Fishing parties are being organized,
one digs the bats, another procures
tackle, while the third furnishes the
'pepper mint drops" so the smelling
committee" won't scent 'em!
The loafing business is locking up,
with a fair prospect of a large ex-
change of gossip and rude remarks on
the street nj as the weather be-
comes settled.
TWENTY THOUSAND is the sum
sucked from the public crib by the
affidavit maker and carpet
baggeri And yet he wanted to be
Deputy Marshal! Whew!
Miss Stevens, a beautiful blonde
preacher is creating a profound relig-
ious sensation in Georgia. She is
said to make all the masculines feel
like embracing her-doctrines.
"Shallow-pate's" witticisms in the
last 'Register" remind us of a fellow
who undertakes to shave with a dull
razor. He had better attend to the
business than undertake to
write wit. Too blunt.
Here is what some one says about
our girls. They eat too much horse
radish and too many pickles at lunch,
entaiHng sharp elbows, thin calves,
and red noses, and the smelling COM
are after them.
We hope nc one will enforce the
law against Thomas Jefferson Larsh
compelling him to lay a pavement.
That would be cruel. We like to see
good sidewalks, but don't want men
FORCE d TODD what is not convenient.
There is a strong probability that
the editor of the Eaton "Register"
will have to be taken to the insane
asylum. Since the appointment of
the smelling committee" and the
of Greeley his alterations
are distressing. at is sad"
Some dastardly creature attempted
to fire the large collection of lumber
at the Seat Factory, on Monday eve