The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1872-04-22
THE PRESS.
MONDAY MORNING, APRIL 90, 1872
Easily Amused.

ssTbere-Peter Magnus sounds well, L
think Sir. Curious about those initials. l
sometimes sign myself Afternoon and it
amuses my friends very much," said Mr..
Magnus. SIT is calculated to afford them the
highest qualification, should conceive" said
Mr.. Pickwick, rather envying the ease with
which Mr.. Magnus' friends were entertained.
1t is fortunate that Mr.. Peter Magnus is
not member of the national House of Rep
resentatives, for even the very thin, almost
invisible vein of humor which Mr.. Pickwick
was secretly inclined to depreciate, would keep
thai body in constant paroxysms OF real Ho-
meric laughter. And revelations lately made
as to the expense of printing the word "laugh-
ter, in the Globe show that Mr.. Magnus as
Representative, would soon not only stop
the decrease in the national debt, but would
speedily plunge the country into bankruptcy.
For, judged by the Washington standard, the
admirer of the lady in yellow curl-papers has
an inexhaustible store of genuine Attic salt.
What that standard is, anybody may see who
will take the trouble to read the press report
of the encounter between Gen. Butler and
Gen. Garfield on Friday. The latter having re-
marked that the House was not the Middlesex
bar, and also that it was not criminal Court
the former retorted: ''No Sir, because there is
some decorum and propriety in criminal
COURT" whereupon the House laughed merrily.
To this Gen. Garfield replied: " L was in
hopes that there would be some here; but /
see none;' whereupon the House laughed
again. Encouraged by his success Gen. But
Ter followed it up by asking hisfntertocutor-
when the Speaker reminded him that it was
contrary to the rule of the House to refer to
conversation with the President,-if he didn't
wish the House ,cds criminal court so as to
avoid that rule. And in response the House
roared once more. Thus far the antagonists
had only been polishing the keen weapons in
their controversial armory. The climax
came in few minutes later when Garfield
gave utterance to the striking, original and
profoundly significant remark that Butler was
"not the keeper of his political conscience"
to which the ready Butler instantly replied
II never knew that you had anyp' Of course
this was irresistible, and the House abandon
ed itself to renewed merriment.
1t is due to the House to say that such per-
sonal encounters have been less common than
usual during the present session of Congress.
This happy result has been largely due to the
quiescent state of the member from the Essex
district, who has evidently kept his great
powers in reserve for the Titantic encounter
with Garfield to which we have just referred
But one is surprised in looking over recent
volumes of the Globe to find how large num-
Der of its pages are filled with rectals neither
more nor less entertaining and important
than the above. For whole weeks it has
seemed as if honorable members were not
happy unless some one of their number was
making personal explanation" or ''repell-
ing personal attack or s'making a retort,"
or "hurling back with scorn and indignation
the false and scurrilous statements" of
some other honorable gentleman. Quick
ness in a mere you're another kind
of wit often seems to be the criterion
ofmerit in the minds of Congressman, rather
than statesmanlike grasp of important sub
jects and conscientious devotion to official du-
ty. All this might be tolerable if only little
genuine pleasantly were occasionally evolved.
But so far during the present session we re-
member only one indisputably witty retort,
and that was marTed by its unmistakable bru-
tally. S. S. Cox, having controversy with
colored member, was derided by white
Republican on the ground that the black man
had the best of it. Cox very sharply replied
that the admi ration for the colored mans
speech was like that bestowed on a certain
celebrated picture-it did not arise at all from
its merit as work of art but from the knowl-
edge of the fact that it was painted with the
toes! And this is the bright, consummate
flower of Congressional wit for the last two
years. But the expense of the poor substi-
tute for humor which has been accorded the
ovefHtry Is TO be estimated by hundreds -uI
thousands of dollars.