Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1872-02-16

A COMPLEX COMEDY IN REAL LIFE.-A
most amusing comedy in real life IN thus re-
lated by the Springfield Republican. the locale
being the town of Westteld; Mrs. James
Blakesley complained of her husband several
weeks since for i'll treatment, but after the
case had been continued until week ago Sat
urlay, she reported that she had made up
with her erring lord, and wished to withdraw
the complaint on the payment OF costs These
amounted to $l2 for the cost of court and
$3.50 for witness fees They hadn't the
money, but promised to bring it the next Sat
urday and the court kindly continued the case
again till that time Elated at the prospective
settlement, the man traded his horse for anoth-
er Notwithstanding his own had been mortgag-
ed to business man of the town. and paid
Sl1 to boot borrowing the money of the Chief
of Police whom he promised to pay when he
came to court again gu Saturday.
Promptly at the appointed time the lltlgant
but now rcconcled couple reappeared at the
court, and James, with sorrowful face, reclted
the loss of his pocket book, and obtained the
consent of the justice to go out and search TOR
it, While he was gone, his wife, who remain
ed at the Office alarmed the court BY amounc-
ing that she was in labor, aud the Chief OF Po-
lice was hurriedly Sc sent for aud the woman
placed in his care. The officer. however, hud
managed to spend several hours in fruitless
search for the pocket-book But mean time
one of the town fathers had found it while on
his way to selectmen $ meeting, and when he
opened it and found who the owner was a
brother selecman remembered that he had
bill against Bakeslcy. So he got out writ
OF attachment covering the amount, and called
on the Chief of Police (who was himeelf inter
ested to the amount of the SD to serve it
The Ckiet, with tragic air, which betokened
the depth of his emotion, did his duty, attach
cd the money for the Selectman, and after all
claims had been paid had just five cents left
for his The court finding Itself thus euchred
by its own weapon, the law, continued the case
another week the Chief took a mortgage on
the new horse to secure his debt ; the business
man who had the mortgage on the old horse
started out in anxious search for the purchaser
thereof, and the hero of the story, bewildered
at the tickle way fortune had treated him. got
gloriously drunk.
VIRGINIA AGAINST THE w Esr-The tables
in the monthly report Of the Agricultural De
partment, showing the relative prices and
yield per acre of the principal crops IN the
United States are very interesting and valua-
ble. Some very surprising facts are here shown.
The highest average yield of corn, ast year was
-,
Nebraska is | blshel less, and Kansas y bush.
els behind. Illinois and Ohio give 3S3, and
Wisconsin and Minnesota BIZ, nearly. Yer
mont and New Hampshire go 35a, making up
for their cold climate and sterile soil ln tho
rough culture. Virginia yields 224, and West
Virginia 274, and the lower Atlantic and Gulf
States yield from 10 to IA bushels
The average price per bushel i'll Illinois was
81 cents, and in Virginia it was 81 cents. So
that while an average acre OF corn was worth
only SD 26 in Illinois it was worth $l5.07 10
Virginia. This little fact is full Of significance.
mon it we base an irresistible conclusion IN
favor Of the superior cheapness of our lands;
Give us the enterprise capital, and Skill OF
Northern States, and we will bring up our
average to that of Iowa. We can afford to do
this. for the market is at our door.
Fertilizers are accessible and abundant. Our
corn lands can be purchased at one-half the
price paid for those of Illinois, possessing equal
advantages We can improve our lands and
make them equal toSthose of the prairles, by
skilltul rotations, and it will pay. That is, the
lands there will pay for their own recuperatlon.
But no man must undertake it without capl.
tal Small capitals must be applied to small
farms here as elsewhere. We have yet to
learn of any man who has failed to succeed in
farming in Virginia, who knows how to farm,
and has used adequate capital.
We know that many men have come here
precisely as they go West, with no realizing
sense of the conditions of successful cultivation
here They have not fully met their anticipa-
tons, and SO speak discouragingly of the coun-
try. But such people go West by thousands,
fail there and do the same thing. ln the ear,
y settlement of the West one third Of all the
people who went there failed, and left in few
years But those who staid and weathered the
transient difficulties of pioneer life found COM
tort and competence
Virginia now enters the list as new State.
She offers to enterprise and capital, to the
seekers for beautiful and comfortable homes,
the highest inducements in climate, soil and
location-Rich. State .Jou,mul
TIE WOMAN THE PERIoD.-ladies have
long played billiards in private life, but in Bos-
ion, last Friday night Madame GARNER, "a
neat and rather pretty little French woman,
gave public exhibition Of her skill at Melodeon
Hall. She is the wife Of Prot. GARNER. himself
"a crack player and her game is described as
'partaking more of the sure than the brilliant,