The democrat. [volume] (Weston, W. Va.) 1868-1874, 1872-01-29
Facts and FancIes.

Clergymcn, like bnkemen, do good
deal Of coupling.
Honor yonr business or your business
will not honor you.
Chicago is said at present to he u para
disc for sign painters,
Consider Glass" is the name Of
n Boston painter and gln2ier,
Why is Irritation like plate powder?
Because it brightens mp spoons.
You cant get blood from stone, but
yon ca" get money from brick.
We seldom get into trouble by saying
"too little" but often by saying I" too
much"
A disgusted Ohioan, wishing to commit
suicide in novel manner, applied for
admission to n smallpox hospital
King Victor Emanuel cannot be in.
duccd to visit London, because he has
a presentiment that he will die there.
A delegation Of Mormons is en- route for
Washington, to secure legislation that
will protect their "pcculiar institution
A Detroiter who laughed at man who
had slipped down on an icy sidewalk, was
promptly knocked over by that individ-
unl.
The last ten years have witnessed a
singular mortality among some Of the
oldest and apparently best English news
papers
The very dearest place is the store
that don't advertise. Visit one, inquire
the prices, and then thank us for telling
the truth,
II is time now for the pnnstors Of the
period to make their annual note of the
anomaly that frieze cloth furnishes the
warmcst coats.
Some young men are little partinl to
blue-eyed maidens, others like dark,cyed
lasses, but the moneyed girls have the
most admirers.
An Indiana woman, on the death Of
her husband. telcgraphed n distant friend,
Dear Joseph is dead, Loss fully cover
ed by insurance.
An old lady who took her first ride in
the cars, remarked when the train run
of the tnck, "You fetch up rather sud
den, don't YEP"
"Mr. Brown, | owe you grudge re-
member that y 81 shall not be fright
ened, then for never knew you to pay
anything that you owed.
How many of our lady readers ever
dreamed that We send 10 Great Britain,
annually, fifteen million dollars in gold
for the single article Of spool cotton.
Four thousand persons bought slices
from the mammoth cheese recently sold
in Fanueil Hall, Boston. The aggre-
gate Of the sales amounted to S63l.4O.
A Sac County, Iowa, horse tried to
scratch his nose with his hind foot, the
other day, caught his hoof in the hal
ter, gave II jerk, and broke hisown neck.
A shawl manufacturer in Philadelphia
las spun u thread twenty.seven miles
long from one pound Of American wool.
It is one Of the greatest yarns on record.
A celebrated writer says that il one
could read it, every human being carries
his life in his face, md is good lookingOI
the reverse, ms thnt life has been good or
evil.
"Your dress" said husband to his
fashionable wife, "will never please the
men," "I don't dress to please men,"
was the reply, "but to worry other wo-
men.
The latest London announcement is u
nose machine, by which the most homcly
noses are pressed into the most fashion.
able shape according to the taste of the
owner.
The only way to keep all your friends
and make no enemies is to speak well Of
people when names are mentioned TO
you, but never to speak Of any one to
the third party.
In apprehension Of the smallpox, n
western papers says: "Viccinatel Polite
ness never hurts anybody, Smallpox
will not attack you il you allow vaccin-
alton to take your arm"
The Commission Of Internal Revenue
has decided II to be it his duty to collect
the tax on dividends from earnings dur
ing the last five months Gf 1871, and has
given orders accordingly.
A Pittsheld woman makes IL regulnl
assessment OF S25 upon each of the Ii.
quor dealers in that town who sell the
ardent to her husband, and they come
down - rather than stand aprosecution,
The Courier Journal, Of Louisville,
does this "Cincinnati has m Appara-
tus for consuming her own smoke, II
she would now take another stride and
consume her own whisky, we might
point to her with pride"
In Siberia, during the winter, milk is
bought and sold in frozen state, and
can be long carried in simple bag.
When required for use the requisite
quantity Is chopped OF with n hatchet or
sheath.knife, and thawed rs needed.
A winnebago county, Wis woman
who hns paid taxes on her house for
many years, and who has been female
suffrage advocate during all that time,
now declares that she will stand il no
longor-she will vote or burn her house.
, A lawyer prosecuting a thief recently
/ on circuit, remarked severly Of him thnt
"Opportunity makes the thief. "Not nj.
: ways, sir, replied the Innocent. IL
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