Richland beacon., 1872-09-07
Resurrection Of Mrs. SparhinS.

Uoratio SparkinS j. one of the bright
and Shinin" lights Ot the mrrCanil" COM
munitv of the Queen City. lie attends
closely To business during the week. a.
tends church twice a day on Sunday, sub
,rribrS literally To tn" Relief lnon-
Bethel Cause. AMI other public charities
and reads the acknowledgment of the
SAME in the morning papers with great
satisfaction. Although on the shady side
Of forty. lac j. in an excellent state of pres
crvatinn: dresses very neatly. and Il
wi:hai. somnllin. of Il dandy in regard I"
his personal appearance. 80
He has two great troubles I'll llfr.
His first and greatest is his better half;
Mrs. :. is tall, angular. not at all good
lookng-a great >hrcw. and of very leai-
ouS diSpoSition-So much 50 that SparklnS
is very sorry to enter his OWN house. ana
exceedingly Glad To get ont ot II. lis
second trouble is that he is partially bald:
He tries to hide this defect by Il skilliu'
manipulation of his back hair, but Is NOT
very "r,oFggYfiS Fgfssfiff6pl if:6Ipu j in the effort.
cum,,lating plentiful store OF worldly
| Goods. and lives in an elegant residence III
! tho vest end. At the time OF which we
,''r;,a h;s family consisted ot himself.
Mrs. =. and her cousin. n'''''
Mrs. Sparkins lay upon her death he'd.
So said the doctOr-;:nd doctors are
generally allowed to be judges in sti'ii
matters: besides. DR.. Muddlcpate l. apro~
l,.>,or of the medical college. lives III a
stone front house in fashionable local
ity. and has an extensive practice among
the bon ton, of the city-rajson dc PITS.
.Is there no hope. Doctor said Polly
Perkins. -,
rs there no hope?' said IlOratio Tho
mas.
Being the lady's husband. he spoke last,
of course.
The doctor looked ut the di-conSoiatc
wilower a., posse. drew forth hi- watch,
and silently indicating the hour OF itweiVc,
he soemnly shook his head.
Il am very sorry to hear it. ejaculated
Sparkins.
- Alas nv poor cousin" sobbed rolly.
As an impartial historian. truth compels
us TO say that iIOratio neither Sobbcd nor
sighed. his grief was too decp-seated Tor
such outward manifestations.
..Sbe was so good. so kind, and so p'-
Gus" Sobbcd Polly.
$50 amiable. so humble. and sucha %ood
manauer.' said Sparkins. y low moan
from the subject Of their eulOgics. showed
that they were not altogether lost upon
her. and that her parting spirit rcjoiced i'll
the testimonial to her virtues.
She was too good for earth AMI did
NOT deserve her. but she is going now. and
where shall get such another cohtih-
ucd he.
another" sobbcd Polly. - she moved
closer to him.
What is to become of my house and
what is TO become of me. P0lly!-fhrrc
IN, his and y SOLITARY ItlT
trirllrd down his nose. ''ill Jump oil the
SUSPENSION bridge and drown myself;
but when he thought of the lee and the
cold water. he appeared undecided. ami
his ewes roaming gloOmily around the
opartmcnt. could rest upon no object nut
the svmpathizin. face of pretty Poiiy
Perkins. He was seated on the side OF
the bed. Come here. Polly said he. and
+ edpin" along he made room for her by his
side. Now it is hard 10 carry on a con
+ yersation with no one looking at you, ana
she having modestly turned her face away
, he GENTLY took her bv the chin. and ruril-
mo her face toward his. looked her stead
, ilv in the eye.
! >" Where shall get such another" said
f Horatio.
I "Therc'S the widow 99ie9. S"S
Polly. ,,,.
: Pooh, pooh she's an old ha. ou-
hut what 10 YOU say TO Polly Perkins:
. The murder was out. and he felt lnliil
t, itclv relieved. His hand Clasncd hers: u
was a pretty little hand with long tape'
= finners and almond shaped nails. Nhcl
ones right hand holds that of pretty
woman. there is only one thlngto be done
with the other. IIOratio's left arm nalli
- rally encirclcd the supple waist oil III
= lovely Polly.
II He drew her closer 10 him and leanln:
r forwarl-tleir lips met in lovely KS
nectar and ambrosia. There was iittl
round polished patch on the summit q
IIoratio's peri-crani,,H, from which TN
le hair had gradually rcceded; sort I.
IN o1sis. or rather miniature mountai
" neak, rising above the highest point
reyetation. Ii was on this spot. und'
Tended alike by AIT and Nature. that
This moment blow descended with te
rible whack.
he 1 he interesting couple sprang to the
ne feet and turning about quickly. bcLeli
he .iuht that well nigh petrified them;
b. III L... l-|.s.ot M,S'ij'' -dt ooiu Upl - "a.
he he'd. her ewes no LONGER Glazed with Il
mt film Of approaching. dissolution, but flas
,r- iu.r fire: while in her hand she held
IN heavy hair brush. Il weapon OF might.
ac- Uoratio bloody head could testify. ii
~. RAGE had broken her qun>y. an! aithon:
ne she could not speak. and was nearly ci'
~ sed. the rapidity Of her gutteral in'"r 81
arr lion. arcuei well for her future cl9qurnI
But 'i 1r>. Sparli.e recovered, The fair Poi
rld ,,.a ,.arlI>hed. hut oh Heavens. what a ]
~! fIoratio has led since then.
eu >>--
ri \ CERTAIN Ms, un"uarjrdly volu
it, tcrrcd the remark IN Il !hmi!y-c!rcle Tii
ard when gentlemen eat WARM maplc-sug
lly i, net> into their muStachcs and nal
he them Scratchv." Her filthcriS curious
in, + h,, f.tt,I ~