The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1872-07-30
AN UNPLEASANT FIX.


found the premises wrapped that determ-
ined to give a lively surprise, but Nature
appealing to me in vital point, dropped
into the dining room with view of re-
way of preliminary. --......-...
Striking light, found that my wants
had been anticipated for there on the table
lay the remains of a repast-breast of
chicken, cakes, cheese and what not. Be-
ing sharp set, pitched, in, glass of old
port materially assisting the process of di-
gestion.
All at once my eye caught sight of
meerschaum on the mantle. Now, there is
nothing very alarming in meerschuam
per, SO, but when the meerschaum is the
property of stranger, and is found upon
ones premises during his absence, it be-
comes invested with an importance which it
could derive from no other circumstance
There was also paper of Turkish tobacco
"The fellow has taste, at all events" said
I, and filed and smoked, drank bumper
and cogitated.
Now Maria knows | am not in the least
bit jealous; knows it had never entered my
head to suspect her of an impudence but
this to say the least of it, had very sus-
picious look. drank again. Yet l pro-
test l was not at all jealous. At that mo-
ment started from my seat as if at the
touch of an electric battery for on the set
tee in the corner lay an impudent looking
hat and cane, and even pair of gloves
To smash the hat into smithereens, to tear
the gloves into fragments, to snap the cane
into finters was the work of moment. I
took another bumper, and folding my arms,
glared maiestically around. Not that /
was jealous o, dear, no
was resuming my seat and pipe, to
cogitato over course of prosecution, when
/ received another shock My eye had
alighted upon note which had fallen from
the table, 1t was feminine hand. "Dear
Charlie" it ran, "I'm so glad you've ar
rived. Sammy's away. Don't stand upon
ceremony. Wen have each nice time
Cold lunch and all agreeable. Come over
at once.'
Sammy's my name. "Perfidious wo-
man |! 1t is thus"
/ threw it into the fire after tramping
on it. fortified myself with another glass,
took of my stockings, and started up stairs.
On the way stumbled over strange cat in
the kitchen.
In my ascent l supposed l must have
made some noise, for strange dog set up
furious yell in thebank area. 1t may be
as we'll to go prepared for contingencies, I
reflected, as / re-entered the parlor with
view of possessing myself of a poker. Dark
as it was, secured the desired object, and
was retreating, when l fancied somebody
came in on tip-toe. Holding my breath
lodged past him, and crept up stairs like
a thief, not that / was jealous, but only to
see what was going on. After pause,
during which could count the beating of
my heart, l tried the bed room door. 1t
was not locked and all was dark within.
A gentle snore-not rough, exasperating,
reckless thing, but more of musical moan,
came from the bed.
"She was asleep" unused I, "the sleep
of the virtuous, and what / thought the
step of strangers toes was the tread of
the cat. Poor, dear Maria how could / so
wrong you?" disrobed and slipped into
bed.
"Charlie, how long you have been here ~
said feminine voice.
Gracious goodness lit was that of a
stranger A cold perspiration broke out
all over me as / reflected upon the horrors
of my situation. The house / bought was
one of pair which had been built exactly
alike, and, coming fatigued and sleepy
direct from the cars, must have entered
my neighbours mansion instead of my own!
Excuse me DEAR" whispered; 81
think hear burglars"
"What again think you must be
mistaken"
"Ill go and see," said /, and bundling
on something, / groped my way TO the
stairs, descending them with cold feeling
all the way down my back, and crept into
the basement. There / madeanother ap-
palling discovery-the clothes had put ON
were somebody else's and not my own.
Safe on the sidewalk, glanced up at the
house from which / had just escaped,
thinking how should manageto return my
borrowed toggery.
And it was my house after all.
Resolved on an explanation, rung the