Oregon Republican. [volume] (Dallas, Or.) 1870-1872, 1872-04-06
Facts and EfaEacaes.

necessary to take a receipt.
"Have snake 7" is the San Fran
cisco interrogation for drinks.
What kind Of ascent is descent? "A
trip up, for it brings you down.
The quickest way for a man to forget
all common miseries-Wear tight boots.
A Wyandotte journalist saves time
aud ink by dating his letters 8 \ ~.
A stitch in time saves nine. Those
who have a stitch in the side, be thank,
fu!
Mr.. Kellogg of indianapolis, felt Of a
buzz-saw, to see if it was going. 1t
was
Though lost to sight, to memory
dear" as the man said when he paid his
dinner bill.
A miser's first rule in arithmetic is
addition, but his heirs generally begin
with division.
Remus was asked, how many oysters
he could cat" Any gwen number,
was the reply.
Pawubrokers and lrlnkards> arc al
ways taking pledges the former some
times keep them.
The intelligent composition pleasantly
alludes to L" Alexis the noble Russ, as
" Alexis the noble kuss."
Vegetables being scarce in Arazona
the miners swap diamonds with the far
mers-carat for carrot.
The pedestrian Weston doesn't appear
at any more Of his trials" lie ha,
taken leg bail, probably -Bosto's Post
Ii the Beaur are expected to go in
the way they are bent, should not the
BeHe's be expected to so where they are
told?
A common plagiarism now is to steal
from the tail of rooster for the sake
of putting a feather in oae's own cap os
hat.
C!evelanders are making merry over
old COW, spriukled with assai9;ida, and
labeled " Buffalo meat killed by Alex
is"
A twelve.Year-old boy in Connecticut
is appropriately known as a young
shaver" having heavy growth ot
beard.
/ never knew a dog, of eny breed
whatSumever, to take hydcrioby alter
they had been thoroughly vaceinated
with buckshot. Bitiiogs.
4 chandler having had some candles
stolen, person lid hIm be of good cheer,
- for in a short time" said he " they
will all come to light.
4 Boston coroner has been accused
of presenting bills for viewing bodies
that he never saw. lie gets 81 head
aud gets head about 81 every time,
"Ah !" unused Smith as he contcm,
plated his very extensive collection Of
New Years bills, g how true it is that
in the midst of life We are in debt"
Never receive even two lines from a
horse without being sure you have The
proper address, aud never under any
circumstances drop line to horse.
\ man found druak, gave as an ex-
cuse that he was merely celebrating the
87th birthday Of his mother, who was an
inmate Of the Gloucester poorhouse.
A temperance editor in drawing al
tcntion to an article against ardent spir-
its in one of his papers, says: :" For
the effects Of 1utcmpocrnce, see our in
side.
A young man having late railroad
disaster in his mind has broken his en-
gagemcnt with young lady, b.cauSe
she wears train aud is Negligent about
her switch.
A young lady requested to be reIens,
ed from her marriage engagement on the
ground that when she contracted she
believed her lover " duck " but has
since fouGd him to be a goose"
"A brick fell from the scatIo'd the
other day on the head Of q negro. Fling
dem are peanut she'll ouodcr way, up
there, won't ycr?' Was the darkcys adj
vice as he scratched his head.
A conscientious amateur member Of
brass band inhabits a locality near tl
to my room | don't wish him any
harm-but | sometimes wonder if brass
baud men ever have the small poz.--
Chicago Reporter.
I" Molly shut the door; its getting
awful cold in here p was the remark ol
an Albany husband, as he hung his
coat on htching post and prepared tc
retire to the curbstone, under the i'm
preston that he had arrived ut home.
A man in Danbury has discovered
that powder fried in lard was good for
boils. lie tried il. The stove cover
is in the second story now, though most
all the rest Of the stove has been collec'
ted. lie was deceived III his lard, he
says Ddnbary News.
Opelica, Ala, has created sensation
by the new leap year mode Of eating