The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1872-10-10
3 f From All the Year Round.
A Round Of Very Old Jokes

tue cosmopolitan character of ane
dote and humor, and the curious fide
ity with which the same joke, a
though localized and assigned to
particular individual in one countr,
is found to reproduce itself anon
ether races and nationalities. ~
1 It is less commonly known throug
how long line of traditions tines
amerry iests" have come down to ou
! day, ana how many of the drollerie
sill popular among ourselves, arc a
! most literal reproductions of the fu
and huinor which shook the sides c
generations past and gone in remot
ages of antiquity. -
/ Probably one Of the very last quar-
tiers to which modern humorist i
search of specimens of the wit an
hnfnor of the ancients would think Q
turning, wonld be the works of tn
philosophers; and among the philoso
pliers, perhaps the least promising
would seem to be the spirituaIize
and dreamy school of the Neo Plato
nists. One might with equal appear
ance of probability, expect to find
rechauffe of Joe Miller in the, meta
physics Of Reid, o. In Bishop Berke
1ey's Minute Philosopher, or look TO
string of puns and comicAlities, sue
as Hoods in WordswOrth's EXcuf
sion. Nevertheless if the readers Gu
riosity be active enough to encountei
the trouble of looking through a ittl
known and very anattractive volume
printed in the seventeenth century
the works of Hierocles, Neo Plato
mist philosopher, who lived at Alex
andria about the year 450-he will
find, strangely associated with n Bool
on Providence, Fate and Free Will,
Pythagoras, and seven books On Du
ties to the Gods, to Parents, and te
Society, little collection of Asteia OF
Pleasantries, which, with few modi
fications OF name and place, would il
almost every respect TALL in with the
tone of q modern jest-book, and NIGH
take it's place most appropriately as d
supplementary chapter to Joe Miller
Perhaps it is only reverent to the
memory of the grave Neo Piatonist to
add, that although printed among his
acknowledged E, works, and formerly
ascribed to him as author, the verdict
of modern criticism has set this judg-
meHt aside, and assigned the author
ship of the Asteia to- another Hicro-
cles, of later date and of yeryaitferior
fame, fr.rf;-r ,,l,..-ts..7 ,.=t7..,{
But whoever may have been the
author of this little collection of COM
icalities. it is impossible not to be
struck by the fidelity with which their
spirits, and almost, their very terms,
have been handed down to us through
all the intervening centuries. Even
the hero, OF more properly, perhaps,
the victim, of those pleasantries. (tor
they are almost invariably at his ex-
pense,) is Identical with his represen-
tative in modern anecdote. He is q
pertain Scholasticus or "schoolman," :"
The Dominic Samson of Sir, Walter
5cott's novel whose simplicity, awk-
wardness and want of perception OF
he fitness of things, betray him into
III kinds OF, blunders and absurdities.
No special nationality, is assigned to
in the Asteia, but his
)lundefs are for the most part of the
lass which the modern anecdotist
would ascribe to an Irishman, and
which among the Greeks were popu-
arlv represented as characterizing the
people Of Abdera. va = 49, 90
Z Every oone for example, has heard
he Irish counterpart of the follow
ng: oufi; ff.5e9va sftf L.
sOne of ftwin-brothers having died,
soon afterwards chanced
o meet the survivor. WAS it you
hat died, said he, 'or your brotherP
gain, there is a story still popular
mong our story-tellers, of a gentle
aan writing a letter at his club, and
reaking off in the middle of the page
y telling his correspondents that he
ad great deal more to write, but
an go no further, on account of a con-
ounded Irishman, who is looking
yer his shoulder and reading every
rord as he puts it on the paper, ,where-
pom the Irishman uncQnsciously con-
let's himself by solemnly declaring
nat he had not read one single line
f the letter. Who can fail to see the
erm of this anecdote in the analogous
lunder of Schlasticus? -
"When Scffolasticus was in Greece,
friend wrote to request that he |
rould buy some books for him. |
neglected the commits !
on. After some time, when he re-
lrned home, he met his friend. BY. |
le-by,' said he, i never received that
tier which you wrote me about the |.
ooks when was in Greece :3nog1
There is another well known Joe
[iller story about an Irish soldier,
'ho, during battle, was. carrying
d his back wounded comrade toI
I'VE his leg amputated by the surgeon.
n the way to the ambulance, q can
On ball, without the IrishmaD's per-
living it, carried away the wounded
ans head, and the surgeon. when he
w the headless body, rated the Irish
an for bringing. him such a case.
BY the powers" replied the Irish
an, she told me it was his Leg" This
under is7anticipated is almost in its
cry terms by Scholasticus.
"Scholasticus's son was sent off by
8 father to the wars. When he was
tting out from his home he promis-
his father that he would bring back
him the head of one of the enemy:
)hv said Scholasticus, i don't care
you don't come back without your
vn head, provided only see you |
me back safe and happy ~
Still more literal is the identity of &
e modern story of the Scotchman's
,rse, which just died as the owner
ID brought it to live OH straw q
", with the joke against Soholasti-
ls. sad 4GE .guuiH #a1oi 1in IA1
"Scholasticus wishing to train his
,rse to live. on very little, gradually
ok away the fodder from him. AT
myth, of course, the horse died of
arvation. what a pity Z said Scho-
sticus, just as i had trained him to
1e on nothing he dies!' g3aHsT6, sIIa
There are similar prototypes ofthe
ish bull, or the Irish hlunder.
in trying to learn to
vim has narrow escape from
owning. Straightway he vows that
,e will never tOnch water again till
} shall first have learned how to
vim" s.t
A friend tells him that no was :
canning about him last night, and 1
at he imagined he met him and sa- (
ted him. 81 beg your pardon" said
"for not returning the |
lutte, but 1 did not observe you"
Another OF his friends falling seri-
Isly ill Scholasticus goes to see him.