The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-06-14

lore election. he gOuS. III ulaheS our
now parched lips almost become moist
again just while thinking about the
gallons of soda water and m~intjulips,
and sherry-gobblerS and other deli
cious nectar which IA almost funnel
cd down We editor by We aspiring can
didates. What an angel q candidate
Is, to be sure. lie will shake hands
with you a dozentimes q day, even if
he must cross tls street to accomplish
it. lie win tre.t his relatives almost
rs well as other folks; eat heartily of
the most ~unyalatable meal without
growing; kiss raptuously a baby who
is so dirty that you could locate a
homestead upon its face; smile at an
old maid without a perceptible GRIM
ace; abstain from kissing the hired
girl for a whole week; let his mother
In-Iaw stay at his house over night
without telling her to go to the infer
nal regions; and finally cap the climax
of his angelic conduct by paying all
arrearages on his paper n buying
-onesor two extra copies, lin which his
name occurs twenty timesl to sem to
friends in tithe States" What a de-
Iishtfui fellow a candidate is II the
world were fuller OF candidates every
baby would have Il lap full OF sugar
plums, every old maid 4 beau, every
gushing young Miss a Dolly Warden pet
tieoat, every hungry hummer a full
stomach and every eiitor a plethoric
purse and Il new box OF paper collars
But in the hushet Of election times
there are hardly cafdiiates enough to
go round, and at tie present writing
there is a WofGI de.rth of the blessed
4'critters.Fr In fact just now the II
date business Is played out, mizied,
collapsed, k~erfiummixed, evaporated
as 1t were, andleft the whole world TO
wander, thirsty and hungry, On the
shores of time, until the annual V
lutions aud diurnal rotations of the
earth around its own axes brings us
again TO that delicious season when
candidates do flourish AID blossom as
the p0sies.
WHERE DID THY COME PROM
Some enterprising naturalist has dis
covered that the Indians of America
originated from the Japanese, q band
OF whom drifted to these shores in a
wrecked vessel many hundreds of
years ago. We 'spect lots of these
greasy, thieving, begging, red devils
will be glad TO learn ven al this late
day that their-ancestors easae from
.sfurren parts'' and did o really get
their start in Tamhill as has always
been supposed. 1t is even a relief 10
Us, although we know that the aver
age North American Indian is a pal
pable fraud, to ascertain for a surety
that in his earlier and primative state
he really was somebody, even if that
somebody was only fourth mate on
japanese junk bound for "Amenkyr
bottom-side up. This discovery may
be a little rough on the japanese, but il
will give dignity to a race of creature;
who never before We're found to bt
possessed Of a single attribute which
would serve to eomL,end them to tn,
favor of humanity.
THAT SMALLPOX RUMoR.-The Sa
lem Statesman of last Wednesday say
it is informed that three children 0
Jack AlIphin OF this city, are sick witt
SMALLPOX. Now we desire TO inform
the Statesman that there is no a rarfi
Gle of truth in this ruRor. We called
personally at Mr.. ATphin's residence
yesterday morning and saw all three
of the children spoken of, and they
were scudding about, perfectly wei
and hearty and as full of devilmenf
generally as all bright, healthy chill
dren are supposed to be. There is no
now a single case of smallpox in Al
bany, and neUer has been. We sal
this with the utmost confidence, be
cause neither the city authorities, thu
resident physicians, nor common ru-
NOR know of any such cases. OF course
the Statesman, and other papers which
have copied its article, will do our city
the justice to make the correction.
BASE BALL-ALBANY VICTORIOUS
The second tournament of the mattel
game of base ball between the Athlet
les, of Corvallis, and the Quicksteps
of Albany, came off in this city las
Saturday, and after a holly CONTESTED
combat resulted in a victory FOR TIT
Quicksteps. The score stood 81 to 65
AS the Athletics won the first tourna
ment "honurs are easy" between TIL
Clubs thus fa;r, and it Will require tn
third game to d.stermine which is th,
champion Club. The game will b.
played at Monmouth, tomorrow at
a. n. We trust our bt.ys will practic'
diligently and INCREASINGLY, and b
ready to scoop up the Corvallis Teller
in good shape.
AMERICAN NEWSPAPER DIREt TORY
I'VE are indebted to Geo. P. Row. IL 4
Co, Advertising Agents, New Yo,k
4 for a copy of this volnminous ana.
useful book. Every business man
OF enterprise should have a copy of the
work. To such it will be Invaluable.
Messrs. Rowell & Co. are. the most sue
cessful and prompt advertising agents
with whom we have ever done busi-
ness.
DECREASE IN VoTEs.AThe vote of
Linn county this year is II less than