The Lincoln County herald., 1872-04-18

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mat, crushed in my breast. Tie deep
remembrance Of the sense hid Of be
ing utterly neglected and hopeless Of
the shame l felt in my position Of the
misery it was to my young heart to be.
lieve that, day by day, what had
learned, and thought, and delighted in,
and raised my fancy and my emulation
up by. was passing away from me, never
to be brought back any more, cannot be
written. My whole nature was so pens
trated with the grief and humiliation Of
such considerations, that even now, ia.
nous and caressed and happy, | often
forget in my dreams that have a dear
wife and children even that am man
and wander dosolately back to that timo
Of nv life.
III was so young and childish, and so
little qualifed--how could be other
wise to undertake the whole charge Of
my whole existence, that, in going to
hungerford Stairs of morning, could
not resist the stale pastry put out at half
price on trays at the confectioners' doors
in Tottenham Court Road and often
spent in that the money should have
kept for dinner. Then [ went without
my dinner, or bought roll, or slice Of
pudding. There were two pudding shops
between which | was divided, according
to my finances. One was in court close
to st Martins Church Cat the back of the
church) which is now removed altogether.
The pudding at that shop was made with
currants, and was made rather special
pudding, but was dear; two pennyworth
not being larger than a pennyworth of
more ordinary pudding, A good shop
for the latter was in the Strand, some
where near the Lowther Arcade is now
1t was stout hale pudding, heavy and
fabby; with great rasns in it, stuck in
whole, at great distances apart. 1t came
up hot, at about noon every day and
, many anu many a day did dine off it.
ave had half an hour, l think, for
tea. When had money enough, | used
, to 90 to coffee shop, and have half a
pint Of coffee, and a slice of bread ana
butter. When had no money, took
? turn in the Convent Garden market, and
, sta, ed at the pneappes.
. | know l do not exaggcrate, uncOn-
: sciously and unintentionaly, the scanti.
ness Of my resources aud the difficulties
of my lie know that if shilling or
! SO were given me by any one, l spent il
, in dinner or tea. | know that
, worked from morning till night, with
e common men and boys, q shabby child
0 | know that tried, but Intellectually, moi
h to anticipate my money, and to make it
!, asst the week through, by putting il
away in drawer had IN the counting
: house, wrapped in six little parcels, eact
= parcel containing the same amount anc
t labelled with different day. | know
that have Iounged about the streets, in
y sufficiently and uusaj isfactorily fed.
e know, that but for the mercy Of God,
n might easily have been, for any care tina
f was taken Of me, a little robbsr or littl,
II vagabond.
"But held some station at the black
i, ing warehouse too. Besides that, my rel
y, ative at the counting house did what O
man SO occupied, and dealing with d
q thing so anomalous, could, to treat me a
h one upon different footing from th'
J.. rest. Lever said, to man or boy, how i
1 was that came to be there. That
suffered exquisitely, no one ever kne,
:, but I. How much suffered, 1t is, as
. have said already, utterly beyond IN,
:, power to tell. No mans Imagination cal
a overstep the reality. But kept my Owl
n counsel, and l did my work. kney
"a from the first, that, if could not do m.
work as well as any Of the rest, coul,
. not hold myself above slight and con
: . tempt. | soon became, at lecst, as expe
n dt,ous and as skillful with my hands q
n either of the other boys.
G My rescue from this kind of exlsteuc
it | considered quite hopeless, and sban
1t doned as such, altogether; though l an
a solemnly convined that l never, for on
d hour was reconcled to it, or was OF her
o wise than miscrably unhappy.
u AT last, one day, my father, and tn
'r relative so often mentioned, quarreled
y quarrslled by letter, for took the lette
'f from my father to him which caused tb
a explosion, but quarrslled 6ercsly.
3, was about me.
z "My mother set herself to accommo
b date the quarrel, and did 80 next day
g She brought home request for me l.
n return next morning, aud high charac
ter of me, which am very sure ! de
% served. My father said should 60 bac
:; no more, and should go to school. l d.
y not write resentfully or angrily for
i. know how all these things have WORKED
n together to make me what l am; but
f.; never afterwards forgot, never shal
: forget, never can forget, that my mothe
5, was warm for my being sent back.
y "From that hour until this at which
,, write, no word of that part Of my child
'' hood which | now gladly brought to
s. close has passed my lips to any human
rs being. have no idea how long it lasted
u whether for year, or much more, or less
Frou that hour until this my father an'
n' my mother have been stricken dumb upo