Oregon Republican. [volume] (Dallas, Or.) 1870-1872, 1872-06-29
Facts aRnd Efaaacaes.

sectIng room.
Wise men learn more by fools than
do fools by wise men.
a ASpanish proverb says One Il did"
is worth two Il wish | had"
When women come to sit in the jury
box, infants may become criers in court.
An artesian we'll is to be sold at
auctlon-The purchaser to remove it
Virginia, says the New York WorM
reports Timothy as promising a good
crop, but says nothing about Paul.
"Mr. Speaker, straddle that blind"
was the phrase in which poker-play-
ing Californian legislator seconded the
motion.
The Pail NAL Gaze1e says of cer>
tain Irish court, that it is never 50 sure
to be wrong as when the judges are
unanimous.
A fractions wife threw bottle OF
hair renewer at her husbands head, at
which he exclaimed I'VE must part,
the dye is cast
1t has been decided, that when a
man SO far torgets himself as to bite
off another individuals nose, be ought
to be bound over to keep tie piece,
leave you, my friend said tipsy
fellow ciinsing to u lamp-post on a dark
night; ''leave you in condition not to
take care OF yourself, He, never -
Dick pays no compliments to lively Sail;
She says she don't expect 'en from that quarter
~ on're fishing for compliment, my grl;
"No Dick, indeed-not IN such shaliow water"
y youthful aspirant for epistoary
honors wrote the following to his little
friend Dear Johnny-I thought |
would write you letter. Answer this
Alfred Jingle's dog is surpassed in
New Bedford, whore they have pointer
that came to dead stand still before
door plate bearing this inscription '.A
Partridge"
Few men would attemp. to dry damp
gunpowder IN Ii kitchen stove. \ man
In Canada did-liis afflicted family
would be glad OF any Information as TO
his whereabouts.
y Subscriber writes to an editor, Il
dont want our paper any longer" To
which the editor replied, Il wouldn't
make 1t any longer,lf You did; It's present
length suits me very we'll.
The following is a veritablc transcript
from the record OF will admitted to
probate IN the State OF New lorA Il
bequeath my body to the grave, ny
soul to its maker, aud the remainder vi
my property to my vile.
a man called another an cxtortioner
for suing him. Why, my fuend, re-
piled the man who brought suit, II did
1T to obiige." ''ro oblige me, indeed
how SO p why to obIige you to pay
me, was the reply.
An exchange relates, that during a
cold night lady acquaintance put her
two boys in bed iu cold room, tucked
them up and sat down on the edge OF
the BED to hear then. say their prayers.
Johnny aged seven, got through all
right and cuddled up to Willie, aged
five, who had just commenced TO say
his prayer Presently Willie began to
hurry, the words came. faster than he
could distinctly utter them, aud the
prayer ended. thus 81 pray the Lord
my soul to keep-ameu-take your
hand off from me or III warm your ear
for you" Johnny was tickling him.
Rosambcau, French actor of note,
was once playing at Anjou, when the
curtain rose to single spectator. The
actor stepped forward and addressed
the audience "My dear sir, did you
come to sec the play, or to see Rosam-
beau 2" "To see Rosambeau," was the
prompt reply well | am Rosambeau.
Don't you think we shall enjoy the evo~
ming much better together at neigh
boring cafe than if you compel me to
play TO you, who should be man OF
wit, in piece which poor one at best
and in which contrary to my usual Gus
tom, am only ordinary" Certainly |
do" replied the audience, "for l hur-
ried my dinner to get here in Season
we will go and finish it." And they
went,
The following questions are proposed
for Shakesperean scholars to answer:
Did the "booEs in the running brooks
contain flowing sentences Z"
If the "three thousand ducats we'll
of Shylock was an artesian one
If, when Richard saw "the sun of
York" there was any air apparent?
IF tho "Sermons in stones" weren't
hard reading?
IF those "who stood upon the order
of their going; at Macbeth's supper
did not have to set out without further
orders
What Bonquo "called on" Macbeth
for, if there was no speculation in those
eyes
When Richard refused to let the
"coffin pass" did he order it up?
Was it waist time when Puck "put
q pirdIe round tho earth in forty