The Placer herald., 1872-10-26
FREE BLOW. GUT IN AN OMNIBUS.

story of an adventure of two of her nabobs
which may or may not have occurred.
give it or what il is worth:
Colonel jim had seen somewhat of the
world, and knew more or less of its ways:
but Colonel Jack was from the back settle
ments of the State, and had led q life OF
arduous toll, and had never seen a city.
These two, blessed with sudden wealth
projected visit to New York-Col. Jacl,
to see the sights, and Col. jim to guard his
unsophstication from misfortune. They
reached San Francisco in the night and sailed
in the morning Arrived in New York Col.
Jack said:
"Fve heard tell Of carriages al my life,
and now | mean to have a ride in one; |
don't care what it costs. Come along
They stepped out on the side walk, and
Col. Jim called a stylish barouche. But
Col. Jack said:
"No, sir! None of your Cheap-John
tunouts for me- I'm here to have a good
time, AMI money amt any object. mean
to have the npbbiest rig that's going. Now,
here comes the very trick. Stop that yaller
one with the pictures on it don't you fret
I'll stand all the expenses myself.
So Col. Jim stopped an empty omnibus,
and they got in. Said Col. Jack:
CANT it gay, though? Oh, no, Irccken
not! Cushio and windows till you can't
rest What would the boys say if they
could sec us cutting such swell in New
York? =? BY George, wish they could see
u.s."
Then he put his head out of the window
and shouted to the driver;
"Say; Johnny, this suits me-suits yours
truly, you bet youl want this shebang all
day. I'm on it, old man! Let 'em out.
Make 'em 90! We will make it all right
with you, sonny!
The driver passed his hand through the
strap-bole and tapped for his f're-it was
before the gongs came into common use.
Col. Jack took the hand and shook it cor
daily. He said
"You twig me, old pard All right be-
tween gents. Smell of that, and see how
you like itl
And he pat a twenty dollar gold piece in
the drivers hand. After moment the driver
said he could not make change.
"Bother the change! Ride it out. Put
it in your pocket"
Then TO Col. Jim, with a sounding slap on
his thigh:
CANT it style, though? Hanged if
don't hire this thing every day for a week. "
The omnibus stopped, and a young lady
got in. Col. Jack stared for moment,
ihen nudgcd Col Jim with his elbow:
"Dont say word, " he whispered. "Let
,,cr ride if she wants to. Gracious. there's $
room enough. "
The young lady got ont her port-monnaic,
and handed her fare to Col Jack.
"What's this for?' said he.
"C'ive it to tbs driver, please
"Take back your money, madam. We
can't allow it, You're welcome to ride here
as long as you please, but this shebang's
chartered, and we can't let you pay cent. J"
The girl shrunk into a corner, bcwildered
An old lady with basket climbed in, and
proffcred her fare.
'Exeuse NE" said COL Jack, "You re
perfectly welcome here, madam, and don't
be the least uneasy. Make poursef just as
free as if you was in your own turnout"
Within two minutes three gentlemen, two
fat women, and couple of children entered.
"Come right along, friends" said Col.
Jack. "Don't mind us. This is free
blowout" Then he whispered to Col. Jim ::
'New York amt 10 sociablc place, | don't
reckon--t ain't no name for it!''
He resisted every effort to pass fares to
the driver, and made everybody cordially
welcome The situation dawned on the
people, and they pocketed their money and
delivered themselves up to covert enjoyment
of the episode. Half dozen more passcn-
gers entered.
ooh, there's plenty of room," said Col.
Jack. "NValk right in, and make your
selves at hone. A blowout amt worth
anything as blowout unless a body has
company" Then in whisper to Col. jim,
'But amt these New Workers friendly !?
And amt they cool about it it too? lcebergs
amt anywhere. | reckon they'd tackle
hearse if it was going thei way"
More passengers got in; more yet, and
still more. Both seats were filled, and file
were standing up, holding on to the cleats
overhead. Parties with baskets and bun
dies were climbing up on the roof Half
suppressed laughter rippled up from all sides.
'Wel for clean, cool, out-and-out check,
if this don't bang anything | ever saw, I'm
an Injun, whispered Col. Jack.
A Chnaman crowded his way n.
81 weaken!" said Col. Jack. "Hold on,
driverl Keep your seats, ladies and gents.
just make yourselves fre2-everythns' $
paid for. Driver, rustic these folks around
as long as they're a mind to go-friends of
ours, you know. Take them everywheres
and If you want more money, come to the
St. Nicholas and we'll make it all right.
Pleasant journey 10 you, ladies and gents
go it just as long as you please-it shan't
cost you cent: :"--Mark Ttcain.
II is stated that of the 264 railroads in the
United States only 1O4 pay dividends, the
other 26O never paying anything at all to the
stockholders.
Vl,o c,n,t ,+,oo,1orc cnual in tho world Is