The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1872-02-03
WIT AND WISDOM.

EXCUSE me, madam, but would like
to ask why you ! ok nc me 80 savagely ~
'Oh, beg pardon, sir I took You for my
husband
A FARMER saw an advertised recipe to
prevent wells and cisterns from freezing.
He sent his money and received his answer:
Take IN your well or cistern ON cold night
and keep it by the fire. ("
AT leap year purity in Atlantis, on the
9Th inst, the young ladies showed their
manliness by having the following notices
In conspicuous places I'VE mean bust
ness :: Now is our chance !" waiting il
tedious"
WELL, Lauchie, how are you r. Man,
I'm wonderful weel, considerin'." "Con
siderin'-what r. II did last NIGHT what
Two no dune this thirty year. qaed to
bed pairfutly sober, and I'm thankful to
say got mp this mornin' no bit the
waur."
On Sunday evening the Rev Mr.. Hep
worth, in discourse TO young men, spoke
OF james Fisk, Jr., as a man Of kind heart
and good deeds, but only great big boy,
without faith in anything but himself and
money. Great big boy, is good.
In French court recently, as a witness
was about to give his testimony, the adyo-
cate remarked wish to remark to the
court that this witness is entitled to entire
confidence, as he had not had time to con
suit his lawyer"
SOMEBODY is going to build hotel il
Rhode Island 92 feet long and so feet wide.
We shouldn't have supposed the authori-
ties would permit anybody to put the State
all under one reef in that way
"Do you know" said Miss higgins
(forty-three and spare-to spare indeedl.
81 am, oh such a sensitive, nervous, timid
thing am indeed y THAT surprises
me, | said. ''Oh but it's true, really /,
| am FRIGHTENED at my own shadow
That does not surprise me, / exclaimed.
AYoUTH seeing young woman shedding
tears over something in her lap, concluded
it was book and asked if it was Bulwers
last production which had affected her So
actuely. Il don't know who produced
them, but they were mighty strong onions, "
was the unrOmantic reply.
JOSH BILLINGS says Most men con
cede that it looks foolish to see a boy drag
ging heavy sled up hill for the fleetin
pleasure Of riding down again, but it ap-
pears to me that boy is sage by the side
Of that young man who works ali the week
and drinks up his wages on Saturday
night"
In a dialogue between soldier and a
peasant at cafe, the peasant, after stating
that the country had been betrayed during
the recent war, adduced as proof that all
the generals were living Yes, not one
has been killed" 'tNot one r. replied the
soldier. anxious for the honor of his gener-
al my general Of brigade was killed
twice.
The st. Louis Republican" contains a
want advertisement running thus "a
ruler wants a situation in country town.
Address Thomas Andrews, ''this Office. I
If deposed European sovereign is the
party advertising, no country town in want
Of such an article need be in haste to an
swer the call, as the supply largely exceed,
the demand
The telegraph makes strange blunders
with names. The latest California paper
received here have dispatches from New
York dated the Sth, which say that the
I" Rev. George Hopworthy yesterday an
nOunced his remuneration of Unitarianisn
and the adoption of the Orthodox doc
trine. Another paper says Mr.. H. wa,
IN favor of free lunches He said FIRE,
launches.