Vermont farmer. [volume] (Newport, Orleans County, Vt.) 1870-1877, 1872-11-22

was sitting quietly in my room one MORN
ing, when a note from my old friend, Lou
Livermore. was brought in. l am very fond
of Lou, as, indeed all her friends are /;
though she still remains, like Holmes aunt,
"The sole ungathered rose
On her ancestral tree"
She lives far up in the country, but occa.
sionally comes to Boston on a visit. Her note
was as follows:
Dear Hepsy,-Here 1 am in the Hub, at
the west end of it; is that the hubbiest part,
wonder? l AM coming over to see you on
Thursday. 1 meant to go to-day; but l
can't: I'm all used up,-"clear tuckered out"
as Aunt Polly used to say. What has done
it?" Why, my new dress; and such dress !!
1t will give you fits to see bow my back is
hunched up and pulled out. I'm a regular
balloon; a fashion-plate; anything that is
huge and hideous,-a camel or dromedary
for example; only they, poor things! were
born with humps on their backs, and l wasn't.
GLOW came l so deformed ?" In an evil
hour listened to the voice of the tempter,
and put myself into the hands of city
dressmaker.
"Shes very stylish" quoth the tempter.
Little rocked in my ignorance what that
meant; and l went to her rooms in sweet,
confding simplicity, bearing an innocent
looking dress-pattern under my arm. had
three seances with Mrs. Cuttit, a most impos-
ing parsonage, of whom l stood in mortal
terror and at length emerged, transformed.
went in slim; came out stout went
in erect came out hump-backed; | went
in plain came out bedizened; l went in
with forty dollars in my purse; | came out
with just enough to pay my fare home Oh
the street-car,-the collapse having been
transferred from my person to my purse with
incredible celebrity and ease.
Verify, fashion 'doth make towards of u;
all :" yea, and puf-balls also! wish bad
the courage to 60 through the world in q
gored gown without pinch or puffor pucker
in it but haven't, SO am balloon, that
by some incomprehensible machinery is rails.
ed into mountainous ridges. Sarmounting
these ridges, at right angles to my body,-ii
there be body inside this corrugated globe
of which l am in serious doubt, to say moth
ing of an immortal oul,--projects a fan
shaped, be-fringed, be-puckered basque
looking, for all the world, like spread tur
key-tai. On top of this projection a good
sized trunk could be comfortably seated; on
ly it might fall in! wonder ifa pappoosc
couldn't be inserted somewhere do so long
to blend the useful with the ornamental
Now, Hepsibah, you are a sensible married
woman, competent to give good advice anC
ask you what am l to do2 Go round thu
world in this harlequin guise, or give thu
whole thing great smash2 | should b.
glad to preserve a modicum Of self-respect
but how can l, inside of balloon?
l shall appear in full spread on Thursday
to spend the day. can't sit down; but
should like the loan of bed-post and cord
might go up you know. Till then in every
fiber of my stiffening Yours truly,
TIE GREAT EXPANDED.
l sat laughing over this; when in walket
Hester Graywood, another old friend Afte
the first sautation, she slowly twirled he
self round, and sank into a chair, exclaim
ing
"Behold the woman who dares :"
All! saw she, too, had on a new dress
1t was Of siver-gray silk, made with on
skirt, without particle of trimming on il
and a sacque just bound with bias fold O
the same. Yes, she had dared. 1t was re
ally refreshing sight, and she looked per
foctly bewitching in the Quaker-like costume
But, then, Hester Graywood is such prett
little creature, she can't help looking Lowell
in anything; and she knows it so it doe
not require so great courage in her to dare
Yes, she looked charming, Yet, on secon
glance, there seemed kind Of barenes
about her, as if something were wanting
Was this because had looked SO long o