The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1872-01-25
a MELTING STORY.
How a Vermonter Punished q But
feP-Thicf.


One winter evening q country
storekeepef in the Green Mountain
State was about closing up for the
night, and while standing in the
snow outside, putting up the win
dow shutters, saw through the glass
a louBging, worthless fellow within,
grab q pound. Of fresh butter from
the shell, and conceal it in his coat
The act was no sooner detected
than the revenge was hit upon. and
a very few minutes found the Green
Mountain storekeeper at once indul-
ging his appetite for fun to the full
lest extent, and paying of the theft
with facetious sort of torture, for
which he would have. gained a pre-
MUM from the old Inquisition.
'Isay, Seth, - said the storekeeper,
coming in aud closing the door after
him, slapping his hand over his
shoulders and stamping the snow
of his feet.
Seth had his hand on the door,
his hat on his head, and the roll Of
butter in his hat, anxious to make
his exit as soon as possible.
a say, Seth, sit down; 1 reckon
now on such cold night as this a
little something warm would not
hurt fellow"
Seth very uneertain; he had the
butter and was exceedingly anxious
to be of, but the temptation of
something warm sadly interfered
with his resolution to 60. This
hesitation was settled by the owner
of the butter taking Seth by the
shoulders and planting him in a seat
close to the stove, where he was in
such a manner coruered in by the
boxes and barrels that, while the
grocer stood before him, there was
no possibility Of getting out, and
right in this place, sure enough, the
.storekeeper sat down.
"Seth, we'll have a little warm
Santa Cruz said the Green Noun
tain grocer; so he opened the stove
door, and stuffed in as many sticks
as the place would admit; awithout
it you'd freeze going home such a
night as this
Seth already felt the butter set
ting down closer to his hair, and he
jumped up declaring ne must go.
"Not till you have something
warm, Seth; Seth, come. I've got a
story to tell you,' and Seth was
again rushed into his seat by his
cunning tornentor.
"Ohl it's so hot here" said the
petty thief. attempting to rise.
sSit down-don't be in such a
hurry" retorted the grocer, pushing
him back into his chair.
"But I've got the cows to fodder
and the wood to split, 1 must be
going" said the prosecuted chap.
''But you mustn't tear yourself
away, Seth, in this manner. Sit
down, let the COWS take care of
themselves, and keep yourself easy;
you appear to be little iidgety," !"
said the roguish grocer with a wick
ed leer.
The next thing was the produc-
tion Of two smoking glasses of hot
toddy, the very sight Of which, in
Seth's present situation, would have
made the hair stand erect upon his
head, had it not been well oiled and
kept down by the butter.
"Seth I viii give you toast, now,
and you can butter it yourself, said
the grocer, with an air of such con
,summate simplicity, that, poor Seth,
believed himself unsuspeeted. Seth,
here's-here's a Christmas goose,
well roasted, eh? I tell you its the
greatest thing in creation. And,
Seth, don't you never use hogs fat,
or common cooking butter to haste
it with; come take your butter-I
mean, Seth, take your toddy."
Poor Seth now began TO smoke, as
well as melt, and his mouth was her
meticaIly sealed up, as though he
had been born dumb. Streak after
streak Of butter came. pouring from
nnder his hat, and his handkerchief
was already soaked with the greasy
overflow. Talking away, as II moth
ing was the matter, the fun loving
grocer kept stufing wood into the
stove. while poor Seth sat upright,
with his back against the counter,
and his knees touching the red hot
furnace before.
Cold night, this" said the grocer,
''why, Seth, you seem to Perspire as
if you were warm? Why don't You
take your hat ofF2 Here, let me put
your hat away"
mo, exclaimed poor Seth, at last.
no, must go. let me cut, I amt
we'll; let me GO"
A greasy cataract was now pour
ing doWn the poor 1nan's Hace and
neck, and soaking into his clothes.
ard trinlzllng down his body saso his
boots. 50 be vas literally ina per-
feet bath Of oil. A H
swell. good night Seth, said the
humorous. Yermonter, .if sou will
go; and adding. as he started ont of
the door, 4 say. Seth, reckon the
fun have had out Of you Is worth
ninepence, SO I shan't charge you
for thatPound Of butter in yoar bat.
Hogr Ts Tf9