Delaware state journal. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1870-1883, 1872-12-21
CASE OF YOUNG BANGS.
The Misery Of Having Too Much Music
in Ones Vitals.



When Mr.. Bangs, the elder, returned
Europe, he brought with him from Geneva
miniature musical box, long and very
narrow, aud altogether of hardly greater
dimensions, say, than large pocket
knife. The instrument played four cheer
full little tunes for the benefit Of the Bangs
family, and they enjoyed ii 10 such an
extent that, one day, Just after the machine
had been wound up ready for action, be
got to sucking the end of il, and In a
moment of inadvcftence II slipped, and he
swallowed the whole concern. The only
immediate consequence Of the accident
was that a harmonic stomach-ache was
Immediately organized upon the interior
Of William Bangs, and he experienced a
restlessness which he well knew would
defy the soothing tendencies of peppermint
and make a mockery OF pa fegorlc.
But William Bangs kept his secret In his
own soul, and in his stomach also, deter
mined to hide his misery from his father,
and to spare the rod to the spoiled child
spoiled, at any rate, as far as his digestive
apparatus was concerned.
But that evening, at the supper tab e
W. Bangs bad eaten but one mouthful OF
bread when strains of wild, mysterious
music were suddenly waited from undc
the table. The entire family Immediately
groped around upon the door, trying
discover whence the sounds came, althOug
William Bangs sat there filled with ago y
aud remorse and bread and tunes, n d
desperately asserted his belief that the
music came from Mary Ann, who might
perhaps be playing upon the harp or III,
duleimer in the cellar. lie well knew tina
Mary Ann was unfamiliar with the harp
and that to her the dulemer was as much
an insolyabe problem as II would have
been to a tishing.worm he was aware
that Mary Ann would have scorned, under
any circumstance, TO evoke music while
sitting upon the refrigerator or reposing
| In the coa.bln. But he was frantic with
anxiety to hide his guilt. Thus IL is that
one crime leads to another.
But he could not disguise the truth for.
ever, and that very night, while the family
was At prayers, William Bangs all at once
got the hiccups, and the music box started
| of without warning with A Life on the
/ Ocean Wave and a Home on tue Rolling
[ Deep with variations. Whereupon the
l paternal Bangs arose from his knees and
grasred William kindly but firmly by his
| hair and shook him up and inquired what
/ he meant ny such conduct. And William
threw out kind of Il general idea to the
effect that he was prac.icing something
for Sunday School celebration, which
old Bangs intimated was u singularly thin
explanation. Then they tried TO get up
that music box, and every time they would
seize your William by the legs and shake
him over the sofa cushion, or would pour
some fresh variety of emetic down his
throat, the harmOnum within would give
! IA fresh mud fAvnrglAs grind
'' Listen to the MOckiug Bird, or "Thou'lt
Never Cease to Love" AT last they were
compelled to permit that musical box 10
remain within the sepulchral recesses OF
the epigastrium Of william Bangs. To Fay
that the unfortunate victim of the disaster
was made miserable by his condition
would be to express in the feeblest manneI
the state Of his mind. The more music
there was In his stomach, the wilder and
more completely chaotic became the dis.
cord in his soul just us likely as not il
would occur that while he lay asleep In
the middle of the night the melody work:
would begin to revolye, and would play
" Home. Sweet Home" for two or three
hours, unless the peg happened to slip
when the cylinder would switch back
again to A Life on the Ocean Wave ant
a Home on the Rolling Deep" and woult
railleou That tune with variations ana
fragments OF the scales until william
Bangs brother would kick him out Of
bed in wild despair and sit on him in a
vain ollort to subdne the screnade, which
however, Invariably proceeded with iiesl
yi2or when subjected TO unusual pressure
And wh'n william Bangs went 1,
church, it frequently occurred that, in tn,
very midst Of the most solemn portion o
the sermon, he would feel a gentle dis
turbance under the lower button of h
jacket and presently when everything
was hushed, the undigested engine woul
give a preliminary buzz, and then reel OF
Listen to the MOcking Bird" ana
Thoult Never Cease to Love" AZ,
scales and exercises, until the clergyma
would stop and glare at William over j i
spectacles. and whisper to one of the de-
cons. Then the sexton would sudden,
Itack up the aisle and clutch the unhapp
Mr.. Bangs by the collar, and send hin
down the aisle again to the accompani
ment Of " "A Life on the Ocean Wave an