Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1872-12-14
How 4 ESCAPED BEING KILLED IN
4 DsEL
BT MARK TWAIN.

FL kARk TWAIN.
The cnly merit / claim for the following mar
Tatlye II that 10 II true story. Ii has moral
az the enc OF II, but claim nothing on tn At as
~ j. merely thrown in TO curry favor with the re-
EgiOus clement.
After had reported couple of years on the
Niginia city Nevada Daily Enterprise, thew
promoted me 10 he editor in chiet-and lasted
IGst week, by the watch. But IN AIDE
commonly lively newspaper while did last, and
when retired had a duel on my hands. and
three horse whippiDss promised me. The latter
made 10 attempt to collect; however, this his
tory concerns only the former. IL was the old
''tUsh times" of the silver excitement, when
the population was wonderfully wild and
mixed, everybody went armed to the teeth, and
All sights and insults had 20 be atOred Tor with
the h,St article of blood your system could fur
Dish- In the course OF my editing made trouble
with Mr.. Lord. editor OF the rival paper.
lie lew NJ about some little trIiie or other that
4 said about him DO not remember now what
y was. l suppose 1 called him a thief,
toCN --natcher, or an idiot, something like
that was obliged 70 make the paper reada-
Bile, ana could not fail in nv duty to a whole
community OF subscribers merely 10 save the
exaggerated sensitiyencss Of a. individual. Mr..
IoTd was offended, and replied vigorously in
hls paper. Vigorously means a great deal
when 70 refers TO personal editorial in from.
tier Newspaper. Duelling was all the fashion
amcnS the upper classes in that country, and
very lew gentlemen would throw away OPP
poItUnIiy OF nghting one. 70 kill a person in
duel caused a man TO be even more looked up
To than "a Kill two men in the ordinary way
Well, ont there, IL you abused a man, and tha
Kill him; otherwise you would be disgraced.
So cha. enged Mr.. Lord, and 4 did hope he
would not accept; but / knew perfectly well
that ne DID not want to fight, and so chal-
leDged HIM in the most violent and implac able
manner. And then l sat down and suffered
and suffered till the answer came. All our
bOys-tEe edItOTs-Vere IN our Office, - helping
me ia the dismal business. aud telling about
Cuels, and discussing the code with q lot OF
aged Iu'hans who had experieHce in such things,
and altogether there was loving interest taken
IN the matter, which made me unspeakably
uncomfortable. The answer came-Mr. Lord
declined. Our boys were furious, and 80 was
I-OA the surface.
1 sent him another challenge, and another
and another; and the more he did not want To
night, the bloodthirstier became But at last
the mans tone changed lie appeared to be
waking up. twas becoming apparent that he
was going 10 fight me. after all. ought to have
ns1sr cd nTI h ene was man man who
eIultant- was not, though tried to be.
twas now time TO 60 out and practise. 1t
Was the custom there TO fight duels with navy
slS-shoOteTs at fifteen psces-load and empty
till the game for the funeral was secured. We
went 70 a little ravine Just outside OF town, aud
borrowed barn door for o target-borrowed il
nom a gentleman who was absent-aud we
stood this barn door up, and stood q rail on end
against the middle of IL, to represent Lord, and
put a squash on top OF the rail- to represent his
head. lie was a very tall, lean creature, the
IOcres. sort Of material Tor a duel nothing but
line shot could fetch" him, aud even then he
might split your bullet. Exaggeration aside,
the rail was OF course, a little too thin to rep,
resest his body accurately, but the squash was
AL night. II there was any Intellectual differ
enee between the squash and his head, il was in
favor Of the squash
Well. prscIised and pTactised At the barn
door, and could not hat it, and practised at the
rail, and could not hit that, and tried hard for
the squash, and could not hit the squash. 1
would have been entirely disheartened, but that
occasionally crippled one OF the boys, ald that
encouraged me TO hope.
At last We began TO hear pis.ol.shots near by,
an the next ravlne. We knew what that meant
The other party were out practising, too. Then
was m the last degree distressed; for OF course
those people would hear our shots, aud they
would -eEd spies over tie ridge, and the spies
would find my barn deor without q wound or q
scratch, and that would simply be the end of
me-fcr OF course that other man would imme
ciately become a. boodthirsty as was just
AT this moment a little bird, no larger than
sparrow, few by, and lit on a sage-bush about
thirty PAGES away; and my little second, Steve
ellis, who Wa "A matches msrksmsn with q
pistOl-much better than 1 was-snatched out
his revolver, and shot the birds head or We
all ran 10 pick up the game, and sure enou 2h f,
Just al this moment, some OF tbs other duelsts
Ss sm e. q over ts s, ts rdss They
and when they saw the bird, Lords second
said
That " Il a splendid shot. How far of was
it,
steve said, with some indifference:
sob. no great distance. About thirty PAGES f"
Thirty PAGES! Heavens alive, who do it!''
II he mischief he did Can he do that often?''
"Well-yes. He can do II about-well-About
four times out or five"
knew the little rascal was lying, but never
SAID anything. l never told him 50. He was
not OF a disposition 10 invite confidence OF that
KIND, 20 L let the matter rest. But IL was a
comfort 70 see those people look sick, and see
their uDter-jaws drop, wnen Steve made these
statements. They went of and got Lord, and
took him home; and when we got home, half al
hour later, there was a note saving Mr.. Lord
peIemPtOrily declined 10 hgat
IL was q narrow escape We found ont after
wards that Lord hit Ais mark thirteen times in
eighteen shots. In he had put those thirteen
bullets through me, IL would have narrowed INV
sphere OF usefulness q good deal would have
well nigh closed II, IN fact True. thew con A
have put pegs III the holes, and used me for A
hat-rSck; but what l. a hat-rsck TO q man who
feels he has intellectual powers? would scorn
such a Position.
have written this true incident of nv per-
sonsl history for one purpose, and one purpose
only-tc warn the youth OF the day against the
perniciOns practice OF dGelling, and to plead
with them - war against it. IL the remarks and
suggestions am making can be OF any service
70 SuHGiy-school teachers, and newspapers
interested IN the moral progress of society. they
are al liberty 20 use them. and sh all even be
gIatelut 10 have them widely disseminated, so
mat they may do a. much good as possible I
was Young and foolish when 1 challenged
mat gentleman, and I thought it was yery
nhe and very grand 70 be n duelIist
AND stand upon the Z" field OF honor" But 1
o. der AMI nj. ,,,