Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1872-01-11
Majors $ instructions implicitly.


Yes, Major it's me- said the unhap-
py Digby, rendered desperate by the
situation.
Then, sir, what the devil are YOU
doing inside my water-butt2'
Excuse me. Major-lm yerv sorry.
but It's quite an accident. | didn't
mean to do it. Let me out, and I'll
never get inside it again
'Ha! an idea strikes me-. gasped
the Major, as though overpowered by
the force off it. Amelia. this is your
doing. Go and shut yourself in the
drawlng-room directly, and do not quit
1t until give you leave
Don't be angry with her, Major. 1t
is all my fault-it is indeed.
'Coniound your impudencc, sir
lou admit as much, do YOU? Police
man, keep him there don't let him es-
cape. Hang it! rll-Ill murder him
Somebody give me my revolver and
Ill blow him 70 atoms.
oh, Major : cried poor Digby, spare
me, spare me- | had no idea of this.
stop him making that noise-wc
shall alarm the whole ncighborhood.
DIP his head under water, and give
him another ducking policeman.
l l. came the victim to the surface
again, putting and blowing.
Major, Major, spare me ! Think OF
my youth and inexperiencc. Don {
cut me off in my prime-but let me 90
this time and III promise you that Ill
never attempt such thing again. Oh.
Major, reilect--you were young man
once.
What sir : DO you mean to say that
| am an old man now
'Oh, no, Mgor-I don't say any,
thing of the kind. Quite the contrary.
MaJor--qultc the contrary.
Now, sir, III give Won one chance
Tor your life, and mind you speak the
truth. EquIvocatc in the slightest de-
gree and you are n dead man. Were
you not attempting to clopc with ms
daughter: Give him another dip, DO
llceman, 10 assist him to an answer.
1cs.-ycs, | was" biurted out poor
Digby, almost sutiocated by thi, I'M
mer,ion
'Oh, you precious scoundrc You
were, were YOU: Now, then, If | let
YOU 20 this time will you ever repeat
the attempt:
Never, Major-Nevcr. was tile CUR
gled out repiy
Never address another word TO nv
daughter, AMI never % much II took
at her again
Never, never again. Only let me
20 now.
Shall help hun out OF his bath I
asked the policeman.
'Aii ia good time, | haven't quite
done with him yet, was the reply.
Pray don't keep me here any longer,
Major, oT | shall catch my death OF
coid. IL - family Complaint ..,v
grandmother was subject To rhcumat-
les and ague'
'Confound your grandmother, sir !;
you should have thought Of that be-
fore. Listen! have one condition 10
propose-acccpt II and we will rescue
YOU from watery grave; refuse it,
and Ill put the lid back in its place
and sit upon it until you are suifoca
ted.
Name i, Major, for pity ) sake and
let me 90.
1t is tins. You must promise to
quit Your apartments next door early
tomorrow morning and never show
your conioundci phyaiognomy ii thi,
locality again for if | ever meet YOU
within two miles of my house I'll horse
whip you within An inch Of YOUR
life
And serve him right, sir. stnck in
the policeman
just 20. OfiiceE, YOU are i man Of
sound common sense and 4 credit to
tue Force. Now sir, your answer"
i Will agroe 10 anything, Major.
Very we'll Policeman help hi.n out
and let him go.'
After considerable excrlion on the
part OF the constable, poor Digby was
at length eXtricated from his uncom-
Portable quarters.
Now, sir, says the Major. 'Bcsone :
and never let me see Your face again.
Digby didn't wait 10 be told twice.
but immediately disappeard into the
adjoining garden
'lla.' ha. ha..' roared the Major
when Digby had departed. Its all
right Amelia; yon wont be troubled
by him again, I'll wager. Policeman,
step inside and have some brandy and
mind not a word Of this little affair
must be breathed TO anybody
Depend upon me, sir said the po-
iiceman. Not a syllable escapes my
lips
And he looked very solemn and
confidential as he spoke: but he told
the whole story to me the next dav
and no doubt TO everybody he knew
besides.