The Portland daily press., 1872-08-14
TERMS $500 PER ANNUM IN ADVANCE.

times day. He was terribly exhausted.
| fixed this by hevin small but intellectual
boy pirch hisself onto a post in the road
wlch leads to the house, with a signal flag.
When party, headed for the philosophers
mouse, makes its appearance, the boy waves
ms nag, and the great and coed Greeley
taxes on his coat and gets up a tree, wait
ing to be surprised at his yoosual avoca-
tlon, AT hrst he yossed to get down too
quick, to make it look natral but hev train
ed MN SO that he whacks away with a most
bland expression on his face, till call twice
or three times. To save walkin too far, dig
up tree and plant it near the house. One
will keep green for ten days, and when the
branches is cut Off we take out the naked
trunk and put another in its place.
hev, however, some trouble NV person.
al appearance is better soOted to the latitood
NV Kentucky than Moo York, and | hey to
wear hat without any rim to it, in the sun,
to account for the redness of my nose. Then
hev to meet so many kinds NV people. We
hev here the old abolishnist and the old
Democrat, wich are the hardest to manage.
Then comes the modified Democrat, who
accepts niger suffrage and sich, ef he kin be
ashOored the post-offis in his native village,
and the modified Republican who is willin to
swaller amnesty, and likewise to doubt wheth-
er universal suffrage wuz good thing after
all, provided he kin be ashOored NV the col
lector's offs wich Grant retooZed to give him,
and which is now held by a minyun and
and nepot In short we hev all shades here,
and it's bother to take care NV EN- all.
don't like mulatto babies, becoz every one NV
EN- is proof positive that there's bin adultery
somewhere. For the same reason l don't
like coalishun parties. They amt natral and
every one NV em bears the mark NV the sin
thro wich it come into the world. Ours is a
mule party, eff ther ever wuz one, and hearth
ly wish we wuz thro with it.
had fearful time Nv it yesterday. Our
picket guard waved his flag. Horris got up
his tree, and in moment there appeared
delegashun NV Moo Workers escortin dele
gashun NV Southemers. l took EN- out under
the tree, Horris come down, and we went to
the house and commenst immejitly discussin
the questions NV the day. The Moo Workers
wuz importers and consistently free traders,
and the Southerners wuz free traders NV
course. The great and good Greeley wuZ
ekal to the emergency. He did not deny that
at various periods Nv his life he he'd leaned
somewhat to the doctrine NV perteckshun.
What his views were now on this important
subjeck he would not at this time state, that
is, in full BY reference to his letter, 1t wood
be seen that all such miner questions he'd
been left to the people. Ell the people want.
ed free trade, free trade they shoOd hey. III
the people wanted perteckshen, while his
tion, he shoOd-
At this pint interrupted him. My bOrri-
fled vision saw that internal flag wavin. Hor-
| ris started for his tree from sheer force NV
| habit but | checked him and went out my
self to meet them. 1 wuz not long left in
suspense ez to who they wuz. They wuz
manufacturers from MassychoOsetts! Here
| wuZ fix. Southerners and Moo York inn
port-rs, and Moo England manufacturers, all
| callin ON a presidenshul candidate to wunst!
| 1t wuz too late to git Greeley out Nv the way,
| and there was no way but to let them come
| together and trust to luck. l interdoost EN-
and stood by to see the result Poor Horris
saw the fix he was in, and perspired.
The Moo Englanders opened by direct
reference to the tariff question, when throwd
| myself into the breach. REMARKED that this
| wuz no time to teteh questions NV so little mo-
| ment-that all these matters he'd bin left to
| the people, who wuz entirely competent
to say what they wantid-that our principle
| biZness wuz to clasp hands across the bloody
chasms, that reconciliation and brotherly feel
| in was our best holt-that wat every patriot
most desired wuz to see the flag OF our com
mon country, without star missin, agln
| floatin in the breeze, and that eff any gentle
| man desired to see to what pertecshen the
next president he'd brought turnip eultur,
shood be pleased to show them over the farm,
and quaff with them the coolin waters uv
the spring wich he'd become ez famous, al
most, ez the spool of Bethesda"
One of the Moo Englanders remarked that
the flag was all very well-the turnips wuz
all very well, and that the spring was very
pool of Bethesda, for all the halt and blind,
| and them with sores, congregated there, but
| wat he wanted to know about wuz the tariff
on cotton goods.
Here, thought l, is trouble, but there
| wusn't. At this critikle moment, the great
and good Greeley wuz so overcome with the
heat that he tainted and fell f'Om his chair,
! wich i, with ekal presence of mind seized
him and toted him to his room. Ez | laid
him on his bed, his childlike face wuz illumin-
| ated with the segestiOn NV smile, ez he re-
markt, "Git EN- out, d-n EN-, ez quick ez
yoO kim"
hev loved Horris Greeley from that
| minnit.
To avoid the constant danger Nv two par
| ties, NV somewhat different views, comm to
wunst, immejtly he'd the house at Chappa-
qua altered according to this plan: