American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1872-01-27
Hints on Family Government.

OF all mOnStfOSltleS pattern chllu--a
child with all the childhood left outs
the worst.
OF course, most parents would be glad
to see their children violate none of tho
pruprieties of life, if the little ones would
take naturally to such delightful course,
but this way of constantly reminding, re
proving, and rebuking is sure to spoil a
child Better far let many tritles 90 un
noticed, annoying though they may be,
than sour the natural disposition, and
send your child as far and keep him as
long from his home as possible, lest at
the instant of his coming some unfortu,
nate habit shall call out fresh remon,
STRANGE.
These faults of manner will cure them
selves little later Save rebuke for
graver errors, for real faults ; and in all
things, if possible, rin to a better way.
Love first-sternness when that fails.
Many parents would give worlds to re
call the early lives of their children, the
lost opportunity to tenderly guide their
ways. The Infinite Father must look
down with pity on the little children of
this world. The mistakes Of their train.
ing develop such strangely different char,
acters from what they might have made !!
| am not thinking now Of rough and un-
cultured homes, or children of no homes
at all. Poor little waits of humanity !!
They struggle on as best they can through
an unloved childhood into an unlOved and
unlovely manhood and womanhOod. But
of homes where children are brought up
according to the good old standard. 1t
all sounds very well, and for some char
acters, both of parents and children, may
work eXcelently well. In the parent,
success in such training requires rare
combination OF gcntleness and tirmness,
and few, very few, have it. A style of
training without this combination has
sent many a fine, impulsive nature head
long to ruin.
! have been an interested observer, and
often M indignant one, of this matter of
family government And | have often
seen families turn out exactly the reverse
of what wiseacres foretod. Children
who certainly were any thing but models
of obedience became charming men and
women, loving most tenderly and rever-
encing the mother who led them by love
rather than authority. Others who were
even in childhood, broke away from
every restraint in early manhood, and
brought nothing but grief and sorrow to
those who had trained them SO carefully.
In the best governed families that I
have known there has been no blind hold
ing up of parental authority. This can
never invite confidence. OF course, obe-
lience has been required at the same
time it has been won more by the loving
of the parent than by coercion.
All children can not be held to the same
standard or governed by the same rules
What might strengthen one would crush
,ut all individuality in another. Parents
leed more to study the characters of
heir children, and vary their treatment
accordingly.
A bed Of portulacas in our garden
waits for the broad glare of sunshine be-
ore the petals deign to unclose. Just in
he rear of these stands an old dead |
pricot-tree, transformed by few judi
ious strokes of the hatchet into rustic |
Iower-stand. This is twined and inter"
wined with morning glories and other
ines, twisting in and out and around the |
atural framework, and i'll the early
lorning the whole thing, from the ground |
o the tOpmost branch, is wreathed and |
with blossoms. Stretching
yer every arm, bending over and half
iding the basket of greenhouse plants
nat is sheltered in one of the notcheS of
ne tree, and having covered all available
pace, they hang out their graceful tendrils
lto the air, mingling pure white with
lany shades of pink and blue and purple
lessons. The delicate, fragile bells
rect the first flush of day, and opening
ing before the tardY sleepers Of the
ouse have opened their eyes, they bios
I'm with a prodigal wealth of beauty,
ut all this beauty is short-lived for
efore ten o'clock they hide from the
irish light and close their bells, while
Ie portulacas have only waited for that
cry glare to wake them into Il blaze of
ory.
But this has been gala day for the
)nvolvuluses. Clouds and showers have
ven them a new lease of life, and nearly
| day have the beautiful, delicate bios
ms gladdened our eyes, while in fit Of
e sullSs their low-bon neighbors have
Duted the livelong day, never unclosing
petal, but shutting their blossoms as !
Osely as some people do their hearts
,ainst all Gods other blessings, because
ey can not have just the particular one
ey want
You cannot compel the two to blossom
lder the same conditions. There is a
dical difference in their natures, and
,wcr nature will not be bound by arbi.
ary rules Neither ought child nature
be cramped and tortured into adverse ,
ays. Give it free development Around
c wise, strong, loving heart of the
trent let 1t climb in happy freedom, |
rowing out its tendrils, clinging fear !
ssly, and so strongly that nothing can ,
ar it away from its happy, loving union. :
l certainly have fallen from the faith in :
e matter of old orthodox family gov I,
Between that and the dreadful !
xness of discipline that has given !
oung America such bad pre-eminence, !
ere is golden mean, if we only can :
{ it,-HedrM and Home. :