The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1872-12-21

unfamiliar with the harp, and that to
her the dulcimer was US much dn in
solvable problem as it would have been
to q fishing worm; and he was aware
that Mary Ann would have scorned,
under any circumstances, to evoke music
while sitting upon the refrigerator or
rcposing in the oalbin But lie was
frantic with anxiety to hide his guilt.
Thus it is that one crime leads to
another
But he could not Disguise the truth
forever, and that very night, while the
family was at prayers, William Bangs
all at once got the hiccups, and the
music box started off without warning
with GA Life OH the Ocean Wave and q
Home on the Rolling Deep" with
variations. Whcreupon the spatcrnal
Bangs arose from his knees aud grasped
William kindly but firmly by his hair
and shook him up, and inquired what
he meant by such conduct. And Will
lian threw cut Kind Of general idea
to the effect chat he vas practicing
something for Sunday school celebra-
ton, which old Bangs intimaied was a
singularly thin explanation.
Then they tried to get up that music.
box, and every time they would seize
young William BY 1.-The legs and shake
him over the sofa Cushion; or would
throw some fresh variety of emetic down
his throat, the harmonium within would
give fresh squirt an i joyously grind
out "Listen to the Mockiug, Bird" or
"Thoult Never Cease to Love"
so they abandoned the attempt, and
were compelled to permit the musical.
box to renaiu. within the sepulchra!
recesses of the cpigastrium of William
Bangs. To say that the unfortunate
victim of the disaster was made miser.
able by his condition, would be to ex.
press in the feeblest manner the state of
his mind. The more music there was in
his stomach the wilder and more edm
l'pictoiy s'saosis ''eera,s tl,e a;aeSSrl in.
his soul.
Just us likely as not it would occur
that while he lay asleep in bed in the
middle of the night the melody works
within would begin to rovolve, and would
play "Home, Sweet Home" for two or
three hours, unless the peg happened tto
slip, when the cylinder would slip back
again TO "LiIe on the the Ocean Wave
and Home on the Rolling Deep" and
would rattle out that tune with varia
tions and fragments of the scales until
William Bangs brother would kick him
out OF bed in Wild despair, and SIT ON.
him in vain effort TO subdue the sere.
nado, which, however, Invariably pro.
ceeded with fresh vigor when subjected
to unusual pressure
And when William Bangs went to
church it frequently occurred that, in
the very midst Of the most solemn por.
tion Of the sermon, he would 4eol a
gentle disturbance under the lowest but.
ton of his jacket; and presently, when
everything was hushcd, the undigested
engine would give preliminary buzz,
and then reel off "Listcn to the Mock
ing Bird" and "Thoult Never Cease to
Love-" and scales and exercises, until
the clergyman Ewould stop and glare at
William over his spectaclcs, and whisper
to one of the deacons. Then the sexton
would suddenly take up the aisle and
clutch the unhappy Mr.. Bangs by the
collar, and scud down the aisle again to
tho accompaniment of ga Life on the
Ocean Wave and Home on tho Rolling
Deep" aud then incarcerate William in
the upper portion OF the steeple until
after church
But the end came at last, and the
miserable offspring of the senior Bangs
found peace. One day, whilo. he was
sitting in theschoot endeavoring to learn
his modification table to the tune of
"Home Sweet Home" his gastric juice
triumphcd:: Sorsething or other in the
music-box gave way ali at once, the
springs were unrolled with alarming force,
and William Bangs, as he felt the frag-
ments of the instrument hurled right and
lett among his vitials, tumbling over the
floor and exirped-
AT the Postmortom examination they
found several pieces of "Home, Sweet
Homo" N mis- liver, while ono of his
lungs was severely torn by fragment
of"A Life on the Ocean Wavc," Small