The Elk County advocate. [volume] (Ridgway, Pa.) 1868-1883, 1872-03-14
Facts and Figures.

|
A blushing bride at North Platte
handed her marriage certificate to the
conductor, instead of her ticket, and was
Mortified to hear the announcement that
it wasn't good.
| Cleveland oil refineries in the winter
run their refuse oil under the ice in the
harbor. The Plaindealer placidly re-
marks " that is why the lake water tastes
so badly now."
A firm of button makers in Birming-
ham, England, surprised their workmen
New Years Day by dividing among
them proportion of the profits of their
business. The amounts ranged from e1
to GA per head.
A little four-year-old of Bristol went
to Providence the other day, and in the
depot was accosted by Quaker lady,
who asked, "How old art thou, little
girl?" She looked up in the face of the
Quakeress and replied: "Tm not art
thou-Tm little Jennie"
By the death of a rich uncle in New
Orleans, Miss Nellie Mellon, lately en-
ployed in a millinery shop in East Sagi-
nav, Mich, has fallen heiress to O for
tune of 100000. Miss Mellon for sew
eral years has supported her widowed
mother by her own exertions.
A Sheboygan wisconsin, woman en-
tered saloon the other evening where
her husband was carousing, and after
expostulating with broomstick to the
barkeeper and two or three other men
in the place, soundly whaled her hus-
band, and then led him home by the
collar.
The Chicago Times says of the stringent
law recently enacted by the Legislature
of Illinois: "Its nice law, this new
temperance statute. You can get
drunk, larrup your wife and knock
smithereens out of the furniture, and
then make the man who sold you the
virus pay all the damage"
A firm in Sheffield, England, has Just
succeeded in rolling the largest armor
plates ever made. The plates are in
tended to protect the turrets of the great
war ship Devastation, which is being
built at Portsmouth. Each plate weighs
twenty-four tons and measures twenty
feet in length, nine feet in BREADTH and
eight inches IN thickness.
The most remarkable achievement in
surgery which we have seen recorded of
late was that of the Delaware wood
chopper who cut off two of his toes and
carried them several miles in his pocket,
and then had them tied on again. If
the story be true the severed members
grew firmly to the stumps, leaving only
a slight scar, and are now as useful and
ornamental as ever.
There is French astronomer, Planta-
mour by name, who has conjured up
terrible comet that is to strike this earth
on the 18th of August next, and knock
it utterly out of time. We are truly
sorry for this for we had some cherished
plans that we cannot possibly carry out
before that time. However, it occurs to
us that we have heard of this direful
chimera before, and that it has failed to
keep one or more appointments for ex-
tinguishing this globe We shall cher
ish the hope that it will prove intracta
BILE this time, and that Plantamour can
not induce it to work out his malignant
purpose.
The Chicago Posts Plains correspon-
dent writes: 81 never saw so many
Indians in my life. l should think there
were million at least. L won't take
off an Indian though several of them
will get taken off before spring if
General Palmer moves westward. They
are dressed mostly in blankets and bears
grease. They are confding people.
Yesterday a squad of thirteen came into
our tent, and the Oldest availed himself
of the right of seniority by sitting down
on our hot box-stove, which he mistook
for valise. He was very much surpris-
ed, and the quartermaster has been is
suing laudanum poultices ever since.
In Texas lively competition seems
to be going on in the production of
weighty infants. Waco County first put
in claim for the championship because
it could show baby eight months old
that weighed thirty pounds, whereupon
, Montgomery County came forward with
a promising fellow only six months
old who weighed thirty-fve pounds.
"Pooh !" says Robertson County, those
, babies are well enough, but Mrs. DR..
} Poole, of this place, has baby that
weighs thirty-nine pounds at six months
old" The other counties have not been
, heard from, but we presume the finest
!; specimens of elephantine babyhood still
"blush unseen"
The Pure Milk Movement is still kept
up in Boston. Before private meeting
of ladies and gentlemen recently held to
consider the subject, the Rev. E. E. Hale
stated land he is perfectly responsible
for his statements) that the middlemen
or contractors do what they please with
the milk before it reaches the consumer;
that they do please, in the first place, to
take off all the cream; that they add
water and mixture of burnt sugar to
give color, and then of salt and plain
, sugar to rectify the favor that the pop
ular taste has become so perverted that
this vile mess is preferred to the genuine
fluid that this spurious milk causes a
fearful mortality among children. Mrs.
Caroline III. Dali submitted report
from subcommittee, setting forth an
! alarming mortality among the young
from the use of impure milk, and stating
that the profit of the contractors was
nearly 100 per cent. DIR. Jarvis corrobo-
0 rated former statements regarding the
r infant mortality. The Rev. Mr.. Angler
Y cited the example of two families in
d New York, both known to him, one Of
/; which was fed upon pure and the other
t upon adulterated milk. The member.
/, of the first "were manly, healthy, robust
h happy" and those of the other .sthin
It dyspeptic, cadaverous." The plan adopt
IS ed by the meeting is to buy milk direct
a | lv of the Droducera fo ha ouD,,1;od ro<.