davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

y Yankee in Texas, who sat listea-
ing 10 the stories Of a Louisianian in
regard to the marvellous growth OF
su gar cane on his plantation, near
New Orleans, finally said THAT amt
nothing. pve seen cane in old New
England mOre'n a mile longm "N Lat
kind of cane was ?n was the gen.
eral inquiry. "a huTricane?n was
answered the triumphant Yankee.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
A. A. FnEYMAN. Il. o.

DHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, Southwest
corner OF Market ami jefferson streets
opposite the Episcopal church, ofilce "a door
on ,efiersOn street, soliclts ana hopes 70
merit q liberal patronage, having TIE ad-
van ate OF hueen years experience ia last
ern r'ennsylvania and over three years IN
TlrIin, and being familiar with The English
and German languages. Special attendance
given 70 surgery 4 diseases OF women ahQ
Childre Medicine furnished when desired
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
sCUDDER CIIAs1EERLAIN

4 RCHITECT AND GENERAL BUILD
~ ER, viii take contracts for putting mp
Blocks, Dwellings, etc, or will oversee Sucii
work. Drawings, Drafts, Plans, etc, for ey-
cry description made and furnished on low
terms. Residence, No. ld2 Washington -,
Tlfin, O.
Jan. 7th, le70.-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

DRUGGIST, Bloomville, Ohio, keeps on
IL hand 81 full assortment Of Drugs ana
Medicine, etc. VIII attend to all profession
~ calls promptly. Has had an experience
Of fifteen years IN the practice OF medicine.
Dec. 10, lSIL-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
RTEWAET.

T OCKSMITH & CUTLER, repairs locks,
Ia clocks, Sewing Machines, Trunks, Um-
brellas, &C. GriDds Surgeons instruments,
razors, knives, shears, and all kinds Of small
edged tools. All work attended 10 prompt
iy aud satisfaction guaranteed.
National Hail Block, under Marquaret' 5
Drug Store, Thin. o.
Mar. g. 1S7l-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TrORNEY AND COUNSELLOR At
"A LAW, and Interpreter in the German,
French and Italian languagss before the
civil and criminal Courts o. ne Stale 4
close study and application O. these and
other languages. IN a. EojOuru Cf i've years
in France, Germany, SYitzeri md, ltaiy1
Greece, Syria, Palestine, Turkey proper ana
England, will, Il is believed, the better rec
0mmend him IN this branch OF ais profes-
sion. ONCE with DR.. Crawford.
Feb. "a.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
Card TO the Ladies.
5r. DB7OacO's Golden seri0dlcal Pills
FOR FEMALES.

Insaiiibie IN Correcting IrFegulaElsfS
Removing ObstFuetiOus 81 the
1foufhly PeFfoo.. from
Whatever EauNe.
rsley rss. - fiii, and may 0e dsprndcE up
"a IL. eve = case where the monthly dOR has
Jeen Oasslris-fed through cold or dlsea>e. UU-
PJNtiJ'5 GOLDES PILLS asWays give IN
aedsare relief, being especially prepared for
uarried ladies. A lady writes. Dup0nco's
Golden Pills relieved me 10 one day, Without
lncony5nience Ike magic
IHE GENUINE
are now p-Is ~ u LARGE (WHfTE) BOXES
sontaiuin - = ubleqCantitt Of Piils.S nd up
IN each 3 - GOT VII nnd the Rsreftue
Stan1y, and ~ words. DLFDNCD'S GDLD-
IN PERl-Ds.'AL PILLS. In Whffe LsEters,
wifhor rnet NJNE ABE GENUINE
REE-E--als the Genlffls'' are In W1As
noXuz-
Fum and explicit directions accompany
each box Price 81. Per box, six boxes s.
@oid By on : uZgist In every town, village,
slty ai-J 3 t-I-c- throughout the world sold
10 7 ~ - ]. z. MARQUARDT. sole Az,t.
L lbit-t y sending hful 81 70 tie I1mn
Posi- 's.lce, can have the Pills sent conn
denrialiys bU nlGtl % GaV part q lls COUNTRY
box Il signed g D. HOWE
M en- Sole Proprietor, SeW YORK
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A minister once asked a tipsy fellow
leaning up against fence, where he
expected to 20 when he died. "If 1
can't get along any better than 1 can
now" he SAID, 4 shan't go any
where"
moo, my good bairns," said a
schOolmaster to his class, "there's
Just another instance of the uncer-
t,linty o human lie; and o. your ain
scuiemates-a fine wee bit lassie went
10 her bed hale and weei at NIGHT,
and rose a corpse in the morning"
And now, that frugal housekeepers
are getting their soap grease scraps TO-
geUEer, and fixing up Teaches" it is
about time to start those stanZas OF
'.William Cullen's" on their annual
round:
Those melancholy days have come,
The worst o. al the year;
When women jaw and make soft soap,
And the old man takes his clear"
Ro5us Smith, brother Of Sydney,
was also u wit. he was Il lawyer, anu
ex-Advocate General, ana happened
10 be engaged in argument with an
eminent physician touching the mer-
its Of their respected prOfessIOns.-
s'YOu must admit" urged the Doctor,
that your profession does not make
angels of men" "NO," was the re-
lorT, "there you have the best of it;
yours certainly gives them the first
chance"
\ Nebraskiaa has inverted 4 pow
eTfui, doUbie-action save, which
shows power never bef0' exhibited
by a salve of any kind. The inYeutOr
accidentally cut of the tail of q tame
wolf, and Immediately applying some
of the salve to the stump, new tail
grew out. Then picking up the old
tail, he applied some OF the salve to
the raw end OF that, and n new wolf
grew out; but lie was a wild wolf aud
had to be shot.
Medford and New Bedford, Mass,
although their names rhyme, occas-
sionally don't quite harmonic, as
witness the following. The Medford
editor perpetrates this:
There wasa fair maiden OF Medford,
Who was "smashed" on n youth in New
Bedford;
But he smeit 50 OfOil,
That his suit II did spoil
OIeaginous chap OF New Bedford.
To which a New Bedford editor re-
spends:
There was g dne lad in New Bedford,
Fell in love with lady in Medford;
But she smelt so Of rum,
He was quite overcome,
This prohibitory youth ofNew Bedford.
A douce Seotehman, jamie, belong
ing to a Scotch burglI, and who did
ANYTHING for an honest living, was
noted for his ready wit. On one oc-
crsiOn lie was sent as droveT 10 Car
Isle market, and as he was passing
through the town, his tTusty dog bolt
ed into a butcher shop and made off
with q leg Of mutton, wnereup9n the
butcher Immediately gave chase, and
colIared jamie, demanding at the
same time, whether or not the dog
was his. Jamie, nothing dauntet,
turned around and surveyed lis
friend, the dog, and then looking the
EnClishman full in the face, said
/ "Oi, he was once niue but he seems
to be daein' for himsc' moo"
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A RCHrTECT, THIN. o. Plans and Specif-
a cations for buildings or ali kinds FUR
nished in the best style and NJ reasonable
prices. Orders LEFT with Adams & Letterhas
or addressed by mail viii receive prompt
attention. Mar. H-lyr.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

NOTARY PUBLIC and Dealer IN Books,
~ Periodicals and Stationery. Cider Vim
egar on hand South Of Court House, Mark
ct street, Tifdn.
oct. &c. lS7l.-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

DROCURE American and Foreign Patents,
furnish Models and Drawings, ncgoti-
ate sales OF Patents, etc. Special attention
10 the purchase and sale Of Real Estate, ex-
ecufsng Deeds and Mortgage, perfecting
and making abstract OF Titlez- Al tiie Re-
corder's once, Titin, ..
Ocf 1f 1Es1 IF
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
CHARLES sOwER,

~ FNERAL Insurance, Real Estnte and
fT Collecting Agent. Life, Health and
Accident, ard Fire Insurance. Special a.
Fef Street, over HRrtman's Jewelry Store
Secord Floor, Tim, ..
Nav. I6la7Q-lyT.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
IL CnoNrsE. 81. d..

OFFERS his professional services 70 the
people of Tiffin aid vicinity. Oiiice on
Market street. opposite Fiege's Furniture
Store.
Nov. 9. 1874.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

JUSTICE OF THE PEACE, Republic, o
81 Collections promptly attended 70. Deeds
and MORTGAGES executed. Fire and Life In
surance effected in flfst-class companies.-
once in Town Hail, front room, on the left
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A Connecticut man is engaged in
working up a saw log thirty feet long
into fife for GilmOre's jubilee. 1t
viii be blowed by nitro-glycerine, says
the Norwich Bulletin, and that paper
Is authority on all such subjects.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
NEIL HOUSE.

OPPOSITE the State House, Columbus, O.,
" Walstein Failing, Proprietor. This old
and fRYOrite Hotel reduced its price per
day to s. 90 on January 1, lSsl.
January 5, lS7L-nE-tL
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
EIHVALIDs DON'T DESPAIR

tss1ss9 rhcu~aUds have found relief and
-huusa .ds will turn 20 this Medf-
- tcines after exhausting their purSes
iuG plsIlsnce In search OF health. 0iddiness
Jf the heal duilness OF the mind. fOstid
breath, coated tongue loss Ofappetite, pains
aud weakness IN he stomach. enlGfgC sent
u the liver, yrsiiOwness @ the skin, cOnsi ant
ever ana thirst, with a total dlsreliSh for
business. pleasure Or any kind Of employ
d-nL fAHKNEY's PAEACEA iffaken ana
preserved IN for u lev days. viii remove this
whole class OF sym ptOms. The fluids OF The
AJdy necOTue pure, and mind clear. TIE
'JOfnGci. strengthened the tongue clean,
-tUEetite improved. and the whole system g..
Jencdfed t6at disease, IN bad weather, Is
'ass l.a,s.-- n a =. ct you.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

a female student, says the y. Y.
World, in Michigan University is said
to saw far more wood than any Of her
male associates. It need scarcely be
added that she is in the szw-far-mOre
class.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
wILLIAn cnAwFoRp. y. D.

hALLAA1A - O1sA - = oA~Ds 81 ~
ECLECTIC PHYSICIAN AND SURGEOS,
II ofIlce IN Empire Block, over Weirick
q sons store. Thankful for patronage dur
ing the past three years, and VIII continue
10 serve the public in all branches ol the
Medical Profession. Residence, - Ward
River side.
Nov. l6, lS7l.-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
aAIR E.4i7liATITE |

TRANSPARENCY md clear as crystal, it will
not soil the finest fabric-perIectly SAFE,
CLEAN, and EFFICIEN1-desiderat
LONG SOUGHT FOR AND FOUND AT
LAST
Il rs~tI.e- aud prevents the Hair from be-
con -ag gray ifuparts soft, glossy appear
lnccr -c4nOVes DAndIud. Is cool and refrssh-
ing 10 the head, checks the Hair from ALL
ing On, and restores It TO a great extent when
preiuaturelOst, prevents Headaches, cures
ali h1inOrs, cUtaneous eruptlons, and un-
natural heat. AS A DRESSING Fur THE
II IR II Is THE BEST ARTICLE IN THE
MAE--Lsr.
Or. q. smith, Patenlee. Aver, Mass. Pre-
pas ed ouy b. Proctor Brothers, Gloucester,
h-asa- he genuine - putup u a panel bot
Gle, made expressly for Il. With the name OF
tue articlr, blown In the glass. Ask your
Druggist for NATURES HAIR REsr0RAT TIVE,
and lake no other.
S6- send two thrts - . stamps 10 Proctor
brothers for Il. c4,siSr on the Human
uair.H The Information II contains Is worth
$50, ,JGO 20 any persOL.
au, a.
July l3, is7L-ns9-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

III SURGEON, Tim, Ohio. Office hour
rom 10 10 A. ~, and from 2 70 3 +. n.
Saturdays from 10 a. Al. to 7. M- once on
Market street, - door east OF ihe n: T..
ehurch. lApril n.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
q. !. KEY.

A TTOREEY AT Law, Notary Public
"a Real Estate, Claim, aud General lusug-
sncs Agent, 1lIin, Ohio. once in Grun-
meL's Block opposite the First National
hank.
Iunp IL
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
VII rROwN. n. D..

nHYsICiAN AND SURGEON. onlce in
Finchs Block, over Benefits drug
Store, Green Springs, Ohio.
lime Y. Is7l.-tv.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

IHAsHIoNA lsi4s BARBERS. Shop under
u Geo. r. huSs' Book store, Timn, ONO
Everything 1s., clean, and t0eis sharp.
April -, Ia.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
DENTISTS.


gURGEON DENTIST. Oaaeo az his resi-
y dence, corner Monroe and Madison
Ireets, opposite German Reformed Church.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

GEO. SHALL.

C,AKPENTER AND JOINER. VIII take
- Contracts 10 erect any kina Of build
lngs.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

nHYgICIAN AND SURGEON. Office
over Hartmanis Jewelry store, next 10
Post office, Tifiin, Ohio. Residence No. 3
Clay street, Third Ward.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
MEDICAL.
DIR. q. Z. SWAN.


HOMEOPATHIsT Office nnd Residence
Id INST door Wesi OF tiIe Shawi.an House,
hnin, Ohio.
Api. ll, 1872.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

n II zr0yER.

fSHYsICIAN AND SURGEON. once
in Empire BlOck Washington street
Iinlns Ohio.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TTORNEY AT Law. Special atien
a ton given 70 al kinds Of Military
Clains, Back pay, Bounty, Pensions &C.
Office n National Exchange Bank hlocks
opposite the Court House, THIN, Ohio
Jan. u.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A. $. ROsEEEERGER, N. D.,
MUNICIPALITIES, Carey, Ohio, VIII
III promptly attend 10 an professional
calls.
Jan. &c, ls7l-tf
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

HOMEOPATHIC PHYSICIAN and Sur
IL geon. Office in ILirchner's Block ,ovel
VOLTS Shoe Store, McllzS-ly.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
Dy. =. FAHRNEY,~
Celebrated
Blood Cleanser OF Panacsa,

A a med dlcf1e for ehiIdren, tie Psnacea .
every Wsv. calculated % axe The place oi
~ endless variety o. esues which are an
..usily sold for mat Purys-ss. ano which are
tfieu veTp tuiuriuus. A meoicfne which
Iossesses thG 4uaiitie, Of a eaLhartlc a. we'll
- n mild Alternative, and which IS ca apable Of
trreSJilg q s-ass Withour ne feast injury to
the child. Is Of incalculabie vaiue % every
mother. AS a cat hartgc, lf J. very effective,
sst 70 does not, Il gwen IN proper quapfliies,
stuse narsea or distress 10 the stnmach or
loWeis. II II wy pleasant 70 the iaste,
which - . yer m oftant fssrure mcGi-
'4a3 Tor ehiidse-.- A 4 prsrr1sttUe - dis ase
+ unprecedented. a. o. irt disfciiy upan
NJ digestive Organs and re hiOor. l.. all
1rofu Ous disease-, 90 j. the mo-i n ctiy
neficine ever offered 70 the pubiid and
X given regular and DsrseveIin0iy those
.ruptige . .use 50 common 20 children may
- entirely -rad Gated.
Prepared by P. Fah~ueyls Bros. q Co
WaynesbOFo, ,Pa =. p. Pa a r. -
NEH 81 Mort Ire -. = -, Chit ~
saao- Prfcs g Des bOtsles fuI ~
-aisby Who es-lIs .ke. d dealer
Dee., Z, lslI-0ll.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
VaIlllIa Farm For Sale |

THE FIsFR FARM, s ufIes south Of THIN,
4 coutailf1g 100 acres, I'D Of which ara IA
alii gh statc Ct cultivation, baianc, good TIM
Der Is odsle.i fJr sale for 4 rIn. and other
tnforfoati0n- addrees II. 81. @ User, Eapol-
ecn o., or call On John Borof, on adjoining
lErm.
Feb. z.sam.e
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
SCHOOL EXAMINERS Notice
TO FEACHERS:

rsrtFE school ELaui1.4e - OF seneca County
LII examiEe ts-sehers, az the High
sAs,ef Room, In tEs First Ward Union
.5-l,ooI Building, In TIN.
71jlIG on he last Saturday OF each month, also
o.
September Is, 1871,
october 4,
November II.
March l8. ls72,
April Is,
Nay u.
ADoIicaats vii De required 70 be present
= IstrIy - Co O'Clock on the day Of examin-
iln, Or they Nill not - examined.
No certificate vii - dated back ana none
sill be granted except on examination day
re1teferr are requested 1Ot 20 apply for cer-
1deztes on any other day.
Eseh applicant VII b required 70 leave
vita ine Examiners a stamped ervelops ad-
b ,. NYEss, Clerk Of the Board.
SEPT IS ?
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TTORNEYs AT Law. Clce over
a Brown schlosser,& Cos store, oppo-
site MAYORS Hard ware store " .nftqu
street, Tlfiln, Ohio NOV j.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TrOKNEY AND COUEsELLOR Al
"A LAW and Solicitor IN Chancerg; and
General Insurance Agent. Attention given
10 prosecuting cififnsr settling estates, max
ing collections and securing patents. Odice
IN National Exchange Block 1ifin, Ohio.
Jan. ], 't9.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
ATTORNEYS.


A TTOREEF AT LAW, Office second floor
y Nat. Exchange Bank Block corner
Washington and Market s.. 1iar. lily
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
InHN rIeCAuIEY.

A rTORNEY AT Law, Tim, Ohio. Of
"a ice opposite the Court House.
3 June 10.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TTORNEY AT Law. once In Grum-
a melI's new block. nearly opposite FIFet
NaffOUai BanE, Iinin, Ohio.
April L. ISL
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TTORNEY AT Law, Thin, Ohio. once
- corner Main and Perry streets.
Nays.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

A TTORNEYE AT Law, THIN, Ohio. Of
n nee No. 80, Washington street
Gfr. 80, 1871.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
The Indians dream.

When the Indian went to see the
white man he stayed all night. In
the morning he says to the white
man.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

~
= with loss Ofappetfts az
la. -cueral cOseiTe, ~ome
Fita lax The head Is tri
nd dull, heavy sensation
T memory, accompanies
anon OF having len q
= 1icl ought 70 have been
saesGins Of weakness, deb
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
:. Fanstty Prtae.. Cottaae.
NO. So WASHINGTON srRExr.

And the NINETY otne- styles snd si-as. 4
you want 70 see what IS mAnufss stur,.fi n
PORT HOME INDUSTRY.
Yours, Truly.
". o. SPAYTH, Sec'y.
November y. tss9-tf
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

many ofthe aeoVe
.symDtoms attend
'the disease, and ~
other times very
few OF themf : but
The liver Is EeDer-
q lly the organ
most Involved
.Lnra the LIHar
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18
Those melancholy days have come,
The worst O. al the year;
When women jaw and make soft soap
And the old man takes his clear"

Medfurd and New Bedford, Mass,
although their names rhyme, occas-
sionally don't quite harmonic, as
witness the following. The Medford
editor perpetrate5 this:
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

a minister once asked a tipsy fellow
leaning up against fence, where he
expected to go when he died. '1f L
can't get along any better than 1 can
now" he SAID, I shan't go any
Where.n
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

Charity is an eternal debt and with
out limit.
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

There wasa fair maiden OF Medford,
Who was "smashed" on n youth in Nev
Bedford:
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

The symptoms q
Liver complaint
are uDeaEihese 4
pGinsin the side.
SOn efimez the
pain Is IN ths
shoulder, ard is
mfsfaken fer he
rheu o. ssm. rns
The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1872-04-18

And now, that frugal housekeepers
are getting their soap grease scraps TO-
geJEer, and liking up Teaches" it IS
about time to start those stanZas OF
William Culleu's' on Iheir annual
round
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1872-05-17
The hOOllN astcr Of CalirOr
min.

A pedagogue in Curlew, who was
''haa up for numerically welting the
back ola little girl, justified his action
by explaining that "she persisted in
hinging paper pellets at him when his
back was turned" That is no excuse.
The Town Crier once taught school up
in the mountains, and about every half
hour had to remove his coat and scrape
off the dried paper wads adhering to the
nap. He never permitted trifle like
this to unsettle his patience; he just
kept on wearing that gaberdine until it
had no nap, and the wads would not
stick. But when they took to dipping
them in mucilage he made complaint to
the Board of Directors. "Young man."
said the Chairman, s'ef you don't like
our ways, you'd better sling your
blankets and git. Prentice Milford
tort skule yer for MORN six months,
and he never said word again the
wads."
The Town Crier briefly explained
that Mr.. Mulford might have been
brought up to the paper wads, and
didn't mind them.
:.It amt no use" said another di-
rector, ''the children hev to be ANU
sed.'
The Town Crier protested that there
were other amusements quite as diver
ting; but the third Director here arose
and remarked:
Il perfectly agree with the Cheer;
this youngster better travel. consid-
er as paper wads lies at the root ofpop-
pillar edyercation; ther necessary
adjunx Nv the school system. Mr.. Chair.
man, move and second thet this ye,
skoolmaster be shot,
}, The Town Crier did not remain te
observe the result of the voting.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1872-05-17
"KnoyyS how it is HIMSELF

"Fat Contributor processes to
know how it is, and tells it is this way:
Il know when I have made success
lin lecturing] without being told. The
committee bring their wives up to the
platform and introduce them to me.
Some influential citizens come up and
introduce themselves. The editor takes
me warmly by the hand, and wants to
know where the next number of his
paper will reach me. If 1 stay over
night with my friend, the association
president, he invites in some of the
neighbors, and there is a social time in
the rarlor. Or, if am at the hotel,
the boys call around and invite me
out to eat oysters and it is difficult to
get away from them sometimes to 90 to
bed. There are people to see me off
i'll the morning, and I hear it stated
over and above board that if l should
come to that town again the hall
wouldn't be large enough to hold the
people. Little boys on the street are
respectful. But when fail nobody is
to be introduced. The editor who in
the afternoon said he must be sure and
see me after the lecture slips off home.
His paper doesn't reach me, either
(unless it reaches me under the fifth
rib The secretary hands me the stim-
pulated amount with fIigid politeness,
and departs AS [ pass along the side
walk on my way to the hotel l hear
some little boy shout 'humbug!' in a
voice of startling shrillness. The land
lord surveys me with look of pity as
l enter-he has heard all about it-and
| sneak off to bed as soon as possible.
No one attends me to the depot in the
morning to see me off, and I. overhear
a rude fellew tell another on the plat
form, as | am about to step into the
cars, If that fraud ever comes to this
town again he'll get a head put ON
him.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1872-05-17

A paper at Petersburg, Virginia, has
the following suggestive item on carpet
bags:
"A man from Maine has our post
Office: Vermont man represents us in
Congress-; fellow from Pennsylvania is
our street commissioner; our commits
sioner of revenue is Massachusetts,
man; Philadelphian is jailcr; the chief
Of police is Penusylvanian; two negroes
represent us in the Legislature;a Maine
man represents us in the Senate
This is one of the results of a system
of government that has blossomed out
to perfection under the Grant dynasty.
Gut this pernicious thing off at the roots
and not only Petersburg, but the
whole Southern country will be relieved.
The Greeley-B Brown movement promis-
es to do it if the National Democracy
will lend hand.-St. Louis Times.