The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1872-02-08

un1a H. Swain, Of Winchester, the Vice
Jos ,J,dI of the United States. or TIN
fIc thina to ito place his name on TIN
meN Nin ticket as candidate for Vicc.--Nash
.uis Union and american
This reminds us, as the 'late lamenteC
,i,colu" used to say, IF a good joke latel.
narnetrated. We can't help telling thu
irore. albeit it should have been seen il
p.d.r to be appreciated. Don't say, by
soy of criticism, that you can't see a joke
w. saw one, last Thursday, and others saw
:, and everybody talked about it. W.
.nu,d no more persuade ourself to not tel
:, than U. S. Grant could persuade him
..lft TO not take a present. But we hardly
rrow how to begin, or where. Certes, We
are afraid. But then, Judge Swain is
ssosible man, and enjoyed the joke as well
az any one, and we have no fear Of his an
ror. for he has too much good. hard old
Cannon sense to care a continental
We will risk Poney, upon the ground that
popev risked himself. We mean Poney
steel, who is just as clever a mountaineel
a. ever breathed the exhilerating and life
r~sstoring atmosphere Of the grand old
cumberland mountains. Poney is as full
oftun as IN egg Is OF meat. He was ush-
cred into this world full Of it, and he has
kept up the proper quantity sufficient for
health. In this respect he is a Scion of
wisdom, and when the Makcr-of-all, in his
wonderful and mysterious judgments,
snail see fit to summon Poney to another
mode OF existence, where all will be
made right which so puzzles us here,' we
do verify believe that POney will depart
with a laugh upon his honest old face, and
aheart s~ufcharged with fun. True, there
Is not much fun in dying. It's Il solemn
thing to think about. and we wonder that
people don't think about it more; not be-
cause it is solemn, but because they have
so small anumber ofyears on earth where
in to indulge their sordid, guilty passions
for glory, gain, and so forth. All! indeed
Il a wonder. as the preacher would say
that men, in view Of the uncertainty and
breyity OF life, and, worse than all, the
dreadful, dark uncertainty of the-the-
vhateyer it is after this life-that they do
not devote more time to consideration OF
matters less earthly, less selfish. We don't
mean to exclude ourself (editorially
speakiug.) from the periphery Of this re
mark, but We do mean to say that human
nature is human nature-an assertion
which we defy any man to dispute. And
vou might as well attempt to prevent the
revolution of this world by the stamp OF
your pedal extremity as we'll attempt by
a proclamation to make the Mississippi
flow towards its source; rs well attempt TO
make Z. s. Grant govern Il country upor
principles of honesty and universal liber-
tv; or restore our country to law and or
der under Radical rule, as attempt to sub
dine AN affection of the risibilitics when
such a joke is perpetrated as some mis-
~chievous fellows perpetrated on Judge
Swain. No wonder the people never die
in our county. They laugh too much
There is too much fun in them. Funny
men and men who laugh never die unit
thew ret So old as to become tired of life
And all of them get fat. Their obesity is
opparent as soon as they begin to laugh
quite heartily. And we would certify
that over one dozen men in winchester
have more adiposity about them now than
thew had before the occurrence which we
shall now relate as briefly as possible, to-
wit:
Poney Steel came to to wn. Poncy is a
~iayorite, Just as clever fellows frequently
Get to be. Not long since he came to
town and some of those same mischicvouS
fellows of whom we have been speaking
covered his skeleton of a horse with Il new
saddle, and put a new bit in his mouth
and fastened huge pistol holsters to the
said saddle--indeed Poney didn't kno"
his q%uadruped. All of which has been ex'
nlained in a previous number of our in
teresting newspaper. Poney's Rosinantt
died next day or so after he rode him back
and there Is no gentleman who does no
regret the death of a horse that had 50
much outcome in him. In due course o.
time Poncy came to town and %sojourne'
a night. Ad interim his clothes were
stolen and a new paraphernalia substitu-
ted which, with all its big tin buttons
huge beau-knots of carmine and scarlet
was donned by Poney. and Poney ENJOY
ed the joke as well as any man could wl'
was losing nothing, but making fun fora
as well as himself. Anon Judge Swan
was sent for. Clarence Horn was empow
cred to take his best buggy for him. TIL
Judge was reluctant ut first, if not stub
born. But when he understood that
stranger was in town--that a large crow
was around that stranger--that the stran
ger wanted to see Judge swain, &C.
down went his hammer, pegs. and all ,h
articles known to the art of Crispin. an
very soon he was en- route for town a. fas
as horse flesh could take him. DR.. NJ
informed the Judge that Geo. Franc
Train was at the hotel, and wanted a cor
terence with him. mo better time tina
this" said the Judge, and Installer he Wi
atthe hotel, where all the Formally Ola
Introduction was carried out. married on
by the natural but %inoportunc vocal den
Onstrations Of any number of lonn
Americas who brought up the rear. ID
0'G. NJ. very wisely suggested that NJ
Train and Mr.. Swain adjourn to prlva
apartments. which was done in due forI
amt then ensued a most learned discour'
between the redoubtable George Frame
Train alias Poney Steel, and the no lie
fedoubtable Judge Josiah Swain. b
Shen the party of the first part announc'
10 the nurtv nf tho sacond mart that lie II