The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1872-10-13

IeHurIN, AlDerC Culk, j. Is. y. OhuuCY.
r. A. Leaphart, John l.. Derrick, Frank
Lardaway.
Fairfield. Democrats %. r. Thomp-
son, q. w. Jarrett. DR.. Ovens, J. X.
Davis. VIM. Woodward. j. Q. Davis,
Wm. Durham, Thomas McKlnstry, u.
E. Boulevere, Jesse Gladden..
Republicans-John Z. Matthews, John
q. Wilson, s. A. True, G. P. Hoffman,
George Burns, james Aiken, Christopher
Coleman, Jacob Corder, John Lumpkins,
John Il. Fidwell.
LANCASTER Democrats L. Lem
mond, Osborn Floyd, Micl Hilton, J. c.
HilIard, j. N. Taylo., John J. Porter, W.
A. Funderbunk.
A wife asked her husband for new
dress He replied: "Times are hard, nv
dear-so hard 1 can hardly keep nv nose
above WATER" whereupon she retorted,
"You can keep your nose above water
easy enough il you'd mind to, but tue
trouble is that you keep it too much
above brandy"
A Georgia brakeman walking on the
track, didn't notice an approaching
freight train, which struck him-not in
vital part of his body-and knocked
him twenty feet into the mud. He land
ed on his feet. picked up his hat, and
in excited enthusiasm, shouted, "Three
cheers for Greeley; another vote saved. :"
A bride of fourteen is on exhibition at
Niagara this season. She looks younger,
and child-like wipes her eyes with her
apron when she cries. She had her first
row with her husband last Wednesday,
called him nasty man, and said she
wanted to see her ma.
A Washington youth escorted young
lady up town ria the horse cars, paying
her fare, as q matter of course The
next morning his mother called on the
lady and demanded back the ten cents
TINT her hopeful son had SO extravagant-
y parted with.
A Carlinville OILY wife becoming
angry because she could not have the
last word in dispute. recently put her
sick husband out of doors at midnight
and In thunder storm. In the morn
ing she found him on the stoop dead
from exposure. She is in on insane
asylum.
Pythagoras taught the transmigration
OF souls. Whoever has read much, has
come to believe in the transmigration of
In our day may be found in the textbook
OF old Hlerocles who lived in the sixth
century.
In Switzerland, milk maid, who is o
good singer, gets more salary than others,
because under the influence of music
cows "give down" and give more milk.
An Eastern farmer is trying to hire Pa
repa Rosa aud kellogg to sing round the
pump.
One limo of the celebrated tapestry at
Plymouth, worked by Miles Standish's
daughter, reads: ''Incline my hart to
doe they will" What deer girl she
must have been.
Two young ladies have just been nd
mitted to the bar of Salt Lake Citv. No
doubt they expect to become the Portias
OF their profession, and save Mormon
Antonios from the knives Of ayaricious
Mormon Shylocks.
AFrench authoress says: "A kiss gives
more pleasure than anything else in the
world" 70 this an editor responds,
THAT writer evidently never experienced
the childish rapture of descending the
stairs by sliding down the banisters."
One of the amusements at Chicago
PIC-Hlc WAS W place u silver dollar IN
dish containing about an inch of molas-
ses, and let O squad of boys compete in
trying to take it out the piece with their
teeth.
Nothing is more indicative Of the earn.
estness of life than the sight of d we'll de.
veloped male creature spending eight
hours day in trying to wear ont dry
goods box with the seat of his pants.
Mr.. Gerald Massey is engaged on a
work to be entitled Myth. Miracle and
Mystery" Portions Of the subject will
be treated III o series OF lectures, which
he is preparing for delivery in England
and America.
Another type-setting machine has
been invented in Des Moines. Iowa. 1t
is claimed for it that it will set 5000
ems on hour, of any sized type and of
any width of column; can be worked by
q boy. and costs only 500.
Idle worship"-Feminine devotion
to strange gawds.