davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
HOW A PRE3EDENT rs
ELECTED.

Each State is entitled to as many
electors OF President and Vice Pres
ident as it has Senators and Repre-
sentatiyes in Congress.
In each State the electors arc cho-
sen by plurality vote. That is, if
there are three sets of electors voted
for, the set having the highest mum
ber of votes is chosen.
But a candidate for President in
order to be successful, must have a
D'Gjortty Of all the electors. The
electoral college, as now constituted,
consists of 3I7. 159 therefore, are
necessary for choice.
Ii there be three candidates for
President, and neither of them re-
ceIves majority OF the electoral
college, then there is no choice, and
the election goes to the House of
Representatives.
Tie House must confine their
choice to the three highest candidates
voted for by the electors. The Rep
resentatiyes vote by States, and each
State has but one vote; SO that the
power of Deleware is as great as that
OF New York. Each State has one
vote. The majority of the State def-
e9ation casts its vote. 4 candidate,
to be successful, must receive ma
jority OF all the States, or nineteen
States. II the delegation is divided,
the vote of the State cannot be cast
and is therefore lost.
As the present House is constitu-
ted, and it is upon atis House that
the election will deyolve In the event
there is no election by the people,
nofainally the republicans hold twen-
ty States; but its majority in TN of
tuese it holds by the slender teAare
Of one single vote.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
SCENE IN
BEECyIEl'S CHURCH.

As Rev Henry Ward Bcechcr gave
out the last hymn this morning, q
woman about forty years of age,
wearing spcctacles, aud attired i'll q
faded dress. well worn shawl and n
bonnet OF the last century, over which
which was thrown green gauze veil,
mounted bench in the vcstlbu.e,
near the i1ain entrance, and flourish.
ing aud old cotton umbrella began
harranguing the immense gathering
= Oh, YOU old Free lovers" said she,
shcrc you are ~ your fins silks and
satins! Gou cone 10 worship the
God OF Frcc-lovc, and you care moth
ing for the Saviour Of mankind. Mr..
Beecher, the great pastor, has just re.
sumcd his seat. You cant fool me;
you're a lrec.lover, aud SO am l.
Freelove is the
Here venerable usher approa chetl
the now frantic woman, and requested
her TO keep quiet and depart. T.c
woman refused TO move, aud flourish
ed her umbrella more wildly than be
fore. Don't put hand onto mc, old
man! Git. Git" said bhe, poking
her umbrella Ut the usher.
Come down, viii you: if yon don't
I'll call the police" said be ncryously
twitching his fingers.
The wonld-be preacher twirlcd the
umbrella about her head, and with 4
shrill cry swoopcd down upon the de-
lenselcss usher, aud throwing her
arms around his neck, gave him i
hearty smack on the cheek. exciaim-
iug-"Thanl. the Lord, the old Gen
eral kissed me
By this time vast multitude had
gathered in the ycst,bulc aud street,
aud the scene provoked much laugh
ter. The usher could not disengage
himself from the wonan's grasp. She
forced him to the church entrance
the blush.ng official using all his
strength 10 free himself from her-as
the congregation began pouring from
the church. Please let mc go-do
let 90 oil me, or I'll call the police -
With one vigorous effort he freed him
self from her, and shouted, "Begone! !
Away with your "Oho! General,
that's il, is it = and she made another
dive for him. but the yerable gentle
man escaped her clutches aud was lost
in the crowd.-CiHcjHudti Enquirer.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

gown, | must have found it before
yon appeared"
'&"But why didn't You let us know
that yon bad recovered it?" asked
in surprise, thinking of the proverbial
mystery in the working OF the female
heart.
But tho explanation was simple
enough.
How could / make known its re-
covery without the necessity Of re-
voaling the circumstances under which
it was found 7" she asked.
Then with sudden gush, AS she
leaned her head against my arm
"Oh, Ned how thoughtful of you
You know | should have died Of
shame to have had it known, aud you
managed it so nicely that nobody but
you and | ever knew anything about
it, Il was your tact and delicacy in
that affair, more than almost anything
else, that made me love you, Ned"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

There lived in Maine an old far
mer named Ransom, who was one of
the most fearful old reprobates that
ever lived. He had two sons, whose
moral sense was fully as bad as that
of the old man. One tins a revival
meeting took place in the neighbor-
hood, and many converts were added
to the roll of the faithful Among
others who were induced to come to-
the meeting one night were old Ran
som and his boys. The old man
looked on with considerable interest
until the minister gave out a hymn
and "lined" in good old Methodist
fashion. When he came to the line,
Return ye saasom-ed sinners home,"
the old man seized his hat and shout
ed, ''Come, on boys; ] know d-d
will they didn't want as here"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

How Haas Cor EvES.-Once on q
time there lived jovial Dutchman,
whose name was Hans Won Shrimp
etihel. He had wife. BE had a
little grocery where he sold beer
He gave credit to q parcel of dry
customers, and kent his book with q
piece of white chalk on the head
board of the beadstead.
One day Mrs. Shrimpetifel, during
a neat fit, cleaned up tie house, set
Ting the old man s accounts by wip-
ing away every chalk mark.
Pretty soon the old beer vender
come home and saw what ruin his
frau had wrought. Then ne said:
"Mein Cott, Frau Shrimpetifel,
what for you make ruined man NIT
me? guess not. You make wipe
away all dem names and figures what
| owe dem fellers what's going to pay
before dey get ready, and I loose
more as zwi huntret tollarr'
His frau left the room in disgust.
When she returned he had recovered
the head-board with chalk marks
Then she said:
''Hans, you have make dem all
right. don't it?"
well, mein tear frau, I make ter
figures all right, but put town some
peter names as dem old fellers vot
you wiped out"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

A Full Days WoEK.-Ir. IL. OF
Smith6eld, don't object TO having a
nnan do full days work, at least, so
We would Judge from the following
story:
A short time ago a man went to
his place for work. Dir. u. set him
to pIowing around forty acre field.
After he had plowed faithfully all
day, until the sun was about half an
hour high, he expressed his opinion
that it was about time to quit work.
"Oh, 10. said II. '.you can plow
around six or eight times more just
as well as not. .
So the hired man plowed around
SAX or eight times, then went to the
house, took care OF his team, MIXED
nine COWS, ate his supper, and found
ten O'Clock staring him in the face
from the clock.
Said the hired man to Mrs. u,
Where is Mr. NJ"
The good woman answered. "He
has retired. Do you wish to see
him?"
He replied that be did. After be-
ting conducted to the bedroom he
said; "Mr. NJ, where is the axe?''
Why" said NJ, what do you
want with an ak?
We'll" said the hired man, "I
thought you might like me to split
wood till breakfast was ready"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

YoUR VILLAGE PAPER.-We find
the following sensible little article in
an exchange, and produce it, hoping
that all the people in this vicinity may
read and note its moral :: Do the
city papers say anything in regard to
your own county? Nothing. Do they
contain notices of your schools and
churches. meeting, Improvements,
and hundreds of matters of interest
which your paper publishes without
pay? Not an item. Do they ever
say word calculated to draw atten-
tion to your county and its numerous
thriving towns, and aid in their pro-
gress and enterprise? Not a line.
And yet there are those who take such
contracted views of this matter, that
unless they are getting as many sqnare
inches of reading matter in their own
paper they think they are not getting
the worth oftheir money. Itreminds
us ola person who took the largest
pare of boots in box because they
cost the same as pair much smaller,
but fit.n
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
THE BOY THAT PUNCHED
TEE PRINCE OF WALES.

The Paris paper, are indulging in all
kinds ofpretty stories about tho Queen
and the Prince of Wales. The 4uenir
National tells one that is certainly
not generally known. During his
Royal liighness' illness, robust
young man, half countryman, half
gentleman, was always remarked
at the Chateau Sandringham; he was
always admitted to the patients bed
side, and the Prince appeared TO be
deeply attached to him. Everybody
was puzzS at the presence of the
stranger r,sswhose name and position
were kept secret. However, all has
since been discovered, and here is the
enigma explained: In 1855, during
the stay OF the royal family in the Isle
of Wight, the Prince of Wales kicked
over basket OF shells which boy
was gathering. The boy red with
rage, dared his Royal Highness ito
do it again" and he would see what
he would get. The Prince did it
again, and the boy thereupon landed
his fist upon his Royal Highness' nose,
giving him pair of black eyes. The
Qpeen, on seeing the Prince, insisted
upon knowing the truth. You have
only got what you deserve" said her
Majesty, land were you not not al
ready sufficiently punished, l would
punish you myself. / hope you will
always be served in the same way
when you are guilty of such conduct" :"
The Queen then sent for the boys
parents, and offered to bring him Zip.
The parents consented; the boy has
grown up with the Prince of Wales,
and is now treated as his foster
brother.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

N. :. DU E0Es & CO.,
Wholesale ana Retzi,
ALBANY BATH HOUSE!

ulHE UNDERSIGNED WOULD RESPECT
fully inform the citizens of Albany and vi
cinty that ne has taken charge of this Establish
iaent, and, by keeping clean rooms and paying
ztrict attention to business, expects 10 suit en
those who may favor him with their patronage.
Having heretofore carried on nothing but
First-Clsss Hair Dressing Saloons,
he expects to give entire satisfaction to all.
@- Children and Ladies' Hair Desty cut
and shampooedg JOSEPH WEBER.
v3n33tf.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

In Switzerland they give salt to
cattle in the form of little bricks,
composed of nine-tenths salt and
one-tenth potter's clay. These bricks
are placed in boxes at the foot of the
manger, and within easy reach of the
animal, which will take what instinct
prompts. and no more. Some use
them in the pasture in the same man
ner, when the animals will lick them
at their pleasure.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

A Persian emigre, recently arrived
at Boston, states that his father was
122 years old, and delighted in $50
grandsons and granddaughter
After some years the train extended
to such length that the great grand
pa could not ever make out who it
was addressed him by the name of
grandpa. His usual question was,
my dear, which of my daughter S
sons are you p
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
ULYSSES ON A SPREE.

Is it not q sad thing that the follow
ing lines may be written and pub
lished about President Of the
United States, and Under such cir
cumataaces that the mass OF the peo-
pie VINO read them, friend or foe,
are forced to believe them true.
We copy from Washington let
ter OF the 10Th to the St. Louis
Timer,
HERE WE Axe AG. MEREYMAs.
Incidentally / mentioned that Mr..
President Grant was very sick
that's what the Administration pa
pers said, bat every one understands
what Grants sickness is. 1t really
was not the delirium tremens, but it
really was not very different. When
the madam was at home he was
maintained in very respectable con-
dition; at least so far as the public
knew. But she's away, now, you
know, and he $ taking every advan-
ta9e Of it. The only time he has
been out the whole week vas when
~ "SAib W tAE CiICuS~ IIlS DrOLnEr-
in-law, Casey, of New Orleans, was
at the White House early in the
evening. They had both been drink
ing, and Grant insisted upon going
to the circus. All Of Casey's argu-
rnents to the contrary were invain-
the President insisted, and arm in
arm the two started out. They at
tracted attention all along as they
walked to tho show, bat their condi-
ton shortly after arriving there was
perfectly beastly. If any one than
the President of the United States
Lad appeared thus drunken in a
place Of public entertainment, he
would have been thrown out aud
handed over to the police. Grants
face Is b!oated and red, and the
White House these days is famous
for its orgies. j. II. L.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

HERE is Quaker toast that has a
thought in it: .'This is me and mine
to thee and thine. I wish when thee
and thine come to see me and mine
that me and mine will treat thee and
thine as kindly as thee and thine
have treated me and mine.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

by AND BY."1There's music
enough in these words for the burden
OF a song. There's hope wrapped up
in them, an ar.iculate beat. OF the
human heart.
BY and by. We heard it as long
ago as we can remember, when we
made brief but perilous journey
from chair to table, and from table to
chair again.
We heard it the other day when
two parted that had been slowing in
their lives" one to California and the
other TO her lonely home.
Everybody says it somehow or
other. The little boy whispers it
when he dreams of exchanging the
little stGbbed boots for those ike a
man.
Tie man nnrners it. when In LIES
middle watch, when he sees his plans
half finished, and his hopes yet in the
bud, waving in the cold, late spring.
The old man says it, when he thinks
of the mortal for the immortal, to-day
for tomorrow
The weary watch for the morning,
and while away the dark with by
and by
Sometimes it sounds like song
sometimes there is sigh or a sob in
it. What wouldn't the world give to
find it in almanacs, set down some
where, no matter if in the dead of
December, to know that it would
surely GOMEZ But fairy-like as it is,
fitting like a starbeam over the dewy
shadow of years, nobody can spare it,
and we look upon the many times
words have beguiled us, the memor.
OF the silver by and by, as like the
sunrise of Ossian, pleasant but mourn
full TO the soul.n
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

The hair on camel weighs about
ten pounds, and sells for more than
500, which shows that it was not
only in the days of Mohammed that
the animal bore great prophet.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

A Missouri couple who couldn't
agree agreed to disagree. They live
in double dwelling, and one daugh-
ter of eighteen. keeps house for the
father IN one side, while the mother
and two children live by themselves
in the other part of the building.
the kitchen and pantry arrangement
only being used IN common. The
husband provides the provisions,
fuel, &C., and the cooking is done on
the same stove.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

Lord Baxfeld, the Scotch Judge,
once said to an eloquent culprit at
the bar. YOU'RE a vera clever
chiel, mon; but I'm thinking ye, wad
be name the waur O. a. hangin' 2
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

Business notices in the Local Columns, rs
cents per line. each insertion.
For legal and Transient advertisements 81 so
per square of ~ lines, for the first insertion,
and 81 90 per square for each subsequent in
sertiDn.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

"My lord" said the foreman of an
Irish jury, when giving in verdict
eve find the man who stole theho
not guilty.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
NOTICE.

TsoR WARE, GLASSWARE. eRocKERY,
80 90 = at sHEDD.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
EARNED HIS passaGE.

1t so happened that while Major
Campton WAS travelling in his own
conveyance, and accompanied by his
wife, during pleasant day in the sum.
mer, he came to halt on the margin
OF a certain river, and shouted for the
ferryman. In due time the indis.
pensibIe gentleman was ready, and
while inquiring the news Of the day
he was suddenly smittcn with new
thought, and dropping the painter to
the old scow, looked inquiringly into
the Majors face, when the following
dialogue ensued:
Stranger, amt your name Major
Campton Z"
Yes, sir, it is. What business
have you to transact with me-"
You are the very man have been
long wanting to see, for you must
know | am the Bully of the North"
Indeed. What do / care for that" "
1--WE heard tell that you are IA
nous fighter. j should like to have
you give me thrashing, If you can.
"Wby, man, / have nothing against
you, and ! do not wish 10 make fool
of myself"
"But you shall, though, my honey,
and you don't cross this ferry until it
is decided whose cock of the walk"
Rcmonstrance on the part OF the
Major was all in vain-the ferryman
was determined to fight. The Major
held short consultation with his
lady, who was, of course, in great
trouble; but taking off his coat and
unbuttoning his straps, he stepped ont
upon a grass spot and waited the fer
ryman's attack.
TO shorten long story, the fight
was a tedious one, and ended in the
total defeat of the challenger, who
presented in himselfafter the strug-
gle, an admirable picture OF mis-
spent life. lie had, however, strength
enough left to ferry the boat across
the river, and when the Major offered
to pay the accustomed fare, the latter
held not out his hand, but, making a
rude bow, exclaimed:
Not a dime, sir. Good afternoon
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05

An EPISCOPAL HoRsE.-In one of
his tours Elder John LELAND came
up at night to a public house where
he was acquainted and whore he pro-
posed to pass the night. The land
lord met him with smiling counte-
nance, and told him that, having
built new barn, he was nicely pre-
pared to Accommodate the clergy.
II have, said he, "a nice stable
with all the improvements, for Epis-
cepal horses, good sort of stables
for Presbyterian horses. while I keep
the old barn for Baptist horses; the
feed is according to the style of sta
ble. . "Well,' replied the Elder,
Everybody knows that ! am Bap-
tist, but my horse isan Episcopalian. /"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-05
THE LOST BROOCH.
BY HAP HAZARD.

Gsxr. So you, here she comes! and upon my
ife, fast asleep
Door. You see, her eyes are open.
GENT. Ay, but their sense is shut.
SI.,ta
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1872-07-04
The Edit0riat ConUenfion Poem
6y Luther B. Aoyes.
THE EDITORIAL YEAR.


Thar a,,t. ~, IN. air Nh. n sioh
.''' go ~ ~
When sleeping tae pillow we've pressed
When visions crowd fast on the souls tnael
sight
ly Ai%ht
tn c,rI.n. that h,,,m r,r IN, b1a.t
The tones that in harmoay stole
Ger our seoses 50 'oothiosly sweet =,
In the long LONG AGO, ana they sllentjy roll
Like lNmnng of bliss oer purified s'Gi
In the stald, purple autumn OF life,
We gaIher me r'peh'hg Ho'I
or eN,l or good, OF peace, or OF stfile,
As or Years vita These qaaI''es Ger have
been r'ie,
Aud late settles every dispute.
Have we scorned, laughed at sadness and
tears,
To charity steeied proud heart
The ashes of hope ttoat away with the years,
Oar Pleasures are Skeletons, mock'ng our
fears,
That refuse to abate or depart
u,,-o ,,o o,a,oa , c,,3 v;lIi,o, ,,1m
IA a o'"'llo' "' s'S''' III nee"
yer tue so"' ana ''e nc"Ft comes "ea'eN'
,v,,N e"',n -. ..,,.-.,...,,
~" J"i S'''p,'S '"' ""S,'H ,'NOA''"
"''' 'o'f ""e'''o"' '"e u'ea'
Thank God that record is made
VI a charity "oo,' a'u grand .
Lndu'ios' IN i"n'r'A Az '"'' hvreF WIN 'a"e'
vi Pe"p'e ""o 6"''' Vi PeoP'e ""o
~ p'ale"' ,,.,
he"1Nihs ueSo'"'e 'd"u
Last wear, when the ros,cs of juno
,,,I H'h''yu or'Sh' ~ ',e'' oe'u'F anu o'oo"''
he'I t',t o''u' anu '''e oee9 anu '"' ho"'''
~. e'S J." 'une ..,,
N""n'eI na'u1e' '"''' "o'"eA"' !e' S'oou Ut
~ h'Eh noon '......,.,c .,,
va " 'I'o' '''''' VOC ''''' NV ''' ''N0
p,"t,, ,,' "' r, ',,,, ,.i,t oG ia,,
Rn,msJ ,,n,,,a ond IN. hrcotl, oft y hroozc
a. II n,ss.I
r,n,nd , s,o,. far ton ioyons ioo hri,lisnt
to l,s,-. '"' ~
Twas on,,rI,,1 ., with st,,Iass uirhtl
Saw its waters glide onward, below
While the scene that enchanted the eye,
stood before
The raDt sense, There the vine clambercd
DER
The neatly wrought lattice, the cpcHing
u.., 49,. a.,, a.,o,, ..
~ - 'i'H 49, "''''''''''4' '''
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1872-07-04

From LETTER to the New York Sun.
\ m.n in Do roit gave ms some idea
OF the richness of the soll III that vi
entity lie says there wasn't any
place on earth where thiugs grow n
they do there. He sald his wife
never made bread. She always made
little buisruil the SIZE OF an egg, and
she would leave I'm an hout 10 swell
by themselves, and they would grow
into twelve pound loavcs. ] thought
To myscli you are loaf er. RE con.
tlnurd bis growing tale aud said
"Once there was man. lie went
into tho woods and chopped down
four trees. He used the -four stunp-
for corner posts, and he built him =
nice log house on those stamps. Then
| peXt morning he found himself and
family up sixty feet Ia the air, with II
lot OF Indians down cellar waiting to
cut their hair on, and the Indians did
scalp the whole lot Of 'em."
"StrauLer," said |, "you dou't
mean to tell me that those trees grew
sixty feet in one night.
"Sir do" says he "and not only
tha, they hoisted the house up with
'em."
"ire you sure it wasn't Glly-one
feet?' | asked meckly.
"Sir" SAID he "I'ncver preyaIicato,
especially or one foot"
$50 they took aoi scalpcd them
all did they ?' said |.
"rhey did" said he.
GLOW in the name Of Mary who
had tho little lamb, did they get up
to 'cm Z" | ASKED.
Says he, "lsespcrted sir, those In.
dinus each one sawed Off n tree tben
each Indian sat on n stump, and those
stamps grew the Indians up to tho
house, aud they seaIped the family