Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1872-09-10
IRISH WIT.
FAMOUS BULLS THAT HAVE MADE
THE WORLD LAUGH.
(From the British Quarterly Keview.)

(From the British quarterly heVleW'D
The quickness of reply and richness Of
wit exhibited by Irishmen is unequaled by
anv other nation. A native Of Ireland can
always get out of a difficulty by the sharp
ness of his wits. When the officer told
private to 60 and let his captain know, be
was the idlest rascal in the regiment, he
answered, "Please yonr honor, you would
not have me 60 with a lie in mouth?"
There is often, too, a beautiful pathos in
these Irish tales that is closely allied to
their humor. A poor old woman being
sympathized with on the loss Of her teeth,
replied, "Time for me to lose 'em when I've
nothing for 'em to do" An Irishman nev-
er blunders from stupidity, but because his
head has more than it can carry. His
name is invariably associated in our minds
with bulls. r FI.s-F
A bull has been explained as false ex-
preston oftruth, and Sydney Smith calls it
a counterpart of a witticism; for wit dis
covers real relations that are not apparent,
while bull admits apparent relations that
are not real. The sum and substance OF Mis
ria Edgeworth's essay on "Irish Bulls" ap-
pears to be, that it is impossible to define
what they are. They are distinct from the
bluuders of other countries, butin what dis
tinction that consists has yet to be discoV-
cred.
Coleridge says the particular species bull
is often confused with the genus blunder,
and be defines a bull as "a mental juxta-
position of incongruous ideas with the SEN
sation, but without the sense of connec-
tion." A simpler explanation would be
that a bull is laughable blunder. The
word is old, and one of the earliest uses OF
it is to be found in Millions apology for
Smectymnuus" 1642): "But that such
poem should be toothless, 1 still affirm to
be bull, taking away the essence of that
which it calls itself. For if it bite neither
the person nor the vices, how is it a satire?
and if it bite either, how is it toothless? So
that toothless satyrs are as much as if he
had said toothless teeth"
Many Irish bulls contain, good deal of
truth wrapped up in them; thus the obser-
vatlon, "Where will you tirId any modern
building that has lasted so long as the an
Gent" is only perverted expression of a
truth, for the old things that have come
| down to us are better than most of the new
ones, in that they are those which have
been selected, the struggle for life having
| destroyed the bad. Most of the bulls we
know of are so mirth-producing, that we
think we can not do better than string a
few together. An Irish coroner, in remark
ing on the great mortality of q certain win
ter, went on to observe that "there are a
great many people dying this winter who
never died BEFORE" Il must have been a
brother of this gentleman who while play
ing at cards noticed that shilling was de-
ficient in the pool, and cried out. "Here
is shilling short, who put it IMP" 1t was
Sir Richard Steele that said to certain
great man whom he wished to invite, "lf
sir, you ever come within mile OF my
house, Ihope you will stop there" 1t be-
ing remarked that nobleman's wife had no
children, medical man hazarded the opin-
ion that he had noticed such to be heredi-
tary in some families.
A countryman who was indicted for
stealing a goose brought neighbor to
swear that he remembered that very goose
in bis possession ever since it was gosling.
An Irishman who was prisoner for steal
ing a gun, on hearing this defense, pre-
vailed on fellow -countryman of his to
swear that be remembered the gun in his
possession ever since it was pistol. The
following description of very thin man is
not bad; "He's grown so thin, | hardly
| knew him. You are thin and l am thin
but he is thinner than both of US put to-
gether." Sir Boyle Roche was living,
walking bull, and his speech was one con-
tinued blunder. In consequence large
number of bulls have been attributed tc
him. In speech in the Irish House ot
Commons he remarked, "Single misfor
tunes never come alone, and the greates
of all possible misfortunes is usually follow
ed by greater"
Paddy Blake's echo, that answered tht
question "How do you do, Paddy Blake
with the words, "Pretty well, thank you
, SIR" was forestalled by the echo of Charen
ton mentioned by Lord Bacon, which OF
the mention of the devils name answeret
Va-t-eu." The self convicted Irishmsn VIII
was looking over gentleman writing SOM
, uncomplimentary remarks and called out
"you lie, you scoundrel, !" is to be found il
, Galland's ''Paroles remarquables des Orien
taux." +'
Horace Walpole declared that the bes
; bull he ever heard was the saying of th
, man who declared, 81 hate that woman
for she changed me at nurse" This may b
traced to Sancho Panza. There are practi
q cal bulls as well as spoken ones, such q
the action of the man who had dislike Il
a certain banker, and after collecting hi
notes burnt them to spite him. A quarter
master of regiment of light horse, VIII
. was both heavy and tall, jeered an Irish
man on the proneness of bis countrymen t.
make bulls. "Why, you gigantic fool" re
: piled the Irishman, tiny country neve
: made such bull as England did when SD
) made you light horseman."
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