The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1872-12-17

trade, but take not hold Of sword or speal
or strap of leathern hide, for, from the
uplifting or falling of those wicked
instruments came never good, but blow.
and bruises misery and death
Now, look ye here talk as long as ye
like, but talk while I'm lickin' of ye
cause time is precious, and mustn't be
wasted nohow. Do you mean to take it
Gghtin' or lying down, only make haste :?
You are hard on me-. Colonel, and to
tell the truth, [ would much rather not
take it at ALL
But you must ! roared the black
smith picked allgators, you must
Monkeys is riz, and snakes will wake.
III kuock yc into horse-shoes and then
into horse.ualls if ye keep me waitin'
Now, is it fghtn' or lying DOWN.
We'll then, I'll take it 6ghting.' the
man OF peace replied,
With wild yell tn, now infarated
Colonel rushed upon his intended victim
the, fatal strap was swinging in the air ;
but stay-can you. dear reader, Imagine
the astonishment of a school-teacher caueo
by his own pupil /; Broadway dandy.
hustled by uewy.lauded Irish emigranl
n general ordered to stand at ease by a
drummer boy-if you can,you may imag-
inc how Colonel Quagg felt when show
er Of blow, we'll directed and incessant.
began to fall upon him, and that he was
hit everywhere. aud that he could NOT
plant single blow upon the body Of his
opponent A bob.tailed bulls sufferiuge
in fly time were as nothing compared to
those of the bewidered Colonel. He saw
more stars than Hcrsohell ever dreamed
of; he felt as if he was all nose. and tha,
horribly swollen one; then as if his
bones went in aud his blood came out ;
at last hc went down 'all of heap with
the long brother atop Of him, still pound
ing away with all his might, and singing
little hymn softly to himself
Hold hard = gasped the Colonel, you
don't want to kill me, do ye, brother?'
BY no means was the reply, never
theless bringing down his fist with ire.
mendous bash upon the Colonel's nose
as though he saw Il fly there aud wished
to kill it but, said he playfuliy, knock
ing away one of his adversary's loose
teeth, to make his mouth look neat and
tidy, Il want you, Colonel, before | leave
off hammering your body, to promise me
two little things viz, you must give up
drinking Of rum, which is perdition and
snare, and on tho trunk line to destruc-
ton, You must not i'll use, by word or
deed, any member Of the Grace. Walking
Brethren, and you must come to our next
camp-meeting clean-shaved, and with
contrite heart
Il won't muttered the Colonel, mot
for all the tobacco in Virginny-not for
to be postmaster
Then | must sing another little hymn
Immediately the helpless Colonel's tor.
ments recommended. All he could see
was the tall mans arms whirling over
could feel was the blows of his adversary,
or rather Of his castigator, descending up.
on his already frightfully bruised body,
as he snuffled, with an occasional STAN.
mer, the words of a popular hymn.
4 du give in,' family whispered the
expiring Colonel.
Happy to hear it, Colonel said the
Rev. Stock 1olligr, rising, perhaps you
will kindly look to my horse. which cast
a shoe just now
The Colonel shod the nag as we'll as
his bruised arms would permit, and the
minister, gravely handing him q coin,
mounted his steed and rode away.
At the next camp-meeting Colonel
Quagg was seen seated on the neophyte's-
seat. A brother rose to address the
meetiDg-he was a long, lanky brother,
with face like ounce, three parts
withered. He said how happy he felt to
have been the means o. the conversion Of
Colonel Quagg. He confessed that he
himself had been as one Of tn. wicked
he confessed that he had been a prize
fighter, but having perceived the error OF
of his ways, had reformed, and joined the
Grace Walking Brethren; having said
which the heroic parson sat down.
Colonel Quagg discarded rum and
clergy.lcking, and is now, as Elder
Qua2g, shining light among the Grace.
Walking Brethren.
'Newly entered.