The Tipton advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Cedar Co., Iowa) 1856-1962, 1872-09-19
oR1RLRY Ar FIRE ISLAND
Hs Teaches ! Ladyn to swim
what he Knows About y
= aa~aa49 NatAtion. 1910 sfsil

N SURF HOTEL, Aug. z, l072.
"why. ne can swim lIke . duck.
said an enthusiastic Greeleyite - b.
stood upon the 6each to-day and
watched the vegetable candidate fol
the Presidency buflet the biiiows o
the Atlantic like = shirted dolphin
But the next moment . mighty break.
er ssissd tho bold sWina,ner aud stood
him ugon his head, his heels beating
the thinssir II ! desperate struggle to
alter his abnormal attitude. .fa.1
I l supp0se there were two or three
hundred guests. farmer folks. etc.. on
the shore 1t the tims. The news that
Horace wss going nut to wrestle with
Neptune resulted IN the forming OF .
iAfCe procession. which marched In
god order 70 tlle scene OF ho.tilitles,
and took upsuch favorable positions
. the nature Of the ground would per-
NIT. As the veteran mermsn emery
ed ffom the bath house the crowd
yelled approvinely, and the boys shied
clam shells at him IN IN encouraging
swsy. We sts1 h'.si laa By*
II Hts Apollo-like form never showei
- bessef advsotage, aud were u not
sbsths slight tendency of tijis right
Aip ID play see saw with MS iest (pro-
ducing d peculiar, stumbling gait he
might be said TO have advanced
ssgsscesulIy" to the water line. Half
. dossn young lady bathers had placed
shsinselves under bis protection for a
plunge In the brine.
.'Oh, dear, Mr.. Greeley, know 1
can never stand It," said n beautiful
blonde % big wave burst, envelope
ing he- little feet In the creamy foam.
"Pshaw, my dear, you needn't be
afraid. I'll protect you" And 60 he
did, 10 the great nneasiness Of her low
/ o., who beheld the dextrous veteran
(mistaking her neck for her waist)
enc!rcling her with his arm and drag
her after him as though he meant to
drown her. In fosr feet of water they
suddenly disappeared from view, and
reAppeared after Ave seconds, the
young lady in q terrible state Of fright
The kind old man endeAverei to paci
~ her.
STEADY. my DEAR he said. en-
deavori.,g TO hide his nervousness,
/" there's no use OF getting flighty. II
IL natural for the human family to
swim"
"Oh, Mr.. Greeley. how can you say
~" exclaimed he wretched maiden.
wildly spurting the sand and brine
from her mouth.
"You ain't accustomed 70 II, my
child; calmly endure 1t = little longer
and you'll like n. /"
mo, never, never. I want to be
unnatural. I don't want 70 belong to
the human family. Mr.. Greeley, and
-" here another huge breaker Gu,
short her !rensy. and. lifting both
bathers, hurled the sage headIong over
his fair charge. A volley Of cheers
arose from the beach as he recovered
himself, quickly seized her by the
back Of the neck and one leg, and held
her aioit, dripping and struggling with
the fine energy that . female can exert
under the pressure of mingled rage.
modification and fright.
"She still lives" faintly murmured
an old lady near me, who, when a
child, had been dandied on John
Quincy Adams knee.
Come, that's played out, old man.
Fetch her ashore" ejacuIated al an
cry countrymau. suggestively gather
ing handful Of sand. thought
sou knew better than to be yanking q
poor girl around that way.
But by this time the horror-stricken
aud incensed lover had waded in,
boots aud oil, aud rescued his sweet.
heart from the perilous clutches Of the
chivalric mer man, who stood gazing
stupidity after them with his back to
the sea, until the waters, collecting
their strength, struck HIN abeam with
. mighty force, and landed hin,
sprawling far upon the beach. That
ended the sweet old philanthropist g
attempt to prove what " know about
t1atation"