The weekly Panola star. [volume] (Panola, Miss.) 1857-1881, 1872-11-16
Ezekiel Perkins Hat.

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Ezekiel Perkins Hat.
The following story Is told Of n
genial aud festive lawyer, OF the
olden time, by name Ezekiel Perkins
"A vell-to>do bachelor, who was al,
ways made welcome at social gath
eriugs, and was very popular. His
weakness was too great at,nduess
for good wine, Now, Mr.. Perklns
had a few peculiarities; among them,
he had sn enormous head, his hats
always having to be made for him,
Then, having got one to ht his i'm.
menss Uranium, he took tho very
useless preesution of putting label
in the crown thereof, reading, "Eze-
kiel Perkins, Counselor and Attor-
pey at-law, Hartford, Conn
Ills peculiar social failing was,
that at oil stag dinner parties land
to them he cot,oned the most he got
he got--wslI, there is no use shirk-
ing it, he got rather intoxicated early
in the evening. lie, however, had
the faculty of knowing when he had
got as much az he could comfortably
carry, and knowing this, to take his
leave.
One evening, Mr.. Perkins wended
his way to one OF the best mansions
of Hartford. lie was in full dinner
dress--bluc coat, withvgilt buttons,
whito vest, with black combinations,
and spotless linen. Lightly he
stepped along, his hat a little to one
side, swinging his cane, and hum
ming an air as he went. lie WAS in
high spirits, in view of spending an
unusually pleasant evening--enjoy-
ing the affair in anticipation; and
how often does it exceed the reality
Having arrived, and deposited his
hat among q number Of others on the
ball table, he in due course sat down
to dinner.
Now, Il joker, knowing his head
and the propensity to indulge toe
freely at these meetings, determined
to have bit OF fun at his expense
So, during the time which occurred
before dinner was announced, be
managed to take the label out o.
Mr.. Perkins hat, and afiix it in the
crown of the smallest hat on the ia.
be. ile then retired, and awaited
events. The dinner was, as Mr.
Perkins expected, prime affair; Sc
that, what with song, jest, wit anc
wine, he found himself, at the end o
a capital story by his host, "dowl
to his bearings" as sailor woult
say. Rising from bis chair, care
fully steadying himself BY the back
he nodded good-by to the host (h'
could do no more), and, expatiatinl
on the good time he had had, ant
the excellence of that last joke, h
got out OF the room with Sigh
lurch only, and proceeded to get hi
hat.
"Pon me soul ~ be said, as h
craned and mooned over the table
looking for his hat pom me soul
that's the bes' joke | ever heard.
His utterance was rather thick
"Yes, an tho bes' dinner was eve
at" Here he gave lurch, but wa
p, steadied by the waiter in sttendanc
in the hall. At last, after swayin
about for some time, he detected hi
label, and, pouucing upon the ha
containing it, read aloud, "Zekea
Perkins, counslr un--hiccup,--tu
ney-a-law, Hartford, Conctecu
That's my hat
Strengthening himself, he erdea,
ored to put on the article in hi
usual jaunty style. 1t would't d.
lie bent to It, tried both hands, bel
!, it to bis head, fairly trying to fore
bis head in, swsying, rocking, stag
gering the while; but ii wouldn't d
lie was hot and stupe6ed. II
couldn't understand it. Turning I
the waiter, whose gravity had nearl
given way at the gyrations, he sai
With great politeness, "Will yo
'blige me by readiD' what's in ths
hat."
"Celtainly, sir, Ezekiel perkin
Counselor and Attorney at : ls'
Hartford, Conn"
81 knew it! / knew il! That's it.
/, that's my hatw And immsdiatel
began the same performance, b'
with more energy. After some m'
ments Of staggering, pressing, an
pulling, until be was once more
% iever-heat, he again addressed Il
:, servant, and with a still more my
y u tilted air than before, but a deteru
:. ination, as it were, to know Il
T. worst
0. "a beg pardon, but will you !
ID pleased to tell me who / ann"
a "Certainly, sir, ! know you re
y fectly well. You are Mr.. Ezeki