Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1872-05-16
lBrevitfes and Leyittes.

iBrevitfes and LeVitfes..
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@- A Coroner's jury in Wales. lately
held an inquest on the body of convict
who died in the county Jail, and render.
ed a verdict that the way, of the trans,
|Igressor is hard, and the deceased came
to his death by natural causes."a
@- "Susie," said teacher to one ot
her pupils, "you shouldn't make faces
You'll grow up homely if you make
faces. "siSusie looked thougtfully in the
teachers face moment, and then inno-
I Gently asked, "Did you make faces when
\ you was little girl?"Y
! w An Indiana editor makesa pathetic
appeal to his readers, saying; IF. there
is anything you know, that is worth
knowing, that We ought to know we don't
know, please let US know it." ...., ,.,.s..
\ MS- Some one describes philanthro-
pist as d man who loves all mankind and
neglects his own family. .t 81,
@- An exchange says fashionable
young people are calling upon somebody
to invent new dance. Suppose some-
body" invents one wherein the young
lady dances around the house and looks
latter everything. q
i nr A kind physician, living near Bos-
tia poor woman Nhola1 he 8 was attending,
asked her if there was anything he could
do for her before she died. The poor
soul, looking up, replied: "Doctor, 7
have always thought that should like
to have glass butter dish before I died. "
@-.Mark Twain says; Slam different
from Washington, I have higher and
grander standard Of Irincip1e. Wash
ington could not lies I can lie, but I
WON'T"
a-" Madam" said a cross-tempered
physician to patient, if women were,
admitted to paradise their tongues would
make ita purgatory." "And some ply
sicians, if allowed to practice there, re-
piled the lady, would make it a deserts
gD- Our poet was leaning pensvely on
his umbreIlal the other day, when a
friend asked him if he remembered Bry-i|
ants beautiful lines on Autumn. "Yes,"
he remarked, "they so thusly: The
melancholy days have come, the.saddest
of the year when it's too warm for whis-
ky skins, and too oool for lager beer.'
%s- A young man asked a young lady
her age and she replied: "6 times and
7 times added to my age will exceed 6
times and 4, as double my age exceeds
30" The young man said he thought
she looked much older. -
! @- W. As a pig with twisted tail
like thee st in Hamlet2" Because it
could tail unfold.
@s-" Madam, great many persons
were disturbed at the concert last night
by. the crying Of your baby" swell, /
do wonder such people wall go to con-
oertsl"
H- An exchange, wantingto compI-
ment "live stock Journal" says it lis
edited by a man whose head is full OF
live stock. - - W.T. t'a'' .'i' !
~ Thepeople of Wyoming, p, don't
know whether to call their female Judge
q justicess of the peace, 81 or q justice Of
the peacess. .. .,..,.,.,.
9sr When Christians are. just what
they should be-entirely copsecrated to
God, and serving him with q whole heart
sinners will come and be eonyerted,
The attractions will be almost irresisti7
Die. ~ a; ~ Il i,li;; ~ .d i-sAa,; :si!,,
@sA chicken thief on Long island /.
ried to enter the,hen house OF q fa5neraf =
lot. knowing that d big dog was ehainedf
,ear:Dy. His bill at the" nearest apothe-'t p
,ary's for lniment and sticking plaster &,
las been thirty dollars, and he can now 1,
,at on his pantaloons comfortably =
! ase Why is poor doctor ifkc q moleH y
Because you can track him by his III
loles in the ground. Next :, '>''' ii
gs- What is that which which Q man does Z
lot want, and struggles against having
s long as. possible, but which, once got,
en-. he would not part. With for all the
world PA bald head.
N,'lI'.' - = I50l Ii.:fu- .Wr71
~ There's purple half to the the grape,
mellow half to the peach, q sunny " my hal half
. the globe, and "6stter-half'' to man.