Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1872-12-18
Items.

Items.
A man that don't know anything,
will tell it the first time lie gets a
chance. Ir
Next TO the "little busy bee" the
boot black furnishes the brightest ex-
ample of improving the shining hour"
The Chicago Times asks, allow can
we escape froy' The New York
Commercial answers, "The Gospel of
iers you every encouragement"
"Ain't it wicked 10 rob dis roost,
Jim 2" "Dat's great mora! question,
Gumbo; we ain't got time 10 argue it
now; band down another pullet."
Feeling Remsrk--"IIappy is the
country that has no history" as the
schoolboy said on being fogged for
the third time for not knowing who
was Henry the Sixth's wife.
There is a town out West called
Random. A resident of the place be-
ing asked where he lived said he lived
at Random. lie was taken up as a
vagrant.
Ayoung man who ought To be asham-
cd of himself, in commenting on n
fireman's parade, said that wet day
was always favorable for au exhibi-
ton OF hose.
A pupil in one of the public schools
recently revised un old saying found
in his grammar, as follows: alt is
better to give than TO rcceive--a good
licking"
A Georgia paper boasts of nine
ycar-old compositor, who "sets 4,50O
ems day without an error in his
proof" He will recover from that
last symptom Of disease before long /;
it seldom becomes chronic.
A little boy in Brooklyn Sunday
school was asked lately to say which
was the most beautiful verse in the
Bible. After some hesitation, he re-
piled blushingly: "If any man pulls
down the American flag shoot him on
the spot"
A fashion writer says that brides in
good society now a-days avoid most
strictly the traditional gray and brown
travelling suits formerly in voge, and
dress as nnconspicuously as possible,
SO that "all creation needn't know
we've just been married"
Ono of the saddest sights in this
season of the year is young map
who has waited outside the church of
an evening until he is chilled through,
only to sec his girl walk off with some
rascal who has been inside oil the time
toasiing bis sinful shins ut the stove.
"When was Rome built Y asked q
school-committeeman Of the first class
in ancient history. "ln tho night"
answered a bright little girl. ain the
nightw exclaimed the astonished ex-
aminer. "Why, ! thought everybody
knew that Rome wasn't built in a
day"
Judge Mcrrimon, Democrat, was
elected United States Senator from
North Carolina, to succeed Senator
Poole, Radical, whose term expires on
the 4th of March next. Judge Mer.
rimon, being ono of the foremost mon
of the State will ably represent his
constituents. lie was the Democratic
nominee for Governor last September,
and was elected, but counted out
A lady, upon being told q friend
wished to see her, desired her little
daughter, about eight or nine years of
age, to say that she was not in; upon
this, the friend being anxious to have
an interview, asked tho child when
her mother would likely to return
The little thing very lnnocently said,
calling up stairs: mamma, the lady
wishes to know when you will be in"
A German at st Louis lately com
planned TO the Mayor that if the boys
did not stop swimming in the river
where his daughters could see them,
he would make trouble. "Ah Mr..
Schemcrhorn," replied tho Mayor, "if
remember right, your house is moro
than half mile from the river."--
"Yaw, dat is so, den you see, gals dcy
got py-gla-ses."
An innocent Indiana maiden, who
couldn't make her "fcller" come to
time with a gentle hint that she was
willing, went 20 drug store and asked
for ten cents worth of love powders.
The clerk consulted his pharmaceuti.
cal works without relief and finally
from his own resources compounded
Of powdered rhubarb, sweet qoinine,
assafoctida, etc, mixture that will
certainly bring matters TO crisis,
either favorably or otherwise. The
result is yet to hear from.