davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
Opening Remarks In Mark TWain's
Lecture.

LADIES AND GENTLENEN-By, re-
quest Of the chairman Of the commit
tee, who has been very busy, and IL
very tired, Isuppose, ask leave to
introduce to you the lecturer Of the
evening, Mr.. Clemens, otherwise Mark
Twain, gentleman whose great learn
ing, whose historical accuracy, whose
devotion to science, and whnp vener.
alton for the truth Elau0h hAss3gse only
equaled by his moral 1ehazActcf aad his
majestic presence. ERenewed laugh.
ter. refer these vague general terms
to myself. [Giggling.] I am . little
opposed to the custom Of ccremonIous-
ly introducing the lecturer to the audi.
ence, because it seems to me unneces.
sary where the man has been properly
advertised Laughter j and besides it 10
very uncomfortable for the lecturer.
But where 1t IL the custom, an intro
duction ought to be made, and I had
rather make it myself In my own case,
and then I can rely on getting In ali
the facts. TContinued laughter.l II Is
not u simple Introduction that mind.
don't really care for that at all, but
1t Is the compliments that sometimes
go with it-that IL what hurts. It
would make any one omfortablo.
You can fancy young lady introdu.
ced to a parlor-ful OF company a. the
best conversationalist, the best model
In every way, In her section of the
country. You might just as well knock
her In the head. She could not say a
word the rest Of the evening.
never had but one public introduce
ton that seemed exactly the thing;
that seemed to be very inspiration
in the way Of an introduction. The
gentleman had a good head, and he
said he supposed didn't want any
said he was exactly
right, didn't want any compliments.
And when he introduced me he said,
"Ladies and gentlemen, shall not
waste any unnecessary time in the In.
production. don't know anything
about this man [laughterl at least
only know two things about him one
is that he has never been in tho I,enl-
tentiary, and the other Is can't i,n.
agine why" Prolonged laughter.1
Now such an Introduction puts o man
right at ease. Laughter
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

a Philadelphia firm will soon supply
Russia with 500 locomotives.
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

\ sick man ,y.ls told that his wife
would probably marry again. ''All
right" said he, s.thcrc will bc one man
tu tnInnat nay d"ath.'
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

"A 1903 cent brought $G7 80 ut "a recent
sale i'm New York. .
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
.-r. EDUCATIONAL.
0UACHITA FEMALE ACADEMY,


OUACHITA FEMALE ACADEMY,
A BOARDING AND DAY SCHOOL,
FOR YOUNG LADIES',
NROE, LA.
Tho session of 1s71-'7a will commcnc on
Monday, the 4th day of September.
Mrs. r. w. BENTON, Principal, and In
structress of the Primary Department.
TIIoss. o. BENTON, Esq, Instructor of the
Academic Department..
Miss r.. N. .NIICKLE, Instructrcss of French,
and assistant in the English branches.
Mrs. e. J. SLACK, Jnstructress of Music.
Miss M.S.PH1rPEN, 1nstructress i'll Draw
ing, Painting in water colors oil,
broidery and fancy needle work.
TERMS: PAYABLE MoST11Lr)
Primary classes...................s $500 pei, mo.
Middle 90 .................. 400 "
Academic " ............... 500
French 4" ............... 300
Musc{ with use of instrument) 600
Board, including washing,
lights, &C.. ..:................ 1000 ''
chprsss hprswins Painting Aan s ISL ISL at tf
MONROE MALE ACADEMY,
S. c. MCCORMICK, Pn1Sc1rAL.
The exercises in this institution for the
first term, begin on Monday, January 1872.
TERMS PER MONTH:
Urinary 60
intermediate. ........ 60
w
Classical Scientific. 6 90
Incidental ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. %
No deduction will be made except in case
of protracted sickness.
4 liberal patronage, both at home and
abroad is requested.
Board can be had in private families ut
SIS 90 per month.
Tuition payable monthly.
-Four weeks constitute II scholastic month.
Dec. %, 1871. l3:tf
A. LEVY. I. l.. HAAS.
EyY 81 HAAS,
- Formerly Of Cuiu"tbi,, Lu..l
COTTON FACTORS AND GEN ERAI.
COMMISSION MERCHANTS,
No. A. Ierliln street. New Orleans.
ovlS- ST. Y
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
No action taken.
The House then adjourned.
THE wAnMOTu MOVEMENT.

Finding himself minus six support
crs in the House, tho Governor con-
vollcd an "cXtra session. Of the Con
cral Assembly, to meet at 4:3O D. m .
on the 4th. His partisans met at the
hour, there being Il large police force
and some militia ut hand. It will be
seen that tho first extraordinary"
business to dispose OF was to get rid Of
Carter, ana to elect his Successor:
STATE Or LOUISIANA, EXECrTIVE
DErAHTM MENT,
New Orleans, Jan. j, 1872, l:3D u. NJ.
Whereas, Il conspiracy has developed
itself to overflow the Government by
unlawful and revolutionary means,
which was shown by arrest Of the Gov
crnor. Licutcncnt Governor, and Il
number of Senators and members of
the House OF Representatives ut the
moment OF assembling, by L. s. -,Iur-
Shal, on Il writ Of Il L. :. Commission
or upon IL false and frivolous charge ;;
and
Whereas, while these said officers
and members of the General Assembly
were detained in arrest, an illegal and
revolutionary attempt was made h
eject certain members Of the House OF
Representatives aud scat other person.,
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
A. l.. Slack.

4 TTORNEY AT LAW and Commits
~ sioner for Texas. Office Wood Street,
Monroe, La. Prompt attention given to col
iections in North Louisiana. Aug. %, 6S.5:1 IL
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

G. W.cMcCranie, -.
e 4 TTORNEY AT LAW, MONROlJ, La,
~ will practice in Ouachita and adjacent
parishes and in the Supreme Court at Mon
roe. June II, 1871.
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
Il. RICHARDSON. JAS. ID. Nr'fNEI
Richardson 4 IcEner

4 TTORNEYS AT LAW, Monroe, La,
IL practice in all the Parishes of North
Louisiana, i'll the Supreme Court at Monroe,
tho Federal Co:rts, and i'll the Land Office
department CT the General Government.
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13
JOHN NJ EMERY. .---4 .Is' S. d. M'ENERY.
j. & 3. ID. McEuery.

A TTORNEYS AT LAW, Monroe, La,
n practice in the Parish and District
Courts of Ouachita, NIorehouse, Frankln,
Kichland, Caldwell and Catahoula Parishes,
in the Supreme Court at Monroe, and Uni
]ed States Courts. Particular attention paid
to business in the Land Office Department
of the General Government. nl7tf
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

Z. n. MORRISON. w. w. FARMER.
Morrison 4 Farmer,
4 TrORNEYS AT LAW, Monroe, La.,
~ will practice in the Courts of the Pa
rishes OF Ouachita, Morehouse, RichIand,
Franklin and Caldwell, in the Supreme
Court, and i'll the United States Courts
Will also attend to all business intrusted to
them in the State and Federal Land Offices.
n4lv3
The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1872-01-13

E ISAIAH GARRETT. FRANKLIN CARR EFT.
Garrett & Garrett,
"A T~rOiNEYS AT LAW, corner Wood
~ and st. John Streets, Opposite Record
er's ofiice) Monroe, La. Jan. l, 1871. ly
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
The Influence Of NeWSpapers.

Show us an intelligent family of boys
and girls, and we will show you a
family where newspapers and periodi-
Gals are plentiful. Nobody, who has
been without these silent private tutors,
can know their educational power for
good and for evil. Have you never
thought of the innumerable topics of
discussion which they suggest at the
breakfasttable, the most important
public measures, with which, thus
early, our children become Familiarity
acquainted great philanthropic ques-
tons of the day, to which unconsciously
their attention is awakened, and the
general spirit of intelligence which is
evoked by these quiet visitors? Any
thing that makes home pleasant, cheer
full and chatty thins the haunts of vice
and the thousand and one avenues of
temptation, should certainly be regard.
ed, when we consider its influence on
the mind Of the young as a great moral
and social blessing.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
The Perils OF the Sea.

The loss of the coasting schooner
White Swan, on the rocky shore of
MATTHIAS Vineyard last Monday, fur
nishcs q tale of suffering and heroism
which ought not 10 pass unnoticcd.
The vessel was small one, OF only III
tons, and was on its way from Calais 10
New York. The gale of Monday night
drove her on the reef which makes out
from Cape Poge, and early in the morn
ing she struck about third of a mile
from shore. Six men were on board of
her, and, unable to make any effort to
save themselves, they chung to the rig
ging, while the freezing water con.
tinually broke over them. The wreck
was seen at dawn from the shore, and a
boat was brought from a town some
miles distant with which to attempt
their rescue. The sea, however, ran so
high that il was madness to think of
launching the boat. All day Tuesday,
and through the long night that fol.
lowed, the shipwrecked men were ex-
posed TO the cold, the fierce wind, and
the icy water that swept over them. On
Wednesday, a steamer wls got under
way from Vineyard Haven, and started
through the heavy ice of the Sound to
make an effort to save them. A whale
boat was carried on the steamers deck,
and on nearing the wreck it was
launched and manned by six stout men,
who, at the imminent hazard of their
lives, and after suffering severely from
the cold, succeeded in saving the entire
crew of the wrecked schooner. The
rescued men were all badly frozen, and
had been for twenty-eight hours ex-
posed TO the bitterest cold and the ap.
parent certainty of death; while the
boats crew that rescued them was also
frostbitten, none of its members escap.
ing without frozen fingers or ears.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
Coffee i'm California.

The Aha California says: A CORE.
spondent who has had experience in the
cultivation Of coffee in Java, at an eleva-
ton of 1900 feet above the sea, where
the banana would not bear fruit and
the sugar cane would not grow, and
where the climate is colder than on our
Southern coast, writes TO us that he is
confident a coffee plantation of 300
acres, well managed, would pay well in
California. He would send TO the
mountains Of Java for the plants, at
cost Of 1000, set out 1920 on an acre,
in timber land, so that the trees would
shade the young plants, cultivate them
three years at an expense Of $4,000,
and in the third year harvest a full crop
Of 5000 pounds per acre, worth for the
entire plantation 100000 or 100000.
He says that in Java where the Govern
ment, which owns most of the coffee
has allowed private indi-
viduals to 20 into the business, they have
made extraordinary profits.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
The Red River Raft.

"Gath," writing from Washington
10 the Chicago Tribune, has the follow
ing mention Of plan 10 get around the
Instructions in the Red River;
Every now and then We have petit
ton OF some sort asking Government
help in money 10 get the great raft out
of the Red River. The last of these is
comparatively modest request for
$4,000, not to take up the whole raft,
but simply 10 open passage way along
one side OF it, 50 that the products OF
900 miles above, in Texas, Louisiana,
and Arkansas may come down.
The river is navigable some 700 miles
above this raft; but the banks, for
nearly the whole distance, are const antly
caving in and carrying into the stream
trees and timber in vast quantities., and
this enormous supply mas actually
driven out of cultivation and habitation
seventy.five miles OF plantation above
the head of the raft. The whole bed Of
the Red River, from top to bottom, is
filled with timber for twenty-five miles,
and these submerged logs are often
covered with luXrIant growth of weeds
and bushes, so that the Red River can
not be seen at all. Meantime bayoux
are formed on both sides, and, by pre-.
carious canals connecting these acct
dental lakes, sort of curious naviga-
ton is now carried on,-every canal
builder taking toll on the freight that
passes by him. Meanwhile, another
Big Raft Company is laying wait for
Congress, asking permission to tax all
the trade on the river, in consideration
of undertaking the job of removing the
raft. The signers Of the more modest
petition, now in my hand, make the
important assertion, that neither would
it be possible to break up the Red River
Raft altogether, as long as there is q
supply of timber above, nor to remove
the muddy bars from the mouth of the
Mississippi, which are naturally formed,
and which will always be formed, at the
Balizc. The Red River Raft makes
sometimes half mile Of solid wooden
embargo per diem. At one place, below
Grand Ecore the river has maize a new
channel of over forty miles ia length
within few years, and there are some
indications that it may change It's course
and finally discharge through
the Sabine RIVER, instead OF continuing
down to the Mississippi.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
A Good Example.

The sturdy little Kingdom of Wur-
temburg has come to the conclusion
that foreign relations are a luxury that
it can no longer afford 10 indulge in.
Measures have been taken by the Cham
Der Of Deputies 10 abolish the Legations
to all countries except Bavaria, Ger
many, and Russia. At the same time,
the Foreign Department is to be cur
tailed, with a view to its ultimate abo-
lition, the duties to be attached to one
of the other portfolios. In the matter
Of dispensing with foreign Ministers, is
is not clear but that the example of
Wurtemberg might be prohtably fol-
lowed by larger nations. Such a policy
is the logical deduction from the action
of our Congress in consolidating the
missions 10 the Central American States,
and it would not be surprising if an
other decade should see a radical reform
throughout the world in the diplomatic
system, which, it must be admitted, is
relic Of time when the facilities for
international communication were far
less extensive than they are now.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
XOman's Hair.

DR.. Benz. Godfrey has written a book
on the diseases of the Hair" He
says that a voman's hair may grow to
the length of six feet, and that young
lady of Massachusetts refused a thou.
sand for her " cranial covering, which
was only one inch short of this measure
ment." Four hundred hairs Of average
thickness would cover an inch of space.
The blonde belle has about one hun ired
and forty thousand tilaments to comb
and brush, while the r. d-haired beauty
has to be satisfied with eighty-eight
thousand; the brown-haired damsel
may have one hundred and nine thou
sand the black haired but one hundred
and two thousand. Few ladies consider
that they carry some forty or fifty miles
of hair on their head the fair haired
may even have to dress seventy miles Of
threads of gold every morning. A Ger
man experimentalist has proved that a
single hair will suspend four ounces
without breaking, stretching under the
process and contracting again. But the
hair thus heavily weighted must be
dark brown, for the blonde breaks down
under two and half ounces.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
Proceedings i'm Congress.

In the Senate on the 18th bill was
passed authorizing survey, and marking
of the boundary line between the United
States and the British Possessions from the
Lake of the Woods to the summit of the
Rocky Mountains...Th The remainder of the
session was taken up with the discussion of
Mr. Conklings reso luton as to recommen-
dations for Office by the Senators from New
York, Illinois, Missouri and Nebraska.
In the House on the same day a bill was
passed providing that minors shall not be
enlisted in the military service without the
consent of their parents or guardians......A
bill was passed granting the Davenport and
ST. Paul railroad right of way over the Gov
eminent Rock Island lIll.) brid e, the com
pany to contribute one third of the expenses
OF maintaining the bridge.....The House then
went into Committee of the Whole on the
Postofice Appropriation bill, which was
discussed until adjournment.
In the Senate on the 18th the bill FOR
the erection public buildings at st. Louis
was passed. The Legislative Appropria-
ton bill was taken up. An amendment
was adopted increasing the salaries Of
United States District Judges and the
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
The Austrian Navy.

For some years past the navy Of Aus
tria has not been such favorite with
the educated classes of that country as
it once was, and so many old officers
have left the service that at present the
old personnel is but22 per cent. of what
it was in 1854, the remainder being all
new men. Its marine force consists of
As ships carrying 434 guns. Four of
these vessels are ironclad casemated
boats, four are transports, one torpedo
vessels, two yachts, two practice brigs,
one floating workshop, two transport
schoopers, and four unarmed steamers.
There are 800 officers in active service,
As on land service, clergymen, GO sur.
geons, GO engineers, If theoretical teach
ers, 8 photographic officers. 7 auditors,
and 279 warrant oflicers-9i4 in all.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29

Judges of the Court Of Claims TO $1,000, and
the bill passed. 1.-The Tariff bill was dis
cussed without action.....Adj ourned.
In the House on the same day bill was
passed approprating 1897 600 to reimburse
Kansas for her expenditures in equippug,
subsisting, and paying troops a
bill authorizing the Southern Claims
Commission to appoint special com
missioners TO take testimony, was
pas ed ..... Mr.. Garfield, from the Con-
ference Committee on the bill for the St.
Louis Custom House, made a report appro-
priating $500 900 for the site, and s750,000
for the building. The report was agreed to
and the House adjourned.
In the Senate on the 18th bill was
passed authorizing the President to appoint
a Paymaster General in the army ..... The
House bill extending the time for the COM
pletion Of the Portage and Lake Superior
Canal was passed 1.-THE remainder of the
session was occupied with the discussion Of
the Tariff bill.
In the House on the 18th the Wisconsin
Land Grant bill was taken up. A substi-
tute was adopted by vote of 90 to IS, pro-
viding that all lands granted by Congress
in $50 and 1864 for lands for tie construc-
ton Of the st. Croix and Lake Superior rail
road, such grants having expired by limi-
tallOn, are declared forfeited TO the United
tates, and shall henceforward be subject TO
homestead entry and settlement under the
Homestead act Of the Goth of May, 1871 and
that ne part of such lands shall be selected
by or inure to the benefit OF any railroad
company under any assumed grant from the
United States, aud that no land embraced
in the grant To the st. Croix Railroad Com
pany shall in any case revert TO the North
ern Pacific Railroad Company, and repeal
ing all acts or parts of acts inconsistent with
this provision. The bill as thus amended
was passed, and the House adjourned.
There was no session of the Senate
on the 10th.
In the House on the 10th the attendance
was slim, and no business was transacted be-
yond the reading or filing of speeches on
miscellaneous subjects.
In the Senate on the 18th Mr.. Conk
ling's resolution calling for the number of
applications for appointments made by GER
tain Senators came up. An amendment to
include the Senators from Indiana was ac-
cepted by Mr.. Conkling, and the resolution
as amended was adopted. Chicago
Relief bill was taken up, but the Senate adj
journed without reaching a vote.
In the House on the 18th, after the intro
ducton of several new bills, the Senate bill
to contract with the proprietors of the Con-
greSSt0nGi Globe for reporting and publishing
the long debates in Congress for two years,
was taken up, but the House adjourned with
out disposing of the bill.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
A Corner Oh COppers.

The London newsboys have been vic
timized 10y a shrewd operator in copper.
For some months he busted himself i'm
collecting quantities of the penny of
1864, and then started the report that the
pennies Of that year were too good, gold
having 10y mistake entered into their
composition, and that the Postofiice
would give sixpencc apiece for them
The bait took, and, as favor. he al
lowed a number OF newsboys to buy out
his ock at fivepence apiece. The vic.
tins of this corner" besieged the Post
office Tor hours, only to be finally con.
WINGED that their friend had sold pen.
MES and buyers alike.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
The Bowels Of the Earth.

Sir William Thomson, the distin-
guished physicist, has written in regard
to the alleged internal fuidity of the
earth, in which he maintains the view
that the earth, as whole, is less yield
ing than globe of glass of the same di.
mansions and exposed to the same
forces. He thinks that volcanic phe.
nomena, instead of furnishing evidence
that the outer crust of the globe in
closes liquid interior, tend rather to
an opposite conclusion, when fully in
yestigated.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
Mammoth Cave Fishes.

Wilbur +. Parker of Meriden, Conn,
has three eyeless fish taken from the
Mammoth cave. They are alive, quick
as lightning, and almost white in color.
The specimens are about two inches in
length, though the fish frequently reach
six and eight inches. In shape they
are something like "bullhead. Mr..
Parker also found specimens of craw
fish looking like white Holsters. These
are also blind, and white in color.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
A Dignilied BODY,

A visitor to the Supreme Court of the
United States says: Facing the door
as you enter, on raised platform, in
silken robes, sit the nine Judges-sup-
posed to be the most dignilied tribunal
in America-and have no doubt it is,
Notwithstanding have seen one of the
Judges eat an apple with great gusto
while seated on the bench, and another
partake of molasses candy, and after
the repast lick every one of hi. ten
fingers with great satisfaction.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1872-03-29
Terrible Boiler Explosion.

One Of the most terrific and III some
respects one of the most remarked eX-
plosions in the whole history of casual.
ties occurred on Monday afternoon at
Cincinnati, .. Two steam boilers in
the soap and candle factory Of Messrs.
Woods * Canadian exploded with an
unhesrd-of violence. In the factory
were about eighty persons. Two of
these were horribly mangled and in
stantly killed, and four slightly wound
ed. All the others escaped. On Bay
miller street, over a half milo distant by
map measurement, three little girls in a
front yard were jumping rope. Sixteen
feet OF one OF the boilers was hurled all
that distance over the house tops upon
their heads. Two of them were killed
instantly and the third mortally
wounded This piece of the boiler is "a
perfect cylinder sixteen feet four inches
long, ana twenty-four inches in dame
ter, and weighs about ton. Persons
who saw it say it looked like stove
pipe sailing III the air just above the
roofs. The other boiler was hurled
through a wall Of brick foot in thick
ness, and several feet of earth, into
Providence street, where it lodged.
This boiler would have careered east
wardly over the city as the other did
westwardly but for.this obstruction. A
portion OF one OF the boilers, about ten
feet long, was blown perpendicularly up
in the air, and fell back in about the
spot it started from, burying itself several
feet in the ground.
Notwithstanding the terrific force of
the eXplosio. the adjacent buildings
were but slightly injured. The cause Of
the explosion is not known, but an in
yestigation will be had.