Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1872-02-01
CURRENT PARAGRAPHS.
MiNelianeOus.


Five hundred million dollars worth of
property is owned by women in the United
States.
A Maine woman has swallowed two
hundred and seventy bottles OF cherry pee
toral and still lives.
A coroners jury recently declared a
man to have been severely frozen to
death
10. Dick, go long" was what an
urchin asked for at the apothecarys. he
had been sent for eau de cologne.
Said Bloggs the other day when APP
piled to for loan of ten dollars
have only five lending tens, and they're
all out"
Ma. this milk is better than yester-
DAYS milk was" Don't say that, child ;
saw there's more milk in this water than
there was in the water we got yesterday"
The Washington Star ungallantly an
nounces that ''young ladies, as a general
rule, partake more heartily of supper at
an evening entertainment than the young
men,
The japanese make paper which
bears any amount OF soaking without IN
iury. Just the material on which to print
shares of corporations that take frequent
occasion to water their stock.
A bloodthirsty individual named
GRAY has introduced a bill into the Cali
fornia Legislature, providing that each
CITY, at its own expense, shall bury the
INDECENT sick"
Why should l take policy in the
Washington Life Insurance Company :?
Because death is certain, and every dollar
so invested will be paid to NY family
when they need it most.
New Hampshire has three hundred
persons between the ages of ninety and
ninety-fve years, ten who are ninety
eight, two who are ninety-nlne, and
six who are one hundred and upwards.
The latest on H. G.. is that while in
Danburv, Conn, recently, hearing it stat
ed that 5000 pounds of cheese had been
made from sixteen cows, he at once re-
paired to the slaughter house to see how
it was done.
Mistress" By the way, Anna
Hannah-is your name, Anna or nan-
hah ?" New Cook (tartlyp-" Which my
name is Anna, mum-Haich, Ha, Hen,
Hen. Ha, Haich,-'Anna' Mistress (giv-
ing it up in despair)-"Ah Thank you"
Punch.
AT a wedding in Rochester, recently, a
nice lowered cake was most horribly multi
ated by an old gentleman who mistook it
for dish of mashed pc atoes and thrust
a spoon into it with the remark, g will
next carve the potatoes"
The New York Commercia1 says: "Of
all the dirty looking jolly tars that ever
landed at this port, those of His Imperial
Majesty the Gar of Russia, are about the
drtiest. They are so to that degree that
it would be an objectionable barbarity to
wash them while the cold weather lasts"
"A Connecticut farmer sold lamb to
a butcher at certain price per pound,
with the agreement that a quarter of the
animal should be returned to him after
killing. The butcher charged the farmer
retail price, and, on striking the balance,
the latter found himself indebted to the
cunning butcher by the operation.
A Charlestown, Mass, photographer
gives striking instance of feminine arti-
flee. While arranging the instrument
preparatory to taking young ladys pic
ture, he suddenly turned to give some di-
rections to his fair customer when, to his
establishment, he beheld her busily en-
gagged stuffing her cheeks with paper to
fill out the meagre proportions which ma
ture had so rudely neglected.
The Lacon Home Journal says: "Thir-
ty years ago, when the country from the
Illinois to Spoon River was an unsettled
waste, William Fem hired Frank Drake
to pillow twenty mile furrow from Spar
land to Wyoming, that customers from
the former place could find their way to
r anon n ruac tho ppuacf a6y N
line we ever heard Of"
The New Haven Register says: "FrOm
the will of General Blackett, Governor of
Plymouth, proved 1881: I desire my
body to be kept SO long as it may not be
offensive, and that one of my fingers or
toes may be cut off to secure a certainty
of my being dead. further request my
dear wife that, as she has been troubled
with one old fool, she will not think of
marrying second From the will of the
Rev. Appleby, of st. Brides, proved in
1888: 1 leave my body to be dressed in
a flannel waistcOat, an old surtout coat,
and breeches without lining and pockets;
no shoes (have done walking), and worsted
wig, if one can be got, in order that l
may rest comfortable
Some years since gentleman, some
what of literary character, whom we
will call by no particular name, married
young lady by no means famous for her
intellectually. In the course of time the
happy pair were rejoiced by the advent of
an heir, which grew and thrived for
season, but after while began to grow
sickly. The father noticing the unmethod-
ical manner in which the mother managed
the baby, told her one day that its illness
was owing to mismanagement. A physi-
clan being called, gave the same opinion.
A day or two afterward one of the
neighbors called in to inquire after the
child, and asked, "What is the matter
with it?" "Oh," said the mother, "my
husband and the doctor say it's got the
mismanagement"