Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1872-02-05
A Fenian over the water was called
on for toast. He cave the following:
'All hail the American aigle.
Proud bird of freedom. all hail
The fowl that no one cln inyaigle,
OR put salt on his beautiful tall

The fowl that one cln inYagle
Or put salt on his beautiful tall
One of the best things said 10y Josh !.
Billings, in his last s.Alminax, is this:
Eight won't go into six and have any
thing left over. Many young fellow
has found this out BY trying to get a
number six boot on
A young lad who broke through the
ice while skating at Lake View, N. J..
supposing that he had got to drown,
shouted as he went under the street and
number of his residence. Fortunately
he was rescued and the world will be
likely to hear from the precious youth
hereafter.
BUTLER FOR THE NEXT PRESIDENT
A large number of women were in the
house galleries Jan. "a, spite of the cold,
to hear General Butler present the petit
ton of $4,000 of their sisters for de-
claratory act in accordance with the
Woodruff discovery. Mr.. Butler did
the thing handsomely, and the ladies
evidently were delighted One of them
exclaimed, after it was done: "If con-
gress passes a declaratory act, Butler
will be the next president" which was
safe prediction.
The subject of impression at first
sight was being talked over at the
tea-table, when the lady whose duty
it was to preside, said, "she always
formed an idea of person at first
sight, and generally found it to be cor
rect" "Mamma," said her youngest
son, in a shrill voice, that attracted
the attention of all present. DWELL,
my dear. what is it," replied the
good mother. Il want to know what
was your opinion when you first saw
me?" The question gave a sudden
turn to the conversation.
A stranger passing through certain
street was sliced by touter at a cloth
ing shop, who, without ceremony, pulled
him into the shop, and began putting up
his fine ready-made clothing. Being old
and infrm he made little resistance, but
asked the man if he was master of the
place. ''No, SIR said the touter, 'but
[ will bring him Immediately" The
man returned with his master, to whom
the stranger put the same question
care you master Of this shop, sir?''
Eyes, sir, what can I do for you?'' "On-
ly,' he replied, 'just hold your man a
minute, while [ go OUT
LITTLE THINGs.-The perspicuousness
of little things was never more beauti-
fully expressed than in the following
moroccan from Mr.. B. E. Taylor:
Little martin boxes of homes are gen
orally the most happy and cozy; little
villages are nearer to being atoms of a
shattered paradise than anything We
know of; little fortunes bring the most
content, and little hopes the least disap
pointment.
Little words are the sweetest; little
charities fly the furthest, and remain the
. longest on the wing little lakes arr
the stillest little hearts the fullest, anc
little farms the best titled.
Little books are the most read ant
little songs the most loved.
If all our troubles were single fey
men would complain of them. But whel
they come in focks and crowds the
people cry out against them. But d
they not always come single, and do W
not keep them, and pile them up, an,
put yesterday trouble upon to-day's, an,
anticipate the troubles of tomorrow, un
til we break down under them. Tront
f les do not come in packs, like hounds
but come single, and can be met one b
, one and conquered or borne A WOOD
pile cannot be carried in the arms, br
seperate it into single sticks and chill
l can say it it, ''Be thou removed to yondt
! place." and it shall be done So troubl
in bulk, cannot be borne, but troubl
taken as it comes day by day, is ballas
; keeping the mind steady when the gale
stifen and send US on with a quickt
I motion on the roughened waters.
A FIRsT-RATE PUFF.-A large dr.
: goods establishment was recently burne
down in this city, when one Of the larg
: fre-safe manufacturers of New Yorl
who knew they had one of their article
? in the building, wrote on, and requisite
the proprietors of the ruined store
e state how their safe had withstood I'll
; confagration. The answer was as 70
4 lows: Gentlemen, your safes are wo1
derful. Nothing can surpass them Fl
protecting books and papers. thoug
! they have some unfortunate opposite e
! fects. One of our clerkr, on Saturda,
: bought a Shanghai rooster, and at nigh
! unknown to us, put it for safe keepir
I in the safe That night our establisl
J ment was destroyed by fire, and the sa
and its contents were exposed to tn
: mendous heat for thirty-six hours, at IL
a end of which time it was hoisted out II
+: hot As soon as possible it was opene,
o when. you may judge of our surpris
e when we found within the Shangh
l. rooster leaning against the ledger, FIR
zen to death !''-1Sptrit ot'he Times.
b AN ACCOMMODATING SPIRIT.-In
q certain New England parish, dlf1lcul
if arose about the location of the ne
,e meeting house, and the church was re-
" with the division The pastor at leng
! preached melting sermon on the su
" ject of union, and the congregation we
dissolved in tears. The next mornil
Deacon Jones went over early to see b
! opponent, Deacon Shaw, to make an ear
! est effort for peace, and the followil
7 ensued
: Deacon J.-"Deacon Shaw, hav'l
y slept a wink last night-and I've con
= over to see if we can't have peace on til
= subject of the meeting house we mu
u settle the difficulty
Deacon Swell, I'm very hapl
: to hear YOU talk so, for to tell the trut