The Portland daily press., 1872-06-29
THE PRESS
SATURDAY MORNING, JUNE 20, 1879.
News, Gossip and Editorial Notes.

|
SATURDAY MORNING, JUNE 20, 1872.
News, Gossip and Editorial Notes.
Inc following was speech by successful
competitor for prize for foot-race: Gentle
men, | have won this cup by the use Of ofmy
legs; L trust I may never lose the use of my
legs by the use of this cup.
A bakers dozen of Vermont spinsters re-
Gently ayailed themselves of leap years oppor-
tunity to make an excursion to Wyoming in
pursuit Of matrimony, but discovered to their
disgust that there was no chance of compet-
ing with the Epauper labor of the native
squaws.
The leader of some California robbers al
lowed clergyman he was about to plunder
to keep his money and valuables, on the
promised condition that he would pray the
worth of them for the band and its chief.
Seventeen pleasure-trips to the United
States have been arrangedin in Germany. The
average expense for the whole trip, including
hundred thalers. The visitors will arrive in
this country mostly in August. They start
from Cologne and Hamburg. an q a
A woman makes herself. and her lover an
exception to the race. Collia, lying in her
| lovers arms, wonders how Claudia can per
NIT her dearest friend to touch her hand.
AS grand finale to his Jubilee, Gilmore
has now in preparation first-class boiler ex-
ploslon, No charge for reserved seats.
The Sdrdtogidn has private reasons for be-
lieving that if the Democracy endorse the
Cincinnati ticket they will have "sold them
selves for song" The consideration refer
red to is probably "The Song of the Schurz."
Wonder if Amadeus ever thinks of Max
imilian? 9d
Mr.. David R. Atchison, who became fa-
nous in "border rufian' times, has come
out for Greeley. He forgiyes good deal of
abuse for the sake of Cheating Grant,
Postmaster Marsh of Forest Lake, Pa, has
been on rampage lately. He tried to kill
his daughter with knife, and threatened to
shoot the neighbors who interfered to save
her. The inhabitants of the place do not
dare to go to the post-office for their mails,
and temporary post-office will be establish
ed elsewhere. ia - ' a-
An enthusiastic correspondent of Peoria
weekly writes in praise of the management of
fbo T,,Ix
side P. S. Gilmore could sustain successfully
such diverse and difficult roles?'' We know
of q man who sustained two hard rolls at
| once, on his first appearance in Philadelphia
His name was B. Franklin. He had one un-
der each arm. od@ 9n
The first dispatches which reached Ger
many about the nomination at Cincinnati
said that Florence Gapleg'' had been nomi-
mated for President of the United States;
| and the unfortunate German Journalists were
at their wits ends to know who it was.
The other day an excited individual accost-
ed a street gamin with the question: '.Say,
bub, which is the quickest way for me to get
to the railroad depot?' ''Runp' was the re-
sponse.
Truth in jest-On the order of proceedings
at Cambridge, Wednesday, General Grant
was described in solemn Latin as U-li1-en.
ofss1s Sf5es 911y to dnasff hsssf stsy,S -
rh1 Ana s.dsst sas ma man but sups,
Large is his debt t
That fingers out the day.
.ft He that goes soonest n. r
Has the least to pay. -
Epi'dph from GreUrier's Churchyard.
The Paris Figaro is prosecuted for having
| published humorous article on the death of
President Thiers's favorite dog, Kiki. Kiki
| expired in his fourteenth year.
An unhappy sub-editor in Atlanta ex-
presses the sorrows of the situation in the
following pathetic language: ''When the
thermometer ranges among the nineties, and
you're frantically trying to keep from spon-
taneous combustion by getting on the north
west side of the ''Worcester's Unabridged-'
at moments of such warmth Of feeling it is
| perhaps little sadder than tears, to have the
chief editor incidentally remark, ''By the
way, couldn't you write up something funny
for tomorrow mornings paper?" After in
credible exertion you write something with
rather idiotic and pointless witticism neatly
inserted somewhere-and fatter yourself that
man might smile little at tiff he were a
! particular friend of the family Next MORN
ing It appears in print-the intelligent COM
positor has completely spoiled your little joke
-and in deep anguish of mind you take to
| writing premature obituaries of all the promi-
nent citizens of the place, or a heavy article
on the protective tariff question. 1'9ai