The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1872-02-27
50 PER ANNUNf.


The certain way to he cheated is tn
fancy ones self more cunning than
others.
81 caught her softly by the arm, my
gentle blue-eyed Kate she squealed
Let go you cussed fool, you hurt my
vaccinate"
The English say we do not dine in
America-wc 60 to the table and wor-
ry down our food as if for a wager,
aud hence indigestion and dyspepsia
Too true.
"The strongest propensity in a wo-
mans nature" says careful student
of the sex, "is to want, to know what
is going ON, ami the next is to boss the
job.
A prodigal son writes from
Omaha; 81 have to have my only
shirt washed by the dozen, for it is in
as many pieces, and the smallest hole
is the enc put my head through"
a woman being asked what was her
husbands S occupation, sail he was en-
gagged in finishing" 1t was subse-
quently ascertained that it was term
in pententiary to which she referred.
The following notice, printed on
colore1 Gard boards, with nice bor
der, hangs up in a place of business
in Rome, New York: "Mebbe you
don't peter had loaf roundt here, ven
you don't got some peesnis, amt it?'
"Molly, shut the door; it's getting
awful cold in here!" was the remark
of an Albsny husband as he hung his
coat on a hitching post, aud prepared
to retire on the curbsteue, under the
impression that he had arrived at
home,
A chap, the ether day, asked his
sweetheart if be might he permitted to
cncircle her in mis- arms, and give her
an afiectionate hug. "No," said she, 81
can't allow that, bul I'll tell you what
| will do; I'll split the difference with
you you may kiss me-"
The Nowich Bulletin says: A Frank
lin street gentleman aud his wife had
little argument Christmas eve, when
he kindly said he would hang up her
stockings for her, which he did, but
inadvertently omitted to take her out
Of them. She stood on her head nine
minutes, when the neighbors arbilrat-
ed.
Here are some journalistic courtesies:
The HARTFORD Post is again swapping
at the IrateAer. John, hand us the
squirt-gun.- Boston Traveller.
Now, then, the Boston TrdUel'er is
going to have some editorial matter.
They've sent John for the editor,
Hartford Post.
An ingenious scoundrel recently
cheated a Southport Comm bank out
Of 500, by asking for change for a
500 bill, receiving it, and then asking
in an off hand sort of way, "Well,
nint you going 10 give me that hill ?
The cashier unwittingly gave him the
bill aud was too busy to find out his
mistqkc until after the swindler had
left.
Two gentlemen in Georgia got into
a fight, the one armed with a shot.gun
and the other with an axe. The
friends OF the gentleman who fought
with the axe turned ont in large num-
hers to the funeral, and all united in
the verdict, that for long range fight.
ing the shotgun possessed advantages
over the axe that nught TO bring shot
guns into public favor.
The natives Of northern Siberia
practice polygamy to an unlimited eX-
tent. The women are taken on prnha-
tion, and if they fail to suit are sent
back to their parents, and in case of
infdelity tn their liege lord, a portion
Of the offenders nose is forfeited for
the crime. A traveller in that region
says very naively that whole noses are
comparatively rare among the women
of that country,
do you allow any reduction to
minister's said young lady to a sales,
man in weTi known sewing machine
agency oh Washington street, Bostun,
the other day, where she had been try,
ing to drive bargain. "Oh, yes, al
wavs. Are you minister's wife ?"
"Oh, no, I'm not married. said the Ia,
dv. blushing. '"Daughter, then 2:
"No." The salesman, looked puzzled.
"l'm engaged to Theological student,"
The reduction was made.
The estimates of the number who
perished in the great fire have varied
from 200 to 500. But when il is re-
membered that the hot breath Of con
fiagration withcred to ashes great
cubes Of building.stone, and then blew
the ashes out into the lake, it is sadly
probable that many human bodies SIt-
tered precisely the same fate. Over