, 1872-03-28
- At the knees. A trihe. :"

- At the knees. A tIife.' ..
ITO remember ones troubles in such
scene is weak"
"To forget ones trousers is mad
ness," whispered, with clenched teeth
in his ear. -l s..-f-,f
"One's s--r' calculated Shelton,
family, as he turned upon ME coun-
tenance naturally wan and lengthy, but
now whitene5 and elongated with real
alarm You-don't mean-- Do I
distinctly understand" ..
"You understand my reason for re-
quiring as large portion of the table,
cloth as you can conveniently spare
My friend gazed at me sorowfully.
$50 fair abover' he murmured. $50
well, so singular below! Who now,
in this brilliant assembly-graeed, as
precelve, with the presence Of many
beautiful (and giggllng) women-would
imagine that you, sitting here 50 wei
got up, radiant with artificial mirth, are
type of Millions SIM"
lawfully lucky for you, my boy.
there's tobe no speech making!" con-
tinued Shelton. 1--WE would have had
you on your defencless legs in NO time
"Have you seen the toast list gentle
men?" asked portly member of the
guild, on my left, as he politely offered
a card.
At the same moment note was
placed in my hand. 1t was from the
chairman.
"Oblige US. We know your ready
eloquence. Baron struck with your
face and manner. Wishes to hear you
speak. Touch up the lions
Snatching up my peneil-case, wrote:
''Throat impracticable. Uvula cut off
this morning. Should create more
astonishment than interest if forced
upon my legs" .
I breathed. That peril was averted.
My spirits rose as the merry feast pro-
ceeded, and / began to see more dis
tinctly the humorous side of my little
misadventure, The atmosthere was
warm and pleasant. Why, I had been
present at many dinner in the north
where men dined, from preference,
without their--that is, in kits. True,
1 had not exactly kilt; but, even were
1 compelled to stand forth from my
present retirement, the exhibition of
knee, the publication of calf, would be
no greater than is legally sanctioned
within five hundred miles of this spot.
Ha sensation. "Pray silence"
&c. Grace. "Non nobis." Then the
usual loyal toasts, and we drank pros
perity to several collateral branches of
the reigning house (the Lumpeters were
nothing if not loyaI, before we arrived
al the great toast of the evening-the
Baron de Bette Fauve. This was given
by the chairman himself ard, with the
baron's reply Tin French), and counter
proposition of the health of the ladies,
was received with the greatest enthus-
iasm.
The excitement was just settling down,
"Hallo p exclaimed Shelton. ''what's
up now Is any one expected, I WON
der They are putting big velvet
chair next to Bete-Fauve. 1t must be a
swell. Can the Prince Of
$50 long as it is not intended for my
humble person, I replied with an easy
smile, 1 am perfectly"
81 beg your pardon, Mr.. Charters,
said the voice of the head-stewart, who,
followed by two attendant walters, had
approached us unobserved. 1.-THE
chair, sir, presents his compliments.
and begs you will do him and the Baron
de Bete-Fauve the honor to occupy the
seat that has been placed for you be-
tween them
Ny heart stood still. My hair rose.
A chill OF horror shot through me.
"The baron, sir, speaks no English,
and though him and the chair has been
hard at it all dinner, neither of them
has understood word" said the stew
ard. confdentially. "The chair. sir,
and the company, generally. would all
with pleasure the spectacle of your in
PRODUCTION to the baron"
"The baron be -" know not what
I was about to say. My voice faltered.
I had caught glimpse of the fair occu-
pants of the gallery, leaning over the
balustrade in their eagerness to examine
the favored individual for whom the
chair of state had been so ostentatious-
ly prepared, and vision of myself
marching up the hall, the mark of every
eye, almost made me reel in my chair.
shuddered. strove to speak, conceiy-
ed wild thought of diving under the
table, when, whish with lurid, fitful
swirl, out went the enormous lus.re,
with all the minor lights following suit.
We were in total darkness.
+ will not describe the confusion that
succeeded, the screams of laughter from
the gallery, the scramble and the crash