Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1872-06-14
THE AMATEUR BEGGAR.
Lost anvthiur Ross 2n

"Lost anything, Boss ?"
[ started, as though a dozen of Prof.
Tyndall's electric batteries had been
discharged through me simultaneously,
and confronted a specimen, Of the pur-
est water, of the Celtic race. He was
gracefully indulging in the unenviable
luxury of a short clay pipe, as he leaned
his elbow on the gateway of the family
pig-stye. No, had lost nothing, and
vet I felt very much like detected
thief as | nervously replied in the mega
tive to the inquiry of the squatter lord
of the rocky domain on whose premises
was trespassing.
~ thought you was lookin' for
suthin," rejoined the Irish self-appoint-
ed lord of the manor.
Looking for something / had been
prowling in search Of something for
nearly two hours among the shanties,
the children, the goats, the COWS and
the dirty ducks and geese which seem
to love to congregate around the bound
aries of the Central Park. | had been
stared at by idle men (for it was Sun
day, and clean shirt-sleeves were the or
der of the day.; had been thoroughly
dpDIdlSto NY o1dOGCIhlJ WOllCI3 AtctN
been followed by goats, and unwashed,
unkempt, stockingless children, and
growled at by ours, but this naturalized
citizen was tho only being who had SO
far verbally expressed any curiosity to
learn what brought me there. He, Ger
tainly, at first mistook me for poultry
slealer, or detective police officer, for
in the words of the old rhyme:
He eyed me up, he eyed me down.
AS though owned one-half the town."
Endeayoring to assume an air Of SUI
preme indifference, | pursued my
search, and shortly afterward, much
to my joy, lighted on the very thing |
was seeking for-an old worn out and
discarded boot | clutched it with all
the eagerness of q diamond digger; and
stuffing it into the pocket of my over
coat, retraced my steps, muttering to
myself, "It don't match very well but
perhaps, SO much the BETTER My Irish
friend had evidently been watching my
every movement, either from feeling
of suspicion or of Unsuitable curiosity
And, as passed his wooden castle, he
turned his head slowly, and, after Law
ish expectoration, remarked to his next
door neighbor, I" Bedad, that mans as
mad as the divil." Had he really been
aware of my intentions, it is probable
that he would have rendered his adjec-
tives in the superlatiye degree, and
much more forcibly. = =
I The fact lis, like Don Quixote, the
spirit of adventure was strong upon me.
But, unlike Don Quixote, | had no
faithful Saneho Panza to perform my
bidding in the way Of. making prepara
tons. Nor have l any Cervantes to
chronicle my deeds. But they were far
from heroic. I was simply going beg
ging, and ] wanted another worn out
boot to complete my outfit in true pro-
fessional style. had one that had
purloined from an ash-barrel ON Third
avenue. i had also a hat that I had
picked up. from a gutter in my neigh
borhood; and 1 had purchased an old
pair of pantaloons and frock-coat,
which had once been black, but had
| faded into green-browns shade of color,
| from an old clothes store in Avenue B.
In this regal apparel proposed to en-
ter into competition with the aristocra-
| cy of beggardom for the charitabless
pathies Of the welld1essed and gold
| scattering promenaders on Broadway.
Belisarius, with his "da iobolatns," was to
be foolsto mel Louis Philippe, begging
for centimes at the corner of the Rue de
la Paix, as his enemies were so fond of
picturing him, should be an innocent
compared with the imposture on the
purse-strings Of the public which I pro-
posed to perpetrate, 9 Dim visions of
founding an asylum for aged beggars
out of the profits of my days work
floated airily through my brain; and,
lost in the pleasurable contemplation OF
my adventure, regarding with the eye
OF an artist my aWorn-out boots and tat
tered apparel as they lay, ready to be
4 donned, upon a chair before me, L be.
lieve that forthe moment, begging, as
means OF gaming a. livelihood, almost
rose to the dignity of a profession in
my eyes.
Putting my begging costume into s
satchel, sought the rooms of theatri
cal friend who had promised to aid me
as a valet de cham5re for the occasion. He
was also to use his green.room knowl