Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1872-11-07
Chinese Theater In san Francisco.
WHAT NAV be the sounds Of the Chinese

atrical screen, with the constant under
tone and ovartOne OF the gongs and
drums, it is incredibly Ike caterwauling.
Threw in few "ch's' and "tt'sh into the
common caterwaul Of the midnight cat,
and you have the highest art Of the Chi
nese stage, so far as il can be judged of
simply by sound. We have amused our
selves by practicing it, by writing ii: and
each experiment has but confirmed our
impression Of the wonderful similarity
AT first, in spite OF the deafening loud.
ness Of the din, it is ludicrous beyond
conception. To see these superbly dressed
Chinese creatures every one of them as
perfectly and exduisitely dressed as the
finest figures on their satin fans or rice.
paper pictures, and looking exactly like
them--to see these creatures strutting and
sailing and sweeping and bowling and
bending, beating their breasts and tearing
their boards, gesticulating and rushing
about in an utterly inComprehensiblc
play, with caterwauling screams issuing
from their mouths, is for a few minutes
so funny that you laugh till the tears rum
and think you will 20 TO the Chinese the
ater every night as long as. you stay in
San Francisco. said 50 to the friend who
had politely gone with me. lie had been
to the performance before. He smiled
DityIngly, and yawned behind his hand.
At the end of half an hour, ! whispered
Twice a week viii do" In fifteen min.
utes more, said: 81 think we viii 90
out now | can't endure this racket an
other minute. But, nevertheless, ! shall
come once more, with an interpreter.
must and will know what all this num-
merry means
The friend smiled again tremendously.
But we did 60 again with an Interpreter;
and the funniest thing of all was to find
out how very little all the caterwauling
and rushing and bending and bowling and
sweeping and strutting really meant.
Difficulty Of getting an Interpreter, too,
was another interesting feature in the oc-
casion, A lady, who had formerly been
a missionary in China, had promised to
go with u.s. and, as even she was not sure
of being able to understand Chinese cater
wauled she proposed to take one of the
boys from the missionary school, to in.
terpret to her before she interpreted to
us. SO we drove to the school, Mrs ------
went in The time seemed very long that
we waited At last she came back, look.
ing amused and vexed, to report that not
one of those intelligent Christian Chinese
would leave his studies that evening to go
10 the theater.
81 suppose it is an old story to them,
said |.
Not at all said she. CON the con.
trary, hardly a boy there has been inside
the theater. But they cannot bear to lose
a minute from their lessons Mr.. Loomis
really urged some Of them; but it was Of
no use" ...... .a
Int grocery shop on Kearny street,
however we found clever youn man,
less absorbed in learning; and he went
with us as Interpreter. Again the same
hideous din; the same clouds of smoke;
the same hubbub of caterwauling.
Luckily for us, our first lesson in the
Chinese drama was to be a simple one.
And here | pause, considering whether
my account of this play will be believed.
This is the travellers great perplexity.
The incredible things are always the only
things worth telling. But is it best TO tell
-hems
The actors in this play were three--a
lady of rank, her son, and her man cook.
The play opened with soliloquy by the
ady. She is sitting alone, sewing Her
husband has gone to America; he did not
bid her farewell. Her only son is at
school, She is sad and lonely, She
weeps
Enter boy He asks if dinner is
ready,
Enter cook Cook says it is not time.
Boy says he wants dinner. Cook says he
shall not have it, This takes fifteen min.
ltes
Mother examines boy on his lessons.
Boy does not know them; tries to peep.
Mother reproves; makes boy kneel; pre-
oares to whip; whips Mother weeps.
Boy catches dies on the floor; bites her
finger.
Enter cook to see what the noise means.
Cook takes boy to task. Boy stops his
ears Cook bawls, Cook kneels to lady;
reproves her also; tells her she must
keep her own temper if She would train
her boy.
Lady sulks, naturally. Boy slips be
hind and cuts her work out Of her en-.
frame Cookattacks boy. Cook
sings a lament, and goes out to attend to
dinner; but returns in frantic distress
During his absence everything has boiled
over; everything has been burned toa crisp.
Dinner is ruined. Cook now recopciles
mother and son; draEs son to his knees;
makes him repeat words ot supplication.
While he does this, cook turns his back
TO the audience, takes of his beard care
fully, lays it on the floor while he drinks
a cupful Of tea, Exit all, happy ana
smiling.
This is all, literally all! It took an hour
and a half The audience listened with
interest. The gesticuatons, the
expressions Of face, the tones OF the
actors all conveyed the idea of the deep.
est tragedy. Except for our interpreter,
| should have taken the cook for sooth-
sayer, a priest, a h!ghwaymau and muir
derer alternately. | should have suppos.
cd that all the dangers, hopes, fears, de-
lights possible in the lives OF three human
beings were going on on that stage. Now
We saw how very tar.tctched and prcpos.
ferrous lad probably been our theories of
the play we had seen before, we having
constructed Il most brilliant plot from oUr
Of the pantomme
After this domestic drama comes u
fierce spectacular play TOO absurd TO be
described IN which nations went to war
because Kings donkey had been killed.
And the Kings and their armies marched
in at one door and out of the other, sat on
gilt thrones, fought with silt swords,
tumblcd each other head over heels with
as much vigor and jus. about as much
art as small boys play the battle OF Bun
ker Hin with the aurScry chairs un a
rainy day. But the dresses Of these war.
like monarchs were gorgeous and fantas.
tic beyond description Long, gay-color-
ed robes, blazoned and blazing with gold
and silver embroidery, small t}ags. two