Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1872-01-20

ONE-LEGGED MEN.-An ex-army officer,
who lost leg during the recent civil war, has
been so impressed with the peculiarities Of his
situation and the novel adventures and Incl
dents growing out of that situation, that he has
written book on the subject entitled John
Smiths Funny Adventures on Crutch." 1t
is published by John Z. Potter & Co., Phila-
delphia, and its eccentricity has given it a wide
circulation. The author complains good-natur-
cdly that he is looked upon as public property,
and almost bored to death by the many inqui-
>itive strangers he meets in his travels.
Il can never, says he, "obtain moments
rest in any public place. | no sooner take
seat in car, restaurant, or lecture room than
some one near me, whom have never seen be-
tore, Introduces himself with the stereotyed
remark, 1 see you've met with mistortune,'
and on my asserting, proceeds to ask the fol-
lowing questions:
Did you lose your limb in battle? What
battle? Did q cannon-ball take it off? A
rife bali, ch? Did it knock it clear of
Did it sever an artery? Did it hit the bone
Did it break it? Did you afterwards
find the ball? Was it crushed out of
~hape? Did you fall when hit? Did you walk
off the field ? Who carried you off? Did you
feel much pain? How long after you were
wounded till it was amputated Who perform.
ed the operation? Did you take chloroform
Did it put you to sleep? Aud didn't you feel
the operation Not even the saving Of the bone?
Could not your limb have been saved? Was it
taken off right where the wound was? Can you
wear an artificial leg? Would the government
furnish it if you could ? Do you draw pension?
How much How old are you? What is your
name? What did you do before the war? Don't t
you often wish you had mt lost your leg? How
does person feel with leg off? Does it ache
when the weather changes? Would you rather
lose leg than an arm? have heard persons
say that an amputated limb still feels as if it
were on; is that so? How do you account for
that?
An these questions, dear public, l have
answered thousands Of times, and may have to
answer thousands Of times yet if my miserable
existence is heightened out for many years.
Imagine how it must torment me. The same
old Questions, to me long since devoid of inter-
est [ must meekly answer over and over again,
lay by day, week by week, year by year ! How
would YOU like to commence and repeat the a
B C's five thousand times a day as long as you
live ? Be pleasant, wouldn't it?'
How TO GET On IN THE WoRLD.-A work
ing man some time ago published his own bio
graphy one Of the most interesting little vol
unes that has appeared during the present
appear like vanity in me to write that | now
DO, but should not give my life truly it |
omitted it. When filling cart with earth on
Il farm, never stopped work because my side
of the cart might be heaped up before the
other side, at which was another workman |
pushed over what [ had heaped up to help
him; so doubtless he did to me, when he was
first and was last When | have filled my
column or columns of newspaper with matter
Tor which [ was to be paid, [ never stopped if
| thought the subject required more explana
lion, because there was no contract Tor more
payment, or no possibility of obtaining more.
When have lived in barrack room, have
stopped work, and taken baby from sol
it for her, or gone for water for her, or cleaned
another man S accoutrements, though it was 90
part of my duty to do so.
''Whcn [ had been engaged in political liter
ature and travelling for a newspaper, have
gone many miles out OF my road to ascertain a
local fact, or to pursue subject to its mlnutest
details if it appeared that the public were un-
acquainted with the facts of the case and this.
when had work, was the most pleasant and
profitable. When [ have wanted work, l have
accepted it at any wages | could get, at plow
in farm draining, stone-quarrying breaking
stones at wood cutting, in a saw-pit, as civil
ian, or soldier. In London l have groomed
cabman's horse and cleaned out stable for
sixpence | have since tried literature, and
have done as much writing for ten shilliugs as
have readily obtained-both sought for and
offered-ten guineas for.
''But if had not been contented to begin at
the beginning, and accept ten shillings, |
should not have arisen to guineas. | have lost
nothing by working, whatever | have been do
ing, with spade or pen-I have been my own
helper. Are you prepared to initiate? HUI
mility is always the attendant Of sense, folly
alone was proud. A wise divine, when preach
ing to the youths of his congregation, was wont
to say: beware of being golden apprentices,
silver journeymen and copper masters The
only cure for pride is sense; and the only path
to promotion is condescension. What multi
tudes have been ruined by the pride of their
heartsl' Here is testimony worth treasurlng