The new North-west. [volume] (Deer Lodge, Mont.) 1869-1897, 1872-11-23
An lRREpRfssIDlf eoY.

Al JkREPkEe3lolE o0Y.
ssaset.sls o. HI sisssr - oash1al
Han.
John Smith-you've heard of him-is very
bashful; is too bashful in truth. He was
born and raised in the country. His father
gave him good education. and allows him
plenty of money. But John. with all other
attainments, could not accustosu himself to
female society. not because he did not like
the girls. but because his nature would not
permit him TO associate with the opposite
sex.
1t once happened. not very long ago, that
Johns father had some very important bust.
ness to transact in the city. He had also
some very particular business to attend to at
home, which demanded his personal atten
tcntiOn, and not possessing the power of
ubiquity, he delegated his son John to trans.
act that in the city.
John being thus commissioned, immcdi.
atcly proceeded to the city, and to the resi-.
dcncc of his fathers old friend, whom he
found to Ike very nice old gentleman, who
had beautiful daughter and gold specta.
cles John was ushercd into the parlor, q
new thing for him), and motioned to = seat
no, sofa (anothcr new thing).
But we must use his Own language: took
my scat and made observations. Everything
was fine, fine carpets, line sofas, fine tables,
fine curtains, fine hooks, fine pianos fine
everything, and especially fine young lady
who was dressed in fine silk, fine satin
and who had fine curls. and fine appear.
ance generally. After chatting with the
old gentleman few minutes, lie took his
hat down, told me to make myself ut home
for an hour or two. and left-left me alone
with his daughter and u young misciicvous
boy. the lady's brother. didn't relish the
situation ut all. The idea of keeping city
belle engaged in conversation for two hours
-perdltion; silence rcigncd in the parlor
short time you may bet. amused myself
as much Us possible with the bOy-tlnt is, I
loaned him my knife aud watcl, key, and
watched him cut holes in the carpet with
the one, and spoil tho other. l don't know
wlla, would have done had it not been for
that boy--hc was SO good to attract ones nj.
tcntioD. you know.
Ii is true he asked some startling ques-
tons 0cca 'ionally. such as this: Are You
going To court sister Emily" but such
things must be expected under such c,rcunl.
stances.
Miss Emily, thinking, no doubt. to be
hostess. she must keep her guest engaged in
conversation, asked me how l liked couu.
try life, &c. She said that it must be a
beautiful sight to see the laborers. male and
female. rompins on the new mown hay On
New Years day; that she always did think
she would like to spend Christmas in the
country, nut gathering with the village
lads and lasses; that II hal always been a |
mystery 10 her how they got eggs off the
trees without breaking them.
In return. l thought, to keep up nv part
of the conversation. it was necessary for me-
to quote poetry and the like, which l did.
Among other quotations I unfortunately !
quoted the well known lines Of Shakespeare:
There is a Divinity that shapes our ends.
Rough hew them Ar you will
AT this juncturc the boy, who had pcrcl,ed
himself upon my knee, looked very earnest
and said: divinity shaped the end of your
nose mighty curious"
I'm certain l wished somebody would
spank the young rascal. We talked Of hills
mountains. wales, cataracts-I believe l said
waterfalls, when the boy spoke up and tri.
umphantly said:
why, sisters got u trunk full of them
up stairs; pap says they're made out of boss
hair"
This revelation struck into me, and bushes
into the cheeks Of my fair companion.
1t began to be very apparent to me that I
must he very guarded in what I said. lest
said boy might slip in his remarks in un-
called for places; in fact, l turned my con.
versa.ion to him. told him he ought to
60 home with MT, see what nice chickens VIC
had in the country. Unluckiiy mentioned
. yoke of calves my brother owned.
The word calves ruined all. The little
fellow looked up and said: Sisters got =
dozen of them, but she don't wear EN- only
when she goes up town of windy days"
Leave the room, unmannerly little
wretch !" exclaimed Emily, ''leave immcdi.
ately."
II know what you want me to leave the
room for" replied he, ''you can't fool me
you want to sit in that mans lap and kiss
him like you did Bill Simmons the other
day-you can't fool me, I'll jist tell you;
give me some candy like he did, and I'll 70.
You think because you've got the grecian
That you're smart Guess know thing or
Two. I'm mad 1t you anyhow, cause pap
would have bought me top yesterday if it
hadn't been for your getting them curls, dog
gone you; you needn't turn 80 red in the
lace, cause can see the paint. There sin't
no use winking Mt me with that glass eye Of
vour'n, cause amt going oui'n here, now
hats what's the matter with the purps. l
'on't care If you are twenty. eight years old.
Vou amt no boss of mine, you old fool"
That Is all the story that John related.
He says he don't know how he got out of
he scrape. O. ~
n American Diss I. H. csssssA lgs~ss
vsGavtaA 49,
From tho nsvisea Of Naples. ri