Democratic enquirer. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1867-1873, 1872-01-31
From the San Francisco Chronicle
TELEGRAPMIC TICK s.
AN Amusing Episode at n Hotel
Breakfast Table.

leading third-class hotels, and,
being a somewhat hilarious
disposition, find great amuse.
ment in carrying on coversa-
tfqn with each other at the
table by ticking on the plates
with knife, fork or spoon. Fol
the information of those moi
acquainted with telsgraphy il
may be. well tostate that a com
bination Of sounds Or ticks con.
stitute the telegrapic alphabet
and persons familiar with these
sounds can converse thereby
as intelligently as with spoken
words:
The young Neutrality-suspicious.
as already stated, were in the
habit of indulging in table
talk by this means whenever
they desired to say anything
private to each other. For in
stance, No. l would pick up
his knife and tick off some re-
mark as this to No. 2: "Why
is this butter like the ofense of
Hamlet's uncle ?" No. 2: 81
give it up No l: Because
it's rank and smells to Heaven -
Of course, the joke is not ap.
preciated by the landlord, who
sits close by, because he
doesn't understand telegraphic
ticks, and probably he wouldn't
appreciate it much if he did;
but the jokers enjoy it i'm
mensely and laugh immoder.
ately, while the other guests
wonder what can be the occa-
sion for so much merriment,
and naturally conclude the op.
orators must he idiots.
A few nights ago, while
these fun.loving youths were
seated at breakfast, a stout,
built young man entered the
dining room with a handsome
girl on his arm, whose blush
ing countenance showed her to
be a bride. The couple had
in fact, been married but a day
or two previous, and had come
to San Francisco from their
home in Oakland, or Mud
Springs, Oh some other rural
village, for the purpose of
spending the honeymoon. The
telegraphic tickers commenced
as soon as the husband and
wife seated themselves.
No. l opened the discourse
as follows: "What a lovely
little pigeon this is along side
of me-aint she?"
Mo-. "Perfectly charming
looks as though butter would
not melt in her mouth. Just
married, I guess; don't you
think SOP"
No. 1. eyes, l should
Judge she was. What luscious
lips she has got. If that
country pumpkin beside her
was out of the road, I'd give
her a hug and a kiss just for
luck.'
No. 2. Suppose you try it
Give her a little
nudge under the table with
your knee"
There is no telling to what
extent the impudent rascals
might have gone but for an
amazing and entirely unforeseen
event. The bridegroom's face
had flushed and q dark scowl |
was on his brow during the
of the ticking conver.
sation; but the operators were
too much occupied to pay any
attention to him. The reader
may form some idea of the
young mems CONSERVATION
when the partner of the lady
picked up his knife and ticked
of' the following terse but Wig
orous message:
"This lady is my wife, and
As soon as she gets through her
breakfast I propose to wiring
both your necks, you insolent
The countenancss Of the oper.
.tors fell very suddenly when
his message comenced. BY
The time it ended they had
ost all appetite and apprecia.
ion of Jokes and slipped out
If the dining-room In a very
amid and uncereno on;o,,a roon