The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1872-05-16

Not Miss A pretty widow.
How to prevent bad dreams-D Don't
go 10 sleep.
What Is near to every Americans
heart-IIis stomach.
What did Lot do when his wife turned
to salt--Got a fresh one.
Jenks says that pawnbrokers Office
must be loan some place.
"A subscriber wishes to learn If poets
have TO pay for poetical license.
-lfa man doesn't take care Of of No. /
be viii soon have to take care Of.
Josh Billings says very truly, You'd
better not know 80 much, than TO know
20 many things that ain'ts
MIR. Cobb has married Miss Webb.
lie knew they were meant to be joined
as soon as be spied her.
"A lady, widowed by the Chicago con-
Migration, has been recently remarked.
Her second husband calls her his relic of
the great fire.
MADAM, great many persons were
disturbed at the concert last night by the
crying of your baby. Well, do wonder
such people win 60 to concerts
Theodore Tilton, ofthe Golden Age,
exclaims; Save me from God who
damnsl We should like to do it, my boy
but the thing Is impossible.
"A Kentucky legislator sent up the
following memorandum to the clerk.
Leeye is asked TO bring in A. Bill to al
tar tho time for the Legister to meet.
Referred to the comfy on Roligen.
"A little girl four years old had learn
cd the verse, Ask, and 1t shall be given
you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and
II shall be opened unto you. When a
few days afterward she was asked to re-
cite her verse she said quite glibly: Seek
and ye shall find ask and Won shall be
knocked.
During the war lady, often passing
from cot TO cot through the ward hospital
was shoeken TO hear soldier laughing
At her, and turned TO reprove him. Why,
look here, madam, said the soldier, You
have given me tract on the sin of dane
ing when I've both legs shot of.
"A lover, who was sighted by the fe-
males, very modestly asked young lady
IL she wonId let him spend the evening
with her, No, she angrily replied, that's
what wont Why, replied he, You
needn't be so fussy; | didn't mean this
evening, but some stormy one when
can't 90 any where else.
-Abernethy, the celebrated surgeon,
finding large pile Of paving stones OBJ
po~iis TO his door, on his returning home
one afternoon in his carriage, swore hast
lily al the pAyor, and desired him 10 re-
move them. Where shall take them TO ?
asked the Hibernian. To belt cried the
cholcic surgeon. Paddy leant upon his
hammer, and then looking up In his face.
said with an arch smile, Hadn't better
take them to heayenl-sure they'd be more
out ofyour honors way.
"A guest at hotel In Belfast, Me. /
on being told that dinner was ready. /
stripped OF his coat, and, accompanied
BY bis wife, entered the dining.room 10
bic shirt sleeves. 4 walter brought him
= bill Of fare, which be regarded curious.
~ and then laid down Pretty soon an.
other bill Of fare was placed on bis plate.
Then be arose 10 bis wrath, and exclaim- /
ING didn't come here TO read show .
blilsl ! came after some dinner! called
70 bis wife, and the twain departed.
A clerical gentleman, III examining
: Sandsy school, asked the class before
him i any Of them could tell him any.
ihihg about he Apostle Peter. A little
Etri raised her hand, mach to The grAuh.
cation Of ibe examiner Come up hcp,
ny good little girl, said be: / am clad
soa frnemscr your little Bible lessons 50
3eil, Now tell the boy and glrls what
1oa know Of It. Peter. The little girl
Nas quite willing, and commenced
Peter Peter, punkln-eAier, bad a wife
md couldn't keep her; be pat her IN
-. Bat before she conld ge; punkln.
ieli, The school WAS IN rear.