The Sweetwater enterprise. (Sweetwater, Tenn.) 1869-187?, 1872-04-11
HIRAM GREEN on REFORM.
How the Old Thing Works in
SkeenSbOrO.

onto Skeensboro. It's wusser than the
smallpox opedenick.
A thundcrin site.
You can yaccinatc for the small pox,
and keep her of,
The only way YOU eau cure Refor
NOR is, by shown lot Of fut ollises onto
him, with good payin' porkisotes. That's
80.
| How the Epedemick got into Skeens-
Luro was Il conmdrum ekal to the one
which has been puzzln' John Mcbride
Dawson, viz "Who in thunder is a-goin
to pay for nll them patent saies prcsen-
ted to his friends?' When the Reform
coutagion bust out in New York, the
Skocnsboro trustees and law ofliscrs cal
led mcctin' and established Quaran-
tine Just outside the village limits. No
| Emigrant, from other parts, was allowed
to enter the BOrO, unless Examined by
sl,ill-Fisicians, kindly sent up by Rob-
many Hall, New York. Things was
rite lovely at that ere Quarantine for u
while, you bot. One rash individual
vino was found with q copy of the New
York Times in his cote-tale pocket, was
kept in Quarantine for 3 weeks, when
the Fisicians sent him back to New
York u kitin, as he was found to be n
Resident of Jimmy OBrien's ward, and
salt coodent save the poor diSca%ed cuss
But tho fatal malody at last got into our
quiet midst, by an individual letchin' in
his close, He was disgised in a Tweed
SCOT so the Quarantine doctors didn't
suspect him ontil ho had shattered it
broadcast over Skeonsboro's peaceful
domains.
Thus it usually is, viz: when yo en-
tertain stranger onawaros, how in the
deuce is feller goin' to tell he haint
nussin' viper, who'll rise his hydrant
head, and kick the stuflin' out Of him ?
1t would have been zoos bill in
Skecnsboro's pocket, if that Reformer
had staid down to Moo York and tend
cd to his own Dizziness.
The way reform took holt was cau-
ton. Meetin's was called, People
who'd been arter offs ever sins Horris
Greely had buckled on his armor and
waded in, was there
Blue spirits and red, white spirits and gray,
Went in for reform, because the thing would pay.
Which is poickry with tcllin' morril.
At mcetin', it was resoluted "to
have Il committy of 25 appintod us Re-
formers, but rs there was 81 in the room,
it was decided to make committy of
the hole, so as all coOd hold oHS.
But when it came to Electin' ofIisors
for the committy, it was found that by
ballit each OF the 81 had just one vote
for cheerman.
This, You know, is one Of the alarmin'
simtoms of the disease.
Arter "a long pull and strong pull, y
it was decided that the hull lot should
be officers; when!everything moved of
as lovely rs witewashin' committy's
report.
The Editor of the Skeensboro Wind,
MH, weakly jonrnal, who'd never had
any public printin' an sich, was there
He promised to come out, with rs Extra
copies, in his next isshoo, givin' the
present village ofisers, "Hail! Kerlum,
bia, with no pitch hot"
One of the leedin' spirits in the Re
!: form project was Joe Bigler. He helt
an offs once.
Ho was elected to fill position, BY
the State, for 3 years, as overseer Of {
small room, and soler OF butes at a cole
, brated castle on the Hudson.
He didn't banker arter that offs, bu
II of his feller-sitizens insisted so hard
that Joe excepted the offs with tears il
his eyes and stripes on his close.
Deckin Bradley was another Refor
mer.
The Deekin had been candidate 70
offs ever sints it was one of the occom
plishments of an offis-holder to steel.
, The Deekin was chuuhed once, be
cause his nabors OnfeeiinIy refused t
furnish the good man with wood 70
n nuthin' from their wood-piler.
y He wanted to be Justice of the Peace
e and disgrace an oflis which the sui
7 skribor had filled for 4 consecutive yeer
e raisin it to q hire standard than usua
y y as well as raisin' an interestin' family {
n eleven (11) helthy orfprings.
Justise, in them days, never got IL
+ and peeked out of one corner of he
0 bandaner handkerchief to sec if n Thi,
0 was clothed in fine raimint and stor,
close, Or was poorer than Jobs ol
gobbler.
= No, Stree.
.R She didn't care continental wheth,
she was dealin' with beggar ON hos
back, or q rich man pickin' up cruml
&c under Izzy Lazarus's table.
If the old gal keeps on in her preset
course, she will soon become woman
re- rites woman, and train in sich compal
=, G. Francis Train, Woodruff and ClaAi
id and Soozan Is. Anthony.
Desist, woman! ere you're a gol
A