Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1872-08-14

his boys absence from school,
The Vossische Zeitung, the gre adj
vertising medium in Berlin, is offered
for sale. A stock company offered
three million thalers for it, but the pro-
prletors asked one million more.
ARoHITECr-How would you support
projecting portico or piazza Student
With brackets or else with what do
ye-columns. Architect--What is q rear
elevation? Student-Getting your
back up, [ suppose.
EVERY one has heard the reply of the
butcher to the sentimental body who
demonstrated against the killing of in
nocent lambs: ''Lor, ma'am, you
wouldn't eat them alive, would you 2"
AprOpos of this, there is an anecdote
of Goldsmith not commonly known
When he had written that beautiful
stanza of the Hermit"
''No hocks that range the valley free
To slaughter l condemn;
Taught by the Power that pities me,
learn to pity them -
he submitted 1t to (the future) Mrs.
Goldsmith, who is said to have sug-
gested the following Improvement
"No iocks that range the valley free
10 slaughter condemn
The butchers kiEt the sheep for me-
I buy The meat of til q7a."
IDA WILSON, nee Lewis, the g Grace
Darling of America" still makes New
port her home, and can often be seen
IN the harbor managing her beautiful
boat. Notwithstanding the fact that
she has taken unto herself "a better
half" she still likes to be called "Ida
Lewis, - as of yore.
@eTALK about you shuttin' feller's
self up with burnin' charcoal and dyin'
easy" said dlsgusted Hoosier, ''why,
l shut myself in the OK yard, and burnt
more'n a bushel of the stuff, and near
ly froze, and didn't die 4 bit" Did
you put the bars up?" asked COM
panion. ''No,' replied the Hoosier,
looking blank, "and that's what beat
me.n
Mr.. JESSE r. GRANT, father of the
President, last week paid visit to
Georgetown, Brown county, Ohio, of
which place he was for many years
resident, and from which the President
went to West Point. The old gentle
man is exceedingly feeble, decrepit not
attack of paralysis.
AT the grave of wealthy and dis
tingu1shed citizen of Vienna recently,
two ladies, each claiming to be the
widow of the deceased, met by acci-
dent, each having come to decorate the
tomb with flowers, and other emblems
of affectionate remembrance The re-
suit was that the police were obliged
to interfere to keep the peace.
PRIVATE letters from Mr. Jefferson,
the actor, state that his recovery has
not been as rapid as newspapers are
good enough to make it. His sight is
still feeble, and he suffers from severe
pain in the eyes. He will be compelled
to wear glasses until he begins his en-
gagements next season. His eyes are
however, steadily improving, and the
danger of his losing his sight is passed.
TIE upward tendency in the English
iron market continues. Bar iron, which
was quoted at e8 les per ton. in Sep
| tember last, had advanced to 914 lbs q
month ago, and, at last advices by mail
was selling at from Els to tl5 II shll-
lings and pence, and even at these
rates manufacturers refused to take or
ders for future delivery, except subject
to current rates.
A LITTLE girl in a New York orphan
asvlum uuarreled with another girl and
scratched her face. For this she was
punished and required to learn and
repeat verse from the Bible, being
allowed TO make her own selection.
/ She chose the first verse of the Psalms,
IA. which is as follows: BLESSED be
the Lord my strength, which teacheth
my hands to war, and my fingers to
fight. y
A ooLoRED preacher in Sparta, Ga,
some time ago, was heard to say in q
funeral sermon of deceased brother:
ssHe ruminates no longer among us :;
he have exonerated from the syllogisms
of this worlds Instrumentation, and
when he gets to de cold dry streem Of
| de River Jordin the Berosines and
Perlphenes will meet him dare to row
him over on dry land to the sylyer-ster-
ing city"
THE idea of reclaiming the Colorado
! desert by means Of arteslan wells has
! been broached 1t is thought that q
! large subterranean stream runs under
the desert, and that all that is neces-
sary is to bore deep enough TO STRIKE
| it. Congress will be applied to fo1 a
grant as a recompense for boring these
wells.
The monks of La Trappe have q
clock in their large hall of the convent,
which is a frightfully complete piece
of bandiwork and mechanism. A
perfact human skeleton STANDS by the
wall pointing with its feshless fingers
at the hours marked upon dial, which
revolyes. The picture is hldeous one.
hnt the monks see a moral in it's exist
ence and lesson in its death-like GER
tainty.
AMONG the curious things connected
with the Goldfish is the frequency with
which large stones are found in their
stomachs. These are of various sizes,
sometlmes, in large fish, weighing
many pounds, and it is popular be-
lief among fishermen that these are
taken in just before storm for the
purpose of anchoring themselves dur
ing the expected swell of the sea- This
is corcoborated by the fact Gf it be
one) that all the fish taken before a
storm agree III this peculiarity, where
as at ordinary times nothing of the
kind can be detected.