Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1872-02-10

a steerage passage to Americs. II was
the limited extent Of my means which
made me resolve to 20 back to my quar-
ters at Aldershott, and appear on par
ade the next day. .tfm.s..as
The clock in the cofee-room where l
was sitting showed halfpast eleven
as the hour of the night; the waiter only
was in the, room arranging, his spoons
and napkins in the buffet, yawning sur.
reptitiously every now and then, quite
Indifferent to the problems which were
agitating me-Waterloo bridge or Alder
shott2 l must make up my mind quickly;
another Eve minutes and it would be too
late for the one; the other was open.
Waiter, q hanson shouted all Of
sudden, in tone which made the man
jump iiItlVt3 VI B8B SJ8vl3 y
At that time there was train which
left-not Waterloo, but some station a
little distance down the line; it might
have been Yauxhalb or possibly Nine
Elms, / scarcely remember which-the
station at midnight. 1t was popularly
known among us as the cold-meat train.
Its passengers we're dead bodies for the
Woking cemetery The railway com
pany, ever solicitous to accommodate
the public and turn an honest penny,
had, for. the convenience of the camp,
affixed to this train one frst-class car
riage. After leaving the dead bodies at
Woking, the carriage was run on to
Marlborough, whence you could walk to
the camp, if you had not been prudent
enough to order fly to meet you.
| The hotel servant who ushered me to
the cab got a handsome gratuity for his
pains. 1t was my leave-taking of the
world of pleasure, and i was too insol-
vent to be careful about little matters.
The cab sped me quickly to. the station;
but the clock at the hotel had been slow;
as we passed under the railway arch a
permonitory shrek from the engine over
head warned me that the train was on
the point of starting. / stopped the cab
at the bridge, and ran quickly up mar
row fight of steps which led directly on
to the end Of the platform-known only
to the initiated; the train was moving on,
but | had just time, despite warning
shouts of guard and porters, to open the
door Of the last carriage and jump in.
The other Compartments Of the carriage
/ noticed were lighted but this one was
dark; that didn't affect me. l didn't
want to read. | took out box of wax
matches and proceeded to light . cigar,
AS the glow Of the match lit up the IN
terror of the carriage, saw in the Cor
ner long, dark object, quite black, and
yet with some little metallic CLEAN about
it. Itwas coffin, reared up at the fur
ther side of the carriage, a board being
placed up behind it, against which it
leaned. = FAsI looked steadfastly at the
coffin, it appeared suddenly to glow with
faint radiance. Every nail and every
plate upon it began to CLEAN with a
strange, mysterious light. BAIL it was
the moon. We had just left the clouds
of London behind us, and the great,
round moon, rising out Of river mists,
cast her glorious beams right athwart us,
but turned away from her in disgust.
What was the beauty of the night to me
"a ruined spendthrift-the scorn and
laughing stock of the world The
black coffin on the other side was a more
congenial companion TO me. i lit an
other match, and read the inscription ON
the plate: William Heathcote, died
25th May, 49,, aged % years, = 3 = N I 81
The hair on my head rose in mass;
my heart ceased to beat. My own name,
my own age, and theivery date of the day
i was bornI
1t chimed in, too, did this inscription,
so mysteriously with that impulse | had
felt the whole day--a turning to self-de-
struction, as a means Of f'escape from all
the degradations of life, ! wouldAecept
the omen. Il carried with me---a prae-
tce had acquired in the ,east7-a small
American revolver, which fitted into my
waistcoat pocket. Itwould kill at twenty
PAGES, and would give me my mittimus
easily enough, l drew it out, and placed
it against my forehead; then it struck
me that the ball after passing through
my head, might pass also through the
partition dividing the compartment, and
strike some one in the next carriage. /
turned therefore, my back to the window,
and again placed the muzzle of the pis
tol to my forehead. Again ] withdrew
it. There was no hurry. The train did
not stop till it reached Woking. | could
not possibly be disturbed. l wanted a
signal; the whistle Of the engine as the
driver sighted the red lamps Of Woking,
should be the signal of my departure
from the world.
YES" said aloud, turning upon
myself as it were, in sort of frenzy;
"yesl the moment the whistle sounds.
William Heathcote, you shall die.
l have said that the rising moon was
shining brightly into the carriage, full
upon the coffin and upon its mysterious
inscription. | don't think | really be-
lieved that this coffin had any tangible
existence. 1t might be but the product
of my own fevered brain, but none
the less on that account was ita veritable
warning of my doom. Looking UP, 1
however, to see if it had indeed disap-
peared, l saw no longer the coffiH-lid,
but white shrouded figure, a pallid,
corpse-like face, the eyes of which, in
the moonbeams, shone upon me with
sepulchral CLEAN.
For the moment thought that / had
indeed passed into the land Of shadows;
that was q disembodied spirit, looking
upon my own mortal remains; and the
thought that had ceased to be an indi-
viduality, and had become the mere
shadow of thought, struck such a chill
terror and horror to my soul, that every
other impulse Of it was lost in an eager
effort 20 resume my individual existence.
I came to myself with a deep gasp,
digging finger nails into my palms.
An, the Joy Of that moment, after the
torture of the struggle back to hfel
Life, ragged, miserable Il might be- but
still dear life how precious i seemed; 4
how unfathomably deep, below the ut
most wretehedness Of being, was the
dread abyss of non-existencel Shadows
/ de6ed them. .....-,r
eCome forth, old molelNI l shouted to
my double in the coffin. He came forth.
As live, he stepped out Of the coffin,
seated himself opposite to me, and laid |
q finger on my arm-laid finger on my /
r L