The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1872-04-11
wodcra Biography the
ssrcer-EIpptcr.


From tie Chic 60 Evening Post.
"Why may not Imagination trace the
noble dust Of Alexander until he find it
stopping bank-hoIe ?" said / to Shak
~pere few days since.
And, Gussie," said he, "who was
Alexander ,"
Such Iamcntable ignorance
Everyone should know that Alexander
was a Macedonian, who had SHE'D his cas-
tor into every ring the world round, and
lied because he couldn't find any man who
would stand up and take his punishment.
lie was born on the corner Of Rhode Is
land avenue and Calumet street, in Mace
ionia, July e, the very day on which the
ambitious youth fred the Ephesian dome,
! Some people thought he was son of
Jupiter, who was in the wholesale thunder
business upon Olympus, bat Philip allows
/ that Alex. was his boy.
/ He early distinguished himself as a mule
+ trainer. 4 ThessaIian offered Philip q
mule named Bueephalus, but Phil. thought
the animal had too many tricks, and de-
! clined to buy him. Alexander had been to
Dan Rice's circus one Fourth Of July, and
/ had assisted at the Generalization Of a
mule with great success. lie tanned Blu
ccphalus completely, using only an oak
/ club and a number of ds and dashes.
He was very fond of study, and before
I he had attained his majority knew Mrs
Goose's epic compositions by heart.
After a while he succeeded his father on
the throne Of Macedonia, and contemplated
a grand sparing exhibition with the Per
I si;ns. He went down to Corinth to see
folks. \ good many people called, but
Alexander was disappointed that Diogenes
| didn't show up. Di. had sonrcd on hu-
mainly lie had been around the world
with a calcium light and had failed to FIND
an honest man. 1t is proper to remark
J however, that he hadn't called at New
York III. was living in the suburbs, but
was within the fre-limits. In order tC
avoid the ordinance, he lived in a tub.
Alex. went to see him, asked in what way
he could oblise 50 illustrious a tnb-filler.
by @elt"'s o"' q ny sr'''a',' P,',o
the philosopher. iIa.' exclaimed the
conqucror Of the world; "If | were not
Alexander | woald be some other man.
And then ne mafo"ea AFTER bariu'' 'n'
DoSs PERSIAN
Upon taxing ".rdIam ne ioHill a c'"r-
iot' fastened with cords ana was i"l'rme"
4 " that the rates mad decrecd tho empire
OF the world to the man VINO shouin unit
the Knot
Alexander tried bat found that the more
( he tried the harder the knot become.
Cut the Go.lon knot cried al inter
Alexander "i'!Ped o"' MS J"'" 4 ME
'''d SIT It,
The world shortly &'Ier was al MS iee''
The life OF A.eAander Is c4atN luII OF III
cidehts. ihey are 50 numerous that theN
cannot be mentioned even IN an eAtende.I l.
exhaustive and FeFaei'"S BIOGRAPHY '"cn
as tins iS-"ot'
Ohe iIItlc cAtfacIeiiSt!c occ"''"'o' i''"! :
. however, be mentioned. AieARnieF had
. been visiting the tomb OF cyrus the l"uA-
der OF the Persian eh'plFe-'' man "''se
death had cast 4 gloom over tie "holo
community 10 relieve himself Oh thc
melancholy ieeAh9a That ms Visit caused
Hlni, ami possibly q see i, hNe hou'>'''le'
ne could s'5a corner on 'Ae WHISKY ''i''rNeI'
Alexander ISSUED clfds o. INVITATION LOT :"
niue carous"I' lie PROMISED 'fia' 'te 'i'"''
VINO could drink mot should Il ap!c %
stand un. he crowned tar ms t,'fnrt ne
''1e'',''''I'I vas ''', ''' - ; me '".'''i 60
al" ,"'''S ,'.'tg var "e' f'''' i','Aer '"e
Do"'i''' '''"'''.i ""' So up 'o' i'.' ~
oo'''o' IL Fc'oFoi"s tue occurrence WIZ
70" mentions THAT .i'e oo"leS oi Tie Sl"l"
'''''H ,,'' -" : - '''o ','-I - an
~, en- r
'''' '-'''.''''''' ''.' III va" '0'i -
"'t' 'o' zoe l'''"e' anu i''i' III "'''i rus
Pec's o"'o one d gentle Sou'h ''Fcu WIZ"
i ''0O'e ann ''ioH' ! nam paine O4i'FieSS
81, mint
iie To'''u "''''er Tue '""ic.
Promachus, the victor, called for a fresh
quart, remark'nS that 1t was always best to
'ahe your ,'fuor straight. lie had DIS
Pos'u % io'',ee" ! 'ar's' AIcAaiiaer
crowned him. lie died three days after.
1t WIS thus that Greece rewarded her war
IL II
towns and toddy. tie never refused to
have something, and when Medina invited
him to carousal he could not resist. He
drank all that ri,b- o,l Tho nov, a., 81