The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1872-06-14

d am gittin old and am feel
II my years. Time wuz when ten
b dozen drinks more than yoosu
], didn't make any difference vii
J me, but it's quite diffrent now.
, tells on my old body, aud l hev /
: be guardid.
1 We he'd a ratificasyeu meet
!, last mite, at which 1 did inelud
e more than shood, and / fell aslee
in chair at Baseom,s, and dream
: ed dream.
In my cream / saw a higl
i elevated plain, bounded on tire
sides by a steep, PERCEPTIONS bluff
3 On the top of that plain-wich
pleasant and breezy place ft>wsz-
and back somewhat frgm the edg
W the precipice. stood that bildil
witch is the Mecca to wich all dim
ocrats hev bin turnin their eye
for the past twelve years-th,
: White House. On the very edg,
NV the precipics wuz a groupe o
| individOu..is wich | he'd no diff
Guilty in indentifyin. There WI,
Grant and ColfaX, and around en-
stood Morton, Butler, Sherman
Shellabarger, and a thousand 9th
ers Nv sich, while jist over theil
heads there wuz a fioatin in the
air the spirits NV Washington,
Adams, Jefferson, Linkin and all
Nv them deceest indiyidooals witch
would ev sympathized with the re-
publican party eff they had contin-
yood in the flesh.
Down at the foot NV this preci-
pice there wuz a low, swampy,
marshy, malarious destrikt, which
wuz the most uncomfortable seek
shun Nv country / ever see. The
ground wuz full NV cess-pools, NV
quagmires and quicksands. There
wuz bones NV niggers scattered all
over it-there wuz rooms NV old
skool houses; there wuz groceries
and 'sloons scattered about in wild
profession; there wuz broken
printing presses, and the cheerful
gallows-tree on which John Brown
he'd been hung wuz distinctly Wis
ible. Attempts he'd been appar-
emily made to kiver up the burnt
skool houses aud broken printing
presses and the gallows with reso-
lOoshuns, but the kiverin wuz too
thin, and they showed thro very
plainly. This spot was tenanted
by Boss Tweed and Hoffman, sur
rounded with Connolly, Oakley
Hall and all NV them fellows, and
and over their heads wuz the ghosts
NV Wigfall, Yancey and Benedict
Arnold. 1 thought 1 saw His
Majesty, Satin the l., sailin about
with the ghost of Yancey, but it
might hev bin some one else.
There wuz one quIcksand marked
where Seward went down-in 4
very bad smellin pool Chase wuz
tioatin about on board marked
Supreme Bench" maxim feeble
attempts to land somewhere
There wuz a few solid spots NV
ground, Moo York, Maryland and
Kentucky, and on them the live
men were standin. From this un-
promisin locality there wuz a path
up to the heights above, but it wuz
narrer, broken, crooked and steep,
and besides that, passage from the
lower to the higher region wuz
desperately opposed by the array
NV men who okkepied it.
l noticed that the party on the
bluff all wore sad expression.
The ghost of Linkin let fall a spir-
it tear, and Grant and Morton
lookt ez sad ez though they wuz
loosin their feathers. ColfaX in
partickeler, seemed inconsolable,
and was tarin his hair with greet.
Curious to know wat it wuz that
was cawsin all the csmmoshun l
shifted my position so as to get
view of the entire arrangement
and saw it at onct. Tweed and
Hoffman he'd histed up a long lad
der to the top NV the rock which
wuz really a curiosity. The sides
wuz made out NV hickory campane
polls witch done serVis from the
time of Polk down to Seymour;
and the rounds were spokes from
the wheels of Confedrit cannon.
The ladder wuz labelled "Cincin-
NATL" and the rounds ''civil servis
refOrm,' zone term,' and so on. |
Hoffman and Connolly wuz a hold
in the feet NV the ladder steddy, |
and Boss Tweed stood by EN-,
holdin out a scroll labelled ''Pres-
idency." On the top of the bluff |
stood Horris Greeley, clothed in
glory, and perfectly radiant in his |
attire. His old he'd wuz crowned |
with laurels-in fact he wuz a
walking arbor NV EN-. He he'd oae
foot on the first round of the lad
der.
SCUM bakr' shouted Colfax. I
SCUM 2 u.s." shouted the crowd
belo.
"Cum back to yure trends, you
idiotr' sed Morton.
"Cum to us, and you shell hev
this!' sed Tweed, Haunting the
scroll.
That settled him. Hiz face
changed from the innocence NV the
lamb to the hungry eagernis NV
the wolf, and down he went. He
made q mis-step and partially fell,
knocking off his laurels. His APP
pearance changed. The ladder he'd
heen roughly made and wuz full
NV splinters. His ekul rites cloke
caught on one Nv en- and wuz tore
off. a nail head on the next round
stripped off his protection coat,
another on the next knocked his
anti-corruption vest into smither-
Gems, his civil rights pants wuz
taken off by the next, and by the
time he got to the fourth, he wuz
Invested NV everything under heav-
ems witch made him sizable, and
stood there shiyerin in the wind,
mizerable, deformed, diminutiye,
weak, shaky, Shrunken man, with
nothin under heaven remarkable
about him but his white hat, and
the fact that he he'd one boot and
one shoe on.
Tweed and his friend saw this
shrinkin process goin on ez he APP
preached them, and they became
alarmed.
''Good Lordr' said Oakley Hall,
"ef he amt any bigger and more
than he looks now we can't make
eny yoose NV him. He'll never be
strong enough to pull us out NV
thisr'
Them on the bluff witch he'd re-
garded hiz deparcher with sick
looks NV sadness, bust into peels
NV laftare.
"There amt a hundredth part ez
much NV him ez we sposed," shout
ed they. We've nothing to fear
from him" and they LATED yocifer-
ously at the ridiculous figger he