The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1872-08-10
. INFORMATION.
Family Government.
IRON Hearth and Home.l

IETOm MA IL G4IA AAOAASs4
We do not say anything very original
when we say that the chief object in the
government of children should be to
teach a child to govern himself.
We know that most people think diff
ferently. orrather they believe different
". One can not dignity their mental
process with the name of thinking.
Most people believe. or atleast feel, that
the business they have in hand IN the
government of children is to conform
the child's will to their own. What is
falsely called family government is In
most families a selfish struggle between
the w~illfulness of the parent and the
Willfulness of the child, a struggle be-
tween the strong and the weak, In which
the weak goes down.
"But have / not right to be obeyedTo
asks some indignant parent who has read
thus far. We answer that your very
question betrays the selfishness of your
demand. You are thinking of yOurrlght,
and not of the child's good. Half your
failure lies just there. And1f you insist
on a categorical answer toyotr quesCton
in regard to your right, we answer with
more Indignation than you asked 1t, that
you have no right to exact Obed1enee
unless you exact the obedience for the
child's goodinstead of for your pleasure.
Mark, we do not say that the child, eX-
eept in fragrant cases, has q right to re-
fuse obedience. The child has nc right
to Judge of your motives or of your wis
dom, But you have no general right to
exercise your authority for the mere sake
of being obeyed. For, let us repeat, the
chief object of family gOvernmentshOuld
be to teach a child to do without your
authority.
Mr.. Beecher has saidin hisquaint way
that there is Just as much family govern
mentnow as there asformerly, but that
more of it is In the hands of the children.
Which is a matter not to be regretted.
The shoot must one day be severedfrom
the parent stem f.; the sooner it gets roots
enough to live by itself, the better. Ii
You have a child capable of governing
himself at fifteen, rejoice. Throw the
reins upon his neck and let him go his
gait. Self-government is only learned
by exercise. But if you wall a child in,
and circumvent him always by the res
traints of your own will, how shall he
eVer learn to stand alone? We have
seen a pine tree that grew tall and slen-
der in a dense forest, bolstered on every
hand by its fellows, SO that it did not
need to acquire hardness OF fiber. And
Il6N, WH6H Il FOdu was cut tLIOuSu t1f0
forest, we have seer thatself-same slen-
der, supple, upright tree left standing
without support upon n side. And at
the first wind it bent itself down across
the road, making itself into a bow from
sheer lack of strength to stand up. And
we have seen young men checked and
governed like infants, allowed to
stand upon their own responsibility-we
have often seen these weakly-upright
young men, when left without the sup
pors of authOrity, fall from lack of moral
stamina. They had never learned to
stand alone.
Achiid cannot learn to walk if he is
always supported. He can not swim if
he is never trusted in the water. He
will not learn to govern himself if he is
never allowed to try. When you want
to teach a child to direct a horse, you
give him the reins. When you want to
teach him to direct himseIf-you keep
the reins in your own hands and say that
tits your right to be obeyed! And for
tliisbit0f seffishness you choose to weak
en- your ellild's character. For though
this process ma not spoil every child, it
will permanently injure character in
every case.
Government in the family should be
administered like brandy in the family
ii is to be reserved forcases of necessity.