Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1872-01-15
.7LEI.7.N'DRI.7 GAZETTE
AND VIRGINIA ADV ERTIS +

exceeding eight lines, fifty cents
MARK TWAIN Az AN EouEsTRIAN.-1n In a
recent lecture on Nevada, delivered in Chicago
Mark Twain told Of horse trade that he
made there He speut considerable time at
Carson City.
Everybody rode horseback in that town. |
never saw such magnificent horsemansh,p as
that displayed in Carson street every day, and
| did envy them, though was not much OF
horseman. But had soon learned to tell .
horse from q COW, and was burning with lmpa-
tieuce to learn more. | was determined to
have horse and ride myself Whilst this
thought was ranking in my mind, the auction
eer came securing through the plaza on black
beast, that was bumped and - like u drome-
dairy and fcarfully homely. He was going at
twenty, twcpty-two-two dollars for horse,
saddle and bride.
\ man standing near me--whom | dldn
known. but who turned out to be the auction:
eers hrothcr-uoticed the wlStful look IN my
eve. and observed that that was a remarkable
horse to be going at such price, let alone the
saddle and bride. / said l. had half a notion
to bid. Now he says. Il know that horse.
| know him we'll You are stranger, take
it. You might think he is an American horse
hut he is not anything of the kind. lie is
Mexican plug-that what he ls-a. genuine
Mexican plug" but there was something else
about that man 3 way of saying it, that made
uc lust determine that would own genuine
And I said. "Has he any other advantages ?
He hooked his fngerin the pocket OF his army
shirt, aud led me to one side 81; ;.ttered, Sh !.
don't say a word He can outDuck any horse
in America he can outbuck any horse In the
world" Just then the auctoneer came along
'.Twenty-t,ur. twenty-four for the horse, sad
die and Bride" said. Twenty seven :"
Sold T.
took the genuine Mexican Plug paid for
him. put him in livery stable: let him get
something to eat and get rested, and then IN
the afternoon brought him out IN the plaza,
and some of the citizens held him by the head,
and Others held him down to the earth BY the
tail, and ! got on him. And as soon as those
people let 90 he put all his feet in bunch to-
sether let his back sag down, and then he
arched it up suddenly, and sot me one hun
dred and eighty yards; and came down again,
straight down. and lighted in the saddle, and
went ND again. And when / came down the
next time | lit on his neck, and seized MIN,
and slid back into the saddle, and held on.
Then he raised himself straight up in the air
on his hind feet and just stepped round like
member Of Congress, and then he came down
and went mp the other way and just walked
around on his hands just school boy would.
Then he came down on all fours again with
the same old process Of shooting me up IN the
air. and the third time | went up | heard a
man say, ooh don't he buck : So that was
''bucking.' was very glad to know it. Not
that | was enjoying it, but then had been ia,
king general sort OF interest in it and had
naturally desired to know what the name OF 1t
was. And whilst | was up somebody hit the
horse a whack with strap, and when | got
down again the genuine bucker was gone.
At this point of the interesting scene. kind
hearted stranger came to the rider. told him
that he had been taken IN, explained the my
sterious terms. and gave him the comforting
information that anybody in town could have
told him all about the horse If ne had inquired.
MICRoscOpIsTS- A woman protests VIGOROUS
lv. through the columns of the Scientific Ameri-
can against the abominahle revelations made
bv the professors Of the microscope, who have
DESTROYED her peace of mind She says:
Among the whole tribe of your scientific
men. there arc none who trouble me so much
az your microScopists am faithful! reader
Of your paper, taken by my son. and rejoice In
the modern improvements OF machinery OF al!
kinds; but this microscopic information about
what eat and drink is most appalling to my
scnSibilities.
How sweet was the recollection in former days
that cup Of cold water presented to a.good
individual entitled us to a reward By a kind
Providence Now that pleasant idea is aban-
doned; as according to these wise men, we
may give him horria worm which may be
his death, consequently, we deserve no re-
ward, to say nothing Of those creatures which
accompany said worm. After reading one OF
1,+, h, | rodnpaH m dnSnaIr.
my last refuge of pure things in the eating llhe
is swept away by these unmercltul mlcrosco-
pists.
'Oysters-thc pure delicious oyster. 50
nice when eaten fresh from the shel,-we
are informed, very coolly, have in them mu-
tltudes of small oysters swimming mmbly
about iu the juice, covered with shells aud
not content with making us put up with swallow
INK oysters. shells and ALL they numerically
add that the liquor contains variety (llsten
to their audacity in telling ns of a Variety of
animalcule; and. in their benevolent ~ love
of modern science, they gn on to say there are
three species OF worm also.
"Were it not for my belief in Jobs words
tpoor job would be informed in these days that
he had thousand worms in each OF his bolls J
After my skin, worms shall destroy this body, l
should fear death from inanition, as never could
he able to take the food convenient for me,
that the happy ignorant Agur prayed for ;.
''Then, too, these amiabe savans tell US, by
way Of reward for gulping down this nauseous
dose, that if we take our oyster into dark
room we will see luminous star. ;,
Il have tried to find relief from the ole
adage, Where ignorance is bliss, It's folly to
be wise, but having learned professor for
son, of course I have acquired little science
myself. and find it more difficult to do SO.
GROSS & BLACKWELLS PICKLES.
I S.ncoc Cstsuns Lea & Perrin's WorceS-