The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1872-09-21
q. Washington Smith Gathers
In His Cattle and MarkS'Ema.

q H HIS CG&GGAG G4MBQA W a24 ms N4AAS
&. Washington Smith, you lazy, big
nosed. l~Ong-earpd, slab-sidcd father
Of mine orphan children, put down that
corn cob pipe, stop gruntin, saddle up
3Ry mule, pull OFT Il best breeches and
put on yONr old, git out Of mig house,
and gather up my cattle and mark EN-
with My mark, do you hear, Ell ? Such
was the l0vin words spoken III the soft
est voice to the meekest man in st. Ian
dry by the best tempered wife | ever
had. inever had but one, and as I said to
c0nstituentsnOtl long ago i'll reference
to my mother, " | never spects to have
another Jemmima is Il sweet-tem-
pered woman, and as long as my spirits
held out Twas able to hold my OWL, but
now alas since Crisp's Troupe have de-
parted, my political platform busted,
half the hair of nay head scalded off by
my lovin wife for havin been caught
kissin my hand to Our jessie" and
Bill Sykes been dunnin me for that
wliskey bill, I've become demoralized,
lost my principles, Utiedthe durn thing
behind my saddle by the neck when l
left your town the other night, but it
got broke and all spilled Out), given up
the fight against Carpet Baggers, Black
Republicans, Liberals, RefOrmers, De-
m~Ocrats. and am tryin to get a seat up
OH my wife Jemmima's platform. I'll
succeed in dom it ! hope. She treats
me like my brother John Smithuscd to
do when we Went to bed: Nanny said
he was entitled 10 half the bed, but
durn him he always took his half out of
the middle, and | never did have room
enough to be comfortable. The plat
form my Jemmima sets on, she calls
"Woman's Rights" | amt a woman,
Mr.. Editor, and nc WOman ever mistOOk
me for Il member of the female
sex, but a fellow must have some
platform to stand on, aud sweet Jem-
! NINA has used cOnvinciR arguments to
make me believe that the safety of my
! country, the welfare of our people, and
/ nv own domestic happiness depends
on fOllerin her. Each night | says my
catechism i'll the folerin l0vin style.
| Jemmima points to the bOilin kettle OF
water, (shc always keeps it bOilin now,
and neal at HANDY and as she tlOurishcs
that lOng-handled tin dipper near my
nose, she asks mein IL heavenly whisper,
" George Washington Smith, do you
know what party you belong to nOW ?"
Yours, my beloved, l meekly reply
What's your politics? Yours, my dar-
lin Whose platform do yul stand on ?
| I OURS IuS SNCNlSSb : 4ld't - VtlA pun
tics ? Yours, ny angel! Whose prin-
ples do Won endorse ? Yours, my charm
er! Whom do you most admireq At this
question visions of POchOntaS as
played by Crisp's Troupe come before
my eyes, l get a frog in my throat
and turn the subject by admiring Jcm-
mima's Dolly Warden. This is the
question / am compelled ~tOrepeat every
blessed night of my life. 1t takes up all
mytime, and I'm afraidOn Of these days
when | arrive at the gate kept by St
Peter, and if he should out Of curiosity
ask me to repeat q few words of the
genuine article and / shouldn't he able
and I'm afraid | won't, | shall point be-
low to Jemmima and say, " thOu art tho
woman"
As | stated in the beginning, I wat
ordered to gather mp and mark mg
cattle, so | saddled up my mule ant
started for the prairie. 1t was time t.
brand 'em, or do sOmctIin to keep ZEN
ont other folks lots. They werea pub,
lie nuisance, were them same cattle, {
pawn, and a bellOwin, and dust raisin
till the people of St. Landry just per
lite1y id 'em, and me too in the bar
gain, forlettin sich ~Obstreperous critterr
loose. What better sense had they, II
like to know? They, poor devils, didn'
know who owned 'em, and tho my ole
black bull beloved and roared hi
very prettiest to let 'cm know wher,
they belonged, the foolish cusse
would stick their s every where
and get wallOped every where. But the,
have got the thickesthides, them hlasteI
calves of mine, | must acknowledge
t Well IweTe bound to mark'em. Pub
lie opinion was against anythin lyil
+ loose aroun the Parish, and Pm a ma
that respects public opinion +; so | gath
/ cred 'em up in a pen and began.
Now / must tell you, Mr.. Editor, tina
my mark amt a brand, but just a littl
ring put through the nose. It don't in
tcrfere with nOthin, not even stealth
: nor hoOkin !; but it gives one the viii
handle of 'em. Why, when the mos
cantankerous of 'em all is cuttin II
didOes, all | have to do is to give tn
, ring a tweak, and he folders like a lamt
That is, they used to, but nOW-jewhilli
| kins
Q After a mighty deal of trouble an
cOaxin, (Jemmima stood in there shaki
, a bundle of fOdder,) I got 'em in the per
!. and a mighty peart little spotted cal
. came In a head as much as to say " her
l am, who's afraid p | went up to hin
and what did I see ? When he bel
lowed and flirted back his wretche
C little head, there TGS another man
mark on the durn little cuss, where h
had been pOkin his meddlesOme littl
nose on somebody else's premise!
: That's what he brought back. IreckO
my two year old bull thought hard of j
! for he just kicked up his heels behind
beloved till you could have heard hin
. five miles Off, and Just went into SpOtt,
e He gave him a dig and IL hook. an
/ poor SpOtty lay there quiverin like
jelly till I ringed him. Then cam
: Grey's time. He had kicked up such
> row that / reckon he got weak, but h
cottoned to the ring and didn't bello7
once. In fact, he was right proud an
" set up" about it and it was realprett
e to see him struttin about, lOokin dow
at the ring hangin down from the end {
. his nose, Just u it he was a Commando
t injun at a wal feast.
t O, the awful times ! had with the1
calves The old black bull who ha
, a ring put in his nose q long time ag'
y stood there as solemn as ajudge, watcf
in 'em, and hookin and bellOwil
e when they broke through my old rOtte
: fence and got out. MOre'n a third {
= 'em kept jumpin out all the time, and
I kept drivin 'em back again. Ever
r time I threw one down to put a ring i
his nose, some of the burned cusst
would geteut. don't know what the
L was thinkin about to make 'em do S,
I May be they thought they ought to h
ringed first, OF praps they didn't war
y to be Tinged at-all.
J / write this, Mr.. Editor, to let tt
people of St. Landry know that tt
ringed calves is mine, G. Washingto
Smiths, every mothers son of 'em.
= they stray into other peoples lots, hol