The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1872-12-07

And bargains good to see.
For quarters to others throw,
Show Fifty cents TO ne !"
A Terre Heute girl exclaimed,
when she saw q Thomas feline ele-
vate his back: '.Oh wouldn't he
make a lovely hustle
A cynical bachelor, in speaking
Of ladies ball dresses, says: They
wear but little here below, but
they wear that little long.
John, the fool, says that pious
hack divers are scarcer than plaid
zebras, and that plaid zebras are
scarcer than toad stools with cane
bottoms.
A rural contemporary remarks:
'The yellow pumpkin lies golden
on the hillside in the country"
The poetry Of that remark induces
pie Gus thoughts.
A POOR but pious young lady
who earns living BY working on
hoop skirts, in reply to an inquiry
stated that she had spent the sum-
mer at the springs
Why don't they call ocean cable
dispatches thslagrams9 It is a
pretty, neat and classical name.
from two Greek terms signifying
'swords from the sea-"
Tie Danbury News calls atten-
ton to the light and airy nothing
ness now coming into market as a
gate hinge, and says no young
woman can safely trust her weight
to II.
A man hearing OF another who
was hundred years old, said con-
temptuonsly. s'Pshaw what fuss
about nothing. Why ii my grand
father was alive he would be $50
years old"
A little four-yesr old OF Boston
went to Providence, the otl.er day,
and in the depot was accusted by
Quaker lady, who asked "How d
art thou, little eirl2" Sire looked
up in the face of the Quakeress,
aud replied, "rm not art thou: I'm
little Jennie"
A San Francisco preacher ex-
presses the unqualified belief that
IL Judas Iscariot had lived in that
city he would never had hanged
himself, bot would have stood q
couple of trials disbursed his thirty
pieces Of silver in . judicious man.
ner and been free man to day.
The misery of being called up
on suddenly to make speech Was
got over by a mathematician, who
delivered himself in this fashion !:
"Gentlemen, morbid desire for
originality prevents me from say
ing, This is the proudest hour Of
my life,' and it does not occur to
me to say any thing else"
DIR. Fisk, of Dalserf, being mod
crate in his opinions, did not salts
fy, by his preaching tho Calvinistic
portion Of his flock. "Why, SIR"
says they, "we think you dinna tell
US enough about renouncing our
ain righteousness" Renouncing
your ain righteousness" vociferA-
ted the doctor" Il never saw any
ye had to renounce."
A very genteel and amiable
young man is not insane. He splits
his hair in the middle. The other
day, in combing it, he Glanced to
get two more hairs one side than
on the other. This destroyed the
balance of his head aud overtur-
ned his brain. He makes o verv
gentle lunatic, however.
A man at snake show in Paris
didn't believe the anaconda was
alive. He placed his log in the
case to show what an ilnpestor the
3torMian was, when Mr.. suake
r-...:..-.led to embrace the dog.
There was faint yelp cracking
Of bones. and doggy was in condi-
ton to be put right through sau-
sage-stuffer.
Tho Courier Journal says: III
General Grant is coming to Ken
lucky, We want to leave To which
the Chicago Post responds: "That's
what the rebs said when he came
to Vicksbu-g."
The cities of Peru and Ko'
komo have each purchased
steam fire engines.
Samuel Westfall, of Lafayette
died recently from the effect.
ofamputation Of IA humor on tn
palm of his hand.
An architect has boen EN-
ployed to draft a design 70
the buildings Of the propose,
exposition to be held in Ind
innanOlis next wear.