Litchfield enquirer., 1872-07-18
THE BlicHTgD LIFE.
A pHYsIc1Ax's STORY.

1t Is now some months since was rous- ed, very early one Sunday morning, by the deputy jailor of - County Jail, of which was then the attending surgeon, and requested to come at once to the jail, ] to attend a prisoner. who had attempted. during the night, to commit suicide. Rob ing myself as quickly as possible, I has tened with him to the prison, and, as the distance was considerable, gathered, dur ing our rapid walk, these particulars: The prisoner was a man apparently not far from fifty years of age, and had been com mitted, few weeks before, for drunken ness. He had appeared to be a man of more intelligence than most of the prison CTS, was very quiet, amusing himself ill his cell with writing, sometimes in a little book and sometimes on cards or slips of paper, which he distributed to the jailor's family and to visitors, The exquisite penmanship of these cards had attracted considerable attention, and the sentences written were generally moral precepts, or passages from books which indicated that he had received good education. Lat terly he had seemed quite depressed, and the night before had been overheard by some of the prisoners, talking to himself about conspiracy to take him, but no l one had supposed that-he had any inten- tion of committing suicide. By the time l had learned these facts, we were at the jail. and found my patient in the hall, to which he had been removed by the jail0r's orders as soon as his condition was discovered. In an extensive practice of several years in large city, part of the time i'll connection with a great h0spi- tai, it had never fallen to my lot to wit ness such determined and persistent eff forts to destroy life as this poor wretch had made. The only instrument which he possessed for the purpose was an old jack knife, whetted to sharpness, probably, on the floor of his cell With this, he in hicted ten or a dozen wounds upon his throat, plunging it into the thyroid carti- lage and turning it about until he had succeeded in cutting out portion of the cartilage the size of dime, and leaving a ragged and horrible wound. As this had not induced death, or insensibility, he had next thrust it in the sides of his throat, narrowly missing the carotid arteries, plunged it almost to it's hilt into his shoul- der, and several times into his side, where, however, he had struck the ribs each time, and finally, had buried the whole length of the blade in the pit of his stomach. So many and severe wounds had necessarily caused great loss of blood, which had sat- urated his cot and formed ghastly pool upon the floor, and this effusion had pro- duced fainting and insensibility. Admin istering some stimulants to Hasten reac- tion, examined his wounds carefully, and soon ascertained that, severe as they were, no great blood-vessels had been injured, and that recovery was possible, though certainly not probable, from the depress- ed vitality which was evident ill his whole
 
 however, the broad, capacious brow, and the face, which satisfied me, as the tailor had suspected, that he was an educated man.
 visited him repeatedly during the day. s and found that, when reaction supervened, it was accompanied by violent delirum, during the paroxysms of which he raved constantly of 8 woman who had informed his enemies where he was and induced them to come with her to carry him to prison and to execution. Under this de- fusion the expression of horror and dis tress in his face was fearful, and told too truly of years of suffering. Occasionally he would mnttar something of -forsor1es and escape, but so incoherently that I could make nothing of it. The next day he was evidently stronger, but the deliri- um continued, and if the watchfnlness of his attendants was relaxed for moment, he would spring from his bed and rush to some dark corner to escape from his ene- mics, who, he asserted, were searching for him. 'T :. su.
 Two or three weeks passed without much change in his condition; he had be- come rational, or apparently so, but con- stantly interfered with the dressings I put upon his throat, tearing them off and en- larging the wound. He did not rave now concerning his enemies, but expressed his firm determination to repeat his attempt at suicide, and the next time so effectual- ly that there would be no occasion for my services. This determination was evil dently not the result of physical suffering, which have never seen equalled; but the reason he assigned was doubtless the real one, that he was utterly tired of life, and that the mental suffering he had endured for many years had been so terrible that death was preferable. r.as
 By degrees, however, as his body wasted and weakened under the exhausting proc ess of suppuration, this earnest longing for death subsided; the eye, at first so fierce with delirious light, became mild and calm; the brow, which had been knit with the resolution of ending his long ag- ony by death, grew smooth and placid, and as he listened to the kind words of a devoted city missionary, who told him of the compassionate Jesus, who forgave and loved even the greatest of sinners, the tempestuous throbbings of his aching heart ceased, and he became, once more, like little child.
 Availing myself of this condition of mind, sought to win his confidence, and learn his history; for had become deep ly interested in the man, and was satisfied that his earthly career would soon close At first, he seemed reluctant to reveal to any human being the tale of crime and sorrow which had, for so many years, blasted his existence; but at length, satis- | fled of my friendly interest in his welfare, he requested the attendant to bring him his clothes and drew from one of the pockets manuscript notebook. tsHere, doctor, said he, 'tis the sad story of my sin and suffering, noted down as it occur-s red. can talk but little, for am too weak; but will only say, as introductory to what that will tell you, that though brought here as a vagabond, was not al. ways one. was born in Canada, of wealthy and highly respectable parents, and sent by them, at an early age, to one of the provincial colleges, where gradu- ated with honor. My father had been a merchant, and desired to see me, his eld- est son, following the same profession; and, in accordance with his wishes, I en- tered upon it. I was not extravagant, nor given to vicious indulgence; and about the time of commencing business, had mar ried one who was an honor to her sex, and whose memory I shall cherish as that of an angel on earth. do not think, how eyer, that possessed high order of bus iness talent; my preferences for literature were very strong, and though I was pru- dent, industrious, and attentive to my business, nothing seemed to prosper in my hands. My father died, and his prop lerty, which had been supposed to be very large, proved but just sufficient to furnish to my mother and sisters a home. As the great crash of 1837 drew on found my-