The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1850-1873, 1872-02-23
CONNUBIALITIES.
/ stood upon the oceans briny shore.
And with fragile reed ] wrote

! stood upOn the oceans briny shore.
And with fragile reed wrote
Upon the sand. ,w
The mad waves rolled By and blotted out
The fair impression.
Frsil reed Cruel wave Treacherous sand!
Ras Ra siis 1iss q si.ns MT Hsas SS5ii irnpluet
From Norway's frozen shore
Her tallsst Pine. and dip its top
| Into the crater of Vesuvius, l
And An upon the high and FURNISHED heavens
Agnes. I love thes!'
And would like to see any
1 Dog-goned wave wash that outl
To all unwedded folks-a happy
leap year.
Woman's isphere-the lack of ar
eligible offer.
Elopement in California is called
the Pacific slope"
King Louis of Bavaria broke hi.
matrimonial engagement with his
cousin because she ate prunes.
The young lady with speaking eye.
has made them quite hoarse by over.
using them.
A Fort Wayness has been married
three times, to Messrs. Robbs, Rob.
bins and Robinson, respectively.
There is never a man 50 bad, says q
celebrated writer, but some woman
loves him and has faith in him.
A patriotic gentleman in Mendon
has lessened the governments ex.
penditures $96 per annum by marry.
ing soldiers widow. Go thou and
do likewise. Patriots, to arms!
A Nebraska married man, who
elOped with q young girl, was pur-
sued, knocked down, beaten and re-
taken by his indignant wife. He has
gone out of the elopement business.
Dora d'Istra has recently written a
book in which she says that half the
American women are drunkards. and
that Mrs. Julia Ward and Mrs Howe
arc two Of the leading writer's of
poetry in the United States.
A quarrelsome st. Louis couple
were discussing the subject of epitaphs
and tombstones, and the husband
said: my dear, what kind of a stone
do you suppose they will give me
when / die 2" birthstone, my love!"
was the affectionate reply.
The inconsistency of woman shines
forth with great brilliancy in the case
of the New England girl who inform
ed young fellow that she hated him
with her whole heart and soul, and
in one hour thereafter sent him a
note stating that she would elope
with him that night.
An aIopod frop, Uya.to.n xroroo
recently got on the same train with
her eloping husband and his eloped-
with, and presented a revolver at her
faithless spouse's head, walked him
out of the car and proceeded to scratch
his eyes out on the depot platform.
Some one of an inquiring mind
wishes to know if the emancipation
of women was complete, and if COM
plete equality was established be-
tween man and wife by the law, as it
is already by the best moral instincts,
would it effect the interesting subject
Of popping the question, or would
the initiative remain as heretofore,
with the males?
An Iowa gentleman who was in
volved in domestic troubles met with
a genuine "JOb's comforter" the other
morning. Meeting an old friend,
who was q widOwer, he related his
troubles to him, and told him he ex-
pected to be broken up, as his wife
had commenced suit against him for
the sum of three thousand dollars
alimony. "Well," says the widower,
"I'll wait and see hOW she comes out,
and if she succeeds I'll 60 for her."
Here's true tale of woe, all about
a beautiful and abandoned wife in
this city. She married wretch who
loved her money not wisely, but too
well. When he got the money he
loved somebody else, and departed
for the trolling prairies of the mighty
West. VI" His earthly possessions were
burnt up in the Chicago fire and
then he came back to New York, and
put up at the Astor house, without a
cent in his pocket Remorse seized
him lit must have been remorse), and
the address of his lawful
partner, he thus wrote her:
II am here and penniless. Forgive
the past and come to my arms again.
This is what she wrote back
"I'I come as soon as can. Excuse
delay. I've gone to have loaded
head put on the cane you left"
He didn't wait! Remorse seized
him again, and carried him off. Finis.
-NeW York Commercial Advertiser,