Eaton weekly Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1866-1875, 1872-07-25

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How to make q Sciean1 sweepAWash
him. -4nss,a-s-sp.-----s-----
:; How tomalze time go faatAUse the
spur of the moment. Ix ..sav
HoNEY-BEEs are winged merchants-
they cell their honey. : 2ss51p
RAIIRoADs. have three dgauges: A
broad gauge, IS a narrow narrow gapges fnd a
ls3wHr IS the letter g like gentleman
who has left an evening party2 Be-
cause 1t makes one gone.
TaE storm signal man on top of
Mount Washington holds the highest
office in the giftsofs the nation."
WHY does B precede g IiD theSalpha-
bet2 (, Because you must be before you
can see. Do you observer
MANY recipes are given to Edre people
who are addicted to spirituous liquors.
The best preventive is to stop drinking.
MARK1AGEs are most numerous In the
autumn in massachusetts. Sc. .it'was in
Eden the first marriage was in the
early fall. ll3 IsTY aas 95gto
A CLERGYMAN said the other,day5 that
modern young ladies were not the
daughters of Shem and Ham. bht the
daughters;of; Hem and Shamlvo0
A MAN is usually. refused credit for
one of two reasons Lei ithera because we
don't know him, or lbeeagse Mssdes
AN exchange has; found ont Yhen
Adam was married of course 1t was on
his wedding Eve most'angbodseknew it
before. ~ e-,..,,,,e, .=dt 10
THE man who said two W. pI,orcupines
make one pficlzly PAR, is sa knight of
the quill, and not u profsssornefs the
higher mathematics. -
j, An old lady is inclined to thipk that
compass would be the best sewing ma
chime, because she heard 1t had needle
with thirty two, points,t flaliaxa ara
A WEsTERN editor, WHO lS q doeSpf1it, fi, know
that, sfore garden smakipg, iaicad-iron
back, with. a hinge in it, would be an
innp5fov vement on the spinal column' now
in use. .vfriT III sbH9 smas ohS
aHERE,s your in waders,n shpute. a
member of the T1th Mississippis regi-
ment 1as aG mo11es's Veterans aarmy
plunged into the PotppaS opy itsIYay to
liGettysbhrg And here's your wetter-
! ,lfns, ECHOED aeGai1ant sold7er Of the
4tfh AlabarFrpia,s lap Fpi,s anomn7s7o2 tCol
house nd Clntoho street, Bf0oklyh, re-
Gently, to- deliyer IA yboNa He rang the
bell, and Servant girl opened the door,
when the expresshaif said 2 eas'I ohave
got al asschnan pe1s end eff gept likes, !
| win carry It upstairs The girl looked
thorfor sstrickeDs and, not Srelishitfg the
idea of admitting a uan5yith smallpox,
| slammed, bolted and barred the. door in
the astonished expreesinan 8 Face:
RoMRo' was a selfmads elephant. He
came to. this country Hitbet ettasdulaar in
his pocket-had nothing in the, world
but an empty trunk kAand at the time
of his death he was worth $40,O 900.
WnY is the letter R very unfortunatef
Because it is always in trouble, wretch
edness, and misery in the beginping of
riot and rum, and is never found IN
! peace, innocence, or love.
D AT the late Plymouth Church picnic
Mr.. Beecher was asked why, he didsnot
| dance. aThere is but one reason,n he
replied; don't know how. The only
dancing ever, l did was when my. father
| furnished the music and used me as
fiddle. 1 took all the steps then..ois
"A POOR little Sunday school scholar in
Wisconsin was deluded into, learning
| 3,73O verses of the Bible in four weeks
| by the promise of book. They gave
him "Hitchcock's 8 Analysis of the Bible" "
| He snapped it for two-bladed knife
| and n neck of hickory nuts. ~ y