Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1872-09-24
Sallie's Bedtime.

Sallie's Bedtime
A father not very far from here. read in tht
paper the other morning that the Utica pirl,
VINO want their beaux to go home the same
night they call, pull string at the proper houl
winch reVerses picture, on the back Of which
appear the words Ten O clock is nv bedtime. .
This father. who has daughter given to late
hours when certain youth sits up and helps
her keep them, thought he would try this Utica
plan, SO he wrote In large characters, on the
PACK OF a huge portrait of George Washington,
this inscription: =
l0 O'CLOCK Is sALLIE's BEDTIME.
Then he arranged the picture SO that when be
attacned string to the frame, be could reverse
1t from his bed-chamber. f5ut when SalIie on.
tered the room an hiour later. her aesthetic eve
was 9uerae "a by observing the portrait of Geo.
;.ian3.ng slightly out of plumb, SO to speak, and
IN adjusting it her fathers little game was re-
ves.ied in all its subtle ingenuity.
Sallie was not Utica girl, however, SO she
just went to work and neatly effected the figure
''0,'' leaving the standing solitary and upright
difference in her bedtime That night. us us
ual. SalIie received visit from her young man
which his front name it was Henry and her
paternal parent attached his string to G.. WIS
portrait, and retired to his downy couch.
About ten o'clock. while Henry and Sallie
3 were-deeply absorbed in some knotty problem.
with their heads so contiguous that you could
not insert piece of tissue paper between them,
the Father OF his Country suddenly turned his
face to the val, as i ne was ashamed to gaze
upon such doiDgs. Henry, with sudden start.
glanced at the picture, and saw the hand writ.
ing on the wall, as it were, which read 81 o'clock
is Sallie's bedtime" Then Henry looked At
Sallle with an Interrogation iu his eve. which
was partly dispelled by the fair maid murmur.
ing, Its all right, ~ Henry said of course It
was all right-that he had long known one
O'Clock was her bedtime, and he thought il was
plenty late enough, too, for a young girl to be
out OF bed, but what business, he said, had
George Washington 8 portrait to be foppine
about that way Then Sallie explained-and
the twain resumed work on the problem. Henry
g putting his arms around Sallie to prevent her
falling off the chair. ems
Meanwhile the old man was listening for the
front door to open, and his would be-son-in-
laws footsteps pattering over the pavement
with the toes of his boots pointing from the
house. These. sounds not falling upon his ears.
and thinking may be the old thing didn't work
right, he gave the string another pull. and
! George W. again faced the audience. Then he
listened, but he heard no footsteps--nothing
but a peculiar sound, something resembling the
popping of champagne corks.
linen he grew Cross and gave the string an
other jerk, causing G. w to turn about with
violent suddenness, just as if be was dreadfully
out of humor, too saea ee3.ll
And still all is quiet beow-except that nom
ping sound 2
Then the string was pulled sgain--and again
just ready TO explode WIS., .no o,u NV e e "Go
fifteen minutes d. .1oD rags Anu iot 1uny
man Who al he have the portrait of the
Air could not tell lie turning excited
II. Az HON, foh
ed gymnast until he fell asleep exhausted
Salie's father fell asleep, not the portrait.
Henry kissed Sallie good night at one o'clock
A. M, remarking as he did so that it would
seem like a long, long, weary year ere he would
see her again-because, you know, he dldn
expect to see her again until the evening OF
that day.
The next morning her father examined that
portrait, and when he fully understood the
situation be was panied. He shed silent tear,
detached the string, sponged out the inscrip-
ton, and walked away with the weight of fifty
FIVE years on his shoulders-that being his age.
He says girl who will go back on her father
that way would just as lief as not disgrace her
parents by marrying Congressman.-LB b.
Dadd in Norristown Herald.
SAYINGS BY JOSH BILLINGs.-Thare il nc
person worth being jealous of who il willing to
be the kauze of it.
Wise men have but few konfdents, and cum
ming ones none.
Pashunce il good thing for man to hav,
provided he don't hav too much Of it; thare
il point at which paschunce begins to be ig-
norance.
Take the mystery out ov things and they lose
two-thirds ov their attrackshun.
When a man il thoroughly lazy he is good
for nothing only tew shoot at
Thare would be mighty few sekrets in this
world if folks would tend to their own bizness.
The man who wears out liz like a nimble six
pence-he is aiwus worth the face, and keeps
bright to the last
Natur never half finishes job, nor under
lets kontrakt.
Take all the dangers out Of this world and ii
would be towards paradise
Thare amt ennything that will completely
kure lazynest. but have known a second wife
to hurry it sum.
A good natured man has got one of them
kind oy souls that will grow ennything that is
planted la it, good, bad or Indifferent.
Thare are men in this world whom fattery
makes stronger, becaus it makes them more
kareful; but such men are skaTse.
Yu kant larn piggln tew fill itself, nor a snail
tew trot fast.
The only safe way for most people to git
along 10 this world il to watch others and do
list as they DO
Human happiness IL like Joseph's coat-a
thing of many colors.
| kant tell which IL the wuss of, the man
who is all he'd and no heart or the one who il
all heart and no he'd
Hope is no fatterer-she cheats everybody
alike, but, after all, il the best friend we hav
got Everybody seems to despite hippoknt
God, man and the devil.
An idle man is always a lazy one-he spends
all biz time hunting for nothing to do.
Thare are but phew people in this world who
makes more trouble than a bizzy phool.
Knowledge is power no doubt, but it is not
always virtue-there are some people who only
educate their vices
Every man should know sumthing oy Law
ii he knows enough to keep cut of it, he il
pretty good lawyer
Waiting TOR ded mans shoes IL lust az
mean az stealing the shoes before he dies.
The best reformers are those who are all the
time trieing teW reform themselves. TINS nre.
senting to the world one good example. worth
at least dozen receipts.
A quaint Scotch minister was given some
what to exaggerating in the pulpit His clerk
reminded him Of its i'll effects upon the con-
gregation. He replied that he was not aware
OF It, and wished the clerk, the next time he
IN