The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1872-01-31

Renee. Surely, In the vortex OF Lonuoh'
ones identity could be lost!
Tl,at night sleep came, and the Whoie VI y.
the next day illness kept me prisoner. al; IL
,vas the reaction; the mind, though SUN
stradfast and firm, could not altogether Inils-
ter the body, which was weak and tenae =.
At last. shaken and feeble, l succeeaeu IA
| dressing. Horrors of horrors! on countins
nv small stock of money found it wouid J, DC
barely sufficient to pay the expenses o. .nS
past day. Hastily put on my D4h 41eat nna
started in search Of a situation. l, oca..i s1,
Byng A list was given me, put AZ e :.t
house where I applied the place nau Iu os
been filed up. Having parted WIN SOM NJ, VI
nv Jewels, continued in search LOT st.un
ton, and ut tile end of few weeks Was ss ga
to see lady who was looking OUT LOT . nii Nv
for her daughters. How odd 1elC 10 W
TO-, into her nresence Us a servant! i
know behaved strangely, illness Lao nilluS
mo nervous: after putting . few generai
questions the lady asked for my character.
~ have not lived out before" ahs"eleu ,,
"Then, at all events, young "ohi'n' w.
can give me some reference" s1, ,o,,
..No. ma,am," said, 81 can only ASK yoII
to fry me without any one speaking ioi Lie :
will do nv utmost to please you. sc .rrs
WHn,lIv. this is most abomlnaole Va ~,
pognrs sending me person Wltilou' "n!
49, stSE,s,tor. nav 20 instantly. never nave
ANYTHING TO do with such ms you c,oo o,d
hm7ninr blush overspread my lace, ant
r ,,it,,Ircyy How got out OF the nouee
| i,ro,y not. That was the last sltu'a.on -
,r,o,,ld seek, Utterly hopeless, ana worn ouI
", r,inJ and body, walked up anu uo"n
th -, terra terraces and squares dreading TO 60 pach
VI tt,I NV lonely room, though fearing to De seen
~ a., rsoconnizcd even now. One thought alone
1 hronrht comfort; far better this life, eVen'
than fhat of the bctrothed of Mr.. LonaX.
If seemed to my excited Imagination that
nronlc put their heads out of their carriages
70 look after me; | wondered to myself II l
looked as strange and unreal rs / felt. walk
jn- along. l caught glimpses of comfortable
kitchens. bright fires, and groups OF merry
servants. It was just dusk. At one house
n ca1riage-load Of children was being put
down-one young mother even came TO The
door to meet her child-there was joyous
Greeting and much laughter. Howt the voices
| thrilled through me! So had l once beell.
And now a fugitive and almost starving, l
crept along. How good the smell OF that
dinner being cooked! Il had tasted nothllS
that day.) 4 peal of bells struck my en-.
Christmas eve! so il was. Choking pack
nv tears. I fastened on; no Christmas greet
inrs for nc-no kiss, no presents, no JOY.
No ono to take any care whether l lived OF
died.
| lodging: they came and told me even tliere
that they were going out to family gamer
| ing. uo,,, Lot ma
| be-"
The h,ndlady looked at ME sorro"lrily.
and saving ! had best go to bcd ana get
1yarrl--I had no 1irc--slld she would sehG
mo up some ten, left me to my own sau
| thoughts.
Rittrr tears came to my aid, my brain else
had Lrcn crazcd: repentance for my rash
step hcran to make Itself felt; conscience
WHISPERED that hid not considered suill-
GENTLY its possible effect upon others. Alter
,ll was not the punishment mcritcd! But
| then the Notwithstanding with man
dcsniscd rs well rs hated! All, well! Wei
come death before that.
The Christmas bells rang all that evening
and far into the night. / sank into sort OF
trance; cold and hunger were alike forgot,
ten. | saw weIl-lit room, warmth and
| plentv prevailed; merry, childish figures ran
abo,t nv father sat at the head OF Il Well
covered table, round him were many bright
faces: q little Girl dressed to represent Christ
ms danced up to him; he took her up IN
his arms and kissed Ter brow. 1t was my
self. ! tried to speak--and aWokc.
Where was /! Was it really me lying
there all alone with The cold moonlight on
nv forehead: Was l still dreaming! l sat
lm and gave shuddering glance around.
Al. YES This was all real. and had run
away from home: so l had. 1t seemed a
! lonn time ago-vcars almost. How odd and
i'll I felt Surely | was not going to die
there. in that room all alone: l screamed
| alouG-therc was 10 ANSWERING one needed
the lonely lodger. put my clasped hand
above my head and prayed for Guinness and
help in inv extremity. Then my thoughts
wandered again to death; perhaps l should
he found there in the morning lying cold and
stiff: thew would shake their heads and
murmur, Poor young thing" The land
lady would find 4 directed envelope III my
| pocket, and then my father would come up
and identify me. L should be put i'll my
coffin carefully and buried i'll some London
cemetery among strangers, far away from
any one who had ever loved me. My iaIhcr
would repent then his harshness--perchance
wecr-too late. He would look at Inc so
still and white, and know it was his dong
that lay there. How sad il would seem to
see one so young dead! Would my face
change much, l wondered: They would
let my long hair down on the pillow, ana
perhaps strew Il few flowers over me; caring
for me TOO E,tc--too late. Mrs. Byng would
then cricve, and Mr.. LolnaN also. But where
should be, the that lay there!
Sleep came ut last full or troubled dreams
but blessed, as it brought forgetfulncss OF the
present. Christmas morning, i'll trying to
rise. tainted: so | had to remain where
was, They brought Inc food out of pity
The woman of the house sat by my bedside,
and begged to be allowed to write to my
friends.
..Thcre must he some one who cares FOL
YOU. poor child" she said.
40 one" l sadly answered; "only LEI
me alone"
The next day she again stood at the bot
tom of ny bed. Her husband wanted hi:
rent. lie refused even to get bread until h
was paid. He could not change his resolu
ton. Payment, or else was to be turned
. into the street, i'll or well.
"Iou shall have your money, and l viii
quit the room to-day" l said, as [ emptlet
the contents Of my purse into her willin!
hands. There Was only just enough, not
penny over, and all my ornaments / hat
already paWDeu. llt 10 10 next, AUS,
knew not.
Despair gave momentuy strength. ros
and dressed NE. One look at the glass be
fore left. no one would recognize Bcatric
Byng row; no further taar of That. Sunke1
ewes. hollow checks, white lips. The oil
bright Beatrice Byng, then, was really alread
: dead it was merely her spirit OF her shos
that moved along now.
Mechanically took up my bag, and passe
out of the house, homeless and friendless.