The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1872-05-17

JERSEY CRY youth keep the police.
men in proper state of subsection by
stoning them regularly.
The reason why Horace Greeley on.
poses female suffrage is doubtless because
the ladies are all free.traders.
The baseball fever is breaking out all
over the country, and promises to as.
sumo an epidemic form again.
A NAN carries pound and three
quarters of phosphorus about him, and
it's no wonder ae sometimes gets light.
headed o. nights.
If some one would only get up a sew
ing machine to collect rents, mend man.
ners and repair family breaches, what
sale it would have.
A LITTLE Rock, Ark, paper takes
pleasure in announcing the erection of
peanuttery as an evidence of the ma.
terial progress of the city.
A NEWLY married couple from Iowa
Falls, Iowa. on arriving at the hotel at
Fort Dodge, left their marriage certif.
cate on the Office counter by way of
guarantee.
A MINISTER who thought that report.
ing sermons was all vanity, afterward
concluded that if the thing must be
done it should be well done, and slipped
greenback into the reporters hand,
saying, "Do not condense me-"
NUMEROUS residents of Lafayette, Ind,
have established Druidical "grove,"
and their wives have got from the cir.
culating library all the copies of the
Mystery of Edwin Druid to learn
what sort of doings are contemplated.
HORACE GREELEY having heard Ger.
tain man alluded to as the leading milk.
man of Connecticut, wrote to him to
know whether he was at present cult
waiting cocoanuts or COWS, and which he
found most profitable for butter and
cheese.
Why should an autograph hunter
naturally call on Messrs. Edward Eggle.
ston, +. E. Hale, Emerson Etheridge, or
(were they livine) Edward Everett and
Col. E. Z. Ellsworth for autographs, with
reasonable hope of success. Because
they all write their names with great
Els (great ease).
SAN FRANCISCO has grown to be great
mart for raw furs. The furs imported
last year were valued at over two mil.
lions. All the Alaska furs and those
from Eastern Siberia now pass through
San Francisco as the nearest route to
their market, in this country or in Eu.
rope, and the trade is rapidly growing.
Mr.. LINCOLN used to tell story of
boy who was ordered by his father to
scare stray urchin off the premises.
He departed on his mission with a
turkey gobbler' strut, and shortly re.
turned with discolored optic, bleeding
nose and very much demoralized, and
told his father the darn'd boy didn't
scare worth cent"
"HoxE AND SOCIETY,"" in Scribner's, is
to be enlarged and improved. Some of
the most accomplished of American
women writer's will here contribute to
the ediication of their country.women,
in matters of household economy, dress,
social ethics, the culture of flowers,
home decorations, etc., etc.
Some twenty unfortunate young Phil.
were arrested in the City of
Brotherly Love on Sunday last for
lounging on corners. Considering that
deems it sinful to keep
open libraries or other places Of limo
cent recreation on the Sabbath, and
that its bar.rooms are closed OH that
day, it would really seem as if the aver.
age dweller in boarding houses had no
al orn ativo h,,t IN 1o,,uuo ~, cnrvare