Knoxville weekly chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1875, 1872-09-04

than three hundred years .old is regarded
as unworthy of investigation, though on
rare occasions we have bestowed some
slight attention on places not quito up to
the figure.) So behold your amiable tour
| ist enquiring "how old ii is.n
Don't know mum, but it Is the old
! dining-room, mum, as Lord Derby was
taken out of, mum, to be beheaded
num-
OF course an old dining-room, anybody
had been taken out of to be beheaded, was
blessing to prowlers, and consequently
we hailed the prospect with public mani
festations of delight. We would see that
old dining-room or perish in the attempt
So we went, proceeded by the small boy
and sister, and il was an experience not
easily forgotten The small boy having
learned his lesson, was filled with plaus-
ible desire to earn the customary "back-
sheesh" always say 'back-sheesh,' it
sounds traveled) without assistance from
and consequent division of results with
the feminine portion of the firm, but the
young party in question 1oouid chime in
and refusing to be suppressed on any
terms rather detracted from the general
distinctness of the explanation by making
il a sort of chant like excessively High
Church. / think that was the best part of
the fun altogether. 1t wasn't so much the
old dining-room which was an excessive
| ly dingy, dilapidated and disreputable old
dining-room with nothing in it, and which
suggested to my mind the,idea that Lord
Derby must either have wanted little
here below, or been in extremely reduced
circumstances, when he twas took out of
it to be beheaded." And As to the old stairs
and the old passage and the old door
which had subteranean passge behind
it--well they were as rickefy and worm
eaten an old pair of stairs and as mouldy
an old passage and as useless and creaky
an old door as one would wish to meet
with. But there's the fun of being tour
list. You enjoy the excitement of giving
people shillings and half crowns for i'm
parting to you the valuable information
that an old door Is an old door though the
widest freak Of imagination could never
lead you TO fancy it was a new one. Eure-
ka, 1t has suddenly occurred TO me that
/ can. account for Lord Derby. He must
have had something to do with Charles
the First. If he didn't, / don't see how
he escaped it, because everybody else 1
have heard of yet had, andsI know Charles
the First went to Chester expressly to
stand in tower on the walls and watch
his army defeated by Cromwell on Row
ton Nor, SO that they would have an ex-
cuse for charging shilling to go into the
tower from that day to this. My expert
ence with Charles the First was like Mark
Twain's with Michael Angelo-I was
rather glad to hear he was dead, and i
think my joy was rather added to when i
found that he died suddenly and with the
assistance of the State executioner. My
principle grievance is that he was not a
domesticated character. He was too fond
of going to see his friends and staying all
night when he got there. 1t looks to me
as though he rather sponged on them. He
slept at nearly every castle in the United
Kingdom, and when he could lot go him
self he generally sent friend, and the
guides charge you an extra half crown
for telling you about it. The fact is, he is
becoming monotonous.
"This is the old passage, num-" These
| are the old stairs, num-" They was
thinking of building a museum behind
the old door, and now they are thinking
of not building one" &C., &C., &.
And for this valuable information your
amiable tourist delivered up "backsheesh
extraordinary" feeling satisfied with the
fun of nothing else