The Ottawa free trader., 1872-10-12

The NeWspapers.


with personal abuse of opposing candidates,
denunciations, couchel in 10 stint of invecJ-
i've and vituperaticn Here and there We
find au item oi news free from political bias
or intention. These We eagerly grasp and
search for them with that interest aad deep
longing with which the traveller seeks for an
oasis in the desert.
Here is one item found in the Joliet Rcpnb.
icGn.
"A man named Smith, was killed by light
ming at Wilmington, last Saturday evening""
The Smiths are So numerous that we can't
help seeing how the lightning could help
striking one now and then.
The paper above alluded to gives an nc
count of how hog attempted t. root up the
city of Joliet, as it We're. Ee cot rs far as the
depot of one of the railroads, nearly oyerturn-
ed one of the buildings there, threw freight
train off the track, busted a corn bin and de-
luged the whole settlement with corn, aud,
in the catastrophy four men were nearly
killed. The Railroad company will sue the
would sue the hog, but he is dead now, and
as the next best thing to SUNG dead hog,
will sue the city! They will sue the city for
damages. We suggest that they sue for re-
pairs, Cor isn't repairs always preferable to
damages. Gays "Beemus,' says he!
The Home Journdl, at Lacon, edited evident
ly by man who has been there, ''by moon
alone" says thusy:
A t,1v txllc tl,,t ,l,,
girl living in the country, she used to "plant
corn in her bare feet.' This lmpars new
idea of the origin of those troublesnm. .hings
We are glad to see him corn. cred He need
not be lonesome, as we have been there too
we've been corned ourself
Following IN the same strain.er the J0uYnal
says
An editor once wrote: ''We have received
basket of strawberries from MIR. Smith, for
which he will receive our compliments, some
which are four inches in circumference"
Was 1t the Jomnol, the editor, Mr. Smith,
the basket, the strawberries, 'our compli-
merts," or what, that reached the prodgoius
circumference alluded to?
We know of no paper in tie world that
would abuse the dead, yet the Journal rs
aforesaid as the lawyers have it, speaks in ap-
parent words otpleasan ness of party who
Gin Tennessee rose up IN his coffin and
asked ii that was tie way to treat a fellerr
Now we are astoniShed The Frecport
Bulle'in says:
The receipts Cf the State Fair at Ottawa are
IN round numbers So, 900, about 81, 600 more
than the expenses.
Tue Legitimate expense of the State Fair
amounted to $4,000, Sixteen from Fifty two
thousand. leaves -----: We wish we could
whistle on paper
y newspaper edited by man who is still
ont If Lunatic Asylum says:
farmer residing near Carrolton, IN die.
ging well, found IL set of teeth an inch aud a
halt square each. and three inches long. at a
depth OF thirty-siX feet. And q lot o! peri
winkle shells.
Wha' might That man not have tound had
he but gone an inch deeper The Freeport
Bulletin, publishes marriage licenses under the
head Multiplication Table"
We suppose that should any of the parties
it refers to appear al Chicago it would name
them among its personals. under the head OF
"slmple dlvision.'
An exchange, whose editor don't like red
headed girls, maliciously remarks;
A man who has u red.headed sweetheart.
addressed her as "Sweet Auburn. iovelies, of
the plain" Sweet Auburn got mad about it.
She objected to be classed with the ..plain,n
even though call the loveliest of them.
Why do they abuse the red.h-adca girls
we are one OF them--nota girl we mean,-but
somewhat ploin, hence our pain tive pr,'c<.
that's why we rise to erplain. Still its bet.
ter to be called Sweet Auburn of the p.ln."
than to have il translated as 1t nigh, hr-
red-headed ofthe paririe" No call us "swcr,
Auburn Of the PLAIN"
The Mendoza Bulletin. apparently in t.r.
condition, says:
suit OF paper clothing COW hc lIa,, il =
ton for siXlty-two and IA l... rents. E,.n AN
editor can afford to dress well now.
just imagine the editor e: The Mendo;.
Bulletin in rain storm, after two hour, rx
perlence in such dress. Gn"i Lord defend
US