Eaton weekly Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1866-1875, 1872-07-11
Varieties.


CREwEL-Worsted work. - 49,
The fate of fiowers-To be blowed.
A WOUNDED reputation is seldom
cured.
A GRAVE mistake-Burying a man
alive. Ji ..stt 9'.i s-fisf
A MAN who don't know anything will
tell it the first time he gets chance.
THE present condition of jerusalem
is represented as filthy and beggarly.
AN article you can always borrow
Trouble. ,.,....,s
TIE land of Cane-The place where
sugar comes FROM iitrJ 5d
A LITTLE girl described a snake as a
"thing that's tail all up to the head"
being able to remember the word, said
she wanted thing to brush the
warmth off with"
lT4Eword love, in the Indian Language,
is "Schemlendamourtch How
nicely it would sound, whispered softly
in lady's ear-ssI acknowledgements
wager you." - l.. s4stf stst
"SEE therep p exclaimed returned
Irish soldier to gaping crowd, as he
exhibited with some pride hat with a
bullet hole in it. " Look at that hole,
will YOU? You see if it had been q low
crowned hat should have been killed
outright l'
A LIBERAL sympathizer with the work
ingmen's movement, down in Indiana,
has adopted the eight-hour system on
his farm. He let's his work-people be-
gin at 8 in the morning and quit at in
the evening.
"MRs. M1FF1N," said visitor, EN-
ma has your features, but / think she
has got her fathers hair" "Oh, now
see," said the "dear little Emma; !" it's
because have fathers hair that he has
to wear wig" ilsi
"TALK about the jaws of death, = ex-
claimed MAJ who was living with his
third scolding wife: 81 tell you they're
no touch to the jaws of ife." 51cJ
A JUDGE, pointing with his cane at
prisoner before him, remarked, There
is q great rogue at the end of this
stick" The man replied, CAT which
end, my lord ?" IN, .-s.
AN archaeological correspondent adj
duces as evidence of the antiquity OF
the game of euchre the passage in the
New Testament which relates how, the
priest and tie Levite passed and the
good Samaritan assisted" 5at cg
GEoRaE-"T There, Aunt Mary what
do you think of that2 drew the horse
and Ethel drew the Jockey" Aunt
Mary-"H'mI But what would mamma
saw to your drawing jockeys on q Sum
| day p, George" All, but look here
We've drawn him riding to church, you
| knowr
A FEW Sundays since a teacher in the
| Sunday school of an Episcopal church
| in Chicago said to one of her pupils
james, what good thing-what great
| pleasure are you willing to give up as
| sacrifice during the Lenten season 2"
| Jimmy meditatod about ten seconds,
and responded: '' / think I'll give up
going to Sunday school," o.f7,
Mrs. MUFFIN latter thirty miles
ride by exp,ess) )-"Muffin, there's some
thing wrong; the passengers are getting
out on the wrong side" Muffin
"Why, don't you see you are riding
with your back to the engine !; it's all
| rieht.n Mrs. Muffin" Back to the en-
ginel If I'd known it, what a head
ache | should have hadr
AN august Senator, who is getting .
little bald, was the other day asked by
his heir, "Papa, are you still growingf'
"No, dear; what makes you think sor'
"Because the top of your head is COM
ing through your hair" f,fss
A POOR woman in a pit village not
very far from the banks OF the Wear
was lately about to have her child vac
cinated. To assure her that the mat
teri was coming from healthy child
] the surgeon mentioned its name. /" Ma
ma, canny man, that bairn belangs tiv 9
, thievish tribe. Aw divvent want mI
bairn to be myde thief"
THEY were having very solemn anc
pleasant funeral in Scituate few year
ago, when the sole daughter of the hous'
: and hearth suddenly discovered tina
> her particular enemy in school was sit
r ting in her favorite chair. She bore i
as long as she could, but her feeling
= | gave way Just as the minister arrives
: at pathetic point in his prayer, AM
p the people heard this affecting prophes
/ as the joint production of the ministe
. | and child: "And the Lord. as soon a
;. our friend enters Heaven, will say unit
/. her -" Get out of my chair, Ell
e BriggsP'
r AN Englishman and his wife who II
n Gently undertook a journey into tn
country of the Bedouin Arabs, withoJ
=, a guard, were robbed of their baggag'
. money, clothes and valuables-the gel
q tleman having to beg of the robbers
copy of the Times newspaper in whic
= to clothe himself and wife. The hu
band returned to Jerusalem in tn;
i valuable journal, his wife being wrappe
,e up in the supplement.
le If a man has a great many debts, al
they every much to his credit.