Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1872-12-17
Les2tch for Htenso,.ssfS.

Count de Paivol shot himself 10 Paris recent
~. because his landady gave him notice 10
quit. Such fine feelings il this neishborhood
would soon fill a graveyard.
Levi Brown, of PoyRan. Michigan, thought
ne could hold playful young bull by the tail,
out his widow now says "he could never stick
TO any, hing ten minutes 10 his life"
An instance Of throwing ones self about was
Witnessed few evenings ago at party in the
case OF young lady, who, when asked to sing,
hrst tossed her head and then pitched her voice.
A young man went into florists store in
Boston, TO buy rose bud for his aft anced.--
seventy i've cents was the price asked "Win
1t keep! inquired the young man. Oh, yes
long while. Then you may keep it," Exit
young man.
An editor in the upper end of this State saws.
we ezpend $500 900 600 yearly for LIQUOR 10
orinkipg And his paper has a circulation of
only seven hundred copies, too. We don see
any use 10 nan exaggerating that way, even
IT he is an editor
Connecticut editor. having got into con.
troversry with a contemporary, copgratulates
blmself that his head was safe from q don
keys heels = His contemporary astutely in
ferred from this hat be was unable Ito make
both ends meet"
"1Lfatabe rubber bustles' are announced
They are said to lmpart great buoyancy to the
movement, ln case of shipwreck they would
1hdnuhtedly be advantageous, although a girl
'ated by one OF them might oe taken Tor a.
buoy, aud SO pass by unnoticed
Where was The fir p said lady to her
male companlon, who had rushed out of the
TitnsViIie OJera House The other niphr, the
moment The cnriain fell on The first set of
VIC ims. II was a false alarm, said he
chewing fee and cloves vigorously.
OIe Of the saddest sights in this season Of
the year l. young man who has waited our
side the church ot an evening unil he Is chill
ed through. only to see bis girl walk IF with
some rascal who has been inside all the time
tcasiing his sinful shins at he stove.
ID tioitions mot according to the dictionary.
-D-putarlon: A noun of multitude, which
means many. bat does not signify much Mar
nag: Harness for psir. Mu ,iciau: A man
who plays WHEN he works and works when he
plays. Water A clear flu d ouce used as a
drink.
Western papers speaks of the house. clean
log season as that time when divine woman
has her own Way at the house. while the old
man takes bis solemn Tepast from the rop of
the Hour barrel, aud in sleeping eri rvs the in
terval between the bed room and the front
fence. 1t is season of meditation, whitewash,
and calo, uulmpassioued profanity"
A Gallowstown lady recently requested her
husband to go 10 the dressmaker and tell her
that she This wlfe) had changed her mind, and
would have the watered silk made no Instead
ct the popiin, and that IF she thinks it would
look better with bias fiounces wi bout ruff ag.
and boz plated below the equator, which should
n nhod
d Wn the seams, with Russet stitch be- weeu.
she can make it up hat way, instead of futing
the oobloet Insertion aud piecng out with
point applique, as L suggested yesterday. -
Inc man Is now raving maniac
A recently employed local editor on an Indi
enapoils paper was annoyed by seedy luokipe
1eiiG" VINO sat by the stove one cold night last
week to warm himself See here. old fell
low" said he, 6aaIly, hadn't you better 90
home Z, The ''old fellow glared at him, bur
said nothing. After few minutes the editor
took the old fellow by the shoulders to lead him
out, remsrklpg that it was no place for ioafers
Bee here, young man, reared the old fellow,
you evidently don know who you re talking
to- My name is Smith, and | am one of the
proprletors OF this paper The a,tounded
eoltor plunged headioDg into eimlet hole.
A CURIOUS KINDOF ZEBRA. menageria-
man who bought bra tr,m an iodiyidu.I
who said that be had just arrived from Africa
With the animal, kept his purchase closely CON
n1ed In Its cage Ter several weeks unul he
thought washing would do it good. Then he
LED lt down to the creek, and gave it coed
scruobiOg for half an hour. At TIE end OF thar
tltne me menagerie-man was surprised TO per- |
ceIve that the Ze' "a stripes had entirely dis |
appeartd Ard now, if any body wishes 10 bnv |
an sDe- bodied aud energetic mule, warranted |
to be kind IN single harness aud not 10 suffer |
from home sickness because it can't get back |
TO Africa, such an article can be prcc ired of a |
meDagerle- person no Is dseused with zebras
A good story Is told of tall, raw boned fell.
low. who went into market house In B ,ston-
perhaps the Quincy-and seeing large neg on
e1hloitinn' was nightly struck with il, II
swear, said he, that's a great hop I .we.,
l never finer 10, XII, g one in inv liza
swear, what short legs he's got. | swear
'Lo here, friend, " said little, drv Inuki,p
Individual, from up, you must not swear
30 L swear, should like to know wh,2'
sald the hard swearer, with an omlnous look
ID cause SAID the iIftie man. swearing il a
gainst he law, aud shall have TO C u,uit ,ou"
drawing himself up. Are you a ,,t,c. ~ ,bs
peace Hquir the sweater. II am
well, | ewea 4ad the profane one II
am more astOnlshed &C that than [ wa, anon,
the hog.
TOBACCO AND SWINE.-A writer in Our
Mo"thLy for September tells story of two Well
known Southern cleigymen, one of whom un-
oeft0ok to rebnke the other for using he weed !:
Brother 4, ne exclaimed, without stop
pug W ASK any other question, lis it possible
that you chew tobacco?'
:. l must confess | do" the other onietlv re-