davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
THE CHICAGO FIRE MoNUMENT.

Chicago is building fire monument" 1t
is an article of faith with every true Chicagoan
that by the end of another year all traces of
the great conflagration of 1871 will have been
obliterated. AT any rate the city is to be built
up again soon, and though they may not for
get the experience of the days of fire them
selves, these irrepressble people are afraid
that their immediate descendants will know
very little about it. So they have gone four
, miles out of the city to their Central Park,
space of 175 acres, which is to be in time
the finest of their pleasure grounds, and there
begun the erection of monument to COM
memorate the terrible event of last year.
They propose to build it of the material which
was all the fire left of their possessions-the
salamander safes that did not melt or succumb
to the heat. These, with some other relics,
are to be worked up into monument 125 feet
high, and at its base are to be placed marble
tablets bearing the names of cities which sent
relief to Chicago after the fire, the amounts
given, and a record of other events connected
with the destruction and relief of the city
which it is thought desirable to perpetuate.
The shaft of the monument is to be composed
wholly of safes contributed by Chicago mer-
chants, and is to be suImounted by female
figure holding aloft in both hands flaming
torch emblematic Of the destruction of the
city by fire. The foundation was laid with
interesting ceremonies, in which Robert Coll
yer and the Mayor participated, and there was
an address telling he story of the conflagra-
ton over again and calling the attention of
''children's children y it, 1t seems highly
proper and appropriate memorial to erect, only
we wonder they did not build it on the site of
Mrs. o. Leary,s stable.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

sB- An honest, thrifty, well-to-do German
in Connecticut town applied to wealthy
landlord who rents great many houses. "The
house is to let, certainly said the owner,
"and if, upon inquiry, find you to be re-
sponsble and q suitable man for a tenant you
shall have it," 'sVera goot, Mr. h, you
makes just,as many questions as you mind |
takes the house when you gets ready" Two
days afterwards the house owner called upon
the German. "Well," he said, "I've in
quired pretty generally respecting your char
aoter and means, and as everybody speaks OF
you as an honest man of abundant property,
you can have the house," "Vell, den" said
Hans, 81 take dc house. And | wants to tell
you I've asked all about you among do peo-
PIES and dey say that you is dc meanest land
lord in the town; but | takes dc house all de
same.'
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

WHY Is IT?-Why is it, that when ladies
call to see a friend for friendly chat, that
they cannot finish their gossip while in DOORS
and not stand on the pavement or stoops for
many minutes after leaving the parlor, to con-
tinue the conversation? The practice is an
abominable one, especially in cold weather
A lady makes call in full dress, of course
furs, gloves and hat on, the two former of
which she removes when she enters the parlor,
and puts on when she leaves. Thus attired,
it is not so probable she will take cold, while
standing at the door, as the lady of the house,
who kept in an open entry through which a
cold current Of air rushes, is soon affected In
just this manner many woman's health is
ruined; neuralgia, rheumatism, aches, pains
and other ills following such indiscretion. II
would be well for ladies and all others, when
making call, to do their gossiping in doors
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19


How MANY THERE ARE OF Us.--It has
been calculated that the human race now COM
prises in round numbers, 1,000, 900, 900 persons,
speaking 1904 languages, protesting 1,100
forms of religion. The average duration of
human life is estimated at 3S years and six
months. A quarter of the number of children
born die before their seventh year, and one
half before their seventeenth. Out of the
1000, 600, 600 persons living, 330,000,000 die
each year, $1,000 each day, 1880 each hour
go each minute, and consequently one every
second. These 30,000000 deaths are coun-
terbalanced by 412,500,0OO births, the excess
being the annual increase of the human race
1t has been remarked that births and deaths
occur more frequently in the night than in
the day.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
ITEMS FoR TIE LADIES.

To PURIFY GLASS VEssELs.--Rinse with
powdered charcoal and pure water.
CLEANING WALL PAPER.-A damp wooden
cloth dipped in dry Indian meal, rubbed on
the wall will remove the dust and coal oil
smoke.
To CLEAN MARBLE.-Take a solution of
Gum Arabic and smear over the marble let
it remain till it dries, when it can be washed
off and the CRIME and dirt with it.
To MAKE TAFFY.-Pour half pint of water
on two quarts Of sugar, add piece of butter
size of an egg. Be careful not to stir while
boiling when done pour in pan well creased.
To Remove INK STAINs.-Put the stained
fabric over warm fiat-iron, stretch it well,
then pour in some lemon juice, and wash at
once in cold water, and the ink spots will dis
appear.
INDIAN CAKES WITHOUT MILK OR Eees.-
Take two quarts of Indian meal and table,
spoonful of lard or skimmings of fat fresh
beef, add salt and pour boiling water over and
stir well. Let it cool and mix in some wheat
flour before it is spread ON the griddle.
To REMOVE MILDEw FROM LINEN.-Pour
quart of boiling water on two ounces of chic
ride of lime, then add three quarts of cold
water, and steep the linen twelve hours or
more. This is better than the chalk and
buttermilk receipts SO often used.
REMEDY FOR SoALDs AND BuRNs.-Apply
cold water to the injured part, then cover the
wound with wheat flour to exclude the air.
In ordinary cases by this application the pain
will cease. the flour will gradually scale off and
the patient will get well without much trouble
INDIAN CAKES WITHOUT EGGs.-Poura pint
of cold sweet milk over quart of Indian meal
stir well and let it stand twelve hours before
baking. To complete the batter add another
pint of milk, some salt and small teaspoon of
soda. Then add wheat flour to make the pro-
per consistence for baking on the griddle.
DoUGHNuTs FOR CHRIsTMAs.-Beat three
eggs with two pounds Of sugar, then pour on a
quart of boiling milk and half pound of melt
ed butter when nearly cold stir in teacup
of yeast, teaspoon of salt grated nutmeg and
mace, and then add flour enough to make a
stiff batter, let it rise till it is quite light knead
in more -four to make a soft dough, and then
let it rise again, roll it out and fry in hot fat
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

TOBACCO AND SwINE.--A writer i'll Our
Monthly, for September, tells a story of two
we'll known Southern clergymen, one of whom
undertook to rebuke the other for using the
weed.
"Brother Co. he exclaimed, without stop
ping to ask any ctier question, SIS it possible
that yon chew tobacco?"
81 must confess | do" the other quietly
replied.
"Then | would quit, sir - the old gentle
man theoretically continued. at is very
unclerical practice, and must say very UNI
clearly one. Tobacco! Why, sir, even a hog
would not chew it ~
Father G., responded his amused listener,
edo you, chew tobacco"
81? No sir?" he answered, gruffiy, with
much Indignation.
"Then, pray, which is the most like the hog,
you or ~"
The old Doctors fat sides shook with laugh
ter as he said, "Wcll, | have been fairly
caught this time"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

ANSWER YOUR Boys Observation-Disclosures
ought to answer trivial questions. An inter-
rogation point symbolizes the life of childhood.
"Whyn and "What" are the keys with
which it unlocks the treasury of the world.
The boys numberlcss questions often seem
trivial, but the wise parent will never turn
them off unanswered if he can help it. 1t is
his rich opportunity of teaching. He is met
halfway, and there is all the difference between
impressing truth ON an eager mind and an
uninterested one. The little fellow, helping
you to your work, and pclting you with
endless questions, may learn as much in
week as when his boy is prisoner in the
school-room, and his thoughts are out Of
DOORS
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
JOHNNY BAnrHoLomEw,s DASH.

The passage of the train from Reno, yester-
day morning, through the burning tunnel, the
other side of the American Flat, win have to
stand on record as one Of the most brilliant,
as well as fortunate, dashes ever made under
such circumstances. Johnny Bartholomew,
one of the best engineers that ever mounted a
locomotive, had, on this particular occasion,
happened to change off with Charley McCor-
mick, the regular engineer of the "Reno"
and therefore was the hero of this occasion.
There was no trusty watchman, or anybody
else to give warning of the impending danger,
and the train was around the curve and into
the Tunnel before the fire could be seen. The
tunnel is $50 feet in length, and the fire being
at the opposite end, there was little time for
thinking or acting, and not enough for stop
ping. The deep red, roaring flames and dense
black smoke were ahead, and it looked like at
tempting mad rush through Tophet, but
there was no other way for it. The lives of
the passengers and all hands were in the care
of Johnny Bartholomew, and nobody knew it
better than he. His first impulse was to re-
verse the engine and whistle down brakes ;
but his quick conclusion was that that wouldn t
do, so with a resolute jerk of the lever he
'.threw her wide open.' The Reno gave an
angry snort, and rushed madly forward like a
freed racer, with whirlwind speed, right
through the fiery mass. Johnny held fast to
the lever, closed one eye held his breath and
tried to think of some prayer as he passed in
his checks for he imagined he could feel the
hot rails bending like lead under the wheels
and both felt and heard the blazing tmbers
and other fallen Instructions on the track be-
ing dashed aside by the trusty cow-catcher
The women passengers screamed, and even
the stoutest-hearted men quivered with sud-
den fear as they dashed through the fierce
hot light but i'll another instant the terrible
gauntlet was passed, and they safely slowed
down in the COOL gray morning daylight be-
yond. Dirt, stones and blazing bits of timber
on the cow-catcher, and the shower of burning
Goals covering the train showed how danger
GUS were the instructions SO safely passed, yet
they had rushed through SO quickly that the
paint on the passenger coaches was not even
scorched. Johnny cannot rush an engine
through the tunnel to-day, for every timber
throughout its entire length burned out as
clean as a shot gun, and huge cavings of earth
and rock render it impossible for many days
to come.-Gotd HUI {Neo.) Ne,os, Oct IS.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

aB- st. Augustine, Florida is the quaintest
as well as the oldest town in America. 1t has
it's old-tme city and gateway, after the man
ner of the cities of the Middle Ages It's
streets are very narrow, many of them being
only ten feet in width, while the widest are
not twice that. As if to make them appear
still narrower, the second stories of nearly all
the houses project over the thoroughfares ;
leaving little narrow chinks between for the
entrance of the sunlight. The appearance of
the place is quiet and sleepy, it's atmosphere
and surroundings are those of long past
age and the tourist remembers it only as an
unreal dream. Its business amounts to moth
ing. Its pride is i'll the past. Its houses
seem to be slowly going to decay, and alto
gether day or week spent in st. Augustine
leaves the traveller the feeling that he has been
in another and older world than this.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

~ There was law in Athens which sub
jectcd every citizen to punishment who refused
to take sides in the political parties dividing
the republic and in every election he was re-
quired to cast his vote in favor of one candi-
date or the other. This principle was founded
on the deepest wisdom, and for long period
was prolific of the best results to the common
and with it's adjustment there came immedi-
ately marked degeneracy among the Atheni-
an magistrates.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

TOUCHING INCIDENTAL Rochester, where
the horse disease has made such sad ravages,
a touching incident took place in one of the
firc-engine houses The last one Of the two
dying. Suddenly the bell toled out an alarm
of fire. True to old impulses, the dying steed
endeavorcd to regain his feet, and actually
did raise himself on his fore legs, only to fall
helpless Immediately. Death closed the faith
ful animals eyes an hour and quarter after
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

LEGISLATIVE SToRIEs.-One of our Legis-
latures has won a distinction during the last
winter sessions for an average of intellectual
weakness which will render it memorable for
many years to come. 81 rise for information"
said one of the dulest of the members 81
am very glad to hear it, " said one, who was
leaning over the bar, "no man wants more
than yourself" Another member arose to
speak on the bill to abolish capital punish
ment, and commenced by saying: "Mr.
Speaker, the generality of mankind in general
arc disposed to exercise oppression on the
generality of mankind in general" g You
had better stop" said one, who was sitting
near enough topull him by the coat-tail "you
had better stop; you are coming out of the
same hole you went in at"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
POETRY
LEAF FAIL.

Fall-let them fall around;
FALL on the reddening ground;
FALL as we fall away from life's sere tree
Into the ocean of eternity
Lost swallowed up, and drowned.
Fall, though the sun is high,
And bright and blue the sky;
Yet every soughing wind its Myriads sends,
Falling, still falling as false-hearted friends
In our adversely
Yet while they fall still fall,
BONNER light than all,
A bluer sheen than yon autumnai sky,
Shines on me- as feel thy love-lit eye
Dispel my beings thrall.
We walk, those leaves above,
Thy soft voice, like the dove,
Low murmuring; as when, the woods among
On morn of Valentine, the wid-bird's song
Whispers her mate of love.
So let them fall away,
Friends of the Summer day
False friends, who cannot bear afiietion's test,
know the love that liveth in thy breast
Will never fall away.
Never! not even when
Beyond earth's narrow ken,
Like dead leaves futterng in the Autumn tide,
We two have passed, our love shall still abide,
Shall have grown perfect then
-Tinsey's Magazine.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
Il GREELEY EDITOR'S DRE4M-1 LONG
PROCESSION.

The overwhelming defeat of the Greeley
party is taken philosophically by.some of the
Greeley editors, very sadly by others, and
good-naturedly by many. The editor of the
La Crosse Democrat thus describes his expert
ences the evening after eection:
About 12 o'clock last night solitary horse
man might have been seen gently meandering
up Main street mounted on pair of fiery,
untamed calf-skin boots. The solitary horse
man turned up Sixth street, and soon entered
his domicile, where the following conversation
ensued:
Wife," Is Greeley elected?"
Solitary Horseman-" No."
Wife-"Is Woodward elected?"
s. H.-"No."
Wife-"Is Dan elected?"
S. H." Doubtful |"
Wife" Well, you had better go to bed.''
The solitary horseman alluded to in this
touching dialogue was the writer of this ar
ticle. We took that advice and retired, and
soon Morpheus took tbs i'll his arms, and we
dreamed that we were Frear-stone sidewalk,
and that the whole Grant party of the United
States were walking over us from head to foot,
in single file, with spike shoes on. They were
longer time passing given point than any
Grant procession we ever saw, but they all
got over at last, though it took them nearly
all night They are heavy steppers, and we
know some of them were drunk, they waddled
around SO.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

now TO PREYENT FRI s.

The fate Of Chicago and Boston admonishes
us to be very careful in the matter of fires;
and with that object in view, we submit the
following suggestions for the consideration Of
our readers:
Keep matches in metal boxes and out Of the
reach Of children.
Wax matches are particularly dangerous,
and should be kept out Of the way Of rats ami
mice.
Fill fluid or camphene lamps only by day
light, and never near a FIRE or light.
Do not deposit coal or wood ashes in a
wooden vessel, and be sure burning cinders'
are extinguished before depositing.
Never place light or ashes under a stair
case.
or gas pipes in a building.
Be careful never to place gas or other lights
near curtains.
Never take light into a closet.
Do not read in bed by candle OF lamp
light.
Place glass shades over gas lights in show
windows, and do not crowd goods near them.
No smoking should be permitted in ware
houses, particularly where goods are stacked
or cotton stored.
Where furnaces are used the principal regis
ter should be fastened open.
Stove-pipes should be at least four inches
from board work and guarded by tin.
All hatchways or openings in the floors of
stores, factories or warehouses shouldbe closed
at night.
All iron doors between stores should be
closed at night or when not i'll use.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

A WORD From MIR. BEEcHER-A VICTIM
OF FALsEHooD.-A man cut from paper a
precious lie about Henry Ward Beecher drink
ing whiskey, and sent it to him with his re-
grets, &c. This was the answer:
my DEAR BROTHER You are world
too anxious. Facts live. But lies do not,
when facts are against them, and have fair
chance.
"Do you remember how many just such
stories were told about my father? Among
others the famous one of the Doctors : lie? ?
/ have had more lies told about me every year
of my public life than would shingle cathe-
dral. Yet have contrived to live and have
a firm faith that | shall continue to liye-till
die.
$50 pray do not lie awake about me, but
laugh five times when you sigh once.
every truly yours, ii. w. BEEcHER."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

> rB- All reformers declare, that the great
object Of modern civilization, especially in a
free county, is to elevate the minds and i'm
prove the morals of the people--to cultivate
and enrich the intellectual faculties in order
that they may be directed to the proper con-
troll of the passions, whose natural tendency
reason, and a just perception of our true in
terest
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

A CUSTOM OF THE SCOOP OLD TIMEs.'--
1t is pleasant in any event to be assured that
we are as good deal better as well as wiser
than our ancestors. Hank to what used to be
the fashion, according to Mr.. Herbert Spencer
in the Contemporary Reoieao::
lie describes the time when men took drugs
to increase their desire for wine when glasses
were SO shaped that they had to be held until
emptied when man was reckoned as "two-
bottled man. third-bottled man." &c.
and when (Mr. Spencer might have added) one
of the first of Scottish mobiles employed do
mestic whose sole duty it was to sit under the
table and loosen the neck-cloths of the guests
as they fell from their chairs in order that
they might not sufTocate in their drunken
Sleep Imagine such a state of affairs at a
Philadelphia dinner-party. Intoxication used
to be mark of honor. 1t is now disgrace.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

rB- A few Sundays since teacher in
Sunday school in Chicago, said to one Of her
pupils:
James, what good thing-what great plea
sure arc you willing to give up, as a sacrifice
during Lenten season."
Jimmy meditated about ten seconds, and re-
sponded:
81 think I'll give mp going to Sunday
school,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
wAsN,T CERTAIN.

Not a bad story is told at the expense of
one of our most distinguished and estimable
citizens. 1t seems that a dinner party was in
northern lights, and this gentleman stopping
out to cool his burning brow, was startled BY
the display about the frosty pole. He stood
perfectly amazed then turning to the window
he saw within the wife Of his bosom sitting
with the ladies' waiting for their liege lords
to end their champagne and segars. Pushing
aside the curtains, he beckoned Mrs. Agnes
to come out. She complied, when he
said to her, solemnly
"Wagness, der see anything extronery
now?n =
Eyes, Dolly--I see that you have been
drinking too much wine.'
''No not that, Wagnes. Imean extronory
phomomonums in atmosphere"
"Why, where, Dolly"
upper yonder, Wagnes.
Why, dear me Yes, do, indeed-the
most beautiful aurora that ever saw |"
"Wagnes, are things shootin' ?"
eyes, DEAR
"And a flashin', Wagncse"
eyes, Dolly"
cam a sorter spreadin' and dancin' --eh,
Wagnes?"
''All that, my DEAR
'4Io no !" laughed the husband much
relieved. "Do you know, Wagnes-I mean
Agnes-when came out and saw the CELESTIAL
phomomonums a-glowin' upper yonder, hang
me effer didn't think was drunk"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

eY- Sir Walter Scott, in lending book
trlal in returning it, "This is really neces-
sary," said the poet in apology "for tho
many Of my friends arc bad "a ishmeticians
observe almost all of them to be good book
keepers.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19
TO MOTHERS.

Mothers daylight now is fading,
Call the children in;
This is now your precious seed-time,
Now the work begin.
Light the lamps, let home be brighter
Let all glow with love-
Make your home another Eden,
Like the world above.
Streets are dark, and Satan's net
Is set for youthful feet;
Then gather all the children dear
From oil the busy street.
Silently, the seeds you scatter
One by one will fall
One by one will spring and gladden.
Hearts, and home, and all.
Oh then, may this precious seed-time
All your thoughts engage;
You will reap golden harvest,
Blessings in old age.
-Edston Daily Erpres
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

ADVERTISEMENT (FREE) .-Strayed, lost or
stolen, from the premises of the editor and
principal proprietor of the Tribune, some
time between the months of April and No
vember, a very large and fine Tidal Wave.
Anybody giving notice of its whereabouts
will receive the humble thanks of the proprie-
tor aforesaid, who is in too reduced circum-
stances to offer any more substantial reward
-Neao York Times.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

GB- 1t is said by travellers that as you re-
cede from the cattle markets at Baltimore,
Philadelphia and New York, toward the
embarrassing countries, the beef becomes pro-
portionately tough, until when you get to
Texas, nothing can be procured in the way of
stsak but gristle. This is the hard basis of
prosperity, practicing self-denial, by sending
the best one has to market and retaining the
inferior for home consumption.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1872-11-19

eB When the lamented ARENAS Ward
exhibited his wax works in Utah, he relates
that he was accosted by venerable and vine
garish virgin, who inquired, "Can't go in
without paying?" "No, but you can pay
without going in"