New-York tribune., 1872-02-01
SpRINGES TO CATCH WOODCOCKS.

David once SAID III his haste tnat al men
" were liars" and it has been considered an
excellent Jest ever since to say that he might
say it now at his leisure. But David was,
after all. right in reCanting his rash utterance
If all men were liars, lying would cease to be
pro(itablo. II is the favorable conjunction of
the rogue and the honest man which gives to
villainy its temptation and It's opportunity.
Mr. Carlyle was perhaps nearer the truth
when he said of his own country that 1t num-
bcred forty millions of inhabitants, mostly
fools. The ease with which the most gross
and vulgar forms of knavery flourish i'll in
telligent communities IL n strong argument
in favor of the theory of the great cynic.
A dozen times we have exposed one of the
most imbccile swindles of NewYork, the so
called "New-YOrk and Hartford Publishing
" Company They have come to us and
begged of us to desist, saying we were rum
ing them and their business. Yet the only
effect of the fullest publicity is to embarrass
their operations for week or two, by which
time the public has forgotten all about it, and
the old rascality comes out again to its work.
1t must be confessed that this particular
knaveIy has a firm and enduring foundation
I'm the vanity of men. Any enterprise which
can successfully appeal to this master passion
is sure of easy gains. provincial banker, q
member of the WashOe Legislature, a new
fedged Doctor of Divinity from some sweet
water Seminary, a brevet Brigadicr of 1865
comes to the city and goes to his accustomed
tavern. He feels little lost and strange in the
hustle and whirl of this vast metropolis. He is
wounded and dazzled by a glare OF life that
makes his own importance and achievements
seem small affair But during the first day
Of his sOjourn he finds this mysterious note
in his room, with IN imposing display head
ing:
DEAR SIR wou!d you bc good enough to call at our
n Y Office at your earliest pOstbLc convenience. We
wish 10 you on matter OF Importance which can
only DO fully explained in personal interview 1t Is
almost impossible to find guest at his hotel unless By
appointment is our appOiogy for not calling again.
Yours very respectfully n Y AND Hartford PUBLISH
ING Co, Opposite City Hall and Astor HouseJ per
DUNCAN
After reading this impressive note he feels
less fOrlOrn. lie hurres down to Park-row
and finds an affable person who is delighted
to see him, who has long known and adj
mired him at distance, who blesses the hour
that has given him this unexpected honor.
The village Hampden is delighted, and begins
to think the world il not 80 unapprecative as
it seemed. This opinion is fortified when the
Publishing Company gently and timidly
breaches the purpose of the interview he has
demanded. He wants to take the Life of the
obscure celebrity; he is about to publish o
Record of the Men of Progress of the Century;
such work would be shamefully incom-
plete without the history of the village
Hampton. Sometimes saving common sense
steps in and carries the rural hero out of the
office, but often he listens, and weakens, and
signs contract to furnish biography and
take a large number of copies of the work
when it is finished. He is then asked for q
slight advance on account, "tO push the work
"Of engraving" and he often gives this, and
then he goes away prouder, poorer, but not
much wiser man. He finds out after while how
ne has been handled, how his waxen nose has
been nodded at the mercy of his ungrammat-
ical admirer, and he feels too much disgusted
TO talk about it. He is sure that all his friends
will laugh at him for his folly. He can make
no "pOsible apology" for his own fatuty.
He puts the investment to profit and loss, and
the N. Y. e. H. Pub. Co., per Duncan, go on
their way, ravaging the hotels, and taking
every day their half dozen young and tender
celebrities to their ogre's castle in the soltudes
of Park row. The fate of such is dreadful
warning TO all who neglect punctual reading
Of their TRIBUNE.