Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1872-03-07
Kentucky Jokes.

1t was during the presidential cam
paign which resulted in the election OF
Buchanan. that the writer of the ap-
pended sketch, IN company with three
other politicians, rode from Paducah
70 Boston, Ky, in hack They were
bound for one of the old-fsshioned
harbecucs, and he tells what happened
on the way thus: The joking Judge
NJ. was one Of the party, and the bot
ties that peeped out from the basket
under the seat seemed to improve the
sparkle of his wit. the flavor of his
jokes and the music of his laugh, until
the happy contagion even reached the
driver. Our fun was Mt its highest
when. turning "A curve in the road. we
saw. down its hot. dusty stretch. a
solitary oX-cart, with its owner perched
upon what proved to be bags of corn.
As a kind Of advance guard. agreat,
ugly, brindle dog came trotting along
IN advance, and attracted hy oar noise,
he threw himself in an attitude of de-
iiance. determined to dispute our adj
vance With his savage growl, red
eyes aud erect bristles. he indeed pre-
scnted a formidable appearance.
Judge NJ. could not let such au oppor-
tunlty for practlca joke pass. Said
he: "lll bet the drinks for the dav
that | can run that dog of the road"
Done, sad we. Stopping our hack.
he got out, aud threw the skirt, of his
"swallow-tallcd' coat over his shout
ders, stack his old slouch hat on the
back of his head, aud going down on
all fours," he scampered toward the
dog with the most trightful yell, re-
mlnding one of the fable of the ass in
a lions skin. This was too much Tor
the dog, and. hcwling with fright. lie
took to the BUSH The oxen also saw
tine trIghttu, monster coming down the
road and with one wild below they
took To the brush, with their tail,
standing straight out behind. Away
they went, with wheels bouncing in the
air, bags of corn bursting open, and
splliing their contents IN continuous
drill. Whoa, Blaze. Whoa, Bail o,
Lor'iv . what shall do" came from
the frightened man on the cart, As he
was bounding from side To side, now
graphing cart pole, then catching at
"A bag OF corn rs 1t went over the side
Inns Kind Of performance couldn't last
long without IA change for better or
worse, 50 the oxen went tearing down
the steep bank of little creek, aud
overturned every thing IN the water,
About waist deep. One OK, getting
loose, went up the opposite bank and
soon disappeared, while the other
covered down, pitcously hellowin. as
We came up 10 the scene of disaster.
There stood the poor man ia water to
his waist, his wagon overturned, and
half his corn soaking in the water.
while the other half was scattered in
the woods. lie looked scared anu
pltltul, and said: 20. Lordy, stranger
don't never Ito that ar any more, I'm
ruined - 1t was splendid success,
that joke, and there stood the
Judge, holding on 10 sapling and
laughing till the tears ran down his
cheeks. We took up 4 subscription
for the poor fellow The Judge head
Ell the list with an amount nearly
covering the damages, and we added
10 1t until We left the man IN thankful
ness that he had sold his corn 50 we'll.
A, the barbecue the Judge bet all his
money on a little horseracc, and lost
and from that, and from the effects OF
his drinks at our expense, we had to
carry hlIn 10 our hack on a barn door.
On hI. way home he insisted upon
standing on bis head. Which was the
ruined man Toledo Blade.