Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1872-08-12
MISCELLANEOUS.

Cholera is raging in Russia.
Mrs. Fair looks worn and faded.
Iron shingles are being manufactured.
Florida's grasshoppers are as large as
sparrows, says an exchange.
Lake Superior is fast taking rank as
a superior watering-place.
An impartial Kansas patriot has nam
ed his twins Grant and Greeley.
A desirable secondhand article-A
young, rich and amiable widow.
A large colony of Johnny Bulls are
en- route to Minnesota.
Great secrecy is enforced by the Gen
eva Board of Arbitration
Charleston has shipped $4,000 water,
melons to New York City.
Richmond on the Jeems is building
home for Magdalenes.
There was lately rain of bones in
Carol Parish, Louisiana.
New York City is to have an UNDER
ground railroad within two years.
A Greenfield Indianian has been fired
trihe for whaling his grand pa.
A colored preacher in Wapsie, Iowa,
lately ran off with half dozen of the
sisters.
Josh Billings says, deliver him from
a wife that don't love him, and from
children that don't look like him.
1t is said that the balcony of the Cat
skill Mountain House commands view
Of about 10000 square miles.
A Kansas paper tells of an army of
toads which extends three fourths of a
mile along a road.
HopEFUL.-It is a meteorological fact
that when rain falls it will rise again in
dew time
Eight dollars per day entities board
er to the privileges of Saratoga hash
cry.
By the late floods it is estimated that
the losses to Alabama will foot up five
millions.
The celebrated Irish band has split,
some of them declining to go back tc
ould Ireland.
A young Georgian committed suicide
on finding his hotel bill more than he
could pay.
The latest Memphis sensation is a
somnambulist OF ghost who jumps from
roof to roof.
Murders, rapes, and all species Of
blood-freezing crimes seem to hold riot
in every direction.
A lady in Indiana has been granted 9
divorce on plea that her husband woulo
not assist her on washing days.
1t is believed that the attempted as
sassination of King Amadeus of Spain
was participated in by the same parties
that assassinated Gen. Prim. n 4
A Connecticut widow bowed dowr
with grief, telegraphed to her friends
, "My dear husband is dead Loss full,
covered by insurance"
The following congratulatory telegram
! was lately received by wedding pair
Congratulations on your nuptials. Ma,
your future troubles be only little ones.
A Cincinnati butcher tied up hi
daughter by the hands, so that her toe
just touched the ground, and thel
: smeared her feet with molasses to at
tract the flies.
Two sisters have eloped from Berlin
Prussia, with young man whom the,
are both in love with and whom the
,, both intend to marry when they reacl
Salt Lake, which is their destination
A husband pleaded to libel for di
vorce on account of cruelty and neglect
that bis wife, the libelant, spoke harshl
to him and threw pillows at him, whic
s. resulted in dyspepsia. Divorce granted
:, The Navajo girls of Arizona are tn
;, nearest the world affords to the sher
: herdesses of poetry. These dusk
nymphs watch the focks and work 0
aboriginal distaffs while doing it.
A young man rode ten miles in raj
road carriage with young lady, wit
i" the intention of popping the question
but all he said was, at is quite income
tonight" "Yes," she replied, muchly.
g And there wasn't another word said.
A cravan county (Ga.) sow had fol-
pigs, one like horse, one like an opo
to sum, the third like child, and IL
fourth like a pig. The owner of IL
SOW believes this to be witcbcraft AT
= had all of them burned to death.
Lone Pine, California, has marie
pair, the male of which is half cent
ry old, and the female barely twel
years. They have been married thr
years and the wife still wears she
dresses and plays with dolls.
No matter what kind of a busine
i. you are in, if you live within ten mil
of Barton, advertise in the MoNITo
1t is just as impossible for man to G
very rich without advertising as it
'nS nS for cross-eyed man to shoot straig
IDS with a borrowed gun.
There is man ninety -one years G
in Detroit, who obstinately refuses
to make himself useful to itemizers
He won't play base ball, nor chop t
cords of wood per day, nor tell 10
stories about things that he has ney
eaten, nor get up at 3 o'clock, nor P
. tend that he never rode in railro
If car. He is strictly uninteresting.