Connecticut western news., 1872-08-23

Copper. .toed fans are sold for the benefit of young ladies who have no one to love, and who chew the stuff1ng out of any other kind in one evening when hop is in pro gross.
 "Albany has four hundred dwelling houses, and about two thousand four hun dred inhabitants, all standing with their gable-ends to the streets" So it was print ed in school geography not long ago.
 The St. Louis Globe says: In the vicinity of Lexington Tn this state, there are terrible scenes of suffering. The hens lay boiled eggs, the girls wear blisters on their noses, the goose ponds boil and bubble, and beef steaks laid on picket fence cook in two minutes.
 If you hand lady @ newspaper with a scrap cut out of it, not line of it will be read, but every bit of interest the paper possesses is centered in finding out what the missing scrap contained.
 An Ohio baggage smssher was knocked down by lightning the other day, but never let go of the trunk he was operating upon, and on coming to his senses proceeded with the work of destruction.
 Nashville Thomas cats have added piano playing to their other musical accomplish ments, and can howl an operatic air and claw an accompaniment equal to any board- ing school graduate.
 At Matthn, Ill., there is pie woman who retsils begged, sewed or machinestica- ted pies, the size of an elephants foot, for the sum of two nickles each. Those who think the country is not prosperous under the present administration will do well to note the fact.
 The distillery in Terre Haute shut dowr the ether 6ay for repairs. It will be closed ten days, and this, together with the fact that Barnum's show has gone, has cast 6 gloom over the community that lager beer and soda water cannot dispel.
 Davenport bar-keepers are much excited over longlegged customer who walks quietly in, calls for Cred eye" straight drinks it then knocks the bar keeper dowI and flies like deer for some other saloon where he repeats his peculiar patronage.
 Joaquin Miller is to lecture Tn New Eng land next fall. By way of an advertise ment he has deserted and been divorced from his wife, has got engaged to Scotcl
 peeress, and wears shirt with pink boa
 constrictors writhing on green ground
 Chicago Post.
 Aha the centenarian hero of Waterloo the shower of toads, the sea serpent, tn ] young lady with Hazard in her stomach : the mastodon's jaw hone, the ancient ne gress that nursed the Father of his Country the calf with two heads, and the lady tha l makes aneedle-book of herself, becomin , somewhat stale, the vigorous old woman o : eighty five, who does all the work on large farm with her own hands, and suI
 ports 8 numerous family of great grand
 children, has started on the rounds sgaln She is sojourning just now in Brown Co., Ind.
 fl An editor relates how @ colored barbe
 made 8 dead-head of him. He offered th t usual dime for shaving, when the fello1 drew himself up with considerable pompoi
 ity, and said:
 I understand dat you is an editor , Well, what of it ? says we. We neber charge editors nufan.' But, my woolly headed friend,' we COT 8 tinued, there's good many editors trave . ing now-a-days, and such liberality on you j. part would prove 8 ruinous business Oh! never mind, remarked the barber
 we make 1t up of de gemmen.'