The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1872-09-19
HUMOROUS.

The HAIRY CHAP THAT STOLE JE
RUsHA JANE.-It was many winters
since fell in love with Jane Jerushs
Skeggs, the handsomest country
girl, by far, that ever went on legs
BY meadow creek, wood and dell SO
often did we walk, and the moon
light smiled on her melting lips,
and the night winds learned our
talk. Jane Jerusha was all to me,
for my heart was young and true,
and loved with a double and twist
ed love, and love that was honest
too. roamed all over the neIgh.
bors's farm, and ] robbed the wild
wood bowers, and tore my trowsers
and scratched my hands in search
of the choicest flowers. In my JOY
GUS love I brought Oh, Sc to my Je-
rusha Jane; but wouldn't be 50
foolish now. il l were a boy again.
A city ehSp then came along, all
dressed up in fine clothes. with a
shiny hat and a shiny vest, and a
moustache under his nose. He
talked to her of singing schools
for her father owned a farm J, and
she left me, the country love, and
took the new chaps arm. And all
night never slept, nor could / eat
next day, for / loved that girl with
fervent love that naught could
drive away. / strove to win her
back to me, but it was all in vain ;
the city chap with the hairy lip
married Jerusha Jane. And my
poor heart was sick and sore until
the thought struck me, that Just as
good fish remained as ever was
caught in the sea. So I went to
the Methodist church one night,
and saw a dark brown curl peep
ing from under a GYPSY hat, and l
married that very girl. And many
years have past and gone, and l
think my loss my gain; and !
often bless that hairy chap that
stole my Jerusha Jane.
THE TURKLE.-At the last school
exhibition of a town in Maine the
following essay received the prize /:
On the Turkle. This animal is
most always found in the water and
then he comes on dry land. The
turkle cannot fly. If he was the
right kind of bird he could fly; but
if he was a goose bird or an ostrich
he could not fly. The turkle has
four paws and a mouth like the
Americen eagle, which makes the
British lion and the uniform trem.
ble. The turkle has a shell, and
sometimes folks put fire on it and
the turkle cTawls out. When the
turkle craWls out of his shell he is
very wet and sticky. There are
two kinds of turkle, the mud turkle
and the other kind. We don't have
any other kind in our pond. French
and Irish people eat turklc and
frogs, but l should not like to. !
caught IA turkle once, but it did not
do me any good, for l snapped it
off for a jack-knife and cut my fin
gers. Father said it was g iudg-
ment, but I thought it was a knife.
A high officer of the sons of TEN
perance presenting hiTself with the
grOg he had been drinking, at the
door Of division" for admission,
was waited upon by an Irish senti-
mel, to whom he gave the password,
when the following passed:
Sir" said he, land We are Mister
U'Wright, the Grand Worthy Patri
arch of the State of Kaintucky, l
do be after belayin'."
YES" said Jim, "you are per
fectly right, my friend, but why do
you ask the question:
"rO tell We the truth, then, sir,
and shame the deeyil," said Pat,
''ye do be havin' the right password
for Son of Temperance, entirely;
but, by .the Holy Virgin and the
blessed Saint Patherick, ye've got
the wrong shmGllr'
A Western editor pictures a re-
porter, in new style of school
reader, thusly: "Here is the face of
a reporter. See how joyful he Looks.
He has just heard that a man has
cut his own throat, and he is going
for the item. Should sou like to be
a reporter and get licked on dark
nights and see dead persons, and |
climb up four pair Of stairsY'
An Arkansas woman lately tarred !
and feathered her husband, where
upon ne declared that if she did it
again he would quit the house for
ever.
On Tuesday last a Dubuque dam
sci, pretty as a pink, entered a sa-
Don, kicked over a table, drew a re- |
VOlver on the bar tender, and led |
her father out by the ear.
There is nothing like a Good def !
as the teacher thought when |
he explained the mesning Of "old
naid'' AZ a woman who had been /
made a very long time.