The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1866-1891, 1872-05-16
.BREVITIES.

OlVl1uo, OACSoh3 40 VII w ohS'
Memphis claims ten thousand yaller puEps
And yet she is not happy.
The reason why they beat the drum was
because it called the harp a Tyre.
Why is muff lake fool? Because it:
holds lady's hand without squeezing it.
New Jersey has sixteen thousand of acres
planted with cranberries.
You may find fashion in town, but you
meet with more stiles in the country.
Two Indianians freda salute from an old
iron tube, about twelve hours before their
funeral.
"What's in dress?" says popular writ
or. Sometimes great deal and sometlmesa
precious little.
Covington, Kentucky, has had some small
pox. Three persons died from fright and one
from the disease.
Alexis was briefly but satisfactorily intro
duced to Chicago Siskey tho other day, and
never smiled again.
What is the difference between bee-linc
and diseased potato None-as one isa bee
holder und the other speckd tatur.
Scest thou a man that is hasty in his
words? there is more hope Of a fool than of
him.
TO seek the redress of:grievances by 60
ing to'aw is like a sheep running for'shelter
to bramble bush.
When man has no design but to speak
plain truth, he may say great deal in very
narrow compass.
Franklin says: Of all our infrmities,
vanity is the dearest to us "a man will starve
his other vices to keep that alive.
A good many trades people only give fif-
teen ounces to the pound-it is bad
weigh they have.
The man whose hair turned white in q
single night is surpassed by the New York
girl who lost hers completely off in one
dance.
A San Francisco tobacconist, believing in
newspapers, gives copy of the morning or
evening edition to every customer spending
ten cents for segars or tobacco.
The premium sweet potato at the recent
Louisiana Statate Fair weighed 16 pounds,
and measured in shortest circumference 24
inhces.
No man was ever yet convinced of any
momentou truth without feel ing in himself
the poweras well as the desire of commuicat-
ing it,
Oh! the blessings of a homo where old
and young mix kindly-the young unawed,
the old unchillcd, in unreserrcd communica-
tion.
The most faithful and natural exccrise of
the mind, is conversation. We find the use
of it more sweet than of any other action Of
life.
The Boston Post thinks that Mr.. Tenny-
son, if he comes TO America, should visit
South Carolina, to see how his federation of
the world" is getting along.
(Which ofthe Fejee Islands are you from"
asked visitor of one of Barnum's cannibals
the other day. "Tippcrary, bedad," was the
reply Of the rayenous anthropophagnian.
A legislator in Missouri estimates the dog.
crop of the United States at 81 ,0O0,0 900.
Each pup, he says costs So year, making
total of $l6S, 100000. Of these $4,000
60 mad annually and bite 10000 people,
furnishing about sc, 900 items to helocalre-
porters.
Thomas" said father to his son, "don't
let the girl make fool of you. Remember
the adage, that Love is blind" "Oh, talk
about loves being blind" said Tom; "why,
see ten times as much in that girl as you
do"
A youthful novice in smoking turned
deadly pale and threw his cigar away, "Oh,
DEAR" he said, "theres some'in' in that cigar
that's maxim me sick" II know what it
is" said his companion, pulling away"
What" "Tobacker."
They have Way of cnlightening the vot-
ers in France without sending Pub. Docs.
through the mails. All tax papers are head
ed ''Occasioned by the war Of 1870, dcclar-
ed by Napoleon"
One of the lates sensation stories COM
mences with the casual remark: "Did you
ever, gentle reader, have tustle with a
fullgrown Bengal tiger2 The Chicago Post
says: 1--WE did, and if the king had turned
as we betted it would, we'd have come out
$50 ahead"
The Cowier-Journa1 says: England has
the most powerful navy in tho world, while
ours amounts to little moro than Robson
on corn. stalk raft armed with q half-inch
howitzer made of plaster of Paris. That
doesn't look like we ought to be "consequen
tial"
Mary had a little lamb, with hair as fine
as silk; the longer Mary lived, the moro she
found that lamb blk. For ell the hair
was only fax, on that dcceitful brute; but
Mary hadn't much to say, for hers was only
jute.
An Atlanta 1adv recentlv nlayf1lly tied