The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1872-07-16
Gbe Ginres, Mem Bloonrhelo, 1)a.

menus. nad tOrgOtten tnese."
As soon as the pair of chickens and the
turkey were adjusted on the spacious dish,
which the landlord already repented hav-
ing put in the incorrigible travellers way,
the latter sang out at the top of his voice
"All right, driver Go ahead p
Crack went the whip, and off rolled the
stage. leaving Boniface vexed, angry, and
and yet amused at the righteousness of
the whole scene.
AS for passenges all shra nix iustinctively
from the bread meat, ETC., which had been
so literally provided, while the ladies turn
ed up their pretty little noses, and eiacu-
lated in soft, low voice:
"Disgusting r
Hold on here stranger, will you % said
he of the chickens and turkey, "this con-
founded stage jo!ts at such rate that
can't carve my turkey" Indicating with
his fingers as he spoke, on one side of the
the spacious dish upon which reposed his
provender.
The individual thus addressed could do
no less than obey the request; and then the
same was made to his other neighbor who
lent the required aid. d..
"And now, stranger, do you hold this
bread bag " extending his clean, well-filled
handkerchief to a passenger before him.
He was, in answer to this request politely
relieved of his bread, eggs, etc.
The dish was now supported on his knees
and firmly held there by his next door
neighbor, who began to enjoy the joke, as
did most of his other fellow-passenger
In dissecting the turkey and pair of chick
ems, under all the disadvantageous circum-
stances, he showed himself skillful carver.
The different parts were nicely separated,
and laid about the dish neatly and quite
temptingly. By this time the odor of the
fowls had awakened into keenness the un-
satisfied appetites Of the whole company,
who were only waiting for an invitation to
help themselves. In carving, the accom-
plished stranger had surrounded the edge
of the dish with the pieces of turkey and
chicken leaving quite space in the centre.
Into this he emptied the contents of the
pocket handkerchief, consisting of dozen
or SO of boiled eggs, with bread.
"Now, ladies'" he said, lifting the dish
and partly turning around SO that it rested
on the taut leathern strap that formed the
movable back of the seat, and thus was
fully presented to them. Help your
selves, know you are hungry"
The ladies looked at the tempting exhi-
bition, colored and hesitated.
"Don't be afraid" he urged. "Neces-
ity knows no law"
The temptation was too great for one
hungrier than the rest who, hesitating no
longer, took the wing of chicken in one
hand and piece of bread in the other, and
forthwith commenced operations, not how
ever before she had smiled, bowed, and
said courteous "Thank you, sir"
The other two ladies followed suit quite
naturally, then the men went to work in
right good earnest, nor paused until turkey,
chicken, bread, eggs, and all had vanished.
OF course, the sauce for all this was good
humor, jokes and funny sayings in no
small quantity. After the eatables had
fully disappeared the empty dish was cast
overheard, and all hands composed them
selves, in the best temper possible, with
themselves, each other, and all the world,
Boniface not excepted.
Two hours and half afterwards the
stage brought up at Grimes for tea. For
some time past the late dinner arrange
ments had not affected the appettes of the
passengers as it had done at first, much
to the surprise of the landlord and agent,
and not little to his regret. On this oc-
casion, however, his guests seemed more
inclined to laugh than to eat, and finally
left the table, after having taken only one
cup each, with "fixings" in proportion.
The secret of this leaked out before the
stage moved, to the great merriment of
Grimes and the coterie in his bar-room, to
whom one of the passengers related the
Joke. Among these was the editor of a
country paper.
On the next morning the whole story APP
peared in print with names, places, and
all detailed with much humor. This ac-
count, Parker who most people thought
knew about as much of the whole matter
as anybody, had put into the form of a
hand BILL two or three of which were cir
culated among the passengers in every
stage. OF course Screwler became aware
of this fact, and did not venture again to
cheat the passengers out of their dinner
when they consented to eat at all. But it