Lexington weekly intelligencer. (Lexington, Mo.) 1871-1887, 1872-02-07
TRAVELLING EXPERIENCES.
4 ''Lady in Charge"-lIow to Secure
a Berth.
BY DON PIATT.

body was not put under my care.
don't know why this is;
suppose it is something in my coun
tenamce; ifl knew what, would have
it extracted. don't like having un.
protected female and school boys and
girls turned over to me. It's a little
hard on Il man. And what is tho
good of it? Nobody needs projections
if amy one does, it is Il benevolent
good-looking, inocent sort of a maj
such as the writer of this.
was leaving OH the morning train
once from Philadelphia, when a re-
spcctablc-looking old scoundrcl il
gold-riInmed glasses asked me to take
charge OF his daughter. She coulG
have taken charge of me. She wa:
thirty if Il day, with face that hac
been Oh the offensive for ten years
I'd like to see any man attack thai
woman, I'd go odds ten to one on the
scratch.
The old fellow seemed to be in :
great hurry, and, tlrusting the lad. \.
under my arm, left the cars and drove
off. In a thin angular voice, that wa.
meant to be very sweet and was not
she ashcd me to take her pocket-booE
and get the necessary ticket. l left
the car for that purpose but when
approached. the opening where til,
ticket agent, kept i'll solitary continc.
mcnt, snaps at the world outside,
l found that l had left ml
pocket-book under my pillow at the
hotel, and, what was worse, my watcl
with it. had about twenty minutes
and jumping into Il hack | promised
the driver ten dollars If he would get
to the hotel and back in time for tho
train. He started off at furious
rate, ran over All apple stand, crippled
a venerable gentleman on the corner
opposite, and in less than the time
stated and the driver found our.
selves marched off to the station il
the hands of the police. We were
taken before corpulent Justice oI
Peace, who had as much adiposc ii
his head as most men carry about
their muscles, and it took the old fel
low just two hours to try, rcprimant
and fine us for our drunken and dis
orderly conduct.
Or course the train went of will
my charmcr. 1t went off without hel
pocket-book. never saw her again
although made diligcnt search ant
advertised in the daily papers. Bu
one unfortunate day, some months
after, | encountered Il male membel
of her family, who made some scriou:
charges against me connected will
the dcsertion Of a lady aud stealing
her pocket-book. tried to explain
but, failing to get my words il
satisfact ctorially, was forced to make al
assault on this male member OF hel
family, that ended i'll some black eye:
tIiu DlOOuS llOSts.
Now what was the good of putting
that aged female under my care? Il
only led t" her giving me that pork
et-book and the catastrophe that fol
lowed. She could just rs well hav,
gone off on the Pennsylvania Centr;,
" ithout as with me. The thing is al
outrage. lfpcoplc want to put thei
females under the care of anybody
let them try the conductors-thcy ar,
hired for such purposes-and not in
pose upon innocent passengers.
was reminded of this by an ad
venture that happened to mc tn
other night in New York. wa
about leaving on the O'Clock trail
for Washington, when man, wh'
in search of me, approached, know
he was in search of me. He was i,
search of some respectable, bencvo
lent individual. to put 4 woman un
der his care. Aid he did. She hap
pcned to be rather good Hooking, an.
| didn't object i'll violent way, bu
| was neither very graceful nor gra
cious over the compliment. When
came OBSCURE section in the sleep
ing car, found that . delegation o
pious people were going to Washing
ton on some charitable business, ali,
had taken nearly all the berths. Sc
cured two--at least thought had
and marched my female, with he
two carpet-sacks, ,>trap-sacliel, "A mock
ing bird, and silk umbrella, witt
u waterproof and two shawls don
up in straps, iBto l6l. When we ar
rived inside, l learned for the frs
time that my unprotected femal
could not abide the slceping-cars. Sh
said she felt like suffocating, and
wished secretly she would sufiocatc
but when We came to occupy ou
berths, made two disagreeablc dis
covcries. The first was that the tw,
tickets called for the same berth; tn
other that this berth was the uppe
one. My female friend said positive
ly that she could not get into tha
berth. informed her that it was he
only chance to sleep, and she told IN
that would rather sit up. then CAV
here the further information that tina
was all very well, but in sleeping
car there was 10 place TO sit excep
OH wash-basim, and that, l thought
would be rather inconvenient. A
last, with tho aid Of step-fathcr, til
steward. and two pious old pomp,
my unprotected female was booste
into her roost, and the curtains close
over her fer the night.
| Then came the question rs to whs