The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1872-04-13
WIT AND WISDOM.

! CAUGHT her gently by the arm, my
gentle. blue-eyed Kate. She cried, Il Let
%, You fool-you hurt my vaccinate."
WHY was Noah bad mouser Give
It up." Because he was forty days
and forty nights before he found ary rat
(Ararat).
~. All, parson. wish l could take my
gold ~ith me, !" said dying deacon to his
pastor. "It might melt, was the consoling
reply.
A NAN who was told by clergyman 10
remember Lots wife, replied that he had
trouble enough with his own without r.
membering other mems wives.
AT the Logansport, Ind, mite society
meetings, the ladies' play Copenhagen for
the good q the cause, and make the
gentlemen who participate pay at the rate
of q dollar an hour, or ten cents a single
buss.
SMITH and Jones at a menagerie. Con
versation on Darwinism. Look at that
monkey said Smith Think of it's be-
ing an undeveloped human N " Human N
said Jones contemptuously, tits no more
human than | am.
A CoNSE,TICUT paper tells the story Of a
new hay At one of the Sunday schools
The precocious youth was asked who
made all the beautiful hills about them
and remarked that he did not know,
as his parents only moved in town the day
before
''WHo is it that goes about the earth,
seeking whom he may devour r asked
l. 4 G.kh khav-
shouted Tommy Jones He explained
the matter to his Mortified instructor by
saying that his father was local reporter
who "did" supPers.
A STOICAL Scotchman was addressed BY
his sick wife, Oh, John, | sha'nt leave
this bed alive III Please theeself, Betty,
and theeI please me, returned John, with
great eduanimity Il have been a good
wife to You, John, persisted the dying
woman. "Middhn', Betty" responded the
matter-of- fact husband.
On the ay-leaf Of a Madison Bible the
following prayer is written. 20, Lord, grant
to us, Thy devoted servants, that we may
return to our respective homes with as clear
a conscience as we have brought into this
Internal place. Grant to us that we may
never be led into the temptation of
returning TO the Legislature, but deliver
us from the evil of that foolish ambition.
Mr.. TAYLOR, the late sailor preacher, Of
Boston. astonished divine who had re-
fused To enter his pulpit because Uni
tartan minister had been in it, by falling on
his knees on the pulpit stairs and crying
out 40, Lord deliver us in Boston
from two things-bad rum and bigotry
Thou knowest which is worst, for | don't
A FARMER who was sympathiZing with his
neighbor. Jones, on the death of his son,
said "You should remember, Mr.. Jones,
there is no loss without some gain. John,
YOU remember, was always a monstrous
eater" ~ know he was, responded the
bereaved parent but to think he was
laid up with the rheumatism all the winter
and died Just in haying time, is pretty
tough, neighbor.
Two eminent clergymen Of Brooklyn
one an Episcopalian and the other Uni
| tarian-met in crossing the Wall street fer
~. Joking being in order, the churchman
said Brother --, if were not an
Episcopalian, / would be a Unitarian.
why 50 p was the question. Because
| always had my mind made up To be-
either something or nothing Was the an
swer.
THE local reporter Of the Lawrence
Tribune" is in bad way. He has beer
recently converted, and, in consequence, u
obliged to notice amusements very mildly
In announcing the appearance Of a minstre
troupe, he s%s: For those who do not
consider it a sin To witness minstrel
shows, this entertainment will furnish 2
pleasant relaxation from the revival meet
ings."
An English clergyman high church
man-was preparing a number q young
women last month February for conhrma
ton. Among them was one who tells thIi
story lyon all doubtless know, my gooc
girls, said he, addressing them with atec
tiOnate earnestness, what next Wednesday
isr "Oh, yes, sir," they all exclaimed
, "it Is Valentines Day" They were rgh
enough, but il was also Ash Wednesday
; which happened to fall on the l4ththis year
: and the coincidence was fatal to its preten