The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1872-12-13
PLAIN DEALER,

paper as being printed ON cheese
press, with shoe pegs for type
Billy Florence says there is an Alb
hey in Ireland where they show TIVE,
skulls Of Shakspeaic-onc when he
was little boy and one when he was
man.
"A reporter on an ever ing paper at
Dcs Moines died after free lunch. II
his departed spirit could return from
the regions of the blest CD it would
softly murmur--pickles /!
a Western editor says Of a ncighbo,
with a quivering eyclid, that lie "stut-
tcrs in the left eye !"
A little girl at school read thus :
The widow lived on small limbacy,
left her by relative.' What DO
call Tue NoIu aShcu tllc tcaCiiei ,
1.-the word is legacy, not limbacy.
But, Miss Johnson" said the little
girl, "Pa says | must say limb, not
leg
A good deacon of Cory, who had
been attending court at Erie, the next
morning after his return, in taking !;
knife out of his pocket, brought forth
a .'shoe buttoner' that didn't belong
to his wife or any of the family. The
wife says if he don't stop that kind OF
business he will have to 60 to Erie t.
attend court on his own account.
"Put me in my little bed," is now
rendered thusly: "place this wearied
piece of animated clay in the recep-
tacle constructed by mechanical gem, ,
wherein drowsy humanity may enjo,.
tired natures sweet restorer.
care you not afraid that whisky'lI
get into your head p asked stranger
of a man he saw drinking at bar.
"No,' said the topper, this liquor S to
weak to climb
II want Young Mans Compan-
ion, said spruce customer to book
seller. every well,' said the book
seller, picking up a volume, ''there :
MY Only Daughter. "
At fair in New York there is o!fc =
ed for sale an "antcdote for love, .
the contents Of one vial OF which are
SAID to be cure for the most aggra-
waited case. The 'contcnts' are !;
'.neat little mitten.'
Two ballots, taken out Of a Detroit
b allot-box had each five dollar
greenback folded inside.
A well-known humanitarian, VIII,
is proprietor of a corner store, talks d
providing warm bricks for the loal2:s o
stand on.
God hands gifts to some, whispers
them to others.
A wise man changes his mind, foo.
never.
"Great talent renders man famous;
great merit pro cures repsect; great
learning esteem; but good breeding
alone ensures love and etfection."
What comes once in minute, twice
a moment and once in mans lif !!
The letter IN.
The Brainerd Tribune claims that
the twenty hotels Of that city are fu,l
all the time.
''There is hardly any bodily blemish
which a winning behavior will not cvn
ceal or make tolcrable; and there is ut
external grace which i'll nature Or disaf
fectel will not deform."
The man who was charged with
six wives excused himself
by saying he was trying to find
a good one.
Fairbault has suffered two disastrous
fires during the last ten days, and now
her citizens are moving ener getically
for the purchase of a steam fire engine.
A workingman in Connecticut saved
from drowning little boy, the son Of
a wealthy woman, who, in a noble
burst of maternal gratitude, rewarded
him with thrce-cent postage stamp.
Thus was the poor fellow unexpectedly
enabled to write to his idolizcd mother
in-law for the first time perhaps III
twenty years.
The Fashionable Poodle now wears
his mistress monogram.
Young ladies who are learning t.
skate are putting more stuffing in their
waterfalls and making other prcpar-
atoms for falling down on the ice.
Little minds are tanned and sublued
by misfortune, but great minds rise
above it.-lrving.
a man out i'll Kansas said he could
drink quart Of Cincinnati whiskey,
and he did it. The silver mounting on