The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1872-09-05
The story OF "a Terrible bondage ma
Complete DU%Iiyerance,

A correspondent of the Detroit 7rjb
"ne gives the following thrilling state
mcnt OF his experience in the bondage
OF habit, and remarkable deliverance:
III jests who never felta wound"
Some will read this with passing inter.
est-it touches not them Others with
n thrill in the soul which will eynross
longing, hope, doubt every word is
theirs
In the winter of 1916, after having
received Mt different times in the provi.
GUS two years, opium as medicine from
regular physicians, | was on Il dcsolate
voyage, homcward bound. Coming
from the tropics, all sun, and flowers,
and smiles, ! found myself icc-bound
on the Father Of waters. A drcary voy-
age overland for a long distance was be-
fore myself and fellow passengers. One
OF these was n prominent physician. !
was telling him how pleasing and won
derful the effect of mOrplia was upon
me. "Ah, then your system is adapted
to it's use" Unfortunate words; cost.
ing n million times more than their
worth afterwards. ! would willingly
have cut off my right hand, or pluckcd
out my right eye not to have heard his
words, OF needed their hint.
That night | swallowed n grain of
opium. No pen or tongue can begin to
describe the delicious and marvellous
effect; every nerve was put to delight
tnl rcpose every sense was lullcd into
luxury. The brain was quickcncd to
an extraordinary capacity cloquencc,
argument, poetry was unlocked from its
embrace, and rcvcled in their new fledg-
ed powers; the Imagination suddenly
unfolded angelic wings and scared to
Paradise. Was it sleep or dream?
Neither. The body all of n sndden
needed no rest it was Tapped in II luz
ury Of new life. "Tho winter Of my
discomfort had given place to n glorious
summer"
After about "a hours from that first
experience, there was u back swing Of
the pendulum, II complete letting down
and Infringing Of the system which in
my greatness | could not understand.
On my commenced overland trip, the
cold pierced me my nerves were nm
strung, bowels disordered. At length,
III mere ~wantonness, | took n bit Of OPT
nm. Presto what an entire revolution
WEAKNESS, cold, pain, gayepIacc to their
OppOsltes. The whole secret was mine,
and from that time for "a years | could
no moro fOrego the use of opium than
of food one wa Just as regular us the
other. As for the daily amount to whose
use ! grew, it matters not it was large
enough.
But | desire not to speak further of
the pleasures Of opium. My purpose is
more with its pains, and | hasten to
speak Of that wrctchcd counterpart
which always and certainly makes re
prisaIs ON Illicit pleasure pleasure
against or beyond the moderation Of
nature.
One offset wns felt from the first. |
carried about n secret which ] i%uStinc-
lively kept covered, and made painfully
burdensomc. A voice in the soul cries
out against any wrongs being done it.
secret was tingcd with a sense Of
guilt, or why hide it?
| was in the hands of u coming enc
my. At length ! began to ask, in some
thing Of n terror what is to bethc end?
Am | to realize Charles Lambs picture
bound fast Mt the root of n tree, my
right hand being nailed to Il strong
limb, and then II beautiful being, but ~
cruel nv hell, applying II serpent to my
] read DE Quincy's terrific cX.
pcricncc, and his srpcrhuman efforts at
dcIivcrancc. ] read Colcridgc, and
those sorrows Of hell that got hold upon
him. trcmblcd, but thus far ] only
trcmblcd. My experience was to come.
And come it did.
At first n dark cloud began to let
down upon me; II pail of dcsolatcncss
to settle upon things, The aims of life
became fiat and stale; motive was being
lost; life grew mechanical: company
had no charm change Of scene no
condition, and made so many dcspcr-
ate and fruitless efforts to remove it by
the roots, that ! finally sank down into
the conviction that no solf-eilorts are
equal to the difficulty to be met. De
Quincy said, sit is II chain that is to be
unwound link by link, coil by coil, back
to the beginning Fitz Hugh Ludlow
tells us one-pcrhaps himself who said,
Good helps in every trouble but this;
here onemust claw his way through liv-
ing fire."
Opium troubles extend to dreams and
night visions. What an idea that, just
it gave the most delight, it turns
to rend you and oxalt over its ruin. The
AS soon MS the narcotic begins
to lose its virtue, become terrible and
long. Time loses its element OF compu
minutes become hours nights
know no ending, but stretch out toward
the crack of doom.
At length came Il crisis, i'll 1867. My
physical manhood was n wreck, Il shell.
The mind was worse: Memory had be-
come treacherous, and hopclcssuess
took possession of the soul. | camc
across Fitz Hugh Ludlow's book, "thc
Habit, y and devourcd it to see
if | could find some way of escape.
opened II correspondence with the an
thor. Nothing came of it. There was
no return over the long track. The
gates were barred. ! felt it, knew it.
How long can this go on? Is there no
help What will be tho end?
Sitting in the office one December
evening in 1870, the mail came III, and
| opened II blue covered pamphlet
"Great Discovery; Il Sure Remedy for
Opium" Barely glancing at its pages,
[ saw the usual number Of certificates.
: Quack = exclaimed, in indignation
miserable comforter y and | opened
,he stove door. About giving 1t to the
my eye caught the name OF fltz
Hugh Ludlow attached to n letter from
lin. All then / will mt least read 1t.
'erhaps here is a clcw how this happens
o be directed to me.