Oregon Republican. [volume] (Dallas, Or.) 1870-1872, 1872-01-20
Facts and E1:sHaCaes.


Stump speech-Uttering challenge.
The "new cut The Suez Canal.
Corn exchange-The chiropodist's fee.
A mental morsel-A bit Of ones
mind.
The father Of the cereals" pop
corn.
The forests are in danger when the
wood chops.
How old is ship when she is at
her anchorage?
The only persons who really enjoy
bad health are the doctors.
Why is sweet scent like blind al
ley {? Because it is nose treat Ono
street.
Can an g unvarnished tale" IN any
way be regarded as u polished produc-
tion?
GA backward spring" is produced
by presentinga ii red hot poker to u mans
nose.
Rumor IL vagrant without home,
and lives upon what it kan pick up
Billings:
Laws, like sausages, ceases to inspire
respect in proportion Us we know how
they are made,
Sum folks, as they gro older, gro
wiser; but most folks simply gro stub.
borner -Josh Billings
asking blessing before
meat, and abusing the yictuals through
the entire meal.
An Indiana man has just shot him-
self ufter three weeks Of marriage. lie
could not stand grief.
As every rib serves as brace, We
do not see how there are SO many bach
elors in the world,
" Scrambled hair is the latest FASH
ion" 1t has long been concomitant
Of boardiughouse omelettes,
"Whnt is home without a mother = +"
rs the young lady said when she sent
tie old lady to chop wood.
"Why is the earth like black
board 7" Because the children of men
multiply upon the face of it.
Stars are clearly the bes; astron>
omers, Iecalse they have studded tie
heavens since the creation.
Altho. the world is chunk full of
liars, thare is but few men who don't
prefer to listen tew the truth
| An innocent writer informs Us that
! mankind embraces woman He would
be funny kind Of man who did not.
. Darling it's bed time. al th,
/ little chickens have gone to bed
:. \ es, mamma, so has the old hen"
\ Mr. Pikklaton was recently mar
| ried at the Walnut street church, In
| Philadelphia to "a Miss julia Sardlnc
When u woman tries to catch rich
man, it is evident that she cares les,
about hu,banding him than ais cash
Tie meancst man in Kentucky is
the one who recently sold at auction
the personal effects OF his deceased
wife.
People Of Wyoming don't know
whether to call their female judge Il
justicess of the peace or justice of the
| peaceSs.
Nature has never been called unmod-
est, yet no sooner does Old Winter
walk through her forests than she shows
her naked limbs.
Whenever you sec a vain person
continually talking about himself, you
may make up your mind that he has
not much to talk about
Fame is of great service in introduce
ing man into society, for as soon us he
is known to Fame every one is desirous
Of making his acquaintance.
Natures sun rises in the morning
and goes to rest at nightfall. Many of
the rising sons of the present day get
up at noon and retire at daybreak.
1t has been said that there is no one
so happy as maiden in her teens.
We have seen many old soldiers who
were fully as happy in their canteens.
Many fops wear officers uniforms
with the intention of pleasing the fair
sex. They seem to think that if they
can only look like soldiers the ladies'
will deem them killing creatures.
THE SCoLDs vocABULARY.-The
copiousness of the English language
perhaps was never more apparent than
in the following character, by lady of
her husband:
" He is i" she says " an abhorred. bar,