The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1872-05-18
STANLEY IN AFRICA.

ELI and the Livingstone Expedition In-
separable.
From the New York Commercial Advertiser,
May 1911
AFRIKy, May onst, 1900 and II.
DEAR NEvy ELL
am still her in the afrikan howlin wilderness
with Doc. Livingstone. Afriky Is wen bilt place.
No loren 70 kud ever git here. We kud lick the
world or tina expedited to kun hear TO attack us
Mr.. Stanly OF the HERALD, is still with us. We
have made him chaplin to the expedishun. His
fort Is in ministerng to our spiritual kumfOrt. But
alas Stany has got to taking too much spiritual
kumfort hisself.
The untlmey news of his dcth went hard with
him, and when he herd OF Mr.. Greeey's nomina-
shun by 10 tarir konvention, and herd that Mr.
Bennit had bought hissef white hat also, and had
COVE orders for all the HERALD fellers to their
pantaloons in their boots, he took to drink He
sed his eagle eye flashed with indignashun, that
he kud stand 1t to die now and then, and be cheer
full about IT. but-when Mr.. Bennit asked him to
eat graham bread hsself, give up his own beer for
cistern water endorse hi tariff when he believed in
10 tariff, give up journalism and 60 West onto
farm, or join the army and drive everybody out Of
Boston and New York at the pint of the baonet to
work on farms In the Western wilderness-when
Mr. Bennit asked him to send his African letters
"cafe OF the Tffbune," then he'd be darned II he
wouldn't rebel and start a branch paper in Ethiopia
Mr.. Stanly went on so that we had to bid large
asylum to gard him, and employ kumpany OF the
lister Regiment to put him in He is now locked
up, and old Liv SEE chats what we all kali him
here) he SEE that the expedsbun kan now go on
gttin lost without being disturbed.
Afriky is quiet place. Here we have no wars
no Unions to save, no konstitushuns to brake, no
Presidenshul elccshuns, and no Wall street PAN
icks. While you hav your Wall street, with her gi-
gantick kommerce, her Bulls and Bears, ana her
Jackasses, here providence favors us, and keeps
lost TO the world Providence may favor you by
kindly permitting you to morrow money, and by
permitting you to fail In bizness now and then, hut
you has your drawbacks. While providence per-
mts you to fleece other people he also permits
Yes here all is peaz No war clouds huver
around the fair brow OF Afriky-no proud eagle Is
always pckin fife, an we have stars and stripes
which always want to be carried to the front. We
don't do any rallying around the nag here.
How dilrcrent-alas how changed Is things In the
In Mexiko in the marble halls of the Montezu-
mas, all IL warm the Old World empires Ii tot
term and Dynastaries is crumbn, but here there
why Doc Liv' seq ef Zoe Klanin shud KUN over
hear and talk about commanding Afrlkan Regi.
ment, he wod shut her up with Stany. And If
Miss Wood Hull shud KUN over hear and try to
demoraze End cuzin OF Frederick Dugas, why
he wqa kri aayock am let loos at the dogsmhe
never did, but I'd get q substitute. In the late
war the Perkinss were only OF service far as the
moral influence of their names went. They were
foremost in battle-running home. Tina were like
Mr. Train, Mr.. Greeley, and Gineral Nye. Tha
stood around the old bird Of freedom to get her
quils Tina didn't keep singing ''Ray round the
flag, boys but they stade to home on purpose to
rally around IL, and Will say, my deer Nevy Ell,
that you kan do more takin for liberty and more
Litchfleld county. You kan. I've often told Mr..
Grant and Ginera Greeley about your bravery ut
Gettysburg-hOw you were In the thickest Of the
fife, carrying waiter to the rebels. think Gineral
one day last February when ! went up to Chap
paqua with the great agricultural TO assist him in
planting oats, husking potatoes, thrashing apples,
and moving his immense ice CROP he spoke OF your
military qualities.
"To what great military act in the life OF Ell do
you refer to, Horace ~ asked
"why mean his skill in conducting retreat"
replied Horace, scratching his head with the edge
OF his axe, which he always kept dull for that pur
pose.
ssWhy, when he fell back In good order from the
stock Exchange and marched to the oblique hori-
z0ntle on his left ear up Broad street. Yes, sr,''
said Horace, as he ate red radish and drank
eleven gallons OF cool spring water, "Tve seen the
time that your Nevy ELL was as brave man as he
ever was, and II ever succeed In Citing into Office
I'm going to appoint him into the marine service
and send him tO--Alasky.n e
But my litter Is already 2 long. started ont to
ask you to send me my umbrella. l left it In the
Prayer Meeting up to DR.. U-ers l think some OF
those I'll Church felcrs stole 1t to carry In the pro-
cession. You know those Hi Church fellers borrow
good many umbrelas-tha want them to keep
lent. II yOn find it send IL by the same rOut which
you ship u by, or by vanderbilts Underground, and
Believe me look for ivory handle
Yours Affeckshunate,
CONSIDER Perkins,