Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1872-08-28
Word about Home Training


To be good and disagreeable, IS high
treason against virtue, yet how many
expect an agreeable manner will come of
itself or else think nothing about IL and
take no care to make their ways pleasing
to those about them The most tIrcsome,
disagI eeable people have no idea that they
are So and our dislike to their society Is
often caused by little things entirely in
their power TO avoid or correct, little things
by which they themselves are annoyed
when practiced by others Handsome IS
that handsome does, too often Is interpre-
ted 10 refer 10 lrtat Is done, not tar 1t Is
done. It should mean both
Household training should include the
culture Of manner and taste. No one
wishes TO see atfectations and artificial
ways in children, but we make mistake
il We suppose they will always be agreeable
if they are simply natural. Nature in
the ideal is charming nature in the real
life Of common humanity Is often uncouth
and unattractive and needs TO be carefully
trained into ways Of beauty.
ApPeutes and propensities arr INDUCED
in uncouth and selfish ways, and ignorance,
ba.hiuuess ana curiosity form awkward
and rude habits Now and then we meet
rare and gracious nature, which in child
hood and maturity Is pleasing in all its
outgoings, but few people have that inward
beauty and outward grace which make the
unrestrained expression Of themselves al
ways agreeable to another. We have
little peculiaritieS, obliquitie>. physical
defects, personal habits, which obtrude
themselves unpleasantly unless we keep
guard over them. We are not naturally
unselfsh we have not sympathetic judg-
ment, quick perceptions, and tact that Is
keen and tender, SO that We may trust to-
our instincts to make Us winning and agree
able in our intercourse with others How
many talk necessarily without questioning
whether others enjoy it How many are
silent and moody without recognition of
any social claims How few are thought
ful to avoid touching roughly another's
sensitive points, to be tender of their
weaknesses, and considerate of their ego
tisms Suggestions, cautions, and re-
straints must be continually used in the
home education to form the . second
nature" which shall be as unaffected as
that Of the unframed child, and far more
unsefsh and attractive Some things
must be repreSsed, others developed, the
tastes and comfort Of other people must be |
studied to create such a spirit within, and |
manifest its outgoings in such ways that a
courteous, considerate bearing shall be a |
natural expression, that the forms and gra-
ces Of manner shall be as spontaneous as
the kindly feeling.
A winsome address, pleasant tones, gen.
ial feelings, responsive thoughts, are well
worth eultivating. They constitute the |
sweetness Of polileness. 1t is a wondrous |
power, the power to make another happy. |
Rightly trained and used, it develops a |
personal influence wide and strong, a mau-
velous force, centered in the individual |
and radiatiDg in ever-increasing circles
The desire to please may degenerate into
personal vanity and selfish love of admi- |
ration, but sanctifed by Christian consecra-
ton, 1t rises into heavenly grace.
1t is shame to Christian households that
1t is often urged as 4 reason for sending
children to dancing schools, &" that they
may improve in manners and learn how to
appear In society" Is there no refined |
and gracious wamanhood, no gentle and
courteous manhood, no good breeding in
the household? Are there DO polite social
forms, no etiquette, culture, and taste, in |
Christian homes 3? Shall the children 90 |
out to the world to learn the forms of that |
charity, gentleness, forbearance, and unset. |
fshness, which are the essentials of the |
Christian character they seek to attain 3?
Many good people ignore the necessity