The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1872-08-02
[SBURG, PA, FRIDAY, AUGUST 2. 1872.

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since tne happy time when he sat on
that fbnce and conversed with the be.
nighted philanthropist with the UNI
brella and high hat. But Thomas said
he was satisfied. He had the cash, and
felt frstrate. No pang of remorse
botheied him and he didn't want to be
q boy again, but he enjoyed himself
just a4 he was, spending his revenue,
and hl.ving everybody considering him
a magnificent fellow, which they didn't
whenTie was poor and even had the
hardipood to assert that he would do
just he had done again.
Die wanted to be great. So he got
electe justice Of the peace, and he let
up OF hardened criminals, who had
perpelrated frightful crimes, on condi-
tilu taat they would vote for him for
common council. So they did, and he
was elected. And then he gave out
contracts TO rascally politicians who
could rob the treasury as much as they
wanted to, provided they would send
him 70 the legislature, which they ac-
cordingly did And when he got there
hevoeed for the dead-wood corporations
and railroad swindles for the fellows
who promised to make him Governor,
and then he began to pardon all the
pickPockets and thieves out of the
penisentary and wink at all the frauds
practiced in the legislature, so as to be
sent to the Senate-which he was !;
and now he is loading his dice to be
Pres dent, and very likely he will be
some day or other.
But now, at the very pinnacle of fame
does he sit down, and at the goal of his
ambition say to himself how hollow are
all these honors ?-how distasteful all
this power and grandeur, when pur-
chased at the sacrifice of honesty and
self respect and decency? Do the cares
of the State weigh heavily upon him,
and does he place his throbbing brow
upon sleepless pillow and sigh for the
rest of his boyhood's early years?
1 think not. He merely observes that
he wouldn't trade places with any man.
His only regret is that he can't hold
three or four offices at the same time,
and when he looks back upon the time
when he sat upon the fence, he thinks
how if he had hold of that old man with
the parasol and stovepipe hat, he would
give him an Office and see if he couldn't
embezzle enough Government funds to
get himself tile and silk umbrella-for
that's what he would do himself under
similar circumstances.
Harry started out with the intention
of being good, and it is hardly necessa-
ry to state that he made himself abject-
ly miserable.
He never could enjoy himself with
the other boys stoning cats and fighting
roosters, and never once, in the whole
course of his life, did he experience the
joy Of going for some farmers apples.
His mother wouldn't let him go SWIM
ming or boating, and so he stayed at
home while the other fellows were hav-
ing good time. And he never went
to the circus or menagerie, but he used
to stand outside and hear the hyena
growl, and see the other boys creeping
under the tent, and listen to them
laughing at the clown, and then go
home and feel what a miserable de-
pressing thing it was to be good, any
how.
Anyhow he had no friends, and then,
when he grew up, he went into busi-
ness; but he was so unpleasantly up
right that the wicked men-being the
larger part of the communicated how
great reproach his example was, and
they stayed away from him, and he
failed, and the sherif-who was an i'm
pious old customer, came on him and
confiscated his whole concern, and put
him in Jail, and when he got out-being
poor and having no friends--he took
board in the almshouse, and eventually
died there in such an exemplary man
ner that everybody was glad of it, be-
cause it had such a good influence on
the other unreconstructed paupers.