The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-07-12
sCrssoRINGs.


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The convicts at the Michigan State
Prison are buildings new wall around
themselves.
Locusts are in Tennessee in inn
mense numbers, and the woods are
alive with them.
DIR. Bartol says the real thief of
the world is he who consumes more
than he produces.
A California clergyman is the only
living white man, who is master OF
the Choctaw language.
An insane asylum at Troy has a
small theater attached where anna
teurs give performances.
An Illinois farmer has fifteen acres
of hops, and expects q profit of five
hundred dollars per acre.
When a man "sees double" it is
generally an indication that he is
ssbeside himself with liquor"
A Texas Judge lately imprisoned
the entire bar in the place, except
the district attorney, for contempt.
In Paisley, Scotland, one of the
greatest impediments to justice isthe
length of the policemen's mustaches.
Jersey lightning-one of the
sbenighted casting up results of last
nights "sitting up with sickfricnd."
The beauty of getting tight on
ship-board is, that the ladies pity the
s'poor handsome dear, who is so sea-
sick"
They have q tribe of Indians in
California who live without sleep.
What famous editors they would
make.
Gov. Geary, of Pennsylvania. has
signed the bill prohibiting the sale
or giving away of liquor during cleo
ton days
The duty on tobacco was placed al
d cents per pound. A Western iu'
dicial district was established in NORTH
Carolina.
"A Green Bay man was NEAR
enough to elope with the only school.
J teacher in the town, thus shutting uT
1.-THE school.
An Iowa groom was so delighted
with the marriage ceremony that he
insisted upon having it repeated
5 eleven times.
, Punch says the difference between
the sofa and its fair occupant is about
as great as between an ottoman and
a knot-o'-womanl
Because people in Auburn, Il. Y,
find snakes in their drinking water,
they are so fastidious as to shut their
teeth while drinking.
A woman who is considered by her
-adorer as "worth her weightin gold
is not such a catch after all; her val
ne being about $50, 900.
An old lady in Winooski, Vermont,
|. has just reached her ninety-ninth
year. and has had twenty three chill
dren by the same husband.
A little busy ssbumble bee" drove a
man ont of church at Indianapolis,
the other day, by trying to gather
honey from his bald head.
The indianapolis Jouynel says that
the potato bugs viii poll a heavy
vote IN Indiana this fall, and sweep
the state by irresistible majorities.
A Memphis dentist and the gentle
partner of his joys and sorrows have
been held to trial in Sc, 1000 for fog
sging a little girl nearly to death.
A California ~countryman CAPPED so
wonderingly at a stylish Dolly Var
den, that the services of a physician
were required to set his dislocated
jaw.
An irenical story comes from st.
Louis to the effect that a bar of iron
fell on a mans head from a height of
twenty feet and didn't hurt the iron
a bit.
On Mount Etna there is an old
-chesnut tree which is SO large that
one hundred horsemen can find shell
ties under its branches from a rain
storm.
Political "half mourning" is the
fashionable color for ladies of a eer-
tain clique; tbs formed of Woodruff
white and Douglas black neatly
crossed.
A servant at a party, to whom his
master was calling impatiently to
fetch this, fetch that, answered.
seSir everything We have in the wur-
raid is on the table.
A young man in Augusta, Wis,
recently killed a companion while in
toxicated, and the father of the MUIR
dered youth has sued the saloon
keeper for SIG. 900.
There is a minister in Minnesota
who is loud in the announcement that
the world will not outlast the present
summer. And vet he he has planted
100 acres of wheat.
An Irish servant girl thinks that
when she gets to heaven she will not
he required to darn stockings after
midnight, for all the angels she ever
saw were barefooted.
There is one fright" on which,
thank Heaven! a woman cannot en-
trench; It's the glorious boyish priv
lege of standing on your head and
turning summer-saults.
.Grand. "A country paper lately