The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1872-08-16
THE PRESS.
FRIDAY MORNING, AUGUST 16, 1872.
Gossip and Gleanings.

Gossip and Gleanings.
Timber culture is not bad business if a
man can afford to wait. Half century ago,
worn out field in Western Connecticut was
planted with young trees, and when cleared
last year, produced fifty cords per acre, be-
sides furnishing fencing timber for the whole
farm and ten cords of wood annually for the
past twenty years. I Oh
A robin conquered bantam rooster in
Indiana and picked his eyes out one by one.
An alliterative Illinois reporter fathers the
following: "Parson Palmer of Padola is the
proprietor OF pen of pigs. These pigs es-
capped and prosecuted peaceable neighbor
named Piper. Piper prosecuted them ON his
premises with dog, and punished Palmer's
boy. The parson paid his respects to Piper,
prating of perspective prosecution, and was
in turn pounded to pulp by the precipitate
Piper. Thepenitent man at present languish-
es in prison."
Last spring the intelligent jury worked on
Mr.. Deberg, of Iowa, and sent him to the
penitentiary for five years. He has just been
set at liberty, the vague rumors of his inno-
cence having been confirmed.
A mild-mannered Dubuque woman entered
saloon, kicked over table, drew revolver
on the bartender and led her husband out
by the ear.
The Hon. John Jay, our minister to Aus
tria, is said to be the most exclusive and dig
nified of all our diplomatic representatives
abroad.
The only way to meet affliction is to pass
through it solemnly, slowly, with humanity
and faith, as the Israelites passed through the
sea- Then its very waves of misery will
divide, and become to us wall on the right
side and on the left, until the gulf narrows
and narrows before our eyes, and we land safe
on the opposite shore.
Joaquin Miller, the poet of the Sierras. or
as somebody cruelty calls him, the ''literary
vagrant," is coming to Boston.
A Lockport barber; the other day, pocketed
his razors and decamped. Just as he was
leaving he presented his wife with an old
pair of pants, with the remark that she had
always ''worn the breeches," and she might
keep these as souvenir of their family diff
culties. The woman wasn't very sorry for
his loss, and she did not weep inconsolably :;
but she hung up the old pants and labelled
them: ''Wanted-A man to fill these pants
There has never been man in them" The
deserted wife is peg ahead now.
An old lady, not a thousand miles from
Lowell, died at an almost centenarian age.
few days ago. Before her death, she gave
minute directions for her funeral Among
other things, she said she wanted to be ''laid
out'' in her black silk gown, and they must
not take out the back breadth, as they did
when Sally Smith was laid out. ''For." said
the old lady, deprecatingly but seriously, what
figger Sally will cut at the resurrection,
without any back breadth in her gown p'-
A couple of Greeley men, on a street corner
in Syracuse, were discussing the probabilities
of the coming of the comet. The conversa-
ton was closed by one of them with the re-
mark: 'Well, let it come; anything to beat
Grant"
"Pay your score," said publican to a Gus
toner who was running up an account for
ale. ''Wait till I've had the score first; the
last mug only made ten.''
A visitor at Nantucket, who is deligted
with the island, declares it to be the '.loafer's
PARADISE ...a l.. #..
The man who called for tea, at an ordinary,
'as strong as the kick of mule" complains
that he got it Gas weak as a good resolution"
Strauss has returned to his home in the
suburbs of Vienna, and is regaling his coun-
trymen with marvellous tales about the Unit
ed States. M "n
The doleful Plantamour, says Western
paper, who predicted the destruction of the
earth in August by comet, has come out
| for Greeley. If.the earth does not come to
an end he wants the next best calamity.
Horace Ulysses is the name bestow cd ON
an unoffending Terre Haute infant by its
! cruel parents.
Notable among the notabilities of all sorts
that have been collected together at Geneva
this year is Ralph Keeler, the prince of Amer
ican Bohemians-ths man who, at home, has
been in turn canal boat driver, negro min
strel and writer in the Atlantic Monthly;