Connecticut western news., 1872-01-12
MY CONFESSION.

I never knew till this moment how strong is the yearning which impels one who has done with hope and life to pour o0t bis soul ,ntH some car, even if unslm- pathetic. For live cannot, though am 10th to dlc without leaving . true account ct ulv offence on record, knowing that there will be garbled reports, making my case even blacker than it is. l do not ex cuse it; have condemned myself, and when the sun rises shall have passed from world which has no goal for me in it. The girl love can never be mine my profess sional career is closed. Besides, could never bear the shame; or rather, it is the idea of learning to bear it, of becoming in- ured to infamy, which is tuo di grstirg
 The court-martial meets tomorrow would meet, l mean, ii there were any one to tIy. am under arrest in my quarters; my belt hangs wonder, limp and light, fer the adjutant has the sword. My revolver lies before me, to the left of the ink stand 1t serves for paper-weisbt as I fill these sheets.
 wonder does sEe remember that tea party where we first met ? A dull affair, farcl that It would be, but 1t proved the happieSt evening of my life. was an en- sign then, full of youthful hope and conf denee. 1 loved her that night and ever s;ncs. Our engagement was a foolish busi- ness, for had little means and no pros poets, and of course her parents disapprov- ed of it. It was with reluctance that they were persuaded to promise their ssent to our marriage when I got my company-a remote contingency, seeing that could not even purchase my first slep. got it Tn <kn% E,1 ot luck but as for rising hiSher. there was no prospect of it whatever and unless there was war, was likely to rcmain a lieutenant to the end of the chapter. l am alone, and not likely to be interrupted. No fellow knows me here at the depot if any one did, he would not feel anxious to claim acquaintance.
 When the man who acts as my servant brought the dinner, told him l should not want him till tomorrow morning, and gave him shilling; that will keep him at the canteen.
 How strange it was that she remained true to me year after year, while my regi nent was abroad Surely women have been maligned. That should be faithful was no wonder at all my near relations were dead, and man must cling to some. thing.
 It was at Brussels, in the Wertx Gallery that once saw a picture which is distinct in my brain. Tue suicide has just fired with an effect grotesquely terrible; his good angel is floating away, with sorrow. ful, averted face; bis bad angel, stern o look, offers second weapon-ncedlessly.
 But all this has nothing to do with my present purpose, which is to write dowr an accurate account of the circumstance. whics have brought me to my present DO sitIon.
 l was on guard one night at Gibraltar and had spent many solitary hours in read ing over her last letter, and in repinine against that poverty which formed an iror barrier between us, till felt ready to dt any desperate thing for money, and wishct that the old fables about contracts witt evil were true, and that had the chsnc, of mating one. had been my rounds. bu unable to remain still iA my guard-room, wandered out again along the Qualifications alone. There was no moon, but by star light could distinguish the sea, the out lines of the nearest sbips, better than th form of . gun which was close to me, be cause the latter had an extra shade throwl over it by the parapet. l don't knoy what made me notice this. but did, an, moved my position to try how much bette I could see the gun when was facing tn embrasure. It is astonishing wtat 1ittl things play with the attention when th mind is brooding. As was peering abou the gun, a voice from it startled me:
 rIr. Singleton, sir for Gods sake hay mercy, and do net call the guard SC you have discovtre6 me, and throw mysel on your pity. It is life I am trying for give me chance, sir"
 cannot imagine why did not seize th man ana give the aiaIm at once. knev who he was-one Taylor, deserter wh had lived for months on the mainland wit band of Spanish thieves, and who wa identified by an English noblcman, travel ing in public diligence little whi.e back as concerned in the robbery of it.
 He had been apprehcnded and hande over ta the garrison authorities and [ one of the passengers had been killed the affair. md there was conclusive ev dence that Taylor's hand had fired the fl tai shot, his fears for the result of his court martial wire well founded.
 Some strange iufatuation now made m hesitate and barley with the fellow. :, ttow uad you escape 2" asked.
 By the window of the cell" he replit in the same low, earnest, eager tons "Oh, sir, if you knew the difflcrlty hl -the despair with which l worked-tl mad JOY with which found myself fire, In another five minutes should have be- tate, cnly you saw me. I was born . kel tlsman; I eanEot hang like dog. Ha, pity"