Wyandot County Republican. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1869-1903, 1872-06-06
UPPER SANDUSKY, OHIO, THURSDAY 6, 1872.

keep clean if he washed himself in the
whole Atlantic Ocean once day" This
perversion of the message was immedi-
ately telegraphed to Russia by the Rus
sian Minister, and the Gar was so indig-
nant that he instantly declared war.
Just at this time President Greeley un-
dertook to write some letters to Prince
Bismarck upon the subject of potato rot,
and after giving his singular views at
great length, he concluded with the state
ment that if the Emperor William said
that subsoIl plowing was not good in
light soils, or that guano was better than
bonedust, he was "a liar. a villain, and a
slave" OF course the Emperor also i'm
mediately declared war, and became
an ally of Russia and of England,
against which latter country Mr.. Greeley
had actually begun hostilities already, be-
cause the Queen, in her speech from the
throne, had declared the Iri5une's advo-
cacy of tariff on pig-iron incendiary,
and calculated to disturb the peace of
nations
Unhappily, this was not the full mea-
sure of our disasters. The President had
sent to the Emperor of Austria copy of
his book, "What l Know" etc., with his
autograph upon fly leaf. The Emperor
mistook the signature for a caricature of
the Austrian eagle, and he readily Joined
in war against the United States, while
France was provoked to the same act by
the fact that when the French Minister
came to call on Mr.. Greeley to present
his credentials, the President, who was
writing an editorial at the time, not COM
pretending the French language, mistook
the Ambassador for a beggar, and, with
out looking up, handed him quarter and
q OrHar for q o1nan chirf md
hoe, and said to him, go West, young
man, go Westr'
So all these nations Joined in making
war upon the United States. They
swooped down upon our coast and landed
without opposition, for those exposed
portions of our unhappy country were
absolutely deserted. The President was
afraid to call away the army from Kansas
at first, for fear the outraged people
upon the plains would come East
in spite of him. But at last he did
summon the army to his aid, and it
moved to meet the enemy. 1t was too
late Before the troops reached Cincin-
natl the foreigners had seized Wash
1ngton and all the country east of the
Ohio, and had hung the President (whose
every member of Congress The army
disbanded in alarm, and the invaders
moved to the Far West, where they found
the population dying of starvation be-
cause they had followed the advice of
Greeley's book to "Try for your first crop
to raise lines, and don't plant more than
a bushel of quicklime in hill" Of
course these wretched people were at the
mercy of the enemy, who-to his credit
be it said-treated them kindly, fed them,
and brought them back to their old
homes. You know what followed; how
Prince Frederick William, of Prussia, as
cended the American throne, and the 9th
er humiliations that ensued. 1t was
fearful blow to republicanism, blow from
which it will never recover. 1t made US,
who were treemen, nation of slaves.
1t was all the result of our blind conf
dence in misguided old man who
thought himself philosopher. May
Heaven preserve you, my children, from
lhe remorse feel when l remember that
I voted for that bucolic editor!