Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1872-10-27
VARIETIES.

Can an electric eel be said to lead q
shocking life?
Who is the first boy mentioned in the
Bible? Chap. I.
A promising young mar is all very
well; better have paying one.
Among business men, those who are
most sharp generally get most blunt.
A london tradesman advertises "a
lucrative business for sale on account of
bankruptcy"
The chestnut crop in Switzerland and
Italy this season is the most bountiful
eve gathered.
Father. Hyacinthe is spending his
honeymoon in Brussels. He will, it Is
reported, settle in Munich.
Father Prout's genius was 50 illustri-
Gus that even Livy acknowledged il:
Proda cujusque iHgeaiifBl erGt.
An understood clerk in q dry goods
store, named William, objects TO being
referredto as "thatlittle dry-goods Bill"
A Dutch Judge, on conviction q a
culprit for having four wives, decided:
sHe have punishment blenty; IFS nit
One.n
A private letter from Strasburg says
that the departure Of Alsatians into
France continues like s. pilgrimage TO
Mecca.
To take down the gridiron from the
nail where it is hanging with the left
hand, is a sign that there viii be a bTon
in the kitchen.
An enthusiastic admirer Of horseback
exercise SAYS that the outside ola horse
is one of the best things possible for the
inside of q man.
Some genius has been heard to say
that pillows, though not belonging to
the human species, come under the
head of rational beings.
A sharp young woman says there IS
nothing more touching than to see a
poor but ~virtuous young man struggling
with a weak moustache.
President Theirs will reside this win
ter in the palace OF the Elysees. He viii
inaugurate public receptions similar to
those given at the White House, III
Washington.
The English government rendered Sir
Rounded Palmera fee of one hundred
and fifty thousand dollars for his services
in the Geneva arbitration, but he re-
fused all compensation.
"Arthur," said a goOd-natured father
to his s'young hopeful, y "I didnot know
till to-day that YOU had been whipped
last week. "Didn't you, PAP" replied
hopeful; "why, I knew it at the time"
a lively hoosier maiden wept when
she read how LOngfellOw had cut his pas
tern so as to ruin him for life. She was
so fond of his poetry, she said, as she
snuffled the pearly tear-drops from her
nose.
An Irish housemaid who was sent to
call a gentleman to dinner found him
engaged in using a toothbrush. swell,
is he coming? asked the lady. YES,
ma'am, directly he'sjust sharpening has
teeth ~
Punch addresses this rhyme to a
Sweet Innocent:
There was a Young Lady ofTenby,
Who wrote to her c~oHJjdantc: IN. I.
1 don't want TO wed,
NJ such thought in my head;
But-where can the eyes OF the men be?'
"Ma. why don't you speak?" asked
little Jake; "why don't yousay suthin'
funny?" "What can l say? Don't you
see I'm busy frying doughnuts? Say
suthin' funny, indeedr' "NOl, yer
might say, Jake, won't yer have a
cake? That 'ud be funny for you"
'tDoes the court understand you to
say, Mr.. Jones'" asked a judge, "that
YOU saw the editor of the AUgur Of Free
dom i~ntoxicated?n "Not at all, sir. I
merely said that l had seen him FREE
q~uently so Hurried in his mind that he
would undertake to cut out copy with
the snuffers-that's all"