The Republican journal., 1872-12-05
Tin Busts.


In this modern and artificial age. when
ladies' so love to stuff pad, lace and twist
the hnman form divine rs to make il
graceful, despite any little shortcomings
OF nature in the way of an imperfect fig
are, we are not astonisned to hear daily
Of new patents and inventions for aiding
the dress-maker in her laudable efforts to
improve natures handwork
Believing that something new was
needed ID give addit onal Prominence
contour. development, cndonpoim, or
what you will-to the female form, q
modiste in this city has lately invented
ana patented n tin bust A Chronicle re-
porter yesterday sought the inventress ut
her manufacturing rooms. Climbing a
flight OF stairs he raj ped timidly at her
door, for what man does not feel Shakv
when about to explore the mysteries of n
feminine toilet9 A plump, bright looking
little woman, with rosy cheeks, and t
smile that bespoke good humored cute
ness, opened the door and said "Wcll,
sir?n
eporter-Madam, am. al heard
excuse mc-I understand thai you are the
inventress Of tina b.b-that is
a tin model for ladies, madam
Modiste-Yes, sir; patent tin busts. Do
YOU wish 70 purchase one?
The reporter explained his occupation,
and informed the lady that he had merely
called, thinking that some Information
concerning the great invention would
prove of interest to the lady readers of
the Chronicle.
''Oh, dear 50 you are q reporter? Well.
| Iaafara | .i,prf E,nNu >vbat,a, I ,I,4rbt f.,
show YOU my patent bust or not. You
newspaper men-and especially the Chron-
icle men-are 50 saucy and then YOU are
so cruelty sarcastic sometimes that really
am afraid Of the Chronicle. though
would not do without it tol the world.
Now, | know you came up here to make
fun Of this bust OF mine, didn't you?'
Rep0rter-No, madam | assure YOU
came TO write something in the cause Of
science and Improvement.
Modiste-Well, then, | suppose I must
show it 70 YOU. 50 walk right III.
The reporter turned rs red as beet as
ne entered Il room where several comely
Girls were busy cutting and sewing some
thing, Tie took \ seat, nearly missing the
chair and remained very i'll ut ease while
the invcntress retired into another room
to get the wonderful bust The girls cast
misrhjevouS glances at him that made
llm feel like u eat III . strange garret
Presently the invcntreSs returned bearing
in her hands something that resem bled
John McCulough's st-plato when he
does ''Rchard III" She placed il in the
reporters lap, which started the girls to
gigglin@ again, and made him feel like
two strange cats in - garrett
Modiste-You see this is lust like the
body Of u lady. 1t is made Of tin and we
make them 10 any size.
Reporter How in the wOrld can lady
wear one Of these stiff, uncomfortable
things?
Modiste-Whv, deehA me, they do not
wear them at alI They are dummies
models on which to fit dresses.
At this point the girls screeched, and the
invenlress had to quiet them by a repri-
mand.
Reporter-Oh! see, YOU only adjust the
patterns on this-thls bust
Modistc-Yes: it's Just like fitting a
dress on Il I've woman, you see, only it
doesn't fidget like somea.of them. It's
convenient lon can tafcg it in your lap
when YOU arc fitting on the dress, and
you can't do that with I woman, YOU
know
The reporter blushed AMI said he rather
thought not
Modiste-oi course not and its not II
bit inconvenient 10 cary it around, though
it is 50 large. See mere, ,out my hat in
it, 1t makes splendid hat-box to put in
4 trunk while yon ere travelling ne-hat can't
Get smashed in it. We make them of all
sizes, aud furnish patterns, wire stand and
everything conn letc. so that lady can
adjust her bust to the highth of her figure,
and make q dress fit exactly Oh, it's ex-
tremcly conven' 'ent assure YOU If You
are rich, and cont want to bother with
running to your ,ress-maker so often to
oct Your new dress tried on to see how
it's being made, why, all You need is to
get bust and cave il at the drcss-maker's
with your order.
Reporter see ma am. Very nice al
rangement.
Modiste Yes. and if you are only re-
spectacle, and like to wear neat-liltino
dresses, but cam afford to pay dress
maker S25 for making one why can't YOU
get one of my tin-busts, and cut and fit
your own dressest Then, too, if You are
make y favorable display of you goods,
these are the best things You can get See
theret (aying her hands on two very visi-
bic pr"tuherances on the modeD that Just
sets off n bodice or sack c,armingly
Reporter-Suppose that those who order
these-nra ah-thcse invontions-are not
ur-ah-well developed, tall and straight
Modiste-Oh, that's the beauty Of these
busts II the purchaser is not well formed,
we make the busts so anyhow; and when
the dress is fitted to it, and padded, it is
real graceful, | assure you. We never
have any trouble about that.
Reporter-If young lady should pur-
chase one of these, would she not out
grow it and the dresses fitted to it become
too small9
Modiste-All that they have to do is to
send it back and get it enlarged. fits a
very fat woman and she grows lean, we
can make her tin bust smaller.
Here the reporter rose to 90, expressing
the belief that madam's great invention
would prove a success. He was politely
bowed out, and passed down the stairs.
When he reached the bottom he stood for
q moment pondering on the deceits of the
world, and of the tickle fair in particular
Just as he stepped into the street he felt
something strike him on the head, and
heard a peal Of silvery laughter from the
window above He picked up the soft
missile with which he had been struck.
1t was u lot of cotton rolled in paper
And this was the parting salute that the
tin bust girls gave the bashful Chronicle
man.
A blessed old lady being asked if she
ever had her ears pierced by the wall of
distress, sad she couldn't very well re-
member, but she believed it was done
with fork.
Why are young ladies at the breaking
up Of party like arrows? Because they