davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
The Funniest paner in the World.

New York is the best place in the
world for a comic paper TO die in.
Nevertheless, the experiment of trying
TO make one live there is TO be ain
tried. Never had humorous journalists
more to contend against. Besides the
countless periodicals that already cater
TO the popular taste in their columns of
Wit and Humor, Facetie," etc, a
new rival has taken the field. The
London Times has engaged first-class
Jester, and bids him devote himself ex-
clusively to American affair. Day after
day this man of merry mind publish es
excluciatingly funny thing, in which the
Province OF ST.. Louis vibrates from
the State of Montana to the "Terri.
tory of Memphis" His last venture is
i'll political news. We learn that Grant
has =" at present 1870 Electors against 76
pledged to support his antagonist" We
are also informed that, :" if the whole
Electoral vote of the Federation were
fused together TO form a Plebiscite,"
the results would be good. On both
these points, our writer is sure. He is
not always so confident, for he thinks
that Connecticut andVermont will prob
ably 40 with the New England States
but is not certain. This is as good as the
antique jest of the Dutch taking Hol-
land. If the Tines keeps this mirth.
maker on its staff, we fail to see how any
other comic paper can hope to compete
with lt.-ChicGg0 Tribune.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
When TO Cut Brush.

Brush shuld be cut when in the most
vigorously growing state and when in
fullest leaf. At that time the plant re-
ceives the greatest check from being
cut closely. Generally late in July or
early in August is a favorable time.
Perhaps it is better to cut 1t two or three
times during the summer if the time
can be spared, as repeated checks have
more effect than one single one. 1t is &
good and effectual plan to keep all sorts
of weeds from breathing during the
entire season; few withstand such a
course of treatment.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
Agricultural Items,

W. TATUM, of New Jersey, fed his
steers twelve quarts of corn and cob.
meal each day, and thought it better
than pure corn-meal.
Now IS the time to destroy weeds.
Burdocks, milkweed, thistles, and
every other rank growing plant should
be cut down and burned before the seeds
ripen.
CHARLES B. LEONARD. of Woodbury.,
n. j., has twelve cows which last year
averaged 23S pounds of butter each.
They were fed cornmeal and bran all
the year round.
In Washington Territory there were
raised last year, and exhibited in New
Cork, turnip weighing "a pounds,
which measured nearly four feet in cir.
conference a ruta baga which weighed
80 pounds, and carrots Is inches long.
The Sacramento (Cal.) BeetSugar
Company last season raised 5000 tons of
beets, which they are now proftably
working up, at the rate of 30 tons per
day. Some of their beets are said to
contain Is per cent. of sugar.
n NEW bhh idliutI bdNSu a Idll
which was choking with potato in its
throat, by bending fence wire, putting
il down the calf's throat, and working
it behind the potato, which he was thus
enabled to draw out
A cows age may be determined by
the teeth, but the horns is. the surest
method. Count the rings around the
horn and add to this number three
years, which is the lapse Of time before
any rings make their appearance.
LoTs of fun has been made Of New
Hampshire land. At one place, they
say, the seed is forced in between the
stones by being discharged from a gun !;
upon another tract Of land mullen.
stalk and two bull.thistles make a
grove and somewhere else the soil is so
poor that you can't raise a disturbance
on il. But Mr.. Goodale, of Lancaster,
has a field which has been moved up.
ward Of sixty.hve years in succession,
and has never borne less than two rons
of hay to the acre. This year il viii
weld two and half.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

A New Epoch IN MEDICAL HIsToRY.--
" Reason and chance says Pliny, " led
10 the discovery of the virtues of me-
dicinal herbs In these modern days,
research and experiment have perfected
the work tbatreason and accident began.
DIR. WALKERS VINEGAR Buffers are the
latest result of botanical investigation
and pharmaceutical science. This ex-
traordinary medicine, composed entirely
of vegetable ingredients culled from the
soil of our Pacific Territory, is pro.
nounced a remedy iof every disease
not organic-of the stomach, the liver,
the bowels the respiratory system, the
kidneys, the muscles, aud the other
organs which make up the machinery of life.
All who have witnessed its effects are in favor
of its universal adoption as the safest and
most reliable tonic known. Free from the
faint of alcohol, it is nevertheless a stimulant
though not a dangerous excitant One thing
Is certain-no curative heretofore introduced
to the public through the press has ever OBJ
tanned, IL so short time, the celebrity of DR..
WALKERS CALIFORNIA VINEGAR BITTERs, or
been supported by such unimpeachable testi-
mony. From that testimony it is evident that
this preparation is a specific for Dyspepsia
Nervous Debility, Intermittent and Bilious
Remittent Feyers, Diarrhea, Dysentnry, Rheu-
matism, Gout, and all disturbances of the
secretive and excretive functions. - Com.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

AN ESSENTIAL OF LONELINESS. To be en-
tirely beautiful the hair should be abundant and
lustrous. This is absolutely essential to complete
loneliness. The most regular features the most brill
liant complexion and pearliest teeth fail Of their du
effect il the hair be thin, dry or harsh. On the con-
trary tho plainest face, tit be but surmounted by
luxurant and sken tresses apt TO impress the be-
holder with a Of &C ual beauty. That browning
ornament OF her sex IS. happily, within the reach of
love " she long ago discovered that LYONs KATuAI.
RON was the sure means of securing IL No prepara-
ton for the hair enjoyed 1.-THE ofts popularity,
and wonder, since IL produces such gratifying
results Applied 10 the waste and barren places OF
the scalp, il frucfes and enriches them with new
and ample growth. IL is not. OF course pretended
that il will do this II the capacity for reproduction is
extinct but long as II remains that wonderful
hahiltant will assuredly propagate the germ OF the
hair into life and actvity-ICom.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
Impure Water i'm Wells.

Many OF the forms of typhus fevers
in cities and villages have been traced
TO impure water in wells. Through inn
perfect drainage, and other means Of
INTRODUCING surface water therein-wa-
ter contaminated with the various de-
caying substances always found, espe.
cially in cities, have always made them
hct.beds of miasma. Bat it is the
farmer that we wish especially to eau.
ton here. Many-nay, nearly all our
population-haye supposed that when
they have dug well, and banked it
sufficiently to prevent surface water
from running directly from the surface,
that they were secure, and that they
must necessarily have pure water; but
such is not the case. The filter event.
ually becomes foul and ceases to act;
and so, often, with the earth about a
well. 1t is simply a natural filter, and
therefore the drainage from the barn.
yard, or other impure sources, passing
under the ground in the line of the
well, must eventually contaminate il.
This may be obvated by undertaking
and this should always be one of the
first operations attended 10, if the water
IN the we'll proceeds from any such
probable source as has been here named.
As fact bearing on this subject, we
may state that out of thirty-six samples
of water sent for examination to DR..
Voelcker, he found many contaminated
with sewerage; and he earnestly invited
attention to the serious injury which
may be produced to health by the use
of such impure water.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

Mrs. PRoDGERs, a London woman, is
separated from her husband. Some.
body left her a legacy of $4,000. and
she sued to have the legacy given up TO
her; but her husband opposed her. and
succeeded in getting the $4,000 for
himself Prodgers doesn't support his
wife or live with her, but robs her ac
cording to English law, with no help
for it.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
A Symmetrical Understanding.

Phelps, Dodge 4 Palmer, manufacturers and
jobters of boots and shoes, As and so Wabash
avenue, make perfect fitting boots ON their
PATENT GLovE-PITTING LAST, such as delight
all purchasers, have complete stock in their
line and fill orders promptly. Ample MEANS
indomitable energy and enterprise, superior
goods and low prices have secured for them a
very large trade in the Northwest 49, Chicago
Tribune.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
the WHEAT FIELD OF AMERICA!
Healthful Climate, Free Homes,
Good Markets.

THE NORTHERN Pacific RAILROAD
offers for sale Lands I'm Central and Western
Minnesota, embracing: |. The best of Wheat
Land q Excellent Timber for the Mill. the Farm
and the Fire; 3. Rich Prairie Pasturage and Natural
Meadow, watered by clear Lakes and running
streamsin healthful Climate. ioere FeUer and Aous
is Unknown.
GRAIN may be shipped hence by lake to market as
cheaply as from Eastern Iowa Central llli1ois.
Cars through tn So lands from Bake Superior
to Dakota: Price land close TO track $500 s. 90
per further away $3.50 to $500. SEVEN YEARS'
CREDIT; Warrantee Deeds; Northern Pacific
7-3O Bonds, now selling par. received for land at
Sll0. No other unoccupied Lands present such adj
yantages to settlers.
SOLDIERS md the New Law (March. ls72l
get 81 acres I REE, near the railroad by one and
two years residence.
TRANSPORTATION AT REDUCED
RATES furnis he'd frcm all principle points East &c
purchasers of Railroad Lands and TO settlers OF
Government Honesteads Purchasers. their wiyet
and children carried free the Northern
Pacific Road. Now is the time for Settlers and Colo
MES to get Railroad Lands and Government Home
steads close to the track.
Send for Pamphlet containing full in formation
map and copy of New Homestead Law. Address
LAND DEPARTMENT, NORTHERN PACIFIC
RAILROAD. ST PAUL, MIMI,
OR 23 FIFTH AY., COR. NINTH ST., NEW YORK
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

The chief exporter of the California
fruit to the East lost $4,000 the first
year he went into business. Last year
he cleared $25, 900, and this year expects
to clear double that amount. The most
profitable shipment of fruit made last
year was to Llverpool-6,000 miles by
steamer and rail. After paying all COM
mission ana freight the fruit yielded a
net profit larger than the value in
Sacramer o.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

CHAPPED HANDS, face, rough skin,
pimples, ring worm, salt-rheum, and other
cutaneous affections, cured, and the skin
made soft and smooth, by using the JUMPER
TAR Soar, made by CAswELL, HAZARD & Co.,
New York II is more convenient and easily
applied than other remedies, avoiding the
trouble Of the greasy compounds now in
use.-[Com.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

a GENTLEMAN in the eastern part of
the State, who was about having his leg ampu-
tated on account of its being bent at right
angles and stiff at the knee, heard of John
sons Anodyne Liniment. After using il
short time his leg became straight, and + now
as serviceable as the other-TCom,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

A GREAT many people have asked us
of late, How do you keep your horse looking
so sleek and glossy?" We tell them it's the
easiest thing in the world give Sheridan's
CaUGl,y Condition Poioders two or three times
week.-(Com.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

"AMoNosT the live and progressive
institutions Of the day is Geo. p. Rowell 4
Co.'S Advertising Agency, No. Al Park Row,
New York The establishment is SO syatema-
tized, and their facilities are 50 ample that the
public is sure Of being served IN the most
complete manner. boston Post
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

THE OLDEST AND THE BEsT.-" Bur.
nett's Superior Flavoring Extracts"
Lemon, Vanilla, Almonds, Rose, Nee
tarine, etc, are strictly Standard"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
PEOPLES CHOLERA REMEDY.
ls4O--FoR OVER Thirty YEARs-ls72.
PERRY DAVIS
PAIN-KILLER

Has been tested in every variety Of climate and by
almost every nation known 10 Americans. 1t is the
constant companion and inestimable friend of the
missionary and the traveller or land. and one
should travel on our lokes or rivers trithout H.
Since the PAIN-KILLER was first introduced and
met with such extensive sale, many Linimens Reliets
Pdndceds and other Remedies have been offered to the
public, but of them have attained the truly
enuidbie standing of the PAIN-KILLER.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

II you want comfort wear the Elm
wood collar.
II you want style wear the Elmwood collar
For sale at all Gents Furnishing Stores.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

J. F. RATHBoNE & Co. Chicago, ILL.,.
wholesale stoves, have just removed to SO and
40 Lake street, a new store 52x150 feet, where
the Albany stoves, such favorites with house
keepers, are sold by the carload or ship-load
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

THERE is no excuse for Door Biscuits,
Rolls, Bread Grddle Cakes, Mullins Waffles.
etc, when Dooley's Yeast Powder is used.
Grocers sell Il. ICON.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

IT is rumored that the heather
Chinee" has secured a fondness for
canned potato bugs that will eventually
result in the thinning out of the pest.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

New JERSEY farmer sold milk at
five cents a quart, and made Sl25 per
COW in the year. He found it a slavish
business.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

CHRISTIAN SHARPE, inventor of the
famous rifle that bears his name, is en-
gagged in the peaceful business of breed
ing trout, az Vernon. Conn.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

AMERICAN green corn is sent during
the season IN quantities to Liverpool by
Atlantic steamers,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

ONE thousand dollars reward is offered
by the proprietor of DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery for medicine that
will equal it in the cure of Bronchitis,
severe Coughs, and the early stages of
Consumption. 6l2
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
WHY Is THIS sel

1t is because DAVIS PAIN-KILLER is what it
claims TO be-a relieyer ofpain.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
REWARD

A pple paror and slcer g. ana 81 Union" Apple
"a parer, 81 Peach Parer 8l5n. Peach Stoner aud
ialvrr 75C Nut Cracker &je. sold by teacrs Manu-.
actured ~ u. II. WnTrEMoRF Worcester. Mass.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
TO
CONSERVATIVES.

CONSERVATIVES.
The advertiser, having been permanently cured of
that dread disease Consumption, by simple remedy
Is anxious to make known to his feOw-suferers the
means Of cure. To all who desire it, he will send
copy Of the prescription used Gree Of charged with
the directions for preparing and using the same
ASTHMA, BRONCHITIS, and all Throat or Lung diff
futies.
Parties wishing the prescription will please address
Rev. EDWARD A. WILSON,
lSi Penn street. " illiamshureh N "
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

When used externally. as Liniment nothing gives
quicker case f. Burns Bruises Sprains, Cuts Stngs
from Insects and Scalds. Ii removes the fire, and
tie woun heals like ordinary sores Those suffering
with Rheumatism, GOut, or Neuralgia, ii not "a posi-
tive cure they find the PAIN-KILLER gives them
relief when no other remedy will. Il 0iUes Instant
Relief from AchiRg Teeth. Every housekeeper should
keep it hand and apply it the first attack of
pain II will give satisfactory relief and save hours
ofsutfering Do not trfe with yourselves by testing
untried remedies. Be you call for and get the
genuine PAIN-kfLLER, as many worthless nostrums
attempted to be sold on the great reputation of
This valuable medicine.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

Hs- Directions accompany each bottle.
Prices % cts, 50 cts. and 81 per bottle.
SOLD BY ALL MEDICINE DEALERS.
For sale by ALL CHICAGO DRUGGIsTs.
NERVOUS STFFERER.-A dose of VEeErINE
takeI just before going to bed. will insure a
com Portable nights rest to the nervous sufferer
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06
Irs MERITS ARE UNSURPASSED.

you are suffering from internal Pain. Tgentg 10
Thirty Drops. Title gater will almost instantly
you There is nothing to equal IL for Collie,
Cramps Spdsnis Heartburn, Diafr hed Dysentefp Fur.
Wind ia Me BotCes Sour Stomach. Dyspepsia and Sick
Headache In sections of the country where FEVER
AND fAGUE prevails. there is no remedy held in
greater esteem. Persons travelling should keen IL by
them. few drops, in water, will prevent sickness
bowel troubles from change Of water,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

Fro m foreign countries the calls for PAIN-KILLER
are great. Ii is found to CURE CHOLERA when all
9th er remedies fail
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1872-09-06

IN Germany, Holland. France or Great Britain, look
after, aud IL possible collected by j. f. FRUEAUFF
Attorney at Law. Columbia Lancaster Co. Pa
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1872-02-06
The Paris nniI de I,Oparn.

Correspondence Of the Boston Advertiser.l
The opera ball is held in the tempora;
ry theater in Rue La Pelletier, a
structure which will be torn down when
the new opera house is opened. if it
does not fall down before. One pays
ten francs entrance fee. On entering
the vestibule one is required to deposit
overcoats, etc., and woe to the thought
less man who, if not in costume, ap-
pears otherwise than in full dress. He
is ANONYMOUSLY expelled from the the
ater, with the loss of his self-respect and
ten francs. Ladies have the choice of
their costume or dominic, but in all
cases they must wear mask. Ladies
with their faces uncovered are forbidden
to enter the theater, but the prohibition
does not seem to extend to any other
part of their person. The hall is very
large, and by the removal Of the stage
is extending to the extreme rear of the
scene, excepting the platform, on which
sits Strauss and his wonderful orchestra.
The music, of course, is superb. Herr
Strauss is an amiable, benevolent look
ing man, who thoroughly enjoys the oc-
casion, and who selects the most volup-
tious waltzes, the sweetest polkas, the
choicest operatic airs. But the noisy
auditory, and the consequest necessity
for loud music, render it somewhat bois-
terous and less pleasing to purely es-
thetic taste. Nevertheless it is grand,
magnificent and almost reconciles one
to the occasion which has brought it
forth.
For five hours from midnight Saturday
until FIVE o'clock Sunday morning,
Herr Strauss is autocrat of the situa-
tion. The soldiers who stand about are
ornamental, but not useful. Even the
floor managers serve no purpose except
to remove occasionally lady" who,
in order to breathe has incautiously
lifted her mask. 1t is Strauss baton
which sways the vast throng, giving the
signal for pause and the resumption
of conversation, or the signal for the
dance with the waving of countless gay
costumes, the clatter of heels, the antics
of men and women throwing themselves,
in desperate spirit of rivalry, into the
jollity of the can-can, into the lively
polka or the lascivious waltz; it is Ger
many again master of France, but it is
Strauss baton instead of Motkes sword
Doubtless there is certain degree of
real spirit in the affair. But the
sincere love of fun has long since disap-
peared. The genuine ladies who visit
the place are only too glad to avail
themselves of the inexorable mask.
They shun the floor and from boxes
peer down on the scene. You may see
some representatives of excellent fami-
lies lending the support of their presence
and their lorgnettes to the dancers; and
if you have sharp eyes you may detect,
half concealed in a conspicuous box,
some elegant American ladies who are
drawn thither by curiosity, and afierward
go home to moralize on the dissolute-
ness of French life. If such moralizing
be a little out of place it is none the less
just. From its original purpose the
opera ball has become mere rendez-
vous where the vilest of women meet
their masculine correlatives.
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1872-02-06

CARRIAGE MANUFACTURERS.
OWEN LILLY-Carriages, farm and spring
Wagons SO Union street.
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1872-02-06
Milo hammered susan.

Susan B. Anthony was on hand at
the Washington gathering of distressed
females few days ago, and when an at
tack was made upon Mrs. Woodruff, this
is what Susan said:
Mrs. Woodruff has been abused, but
not half as much as l have l have
been on the platform for twenty years
as an advocate for equal rights, and
have been scoffed and scerned. You
have killed off women in a moment by
pointing at them the finger of scorn,
but we don't propose to die so easily
now that our cause carries strength. |
don't propose to prescribe any class; /
should gladly welcome all the infamous
women in New York, and sit side by side
with them on this platform, if they were
willing to make speeches in favor of
freedom. Applause. ] They shall
st and by my side-I will be their cham
pion. ! will take by the hand every
prostitute can find who seek to escape
the inequalities Of that law which pla-
ces all womanhood at the mercy Of man
hood. Immense applause. | care
not for the history of any woman any
more than that Of any man who shall
step upon this platform. l want you to
that you can't scare me if
you do others.
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1872-02-06
SEWING MACHINES.
$15 SAVED SIS
TIL Il N Il w
SEWING MACHINES
PRICE, FIFTY DOLLARS.

TIME IMPROVEMENTS MADE ON THE
"Wilson" during the year 1871 have
placed IL at the head Of all competition. and
to-day IL Is without rival. II Is as durable
as steel and iron can make IL. Every Ma
chine of the late OAsE-HARDENED FINISH Is
Warranted i've years, and warrantee
Furnished with each Machine.
The above cut represents the late improved
< Machine, which rests fiat with the table and
runs light and rapidly. and makes the shuttle
or lock stitch. uses straight needle, and the
celebrated uNDER-FEED improved in shape so
as TO have a portion of the feed on both sides
of the needle.
Remember the Fact,
that high prices ION sewing machines) do not
indicate superiority. The combination, the
ring. and the monopoly, all agree on high
prices, which they, sooner or later, Will be
farced TO reduce on account of the unprece-
dented rapid and increasing salos Of the
NEW WILSON SEWING MACHINE.
Please call and examine even If you do not
wish to purchase.
A full stock of Machine Twist Spool, Cot
ton. Oil, Needles, etc., always on hand and
for sale low.
BEACH g. SUTHERLAND,
asa Main street, south of Union.
64-63- xiv