The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1872-08-31
THE PRESS.
SATURDAY MORNING, AUG. 81, 1872
Gossip and Gleanings.

Gossip and Gleanings.
Punch says that mediums who profess to
been entirely baff1ed by the railway time
tables. They have tried them and find that
they don't answer.
A number of people out West are said to be
losing their hair through eating diseased rye,
which gives rise to many rye-bald jokes at
their expense.
A tender hearted Chicago bus driver says
he hates to run over a mamie thinks ii
hurts the springs.
Moving water always possesses a fascinating
interest, and soft-hearted bachelor has dis
covered that there is no form of tie fluid
quite so moving as womans tears.
Solomonian parent in Michigan having
rather spoiled rod than spared his child, the
dutiful little boy laid wait for him with a
shotgun and gave him another sort of charge
to keep.
Lawyers report more divorce cases in the
courts of New York than ever have been
known before at any one time, some of the
litigants being persons of wealth, influence
and position.
Prayer meetings are not very lively now.
People drink so much ice water and eat such
quantities of hard green peaches that they
fail to take hold of the promises.-DanbMy
Ne,ps,
A writer in the rural districts says, "The
boys are flying their kites, collecting postage
stamps, eating green apples and calling the
doctor" Rather diversified employment.
Madame de Stael said, eff 1 were mistress
Of fifty languages, would think in the deep
German, converse in the gay French, write
in the copious English, sing in the majestic
Spanish, deliver in the noble Greek, and
make love in the soft Italian.'
Cider apples bring only ten cents bushel
in Connecticut; and the cider makers say the
barrels will cost more than the cider, this
year.
A Danbury man has an intererting heir
loom in the shape of hat which was worn
through one hundred and eighty-two drunks,
and still retains traces of its former beauty.
The editor of the Griggsville Gazette says
it takes ofcourse, just ten times the power to
turn an honest penny that it takes to turn a
mill.
"Howard Glyndon" announces in water
ing place letter, that she wouldn't have
crimping pins torturing her head of nights if
any one offered her five dollars night for
wearing them. Would she do it for six dol
lars? Nobody wants to be mean about it,
and it is an interesting item of news to put
in letter anyway.
The papers of the West are asking, 'who
is the Rev. Chares W. Dennison9" He is
too well known in Atlantic cities and in
Washington.
The conductors Of Pittsburg street cars are
accustomed to give public notice that they
cannot wait for young ladies to kiss goodbye
when they part.-Rank envy.
A Sunday school teacher who had almost
become discouraged over the listles sness OF
her class, at last felt rewarded by an inter
esting look from a little girl. The reward
was lost when the little creature touched a
bracelet on her arm, and asked: Teacher,
are them thleaded on 'lastic?'
A Connecticut young lady's bad spelling
led to $4,000 breach of promise suit.
Owing to the intense heat, the Missouri
Democrat says it is obliged respectfully tc
file in the archives of the Office, kept fol
safety in the stove, large number of origina
poems.
A milkman is feeding a cow with brar
moistened with rum in the hope of instigat
ing her to yield milk punch.
A misanthropc editor of Western paper
announces: ''The clock of our Court House
emulating the example of some of our ladies,
had nice coat of paint yesterday"
A physician examining student as to his
progress, asked him, ''Should man fall into
his well forty feet deep, and strike his head
against one Of his tools with which he hsd
been diggiag, what would be your course il
called in as surgeons" The student re-
lie and fill up the welI.''