Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1872-10-04

because good for nothing-had been
found in recent possession of carcas
Of mutton, which the owner had left
hanging out over night, and which
NON satitinventatm' that is to say, ''turn.
ed up missing" in the morning.
/ 81 drafted the indictment with great
care, charging, with painful particu.
larity, that one William Dawkes, yeo-
man, not having the fear, ETC., but mov-
ed and seduced by certain parsonage
whom it was then common to include
in every indictment as an ''accessory
before the fact" on etc., at etc., one
carcass of mutton Of the value, etc., of
the goods, chattels and personal pro-
perty of the Pelatiah Potts, out of the
possession, and against the will of the
said Pelatiah, feloniously, and with
force of arms, did steal, take and car
ry away.
"sWhat's the NATTER asked sharp
ly, when my friend Bob G. burst out
laughing on hearing me read over this,
my first professional production.
"'It's the best joke of the season!
said Bob, with another guffaw.
"'What is?"
"Why, that pun-calling a sheep
thief a yeoman.'
"My office was scene of confusion
at the end of five minutes. Bob's head
had gone through the glass door of my
bookcase; two of my three chairs lay
with broken legs; and Bob and I had
a pair Of black eyes between us. 1t
was more than month before either
spoke to the other.
'But I'm wandering from the point.
"In due time the prisoner was brought
up for trial, Old Polifox appearing for
the defence.
'Old P. was character. The only
law book he had ever read was Swans
Treatise for Justices of the Peace;' but
in that, and the Scriptures, he was pow
erful. He had way of quoting and
applying the latter which, in religi-
Gus community, made it difficult to op-
pose him without incurring suspicion
of orthodoxy. His forte lay in carry
ing the jury, whom he generally sue
ceeded in convincing that he and they
were on one side, and his adversary on
the other. His style and gramme1
were original.
81 had set my heart on winning that
case. If I could only lbesasssld Polifaz
before a jury, my cap would be feather
ed.
81 had carefully written out my
Fopening;' and when read it over to
Nellie Wynne, to whom I was paying
attention at the time, she said it was
real nice, which, [ knew, was feminine
for Ebullyp-an encomium [ felt not a
little proud of.
"When the case came on, I spoke my
piece Withouta blunder. Icited many
authorities to prove that he in whose
possession stolen property is found soon
after the theft, is in law, presumed to
be the thief. Twas prepared to prove,
| said, that the property in question
had disappeared at the dead hour OF
night, when all honest people were in
their beds, and had been found, at ear
ly dawn, in the smoke-house of Dawkes,
the defendant.
81 put my witness on the stand, and
proved the ownership, value and iden-
tity of the property, its mysterious dis
appearance and subsequent reappear-
ance in the constructive possession OF
the prisoner, and rested.
"Old POLLOK sat in solemn silence,
his eyes closed, and his red bandana
over his head. He asked no questions.
and called no witnesses. was disap-
pointed at the old fellows giving in
so easily. It would take away half the
glory of my triumph.
"But [ was reckoning without my
host.
cold POLLOK slowly got upon his
legs, and removing his bandana, and
taking up the Bible on which the clerk
had sworn the witnesses, began:
"1 am grieved, my breethering'-he
always called the jury his Fbreethering'
Il am grieved and sore amazed to
hear such heathenlsh doctrines in a
Christian courthouse as we've jest been
a listenin' to. What sez the sakred
volume [ hold in my hand? Why, ii
sez, AT the mouth Of two witnesses
let every matter be established Now.
my breethering let me ask what two
witnesses-what one witness seed my
client hook this sheep? Echo answers
Mary one!' My delooded young bro
ther has read profane authors to show
that fndin' Of goods on the wrong
mans primises is proof of his stealin'
of 'em. It's presumption of law he
says, and a great piece Of presumption
it is, my breetherin'. Now, in this
same sakred volume, we have narrated
a case in pint-that of one Benjamin,
which you all hearn about. A silver
cup, wuth hundred times this trum-