Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1872-07-12

"'dood, now says he, that critter'll
pay the deacon off lively, pretty SOON
"The deacon bobbed his head spell,
and old Dick he shook his horns and
stamped at him sort o. threatenin'. FL
nally the deacon he give great bow and
brought his head right down at him, and
old Dick he sot out full tilt and come
down on him ker chunk, and knocked
him head over heels into the broad AISLE
and his wig flew one way and he tother,
and Dick made lunge at 1t as it flew,
and carried it off on his horns.
oval, you may believe that broke up
the meetin' for one while, for Parson
Morrel laughed out, and all the gals and
boys they stomped and roared, and the
old deacon he got up and begun rubbing
his shins-'cause he didn't see the joke
ont.
"'You don't orter laugh, says he, it's
no laughing matter--it's a solemn thing
says he. L might have been sent into
'tarnity by that darned crittur, says he.
Then they all roared and haw-hawed the
more to see the deacon dancin' round
with his little shiny head, so smooth a fly
would trip up ont. L believe, my soul,
you'd laugh to see me in my grave, says
he
oval, the truth ont was, twas list one
of them Dustin up times that natur has,
when there ant nothin' for it but to give
in, twas Jest like the ice breakin' up in
the Charles Rivsr-it all come at once and
no whoa to t. Sunday or no Sunday, sin
or no sin, the most on 'em laughed till
they cried, and couldn't help it.
But the deacon he went home feelin'
pretty sore about it. Lem Sudoc he
picked up his wig and handed it to him.
Says he, old, Dick was playing tithing-
man, want he, deacon? Teach you to
make allowance for other folks that get
sleepy
"Then Mrs. Titkins she went over to
Aunt Jerushy Scran's and Aunt Polly
Hokun's, and they had pot o. tea over
it, and greed it was awful of Parson Nor
rel to set sich an example. and suthin' had
got to be done about it. Miss Hokun said
she alters knew that Parson Morrel hadn't
no spiritooality, and now it had broke
out into open sin, and led all the rest of
'em into it, and Mrs. Titkins she said
such man want fit to preach, and Miss
Hokun said she couldn't never hear him
ag'in, and the next Sunday the deacon
and his wife they hitched up and driv
eight miles over to Parson Lothrop's and
took Aunt Holly on the back seat.
"Wall, the thing growed and growed,
till it seemed as if there warn't nothin
else talked about cause Aunt Polly and
Miss Titkins and Jerushy Scran they
didn't do nothin' but talk about it, and
that set everybody else a talkin'
Finally, it was greed they must hey'
counsel to settle the hash. So all the
wimmen they went to chopping mince,
and making up punkin pies and cram
berry tarts, and b'ilin' doughnuts, gettin'
ready for the ministers and delegates
cause counsels always eats pOwerful-and
they had quite stir, like a gineral train
in The hosses, they was hitched all up
and down the stalls, a-stompin' and swift
chin their tails, and all the wimmen
was a-talkin, and they he'd up everybody
Morrel he says: Brethren says he,
jest let me tell you the story jest as it
happened, and if you don't every one of
you laugh as hard as l did, why, then,
III give up
THE parson he was mastcr-hand at
settin' Off story, and afcre he'd done, he
got 'em all in sich roar they didn't know
where to leave off. Finally, they give
sentence that there hadn't no temptation
took him but such as is common to man;
but they advised him afterward alters to
pray with his eyes shet, and the parson
he confessed he orter "a done it, and
meant to do better in future, and so they
settled it.
$50, boys" said Sam, who always drew
a moral, Eye see it Farms you you must
take care what ye look at, eff ye want to
keep from laughin' in meetin' '."-Chris
| tan Union.