American citizen. [volume] (Canton, Miss.) 1864-1890, 1872-09-28

And hot the tears starting.
What joy, that life can give, is half
So sweet as love s first parting?
Atlantic for October
MIR. TWITCHELL'S INVENTIONS.
s.Mandy, where can 1 find clean
hirt 80
Mrs. Twitchells popgm reply was not
at all nerve-calming: ''Down in the cellar,
or up i'm the attic, or under the bed, or in
the parlOr on the center-table."
Mrs. Twitchell continued the popping !:
"You always ask that question. as if l
were in the habit of hiding your shirts
from you, or as if l had no system or
order, so that your shirts might be here
and there, and anywhere and everywhere.
Your shirts have never, since the day we
were married, been put anywhere but in
the second drawer of the mahogany
bureau; and l have told you so thousand
times"
In the meantime Mr.. Twitchell had
been salmtering awkwardly and uneasily
between the washstand and the bureau.
Catching at the Information of his wife's
words, he hastily opened drawer, and
stood gazing with helpless, bewildered
air into the profound of laces, rutfies and
ribbons. Beyond the laces and ruffies
Mr.. Twitchell caught sight OF sleeve !:
that must be the shirt! Cautiously he
advanced his fingers. You would have
thought he was getting ready to snatch
something from fiery furnace. Through
the halfopened drawer the awkward hand
soon emerged dragging by one sleeve
Mrs. Twitchell's white muslin waist, and
with it laces, ribbons and ruffies.
Now was the wife's opportunity:
''.rhere you clumsy creature you've
done it now!'' sect away blunderer:
there's no use trying to teach you any
thing. You are as helpless as the baby.
and give ten times more bother. If you'd
got into this drawer and danced, you
couldn't have done more mischief. This
is my drawer: your shirts have never,
since the creation, been in this drawer"
'.Well now, Mandy. I'm sure you said
in the second drawer"
''Of the mahogany" (syllablcs pro-
nounced staecato) ''bureau. Look at this
bureau: is it mahogany? l dare say you
never knew before that it's Walnut
Mr. Twitchell was whipped, but he ac-
cepted his defeat good-humoredly, for he
had some good news which he was as
anxious to get rid of as of his damp clothes.
''Oh come Mandy" he said, coaxingly.
''get my shirt for me-
.Why can't you get it 20 asked the wife,
turning her sharp brown eyes upon him.
''YOu are sitting there doing nothing.
You expect me to do the sewing of the
family, and take care of the children and
house, and wait on you besides. I've
spoiled you: I've just made slave OF
myself for you; and you-you can't do
little errand for me-"
''Why my dear, am always ready to
do anything for you"
at looks so. Why couldn't you send
me that salt, as asked you to! Here l
was waiting and waiting for it: got the
cream all ready, paid a quarter for
quart of cream, and got it into the freezer,
and then waited and waited for the salt.
hoy i haf Srrnf ca,
shiftless, so unreliable, to promise thing
and then not do it! I'm a woman of my
word. If promise thing, I'll do it, or
die trying; but you
81 forgot the salt, own, for was alb
sorbed-''
''Yes, that's it: you're ALWAYS absorb
cd. If you'd get unabsorbed, and mix
more with people, and make yourself
more popular: your family might be
obliged to you."
''Don't fret yourself, my dear: your
good-for-nothing husband will yet make a
living for you I've just invented some
thing that'Ii make our fortunes. DIR. Hol-
lister says its worth hundred thousand
dollars TO me-. He's delighted with it,
Mrs. Twitchell's chair stopped rocking:
her hands and work dropped in her lap /:
she looked at her husband with astonish-
ed and eager eyes. Invented some
thing! What?''
1--we invented pump, which intend
to call the Rural Fountain or the Per-
petual Stock ountain'-I haven't decided
which,"
:. Is that ALL 90 Mrs. Twitchell was dis
appointed.
"'All!' Wait till you hear about it.
he produced a card from his pocket and
began explaining the diagram.
'.Well, what do you think of it?''
81 don't think Iquite understand it..
sob, women have no heads for machin-
cry; n woman never invented anything"
Three months after this Mr.. Twitchell
came home with a fOrmidablc-lOOking doc
ument.
'sThey have denied me patent" he
said abruptly.
Mrs. Twitchell dropped her dishcloth
as suddenly as though a cannOn-ball had
taken offbOth her arms she gaZed in stu
pefaction at her husband; What a loss
what loss "a hundred thousand dollars,
What shall we do:''
s'Well, dear. never cry over split milk,
but find my slippers for me-
II can't spend my time waiting on you;
I've got to work now harder than ever -
and she picked up the forgotten dish
towel from the floor.
swell, I've got another inventiOn-One
that will pay. I've got a certain thing
on this
Mrs. Twitchelrs hopes went up to a sur
prising height, considering that she was
practical woman.
Its f1y-trap-the simplest and most
ingenious thing, Doctor HOLSTER says,
that he has ever SEEM
''But perhaps you'll fail to get patent
on it,
..Hollister says there's no doubt about
the patent; he's already making out the
application. HOtchkiss is manufacture
ing some samples, and 1 mean to start
right out to selling them and to selling
rights. I'll bring you one tomorrow, and
you'll soon clear the whole house of
fiies.''
The next morning a fy-trap was set
on Mrs. TwitchelFs kitchen table, much
TO baby's delight, and Sissy was set to
tend ii.
'sYou needn't expect to make any for
tune on that fly-trap," said Mrs. Twitch-
ell that day. ats caught only three flies
this whole day, and the baby has poled
INV sleeve-buttOns into it, so that you'll
have to take it all to pieces to get them
out"
I'm glad found it out before apply
ing Tor patent,'' said the inventor the
next day. ut do7s't catch the flies"