The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1872-07-05

TAXING IN SAIL-A mock auction.
Two porcupi1es make prickly pair
Do fittings render garments musical!
SErH GREEN matched 100000 young
shad last year.
MAINE factories are doing large busi-
ness in canning loSsters.
CHARLES FRANCIS ADAMS is not a
Mason, and never was.
ONLY eighteen of the first Napoleon's
veterans are left.
WIEN is an umbrella like a cooks
perquisites? When it is dipping.
wHAr is the difference between a
Christian and cannibal? The one en-.
joys himself, and the other enjoys other
people.
A GENTLEMAN who was buying a watch
10 replace one that had been stolen
from him, remarked that he was "mak-
ing up for lost time"
FRANK LESLIE is nom de plume. The
man who wears it used to be Henry
Carter, and his name was changed by
the Legislature.
BETTER than a circus it would be to
watch foreigner, who attempted to
study up and translate our language
with the aid of a dictionary, who used
as his subject report Of base ball
match.
BEFORE hanging man in Louisiana
they let from fifteen to forty newspaper
reporters interview him for three weeks.
The poor fellow is then not only willing
but anxious to be hung.
A LADY teacher in an Iowa school
lately punished boy for kissing the
big girls by making him stand up before
all the scholars and show how it was
done. She found this policy wouldn't
work. The boys thought it capital pun
ishment, and it had to be abolished.
The Wyoming Journal publishes the
following in its advertisement rates:
Fees for marriage notices a. high as
the ecstacy and liberality of the bride
groom may prompt"
LAZY California bartenders place the
ingredients of cobbler into tumbler,
and then wait for an earthquake to mix
them up.
SINCE the San Francisco authorities
have offered premium of so for every
dead body recovered from the bay,
the Chronicle advises drunkards and
Oregon fats to give a wide berth to the
waterfront. Ten dollars, it says, may
seem q small sum for murder, but times
are hard and human nature weak.
AN epitaph on North Carolina mule
runs as follows:
Here lies . mule. blind - . bss;
The more corn you'd give him the less hid grow
He beicnesd to the bumpers Of old Bill shsr man.
And mules like this. We ell NY durn 'em."
A CALIFORNIA obituary "The de-
ceased was q talented man of romantic
nature. He placed the butt of his gun
in the FIRE while he looked down the
muzzls and departed hence sponta
neously."
Mrs. EMERY, of Indiana, warns all
women against her tickle, faithless hus-
band, who has deserted her. She says
he may be recognized by broken nose,
which she demolished with skillet.
TEAcHER-What bird did Noah send
out of the ark? Smallest boy in the
class latter q pause)-A dove, sir.
Teacher-very well. But should have
thought some of you big boys would
have known that Tall Pupil-Please.
sir, that boy ought to know, sir, cause
his fathers bird ketcher, sir
AxERrcAS LADIES MoBBED IN EDrN-
BuRGH.-On Sunday evening three Is
dies from America left the Royal Hotel.
about 8 o'clock, to see
Holyrood Palace. They went on foot
without escort, and returned by the
Canongate and High street. Here their
hesitation as to the route, their fashion
able attire. and the lateness of the
hour, it being nearly o'clock. attracted
The notice of some idlers, who followed
Them up the street. At the north bridge
The listeners to . street preacher Joined
in the crowd, making up q considerable
mob. No noise was made or violence
offer ed, and two policemen escorted the
aides till cab could be procured. The
aides were then driven TO their hotel,
,ut tn crowd hung about for some
lime. Yesterday the two senior magls'
rates, after causing strict investiga.
son to be made, called At the hotel, ana
ound that two of the ladies had LETT
own, but they were satisfied the mob
had been attracted by their unusuala P
,earance in the locality at 30 late an
,our, and that no insult was intended.
London Times, June 3.