The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1872-02-22
SUBJECT TO FITS.
By JUBILEE JINKs.


By JUBILEE JINKs. ,r
~ JE;iG ,ii-- yt,te-' =
Last season was travelling in the mining
districts of Nevada, and stopped for the night
in alittle, greasy tavern in one OF those settle
ments that so rapidly spring up in the West,
where civilization, in all its primitive unloveli-
ness stares you in the face; dusty roads, log
cabins unchinkets and without windows with
every door and crevice o peephole for tow
headed. freckle-faced children, and as many
dogs yelping at your heels as there are mem.
bers of q family; jar bugs making the air ring
with their mon0tonous muHlc bats whirllng IN
their cratic flights, and mosquitoes filling your
ears, mouth and nose.
Such was my reception at Scrabbletown, and
the landlord of the little tavern could offer me
scarcely any better.
He said he could give me my supper and
feed my horse, and tie him TO rack in the
barn yard, at my risk, but not bed was to be
had could roll me up in blanket on the bar:
room floor, for iseyehty-fve cents. What a
horrible prospect that was, as looked into the
filthy place, reeking with the fumes of poor to-
bacco and mean whiskey, dismal in the light OF
its tallow candles, and made shocking by the
oaths of it's noisy card-players.
After supper [ took the landlord aside, and
slipped an extra greenback in his hand, and
the effect was marvellous; be went off on @
search, and came back informing me that he
could put me in a room with another man.
every we'll, don't object" ," said I, as he led
the way by the light of q miserable tallow dip,
which he left with me to light me to bed.
Isurveyed the7room, and particularly my
bedfellow. He was q mild-looking man, L
thought-perhaps class-leader IN some prim-
tive church near by. His repose was SO quiet
and childlike that 1 thought we would sleep
peacefully together for the night; but before /
had blown rout the Light he opened. up snore
that seemed like cross between filing saw
and saving board, and my feelings at once
became malicious toward him.
blew out the light and turned in, and still
the snore continued. The moon had now risen,
making every object visible in the room.
L hunched my friend, and, as his eyes opened
with snap, he said:
HBy jingo hoWIyou scared me, Mister You
going to sleep here to-night?"
EYES,"
'eWell, Tm mighty glad of it. Ialways like
company It's kinder lonesome to sleep all
"Yes, so it is. Pardon me for waking you,
but thought. it my duty to tell you some
times have fits"
"What, fts9 You don't say so, Mister
eyes, do, am not particularly danger
GUS, but bite sometimes; so be careful that l
don't get my teeth into you"
1"Well, I'll be doggoned |! Ihope you won't
have Ss any ny fits" its 80
81 hope, Mister, you won't bite me if you do
have any fits" tf t"
20, hope not" - - #1
He drew long breath, and then.said: i9'
"Well, am afraid won't sleep any to-
night, ,,,, g,oy a,... -
,t.Bnt how am / to know when yon are going
to have fts7' gilo ~.
10, Igroan, and breathe hard, and foam at
the mouth and when you hear me snap my
teeth like a dog, then you'd better look out"
"Well, I'm darned If I amt sorry, Mister,
YOU come in here. I'm afraid you'll be more
company than want"
=, 30; don't be uneasy:;;j i sometimes do, not
have any for months. Let's go to Sleep" and
pretended to drop off in peaceful slumber.
NY companion. and tumbled about un-
easily for some time; then dropped into rest
less sleep, and soon commenced that old snore,
lust where he left, off when, I woke him up
That decided me upon having fit, and, with a
fearful snore, and horrible groaning, set my
nails into his arms and my teeth into his shoul-
1er. lust hard enough to nip nicely, but it was
enough for the purpose. With terrified yell
he sprang from the bed, and went flying down
stairs, e1claiming:
so, Lordy, he's got fits; he's got fits He's
bit piece out of my shoulder P'
The landlord, with crowd from the bar
room, came hurrying up and found me just re-
covering from the effects Of the fit, and, giving
me hot toddy from his own private bottle, he
left me. He carried with him the clothing of
my bedfellow, who had turned in, in blanket
down stairs, resolved tobe bitten no more by
men having fits.
1t was delicious to have the whole bed to
myself, and I luxuriated in it by stretching my
self entirely across it. had soon dropped in
to slumber, peaceful and innocent as my
childhood, when was aroused by some one
roughly shaking my shoulder and saying
"Wake up, stranger, and move over. Half
this beds mine."
opened my eyes on six feet teamste-, who
was pulling off his rough boots. A rough look
ing specimen he was but he annoyed me most
by taking up two-thirds of the bed and crowd
ing me to the wall. concluded to try another
fit, and said:
"My friend?"
30, shut up your trap, Pm sleepy"
''But thought I'd tell you that have fits. !"
"Well, fit away, so you don't wake me-"
"But bite when have them."
"You doY"
eyes"
"WeH, bite the bed.post, then"
Now, this ought to have convinced me that
he was the wrong customer, but it didn't; and,
waiting until he was sound asleep, like a fool,
I bucked in, and set my teeth and nails into
him in splendid style, while l groaned fearful
ly. 1t was the best fit I had ever had, perfect
success on my part, but the way that chap
jumped out of bed and mauled me around the
room was the most perfect success in pugilistic
treatment had ever experienced. He brought
me out of that fit. He cured me of it. 1 don't
think I'll ever have another; but didn't like
his medicine. My eyes all blacked up, my
nose bloody, lip split open, one ear fattened to
my head, my shirt front all torn off, and, to
make the matter worse, the fellow Was asleep in