Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1872-06-08


hesiiancy "a stating tiai rusrg ths allshoi.ol
male aduiis q this si;y the very osmmon sum
rner beverage known ~ soia water and
which is dealt ouiso unsparingly a every cor
ner during ibs heated term. is considered, %
use their own Language. a thiu drink But
while the Ingenious mixture of wind I'D va
ter is termed ",lin, strong liquors, such az
whiskies, arc altogether too thick" for "a sica-
dy warm weather drink aud 50 tie imbibcr
who must moisien lis flues With some liquid
refreshment seeks a pleasant combination Of
the two classes Of drink, which forms happy
combination that exhilarates yet is not intoxi-
eating. 1t is customary among these bibulous
so-betweens TO enter drug store, call for soda
water, name their syrup, at the same time CIV
ing wink to the dispenser OF "slush," who
takes the goblet, in which be places the syrup
then stoops down beneath the counter or re-
tires to a back room where by some chemical
change. the con tents are colored darkly and
the soda is then let in upon the mixture, which
is handed to the customer with wink from
the clerk. So much for the process now for
the sequel.
Saturday a venerable gentleman from the
country, who is a respected church deacon,
Justice of tue peace, member Of tho Band
Of Hope" and a Good Templar in his native
village came TO tho city to trade little in dry
goods, and pu rchase such agricultural imple-
ments as he needed to plant and cultivate his
spring crops The Deacon is strictly temper
ate, and never looks upon the wine when Il IS
rcd, any more than be does when it is any 9TH
er color. Unfortunately, an old friend had
suffered from opthalrnia IN his early days
which left him with an optical popularity
which causes his left upper eyeld to drop
every few seconds, and which, to those not IA
miliar with his infrmity, gave him the appear
ance of winking intentionally.
The Deac" is passionately fond of soda wa
ter, and such light beverages. He loves to feel
the gaseous compound cOursing down his sthrOat
and creating internal connections, and ty-
phoons, that, however endurablo by older per
sons, throw babes into agony and require
prompt doses Of peppermint, so Saturday, after
be had bought few shovel plows, hoes, rakcs
and threshipg machines. also Dolly Warden
for his wife, he thought he would fill up with
soda water and drive on towards home. He
entered drug store, inquired the price Of tho
desired rofreshment then deposited his scrip
and awaited lis mixture.
"What syrup do you want =" said the ur-
bano clerk, as be mopped off tho marble coun-
ter with the same towel he used moment be-
fore to remove the honest sweat from his brow.
"Oh give me sassaparilly; that is about as
healthy as anything, l guess" Here tho
doacon's oyolid went back on him and dropped
quickly
"All right replied the fountain tender, as
he Disappeared below the counter aud came
I'D moment later with tho drinking glass
containing about three fingers OF "Sassaparil-
ly," to which he added the other ingredients
and handed it to the deacon. The latter drain
ed the contents to the very dregs, then
brushon the fToth from bis mouth,
smacked his lips and said, That syrup is a
lsetle stronger than they generally make it,
but my blood Is out of order and guess I'll
take another glass" at the same time bis eye
lid duttercd meaningly as before.
The dose was repeated, and the soda water
bbber left tho store. About half an hour la
ter be entered another establishment where
sign announced Soda and Mineral Waters
on Draught." twas noticed the deacon walked
as if be had the string halt as he entered the
do3r, aud his spectacles were upside down on
his nose. lie called for " Congress Water" at
this place, saying ho didn't feel quite right,
and was afraid he had used too much syrup 10
his soda water at the other store, or elso he
was bilious" His optical weakness exhibited
itself as he spoke and returning the wink, the
clerk retired to a dark closet, then returning
filled up glass with plain Congress and
gave /, to our now tishtually slight" friend,
who swallowed it without murmur.
How many sodas " the Deacon stored away
before be left tho city we are unable to say
but he was found late in the day asleep in his
wagon with plow-poiu: for a pillow, and sew
eral yards Of Dolly Warden calico gracefully
drapod about his person as a covering. lie
revived sufficiently to inform a stranger that
he had been, druggeJ," and a subsequent
visit to tie localities where he had taken soda
water, developed the fact that his unfortunate
habit Of ~inking-a defect ever which be bad
no control-was the cause Of all his trouble
The soda water dispensers supposed him to
be one Of the boys and every time bis eye
lid dropped took the hint The Deacon es-
capped the " Tmjams," but says hereafter he will
" wear a binder" over that eye when he pur-
chases summer drinks, or else write bis order
on slate.
There was always something irresestbly
A. II ef.o