Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes Co., O. [Ohio]) 1870-1895, 1872-10-31
MLLERsBURG HOLMES County, O., THURSDAY OoT 81, 1872

aimed right, but l must say it's took
Won a mighty long spell. You've
skeered Betsey Maria into the hydro
phoby fits, and poor little Jim he's
afeared to git out from under the bed
after dark, and one night he staid down
suller; but I'm done, I'll not stand it
another mint. told Betsy Maria I'd
put stop to it, or perish"
Madam, you are greatly mistaken,
| am taking an observation of the Great
Bear"
$50 you've got bear, have you :
Well, great or little, I'll fix him. Take
that thing down and be of, or I'll be
the death Of you, and the bear too"
Madam, must decline"
"Ill make you decline, and your gun
too. I'll spike it," and suiting the ac-
ton to the word, she thrust the broom
stick into the muzzle of the telescope.
This was too much. Stark seized her
by the arm to give her shake but it
was an unlucky movement for him. She
closed with him, and in two minutes he
lay prone OH the ground and the wild
ow was sitting on his stomach, and as
he had eaten hearty supper of boiled
tripe, the sensation produced by the
weight was anything but agreeable.
"Let me up.' he cried, "or I'll have
you put in the State Prison."
"Oh, you will? will ye? Well, jest
suppose you. do it now. Why don't ye,
eh?" and she flOurished the broom
stick.
"Oh, good woman, oh, let me up. I'll
keep it all close, and my telescope shall
never bother you again"
"On your hOnor?" '-.
Yes, yes, on anything"
Mrs. Glassmer arose, and Mr.. Stark
seizing his telescope, fled for home at
the top of his speed.
The next day he went to the city and
got his glass repaired, and the next
thing he did was to find a proper place
to locate it. He did not dare to go to
any of the hills again, for fear there
might be more than one Widow Glass
mer in the vicinity. A few rods back
of Mrs. Parker's barn was tall hay
cart elevated on very tall pair of
wheels, and across the top of this cart
he put a few boards, raised his telescope
upon them, and congratulated himself
on his capital observatory. One night
he was upon his perch gazing intently
at the heavens. He thought he had dis
covered a new planet in the vicinity of
Pallas. So absorbed was lie in the re-
search that he did not observe that Job
SWEET, Mrs. Parker's hired man, had
hitclied a yoke OF oxen to the cart, and
was driving slowly towards the barn.
"Geod heavens." cried Stark, ''what
a change in the solar system. Can it
be that the planets have lost their grav-
itation? There is great revolution! +!
increased velocity of mo-
ton! Ten billions of miles il minute
Jupiter. who ever saw the like?"
through the glass. 'Shakes
the whole world too! the earth, mean
can hardly keep my feet"
At that instant there was mighty
the cart was going into the
barn by the great doors, and simultane-
ously there was Il Grassland the tele-
scope and astronomer were knocked
regions of space, and then to-
tai darkness reigned.
Mahometr' cried Stark, rubbing
his shoulder. at must have been a
comet! They are substantial bodies
after all, then: SO the earth's been de-
stroyed by comet. Won't the Advents
crow? must be in the regions of
darkness around the orbit of the earth. |
But am on something solid, and
smell something just like a hog pen.
Where am I!'' .............. .....-.....,
"On the manure heap"' yelled Job
SWEET, who was something of wag.
i" say, what about the comet ?" ''-
Poor Stark gathered himself up, and
went into the house to bed. atd-
i But the story got wind, and Rawdon
became too hot for him. He could not
go outside the door but the little boys
would ask him If he had seen the comet
and one day he settled his bill and left
the place.