The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1872-11-22
EBENSBURG PA, FRIDAY, NOVEMBER %, 1879.

Henry. The cook where | stop has auburn
hair. She fell in love with me and sent me
a lock of hair beautifully enclosed in hash.
| stepped into a church. / badn It my
good clothes on, 50 the sexton gave me the
best seat in the house that Is, in case OF
fire it was the best seat in the house, be-
cause it was next to the door. i divine
was preaching. He wears 4 shirt collar so
high that his wife has to let his Gunner
down with fish line He shouted, The
Pilgrim Fathers, where are they? three
times and there the folks sat and couldn't
tell Liza where the Pilgrim Fathers are one
time. | was stranger OF would have
yelled out, ''All dead, every daTned enc OF
EN-. got disguised and left.
When first gazed upon the Connecticut
river ! was struck with fear. 1t Is fresh
stream, but ten cents worth of salt would
make it all right to grow crabs. met
regular old dint-lOcl Puritan down by the
river. lie looked rs though he might have
come over IN the May Flower, OF barrel
of -four. and he told me how The Connecti-
cut river was started lie called it
ATEGEND.
Away up in New Hampshire, a long
time sincely, dwelt a maiden squaw
" hen she got over squawking and growed
UP, she was as graceful as an oyster, and
her steps was as elastic as a gumiurubber
shoe. Her eyes sparl1ed like drops cf dew
III the morning sunlight; her breath was
like the perfume of forest flowers and her
nose was like a figure fourua fire engine.
Her hair was black as an hour after mid
night, and her voice was like the music of
running waters. There wasn't brook
that could begin to babble as swectly rs
she could babble, and her name was Wonita
zone eater. She was reared among shag-
barks and dogbarks. Her arithmetic was
the golden-headed studs that hold up the
blue sky, and her geography was Tie hills
and dalee, the Iills and tie rivulets. She
could not have spelt Coustantinople if you
had given her whole custard pie to do so.
Reuben Fem was a mighty hunter and
when far from home he wore fyus He
cOuldn'ts COnstantinople either. ! hus
Reuben and Wonita seemed formed to be
hitched. He was skilled in trapping deer
and he trapped that dear, and where RGhe
sighed for his dear, the winds have si.h,d
ever since. He uarrird Wonita and * on
ita married kube.
With a three legged camp stool, coal
scuttle, and a second hand awning. they
went to housekeeping and we've happy.
Rabe's aboriginal father ill-law loved the
great spirit, whiskey, and one day Wonta'S
pop got cOrned ; then he was pop corned,
and he took = repeating Thomas hawk and
combed Rul e 5 hair with it, and isuGe was
gathered to his fathers. Nonita wept, and
the tears rolled down into the valley and
grew into q flood that rolled IL q mighty
volume that all the calfs}siu II The country
could not bind, onward to the home of the
lobster and the clam, the oyster and the
crab. And Wonita died a,G ,-as gathered
to her mothers /; and thus tEe Connecticut
became a stream those tc""s did It all.
I}ube left one progeny, itsNeaS a he one,
and they gave him no Taregoric III his
| childhood, and he grew to be mighty
warrior and went cunning. shO ting cents
off from forked sticks until he died and
was gathered to his grandmotherS. And
to this day where Rueben ailem' TO Won
ita grows the hemloc!., and where WoDita
pined for Reuben grows the pine tree, and
all is lovely aud the goose hangs high.
Ruhe was gathered to his fathers, Wonita
to her mothers, and progeny to his grand
mother. Finis.
| thanked the Puritan for his legend,
and told him if he ever came to New York
he must call at The corner of Ann and
West thirty-second street with his family
! and spend week with me, and he said lie
would.
l wouldn't advise people innoderate cir
cumstances to visit Hartford. because there
are only six shiIhngs to the dollar there
and in New York there are eight. Up
there. if fellow has dollar and sperds
six shilling lie is broke, while in New York
! he can spend six shillirgsan have quar-
ter left. Gum Boo.