Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1872-04-02
FACTS AND FANCIES.

f. G. Davenport of the fourth district
| Cumberland county, and E. s. AlsbroOk
Of the town of COOpertown, Robertson
county, were commissioned Justices of the
Peace yesterday.
A gentleman while going down College
street fell into cellar, and received a severe
blow on the head. Cellars should not be
left open at night.
One of the city officers is supposed ID
carry twisted sausages in his pocket. Some
! say they are sweet potatoes, but have a
strange look. How is that?
A pOetical grammar, with rhymes in the
''MOther Goose style, might aid children
to become familiar with the absurdities OF
! our language. Some of the newspapers
seem to be making the attempt to compose
one. The folio wing stanzas are sample:
Remember, though box
In the plural makes boxes,
The plural of OK
Should be oxen, not 'oXes.'
"And remember, though fleece
In the plural is feeCes,
That the plural of goose
Isn't 'gOOses,' nor 'geeses
"And remember. though house
In the plural is houses,
The plural of mouse
OuuulN NC lniNts anu AOI ulOuoCo
Or the last statement should be present
ed in the following metre:
s'AOuse, it is true,
In the plural is mice;
But the plural of house
Should be houses, not 'hice.'
The Danbury NelCS says: ga Danbury
gentleman who went up to Falls Village
-y-;tI, - ,,;ouy 70 oaffiD0 tharo hos refrrDaJ
discouraged. He says the soil is so poor
that the people give concerts for its benefit.
A venerable hen of our acquaintance,
says the Camden (Ark).,) Journal, after
six weeks Of arduOus and unremitting effort,
Matched fourteen turkeys and two ducks
from one eggplant and four onion sets.
A Troy paper recently printed two articles
one of which was an obituary notice and
the other funny anecdote. The headings
accidently got changed, and when the paper
appeared the editor was Mortified to see the
obituary notice headed, ga Good Joke"
while the funny anecdote was prefixed with
the caption, ga Sad Announcement"
A Western female who was thrown into
a high state of enthusiasm from the refusal
of her husband to devote his weeks salary
to the purchase of ODDLY Varden," slew
their only 10y Will i'll dAC'
A love-sck swain, in order to more fully
discover the mind of his "lady-love," closed
a letter with the following lines:
eff you was a dog.
And was hog.
A rOOtin' away in the yard:
If the old man should say
Drive that hog away
Would you worry OF bite very hard?
The friends and admirers Of John Smith
will regret to hear that he las recently got
ten into trouble. He has been sent to the
House of Correction in England for ten days
for stealing turnip. 1t is very sad to think
that the last of his name and race should
thus be 'overtaken by the bitter pill Of az
Versity."
Olive Logan recently met Gen. Forrest,
of Tennessee, and appears to have been
somewhat astonished tO6nd him to be ofgen-
tlemanly manners. $50 great was my sur |
prise" she writes, "that laughinely said: |
why, General, thought you were des-
perate monster MADAM be replied, prob |
ably those northern soldiers and officers
who were your infornants, during the war
scarcely remained long enough in my i'm
mediate neighborhood to be capable OF
ildging."
A Connecticut boy swallowed three mar
bles and four bullets recently, and being
of bony structure, is now utin-
zed by the neighbOFs, who borrow him as
rattle box to aInuse their babes and suck
ngs.