The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1872-06-12
ROLLICKlNG RAMBLES.

Mr.. Griswold, the Fat Contribu-
tor" of the Cincinnati Times and
Chronicle, on n recent steamboat trip
down the Ohio amused himself bv
taking a vote for President He tells
the story as follows:
Tired of rambling by railroad, |
have recently been indulging my row.
ing disposition in steamboat RAM
Bile down the Ohio, and / propose to
ramblc about it on paper, for the read
crs of the Times and Chronicle
took the steamer General Lytle,
of the Mail Line, for Louisville, the
other evening, and had delightful
trip. After ten | thought | would
take vote of the passengers,
This is the period for taking votes
on board railroad trains, steamboats,,
&c, on the Presidential question:
The result is frequently published in
the newspapers as "A Straw" though
| have observed that no newspaper
ever prints a straw that does not
show the political wind to be setting
in their direction. When | cssayed
to take a vote of the passengers of
the General .Lytlc the other night,
Lytlc did | think Of the embarrass-
ments | would encounter in securing
it. am not much in politics, though
| am probably as much in politics as
politics is in me-
ONE VOTE FOR PIERCE.
| began with the captain of the
Lvtle "a starter.
Captain Whitten," said /, "wbo is
your choice for PRESIDENT"
well, replied the bold commander,
thoughfully, Captain Pierce has been
as good a President as the old Mail
Line ever had Reckon he'll do for
some years yet"
He thought | was talking about
hte President of the Louisville Mail
Line, but | put down one vote for
Pierce
TIE MATE GOES" FOR NE
Inext tackled the mate, who was
below experimenting some perpleX-
ing manGuvre in freight,
Mate" said /, cherily, trying TO
get out of the way of his men, and
getting in their way worse than ever,
as a matter Of course, 'who are YOU
going for ?"
"Who am | going for?" roarcd the
mate, angrily; I'm going for you if
YOU don't get out of this"
| got out Immediately | had to
do it, or become his mate.
FAyoRING HORACE,
! ascended to the cabin. \ schol-
arly looking man was reading by
table. Gle was reading by lamp,
more properly, yet he was by ta-
bic, too)
My friend" | remarked, blandly, !
as | produced note book and pencil,
"do YOU favor Horace" (He did IA I,
vor him little in his feet.)
That is a fair question:" said the |
scholarly looking man, laying down |
his book, which | perceived was a
Latin work of some kind, land | will |
answer it without undue circumlOcu- /
ton. While many of the odes of
Horace are unexcclled either i'll his /
own or any other language, yet mis-
verses lack the heroic ring which the |
poetic Tyre gives forth when Virgil .
sweeps the strings"
| told him Virgil might sweep the .
strings, but could he sweepthe South?
that was the question.
"Your language, my friend" con-
tinued l., satisfies me that you are in
reality Greeley man."
"How so?" inquired the man of
letters
you call Virgil poetic Tyre"
Down went the scholarly man for
Horace.
MAN OF LETTERS.
| am man of letters, as this letter
will show. If she shows anything
else, why letter!
1t may not be generally known, by ,
the way, that letters were invented
in PhGnicia, but they We're. That is
the reason you can't PhGnicia edu-
cation without them See it? Fin
ish We, eh? How's that? Ha!
ANYBODY TO BEAT GRANT.
While | was gathering up nv
straws, two men, somewhat intoxicat.
ed, got very much excited in discuss
ing the relative fitness Of Grant and
Greeley for the Presidency. While
one insisted that Grant knew nothing
about farming, the other inquired con-
temptuously what Greeley knew
bout war? He never fired (hic) two
hors-lumber-wag'n!n He seemed to
think that settled Horace.
"My friends" said |, 'let us have
peace. Why this strife, this conten-
ton, this bitterness of spirit? And
all, as Shakespeare says, for Hecuba."
"Oh, (hie) you be id" said the
man of gin. "An'bodyt to beat Grant"
HOW THE LADIES GO.
My next experiment was among
the ladies. | approached a dark-eyed
daughter of Kentucky, and in faith
erly and motherly way, which the diff
ference in our years warranted:-I
daughter, if you could be Grant or