The St. Cloud journal. [volume] (St. Cloud, Minn.) 1866-1876, 1872-07-11
THE DIARY OF ANNE
R0DWAY.
IN TWO CHAPTERS.
CHAPTER l.

CHAPTER l.
MARCH 3rd, 1910. A long letter to-
day from Robert, which surprised and
vexed and futtered me so, that I have
been sadly behind-haud with my work
ever since. He writes in worse spirits
than last time, and absolutely declares
that he is poorer even than when he
went to America, and that he has made
up his mind to come homo to London
How happy should be at this news,
if he only returned to rue E. prosperous
man! AS it is, though I love him
dearly, I cannot look forward to the
meeting him again, disappointed and
broken down and poorer than ever,
without a feeling almost of dread tor
both of US. I was twenty.six last
birthday and he was thirty three and
there seems less chance now than ever
of our being married. It is all I can
do to keep myself by my needle; and
his prospects, since. he failed in the
small stationery business three years
ago, are worse, if possible, than mine.
Not that I mind so much for myself ;
women, in all ways of life, and especi.
ally io my dress-makiug way, learn, I
think, to be more patient than men.
W hat I dread is Roberts dependency,
and the hard struggle he will have in
this cruel city to get his bread-let
alone making money enough to marry
me. So little do poor people want to
set up IN housekeeping and be happy
together, it seems hard that they can't
yet it when they are honest and hearty
and willing to work. The clergyman
said in his sermon, last Sunday eve
ming, that all things were ordered for
the best, and We are all put into the
stations in life that are properest for US.
I suppose he was right, being a clever
gentleman who fills the church to
crowdlug; but l think I should have
understood him better if I had not been
very hungry at the time, in conse.
quence of my own station in lite being
nothing but Plain Nsedlewoman.
March 4th. Mary Mallinson came
down to my room to take cup of tea
with me. I read her bits of Roberts
letter, to show her that if she has her
troubles, I have mine too; but I could
not succeed in cheering her. She says
she is born to misfortune, and that, as
long back az she can remember, che
has never had the least morscl of luck
to be thankful for. told her to go and
look in my glass, aud to say if she had
nothing to be thankful for then; for
Mary is a very pretty girl, and would
look still pretsier If she could be more
cheerful and dress neater. However,
my compliment did no good. She rat
tied her spoon impatiently in her tea.
cup and said, "If was only as good q
hand at needlework as you are, Anne,
/ would change faces with the uglies,
girl in London" "Not you " says l.
laughing. She looked at mo for mo.
ment, aud shook her head, and was ou'
of the room before l could get up and
.top her. She always runs of in tina,
way when she is going to cry, having ,
kind of pride about letting other peo'
pie see her in tears.
March 5th. A fright about Mary.
I had not seen her all day, as she does
not work at tue same place where + do
and in the evening abe meyer cam,
down to have tea with me, or sent M
word to 60 to her. So just before
went 1 ran upstairs to say goodnight
She did not answer when l Knocked
and when stepped softly into tn
loom I saw her in bed, asleep, with be,
work not half done, lying about til,
room in the untidiest way. There wa
nothing remarkable in that, and 1 wa
just going away on tip.toe, when tin,
bottle aad wine-glass on the chair b,
her bedside caught my eye. I though
she was i'll and had been taking physio
and looked at the bottle. It was mark
ed in large letters, "Laudanum-Poi
son:" My heart gave a jump as if i
was going to fly out Of me. lait
hold Of her with both bands, and shool
her with all my might. She wa.
sleeping heavily, and woke slowly, Al
it seemed to me-but still she die
wake. Itried to pull her out of bed
having heard that people ought to b.
always walked up and down when the,
have taken laudanum but she resisted
and pushsd me away violently.
Gam" " says she in fright. "Fo
gracious sake, what's come to you'll
Are you out Of your senses 2"
! 20, Mary! Mary" says I holdin,
up the bottle before her, "If l hadn'
come in when I lid" And I lai,
hold Of her to shake her again.
| She looked puzzled at me for me
ment-then smiled the first time
had seen her do 80 for many a Ion,
day)-then put her arms round N
neck.
"Don't be frightened about me, An
ne," she says, ~ am not worth it, an
there is no need"