Knoxville weekly chronicle. [volume] (Knoxville, Tenn.) 1870-1875, 1872-01-31
A Story of Nevada Bummers In New York
BY MARK TWAIN.

BY MARK TWAIN.
Mark Twain thus describes the expert
ence of two Nevada chaps, Jack and Jim,
who having made some money, went to
New York to see the sights. They want
ed to take a ride so they got into an ON
nibus.
".Ain't it gay though? Oh no, L reck-
on not. Cushions, windows and pictures till
YOU can't rest. What would the boys say
if they could see what a swell we are cut
ting in New York? BY George. | wish
they could see US.
Then he put his head out Ofthe window,
and shouted to the driver:
"Say, Johnny, this suits me suits
yours truly, you bet you! want this She
bang all day I'm on it, old man Ietem
out! Make 'em go, Wen make it ali
right to you, sonny ~
The driver passed his hand through the
| stray-hole, and tapped for his fare-it was
before the gongs came into common use:
Colonel Jack took the hand and shook it
cordially. He said
"You twig me, old pard. All right be-
tween gents. Smell of that and see how
you like it,.
And he put a twenty dollar gold piece in
the drivers hand. After a moment the
driver said he could not make the change.
it in your pocket"
Then to Colonel Jim, with sounding
slap on his thigh:
|Aint it style, though? Hanged if I
don't hire this thing every day for a
| week.
The omnibus stopped and a young lady
got in. Colonel Jack started for mo-
ment, then nudged Colonel Jim with his
elbow.
Don't say a word, )" he whispered. Let
her ride, if she wants to. Gracious, there s
room enough. -
The young lady got out her portee-monI-
naie, and handed her fare to Colonel Jack.
whats this for ?" he asked.
Give it to the driver, please
"Take back your money, madame. We
can't allow it. You are welcome to ride
| as long as YOU please, but the shebang is
chartered we shau't let you pay cent,
The girl sank into corner bewildered.
| An old lady with basket climbed in, and
proffered her fare.
are perfectly welcome here, madame
but we can't allow you TO pay. Sit right
down there, mum, and don't feel the leas
uneasy. Make yourself as free as II yor
were in your own turnout"
! Within two minutes three gentlemen
two fat women and couple of children
entered.
i'Come right along, friends, - said Colo
mel Jack don't mind US. This IL FREE
| blowout. nThen he whispered to Colone
| Jim, New York amt no sociable place
| don't reckon il amt no name for it."
He resisted every effort to pass fares Z
the driver and made everybody cordial,
welcome. The situation dawned upon tn
people, and they poclHeted their money
and delivered themselves up to covert en-
joyment of the episode. Half dozel
more passengers entered.
"Oh, there's plenty of room,' said Co
lionel Jack walk in and make yourselve
comfortable. A blowout amt worth any
thing. Then in whisper to Colonel Jim
"But amt these New Workers friendly
And amt they cool about it, tOop Ice
|, bergs amt anywhere. reckon they,
tackle hearse, lift was going their way.
/ More passengers got in more yet, an
still more. Both seats were filled, and
file of men were standing up holding oil
10 the cleats overhead. Parties with blan
kets and bundles were climbing up on tn
roof Half-suppressed laughter rippled u
, from all sides.
, "WelI, for clean, cool, out-and-out cheeh
If this don't bang anything that ever
, saw, I'm an Injun.n whispered ColonC
, Jack.
A Chinaman crowded his way in.
( II weaken said Colonel Jack. ''Hol
: on, driver! Keep your seats, ladies an
n gents. Just make yourselves free-every
4 things paid for. Driver, rustic these foil
: around as long rs they're mind TO go
: | friends of ours, you know. Take thel
everywhere, and If you want more none
2 come TO the st. Nicholas and we'll make
ali right. Pleasant journey TO you, ladi'
n and gents 60 it as long as you please
q shan't cost you cent"
3 The two comrades got out, and Colon
0 Jack said:
3 "Jimmy. it's the sociablest place 1 ev
0 saw. The Chinaman waltzed in as con
9 Portable as anybody. If we'd staid
Q while | reckon we'd had some Niger
. BY George, We'll have %, barricade o.
= doors tonight, or some Of these ducks W
e be trying 70 sleep with US 4
+ Gen Joe Lane candidate for Vice Preside