The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1872-06-07
IR SS.

Y
Fish are so thick in Clear lake,
! California, that a veracious citizen
says: at is only necessary to
wade IN and choose your fish, the
difficulty being which fish to
choose"
Gen. Joe Hooker is entirely help
less from paralytic prostration, and
has to be supported by his son
wherever he goes. He IS now on
his way to California for the bene-
fit of his health.
There arc three modes Of bearing
the ills of life: By seeming indif-
ference. which is The most common !;
by philosophy, which is TIE most
ostentatious; and by religion, which
is the most effectual.
A Newberg damsel has framed
the verdict jury gave in her favor
in suit for breach of promise of
marriage, and has hung it conspic-
iously in her parlor as a frlghtful
warning to all triflers.
Valentine Rabbit, young Louis
vile gentleman who disposed of his
rival by laying for him and shooting
him dead with q boss pistol, has an
engagement for an open air matinee
on the Goth of July.
A beautiful instance of undying
affection was shown by the lately
deceased Bishop of st. Asaph, in
Wales, who for twenty years, every
day, storm or sunshine, strewed
flowers on his wife's grave.
a man who was delivering pub
lie address in Mass, the other eve
ming stepped over the edge of the
platform, and, striking on his feet,
continued. 'to come down TO the
leYel of my audience"
a resident of Brooklyn, who
was picked up in the streets of
New York, drunk, with loose
change to the amount of S24,500,
was discharged from custody on
Friday by Judge Ledwith.
eve will meet in heaven, hus-
band, DEAR" is the affectionate cpl
Japh which an Ohio woman has in
scribed upon the tombstones of each |
of three departed husbands. Trouble |
ahead in that family, certain.
A Mrs. Bradley, of New York,
-
600, and she took the money when
he died. She then became Mrs.
Warner, and Mr.. Warner dying, she
sdded $4,000 to her store.
Christian Sackow, a countryman
of Ole Bull, has invented and plays
a violin with twelve strings; four
are arranged as in the old-faShioned
fiddle, and the others are of fine
steel wire tuned to accord.
Mr.. Bennett of the New York
Herald has a telegraph wire (nine
miles, connecting the Herald Office
with his residence at Fort Washing
ton also a shorter line (three miles)
to his house on Fifth Avenue.
Foreign advices show Antioch to
be in deplorable condition. Earth
quake shocks still continue; peo-
pie are afraid to enter the ruined
city, and the dead lying unburie1
will likely generate pestilence.
An ingenious burglar who was in
New Haven for trying peoples
back doors, professed to be walking
in his sleep; and when asked to
give an account of himself said
he was stranger in the village"
We are pleased to hear that Poor
ia proposes to contribute a whistle
to the Jubilee. 1t will not leave
but will receive tele-
signals when to shrek,
and can be clearly heard in Boston.
Medical societies are warned not
to ask certain Western minister to
preach for them. He has this text
ready: "In his-disease Asa sought
not TO the Lord, but TO the bhysi-
clans. And Asa slept with his faith
ers."
Ping Wing, was the fireman's son,
very worst boy in all Canton he
stole his mothers picked mice, and
he threw the cat in the boiling rice,
and he ate her up, and then says he,
''Me wonder where the mew-cat
bel"
The people of Utah express great
disapprobation because Judge Nc
Kean dallies so long in Washington,
while there are moro than 200
cases on his docket, which have
been awaiting trial more than
year.
uG Ut NC" VT |
leans, to be completed this summer,
will effectuaIly drain an area of
twelve square miles, including
New Orleans and Carrollton-
sewerage to Lake Pom I
chartrain.
A little boy accosted his papa, last
week, thus: "Papa are you silt
growing?" "No, dear: what makes
you think so 2" because the top of
your head is coming through your
hair" The poor politician is got
ting bald.
The Saginaw (Michigan) Relief
Committee give a detailed report of
distributions in seven counties, and
have closed operations. Their re-
sources were, cash. S1S,S1l; sup
plies, $1,000; clothing, $50, $50.
Total, $60,09l.
A correspondent of the Iowa
Homestead describes n pear tree
which was grated on q hawthorn
in 1908, and which is now fifty feet
high, trunl' five feet nine inches in
circumference. 1t bears fifty BUSH
els of pears annually.
Professor Goltz of Konigsberg,
in his experiments upon the nerv-
Gus center of frogs, finds that if you
take out the brain, and then rub
wet finger down the frogs back, the
creature will croak as if pleased.
Frogs must be easily pleased.
The New York Nation says, re-
garding the sentiment of Southern |
ers toward Greeley: "They look |
upon him as Iidicnlous old fool,
and for that reason will do their best |
to install him at the White House
as bitter revengeful joke"
"Salts of demoniac" were recently
called for at a country store in /
Western Massachusetts. The apoth- |
ecary filed the bill with pint of |
New England rum. Anything |
wasn't down in his materia medica. |
1t is estimated that there ara H.
GOO saloons and groceries in San |
Francisco, which dispense annually |
10000 barrels of lager, 100000 gal |
Ions of wine and 100000 gallons
of the more stimulating fluids, |
the total value of which is s10,O00,-
600.
Mother Goose is not an imaginary
person. She was the mother-In-
law of a printer in Boston, Massa-
chusetts, and her real name was
Elizabeth Goose. The first edition
of her well known rhymes was sold
for two coppers on Devonshire
street.
Smith and Jones were at the mem
agerie, and the conversation turned
on Darwin's theory. "Lookssat that
monkey" said Smith. Think of