New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1872-01-21
A NABOB,s VISIT TO NEW yORE
BY MARX TWAIN.


lAs told by himself in his new book O.,
tilted "Roughing It," now in press. 1t Is.
sample of the good things contained there.
In Nevada there used to be current Tho
story and adventure of two of her naboks
which may or may not have occurred. /
give it Tor what it is worth.
Colonel jim had seen somewhat of IN.
world. and knew more or less OF its wavs.
but Colonel Jack was from the back settle
ments of the States, had led life of ardn.
ous toll. and had never seen city.
These two. blessed with sudden wealth
nro;acteI a visit to New York-Colonsi
lack TO see the sights, and Colonel Jim ~
ouard his unsophisticatien from misfortune.
They reached San Francisco in the night
and sailed in the morning. Arrived in
New York, Colonel Jack said:
and now / mean to have ride in one;
don't care what it costs. Come along.
they stepped on the sidewalk, and
Colonel Jim called stylish barouche. -But
Colonel Jack said:
No sir! None of your Cheap-JOhn turn.
onts for me. ! am here to have a good time.
and money amt any object. Imean to have
the nobbiest rig that's going. Now here
comes the very trick. Stop that yaller one
with the pictures on li-uOu you Iret-Iu
stand all the expense myself.
So Colonel Jim stopped an empty omni
brs and thew got in. Said Colonel Jack:
Amt it gay, though! Oh no, reckon
NOT. Cushions, and windows, and pictures
iii Won can't rest. What would the boys
saw if they could see us cutting swell like
this in New York! By George, wish they
could see u.s.
Then he put his head out of the window,
and shouted to the driver:
Saw, Johnny, this suits me-suits yours,
truly, you bet you! l want this shebang
ali day. I'm on it, old man! Let 'em out!
Make 'em go! Wen make 1t all right to
YOU, sonny.
The driver passed his hand through the
strap hole and tapped tor his tare-lt was
before the gOngs came into common USE
Colonel Jack took the hand and shook it
cordially. He said:
You twig me, old pard All right be-
tween gents. Smell OF that, and see how
you like it
And he put twenty dollar gold piece in
the drivers hand. After a moment the
driver said he could not make change.
Bother the change. Ride out Put it in
Then to Colonel Jim, with a sounding
slap on his thigh:
Amt it style, though! Hanged if don't
hire this thing every day for a week.
The omnibus stopped and young lady
got in. Colonel Jack started for moment,
then nudged Colonel Jim with his elbow.
Don't say word" he whispered. Let
her ride if she wants to. Gracious, there's
room enough
The Young lady got out her pOrtemonnae
and handed her fare to Colonel Jack.
WHAT'S this for p he said.
..Giye il tO the driver please"
Take back your money. madame We
can't allow it. You are welcome to ride
here as long as you please, but the shebang
is chartered, We shal't let you pay cent
The girl shrank into a corner bewildered
An old lady with basket climbed in, and
protfered her fare.
Excuse me-" said Colonel Jack. You
are perfectly welcome here. madame, bu:
we can't allow you to pay. Set right dow
there mum, and don't you feel the leas:
uneasy. Make yourself as free as if you
were in your turnout
Within two minutes three gentlemen, two
fat women and couple of children ez
tered.
Come right along, friends said Colonel
Jack. don't mind u.s. this Is tree blow
out Then he whispered to Colonel jim
New York amt no sOciable place: don't
reckon it amt no name for it.
ne FeSlSttu every cHoAI W PtAsS laios !"
the driver. and made everybody cordially
welcome. The situation dawned on the pee
pie, and they pocketed their money, and
delivered themselves up to covert enjoyment
of the episode. Half dozen more passen-
GERS entered.
..Oh. there is plenty of room," said Colont
Jack. Walk right in, and make yourselvs
at home. A blowout amt worth anything
as blowout unless body has company
Then, in a whisper to Colonel Jim "Bu.
amt these New Workers friendly ! And am
they cool about it, too Icebergs amt any
where. reckon they'd tackle a hearse, II
it was going their way
More passengers got in; more yet. and
| still more. Both seats were flied. and I'll
of men were standing up, holding on to The
cleats overhead. Parties with baskets and
bundles were climbing up on the roof
Half-suppressed laughter rippled up from
all sides.
We'll, for clean, cool, out-and-out cheek,
| if this don't bang anything that ever saw
I'm an Injun," whispered Colonel Jack.
4 Chinaman crowded his way in.
Il weaken" SAID Colonel Jack. Hold
! on. driver! Keep your seats, ladies and
| gents. just make yourselves free-every-
things paid for. Driver, rustic these folks
around as long as they're mind to go
friends Of ours, you know. Take them
everywhere, and II you want more money,
come to the 81. Nicholas, and well make 1t
all right. Pleasant journey to you. ladies
and gents: go it just as long as you please
it shan't cost you a cent
The two comrades got out, and Colonel
Jack said:
Jimmy, its the sociablest place ! ever
saw. The Chinaman waltzed in as comfort
able as anybody. If we'd staid awhile |
reckon we'd have some niggers BY George
we'll have to barricade our doors to-nlght
or some of these ducks will be trying 10
Il