The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1872-10-04
Che 9enlofrat.
rRIDAY.......,......o .ocTBER "a, 1872
scrssoRrNes.

A social glass to which ladies are
nd,licted--the mirror.
Miss construction = Whalebone,
waddiug, powder and paint.
When does a man have to keep his
word? When no one viii take it.
How to make hot. hed-put your
candle near your pillow and read
yourself to sleep.
A man is not like q chicken the
older he gets the tender.r he be-
comes. Young ladies. please noiel
A furniture man is said to be the
LATEST member of society. becausa he
keeps chairs aud lounges alb ut all
day. 49, s KAS~A3- =. = 2
When the married couples at t,
seaside resorts enter the diniu E room
it is good time to ses-t the tied eonl-
ing III. ~ Ally ~------------
The difference between October
md November is. that while with
October leaves fall, with November
fail leayes.
You run no risk by penriug oil ont
of eau into youI stove If YOU have
no fire in it. Another safe way is to
have no oil in the can. ..~a.4, Ass.
An old lady is collecting all the
political journals she, cap get, >to
make saap,af. She says they con-
tam 695 per cent of pure ''Ee.
THE verb 10 love, SAYS wicked
French writer. ''is an active verb.
which runs until it siuks exhausted
into the easy chair of marriage. .
Another old lady has taken her
first rifle in the cars. aud remarked.
when the tram ran off the track :,
You fetch up rather sudden. don
ye?"
Some youngstrs were watching the
process of Matching chickens by
steam. One, SAID TO uuo: her. = Won
der if their mother kncws they're
oui?"
It is said that n green tarlatan
dress co;stains arsenic enough tn kill
a man. aud yet men do mot seem tn
lie afraid to go near green tarlatau
dresses. - --s-7~e
Name The longest day in the
year." said n Nashua teacher to- a
Young hopeful of five Summers.
Sunday" resp nded the little VIC
tin of blue law.
Re:or daughter to Sunday school
scholars YOU have AN elder
brother; well. how old Is be? =
School -boy-'Dunno. miss; but hes
just started y swearin -
''Oh, Tommy, that was abo:ninable
in You 10 eat YOU sisters share u
the cakei "'WhY," sail Tommy,
''didn YOU tell me. MIA. that | was,
always to take her iartg"
Wno Ire4the most ,iiScontented of,
all irad sinen? Biacksniths; for
their bellows and blows are always
going. aud they are striking for
wages ail the Year round.
Don Pistt SAYS there are two seasons
in which our Administration seeks
repose from Its gi.anric labors: one
!, til t which proceeds the huiidIys,
and the other that vii ch follows.
A little girl went into Il drug store
the other day. and said to the pro
prietor. in haif whisper. III lit
tie girl hahn t got IIU money, how
mueh chewinss gum do you give rer
for no. hin.?"
A plumber has an Irish la in his
employ, and one day having ucc;as-
ion for p,.ice of zluc- ordered hin
to get one-twelye inches square.
Yes. sir. sail Pat. twelve inshes
square, but how ions?"
Walter, a five -year-oid. was sur
Tr sd at breakfast by the presence
of diininutive egg. served for his
special sIeiectsltion. He thus accouiI-
tfd for the eggs snlaiIness: Mann
ma, / think the chicken was learnng
to lay.
Papa-''I am sorry to hear. my
dear boy, that you have failed again
III obtalnins a prize this quarter.
You must have been very wooden
headed. Dear Boy Yes, papa.
m afraid I'm chip of the old
block"