The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1871-08-31
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KOBb Jr.- His Experiences Astride
Of a Goat.

mysterious ceremonies popularity
supposed to be attendent upon in
iatiOn into a Masonic Lodge, we
find among our exchanges. The
ridiculous and extravagant will,
we apprehend, be relished by Ma
sons themselves:
I fatter myself I understand
something about secret societies.
I've had q passion for that sort of
thing ever since I was old enough
to tell lies. I have secuted around
pretty extensively among the diff
ferent organizations. I've been an
Orangeman, and a Fenian, and a
Good Templer, and a Counterfeiter,
and a knight of Malta. I have be
lOnged to the Sons of Temperance,
and the Odd fellows, and the
Young Mems Christian Association
and the Band of Hope and a band
of robbers. I've been into every
thing, and Thought I knew every
thing almost, but didn't. Three
months ago 1 became infatuated
with Masonry, and since 1 joined
that organization I've discovered
that there are several things con
nected herewith that outsiders
don't know a pretty good deal a
bout.
On the evening 1 was to be initia-
ted I made my wilf and took a
most affecting leave of my family.
Thus prepared I started for the
Lodge, accompanied by my brother
Jno. Smith, S. R. S. P. T., who was
to ''see me through" We had no
difficulty in getting past the first
entrance, but when we knocked at
the second, a fat little fellow looked
through a hole in the door, and put
this startling indictory to Brother
Smith: Chetuxc Observation-Disclosures?
to which Brother Smith replied
cheerfully: ''NiX-my-dolly-
whack-doo." The little fellow
then said: neutrality-suspicious.
tum;" and my conductor giving a
satisfactory answer, we were per-
mitted to enter. Before I had
time to look around me a long leg
ged fellow knocked me down with
club; he then stood me on my feet
and another marauder made a rnsh
at me and brought me down again.
After 1 had undergone this ex-
,hilarating exercise for about five
minutes, they stretched me out on
a bench, and examined my teeth,
and pinched my muscles, and stuck
pins into me all over, and showed
cayenne pepper up my nose, and
pulled hairs out of the back Of my
neck with red hot pincers, with q
view, I suppose, to make me feel
unembarrassed and ut home.
When 1 came to my senses I was
alone in the ante-r room Of the lodge.
It was a lively and cheerful apart
ment. A couple of crocodiIos were
amusing themselves in a corner,
and a few full grown rattle-snakes
were practicing the flying trapeze
on the stove pipe.
The furniture consisted chiefly of
half dozen mummies, the skele-
ton of Captain Kidd, Lucretia Bor-
gia, Guy Fawkes, Jack the Giant
Killer, Oliver Cromwell, the Wand
ering Jew, Christopher Columbus
and Dick Turpin; flying machines
three barrels of gunpowder, and a
remarkable healthy and we'll
developed wildcat.
Just then half a dozen pirates,
clad in aprons and sashes, rushed
into the room with a whoop. One
of them, the biggest and ugliest,
who appeared to be their chief or
dered the attendants in a voice Of
thunder to trot out the animal. The
attendant disappeared, but imme-
diately reappeared leading an iron
clad, a regular double decker, with
sixteen horns, a pair Of wings and
seven or eight tails stuck all over
him. My eyes were bandaged and
I was told to mount. I said "Gen-
tlemen, if you'll excuse me, I would
rather not. I'm not accustomed TO
going up in a balloon; besides, I've
got an engagement down town. Ny
wife wants to sec me particularly.
I'll be back in few minutes; I
rather think my house is on fire,
but I'll be back in few minutes:
yes, gentlemen in a few Before
/ could finish the sentence I was
seized from behind and planted
firmly astride the Internal goat.
Somebody then said let go, and
away we went I've been through
a good many perilous scenes; I've
taken part in election fights; I've
been down in a railroad collision;
and up in a steamboat explosion;
I've fallen down three flights Of
stairs, and walked out Of a fourth
story window; but this goat ride
was ahead Of them all When I
come TO reflect on the matters in
cold blood. I wonder that I ever
come out alive.
The furious beast kicked aud