Bristol news. [volume] (Bristol, Va. & Tenn.) 1867-189?, 1871-08-11

Was that fearless, brave deck hand.
A green grocer-One who trusts.
1t is libel to say that NeUacla ed
itors go barefooted.
Newark manufactured s., 500, 600
worth of patent leather las. year.
Hartford has 1, 400 more names this
year than last in its directory, and
$4,000 in all.
Why are birds melancholy in the
morning? Because their little bills
are all over dew.
The chaplain of the Iowa State
Prison was asked by a friend how his
parishioners were. "All under con
viction," was the reply.
Out Of thirty thousand volumes in
the Mercantile Library of st. Louis
over seventeen thousend are never
called for by anybody.
An Iowan has produced an inven-
ton which, the local paper says, viii
effect perfect revolution in the saw
ing of wood. A circular saw, proha.
bly,.
Mary Earnest, of Michigan. has
died, aged 100. Before her death she
made the remark: 81 guess the LORD
has forgotten me and left me on the
earth"
Clothes, despicable as we think
them, are unspeakably significant
From the kings mantle downwards,
they are emblematic of manifold
cunning victory over want.
An old lady from one of the rural
districts astoniShed clerk in one OF
the stores, a few days ago, by inquir
ing if he had any ''yaller develop.
ments SIGH as they did up letters in. -
There are fifty manufacturing estab-
lishments at Rock Island, Illinois, and
vicinity, which have a capital OF
IS, POI, 600, employ 1, 056 hands, and
sell goods to the amont Of So, 1873, 600
annually.
"A man who would maliciously set
fire to barn." said good old Elder
Person. land burn up stable full Of
horses and cows, ought to be kicked
to death by jackass, and I'd like to
be the one to do it..
There may be something in name,
for the very polite Boston papers call
their Founding Asylum a Refuge
for Anonymous Infants" while Chi
cago, with the most finished etiquette,
announces a "Ranche for babies born
on the European PLAN"
An indianapolis German Lad occa-
sion recently to bury large wife. and
so squa5bled with the sexton about
the fee. dat ish not big grave"
said the disconsolate husband. "Not
a big grave - Indignantly responded
the sexton; "Why, bless you, that's
a cellar %
4 good story is told of Miss Lane
while she was at the Executive Nam
sion. a photographer presented her
with an album, containing forty-twO
differend views of Miss Lane. Jones
on seeing it, that it was
the most Miscellaneous book he had
ever seen.
A QUEER ANNoUNCEMENT.-The
Petersburg Index has this singular
item: "Wm. Machen, for many
years past the Devil in our office, hav-
ing served his apprenticeship faith
fully, and cOnformed with the rules
of the office by treating all of his fell
low craftsmen, is this day declared a
gentleman.
Gail Hamilton affirms, ''as the
most painful and unexpected result of
my ewn observation, that the grOssest
violations of courtesy, modesty. deli
cacy and decency attributable to cor
have been perpetrated by
women"
The great Libraries of Paris were
a possession of mankind. Itappears
now that the National Library, said
to be the largest in the world has es-
capped. but that the libraries of the
Hotel de Vile, rich in historicalc col |
lections, and of the Louvre, 100, 600 |
volumes, especially curious for its
specimens of Typography. have utter
Iy persisted.
A neighboring exchange says that
1ne of the fashions Of this season5is to
read over all the advertisements in
The paper, and see ifall the stories are
keeping up with the season and styles.
If you miss any familiar name from
the list of business men. you can know
that they are not keeping I'D with the
lines, and are keeping out of sight on
his account. F.s.-r
a typo made us last night use the
''buttered thunder."-
That is sort of thunder of which up
% last night we had not heard. The
word should have been '-muttered."
London AtlCertiSer.
The explanation was hardl, nee
,ssary. Doubtless, the printer had
IN idea that ''buttered thunder had
ome affinity to CREASED lightning"
Toronto Lealer.