The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1871-05-05
z sCTssoRINGs.

4 Why IS blush ike little sIfIlf De-
cause il becomes a woman. 80
i Lawyers mouths are ike .turnpike
gates-- never open except for pay.
| Oar reputation depends greatly. on
Tour choice Of companions.
Better be upright with poverty than
upp-incipied with plenty
/ Without consistency there is no NOR
al strength ~ as* 81
Endeasor for tho best aad prepare
Tor the worst. al si5as
i The body--that is dust; the soul
Its the bud Of eternity.
4 Ifthe best mans faults were written
90 bis forehead, il would make him pull
/ his hatoyer his eyes. gf-' 2 ssss'ss4A-
f a eat 10 Evansville catches pigeons
and takes them home for: her masters
table. 80 s lzg
i The first American child BORN 10
Alaska got disguised, and left before il
was nine months old.
i An abapdoned editor cautions his tall
i readers against kissing short womeDs as
alshe habit. has rendered HIM round shoul-
dered. .aa8 sffls 4sssss. ara
i "A .Cbicagona has patented - new
process Of petrifcation, and will be able
to furnish tobacco signs as fast as the
4 Indians die. ~ :.
4 It is said that the Kaw Indians salt
the railroad track In their country for
the purpose Of enticing cattle In front
Of the cars 90 they can get their car
cases. s-.s.,s
An old Spanish proverb says: CAT
thirteen, marry your daughter to her
isnpeFior; at twenty, to her equal; at
thirty. to anybody that wiz have her"
An Adirondack native, at Saratoga,
iseeinga Broadway belle driving her
T phaeton, with the servant In livery be-
hind. remarks, That negro must pay
that nice.lookipg girl pile to drive for
him." - = e@aSs9e
Always laugh when you can't is
!, cheap medicine. MirthfnIncss is q phi
losophy not well understood. 1t is the
sunny side of existence. s
|. Paris has always had the reputation
, Of being the gayest city in the world,
; but the pumbsr of balls there, at the
present time surpasses any thing
Il A traveller, who has lately been ship
wrecked CD the ocean, has a notion that
there is precious liiile poetry IN being
. rocked in the cradle of the deep
4 Quaker lady recently explained to
} her new girl that washing day came
; every Second Day. The girl left in
high dudgeor. She didn'r 60 to, be
washing every other day.
Indiana is emphatically a railroad
: State. Out of ninety-three counties in
the State, seventy one are crossed By
/ one or more railroads. With stations at
the county seat.
II Remember that self interest il more
] likely TO warp your Judgment. than all
/ other circumstances combined; therefore
/ lock well to your duty when your inter-
I est is concerned. ass1ies1A
y Elizabeth cady Stanton Is said to
) have stormcd considerable when cher
: indictment against white males ap-
I peared In print as an ns'indictmenta gainst
!, white mules.
What's TO be done, if all the women
follow the fashion of the women of
t Cleveland, who have introduced into
successful practice tho trick Of asking
their husbands for money 10 the psssencs
of company? -z
DoS.T You HEAR?-aM Mother" eaid
little johnny. running into the house
8 on Friday afternoon, whe1 the thunder
: was sounding heavily. ITS going to
rain, for don't you hear the pumps GO
!. ing" 80.
At n public sale of books In London,
Drew's Essay on Souls" was knocked
/. down to a shoemaker, who to the amuse-
ment of the assembly, = asked the auo-
tioneer if he had .'any more books on
: shocmaking to sell.
a New York bridegroom was SO de-
lighted with his prize that he paid Hen
y nv Ward Beecher $500 for marrying
. him to her.. In couple of years. he
= may be willing to pay twieef that sum
It for legal unhitchmert.. -
~ It is vain to stick your finger into
t, water, aud pulling it out, look for the
i hole; and equally vain to suppose that,
:, however large a space you occupy. that
e the world would miss YOU When you
g have passed on. .E~
y The N. Y. Forld says; HThe average
weight, all the year round, of that por-
5, ton of woman clothing which is sup
: : ported from the waist, is between tenand
= a fifteen pounds. Aresweak backs won
= der2 Put on suspcuders, girls"
RS A little boy, running. struck his toe
,e and fell ON the payement sNeyer mind