Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1871-11-15
Shirts Versus Wives.

Five years had passed since Fred Lattimer
and his wife Daisy had commenced life to-
gether, and so far they had lived in the utmost
harmony.
She was an ambitious little woman, not in
the sorosistical sense, but that she might
please her husband, aud make happy home
for him and the children. To carry out such
an ambition is to be very unsefsh and self
sacrificing. In spite of her many cares,
Daisy was bright and happy little wife
her husband was as the apple of her eye and
she was CLEAN Of sunshine to him. She
managed her children with wisdom, and su-
perintended her household prudently; she
sang lullabys to queit the baby, and clicked
the sowing-machine when he slept; all the
household sewing passed through her nimble
fingers and, in addition to all this, she made
Fred's shirts Every spring half a dozen
linen, and every fall as many new cotton
shirts, were, after being beautifully done up
by Bridget, laid in Freds bureau drawer.
Daisy liked to do this for Fred, and Fred
was very proud of his wife's dainty workman.
ship.
At the gate of every paradise fingers a
serpent, and there was one here, troubled and
exasperated at the sight of so much domestic
happiness; and | now proceed to chronicle
his attempt to destroy it,
Fred was standing one morning before the
glass adjusting his collar, and was noticing
with satisfaction, the satin-like smoothness Of
his shirt-bosom. The demon of the shirt
thought this a good time to commence his
operations SO perching on his shoulder, he
whispered softly in his ear, " Don't you think
your collar pulls just little in the neck p
Fred started as the suggestion took form in
his mind. do believe it does" he said to
himself; "realy, | wonder | never noticed
that before Yes that certainly is very bad
Daisy must see to that at once. Then, rails
ing his voice, he called to his wife, who was
in the next room, " Daisy, dear, come here q
minute, won't you2"
Yes, Fred" she replied "just as SCOT
as | get baby out of the bath"
There" whispered the demon thai
baby always comes first with her."
That's so,' acquiesced the husband.
Come Daisy, can't you hurry up 7" he call
ed again, so impatient that, wondering at hi
unwonted humor, she wiped the pearl drop
from baby's beautiful limbs, and throwing
blanket over him, she laid him on the bed
and ran in, wiping her hands as she went oil
the baby's towel.
d" Daisy" said her husband, d" Just look u
this shirt of mine, won't you ? 1t pulls
little here in the neck | think if you coul
manage to raise it trihe in the back
would make it loose in the front !" and b
pulled impatiently at the unofending gar
ment as he spoke. As Daisy did not answer
be continued think that all it wants
a gore or something in the back" Ere
might as well have said Aounce, for all b
knew about the merits or nature Of either
but he liked to speak of cores and biases I
show his perfect familiarity with the technical
tiles Of sewing-the words have such mar
y, martial sound and it was his delight t
suggest them as general remedies for all mis-
takes Of the needle.
81 suppose, said Daisy, thoughtfully
' that | could rip off the band, and pioc
the shirt up in the back. But isn't it
pity to have it altered when it seems such
good ft?"
/" A good fit J" repeated Fred why
| don't know what you can be thinkiD
about to say that 1t don't fit me well a
ALL"
"Why, Fred, how you do talk !" her lii
tie mouth puckoring up the least in tn
world at his unusual tone. I" Away
thought you were satisfied with your shirts
$50 have BEEN" retorted Fred bu
can't fellow grow ? That's just the wa
with you women you think there can b
no Improvement in anything you do. be
lieye in progress. am sure il won't hur
you to take these few stitches to please me
will it 2"
"Oh, no, Fred said his wife "Ill do i
sometime to-day. But there's the baby cry
ing must run and dress him."
Fred took of the shirt, and marked with
pencil the width Of seam higher which wa
all he thought il would need. The next on,
he put on had the same fault.
The whole half dozen will have to be al
tered, Of course said the demon. " Daisy
is so systematic that if there is fault 10 one
you will find it in all"
SO Fred called out to his wife that he would
leave the shirts lying on the bed, and that she
might as well alter them all, and make one
job Of it.
After the baby had gone to sleep that
morning the little wife sat down with the
six shirts before her, and after several
hours of unrcmttng industry ths few stitches