Wyandot County Republican. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1869-1903, 1871-12-21
CURRENT ITEMS.

never advertise.-Neao York Post.
A New YORK man has attempted sui
eide four or five times. He cuts his
throat from year to year, but never sue
Ceeds.
To remove grease spots from silks and
velvet-place red hot iron upon the
part: it will take them out directly.
LITTLE Dicks mother asked him what
kind of nuts she should buy for him ::
Doughnuts, mamma; me can crack 'em
with my toofs."
ENRAGED PARENT-"Did you throw
the half-brick at random?" Weeping
Boy-"No; / threw it at Johnny viii
liams." And did you strike him on
purpose?" No; l struck him on the
nose"
You don't think so highly of the
hymeneal knot as l do" said wife to-
her husband. Yes, I do" he replied;
6 1t is only when you wish to make it a
double beau knot that object to it."
AN Irishman, fresh from the Emerald
Isle, upon seeing horse running away,
exclaimed, "Oh, he isn't running very
fast I've seen horse run so fast you
couldn't see him."
As man was burying his wife, he said
to his friend, in the graveyard: "Alas !!
you feel happier than l." Yes, neigh
bor," said the friend 81 ought to feel
happier, have two wives buried herer'
A NEW HAVEN plumber has on his
sign, "Cast iron sinks, all Sizes" An
intoxicated Individual, in passing, man
aged to spell the words out, and turning
on his heel, said, Well, who (hic) says it
doesn't ?'
A CURRENT paragraph asserts that
many years ago Horace Greeley wrote to
female contributor, requesting her to
abstain from further poetry. A council
of friends inspected the letter, and finally
pronounced it an offer of marriage
Hence Mrs. Greeley and the Junior Gree
leys.
A GENTLEMAN who was recently mar
ried engaged a special car for himself and
bride, beautifully fitted up inside and di-
vided into bedroom, drawing room and
kitchen, which was to be attached to
every train, as they :iourneyed ON their
way, en- route for San Francisco.
"GRAc1E, don't you think Mr.. Winkins
is handsome MANI" 'Oh, no; l can't
endure his homeliness. "Well, he's a
lucky man, anyway. An old uncle has
just died and left him half million of
dollars" "You don't say SO! Come to
think, there is certain noble air about
him, and he has fine eyes-that can't be
denied"
A WESTERN man, while absent from
home, was taken dangerously sick. He
sent for his wife to come at once and
care for him. Now, the wife's mother
was sick, too, and she sent this dispatch
to her languishing husband: "Dear Tim,
mother is sick, l can't leave her Do the
best you can. If you die, send your body
home.'
THIS is how New London drunkard
put on his hat when the wind blew it in
the gutter: He knelt down slowly, like a
superanuated camel, and inserted his head
into it, pressed it firmly down with his
head against the cnrbing, and then arose
with sort of ridiculous majesty, and
the broad smile of big success parting his
lips.
A LARGE surprise party at Bridgeport,
Conn.,, the other night, carried with them
an unlimited quantity of provisions, ex-
pecting to have fine supper, but the
lady surprised supposed the affair to be a
sort of a donation visit, and very coolly
deposited the good things in the pantry
The party waited until the pangs of hun
ger drove them incontinently away.
NOBODY was ever killed by warming his
house little too early in the fall, but
many persons catch cold, and the grave
ailments following it, by deferring toe
long after the weather becomes chilly, to
light their fires. There should be a good
thermometer, marked with the degrees o1
Fahrenheit's scale on one side and of the
better and simpler Centigrade scale on the
other, in every sitting-room. Whenever
tho nOrDinr tamnorot1ra of room fa1 II,
below 81 Fahrenheit Q9o Cent? a fire
should be lighted on the hearth or in til,
furnace.
FEEDING STRAw-Straw, if properl,
managed. can be made to serve NOR
profitable purpose than mere littering, o
to add bulk to the manure pile. In Eng
land, and amongst the English farmers il
Canada, most of the bullocks are fed an,
fattened on straw, with roots and meal
No hay is used, that being kept for tn
horses. Thus larger number of stocl
can be fed. Straw cut wetted, and sprin
kled with ground feed or oil-meal, wi
carry cattle very well through the winter
Oat, barley, rye, and wheat straw are PFC
portiOnately valuable in the order i
which they are placed. Pea-straw is NOR
valuable than oat-straw.-Hearth an
Home.
ILLUSTRATIVE of the ups and downs G
this life in general, and politics in partit
ular, Thurlow Weed tells how some Me-
Workers raised fund to defeat Fillmor
in 1856, which was given to him for 'eil
dicious distribution" He placed $1O,0
in bank to the credit of his partner, to b
drawn out as it was needed. A few day
after, the latter dropped dead in I'll
street. The bank paid over the money
in due process of law, to the widow
year or two passed, and Mr.. Fillmore m,
and married the widow-and the 500
PoIsoN FROM LEAD WRAPPERS.
children in st. Louis, having displaye
symptoms of poisoning soon after eafin
Limburger cheese, led to an examination
II was discovered that the cheese did CO.
tain poison, but impaired by the wrapp,
in which it is always prepared for marke
The cheese in itself is innoxious, but it
enveloped in lead-foil wrappers, whie
are harmless until they come in conta
with liquid which will act upon them
dissolvent, in which case the LIQUID b
comes poisonous by taking up the lea,
The decomposition of this cheese ha
produced very strong acid, which can
IN contact with the poisonous wrappe
and then spread throughout the chees
thus poisoning the whole cake.
MANY of our readers have doubles
heard of the famous travelling stones {
Australia. Similar curiosities have r,
Gently been found in Nevada, which al
described as almost perfectly round, th
majority of them as large as walnut, an
OF an irony nature. When distribute
about upon the floor, table or other lew
surface, within two or three feet of eac
other, they Immediately begin travelin
toward common center, and there hue
die up in bunch like lot of eggs in
nest A single stone removed to di
tance of three and half feet, upon bein
released at once started off, with wonde
ful and somewhat comical celerity, t
join its fellows taken away four or fiv
feet it remains motionless. They al
found in region that is comparative
level, and is nothing but bare rocl
Scattered over this barren region are Ii
tie basins, from few feet to a rod or tw
In diameter, and it is in these that til
rolling stones are found. They are frol
the size of a pea to five or six inches
diameter. The cause of these stones ro]
ing together is doubtless to be found j
the material of which thew are comnose