Eaton weekly Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1866-1875, 1871-02-02

spell 'orse, then my name hain't 'Enry
| I'M .f17 ~ or ltft'i
People who are always fishing for
compliments do not need very long
lines. They will get their best bites in
shallow water. - fiitfl -"
The tenor Lefranc has a voice of re-
markable compass sort of mariners
compass, which guides his course over
tn high Cs. Ii1f n.
IT WAS a wise negro who, in speaking
of the happiness of married people, said,
" Dat 'ar 'pends altogedder on how dey
Joy deyselves" Ig 0y 1ao
HAVE you ever, broken a horse ?"
inquired horse jockey. No, not ex-
actly, but have broken three or four
wagons" uoiiaf g9Ii9 sg1Fi ad3
ONE of the papers, contains an adver-
tisement: Lost, a large black silk
umbrella, belonging 70 aogehtleman
with a curiously carved ivory head"
Ar A recent railway. festival, the fol
lowing striking sentiment was given
g Our Mothers-the only faithful ten
ders who never misplaced a switch"
TEE extravagant tendency Of the
present generation suggests TO clergy
man the inquiry whether it would not
be better to devote half of ones ener-
gies to learning to live on very small
income, than to devote all of ones en-
erges in struggling and waiting for
large income? -
B A UNIQUE Recommendation given by
Clergyman for "A friend who desired a
situation is as follows " He is perfectly
human, and has made some Of the
ablest mistakes that ever were made,
showing in their happening and in their
correctinga hopefuI, conscious and grow
ing manhood bncs - ,roaoi
A JUDGE of the Indiana Supreme
Court was accosted by the hotel boot
black, the other day, with demand for
% q quarter, sirf' He torned upon the
sable-hued American and Indignantly
asked him, What do you take me for,
sir2i HlOh know you; you're one Of
them rcan-can fellers,', pointing 70 the
Variety Theatre.
81 iTHk latest attempt 10 hurt the feel
inRs editorial is in this current story
Z" Are you connected with a paper bereT
asked countryman Of an inmate of the
Indiana Insane Asylum. "Oh, no" was
the reply 81 have been TO the insane
asylum and been cured; a man never
runs a newspaper after he is cured|
THERE is q story extant- Of an absent
man who had the toothache.
He was a quarry imam by profession, and
he concluded that the best way 20 rid
himself Of the afflicted tooth would be
to blast IL out. So he filed his mouth
ron tts s, eorner ,.r, ~ i get os,t f the rav
.s tLo-s.,,It WIZ u 1s,,,si ss;,v, -
- t' ~ t,,., l,
n sss,,-ed n T1as ve, s,,ecss.s,,l ~, fsr
~ a. ts>,,,l. - .-,sd h,,t LSto,,
tba Mont Cents t1,nneI chan went home
he General aspect of his mouth resem-
Mel chat of tbe Delaware gap.,- The
dentist says ne wouio not unoertake 70
at him w1th 2 SET OF teetn, OF the nsces-
sary size, forr less than a tnousano ool-
ars.
AN amusing story is told BY a sailor
Tho, in arecent combat, had the luck to
capture a Prussian, subaltern, On. the
Dad to Paris the lHtter asked his captor,
Who had been chafng him Numerically
IN the length of time the Prussians took
% reduce the city, " How do you fare in
rour capital n !" How do we fare2-why,
irst rate" was the reply. q Then your
,xen are not yet exhausted, as we iTnag-
ned, they sNereT' z Oxen lloh, they have
been eaten long since" " You have large
sheep then 2" No, indeed,
hey disappeared simultaneously. with
he bullocks." "Ah understand you
have still horses to fall back ori2 wish
We had jrNe deYoured them. long since"
What the devil do you eat, thenT was
he astonished inquiry. What do we
,at r. replied the sailor, with the greatest
gravity in the world "have you not
leard in your camp2S Mo- Why,
We eat our prisoners, of course, and find
hem delicious The young Prussian
'entnrat ~ I ro anotber ramart iii bis' arrival
I ~ dast;nat;on = b..
80 - \ go --,, -. s--.s------4l453ads o.
PRoTEcTIoN OF STo4E BY SALTS or, Cor
Robert, Of Paris, recommends
earnestly the use Of salts of copper, as
he best preseryatiVe against the wealth
ring Of stone IN a moist climate and
'ndeayors to prove that the wasting
way of sandstone and granite IS due
o various causes, one of the most i'm
)ortant Of which is the deyeloprneut OF
!. ichen (the Lepra Gnaqltitahsl. This
liant is so destructive that the beautiful
marble soulptures IN the park, at Yer
allies, would be completely destroyed
~ il, in the space Of fifty years, Unless
precautions were taken 70 arrest its
avages. DIR. Robert states that the
mount OF weetnering away OF rocks OF
Va kihos, ersiiiye hVe eleouJ n ,,-. Il'uon
'reater than She Puphc genernly arc
ware oI, esPecnlshy wren. Mnen su-yeo.Su 70
!, ne ~ ~ fitos1s
nus, tne oOe1isk 1ln OF LuAoT, WliiSSh WliSh W.
'rouBhI 70 Iar1s, lrOm HByPJ ,lolg
ears ago, mas Deeonae Hco.hpietey
)leacned out, ana iull OF small cfaoAhi