Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1871-10-24
sf sHE Vol. %, NO. u.
A Scene in an Editors Sanctum.

A Scene in an Editors Sanctum.
The Philadelphia Dispatch conde-
sends to perpetrate the following !:
"a week or two ago one of our
reporters had occasion TO refere to q
certain woman, whom we will call
Hannah Smith, as q denizen of the
Eleventh Ward. A day or two al
ter a huge man entered the office
with his brow clothed with thunder.
In his hand he carried fearful club,
and at bis side trotted bull dog,
whom hunger evidently had made
desperate. With that quick appre-
citation Of the situation which is cred
liable to the superior intelligence of
educated mon, the editor of this pa
per and the proprietor darted to the
window, climbed outside, slid down
the lightning rod, and went across
the street to watch the bloody afiray
through spy glass. With the fear
lessness of conscious innocence, we
sat still, merely inserting our legs in
two lengths of stove-pipe, to guard
against misrepresentation of facts on
the part of the bull dog. The man
with the club approached.
care you the editor ~ he asked,
splitting on his hand and grasping
his club. We told him the editor
was ont; that be had gone to the
North pole with Captain Hall, and
that ho would not return before 1876
in time for the centennial celebra-
ton.
"Arc you the proprietor asked
the man.
We explained to him that we were
not, that the proprietors were also
out that they had gone to South
America for the purpose of investi-
eating. the curative properties of
cundurango, and they expected 10
remain there for several years
"Well, whoever you are" exclaim-
ed the warrior, my name is Smith"
We told him we were glad BE-
cause, if there was one thing be Ter
than the possession of the name of
Smith, it was the privilege Of know
ing man of the name. But Smith, 4"
we said, "why this battle array ? 1t
is absurd for man TO put on the
pan0ply OF war, and rush into edit
ors sanctums, fumbing a club aud
accompanied by disheartenlng bull
dog, simply because his name hap
pens TO be Smith"
He said he called in to burst the
head Of the man who had insulted
his sister.
at is impossible, Smith, that such
thing could have been done by any
one OF this office"
"Is, but it was, though; and her
name was published, too. Miss
Smith-Miss Hannah Smith"
May I.be permitted to inquire, Mr..
Smith, what was the precise charac-
ter of the affront offered TO Hannah
"Well, you see," said Smith, 1.-THE
BLACKBOARD said he was denizen.
And | want you to understand" ex-
claimed Smith, becoming excited,
and brandishing his club in wild
manner over our heads, while the
bull dog advanced and commenced
TO sniff up and down our stovepipe !;
81 want you to understand that she
Is decent young woman, with a
good character, and noue of your dem
liens and such truck. The men
who says she is denizen is a black
guard aud thief, and Iii smash him
over the nose if | get a chance
They may say what they please
about me, but the man who abuses
my sister has got to suffer And
Smith struck the table in violent
manner with his club, while the bull
dog put his forelegs on the back of
our chair.
We paclfed Smith with dictiona-
ry. We pointed out to that raging
warrior that the Websterian dcfni-
ton Of the word "denizen" gives
such a person an unoffending charac-
ter, and deprives the term of any
thing like reproach. Smith said be
was satisfied, and he shook hands,
and kicked the bull dog down tairs.
The editor and proprietors, seeing
that all was safe, Immediately climb
ed the tightening rod, and soon ap-
peared at the window, and where
they were introduced to Smith, with
the remark that they had returned
from the North Pole and the cline
of the cundurango somewhat unex-
pectedly, in order to surprise their
relations
And now wo suppose Smith will
be mad because We have told this
story about him, and be will be com
ing down to interview US again in
wars magnificent stern array with
fresh bull dog. But it will be in
vain. We have rented an Office in
the top of the shot-tower, and have
planted torpedoes and spring guns
all the way up the stairs. We warn
this incendiary Smith to beware.