The weekly Ottumwa courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1857-1872, 1871-07-06
THE PATIENT MODE OF LIVING

~ AIN DOmotlmeS lOeJ In 0ollHnL 8b
read the confident and generous di
rections of some man who has solved
the problem of correct living, and
given his gospel to tho world. How
much better than any imagined mil
lenium will that be when we can
conform all our vile bodies to his
body; what o sweet uniformity
when we all eat and drink, and sleep
and dress, and exercise exactly as he
has found it best for him. The pro.
cess Of natural selection has been
carried quito far enough. Let us be
OF one mind and one dict; bran OF
one bran, flesh Of one flesh. We
shall all 60 to bed at one hour, and
that right early-except the editors
OF morning journals, who will have a
dispensatlon to die early. We shall
all rise, like a bed Of crocuses in
spring, at very early hour, and oil
together. Sickness will not excuse
us, forthere will be no excuse for
sickness. At the same time we shall
all be engaged in taking an dir bath,
q plunge bathc, sponge bath, . dry
rub; and then, dressing accrding to
o tabular set of figures, furnished by
the central authority, showing the
proper weight of each garment ac-
cording TO the temperature indicated
by the Thermometer, We shall all
take brisk walk of eleven minutes.
We shall saw wood for half an hour,
If we have no lifting machine, and
then sit down to breakfast, to con-
sist Of half pint of filtered water
free of all animal substances ) and
two quarters Of a dried apple, or any
other fruit in season. to be eaten with
the utmost cheerfalness, and even
with little moderate hilarity. A
dried apple without hilarity is to be
avoided. After breakfast, we are to
go to our various occupations with q
clear mind and an elastic frame.
By twelve o'clock we shall be quite
ready for dinner. This meal
is to be varied every day in the
week-different kinds of bran bread.
different kinds of cracked wheat,
different kinds of dried apples, and
other sorts of fruit that do not con-
tain certain kind of acid which is
hostile to the standard stomach of
the reformer whom we follow, to be
eaten with great deal of merriment
(no matter who has died, or who has
gone into bankruptcy(, to be eaten
IN large quantities. In fact, we are
to eat all we want at this king meal,
with ono restriction. We are to
leave off hungry and extremely hila-
rious. The dinner is not to cost over
eight cents, except you dine with q
friend, and he pays the bill, in which
case you may take sugar on your
fruit. After dinner you may take q
siesta of twenty minutes and nap
in your chair but do not lie down !:
and sleep with your mouth shut. in
fly time, for animal food is absolute.
ly prohibited. These directions.may
seem unimportant; but nothing is
trivial to an immortal man, as you
will feel when you go to your bust.
ness with an aspiring step, spark
ling eye, glowing cheeks, fire in
every limb, exuitant blood in every
muscle, and the consciousness that
you have no butchers bill, grocer's
bill. or milkman's, that you owe no
man dollar, and keep all the com
mandments just as easy as you can
wink. As yop walk along the street
you occasionally jump into tho air.
four or five feet, or leap over the
boundary fence and back, and laugh
aloud. At supper it is best for you
to eat nothing, except your own
checrfulness. But, if Nature will
have something, try a little brown
bread, raised without yeast, slowly
masticating it, thinking about butter,
and being careful to call up no image
that will induce excessive laughter );
for this is the timo TO begin to tran
quilize the mind and prepare for self
satisfied slumber.-Charles d. War
,ser.