The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1871-10-01
|.,,ing Star and Catholic Messenger.
,w 0SLxANs. SUNDAY. OcToRER !, ISL.
WIT AND wIsDoN.

Dol, creatures--Dairy maids.
n,be poor mans story-The garrett. -
The most famous spear-Shakespere' =
swesp.takesSsSs lpotaole food for sweeps
SotHheTA1AAgreat which 10 not right.
Matcksse smisef-A cigar with nothing
light It.
L A barber ia always ready to scrape an
ycQuaintance.
I A report that can't be contradicted-the
kport Of gun. Il
When is q clock ON the stairs dangerous'
ghen 1t runs down.
When we make an idol Of woman she
uaiiy becomes idle.
Some tailors would make capital Ora
Oons-they charge SO.
A desirable second hand article-A young,
| ch and amiable widow.
which is the largest room in the world
kbe room for Improvement.
sausaee-maker in Cincinpati adver-
ses his wares as "dog cheap"
Elmira rats don't know much. They
aoI shoe pegs and stow them away Tor
g u;s forehead extended to the gable-end
his neck" means thai he was bald
eaded. t'9 90 -. "t
The bravest man in the wcFsd-The man
tho talks of going to the seaside wishoos
liking his wife.
musical friend thinks that the first
;ece of music performed by Adam must
ave been WARNINGS at Eve"
An old LADY made the following speech
a woman,s meeting the other day :"l
emond equality for all the sexes"
A nrinter,s to asst: Woman-The fairest
,ort of ere ton, The edition being ex-
ens;ye, let no one be without copy.
At baby convention in Massachusetts
;fteen mothers were present, and on q vote
for the prettiest each baby got one vote.
What evidence ia there that there was
beer in the ark The kangaroo was seen
20 90 in with hops, aud bruin soon followed.
If YOU want to eat such q pudding as
xour mother made when you were boy,
you must somehow revive boys appetite
and palate.
A pound of turnip-seed contains three
hundred and one thousand two hundred
and eighty eight. If you don't believe 1t,
count them. ~.
sneaker at a recent public meeting con-
Guided his appeal by the remarkable warn
ing, "Remember, the eyes of the ror poput'
are upon you." .t -.
A shopkeeper having advertised ais stock
to be sold under prime cost, neighbor oo-
served that it was impossible for him to oo
so, as he had never paid anything for !,
himself.
A clergyman once posted the following
notice on the gate Of his church "Founo
two hats in my strawberry bed The ownel
don't believe the owners will call for them
A little school-boy presented his teache
the following note from home as an excuse
for hardness; Baby cross Biscuit TO bak'
| had no Bakin powders the dog upset TIL
kannhv not the cat licked the milk go
up late Excuse.
"You are very stupid, Thomas" said
country teacher to little boy eight year
old, 1You are a little donkey: and wha
do they do to cure them of stupidity I
"They feed them better and KICK theh
less,n said the arch little urchin.
A backwoodsman, finding himself on
night in the theatre OF border town, wner
the music was somewhat interrupted b
: the crying of baby, shouted out, Sto
1 them fiddles and let the child cry; hav
not heard such music these ten years"
A new definition of the word " civilizs
4 tom reaches MS from Japan. Lately,
\ Japanese visitor to the English club We
j induced to take some champagne, and Q
l putting away his third tumbler, exclaime
with great fervor, 81 like c'Vhiza1ion
n ike clVlllZlClOn IA
An ignorant fellow, DESTROYS of showing
ing Of in a company where the convers'
ton was of classical character, speakir
! of Leander crossing the Hellespont for
interview with Hero, designated the feat
"Leander swimming across the herrin
pond to see Nero"
That was a delightful economy for q MI
in the pit of New York theatre, who sc
! ing some people about to throw an oostr
porous fellow in the gallery over the "a
ing, and being much exasperated by o.
orchestra, cried ont loudly, I" Don't was
l him; kill the fiddler with him."
A rich but ignorant lady, who was AMI
tious that her conversation should be =.
to the transcendent style, in speaking
friend said recently, He is paragram
noliteness "Excuse me-" said gent
man sitting next to her, but do you !
mean a paralleiogram :" "Of course
mean a parallelogram, replied the Lac
chow could have made such an q"
mistaken
Some time since a young gentleman, "
known about town, went to consult 10
gentleman about carrying OF an heilt
3You cannot do it without danger" Q