Clarksville chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 186?-1872, 1871-01-28
AN IRONCLAD SERMON.
BY A TOUGH ALABAMA DIVINE.

BY A TOUGH ALABAMA DIVINE.
TExr-"And when they riz up airly In
the n,oInin. behold they wits NIL dead cor
pusses."
My brethring and slstering, 1 will
preach onto you this day, wind and
weather permittin, from the thirty
seventh chapter Nv Isaiath, thirty-six
verse, which reads as follows:
"As the destroyin angel smOte In
the camp us the Syrenians a nund-
red and fOurscOre All five thousand
men-an when they riz up airly In
the mornin behold they was all dead
cOrpusses."
An thus 1t IL, my beloved friends
and friendly hearers, that the destroy
In angel stalks abroad, ready to send
us to the bone-yard before we can rise
up in the mornin and s0t down to
break fast.
And it is said, my frens, that roses
Is red and viOlets blue, but it's no use
trying to honey-fugle round the An
gel Gabriel when he tOOts his horn
for you to hand In your checks an
prepar to git under dirt, fur you'll hev
to hunt your hole then, sartin.
can when they riz up airly In the
mornin, behold they was all dead
corpusses."
Ny wretched brethring and sister
ing, rs I was ridin along the road
one day, | seen q man settin on the
top his fence, with double-barrelesl
shot gun ON his lap, an n swettin an
II fnnnin NV hisself with an old straw
hat, an q cussin Nv the fourth Nv Ju-
ly an North America, an the COnsti-
tOotion, an the Supreme Court an the
President NV the United States, an
the Bird NV Liberty, an the Freed
mems Buro, an the tifteeth amend
ment; an when l hcarn that man q
cussin, an seen that big shotgun,
thinks l to myself, In the words NV
the text:
San when they riz up airly In the
mOrn:n, behold they was all dead
corpusses."
An tOle roam to wO, an sez Il:
"My ungotly fren, ef you swear In
that way you'll forever an etarnally
ruinate yer immortal soul an never
get nibble when you go tishin."
An seq he:
"You go to thunder, you burned
old mishapen, misbegotten mistake
NV creation! ef you had to git the
grass out Nv "a cotton crop with free
niggers, you'd git on u stump an cuss
yourself out NV your burned yaller
hide" .....
| Seq i:
"My erin fren, It cut me to the
marrer to see you strugglin in the
bondidge NV sin"
An seq he:
"My punkin-faced customer, ef you
can cline that tall red oak thar an
see anything in this mis'able land
but bOndidge an crab grass, you can
take my ole hat for hens nest"
An seZ |:
"My hard-swearin fren, I'm afeard
you'll never register yer name in the
book Nv eternal life."
And sez he:
al went to town last week to reg
lister, but couldn't git sight Nv the
book fur the Internal greasy niggers." "
"Oh, mistaken human!' seq |, al
trimble for your futur, for you ar on
the road "A leading to perdisliun."
And seq he:
"You are cussed old liar, for I'm
WI Ntit ibuu " ith'itlG w ibtitoh.
] hove sigh, and scz |, In the lang
widge NV my text:
"An when they riZ up airly in the
mOrnin, behold they was all dead
corpusses." .....
Aud he says: .. rr .r--.
"Let 'em rise, and the devil take
'em ALL" .t.r
"Oh, sufferin, fellow-creeter ~ seq
/, "ef you would but sue for grace,
ye might come an line the heyinly
quire, an be mancipated from the
shackles NV sin an 'scape everlastiii
perdishunw .I.s D..
An he cooked up his gun, an seZ he:
81 had twenty-siX likely niggers
mancipated on my hands, an ef you
open yer jaw-bone bout mancipa.
tion to be agin, III make bllzzard
/ vittles out'n yer Internal old carcass
quicker'n hell could scorch n gnat." ["
/ My constant frens an hearers, when
| seen that wicked man cooking NV
his gun, begin to feel mighty julius,
an the words NV my text smote upon
my ear: ...... ... .....
"An when they riz up airly In the
mornin behold they were all dead
corpusses,"
but, my Christian hearers, felt
called upon to try my hand once on
this poor ohjurit man, an scZI
My blasphemoos fren, you are con-
tinually and eternally damned efyou
don't come down of that ar fence, an
go TO some sequestered spot and pray
for your souls redempshun."
An shoore nutf he did jump down
Nff IA "A fs.t /.
sequestered spot, my ungodly hear
ers; he stuck that big ole double-bar-
relied shotgun close up to my revern-
cd head, and seq he
81 have hearn that n sequester was
the next thing to cOnfscator, an el
that's yer business In this here settle
ment you had better begin to grow
mighty small and beautifully less. -
d. An, my hearers, II looked 10 me rs
cf n drove oi mules could have trot-
ta1 tl,NNl, H., lurr.,l.. I.N fl,ut .r A I,