The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1871-07-22
VARIETY.

.,sf-Drink to me only with thine
h. called a suitor, when he don't
ii. secret''-her opinion of her hus.
s-eakiast and an india-rubber coat
"a dry all day.
there is no friendship between
N that one good looking young
t's to break up
- went into 4 music store and
clerk if he had Loving eyes. -
n pl told 80 by the girls
biued has a machine to make a
IN in the morning. A six months
20 to death
- mon seeing 4 squirrel shot from a
5,-itb and that's waste of powder.
4 would have killed the animal"
,-z;epIar swain in Huntington sent in
u the paper with the addition, "No
he said he despised authorizations.
IL 20 know how many friends you
/. ofice if you wish to know how
srpu haven't, get into trouble.
N knowledge is not thoroughly dis
schools. \ boy being asked
d: p vaguely responded, AN UNI
rinister, after repeating the story
fPJtiphar's wife, said there was not
ID the country that would not pro-
q D fool.
sryIe in which irreverent Chicago
neat revlvalist Elder Knapp,
I'D three sinners in I :261, will
|t Fiend next Sunday"
rper is indignant at cotempOrary
n that sMObIle is the fourth coffee
|shtry." Investigation proved that
Kas meant, but things got mixed.
5pIe in a New York village reprOyed
for famIliarities with their daughter,
d to them did make reply: You
bouncy about it, we've been married
kes YOUR cows so cross ?" asked an
Ikr miIkman. My cows cross
bean, MADAME" "Why, as your
i b0ur, l thought the cows must be
nper says: ga horse ran away yes
aOctOr ran, and a coroner ran, and
F, hlsO. The horse fell, the rider was
bctor had no case, the coroner no
.er had this paragraph, and that was
"a the runaway"
Nebraska was bOasting that In his
isn't either d dOcter, a lawyer, or a
NJ only one rum-seller. "How many
- there altogether - asked a. by
III" " was the reply, "there's only
4 my brother Jakes, and Jake is
aeon wishing to give his pastor a
'tFe juice into bis sermons, said to
Il must get q seat nearer the pull
q time your words reach my ears, the
Z. Of me have so taken the pith out
hey are as fat as dish-water."
in England being annoyed by
FASTING as to the superiority of Eng
y silenced laudatiOn by declaring
a girl in Boston only eleven years
s chew gum in seven different Ian
eyes shut"
* Democrat has this to say in res
tain theory "This theory that
%dant from a monkey may be all
rsOut, but if the monkeys have been
hrty which is in power for the past
q would be justified in committing
q serious charge to bring against a
fies to be good"
SEas talking to her father about her
q Just died. and said, Papa, will !
: back if ] pray God to let her Just
+eT' Her father told her that her |
'pot come back, but by and by she /
Der IN Heayen-that God wanted
would not have taken her; when |
y fer; hasn't God got any man.
mo go to see girls have adopted a |
<t ttaIning kisses. They assert, on |
scientific writer's, that the concus-
by kiss will cause the flame of n |
and easily induce the girl to ex-
81 interest of science. The first kiss
PES watch the flame to see it flicker.
a + 50 interested in the experiments
3 fr 1t 1t wants to. Try it yourself. |
b1ilard has come to the rescue
& q class OF young people known as
feacOns children, and who are Ion
= 10 be rather worse than the chill
9ple are. He declares that Of
'ers and deacOns there were more
4 1Iea over 10 years old, of whom
were hopefully pious, SO were in
hitting Tor II, and only 81 were
-'e tue great revivalist, was actively
wal OF religion down in Arka6.
oout to baptize a new convert he
2 -ouu voice: "Does any one know
:nls man should not be baptized ?''
i9e a long specimen of an Arkan-
Aogted IN response s.See here
uon { want to interfere in thar
~ yours, but if you expect to oct
~ that old cuss you will have To
~ 40 the river over night"
nref quoted the Miltonic coupIet
ne thou goddess, fair and FREE
zen Sciep'd Euphrosyne;
r -asure OF reading the next mo-
g stenographic transformation =
phe that gOdd IS, fair and free
en she erspt, and froze her knee
-eman, after having paid his ad-
q lady for some time, popped the the
'A1y' IN frightened manner said
sur The gentleman did noi
. tne iaay, and consequently re.
;9H's hme' when she exclaimed,
g Gele, says the MaquOta Qowa,
IA, d. " 'ne Clinton county District
=, -, 4 well dressed young man
80 IT. was summoned by the
lie objected, but it was no |
.ne law said "in the name of |
'o1 are hereby commanded, !"
- Upon entering the court, the |
1T n u to the Judge and whis-
&. conrs nue Judge smiled audibIy, and
= that the young man had a |
- Hls pocket, and that a deten-