The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1871-11-26
h ,Tning Star and Catholic Messenger.
80 oRIEANs. SUNDAY. NOVEMBER %. isn.
WIT AND WISDOM.

WIT A0O WIbUO0. ,-s
Walking smcks-Ptomenading swells.
A Regular Mystifcation.-Being caught
in fog. L..
saves nine.
An early spring-Jumping out OF bed at
fonr o'clock in the morning.
e Necessity knows no law" Well, me-
.e.sity is like great many lawyers.
IF small boy 10 called q Glad" 10 1T
nroper ,to call a bigger boy "ladderf !"
Won NAV find fashions in town. but you
.,aat with more stiles, in tho county
Judy. "a
Question for Etymologists.-Do the
"roots of words" produce "howers OF
speech I"
Why is an omnibus-strap like conscience
pecanse il ia an inward check on the OUT
ward man.
"a WAC asks. stWhen will the Presidential
oEa;r he like the moon I" When there IL
man in it.
WHY are our sidewalks in orange season
like music If you do not Z sharp 20"
will will flat.
1,ba seats of members of Congress have
been raised several inches as the only pos
able way of elevati1g their occupants
An avaricious man, after having kindled
bis fire. stuck q cork in the end OF MS pei
i 1i,n a. tn ave little wind that was left in
them.
ron ever been baptised Z" Small Heathen.-
< on, yes, Mum; I've the marks mere on
nv arm"
A despairipg swain, in fit of despera-
+;on. recently declared to his unrelenting
lady-love that it was his firm intention to
drown himself or perish in the attempt.
If the sun is going down look u to the
.tars :: if the earth is dark, keep your eye
on heaven with Gods presence and God's
promises man may always DO cneerf"i.
local poet indicted sonnet to his mis-
treas. entitled, 81 kiss her sub rosa.n The
comnositor krew better than that, and set
| it mn in printers latin, ~ kissed her snub
nosa."
Nervous old lady Ito deekhand on steam
boat)-" Mr.. Steamboat man, is there any
fear Of danger Z" Deck Hand (carelessly)-
"a Plenty of fear, ma'am, but not DIT OF
danger"
"Tbat's q fins strain, )" said one old gent
to another, abiding to the tones OF ain :,
was the reply, "but IL he strains ""cn
more he'll burst"
"My brethren" said Swift, in sermon,
"there are three sorts of pride-of birth, OF
riches, and of talents. 1 shall NOT speak OF
the latter, none of yoa being liable to that
abominable vice."
There was once an Independent old lady
who, speaking Of Adam's naming all the
animals, said she didn't think he deserved
any credit for naming the pig-any one
would know what to call him.
Deacon .Jones.--"How is it that Parson
ilongbreve, who is, the LATEST manin the
world, manages to write such long ser
mons 2" "WeH. brother Jones, think IT'S
because when he gets agoing he Is TOO lazy
10 STOP"
One watch set right will do to try many
by but, on the other hand, one that goes
wrong may be the means of mlsle4dlng a
whole neighborhood: And the sane may
be said of the example we individually se'
To these around US.
j A man presented his wife with block
of wood as token of admiration. She
Received it on the forehead, and was 80
overcome by gratitude that she tainted
Iaway. The generous husband has also
Egiven five pounds to the police.
AS a companion to the song. ooh give me
back but yesterday a melody will soon be
ISSUED, entitled, ooh, could you spare to.
morrow which will be followed by You
haven't got such thing as next week
about you, have you = They will undoubt
ed become immensely popular.
"Boys," said a school teacher the Other
day, "what is the meaning Ing Of fall all th h;
who is initiating locomotives" "Comt
up here, William" said the teacher. g!
you are turned into a locomotive, it is higi
time you were switched off,"
A certain judge having been called on q
% public meeting for song, regretted tina
It was not in HE power to crafty the com
pany. A wag who was present observed
Vie was much surprised at the refusal, q
was notorious numbers had been trans
prted by his voice.
Unprotected female (awaking an oil
ent who is not very welI-"O, Mister
build yon~ End the Captain I'm sur
Ere in danger. I've been watching tina
In at the wheel; he keeps turning
bund first one way and then the Other
q evidently doesn't know his ow
nd"
the following is verbatim copy of a let
t1receptly received by a schooimaster i
ii north from householder in the sam
nshborhood "Cur, ass, you are a man {