Tama County Republican. (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1867-1872, 1871-07-27
Womans' View Of Expectoration.
WHICH CONCERNS RuxrSAr1sc ANIMALS.

'1n the fourth century . powerful but
pervsrse ssctary imbibed the idea that the
air was filled with unholy lsgions, and that
it inhaled dc vils at every breath. Brood
ing over this fantasy, it gradually became
to him the most important and reasonable
Of truths, and he started . new heresy.-
that Of the Messalians made split
ing religious exercise, in the hope Of cast
ing ont the devils thus breathed in. In
travelling in our steamboats, and railway
cars. one sometimes suspects that this belief
has numerous American disciples, IS it Is
the only religion whose rites are thsre
scrupulously observed, ynl ~ the constant
invocation of its worshippers appears to be
Expectoration, heavenly maid descend!'"
E. P. WHIPrLE.
1t must be SO, otherwise what does
it mean? Or is it with men as with
horned cattle that always keep a cud
in their mouths. "If the creature
happens to lose its cud," says DR..
Holmes on the authority OF his bucol
ic friends, II. must have an artificial
one given it, or 1t will pine, and per-
haps de" Is the quid as necessary
to man as the eud to horned cattle ?
Can he discover no qnid pro quo for
his present disgusting habit? How
much more of beast is he in his
qm,d- -dities than horned cattle IN their
cud dlties! Who ever saw q four.
legged animal expectorate e.? They
ruminate without detriment to the
green carpet beneath their feet,
while two osslegged man carries ruin in
his trail. Better Shiny hippopota
mus or ventilated kerosene tank
tor travelling neighbor than great
American splitter!
In steamboats, you can escape the
rain OF terror. Illuminating animals
have a cabin to themselves, where.
planting their feet on the stove, they
can in mute conclave "spit round
soc,able." But tie hair. breadth
'scapes by flood in cars are os na-
turc to try the patience of Job him
self. Like the course OF Empire.
Westward Expeetoration takes its way,
ard the farther you leave the Allan
tic Ocean behind you, the nearer you
are to an ocean of another color, that
is by no means favorable to naviga-
tion. To champion chewers the floor
OF a car is one vast spittoon, and he
is the hest fellow who covers the
greatest amount Of surface. What
their aim will be it is impossible to
calculate, for they fire as wildly as
did our friend Winkle when he aim
ed at rocks and brought down Tup-
mans arm. There are chewers who
do "a neat thing" in expectoration,
hitting q stove at ten PAGES, but they
are rare. The common variety pur-
sue an irregular method Of warfare
and are as Indifferent to pub
l,c opinion as il public opinion
had never existed. They do not
seem to know that they are not mod
els of department. Sometimes l
feel just like pitching those tobacco
chewing fellows out Of the window"
said a conductor OF through" sleep
ing car, not long ago. I'VE go to an
awful sight OF expense getting mp
these cars, and just to head off these
fellows we put a big splttoon in ev-
cry section, but it do MT do one par
ticle of good. Whenever they can
choose between new. velvet carpet
and spittoon, darned if they do mt
make for the carpet! I was tickled
enough the other day. One Of those
chcwers was at it, and getting tired
OF his own side Of the car, he took
to firing in the aisle, and the lady IN
the opposite seat began to gather up
her skirts. Finally he got so near
that she could mt stand it any longer.
Mister" SAID she, "where do you
live when you are at homo? p
with my wife,"
"Do you keep houses'
Eyes"
"What sort Of house is it,"
"Very nice house"
"Do you spi: about it as you arc
splitting about in this car ?"
Eyes. madam; I do as I please in
my own house"
"Then, sir, I advise you to stay at
home, for people who do mt please
to be decent, ought never to be per-
mitted to travel"
"Well, I never say fellow 50 tax