The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1871-03-09
Cupid Knocked out Of Time.
A AMoTHER-IN-LAw,s AGILITY

a Etf-lN-AAs w . <1OAAAA
Peter Simpkins and Maria Nipkins,
after a courtship of nearly two years,
during which, time they had been ac-
customed to look upon each other as
the mortal embodiment of all angelic
virtues into one matrimonial whole,
and create miniature paradise for
themselves in comfortably turnlsh-
ed heuse not far rfrom--Well, tis not
necessary to mention the exact local.
ity. One morning soon after they
had been united in the holy bonds OF
holy matrimony, the brave Peter and
the fair Maria were standing upon
the deck of noble vessel-all vessels
are noble-leaning upon the rail, and
gazing upon the calm, placid waters
"Peter, dear Peter ! said Maria rails
ing her loye-lit eyes to the beamlng
countenance OF her happy husband.
e.Maria, dear Maria!" sighed Peter,
flashing his beaming countenance be-
fore her love-lit eyes.
GLOW calm and placid flows this stream,
Beneath the SUMS bright. beauteous beami'
spouted Maria, who was of pcetical
turn of mind.
"What a beautiful thought" ex-
claimed Peter, as he gaZed with rap
ture upon the fair Maria.
"You will always love me, won't
you, Peter darling ?"
Peter Simpkins was about to invoke
the gods to witness his vows of fidel-
ity, when he was, unfortunately, in
terrupted by gruff voice demanding
his tickets. Thus it will be seen thai
at the outset their matrimonial sky
presented clear, bright appearance
| Rut clouds at times will hide the rur.
est horizon and shroud the earth in
gloom. AT the end of the week, Mr.
| Simpkin's business not allowing hin
a longer absence, they retdrned from
their wedding tour and entered into
the possession of the little paradise
before alluded to. Now, in creating
this paradise, it, had never entered th'
mind of Mr.. Simpkins that other thai
angels would seek admittance to II
But 'ere many days of their primitive
conjugality had elapsed they wer
surprised with the visit of a vulga
mortal, in the person of Maria's mann
ma Now Maria's mamma was
woman of much weight, fitting tn
scales at something over thirtee
stone and bearing a countenanc
equally as formidable.
My dear Maria! My darlin
child! !" cried mamma as she darte
forward and snatched Maria from tn
arms of her adoring Peter and CLASP
ed her within her own.
Now Peter had always had horro
of his formidable mother-in-law, bl
D had consoled himself with the val
thought that when he and Maria wei
one they should live alone, free fro
the shadow or substance of mothe
u in-laW. Strange Hallucination! a
if such thing were possible! AS
mothers-in-law were ever to be g
rid of.
8 "Why, Peter, haven't you got
word to say to me, after so long
y absence?"
Peter, who had been vainly endea
oring for more than five minutes
t. get a word in, ventured to rema
that he was extremely gratified at
holding Maria's mamma-and ment
- ly added that he would be extreme
Il gratified if he could kick her do1
stairs. bias eg98 8ez lreE !.
"And now, my DEAR" said MANN
releasing Maria and extending
fore finger of her right hand, like @
in authority: 81 wish to ask yo'
r.. question, and 1 have no hesitation
asking it before Peter, because y
are now both my children equally,
Maria more SO, being my own fl
and blood, and it is natural thf
should feel more interest for her; /
* nevertheless, wishing you both W
and hoping as how l shall never hi
cause for thinking otherwise, whi
DE I am sure, would be distressing to
parties alike, but more especially
to parent, and that parent mot
who has natural sympathy for
understands the-the-But as l 8
J, l have a question to ask you, Ma
49, and that question is, has Peter tres
e you well?"
Peter looked at Mrs. Nipkins '
mingling of awe and wonder:
ria assured her mamma that Pc
behavior, thus far, had been unex
'ods tionabie.
" TAAf ffhis annonnesmentM Maria's II
sfaEE