The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1871-10-27

DOmcStlC Ille iS Wouoh . ophoAS
II Is there that she is most usefully aud
most appropriately employed But So
clety, too, feels her influence, aud owes
to her, in great measure. its balance and
its tone. She may be here a corrective
of what is unruly, restraint on what
Is indecorous. Her presence may be
pledge against impropriety and excess,
check on vice, and protection to
virtue. And It Is her delicacy which
will secure her such an influence, and
enable her to maintain it.
Dolicacy is, indeed, the point of honoi
in woman. And her purity of maHher
insuros to her Difference, and repfesso5
more efiectually than any otbef lhiiu-
ence, impropriety of every Kind a
delicate woman, too, will be more loved
as well as more respected, than any
other for affection aln scarcely be ex-
cited, and certainly cannot long subsist,
unless 1t is founded on esteem. Yet
such delicacy is neither prudish nor in
sipid. Conversation, for instance, is
one great source of a woman's influence
and IL Is her province, and peculiar
talent, to give zest to it. She is, and
ought to be, the enlivener of society !;
If she restraints impropriety she may
promote cheerfulness and 1t is not be-
cause her conversation Is innocent that
it need therefore be dull. The charm
of conversation is feeling; forgetting
one'sself,and sympathizing with others.
1t is not to shine, but to please, that a
woman should desire.
A woman should be elegant, not only
in manner but in mind. Manner is, in
deed, generally symtomatic but, as it
may be artificial, ii is no sure criterion
of mental grace. 1t is the latter which
is essential to true beauty. Without it
the iairest form disappoints and wearies.
1t Is the radiance that sets off every
other charm aud sheds on each its ap-
propriate hue. 1t is tint and proper
tion. Yet it is more easily understood
than defined, and better felt than ex-
pressed. 1t is n criterion of elegance.
The modes Of fashion are entirely con-
ventional, and are often ungraceful
as they are capricious. But breeding
is quite a different thing. 1t is unob-
trusive and dunpretending. 1t is always
selfpossessed and at ease; for it knows
its own place and Its own relations, nor
are its attentions ever troublesome.
Yet this quiet and lady-like department
though it seems to employ no effort is
by no means an easy or q common at
tainment. On the contrary, we often
see women who have lived much in
society very deficient in this criterion
of grace. And we can quite understand
the remark of really well-bred woman
on a candidate for fashionable society /:
Yes; she is very pretty, and very
pleasing, but she wants repose."
Elegance Is nature, but not rude ma
ture it is unaffected but not unpol-
ished. 1t copies natural grace, and
corrects natural defects. Yet it is no
servile imitator for it studies suita-
bility as well as simplicity. 1t does
not, for instance, imagine that what is
very pretty and playful in a girl of
fourteen is equally becoming at thirty
Least of all does 1T indulge in that rail
lery, which is piquant only because it
is personal, and which amuses in pro-
portion as it annoys. 1t has a respect
for the feelings, and a tenderness oven
for the faults of others and as it never
wounds, so does it never invite aggres-
sion. 1t implies, too, feeling; and here
again does it differ from the polish of
the world. Selfshness is the bane of
fashionable life. Every one is there
cold, for every one is selfish.