The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1871-11-15
Grammar SCIioai Extraordinary.

Teacher-What is that, sir?
Pupil Man is common noun of the
feminine gender; common, cause he
can he bought cheap, and feminine
gender because hes always got women
on the brain; eighth person, because
lis wife and six children come first is
IN the objective case and governed by
Il woman.
Tc&c:cr-Go to yourseat and put q
wet cloth on your head.
Teacher-Next, parse woman.
Pnli'-Woman is female noun of
the masculine gender.
Teacher-Mercy OF us what do you
say, sir7
Publishes female noun OF the
masculine gender; masculine, 'cansc
she wears the brcechaloons and is de-
teimined to vote; she's compounded of
cotton, whalehone, starch, smiles, sun
shine and thunder-cloud is in the
first person, cause she is always the
person speaking plural number, be-
cause she makes more noise than half
Il dozen parrots; is in the objective
case and governed by the fashions.
TeacLer-Sit down and rinse your
month with prophyiactic acid.
Tcacher-Ncxt, parse boy.
pupil-Boy is an uncommon noun of
the soslin gender and female persua-
sior.
Teacher-Thunder and blackjacks |!
What is that, sir9
Pupil-Boy is an uncommon noun of
the goslin gender and female persua-
sion; uncommon, cause he's hard to
find Eow-a- days; cause he soon enters
the threshold of goosehood; female
persuasion, cause he's always got the
heart sick about some female; first
person, big Ike; singular number,
cause there's nobody but himself; in
the objective case and governed by his
embryo mustacle, Scheiham scl,napps,
ard the length of his daddy's purse.
Teacher-Go home, sir, and battle
your feet in mustard.
Tcacher-Nrxt, Parse girl.
Pupil-Girl is an angelic noun of the
Grccian bend gender, and masculine
tendencies.
Tcachcr-Savc us from sudden death /!
These boys will never be raised. How
is that, sir ?
Pupil-Girl is an angelic noun, cause
she paints her checks aud loves inguns;
she's compounded of cosmetics, flow
ers, fuss and feathers; is of masculine
tendencies, 'canse she wears shirt bo-
SONS. paper collars, and always has
her head fnll of boys; singular num-
Der, cause the boys are afraid of them,
and matrimony is played out; third
person, cause she's much spoken of;
III the objective case and governed by
a gypsy bonnet.
Teachcr-Next, parse fashion.
Pupil-Fashion is Il tyrannical noun
Of the common gender.
Teachcr-Catiish and blunderbuses.
| What's that, sir9
| Pupil-Fashion is tyrannical noun,
'canse it mast be obcyed. and laughs at
Il poor mans purse; common gender,
cause all people must bow to it; it is
compounded Of fiounces, himsies, ruff
fcs, scuffles, bubbles, troubles, ruffs.
cuffs. suuifs, higylcs, giggles, singles,
curls, fulls, hairs, snares, Grecian bend,
fuss and feathers. 1t was once in the
objective case and governed by Eu-
genie. but it is now In the nominative
case independent.
Teacher-Go home, sir, and go to bed
Tcacher-NeXt, parse baby.
Pupil-Bahy is an obstrcperous noun
of the neutcr gender.
Teacler-Moses and the prophets,
save lis from destruction! What do
you say, yon little imp7
Pupil-Baby is musical noun cause
| it sings Il soft tune between midnight
and day, specially of a cold night; ii
is neuter gender, 'cause it is neither
male or female till it is big enough to
wear breaches. 1t weighs according to
size. and measures according to pro-
portions it is compounded Of milk and
lungs, and specially of lungs; grows at
u rapid rate. 1t is also of the spoilt
gender, cause it is allowed to put its
foot in the gravy whenever it plcases
is in the objective case and governed
BY candy and sugar plums.
Teacher-Go home, sir, and tell your
mother to rock you to sleep.
Teacher--Next, parse matrimony.
Pupil-Matrimony is an ancient
noun, defunct gender.
Tcacher-Hear him! You little vag.
ahOnd, what do you say7
Pupil--Matrimony is of the defunct
gender, cause it's played ont. Girls
are as plentiful as blackberries, but
they've got nothing. Matrimony is
compounded of the words mate and
money, but when there's match now.
a-days, it is nothing without the
/ nv