The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1871-03-18
VARIETY.

80, thing out-an aching tooth.
a;i.s;on is the footprint of faith in the
" Of sorroW-
is a woman.
! riding a donkey what kind of fruit do
>.present? \ pear.
s.. are Cashmere shawls ike deaf people =
4 vo,1 can't make them here
Il N IA the difference between church organ
=-1 the influenza ?-One stops The nose, and
utber k,l0tcs the stops.
,,aiI of 4 western poet: :" 'Tis sweet to
"A but oh : how bitter to court gal and
pt git her.
r,oks are. as poets call them, the most
r. things in nature, what are they always
Iring about? @
bebeIor editor, who had a pretty sister, re-
wrote to another bachelor, equally fortu-
Please exchange.
i Ranadian hotel once had a sign in the read
~, thus: Gentlemen learning to spell
!. ease take yesterdays paper"
- Anthony thinks the woman's suffrage
+. / now safe, because it has passed the first
1<|p pf e5sry reform, namely-ridicuie.
kdys dress-maker Mortified her the other
81 telling her she would g. cut her body
IN the course of the afternoon.
4 eame near selling my boots the other day" I"
tuttIe to friend. '' How so?" /" Well,
them half-sold." - O.
fit once asked peasant what part he per-
in the great drama of life. - / mind my
Business" was the reply.
little boy, returning from Sabbath school,
70 his mother, This cat-e-chism is too
. Amt there any kitty-chism for little boys?
Bon proposes that grand international ex-
y OF industrial arts be held in the United
"a the year 1916, - commemorate. the CEN.
anniversary Of the country.
harming young lady of Council Bluffs sur
her mother on returning from a dance, by
! that she enjoyed the '' hugging set to
amazingly" She referred to waltzing.
futleman travelling on a steamer, one day,
per was making way with large pudding
", when be was told by the servant that it
4essert. - Ii matters not to me-" said he,
build eat it if it were a wilderness. ~
wife of certain Boston writer thinks it
biee to have an author for a husband
eyer she feels restless he reads her some
De has written, and in a few minutes she is
fosound and refreshing sleep.
pay, boy, Is there anything to shoot around
4 inquired = Sportsman Of boy he met,
replied the boy, " nothing Just about
SEt our schOOl-master is just over the bill
:f1t;ng bIreh-rOds you might walk up and
over" - 4
London Cosmopolitan proposes the follow
-arriage vow for its lady readers, when
|n requires: - viii continue To love NV
p 50 long as he is lovable, honor him 30
be remains honorable, and obey him so
p his Commands are just and reasonable" "
Dap who used to loaf around a sancturn.
2fn "a bill from the editor amounting to SI3O:
7nishment the fellow made his way to the
pa demanded the items ne got both in
on and hint on being told that it was
.-nonths - rent and bored biIl.'' -
lark Twain's autobiography, which he has
IN imitation OF the other great men, his
efs say It Il, ON the whole, a model
'ion; yet It Is Of that nature that some
may simply indulge IN laughter at the
instead VI deriving from ii the lessons of
"a wisdom which it Is intended to convey.
'ooiosraphy is accompanied by the authors
'e'' and the satires beautifully illustrated.
Heoufgh clergyman called on Edwin
lia asked him If there was side door by
Strictly moral man could get into tile
70 see hlu play " Romeo" Booth put
y hamletest expressi5n and told the elder
a5, "aSu any side door to the show but what
hi ~ .ooS 20 and see such jackasses as the
q n.'eHn'h: The elder concluded to
L s' Lst'olIns with friend through coun-
( IF ,rE;aL esiled attention to a grave, the
a 49, sntI :, ,'ad 10 name or inscription on it.
a.s - Is the grave of the once
81 ~, -o'er' ,S.N AF- R. You will OBJ
.tons e IRE no name recorded on the
4 rr;a,. , 'le l think L could suggest a very
4, ,a 5p epitaPh.' What would YOU
4, ,.,..4 lH4Sired y. his friend. UuitiuQ for
"1"tP p was the reply.
Esntleman 'ss sent his Irish servant m b his his
=, a pair OF boots, and at the same time |
II. ), De sure to get mates, as there were
tv,, 1'ef IN the closet. Patrick returned
II "a VOotS, but odd ones. WHY. didn't |
II -. tlese are not alike? one Is a lope |
r., ue o'her short one,' sa id the gentle |
-. =. Patlence with the fellow - Bedad /
sO' sO, ), said Pat, in apology, " and it's thrue
'-' 'n'h the other pair was jest 50 tool''
'Is5a Aa DEVELOPMENT OF RELIGIoa.=In the |
a. etA was offered in the Missouri |.
~ 70 incorporate - Northern - Metho- I
aDd;S Sratz Brown, the recently success
"i@te ior Governor, advocated the bill |
At ioree Of prejudice. Whereupont
thar was excited against Gratz. so far, |
ounter ts:s fsa1: were uttered against his life.
et besrt. leesl,ng os also got up.
vo-,rt1 = " Tue SlethOdists had been touebed
5TJng anu ;E orators eloquent advocacy of their
\ brave man nSm99oasmen, S9 who naturally
' "een eaptiEated by his +
si1 n9sn tech ha'r O. that vonno u.n,s
s'a a stalWsrt old farmer fro% Iasnos sn
1. not a bar o. his head Nv Ia
l. : =, a Methodist. an she % irisa III .o tn. Lily
"a 10, ., but she died too soon r. - a.. maze
! rur t%se ae much religion, but I'm b blamed % Of
!. ihs, & enough H1r to shoot anybody 'at'tempts S
'Oher,!y Young man as spoke 50 in f,vor Of
ht p1oL ennreh. Her prayers have dons
much good anyhow. s'e eons