The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1871-06-29

must have an especial dread Of levees and
presentations. The monotony must be kill
ing; at the very best, irritating. George ~
had the stately dreariness very much relieved.
On one occasion, when a nervous gentleman
was bowing and passing before him, q
lord in waiting kindly whispered to him,
kiss hands, J" The nervous gentleman ac-
cordingly moved on to the door, turned
round, and there kissed his hands airily to
the king by way Of kindly farewell. George
~ laughed almost as heartily as his brother,
King William, did at an unlucky alderman
who was at court on the only day Mr.. Julian
Young ever felt himself constrained to go into
the royal presence. The alderman's dress
sword got between his legs as he was back
ing from that presence, whereby he was
tripped up and fell backward on the floor. King
William cared not fig for dignity. He re-
marked with great glee to those who stood
near, ''By Jove! that fellow has cut
crab" and the kingly laughter was, as it were,
poured point-blank into the fioundering alder
man. This was not encouraging to Mr..
Young, who had to follow. As newly-ap-
pointed royal chaplain in Hampton Court
Palace Chapel, King William had expressed
wish to see him at levee, and obedience
was duty. The chaplain had been told by
Sir Horace Seymour that he had nothing to do
but follow the example of the gentleman who
might happen to be before him. The prin-
cipal directions to the neophyte were, Bow
very low, and do not turn your back on the
king" The instant the chaplain had kissed
the kings hand, however, he turned his back
upon his sovereign, and hurried off. Sir
Horace Seymour afterwards consoled him for
this breach of etiquette by stating that q
Surrey baronet who had followed him made
q wider breach in court observance. The un-
lucky baronet, seeing the royal hand out
stretched, instead of reverently putting his
lips to it, caught hold of it and wrung it
heartily. The king, who loved joke, proba-
bly, enjoyed levees, the usual monotony of
which was relieved by such screaming-farce
incidents as these.
Those royal brothers, sons of George III,
were remarkably outspoken. They were not
witty themselves but they were now and
then the cause of wit in others. 1t must have
been the Duke of Cumberland who (on listen
ing to Mr.. Nightingale's story of having been
run away with when driving, and that at a
critical moment he jumped out of the car
riage) blandly exclaimed, 'Fooll fool"
''Now," said Nightingale, on telling the Incl
dent to Horace Smith, 'it's all very we'll for
him to call me a fool; but 1 can't conceive
why he should. Can you?" ''No!" reioined
Horace, 'I can't, because he could not sup
pose you ignorant of the fact"
Among the most unhappy lords of them
selves who lived in a past generation, there
was not one who might have been SO happy,
had he pleased, as the author of ''Vathek." 1t
is very well said of Beckford that there has
seldom existed a man who, inheriting so
much, did SO little for his fellow-creatures.
There was a grim humor in some of his ac-
tions. In illustration of this we may state
that when Beckford was living in gor-
geous seclusion at Fonthill, two gentlemen, who
were the more curious to spy into the glories
of the place because strangers were for
bidden, climbed the park walls at dusk, and
on alighting within the prohibited inclosure
found themselves in presence of the
lord of the place. Beckford awed them
by his proud condescension. He politely
dragged them through all the splendors of his
palace, and then, with cruel courtesy, made
them dine with him. When the night was
advanced he took his involuntary guests into
the park, bidding them adieu with the re-
mark that, as they found their way in, they
might find their way out. 1t was as bad as
bandaging mans eyes on Salisbury Plain,
and bidding him find his way to Bath. At
sunrise the weary guests, who had pursued
fruitless voyage of discovery all night, were
guided to point of egress, and they never
thought of calling on their host again.
Ready wit in women (now passed away)
wit, too, combind with courage, is by no
means rare. During the ruro-diabolical reign
of ''Swing," that incarnation of ruffianism, in
the district, with a mob of thieves and MUIR
derers at his back, attacked Fifeld, the old
family residence of two elderly maiden ladies
named Penruddock. When the mob were on
the point of resorting to extreme violence,
Miss Betty Penruddock expressed her aston
ishment to the ugly leader of the band that
''such good-looking man as he should be cap
tain of such an ill-favored band of robbers.
Never again will 1 trust to good looks !"
cried the old lady, whose fattery so touched
the vanity of "Swing" that he prevailed
some beer" he said, land we won't touch
hair of your head" ''You can't" re-
torted the plucky old lady, 'for l wear
wig!" On the other hand, the vanity of
young ladies was once effectually checked at
Hampton Court Chapel. A youthful beauty
once tainted, snd the handsome Sir Horace
Seymour carried her out On successive
Sundays successive youthful beauties tainted
and the handsome Sir Horace carried them
successively out, till he grew tired of bearing
such sweet burdens A report that in future
all swooning nympbs would be carried out
of the chapel by the dustman cured the cpl
demic.
Much has been said of the ladies of Liam
gollen, Lady Eleanor Butler and Miss Pom
sonby. We question if in all that has been
written of those pseudo-recluses they have
been half SO well hit off as by Mrs. Morris,
lodging house keeper in the neighborhood.
81 must say Sir, after all, observed Mrs.
Morris, ''that they were very charitable and
cantankerous. They did deal of good, and
never forgave an injury" There is some
thing of the ring of Mrs. Poyser in this pithily
rendered judgment. Quite as sharp a pas
sage tuIns up in the person of an eccentric
toIl-keeper, Old Jeffreys, who was nearly des-
! A.A-- W.