Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1871-03-17
is, TENN: FRIDAY EVENING MARCH r. 1871

y
twenty summers, with sandy caterpillar
on his upper lip, sat close TO her on the
sofa, with his arm around her slender
waisti Mr.. Editor, excuse the express
sion, but Imade straight coat-tail
home, you bet. became very morose
after that, and raved about the incon-
stancy of woman, and did not fall in
love again till was sixteen. To make
long story short, was Tilted again
and woefuily laughed at by the boys as
well as the girls and old ladies. Another
interval followed before began seriously
to think of matrimony. At twenty j
was ashamed Of myself that / was not
married. So set about courting in
earnest, not that | had not been in
earnest all my life; it was the con-
founded girls that would not be in
earnest with me. But now fair-haired,
blue-eyed little fairy told me was the
personification of all her brightest fan
ces of lover, She said | was SO
talented, so handsome and all that sort
Of thing. Marry me, Of course she
would | went home moreon my head
than on my feet. And now, Mr.. Editor,
hold your ear close down, and don't for
the world tell what / say, and try to un-
derstand me- Did you ever have a
mother2 OF course you had; most
men have at some period of their
lives. Well, not to be all innocent-for
mine was good mother, and is in
Heaven now-but just between us and
the gate post, amt mothers at some in
teresting times in boys lives great bOresf
Well, / told the story of my love in
glowing words. | was in the third
heaven of bliss; Cynthiana Maria was
an angel and | was her proper mate. j
raved and shouted poetry till l lost my
breath, and then the prosaic, matter-of-
fact old lady said; My son, all that is
very fine, but what do You expect to
live on?" Here was a wet blanket with
a vengeance. | will not be tedious.
Another long gap of time passed. |
found myself grown entirely indifferent,
and those that would have ] couldn't
get, and those that would have me the
ancient Harry wouldn't have.
Lately | have been thinking that /
ought to marry, and raise up a respecta-
Bile family. Your solid men are all mar
ried men; members of the town coun-
ell, deacons in churches, school commits
are all married. | have
lately brushed up nay old store clothes
and gone into society; but | cut woful
figure there. Why at the last ball |
put on my pigeon-tail blue coat, lemon
colored vest and black pants--the regu-
lar Beau Brummel costume and went.
expected to meet old acquaintance
that / used to see in the old Wilson
saloon; when entered, either the lights
we're dim or something was the matter
| could see nobody knew. Some little |
girls that / had dandled on my knees
when they were babies, run up to me
with their heads filled with bristly stuff,
and asked if it was possible Uncle
Simon had come to a BALL One
little mink asked me if danced the
round dances. l said, "0h, yesP for in
my time they used to say hands all around
and | thought she meant that, though
my knees felt rather stiff for such an
Whereupon she famili-
arly put her arm around me, and tried to |
pull me off TO the most abominable time
| ever heard; but it was no 90. Pres
entlY little counter-hopper came up
and whispered something to her; then |
he threw his arm around her waist, and |
she dropped her head upon his shoulder
and away they went. Pretty soon back
they came, sailing down under full
press of canvas, red in the face, and |
painting for breath. "Get out of the
way, old Uncle Simon" the child gasped,
as they almost knocked me over,
and that little tape seller nearly
crushed my corns with his patent leather
boot Then l got by a window and
looked on for while, and as ten o'clock
came grew sleepy and went to my mis-
srable bachelor lodgings Everything
vas dark and uncomfortable, and most
night | passed / took my
coat and put it away in
obacco this morning, determined never
o put it on again after the sorry figure
,ut last night; butt am more determined
han ever to marry II you could put
ne in communication with some nice
widow with a good house and fixtures, |
hnk / could easily make her see there
vas one thing she yet lacked, and that is
Your humble servant,
5l SIMON SoFT.