Oregon Republican. [volume] (Dallas, Or.) 1870-1872, 1871-01-28
Miscellaneous.
Double you, oh man !! is woman

Il
draws vel, but never gives satisfaction.
Every day is little life, and our
| whole life is but day repeated.
A garment not to be found among
the latest fashions-Mantle of charity.
Outside shows may be purchased,
but real happiness is of home manu-
| tacture-
Men are generally like wagons they
rattle prodigiously when.t there is nothing
/ in them.
! Why does statue diminish in size
! when exposed to shower of rain 1t
| becomes statue wet.
/ A victim of unrequited affections,
concludes as follows:
:" sal me down and thought profound,
This maxim wise [ drew;
/ It's eaiser far to like girl
| Than make a girl like you"
A man with one eye laid wager
with another person that he, (the one>
eyed person), saw more than the other.
The wager was accepted " You have
lost, says the first; II can see two eyes in
your face, and you can only see one in
mine.
A clergyman being much pressed by
a lady of his acquaintance to preach
sermon the first Sunday after her mar
riage, complied, and chose the following
passage in the Psalms as his text:
"And there shall be abundance of
peace-while the moon endureth."
While passing house IN Va. two
drummers observed o very peculiar
chimney, unfinished, and it attracting
their attention, asked faxen~h haired
urchin standing near the house if it
'' drawed well" The aforesaid urchin
replied " Yes it draws the attention
of all the id fools that pass this
road"
A Quaker told young man just
married -" Friend thou art now at
the end of all thy troubles" The
bride turned out vixen, and in a week
the young man came back with the up
braiding remark: 81 thought you
told me | was at the end of my trou-
bles." So | did, friend, but | did
not say which end."
A Chicago paper is responsible for
the story that a few days since some boys
in that city dropped an anvil weighing
200 pounds out of fourth story
window on the head ofan African who was
passing and he had them arrested.
lie said he was willing for the boys to
have fun, but when they jammed a
gemman's" hat down over his eyes
and spoiled it in that way, the law
must take its course.
A Yankee, it is alleged will seek the
almighty dollar even in the jaws of
death but a Frenchman, it seems, will
risk life for the sake of dinner. At
one of the German fortresses in the
Baltic, an inquisitive Frenchman was
seen prowIing about the moat On be-
ing arrested as spy, he established his
innocence by producing his handker-
chief; it contained three dozen frogs.
He was catering for dinner instead of
searching for weak point.
A woman correspondent complains
to Cal. editor that her husband is
cross when she wants him to kiss the
baby, and is offered the followindrecipe
/" Mix arsenic with honey, and spread
the compound thickly on the darling s
lips, and tell him if he will kiss the
little innocent once more you will never
come fooling about him again when he
is tired. He will smack that infant
with cheerful alacrity. lick his lips
with puzzled pleasure, and you will
have no further occasion to worry a
weak minded editor with your private
nonsense"
FuoD OF PLANTs-There is said tc
be carried off from the soil nine pounds
of lime in twenty FIVE bushels of wheat
nine pounds in fifty bushels of oats, and
fifteen pounds in thirty eight bushels
of barley. There are thirty>five pounds
of lime in two tons of rye grass, one
hundred and twenty-six pounds in two
tons of clover, one hundred and forty
pounds in twenty-five tons of turnips
and two hundred and seventy pounds
in nine tons of potatoes. Some soils
contain an abundance Of lime for g
thousand years, while other soils re,
; quire an occasional application of lime
as fertilizer.
J A COMPARISON The farmer wht
| refuses to learn from the better practice
! of his neighbors, and depends solely or
E his own personal knowledge, may b.
q compared to the little spring bubbline
D from the earth-always the same, while
0 the farmer of more enlarged mind, wht
: adopts the better practices of his neigh
f borhood, and profits by all the improve
s ments around him, may be likened to
t noble river, which is fed from man,
t. fountains, and which bears upon it
g bosom the accumulated wealth of expe
a rience. Weigh well the contrast her
Il presented, between the narrow. minded
It farmer, who is exhausting the riches o
the soil which Providence designed 70
his posterity. and the progressive fal
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