The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1871-06-20
A Witness Troubles.

W
ership of a tract of land in Wyoming
territory. knew something in regard
to the sale of these lands, and was fully
prepared to testify to the extent Of my
knowledge in the promises; but judge of
my utter surprise and horror on being
obliged to go through such an ordeal as
the following extracts from my examina-
ton will indicate:
The counsel for the plaintiff commenc-
ed, by asking me if I was married man,
and when had answered that [ was, he
said:
Is your wife believer in the princi-
pies Of the Woman's Rights party?
could not for the life of me, see what
this had to do with the land in Wyoming,
but | answered that was happy to say
that she was not
The examination then proceeds as follows:
Q. You are happy, then, in your mat
rimonial relations A. Yes-(and romem-
bering the oath) reasonably So
Q. Is your wife pretty? A. (Witness
remembering at once his oath, and his
wife's presence in court)-She is pretty.
Q. What are her defects? A. (Witness
remembering only his wife's presence)-
have never been able to discover them.
Q. Have you lightning rod on your
house A. | have.
g. How much did it cost you to have
it put up? A. 1t has not cost me any
thing yeti owe for it.
Q. Is that all you owe for A. No. l
have other debts
Q. Have you any money with you now?
A. have
O. How much A. Counting con-
tents of porte-monnaie). Sixty-two cents.
O. Where did you get that A. with
embarrassment. l borrowed it.
Q. Were you present when defendant
first offered his land for sale to theplaintiff?
A. (Brigthtening up). | was.
O. Hav you ever been vaccinated? A.
| have.
q. On which arm A. The left.
Q. At the time of the first mention of
this land to the plaintiff, who were pres
ent? A. (Witness speaking with hope
full vivacity, as if he hoped they were
coming to the merits of the case). The
plaintiff, defendant and myself
Q. Has your wife any sisters? 4.
She has two Anna and Jane
Q. Are they married ? A. They are.
q. Are either of them as pretty as
your wife? A. Quickly. No, sir.
Q. Have you any children A. Two.
Q. Have they had the measles A.
They have.
Q. Has any other person in your house
had the measles A. have had them,
and my wife has had them
q. How do you know your wife has
had them A. She told me SO.
Q. Then you did not see her have
them A. No, sir
q. We want no hearsay evidence here
how can you swear that she has had
them when you did not see her have
them? A. She told me so, and I believe
her.
Q. Did she take an oath that she had
them A. No, sir.
Q. Then, sir, you are trifing with the
court. Do you understand the obliga-
tions Of an oath A. do.
q. Beware, then, that you are not COM
mitted for perjury. Is your gas-meter
ever frozen A. Yes, sir l....
y. What do you use when the gas will
not burn? A. Candles.
Q. How many to the pound ? A. Nine
Q. How do you know there are nine
to the pound
A. They are sold as mines.
Q. Then you never weighed them your
self? A. No, sir.
Counsel to the court: May it please
your Honor, this is the second time that
this witness has positively testified under
solemn oath, important points to which
he has no certain knowledge. | ask the
court for protection for myself and client.
Here a long discussion took place be-
tween the lawyers and the judge, and at
the end of it the case was postponed for
four months. l suppose it is expected
that | will then re-ascend to the witness
stand but l have determined that when
| enter court room again, | shall appear
as a criminal. These fellows have much
the easiest time, and they run so little
risk, nowadays, that their position is far
preferable to that Of the unfortunate wit
ness.
A Singular Statement.