davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1871-08-26

An old maid, speaking ofmarriage,
says it is like any other disease,
while there's life there is hope.
A sign in Albany reads, " Boots
BACKED inside" Most persons prefer
the old way of backing them on the
outside.
Somebody has written book ell
titled "What shall my son be?"
Upon which some one replies, If
the boy be as bad as the book the
chances are that he will be hanged"
A Young man stepped into a book
shop and said he wanted "A young
mans companion" "Well, sir" said
the book seller, "there's my only
daughter"
"Loss of China packet-shipw
exclaimed liberal-minded old lady
as she laid down a newspaper. IL
should think 50, when not even iron
ones are always safe"
"Why don't you get down and
lead the horse? That is the way to
keep warm" NO." replied the boy,
i" it's a b-b-b-borrowed horse, and
I'll ride him if I freeze"
"Good morning, Mr.. Henpeck,"
said a printer in search OF female
compositors. "Have you any daugh-
ters who would make good type
setters?n "No, but | have q wife
who would make fine devil"
An old lady from rural district
astonished a clerk in one OF the stores
a few days ago by inquirlng II ne
had any "yaIler developments such
as they did up letters in"
"My boy" said clergyman,
" "don't you know that it is wicked to
catch fish on Sunday?" "Guess
hadn't sinned much yet" said the
boy, without taking his eyes Off the
cork, " hain't had bite"
A Massachusetts, paper tells OF a
colored woman who had been lately
converted, but was so unfortunate as
to fly into a passion over the mis-
doing of one of her friends. Her mis-
tress remarked upon the impropriety
of such conduct in the case OF one
about to Join the church, and recelv-
ed this frank response: "l have
'sperienced religion, and rs gW1ne to
Join the church but, Miss B., III
scald dat nigger fust!"
An exchange says: '' In the course
of her travels Mrs. Stanton met an
Irish woman whose back bore the
scars of many a whipping at the
hands of her husband. Mrs. 8.
thought it was splendid chance to
gain an advocate for the woman
cause, and poured out her eloquence
upon the head of Biddy like the
flow of water over a mill tail. Mrs.
S. finally stopped for breath, and her
auditor took occasion to say, Il al
ways feels better after Patrick whips
me- The orator stood not upon the
order Of her going but went at once"
An Irishman, being recently on
trial for some offence, pleaded ''not
guilty." and the jury being in the
box, the State solicitor proceeded to
call Mr.. Furkisson as witness.
With the utmost innocence, Patrick
turned his face to the court, and
said: "Do l understand your honor,
that Nh. Furkisson is to be a witness
fornenst me again 2" the judge said
dryly, I" 1t seems So" "Well, then,
your honor, I plade guilty; sure, an
your honor plaise, not because / an,
guilty, for I'm as innocent as yer
honor's sucking baby, but just on
account of saving Mr.. Furkisso1l's
soacI!0 aH'IaJ = A..
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1871-08-26
BOWie'S Great Duel.

Edwin Forrest has in his posses
sion the first Bowie-knife, and thus
relates to reporter the horrible
story of Bowie's duel:
Close by the plaeard was a huge
knife, looking very much like a cut
ler's sign, or a butchers cleaver for
a pantomine.
"That," said Forrest, "was the
original bowie-knife, and used by
James Bowie. Did you ever hear the
story related of it ~
We signiied our desire to do so.
II tried a long time to get Bowie
to tell me that story" continued
Forrest, "but he always refused, or
turned the conversation upon an
other topic One night in New Or
leans, after the theater dismissed,
we took a long walk and became
quite confidential. "'Now,' said I,
Bowie, give me that story
awe sat down, sir, and James
Bowie, told it. It was a terrible story.
A man had insulted him repeatedly,
at last he gave him so great a pro-
vocation that Bowie accepted the
challenge but upon these terms ::
They were to have their left arms
tied together, and then a bowie knife
was to be placed simultaneously in
the right hand of each. Bowie fixed
his eye upon shat of his antagonist,
sir. Awhile they tiourished their
blades, but just as the challenger
was about to strike, Bowie raised
the left hand and received the blade
in his wrist. Thus transfixed, he
thrust his wrist, with the knife in it,
against his enemy's breast, and held
him powerless. For one instant, ;
said James Bowie, 6 I measured the
mans face-his terror, his despair
and then with a quick, downward
movement, plunged my knife in his
bowels. +" Upoop' fell his bowels at
a single burst upon the ground, COW
ering me with blood.' I can hear
that sound yet, sir; it makes Inc
sick to remember the terrible vivid
ness with which James Bowie imi-
tated it, s-.. ... ..,.,1 :.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24
FROM UTICA.
The T0RnadO-A Church DemOllshed


Tuesday morning the village of Utica was Wis
tied BY terrible tornado which completely de-
molished their new Congregational Church.
This is one OF series Of severe and heavy blowa
A few weeks ago their hotel and depot were
burned to the ground Soon after the carriage
house Of James CLARK, Esq. containing two fine
double carriages and harnesses; and now the
only protestant church in the place is sone-s
total wreck.
1t was BY hard work and persevering efforts
that this church was built-s monument of self.
sacri6ce-the noble gift of people who are
comparatively poor. Neat and commodiou,. and
nearly completed, at cost Of over $1,000, it now
lies heap of rubbish sad and sorrowful
sight; one we'll calculated TO call forth the sym.
pathy Of neishbOring towns and cities.
Long and snxiously had the people Of Utica
hoped aud wished and laborsd for house of
worship; but, weak and divided into different
creeds, they could not be united in such su Gu.
terprise till within comparatively shor. period.
Under the leadership of the Rev. Mr.. Hanning
they undertook about one year age to build, and
had almost completed church, which for beauty
and sttrachveness was honor to them and
credit to the town. They were united in this
work and were blessed with prosperity, unity
and harmony to = marvellous degree.
That beautiful structure, which was the pride
OF the town and the admiration OF the people.
is no more. 1t must be a severe trial-a heavy
blow.
But what are the chances of its being rebuilt?
Knowing their feebleness. fin ancislly, one might
well say they are very doubtful. The truth is,
the people gave 50 literally to build that they
felt it, and they have no. yet had a breathing
SPELL
A good portion Of the money was donated by
James Clark & Son, and they have been having
heavy losses in these fires 1t would not, there.
fore, be unreasonable to suppose that they might
feel like withholding further contributions, and
yet, in the midst OF desolation and disaster
there is but the one feeling. that the church
must be rebuilt. A noble resolve!
We send our money 10 the heather and to the
far west, and we do well; but would it not be
also well to look occasionally nearer home and
when distress and sorrow 30 deep come, a, it has
come to Utica show them that We sympathize
with them and lend them helping hand!
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

of the Democracy of Montgomery county,
Ohio, .(tbe county in which he resided, and
which were unanimously adopted. The reso-
lutions have since become the prominent topic
Of newspaper comment. and have been SUBJ
stAntially incorporatedin the platform of every
Democratic convention that has been held.
They are called departure" from the former
position of the Democratic party, though that
Is hardly the correct name. The resolutions,
while Directing to the manner in which the
18th, 14th and 18th constitutional amend
ments have been foisted into the constitution,
yet, being there, pledge the Democratic party
to abide by them, and to insist ON obedience to
them As fully and unreservedly as the same
party insist on obedience to all the other re-
quirements of the national constitution. To
call this "departure" from ancient democrat.
ic principles, is certainly misnomer The
sagacity of the resolutions as move upon the
political chess.board is conceded as well by
political friends as foes. Chief Justice Chase,
in letter to Mr.. v, written June Goth, SAYS
"You have rendered great service to your
country and party-at least such is my iudg.
ment. May God bless you for it Nothing
Can be truer than your declaration that the
movement contemplated by the resolutions is
the restoration OF the Democratic party to its
ancient platform of progress and reform. |
know you too well to doubt your courage, or
your fidelity to your convictions"
Thus whatever may be said of the deceased,
this cannot be denied: his motives were pure,
his patriotism fervent, his convictions hon
estly made and earnestly pursued, and though
long in public life and with countless oppor-
tunities to obtain wealth, he lived untainted
with proiigacy or corruption, and died an
honest man. In his private and social rela-
lions, his bitterest opponents have always
conceded that his life was pure and his daily
walk and example that Of heightened Chris
tian gentleman.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24
Illinois Legislature.

The extra session of the Illinois Legislature
brought Its labors to close on Thursday.
Most OF the measures named in the Governor
proclamation were disposed of, except it is
understood that no agreement could be ar
rived at on the subject of 'emine nt domain -
and that important subject must lie over.
Half the measures acted upon were of purely
local application to Cook county, and need
no further reference here. The Legislature
meets again in November at Chicago.
The following is complete list of the bills
passed at the extra session:
An act to make further appropriations for
the construction of the new State House.
"a The Chicago South Park bill.
The Chicago North Park bill.
The Chicago West Park bill.
An act to appropriate money to pay def
ciencies OF appropriation for the current ex.
Penses OF the Illinois State hospital for the
insane.
An act 40 make appropriations for and pay.
ment OF deficiencies and indebtedness of the
trustees OF the Illinois Soldiers Orphans
home. .-.
Az act TO provide for the investigation Of
the discipline and management of the fnau-
ciai condition of the State Penitentiary.
Relating te the peNitcntiary at Joliet. to be
entitled IAN Act to Provide for the Manage
Ment of the Illinois State Penitentiary at
Joliet
An act to make appropriation for the pay.
mcnt Of members, officers, and employees of the
General Assembly.
Providing tor the payment of the school
fund orders, and the school fund interest or
ders.
An act provide for the ordinary and con-
tlngent expenses OF the government until the
expiration of the first fiscal quarter after the
adjournment Of the next regular session.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24
Awkward Businoss.
school.

The KuKux investigating committee at
Washington, in their earnest efforts to trump
up accusations against the south, find that in
this whole business the radicals have got the
cart before the horse. They passed strin.
gent bill to punish the south for its KuKlux.
Ism, and then went to hunting up the evidence
to justify such legislation. AS If fate itself
has conspired against them to make them ap.
pear ridiculous, their trump witnesses from
the south fail to furnish any of the desired
facts, while all the witnesses of character that
have been summoned before them persist in
unitcdly and positively swearing that the
south Is fully as peaceable and lawabidng in
all respects as the north. The whole KuKlux
investigation farce is rapidly running into
"emptens" and becoming the butt of riGicue
of all the comic papers.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

The sentence Of the court martial in the
case OF the colored cadet Smith, expelling
hin from West Point, has been committed by
thu President by putting him back one year
in his studies. The President, through the
Secretary Of War, says I'm the opinion of
the President the policy Of the government,
of which the presence Of this cadet in the
military academy is a signal illustration, will
be better subserved by Communication Of his
sentence" So it is the policy Of the govern
mems" to keep niger in the academy any.
how, though he may be guilty of offenses
Tor which white boy would be unceremo-
niously expelled.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

On the subject of the Fox River Valley
Railroad steal. the Ottawa Republican, after
making some high sounding pretensions to
indignation in view Of the manner in which
the towns on the line of the road were eucher-
cd out OF their stock, gives us the following
precious morceau, which, as an illustration of
how to kick dead dog and fondle live one,
is hard to beat
The facts seem to be that the C. B. & O.
Company found the Ottawa, Oswego e. Fox
River Valley railroad in the market for sale.
That company was anxious to dispose of its
franchises and Liabilities together. The Bur
lington Company bought it. 1t is to be pre-.
sumed that it made good bargain. That
was certainly its intention. That sale render
| ed the stock OF the Fox River road worthless.
Who is responsible, the party who sold or
the party who boughtg We are inclined to the
opinion that the seller was the responsible
party, and that ifany blame is to be attached,
there is where it properly belongs.
As Mr.. Blm would say, comment Is un.
necessary"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

a SPEC OF WAn,-Commandcr Rogers, of
the Asiatic Squadron, writes to the navy de-
partment at Washington, that he has been
obliged to give the demi-savage inhabitants
OF Corea, apeninsnla on the eastern coast of
China, bit OF dressing down. Admiral
Rogers, in command of the Monccacy, in CON-
pany with French vessel or two and four
English steam launches, was quietly engaged,
with the permission of the authorities, in sur
veying the river Sable, in that region, when
they were opened upon with masked batteries
from the shore. They returned the compli.
mcnt with interest, smashed the batteries and
killed few dozen yellow bellies. Whereup.
on the Corcans came to their senses and were
willing to negotiate"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

THE BoTTOM OF New JERSEY FALLING
Our Intense excitement prevails in Warren
county, New Jersey, from the fact that within
the past few days a number of immense holes
have been made there by the earth sinking
into fearful unknown subterranean depths.
All the water Of the long level of the Morris
u Essex canal between Broadway and New
Village has disappeared into one of these
m'rthomable depths, and the canal is totally
roiaea. Rambling noises are heard under.
ground, and every morning the excited and
terrified Inhabitants wake up to find new
yawning assures opened to swallow them up
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

New CANCER CURE.-We noticed in our
last the new cancer cure called "Cundurangc,"
in reference to which our minister at Ecuador
had some correspondence with the State de-
partment. Washington correspondents State
that leading physician in that city has en-
ployed the remedy with extraordinary and
unlocked Tor success, in twenty days almost
curing the mother of Vice President Colfax
and other patients afflicted with cancer. A
Boston physician of eminence has sent for the
Quadrangle, and orders from medical men in
New York have been received, but it has been
exhausted except what Is necessary for the
patients now using it. A physician sailed
last week for South America to obtain nm IN
voice Of Cundurango immediately and forward
1t to Washington city, and to make himself
acquainted with the history and peculiaritcs
OF the plant!"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24
FROM M ARSE ILLES.

MARsEILLEs, Ill, June 90.
We had terrific STERN here bet ween four and
Ave o'clock Tuesday morning, blowing off por.
tons Of the roof of Richards Mill and the Cot.
ton Mill. We do not hear Of any other material
damage
Still another railroad accident and miraculous
escape from the jaws of death. A young man
named F-lck, from Baltimore, brakeman on
Freight Train No. 10. while putting on the
brake, fell from the top Of the car across the
track. BY superhuman effort he threw him.
self of the track, his left srm being caught by
wheel, which threw him back again on the
track. Fortunately the train in motion came in
contact with the switched cars. thus saving his
life. The young man is seriously cut and
bruised, b1t no bone. broken. Dr. De Mott was
inme dia,ely called, and rendered all the assist.
ance that was necessary.
The new National Bank, under the auspices
OF Messrs. Dow Il Tillson, 10 progressing favora.
bly, and is expected to b. in operation shortly
after the lst Of July.
\ large delegation from Marseilles, number
ius nearly one hundred people. visited Ottawa
70 attend the circus, and We believe were geuer-
ally well pleased with the performance.
Chr pur
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

EXCURSION TICKETS on the o. q. & F. r.
'. H. H. as well as the Burlington road, from
any station to any other station on the road,
good for the lth of July and to return on the
4th or 9Th, will be sold at all stations at half
the usual fare-that is, one full fare for the
round trip. The ticket must he bought how
ever, before entering the cars, us no excursion
tickets are sold on the trains.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24
necessary

The telegraph announces the death, ut AL
bany, n. u, Of Edwin Croswcll. for SO many
years the able conductor of the Albany Ayyps.
The public press as II proesson,' says II
contemporary most justly, "has developed many
remarkable and great men, both in America
and Europe. Bat rarely, on either hems.
phere has the profession been adorned by
one ADLER or more influential than Edwin
Croswrl'
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

PIums are ripe IN Southern Illinois, and ap-
pear TO be very abundant. In Pulaski county,
IA miles from CARO- says an exchange, two
hundred bushels of plums are falling from the
trees and rotting on the ground, because the
owner of the farm has no time to gather and
market them.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

The Annual Commencement Exercises by the
Young Ladies' of St. Anyelas Academy, Morris,
Ills, will take place on Tuesday evening, June
eth, at 7P.N ..
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-06-24

administering lead through tube" is
what they call it when one person shoots
another.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1871-12-07
TERMS

"Tw0 Dollars for ore rear, iavn-
TiG5ty IN advance; Two Dollars RRd
Fifty Gents If payment be deferred three
months. All papers going out Of the coun-
ty TO be paid for IN advance.
or Single copies. Tea Cents esch
@ Advertisements inserted at One Dollar
per square of Ten Lines or i5es for the 6rst
insertion; Fifty Cents FOR each continuance.
~ Local and Special Notices, Twenty
Gents per line.
TA liberal deduction will be made to
persons advertising for three, six, nine, or
twelve months
or Obituaries and calls on candidates,
Fifty Cents per square.
OF The privilege of yearly advertisers Ia
strictly limited to their own immediate and
regular business; and the business of an ad-
vertising firm is not considered as including
that of its individual m embers. 0TNo de-
Walton from these terms under any ciTcum-
stances.
0- Advertisements not marked with the
number of insertions when handed in, will be
continued until ordered out, and payment
exacted.
OTNo advertisement inserted gratutoIslv
"o Advertisements of an abusive nature
will not be inserted at any price.
BIT Announcing candidates Five Dollars,
TO be paid in advance in every case
or Job Printing of all kinds neatly
done on New Type, aud on as reasonable
terms as any Office in Tennessee.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1871-12-07
A False Wife, and Stern
Unrelenting Husband.

A Birmingham tavern keeper
came to the Mayors office at
Pittsburg, on Monday, and made
an information, charging a board
er with being too intimate with
his wife. Stories had been in cir.
culatien in regard to the wife,
and the husband in order to aScer-
tain the truth or falsity of the
reports, adopted little strategy.
He went away from home on
Saturday, ostensibly to be gone
several days, but secretly returned
IN the evening and watched. A
bout midnight he saw his wife
enter the room of this boarder.
He Immediately entered the room,
revolver in hand, forbade either
of them to stir, and then called
in eleven boarders to witness the
affair. 1t is also stated that he
kept them there until the wife's
father was brought to witness the
c1se. The husband declares his
intention of obtaining q divorce.
1t is stated she pleaded piteousIy
to live with him, but he was in
exorable. -a
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1871-12-07

A late London paper relates
the case of lady, whose hands
were covered with very ir-
ritable blisters. Upon investi-
CATION it transpired that she had
anew pair of silk gloves, and
after wearing them a short-time
these blisters appeared, and had
troubled her ever since. She
wore the left glove more than
the right, and consequently
more affected than the right
The gloves were spun silk, dyed
a light brown color-the dye
apparently being an anniline
dye of .coal-tar origin. The
use of articles SO dyed is dan
gerous. In the Museum of the
College of Surgeons, London,
are preserved some brightly
dyed children's socks, which
gave rise to o similar affection
Oh the feet of a child.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1871-12-07
1enlpJe of 5he muses,
2S2 9Q0
L wonder whyP

wonder why this worlds good things
Should fall in such unequal shares
Why some should taste of all the joys,
And others only feel the cares!
wonder why the sunshine bright
Should fall in paths some people tread
While others shiyer in the shade
OF clouds that gather overhead!
! wonder why the trees that hang
So full of luscious fruit should grow
Only where some may reach and eat.
While others faint and thirsty go!
Why should sweet flowers bloom for some
For others only thorns be found ?
And some grow rich on fruitful earth,
While others till but barren ground?
l wonder why the hearts of some
0'erfow with joy and happiness,
While others go their lonely way
Unblessed with aught of tenderness
L wonder why the eyes Of some,
Should ne'er be moistened with tears,
While others weep from morn till night,
Their heart so crushed with sorrow here
All, we'll! We may not know, indeed,
The why's, the wherefores of each life;
But this we know-there's One who sees
And watches US through Joy or strife.
Each life its mission here fulfills,
And only He may know the end
And loving Him we can be strong,
Though storm or sunshineHe may send.