Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1871-09-14
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

NATURES TA1LoRINa.-A potato patch
Bovine to circumstances, according tc
Punch, is forced politeness.
PROVIDE for your old age with policy
in the Washington Life Insurance Com
! pany, of New York.
! In Germany and German Austria, TWEEN
tyone humorous papers are published
and Ill Of them are we'll supported.
! THE Mutual Life Insurance Company
OF Chicago, is prudently managed, and its
claims are promptly met. Insure there.
A MAN and his wife, who had not met
for eight years, recently found each other
! in a Chicago police court, both charged
with drunkenness.
UNTIL the list of July, seven persons
committed suicide this year at German
sustained at the gaming table.
| The boys are advised to get their
smoked glass ready for the next eclipse.
| 1t will come off in June, 1854, and will be
total through a large part of the United
States.
! A MAN in Galveston, the other day, who
complained of being over heated, affected
permanent cure by drinking six glasses
! of ice water, without the aid of a physi-
clan. lie was cool when the Coroner
| came.
WATERBURY, Conn, has Bachelors
League" whose articles of association
punish, by heavy fine, any member being
seen twi,e consecutivelv in company with
the same woman, and with expulsion from
the order for third offence.
RELATED BY MARRIAGE
As my wife at the window one day,
Stood watching a man with monkey,
A cart came along with broth OF boy,
Who was drivi & u stout little donkey.
TO my VIE then spoke. by way Of joke,
There's q relation OF yours In that carrager
To which she replied, as the donkey she spied,
An. ycs-a relation by marriager"
In driving London underground rail-
road tunnel, we are told that in one part
of the line the cuttings were made through
mass of skulls and bones, sixteen feet in
the ground. In another place forgotten
secret passage, twenty feet wide, was dis
covered, supposing to date from the four
teenth century.
A WOMAN with three lighted candles in
each hand, traverstd the streets Of New
Bedford on her knees the other evening,
not in payment of an election bet, as might
be readily supposed, but as religious
penance in fulfillment of VOW for the
safe return of her husband from sea.
A sCHooLMAsTER in Bridgeport, Conn
who asked small pupil of what the sur.
face Of the earth consists, and was prompt
ly answered, "Land and water" varied
the question slightly, that the fact might
be impressed on the boys mind, and
asked, What, then, do land and water
make ?" to which came the immediate re.
Spouse. Mud"
As specimen Of Berkshire old age, the
Pittsfisld (Mass) Eugk says that one day
recently, MIR. Cecil Spring, of Worthing-
ton, aged ninety six, went into the field of
Horace Spring, in Hinsdale, with his son,
grandson and great grandson, and assisted
in moving a f. Id of grass that yields two
tons to the acre. The old gentleman took
the lead of the four, and the way the grass
went down before these four generations
was caution.
The tomato vine, it is stated by the New
York E0ening Post, is covered with col
orless dust or dye, perfectly undistin.
guishable by the eye, and only to- be
recognized after immersion in water, to
which it communicates dark green color
After picking few tomatoes, the hands,
though in contact with the vines, will ap-
pear perfectly clean. If the hands, how
ever, be washed the water, it is stated,
will exhibit decidedly green shade.
AN aged woman in North Adams,
Mass, relates that many years ago, while
attending a social dance, ayoung mechanic
asked her hand for one OF the dances. She
Indignantly refused, feeling very much
mortified that he should make such an
offer Years have passed, and she has
filled an honorable but humble position in
life, while the young man whom she then
sco1ned has been Governor Of Massachu
sets.
THE ex-Empress Carlotta has recently
in her insanity, caused her guardians anC
relatives a good deal of trouble She in
sists in remaining in the open air all the
time, and any attempt to take her back tt
her az artments brings on frightful parox
ysms Of rage, in which she refuses to tax,
food for several days in succession. TIT
Queen Of Belgium passes every day six o.
seven hours in the company of the unfor
tunate lady. Carlottas favorite Language
is Spanish, and, to crafty her, both tn
king and queen have learned to speak tina
tongue siuce her return from Mexico.
A MAINE paper relates little romance
1t is to the effect that New York mil
lionaire, who was spending the summer will
his wife and daughter at ono of the Dirig'
States most noted watering places, wa
called away on business, and before goin,
gave his daughter some $500 as pin. money
This did the daughter promptly send t
her lover in New York city, with req,les
that he should present himself forthwith
Thus advised, so he acted, and on arrivin
he and his true love hied them away to
clergyman and were made one. And no,
they await the paternal blessing.
A WOMAN living in Portland, Me-, keep
brood of ducks, and of one of them tn
Press tells the following: Lately she nc
ticed that the largest and finest { ne of tn
brood appeared to be ailing. She doctore
it to the best of her knowledge, but j
vain. The duck finally died. The woman
> being anxious to ascertain the cause Of tn
fowls death, cut it open, when singuls
sight presented itself In the crop OF tt
! duck was large frog, like any other (e,
pt that it was covered with a very thi
Skin, through which the blood vesse
= could be- plainly seen), completely film
! the crop, thus causing sutfocation.
l setms tnat when the duck was young
, must have swallowed a little pol)y.WO
= and this polly-wog had grown and thrive
in its singular habitation.
q TIE St. Joseph (Mo.) Gazette says:
t day or two ago, gentleman, who hs
G probably been used to eating genuil
q country cutter, arrived in the city, and p1
q up at one of our hotels. When dinn
J. was announced he took his seat at IL
8 table, and after gazing with evident d
}, light on the lengthy and attractive bill
t fare, made his order 1t was prompt
k filed, and he was indu]ging in the hope
}, luxurious feast, when, helping himse
e to some butter, along with the unctuo1
!. mas, a long hair, evidently from son
e human Uranium, came curling out on
knife. BE held it up, gazed suspicious
at it for a moment, aud then motioncd f
the waiter. The latter individual promI
. ly entered an appearance, when the cues
E holding the knife up before him, 81
G pointing TO the capillary attached to
. exclaimed in voice loud enough to
p heard by the whole table: Look her
: my friend, have you any bald headed bu
p ter ab, ut the house p"
G THE st. Paul Pioneer says: "A stranl
r case of equin, affection and solicitude W
# related to Us yesterday. A teamster ne
e the fair grounds, has for some years driv,
certain span Of horses about the city.
n short time since, he turned them out upf
a the prairie to feed during the night, Al
j. next morning was disappointed at not fin
c ing them, as usual, near his house.
l. searched for them in vain for eleven day
II and had about come to the conclusion tn