Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1871-08-24

ever after, if any one wanted TO pro-
woke him, they had only to ask when
he had last seen Jerry the Fool.
Agriculture a Fraud.
A writer in the Cincinnati Times,
having perused Horace Greely's book a.
bout farming with the Immediate ef-
feet of becoming muddled, indites the
following, which he is careful to ex-
plain is mot by ii. G.. :"
The basest fraud on earth is agricul-
ture. The deadliest igniS .fiauus which
ever glittercd to betray and lazzlcd to
betray. j. agriculture. | speak with
feeling ON this subject. for I've been
glittered and beguiled, and dazhled
and destroyed by this same arch de-
cciycr.
She has male me a thousand promi
Scs, and broken every one or them.
She has promised me early potatoes,
aud the rain drowned them. late po-
tatoes, and the drought hls withcrcd
them.
She has promised me summer squash
J - hh's NAit "Ot 4lN iltNt taLFu ltitii
winter sqpashcs, and the bugs have
dcvOurcd them.
She has promised cherries, and the
turcullo has stung them, and they con-
tain living things, uncomely to tie eye,
aAd unsayory TO tae taste
She has promised strawberries. and
the Young chicken, have cnyclopcd
thrm, aud the eye cannot see them.
>nc Ia, promised tomatoes, and the
I old hens have encompassed them
No wonder Cain killed hi- brother.
I He was tillcr uf the ground rne
wonder i hr didn't Kill hi. father, anA
I Then weep because he hadn't a grand
\ father 10 kill NJ doubt his Early
I Rose potatoes, fpr which he p.I All
I atn seven dollars barred. hai h-,n
I cut down by bugs, from the head Wa
/ tcr7 ot tue Euphratcs. lis Pcunsyi-
vania wheat han been wintcr-k killed.
I ani vast worth cntting. His Nor
/ way oats had gone To straw. aui .uud
I not Weld five pecN- per acre. anI ui~
/ black Spanish waternclou~ Aui been
I stolen hv boys. who hni pulled up tilo
I vines, broken down his patent picket
/ fence. and written -cuui.ou~ do!-erct
all over ms back gate. M wonder hr
felt mad when he saw Abel whl~,lin.
/ along with III, fac I,rnch Mrrju,r>.
\ worth eight ,loliar. /. Atll. au.l wnut
/ going up every day. NJ wouirr he
/ wante,: 10 XIII somebody. amt Thought
4 he'd practice Oh Abel
/ And Noah's gcttln. drunk va, not
Al All surprising. IL nal become a
+ hlsbaninan He had thrown ava,
magnificent opportunities. He might
/ have had 4 monopoly ot any profession
\ Or business. Had he ,tuutel medic ~.
] there would not have been another ,tu,.
\ tor within a thousand miles ID cail h!m
"Quack + ani every family wou,i
/ have bou-ht bottle "t Noah, Com
\ ponnd Extract OF Gopher Wool 4md
/ Antl-Deiu9c syrup. A. politician.
hc might have carried his uNn ward
solid, and controlled two-thrrI- WI tur
. delegates in every convention AS =
lawtcr, b" would nave been retained
I'll every ease triei Ill the Ararat q iar-
( ter Session, or the old ARK High
| Court Of Admiralty. But hc threw a.
way all these advantages. and took Il
agriculture. For 4 long time the
ground was 50 Wet, lie conid raise moth
ing but sweet flags and huIru-he>. AMI
these at last became a drug in tur
market, What wonder that when at
last he did get half Il peck OF grape,
winch were not stun1 l. death ~
Japhet honey bees. he should nave
made wine, and Drowned la, sorrow, IN
''ilowing bowl.
The fact IS, agriculture would Y moe
allze 4 saint. | was almost = saint
when | went into it. I'm demon nov.
I'm at war with everything. | ii ght
myself out of bed nj i o clock, when
all my better nature tell, the u liz
still TIL seven. | fight my self into the
gardeu To work like u brute, when r,..4-
son and instinct tel. me To STAY i'll tAc
hous. and enjoy myself Ike a uaa
fight the pigs, the chickens the n,ic,.
the bugs, the worms everything wnic
| ul, the breath Of life. | fight the
| docks, the burdocks. the nu..rn-. the
thl>ties, the grapes, tine weeds. the
roots-the whole vegetable kingdom.
| | fight the frost, the rain, tile hlil-in
short, fight the universe, adj .cl
wnipped in every battle | have ~
more admiration To waste nn Tie father
Of George Washington for iorgivins
the destruction Of his cherry tree. \
cherry tree is only curcuiio nursery.
| and the grandfather Of his country
kEcw it. | have half dozen cherry
trees, and the day my yonng George
Washington Is SIX Years old. I'll give
nan a hatchet. and tell him to down
WITH every cherry tree on the place