Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1871-05-09
A Boys Advice to Old Men.

L cannot pick up o newspaper
without "Advice to Boys" stares me
in the face. Old men write it
'spose. Nobody else is capable Of
giving advice to boys, of course not
They know all about us, they do
cause they have been there. Ad-
vice is a good thing to have no
doubt, and no family should be with.
out it, but fellow don't want to be
crammed with it all the time to the
exclusion of all other diet.
Now old men need advice oeas-
ionally, but in looking through the
newspapers l don't see that they
get it. So | just thought l would
write little advice to Old Men"
myself, if l am not presuming too
much Gas Aunt Chloe says,) and /
presume | am.
In the first place you old chaps
ought to get over telling how much
smarter boys were when you were
boys than boys are now. You be-
lieve it yourselves of course, cause
you've told it so many times, but we
boys can't see it. We have a notion
that boys are boys, pretty much, (ex-
cept some that are girls the world
over, and one generation of Thorn
don't lay over another generation to
any alarming extent.
Only let you tell it, and you could
out-run, outjump, out-wrestle, and
out-anything else the rising genera
ton Of to-day, when you was boy.
Grandfather, who has got the govt
and half dozen different kinds of
rheumatism, is always saying that
| heard him singing the other day,
81 would | were boy again" l
would he were too. Ii L couldn't
beat him running, and flop him on his
back, side hold, | don't want cent.
l wouldn't go so far as to say
parents obey your children" but l
would suggest to fathers that they
give us a hearing occasionally, on
matters in which we are the most
interested. Don't make US go and
slide down the bill when we want to
skate, and don't try to make preach
ers Of us when we much prefer to
run a saw mill. This is fgurative,
but l guess you know what | mean.
After giving US boys sage advice
about our conduct, and how to be-
have, you old men ought to be care
full how you get TO relating your
al ~ nd
laughing over them before we are
out of earshot. The other day
grandfather read me a long lecture
about the rights OF property, tenn
perance, and Sabbath breaking -
That night an old crony of his n
come to visit him and they had a
glass of punch together. They
though was asleep on the sofa,
and the way they run on about the
fun they had when they were boys
together. They told what the y
knew about robbing Captain Ly-
mans melon patch, and 1t turned
out it was Sunday night, too
When | went to bed they were TAX
ing their third glass of punch, and l
don't know how many they had aft
or that. know grandfather's rheu-
matism was u great deal worse the
next day, and be complained about
his liver. Old men ought TO be care
full about taking too much punch.
l have noticed old men hate to
give up that they can't stand as
much as they used to, or Us young
men can. They get mad if a fellow
like me hints that they can't. But
what's the use Of fooling yourselves ?
We've all got to play out some day,
and when a man feels he is losing
his grip, why not come down and &C
knowledge the corn?
Now, in the above remarks, | don't
mean any disrespect. | like old men
in their place, but don't want much
of their advice. Give the boys a
chance.