Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1871-11-18
Giggling.

voice and BREATH" The baroness of the
definition is only equaled by its unintclli.
gibility. The better plan to understand
the word aud its action is to personally on.
counter gigglcr, and she will clahoratcly
display, iu all its elegance Of outline and
SIMPLIFY Of detail, the beauty aud quality
Of the giggle. The omniprescnce Of the
giggler saves deal Of trouble, so without
delay you plunge IN mclias res You
wish her good day. She smiles. Inquire
after hor health. Another smile. Hope
her parents are we'll. The smile lengthcns.
Emboldened at your favorable reception,
although in doubt as to what has caused
the repeated smiles, you cough little,
and. with an air of tho deepest interest,
ask her opinion of tho latest drama at Wal
lacks. She smirks in reply. Docs she
admire Hamlet!" A faint litter is the
response. Perhaps now you venture the
perfectly truthful remark that it looks like
rain, and that if it rains it will be wet. At
once you have evolved out Of the depths Of
her inner consciousness genuine giggN.
Watch its appearance in its three stages Of
development, Ia Comte, birth, maturity,
decay-and spcctrosoope the result with
your pen for the benefit Of science.
The giggle commences at the mouth,
with certain witches in the ncighborhood
Of that organ. The lips part, the teeth
mute whitenesses of the dentists skill-are
exposed to view. The teeth unclasp, aud,
snake-like, the tongue appears coiled up
in the back. ground. Next, the head is
slightly arched. and the eyes slowly close.
At the eye then the giggle natures. The
eyes close in earnest, the nostrils dilate,
and for time giggIes play about the raw
ishing nose, like lightning about noun.
tain peak. The fascinating face becomes
corrugated wrinkles, and shows as many
lines of bcauty-in the Hogarthian vein
as an iudia.rubber head stretched to an
angle of As degrees. At this stage, the
giggler is supposed, by herself, to be be-
witching; and so, to hcightcn the effect
and the general enchantlnent, there then
is a rsduplicated auttcring of the wand like
fan, depression Of the head. aud an incli-
nation Of the form. The third period of
development is now ushcred in. The
gigglcs begin to grow beautifully less,
| fierce conflict arises between the centrifu.
gal aud the centripetal forces, the couvo-
lutions become more and more refined, the
giggles shorten, eyes open, teeth shut,
mouth closes-and the giggle is over.
You breath more freely now, and if q
man Of spirit, alarmed at the frightfal con.
vulsions which invest the giggler with the
air of martyrdom, run hastily for restora.
tives, rouse the house, summon the doctor. |
Rcassured by her composure, you will 70.
woke all your previous orders, and tenderly
inquire as to the frequency Of the attacks,
their duration aud possibility of cure |
These graceful attentions on your part will |
speedily bring on a relapse; the perform
ance rccommences, and the giggle goes
through the same stages of development as
before, only with greater vehemence and
freedom of action, for practice makes per-
feet You become seriously alarmed, your
teeth chatter, your whole nervous system |
is unstrung, you beg pardon and graciously |
attempt to depart. Again the giggle rises,
aud ends, finally, in hystericaI sobbing, in
which you can distinguish such despairing |
assertions as GO I'll die I'll die! I'll die Z |
laughing if you don't STOP" You really |
have said nothing more than few COM
monplace remarks, and that these should |
have produced such cachinuatory effect |
is altogether mystery. So you humbly
take your leave, sorely psrplexed at the |
euigmatical character of women in general |
and gigglers in particular. 81. .., .....,
The details Of the giggle can be ampli-
fed at pleasure. Indeed, the performance
itself varies with certain conditions, notably |
the Stiffness Of the giggler and tho value
of your own time. The timid gigglcr will
giggle perhaps for five minutes every hour; |
the professional one will giggle certainly
six hours day. Such details, however,
are Of nature over which you realistic |
writer might pardouably gloat, but are too
narrowing to be here depicted. Other |
wise the effect might be - serious - Pope
describes in his Rape Of the Lock"
{" Then flashed the living lightning from her
And scream. ofhorror r.nd til .stigh.sd & skies, |
Not louder shouts to pitying Heaven are cast,
When husbands or when lap-dogs breath |
Their last"
Still there are certain accessories to the !!
giggle which are pertinent to the subject, |
aud harmless to delicate nerves. The |
handkerchief is generally found useful, !
and when spread over the face gives cap. |
tivating expression thereto, since it - per- |
fectly invisible. The hands are perfectly
relaxed, to denote womanly impotence.
The arms are wildly tossed about, to ex-
press feminine reserve. The eyes roll |
iearfully in their sockets, to show maidenly
coyuess. The hair is dishevelled, to ex- |
press extreme delicacy. The talk il in.
coherent, to signify logical force. And,
as last resort, your professional giggler. |
the radical, the adept 10 her art, will throw
herself, with the widest abandon, ip chair |
or bury her face 10 the luxurious depths
Of a sofa.