The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1871-11-11
How to Get a Berth In a Sleep
Ing Car.

was not put in my care don't knott
how this is; | suppose it is something in
my countenance; if / knew what, | would
have it extracted. | don't like having
unprotected females and school boys and
girls 10 ned over to me. 1t is little hard
on man. And what is the good of it /?
Nobody needs protection; if any one does,
1t is benevolent, good-looking, innoceni
sort of a man-such as the writer of this
l was reminded Of this by an adyen>
ture that happened to me the other night
In New York. | was about leaving on
the nine O'Clock train for Washington,
when man who was in search Of me ap-
preached. knew he was in search of
me. was in search Of some respects
able, benevolent individual to put wo>
man under his care. And he did She
happened to be rather good looking, and
L didn't object in violent way. but was
neither very ,.ceful nor acious over
the compliment. When / came TO secure
section in the sleeping car, l found that
delegation of pious people was going to
Washington on some charitable business
AID had taken nearly all the berths. |
secured two-2t least thought | bad
and marched my female with her two
carpet sacks, strap satcheI, a mocking
bird, and silk umbrell, with a waters
proof and two shawls done up in straps.
into 16l. When we arrived inside, |
learned for the first lime that my unpro-
tected female could not abide the sleeping
cars. She said she felt lie suffoca ting,
and | wished secretly that she would suf-
focate; but when we came to occupy our
berths made two disagreeable discover
les. The first, that the tickets called for
the same berth; the other, that this blrih
was the upper one. My female friend
said positively that she could not get into
that berth informed her that it was
her only chance to sleep, ard she told me
that she would rather sit up. l then gave
her the further Information that that was
all very well, but in a 81 eping car there
was no place to sit except on wash basin,
and that | thought would be rather incon-
venient. AT last, with the aid of step
ladder, the steward and two pious old
pumps, my unprotected female was boost
ed into her roost and the curtains closed
over her for the night.
Then came the question as to what was
TO become of the undersigned. | consult
ed the conductor and the steward, and had
the satisfaction of hearing the fact stated
that if l had told them earlier the blunder
might have been remedied. But as it
was the pious delegation had retired for
the night and all the berths were occu-
pied. The conductor, however, told me
he would try and make some arrange
ment, and then went off about his busi-
ness.
A drunken man had been captured On
the platform as we started, whe e be was
found addressing the stars in vociferous
way, the sleeping car ticket fished out of
his pocket, and the inebria ed fellow
chucked into an upper berth. was lean
ing against the washstand of the car in a
very melancholy way some time after,
when this intoxicated fellow stuck his
head out and addressing me, said:
81 would like to have a drink"
''Water p said l.
''No, darn water; l want some whis-
ky / am as dry as a chip"
"Well," / responded. II am sorry to
say that l have none about me-
"Ain't you the conductor ?"
"No," l responded, 81 don't believe
am
''Nor do I. If you were the conductor
you would have something to drink -
Where is the conductor a.
/ told hi!:l he was in the next car.
"Well,' said he. 81 have a great mind
to get up and hustle round till get a
drink"
'sMy christian friend," said, s'there is
nothing in the constitution nor in the six
teenth amendment that prohibits you from
getting up and hunting drink if you
want it
Whereupon the inebriated Individual
rolled out of the berth. lie rolled into
several others and was promptly elected
and at last, getting his legs, disappeared
at the further end of the car.
took the situation at a giance. Here
was berth vacated. Above it was a
white hat. Immediately removed that
white hat. / carried it further along and
put it over a christian association who
was lost in the sleep of innocence and
peace, and then, returning, | enseOnsed
myself in berth vacated by man who
had constitutional right TO a drink.
was dropping into slumber, for l
always sleep on car devoted TO thai bus
mess and invented by Mr.. Pullman the
motion has the same effect upon my brair
that rocking has upon child, and moi
only sleep easily, but profoundly. In a
few seconds l should have been beyond
all disturbances, but it happened / wa;
awakened out of my first wink by a row
in an adjoining section. There seemed tc
he pitched battle going on between ono
of the delegates and gentleman whC
claimed the berth to be the one he haC
just vacated. | heard him say ''Now ge
out of that - and he called the good mar
the offspring of female dog, adding there
to some very profound language. Th'