The Hillsborough recorder. [volume] (Hillsborough, N.C.) 1820-1879, 1871-05-17

y A TEACHER of vocal music asked an old
lady if her grandson had any ear for mussc?
''Ma'al now (raking off her spccs) /
ra'aly can't see up it. Won't you take
the candle and look.
Pomp. what am de jury Of inkest?"
Wal, de fac is, nigga, u jury of inkest am
d lot OBJ fellers wat sets down on dead
man to fluid out whedder he am dead for
.sartin or only playin' possum."
sThis-;s-a-reporter.
Sce-how-jolly -he-l looks.
A-nan -has-cut- his-throat,
And-he-is-going- up-four-p airs-oi-stair
To-gct-the-item."
In pool, across the road, in the county
Of Tippeiary. ireland. is stuck up pole.
having affixed to it board, with this in
scription: Take notice. that when the wa
ter il over tlis board, the road is inpassa-
be-
A Mississippi papershows the advanta-
ges of advertising by telling Of man who
advertised in its columns for lost COW,
and had it restored to him before the pa
per was distributed, "with copy Of the
Iadee stuck on its horns.
That man, said wag. came to Mas
hua forty years ago. purchased basket.
and commenced gathering rags. How
much do you suppose he is worth now z
Nothing he continued, after pause,
.aud he owes for the basket
LIeHT MoUsTAcHE. "A gentleman
who entered BARRIERS shop to get shaved
was Recommended by the barber TO raise i
monstache. -
81 can't do it. ."
Oh, yes, you CAP. sir, if you'll try. A
light summer one, anyhow.
A BLESSING. We had related to Us
the other day an anecdote Of an old lady
who formerly entertained travellers in a
neighboring county. Before the guests
commenced meal it was her custom to
ask blessing.
20 lord make us truly thankful for
the food that is now before US. Nancy,
hand around the corn bread first. and ther
the biscuit afterward. Amenl'
A youth was leaving ] bis aunt's house
house after visit, when. finding il was be-
ginning to rain, be caught up an umbrella
that was snugly placed in corner. and
was proceeding 70 open il, when the old
lady. who for the first time observed his
movements. sprung towards him, cxclaiul-
ing. No, no, that you never shall. I've
had that umbrella twenty three years. and
il has never been wet yet; and I'm sure il
shan't be wetted nowr iil
Dor. ATKINSON, Of Milton, is wag !;
when the smallpox was thore Dol went
out TO visit some old maiden women named
the Taylors. They were afraid Of ''ketch-
IN il " and locked the door to keep him
out. Dol threatened TO pitch some in
through the key-hole" IL they didn't open
tile door. One Of the old women sung
out: Let him in, sister fur that Is the
mo is ketchines way, room, il ever was
took. !" Adolphus cntered.-[Cor. u
IIillsLOrO Recorder.
A CERTAIN negro was 80 convinced Of
the lowness Of bis race that be was indiifcr-
eut as to bis future state, believing that
.dey'll make him work ebcn in heaven. +
II Is to stub de clouds along ~
A Mobile negro who had twenty cents
worth Of powder IN his pocket, put red
hot yipe in there with e. How Is that
for 6ighY' was the remark Of an old seven
up player. as the form Of the colored man
became like speck In the sky. There Is
one vacant chair and vacant hat at his
late residence.
A CnARMINe CUsToA. Somebody,
evidently an old bachelor used 10 such
things, thus describes how they do in Maine !:
Quaker young ladies in the Maine Law
State. Il Is suid, still continue TO kiss the
lips Of the young temperance mon TO see IL
they have been tampering with liquor.
just imagine beautiful young temperance
woman, With al the dignity Of an cxecu-
tive officer, and the innocence Of a dove,
with the charge, Nj. THE ladies be-
lieye you are in the habit Of tampcring
with liquor. and they have appointed me
10 examine you according 10 our established
rules; are you willing? You nod no.
quicsccncc. Sho getty stepsclo or 70 you
lays her white arm around your neck. dash
e. back her raven curls, raises her syIph-
like form upon tip-toe. her snowy. heaying
bosom against your own. and with her an.
gelie features III up with smile as sweet
as heaven places her rich, rosy. pouty, SUI
gar, mclasses. lily, rosebud, cream tart.
apple pie. peach pudding. apple dumping.
gingerbread, nectar lips against yours, on
10 Jerusalem. hold me y kisses you. flur.
rah for The girls aud Maine Law, and death
10 all opposition