Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1871-04-14
BEEFSTEAK FOR MINISTERS.
BY T. DE WITT TALMAGR.

There have been lately several elaborate
articles remarking upon what they call the
lack of force and fire in the clergy. The
world wonders that, with rousing theme
as the Gospel, and with such a grand
work as saving souls, the ministry should
ever be nerveless. Some ascribe it to lack
of piety, and some to timidity Of tempera-
ment. We believe that in great num-
Der of cases it is from the lack of nourish-
ing food. Many Of the clerical brother
hood are on low diet. After jackets and
sacks have been provided for the eight or
ten children of the parsonage, the father
and mother must watch the table with
severest economy. Coming in suddenly
upon the dinner-hour of the country cler-
gyman. the housewife apologies for what
she calls "a picked-up' dinner, when.
alas !! it is nearly always picked-up.
Eight hundred or thousand dollars
for minister is only slow way of kill
ing him, and is the worst style Of homi-
eide. Why do not the trustees and eld-
ers take mallet or an ak. and with one
Congregations sometimes mourn over
dull preaching when themselves are to
blame. Give your minister more beef
steak. and be will have more fire. Next
to the divine JUNCTION, the minister needs
blood and he cannot make that out of
tough leather One reason why the apos
ties preached so powerfully was that they
had healthy food. Fish was cheap along
Galilee, and this, with unbolted bread.
gave them plenty of phosphorus for brain
food. These early ministers were never
invited out to late suppers. with chicken
salad and doughnuts Tea parties, with
hot waff1es, at ten o'clock at night. make
namby- -pamby ministers; but good hours
and substantial dict, that furnish nitrates
for the muscle, and phosphates for the
brain and carbonates for the whole frame,
prepare a man for effective work. When
the water is low the mill-wheel goes slow;
but full race. and bow fast the grists are
ground In man the arteries are the
mill-race. and the brain the wheel; and
the practical work of life is the grist
ground. The reason our soldiers failed
in some of the battles was because their
stomachs had for several days been inno-
cent of everything but "hard-tack. -
See that your minister has full haver-
sack. Feed him on cruel during the
week, and on Sunday he will give you
Cruel. What is called the "parson' s
nose" in turkey or fowl is an allegory
setting forth that in many communities
the minister comes out behind.
The damage begins in the college board
ing house. The theological student has
generally small means, and he must 60 to
cheap boarding house. A frail piece Of
sausage trying to swim across river of
gravy on the breakfast plate, but droWn.
ed at last; ''the linked sweetness long
drawn out" of flies in the molasses cup !;
the gristle of tough OK. and measly bis
cult, and buckwheat cakes tough as the
cooks apron. and old peas in which the
bugs lost their life before they had time
to escape from the saucepan. and stale Gu
cumbers cut up into small slices of cholera
morbus. are the provender out Of which
we are trying at Princeton and Yale and
New Brunswick to make Sons of Thunder.
Sons Of mush! From such depletion we
step gasping into the pulpit. and look so
heavenly pale that the mothers in Israel