Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes Co., O. [Ohio]) 1870-1895, 1871-09-28

Newspaper writers Will tnorouSn
ly appreciate the following O'er true
tale, which we take from the Phila-
delphia Dispatch:
A week or two ago one of our re-
porters had occasion to refer to a
certain woman, whom we will call
Hannah Smith, as a denizen of the
Eleventh Ward. A day or two af-
terward a huge man entered the of
fee with his brow clothed with
thunder. In his hand he carried a
fearful club, and at his side trotted
a bulldog whom hunger evidently
had made desperate. With that
quick appreciation Of the situation
which is creditable to the superior
intelligence of educated men, the
editor of this paper and the pro-
prietors darted to the window,
climed outside, slid down the light
ming rod, and went across the street
to watch the bloody fray through a
spy glass. With the fearlessness or
conscious innocence we sat still,
merely inserting our legs in two sec
tions of stove-pipe, to guard against
any misapprehension of facts on the
part of the bulldog. The man with
the club approached. fs.
care you the editorp" he asked,
splitting on his hand and grasping
his club.
We told him that the editor was
out; that he had gone to the north
pole with Captain Hall, and that he
would not return before 1876, in
time for the centennial celebration.
care you proprietor" asked the
man. T
We explained to him that we were
not, that the proprietors were also
out: that they had gone to South
America for the purpose Of investi-
eating the curative properties OF
cundurango, and they expected to
remain there for several years.
swell, whoever you are" ex-
claimed the warrior, my name is
Smith,"
We told him we were glad; be-
cause, if there was one thing better
than the possession Of the name OF
Smith, it was the privilege of know
ing man of that name. "But,
Smith," we said, "why this battle
array? 1t is absurd for a man to
put on the pa1aply of war, and frisk
into editors sanetums fnmbling
club and accompanied by dis
heartening bulldog, simply because
his name happens to be Smith,"
He said he called in to burst the
head of the man who had insulted
his sister. ..
"It is impossible, Smith, that such
a thing could have been done by any
one in this Office" F
ais, but it was, though; and hel
name was published, too. Miss
Smith-Miss Hammer Smith"
"May we be permitted to inquire
Mr.. Smith, what was the precise
character of the affront offered to
Hannah%
"Well, you see," said Mr.. Smith
"the blackguard said she was a den
izen. And 1 want you to under
stand," exclaimed Smith, becoming
excited, and brandishing his club il
wild manner over our head, whil'
the bulldog advanced and com
menced to sniff up and down ou
stove e-pipe-"I want you to under
stand she is decent young woman
with good character, and none o
your denizens and such truck. Th'
man who says she is denizen is
blackguard and thief, and I'll smasl
him over the nose if I get chance
They may say what they pleas
about me, but the man who abuse
my sister has got to suffer-" AM
Smith struck the table in a violen
) manner with his club, while the bull
E dog put his forelegs on the back @
E our chair.
, We pacified Smith with diction
Y ary. We pointed out to that ragin
e warrior that the Websterian defini
r ton of the word "denizen" give
D such person an unoffending chal
: acter, and deprives the term of e,
lerything like reproach. Smith sal