Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1871-07-13
MISCELLANEOUS ITENs

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS
A PITCHED BATTLE-A fight yr
two tars.
Docs beat dentists. They insert !,
teeth.
WHEN does a man feel girlish.
he makes his maiden speech.
A MULATTo woman called Mads.
gelo has just walked 1000 miles il
land, in as many consecutive hours
the third person known who has q,
this feat.
THE Salt Lake City Neaos SAYS,
short time since, while some mel
engaged in clearing out spring
region from which the people
water for irrigation, they found, stu
erect, in the spring, what had been.
year.old heifer, in an advanced ID
petrifaction.
An ingenious youth in the oils
lately hire hands to commence
The foreman asked "what kind Of
he wanted to put down." meaning
large easing or small. Well" v,
reply, 81 guess you'd better sock
hundred barrel well that's as high
run now, amt it?"
THREE young men, not long agt
at a beer-saloon in New Albany, Il
a drink. The keeper of the establl
told them to drink quick, as his da
up stairs, was dying. He added
will soon be dead, and you can cal
in short time" While the part
drinking the girl died.
"CUFFEE, what do you tink de
useful oh de PLANETS, de sun orde m0
"Well, Sambo, l tink de moon ortel
de first rank in dat ar ticker" "W
you tink 50, Cuffee?" "Well, l tell
kase she shines by night, when we
light, and the sun shines by day, wha
DON'T"
A MAN painting the cornice Of
in Hartford, fell from a ladder, and
supposed that he was badly hurt.
diately after the fall, a young man
to the store to inform the painter l
misfortune that had overtaken his |
man. The "boss" listened to a thil
description of the fall, and, with tht
ing passion still strong within him 4
anxiously, odd he spill his paint?
THE punishment for drunkenness d
the Passamaquoddy Indians in the
mer is to strip the victim, bind him
and foot, and place him on the gr|
where he is exposed to the bite Of i
flies and mosquitoes, in which postaz|
is kept until he repents. Some of Id
Tenders have been known to endun|
punishment for twenty four hours.
ONCE when Marshal Mcmahon va
onel Of regiment, he had an alter
with a subaltern and threatened bin
disobedience Of orders. The officer
pistol, but fortunately the cap sns :
Mcmahon simultaneously ordered b
be confined in the guard-room for
days-for having his arms out Of ord
THE following inscription can b
on white gravestone in an old cen
at Newmarket, New Hampshire:
HRARE
Body OILS
|. SIAH HvnT
on dyd IVnE
we %: 80 A
GE Is.
A NOVELTY in domestic arts
introduction of starch colored to sI
sired tint. By its use dress may Be
up in different colors, as the swnel
wish, thus obviating, at times, the
sity for new articles of clothing. On
is made by rubbing three parts fucaI
dissolved in water, into twenty pal
glycerine, and then adding one hun
and fifty parts of finely pulverized u
A COUNTRY merchant who wante.
tailor's irons, several years ago, on
them of firm of hardware merchsi
the city. He first wrote this o.
"Please send me two tailor's goo
Thinking this was not grammar, he
troyed it and wrote this one: Please
me two tailor's geese" Upon retaI
he destroyed this one also, for lea
should receive live geese. he tho
over the matter till he was very .
worried, and at last, in a moment o. /
peration, he seized his pen and wro's
following, which was duly POI
"Messrs. So-and-so: Please send me
tailor's goose, and, hang it, send n'
other"
A PLEASANT instance of poetic
is reported from a town in Oregon.
morning young man called upon
editor of the only paper in the count.
asked permission to look at the bounu
Of that paper for 1869. 1t was gh'
While the editor was in bed WailiDs
his wife could wash his shirt, that
man carried away the file, nor was
seen again, until his lawyer Offered
evidence during the trial of an actor
$4,000 damages, for an alleged llbel,
that young man brought agaiha
editor. 1t is gratifying to learn lna
plaintiff recovered Ga cents damage
was arrested by the editor on chas
stealing books, convicted, and seni'
to the penetentiary for seven yeas,
now masticates mush and m0lasses
penal institution aforesaid. Let tnVs
would not share his fate, profit by ~
ample.
RATHER a remarkable case Of u
affection has occurred at SomerVlhT
A lad named Dickinson suddeny
peared from his home. Two days.
returned in an exhausted condluon
stated that after indulging IN w
play with other boys, and with d.
heated, he went into the water
The next day he went to school,
ill, and studied hard. In the afIer.
went for walk, and remembers ~
more until he found himself IN M is1
ter, N. HI. When his senses had ~
he started homeward, and walkea
way. His shoes and stockings wen