Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1871-05-25
Hunl0r0ua.

(
SoSe Of the billiard ball sDh, carom
me backr'
MAN whom we can put up with-a
good hotel keeper. ia EfEfft
A "FREE AGESr"-orio who goes off
with his employers money. 3sI#
+ WHY is the sun like good loaf I
Because it's light when il rises ,..
I NEVER have a wooden leg made of
oak, because the oak is apt to produce
acorn.
Ir is hard to respect old age whe n
one gets sold on a venerable pair Of
chickens.
DoN's be too sure of your horse hut
You may have II horse-shoer for con-
sideration. sF..8a .H
A GOOD yoke--The matrimonial. z.
S.-Some perons regard it rs good
joke.
WHAT is that which, when brought to
the table, is cut but never eaten "A
pack Of cards, ,.e
Wny is grain of sand III the eye
like a schoolmaster's caneg Because
it hurts the pupil
"YoU look ms though you were be-
side Yourself, as wag said to fell
low who stood beside donkey.
q COULD tail unfold" Could yous
4 Then lose not moment, but go in
stantly to Mr.. Darwin. He will be de-
lighted to see you.
"OH mother" said a little boy, MS he
stood looking at the lake by moonlight,
'see how the moon sprinkles down on
the water! s.-...
A NEGRO, after gazing at some Chi
nese, shook his head and solemnly
said, "If lie white folks be so dark as
dat out dar,, / wonder what's de coler
of de black folks !" ... ...a "a
A SNOWMAN advertises that among
his other curiosities is the celebrated
difference which has been so often
split by bargin makers. He says heF
has both halves of it, "a. .s seo
"FoR whom are you concerned ~
asked Judge of witty lawyer. ~
am concerned for the defendant may
it please your honor, but am retained 4
by the plaintiff, y was the reply. a
boy, said an ill tempered old fell
low to noisy lad, what are you hol-
lerin' for when | am going by2"
" Humph," returned the boy, "what
are You going by for when l am hol-
lerin'Y" aa us v0 H. st 8saaG
SOME one wishing to be witty on
gentleman with large mouth, asked
him elf he had long lease of that
mouth of his, when he was good-hu-
moredly answered, "No, have it only b
from gear to year. sse.f.,a. se sI
IT'S n solace for the man who is never
happy unless he is winning or losing,
or makinga wager, to recall the With
eism, "a man who don't bet is as bad /.
as the man that does, or, at least, he is
no better - .+,,
EVE was the only woman who never /.
threatened to go and live with mamma,
ard Adam was the only man who never
tantnlized his wife about ''the way
mother cooked" essF .a Il
A CELEBRATED authoress once remark
ed that the only thing which reconciled
her TO being n woman was the reflec
ton that she would never have to mar
ry one. ga# a
Ir is mentioned as possible explana-
ton of the eccentricities Of Mrs. Fair,
the California murderess, that she was
once member Of McKenn Buchanan's
tragedy company Such an experience
us that, il is thought would qualify
anybody for a lunatic asylum, or the
galows in month.
"ToM, word with YOU" Be
quick, then; Tn in hurry" "What
did you give your sick horse tother
day ga pint of turpentine. y John
hurries home and administers the same
dose to favorite charger, which,
strange to say, dies in half an hour.
His opinion of Toms veterinary ability
is somewhat staggered He meets him
the next day. "Well, Tom, 1 give my
horse pint Of .turpentiine, and it kill
ed him I" $50 it did mine"
EXCUSE my left hand" said Wig
gins, az he shook hands with a friend,
" Certainly; Ineyer take umbrage at
nature" was the reply, referring to
Ecclesiastics x, 2. The text is. "a
wise mans heart is at his right side,
but FOOLS heart ut his left, and the
consequence is they have not spoken
since. ~ sofia ua
A LITTLE boy and girl had been eau !
toned never to take the nest egg when
eggs; but one evening the
girl reached the nest first seized an
egg, and started for the house. Her
disappointed brother followed, crying
/" Mother Mother! Susy, she's been
and got the egg the old hen measures
by
"SUsIE," said an ancient advocate of
the "good old ways" in Lansingburg
the other day. ''where is this tower