Weekly Trinity journal., 1871-01-14

| SPN4' WV NOMlhS spring IL III uOeS not rain soon
but here goes for small solution by the way of
| trial
On SEEING PossUM UP GUM TREE
How the duece you climbed that tree,
own the corn-it bothers me
| A slip and down you'd come ker-slam
And dlsarrange, perhaps, your diaphragm
Then you'd "play possum," en- forsooth
d poke my finger in your mouth
Yes, in horn--dont like your looks
Play that On pard, but not on Crooks.
Guess as how I'd leave you lay
And call again some other day
Burnt children dread the scorching fire
And that's what ails your Aunt Marier.
All l need is just little cuture-anybody
can see that. But poetry is not my forte. Most
any branch of science, from bugology up, l am
an adept in. For convincing proof, reader, |
propose short dissertation on Astronomy
Commencing with the Planetary system, first
in order is Jew Peter and Vesuvus, the evening
the morning star to everybody in this county ex-
cept my partaer and certain old friend in
Weaver Basin to them it is the evening star.
1t is astonishing why some people should prefer
regulating their tme-pieces by sunset but
am digrcssing. Next comes Zip-kune, the larg-
| est of the planets, which is inhabited by China
men and is called the Celestial Flowery Kingdom
Large cargos of its inhabitants are shipped yearly
| to California some to work in the mines, some
to cook and the remainder for Democratic polit-
ical bait. Next in size is Saten, which being
girdled by huge belt, is the God of the pugil-
lists and 49-ers. Mas, small but beautiful is
the Goddess of the " Babes in the Woods" The
theory that the moon is green cheese made from
the whey of the milky-way, is exploded, She is
burnt out or dead world all her combustible
matter being consumed and her atmosphere gone
she went up the fnme for (vulgary speakng)
want of breath Next comes the Earth the planet
on which we live and which should interest us
most. The earth was at one time more beauti-
full than Mas even; her inhabitants were in
high state of culture and refinement everything
lovely to behold but by some hook or crook
she went Democratic--then and there things
busted. The mud avalanche sweeping down
from the North buried everything in its ruins !;
large quantities of whisky, yet remaining, were
buried also and the gases escaping are the sole
cause of earthquakes at the present day-the
stuff soured.
shall omit the remaining Planets and pass on
to the Asteroids. Bet your ribs know all about
them fellows had 'em once. In running bed
rock tunnel, three on us was down at time with
them. Oh, my dearest Elizabeth, Jr., but don It
they twist fellow though
The stars which have heretofore puzzled as
tronomers to know their component parts, have
been discovered to be nothing more or less than
mushrooms. The or Dog-Star to us is the
most brilliant and lies away South in the Bull
Pup Constellation. She is now leaving this
neck of the woods at the rate of forty million
miles per minute, and If she fails to catch the
rabbit her speed will be increased.
Dismissing the subject of Astronomy for the
present, will inform the reader that | am posted
on Farmacy. Put it into practical effect once !;
raised seventy tons of Hbernisn peanuts sold
them to an extension branch of the Democratic
family, whose surnames preface with knot-hoe
for instance the OFlynns and the O'Jones-
and done well.
And furthermore I understand Materia- Medca
Chemistry and am professional druggist. Was
in the drug business once sold vaccine virus at
two-bts drink, but as it was warranted,
burst up. 1t didn't take on Republicans, so
lost what had made on the peanuts
The weather is delightful. wonder II there
are figures enough to numerate the times that
has been said and written. ! interviewed buck
Indian on the weather question to-day but failed
to elicit much
Questi0n.-How's the state of your stomach
Ans~er.-Much hungry heap.
Q.-Where is your Mohaleh2
A.-Molem die Molem cry heap; pappoose
sick, too.
Q.-How do you stand on the question of Rev
enue Reform?
A.-Heap like EN- beef
Q.-Where does " Injn " go when he dies
A.-Down in the ground
Odd you ever help eat pack-train
A.-Like-em beef; like-em bread heap like
EN- salt.
| supposed when he said his Mohaeh was dead
and his pappoose sick, that he was playing con-
fdence man on me, but as had not seen one for
long time, stood it and gave him some grub.
Reader, if you are in want of little informa-
ton on any subject and cannot procure it else
where, come down to Dog-Fennel the denzens
of the place are all smart and, by the way, hos
pitable. Come. GRIMES, JR.