Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1871-05-04
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

CuoOSS w SusltCt.-CLeraGHQ Herald
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
A COOP BIRTHDAY PREsENr-A polc,
in the Mutual Life, of Chicago.
A DRUNKEN man can rarely walk in
straight line. He's more used to a IVA
tangle. 'e
THOSE who most frequently visit tho
watering places in the summer are miIk
men.
POLICIES become self-sustaininp in -.
WASHINGTON Life Insurance Company, Of
New York. "
Two brothers named Smalltubs, recen.
ly married In Maine, took the names ~
their wives.
AN apothecary sent in a bill to widow
lady, which ran thus: ITO curing ymr
husband till he died!'
THE cigar bill Of the young Wall s,,se.
millionaire, Dimock, is $1,000 year.
A LADY in Terre Haute, aged twenty.
nine, has recently married her fourth has.
band.
The cost of boarding prisoners in the
Ohio Penitentiary last year was $3.50 Der
head.
THEY have just got through suryeyin,
Arizona, and it is found to contain seyeuT
million acres
THE young lady who is unable to sun
port riding habit should get into a walk
ing habit.
A LADY calls the little memorandum he,
butcher sends with the meat, "pencilines
by the weigh"
A SERVANT in family at Bangor. Me-
has saved, since September, 1S43, at sal.
airy of 81 per week, 81 $780,
A WRITER in the Boston Herald SUP.
gests the taxing of cats as a means of q.
cilitating the payment Of the public debt.
A FEMALE lecturer says the only decor.
thing about Adam was a rib, and chat
went to make something better.
THE difference between the school.m
and the clerk-boy is, that one stores the
mind and the other minds the store.
A COUPLE Of Belgian giants" says the
Cincinnati Globe, are now in the city for
the purpose Of exhibition. They are SO long
that it takes two days to exhibit them"
THERE are nine persons living within
three miles of the Hudson, N. Y, Post.
Office whose united age is S19 years, oran
average of 81 years.
CLERICAL ERROR
High" Parsons would have couples tarry
When they propose to wed in Lent;
But why? The sooner people marry,
The sooner mostly, they repent.
THERE is clergyman in Boston who
both breaches and practices. He breaches
on Sunday and practices (medicine) the
rest Of the week.
A MAN from the country visited all the
stores in Jasper, Ind, recently, to buys
divorce. He was told they were "just out
Of divorces, but would have full supply
in a few days."
A LONDON merchant, lately deceased,
left legacy of EGO to Gloucester school.
master who once gave him thrashing
that had been lifelong benefit to him.?
"How much did he leave?" inquiries
gentleman Of wag on learning the death
of wealthy citizen. Everything" re.
spOnded the wag he didn't take dolIr
with him."
THE following expressive notice is post.
ed on the closed door of Brooklyn cob
bler's shop: "Thes beznies Is klozd ful
aa week tn elou thea Dos A chanz ter b
six"
A QUAKER's advice to his son on his
wedding day: When thee went court.
ing, l told thee to keep thy eyes wide
open now that you art married, | tell
thee to keep them half shut"
AN exchange says: eve are in receipt
of two poems, one on the 'Throsbng
Brain and the other on Beating Heart
We will wait until we receive one on The
Stomach Ache, and publish all three
together"
A LEARNED man has said that the hard
est words to pronounce in the Enghsh
language are, 1" / made mistake" When
Frederick the Great wrote to the Senate;
II have just lost battle, and it's my own
fault" Goldsmith says: 81 his confession
showed more greatness than his victories
THE aggregate sum paid to AlexandG
Dumas, ST., by publishers and theatrl@i
managers in the course of his long Literary
career, exceeds three millions and hal
francs. The amount which will be paM
to his heirs on his plays in France, is esu.
mated at fifteen thousand francs a veal
Dumas died largely in debt to his publish
ers. Michel Levy, Of Paris, alone IS sao
to lose by his death one hundred and MY
thousand francs.
A LESSON.
LAST night weighed, quite wearied out,
The question that perplexes still;
And that sad spirit we call doubt
Made the good naught beside the III.
This morning, when with rested mind
I try again the self same theme,
The whole Is altered, and find
The balance turned, the good supreme.
A little sleep, brief nights rest,
Has changed the look of all that Is!
Sure any creed hold at best
Needs humble holding after this.
In New Zealand, it is said, surface Wss
is entirely gone from large tracts, some
times covering 5000 square miles ~
months, and even for years. The resn. .
becomes SO utterly dry as to forbid W.
possibility, apparently, of any survival ~
frog life. And yet these reptiles Zee seem w y 3
beat the cat for tenacity of life; 10. To-
wherever rain falls sufficiently to Ill ~
water. holes they are found to swarm WIN.
frogs and this when immediately preyIou'