Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1871-01-06
Trials Of 4 witness.

once as a genuine complaint of some un-
happy witness, it is SO very like the real
thing:
Mr.. Punchinello: AS all people seem
to come to you with their troubles and
grievances, / hope you will not refuse to
listen to my woes. And whether they
are woes or not, | leave you to judge tor
yourself. AT the beginning of last week
| made my FIRST appearance in any court
room in the character of witness, in
the case of Valentine against Orson, In
which the point in dispute was the own
ership of tract of land in Wyoming
territory. l knew something in regard
to the sale of these lands, and was fully
prepared to testify to the extent Of my
knowledge in the premises; but judge of
my utter surprise aud horror, on being
obliged to go through such an ordeal as
the following extracts from my examina-
ton will indicate;-
The counsel for the plaintiff eommeuc-
ed by asking me if | was married man
and when | had answered that was, he
said -
Is your wife believer in the princi-
pies of the womau's rights party2
could not, for the life, see what this
had to do with the land in Wyoming,
but l answered that ! was happy to say
she was not.
The examination then proceeded as
follows -:
@. You are happy, then, in your mat
rimonial relations? A. Yes-(and re-
membering the OATH reasonably SO.
@. Is your wife prettyf A. Wit
ness remembering at once his oath and
his wife's presence in court She is pret-
ty pretty.
What are her rdefects2 A. Witness
remembering only his wife's presenee)-
have never been able to discover them.
@. Do you wear hannels A. Yes ;
, in winter.
@. Can you testify upon your oath
, that you do not wear fannels in sum-
mer? A. can.
II @. Now be careful in your answers.
: What do you wear in the spring and
fall A. I-I-wear my common
f clothes.
/ @. With flannel, or without flannel ?
: A. Sometimes with, and sometimes
without.
ii @. No evasion; you must tell the
court exactly when you wear flannel, and
when you do not.
a Series of questions on this subject
brought out the fact that wore flannel
, when the weather was cold, or cool; and
/ did not wear it when it was mild, or
warm.
III @. Have you lightning rod on your
E house? A. have.
ii @. How much did it cost you to have
: tput ups A. II has not cost me any
/. thing yeti owe for it.
Il @. Is that all you owe for2 A. No
: have other debts.
G. Have you any money with you
/ nov? A. Ihave
4 @. How much? A. Counting con-
!. tents OF portmonaie) Sixu-two cents.
@. Where did you get that? A
. with embarrassment, | borrowed it.
I. @. Were you present when defendant
! first offered his land for sale to the plain
tiff?
!. A. (Br:ghtening up was.
@. Have you ever oeen vaccinated
A. | have.
81 @. On which arm ? A. The left.
s @. At the time of the first mention
: of this land to the plaintiff, who were
. present? A. Witness speaking will
. hopeful vivacity, as if he hoped they
4 We're now coming to tthe merits of tn,
case.) The plaintiff, the defendant aDc
. myself.
al @. Do you use the Old Dominion
i coffee pot in your house? A. (Deject
edly.) No, sir.
+ @. What kind of coffee-pot do 20,
use? A. A common tin one.
:. @. Are you willing to swear it is tin
: A. lam.
: Q. Has your wife any sisters? A.
= She has two; Anna and Jane.
: O. Are they married. A. Thel
- are.
: @. Are either of them as pretty a
your wife?
Sel A. (QuickIy) No, sir.
" @. Have you any children? A.
! Two.
: @. Have they had themeasles? A
= They have.
" @. Has any other person in you
house had the measles? A. | haveha'
them, and my wife has had them.
ii @, How do you know your wife ha
"A had them? A. She told me so.
,el q. Then you did not see her hav
AZ them? A. No, sir.