davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
ADVERTISING. TERMs.
Tanning Of the Bridegroom .

Tanning of the Bridegroom.
Mr.. Spillman had just mar
ried a second wife. On thN
day alter the wedding Mr.. S.,
remarked:
al intend, Mrs, Spillman, to
enlarge my dairy" %
"You mean our dairy, my
dear,' replied Mrs. Spillman.
"NO," iquoth Mr.. srillman,
81 intend to enlarge my dalry
"Say our dairy, Mr.. SpiIlman."
"No, my .dairySi al ,.
'Say our dairy, say our-~
screamed she, seizing the po-
ANer' .i .rI7-r2 Z1t IT
"My dairy, my dairyla yelled
the husband, s..j ,e.., e,i.J
-"our dairy! our dairyr,! cried
the wife, emphasizing each
word by a blow on the back OF
her crying spouse.
Mr.. Spillman retreated un-.
der the bed. In passing under
the bedclothes his hat was
brushed of. He remained un-
der the cover several minutes,
waiting for a lull in the storm.
Atlast his wife saw HIM thrush,
ing his head out at the foot OF:
the bed, much like a turtle
from its she'll. El .1 ....
"Whatare you looking fort"
exclaimed the lady ...a a
"I am looking for our hat,
my DEAR" said he. .-
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

APRoPos of the many rem le-
dies proposed for prevent ng
boiler explosions, the Lou is-
vile Courier'Journal says the
only absolutely sure way to
keep them from exploding is to
fill them with ice water and
set them in cool place.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

The Boston Post having veu,-
tured to express the belieftha t
"it is wrong 10 fly to one ex. /.
treme to correct another" th,e
New York Commercial AdveI /.
User hastens to reply tn, t
"every disobedient, pigheads d
urchin in the land will indor Sc
that sentiment" Lss.t
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

H.T. hELNB0LDS EXTRACT BUCHU
CURES diseases ARISING FROM lMPRU-
DENCEA, HABITS OF DISSIPATION, ETC,
Ia all their stages, ut little expense, little or
no change ia diet, no Inconvenience, and no
exposure. 1t causes frequent desire aud
gives strength To urinate, thereby removing
obstrictions, preventing and curing structures
of the urethra. Allaying pam and inflammation,
soirequent IN this class OF diseases, and ex-
pellingall POISONOUS matter.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

PENNSYLVANIA went INTO the
late canvass with a resolution
in the Republican State platS
form indorsing not only the
administration, but indorslng
Grant specially and by name
for renomlnation in 1872. Re.
suit: majority on State ticket
quadrupled. IiF odi5 4 sivts s.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

Full and explicit directions accompany the
medicines, 10 lIfSoJfl i2u l.
Evidence ofthe most responsible and relia-
BILE character furnished on application, with
hnpdreds ef thousands Of living witnesses,
sad Upward OF 30, 400 Unsolicited certificates
and recomendstory letters, many (which are
from the highest. sources. including eminent
phEsisispb, elergymeu, stateemep,r etc. The
proprietor has never resorted TO their publica-
from khe TACT that bis articles rank as standard
preparations and do not need to be propped
up By certificates.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
HenryIT. Helm bOld's Genu-
q Inc Preparations. u Z.

Delivered 10 any addrsss secure from obser-
'rssf, rssSsfE,AaLlsHsp vpwlRp OF TWENTY
YEARS. asoId by Druggi sts svergwherel Ad-
dress letters for information in confidence 10
HENRYT. HELMB0ID, Druggist and Chem
SSplyi Deposs. n! u, helm BoLp,sl Drug
essis sefasf f. Ii 81 sSsadssE Ms.
ssa9fRs i0t so4i9 Rnsh i stFs''' PhllfdelTT edT
MWABE, OF 1QuETHRElITs, Ask tey
EESgY. DRsLMso Gpel TAKE no
cTHsE = D CE,-l. e NI IsmT
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

MISSOURI is certainly remark.
able for its mineral wealth. 1t
has iron in As counties, lead irl
43, coal in 36, copper in 2+,
marble in II, zinc in 81, fire..
clay in 16, barytes in 10, nickel
in 6, besides granite, tin, plum.
bago, gypsum, alum and anti
mony. u .l
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

PAREpA charged two dollars
a ticket for her Boston concerts,
and it took but a very short
time to count up the money
at the box office when the con.
cert was over. ef.'
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

The Nashua (Iowa) Post
says: "Here is a new wheat
item for 1871. The wheat was
sowed on the Mckee farm, this
township, April I1&il 1t was
harvested July is, threshed
July 10, ground July 19, by
Dellinger Brothers, baked by
Mrs. Wilson July 20, and good
bread it was too. Bread from
the seed in three months and
two daysl"
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

WTAHTED-Agents and peddlers to sell
wv thoroughly good domestic article wanted
IN every family. No competition. Exclusive
territory given. Business very pleasant
Agents have sold dozen, netting $50 profit
per day. One solj $50 IN small town, anoth.
or 1000 IN five towns, another 81 in calling on
SO families. 0utht So. No danger ofimposi.
tiop,.. Best Of references gwen. Send for cir.
cnlsr to lO2 Washington street, Boston, Mass.
y nasriteow blTTtEFiELp& DANE.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

A YOUNG gentleman of Chi
cago fell in love with a hotel
waiter girl, but love fed iro m
that once fond heart when he
found the a"sweet little thing"
cutting her toe nails with a
butter knife in the kitchen.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
M I, ,
MI
HENRY T.. MELMBOLD'S
CONCENTRATED
FLUID EXTRACT BUCHU,
THE GREAT DIURETIc

Aas onred every case Of diabetes in which IL
,lr,- been given Irritation OF the neck cf the
bladder aAd inhaina don OF thek dneys, ulcer
,Ahon, ,ofthe kidneys aud .had,i,r, retentio OF
urine, Diseases oiitheprostrtte gland, stone in
the bladder, calculus, gravel, brlcksdust de-
post and mucous or milky discharges, and
for enfeebled and dol cate constitution, vi both
,sexss ,,aits led SviLhthe follow ing gym ptoms:
ijndispo POSITION nuotesertion, lloss0f power, loss OF
memory, ,'dl fiiouley' ofbTeathing, weak nerver,
ltrembli M, hOuror0f, ,disease, wakeiu lness,d dim
iness 'df Vision, pam In che back, hot hands,
flushing ofthe body DdwneeHGf,th the skin, erup
tlon OIL the h,ce, ,,p,Jli ~ lHOunIenRuc nnversal
Jsssltu'ie Of the muscular system, etc.
Used byPeFsons irOm,tDe ages .uf eighteen
SS twenty-five, and from thirty ii veto hit tive
or n the decline or change Of lite; alter con
lan, Ineut or labor palms, bed.weLtlny in chL'
,dFsn.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
Equal to Mark Twain.
Newspaper Writers will thor,

take from the Philadelphia
Dispatch: aa 0l.ooli
"A week or two ago one of
our reporters had occasion to
refer to a certain woman, whom
we vii call Hannah Smith, as
a denizen Of the Eleventh
Ward. A day or two afterward
a hugeman entered the Office
with his brow clothed with
thunder. In his hand he car
ried a fearful club, and at bis
side trotted a bull dog whom
hunger 9 had evidently made
desperate. With vthht quick
appreciation Of the situation
which is creditable to the su-
periorintelligshce of educsted:
men, the editor of this paper
and the proprietors darted 10
the window, climbed outside,
slid down the lightning rod,
and went across the street to
watch the bloody fray through
a spy-glass. With a fearless
ness of conscious innocence
We sat still, merely inserting
our legs in two sections Of
stove pipe, to guard against
any apprehension of facts on
the part Of the bulldog. The
man with the club approached.
"Are you the editor:n he
asked, splitting on his hand and
grasping his club.
We told him that the editor
was out; that lie had gone to
the north pole with Captain
Hall, and that he would not
return before 1876, in time for
the .ennial celebration.
9Are you the proprietor"
asked the man.
We explained 10 him that
we were not, that the proprie.
tors were also out; that they
had gone to South America for
the purpose of investigating
the curative properties OF the
cundurango, and they expected
to be there for several years.
"Well, whoever you are" ex.
claimed the warrior, my name
is Smith"
We told him we were glad;
because, if there was one
thing better than the possess
sion of the name of Smith, it
was the privilege of knowing a
man of that name. "But,
Smith," we said, "why this bat.
tie array9 1t is absurd tor a
man to put on the panoply of
war and frisk into editors
sanctums fumbling a club and
accompanied by a dishearten>
ing bull dog, simply because
his name happens TO be Smith"
He said he called In to burst
the head of the man who had
insulJed his sister.
ut is impossible, Smith, that
such a thing could have been
done by any one in this office"
sit is, but it was, though;
and her name was published,
too. Miss Hannah Smith"
"May we be permitted to in.
quire, Mr.. Smith, what was the
precise character OF the affront
offered to Hannah9"
swell, you see," said Mr..
Smith, "the blackguard said
she was a denizen. And I want
you to understand" said Smith,
becoming excited, and bran
dishing his club in a wild man.
ner over our head, while the
bull dog advanced and COM
menced to sniff up and down
our stove,pipe-'g wans you to
understand she is a decent
young woman, with a good
character, and none OF your
denizens and such truck. The
man who says she Is a denizen
is q blackguard and thief and
I'll smash, him over the nose il
A. oat,ifhn nhonna Thav m a y,
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
Lands for Sale at Low Prioesl
Look Here -

A LII parsons owing me on SherrifI's fees
Hand dues, and also notes and book ac.
counts sre netihed 10 call on me without fir.
ther delay In order that they may save u em-
selYes further troublei J,J.sHocKEy,. /,
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

Two Englishmen have been
eaten by the FIians, who.
speak highly of their tenler.
ness and gamey flavor.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
word "denizen" gives such

word "denizen" gives such a
person an unoffending charac-
ter, and deprives it of every.
thing like reproacb, Smith
said he was satisfied, and he
shook hands and kicked the
bull dog down stairs. The ed
itorS and proprietors, seeing
that all was safe, Immediately
climbed the lightning rod and
soon appeared at the window,
where they were introduced to
Smith, with the remark. that
they had returned from the
North Pole and the cline of
the cundurango somewhat un,
expectedly, in order to sur
prise their relations.
And now we suppose Smith
will be mad because we have
told This story about him. and
he will be coming down to in
terview us in wars magnif-
cent stern array with a fresh
bull dog. But it will be in
vain. We have rented an Of
flee in the top of the shot tow.
er, and have planted torpedoes
and spring guns all the way
up the stairs. We warn this
incendiary Smith to beware
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

OCHb etCIu array With " lT6Sn
bull dog. But it will be in
vain. We have rented an of
flee in the top Of the shot tow.
or, and have planted torpedoes
and spring guns all the way
up the stairs. We warn this
incendiary Smith to beware
Incidents of the Chicago Fire.
The fearful state of society,
which requires the strong arm
of military law to hold it in
check, is but another evidence
of widespread generalization
in the i'll fated city.
Gen. Sheridan, with 1000
soldiers from Omaha, has taken
il upon himself to crush out
lawlessness and preserve peace
and order among the suffering
population SO far as in his pow.
er lies. The dispatches state
with grave horror the method
adopted to accomplish this.
Thieves, pillagers, and incen-
diaries are not arrested. More
than fifty have been shot down
in the streets or swung to the
lamp posts at five minutes
notice.
Former reports with refer
ence to the probable loss OF
life Sc EN- about to be confirmed.
Already ninety blackened
corpses have been removed
from the ruins, and but a small
portion OF the burnt district
has been searched. Doubtless
there are many who will never
be distinguished from the heaps
Of ashes and debris into which
they fell. Meanwhile sad re-
ports are reaching US of deaths
IN large numbers from expo
sure and over-excitement. The
weak and delicate, the invalids,
and the woman and children
have suffered excruciatin gly.
Out on the bleak prairie, with
no shelter save heavens can>
opy, it is not strange that many
have died. 1t is SAID that hun.
dreds have succumbed to these
terrible Affections. The danger
of starvation seems to be over,
Car load after car load Of pro.
visions have poured in from
every city in the West, while
tons and tons Of supplies Of all
kinds are now rushing in t. ON
the eastward. * n
Just now occurred a scene
that froze our blood. At the
intersection of Randolph and
Market streets was a large
building Callom's) used for of.
fees. The janltor resided on
the fourth floor with his family,
consisting of a wife and four
children. BY some means they
were unable to escape. Sur
ronnded by the fire, they as
cended to the roof. The babe
was in the mothers arms, and
another child, a little boy,
clung to her skirts. Two girls
were clasped in the arms of the
father. Their shouts were but
family heard over the howl ;
the heat became SO intense that
the woman was overcome and
fell to the roof. The father
wildly threw out his hand and
staggered, writhed, and sunk
by his wife's side. That was
all 81, that tragedy. We sick,
ened at the sight. and hurried
down to the street, which by
this time was pretty we'll dc.
serted. Then along the banks
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

A LOT of one hundred and
twenty hogs, that averaged.
425 pounds, were shipped frosn
this point to9Ithe East, tins
week. James Ioughry was
the owner.n2 CsrcleciJis Uniag.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

.nFRIENDsBIrS which are born
in misfortune, are more firm
and lasting than those which
are formed in happiness! la.t4
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

lraappears from statistics at
the Land Department that
nineteen Y thousand ! settlers
made bona fde entries on pub
lie lands last year. Since the
passage of the Homestead Act
in 1862 there have been one
hundred o thousand entries.
These alone make twenty thou
sand more landholders than
there are in Great Britain. Thi,i
is a significant tact that will
not be without its influence on
the history of each nation.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

In Colorado a. bald perst n
finds himself allnaed stogasi"a
man 81. ".su his head above tim
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21
Tne Administration Triumph

AhC AuHlhloIVUJlOH AElInpn-
The grand tide Of Republican
success has swept resistlessly
from the Atlantic to the Pacific,
assuring another Presidential
triumph in 1872. Everywhere
the direction OF the popular
current is strongly manifested.
California, Democratic for
years past, has astonished US
by its liberal majority on the
Republican side. Maine has
largely increased the majority
of last year. The recent local
elections in Connecticut have
resulted in very significant Re.
publican gains all over the
State. Now come the October
elections, telling the same
story. Ohio, with $4,000 ma
jority, revives the brighter po.
litical record of other days:
and Pennsylvania, with "Grant's
denomination" inscribed on the
Republican banners, has come
out of the conflict more tri-
umphantly victorious than for
years before. roy ,e.s
So 1t is on every hand. Our
Republican Administration is
thoroughly sustained by the
people. Grant, the National
President wins the Gay, over
all his enemies as signally as
Grant, the Union General, car.
ried all before him in the field,
until every hostile gun was
silenced.
Pennsylvania affords an un,
mistakable test of the popular
feeling in favor. of Grapt's re
election. His renomipation
may now be set down as an as,
sured fact. His reelection by
a greater majority than he re.
ceived In 1858 is as certain as
any political event in the
future can be. Such is the
lesson of the brilliant Republi
can victories of September and
October.--Cm. Chronicle.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

OF the lake we wandered, more
like dead than living men. We
heard and saw mourning and
agony and suffering that all
the books in the world could
not hold the &C cunt qoG We
were comfortably fixed in life
one week ago; now we are pen.
niless. We have no doubt that
incendiaries did part of the
work, and for robbery and
ravage. T lt*ys $3.50 y
One among the thousand
rumors that were flying thick.
ly about, and the widest it
would seem it must be, was OF
the sudden vengeance that be.
fell Q bold thief Seeing the
cashier of one Of the banks rush
into his office as the flames
were bearing, almost upon the
building, he watched his exit.
1t was pobl long before the Of
fetal appeared with his arms
full of money packages and
bonds, and no sooner had he
appeared than the thief pros
trated him with a blow upon
the side of the head, and grab
bed a portion of the treasure.
A policeman in an instant saw
what was done and grabbed
the villain, who drew q pistol
and shot the rushed officer
through the excited crowd
brandishing his pistol and EN-,
deavoring to make good his
escape. But the sight, had
maddened the bystanders to
frenzy, and they fell upon the
wretch like so many tigers, tear.
ing him limb from limb and lit
orally dlsemboweling him.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

Being prepared expressly for the above com
plants, its blood purifying properties ar
greater than any other preparation OF saI a,~
Aarllia. IL gives the complexion clear and
healthy color and restores the patient 10 II
rtate cfheallh and purity. For purifying the
blood, removing all ihTOnic constitutional dis
eases arsing from NJ Inpnre stste of the
blood, AMI the Dnly reliable and etiectllal
kuown remedy for the cure Ol pains and swell
ing OF the bones, ulGeratlons ,of. the throat sni
legs, blO.h,s, pmples on the face, eryslpeaS
>and all scsly erupiIOns al the skin, and beau-
Afymx the cOnpleIlen.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1871-10-21

QFFIeR--<F, W. Corner a stAin and
t0gaa stese Opposite Court Aopss| )
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-08-19
Roll OF Honor.

The undersigned, principal Of the Utica Pub.
lie school. takes pleasure in placing upon the
Roll Of Honor the following names OF pupils who
were neither tardy nor absent during the late
term, commencing May 1st and ending July 3lst
not rARDY.
Anna Steiner, Iphoeene Irwin, Efie Alden,
Truman Clark, Minnie Irwin, Monte White,
Libbie Holman, John Grace, Maggie Neary,
James Shuero, Katie Hughes, Jennie Carbon,
George Culver, Christopher Morrow. William
Kericoin. Thomas Dugan, Abbie Call, Sarah Fitz.
Simmons, Mary MoC.rsy, Katie McCarty, Lizzie
Carbon, Eliza Hannou, Garry Heelsy, Raa.a
Bray. Thoma. spillane, John Spillane, John
Shay. Walter Mccullough, Michael Cavannuvh,
James Conghliu, Patrick Hughes, Dennis .rlon,
Miron McGunigAl, John Ceughlin. John Fitz.
Simmons. William FitzSimmous, Michael Cars,n,
Peter keliher. Edith Halliday, Johnny Reed,
Thomas Stephenson, Martin Hughes, Johnny
Haily, Willie Hsily, James Marsell, Mary
Hughes, William Sslliards, Dennis McCsrty, 10.
hanna NoC.rty, Patrick Couvhliu. Anna Hard.
Willie Cole. Lola Nicoum, Mary Wiley.
NOT ABSENT.
Anna Steiner, Jennie Taylor, Iphogone T. in,
Michael Reed, Libbie Holman. Jennie G. lion,
Emma Smith, Ella Hughes, Ernest,ne Irwin
Nsttis Irwin. Frank Halliday. Eddie Hickey,
Anna Kelley, Edith Halliday, Johnny Reed.
J. n. DAY, Principal.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-08-19

Nc'rlCt.-s proposals for putting down curb
~ stones Oh the and sides Ot Columbus street.
from Main Columbus street bridge In accordance
with order OF City Council passed Nay 6t ISL Will I've
day september 9TH ISL at which time said proposals Will
be submitted o City Council Tor action on tho same.
In pursuance said order curb to be put down
each side OF that portion OF Columbus street between
the Illinois aud Michigan Canal and the north hc OF Main
street. except that part curbed Said curb stones are to
be feet and Inches In DEPTH hve inches In width ess
ed the top md six inches depth the ousdc and two
inches In depth on the Inside, and shall BE- 60 placed ;a; the
outer line OF the shall he fourteen feet nom the lines
bounding the sides Of said street and that top line OF the
shall conform to the grade OF sidewalks on SAID street,
established ny City Surveyor. H. n. WATERMAN,
0ttawa, August w. ISL. CITY Clerk.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-08-19

nant. patronizing look on the part Of Murphy.
Solemnity on the phis Of BsensA Hand shak-
ing between Professor and Director; then the
following:
"Profssor, I An only one Of this honorable
Board Of Rdication that 70 ses before 70. though
I'm dsrietor Of the fifth ward, - our worthy
Clerk has jist informed - have rid your Lit.
Ter. Pro6sssr. in which 70 AZ this honorable
Board of Edication to give 70 . school to taeh.
I see from your litter, Professor, ys're . man Of
great edication, spanking in many tongues,
and don't expect a princely salary 1t is due to
ye to say, Professor, that I'm PLACED wild ye.
(The Professor smiles and bows.) I have NO
doubt yell pass very cOrrict and satisfactory
examination. and its meself, the derictor of the
fifth ward, thstll give ye an arrest support. II
ye git q school to tsch, Professor, from this
honorable Board of Education of which I'm de-
rictor from the fifth ward, AS was said before, I
have bat one requist to make Of ye, Professor,
and this make, Professor, to be
faithful to me promise to me constituents Of
the fifth ward of which am derictor, as was
said some time ago. This request is, Professor,
that in every thing ye say ye be strictly uusec-
tartan. Do ye understand me. Profissor?"
The Professor mods and Murphy falls back
in his chair exhausted. Billy Gresgor runs and
gets piece of Joe and puts it on his DIRECTORS
head to cool him of.
Beemus catches the Professors hand again
he had dropped it moment to take chew of
tobacco-and moves on to Hit.
Introduction similar to the last, followed in.
stsntly by
HA.-"Afton, do you teach fornix 2"
AttOn.-"Teach what, director Hitt!"
HN.-"Fornix, by -"
Afton.-"I teach anything, director"
Ma-"Yours the man for US; that's all,
Alton"
Here the Board rise, the Professor and Bee.
mus fall back toward the door, still hold Of hands
the Professor all the while bowling, and the cur.
| tain falls