The true northerner., 1871-05-26
ONE OF GOGGS STORIES.
BY ELIZABETH STUART PHELPS.
,oops I" said the Professor.

BY ELIZABETH STUART PHELPS.
"Goggs ~ said the Professor.
Goggs jumped. 1t was quite time
The Professor had called him twice al
ready. If it had been anybody but
Goggs he would not have been called
again. AS it was. he came out of his
brown study half second too late he
had lost his place and his wits together,
by the time that the Professor said:
Translate !"
"I-woud-eat," said Goggs; and
stopped.
'f-would-eat," said Goggs again
and stuck.
What would Goggs have eaten? No
body knew much better than Goggs.
The fellows all turned to the textbooks,
while Goggs stopped and stuck. He had
stopped in the middle of an enlivening
little story, which ran something like
this:
A gentleman (Goggs thinks it was
Darius) asked another gentleman (Goggs
thinks that must have been a barbarian),
q couple of dozen centuries more or less
ago, when people were not as particular
about their diet as they are now, what
inducement he would take to eat his
father and mother? Said the dutiful
son, 4" would not eat my parents for
anything"
Said Goggs-only Goggs could have
said it-said Goggs, looking up into the
Professors face with cheerful conf
dence
~ 'oOuld eat my parents for nothing,
SIR l''
That's sufficient, sir p said the Pro
fessor.
In half an hour that story was all
over college. Everybody agreed that it
was the best thing of the term. Goggs
himself was inclined to think So sitting
ruefully in his room tipping back in his
chair to think about it after dinner.
Goggs was rueful for more reasons
than one Ia fact, his Greek blunder
was the least of his troubles,-it was too
funny to trouble him very much. In
deed, he had only made it in the help
less despair of far more appalling
grief.
Next week was Calculus Examination.
Whether he should fall down stairs and
break his arm; whether he should visit
the city hospital in hopes of smallpox
case to which he might lawfully and be-
nevolentlv expose himself; whether he
should take prussic acid or have the
cramp in swimming how it would an
swer to commit some petty theft, and so
get safely into the lookup till Examina-
tion week was over; if his sister would
only have typhoid fever, and telegraph
for him to come on What would hap
pen if he should "bar out for few
days in the coal closet, with hole in
the door for his chum to stick his din
ner through? What would be the eff
feet of losing his property that week Che
had fifty dollars in Grand Smash Rail
road bonds), and of being suddenly
summoned to New York to look after
it? How would it strike the Professors
impressible fancy if he should 90 to
sleep with his feet in pail of cold wa
ter some night and have diphtheria
These, and many other equally ingeni-
Gus reflections had filled the soul of
Goggs, when the Greek Professor put to
him the delicate question about his pa
rents.
These, and many even sadder refec-
tions filled the soul Of Goggs, sitting
alone in his room, tipping back in his
chair, after dinner.
A big brown boy, who headed the
wrong end of his class, came in while
Goggs was sitting alone.
"Hilloav ~ said he.
80, it's you, is it ?" said Goggs, more
surprised than pleased the brown boy
was not in his " set" in fact had never
been in his room before. It's you, is
it? Well Sit down, then"
The brown boy sat down then, with
out waiting for more gracious invita-.
ton.
"Hilloa p said he again.
"Well ?" said Goggs, gloomily.
"Met Sky blue up Chapel to-day"
said the brown boy with a confidential
nod "She was got up gorgeous, tell
you."
" All ?' said Goggs, more gloomily
than ever He did not like this. 1t did
not strike his fancy to talk Sky.blue y
with this Peters boy. "Sky-blue was
such a wee, white, soft, dainty little lady
and Peters was so big and brown. So he
only said:
"Ah ?"
"IIilloa ~ said Peters again, when he
found that he could do nothing with
"Sky-blue."
"Well p said Goggs again.
What would you give to get graf
at those Calculus papers this week p
"Td give-fifty dollars J" said Goggs
thinking of his railroad bond. He
brought his chair down hard on its four
legs.
!" Would you, though ~ said Peters
smiling peculiarly. "Just pnt your