The Tipton advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Cedar Co., Iowa) 1856-1962, 1871-11-02
How Seth Hawkins Won His Wife

Seth Hawkins was a. fine specimen
Of manhood as can be seen-tall, broad
shouldered, well proportioned, eyes Of
the deepest blue, light hair and ruddy
countenance, which betokened famil-
iarity with out door occupation. Suffice
it to say, he was farmer and well to do
in this worlds goods, but afflicted with
a disease called bashfulness.
He was deeply in love with a pretty,
sparkling, roguish-eyed lass, whom we
shall call Sally T.
Seth could talk politics, farming, and
upon all the usual topics of the day,
when not in Sally company but when
he really became seated in her presence,
his courage left him, and he left all the
conversation to Sally, answered only in
| monosylabIes.
The latter guessed how matters stood
with him, and, in a spirit of mischief,
| increased his embarrassment by several
little remarks, which almost drove him
to distraction, and made him think his
case was hopeless.
He had courted Sally a long time, had
never found sufficient courage to know
his fate.
One pleasant Sunday evening he
-allied forth, determined to know the
worst, and to ask Sally to be his. He
found lei sitting by bright, blazing
fire in the kitchen, and looked prettier
than ever, with her rosy cheeks and
laughing eyes. Her mother sat in an
old fashioned rocking chair, reading her
bible, while a candle, sitting on a stand
close by, served to light the apartment.
She seated him in Il chair near the
fire, and after making few remarks, to
which he gave the usual monosyllabical
answers, he looked up and caught
Sally's eye, and she Immediately turned
her head, with u smile.
He felt the blood rush to his head and
face, as he scanned his person over to
see if he could see the cause of her
mirth, when 10! on turning his head
half round he discovered some white
cloth behind him.
A\o" VIC HuCStlOIl W NtS-Wilal IL cOlllu
be-
He waited another opportunity, ani
when Sally was not looking, put his arm
behind him, and slipping his hand un-
der the edge of his jacket proceeded to
push it down into the back of his pants.
He felt a relief, and on looking up
perceived that Sail y was convulsed with
compressed laughter.
He looked around again and, to his
utter astonishment, found that, instead
of the cloth disappearing, it seemed
larger than before.
The Precipitation started at every pore,
and with a quick, nervous push, he
made another effort to get it out of sight.
Another opportunity presented itself,
when he made a finish Of it, and, with
the Precipitation standing in drops all
over his forehead, he felt almost out of
patience with Sally for building such IA
hot fire.
AT the moment of his disappearance,
Sally, who had been watching things
on the sly, burst into a loud peal of
laughter, and rushed into the room ad
joining, giving the door loud slam,
which caused the old lady to look up
with astonishment, and Seth to seize
his hat and rush from the house toward
home, as fast as his legs could carry him,
and in anything but a happy frame of
mind.
a 10 1,a,
and her mother demonstrated with her
upon her unchristianlike conduct upon
the Sabbath evening.
Sally bore it with as much composure
as possible, but said nothing to her
mother Of the cause Of her mirth.
Pretty soon the old lady made prepa-
rations for bed, and soon began to search
for her night gown but falling to find
it, came out of the bedroom, s.ying
" Sally, where is my night dresso |
left it somewhere, and can't tell for
the life of me where.'
Why Seth Hawkins wore it home:'
she replied.
What wore it homeo'
Amid tears and laughter, Sally ex-
planned the events Of the evening to her
mother.
The next afternoon Il boy raped at
the door, and presented package for
Miss Sally, which she soon opened, and
found the unlucky night dress, all
nicely washed and ironed, with the fol-
lowing words signed, " Paul" written
on bit of paper, in pencil: 81 am
much obliged for the use of it,
The next time they met, he found his
bashfulness had disappeared, aud before
leaving Sally, he had gained her con-
sent to be his own little wife