Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1871-08-08

- W hen lady c0ndeScends to i practical
joke it is generally very neat one ~ Bon
cort, the rich iuancicr, was very stingy to his
wife in the matter ot pin-mopey. Oue day
lady, closely yelled and very anxious not TO be
recognized, called upon him and borrowed
large sum, leaving her diamonds IS a pledge.
1t was his wife.
-"EPhraim Johnson" sends the following,
notice of ''dissolution" to the Louisville Sua
Ode coParsnips heretofore resisting twix me
and Nose Jones am heretofore resolved. Does
what owes de fra will please call on de scribe
Does what dc tir:n owes will please call ca
Jones, AS d. frm am irrisolyed,"
y little boy and girl had been cautioned
never to take the nest egg when gathering, the
eggs; but enc day she girl reached the nest
first, seized an egs aud started for the house
Her disappointed brother followed, crying
Mother, Mother. Susy she's been and got the
egg the old hen measures by"
Jonathan, where were you going yes
terday when l saw you going to the mill -
Nv ny, was goin, to the mill, to be sure"
"Well, wish Ia seen you. Id got you to
carry grist for me-" why, you did see
me, didn't your Yes, but not until you
got clean out Of sight"
- An agricultural society offered pre-
MUM for the best means of irriyaii2a. a
farmer, reading it irritation, took his wife to
the fair, feeling sure he would win the prize
-"BOy," said an i'll tempered old fellow
to noisy lad, "whas are you hollerin' for
when [ am going by ?" "Humph," returned
the boy, what are you going by for when 1
am ho!lerin 20
-Sherif's officers are said to be the kind
est men in the world they never Us ! pro-
tessional custom, leave man whom they may
find in distress.
Dispatches from various points in Colo
RADIO are delayed by the inconvcuient habit the
settlers haze vi hanging horse. thieves to the
telegraph wires.
-Stiggius, the newly married man, SAYS
that his wife is j perfect rose. The only draw
back in his happiness is that she blows OUT
leetle too often.
- Scene in indianapolis: els Mrs. Smith
at home p "No, but walk in. size has Jus,
stepped ont to get divorce, AID will lie back
IN few moments
The question of the day is, whether i.
IS more dIthcuIt toT girl OF the period to get
her clothes in her trunk or Ecr trunk in her
clothes.
= y Buffalo girl in response to the Cal
AOEoIa cry OF come over anu marry US saws,
"Send your tickets if you mean what yOu say -
- Why is woman trying her corset like
the man drinking to drown care 2 because
In SO IacIng herself she becomes tight.
-"Jef, why am you like de cedar?" 81
guys it up, Sam; l can. tell ye'' Case We
stays green both summer and winter"
"A down,east editor says that since the
recent rains the farmers are smiling like new
shingles on a patched roof"
"A darkey who witnessed the explosion
Of shell for the first time exclaimed: See
dar =! hell hab laid an egg"
When may a man be said to be really
over head and ears in debt? Auswer-When
he hasn't paid for his wig.
When Patrick first tried peaches. he
said he liked the favor, but that the seeds Law
hard on his stomach
-Spurgeon thinks some ministers would
make good martyrs-tLey are so dry they
would burn we'll.
- An Irishman said he did not come 70
this country for want. He had abundance of
that at home.
-Paternal acres-the cid mans corns.