The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1871-10-20
sCrssORINGs.

If a woman cuts her nails of every
Monday, it is lucky forher- husband.
In Savannah you can get turtle eggs
for fifteen cents per dozen. But
would you?
It is no longer fashionable for
young ladies to receive presents be-
fore they are married.
The best way to improve the lot of
woman is to put good house on it
and q good man in the house.
The long curls on each side are to
take the place of the curls in the
back that have been worn SO long.
An Illino;san recently kissed the
hired girl while the wife was looking.
He viii be out again by Thanksgiv-
ing.
Josh Billings saws: .sIt is statisti-
cal fact that the wicked work harder
tew reach hell than the righteous do
tew reach heaven"
Who would forget this beautiful
suggestion which is found in the
mouth of Jennie Deans, in Eer ad-
dress to the Queen?
A married man in New-Haven on
Monday Joined the great society for
the promotion of domestic infelicity.
He ran away with another mans wife.
A Danbury grocer apologized to a
customer to whom he had sold a stale
egg that 'thens are so drove now
that they amt supposed to be as par
ticular as usual"
Johnny, what do you expect to do
for living when you get to be a
man? well. I reckon I'll get mar
ried and board with nay wife's moth
er."
The young men at the watering
places have discarded white vests.
The young ladies use so much oil on
their hair that vest is only good
for one evening on the piazza.
Be careful not to trust the person
who comes and tells you what so-and-
so says about you. It Is an old say
ing THAT they who fetch will also
carry.
THERE'S cave in bingham, \. 81. 3,
in which sufficient quantity of ice
freezes in Winter to supply the wants
of the neighboring farmers sii sum
mer. -aa--
The King of Italy las recently had
a narrow escape from death while
hunting wild boars. Numerous peo
pie have narrowly escaped suicide
under the operation of tame .bores.
A Bucolic Indiana wayfafer on a
Chicago train, being anxious to see
what be could see. thrust his head
out of the window and into. another
train. and nov shows signs of prema-
ture badness. arfs 7ft
Apropos of the many remedies for
preventing boiler explosions, tie
Louisville Couy-ier-yourn0i saws the
only absolutely sure way to keep
them from exploding is to FIJI them
with ice water and set them in cool
place 0
A man walking on the beach below
San Francisco, ON the 14th inst. no.
ticed bag living in the water, and
drawing it out and opening it, was
horrified to find that 1T contained four
ghastly human heads
AGeorgia game of baseball broke
I'D in the eighth inning with one arm
broken, one eye put ouf, one jaw dis
located. and eighteen fingers "shift-
ed" The game will be finished as
soon as the physicians think best.e.a
Mrs. Tabitha McGrath, aged, 100,
died recently in Ohio, leaving $50
descendants behind hel-that is. TO
say, / 71-100 descendants for each
year of her life. This estimate is pre-
pared by our neurological editor for
people who are fond of statistics. &
What whiskey may do is shown by
the st. Louis Democrat, which de
scribes how deputy United States
marshal got drunk, lost a prisoner, was
himself arrested by the police, was
dismissed by the Marshal, was put
off the cars and was killed, ali in one
day. - ,
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