Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1871-06-24
An Editor in Heaven.

Such is the caption of an article which has
been going the rounds of the papers for some
time, and which appears to be somewhat new
under the sun.
Just as if the editors were not in the habit Of
going to heaven! We'll venture TO say that a
greater portion of them go to that home of
those who have performed their mission of
mercy on earth, than any other profession or
calling that poor mortals I'll. p. in
"An editor in heaven p There's nothing
strange about that at all. It's almost moral
as well as professional impOssibility for them
to 90 anywhere else.
Once upon time, after the demise of a mem
Der of the "corps editorial" he presented him
self at the gate of the " Holy City" and re-
quested admission. The doorkceper asked him
what had been his occupation on teTrG t'mG.
He replied that he was an editor" "Well,
said the Watchman, eve have a crowd OF
your kind here now; and they all came in as
dead-heads" If you can pay your passage
you can come in. If not you must put your
self under the control of parsonage you ruled
down below, Cmeaning the devill Not hav-
ing the " wherswith to so in, our brother of
the "quill and scissors posted off and pre-
sented himself at the entrance of "Clooties
dark domains" A very dark compleZioned
gentleman stood sentry, and asked in a gruff
voice, "who comes ?" "An humble disciple
of Faust" was the calm reply. Then, hold
on, you can't be admitted, exclaimed the gen
teman in black" ey;ncing considerable agita-
ton, and fiercely scowing on him. Why
not" demanded the typo, who began to get
somewhat hufish," and looked around for a
" sleeps foot with which to force an en-
trance. ... ~.
We'll, sir, replied his sable majesty, we let
one of your professor in here many years ago,
aud he kept up continual row" With his
former delinquent subscribers, and as we have
more of that class here than any other. we
have passed a law prohibiting the admission
of any editors, only those who have advanced
our interest in their papers on earth, and even
those we keep in a separate room by them
selves.
You have published many things that op-
Grated against us, and always blamed the
Devil with everything that went wrong. so
you can't come IN. We enforce this rule
without respect to persons" for our own
peace and safety. You can just travel" >
Casting d.Oll leor at the outside sentinel,
our typographical friend started off again, de-
termined to get in above" This time he took
with him an old file of his paper, and present
ing it to the guardian Of the Celestial City re-
duesied that it might be carefully examined
and they would see whether he was entitled to
free ticket In the course of time, the con-
ductor came along and took him in, telling
him that he published many good things and
had been martyr to the cause Of human i'm
provement, and that resolutions had been
passed to admit all members ofthe art pre-
servatiye " who had abused the devil while
below. 1.. .
He added that as they were punished
enough by their being with the devil " all
their lives, the future punishment was COM
muted. He further stated that not one delin-
quent newspaper subscriber could be found in
heaven.