Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1871-12-07
Odds and Ends.


The first person singular-Adam.
Another cuphemism for bartender Is
'fusil artist
'Phoenixing' is what the Chicago pa
pers call the work OF rebuilding.
Two women are partners in the law
business in Kansas. They are sisters
in law.
The reporters interviewed Louisiana
prisoner until he begged piteously to be
hanged
Amateur sportsmeu out on hunt will
oblige Us by leaving their names and age
at this office. Danbury Netcs
Coroner's iuries at La Crosse call it
probable murder whena corpse is found
with seven stabs in the back.
A bachelor il politely described as a
man who has neglected his opportunity
OF making some poor woman miserable.
4 BROOKLYN girl Of fifteen is worth a
million of dollars. - TX. What would
BROOKLYN girl of eighteen be worth,
then;
iH'''iplt W DphiAii ANu ' lCiOria 4 IL
ton arr nominated for President and
Vice President by confused Western
editor.
.. give a. back our Bullosk
From hoof To horns complete
H' taitrned al our public erib
And now he Is our meat
-tAtantic sun.
FIJI has also had a revolution coup
defdt Or something, and 1heekambau
In, declared himself the Kaiser Ebe-
Hczer the time.
\ rural paper remarks: Cold nights
have put stop To gate sparkling Ifshe
doesn't ask YOU 10 come in now, you
had better quit"
An lrishman who was recently run
over bya whole train OF cars, got up and
aid hc . would not run another such
ri~k for tin dollars
The Titu,ville Herah depicts the
/ 'Lydian mclodie, falling from the lips OF
the blondes like pearls Il ON the mouth
OF a Tuscaloosa clam
4 musical wh-kcy bottle il the latest
/ combination OF art and convenience in
Macon, Georgia. Every body i drink
/ Ing out of it aud wondering.
The proprietor of Boston bone-mill
| AdvcrtIscs that " persons sending their
own bone, to be ground will bc attend
cd % with punctuality and dispatch.
Il hope lis hand is not counterfeit" ="
sald u lover. as hc was towing with his
sweetheart hand. "The best way to
find it out i to ring it" was the reply.
4 Western editor informs cores.
. t,at hf l. -
| compauying i marriage notice, signify
Thar the welded pair don't play poker
4 Boarding school Miss-"Oh, Charles.
/ expect 10 graduate ut next commence
lncnt." Graduate, What will YOU
| graduate in:" why, in white tulle."
A cergymen posted the following no.
| tcc on the gate of the church: Found
| Two hats in my straw berry bed The
owners can have the same by proving
property"
! Lady-"Can YOU wash and iron."
| Domestic ''Oh yes, IN; but your place
! wouldn't suit me unless Won knocked
| of wearing them long Holland dresses
! Of 4 morning
\ widower being asked his opinion of
| second marriages, said that as good
wife was gift from the Lord. it was
wise and right to repleuish as often as
! the supply gave out.
'Blind for tifty wears and the father
of eight children" was the placard fas-
tened around the neck of Young girl
| who WIS soliciting aims ia the streets o.
Taunton a few DAYS ago.
A swell, wishing to make himself in
L..
suppose | was a hundred wears agor'-
Just what YOU are now-nothing at
all, was the prompt reply.
Where do YOU hail from?" aueried a
Yankee OF traveller. Where do Won
rain irom?' Don't rain at all, said
the astonished jonathan. Neither do
| hail: so mind Your own business.
An eastern paper in a fit OF reyolu-
tionary enthusiasm says: '.Hurrah for
the girls of 70 - "'Thunderr' cries .
New Jersey paper. 8 That's too old,
No, no. Hurray Tor the girls of l7.'
A lady teacher was endeavoring to
impress upon her pupils the terrible Ell
feet of the punishment of Nebuchadnez-
zaf, saving. seven years he ate grass
like cow" When a boy asked. s.Did
he give milk"
\ story is told of a diminutive youuy
fellow who proposed to Young buxom
dam,el. 20, no. she said IL can't
| think of it for "A moment. The fact is
Mr. your little too big to put in a
cradle, and a lite too small to nut in
bed!"
A Yankee in Texas, whe sat listening
to the stories OF a Louisianian in regard
to the marvellous growth of sugarcape
on his plantation, near New Orleans,
finally said, 'that amt nothing, Pve
seen cane in old New England more'n
! mile iongt' "What kind of cane was
II! was the general inquiry. "A hnr-
ricane!" answered the triumphant Yam
kee.
Mrs. ST. Clair in her lecture on the
'Mormons at Home, delivered last week
in st Joseph, Mo-, endeavored to excite
the sympathy OF her audience in behalf
of Brigham Young. She said. Sup
pose gentlemen, you were set down in
the middle OF twenty wives, all depend
Tag on YOU iOr support, what would you
do? There was silence for moment,
and then young fellow rosred out, i
would do the best could