Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1871-05-25

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his murderers Macon Union.
\ countryman in u short discourse on
love, says: 1t does pear ike the girls
90 hall way, but IT pears like team OF
oxen couIdn draw EN- t'other halt"
y certain school teacher is accused of
Into oAicatlon, because he read from the
Bible: Aud the cock wept thrice, and
ieter went cut and crew bitterly"
Only one Vcrsaillist was wounded in
recent attack near Paris, whereupon
joker remarks that he must bave been
\ Connecticut school-boy has written
q COMPOSITION on The horse, III which he
says 1t Is An animal having lour legs,
''uue at each corner.
Au Ottawa, III. undertaken adyertises
that he Keeps on hand "a, elegant > ocA
ut neat and nopbv surUud-, warranted
10 give satisfaction to the most pArtIcu-
lar.
The iitiabIe plea OF the defendant il
breach oi promise case iii low. is That
hc was IN earnest aOOut inarrs Iux the
ssrI anal he got tha, rheumatism
A lady was urged by her friends "
mar! "a "idoWeT, aud a. an argument
thct -pohc vi ms Two beautiful cAIi,treu.
'ChhdIcn, rcphcd the lady, are he
100 'h-picAs-a person wants ncr own.
y precocious Lenox TOUR, ear-sld
thus comineuts, rat .cr Sharply, upon
the iaternal weakness MY papa dit
dunk all the time, when he can't dit
duuA ON cider, he does Oh pep mint
\ young Hnosier once said to Hoo
>iercss: sal, II there any body court
IN you now Aud Sal replied: We'll,
sam, there Is one teller sorter courtiu'
and sortcr not, but | reckon, is more
serter not than sorter.'
Mary had little lamb, with hair a-
fine silk; The longer Mary lived,
the more She found Tat lamb a blk.
For ali the hair WAS oDly flax, On that
ueceltIul brute; but Mary hadn't much
to say, Tor hers was only jute
The Joint High Commission. A
useful body would be the Joint High
Cohlmission, whose duty it should be
10 Visit cheap eating houses during the
season, and II joints were High 10 CON
uemn them.-Panch.
The following epistle was lately seen
II the window oiaLondou coffee house:
stolen, from this window, "a China cup
and saucer; the set being now incoua-
plete, the thiet may have the remainder
AL u bargain
An Intelligent rcpartee is attributed
10 the nenber from Mormondom "A the
new Congress. A brother member ask
ed him bow many wives he had.
Enough 10 keep me from running after
other peoples, he replied.
A 500, 900 fire occurred in Grand Rap
ids, Michigan, on Tuesday night, and
S2OO,UUO worth OF property was burned
III New bern, n. c., on the same night.
The entire business portion OF Walcott,
Niagara county, NY, was destroyed by
lire "Wednesday night.
FnIAL LPIETY.-F'irst collier loquitur-
There's been a toire (explosion) at
Jackson's pills! Secoud collier-Moy
ieyther worked theere. First collier
o. and he's blowed a to pieces Second
colier-Boy gum? whoy, he's got moy
pocket KNIFE wi i'm!
There are reports that negotiations are
going on for the lease OF the Northern
Railroad to the Vermont Central Rail-
road, in order to secure another link in
the contemplated grand trunk route
from Chicago to Boston by way OF the
lakes, OgdeIsburg, St.Albans, White
River junction and Concord.
Eleven japanese merchants have ar
rived at San Francisco win l3O, 900 cards
OF silk worms eggs, costing i'll Japan
3675,OOO. They were contracted for BY
a French house, but the order was can
celled IN consequence oi the war. Jap
anese merchants then chartered the Gu
acho, and shipped the entire lot for Sam
Francisco.
A ODrORs PRESCRIPTION An Irish
man made u sudden bolt into druggist
shop, took from his pocket soda water
bottle, flied 10 the briln with some pure
| liquor, and handing il across the counter,
| exclaimed: There doctor, snuff that,
| will youp The doctor did AZ he was di-
recied. aud pronounced the liquor to be
xemnine whiskey. Thank you, doctsr,'
said the lrishman. Hand it to me a.
gain, if you please The doctor again
did rs directed, and asked what he meant.
Och, thin,' said Pat, If you will have it
the priest tOld me not to drink any Of
this unless got it from the doctor. 81
here's your nsalth and ths priests
health