Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1871-10-06
MY OLD UMBRELLA.


tiness of my appearance before L was
married; and if there was one particu-
lar thing which / liked to have stylish,
it was my umbrella. The best silk and
the finest frames were hardly good
enough, and my umbrella was generally
about as slim and nicely shaped as a
cane: so much so that Brown used to
chaff me continually about its appear
ance, and say it was a bachelors um
brella-his being almost the size of Mrs.
Camps.
1t was three years ago this month,
and the weather was evidently in a very
sorrowful mood, for it just poured all
day long. something like cats and dogs
which auntie always uses as simlle
when it rains very hard. | had to leave
the office number of times during the
day, and about 2 o'clock went to the
bank to get check cashed, and of
course my umbrella, not this one, was
in constant use. There were some
dozen persons waiting on a line at the
counter, and had to wait also. Wait
ing there in a damp room wasn't very
agreeable; but l just hung my UNI
Lrella on the edge of the counter un-
til | had done, and just there | lost it,
for when l got the cash had forgotten
the umbrella, and left the bank with
out it.
When I reached the street | missed
it, and back l posted, but it was gone
where, by whom taken or how [ never
found out, but hanging on the counter
instead was an old dilapidated looking
thing, made of blue cotton. 1t was
enough to make me shower left-handed
blessings on the party who had made
the exchange but here, by the way, |
might Just as well observe that it was
really a blessing to me, only in dis
guise.
AS the rain poured in torrents, I just
made the best of the matter, and
stalked into the street as apparently
unconcerned as possible, me, the natty
Thornton, as my chums called me,
perambulating those streets where my
under a big cotton umbrella, large
enough to shelter whole family OF
seven.
Brown met me first.
"Ah !" said he, "got family now
congratulate you, my boy ~
And from him to the Office, each and
everv friend | had seemed to be in the
street waiting to hail my appearance
with a Jest or laugh. Confound it
was almost mad enough to snias..l the
old thing to pieces; but | didn't, for
it rained too hard for any such foolish
ness.
Several times during that afternoon
7 yainlv ,endeavored to borrow or steal
another one but it was of no use
and for home | started with it, getting
into the same omnibus as Brown,
who at once commenced at me with
81 say, old fellow, when did it take
place ?"
Thinking innocence might extricate
me from this confounded chatting,
asked, What take place p
"Why, your becoming a married
Benedict"
"Well, you are mistaken, for | still
remain nv own master and am not
compelled to be at home every night al
ten. or else suffer the discordant din ot
a scolding partner"
This was intended for him, but he
shook it off easily, and gave it back
with vengeance.
ayes, but being as you are, you are
nightly put out about carrying an UNI
brella more serviceable than ornamen
tai; whereas, I, being married, satisfy
myself with what | have. To be g
philosopher you must get married, and
who knows but what that same umbrella
NAV come into service then?'
| escaped from him then, as l had
| reached the street I wanted to get out
at; and, leaving the omnibus, | ele-
| waited the umbrella to protect me from
the pouring rain. At the corner, under
a shop awning, stood two lovely
| damsels, evidently waiting for the rain
| to cease, for they were without um-
brellas.
Over-sensitive in regard to my appear
ance, / could not help noticing the
litter as they regarded me. And,' to
tell the truth, there was somewhat of a
contrast to laugh at. Imagine fash
ionablv-dressed young man, rather good
looking. decidedly genteel, and over his
head an enormous old cotton umbrella,
and you'll see me as those girls saw me
then.
was nettled, put out and wrathful
but resolved to check their mlrth at all
hazards. Stepping up to them, said
Ladies, my umbrella is large, and as
see you are without one, can offer you
my services as far as | go?'' mentally
resolving that if they went further than
me my umbrella should go too.
After whispering for a moment, one
of them replied: "Thank you, sir we
would be obliged for your escort"
OF course, as we went along I did my