The Portland daily press., 1871-04-15
IS What's the Matter with thar NosaI

Snyder kept beer saloon some wears ago
over NIT der Grindstone Factory in Ken
singtown. Snyder was ponderous Teuton
Dt very iraslbe temper-"sudden and quick in
Euarrer-eetting mad in minute Never
1heless his saloon was great resort for The
Doys, partly because Of the excellence OF his
beer, aud partly because the boys liked to
chaie "old Snyder" as they called him; for
although his bark was terrific, experience had
taught them that he wouldn't bite.
One day Snyder was missing, and 1t was
explained by his ''frau" " no "jerked the beer
that day, "that he had gone out fishing NIT
der poys" The next day one of the boys
who was particularly fond OF roasting" old
Spyder, dropped in to get glass of beer. and
discovered Snyders nose, which was big
one at any tune, but which was swollen and
blistered by the sun, until it looked like dead
ripe tomato.
why, Snyder,what's the matter with your
nose?" said the caller.
81 peen out fishidg nit der poys.n replied
SNYDER, laying his finger tenderly against his
proboscis. "The sun it pees hot like ash ter
tliei, and l purns my nose. Nice nose, don't
t?" And Snyder viewed it with a look OF
com,cal sadness, in the little mirror back of
the bar.
1t entering at once into the mischievous
fellow IN front of the bar to play trick upon
Snyder, he went out and called a half dozen
of his comrades, with whom be arranged that
they should drop in at the saloon, one after
another, and ask Snyder, "What's the matter
with that nose ?' to see how long be would
stand it. The man who put up the job went
in with companion; seating themselves at
the table they called Tor beer. Snyder brought
it to them, and the new conner exclaimed, as
soon as he saw him
Why, Snyder, what's the matter with your
nose ?"
81 yrst tell your friend, 1 neen out fishing
init deI poys, unit the sun he burnt 'em-tws
lager-den cents, all right"
Another of the boys came rushing in, ex-
claiming
"Hallo, boys; you're ahead of me this time
'spose Pm in, though. Here, Snyder, bring
me glass OF lager and a pret-(here be ap.
peared to catch sudden glimpse of Snyder's
nose, looking moment, and then bursting
out laughing
"Ha! ha! Why, Snyder, what-ha! ha
what's the matter with that nose?"
Snyder, of course, couldn't see any fun in
having it laughed at, and he says, in tone
sternly emphatic
"Pve peen out fishing NIT der poys on der
Schoolikil. The sun pese hot like ash hail
unit puant my pugle. Now, das ish more
yot don't got to say. Vot gind of peseness
Dat ish all right; purnt mine nose, don't
it?"
burn your nOSe-Durn all the hair Off VOul
head, for what care; you needn't get mac
about it,"
1t was evident Snyder wouldn't stant
more than one tweak at that nose, for he wa.
trampiLg around behind the bar and growing
around like an exasperated old bear in his
cage.
Another of his tormentors walked in.-
Some one sings out to him, "Have glass ol
beer, Billy?
Don't cafe about any beer" says Billy
"but you may give me one of your best cigars
-ha! ha! ba! ha! hoI ho! he ! he ah! h-h
ha! ha! ha! why-ha! ha ha why, Snyder
VINO wha-ha-a! ha! ha!-what's the matter
with that nose?"
Snyder was absolutely fearful TO behold by
this time. His face was purple with rage, al
except his nose, which glowed like ball O
fire. Leaning his ponderous figure far ovel
the bar, and raising bis arm aOft to empha
size his words with il, he fairly roared-
"lve peen ont fishing NIT Ter poys The
sun it pese hot like INFLAMMATION, purn1
my nose. Now, you no like dose nose, you
yust take dat nose unit wr wr-wring our tam
American fingers NIT 'em! That's the kind
OF man vot ami"