Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1871-03-11
Josh Billings Papers.
REMNANTS.

Customs are like grease-they make
emmy thing slip easy.
There is sum things that kant be
countcriittcd "a blush is one ov
them.
Goodness IL jist az mulch of stud
dy az mathumatick' IT,
lfa man cxpekts tew be very vir-
tewOus he mustn't mix too Iiutch with
the world, nor too mutch with himself
neither
There IL more deviltry in the world
than there IL ignorance.
People who acktually deserve tew
liv their lives over agin are the very
ones who don't want to do it.
The richest man ov all IL he who
haz got but little, but haz got all he
wants.
Natur makes all the noblemen--
wealth, edukaShun, nor pedigree,
never made one yet.
When q man duz nc a favour | al
wus try tew remember it, and when
be duz NE an injury, | alwus try tew
forget tiff don't ought to.
lfa man IL honest he may not alwus
be in the right, but he kan never be in
the wroGg.
Crate takers are generally CRATE
liars, for them who talk so much must
sooner or later run out ov the truth,
and tell what they don't kno.
| don't believe thare IL emmy sich
thing az a perfcktly good man, or II
perfektly bad man.
l kno ov emmy quantity ov people
whose VirtLws are at the mercy ov
other folks, who are good simply for
the reputashun Ov it, who haven't got
emmy more real appetite tew their
conscience than a klam haz.
have studdyed mi own karakter,
and mi own impulses for 80 years
clussly, and kant tell to-day Ito save
a bet) whether | am an honest and
trew man or not--if thare IL emmy
body who knows about this matter
wish they would address me a letter,
enclosing me postage blister.
There IL no sekts, nor religious dis
putes amung the heathen; they all ov
them cook a missionary the same way.
Thare IL lots ov folks who expekt
tew eskape hell jist bekause the crowd
IL so CRATE that are going there.
Every man makes biz own pedigree,
and the best pedigree IL clear con-
science.
To be a gentleman-git ritch and
keep boss and buggy.
Virtew in poor mar is looked up
OH as a jewel in tud'S nose.
The man who IL tyrant in hiz
household IL an abject cuss among
his equals.
After a man IL fairly born the next
crate blessing liz square deth.
ViFtew IL like strength, no man can
tell how mutch he has got wit till he
Gums akrost sumthing he kant lift.
/ have cum tew the konklusion that
what every boldly praizcs wants cluss
watching.
Thare is nothing the wurld viii pay
so mutch for az fust rate nonsense, and
there IL nothing in the market so
skase.
Thare IL menny folks who are like
mules, the only way to their afteck-
shuns is through the kindness of a
klub.
Tharc aint but phew people who
know how to Civ gifts, and the num- |
Ter who know how TO receive them IL
less.
The strongest propensity in woman's
nature IL to want to know "'chapS !
goiRg on" and the next strongest IL
tew boss the job.
Skorn not the day ov little things,
for thare IL no man in this world so !
CRATE but what sum one kan do him a
favor,.or an injury.
Thare IL one witness that never IL
guilty ov perjury, and that IL con
science.
Thare IL sich o thing as beiag tew |
uuick--i am 0v that kind miselfAi al
wus miss ra!o rode train by being |
tharc haf an our too soon.