Wyandot County Republican. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1869-1903, 1871-03-16
CURRENT ITEMS.
THE best thing to take before breal

IHE best thing to take before breakfast
Another nap.l
Iris somewhat curious fact that COM
positor takes most e's when hardest at
work.
JOSH BILLINGS says: " 1t strains mans
philosophy the wust kind to- latf when he
gets beat"
THE Charter of the Washington Life Sc
cures all the profits to the insured. More
than this cannot be done.
A DRUNKEN man was recently drowned
in gutter in Syracuse. The water was
but six inches deep, and he was frozen
fast.
THE assets of the Mutual Life of Chi
cago, are of the most solid character
cash, government securities, real estate Sc
curities.
The prudent President of a Boston
bank has earned paragraphic immortality
by carefully turning up the bottom of his
vest while at his desk, to keep it from
wearing out.
IT is said that Mr. Greeley is so addict
ed to agriculture that whenever he is
asked question he invariably says ebay"
before he answers to any great extent.
"a MAN who'd maliciously set fire to a
barn." said good old Elder Poyson, and
burn up stable full of horses and COWS,
ought to be kicked to death by jackass,
and I'd like to be the one to do it"
AN ambitious citizen of Rome, Ga, en-
deavored to eat three quarts of oysters re-
Gently. A local paper says: at was a
way he had of signing an engagement to
slumber in the valley"
"Have you Blasted Hopes?' asked
lady of green librarian, whose face was
much swollen by a toothache. "No,
ma'am," he replied, but have blasted
toothache."
A NEW signal light for railway trains
has been invented. 1t consists of lantern
which revolves when the train is in motion,
displaying red light if going forward,
and green light if backing.
A NoRRIDGEwoCK (Me.) deacon recent
ly coughed up head of herds-grass
which had lain on his lungs for over thir-
ty-six years. 1t still retained it's original
shape, but had grown as hard as stone.
THE London Saturday Reuiep antici-
pates legislation on children's parties, on
the ground that "if it is injurious to the
health of boy to send him up chimney,
it is obviously equally so to expose him
to the consequences of late hours and hot
rooms"
A SMALL boy in New York arranged a
bridge of bricks at muddy crossing, and
then, after passengers had availed them
selves OF the dry crossing, civilly request
ed "a penny for his walk" which was al
most invariably given him. That boy may
yet own railway.
A LITTLE negro boy at the South has
just been equipped with a new suit of
clcthes-the first he ever had on in his
Life. Next morning he appeared with one
leg OF his trowsers ripped up from shoe to
walstband. On being asked how it hap
pened, he answered: "Please, ma'am, 1
wanted to hear it fop"
THE following certificate was lately pre-
sented to the st. Louis Historical Society ::
y! earthly that gave permission to Benia-
min Gardner to satel on pies of vacant
land cold Little Purrary, on the Missury.
some time in December, 1902. Given
under my hand this 23d Day of Febury,
1906. Daniel Boone"
A MAN living in Columbia, Pa, ard own
ing the house he lives in, lately refused
to bury his father, who died suddenly.
but turned the body over to the Coroner
to be buried as pauper, signing his name
to paper which read: "I hereby refuse
to take charge of the corpse of my father
or pay for its burial"
SOME little girls in Salem, Mass. held
a fair on Washington's birthday for the
benefit of one of the pupils in their Sun
day School, a sick little girl, daughter of a
dead soldier. They obtained $12O, and it
is uncertain which was the happiest, they
who gave or she who received the amount.
JOHN CAMP and his wife, who lived in
Grant County, Wisconsin, determined to
emigrate, and, having no conveyance, set
out for Sioux City on foot. They left
Grant County on the first day of Feb
ruary, and reached Sioux City on the even.
ing of February 25, having walked 45C
miles, and suffered greatly from weariness
cold and hunger.
THE Bible of the Phillips family, buried
with Mrs Phillips at North Easton, Mass.
was lately taken from her grave to settle
by its genealogical record, the question ot
helrship to large deposit made by mar
named Phillips in New York bank more
than sixty years ago. The letters were SC
far erased, however, as to be illegible
and the book was returned to its dust.
THE Warsaw Neso Yorker tells little
story at its own expense. Recently it ad
vertised for copy of its own issue of July
z, to complete file, and an appreciative
lady who had carefully preserved hel
papers, reminded the publisher that he
had patriotic or lazy spasm that week
and skipped one issue because of the 4tt
of July, circumstance which had entirely
escaped his memory.
I'VE been thinking" said Little
Froby, "about this here woman suffrage
business. S'posing," said he, "that-a-
now-Oive Logan, fr instance, should be
made President of this great and glorious
and ali that she'd be President Lonan %
wouldn't she?" We bowed "Well, now
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