Wyandot County Republican. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1869-1903, 1871-06-08
CURRENT ITEMS.
COOP LITTLE BUoYs-Corks.
Eannrr>-., rpr,r r,ne Do,,ly o1arl-

In the height of prosperity prepare for
adversely by insuring in the Mutual Life
of Chicago
FORESIGHT is the right eye of Provi-
dence, and Providence dictates Life In
surance. Insure in the Washington.
A CHAMBERMAID advertises in the New
York Times for a situation in first
class family" and adds: None but first
class families need apply"
A MAN has succeeded in cheating
Niagara Falls cabman, and there is talk of
erecting monument in admiration of his
genius and courage.
A SINGULAR case has come up in Lon
don court. A solicitor, one Mr.. Leopold
Lewis, was elected from theatre for
requesting a mumbling actor to speak
up" and now brings suit against the
management for damages.
THE girls of town in Oswego County,
N. Y, have formally declared that they
will not accept the company of any young
man who uses tobacco in any form, unless
the night is very dark and the road muddy,
for the space of sixty days from date.
JAMES I. FIELDS says, in the atlantic
Monthly, that on the first night of Charles
Dickens arrival in Boston, in 1912, he
took run about town and pulled bell
handles with such vigor that one actual
ly came off in his hand"
In reference to the item that writing
desk of Benjamin Franklin was lately
sold in Newport for ten cents, the Mercury
says: "This hoax has had its run. The
desk referred to has been in the Mercury
office many years, and was formerly used
in Judge Joslin's school, and Benjamin
Franklin never used it or saw it. We had
no further use for it, and it was sold at
auction for all it was worth. 1t is now
used for peanut stand"
A BosToN surgeon has lately removed
from a Lawrence mans neck ragged
piece of the blade of dirk, which he has
carried there ever since Thanksgiving eve,
1860. 1t was left there in fight in which
he became engaged in saloon at that
time, and as it projected inside the jaw
bone, has been quite an annoyance to him.
Four separate attempts to remove it here
tofore have failed, and it has now been
taken out through the orifice of the ear
"WHo dare spit tobacco juice on the
floor of this carr" savagely exclaimed a
large and powerfully built passenger, as he
rose from his seat and stalked down the
aisle, frowning defiantly upon the other
passengers. Il dare!" said burly look
ing fellow, as he deliberately squirted a
quantity of the noxious saliva upon the
floor of the aisle. "All right, my friend,
said the first speaker, slapping the other
in friendly manner upon the shoulder,
"give us chew of tobacco"
THE great telegraphic feat of direct
communication between England and In.
dia, without any retransmission, has just
| been accomplished. For the first time
such communication was established by
| the transmission of a message from Kurra.
chee TO London, which was really the first
message from India to England instanta
neously. Subsequentlym communication
was opened to Bombay. London and
Bombay interchanged signals perfectly
and commercial message was sent from
London to Bombay direct and answered
instantaneously. The distance by the Indo
European line is 5000 miles, and this is
the greatest telegraphic feat on record.
GETTING EvEN.-A farmer cut down 8
true which stood so near the boundary
| line of his farm that it was doubted
whether it belonged to him or his neigh.
Dor. The neighbOr, however, claimed the
tree and prosecuted for damages the mar
who cut it. The case was sent from court
to court. Time was wasted, temper soured
and friendship lost; but the case wa;
| finally gained by the prosecution. The
last we heard of the transaction was thai
the man who gained the cause went to the
| lawyers Office to execute a deed of his
whole farm which he had been compelled
to sell to pay his costs! Then, houseles;
and homeless, he thrust his hands into hi
pockets and triumphantly exclaimed
I've beat bim!"
A VIRGINIA lady returned home rather
late, one evening recently, after shor
absence, and, hearing noise in the room
which she and her husband occupied
looked through the keyhole and saw the
rotund figure of woman upon Whose
shoulders her lord was adjusting shawl
Enraged by jealousy she seized sho
gun and, forcing open the door, shot tn,
Obtruder in the back. Her husband
screamed and she tainted, but when com
ing to her senses found that she ha(
desperately wounded dummy which he
husband, a dry goods merchant, haC
brought home for repairs.
THE meanest man has got back to New
Hampshire once more. He is physician
and is man of wealth. Some time since b,
was called to visit his mother professional
ly, an old lady of nearly four score year.
and ten, and he charged her the usual fees
To obtain the money she laboriously
knitted socks, and when she had earned
the amount he took it. Finally, the olC
lady died, and she was buried by anothe
son, man of limited means but gener
Gus disposition, and eager to discharg
his duty to her. With him she haC
lived for fifteen years, and among tn
bills presented to him for funeral ex
penses was one from his brother, tn,
physician, "for use of horse in convey
ing self and wife to grave, So" Ant
the horse was his own at thatI
How TO MAKE LOVE "A faint -heartet
love Ounce writes to literary paper ak
ing how he shall go to work to win tn
affections of woman. He is advised a
follows: ATTEND Sapsoul Don't tall
about going to work to win the affection
of woman; it can't be done in that way
: The more you go to work the more sh
won't like you Push her into ducl
pond and pull her out by the hair. If yo
are afraid to do this, jump in yourself an
let her pull you out. Lend her money, o
borrow some from her. Make her believ
/ that she has deeply wronged you, and the
f forgive her. Deeply wrong her and don
ask to be forgiven. In short, contriv
either to lay her under lasting obligatio
, to you, or lay yourself under lasting OF
LEGATION to her. 1t does not make the di
, ference of headless pin which, so far q
, concerns the result"
A YOUNG husband in Baltimore is in
nice pickle from some cause he conclude
his wife did not love him as she shoulC
and he determined to test that elemen
Therefore, he wrote note telling her h
, was going to drown himself in the ''ragin
: canawl"-and that before she read the COZ
tents of that note his spirit would /
lowering over her, observing how she too
his death. The would-be suicide intruste
the note to small boy, but the boy mi
| took the direction and carried the note t
7 next door neighbor of his wife. NJ
liking to communicate the dreadful il
r telligence to the unlucky woman, the lad
handed the note to an officer, with instru
! tions, if possible, to prevent the rash &C
The officer hurried off, and sure enoug
, found the man on the bank of the cana
Rushing up, the officer seized the unluck
7 husband. and marched him off to til
station house, Notwithstanding his prote
: tations that it was all joke, and that /
: die not intend to commit suicide ct