Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1871-04-06

A Western settler-the sun at evenir

A Western settler-the sun at evening
1t is beauty's privilege to kill time, and
times privilege to kill beauty.
The ladies give as reason for marry
ing for money that they now seldom find
anything else in man worth having.
A Wisconsin gentleman sat down on q
beehive the other day, and prefers now to
stand.
Some one speaking, as if by authority.
says that the women of Detroit have feet
like raisin boxes, and are ashamed to buy
shoes at home, ordering them usually from
the prairies of the West, where leather is
cheap and where there is plenty of room
to manufacture them.
A tradesman who failed in the city OF
Bangor, wrote on his front door, "Psy-
ment suspended for thirty days" A
neighbor reading this, said: You have
not dated this notice." NO." said he, II
don't intend to do SO. 1t would run out if
I did!7
A Datchmsn met an Irishman on a
lonely highway. As they met each
smiled, thinking he knew the other.
Pat, on seeing bis mistake, remarked with
look of disappointment
sFaith an thought it was you, an
you thought it was me, an it's naythur of
as" --
"Yaw, dat is dhru. I am anuder man,
and you is not yourself; we pc both other
podies."
A Justices jury of six recently tried
man for assault and battery, in Crawford
county, Indiana, and their first vote as to
the verdict was as follows: Juror No.
voted "No cose of action :" No 2 voted
"5alt and battery, Second Decree" No.
3 deemed the prisoner "Guilty of salt :"
No. decided there was mo action of
caus;" No. voted it assault and Bs-
tory" while No. 6 decided the prisoner
"Gilty of an sault only"
A clerk in a Wabash Avenue dry
goods house recently assured a lady, to
whom be was epdeavoring to sell a set of
furs, that they were the best furs that
ever grew on fur's back
Spring styles are now omnipresent.
Among the most popular and stylish
dresses worn in the cities il the
" divorce suit" Another style much
in use is the libel suit" We know Of
one poor fellow who had only one suit of
clothes at the beginning of the yesr, but
now has eight suits-some of them are fer
libel.
The following is a Rentleman's diary
of his wife's temper: Monday-thick fog,
no seeing through 1t. Tuesday-gloomy
md very chilly, unreasonable weather.
- frosty, at times sharp.
bitter cold in the morning;
red sunset with fving clouds, portending
hard weather. Friday = storm in the
morning with peals of thunder; air clear
shine, with partial tbsw; frost again at
night. Sunday light southwester in
he morning, calm and pleasant st=dinner
lime, hurricane and earthquake at night.
"There are some things which will
never be hurt by falling" growled an old
nan in market the other morning.
What's themY" inquired marketman.
Prices" said the old man; s'they're 20
awful slow in falling that they'll never
get smashed"
A Western critic, wishing to say the
handsome thing abont Madame Parepa-
Ross, called that eminent vocalist ga
vashtub full Of melody.
The New York World says: "It is un.
ortunste for New York that the author
Il the 'Heathen Ohinee' was not up to
Oexter's time in Chicago, as in that event
Mr.. Bonner probably would have bought
lin.
George" asked the teacher of a school
lass "who above all others sh.ll you
Vish to see when you get to heaven 2"
With a face Frightening up with the
the little fellow shouted,
'Gerliah y
A man who had had a great deal of
ronble with his two cons, who were very
Wild, and finally brought up in State
Prison. A neighbor sympatbizing with
i'm short time after their sentence,
net with the response. "Well, yes. it is
ard at this time of life to have both of
ny sons go in that way; but you see,
yhen it comes night. there is some salts
action in knowing where they are"