Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1871-08-10
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS,


Fourth of July, Heaven would deliver
him from the other three quarters Boston
Post
A PRIVATE IN the army recently sent a
letter to his sweetheart, closing with
May heaven cherish you and Keep you
from yours truly, John Smith"
A DIVIDEND is the surplus, the remain
der, the result, the end of a transaction.
divided among the shareholders hence
the word di vide.ends An apothecary
originally carried about his medicine in
Jars-he was a pot carrier-hencet the word
a-pot- carries.
A GENTLEMAN in England who recently
captured whale, and paid friend half
crown to inform him how to preserve it,
was advised to "put the whale carefully
into glass bottle, cover it over with
spirits of wine (strong whisky may do),
then cork and seal up"
THIS is the way New York printer adj
vertises himself: 1.-THE poorest printer in
the world. No attention whatever paid
to orders; prices higher than any other
house in the city; II small business cards
for 81 900 in gold other work in proper
ton. How this world is given to lying
GIACoMo MEYERBEER, some twenty
years ago, was robbed, in Paris, of trunk
containing some new compositions of his.
Despite all the efforts of the secret police,
the trunk was not recovered 1t was re-.
Gently found in the cellar of an old house
in Rouen, and has been restored to Mey-
erbeer's heirs.
SIR WALTER SCOTT, who was a lawyer,
once defended house-breaker at Jed
burgh. After the t. ial the prisoner sent
for him, thanked him for his exertions,
and said he was sorry he could not give
him fee, but he would give him two bits
of advice: First, that yelping terrier in
side of house was better protection
than a big dog outside; and, secondly,
that no lock so bothered housebreaker
as an old rusty one
1T has been ascertained from the Stats
tics of the General Life Insurance Compa-
ny of London, that if 100000 incorporate
persons be taken, from Is to 70 years of
age, and an equal number of correspond
ing ages who are not incorporate, thirty
two Of the former will die as often as ten
of the latter Out Of 100000 of each, 49,
907 of the Incorporate will be dead before
so years of age, but of those who are not
temperate 4,206 only will be dead.
NEIGHBoR Sis blacksmith; he has
little four-year-old S. was at work
at his forge the other day making harrow
teeth, and had about thirty piled up beside
the anvil, when Bob came in, and stood
watching the job. Pa, what's them?'
" Those are harrOw-teeth, sonny" s.
worked away, not noticing the boy until
he heard laugh, when he looked up, and
heard him exclaim to himself, "Ho, ho!
what an awful big mouf!"
GEORGE WHITEFIELD was once preach
ing to a seafaring audience in New York,
when, suddenly assuming nautical air and
manner that were irresistible, he broke in
with, "Well, my boys, we have clear
sky, and are making fine Roadway over a
smooth sea before light breeze, and we
shall soon lose sight of land But what
means this sudden low ring Of the heavens
and that dark cloud arising from beneath
the western horison? Harkl don't you
hear distant thunder? Don't you see those
flashes Of lightning? There is storm
gathering! Every man to his duty! How
the waves rise and dash against the shipl
The air is dark the tempest RACES our
masts are gone THE ship is on her beam
ends What nextg" This appeal instantly
brought the sailors to their feet with a
shout, "The longboat take to the long
boat -
A CINCINNATI dentist, who had become
nervous by frequent burglaries in his vi
cfhity, was somewhat startled recently by
having man come daily at the same hour
each evening ard sit on his doorstep. He
finally suggested that if 1t would be all
the same to him, he would be pleased to
have him divide his attentions, and sit on
some neighbours doorstep for awhile. "But
it wouldn't be the same" shouted the visi-
tor in return, "nor anything like it, You
are dentist, and have an internal aching
tooth that l haven't the courage TO get
pulled. / come here every afternoon try
ing to make up my mind to have it out,
and as soon as l come in sight Of your
house it stops aching, and as long as sit
on your doorstep where the confounded
thing knows it can get pulled If it gives
trouble, have some rest. Now if you
want me to 90 to another dentist will !"
"Oh, no." was the reply, under the cir
cumstances stay by all means, my friend"
WE read, in a German publication, an
extraordinary account Of the explosion of
only ten drops of nitro glycerine, which a
pupil in laboratory had put into small
iron saucepan, and heated with Bunsen
gas fame. The effect of the explosion
was that the for, y-six panes of glass Of the
windows of the laboratory were smashed
to atoms, the saucepan was hurled through
a brick wall, the stout iron stand on which
the vessel had been placed was partly
split, partly spirally twisted, and the tube
of the Bunsen burner was split and flatten-
ed outward Fortunately, none of the
three persons In the laboratory were
hurt. When nitro glycerine is caused to
fall, drop by drop, upon thoroughly red
hot iron plate, it burns off as gunpowder
would do under the same conditions; but
if the iron be not red hot, but yet hot
enough to cause the nitro-glycerine
to boil suddenly, an explosion takes
place.
Mr.. BARRY, in his work on Russia in
1870, tells story of the time when slave
ry was an institution In that country: A
certain ironmaster caused man who had
offended him to be locked up in an iron
cage, and kept him confined in it for
length of time. At last, while he was alb
sent on a journey, the case OF his wretched
prisoner came to the knowledge OF the
Governor of the province. The Governor
caused the man, cage and all, to be brought
to the government town, and invited the