The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1871-02-16

ground for divorce. -
RATHER AMUs1Na-An amusing in
cident occurred few days ago the I'M
mediate Vicinity of the city. The parties
to the affair used their best cndeavors to
have the matter kept secret, but 1t has
accidentally reached our ears, and we
consider it entirely too rich to be lost. We
refrain from mentioning any names, but
give the other particulars as they were
related to us A gentleman residing but
a very short distance from this city had
tasted fine hog. which he intended to
kill few days ago and put up for his
winter store. Wishing to be economical,
he concluded to do the !" butchering"
himself, and, although he had not done
anything of the kind before, he had no
doubt whatever that he could successfully
perform the operation.
On the morning of butcher day every.
thing was got in readiness for the occasion
when the old gentleman and two of his
boys repaired to the hog pen for the
purpose of taking poor piggy's life away.
After several I'm uccessful attempts to
catch the already frightened animal, the
trio began to devise q new plan, and
finally concluded to improve on the old
mode of killing by knocking the hog
down first The next trouble to be got
over was to get chance to strike the
pig on the head. This trouble was
speedily overcome by q suggestion from
the old man that the hog should be
| driven into the yard, from which it was
to be drove through small gate, where
dad" was to be stationed with an ak
and knock bis hogship down as he came
through.
The plan was thought to be good one,
and they at once proceeded to carry it
out. I" Pap" shouldered his ak and
stood Immediately outside OF the gate,
when the boys got in the yard and com
menced to slowly drive the hog down to
the place whereit was to receive the
blow that would send it where the
/" woodbine twineth." AS the animal
neared the pate, the old man began to
prepare himself for action; nearer and
nearer it came, finally reached the gate,
and Just as it got its head through, the
old man hauled off to give it stunning
blow but before his ak came down the pig
had suddenly wheeled around and poor
piggy received fearful thump on the r
ear, which so frightened it that it made .
terrible plunge across the yard, knocking
the pins from under one Of the boys and
upsetting the old woman, who had been
looking on /" just to see the fun" and
making drive through the fence, the
almost frantic animal got on the higt
road and cut /" blue streak" for the
woodland when last seen was disappear
ing in the forest 1t would be needless to
add that they didn't " butcher that day.
st. Joseph Mo, Gazette.
A Kansas paper makes the following
remarks in announcing rev railroad !;
Ring out, We bells, your loud pealing
anthems to the skies. Let the deep-toned
organs pour forth their tbunderous har-
monies Sound the hewg ag,strike the tom
jon, beat the fuzzy -guzzy, wake the gong
kwong, let the loud hosanna ring, bum
tum fizzlc bum, ding go BIN Break forth
into singing, ye little hills. skip for JOY
like junevile muttons or. dimutive will
liam goats, ye everlasting mountains.
Sbeut your glad hallelujahs, ye joyous
children. Burn your whiriigigs and blue
lights, fire your rockets and crackers.
loot your tin trumpets, blow your shrill
whistles and thump your lilliputlan
drums. Let valley and plain, rock, river
and huckleberry patch, meadow, field
and leafess wood, catch up the gladstone
souAd--repeat the hlissful strain: More
railroads are coming to Atchison More
irailroa ds arc coming to Atchison