Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1871-02-03

SKINNER's SILVER WEDDING-The follow
ing narrative will be suggestive to married folks
generally:
1T being just twenty-five years since my first
wife died, I thought could not better celebrate
the event than by having grand silver wedding.
Alas twenty-five brief summers, and it seems
but the day before yesterday since returned
from her funeral, an altered man, and told the
undertaken to call round for his pay in the TALL.
YOU a.e apt to get two or three presents alike;
but f1atter myself that I fixed EN- here. In
the first place, Mrs Skinner and looked over
our stock of silverware to see what we were out
Of and found that we could take about twenty
five square presents without getting bilious and
then we invited few children, in reference to
nut-crackers, butter knives and other small try.
| issued my invitations two weeks beforehand,
to give everybody q chance to buy present, and
in addition limited in delicate manner what |
should like each one to bring. So the invita-
tions read very much like this
Mrs. Charity Phleabottom and Husband
You are both asked
TO Mr. and Mrs Nose Skinner Silver w edding,
January 18th.
*4sPlease bring silver caster, with extra mus
tard jug.
Mrs John BeeZum and Husband,
January 18th.
*x*We cherish fond hopes in your direction in
reference to q silver teapot.
''On the back Of each invitation was neat
gilt scroll, enclosing the words. Please avoid
dollar stores
ITO say the affair was success would be de-
trauding the dictionary have looked that
venerable pamphlet through, but fail to find
word that meets the case Nothing short Of
seven syllables and 4 French roof" will do, so |
give it up
"On the arrival of the guests | took charge
of the presents with as much emotion as the
value of the present called for A silver pie
knife l received with husky tremor in my
voice, while an elegant silver teapot caused me
to entirely break down with emotion But |
recovered and went through the trying ordeal
with unAinching bravery. Those who didn't
bring presents were told that We were not at
home, which, of course, made the gathering
more select. We received some very fine pres
ents. including share in silver mine, lock
of gray hair streaked with silver, some silver
tones from maiden voice, siyery beam
from the moon, and some castor oil made from
L silver castor.
Then my wife and stood up and received
the silver-tongued congratulations of our guests
on our happy married life. But didn't need
EN-; no, should say not When see man
utterly crushed in spirit and bald headed at the
premature age of fifty, with a black eye con-
stantly on hand, and wife who is ready to fur
nish him with more black eyes at the lowest
market price, pause ere congratulate him
on matrimonial bliss Not that would insinu-
ate that Mrs. Skinner is not as gentle as dove
in the olive branch business. Not at all. |
simply say that in case like this should prob
ably pause to the extent of a semicolou and a
comma ere congratulated him. y
CATHEDRAL. OF ST. DENIs.-The reported
burning of the Cathedral of St. Denis will ex-
cite almost as much regret as did the rumor of
the destruction of the Cathedral Of Strasburg.
II had been for over twelve hundred years the
burial place of the French monarchs, and though,
not particularly famous for its architectural
beauty, was held in much the same respect by
Frenchnen that Westminster Abbey is by the
English. Four years ago the sarcophag;l con-
tanning the ashes of the iustrlous dead were
removed from the crypts, thoroughly ceanSed
and renovated and placed on the main hoor OF
the church, where they have been visited by
thousands of tourists who did not care to make
an excursion into the damp vaults beneath,
even to look at the splendidly seulptured re-
ceptacles Of relics so precious. But has the
cathedral been destroyed-o is it only injured y