The Portland daily press., 1871-08-09
POETRY.



.dndroscoggin IS a significant phrase,
Interpreted heIe in divers queer ways
Not writ, return, record is made
Tut -Androscoggin S. is out on barade.
low the LAWYERS and sherfs and clerk of the courts
All know the deep meaning this law phrase mporS'
int the vulgar plebeans they never cou'd guess
Lhe iull force of the words ARdTOscOggm So
-fndroscoggin, indeed, is the balwick's name;
SIS is the stiok er, what meaneth the SAINT
Videlicet say some: SOFT soder, soft soap -
such sneer at the law. some sheer ~ w
Deriding its weightitr matter' lhs'ea' |
7 he mint and the anise and comm VIC
Others wiser assert, with n ore se
Seth Sampson Esouue, is The man VIM rs neant-
Seth Samp son. who sits tween tue oenon anu the
bar.
And baarkers TO catch every lisp OF the law
And feeds on such io1del, tho he never grows fat
Bnt leauer and tanker. more sharp and all that
Till he looks like some G mus judicial let loose
From a case OF old law books grown dingy with use
All picked and dried i'll the essence OF law,
And as tuil OF sharp points as the btiet that Won
draw
With his long gray hair and his unwashed clothes,
And his ponderous specs a-stradi lie Lis nose,
And his cay skin oeSt odd you would laugh
AT Inc ancient volume thus bound in calf
Seth Sampson, they say, is the phantom IS;
LOOK ut Tor his clutches, you rogues who t1ansgress
In the trial OF cases called civil, tits true,
Androscoggin S =. but proc]ams the ''Uenuej"
While in criminal causes, by legal intent,
Both "UeaIe" and the '.poput satus" are meant:
The majesty stern OF The country at large
Stands up and speaks out in the criminal charge;
Making burglars and thieves and as: ass ms and
rakes
Pay the tenalties due their mischiefs mistakes
AndroScoggin IS. is summons OF fear
When it reaches the precincts OF peanuts and beer
Disturbing the hucksters and leaving withal
A margin for profits exceedingly small.
Eliza NJ, NJ. was most grievously poor;
Aadroscoggtn IS. had been round to her door
In the person OF two three bright button chaps,
Whose call was unwecome and BODIED mishaps.
High words had been heard in Eliza's abode;
Some guests had gone forth with too much of load,
And the scent OF "R. g." the button chaps swore,
Told a taie OF the "stewed'' at Elzs's own door.
Now these button chaps holted right into her house.
And Eliza showed fight which raised great touse;-
They looked in the cupboards and smeed of the
cans;
She whaeked big bottle right out of their hams
With blow of the poker and smash ON the floor
Went the "title cold pater she'd kept in her store
They SIN aled OF the tumblers and bottles and jugs
They smelled of the teacups and saucers and mugs,
And they searched for a smell amid storms of abuse.
But never smelled 'acater" at all in the house.
AndroscoggiB IS. called Eliza in court
On charge which both keeping and sale did import
And Eliza arraigned faltered raint in Distress
"Not guilty, yer honor it's a lie of ss"
Are you ready Tor trial, have counsel engaged?"
Said the Judge to Eliza, her grief unassuaged:
NO counsel. ger honor: Pm too poor, sir, 70 pay
Any Iascyer to help me-" Here tainted away
The trembling Eliza, till touched by her grief
The Judge assigned counsel, which brought some re-
lief.
But the jury, despite all the counsel could do
Said: EQUITY ofkeeping and selling it too"
And lhe Judge imposed sentence of hundreds and
cost,
Or Jail for long months, in which profits are lost,-c
A terrible doom for DOR Liza Men,
Convicted, condemned, in persona, IN rem.
But she had a big pocket down deep in her dress;
She went down to its bottom in This her distress
And she brought up wad OF the gleenbacks and
paid
Every cent of the fine and the costs, and she said
Ye talked nell Jor me, larger it grieues me to say
I'm too poor for ger excellent talking to pay;
PUe but fGy cents LETT take that, Sir and ,chen
The button chaps plague me,IH ioant ye again.
Here she sobbed with a sob of more startling dis
tress
Anu she cursed the old cove, AnarOscOggin IS.
In brief, (tor in fact, Pm but writing a brief)
Androscoggn IS. is an arrant old thief:
He plundered Eliza, destitute woman,
And treated her, too, in way most inhuman;
He took all her profits and never said grace;
He left for the lawyer who pleaded her case
But fifty cent scrip, which was meaner than dirt.
Now JOIN with Eliza and boldly assert,
land rise with authorities strong to sustain
The point that make and now mean to maintain,)
That OF all the old hogs that root round in the
street
Androscoggin IS. is the meanest you meet;
For he grabs for the whole with merciless grip,
Leaving scarce Tor the lawyer fifty cent scrip.
Here close in the faith have made out a case:E
Shall hear mon constdt" now flung in my lace?
The jury may judge and a verdict express
have argued my cause, Androscoggin S.,
State Of M1ine, if you please Uersas Liza Mem:
Androscoggin 49, made the grab Sir, in rem.