Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1871-04-06
WIT AND WIsDoM

llllic COOlS IL HUI hllD WIIlR. DQC
merely keeps itopen with his scythe.
1t is the pale passions that are the
fiereest; it is the violence Of the chill
that gives the measure OF thefeyer.
No love from children Is sweeterthan
that which followssevefity;s so from the
Ibitterolive is sweet, soft oilexpressed.
taL He who spends all his time in sports
is like aones who wears nothing but
fringes, and eats nothing but sauces.
1 should not know what to do with
| problems and difficulties tobe mastered.
Goethe. - 4 III
Great efforts from great motives is
| the best definition of a happy life. The
easiest labor is = burthen to him who
has no motives for performing it.
Who sedulously attends, pointedly
asks, calmly speaks, cody answers, and
in possession of some of the best requi-
sites of man.
The harsh, hard world neither. sees,
nor tries to see, mems hearts; but
wherever there IS the opportunity of
evil, supposes that evil exists.
Goodness of heart is mans best treas
lure, his brightest honor, and noblest
Iacauisition. 1t is that raw of the Di-
vinity which fdignifieS humanity.
Ist Herodotus informs us that the an
cient Persians had. a custom of devising
their political schemes when inebriated
and Of executing them when sober.
q A down east editor says that he has
original poetry enough to shingle
meeting house, but he has no meeting
house to shingle.
| A Georgia editor who has Just been
married relates to his paper that the
marriage ceremony was performed in
an elOquently impressive, and capti-
waiting manner, by the minister"
A musician, in giving notice of an
intended concert at Cleveland, Ohio,
announces ga variety of other songs
MAJ be expected, too tedious to mem
tion." adt
A country clergyman says he has
married but one couple in year, and
they paid him nothing, staid to dinner,
as it was a rainy day, and then bor-
rowed his umbrella when they left,
which he has never seen since.
Some one asked Miss Bremen, "What
do you think when so many people
come to see you? ?' II wish that was
thandsomer,u was the honest and wo-
maniike reply of the charming Swed-
ish novelist.
A lazy lad, who did not go to a church
until the congregation were coming
out asked: as it all done?'' "No,"
was the reply. SIT Is all said; but /
think it will be some time before it is
al oohe. zadsJs bE-Ib esq -.
Buss, a kiss; rebus, kiss again; pluri-
bus, to kiss irrespective of sex; sillibus,
Ito kiss the hand instead of the lip;
fblunderbus, to kiss the wrong person;
Omnibus, to kiss all promiseously; ere
bus, to kiss in the dark. huei
There Is no virtue that adds so noble
Ia charm to the finest traits of beauty as
that, which sexerts itself in watching
over the tranquility of an aged parent.
There are no tears that give so noble
lustre to the cheek Of innocence as the
tears of filial sorrow. .i Te8
1t may be Justly said that the pride
that apes humility is the most objee-
|tionable, as in addition to the bad quail
tiles inherent in false unfounded eSti-
mate of seh, it super Ids that ofhypOc-
|sisy-and no combination can be more
odious than that of hypocrisy with
pride.
A mother trying to- get her little
daughter OsleePene night, said "Anna,
why don't YOU TRY togo to Sleeper 81
am trying" she replied. ''But you
haven't shut yeareyes." "Well, can't
help it; um comes unbuttoned."
An autograph collector in Cincinnati
wrote to Martin Farquhar Tupper re-
specting his autograph. By return of
post there came from the Proverbial
J Philosopher an Autograph an autograph
letter, and four photographs the poet,
each taken ina different position.
1t is worthy of remark that the theo-
logical works of the late Albert Barnes
are among the most popular, and best
known religious books in Great Britain.
Quite. recently new editions of his
s1NOtes on, the Book of Psalms and
s.The Apostle Paul'' We're published in
London. $1,000. : -f--
lo "Be solemn" said Mr.. Corwin, elf
you want to succeed The world looks
up to the fing-master and down on the
clown. Itdespises the man who enter
tains it. Be as solemn, therefore, as an
ass. ALI the monuments have been
built to solemn asses"
'1 Victoria, wife of the Brown Prince of
Prussia, is declared to be as economical
as her mother, the Queen of England,
and to be really assisted in her financial
conservation by her husband. The
princely pair are reported to save near
1y a million thalers year out of their
income. --.... .a--l-.,
4 Mamma-What Is baby crying for,
Maggie? Maggie I don't know
Mamma-And what are YoU looking
so Indignant about! Maggie-That
nasty, greedy dogs been and took and
eaten my 'punge cake! Mamma
Why, saw you eating a sponge cake
q few minutes agoi Maggie-oh, that
was baby's. g
A young man from Marion, Ohio,
has turned up in Cleveland with bot
tie Of coffee, which he desires the chem
lists to analyne, claiming that his wife
had mixed poison with the beverage.
His suspicious were aroused one morn
ing at breakfast by two things: first:
the peculiar color OF the coffee; second,
the extreme af5ability of his wife. He
hastily emptied his cup into flask,
and took the first train for the Forest
City, seiizsesih 9 lsae
At Lawrence, Kansas, a few Sundays
ago while n minister WAS holding forth
ina church, a crowd got up a cock fight
in the yard. The people who had con-
gregated In the church went out to put