The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1871-10-26
POttIetOp'S Pipe.

sThat is a pipe, Sarah," said Mr..
POttletOp, severely, ut IS my opin-
ion that no human being on the face
of this extensive globe but yourself
would require the assurance that that
is a pipe. 1t certainly looks like a
pine, it unquestiOnably smells like a
pipe, and it undoubtedly is a pipe"
'But, sir, begging your pardingr ]
didn't know as misses would allow
you to have a pipe" said Sarah, TAX
ing up her brush. ..a-
6She does, Sarah; in fact, it was
she herself who gave it to me yester-
day as birthday present. Before we
were married, was great smoker ;
but Immediately after that happy
event Mrs. p. cut off my tobacco alb
solutely. Yesterday my privileges
were again restored"
''Had she any objeck in it, sir? ?"
"Object! What do you mean by OBJ
iect? / insist upon an instantaneous
elucidatiOn of that suspicious re-
mark ~
Mr.. Pottletop replaced his meer-
chaum on the mantlepiece, folded his
arms, and assumed most indignant
expression of countenance.
"Nothink, sir. Only ladies do
sometimes have objecks with theiI
husbands" returned Sarah innocent.
ly. "Are you sure misses didn't
ask any favor or promise OfyOu, sir ~
Mr.. PottletOp gasped, and turned
pale. Recovering himselfimmediate'
ly, however, he rejOined, in fsini
voice:
"NothIng at all, Sarah. You may
20 about your business, Sarah"
She moved to the door.
nStop a minute, Sarah; l want tC
ask you question. What does your
mistress chiefly do while I am down
town." - ----H .r--E 1924.
"WeIl, sir" answered the house
maid, "misses is always in her room
by herself, and never sees her SIR
With which she went out.
Mr.. POttletop dropped into chair
and put his hand to his head
'I see it all. False Sophranista, yOl
have deceived mew he exclaimed
'tYOur restoration -Of my privilege
was delusiOn, your pipe was snare
Tobacco! yes. You allow me plenty
of it-eigars and cherOOts, tOO-anC
even try to throw snuff in my eyes
But it won't do! No, madame! WheI
I, cOnfiding and deluded victim, yes
terday gave you my promise not 4
come to dinner any day before two
little did I dream there was anything
at the bottom of it! 1 took your pip
and lit it, and smoked it in peace; TO
day, I find 1 was only putting out m.
pipe of happiness forever! However
I shall see. I shall place myself ol
the watch, ard discover all. Bewar
of me, deeeitful femaleI The lam
has become a lion, and will have hi
vengeance " .as .a.B .....
AIr. Pottletop started up clapped hi
hat on, and made his way to tn
street. Was he going down town
| Not a bit of il. hlr. POttletOp meIel
walked to the corner, slipped aroun
it, stole to his back gate, sneaked int
his garden, and hid himself hehin
the gooseberTy-bush. Here he II
manned, horribly cramped, a quartz
of an hour. But his patience was r,
warded. Glancing upward, he behel
pair of long legs dangling over h
roof, endeavOring to clasp the rail
spout. Next the body and head Of
man appeared, who let himself dow
and entered at the window. The
was but one course for Mr.. POttletO
He rose. seized the garden ladde
planted it against the wall, ascend'
it, and likewise entered at the wi
S dow. But the room was empty. I
: ducked under the sofa His NOV
5 ment was just in time, for the do
/ opened, and the stranger with Z
long legs reappeared.
"AIl's safe1' he soliloquised, in
husky, rasping voice, breathi
throughout the apartment a strong +
vor Of rum. al thought the govern
z would never 90. My ears is cork
: with SCOT listening for him down {
chimney. Now for the gOverno
wife,