Smyrna times., 1871-10-18
Choosing Husbands.

|, "c" gu MAJ IcS, why 40 people talk oil
her choice? La ninety-nine cases out of
hundred, has she any choice? Does not the
man (probably the last she would have chosenl
select herr"
very clever correspondent has sent US
letter containing this query and she makes ont
her case ably. She says Z" have been mar
RED many years; the match was considered
very good one, suitable in every respect-ape.
position and fortune. Every one said 7 had
made good choice Why my dear Mr.. Edi
tor, loved my husband when | married him
because he had by unwearied aSsiduitv sue
ceeded IN gaining my affections; hut had choice
been my privilege, | certainly should not have
chosen him. As | look at him in his easy
char, huge dog at his feet, pipe peeping
! out OF one OF the many pockets of his shooting
coat, | can but think how different he is from
what | would have chosen. My first pencbant
was for fashionable clergymen, perfect
Adonnis he was fatterer, and cared little
Tor me, though L have not yet forgotten the
pang OF his desertlon. My next was barris-
ter; young man of immense talent, smooth.
lnsinuatlng manners but he. too, after talking.
walking, dancing and flirting, left me in the
lurch. Either of these would have been nv
cholce had so chosen butmy present hus-
| pand chose me, and therefore | married him
and this, | cannot hell thinking, must be the
way with half the married folks Of my acouain.
tance. There is both sound sense and truth
~ this but is it not better that men should
choose than they should be chosen? And is
not our correspondent probably much happier
with her present husband, shooting-jacket,
| pipe, and dog inclusive, than she would have
been with either the fashionable clergymen or
the clever barrister? Men are proverbay in
constant; and after marriage, when the trouble
aud inconvenience Of children are beginning to
be felt, and when (thc most trying time of ain
the wife begins to neglect her husband for her
children, unless there was originally very
strong attachment on the husbands side. there
Is little chance OF happiness. \ wife affec.
ton, on the contrary, always increases after
marriage; and even il she were Indifferent be-
lore no well disposed woman can help loving
the father of her children. Children. on her
side are a bond of union, and though she NAV
| appear, tor them, to neglect some of those
little attentions which men naturally seem to
expect, 1t Is only because the child is the more
helpless being OF the two, and the true woman
always takes the side OF those who are most
feeble.
| 1T is a strange but melancholy fact. that
when young girls fancy themseivesin love they
are seldom II ever happy, if they marry the
object of their choice. The fact is in most
cases, they find the husband they have chosen
| quite different person an individual from
the imaginary object he had appeared as a
lover. The imagination in most girls is strong
! er than the judgment; and as soon as the first
idea OF love Is awakened in female heart, the
Imagination Is set to work to fancy lover,
and all possible and impossible perfection are
assembled together in the young girls mind,
to endOw the object of her secret idolatry. The
1Irst man whose appearance and manners at
tract girl on her entrance into society is gen
orally invested by her with the halo of those
! H..
lently IN love without the least real knowledge
0i the man she supposes herself in love with
No wonder, then, that il she marrcs is misera-
bic. The object of her love has vanished
never to return and she finds herself chained
for life to a man she detests because she fan
cies she has been deceived in him.
On the other hand the man who, with very
pardOnable vanity, tancied himself loved for
his own merits, and who was perfectly uncOn
SciuuS of the secret decisions of the girl, be-
comes, when he finds her changed after mar
riage, quite indignant at her caprice. The
friends and relations on both sides share in the
same feeling" what would she have ?" they
cry" she married for love, and see the con
sequence"
The consequences are indeed, in such cases
generally sad enough. When the first delusion
ls disspated, and the truth, in all its hard and
stern reality, comes forth from the veil that
ua9 USCu IhlOhu IT, UOln parties Iecl
indignant at the false position in which they
find themselves Mutual recriminations take
place, each accusing the other of deceit and
ingratitude; while the apparent injustice of
these accusations, which is felt by each party
alternately, first wounds the feelings, and then, |
if repeated, rankleS in the wound till it be,
comes incurable.-Smday Times.
The LINCOLN MONUMENT AT PHILADEL-
PHIA.-The new monument just erected to the
memory Of President Lincoln in Paramount
Park, Philadelph is truly handsome affair
The figure of the murdered President is of
bronze, moulded in Rome by Randolph Rogers,
and cast in the worldrenowned foundries of
Munich, Bavaria. The President is represent
ed sitting in cushioned chair facing toward
the south. In the right hand is quill pen,
ard in the left is scroll, representing the
Ema ancipation proclamation. The face is an
excellent likeness, and the posture is easy and
natural. The figure is colossal in size, and
measures in the sitting posture nine feet six
inches high, and if represented standing in
these proportions, would be nearly eleven feet
in height.
Saratoga girls are organizing an anti kissing