The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1871-05-20
A Festive account of a Mule
Ride in Florida.

Ride in Florida.
We have had hearty laugh, says the
Pine Bluff Press, over the following ar
ticle of an epistolary nature, written by a
New Yorker sojourning in Fernandina
Florida. 1t is decidedly rich:
Well, I'm down here in Florida a5erco-
toting through the SANDAL sand-much
OF it as white as snow. A very quiet
| State is Florida. No hustle. No con.
fusion. Nobody in hurry. To morrow
is as good as to-day to do anything, and
better Time is of no account. The
climate is glorious. Just one beautiful
day after another till you fail to appreci-
ate them.
The boys insisted that l needed relaxa-
ton. My health required it. L had a
pretty fair article Of health, / thought :;
enough to last me as long as | lived
But must accumulate stock for future
use. The South was the place to get it.
And riding was healthy. The sand is
too deep to ride, except on horse back, so
| thought would take ride. i applied
to the livery man for horse. He had
one. He looked sorrowfuly at me, as
though he pilied me. Did l ever ride a
mule | never had. He had as good
riding horses as were ever saddled, but if
l wanted Crock me to Sleep, Mother"
style of a ride, l should take mule. |
don't consider myself first>class judge of
mules. | had some vague notions in re-
gard to them supposed they would do a
large amount Of work with very little
feed, and were immortal. l had read OF
one being driven over the same route by
The same boy for eightv-seven years, and
he was a young mule yet.
Bring forth the mule. He was brought.
He was meek-Iooking cuss--a perfect
"Uriah Heap of mule so far as hum
bleness was concerned. AT least that
was the view took Of him. He was
saddled and mounted. For mile or two
he paced beautifully. l thought those old
monks | had read about knew what they
were doing when they travelled on mules.
l had high respect for their judgment.
just then my mule began to show symp-
toms-symptoms OF what did not know.
found out. Dropping his head between
his legs. his heels described a parabolic
curve, or a diabolic curve, or some other
internal curve, in the air, and ] got off
and sat down upon the ground. | got off
over his head, and did it quick. I'm
not SO old but l can get Oft an animal
of that kind as quick as boy. Then
looked at the mule to see if he was hur..
He didn't appear to be. Then l in
quired around to see how | was. |
an abrasion on the left hip, and
a confusion on the lower end of my back.
Then thought would pronounce a left
handed blessing on that mule, and on his
and fore-mothers before him,
and on his children after him. But |
didn't. l wondered if he would stand
fire. If | had had pistol would have
put the muzzle TO his ear and tried him
Not that | was afraid of him, but | was
afraid somebody might take ride on him
some day and get hurt Bot had no
pistol, so that benevolent and sanguinary
idea was frustrated. Then | got up and
shook the dust off my feet, and brushed
The sand off my trousers, as testimony
against that place. Then l led the mule
carefully home, and stated my case to the
livery man. But when l told him that
be should send for doctor, or Samari-
tan, to do me up in rags, and pour olive
oil and champagne OF my multitudinous
bruises, he only laughed. And his man
that he had to help him laid down on a
bench and laughed-then he rolled off the
bench and -laughed-and stood holding
The mule-then laughed. 1t was redic-
1lous. But I've learned little wisdom.
Next time ride on horseback it will be
a different kind of beast from bogus
ackass. |