The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1871-03-22

blind.
An act to Incorporate the Con-
tinental Telegraph, Company.
How He Came to be Married.
1t may be funny, but I've done
ii. I've got a rib and a baby
Shadows departed-oyster stews:
brandy cocktails. cigar boxes,
boot;:jacks, absconding shirt.but-
tons, whist and demijohn. Shad-
ows present hoop-skirts, band
boxes, ribbons, garters, long stock
ingS, juvenile dresses, tin trum-
pets, little willow chairs, cradles,
bibs, sugar. teats, paregoric, hive
Syrup,rhubarb, SIENNA, salts,squilils,
and doctors bills. Ill just tell
YOU how l got caught. l was al
ways the darndcst, most teac
tard, bashful fellow you ever did
see it was kinder in my line to
be taken with the shakes every
time saw 4 pretty girl approach
ing me, and I'd cross tho street
any time rather than lace one; !;
1wasn't bccanSc / didn't like the
critters. for If | was behind the
fence looking through knot hole:
could not look long enough
Well, my sister Lib gave 4 party
one night, and | started away
from home because | was too bash
ful 10 face the music. | hung
around the house whistiing odd
Dan Tucker; dancing to keep my
feet warm, watching the heads
bobbing up and down behind the
window curtains. and wishing the
laundering party would break ur:
SO 1 could get to my room. |
smoked up a bunch Of cigars, and
it WAS getting late and mighty
uncomfortable; | concluded to shin
up the door post. No sooner said
than done, and soon found MY
self snug in my bed.
Now says |. let her rip!-
Dance till your wind gives ont
And .cuddling down under the
quilts, Morpheus grabbed me.
I was dreaming Of so&t-shcll
crabs and stewcd tripe, and hav-
| ing good time, when somebody
knocked at the door and woke me
up. Rap again. laid low. Rap:
rap, rapv Thea l heard whiS-
pcring, and / knew there was q
whole raft Of gals outside. Then
Lib sings out:
Jack, arc you there ?
Yes, says /.
Then came i roarot laughter.
Let us in said she.
4 WON'T said |. Can't you let
4 fellow alone ?"
Arc you a3ed? says she.
Il am says I.
Get OUT says she.
Il won't,' saysI.
Then came another laugh.
BY thunder! l began TO get
riIed.
Get out, YOU pctticoatcd scare
scrowsr cried. 'Cau't you get q
beau without hauling a fellow ont
| Of bed? l wont 90 home with
you'll won't, SO You may clear
! oUtr
And throwing q boot at the
door, felt better. But presently
| heard a still, small voice. very
much like sister Lbs. and it said :
"Jack, you'll have to get up:
fer all the girls things are there.
Oh, mercy! what a pickle =
Think of me, in bed, all covered
with mufiS, shawiS, bonnets and
cloabs; and twenty girls outside
the door, waiting to get in! If J
had stopped to think | should
have smothcred or the spot. As
it was I rolled out among the bon
net-warc and ribbons in hurry.
Smash went the millinery in cv-
/ cry direction. had TO dress IN
the dark-tor there was crack
in the door and girls will peep
and the way | t'umhicd about was
death on straw bats. The critical
moment came. | opened the door
and found myself right among tic
women.
oh, my lcGh 'rn.. = cried one
Nv dear, darling winter velvet !
cried another, and they pitched
in-,hcy pulIcd Me this way and
that, boxed my ears, and one
bright-eycd little piccc-Sal, her
name was.-put her arms around
! my neck and kissed me right on
! my lips Human nature could
not stand that, and | gave her as
! GOOD as she sent. 1t was the first
time | ever got 4 taste, and ii
WAS powerful COOL. | believe |
could have kissed that gal from
julius Caesar to the Fourth OF
July.
jack said she. we arc sorry
to disturb you, bu: won't you See
me homc?'
! Yes, | will, said |.
! ] did so and had another smack
at the gate.
After that we took kinder
turtle dove after each other, both
Of Us signing like q barrel Of new
cider when VIC were away from