davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
How 10 &c DoHn Men.

1t is not generally known, says the
Lancaster, PENN IIJtsligenee, how
easy a matter it is to explore the bot
tom of q well, cistern, or pond OF
water by the use Of q common mirror.
When the sun is shining brightly,
hold a mirror 50 that the reflected
rays Of light will fall into the water.
A bright spot will be seen at the bot
tom, so light as to show the smallest
object plainly. BY this means we
have examined the bottoms Of wells
fifty feet deep, when half-full Of water.
The smallest straw or other objects
can be perfectly seen from the surface.
In the same way one can examine
the bottom Of the ponds and rivers, if
the waters be somewhat clear and not
agitated by winds OF rapid motion. II
a well or cistern be under cover, or
shaded by building 50 that the sun
light will not fall near the opening, it
is only necessary to employ two mir
rors, using one to reflect the light to
the opening, and another to reflect it
down into the water. Light may be
thrown fifty or q hundred yards to the
precise spot desirable, and then down
ward. We have used the mirror with
success, to reflect light around the
house to a shaded well, and also to
carry it from a south window through
two rooms and then into cistern un-
der the north side Of the house. Half
a dozen reflections Of light may be
made, through each mirror diminish
es the brilliancy Of the light. Let
any one not familiar with the method,
try it, and he will not only find it
useful, but very pleasant expert
ment. 1t will perhaps reveal mass
Of sediment at the bottom Of a well
that has been little thought of, but
which may have been q frightful
scorce Of disease by its decay in the
water.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
OF RUFUS CHOATE,

Rufus Choate and Chief-Justiee
Shaw, Of Massachusetts,, often in
/ dulged in WOrdy cOmbats, and wit
was generally expended by both sides.
Choate was once arguing a case before
the Chief-Justice, (who was one Of the
hOmliest men ever elevated TO the
Bench, and, to express his reverence
for the conceded ability Of the Judge,
said, in yielding to an adverse decis-
ion:
"In coming into the presence Of
your Honor, experience the same
feelings that the HindOO does when he
bows before his idol. know you are
ugly, but I feel you are RreatIn
It is said that Choate had q COM
mand Of language, and his brain teem-
ed with a wealth Of dietiOn truly
marvellous. When Judge Shaw first
heard that there was a fresh edition
Of WOreester's Dictionary out, con-
tanning $500 new words, he exelaim-
ed: 'FOr heavens sake, don't let
Choate get hold Of It."
Choate, In an important assault and
battery case at sea, had Dick Barton,
chief mate Of the ecipper-ship. "Chal-
lenge," on the stand, and badgered
him 30 for about an hour that Dick
got his salt water up, and hauled by
the wind to bring the keen Boston
lawyer under his batteries.
At the beginning OF the testimony,
Dick said that the night was as Ozark
as the devil, and raining like seven
hells.n
Suddenly Mr.. Choate asked him:
WAS there a moon that night2"
"Yes sir.n
"Ah, yes J 8 moon"
"Yes, q full NOON"
"Did you see it?"
mot a mite
"Then, how doyou know there was
a moon ?"
"The Nautical Almanac said so, and
I'll believe that sooner than any law
yer in this wOrld.n
"What was the principal luminaTy
that night sir?n
"Binnacle lamp aboard the 'Chal-
lenge.'" f-H
"Anl you are growing sharp, Mr..
Barton.n
"What in blazss have you been
grinding me this hour fOr-to make
me dull?i'
''Be civil, sir. And now tell me
what latitude and longitude you
crossed the equator in ?"
"ShO'-yOu're joking"
''NO, sir, am in earnest, and de-
sire you to answer me"
81 shanit.n
"Ahl you refuse, do you?"
"Yes-I can't"
'Indeedi You are the chief mate
Of a clipper. ship, and are unable to
answer 50 simple a question:"
YES, tits the simplest question I
ever had asked me. Why, I thought
every fool Of q lawyer knew that there
amt no latitude at the equator"
That fiOored Rufus.-BeRcb and
Bar.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
How to Keep Ice in Summer.

No refrigeratOr or iee-bOx will pre-
vent or even retard the melting Of the
ice which does not combine the follow
ing conditions: First, it must have
double sides, bottom and lid. with the
space between the two castings 1Hed
with some non-conducting substance
capable Of being closely packed, in or
der TO prevent the action OF the exter-
nal temperature and, second, the
inner lid or cover, should be practical
" If not hermetically, alright, in
furtherance Of the same result. II ex-
ternal air enters it viii bring its own
temperature with IL. There should
also be a drainage pipe at the bottom
to carry of, instantaneOusly, every
drop Of water formed by the melting
Of the ice, and this pipe should either
be fitted with trap" or curved in
such a manner as to prevent air from
coming in where the water goes Out.
It is even more indispensable to I 4r-
~ OFF every drop OF the water than a.
is 10 exclude the Rir-a view not gen-
orally entertained by consumers Of
the article, but which, according to
experiments made, seems to be fully
demonstrated. Thus; on exposing a
piece Of ice weighing, say, twenty
hive pounds to the air, at 3 tempera-
ture or seVenty-five degrees, but so
placed that it is perfectly drained, it
will be found to scarcely have disap-
peared atthe end of twenty-four hours.
Wrap the same piece in three or four
thicknesses of blanket or flannel, and
place it in small tub exposed to the
same temDeratlIre. and IL will be all
dissolved in five or six hours. Wrap
the same piece OF ice carefully in q
blanket, and place 1t on q grating, or
on four crossed sticks, so that no wa
ter can accumulate underneath, and
at the end Of three or even four days
twill not have entirely melted.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
.eKiss MiEs nr Fight ;,

There are few married men who
are averse to seeing their wives kissed F;
but q correspondent relates the par
tieulars Of a case in which a newly
made Benedict felt himself insulted
because his wife was not kissed. The
bridegroom in question was a stall
wart young rustic, who was known
as formidable operator in free fight.
his bride was a blooming and beauti-
fUl country girl, only sixteen years OF
age, and the twain were at a party
where a number Of young folks of
both sexes were enjoying themselves
in the old-fashioned style. Every
girl in the room was called out and
kissed, except the beautiful young
bride, aforesaid and although there
was not q yOungster who was not
dying to taste her lips, they were re-
strained by the presence Of her hercu-
lean husband, who stood regarding
the party with sullen dissatisfaction.
They mistOOk the cause, however, for
suddenly he expressed himself
Rolling up his sleeves, he stepped
into the middle of the room, and in o
tone OF voice that secured marked at
tention, said: Gentlemen, I have
been noticing how these things have
been working, here, for some time,
and I amt satisfied. don't want 70
raise fuss, but"
"What is the matter, John ?" in
quired half dozen voices. "Have
we done anything to hurt your feel
ings ?n
"Yes, you haYe; all Of you have
hurt my feelings, and have got lust
this to say about it. Here's every
girl in the room been kissed nigh
half dozen times apiece, and there's
my wife, who consider as likely as
any Of them, has not had single one
tonight; and just tell you now, If
she don't get as many kisses as any
girl in the room the rest Of the night,
the man that sights her has got me to
hght-that's all. Now, 60 ahead with
your plays"
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19

An experiment Of interest to all
travellers has recently been tried on
one Of the English railroad. This ex-
pertinent consists in the introduction
Of what is known as the ''luncheOn
basket system" devised by a well
known firm of public caterers, for the
accommodation Of the travelling pub
lie who have no opportunity TO obtain
refreshments on long Journeys. The
contractors furnish baskets Of an easi-
ly portable and compact size and form,
well stocked with the material for q
comfortable luncheon-thati is 20 say,
half fowl, ham, bread and butter,
cheese, salad, a pint Of claret, or other
light beverage, plates, knives and
forks, glasses and napkins-the price
being three shillings. The baskets,
which are made for the purpose, are
provided with every necessity and
convenience, and inside the lid is az
fixed q printed card requesting that,
as no deposit is required nor charge
made for the use Of the convenience
In the basket, all articles will be re-
placed in their proper positions, and
the basket delivered up complete
at the end Of the journey. American
Hallway managers would do well to
follow this excellent example. Lunch
baskets furnished with the materials
for a comfortable meal will be
accepted as a most agree
able substitute for the saloon system,
which is satisfactory to nobody but |
the constituencies proprieters.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
Whole No. 1859.
A Chinese Puzzle.

A Chinaman died, leaving his prop
erty to his three sons, as follows: To
Fum-Hum, his eldest, one-half there
Of; Nupin, his second son, One-third
thereof; and Ding-Bat his youngest,
One-ninth thereof. When the prop
erty was inyentOried, IL was found to
consist Of nothing more nor less than
seventeen elephants; and it puzzled
these three heirs how to divide the
property according to the terms Of
the viii, without ehOpping up the
seventeen elephants, and thereby Sc
riously impairing their value. Final
ly, they applied to q wise neighOr,
Sum-Punk, for advice. Sum-Punk
had an elephant Of his own. He
drove it into the yard with the seven
teen, and said: Now we will sup
pose that that your father has left
these eighteen elephants. Fum-Hum,
take your half and depart.n So Fun
Hum took his nine elephants and
went his way. Nov, Nu-Pin, " said
the wise man, take your third and
git" So Nu-pin took his elephants
and travelled. ''NOw, Ding-Bat," +"
said the wise man, take your ninth
and begons.n So Ding-Bat took his
two elephants and absquatulated.
Then Sum-Punk took his own ele-
phant aId drove home again. Query:
Was the property divided according
to the will pr
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
For the GEa0sIoI.. 2aEs:..1.s =.
Tour SuperHuous Won
Wy0mlng Editor.

W NAn-Ane AAAseAe
d. l. And it came to pass in the latter
days. that the land mourned because
OF superfiuous women.
2. And a certain seribeS that was
afar OFF in the land said, "Send on
your superfiuous women" Now let
her who puts no furbelOws, neither
fiounees upon her garments, and
tires not her head, depart, for she is
superhuous,
8. And IL woman put not tight
shoes upon her feet, and tightens not
the girdle about her waist, she must
also 20. But let her that is IN the
kitchen, abide there still.
r 4. And II in q house there be many
daughters, and few sons, let the greater
part OF the daughters depart. But II
q woman be not married to husband,
let her make haste and flee I; she is
superfuous; but let her that is in the
kitchen abide there still.
5. And let each one put on coarse
garments, and put on heavy shoes,
and take also q blue cotton umbrella,
and depart for that gOOdly land.
6. And when all of these superhu-
Gus women shall depart, let many
who write with the pen, and some
who snip with the scissors, be told
thereof, so that they may rejoice, and
their cOuntenances be no more sor-
rowful-
Z. And let Ii be made known to
Horace, whose surname Is Greeley,
and to one Tilden, who is judge, aud
to Fairchild who teaches the school
Of the Prophets. --.f-'
s. And when the superfuous wO-
man shall reach that land, let her
make haste and find a kitchen, and
enter in and there abide, and depart
not thence lest some one arise and
call her superhuous, and she be sent
back to her brethren, or to another
strange land, and the superhuous wO-
man find no rest for the sole of her
foot. Written by
GA sUPERFLUOUs WOMAN.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
nImenItIes Of GoInr 10 Heaven.

/ It appears that Millerism Is not yet
dead in spirit, although most believ-
ers of the olden time have become
disbelievers nowadays, after long and
weary waiting for the dies irde which
will never come to the world all at
once. Mrs. Calender, Of Deleware,
and her husband, we're fully persuad-
ed that on Wednesday Of last week.
the heavens were to resound with the
trump Of Gabriel, and they were to be
caught up into the air together with
the rest Of mankind, ahead OF whom
they, however, were determined to
get by being fully prepared. There
was little originality in the mode Of
their preparation as people used to
do when Millerism was epidemic,
they prepared white robes for them
selves and sat quietly within doors
until night came on, when thinking
1t would be easier to ascend from
the roof Of their wOOdshed than up
through the chimney Of their house,
they went thither, going up By
means Of q ladder. In mount
ing, the thought struck Mr., Calender
that il would bewell to sew up their
garments at the bottom in case OF ad-
verse winds, and he retired to the
house for needle and thread. Mean
time his.wife sat shivering on the roof,
and gazing ut the stars as they rolled
peacefully overhead. She assisted her
husband to mount the roof, and then
sewed the dresses as he directed. There
they sat for awhile, shivering in the
cold and holding sweet converse. By
some accident, Mrs. Calender slip
ped from her perch, and being unable
70 achieve voluntary motions by reas-
on Of her sewed dress, slid FOR min
ute, and then rolled of the shed. fall
ing about five feet to the ground. She
screamed Justify for help, but she had
fastened her husband in such q way
that he could not come to her assist
anee for some little time, and when
he had managed to free himself from |
the intolerable bonds, he made the
best of his way down the ladder and |
found his wife pretty badly hurt; so /
badly, indeed, that he had to ride for |
the doctor, who found the lady's ank- |
le disloeated. The good people will |
probably stay In the house when they /
next wish to ascend, preferring to go |
aloft through the crooked fiue Of the |
chimney rather than to roll to the /
ground and go to heaven with broken
shinR
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
A Novel Railroad.

A French engineer proposes rail-
roads having q single rail, upon
which the middle wheels Of the loco
motive and freight wagons run, while
their outer wheels move upon the
common road bed. This rail Is made
like those in use for street car pur-
poses, and known as the V rails, Into
which the wheel fits closely enough
to be retained in position. The road
bed is made Of ties two and q half
feet apart and four feet long, upon the
center of which the rail rests. or
course, that portion Of the road which
the outer wheel travel is well made,
and as hard as practicable. The great
er part of the weight is arranged to
bear upon the rail itself, while the
outside wheels are useful mainly in
keeping the wagons evenly balanced.
Several roads Of this sort are already
in operation in France, and engines
weighing ten tons have been found
capable Of drawing load Of fifty tons
mp an incline Of one foot in fifty, at
the rate Of sixty miles an hour
Smaller engines. Of half this weight,
will draw thirty-dve tons, up q similar
incline, at almost twice the speed
named. Such roads are built, it is
estimated, at 8, 500 per mile, unless
extra road ballasting is required, when
50, 500 will cover their cost. BY the
adoption Of such a system Of roads
every farmer can adjust his wagons
to run upon them, and by tapping one
at any convenient point with road
running from his own barn-dOOr, can
send his truck" literally, to market
In comparatively independent and
inexpensive manner, and without the
delays and transfers now inevitable.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
HOW TO KEEP COOL .


A correspondent furnishes the Lon
don Times with the following hints,
which will be found pertinent to our
own climate:
In these hot days cool apartment
is real luxury to be had far Oftener
than most people suppose possible
The secret consists, not in letting in
cool air, for naturally all do that
whenever they have the chance, but
in keeping out the hot air. II the air
outside a room or house be cooler than
the air inside, let it in by all means ;
but II It be hotter, carefully keep it
out. ...
A staircase window left open du-
ring the night will often cool the
passages OF 3 house, and the rooms,
! too, ifthe doors be not shut; but it
must be closed at eight or nine O'Clock
/ in the morning, or II on the sunny
side, at four or five o'clock, and the
blinds draw down. The mistake peo-
pie generally make Is TO throw open
the windows at all hours Of the day,
no matter whether the atmosphere be
cool or scorehing. -.' .r
Let US have some air, they say, and
in comes the tFeacherOus breeze-fOr
even hot air Is pleasant while It is gem
tly blowing, taking away Precipitation,
and thereby cooling the skin; but
the apartment is made warmer, in
stead Of cooler, and as soon as they
move out Of the draught they find
their room to be more uncomfortable
than before. ... @
Let in cool air-keep out hot-that
is the only formula to insure the min
imum Of discomfort. Sitting-rooms
may generally be kept cool during
the whole day IL the doors be only
opened for ingress and egress, and
the windows be kept closed and
shielded from direct sunshine by q
blind. II the atmosphere Of a room
be impure from any cause, let It be
renewed; hot air IL less injurious than
bsd air. II the room be small in COM
parison to the number Of persons en-
gagged in It, free ventilation becomes
Indispensable. a tl.- E
In q cooking apartment the tenn
perature will probably be higher than.
outside. hence the free admission even
OF hot air will be desirable. II the
persons do not object to sit in direct
draught OF air, windows and doors
may be opened, a breeze being more
refreshing, even though several de-
grees warmer than still air but un-
der nearly all circumstances rooms
should be kept closed as much Is pos
sible until after sundOWn, or till the
air outside is cooler than that inside.
Let in cool air keen ont hot
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19

1t has been argued that life insur-
anee companies might well insure
ministers at lower average rate than
others, because Of their duration OF
life. From certain tables OF vital sta
tisties which have been compiled It
appears that out Of 2,442 clergy OF
different denominations, sixty attain
ed ages ranging from ninety to one
hundred and three years while only
fifty-two died under the age Of forty
One out Of every seven Of the whole
number was eighty-eighty years old
or upward at death. Between one
third and one-half of the whole were
seventy years old or upward at death.
Considerably more than one-half were
over sixty years Of age at death three
fourths were over fifty years of age st
death; and seyen-eighths were over
forty years of age at death.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
ETen.Handed Justice.

In one Of our English exchanges
we find recorded a ludierous instance
Of perverted justice. A grocer Of
Gayton was summoned to appear be-
fore the ToWeester Petty Session to
answer for having in his possession
unjust measures, but in this case the
unjust measures actually contained
more than the standard amount, and
were therefore pronounced, by the
learned magistrate, as "unjust. ~
However, it is satisfactory to learn
that the magistrate refrained from
punishing the offence with the sever
est penalty known to the law, but,
taking into mereiful consideration the
fact, as stated by the learned magis-
trate, "that these measures were
above, and not Under the proper meas
ttre, y a fine Of only Sd. was imposed,
together with the costs, amounting,
to S.. Sd. additional. Our English
cousins always did have a queer way
Of doing things.
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19

The Lancaster, pa Express SAYS
the executors of the estate Of the late
Hon. Thaddeus Stevens will erect a
monument over his grave the present
summer The same paper adds =
when Mr.. Stevens discovered that
there was q clause in the charters of
the several cemeteries prohibiting the
burial Of any but white persons in
them, he declined to take any Of the
lots, and went to Shreiner's private
cemetery, where no such prohibition
existed. He purchased two adjoining
lots. One Of his friends, in view of
the fact that there was no one but
himself to be buried in them, asked
him why he secured so much ground.
oh, well, he replied, in his inimita-
bic humorous way, some poor devil
may come along one Of these days,
and viii have no place to 90. ecan
turn in with. me- y
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19

''Gris," the humorous eorrespon-
dent Of the Cineinnats Times and
Chronicle, has been doing up Missouri,
for that paper. In letter from Pal
myria, Missouri. he gets of the fol-
lowing: "They tell some amusing
anecdotes Of one Of the earliest set
tiers here. He was the first pOstmas-
ter. II a man wanted a letter he
would be compelled to hunt up the
postmaster, and would very likely
find him in a field, plowing. On in
quiry. il there was anything in the
post Office fOr him, the postmaster
would stop his team, sit down on the
ground, and, removing his hat, take
out the letters deposited there, run
ming them over to see if there was
one for the applicant. I declare he
would sometimes remark, this post
office Is Increasing so shall be COM
PEELED to buy a bigger hat.''i
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
II WE ONLY KNEW.

II We only knew the cares and crosses
CroWdtng round our neighbor's way,
II we knew the little losses
Sorely grievious day BY day,
Would We then so often chide him
For his lack Of thrift and gain,
Leaving on his heart q shadow,
Leaving on our life a stainf
II We knew the clouds above Us
Held but gentle blessings there,
Would we turn away all trembling
In our blind and weak despair
Would we shrink from little shadows
Lying on the deWy grass,
While itis only birds Of Eden
Just in mercy flying pastf
II we knew the silent story
Quivering through the heart Of pain,
Would our manhood dare 10 doom them
Back 20 haunts Of guilt aEainf
Life hath many q tangled crossing,
Joy hath many q tale Of woe,
And the cheeks tear-statned and Whiteat
This the blessed angels know.
Let US reach into our bosoms
For the key to other llTes,
And with love toward erring nature,
Cherish good that still survives
So that when our disrObed spirits
Soar to realms Of light again,
We may say. "Dear Father, judge Us
AS we judge our fellow-men."
Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1871-07-19
THE CHRONICLE.
..N0wILAYM ME DOWN no SLEEP. J,

There are two little poems, descriptive q
a child saying this prayer, that are amons
the tenderest in our language. We combine
into one the best OF both:
Golden herd, 50 loWly bending,
Little ieet 50 white and bare,
DeWy eyes, half shut, half opened,
Lsping out her evening prayer.
'lSow lay,"-repeat It darling
Lay me- lisped the tiny lips
or my daughter, kneeling, bending
Ger the folded finger tips.
Down TO sleep, ITO sleep" she muir
's And the curly head bent low;
Il pray the Lord"-I gently added,
you can say Il all, know"
pray the Lord The sound came family,
Fainter still-''Ay soul TO keep
Then the tired head fairly nodded,
And the child was fast asleep.
But the dewy eyes half opened
When claSped her to my breast,
Add thedear voice softlF whispered,
- Mamma, God knows al the rest"
o, the rapture, sweet, unbroken,
or the soul who wrote that prayerl
Children's myriad voices floating
Up TO Heaven, record IL there.
n Of all that has been written,
could choose what might be mine,
Il should be that child's petition,
Rising 10 the throne divine.