The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1871-11-16
How to Pick Out a Good HOss.
BY JOSH BILLINGS.


"a blue, a green, a chestnut, brown,
a dapple, spotted, a cream, buck
skin, or sum Or other good color.
Second-examine his ears see
that he has got tew ears, and pound
a tin pan oldss to him tu find out
whether biz hearing IL good. All
hosses are dun, but def and dun
boss are not desirable.
Third-Look we'll tu hiz eyes see
that he has got pupil in hiz eyes,
and not too large one, neither
Hoses with too large pupils in their
eyes are near-sighted, and kant see
oats, and hav tu wear green goggles,
and green goggles make hOss look
tu much like a trakt pedler.
Fourth-Feel ov hiz neck with
the inside of your right hand see
that the spinal collum IL well fatted,
and runs the whole length ov him.
from fore to aft-a boss without a
good phatt spinal collum from fore
tu aft amt worth-(speaking sudden)
-aint worth a well defined cuss.
Fivo-Putyure hand on hiz breast
(this IL allowable in the case ov a
quadruped); see if hiz harte kan
beat 20; squeeze hiz fore leggs tn
see if he IL well muscled lift up hiz
before feet and see if there iz emmy
frogs in them-frogs keep a hoss's
feet cool and sweet, just as they do
a we'll or a spring Ov water.
Six-look we'll tu hiz shoes; see
what number he wears-number
eight IL about right.
Seven-Run your hand along the
dividing line ov hiz boldly, from the
top ov hiz withers tu the commence
ment ov hiz tail, Cor dorsul vertibra,) }
and pinch him az you go along, tu
see if he knows how tn kick.
Eight-LOok on hiz hind legs for
sum spavins, kurbs, wingalls, ring
bones, skratehes, quittors, thrush,
grease-heels, thorough-pins, spring
halt, quarter, kracks see if he haz
got a whirI-bone; look for sum pin
hips hunt for strains in the back
tendons, let-downs, and capped
hooks.
Nine-investigate his teeth, see
if he haint fourteen years old last
May, with teeth fled down, and a
six-year-old black mark burnt into
the top ov them with hot iron.
Ten-Smell ov his breath tu see
if he haint got some glanders ; look
| Just back ov hiz ears for sighns ov
poIe-evil; pinch him on the tip Ov
biz withers for fstula, and look
sharp at both shoulders for a sWee'
ney.
Eleyen-Hook him tn a wagon
that rattles ; drive him up to ar
Irishman and hiz wheelbarrow
meet rag merchant with cow-belIi
strung across the top ov his cart
let an express train pass him a
Iforty-fve miles an hour; when hi
is swetty, heave a buffalo robe oveI
him to keep oph the cold ride hin
with an umbrel highsted, and learl
his opinyun ov these things.
Twelve - Prospekt his wind
search diligently for the heaves, asl
if be iz a roarer, and don't be afraic
tn find out if he IL a whistler.
Thirtoen-Be sure that he amt
krib-biter; amt balky, amt
weaver, and don't pull at the halter
Theze are few simple things t.
be looked attn buying a good famil.
boss. There IL a CRATE menny Othe
things tu be looked at, (aty yure lei2
ure), after you have bought him.
Good horses are skarse, and goo
f men, that deal in any kind ov horses
J are skarser.
Ask a man about his wife, and h
, may tell you; examine him clus
) for Sunday school teacher, an
= find him all on the square send hir
5 tu the New York Legislature, an
S rejoice that money won't buy him
] lend him seven hundred dollars i
= the highway without a witness
: note even swop dorgs with hill
/ with perfect impunity but, whe
1 you buy a good family hoss 0
t him, young, sound, and trew, waite
: the man cluss, and make up you
mind, besides, that you will have t
ask the Lord to forgive him.
e Gan honest man is the mobiles
r work ov Cod" this famous sayin
: waz written, in great anguish
e heart, by the late Alexander Pop
J, Just after buying a good family hos
Gen. Frank P. Blair GRATED latel
to his brethren at Montgomery, A
n ALBANIA. He began by saying th'
# the triumph of the Democratic part
e was safe, and then proceeded to sho
that its safety consisted in nomina
d ing some good Republican and wOrI
y ing for him with a will. There
strategy in this. Republicans hay
got very much in the habit of beir
"a elected, while it is becoming 10
e. art with the Democrats.
% Somebody told Jerrold that Ge
Ie Robbins, the auctiOneer, was dea
q .'and, of COURSE" added the gentI
- tfL;, bf,,;r,og, ,ryiII oO 70 II