The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-01-28
CREAM OF OUR EXCHANGES.


playful moment she poured PAINFUL OF boiling
water over his head, and then scrapsd the hair
off with the pan, he submitting ITO see now lar
she would GO
John Pope Hodaett has challenged collector
Humphry of New York to fight a duel. 7are
and Guns and 5loody asurtHer!
The Lacou Home Journal says:
A portion of the plastsring in the High School
room fell down on Thursday, striking q little
girl on the head.
That paper fails to state whether the plaster
was injured or not?
There is "A living child in Detroit, only six
inches long, and weighing a pound and two
ounces There Amt enough OF it to cry.-Er.
Yes; and we know its father. He lives in
Illinois, and there isn't much of him either. He
is an editer on u one-horse radical newspaper.
1t is sometimes quite an honor to be public
man." but public woman" is quite different
thing.
All they want is wemans suffrage.
The editor of the Oskslooss C0nsercaor says
that "In writing up the Christmas trees and
festivals 1t omitted the funeral OF the late Mr..
Blattener" Was this tree or u festivslI
The editor of the Grundy Herald eases its
mind and thinks it has answered an argument
against protection aud monoposts by calling us
"a superanuated old fossil" A fossil is an OBJ.
iect of interest, while "Jute bug" 10 an abomi-
nation! We had rather ibs fossil, ''superanu-
ated" or otherwise, than edit newspaper advo-
eating protection for the eastern ,nonopolists to
the detriment of the interests of eur readers and
OF the country in general, AZ the HeralTs .Ju1e
bug does.
Some doctors leave stone uuturned to cure
patient. One in Iowa gave Il woman fourteen
kinds OF medicine to cure the chills. She has
been cold ever since, but hasn't shook a shake,
only when the hearse ran over a stump on the
way to the grave. The doctor has moved away
from there.
The people of Norris are lamentng because
their pole has come down. 1t was beautiful flag
staff on the pinnacle whereof was want to hang
the stars and stripes.
"Wben the cold wind blows, take care of your
nose, that it doesn't get fro.e; and wrap up
your toes in warm woollen hose"
The above we suppose, by the wsv the tale
the value of toes-and also nose so that
while it goes. it may also disclose. to the owner
of tOes-and alsoa noes-the right kiad of clothes
to wear in cold SHOWS, to avoid seipg froze.-Ex.
We wear Mose
The Jacksonville Journal Gays:
Any information which will lead TO the dis.
covery of any very large hogs will be received
with fearful gratitude by the Jackssnv iilc cor.
respondent of the Missouri Demotid Hogs are
his study. Upon his escutcheon blazoned in
letters of living light. these thrilling words:
"Big pig. little pig, root hog or die"
length Of the sermon.
The editor Of the Keokuk Constitu,ios had q
cow.-Champdtgn Union.
Well, did you want him to have oslfs If
50, go there yourself!
The editor Of Tho Galesburg Republican, says
that mine out OF every ten .oun,ry editors are q
fraud and humbug."
"Open confession is good for the soul"
Our political exchanges are quite compliment
aryIto each other. Only little VIII lie ago q re-
publican paper charged that "all democrats are
naturally corrupt, dishonest, sensual and devil.
ish." And now comes a democratic editor who
airs his grammar on the word radical. He SAYS
Radical, compound unconstitutional noun.
Black in person.
Decling in number
African gender.
Desperate case.
Governed by negro-according to Puritan
ruleI:
'One ignorsmus governs another"
care you connected wish paper here 7" asked
csurtryman of All inmate of the Indiana In.
sane Asylum. "Oh, no." WAS the reply, II have
been 10 the Insane Asylum and aul cured: n
man nsver runs II newspaper after ne is cured"
--Er.
The following is joke on the devil:
lady in London somehow got the idea into
her h"nd that the devil was in her and wen, Ia
the cupboard aud hung h,rsels II women go to
hanging themselves for u little ,hin.. like that
they sre guing TO be mighty scarce, that's all.
A radical editor in northern Ilinoi. want. ~
have tie Grand Jury system ,boi.hrd
Wonder what lac ha, been ll..,
They have n"w sor, of .v.r,ul.r it, L.i.,,,
ston county The rou',.. Fire 1r,,i,r saw, ~
him:
Look out for n msu s,n,,N..'i v,i,,,. ur..,. .
tins county huyinr i,rul, II, ..,I. ...vc -,
yon week, look NttN c,,r.l,A :, Won, i,,,o
and l." very particular a. m..f. o. .I.,,r. -.
will thos borrow ten g.. 49,. of ,,u mi 49,.
camp. Some nf our shario,r i,,.e.. i,,,.,.,,
taken It, b., him.
Nio---CArrying sack ut Il r md . mas
.