Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1871-08-25
Varieties.

Inc Original Queue-kluX-IL tEiuese
Chris;isn Bore is the name Of Louisville
preacher.
A California hotel has vase labelled '' = h
picks"
Rel siik pa-aso's viii be tie uobby thing fr
ladies' next season.
Smoking is prescribed f.r lalies afflicted with
hay cold or rose fever.
The northern part Of Illinois boasts post
office named Buncom.
Tonsberg, Norwegian city, celebrated i,s ore
th0usandih anniversary on the 22i Of June.
Conservative old gents a; the South sre Sc
tempting TO revive the fashion Of knee bTeeches
and shoe buckles.
The day to pick your sife Is Choc-c-lsy.
Weddent-iay is the dag t9 be married CT, Of
course
We ought to deeply sympathize with France,
so many Of Us bsye found hospitality under
French roof Lowell Courier.
It is said that one Of the lest lawyers in Col
umbus. Ca. could not read when he WAS nine
teen years old. It isn't stated whether or no be
can now.
Locomotive Ne s, Of toe New Jersey Railroad
Company, is said to be the fastest locomotive in
the United States, having made eighty niac
miles in ore hour.l
The rural portions Of Rhode Island complain
that Providence has too much power N their
legislature IL is a complaint never made ia
any other State in the Union
Bridal cars are proposed for horse railways IN
Chicago. The honeymoons are 10 short there
that newly married couples can't spare the time
for tour out Of the city.
The Chicago Republican furnishes the s0ilov-
ing statistical information -
There are over eleven millions Of hcrses IN
the United States, and only about three thous-
and mayors, including Oakley Hall"
The first carriage that ever entered 70 Semitic
Valley vent in there July q, packed upon the
backs Of mules by livery firm Of MarIposa. Il
is intended for the use Of tourists who ID not
like horseback riding.
A lady q; Lag Branch WAS talking to gen.
tleman next to her at dinner, and becouin. very
animated, shook her small frisette Of false cgrls
in his plate. Tie remarked that it vas the
first time that he had tasted hare soup.
The ale trade Of Boston last year footed I'D
3S2 1856 barrels. and the lager beer trade 81, ,0G5
barrels. The price psid by the retsiers WAS
about three millions Of dollars. their per cent
age Of profit from their customers Is unknown.
bio Lewis declares that the present eyttsm
of employing doctors is wrong, and advises peo-
pie to make contracts ith them at 500 year
for each family, and deduction G.. two dollars
for each case of sickness
Chicago morals are improving. a glsss Of
ice cream eaten on fast dsy by rabbi Of the
Garden City caused his congregation to forcibly
expel him from his synagogue. 1t was reserved
for Chicago to inyent religion without ice
cream.
western city has lately run SO dry in drA-
matte material that logical genius drsmatized
the story Of the " Prodgal Son." making the
sensation turn on a bloody encounter between
the prOdigsl and the swine for the husss
g Do you publish matrimonial notices for the
subscribers to your paperl'' said genilemsnly
looking youth, stepping into our office the other
morning. g Certainly. sir :" Well then,
I'll 60 and get married for | don't see any
other way OF getting my name in your psper,
since you have rejected all my poetcal efTu-
sions p"
Many persons remember Esther Tsylor's
prayer for Abraham Lincoln, thst the Lord
would protect him {" from the creatures who
were trying to bore their way through the
sheathing Of his integrity"
An Albany damsel asked one of her fllow
Ooafueis, s3IlsI uiy goOis cierA. II tne DTeAA-
fast table. g Why is your mustache like my
back hair ?" He blushiugly gave it up the
answer caused him to blush still more, ." Be
cause it is sll down.
i" Mother" said a little girl who was engaged
10 making her doll An apron. g believe will
be a duchess when grow up 90 How do you
ever expect to become duchess, my daughterl''
her mother asked - Why, By marrying n
Dutchman, to be sure" replied the girl
A moral gent Of eighteen summers invested