The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1871-11-05
M,rning Star and Catholic Messenger.
aEw oRLKANs. SUNDAY. NOVEMBER .. 1871.
WIT AND w1sDox.

Kill timef
Charity covers and modesty prevents
multitude of sins.
Take your standard of a man from hi
mind, and not the dress.
Gold is fools curtain, which hides a
his defects from the world.
"Come in out of the wet" as the alliga
tor said to the young niger.
The sorigin of speeches" may often b
traced to the "Veuve Clicquot."
If duck goes into the water for diver
reasons, does he come out for sundry pur
poses.
Why are your nose and chin always a
variance Because words are continually
passing between them.
Happy thought, by cheap shirt-maker
on his own workmen "They come like
shadows, sew, depart"
An incaxrigib,e bore wants to know il
W-o-r-c-e-At-e-r spells Wooster, why R-o-
c-h-e-s-t-e-r don't spell Rooster.
Reputation and Character-Reputation is
what men and women think of us. Char
acter is what God and angels know of US.
Conscience is sleeping giant; we may
luil him into a longer or shorter slumber
but his starts are frightful, and terrible is
the hour when it awakes.
A lady in reply to some guests who
'.Oh, yes, MY husband always buys the
best; he is great epicac."
Carats relate to the fneness of gold !;
karats- relate to the weight of precious
stones. The difference is the difference
between quality and weight.
An ingenious baker accounts for the high
price of his loaves by saying that he has it
on the authority of an eminent naturalist
that the dough belongs to the dear tribe.
A person being asked what was meant
by the realities of life, answered, "Real
estate, real money, and a real good dinner,
none of which can be realized without real
hard work."
Warsaw reporter saw o war among the
wives and widows of Warsaw, aud remarks
that of all the wars we ever saw, we never
saw q war like the war we saw among the
wives and widows of Warsaw.
SAKE says that Vermont is famous for
four staples, linen, women, maple sugar
and horses. The first are strong, the last
are feet, the second and third exceedingly
sweet, and all are uncommonly hard to
beat"
Lord Walsingham; the distinguished
English agriculturfst, wholly dissents from
planted in the same bed with cucumbers
will eventually produce superior quality
of watermelon.
A Hartford editor, having twitted an ed
itor in neighboring city on being bald,
subsequently apologized and explained
that, las long as--can fold his ears
over the top Of his head, he doesn't need
any hair anyhow"
A wag had kept up a continual fire of !
tanical gentleman sharply observed, eff
you keep on you will make every decent !
person leave the house, stThat would be |
o sorry joke" was the dry reply "you
wonld certainly be very lonesome when
left alone"
: Happiness is like mamma, it is to be
gathered in grains, and enjoyed every day.
1t will BOT keep, it cannot be accumulated
nor have we to go ont of ourselves or into
remote places to gather it since it has rain
ed down from Heaven. ut our very doors,
or rather within side them.
Different modes of expression--Giles
jenkins says "The profusion and color of
his Ameiia's hair would lead one to look
upon it as though it was spun by the nim-
BILE fingers of the easy hours as they glided
through bright june days, whose sunny
rays of light had been caught in the meshes
aud were content to go no further" Joe
"Her hair is awful red"
Short is the dream of life. It's hours of
feverish mirth and gentler joy, its days of
overwhelming grief, and silent, keener an
guish soon will end. The frosts of death
soon nip the bearded grain and the brighter
flowers that grow beside. No wealth, no
talent, no grandeur, no honor, can escape
the summons of death to appear before the
great tribunal.
That exceedingly clever college paper,
the Harvard Adrocafe, says that an Am
herst sophomore has devised g. new way of
telling bad news. He writes home to his
father ~ came near losing thirty seven
dollarslast week" Anxious parent writes
back that he is thankful the money was
not lost, and wants to knew chow near"
By return mail: "CGme within one of it
lost thiBty-six."
Many of the eccentricities of Sheridan
Knowles are recorded by j. r. blanche.
The following anecdote of him is amusing:
One day in the country he said to Abbot,
with whom he had been acting there, "My
dear fellow, I'm Off to- morrow. Can take
any letters for you 2" 'You're very kind"
answered Abbot; "but where are you
going 2" ~ haven't made up. my mind"
was the reply.
A presiding elder of the United Brethren
Ckurch, while preaching was much annoyed