The Portland daily press., 1871-08-02
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POETRY.


Kelsey aud Il are Outs
Draw up the papers, lawyer, and make 'em eood
and stout;
For things at home cross ways, and Betsey and
We who have worked together long as man and
wife, .,,
Must I uii in single harness the rest OF our nat
"What is he matter9' say you swan it's nara 10
Most OF the years behind us we've passed b5 very
have no other woman she has no other man.
Only we've lived ose' hec as long as we ever CAM
So Pve talked with Betsey, and Betsey has '"'N
So wee agreed topetbe, that We can't never ag re-
Not that we've caehed each other III a"' 'N
crime; A.. a,rs a little at q
time.
There was stock oftemper we ooth hau LOT a start,
Although we ne'er suspected twoufi take us two
had my various ailings bred in the flesh and bone
And Befsey, like all good women, had temper of
her own.
The first thing remember Wherein we disagreed.
Was somethn concernin heaven-a difference IN
our creed,
We arged tue thing at breaktast-we arg.d the
And the more we arg'ed the question the more we
didn't agree.
And the next that remember was when we lost
She lad kicked the bucket certain the ouesiion was
Only-how?
held my own opinion and Betsey another had
ana when We We're done talkn' we both OF us
were mad.
And The next that RENE Der it started in joke;
But tor full week IL lasted, and netherot us spoke.
And the next time was when scolded because she
And she SAID was mean and stiugy and hadn't any
soul.
Aud SO that bowl kept pourln' dissensions in our
emp; .,
And so that blamed cow crltter was always comm
And so that heaven We ars'ed nearer to us got
But it give taste OF something thousand times
as hot.
And SO the thing kept workn and ell the self same
Always something to arg'e, and somethin' sharp to
say,
And down on us came the neighbors, a couple dozen
And lent their kindest sarvice for to help the thing
along.
And there has been days together and many weary
week
We was both of us cross and spunky, and both TOO
And I've been thinkin and thnkin' the whole of the
winter and tall,
II can't live kind with woman, why, then | won't
at all.
And SO have talked with Betsey, aud Betsey has
And We have agreed together that we can't never
agree;
And what is hers shall be hers, and what is niue
And ri put it in the agreement, and take it to her
to sign. ~
Write ont on the PAPER, lawyer-the very first para
For she has helped to earn it, through many weary
Aud it's nothing more than justice that Betsey has
herIay
Give her the house and homestead; man can
But women are skeery creeters unless they have a
home.
And have always determined and never JAILED to
say,
That Betsey never should want a home, if was
taken away.
There is little bard money that's drawin' tol'rable
couple OF hundred dollars laid by for a rainy da,
Sale In the hands of good men, and easy to get at
Put 10 another clause, there, and give her halt OF
Yes, see you smile, sir, at my givn' her SO much
YES, divorce Is cheap, sir, but take no stock IN
True and fair I married her, when she was blithe
And Betsey was always good to me- excepting with
her tongue.
perhaps,
For me she nittened lawyer, and several other
All of 'em was flustered and fairly taken down,
And for a time was counted the iucklest man In
town,
Once when had fever-I won't forget it soon
Twas hot as basted turkey and crazy as a loon;
never an hour went by me when she was out of
She nursed me true and tender and stuck to me day
and night.
And II ever a house was tidy, and ever kitchen
clean,
Her house and kitchen was tidy as any ever seen;
And don't complain of Bstsey or any of her acts,
Exceptin' when we've quarreed and told each other
facts.
So draw up the paper, lawyer; and IlI 60 home to-
night,
And read the agreement to her and see if it's all
right,
And then in the morHin' I'll sell TO tradin' man
And kiss the child that was lett to u.s. and out in the
world I'n go.
And one , thing put in the paper, that first to me
didn't occur,
That when Pm dead at last she'll bring me back
And lay me under the naples planted years ago,
When she and were happy, before we quarreled SO.
And when she dies, wish that she would be laid by
me;
And lynn together in silence, perhaps we will agree,
AND If ever we meet in heaven, wouldn't think it
queer,
II we loved each other the better because we have
quarreled here,