The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1871-01-21
Selected
Miscellaneous.

b have to labor for living, remember
Se hour in the morning is better than two
bsiieve in going to the bottom of things
&. school Ina am said when she laid a reirac-
trpil over her knee.
sEtarv men have discovered new remedy
x,xication. which consists in eating raw
&es an ordinary 50 Murphy" will cure the
sbstinats ease 10 half an hour. 81 ta5
y ted swain spitefully says: Eve did not
''as much as her daughters of the present
Had they been in her place, instead of being
kd, they would have deceived the devil"
tew York politician, in writing letter of
|ence to Ghe widow of a +" country member -
bad been his friend, says: "a am pained
Ar that-has gone to heaven. We were
b friends, but now we shall never meet
ID not poverty, so much as pretense that
<es i ruined Inan-The struggle between a
man and an empty purse-the keeping up
Low show that must sOOn cUme 70 an end.
. be courage to appear poor and you disarm
rig Of its sharpest sting.
j Dbservant philosopher lately expressed his
= hat Russia and the United States would
e3e and whip out the rest of the world
3 fhis they would turn their attention to each
and make Kilkenny cat-Gght of it. At
inHcture Gabriel would come in with his
& et and give the appropriate finale TO the
''ral places have claimed the champion
man, but Lowell, Mass, can take the belt,
isn't Ben. Butler, neither. a man there.
Employs his father in his shop, lost child,
naturally, the grandfather of the child
To- attend the funeral. The son permitted
p man % 60 to the grave, and when he got
ne dOcked the poor old fellow for half a
lOst time.
fhe Indians cannot get powder and shot
1TIth to hunt for support, they have inge-
enough to derive substitutes whereby To
lneat for their dinners. The Kaw Indians
|hsas are undoubtedly highly susceptible ol
AtIon. They salt the railroad tracks. This
+ cattle IN front Of the trains > the cattle are
and =" LO F" gathers up the carcasses and
by him an abundance Of roasts and soup
hking of Artemus Ward recalls an incident
ming hIm and Ralph Waldo Emerson, which
lever been published. The humorist and
Pc advertised to hold forth on Thursday and
evenings at the same hall in New York
by mistake a cOuntryman who wished 70
ftemus show, vent to the ball on Thursday Y
p OF Friday evening. On coming ont ,.t
pse OF EmeTsOns lecture some one observed
n, . how did you like it?" "If that is
Rus Ward, responded the countrymap.
4 have got to say Is, he is darned fool"
rENILE SAINTs.-Henry Ward Beecber wbiIa
le'es In early conversion, docs not believe
~ sAintShlpe, thinking there is nothing
lnonstr0as than little fve-year old Puritan
'ys; . But those that live and grow up. the
save me from them. Deliver me from nre-
e saintship. cannot endure to see girI
pears old before she is FIVE nor a bow reeit-
f@iah or Dante when is not vet out of his
zee. Old age grated on to a young stalk
'ery poor graft. :
following 10 timely hint for thos. ,.t.o.
iIe 10 advertise their business:
= nen trade grew slack and notes fell dns
nerehant's face grew long and bIue b;s
= r. Sets troubled through the night, with
oali1s all IN sight. At last his wife unto
- rise at once, get out of bed, and
'ur paper INK, and pen, and advertise to all
y men. de did as his good wife advised and
= paper advertised. Crowds came and
y oI all he had his notes were Maid his
bo,r IN giaa' and he will tell YOU to this
"" wen old printers ink repay
- ps. DA9 AN incident of Dickens, read-
Portland recently came To onr Ln+@.,IS iSAu-
VIII Dear telling. A lady Of ercoIisD,,
seuse, out who was not so faniI;ar 81 81 :
3ad 90 os h.gs lung as she might have been
y ~ =. 'He readings, and afterward de-
- .perience as follows: 81 went in
- ~ -, 80 wen Ia 'front.': L was quite alone
- no' see single familiar face around me
ndy Z man rushed on the stage and cr;oS i a.
ey was dead, to begin With II wa. ~
anu unexpected that the announceroaS -
upset me. L turned round to the neor,1o
--L-eiy and me, and asked, What IA
ian Sal They, being of the hauke no5i.s." u.e
as me Instant, but answered no. q ,,.o-s
HeaS sake, said /, will Won tell IL
y me -irhO is dead?' But NOT .
e y youchsafe in response. Their
- INT. 'i6ed nay wonder and mvstifcal
~ thll time [ besousht them. 8 sGsac;ons
% VII none of you tell me what is the
somebody's dead-can.t YOU speak , ,
: rsoAizsd me from head to- foot with a
oos.'H stare, exchanged gIances of derision
'.9u - 10. thelf moaths, Il found could
-. -, W On RON that quarter, 50 looked
--1 seeing no indications of general
efary body intehtly regarding the
- :. Z presently came to the cbncln-