Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1871-02-28
A RACY INCIDENT.
Commissioner Pleasant0n I'm an Embarrassing
Predicament.
Washington Correspondence of the Cincinnati Con

Washington Correspondence of the Cincinnati Com.
| mercial.
/ heard a good story last night
about one new commissioner of in
ternal revenue. | told you in a for
mer letter that the vehement female
committee of eighteen, all strong
minded, was here in perpetual session,
sitting in solemn conclave in Brother
Pomeroy's committee-room, from
which the sensitive and blushing
Scott Smith was driven by their dis
cussions. These females do not pro-
pose to lose anything through lack
of energy and activity. They rush
about in the liveliest manner, cap
turing tne men brutes on all sides,
and strengthing their cause very
much as Sampson carried out the
gates, through sheer force. They
do not seem to have read the Rt.
Rev. Henry Ward Beecher's beauti-
ful little story of the rosebud. In
stead OF wooing with gentle per-
suaslon of the south wind, they come
upon a fellow with the force Of
hurricane.
The other day. Gen. Pleasanton,
delicate, sensitive little gentleman,
was dressing for dinner. He had
Invested himself of every garment
except the one spoken of by Hood
in that melancholy song called the
"Song of the Shirt" He was sailing
about under bare poles when be
heard a knock at the door, and sup
posing it to be his man-who ought
to have been there, and was not
he sang out, Come in" To his ut
ter CONSERVATION, that constitution
al female, known as Mrs. Woodruff,
with peaked hat and a mans over
coat, terminating in unmistakable
crinoline, stalked in. As she did
not Immediately stalk out, but stood
looking at the Commissioner of in
ternal revenue in the abstract, the
last named gentlemen, hiding behind
an armchair, suffered out, Eek
cuse me, madam"
81 want to see you on business,
General Pleasanton."
"Well madam, won't you be so
good as to come to my office. | am
not in condition to see any one on
business just now, and beg of you
TO desist and come to the bureau"
81 don't care any thing about your
condition, Gen. Pleasanton but it is
a matter of some Importance that
L wish to see you upon, and this is
as good an opportunity as any"
"My God, madam" exclaimed the
agonized Commissioner, shifting his
financial person from one leg to the
other, won't you permit me to dress
for dinner"
- 'lve no objections to your
dressing for dinner, but what l want
to know is, what are you going to do
about this Vanderbilt case -? That
Vanderbilt case is great outrage,
sir, and | can see that somebody is
to be swindled out Of half a million
of dollars )" and here followed
statement of the Vanderbilt case,
that occupied just twenty minutes
by the clock, and was very forcible
and emphatic. At the end of it,
when the strong-minded constitu-
tional Woodruff paused for breath,
the Commissioner said:
81 don't know anything about the
Vanderbilt case, madam. | have
not looked at single paper. l have
not heard anything but what you
have told me. | have not had time.
My God, | don't get time to get on
my breeches. | don't want to be
rude, but | wish you would go away
and let me dress"
At that moment knock was heard
at the door, and Pleasanton yelled
louder than he ever gave command
to battalion, "Come in" The door
opened and the substantial figure and
handsome face Of our Commodore
Alden appeared upon the entrance.
So soon as he did this, commissioner
chassezed from the rear of his arm
chair to the back of sofa, and Alden,
thinking he was intruding upon some
tender scence between the general
and the female, beat a hasty retreat.
But the commissioner was not to be
forsaken, and he ran to the door,
jerked it open, and, with the tail end
of his linen flying in the wind, seized
Commodore Alden and brought him
back, when the cool and courageous
Woodruff rose in majestic manner,
and wished them a good day. Pleas
anton sank exhausted in chair, and
begged Alden for little brandy, to
try and rally from this tremendous
attack of woman's rights made upon
him.
with the brief garment of weak defence
He stood appalled,"