Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1871-03-17
HIIlllOr.

out. - yu...., ..rs ,..,.,f t..,, ,,ri,-....,
WHAT theseaboard must bemadeof--
beech't !5 a".. aai lu:1u.-.s .. s.r,.l1
The worst kind of eOnundrum-Rid-
ding with cannon shot. .,...... ,a....
WHAr is it that Adam never saw,
never possessed, and yet he gave to
each of his children? The answer is
parent. a &c. a". 'a.s. .'aaa"
A JOKER being asked whether the
word ''humoi"' should he pronounced
with or without the aspirate, replied,
siYq1mor pronounce il. just as. you
please" ,,,.,....,... .s,. d. .,......,........-
%, THERE is a lad Of our acquaintance who
regards hunger and the chas Sening rod
as about the same thing: both make the
boy holler. sW 1"i ..@ y'e.sIs& &
;@ A FRENcHMAN in Peoria, ILL.,, displayed
his grief at the capitulation of Paris in
a somewhat original manner. He whip
ped his dog to death, .......
A MUSICIAN, in giving notice ofsan fin-
| tended concert at Cleveland, Ohio, an
nourced: "A variety Of other songs
may he expected, too tedious tomen-
tlon.'ug tia a.ata usls sd 6r'lEi..u
TIE New Jersey Senate "ratified the
fifteenth amendment" the other day.
They have now under consideration a
Joint resolution acquiescing in last years
earthquake. '." " ." dell. '..".
"LENNY, you're pig" said a father
to his little five year-old boy. "Now
do you know what a pig is, Lenny?"
" Yes, sir; a hogs little boy" ..,. a.-
RAILROAD managers are perhaps not
10 blame for the conduct of those they
employ, but is it not strange that none
Of them ever hire civil engineer to run
the engine? -'."' 'i '"a.' '!,"a
A DRUNKEN man, sprawling on the
ground in Patterson the other night
anxiously wanted to- know whether
9 any body else had been struck by that
earthquake"
my DEAR" asked John, on observing
new striped hose on his only heir "why
have YOU made barber's poles of Ernes}s
legs ?'' Because he's little shaver"
was the reply. :s...... .n..e
TIE New York Lcader says cutely rs
to the question of original sin "Twenty
wears ago we know all about it. But, as
we grow older, we find that on that sub
iect our faculties fail " u faeI
A LADY once asked u gentleman what
wit was like, to which he replied: I" Like
your ladyship's bottle of sal volatileT-
poignant ut the first opening, but on
being much handled about, it loses all
flavor, and becomes msipid3'>.o ...1"aa
SOMEBODY says "deviln is mean word
any way it may be written. Remove
the d and it is " evil, transpese e and
| il is "vile," remove the v and. it is ill.,
remove the and and | remains, which
| has the aspirate sound Of "heH. "+"
A BosToN preacher is said to have re-
Gently used the following language in
prayer, 40 God this is the most enter
prising nation that ever existed fin the
world! only two hundred and fortyfour
wears ago the wild Indian dwelt where
now we are" etc, with other matter ap-
narently borrowed from political orators.
PUNcm thus describes the present art
of poetry: Write profusion of ryth-
mical and melodious nonsense, amidst
which, at distant intervals,) here and
there introduce an Ineligible line. The
fdullest idea therein expressed will Shine
like star amid surrounding darkness"
Two.TRAvELERs having been assigned
to the same bedroom in a crowded hotel,
one of them, before retiring, knelt
down to pray, and confessed . long cata-
1ogue of SINS On rising from his knees
he saw his fellew-traveTer; IValise in
| hand, going out of the door, and ex-
| claimed: " What's the matter? What's
up?" "OA nothing" was the reply,
"only Pm not going to risk myself with
such a, scamp as you confess yourself to
-be!2 4 Z.g.w,t ...n Gar 90. ...t
| "A PHYSICIAN, who was something Of a
wag, called on q colered Baptist minis
ter. and propounnded few pulling
| questions "Why is it," said he, q" that
that the apostles did? They were pro
tected against posons and all kinds OF
| perils. How is it that you are not so
protected in the same way y?' The col
ored brother responded promptly
. Don't know about that doctor.
spect | is. have TOKEN a mighty sight
Of strong medicines from YOU, doctor,
and | is alive yet" T..
The intelligence of the colored people
is astonishing. A lady called her colored
servant, Joe, and said Joe, ] want
you to go and get qe some shoe-strings.
] want two pairs, the long, round ones"
j 6e went and was gone all day, return.
ing at night with a pair Of ordinary
,shoe-strings and a large package. She
asked him what was in the package.
Why, de pears, of course" She
opened the package and found two
Dears. Joe said he had been all over
town to findstwo "long round pears"
the kind the lady ordered. Efforts are
being made to get Joe into the military
school at West Point.
DURING the trial of a famous divorce
case, now pending in Philadelphia, one
of the lawyers in his argument said
something about awitness named Kelly,
when that individual sung out EYou're
a liar. Kelly was arraigned for con
| tempt Of court until his counsel inge-
niously explained. that Kelly meant no
contempt Of court, but that he was so
carried away by the sweet dulcet strains
of Mr.. Cassidy's voice that he involun-
tarily exclaimed: :" You area 5TeV
thereby Intending to compare Mr.. Cas-
sidv to that delightful Irish musical in
| strument. .fI '''.4 "t. ~. ..-
The following compositions is ased for
preventing the oxidation OF iron, espe-
cially the bottoms of iron ships; Seven
teen pounds of powdered sulphur, FIVE
pounds of the I've of caUstic potash OF
thirty-fve Beaume, and one pound OF
copper filings, are to be heated together