Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1871-05-12
Husbands at Home.


"THE value of thing depends upon
what Il is worth" was the profound re-
mark of man who was more deeply
versed in the daybook than in the die
tionary. But there is an element of wis
dom in the saying, after all. Values are
variable so far as husbands are concerned.
And the value of husband depends very
much upon his conduct at home. On the
street and In his counting-room, the hus.
band is merged in the citizen and the man.
But at home, the noise and excitement of
the world shut out, those nearest and
dearest to his heart around him, the mer.
chant and citizen Is forgotten in the hus-
band and father. And the way he carries
himself there determines his worth to his
wife and children.
This is a matter of more importance
than most husbands seem to imagine. In
fact most husbands think very little about
1t. They are absorbed in other things.
They want good breakfast early, with
no detention on account of missing but
tons, nor leaky pipes, and no requests for
money, and no burden of bundles and er-
rands to disturb their equanimity and
prevent their getting to business on the top
of the day. Drop them out of their front
door in merry mood at hall. past seven,
and they will exhaust the superlatives of
their vocabulary in praise of home. The
day is spent in the drudgery of the shop
or market, amidst the frets, cares and
worries of business, or in work that wea-
lies the body and wears upon the mind.
Ihey read the papers, meet their acquaint-
ances. discuss the questions of the day,
laugh over their jokes, pUclSot their gains
and shoulder their losses as best they can,
take lunch which is often heavier than a
dinner, and sometimes drink what is
harder to carry than any dinner can be.
Six o'clock finds them at home again,
soiled, tired, unsociable and too often ir-
ritable. Their appetite is whimsical if not
whetted by stimulants, and they find fault
with the quality of the meats or the man
ner of the cooking. The prattle of the
children annoys them. A wife's small
talk provokes them to original reflections
upon the hopeless frivolity of the sex, or
upon the sadly overworked and much
abused member, the tongue.
Perhaps cigar has a soothing effect
upon their nerves, and they lounge in
quiet until early bedtime, occasionally
uttering HAPPY thoughts" which they
laugh over and admire, but which to others
are suggestive of a softening of the brain
dull for them. Does the wife play one of
her best tunes, or venture to sing one of
the songs which used to be so much ad.
mired in the old days9 Before she is half
through, she finds her husband fast asleep
on the sofa, or making up a memorandum
for the morrow. Does she propose call ?
lie answers with yawn. And when she
hands him the weekly bills, and reminds
him OF the wants of the household, he
opens his eyes with astonishment, if not
with indignation, and emits calculations
that are anything but melodious or sacred.
In short, II his ill-temper does not make
him a nuisance, his stupidity makes him a
bore.
OF course this does not describe the
home behavior of husbands as a class but
1t indicates a style of conduct of which
there is altogether too much. Such de.
pertinent is fatal to the happiness of home
and to all deep and true affection between
husband and wife. 1t often prepares the
way for separation, if not what is worse
A wife naturally expects to be treated
WIN becoming courtesy and civility, u
say the least, by the man whose attentions
before marriage were so overpoweringly
KIND, whose every word was music, and
whose every act gallantry. She natu.
rally Graves kind attentions, approaching
notice, u sympathutiu look anu air, and
feels hurt at heart by neglect, incivility
and boorishness. And when her husband
makes no effort to interest her, and re-
spends to no effort of her own--when he
denies the kindness which is her daily
food, and the affection which is the vital
ty OF her air-either what is best in hel
heart droops and dies, or fluids satisfaction
elsewhere Fine excuses may be framed
Tor conlugal remissness ON the husbands
part. lie is overburdened with care, worr
down with anxiety, used up with work anc
worry. Which is very true; but this does
not atone for the neglect of those beautiful
| courtesies and affectionate attentions which
wife needs thousand times more thar
anything else, and which are the very lii,
or her LIE; this does not make stupidity
one whit more agreeable, nor ill.tempeI
more endurable, nor human pOrcupine
more congenial companion. A true wifi,
thinks more of her husband than of house.
or costly attire. She sets higher valu,
on his love than ON laces and upholstery
She prefers that he shall come home al
hour earlier, with shorter purse anC
lighter heart. She would have less money
and more man. And if he knows what il
best for his happiness, and his interest too
he will respect her wishes, and make
daily conquest of her heart by behavio
as fine in form as it is affectionate in spirit
There is no sense in letting business wrin,
all the juices out of the body aud the mind
and then dropping dry and listless an,
worthless as a rag into the place whicl
should be the happiest and most sacred il
the world, and the companionsbip whicl
calls for the best and noblest that min,
and heart can give Golden Age.