Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1871-02-23
sesIft Story.
THE DYL OE RED GULCH.
.2DOOE YTu
BY BRET HARTE.

oanuy was very drunk. lie was ~
ing under an azelea-bush, in prett!
much the same attitude in which he hat
fallen some hours before. How long h
had been lying there he could not tell
and did not care; how long he shOult
lie there was matter equally indefinit'
and unconsidered. A tranquil philos
ophy, born of his physical condition
suffused and saturated his moral be
ing. - ts.. MO-
:: The spectacle of a drunken man, anC
of this drunken man in particular, wa:
not, grieve to say, of sufficient nov
city in the Gulch to attract attention
Earlier in the day some local satiris
had erected temporary tombstone al
Sandy's head, beading the inscription
effects of McC Corkle's whisky-killsa al
forty rods, /" with a hand pinting at Nc.
Corkle's saloon. But this l suppose,
was, like most local satire, personal
and was a reflection upon the unfair
ness of the process rather than a COM
mentary upon the improperly ofthe
result. With this facetiOus exception,
Sandy had been undisturbed. A wan.
had cropped the scant heritage beside
him, and shifted curiously at the pros
tfate man a ,vagabond dog, with that
deep sympathy which the species have
for drunken men, had licked his dusty
boots, and curled himself up at his feet,
and lay there, blinking one eye in the
sunlight, with a stimulation of dissipa-
ton that was ingenious and dog-ike in
its implied fattery of the unconcious
man beside him.
Meanwhile, the shadows of the pine
trees had slowly swung round until
they crossed the road, and their trunks
barred the open meadow with gigantic
parallels of black and yellow. Little
puffs of red dust, lifted by the plunging
hoofs of passing teams, dispersed in a
shower upon the reeumbent man. The
Sun sank lower and lower; and still
Sandy stirred not. And then the re-
pose of this philosopher was, disturbed,
as other philosophers have been,s by
the intrusion of the unphilosophical
sex. .l 81
'Miss Mary" as she was known to
the little flock she had just dismissed
from the log schoOl-house beyond the
pines, was taking her; afternoon walk;
Observing an unusually fine cluster of
blossoms on the azelea bush opposite,
she crossed the road to pluck it-pick-
ing her way through the red dust, not
without certain fierce little shivers of
disgust, and. some feline circumlocu-
tioIl. And she came upon poor Sandy,
{ & i AZ . r j., q
OF course she uttered the little stac-
cato cry of her SEX. But when she
had paid that tribute to her physical
weakness, she became. over-bOld, and
halted moment, at least within six
six feet of this PROSTATE monster, with
her white skirts gathered in her hand
ready for flight. But neither sound
nor motion came from the bush. With
1ne little foot she then overturned the
head-board, and muttered
''beasts p'-ah epithet which probably
classified In her mind the entire male
Of Red. Gulcf. For Miss
Mary, being possessed of certain rigid
notions of her own, had not, perhaps,
appreciated the demonstrative
for which the Californian is
so1ustly celebrated, and had as new
conner, perhaps fairly earned the. repu-
tation Of being ssstuck up." COS y
As she stood there she noticed also
that the slant sunbeams were heating
Sandy's head to what she judged to be
an unhealthy temperature, and that
his hat was lying uselessly at his side.
To pick it up and place it over his
face was a work requiring some cour-
age, particularly as his eyes were open.
Yet she did it and made good her re-
reat. But she was somewhat concer-
ned, on looking back, to see that the
hat was removed, and that Sandy was
looking up and speaking.
The truth was, that in the calm
depths of Sandy's mind he was salts
fed that the rays of the sun were bene-
fetal and healthfill that from child
hood he had Infected to lying down in
q hat that no people but condemned
fools, past redemption, ever wore hats
and that his right to dispense with
them when he pleased was inaliena-
BILE. This was the statement of his in
ner consciousness. Unfortunately, its
outward expression was vague. being
limited to q repetition of the following
formula "Su'shine all righ'! Wasser
ma'er, Ell? Wass up? Su'shine ?"
Miss Mary stopped, and, taking fresh
courage from her advantage of position,
asked him if there was any thing he
WAS up? Was ma'er ?'' continu-
ed Sandy, In very high key.
aGet up. YOU horrid man ~ said Miss
Mary, now thoroughly incensed "get
up and go home"
Sandy staggered to his feet. He was
six feet high, and Miss Mary trembled:
He started forward a few PAGES and
fHWass + go home for?' he suddenly
asked, with great gravity. stL Ig9..gg
s'Go and take bath," replied Miss
Mary, eyeing his grimly person with
great disfay0r.
To her infinite dismay, Sandy sud
denly pulled off his coat and vest, threw
them on the ground, kicked off his
boots, and plunging wildly forward,
darted headfong over the hill in direc=
ton of the river, .ffat
9sGoodness Heavens!-the man will
be drowned!', said Miss Mary; and
then. with feminite inconsistency,
she.ran back to the schOol-house and
locked herselfin.
That night, while seated at supper
with the hostess, the blacksmith's wife
itcaIme to Miss Mary to ask, demurely
if.her husband ever got drunk. CAB
ner,Y responded Mrs. Stidger, refiec
lively, "let's see; Abner hasn't beer
tight since last election" Miss Mary
would have liked to ask if he preferred
lying in the sun on those occasions, ano
II a cold bath would have hurt him; but
this would have involved an explana
tion, which she did not then care tt
give. She contented herself with open
ing her grey eyes widely at the red
checked Mrs, Stidger,- a fine specimen
then dismissed the subject altogether
The next day she wrote to her deares
friend, in Boston: 81 think / find the
| intoxicated portion of this community
the least Objectionable. l refer, my
dear, to, the men, of fcOurse. 1 do no
| lynoxtyJ oy,x,fbfy,or that poIl1d make th,