Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1871-02-10
CURRENT ITEMS.
To Knnr DnY-Liye on Goldfish.

DANehRoUs AssooIArEs-Tho who
are dressed TO kill" &.mst hA
IF you have means live within them; If
you have not, live without them.
THE seed cane in Louisiana was seriously
injured in December, and the sugar crop
of 1S7l,will be short tlllt fl.t-.
The WASHINGTON Life is substantial in
its assets, elevated in its standing, and care
fully energetic ip its management.-GEo
L. HoPEs R-H N&E a
SWIMMING is said by the doctors to be
very good exercise for persons health
but many poor wretch has come to his
death by,it lN ~ Heet
A ooUNTRYMAN went to the Terre Haute,
Ind, gas works the other day for Jug full
OF gas to burn in coal-oil lamp.
A NEwvYoRK cat was so rash as to lick
the check of lady of improved complex
ion, and in a few minutes was no more.
WEST VIRGINIA law requires ministers
to give bond for 81 500 before they are au-
thorized to perform the marriage cere-
mony. ,, ,ttr
THE prisoner has q very smooth counte-
nance" "Yes-he was ironed Just before
he was brought in," That accounts for it,
A MAN in Washington got back stolen
coat worth $40 by legal process at cost
of $2J for lawyers fees and loss of wages
A WIDOW holdinga policy in the Mutual
Life, of Chicago, on her deceased hus-
bands life, gets the money herself. 1t
cannot be. taken for his debts.
IMPORTS at New York during a recent
week amounted to $0,705, 764, one of the
heaviest values ever reported in single
week. The duties were nearly $2,000,0 900.
A MAJOR in the Peruvian army has con-
structed monumental clock in Lima,
which is said TO be as wonderful as the
famous Strasbourg clock. ga
Coon whisslers are getting skarce 70
years agottheylw were plenty, but the desire
tew get rftch, or tew hold offls, has took
the pucker out of this honest and cheer
full amusement,-Josh Billings
MRr "CHAwLs THAwMPsoN recently
ran his head against young lady during a
cotillion. "Ahl excuse me, deah," he
cried; "did it hurt, ahg" "No, sir" she
replied, '"i it's too soft to hurt any thing"
In Louisville, q few days ago, John Hay
den scratched his hand with a bit of glass,
and died within forty-eight hours there
after, erysipelas attacking the wound and
spreading into the heart. u.
AN old lady in New Jersey, having read
an account of the bursting of grindstone
in manufacturing establishment, became
terribly alarmed least the grindstone stand
ing in her cellar should burst and blow the
house uHB
A BRUTAL man in Marblehead, Mass.
went home drunk the othert day, and
thrust his wife out of doors and broke hel
leg. 1t was set, and few nights after
wards he went home, drunk again, and
broke her leg again in two places.
A QUAINT old gentleman of an active
stirring disposition, had man at work in
his garden who was quite the reverse
Jones" said he, did you ever see a snail p
Certainly said Jones. Then" SAID
the old boy, "you must have met him, fol
you never could overtake him."
A MATHEMATICAL friend is botherine
his head over the following problem: L
dogs with 10 legs can catch so rabbit.
with 27, in Id minutes, how many leg.
must the same rabbits have to get away
from dogs with 80 legs, in II minutes
and halt-allowing 365 days in the year
PORTLAND, Ne, rejoices in usefu
Newfoundland dog. Let horse run away
and he Immediately seizes the bit, and by
his united strength and dead weight stop,
1t almost instanter, and thereby prevents
smasR-up, if not more serious conse
quences.
AN ingenious wife in Des Moines, Iowa
cured her husband of snoring thus: Sh,
had a. gutta percha tube, with two cup
shaped ends; one she put over his nos,
and mouth, and the other over his ear
He consumed his own nose, as a stov,
does its smoke, and woke up instanter.
In a remote part of Germany, a farme
recently turned up with his plow 13,O0C
Roman coins, of an Unknown metallic com
position. They are thick and heavy, anC
date back to Mare Antony, Hadrian anC
Commodus. The heads are finely done
and the Inscriptions unusually plain.
The Lafayette Ind) Journal says
We saw man at the hay market, yester
day, who followed poor COW some dis
tance, and took wisp of hay out of he
mouth, which she had filched from hi
load. That man will never die poor"
THE Kenosha (Wis) I6legraph tells o
a woman in that city who placed pocket
book containing $50 in the parlor stow
for safe keeping While absent from home
her husband built fire in said parlo
stove, and said pocket book and content
are not.
In Chihauhau, Mexico, gold field ha
been discovered at place called Hormi
gas, twenty leagues from the capital. TIL
discoverer gathered twenty ounces of gol'
in one day. People are focking there il
masses, il is said, and all are doing vel
Farm laborers are abandoning their work
A WOULD -BEscHooL-T TEACHER in Ala
bama replied to question by one of tn
examiners, "Do you think the world i
round or flat? by saying, Well, som
people think one way and some another
and I'll teach round or fiat, just as tn
parents please"
Boston apothecaries are moving for
law declaring in effect that no persol
shall be allowed to engage in the retail
drug business unless he have diplom
from regular college of pharmacy, or ha
passed a satisfactory examination befor
an examining board, after serving regu
lar apprenticeship Of four years in dis
pensary.
THE Portland (Me,) Company have com
pleted a mammoth fog-whistle for tn
Lighthouse Department. 1t is the larg
est whistle ever manufactured in tn
United States and, probably, in the world
1t is an 19inch whistle, weighs some 40
pounds, and will require steam boiler O
50-horse power to furnish the steam +
blow it.
THE young man who will distance hi
competitors is he who masters his busi
ness, VINO preserves his integrity, Wh
lives clearly and purely, who devote
his leisure to the acquisition of knowl
edge, who never gets in debt, who gain
friends by deserving them, and who save
his spare money,
ABOUT twenty couples in New Or
leans have been greatly shocked upol
learning that clerk in Judge Shelley
effice forged the name of the Judge Il
their marriage licenses, and appropriate,
to his own use the money that they pai
therefor They do not quite know
whether they are legally married or moi
Four couples were married in Bath
England, short time since, who were al
deaf and dumb, and, not being able to 6
through the service in the customary man
ner, followed the minister in his readin
by running their fingers along the print
and, when the all important question wa
reached, "Wilt thou have" etc, the