Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1871-08-05
Gatherings by the Wayside.

Why are black eyes called piercing ?
Because they can look daggers when they
like.
When girl falls in love with an un-
lucky Irishman, her heart always goes pity
Pat.
The woman that makcth good pud.
ding in silence, is better than one that
maketh tart reply.
Prentice says man was the chief con.
sideration at the creation. Woman was
only "a side ISSUE"
A man who has repeatedly tried them
says that all the short cuts to fortune are
horribly overcrowdcd.
One who wishes the world to know
what he knows about farming, says the best
way to raise strawberries is with spoon.
The women of Bloomington, Illinois,
have built up within the last Eve years a
libary numbering four thousand volumes.
A resident Of Connecticut boasts that
for cighty.four consecutive years he has
eaten his Thanksgiving dinner in the same
house.
The convicts in the Iowa peuitentiary
lament the absence Of woman's refining in.
fuence. There are no females in the in.
stitution.
"A correspondent of the St. Louis Re-
publican has travelled three hundred miles
through Arkansas, aud has not heard of q
Ku-klux outrage.
IA German religious fanatic has Civ.
en- n church $4,000 guilders, on condition
that his body be embalmel, nailed to q
cross and placed in the organ loft.
A Texas paper reports that since Sep.
tember last, 10000 people, with 1,164
wagons, have emigrated from Tennessee
and Georgia into the Lone Star State.
-" Now mind you" whispered servant
girl to her neighbor, 81 don't say as how
missus drinks but between you aud me,
the decanter don't keep full all day."
"A poor man who was i'll, being asked
by a gentleman whether he had taken any
remedy, replied: "No, amt taken any
remedy, but I've taken lots Of physic"
Public record is made of the fact that
Grant has spent three days in Washington
since the first of June. Close attention to
official duties is Grants crowning virtue.
"A Mississippi farmer lately tried coal
oil as remedy for potato bugs, and me,
with eminent success. 1t killed bugs,
vines, and everything else it came in con.
tact with.
The Ohio Statesmas says that at tho
time Of his death, Vallandigham had in
course Of preparation for the GALAXY, an
elaborate article on the so.called " new do.
parture."
"A ten year old miss told her mother
the other day, that she was never going to
marry, but meant to be widow, because
widows dressed in such nice black, aud al.
ways looked so happy.
A little Boston girl joyfully assured
her mother, the other day, that she had
found out where they made horses" she
had seen man in shop just finishing
one Of them, for he was mailing on his last
foot"
The Terre Haute, Indiana, Gazette
Radical, is not for Grants denomination
itsays: "We have been Republican q
long as there has been Republican party
and We will not vote for his nomination
nor for him if nominated"
"A Sioux City justice in pronouncine
sentence upon chicken thief, addressed
him thus: Young man, God Almighty
your great Creator, endowed you with rea
sooing faculties and the possession of az
immortal soul, bxt instead eftAat, you &c
about the country stealing chickens"
Benedict Arnold's autograph sold fol
two dollars and twenty. Eve cents 10 New
York the other day, while Lafayette,
brought but one dollar and ten cents, thu.
adding one more to the long list of exam
pies of the fact that in this world virtue i,
alta discount and villainy at a premium,