Eaton weekly Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1866-1875, 1871-07-20

is the shape Chillicolhe takes on a letter
~ hich was mailed at Columbus yester-
day.
A "magnificent gift enterprise - lately
broken up by the police at Cleveland,
was found t., be conducted ON capital
of four dollars and few odd cents.
An Elmira editor, speaking of the
M lrrfage of a brother quill, says: "It's
sad, however. this partii g with old
iri' nds. One by one they drop off and
double"
A son of Erin just arrived in this land
Of plenty, beng in want, was told by
person to whom he applied 'or aid. to go
to-, gener;ly considered n very warm
region. "Civility indade," said Pat, F'to
invite me to your fathers house"
''Gentlemer and ladies, said the show
man. "here you have a magnificent
painting of Daniel in the lions den.
Daniel can be easily distinguished from
the lions by the green umbrella under
his lett arm.''
To be happy, the passions must be
cheerful and gty. not gloomy and melan-
choly. A propensity to hope ami joy is
real riches; but one to fear and sorrow.
L, al poverty.
An Australian gentleman, examining
covered with tar and wool. He went
and got himself photographed in this
guise, and sued his assailants tor $4,000
!amages,. putting in his picture as evi-
dence.
There has been an item going around
about a hen in Boston laying eggs so
small that twenty-One of them were put
in collar box at once. That looked
like pretty small business for an able
hodied hen, until the author of the story
was discovered. He said ii was a horse
collar box he meant.
An Arkansas lady named Emily Sarah
Lord is reported To have had nine hus-
lands in ten years. Two died with
suspicious suddenness, and three Nere
,ivorced. What has become of the
OF hers is not stated. An exchange says
he is misnamed, for evidensly she is an
Emma Sarah of Satan.
A diseusted amateur fruit-raiser says:
81 have no more admiration to waste on
the father of George Washington for
forgiving the destruction of his cherry
tree. A cherry-tree is only curculio
nursery, and the day my young George
ii Ii 4tchet, and tell him to down with eV-
cry cherry-tree on the place."
The st. Louis Dispatch is shocked at
it knows OF, and reads them the follow
ING little lecture: "Dun't say, pass the
krout,' or shove along the hash > we'll
conducted boarders always say, will you
be- so kind as 10 escort the lubscOuse hith-
erward.'"
A letter addressed "To Eny Prominent
BusisaniSs Man Handeling Butchers
Stock Quincy IIls.,'' and containing the
following marginal directions: ''Post
! master will pleas hand this to some tat
l..ILLle MN" WAS received at the Post
| Office in Quincy recently. IN urcordntree
| with the request, the letter was handed
to the fattest cattle man in the town.
A Prussian cavalry officer, WHO was
| badly wounded at tie battle of Grave
rotte, was greatly annoyed by the cries
Oh some wounded soldiers lying near
| MIN. He stoud the annoyance us long
as he could, and then testify called out /:
stop that bowling over therel Do you
think you are the only persons killed in
| this tight!' ..-.. .E
| 1t you will but make an effort, how
easy il is to restrain our emotions. A
lady was one evening present at the per-
loI nance of Voltaire's ''Melope" and to
the surprise of every one uid not shed
tear. Perceiving the surprise, she said,
Il could. indeed, have wept, but L am
going out Tonight to supper"
A Troy paper gives the following sad
result of the lick OF street sprinkler:
Miss Smith sailed forth III the morning
ith be uLI ul pearl and rose complex
| ion. By noon she was brown as an
| Egypt, II mummy-the gentle rain lad
| cut r;lVines and cutters in her cheeks,
and made war-map round her mouth"
| A lady requests the Washington Chron-
| N afN -t.fiS
Ity oung men of all shapes and sizes,
rom the tail dandy with hair enough on
his upper lip to stuff II barber's cushion,
down 10 the bow-legged, freckle-f faced,
carrot-headed upstait, to form a gaping
crowd t" stand at the doorways when
evening assemblages are dismissed, TO
stare at the ladies and make remarks
.buut their persons and dress.
An awkward looking stage-struck
| hoosier went to see one of the theatrical
managers at Philadelphia lately, and So
| 'icited an engagement. "Wliat role do
you prefer, my friend 20 asked the man
ag,r. "WelI, Squire" said the would he
| American ROscius, 81 amt partial to
rolls, no how; corn-dodgers is my
| tavoritc.''
At meeting of spiritualists at Sagi-
more. Moses Hall. one of the speakers,
|
faces around his bed every night, and
| knew they were faces If, the spirit
land. His mother reproved him by
te ling him Ito go to sleep, for nothing
allied him but worms The Enterprise
l.rotanely adds: ''We guess mother WAS
right"
The effects of the hot weather are
easily diScernible in the discussions of
our rural contemporaries. One of the
lie Roy (llllEoisl editors worked him
sell If in this way concerning his neigh
bor, last week: E'To sum up, he is Il vii
i:,in of the deepest hue, Il pusiIlani nimuus,
significant and diabolicaI scoundrel ;
the last cur of original sin; fly blown, ,
sinking, treacherOus carcass and made
up out OF the skimmings OF hell's off
| scourings."
| WILLARD Young, cadet at West Point,
told an Interviewing reporter, the OTHER
| day, that he has sixteen brothers and
twenty two sisters. LII regard 10 Ehaz-
ng,' the young prophet complained
''lf the cadets see us go by, they spit out
their quius of tobacco on the grass, and
then old+r us i'll the most peremptoIy
way to pick them up with our fingers
and carry tn, m off the g,ound. Now, /