The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1871-03-24

/ heard good story last night about
our new Commissioner of Internal
Revenue. I told you in a former let
ter that the vehement female commit
tee of eighteen, all strong-minded,
were here in perpetual session, sitting
in solemn conclave in Brother Sena-
tor Pomeroy's committee-room, from
which the sensitive and blushing Scott
Smith was driven by their discussions.
These females do nor>propose to lose
through lack of energy and
activity. They rush about in the live
hest manner, capturing the men
brutes on all sides, and strengthening
their cause very much as Samson car
ried out the gates, through sheer
force. They do not seem to have read
the Right Rev. Henry Ward Beech
er's beautiful little story of the rose
bud. Insteid of wooing with the
gentle persuasion of the south wind,
they come upon a fellow with the
force of hurricane. II.
The other day Gen. Pleasanton, n
delicate, sensitive little gentleman,
was dressing for dinner. He had di-
vested himself of every garment ex-
cept the one described by Hood in
that melancholy song called The
Song of a Shirt" He was sailing un-
der bare poles, when he heard a knock
at the door, and supposing it to be his
man-who ought to have been there
and was not--he sang out "Come in!'
To his utter CONSERVATION, that con-
stitutional female, known as Mrs.
Woodruff, with peaked hat and a
mans overcoat, terminating in unmis-
taxable crinoline, stalked in. As
she did not Immediately stalk out, but
stood looking at the Commissioner of
Internal Revenue in the abstract, the
last-named gentleman hiding behind
an armchair, suffered out, Excuse
me. Madam
81 want to see you on business,
Gen. Pleasanton."
"Well, Madam, won't you be so
good as to come to my Office. I am
not in q condition to see any one ON
business justnow, and beg you tode-
sist and come to the Bureau" 44
"I don't care anything about your
condition, Gen. Pleasanton; but it is
a matter of some importance wish to
see you upon, and this>is as good an
opportunity as any," aissa
my God! Madam, exclaimed the
now agonized Commission, shifting
his financial person from one leg to
the other, won't you let me dress for
dinner"
"I have no objection to your dres-
sing for dinner, but what, I want to
know is, what are you going to. do
about this Vanderbilt case? That
Vanderbilt case is a great outrage, sils
and I can see that somebody is to- be
swindled out of q half million dol
lars"
And here followed a statement Of
the Vanderbilt case, that occupfl just
twenty minutes by the clock, aud was
very forcible and emphatic. At the
end of it when the strong minded con-
stitutional w oodhull paused for breath,
the Commissioner said: sa
"I don't know anything about the
Vanderbilt case, Madam. i have not
heard anything but what you told me-
I have not had time. My God, I
don't want to be rude, but I do wish
that you would go away and let me-
dress"
At this moment knock was heard
at the door, and Pleasanton1 yelled
louder than ever he gave command to
battalion, ssCome inp' The door
opened, and the substantial figure and
handsome face of our Commodore Al
den appeared upon the entrance. SO
soon as he did this, the Commissioner
chassezzed from the rear of his arm7
chair to the back of sofa, and Alden,
thinking he was intruding upon some
tender scene between the General and
the female, beat q hasty retreat: But
the Commissioner was not to be for
saken, and he ran to the door, jerked
it open, and with the tail of his linen
flying in the wind, seized Commodore
Alden and brought him back, when
the cool and courageous Woodruff
rose in majestic manner and wished
them good day. Pleasanton sank ex-
hausted in q chair, and begged Alden
for little brandy, to try and rally
from this attack of woman's rights
made upon him. So
with the brief garment of a weak defense,