The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-08-12
Budget of FUN.

Prem n. Brunswick On. J

bakers Will appreciate this: WY -
chrysais like a hot roll Because it's the
grub that makes the butter fiy!
Zone of the best riddles that ever was made I;
but may We ask you, whilst on the butterfly
theme. would not butter by be better name
for this insect than butterfly n
Why is baker most imprOvident person
Because he is continually selling that which
he kneads himself,
Why is good husband like dough |!
Doughn't you know ? Why, it is because a
woman needs HIM,
And when woman who has got the husband
she has (k)neades, 81 chews that man." she
says, ''because think he Is soft and good,
and will easily be made dough masticated u
Why does the sun rise in the east? Be-
cause the (y)east makes everything rise.
Why is the French cook at the Reform Club
like man sitting on the top Of st. Paul's.
Because they are both in high cool an airy
Culinary situation
You know what the Latin proverb says
about this-"Cook alas non facit money
comer-so look at your monthly bills I.
liza Frenchman were to fall into a tub of
grease, by, "Vat Won Engleesh word voo!d he
eggspraice hees meesherarbler poseeceeon ~
f wood say, "In de fat gable "
State the difference between grocer SELL
inga pound OF sugar, and an apothecary's boy
with a pestle and mortar! One weighs a
pound, the other pounds away.
Now does an apothecary ever give his wife
medicine to prove if she's pestle and mortar
pshaugh we mean to prove if she's mortal and
pest her
Apropos of this poor woman, who would
soon be under ground, why is gritty coffee
like the Metropolitan Railway 1t may be
considered underground.
Do you take sugar Yes, please, two
knobs" All then we may as well tell you that
the word is derived from the Sancrit ''sacchar' y
accounts for the sa',ds-sritty sugar were not
unfrequently meet with.
What is the difference between n sweet
breud and sugar j09f. Well, you see, many
authors differ on the subject Cicero laid
down one theory. Contucius another, and as
for Gibbon, though we may Gibbon reading
him over and over again, We learn nothing
SO you see the upshot OF 1t ali is that we -
don't know anything at all about it
The reader is here permitted to cXclaim,
"This joke IS by man hid i grease (many de-
grees) the stupidest / ever heard We en-
tirey agree with the reader quite so We may
be happy Yeti
Why is this charming book like giving you
your choice of two sorts OF meat for dinner
Because it's beef or eve (before you).
When can an Irish servant answer two
questions at the same time When asked
''What o'clock, and where's the cold chick
enf' II she replies, Sure its ate!
This rather reminds US Of the German who
on being asked his and his wifes age, answer
ed, Il am dirty, and she's dirty-two!'l
Riddle for "Pell Nell" couple: When
does lady think her husband Hercules
When he can't get on without his "club"
She ought to try Omphales plan, to tri
umpha'ly conquer him
Apropos of Pail Mall, who first introduced
walking-stcks? Eve gave Adam little
Cain.
Who again, in his turn. was the introducel
OF clubs Probably he had "Whte's in hi
eye; at any rate, we may, without disrcspect
say it wasn't a JOKE e)y club Cor Abel
When Cain slew his brethcr, What suitable
ejaculation from his lips would have also ex
pressed his liability to punishment Amen
able (anenablc)
The extreme coldness between the tw,
brothers gave rise, we believe. to the first in
stance Of sleighing on record 7
Why was the Giant Goliath very much a
stone-ished when David hit hia with a stone
Because such thing had never entered hi:
head before.