The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1871-01-05
WIT AND HCMOR.

generally come from lasscs.
Should the European Powers got
into q fight oyer the Sublime Porte,
what q strong argument it would be in
favor Of temperance.
A Young lady went into music
store, and asked the clerk # he had
Loving Eyes" (the song.) Ae re.
piled, I'm told 50 by the girls
"A Wisconsin paper mentions .
ease where burglars broke into store,
but the goods were marked so high
that they would not take any away.
"A line in one Of Moore's songs
reads thus: Our couch shall be roses
with dew To which q
sensible girl replies, "Twould give me
the rheumatic, and 50 it would you
"A Vermont girl wants to know if
the woman's rights movement includes
the right to do the counting, If it
does, she is in for it, as the men in her
vicinity are vety bashful. There is
something practical in that
1t may be said generally of hus-
bands, as the woman said Of hers, who
had abused h:r, TO an old maid who
had reproached her for marrying him,
TO be sure. he is not as good hus
band AS he might be, but he is 4 power
full sight better than none"
Husbands, desiring to maintain
peace and quictncss in their domestic
circle, should be careful not to swap
ovcrcoats with single gentlemen who
make their pockets repositories for
tender cpistIes from large circle Of
female acquaintdnccs
During 4 recitation on natural his
tory in one of our well .hnown colleges
1 student in the pursuit OF knowledge
concerning the habits Of animals,
said; "proiessor, why does q cat,
while eating, first turn her head one
way, aud then the othcl - For the
reason replied the professor, ''that
she cannot turn both ways at once
One ot the physicians in Buriug
ton, VI, driyirg,into town on election
was met by friend, who
hailed hlm with the question;
Have You voted -
Not yet replied the doctor; "but
| have been out all night after voter
/ got him safe, too"
when vii. ne vote"
"Qh, about twenty one years from
now"
A young man, becoming engaged
recently, was DESTROYS Of presenting
uis intended with ring appropriately
inscribed; but being at Il loss what 10
have engraved upon it, called upon hS
t.,thel for advice. "Well,' said the
old man, put on: when this you see,
remember me- Tho young lady was
much surprised Il few days after ut re-
cc;ving beautiful ring with this in
scrption: When this you see, remcm-
Der Jdtdsr.'
Jessie had been doing something
which her mama had told her she must
moi do. She had been eating currants,
and, Of course, got her mouth all
stained that's the way she was found
out. Her mama said: "You know
YOU were forbidden to eat currants."
But, mother, Satan tempted me-
Why didn't you say, Get thee behind
me, Satan;'" II did say Get thee
behind me, Satan and he went and
got behind me, and pushed me right
into the currant bushes"
-Waltzing is. no doubt, to those
participating, delicious excitement,
hut to the looker-on, who sees the arm
OF u rival embracing the girl lie adorcs.
the sensation is not very comfortable.
Henry EneleiicId has thus expressed
the lattcr's feelings:
What! the girl adore by another en-
braced.
What! thc balm of her breath shall anoth
er man taste!
What! pressed in the whirl by another's
bold knee!
What. painting reclined on another than
Sir. she's yours. You have brushed from
the :. rape it's soft blue;
From the rosebud you've shaken the trcm-
ulous dew;
What you've touched you may take. Prct-
ty waiter. adicu.'
THE PAsHUNCE OF JOB.
Everybody is in the habit of bTay.
ging on job; and Job did have con-
siderable pashunce; hut did he ever
keep distrik skulc for S dollars a
month and board around, or run
kountrie noosepaper?
Did lie ever reap lodged oats down