The democrat. [volume] (Weston, W. Va.) 1868-1874, 1871-03-20

time OF trouble is like a broken tooth,
and foot out of joint.
There is no one else who has the pow
er to be so much your friend, or so much
you enemy, as yourself.
Three things are Important if you wish
to keep friends-to give much, to ask
little, and to take-nothing.
Sir Morgan Crofton, an English baro-
net, has been sentenced to imprisonment
for drunken and disorderly conduct.
Never pride yourself on having done
particularly wise thing; it may hereafter
show itself to have been particularly
foolish.
Danbury Conn. is raising apple seeds
for the western market. Eight barrels
were recently shipped to a town in
Missouri.
A couple in Iowa got divorced lately,
but not appreciating the comforts OF
single blessedness were remarked the
next day.
The Obscrrer. "Year Book" gives the
list OF deaths of American clergymen,
1870, with their ages. The average age
is 81 years.
The coal miners Of Great Britain pro-
duced last year 107, 900, 900 tons, worth
e27, 100000 and the furnaces made
100000 tons of pig iron.
Thou canst not joke an enemy into
friend, but thou mayst friend into an
enemy. To be dexterous in danger is a
virtue, butt court dangeris weakness.
An impudent youngster came very
pear getting his ears boxed the other
night at wedding party for wishing the
bride "many happy returns OF the day"
At San Francisco, in the celebration
of the capitulation OF Paris, one of the
banners in the German procession bore
the inscription New dish frog
smothered in sauer kraut."
A Kentucky wedding was interrupted
by young girl, with babe in her arms,
forbidding the bans. The bridegroom,
asked them to excuse him moment,
stepped out and shot his head of.
Col. Whitley of the Secret Service
Division, has captured since May 10,
1869, the enormous sum of $500, 900 in
bogus money, and 100000 worth OF
clesnsed and counterfeit revenue stamps.
They have steam shovel on the Mis-
sissippi Central Railroad which takes
from the solid bank of earth and loads
train OF eighteen dump cars in thirty
nine minutes, carrying about seventy-fve
cubic yards OF dirt
The four editorial associations OF Maine,
Vermont, New Hampshire, and Massa-
chusetts have appointed committees to
arrange for joint meeting OF the New
England press next year, Newport is
suggested as the place OF meeting.
Here's one OF Punch's best things
"Women are said to have stronger at
tachments than men. 1t is evinced in
little things. A man is often attached
to an old hat ; but did you ever know OF
woman having an attachment for an
old bonnet?
Quilp and his wife had bit of con-
tention the other day. II own that you
have more brilliancy than L" said the
woman, "but 1 have the better iudg-
ment." eyes" said Quilp, "your
choice in marrying shows that" Quilp
was informed that he was brute.
A good story is told OF a German shoe
maker in Utica, n. Y, who, having made
pair of boots for q gentleman of
whose financial integrity he had con-
siderable doubt, made the following
reply to him when he called for the ar
ticle "Der poots ish not quite done,
but der bill ish made out.
A man was arrested in Buffalo last
week for stealing barrel of salt. When
arraigned in the court he pleaded desti
tuition. "You couldn't eat SALT" said
the Judge. "Oh, yes, l could, with the
meat intended to steal" This reply
cost him six months. The judge had no
appreciation OF delicate humor.
The new city of Kalama, Oregon,
though but four weeks old, contains five
hundred inhabitants, and boasts of four
dry goods and grocery stores, three res
taurants, carpenter shop, blacksmith
shop, boot and shoe shop, and about
thirty dwellings of various grades, from
a one story frame to q dog tent. No rum
shops are permitted, and not fight has
yet occurred.
A rare animal, beautiful black fox,
was recently trapped by Mr.. H. Edwards
of Lobo. The fox, when trapped made
q gallant effort to escape by attempting
to gnaw off the paw that had been
caught, and succeeded in doing so with
the exception OF small sinew. At this
point bleeding had made her too weak
to struggle longer and the trapper's
hand ended the scene.
Although it was once customary to
call every high peak Of the Rocky Noun
tains $4,000 feet in altitude, but one
shows $1,000 feet on actual measure
ment. There are many Of $4,000 feet.
1t is somewhat remarkable howregularly
this height is preserved. So far as meas
ured, there are twenty peaks above $4,000
and ten about IA, 900 feet above the sea
level.
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