Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1871-12-14

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Mistaken for Washington.
Correspondence of the New York Sun
BIHGHAAToE, LATELY.-A Fulton Mark
ct man found out "What l Know about
Farming this wise:
Said he, "JOhn, do you know the best way
TO raise potatoes?o
Says /, 81 do?''
Says he, show ?'
"Why," says l, "grab hold Of the tops
with both hands and pull EN- up
Says be, ''Go to grass"
So L started to grass, and Pm now on a
trip over the Erie Railway. It's good time
to GO on arailroad. The trees are all disrobed,
and the leaves are through blushing and
turning all colors. What last spring was a
lamblet is now a muttonlet. Green peas
have turned to shot, and so forth.
| MISTAKEN HIS MAN.
The first thing l did after getting into
the cars was to try and make myself agree
able. The attempt proved failure.
saw fellow with package in his hand,
and said to him. 'sHave game Pr
"Game Of what said be.
"Seven up,m said 1.
There isn't SO much bitterness in ton Of
boiled alOes as there was in the expression Of
that fellows face. Intense scorn and malignity
struggled for the mastery as he yelled out.
"No, sir I'm minister"
"Well," said /, ''you needn't get mad.
Nobody ever would believe it unless you
told 'em So"
Then told him on closer inspection he did
look like minister minister penitentiary
and asked him what he was doing with
those cards.
He said they were not cards, they were
blank tickets for the Sunday school library.
Then l said, "What might your name
He said, "Barnes."
Then 1 said with smile, "There are lots
Of barns all over the country, amt there Pr
To this day he has never answered that
question. He moved into another car.
POOR LITTLE BOYS TICKET.
Back of me sat little boy. He had a
half ticket. The conductor punched it. !
said to him. sis that boy obliged to have a
whole ticket to travel on this train ?"
He said "No."
swell" said 1. shes got one
she hain't," said he.
an bet you," said L. sit was half
ticket until you punched it that made 1t a
hole one"
He intimated he would ''puneh me-" so
we didn't continue to converse.
TALK WITH A MILLER.
Imoved over next to fellow who was
devoid of nose. "Ahem," said 1, "case Of
mayhem ?"
aNo," he said, "my dorg chewed it OF
last July"
"Ah!' said l, ''not mayhem, but Julyhem,
eh ?"
"Be you from York ?" said he.
81 am said |.
"Do you know Smth?n said he.
''Smith, said l, "what SMITH?
mo, not Watt Smith, but Mister Smith:
he keeps store down there"
He was surprised when l told him 81
never heard of him."
"Hewer of water and chopper Of grass"
exclaimed, ''what is your biz?''
He said he was miller.
''Gin miller ?" said l.
''No, sir" said he, 81 conduct a well-reg-
ulated, Christian saw MILL"
''Ah," said 1, ''you are a Millerite, then"
Just then l made some further remarks.
observed, ''the country looked fine"
didn't exactly know how the country ought
TO look to look fine, but l hit it right, for
he said, YES" and he said we were pass
ing through a dairy country.
''Do they run trains nights through a
dairy country ?" l asked, s@getly.
He said yes, and said they made mighty
good cheese in that section, Irelated to
him how 81 didn't like mite-y good cheese"
then told him "Truth was mighty and
would prevail, and cheese was mite-y, and |
that was prevailing to considerable extent, !
too"
SLICES FROM A CLUB.
Than va Stpr,raAH for ar,I 7
swear thai | saw a man sell slices sawed of /
policeman's club for Bologna sausage /
sandwiches, and was served with a piece /
of the steak old John Rogers was burned at,
and it was burned ten per cent. worse than /
he was, and tougher than a parboiled pump /
handle on toast. The proprietor asked me /
if had been served? ] told him yes, had 1
been served darned meanly.
When | got into the cars again the Mill
erite observed,' ''the pen is mghtier than
the sword" told him that wasn't the case
with hog pen. Then we communed
about the grass crop. He said he was
much troubled with ground hogs. $50 am
], said [: where | board we are annoyed to
death with 'em all WINTER
Why" said he. "do you have ground
hogs in York 81
eyes," said l, ''lots of EN-; we call EN-
sausages."
For the space Of five minutes he bowed
his head and wept.
MISTAKEN FOR GEORGE WASHINGTON.
As soon as he got through weeping told
him had recently visited New England,
and how prolific everything was up there,
and | observed to him how for miles along
side Of the railroads the telegraph poles had
sprouted and were bearing apples, ounces,
huckleberrles, a1d bananas.
"No!" said he.
eyes" said L.
Then he rose and said, wash, thought
yOu were dead
"My name isn't Wash" said l.
Excuse me, sir" said he. 81 called YOU
Wash because you remind me so strongly
Of George Washington who did it with his
hatchet-the man who never told a lie."
Says l, ''Sir it's lucky you Amt niger ;
4 you were would kill you, sir, and let {
TOur family goa black-burying in Octo-
per-"
Then he went in the next car where the ,
minister went, then the cars stopped five ,
minutes, and had slight alteration with {
a saloon chap. He sold awful small pieces
Of pie for ten cents piece, and | asked
him if he would sell three pieces for quar-
er. He said no.
Says l, by gosh, you do do it,
He swOre he didn't. Then l told him I
le did-that there was three pieces to every !
quarter Of a pie on his counter, and that
vas three pieces for quarter.
He set pure white black-and-tan terrier
It me, but he was so cussed lazy before he
,ould open his mouth to bite, was on
,oard the cars again. I
IN BINGHAMToy. L
But here we are at Binghamton,at which
lace l will rest for the time being. Before
eaving you l will PROFOUND you conun-
rum. Why is railroad traveller like a 9
music teacher? Because he is always deal :
~ with fats and sharps. JOHN. u
Visitors to the YO Semitic D
Travel to the YO Semitic Valley for the e
aaaOO Of STI ia uearlv closed fhouOh a