Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1871-05-19
Genernlities.

-- An exchange wants to know
whethera lover can be called "suit-
or" when "he don't suit hers
John Chinaman being asked tn
take q drink, said, mol Whiskey
make Chinaman one first-rate fool"
The psor heathen Chinea
While settling n woman's estate
at Worcester, the other day, An item
of six dollars was allowed her daugh-
ter for attending the funeral.
- d. a. Mahony wants Dubuque
courty to pay him So 500 for seven
years service In consummating q SET
tlement Of the county indebtedacas.
"A California professor IL writing
essays on the flies nose. A very
ticklish place to write essays, we
should say, though perhaps he
knows 10.
"A Bostonian visiting England
short time ago. was inquired of in
London "lf the Indians in Boston
worshiped at the same churches as
the white residents?"
"A Western man thinks that if as
much attention wac paid to the i'm.
provement of corn as TO grapes, a
hundred million bushels might be
added TO the crop, annually.
IT you ever shonhl have the misfor~
tune to "Iet the cat out of the bag. "
never try to stuff her back again it's
such mistake; you only make, in
evitably make, matters forty times
worse.
-- a gentleman addressing a paR.
sionate love letter TO a lady In the
same town, added this curious post
script: "Please send me a speedy an
swer, as have somebody else In my
eye"
- A case In recently said 10 have
occurred beyond the practice Of the
ordinary occulist. IL IL that of
young lady who, instead Of COM
mon pupil, has Il college student IN
her eye.
The lady who committed suicide
at Stephens Hotel, New York city,
one day last week. is ascertaiued 10
have been the wife Of A. w. Sheldon,
formly connected with the Keokulc
Gate City.
"A Bostonian who did Mount
Washington on foot last year, has In
formed the Transcript that he got as
. ravenous as raven among the ra-
vines, and sat down In one Of the
GORGEOUS gorges aud gorgea himself.
"A bald man made merry by the
expense Of another who covered liis
partial badness with u wig, adding,
as q clincher: "You see how bald ]
am and don't wear wig.n "True." !"
was the retort. "but an empty barn
requires no thatch.n
The Racine Wis Journal heads
one Of It's editorials as follows: rs
the Constitution Constitutional or
Unconstitutional? ? or has the Uneon-
stitutionallty of the Constitution be-
come Constitutional in the Constitu-
tion OF q Democrat.
The average daily circulation of
the Philadelphia Ledger has reached
70, 900 copies, which is larger, we pre-
sumo. than the average Of any other
American news paper. It's advertis,
ing patronage amounts to nearly, or
quite, 100000 per rear.
- A man entered Boston horse
car, the other day, where there was
plenty of room, but no one making
a place for him, lie sat down In tho
middle of the car on the floor. Tho
passengers were quick enough to-
move then, though rather too late To
answer the demands of true poiite>
ness.
- In the Massachusetts, Senate, AN
order has been passed to have the fol-
lowing sentiment, uttered by Gov.
Andrew, engraved on the pedestal of
his statute II know not what record
of sin awaits me In the other world.
but this I do know: That / never
was 80 mean as to despise a man be.
cause he was poor. because was igno-
rant. or because he was black"
II may be of interest to our agri-
cultural readers to know that the Su-
preme Court has recently decided
that railroad companies who have
fenced their roads are not liable for
damages for stock killed by getting
on the track Though breaks la tire
fence. unless IL DO proven that the
company has had due notice Of tie
! condition Of tho fence, aud a reaso;,
! able time to repair II,