Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1871-08-18


consequently for the next two weeks we |
shall shout out for Butler When Mr. |
w. returns, his mild inquiry will probably |
be, Why is this thusY"
HORRIBLE I'm New York a man re-
Gently made wager that he could run a |
closed umbrella down his throat TO the |
handle. No sooner had he accomplished |
this feat than the base wretch with whom |
he made the bet seized the umbrella by |
the handle, and opened 1t all the way |
clinching 1t on the catch. lie then fled |
Of course all efforts to close the umbrella |
and remove 1t have been utterly useless |
and the poor sufferer walks about with his |
person distended in manner that Is mex |
pressibly painful. These practical Jokes |
are very wrong. Just for the sake of
moments amusement, this man is Obliged |
to carry that umbrella with him to his |
grave.
HoRATIo WARD, an American, who re.
Gently died in London, left $40 900 to the
grand daughters of Robert Morris, of
Revolutionary fame. In his will he says
!" IL will, doubtless, surprise them to get
legacy from person they never knew
and perhaps never heard of; therefore 1t
seems but proper they should be informed
that the bequest is made through COM
passion for their misfortunes, and in re.
turn for the kindnesses shown me by
their father when was boy; and il may
be as well that Miss Amelia Morris should
be informed that ii was | who sent some
money to her and her younger sister, un-
der the name of her fathers friend few
years ago"
THE Des Moines Qowa) Register says
About three months ago little Willie Par
0np1 nf
who lives at the foot of Ninth street, got
silver quarter of a dollar stuck in his
throat, and his parents thought he had
swallowed IL. He has, however, lately
been complaining good deal about pain
in his throat, and yesterday Drs. Grimes
and Ullrich, upon being called in to see
him, found that the silver piece still re-
mained in his throat. They at once adopt
ed measures to get it out, and were sue
cessfdl. We saw the piece shortly after
they had taken it out; it was blackened
up and pretty well worn. The wonder is
how it remained in his throat so long
nearly three months-without being dis
covered"
ONE evening as l was sitting beside
Hetty, and had worked myself up to the
point of popping the question, sez l,
"Hetty, if feller was to ask you to marry
him, what would you say ?" Then she
laughed, and SEE she, "That would depend
on who asked me-" Then, sez /, suppose
1t was Ned Willis ?" Sez she, "Pd tell
Ned Willis, but not you" That kinder
staggered me, but | was too cute to lose
the opportunity, and so sez agen, "Sup-
pose it was me ~ And then YOU ought
to see her pout up her lip. Sez she, 81
don't take no supposes" Well, now, you
see, there was nothing for me TO do but tn
touch the trigger and let the gun go off.
So bang it went. Sez /, 'Lor', Hetty, it's
me Won't you say yes p And then
there was such hullabaloo in my head
don't know zactly what TUX place, but
thought heard "Yes" whispered some
where out of the skIimmage.
NOBLE SENTIMENTs.--
He sang the praise of "sming morn"
And 'hailed the rising sun
How sweet" he wrote, ITO rise at dawn !"
de never rose till one.)
OF weo ded love, too, would he sing,
And calm domestic life
Marriage he wrote, 'i- holy thing"
Ole used to beat his Wife,
Beauty he praised all else above,
And much preferred to gold
a youthful ma den's lasting love.
(His wife was rich and old.)
He wrote, "The noblest use of wealth
Is to assist the many,
AM doing Others good by stealth"
lie never gave penny.)
lie wrote, AZ hold that man sot,
And sunk in moral torpor,
Who hOnoreth his parents not"
dis mother died pauper)
against the drunkar i's WIGS cd ways,
Until my latest breath,
a sad reproving voice III raise"
(He drank himself to death.)
AN article on the famine in Persia, in
the New York Herald, has the following:
" The writer was in India in 1868, and wit
messed some of the horrors OF the terrible
famine which prevailed in Ajmere, and
which, according to official statistics,
caused two millions Of deaths. No sight
on earth can be pictured more terrible
than a crowd of miserable creatures fren-
zed by hunger Spectral forms stretch
forth long, thin arms, with the elbow Joint
standing out in bold relief, like huge
ball. and the hands spreading like the
roots of a tree, and demand in shrill &C.
cents the means Of lie. And such eyes
and faces as glare at youl Years hence
they haunt you in dreams like some hid
eous picture of madhouse, or a battle.
field, or an execution. And if you have
courage to calmly examine in all their
minuti9 these revolving forms of misery,
the most callous heart may well turn sick
WIN ulHEuSL1 WHICH IL 5liduBClJ DllHkitN
with terror. In many cases the victim of
starvation takes a peculiar form of fever
the famine fever. His body breaks out in
ulcers from head to foot. and his blood
burns in the tortures of a living fire. Bet.
ter far the quick though Iepulsive hor-
rors OF the plague than the prolonged tor.
ments that hang in the wake of u great
famine"
WHILE standing at his desk in the Office
yesterday morning. the bookkeeper of
the Pacific stock-yards had his attention
directed to the running of the hYdrant
located in an adjoining yard and just by
the door of the office. AS he had but
just turned 1t off he was somewhat sur
prised, but on looking, the water was on
full head Closing it off again, however
he resumed his work, but had hardly
taken his pen when he again heard the
rush of water. He again shut it off but
only to find it turned on a third time by
some mysterious force. Determined to
ascertain the cause, he placed himself in a
position which gave view of the hy-
drant, There were several wild Texan
steers in the inclosure, and one OF these
he presently observed approach the
hydrant, which was turned on and off by
an iron rod with ring handle, and delib-
erately push its nose against the ring,
turning it each time in the right direction,
and carefully continuing the movement
until the water began to flow, when it
ceased and applied itself to quench its
thirst at the gushing stream. After salts
fying itself it stall1ed away without shut
ting the water off-Kiss0tri hepu6Lica7.
DiVIslbllIty Of Matter.
A CURIOUS calculation has been made by
DR.. Thomson, the well-known philoso-