Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1871-08-17
Sa iseeII Lannon's.
Jenkins Goes to a Pic Mic.

Maria Ann recen thy de termined to 60
to picnic.
Maria Ann is my wife-un fortunately.
She had planned it to go it alone, SO far
as I was concerned, Oh that picnic ex-
cursion but when I heard about it,
determined to assist. She pretended she
was very glad, but I don't believe she
was.
1t will do you good to get away from
your work day, poor fellow she said !;
and we shall so much enjoy cool morn
ing ride Oh the cars, and dinner in the
woods,
On the morning of that day, Maria
Ann got up at O'Clock. About three
minutes later she disturbed my slumbers,
and told me to come to breakfast. I told
her I wasn't hungry, but it didn't make
bit of iference, [ had to get up. The
sun was up +; had no idea that the sun
began business go early in the morning,
but there he was.
Now said Maria Ann, We must fy
around, for the cars start at half-past s.
Eat I'll he breakfast you can, for you
won't get anything more before noon.
[ could not eat anything at that time
in the morning, and it was we'll [ could
not, for | had all could dc. There
was ice to be pounded to go around the
pail of ice cream and the sandwiches to
be cut, and | thought I should never get
the legs Of the chickens fixed so that |
could get the cover on the big basket.
Maria Ann few around and piled up
groceries for me to pack, giving diree-
lions to the girl about taking care of the
house, and putting On her dress all III
once. There is deal Of energy in that
woman, perhaps 3 triae too much.
At twenty minutes past 6 l stood on
the front steps with a basket on one arm
and Maria AIMS waterproof On the other.
and pail in each land, and bottle of
vinegar in my coatskirt pocket. There
was camp chair hung on me somewhere,
too, but | forget just where.
Now said Maria Ann. We must run
or we shall not catch the train.
Maria Ann,' said I, that is a reason
able idea. How do you suppose can run
with all this freight?
you must, you brute. You always try
to tease ne. If you do no! want scene
Oh the streets you will start, too
So ran.
/ had one comfort, at least. Maria Ann
fell down and broke her parasol. She
called me brute again because laughed
She drove me all the way to the depot in
brisk trot, and we got on the cars but
neither of us could get seat. and |
could not fine place where [ could set
the things down, so [ stood there and
held them.
Maria l said ia winning accents,
how is this for cool morning ride :?
Said she, You are brute, jenkins.
Said l, My love, you have made that
observation before. ]
| kept my courage up. yet knew there
would be an hour of wrath when we got
home. While we were getting out Of the.
cars the bottle in my pocket got broke,
and consequently l had one boot halffull
of vinegar all day. That kept me pretty
quiet, and Maria Ann ran off with a
bigwhiskered music teacher, and lost her
fan, and got her feet wet, and tore her
dress, and enjoyed herself much after the
fashion Of pic-nicgoers. | thought it
never would come dinner time, and Maria
called me pig because wanted to open
or basket before the rest of the baskets
were opened.
At last dinner-time came-the nice
dinner in the woods, you krow. Over
three thousand little red ants had got into
our dinner, and they were worse to pick
out than fish bones. The ice-cream had
melted and there was no vinegar for the
cold meat except what was in my boot,
and of course that was of no immediate
use. The music teacher spilled cup OF
hot coffee on Maria's head, and pulled all
the frizzles out trying to wipe of the
coffee with his handkerchief. Then sat
on piece of raspberry pie, and spo lied
my white pants. and concluded | didn't
want anything more. l had to stand up
against tree the rest of the afternoon.
The day afforded considerable variety,
compared to everyday life, but there
were so many drawbacks that we dig not
enjoy it SO much as might have done.
49,