Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes Co., O. [Ohio]) 1870-1895, 1871-11-30

AillOilinus ), IuuTSuay evening".
A wag recently appended to the list of
market regulations in Cincinnati; "No
whistling near the sausage stalls.''
The papers quote various instances of
grape vines and apples trees bearing two
crops this season.
Next to the busy bees, boot-blacks
furnish the brightest examples of i'm
proving the shining" hours.
Are your sleighbells and buffalo robes
in good order If not, get them in read
iness. wHf r; r#5fit
Why is the coupling-chain of loco
motive like love? Because it's tender
attachment.
The best way for a man to train up
child i'm the way he should go is to trav-
el that way sometimes himself.
The following is an old sailors direc-
ton to a dentist, "'Tis the aftermost
grinder aloft oil the starboard quarter"
Why are Cashmere shawls like people
who are totally deaf? Because you can
not make them here.
The sting of a bee carries conviction
with it. 1t makes a man a bee-leaver
at once. -
Too polite to interfere with the slum-
bers of adjacent bears, Michigan hun
ter recently remained in a tree all night.
An old bachelor suggests that births
be announced under the head of "new-
music"
An item in lawyers bill to his client
ran thus: To lying awake at night
thinking over your ease, $45. -
What is that which he who has it not
does not wish for, but he who has it
would not part with for any money
A bald head.
A smile may be bright while the heart
is sad-the rainbow is beautiful in the
air while beneath is the moaning of the
sea.
Orange Blossoms; Fresh and Faded,'
is the name of one of the most inter-
esting books of the season, by I. 5. Ar
thur. 1t is full of instruction.
Josh Billings says: Courage without
discretion is like ram with horns on
both ends-he will have more fights on
hand than he can do justice to.
A sick man was told that his wife
would probably marry again. "All
right" said he, ''there will be one man
to lament my death.''
1t is said that green tarlatan dress
contains arsenic enough to kill man,
and yet men do not seem to go near green
tarlatan dresses.
An Illinois burglar slid down CHM
ney to get into store, but as the fire
place had been walled up he did not get
out until the occupants helped him.
Some one truly says, the best way to
train up child in the way he should
go, is to travel that way himself some
times.
When a married man is seen with his
face scratched all over, he excuses him
self by saying that he was play ing with
the cat.
Five per cent, of the estates of un-
married persons goes to the State at their
decease. Moral-get married, and thus
cheat the State out of that five per cent.
Turkey gobblers have been wearing
long faces for several days past, but the
danger is now nearly over, and their
countenances are Frightening up again.
When the bills for subscription are
made out they will be sent to the differ
ent POst-masters who will be authorized
to collect the same.
aC-c-can that p-p-pup-parro t-ter
talk 2, asked suffering man of an
italian. "Suppose he no can talk so
much better rs that what you talk, l
chop he head off, was the reply.
SLOW did you learn that graceful at
titude 2" said gentleman to fellow
leaning in maudlin fashion against a
post. Il have been practicing at glass;"
was the reply.
A correspondent of the New York
Commercial speaks of church on Fifth
avenue where they have "four eXpen-
sive brass angels outside and a good
many expensive angels inside.
a An exchange says that Andrew john
sons daughter, Mrs. Patterson, who
used to preside at the White House, has
just taken the premium for the best but
ter at county fair held in Tennessee.
Our ex-devil declares that the Akron
Germania has a continued story, at least
it looks so to him at side glance, but
does not know where the local is. He
"beesh not deichman.''
The parOXysm of coughing may Of
ten be prevented or cured by using a
little dry salt as n gargle. Let those
who doubt try it. 1t will relieve the
throat.
CoshOcton gains in population over
eighty i'm the operatives and managers
of the Iron and Steel works. Such are
the results of manufacturing establish
ments. At least $1,000 more yearly will
circulate in the town among business
men.
Some people act as though they were
raised in houses without doors. They
go out and in business houses, the post
office, hotels, &C., without ever think
ing of shutting the door after them on
a cold day. Such carelessness is unpar-
donablc. If the door should be open
when they enter-left open by some
careless one in passing in or out-that is
no reason why they should not shut it
! after them.