The States and Union. [volume] (Ashland, Ohio) 1868-1872, 1871-03-08
-BREvITfEEs

A new cattle disease has broken oui
in Indiana It is incurabIe.
A farmer in Illinois, has O cow thai
presented him with four calves at one
time.
Central Illinois has recently been
visited by terrific wind storms and
rains doing much damage.
Why is the Indiana Legislature
like a good christian Because they
are resigned.
Why are Presidents like vagaboudsi
Because they are associated with vices.
Very true.
A bachelor exclaimed, "'This world
is a gloomy prison." TO those IN
solitary confinement" added a witty
young lady.
Minister Thornton. has been din
ing the Joint High Commission in 1.-The
City of Washington.
Henry d. Cook. has accepted the
appointment of Governor of the Dis
trict of Columbia.
Speaker Mack, and eleven Demo
cratic members of the Indiana Legis-
lature have been visiting Columbus
A supposed Indian burial ground
containing many skeletons, has just
been discovered near Evansville. -
A muskrat made q hole through the
dam of a Wisconsin farmers trout
pond and thirteen hundrea trout esca-
ped thereffom.
While King William is about tc
take the imperial PURPLE Bonaparte
ia under the imperial ''blues."1
Schenck, fears sea sickness. He
might relieve all his fears by throwing
up his commission.
Will itwash7 Why is laundres:
like an insult? Because she gets n
your collar.
A respectable lady of Pittsburg,. thu
other da1.1was pumped for poison and
yielded2an overdose of brandy.
Mrs. Mhlloy, is to lecture on the
s1liect Of "Marriage." She is not
the girl that Pat went home to marry,
but her cousin.
An Ohio paper called SIsanB An
tbony a "Century plant" When
she read II, what revolutionary Gen.
eral did she resemble? Why, '"Mad
Anthony" Of course.
What is the difference between an
Esquimaux dinner and Paris shop
girl? Why, one is eat grease, and
the otheri is g~ris-ette
A brutal husband in San Francisco
got up a matrimonial quarrel because
his wife pounded him over the head
with a stick Of stove wood.
Crude carbolic acid is nov credited
with embalming the late Pharaoh
of Egypt and other talented lnummies.
WouIdn'ta little of that fluid be an
excellent thing for our "gift enterprise
at Washington"
The Hartford Times thinks that if
Grant is to be reelected it would be
a splendid speculation for the country
to increase his salary to 100000 a
year, and turn in the Prerequisites to the
Treasury.
A New Hampshire youth let aden-
fist pull all his teeth aud iusert -artifi-
cial ones. He said he had the money
to spare, and he knew the --darned
things wonld ache and had to be pull
ed some time.
The health of Chief Justice Chase
remains substantially unchanged, and
his friends take hope that he is better.
His youngest daughter, Nettie, will
be married in March to a son of Ed
win Hoyt, of the Sprague and Hoyt
of New York, and an extended bridal
tour to Europe is planned. It is also
proposed that the Chief Justice shall
follow them to Europe after a brief
interval, and spend some time there
in the hope OF beneficial results to the
complete restoration of his health.
The visitors at the house of the
late Mr. Seaton, of the National Intel
ligencer. included all the leading per
senages of the day, and even John
was softened by the accom-
plishments of Mrs. Seaton. Mr.. Ran
dolph sat near Mr.. Seaton, and on
one occasion when Mr.. Clay, speak
ing in his not unusual personal and
selesuficient strain, said, among 9th
er things, that Ibis parents had left
him nothing but indigencv and igno-
rance" Randolph, turning to MIR
Seaton, said, in a stage whisper to be
heard by the company: 1.-THE gentle
man might continue the ALTERATION,
and add insolence.'
A gentleman of Halifax, at a ladies'
fair not long since, and being asked
to buy something by a fair creature
who kept one of the tables, said he
wanted to buy what he feared was not
Tor sale-a lock of her hair. To his
surprise and delight she promptly cut
offthe coveted curl, and received the
price offered, SO. The happy pur-
chaser vas exhibiting the trophy to
one of his friends, who very suddenly
blasted his joy by saying: "She
rather outfanked you, for to nv Ger
tain knowledge she only paid three