The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1871-08-24
FACTS AND FANolEs.
A good side shov--A pretty cheek.
Irredcemable bonds -vagabonds.

Tho latest thing out--Lovers. these
moonlight nights.
Some tailors would make capital drag.
OOns, they charge so.
A bad hat taken 10 an evening party
frequently comes out US good as new.
"Women in arms" We'll, where should
they be?
Safeguard against lts---Deal at slop
shop.
A good rule; back your friends and face
your enemies.
Starch and flour arc made from horse
chestnuts in France.
One ought to have dates on ones fingers
ends, seeing they grow on tho palm.
A Minnesota juror addressed notc to
tho judge, in which ho styled him as
"0ucrablc Jug"
"a school.boy's aspiration" "0h.
how | wish were fountain, for then /
could always be playing"
Why are types like criminals2 Because
it is not proper 10 lock them up without
proof
The provorb that stolen kisses aro sweet
is enforced by the fact, that they generally
como from lasses.
A man writes to soy be only backed one
horse in bis life, aud that was into q shop
window.
A bad marriage is like IN electric mo.
chine; it makes you dance, but you cant
lot 60.
Why is your chambormaid immortsl9--
Because she returns TO dust every day
without dying.
II Missouri boarders "blow up" tue
landlady, she retaliatA BY quitting tor.
pedoes in their hash.
IA baby'whckhssssh 1iuna aghn..
his father, may be said to be partial TO bis
ma and martial to bis pa.
A colored jury at Brandon, Texas, re.
Gently sentenced another colored man to
"be hung BY the head until be gets dead"
The Columbus, Ohio, papers don't have
any editorials now, The alleged cause being
that "the thermometer is up to three shirt
collars minute"
The fashions all come from Berlin this
year, and as they are very practical, sem
sible people, we may look forward to styles
that are pretty as well as comfortable.
poor.pay debtors in Canada arc writing
complaints to the papers that their remor-
seless creditors send them duns on open
postal cards, which all who care may read.
The annual report Of an educational in
stitution in an Eastern State mentions the
Resignation Of one Of tho teachers, q young
lady, to "eneago in domestic relations"
The New York markets have disposed
Of about 5000 head Of cattle per week
during the past year, making over $4,000
beeves per annunl.
A girl at Peru writes to male acquain-
tance: "Come over and see me, I'VE have
a new lamp at our house that we can turn
down, down, down, until their is scarcely
a bit Of light iu the ROOM"
A dress, composed entirely Of the most
delicate white lace, lOoped up with pearls,
enveioped a Philadelphia belle at Cape
May recently, and distracted all behold
ers.
The horn of Patagouian OK has been
forwarded to Baltimore. 1t is sixty-6ve
inches long, seventeen inches 10 circum.
ference at the base, and will hold seven
quarts.
An English farmer condensed his praot.
cial experience into this rule: "Feed your
land before it is hungry, rest it before it is
weary, and weed it before it is foul.
Tho largest rope in the world has been
completed in Birmingham, England. II
is about six miles long, Eve and quarter
inches in circumference, and weighs over
sixty tons.