The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1871-05-11

Cpll6 anu SEE en- HIKE paper col
lars! Don't she know her biz, eh,
BiH?'
bachelors" says Josh Billings,
fare always a braggin' ov their free
dom! Freedom to darn their own
stockings and poultice their own
shins! I had rather be a widower
once in two years regular than tew
be grunting, old, hair dyed bache-
lor only ninty-nine days"
a young lady said: sWhen I go
to the theatre I am very careless of
my dress, as the audience are too
attentive to the play to observe my
wardrobe; but when I 60 to church
I am very particular in my outward
appearance, as most people go there
to see how their neighbors dress
and deport themselves"
A Springfield lady left her little
boy at home to amuse himself with
matches and when she returned met
him in the street crying. He said
he only made little fire in the bu-
reau drawer, and lot Of red-shirt
men with a great big tea-kettle
came and squirted water over the
house. They saved the cellar door.
A child, while walking through
an art gallery with her mother, was
attracted by q statue of Minerva
''Who is that?' said she. "My
child, that is Minerva, the Goddess
of Wisdom" "Why didn't they
make her husband, toogo "Be-
cause she had none, my chfld.''-
''That was because she was wise,
wasn't it, mammaY' was the artless
reply.
The girls in Cincinnati have as
sociated themselves into a society
having for its object the investiga-
tion Of the anteeedents of the wife
hunters. Any girl having an softer"
may apply to the society and in less
than a week she will receive a his
tory of her lover, from his youth
upward. Weddings are likely to
be scarce hereafter IN CINCINNATI.
It Will be remembered that a girl
in California had her neck broken
not long since in the insane attemI
to prevent a young man. from kiss
ing her, and now here is another
case of the same kind from st. Lou
is, where a young girl has been
brought to an untimely end, bring
ing sorrow upon her aged parents
by the same kind Of stubboTnness.
If this proves a warning to future
girls not to their lives needlessly, by
resisting, our mission is fulfilled.
"JUsr so."-A patron of cer
tain newspaper once said to the
publisher:
"Mr. Printer, how is it you have
never called ON me for pay for your
paper?'
"Oh," said the typo, "we never
ask a gentleman for money"
Indeed! How do you manage to
get along when they don't payY
why said the editor, "after a
certain time we conclude he is no
gentleman and we ask him.
"oh-ah-yes-I see. Mr.. Edi-
tor, please give me receipt" hand
ing him V, "and make my name
all right on your books"
Cen. Forrest has been reelected
President of the Selma, Marion and
Memphis Railroad. The Selma
Times is responsible for the follow
ing
A few days ago a gentleman who.
was opposed to the enterprise was
eonversing with an old lady in re-
lation to it and was using every ar
gument in his power to convince
the old lady that his position was
correct, but to no purpose. She
freed him upon every point. "Wel's'
said the gentleman, ~there is one
thing you must admit, and that is
that Forrest is no christian and can
not 90 to heaven" The old lady
paused a moment and replied -
seyyelI. he may not be a christian;
but, sir, If he once sets his head
upon heaven, all hell cant keep him
back"