The States and Union. [volume] (Ashland, Ohio) 1868-1872, 1871-06-14
Seleft spnetrp.
BETSEY AND ! ARE OUT.
BY W N. CARLETON.
Farm Ballad.


Draw up the papers, Lawyers, ant
make 'em good and stout,
For things at home are cross-ways. anG
Betsey and 1 are out
We who have worked together so long
as man and wife,
Must pull in single harness the rest Of
our nat'ral life.
"What is the matter?' say you, swan
it's hard to tell;
Most of the years behind us we've
i. passed by very well
l have no other woman-she has nc
! other man, ....-
Only we've lived together as long as
we ever can.
So l have talked with Betsey, and Bet
scy has talked with me; ..
So we've agreed together that we can't
meyer agree;
Not that we've catched each other in
any terrible crime;
We've been gatherin' this for years, a
little at q time.
There was a stock of temper we both
had, for n start;
Althoug gh we never suspected 'twould
take us two apart;
I had my various failings bred in the
flesh and hone,
And Betsey, like all good women, had
temper of her own.
!
The first thing that 1 remember where
in we disagreed,
Was somethin' concerning heaven-a
difference, in our creed.
! We arg'ed the thing at breakfast-we
arg'ed the thing at tea ja
And the more we arg'ed the question,
the more we didn't agree.
And the next l remember was when
we lost COW; .-....s-
She had kicked the bucket certain
the question was only-how?
l held my own opinion, and Bctsey
another had;
And when we were done q talkin' we
both of US was mad.
And the next that 1 remember, it
started in joke,
But full for week it lasted, and nei-
ther of us spoke;
And the next was when ] scolded be-
cause she broke bowl!
And she said ! was mean and stingy,
and hadn't any soul.
And so that bowl kept pourin' dissen-
sion in our cup;
And SO that blamed coT-critter was
always a comm up;
And so that heaven we arg'ed no near
er to US got;
But itsgave us taste of som ethin' a
thousand times as hot.
And so the thing kept workin' and sll
the selfsame way,
Always somethin' to arg'e, and some
thin sharp to say,
And down on US come the neighbors,
n couple dozen strong,
And lent their kindest service for to
help the thing along.
And there has been days together
and many weary week
We was both of US cross and spunky,
and both too proud to speak,
And I have been thinkin' and thinkin,
the whole of the winter and fall,
If can't live kind with woman, why
then won't at all.
And so have talked with I3etsey, and
Betscy has talked with me,
And we have agreed together that we
can never agree; .-r
And what is hers shall be hers, and
what is mine shall be mine;
And I'll put it in the agreement, and
take it 10 her to sign. .'-
Write on the paper; Iawyer--the very
first paragraph.
OF all the farm and live stock, that
she shall have her half : ~
For she has helped to earn. it, through
many weary day, fs
Andsi IFS. nothing more than justice
that Betsey has her pay.
49, So : = zzs,-
Give her the house and homestead,
man can thrive and roam,
But women are .skeery critters, unless
they hayea home.
AndI have always Determined, and
never faited to,say,
That Betsy never should want home
il | was taken away.
There is little hard money that's
DRAWN toierable pay,
A couple Of hundred dollars laid by
for rainy day, -
Safeir the hands Of good men, and
easy to get at;
Put in another clause, there, and give
her half of that.
Yes, 1 see you smile, sir, at my givin'
her so much; .-... =. -
Yes, divorce is cheap, sir, butI take !
no stock in such. - /
True and fair 1 married her, when she
was blithe and young;
And Betsey was always good to me,
excepting with her tongue.
Once, when I was young as you, and
not so smart, perhaps,
For me she mittened q lawyer, and
several other chaps;
And all of 'em was fustered and fair
ly taken down,
And l for time was counted the luck
lest man in town. ts.11 IT, !
Once when 1 had fever-I won't for:
get it soon