The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1871-11-25
HOME MATTERa
Pepper Salt ana Spice.

Pepper, Salt ana x,,.
About the most absurd NJ an
proceedings that have ever proceeded n.o..as.s
one night lately in this city. A youar ~l.vs,.
ick." who works in the starch f.s.o,v 900.
notion to 60 on lark with the "bvs." and .o.,
got 30 completely "mulvatheredn that h. cou,a
neither stand nor see. And 80 the ..bv." tbon.h.
the best thing they could do WA 70 al. e.
"da-cent.lee." So they carried him y, 60
down to saloon on Main street. "ana LA -
on bed" and they put FIVE or six or ,eve, =.
eight candles at his feet, and d-lte tnevI
no. nor sorry the haar care, how usnv NOV.
around his head; and so he soundly slent in .
winding sheet, with -four on his face to olive h;-,
gha'tly look, and thus, In sort of q manuals,
s'upor' he lay till one o'clock. And the bottle
having been going around freely all this time n.
"bys' were shouting. singing, yelling, dancing.
and making the blamedest '.nize :" and then Tia
corpse woke up, and scrubbng opsn his eyes.
in hoarse and husky voice, he said: "Bv.i
when stitch Elegant stuff AZ that ia in cirkel.ton
de We think I'm stitch dern fool Is to b dead p
" For he was fine young, dsacsut giutlemsn-
by Of the rasl ould sthock N. Thom.. and
Jeremiah, when taken separately, are clever fel.
lows, but when you unite them-mix than and
call them Tom and Jerry, and take too much
stock in them. then look out .. Billiard. n.
down to fifteen cents game. Who'll lend ma a
fifteen F....John Frost's mosquitoes we're Ayine
about Tuesday aud Wednesday last W. MA
young lady tother morning, and tears were
splsshing out of her beautiful eyes and running
down her rosy cheeks. Wherefore, Reutle
maiden, dost thou weep" we asked. She An.
swered, "Oh, 1hain't crying its only the cold
that makes my eyes act co." All this time We
knew she was "fibbing." She had just parted
from her beau. who had torn himself from her
to 60 sway.a.a out in tie eountry-a mile or 10!
We suppress the names Of the parties On account
OF their parsnts ....J. L. Piergus claims the
honor OF getting up the frat Tom and Jerry in
this town this season -. Some time ago dis.
tnguished Ottawa drug-ger took notion to
leave our settlement aud locate at Denver, Col.
lie accordingly sold out bis real estate, packed
up his peasonal traps and left. Among the Lat.
ter were such useful things IS horses, boot.acks,
COWS, lemon squeezers, calves, tame ducks, Web
ssers dictionary abridged-pictoriAl, geese,
a ma,eria medics, and some chickens and pigs.
These numerous articles were safely stswed
away in y box car, and he undertook TO super
intend the same and attend to his stock and
poultry. be writes back rather doleful letter.
The horses soon became spawned and ringboned,
with symptoms Of glanders; the cows were A.
tackled with hollow horn the cAlve. bleatsd
continually tho geese never ceased to squall,
except 1t grub time; and the chickens for the
first icw days we're msrvelously hungry. His
occupation hour after hour was to ri. aud shell
corn for the chickens, geese aud ducks. aud still
they were 20 hungry that Whenever Le attempt.
ed to climb over the coop to feed the W., horses
would grab him by the Goa. tail and ssuall and
cackle for more feed Then some disease broke
on: in the poultry establishment, and every few
minutes he would have TO throw out dead
duck, goose, gander or chicken to the wolves.
He scattered poultry AL along the railroad track,
clear scro-s the plains: and the wolves getting
posted on his manseuver., organized process.
sion and folio wed the train for several days! He
arrived u, his destination sale, but not fowl
loft; and ne wrote US this letter with tears in
his eyes. to say nothing of quid of tobacco in
his mouth -. Beemus has pair Of boots made
from the hide Of the Identical liya:or that de.
voured Robinson's B.ctrisn Camel Ia the swamps
OF FlGridA--No IS, both ways.