The Hawaiian gazette., 1871-05-17
Mark Twain's First Experience in
journalism.

an unusually smart child thought Al tue ult
1t was then that 1 did my first newspaper scrib
bling. and. most unexpectedly to ne. 1t stirred q
= fne sensation il tAs community. 1t did
indeed, and I vas very proud Of it, too.
l was printers devil, T ard a progressive ans
aspiring ore Ny uncle had ne on his pape
THE Weekly Hannibal .I5,grll.-S2 year ii
advance, 500 subscribers. and they paid in cord
wood. cabbages, and unuarketable turnipsl ant
On : lucky Summers day be LEFT town to b,
/ gore week. and asked me If thought could
edit one Issue Of the paper jaiieiously. Al
didn't 1 want to try Hinton was the editor q
the rival paper. He had lately been jiitsd, and
oae night friend found an open note on the
/ poor fellows bed. IL which be stated be could no
longer endure Life, ard had drOwOed himself in
Bear Greek. The friend ran down there and
I discovered Hinton wading back to shore He
had concluded be wouldn't. The village was full
Of i: for several days. bat Hinton did not suspect
l. thought this WAS \ fine opportunity.
wrote an deliberately wrstched account Of the
whole matter. and then illustrated it with VII
lliuOus cuts engraved on the bottom Of wooden
type with 4 jlek-kaiie-oae Of them, picture Of
Hinton wadi1g out into the creek IN his shirt
with lantern. sounding the depth OF the water
with , WalSiug-stick ! thought it was des-
psratsly funny, sad vas deusely unconscious
that there vas any moral Oblquily about such
publication. Being satisfied with this effort.
looked abgat FOR other worlds to eoaquer, and it
struck NE that i, w0elj make good, interesting
matter 70 charge the editor OF neiEhb0rinr
country paper With piece Of gratuit0us rascaity,
ard see bin squiru7 I did it. putting the
article into the form Of i parody OF the Burial
Of Sir John Moore, and pretty crude parody
It vas, too. Then I lampoouad two prOminet
citizens ogtrageoGSly-uot because they had doue
anything to deserve it. bat merely because
thought it was ny duty TO make the paper lively.
Next, ! gently touched pP The newest stranger
the hon Of the DAY. the gorgeous j0urueymau
tailor from Quincy. he was q sinpsrtug eoxcomb
Of the first water, and the I01dest dressed
nan in the State. He was an inversate woman
killer. Every week be wrote lgzby poetry
for the J5lgH1! about bis newest couq1est His
rhymes for nv week we're beaded Mary in
IL meaning Mary IN Hannibal Of
course But while setting Up the piece l was
suddenly riven from head to heel by what re-
zarIsd As perfect thuaderbol. Of hguor. and
compressed 1t into saar9y foot-uote a, the
bottom. thus e We VIII let this thing pass Just
his once, bat We wish J. GorLou Ruuue-s to
understand distinctly that we have 4 character
% sustain, and from this time forth. when be
rants TO e0mmuue with his friends in HI. be
must select some other medium than the columns
4 this Journal
The paper came ort. and never knew any
title thing 20 attract 50 much attention As those
laytll tribes Of niue. For once the Hannibal
T5,gu1l vas in dzmaad-a novelty it had not
zperizuced before The whole town was stirred. (
linton dropped 10 With d1uble-barrslsd SHOT .
IN early liz the forenoon. When be found it I
as an infant ,as be called me- that had done
i'm the damage, be simply pulled ny ears and
tent away bat be threw up his situation that
igbt and left the town fJr good. The tailor
lme ia with goose and pair Of shears; bat he
sspised ne, too, AID departed for the South
lat night The two amPooaed citizens came
It'll threats Of EbeIs and went away inceused At
y ilsiguifcance. The country editor prarced
with Ear-vhoop next day. suffering for blood
, drink; bat be ended By f9rgfyIng ne cordially
ID inviting ne down 80 the drugstore to wash
way al auiu0sity ia ! friendly bumper Of
Fahaestock's Yermiigge.- It was little Joke
Ny uncle was very angry when be got back
reasonably 80, th51ght, considering what an
lpe;uz had giTea the paper, and considering
50 that gratitude f5r his preservation ought to
I've been upPeru0st in his mind. f1asm1ch as
/ bis delay be had 20 wonderfully escaped dissec-
%, ton.harkiag. Eoel. and getting his head
0t Of But Be s0ftsued when be looked at
e accounts and saw that had actually booked
e unparalleled uamber Of thirty-tHrse new SUB
ribers, and had the vegetables to show for it,
rd-wood. ca55l-es. beans, and unsuitable
ruiPs enough to raa the family Tor Two yearsl
4 SECOND WAsE1ysrJy.-Nasby SAYS: I CON
sneed being good at . very early age, and built
Tseif Up to the best models. l was yet an IN
1t vhea read the affecting story Of the hack
: down Of the cherry tree BY George Washing
D. and the manly statement to bis father that
could 10s tella lie I read the story, and 1t
ed me with desire to sgrpass him I was
{ going TO allow any such boy IS George Wash
-.0u, If be did aftsrWard get TO be President,
excel ne il the morlLtiss. Immediately I . D
zed az axe and cut down the most valuable
err! tree NJ lthsf had; and mere, I dug up
roots and 5arTisd tie branches. 50 that By no
ans could the VARIETY be produced, and went -,
Iiiug one Sunday, that might confess the 7
o hllss and be Eept over AID forgiven on ae-
INT Of ny extreme trathfalue=s- The expert
uts. I regret. we're partial failures I vas >
Y mach Ike George Washington. but the /.
able was. ny fltaer didn't resemble George q.
lshingtoa-s father, which WIS essential to the =
cess Of ny scheme Did y0a cut down that
srry tree r asked be. Father, 1 cannot tell a
dad Il With NJ little Ratchet. answered !
king the proper attitude for the Old gentleman J,
shed tears on me- Bat he diiut shed. He il
lars=d that be had rather had told ! thoas- ~
les than 70 have CIT down that particular P
e and be whipped ne until vas ia state Of Z
.=perated rzEuezs- Ny skating idea vas 10
failure broke through the ice that san n