Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1871-01-07
RooT1sT1cAL CONVERSATION.

own Virtues anu iaulCs, llkes ahu
dislikes, hopes and fears, successes and
failures, doubts and uncertalnties-k
naturally q most engrossing theme,
and one occupying a large share Of
nearly every persons thoughts. But
how far Il Il wise to Introduce 1t as a
topic of general conversation, Is a
problem which greatly affects social
enjoyment, and n which all who de-
sire to confer pleasure by their society
will do we'll to examine. There are
times when personal affairs are the
most fitting themes for discussion
when freely and naturally to commu-
nicate to another what lies nearest to
ones own heart and interests will
awaken a sympathy and cement a
friendship that could not we'll be
spared. The man who never unbosoms
himself to any one, who shuts himself
and all his intimate concerns away
from the sympathy Of mankind, may
be surrounded by acquaintance, but
will never have a friend, and must be
content to lose some Of the most natu-
raj and p~lea,urable passages Of life.
This mutual and sympathetic conf
dsnce between congenial and faithful
friends Is something wholly different
from the habit, so common with many,
Of constantly Introducing themselves
or their families, their outside Interests
or their inner feelings, in conversation
with those who cannot be supposed to
entertain any special interest in such
matters. There are some whose whole
object In their social Intercourse seems
to be selt-display. Every topic started
reminds them Of some passage in their
own lives, which they hasten to repeat;
they are ready to give to all who will
listen the history Of their daring ex-
PLOTS, their bold strokes Of business,
their successful ~speculations, their I'M
lucky failures; even to confess their
peculiar temptations and weaknesses,
or to recount their special tastes and
preferences. When from any reason
they are deprived Of the power Of thus
exhibiting themselves, they are vacant.
duh and ~uninterested. Society to them
Is only desirable rs It affords an oppor-
tunity to imprint themselves upon 1t.
The extreme exhibition Of this ego
tism Il so unwelcome that society her
self puts a check upon 1t, and those
who yield unreservedly to its indul-
genee are sometimes forced into self
restraint by rough though wholesome
lessons; yet there are few Of us who can
claim entire freedom from its entice-
msnts, and many who have learned In
some degree to subdue the inclination
to talk Of themselves, still fail to realize
the vital interest in other subjects,
which alone can develop the true value
Of conversation. Every II who min
giles In society has the double privilege
of receiving and comforting pleasure.
Both these objects are frustrated by
love Of dwelling too much upon self.
The subject Is one which forbids the
free Interchange Of thought. Indeed.
nothing can DO done but to listen re-
luctantly TO one who persistently talks
Of himself. Politeness enforces the
concealment of'candid opinion, while
lie chains down both his own and his
hearers Intelligence to the level OF his
personality. All this dulls the
brightness and deadens the vivacity
that should inspire social life, as this
self-assertion, and the annoyance it
creates is rs displeasing as its intrinsic
insipidity. 1t mag we'll be doubted
whether 1t is to the advantage Of any
one 10 thus expose himself to the gaze
Of others by unwittingly exhibiting
faults. Few characters can be laid
bare without displaying many flaws,
and the habitual self-asserters are ever
mconsciously showing their own def
ciencies. A better appreciation of the
value Of conversation should induce
them to keep o in the shade when
enjoying social intercourse. Every
thing which tends to destroy its free
dom, or to fetter It to a single tedious
topic, must impair its excellence, and
this Is sure to follow the obtrusion Of
selfish Interest. a want Of sympathy
with others lies n much at the root Of
this evil as excessive egotism. Those
who do rs they would be done by, and
who accord to others the same kind at
tentlon and respect that they crave for
themselves v offend society by the
unseemly obtrusion Of their own af-
fairs.
GRACE GREENWOOD writes fron Washington
that senator Nye looks like Benjamin Franklin.
-ErcAno0r