The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1871-11-14
CLIPTOGRAMS.

to it, by becoming subject of thought
or inquiry. Books, regarded merely
as qualification, are worth more than
all the luxuries on earth. A taste for
literature secures cheerful occupation
for the unemployed and languid hours
of life, and how many persons in these
hours, for want of innocent resources,
are now impelled to coarse pleasure
How many young men can be found
who, unaccustomed to find compan-
ion in book. and strangers to intel
lectual activity, are almost driven, in
the long, dull evenings of winter, to
haunts of intemperance and depraving
society!
1T a poor rule that won't work
both ways. A Georgia negro thought
he would economize by sending his son
to school and then make the boy teach
him. The plan worked we'll until the
young teacher, following the custom of
the seminary where he was taught,
gave the old man thrashing for SPELL
ing dog d-o-r-g, and then the latter be-
came disgusted and ran away.
The Rev. Misses Clampit an eccen-
trio preacher, held forth at Santa
Clara Valley a young man rose to go
out, when the preacher said young
man, il you'd rather go to perdition
than hear me preach, you may" The
sinner stopped, and reflected mo-
ment, and then saying, swell, / be-
lieve / would went off.
An Irish glazer was putting pane
of glsss into a window, when groom,
who was standing by, joking him, to
mind and put in plenty of putty. The
Irishman bore the banter for some
time, but at last silenced his tormen-
tor by, "Arah now, be off wild ye, or
else I'll put pain in yer head without
any putty"
A Connecticut democrat sent his son
to New York to complete his educa-
ton. After short time the son wrote
to his father that he was studying Hor-
ace. On learning this the paternal
parent replied, "Come, home; / don't
want Greeley to make republican oi
my son." M
A poetical Vermonter presents his
views of the season in this fashion
"We know that Autumn is here. from
the fact that the swallow syndicates
discuss the question when to homeward
fly, and the yellow pumpkins now dot
the rural landscape like golden nut.
megs on the sands of Ophir."
When the telegraph informed u;
that Maggie Mitchell had reproduced
herself" we understood it; but the an,
nouncement that Victor Hugo is pleu
raj" is just little too much, If they
go on improving the English language
in this way we shall soon be in pretty
fix.
Happy bridegroom-"More money
madam more money! Have you for.
gotten that my money has bought ev
cry thing you possess-the very dress
you stand in p "Fair bride-"No sir
Nor have forgotten that your money
has bought what stands in it'll"
A minister made an interminable
call upon lady of his acquaintance,
Her little daughter, who was present,
grew very weary of his conversation,
and at last whispered in an audible key,
"didn't he bring his amen with him,
mamma ?"
Like morning dream life becomes
more and more bright the longer we
live, and the reason of everything be-
comes more clear. What has puzzled
us before seems less mysterious, and
the crooked paths look straighter as
we approach the end.
An old Dutchman who was some
years ago elected member of the leg
islature, said, in broken style: "Ven l
vent to the lechislature / fought /
fought l would find dem all Solomohs
dare; but | soon found dat dare vas
some as pig fools dare as ! vas"
The following certificate lately ap.
peared in the morning police news of
a country paper ;--u certify that Geo.
Roberts is rendered quite incapable of
following his occupation from effects
of severe blow on the nose of seri-
Gus nature.
$50 you are going to keep a
school, said one young lady to another.
well for nv part, sooner than do
that, ] would marry a widower with
nine childrep." II should prefer that
myself" was the quiet reply; "but
where is the widower? ?"
"Mr. Speaker" said a member Of
the Jamaica Legislature, discussing a
bill for the regulation of the timber
trade, 81 know these merchants to be
the most egregious rascals-I was in
the sinber line myself twelve years
Mrs. Partington, m an illustration
of the proverb, "A soft answer turneth
away wrath" says that it is better to
speak paragorically of a person than Il
be all the time flinging epitaphs al
him.
A paper says, in an obituary notice
that "the deceased had been for sever
al years director Of bank notwith
standing which he died a Christian