The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1871-04-29
VARIETY.

T. autb ever rude to Boaz?-Oh, yes when
e..sd his ears, and trOd on hIs corn.
Ear pho sat upon a paper of carpet nails
fhey Esminded lin painfully of the income
N5 tssr, it is very wrong for young people
.hrow Kisses" :. Why, mamma, they don't
! e thss do hit"
Bs jzbersl'' says Pat, who was born on the
fa1 b the year, had L delayed a bit,
10 uo1Id 1 been?''
4bs9 yawned bachelor, '' this world is
. zloomy prison - To those in solitary
leensnr. added a witty young lady.
hat woman was philosopher who, when she
her hlsband, said she mad one great consola-
E-sho knew where he was o nights!
western paper has an article On - The care
Aoss-n \ contemporary says that paper is
avs draggiug family affairs before the public.
Ierman citizens desiring to enter France are
'pernitted to do 50, tue reasons given being
8 ihs FfCaS.. Government is unable to protect
s1Iemina, said precocious little boy, who,
linst hls will, was made to rUck the cradle,
thc Lord has any more babies to give away.
1't zp1 take en-"
c5npauion to the song, &. Oh, give me back
t5s4tsfday," is sOOn to be issued. 1t is to be
s1 = Oh, could you spare Tomorrow. This
seon be followed by - You haven't got such
N1gss next week about you, have your"
.sstimOnial to the skill of a chiropodist. pub
s. ~ an English paper, testihes that - four
- <tprs ago he successfully extracted several
Se s'1'n my leet, without pam, as also a menu
Eot ~ lamlly, which have not returned since
3 6i<1zFek enjoys the reputation of saying more
-<y thlngs, with less effort, than any man in
horny. correspondent, writing of him.
= ~ . as ready as an American, bright as a
'nck1ean, and singing as Spaniard, in his
zcoin and epigrams-
7spe8r Boy at the foot of the class, spell
Bog y.--A-d-m-i-t-t-a-n-c-e, admittance
Itrrhr.-Give the definition.
Hs9- Fifty cents; children, half price; fror
~ x<s1rye1 for ladies.
Via pig tears in her eyes, a sweet little Penn
Ee4A4 fgIrl OF i've summers asked, &" Will dea
'ie b1other Johnny die tonight, mother :?
= H1en she was assured that the doctC
,19nt not, she continued, while sobs choke
nttexenee, - Poor johnny, wish he woulC
|uss Zen | could have MS little white-handle
lls and fork
Jsnkps has much to contend with. In descril
7 a feent bali at Columbia. s. c., he attempt,
.pt3k Of Mrs. Theodore Hammond as - excec
III &Feiy in long train and short sleeves - b.
oenloniscll printer made him mention - VI
f9cere Hammond was exceedingly lovely on
; win IA his shirt Sleeves
q GLAcTIcAL ExPLANATIoN.-
Charity what Is osculation9"
Oseui2IiOn- Jenny dear.
--74 u Earned expression, queer,
OF nice sensation
pat my arm, thus, round your waist,
-I ms 8 approximation;
You nred far
THERE'S one here
our lips quite near
thsnn-
90. dear!"
Ngsnny, that's osculation.p
They sell pretty good brandy in Massachusett
neisnp there lately bought some brandy. an
ing IL home hung 1t up in a bottle by ii
s-plice, when the following circumstance toe
'se es related by himself afterwards: {"
. %niddiing cold night, and when got up
1 kning found the bottle bad dropped {
lbu AIN DEOkeD luIO thousand piece
2 y brandy was all right-there it hung ,
g FIii hung It on, froze soldier than thu
30 story comes from Cedar Falls. Iowa. ga
81 bridegroom dreamed on bis weddiI
~ that be was chained to log ON a railroa
90 and awOke to find himself on the 10
Y pls heae nearly mashed with chair, and &
10 woma1 standing over him, asking if
2 tFnssonery for brides 10 be dragged out
= % the feet She said she had never submit
- such extOrtiJn before. and she'd be darns
- would now. He told her it was new
!. too
<tor Theodore Hall, who seeks a divorce .
%ouis, has a tale of rare matrimonial intellect
real. The wife weighs thirty pounds mo
ne. and, he says mournfully. .. always o,
pest OF me; she would strike me and kn1c
Foand generally" Once she Knocked hi
WITH coal oil lamp. and lamps aud q,
ri. were her usual weapons, indeed, thoup
o'nesunes varied to the use of the hatcbe
says' sadly, Sie was too sharp to sho
eA'fer before marriage"