The herald. (Smyrna, Del.) 1870-1871, 1871-08-05
NO. 81.
Written for the He ald.1
A BARBEROUB SKETCH.
Bf JOHN voss.
"But since no reason can confute yej
III try to force YOU to your duty.n

"But since no reason can confute yej
I'll try to force you to your duty
-Hudi6ras.
In the vicinity of Third and Chestnut
streets, locality, yclept the "Bafbary
Coast" from the fact, perhaps, that it's
there that "shavers'' most do congre
gate, a skilful knight of the razor holds
his diurnal Gathering" levees, and with
master hand mows whole acres of hir-
suite stubble from the chins of his mo-
merous customers. A day or two ago, I
dropped lfor he abides below the pave,)
in upon Caesar Augustus" to place
myself under his expert manipulations,
and doffing coat and hat, soon had the
polished blade rattling swiftly DER the
uneven surface of my unshorn cuticles
Perched upon chair at my left hand.
"A burly specimen of the genus homo was
having the last artistic touches applied
to huge and bristl,ng moustache, the
original color of which was evidently a
brilliant red, but now its ebon blackness
Wed with the ravens wing; and when he
arose from his seat and, by the aid OF a
friendly mirror close at hand, surveyed
it thoroughly from every standpoint, he
appeared to be perfectly charmed by the
transformation; his self. satisfied air was
calculated to cause all those whose locks
were of the Solferino hue, to cry aloud,
"Dye one! dye all dye noblyr
elbow much'll yez be afther chargin'
fur thot same?" demanded he of the
moustache, in that peculiarly classic di-
alect which at once betrayed his Grecian
origin.
"rhirty-five cents, sab - politely re-
piled Caesar.
"Fhot's thot yez said? Thirty-toive
cints; do yez take me for bhroker,
millionair, or dom fule Shure, niv-
er in all my born days paid more nor tif-
teen cints befoor-tin cints for the black
in an foive for the shave-an', begorra.
I'm not goin' TO shwindled by the loike5
av you or ony ither nagurr'
"Dat am our regular charge, sah-
twenty-five cents for de Opaque applica-
shun on de lips, sab, and ten cents for dc
removal OBJ de capillary. All de profes
sors in dis naborhood charge de same,
1 SAllf anu 4 sc Ab hOhOl bOQAo w ohS'hh
to sustain the rules oh de professions; be-
sides, no genum'n ebber detected to dem
reasona BILE terms befo', sah."
"Who the divil said Uuz ginthle-
mon? Hadn't yez bother wait ontil
lay claim till the doubtful distincshun?
Oneyhow, all AK is fur yez till take the
fifteen cints, let me off, an don't be af-
ther standin' there, showin' yer ivories
loike chessy cat. Divil wan av NELL
iver Civ yez thirty foive cints fur that
job. so yez kin jist make your mind aisy
upon that score, mi honey"
"I'se perfecxly calm, is-calm as II
mornin' in May. I goliy, you'll find,
sab, dat dis chile has de audacity to adj
here to the 'riginal claim-thirty-five
cents-ard not red cent less, sab,
shuah's yer BON. Look yeah, Mr..
; What's s. yer name STAN yer, sab, on
l de commutable principles OBJ justice, an
no airthly power shill draw yer uncle
from de pcsish dat's what's de mat
ter"
"Howld yer whist, ye dirty, black,
weazened sphalpeen; there's yer fifteen
e cints," Throwing that amount upon tho
e tablet tan, be the powers of Molly Kel-
: ly, it's all yell git off me, onyhow."
With that Pandeen started for the door
but Caesar, equal to the great emergen--
}, cy, quickly followed, and snatching the
:, jaunty beaver from his brow, held it
aloft as security for the balance. Them
u with heallong speed, Hibernia rushed
up stairs, cursing the while in Irish most
It exquisite, and vowing he'd bring down
It the thunders of the law upon the closely
II curled caput of the tonsorial artist.
d Whether it was the intense rays of the
l. d-day sun playing upon his uncover
r ed occiput or upon sober second
. thought he came to the just conclusion
3 that he had, metaphorically, "pat his
foot in it," or whether
* consideration like an angel came,
ia And whipped the offending Adam out OF
I'd him."
4 I'm not prepared to state; but certain ii
s. is that before Caesar Augustus" had
ceased sprinkling the ''pepper sauce
upon my Uranium, the war-like Greek
returned, promptly planked down the
n deficit sum, picked up his bat that was
Id in "hoe,' and leisurely left our presence
=. saving "niver a word.'
or PHILA., Pa, Aug. l, 1871.