The Athens post. [volume] (Athens, Tenn.) 1848-1917, 1871-08-03
John on the Rail.

type sends ihs expcrience in Rochester
to a New York city paper:
l did not find the. .luxnriant cuss who
stole my watch on the Bleeckcr street
cars in Syracuse, and hearing that an
awful mean looking fellow had been
seen in Rochester, l went there. The
watch was one Of Juggernauts make,
and wanted it. On.the way to the
depot in Syracuse real nice little lap
dog jumped over the fence and sprang
at me. lie weighed more than $40
worth of coal at June prices, and as
gazed down his mouth I thought of
Jonah. He remarked TO me, "Bow, wow.
wow." and said to him, in a pacifying
way. "Nice Teaser, pretty little Teaser,"
but lady shouted "Rovcr, Rover here,
Rover and he left me. Then she quiz
etly informed me that needn't be
frightened; the dog had had his dinner.
and wasen't hungry.
got into the cars and took q seat in
| ljuXiaposi. ion to female. That females
face was d perfect insurance company
for her-it insured her against ever get
ting married to anything but b ind nan.
| Her mouth was like crack in q dried
lemon. and there was no more express
| -ion in her face than there is In spinal
column OF a cup Of cold custard. She APP
peared as if abe had been through one
famine and had got about two-thirds
through another. She was old enough
to be great. grandmother to Mary that
had the little lamb. She was chewing
prize popcorn, and carried in her hand
yellow rose. while a band.box and
q cotton umbrella nestled sweetly by
her side. Icould not guess whether she
was OH mission of charity or going
West 10 start saw mill. was full Of
curiosity to hear her speak, so I said
to her: .......
"The exigencies of the times require
great circnmspction in a person who is
travelling" ...
Says she "What?' ..
Says /, "The orb of day shines re.
splendent in the blue vault above"
She hitched around uneasy like. then
she raised her umbrella and said, 81
don't want none of your sass--git OUT
And I got out.
Thea took q seat alongside of male
fellow. who looked like the ghost OF
Hamlet heightened out. He was a
stately cuss, and he was reading.
Said I, Mister, did you ever see a
camel leopard?" said camel leopard
because it is pious animal and ii new
er eats any grass without getting down
on its knees. He said he haden't seen q
camel leopard. Then said l, "Do you
chew ?"
He said. mo sir"
Then said, How sweet is nature"
He took this for a connundrum, and
said "he didnt know" Then he said
he was dcply interested in the history O
a great man. "Alas !" he exclaimed, "w,
have but few"
| told him | knew one-"the man tina
made my cooking stove was grat'
man."
Then lie asked me "would read ?"
Says l, "What you got?"
He replied, "Watt's Hymns, Reveries
by Moonlight, and How to spend thu
Sabbath
said, "None of them for Hannah,
but if he had got an unabridged liction
ary of New York l would take little
read. ....
Then he said. "Young man, look a.
these gray hairs?"
told him I saw them, and when s
man got to be as old as he was he ough
to dye, Said l, "You needn't thinl
those hairs are any sign of wisdom; it,
! only sign that your system lacks Iron,
and advised him to go home and swal
low crow bar.
lie took this for irony and what littl'
!. entente coMi0le there vas between u
!. spilled. ItlurneG out that he was chap
lain to q base ball cub.