Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1871-08-18


European Combination Against AmerI-
cA-Utter Ruin OF the Republic,
From the Indianapolis News
The following is supposed to have teen
written in 1892 by Max Adeler, who was a
witness of the terrible scenes which occur
red at the time of which the story telle.-
The English satire, 1.-The Battle of Dork-
ing," supplied the suggestion OF this pro-
pEetic tale
THE CONQUEST OF AMERICA
You ask me to tell you, my children, of
the events which Immediately preceded the
destruction of the once great American
Union, and the capture Of the country by
its present European rulers, and to say
something also of the cause which led to
these deplorabe results. I undertake the
task y ith b avy heart, for when I revert
to that terrible time I cannot help con-
contrasting our proud condition up 20
IL at IA. al year with the humIliatipg posi-
ton occupied now By the American peo-
pie. The story is a short one. In the fall
of 1872 Horace Greeley, the editor Of q
newspaper in New York. was elected Presi-
dent If the United States. The people
voted for him because tLey thought be
was an honest man. And SO he was. But
he was also vain and weak, and he enter
taiued certain fanaticaI and preposterous
notions-about agricultural matters, for
instance-Which he was determine d to
force upon the people at all hazards and
despite all opposition. He believed,
among other things, that every man ought
to go to tue Yves; to earn his bread, and
long befcTe be was chosen President be
used to advise everybody to move to that
re gion, and as q cure for al the disasters
that could tefall tx e human family.
DRIVING THE sEABoARD POPULATION WET
AS soon as be reached the Executive
Mansion, which We used to call the White
House, President Greeley organized an
army of two hundred thousand men and
proceeded to force the entir5 population
of the Seaboard States westward at the
point OF the bayonet. The utmost violence
was Used. Those who resisted we're shot
down aud their dead bodies were carried
of to national factory, which the Presi-
dent had established for making some kind
of fantastcal fertilizer. All the large cities
of the East were depOpulated, and the
towhs were entirely empty. Tue army
swept before it millions of men, women
and children, until the vass plains west of
Kaneas were reached, when the pursuit
CT ased and the army was drawn up in a
continuous line, with orders to shoot any
OF course hundreds of thousands OF these
poor unfortunate creatures perished from
starvation. This seemed to Tighten Presi-
dent Greeley, and he sent a message to
Congress recommending that seven hun
dred thousand volumes of a book of his,
entitled "Nhat [ know about Farming"
should be voted d for the relief of the starry
ing sufferers. This was done, and farming
and seeds were supplied and
then the millions of wretched outcasts
made an effort to till the ground. Of the
result of this [ will speak further on.
ALL EUROPE IN ARMS AGAINST AMERICA.
In the meantime the President was do
ing infinite harm to the country in anoth
er way. His handwriting was so fearfulIy
and wonderfully bad that no living man
could read it. And so when he sent his
first annual message to Congress-the dc
cament was devoted wholly to the tariff
aud agriculture-a sentence appeared
which subsequently was ascertained to be,
'Large cultivation of rutabagas and beans
is the only hope Of the American nation, I
am sure" The printers not being able to
this, put it in the following form
in which it went to the world: "The
Gar Of Russia couldn't keep clean if he
washed himself with the whole Atlantic
ocean once dayw This perversion of
Tie n6 SS0DRcC WAS lLu I0lHFdpI0O
to Russia by the Russian minister, and the
Gear was SO indignant that he Immediate
~ declared war.
inst at this time President Greeley un-
dertook to write some letter to Prince
Bismark upon the subject of potato rot,
and, alter giving his singular views at
great length, he concluded with the state
ment, that If the Emperor William said
that subsoil ploughiDg was net good in
light soils, or that guano was better than
bone dust, he was ''liar, villain, and
slave ?" Of course the Emperor also i'm
declared war, and because an |
ally of Russia and of England against |
which latter country Mr.. Greeley had ac
tually begun hostiiities already because |
The Queen, in her speech from the throne, |
had declared the Tribune's advocacy of a !
tariff on pig iron incendiary, and caIcula-
ted to disturb the peace of nations.
Unhappily this was not the full me easure |
Of our disasters. The President had sent
10 the Emperor of Austria a copy OF his
book g What 1 know" &c with his auto |
graph upon fyleat The Emperor MIS-
took the signature for q caricature of the |
Austrian eagle, and he readily joined in |
the war against the United States while |
France was provoked to the same act by |
the fact that when the French minister |
came to call upon Mr.. Greeley to present |
bis credentials, the President, who was
writing an editorial at the time. not COM
the French language, mistook |
The ambassador for beggar, and without !
looking up handed him quarter and an
order for clean shirt, and said TO him,
'' Go West, young mango West"
GREELEY AND CABINET HANGED.
So all these nations joined in making
war upon the United States. They swoop-
ed down upon her coasts and landed with
out opposition, for those exposed portions
of our unhappy country were absolutely
deserted, The President was afrsid to
cell away The army from Kansas a. first,
for fear the outraged people upon the
plains would come East in spite of him.
But at last he did Summon the army to
his aid, and it moved to meet the enemy.
It was too late. Before the troops reached