The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1871-09-21
GHnorons.

day to get married.
Some people say that dArk-hSir-
eel women live longest.
"VilI you take sumdmgg' said
German teetotaller TO a friend while
standing near a tavern. i don't care
if I do" was The reply. We'll den
let us take n valkr'
my son. said a man OF donbt-
ful morals. putting his hand on the
head Of young urehin, i believe
Satan has got hold YOU" II be-
lieve so too" was the reply.
A celebrated lawyer once said the
three most troublesome Of his eli
ents he ever had were q young la
dy who wanted to be married,
married woman who wanted di-
vorce, and on old maid who didn't
know what she wanted.
For the benefit Of young persons
afflicted with freckles, we would in
form them that powdered nitre,
moistened with water, applied "a
the face night and morning, viii at
once remove all traces of them.
Josh Billings has Issued sup
plorent to his famous essay on the
mule. Here it is in full; The
mewl IL a larger burd than the guse
turkey; it has tn legs to walk with
and tn moro tn kick with, and it
wares its wings ON the side of its
head
\ party of gentlen1en in q saloon
were disputing over the question
whether the American system Of
treating Or the European system Of
not treating was teferable, could
not settle The matter by talking; SO
they went to work testing it by praci
tice. First every man took drink
by himself. Then each man inyi-
vited a single friend to drink. Af-
ter that each single friend return
ed the compliment. And finally
each man in the party-therc were
six of tlem-asked nh the rest to
drink. When all that was accom-
plished not a soul in the room was
able to tell where the discussion or
iginated, or what it was about.
a fashion writer reports that the
mTlliners openings will take place
earlier than usual this year, and it
is limited that the few fashioned
bonnets VIII be perfectly '1oyeg''
and exquisite.
Having got rid of the PIussisns,
France now mourns the advance Of
the phylloxera vastatrix-which is
a bug.
The Indian women Of Washing
Territory all ride astrfde, usually
with baby in front, and another
one little older sticking among the
bundles and bags with which the
pony is caparisoned.
A Janesville, Wis, editor has dis
covered that many young ladies of
that city wear their corsets in bed
with the strings tightly laced. The
editor neglects to say how he hap
pens to know 50 much.
A man who ran away from his
wife in Massachusetts,, with anoth-
er woman, got tired of his new af-
fnity after spending all his money,
and wrote to his wife to send him
funds to pay his Way back to her.
She didn't do it.
A Wyoming correspondent says
that in most Of the jurics during
the recent court at Cheyenne there
was a slight sprinkling of women.
In capital cases female jurors are
placed in charge Of female baliifj
and are allowed 20 retire 10 an
apartment by themselves during the
intermissions of the court, until the
cause is finally submitted, when
they are, Of course, required TO be
shut up with their associates of the
sterner sex until they can agree mp
on a verdict. This is soid to af.
ford a fine opportunity for innocent
semi-hirtatiohs; but it is not alles-
ed that tho lady jurors did anything
of the sort.
Il fear" said a country minister
to his flock, "when / explained TO
you, in my last charity sermons
that philanthropy was the love Of
our species, you mist have misan-
derstood me to say specie, which
may account for the small collect
ion. You viii prove, / hope by
your present contribution, tilatyo
are no longer laboring under the
same mistake"
A quarrelsome couple were dis
cussing the subject Of epiLaphs and
tombstones, and the husband said:
My dear, what kind Of stone do
you suppose they viii give me az
ter dieg' "Brimstone; my lover
was the affectionate reply'
Dutchman has got off tie best
thing on tire New York Orange Hi
bernian ios: "if dey wahts some
fights. lee them go back to de bla-
ees dey cooms from and get all
de fighting dey wants. Why &c