Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1871-10-18
BREvITIEs AND LEVITIEs.

Coming to grief-Meeting trouble half
way. ..e5
A prickly pair-A porcupine and hedge
hog. E 10
1t is easier for man to be engaged than
to be engaging. s- r-. s d
How to overcome your sorrows-ISrike
one of your own signs. a
Gravity is no more evidence of wisdom
than paper collar is of a shirt.
Money is great lever in the affairs of
man-sO great lever, some of us can never
keep it.
Another poor girl has died in Virginia
from the use of tobacco, at the age of 100.
She was an orphan.
What is the difference between an auc-
ton and sea-sicknsss? One is a sale of
effects and the other is the effects of a sail.
A man in New Albany, Indiana, CON
tracted with fellow for $3.50 to whip his
wife, and stood by to see that the work was
properly done. -
An Indiana preacher evolved terribly
persuasive and personal sermon from the
text, "You know how it is yourself"
Another illipUtian marriage has taken
place at Rochester. The bride was twenry-
seven inches in height, and the groom
about twice that.
The Boston TrGUeller announces that the
cemeteries around that city are now s'Inost
attractive for temporary visitors"
The Mayor Of Marion, Ala, is serving out
his unexpired term of office in the peniten-
tiary for stealing less than the rest of the
officers do.
A cute fellow, who is just beginning his
pathological studies, says that the cause of
the potato rot is the ROTARY motion of the
earth.
A San Francisco editor thus addresses an
Oakland brother: "YOu wOllapus, you ic-
thyodorulite, you bogus hammocrysos, you
you Gakander."
A Memphis hOrseman was hurled from
his saddle bodily twenty feet into a saloon.
He drank some rum, arranged his hair,
remounted and rode away.
-"AIark Twain has resolved to become a
taxpayer in Hartford, which city has been
noted for its marked wane for some years
past.
A correspondent wants to know the best
way to become literary man. Well. the
quickest way is for him to take a short vow
age to sea. He will then very likely become
a contributor to the AtlUntic.-Nelo York
Leader.
The weatherologist of the Boston TTaaS-
cript is entitled TO all the honor arising from
the discovery that good rain in dry time
is a good thing. Out this way we have
rains only in wet weather.-Toledo Blade.
Some idea of the amount of American
trvel in Europe can be formed when we
learn that for the year ending June so last,
81 yS5S passengers left this country for the
Old World. The number of Americans
abroad who came home during the quarter
ending at che same time was 1870.
The fact that fossilized oyster has bee
found on one of the mountain peaks of
Utah is worthy the consideration of geOlOg-
lists. Is it a relic of the pre-Adamite period,
or the debris of some aboriginal feast in lta-
er ages, when oysters contributed the first
course of savage epicures?
An enterprising phrenOlogist once wrote
polite note to the late Charles Dickens,
asking permission TO make an examination
of his Uranium. Mr.. Dickens replied
"Dear Sir-At this time L require the use
of my skull, but as soon as it shall be at
leisure l will willingly place it at your dis
posal."
The great progress that has been made
in labor-saying machinery is well illustrated
by the fact that no less than seventy farm
ers have been cut to pieces by moving
machines this season in Illinois. 1t would
have taken the most expert wood chOppera
long time to do this with the old fashioned
axe.
On an ancient tombstone in a graveyard
in WinslOw, Me-, is inscribed: "Here lies
the body of Richard Thomas, an English
man by birth, Wing of '76, by occupation
a cooper, now food for worms like an old
rum puncheon marked, numbered and
shocked, he viii be raised again and finished
by his Creator"
A correspondent has been figuring up the
miles of existing telegraph wires. Il an
pears there are 10000 miles In Europe.
10000 in America, 1900 in India, 10000 /
in Australia, and 10000 of submarine cable.
Total, 6S4,000 miles, to which there are adj
ditions being made at the rate of 100000 !
milesper year. At this rate of increase il
will not be many years till all communica-
tions are made by lightning, and nearly as
cheaply as as they were conducted twenty
years ago by mail. H II
''What substitute can there be for the en-
deaTments Of ones sister," exclaimed Mary. /
''The endearments of some other fellows
sister," replied John. ga
Mr.. Kean of the Maxwell, after an alb
sence of some length in Louisville, returned |
fl,ok