Vermont farmer. [volume] (Newport, Orleans County, Vt.) 1870-1877, 1871-09-23
V MONT FARM E r.

ly wounded on the field and boat loaded
with ears of corn moored close by.
A lady ut Long Branch eXcites great
deal of amusement by taking her daily bath
in the ocean arrayed in waterproof bathing
suit India-rubber shoes, an oil-skin cap, In
da-rubber gloves and wire mask over her
face.
woman recently gave the Baptist board
$1,000 for the freedmen on condition that not
one cent Of it should go to any one using to-
bacco. The good brethren now find an ele-
plant on their hands, as an anti-tobacco
darkey has never yet been born.
Henry Ward Beechcr is not less vigorous
in denunciation of the fithiness of tobacco
chewing than the pious King james. 81 re-
gard tobacco" says Mr.. Beecher, las the
most selfish of luXuries; | never knew
dozen users of it who cared whether they
smelled agreeably or not. Unless arbitrari-
~ restrained they will render life intoerable.
driving people out of seats in cars and steam
boats, and absolutely making homes unendu-
rable."
The wife of n prominent merchant in Buff
falo played sharp game on some burglars,
not long since. Hearing n rafting of VIM
dow blinds in the night, she crept to the
woodshed and procured an AK. When the
hand of the most advanced burglar rested on
the window-sill she chopped off four fingers,
and was not molested further. The next
day she visited the various doctors with her
trophies, and found them to belong to n
neighbor, who was supposed to he above
such things.
young cavalier at Wytheville, Va, put
clandestine notions into the head of his lady
love by telling her "to meet HIM in the gar
den, Maud" which she did, one evening, by
rope and pulley, and found him waiting.
Her papa, Il man of stalwart frame and no
delicacy of feeling, was also in ambush there,
and when the young lady landed. he seized
; Romeo, inserted the hook of the rope she
came down by into the seat of his dOeskins,
and, eevating him between heaven and
earth, let him dangle till morning.
Not great while since, at social gather
ing in New Orleans, a young lady, dressed
in the extreme of fashion, glitterng with
diamonds. sat silent and apart from the rest,
taking no part in a conversation purely liter
AIRY in its character. The gentleman of the
house approached her, with the remark :
"You do not appear to be enjoying yourself"
!, mo" said the lady, "this is too dry for me.
Amt there nobody here that can flirt?''
| "Flrt" said he, "Ah, see-you are n sort
. of Cleopatra in disguise" cleopatra! No.
l rejOined the intelligent beauty 81 never
I liked Indians"
The southerners always were a religious
people. They could see something divine
even in slavery but still, ut times they do
: not draw the dividing line closely enough be-
tween secular and spiritual matters, land
: lord and tenant in Mobile, who had had a
4 little difficulty about rent, attended the same
| church. In taking up the collection, the
h landlord, seeing his tenant deposit one OF
Uncle Sans promissory notes in the ''sas-
4 SER" openly dunned him for his rent; but
0 the latter only replied: "You must be II fool
: to think am going to pay you in church,
q and us the landlord began to talk louder and
S attract attention, the debtor flung the con-
fonts of hiS cnufl. bny into tho colln,ri, o,,oe