The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1871-04-09
Isrning Star and Catholic Messenger.
NEW ORLEANS, SUNDAY. APRIL 0. 1911.
WIr AND wIsDOM,

went to bed In the dark. q
"Well, there is something in that J" as Z
the man said when he tried to put his boot I
ON with kitten in it. t
The theatre of war is closed for the pres
emit. A peace is in preparation when We
hope will have an unprecedented run.
A negro, on being examined, was asked
if his master was a true Christian. NO,
sir, he is a Republican," was the reply.
A wealthy widow, advertising for an
agent, was overwhelmed with applications.
as the types, by mistake, made it "a gent"
"The prisoner has very smooth coun-
tenance.n "Yes, he was ironed just before
he was brought in. That accounts for IT."
That woman was q philosopher who,
when she lost her husband, said she had
one great consolation-she knew where lie
was o. nights!
In describing new organ, rural eaitor
SAYS, "The swell died away in delicious
suffocation, like one singing sweet song
under the bed clothes"
An impudent youngster came very near
getting his ears boxed the other night at
Wedding party for wishing the bride "many
happy returns of the day"
A Florida jury trying case OF larceny
aoainst a negro woman, brought a verdict
that owe. the jury, find the prisoner not
guilty, but believe she stole the goods"
nHave YOU BLASTED Hopes =" asked a
lady of green librarian, whose lace was =
much swollen by toothache. mo, ma'am,,
he replied, "but I've o blasted toothache.
Jerrold said to an ardent young gentle
man. who burned with a desire to see him
self in print, BE advised by me, young
man: don't take down the shutters before
there is something in the window"
A termacant, whose husband finally beat
her, ran home to her father to eomplaln'
and the old man, with great indignation,
4 said. "Tell your husband that if he ever
y beats my daughter again, I'll beat his wife"
q A colored barber in Iowa, being subp@,
4 naed to serve as a juror, was, on the usual ~,
examination, asked, Are you q voterI"
and brought down the hosse by answering,
81 "I'se black enough, but not old enough"
& A Philadelphia paper insists that Tine tne
Is Pennsylvania Legislature is 30 corrupt tnat
& hin Endorsing the Ten Commandments
sconld not be got through that body without
ian expenditure of large sums in bribery
and black-mail."
Y Yankee, having told an Englishmat
that he shot, on one particular occasion
nine hundred and ninety nine snipe, his IN
sarIocutor asked him why he didn't maxi
a a Thousand at once. "No," said he, ="
isn't likely I'm going to tell lie for on
xNipe."
R"You have been here a long time, sup
tose.n said a pompous English Traveller
d old hunter in Oregon, VINO 4aI ha uue
,ssd he hunter and then continued, "Yo
~ that mountain theref Well, sir, vine
came to this country that mountain was
i6le in the ground"
A Georgia colored debating society wa
Asely discussing, (which is the oese ~ =
,aps Of the eropi" An old "uncle" spolk
iba sense of the meeting when he thoughl
aBofe was the best, if dey could only
hung togedder somehow"
klittle boy in Wisconsin was being p,
to bed the other night about dark, when
tGS him the chickens went to bed earl
and he must do SO too. Ihe httle ieLo
sad he would if his mother would 90
asthe old hens did-go to bed first, TIL
coax. the chickens to come.
Ateachcr of the freedmen was sitting
the window of her room watching "
negroes loading goods into cart. one
them was supposed to shirk; the OIL
stopr,ed, and looking sharply at the Ia
one. aaid, "Sam, do you expect to 60
Heaven Z" eyes" "Then take holo
lift"
The following words actually formed !;
neroration of the counsers plea for his cii'
n an. ssault and battery case in Athe
Alahama: "Let the humble ass crop
thistle of the valley! Let the sagacl,
goat browse upon the mountain prov,
say, gentlemen of the jury, John Gun
is not gullty. :.
When in Aberdeen, DR.. Johnson on
with clergyman, the soup being hGt
notch. The lady of the house, after h
Ing served him once, asked if he W 70
taIe some more. The gruf and ST
morast and out-spoken social bear reP p,
cts dish fit for hogs, madam.
little more, then" was the Immediate
appropriate reply.
A child, while walking through an
gallery with her mother, was attrac as
q statue of Minerva. "Who is that
she. "My child, that is Minerva, the
dess of Wisdom" "Why didn't tney
her husband, tooq" Because she
none, nv child.n "That was because
was wise, wasn't it, mamma ~ was the
less reply.
An acquaintance from-the country
ing visited some friends, and being a
to depart, presented little boy, one 0
family, with half dollar IN the pre- =
Please. iS it O QOOO