Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1871-12-13
SPECIAL NOTICE.
FACTS AND FANCIRs.


Long absence mskea the heart grow
fonder-of some one else.
This years run Of Congressmea are
generally leaving their wives at home.
An uncle of George Francis Train
has made oath that Francis is lunatic,
and has asked to be appointed guardian
over him.
Look out for big words and heap of
them; Miss Evans, the author of St.
Elmo, is to write a biography of Alex
ander Fl. Stephens"
Since the abolition of the purchase Of
commissions in the British army the Of
fcers are resigning by hundreds. The
Dublin brigade Office has had 400 appli-
cations to retire.
Butter was first made for cosmetic,
and was once used for illuminating pur-
poses 1t was not known as an assistant
in dispatching bread, much, if any, be-
fore the Christian era.
A traveller, we are told, being in a
wild country where he could find no pro-
visions for himself and dog, cut off the
dogs tail aud boiled it for supper, and
gave the dog the bone.
It won't do to believe implicitly in the
obituary notices OF distinguished men.
Cluseret, the great blowhard, is alive and
back in New York, and Marshal Benedek
is reported still living, by the Cologne
Gazette.
A Southern California paper adver-
tises for "a young freckled-face man
that won't back down, with a pair Of
saddle-bags, pistol and bowic-knife, to
collect for this Office. A large salary
will be paid
" All, Dick, l have buried my brother
since l saw you" Served him right,
said Dick. What do you mean, sir9'
was demanded. Why" said Dick.
would it have been serving him right
to leave him unburiedY
Four New York girls we're seen play
ing euchre while driving in Central
Park. A handkerchief served the pur-
pose of card-stand, and in the lap of
one of the players were several frac-
tional notes forming the pool.
II find, Dick, that you are in the habit
of taking my jokes and passing them off
as your own. Do you call that gentle
manly conduct2' ITO be sure l do,
Tom. A true gentleman will always
take joke from friend"
One of the most serious objections to |
living in small village, one not quite
large enough to be called town, and
yet too large 70 denominate town,
is the fact that every one gets in the
habit of speaking of it as :" a place. F"
The honest truth: Aunt-"And SO,
Tom, you're learning music, among
other things How do you like it'll"
Toni hate i'll" Aunt" Indeed
Which of your studies do you preferY'
Tom" well-music2 '-P Punch
Satan seems to have entered all the
Illinois cows. In the town of Grant
Mrs. Garbush went up TO COW to quiet
her. The animal suddenly threw up its
head, and one horn entered the woman's
mouth, just back of her upper teeth, and
came out through the face, near the left
eye.
One who signs herself A Plural
Wife for Seventeen Years" writes to a
Utah paper that the Mormons will cleave
to polygamie principles through time
and eternity. What pleasant idea,
to he surrounded by twenty or more OF
your own private angels in heaven
Theirs to Plus TX Please take your
Nuncio home" Plus to Theirs: Why2 |
Does France also rep udiate the pledges
Of the centuries?" Theirs to Plus (wiping
his eye with his coat sleeve: 81 am aw-
full sorry, but cant help it. Bismarck
says | must send him off, " Plus to
Theirs: Obedience is a great virtue.
A servant should obey his master
Ereunt ODnes, Bismarck snickering.)
81 say, old Chatter" says one of the
burntouters irreverently to this depo-
nent, dor't l feel good to-day, eh2"
Why, how's that? / thought you had
been looking uncommonly blue since
the fire." 80 have. Thought I'd
lose a cool hundred thousand. Had
policies to that amount But what dye
think2 Submitted my proofs of loss TO
the adjusters to-day. Regular eye
openers, them chaps They allowed my
proofs, but showed that the debris in my
cellar, if shipped to England, would sell
for twenty thousand dollars moreR the
riginal stock, and hence that I'm in
debted to the company for that amount.
Gave EN- my check on the spot, and am
on my way 10 dig out the relics. Dye
see2 Congratulate me, old Chattererl
and away he went chuckling over his
new fortune. These adjusters are sharp
6gurers--so it occurs to this steady-goirg
recorder Chicago Post
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