Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1871-03-16
One-TwO.
HOW TO RAISE THE WIND.


One-TYO.
HOW TO RAISE THE WIND.
About the year eighteen hundred and
sixty-odd, Mr.. Nehemiah Doolittle, an
enterprising citizen of Boston, in which
city he was born and raised, came out
West in search of something to do, and
having a natural foudness for newspapers
concluded after while to rent quanti
ty of secondhand material and start one
of his own.
But Mr.. Doolittle's enterprise failed tc
pay, as such enterprises sometimes will
and after running the concern for a few
weeks, against wind and tide, he became
convinced that he must either get up O
coup d'etdt to retrieve his fortunes or leave
town without going around to say good
bye TO his friends. the most of whom, for
reasons not wholly unconnected with mat.
ters of pecuniary character, would, be
knew, be very sorry to see him go in that
way. Therefore he made up his mind to
stay and bring to the front that down.
East genius he had brought with him
from home, but which he had hitherto
held mostly in reserve. He had little
money laid away as a provision against
the wet spell which he felt in his bones
must come at no distant day, and he de-
termined to throw the last red cent. of il
into one desperate attempt to put himself
through.
One fine morning Mr.. Doolittle's paper
failed to make its appearance as usual
The next morning. however, he issued an
extraordinarily large edition, containing
double-leaded standing "notice to sub
scribers," of which be probably bad as
many as two dozen and half, wherein
they were requested to call at the office
any Time within the next few days and
receive FIVE cents each as a reimbursement
for the loss of the paper the day before
OF course everybody who saw the notice
resolved on the spot to consider himself a
subscriber-for this WAS in Cincinnati
remember-and to call around speedily
and secure the price of a glass of beer
Having scattered this edition promiscu
ously all over the city, and especially
in the free-lunch saloons, where be
knew everybody would be sure to see it,
Mr.. Doolittle seated himself just within
the door of his countipg-room with pail
keg hatween HE knees, nnd a young. man
seated at some little distance behind him
with bis back TO the door In that nail
keg were half bushel of nickels, and in
the hands of that young man were blank
book and pencil, which, from his re-
markably sbstracted air, he was supposed
to be handling merely because he had moth.
ing else to do and plenty of time in which
to do it. Very soon the hour arrived when,
in that city of lager and lunch fields
everybody, wiping his mouth on the skirt
of his coat, is on his way back to business
long distance out of his way for q much
smaller sum than Mr.. Doolittle had ad-
vertised his readiness to pay, that enter
prising and conscientious publisher was
not surprised to find his subscribers rap.
idly dropping in to be reimbursed. With
smile that was child-like and bland Mr.
Doolittle handed them each nickel and
asked them each two leading questions:
/. Excuse me, but is this Colonel Hal
stead"
Flattered at the idea OF being mistaken
for the renowned warrior of the CONNER
cisl, the subscriber" invariably replied,
"No, my name is Tom, or Dick, or Harry
or whatever it happened to be; whereup-
on Mr.. Doolittle would exclaim !: "What !
not General Tom, or Dick, or Harry" and
then the subscriber" again fattered,
would smile benignly and give HE name
in full.
2. 81 hope you like our psper--how
long have you been a subscriber ?"
Taken off his guard by the unexpected
nn ha tlx-
"sbout six months"
And the answers to the questions thus
obtained were promptly recorded by the
abstracted young man in the rear with a
blank book and pencil. When several
Subscribers" came in at the same time.
of course Mr.. Doolittle had to obtain by
short process the information be wanted,
but he seldom failed to get it either one
way or another.
In less than three days, during which
the reimbursing department of the estsh-
lishment was kept running at concert
pitch, the nsil.keg was empty, and MIR.
Doolittle had the satisfaction of finding
that the young mans list of "subscribers"
exhibited grand total that the books of
the Office had never hoped for in their
widest dreams. Against each of these
Mr.. Doolittle Immediately
proceeded to make out bill for SIX
months subscription, more or less, and
then turned out to hunt him up, which
by the help of the city directory and of
that keen instinct implanted in the infant
mind by the shadow of Bunker Hill
Monument, was less difficult task than
one would be apt to suppose. Of course,
everybody when his bill was presented
denied that he was "subscriber" to the
paper. but on being reminded of the lit
tie nickel transaction in the counting
room and the questions asked and
answered on that occasion be suffered
himself, under the mental and moral pros
tration caused for the moment by the re-
collection of the thing, to be bullied into
a settlement of the bill. Mr.. Doolittle
was not the man to give that class OF
much time for devising
means of escape from the nickel-baited
trap into which they had so blindly
walked. He seized them by the throat,
as it were, and fairly shook the money
out of them before they could possibly re-
collect that the obtaining of very small
sums of money under false pretences was
not, under the laws of Ohio, a crime
punishable with death.
And when Mr.. Doolittle had gathered
in the harvest of greenbacks which had
sprung from the keg Of nickles he had
sown broadcast over the city, and when
he had counted his gains and found tbss
he had resped several dollars f. every
nickel he had sown, he te.A an early
stroll, With Sarpet.bag in hi.
hand. ont in the MEection Of the depot of
the IittIe ,.nroad, and in . short time
thsre.Iser discovered himself the pro.
.<Ietor Of Ane family grocery in his ma
i've city, where he now permanently re-