The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1871-11-23
8nnarons.
The Way to DatIlroit.

There IS nothing so funny as the
newly arrived son of the ''Green Isle
Of the Sea" who is sure he is not
going to be done, and determined to
show the Yankees that heis a sharp
as any swan nv en-" One of this
class STEPPED into one Of the ticket
offices in the International Hotel
Block, at Suspension Bridge, the
other day, when the following dia-
logue ensued.
Pat-Shure is this the road to
Dathroit?
Agent-Yes; send you right
through.
Pat Shure its the rale road I
name, an none o thin chatin' turn
| pixies.
Agt-You want to go by the
Great Western from the Suspension
Bridge or the Grand Trunk from
Buffalo?
Pat-Divil bit! I've no clothes
for a thrunk, let alone money for
the byin' O. wun.
Agt-Well you want to go to De-
troit and NJ?
Pat-And shure I do.
Agt-Which line will you take2
Pat-Och any line shure-a fish
line for a trout or two, perhaps.
Agt-No, no; how would you
like to go-which way?
Pat Shure like a gintlemon; an
the same way me cousin, Mike Do
lin whit.
Agt-And what way was that?
Pat-Shure and he said it wus a
mighty quick way.
Agt-Then you want a ticket on
express line; give me ten dollars.
Pat-Tin dollors! What wud I
give yees tin dollars fur?
Agt-For your ticket by the ex-
press.
Pat-Shure its no express I want
at all; it's the way to Dathroit.
Agt-I know it; but there are
three ways" as you call 'em-Ex-
press, Trunk and Central; what
line will you take?
Pat(puzzled )-Ah, Ell!
Agt leaning over the counter)-
Come, my good fellow what will you
take?
Pat (glancing at a big ink bottle
that stood on the counter)-Shure
I'll take a drop O. the whiskey if its
the same to yer honor.
(This reply elected an explosion
Of laughter from half dozen other
agents who were in the same office.
One of them thinking to better
matters took Pat in hand.)
Agt-You want to 60 to Detroit?
Pat-You may say that same.
Agt-And you want to buy a
ticket?
Pat-Divil bit!
Agt-What do you want then?
Pat-Shure warnt to kno' the
way to Dathroit.
Agt-Well, buy a ticket and that
will show you the way.
Pat-But wouldn't yure homer
sho' me the way?
Agt-But how can you get there
without a ticket?
Pat-Shure I name to walk.
There were two ticket agents but
no tickets sold by that operation.
Oh am a lover rejected. Pray
what shall [ do? Shall 1 shuttle
this mortal coil, like some lovers
true?
A-Oh no; for such action make
waste of good blood. just keep up
your courage-your chance is still
good. Remuster your forces, your
colors unfurl, and 60 forth to the
conquest of some other girl!
Our "deviT" says bully, thems my
/ sentiments.
An incorrigible bore at our elbow
wants to know If W-o-r-c-e-s t Ell
| spells Wooster, why R-o-r-c-h-e-s-
ter don't spell Rooster.
The cornicopia is a horn of plen-
ty, 1t takes its name from those
who indulge in "horns" and get co
piously corned.
Mrs. Moor, of Indiana, thrashed
her husband for getting drunk
and the Louisville Ledger calls he
1.-The bride of lama Moor"
The three foot railway track il
likely to semain a peculiarly Amer
lean Institution, since it is eyiden
that they can never make a narrow
gauge a broad.
A countryman was on his way t,
attend the Railroad meeting las
Monday night at the Court Hous
with a merchant of this town an,
had got as far as the Court var,
fence when the corlored band strucl
up, and he pulled back and woul
not 90 any further. He said h
!. had been in one war, and he b
id if he was gwine to have an
$ thing to do with another one. II
left Brownsville States.