Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1871-06-13
Miss MALoNY ON TILE CHINESE OrEsrloN.

-Och don't be takln. Is 1T hoWlt
on, ye say? An didn't | how!d on til
the heart Of me was clane broke, entirely, anq
yer two hands TO think o ne. toilin like Il
nager for the six year I've been in Amerlky--
had luck to the day | iver left the
ovid country! to be bate by the likes 0 them!
lEaix an III sit down when I'm ready,
so I will, Ann Ryan, an yc'd better be llstnln
than drawin your remarks) an is 1t myIeI'
with five good charac terS from Respectable
places, would be herdin wild the haythenS
The saints forgive me but Id be bulled allvc
sooner put up wld it day longer: Sure an
was the granehorn not TO be lawn ut onct
when the missus kim into me kitchen, wild her
brought out from Califomy. "Hell be here
the night" says she, land Kitty, it's meSelt
looks to you to be kind and patient wild him
for he's filrriner, says she, kind lookln
off, Sure an it little III hinder nor inter
fare wild him nor anv other, mum, says |, !
kind O. stiff, for minded me how these French
walters, wid their paper collars and brass rings
On their fingers, isn't company TOR no gurnl
brought up dacnt and honest Och sowa Il
bit | knew what was comm till the nissus
walked into me kitchen smilin', and says kind
o schared Here Fing Wing Kitty, an
you'll have too much sense to mind his beiu Il
little strange Wid that she shoots the doore,
and I, misthrusting if was tIdled up sufficient
for me fine boy wild his paper collar looks up
and-Howly fathers may niver brathe anoth
er BREATH but there stud 4 rale haythen Chin
eser a-grinnin' like he'd just come off il tay-
box. If you'll behave me, the crayture was
that weller it nd scken you to see him and
sorra m stitch was on him but black night gown
over his trowsers and the front of his head
shaved claner nor copper bier, and black
tail arranging down from it behind: wild his
two feet stock into the heathenestest shoes you
ever set eyes on. Och but | was upstairs
afore you could turn about, glvin the missus
wornin', an only stopt wid her by her raisin'
me wages two dollars, and playdln wild me how
it was Christian s duty to bear wild haythins
and taitch EN- all in our rpower-the saints save
us Well the ways and trials I had wild that
Chineser, Ann Ryan, couldn't be tellin' -
Not blissed thing cud / do but he d be look
in on wid his eyes cooked up'ard like two
poomp-handles, an he widdout speck or
smitch O. whishkers on him, an his Gngor
nails full yard long. But it's dyin' youd be
10 see the missus 'larnin him, and GRIMM, an
wargin' his pig-tail (which was pieced out long
wid some black stool, the haythen chate and
gettin' into her ways wonderful quick, | don't
lepy, imitatin' that sharp, you'd be shurprised
and ketchin' an copyiu' things the best OF us
viii do a-hurried wild work, yet don't want
,nmin' to the knowledge of the family-bad
luck to him
Is it ate wild him? Arrah, an would be sttln
wild haythen an he a-atin' wild drum-stlcks
yes, an attn dogs an cats unknownst to ME
[ warrant YOU, which it is the custom OF them
Chinesers, till the thought made me that SICK
| could die. An didn't the crayture proter to
helm me wake ago come Toosday, an me q
toldin' down me clane cloths for the lronln', an
fiji his haythin mouth wid water, an atore
could hinder SQUIRT it through his teeth street
over the best linen table cloth, and fold it up
tight as inherent now as baby the dlrrity,
baste But the worrest of all was the copyln
he'd be don' till yed be dishtracted. ltsycr-
sell knows the tindcr feet that's on me since
ever I've bin in this country. Well, own
70 that | fell into a way O slppin' me shoes
off when I'd be settn down to pale the pratics
or the likes O. that, and, do ye mind that
haythin would do the same thing after me
whiniyir the missus set him to parln apples or
tomaterses. The saints in heaven couldn t
have made him behave he cud kape the shoes
ON him when he'd be payn anything
Did lave fur that? Faix an | didn't,
Didn't he get me into throuble wild my miSsuS,
the haythin'? You're aware ycrsel' how the
boondes comm in from the grocery often con
tains more n II 90 into anything daccntly. So,
for that matter I'd now and then take out i
SUD O sugar, or -four, or tay, an wrap it i'll pa
per and put it in me bit Of a box tucked under
the ironin blankit the how it euddent be bod
derin' any one. Well what shud it be, but
this blessed Saturday morn the missus was
spakin' pleasant and respec ful wild me IN me
Kitchen when the grocerb boy comes in an stands
f1rnenst her wild his boondleS, an she motions
like to Fng Wing (which | never would call
him bv that name ner any other but just hay
thin, she motions to him, she does, torto take
the boondles an empty out tho sugar an what
not where they belongs Ifyou'll behave me,
Ann RYAN, what did that blatherin Chineser
do but take out sup o sugar, an a handful
q tav, an a bit O chaze right atore the miSSus,
wran them into bits O paper, an | spachelesS
wild shurprze, an he the next minute up wld
the ironin' blankit and pullin out me box wId
show O bein' sly to put them in.. Och, the
Lord forgive mo, but | clutched it, and the
missus sayin', 20 kitty!' in way that ud
curddle your blood Hes a haythin nagerr:.
says I. I've found you out, says she. 4 II
artist him." says l. Its you ought to be be
arristed,' says she. You WON'T says J. Il
will" says she-and 80 it went till she give me
such sass as cuddent take from no lady-au'
I give her warnin' an left that instant, an she
a-polutlu W lno uooAe. ~ S'
A NICE DIsH.-The Chicago Times recently
published series of sketches of leading dir'nes
in that city and thus heads the article
The Preachers-A very Grand Dish of Cler-
cal Hash-The Parturition of Earthquakes,
Of Lightnings and Whirlwind-A, Good pea De
About the Several Hundred Preachers of Chi
cago-The Pecuniary Size Of the Woe; Of
those ''Who Preach for Hire'--Pen: and-lnE
Photographs of the Prominent ,Pulpiteers! O
the Garden City-Their B, Brains, Their Salaries
Their Compilations, and Their Eountenanees- mar
The Pulpits in Nuce and the Retail Trade o.
Salvation in Parvo-All of them, from Amin
.adab Sleek to Rev. Cream Cheese, and Mel
ehisedek Eowler
The 18th Of August last was the hundredth
birthday Of Napoleu Bonaparte The 18th OF
August next will be the hundredth anniversary
Il IL