The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1870-03-18
GLEANINGS.

= At Xenia, Ohio, man drank a
glass of whisky, said 'tcharge it," and
fell down dead.
Rosa Bonheur declares that she is
growing lazy and does not expect to
paint much more.
- In a game of cards good deal de-
ponds on good playing, and good play
ing on good deal.
A milkman accounted for the weak.
ness of his milk by saying that the cows
got caught in the rain.
A model surgical operation-to :
take the cheek out OF a young man, and
| the jaw out of a woman.
"a man can't help what is done be-
hind his back, as the scamp said when
he was kicked out of doors.
The Milkado of Japan has recently
imported piano from Austria-the
first ever seen in the Empire.
- If "beauty draws by single hair"
how irresistible some of the women
must be who wear a bushel-basketful.
- Which is the worst enemy of So
! ciety-the family that keeps parrot, or
| the one whose son is learning to play
the bugle?
- According to the Paris Figaro,
there was great festivity at the baptism
| of daughter of Mr.. Stcbbins, q New
York archi-miiliondire.
The sweetest word in our language
| is love. The greatest word in our Ian
| guage is God. The word expressing
the shortest time is now.
-"You are shoemaker said a
magistrate the other day, addressing the
man at the bar. Yes, Sir" was the re-
ply, ga horse shoemaker"
- Inviolable fidelity, good-humor
| and -complacency of temper outshine
all the charms of fine face and make
the decay of it invisible.
Don't imagine trouble; don't bor-
! row it; don't die before your time.
When God wants you to die he will
show you how to do it easy.
- Council Grove claims to be the first
town in Kansas that ever gave "genu-
inc celebration in honor of the opening
of railroad communication"
Didn't you guarantee, Sir, that
this horse would LOt shy before the fire
OF an enemy Z" mo more he won't.
FIisn't til alter the tire that he SHES"
- The Hon. Willie CuInback, of In
diana, having been appointed United
States Minister to Portugal, the question
naturally ARISES, Will he come back?
To Lord Neaves of the Scottish Court
of Appeal is ascribed the following dis
itch on a living philosopher:
,1 When Mil said. There is no matter.
A striking example of the inherit
ance OF homicidal propensities is fur
nished by the sons and grandsons of
DIR. Asa Crosby, twelve of whom be-
came medical practitioners.
A Minnesota Juror lately address
ed note TO the judge, in which he styled
him "Onarable Jug" Taking the bench
as it runs, the juror was nearer right
than might seem at first glance.
= Mother" said Jemima, "Sam
wants to come counting me tonight"
We'll, what did you tell him 2" "Oh,I
told him he might come. felt anxious
to see how he would act"
"A Texas paper urges subscription
for the family OF Sam, Houston, who
are very poor. There are three surViV-
ing children of the old General, aged
respectively ten, fourteen, and sixteen
years.
The Philadelphia Press announces
upon good authority that Gustave Dore
is coming to this country in q few weeks.
He is to make an art tour through the
States, and return 10 Paris in the Au-
tumn.
- Miss Emma Jones, graduate of
the Ohio Wesleyan Female College, has
taken the California State Educational
diploma over fifty 1.-TWO competitors, and
been made Professor in the Universal
ty of the Pacific.
= A constable in Kentucky, in pnb-
fishing some personal property for sale,
put up notice with the following clause
Il wyll xpose fir sail the 8 day 1866 NV
Jan wen lytle rome horse, or so much
tharof as ma be nesary to satisfi sed
gugment."
The Socialist agitator, Hartung.
has Gays The Eastern Budget success
fully made his escape from Austria in
the disguise of an engine driver, and is
now at Zurich, whence he issues infiam-
matory proclamations addressed to the
workmen of Vienna.
= Prince Arthur appreciates all the
agony" which was "piIed on" for him
in the United States, by saying that q
ball given in the one-horse, or rather
Canadian pony, town of Ottawa, was
"unequalled by anything he saw on this
side of the Atlantic"
= The Quincy Evening Journal of the
I'd inst, says that on that afternoon there
were ten car loads of Swedes at the de-
pot on their way to Kansas, from Ohio.
They compose a colony, and are leaving
the Buckeye State to better their for
tunes in the far West.
- Salt Lake, in Utah, is seven feet
higher than it was ten years ago, and is
constantly rising. 1t has been urged by
those who have paid attention to the
subject, that the rise of water there
would produce solution ofthe Mormon
question before Congress would act up
on il.
= An old lady receiving letter she
supposed was from one of her absent
sons, requested her neighbor to read it.
He accordingly began to read: "Dear
mother" then paused, as the writing
was rather illegible. ats from john
suffered"
- The papers are passing around an
item to the effect that black walnut lum-
Der is being shipped from Fort Scott to
New York, where it is worth S125
thousand. A good quality of this val
liable lumber is being used over in North
Topeka, in the construction of depot
platform and sidewalk.
= A man on being told by gener.
Gus farmer that he would give him
barrel of cider, asked him IL he could
bring it to his house. "CertaiHly," re-
piled the farmer, with pleasure"
WELL" said the grateful recipient,
"what will You pay me for the barrel
when the cider is gone 2"
"A grand banquet was given in the
Grand Hotel, Paris, on the 10th inst,
in honor of II. Pouyer Quertier, the
prominent Protectionist. French in
dustry was represented by three hun
dred guests, who had come from fifty
departments. He was presented with
magnificent silver ornament.
When NJ. Olivier was leaving the
Corps Legislatif after the scene on the
18th inst, he said to III. Garnier-Pages.
81 am entitled to an explanation from
yoa, III. Garnier-Pages, and hope You
will give it tomorrow morning" Fears
of duel were entertained in conse-