The Tiffin tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1868-1887, 1870-08-18
JONATHAN IN CHINA.
He Gives His Most Offensive National
Traits an Airing Before 4 Mandarin.

JUIAlnAA - UhlNA.
He Gives His Most Offensive NatIOna
Traits an Airing Before 4 Mandarin
A correspondent now in China re
lates the following episode episode 10
\ high Chinese official: -l.Htr
The mandarin we called on was tall
and thin with fearful black eyes, and
had guards at his door like a com.
mander in European armies. He ne,
/ Ieeived use cordially, but with a naughty
air, and called tea, rice, oranges, ,liehes
and walnuts, with various bowls
plates and chop sticks. The agree
ment had been made between Us BY
1 which Lem was 70 say nothing unless
spoken 10. But he broke his Tf0mise
and the enjoyment of the fsIs- bv
mOnOpOlizing nearly all the time,
I with odd questions that only he could
think Of The Interpreter was n good
natured fellow, and did lOt wish to
offend Lem, whose quiZzing was new
/ ertEeless q bore. Lem wanted know if
Hon. Mr.. Mandarin ever smoked
Virginia tYistw The mandarin uev-
er had: so Lem gave him a pipe full
from his Tobacco box.
! Did the mandarin have two wives ?
were his children ever sick? wasn't
the measles thick here in May 2di ln't
the figs grow wild hereabOut? where
was he born? hadn't he ever thought
/ the Chinese had "A cussed mean way
of showing their smaFtnesS2 did he
ever play on banjo or a pianileS?
how would he like to live in Amerioa
and where did the old chap live that
"Tun this ere prOvinee" And n hun
dred other questions, all of which the
mandarin answered with dignity. At
ter while | improved an Oppertuni-
/ ty to ask the mandarin IL he had read
any OF the translatiOns from English
authors, religious or otherwise? He
said he had read q part Of our Bible
and was going on 10 say something
I else after the Interpreter should have
| reported that to us, but Lem broke in
just then and rs near as I can reeolr
lect the following conversation occur
red
Lem-''FelI the Hon. Mr.. Mandarin
that this chap (pOinting to mel pre-
tends to bo a literary feller and writes
for the press"
Mandarin-'I am glad to hear it.
True greatness is shown by scholastic
accomplishments" g-...,.
Leni-''Tell the old fellow that
America has a cussed lot Of such fel-
ows, and little store do the people put
by 'em nutller. They would be some
pumpkins in China, suppOsem
Here the interpreter was obliged to
be prompted on the meaning Of the
term ''sOme pumpkins"
Mandarin-"Yes great men in Chi.
na pass examination for literary
standing, and have diplomas
Lem-''I be cussed ffI ever saw a
Chinaman that knew beans.u
Interpreter-"What do you mean
by beans?n .t ..-.
Lem-"DOn't you know what beans
is, you fool? They grow in China
The interpreter here told the man
DARN either what Lem said or some
thing else, which evidently displeas-
ed him, and he looked very cross for
moment and then said, "Chinaman
may know more than Mr. Mellican
thinks" Lem saw that he was tread
ing on dangerous ground, and so to
mend matters he only made them
worse by saying that he was 'only
foOling.n r ..- Hs ar.. .tif .
That was the last drop in the YES
sci already too full, and at the idea of
Lem trying to fool him, the manda-
rim burst out i'm a fit Of anger, seized
a tea cup, gave some orders to the
servants, and jerking his hat from his
head, dashed out of the room in a
tremendous hurry. The servants
gathered up the dishes of fruit and
tea and left US all alone in the audi-
ence room Of the mandarin's yamun,
not knowing but what our heads
would be demanded TO appease the
anger of the Chinese official. At the
suggestion OF the Interpreter we took
our hats and walked out unmolested
and rather hastily made our way to
the European stores on the wharves.
Lem, when seOlded him for his be-
haviOr, said that he thought "the old
fellef was mighty particular" and he
would not admit that he had behaved
indecOrOusly. r......r..,i.