The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1870-06-04
WIT AND WIgDON.

WIT AND WISDOM.
IT . with narrOw-sOuled people a. with
| nazsDw -necked bottles-they less thev have
ln them, the more noise .thaF. make about
pouring tout D.
A roUse lady IN town who was boastine
tqf Der teeth, was asked if they were natural
! Or artificial. I e Neither = was tie reDlv
they are guth Percha"
.ABeUSG physicial aaksa p@minuiOn of
"a lass AoI kiss hsr. She replied, mo mir
II seTcr IKE = doctors bin stuck in INV
face.r sf. s. .
BIZ careful how You mortgage 70 The
devil He notes are all payable ON de-
tnand, add there is no telling when be
make take noeion % foreclose.
A LADY wished seat A portly hand
some gentleman brought one and seated
TIE lady. "Oh! you're 4 Jewel" aid
she. "'Oh no." 6e replied. al ann A
jeweler; fhavs inserted the jewel"
A WISCONSIN, editor was called out Of
Sed, zoe nigAA 70 receive Subscription.
After that hs sat up nights for over q week
but that Ufsuse wasn't repeated.
+" WHY do you walk, Bob, when you
have got donkey to ride n said pentle
man to On Irish lad who was walking by the
side Of bis donkey. I" "Shurs, then, " said
!he boy, "1'm just walking to rest my
legs"
TaREE things q lady cannot do. She
cannot pass millinery store without stop
Plrg She cannot see pieC . Of lace with
out asking the price. s. She cannot see n
baby without kissing It.
As Doctor Dwight once passed through
z region Of very poor land, be- said to n
farmer " Sir" I see your land here 10 not
very productive. "No, sir," said The
honest farmer, A" Our Land in just liks eelf
righteousness" How 10 that?" WHY,
the more man has Of it the poorer be in
WV SAID q. Baptist to o Methodit: al
dcnt like your church gOvsrnment. II
isn't simple enough There's two much
nachineFy about j." 1T IL true" replied
the Mathodia, " We have more machinery
thR ycu y bu then, you Gee, il don't take
near soIhuch water 10 run n"
" NEAN iSw1P1 .ouce called upon lady,
who rsjoicedi to have: such n guest, with
much 'eagsrness inquired what be would
have for dinner.
"Will yOu have an apple pie, or goose
berry pie, sir; Or cherry pie, or plum
pie, or pigeon pie p The Dean aid be
would rather have any kind Of pie than
pagpipe. ...'.
A YOUNG lady in GaIesburg. having set
her cap for rather large specimen Of the
opposite sex, and having failed to win him,
was telling her sOrrows to . couple Of con-
idents, when one Of them comfcrted her
with these word
Never mind, MoIlie there are a. good
ash M ttNFsa ag ever.were esught."
Mollie knows that" said her little
brother, g but she wants Z whale p
6@eGEing TO do. You can study when
you are not ut work with your hands.
Every work of God has lesson upon it for
your mind 10 master. You can walk the
street and pick up pieCs Of paper being
tossed about by the winds, and upon that
piece Of paper viii be lessons for you to
learn. Never be idle when you can find 30
much work to do. r.3I -'
The ScHOwing are alphabetical assertions,
briefly collected. describing elegant Airta-
tiOns, generally happening in Joking, kissing.
larking, meTymaking, nutting, opportunity,
producing queer rumpuses, Smalltalk under
vclks' window, 'xCiting youthful zeal, etc.
ArsAnr asssd Amyss aKscsion,
Bets being DeDjAwn's bride,
Cteily eue OhnFloS oUunecttou,
Deborah Dlckey denied
ekanovS eye, emcaG ,uP,
Fredericks fatality 1eeisl
0ihss gMimsa Gecgwimnm- GOOD grneiOual
Harry hates Hdan's high heels.
IeMne 10 IBabeI's idol,
Jenny jeers Joaathan jones;
Ksth~rIne knocks knock -kneed Kit Krieaal,
Love lseFing Lncy's long -bonss.
Macy meetn mortincAtions.
NlchoAAe Nancy Dsgiecta.
divers odd ohoerv1tions
RIovss H PstsE H.P poor Paa'y PsSIsstsl
Red hmehelh rmaDon'B FealBs;
eoh Bimons sympsahy Bcrbhles
rI EAlesso tell fsb&Ay fWise.
Urls nnshinklng undoiDg
vSlsa n talsnenes vess-
wTlMmh Wild wickeder wooing
'Xceeas Youthful Zelica'g EeN.