The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1870-07-01

you all the property have got, before
L would seem ungrateful. Now this
windingsheet is kind of sweet
thing in its way, if you would like to
--. No? Well, just as you say, but l
wished to be fair and liberal-there's
nothing mean about me. Goodbye,
friend, must be going. may have
good way to go to-night-don't know.
l only know one thing for certain, and
that is, that am on the emigrant trail,
now, and I'll never sleep in that crazy
old cemetery again. 1 will travel till L
find respectable quarters, if 1 have to
hoof it to New Jersey. All the boys
are going. 1t was decided in public
conclave, last night, to emigrate, and
by the time the sun rises there won't
be bone left in our old habitations.
Such cemeteries may suit my surviving
friends but they do not suit the remains
that have the honor to make these re-
marks. My opinion is the general
opinion. If you doubt it, go and see
how the departing ghosts upset things
before they started. They were almost
riotous in their demonstrations of dis
taste. Hello, here are some of the
-, and if you will. give me lift
with this tombstone L guess / will join
company and jog along with them
mighty respectable old family, the
-, and used to always come out in six
horse hearses, and all that sort of thing
fifty years ago when L walked these
streets in daylight. Good bye friend"
And with his gravestone on his shoul-
der he joined the grisly procession drag
ging his damaged coffin after him, for
Notwithstanding he pressed it upon me
so earnestly, l utterly refused his hos
pitality. | suppose for as much as two
hours these sad outcasts went clacking
by, laden with their dismal effects, and
all that time l sat plying them. One
or two of the youngest and least dilap-
idated among them inquired about
midnight trains on the railways, but
the rest seemed unacquainted with that
mode of travel, and merely asked about
common public roads to various towns
and cities, some of which are not on
the map now, and vanished from it and
from the earth as much as thirty years
ago, and some few of them never had
existed any where but on maps, and
private ones in real estate agencies al
that. And they asked about the condi
tion of the cemeteries in these town
| off a hn ,taf n.
citizens bore as to reverence for the dead
This whole matter interested mt
dc eply, and likewise compelled my
sympathy for these homeless ones. AnC
it all seeming real, and l not knowing
: il was dream, | mentioned to one
shrouded wanderer an idea that hat
entered my head to publish an accoun
o f this curious and very sorrowful exc
dus, but said also that could not des
, cribc it truthfully, and just as it occur
, red, wit hOut seeming to trifle with
+ grave subject, and exhibit an irrevel
ence for he dead that would shock ant
distress their surviving friends. Blu
this bland and stately remnant of
former citizen leaned him far over m,
gate, and whispered in my ear, ant
said:
"DO not let MGt disturb yOu. Th
community that can stand such grart
yards as those re are emigrdtiRg iron
can stand anything q body can sag a6ou
tile n neglected and .JorSaken dead that Ii
in Nem."
At that very moment n cock crowed
and the wierd procession vanished ant
left not a shred or bone behind
, aWoke, and found myself lying will
, my head out of the bed and "sagging'
| downward considerably-a position
favorable to dreaming dreams wit
morals in them, may be, but not poetry
MARK TWAIN.