The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1870-06-10
SUNDRIES.

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{ himself
"I have the best wife in the world
said a long suffering husband; "she
always strikes me with the soft end of
the broom"
An Iowan gave his wife $1,000 to keep
safe during his absence. She got an
, other fellow to help her, and they have
kept it so safe the husband can't find
it, nor them either.
A York State girl of spirit couldn't
stand, her fathers reprimanding her, so
she placed herself beyond his iurisdic>
ton with bed-bug poison.
| ALouisiana lady tried to fill lighted
kerosene lamp, the other evening, and
now mOurns the loss of her two young
children.
The anatOmist who has discovered
new muscle in the human body has ta-
| ken out a patent, and no one can use
the muscle without paying royalty.
A Western man Obviated all neces-
| sity for divorce, by advising his wife
to light the fire with kerosene. He
| thinks q divorce would have been
cheaper, as the stove was blown up
| and ruined.
| An Indiana husband advertised his
wife as "leaVing his bed and board"
! and then applied to her for a loan of a
dollar and a half to pay for the adver-
| tisement.
Two boarding school girls, about to
| leave for their homes took poison to
| avoid separation. Being resuScitated,
each accused the other of trying to de-
ceive, and they became bitter enemies.
Paper napkins for table use have just
| been introduced into the restaurants of
| Germany. They answer for every pur-
pose for one using. Three of them cost
| less than a cent.
In speaking of raising corn on "Eclay
| lands" in Georgia, a correspondent of
| the Southern CLILtjUdtOr estimates the
| average crop, including good and bad
years, at ten bushels an acre.
Two girls, named Bennett and Locke,
aged about 10, have formed a partner
ship and purchased a good farm in
Warren county, Indiana. One of them
attends to the house, and the other
bosses the farm. They are said TO
getting along nicely.
ne of the most singular patents ever
q is one to Hartford man for a
<te of " elongated pad plates and
Unstable elastic bands, for securing
lie features of deceased person in
Sheir natural position"
At the vote on the new constitution
Illinois, the ballots are to consist of
es of the same, the voter cancelling
ink or pencil clauses of which he
not approve.
ben. Bolt has been convicted of muir
der in the second degree, at Cecil, Md,
and sent to the State prison for eighteen
years. This is not the one to whom the
cOnundrum was prOpOunded in the
song.
A c,oD+Io,,,o,, 81 C,I,o-Joe Ct;tv, Tc,,,,
sent seventy-five cents to New York,
recently, for q method of writing
without pen or ink. He received the
following inscription, in large type, on
a card: Write with a pencil"
A Colorado paper asserts that dog
which fell down an unOccupied shaft,
a distance ofseventy feet, and remained
there fOrty-three days, was taken out
last week alive, though nearly starved.
In a1;onnecticut town the other day,
as or of a church was walking up
ting good brother came out of
- hccOsted the good man, to in
he didn't Warnt some good
5utter."
stated that Notwithstanding the
he climate of Brazil is so damp
Us necessary to air ones wear
lrel every few days to protect
IN mildew. Boots left stand
waTmest place in a room for
NJ s will be covered with blue
mould. The houses, however, with all
this dampness, are uncOmfOrtably hot,
but at the same time healthy.
A reverend gentleman in the Afford
district, Scotland, who habitualIy exer-
cises O kindness to birds and animals,
receives a daily visit from a robin red
breast. The other day the bird as usu-
al entered his apartment, hOpped on to
a book in which he was writing, and
seized hold of his pen, holding it till
writing had to be given up, and some
attention paid to the little visitor.
Here is a sermon short enough to sat
isfy any one. The most busy mortal in
this most busy age can find time to
read it. But to fathOm its significance,
will require more time and profound
thought than fall to the lot of many in
dividuals. The clergymen cost the
United States So, 900, 900 annually; the
criminals, $4O,OOO,0O0; the lawyers,
$50, 600, 600; Intoxicating beverage, to
satisfy and increase deDraVed al petites
$500,O00,O0O.
Patrick Henry left in his will the fol-
lowing important passage 81 have
now disposed of all my property to- my
family; there is one thing more lavish
l could give them, and that Is the Chris
tan religion. If they had that, and
had not given them one shilling, they
would be rich; and if they had not that
and ] had given all the world, they
would be poor"
THE FUTURE PRICE OF COTTON
The time bids on cotton for the next
October are about nineteen cents, show
ing a strong conviction OH the part of
the spectators that cotton will rule for
the next crop below twenty cents. The
day for a close economy, therefore, has
come. The planter who goes on the
big figure in the way of corn and meat
buying next year will make a short
trip of it. So asserts the Rome Ga,
Courier.
"Jake," said a blooming young lady
at Versailles, Ind, to her lover, one
Sunday evening, "ifyOu mean business
by coming here twice a week, / want
to know it, and if you mean fun, I'd
like to know it, for rVe just had an of.
fer from another feller, and shall take
take him up in two days if you don't
pop" Jake "poppedn - instanter, and
the wedding day was set.
Recently, Captain Mason, of Way
| Key, Florida, was standing OH the
| porch of his hotel, when an elderly lady
came out of the building. The rain
had been falling, and consequently the
middle of the street was wet. "I