Clarksville chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 186?-1872, 1870-05-07
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

A sHuRE kure for burns; inshuf.
ents.
"GIvE the devil his DUE" but he
careful that there amt much due him
Why is a cows tail like a swans
bosom? Because 1t grows down.
IT Is easy enuff to raise the devil,
but he's hard crop tew reap.
WHAT man gains In cunning he
alwus lozes in wisdum.
WHEN a man gifts burned out mis-.
teeriously its sign he's well inshur-
THE man who kant cit ahead with.
out. pulling Others back Is u very lin.
tied cuss.
] KAN tell exactly how mi nabors
young ones ought tew he fetched up,
but amt so clear about mi own.
A WAC proposes to publish q new
paper called the Comet, with an orig
nal tail every week..
1T was Sydney Smith who said,
philanthropy is a universal sent
ment OF the human heart; whenever
A sees ID in trouble, he always wants
c to help him."
LISTEN tew every mans opinyuus,
disagree with none but confide In
yure own. This liz a kind ov fiattery
that wrongs no one.
IT don't take much tew prove n
truth. 1t Is only lie that requires
CRATE argumentiff ability.
"Hurry, mama,n said a little ino-
cent with his finger cut hurry it's
leaking"
A WOMAN who neglects the buttons
ON her husbands shirt front, Is not
the wife Of his bosom.
THE eye-lash of q pretty girl is the
only lash that man does not object To
have laid on his shoulders.
Thare is sum folks in this world
who spend their whole time hunting
after Righteousness, and haint got en-
ny spare time tew praktiss it.
An old gamekeeper says that with
out the dear ladies we should be In n
~s,"sN Va SeV6 -hotiohs ....
THERE is cotton factory at Waco,
one at BastrOp, and several in con-
temptation at different points In
Western Texas.
A WESTERN orator, speaking of
the battle of Bull Run, said; "The
federals run so fast that the hard tack
ratified In their stomachs like beans In
a sheet-iron pan"
INITIATE the example of the loco
motive. He runs along, whistles
over his work, and yet never takes
anything but water when he wants
to "wet his whistle"
L WON'T do tew stir up man when
he IL thinking any more than IL will
u pan of milk when the cream is ris-
ing.
HE who won't believe ennything
he kant understand, amt 50 wize az a
mule--for they will kick at a thing
they don't expekt tew reach.
AN old negro preacher In the West,
preaching against money, concluded
his sermon by saying; "And finally,
yOu JuugC vi WIldL NIOtl
thinks of money by tile class of peo-
pie He gives it to-" )t..,.t.
An editor thus ludicr0usly describes
primitive church "No velvet
cushions i'm our pews; we don't go In
for style. The latest person has the
soltest seat, and takes 1t out with
him at the close Of services"
"WHY do you call me Birdie, my
dear?' inquired "a wife to her hus-
band. Because was the answer,
"you are always associated in my
mind with bill.".
To BEAuTIFY THE TEErH.-Dis-
solve two ounces of borax In three
pints of boiling water, and before 1t
Is cold add one tea-spoonfil of the
spirits of camphor, and bottle for use.
A tablespoonful of this mixture,
mixed with AN equal quantity of tepii
water, and applied daily with soft
brush, preserves and beauties the
teeth, extirpates all tartarous adhe-
sion, arrests decay, induces healthy
action of the gums, and makes the
teeth pearly white. V.H1.
A PROMINENT grocer of Indianapo-
lis, Ind, Augutus +. Coors, got a d.
vorce from his wife six or eight
months ago, and married again. His
second vile, u young lady from all ex-
cellent family, coming home from
her parents a few weeks ago, heard
that the first wife had been back. =
She In turn got a divorce, and COors
got a license few nights since and
married his first wife again.