Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1870-06-29
PEPPER PODS.
BY JOSH KILLINGS.

III you nav got spirited ana noble
boy, appeal tew his generosity; if yu
hav got a heavy and sullen one, ap-
peal tew his back.
A CRATE menny ov our people go
abroad tew improve their minds who
hadn't got amy minds when they
wazat home; knowledge, like ehari-
ty, shud begin at home, then spred.
Affiiekshuns are the compliments
that heaven pays tew the virtuous.
Nobody but phool will spend his
time trieing tew convince phoOl.
Time is like money, the less we hev
ov it tew spare the further we make it
go.
The tongue il really a very fast
member Ov the body polite; he duz
all the talking and two thirds ov the
thinking.
There IL menny person who kan
set a mouse-trap tew perfeckshun,
but, not satisfied with such small
game, undertook tew trap for bears,
and git ketched by the bears. Moral
Study yure genius, and stick tew
mice.
"Let him go, mi son." said an an
cient father to hiz boy, who had caught
yung rabbit, ''and when he gifts big
ger ketch him agin.n The boy did az
that rabbit ever since.
The world owes all its energys and
refinement tewluxurys-digging roots
for breakfast and going naked for
clothes, IL the virtewOus innocence Of
a lazy savage.
Thare il lots Ov folks who eat well,
and drink well, and sleep well, and
yet are sick all the time-theze are the
folks who alwuz enjoy poor health.
A person with little smattering of
learning IL a good deal like a hens
egg that has been sot on a short time
and then deserted by the hen-it is
spite for Matching out ennything.
People of good sense" are those
whose opinyuns agree with ours.
Thare IL a great deal of magnificent
poverty in our big eitys-peOple who
eat klam soup out ov tin basin with
a gold spoon.
The place whar poverty, virtew, and
luv meet and worship together IS the
most sakred spot in this universe.
Experience don't make a man so
bold as it duz careful.
Pride never forgets itself, never has
a playspell or frolik; it IL stiff from
morning till night, from top tn bot
/ tom like a sled stake.
Thare amt but very little ginuine
good sense in this world emmy how,
and what little there IL ain'tin market
it is held for dividend.
Those who have made up their
minds tew lead a life of enjoyment
viii find the following recipee CRATE
help to them: ''To one ounce Of plez-
ure add a pound of repentance"
Adyersity IL poultess which redu-
ces our vanity and strengthens our vir-
tew-even a boy never feels half 50
good as when he haz been spanked
and sOt away to cool.
Pedantry liz the science Ov invens-
tin what little you know in one kind
NV perfumery, and insisting upor
sticking that under every mans knOzC
whom yu meet.
Iieing is like trieing tew hide il
a fog, if yu move about yure in dang
er NV humping yure he'd agin TIN
truth, and az soon az the fog blow:
Oph yure gone anyhow.
Marrying an angel ~ the poetry OF
marriage, but living with her IL the
proze, and that is all well enuff if the
taste ov the poetry hain't spite oul
relish for the proZe.
The man who lives on hope mus
pick the bones Ov disappointment.
The devil il sed to be the father OI
lies. If this IL so, he haz got large
family, and q CRATE menny promising
children amung them.
Life IL like mug ov beer, froth a.
the top, oil in the middle, and sett
lings at the bottom.
We should liv in this life az tho we
war walking on glaze ice, liable to fal
at emmy moment, and tew be laffed al
bi the bystanders.
Men, if they amt too lazy, live sum
times till they are so, and destroy the
time a good deal eZ follows: The fust
80 years they spend throwing stuns Al
mark; the second 80 they spend ex.
amining the mark tew see WHARF the
stuns hit, and the remainder IL divid
ed in eussing the stun-throwing biZZi
ness and nussin the rumAtizz.
This settling down and folding oul
arms, and waiting for something to
turn up, IL just about az rich speku.
lation as going out into 400 acre lot
setting down on a sharp stone, with 8
pail between our knees, and waiting
for COW to back up and be milked