Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1870-02-25
at least four times day, excepting
I n 10

| " 'oaa ehSo " uayt excepting
cider.u
According 10 recent estimate
the population OF the globe ia .22s,-
o00,ooO souls. or this number 552.-
900 900 belong to the MongolIan race;
$50, DOC, 900 to the Caucasian 100 ,Ooo.-
600 to the Ethiopian; 100000 to
the Malay, and 100000 the Indo-
American race. The annual mortal.
ity is over 81, 900 600.
"A major In the United States
army Was crossing from England I'm
one OF Cunard steamers, when one
afternoon hand ON deck played
Yankee Doodle. A gruff English
man who stood by enquired whether
that was the tune the old COW died
of. Not at AL, retortcd the major,
that is the tune the old Bull died
OFF,
"A lady In Leaven worth has writ
ten to a town In Missouri that she IL
"lectorin on the influence and duties
OF woman" and would like to ''lec-
tor for the benefit of the church or
Sabbath-school, or any Individual In
that town for $50, or for one. half, at
6fty cents a ticket" She asks her
correspondent to "please rite aud let
her no what can be dun about it.n
The contract has been let for tho
building Of the Lafayette, Muncle
and Bloomington railroad, froh, Ia
fayette to the Illinois line. The price
paid is $500, 900.
Real estate In VermiIlion county
has advanced from twenty-five to
one hundred per cent. since 1t has be-
come a certainty that two railroads
are to pass through the county.
Women who want to vote will
be interested to know that the fol-
lowing speech, delivered In the Wyo-
ming legislature, Was the clincher
that caused the passage of the law
which accorded them the right to
vote. A member rose and said
Damn 1t, If you are going to let the
niggers and pigtails vote, we will
ring In tho woman, too" And they
were Immediately "rung. In"
--Matrimony is-hot cakes, warm
beds, comfortable slippers, coffee,
round arms, red lips, kind words,
shirts exulting In buttons, redeemed
stockings, bootjacks, happiness, ect.
Single blessedness is---sheet.iron
quilts. blue noses, frosty rooms. leo
IN the pitcher, ungenerated linen,
heelless stockings. coffee sweetened
with icicles, gutta- percha biscuits,
rheumatism, corns, coughs, cold din
heis, colics rhubarb, and any amount
of misery. U
AT a party given at the house Of
some young ladies the other evening,
a young man and an old gentleman
seated near each other were yawning
so that the jaw bones were In danger
of disloeation. 'Ars you having q
good timer" asked the young man.
me? not at all.lv "Let us leave
then," replied the young gent. are
gret to say I can't" replied the elder.
/ am master Of the house, and of
course must see the thing out IL 10
kills me.n
The Philadelphia bulletin thus
describes Mark Twain's pedigree:
Mr.. Twain's real name Is Wampau-
tellimacgiaberty. He was converted
by Bohemian priest named O'Cal-
lahan. He speaks the English Lam
guage fiuently, firmly believes that
George Washington was an Irishman
who discovered America, and was
rescued by Pocahontas from an aw-
ful death on Plymouth Rock, after a
periious voyage I'm the Spanish Ar
mada, which he saved from ruin by
cutting down a mast with little
hatchet which had been given him
by his father, who perished In the
storm, and so could not give bis son
permission to leave post which the
heroic boy firmly refused to forsake
without his fathers orders.