, 1870-06-19
T1T-BITs.

TlI-BITS
A rssea11r b,eha,,.
two women d oST-.ea Gaas the friendship OF
WHY is. wo-n4ont p.os against third"
Dec,r,sa = nrca -. s19e nke ancient Greece:
The London co eor1esn@na = soaon ssols en,.
! | nati Hozss. ssa 1oilesPonoens OF tho Circin-
Tnths;- s45 Ne ls AFRAID the author OF
ruile ' ''so'1 1en'e IN whom there Is no
-Tpou tina r,.n;,,o -,
inns 1;t,ia ~ ilaSe o. one OF her compan-
esmo schonI s,;d 1oIso hst - seats OF age, Of the
Won tbinE Anal. :; 3 us. pssGhss, Mig. don't
gone tmorgh fractions yet 2"
vest rhe heIus,ous st..; w N public sehool out
nanti,. Ir VIZ ssos hsh IN geography, Was ra-
ioe,teJ T. - n-nti1 n.s .gacnat where Africa ''as
the United statee tso""ptis answosed' "tn over
ftnen thsnks that tenors who strive after
laval r.n ~ - 3r Hoafsne ~ may properly be nick
nA'aeu ss Lne 1oikTs Of ne G.
Ill. ". oresser; straddle that blind" was
,ne Intase u Which pokes-playiug California
5aIGl "a iIiudea desonaea nqnTsf1' the motion;
sstd "'sd fW n1Ner, wife, though she has thou
sshd fsnits.
nv ~ yMsa -, Gnafen TO have private boxea.
OS+ ~ way OF keeping ass congregation out Of tha
| PIT,
| a Western obituary notice closes bv say
ing: she had m amlahla temper. aud was ui,-
commonly fond Of ice cream and other lenca-
/ c1esi
,.;,:. The Nation i reminded by the Theological
Iarkers rcM,1k to fuuatic. The tuust1c mei
him and warned him Of the apuroachinc and
imminent destruction and total collapse of the
nnlvefse. oh that don't affect me- sid
Pa1ker, ~ I've IN boston
Charles kean said bad horse WIS like .
poor play it cail't run aud won't draw
a teacher. wishing to explain In a E,t1,
shell when it has outcrovn IL sail .vTI,,+ T o
you do when you have outgrown your = 'oti ~?
replied the littla one. sWo iet n,tt t,,e ,n.ts.
Said a yourgstef in high glee, disnlaviue
ms purchases to i bosom friend IN the side
walk Two cocoanuts for ton cents. That
VIII make me sick tomorrow, and l won't
have to 60 to school"
-Eiddle-de-lee: We have tliscorered f,on,
profound study OF Roman history, that tho
Emperor Nero. although ho p1ayaf tho yioiir,
very nicely willie Rome blazed, was little bet
ter than a fool fer doing it. IIo i to DO re-
Tho man in possession il always tic MIN
to respect. ! depuze replied to anotllar WHO
n: was s:. s:5tolipg i: OLIVER - IL j masSe1loas
superior" (which ones" ..Tls son ons t thai .
will succeed u. Olivier" Was the neat roply.
Il Scottish uobleman one dav visited a
lawyer 1t Lis Office in Which at tf,a Tina there
was blazing fire, which led him to cSclaim.
"MF; -, your Office is as hot az All oveu''
80 II should he, my Lord, replied tho lawyer,
A It IL here that make my bread"
Lawyers have ludicrous habit Of ileuti-
fyhg themselves with their clients Ly snoak-
ing in tho plural number. "Gentlemc,. of tLa
jury said n Western lawyer, " at tie momeut
INC policeman says le saw Us in the trap, l
VIII prove that We were locked up in the sta-
ton house, in state Of iuto1icstion,"
AS Adolphus said when Augustus ,,resent
ed him with mackintosh, Water proof Of
anection!'
pail OF water because It wa too hot to do snv
good.
A patient on tho point Of being ouer,ted
on by hospital surgeon, said to him treu,-
bling: "Oh, Loctof, I rely GU your address,"
- 1t is p = street, as usual absent!y au-
suit about seven pounds of bntter. Whom fte
Jury retired they took with than Tic butter.
procured some crackers, alto them together,
snu sn.io.. returned verdict OF "So cause for
-"Wen. my young gentleman, and how
would you Like your Eai1 cut:" .sOL- Iiko
pApa's, please-with d littls round hole at the
top"
-Diogenes being aaked, "Tha biting Of
which beast is the most dangerous. answerai
- II you moan wild beast., lis tic slaodcrers.
u tame ones, The dattcrers.'
lawrence Stearn, who never aspi1ed to the
reputation of special morality, once wrote
Inst eneqla e b1p nevGs drink t9 cannot a
second IN suffering and the third H'n IN repoate mt
ns'
e,a Gdafon s;'e vent TO SEQ somo
II the ereporters tells Of m instance Of g shock
:oniane. who bad San Francisco lady on his
am. l que saau 70 nm: arg net the aeals
ause creatures Charles "Oh" rep1iedha,
,sttatn uI noo4a see tne great eeal OF Aassaehu-
ssse1 Wrro,oeaors =, u.-.o., .,,
- -to!eesol .t =, OF Aaftlofu, said the ether
saught cold, perhaps.and he lay down on .
onnge and requested bis friend ". to knead
.nd rub him after the movement cure style.
{ oT ~ It sounds" said f. who was looking on
. hats nothing" eaid W.; ttHnit till ret to
''s hesd.
=" Ny son, said gentleman the other
morning to six-year old urchin, ~ wish you
o ,ongo 60 of an es17na to you5 granamothers
'ouse 's, f1da u !mPsssi6le, T2s the re-
lubr, and both play match to,dsy, tho enc
2 the morning and the other IN the afternoon
i've Ess,! me ioEsy cents Tor ban
Public ep1t7t is defined by the Boston
'hlch ia Likely to prove lucrative
Slender party (Hho ia not yerv coutorta-
lel." These street cars ought to charge by
;e1ght." Stout party lsharply} 80 Ah. Il they
I'D they would never stop to pick you up''
Hungry diner Trouble yon for some ,
aore bread. landlord. always eat a good
eal OF bread with mymeat." Landlord $50
see; sir! And good deal OF meat with your
read"
WHAT Ia the difference between au acci-
ent and misfortunes II your pressing
alor we're to fall into the riveE. it would be an
cG1QeDt: :: but. II ADT one were tn mil him
would be misfortune.
Why is pigs tail ike carving knifs7
secause it is follrsshed oyer ham
=" Remember who you are talking to, Sir"
aid an indignant parent to his fractious boy
am your father sir" Vol, who's to
lame for that" said Young inper'inepce;
pas.mho. use 1ns, did You ever see tbs c.tskn
~ LUZ. ,.z- h.;, .u
tight, atIectionate Little boy, in the matter Of
King cold "1ou know, my child" she said.