The Lincoln County herald., 1870-01-20
TERMs oyADytiR rIsiSo.

inferred fom the title eives him BY his
red-skinned companions. the English Of
which was big Drunk. But on his re.
turn to the companionship Of whi'e men,
when disgust had stated itself, Houston
reformed all that ga. .rt.- -..H.s
One Of the funniest epistles IN Hous.;
tons life was the "roprimand' business.
A member Of Congress said something
offensive on the floor Of the House,
whereupon Sam forgot the members
privilege of being abusive with impunity.
i!e violated the Constitution of the Uni.
ted States, called the offender to account
in another place for words spoken in
debate" and shook the State ia the per.
son Of . representative of the sovereign
people. Sam was arraigned at the bar
Of the House, aud sentenced TO be repri.
mauded by the Speaker. 1 forget the exact
words, but the language Of the third officer
Of the government was to this effect: "Mr.
Houston, you have committed . breach
of the privileges Of this House. am
directed TO reprimand you, and you are
accordingly rcprimanded." Exit Hous-
ton from the bar, none the worse for tho
operation. 90 assas aal
Houston occasionally spOrtcd q waist.
coat Of skin-whether deer's or pan.
theirs, forget-and this divided the at.
tention Of the town with the gorgeous
waist-coat Of Felix Grundy Mcconnell,
which last bit Of apparel was moulded
after the pattern Of Joseph's gift coat.
Occasionally Sam would enter the Sen.
ate 10 Mexican serape. These little
eccentricities Of dress we're not amiss in a
man Of six feet and upwards, finely pro.
portioned, and with the port and dignity
of the mythical Indian chief of romance
aad the drama. l sometimes think that
Forrest must have stud cd Houston with
great care before he undertook the part Of
Metamora. .sa-tr .,-'
Washington was very lively that ses.
sion. Beau Hickman was at his zenith;
Burton's Theatre was burned down at this
time; Cave johnson was diligently en-.
gagged IN saving candle.ends in the Post
) Office d. partment; Clay WAS laying pipe
for the Presidency, to be aid out 10 the
end by his own friends; Wllmot was
planning his "proviso )" the Mixican war
was in full blast, and the town full Of all
kinds Of inventors, adventures, schemsrs
and parlor colonels the Senate still
boosted such men as Calhoun, Webster,
Clay, Cass, Benton, King, Buchanan,
, Mangum, Hunter, Colquitt and Badger;
and Dixon H. Lewis was the terror Of
hackmen, and the wonder of several visi.
tors. ..... ...... .. r...
g.,
Ithas been lately discovered that Time
? will be no mower when he hangs up his
, scythe. - -.... -a,.,, ..,.
A man who married particula larl y plump
/ specimen of womankind, being o bit of a
' wag, told her one day that she filled the
measure of his matrimonial ioy tuH. for
/ she was beautiful, duti full, and an arm,
full 5...-.. s..r
A Beaver county (Pennsylvsnia) elder,
long ago, who was asked by the congre.
CATION to pray for rain, began his suppli-
cation to the Almighty with, I'VE would
mot presume to dictate, but would merely
D suggest ......' '......' .............,
> An Indianapolis councilman in recent
|. speech said "Any judge who would
issue such an order as that of Judge
: Hines Is jackass!'' Forgetting himself
a little further on, he added, sand L am
! tht peer of such man r. .. .,r.aoii
: A man and his wife stopped at Keo-
kuk hotel, where goldfish balls we're legal
9 tender. He broke one, tasted of it, and
Q thus addressed his partner: "Matilda,
don't eat them doughnuts, something has
4 crawlsd into this one and died" :
A young man in Lafayette, Ind, is
humility personi6ed. The Other day he
asked young lady if be might "bs al.
!, lowed the privilege Of going home with
y " her." and was indignantly refused !;
= whereupon he inquired very humbly y"if
!, he might sit on the fence and see her 20
= BY" . -1c -
9 A chap won't to pork house to buy
IL pork on credit. First be barga,ned for .
10 lot Of hogs ears next, the clerk seem
70 ing willing to trust, he bought q hogs
n head, then, growing bold, he said, III be.
lleve Ill take that ham" No you Won't
IS replied the clerk, you are head and ears
{, ID aeos now. ri eas .1dT
u A man on tho day he became one hun.
dred years old, went to have pair Of
Is shoes made, and remarked that be wanted
% them made substantial, with plenty Of
!, hob nails in them. The shoemaker OBJ
'r served that he might not live to wear
- such pair of shoes out, wbsrsat the cen
70 tenarian became quite indignant. avering
. that he started the second hundred years
70 good deal stronger than he did the first,
is Three conceited young wits, q they
10 thought themselves, passing along the
4. road near Oxford, met grave old gen.
K tleman, with whom they had mind ia
!. BE- rudeiy merry. "Good. morrow, fathe,
. Abraham" said one; "Good. morrow
re father Isaac" said the next; "Good'