Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1870-06-18
Why Aunt Sally Never Married.


why YOU never msiried. You know you
said once that when you were girl you
were engaged TO minister, aud you
would tell US all about it, sometime. Now
Aunt. please do
We'll, you see, when was living in
Utica, in the Stale of New York, though
| cay II myself, ! was quite good look
ing girl then. and had several beaux. The
one that took my fancy moe, was q young
minister. very promising young man,
and remarkably piOus and steady. He
thought great deal Of me, and kind Of
took fancy TO him. and Ihiugs ran on
ill we were engaged.
One evening he came 10 see mel re-
member it as well as if ii were only yes
lerday. When he came into the parlor
where ! was sitting alone he came up to
me snd-bu, now pshaw girls. dont
like to ;eil the resi- I..
oh, Aunt Sally, for mercy's sake,
don't stop tell US what he did.
We'll, as said, he came to me. and
put his arms around me. and rather
hugged NE, while got excited and some
frustrated, and il was long time ago, and
| don't know bot what might hueeed
back little. Then lell-bu, now ust
Gear out, every one OF you, shan'i tell
you any more
Goodness. gracious, no. Aunt Sally.
Tell us how you felt. Didn't you feel
good, and what did he do next ?
'Oh, such tormenis as You are I! | was
like any other girl, and pretty soon pre-
tended TO be mad about il, and pushed
him away, though | wssn't mad til.
You must know that the house where ]
lived was on one of Ihe back streets in
town. There we're glass doors in the
parlor, which opened right over The s'ree'
and no balcony or anything OF the
kind in front Of the house. As il was in
the summer season, these doors were
opened, and the shutters just drawn 10.
stepped back ltile from him and
when he edged up close pushed him
away again. pushed harder than | IN
tended 10, and don't you think girls, the
poor fellow los, his balance, and fell
through one of ihe doors into the street :
Yes, lis so. As he fell gave scream
and caught him-but declare | won't
tell any thing more. I'm going 10 leave
the room
No, no, Aunt Sally /! How did you
catch him Did it hurt him much ?
We'll, if muSi, must. lie fell head
first, and as he was going | caught him
by The legs Of his trousers. held on
for a minute and tried 10 pull him back,
bJ, his suspenders gave way, and the
poor young man fell clear oul of his pant
aloons into a whole parcel Of ladies' and
gentlemen passing along the street
'Oh Aunly, Aunty ; Lordy, Lordy (!
lie, he, he 20
There, that's right. giggle and squesl
as much as you wan, to. Girls that cant
hear abou, little thing like that without
tearing around The room and he.he.ing in
such awsy don't know enough to come
! home when il rains. A nice time the
10 an that ever msrres you will have won't
he
But Aun, Sally. what became Of him |!
Did YOU ever see him again J!
No; The moment he touched the
ground he got up and left the place in a
terrible hurry. tell you twas sight
to remember, TO see how the man did run.
Father happened to be coming up The
street al he time, and he said tina, he
never saw anything 10 equal it in his
whole lie. heard others say that he
did the tastes, running ever known IN that
part of the country and that he never stop.
ped or looked behind until he was two
miles out Of town. lie sent me note a
few days aflerwsrd aging that The en-.
gagement mus, be broken of, as he new
ef could look me in the face after whs,
had happened. He wen, ou, West and
believe he's preaching in Illinois. But
lie never married. He vas very modest
and suppose he was so badly frightened
that he never dared to trust himself near
a woman again. That's the reason girls
never married. | iel, very bad sbou. it
for long time, for he was good man.
and often thought that we should always
have been happy 3his suspenders hadn't
giuen ,cdy.