The Conservative. (M'connelsville, Ohio) 1866-1871, 1870-05-06
PARAGRAPHS
Local and Political.
Y A C 0 rRIBUToR R.
Country Cows VS.. Town Cows.


Some persons contend, and that too
with much plausibi 'ity, that there is a
marked diff renee between the town
cow and the country COW 1t is claim
ed that the country COW, is, in every
particular the superior o: the town
brute, both as tn quantity and quality
of milk, and as to "broughten up"
and good manners.
A late writer Thus describes and de-
lineates the appearance and peculiar
characteristics of the town COW. Let
any one carefully read this description
of the she demon of the village, and
then go out into the streets, and our
word for it, he viii find before him the
living and moving picture as she is
herein set 70. tn. >
"But by all m ans the she demon of
the village and third. class city. This
pc ann ulating labaatory of cerulean
fluid may be easily Diet c'ed by her
elongated horns, abreviat d tail, latter
ed ears, and othrr marks of dilapida-
ton aid crime. La her normal cond-
ton she is permitted to exist as a nec~
essary evil-fnr she i the p or mans
cow but on a farm she W. uld bank
rupt a proprietor and break his heart
in lie s than a week. For thoroughness
and swiftn"ss in her purpose she "wears
The horns and those crooked telegraph
pole affairs are the thing that do the
business. as a lock-picker she is a
success. During the day she wanders
about the streets and alleys, mastica-
ting rotten cabageS. oyster cans, old
pants and other luxuries; at night she
walks into a mans front yard, ticks up
his rose bushes and exotics, and in the
morning S ands outside the gate, chew
ing the cud of contentment as Innocent
ly a if nothing had ha. pened. When
so minded she unrolls a yard IF tongue
through a crack in the fence, and cleans
of every green thing that comes in the
way of that boa-constrictor. Sire cas-
enything, from a rotten ouion to a gun
ny bag. Dish rag and sat barrels Hre
her d light. She will follow a farmers
wagon for half a mile industriously re-
leaving the team of its burthen of hay
I'll the way. Persecution appears only
to strengthen her. A br ck-bat pro-
PEELED against her ribs apparently caus-
es a blessings nsation. Gunshot gla c.
es from her hide as hail from an Iron
clad; and e walks off with a bulldog
ha ging TO each of her Tugs, a. prou 'ly
an a maiden wear a pendants. She
would prove r gallant leader of the
drove az inst the farmers grain. No
fence would stop her devouring course.
Size would eat TEE Ia Is off the faYorite
hops s, and "eat her own head off q
d z n times in the course of a year
By some STRAIT gem, she would lead her
faithf followers upon the railroad
track, and through a miraculous escape
be the soc survivor to tie ] the sad tale.
As for craving milk cut of her old teats,
sou might almost as well attempt 10
squeeze gore from a turIip. She would
kick sparks f ON the bucket bail, and
abstain like a philo opher from shed
ding q tear over the spill d milk. Try
to f item her, ard she w'uld eat tie
corn cribs empty, and still be admira-
bly, suited for a hat-rack. D stroy her
prolOngated life and her mortal re-
mains would be fit only for mechan-
ical purposes, such as harness. rub
locks and car springs. Shun her as
you would the dead y upas or a psor
relation.