The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1870-02-12
Fun In the Convention.

oPutha'miS tnat makes them INC prey OF cIus-
tering and fostering flies. ........
Fun In the Convention.
The following is . report of the proceedings in
the Convention, ON Thursday Of last week, on
fer the sittings of the Convention to Chicago.
Mr.. Snyder offered the following resolution,
and moved its adoption. The Secretary read the
resolution, as follows:
"Res0lced, That q committee OF three Be ap-
pointed by the President, to make arrangements
with the Common Council of Chicago, to provide
suitable hall, free of charge to the State, for
the sittings of this Convention, and that as soon
as said hall is procured this body remove to, and
hereafter hold its deliberations in that city.
Mr.. Snyder. Nj. President, wish to offer
few reasons why that resolution should be adopt
ed. find that the city of Springfield, in the
first place, is not very sociable place. am not
very sociable myself; but like to get acquaint.
ed with people when come into town. 1 have
not get acquainted with more than half a dozen
friends since came here, and do not think
any other gentleman of the Convention has. I
find from the palatal residences in all directions
and the style that is put on, it has all the airs of
great city, and if taken according to its own
estimation, it would be very great one.
Laughter.
fnd it has one defect of every small place.
When was boy, great many years ago, trav-
cling tho circuit with my father, who was
lawyer, had occasion to visit some of the coun.
try seats of the back counties and remember
the terrible system of extortion that used to pre-
vail there. 1t was necessary that the inhabitants
should make enough to keep them until the next
court met, and 80 the lawyers, and Jurors and
witnesses were feeced most terribly. Bat that
was not the worst of it. Sometimes they didn't
make quite enough, and the next court had to
suffer for the arrearsges of the last one as we'll
as to pay the expenses OF the people during the
time intervening. [Lsughter.l Now, sir, 1
think there must have been some deficits in the
last Legislature that We are helping to make up.
Roars of laughter rr.H
Mr.. Cromwell in his seat. "Casual losses and
deficiencies" Merrim.nt
Mr. Snyder. find that common legal paper,
which can be bought almost any where else in the
civilized world for five dollars and half per
roam, costs in this town fifteen dollars. Common
wrapping paper, that could be bought anywhere
for four or five dollars per ream, is sold for thir.
teen and half to fourteen dollars. And all 9th.
er articles in proportion. L.
But the worst of it is the whisky ia a hundred
per cent. higher Renewed laughter And, sir,
you know that it is impossible for the Democrat
ic portion of this Convention to remain here un.
less they are supplied with the principal plank
in their platform. Prolonged laughter And
they will be compelled to 60 home and leave
republican rump, in this condition of affairs, to
take the State to perditlon. Laughter
Now, the republican members Of this Conven-
ton have another equally serious difficulty to
contend with. They are drinkers of pure,
limpid, COOL sparkling water. [Laughter.] They
abhor anything like Intoxicating drinks. Renew
ed laughter.l That is their theory, however but,
as is the case with many other theories, they
meet with considerable difficulty in reducing i
to practice. Continued laughter.
Now, when these Republican teetotallers come
here expecting to find the clear, pure water they
love 80 well, they are put upon Sangamon pond
water, and they sosn find 1t necessary to stiffen
their water with little Springfield whisky.
Shouts of laughter. This sir, causes them to
blush at this Abandonment of virtue to which
they have been driven, until some of them get to
looking as healthy and as ruddy as the Demo.
cratic portion of the House. [Uproarious laugh.
ter.
This practice to which allude, eventually be.
gets preternatural and abnormal state Of the
system, which think is dangerous, Some mem.
bers have actually contracted such an extraor.
binary gastric sensitiveness, that they become
intoxicated on Roman apples. Laughter. Now,
sir, this argues one of two dangerous conditions
of the stomach. One is, that the stomach il 40
sensitive, that the individual becomes intoxica.
ted upon the cider, before it is eliminated from
the apple. [Laughter.] The other is, that the
stomach is in such sour condition, that it fer.
ments the apples into an intoxicating drink.
Loud laughter. One of these two conditions
exists. Now, sir, in conclusion. l am for remov-
ing to Chicago where Democrats can have their
whisky at living prices, and Republicans will
not be compelled to adulterate their Sangamon
pond water with whisky. CONTINUED laughter.
Mr.. Turner. Mr. President: am some what
surprised at one charge the gentleman makes
the unsOciability Of Springfield. think can
prove to the Chair that the gentle
man is mistaken. If rember correctly, no later
than last evening, saw the graceful form of the
gentleman from st. Clair, Mr. Snyder moving
in the maze of the dance, in this very city Of
Springfield, surrounded by youth, beauty and
intelligence, and l am induced to think that
there must be little of that dangerous sourness
OF the stomach this morning, and he NAV have
forgotten the charming scene which he seemed
to appreciate 50 highly last night. [Laughterl
Mr.. Wright. Mr.. President: think the gen.
tleman has forgotten one thing in bis resolution,
and therefore offer the following amendment:
And that the Secretary of State be requested to
the Convention" Laughter
Mr.. Goodell. Mr.. President; would suggest
that it is necessary to have our Treasurer along.
Mr.. Truesdale Mr.. President: would sug.
yest AN amendment: "If the Conve .tion goes
to Chicago, it 90 on the Illinois aud Michigan
Canal"
Mr.. Snyder Will the gentleman from Bureau
Mr.. Whiting, act as conductor?
Mr.. Vending. Mr.. President: move to lay
the resolution upon the table.
Mr.. Chur,h, Mr. President: move to refer
that portion Of the speech of the gentleman from
St. Clair Mr.. Snydor relating to whisky, to the
on IternM improvement. [Laug hter.1
The President. 1t will be 10 referred. The