The Idaho world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1864-1918, 1870-06-30
THE JOSH BILLINGS PAPERS.
MARRIAGE.

Marriage is fair TRANSACTION on tnc iace
ov it.
But there is too often put up jobs in it.
IL Il is an old institution, elder than the pyra'
mids, and az phull OF hyroglifcs, that noDoddy
kin parse.
History holds its tongue who the pair wuz
who FIRST put on the silken harnis, aud prom
ised to wurk kind in it, thru thick and thin
up hill and down, and on the level, wet or dry
survive or perish, etsettery
/ But whoever tina wuz, tina must have made
good thing out Nv it, or SD menny OF their
posrerity would not hev harnissed up aud draw
| out.
There is CRATE moral grip to marriage; II
is the mortar that holds the social bricks To-
gether in the wall of order.
But there amt but darn phew phoiks who
put their mummy in matrimony who could set
down and give good written opinyun why on
earth tina cum to did it.
This liz q CRATE proof that it is one OF them
natral kind of acksidents that must happen,
| jist us birds fiji out NV the nest when thu have
feathers enuf without being able to tell why.
Sum marry for buty, aud never diskuver
thare mistake; this liz lucky.
SUN marry fur pedigree. and feel big fur SIX
munths, and then very sensibly cum tew the
knnclnshun that pedigree amt uo better than
skim milk.
Sum marry because tina hev been highsted
sumwhare else. this il u cross match. bay
aud n sOrrrl pride may make IL endurable.
Sum marry fur luv, without cent IN thare
pocket, nor friend in the world. nor drop
Nv pedigree This looks desperate, but It IL
the strength Nv the game.
Ii marrying fur luy amt o success. then mat
rimony liz ded beet
sum marry bekaws tha think wimmen Will
be scarse next year, aud liz Ia wonder how the
crop holds out
Sum marry tew get rid NV themselves. and
diskuyer that the game wux one that two could
play ut and neither win.
Sum marry the 2nd time few get even. and
fad il gambling game. the more tina put down
the less thu take up.
Sum marry tew be- happy. and not finding it.
wonder WHARF all the happiness gosc tn when
il dies.
Sum marry. tha kan, tell why. and live, .ha
kan'i tell how
Almost everybody marries. aud il is good
joke.
sum marry in haste, and then sci down and
think 10 carefully over.
Sum think II carefully over fasi. aud then
set down aud marry.
Both ways are right If iha Kin hi, the mark
It'll. risky. and IL takes u smart missionary
10 make the rifle.
sum marry eaquet,s. This IL like buying
poor farm heavily moTtgagsd. aud working the
balance of your dass 10 clear oph the debt.
Married lifr hax It's chances, and this IL just
what gives IL its flavor. Esrybody Laws io fool
with the chances. bekaws everybody expects
few win. But atm authorized iew ssalG that
cyrTy body don't win.
But. after all. married life ID full az scrt.n AZ
the dry goods hixxiaesA
No man han swaEn exactly WHARF b. will
fetch up when he touchr. kalico.
No man kan tell jist what kalico has made
up la mind tn du neat.
kallco don't kno rven herself
Dry goods oy all kinds IL the child oy cir
cumstagcis.
sum never marry. bat this IL jis; ~ risky
the disease IL the sasnc. with no other name.
The man who stands on the bank shiscrng.
and darescnt. IL more APT 10 ke,ch c"ld than
him who pitches bed fuss into The river.
Tharc 10 bat lew who never marry brkaws
tia roH't-thcy all banker. and most Of them
starve. with slices Of bread before them (wcll
spread on both sidcsl. jist for lack OF grit.
Marry yHHg' IL mt tnotto
I've tried it, and know what I'm saying
Ii ennybody asks you wh; yu got married (ifI
it needs beg, tell him ga dOa'i recoileci
Marriage 10 a safe wa tn gamble-if yu win
WI win pile, and IL WI luce yu don't LUCE en-.
nything, only the privilege of living dismally
alone, and soaking yure owu feet
repeat 1t. in italics. marry yHHg'
Tharc is but one good excuse for marriage
late IN life, and that ia second marriage.