The post. [volume] (Middleburg, Snyder County, Pa.) 1864-1883, 1870-12-08
Con Session Of a Patent Medi.
cine Man.

pcCtmDtE ANo' VI 'ut hftuHtC NON'"'
we make the extract /:
MY corn salve was made Of pstasl
and gum arrabic. 1t would do il,
work in five minutes, but. OF course
I made the foot outrage ously sore sf
terwsrd. This was q matter Of very
little inconvsn eucs to nus, because IN,
business required me to be moving
continually ron place to place
always managed TO get out Of town
ON the Anod tide Of my reputation a,
an effective cbiropodist II will b,
easily believed that | did not ac.
quiro my skill and self-relaucs, no or
operator, all at once. My corn salve
grew in my confidcsee from the fee,
it fed on. You think that is II qneer
expression ? You cannot, then, be
aware of the corrosive nature Of : OF
ash. Well, sir, experience and spc ,ii
knowledge arc everything in one,
business. will confess that | was
nervous before my 6rst patient The
salve had never been tried, aud q
friend told me l had better not
ny it. Bu, my subject wasa good
one, rather an aoomly, too, in LIE. |
think you hardly ever heard before OF
a poor shoemaker with corns. Tha,
describes my tirst patient. | muster
cd up courage ut last, and furnished
an old razor at him with quite pro-
iessional air for youth of !G. The
job was not as neat one as learnel
to do sitcrward, but still it gave tenn
porary satisfaction aud sold that
shoemaker two boxes Of the salve.
/ Aud thus | went about overa wide
extent ef territory, leaving know no,
what number OF sore feet behind me
| have no better idea how much more
pedal distress nigh. have work cd on
u cretuIous community had it not bean
tor an accident which, ut the end of a
couple Of years, overlook me in nv
career. | hal left great quantity Of
my salvc and lozeugers slowed away in
a town which was then making my
headquarters. They were carefully
packed ! remember, 10 neat paper
ooxes. On my return, alter su un-
usually long trip, found that the in
ierual potash had eaten up the paper
boxes, and, making its devouring way
to my cOugh,lolengers, and Involved
my whole stock in one agglomsrate
mass of ruin.
Out OF my temporary despair, how
ever, sprsng lucky inspiration. You
have doubtless heard much OF the
happy elasticity Of youth. There is,
| grant something available in that
but l found something = great deal
better for my business 10 the rapid
growth and physical changes Of that
period of my life. The fact is, had
grown and altered so in appearance
since | had frst stared out with my
corn salve, that, at the time OF this ap-
palling accident, no one Of my 6r.t pa
tients would have recognized me from
q mere surgical acquaintance Of two
years before. | may say here, in fact
that these repeated changes in my
physical appeaeauce, aided by the
coropping OF hair, or tho abandoning
Of it to excessive length, aud at lat,
by the coming Of the beard, were all
through by early experiences Of uu
told advantage to me. Thus in the
course OF time | became personally ac-
quainted with all the people who
could be duped in given region Of
country, and with every new project
or no.trun. returned unrecosuzed
to them, over aud over again. Now
out Of the potashes Of the agglomer-
ate ruin OF my entire stock in trade
sprang, PhGnix-liks, luckey ,nspira-
tiou, as | have before said, without the
present indifferent joke, which is alto
getner accidental. While contem-
plating my irrctriorable loss. cou-
csived the idea of patent pain killer,
which | would 20 about selling to cure
the sores left by corn salve.
Asa general thing money, or, |
should say, the want Of it, gets the
immoral work out Of first class brains,
] read the substance OF that remark in
II newspaper; or was It magazine 2
1t doseh' matter; l believe it, aud
verified it 10 the production Of fthat
pain killer; that's enough. Well, sir
the project worked to charm. l
commenced operations, OF course, in al
most the exact traces Of my former
chiropodal exploits, 1t was not long,
therefore, till came upon my first pa,
tient, the shoemaker. began eau
tiously to extol tho stomacic virtuel
Of my medicine, and gradually led up
to its external application. 1t was
good, | assured him, for bruises,
sprans-keepiug my eys,stsaltaily on
his, frsm under my hat, 10 catch any
faint gleam or recognition bruises,
sprains, wounds, sores
"On the feet p asked he, inter;upt-
ing me in my catalouge Of positive
cures.
"Ce, taiuly better for the feet thar
anything else"
"Wsll, l have sore feet, and that.
5 the TACT" "said tho Shoemaker. "Yor
see thers was . rogue Of Q fellow
. around here copls Of years ago cur
; lug corns, and he made my feet sore
. II l ever catch the villain l u use {
strap on HIM that's what I'll do.
Il l now felt sure, need scarcely add
q that my former patient did not recog
. 0ixs NE, aud SO ] cold him two bot
ties oil pain killer TO cure the sorss