Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1870-02-04

or its manifestation. You will detect u
cough, q hectic flush, n weakness in the
back, what Mr.. Robertson in his school
calls "a floating, or iainting, or q sink
ing, or swimming" Perhaps marriage
is patched up, when the young people are
not q whit better prepared to marry than
they were years ago, and perhaps with u
years ot life have been uuwisely spent in
q long delay that has nothing to show for
itself
There is no doubt but wise mother
will seek to take daughter from such an
unsatisfactory condition OF
affairs. She is not TO be thought hard and
worldly, II, with q prescicnt eye, she de-
tocts possible eutanglements and strate-
gically guards against them. She has n
wcll'grounded aversion and objection to
the impcCunious detrimental. Ii the mis-
chief is really done we advise her 10 make |
the best of things. We arc by no means |
certain, even If VIC put ourstl Ives into |
very hard and worldly attitude, that the |
rough.and ready method of getting rid of
an injudicious engagement by the simple
process Of breaking it Off is really the
best. The principle is that if girls can
not form long engagements without
upsetting themselves in this sort of way,
from forming long engagements. The
demurrer will be that the young lady who
bears this set of circumstances so i'll must
he = pale, colorlcss, thin, unsubstantial
character The reloinder is, that young
ladies, although we will not apply 10
them such uncivil adjectivcs, do, rs
rule, bear i'll the trial of long engage
ments Perhaps they would also bear i'll
the trials of wifehood and motherhood,
especially in chronic state of impecuni.
osity. 1t may be allowed, also, that there
are some bright, elastic natures, on whom
a long engagement has a positively invig.
Grating effect. The body of exceptions
which they furnish indicates the extreme
difficulty of laying down any general law
on the subject.
II we might venture TO frame gcncr-
alization Of any sort, we should say that
the long engagement which has
such an unsettling effect on the
lady, has frequently settling eff
feet on the man. 1t makes and
keeps him simple, and steady, and earnest.
If the lover is worth having, the lover,
one would almost think, would be worth
waiting for. The mother of course says
that the long engagement affords such
hazard that It will be broken off, and her
daughter, after wasting her best years and
best feelings, may be Tilted. Perhaps,
however, it Is an inaccurate use of Ian
guage to say that what is earliest is best
The argument merely cuts in a different
way also, that it may often save a girl
from an unworthy marriage. There is
certainly constant possibility of break
off, when the betrothal Is not, as in Ger
many, a solemn ceremony of the highest
publicity.
There arc certain people to whom an
engagement of marriage would be alto
gether forbidden If some sanction were
not given to the long engagement. The
| curatc in the church, the lieutenant in
the army, the clerk in the bank, such ami
able, domestic, well-educated, wellman-
lnered young people would mako such
satisfactory husbands, If only that vulgar
element of filthy lucre existed in sufficient
force. Strange that the mineral sub
stances of gold and silver should make
such difference to immortal souls But
they, too, are Gods creatures as well as
those who can afford to keep gig. They
may say that they fall in love and become
engaged, not because they keep banking
account, but on the simple ultimate
ground that they are human beings We
think that il would be difficult TO resist
this plea as O matter of legitimate argu.
ment. But q man cannot be both hare
and barrier. He cannot take broad hui
man ground in one direction and narrow
conventional ground in another direction.
He should not make an engagement in.
definitely long on the plea that he is the
creature of civilization. If he makes The
kind of engagement which is long, he
should resolve that it shall not be pro-
lot gcd beyond certain date.
4. al, L. 4
impctuosity, say that six months is quito
long enough, yet VIC think that the Ro-
man law was probably quite fair in per-
mitting term of two years, After that,
let the pair, il the pair have made up their
minds that, for them, marriage is the SUI
prcmc earthly good, get married al
any risk, Let them emigrate, keep 8
school, live in an attic, work with
their hands, go without sugar and
butter, let the lady make the bed and
lay the tablecloth, and the gentleman an.
swer the bell and black his own boots
Having made their Lighthouse in the back
woods of social life in their youth, they
will probably shake down into some good
thing before they have finished. But il
they arc people who fear Mrs. GTundy,
and who are nothing if they are not gen,
teel, they are hardly entitled to the danger
GUS luxury of long engagement.
The chief terrors that for the parent
birds surround along engagement arises
from the wretchedly mistaken views o
marriage that prevail among the majority
of women. Any one, we think, who at
tempts to take wide and impartial view
of life would find it extremely difficult t
give clear, unwavering note in favo
either of marriage or celi5acy. Whel
| l,n oh nUnnlU halunRnI W
cannot imagine why there should be sucl
morbid anxiety on either side. We Otter
think that a woman of liberal, refinet
tastes, fond of life, of society, of intellect
ual pursuits, makes disastrous eXchang
when she surrounds herself with multi
tudinous cares of life. Even if we tax,
the extreme case of those who must d,
something for their own livelihoo'
if they do not marry, there ar
still undoubtedly discoVerable equiva
, lents or consolation, Mothers an
daughters, for the most part, attach Al
exaggerated importance to marriage
They regard it as an end in.itself instead
of being, as 1t really is, means to al
end. Marriage is not life, but the acciden
of life Whether married or unmarried
whether engaged or not engaged, the &C
tive or the spiritual side of religion, intel
leCtual pursuits, soCial anu nanny Ci"iihs
the ties of friendship and relationship, th'
elevation and development ofone's nature
will make up the main substance of |
wise and good woman's life. Marriage
per Sc, ought not to be necessary for use
fulness or happiness, and certainly coulC
not alone confer them. When these be
nefcent energies are present, either stat
may be taken as God may send, and ever
a long engagement may be cheerfulll
borne, without the risk of either ridicul'
or compassionate PieGdAy Papers.
A LUDIcRoUs scene took place at the
Tuilleries on Christmas eve. There wal
to be children's party for the friends o.
J the Prince Imperial, and very tint
specimen of the Christmas tree. All wa
, ready, and the Prince thought he should