The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1870-11-15
OUR DUTCHMAN.
He joins the Sons OF Temperance and
Backslides.

BackslideS.
NAN you pellet dat great wonder ven
~ dell NIT you dat l didn't trinken
single trop of anyding stronger as tea und
milk for more ash apout a hole week
DE reason Of it Why dat ding ish SO vas
pecaus l ish now shoined init dat Son of
Temperance Society, und dat affair don't
allow no memper vot pelongs NIT it to
trinken no peer und whisky und such
kind Of dings. [ dinks you must be ex-
donished NIT me ven you hear dat could
do NIT out mine peer for so long dime
ash hole week. Yet still dat ish So
for Why ish it dat will undertook to te-
ceive you NIT a lie in a ding of dat kind?
[ dinks not
After | ish signed mine name town
init de pledge, und vas a memper NIT dat
temperance dings for few tays, l find
out dat de orter vas maken readic to
haben DER grand annual barade shust to
tantalize dem peer salune und de whisky
tealers drife. So pesure ven l hears
apout dat dings, I dinks it ish nodings
more den mine tudy dat 1 must durn out
NIT dat barade affair. Last Tuestay ish
de dime ven dat barade vas to dooken
blace, und ash didn't haben no more
den doc tays to got mineself readic in, l
vas haben plenty to do-Ipelief SO. Ven
Duestay morning comes arount, | tress
mineself ub NIT glazed cap und ledder
pelt NIT tin cup tied on-und pesure l
haben also mine best plack bair of ban
daloons on und White shirt. Den buys
den cents worth of round toenuts NIT a
hole in, and string dem on a wire to hang
arount mine neck. Dat dings ish for
eating purposes ven l ish marchen NIT
dat barade. know all apout how dis
ding goes, und pesure / understand how
to prepare, for dat's not de fursd broces-
sion vot durn out mit-und Why ish it
dat | didn't know Something's Veil l
guess so-ain't it?
Ven L pellet dat vas ash near readic
ash [ can got, startzen for Proad straus.
where dat durn out starts FROM For de
fursd half hour dat marching goes
blenty nice but ven hole hour was ub.
den pegins to got dry nit mine mouth
und for spite, de more | marchen de
de tryer | got, shust on ACCOUNT dat vas
in the line NIT temperance barade.
Den L pegins to got mad dat l ever
shoincd in NIT a ding dat Won't allow
man to drinken shust drife glass of
peer. | holt out for leetle While longer,
und den | can't stand dat dentation ash |
go past so many lager peer salunes Sol
dinks 1 can slip away from the rear end
of dat barade mitout anybody daken
nodice of me, SO ash | can sneak into q
beer blace and saw vot dime it ish.
goes into beer salune and 1 finds out
vot | wants; still dat makes me more dryer
ash before den every beer salune blace
where We go by NIT stopped in nit me,
und by de time L ish marchen NIT dat
barade odder half hour, L got SO tizzy
NIT mine head ,and crooked NIT mine legs,
dat ven I undertook to keep ub NIT dat
durn out in de rear, can't hardly do dat
Veil, dat Marshall leader comes pack
where L vas, for by dat dime blenty
beeples ish hollering pad dings nit me-
So dat Marshall dells me it vas peter,
for the sake of the orter, dat | will left de
line und go lay town somevheres undill I
soper ub drife. Now, ven l under
dook to convince him dat dar ish nodings
de matder NIT me, look arount, und dat
parade ish far away off. So dat Marshall
leaves me und runs away to catch ub
nit de line. Veil, so l dry to run to
catch up nit it to, only mine legs get all
tangled ub togedder, und | ish failed town
so hard ash | can't dell. Pesure pig
crowd gets arount, und | ish picked ub
and carried to a toor-step.