The Sweetwater enterprise. (Sweetwater, Tenn.) 1869-187?, 1870-02-24
Fun and Frolio.

Z Ill dIlu EIOIlC.
Can girls who tell fortunes at night, by
writing names on paper, be called SLAM
der-ess' mo.
A sufferer complains that squeaking
boots "murder sleep" in church.
What difference it makes whether you
put "Dr." before or after mans name.
Editors ought to live cheap-they got
"borod" fornothiug.
Josh Billings says Goldfish are better
than umbrellas to keep you dry.
1t is said-ironioally, porhaps-that
blacksmiths forge and steel every day.
A Norfolk paper says there is a man in
Norwich so ugly, that with six frowns he
can kill q bulldog.
"What is pride, my son2" "Walking
with cane when you amt lame, replied
the intelligent boy"
When is a lady like a warrior of the old
en- time! When she knows how to handle
cross beau (cross-bow).
Extract from the last French novel 4:
"Ihe countess fell back in deadly swoon
When she revived her spirit had fed"
"Did you know that I was herel" said the
bellows to the fire, "Oh yes, always
contrive to get wind to you," was the reply.
If lady were threatened to be kissed
by a gentleman, and she objected, what
place near the coast of France might she
name? Ushant.
A man in Wisconsin has invented a
pocket-stoye warmed by alchokol. We
have seen one Of them. It looks very much
like pint flask filed with brandy.
An old lady gazing with astonishment
upon an elephant in menagerie, asked
the keeper. "What kind of beast is
that eating hay with its tail!"
a Western paper contains two additions
to the English language. These are full
of accounts of how party "fostivitied''
recently, and of a trRl Of ''culpitress."
A wag, seeing door nearly off its hing
es, in which condition it had been for some
time, observed that when it had fallen and
killed some one it would probably be
hung.
A young gentleman, speaking of a young
beauties yellow hair, called it pure gold
"lt ought to be," quoth an old bachelor
cit looks like twenty-four carrots"
At highland hotel, the following u.
nique bill was presented to gentleman
whofad made few hours sojourn at the
establishment: "For eating yourself and
horse four and thripanse."
A boy who heard the quotation. ga
little learning is a dangerous thing" wish
ed to stop going TO school, because he was
afraid he should not live long enough to
get past the dangerous point.
A subscriber writes to an editor in the
West: 81 don'twan your paper any long
er." To which the editor replies, a
wouldn't make it any longer if you didit's
present length suits me very WE'LL"
A newspaper contains an account of the
production of anew play, and says the au
dience 'sat spell-bound. There were only
four persons present. One was deaf, ant
the other three were asleep"
A doctors wife once attempted to NOV,
her husband to tears, "Ann," said he
"tears are useless. Ihave analysed them
They contain little phosphate Of lime
some chlorate of sodium, aud that's all"
'You say that the prisoner stabbed th
deceased. Was It in the thorax, OF in the
abdomenW ''No, sir; it wasin the street
seed it with my own blessed eyes
s'That viii do. Call the next witness"
Ajudge recently stated, in behalf of
female witness whom lawyer was cross
] questioning as to he--age, that a woRal
has a right to be Of any age she pleased
/ because, if she stated herreal age, nobod
would believe her.
A good. .natured traveller fell asleep il
a train short time ago, and was carrie,
few miles beyond his destination. 'Pret
ty good joke this, isn't itl" said he to tn
fellow passenger. eyes, little too far
fetched,' was the rejoinder.
Before temperance societies came int,
fashion,, person who had very red fac
was one day rebuking his son for playing
With gunpowder "Gunpowder!" said he
~ will set my face against it," "0h, ia
ther, do not for the world !" answere,
his son; "if you do, we shall all be blew
up"