New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1870-03-24

4 the First, the Emperor throwing in the
population for gagniape; end AlgierE
having been annexed, not so much be-
cause the AIgerines ought to be Christian
lied, but because the sun was compelled
to pass through their town every morning
before it could get to the ancient city Of
J Bienville. This was not to be tolerated
longer.
Now, what was this sublime of all
sublimity?
The Mercer nary Electoral Juryj
They met, 'not in crowd" but in
secret, solemn session, the enlarged city
having stirred their ambition, like the
clubs of Paris during the Danton-Robes-
pierre days. The quick-esred heard, now
and then, vague whisperings of this SOL
emn conclave of patriots and statesmen.
They met, and wrapped in the solitude of
their own originality" set their Solonic
heads together. 1t was curious mixture
of pill-boxes, street railway nickels, hand
saws, musty ledgers, pocket bank-books,
chicken-cock whisky bottles, etc. indica-
tive of the occupation and peculiarities Of
each Scion. Superadded to these suggest
i've things" were emblems OF CONTRA
ternity, such as a piece Of the Star Span
gled Banner, sprig of shamrock, C
thistle, small quantity Of sour krout
and slice OF Limburger cheese, sample
of gumbo, an iDfnitesimal portion OF the
ark used in the days of that distinguished
cattle-dealer, good old father Abraham.
Fifty of these Solons resolved that
save themselves, not single person in
all this great metropolis, should say 3
word as to who sho,Id govern the people
under the new city charter.
These fifty wanted the name of no poor
man, no humble,mechanic, side by side
with their own. The city was rapidly
going to !the devil, and they alone were
the apostles of salvation. The rulers Of
the city were corrupt. inefficient, imbe-
Gle. They only were wise, efficient, hon
est
The fifty Mercer-nary jurymen sitting
in Judgment upon their own merits, and
the dement's Of everybody else, solemnly
acquitted, themselves of all blame in mu-
nicipal matters, and solemnly found every
body else guilty. A more delightful set
of Pharisees never met since the Lord
annointed, .scourged the money-lenders
from the Temple and consigned the Scribes
and Pharisees to the elimination Of hell"
The Governor, all at once, become a
great luminosity in the eyes Of these very
fifty" who had denounced him with all
the Vigor of indignant men. He was the
"star of the East, the horizon adjoining"
He must be appealed to by the now thor
oughly disinterested fifty. The fifty must
rule, and it was decided to follow the e2-
ample of Charley Howard, and get up
lottery.
The fifty got up their lottery. They
periodically put in a half dozen names
for Mayor and each of the seven commits
sionerships, taking care to "elect" some of
their own members for important posi-
tons. The annointed names were all
placed in the wheel of the lottery of the
electoral jury
The jury efulged. There being no
orators among them, speech was written
after the manner of the compositions OF
the bright little boys of the High School.
This speech was regarded as the very
spice of wisdom. There was no doubt
the Governor would wilt before the care
fully guarded language and the patent
truths of this model address. They had
put the names of the chosen in the lot
terry wheel, and this address was to tell the
Governor how to turn the wheel while the
"elec.orals" drew the prizes.
Alas, for the mutability Of all human
hopes, the Governor did not quail before
the august electoral jury. He did not
seem to appreciate with a particle of rap
ture the elegant diction Of the carefully
conceived address, nor did he evince any
taste for the turning of the crank of their
lottery wheel, and permitting the prizes to
be drawn by such disinterested patriots
and statesmen.
1t disposes one to laugh at the sublime
audacity of the few wealthy men OF every
community, whose ambition to rule is only
equaled by their incapacity to govern
anything but the yellow denizens of
money chest. Intrepid mediocrity always
insists upon venturing into places where
the very Titans of intellect fear almost to
tread. There is not Dives in all this
broad South who does not imagine that
his wooden head is as rich in braia fertility
as the men who create governments out OF
chaos.
Can the whole combined fifty electoral
jurymen make, in six or seven months,
bankrupt corporation rich and flourish
ing2 Is the condition of municipal affairs
not in great degree attributable to the
rich taxpayers, who buy up warrants |
wherewith to pay taxes, and stand on the
books indebted to the city a million of
greenbacks?
Why, "prithee Poinsw what would any
one Of the aforesaid jury do with our poor |