Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1870-01-13
N the Toledo Blnd
MASSEY.

Mr.. Nasty Settled at lasf-The City of
New York to be his Final Resting
PIacc-How he Is situated and how
he likes IL.
In THE 9Th WARD OF N. York,
December 10, 1869.
The dove wich Noah sent out come
back TO the Ark becoz the waters xiv cred
the land when the dove found dry spot
1t come back no more. | am dove. /
wuZ sent out from the Corners, but the
prevalence nv water druv me back, time
and agen. Now, thank Heaven, l hey
found spot where there is no water. (at
least I've never seen any used here for any
purpose(, and here l stay. My foot hcz
found Resin place.
am the sole proprietor NV the "harp
Nv Erin" S'loon. The original proprietor
Nv the " Harp Nv Erin" died the evenin
nv the last cleckshun, much regretted by
his pslitikle associates. He he'd only vo-
ted thirteen times, when IN an argument
techin the merits Nv his candidate, ez
compared with his opponent for the nom
insshen, he wuZ hit with brickbat, and
died with his days work half done. The
man who struck him wuZ expelled fro m
the society to witch he belonged for KILN
an able-bodied Democrat before the closiu
Nv the polls.
How l got possession Nv the s1oon
shell not slate. Suffice ii to say, IT became
mine, and the stock likewise, and that
shell never hev occashen to leave il. Here
| shell live, and here shell die. Wv course
I've decorated II to SCOT the tastes nv my
patrons. i took down the portrate NV
jackson. and cut off NV the bottom the
words, The Yoonyun, it must and shell
be preserved :" and substitouiid, "He
serves his party the best who votes the
most" which / read to those who drop in
eZ the last words NV the Hero NV Moo Or
leans. hey an Irish flag turned round an
Irish Harp over the bar, and portrates NV
the Head Centres NV the Fenian Brother
hood, properly wreaihed. all about the
room. On the end NV the bar, in the spot
where In other neyhborhoods The water
pitcher stands, hev box with {. hole in
the top Wv it. inscribed. "Coltribushens
for the benefit Nv our sufferIn brethren
in English Basteels may b. dropped in
here" That box more than pays my rent
Then / hev quite a cabinet Nv sakred rel
les. / bev a peece NV the rope witch hung
John Brown; lhe identical club witch kill
ed The first Niger in the riots NV Jooly '63:
a built fired at the Triboon Offs az that
time, with other soyeLeers dear 20 the
Democratic heart. witch attract many.
These hang onto the walls, and underneath
them. hev the prices NV drinks inscrib-
ed, with the stern, cold words, mo
TRUST"
| lnOggeratid my Establishment last
Wednesday mite. Rememberin tbs terri
BILE endin nv all my other inoggerashens.
declined OF fust To make any formal
openin, but my trends insiste that il wuz
the custom Nv the ward and that must do
IL. Nobody will buy yoor likker," sed
one, "ef 700 don't make regier openin.-
EFF make regler opcnin." sed /, Il
won't hev drop 10 sell EN-. Stay-I hev
it. I'll go before Justis NV the Peece
and take solemn oath not TO drink any
thing myself that nite."
"Twon't do" sed my friend. "Oaths
don't count in this ward"
Var.eus plans were rejected. Won gen
tleman proposed that | shcod he tied
down so that couldent git at the likker,
and that he shood do the honors. HIS
nose wuz agin HIM and / declined his
proposishen. Finally hit upon the plan.
calkilated that twenty gallons wood
anser. and put that amount in a barrel.
The balance NY the stock locked in a
room, and then put the key away ia a
drawer.
There" sed I triumphantly, safore
that twenty gallons is eggsaustid l shall be
too far gone TO kOnw where the key Of the
room holding the balance Nv the stock is.
Saved Saved :"
he'd speeches, and toasts. Mr.. O'Rafferty
al
try" He sed the term, "Our ADOPTED
country" wuz happy one, for so fai ez
Moo York waZ conserved the sons of Erin
he'd adoptid it. lie he'd bin charged with
lack nv love for this country. lie re-
PEELED the charge with scorn. Why
shoodn't he love this country? In wat
other country wuz votes worth dollar
apiece /? Where else Good SIGH 8. man ez
he hev SD high pesishen ez Alderman
and only two years on the ground. !.
Mr.. O'Toole jined in the sentiment.
Where else under the canopy Good man
like blsself who coodent read be skool
dIrecktor. He he'd often bin thankful
that he turned his face toward Ameriky
the mint his time wuz out in the prison
at Liverpool There wuz less risk in
holdin offs in Moo York, than in burglary
in England, and the result was sboorer.
Their wuzn't much more speech maxim
The drinkin went on fast and furious
tho, and ez antissipaed before the twen-
ty gallons wuz eggsausted, l wuz very
drunk and incapable Nv any effort, mental
or phYsikle. and the others were in very
much the same p-edicament. -Four or
five NV emu did try 10 rouse me, to git more,
but it wuz Nv no rse; they mite ez well
hev whispered Grey's elegy In The ear NV
dead mule. The most Nv EN- slept, ez
did, on the floor till the mornin.
shell be happy here. hev the steddy
patronage Nv two Aldermen, three skool
directors and four contractors, and when
the Mayor gifts the appintin Nv the poleece
there will be twelve policemen whose
trade kin count on There in my back
room Is where the preliminary caucusses
for the ward is held, and shell be paid
for wat the managers drink till git an
offs myself At last my lines lie cast in
pleasant places.
PETROLEUM Y. Massey,