Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1870-05-06
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
4 NAP-sAoK-A pillow-case.

A NAP-sAoK-A pillow-case.
A GALE-A-DAY is no treat for a mariner.
GROUND RENTS - The effect of an
earthquake.
THE Spring time of Life-Our dancing
days.
JUDY thinks doctors bills are a "tax
on patience"
WHAT can you not name without break
ing it? Silence.
WHY are bushes like girls Because
they become women.
If you want to marry real estate
agent, marry rich wife.
WHY is love like a canal boat? Be-
cause it is an internal transport.
THE most pleasant reflection some young
ladies have is the mirror.
IT is only those who have done nothing
who fancy they can do everything.
MANAGEMENT is better than stupidity
A policy in the Washington is better than
the promises of relatives.
A. F. WILMARTH, Vice President of the
Home, of New York, is a policy holder,
stakeholder and director of the Wash
ington Life,
AN English paper says: "a friend of
ours, whenever he dispatches telegram
now, invariably sends off letter by post,
to say it is coming"
A WATERBURY,, Conn, physician re.
Gently received q note from a mother,
which read as follows: "Doctor-Sir
Call and see the Baby and vexett him as
the small pox is Bout here as soon as
you get this"
A COLUMBUS photographer presented a
revolver at the head of a gentleman who
was sitting for his photograph, with the
| cheering remark: "My reputation as an
artist is at stake. If you don't look smil.
ing I'll blow your brains out" He smiled
ghastly smile.
THE NORMAL MUSICAL ACADEMY OF
the Northwest holds an Institute course
of two weeks in the Lecture Hall of Cros-
by's Opera House, Chicago, commencing
Aug. 23d, 1870, with the following power
full combination of teachers: FL. R. Palm
er, Carlo Bassini, Hans Balatka, Robert
Goldbeck, Dudley Buck, and E. E. Whit
temore. A very interesting programme
of each days exercises sent to any one ad
dressing FL. r. Palmer, Principal, Is Cros
by's Opera House, Chicago.
AS ALL young ladies desire to be con-
sidered beautiful, we publish the follow
ing recipe for accomplishing that desired
end:
How to be beautiful when oldf
| can tell you, maiden fair
Not by lotions, dyes and pigments;
Not by washes Tor your hair.
While you're young be pure and gentle,
| Keep your passions well controll'd,
Walk, work, and do your duty,
You'll be handsome when you're old.
Snow white locks are fair as golden,
Gray as lovely as the brown;
And The smile OF age more pleasant
Than youthful beauty's frown.
'Tis he soul that shapes the features,
Fires the eye, attunes the voice;
Sweet sixteen, be these your maxlms
When you're sixty you'll rejoice.
A STRONG HINT.-A little boy, who
had been told that he must never ask for
anything to eat away from home, went
into neighbours house when the lady
ohanced to be frying doughnuts. "Oh,"
said he, "you are cooking" Aware that
he had been well trained, and anxious to
see whether his appetite would get the
better of his manners, the lady did moi
give him any of the doughnuts "Well,
said he, returning to the charge, "youI
cakes look nice" "Oh, very nice" said
the lady "they are the best I ever cook.
ed" After playing with the cat few
minutes he remarked, "And they smell
nice.0 "Oh, yes, they smell very nice, y
was the lady Us stantalizing answer. "Well,
said the boy, II suppose if any little
child that was hungry should come in here
when you are cooking, you would give
him something to eat" "Well, yes,
think should" "Then," said he, aftel
another turn with the cat, AZ guess
must go home, for am very hungry" L
is needless to add that he got doughnut