davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11
HINTS FOR YOUNG LADIES

It's hardly the thing to be witty
fyou are decidedly young;
A girl may be charmingly pretty
And yet have the deuce Of a tongue.
Sharp answers are rather enraging,
When uttered with piquancy cool;
And girl may be sweetly engaging,
And make man look like a fool.
To women who hunt and are horsey,
(All feminine softness forgotl,
A well-behaved man may be saucy-
Hos surely spoon if he's not;
They fancy it very delightful
To strike out path Of their own,
But the world is uncommonly spitefuI,
And never will let them alone.
So, though Idon't wish to be rude, desrs,
To you-by the slangy called FAST"
Though often the first to be wooed, dears,
You'll find that you. married the last!
Your sentiments rather too gushing,
Your wit little too free,
And women who understand blushing
Men like for their wives, don't you see!
To try by your airs to outdo men
Is really a wonderful plan;
The loudest and fastest of women
Would make such a very slow mani
And 'twould be the same with US men, dears,
If We try this mimicry poor,
We should be as ridic ulOus then, dearS,
What girls we would make to be surel
Then do not consider it vexing
Your lives are such different things,
And never attempt at unseXing-
Sure queens are as royal as kings
You soon would find out what distress Is,
Without his strong arm and advice;
Without your quick wit and caresses
He wouldn't find life half so nice.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

E When Lingard was imperson-
ating different characters on the stage
of a New York theater, he came out
one night as "our Savior" and in or
der to show the meekness of the
Savior, he allowed the audience to
"revile" him and persecute him by
throwing peanuts at him, which he
stood bravely, until boy hit him on
the side of the head with rotten egg.
Lingard looked at his watch and said:
Gentlemen, this Savior business will
last about a minute, then you will see
me 90 for the id brute who threw
that egg"
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

TAKING Times LIrERALLY.-The
Emperor Paul, of Russia, once ordered
that certain retail shops should all be
numbered mo. l." etc.; forthwith ev-
cry shop bore on its front mo. 1, etc."
Such was the Emperor's order, and it
was literally Obeyed; for the Russians
are literal people. One day a man
date was issued that no man should
walk the streets at night without
lantern. A doctor set out on his
rounds, attended BY his servant carry
ing lantern. The police allowed the
servant to pass, but arrested the doc
tor,
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11
Number SO.
~A A nice little bov in p;,,sbnrc

re A nice little boy in Pittsburg
went to the circus the other day, and
amused himself throwing stones at the
elephant while drinking. When he got
through the boy tried to propitiate him
by offering him a piece of gingerbread.
Before accepting the cake the elephant
emptied about si1ty-four gallons of
water, beer measure, over the boy,
and then slung him into the third tier
to dry of. This boy is very indifferent
about circuses now. He says he
doesen't Care for them as much as he
used to.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

H Bonner is reported to have
spent nearly 100000 since he was
bitten by mania for 'fast ones" The
price paid for his most noted horses
are as follows: Pocahontas. $4,000,
Dexter, S33, 900; Bruno, S93. 900; Ma
jor Winfield, $4,000; Lantern and
Light, 100000; Flatbush Maid, s5,-
500; the Auburn Horse, $4,000; Joe
Elliot, colt now owned by him, and
expected to beat Dexter, cost 10000.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

FA Philadelphia youth named
Gilbert was duly arrested and ar
raigned before a magistrate, in Win
throp charged with assault with Gin
tent to kiss" the daughter of Daniel
c. Duley, Of Monmouth. The wretch
pleaded guilty, and paid his So fine like
a man.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

@ A Western paper thus records
the demise of favorite dog, killed by
lightning stroke:
"The bolt 1t flew and the purp he yowled,
As the lightning pierced his hide;
1t sapped his vital energies,
So he fiummixed, kicked, and died."
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11
His brother could not resist.

~ A man passed through Council
Bluffs, Iowa, day or two ago on bis
return to Missouri, after having tried
to live in Minnesota. "Don't like it
up thar" said he. "Have nine months
Of winter, and the rest Of the time it's
d-d late in the fall"
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

R A Scotchman who had put up
at an inn was asked in the morning
how he had slept. "Ah. mon." replied
Donald, mae vera well either, but 1
was muckle better off than the bugs,
for del one O. them closed an e'e the
hale NIGHT"
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

H- On last Tuesday night Mrs.
Jones, living in New Orleans, by ac-
cident dropped lighted coal oil lamp,
when the oil ignited. setting her cloth
ing into blaze and burning her body
so terribly that she died next day.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

% DR.. Hall says sponge beds are
healthy. We know man who has
sponged beds, and even sponged his
meals for FIVE years, and he isn't SO
very healthy-except at meal times.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

R A -taker in New HamP-
shire has telegraphed to Washington
for instructions, having found woman
who gives her age as thirty-one, and
her daughters age as twenty-seyen.
A lady Of our acquaintance says 1t is
all right, as such cases frequently hap
pen. 1t seems almost incredible, but
no gentleman will dispute a woman, il
she does lie little.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

@ A Cincinnati woman had eleven
children, but insisted that the census
marshal should call again the last of
the week, when she could make it an
even dozen. There is rivalry on the
part of that town and Chicago on the
subject of population. and the citizens
are all interested in doing their level
best.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

@ A young man who officiates in
a restaurant went to sleep in Syra-
cuse church, last Sunday, and sudden
ly astonished the congregation by
awaking and calling out, "Ham and
eggs for two!"
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

w 1t is said there is a likelihood
of the total extinction of elephants at
no distant day. They are yearly kill
ed in enormous numbers, mainly to fill
the demand for ivory. Though the
largest and most powerful of all exist
ing animals, they are easily hunted,
readily decoyed into ambush, and an
easy prey to the shot of an experienced
hunter. In the northern part of Cey
lon, a reward of few shillings per
head being offered by the authorities,
$500 were dispatched in less than
three years by the native hunters.
Sheffield alone requires annually the
slaughter Of large army of these
pachyderms, estimated at two thou
sand, to furnish ivory for manufactur-
ing purposes. The animals are by no
means SO prolific as to make amends
for this yearly slaughter, hence it
seems probable that before many ages
pass the race will be extinct.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

w Among the 10000 inhabitants
of San francisco, about 40, ,O0o,or near
" one-quarter, are Germans, There
are 26 German breweries, which an
nually produce 10000 barrels of Ger
man beer.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

~ "Dan," said a little four-year
old--"give me sixpence to buy a mon
key"
"We've got one monkey in ths
house now" replied the elder brother.
"Who is it, Dsn?" asked the little
fellow.
"You," was the reply.
"Then give me sixpence to buy the
monkey some nuts"
His brother could not resist.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

S Some ingenious biped has
machine to make a man rise early in.
the morning. A young Benedict says
a six-months old baby can beat it to
death.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

% A lazy man accounts for the
fact that he could not rise early in the
morning by saying that he could make
up his mind to rise early, but could
not make up his body.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

E A lady wished a seatina crowd
ed hall. A handsome gentleman gave
her chair. ''You are jewel" she
said. "Oh, no, I'm jewelsr; 1 have
Just set the Jewell"
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

R Foote, speaking of miserly ac-
quaintance, said he believed he would
be willing to take.the beam out of his
own eye if he knew he could sell the
timber.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

H The census-takers have yet to
find an unmarried lady over twenty
six years of age. What a year IA
must have been for girls.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

p% Some men are Ike the sun-tne
later they go to bed. the Garner 'ney
get up-to geta drink
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

R A hog at COvingtOn, Ky, got
drunk on brandy peaches, and made
man of himself by staggering around.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

E True goodness is like the glow
worm; it shines most when no eyes ex-
cept those of heaven are upon it.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

E A Wisconsin landlord requested
a boarder not to sleep with his boots
on. The incensed freeman shot him.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11
HOTEL.
American House.!

THIS HOUSE, situated on Locust Street,
L opposite the Court House. is always
open for the accommodation of day and week
bosrders, on terms as reasonable as any
house in the city.
CD. WALL.
Dec. Is, 1s67-tf.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

H Milkmen are happy q fellows.
They enjoy themselves at the watering
places all the year round.
Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1870-08-11

~A pair of tights-two drunkaESsl
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11
For the Jasper Weekly Courier
Two Famous i. q. q. rs.

lNO NhOuS H We Ne 30
They have fallen.
Those two illustrous ones.
Who Were sworn they'd keep the
pledge.
Till the last days sun was down.
They could not resist temptation,
Nor leave their vices behind.
Orcast aside the shining cup,
That flowed with the wine.
For the pleasures Of the world,
Are tempting TO the young.
And even in the blushing cup,
a song of warning is sung.
The evidence was this,
They'd been caught in the plight.
OF Staggering through Jasper streets
With females late III night.
The locomotive gave whistle.
The conductor cursed and sworc.
That he'd abstain from the templcrs,
And never join them amy more.
And now ! will cease.
For know that you arc weary,
But have only pictured,
Two Of lrcland's |. O. q. Terys.
IRELAND, March 10, 1870.
FELIX Fox.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11
Homemade Ink.

The ink is a beautiful black, flows free.
w. and does not in the least cOrrodc the
pen. 1t Is far superior to the usual acid
inks, which will spoil the best steel pen
in few hours use. In fact, we have no
ink that we like so well as this. 1t is
made thus: To five gallons Of water at
boiling heat, add one half pound log
wood. one half ounce Of bi-chromatc Of
potash, and one ounce OF prussiatc OF
potash. Your ink is then ready for use.
The cost is six cents per gallon.- Oak
land News.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

~ The recent decision ot the Su-
prcmc Court OF ihe United States. a. 10
The validity of Indiana divorces, will
settle that vexed question finally. The
effect of il is. tia; all The State Courts
must recognize them as valid, under
the Constitution Of the United States,
which requires iliat full faith and credit
shall be given TO the Judicial records of
every State by the Courts OF all the other
States. a moments reflections will show
that If this were not 80. there would be
no certainty in Judicial procecdings.and
the decisions of the Courts of one State
could not be enforced in the other States,
but would all be subject to review. This
would make all business intercourse be-
tween the states uncertain. If il did not.
in fact. put an end TO it. We have no.
thing. complimentary to say about the
manner in which divorces have been OBJ
lained in this State. but this decision
will end very troublesome and per-
plexing controversy. Terrc liaute Ex-
prpss.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

men who have known them from child
hood up-the men who have been their
friends in times past, may, by proper
course, restore that influence in them
selves which will enable them TO secure
the colorcd votes for the good of your
State and for the good of the county,
Let the consolidated sentiment of tho
men of Louisiana be brought TO bear up
on the Legislature and Tor the right.
Nou ask nothing that is wrong. You
ask that YOU shall be taxed only for the
public good. and that when the taxes are
collected the money shall be expended
FOR the public good. and that the corrupt
tide of special legislation shall oe stopped
We have much 10 accomplish. What is
Il we intend. That this Union shall be
perpetual, that ii shall rest OIL the Con-
slitution. and that all the rights. privil-
icres and prcrogatives OF the States shall
be maintained forever under that gov
ernment, and that the National Union
thus supported hy States clothed with all
their rights will be the temple in which
s'rcemen shall worship forever together.
Cheers.
What do we wish to accomplish
Nothing that is wrong = everything that
is right. We wish 10 establish in the
United States equal laws and just taxa
ton. These we must have. This plum
der of the State and national treasury is
becoming universal. There must be u
return 10 a spirit OF honesty in the public
service, both national and State. There
/ is power greater than that of law
\ Daniel Webster. in one OF his beautiful
iorations, when the question was agitat-
ing the heart of the world what treat
ment Russia would extend TO Kossuth,
land whether Russia would demand the
F return Of that patriot when he was un-
der the protection of Turkey, said there
. was power mighier than the earth
lGuakc-more terrible than the rumbling
OF the storm the Judgment of mankind.
II Cheers
i Let is. North and South. mite now
| for the purpose OF maintaining the insti-
/, Itutions OF our country in the spirit in
, which they were established by the great
: men who founded this Government.
,l | thank YOU for the attention you have
| given me; thank you Tor this " elcomc.
d III; is my first visit TO the southern coun-
try. ] thought that knew something,
: of your institutions. ! thought would
2 Icome 10 see il l was mistaken.
{ a.n satisfied. On observation. that
r was not mistaken. | am satisfied liza,
r tie course which felt il my duty TO lake
: in regard 10 lie question of reconsiruc-
: tion was right. / thought | was rIgni
@ at tie time. Now doubt it not. know
Q | wa. right. Cheers have seen YOU
= face 10 face. l have heard your gentle
n men .alk on this subject. / know how
r. yo,, ,eei. ine past IS the past 10 You
cIirhe future is coming with its weight
d clinterests and sponsibili;ics. Let III
n rise 10 meet the future. Let Us welcom,
4 lit: and let Us be sure tic ''liberty for q!
n and oppression for none" is the watch
70 word OF tAat future. Loud cheers.I
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

r-A MARRIED man in New Albany
has adopted an original method Of econ
omy. One morning, recently when he
knew his wife would sec him, he kissed
the servant girl. The house expenses
were instantly reduced $500 per year.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

-" "New then. stupid, what's the next
word! What comes after chccse:' DUH
boy: "A MOUSE, SIR
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

RATES OF ADVERTISING.
For square of 10 lines or less, week. 8 co
zach subsequent insertion, 75 cts.
Longer advertisements at the same rate
A fraction over even square or squares.
counted Us II square. TheSearc the terms
for transient advertisements "a reasonable
deduction will he made TO regular advor-
tisers.
Notices Of appointment Of admini~tra-
tors and legal notices Of like characterize
be paid in advance.
ANNOUNCING CANDIDATES.
For Township officers, each Sloo
For County . -.oo
~. n;str;ct Circ,,it. or State. 800
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

GA liquor license costs two hum
drcd dollars in Kokomo. Indiana.
az ENGLAND is soon IL 'adopt half
penny newspaper postage.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11
PUBLISHED EVERY FRIDAY, AT JASPER
DUBOIS COUNTY, INDIANA, BY
CLEMENT DOANE.

OFFICE.-IN COURIER BUILDING on
WEST MAIN STREET.
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11
= a SPE R a. = III - n = Il
MAIL EXPRESS e. STAGE ROUTE
A. STEINHAUSER

w g. Contractor for the Shoals and Jasper Mail rs
press Route. respectfully informs the public ma,
...hs ariv., and prepared convey passengers ana
sxrrsss matter between the Ohio and Mississippi Rail
road At shoals aud Jasper. or way places on 'nc route
will nni this the cheapest well most pie isant rout
Al All times az they several miles travel Persons
sennV or receiving exprcssege ~ any khu may nepcn
On having Il carefully handled and promptly ana safety
S.,ivered W sage leaves Jasper eveyFriday mornin
Al railroad asns .hsr ~sy returning leaves shoals
~ seiosA. \. sihHhNoohA'
OstsLsr ssh--isSs-N
The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1870-03-11

PRICE OF SUBSCRIPTIONS.
Single Subscription for fifty Nos, s so
For six months, L CO
The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1870-09-01
.;nCrrn4{9pI,rra.

The disease called SpirmatorAG.a. or So
m"rial Weakness, il also known ~ Sexual
lucapaci-y. sentinel Emissions, Hhysiaa!
Decay. Nervous Debility. etc.
We are PERFECTLY aware THAT ai!li"ti"nS
o. he 'sc&ual Gag aEi-m are u-uaIly avoid
cd by many scicntiilc members OF he pro-
fcs'iun; IN cen sequence OF The odium at
tachod. consr qtWn,iy the unhappy victim,
Of this dis"ns,. gradually sink into the
grave, unless they can hnu some i'nysi~
cian who may mIho il a Speciality.
Young U.cn are tHrWOft frequent a'lii"r-
crs from this disease, although many
adults are most tcplogabiy afflicted WITH
it,
1t is destroying the t.ircst Of America,
wrccErn@ raind. soul and body. Tnc oy-
tent to which this disease prevails in
Schools and families is absolutely iri%htiiI
appalling and beyond bc,icf.
Diu not professional confidence seal oar
lips, We OUld present pirtdrCs OF suffering.
lie. ruin. and eternal misery unparalleled
IN anyrOmance.
Accused be that false telicacy which
makes parents and guardians blind and
deaftp this vice.
so little is therefore known by the
prolr.sio.. ,-Dnrraily, ihatyOung men who
have been under treatment have aItIo t
dc-p.ircd OF getting relief. and are pa sing
Rapidly .u.c Constn 1.-., $50 all diseases
OF % Pr!yat, nature.
Mercury j.. ihc shcet-anchor Of the Pro-
l2- ION generally. 1t has never cured any
| ease, and never VIII.
" warrant to cure one hundred cases
to every one cured by any other Physician
IN t,:G county.
Call on OF address
DIR. J.. l.. COLEMAN,
oct2S Nashville. Tenn.
The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1870-09-01
Personal.

HAMBRIGHr.--Mr. Hugh Hambrigh1
is in town, and looks as graceful a:
ever.
SNEED.--NIrs. Quixana Snced has re-
turned from her visit to the mountain
and appears to be much improved.
ScorT.-Mr. James l.. Scott, of the
firm Of Adams d Co., Nashville, was
in town last Sunday, looking as pretty
as pink.
GARNER.-Mrs. Garner, of Colum.,
bus, Miss, left here several weeks ago
on trip to the mountain, and has not
yet returned.
WmTAKEE.-Miss Alice WHITAKER
who has been spending q short time
with Miss Kate Marks in this place
returned to Edgclield last week.
BEowN.-Pror. w. A. Brown, who
takes charge Of the Mathematical De-
partment in the Mary Sharp College,
has arrived here, ald resides for the
present at Mr.. Matthews.
The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1870-09-01
Sewanee Collegiate Institute,
winchester, Tennessee.

Tho Fall Term will open Oh the 10Th of
August, 1870, the usual ten months ses-
sion.
The new Principal having no other en-
gagcmcnts to occupy him. will give his
undivided attention 10 the school. As
.oud academic instruction rs can he found
anywhere will be given. 1t i the Object
10 bulk! up a fine preparatory school. 50
that hoy leal ing here for College will he
able 10 enter tho Sophomore class ut least
This is something very much needed in
this comm nifty. and Il liberal patronage
gwen for one year. or at the lurihe,t twO
years. ilourishins school. doing honor to
the community. will he established.
The Principal can command the very
best assistance. II the school grows to such
4 II: "a TO require il.
81 Terms. 81 to SO per month. payable
quarterly. POSITIVELY IN ADvASCg.
ID. u. RAMSEY.
july 23-2m Principal.
The home journal. (Winchester, Tenn.) 1858-188?, 1870-09-01
(coMMUNlCATIoN.l
j. II. BeasleN Esq.,,

u. ~. OedStey, LS4.,
DEAR SIR:-The citizens Of the 81
and 4th civil districts of Franklin couD
ty are going to hold primary meeting
at Salem on Saturday, September 3D.
for the purpose of appointing delegate
to the proposed County Convention to
be held at Winchester September 9th.
Our best citizens appear to be in IA
vor Of nominating candidate for the
Legislature and State Senate at tn,
Winch ester meeting, as well rs to APP
point delegates to the congressona,
and eubernatorial conventions. Ar
engagements are being made with The
W. IL A. r. r., (and l presume the n.
e. C. r. r. will do as well to pass those
who wish to attend the meeting at hall
price.
1t is earnestly hoped and desired that
the Democratic Party throughout our
county will send representative men to
the Winchester meeting TO attend to
the proposed business.
The people were outraged sufficient
ly during Radical rule in this county TO
cause them TO arise now as one mar and
put the influence of this corrupt party
forever at rest in this county.
II the Democratic Party is true to
itself in Tennessee, the Radical Party
will soon be so very odious tia. well
bred ours will refuse to bark at them.
Let the conservative party be active,
consistent and vigilant. United We
stand but divided we fall. Their is Il
tide in the affairs Of men, which, if Ia
ken at the food, leads on to fortune.
On such a full sea is the Democratic
Party now aAoat, The people We hope
are prepared 70 take the current as i'll
serves. Come to the meeting at y in
chester, Monday, September 9th
Yours truly, o. K.