The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1870-01-27
TIL i u I l. OF
HUMOROUS.


up, and paying down!
'.What is the cause Of that bells ring
ing z inquired William. Il think SAID
John, that somebody is pulling the
rope.
Dogs ought to he valuable to tanners, OF
account OF the immense quantity OF bark
they yield.
you grow up, Tommy" No. ~ hy
not n Because women can turn sour
er.au.ts. . s.#
An Alabama editor, in putting grocery
kept by a woman, say: Her tomato es are
as red as her own cheeks. her indigo a.
blue a. her own eyes, and her pepper rs
hot as her ON temper.
An Eastern journal says Edwin Forrest
is playing to poor houses IN Western
cities" The poor houses in Eastern cities
are not able to indulge Ia such Injuries
Why are ladies. like watches? Because
they have beautiful faces, delicate hands,
are more admired when iull jeweled. aud
need re gulating very often.
Illegal husbaudry ,hrashing wife.
A pretty girl, like hard sum, is some>
thing to cipher tslgh forl
A lady noticed a h,tle boy sprink ling
sat on the sidewalk, 20 take OF the ice, aud
remarked TO a friend pointing at the salt,
Now that is true benevolence. No, IL
amt, SAID the boy; Its salt.
That was a brutal husband, who, As he
saw his wife recedlng from him on the icy
sidewalk greatly to The peril OF bone, SAID
Let Der slide - but when she landed IN
the courteous rms of good ooAing young
man, he dldn', think 1t quite SO funny.
jim has pTecocious nephew, lad just,
three years Old. Playing with lis little
kitten yesterday, Miss Kitten got her back
up about something kittens as well as
folks often ger their backs upl aud seam
pered across the floor. LluIe nerhe~ was
delighted and sang out, Look, ma, kit
tens got e Greclan bend.
Why are kisses like creation? Because
they are made out Of nothing, aid prove 10
be very good.
Some of the styong~minaed women De
nounce matrim0ny becausn, they say, there
is something childish IN II.
A lapdog biting a piece out Of a male
visitor leg, his mistress thus expressed
her compassion: Poor little creature! |
hope il won make him sick.
A London thief returned q purloiDed
UNI arelfs with this note: This uu.breilar
has prado hon ny konshens ever sin | stole
him. Vi. Il.
A learned doctor, referring to tight lac
ing, ayers that Ii l. u positive benefit, inas>
much "a, II huts all The foolish gUls and
leavea all the wise ones 10 grow W TO be
women.
Li,tlr Johnny was bcing casachi,ed 10y
hi> buy'Lcr VITO a,AcI hItn what he Wa
nSdrd. Jahuay lop..cd: \ "a ana me
am! papa ave made oul of dust, and mamma
ind sister are made oi mems wib,
Brick Pom roy ha~ rather demoGa,ized
opinion Il NO ieFu maidtu-, toT he says: The
good, square, honest country lasses We
knew iH years agone seem hike choice
dreams compared to the walking shu8-
windows, hair pcdIhng. ribbon ssuging,
teter-tlpp hg, gewgaws OF humanity now
called glris.
y husband advertises tins: MY wife
Maria has stlayed or been stolen. u ho
over returns hel wlll get his head broken
As 10 trusting her, anybody can do 80 II
they see III; for as | never nay NY own
debts, il not likely / Il pay her n.
In the Wyoming House of Representa-
,iye-. recently, distinguished member,
seeking 10 sustain poInt 81 order, partial
~ removed his outer garment, aud re
marked: Mr.. Speaker, If some reliable
man will hold ny coat, I'll teach the hon
orable gentleman that he as out OF order. >
The point Of ORDER vas sustained.
Dear mel exclaimed Singing, chat
new surgeon gave Squautom boy new
lip from the child owr cheek. I've
had pair OF lips taken from NY cheek
more than once, replied Mrs. Singing
and II WASH a painful operation at ali.
An Inshman the other day Numbered
out noble answer IL a le>tlterous dun.
I've may call. scr, Tor the dirty bill this
day month, and if | see your ugly face be
fore that day, he gorrum Il have to take
the receipt from your executors.
boy, may inquire where Robinson
drug store L.! Certainly, SIR, repaed
the boy, very respect ully. We'll, IF,
said the gentleman, after waiting awhile,
where is i?'' Il haze not the slightest
idea, your honor, said the urchin,
A Pittsburg young man asked girl,
whom he had been following, and an en-
tire stranger 20 him, to see her home. She
acceste'i, aud on arriving ut her home, she
sc, her DOG on him. He left his ,at, coat
tail, and a piece OF refund steak ln.Ide thu
yard. lie now sits down with difficulty,
and has pillow under the spot.
Pat Doolau at the battle CT Chancellor
vile. bowed low at cannon tall which
whzzed just six inches above his head,
"Fai,h," SAID Pat, "oue never loses any
thing by being polite.s
Buffalo eirls are very saucy. May
see you homer inquired a lad Of lass at
church last Sunday. You may see ue
anywhere you hike; bat yuu eau t walk
with me, vas the est response.
At Lansing, Iowa, 80 young mer have
formed themselves into club, and vowed
q solemn vow that no member shalt marry
Any one but a widow. The husbands OF the
place are also cu'tvating clubs nrosty
hickory-and swearing there vii be a nal
s,rude ri bach eIor fttOara,S tnrf heith