The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1870-03-17
'IH /. i IL O I.
HUMOROUS.

tCat AT sea Was tod ~ her that DeLla
min de7r-s loved his Bible AMI it he was
called 10 leave, he was prepared 10 %, tor
lie wa. good mau Here long silence
eususi FInal'r, drying her ear, The wife
t..G In low ahI earnest tone. w eil,h be
q "a 90, II must have been that same gust
that -rv ed he barn. Inc missing man
kuosequ, MY returned
German version ot an old couplet: VI n
waa!s but little beer be:Ow, but wants that
little strong.
A Cincinnati paper says: There should
be All IL pector OF back haIT ~ 'hIs city
I'ts hard 10 ts.l which Is -witcn.
What should clergymen preach shout?
Abo1t fifteen minutes.
Josh Billings says "One Of the fussiest
scenes | ever seed WIZ tSo old iAalds
waitin on one rick wdower.
Suffering from vet groceries is the
polite name for drunk III Chicago.
A Western schoo-,cacher received the
following note from one Of her scholars as
sp excuse for taidincs-: Baby cross Bl>cuit
up set the coffee pot the cat licked IN the
An old farmer lays that when the
weather is mid during cold weather, 1t /.
apt 10 De cold and dIssgrteafie when the
weather gets warmer and If We don I have
enough cold weather N February. We get
i, De the weather becomes hot. He is Of
the opinion that farmers miss it In not
having ii cooler tran they do at this season
Of The year, and seems to attribute the FREE
aucnt failures IN the ir'Iit crop to their
cAIeleosness i'll bringing on spring weather
100 soon.
Since the story has been told of how
Judge Brock ILIIdgc marie a girl whom
hi saw jump over rali-tence with pall
on her head, all the girls In Orange county,
New York, are SAID to spend then time III
watching the read. and whenever they see
. carriage approaching with man IL II,
they scize their pals and 20 tor fence.
Why ia the earth ike blackboard? Be,
cause the children OF nen multiply upon
the face OF Il.
How long does widow mourn for her
husband? he moutn, Tor a second.
A chaplain of state prison was asked
b. friend how hI- pari-hioncrs were. 'Ail
under conviction, was the reply.
WHY i, dog with broken leg Ikea boy
at arithmetic Because he puts down three
aud carries one.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot?
Not If they have money.
Why are umbrellas like good Catholics .?
They keep lent SO vel
Are members of City Council called City
Fathers from their extensive dealing, IN
"lap!'
Mr. Billings is of the opinion that "there
IL lots ov pe0ple in this world who c0yct
mistortunes, just for the luxury Of grunt
ing.
London has discovered Nordaunt that
fixes the dye Of fast colors on the Priuts of
Wales.
An old farmer whose son had lately iitd.
WAS visited by neighbor, who began to
condole with him on hi, loss My loss !
exclaimed the father, no such thing; It
was bis own loss-hr was Of age.
a sentimental youth SAYS he prefers
hanging on the neck 10 hanging BY the
neck; but that both are dangerous
a great beer drinker SAT out a duh drama
because he wants to see the tint )ae of th.
play.
An 1rishman that was very near sighted
about to fight "A duel, insisted that he
should stand six PAGES nearer his antagon-
list than the other did to him.
A commentator discovers that Nehu-
oAadnezzar invented the popular game of
old sledge, because he got his living on
'all fours, for seven years.
A young lady in Chicago made bet of
kiss, the other day, but the yet was De-
ciarsd null because she didn't put up the
stakes.
4 Methodist minister In Vermont has
forbidden any one to play base viol in his
church. He says however serious his
thoughts may be, the moment he hears
fiddle he goes to thinking how he used to
dance.
a grocery man in Charleston made be-
lleve suicide In his store, and when the
poopis rushed IN, lie mounted tie counter
and began telling how cheap he sod green
tea.
la a game of cards great deal depends
on good playing and good playing on
good deal
There is an old lady in Lynchburg, Va,
who says she made pair of socks last
fifteen years by merely knitting feet to
them every winter, and legs every other
winter
A gentleman was Gliding his son for
staying out late at night or rather early
next morning, and SAID: ''Why, when |
was Of your. age my father would not allow
me to go out of the house after dark -
Then you had deuce of father. you
had, sneercd the young prohgate; where
upon the father very ra>hly vociterated.
Il had confounded sight better one than
you have you young rascal.
Speaking of recent gale in the vicinity
of White fine, Nevada. one miner remark
ed wv by Its a reg lar typhoid" where
upon q comrade patrouiziugly remarked to
the bystanders, He's an ignorant cuss
he means tycoon.
School marin to little Jessie; wv here is
the North Pole, Josie p Top Of the map,
marin.
4 man cant help what j. done behind
his back, As the scamp said when he was