The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1870-12-22
A street Car sketch.

How the dickens is 1t that the people
can't let the girl of the period alone She
can hardly open her eyes, or turn around
but somebody undertakes to analyzs her
and pick her all 10 pieces. Here is how
some impertinent newspaper person has
photographed this estimable young lady
as she appears in that model of misery
and discomfort, the street car:
She stands upon the curb, with little
spriEgy, up-and.down motion, as if she had
spiral springs IN the soles of her CATERS. As
the car approaches she sticks the point of
her parasOl IN the direction of the driver.
with small jerk. The car stops. She
gives one or two more little springy motions
before she leaves the pavement, and then
dances to the car. As she ascends the step,
the conductor seems to consider it absolute
ly necessary to her safety to place one of
his hands in the small of her back while he
rings the bell with the other. She enters
the car, with the spiral springs still bobbing
her up and down. and, as the seats are full, ,
she stands holding her hands in front of her,
and gazing off into illimitable space, as if
the Que idea which never entered her mind
and never could enter it under any pOssib
circumstances. is that some man will rise
and offer her his seat But young man in
the corner does rise. and Immediately the
fellow next to him moves quickly into the
corner, as if the performance of that mauueu
yer had formed the subject of anxious
thought during many years Of his life 70
get Il corner seat indeed would seem to be
the chief end of map, if we remark the ayidi-
" with which human beings in street cars
seek that object. When the young man
rlsgs, the young lady suddenly becomes con
scious that there is something nearer to her
than the horizon, and she gives two or more
little bounces, aud says: ''Keep your seat !"
The young man Is em OarrasSed and saws he
is going to get out soon whereupon the fair
being dances toward the seat, sinks Into it,
and pretends that the fact Of the existence
of any young man who once occupied that
seat, aud who is going TO get out. has entire
ly faded out of her consciousness She
smooths down her dress and its supplement
tai trippery, penants and hOunces, and again
looks far beyond the confines of the car int
emptiness. She knows she is expected by
the other women in the car to remain uncon-
scious of their presence while they study her
clothes. They Immediately begin. They
stare at her dress. at her hat, her sacGue. her
bows and ribbons, her jewelry. her gloves.
her back hair. aud her miscellaneous mills
merry, until the entire costume is photograph
ed IN their memories. the price estimated,
and critical opinion formed, with resolu-
ton to have bonnet Of the same kind. or a
body" cut out upon the same pattern
When the young lady thinks this examina-
tion ID concluded, she becomes conscious
again. and begins to look around and see
how all the other women are dressed She
examines each one in detail and in a few
moments sue is in possession of all the usual
facts. Presently young mau with whom
she is acquainted gets into the car, and he
stands ciutching the strap, and trying in
vain to keep himself in a graceful attitude
wEile he cunverses with her. All the women
begin to wonder if she cares particularly for
him-and. as she knows their thoughts, she
is so distant that the young man becomes
more embarrassed than ever, and makes re-
newed struggles to maintain graceful poSi>
ton. When she wishes to get out she rises,
smooths down her frippery again. INDUCES
in two or three springs, and dances along
the platform. The conductor then considers
it imperatlvely necessary to once more press
the small of her back. She dances down
the steps, dances to the pavement. aud then
dances along the street, fully aware of the
fact that the women IN the car have all
turned round to look at her and serenely
confident in the assurance that she has on
good clothes, which fit her splendidly As
she disappears. the conductor turns to the
man who is smoking cigar on the platform,
| and remarks that she is a ''crusher ~