Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1870-09-01
AS AN ADVERTISING MEnr1ru
of feeling will so increase that in a short
time you will become one of the most
miserable of human beings.
AZSCEL LANEO US ITEMS

AISCEL LANEo US ITEMS.
Great Britain takes her census next
year.
They have Chinese lawyer in San
Francisco. tat ~ ,Ilt--71,J
Sweden has a population of little over
4,000, 900 il-.., - - =
P. I. Barnum talks of starting irnu-
scum in California. Sl,ila-i
South California aspires to to become a
separate State. sesiz rs 3la.
Bonner admits that il dosen't pay to
Keep fast horses about him.
England has abolished cutting man
In four pieces for treason. Hi- ia .l-isf
There are 20 known dwarfs in the
world smaller than Tom Thumb. Jqs-f
A New Yorker has invented nicro-
scope which magnifies 5000, 900, 900
times. ,'o-.'-.-
Paris ate up over 2, 700 horses last year,
and the Emperor killed three hundred
more as worthless. i.-,.t ...,......ts.
What is the difference between temp-
tation and eternity? The one is vile of
devil, and the other devil of a while.
Plain hanging is played out with re-
porters. They tell of mans Esprit
being choked out of his mortal casket at
the end of hangman's cord" sisii.ics
In Chicago, Mary A. Hugg asks for di-
vorce from Oliver Hugg. This is the
first instance on record of a wo man go
ing back on hug, especially on an all
over Hugg.
California is "going it strong" OF the
chicken business. One hatcher has n
oven in which he matches 200 dozen eggs
at sitting" .s a.aiZ .il. oyssI-
Scott county, KY, boasts ofa henthat
is nursing pup, which she shelters and
scratches for, to the neglect of her own
offspring. nv ~ ..iD--idJ sffo...s--
Hon. Samuel Shellabarger was notni-
mated for Congsess, yesterday, by the
Republicans of the Seventh District
An Irish editor speaking of the nniser-
les of Ireland, says: "Her cup of misery
has been for ages overfowin, and is not
yet full. .'...-.-..--,'
A young lady in town, who was boast
ing of her teeth, was asked if they were
the reply, "they are gutta percha.n
Babies are the coupon attached to the
bonds of matrimony. The interest is
due at random.
Why is q man who has no children
invisible?-Because he's not parent.
A man in this vicinity broke his Jaw
trying to read European war dispatch
in which the names of several generals
appeared.
The editor Of Tennessee paper an
nounces himself personally, Z morally,
pecuniarily and physically responsible
for its contents. ..'..t.
What is the difference between the en-
trance of barn, and loafer in print
ing officer? One is a barn door, and the
other darn bore.
An Illinois farmer cut his throat be-
cause of the drought. They buried him
in rain that lasted twenty-four hours.
Mules were created with the same d.
vine motive that bachelors were-to eat
work, bray, kick and die, and leave no
trace behind.
An exchange says that it is a great
great satisfaction to know that the ice
crop is fine in Alaska-only a quarter of
a mile thick. ..T
An old lady was once run awaywith
down hill, spilled out and nearly killed.
Her minister called on her to condole
with her, and said he supposed she put
her trust in Providence during the
ordeal. She said she trusted in provi-
dence until the breeching broke, when
she gave up. -
NEEDLE GUNs.-A prominent Demo-
crat in our county is explaining the
needle gun to his neighbors; He says
they fire needles, and no particular
harm is done until the flesh of the
wounded festersI These testers get fly
blown and then comes thunder! We
should think so,-Logan Republican.
"Can an man see without eyes2n ask
ed professor. -.
"Yes, sir" WIS the prompt answer
Pray, sir, how do you make that out?'
cried the astonished professor. ~
He can see with one. sir, replied the
ready.witted youths ;and the whole school
shouted Mith delight at his triumph over
metaphysics. 2b" -l-- 'a--liJ -s'21-
The fact that stuffed raven Of Mr..
Dieken brought a hundred and twenty
induces the Saturday Review to
suggest the propriety of some relic wor-
shippers trying to discover the bird that
Shak speare was thinking about when
be talked of the "hoarse ravenn who
croaked the fatal entrance of Duncan to
the.castle of Macbeth. sga,,5 v!.r,,
A colonel of q regiment which served
during the rebellion for short time met
one of his men in the street few days
since, and, after talking over camp life,
,he former private said: "I tell you
what it is, Colonel, the boys used to
,rumble about you, but they were un-
grateful fellows; they ought to be thank
ul to you, for you always kept them out
If danger, Colonel" .....
When a horse refuses to eat, he should
let be made to do any more service that
lay, for it may be known that he is tired
ut or sick. 1t is barbarous to compel
lorse to perform labor when in such 8
ondition that he refuses grain, yet it is
ften done, and by men, too, who think
hey are merciful.
"Quite correct, my dear; the natives
f South Africa do not require clothes to
eep them warm, because they are Hot
entots, don't you see? Coolies are
sort of people altogether. So
re the people of Chilli" tgst;
Mrs Sarah Anderson Is the name of
he last young woman who was scraped .
p and gathered to her fathers and moth
rs in small pieces, merely because she