Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1870-03-05
nadu Nausbse Saurnal.


hs termed intimate etiquette. This Is
tcrched by such inquiries a. we see in the
correspondents column Of ladies papers.
where Lucia wants TO know if she ought
20 allow gentleman TO kiss her when she
comes home with him from 3 concert, and
Carolina is dubious as 10 whether she
should correspond with her friends be-
grothed in secret. One can't but sympa-
thine with the Young ladies, knowing how
ineonsiaerately some one has neglected
daty toward them. Mothers and guardians
seem often TO fancy that knowledge now
10 conduct oneself in the delicate diiemmas
Of life comes by instinct. Girls leave
scc,h.1=so. and 20 into society with the vaguest
of notions abou, their relations to 1t, and
stumble through its small difficulties, hid
ing their endorsements as best they can,
keeping brave front to the last while the
world never guesseS the secret fortunes
thew undergo in trifling matters. Often
enough. for mere restless craving for novel
condolences, young ladies seek public in
stead of priva.e advice, when their mothers
and friends are ready and competent to
give them all the help they need. But
there is great deal of trial that besets
young girls at the age when they feel
allurements most keenly. which the best
parents forget to provide against. They
ought to recall their own debates of eti-
quette in youth, and teach their children
prudence before they need it. Fore
warned. forearmed.
Nellie, see here, says prudent father
to his girl of Is, in her tarletan ball dress,
warming her slippers before the fire,
waiting her escort-if girls ever do any of
the waiting, you're looking sweetly fresh
to night, and as fresh in heart.sas in dress,
hope. You are to stay SO. do you hear,
maddhen. You are not to let people hold
you close when you waltz nobody has any
business to touch you till you have lover
or husband of your own. l don't want
my girl talked about. Remember, nobody
has the least right on any pretense to do
more than touch your fingers, or lay his
hand on you in the permitted freedom OF
the waltz, unless he is your relative, or
going to be-
And after that she would probably sit in
the conservatory, letting handsome Jack,
the fast fiat and lady killer, slip his arm
by degrees from the back Of her chair.
lift her locket from her bare neck, and kiss
her hand till he dared to kiss her lips, and
gather her close to him, which would
probably be the sixth time they met at the
farthest You see men and women like
such things.
It's right they should. I'm not going to
belle the blood that beats in this wrist one
instant. to say they should not. Only one
may have some choice as to whether one
will accept caresses from the wholesale
stock of natural liking, or the special re-
served fund of precious performance.
Suppose young warm-hearted girl, that as
you lean on that broad shoulder in the
half-lit parlor tonight, thinking how nice
it is to have somebody fond and protecting
and how dear you seem to be to him, sup
pose you should by some invisible mag
netic sense, be made aware of all tie
cheeks that had rested on that shoulder,
and all the forms that arm had encircled. |
It's fortunate you don't know these things |
1t might lead you, however, to keey your
self more sacred for some one who will
love you as entirely as you love this man,
who takes life as it comes" and by force
of habit, if not by inclination, could not
one woman six months If his
happiness depended on it.
Did you ever see the old fashioned book
on etiquette called the Young Lady's
Friend?" Good Mrs. Farrar will never
guess the benefit that straightforward,
wholesome book of advice has been to
girls. She knew the class she was writ
ing for, and gave her opinion in such
frank words as those quote from memory:
You are to allow no personal freedoms
from gentlemen Of your acquaintance.
If finger is put out to examine locket |
OF chain on your dress, draw back and
take it off for inspection. The reason for
this rule is clear to those who are better
acquainted with the world"
The reason is perfectly clear to every !
one who comes TO twenty-five years of age
outside of reform institution. A man of
society, who dealt in occasional rough
ness of speech, said once in a parlor be-
New York girl of fashion, for the class !
allowed themselves to be handled too !
much. A girl who protects herself from
the freedom too much in vogue in society, |
increases her own value, if She only knew
l don't believed in prudishness or suspicion, /
but ! do believe that when men and wo- |
man are not contented with the friendship !
that can be expressed by frank. kind eyes,
and cordial, briet hand-shakes, and clear |
words one is not ashamed that the world !
should hear, they should know what in
toxication they are sharing. There is a
fine, distinct line between the cordial COM
merce of good will and Heaven-warm at
lection, that binds the human family to-
gether, and these leadings of attraction
that with nameless license destroy the
bloom of refinement.
There is one rule that settles thousand
queries of the nature we are considering.
Whatever is secret may be safely un-
The touch, the look, the init
macy, the correspondence that needs to
be secret, has something wrong about it.
If you are sure there is no evil in your
for Heavens sake come out and
avow your friendship, your design, what
ever it may be. You make the world
purer and set a precedent by your frank
ness that tears away thousand hypocri-
cies. The world has keen scent for the |
really innocent. and il you cannot face its
first sneers of criticism, you have reason
to doubt yourself.--Fr0m "SAirley Dare"