Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-08-25
TERENCE MIGRANT.

TERENCE MIGRANT.
Returns TO Long BrancIi-Ab0uI the
ST. Louis Arrest-AItending Church
in Chicago.
Correspondence Of the New York Democrat.
Lone BRANCH, Augusht siventeen.-
Mlsther Pummery: Thanks till kind Prov
idence and the railroad companies that
give me cousin passes to travel widout
paying divil the clint, we are wonce more
under our own vine and fig-tree, though
divil the vine is there here, but ovid
Dents cucumber vines, and as for fig
trees, the naresht we come to it is lone
pine in in the front yard, that pines for
company. But l can tell yez, as blake
and unsociable as the country looks here,
it is far preferable to st. Louis, wild its
thrials aud thribulations, and Chassepot
fishky, and lager beer that takes up 80
much room.
Och, murdheri 1t is the wondher of
wonders that we are alive and able to
ate hearty at all at all. The likes of the
narrow escapes we had to undergo there
niver had parallel in the war, am sure
Begorra, whin think of it, me hand in
shtinctively grasps me pocketbook, or
me cousins rather, as though pickpockets
or Republican convention was forninst
me. The paple in the Wesht are money
maniacs, indade. They same to think
because me Cousin Ulisses is getting a
fair salary, wild other perquisites in the
way of presents, that all they have to do
is TO tap him and put a spigot in, and
how'd a basket under, and he will run
clare granebacks. But he won't Devil
the wOnce. Ye can get any other bever-
age bether than granebAcks from him, as
l know be experience.
But how'd on till l tell yez. Be aisy,
now.
Ge mind me cousin has bit of farm
fOrninsht st. Louis, where he raises whate,
fat oxen, corn in the ear, cord wood, and
other vegetables for market. In this way
he thries to earn an hOnesht living, aside
from the won he earns at Washington, be
the shweat of his eyebrow, through a
Finchmsn be the name of O'Flaherty,
who does the manual labor, and the wo-
manual labor, too, for that matter, for his
wife died from the kick of a COW, God
resht her sowl-the woman's sowl not
the cows We mind. Well, as l ives going
to tell yez, this Friedman be the name
of O'Flaherty tuck in some shtock to pas
ture, giving me cousin half the procades
One of me cousins horses was afther do
ing bit of kicking, as all firsht family
horses will, and in the ruction kicked off
some of the legs of horse belonging to
common, ordinary citizen, as me cousins
horse had perfect right to do. Now,
that do yez thinki This man aXed me
cousin would he be afther paying three
thousand dollars damages. Me cousin
Ulisses was angry.
'Fhst! !" says he till the man, whose
name was Stark. eye mustn't be stark
mad to think l would pay the price of
tirsht-class C0nsulship for a few broken
horses legs. In the language of me friend
Hinry Ward Bacher, Not be a damd
sight, D" says me Cousin Ulisses, as he lit
fresh bethel of fishky and pulled the
cork out of a cigar
"Thir,n says the man, as cool as an
iceberg, Notwithstanding the great honor
conferred upon me by being the recipient
of such attentions from horse belonging
to the President of this great nation, the
law must take its course, and shall cause
your arresht for breach of the peace.
Officer, do your duty"
At this point Shiriff put his hand on
me cousins showlder, and towld me
cousin to consider himself q prisoner of
war. Me cousin tainted away on the
shpot. You see it is so long since hs
has been arrested in st. Louis that
he was taken by surprise. Take it a
few years ago, and such an episode
would have been looked upon as a
good joke, as divil the clint could ony one
collect from him. But now, when his
wealth is counted be untowled millions,
the case has a different aspect. At this
point of the proceedings me own shtrategy
came in mOighty handy. Says l till the
sheriff, ''please clare the room for few
moments until ! bring the President to
life. The sheriff whit out, when put
me mouth till me cousins ear and gave
him the regular travelling password
''Fishky, and he opened his eyes, and
rachel out his hand for it.
'TNow, Cousin Ulisses," says l, "this
mather demands display of all yer for
titude. Change clothes wild me, and pass
out by the sheriff wild bottle in yer
hand, as if ye were going till a drug
shtore, and whin We are out take a hack
for the dippO, and take the train for Chi
cago as if the very divil was afther you,
and l will follow you"
Arrah, sir, the shtrategy worked like
dose of physic. Me cousin walked
through the sheriff and his posse like q
siedlitz powder, and arrived safely in
Chicago, aud whin the officers came in
the room | tOwld them me cousin had
proved an abb. So / tuck the next
train for Chicago, and all along the road
the people charged me, because had on
me cousins clothes, and said, ''Hello, old
shtick in the mud and all such widen
ce sof appreciation.
We shtayed in Chicago over Sunday,
and got away without being robbed, ex-
cept the collection that was tuck up in
the church. Me cousin put fairly cincts
Until the plate. He is sometimes so reck-
less wild money that he nades q guardian
appointed over him. But | don't think
the church made onything out of that
speculation. 1t happened to be cOmmun-
ion day, and as they passhed around the
bread and wine me cousin Ulisses was in
his drinkingest mood. Says he to me, as
the daycon came along wild the bowl of
wine and plate of bread, says he, "Teddy,
we are entitled to two ratiOns of bread
and wine. You take my rations of bread
and will get swsy wild your ration of
,,;na - And he emntied the howl at one