Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1870-05-06
CURRENT ITEMS.

THE labors of the Mormon preachers in
Long Island have resulted in sixty con-
verts.
TEE man who was hemmed in by. a
crowd, has been troubled with stitch In
his side ever since. "a
You may sometimes stir fire with an
umbrella, but you can never keep the rain
off with poker.
TIE divorces in Ohio last year num-
bered 1903 one divorce to each twenty
four marriages in the STATE. .seh
MANAGEMENT is better than stupidity.
A policy in the Washington is better than
the promises of relatives.
| A New ORLEANS letter-carrier boasts
of having walked 100000 miles during his
| official career of eight years.
THERE is rumor afloat in London that
| Queen Victoria intends to marry prince
of the house of Schleswig Holstein.
A NEW parasol with the handle on one
side, SO as to give the holder the full bene-
fit of the shade, has been introduced.
A YOUNG lady being asked by rich old
bachelor, " if not yourself, who wotld you
rather be?" replied sweetly and modestly,
"yours truly" @aqf 9af~
that women will hereafter be admitted to
medical schools and to medical practice.
A. f. WILLMARTH, Vice. President of the
Home, of New York, is a policy holder,
stock holder and director of the Washing
tor Life.
THE New York Eoendng Post says that
the answer to the question, What is
house without baby?" is."Well COM
paratively quiet"
A FEMALE writer says that young ladies
should have some aim in life. Almost
every one does. She gets beau, then
she aims to get married.
IFyou want to cure scolding wife,
never fail to laugh at her with all your
might until she ceases-then kiss her.
Sure cure and no quack medicine.
A GIRL of sixteen, near Montreal, re-
Gently took arsenic to whiten her COM
plexion. None could question her sue
cess, as she lay in her coffin the following
day.
| SINCE its organization the American
| Colonization Society has received from all
sources the sum of $2,32O711.22, and has
colonized in Liberia $4,000 persons.
AN ex-solder in Sacramento has been
charged 800 in gold by San Francisco
claim agent for collecting back pay due
him amounting to 800 in currency.
AN English collier kept a keg of pow
der under his bed, and the other day went
after some, smoking pipe. When he
went out he took thereof along with him.
A CHILD of Rev. j. Marks, of Marshall,
Wis, one day recently swallowed bean,
which lodged in his windpipe and caused
death in about twenty minutes
THE Presidents Of various benevolent
associations in San Francisco have come
to the conclusion that the free soup sys-
tenn leads to Incidence, pauperism, and
vice.
PARIS consumes 2OS,OOo,OOO francs
worth OF wine, and yet only $4,000, 900
francs is the value that enters the city
from ontside. Hence, 9600O,000 francs
worth must be manufactured there
THREE children of Mrs Perry, of High
Forest, Mimi, were poisoned the other
day by eating what they supposed were
artlchokes and one of them, a little girl,
died from the effects
AN Englishman having paid an Irish
shoepiack with rudsness, was thus &C
costed by the dirty urchin": "My
honey, all the polish you have is upon
II " SNNA sSoN"o1 eshA guy fOu budb
II THE Peoria Oily Transcript says two
men in that city have been experimenting
upon perpetual motion machine-one for
twenty and another for twenty five years.
TIE toughest chicken story comes all
the way from North Carolina "Weldon
has a hen which has laid twenty-seven
eggs, is now trying to hatch twenty seven
chickens from them, and leaves her nest
every day to deposit an egg in another
nest"
AT Elyria, Ohio, a few days ago, a
little girl six years old found paper of
destroy rats, and with childlike curiosity,
utes she was seized with commissions, and
died in less than an hour afterwards.
On the evening of April list two Bow
dom College students, with blackened
faces and shabby clothes, went through
college with subscription paper, stating
that they were trying to obtain the where
withal to return South. Quite sum of
money was subscribed before it was dis
covered to be an april fool"
A LADY residing in Charleston, Mass,
who has suffered lately from an infamed
neck, has been told by her physicians
that it is caused by insects called borers,
inhabiting the Hindoo bark braid of her
| chignon. She has cast away her chignon
and has had her head shaved fearing some
| of the insects had taken up their abode
! In her natural back hair.
DYSPEPSIA cured for So" is the cheer
ing announcement of an advertisement
en- anating from that city of ideas, Boston.
The cure is indicated in two little wood
cuts, giving ife-like representation of
wood saw and saw-horse. This treatment
is recommended to be taken once or twice
per day" sure cure guaranteed or mon
4ey refunded"
In Charlottesville, Va, the other day,
upon the return home of party of young
ladies and gentlemen, who had been prac-
| tlcing at target with pistols, one of
them, Miss Eveline Goodloe, laughingly
| pointed pistol at herself, and was MAX
| ing some playful remark, when the pistol
exploded accidentally, the ball passing di-
rectly through her heart, causing instant
death.
THE NORMAL MUSICAL ACADEMY of the
Northwest holds an Institute course of
two weeks in the Lecture Hall of Cros-
by's Opera Heuse, Chicago, commencing
Aug. 23d, 1870, with the following pow
erful combination of teachers: FL. r.
Palmer, Carlo Bassini, Hans Balatka, Rob-
ert Goldbeck, Dudley Buck, and E. E.
Whittemore. A very interesting pro-
gramme of each days exercises sent to
any one addressing Ell. r. Palmer, Princi-
pal, 70 Crosby's Opera House, Chicago.
4 BENJAMIN FRANKLIN being incompany
once with three Gardeners who were NO