Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1870-11-11
CURRENT ITEMS.
A WonD TO THE WISE Remain so.


all improved plans.
WHAT military command is best suited
to an egotist rs right lst.
A VOLUME that will bring tears to. your
eyes-a volume of smoke. 81.
THE man who would keep his head cool
shouldn't put stove-pipe on 1t.
Why is a won-out shoe like ancient
Greece9 Because 1t once had a Solon
(sole ON s..-
ONE of the pleasantest kinds ofhusband-
ry is that of destroying a widows weeds,
A GOOD protection against misfortune is
a policy in the Mutual Life Insurance
Company, of Chicago.
THE United States fihy-cent piece con.
tains five cents worth more silver than the
Canadian half dollar i.isi .'.fe SO
THERE were recently confined in the Jail
at Cleveland, o., five murderers four of
them wife nurderers. s .i... .4
The Rev. Mr.. Broderick, of Mt. Pleas
ant, Iowa, married couple recently, and
received in payment for his services four
cuclmbers. t--'...
AccoRDiNG to the United States census,
there is a servant girl in Evansville, Ind,
10 years old, who owns real estate worth
$50,O00. .-..... 49, :.
DURING the past six months, two old
buffers of Joliet, Ill, have played 10000
games of seven-up," and the victor was
only four games ahead. .........
20 AN eccentric but observant English trav-
eler says that he has travelled three times
round the globe, and seen but two classes
of peopleTmen and women.
A GOOD many men with "honor' enough
to fight duel about some fancied insult,
will take advantage Of dark night to
'jump" board bill. .u s'
"ARE you not alarmed at the approach of
the King of Terrorsg" said the minister to
a sick man ooh, no; have been living
six and thirty years with the queen of ter
rors--the king cannot be much worse!"
A CHICAGO boy being asked if he had
mother, said he didn't know, as. he hadn't
been home since morning, and when he
left his father and mother were quarrel
ing, with odds in favor of his father, as
he had the hatchet in his hand.
A FARMER near Muscatine, Iowa, who
has an aged father in his employ at cheap
wages, recently lost child, The old man
attended his grandehilFs funeral On set
tlement, the farmer "docked" his father
for the time he lost in attending the child's
funeral.
AN Ohio youth who desired to wed the
object of his affections, had an interview
with her paternal ancestor in which he
stated that although he had no wealth
worth speaking of, yet he was 'chuek full
of work" He got the girl
IT is stated that one of Brigham Young's
| sons is about TO marry tiouriShing female
seminary at Salt Lake City-all but the
| principal and the teacher of music who
are excepted, not from any fault of theil
own, hut because one Of them is married
woman and SO years old, and the other 9
| Frenchman
!; A FAT pupil in one of the schools ol
| Beverly, Mass, was in the act of sitting
/ down, when the shock of EARTHQUAKE
shook the building, which the teacher at.
| tributed to the abrupt manner in which the
lad took his seat, for which offense he was
| required to stand three quarters of an hour
A MAN in Sonoma, Cal, who was too
lazy to chop feed for his aged horse, deter
mined to sharpen the teeth of the charger,
so that he could do his own chopping.
The experiment was a success The horse
died under the operation, and it was not
discovered until all the teeth had been filed.
On some railroads it is customary to
have lock on the stove, to prevent the
passengers from meddling with the fire. A
conductor, being asked why they locked
the stove, replied that it was ito prevent
the fire from going out"
THE Titusville Courier gives this as a
sample of bookkeeping at Red Hot" in
the oil country: Jim Wilson commenced
boarding here the day the big tree fell
Tom Horner one week after Received of
Jim Wilson. .(5) dollars the day Jack got
drunk. Paid his whole bill the day
Smiths wen was torpedoed."
THE wife of farmer in Western
New York thought she was eloping with
the family cow-doctOr, a few nights ago,
but found her own husband in the cow
doctors clothes when they arrived at the
hotel of their destination. The matter
was fixed up and a good supper followed.
A MAN claiming to be John Jarvis, who
was carpenter of the United States ship
Levant when she was lost in the Pacific in
1861, recently made his appearance at his
old home in Norfolk, Va. He states that
he was cast upon an uninhabitcd island,
and was picked off only short time ago
THE Janesville Gazette tells how negro
barber in Clinton shaved one side of a Gus
toner's face, and then demanded the pay
ment of an old debt, which the irate indi-
vidual declined. The barber refused to
finish his job of shaving, and the victim
left the establishment with one side of his
face scaped clean and the other covered
with heavy growth of beard.
THE omnibus and street car companies
in New York city have found that horse
weighing 1000 or 1, 100 pounds is the most
serviceable, and the best food for him is -
pounds of hay a day, 10 pounds corn meal,
and two or three pounds of salt in month.
The hay is cut, moiStened, and the meal
mixed withit. Twenty miles travel day
is expected of him. ''.
A FEW days since a schoolmaster was
teaching a siY.year-old boy the alphabet,
and found that the little fellow staggered
when he came to "I"' "What is that let
let, johnny" said the pedagogue, Don't
| know" squeaked out the urchin. Yes
you dc" put in the teacher. "What have
| got on either side of my nose, Johnnyg :
"Toddy blossoms, SO father SAYS" reioined
the pupil, and took his seat instanter,
THE Lancet, good medical authority, says
| 1t is fact, although curious one, that OF
terrible accident lately, all or very nearly
all, who were asleep at the time-escaped
uinjured-nature's an@sthetic insuring
them not only against fractures and con.
tusions, but even against the bad effects OF
shaking and conclusion.
Ex-GovERNoR PACKER, of Pennsylva
mia, left collection OF old coins valued al
nearly twenty thousand dollars, and sup
posed to be second to but one other collee
tion in the United States. This immense
.Ecolection ne made with great sacrifice o
/ time and money, and it consists of many
rare specimens from a date anterior 10 th'
Christian era down TO the present time,
AN appeal for money whsrewith b
build the National Lincoln Monument a
Washington, d.. O., declares that, Will,
the most elaboIate monument in Europe 1
45 feet in height, has four equestrian life
size statues, and but one colossal figure, th
National Lincoln monument" Is TO b
20 feet in height, with six equestrian ant
thirty-ons pedestrian statues of oolossa
size, the least nine feet in height Will