Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1870-04-29
MINOR mEUT1ON.

Mis-Construction- Getting up"
young lady in the height Of the fashion
Fitz-John Porter is engaged in the coal
business in New York.
Corsets are said to be economical be.
cause they keep women from running
to waist."
In the general fall Of dry goods it is
expected that towelling viii come down
with crash.
Why is a prosy minister like cart
wheel Because the fellows (fsll0es)
around him are tired.
Every plain girl has one consolation ;
though not pretty young lady, she viii
if she lives, be a pretty old one.
A would-be blonde at Albany was dis
covered the other day trying to blanch
her tresses with bar soap and resin.
The Temptation Bow is the latest
and most extensively paronized style Of
neck-tie for the girls Of the period.
A man down in Maine says if he
builds house, he will have folding
doors-''they're so handy in case Of a
funeral"
Easter always falls on the Sunday sue
ceeding the first full moon after March
81, and a great deal Of rain fell with it
this year.
The Exhibition of Historical Hats
ought to include the hat of an Egyptian
with brick in it, made without straw.
An amorous swain declares that he is
so fond Of his girl that he has rubbed the
skin from of his nose by kissing her
shadow on the wall
A long delinquent subscriber 10 a New
Hampshire paper received a copy with
printed slip attached, with his attention
directed to Proverbs III, 27-2S.
Wyoming nurses calm the rising gem
Grafton by singing:
Mice little baby, don't get in q fury,
Case mammals gone 20 SIT on the jury"
A Philadelphia junlz-dealer advertses
that he will buy "old iren copper and
pughter." He should add spelter says
the New York Times.
A young lady being asked by arich old
bachelor, "If not yourself, who would
you rather be r replied sweetly and
modestly, Yours truly"
An old gentleman of eighty-four hay
ing taken to the altar damsel Of about 10
the clergyman said to him, The font Is
at the other side of the church.
Carriers with monogram clasps are
now worn by the pretty girls. They are
rather a novelty yet, but we hope to see
more Of them.
Wendell Phillips said in Faneuil Hall
last week ''I stand here to-day to thank
God for the providence Of the treason of
Andrew Johnson.
A Cincinnati horse RAJ. over a boy
last week, but fortunately mo bones
were broken except his skull" He died
just the same. though Boston Post
"How many children have II" asked
a woman Of spirit rapper. -Four.
''And how many have ] p asked her
husband. 1.-TWO !" was the astonishing
reply. Mistake somewhere.
A Fatal Technicality- Winning have
their rights in Wyoming but then Wy0-
ming can never become fWoming' Ter
ntory And what's to prevent it? Y,
don't you see2-that letter won't let her
Husband-"If were to lose you
would never be such fool as to marry
again. Wife-"If were TO lose you,
would marry again Immediately" Hus-
band-"My death would be regretted by
at least one person. Wife-'By Wh0mr
Aggravating Flippancy-'fIVel, Dear
est, where have you been tonight
Monday Pops, again p "No, Celia I
have spent a most instructive evening
with the 'Anthropological Society.
The 'AnthrOpOhowmuch, Darling p
THE 'Anthropol0g1caL Celia! Are you
deaf?' "How nice And where do they
Anthropoloage, DucSums ?''-FlNrh
There haint been a bug made yet in
yaine, nor one that want a good Job.
Thare IL ever lots of human men loafng
about blacksmith-shops and cider-mills
Ill over the country, that don't seem 10
De necessary for any thing but to beg
plug tobacco, and sware and steal water
but yu let the kolery break out
)nce, and then you will see the wisdom
# having jist sich men lying round
hey help count.-Josh Billings.
A young lady in Galesburg. having
set her cap for a rather large speci-
nen Of the opposite sex. and having
allied to win him, was telling her sor-
-ows to a couple of her conhdants, when
1ne of them comfortcd her with these
words: "Never mind, AIollie, there are
IS good fish in the sea as ever was
caught. "Molie knows that, replied
her little brother; "but she wants
whale !''
Mrs. Anna Cora Mowatt Ritchie writ
ng from London to the San Francisco
says that, in England, TO call
4 leg a limb would be regarded as indel-
cate and affected. That distinguished
ady writes as agreeing with England;
md we decidedly agree with her.---4s71f1
ZoyehHehL
An ant-suffrager breaks forth in the
St. Paul Press:
The "vote" that all are praiEinG
Is not the vote for mei
It's claims are so amazing,
I'd rather far be free
But there's a vote In yonder crib.
A bHby vote, clear, >hrill, and GLIB
That vote Is worth the reising,
And that's The vote for me
Oh that's the vote for mel
The attack Of McFarland's attorney
.pon Mrs. Calhoun is the most infamous
nd atrocious thing in the annals Of
riminal jurisprudence. The man who
Inder pretense of duty 70 his wretched
.lient, thus wantonly assails the reputa-
ion Of an innocent woman, deserves the
corn and contempt Of all mankind
ohio STATE JoiggaL
The New York Post, referring 20 the
leath of Mrs. Emma Willard, at Troy
New York, says; "She had hne poeac
aste, and some Of her verses are tamu-
ar as household words Throughout, the
country especially the devout and eN-
lressive hymn, Rocked in the Cradle OF
he Deep, which was actually composed
~ her during q storm az sea. and viii
continue for years after she has passed
,wav to afford to pious voyagers q COM
ortable expression Of their trust,