The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1870-06-18
| From the Philadelphia "Bee."]
The Census-Taker.
THE TRIALS OF A FAMILY.

THE TRIALS OF A FAMILY
am peaceful man. and so is my wife,
although she is of the female persuasion
60 Let lis have peace" and red, white and
blue picture of General Grant hang together
on the wall over my mantel- piece; but l
can be stirred up, and SO can my wife,
when we consider that our rights are i'll
vaded OF our privileges trampled upon
We are American citizens and understand
what liberty means, and endeavor to carry
out our understanding i'll all things; hence,
my wife washes the pavement, like a good
American citizen, as she is, three times
every day, Sundays excepted. But that S
got nothing to do with the story, further
than it carries us to the place where tho
commencement of it commences.
Thusy (her name is Arathusia, but call
her Thusy out of affectiOn) was washing
the pavement as is her blessed custom,
yesterday morning, while l cooked the
breakfast. When just about turning the
mackerel for the last time, heard her
wel[known voice say:
"Senses! Yes sir, you couldn't have
taken many senses, or else the senses you
did take were as weak as water, or you'd
never planked your big feet on that white
marble step; just the moment I've got it
washed off,"
The man said something which couldn't
understand, but could hear Thusy, and
from the tone of her voice knew she was
riled. I'm we'll acquainted with her.
"You're goin' into the house, are you ?"
The man said he was, and before could
take my apron off, he was in the kitchen.
"Well SIR said Thusy, "since you're
here, and want senses, s'pose you proceed
to get 'em. You needn't look at him."
she continued, $50 go in with your bust
ness and get out;'' and she rested her
broom Oh her arm and sat down, looking
the man in the face.
"We get,' said the man, eve get so
accustomed to going about among people,
that our conduct looks little impudent;
but, madam, I assure you that nothing of
the kind is intended And the man got
cut little book and lead pencil.
Thusy looked at me, as much as to say,
"Tll give him enough" and then he COM
menced asking questions.
care you married ?" he asked.
Thusy's eyes shot fire, and I expected a
rumpus. She looked at me and says:
Blusher, go up stairs and get him our mar
riage certificate"
sob, never mind that" said the man,
''just be kind enough to answer my ques-
TONS"
"That's my husband" said Thusy, nod
ding at me. l had sat down, and the
mackerel was getting cold.
elbow many children have you got %
"Three," said Thusy.
"What are they?''
"Human beings" said Thusy, sharply.
81 mean how many are males and how
many are females - said the man, very
politely.
"Three girls, all females" remarked
Thusy.
"Living? ' said the man.
"Dead,' said Thusy. "Been dead
these ten years"
"Why didn't you say so at firste' said
the man, little mad.
"Cause you didn't ask" said Thusy,
casting triumphant glance at me-
"What is your business at present ~
asked the man, lookin' at me-
"Cookin'," snapped Thusy, before
could say word.
"What is your trade, sir?" said the
man, peintia' at me with his pencil.
"I'm timer" said l.
"What is your incsme?''
"Den't have any, said Thusy. cts
all gone before it comes ill.,"
your salary?'
"You must he fool, +" said Thusy, jump
ing up; "it's out of season.
"Madame, you don't appear to under
stand me. What amount of money do you
receive a week for your work ~
told him, and he put it down.
"IIave you trade, madame ?" he asked
of Thusy.
GA dozen of EN-
"Dress-maker or mantua- maker 90
eyes" said Thusy.
(Which % asked the man.
"Both,' said Thusy.
Anything else?''
eyes"
"What 90
"Slewerin', cookin', washin', mendin',
maxim, readin' and washin' pavements."
"When she said the last she looked at
me again. 1 understood, and could take
my oath to the correctness of the last bust
ness mentioned.
"How many horses have you?''
Gone" said Thusy.
"What's he worth 90
"He was worth about ten dollars, but l
don't suppose he'd fetch more than q dol
lar and a-half new."
''What color is he ~
cred, white and blue
Ridiculous" said the man, putting the
pencil behind his ear. Madame" he
continued, "this won't do. If you have a
horse, what kind of a one is he 90
I thought Thusy would burst. She was
internal mad, for it looked as if the man
was doubling her word.
GA wooden rocking horse !" she
shouted.
The man rose up, and SO did Thusy. I
thought there would be fight before the
thing ended; but the man talked awhile,
and read paper about penalties, and then
went on.
"Any cows?''
"No cows" said Thusy.
"Any watches %
eyes, but you'd better go acress the
street if you want to find out anything
about them.''
''Gold or silver?''
"Of brass, the brassiest," and then she
went on to tell how the McNabbs stood
peeping out of the windows all day.
6 Il