The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1870-10-15
CREAM OF OUR EXCHANGES.

of is the boy who took the measles from his lit
tie sister!
Hare is a sqnib on the war:
Some of our German citizens sleep much Oct
ter since their brothers in Europe have taken a
Nap.
Aman in Oxford, Ind, was bitten by rattle.
snake seventeen years ago, and IA still taking
whisky to cure the bite.
He proposes health or victory. or thereabouts.
At Grass Valley, Cal, young man attempted
suicide, but failed. Abiding to the circum.
stance, local paper remarks: "This young
man Is only 20 years Of age; too young to be 80
rash because he is impecuniOus. As he did not
make success of the Job, We forbear giving his
name. Those who get their names in this pa
DER as suicides must succeed. Success Is the
test of merit"
A back woodsman having visited his daughter
who had been to boarding school five years, re-
turned to his companions and informed them
that 'She can just everlastingls paw. worry
and howi"-a new name for playing the piano,
but fully as expressive as any other.
The Grundy Herald says the Coroner OF that
county is erecting barn. 1t is to be an impos.
ing structure, costing fifty eight dollars and
seventy five cents-being the total amount Of
the Coroner's fees in Gruudy county during
the past year
People don't die worth cent up in little
Grundy.
in that vicinity weighing $50 pounds We
have nc hogs here quite as heavy a. that but we
have greater hogs IN proportion to their size.
They are radical Office seekers.
A box containing black bear was received at
an express Office in San Francisco the other day,
with this inscription Black Bare. Eff yew
don't want to get bit, kepe yer finger outen the
crax.
That advice was more than hearty necessary.
The New York Tribune estimates the loss of
life thus far sustained by France in war at fully
quarter eta million, to say nothing OF the loss
of $4,000 men and nearly thousand cannon by
capture Estimating that the Prussians have
lost as many as the French land they have prob
ably lost more,) the cost of the war in human
life reaches & grand and horrible total of halt
miliOn souls!
And all to crafty the ambition of couple of
despots
A party of highly respectable ladies have
formed society for retaining young men, and
they go about the streets of nights and pick up
young men who show signs of dissi patton, invite
them to their homes, treat them to ice cream,
chicken salad, and all the delicacies of the sea.
son, and then let them 60 home sober. From
the Utmost depths of our heart comes the cry !:
"Why can't we have one of them things here 7"
We would like to be reclaimed awful bad.
The Madison, Ind, Courier Republican, fears
that the radicals will be beaten in that state on
the state ticket. The majority two years ago
was only 800, and the change Of only few hun.
dred will give the victory to the democracy!
All right Go for 'em, democrats.
The Oge county Reporter mentions that seve.
ral young ladies went to hear Gov. Palmer
speak in that section few days ago. Those Ia
dies (2l must DO of that kind who have but little
self respect.
1t is stated that an oyster was caught near
Norfolk, Virginia, recently, that it required six
men TO sw ,llo " the whole
If we know oursef, we would not have been
afraid of that follow alone. 1t requires hefty
ster 10 lntlm1Qate us.
The female school eachers of a county in In.
diana have vetoed corsets. They propose to get
along with different kind of squeezing.
And now able bodied and good looking men
are in demand in that section.
Summer says lecturing is the only way by
which he improve his small means-Er
II he could find some way in which to im.
prove his small mctaess, it would DO we'll
The Coroner OF Brown county, in this state,
the vietita o! q. " sell" lately. He was sum-
mcned out of bed TO hold an inquest on the body
of a man who was dead. His informant omit
ted to SKATE that the fellow to be "sot on" was
dead--dyHnk. The Coroner says, "the next
time that fellow dies, he may die and be d
en'ed a'. inquest"
They .av, Young lady in Posey Co., Ind,
Who w,ig,- 4l2 lbs. She sings: Put me in
II Hn'e N.d, m3'her' She can't get any one
TO do l..
The Jo &Di'.con says "it is sick of be.
i9g GATED hirclng" Well. let i. withdraw
from that party where so many republican pa
prs are hired w work il The cause OF radioalism
and radical otiice.seekcr Come over to the de-.
mooracv, whore every voter AMI newspaper i.
compelled 20 make an homes. living and nobody
is hired. Then the upprobrious opith,t Of hire.
ling" will never be applied to t}o Republican.
N..tss "a .st,,V,9 t,,,. q. Il Il.