The Fremont weekly journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County, Ohio) 1867-1877, 1870-07-08
The girl with the calico dress.

great care - uCCCooetAg ~ -
II should not be imported earlier
than June nor latter than Septem-
her. In the winter it should be
kept in a warm place, where 1t
can hatch out its young.
1t is evident that we are to have
backward season ofgrain. There
fore, it will be well for the farmer to
begin setting oul his corn stalks
aud planting his buckwheat cakes In
July instead of August.
Concerning the pumpkin-This
berry is a favorite with the natives
of the interior of New England, who
prefer it to the goose-beTy for the
making of fruit cake, and who like
wise give it the preference over the
raspberry for feeding COWS, as being
more filing and fully as satisfying.
The pumpkin is the only esculent Of
the orange family that will thrive
in the north, except the goured and
one or two varieties of the squash.
But the custom of planting it in the
front yard with the shrubbery is fast
going out of vogue, for it is now
generally conceded that the pump
kin. as shade tree, is a failure.
People who enjoy the discontinue
of lawvers-and who does not?-
will laugh over this incident:
II call unon you." said the cOun-
sellor, ito state distinctly upon what
authority you are prepared to swear
to the mares agar
upon what authority? said the
hostler interrogatiyely.
"You are to reply, and not to re-
peat the question put to you"
Il doesn't consider a mans bound
to answer a question afore he's time
to turn it in his mind"
@Nothing can be more simple, sir,
than the qustion / put. l again re-
peat it: Upon what authority do
You swear to the animals age|"
"The best authority" responded
he grufly.
"Then why such cTaslonI why
not state it at oncc?"
"Well, then, if you must have it,
-"
"Must! l will have it," vociferated
the counsellor, interrupting the wit
ness.
"Well. then, if you must and will
have it" reioined the hostler, with
impurturable gravity, "why, then, l
had it myself from the mares own
mouth"
A simultaneous burst Of laughter
rang through the court, and the
Judge on the bench could with diff
Guilty confne his risible muscles to
judicial decorum.
Some time since, a prominent
business man ofNorthampton, Mass
achusetts, who began to SOW his wild
oats when a boy, and has not got
all through yet, attended a colored
bail in Market street in that town.
After each ''breakdown" he noticed
that well near the house-by the
wav q shallow one-Was resorted to
by the men to quench their thirst.
Ifnobseryed, while the dance was
going on, he slipped out of the house
and moved the curb a few feet be-
voud the well, and waited the result.
Presently out came one Of the dan
GERS, and plump into the well he went.
Blowing and putting, he came up to
the top, and exclaimed: "By CORY!
who moved dat well since Use out
here last"
AT Oxford, some twenty years
400. q tutor of one Of the colleges
limped in his walk. Stopping one
dav last SUMMER at a railway station,
he was accosted by q well-known pol
itican, who recognized him, and ask
ed him if he was not the chaplain Of
the college at such a time, naming
the year. The doctor replied that
he was. u was there" said the in
terrogator, "and knew you by your
limp" "Wen," said the doctor, "it
seems that my limping made a deep
er impression on you than my
preaching" "Ah, doctor" was the
reply with ready wit, 'it is the high
est compliment we can pay minis
ter to say that he is kRO1Ua By his
sC7yE rather than By his conversation.
The nation is reminded by the
theological agitation now going on
In Boston of Theodore Parker's re
mark to a lunatic, The lunatic met
him and warned him of the approach
ing and imminent destruction and
total collapse of the universe. "Oh,
that don't affect me-" said Parker,
Il live in Boston"
The papers in the interior Of Penn
svivania are engaged in discussing
the tariff as an issue in the next cam
raign; and it is stated that the Dem
ocratic members of Congress who
voted with the free traders during
the present session have but little
chance for denomination.
Lawrence Sterne, who never aspir-
ed to the reputation Of special mo-
ralitv, once wrote: u should never
drink: 1 cannot afford it; it lasts me
three days-the first in SHINING, the
second in suffering, and the third in
repenting.
Snipewinker is a genuine philoso-
pher. He says if you want pair
of boots to last four years, melt and
mix four ounces Of mutton tallow,
apply while warm, place the boots
in a closet, and-go barefoot.
Four George Washingtons. six
Andrew Jacksons, Eve Henry Claws
and two James L. Folks reside at
present in the louisiana Peni en-
tiary.
Florida has 4 man nine feet six
inches high. He enjoys good health
all the way up, and is evidently
long for this world.
There is said to be an old maid
ont West so tough and wrinkled that
they use er forehead to CRATE nut
megs on.