The Shasta courier., 1870-06-18
"A g 9 mt -.
About YalIer Dogs.

When Noah dsembarked at A1arat he
had scarcely touched pier when he proceed
ed 70 tally his passengers He had Just
checked his last item in the list-a Mr.
and Mrs. Bedbug-when the cringine
figure Of a quadruped came sneaking down
the gang plank with its tail between its
legs. "Drat it, if there amt that yallel
dog said Noah, aiming vicious kick
with his brogan at the brute. But with q
facility born Of long and bitter experience
the brute lodged the projectile, and ejacu.
lating Ski (which is Syrian for "de-
clined with thanks or, "not for joe
he disappeared; while Noah, who had his
sea legs on, was unable to recover his
equilibrium, and sat down with emphasis
on the back of his head
Noah arose, and with the style prevalent
amorg the patriarchs, proceeded to soothe
his affronted dignity by pronouncing a
variegated anathema upon the yaller dog,
which had, characteristically, sueaked un-
observed on board, in the confusion of put
ting to sea, and capsized the captain at the
at the first port. He cursed that dog in
body, limb, bark, hide, hair, tail and wag
and all his generation, relations and kind
red by consanguinity or affinity, and his
heirs and assigns. He cursed him with
endless hunger and perpetual fear, with
perennial laziness, with hopeless mango,
with incessah theas and with his tail be
tween his legs He closed his stock OF
maledictions by sparkling display of py-
rotechnics. from the demoralizing effect of
which the yaller dog has never recovered
With this curse sticking to him like "a
revenue stamp, the yaller dog can't help
being "cussed." He don't try to help it,
He follows Noahs programme with a
sneaking fidelity. He is an Ishmaelite
among dogs. He receives the most oppres-
sivc courtesies, in the form of brickbats,
boots, hot water, which makes his life an
animated target excursion He boards
around like district schoolmaster, and it
is meal time with him twenty,four hours
in the day. The rest of the time he hank
ers after something to eat He is too
omnivorous for an cpicurc. Cram him at
Delmonico's, and lie would hunger for des-
sert from an Albany boarding house. He
can't be utilized He is too tired As a
swill-cart locomotive, hunter or sentinel
he is an ignominious failure The dog
churn was a strategic attempt to employ
his waste energies, but butter had too much
selfrespect to 'come" at his persuasion.
So the dog-churn was dropped.
No sausage-maker dare foreclose his lien
on the yaller dog, lest his customers-no
longer ''soothcd and sustained by an unfal
tering trust'-transfer their patronage to
some less audacious dealer The savages
who admire baked dog and who can even
attack tripe and explore the mysteries of
hash, without dismay, acknowledge the
yaller dog to be too much for their gastric
intrepidity.
He always manages to belong to rag
ged, tobacco-chewing, whisky-drinking
master, whose business is swapping dogs,
and evading the dog tax The yaller dog
is acquainted with himself, and he enjoys
the intimacy with edifying contempt He
sinks along through life with diagonal
dog trot, as if in doubt which end of him
was entitled to precedence He is always
pervaded by hang-d sense of guilt, and
when retributive tin ware is fastened to his
tail he "fies from the wrath to come" with
a horrible celerity which ought to be very
suggestive to two-legged sinners of a SINH
lar ordeal in store for them.
The yaller dog is-well to speak in
italics, he is a slouch