Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1870-08-16
aPLlNTE x Rs.

Ants that thrive in all seasons
Clairvoyanrs.
Horses are reasonable they are sat
isfied with a bit.
1t Is not untlertakers who carry the
beer exclusively. .-...
What does 1t take to make pair of
bootsT Two boots.
A small thing to Leep-the right
side Of some people. r ...
The artist who stock a lady" re-
turned her the same day. .......
A business that is always picking
up--A rag gatherer's.
The height Of ingratitude-An artist
cutting his pencil. ..
Every coat rs well rs every man
should 60 on its own hook.
Should old acqllaintaEceS be forgot?
Not II they have money.
Those who have their millions have
4 right to put on airs.
The London Fan says that Nero
was the Pegin-ninny of his day.
Carlyle's last word for obstinate stu
pidity is "JackasSery."
The accrobais of every household
The pitcher and tumbler.
How to reform chimney sweep
Make a clean sweep Of him.
Sic transit-rhe transportation Of
pauper patient to the hospital.
Song of the Radical Congressman
Al I Love, fn sfanl aWhtla aWnv ~
An Iowa girl wants to die. but she
prefers to be smothered with kisses.
Good advice but impossible to prac-
tlce) for the seasom-keep cool.
An old saw newly filed-straws
show which way the tiuid flows.
What kind ola portrait should tee
totaller have: One in water colors.
What game do gambolling waves
generally play ats to pitch and toss?
Show this to your husband-a never
falling cure fore "sulks." Silks.
When the swallows homewartl fly
as soon rs the bartender gets the julep
made.
Men are generally like wagons; they
rattle prodigiously when there is noti-
ing IN them. 81 ~
Some invalided old men get to be
like a page Of music, full Of crotches
and quayers. rr.. .aann
In q Western village COW Of re-
markable trottipg powers IS in tr'lin-
ing for race.
When women come to sit in the jury
box possibly infants may get to be
criers In courts.
When does the rain become too IA
miliar to a lady? When 1t begins to
patter on her back.
Some fast young men go to blazers
OH dog-cart; but the proper way Is
on tire engine. Ef.Is
The Des Moines Bulletin announces
births under the head Of Spring
Chickens"
a benevolent gentleman has dis
covered that In forty years 4 snllff
taker devotes twenty-four months to
blowing his nose.
A Western paper thinks that women
would not make good statesmen.
The question Of the age would al
ways trouble them.
The New York papers say the spring
suits for ladies are ornamented with
everything t" from Jacobs ladder to Il
pen-wiper in silk" .r#.-
\ young lady in the rural districts
likes Mr.. Chromo's picture about rs
we'll as anybodr'S.
.,,.o L. 'ran IN man ynnsv
come to pay him money. 1t beats
acoustic oil all hollow.
Why Is lawyer like sawyer? Be-
cause whichever way he moves, down
must come the dust.
Interesting to itinerant circus COM
panIes-you can make your tents
waterproof by pitching them.
Why is a fellow getting drunk and
swearing up stairs like good man?
Because he is above doing 4 bad act.
womens rights are respected 10 the
Iowa penitentiary. The female con-
victs do the same work rs the men.
What part does every 'right-p,rpo.-
ell citizen occupy in the chariot Of
state? He is spoke in the common
veal. 2. ..I-.. 700
Angelic-An actress of rather angu-
lar proportions lately received a love
letter commencing -'' Ny deares.
.ags'." ~-.a.
"en II q woman had as many locks
~. heart rs she has upon her
Sp ,S..,d. a c,, inning rogue would lind his
way into it. , .
"a cat may ,,ook"-the picture of
,,rnee,Se. but don't leave her alone
with the canary. ...--..---