, 1870-03-27
Ray of Hope for Female Extreme
ties.
Burnett,
a Few Words In Memoriam..
AnUSer entS.


Why did ask such = question:
1don't know. You should be content with
| the fact that I asked it. s.
A great many unaecountable things happen
in this world Did you ever guess tho riddle
| Of tho Sphynx BY looking into it's staring,
stony oyes? Or did you ever, by the most
rigid investigation, find out why the man fried
his bootas Or why Kearney preferred cat
| ekin to e1mine2
| You see there are many strange things in
this world Each Ole moves, and has his be-
ing in little cloud Of mystery; and that ia
| and c.ulihowo1, suppose
| Ihope tlas is sufficient answer to that gar
rulous young creature who interrupted me,
some very eloquent remarks might hare
| uade concerning salmon and cauliaowers.
| yoia!=
Which reminds me to ssr that the other day
q ehopkeeper handed me half dollar in chang
| ing hll-a genuine, round, silver half do1lar
| with the Goddess OF Liberty sitting comforts
BY On one side, and spread eagle, looking
very much Ike goose, On tho other. / took
it to the Oldest Inllabitant and he remembered
distinctly when they used to circulate here. It
was at the time when t1e untamed savage
chased the wild antelope up and down Third
avenue; when Seth Paine sold dry goods and
Newberry Dole raised potatoes on Clark
street and the Oldest Inhabitant himself used
to get drunk at the United States Hotel, mp at
the forks Of the river, and then o. I. com
menced diaquiEition on the resumption OF
specie payment. As found it would take him
| Just three hours to explain his plan, which he
bring salvation to this istIacted country, and
as I wss convinced shouldn't know any moro
when he got through than when to COM
menced, l left o. I. in the midst OF an elo-
quent passage where ho was elucidsting the
| relations Of coupons to the flow Of gold and
tho validity Of first mort tgagss.
In tie meantime, have cut the Gordian
knot By 1esuming. The ehopkeeper paid me \
| bali dollar, and have paid it to somebody
else. II I ever get another one shall 60
and do likewise again. This manner OF pro-
cedure may not be according to the plans Of
| Congress from this district, but it is none the
| less fact This il where have this aIsan-
| tage over Jay Cooke, you Soc
II is funny that because some others and
| singers should be asked to exchange their
| notes for less paper. But 80 it is, and al over
the country the churches are economiziDg At
| the choir end, and reducing salaries. I think
some Of them make great mistake By. not
cutting down At the pulpit end 1t takes
/ salaries. But it isn't altogether the fault Of
the churches that tho sala.ies Of the singers
are coming down. The nightirgales and bull
frogs in the organ loft are quite as much to
blame. It may be set down
- choir ' singer S the most
Inconsistent, unapptoachablc, infalIblo, and
balcony creature among animals. The occu-
patton, I have no doubt, is 1aborious. When
four people and an organ have to do the pzais-
: &A.- &c.,
certain rats per diem, organ-blower found, the
| strain upon ones soul, not to speak Of the
| laz3nx, must be considerable.
Il is unfortunate that all our sopranos aro
rattis; Ill our altos, Abonis Ill our tenors,
Lefrancs; all our bassos, Lablaches, and al
music adapted for them The world Is ful Of
sacred music; hut how much Of it is nBod
In its place the artists q IN tho choir loft give
ns the duos in Martha tho !sio from IA A., /;
the t1etnnlos rro1n - oberon," the songs from
stst1adelIa7" the bass numbers from d Tho
Magic Flute." and the pirouetting strnlns
Of the " Black CROOK" Itwon1d not surprise
family pew, full Of conventional dignity and
approp1iate SERIOUSNESS, to hear !" Oh! Thou
from whom al goodness lows sung to that
Internal tune of st Shoe Fly" With solos by
der how yon yas" between the prayer and
eermnn. Now am not prepared to sdInit that
secular music pr Sc i Improper. On the !.
other hand, believe that al music OF itself is
sacred. Rut there is time and place Tor AL
ttlngB- There are associations abont this class
OF mu5c which render it unfit for church ser
| vice. When hear some sac1ed words Sung to
the music Of tho It Lost Prescribed" Camp
hell and Castle arc ever before ny eyes, and
the pretty Mrs. Seguin is flirting over the
stage. When I hear 81 The Heart Bowed
is nHi cutting nf hseapers. And tomorrow, vben
hear ssShoo Fly" Benjamin Cotton and hob
| c.t Hart Will be before me, instead Of Rey. NJ
Cream Cheese. Now all ttss7s music is we'll
enough in its place, but the suggestions ii
brings to me At the head Of my pew are not
| devotional at all.
suppose this music il used because it is
p1etty, and affords an opportunity for the SO
rrano or tenor artist to display herself and
himself. That doean't help the matter ut all.
After you have heard an oparatic aria sung by,
some great lyric artist on tho stage, you don't
want to hear it sung by some great choir artist,
because the choir artist, great as he OF she may
be, cannot sing it IS we'll AZ the stage artist.
Thus it is that when I hear this style Of
vocal music instead OF accepting with
ter that am . miserable sinner, am proving
myee1f such By internally cursing at the sing
| ing. How can assumc . devotional frame OF
mind at hearing one Of my fayorite arms
wlenchsd out Of It's proper place, harmonizsd
. A1AA%A3AAAAGAA
wouldn't hesitate to tinker and tampet with the
blasts Of GabrieIs trumpet or the songs Of tue
scraphim, twisted and distorted all out o1
shape, and having no sympathy with the wor1s
put to it? To me it would be just as appropT'
ate for Rev. Al1. Cream Cheeee to come down
out Of the pulpit and dance the cancan mp and
down the aisle With Sister Brown, while the
| artist at the orga1 played &C pos, ce pas, q
petit, peti pas in slow tempo
Nov don't think want to hear tho old pou'
/ r -. Il 10 ~1or1 T1nI
is going to the other e1trerne- Next to Shoe
Fly," do sbunninAte pennyrOyAa. l think OIL
ancestors wasted great deal Of breath upor
them, and threw away great deal OF praise
for it would La accusing Heaven OF possessing
an excruciatingly bad taste to suppose that j!
the repertoire of sacred music, written " IN
fDired masters Of song, to the praise Of God
il go full and 30 rich that a choir might sing
; fo1 its natural lifetime, and then only com
| mence upon the treasured.
So don't have much sympathy Tor the choi1
singers after all, you Bee. In fact, | think
shall get some revenge out OF this cutting
| down Of salar,ea, for tho many deeds OF VIC
lcnce have been compelled to witness, tbs
musical murders, the melodious assaults ane
| batteries, the gafrotings OF gamuts, the ham
| tnerings Of ha1monies, and the tinke11ngs o1
don't sympathize with them At all, m,
noro than 1 sympathize With hearney. dt
had been in the Board Of Supervisors lonl
enough to know better. There arc soms
! things in which confess I Like Kearney; Ht
is a philosopher. He sees joke in everything
There is no Heraclitus abont him. When Ga
! btiel blows his trump, Kearnoy Will come ~
smiling and SEQ joke in eve1y blast Of 81
instrument: It is great blessing N tnu
down to joke, for the world is nothing but
huge Joke anyway, and we spend our lives -
inE to see the point of it. kearney seea it b,
iatrition. The sun 'winks its fiery ego ant
e1nileB at Kearney. Chaste Dian puts be
effulgent thumb upon her nose and e5lates
her fSncers for Keazney,s benefit. The star
Elm M their h.nas upon their ribs aud shake al
over wLeu they look upon Kea1ney- AL m
t1re er1iles for Kearney, and when burly WIND!
rush down steep mountain sides, they gunaV
But row Ills facetious funny man could hay!
mai,c such ; mistake gives mo pause. l
s,.e1a eaa,oa " ma almost incredible that mai
conld hive been IN the Board of Supervisor
for = vear. sitting under roof wh1ch, An,
minute MIGHT bare let the Day Of Judgnon
in upon him, standing upon the b11nk o. y ..
| ctarnitv which might ''buekle" At any lns1Ant ~
aud not know that it uas wrong 70 go IN 10
cstskin f11rs aud a $500 lot in . Cicero swami
: hole! There may be a hidden joke II tn
which onIr Kea1ney can see. But Am regard
ing tLis question from moral point Of vio7.
: In the rnaer ages OF the world, before the ~
} vent of the steam engine and the telegraph
/ and the invention Of pecuniary embarrassment !:
and filuciary irregularities, and as yet the ilEh
: OF the ninnteenth century was only Lam
gEmmer on the horizon OF thu ages, the 1up
per Of TINT day sang: = e i; s,,
S To stcal pin;
: 1tiB q greater
To SteAl 3 tater."
= But civilization has advanced since taae DAY
= | And yet here is Kcarncy accused OF bribery !
= | taEinry r.fnkfu FIR and A SWNtnr lot and got