Vicksburg weekly herald. (Vicksburg, Miss.) 1868-1883, 1870-09-10

49NN 1AAAShs AutAas ANNAtyealFin
MIsTHER PUMMERY.-Ye mind
that passage of scripture fhich
says "All men are created fraa and
aqual, endowed wild uncertain
fhatailysouable rights, among
fhich are life, deliberately pursued
happiness, and the like" Nc
Cusin Ullsses said 10 me on Sun
day, "Teddy, bring me the BibleF'
Be gorra ! thought the man was
crazy, and / didn't know fhetheF
it was besht to indulge him in his
wild rawlings or not. It firsht Oc-
CURED to me he had neglected to
get vaccinated, and that he might
have caught that cutaueous dis
ease called repentance" that has
been prevailing to q great extent
at a camp-meeting near here, and
has carried Off some of our mOsht
hardened sinners. Then 1 medi-
tated that the disease musht have
tuck a moighty firm howled on
him to cause him to cry out for
the Bible so sudden, whin divil
the glance had he given the good
book since the early part Of his
life, whin he performed in q circus
on wake days, and attinded Sun
day School ON the Lords day, at
the suggestion Of ovid Jesse, who
always Suggested" such things
to me cousin wild q raw hide. As
l was saying, ! feared to give him
the Bible on such short
notice, 80 / took a leather.cov-
cred book, presented to me cousin
be q Dimmecrat who thought me
cousin detiCienr in knowledge Of
the wording Of the Constitution
and the Declaration of Indepen-
dence, and some such dead Ian
guages. handed me cousin this
book, fhich he never saw before,
and he first thing that shtruck his
eyes was the passage quoted
above, and after reading it he
never knew before that the Bible
contained such beautiful language.
He said 1t was aqual, in point Of
literary merit and convincing ar
gument, to Onything in "Claude
Duval' or Graylay's economical
politics" Then says he till me,
"Terence, have me carriage sad
died up, and me thrunk and me
wife packed at an early hour
the morrow, and I will throw of.
the cares Of office, and 90 to
Newport to recuperate me ex-
hausted energies. The Bible says
all men are entitled to the pur-
shoots Of happiness, und l will
pursue her, even unto Rhode
Island. If the people Of New
port know their business, as ! am
informed they do, and presint me
wild O bether house than the one
we now live In, we shall move
there Immediately, and, be our
presence, give character till the
house. In the language of beau
tiful Franco, cav Reservoir"
At an early hour on the follow
ing morning SOLITARY horseman
might have been seen," in q car
riage wild q valise containing five
BOTTLES of cholera medicine and
cigars enough 10 kape the BOTTLES
from breaking, and the solitary
horseman's wife, on the way till
the dippo. AS the train moved
off, containing the head and so
forth of this great nation, includ-
ing the cholera medicine, the
aforesaid head handed me the fol-
lowing note, written wild q lead
pencil on a pine shlngle:
To Terrence McGrant, Assistant
President of the United States
STR-During the three days abb
sence Of the Chief Magistrate, and
the absence Of the Vice President,
who is unaccountably neglecting
his duties by making speeches in
the West, the cares and response
bilities of President will deyolve
upon you. You will proceed to
carry out all plans that l may have
inaugurated, and support my
previously expressed opinions in
everything, so far as my plans and
opinions may be known to you.
Let us have peace. Bridget has
the key to the wine-cellar.
ULIssEs l.
0ny man that has iver been left
in charge Of great responsibilities
can imagine me feeling as l wen
did me way from the dippo till the
cottage on the bache. l ponder
ed over that note till me head
ached, thrying to think fiat plans
he had iver inaugurated, but divil
the won could / think of, except q
plan to get Bonner TO prisent him
wild Dexter, fhich didn't appear to
work. Thin l tried to remember
that opinion he had ever express
ed, fhich / was expected to main
tain, but divil the opinion could /
bring to mind except those he had
expressed wild regard to flshky
and cigars. But l gave up thry-
ing to fathom the mystery, as /
knew Bridget could see through it
In a minute Arriving at the cot
tage, 1 tuck me seat In me cousins
official chair. and ringing the bell,