Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-01
INTIMATE ETIQUETTE.
How Far Familiarity should DC
Tolerated.

How Far Familiarity should DC
Tolerated.
''Shirlcy Dare concludes fashionable
letter in ulc Chicago RcpUbiicou with
the following:
Somebody wants Il chapter on what
may be termed intimate etiquette. This
Is touched by such inquiries rs we see in
The correspondent columns of ladies
papers, where Lucia wants TO know if she
ought 10 allow a gentleman to kiss her
E,hrn she comes home with him from a
concert, and Caroline is dubious whether
she ought % correspond with her friends
bctrothCl in secret One can't but sym
pathizc with the young ladies, knowing
how incOnsidcratcly some has neglected
duty toward them. Mothers and guar
Gians seem often TO fancy that knowledge
how 10 conduct ones self ia
the delicate dilcmmas OF life comes
by instinct. Girls leave boarding
school and 90 into society with The yagucsi
of notions about their relations to it, and
stumble through its small difficulties,
hiding their CmbarTassmcnts as best they
can, keeping brave front TO the last,
while the world never gUesses the secret
fortunes they undergo in tritiDg matters.
Often enough for mere restless craving for
novel condolences, young ladies seek pub
lie instead of private advice, when their
mothers or friends are ready and Compc-
tent TO give them al the help they need
But there is a great deal of trial that be
sets young girls at the age when they feel
ailurcs most kccnly, which the best pa
rents forget to provide against They
ought to recall their own debates of
etiquette in youth, and teach their chill
dren prudence before they need it.
Forewarncd, fOTcarmcd
Nellie, see here, says a prudent faith
or TO his GIL Of sixteen, in her taTlc an
hall dress, warming her slippers before the
fire, waiting her cscOTt-if girls ever do
any of the waiting. You're looking
swccliv fresh tonight, and as fresh in
heart as in dress, l hope. Nou are TO
stay so, DO you hear, mUdchcd? You're
not 10 let people hold you close " hen you
waltz; nobody has any business t. touch
You till you have a lover or husband of
your own. ! don't want my girl talked
about. Remember, nobody has the least
right, on any pICtcnsc, to do more than
touch your fingers or lay bis hand on you
in the permitted freedom of The waltz,
unless lie is your relative OF going To be.
And after that she would probably sit
IN The conservatory, letting handsome
Jack, the fast flat and lady killer, slip bis
arm by degree from the back Of her
chair, liit her lOCket from her bare neck,
and kiss her hand ill nc dared kiss her
lips, and gather her close 10 him which
would probably he the sixth time they had
met at farhCst. You sec men and women
ike such tnings
at is right ,hcy should I'm not 90
in- to belle the blood that beats in this
wrist ono instant, 90 say they should moi.
Only one may have some choice as to
whether one viii accept CarcssCs from the
wholesome stock of natural liking or the
special, reserved fund Of precious per
Torrance. Suppose, young warm heart
cd girl, that as you lean on that broad
shoulder in the half-lil paTlOr tonight,
thinking how nice il is 10 have somebody
fond and protecting, and how dear you
seem to be 10 him, suppose you should by
some invisible magnetic sense, be made
aware of all the checks that had rested
on that shoulder, and all the forms that
arm had CnCirclc1 Is fortunate you
don't know these things It might lead
YOU, however, 10 keep yourself more
sacred for some one who viii love You as
entirely as Won love This man. who takes
life as il comes, and by force or habit, if
not by inclination, could not remember
ono woman six months il his happiness
depended upon II.
did you ever see the old fashion book
on cliqucie called the young Lady s
Friend :" Good Mrs. Fauas will never
guess the benefit that straightforward
wholesome book Of advice has been 90
girls She knew The class she was writing
Tor, and gave her opinion in such frank
words as these, / quote from memory:
"YOu are to allow he personal freedoms
from gcnilCmCuOf your acquaintance. II
a finger is put out 10 examine a loCkct OF
chain on your dress, draw back and take
it off for inspection if you choose. The
reason for this rule is clear TO those better
acquainted with the world.
''Tbc reason Is perfectly clear 30 every
one who comes 10 twenty-five years of
acc outside reformed institution. A
man Of society, who dealt in occasional
rOughncss of speech, said once in a par
ior before ladies that he would never mar
ry "a then New York girl of fashion, tol
She class allowed themselves TO he handled
too much y gIl who protects hcTScl'
from the freedom too much IN vogue III
society, increases her own value, II she
only Encw a. with those she may have u
IcpulSC. don believe IN prualshnc'5 OF
suspicion hd' uo hchcVc lHaI Nhcn men
ana women arc not content WIN 'I'
iiIta"'hl9 'ha, can nc cAllCs.co ny lI@A"'