, 1870-06-26
JERSEY LIGHTNING,"
Josh Billings Tells What Ho Know,
Ah0uI IL

J0ea HtUlUE1 Tells What Ho Knows
About 1t.
Who it waz that invented alcohol an uns.
bio lew toll without Icing; but it would hav
bin fust k!ass bleaaing for tho rnat Of NJ II
tue and the lickor had both ov them been split
on the ground and nersr bin eopped mp since,
The Devil himself, with all hik genius for
ten strike, could not have rolled ball more
eerriceabie Tor biz blzneas On Garth; one more
certain to quarter on the head pin, and aweep
stool Pigeon, biz right bower, hiz high, low,
jack, and the game.
A crate menny, with dyBpeptic morals, arev
that Icko1 is indispeusibel for manufacturing
and doktor purposes, and also for mekAnikal
uses, md thcI bold shat W koullnt r1ize
JeoakA rum. and sum say that pudding sass,
without emmy spirits In it, L. no healthier thai
common goose grease
But aul or these atgys are furnished, free ov
cost, By the Devil himself, and emmy man who
advances them IL telling without Knowing II.
pcrphapa. (liea that will weigh, at = run esti-
mate, At least d pound apiecs- But my OBJ
teckt in these fu Preliminus remarks Il ten
sit good chance to tell what I know Abou,
"Jeraey lightning" (one ov aicohoI's itnps.)
as : manufacturing znd metaphysical agent.
jersey lightning: Il cidos brandy, three hour
ofd, stubborn, and quicker than ilaah. This
juice IL drunk raw by all tho old sports, aud
makes pHemouitozy and hisaiug noize ~ il
winds down the thrut, like an old she goose
setting on eggs, or hot iron stuck into ice.
wafer. Three horns day of this Nkkef will
tan mans interior In si1 months, go thst
he kAn swallow Gva, kix-footed krab, feet
faet, and not waste = wink.
Il don't fat a man (cider brandy don't) ike
wtsinkec dug, but Fuckers him up Ike fried po-
thtoxo- Il man kan survive tho fust three
years Of Jersey lightning, he il safe then for
tho neat Is years tew cum, and keeps looking
every day moro Like three ycar old red pep
per POD, hotter and hotter. An old eider
brandy drinksr viii steam, In : sudden shower
OF rain, ika pile ov stable manure, and tiz
bteeth anella like the bnngholo OF ram cask
lately ernptye6.
-, When 1ersey lightning il fust born il tastes
like blleing tuIpenGne and cayone, half-&nd
half. and viii r1ize blood blister on pair
ot old koNhido hrogsns In Is ninni.s, and ap-
piled externally will curo the rumxtisua or kiE]
the patient, forget which. The fuBt horn
man takes ov this liekor will make him think
he h3s swallowed gas Light and he viii 50
kant. Tho eyes Of an old ciIarhEandst look
Like deep gaahea kut into \ ripe tomato, his
noxa IL the konplexahun ov half-biled lob
ster, and tho gzizzlo In hit guliet esicks out
like an elbo in 4 tinlender.
Ihs moro villa1nous tho drink the more IN
vetel1te are those who drink It. kac. tell
yer Whether cadar brandee will shorten N old
sucke1e days q not. for thsy generally out
live Al tha tch ov the nAhorB, aud die jtBt as
soon rs the old tavern stand charges hands
and u opened on temperance principles. One
bottle oy sassara,illa or ginger rorp is ~ ia
tz1 tew thexa old SelleEs n rihe ball IL teH .
I would do ainaoste ennytbiug lmt uaurlc.
tew save = yung man from Jersev lightning,
but trieing tew elve N old one u like trietug
tew put tho fire out ov \ holler log, yu might
II wnll let ii burn up, for tho ashes L. worth
Nrvfv