The Bloomfield times. [volume] (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, 1870-07-05

40 we Salu DeIoTe, your size protects
you, sir" said we in a freezing manner.
" What pursuit are you engaged in ?"
he gruifly asked.
nasmuch as you put us down as
seaman, we presume we are engaged in
nautical pursuits, otherwise we should
have said that we are in pursuit of hap
piness, like all mortals, missing it," lie
dropped on himself at the mention of
seaman"
so did-seamen. That was queer
mistake on my part What is your bust
ness anyhow? How does your income
come in p
From our chdtcuC en- Espngne.
"What's them?" inquired the G. r.,
rather perplexed.
Castles in Spain"
Castles in Spain, eh? How many
castles have you in Spain?"
oh, they einnumerable. We build
them daily"
Say, look here young feler; this
things been going on long enough" roar
cd out the G. Y. "Your castles are cas-
ties in the air, l fancy Refusal to an
swer and lie" Two marks went down
against US at thirty dollars mark.
" Ar, you the agent of the Slokum
family :" asked the G. T.
" Sole agent for the United States and
Canada; also Europe, Asia, Africa and
outIaying places"
" How many does the family consist
of, sir?
" One. You see the entire family
One and indivisabe. Look at him."
" No brothers and sisters, fathers and
mothers, eh :"
" Brothers and sisters-n-law, lots of
EN-, we had, aud seven mothcrs-in-law
but escaped them by divorce, and are
happy" -Four marks-one hundred and
twenty dolars-went down against us in
the lie column. We uttered no remon-
STRANGE, but let the G. r. take our census
in his own way, satisfied that he would
do so anyhow.
Got any horses, cattle, or live stock
of any kind?"
Yes have hawser. a colt, q ram,
two calves six kids, deer, number of
hares, and-well we believe that's about
all the live stock we possess"
"What's the horse ?"
What horse 7"
Didn't you just say you had horse,
sir?"
Yes, we said we had hawser-
h-a-w Ser"
eco on, young feller, if you think you
can afford to pay for the amusement"
said the G. T., " sarcastic"
You mentioned colt, believe" he
continued.
Yes, and here it is" we said, display
ing small-sized Colt
H'm Well, don't let it go Off |
know the pace Of that breed of colts
it's killing one. How about that ram,
and the calves?
The ram is of the hydraulic strain,
and the calyes-here they are, just below
our knees. Here are our kids" and we
showed him three pair Of Alexander
breed. " AS for the hairs, our head is
at your service if you wish to count
them"
Gwen lump them. But how about
the deer ?"
awe decline to answer any cues
tions about her while she continues
to reign in this bosom, and is so dear
to us"
" She must be reindeer" said the
G. T., with hoarse langh. 1t was the
first joke he was guilty of. But as we
put it right into his mouth, he deserved
no credit therefor.
See here, young feller," he said stern
ly, 4" these yarns about your cattle, and
live stock generally, are not exactly lies,
they are evasions, and will be charged
against you as deliberate lies, at thirty
dollars head. Your troop of hares will
cost you fifteen hundred dollars only, as
shall place but fifty marks against you
on account of these animals. You have
about one hundred and twenty-five lies
charged to your account, thus far, and if
every body does only twentieth part as
as well, the national debt will be lied out
Of existence, with dollar or two to
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