Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1870-05-20
REMARK ON INSUlSENTS.
BY JOSH BILLINGS, JR.

/ hev been reeding il an Alminick, made
by cussin Of mine, who is pos:id in the in.
surents Dizziness, and beg leave to send
| you few extracks of hissen and few ad-
dishuns of mine, which will doubtless be in.
struc,iye TO the ignerent porshen Of your
| readers the wize wuns no all about such
things and tha nedn' reed no further.
sIGHNs.
When man gifts burned ont m:steerius-
y it is sign he's well insured.
DOMESTIC EEcEIrTs.
Tew make muney, insure yure ole barns
and bile soap in 'em. hev knone fellers
20 make hundred dollars over aud above
| expencis in weaks, in this way.
Tew make mans meneness vishual tew
the naked j, try tew settle his insurents af.
ter fire.
SAYINGS AND THINGS.
If ynre only we'll inshured fire IL q
blessin in disgize; but when you hev bin
blest sevril times this way, it amt disgized
SO much.
Inshuren;s IL tew some what flint il tew
steal-it provokes blaz.
A lively immsgineation is worth muney
tew you in making prufe of los. If you
kant make the inyintory equil tew yure in
surents git naber tew help you.
The origin Of fires and the origin of the
Kardif jiant is twin sisters-no kards.
EVENTS, PRoGyosTIx AN ADVICE.
MAy-Git yure policies in the ole of the
mune.
JrSE-stack yure hay and git reddy fur
an axidentile distrukshun of yure barns and
contents.
JuLY-This munth pizen yure lame hos
ses and sick kows in thunder storm. You
may think they war struck by lightnin,
specially if .ha are insured with hghtnin
claws.
Arcusr Philadelphy, 1869, CRATE
eggsperement to prove that whiskee wood
burn. 1t proved succksess.
DEcEMBEg-It sad time to burn out
in the winter, but if you hev been preparin
fur it all summer, let her rip.
what Thackcray Saw In u Tca-CuP.
Mr.. Thackeray furnishes us with the pref
ticst little synopsis that we know of-at
orce graceful, tender and picturesque-of
tea drinking womankind. True, be makes
George Warrington laugh at Pendennis for
patronizing the tea cup, while be is taking
another swig at the beer. "Pen drinks tea"
he tells the Mayor otis only fit for old wo
men," But turc to the chapter where Capt.
Shandon shutfles off to drink away his new
ly acquired five pound note, iiddling at it
in his waistcoat, while his poor. patient,
wasted wife turns sadly aside after vain
protest; she hoped to have him to dinner
herself to-day-but he was off TO the tavern,
and there was no chance Of that now. "So
Mrs. Shandon went to the cupboard,
and, in lieu of a dinner, made herself some
tea. And in those varieties of pain Of which
we,spoke about, what conidant has that
poor teapot played ever since the kindly
plant was introduced among us What
myriads of women have cried over it, TO be
sure What sick-beds it has smoked by ]!
What fevered lips have received refreshment
by it! Nature meant very kindly by wo
man when she made the tea-plant. With a
little thought, what series of pictures and
groups the fancy may coniure up and as
semble round the teapot and cup. Melissa
and Sacharissa are talking love over it. Poor
Polly has it, and her lovers letters upon the
table his letter who was her lover yester-
day, and when it was with pleasure, not des-
pair, she wept over them. Mary comes
tripping noisclessly into her mothers bed
room, bearing cup of the consoler to the
widow who will take no other food. Ruth
is busy concoc,ing it for her husband, who
is coming home from the harvest feld-one
could fill a page with hints for such pic
lures; finally, Mrs. Shandon and little Ma
~ sit down and drink their tea together,
while the Captain goes out and takes his
pleasure. She cares for nothing else but
that, "when her father is away" Why was
not page filled with hints for more such
pictures-or who would not welcome plu-
raj page Of them, from painter of SO much
feeling, and taste, and delicacy Of touch