The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1870-04-07
agit and aluuor.
Good lor Rheumatism.

INST 4 cOttc1et ltnlutu, uot many lCutn
since, queer geaius by the name of
Daniel Dougherty, or, as he was more
familiarity called, Uncle Dan Dorty "
Unele Dan was said in his youth TO
have been rare rollicking chap, fond
Of fun and whiskey, and ready at all
times for fight or frolic; but as years
crowded upon him, aud the frosts Of age
whitened his locks, he became intensely
pious, attached himself to that branch
Of the visible church known as Hard
Shells or Iron Jackets" aud essayed
70 lead in prayer at monthly meetings
or exhort from the pulpit as occasion
presented.
In person he was tall, raw oned aud
stoop-shouldered, with immense hands
and feet. lie walked with shutting
gait something like that of an oyergrown
bear; in fact walking was, as he ex-
pressed il, one Of his greatest curses.
Uncle Dan was an invalid, and had
studied his case as set forth in the pages
Of DR.. Gums Domestic Medicine, Until
he had become mono maniac on the
subject, and rarely left home without
carrying a copy Of that work with him
along with his Bible and hymn. book.
Rheumatism was the peculiar form of
his disease, and to efiectually eradicate
this from his system at once aud forever
nc learned from Dr. Gum that nothing
was equal to a good sulphur bath.
After waiting some time for an OPP
portunity to test its merits, he finally
chose bright Sabbath day in June,
and that, too, regret to say, the S.b-
bath Of the monthly meeting, which was
held about mile from his residence.
Having resolved upon the time, I'm
Gle Dan waited patiently until the mem.
bers of his household had gone to the
meeting (himself feigning illness, aud
then set about his preparation for the
bath. He first procured large cask
or hogshead, open at the upper end /;
this he placed upright, and having pre-
pared quantity Of sulphur and matches,
Ne proceeded to Chamber into the cask.
having taken precaution to furnish him
self with Blanket to cover the mouth
OF the cask and thereby prevent the
fumes of the burning sulphur from suf-
locating him.
Everything being in readiness, Uncle
Dan lit his matches and endeayored to
draw the blanket so as to prevent the
burning sulphur from reaching his
olfactories. But alas his blanket was
too small, and he was upon the verge of
suffocation when in a frantic effort to
escape from the cask, it was overturned
aud rolled down gentle declivity, car
rying the unfortunate occupant with it.
The cask had rolled but short distance
when it pumped against bee stand,
overturned it, whereupon about a peck
Of enraged bees with eommendab.e
promptitude, began paying their respects
to Uncle Dan, who being in state of
nudity was highly vulnerable to their
attacks. With loud scream he leaped
from the cask and struck bee line for
pond in meadow half mile distant
the bees making black streak after
him as he ran, raging, buzzing, singing
bees, about one third of hich succeeded
in alighting upon him, while the re-
mainder were close behind him. lie
said he could hear the !. onsapeti6e5
brutes'' whistliue through the air Ike
so many rife balls. On thew want
through gardens over fences dawn the
hin, Uncle Dan all the while takipr
most frantic leans in the air and SLAM
niuo h;mself with his hands II mr.
vaiiing efforts to free himself from his
tor,nentors. The poud on the meadow
would soon be reached but fresh
difficulty rrose--ho had to pass n herd
Of cattle in his fight across The meadow
and a patriarchal bull thinking Uncle
Dan a strange animal Immediately rave
chase. About quart of bees failing
..-l II -