davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

You've got precious little sense il you
think you can make q young gal love
just who you pleased Minty don't
like nobody but Jerry Short; and
Jerry is an honest, clever. fellow
handsome enough, and plenty good for
Minty, and il / had my tcay, .at
"But thank my stars! you haven't
your own way. and won't have while I
live--so, jest dry up your sniyeling!--
am in no humor for sarmount to-
night, and won't listen to one, neith-
er. II l ever catch that long-legged
Short on my pemises again III break
his neck, I viii. will; and you Mss
If ever catch yon talking to him
again, I'll whip you half TO death,
will. Get you to bed now. sand m'nd
,oah I say"
Longs old COW breakfasted next
morning on breeches-all but the
jack knife and twist of tobacco. She
had no stomach for these; and its well
for her she didn't have; for the breech-
es came rery nigh being the death Of
her. Old Long said If the COW died
he'd sue Jerry and make him pay for
her; but she got we'll; 80 did Jerry
But it was o long time before Jerry
could "set up" though he was able
to stroll round. and for many days af-
ter this mishap he has been seen
walking about, his hands crJssed be-
hind him under his coat-tail. sing
ing: .-t...
'ffIs that woos asd russ away
viii live to WOO another day;
Rut be that 10 ip sourt,hip :iais
VIII never live 10 court again"
Then his mind wanders away into
the future. he pictures to himself n
life Of future bliss, "a cottage and n
creeping vine" ETC., for he feels that
he can wait, he feels that old Long
will soon die. and the thought is balm
to his wounded honor. and then he
murmers: .ft
Were Long 70 die I wouidat cry.
But make gay ding dong Il "a;
for am sh.rt aud be 10 Lag,
Asd thHt's the LYsg AID Short Of IT,"
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16
FAMILY sECwErs.

In Freedom, now Alliance, STARK
county, Ohio, in 1843, there lived O man
nained Dodson and his wife, who wer,
both frm believers in tho prophecy ol
Father Miller; aud not doubling for 4
womsDt the correctness Of their proph
cts calculations, they set about mskipg
sctive preparations for the sventful dsy
that was to terminate the existence of al
sublunary things. 7aA tssa
After having set the house 10 order.
the following conversation took place:
Husband-My dear wife, l believe
have made every preparation for to.mor.
row. ! have forgiven all my enemies
and prayed for the forgiveness of my sin.
and | feel perfectly calm and resigned
Wife-Well, husband, | believe I am
ready for the sound Of the trumpet.
Husband-I'm rejoiced TO hear it
But, MY dear, 1 have no doubt there are
many little domestic secrets which have
been kept hidden from each other, which,
had they been told at the time Of their oc.
currence might have produced unpleasant
feelings, bu. as We have but one day more
10 live, let us unbosom ourselves freely
TO each other. e{.4 ~
Wife-WelI, husband, you are right,
there are some iittie things that never
told you, and which I intended should
remain between me aud my God; but ss
we have but one hay left reckon it's
right to make clean breast TO each 9TH
or. am ready-you begin, husband.
Husband-No dear, you begin.
Wifs-No, husband, you begin. !
cannot. -
Husbsnd--No; you know, my love,
Paul says husbands have the right to
command their wives. II il your duty
ss christian woman TO obey your hus.
band. and the father Of your children.--
So begin, love.
Wife.-In the sight Of God, it's right
so, will tell you. dear husband. our eld-
est son. Will.m. il not your child.
Husband-Great God Mary, ! Dev-
er dreamed Of you being untrue TO me =
Is that so?
Wife-(in tcars)-Yes, God forgive me
IL is true. ! kaow that / did wrong. but
am sorry for it: but 10 an evil hour
fell and ihcre is no help for it now.
Husband-WiIliam not mine 10 the
name Of God, rhnse child is lief
Wife-He's Mr.. Graham's, the lame
butcher. ~
Husband-So William amt my child
Go on.
Wife-Wcli, our daughter Mary. nam.
ed after me, art your's neither
Husband-!Saisafion! Talk ON Mary
come right out. Who is Mary's faith
er?
wife-Mr. Grider, the maa that built
the meetin' house and went to Kentucky. y.
Husband-fresignedly)-Weii as there
is but one day more, III bear it, SO go on,
II you have anything else.
Tife-Wcll, there's our youngest
Husbaud-I suppose Jenny, air.
mine 80
Wife-No. dear husband, Jenny, tha,
zoe both love 80 we'll. ain't yours neither
Hu.band-Aeyeifal Lord! Is tha.
so! In the name of the Savior uAo's 4.
he?
wife-Smith's, the one eyed saoemak-
eY that lives at the forks Of the roads.
Husband-WelI, by heaven, Gabriel
n l. 4
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16
VARIETIES.

Tide pretsiest girls in Utah generally
marry Young. .
Tho weak minded men greatly cut num-
Der the strong minded women in most COM
munities. -. s.s-~s he..s.
When Adam aud Eve partook Of tho,
tree Of knowledge, did they study the
higher branches?
A Rhode Island mother has saved mou-
ey enough by washing to buy her styiish
daughter piano. 49
The contractors Of Chicago make the
money dy. Tho wings ofths court house
cost S725, 900.
1t is often pretty good matrimonial
firm that consists of three-qaarters wife
and oue-quarter husband.
Thirty counties in Iowa voted at the
late election in favor of prohibiting by law
the sale of wine aud beer.
Mr. Shafer, of Connecticut has commit
ed suicide on account Of an unfortunate
resemblance to Gen. Butler.
Miss Lotta Farmham, of Laug.auee
county. Wis, has just planted her sixth
husband. Next.
Miss Ida Wolf was married last We'd.
nesday, to Mr.. Angel, the frst instance
of Wolf becoming an Angel.
Diggory says he respects old age, ex-
| cept when some one cheats him with .
pair Of tough chickens.
Blank forms Of proposals are used BY
Minnesota ladies when their young men
are slow iu coming to the point.
Susan B. Anthony's ailment turns out
to be, not disorder Of the windpipe, but
a disarrangement Of the .fungiform papil-
lac.
Edward Cary, New York base ballist.
has exchanged an eye for more intimate
knowledge Of the noble and national
gamc. @ s7ft a E A.1S'H
It is as nearly impossible TO get mon
ey out Of miser as it would be for .
butcher to get lamb chops out Of . batter
Iing-ram.
The Ladies Missionary Association Of
Hartford. Conn, havo mission in Mex
leo which numbers eight churches, and
500 Mexican converts. Q zsa
Il
An exchange says: "The compositors
| in San Francisco embrace many ladies."
The composisors in San Francisco ought
to be ashamed Of themselves.
Tho husband crop at Long Branch is
said to have been failure this, season
The few that were harvested, however,
are expected to show large yield. .ao-
The London Globe believes that if . vote
could be taken by the wives Of England on
the subject of Iegalising Marriage with .
deceased wife's sister; the result wouidibe
largely sgainstiit. ~ 81 aiIs I'd
A Massachusetts, widow was recently
called upon BY the ariatocratic relativesof
her deceased husband. who modestly ask,
ed her when she went out washing to
lgivs false name, 50 Is not to disgraoe
she family. She told them to 60 tc-~-.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16
THE PREsIDENTIAL LOOK.

If the Democrats wish to understand
their chances for electing the next
President, let them carefully consul.
the following figures. There are 3l7
members of the Electoral College, as
at present constituted; necessary to q
choice, s159. At the last elections
held in the following named States
the Democrats obtained majorities on
the popular vote in each State: 9't
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

FACTS roR woRKIsoxES TO coSsrprn.

|
Why is it that the laboring man,
who has constant employment. finds
that his wages barely feed and clothe
his family? The compensation il as
great as he received before the war,
probably greater, yet. Ito use home
ly but expressive phrase), it all that
he cnn do to 'make both ends meet. u
The reason for this can be fouEd
nowhere else than in the odious and
unjust laws of tho present Radical
Congress!
There has been too much Legislation.
There are too many laws protect.
ing the rich manufacturer ut the ex-
|pense of the laboring man.
1t is fact that while Congress- has
been enacting laws TO break the fetters
of the black man, it has also enacted
laws in the interest of the manufactur.
ing nabobs of the country, that have
anslaved the white man. Under the
pretence Of protecting home indus
try" it has placed yoke upon the
necks of thirty millions of white men
the result of which is to make the
poor poorer and the rich richer.
It will not be disputed that clothing
coal, iron and salt, aud many other
things which every working man needs
TO use or labor with, are to him, abso.
lutte necessities, more necessary, in
fact, than sugar. tea or coffee ,Ol
course the cheaper he can obtain
these neccssaries the better. Yet We
have the amazing fact staring us in
the face, that Congress has made laws
for the especial purpose Of making the
price of these things higher. This
has been done because the manufactu
rers of this country do not choose to
supply the market as cheaply as it car
be supplied from other countries.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

Nineteen States, all of which at the
last elections held therein, gave Dem
ocratic majorities. One hundred and
seventy-seven electoral votes-or l8
more than are necessary to choice
There will doubtless be o new appor-
tionment of Congress and Electors,
but that can not effect the result. It
will thus be seen that oil the Demo
Gratis have to do in order to secure the
election of the next President is to re-
tain their present popular strength.
They can do this by maintaining har-
mony in the ranks and remaining true
to the conservative and patriotic prin-
ciples of their party Sacramento Re
4,Oz.ke,s as 80 4isi-
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

Mrs. Bollcs has Knocked one objection
entirely out of sight by tho statement
that an invention has been perfected in
Boston BY which the cradle can be salts
factorily, securely and continuously rocked
while the women, 60 to vote.
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

A number Of ladies in Jersey city have
formed themselves into an association .sf6i
the dissemination of better knowledge
of the human sysicm and laws of life. p
They. propose also to secure a harder
motherhood and less feebly developed pos
terity. ssIea 5tsq S. S s5ss s
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16

| RATES or ADvER rG : rsR rnAs:oA
Column, 500 Half Colt IN, $50 Qusstss Col
Column. $ss.
Irsnsisnt Advertisements per Square Of Ten
ines or less Of this sized type, frst insertion -
each subsesuent Insertion, 81. assss tx
square Is one inch in space down the coluns,
counting cuts, display lines, blanks, &cyas solid
inatter. No advertisement to Be considered less.
than square, and all fractions counted . faA
square. All advertisements inserted for . lss,
period than three months to be regarded - traa.'
sisnf. ~ az - ~ - tftsg#zsef fi 9fTA<;
The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16
HISTORY OF A coUaTlHe SPELL.

Allmight have passed off rs quietly as
the fog of summer morning had it
not been for to, much hugging and
kissing. Jerry was profoundly con-
vinced that:
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
Great Mems Wives.

In one Of the towns of Michigan re-
sided legal gentleman of fine abili-
ties, an eloquent talker, thorough
lawyer, and good fellow generally;
but he tippleth too frequently, and this
habit has retarded his advancement.
His party had frequently promised him
position, but the poor mans failing has
as frequently rendered it inexpedient
just at that time. Finally the time
came when the Congressional nomina-
ton was within his grasp. He had q
wife. She, too, wished to 60 to Wash.
ington. Other representatives took
their spouses to the capital. She men.
toned that fact to Robert
"You expect tolgo, dear, don't your"
eyes"
"And do as other Congressman dor
eyes" grutHy.
"Well, as other Congressman take
their wives, you'llItake mef'
81 don't care; you may 60"
"But, dear, you know I've never
been there, nor never been out much.
How do you think I'll appear among
other great mems wives?'
"'Pear well enough pear we'll
enoughl" replied Robert, beginning to
get little riled. "All great men have
confounded fools for wives"
Unfortunately for Robert, the people
did not see in Robert the representa-
tive the exigencies of the time demand
ed, and elected the other man. But
what I'll atrocious sentiment Robert
uttered
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
None Of Your Business.

Two young ladies, very gracefully
dressed, were lately riding in bus.
One of them, whose features were moro
remarkable for an excessive promi-
nence of nose then anything else, ex-
bibited to the othc likeness of her.
self, which she said had just been TAX
en-, and they we're engaged in discuss.
ing its merits when an elderly lady got
into the bus. She was evidently one Of
those inquisitive yet good natured souls
who take n deal of innocent liberty in
the world without thinking any harm.
Alte. riding a short distance, she held
out her hand and said to the lady with
the picture.
"Please let me look at il"
Her modest request was met with an
indignant frown, aud the reply, as the
case was returned to the lsdy's pocket:
"It's none of your business"
The old lay settled in her seat very
conplacently, when the companion of
the one with the picture, asked:
"What do you wish to do with itH"
"Oh, nothing" replied the old lady;
al only wanted to see how successfully
the artist has put such a nose on so
small plate"s d.
The lady with likeness covered her
face with her veil, and dropped the
subject during the remainder of the
drive
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
A Polite Elephant.

A young Burman Lord had married
a second time. On the morrow of the
wedding day in the morning, the new
bride surrounded by swarm of fol-
lowers. wished to take the air under
the verandah, kind of covered gall
lery which reaches around the dwell.
lings of persons of rank. The favor
ite elephant of the master-that
which the young lord usually rode -
was walking at this instant, under the
care Of the keeper, in a palisaded en-
closure, in the centre Of which the
habitation was situated. Having no.
ticed the presence of women, what did
the creature do? He approached the
verandah, leant delicately against a
barrier of bamboos which enclosed a
pleasure garden, picked the most deli
cate flower with the finger of his
trunk, then shook his ears, gave an
expressive cry, and showed significant
attention in his gentle eyes, after
which, raising his head and trunk
gracefully, he lifted the flower to the
level of the balustrade. Que of the
women stretched out her hand; the
elephant drew bac,, his trunk. The
sarna n,ovemant hain0 raDe,yad sa,.ar-
al times, the master then wished to
take the flower the elephant did not
draw back his trunk, but he did not
let the flower 60, Upon this the
queen OF the iete advanced her hand
tremblingly, and the extompore cour-
tier then gave her his offering gallant
ly. Jadgs If he Vers not careVsed
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
How We Get the War News.


The press dispatches from Europe
to New York during the last four
weeks numbered 100000 words. New
York has been better posted on the
issue of the war each day, than Lon
don, Paris or Berlin. These dispatch
es have almost wholly been sent by a
single cable, full one-third of the
whole to a single daily paper, and
with marvellous rapidity and
accuracy. Familiar as we are with
the work of the telegraph, its has been
marvel to us. To hundreds of thou
sands of minds, the whole process is
and has been deep enigma. Here is
man sitting in a dark room at
Hearts Content. The ocean cable ter
inmates here. A fine wire attached
thereto is made to surround two small
cores of soft iron. AS the electric wave,
produced by few pieces of copper
and zinc at Valentia, passed through
the wire, these cores became magnetic
enough to move the slightest object.
A. looking glass, half an inch in diam
eter, is fixed on bar of iron one-tenth
Of an inch square and half an inch
long. On this tiny glass lamp is
made to glare so that its light is re-
fected on n tablet on the wall. The
language of the cable is denoted by
the shifting Of this reflected light from
side to sidc.-Letter by letter is thus
expressed in this fitting idoim in ut
ter silence on the wall. There is no
record made by the machine except as
the patient watcher calls out to a COM
rade the translated flashes rs they come,
and which he records. 1t seems like
a miracle of patience. There is some
thing of awe ereeps over US we see the
evidence of q human touch 5000 miles
away swaying that tide Of light.
BY such a delicate process as this,
and after being repeated from line to
line five times before its ultimate copy
is in New York, have the late great
battles been recorded in daily papers
with great particularly, and sent
throughout the Union. Nothing like
it has ever before been accomplished.
The enterprise of the New York Press
has eclipsed that of wealthiest and
ablest presses in Europe. 1t is charac-
teristic Of the nation to do its work
frankly and well.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
"The Ruling Passion Strong in
Death"

The New York Star,. in an article
on betting, relates the following:
A distinguished physician was call
ed to attend an inveterate better, who
was attacked with a sudden and dam
gerous illness. After a careful dag
nosis, the doctor assured him that his
his condition was extremely critical,
and his Of recovery very doubtful.
Thereat the patient rallied somewhat,
aud the following colloquy ensued:
"I'll bet you hundred dollars, doc
tor, that l don't die.
"My dear sir, you may not, but l
think it proper to advise you that, in
my opinion, you will"
"Well, doctor, if die will l, go to
heaven ?"
81 hope so, SIR"
"Will l be an angel?'
eyes, sir"
"Will l have wings?"
II presume 30, sir"
"Well, now, doctor, when you die
will you go to heaven and be an an
gel?"
81 trust so, sir"
"And will you have wings2"
"Yes, suppose will"
swell, then, doctor, I'll bet you a
hundred dollars that I'll outhy you"
The man died; but the doctor, who
has not taken the bet yet, is still liv-
ing. If, as some theroists hold, we
take with us into the next world the
same propensities we have in this, We
have no doubt that all the betting
young Americans,and old ones, too, who
read this, will, in due time, be running
round making bets on the flying match
of our deceased sport, whose ruling
possion was strong in death.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
Rates of Advertising.

from that time 81 can guarantee
the fact" said the narrator, because
was there at the time" The person
in question was Portuguese, the old
est son Of Camaratta, ex-cook, conf
DENTAL steward and iactotum of the
Burman emperor, and dictator of tho
custom house of the empire. The
son himself was chief of the custom
house at Mandalay.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
How it Feels to be Shot in Battle
Experiences of q Soldier.

"There! blow in the breast, tear
ing in the body, n fall with loud cry
and terrible pain there l lay, one of
the victims Of the bloody day. My
first sensation was anger at the blow,
my second an expectation ofseeing my
self explode, for judging by the sound
of the ball | believed l had a grenade
in-my body; then came the pain, and
with it helplessness and falling Oh,
how frightiul are those first moments
Where was hit ? how was | wounded {?
could not stir, saw the battalion dis.
appear from sight, and myself alone on
the ground amid the fearful howling
and whistling of balls, which were in
| bcessantly striking the earth around me.
With difficulty l could turn my head
little, and saw behind me two soldiers
attending on third, who was lying on
the ground.
"Of what happened 1 can give no
account, except that l called for help
several times as we'll as I could, for the
pain and burning thirst had the upper
hand. At last both of them ran up to
me, and with joy | recognized the doc.
tor and hospital attendant of my COM
pany, Where are you wounded?' is
the FIRST question. l could only point.
My dress was quickly opened, and in
the middle Of the breast bloody
wound was found, which the doctor
hastily bound. The balls still con-
stantly whizzed round us one struck
the doctors helmet, and Immediately
| felt violent blow in the left arm.
"Another wound! With difficulty
was turned round, to look for the out
let of the bullet, but it was still in the
body, near the spine. AT last it was
cut out. IS the wounddangerousY !
asked. 4 hope not Pray tell me the
truth. Not rery dangerous, it is to be
hoped and as he emphasized very my
hopes melted They were going away.
The wound in the arm, doctor This,
fortunately, was looked for in vain the
ball had merely caused blue spot and
had sunk into the ground harmlessly.
I extended my hand to the doctor aud
thanked him, as also the attendants,
whom commissioned to send word to
my family.
"Carelessly it whizTed and howled
around me. The doctor had carefully
laid me on my cloak, with my helmet
firmly on my on my head, in order, in
some measure, to protect me from the
leaden hail. Thus lay alone with
my own thoughts, amid the most ter
rible fire, perhaps for an hour and a
half All my thoughts, as far as pain
and increasing weakness allowed, were
fixed on my family. Gradually got
accustomed to the danger which sur.
rounded me, and only when too much
sand from the striking bullets was
thrown on my body did | remember
my little enviable position. +
At last, after long, long waiting, the
sanitary detachment came to me. p
North German Gazette.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
A Juvenile Sharper.

A few days ago well-dressed lad,
of pleasing address, and bearing sur
face indications, at least, of honesty,
went to the residences of many Of our
prominent citizens, and in9uiring in
varibly for the lady of the house, in a
susceptible manner would tell how a
number of young men had earnestly
resolved on reforming-hsd forsaksn
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08

"A genial rector of a village par
ish in Minnesota found it difficult to
get his salary promptly, Lately it was
much behind. Going to one Of his de-
linquent parishioners in the hardware
trade, he looked over his stock of cork
screws rsry iastidiously, seeking a largo
one of peculiar strength and size. To
the inquiry, "What do yoa want ofsueh
= thing, any how p the answer came,
"My dear sir, want a cork-screw thar
can draw my salary!"
The payments are now coming more
promptly.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08

A peddler walked into New York
brokers' office and offered pens for sale.
you've come to steal coat, and
not to sell pens" said the broker, as
he thrust him out.
The following Saturday the peddler
appered in all the glories of his Sab
bath clothes.
"Now, sir" he asked with an air Of
triumph, edo l look as though l came
TO steal a coat"
No." replied the broker, "you look
as though you'd stolen one"
The peddler didn't wait.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1870-11-08
Tunt Sons & Co.'s

NEW ENGINES. Theundorsigned have
= for sale and. will receive orders for the
shove Engine. Messrs. TiiIt Sons IL Co.
are now sending TO this market their T.
Horse Power Engine with li-lIorse Power
Boiler peculiarly adapted to deep wells.
OFFICES at duncan & Challant's, dealers
In Well Fixtures, Hardware, &c, Main St.
next door to Chase House, Pleasantville,
and ut Mansion House, Titusville.
II. X. BRETT & son, Agents.