The Conservative. (M'connelsville, Ohio) 1866-1871, 1870-10-14
ABSENCE OF MIND.
An Unconscious seotchman-LudI-
CT Us Search for n Horse-Blunder
o. - sClergyman-SIr Isaac Newton
as tbs Dfnner-Other Queer Incl
From the Troy Times.l

CO gs search for a Horse-BIunders
o. NCiergyman-Sir Isaac Newton
dssseI.'
From the Troy Times.l
~ -anley remarks that absent-minded-
pes- the mark ofeither genius or fool.
We sing that Lord Macauley was little
too svere on one of its sides. A mans
mind may be so intensely occupied. with
lefty intuitions and inspirations that his
senses, seemingly, are scarcely awake to
the realities of this tangible world.
A certain Scottish professor was not more
remarkable for his writing on political
economy than for his frequent unconsci-
ousness of what passed before him. His
absence OF mind was so remarkable that
his wife once wagered that she would
acecst him in the street, inquire after
the health of herself and family,
md that he would not recognize her. She
actIs9lly won the wager. The professor
was once taking a solitary walk on the
banks of q canal, into which, in his alb
straction, he walked. When within u yard
of the center, an honest woman washing
clothes behind him bawled out, "Oome
oot, come DOT, fule body, or yell be
droont." These warning sounds invading
the tympanum of his professional ear, had
the effect of making him turn right about,
and forthwith recover the dry land. The
good woman, concluding him to be an
idiot, sympathetically exclaimed: 'Puir
body, atweel they hae muckle to answer for
that lets ye gang yer lane"
A friend tells the following amusing in
stance of absence of mind: Ny grandfath-
or was returning home one evening from
the bayfield,, driving his oxen before a
load of hay. He had tied an old mare,
which he had been using, to the cart be-
hind; but happening to think of one of
her favorite tricks OF pulling. he united
her again, and mounting, rode astride, still
driving the oxen. He fell into a deep
revery, as was his wont, in which balky
mares and all other vexatious sublunary
matters were banished from his mind. But
this serene state was suddenly broken up
by his happening to think, when near
home, that he had, when starting from the
field, tied that unruly beast to the cart
behind. Entirely forgetting the pre-
caution he had afterwards Ia
ken, he whirled about only to dis
cover that she was missing from
the place; and, sHpposing that she had
pulled loose, he rode back at full gallop in
search of the vixen. In the course of half
q mile he met one of his neighbors, slut
tering fellow, to whom he called out to
know if he had seen anything of her
Before the man had half surmounted his
tits (perhaps from comical expression
on his face the whole truth flashed into
my grsrdlather's mind, and he turned back
at full speed, without waiting for reply to
his inquiry, only exclaiming, "Let her go;
I'll not look her up" But it was too late
for him to save himself, and his neighbors
in the old Vermont village never suffered
the story to be forgotten as long as he lived
there.
We knew of a young fellow employed in
a store ON River street, who was one day
sent into the cellar to draw a gallon of
sperm oil. Will waiting, he snstcEed up
a piece of chalk, and in a minute was
absorbed in sketching the proprietor's pro-
file. The profile on the hogshead was
capital, but while the yeung artist was
absorbed in its pursuit, the oil pursued its
way over the cellar floor He was informed
he would not do for merchant. but Just
now he is first-rate New York artist
The following stories are told of the
sbsent-mindedness of a clergyman of the
church of Scotland: He married rather
late in life, and the marriage tour was on
the continent. At one OF the halting-
places, Mrs retired to the hymenial
bower in advance of her lord, who sat for
a time cogitating down stairs. Presently
he came to himself, and summoning the
waiter, requested to be shown to his bed
room. He was of course shown to the
room to which his wife had already retired.
But he had forgot all about matrimony and
what it involved, and recoiling from
the doorway with horror, turned
upon the waiter with angry up
braiding for showing him to a bedroom
already occupied by a womanl One Sun
day morning he was dressing in his bed
room on a chair in which lay tray con-
tanning half dozen shirts, starched with
fitting clerical stiffness. lie progressed
leisnrely in his dressing till he came TO at
tempt fastening his wsistcoat, when he
found that operation impossible. After
many Intellectual struggles, he called his
wife to his aid, who likewise found the
waistcoat difficulty insurmountable, She
was at a loss to explain The phenomenon,
till she happened to cast her eye on the
shirt tray. 1t was empty. The minister,
in his absence of mind, had put on the
whole half-dozen shirts, one on top of ano-
ther, and it was no wonder that his waist
coat would not button. On another occa-
sion he and his wife were under invitation
to dine at the mansion of the laird of the
parish. The minister had been out for q
long DAYS work, and when he came home,
little late. he found his mistress already
dressed and waiting. He at once went up
stairs to make his toilette, with strict in
functions from his good lady to be quick.
He was so slow, ,however, that she got impa.
tent and went to gee what was the cause OF
the delay. Entering the bedroom she found
the worthy man placidly enjoying his first
sleep. Having undressed, it seems that in
ais absence of mind he had taken it fol
granted that The natural sequel was to GO
to bed, and he lay totally oblivious of the
dinner-party at the lsirds.
1t is said OF Sir Isaac Newton that he of.
ten forgot to eat his dinner, which his
housekeeper was accustomed to leave in a
closet near his study door. His head was
too much in the Heavens, to mind the
earth; so friend, knowing his peculiarity,
one day slipped his dinner out of the bas-
ket and ate it up. When at last the phllo-
sopher came out and greeted his friend, he
asked to be excused, till he took his lunch.
On looking into the basket and finding il
gone, AC olAp4y CASAdAH1cu, huOh " LIZ
| friends amusement. ''Oh, l forgot, l ha6
eaten nay dinner r.
An absent-minded man, Mr.. A--, o
Troy, receives letter; he knows the hand
writing-he wants TO read it in haste-it ii
already dsrk-he strikes a light, tears {
paper and lights lamp, but the letter L
gone-he has used it TO light the lamp.
There is late striking instance giyeI
of Pere Gratry, who has just been nomi
mated Director of the Academy o. Paris
One day, when going to the Sorbonne
where he lectured on theology, he imag
ined lie had forgotten his watch, and tool
it out of his pocket to see if he had tim
to go and fetch it
1t is said of Neander, the learned lee
turer, and ecclesiastical historian of Ger
many, that his sister had to watch hin
daily, to see that he did not start 70 tn
university with his night-cap on, or witt
his study-gown and slippers; and it was no
uncommon for him, when moving asid
from the jostling crowd in the street, {.
step into the gutter, where he walked OF
and on, seemingly unconscious where h
was stepping.
The following anecdote illustrates sever
al things, among others the presence
mind Of medical students. and the absenc
of ditto sometimes in cabmen: medlca
student, returning home late IN cab, rec