davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
HUMOROUS.
all Observation-Disclosures.

Pail creatures -Dairymaids
The woman question-Is lie rich
A water -spout-A temperance Grafton.
Steady work-Walking on the tight
rope.
If you cannot bite never show your
teeth.
High tied-A man swinging at the gal
lows.
The earliest tubular bridge-The bridge
of the nose.
The man who works with will-The
Probate Judge.
Lawyers should sleep well-It is i'm
material on which side they lie.
An old lady, who pretends to 'knOw
all about it, - says the only way to pre-
vent steamboat explosions is to make the
engineers ''bile their water on shore.
In her opinion, call the Dustin is done by
cOokin' the steam on board the boat"
The bachelors refrain-a-lass The
maiden's refrain-ah-menl Let them no
longer refrain.
A bachelor used the following modii-
cation of hackneyed phrase in cOngrat-
ulating a newly married friend: 81 wish
you much jaw"
The champion halter of a Western
city claims also TO be the universal
sympathizer, - because he has felt for every
one
Why is the happiest of the vowels
Because . is in the midst of bliss, is
in he'll, and all the others are in purga-
tory.
A woman recently entered a store in
Connecticut and set down in front of an
iron safe to warm. She remarked that
she ''never did like them kind of stoves
they didn't throw out any heat, those
gas-burners didn't"
A credulOus man said to a wag who
had a wooden leg GLOW came you to
have a wooden leg?" "Why," answered
the wag, "my father has one, and so had
my grandfather. 1t runs in the blood"
"Ah, Jenny" said a sympathizing
friend to a man who was too late for the
train, '|yOu did not run fast enough"
eyes did, said Jenny, ''but did not
start soon enough"
Good style of walking-when you get
into in editors room walk right out. 1t
is healthy exercise, particularly for the
editor.
elf you will quote any of my jokes
said Lamb, ''quote this, which is really a
good one: Hume and his wife and several
Of their children were with me. Hume
repeated the old saying, 'One fool makes
many :Ay, Mr.. Hume, said l, point
ing to the company, you have fine fam
ily.'"
Matrimony is-hot cakes, warm beds,
comfortable slippers, smoking coffee,
round arms, red lips, kind words, shirts
exulting in buttons, redeemed stockings,
boOtjacks, happiness, etc. Single blessed
ness is-sheet-irOn quilts, blue noses,
frosty rooms, ice in the pitcher, unre-
generated linen, heelless socks, coffee
sweetened with icicles, utta-percha
biscuits, rheumatism, corns, coughs, cold
dinners, COLES, rhubarb, and any amount
OF misery
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
.5udd's Bill.

The discussion over Judd's bill will be
gin soon after reassembling, and a large
number is already on tie Speakers slate
TO speak for or against the bill. Mr..
Hale, Of Maine, heads the list, and will make
his maiden effort in opposition to increas-
ing the number of the present Representa-
tiycs or making appointments in advance
of the completion of the census.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
B,yAND SALT YOUR OWN PORK

There are multitudes of families in our
cities and villages, and even among small
farmers, that buy of the butchers or
market-mcn more OF less pork every week
in the year. In connection with the use
of other meats, their purchases Ofthis ar
ticlc will amount TO perhaps fifty dollars
in the twelve months. Taking 1868 for
a sample, they will pay from Is to 25C
pound, getting for their fifty dollars not
far from $50 pounds of meat. Could
they have procured an equal number of
pounds for less sum of money? Is it
economy to buy from hand to mouth
when the circumstances of the family do
not render any other course impossible:
COMPARISON BETWEEN THE TWO.
Good farm-faitencd pork is selling this
December, in most of the Eastern mar
kcts, for fourteen cents a pound in the
hog. A well fed spring pig weighing
$50 pounds would cost, at this rate, S35.
If cut up by the butchers or market
men, it will be divided about as follows,
and sold (taking 1869 as the basis of our
calculation at the prices annexed
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
TIE roIa.IEs OF GREAT WIN,

Tycho Brahe, the astronomer, changed
color and his legs shook under him on
meeting a hare or a fox. DR.. johnson
would never enter a room with his left foot
foremost il, by mistake, it did get fore
most, he would step back and place his
right foot foremost. julius Caesar was al
most convulsed by the sound of thunder and
always wanted to get into cellar or under
ground to escape the noise. To Queen
Elizabeth the simple word death was full
of horrors. Even Talleyrand trembled and
changed color on hearing the word pro
nounced. Marshal SAKE, who met and
overthrow opposing armies, fled and
screamed IN terror at the sight of a cat.
Peter the Great could never be persuaded
to cross a bridge; though he tried to master
the terror he failed to do so; whenever he
set his foot on one, be would shrek out in
distress and agony. Byron would never
help any one to salt at the table, nor
would he be helped himself; if any Of the
article happened to be split on the table,
he would jump up and leave his meal I'M
finished.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
A BOYS BOOTS.
Irrono tf,o rInorsh ~ uo,,o

The boot period is the dividing line be-
tween babyhood and boyhood Before
the boots, one is tramped upon by com
rades, and stuck with pins, and we walk
with an air of apology for the fact that we
were born at all. Robust school-fellows
strike US across the cheek, and when we
turn to them, they cry, "Who are you
looking at 2" or what is worse than any
possible insult, have somebody chuck us
under the chin and call us ''bub." Before
the crisis of boots, the country boy carries
no handkerchief. This keeps him in a
case of constant humiliation. Whatever
crisis may come in the boys history-nO
handkerchief This is the very unpopular
period of snuWes.
But at last the age of boots dawn upon
a boy. Look out how you call him
club" He parts his hair on the side,
has the end of his white handkerchief
sticking out of the top of his side pocket
as if it were recently arranged so, has a
dignifed and manly mode of expectOra-
ton, and walks down the road with long
strides, as much as to say: ''Clear the
track for my boots !"
We have seen imposing men, but none
have so thoroughly impressed US as the
shoemaker, who, with waxy hand, deliv
cred into our possession our first pedal
adornments. As he put the awl through
the leather, and then inserted the two
bristles into the hole, and drew them
through it, and then, bending over the
lap-stone, grasped the threads with hard
grip, and brought them up with jerk
that made the shop shake, we said to our
self: ''Here is gracefulness for you and
power,"
It was Sabbath day when we broke
them in. Oh the rapture of that moment
when we lay hold of the straps at one
end, and, with our big brother pushing at
the other, the boot went on We fear
that we got but little advantage that day
from the services. All the pulpit admO-
milton about worldlincss and pride struck
the toe of our boots, and fell back. We
have trampled under our feet all good
cOunsels. We have to repent that, while
some trust in horses and some in chariOts,
we put too much stress upon leather
Though our purchase was so tight in the
instep that as sOOnas we got to the woods,
we went limping on our way-what boots
it? We felt that in such a cause il was
noble to suffer
For some reason, boots are not what
they used to be. You pay a big price,
and you might walk all day without hear
ing once from them; but the original pair
of which l tell spake out for themselves.
No one doubted whether you had been
to church after you had once walked Up
the aisle in company with such leather.
1t was the pure eloquence of calf-sllin.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

WEiARE NOW PREPARED TO Ex.
hibit stock Of Clothing and GsntJsnsn'sl
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

The members of the Fire Department
we're paid off promptly on Saturday, for
their services rendered during the month
of December Tho entire amount paid, in
Guiding the services of the members and
repairs to hose, engines, harness, etc, was
S.. 500. For the month of January this
amount will be reduced near $500, com
porting with the reduction made in the ex-
penses of the Department, by recent action
of the City Council. 1t is the intention Of
the present city administration 70 pay all
promises promptly and to pay in currency.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
Nmost rlY.Icrlous Trngcdy.

A terrible tragedy recalling in some OF
It's features, the famous Helen-Jewett
murder and invested in addition with
the shadows of dark mystery, occurred
AT no. 90 Elizabeth street last evening.
The house is one of designation, kept by
Ms. Beck. Among the visitors to, and
ucC, IantS of a back room every Sabbath
afternoon for the past five months, have
beer an unknown gentleman and a closely
veil, lady. Nothing was known Of the
parties 10y Mrs. Beck, except that the
mar engaged the room every previous
Saturday, and that the mysterious woman
whose face she had never seen, met
him II the usual time last evening at $3.50
o'cl.ck. Pistol shots heard in the cham
Der fNITs. Beck, and policeman hastily
Brou. in the door and found the man
lyin on the floor insCnsble with pistol
sho, IN the right temple, and his Compan-
ion. u handsome and apparently refined
and Intelligent lady, lying ncar him with
gLStly wound il the lett temple. The
love. were taken TO the Bellevue Hos.
pital where they died shortly after arriv-
ing and without speaking a word 20 Clcal
up The mystery.
Frm papers found in their pockets il
Is bc we'd the name of the man is George
Baum IN and the wOman's Annie MCNam.
are, md that they were both schooltcaCh,
crs Do Brookyn-castcm division. Tho
bod.. were placed in the Morgue fOl
identification. Great excitement prevailed
last i-ht in thc vicinity Of the tragedy
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
EGGS,

We find in a late English paper the
statement, which seems well-nigh mcredi-
bic, that in 1866 England imported nearly
431, 100000 of eggs! valued at fl, O97,
O97, or nearly So, 400, 900 They are
obtained chiefly from France, where
cgg-laying begins between January and
March, and ends in October, when the
hens are left to themselves. But artifi-
cial means are employed to get and keep
the important production; their quarters
are warmed, and the fowls are fed on
buckwhcat and meal. And it is remarked
that the districts which produce most
bucllwheat produce most eggs.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

| IAltiS, Jan. o.-h. Elnlle OllficJ ulll-
isterial combination, announced day or
two ago, is entirely broken up, but it is
now ascertained again that NM. Darua
and Buffet, of the left centre, and NM.
Talhouet & Segris, of the right centre, will
be called TO the Cabinet.
An AnecdOtc,
The Emperor on Saturday, i'll reply to
the usual address of the Corps Legislatif,
addressed himself to the President of that
body as follows: The assurances of de-
votion which you address to me in the
name of Corps Legislatif, render me
happy. Never was our good understand
ing more necessary than now, that cir
cumstances have augmented your pre-
negatives without diminishing the au-
thOrity given me by the nation. In shar-
ing the responsibility with the great bodies
of State, l feel more confident of over
coming the difficulties in the future.
When traveller has gone long journey
and lays aside portion of his burden, he
is not weakened but gains new strength
to continue his march.
To the Clergy.
Subsequently, in reply to an address of
the Archbishop of Paris, the Emp 5ror re
piled: accept with gratitude the good
wishes of the clergy of Paris, and receive
in return my felicitationsupon the zeal you
have shown, in promulgating among the
masses doctrines of abnegation and chart
ty,
The new ministry has at length been
al (ly3f.sy,V f,iVr no
list as follows:
Minister of Justice and Religion, Emile
Olivier; Minister of Foreign Affairs,
Count Napoleon Daru; Minister of the
Interior, Chevander De NaldrOme; Minis
ter of Finances, Louis Joseph Buffet
Minister of War, Gen. Edmund LIE Bouff;
Minister Marine, Regault DeGensuilly;
Minister of Public Instr elton, Emile
Alexis Scgris; Minister of Public Works,
Marquis DeTalhouet; Minister of Fine
Arts, NJ. Maurice Richard; Minister of
Emperor's Household, Count Vail, and
President of Council of State, Esquiren
DeParien.
An Imperial decree separates the Min
istry of Fine Arts from that Of the En-
peror's household.
NJ. DUOurger, Minister Of Justice IN
1875, has been appointed Senator.
Isabella and Due de MOntPcnsier.
The Emperor recently paid visit to
CX-Queen Isabella of Spain. She related
to him the proposals that had been made
TO her by the Duke of MOntpensier since
he had been in France, and said she had
refused to accede TO them solely TO
please him (thc Emperor
of Course.
The JouTR0l Oficid referring to the
ruinous satisfaction on part of the soldiers
pronounces the complaint an exaggeration
and a manifestation of i'll will, and asserts
that the public properly appreciates the
matter.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
THE CITY.
County GOnrI.

The regular quarterly meeting OF the
County Court was held yesterday, Judge
Glenn presiding.
The minutes Of the last meeting were
read and approved.
The roll was called and the following
Magistrates answered to their names:
John H. Baskette, W. d. Baker, Jere
miah Bowen, P. w. Brien, John G. Briley.
George Burch, John W. Bush, T. D. Cas-
setty, J. B. Garfield, James s. Campbell,
w. j. Chandler, z. H. Childress, jr., VIM
Curtis, Enoch Cunningham, E NJ Gull
lum, Sam. B. Davidson, Wesley Drake, B.
N. Dodd, NJ j. Dolin, Nat. F. DOrteh, ].
S. Dillahunty, Alfred Dunn, Jos. I. Ellis
ton. VIM. B. Ewing, Benajah Gray, Michael
Gray, d. S. Graves, Gilpin Hallum, James
Haynie, Hollis Hagar, Zach. t. Hays,
James NJ. Hinton, Henry Holt, 7. G.
Hardy, Ashley Kennedy, Martin Kerrigan,
VIM. A. Knight, d. S. Lapsley (colored),
Joseph Lea (colored), W. A. Mathews, P.
W. Maxey, Patrick McTigue, Henry
Mcneil, D. NJ. Neylan, d. A. Phelsn,
James T. Patterson, Isaac Paul, w. G.
Parrish, Ernst Pohl, Charles Rich, John
w. Fucker, George w. Spain, Horace G..
Scales, Thos T. Saunders, James H. Still,
James Sloan, John Taylor, II. Townes,
Pat. Walsh, N. B. Willis, James S. Viii
liams, w. H Wilkinson, ST., James Wyatt,
Nelson Walker (colored).
Judge Glenn stated that ID. Neylan had
produced his commission from Gov. Sen
ter, as magistrate In the first district, and
asked to be sworn into Office.
Esq. Maxey referred to several gentle
men who had moved out of their districts,
and moved that the seat of F. W. Horn be
declared vacant. Carried.
Esq. Baskette read decision of Su-
preme Court to show that commissions
issued by Military Governors were void.
The commission of d. n. Neylan was
read, and it was moved that he be qualified.
Mr.. n. being present, came forward, and
was sworn in as Magistrate.
Esq. Maxey moved that all rules be sus-
pended up to rule S, in order to proceed to
election. Carried.
Esq. Mathews moved that all elections
shall take place on Tuesday morning.
The previous motion was called and ESQ.
Maxey's motion was carried.
A motion to reconsider was put and lost.
The Court then proceeded to the election
of Assessors for the different districts
For the first district, the names of John
H. Currey, D. W. J. Sawrie, and A. S. Camp
were placed in nomination On the first
ballot the vote stood Currey IL; Sawrie 3 /;
Camp Is. Mr.. Currey having received
majority of the votes cast, was declared
elected
The following are the Assessors elect for
the different districts:
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
GLOVES

In AlCxandTc's kids a new shade has
been brought out for evening wear. 1t is
the most delicate of perIG, or rather pearl
color, and they are in both black and
white welts, and stitched in the color to
correspond This shade Is beautiful in
gaslight.
The long gloves, with six buttons, to
be worn with short sleeves, are in the
shades of straw color, buff, and other
light tints. In the medium shades they
are in three buttons.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
TWO POSTOFFICES.

Look ON this picture, and on this
The English postoffice, with net profit
last year of $23, 900, 900.
The American postoflice, last year, run
ming behind expenses over a million, and
showing deficit of nearly i've and half
millions.
The English postofiice without any
dead-head permitted in it, not even the
Sovereign, who must use postage stamps,
The American postoflice with nearly
80, 900 dead-heads; sending to and fro
shirts, boots, books, paregoric, plantation
bitters and Christmas gifts Washing
ton Correspondent Chicago Tribune.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
CUBA
An.Endignant Junta.

NEW YORK, Jan. 3-Don Miguel Albania,
President of the Cuba Junta in this city,
communicates the following: The Cuban
iuntaOf this city have read with thcutmost
Indignation the telegram forwarded to the
Associated lress from Havana under date
of yesterday, saying the cditorsof the Ha-
vana journals affirm that they have
seen a circular signed by members Of this
Junta, ordering the Cubans to lay down
iheir aims.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
ALBANY.
Ano.hcrlRaiIroad Captured.

ALBANY, n. Y, Jan. 3.-The Ramsey
Directors have taken possession Of the
Susquehanna Railroad under a decision of
Judge Icckham, that the stay of proceed
ings ordered by the New York Judge was
of no effect upon the validity of Judge
Smiths Judgment.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
JOHNsON'S IMPEACHMENT.

Money TO Buy SenatOrs--A Denial.
BALTIMORE, Jan. 3.-Col. Webster, late
collector of this port, publishes a card in
which he says: The intimation that | was a
party to the raising of money to buy Sen
ators, or for any other corrupt or improp-
er purpose, or that was aware of any
money to be used for such purposes, in
connection with Mr.. Johnson's trial, is
absolutely and entirely false.
To Pay Legal Counsel
He states the circumstances of the rails
ing of some 50, 500 in Baltimore, towards
the payment of Mr. Johnson's counsel
fees, which was paid to Edmund Cooper
in the presence of the Hon. Stevenson
Archer, and adds: If any Senator was
bribed to vote for Mr.. JohnsOn's acquittal,
which l do not believe, had no lot nor
part in that disgraCeful business, and was
ignorant of any purpose or attempt to
do So
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
XHnmtsfo Know.

PARIS, Jan. 3.-In view Of the many
conflicting stories as TO the position Of
Victor Emanuel in the matter of the can
didaturc Of the Duke of Genoa, il is re-
ported that Gen. Prim to-day telegraphcd
TO Florence, asking for decisive yes or
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
financial.
NEW YORK.
Broker Boutwell,.

INV NoEE, Jan. o.-Thc Assistant
Trcasqrer received instructions from the
Secretary of the Treasury to buy ST, 600,
900 of 5-2O's during the current month
and sell 1000, 600 in gold. The follow
inr is the programme of sales of gold
Jan. Is, 81, 900, 600 sinking fund; Jan. s
$LOOO,OOO special fund; Jan. %
$1,000, 600 sinking fund; Jan. 2G, $1,000,
OU0speCial fund. Purchases of bonds, Jan
5. $1,000, 600 special fund; Jan. =
$1,000, 600 sinking fund; Jan. 10, 1000
900 special fund; Jan. p, $1,000, 900
-sinL-inLr fnnl
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
ANOTHER OCEAN YACHT RACE.
4 Contest between Gho American
Yacht DauntIess and the English
Schooner CambTia--Thc vessels 90
start on the 18th OF July Next

There is to be another international
ocean Yacht race. It viii be between the
American schooner Dauntless owned by
Mr.. James Gordon Bennett, JT., and the
English schooner Cambria, owned by Mr..
Ashbury, of Brighton, England. The
following cable dispatches explain the
matter:
BHGHToN, Dec. Il, 18G9.-TO Mr..
Bennett New York l unreSeTvedly re
tire and waive the question OF the four
Channel or inland courses, and will race
dauntless from Cowes to New York,
any time in March or July, to suit your
convenience, for G25O service.
AsHBUEY.
New York, Dec. 10. - To Mr..
AshbuTy Brighton: VIII you OF will you
not sail the Dauniless in accordance with
my acceptance of your challenge of Sept.
| 81, starting point being Old Head of Kin
sale and not COwcs. July equally agree
able BENNETT.
BmGHToN, Dec. 25.-To Mr.. Bennett,
| New York: Have been absent; returned
last night. The Cambria will uncondi-
tionally race the Dauntlcss any time in
July. from Old Head of KinSale TO Sandy
Hook or New York, for $3.50 plate.
Nevertheless, / cannot admit your accept
ancc of challenge of Sept. q, seeing you
absolutely refused four out of the five
races and changed the course of the fifth.
The inconvenience and disadvantage of a
| start from the Irish coast, as compared
| with Cowes, l unrcservcdly agree to, tC
prevent the possibility of the race being
once more off. NOTeply necessary.
AsHRURY.
NEW York, Dec. q, l869.-To Mr..
Ashbury, Brighton: Your telegram sat.
isfactory and as you say any time in
July, name the 4th of July as the day OF
starting, if agreeable TO you. Other pre-
liminarics of course can be arranged upon
my arrival in England June next. Please
answer if this meets your approval.
BENNETT.
BR1GHTox, Dec. IS, 1SG9.-To Mr.
Bennett, New York: The unconditional
race, Cambria against Dauntless, for thu
18th OF July, is quite acceptable.
AsHBUEY.
4 little Sabbath School scholar said slit
couldn't help laughing TO think how
astonished Goliah must have been wheI
| = - l. lin, q
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
SPAIN.
INTERCHANGEABLE.

MADEID, Jan. There have been
several important conferences between
Gen. Prim and Senior Olosaga. II Is
rumored that ministerial changes are
likely to result thcrefrom in view of the
prolongation of the provisional govern
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

\ boy was caught stealing candy and
was locked up in a dark closet by gro
GER The boy commenced begging most
pathetically to be released, and, after us
ing all the persuasion that his young mind
could invent, he proposed: 'Now, If
You'll let me out and send for my father,
he'll pay you for the candy and lick me
besides" The grocer could not withstand
this appeal, and released the urchin.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
MISSISSIPPI.


MEMPHIS, Jan. 3.-An old man named
Burnside was murdered by bis son at Car
rollton, Miss, on Thursday The young
man was arrested. Cause, whisky
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04
PHILADELPHIA.
SChOcppC.

PHILADELPHIA, Jan. 5.-ln the Su-
premc Court the arguments in the DIR.
SchOeppc case were assigned for the first
Monday in February.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

An Ascending wife is thus pathetically
appealed to in personal column: ''Jane,
your absence will ruin all. Think of your
children, your parents, your husband.
Return, return; all may yet be well At
any rate, inclose the key Of the cupboard
where the Gin is.
Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1870-01-04

The story of city GARDINER who has
lived for years on one meal day, is dis
proved by the fact that every car-driver
makes bis brake fast a score Of times each
trip.