The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1870-04-01
Misfeaaurons.
THE CONDUCTORS STORY.

We were smoking one night befor'
the hotel smoking-room crate, when ont
man said:
II have always thought I'd like to be
railroad conductor-for little while q
least"
The old conductor smiled and knocke,
the ashes of his cigar.
"Well." said he, "I believe almost ev
ery-body has had that feeling at one tim'
or another. There is something fsscina
ting to sober business man in the he;
of doing busines, and earning your livin,
at 80 miles an hour, and the spice of dan
ger that you may at any moment be sen
to. o.kingdom come by lightning express,
is Just vague enough not to frighten, bu
attract. But to conductor it's q prosai'
business enough. So it is to engineer
and brakemen. Don't you remember
that, at the inquest over the Norwall
Bridge accident. 1t was shown that the
engineer was in the habit Of opening
everything and thenreading newspa
per? He was neglecting his business, O
course; but II shows what habit will do
twill make reading room Of an ex
press engine. .H
"Railroad men learn the lesson o.
punctuality very thoroughly. 1t won'
do to be late, or the train won't star
on time. and then an awful row is Ger
tain. One time I was at Albany, ant
that afternoon the Hudson River, Boston
and Central trains all started at 8 o'clock
Well. the conductors Of the trains, ant
the engineers, too, went down the river
on little propeller-tho Julia, think
she was called. We turned round In
plenty of time, but about ten miles be.
low Albany We ran aground. We were
in nice scrape. There wasn't CON
ductor at the depot to take any one.
place, and the tide was falling. vii.
liams, a splendid, great big fellow, got
desperate, jumped into the river. put his
shoulder under the stern, where the pro.
peller had caught on n mud bank. and
rs the boat was about Sinc cat power
only, and he was perfect Hercules, he
actually lifted her of, and we got tc
Albany just in time; only Williams had
to run to Syracuse with his wet clothes
on.
"It's q queer existence too, running
day after day through n lot of little
places that you don't take any interest in,
or know any thing about, more than that
the stations arc called such stations. II
isn't such . dangerous s,lifr, -cithsr. 40
cident insurance companies don't rate
passengers conductors very high, but il
you want to feel how helpless you are in
the hands of the Almighty, Just get on an
express engine, and get the engineer to
open everything on n dark night. 1t''
positively awful to SEQ your headlight
boring into the darkness, and to think
that between you and instant death
there's only the chance of two pieces o
iron you're travelling on being continuous
and clear; that If somebody had just
pried up rail since the last train went
over, or anchored something on the track
your friends won't know your body when
the coroner's jury calls them rs witnesses
to your identity. That's the way
thought the first time I tried it, but The
engineer was smokinga pipe, and the
fireman was whistlinS 'Jim-a-long Josie.
"Whcn conductor runs train out o.
town and runs another in again the same
day, it isn't such queer life rs when hi
runs train om one day and IN the next
Then he lives two lives. One night .
married man ut one place; tho next he's
bachelor at another place, and the mex
night married man again-and so on
see-saw.
There is q kind Of feeling Of RESPONSE
bility, having three Or four hundred lives
in your keeping. But, then. there's thu
rules. If you keep to them, If anything
happens, tisn't your fault. When yot
arc out of time and have to wait, YOU'RE
sure to be cross, and sure to badSercd b.
questions. A foreigner once told me tha
one of the most surprising things he't
seen in America was tho respect paid Il
conductors, and the way they were obey
cd by passengers. But passengers viii
, ask questions when you are waiting, and
it's provoking- One day was out o
time, and ran on on u switch TO wait fol
either the down train or telegram tc
come on. by and by, pompous ,nar
comes to me rs was sitting on tho fence
'Mr. Conductor" says he, '"what arr
we waiting for3"
"For the down train-we're out o.
time. There's q single track here. ant
she has the right of way"
.But suppose the down train is behind
too?"
"Then I'll get telegram"
'But suppose they don't telegraph you
how long will you waltz"
"7YR The checisrns or" said i.
He went back to the coach, growing
something about having an engagement
in town Mt the hour the train was due, ,ant
1 afterwards found out that he was tht
vicc-Prcsidcnt Of the road. But no wa
a sensible fellow, though quick tempered
and stood better with the officers fol
what / had said. Ho used to poke heavy
fun at me sometimes, and recommend m,
to wet the wheels and they would rust of
sooner.
"It's astonishing how reckless some