The union Democrat., 1870-07-02
YouNc noosTEEs:
rarDrsroslSc cArsrs or OLD sAlDlsx.

for shutting our girls out of masculine socie-
ty. These reasons lay in the existence oil
over our State, Of biped known as the
Young Rooster
The young Rooster'sl plumage is gau-
dy. Gaudy his neck-tie, sleek bis hair,
smooth his face, whiso his bosom (outside,
well cut bis pants. polished and well-ftting
his boots. Whatever intellect he has, runs
largely to hair-oil and boots. The earth may
wobblc unsteadily 10 its orbit, the spots on
the Sun increase until tbs Frigid monopoliz-
es all the other zones, war may break out
over the entire world aud the Young Roos-
ter'e mental equilibrium would still pre-
serve q beautiful balance. But let there
come the least DETECTION in the fit and symet-
try of his hest pair of fourteen dollar boots
and the Young Rooster is at once anxious,
perturbated distressed and disturbed.
The Young Rooster is smart. He can
whistle oil the common street airs. He whis-
ties well. lie occupies the chief seats at the
circus and the show. So he does at church.
His brood constitutes themselves line of
staring sentres at the church door when SER
vice is over. His opinion is always ready,
be the subject what it may. He knows a
great deal more how than he will Is years
hence. He requires about hours to dress
himself for evening parade. Ten years hence
he will dress himself in as many minutes.
The old parental hen and rooster regard
the Young Rooster with pride and admirs-
ton. They are careful that his trnnk is al
ways full of clean white shirts. The Young
Rooster deems that he has conferred favor
on the old fowls by coming into existance, as
well as in eating their bread, in sleeping at
their house and in wearing their linen.
The Young Rooster may be found any
where and everywhere, ct church, show, fes-
tival, horse-race, celebration or Sunday School
where there are girls. He encourages by his
presence all reformatory, all social, all edu-
cational, all devotional gatherings, providing
there's a girl or girls in the bill. He has q
poor opinion of any place without girls and
gives it little or no encouragement.
AL! this is merely harmless and amusing
But the Young Rooster |! is often dangerous
in that he crows too much. lie is apt to
boast Of conouests where none are made
Not openly perhaps but by winks and signs
and mods and words of uncertain and doubtful
import. These are caught np by other Young
Roosters )! and ere they have travelled far,
there is hatched out foul, filthy lie. concern
ing somebody's daughter; a lie with poisoned,
centipedal feet creeping from street to street
burning and singing as itpasses; lie crawl
ing its slimy length from shop to shop, and
wriggling into parlor, into Office, into saloon,
swallowed whole in draughts of mean whisky
and putfed out with the smoke of the cabbage
leaf cigars which the Young Rooster gets
sicks on and goes reeling to the parental roost
crying, Smother I've come home 10 puke!"
If fact should indeed be the foundation of
the Young Rooster's story, some one of his
own friends, his best and dearest friend, his
father or mother for instance, should engage
q double-barreled shotgun by the hour or the
day or the week and never lay it by until
they have blown off the sixteenth part of an
inch of the Young Rooster's head.
We will have no murder. For that does
really no one any good and gives the Young
Rooter no opportunity to reflect or reform.
lie should not "kiss and then tell"
But should the Young Roorster's! story be
mere lying boast or foul insinuation then
let not his best or dearest friend or his father
or bis mother or mis- man-servant or his maid
servant or any that be within his gates, let
them not let up on the double barrelled shot
gun, but let them charge it conscientiously
with power and shot or ball or bullet and TAX
ing deliberate and prayeful aim, let them
blow off the sixteenth part of the Young Roos-
ter head as heretofore advised.
We would have no murder yet. The shot,
the start, the fash and the sting would prob
ably momentarily double the Young Rooster
Up SO that he might deem the wind had
suddenly shifted, or the State again gene
Democratic. But the ultimatum might be
reflection and reformation.
i Yet, if still the Young Rooster persist
with or without cause in Growing conquests
over the girls, let there still be no let up on
the double-barreled shotgun, by the father
or mother, the man servant or maid servant
or the OK or the ass or any that be within the
gates, but let there be blown of the sixteenth
part of an inch Of the dear Young Rooster's
head at each repetition of his offence, until
there is nothing left to am at, savetho "mea,
next the horns."
i We would only with an aEectionate and
unselfsh regard for his moral training, kill
or cure the Young Rooster We would on
ly free our girls from the ravages of Young
Roosters II Wewoald only purify the youth,
full masculine element so that il be ft for our
daughters 10 breathe in. We deem such ele-
ment necessary for their cultivation and de.
velopment. Only it must be pure. 1t must
not be adulterated with bad Young Roos-
terslli For such purifcatiou, mainly were
double-barreled ehot-gans brought into the
world.