Delaware tribune. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1867-1877, 1870-08-11
AMONG THE LAKES OF MAINE

LAKE NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. GsQuOITAKooLooNATIc,
August 2, 1870.
What outrageous long names these Maine lakes
have, anyhow. 1t takes two men and boy
day and half to pronounce some of them, and
then they suffer week or two thereafter with
a disease something similar to the lock-jaw.
was compelled to leave Long Branch. The
hotel keepers became importunate in their de-
mands; exhibited no more tenderness for all the
finer feelings of fellows sensitive nature, than
if / had been common newspaper reporter.
Their conduct became uncomfortable, and gently
withdrew. Like the dusky Arab folded my
tooth brush and paper collars, and quietly sloped.
am now enjoying weeks Siesta, 30 to speak,
at the Koodyboozyslipklap House, on
Lake Munkatunkoobogsqu gsquoitakooloonatic. You
can Siest here a whole week for ten dollars and
twenty-five cents Nobody objects to the twenty
five cents, but there are some sordid, grumbling
persons who try to slew down" the ten dollars.
haven't learned that any of them have ever
succeeded. Your board bill here is presented
every two weeks. will probably get off cheap,
as remain but one week.
T aal,ad the proprietor OF the Koodyboozyslip-
kloptomania House why he didn't name his hotel
after Lake Munkatunkoobogsqu gsquoitakooloonatic.
He said he didn't like long names. Hotels, he
said, ought to have short simple names, so that
they could be easily remembered l think he is
right, too.
The tables are well supplied with all the deli
eacies of the season, such as frleu Dacon anu
bread, and apple pie, and broiled mackerel, and
such things especially such things. had near
ly forgotten tish-fish from Lake Chippitywhip-
| itylooskysnitz and some from Lake Pompywas-
sstunkamunkyschoodg, and from other lakes
with trivial names
| Almost any hour in the day you can SEQ per,
| sons here dancing around, first on one leg and
| then on the other like turkey on hot gi1ddle,
holding their faces in their hands. On inquiry,
you learn that these modern whirling Deyrishes
| have, in an ungarded moment, attempted to pro-
| nounce the name of the Lake at the head OF this
| letter Though they do say Lake Ytkiaouzm-
pukkugginbtsq has fractured more jaws than any
other in the State. experience no difficulty OF
| this kind. / have hired an able-bodied man,
| who has served fifteen years at the business, to
pronounce these confounded lakes for me. But
you ought to just see this mans ''mug.' You
would think Yankee Hyer or Tom Sullivan had
been punching at it for two days! His counte'
nance is fearfully awry:
lie schools in this vicinity the name OF one Lake
is chopped into pieces, and serves as spelling
lesson for class of fifty scholars. This neces
states the learning of about three words OF six
teen syllables by each pupil, when they '.coun
OFF, the class; but il the teacher "skps about.
then some of those scholars are pretty sure to bt
kept in at recess, or after school is dismissed,
| think it is very unright for teachers to skll
about when pupils count off and learn thel
| words
was going to remedy all this. 1t was not Liifitl
, Janf the anthor of Webb's Adder but SOM
chap who had been reading about that neat in
vention. He proposed to con, construct rue. & speinah
half, spell out the longest name of any lake Il
, the State. His motive was praiseworthy;, an
had he succeeded, he would have been bene
factor-if not Beniaminfactor- Ito his race.
But he failed -miserably failed.
i He built his machine, and large crowd cor
. pregated to witness its operations. At first
fried II on the name of small lake--or rather o
7 the small name of lake think it was LAX
Memphrogogwobbyski He commenced to tur
!, the handleSvery slowly at first. Immediatel
there was such groaning, swapping and inwar
rumblng of that machine that you would hay
thought il was going to fly to bits every minute
v But i didn't 1t spelled that lake correctly, an
!, the inventors face was covered with joy an
| perspiration.
n He next tried Lake Wissixquotiskpnoub
s Observation-Disclosures.
: The spectators gathered closer around, al
u watched intently. 1t was 30 quiet, you cou
have heard ten-pin drop.
d The man took hold of the crank again, al
yentured a turn. With great difficulty he move
il about an inch. Then he pulled off his Goa
!, rolled up his sleeves spat on his hands, ana
ID sayed another turn. His brows contracted, b
~ teeth gritted and
= '0SSI Whis-z-z! bang bang whiz! klop klol
r TRe air was thick with flying cog-wheels, m
hogony splinters dial plates, letters, screws al
AZ And that spelling machine was no more fe
I'd Two persons were killed on the spot and sc
10 eral wounded.
that inventor was about that time. He was si
rk ply tisgusted, and went away from there witho
nt saving f.goodbye to any one.
He is now a fiourishing outcast in the India
o' Legislature.
q- there are some old fogys who do-are led il
% o the village church yard, and have pointed out
0o them a fifty dollar headstone, bearing this
ao scription
er- "Here lie we, beneath the grass so green,
lid Killed by an Internal Spelling Machine"
1t is very touching, indeed.
al This morning started over to Lake Snot
ap booskinankimentykut to fish. Meetin
,ad lad on the road, inquired II he knew which Il
III. in the vicinity offered the best inducement
We anglers. ,,y ... ., l., ..,oa
the (which is the best lake to fish in ?"
hat .'O-h! Why think Lake Pissaquattisaq
quapassamoq quiddynixcum---."
l.. didn't wait for the boy to finish, but trud
by on. AT the expiration of three hours retra
irt, my steps, and there stood that identical lad
ITO the identical spot where had abruptly left i
~, muttering something to himself. AsIapproac
'i' he jerked out ;...,,,..,, ), ,...,
You may not credit it, but that boy, having |
flor his eyes on the ground had not noticed my del
ad ture, and had been fully three hours in get
,sss over the name of that lake heard the !
1rs. and fail of it, but evidently lost great bulk
Of tho middle.
The lads willingness to obligs completely
- my respect, and generously tossed him a {
jon, Telling him to LAY haIf Of itHp for o rainy
eha ffefniNAA n Observation-Disclosures JIG