The Sumter watchman. [volume] (Sumterville, S.C.) 1855-1881, 1870-01-26
9pife Box.

soldiers" as the drum said. n
"A COLONY is to be formed in M,
jersey by Toxas negroes.
Why are jokes like nuts? Beoaw
the dryer they are the better they crack
French physicians whiten red non
by electricity. Shocking! 4
A Chinese proverb says lie. has N
legs and can not stand, but it has vius |
and can Hy far and wide.
DO tho best you can where you u,
and when that is done you will fiud
opening for something better.
A dolls department has been op.a,
ed at Stewards dry goods store, whia
is quite as complete as that Of the ladia
in every respect.
-Texas is settling so rapidly tha
emigrants have to lie out doors uutl
huts can be built for their accommod,,
tion. Il
Lawyers must sleep more comfort
ably than people in general it il 4,
immaterial on which side they lie. 1
- Tombstones are but marks On Ii. \
road to show us where the mortal and
immortal parted company.
- A young man says that he cured
palpitation of the heart by the apple.
iod ofanother palpitating heart to the
part affected.
-"I can marry any girl I please"
said young fellow boastingly. "Verg
true replied his waggish companion
"for you can't please any.
Two sovcrcigns, out of situations
Of Spain and Francis the
Second Of Naples-are now residing 10
the same house in Rome.
Mrs. Winslow's soothing syrup
killed little girl at Newark, N. j., on
Saturday night. 1t is said to be sure
pop, if you give enough Of it.
-Forney's Philadelphia Press hasa
leading article headed ga thing Of
shame" It has no reference to Forney
himself. He is thing without shame,
says the Courier Journal.
Many fashionable young ladies IN
Now York are said to be suffering with
assesses on their feet, caused by the
high French boot heels now in vogue.
A "Big Indian" strayed away from
his camp and got lost. Inquiring the
way back, he was asked, "Indian lost 2"
"No," said he, disdainfully, "Indian not
lost-wigwam lost" Striking his
breast, lie exclaimed, "Indian here r.
-Gcncral G. T. Beauregard has in
vented machinery for propelling cars and
boats by overhead wire, or rope, deriving
motion from stationary engines, or 9TH
er power, at intervals along the route.
"A married lady lately consulted her
lawyer on the following questions,
Gas I welded Mr.. Smith for his
wealth, and that wealth is now spent, am
not, to all intents and purposes, a wi
dow, and at liberty to marry again 2"
Great excitement recently prevailed
in Wabash, Ind, over the enforcement
Of the Sunday law. Men, women and
were indicted for fishing, sew
ing and blacking boots on that day.
About 100 indictments were returned
into court against the best citizens of the
town, includin: several ladies.
-"Husband, I wish you would buy
NE some pretty feathers"
"Indecd my dear little wife, you look
better without them"
"Oh, no." said she, coaxingly 'you
always call me your little bird, and how
loes bird look without feathers 2"
- The Wilmington IN. C.) Star
says: "Thcre are at least two hundred
men in this community each of whom
ought to have daily newspaper 10
reflect his views. Until they are pro-
7ided with organs, We shall be glad to
publish their sentiments tat the usual
'ates.'"
"A series of sad events happened on
he steamer Ozark on her last trip down
he Mississippi. An old citizen OF Ar
kansas was found dead in his state.room;
NO colored men fell overheard while
wrestling, and were drowned, and deck
,and was blown to atoms by the explot
lion OF some torpedoes he was handling.
To tooot of UTho b,h:o.y GA