The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1870-02-06
WIT AND WISDOM.

Graded. N'"n' '"' '"oies al
r. fairs should young men shun m ost
Fair deceivers. '''
frlde goeth before a fall. 1T also poet
before waterfall
A class deserving of legislation con al
stract principles "-Pickpockets
When war closes, trouble ends; whe
armies close, trouble begins
u Is strange fact in our daily expert
ence mat When a man is taken in he i
\ sure to be "put out"
Cashiers who mainly devote themselve
70 de1alcatlons are not financiers in general
OUT only IN the abstract.
r. spnghtly little girl, on being asked
ev w nat amd is nothing" replied, "shut you,
MUS: Doc" being rather an awkward
degree, Fiddle D. D.n is recommended az
tne proper thing for musicians.
The man whose hair was restored wore
Wlg' which(was stolen. He got it on the
hrs1 application at the police station.
man who served four DAYS on a iurv
says ne is SO full of law that it is as mIci
as ne can do to keep from cheating some
one. 'o
:, One man, reprimanding another. said
IhaI ne talked like fool. "True,n was the
reply out 1T Is that you may understand
A paper says that man the morn;no
after he has been intoxicated feels as if Ie
mad the rheumatism in every hair of his
head. y. A''S
II young lady has thousand acres of
valuable land, the young men are apt to
conclude that there are sufficient grounds
Tor an attachment.
To Catch Mice.-On going to bed mt
crumbs OF cheese in your mouth, and lie
WIN IL open when mOuse's whiskers
tickle your lips, bite.
dignatiun as follows, He who steals ais nv my
purse steals trash, but he that stole nv
umOrella-cuss him"
-, "A young lady, being asked-bv a BORING
theolosian which party in the church She
was mos. in favor of, she replied that She
preferred wedding party.
People," says our sage ego according
TO their brains; if these lie in their head.
they study if in their belly. they eat T.
IN their heels, they dance"
A genius remarked the other day. with q
grave face, that, however prudent and yir-
tuous young widows might be, he had seen
many gay young widow-crr.
see a villain IN your face said a
w este1n Judge to an Irish prisoner. "Mav
1t please your worship" replied Pat, Chat
must he a personal reflection, sure"
i, AN Arizona ranger. who has just scalpcd
ms fifteenth Indian, writes to his folks in
the settlements, who inquired about the
weather, that there's good slayinr ont
here 30 '"' s
would-be wit asked his old uncle if
the tolling of bell did not put him in
mind OF his latter end. "No sir" he re-
pled, - but the rope puts me in mind Of
A vivid idea of the weakness of chicken -,
pup was conveyed in the wag's query to ,
bis wife at dinner. "Can't YOU coax that !
Fichtn to wade through this soup once t
bore o. !
A professional beggar boy, some ten h
A'ars of age, ignorant of the art of reading, G
8uGht card to be placed on his breast 4
ia appeared in the public streets as a y
poor widow with eight small children" c
A friend of ours says that he has been p
thout specie so long that his head aches :.
10 spilt when he tries to recollect how ~
liver dollar looks. He says the notion u
" We live i'll IL world of change is a u
at falacy." Il
p little Sunday school scholar said she a.
idn { help laughing to think how aston &
FL Golah must have been when the
pc from David's sling hit him, as She RI,
IT. bclieve "such thing eyer entered b.
Rlead before.' ~
Suicide is becoming very prevalent in liz
nifty" said New York gentleman to an pi
Ebltant of II ncighborng town. "Weu. va
~, SIR, don't know of any city where
sud prevail with greater advantage to Vi
the orld at large" pr
4 old cynic, at n concert the other wi
mig, read on the programme the title of a let
son viz: "Oh, give me IA cot in the valley sh
Z &c. Reading it attentively, the old pr
feilt growled out, "Well, if 1 had nv tn
cno'. should ask for bedstead." tn
Anntleman going into BARRIERS shop
10 p'haved, was very much annoyed by m li'
.he estions which were put and answered Ia
~ " barber with the greatest rapidity. Wv
=. would your honor like to be , ro
shaV y said the tonsor. "In silence, if 'r
pose" said the gentleman. en-,
otch minister, being much disco2- Ina,
sereeoy the putting up of umbrellas in a ish
;,onElation which he was addressing in for
, ,ne IN air on the sudden appearance of mo
,uMr: shower, shook his head grimly, and un,
"a, aa"SMl great solemnity, "Ah, ma freens, pro
Id, Id ms, there11 be nae umbrellas in tina
val
Elm judge, having been called on at ply
= ilnner for song, regretted that it pan
'a lW1 his power to crafty the com wit
jInS wag, who was present, observed acc
e ~ g much surprised by the refusal and
= 30 tne asned judge, as it was notorious 7
,n;oa Yrs had been transported by his ord
oice' of
W na the matter, my dear ?" said a gin,
-, t we her husband, who sat for half VINO ,
Nd 49, v his face buried in his hands, .hll