The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1850-1873, 1870-07-15

bublished tn the somewhat remote an,
certainly debilitated town of Jimtown
i As, I said before, L was not always thu
mot muchAfof my parents, although
poor, had some tolerably decent idea
of respectability. and designed thdi
son for abettet sphere In life whef'
his talents could at least @ be fairly dig
Far rarentkesss, the ambition of my
maternal and paternal pr0gemtors wf'
to see me Doctor, but had too holy
q horror OF Granddaughter to follow
that profession.
I received a pretty fair English edp.
cation. Eeafned TO read and write
(strange as it may seem when you 1e-
member my present yocatiop) a4f ap.
quired eno6gh OF arithmetic % figure
out what didn't, belong to me-, and
enough of geOgrnph ply to know. that the
'" United States made a splepdid trade
when they paucha6edl the fertile ice
bergs Of Alaska, together with an in
telligent population of polar beais,
walruses and seals. I'll
I'm an evil hour lhoweaer, I xAseh.
ticed to Jimtown, and once there, ]
speedily became too p6dr' IL get away.
After many halcyon days of hard labpl
consumed, in playing checkers, match
q ing nickels and shooting marbles with
the merchants and business men oI
Jimtown, who were certainly live and
progressive men when checkers, nick
els and marbles were concerned, 81 whs
induced to become controlling and
managing Editor of the afore-mentioh-
ed County papers IIwae TO, furnish the
brains "a Kind of capitalsvery scarce IN
Jimtown) and the Publisher was to
furnish me with exchanges, steel peris,
any amount Of free fights an opportt.
nifty or two to immortalize myself, and
all the specimens of radishes, sbeets
pumpkins and turnips that might be
sent Into the Office to be puffedo during
the wear. have faithfully performed
nv mart of the contract and 1 regret to
: saw tke sHuHGs&esll IFS lpsNormed his
-,sjsos,d hsye,svuaIiedr Z. Ths- Weekly
ltlHoEAaEaS1kSH Odd until a hive
barely enough 1T ta, keep me out Of
the lunetiG ksSxniH land in return II
hayeGbceiye three exchanges ZONE
offhem = jBu1nA ylexOted& exclusively
t6SaAhNsSdkEAeiv vV9fnsifBse,HA black
Aeye., -broEet: fIose.. -tiaree ,turhJps, one
sS6udgh. VI III iffsI AZ bbaafeil kound
vine made lufsWiIite N wire, e "a r very useful
invention},.0na -repssingn and four
dried. beets. dBesidss, I have bad my
clhSfaSt66f 2baFfdSte ted 9taffaf ie Vhas ds
marfy holes III dt ias IL ,taffltt0w net and
smyleafs ssn NOT sdistiuriIish sthjs jsnusic
6ana EoIiaAs harp ri = from fSom ! iiie dulcet
tones Of d fack s% 90, Saf,oooT = n9s ~
K e,sWritten.p,tffsi abo6 "our
clever frSopd 1iniisi save 7Ail ~" our
Bosom 6c6nurniouafownS hog ben,p
"our deyotd8 ana Srbane right-hand
3 i0xyer tPinSfsf,nfs rtuYnipi irHtcfSp p, tlbur
. estarnrisina ala pbiiiniid st3kited feIiew.-
citizens Slow & Co .lsl Il new % : hitohirig
i n .ssIH pet fes.ss NEW wife und oJphns6n's
: new new hal,Syl tSft1 hfditiot ca thesei mar
Velous OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES to- ;Otlrnadissc lit
sf1sfuYe. GGf8ye yWfitteafi1f6riSinEi ar-
-iirles about the IiutowfQ DfSatdyE So
ciafy and The ,fisfic n1anaapr5ss., 5 ,auiich
% n TTfatissSspI Ybak saYesa Hanletfrd ia
iiSIavf WfiehD III 0ollIf n d'dHif Pete
SIinksxdisnloNe6 .1aiax Godd.faeNTc 81 genius,
hreW1t 1l3S1ia Iferself INTO 81 TpaToxysfns bf
low Nv nIaving Hamlet I'm leans instead
of sahles and with ali the clothing
about his person. that he could spare,
crammed into tie Iegs of pair of COW
hide hoois - have also laufied to the
skies n concert given by the Young
ladies of JimtoWh,l the proceeds bf
which were to be devoted to the very
landahie and 'hiehIye commendabie
nnrnose of buying hcar-hound1 candy
fnrthe moor I:ftle lambs of fhe Baptit.
sunday I School who had kicked off the
1k;var,, and caught cold. or course I
done mn the concert in killing istyle.
Isnoke of the gorgeous voice of Miss
Mary Jane HIGGINS which filled the
sna;sstic aides Of the building There
wssn,f Inf one gfiIen N II And that WIS.
n had article Of THAR iIe,,l with volumes
of i,,arn,ohy + miss penelope White
ravished the audience v ith her musical
fatha,Ss % ray;sbing. the nockets of His
nre1l;tors ,r will, his nromfss6rv notes. lIof
INV that nora 'Iaf;nr and priai ser-
anh Miss Arabeila Simpkins opened
npr nnpn oa,,t,f,,I @ M ,i,ti, M was lise the
nntronea met ~ 70 The Mammoth CayeI and
en- = oca.n Of Of divine melody a,,shed forth
that M Ian came % verv near drowning the