Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1870-04-05
Tqx3ach f03. H1t171O7'iStS.

An editor of paper in Indiana wants to
know if modern whisky was ever seen comm
thro the rye?'
The Lydia Thompson-Storey cowhiding at
fair was alluded to by Southern editor In an
article called 'sThe Flax and the Elall. !"
The Farmers Clubs In Maine are discussing
the question, lis the retroactlon element mag
nifed by oleaginous nutriment?' We suppose
it is.
A New York medium, with view to indu-
cling editors to commit suicide, lmparts the IN
formation that newspapers flourish In the Eplrlt
world.
A Chicago husband complains that his wife
has thoroughly learned the game OF draw po-
kerr" She draws the poker with entirely too
much of an air and grace and brings 1t down
with vim on his devoted head.
A Young fellow at college wrote to his uncle,
OH whom he entirel, depended: My dear IN
cle-Ready for the needful Your aHectionate
nephew The uncle replied Dear nephew
The needful is not ready. Your atfectionate
uncle
A country girl rode into New Albany, Ind.
to do some shopping. When the clerk asked
if there was anything else he could do for her,
he was amazed by the reply: 'Oh no, sir, I'M
less you will go out and milk the old mare, for
rode her from home without the colt.
Americans, do you know who or what ''the
Cuyckanick puks, Yakutsk ylitmiks. Sakiatsky-
thinks, Ankachagamuks and Mekutonecutzol-
coorts'' are They are your feow-citlzens, and
live in Alaska, upon the Atutoacolakuchargut,
Nocotachigut, Kuyuyukuk, Connecovah, Una
lachlut and Golsova-Rlchka rivers.
Weare glad to know that there is one wealthy
local in the world According to his own fig
ures, the local editor of Missouri paper is the
wealthest newspaper man In the west. He
sums up his worldly possessions in this wise.-
Mrs Local (psr value) $1,000, 600; one seven
weeks old local, $3.50, 600; cash on hand, 43
cents due on account, 81 sundries, II cents.
Total, $780, 0l. SO yearly income, one local.
AN OLD CHICKEN. Tin attempting to carve
fowl one day, a gentleman found considerable
difficulty in separating its joints and exclaimed
against the man who had sold him an old hen
for young chicken. Pr
''My dear" said the enraged mans wife,
"don't talk SO much about the aged and res
pectable Mr. B he planted the first hill of
corn that was planted in our town."
81 know that" said her husband, land |
believe this hen scratched it up.
A singular financial transaction occurred in
one OF the dock oIhceS IN New YORK lew Gays
ago. By some means or other it happened
that the Office boy owed one of the clerks three
cents, the clerk owed the cashier two cents and
the cashier owed the Office boy tive cents. One
day last week the office boy having a cent in
his pocket concluded to diminish his debt and
and therefore handed the nickel over to the
clerk, who, in turn. paid half Of his debt by
giving the coin to the cashier. The latter
handed the cent back to the Office boy, remark
ing, now only owe you one cent. The Of
flee hey again passed the cent to the clerk, who
passed it to the cashier. who passed it back to
the Office boy. and the latter individual squared
all accounts, paying it to the clerk, thereby dis
charging his entire debt Thus it may be seen
how great is the benefit TO be derived from a
single cent if only expended iudiciously.