Iowa voter. [volume] (Knoxville, Iowa) 1867-1874, 1870-07-28
MlsCzLLAxDOUs ITEMS.
On A WEEPING sore-Love knot.

MsC1LLANEOUS ITEMS.
| Foa WEDDING SoNe-Love knot
THR HoMK MRIoDrsr The baby.
/ How no MAKE 4 FIRE Hor-Keep It
coalcd.
THE BEST Cras yoR vAxrrY-Be pho
| tographed.
6HR who can compose . cross baby is
greater than she who composes books.
| DIR. NxLAToN, the great French sur
geoc, c.-aed 100000 francs last year.
IT Is loanly here, as the sentimental
pawnbroker's daughter said Of her fathers
shop.
a nex in Grand Haven, Mich, reads
a. follows: "Steme Bote Offs Knext
Bilding."
A SHARP young fellow says, "if time ia
| money" he is willing to exchange little
of his for cash.
ENTERTAINING DoUBrs - Rubbish
Doubts are very far from being "enter-
taining;" they're extremely annoying.
THE latest marriage announcements
read thus: No cards, no cake, no pres
ents, no wedding trip, no honeymoon. no
| divorce.
IT is said that all Japanese women can
read, write and cipher An exchange
says -" In civilized nationsmen sigh-for'
them" Obi
Mr. g., is your customer D. man to
be trusted ?" II know Of no one more
so. He is to be trusted forever-he never
pays"
IT is said that experienced husbands
can tell when their wives are about To ask
for money, by the way they purse their
A REvENGRFUL individual in the exu.
berancc of his rage at some one who had
offended him, said "IIl have revenge.
I'll do something terrible. I'll give his
little boy tin horn"
A GIRL, hearing the lady of her house,
at dinner, ask her husband to bring dom
hey and Son with him when he came
home to tea, had two extra plates on the
table for the supposed visitors.
A CoRoNER's jury in Allegheny coun-
ty, Pennsylvania, rendered q verdict that
"the deceased came to his death by hang
ing, which was caused by his wife's scold-
ing the deceased because he was late TO
tea"
"AH, my dear fellow" said an old man
4 OuCC W q AlCAO, i 0A WC0h oAA O4OASA
down with age fused to walk entirely
round the park every day; but now can
only walk halfway round and back
again"
THE practice of distillery hands Of
bathing after working hours in the vats
of whisky, not only refreshes and cleans.
es the men, but adds to the body of the
liquor"
A MAN in South Hadley, who has just
got out of lawsuit, wants to obtain q
large framed picture OF COW, with one
client at the head and the other at the tail,
pulling, and the lawyers meanwhile quiet.
ly milking.
ScHRLL, the artist, is likewise punster
When with some Of his brethren out
sketching, one of the club proposed to
remain and sketch another landscape.
ooh, no." said Schell, lets sketch the
train"
A CONNECTICUT editor, commenting
upon the fact that a rival journalist is
rapidly cultivating champion bald head,
inquiries: whats the use Of q man hav-
ing hair, anyway, when he can fold his
ears over the top of his head"
"DoEs your officiating clergyman
preach the gospel, and is his conversation
and carriage consistent Herewith ?" was a
circular from bishop to church warden
of his diocese. A veteran near by replied,
He breaches the gospel, but does not
keep carriage"
"WHY are doctors called physicians,
mamma ?" said little inquisitive girl to
her mother, who had just been visited by
one of them. Physicians" replied
mamma, who was seldom at loss for an
|
tors ride about all day to seek fees"
MORE people are killed by lightning
than is commonly supposed. According
to some recently published statistics more
than 10000 people have been smitten by
the electric tuid within the past thirty
years. Of whom 2,252 were killed outright.
The fiery bolts, however, seem to make q
distinction on account of sex, for Of the
$50 killed within the last ten years, only
243 were females.
ACCORDING to the late James Y Simp-
son, there Is o single mandatory Of chic
makes as many as 5000 doses day, or be-
tween two millions and three millions of
doses every year--cvidence to what an ex-
tent the practice is now carried Of wrap.
ping men, women and children in a pain
less sleep during some of the most trying
moments and hours of human existence
/ A CORRESPONDENT of the Philadelphia
Post states that in Pennsylvania there is a
criminal and pauper population of about
$4,000, ninety per cent. of which has been
brought to degradation and want by in
temperance. The revenue Of the com.
monwealth derived annually from liquor
licenses Is about $420, 0C0, while the annu-
al cost to the people OF the State for sup
porting criminals and paupers, made such
by intemperance, is about 81, 100000.
| USEFUL AND SUGGESTIVE.