Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1870-12-10
EVENING STAR.
THE KoOsTERPECKED WIFE.


shink) some errors In Natural History. Who
ever saw a hen scratching up worms for a cock?
But We strongly suspect that there il concealed
snder the rural picture an attack upon some of
the oldest institutions OF society. DO You ask
- cOnCeited critic, what this seeming contradic-
lion means, and why We should print what We
abe words Of Shakespeare-mOderniZe
There are more things in heaven and earth,
cid Bachelor,
Than are drcamt of in your philosophy,
SCENE FIRST.
MIS-. Biddy Chandelier scratches for her
breakfast -. Chanticleer, Esq, from the top
fact. and struts with dignity toward his little
spouse.
BiddyT"GOod morning, my DEAR
u. o. Esq.-"Morning, madam; quite enjoy
ing yourself, madam; OF course you are not
aware OF the fact that have been up for more
man an hour, and have not yet eaten a mouth
Isi. h this what l married You for, madam?
ISlyes her pointed salute on the ankle.l
where are your domestic qualities madam!
imprints mark of affection on the top of her
head Where was your smile OF welcome when
you saw me getting of the fence? I watched you,
madam. Where was your tender female solicit
tude when you behe III me looking weakly for
want OF a little nOurIshment? Where, I repeat
ismy breakfast? Cock-s-doOdle-do!'
Biddy lmeekly). ''Have a worm. dear?''
q. G., Esq. (soIemnly). IL WILL
SCENE SECOND.
Mrs. Biddy Chanticleer LAYS her first egg and
has invited two or three female friends to hell
esekle ~. G., Esd, being absent
cut. cut-a-a-a- "a cut,''
Mrs. Partlett. "Qua, qua, qua, cut-a-a-
Mrs. Penfeather. s.Cluck. cluck, qua, qua.
cut. cut, cut a-a-a-a-a-cut," lis int-rTupyad
by the sudden appearance of o. u, ESP, who
has lust returned rom a stag party.I
~. G., Es'l. Cock a-dOodIe-CIo Now may
patience be y0uchsafed to me To ask OF Won
madam, what does all this mean? Here am
returning. careworn and exhausted, from the
eNcitements and temptations of a deiusiye world
expecting TO md repose and peace in the quiet
OF The domestic nest, instead OF which discover
you IN the midst OF Tot and dissipation. Madam,
insult not my penetration by denying i'll affirm
that you are having party,'
Mrs. Biddy (aPPrehensiyelyl. Not at all,
my dear; at least, that IL, my friends were Just
gong by, and stopped in quite accidentally and
so-fOr you see, my dear, Eve laid eggi cut,
cut cut, cut, cut a-s-s-a-c-that is, at least
YES, sir, eve laid an egg,"
Three female neighbors, simultaneously.
Cut, cut; cut, cut, cut-a-a-a-a-a cut.''
% Q, Esq. I'm sjestically). Peace, hens
Madam, what does all this csc kling folly mean;
iExeunt hens, in indignation.l
- T., Esg. at has become necessary. at this
state, in mild but usmistakabIe terms, INV
opinions regarding the appropriate sphere and
duties of henhOOd.
"First, self devotion: 1t has been the de-
eision Of all rooster kind, for ages, and there
fore cannot be denied, that the crowning virtue
OF the hen character is disinterestedness.
true hen should be patient, self-forg etful ODE
dent, tenderly solicitous for her husb Ands little
wants, delighting " holly and solely In the grace
Iai ana pieaSant outlee that cluster round the
domestic nest On the contrary, i find you
thinking only how TO gratify your own selfish
tastes and desires, instead of displaying (as
might naturally be e1pected) some little sense
Of loneliness and melancholy az your hnshand'.
Apeence; return from visit Of nearly twelve
ask II OF you, Is this true henhood?
second: A retiring disposition, a delicate
sbTinkiDg from contact with the coarse and nm
, =, world, an exclusive indifference
70 all without the sacred eirelo Of the domestic
nest On the contrary, I ind you gadding
among the other hens Of the ward, ma ing APP
polntmeis sending invitations. Again, sSk
OF you, madam, Is this true henhood5
THIRD: Freedom from curiosity: a true hen
ssvef eNlnces the slightest interest in the affair.
=, neI ne oors: scarcely in her own she never
inquiries concerning the Whereabouts or ac,ions
OF her husband. being perfectly assured that
wherever he may be, ana however appearance
AZ the time NAV seem 10 tell against him. he is |
ever acting with view 10 the welfare OF the !
domestic nest.
truth in regard 10 yourself? Not rooster raises
his voice within hall mile Of the ward but YOU
are able TO name him; not hen lays an egg,
but Won begin 10 caChle.'
Mrs. Biddy (meekly). ''T're laid an egg. cut
cut cut. cut Cut-a-1-a-a. No, | mean-yes,
.iT; we've laid an egg"
Land an egg? And pray, where is the thug
tWalks briskly TO the nest and takes a micro
scOpic view OF the Ohiect)
Biddy. ''Cut, cut mean. will n do, sir?-'
u. e., Is. "Humph-well, yes; very fair
considering though, now 1 look more closely
perceive that It IS not precisely shaped; too
short. madam, quite too short; not well finished
of, by any means. And what do yOa mean
madam by having the thing 50 much larger at
idea Of symmetry? BOUNDS madam. il This is
the best that Won can do in that DEPARTMENT
shall lay the next myself.'
Mrs Biddy with her claw in her eve).
"Please, couldn't help ii. / didn't rnssn To- =
q c. Esq (mOlliiei). Well well don't
fTet Your gizZaTG You're no chicken. madam
A he - aHx.
my advice in future. and recolIsr that TIE
GRO" wing virtue OF henhood Is d,sinterested-
IcSs.
Mr.. Biddv Cmeeklyl. .:Haye worm. ,Isare,.
o. T., Esq. (>olemnlyl. II will
sCESs THIRD.
MI, B!ddJ O. has 49,
weeks @ e., Eco, appears in the distance.
parting from one of his numerous female
friends; the tones OF his voice tall family on
O. G. Isl. And now, sweetest OF hem.
farewell. and may all the stars OF heaven. anu
all the saints OF the BARNARD, meet to register
the day when your smile dawned upon nv
weary lite. and made me- the hapiicSt Of roost-
ers- Farewell
ming. Jack. mOn>trOus tine hen, that. Just
been parting from her. Or NAV be you did not
notice her points Quite fond of me, too.
ahem. COck-a-dOOdie-do.'
-. q. reaches the domestic nest.
Mrs. Biddy (feebiyl. "Oh- I'm so glad to
have somebody to speak 20. | haven't steppeI
on the nest. nor seen a creature since sunrise.
How do you DO. my dear? Anything new going
on In the yard?'
A long pause -. G., Esquire. appears TO be
suddenly overwhelmed with depression and 81
lent gloom.
Mrs. Biddy. What's the matter. sir
g. G.. Es. Gin "A terrible voice, and walkiug
like tthellCi- Matter, Madam. behold ."
ilnseTJs his bill under Lis LEFT wing and pro
'iuce> a ROSTERS tai!-festher.l ..DO YOU recog-
ME that, madam DO Won acknowledge an
acquaintance with the chicken-hearted caitih
who dropped il? Are YOU aware thar / found il
within three feet Of the domestic nest?'
Mrs Biddy tlaDguidly.. did you3 | didn't
notice it,
%. G., EsG. e Peace. hen and listen, while
an calm but decisive terms 1 strive to impress
upon YOUR mind the enOrmity of YOUR conduct
ha> II not been decided | ask YOU calmly ma
dam has il not been the opinion OF roosterk Kind
Tor ages, and l. II not, therefore, undenfable
that (after sinterestedness) the one thing
needful TO the female character is excessive
nodesty. A true hen Is 50 strictly and severely
yirtuous that the slightest attempt at intimscy
from one OF an improper sex though disguised
beneath the sPeCiOus mask of friendship will
excite in her breast the EXTREMIST aversion AMI