The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1870-12-09
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A little boy was advised by his father
to use illustrations in his converse when
ever they should occur to him; for, con-
tinued the parent, there is no more fore
ible way of conveying or impressing
your meaning, especially to the young.
Shortly after, the boy was being lee
tured on generosity ats bette. to
give than receive, Johnny far better;
the Bible says so, and / say So"
illustrate it, pappy !: think will
understand you better"
Father could not see the application.
A Detroit lady complains that her
husband has fancy to "gaze lovingly
upon her while holding her out at arms
length by the hair; carresSing her
checks in a way that lifts hor clear across
the parlor without a come down until she
stopped for good"
A witness in the box, questioned by
lawyer as to the general reputation OF
another witness, was asked whether the
individual was no notorious mar
"Whv," said he, 'not exactly that but
he is what call an intermittent lar"
A gentleman who has unfortunately
broken his word, is anxious to procure
some cement that will repair it. The
same composition with which people
mend tboir manners may possibly ans
wcr.
amt going to live long mother"
said a wo-gone looking youngster, one
day, to his maternal parent. "Why not
pray ?'-"Because my pantloons is all
tored out behind" was the conclusive
answer.
A TrGHr Fm.-The editor ola Maine
pabcr SAYS that he has a pair of Of boots
given him which were so tight, thatthey
came very near making him Universal
list, because he received his punishment
as he went along.
A wouId-be-wit asked his uncle if the
tolling Of bell did not put him in mind
of his approaching end. ono, sir" he
replied, "but the rope puts me in mind of
yours"
"yyas it your eldest daughter, madam
that VAS bitten by monkey I" "No,
sir, it was my youngest, My oldest
daughter had worse misfortune she
married a monkey
A thirty-two months girl thus accosted
her patcrnal relative day or two ago;
Papa viii you buy me some hole to put
in my ears, so | can have some car
rings.
A Michigan census taker came across
an Intelligent man who had been married
five years, but had never inquired his
wifc's Christian name.
Il veteran was relating his exploits
to a crowd Of boys, and mentioned as
having been in FIVE engagements =
THAT'S nothing" broke in a little fell
low, my sisters been engaged eleven
times.
You will find one popularity very
prominent if you undertake TO so to the
dovil-the path leading to him always
points, as the swine went, down hill.
Make monument of good deeds as
YOU 20, and your dust will not want for
friends to see to the marble in after
years.
4 young man in Ohio recently opened
clothing store, and was sent to Jail for
it. Reasonable clothing store belonged
TO another man.
The measles are.in Brigham Young S
family 1t is unnecessary to add that
there arc not enough to go around, and
several dozen are left without measle.
A lady caught her husband breaking
her hoops. Two hours afterwards the
unfortunate man was seen at drug store
purchasing hair restorative.
The grand essentials 10 happiness in
this life are: something to do, some
thing tc love- something to hope
for.
An IqN Aertises for a hus-
t G%"a aos ssgNs1E s'' ''''' " '
TO make a man drunkard, give him
wife who will scod him every time he
comes home.
Oar neighbours children are always
tbc worst Is.