Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1870-07-01
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
BIIss-Plenty of money.

her the same day.
A FRIEND ATA PINcH-One who shares
his snuff.box with you.
WHEN is an original idea like a clock
When it strikes one.
No Notes are deducted from the policies
at maturity in the Washington.
WHEN a person declares that his "brain
is on fire." Is II etiquette to blow it out
"a CAT may look "-the picture of in.
nocence, but don't leave it alone with the
canary.
Tom THUMB has his life insured, and
many greater than he are insured in the
Washington.
A HlNDoo proverb says; "Strike not,
even with flower, a wife, though she
has thousand faults"
A BACHELOR, according to the latest
definition, is a man who has lost the op-
portunity of making woman miserable
If we did but know how little some en-
joy the great things they possess, there
would not be so much envy in the
world.
IL am going to the post.ofiice, Bob,
shall | enquire for your" "Well, yes, if
you want to; but don't think you'll find
me there"
IT is not necessary that a postman
should possess good voice, but it is
most essential thing that he should have
good delivery.
| A CHICAGO paper says that among those
for whom prayers were asked in the daily
| prayer. meeting, was, for young man
in Boston, too far from God"
In the classic town of Waterville on a
garden fence facing the street, is posted
| fho fol1pxtr;Vor nc ~ DIaae
hich no Hoses Hear for it is sode."
DIoGENEs being asked, "the biting of
which beast is the most dangerous" an
swered, "If you mean wild beasts 'tis the
slanderer's; if tame ones, the flatterer's.
MAMMA" And now, pussy, you have
chatted enough. Shut your eyes, hold
your tongue and go to sleep" Pussy
How can do three things at once, NAM
mar"
HUNGRY DINER-"Trouble you for
some more bread, landlord. l always eat
a good deal of bread with my meat"
Landlord-"So see, sir And a good
deal of meat with your bread"
BUB, is your sister at homer" Eyes,
but she won't see you to-night." Why's"
Because she said she was going to have
one more mess of onions if she never got
another beau"
A LITTLE boy, running, stubbed his toe
and fell on the pavement. "Never mind,
my little fellow" said by-stander "you
won't feel the pain tomorrow" "Then,
answered the little boy, 81 won't cry to-
morrow"
THE man in possession is always the
man to respect. A deputy replied to au-
other who was extolling M. Olivier: "He
is marvellous in duty, and only one man that
know is his superior" (Which one?"
"The one that will succeed NJ. OLIVIER"
was the neat reply.
! ROBINSON met Smith as he was going
| on board steamer on the Mississippi,
and asked, (which way, Smith-lp or
down }" That depends upon circum-
stances" remarked the latter. "If get
a berth over the boiler, shall probably
| go up; if in the cabin, down"
81 FEEL" moaned a dying cobbler,
that | wax weaker every day, and that l
am gradually approaching my end-only
a few more stitches, and awl will be over.
L. heaven there is rest for the sole-earth
has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal"
Having said awl he wished, he calmly
breathed his last.
A YOUNG SWELL joining his companions
one day, who were loafing on a corner,
commenced picking his teeth, and said he
had just eaten whole chicken for his
dinner. One of his companions, a wag-
gish fellow, responded, | see you have,
for there is one of the feathers" pointing
to piece of mush which had fallen on
his coat.
JOE KING was sick in q boarding house,
and made his mind up for some chicken
broth. The order went down into the
Kitchen, and the broth came up weak, fiat,
and insipid. The sick man was subse-
quently relating his disappointment to
friend, who said, "They just let a chicken
wade through it." "If they did" said
Joe, family, "it had on stills" He re-
covered.
PROFESSOR S., of Hartford, said the
other day that he felt uncomfortably stiff
and sore caught cold perhaps-and he
lay down on lounge and requested his
friend W. to knead and rub him after the
movement cure style. w. gently beat him
on the chest. "How hollow it sounds"
said K, who was looking on. "Thats
nothing" said W.; wait till get to his
head"
A FEW years ago, little fellow was
taken by his father to carpenter, to be
bound apprentice to him, after the fashion
OF those times. In settling the business,
the master, who was one of the stiff kind,
observed: "Well, boy, suppose you can
eat most anything, can't you? 1 always
make my boys live on what they don't
like" love everything but mince-pie
and apple pie" was the boys instant re-
ply.
Mr.. A, of F, was Joker. He
once represented his town in the Legisla-
ture, and on his way to the capital stopped
to dine at hotel. On putting ON his coat
to start he had much difficulty in work
ing into it. Some one remarked that the
tailor had given him tight fit. "Oh,"
said he, "the tailor did well enough, but
the last representative from our town tods
a good deal smaller than / anl!" 1t ap-
pears that they had legislative coat in
F., which each representative filled in
| turn. When A was nominated they
forgot his rotundity of person.
THE strictly industrial classes of
France number about 1899 in every 49,
900 inhabitants, or 10,949, ,091 in the whole
population. The number of men engag-
ed in commerce is 737,675; of women,
779,4S3. Out of population of rather
more than 3S,000,000 people, about Is, ,59S,-
900 are agriculturally inclined and it is
curious that more women than men by
1000 are ENGAGED in field labor. Com.
merce in Paris supports about 215,000
people, and banking societies of vari-
Gus kinos, $4,000. The concierges," or
"pOrters," who attend to the general bus
mess of the numerous lodging houses,
number nearly $4,000.
A case of purpura occurred lately at
Bloomfield, Pa. A little daughter of j.
r. Shuler was taken with bleeding at the
nose, and as il continued for some time a
doctor was called in Not apprehending
cause for alarm, he was about TO assure the
mother that hemorrhage would soon be
stopped, when she called his attention to
dark red spots on the chest and limbs of
the child. He at once saw that it was
case of that rare disease known as pur-
pura, and administered medicine promptly,
but of no avail other than topartially stop
the bleeding for a short time. 1t appears
that the blood sought escape from its
natural channels throughout her whole
system, and actually oozed out at one of
her eyes, HemOrrhage from the stomach