The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1870-12-16
The 9euorrat.
.DECEMBER l6, 1870.
4 vICTIM TO THE TooTHACHE.

I had the too.hache yesterday. That
iafernal little tooth Of nina held q bushel
of ache. It ached clean down to the toe
of my boot it was regular o X ache
too! My face swelled 50 my most famil.
lar creditor didn't know me. lou
wouldn't have wanted much of my jaw.
Every time the tooth jumped, 1t lifted me
clear off the chair. / really thought l
should go crazy-you probably think my
fare wouldn't cost me much begged for
arevolver to end my momeutous mo-
mcnts.
IreEemberedofa "a quart bottle ofstrych-
aine IN the house. | got it and drank il
slf; didn't even take out the cork
sucked il in-and prepared to die. Blu,
suddenly L discovered the label ss.0ld
Rye" on it.. The label played the mis-
chief with intentions. lfis hadn't been
for that label! st.t.as,s ~
/ laid down on the floor, rolled over and
Immediately got up. "A good many peo
pie who are depending on me-for various
snms-hearing of my danger-or .hei,
danger-came in to tell me what they did
not know was good for the toothache, bat
begged me to do something, as they were
sure was not prepared to go yet.
The ladies sympathized with me. One
said she had not had the toothache for
many years; butts hadn't tooth in
her head. One old maid declared she
had it 10 her two front teeth very badly
only the day before but knew private.
ly that ali her teeth are false. All the
while my tooth, with the spirit of hun
dred aches, was beating time to the mu
sic of Fishers Hornpipe. snatched ,ht
tongs and ran up stairs and worked for tif
teen inmates to pull the internal tooth
but it wouln't bulge an inch.
7 i had notion to 60 to the dentist, bur
then I got afraid he might pull it. Il
means business to go there. But start
ed three or four tin es, hoping it ould stoI
aching before got to our gase-which i
didn't. Finally crammed my hat over
my eyes, took my face in both hands, anc
started.
l was crazier than [ eEer was in my lif;
and that is saying good deal. me. &;
fellow | owed, and paid him FIVE dollar.
Il was so ont of my head. -
Isneared the dentists door. tsg
1nerved myself up-so did the tooth
and then with heroism worthy of 4
better cause-went past, and around
home again. thought of the river;
then thought of that young lady who had
mistaken me for a single man. and then
went back to the dentists room.
Shut my ewes and went iu-
I asked him what he'd give me to lei
him pull the TOOTH. He said laughing
gas. | told him it was no laughing mat
ter, and didn't want any of his gas
He told me to sit down and enjoy myself
and he'd pull it out anyhow. l begged
him to pull easy on it; he got his fo-cep:
on it, then [ asked him what ed take te
let me off without pulling the tooth. He
told me to hold on. | held on his arm.
A second And I thought my head had
been a bombshell, and had busted.
asked the dentist if my backbone had
come up with it, and felt of my face te
see if it was all there.
But the tooth was we'll out.
It was the frst time in his life he had
ever made the mistake of pulling the
right tooth the first trial Yes, there or
the table lay my little tooth-still aching
away! Il was true to its Instincts
When the dentist asked me for his pay,
told bim TO charge it. l was sure / hac
got into my right mind again.
My face has all gone down sgain, but
fatter myself l have still enough left Il
dobusiness on. % sSGT BE5JG