The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1870-07-14
agit aud Au,,.es.


A NEEDING NIoHr IEcIDENr,--It
wasn't hardly the fair thing that tho
boys did to Joe Thompson the night
he was married, but the temptation was
irresistible, They ea4ld not have help
ed it to have saved their lives. I'll
tell you how it was
Joe was about the most fancy dressed
chap in town---over nice and particular
Ia perfect Miss Nancy in D,anDer, al
ways putting on airs, and more dainty
and modest than girl. Well, when
his wedding night came he was dressed,
trunk empty, aud his pants, especially
fitted him as ii they had been molds,
and his legs candles, aud run into thcm.
Tight was no name for them. Their set
was immense, and he was prouder than
half dozen pcacocks.
Aren't they nice, boys 7" he asked
Of the two who were to be groomsmen.
and see that he threw himself away in
the most approved fashion.
Stupninl Gorgeous !" replied Tom
Bennett sNcser saw anything equal
to them. But say, Joe, aren't they
just the least bit tightg Il strikes mo
that you will have some difficulty in
bending won't you 7"
/" Pshaw, no They are as easy al, an
old glove see r
10 prove the matter he bent down 50
as TO touch his patent feathers, when
crack ! crack ! followed like the twin
report Of d revolver.
I" Thunder r exclaimed Joe, as he
clasped his hands behind aud found a
rent 10 the cashmere from stem TO stern.
Thunderl the pants have burst aud
what shall do?'
should think they had, !" answered
Tom, getting purple in the face as he
endeayored to control his laughter,
" But there is no time to get another
pair. Il only wants half an hour TO the
stand.up time and We have mile to
60. Carriage waiting, too"
What shah / do? what shall I
do 2"
"I'll tell you what Joe, ifmiue would
fit you should have them and well
come, but they are mile to big.
see no way bat 10 have them mended."
Who can get to do it, Tom p
Well, | am something of q tailor
and can FIX them so that they won't
STOW. Hold on a minute and III got
4 needle aud thread"
4 Il Can you 7 May heaven bless your
"0f with your coat" commanded
Tom, as he came back. "Now lay YOUR
self over on the bed and Ill FIX you 10
short order"
| The command was obeyed--.the pants
mended--the coat tails carefully pinned
over, SO as to conceal the distress for
rent, and all went merry as marriage
bell, until Joe followed his blushing
bride to The natal couch.
| There was only dim light in the
room, but il enabled Joe, as be glanced
bashfully around, to see the sweetest
face in the world, the rosy cheeks and
ripe lips, the lovely and loving blue
eyes, and the golden curls just pecping
out from the snowy sheets, aud he ex-
tinguished it altogether, and fastened
to disorbe himself. OE came coat, vest,
fancy necktie and collar, boots aud socks
in . hurry; but somehow the pants
stuck. The more he tried, the moro
| they wouldn't come, and he tugged vain
| ly for half an hour.
Thunder J" mnttcred joe
| What is the matter, dear 7" came
in the sofest Of accents from the bed,
where somebody was wondering what il
was that annoyed him.
1t was moment Of desperation. Joe
was entirely overcome by the situation,
and forgetting his bashiulncss, blprtsd
out:
! Molly, that cursed Tom Bennett
has sewed my pants, drawers, shirt and
undershirt, all together !"
1t is too bad Wait momeuE,
dear"
| A little stockiugless foot first pecped
out, thaua rufiied night dress, the lamp,
was lighted, pair ofscissors found and
Joe released, mentally vowipg that II
every he got the opportunity no would
/ nav his friend Tom back with ;ntareek