The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1870-07-17

49, esA0 SAsCA f0o0u IN Cl0T8s
what's man wants-all he can get. VIII
- woman wanta-an she can't get.
There is man in town so bashful th
seldom gets acquainted with the facts.
Ihieve. % not have very quiet life
easy.S .7''i-7 '''A' 'n'nss
Soft soap, in some shape, pleases All. an,
2neraly speaking, the more I've you pt
INTO IL tho better.
" You seem to walk moro erect tina
usnsl my dear mir" I" Yes, / have bee
szaightened by circumstances.n
When doesa young lady utter the mos
valuable wordsf When she speaks in Gail
very accents"
\ Uninteresting companions are rirls {,
ehetr gfggiehood and boys in their BOBBY.
A dandy ON shore is disgusting to man,
H4eople, but swell Of the sea siekens every.
h body.
B josh Billings says there is nothing more
a touching in this life than to see q Door bnf
Evirtuous young man struggling with weak
&m0ustache.
ri 81 am astonished, my dear young ladv.
- your sentiments you make me start"
ia Well, SIR, I've been waiting for YOU to
TART for the last hour"
III Why il real friendship to be fonnd
among bakers more thsn any other class
because they are always ready to help each
tother in time of need.
Sonny, does your father take d paper %
Yes, cir, two of them; one belongs to
II. Smith and the other to Mr., Thomnsons
hooks them off the stoop."
a We heard of fellow the other dav whose
fife told him he had better lay in his wood
Don. He Obeyedz by going home dmnk
md laying in his wood shed all night.
i a hungry, Jew, paying particular atten-
hon to q ham, was asked what he was saw.
ing to il. He replied, at was saving al |
9ost thou persuadest me to be a Gh1is-
In reply to . young writer, who wished
z know which magazine will give me the
tghest position quickest" contemporary
|dyises. .a powder magazine, if you con-
kiUats . fiery article"
A wife recently cured her husband of
fhistling "Shoo fly when she was lectur-
% him for being out late at nights, by let Ii
ing her shoe fly at his head with such
prco a. to give him the headache for ,
Reek. !
Alta recent criminal trial the foreman :
the jury, placing his hand on his heart, ! !
ID with voice choked with emotion.
$ve In the following verdict, The accused
$guilty, but we have our doubts as to the I
fbntity." n
la little boy, running, stubbed his toe and .
u on the pavement. "Never mind, my :.
BE .sa DsIa 'sia 5ysta9dss Son
Fered the little boy, "I won't cry to-
brow q
"a colored cook expected company, and y
as at loss how to entertain her friends. a,
or mistress said, "Chloe, you can make r.
apology" LA, missis, how can make o,
I got no apples, no eggs, mo butter, no SC
hin TO make it wild" W
Asaady passing along the street, was met
young man, who, in passing, stepped OF
arked, Hoops take up too much ROOM" fo
, which the lady quickly replied, I" Not dis
much as whisky, sill, and passed on. az
An order was to Chicago book re
Her, which, among other things, enumer- hi
I'd, Six Primitive Christianity" 1t was wi
ns back with the response penciled OPP ev
site theftem, and not at all in jest, "No WI
imitiTe Christianity to be found in Chi OF
yo1 &c
An idler boosted to farmer of his an Tn
Mt family, laying much stress upon hav- ma ma
! descended from an iilustrtous man who TN
ID several generations ago. $50 much SUI
worse for you" replied the farmer "for
find the older the seed, the poorer the fly
n" it
'ome time since gentleman died who do
lAu8 ulk MA0 ISluSe1 " UolAoV0 III 8uOCn0r |
rid. Two or three weeks after his de- me
'e-his wife resolved, through medium, fas
which read as follows moi
lear wife, + now believe, please send me An An
thin clothes.n lit
% King was sick in boarding house, an'
made his mind mp for some chickenl VIC
sh, The order went down into the az a.
hen, and the broth came up weak, fiat Sn Gu,
insipid. The sick man was subse. LOU LOU
ntly relating his disappointment to n AZ
nd, who said They just let CHECKER, o und
le through'it." If they did, said Joe anS
tly, 20 Is had on stills" s sino
Gentleman called on miser and found fold
&c tho table endeavoring to catch fly. MAJ
sently he succeeded in entrappiDg one,
Cd lo Immediately put into the sugar
= and shut down the cover. The gen. ~
ian asked for an explanation of this G &c
uiar procSeding. "Ill tell you, replied iDfd
miser, with triumphant grin, "I want dat
scertain II the servants steal the sugar." posi-
q thei
ato. - D1N Noy rarely Onlect 10 an hear
easesofs salary but we find in an ex- inc.
lgee capital story of an old Connecticut natl
on who declined 1T for very substantial VIII
Dnss His country parish raised his of
" from three hundred to four hundred Chul
srsa The good man objected for three Lond
pms: /" First, because you can't afford
we more than three hundred. Second Al
use my preaching isn't worth more than the
Third, because have to collect nav ing
", which heretofore has been the harti-1 ever
BART Of my 1abofs among yOu. III Of Il
60 collect an additional hundred IL but
lIiM MOP Tour