New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1870-07-17
THE CENSUS TAKER.
The Trials of n Family.

am a peaceful man, and so is my wife,
although she is of the female persuasion.
"Let us have peace and red, white and
blue picture of General Grant hang to-
gether on the wall over my mantelpiece;
but can be stirred up, and SO can my wife,
when we consider that our rights are in
vaded or our privileges trampled upon:
We are American citizens, and understand
what liberty means, and endeavOr to carry
out our understanding in all things; hence
my wife washes the pavement. like good
American citizen she is, three times every
day, Sundays excepted. But that's got
nothing to do with the story, further than
it carries us to the place where the COM
mencement of it commences.
Thusy her name is Arathusa, but call
her Thusy out Of atfection) was washing the
pavement as is her usual custom, yesterday
morning, while / cooked the breakfast.
When just about turning the mackerel for
the last time, heard her well known voice
say:
"Senses! Yes; sir, you couldn't have
taken many senses, or else the senses you
did take were as weak as water, or you'd
never planked your big foot on that white
marble step, just the moment I've got it
wiped Off"
The man said something which | couldn't
understand, but l could hear Thusy, and
from the tone of her voice knew she was
riled. I'm well acquainted with her
You are going into the house, are you y
The man said he was, and before l could
take my apron off he was in the kitchen.
"Well, SIR" said Thusy, since you're
here, and want senses, spose you proceed
and get 'um. You needn't look at him." she
continued, $50 go on with your business and
get OUT" and she rested her broom Oh her
arm and sat down, looking the man in the
face.
1--WE get" said the man, eve get so ac-
custOmed to going about among people, that
our conduct looks a little impudent; but,
madam, l assure you that nothing of that
kind is intended" And the man got out
little book and lead pencil.
Thusy looked at me, as much as to say,
"Fl give him enough" and then he COM
menced asking questions.
"Are you married p he asked.
Thusy's eyes shot fire, and l expected
rumpus. She looked at me, and says:
.Blusher, 60 up stairs and get him our mar
riage certificate"
"Oh, never mind that" said the man,
just be kind enough to answer my ques-
tons"
That's my husband said Thusy, nod
ding at me. had sat down, and the mack
erel was Citing cold
"How many children have you got ?"
Three" said Thusy.
"What are they!'
Human beings" said Thusy, sharply.
~ mean, how many are males, and how
many are females p said the man, very
politely.
"Three girls, all females remarked
Thusy.
Living p said the man.
Dead" said Thusy. Been dead these
ten years."
'Why didn't you say SO at first y said the
man, little mad.
''Cause you didn't ask" said Thusy, cast
ing a triumphant glance at me.
what is your business at present :" asked
the man, looking at me.
"Cookin," snapped Thusy, before l could
say word
What is your trade, sir p said the man,
pointing at me with his pencil.
.! am printer" said l.
Nv nat Is your income I"
Don't have any" said Thusy, Its all
gone before it comes I'M
"YOur salary!"
you must be fool said Thusy, jump
ing up; Its out of season.
MADAM, you don't appear to understand
me. What amount of money do YOU receive
a week for your work p
told him, and he put it down.
Have you trade, madam q he asked of
Thusy.
"A dozen of EN-
'Dressmaker or mantua maker1"
"Yes," said Thusy.
(Which :" asked the man.
"Both," said Thusy
anything else y
yes"
"Whatr'
"Slewerin', cookin', washin'. mendin'.
maxim, readin', and washin' pavements"
When she said the last she looked at me
again. l understood. and could take my
oath to the correctness of the last business
mentioned.
"How many horses have your
"One," said Thusy.
whats he WORTH
"He was worth about ten dollars, but l
don't suppose he'd fetch more than dollar
and a half now"
"What color is he!'
"Red, white and blue"
Ridiculous said the man putting the
pencil behind his ear Madam he con-
tinued, =" this won't do. If you have horse,
what kind of one is hel"
l thought Thusy would burst. She was
internal mad for it looked as if the man
was doubling. her word
q A wooden rocking horse she shouted.
ha a Il /