Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1870-12-08
MiSfrltanfuuS.
For the Chronicle.
THF STEAM-TOssED OHIO.


some earlier period of thy history thou
hadst the then thrilling satisfaction o
crossing the great Ohio river in i ferry
boat, and art still delighted with the
memory of that experience; but dds
ever float far down the stream il /
gueenly palace to Queen-ly city p
Pardon such a question! Editors now
a-dgys sit in their sanctums, weaving
news webs with shuttles of lightning.
Reader of the period, how is it with
you? The burden of proof is yours
Nothing short of being shot out of s
cannon, even at the risk of its danger
secures desirable rate of speed to the
modern traveller. He insists upon be
ing AWIcd-a although. perchance, ''intc
puddle and out of the :. orld." i fu.
ture not remotest may search Tor steam
boats in the same manner as the present
does for brachipods and trilobites-little
vessels which have gone before.
I hope, reader, (dear or otherwise
that ou are now duly anxious, as was
10 learn something about the anomaly
of steamboat ride. If not, then may
the young Demosthenes at the next
meeting of your literary society thor
oughly impress you with the ''impor-
tance of the question"
( IfyOu wish to take boat-ride, one OF
the first things necessary is TO go to the
river, and be there when the boat comes.
1t is better to be there several days be-
fore, exercising faith, hope and patience
the greatest of these being patience
that come soon it certainly will. Just
when, [ caunot tell; but in the night,
surely, and at an hour which no man
knoweth. I nesd not describe the period
of my waiting. 1t was at last rewarded.
An unearthiy noise, somewhat like unto
Z prolonged eroak OF q monster bull
frog, came tearing its way through the
air TO the landing. As the animal came
Kissing into view it seemed like a mon
ster Internal, with flaming fire stream
ing from its hundred nostrils. But the
les ors Of Jack the giant-killer had not
been lost; and as the signaling lantern
beckoHed the fire-eater towards me, l
- waited for him. There was 10 occa-
sion for q certain gentieman's asking me
what / vas shaking so for; the weather
was chilly, and he knew it. Didn't
whistle - keep courage up; knew the
old puff Gad blower could out whistle
me. Went on board; the boat whirIed
back into the channel, and her wheel
began clipping the watery waste.
"Walk up into the cabin, sah," says
the porter" l followed him, with q
vision in my mind ofthe historical log
cabin; but when the door OF the apart
ment opened, an unwonted scene Of
nagnificence burst through and aston
islled the vision away. 1 found the
cabin parlor resplendent with the
decorations of a superb taste; all. was
brilliance anu gayety, and methought
the fitting fairies of hundred stories
gathered round to welcome me to their
delightful home. Better see the clerk,
sah," interrupted the porter. Saw the
cIerss: Eight dollars, sir; state room 38,
sir" Found "3S" on door and enter
ed. Room rather small, with two
shelves over and under each other, to
sleep on. The old maxim "There's
lways room on the upper shelf" came
to my aid, and, after some de!iberation,
[ made ventures and was aloft. I had
0oen told what a splendid place it is for
meditation, especially when you can't
sleep. Went back in time TO the Begin
ming af my journey and began diligently
TO search out in detail the relations of
its parts. Hadn't this proud vessel gone
ashore at my bidding, alone; and hadn't
I, besides, been honOred with the State
room? And = tramp, tramp, on the
roof, everlastingly. The old whistle,
tCo, became nuisance dire. 1t seemed
situated just above in the dome of my
little state house, and if it couldn't COM
pei tie iron -ngs in painful hoarseness
10 endure the deafening Strain fer full
half hour the first OF second trial l. was
sure TO try it again. And then the deck
hands were eternslly Changing their
shovels in the Goa Of an adjacent barge.
But. at last comparative
silence like a poultice came,
TO heal the blows of sound.'
and with tLe splashi. IS Of the wheel
for lullaby foated away in Great
Eastern OF my own into dreamland.
Next morning 1 found the boat lied
up, waiting for the lifting of dense
fog. Oh the sloping bank WAS ranged :;
splendid geological cabinet, exceedingly
rich in its collection Of fminerals-many
c:lored, artistieally shaped and highly
polished. In reply to question as to
where these valuable specimens Were
procured, an apparently intelligent and
respec able gentleman said lie didn't
know. ! don't, either; do you?
after while we started. The two
banks had great difficulty in keeping
Oh their own side of the ri ier. When
the boat turned around, the points of
the compass were sure to turn with it;
and at night "the dipper" lost its handle
and the considerations played at leap
frog upon the revolving horizOn.--
There, sir" pointing a gentleman to
my native State, as L thought, There is
this country's hif hest exponent of free
dom, civilization and knowledge!n--
"You're the first man [ ever heard say
that OF Kertucky, sir" said he, "you
must mean Ohio, on the other side"
This first day on the river was Sun
day, as L discovered by q calendar.--
Boat,nen, like the curren! of the river, |