The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1870-02-28

y
sER.-IFashington, February ls.-This il
queer place-a very queer Place-as
everybody knows who hns been here, and
everybody believes who hasn't. Materials
for biography accumulates so fast that l
hope distinguished gentlemen, autoblo-
graphically inclined, who accept nomina-
tons for Congress, will stipulate with their
constituents to serve no longer than one
term. I think some such arrangement
would be the far thing to posterity. a
distinguished member from your own State
related to ME the following bit Of personal
experience. which relished none the less
on account of secret which it revealed
touching his appearance that l had never
imagined. After this fashion be spoke |
was returning leisurely along the avenue
from the capitol yesterday afternoon en-
crossed in my thoughts and watching the
Wreatls of smoke that gracefully curlel
from No. Partagas which the President
had given me to try, when at the corner OF
Sixth street my attention vas attracted by
the movements Of an urchin who was
wringing his hands and gazing up and
down the avenue with evident eagcrness
and anxiety. AS soon as he saw me his
face lost its anxious expression, and run
ming up to me, half breathless, he ez-
claimed
ooh, sir, she told me to tell yer to come
right away She's bin q lspsin', and she'd
thought yer'd come long ago"
"Who-which-whatf" I burst forth,
somewhat confused BY the suddenness of
the call, and dropping my cigar as / spoke.
eyes, cir, she described yer to me-a
man with black eye and red Whiskers."
"Black eye and red whiskers ejacu-
lated with amazement-having but few
days before submitted my luxuriant beard
to an ordeal of glossy black ut fashiona-
BILE barber Sired whiskers 2-impossi-
blel And without waiting to ascertain
the object of the little vagabond's exhorta-
ton made for the establishment of my
tonsorial Tantalus, and there, sure enough,
in the first glass which reflected my image,
stood confessed in all the naked deformi-
ty of my natural hair. turned upon the
supposed author of my ealmity, who was at
the time bandishing his razor in artistic pa
rabolas about the chin Of senator Sumner,
and angrily demanded, Tell ME, sir, how
is this ?"
He appeared horror-stricken at seeing
me, and TREMENDOUSLY gasped out:
"Oh, cir, you have been-you have been
| been -
"Where have been and why do you
ask Z"
my dear sir, pardon me-but you have
been at the Presidents dinner"
The remark staggered me for how should
the fellow know this-and what had it t.
do with the horrible metamorphosis my
beard had undergone. He started forward
| grasped my hand, peered into my face
anxiously, and excitedly asked:
| 4" You drank no coffee }" .. .-....
"No." ST..
| You drank no tea!"
| "Not drop" ..
| "You drank no whiskey?"
"Yes, you bet every time"
"Ah, ha, then" he shouted demoni
acally; "your whiskers are poisoned, sir
outrageously poisoned, and the whiskey dit
it. dyed three senators and four mem
beers of Congress for thut COMPOUNDED din
ner, and every one Of them came to NJ
within twenty-four hours after, cursing lik
troopers, and with boards that spanne'
their faces ike o rainbow. 1t was al
owing to the Internal whiskey, sir; au'
though I never swear, you will permit IN
to soy that for the last two days l hav
done scarcely anything else but damn tn
wretch who furnished it,