Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1870-04-12

teoidH Suu, Wuere uer lertHe valleys anu yer
dant fields would revive your dropping spirits
and soon would have your prosperity to b.
commensurate with your posterity, and boil
with the ultimatum of your wishes. Brethren
the foregoing metaphor teens with its owl
suggestions, and will you not so act upon then
as to lead yourselves, and an equal number o.
the gentler sex to rejoice over your mutual de-
| hyerance from the bonds of single-wretched
| ness? Quitting for while this sublunary
! state and soaring upon the wings of the morn.
Ing to the uttermost parts of creation, let us
| trace there, IT we can, any analogy between
your condition and course of life and the con-
stitution and course of the worlds or system OF
worlds as they move on in their appointed
spheres. Science has informed us that all the
elements of matter composing this and all the
other heavenly bodies are held together by the
cohesive power of gravitation, that somehow
draws them towards one common centre of at
traction and union, and but for this great fun
damental law of nature these worlds or systems
OF worlds would so far as we know, tumble in
pieces OF be dissolved into infnitismal atoms,
filling the boundless ether with their nebulous
foatings and leaving no foothold or foundation
Tor the existence or maintenance of any living
thlng-no not SO much as for one lone bache-
lor. SO we discover, dear brethren, from the
tiny flowers blooming at our feet, upon the vast
and ponderous globes filling the regions of i'm
menslty, the presence and necessity of the
great sustaining and lfe-giving principle Of
unlon-uniOn, and hence it is as clear as sun
beam and as inevitable as fate that our lives of
dlsunion bearing no analogy, but sad excep-
ton to this ali-wlse arrangement OF all things
and keeping US far beyond the range Of cohe-
slve influences OF Hymen's sun, must be the
means of scattering our hearts affections and
our hopes to the four winds Of disappointment
or despair. And having all our powers and
purposes of mind and of heart, drawn into
this great malstrom Of disasters, they must go
down like the ill-fated ship and be dashed in
pieces, or else weak and lonely and wan, we
are left to perish in the wilderness of celibacy,
sess the promised land Of conjugal felicity
Now, dear brethren, since we have failed to
take time by the fore-lock in this delectable en-
terprise, and as many Of US can not be taken'
by the top-lock, let us be persuaded to better
things, if not by the impressive circumstances
OF our present unhappy surroundings, by the
very inspiring political and material hopes and
prospects looming up all around u.s. In as
much as the old Commonwealth, long under
the dark cloud Of military despotism, has just
passed into the bright sunshine Of the union,
and started, as we trust, upon new and more
lasting career of prosperity and renown. So
may We very soon be emerging from under the
dark and rainless clouds Of ceibacy and come
out into the gladstone sunshine Of connubial
felicity. Then moving Oh in our normal, nat
ural and appointed spheres of action, with all
the powers of the inner and the outer life in
full CO operation and play-dispensing like the
king Of day the rays of parental solictude and
care on all the young satellites around us, we
shall cease to be the mere chinklng and daub-
ing in the great structure OF society, and must
become the nonored and happy instruments of
enIarging the bounds Of human hopes and hap
piness, as they are to be found along the bright
and frightening vista of posterlty. Now, dear
brethren, will you not be persuaded to leave,
right away, the Sodom and Gomarrah of single
life and tarrying not in all the plains, flee to
the better state" ere your decrepid and tot
tering locomotives may not be sufficient to bear
you onward, and SO you be left, if not pillar
of salt, yet shrivelled monument Of the help
lessness of your lot, and | hope sufficient
wa, ming to all succeeding generations.
Oh, but after all you mayebe ready to say,
We would prefer your example 'te your precept,
and if you give us that We possibly may be led
to follow in your illustrious footsteps Well,
dear brethren, | do declare to you that l am
just now quite as much, if not more In the con
juga mood than ever before, and as | have
wandered just long enough along the borders
OF the great moral Oanara OF single llIe TO dlS-
cover that within her wide wastes there is not
one single oasis upon which my eyes or my
hopes might rest, am resolved and re-resolved
very shortly or very soon thereafter Dec DO
lente) to shake the very dust of celibacy off my
understandings, and to take up my line of
march, gladly and joyously, for
That land of mixed delight
Where bachelors where tarry,
Where Hymen's rays dispel the night
And lead one on to-marry.
So you will please announce to all the world
and the rest of mankind, or rather more of
woman-knd, that | remain yours for little
while in the bonds of single wretchedness.
UNUS SINGULORUM.
N. BIN view Of the urgency and impor-
tance of this appeal the indicator and Nir--
ginian will please copy u. S.
WApNJ SDpTNnS VA