National opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1865-1874, 1870-08-19
Wit and Wisdom.
HlGH Destiny-Hangine


PATIENCE on a monument slow mar
ble-cutter.
WHAT is home without baby? Com
paratively quiet.
THE course OF true love is race where
often there is false start.
HUMAN faces are said to be good libra
rie~ and picture galleries IN one.
A DENTIST can never be a rich man, as
he always lives from hand to mouth.
DO NOT go to church with "A cough and
+ disturb the rest of the congregation.
WHAT is that which by losing an eve
has nothing but nose left "A noise
Do YOU enjoy good health, Zachary"
% Why, yes. to be sure who doesn't %
IF you wish to hatter a fool, ask his
advice ii you wish to be one follow it,
The geological character OF the rock
on which dIunkards split is said to be-
quartz
DoNp take too much interest in the
affairs "l Nolu neighbor Six per cent
will do
Tn man who sat down on il paper of
tack~ said they reminded him of the In
come tan
PROMISES made in time of atfiiction re-
quire a better memory than people com
monty possess.
The MOST EXCLUSIVE CIRCLE. The
Artic Circle, which no one has succeeded
III getting into.
SOFT SOAP. III some shape, pleases all
and generally speaking, the more I've you
put into ii the better
EXpERnENrAL philosophy-Asking IA
man to lend you money Moral philoso-
ply Refusing to do it.
You've men who write ON pink note
paper and envelopes run the risk of being
considered efeminate fops.
lF you can't coax fish to bite, try
your persuasive powers on ii cross dog,
and you will be sure to succeed.
A SENTIMENTAL youth says he prefers
hanging on the neck to hanging by the
neck, but that both are dangerous.
DRUGGIST has this cheerful invitation
IN his show window Come i'll and
get twelve cmetics for one shilling.
The merit of our actions consists not i'll
doing extraordinary actions, but i'll doing
ordinary actions extraordinarily we'll
A HOUSE without children is like Ian
tern and no candle, IA vine and no grapes,
n brook with no water g1lrgling in its
= channel
In Paris there is a current saying that
where Il frenchman spends five franc, IN
Englisbman spend twenty, and an Amer
2 lean fifty.
JONES called on the man who restores
G oil paintings, and requested him to try
a 80 restore one stolen from his residence
II year ago
; A ROOM with pictures i'll it and a room
without pictures differ by nearly as much
rs a room with windows and room with
ont windows.
y A WAC. on hearing that Il man had
given up chimney sweeping, expressed
E his surprise, as he thought the business
suited sooted) him.
DIGBY says it is true that there i,
+ more pleasure i'll giving than receiving =
but he also thinks it especially applies to
4 medicines. kicks and advice.
In might do for peacocks to strut about
I the streets and show their fine feathers,
il they would always keep their feet ont
{ of sight and not say anything.
= THERE is nothing so calculated to call
ont the deep earnestness of II true woman
and enlist her most faithful devotion, rs
the doing up OF her back hair.
ApvERsIr1 has ever been conside red as
the state III which man most easily
< becomes acquainted with himself-partic
/, ularly. being free from tlatterers.
II Is great bmnder, in the pursuit OF
happiness not to know when We have
~ hot a IN. l.... .n,atn xyttl
= reasonable and possible amount of il.
f., 4 PAssENGEH on IL railroad was aroused
- from II serene slumber the other night by
u the footing of the whistle, and exclaimed,
q ' The train has caught up with those
II cattle again
Il NEW way tu avoid nn "onpleasant-
N ness. is Ia do rs is done III Utah-to
as marry the grandmother, mother, and
n daughter This avoids the necessity OF
e Il mothei-in-law
Is An Illinois man persisted III smoking
Ie III his stable till IA horse kicked his pipe
% ont of his mouth and the life out of his
N body together The baru and three
Is horses were consumed.
n \ BRUTE OF u bachelor, on being in.
II formed that marriages are made in
10 heaven, sud he wished that prohibi-
- tive duty had prevented their export from,
y the place of their manufacture.
- 4 NEw dance is to- be introduced into
~ society next Winter, which is said tn he
ia something between Highland fling and
.. an Irish jig. 1t will no doubt take well
/ among our fast American youths.
u HAVE you been unfortunate And
IN would you really like to the test the SYM
h. pathy of the friend who has Just been
" giving you the warmest, most cheering
-h words ? Ask him to loan You n dollar.
N THE heart! is the best card in the
81 chance gImo OF atrmony--somctimes
X overcome by diamonds and knaves. often
lis won 10y tricks and occasionally treated IN
" u shuiiling manner aud then cut alto
ne gcther
W. SOMEBODY suggests that the marriage
:" service should now bc changed to read.
We Who dar's take this woman = And
~ the groom can then answer " ! dare
a il he feels courageous enough when the
", crisis comes.
nr Wu,f makes your COWS ~ cross ~ said
,,ll an old lady 10 the milkman, the other
i day Gross, ma'am They nre the
:, gcntlest things IN the world We'll.
4, the milk is always sour" the matron ~.
iii Piled, sharply
ist MARROW MINDED men. who have not q
~ thought beyond the sphere of ti.cir own
outlook. remind one oi the Hindo,
ma vim, III. ANAL a.,a n,tL,u., l,,,