The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1870-12-08
A victim Of the TOOthache.


1 had the toothache yesterday
That Internal little hollow tooth Of
mine held a bushel of ache. 1t ached
clean down to The toe Of my boot il
was a regular o Z ache tool My
face swelled 80 much that my most
familiar creditor didn't know me-
You wouldn't have wanted very much
of my jaw. Every time the tooth
thumpcd, it lifted me clear off my
chair. I really thought I should 60
crazy-you probably think my fare
wouldn't have cost me much--I beg
ged for a revolver to end my moment,
Gus moments.
I remembered of a quart bottle Of
strychnine in the house. I got il
and drank it all didn't even take the
cork out-I sucked It in--and pre-
pared to die. But suddenly discOv-
erred the label had sod Rye" on IL. The
label played the mischief with my
intentions. If it hadn't been for that
label.
laid down on the floor, rolled over
and Immediately got up. A good
many people who were depending on
me--for various sums--hearing of my
danger--or their danger-came in to
tell me what they didn't know was
good for the toOthache, but begged me
TO do something, as they were sure l
was not prepared to 60 yet.
The ladies sympathized with me-
One said she had not had the tooth
ache for many years but she hadn't
a tooth in her head. One old maid
declared she had it in her two front
teeth very badly only the day before;
but know privately, that all her
teeth are false. All the while my
tooth, with the spirit of a hundred
aches, was beating time to the music
of Fishers Hornpipe. I snatehed
the tongs and ran up stairs and
worked for fifteen minutes to pull the
internal tooth, but it wouldn't bulge
an inch.
1 had a notion TO 60 to the dentist,
bat then / got afraid he might pull it.
1t means business to 60 there, but ]
started three or four times, hoping it
would stop aching before got to our
gate, which it didn't. Finally, 1
crammed my hat over my eyes, took
my face in both hands, and started.
I was crazier than / ever was in
my life, and that is saying a good
deal. I met fellow owed aud
paid him Eve dollars-I was SO out Of
my head.
I neared the dentists door.
I nerved myself up-so did the
tooth, and then, with heFoism
worthy Of a better cause, went past
and round home again. I thought of
The river; then l thought of that
young lady who had mistaken me
Tor a single man, and then went back
10 the dentists room.
Shut my eyes and went in.
asked him what he'd give me to
let bin pull the tooth. He said
I told him it was no
aughing matter, and 1 didn't want
my of his gas He told me to sit
ioRn aud enjoy myself, and he'd pull
It any how. begged him to pull
Easy on it; he got his forceps on it.
Then 1 asked him what he'd take to
let me of without pulling the tooth.
BE told me to hold on. held on his
lrm. A second and [ thought my
lead had been a bomb-shell, and had |
oursted. asked the dentist if my
1aekbOne had come up with it, and /
elt Of my face to see if it was all
here.
But the tooth was we'll out.
Il was the first time in bis life he
lad ever made the mistake Of pulling
he right tooth the first trial. Yes,
here on the table lay the little tooth
still aching away! 1t was true to
is instincts. When the dentist asked
ne for his pay, told him to charge
{. was sure 1 had got my right
mind again.
My'ehesk had gone down again,
,ut I hatteF myself I have still
enough left to do business on.