davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

There is lady in Washington who wears
her own fair hair without a elignon, which
fact deserves mention in honor Of the one SEN
sible woman Of the age who does not disfgure
herself with the current vile-wad. No one is
deceived BY these monstrous tumots into 6eliey-
ing any other thing than by their assumption
is indicated a woful lack Of that long hair which
is the glory Of woman in the person wearing
them. They defle collars, they exhale grave
yard savors, and do away with one Of the
pleasantest parts Of a woman's head, next to
her ace-the round, shapely noddle, tbe vit,
Of beauty unadorned. Even The close-shorn
I" poll " Of a bruser is preferable in iudicious
eye to the back. brain Of pretty woman foul
ed up with a mass Of horse.hair, sea-moss, and
dead folks tresses Away with it then, god
ladies. The summer is nigh, aud its beats
may reveal those taints u the chisHon which
the cold of the winter has kept under cbeck.-
N. T. World.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

PARROT STORY" You sec" said the old
darkey, " dis parrot belonged to a baker in
Richmond Now, each baker is allowed to
make certain number Of loayes Of bread
every day and no more; cause il dey does
dey will be seryin' ont stale bread TO DC custo-
mers. Well, dis baker had baked more dan
his usual share per day an bid de surplusum
under de counter. De parrot was bangiu' 10
his cage and seed it all. Bimeby in comes
de inspector and finds dc bread all right, gu
is goin' out again satisfied, when de parrot
cocks his eye at him aud sings cut, Dere's
more bread under de counterp So de nspec-
tor grabs it 'cording TO law and carries it on.
Well, den de baker goes to de parrot, berry
mad, an takes him by dc bead an fotche5
him twitch or two, an filings him in the
gutter for dead, 'lonSside pig just dead OBJ
de measles. Bimeby DC parrot begins to
crawl bout, bis feiders stickin' out an his
head looped on one side, an den stops an
looks at dc pig berry Pitiful an ses Did
you say anything about dc bread?
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

A young lady met in company young gen
tleman who evidently had an excellent opin-
ion Of himself During conversation ho intro
duced the subject Of matrimony, and expatia-
It'd at length upon the kind Of wife be expect
ed to marry, that is, If ever he should take the
decisive step. The honcrcd lady must 10
wealthy, beautiful, accomplished, amiablc,
&C., &c. HIS listener quietly awaited until be
ended, and then completely confounded him by
asking in the coolest possible manner, +" And
pray, sir, what have you to Offer In return
for all this 2" The young man stammered =,
rcddened little. and walked away.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
Boy Love.

One of the queerest and funDyest things to
think of in after life, is boy-loye. Nosooner
docs boy acquire tolerablc stature than lie
begins to imagine himself man, aud to ape
manish ways.
He casts side glances at all the tall girls hemay
meet, becomes a regular attendant at church,
carries a cane, holds his head erect, struts a
little in his walk. Presently and very soon,
he falls in love- yes, falls is the proper word,
because it best indicates his happy deliTious
establishment. Helves now in a fairy region,
somewhat collateral to the world, and yet
blended somehow with it. He perfumes his
hair with fragrant oils, scatters essences over
his handkerchief and desperately shaves and
annoints for a beard He quotes poetry in
which Glove" and do7e," heart and
dart peculiarly predominate; and he
plunges deeper into the delicious labyrinth
,fancies himself filed with the divine affiatus,
and suddenly breaks into scarlet rash-or
rhyme. He feeds upon the looks Of his beloved; /;
is raised to the seventh heaven if she speaks
pleasant word; is betrayed into the most as
tonishing ecstacies by a smile; and is plunged
into gloomiest regions Of misanthropy by a
frowu. He believes himself the most devoted
lover in the world. There never was such
another. There never will be- lie is the one
great idolator wealth he despises the grove
ling thought Poverty, with the adorable be-
loved, he rapturously apostrophizes as the first
of all earthly blessings aud love in cot
tage, with water and crust" is his beau idea
Paradise Of dainty delights.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
VIRGINIA FREE PRESS.
TERMS.

-E-The FREE Pass IS published weekly at TeO
Nsrrr. or9 Fify Cents per annHm IN odrGnee.
ra-THREE DOLLARS IL not paid in advance.
Es- One Dollar 1sd Fifty CeRfs for sac month";
cs-The terms Of advertising are, for square,
zone incl1 or less One Dollar and Fifty Cents for
three insertions-larger ones in the same proper
zion Each continuance Fiffg Cents.
rs-No advertisement 90 be considered by the
month or year unless specified on the Manuscript,
-r previously agreed upon between the parties.
-s~Au advertisement not marked on the copy
or specified number ofinsgrtions viii be continued
until ordc-cdo out and payment ezacted accordingly.
rU-EB5UltE ADvEErisEvENrs.-To avoid any
aisunds-s;sudiug on the part of ihe Annual Adver-
,s.rs it is proper 60 state di'isey that their Pri-
vHece only extends 90 their immediate business
Real Estate Legal and all other advertisements sent
5y them to be an additional charge aad no varia-
tioa.
- Obituary Notices Of more than elines will
becbarEed tor.
JOB WORK--Postcrs. Sale Bills, Circulars,
Cards, DC, executed promptly, neatly and at fair
a-icss.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
MISCELLANEOUS.
Cost of Loaferism.


Does the young man Who persists in being
loafer ever reflect how much less it would
cost to be decent respectable man?
Does heimagne that loaferism is more eco
nolnlcnl than gentility? Anybody can be
Gentlemen, if be chooses to be, without much
cost, but it is mighty expensive being loaier.
1t costs time in the first place--days, weeks,
months, of it-in fact about all the time he
has for no man can be frst-class loafer With
out devoting nearly his entire time to it
The occupation, well-folowed, hardly affords
time for eating, sleeping, drive had almost
said drinking, but on reflection, we will except
that. The loafer finds time to drink, whenever
invited.
1t costs friends. Once fully embarked on
the sea Of loaferism, and you bid farewell to
every friendly sail that floats under an honest
aud legitimate 1ag.. Your consorts will only
be the buccaneers Of society. 1t costs money;
for though the loafer may not earn cent, or
have one for months, the time lost might have
produced him money if devoted in industry
instead Of soth. 1t costs health, vigor, COM
fort-all the true pleasures of living; honor,
dignity, solf-respect, and the respect of the
world when living, and, finally, all regret or
consideration when dead. Be gentleman,
then it is far cheaper
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

THE DAEcE.-What a strange thing, says
the NOrduidn, this dancing is, after all, when
you look at it from philosophical. or if you
please, unsophisticated point Of view. The
other day 1nsulanus asked lady how it came
to pass that the entrance upon tho floor Of
ballroom made such a wonderful change IN
her usual manners and habits. She asked
him what he meant, as she did not understand
He asked her: "Suppose introduce to you
a friend of mine, stranger and he would
not only take your hand, but put bis arm
around you, what would you do?7 You
may imagine her look and answer. What
would she 10? All our lady readers know
what they would do, and what the father, hus-
band and brother Of such a lady would do
" But, said IDsulanus, as soon as you eater
the room Of hop or ball, you permit per-
feet stranger, who is introduced to you at the
time not only to take your hand, but to put
his arm around your waist, and 20 sail around
the room with you in the sildy mazcs Of the
dance, and yonr father brother and husband
think it is all right"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

HIGH.-During the recent senatorial contest
at Carson City, Nevada, tho rates charged for
lodgings were, according to the Virginia In
tpprise: For a bed in d house, barn,
blacksmith's shop or bay yard none to bc
had, all having been engaged shortly before
electiou) horse blanket in old sugar hogshead.
per night, $40; crockery crate. with straw,
$3.50; without straw, So for cellar door.
"a: for roosting Oh a smooth pole, $3.50;
pole, common, rough, SO plaza fence, s., 90
walking up and down the Warm Spring road,
if cloudy, $3.50; If clear, Sl,25, roosting
places in pine trees back Of Camp Nyc, 6
bits"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

Coop ADvIcE-A preacher of the coIored
Methodist Church has been giving his brethren
some good adTioe. lie hopes never to see them
90 to the polls as he has seen some Of the pre-
ferred color 90, drunk, swearing and lighting
bu. sober, decent and orderly. " Let US, he
ezclaims with almost politicians shrewdness,
"let Us not allow any demagogue to slip the
moose around our necks and lead Us to the polls
Let US be independent voters. Let Us so act
that our revilers will say, as the disciples said
to Christ on the Mount, at the TRANSPORTATION
Lord, il is good for Us to be here.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
Attempted Elopement.


Twoinfants in Nashville lately loved. They
were about tho ages OF Paul and Virginia, the
girl fourteen and the boy year or two older
He was bashful youth, still equal to the pretty
speeches which win the heart Of budding wo-
manhood. The girls mother was the only OBJ
stacle in tho way of happiness, and the youth
could not face this lioness in his path, therefore
an elopement was agreed upon. The mother
and daughter were about to start for the dis
tant wilds of Omaha. The youth was, in an
uuderbaud way, on hand at the depot, and as
the train started of the maiden merely left the
mother minute and stepped of into the arms
of her lover as it were. But alas the course
Of true love is apt to run rough, as the poet did
not quite say-though he might with much
propriety have done so. The mother took the
next train back, ut the next station, and search
was instituted for the couple who eloped by
staying at home. They were found anxiously
awaiting the arrival Of clergyman, license,
and friend, but misery and the mother came
first. The girl was given to her parent and
the boy to the police, and early the next morn
ing new start was made for Omaha by The
mother aud daughter.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

A HAPPY WoMAY.-A happy woman Is
she not the very sparkle end sunshine Of life
A woman who Is happy because she cannot
help it-whose smile even the coolest sprinkle
Of misfortune cannot dampen. Men make a
terrible mistake when they marry for beauty,
for talent, or style. Tho sweetest wives arc
those who possess the magic secret Of being
contentod under any circumstances. Rich or
poor, high or low, II makes no difference; tho
bright little fountain Of joy bubbles up just as
musical in their hearts.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

EsrERPErsISG.-An enterprising undertaken
IN Illinois, sent the following excessively cool
note to sick man: " Dear sir, having positive
proof that you are rapidly approaching deaths
gate, therefore thought Il not imprudent to
call your attention to the enclosed advertise
ment of my abundant stock Of readymado
coffins, aud desire 10 make the suggestion that
you signify to your friends wish for the pur-
chase Of your burial outf. at my establish
ment.'
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

There is good story told Of the night editor
Of an Irish newspaper, who, being left without
any assistance in busy time, found himself
unable to cope with all the intelligence that
flowed in upon him, 80 that toward o'clock
in the morning be wound up bis nights wor',
by penning the following eXtraoTdiary notice
Owing 20 a most unusual pressure Of matter
we are compelled to leave several Of our col
umDs blank"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
4 matchmaker in Meriden. Conn, has on

4 matchmaker in Meiien, Conn, has on
exhibition in bis shop an old watch, With only
an hour hand and common calgut fora wind
ing chain. It has brass case, but wa' origi-
naly enclosed in huge tortoise shell. Tic
inscription on the watch is W. Lee, No. .,
1858 making It 2l2 years old, undoubtedly
the Oldest running watch in America. Itkeeps
excellent ,rne, not varying two minutes
week.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
POETRY
CLING TO THOSE WHO CLING TO
YOU.

There are many friends of summer,
Who are kind while flowers bloom;
But when winter. ehills the blossoms,
They depart with the perfume.
On the broad highway Of action,
Friends Of worth are far and few:
So when one has proved his friendship,
Cling to him who clings to you.
Do not harshly judge your neighbor,
Do not deem his life untrue,
If ne makes no great pretensions-
Deeds are great thorgh words are few.
Those who stand amid the tempest,
Firm as when the skies are blue,
Will be friends while life endureth;
Cling to those who cling to you.
When you see worthy brother,
Butfeting the stormy main,
Lend helping hand fraternal,
Till he reach the shore again.
Don't desert the old and tried friend,
When misfortunes come in view,
For he needs friendships comforts;
Cling TO those who cling 70 you.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

The Louisville Journal has this consola-
tory" reflection: To the parent whose son
dies in infancy there must be something pecu-
lierl7 soothing in th. thought that, no matter
what may be the fate of the child in the next
world, il can never become member Of base
hall club IL this
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

An Indiana widow and widower, with
number Of children each, got married lately.
They lived happily together, and aPPea'ei 70
epioy themselves until they sat down to tie
FIRST meal. When the man asked blessing,
andincluded bis own children but no: bis 0iies,
the lady balanceda bowl OF hot soup On his
head. and he is now eoaxing new head Of
hair % grow.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

At dinner party where Charles Dickens
was present, young writer was inveighing
against the world Ia very forciblc, fecbc
manner" During pause 10 this philippe
against the human race, Dickens said across
the table in the most self eongratulatory Of
Of tones: Il say, what lucky thing 1t
is you and don't belong to it. ltremInd'
me-" continued the author Of Pickwck, "of
two men, who on raised scafold were await
ing the fual delicate attention Of the hangman
the notice Of one was aroused by observing
that bull had got into the crowd Of specta-
tors, aud was busly engaged 10 tossing one
here aud another there; whereupou he said to
the other, say, Bill, hOlc lucky il is for as
that pe are up herei
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

A celebrated preacher, in sermon upon tie
duty Of wives, said: I" / eein this coDgrega-
ton woman who has been guilty Of disobe-
disuce to her husband, and in order to point
her out will fling my Bibel at her head" J"
He lifted bis beck, and every wiie's bead in
s.an.Iy ducked.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

To make horse ea. medicine 10 hs'g grain,
take some Of the medicine in the hand and rub
the horses nose with Ii before you allow him
10 smell Of the grain lie smells the medicine
all the time and csnno. tell whether /. sin the
grain or not.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

The Jealous man Is always hunting for some
thing he doesn't expect to End, md after he
has found it he Il mall because he has. lie l'
always happy just 10 Y'apor;.6n shs > NJ
.r,tle
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
PIANOS

II y L
~ t5s different Fairs held iR The South, IN
Octo5e. and Nors@bcr, 1869,
For the Best Pianos over Eight different Ne"
YORK. Philadelphia and Baltimore, Pianos
Oyr,-r AND New WAsERooN No. NORTH
LIsga1Y ST., BALTIMORE, MD.
ctT1rrF,S PIANOS have all the latest improve
- merts. including the AGRAFFE IktbLE'
I~orv Fronts. and the Improved French Aouon'
f,,l1,. warranted for Fire Years.
Secondhand Pianos and Parlor and Church sI- UT
ran, of my own make, always on hand from 80
9e,r-.e.vho have our Pianos in use -
Cen. r. E. Lee. Lexington, Virginia zen
Robt Ransom. Wilmington, y. C.. Gen; d. H.
i'm Charlotte. y. C. Governor John Letcher'
Lsyinrton. Virginia. B. F. Harrison warren
EbN 7,bn r Packet, John Burns, Andrew Al
49, CbarIes Lansdon. Thos. c. Lsckland' pr
CoCJsIi Wm. G.. Butler, Thos. \. lsbell, OF Jeler-
son County. .. -oo -,,,,. ,-s ,,e--
-. ~ ~. Soptb who have bought the Stie1 Piano
since N, close Of the War. 49,,
TERMS LIBERAL. A call IS soleitea'
December 3, lS6S-ly.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

THE undersigned, late proprietor Of the Maltny
House. has the pleasure Of announcing TO hls
friends, and the public generally that he has sleased
the above Hotel for a term Of years, and proposes
making it
4 First Glass House.
This Hotel being convenient 20 the Baltimore
and Ohio Railroad Depot, and also other business
portions Of the ctv, will be- found desirable a.
anv other Hotel In the city for business men.
The House has been thoroughly renovated and
refuruished throughout, aud hope by strict per
sonal attention to business TO add to the comfort
of all those who may favor me with their patron
age.
a number OF wears. feel confident of meeting all
expectations the travelling public, and all others
Very Respectfully,
Oct. o. ls69-ly. \. B. MILLER.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
UNIVERSITY OFPENNSYLVAYIA

can be relied on as a very fine Tonic, and peculiar
~ adapted to
GENERAL DEBILITY, LOSS OFAPPETiTE
Byspsp ia. FIc'D'cncc, Torpid Lirsr, jawdice
ferer and Ay,e, and Chronic affections.
Tl.y improre Digestion, correct Bijary Derunge-
utee', and yire tone to the entire system.
", have room for only few certificates, from
some %. our most prominent citizens, to which we
respectfully ask yeur attention. See what our
Doctors. LAWYERS, Diyiues and Merchants think
and say Of them:
For Fercr aad Agec, Bilious F,rer, and other Fe-
briis Disco.es.
Read below the Certificate of Dr. J. L. Warfed.
an eminent Physician in Frederick and Carroll
Counties. Maryland:
WESTMINSTER. MD.. Sept. C, 1865.
Gentlemen: This is 10 certify, that have used
.' Bogg,' German Tonic BiHers in my practice
for the last two or three wears, with much Sausiac
tion aud look upou the preparation as a safe and
valuable Tonic. regard il as particularly suited
% eases of disease occurring in maarious districts
of country and especially such as require the en-
plovmcnt of TONES after other appropriate treat
mcnt. J. L. WAKEFIELD, NJ. d.
Fsr Debility Dy,ppsio aud DiarrhoeG.
BALTIMORE, November 10, 1864.
Gentlemen: was lately cured OF Fever and Ague
BY the use or small quantity Of" BoJgs' German
Tonic Puierv" also recommend their use in ca
". 4. FISHER,
Attorney at Law. No. 43 st. Paul street, BALTIC.
For Dyspep'ia and General Debility.
Read the Certificate of Rev. r. J. Keeling, Rector
Of Trinity C. p. E. Church, Washington City:
WASHINGTON. August %, ls65.
Gentlemen: have been induced 70 try your
German Tonic Biitcrs" in my family, for the re-
liefof Dgspepsio and GcTerdl Debility. have NJ
hesitation IN Recommending them as the bestl have
met with. Your - Birers" possess the desirable
properties Of a corrective stimulant, without the
Objectionable alcoholic taste noticeable IN other
preparations Of the kind. One member OF my
family has received almost permanent relief from
Ckronic DyYspsid from the use of this medicine.
Very respectfully yonIs;
K. J. KEELING,
Rector Trinity lP E. Church, Washington City.
Enquire Of your Grocer or Druggist, or OF the
Proprietors at their Laboratory,
No. ) NoRrH LIBERTY SrREEr,
BALTIMORE, MD,
WADE. BOYKIN e. CO.,
Wholesale Druggist'.
For Sale hv
AISQUITH L WASHINGTON, c6arl..torn.
W. : MASON S,........................
c. Z. BELLER HdrPeT's feTry'
And by Druggists and GrOcers generally.
February 7, lS70-6m.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25
D. j. D.
Bo''s' BALTINoRE B B BIT7ERS'

BOGGS' GERMAN TONIC BITTERS are daily
growing in favor. We would especially call the
attention of Grocers. Liquor Dealers and Druggists
to them. As they are made of the purest liquors,
being favored with vegetable tonics and made un-
der the direct supervision of regular
an-Aas 80 lGEDGozasE
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1870-04-25

GES. EARLY on WEEPtNa MES.-The
Hudson, New York, Gaze,ts, under the haai-
ing" "a Renaissance Of the REBELLION gives :
dialogue which occurred between surgeon
aud General Early, near stanntOu, during
the Valley campaign OF 1854
Surgcon:-" General, when see woman
weep my sympathies are at cnce enlisted, bn.
my griefisi a measure mololatei by the knowl-
edge that she can weep at any time; but ST..
when seca man she'd itesrs--a minupon whom
all the gods have set seal TO give assurance
Of man, it arouses every pathema;ic scnsi-
bility of my emotional nature to an immediate
communion with his grief, as reflect what
must be the volcanic turbulence OF his bosom
to irdndate his visage with such lava Of
tears"
Gen. Early: "Well, Doctor, when see
snch man as You have described, with sil
the front Of Jove, and all that sort Of thing,
cry, always put him down for . d--n fool.
Roars Of laughter followed.
Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1870-10-19
BROWNE & Browne, 3l5 Second st. A.

The SEA Moss FARlYE COMPANY, SO
Park Place. New York, who are manu-
featuring enormous quantities of this
cheap nutrient under patent obtained
last summer, have wisely introduced it
without any flourish of trumpets. being
assured, we suppose, that it would take
its true place in the dietary without any
Fictitious aid. They have, howe yer, set
forth the nature and uses of the article,
in neat little pamphlet, accompanying
each package, and which we advise
everybody, and especially every wife and
mother as well as every young lady
who has, or expects to have the charge
of q household, to read, mark, learn, and
inwardly digest.
The wealthy and prosperous proprie-
tors of the patent have little to say
They simply invite attention to their
New Article of Food, and then pre-
sent the scientific and other credentials
upon which its claims to the acceptance
of the public we're originally founded.
Its reputation already, however, rests
upon broader basis, via the approval
of the community, TO whom 1t was first
offered not more than twelve months
ago. cod