The Plymouth Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1869-1941, 1870-05-26
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS

For A WEDDING SoNG-Love-knot.
CoURT-PLAsTERs- for dam
ages.
THE keynote of good breeding is B
natural.
To MAKE \ VENETIAN BLIND-Put out
his eyes.
To BE LET-SOme young swells faces.
They are generally vacant.
A MAN ever ready to scrape an acquain-
tance-The barber.
SHOW this to your wife, A never fail
ing cure for sulks"-Silks.
CAN a curl over the forehead be called,
Locke on the Understanding
WHEN man gets so low that he will
even borrow trouble, his case is desperate.
THE husband who deYoured his wife
with kisses found afterwards that she dis
agreed with him.
Do unto Others as they would like to do
TO YOU" is Punclinello's golden rule for
Wall street
THoUGH men boast Of holding the reins,
the women generally tell them which way
| they must drive.
WHY was Robinson Crusoes man Fri
day like a rooster? Because he scratched
| for himself and crew-sO
WAsHERwoMEN are great Travellers
They are continually crossing the lines
and running from pole to pole.
I'm sitting on the style Mary" as
the fellow said when he ruthlessly sat
| down on his sweetheartS new bonnet.
MANY man grumbles because il costs
as much per day for ice for his whole
family as he pays for single drink Tor
himself
WIDOW holding policy on her de-
ceased husband in the Washington, gets
the money herself. 1t cannot be taken for
his debts.
THE cat that serenaded literary lady
the other night has not been able to be
out since and the lady is minus one
boot, one flower pot, patent inkStand
and new chlgnon.
A BALTIMORE paper says that young
lady was recently discharged from one o.
the aigest pickle factories in that city
because she was so sweet that she took
the acid out of al the vinegar.
THE author of novel, just out, wish
ing to saw that her heroine opened hel
mouth, thus expresses herself: The
pretty coral doorkeepers of her worl
gave way, and a low hooking laugh RAJ
out from them"
allow did you spend Good Friday-il
modification, as required = said ON
Frenchman to his friend. "Yes," reptile,
tie latter, with a sigh, 81 remained d
home with ray wifi the whole day"
THAT was bat q eft handed recommen
datiOn given by Western paper in recon-
mending IA candidate for office, that during
; the war his friend had received wound
enough to kill any ordinary mule"
| iT is said that one United States Ser
" congratulated another Senator VIII
] just concluded one of his great effort.
thus "a great specialize best speech
ever heard delivered by man who kne,
: so little about his subject"
4 NKw ORLEANS paper, in speaking c
a thunder storm which lately swept owe
that city, says: " Several persons wer
, struck by the lightning, and in one in
stance woman was killed. The house
: and vessels, however, did not fare s
we'll"
, Glow many feet long was the snake !?
asked IA person of a traveller who had jus
related story of the encounter of a bo
killed by him. zone hundred and ninety
two inches, was the reply; snakes hay
no. feet
: "MA," said little boy, has auntie 20
bees in her MOUTH" "No, my dear; W h
do you askg' "Cauee Captain Jonf
caught hold Of her, and said he was gDin
, to take honey from her lips, and she SAFE
"Well, make haste"
: TIE EyOta C1inn) Adrertiser mentions
farmer who is SO particular with the cult
= Il
: bugs run and hide when they hear hin
coming" Possibly other farmers may dt
| rive hint from the circumstance.
:, QUITE OUT or DATE.-Isabel- "Bu
} grandma, dear, she's not a b
pretty, looks very stupid, and hash
a shilling. What can ne be gOir
to marry her fors" Grandma
well, my dear, You'll think it OF
IS Ofmy Old-iashioned notions -but perhal
It it is for love"
y MIR BEECHER tells us Of class in h
II mission school which was offered a ba
/ ner for good behavior. One youngest
Is made some kind of disturbance one Su
Il day before school, when the rest took bi
5 out and punched him till he promised
3 reforml hat class got the banner.
a SHRKwD Italian courier, who W
=. accompanying his master on his WeddlI
!. tour, observed him carrying to the ca
risge a bonnet-boX belonging to his ia
. partner He stopped hin at once al
.. said, with empressemeHt, Monsieur W
!, pardon me, but bonnetboX now, bonnie
~ y box always"
90 4 BUFFOON at the court Of Francis
,r complained 10 the King that great 10
y threatened to murder him for utteril
=. some joke about him. "Ii he does" sa
p. Francis, Z" he shall be hanged in fl
? minutes after" 81 wish" replied Il
complainant, "your majesty would har
10 him five minutes before"
r A GOOD story is told of young m;
le who applied to a certain hotel for d stu
Ut ton. The landlord informed him tn
is there was but one place vacant, that
" lamp-cleaner. The qucstiOner accept
N the situation, observing that he won
re ike something as remuner4tive as pos
I'd bic, as he was once clerk, spoke fo
1t languages tluently, etc. "Oh, that's
le no consequence" said the unappreciati
ut landlord; "this business won't requi
I'd you To speak but one language, a
IN mighty little of that
IN - -
~ Make Home Pleasant.