Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1870-01-06
Humorous HjisaaI5E::--

Fine Cardiff Giant il,tgr55
Boston mark is completed. '''' 'ha
"A WORTHY old sali re,no,..
tsthe sounding brass" ssAny y5t-."inE O. 1
remarked, fought to know ~ ,'-'' be
is the think to take soundiaes VIII, ice e i7a'
-Thiers was asked Il be "a
much next session; be sa;I. G,s sp7zE
all" "Not all z" And wiv 90, t'oi ?,
you should never make r,;.. Ie.asuss
chamber of a sick man" 70 The
The Osceola iowa Sentinel -.
tice of marriage In that pl.r5 =, - : nc, 4
the bride :>'-She is merry. t..,,s 80. - o.
level-headed, truthful little sDgsi , ,--o'
featured expressly for the chap Win ,'', ~.
herr g0
a photographer in Massaohasets,
recently visited by young woman W. 1s
WIN sweet simplicity asked "How IL
S uoes ~ .ake to get photograph after vos
leave your measure ~ ei SOa
"A Louisville aarkev NJ 49,.
assembled all his descendar,. siesl age
generation last week for an GA ~ tootth
"candy pull" Unfortunately cs.l.s
questions of legitimacy arose. and ON
his grandchildren was arrested for sbo,4
ing one of his great-grandchildren ~
again one of his great-grandehI5rs
uncles was put in the ststion-bouss s,
shooting his cousins youngest daugbf.-
while many Of his descendants of mis-
laneous denominations We're locked an 4,
disorderly conduct.
Patrick saw a bull paving in H.
field, and thought how amusing it WoTIs
be to jump over, catch him by the bo,,.
and rub his nose in the dirt. Tn. a.
was SO funny that he lay down -:
laughed to think of il. The mora !,
thought of it the funnier il seemed. an:
he determined to do il. Boyus 0n;cLl-
tossed him over the fence again. San
what bruised. Patrick leisarelv DicEs:
picked himself up, with the consulate,
reflection: "Wen, it is a mighty fax
thing I had my augh foorst."
"A Frenchman said to an American
"T'ere is Won word in your language I 4.
not comprehend, and all re time hear +
Tattletoo, tattletoo-yat you means b,
tattletoo % The American insisted tba
no such word exists in English. Will
he was saying so, his servant came ont r
put coal on the fire, when he said. "Tbgrs
John, that'n do" The Frenchman jumps.
up, exclaiming, "Iare, tattletoo, You s.,
him yourself, sare; vat means tattletoo
A Massachusetts, country newgpaps
tells the following incident Of a BosiC
topper: Going into the bar-room, he caIIec
for something to drink, but was told tina
no liquor was sold, but that he Nigh
have glass for nothing, if be would bur
a cracker for twelve cents VerT
well" said the Yankee, baud down YOU,
decanter" This was accordingly don
and strong draught taken, when, AZ &.
was about departing, the landlord hsna
ed down box of crackers, asked if b
didn't want one. "Well, no, guers net
said. the customer ''yOu'll sell EN- 10 de-
I can get lots on 'em five or six Tor a cs1
anywhere"
The n. Y. Commercial Advertizs
says: With his spectacles resting calm
upon the bridge of his venerabls and Gle
sic nose; without cloud upon his
lished Parian brow; with a copy
Roemer's French Idioms" tucked una
his left arm, and volume OF Fasquel
First lessons in French" spread open b
fore him, the Hon. Horace Greeley sat
the Academy of Music last night, gu
undisturbed by the storm of enrhusia
that ragged about him. and tried To folio
Pere Hyacinthe through the puzZliI
Iabyrfuths of the Gallo dialect. We neye
before felt so deeply the PrOpriety Of IL
appellation of "Philosopher" which b.
been applied to this great man.
The people of Berlin have gained Il
reputation of the wittiest of Germans
writer in the Vossian brings togsths
some examples of wit Of pure Berlin Pr
duction, occurring in the returns of L
last census in the Prussisn capital. T.
following characteristic items were foul
written under the heading of ''Calli-
or Occupation" on the census charts:
A lamplighter apparently afflicted vii
a national love of titles, wrote under th1
head that he reioiced in the fact of BEN.
"North German lamphghter." Anotbs-
jack of all trades, said, II do everything
for j, myself, an 3 man" ARothg
entered himself as practical .physiolg
gist," while another Is "being Educate.
for missionary service among the heather.
An Austrian named "Illusionist" as b.
calling, while another had entered hin
self as ''realist," and with this felt hin
self so much Prussian that, hurt by being
asked, belonging to what other State
answered with the words :-"EEcuse ne
true Prnssian !" Another appears lohaTe
had the idea that mans occupation eK
lists only as long as be is actively engaged
for he says he is "tailor, but now, on &C.
count of lack of work, dO-nothing.
A poor widow, born in 1871, told IL
simple story in trembling voice with IL
two words, earn nothing" Under IL
head of religion there are some curlC-'
expressions. One gives his religion s.
"Gottesthum," which may probable D.
best translated as "Diyinianity y an1thE
says as follows: by the illustrious olsrgl
expelled from the State church, becsus
the husband was previously divorce:
from Catholic, the souls of both husband
and wife, however, remain true 10 th'
evangelical faith, for over this mat'si III
clergy have no power"