The Fremont weekly journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County, Ohio) 1867-1877, 1870-09-09


Cicero frequently said that political
economy was the grandest consum-
nation that the human mind was
capable of consuming: ard even
our own Greeley has said vaguely
but forcibly that
Here the lightning-rod man sent
up another call for me. l went
down in a state of mind bordering
on impatience. He said that he
would rather have died than inter /
rupt me, but when he was employed I
to do q job, and that job was expee- |
ted to be done in a clean, workman
like manner, and when it was finish |
ed and fatigue urged him to seek /
the rest and recreation he stood SO
much in need of, and he was about
to do it, but looking up and saw at
glance that all the calculations
had been a little out, and if a thun
derstorm were to come up and that
house which he felt a personal inter
est in stood there with nothing on
earth to protect it but sixteen
| lightniug-rods-aLet US have peace"
| | shrieked Put mp a hundred and
| fifty. Put some on the kitchen
! Put dozen on the barn! Put Il
couple on the cow!-put one on the
cook scatter them ali over the per
secuted place till it looks like
zinc-plated, spiral-twisted, silver
mounted cane-brake! Novel Use
up all the material you can get your
hands on, and when you run out OF
lightning-rods put up ram-rods, cam
rods, stair-rods, piston-rods-GHy-
thing that will pander to your dis
NAL appetite for artificial scenery
and bring respite to my raging brain
and healing to my lacerated SOUL"
Wholly unmoved-further than to
smile sweetly-this iron being sim
ply turned back his wristbands dain-
tily and said he would now proceed
to hump himself" Well, al that
was nearly three hours ago. 1t is
questionable whether ] am calm en-
ough to write on the noble theme of
political economy, but ! cannot re-
sist the desire to fry, for it is the
one subject that is nearest to my
heart and dearest to my brain of all
this worlds philosophy. Political
economy IS heavens best boon to
man" When the loose but gifted
Byron lay in his Venitian exile, he
observed that if it could be granted
him to 90 back and live his misspent
life over again, he would give his
lucid and unintoxicated intervals to
the composition, not of frivolous
rhymes, but of essays upon political
economy. Washington loved this
exquisite science; such names as
Baker. Beckwith, Judson, Smith,
are imperishably linked with it; and
even the imperial Homer, in the
ninth book of the "Iliad," he said:
Fiat iustitia, ruat coelum,
Post mortum Unum, anti belium,
HE jacet hoe, ex-parte res,
HOli icum e-cononllco est.
The grandeur of these conceptions
of the old poet, together with the fe-
licity of the wording which clothes
them and the sublimity of the imag |
ery whereby they are illustrated, |
have singled out the stanza and
made it more celebrated than any |
that ever
TeNow, not word out of you
not single word. Just state your
bill and relapse into impenetrable |
silence for ever and ever on these
premises. Nine hundred dollars
Is that all? This check for the |
amount will be honored at any res
pectable bank in America. What is |
that multitude of people gathered |
in the street for? How?-looking |
at the lightning rodsp Bless my |
life, did they never see any light |
ning-rods beforeP Never saw such |
a stack Of them on one establish
ment, did 1 understand you to say? |
1 will step down and critically ob-
serve this popular ebullition Of ig-
norance']
THREE DAYS LATTER.-We are all |
about worn out. For four-and twen-
ty hours our bristling premises we're
the talk and wonder of the town.
The theaters languished, for the hap
piest scenic inventions were tame |
and common place compared with |
my hghtning-rods. Our streets
were blocked night and day with |
spectators, and among them were
many who came from the country |
to see. 1t was a blessed relief, on |
the second day, when a thunder
storm came up and the lightning
began to "go for" my house as the
historian Josephus quantity phrases
it. 1t cleared the galleries, so to
speak. In five minutes there was
not a spectator within five miles of
my place; but all the high houses
abou. that distance away were full,
windows, roof and all. And well
they might be, for all the falling
stars, and Fourth of July fireworks
of a generation put together and
rained down simultaneously out of
heaven in one brilliant shower upon
one helpless roof, would not have
any advantage of the pyrotechnic
display that was making my house
so magnifcently conspicuous in the
general gloom of the storm. By ac-
tual count the lightning struck at
my establishment seven hundred
and sixty-four times in forty min
utes, but tripped on one of those
faithful rods every time and slid
down the spiral twist and shot into
the earth before it probably had
time to be surprised at the way the
thing was done. And through all
that bombardmento only one patch Of
slate was ripped up, and that was
for asingle instant the rods
in the vicinity were transporting all
the lightning they could possibly |
Well, nothing was
ever seen like it since the world be-
can. For one whole day and night
not member of my family stuck
his head out of the window but he
got the hair snatched off it as
smooth as a billiard ball. and if the
reader will believe me not one of us
ever dreamt ofstirring abroad. But
at last the awful siege came to an
end because there was absolutely no
more electricity left il the clouds