North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1870-06-15
The Woman Who Linsers.

The Woman Who Lingers.
She stands on the corner with o squad
Of female friends, and smiles At the car
driver, at the same time signaling him
with her parasol. As soon as he begins
to slacken his pace, she opens out into
conversation with her friends. The car
stops and the conductor waits. She
glances around at him, steps down from
tho curb-stone and branches off into
fresh lot of talk. The conductor looks
mad. He requests her to hurry up. She
rushes at the car, seizes the iron hand rail
to make sure that she has got that car all
safe and certain, and then she determines
that she will have her talk out
or perish on the fagstones then and
there. She has more last words than the
Indian chief who refused to die and 90 to
the happy hunting grounds until he had
said the ten commandments and the Con-
stitution of the United States, including
the Fifthteenth Amendment, backwards
three times, in his native tongue. She
holds on to that rail grimly, plants one
foot on step and yells out
"Give my love to Maria Tell Arabella
she owes me q call Don't forget to
bring William Henry and the children up
to tea on Tuesday night! and tell Aunt
Sarah I'd have that bombazine dyed black
and trimmed with bugles!''
Conductor looks like man whe would
commit unjusti6able homicide upon slight
provocation. In wrath he pulls the bell:
the woman mounts the steps, smiles at her
friends, waves her parasol at them when
she has sailed up the street about hun
dred yards she calls out
"Be sure to tell Arabella and don't
let Georgia suck the yellow paint off his
mouth organ!'
When she is seated the conductor waits
awhile, and then he asks for her fare.
She feels in her pocket. Goood gracious I
she hopes she has not lost her pursei
She dives into her satchel; it isn't therei
Perhapt the tickets are under her glove;
she removes it slowly but they can't be
found She rifles her pocket again, and
isds the purse there after all. Conductor
looks as Indignantly melancholy as an
undertaken at funeral at which there are
orly four carriages and yellow pine
coffin. The woman unfolds bundle Of
notes, slowly; but as she doesn't find the
bundle she wants, she puts them all back,
and hunts around in her satchel for Eve
minutes for ten cent note. Conductor
gives her three cents and goes out on the
platform, where he tears his hair, kicks
small newsboy off the steps; and tells his
sorrowful tale to passenger who is smok-
ing cigar.
Meanwhile the woman has found an &C
quaintance, to whom she is talking 40
briskly as if this was the first chance she
had had since last summer. She wants
to get out at Twentieth street. Conductor
stops the car but the woman, half rising,
continues her remarks to her acquaintance.
Conductor says, "Please hurry up,
madam' and she jumps to her feet,
shakes hands with her friend, saying:
"Oh, forget to ask after john" John
is well, but the woman thinks it necessary
to offer some extended sanitary suggestions
in reference to Johns health, and to de-
clare that she will be abjectly miserable
unless Mary Jane brings the twins up to
spend the day. More objurgations on the
part of the degraded oatcast on the back
platform. The woman at last starts for
she misses her purse. She goes back into
the car to look for it, moves all the passen-
gers, overturns all the hay, at last finds
the purse in her pocket. says, "Good bye,
come up and see me-" again to her friends,
and gets out. Conductor rattles volley
of imprecations down the street after her,
pulls the strap savagely, and transfers
twenty five cents worth OF fares from his
business pocket into his own private ex-
chequer as balm to soothe his lacerated
feelings.
The crown-princess Of Prussia went the
other day to the store of the court jewell
er in Berlin in order to purchase a dia.