davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17
ADVERTISING RATES.

Transient advertisements per Square of ten
lines or less frs; insertion, So each subsequent
insertion, ST.
Larger advertisements inserted the nezt
ihcral terms
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17
u. "a. EeaaEsOT~.
Eiltabidol & Co.,

EAEALEKS IN GROCERIES AND PRO
Z } visions Wpnd aud Willow War, Confee-
ti"nery. Tobacco, Cigars, Pipes. Notions etc
Main street. adjoining the Express Office, Aibanv.
Oregon
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17
e. a. Freeiand,

EAEALER IN EVERY DESCRIPTION OF
School, Miscellaneous and Blank Books
Stationery, Gold and Steel Pens, Ink ETC. POST
"fh@e Building, Albany, Oregon Books ordered
from New York and San Francisco.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17
- L, 9OO,oOc-

Their business i mana aCei fv underwriters VIII"
have no superiors and hut few equals III the Union
Their risks small carefully selected and seat
tered throughout the entire United. States. thus
avoiding heavy loss in the most serious conhaEra-
ton. Their rates are not nf the guess gamb
ling order but are based actual experience.
and as low good insurance can he furnished
Their insses are honorahiy and promptly ad-
iustcd and paid in gold coin without delay or
discount. Their agents. located at all points Of
Importance, have authority to issue policies direct
thus avoiding the danger and delay incident
the sub agency system and in each aud cry
particular, both regards solvency. 1,erintnency.
prudent gcInent honorable conduct qiiiable
rates and conservative practices,
The Phsrnix, Of Hartford,
furnishes facilities to the nsurng public unequali
ed by any ether Company doing business on this
coast
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17

A mantle. shelf-a lady's shoulders.
The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-09-17
Ul1e Albanp Register,
rrHLTsHrp EVERY SATURDAY BY
COLL. VAN CEEVE.

orr'en o. CORNER OF FERRY Asp rrrsr-sr
The New York herald., 1870-09-18
EDWARD SCHENCK, AuCTIONEER
IA Saleeroom 60 Liberty street.
Elegant Household Furniture,

at No. North Washington square.
BY EDWARD sCHENCK, tomorrow, 18th instant
at halt past O'Clock, above, all the Furni-
ture OF said house. Rosewood Piano by CHECKER
ing, Mirrors, elegant Carpets &C., foiows--Ele
rosewood Parlor Suits green and gold satin dam
ask rosewood black walnut Etagcres Card and Centre
Tables Encognures, French Plate Mirrors and Cornces
Lace and Damask Curtains, elegant French Clocks and
Bronzes Flower Stands Velvet and Brussels Carpets
good black walnut and rosewood Bedroom Suits,
Armore.a -Glsce, Lour ges, Faueus Curled Hair Mat
tresses Feather Bosters and Pillows black walnut Buffet.
China and Glassware Dining Chairs Hall stand and Chairs
Velvet stair Carpets and Rods; Library Furniture, OIL
cloths, large quantity Of Kitchen Furniture, with which
the sale will commence. The above be examined on
Saturday.
LNXECUTOR'S SALE.-COLE h MURPHY WILL SELL
IL at auction, Tuesday September 90 at 1Op o'clock
the ID and full size Billiard Tables and oher
Furniture In the billiard saloon 263 Washington street.,
Brooklyn, formerly kept by the late John Ferguson
TTrNRy pREgER 4 HopsoN. AUCTIoYEERs, NO. 10
Bowery.Monday, Sept H. At ii o'ciock ~ 10 west
Houston street, the Furniture OF family ana tne entre
stock and FtxtWaa Of CAndx StQyN PArtGuAu tomorrow
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

VNANTED-FOR CASH. A PLACE OP FIVE OR MORE
within hour OF the city must be good bar.
gain Address box l4l Herald oince.
VVANTED TO PURCHAsE-A HOUSE AND LOT IN
w Harlem, in good location. Address, with full descrip
ton aud lowest price, HENRY KING CO., 2l3 Broadway
G10 000 TO $1,000 CASH WILL BE PAID FOR
plO.OOO House in "A good locality up town prin
cpas privately dealt With Address II. s., box 2lU Post
Office
The New York herald., 1870-09-18
nEpARrMENr OF PUBLIC WORKS

IMPAIRMENT PUBLIC WORKS.
u BENZ. 7. FAIRCHILD, Auctoneer, by order OF Hon.
William NJ. Tweed, Commissioner of Public Works, will be
sold public auction, Friday September 23 1870 10
O'Clock NJ at the vesbule of the City Hail. in the city
of New York. all Buildings and Parts of Buildings
by the Commissioners OF Estimate and Assessment ap
pointed by the Supreme Court for the extension OF Lexng
ton from Seventy hrst street to Ninety seventh
street. In the city of New York which buildings and parts
of buildings laid down certain file in the
Office Of the Department OF Public Works, No 237 Broad
For further particulars apply at the Office OF the
tioneer, No. Beach street.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

rTO RENT-A LARGE RECTIFYING ESTABLISHMENT
In Jersey City, convenient to ferry three Copper Stills
70 Rectifyng Tubs everything in perfect running
s. IRELAND, 2Ul Broadway.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18
HERALD SUNDAY SEPTEMBER s ls7o-TBPLE SHEET
REAL ESTATE WANTED.

HOUSES WANTED-HOUSES wANTED-PARTIFs
desiring their houses will please leave mar
tcuIars with ROBERT T. MEEKs, Real Estate once, 50
Cedar street
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A SPLENDID HOUSE FOR SALE OR TO LET, FUR
IA nshed, unfurnshed all the modern improvements
class atom two from city cars, 20 minutes
from Jersey City Jerry "a Prospect avenue, near Bergen
WQQ4 Ayepv, -
The New York herald., 1870-09-18
SAILS AT AUCTION.

A Lien b. MINER, AUCTIoNRER
n BY ALLEN Il. MINER BROTHER,
Successorsto
HENRY IA. LEEDS a MINER.
Salesrooms Nos SO Chambers "a Resde street.
Art Galleries, Nos SIT and Sl9 Broadway.
COMPREHENSIVE NOTICE.
The arm Of HENRY ii. LEEDS MINER established
e47 having been dissolved BY the death OF Mr. Henry H.
Leeds and by limitation, the business will be continued
Allen B. Miner surviving partner who has associated With
hm his brother, Henry d. Miner, under the nrm
ALLEN u. MINER BROTHER.
ALLEN B. MINER
HENRY ID. MINER.
Ans l.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

UNFINISHED HOUSE wANTED-oN THE HUDSON,
New Haven or Harlem road, one hour from city; must
have modern improvements with stable coachhousc for
family Of four adults. Address, with paculAS aRd price.
box 33Y6 H0st oNcS.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

DUBLIC SALE OF REAL ESTATE OF CHRIS
tan Goteib Gent andJacobine Gent on Thursday, Sep.
ember g. 1870 at O'Clock r. n win be offered for sae al
August Meyers grocery and provision sore Fordham near
Belmont valuable Lot OF Land lying In the town OF Wesg
Farms the county OF Westchester New Tho said
lot contains fst class building lots and s advan-
gate Qneha Of the purchase money may remain :esnEed
MAYER, AGENT or r. s. WOODRUFF, Attorney, Trentons
sw jersey.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A GOOD PIECE OF TENEMENT PROPERTY WANTED
n at $4,000 TO 100000 for cash custonerPaies 'hay
ing such will please send full particulars to DINGEE
KETCHUM CO., g. Cedar street.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

FURNISHED HOUSE wANTED--A FIRST CLASS
IL fully furnished west side Immediately Address stating
price and full particulars HOWARD, boz 3g14 Post oce
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A Lien B. MINER, AUCTIONEER
N BY ALLEN 3. MINER BROTHER,
HENRY H. LEEDS L MINER
(Establishsd 1Sl7N
salesooms Nos 95 Chambers and n Reade Gale
ries SIT and 6l9 Broadway.
On FRIDAY SEPT. 90, at lO5S O'Clock,
at their saiesrooms u Chambers Streets
q largo and nhe assortment OF elegant
PARLOk, DINING ROOM, LfARARY and BEDROOM
FURNITURE,
Mirrors, Carpets Chandeliers Mattresses Bedding Iron
Safcs Bronzes Clocks Mante Ornaments, &C., &C., the
contents of class residence for convenience
OF sale
Full particulars hereafter.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

offered, beautiful Houses with from TO 100 acres.
Terms easy Great bargains. Some onchaf real value
WILLIAM N. POOLEY % Dey street.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A Lien b. MINER, AUCTIONEER
n BY ALLEN B. MINER 4 BROTHER,
late
HENRY H. LEEDS 4 MINER
(Estabished l847(,
saesrooms Nos IS Chambers and n Reade Streets Gal
leries 617 and 619 Broadway.
On WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 81,
at O'clock at saesroom No 9b Chambers street. the
Copyright and Chrome Lthograph Stones with the draw
ings on them Of the well known and favorte picture
"LOVES MELANCHOLY" :"
BY CONSTANT MAYER.
The be No. lsb Sixth avenue, top foor
previous to sale.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A SPLENDID CHANCE TO SECURE A HOMESTEAD
day, September e. 1870, at O'Clock, the premises n
Building Lots. being portion of the DsMott estate located
Montgomery avenue, Corlandt street, DeMott street,
Bergenwood road Pateraon Plank road
and Hague street In Jersey CITY and West Hoboken This
stuaed high ground and commands view of the coun
try for miles In every direction. The streets already
opened and paid and the place be reached
by steam the Northern j. Railroad well by
horse from all parts of Hudson county Cars will be
waiting At the Hoboken ferry to parties to and from
the sale free of charge Terms and made the
day Of sale.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

A RTIsTs SALE-OIL PAINTINGS, BY CATALOGUE.
n PHILLIP LEVY, Auctioneer,
will sell at auction, Monday and Tuesday, September 10
and 90 saesroom 50 Nassau street. commencing at II
choice collection of Paintings, by eminent European
and American artists Sale peremptory.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18
PROPERTY OUT OF THE CITY FOR SALE
OR TO RENT.

LII WANTING FARMs.-a0O0 ACRES. GOOD SOIL
a a mild climate; miles south Of Phadephis price only
more rapidly aan any other place in the United
land, N. J.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

II ENTUCKY BLUE GRASS LAND.-10,ooO ACRES IN
n exchange for property New York city, Apply
to NEW YORK SOUTHERN LAND COMPANY, So Broad
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

DAwNBROKER's sALE-ON TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER
20, by JOHN MORTIMER, II East Broadway, large
.orfaent Of Fall and Winter goods Dresses Remnants
Quilts large lot of Over Coats Business Coats Pants vests
and other articles too TO mention. By
| order Of SOLOMON'S, l73 Spring street.
The New York herald., 1870-09-18

DAwNBROKERs' SALES, BY r. FIELD, AUCTION
eer. lbs Chatham areet.Monday, Women's Clothing.
by order A. 1856 Varick street; Tuesday Watches
and Jewelry by order Of r. simpson Co., Bowery We'd
nesday, Womens Clothing, by order VIM. Wilson
Co.. Isl Bowery; Thursday Mems and women's Clothing.
by order Simpson somers Co.. 2 Chatham streets FrldRys
Mems and Women's Clothing by order j. Srankels No
atre
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07

A WARNING TO HUSBANDS.

The great want of women at pres
ent is money-money for their per-
sonal wants, and money to carry out
their plans. / propose that they
shall earn it, that they shall consider
it as honorable to work for money as
for board, end | demand for them
equal pay for equal work. / de-
mand that the bearing and rearing
of children, the most exacting OF
employments, and involving the
most terrible risks, shall be the best
paid work in the world, and hus-
bands shall treat their wives with as
much consideration, and acknowl-
edge them entitled to as muoh mon
ely as wet nurses,
The meaning of this is, that wives
are about to strike for greenbacks !;
SO much for every baby born. No
greenbacks, no more sons and daugh-
tiers. No greenbacks, no more pop
ulation; 40 more boys to carry on
the great Enterprise of the age. The
scale of prices Tor maternal dulles ia
~ follows; Girl babies, 800; boy
babies, $500; twin babies, $500;
twins (both boys), $500, triplets
$500; tripiets lali boys), 81, 900.
Terms: q. o. ID. No credit be-
yond first child, the motto being
''Pay up or dry up" Husbands
who desire to transmit their names
TO posterity will please notice and
take new departwe.-Revolution.
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
VARIETY OF CROPS.

One Of the greatest evils in any ag-
ricultural community or State is tn e
tendency to raise a particular crop to
the exclusion of others. illustrations
of this fact are not hard to tind.-
Wheat brought remuneratiye prices
and the farmers of many of these
Western States devoted almost their
entire available land TO wheat cultul e
and as natural result the price OF
wheat fell TO an unremuneratlve fig
ure. Again the mania for hop rals
ing seized our Wisconsin farmers !;
the crop paid prodigiously for year
or two, and then, between the hop
louise and low prices, they lost in
1868 large portion of what they had
made in the previous year.
Now the beet sugar mania prevails.
Although there is undoubtedly mon
ely in it, yet the farmers, and more
particularly the sugar mill owners
will do well to tread lightly lest it be
overdone. The making OF beet sugar
requires heavy outlay for machin-
cry, which should DE taken in ac-
count 10 estimating the profits. Like
every other enterprise, it will finally
be overdone. Still another mania
has seized Wisconsin farmers, viz !:
the manufacture of cheese, and while
we are glad to see this valuable home
industry prospecting, and would like
TO hear OF half dozen cheese factor
les in Brown county, yet we would
much prefer to hear that the farmers
had turned their attention to half a
dozen new crops.
To sum the matter up ; the safest
plan for 4 farmer to pursue is to Lave
a variety Of crops. Then ifthe wheat
market is dull, perhaps his potatoes,
his hay, the products Of his dairy, his
flax or hemp, or his wool, or all Of
them, will be in great demand at
high prices, while his unfortunate
neighbor, who has planted nothing
but wheat for the market, comes out
in the fall shorn OF the profits of his
season labor.
Another disadvantage OF adherlng
to one particular crop Is that it inn
poveriShes the land. The chief chem.
zeal constituents OF one crop enter
but lightly into another, and it is un.
wise 10 drain from the land one par
ticu!ar element, when by variety and
rotation of the proper fertilizers, the
quality of the land may be maintain
ed.
The rule we have laid down here
for farming is equally applicable to
other branches OF business. That city
or community whose industries are
the most varied is the safest IN a COM
mercial crisis. Ifnothing but shingles
is manufactured, when the price of
shingles falls there is no relief from
a stagna,ion Of business. But per-
haps at the same time the iron mar
ket is good, or the market for wood
en- ware, or leather, and many other
commodities, Now if all these in
terests received their proper share Of
attention, the depression in the shin
gle trade would scarcely be felt by
the community at large. We hope
that our own citizens will keep these
facts in view and profit by them
Green Bay AdvOcate.
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
ORCHARD CULTURE.

Select piece of ground in which
jou can pasture the hogs, with water
or convenient to water. PJow and
cultivate the orchard carefully, SOW.
ing DO grain or grass in it until the
trees are large enough to bear; then
seed to clover and pasture with
hogs. Never NOW the orchard, ex.
cept to cut the weeds off. Never
pillow the orchard after mid summer
for that gives the trees fall growth,
and mak,s them too tender for win,
ter.
Lay off the orchard in square rows,
about 25 feet apart. Plow it in lands
of this width, in the direction SO
that the water will run off, leaving
the center furrow open. Set the
row in the ridge Of the back burrows.
Set the trees six inches deeper than
than they stood in the nursery, lean
ing little to the Southwest, TO pro.
tect them from the hot sun.
Plow the ground very deep before
setting the trees. This is very i'm
portant, both in dry and wet seas
ons. And for the growth of the
trees at all times. If you have no
subsoil pillow, put four horses to a
deep tiller, and put it in as deep as
the pillow will bear. 1t is better that
this deep blowing should be done in
the fall, but do 1t.
As the trees get older, pillow up the
grass in May or June, and continue
to pillow it at this time for three or
four years /; and if the soil is very
thin on poor ridges, good coat of
manure will be cry necessary. Trees
must be nursed to make them pro.
duce large and fair fruit. Take as
good care of your trees as you do
your animals. --Suet Fosters Cdta
tOque.
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07

No humbug. tits warranted To lost
impaired Tdste. smell or Hearing, watering or
or Mouth pain and pre- --urr in IN" head. and loss
" Nom nv when cause J. all of them trpqu Drly
,r. nv rhc rava-,rs ofc rrh. Isis pleasant IN
nninIrss to use contains no strong poisonous or
rItic drugs but cures by lis mild soothing ac
ton.
FOm SALE BY MOST DRU iGISTS EVERY
WHERE ice only -
fyOur Druggist ha- not yet got IT, on sale. don't
,e u II off with some wore man worth rs strong
.rnf .'fumigator. or p0isDUOu- cauErc solution,
Nhch ~ i'll drive the disease 10 The lungs instead
Oh curing II, out send sky Cents 10 and the
remedy will reacn you ny return mail. Four pack
ages, post pald, S2,UO, one dozen for IS co.
Send a two cent stamp for DIR. Sage's pamphlet
on catarrh. Address the proHrietOrs.
RV. PIERCE. NJ. ..
BUFFALO, n. \.
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
THE OSKALOOSA HERALD.
Thursday, July 7, 1870.
1T Is DRINKING.

1T is DRINKING.
II isn't the texes and rates, John:
II isn't the taxes and rates
Which makes YOU poorand your children wan
And your wife a s!attern to look upon
1t isn't the taxes aud rates.
II isn't the chambers shop, John;
1t isn't the price OF cad
Which keeps your cupbnards so scanty and bare
And feeds the children on such poor fare
II isn't the price of bread.
1t isn't the children's bread. John
II lent their clothe. and food.
Which max the rent so badly behind,
And worry the landlord however kind;
1t isn't the clothes and food.
1t isn't the doctors bill, John;
1t isn't the doctors bill
Which wears out the coat, and bares the feet,
And opexs the roofto the rain and sIeet;
1t isn't the doctors bill.
1t isn't your low wages, John;
1t isn't that your wages are low
That tears the blanket from baby's bed,
Or tears the bonnet from mothers head;
1t isn't that the wages are low.
It's the spirits and beer. John:
It's all the spirits and beer;
For the devil is with you and blinds your eyes,
Asmorning and night his work he plies,
And drags you TO ruin by beer.
And so you go right heavily, John;
Right heavily on to hell
And your wife, she starves. and your children
sin,
And your eyes get red, and your cheeks get
thin,
And so you run on your road to hell
And still you drink on, John;
And get still deeper into woe;
And rates, and taxes, and bread and meat,
And clothes for the back, and shoes for the
feet,
To the publican's house they go.
And the publcan's fine parlor, John;
Is furnished so snug by You;
And his wife is dressed, and his children fec,
And his doctor paid and his meat, and his
bread
And all by such az you
You were once man and free, John;
You were once man and free;
You are now a slave, for you cannot save,
And your owners the publican, big and
brave,
And he won't set you free.
YOu once looked like a Christian. John;
You once came often to church.
But now you go, Ike a heather sOt,
To the DEVILS own house. where God is not,
And never come near the church.
And once you thought o. Heaven, John,
Ofthe rest of The happy dead;
But now your heavens the pub'ican's room,
And there you forget the awful doom
That awaits the drunken dead.
And so if you still drink on. John,
Youl die drunkard still
AID your publican owner wont weep for his slave
And the parish will give you drunkard'f
grave:
And they'll call you 1.-The drlnkard" still.
Aud then your wife and children, John
They'll come to sin and shame
And they'll never mourn that the drunkard il
gone,
For surely they'll wish that they'd never been
born,
so sed will be their shame.
And o! your sinful spirit, John
VIII your soul be happy abOveF
Nay-flthy now, will be filthy then.
And the drunkard nO~, will be slave again.
Lost lost 10 joys above
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
A merchants clerk went i

A merchants clerk went into a
printing Office short time since, and
seeing pile of papers lying on the
table Git being the day Of publica-
tion), unceremoniousIy helped him.
self to copy, and uttered the fol-
lowing to the printers devil, 81
'spose you don't take any pay for
just one paper p "Not always" re-
piled the devil. Shortly ate wards
the devil entered he store where the
clerk belonged, and called for a
pound of raisins, which was quickly
weighed out to him by the clerk.
The devil took the raisins, saying,
81 spose you don't charge anything
when a fellow don't take but q
pound 2" "No, 'said the clerk, after
seeing the disadvantage under which
he was placed by his own stingy,
impudent liberality towards the pen.
niless printers devil, and looking
daggers at the imp, Indignantly
cried, /" JVhen Iget any more nevs-
pop1rs from a printer IN pay for
'ena Z"
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
Gen. Meios protested AGAINST

reduction of a force of 900 useless
mules owned by the government, aud
Secretary Belknap responded with
an emphatic order for the sale Of
5000 of the animals as soon as pos
sib1e-with slight hint that the
Quartermaster's Department OF the
army isn't the Government by good
deal. The old army officers despise
Belknap because he despises circum-
locution and red tape.
The weekly Oskaloosa herald. [volume] (Oskaloosa, Iowa) 1855-1885, 1870-07-07
CHE OSKALOOSA HERALD.
Thursday, July Z, 1910.

HUMOROUS.
Big relatives-Gl-ants.
Die house-A hospital.
A single flea bachelor.
Sharp food-A sword fish.
A lay fgure-The price of eggs.
A paradise for artists-Pencil-va-
MIA.
Fare-w well performances-Good
meals.
Pills for occulists and teachers
Pupils.
The time that tries mems soles-
Winter.
A suit for damages-Any clothes
in storm.
The needlewoman's exclamation
-"Ahem ~
The weight of English life-The
pound sterling.
Serpents on the hearth-Eels on
the gridiron.
Suitable food for estranged lovers
Cold meets.
Atwo-foot rule-Keep your feet off
the cushion.
What color is it that contains sew.
eral ?-An lumber "a number.
When is a young lady like preach
er-When she has her hair in a net.
Age is venerable in man, and would
be in woman-if ever she became
old.
Professors of symmetry-Women
who instruct their sisters in the art
of padding.
What is that which p man may
have never possessed and yet leave
behind him "A will.
If pretty woman asks you what
you will bet, answer her that you will
lay your head on hers.
Why is the stomachache like a
celebrated English poet ?-because
its an ache inside (Akenside.)
What is that we eat and drink at
festive times, though it is sometimes
woman and sometimes man "A
toast.
An urchin being rebuked for wear
ing out his stockings at the toes, re-
Piled that it couldn't be helped
''toes wiggled and heels didn't"
What is the difference between a
maiden Of sixteen and a maiden OF
sixty ? One is careless and happy,
and the other is hairless and cappy.
Why does servant going up We,
suvius present one OF the greatest
phenomena in nature ? Because the
valley (valeO ascends the mountain.
Hood once said that there was a
family living near him that had a
mile of daughters the name of the
family was Furlong, and tAere were
eight OF them.
Every body knows what "acrostic''
means but amateur poets do not
know what across stick an editor can
be when he has TO read bushels OF
such nonsense.
absence makes the heart, etc.
"Dear me, how heartily tired am l OF
this mourning" observed fashion
able lady to her maid. by the by,
Jane, who am | in mourAing for -
Isabel.-"But, grandma, dear,
she's not a bit pretty, looks very
stupid, and hasn't shilling. What
can he be going TO marry her for ?''
Grandma.-"Well, my dear, you
will think it one OF my old fashioned
notions-but perhaps it is for love"
An advocate having lately gained
suit Tor poor young lady, who
was ugly, che remarked 81 have
nothing TO pay you with, sir, but my
heart" "lland it over to my clerk,
if you please; | wish no fee for my
SELF he replied.
A "Bridget," who, as. usual, enter
tains an exalted opinion of the good
things of the old country, was asked
by her mistress if they had any pies
where she formerly lived in Ireland.
Yes, and sure they had" "What
kind Of pies?" "Magpies, mum. !"