The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1870-11-19
The Josh Billings Papers.
RAMRODs.

RAMRODS.
The higher we git, the more We
are watched-the rooster on the
top ov the church-steeple is ov
more importance, altho' he is thin,
than two roosters in barn yard.
If men are honest they will tell
you that their success in life IL
more ov a wonder tew them than it
il to you.
Take all the pride out ov this
world, and mankind would be like
. bob-tailed peakok, anxious to
hide under somebody's barn.
think the heft ov people take
az much cumfert in Dragging ov
their misfortunes az they do ov
|, their good LUX.
+; Call a man o thief, and yu Ii
: cense him tew steal.
!: A sekret ceases tew be q sekret
I it liz once confided-it liz like a
dollar bill, once broken, itiz never
q dollar agin
All fights, tew produce emmy
moral advantage. should end in
viktory tew one side or the other.
/; Yu will alwus see dorgs renew a
drawn battle every time they meet.
/ There il CRATE difference be-
tween holding a hi offs, or having
hi offs hold us.
& II man liz full ov himself, don't
tap him, but rather plug him up
and let him choke tew deth or bust.
Laws are not made out ov JUS
tiss, they are made out ov neces-
sity
The man who kant find emmy
virtew in the human heart, hes
probably givin Us q faithful sinop-
sis ov his own.
!: / don't think that Fortune has
got emmy favourites, she was born
blind, and motifs them who win
the oftenest, go it blind, too.
1t il safer thing emmy time, to
follow q mans advice than his ex-
ample
The heart is wife ov the head,
and we (who have tried it). all
kno how purswasiv the wife is
espeshily when she wants sum-
thing.
I konsider weak man more
dangerous than O malishus one,
4. malishus men hav sum karacter,
but weak ones don't have emmy.
hav notised one thing, that the
most virtewous and diskreet folks
we have among us are thoze who
ihav either no pashuns at all, or
very tame ones-it il q grste deal
eazier tew be good dove than q
decent sarpcnt.
The man who takes a dollar il q
thief, but il he steals q milyun he
IL q genius.
Virtew haz no pride in it, nor
sin any humility.
Owls are grave, not on account
Of their wisdum but on account of
their gravity.
He who duz q good thing Sc
+ kretly, steals q march on heaven.
Hunting after health is like hun
ting after fleas, the more you hunt
them, the more the flea.
Take the selfishness out Of this
world and thYre would be moro
happiness than we should kno what
to do with.
When q man gets so reduced
that he cant help anybody else,
then We vote him a pension for the
| rest ov his days, by calling him a
poor devil.
Thare seems to be an afekta-
shun in every thing; even sin has
I its imposters.
It is fact (known TO us doktors
that yu kan ketch the little pox ov
o man before it brakes out on him
eazier than yu kan after it haz
brok out Tis thus with wicked
ness; the openly SO are less dan
gerous than those who have it un-
der the skin.
When we arermore anxious tew
pleaze than to be pleazed. then we
are in love in good earnest.
IT. man liz happy, he kan afford
to be poor and neglected..
Thare il nothing We brag ov
more than our honesty. and we all
ov US kno that our honesty il q,
mulch the effekt ov interest a.
principle.
I: don't show good judgment K
| be surprized at emmy thing in thi'