Bristol news. [volume] (Bristol, Va. & Tenn.) 1867-189?, 1870-02-18

ana tnat each should be considered at
liberty. The lady went out to India ]
as speculation, and dropped into u
good thing. The gentleman stuck
with pertinacity to his curacy, and re-
mained on the same spot for the whole
twenty years. Then, after such long
parting, they at last met again, in this
accidental way, in the great "show'.
park. She was a widow, with an only
child, rich, and was handsome still.
Walking slowly beneath the swinging
chestnut boughs, they discussed old
friends, old times. And then the par
son said that he proposed TO forget
those past twenty years, to erase them,
as If they had never been, and to revert
once more to the old days of their en-
gagement. And the lady said, in mild
phrases meaning much, that she had
no objection. And the long engage
ment revived in the form of very |
short one.
1t may he said that we are looking |
upon the subject in an empiric way,
citingppposite instances and not lay
down principle. IL would be easy to
make a wide-sweeping generalization
| If we could only see our way to it,
But the subject must be taken In cases,
and the cases must be decided on their
merits. 1t is a subject for that noble
science of casuistry, which, once dill
| gently pursued both by Romanist and
Puritan, seems now relegated into the
region of ethical curiosities. The only
general consent on the subject is that
adopted by mothers, who look upon
4 long engagements with an ill-disguis-
ed aversion and when they take you
into their confidence and tell you how
| o1. .ur,,1 anx-iottc thaxy ora a hnttt fbair
girls, and enlarge on that dispiriting
hopelessness, which Is kind of shadow
to long engagements, it Is difficult not
to sympathize with their troubles and
be persuaded by their rhetoric. a
great deal of satire lis often lavished
upon worldly mothers. But in this
so-called wOrldliness good mothers are
; often unworldly and unselfish. They
only want to know for certain what
Is really for the true good of their girls,
, and they will be sure to do it.
There is generally a considerable
amount of poetic interest about a
young engaged pair. But in long
engagement they frequently discount
their raptures at "a long date and with
a heavy sacrifice. Among friends and
: : in the'family the smile of interest at
the outset is exchanged for the smile
, of pity in the issue. y girl feels irri-
= tated and indignant when she knows
!, that she is pitied. There is often some
X amount of affectatiOn about an engaged
= girl, which issometimes amusing, and
. sometimes absurd. She Is apt to re-
y tire. like a stricken deer, to some lone
: lv glade in the dTawing-room, where
, she considers general society as mere
= intrusion, and all men, except the
: "obiect,u as mere nonentities.. She
will exemplify that selfishness which
= i'm nine cases out of ten belongs to love.
> Her own home will have for her "a sub
= ordinate and decreasing interest. She
u will lose the fresh love of nature and
Ithe keenness of her zest for study
4 Her mind will be oviously unsettled
Her girlhood scenes vanished, and 4
premature womanhoOd sets in.
If there Is any constitutional weak
ness in her system now is the time t
n look out for its manifestation. Yor
D. will detect a cough, u hectic flush, {
ii weakness in the back, what Mr. Ro
Is bertson in his "Schoopp calls "a float
Il ing. or a fainting, or a sinking, or
- swimming" Perhaps a marriage /
e, patched up, when the young peopl,
lr are not whit better prepared to MARI,
n, than they were years ago, and perhap
CT with disturbing feeling that some o
& the best years of life have been unwise
s. ly spent in n long delaw that has moth
~ ing TO show for itself.
u There Is no doubt but a wise mothe
~ | will seek to take daughter from sucl
pe an eminently unsatisfactory condition
= of affairs. She is not to be though
~ ~ hard and worldly, it, with aprescien
II eve. she detects possible ENHANCEMENT
= and strategically guards against them
et She has well-gronnded aversion an
~ objection to the impecunious detr
~ mental. If the mischief Is really don
20 we advise her TO make the best {
10 things. We are by no means certain
~, , even If we put ourselves into q yer
ny hard and worldly attitude, that th
20 rough-and-ready method of getting ri
on of an injudicious engagement by I'll
is simple process of breaking 1t on
really the best. The principle is thi
If girls cannot form long engagement
ne without upsetting themselves in tn
~ sort of way, so far as possible the
ought TO be kept from forming Ion
!, engaaements. The demurrer will
ny ne that the young lady who bears this $
esi of circumstances so i'll must be pal
le colorless, thin, unsubstantial characte
R The rejoinder is that young ladies, O
~ though we will not apply to them SUE
la' uneivil adjectives, DO, as a rule, be
=, ea illthe trial of long engagements. Pc
Dn- hans they would also bear i'll the trio
m 'man of wifehood and motherhood, especil
ly i'm a chronic state of impecuniosit
~ q 1t may be allowed, Also that there a
,nd fsome bright elastic natures, on who
@ ,rt a long engagement has a positively !
M M',i vigorating effect. The bodysof exec
~ tions which they furnish Indicates {
IL extreme difficulty of laying down al
~ general law on the subject,
zed If we might venture to- frame &c
nil ! eralization of any sort; we should $
ged that such am unsettling effect on {
adv lady, has frequently settling effect
The the man. 1t makes and keeps h
din simple, and stehdy, and earnest.
ode the lover Is worth having, the low
nlp one would almost think, would
iner worth waiting for. The mother
ges course saws that the long engagemC
an affords such a hazard that IL will
,ble broken off, and her daughter, af
NV wasting her best years and best fe
ms ings may be Tilted. Perhaps, howev
Ing- Il Is an inaccurate use of language
aod- say that what is earliest Is best. i
oth- The Argument merely cuts in diff
rher ent way also, that it may often say
a girl from an unworthy maria
al There is certainly constant possiu
hers ~ of break Off when the betrot
al Is not, as in Germany, a solemn cl
ami- mony of the highest publicity.
M There are certain people to whom
was engagement OF marriage would be a
.ient gether forbidden II some sanction "
thSr not given to the long engagement
that curate In the church, the Lieutenant
srns the army, the clerk in the bank, 81
AZ amiable, domestic, well educated, W
man manered. young people would m
st. Z such satisiaS.oIy nueoais Is ,sii,i - "
,iveh that vulgar eiellient oa hisry ta, rue'V
onT lsteu IN sun ioieS' ,.l.Id 81,
Yer should make such n difference
long Immortal souis p"S 'nv1 MY ~ so \,