Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1870-02-10

IRISH BULLS.
The Taurine Tendency in Writing and
apekiRg.

The Taurine Tendency in Writing and
speking.
Ono kind of involuntary wit has been
nsturalized by the Irish. 1t did not
originate with the nation, nor is it pc
culiar to it, A good proportion of the
stores noted in the Astela of Hierocles,
written nearly three thousand years
ago, are excellent specimens of the Irish
bull; and it may be found in poetry and
history and speeches, as we'll as in every
day conversation, all the world over
The reckless and rollicking temper
ament of the Irishman, however, asserts
itselfin the use of language as in every
thing else, and renders him unacceptable
to queer and incongruous use of words.
That unconscious and perennial fresh
ness that belongs TO nearly every thing
from the Emerald Isle seems to pertain
also to the Irish bull. We are never
tired OF reading anecdotes of Sir Boyle
Roche, who may perhaps, without mis-
construction, be called the father of
Bulls, to whom the world is indebted for
some Of the finest recorded specimens
of this particular species of witticism-
specimens so eXquisitely perfect, that
they were carefully prepared.
If that had been true, they might
perhaps have been claesed as a new figure
Of speech, or might even have claimed
recognition as the catachresis, that be-
ing trope of so bold a description that
necessity makes it borrow and employ
any expression or term contrary to the
thing it means to express" That il a
tolerably good description Of an Irish
bull, As an example of catachresis,
Webster quotes: i
"Her voice was but the shadow o. sound,
Now, the shadow of a sound, though
it may be a pleasant suggestion to the
fancy. is quite as impossible a thing as
the ''cowid oven" in which Bridget sup
posed ice cream to be- baked, or the
cheers with which New York report
er stated that the Prince of Wales, on
his journey up the Hudson, was greeted
by the pupils Of the. Deaf and Dumb
Institution.
Most Of Sir Bsyle's sayings have be-
come household words; but il may not
be unpleasant to the reader to hear two
or three Of them. It was he who gave
utterance to the profound aphorism,
"Single misfortunes never come alone,
and the greatest Of all possible misfor-
tunes is generally followed by a much
greater" "Sir." said he one day in the
Irish House Of Commons, "I do not see
why we should put ourselves out of the
way to serve posterity. What has pos
terity done for us?p He was interrupted
by burst of laughter, and proceeded to
explain himself "By posterity, Mr..
Speaker" said he, II do not mean our
ancestors, but those who are to come
Immediately after them" In these
times of short measures, perhaps we
should find nothing absurd in the bill
which he introduced, providing that
every quart bottle should hold a quart.
We seem to need something like that at
the present day. 1t was he who rebuk-
ed the shoemaker. from whom he had
ordered shoes for his gouty limbs. II
told you to make one longer than the
other" said he; land, instead of that
you have madeone shorter than the 9TH
er; the exact opposite" During the
troublous times that came upon the coun
try, there was great insecurity of life,
and in letter to friend from his coun-
he wrote: you may judge
this with pistol in each hand and a
sword in the other" His penmanship
must have been rather poor, with his
hands so full.
It was in this same irish House of
Commons that bill was introduced to
cause the watchmen to sleep in the day.
time, in order that they might be more
at night. A report of the de-
bate said that the mover was left in a
great minority. But this was not nearly
so bad as The act which may be found
in chapter 415 Of the Session Laws of
the State of New York for 1853, provid-
ing that every convict in our state pris-
ions may, by obedience and gooi be-
havior, earn Communication or diminu-
ton OF the term OF his sentence
of two days for every six months,
and closing with this language. PRO
viriing, however, that the provisions of
this act shall not affect the case of any
person who shall be under sentence of
fOrthe tern, of his natural
tJe." Itwould be difficult to see how it
would affect the case of such person,
even without this els use. The Penn
sylvania Legislature, it is said once pass
ed an act providing that the State House
yard should be surrounded by brick
wall, and remain an open Enclosure for
ever.n f>e .-
There must be something very subtle
in such . blunder as that perpetrated OH
the statute 5ooks of New York. 1t was
a law to which much attention was call
ed, for it was the first attempt in legis-
lation to give o prisoner chance to
his sentence in some degree by
good behavior. Ii was re doubt drawn
up by an able man, and it passed the
)rdeal of the Governor, the committee,
md of the full Houses of both Assembly
sud Senate. -r --. .--.
Probably very few casually reading
he following sentence in an account OF
IN Irish duel, would detect the mon
,trous proposition embodied in it: "Sir
Richard received slight wound in the
,reast; his antagonist fired in the air,
md so the affair terminated" But the
here is that one party in a
luel might wound the other by firing in
he air. ~
Generally, however, bulls of Irish ex-
ractien are more apparent. It was at
he dinner of an Irish association that
he following sublime toast was given:
Here is to the President of the society i
Patrick O'Rafferty; and may he live to |
at the chickens that scratches over his
rave.
1t was an Isishmap that wrote to his |
on in the "ould counti.ry:" Come to |
Ameriky, Mike. 'Tis fine counthry |
o get a'living in. All ye have to do is
O get three-cornered box, and fill it |
With bricks, and carry it till the top of
three story building, and the man at |
he top does all the work" 1t was an
'ther Of the same nationality who, hear |
ng that ilis widowed mother had mar |
led again, since he quilted Ireland, |
"Murther! l hope she won't |
lavs son Oulder than me; if she does, !
shall lose the whole estate"
Singularly confused ideas must the
on of Erin have of death, fer 1t is re-
ported of one who was reprieved the day !
,efore that appointed for his execution,
md wished to get rid of his wife, that
he wrote to her, II was hung yesterday
md died like hero. Do as | did, and |
year il like q man;N and Of another,