The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1870-12-16


He was filed wi tn CONSERVATION, be.
cause he knew from his reading that
boys who went sailing on Sunday inva-
riably got drowned. So he ran out on
a raft to warn them, hut log turned
with him and slid him into the river.
A man got him out pretty soon, and
the doctor pumped the water out of
him and gave him fresh start with
his elbows, but he caught cold and lay
sick nine weeks. But the most unac-
countable thing about it was that the
bad boys in the boat had good time
all day, and then reached home alive
and well, in the most surprising man
ner. Jacob Blivens said there was
nothing like these things In the books.
He was perfectly dumbfounded.
When he got well he was a little dis.
couraged, but he resolved to keep on
trying, anyhow. He knew that so far
his experience wouldn't do TO go in a
bnok, but he hadn't yet reached the al
lotted term of life for good little boys,
and he hoped to be able to make rec.
ord yet, IL he could hold on until his
time was fully up. If everything else
failed, he had his dying speech to fall
back on.
He examined his authorities, and
found that it was now time to go to sea
as a cabin boy. He called on a ship
captain and made his application, and
when the captain asked for his recon-
mendation he proudly drew out tract
and pointed to the words: ITO Jacob
Blivens, from his afrectionate teacher"
But the captain was coarse, vulgar
man, and he said, ooh, that be blowed;
that wasn't any proof that he knew
how to wash dishes or handle a slush
bucket, and he guessed he didn't want
him." This was altogether the most
extraordinary thing that had ever hap
pened to Jacob in all his life. A com.
pliment from teacher, on tract, had
never failed to move the tenderest emo.
tions of ship captains and open the way
to all offices of honor and profit in their
gift-it never had In any book that ev-
er he had read. He could hardly be-
lieve his senses.
This boy always had hard time of
it. Nothing ever came out according
to the authorities with him AT last,
one day. when he was around hunting
up bad little boys to admonish, he
found lot of them In the old iron
foundry fixing mp little Joke on four
teen or fifteen dogs, which they had
tied together in long procession and
were going to ornament with empty
nitro-glycerine cans made fast to their
tails. Jacobs heart was touched. He sat
down on one OF those cans-for he nev
er minded grease when duty was before
| him-and he took hold of the foremost
dog by the collar, and turned his repro
wing eye upon wicked Tom Jones. But
just mt that moment Alderman Newell
ter, full of wrath stepped in. All the
bad boys ran away; hut Jacob Blivens
rose in conscious innocence, and began
one of those stately little Sunday school
bnol; speeches, which always commence
with, "Oh, sir !" in dead opposition to
the fact that no boy good or bad ever
starts remark with "Oh, sir - But
the Alderman never waited to hear the
rest. He took Jacob Blivens by the
ear, and turned him around, and hit
him whack in the rear with the flat
of his hand and in an instant that
good little boy shot out through the
roof and scared away towards the sun,
with the fragments of those fifteen dogs
stringing after him like the tail Of 2
kite. And there wasn't sign of that
Alderman or that old iron foundry left
on the face of the earth and as for
young Jacob Blivens, he never got q
chance to make his last dying speech
after all his trouble fixing it up, unless
he made it to the birds; because al.
though the bulk of him came down all
right in tree top in an adjoining coun.
| ty, the rest of him was apportioned
around among four townships, and SO
they had to hold five inquests on him
to find out whether he was dead or not
and how it occurred. You never saw q
boy scattered so.
Thus perished the good little boy who
did the best he could, but didn't come
out according TO the books. Every boy
who ever did as he did prospered eXcep
him. His case is truly remarkable. II
will probably never be accounted for
The GaiaTy.