The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1870-03-26
Too Good 10 Keep.
From the Champaign Union, ?ith ult.
Music hath charms TO soohe a savage,
Rend u rock and split a cabbage"

There are doubtless, among our friends who
formerly lived in Fulton county, but are now
residents OF Champaign and Piatt, some who
Will remember an occurrence which took place
III Canton many years ago, and which excited
much amusement at the time.
There was travelling juggler whose name we
forget, but who, proposing to give exhibition
in Canton OF his proficiency in the occult sciences
cast about for some person who could add the
charms of music to the entertainment. 1t chanc.
ed that h. first inquiries were addressed to a
person whose Christian name William, but
who was commonly known as "Od Tear" which
sobriquct arose from the extraordinary number
of trowsers-seats which he had worn out in play
ing the game known as old sledge.
II know your man." said O. r. "Ame B.
is just the teller. He's up to anything in the
musical line, but his strong suit is the fiddle.
He'll tell you he don't know anything about it,
but don't you mind him he'll do it if you stick
TO him long enough"
The juggler accordingly made overtu.es to our
friend Col D. who, having been previous.
y informed or the trick, consented to Ofticiate az
head vio!inist. lie also recommended q friend
Of his to accompany him on the clarinet, and the
magician at once engaged the services of both,
though be it known to our readers that neither
of them could play a note.
Before the eventful evening arrived, B
went to the shop of Niger barbar of his &C.
quaintance, and took few lessons in the art of
holding gracefully the fiddle and the bow" and
when the time arrived, accompanied by his
friend, who bore clarinet of portentous size.
they ascended the platform, with all the air and
mien of accomplished artists.
The news had spread far and near that there
would lie fun at the show, and the house was
packed close with spectators though the juggler
was innocent of any knowledge of the affair. He
saw the quarters rapidly accumulate in the tick.
ct Office, and his cup of happiness was full. In
nocent soul, he little thought how small share
his cups and balls and magic hats had to do with
the receipts of the evening.
The juggler assembled the platform and waved
his hand deep silence rested upon the audi
ence, like an army blanket, while he addressed
it in fow brief words. The signalsfor the mu-
sic was given, and "Old TearIandlZal g.,
who sat in the front rank, "grinnedk horribly a
ghastly SMILE" but the faceslof2the orchestra
were stern and grim-no shadowIofla smile hov.
cred about their frn-set jaws, asithey raised the
| fiddle and clarinet to the first position,
"Squawk! Too.!' The magician started
"Toot.oot.q y.too.oo-oot.o.oo
-"What the h--ll"-"too.oot.ott s9uawk.toot.
| tiddyd yi-iddy-to-ooooo
The juggler at first essayed tn speak, but paus-
ed, dumfounded as tho roar which broke from
| the threats of his auditors told HIM that there
| were features in the evenings entertainment
which no could not regard as wholly unexp ected
Still the faces of the performers gave no indica.
| ton that anything unusual was going on while
| the horse hair and clarinet combined to produce
such confederation of strange and discordant
sounds rs few but the listeners have ever heard
except those who have attended the Mumbo jun.
DO dance vi the Ashantees The tune, 80 the
ju0ger afterwards remarked, was the longest he
had ever heard, but, like all sublunary things, it
came at last to close, and the legitimate per.
Torrance commenced. The magician took the
music in good part, and called out several more
tunes in the course Of the evening, all of which
were loudly cheered by the audience, which
finally dispersed in the best possible humor.
Years have passed, and the incident had al.
most FADED from the memory of the Colonel, who
mad meanwhile become a wealthy railroad con.
tractor, and a mighty man in political circles.
when, being in an adjoining county, and feeling
thirsty, he stopped into restaurant and called
Tor beer. Having drank glass, he laid the
money on the bar, but tho proprietor, paying no
attention 70 it, said
10 you play tho fddle?"
what curtly.
"Do you live in Canton ?"
Yes, sir; will you please to: give me my
Amt your name E----.9r
"Yes. sir"