The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1870-04-14

the more moneS.she'll spend. When that
7 ladys husband died there were bad whis-
! pers around, but she smothered 'em all
under the mourning gear of the funeral.
1t was immense | made-weIl, no mat
ter It wont do TO be too particular in
these things, Evil communications cor
rupi good manners, you know Ha, ha,
ha !"
''How do things 90" we asked, sswhen
wife dies, leaving an inconsolabIe hus-
band with an outside sweetheart, to mourn
her loss ?"
THAT depends a good deal on the man
Some men are such brutes, so coarse and
gross, that they have no sentiment, nor
any sense fpropriety either. Such men
are bad for US, They tumble their wives
into the grave without regard 10 appear
ances. But if the husband is sentiment
al, or scary, or a hypocrlte, be comes
down handsomely to death, aud gives his
wife gorgeous burial. Eve sometimes
thought that the presence of the sweet
heart at the funeral helps things along, as
the husband would naturally want to see
how handsomely she'd be buried when her
turn came ; but that may be merely my
fancy. Bot, anyhow" said the under
taker, with solemn emphasis, 81 tell you,
there's wickedness in this town.
allow do you like TO bury public
man-sav an alderman 2" we asked.
ooh, that's low !" answered the under
taker. in tones Of disgust. ''Stiil," he ad-
ded, "il you know your men, and the city
government takes hold to pay decent re-
spect to the memory of the distinguished
deceased, and all that, you can sometimes
make n pretty good thing out of it Bat,
rs a general thing, the city fellows grab
everything, and don't leave an outsider
even a nickel show"
'And what do you mean by nickel
show ;"
81 mean that they don't leave a feNow
even a nickel to show for his share of the
damages -
"Ah, see. Blu; between you and me,
now, how would you like to have the bur
rying of Tweed, or Sweeney, or Oaky
Hall, or all of them together 20
"Oh. wouldn't | like it When them
fellows die, there'll be high times in the
city treasury. There'll be no end to COM
mittees of appropriations bot their final
burial will be a cheap thing for the city
in the end, no matter wIiqt it costs.
should like to be in that pool. Have you
any in1lence with the ring If you have
rhy-you understand I'm liberal in
these matters, and always stand by my
friends till L bury them
We disclaimed having any influence
with the ring, as the garrilous undertaken
set US down in Printing House square,
opposite the San building, and went his
way to Greenwood As we walked to
our office it occurred to US, as it will
sdoubtless occur to manv-cf our readers,
that undertakers, as well as graves, have
secrets in their keeping, and also that an
undertaken does not keep a secret anything
like so well as grave does N Y. Sun.
ONE OF COLD ABE's" STORIES NEVER
BEFORE IN PRINT-We are indebted to a
friend for a story Of Lincoln's which we
have never before seen in print. 1t was
told to him by Mr.. Davis, of Hillsboro,
Ill who served with Lincoln in the
Legislature of that State. On one occa-
sion cold Abe came into his room, and
was reminded of a story. to the follow
ing purport:
He was called to an out-of- the way
place to attend to some legal business in
the midst Of terribly cold winter. His
client was an old Kentucky hunter who
kept number of dogs The hunter met
him very cordially, but remarked that he
was sorry he could give him no better ac~
commodations, as bis house was one
story log hu'. After supper, Lincoln was
put to bed in the lott, where he could dis
tinguish everything going on below.
About midnight an enormous hound be-
gan to howl. and pretty soon Lincoln
heard the wife's voice. saying ''get up,
Dick, aud stop that dogs noise ; he'll
wake up Mr. Lincoln" The old man
turned uneasily in bed and muttered in
coherenily, ooh, shut up, Peg; lincoln
can sleeps we'll as we can Soon the
dog howled again, and the woman re-
peated her request, attending it with some
lively punches until the old man was
worried into rising, though very regret
fully. lie went into the yard with no
clothing on except his shirt, and was gone
some time. Peggy's curiosity was arous-
ed to know the cause of his absence and
finally, after many preliminary moves
and EXPLANATIONS, she rose herself, and
stepped out of the house in the same
undressed condition. Lincoln peeped
through between the logs, and saw the old
man holding The hound by the ears. He
was hailed by the loving spouse with,
''Why, what in goodness gracious sake
are you dong 7" The hunters response
was short and direct elm holding this
ID dog till he freezes to death, SO that
he won't keep Lincoln awake any
longer"
PUNcn's ''He smole a CHASTITY smile, y
-