The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1870-06-28
nLosBs ON GARDENING.

We are satisfied that BlcDes mas az
last found an occupation where he VIII
shine as a pre-eminent success. 1t is
horticulture. Greeley and Mark Twain
are both telling the world what they
know about farming. We propose to
tell what Blobbs is learning about hor-
ticulture. We pronounce it with sol
emn awe, as horticulturist he is a
cuss.
This was the way of it
Mrs. B. remarked to him the other
morning, after he had hysted in his
regular morningquart of coffee, "Blobbs,
do you see that garden?'
Taking his eye he cast it upon the
foot square of earth set up edgeways
which Mrs. B. denominates garden
it is back garden-and remarked in
his usually silvery accents, 81 do"
"You sse," she said, "the weeds are
taking possession of it 1t needs hoe
ing, dearest"
Blobbs gazed on the face Of his cara
spousa, then on the thermometer, and
then on the garden. His gaze fingered
longest on the the thermometer. 1t
marked q4o in the shade.
There was an evident design on the
part of Mrs. B. to melt her lord and
master, but Blobbs rose equal to the
occasion and weather. He said:
Beloved, we are just one hoe short
of having any at all.
The salt tears began to show them
selves in her eyes and the perspiration
on her nose as she said, "Unkind, you
do not love me as you used to did, or
you would not object to hoeing up those
weeds.
The. tears and reproach were too
many for Blobbs. Away he went that
afternoon to Lem. Busbey, which is a
first class hardware store, purchased a
hoe, and returned home and went to
work.
In short time the place had chang
ed its appearance. Where before was
rank and luxurious vegetation there
was nothing left but three hardy-look-
ing, vigorous plants whose notched
leaves and delicate perfume bespoke
them rare exoties procured at vast
expense by Mrs. B. from the Botanical
Gardens at Washington, maybe. These
Blobbs was fixing with the tenderest
care. Around their roots he had gath
cred the softest and richest soil Fresh
water, not a particle too cold, he had
washed their leaves with till the dark
green shone again in the RAYS Of the
setting sun.
He had nearly finished his task when
Mrs. Blobbs appeared. No sooner did
she see the carefully cleaned garden
than she gave squawk, rolled up her
ewes like duck dying of the toothache
and sank fainting to the earth. "Too
much sunshine thought Blobbs, as he
gathered the slop bucket, and poured
the coffee grounds and tea-leaves it con-
tanned in the face of the partner of his
JOYS. 1t made her.vcry nasty. but it
brought her round.
You brute, she shouted see what
YOU have done; not satisfied with ruin
ing my garden Won have ruined my
dress.
Ruined the garden" replied the
astonished Blobbs. Hcthought he had
done his work magnificently and he felt
hurt to be told that he had ruined the
Job. Ruined the garden, my dear,
what dost mean? 2
"Mean?" said Mrs. B., with Us much
contempt expressed in the up-turn of
her pug-nose as she could coax there
while wiping the coffee-grounds ont of
her eve. Mean? whv you've hoed up
all my flowers"
'Ifatter myselfyou re mistaken, Mrs.
B" said Blobhs majestically, as he
pointed to the plants he had so deli
cately rendered DO you see that
yes, see Mot. What of Mat?'
Can You gaze on that beautiful plant
and say destroyed your flowers?
You're II fool, Blobbs, said the
madam rather spitefully. Any man
who will hoe mp everything in garden
but a .jiimpson 'oeed is drafted fool
and | amt afraid to tell him so
We repeat our first assertion. As a
horticulturist and florist, Blobhs is
cuss.