The Placer herald., 1870-10-01

gentleman had long been looking for man
at Long Branch in whom he could rely, and
as he had had the mosht unbounded conf
dence in me cousin, he had taken the liberty
of Addressing him on the subject. He said
he had quantity of imitation greenbaclxs,
a perfect copy of the original ones, and that
he would sell them at ten cents on the dollar,
and that if me cousin was as sharp as he
had been credited for being, he could turn an
honest penny in addition to his other business
! and re- one would be any wiser He con-
cluded by asking me cousin to take howld
of the business, and give him an order. Me
cousin Ulysses exed me if | thought it would
be honest. He never likes to 90 Until any
new speculation widout duplicating me.
told him that while it would be constituted
in.o dishonesty be his enemies, yet, if he
had conscience Of doing right, and acted
upon that consciousness, he could do no
wrong, more especially as we were completely
out of money, barring hundred dollars
which was sent us from the conscience fund,
and advised him TO invest that onyway
lie took me advise and sint the lether in a
registered lether, and be return mail we
recaved the greenbacks. Ye couldn't pass
them on a blind fiddler. The whole lot want
worth tin cents. And that's the way Chafe
Magislathc of a Great Nation s treated by
his subjects, is it? Arrah sir | tell yez
society musht 5e in terrible static of demor-
alization, whin The position me cousin howds
does not grant him immunity and protection
from the Vaccinations of such enemies. The
only way me cousin thinks it possible to get
rid of the photographs is to kape them till
we get to Washington and put them on the
collection plate at the church we attend, where
the man that passes the plate is nare-sighted
Ne cousin has written to the base deceiver,
and towld him if he will refund the hundred
dollars he viii be granted full Executive
pardon.
Ne cousin Ulisses, whin he returned from
the funeral, brought his mother with him,
and as the ovid lady has an enormous appa-
tite, it became necessary to lay in a shtock
of provisions, and as we were out Of money,
me cousin gave NE lis diamond breast pin,
presinted to him by the Boshton Posht Mash
ter and axed Inc could go and pawn it for
few hundred dollars until he could dishpose
Of some officc or rccayc remittance from
the conscience fund. tuck it to a gintleman
be the name of Three Balls, who kapes a
variety, shtore mare the Wesht End Hotel,
and axed him 10 loan me a few hundred dol
lars. He looked it over wild shpy glass,
and said he couldn't let me have more than
a hundred and siymty-five cents on it. He
said the yellow setting was pretty good
imitation of goold, bat the glass was piece
of broken tumbler Did yc iver see the
perhdy of min Me cousin has been wear
ing that pin two years, under the impression
that it was equal 10 Jim I'isk's diamond,
and now finds it isn't worth the price of
treatall around for a Cabinet mate;ng. There
is a shplendid opening in Boshton for some re-
liable man to get poslt Office mighty cAape.
Thus are we finding out livery day where
new and startling frauds have been perpetra-
ted on us, and afther this the fonisht piece
of .jewelry in the world will have no weight
toward getting an Office. Nothing but
granebacks OF horses will be lagal tnder
hereafter.
Yers hungry,
TrD->-cr. JCf,