The Plymouth Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1869-1941, 1870-10-20
MISCELLANEOUS rTEkssss

| a-hlu
THE best thing to give to the poor
employment.
& WONDERFUL AERIAL PHENOMENON
"A flight of stairs
a LASS am no more" as the girl said
when sac got married.
| WHEN is a lot o. corn ike a corner lot:
| When it's ground.
| IT does no. follow that the moon las a
dollsr because it has four quarters.
THE sting Of bee carries conviction
with it. 1t makes man a bee-leaver at
once.
IF mans aim in this world be good,
| the chances are that he will miss fire in
the next
LARGE butterflies and bugs are now
worn in the hair, made Ct silver or gold,
q Ia Nilsson.
OUT of the total area of Great Britain,
3o,336,000 acres, or SO per cent, are under
cultivation.
WANT of credit is blessing undisguis-
ed sonetimes-for instance, when a man
can't even borrow trouble"
Oh recent Sunday, the Rev. John
Jones, of Surry county, North Carolina,
aged 81 years, baptized, by immersion,
Harden G. Herring, aged IS.
A SIGN at one Of the improvised hotels
IN Springfield, Mass, reaGs: "Boreding
by the meel, and Logging st awl hours"
A SINGLE oat in Scotland produced ten
stalks, which contained nine hundred
grains, or an average Of ninety grains to
the stalk.
THERE are two directly opposite rea-
sons why some men have poor credit
one because they are not known, and the
other because they are knoSn.
THE editor of the Middletown Comm
Constitution, calling attention to an adver-
tiserent, says: See plain statement in
southeast corner of this paper"
"MR SMITaERs, how can you sleep so
The sun he's been up these two hours"
"Well, what if it hss?" said Smithers.
He goes to bed at dark, while Pm up
TIL after midnight"
A CERTAIN doctor asked Spiffkins
which he thought was the best way to
die. Surely" he replied, "you might
have learned that much from your pa
TENTS"
THE McCrary farm, in the oil regions
of Peppsy lvanis, is said TO have been sold
during the month Of August, Was 1853
barrels.
TEE force of habit We know gentle |
man who is so methodical in business
that When he pays compliment to his
wife, he always VIII insist on taking g re-
ceipt.
DANIEL PURCELL was desired one night |
IN company to make q pun extempore.
" Upon what subject?" said Daniel.
" The king" snswered the other. "Oh,"
said he, "tne king IS no subject"
FRANCE, though not greater in area
than the State of Texas, produces more |
wheat than the whole United States, the |
figures being 350,G0O,O00 bushels for |
France, and 240,O0O,000 tor the United |
States.
II ii be wise to insure your property, |
the loss of which would fail heavily upon |
your flmily, it is wiser 10 insure your
life, the loss of which would be a blow
infiniteiv heavier. Insure ia the Mutual |
-RECEIPTTO CURE A LOVE FIJI
Tie end of a rope fact over a beam,
And make siip-noose ct tot1er extreme;
Then just underneath let crlcset be set
On which let the lover most maniully get;
over his head let the moose then be GO,
And u der one ear be well set led the knot;
Tine cricket kicked down. lei him take .sir swing,
Ard leave all the rest Of the work TO the string.
DICKENS says: Il have heard vast guam
titles OF nonsense talked about bad men
not looking you in the face. Don't trust |
that conventional idea. Dishonesty will |
stare you out Of c0untenance any day in |
the week, If there is anything to be got |
by it,
A CAPTAIN in the British navy, meet
ing q friend as he landed at Portsmouth, |
boasted that he had left his whole ships
company the happiest fellows IN the |
world. GLOW so ?" asked his friend. |
"Why, l have just logged seventeen, and
they are happy it is over and all the |
rest arc happy that they have escaped"
A DUBUQUE Qowa) jeweler has en-
graved the Lords prayer upon the IN
verse side OF gold dollar The Ameri-
can.Tract Society ought to employ him TO
turn out more of these jobs, for 1t IL
the only way in which the Lords pray
er can be brought to the notice of some
men.
For the benefit of young girls who are
impatient to put on trained skirts, 1t may
be stated that the Princess Beatrice,
daughter of QGeen Victoris, nos nearly
16 years old, has never yet worn anything
but short dresses, even upon the grand
occasion of drawing room" reception,
when court trains are universal.
DUBUQUE grocer having had an un-
precedented demand for vinegar tor sew
eral days, bottles, mugs, jugs, basins, tea
pots, and other pots, having been con-
stantly coming tor supply OF the acid
fluid, was tempted to try its quality Tor
himself, when he discovered that he had
A. cly q
of old Bourbon whisky at ten cents
quart.
WASHINGTON was the soul OF punctu-
atty, and required those ABOUT him to be
punctual. When his private secretary
upon one occasion excused himself for the
lateness of his appearance, on the ground
that his watch was to blame, his master
quietly said, then you must get another
watch, or another secretary"
A WESTERN editor improves the occa-
SION presented by the casual descent OF
one of his No IL brogans upon an unsus'
pecting Colorado" Ill the following pa
thetlc strain:
lone more potato bug
Gone to his rest;
Stepped so tenderly,
Cause II was best.
Poor little tater bugl
Smashed TO the dust'
In Thy prosperity,
Business has bust.
A GENTLEMAN dropped letter In Mem.
phis the other day. bystander picked
| it up and returned it to the owner, say
ing: "You have dropped paper, sir; 1t
may be valuable" The gentleman
thanked him, locked at the wandering
document, and replied: Valuable! not
at all Its only love-letter." Sentimental
young ladies' can make note of this.
| PRoF. COCKER, of Michigan Univer-
sity, an Englishmsn himself, spent the
summer in the "old country" and tells
the story that one well-iniormed person
demonstrated to him the impossibllity OF