Vicksburg weekly herald. (Vicksburg, Miss.) 1868-1883, 1870-07-16
AARK TWAIN.
HSW He Edited an Agricultural
Paper.

/ did not take the temporary
editOrship Of an agricultural paper
without misgivings. Neither would
4 landsman take command Of a
ship without m~isgivings. But !
was in circumstances that made
salary an object. The regular ed.
itor Of the paper was going of for
q holiday, and / accepted the terms
he offered, and took his place.
The sensation Of being at work
again was luxurious, and I
wrought all the week with unfaC.
ging pleasure. We went to press.
and / waited a day with some so.
licitude to see whether my effort
was going to attract any notice.
AS / left the Office, toward sun.
down, q group Of men and boys at
the foot Of the stairs dispersed
with one impulse, and gave me
assage.w way, and / heard one or
two Of them say: That's him
! was naturally pleased by this in.
cident. The next morning / found
q similar group at the foot Of the
stairs, and scattering couples and
individuals standing here and
there in the street, and over the
way, watching me with interest.
The group separated and fell back
as ! approached and I heard q man
say Look at his eyer / pre-.
tended not to observe the notice /
was attracting, but secretly / was
pleased with it, and was proposing
TO write IN account Of it 10 nv
aunt. ] went up the short fight
Of stairs, and heard cherry voices
and a ringing laugh as / drew near
the door, which / opened, ard
caught a glimpse Of two young,
rural looking men, whose faces
oIanched and heightened when
they saw me, and then they both
plunged through the window with
a great crash. ] was surprised.
In about half an hour an old
gentleman, with a flowing beard
and q fine but rather austere face.
entered and sat down at my inyi-
tation. He seemed to have some
thing on his mind. He took of
his hat and set it on the floor, and
got out Of it a red silk handker.
chief and a copy Of our paper.
He put the paper on his lap, and
while he polished his spectacles
with his handkerchief, he said:
Are you the new editor"
! said ! was.
Have you ever edited an agri.
cultural paper before Z"
NO." / said; this is my frs;
attempt
very likely. Have you had
any experience in agriculture,
practically"
mo, l believe | have not"
Some instinct told me So" said
the old gentleman, putting on his
spectacles and looking over them
at me with asperity, while he fold
his paper into q convenient
Il wish TO read you what
must have made me have that in.
1t was this editorial.
and see if it was you that
wrote it: ,
"Turnips should never be pulled !
it Injuries them. II is much bet.
ter to send a boy up and let MIN .
the tree" ,
Now, what do you think of {
that FOR l really suppose you {
wrote it?" ,
Think Of it? Why, / think it ,
good. | think it is sense. iii
have no doubt that, every year, ,
millions and millions Of bushels :
Of turnips are spoiled in this town 8
ship alone by being pulled in a {
half condition, when, if they .
had sent a boy up TO shake the {
tree" .
shake your grandmother ! /
don't grow on trees :" :
"Oh, they don't, don't they {
Well, who said they did? The !
language vas intended to be fgu. +
wholly fgurative. Any i
body that knows anything, will !
know that | meant that the boy I
shake the vine ,
Then this old person got up and !
tore his paper all into small 7
shreds, and stamped on them, and :
broke several things with his cane, I
and said ] did not know as much :
as a COW; and then went out and :
banged the door after him, and, in :
short, acted in such a WY that / I
he was displeased about :
But, not knowing =
what the trouble was, l could not :
be any help to him. ;
Pretty soon after this q long, c
cadaverous creature, with lanky {
locks hanging down to his Shout q
1ers and a weeks stubble bristling G
from the hills and valleys of his q
face, darted within the door, and Q
halted, motionless, with finger on g
lip, and head and body bent in lis y
attitude. No sound was q
heard. Still he listened. No t
Then he turned the key in a
he door, and came deliberately 9
toward me, till he was L
uithiR lnn1 ,n.aks-- Is.4a FL