The Van Buren press., 1870-10-25
MISCELLANY.
A Legal Tender.
BY JUDGE CLARK.

oaul otreleal was tnc paragon OF Dacn
elors. His age was puzzle in chronol
ogy. If you judged, as jockeys do, b,
the teeth, you would set him down a
about thirty-for they were perfect-as
white as pearl, and not one missing His
glossy chestnut locks-granting it was
not a wig he wore--bore similar testi.
mony, which was further corroborated
by figure whose symmetry spoke well
for the handicraft Of nature, or Of art
whichever was entitled to it.
He boarded with Mrs Nothermann, q
respectable widow, who furnished accom-.
modations to a few first class single gen.
tlemen, partly for the sake of society,
and partly-not
Mr.. Sereleaf was man Of steady hab-
its He had taken up his abode with the
widow on first coming to the place, and
had never since thought Of changing
Indeed, neither party hSsd any reason to
be dissatisfied MrhS s room was al
ways tidy, the widow chatty, he afable,
and his bills never day in arrear. What
more was wanting toSnake things pleas
ant? liel
| After a time Mr. S. got to be the sen
ior boarder. Others had come and gone
but he remained permanent. To sil
facing the widow at the table, say grace,
carve the beefsteak, and lead the conver-
sation, were prerogatives more firmly his
by prescription, than they had ever been
or the dead and gone Nothermann, by
martial right.
1t was Mr.. Sereleaf with whom the
window counseled in her trials, and IN
whom she reposed her condolences. lie
converscd with her, read to her, and &C.
companied her to church on Sundays, and
any little difficulty in the sermon, or knot
ty point in the trimming of lady's bon
net, he would clear up on the way home,
in manner equally charming and attrac-
tive.
Whether the twain, in time, would have
been more--or less-to each other, had
the widow adhered strictly to her rule to
receive none but single gentlemen as
boarders, is one of those questions al.
ways unsolvable, touching what would
have happened, had something else taken
place that never did
Enough to say, Mrs. Nothermann,
yielding 10 influential references and the
offer OF tempting price, let her best suite
Of vacant rooms-they were next to Mr..
Serelcaf afs--to family composed Of o
gentleman and his wife aud baby.
Babies were Mr.. Sereleaf's abomna-
ton. He looked upon them as toddling
monuments of original sin. He had no
patience with them, or with anybody that
had them. The sight of one gave him a
turn, and the sound drove him frantic.
In this particular baby, all Mr.. Serc-
leafs objections to babyhood in the alb
stract were summed up in the concrete
1t was subject to Group land when it hadn't
Group, it had collie; and when it had
neither, it was troubled with teething.
The first night Mr. Sereleaf stuffed the
blanket in his ears, but he might as well
have attempted to stihc thunder He tried
to count himself to sleep, but the squalls
put him out; and when he strove to
count them, they became continent and
undstinguishable
The next night it was worse. lie
couldn't even say his praycrs-in fact
didn't feel like it. He paced the room
in sleepless agony. Something had to
be done. He had been a boarder in the
house for five years, and had never yet
uttered complaint. He was very 10th
to do it now; but needs must, when q
certain person drives.
"rll propose to Mrs. Nothermann'-
and he smote his fist upon the table, by
way of cmphasis-I'll propose to Mrs
Nothermann," he exclaimed, " to put me
in another room, come what will ~
The air Of moody melancholy with
which Mr., Sereleaf moped through the
following day caused the widow much
concern. Nor was her trepidation abatcd
when, after tea, he intimated desire to
see her alone.
at is with much hesitation,' he began
in agitated voice--whcn they had reach
ed Mrs. Nothermann's back parlor -" it
is with much hesitation that venture to
speak" Here he quite broke down,
and the widow turned very red and trem
blcd violently.
81 am sure, madame" Mr.. Sereleaf re.
sumed, "if you only knew how much
have suffered"
"Oh! Mr.. Sereleaf" sighed the wild.
ow.
"Mrs. Nothermann y said Saul, max
ing desperate effort to come to the
point, ~ have come to propose"
But before he could explain what it was
he had LEONE to propose, the lady