The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1870-05-18
SHREVEPORT:
lin SmilhY's Frog.

Jim Smiley's Frog.
w. make no apology for occupying so much of our
graoo with the following, which is called " Mark
Tvan,s Masterpiece" An exchange justly remarks
o+ il IS production which is destined to ''go the
rounds" for many wears as Of the richest sPeci-
mems Of quiet American humOr:
He cotched him a frog one day and took him home,
and said be calated to educate him and so he never
done nothing for three months but to sit in his back
ward and learn the frog how to jump And you bet
he did learn him too. He'd give him little punch
behind and the next moment you'd see the frog whlrl-
ing in the air like dorghnut-see him turn sum-
merset, and maybe couple if be got good start,
and come down fatfooted and all right like cat. lie
got him up in the matter OF catching hies and kept
him in practice so constant, that he nail y every
time as far as he could see him.
Smiley said that all the frog wanted was education,
and he could do almost anything and believe him.
Why, I've seen him set Daniel Webster down here on
the 1oor-Danie Webster the name of the frog
and sing out Flies Dan1, flies" and quickeT'n you
could wink he'd spring up and shake fly off n the
counter there and flop down the floor again as
solid goo Of mud and fall to scratching bis head
with his hind foot as Indifferent if he hadntno idea
he'd done any morn any frog might do. You never
seed a frog modist and straightforward as he was,
for all he gifted. And when it came to a
square jump dead level, be could get over more
ground at stTadde than any animal of bis breed
strong suit you understand and when come to that
Smiley was monstrous proud of his frog and we'll he
might be, for elers that have Travelled and bin every
where said that he laid it every frog that they
seed.
Well, Smiley kept the beast in lattice box, and
he used to fetch it down town sometimes and lay for a
bet. OECe feler--a stranger in camp be was-came
him with his box and says:
4" What might it be you've got in the box"
And Smiley said, sorter Indifferent like:
- 1t might be parrot or it might be canary may
be; but it amt, it is only Just frog"
And the Teller took it and looked at it careful, and
turned it around this way and that, and says
H'm-so It's. Well, what's be good for"
Well" Smiley says, easy and careless, "hes good
enough for one thing should jadge-he can out
Jump any frog in Calaveras county"
The Teller took the box again and took another long
and particular look, and gives it back to Smiley and
says very deliberatc
We'll, don't see no points about that frog that's
any better'n any other frog"
Maybe you don't Smiley said. Maybe you I'M
derstand frogs, and maybe you don't understand EN-
maybe you amt only an amateur, as it were. ANY
ways I've got my opinion, and III risk forty dollars
that he can ouGump any frog in Calaveras county"
And the teller studied minute two, and then
says, kinder sad like: WELL Tn only stranger here
and amt got frog but if had frog I'd bet you"
And then Smiley says: That's all right. If you'll
hold my box a minute I'll go and get you frog :"
and so the Teller took the box and put up bis forty
dollars along with Smlleys and sat down to wait.
So he sat there a good while, thinking to hsself
and TUX the frog out and pried open his mouth and
took teaspoon and filed him full of quail shot-fled
him pretty near up to the chin-and set him on the
floor Smiley, he went out to the swamp and stopped
around in the mud for long time, and finally he
ketched a frog and fetched him in and gave him to
the Teller and says
Now, if you are ready, set him alongside of Dam
icl with his fore paws just with Dan's, and I'll
give you the word" Then he says, "one-two-
three-jump and him and the Teller touched up
the frogs from behind, and the frog hoped off
lively, but Darl gave heave hsted up bis shoulder
-So--like a Frenchman, but it wasn't no use; he
couldn't bulge; he planted as solid as an anvil
and he couldn't more stir than if be was anchored
out. Smiley good deal surprised, and he was
disguised, too but he didn't have idea what the
ter was of course.
The Teller took the money and started away, and
when be was going out of the door he sorter erked
his thumb over his shouder-this way--at DanI, and
says again, very deliberate Well | don't see no
other points about that frog that's any bete:n any
other frog"
Smiley he stood scratching his head and looking
down at Dan'l long time and at last he says II do
wonder what in the nation that frog throwed off for
wonder if there amt something the matter with him;
he pears to look mighty baggy somehow :" and he
kecbed Dan| by the nape of the neck and lifted him
up and says Why, blame my cat if he don't weigh
five pounds" and turned him upside down, and he
bechcd out double handful of shot, and then be see
how il was, and he was the maddest man He set the
frog down and took after that teller. But he Eever
keched him.