The Conservative. (M'connelsville, Ohio) 1866-1871, 1870-06-03
cuRREhT PARAcRApAs.
Facts and Figures.

THE Greek brigands very kindly took
their captives up to the village church to
attend service about half an hour before
massacreing them. No effort or expense
was spared to make things pleasant for the
victims.
IT IS SAID that Brigham Youre has an
eye turned toward Mexico, if there is am
attempt made to compel him and his saints
TO sbandan polygamy, and that 5aurez is
willing to receive him and his wives with
open arms.
HE fashionable shoe for ladies is made
seven inches high, with an inch and a half
= heel, Spanish lnstep, arched sole, a NOV
able heel of gilt or silver, with an India
rubber tip to deaden the sound, and they
+ cost from So to $50 pair.
IT is declared that the case of the English
criminal sentenced to be hanged, and who
could not be executed owing to q malfor-
! nation of the neck, has done more to for
ward the cause OF abolition of capital pun
ishment in Britain than the efforts of the
phllanthropists for hundred years.
AT BELvDERE-oN- THAMES, England
there is an asylum for old sailors. Not
long since an election took place, there be-
ing twelve times as many candidates as
vacancies. VIM. Moses Blanchard was one
VI tuC ChuuAtthlcS cltCLtu 10 "a VACANCY. AnQ
Walter Ryan to an ont door pension. The
announcement of these facts to them oeca-,
stoned their deaths by excess of Joy.
A HOTEL bell boy in Detroit proves to be
girl. She has worked on a canal as
driver, on steamer as cook. and IN chair
factory, without her sex being discovered.
She wears her hair ''shingled, can smoke,
sometimes drinks, and says that when she
gets very mad she can swear too She is a
remarkable specimen Of the wild girl Of
the West.
A PRINTERS 'simp" in Detroit, sandy
haired and speckled-facsd, working for SIS
per week, astonished his employers and
the composltOrs in the Office by getting
married the other day. Their jibes, how
ever, were cut short when they learned
that he had married an heiress, and that
his wife could buy halt dozen establish
ments like that in which her liege lord
was serving an apprenticeship.
FISK has S35, 900 turnout for Long
Branch this season. It is a pretty good
sort of a wagon which he will ride in, and
six horses will drag it. The first, or wheel
span, will be composed of 'snigh" black
horse, and white "off horse; the middle
span will be a nigh white and black of. and
Uice Ue-Sd for the leaders, and with these he
will run his checkered career ''on the beach
at Long Branch"
A TRAVELLER, who demanded his trunk at
a Baltimore depot before all others and was
tod by the Irisn baggags-master that he
must have patience and wait his turn,
turned upon the baggage-master with,
''You're an impudent dog" To which he
of the trunks rejoined: ''An' faith, ye are
monkey, and it's great pity that, when We
two were made basres, ye wasn't made an
illphant, 50 that ye could have Ger blasted
trunk under yer nose all the time"
A DUEL was fought the other day at May
ence between two military officers, Captain
Bibra and Lieutenant Rocques, in which
the latter was killed At review Lieuten-
ant Rocques saluted his superior officer,
who ''eut" him by net returning it, and
when questioned afterward about the mat
ter, gave rude answer. So the Lieuten-
ant challenged him and was killed, because
man wouldn't return his bow.
Nor A COMPUNCTIoN.-I did shoots burg
lar; have good reason to believe he was
white man; possibly light-colored negro.
believe man was seen lying dead in the
bushes. He was hurried out of sight by
some confederate, early in the morning.
believe he belonged to gang which that
shot was the means of hurrying out of
town; know not; but I know have no
for his death.
TIE BRITISH MUsEUM.-The British MH-
scum has cost the Government nearly
$40, OOO, 900, and it now costs $50. 900 a
year to maintain it, or more than dollar
for every person that visits it. But the
North Kensington Museum, which costs
less, IS visited by three times as many peO-
pie. The difference is in the management
rather than in the attractiveness of the col
lectiOns.
The GREAT PIG-PEN CAsR.-The ''Hook-
sett pig pen case" ought to rank with the
PIckwick trial. Years ago, pig-pen stood
near the road in Hooksett, New Hampshire,
the inmates whereof innoeently frightened
the horse of a passer-by, causing injuries
to the rider. The 'sinjuree" straightway
sued the town as the injurer, and won the
case, but higher court has now absolVed
the town from all Responsibility.
A BOSTON man proposed to visit New
York recently, via the Hartford 4 Erie r.
Il. AS he was little early for the train, he
bought newspaper, and after looking at
the stock sales, picked up his valise and
started up the street. 81 thought you were
going to New York by this routs?" said a
friend. ''Well, so 1 was, but I'll be hanged
if I'll go over a road when a share of its
stock is worth less than single fare"
A SAN Francisco school teacher received
the following: '1 hope as to my John,
you viii fog him just as ofin as you kin.
Heas bad boy-is John. Altho I've bin
in habit of teachin him myself, it seems to
me he never will larn anithing-his spellin
is ottragously defshent. Wsllop him well,
ser, and you'll receive nv thanks P. p
What accounts for John being sich a schol-
'r is that he is my sun by my wife's last
husband"
THE FAMILY of one of the victims of the
disaster in Richmond, living in SYDNEY.
Va, are very poor, and, not knowing where
10 apply for aid to defray the expenses OF
he funeral, they were fsin to bury him in
.he garden by candle light. There, gather
ed around the open grave dug by their
own hands, the little group of sorrowful
friends committed the corpse with tears
and sobs to its last resting place.
A LOST CHILD at Bedford, Pa, one day
last week excited the entire town. All the
citizens turned out to hunt, and the next
day one of them found the child sitting by
the trunk of fallen tree about one mile
from where the parents live, calling for its
mother. He accordingly picked it up and
carried it home. The child appears
10 be none the worse on for this bit of rO-
nance, notwithstanding the whosping
cough at the time, and was exposed to very
weather.
Two DRoVERs went to sleep in caboose
car at Fort Wayne, last Saturday night,
hanging up on pin earpet-saek contain
ing So, ,000 Some fellow who saw il, reach
IN and got the carpet-sack, but afterward
went in through trap door to get another
one. He was siezed by bulldog, which
stepped up behind him. One of the drovers
waking up saw the situation of affairs, drew
D big knife and threatened to cut the thiefs
head off if he did not tell where the other
sack was. He told, OF course, that it was
outside, and despite his pleadings the man
was left in custody of the dog until it was
secured. He was then released, minus
about quart of blood
SOMEBODY recently asked Bristol, Conn,
gentleman how many clocks were made
yearly in that place. "Let me see; we'll
ah, said the gentleman. slowly. ''Oh,
give me rough estimate" said the in
luirer; sis it twelve, ffteen-twenty