davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
The AsiatiC IMmndatiOm-TW
Newspaper Views.
TFrom the Cincinnati Commercial. |

Congress can pass no law forbidding
immigration; certainly no law disc"imina-
ting against single nationality. If such
legislation is had it must be of d gene
raj nature, and apply with equal force
to immigration from all countries. Who
does not know that if such check were
put upon immigration, labor would be
dearer than it is, to the detriment of
all industrial enterprise The 1rishman
and the German come because wages
are better than in his own country
For the same reason comes the China
man. The latter is willing to work fol
less money than the other. He has
clear right to do SO. if he believes he is
getting all his labor is worth. He
must be the judge Of that, not Congress
nor the State Legislature, neitherof which
can undertake to regulate the prices of
labor by law.
[Fronlthe San Francisco (Cal) Examiner
We solemnly believe that no blacker
and more damning crime against llu-
manity was ever committed in any age
of the world than that of which the
men at Washington are guilty who
have voted to tie the hands Of our State
and take from it the power to protec.
her people against this Asiatic inunda-
ton. We believe that hanging would
be too good for any Senator or Congress
man from this coast who voted for the
Chinese features Of the force BILL"
We believe they are traitors to their
State, traitors to their people, and trai-
tors to humanity. They should not
be permitted to show their faces among
our people Men have been hung by
mobs for thousand-fold less crimes.
Indeed, we know Of no crime which sp-
approximates in magnitude this Mongo-
lian immigration business.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

A STRONG Casa fat old gentle
man who had been bit in the calf of his
leg by dog came to Jonah in a tower
ing passion, declaring it was Jonah's
dog that had bitten him. Expecting
an action for damages the wag drew up
the following articles as the ground for
his defence:
l. By testimony in favor Of the gene.
raj good conduct Of my dog | can prove
that nothing could make him so forget
full Of his dignity as to bite "calf.'
2. He is blind, and cannot see to
bite.
3. Even if he could see to bite it
would be utterly impossible for him to
20 out of the way to do so on account
of his severe lameness.
d. Granting his eyes and his legs to
be good he has no teeth
s. My dog died six weeks since.
6. ] never had dog.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
A New View Of the MARRIAGE
Contract.

Ellen Storge sends communication
to the Woman's Advocate, of Dayton. @.
in which she proposes the following So
cial platform:
l. Lett the marriage contract be l;mi-
ted TO from and to three years, at the
option of the contracting parties.
2 Discard the err ,neous idea that
this contract is divine; admit that this
is but the human transaction, intended
to perpetuate the species and produce
human happiness.
3. Make both parties equal; do not
exact special promises or terms from one
sex to its disadvantage and the advau.
tage Of the other. Exact pledges of mu-
tual fidelity and cooperation during
continuance of the marital contract
but let love alone. Love is sensitive,
spontaneous outgrowth of the heart, sub
ject to The control of treatment and cir
cumstances rather than formal promises;
it is too tender, too sacred, for the pub
lie gazs.
4. Let the marriage contract embrace
the contingency of issue with full and
unequlvocal provision therefor If
one child, let its custody devoIve by
written and recorded agreement, void
during cov4rture if two or more children
the same. Or division by such agreement,
provided that the party refusing to
renew the expired contract at the in
stance of the other party, or the often
der in the case of premature anntment
shall be compelled to maintain the off.
spring and be the custodian thereof, at the
option of the opposite party.
8. Enact just such laws tor the de-
termination OF all such contingencies as
might arise Under this new order of
things make them applicable only to
those now unmarried let there be ex
post facto taint about the matter. Du-
ring cover ture, as also in the event O
non-rencwal of the contract, let each par
ty control its own finances of that they
shall have together amassed, let there
be an equal division.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
Advertising.

There are certain complaints publish
ers of periodicals are apt to receive
from subscribers, which are 50 unreason
able, that we must crave the indulgence
OF the reader in little space to reply to
them. These complaints are levelled
against the appearance of advertisements
IN their tavorite Journals, the assump
ton apparently being that, having pur.
chased a copy of periodical, or sub
scribed to it, the length and breadth of
the sheet is the readers property, and
should be filled with litera ure. Now.
to these complaints Or assumptions
there are two answers. The first is,
that by means of the revenue from ad
vertisements, the publishers ara enabled
to give their subscribers far more val
liable journal than they otherwise could
afford to do. With very many periodi.
Gals the greater part of the cost of illus
trations and contributions is paid for by
the advertisements, the sheet itself be-
ing sold for little more than the bare
cost of the white paper and the print
ing. The subscriber is really obtaining,
for almost nothing, that which costs a
large outlay; and the advertisers, in
stead of being objects of his denuncia-
ton, are entitled to his gratitude.
* Advertisements are
really important in journal, being, in
fact, only SO many items of information
which it is desirable for people to know.
Advertisers could not afford to adver-
tse-aud they pay large prices-if
there were no response to their adver-
tisementsj and if responses come, the
evidence is complete that the advertise.
ments have been not only important to
the advertiser, but useful to the reader
The advantages thus are entirely mu-
tual. The reader often discovers in
the advertising pages an announcement
of new books that, as an intelligent man.
he desires to be informed about, and
which, in many cases, are of interest to
him, or, possibly, of value to his bust.
ness he finds the particulars of a new
household utensil, the purchase of which
will abridge the labor or contribute to
the comfort of his family he learns the
prices Of apparel, and thus is enabled
to employ his means judiciously and to
the best advantage in procuring articles
Of the kind; he gathers information as
to various forms of investment, by
which he may place his reserved money
in the best securities; in short, the ad-
vertising pages supply him with no lit
tie information vital to his comfort, or
important to the right understanding of
things about him. A journal without
advertisements is incomplete, and keeps
away from its readers many things they
ought to know. Advertisements are a
chronicle of the worlds progress they
exhibit it's industrial activity, and show
what is doing in the world of thought,
Of invention, and of art.-[Appletons'
Journal.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
The Coming Servant.

New York Correspondence Chicago Times.
Although he has been longed for and
extolled, and considered reconstructol
of domestic bliss, and crusader which
was to return all the lost home comforts
to US, yet it has. alas . been aivulged
that he has fault.
All the ladies were having paper
cambric dresses by the dozen made up
for him to wash, as he is renowned as a
b!eacher, and clearstarcher, and general
laundryman of the first water. The
last fact is the one distress, when it
ought to be virtue. He sprlukles, his
clothes by splitting on them.
He takes draughts of water into his
leathery cheeks and blurts 1t over the
hankerchiefs, and knapkins, etc, and
the fastidious American ladies upon the
Atlantic coast object. How fastidious
ALI their virtues can't compensate for
this one disagreeable method of damp
ening clean clothes.
Herbert Spencer believes that history
repeats itself, and that everything is
rythmical Ihope it is not true. be-
cause the fashionable chatter which has
reached my poor ears on the servant
question since one man, surlamed
Simpson, brong hit cargo of Chinamen
across the continent would drive me to
lunatic asylum if repeated.
New York, with its love of statistics
discovered just how few grains of rice
a celestial could subsist upon a day,
how many, Or rather how few, square
feet Of space he could sleep in, and
how much would be gained by adopting
this economical pig-tailed machine into
the domestic circles, and except that he
must be reorganized in his processes Of
clothes-sprinkling, he is voted to be
Just the servant for the times. The fact
that he don't have to spend any time
while praying, is much in his favor.
Carrying his Josh in his pocket, per-
mits the image to be whipped out at any
otherwise unoccupied moment, and a
minute or two of devotion given to him
without any perceptible loss of time.
In fact, this has been entered i'll the
table of statistics, and the Chinaman is
found to require about as small an
amount of reli igion as he does of rice,
and, altogether, he is pronounced a
great labor saving and inexpensive ma
chine.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
ADVICE TO MrNIsrnRs.-Do not &C.,

ADVICE TO MINIsTnRs.-Do not scold.
Do not abuse the faithful souls who
come to meeting rainy days, because 9TH
ers are too lazy to attend. Preach the
very best you can to your smallest as
semblies. Jesus preached to one woman
at the well, and she got all Samaria to
come out to hear him. NJ n -
Take long breaths. Fill your lungs and
keep them full. Stop to breathe before
before the air is exhausted. Then YOU
will not finish every sentence ah with
terrible gasp alb, as some people do ah,
and so strain their lungs ah as to make
sport for the Philistines ah.-[H. L. H.,
in the Christian.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
Americans ian Egypt.
from the N. Y. Evening Post.

The present ruler of Egypt is pursu.
ing the far reaching policy of Mehemet
Ali in extending his resources and max.
ing stronger his meals of defense.
Looking to total dismemberment O:
the vice royalty Of Egypt from the
Ottoman rule, he seeks, first of all, to
put his army in a state of efficiency.
With this view he has, it seems, invited
to his service many military men who
were prominent ON either side of the
late civil conflict in the United States.
The commaud-in- chief has, it is as
serted, been given to General Charles
P. Stone, late of the Federal army.
while General W. W. Loring, late of
the rebel army, has command Of divis-
ion, and Captain Beverly Kennon, we'll
known for his gallantry in the naval
couflicts below New Orleans as the COM
mander Of rebel ironclad, is engaged
upon the coast defenses. Many others,
among whom are Generals Jenifer,
Sibley, and Rhett, ex.rebels; Briga-
der General Alexander, formerly chief
of artillery to Stonewall Jackson !;
Lieutenant Vanderbilt Allen, formerly
Of the United States Engineers, and
Lieutenant Homer Morgan, formerly of
the Fourth United States Infantry,
have actually gone Or are about going
to Egypt to take positions in the Vice
roy's army.
These appointments derive an i,nme-
diate interest from the fact that the
signs portend war at no distant day
between Turkey and Egypt. 1t will
berecollected that nothing but the in.
reference of the European powers pre-
vented Mehemet Ali i'll 1928 from
planting his standards on the Seraglio,
and stranger things have happened
than that Yankee General should en-
ter Cons antinople as conqueror.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
The Situation i'm Mexico,

The warefare to which we have been
accustomed in Mexico for years has en-
tirely lost its military character. Sub
ordination has ceased, the great beads
Of the revolution have been deserted by
their followers, and the colonies, cap
tains, and lieutenants have become CON-
mon robbers. The notorious Bravo
meeting one afternoon poor old man
on one of his solitary walks, kindly in
formed himself of his state of health, and,
ascertaining that he owned small ranch.
Bravo made himself known and desired
the loan of $400, to be sent next morning
to his headquarters. The ranchero col
lected that sum with the greatest troub-
lie and sent it to the address given, and
while Bravo kindly sat down to write
a receipt one of his officers came in and
observed that he considered himself en-
titled to share. Unable to come to an
understanding, they drew their revolvers,
and Bravo killed his competitor. A
few days after, this valiant gang attacked
the ranch of one Bernardino Fiqueroa,
who himself was sick in bedj his sons
and servants tried to defend them
selves, but they were all killed and fire
set to the house, in which he and the
female occupants perished. Even an
outhonse, with all the cattle, was Won
tonly burned. Another fellow, named
Cassimixo Alfonso, at the head of about
200 men, dispatched body of 25 men
to the hacienda of Ecuandero, but, find
ing resistance, had to retire. Unfor-
tunately the brave Inhabitants sailed
out in pursuit of the robbers, but Alon-
SO came to the rescue. The consequence
was that fifty Of the Inhabitants We're
killed, the hacienda pillaged and the
woman outraged.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

An instructor of children was illustra-
ting the points of the compass to two
pupils
Nov, John, what is before you ?"
be asked.
1.-THE North, sir" said John, who
was an intelligent lad.
"Now, Tommy" said he to the 9TH
er, who had. just donned long coat,
" what is behind you :"
my coat tail, sir" said Tommy.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
" Potatoes" said a learned dark

Potatoes" said learned darkey
conversing with another gemmen of col.
or, " is barbac'ous, geological wegeta-
bic what grows all under ground. cept
de top, an dat bear a carniverous flow
er at the bottom. Potatoes is very good
billed, az dey am better roasted, but if
you teal the lard, de bes way of all is
to fry dem, because den de potatoes am
meat, drink, an sleep. Such am de
great merits of dis ERE escurlsnt.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

WASN'T HIS FoRTE.-A few DAYS
ago, very starchily dressed individual
called at an out-of-the-way shop on
Howard street, New Orleans, over which
swung the sign Of DR., Jetfries. SIS tks
doctor in :" he inquired Of dilapidated
darkey who answered bis summons.
" He am dat, sir" was the smiling re-
joinder. "Tel him | have symptoms
Of smallpox, and wish to consult aim.'
The whites Of the darky's eyes grew
intense, and his dusky complexion as
sumed rapidly creamy hue. "Golly,
boss, what you say?" "Tsll the doc.
tor I'm sick with the smallpox, and
wish to see him." The astonishsd Al
rican gave wild leap. darted through
an inner door, slamming it in the visi-
tors faee, and cried out, Leave dis
house; I don't want no smallpox"
{" But the doctor" "Golly, boss, Use
the doctor, but I ain't good at small
pox."
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

At the opening of a breach Of promise
case in Kentucky, the Court asked the
counsel for the plaintiff how long the
trial would probably last "I can't say
exactly" replied the counsel, but will
mention as one item that I have three
hundred and eighty-four love letters,
written by the defendant to my client,
to read"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

1t is estimated that 100000 glasses
of lager were drunk during the Cincinna-
ii saengerfsst. During the festival, a
beer-garden had the following notices
prominently placarded
"Old Testament-Give strong drink
unto him that is ready to perish, and
wine unto those that be heavy of hearts.
Let him drink and forget his poverty,
and remember his misery no more
prov. XXI, 6, T."
New Testament--Drink M longer
water, but use little wine for thy
stomach's sake and thine often infrma-
ties.-(1 Timothy, v, 3d."
Luther-Who loves not woman, wine
and song,
He is fool his whole lifelong"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

The New York San states that Ed.
ward N. Dickerson, the distinguished
lawyer and engineer Of that city, has in
vented microscope which shows an
object under an enlargement of nine
thousand million times its actual magni.
tuds.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Thackery had nose of most peculiar
shape, as may be seen from his portrait.
On one occasion, at party when Doug
las Jerrold was president, it was men
toned that Mr.. Thackery's religious
opinions were unsettled and that la.
dy of his acquaintance was doing her
best to convert him to Romanism. "To
Romanism ~ exclaimed Jerrold. LET
us hope she'll begin with his nose.''
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Could HAVE CAUGHT HER.-An T.
rishman was travelling on his way to
Manchester. N. H. He arrived at the
forks of the road where stood sign
board, which read: Manchester four
miles. MAN CHASED her four miles p
cried Paddy, be Saint Pathrick I could
have caught her meself in half the time"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

AN ABsTRUsE CALCULATION. Mr..
OFhherty undertook to tell how many
were at the party. The two Crogans
was one, myself was two, Mike Finn
was three, and-and who the mischief
was four J? Let me see, Counting his
fingers the two Crogans was one, Mike
Finn was two, myself was three-and-
bedad there was four of lis, but St. Pat.
rick couldn't tell the name of the other.
Now it's meself that have it. Mike Finn
was one, the two Crogans was two, INC
self was three-and-and be the powers,
I think there was but three of us after
all. .... ~
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Another" asked precious youngster,
" do you knew what those rings around
the moon mean I" Yes. my son
they indicate season Of continued
rain" THAT is what thought" res
ponded young hopeful. So do the
rings 'round New York indicate reign. "
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
Z sHe Next Presidency,
Washington cor. Chicago Tribune.

|
Amongst the political movements on
foot to autici pate the Presidential cam
paign of 1872, is one set up for the
workiDgmen's pending National Con-
vention by the Democrats, to nominate
John W. Geary, of Pennsylvania. 1t
is alleged that Geary, has not posi-
lively committed himself to any vital
issues, and that he has strength In his
State which politicians connot take from
him. | apprehend that this is an un.
founded presumption, like every pre-
sumption of the so-called labor party, a
party which pre- ordains its members
never to rise above their condition, and,
therefore, can never be an American
mans party. Geary is an uninterest-
ing man, who has led a romantic life,
and would like to be independent Of the
Pennsylvania politicians. He would
make very good candidate for this
sort of party, if it can be called a par
ty; ;a.' .'lodge" would be better name
for it,
Another Democratic idea is to fan the
reputation of William s. Groesbeck, of
Cincinnati. and bring him out as the
compromise candidate of Ohio betwixt
Chase and Pendleton. Groesbeck is
remembered here for his formidablespeech
delivered during the impeachment trial,
which surpassed all and perhaps infu-
eneed some. He was member of the
Thirty fifth Congress, is a man of for
tune and leasure, with a
fine, tall presence and an intellectual
countenance, but he is man of the
few, of austere manners, and with disc-
plined sympathies, and without cum
ming or political magnetism. He voted
for Pendleton as Governor of Ohio, but
favored Chase for the Presidency. 1t
is alleged here that if Chase gives up
the race in 1872, Groesbeck will be his
choice. judge Thurman, whose self
command and good luck as politician
have made him prominent during the
past four years, is also on the Presiden-
tial track. Sois Hendricks whose friends
are organizing thus far in advance.
Chase is in enfeebled health, and he
will leave the city speedily to make one
of a series of country visits which he
has contemplated.
The Western Democrats are making
every effort to prevent the nomination
of Tweed and Sweeney and their favo-
rite Hoffman, which is the grand Eastern
combination. The more sagacious and
considerate Western and New England
Democrats are rejecting that any candi-
date known to represent the views of
these desperate chiefs of Tammany,
could be beaten by Red Cloud himself
or any other pronounced or outsp, keu
savage.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

do you think, DOCTOR asked an
anxious mother, "that it would improve
little Johnny's health to take him to the
springs and let him try the waters ?"
Il haven't doubt of it, madam"
what spring would you recommend.
doctor?" "Any springs, madam, where
you find plenty of soapn'
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

A GUSHING LovER.-A "lovyer" in
whom the promethean fire burns bright
and efulgent, has worked out the fol-
lowing elegant specimen of literature
and rhyme:
90! Sally, tits my chief delite,
To gals upon your eyses brite,
My luv for you, by gosh, cirpasses
The luz feel for rum and 'lasses."
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
Tsha faef ;sn said An aIdarIv wi

"Ths fact is, " said an elderly wife,
2 a man does not know how to straighten
up things. He does not know where
to commence. I don't wonder" she
continued, that when God made Adam
be went right to work and made wo-
man to tell him what to do
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

An old farmer says the best way for
a young city chap who wants to become
an agriculturist is to hire out to some
farmer for couple of years. and then
marry a girl who knows how to raise
chickens and make pantaloons.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

At recent trial in France the FORE
man of the jury. placing his hand on his
heart and with a voice choked with
emotion, gave the following verdict :
The accused is guilty, but we have
our doubts as to the IDENTIFY
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Arich old uncle who had two neph-
ews left his will as follows To my
nephew William ! leave my whole for
tune, because / know he will bestow it
On the poor. To my nephew Alber Il
lsavs nothing, for tie same seasoa."
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

The Convention of the Protestant
Episcopal Church in the diocese Of In
diana has declared its disapproval Of
the practice Of raising money for church
purposes by means Of fairs, festivals,
lotteries, tableaux, and private theatri-
Gals.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

A man advertises for competent per-
sons to undertake the sale of new med.
icine,' and adds that I" it will be profit
able to the undertaken"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Sambo, did you ever see the Catskill
mountains p
mo sab; but I've seen um kill MICE"
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

4 lady who was invited to meet the
poet Whittier, learned twelve pages Of
his poetry by heart, SO as to be able to
quote . few lines when she was intro
duced TO him.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16

Soft soap, in some shape, pleases all
and, generally speaking, the more lye
you put into it the better.
The Opelousas journal. [volume] (Opelousas, La.) 1868-1878, 1870-07-16
TERMS OF ADVERTISING.
Transient advertisements. SO Gents per
square for each insertion. The space of eighs
ines, in this type, constitutes square
STANDING ADVERTISEMENTS.
THE HUMORISTS' COLUMN
A little nonsense now and then,
Is relished by the wiscst men.

The lash that man does not object
to having laid on his shoulders-the
eye-lash of pretty girl.