The Albany register. [volume] (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, 1870-07-16
VARIOUS ITEMS

'Tis ever sew, as the seamstress said |
An Albany lady is moribund from a
rat bite.
Ladies will please get their ages ready
for the census man.
Mrs. Mcfarland is still recuperating
in her jersey home.
May ''yivandiere" under twenty be
said to be in her can-teens
When man marries vicious woman
he becomes possessed of devil
Jealousy in married life is described
by the French doctors as ssZoanthopic in
sanity"
Baltimore lost three citizens by assas-
sinatiou.
Scotland has had the unwonted sensa-
ton of an earthquake.
Iceland threatens to secede from Dem
mark and set up on her own hook.
Maine is now Dragging Of a matron,
in her seventeenth year, the mother of
four children.
Last year 325 marriage licenses were
issued in Linn county, Iowa.
The bachelor has to look out for num-
Der one-the married man for number
two.
Why should Sampson have made
good opera singer ? Because he could
SO easily have brought down the house.
The great difference between Noah's
ark and an archbishop is that one was
very high ark, and the other is a hierarch.
Miss Ann Cary, niece Of Gen. Samuel
Cary, of Ohio, is preparing to engage in
the practice of law.
Though men boast of holding the reins
the women generally tell them which
way they must drive.
The hairdressers' shops of Madrid are
crowded with poverty-stricken Spanish
girls, anxious to sell their hair.
All the women of Utah, married and
single, oppose the abolition of the plural
ity Of wives. Their motto is, 'More.
mans.
A dentist out west had to give in the
other day lad wanted new set of
teeth put in a fine comb.
a certain girl in Nevada City likes to
make bread, because it cleans her hands
SO beautifully.
Iowa College has been astonished by
the exploits of party of s'sweet girl un-
lergraduates, who walked Is miles in
one day.
An Indiana wife, who scorns divorce,
has caught her runaway husband, had
him fined $3.50 and locked up for six
months.
A lady, who is a bit of blue, calls
the little memorandum that the butcher
sends in with the meat, s'Pencilings by
the Weigh"
A Wisconsin lumberman has been ex
citing the entire State by purchasing a
/ $4,000 shawl for his wife The other
lumbermen's wives are especially agitated
on the matter.
The Woman Suffrage Association at
Pittsburg, Penn. composed of thirty five
members, is delicately classed as "nearly
all gushing young maidens."
| Brigham Young has just been refused
by transient young lady, whom he asked
to become Mrs. Y Young No 7S She said
she was small and didn't like to take her
chances among so many jealous women.
/ A few mornings since, two gentlemen
were accosted in the following magnilo-
quent terms by a beggar Gentlemen,
! tion to debilitated constitution
i The demi-monde of New York held a
sylvan soiree dansante at Elm Park on
the afternoon and evening of the 2Sth
ult. Over 10000 men and women were
present, including prominent citizens.
Some indiscreet mice rubbed some
matches lying amongst gun cotton in a
billiard ball factory, at Albany, On. W,
and were blown up for it, together with
the building they were in.
Koopmanschap has agreed to furnish
| fifteen hundred Chinese to Alabama and
| Tennessee. Five hundred have already
been shipped.
| The republic of Colombia proposes an
alliance of the Spanish-American repub-
lie to secure the liberation of Cuba and
Porto Rica by force if necessary.
A duel between two young lawyers of
Memphis occurred opposite that city in
Arkansas on the 2Sth ult One of them
was fatally shot.
About one-third of the treasury notes
recently stolen from the Treasury build
| ing, have been recovered. One man is
under arrest charged with the robbery.
The examination of cadets at West
Point is concluded. ult-Forty eight
out of sixty-six applicants failed and had
to return home.
There were more American vessels In
the Thames in June than at any time
| since the war.
Vessels are daily arriving at the New
York quarantine ground with yellow fever
on board
The joint resolution concerning the
Southern Pacific Railroad of California
has received the Presidents signature.
A thousand dollars worth of smuggled
hair was taken from the passengers on
the Steamer Denmark.
They have an anti-yaccination league
in London, which demands the repeal OF
all vaccination laws.
The Pope has appointed three Bishops
for America, to fill the Sees of Spring
/ Go1J TT,,,.a 4 on1 port Prince.