The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1870-06-18
HOME MATTERS.
PEPPER AND SALT.

other day to keep the pcsky critters from flying
in. Notwithstanding notices posted up warn
ing thieves blacklegs and confidence men from
remaining in the city, we noticed the senior of
the RepaJltca, around as usual, but guess the
local" took the hint and LETT as we haven't seen
him any place. -. Postmaster Cameron says he'll
go through any found whiting the rail-
ing around the entrance to the post office cellar
He has borrowed butcher knife and threatens
to white the whttlers. He means blood and
'biz," and that's whats ri!ing up the ?. NJ ....
Bowman has plastered up the sides and ends of
the street sprnklers with blazing placards, call
ing upon every one 10 Get your photographs at
Bowman's.' They say almost every smooth place
about Chicago is covered with his cards . The
next question for debate by the Serena Literary
Society is to be- (which is the prettest, the 10
cal Of the FREE TRADER or catf :" The
debate is to be conducted entirely IN Norwegian
.... Among other Jokes perpetrated upon Us, we
enjoyed none better than the boxes Of strawber-
rie' smug2lel into our basket by Henry Wslther,
the nice Ottawa seedlings by Mr.. NeF, and the
cherries by Eustace. We fooled them, however,
lucky farmer in Serena who discovered the fish,
ho--ieed his farm is happy. His farm con-
taius 100 acres, OF which 80, are f.h pond full
OF the iced" .... Two dry "4ayerick," wanted
drink but had no STAMPS, so they tired strategy.
One stole potato from a basket in front OF
store with which they entered saloon and asked
the young man ''beyant the bar WAS Murphy
good for 4 thrait - so yes, responded Innocent,
wheraupon the chaps produced the potato, say
ing, Wei, there is Murphy out wild the this-
ky" He surrendered. 80. When Sam, at the
Agricultural Store, tried to see il the si,kle of
that moving machine was sharp and it cut off
his little finger, the boss" came along looking
disguised. He didn't care for Sans finger, but
hated to have the machine unused up and the
sickle daubed with blood" Sam was tying up
the end of his fnger-the end still on his hand
and looked up penitently. He said he didn't 20
! TO do t--hed never DO it again Sam is careless
about his fingers, but be Is strictly honest -.
! Out Of 500 likenesses from the Rogues' Gallery
/ in detective Cranes possession, he recognized the
originals Of fifteen being here at the races
running chuck.a-luck, loaded dice and similar
games .... They say the 10Th amendment" who
I is pa,h-master IN Rutland. in this county when
attending TO the duties of de ofus," rides about
on "A velooipede a fellow writes US, Directing
to the cruelty 10 animals probably involved in
the forthcoming goose race. He spells goose
y,lc> .... Went 10 Grifiths ior new boots Yes.
terday. aud asked if they were done. William,
h. I, a.. ~. No .6ar 5a1
ly: No, dem poo's shn't done. but ter pill ish
made ont" We told him We ddnt want the
BIZ, bu. we wanted the 5o2ts. So We left =.
What's John s,olr, finger done W in rag for
Is lie pick poke, or which, ~, isit because he
h,s worn i. Of taxing in ,aoney for y5ods /:
Say, John ....S Saw d green horn from rural.
dom whining because sharpers u. the fair lad
cleaned him gu: o; $50. We sent him 10 anoth.
er who had lost $50. in q similar way; we
thought when the two fools should meet, they
might sympathIle with each other We ought
- sue Justices Lsavens and Graham, for not
would consider it case of drunk and disorder.
ly" and send US up, 50 we'll let en- run their
cour: as they please 80. We were in error about
the Clifton Hotel being $3.50 house. 1t costs
s. per day to live there. NJ. Howard says you
can board there one day aud get three
fourths Of meal next day, $3.50. 5. 1t require.
prodgious noise to grind sausage A mill Of
the "ssssinxer persussion,' on Madison street
makes such a fearfully loud noise that it make,
the windows in the houses rattle four block.
away from it 80. l.. M HOLSTER is 'some" as q
gsrdsnist, when he can have new potatoes on III.
18th Of June as he did this year :. The Fo,
River Valley railroad track has reached tn.
southern limits Of Ottawa and now all aboard
for Streator. Shall Ottawa go to Streator o,
Streator come TO Ottawa, on an excursion, al
soon AS the cars cross the bridge: How is it to b.
Messrs Plumb. Young, Cushman, & Co. ?...
The 4th of July dare not come to Ottawa thi
year. 1t is afraid the council will put $50 Ii
cense upon it Supervisor Ben. NJ. Hethering
ton of La Sale, during the last two weeks, quar-
ried out IRE hHndred yards If stone. himself
. singly ,and alone He challenges every one o
!, the other members of the board to beat him
Come, gentlemen, CT acknowledge Ben to b.
, tho champion rockist. Here is chance for tn
, worthy gentleman from Brookfeld, the tia
gentleman from Mendoza, the wirey representa-
o tive from Allen, or in fact, almost "any othe
man." to show what supervisor can do in al
honest employment -. Joe Watts, last week
sold Norman colt for 5000 to Garvey OF Chi
ago. The colt was Is mos. old, II hands high
and weighed l44 pounds. How's that for high