The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1870-03-31

Se%@J NAo5 "a PhihSs
We 6nd that some of our cotempora.
ries have been condensing larg, mum.
Der of fatal accidents, etc, intoas small
a paragraph as possible, and for the
benefit Of our readers we publish few,
''as they are recommended for their
variety and freshness"
A man in New Han pshire the other day
ate fifteen dozen raw oysters on a wager
the silver trimmings alone on his coffin cost
twelve dollars and thirty five cents.
John Smith, in Nebraska, said he could
handle raitle'snake the same as a snake
charmer the ehurlishuess Of the under.
taker in demanding pay in advance, delayed
the funeral four days.
A circus rider in Texas tried to turn three
somersaults on horseback the other day
the manager sent back to New Orleans the
following day for another somersault man.
A man IN New Jersey couldn't wait for
the cars to get to the depot aud Jumped of;
his widow has sued the Insurance Company.
Few men would attempt to dry dampened
gunpowder in the kitchen stove; a man in
Canada did, and his afflicted family would
be glad Of any information as to his where
abouts.
In Massachusetts the other day man
thought he could cross the track in advance
of locomotive; the services at the grave
were very impressive.
A man warned his wife in New Orleans
not to light thefre with kerosene; she didn't
heed the warning and her clothes fit his
second wife remarkably well.
A boy in Detroit disregarded his mothers
warning not to skate on the river, as the ice
was thin his mother don't have to cook
for SO many as she did, by one.
A playful frolic with knives and reyolvers
| adjourned Philadelphia ball the other
night, and reduced the census by one.
A Charlestown fruit vender settled dis.
pute about few cents by cutting his Gus.
toner's back open.
An Indiana FARMER was rolled out so thin
by saw-log the other day, that he slipped
into the other world instantly.
The gentleman who would I'll q lighted
Kerosene lamp at Baltimore, the other night,
is now in heaven.
The family cat taking a small bite out of
a presented turkey and dying in commissions
Immediately, was what saved an Indiana
family from being strychined to death last
week.
A little creature at Baltimore "gently
breathed her last the other evening. by
upsetting kettle Of boiling water.
A Philadelphia darby boy was frightened
almost to death by pistol in lis hand go.
ing off his playmate was, entirely.
An Ohio gentleman who fattens his dogs
on his neighbors' little girls is getting into
A Pittsburg Transfers tip.cart dumbed
him into eternity last week.
A Jersey boy praetised gymnastics on a
revolving shaft IN factory, with fatal re-.
suits.
A New Yorker made fatal mistake the
other night in trying to enter the wrong
house while drunk ! its owner split his head
with an axe.
A Philadelphia white boy stabbed d darky
in the back the other doy he done muffin
but knock down the boy S sister with brick.
The sliding of bank on Maine pond
took man and team to the bottom, the
other day the wagon was sayei.
A Philadelphia blacksmith struck while
the iron was hot, and put his antagonist S
family into morning.
A blind man in Cincinnati jumped from
high window the other night, into eter.
nifty.
A Washington youth ended his life be.
cause his father didn't like his intended.
AVermont lady, finding tins cold world,
has taken her infant and herself to another,
by means Of strangulation.
A NermoUter has had his head, one arm,
two or three legs and several ribs broken
during the past year, by as many accidents
he consoles himself that there isn't much
of him left to fracture.
An Iowa woman, whose child had beer
whipped in school, interceded for her with
a cheese knife.
Jealousy induced New Y ork girl to bury
her scissors in the neck Of her rival.
A marshal and three negroes killed wa,
the result of Texas socially ball.
Paris green killed Baltimorean the Other
day he wanted to dye, and succeeded.
Card.playiug in San Francisco saloons i
varied by the participants chopping eacl
other up with hatchets and champagne bot
ties.
A st. Louis misunderstanding has beer
settled by one Of the parties shooting hi,
opponent and then himself