The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1870-03-28

1t is customary to speak with derision OF
the tempests which now and then break out
in teapots. From an outside point of con-
temptation these turbulences doubtless seem
trivial, but it is likely that within the teapot
the commotion is tremendous. We do not
usually pay much attention to these circum-
scribed and isolated cyclones, but one of
them has recently summoned our attention.
The teapot in which il RACES is the Revolution,
and the storm is merely breeze among those
women. We will give it little more room
to blow in.
To keep peace among magPies, according to
Paulus SilentiaEius, assures scars but forbids
glory. Doubtless in trying to keep peace
among the women we shall be in similar case.
We don't want glory. If we get scars we shall
at least get them in o generous cause. We
want first to assuage the rancor OF pretty
Miss Phoebe Couzens, a beauteous maiden of
eloauence and wrath who dwells in st. Louis.
She shoots the lances of her resentment from
her citadel by the Mississippi, and they glance
across the continent and are more difficult to
dodge than the arrows of Apollo. Unhappily,
she seeks to transfx one of our correspon-
dents, whom she calls by name and pro-
nounces "girl of immature thought and
idea" Of course we come to the rescue of
the Eastern dove from the talons of the
Western falcon. We beseech Miss Phoebe to
tell us what she means by such language as
this. Has she not yet learned that the ITE-
bune ripens all it shines upon? How, then,
can a correspondent who basks in the full
effulgence of our noontide beams be 'imma-
ture ?" If destiny should reserve for Miss
Couzens the unspeakable distinction OF some
time belonging to our staff of reporters, we
venture the prediction that within six calendar
months even she would be ripper than Smyrna
fig or Maltese cucumber, We have taken
some pains to ascertain the cause of Miss
Couzens' little outbreak of temper. We find
her debut on Eastern platforms recorded in
the Tribune in these lofty phrases of eulogy:-
'Little Phoebe is piquant, sprightly, mode
rately clever, and twenty-six When she is
olderlshe will probably know more" This
generous and unequivocal recognition OF her
personal charms and her latent capacities of
improvement does not appear to have quite
met her views. We are sorry for this
knowledge, the poet says, comes, and wis
dom fingers In the arduous pursuit which
Miss Couzens has chosen she will find use
for all the knowledge which comes to her,
and all the wisdom that fingers with her.
1t certainly would be most ungenerous to
say that she had closed her mental accounts,
and would henceforth learn no more We
find further introduction of Miss Couzens
in the sprightly Washington correspondence
of the Cincinnati Commercial. This CORES
pondent thinks the young lady is about
twenty-one. She is tall and handsome. Her
t'chin rounds out little too much" and
her mouth 'suffers thereby, and exhibits a
tendency to ''dish' O verb of mystery, which
we can neither parse nor interpret Her
complexion is delicate, her eyes glorious, her
hair of raven hue, and her face one of the
most intellectual on which the correspondent
has ever looked. 'When she opened her
mouth, the sweet voice came ringing out like
coins dropped down a many fathomed well.
We are pleased to discover that the lady thus
copiously and gorgeously described does not
consider this correspondent immature in
thought or idea. She says he is ''high toned. "
Well, he is. These are treble octaves of ap-
probation. We don't see how he could have
made them more high toned without going up
stairs. What Burke says of Marie Antoinette
is tame, and the rhapsodies of "Romeo' are
cold in comparison. To be oensured as Sim
mature" by a lady whose chin rounds out in
such an intellectual manner, and whose en-
dowments are so numerous and gracious, is a
very bad business indeed. If she were an
elderly apostle with a false front and visage
of vinegar, her aspersion would not amount
to much. 1t is the privilege of the afternoon
to animadvert upon the morning. But we
don't expect half past to turn upon quarter
past and accuse it of being too early Pitch
into the enemy, abuse the men, call them all
the names which Joe Bagstock called his
native; we will not interpose to protect them.
But if these voluble and reformatory young
women are going to lay lances in rest only to
run tilts at each other, we shall call truce,
have their armor taken from them, and give
them back the distaff instead.
Those who wish we'll to the woman's rights
crusade welcomed the advent of youth and
beauty in the ranks of the crusaders. Wis
dom, and experience, and antiquity of days
are all very we'll, but to carry great re-
formatory movement to successful issue,
they need little of the bright alloy of
sparkling youth and impetuous maidenhood.
Finally they got it. The timorous girls came
forth from silken boudoirs, and shaded gar
dens, and perhaps less luxurious hiding.
places, and from noisy platforms beamed
star-like upon the world. They did not always
bring good grammar with them, and theii
pretty curled heads were not burdened with
much wisdom, but they spoke nice little
pieces, full of adjectives, and exhibited
in all cases the precipitate and sanguine en-
thusiasm of inexperience. good many per-
sons went to hear their little chirrupings who
would not have gone to hear the wiser and
more frumpy elders sound their tremendous
clamor over the roofs of the world. 1t will
be source of genuine regret if the handsome
young recruits exhibit imperfect discipline,
and turn their rhetoric upon each other.
They will injure the cause which they seek to
promote. They will strain their voices and
get their hair out of curl. More persuasion
lies folded in their eurls than is likely to be
won by their logic, SO that their coiffures
should not be subjected to this peril II
they are in earnest, they must subordinate
their resentments chastise their yanities. and
try to make the brains inside their heads