The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1870-10-08
RADICAL MORTUARY PROCEEDINGS.


out thick with genuine case of demon
alisation. The symptoms of this dis
ease have been noticeable for several
weeks, and numerous draughts and
have been employed to
check it's insidious inroads. Various
and sundry physicians, skilled in polit-
ical conjuration, have been from time
to time consulted; but the seeds of
disease had been planted in the body Of
our glorious old party, and no art nor
labor could stay their termination and
growth.
Last Saturday was the fatal day of
prostrat ton for our party, that dear old
party which found so many of us va
grants and outcasts, and made us rich
and powerful politicians, members of
the legislature, sheriffs, judges, &C., in
u land where we were either total
strangers, or home-bred ofice-seekers
whose last trick had been played, and
failed.
The friends of the party (of whom
we were one) met together first at the
Courthouse. happening to us, (speak-
ing collectively that the Courthouse
was too public a place for the trial to
which our poor patient was to be sub
jected, and that many idle and curious
Democrats would inevitably be drawn
thither to aggravate the troubles and
increase the anxiety, it was determined
upon to adjourn our meeting to the
two-story colored schoolhouse, in rear
of town. We all anxiously proceeded
to that quiet neighborhood, and in the
upper-story of the schoolhouse met in
solemn assembly to deliberate upon our
approaching destiny.
While engaged in the preliminary
organization, it was discovered that
there were present, as spectators, q
few who were not delegated to attend
the meeting, among them the Editor
of the TELEGRAPH. This oficious scribe
had insinuated himself so far into the
low, that he had gained footing on
the staircase, and was vigorously Mt
work trying to get the lieutenant who
had charge Of the landing, to let him
in. 1t was therefore moved by Mr..
Jas. Ray, one of the chief mourners
but not a delegate, that the house be
cleared of all but the delegates, which
motion was put and carried.
Our meeting then proceeded, with
locked doors and janitor to watch,
to discuss the grave questions which
had brought us together. We had, as
delegates and proxies, three white men,
viz: M. M. Grady, J. Ennemoser and
G. Austin, teacher of colored pupils.
The first two gentlemen appeared as
contesting proxies for the louisville
ward. To dispose of these wrangling
brethren consumed two or three hours
time. Finally, we admitted Grady
The case of Austin came up for debate.
Not being a voter, it appeared absurd
he should claim to be n mourner Mt our
meeting, and motion was made for
his exclusion.
| Seven Of our number Owe were six
teen) were already sorely grieved ut
what they considered the unfavorablc
symptom manifested in the admission
of Grady in preference to Ennemoser,
and these seven thought they detected
in the nine other mourners an unbe-
coming department they mildly termed
bribery and want of sobriety. 1t was
found finally that the man Austin, who
claimed Il mourner's seat, had the nine
on his side, and they were a "picked
nine' who would not go back on a
friend. Upon a vote, Austin was ad-
mitted as delegate. Thereupon, the
weeping seven, tearing their wool and
filing the air with dreadful impreca-
tons, left the meeting in great anger,
averring they did not care copper if
it went to the "demnition bow vows"
1t seemed to us that their grief and
rage combined would kill them. They
consulted old Bed Quilts, and he too
became like a raging Muscovy drake,
and refused to be comforted.
Meanwhile, the nine proceeded to
make finish Of the party, now so fear
fully near it's final dissolution. First,
they crammed o. H. Brewster down
its throat as Representative No. l, and
then followed the nauseous potion
with Thos. S. Johnson, as Representa-
tive No. 9. to make Brewster stick.