The Plymouth Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1869-1941, 1869-10-21
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

FARMERs insure their lives in the Wash
ingt0n Of New York.
TUE most important part of every mans
education is that which he gives to HIM
self.
A New YORK auctioneer announces for
sale oil paintings BY some of the ancient
masters of the day.
THE reason why piano was not saved
at a fire was because none of the fircmcn
could play on it.
If you would find a great many faults,
be on the lookout If you would find
them in still greater abundance, be ON the
look-in.
WHATS the difference between water
and whisky? Men slip on the former
when it's frozen, and on the latter when
it isn't.
WHAT is the difference between the Ia
bOrs of q farmer and seamstress? One
gathers what he sows, the other scws what
she gathers.
AN Old farmerreportSa very fair growth
of corn in his section this season. He
states that in July it was SO dark between
the rows that he was obliged to carry
lantern to sec to pillow it out.
AN unconscious but comical play upon
words was made by little girl, not long
since, while relating to sympathizing
lady the loss of two pet calves "What
caused their dcath?" said the lady. 40"
was the answer, "Onc was hooked to
death, and the other died on its own
hook"
SAID male advocate woman's rights:
"When | am in crowded car, and lady
comes in, think it is the duty of some
| pf l.ar to nnt nd ix-r hpr
| look around the car TO see if any man in
the crowd looks like making move in
that direction, and when / see them all
keep their seats, hide my face behind my
| newspaper, and blush for my SEX"
A lively New Orleans youth essayed the
role of ghost the other day, and was sound
| ly thrashed by those he attempted to
| frighten. He brought suit for assault
with intent TO kill. "YOu wanted to be
ghost, didn't you?" inquired the Court.
Yes, | reckon So" acknowledged the
youth. "Well, it seems to me rather un-
generous of you to wish to punish them
for helping you to become what you
wished"
SOMEBODY recently played a practical
joke on the officers of the City Hall build
ing, at Lawrence, Kan, by procuring a
black snake, six or eight feet long, which
| had been killed, and coiling it neatly in
side the entrance. 1t repeatedly fright
ened away several parties who come upon
it suddenly, but each returned in force to
! kill it, among the rest "a delegation of the
police force of the place, whose prowcss
was tried in this way by the Sheriff, who
had also been victim. The dead snake
died seven times before its final dissolu-
| ton.
THE following letter explains ITSELF and
does credit to the Company and its hon
Orablc managers
New York, March Is, 1863.
! /. N. SToDDARD, Esq-DEAR SIR
Your favor of the 10th instant is at hand.
| The premium on Mr.. Johnsons policy
| for January was unpaid, and the policy
would have lapscd for non-payment OF
premium, but for our rule of holding
| policies in force while there is any
unused dividend TO its credit This is a
rule peculiar to this company, and its adj
vantage to the policy holder is excmpificd
in this instance. Yours Truly,
NJ. MITCHELL,
Vice Pres't. Washington Life
/ AN exchange has the following anec-
dOte A Traveller, i'm going through a thin
ly settled district of Western Pennsylva-
MIA, passed a tumbledown log cottage on
the roadside, and his attention was at
tracted by long rough pine board nailed
up in the fashion of sign, and bearing in
characters of very primitive fashion, this
inscription:
my wyf queries A Goose
and QUERIES the Gamblers.
Utterly confounded by the mysterious in
timatiOn, he knocked at the door To have
the riddle explained, but the cottage. was
empty. He rode on, greatly perplexed
and trying in vain to divine the peculiar
relation which this singular family ap
pearcd tn have established with geese, and
4 judged of sufficient Importance to pro.
claim thus ostcntltiously Presently he
met an old countryman limping along will
Il stick, and asked him if he knew the
house. . yes; live there with my old
woman" And what do you dog" We'll
you sec my old woman and me are kind
doctors like: she cures the fever nagurs
and cures the janders."