The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1869-07-09
Original 1" Eynress ,,-lons.
D. the wing "-Feathers.

On the wing Feathers.
Sons of Malta" Beerbrewers.
Should an Inspector of Docks be
tried by a jury of his Piers?
The Chinese emigrants in Califor-
MIA are said to be taking it Coolie.
Is hanging about lady's neck in
the least suicidal?
+ Efficient Conductors = Lighting
rods.
Stylish Crockory-Fashion plates.
Fruitful Proclamations - Man
dates.
Drop -curtains-Bar-room shades.
Tight rope performances = Exc
cutions.
Required-The horse power of the
force of circumstances.
Never put the cream of joke in
your coffee.
The way to tire a wheel is to serve
it the same as you do freshly starch
ed shirt-iron it.
Mr.. ShingIe suggests that the place
where Verbune sat is near the spot
where Mill TT. Jes sol
There is said to be man IN Rhode
Island who became bankrupt by trust
ing in Providence.
Newport Is a favorite New England
resort. Old Port is more in demand
In these parts.
Mrs. Plush likes people ofa soft and
tender nature. All the better-if it
extends to their head.
Author, who has led hotel life. is
about publishing work on Inn
eonveniences." "
IF you desire to compose anything
effeciual, begin by composing your
self
Manufacturers of a prominent
article in jewelry are about forming
an association-They will probably
be known as-the Chain-gang."
The man who was wrapt up IN his
own thoughts had a very thin cover
ing, and took a violent cold in conse-
quence.
The difference between dress and
address IS quite considerable. One
draws heavily on the purse-the other
lightly on the manners.
The women's club say they want
principles-not men. The principal
thing, in or out Of clubs, that they
appear to want is-mOney.
Some people have Il name for being
profound because they say nothing.
The bigger the drum the more the
emptiness.
1t is said that Senator Chandler
will go to Greece, where he will
doubtless become tallow chandler.
Wicked Senator!
Running for luck is an uncertain
business, and generally ends in dis
appointment, undue perspiration and /
shortncss Of breath.
Red, white and blue are a nice com
but people often reluctantly /
have too much Of the latter in their |
The Chinese picture of ambition is
q mandarin trying to catch a comet by |
putting salt on its tail.
My first is what lies at the door; my |
what nobody can do without, and my
whole Is one Of the United States.
Mat ri-mony.
Why was the whale that swallowed
Jonah ike retired milkman? Be
cause he got profit (propheO out Of
The water.
We see, said Swift, in one of his
most sarcastic moods, What God
thinks of riches by the people he gives
hem to"
Which are we to ve2-0n one
hand, we are assured that the archi-
.ects consider the Coliseum perfectly
safe; on the other hand, that every
hing on the programme will bring
lown the house.
Speeches are often as good for what
hey DO not contain, as Tor what they
10. Many more men have been ruin
I'd by saying too much than have fail
ed by saying too little.
It is thought that if women were to
get on jurIes bachelors and ugly-lOok-
ng men would stand a poor chance
or getting Justice. But then that is
he very thing they might get, and
What some OF them most deserve.
An English gentleman. having
made a rockwork planted with ferns
n front Of his house. presumed upon
he Ignorance of callers for aims by
posting up this notice: Beegars be-
ware ! Sco1opandriums and polypodi-
inns are set here "
i say Pete. when my little boy git
us hair cut, why ort dat to be regard
ID as great phenomena?
Il don { know, Bill"
Coz it am de 'clipse of de sunI"
Sir" said burly fellow of no en-
liable character, L have the largest
lecll of any man in the city"
Very likely" said his neighbor;
and l saw yesterday the largest rope
n the city, Now, put that and that
ogether, and we'll sec how tall you
re.
If human beings arc but worms as
he piOus folks tell US, a tailor Is, of /
curse, measuring worm-Erpress.
Certainly; and by the same reason
ng, jeweller must be ring worm a
q III