Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1869-03-05
Musical 'Courtsllip -Matrfmony Made
bus s..i.is s'tii u Easy % o~faaGne lt'i} So
BY PHINEAs MARIGOLD, JR.

BY PuINEAS MARIGOLD, JR. n'i-
~ Shakespeare asks, i" What's in q name ?"
shall not atternptto answer that question
at present. am willing to admit, in fact,
that ga rose with any other name aC0utd
smell as sweet" If l should inveigh
against the prevailing musical momencla-
ture of the present day, might be asked
by alarmed music publishers whats in q
title?" To that question l would answer
ns,tch, which i shall endeavor to prove.
Now,I am an enthusiast in musical mat
tiers; have, indeed, passion for music,
especially vocal. My Iachrymal glands,
many time and off," have responded
generously to the melting strains of "LO-
rena," "Thou hast learned to love anoth-
err" ct I'D onaaae genus. My enthusiasm in
this respect recently impelled me to write.
a list of the most popular songs of this
character, and the result OF my researches
set me thinking, land L fatter myself to
some, purpose; buty of that let b candid
world judge.
1t is melancholy fact that many man
brimful of unutterable yearnings y ,drags
out long weary years Of single wretehed-
ness, merely because he lacks the moral
courage to PROFOUND the awful question,
"wilt thou be mine?" or words to that
effect. OF course the legion of anxious
mammas who have eligible daughters to
dispose of. have not failed to observe this
fact. Is it not reasonable to suppose that
they should exert all the innocent craft and
resistless arts peculiar to their sex, in order
to relieve faint-hearted bachelors from the
necessity of popping the question" in
the old orthodox manner, and still relieve
themselves of some of their signing
eligibles?, 4u.e,a nsaialq liza ssa5sim ~
Naturally sympathetic, I could not re
gard this embarrassing and unnatural
state of affairs without feelings of sincere
pity and COMMUNICATION for both parties.
I have revolved many plans for relief, but,
until lately, never originated one that l
regarded as worthy to be presented for
their consideration. OF a'ila +e"h ,iH+@' z! y
l say until lately, for my humane efforts
have at last been crowned with success,
and am now prepared to submit q plan,
the adoption of which will in my humble
opinion, completely revolutionize the
whole institution of modern courtship,
increase the number of yearly marriages
at least twenty-five per cent. and give an
unprecedented impetus to the music trade.
Here, I am aware, many splenetic read
ers of this article will question the dis
interestedness of my " efforts, and even
have the hardihood to hint that,I am in
the employ of clique of music publishers,
and Il blush to write it) am literally paid
for my sympathy y D. 'ia'iii'n1 to Aoojs
Conscious of therectitude of my inten-
tions and the purity of my motives, I
shall take no notice of such ilLnatured
charges, but pass them by, in silent con-
tempt. 3i - ~ . =, '' .
/ shall now endeavor to explain my plan
by simple illustration of its operation
,.One of the unhappy class of timid bach;
elors above referred to is spending the
evening with the object of his. Silent
worship. / say silent, for the peculiar in.
| trinity of his disposition has hitherto
kept him tongue-tied. anxious mamma
is aware of the true state of affairs; so il
her dutiful daughter. The former has
urged that affairs be brought to crisis this
very evening, and it is go decreed. =
Gushing Damsel innocently proposes thai
they examine a collection of vocal music
she has recently made. Enamored Swain
gladly assents. Gushing Damsel hands hin
collection of sheet music Carefully ar
ranged), and taking smaller collection
herself, the interesting scene, SO big with
fate" begins. y 8sle d-O4
Gushing Damsel (reading title of song)
"Pm lonely to night" Gin a sad, melan
choly voice). 81 ~. .,'. ..,
Enamored Swain (also reading from hi
collection).3 "Why?1'
G. D. (reads). mo one to love-" I'm
creased sadness, with addition of Sigh
tremor in voice. A powerful appeal t.
i all the latent sympathies of his nature)
EE. s. (reads). "Why no one to love p
! (E. s. here experiences slight choking
sensation in his throat. Has a vague
apprehension that something is going tt
happen involving the destruction OF
confirmation of long cherished hopes
C. d. {reads) Ask me not why p
Delightfully."- confused and fiuttering voice
followed by gentle sigb.) IN
E. S. J(reads9. "Dost thou ever think o
me?" Qs impressed with the idea thu.
he has at length asked the very ques
ton, he had thousand times before re
. solved to ask, but-hadn't) a I
/ Ii G. d. (reads). 81 would not have vol
know" (Charmingly evasiye and provok
| ingly non committal.)
E. S. (readsl. "Will you come to NEE
me?" This starts the perspiration. E
S. begins to feel homesick. In fact, he ha
strong presentiment that his materpa
parent desires a personal interview will
him at thatvery moment.) 49,
G. ID. (reads). "Ill wait st the gate TO
theen That's sensible, and to the point.
e. s. (reads). "Meet me at the tWiligh
hour" How often has he longed to max
that very request)
G. D. (reads). Be sure you call as vol
i -,acc - fIUhak NOVA ao,,l1 Lo l. 0N