Memphis daily appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1847-1886, 1869-12-10
Courteous Manners.

At a recent meeting of the member:
of the Mechanics Institute at Dews
bury, England, Mr.. john 4. kOebuck
NJ. p. for Sheffield, delivered an ad
dress containing sentiments vel
worthy of consideration, and of self
applications by Others than those tC
/ whom they were uttered. 1t should
I be promised that his audience consist
ed of working men, mostly operatives
/ engaged in WOollen factories, which
are the staple Of the industry of DeWs-
/ bury, a town in Yorkshire, containing
over eighty thousand inhabitants.
/ The fact that his hearers were men,
bers of the Institute, proves that they
( were to a certain extent educated, or
( desirOus Of becoming so. 1t may be
! that some of them were ambitious of
raising themselves TO better
social condition, for it was
to such that Mr.. ROebuck's
observations were mainly addressed.
He advocated the idea that a working
man should seek education, for the
purpose OF making himself happy in
his own sphere OF lie, instead OF seek
ing higher sphere. Such a doctrine
will appear strange to the millions
who live by the labor of their hands
in this country, where there are no le-
gal, and few social, obstacles to a
mans raising himself to prominence,
and where countless instances of sue
cessful efforts to achieve distinction
are to be met with. Yet there is sense
in the reason assigned by Mr.. Roe
buck for aiming rather at domestic
happiness than at political eminenGe.
Successful public distinction can be
acquired only by the comparatively
few, while social ease and respecta-
bility are open to all who take the
proper course TO obtain them.
Those who value the repOse Of life
rather than its struggles will prefer
to arrange their line OF action SO as to
secure the elements Of enjoyment and
cultivation which it offers, instead of
restlessiy pushing forward into some
other. The idea tnat there is come
thing ignODle IN this acquiScence
ought TO be discarded. When IL does
not form an excuse for apathy and in
dOlence, il often displays a higher
order of intelligence and character,
and truer sense of what Is essential
TO happy existence tnan is enter
tanned by those whose aims and ideas
are absorbed in the problem of how
10 rise in the world,
But one of the prime conditions Of
happiness in any sphere, especially
social and domestic, is the cultivation
of refined and gentle manners. There
N no reason why a man who has TO
toll all day and live by the labor of
his hands should be coarse and rough
with those with whom ne is thrown
in contact. RudeRes5 does not make
friends on the contrary, it alienates
both friendship and love. There is
such a thing as a man being too rude
with those nearest and dearest to
him, and thus lowering himself
in their eyes. There are thou
sands Of men in this country
who have not yet learnt how much
happier they would be in their fami-
lies if they were kind, gentle and
and daughters. Scarcely a day passes
without the newspapers recording in
stances Of gross ill-treatment commit
ted by men upon their wives, even to
the extent OF murder. Ii will prob
ably be long before we shall be free
from these occurrences. But there
is much domestic misery and dis
cord which does not come before
the public, and much of this is
Occasioned by coarse manners, and
indulgence in low, sensual tastes.
If good manners could take the place
of these, how different would the case
be, and how much happier-nay,
richer in q peouniary sense, would
such families find themselves, PO-
liteness is the cement of society, 1t
is singular that it should be found
among savages as much as among
civilized nations. SavageS," saws
the Shepherd in one Of the NOctes
AmbrOSiGnG, "as far as manners are
concerned, are your only gentlemen.
Who ever heard tell Ola Red Indian
takin' the word out O'your mouth, or
cOntradickin' ye In a loud voice, or
tellin' you that you were an ignO-
ramuse Nae Red Indian, whether
Cherokee or IrOquOis, OF Mawhawk,
ever disgraced himself by lnsultin'
you in that gate" 1t may be that
fear OF the tOmahaWk from each other
or of the rife from the white man
may have produced this politeness,
and it has become inherent, just as
the practice Of duelling made gentle
men punctilious toward each other.
There is a considerable amount of
native politeness among the French
workmen and the Irish peaSantry, but
it is lamentably wanting among the
uneducated classes of England. AS
the latter become possessed of political
power they will probably learn more
and more to respect themselves and
each other, and 1t Is the consciousness
Of the possession of this power in its
fullness that makes the mass of our
native population forbearinga and cOur-
teOus. Their education, too, has much
to do with it, and in this respect they
have marked advantage over their
less fortunate brethren in Europe.
There are many in all ranks who may
become gentle by culture, and be
trained 10 respect themselves and
Others. When they have learned this
they will carry into their homes the
temper which they have been induce d
to form, and acquire the demeanOr
which it is proper ~ exhibit OF doors.