The weekly clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1863-1882, 1869-03-11
GETTING MARRIED.
HOW IT LOOKS TO THE BRIDEGROOM
WHEN THE DAY HAS BEEN FIXED.
From the London Leader.

From the London LEADER
The prospect of marriage, like relig-
ion, exercises, as rule, very sooth-
/ ing influence upon the mind. OF
| course, we all know that religion
| sOothes human nature down into a
! kind of spiritual sickness, which is
| always enviable, and not alwas attain
| able, even oy the devouU; but why the
| prospect of marriag should always pro-
duce a calming effect is not easily con-
| jectured, at all events; by those who
want the knack of knowing how to
reconcile experience with Imagination.
The truth, we suppose, must be that a
man becomes resigned when once his
| married days have been fixed. He is
conscious that the event is inevitable.
The pleasing perturbance of the period
of cOurtshipis at an end.
In little while he feels that YOU
shall see his name under the births and
before the deaths. The sense of duty
of looking happy and feeling pleased
is upon him. He does not shrink at
the condition of premeditated matri-
mony. He is very anxious to look
happy, and when congratulated at
every turn by his friends, processes
himself very much pleased. But he is
not pleased, and he is not happy. A
6OOu dCol VI 10
the constant contemplation of the day
that is inevitable. Many dubious re-
Elections upon the minute concomi-
tants of marriage annoy him. He will
have, first OF all. to get married; that
is to say he Will have to stand buttoned
up in frock coat some twenty min
utes or more-heaven send that the
bride doesn't want a choral seryicei
before a clergymen, subject to the
prying chances of his dear relatives
and friends assembled to witness. and.
by their presence, to solemnize, if you
will, the service.
Then he will have to receive the
congratulations of every body in the
vestry-roOm-a terrific ordeal. Then
he will have to walk down the church,
amidst the whispering and wondering
gaze of rows of strangers who have
strolled into the church to witness the
proceedings. Then he will have to
push his way through a crowd of
gaping children, nurses and perambu-
lators, into his carriage. All this kind
of thing is delightful to women, but
to men. and to nervous men in partic- |
ular, it is one of the greatest deter |
mems TO marriage. But the bride |
groOm's misery does not end with his |
getting into the carriage. The silly |
anu lOOIlldu hive eIcuns- |
bered themselves with enormous con- |
spicuous favors, and he is dragged |
through the streets, creating almost as |
much wonderment as a new lord |
But all this is trifing, compared to
what is to follow. Ifthe bride lives in |
q square he has the satisfaction of |
seeing the neighboriug balconies
crowded to catch glimpse of them /
entering the house. If she lives in a |
street, the windows are filed with |
heads, while servants grin through the |
area ratings and crack many horrible
jokes if there are a few men about. If |
she lives in the country, a band of |
binds and yokelS jOStle each other
about the gateway and raise hoarse
cry of welcome when the carriage
stops. One would think that matri-
mony was a new invention, and that
this marriage was the first experiment.
After the bridegroom has gone
gracefully through the ordeal of being
courtesied to by several of the servants
of the house, whose faces are inflated
with the various congratulatory ex-
preSsions, he has again to endure the
of hands and the spasmodic |
assurances of good wishes that follow
the arrival of the rest of the party.
Then comes the breakfast. A wretch |
ed old lady, who has been an intimate
friend of his family for twenty years,
strives for long time unsuccessfully
to catch his eye; when caught, she ex-
claims in loud voice that she expects
great things from him, when he re-
turns thanks. Hang her! He sits in
9 reat misery, trying to look uncon-
cerned and cheerful, waiting for the
when the father of the bride
shall DrODOSa their bPalthS
Why are not these detestable we'd
ding breakfast speeches banished
The rising OF the father is always pre-
ceded by some moments silence, |
Every body sympathizes with every
body else. The thin man at the head
Of the table is sallOw, and his eyes are
bleared. Nervousness has wroght this
unpleasant effect. He knows he will
have to return thanks for the brides
maids, and more than once he inquiries
of himself what he has done
10 merit his present suffering. The
father of the bridegroom is thought
full and pale. He is meditating his re-
ply to the toast proposed to tile health
IF his wife and himself. There is in
Unite expectation among the women,
and much dread among the men. But
the bridegroom is the most miserable
Just now. He knows that when he
rises he will not only have to address
those whom he can see, he will have to
address also whom he can't see.
Servants liner behind the door to
criticise the defamation of the hus-
band of their young lady. Walters
stand behind, petrified by his ab-upt
and nervous rising into immovable
statues, holding glasses and bottles of
champagne. They know their BUSH
ness, do these attentive myrmidons,
and will listen with the the most en-
barrassing silence. But even when
the bridegroom has made his speech
his misery is not over. When the bride
retires to change her dress. all the gen
,lemen cluster about him and renew
heir congratulations, made elamorous
BY the inspiring presence of cham
payne. Then he is to say goodbye.
The brides little brother sets up
howl at the loss of his sister, which no
promise of pantomimes at Christmas
ind boxes of conjuring implements
IAN silence. The mother-in-law Is
lesolated; she has been crying ever
since five in the morning, and faints
away in the arms of a sympathetic old
friend. who entreats her to be calm, in
her Christian name, when the bride
gives her farewell kiss. The father
wipes his eyes with the napkin which
ne has carried with him from the
breakfast table. Amid misery and /
congratulations the bridegroom de-
parasitic most miserable of the party,
he least of all to be Congratulated.
No wonder the contemplation of this
kind of thing sobers man. No won
Ter an element ofsadness and logged
ness pervades the actions and language
IF him whose marriage day has been
liked. He is sobered by contemplated
Frankly, we pity the
nan who is going to be married. We
cannot extend the same compassion to
young ladies. They can stand any
amount of tears, of scrutiny, of
nysteria, of speeches, and the waving
Of fans. But man, though not born to
be single, was not born to endure the
evils that attend the ceremony of get
ting partner. He has to thank society
for these evils. Yet we shrewSiIv sus- |
pect good many more men revenge |
themselves upon society by not getting
married at all than is dreamt OF in the
philosophy of those who imagine that |
going to be married is one of the most