Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1869-03-24
Nashr,s FareNen to johnson.

ana composed. ..
''Weep my friends !" sed he, weep
L can't blame goo, for goo are dbOlr
to be deprived of me! But in thi:
tryin hour 1 will be calm. 1 hey
swung around the entire circle Wv
offishel honor. I hev bin
At this pint his voice trembled and
his eyes wuz suffoosed.
"But no. I will be myself. Seke-
tary Seward, is there any more acts
Nv unconstitOoshenl Congress tc
veto ?"
"No-poekitin Nv en- ansers the
purpose"
"fs there anybody to pardon?n
"No one-but stay. Now that j
think NV it, two counterfeiters, one
whisky speeulator, q COnfederit Off
Ger or two, and waits left NV the assas-
sinashen party still languish either in
Basteels or in exile"
81 must finish my work. Hand
me them blank pardons."
He wrote with a firm hand, fillin
Nv em out, wich only took a second,
ez he hez blanks printed for all the
various offences men kin be guilty
Nv.
"Now, then, my dooties is accom-
plished, and cheerfiy resine the pow
er wich 1 wood hev laid down long
ago but for the sake NV my bleedin
country. wood hev saved my ma
tive land but.-Enuff. Admit our
friends"
Mayor Munro NV Moo Orleens, Mrs.
Cobb, a score or more NV Confedrit
officers and a flood NV unforchenet
men who had been accoosed NV tam
perrin with an uneonstoOshnel curren-
cy, and a hundred, more or less, NV
Fedral offis-holders filed in and shook
the President corielly by the hand,
droppin a silent tho elokent teer ez
they passed. There wuZ, in addish-
en- to these sevral hundred poor
wretches who had bin layin about
Washington for months waiting for
posishens, but who hedn't got en-
They he'd no money to get home with,
and they insistid that the President
must and shood furnish em MEANS
One NV EN- demanded Nv Randall
$500, but that great man finally got
rid NV him by loaning him clean
shirt and box NV paper collars.
Then came the most saddest scene
NV all. The President he'd to bid adoo
to his Cabinet.
''My tried and trusted friends" he
commenced, when Randall broke in
with the onfeelin remark that he'd
better say ''trusted friends" without
the "tried."
''My liege your tried friend wuz in
that gang NV eounterfeiters wieh jist
left the presence. They wuz not only
tried but convicted"
Secretary Seward wuz vizably af-
fected. That afternoon he had heered
Nv an Island for sale, the principal
volcano on wieh he'd mostly stopped
gushin, and he wept to think he
hedn't time to complete negotiashens
for it. 1t wuZ offered for S20, ,00O, 900,
and he considered the price a mere
bagetelle.
Secretary Welles wuz the only
cheerful one in the party. Hehed no
idea that he wuz to stop bein Sekre-
tary NV the Navy-he expected to go
along ez tho nothin had happened
Seward and Randall he'd bin tryin for
an hour to make him comprehend the
sitOOashen-that ther wuZ to be a
change-but to no purpose. He Good
ent get it thro him. / undertook to
impress it into his intelleck but my
efforts wuZ futile. Huggin to his
buZZum model NV Erie canal boat
witch he he'd determined to remodel
into a revenoo cutter, he kept on say
shood / go out? 1
wuz under Linkin and then johnson.
There aint no more difference between
Linkin and johnson than there is be-
tween johnson and Grant, is there ?
I agreed with Linkin and with John
son, and l shel agree with Grant,
doubtless. Why shood differ with
Grant?n
"I'm rooined man." said Ran
dali, ''but I'm eZ much too blama-ez
700 are. I shell go into histry coupled
with yoO-my bloomin boys when
they arrive at mans estate will apply
to the Legislashers NV their respective
States to hev their names changed to |
suthin else. Pm young and can't |
die in a few yeerz eZ Welles kin, and /
must therefore drag out q longer eggs |
but / don't blame yoo. 1 |
went into it taken the chances, and 1 |
stand the hazard NV the die. l shell |
serve the ambishus youth Nv this /
ez an Awful Eggsample." !
The members Nv the late Admins
.rashun hev not decided wat to do
Browning will probably 60 into q
claim agency in Moo York. Randall
remarkt that eff Sammy Cox and Jack
Rogers Good succeed in Moo York, he
thought he Good. Mrs. Cobb will go
% Moo York, and probably the par
lon brokers, lobbyists, and sich will
10 likewise. A dozen or two faro
ranks packed up to-nite, and others
will speedily follow em. In cOnsek-
.nce Nv this breakin up in the Admin
stratiOn and its supporters, the pO-
eece force NV Washington heZ bin
already lessened.
1 shell accompany the late President
o Tennessee, and take my leave Nv
lim then. He will want some faith
ul friends to console him in that drea-
y passage, and who so fit for the offs
z the undersined7 / shell see him
in Greenville, and then
adly turn my steps to Kentucky, and
wait the ishOo of evenee I shell, Nv
,ourse, be turned out NV offs, and
vat will follow / know not. A. J.
nay conclood to stump Tennessee for
he GovernOrship, ez Brownlow hez
he paralysis; if so, I shal go to his
escue. / can't now 60 to Moo York,
or that city will be overrun. With
Randall, and the thous-
nd who go out NV offs with em, in
hat city, wat chance wood there be
or me?
PETROLEUM Y. Massey, P. NJ.
(Which is Postmaster.)
P. S.-The press wich is now sub
idized is animadvertin upon ex-Presi-
ent johnson for not appearin at the
His Eggsleney pre-
erred to avoid the display. ''Let ,
frant start fair" he nobly sed, ''I will I
Iot mortify him by given the throng
7ich hes fiocked here to pay tribOots
" respeck to me an oppOrtoonity to /,
Iurrah for me eZ the procession pas :
es. 1 hev swung around the entire
ircle NV offishel honor and kin afford [
D be magnanimous. Let him hev ,
he entire credit NV wat enthusiasm {
manifested" Good anything be ,
lore noble? p. V. n. ]
90 Expensive a Watch for a Railroad
President.
rom the Bridgeport Conn standard. Mar. 8
A y -