Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1869-10-08
Mark Twain and the indians.

Mark Twain hns been among the In
dians" at Niagara, with queer results. AT
ter giving an account Of interviewing q
squaw and full grown warrior with dis
satisfaction, he says:
/ made one more attempt to fraterniZe
with them, and only Ona. | came upon n
camp of them gathered IN the shade Of a
great tree. making wampnm ana mecca
sins, and addressed them in tho Language
Of friendship
"Noble red men, braves grand sachems,
war chiefs, sqnawa, and high y-u- muck a.
mucks, the pale face from the land of the
setting sun greet yoa You, Bencficent
Polecat-you, Devonrer OF Mountains
you, Roaring Thundergnat-you, Bully boy
with the glass eyo-tho paleface from be-
yond tho great waters greets you all !!
War and pestilence have thinned your
ranks and destroyed yonr once prond na-
ton. Poker, seven-up and a vain modern
expense Of soap, unknown to your glor-
ious ancestors, have depleted Yonr pnrSoa
Appropriating in yonr simplicity the pro
porty Of othors, has cotton you in tronblc.
Misrepresenting facts, in your sinless in
nocence, has damaged your reputation
with the soulless usnrper. Trading for
forty-rod whiskey to enable you to get
drunk and happy and tomahaWk your
families, has played the everlasting mis-
chief with the picturesque pomp of your
dress, and here you are, in the broad light
of tho nineteenth century, gotten up like
the ragtag and bobtail of the purlieus of
New York! For shame! Remember your
ancestors! Recall their mighty deeds !
Remember Uncas!-and Red Jacket -
and Hole-in- -the-day!-anl Horace Gree
leyi Emulate their achievements! Unfnrl
yourselves under my banner, noble cav.
ages lllustrious guttersnipes -
"Down wild himr'
Scoop the blagyard''
Hang him."
"Burn him!'
"DhroWned himp'
1t was the quickest operation that ever
was simply saw sudden flash i'll the
dir of clubs, brickbats fists, broad baskets,
and moccasins-a single flash, and they
all appeared to hit me ut once, and no two
of them in the same place. In the next
instant the entire tribe was upon me-
They tore all the clothes of me, they
broke my arms and legs, they gave me a
thump that dented tho top OF my boot till
would catfee like saucer, and to crown
their disgraceful proceedings and add in.
suit to injury, they threw me over Horse.
shoe Fall, and got wet.
remains of my vest caught on a projecting
rock, and was almost drowned before
could get loose. I finally fell and brought
up in world of whito foam at the foot ol
the fall, whose celled and bubbly masses
lowered up several inches above my head.
OF course got into the eddy. [ sailed
round and rclnd in it Al times-chasing 6
| chip, and gaining on it-each round trip
| half mile--reaching for the same bust
on the bank a. times, and just exactly
missing it by hairs breadth every time
! At last man walked down and sat dowl
| close to that bush, and put pipe in his
| mouth, and light q match and followed M
with ono eye and kept tho other on tht
match, while sheltering in his hand from
! the wind. Presently puff of wind blew il
out The next time [ swept around ht
| said
"Got match ?"
"Yes-in my other vest. Help mo out
please"
8" Not for joe"
When I came round again said
Excuse the seemingly impertinent cu
riosity of q drowning man, but will yor
explain this singular conduct of yours ?"
| "With pleasure. l am the coroner
! Don't hurry on my account. can Wal
for you. But wish had matoh."
| 1 said Take my place, and I'll 60 ant
get you one"
He declined. This lack of confidence OF
his part created GOODNESS between us, ant
| from that time forward avoided him. l
was my idea, in case anything happened t.
me, to so time the occurl ence as to throw
my custom into the hands of the Opposi
ton coroner over on the American side.-
At last policeman came along and arrest
ed me for disturbing the peacesby yelling
at people on tho shore for help. The iudg'
fined me, but had the advantage of him
My money was with my pantaloons, ant
my pantaloons were with the Indians.
Thus escaped. I am now lying in
very critical condition. At least. 1 am ly
ing, any way-critical or not critical.
[ am hurt all over, but [ cannot toll tn
full extent yet, because the doctor is no
done taking the inventory. He will max
ont my manifest this evening. However
thus far, he thinks only six Of my wound
are fatal don't mind the others. Upol
regaining my right mind [ said
1T is an awfnl savage tribe of Indian
that do the bead work and moccaains TO
Niagara Falls, doctor. Where are the
from?'
"Limerick, my son."
| l shall not be ahlo to finish my remark
abont Niagara Falls until [ get better.
At A. Il. Stewarts store in Nav Yor
twenty So, 600 shawls have been sold thi
season, and one worth S. 700.
Over 10000 people have LETT Havan
since the Cuban revolution began, an
there are said to be 10000 vacant house
in that city.
All English druggist proposes that, il
addition5 to the word poison, the Ia
bells on the bottles or packages containing
poison should have printed on their mar
gins the appropriate antidote for each elias
of poison.
| A Rangoon fishermen put fish betweel
his teeth to hold it better while he fxe
his tackle, but the fish spasmodicall
jumped down his throat, caught fast ther
aud atrangled him to death.
Chicago calls a coroner's inquest IRE
pleving corpse .-
Washington is put down as 3,l77 mile