Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1869-05-21

than a month ago, have made up and
remarked.
When a public clerk is removed
from his position in Washington, he
is now said to be "retrenched."
A New York paper says that the
very purest milk that can be obtain
ed in that city contains fully one
third water.
Prentice says he tries to be impair
tial, but for all that he Is unable to
look on the negroes except on the
dark side.
There is a place in Missouri so So
luxurious that the word grandfather is
nobody ever living long
enough there to become one.
Philadelphia threatens an anti.but'
ter league to continue until butter
comes down in price. 1t now brings
from IS cents to 81 per pound.
Josh Billings says that if man
proposes to serve the Lord, he likes
to see him do it when he measures
corn as we'll as when lie hollers glory
hallaluyer.
The Ohio legislature has passed O
law making it penitentiary offense
for any one who is not a male white
citizen to vote at any election held
under the laws of that State.
President Grant is said to be Of the
opinion that "men educated to mill
tary life are illadapted to being
thrown upon the world to secure a
living in any other profession"
A richly dressed lady stopped q boy
trudging along with a basket, and
asked, my little boy have you got
religion ?n mo, ma'am," said the
1--WE got potatoes.
Rats and mice will not board long
i'm corn crib odorous with the fumes
of coal or gas tar; neither can they
be happy among sheaves of oats
sprinkled with wood ashes.
In presenting q cane to lawyer in
a brother attorney assured
the reel pient that the gift came from
friends "around the tendrils of whose
hearts his image was inseparable wo-
ven.n
A disconsolate husband OF Lyons,
France, whose wife had deserted
him, sent ten barrels of flour to the
pious poor of the city, soliciting
their prayers that the truant might
not return.
Beecher, I'm q late No. of the Church
Union of New York says the "Trini-
ty" is a subject that is dangerous to
NEEDLE with. He thinks boy preach
ers and priests should let it alone -
We consent.
"There is no place like home" says
the poet. How about those young
men who are out seven nights in the
week to see your girls? Or do you
20 upon the principle that sits home
where'er the heart is"
No sooner was the fact known thai
the grand prize in the Hamburg lot
terry had been won by registered
prostitute, than she received twent.
offers of marriage, which sh
promptly declined.
A Frenchman brought two mug
to the milkman in place Of one, a
usual, and on being asked the mean
ing of 1t, replied: "Dis vor de milcl
and dis vor tie water an will mi!
them 20 as to soote myself"
The New Orleans Times think
there is nothing remarkable in tin
fact of the young woman in DE
moines, Iowa, apprenticing hersel
to timer, considering woman
proverbial love for soft solder"
The following is commended to tn
notice of Mrs. Stanton: "Prisonel
why did you follow this man, an
beat and kick him so shamefully?
AZ am sorry, Your Honor; was
little drunk, and 1 thought 1t wa
my wife,"
The editor. of a New Haven pape
is called by contemporary "mor,
hyena, who would unhearse the dea
for means to Witty the living, an
whose foul and fostering tongue drip
with gall and aquafortis. The eS
cuse for this complimentary outpoul
ing is that ait is part of the econo
my OF nature to castigate moral mon
sters."
A country paper, misquoting
writer in the ReUolution says: sc
stately Mrs. Stanton l am filled wit
admiration, and should love to sc
her side by side with Daniel Webste
and Henry Clay" AS both thes
eminent gentlemen are lying severa
feet under ground, it is hardly to b
supposed that the writer had an,
such grave meaning.
The Ratchet with which Georg
Washington cut his fathers cherr.
tree, has been, since the death of tn
General, in the possession of tn,
Washington Lodge of Masons, i'm AL
exandria, but was presented by then
recently, to the Alexandria Museum
If Barnum was new in the business
he would secure for his show the Ii,
which George couldn't tell when h,
cut the tree.-Detroa Tribune.
Manton Marble is constructing |,
private telegraph wire from tn,
World Office to his residence on Fifth
avenue. The editor of the Agric,k
turist has wire running to his hous,
at Flushing, Long Island, so that ht
can communicate with his co-labor,
ers in the city without leaving hi.
study. A Wall street banking firm
has a private wire running to {
branch house in Philadelphia. This
application of telegraphy is destined
to be widely made in time.
A young man seated at dinner, the
other day, said to his wife:
ELLEN, if you are good at guessing
here Is conundrum for you: If the