Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1869-01-22
Biged Grows FOoler and FoOIer.

BiSed Grows FOOler and FOOIer.
I'VE never viii get our foot in again by attering the
vanity Of aspiring josey by asking him to WRITE.
This matter # personal acquaintance Is PLAYED and
BIGED i instructed that if he wants to shine toward
Immortality in the JouRNA :, he must first take
trilgent 10 curb his verbal tiauhea. Your re too
long, BIGED-l
I'm immor.alized And what of it. /
haven't done all myself; the benignant edi
tors of the PREscoTr JOURNAL have done it TO
mel | repeat il, sirs, as emphatically as ever
Pa. Henry or Pat. anybody else ever repeat
ed the proposition 10 fight I'm immortal d.
led, and YOU have done it 10 me Herce-
forth the name BlGED shall stand forth en-
blazoned as in halo OF light,
= One of the few. the immortal names,
That were not bora to de-
I've seen it, in type 50 plain and print so
clear subscribed to n article of my own up
getting that he who reads may run and the
wayiariug man who wouldn't know twas
my thing, would indeed be as big a fool as
yOur PREDATORY remarks pom it charge me OF
being. withal. But | don't care for your
squil's jecrish nor your jeers squibbish. so
long as YOU give me cl auce 10 spread N.Y.
self in your columns. O, gentlemen. have
Ierused and scIutinized my thing in your is
sue of the 18th nstantimo, winch / received
Tonight. some six or seven times each time
with feelings akiner and akiucr to those of
Sinbad. the Sailor, when gazing into the VAL
lev of Misunderstanding. 10 see how
rich it Is With emotions like those of
Young mother. when she feels the vital breath
of her first horn. That is. s'pose so-tho
never was very young mother myself
But quote tie figgcr of peoch from HAL
LICK, who doubtless once Y as--as he is ac-
kuowledgcd to have been a perfect Old Gram
uv when he was Gcncral-in- Chief at Wash
neton. And how oould he ever have become
an old Granny without once having been a
youl mother, and before that young dam
81, AMI perhaps a dam youag-scH2
Even as a schoolgirl bedoozies witlrtcars of
joyful pride The village paper containing her
Lines to Jfon .imi'-which is her lover
As Diocletian pointed TO the cabbages he had
reared, even with as much piide pointed |
to it
Tilton and Bonner may go to thunder with
all the rest o those fellows who have been
mak.r g light (Cor their pipesl of my MSS.
have no further favors to ask of them. If
The one thinks essays on the Evidences of
Christianity, and the other gossippy. goosey
accounts by Grants garrulous old father, OF
Il.
while watering his colt. (Which was wild and
didn't like TO be forced To drink are better
reading matter than the profoundest cogita-
tions of my active brain.-then let 'em keep
consent to ''let en- or not). But, my or
gan is found and Diogeres hunting in his
shirt-tail with lantern for an honest man,
could never have been more reioiced in run
ming ker-bunt against Abraham Lincoln,
than was to- night on opening the PREscoTr
JOURNAL. That paper is mine By it |
henceforth swear. lis opinions are my opin-
ion ITS candidates shall receive my suffer-
iRqs; I'm converted 10 WAsHBURN for Sena-
tor already , and all IFS dogmas shall be my
dogs. ] knooe it is a good organ. and its edi-
tors apprcciators of native talent-for l write
for it myself. and I'm Native.like joey Bag
stocks Man Friday and every other day in
the week all the year round. My maiden
how is ma lie to the public-or wonld be if
my head were the head of maiden. witch it
amt not much. And. as aforesaid. hcnceforth
my name shall shine forth emb'azoned i'm a
halo OF glory like Moses lettering in burn
ing bush. along with those mighty trainers of
public sentiment. james Parton. Harriet
Beechers Toe. aud Leroy Gates. And as
squat to write the pre-accepted essay on Mat
rimony. 1 feel as though l should burst with
plide and inspiration. and by crimus, shall
and slop over into it, unless l begin.
MATRlMoxY.
The word was evidently taken, like Holy
Writ, out of the Original Tongues. and its
modern Specification may be translated A
Matron with Money. Else she'd scarce be
worth having. 1t was invented by Adam
and Eve. whose little family jars would indi-
cate the system to have been so imperfect that
the commissioner refused them Letters Pat
ent on it, so that it has been freely INDUCED
! i'm. more or less, ever since some 1904 wears
previous to B. c., and not much less since
previous after that era. Some people still
practice the system more than they ought,
and some less, for the good OF their offspring.
Show me the American citizen now who fails