Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1869-09-22

hNofu Ilo %. Y MS roI,'y tInS. - lEtiieS
and gentlemen 5 sword is the proudest
day of my exist nee!
when men break their hearts," re-
marks a cynical female wIiter, sit is the
same as when lobster freaks one OF IL
claws other sprouiing out Immediately
and growing IN It's place.
An incoriigiblo wag, who lcr minis
ter n horse which ran away and threw his
clerical liter, thought he shonld have some
credit for his aid IN spreading the Cos
pei.
"A tiresome talker once said to n pub
lie man ne had incontinently bored. can
oyster is pleasant TO eat, though repulsive
TO look at. YES but then ho knows
when TO shutup, was the reply.
An oil millionaire's daughter at S,.,a-
toga sings two songs night and day hli siis
knows. The old man says he paid 81, 900
TO learn her music, and she's got 20 sing oT
bust.
"A girl Mt Kansas City had six offors of
marriage within month, and hot month,
too. II is supposed TO be on account at
her frigidity.
Two French frlonds met "Ah. good
day How are you - '.Prctiy we'll" "And
your wiie?" '-She is travelling. "For her
health Z mo, Tor mlle.
"A white boy met q colored la.. the other
day, and asked him what no had suci, a
short nose for 81 spect 50 il won't poke
itself into other peoples business"
"A Pennsylvania farmer writes 10 his
country paper tAat he curad his daughter
of the Grecian bend 10y pouring water on
her and holding her out in the sun until
she warped back again.
-'Why lon't you limit yourself?" said
physician to an intempe5Tlte porson. ''sSet
down Il stake that yoU will SO far and no
farther 81 do" replied tho other; 'but
1 set 1T so far off that 1 always get drunk
before get to it,"
-"Ma, said little urchin. peepmg
from beneath the bed-clothes, II am cold,
I want some moro cover on the bed. Lie
still, my DEAR" said the mother, until
Your sister comes home from church; she
has got the comforter for bustle.".
Are these fresh eggs2"
"Yes, madame"
Show do you know You speak SO pos,
itively."
"Why, l lGil them in that box myself
early this morning"
"A couple of fellows, who were protty
thoroughly soaked with bad whisky, cot
/
for "a few minutes, one of then said, Jim.
let's 60 to another house; this hotel leaks
from below"
An intelligent gentleman from Ger
many, on his frs visit 10 al American
| church, had q contribution box with n hole
Iii the top presented to him, and whispered
to the collector, 'I don't got nein bapcrs,
and can't vote.
An Irishman, being asked by lis angry
master what he did 20 the dog every day
to make him cry ont es If cruelty treated.
''Cruelly trait him. Yer bonorf moi
mover could hurt poor dumb cfatur in ray
life; but yer honor bade me cut bis tail,
and so | cut only q litiio bit OIL every day
TO make it more aisy for hIm."
The other day in Schenectady, an o.d
lady with two bandboXes IN her arms oanne
to the track of the Central Railroad .iiid
inquired Mt what time tho next train was
due. On being informed that If would pass
through the city in half ar hour, size quietly
dumped her bandboKes on tho pavement
and sat down. remarking thai she'd wait
till il passed; she didn't want to be rn
over, aud body couldn't be too keeriil.
DIR. e., OF Sycamore, H., is capital
hand at a joke. Riding in the country one
DAY, he saw n sign upon n gate-post read
ing thus: ''This farm for Sail" stopping
IS horse, he hailed a little old woman who
stood on tip-toe hanging out clothes. II
say, madam. when is this farm going to
'sdag"
''Just 20 soon sir" replied the old lady,
J placing her thumb to her nose, ''as any
body comes along who can raise the wind =
! The Doctor drove thoughtfully On.
CLERK, said a tall Koutuckian to n Io-
tel official, ''this young woman and ine
have eloped. Have ye amy marryin ieciii-
: ties around hereT'
The clerk replied in tho affirmative, aud
; the two Were ''spliccd" in less than an boaT.
The bridegroom WAS evidently not vet sat
, isiied, and fingered around the hotei book.
| "Clerk. said he, CO, ,tidcntially, ut
, length, 'hain't We better change the reg,s-
ter, and give us one room, now we're mar
, ried ?"
"Its already DONE" replied the clerk =,
| you're marked for the same rooni."
We'll, clerk, replied The keEtuckian,
5 quickly, ''wont yoG just show me up,
then, for I'm dpf,d slsepy"
: New Process FOR THE MANUFACTURE or
, STEEL.-An experiment. says tho Paris
l Presse, of n most interesting character, and
- having the highest interest for the iron in
t dustry, has taken place Mt the MarqHise
1 Stock-WorEE, IN presence of two eInilit iit
Q persons of tho Ecole Centrale. The object
Q Of this experiment was 60 make steel by one
d operation, a problem which has engaged ali
metallurgists, and which, if solved, lgonl.i
cause an industrial revolution. NJ. Aristide
!, Berard, an engineer whose name is familiar
p to all who have occupied themselves with
: this question, proposed TO change second
r class metal IN course of refining into steel
q of at least ordinary quality. 10y means ci =
r. process alternately oxydizing and rednctiye.
a His efforts have been crowned with sue.
= cess. The product obtained by his process,
q in the presence of two competent judges,
+ proved to be steal of good quality, suitable
|, for all purposes, and made with the facility
q necessary to its application to practical in
dustry. The operation was effected in q
reverbatory furnace, lasted about an boul
It and half and was accomplished
, with as much facility as pudding. In this
q process, instead of acting on 4S0 pound o.
l. metal to obtain iron of number one qnali
rs ity, from 6, GOO to ii, III pounds of metal Is
70 made by only one operation into Steel in
3 gots ready for the workshop, and with ar
N unexpected economy. We will lie muel
Is deceived if this invention has not in it th,
'f germ of q complete revolution in metal
a lurgy.
l. FALSE HAIR.-A Parisian journal gives N
3, some very important commercial news
An immense fall is declared To have taIer
| nlara in fbe vo1na of ornamental hair vor,