The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1869-09-30

Say, pomp, you niger, where you get
that new hat 2
!" by, at the shop, of course
w hat Is the price of such an article as
DAFT?
1 don't know, nigger-I don't know, de
sEopman wasn't dar.
Look at the ragged hem of your dress,
my dearl why don't you bind it over 2
said thrifty mamma to her careless daugh
ter. i intend to do 50, ma. Then do it
at once, OF We shall have words Oh no,
mamma, dear, replied the young lady,
peace.
What's that?' asked Mrs. Darlington,
looking up at the column of the place Ven
dome during her late visit to the Paris. -
The pillar of Napoleon she was answered
We'll. never did ! she exclaimed and
that's his plllow-he was great man to
use that But it's more like bolster
Clara, ] love but thee alone
THUS sighed the tender youth J
Oh hear me, then, my passion own,
With trembling lips, in earnest tone;
Indeed l speak the truth.
He paused-the blush o'erspread her cheek,
She let him draw her near:
Scarce for emotion could she speak,
Yet still she asked in accents meek,
How much he had year!
An Arab chief was taken to the opera
at hlarsellles, where superior music was
given In superior manner. he listened
and looked with great attention, and on
being asked what most excited his admira~
ton replied by pointing to the trombone
player and sayip, 10 see that christian
there swallow so much brass. | cannot yet
comprehend where he puts it.
Newton invited a friend TO dinner and
forgot it. The friend arrived and found
the philosopher in fit of abstraction Din
ner vas brought up for one. The friend,
without disturbing Newton, sat down and
dispatched it. Newton recovered from his
reverie, looked at the empty dishes and
said: We'll, really, if it was mt for the
proof before my eyes, | could have sworn
that | had not yet dined.'
In front of the theater at Oxford, there
are some gigantic stone figures the date
and subject of which are alike buried in
uncertainty Two sailors were walkiLg
past Who are these fellows shipmate ?
said one of them. The twelve apostles,
replied his friend. Twelve apostles! how
can Il at be? Why, there is only six of
EN- We'll, rejoined his informant, yer
wouldn't have 'em all on deck at once,
would YEP
I went into battle, said Yankee but
before | was long in the water saw huge
double jawed shark making rapidly towards
me. What was to be done?' When he
was within yard of me | faced round,
dived under the shark, and taking knife
from my pocket, ripped the monster up.
But did you battle with your clothes on p
asked an astonished listener. WELL an
swered the story teller, reproachfuly, well
[ &c think you need Mt be so tarnation par
tcular.
A young lawyer was examining bank
rupt as to how he had spent his money
There were about two thousand dollars un-
accountable for, when the attorney put on
severe scrutnizins face, and exclaimed,
with much self complacency. Now, sir, |
want you to tell this court and jury how
you used those two thousand dollars ? The
bankrupt put on a serio comic face, winke ed
at the audience, and exclaimed The
lawyers got that that! The Judge and au-
dience were convulsed with laughter, and
the counsellor was glad to let the bankrupt
go.