The Orangeburg news. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, 1869-04-10

her manner, her lock us she bade me "good
night" She ceftainly loved me, had been de-
ceived by my aiIdied scheme, expected me to
say l loved herand was cruelty disappointed,
terribly mocked humilated. H7 9grf7'
Her eyes. bright with tear. gltters, flashing
with unrestrained fury, haunted me there in
the dark night and her terrible words rung
in my ears through its Silly and silent
watches. - ~ ~
The formIsnd face Of that woman, in hcr:
outraged andsinsulted, but really towering and
majestic sensibility stood before me, and
frightened sleep from my restless pillow. The
exhibition Of such elevated and high.toned
emotions, which I had called forth only to
iriae with ana mock, quellcd my seli-conceit,
disconcertedsny scfcomplacency, Her soul
in all its truth and greatness, shone in her eyes,
spoke in her burning Indignation acted and
lived ii her expressive departure and in my
contemptuous dismissal In n word, hated
myself, loved her. She know it not, but had
lost the wager and had lost her. Then came the
thought, 'the unkindcst cut Of ALL" that she
loved me, believed me, and then found her
love Knocked, 'the pearl trampled upon"
found me guilty of such base, deep hypocrisy
Oh, how she must hate me, as now hated
myself. t
Then came the remor5c, deep and terrible,
the repentance, the humiliation of my sclfrc-
spcct, aud the high, noble resolution to atone
for my insult to her, to retrieve my lost and
sullicd purity of thought, the resolution to re-
gain her, her mocked but now priceless love-
With the good thought of atonc,ncnt and
prayer waited upon the brcezes of the night
for her forgiveness, came balmy sleep and
dreams of mind conscious again to itself of
right, dreams reconcilcd and beautiful yes
far more beautiful since now l knew her
dreams, which only the morning sun dissipatcd
and bade INC realize.
The next evening called at her house, and
after some delay, saw her enter the room.
81 anve perhaps compromised myself" she
fsaid In seeing %you this evening, 1t is only
that expect some atonemcnt for yesterday s
exhibition Of fine feeling that do consent to
see you"
That is the object of my call, Miss Lucy
My heart has dictated what was due to you
and to itself Miss Lucy. believe me, l have
just learned you. Knowing you as now do
feel how you must despise me. hate and
loathc myself. My nature cnn atone to itself
for its degraded sclfrcspcct only by acknowl.
edsing its own Hypocrisy.
This is the only way can ever forgive
myself. Oh that | knew how might oh.
tain your iorgivencss-how I might re.
gain that love which l believe you would have
bestowed upon me, had not mockcd, scorned
it. Oh. say one word Of forgiveness, one
word Of love to inc. Was it only by thi,
cursed ordeal by which / should forever lose
you, that it was destined that should know
you.
Miss lldcrton, Heaven itself forgives after
such repentance. My heart knows how it has
repentcd, and my conscience whispers Forgiven
Will you not forgive? | know you now? !
appreciate you, in your beauty and your worth
love you as love the ideal enshrined in my
heart of moral beauty and worth.
81 know | talk wildly, but fear, shudder
to think, pcrhnps-you will not forgive
paused as she remarked:
"Not at all wild are your words-they arc
very hne--you are treating me to dra
matte performance. really like it, is it origi-
nal? Did not already know what con
summate hypocrite and countcrfcitcr you are
| would be astonshcd at your histrionic per.
tormancc."
81 expected this, take any revenge you
please, only say you are satisfied, and that
have atoned, and | will be content. Miss
Lucy, prolong not this scene, for Gods sake
am unequal to it. Believe me, hear me, and
then strike me to earth with your blighting
scOrn. | love you as men love not women ba,
as angels love and adore the crowned monarch
of Heaven"
THAT is very fine" she exclaimed in ap-
plausc, chad VIC never taken that walk,
would really have thought you were in love
with me-"
Before God, worship YOU" almost
shrieked in my madness, and threw myself
upon my knees before her.s
She looked down Mt me, smiled pleasantly