The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1869-08-21
A DIET or RATS FOR THE LABOR
ING GLASSES.

ING GLASSES.
LAST evening, for the first time sensible
query was propounded in the frothy labor
convention which has been holding its ses-
sions here during the present week. A colored
delegate from Maryland was upon the floor,
engaged in the discussion of the coolie ques-
ton. According to his view of the case, the
coolie comes to this country, if he comes at
all, not to take the place of the negro laborer,
but to push the white man to the wall; and
in support of this theory, the sable gentleman
from Maryland turned upon his paler col
leagues with the pertinent question, "Can
a0,, eat rats p roar of laughter was the
only response which the brawny sons of toll
could make, but the response was characters
tic of the utter lack of wisdom and common
sense which has marked their proceedings
from the outset.
After five days were passed in wrangling
over that irrepressible gentleman, Miss Susan
b. Anthony. and in listening to the stupid
vagaries of old Frank Blair and Helper, the
renegade of Impending Crisis" fame, inter
spersed with the still more stupid platitudes
which the delegates themselves brought forth,
the so-called Congress, late in the session of
yesterday, reached the momentous question
of vote upon the platform. AS adopted, it
is constituted of seventeen planks, and each
plank is worthy of its origin. All the bosh
and nonsense which Blair and Helper and the
rest of them have gotten off during the week
is here boiled down and simmered out until it
presents as frail and airy fabric as a strip of
gossamer cloth. The national banking sys-
tenn is denounced because, of course, no
member of the convention has his
name upon list of stockholders
and because furthermore, it conflicts
with wonderful document known as the
Constitution of the United States. The pres
ent rate of interest is denounced, because as
a man with half an eye can see, at five per
cent. twice as much money can be borrowed
as when the rate of interest is at ten. The
entire monetary system of the country is de-
nounced, because, as the world goes, it is
capital that employs labor, and not labor that
employs capital, and the attempt of labor to
enslave capital is not always and invariably
successful. The payment of the national
debt in the hard coin to which the nation is
pledged the present rate of interest paid by
national securities from taxation are de-
nounced, because the bloated bondholders
take a different view of meUn1 and tUUD1 from
that held by the revolutionary members of
the Congress. Land monopolies are de-
nounced because, when laboring man enters
upon this sphere of speculation, he loses all
interest in labor unions and labor con-
crosses, and in the cheap buncombe in which
they delight to indulge Ten hours daily toll
are denounced, because eight hours will
give laboring man more time to study po-
htical economy and finance and agitate the
great labor question, even at the expense of
a decrease of twenty per cent. in the amount
of his daily earnings. The equal assessment
of taxation is denounced, because, if all the
revenue of the Government were derived
from the capitalists, the laborers could better
afford to devote good share of their time to
attendance upon labor congresses. And,
finally, although Miss Susan b. Anthony was
so roughly handled by the convention, the
women of the country are invited to rally
around the standard of the men and partici-
pate in the grand revel which will follow the
impending overthrow of the present order of
things.
Precisely what the convention is doing
to-day we are not advised as we write, but
there is one thing which it has promised to
do that receives our hearty endorsement, and
that is to adjourn. The city has had about
enough of it, and will take leave of the dele
gates without any profound expressions of
regret. They have accomplished nothing,
and despite the passage of resolution to get
up a new party which shall smash all the old
parties without much ado, and the defeat ofare-
solution declaring that nothing in the platform
shall be construed as a reputation of the
national debt, it is safe to say that they have
harmed no one except themselves and injured
nothing save the cause which they professsed
to represent. If the sun, moon, and stars
should chance to take the back track, at the
bidding of the Congress, and general moral,
social. economical, financial, industrial, and
cosmical upheaval should result, the laborine
classes throughout the country would be com
PEELED to respond in the affirmative to the
query of the dusky savan from Maryland:-
''Can you eat rats"
THE NEW YORK JUDICIARY