The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1869-10-07

at two guinness! For the SECOND
timel Any advance o. two gum
ness? For the third aud last time
going at two guin-nessl'
Rap!
Name, if you please sir?"
John runway" I said for the
lot was mine.-Lot 2l7. What ever
made me buy the lot? / am sure
didn't want it. | am afraid | am one
of those grown-up children who are
not safe TO be trusted out with money
In their pockets, unless copper. The
cons 10 my purse always leap up with
frantic desire to bug everything l see,
and the result Is, that no ma ter what
sum [ go out with, l always come
home penniless.
What on Garth could want now
with a second hand, patent firc-proof,
powder proof, bOmb-proof, thief
proof iron safe, constructed to resist
fifty- burglar power (nominaD, case
hardened, undrillable, unpickable, to
be sold bargain, owing to the key
being lost, and the only man who
knew how to make another having
gone to sleep with his fathers? When
l reflected about my purchase, be-
gao to feel quite hot. There is DO
dOub it was bargain, or might have
been, to somebody; but then, patent,
unpickable iron safes with the key
lost, and owner proof as we'll as thief
proof, are not everybody's money, how
ever cheap. [ had a cold. creeping
doubt if they we're mine. While the
auctioneer was describing it, and the
people all around the room were
yearning for it In bids, [ seemed TO
see many remarkable qualities ema-
natingifrom the safe, like perspiration,
so that its acquisition appeared to me
then peculiarly desirable. Other peo-
pie seemed peculiarly affected, for its
value increased mOmently. Some ten
or a dozen persons had all In turn de-
sired to be its fortunate possessor,
and all at Increased rates. The man
who bid forty shangs" certainly
must have seen his way to turn the
safe to account, or why have bid for
ty shaDgs" at all? And if so. of
course it was plain there must be a
way to turn it to account, and one
which few moments quiet reflection,
apart from the excitement of the
saleroom, would doubtless reveal. It
was something of this feeling made
me bid the two guineas," or, it may
be, the vague conviction that here
was an object suddenly become ex-
tremely desirable to q number of my
fellow creatures, which evoked cor
responding and envious desire In my
own breast. But now that the thing
was nine, all the latent value which
had before perspired from it under
the auctioneer's, hands seemed abb
sorbed again into It's shamefully
rusty iron sides-it had become a
miserable hundredBeight of useless
old iron-aad | Ioathed the very sight
of it, especially when | thought Of
Mrs. TrumWay.
My wife is not woman OF many
words; by no means the kind of wo-
man verbally to upbraid me for buying
incOnvertible bargains, and she has
had previous opportunities for so do
ing, If so disposed. Mrs Trumway
never says anything She didn't
when l once pought two hundred
weight of puffy, bloat6d cheese at
twopence per pound, and sold portions
Afterwards to some poor people |
kneW-as a kindness-at a trihing
profit, aud made them all very poorly,
aud got summoned before the magis-
trates, and fined for selling cheese
unfit for human food. and lost cheese,
temper, reputation, and e4 los. No;
at such times Mrs. prumway makes
no remarks; she only shifts. But the
amount of meaning conveyed by one
of Mrs. L. shifts is volumnious-nay
encyclopedia. 1t means, 20 dear,
yes; l knew how 'twould be. You've
been at 1t again, have you? Been
out with money in your pocket, and
come home with nothing but your
pocket left just like water in a
cOlander: the colander don't run
away-more's the pity. Motifs al
ways ready for more. And here am
], pinching aud screwing, and saving
money, and allowancing the house
down to one box of 'Tandstickors' a
week, and you going fooling money
away like this. Remonstrance, John
is perfectly useless. / have awaked
to the conclusion that l have married
an incorrigible idiot; but | don't com.
plain. No; noodle you may be, but
[ am your affectiOnate vile, Martha
RUNWAY. 1t meanes far more than
this; 1t means every recrlminatory
epithet which naturally sensitive
person, like me, can apply to himself
after making the pleasing discovery
that he has taken himself In.
I went home to dinner, which haG
been waiting an hour. [ said nothing
about my purchase. There was {
small snitf-a very small one-expres
siye Of, ITS not at all unlikely, John
though, mind, | don't accuse you O
it without evidence; but, now l come
to consider, it's rather more likely
than not that you've something OF
your mind, and nothing in YOU
purse" After dinner, | escaped W
stairs 0 my study. In the evening
saw 1t coming up my garden path Oh
pair Of trucks. Should | go down
No; reflected; | would not go down
How l detested the thing now! /
didn't look worth half a crown.
Yes, l heard the servant say il
answer to the man with the trucks
this rs Mr. Tcumway's."
SOS this" said the man; land
wish him joy of it, and [ shouldn'
mind glass Of beer to wish it hin
in"
Which conversation had the effec
of bringing out Mrs, L. Her compre
hensive mind must have taken in tn
situation at a glance.
Where is this from?" she aske,
the man.
From the saleroom, m"
"John!" It was the voice Of m
afFectionate wife addressed to her hus
band. Have you been buying any
thing at sale?"
so dear, yes" said I, calling dow
stairs-'Didn't L tell you? It's "a
safe"
Although two pair of stairs sep
arated me from the partner of 10