Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1869-04-23

BSi, e"huNeNcT ptolesslOu lie might
represent. stA a-aa.
--------z--- ~----------- e. .s.arF
How to- ESrcnls Down a.
,.. al Church. ..-......9
L. Discourage your pastor.
III. Discourage your fellow MEM
bers.
III. Destroy tho confidence OF
thc community. .h.'
TO DIscoURAuEyo YOUR PASTOR. a,a
1. Absent yourself from a. M.
services every Sabbath, or ut least
one in three. If hes not very
strong, one In four times may answer.
2. Neglect prayer and class meet
ings. sao 9.. ss...-.s.e .a.r..a..
8. Crlticise your minister freely,
praise him sparingly, find fault with
him plentlfully, pray for him little
or none. f.rre.a. r...# La. as..t..s.
4. Ii he proposes TO hold eSl g.
meetings, withhold your 90 aness,,
ton. a. -.-. ....te
5. Give yourself no eoaeerEa aHqnl
his salary, whether hoe pats heWefs
q. Never call on h.u, sgaattes fsf
allow him to think that hls celuiorE
or that OF his family, Il ~ matter Of
any Importance to your eyes, aagdw
TO DISCOURAGE YOUR MEMBens. ...
/. Observe tho directions given
above.1 H'#" .."E lIt 9E# rs@."##
2. Complain about everything
they do or don't do. .3 a#a.a'tn H"Ha5
3. Contrive to make yourself tho
head of a clique, and by their help
and your own industry, keep the
church In hot water generally. na@.
4. While doing this lose no oppor-
tunity OF complaining of the bad
treatment you are receiving. aaE"
5. Discard charity aud candor, aud
take distrust to your bosom and
make scheming your speciality. 0t
TO DESTROY THE coNFIpENcEo or rifH
.@. ta COMMUNITY. ...s#f
L. Observe the foregoing dircc-
tlons.
2. Tell the people that you are In
the church by force of circumstances
but have no respect for the way in
which business Is conducted. ,.t'
3. Publish the faults Of your
brethren, taking care TO magnify
them. H'stt - st".t.@
4. Nuke no effort to induce people
TO attend church. o. 1'''
o. Take no part I'm Sabbath School.
Publish 10 on all occasions that you
have no confidence In the concern,
predict that 1t must fall, go down,
aud never succeed. iI''
BY observing these directions, you
may, IL the church is not unusually
vigorous, have the pleasure of seeing
your predictions fulfilled. .H'
Foolish but Cool Couple.
As nm express train on the Mieh1-
gan Central Railroad was nearing
Aldion Tuesday afternoon, the passen-
gers waiting for the train were startl.
ed by the frequent whistling of the
engine. 1t was found that man was
driving alta furious pace TO get his hor-
SOS and wagon across the track before
the engine reached the crossing. The
engineer did his best TO stop the train
but IL was too late aud the hecowcatcher
struck between the horses aud the wa
gon separating them instantcr and
eonsignlng each place on opposite
sides of the track, little or none the
worse for the collision. The man aud
his wife leach about 65) were caught
upon the platform of the cow wcatcller
and Justin front of the engine. Instead
of losing presence Of mind and jump
ing off, they settled themselves COM
posedly, as though nothing had hap
pened, The old lady put her hand in
her muTIwhile tho old man with one
hand extended asifgrasping the reins
and the whip raised in the other as
sumed a jockey attitude, and thus
the old couple rode up to the station
triumphant amid the cheers OF the y,
ISLANDERS. Assoon as thetrain - ,t.
anumberd rushed to their tt.
but they declined all ail ar. i4
no concern for them tpts D8it "a
siderable for the fa5ag- fsu A ate
and wagon. The hog- s.Eg. 4 NJ.
jured aid the damage rs
was trifiing.
4 n. -----~--+---s s4s-.-s st#a