The union Democrat., 1869-08-28
Gbs Nniun 9emufrat.
That Horrible Chicago.


periencc Of a ia,cyer-hoic assy marry in The
garden city The rest.
tNew York Correspondence of III. Mobile Resster.)
think | remarked in my last letter that |
once met Chicago lawyer who warmly advo-
Gated marriage, and who explained to rue his
reason for so doing. For such a man to do
such a thing was to say the least, surprising.
/ listened with brea,hless interest while he
gave me brief history of his experience dur
ing the FIRST ten years of his residence in that
celebrated city. Said he:
~ first came to Chicago fifteen years ago.
Then was young and innocent. which it is
hardly necessary for me TO say that am not
at present. mad q friend living here whom
bad known while be resided in New York,
and conducted himself like civilized man in
civilized community. As be had written to
NE to visit himself and his wife when came
to Chicago, | remembered theinvitation when
! did visit that city, and Immediately on my
arrival proceeded to his house. He was not
at home just at the moment, and so asked
to see his wife, whom | had known only a
year before in New York. In answer to my
inquiry for Mrs. De Worse, a pretty, black
eyed girl came into my drawing-room, and
received me quite warmly.
well, We chatted very pleasantly together
until my friend came in, and really felt my
self beginning to experienced very affection
ate impulse toward her supposing, of course,
that sho was his niece, or cousin, or uncle, or
something of that sort. But in the course of
the evening / asked him whether his wife
was at home, and If so, when be proposed to
let me see her?
'ro my astonishment, he replied, This
lady is Mrs. De Worse thought you were
already aware of the fact
''Of course blushed and felt horribly un-
comfortable, and said that was not aware
that he had lost poor Emily.
"Oh, said he, Emily is very well, and has
married a partner of mine. We were di-
vorced, you know, about six months ago, and
/ married my present wife only last week.
We'll | didn't feel quite so affectionate
toward her after that, for had been warmly
attached to Emily but we said no more about
the matter, and | went away, vowing never
to get myself into such n scrape again by
asking after anybody's wife. l did not see
my friends new wife for about month after
ward, until one day met her in the house
of mutual acquaintance, and in the course
of conversation said to her: by the way,
might | ask you to say to your husband that
l want him to come to my office some day
next week ?"
"'I don't think you know my husband,
she replied, smilingly.
"'What do you mean?' said /, getting
rather nervous,
"'Why, my new husband is named Smith,
she answered, Il was separated from Mr.. De
Worse yesterday morning, and married Mr..
Smith last night
81 left that house pretty rapidly, and re-
gistered second vow, to the effect that |
would never, to my dying day, ask a Chicago
lady about her husband again. The two
mistakes had already made, as to Chicago
wives and husbands made me decidedly shy
OF them. But the very next day went into
De Vorse's store (corn, pork, and provisons) ,
and found him engaged in conversation with
tcrribiy-angular female, who looked like a
compound of a New England old maid, a
Western woman's rights lecturer, and an
Arkansas squatter's wife. Of Ofcourse, Ipitied
my friend, and when the terrible female had
gone, remarked: Il congratulate you on your
escape that horrible female would have ex-
hausted any mans patience in ten minutes
conversation What was my horror when
he replied 4 must beg you to speak more
respectfully of that lady she is at present
my wife--a fact of which you are, of course,
unaware, as we were married very privately
last night
II never said a word, but fled abruptly
from his presence. Once more swore-and
| went before Notary, who had the biggest
kind of a Bible, so rs to make the oath more
blndlng-that never, never would | speak
disparagingly of any Chicago man. After |
felt better, and for two weeks avoided making
al nNin nf0Go kha sc Al
however, | met the new and angular Mrs.
De Worse, to whom had, in the meantime,
been introduced, having the liveIiest kind of
quarre! with big prize-fghting looking
fellow, who was apparently on the point of
knocking her down. OF course few to her
rescue and demanded to know of the fellow
what he meant; also, if he was aware who
that lady was, and who her husband was
To which he briefly, sententiously, but, as it
struck me, irrelevantly remarked, 'Hellr
IL paid TO further attention to him. but
turning to Mrs. De Worse, said Madam =
permit me to protect you from that rufian's
insoleace.'
"lnstead of thanking me, she actually slap
ped my face, and said /: IN teach you to in
tertere between man and wife, That's ny
husband, and we've been married three days
It's a pretty hard thing if a wife can't stop in
the street to speak to her husband without
having some idiot come and make fuss
about it,
Now, :" continued the lawyer, 'this is not
only true story, but il is fair example os
the continued trouble that man gets into
who lives in Chicago, and dosen't know how
to hold his tongue. You now understand
why hate the Chicago customs, and why
90 in for indissoluble marriages, | never
made mistake in asking man about his
wife the whole time l lived in New York,
but here have got into more wkward places.
and had more fights than I can count, just
because no man or woman stays married more
than q month at fnrthest."
We drank weak lemonade together in
solemn thoughtfulness, and parted from
him with the feeling, that bad as it is to be
indissolubly connected with an unpleasant
mother-in-law, it is better than to be con-
stantly bothered by change of wife.
A young minister was diseoursing on the