The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1869-07-03
The Secret Let Out.

The Secret Let Ont.
The Lodge of /. O. O. o. F., at Mr-.
up clean and nice, and it was resolved
unanimously that Mrs. k should be
hired to do the job.
After the Lodge adjourned, the guardian,
who knew the inquisitive character of Mrs.
--, procured billy-goat and placed
him i'll a closet. lie then informed the
lady of the wishes of the Lodge, and said
he wished her to come early next morning.
as he then would be at leisure to show her
what was and what was not to be DONE
Morning came, and brought with it Mrs.
k, with her broom, brushes, pals,
tubs, &c, prepared and armed for the job,
and the guardian waiting for her arrival.
"Now, madam said he, 'sI'll tell you
what we want done, and how we came to
employ you. The brothers said it was diff
ticult to get any one to do the job who
wouldn't NEEDLE with the secrets in that
little closet pointing to the goats prison.
We have lost the key, and can't find it to
lock the door. assured them that you
could be depended on
depended on-' said she, 81 guess I
can. My poor dead and gone husband who
belonged to the Free and Anti Masons used
to tell me all the secrets of the concern,
and showed me the marks the gridiron
made when he was ventilated, and told me
how they fixed poor Morgan, and have
never told living soul to this day. If no.
body troubles your closet to find out secrets
till l do, they will lay there till they rot
so they will
81 thought so, answered the guardian :;
"and now | want you to commence in that
corner and give the room decent cleaning.
and have pledged my word and honor for
the fidelity of your promise so don't 90
into that closet, and all will be well,'' and
he left the lady to herself
No sooner had she heard the sound of his
foot on the last step of the stairs than she
exclaimed, "Don't go into that closet I'll
warrant there pesky grdiron or two, or
Anti-Mason for all the world, I'll be bound.
I'll see, any way l can take little peep.
and nobody will be any wiser. l guess l
can keep a secret
Sultlng the action to the word, thinking
all the willie what a glorious secret she
would have to tell Mollie Trump, her next
door neighbour she stepped lightly and
cautiously to the door. peeped mysteriously
about, to see if any one could see her, and
then quickly opened the door. What was
her horror to see coming from far corner
of the room, after having uttered most
unearthly shrek, a living, actual bona file
billy-goat, with perfect torrent of wrath
flashing out of his eyes. Making tremen-
dous rush for his liberty, he reached the
threshold of his prison almost by the time
the old lady had sufficiently recovered to
scrcech "murder' and ''tire" without
getting choked, and came near upsetting
the dame at the door. Both made rush
for the head of the stairs but the door was
full of implements for house cleaning, and
all were swept clear from their position
down to the bottom of the steps.
The noise and confusion occasioned by
such unccrimonious coming down stairs,
drew half the town to witness Mrs. KS eff
forts to get from the pile of pals, tubs
brooms and brushes into the street. Who
should be the first to the spot but the ras-
cally guardian, who, after releasing the
goat, which was crippled for life, and up
lifting the rubbish that bound the good
woman to the earth, anxiously inquired if
she had been taking the degrees.
"Takin' the degree :" exclaimed the now
irate lady, "you fetch-taked hateful, you
If you call tumbling from top to bottom of
the stairs, and bein scared to death, takin'
things by degrees, why l have them. And
if you brighten and hurt other folks as you
have me, I'll warrant they'll make as much
noise as did, and mebby more
I hope you did not open the closet, ma
dam? said the guardian.
"Open the closet! Didn't Eve eat the
apple when she was told not to? If you
want woman to do anything, tell her not
to, and she'll do it for certain. l couldn'
see anything through the key-hole, and l
wanted to know what was in that closet so
I opened the door, and the tarnal critter
popped right out at me. / thought l was
Il goner and started for the stairs with
Satan butting me at every jump. l fell
over the tub, and got down stairs all in a
heap-ugh THAT screechin', hateful thing !"
"But, madam" said the guardian, "as
you are in possession of the great secret of
the Order, you must now go back and be
initiated in the regular way.
Regular way" exclaimed she "and
do again, and ride that critter without bli-
die or saddle No sir, never I don't
want nothing to do with the man who rides
| it, nuther. I'd look nice on billy-eoat.
wouldn't l now? No, sir! I'll never go
nigh it again, no / won't nor into your
hall, nuther; and if l can help it, no lady
shall never join the Oddfellows. Why
should rather join the Free Masons, and be
fried on gridrOn us long as fire could be
kept under it, and be pulled from the gar
ret to the cellar with a halter round my
neck, just as my poor dead and gone hus-
band was; for he lived over it, but I never
could outlive such another ride as took
to-day. You don't ketch me back in there"
THE MANUFACTURE OF IvoRY.-Ivory is
used for the manufacture of combs piano
keys, &c. The elephants tusks are pur-
chased at from $50 to So per pound The
tusks received vary from six to nine feet in
length, the former being about the average
They have been found weighing ninety
pounds, though the average is but seventy
pounds. The tusks are hollow in the cen
tire up TO the point where they grow out of
the heads, while 4 small nerve runs clear
to the tip of the tusk. The tusk is
sawed into semi-circular blocks, and again
sawed either into the length of the comb
or of piano-key, as may be required. A