The Republican journal., 1869-01-07

How THEY DO II AT FAIRS A kentuckian
lows. 1t is pretty much the experience of
every one at those conventicles everywhere:
/ dropped into fair held for the benefit of
some COMPOUNDED society other. | thought
would cXpend Il dollar or two, and see what
was going on. SO bought myself a ticket
and Slid in. l went to a table where refresh
mcnts were sold, and called for some oysters,
chicken salad, and coffee. beautiful siren
with big black eyes, lutte white hands, and a
most bewtching mouth, spread the edibles be-
fore me. ! don't know how it was, but felt a
strong affinity toward that ministering angel
at once. While eating and drinking, and de-
vouring her with mine eyes in the me antime,
we struck up scattering conversation. at
last / arose and handed her llve-dollar bill.
She put it in u little box, and forgot to give
me any change, but instead thereof sweet
smile unto me saying: care you q stranger
to Chcago?" eyes, Madam, am from Ken
lucky" els it POSSIBLE? l am Kentuckian
also s'Ah l knew it," The reply was
whispered, but it produced a faint blush, a
dropping of the beautiful eyelashes, and a
gratifed smile ''Would you like to walk
around the room and look over our fancy ar
ticles?" quoth the siren. ''If you will show
me-" quoth the spooney. She took my arm,
and raising herself by it to her toes, she muir
Go away, Grant, with your presidency, 7
would not change places with you this minute.
Nor with Colfax, who was married this morn
| ing. Go away jackScreWS you can't raise me
any higher. We wandered through that room,
talkng-sweetly talking, of things that had
been, of things that were, and of things that
might be. Pretty soon we came to a silver
tea-set that was to be ratified off. Would
take q chance? OF course would. Then a
wonderful cake, with a valuable ring concealed
in it, appealed TO the cupidity of the chance
takers | was persuaded to take chance in
the cake. And SO things glided on until con-
cluded that if l took many more chances my
chances for getting home would be rather slim
So | refused to tempt fortune any further
Anon costly workboN met our eyes, but
bravely resisted all appeals, until the little
black-eyed scoundrel took me on a new tack
| Leaning heavily on my arm, and absolutely
resting her check on my shoulder, with those
wicked eyes and that silvery tongue she said :
''Wont you take a chance for me?' Oh well,
folks preach about the fall of Adam, but |
never blamed him, thong III don't think the old
fellow mad half the excuse ] had l needn't
tell you that took that chance, and kept on
taking chances for the unprincipled and beauti-
full wretch that had me in tow until had not
a dollar left. Yes, was penniless, and then
it began to dawn me that the young lady
was working for the success of the Fair, and
that l had made a tirst-class fool of myself, as
usual. There | was a bankrupt in money and
in reputation, in self-respect had been rob-
bed--yes, robbed. For where is the difference
between a pair of Derrngers and pair of
black eyes in a robbery? You part with your
money because you can't help it. | know that
society looks with lenient eyes upon these fe-
male guerrillas who haunt these charitable
fairs, but it is my opinion, when all the rob-
bers come to take their final trial and receive
their final sentence, that little Chicago robber
will take her place by the side of Jack Shep-
pard.