Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1869-09-08
A Hard ShelI.Sermon.

From the ii F0sO (lll) journal,
Most people have read the sermon
on the text, "They shall gnaw at a
file, and flee into the mountains of
Hepsidam where the lion roareth, and
the whang, doodle mourneth for its
first-bOrn," and have laughed at it as
n witty invention. but we have some
thing that actually happened that VIII
banisn the whangdoOdle into the vale
of tears, and cause the lion TO "dry
up" incontinently:
Wm. Reynolds, of Peoria, is well
known as an enthusiastic worker in
the Sabbath School cause. He is per-
haps better known than any other
man in the State, and we give the fol-
lowing story as he tells it, near as We
remember. The main facts are all
absolutely true. He was in the south
ern part of the State last week, organ
izing Sunday schools, when he en-
countered hard-shell Baptist neigh
borhoOd. The minister settled over
the little flock looked with jealousy
upon the movements of the new lights
and finally announced his intention
of preaching a sermon against them.
On the Sabbath designated, the Sun
when the preacher announced that
well-knOwn text:
"Thou art Peterl and on this rock
1 will build my church, and the gates
of hell shall not prevail against it."
After giving Peter a good setting
out, the minister closed as follows, in
that peculiar singing tone that is in
describable, except to those who have
heard it:
"Yes, my brethering, ah-an' the
gates of hell shell not prevail again it,
ah! Now, you'd like to know about
these 'ere gates o. hell, ah! Well, my
brethering, thar air four gates o. hell,
ah
''Thar is, fustly, the Sunday School
systum, ahi That thar is one gate to
hell, ah, whar they bring young men
and wimmen togethir ah, and Onder
the igee of teachin' on 'em the Bible,
they set 'em hankerin' arfter one an
other ah, an so open wide that gate
o. hell ahI
"An' the next gate o. hell is wuss'n
the fust all. That thar is Bible So-si-
titles ah, whar they put the word into
the hands o. them as haint larnin
sufficient ah, for to understan' it ah;
an this here, brethering, is one of the
wust gates o. hell ah, of which we
read about in the Bible ah.
"An the next gate o. hell, my
brethering, is Temperance societies ah,
whar they 90 rite into yer house and
bust into yer rooms ah, and try TO
diskiver eff ye hev anythin' ah that is
good for the stummick's sake all, an
Iar
onto the grOun, ah, and let it all run
to waste ah."
Signs of dissatisfaction among his
church members. Greatly excited, he
continued:
"Yis, breathering, they do, ah.-I
They air boun' to bust up all o. your
bizness, an'-an', ah, tharby they open
gate o. hell, ah. These air
the men that air ah, goin' to come
us, and prevail, ah, agin the
rock on which will foun' my church
ah. Yis, brethering, ah, they air sot
out to do it, ah, an we must jine hands
ah, an war agin em', ah, that they
shell not prevail, ah.
"An' the next gate o. hell all. my
ah, is the Republican par
ty ah. Signs of approval from his
Yes, brethering ah,, the
party ah, wOt hez sit all
the niggers free ah, and turned 'em
agin thar masters ah, an agin them
as put thar money in 'em alb, an hez
cheeted and robbed the South ah, |
outen it's material rites ah, an the |
gates o. hell shall not prevail agin it /.
ah.n
We can give the preachers name |
and address, if necessary. The party |
were too much annoyed to take accu- |
rate notes. But Mr.. Reynolds him
self will vOuch for the truth of what |
we have written. Truth is stronger |
than fiction.