The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1869-09-11


always his unfortunate function to stand
between the boy and his dearest pleasures.
Whenever there is fire, or a fight, or an
upset, or turnover, or any other opportunity
for the contemplation of suffering or loss
to the sons of men, just as the boy is at the
very height of his enjoyment the policeman
is sure to appear, drive him back, and inter
pose a form aggravatingly bulky and
Opaque between him and the sight which
was afliording him unmiXed qualification
This conduct is especially irritating at a
fire. for it may be observed that boys always
take peculiar interest in 4 fire. They
have somehow got into way Of regarding
it as something specially got up for their
entertainment, and indeed of all ordinary
disasters there is none so well calculated to
afford them thorough satisfaction. There
is, at the very least, the destruction of
property to be witnessed, which is always
delightful. If it should luckily happen to
be in dwelling house, there is the addi-
tional pleasure derived from the terror and
confusion of the inmates, and the chance
of the sublime treat of seeing them carried
out more or less scorched and wrapped up
in blankets, not to speak of the possibility
some one being entirely roasted From
this Paradise of delights, at the policeman $
bidding, the boy has to "stand back"
and sometimes so far that he can only
hear the distant sobs of the laboring
engine; and at the supreme moment, when
the roof falls in, he is left to his own imag-
ination to estimate the amount of damage
done and the probabilities of life lost.
Consequently, there are few spectacles
SO soothing to the boy-mind as that of a
policeman in difficulty, and for this reason
boys may be always observed to muster
strong in the neighborhood of police sta
tions for the sake of seeing the force in
volved i'll taking charge of troublesome
cases of intoxication. An elderly lady on
her way to the station, while suffering un-
der that form of inebricty which makes the
patient lie down and kick, every dozen
yards, and between halts bite and scratch
the officer, is a sight peculiarly refreshing
to the boy, presenting as it does, two beings
with whom he is at feud under humiliating
and uncomfortable circumstances. For if
the boy hates the policeman he hates lovely
woman too and it must be confessed that
in this case also he has some reason for the
antipathy, because unquestionably lovely
woman hates him. The affection of mother
and son apart, is purely a matter
of instinct, a mere animal attachment
no woman ever yet was fond of boys
There is q natural antagonism between
them. Women are conservative by tenn
permanent; boys are naturally revolutionary.
Women are lovers of order; disorder in all
its forms is what boys love. All the feel
ings that are strongest in womcn-rever-
ence, pity, tenderness, sympathy with suf-
ferng-are in boys " conspicuous by their
absence Naturally, therefore, there is
no love lost on either side. Lovely woman
in distress excites i'll the boys mind emo
tons the very opposite of those with which
the late Mr.. Il. p. Cook used to boast him
self inspired and she on her part is at no
pains to conceal the fact that she considers
him an imp, an aggravating toad and 4
young monkey. She loses no opportunity
of imprcssing upon him that he is an inle
rior being. and possibly the natural misan-
thropy of boys is occasionally intensified
by the depressing theories as to their own
physical constitution imbibed while still
under female domination. From woman s
lips they learn that
"Snips and snails and puppy-dogs' tails,-
That's what little boys are made of :;
while, with perhaps pardonable Partially
to her own sex, she declares that
Sugar and spice and all that's NICE
That's what little girls are made of.
"Quihus
Meliorc luto finxit pr;pcordia Titan
1t may be that some of the unsatisfactory
qualities of boys are in part due to the des-
pair and the envy which such gloomy ac-
count of their comparative anatomy would
naturally produce. If we cannot accept
the view literally, it must be admitted
there is something in it figuratively. In
all other animals the difference between
the sexes at an early age is triiling in a
man it is very striking. To take a familiar
illustration from the strcets,-since that
excellent piece Of legislation sometimes
called ''the Bass Relief Act - has been in
operation, 4 vast number of barrel-organs
have been altered, and instead of grinding
they now supply reels, jigs, and hornpipes
to neighborhoods where such things are
thoroughly enjoyed. 1t isrseareely possible
to look into Il back street in London now
without seeing an organ-grinder at work,
and several couples of little girls dancing,
often gracefully, always prettily and hap
PLY. But no reader of this or any other
journal ever saw any boys joining in that
innocent amusement; though it must be
allowed they do sometimes cut in and per-
form cvolutions in the nature of war
dance round the organist, to whom they
address certain traditional scraps of glib
bcllSI supposed 10 DC injurious expressions
of an intensely irritating character, out of
some foreign language, no matter what,
but Ineligible and CALLING to him as an
alien.
And here it may be observed that the boy
has this immense advantage, that lie is
above all creatures entirely 0raiGns,-no
one English word hits off the quality pre-
cscly.-that, as he respects nothing, so he
is totally free from the weakness of self
respect. and knows not what it is to feel
himself contemplate or ridiculous. Hence,
in giving annoyance. he is, never checkod
by any sense of degradation. He would
coat himself from head to foot with mud
an inch thick if he thought there was Il
chance of running against a well-drcSsed
fellow-creaturc and escaping unthrashcd.-
This, joined with an almost diabolical in
gcnuity in devising modes of aggravation,
makes him nearly as an accomplished a
tormentcr as his congener the Red Indian.