Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1869-02-05
MARK TWAIN.
Some Account of His Late Travels
He has a Splendid Time.


scenery, while waiting on tho banks of
the lake for the return of the boats, be
says But the next twenty minutes
hung heavily on my hands. There was
nothing in the world to look at but five
hundred umbrellas. and occasionally a
floating glimpse of the water--and even
umbrellas lose their interest in the long
run, l find. There IS nothins exciting
about umbrellas nothing iir'iliing.--
Ones pulse beats just as calmly in the
presence of umbrellas as if they were not
there. And they don't really amount to
anything for scenery, being monotonous
when there are so many"
Mr.. Twain thinks John Alien I" lost
RAM" and adds 4" Let us be consistent
if we are nothing else, and surely there
is little of the sheep in John Allen,
lost or otherwise Tommy MADDEN ev-
identity has mark Twain's sympathy -
Another person, hungry for fame, and
jealous of John Aliens brilliant fortune,
advertised in ill-tempered language that
in the matter of awful and deliberate
wickedness, the boosted John Allen was
an innocent lamb to him, and proceeded
to prove it by series of evidences, Ell
Their one of which ought to be sufficient
to damn him without even a glance at
the others. This man was naturally in
censed at the injustice that had been done
him, and outraged by the spectacle Of
another man, wearing laurels to which
he himself was alone entitled, as the
guerdon of long lifetime earnestly and
unselfishly devoted to the commission Of
peculiarly revolving crimes. To such
mind, the reflection that after all his life
had been failure, conld not be other than
agonizing. He invited attention to his
case-insisted on throwing his doors
open to prayer Haunted his superior
sins before the public, and went on rail
ing at the feeble imposter, John Allen"
About this time the Wickedest Man
himself arrived-a tall, plain, bony fel-
low, with good natured look in his eye,
Water street air about him, and
touch of Irish in his face. He stood in
the door, and crowd of vagabonds on
the sidewalk CAPPED and stared at him in
stupid admiration. He said
Don't this sort of thing ever stir up
the devil in you-or may be you don't
mind it, being used to being notorious 2"
l thanked him for the compliment,
and said | wasn't notorious enough to
have become an object for people to stare
at
"No; but if that's so, you're lucky.
They stare at me till want to knock
their heads off. Why, they come here
and march right in and ask newell,
you stand off there and I'll show you
how they do. There, now, that's about
right"
Then the speaker stepped into the street
aud returned with his hat in his hand,
and walked up gingerIy and said
"Are you the wickedest mau in New
York 2"
Yes"
John Allen %
"Yes."
You 2"
Yes"
Good God =
And then they walk around me, this
way, and then side around tother way,
and examine the back of my head, and
stoop down and feel my legs. And then
they 90 off mumbling to themselves, as
if they can't possibly understand it, any
how. Now you know that bothered me
like sin, at first, but it don't now. I've
learned trick. When they ask me
questions, ask them another. am like
the Irishman. The priest met him one
day, and says:
How's this, Paddy. that you've not
been to church of late 2"
"Be me sowl, SEEM it's yer reverence,
| can't answer ye-but if 'twere the
Protestant blaggard over beyant | cod
dot"
"Very well, then, Paddy,% said the
priest, walking away bit; now, I'm
coming toward We a representative of the
Protestant minister, and so ye can answer
me, Paddy, how is it ye've not been to
church of late ?"
"Molnd your own business, and get
out of this, We id ould Protestant
limb of the devil"
Of the Sherman House at Chicago he
says "They gave me room there,
away up, l do not know exactly how
high, but water boils up there at 100
degrees. l went in dumb waiter which
was attached to a balloon. 1t was not
a suitable place for a bed-chamber, but
it was prominent altitude for an obser-
vatory. The furniture consisted of ia
bic, a camp stool, a washbowl, German
Dictionary and patent medicine altman
&C for 1912. 1 do not know whether
there was bed or mott didn't notice.
However, was glad got that room,
for l stayed there an hour anA.took notes
of an instructive conversation which was
going on in an adjoining apartment. l
overheard the following legend {:
No, she wouldn't marry me. You were
misinforned. 1t was broken off, and in
the saddest way. was not in the least
to blame, upon my word and honor,
though neither the girl nor her father,
the deacon, ever believed me, or ever for
gave me. 1t was during the big election
canvass, when Lincoln ran the first time.
| T,,o tb;rds of tho boposf daooon.c Oo,l