The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1869-07-17
winning easily by length. Flora Temple OF
some other fast female coming in second
4'15.-Bagg0ge arrives.

Disappearance of the other handle and lock of
my trunk. Suggest to this Baggage-master, that
trunks, as well as tubs, were intended to stand
on their own bottoms b. NJ. throws at me
box marked "Glass, with care" aud tells me to
go to hyphen and mind my Blank business.
4'35 p Mask conductor of the Mount Holly
train when the train will start. He looks at
his watch and says "Pretty soon, now"
4'50 p Mn reply to numerous inquiries,
the conductor responds that Gwen get off very
shortly, now" / remark that "If we don't start
right aloay we shall lose the right o'toay." Con-
ductor says, "Oh no, plenty of time before the
market trains due My joke lost. n. B. This
conductor don't read the "Supper Table Series"
515 P. M.-Practcal joke on part of engi-
neer, who starts train ahead about fifty yards.
Intense excitement among the passengers.
Engineer suddenly backs train again, upset
ting an old lady and causing much confusion
$50 2. M.-Conductor says we shall start
very soon, now. My trunk gets into my head
and causes me much uneasiness. Have a vague
suspicion that my check belongs to the other
persons trunk. Think I'll go and see. Find
kerosene can (nattened), a kit of macllerel with
head out), two large caslets of spoiled tomatoes,
and an iron bedstead piled on my trunk. Ask
Baggage-master if my check is right. He says
he don't know, and what's more, he don't care.
$50 P. M.-Conductor calls out 'All aboard!"
and informs me confidently that we shall start
very shortly now. As many passengers as the
train will hold secure SEATS the rest stand in the
smoking-car. Short skirmish between Baggage
Master and late arrival with portmanteau. L.
A. wants to put portmanteau in baggage-car. B.
NJ. says he'll be something profaned if he's
agoin' to take any more baggage on this train
so there now, tant no use O. talllin'!
roc
three false starts we are at last fairly Off at the
rate of at least six miles an hour. Small boy
goes through the cars with waterng-pot, aud
sprinkles passengers, to lay the dust. Bigger
boy follows with EVENING TELEGRAPH and
other papers. Everybody buys THE TELEGRAPH,
and good humor prevails for the next half
hour.
7'3O P. M.-Train stops beyond Merchantville
to allow the conductor and braIesman to pick
blackberries. Passengers descend and hold
desultory picnics by the roadside.
$40 p. M.-EIt route again. Stout elderly
party observes to conductor that it's an internal
shame sir-we were due at Mount Holly two
hours ago, sir. Conductor says, 'That's nothing;
make it up between here and there ~
| $50 P. Meeting dark Our iron steed is
rushing through the night with appalling speed
Unprotected female asks brakesman if there
''ain't no danger in scootin' so fast?' Brakesmau
responds that, 'Lor bless her, no; they heO made
fifteen mile an hour afore now."
| 1OP. M.-Awakened by the conductor, who
informs me that the train don't go no further
and that I must hurry up and take the stage fol
Browns Mills. Ask him if it isn't very late
He replies that we are a little behind time thi
afternoon CD but the weather S pleasanter thar
in midday.
As I set foot on terra .tirDa, dark o1jec
flies through the air and lands in gutter of the
waste water from the hotel kitchen. 1t is