The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1869-08-26
CHIPS.

'~' ~ - N"N-T F~'N f'''"
Henry Ward B'ecbsr says twill uayeg
do to preach cream aud practice kim
milk.
HEaE,-Tbo advance gaurd Of uH
army of 100, 100000 flies,
Jsrrod says that youug boys whc
marry old maids gather in The spring
Of life, the golden fruits Of Outuma,'
There is young lady 10 this city 90
very particular about her company Ihet
she wont wear low shoep.
1t "a not spleudors, aud poven, tha!
marx the grades Of being, and determine
the footprints Of progress. 1t 10 lhs
mind tho soul Of man,
Christianity has given to truth dig
nty independent of time and numbers
1t has required that truth should be bes
lieycd and respected IOriIselr,
An uagrOmmaticat doctor suggests
that 'Patioula is virtue
A negro was hung in St, Louis, the
other day, aud his last words on tho
scaholl were: See what woman will
bring a man tor Yes, bad womOE,
An Irshman being asked why ho ro'
fused to pay doctors BILL said Sure.
he dido't give me any thing but some
cmclics, aud divil a one would lay in ny
gummiok ''
The Baptist Of Boston and New En-.
gland have just rOi'cd ten thousand dol,
| logs for the American Baptist Publica
ton Sotialy to establish depository q
the Society in Boston.
A Texas paper says that though court
ing can still go on, getting pauisd is
played out, there being no one, in olIioo
there who is uUIhoirzed to perform the
ceremony.
| A Joker ipsl arrived 10 California
/ writes back, The distance from Cleveland
to San Francisco by tho Pacific Railroad
is equal to 2lI games of euchfo l7J
drinks, and III cigers
The Goldfish that wears Wedding gold
ring IN his oulrOlG has been caught
( again OF Nova Scotia The inscription
on this particular amulet was in black
letters, and read, May God. rboyS con.
lipue cur love-
Tho boxing 6fihe ST l.aais Afteslaa-
well hos been stopped nt4 depth ofS,si3~
feot, aud the hole plugged upat depth
of 200 feet, whore there is pure, sweet
water.
The Commissioner OF Internal Rgs-
enuc So Us tho government will lose moth.
ing by tho destruction of whisky in the
bonded warehouse NJ Philadolphia by
fire, as the revenue tax had been paid.
A smart young lady in reply to an IN
quiy why she did not get married, said
il was because she was unable to sup
port husband.
What word Of fye letters will coutoin
but one aiIcr Two have been taken from
ii? 81 oae,
Nader, may go and sch"lm!
Yaw, M dading doucr
Hang your clothes on hickory limb.
But don't 50 near the wasser.
lsa marriage lcCa,e bill Of attained
--her?
lfyou go into store and fud the
proprietor lying on the counter asleep
you may BET your bools lie dent adSet'
lise,
The best rule is 10 be polite to every
one and unless ruleness amounts 10
positive aud intentional insult, TO tnke
no heed Of it is the only way TO DO
happy in world where every second
man is too oblu5e, and every Third one
too III ppered 10 be pleasantly aad
frankly cou'sous.
10 teaching young horse TO drive
well do not hurry 10 see how last he can
trot. Keep each pace cle'r aud distinct
from tho other, that is in walking make
him walk and do not lot him trOt. IL
irolling, be as careful that he keeps
steady At his pace and do not allow himw
TO slacken into walk.
Lis s,il tha, the first crocodile seen
in this conntry was recently, captured ~
Florida. He had probably Just run
over from Airica to visit his relatives
the alligator,
England has refused to receive Maj,
Jas. Haggoriy, as U S. Consul 10 GIas-
gov, on account of hi0 active connection
With the Fenian movement. Some ono
more acceptable 10 Johu Bull will have
10 bo appointed.
Postmaster General Creswslls honss
near Elkion, Md, was entered by burg
| L.. 90, T,o.I,v ayuoin1 ahnul n. nlnch