The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1850-1873, 1869-10-15
Sayings by Josh Billings.

1
Benevolence IL the cream that rises on
the milk ov human kindness. - a
Courage without discretion liz q ram
with horns on both ends-he will hav
more fites on hand than he kan we'll at
tend to. fs.l fFFt
Hunting after happiness IL like hunting
after lost sheep in the wilderness; when
yu find it the chances are that it iz a
skeleton.
A dog iz the only animal kritter who
luvs yu more than himself. tftF ai
There liz no more real satisfackshon in
laying up in yure buzzum an injury
than thare liz in stuffing dead hornet,
who haz stung you, and keeping him tew
look at.
Old friends are like old cheese, the
strongest.
All money that IL well spent il good
investment.
If we would all oy us take kare ov our
own souls, and let our neighbOrs alone,
thare would be less time lost, and more
souls saved.
Before l would preach the gospel az
some ministers are obliged to, for 450 dol
lars q year, would get living as Neb-
udkenezzer did, and let the congregashun
60 tew grass to.
Contentment is the vittles and drink ov
the soul l1 ..5.., ....1.,-.-.
Did WI ever hear son Dragging about
hiz father, whose father could with justiss
brag about hiz son?
The safest kind ov faith l kno ov is hu-
manity. a.
The man who never makes emmy mis-
takes, like the angle-worm, never gifts far
away from hiz hole.
A brilliant blunder in writer il often
one ov hiz best hits. .
Tyranny IL often changed, but never
destroyed.
Sucking whipt sillybub thru a rhy
straw IL good deal like trieing tcw live
on buty.
Inevcr knu profound phool yet who
did not affekt gravity, nor truly wlze
man whose face was not alwus cooked and
priued for laugh.
Prudery liz nothing more than cOquetry
gone to seed.
New York city IL fasst place-yu kant
even pass a phuneral procession, unless yu
hav got the fastest hoss.
Truth haz hardly clothing enuff tcw
hide its nakedness.
A pompous man il like full-blown blad-
der; it liz pure malice tew prick him.
The money and morality NV this world
are good deal alike, the principle never
loses sight ov the interest.
Pity costs nothing land aint worth moth
ing.
What men kant do they are apt to ad.
mire-they don't criticise a mountain, be-
kause they kant make one.
Poverty liz one ov them kind Ov misfOr-
tunes that we all of us dread, but none Oy
us pity.
Thare IL lots ov people in this world
who covet misfortunes, jist for the luxury
ov grunting. lg-s
1t iz camparat,7c'v eazy to repent oV
the sins that we &c committed, but tew
repent ov those which we intend tew com
NIT is asking tew mutch of emmy man
nowadays.
1 thank God for one thing, and that IL
when cverybuddy else IL happy, l am sure
to be.
Most men 90 thru life az rivers go tew
the sea, by following the lay ov the
around
In youth we run into difikultys, in old
age diflikultys runs into us.
"Times amt az they used to be this
haz bin the sollum and wise remark oy
mankind ever since Adam was boy.
Secrets are poor property at best; if VI
circulate them yu loze the interest on the
investment.
Prosecuted for the Devils sake, IL what
sinners git for their allegiance.
Sum people won't beleaye emmy thing
they kant prove; the things can't prove
are the very things beleave the most.
Pride never shows itself more disgust
ingly than in the pomp ov phuneral.
Happiness IL not idleness, but its spirit
IL as free from labor az the life ov yearl
ing heifer. % .-...t-
Good examples among the rulers are the
best laws they kan enakt. -h -
A "gcntleman about town" liz one who
pays cash for everything except hiz debts
Money liz like charity, it kivvers mul
titude ov sins.
A pedant IL one who fills himself in
cellar with the klam broth ov literature
and then picks hiz teeth in the society oN
the learned. lfLI1e
There liz but little ceremony if emmy be
tween two wize men, but between a wiz'
man and a phool, ceremony IL the onl,
thing that will make phool feel rspek
table. i ~
When you find man who IL very solisi
tus about the welfare ov everybody, yor
kan safely put him az one who IL hunting
for A misfortune - Mem York Weekly.