Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1869-04-07
Roasting an a Sand.Rar

OQe morning idSt Nctht a. Justice
Jecho, of st. Louis, was sitting in his
Office porting over reelection returns,
and eongratulating himself on his
good luck in being swindled out of
the nomination for Sheriff, a young
man from the rural district entered
and inquired timidly if the squire
was in. JeehO informed him that he
was a Justice of the peace, and was
sometimes called esquire, (" for short.
"Well, !" said the young man, blush
ing and casting his eyes upon the floor,
what has a fellow got to do in this
State when he wants TO get married?"
1.-The first thing he must do" re-
piled the justice, sis to geta woman"
"Oh, is that all? No nonsense
telling it in church ?"
"Nary license-naTy church. If
he is old enough, and the girl is old
enough, the law considers they are
both big enough, and the rest is no
body's business"
'That's just as easy as rolling of a
log. Think I'll come to Missouri TO
live. They have more freedom here
than over in Illinois whar I come
from. Squire" he continued, laying
his hand familiarly on the judges
shoulder. 1--WE got gal out thar at
the door, and she and me are awful
anxious to get spliced. We had a hard
time stealing away from the old folks,
and had TO come down the Illinois
River in a skifI. Last night we camp
ed on asandbar, and tell you it won't
do to put off the getting married part
any longer. Susan would never for
give me if it was put off, because she
saws there would be talk about our
ro0sting together on 4 saBd-bar.n
'Well, just bring Susan in, and I'll
fix the thing all right in five minutes.
Siegwart, the constable, viii be here
pretty soon, and he will be the wit
ness.n
"All right; she's right out here in
front of pile of cabbages, and I'll
fetch her in at once"
The young man stepped out, and in
a moment returned, accompanied by
a rosy-cheeked damsel, dressed in red
calico with white spots, and wearing
heavy green veil. Lifting UP her
veil, she said,-
"Mister, L don't want any foolin'
about this here marriage. If you are
a real squire, it's all right; but I've
heard of fellers passing themselves off
for 'squires that were no isquires at
all.n
"You see my sign out on the door,
amt that enough to satisfy you? I'll
show you my commission"
''I seed John Jecho, Justice of the
Peace painted on the board; but
there amt nOthin' about squire on
it."
"Oh, it's all the same; we are called
justices in Missouri, not 'squires."
"Well, go ahead-Ill take you at
venture; but if you fool me, you'll
catch it some of these days.n
In short time Siegwart came in,
and the justice told the young couple
to Join hands. They did so, both
bIushing and looking fOndly at each
other. In less than the time mention
| ed the twain were made man and wife;
and when the last words were spoken,
| the bride stepped up to the Justice,
and, putting her lips close TO his,
said.
II s'pOse you want 10 salute the
bride, don't your
Certainly" replied JechO; and,
putting one arm around the neck of
lnc ldug At gave ntA sutn q rAlAth
that Siegwart thought a pane of glass
was broken.
Fire away, squirrel said the bride
groom; take just as many Of them as
you can stand up under; there's plen-
ty left for me, guess
The bridegroom then handed the
! Justice ten dollar bill, and told him
! his first boy should be named John,
and if girl he'd call her Josephine,
/ in honor of the constable He became
communicative, and told a long story
about his eourtship and elOpement.-
/ He said that he and Susan had long
been a hankering after each other, but
I her mother wanted her to marry a
preacher on the,circuit, who had re-
recently lost his wife and had four
children who were suffering for step
mother. Susan DID hot tffxc- ti1e idea
/ of taking care of other peoples chill
dren, and the short and the long of it
was, that one night they stole away
! from the neighborhoOd, and, purchas-
| ing a skiff from a fisherman near Pc
kin, had come down the river to st.
Louis to get married. Thomas said if
the preacher made any fuss about it
he would give him a sound thrashing
when he returned. The happy couple
put up at hotel, intending to remain
two or three days to see the city.