Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1869-10-22
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

FARMERS insure their lives in the Wash
ington of New York.
THE most important part of every mans
education is that which he gives to him.
self
A New IoRK auctioneer announces for
sale oil paintings by some of the ancient
masters of the day"
The reason why plano was not saved
mt Il fire was because none of the firomen
could play on it.
lF you would find a great many faults,
be on the lookout, II you would find
them in still greater abundance, be on the
look in.
WHAT'S the difference between water
and whskyy Men slip on the former
when it's frozen, and on the latter when
il isn't
WHAT is the difference between the la
bOrs of n farmer and scamstrcssY One
gathers what he sows the other sews what
she gathers.
JONES" Poor Lucinda took that cir
cumstanCc very much tn heart" Nibbles
-" Did she, indccdg The dear girl /
wish | was that circumstance"
AN old farmer reports very fair growth
of corn in his section this season. He
states that in July it was so dark between
the rows that he was obliged to carry n
lantern to see TO plow 1t out.
AN unconscious but comical play upon
words was made by little girl, not long
since, while relating To n sympathizing
lady the loss OF two pet calves. "What
caused their deathY" said the lady. 90"
was the answer, zone was hooked to
death, and the other died on its own
hook"
SAID male advocate of woman's rights
"When am in crowded car, and lady
comes in, think 1t is the duty of some
other man to get up and give her his scat.
l look around the car to see if any man in
the crowd looks like making u move in
that direction, and when | see them all
keep their Seats hide my face behind my
newspaper, and blush for my SEX"
A lively New Orleans youth essayed the
role of ghost the other day, and was sound
ly thrashed by those he attempted to
irightcn. He brought suit for assault
with intent to kill. "You wanted to be
ghost, didn't you?" inquired the Court
"lcs, l reckon so" acknowledged the
youth. well, II seems to me rather un-
generous Of you tn wish to punish them
for helping you to become what you
wished"
SOMEBODY recently played practical
Joke ON the officers OF the City Hall build.
ing, ut Lawrence, Kan, by procuring a
black'snakc, six or eight feet long, which
had been killed, and coiling il neatly in.
side the entrance. II repeatedly fright
encd away several parties who come upon
II suddenly, but each returned in force to
kill it, among the rest delegation of the
police force of the place, whose prowcss
was tried in this way by the Sheriff, who
had also been victim. The dead snake
died seven times before its final dssolu.
tion.
THE following letter explains ITSELF and
does credit to the Company and its hon.
omblc managers
NEW YoRK, March Is, 1868
l, N, SToDDARD, EsQ-DEAR SIR:
Your favor of the 10th instant Is nj hand
The premium ON Mr., Johnson's policy
for January was unpaid, and the policy
would have lapscd for non n-paymcnt Of
premium, but for our rule of holding
policies in force while there is any
unused dividend TO its credit This is a
rule peculiar to this company, and its adj
vantage to the policy holder is seNcmplitied
in this instance. Yours Truly,
VI. MITCHELL,
Vice Pres'L Washington Lite
AN exchange has the following anec-
dote A traveller, in going through thin.
ly settled district of Western Pennsylva.
MIA, passed a tumhlcdown log cottage on
the roadside, and his attention was at.
tractcd by n long rough pine board, nailed
up in the fashion of sign, and bearing in
characters of very primitive fashion, this
inscription
my wT QOcres A Gooee
and Qu0res the Gaudcn,
| Utterly contOunded by the mysterious in.
/ timation, he knocked at the door Ia have
the riddle explained, but the cottage. was
empty. lie rode ON, greatly perplexed,
and trying in vain 10 divine the peculiar
relation which this singular family ap.
| pcarcd Ia have established with geese, and
/ Judged of sufficient importance 10 pro.
claim thus ostentati0usly. Presently he
met an old oountryman limping along with
! u stick, and asked him il he knew the
house. 90 yes; live there with my old
woman" And what do you doy" "Wcll,
| you see my old woman and meLare kind OF
doctors like; she cures the fever.nagurs,
and | cures the iAnders." --
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