Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1869-05-27


ton. looking very hot and very niue
confused, appeared from under the IN
derskirt of Mrs. Grubbins' dress
that lady having completely submerge,
the honorable gentleman in the fold
of her drapery. Gentlemen smiled il
their sleeves, and ladies giggled be
hind their handkerchiefs; Mrs. Grub
bins looked more regal than ever, ant
Mr.. Singleton leaned against the pilla
for support.
The announcement of dinner was
great relief. Judge Flanders presided
Mrs. Grubbins occupied the seat a
Singleton's right, Miss Flambeaux sa
at the left, aud Lucy Deane, the villag
belle, was his Wis avis. ld
Harry's position was exceedingl,
embarrassing to one of his pecuha
temperament. He dared not refus
anything that was offered him, les
some one should look at him, and tn
consequence was his plate hterall
groaned beneath its weight of eatables
Tomato sauce his special horror-wa
passed around; a preserve plate ful
was allotted him. He tried hard t
swallow some, but it stuck fast in hi
throat; it choked and sickened him
and set him to coughing violently.
You have taken a severe cold, | pre-
sume," remarked Miss Flambeaux.
eyes, madam, thank you, have, >
returned Singleton, trembling on the
verge of another sneeze.
"Why don't you eat your toma
toes?" queried Mrs Grubbins. my
poor dead and gone Daniel used to say
there was nothing in the whole vegeta.
BILE empire equal to tomatoes"
''No doubt, madam, they are fine;'
and Singleton essayed a second spoon
full. The second dose had well nigl
been too much for him, and with des
perate resolve he watched until the
whole company were engaged in drink
ing toast, when he tilted the preserve
dish and let its contents run into the
napkin. which receptacle he whitfield in
to his pocket without delay, and imme-
diately felt easier. A moment after
Judge Flanders proposed sentiment;
"The Honorable Harry Singleton
May he always retain the title of "Hon-
orable," but may he soon resign bis
right to be called single. 1t isnot good
for man to be alone"
The sentiment was drank with ap-
plause, Singleton blushing red at the
inslnuation conveyed by the words OF
the Judge, thrust his hand in his pock-
ct for his handkerchief, when instead
out came napkin, tomato and all. He
mopped his forehead vigorously with
it, the luscious vegetable formed an
unctious poultice thereon, completely
transfguring his countenance. Blind
ed with the juice and half dead with
modification, he thrust the napkin
back into his pocket and secured the
handkerchief, while the astonished COM
pany beheld him in silent amazement
"Does your nose bleed, sir?' in
quired Mrs. Grubbins, quite audibly.
"What in Heavens name is the mat
ter?" screamed Judge Flanders.
"Ahem! only a slight cold, thank
you, SIR" stammered Mr.. Singleton.
"a cowld is it? Faith now, and
your honor's nose must be afther turn
ing itself inside thin!'' exclaimed Mr..
O'Toole, the Irish orator
Lucy Deane was laughing; Miss
Flambeaux was Mortified; Mrs. Grub
bins looked shocked; our friend Single
ton was nearly suffocating with shame.
He leaned back in his chair to recover
his breath, and as soon as he could
speak he begged to be excused mo-
ment as he did not feel quite we'll
And forthwith he arose and made for
the door; but-horrors of horror!-
he had set on the pocket containing the
napkin of tomato, and his white panta-
looms were dripping with the sanguin
airy vegetable.
A simultaneous shrek burst from all
assembled.
Good Heavens, Mr. Singleton is
wounded! Murder! murderl Call a
physician! seize the murderer! Send
for DR.. Spltpowderl Quick-he'l ii bleed
to death! Murder! murder!"
The infuriated audience rushed hith-
er and thither, and some encountered
John, the waiter, with carving knife
in his hand, took him for the perpe-
traitor of the crime, and seized upon
him without delay. John struggled
and swore, and laid about him with a
right good will, buthe was overpowered
by numbers and obliged to Yield
There was a regular. fight, and black
eyes and swelled noses added largely
to the beauty of the scene. The ladies
fled to the ante room, Judge Flanders
ran for surgeon, and during the me-
lee Singleton made his escape. No
grass grew beneath his feet as he sped
for home; but the night being dark,
and he being slightly frustrated, he un-
fortunately mistook the house, and en-
tered not his own residence, but that
of correct old spinster named Harriet
Willis. The houses were somewhat
similar, and Singleton without pausing
for light, rushed up stairs into his
own chamber, as he thought, breathless
and exhausted he flung himself upon
the bed. 7r s 'El1m
Miss Harriet had retired sometime
previous, and the sudden advent OF
Mr.. Singleton aroused her from a
sound slumber. Springing from the
bed regardless of the fact that her
teeth were out and her "natural curls"
reposing in the bureau-drawer, she
flew to the house of her nearest neigh
Dor, and securing assistance returned
to meet the horri6ed Singleton Just
emerging from the door. 80 on
Poor Harry tried to explain, but
Miss Willis would listen to nothings
her reputation was ruined she said, and
Singleton must either settle or marry
her. A fifty dollar bin was given
freely, mending her broken character,
L