The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1869-06-10
M 4 O 1l1 .a-A. 1TsE-
selia5aa aThoagl1ss.
by Josh, BIrnINas,

BY JOSH BIILINuS.E y , ,g.tS{i'
The fear of God IL the philosophy of
religion; the loyeov God il! the charity
|ovIreligion. ss6to .Aelt-G@tss isad::
Hope il hen that laysl more eggs
than she kan hatch out. !, fsy ~ .A.fc
Better leave your child virtew than
money; but this il o sekret known only
tew o few. teS.''.-'f isg.ts7'
honestly ,beleave it IL better tew
know nothing than 9tew know what
About the hardest work a pheliow kan
do, IL tew spark two gals at,once, land
preserve good average. }atn iisI1,- g.
Prudery iz one Of virtew's bastards.
A,nick-name will outlive emmy man or
thing; it, iz like the crook in a dogg's
taile-youa may cut it opho and throw it
behind the barn, but the crook liz thare
yet. and the stump liz the epitaph.
Ii you analize what most men call
+, plezzure, you will find il composed ov
one part humbugg and two parts pain.
When you hain,t got nothing to do, do
it at once; this il the way to be bizzy..
We have been told that the best way
tew oyerkuml misfortunes liz tew fight
with them. hav tried both ways, and
recommend q successful:d lodge. ,ssss>}5 ~
The art oy becoming ov importance in
the eyes of others IL not to over.rate
ourself, but tew cauze them tew do it. 4,
The true way to understand the 'judg-
ments of Heaven is to submit to- ithen1.,.i
Method liz everything espeshily ttew!
ordinary men (; the few who kan lift tun
at pleasure hav divine right to take holt
ov it tew disadvantage.
The mind ov man liz like piece ov
land, that, tew be useful, must be ma
nured with learning, ploughed with en-
ergy, sown with virtew, and harvested
with ekonemy.
WHARF religion iz trade morality IL
merchan6G ze. ~ =
Conve, sashun should be enliyened
with wit. not composed ov it.
The less man knows the more he will
guess at; and guessing IL nothing more
than suspicion.
Goingftew law liz like skinning new
milch COW for the hide, and giving the
meat to the lawyers.
Death, tew most oy US, liz O kind of
farewell benefit''-''p our last
appearance" -,
Phools are quite often like hornets
very bizzy, but about what the Lord only
knows.
Living on hope il like living on wind;
a good way tew git phull, but poor way
tew git phatt. u.
Jealousy don't pay-the best it can do
liz tew discover what we don't want to
find, nor don't expekt to.
Sekrets are mortgage on friendships.
/ don't think a. bad man liz az danger
that has come tew o he'd liz az risky az
o hidden ono, that may come to dozen
heds.
Avivid imaginashun liz like sum glass
es-makes things at q distance looktwice
az big az they am, and cluss to. twice az
small az they am. ~ ..1. E
Hopeiz draft on futurity, sometimes
honored, but generally extended.
Gq If the world dispizes hypokrit, what
must they, think ov him in Heaven!
Flattery is like Kolore water-tew be
smelt ov, not swallowed. rt
After all, there don't seem tew be but
this difference between the wize men and
the phools-the wize men are all fuss and
sum feathers, while the 'phools are all
fuss and no feathers. iA
I. Without friends and without enemys
il the last reliable ackount we hav oy
stray dog. g1sr eo
Men generally, when they whip mule,
sware; the mule remembers the sware-
ing, but forgits the licking. =:
Oun lOlhS WOuuer Wnare aWl the. lies
cum from, but don't; one good liar will
, pizen whole country.
Hunting after fame IL like hunting
after heas, hard tew ketch, and sure tew
make yu uneazy if you do or don't ketch
them.
Menny people spend their time trieing
tew find the hole WHARF sin got into this
world. If two men brake through the
ice into o mill-pond. they had better
hunt for some good hole tew git out ra-
ther than git into o long argument about
the hole they cum tew to fall in.
Imaginashun, tew much indulged in,
soon is tortured into reality; this iz one
way that good hoss thiefs are made-a
man leans over fence all day, and ima-
gines the hoss in the lot belongs tew
him, and sure enuff, the fust dark night,
the hoss does.
If you must chaw terbacker. young
man, for Heavens sake, chaw old plugg;
it liz the nastyest.
Nearly 1000 persons starved to death
in the great city of London last year.
Wbu ra r,ooI ,o,ol,t:on, ILL.,