The Charleston daily news. [volume] (Charleston, S.C.) 1865-1873, 1869-02-18
ENGAGED PEOPLE.
From the New. York Round Table.


woman, whose eyes or hair or toilette may
have hit his fancy, to be told by disinterested
female friend, with the least possible soupcon
OF malicious triumph, that the object Of his
devotion is engaged. All men who have at
any time mingled in tho diversions of the salon
can can recal! some such experience, and with it,
sooi the unImlstakable I feeling Of wasted op-.
portunlty, the chagrin of loves labor lost,
which the information brought with it.
Even we. whose sveripg hairs have
scarcely softcned the fires Of youth, can re-
memDer the pretty blonde or the fascinating
brunette we danced with vainly for one entire
evening (ehem tugaces) 80 long ago; we can
remember her name, the dimple in her lovely
cheek, the coquettish alurements OF hcr side
| iohB eye; ana we renew again after all these
years the tempest Of rage and loathing that
| tore our manly bosom and threatened The Sc
reaity OF our unruff1ed shirt front as we learn
ed that she was engaged to that Puppy Jones.
Or that scou dre Robinson, as tho case NAV
havebeen. But we did not then what we pro-
pose TO 40 now; we dld not pause to m oralize
on on, ana, II possible to analyze the curious
spalr presupposod aud indicated.
Iho fact is that that peculiar social relation
Wnlch is known as an engagement is among
tho most amusing studies to which the philo-
ssophical student of society can apply himself
10 appreciate it thoroughly. however, he
ought himself to have been engaged at least
once and not more than twice. For repeated
engagements Will have confused the accuracy
OF his recollections and blunted the delicacy OF
his perception to an extent that must mate.
rally dim the light which experience would
otherwlse have shed upon his inquiry. But to
MN, VINO has been once or twice engaged,
who is neither q cynic nor an enthusiast there
is q never-taling fund OF entertainment in
Watching the antics of his nelghbors struggling
in tho net from which some friendly rodsnt of
circumstances has released him. lie will OBJ
serve, in the first place. that for both parties
the situation is slng'larly ulsagreeable. For
both it involves nearly oil the prlvatons, with
out any Of the privileges Of matrlmony. Au-
gustus must leave his club and abandon his
cigar; he must exchange those cosy little din
ners t'o,s pl1ts at the cafe for dreary and
1l-cooked banquets at his intended iather-in-
laws; he must put up with chsfng from his
Dachelor friends, aud he must sacrifice the af-
fectionate and pIatonc regard Of all his female |
acquaintance. OF course, whore man is renl- |
be gladly made; but attcr all, the sincerest af. |
fection in the world will not prevent an en- |
gagged man from feeling that his positici. is
faso IA and fli lrksome n the extreme; Arabeala
and loves you very dearly, though 10
better than you love he yet there are
times when Lucinda for example, who doesn't
care care put button for you, and for whom you care
even less, would be much more agreeable
companion. AT a dancing party, let us say,
vhe,.. % Lucinda waltzes like O sylph and Ara,
bella, der creature that she is, lke-well,
unlike i4ucincS: ana yet your engagement tor
give YOU good parlzer instead of poor
one, and delight instead of torture. So too
ut the opera, where despite your affection, you
cannot help contrasting the cold indifference
goodness, has very little taste for music,
with Luclnda's charming enthusiasm and
appreciative ecstacies Then, AGAIN. at
tue picture gallery, you remember how
sure over chefs doeuores which tho dar-
lne OF your soul passes with most provo
king nonchalance. Now. profound as is your
attachment to your bethrothed, aud firmly as
you M are convinced that she OF all women is des-
tined to make you happy, you cannot deny to
yourself that on all these occasions Lucinda's s
company would be vastly more agreeable. Af-
'er you are married you can enjoy this plea
Ind hirt with Lucinda then to you hearts con-
Eent; you can invite her to join your wife In
little parties to the theatre or the opera or the
you can go 50 far as to kiss her and
every. other pretty girl that will let you, and
nobody minds 1T q bit. 1t is only your way:
You always were wild, and this Is but the inno-
cent freedom Of an old Benedict. But just
Try one of these innocent freedoms while you
md all her femme acq qlaln.spCes, young and :
I'D, buzzlng around your ears like AwaTm ~
nraged hornets.
- .s luis Sense Of confinement and restraint ! l
hat makes the period OF betroihal rksome for t
ven tho most ardent lover. And for the lady
t is even. worse. From the fatal moment CT ,
er official announcement there is an end of oil
nose sweet obselvauces wherewith she was '
ostman comes to her freighted with store Of b
alnty mlsslyes. gllt-edged and perfumed, nv- I
atoms to ball, or opera, or play, the newest :
'atz. the latest novel; no longer her boudolr !.
J made fragrant with the spolls of aozen
orsts no longer score Of eager cavaliers q
ontend for the honor of her hand at every ]
ance no longer she goes forth in promenade Z
nd park like Horace's Barine !
"Juvenum y s. #
Puol1ca: ara.
For ali these various Joys. for notes and
owefs for books and music, and invitations,
'r escort and partners, even for the flttering
omaRe OF admlrlng eyes, she must depend
Q augustus, Who ten chances to one, never | Q
bsnks of flowers or music, never goes to the
heatre, perhaps-O horror1-does not even
lance. And IN the latter case he is sure to be
he veriest dog in the manger, and 10 object
VIOLENTLY to his beloved danc,ng wath any body
slse. Could the art OF her bitterest female
enemy Gevlse tor her more pit1able situation ?
AS we have said. for two people who love
each other truly, these little annoya,,ces, it will
be said, are very trihng and easily to be en-
dured. But tse siuoercst love cannot alto
9ether relieve from monotony an intercourse
ment lies in anticipation. After the first brief
flush OF assured success, when PASSIONS catn-
logue Of pretty lnanltes is exhausted il is
hard to imagine what engaged people lind to
throws them together VIII ch OF us has q
friend. male or female: that he Gould endure
to talk to night after night for year together,
with no change and no release? And what
glamour has love so zAuch moro potent than
to make us find variety in mon
otony itself? 1.-The course OF true love
never dld run smooth" only from the moment
it began to run smooth it ceased to te true
love. Passion feeds on difficulty, and romance
is it's hfe-breath. he bumdrum quiet and
frosaic realities Of an engagement are apt to
Cool the ardor and dissipate the illusions
which usually prompt proposal. aud perhaps
in this way. by giving chance to correct an
error before it is irretrievable, engagements
do good. From this point of view the practice
is worthy Of encouragement. but 1t must be
frightfully stupid for the engaged. Perhaps,
after all there is more wisdom in the old plan
OF marrying in haste and repent at leisure; for
as repentance is pretty sure to come at ANY
rate, 1t may be as well to avoid this prelimins-
ry ennui.