Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1869-09-16
IkthOlogy-by Josh Billings.
TILE pNIIYWnGG

LIE IOLL1WOGG.
IHE pollywogg IL created by The sides
ov the road out ov thick water, and spends
hiz infancy in pollywogging,
After he haz got through pollywogginp
he makes up his mind that this world
want made for pollywogs, and "nothinc
venture nothing have and then he turns
his attenshun to bigger things
lie looks out upon life with the eve oy
wlsdum, and studying the various ami
mails Oy creashun, he Gums tew the kon-
kluslon that the best thing he can do is
tew bekum frog
ms IL the way that frogs fust cum tew
be made, and pollywoggs few be lost.
The pollywOgg now leaves the water,
and spends part o. his summers upon
land.
He haz tew fife his way through life
and generally goes on the jump
Being better at diving than he IL at
dodgeing, he often runs hiz he'd aginst
sticks and stuns that the BOYS throw at
him, but hiz two mortal enemys are the
Frenchman and the striped snak.
The Frenchman IL satisfied with biz
hind leggs, but the snaik swallows him
whole
| hay seen sum good time made by the
frog and the snaik, the snaik after the frog.
and the frog after dear life.
If the frog kan only reach tree and
klimb it, he IL safe, for snaik kant travel
a tree
| don't kno az the pollywogg gains emmy
thing by shopping himself oph for frog,
unless it IL experience, but | never hav
BIN able to diskovC. Lch ov emmy happi-
ness in experience.
II experience ever made man happy, /
should have happiness to SELL for am one
OF them happy phellows who never
found cnnything (not even the bite of a
lobster only through the kindess of ey-
perience.
THE BULL HEAD.
This remarkable beast of prey dwells
in mill ponds and mud puddles cluss to
the ground, and lives upon young lizards
and dirt
They have no taste to their mouths. and
never spit out cnnything that they kan
swallO
They have two ugly black lhorns stick
ing out on the sides ov their he'd and are
az dangerous to handle az a iX-bladed
pen-knlfe, with the blades all open to
Onst
They are like kat; you have got to
skin them before they are fit to eat, and
after they are thoroughly cooked, if you
set them away in the cupboard until they
git cold, they will begin life anew, and be-
come az raw az a live mule.
They will live, after they are ded, az
long AZ striped snaik kan
| don't advise emmy man to fish for bull
head, but il yu feel az tho yu must, this IL
the only best way to do it.
Take dark, hot, drizzly night in the
month ov June steal out quietly from
home; tell yure folks yu are going tew the
nabors to borry setting of henn's eggs;
find saw-log on the banks of a stagnant
mill-pond, one end Of which lays in the
water drive the mudturkleS and water
snaks oph from the log; straddle the log,
and let yure leggs hang in the water up
tew yure garters bait yure hook with a
chunk Of old init n-rubber shoe az fast az
you pull up the bull.heads, take them by
the back oy the neck and stab their horns
into the saw-log; when yu hav got the
saw-log stuck full, shoulder the saE-log,
and leave for home; git up the next
morning early, skin the bull-heds, and
split up the saw-log into kindling wood,
let yure wife cook them for breakfast, and
sware the whole family to keep dark
about it.
This IL the only respektabel way to hav
enneything to do with bull-heads