Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1869-09-30
MisfelIanenms.
Mark Twain.-Lsst Words of Great Men
Failure OF the System.


Failure OF the System.
From the Buffalo Express.
Mashal Niers last words were: "L'arnsee Fraa-
coise 20 cThe French army Exchange.
What sad thing tits to see a man
close grand career with plagiarism in
his mouth. Napoieon's last words were
1ete d'0rmec." head of the army.
Neither of these remarks amounts to any
thing as "last words" and reflect little
creditupon the utterers. A distinguished
man should be as particular about his
last words as he is about his last breath
He should write them out on a slip OF
paper and take the Judgment. of his
friends on them.
He should never leave such thing to
the las. hour of his life, and trust to an
intellectual squirt at the last moment to
enable him TO say something smart with
his latest gasp, and launch into eternity
with grandeur. No-a man is too much
tagged and exhausted both in body and
mind, at such time, to be reliable; and
may be, the very thing he wants TO sa ,
he cannot think of to save him; and be-
sides, there are his weeping friends
bethering around; and worse than all as
likely as not he may have to deliver his
last gasp when he is not expecting to. A
man can not always expect to think of II
natty thing to say under such circum-
stances. and SO it is pure egotistic osten-
tation to put it of. There is hardly a
case on record where man came to his
last moment unprepared and said good
thlng-hardly case where man trust
ed TO that last moment and did not make
a solemn botch of it, aud go out of the
world feeling absurd.
. tnr ii
body could tell him anything. He was
not afraid. He could do something neat
when the time came. And how did il
turn OUT? Why, his will had to be fixed
over; and then all his relations came;
and first one thing and then another
interfered, till at last he only had u
chance TO say 81 still live," aud up he
went. or course, he didn't still live,
because he died-and so he might as we'll
have kept his last word to himself as to
have gone and made such q failure of il
as that. "A week before that, fifteen
minutes would have enabled that man
to contrive some last word~ that would
have been credit to himself and con-
fort tohis family for generations to come.
And there was John Quincy Adams
Relying on his splendid abilities and his
coolness in emergencies, he trusted to a
happy hit at the last moment to carry
him through, and what was the result?
-Daati ID snaose- -tsitss 4 - the Heaeeof Repre-
sentatives. and he observed, casualty.
"This is the last of earth.n The last OF
earth! Why the ''last of earth" when
there is so much more left? 1.-The had
said It was the last rose of summer, or
the last run of shade, it would have had
just as much point to it. What he
meant to say, WIS. Adam was the first,
and Adams is the last of eartb, ," but he
put 1t OFF too long, and so had to go
with that unmeanin9 observation on lis
lips. G. Cn tsJ2 faFIi4!jeGe s'g19
And there we have Napoleon. "Tete
d'orDaee." That don't mean anything.
Taken by itself, Head of the army' is
no more important than Head OF the
police" And yet that was a man who
could have said good thing if he had
barred out the doctor and studied over
1t awhile. And this Marshal Neil, with
half century at his disposal, couldn't
dash off anything better in his last mo-
ments than poor plagiarism of another
mans last words, which were Eot worth
plagiarizing in the first place. 1.-The
French Army" Perfectly irrelevant
perfectly fat-utterly pointless. But if
he had closed one eye significantly and
said, ''The subscriber has made it EueLu
for the French Army" and then thrown
q little of the comic into his last gasp.
1t would have been thing to remember
with satisfaction the rest of his life. /
do wish our great men would quit say
ing these fat things just at the moment
they die. Let us have their next-to-
their-iast words for awhile, and see if we
cannot patch up something from them
that will be. a little more satisfactory.
The public does not wish to be outraged
IN this way all the time. . = -f:d
But when we come to call to mind the
last words OF fparties who took hetrouble
to make proper preparation for the oc-
casion, we Immediately notice happy
difference In the result.
There was Chesterfield. Lord Chester
field had labored all his life to build up
The most shining reputation for affabil.
ity and elegance of speech and manners
the world has ever seen. And could you
suppose he failed to appreciate the eff
cheney of characteristic "last wordsu in
the matter of seizing the successfully
driven nail of such a reputation and
it on the other side for ever?
Not he. He prepared himself He kept
his eye on the clock and his finger on
his pulse. He awaited his chance. And
at last, when he knew his time was
come, he pretended to think new visi-
tor had entered, and so, " tn the rattle
In his throat emphasized for dramatic
effect, he said to the servant: s"Shin
John, and get the gentleman a
chair" And then he died, amid thun
ders of applause.
Next we have Benjamin Franklin.
/
Avondales New Tale of wyoming.
Donald u. Mitchell, in Hearth anu Home f,
In the old days when Hohenlin;ien |
was spoken on the Ol-platforms. and
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