Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1869-02-12
HT NOR SOME
The late-, .a>hion-nisht CAPS.

The latest a>hion-nisht caps.
The lady who hu,baa.ieI her means w,.a sin
gle woman
The essay on min-a woman attenftto liar-
ry him.
It is mistake to suppose the sun is supported
ia the skies 10y it, beams.
very unpopular officer for indolent lal.s=-
General H0usework.
If young man should toast the girl OF his
heart. is that any reason Why he should b. l5-
barrel from any but her
A physician thinks the Greoan bvuiers viii
soon ask his profession, IS Can-t thru not minis
ter to a spine disease'd-''
A was thus eulosises his m,,,i;al attaiumeuts;
- know two tunes-the one j. Aud Lang
Syne.' and the other isn't. I always sing the
latter
- There now, said ht5le girl while rum
maging a bureau drawer, - grandpa La. -ons
to Heaven without his spectaeles' 80
s. All dis fuss, said the Hebrea in the eft
ing house when a thunder storm came ur,
'' shust pceluse poor Shew eats a lit Of bt-
cen"
.
habit Of wearing low necked dresses, who CAP
ried of a matrimonial prize in the shape o.,
rich Old widower, that IS she wen the .ac, D., a
neck ~
&c an afraid you have a settiel meli-chaly.'
said a landly to a cldsyero1s lodger. &c ~.
madame, he repliei '' my melancholy wou't
settle like your coffee, it has too mu,h
grounds. -
An advertising reviyalist in Cleveland healed
his posters for a meeting with ' hat shall
do to be saved - An enterprising vendor of
nostrums pasted directly under the ques.ir
IS Use Dr. Quackenbosh's bitters.' -
.. Do you reilly believe, Admiral .,ila
Washington lady 10 Admiral Farragut. Sc tlnt
the dead walk after death - ." have Rot
doubt Of it, madam replied the gallaH, A iaii-
raj, Z" for have myselfheard the Dead Mach
in SluL''
4 Texan negro Was overheard making au
honorable apology in this wise '' jes slil,
Slmbo, dat you led dat is l jes said dat yoa
lid Den Jim told me you said you'd Kill me,
an I'D if you killed NE I'd Kill You The
explanation was satisfactory
Massachusetts divine lost his notes in the
crack Of his pulpit Finding their recovery I'M
possible, he said ." My dear friends, brought
my notes with me this morning, have got itcm
into this provoking crack, and can't get them
out tut will read two chapters in tie book Of
/ Job, which are worth two such sermons, If hal
| them"
\ Boston reporter thus describes his expert
ence in seeking information. He boards the
| French barque ST., and asks the Captain
a question. No speake de Anglais on rs
| sheep, de nigre cook Espanal" Reporter 10
| cook Hablar Espanal, Sener?' Cook No
mucho. pero Ia carpentaire sperke n Eng ling
/ little bit" Reporter TO carpenter-' What vas
| the missing mans name 80 Carpenter" Va
/ vol nix spranken mil de English ioost van, fri
/ ocht" Reporter leaves in disgust.
| speculator, who hal immense tracts Of
/ land away in the far West, used frequently 20
| say that a gentleman who travelled there, siw a
| very old man, sitting at the door Of log cabin,
/ crying bitterly. Z" My friend, - said the gentle
/ man. what Is thematter with you?''
- why" replied the Old man, 81 daddy has
/ been giving me a licking, COS I wouldn't rock
| grand-daddy to sleep - The gentleman rode
OF fully satisfied Of the salubrity Of place that
hal such instances Of longevity.