The Portland daily press., 1869-09-09
Miscellany.
TROUBLES AND TRIALS OF A NEWSPAPER
CnRREspnN nErr

CORRESPONDENT.
haven't dated this letter because | don't
know where l am. | am about nine miles
from JuleSbarg, at little settlement on the
South Platte river. At daylight tomorrow /
am 10 catch some of the finest salmon vo,,
ever saw. They will not bite at anv otbor
time of day. I suppose they learned this , de-
agreeable habit of early breakfastinc from, a.
Bull Whackers" who navigate these nlainS
am stopping at little hotel about thirty hv
ten ieet Inc searcest thing in this conntry
IS LUMBER, settlers having to pay ever so many
tI,an h,a . III. 'oi what they use, besides what
is from Pennsylvania. and seems to he doing
thriving business. BY dint of hard talking
ana nDe@l promises | got room to myself.
itis Just large enough for the bed and candle
Dox set on chair, upon which | am writing
this letter. IL is in one end Of the building,
and separated from the next room by bed
quilt, which you must crawl under to come in
or get out. But it is my room, and after the
joting l have had upon the Indian popy.
expect to have good nights -
Was ever poor pilgrim in such a fix?
just as had written nights above. and
had sleep on the point of my pen, | heard
a knocking en- the floor, outside the bed
guilt.
Crawl UNDER" said |.
Enter the landlords daughter, o buxom
young lady, about seventeen years Of age, I
should Judge. She opened her rosy lips and
spake as follow:
Mister, don't take off your clothes TO- night
when you 60 TO bed"
"Why ?o aH
sBs@use I am going to sleep with you"
well: il you have no better reason than
that"
Hush! Shut ap! You told pa you would
rot sleep with man."
II had rather sleep with wet dog"
well, have given up my bed to . sick
nan. l have been hard at work all day and
have to work hard all day tomorrow, and
Cannot ahord to set up all night. That bed
Is wide9enoush for as both. shall stay on the
Dsch Tse and hyou don't stay on your side,
you'd better, that's ALL"
AS she said this she raised from her dress
pocket an Internal jack knife, such as farmers
use IN trimming fruit trees and then let it fall
back with chug. comprehended the stu
asloh IN nan moment, and unto this maiden
iquoth az folows SD
Miss, young lady, your attentions may, or
may not be, honorable. l am travelling en-
urely by myself. My natural protectors are
mics and miles away beyond the boundless
prairie, ignorant OF the perils that may beset
thelr idol. Thus far l have not been insuted
DJ your sex. l am man of few words,
put they are always emphatic. l will give
ycn part OF that bed, and that's all will do.
Hyou attempt during the silent watches OF
ne night anything contrary to this firm de-
nrnsiinstion, by St. Joseph, my patron saint,
VIII shoot you right through the midrif"
AS concluded, l laid Slocum pistol upon
the cendle-box. A low chuckle outside the
bedqaiit gave evidence that paterfdmiias
lad heard and approved the arrangement.
Ny antagonist laughed and saying sinister,
reckon We understand each ether,n bounced
ever - the back side of the bed. There she is
now, pretending to be asleep. can't finish
tAS letter. can't do anything. Talk about
~ trials OF the earlier saints-about being
naJed alive-absut being boiled in oil. What
WAS al that to this !-C0rrespondent Louis
vile Cypress. -