Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1869-10-13
AQUAKER DETECTIVE.

sect and dcOnfined his speeches, as manI
4 parliamentarian would save his credi
by doing, to simple yeas and mays =
As for myself ! make it an invariablt
rule Of the road TO be merely lOOkeT-Ol
and listener.
Toward evening, ! was aroused from
one of those reveries into which yOun;
man without either being a poet or
lover, will sometimes fall, by the abrUp
Z query from the talkative gentleman:
Are you armed sir p
Il am not, I answered, aStOnished, n'
doubt yisibly, at the question.
4 am sorry to hear it, he replied; 10
before reaching our next stopping place
il viii be several hours in the night, anC
we must pass over a portion of the rOaC
on which more than one robbery IS re
ported to have been committed
The ladies turned pale, but the strang
er done his best to Teassure them.
Not that I think there is the slightes
danger at present. he resumed; only
when one is responsible for the safety
of ladies, you know, such thingas {
pistol in reach would materially add Il
ones confidence
Your principles, my friend, address
ing the Quaker, 'Ipresume are as much
. opposed 10 carrying as to using carnaI
weapons
Yea was the response.
Have the villains murdered any Ot
/ their victims % the elderly lady neTv.
ously inquired.
'Or have they contented themselves
with-plundering them 2 added the
younger, in timOrOus voice.
Decidedly the latter the amiable
gentleman FASTENED to give assurance
4 2
offer resistance in case of attack, moth
/ ing worse than robbery can possibly be-
fall US
/ Then after blaming his thoughtless.
( ness in having unnecessarily intrOduC.
J ed disagreeable subject, that gentle
man quite eXceled himself in efforts tC
iTaise the spirits of the company, and
! succeeded SO well by the time night set
! in, that all had quite forgotten, or only
/ remembered their fears to laugh al
/ them.
| Our genial companion fairly talked him
/ self hoarse. Perceiving which he took
/ from his pocket q package Of newly in
vented Cough candy, aud having pass
\ ed it first TO the ladies he helped linn
self to the balance andtOssed the paper
out Of the window ~
! He was in the midst of high enCO-
miums on the new nostrum, more than
half the efficacy Of which, he insisted,
depended on its being taken by suction,
when a shrill whistle was heard, and
almost Immediately the coach stopped,
while two faces hideOusly blackened,
presented themselves, one at each Win
dow.
Sorry to trouble you said the man
( On the right, acknowledging with bow
the lady-like screams from the back
/ seat, but business is business, and ours
/ will soon be over, if things go smoothly
OF course, gentlemen, you will spare
as far as may be consistent with YOU
disagreeable duty, the feelings Of these
ladies' appealed the polite passenger il
his blandest manner.
fOh! certainly; they shall be FIRST at
tended to, and shall not be required t.
leave their places, or submit to a search
unless their conduct renders it necessa
Iry.'
Amy how, ladies, continued the rob
Der, the barrel Of his pistol cleaning il
/ the light of the coach lamp, 'be so gOoC
as to pass out your purses, watches, anC
such other trinkets as may be accessi
bic without much trouble
The ladies came down handsomely
land were not further molested.
One by one the rest of US were com
Epelled to get out, the middle-aged gen
tleman coming first. He submitted
with winning grace, and was robbed
like a very Chesterfield.
; My own affair, like, the sum lost, i.
scarcely worth mentioning The Qua
ker's turn came next. He quietly hand
ed over isAgOoketbook and watch anC
when asked If he had anAQther valu
ables, said Nay l-
A Quaker's word is good even among
thieves : sOs after S-hasty goodnight,
the robber thrust Ahis- pistol into hi.
pocket, and, with his two companions
one of whom had held the reins of tn,
leader, was about making his departure
'StOpI exclaimed the Quaker, in :
tone more of command than request.
Stop! what for" returned the Othel
in evident surprise.
For at least two good reasons wa
the reply, emphasized with q couple o
Derringers cooked and presented.
Help p shouted the rObber
Stop the Quaker again exclaimed -
'And if any Of thy sinful companions
advances a step to thy relief, the spiri
will surely move me to blow thy brain
out'
The robber at the opposite window
and the one at the leaders, heads
thought it O good time to leave.
Now get in friend, said the Quaker
r still covering the man, 'and take thr
middle seat; but first deliver up tn!
z pistol.
The other hesitated.
Thee had better not delay l feel tht
tspirit beginning to move my right for
fingerh a.
The robber did ashe was ditected, anc
the Quaker took his place by his side
giving the new conner the middle of tht
D seat.
The driver, almost frightened out o
his wits, now set forward at a rapid rate
The lively gentleman soon recovered
his vivacity. He was especially faceti
Gus on the Quaker's proves.
You're rum Quaker, you are, VIII!
iyoU don't quake worth a cent
I'm not shaking Quaker, if that
what thee means
'Of the Hickory or rather of tn
old Hickory stripe, should say, re
torted the lively man; but the Quake
relapsing into his usual monosylable
} the conversation tagged.
Time sped, and sooner than we expect
cd, the coach stopped where we were t
have supper and q change Of horses. -
We had deferred a redistribution of OH
= effects till we should leave this place, a
the dim light of the coach lamp Yoult
have rendered the process somowha
difficult before. Itwas now necessary
J however, that ii should he attended +
: at once, aS our iOviai companion hat
previously announced his intention @
, leaving US at this point. lie proposed
: pOstponement till after supper, which b
offered to 90 and order.
Nav urged the Quaker, with an aU
pr0ach to ab~uptue @, and LAYING This han
on the others arm, business hefor
pleasure, and for business there is n
time like the present
'WilI thee bc good enough to scare
, the prisonpr?' he -aid to me, still keeI
ing hi~ hand in q friendly way, on tn
passengers arm.
did 50, 6m not one Of the stolen a'
tic7eg could be found.
He must have got rid of them in tn
COACH the gay gentleman suggested