The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1869-08-20


reproach myself with neglect, not of any real
duty perhaps, but of those little cares and kind
nesses that solace homesick spirits, and make
the heavier hours pass easier. John looked
lonely and forsaken Just then, as he sat with
bent head, hands folded on his knee, and no out
ward sign of suffering till, locking nearer, saw
great tears roll down and drop upon the toor.
1t was a new sight there; for though had seen
many suffer, some swore, some groaned most en-
dured silently, but none wept. Yet it did not
seem weak, only very touching, and straight
way my fear vanished, my heart opened wide
and took him in, as, gathering the bent head IN
my arms, as freely as if he had been lttle
child, / said, Let me help you bear it, John.
Never, on any human countenance, nave
seen so swift and beautiful a look of gratitude,
surprise and comfort, as that which answered
me more eloquently than the whispered
"Thank you, ma am, this is right good. TINS Is
what wanted!n
"Then why not ask for it beiore?'
81 didn't like to be troubles you seemed so
busy, and could manage to get on alone
You shall not want II any more, John.
Nor did he for now understood the Wlsttul
look that sometimes followed me, rs | went out,
after a brief pause beside his bed or merely
passing nod while busted with those who
seemed to need me more than he, because more
urgent in their demands Now / knew that to
him, as to so many, l was the poor substitute for
mother wife, or sister, and in his eyes no
stranger, but friend who hitherto had seemed
neglectful; for in his modesty, he had never
guessed the truth. This was changed now; and
through the tedious operation of probing, bath
ing, and dressing his wounds, he leaned against
me, holding my hand fast, and, if pain wrung
lurthcr tears from him, 80 one saw them fall but
me. When he laid down again. hoyered about
him, in remorseful state of mind that would
not let me rest till ! had bathed his face,
brushed his bonny brown hair set all things
smooth about him. aid laid knot of heath and
heliotrope on his cleah pillow. While doing
this, he watched me with the satisfied expression
] 50 liked to see; and when | offered the little
l.,11 =.
smoothcd a ruifled leaf or two, surveyed and
smet it with an air of genuine delight and lay
contentedly regarding the glimmer of the sun
shine on the green. Although the manifest man
among my forty he said. "Ics, ma'am,' like q
little boy; received suggestions for his comfort
with the quick smile that frightened his whole
face; and now and then, as l stood tdyng the ta-
bic by his bed, felt him softly touch my gown, as
if to assure himself that | was there. ANYTHING
more natural and frank never saw, and found
this brave John as bashful rs brave. yet full of
eXceencies and fine aspirations, which, having
no power to express themselves in words,
seemed to have bloomed into his character and
made him what he was.
After that night an hour of each evening Ch at
remained to him was devoted to his ease or
pleasure. lie could not talk much, for breath
was precious. and he spoke in whispers; but
from occasional conversations, ] CLEANED scraps
of private history which only added to the affec-
tion and respect felt for him. Once he asked
me write a letter, and as | settled pen and paper
! said, with an irrepressible glimmer of feminine
curiosity, "Shall it be addressed to wife, or
mother John!n
Neither, ma'am; I've Got no wife, and will
write to mother myself when get better. Did
you think | was married because of this?" he
asked, touching plain ring he were, and often
turned thougbtfully on his finger when he lay
alone.
Partly that, but more from a settled sort of
look you hayci Il look which young men seldom
get until they marry"
Il didn't know that but I'm not so very young
ma'am, thirty in May and have been what you
might call settled this ten years. Mothers Il
widow, I'm the oldest child she has, and it
WOuldn I do Tor me to marry until LIZZy has a
home of her OWn and Jacks learned his trade;
for were not rich, and must be father to the
children and husband to the dear old woman, if
| can"
mo doubt but you are both. John; yet how
came you to go to war; if you felt so? w asn't
cnsting rs bad as marrying?'
mo, maum, not as | see it, for one is helping
my ncighbor the other pleasing myself. |
went because | couldn't help it. | didn't want
the glory or the pay; l wanted the right thing
done, and people kept saying the men who were
in earnest ought to fight. | was in earnest, the
Lord knows! but l held off as long rs | could,
not knowing which was my duty. Mother saw
the case, COVE me her ring to keep me steady,
and said CO. so | went"
A short sCorT and a simple one, but the man
and the mother were portrayed better than
pages o. fine writing could have done it.
"Do you ever regret that you came, when you
lie here suffering so much!'
Never. ma am; ! haven't helped great deal,
! but I've shown | was willing to give my life, and
perhaps I've got to; but don't blame anybody,
! and if it was to do over again, I'd do it. I'm a
| little sorry wasn't wounded in front; it looks
| cOwardly TO be hit in the back but | obeyed or
| ders, and it don't matter in the end, know
| Poor John! it did not matter now, except that
| a shot in front might have spared the long
| agony in store for him. He seemed to read the
thought that Iroubled me, MS he spoke so hope
fully when there was nc hope, for he suddenly
added
This is my first battle; do they think it's go
ing to be my last?'
I'm afraid they do, John
1t was the hardest question had ever been
| called upon to answer; doubly hard with those
| clear eyes fixed on mine, forcing a truthful an
| swer by their own truth. lie seemed a little
startled ut first, pOndered over the fateful fact
moment then shook his head, with glance AZ
the broad chest and muscular limbs stretched
out before him:-
I'm not afraid, but it's difficult to behave nj
Mt once. I'm so strong it don't seem p0ssibl,
for such little wound to kill me-"
Merry Mercutios dying words glsuc ed through
| my memory as he spOke:-'"'Tis no.. so deep AZ
| a well, nor so wide as a church = ,oor but Iii
enough And John would have said the same
could he have seen the ominOts black holes be
tween his shoulders; he never j. ad but seeing tn,
glastly sights about him, could not believe hi
own wound more fatal thon these, for all th'
| suffering ii caused him.
'Shall write TO coBr mother, now?" asked
thinking that tb$sS sudden tidings might chang
all plans and purposes. But they qua NOT 10 10
the man received the order of the DIVINE com
mander to match with the same unquesIloillus
obedience with which the soldier hIu loIo.h ., "
that Of thcguman one doubtless t iost =
that the 1frst led him to life, ana Vne l'S'
| =,