The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1869-09-25
MiScellamp.
Madam Scandal.

had been trying to create a fuss !" In the family
between these old companions. But much to his
modification, he had not been able to induce the
old gentleman to grumble about breakfast too
Late, or the old lady to give single curtain lee
ture. After repeated efforts the devil became
discouraged, and had he not been person Of very
great determination, he would doubtless have
given the work up in despair. One day as he
walked along in a very surly mood after another
attempt to get the old lady to quarrel about the
pig getting into the yard, he met an old lady,
neighbor of the couple. As Mr. d. and the neigh
Dor were particular friends, they must need stop
on their way and chat little.
"Good morning, sir" said the bag, "and pray
what on earth makes you look 30 bad this morn.
ing2 Isn't the controversy between the churches
doing servicef"
'Yes!"
"Isnt Deacon w. making plenty of very bad
whisky,
"Yesp
master ?" 900 z.
Everything is going on well enough, but old
Blueford and his wife are iniuring the cause ter.
ribly by their bad example, and trying for hours
to do right, must say consider them hopeless"
replied the devil.
The hag stood for moment in deep medi-
tation.
care you sure that you have tried in every
wayp"
"Every way that can think off,
"Are you certain ?"
"Well if you will promise to make pres
ent of new pair of shoes in case succeed,
will make the attempt myself, and see if
make quarrel between them"
To this reasonable request the devil gladly
sented. The old bag went to old Bluefords
house, and found Mrs. Blueford busily engaged
in getting things ready for her husbands comfort
on his return from work. After the usual COM
pliments had passed, the following dialogue took
place:
"Well, friend B., you and Mr.. B. have lived
long time together"
Five and twenty years, come November" re-
piled Mrs B.
Sand all this long time you have never had
quarrel" r ~af
"Not one"
II am truly glad to hear it," continued the
bag II consider it my duty to warn you in this
sase though you must not expect it always.
Have you not observed that of late Mr.. B. has
grown peevish and cross at times 2"
"a very little So" observed Mrs. B.
II knew it," observed the bag "and let me warn
you to be on your guard"
Mrs. B. did not think she had better do so but
asked for advice to how she should manage
the case. --g
"Have you noticed" said the hag, 'sthat your
husband has bunch of long harsh hair growing
under his chin on the side of his throat 2"
Eyes" -s.'rr'as .r.t-f .aufe. it..ntW
"That will be the cause of trouble, aud so long
as the tuft remains you had better look out. Now
a. q friend, would advise you to cut those hairs
of, the first chance You get, and thus end the
trouble, for so long as they remain you had best
look out" yta5
Soon after she started for home and made it
convenient to meet Mr.. B. on the way. Much
the same talk in relation to his domestic happi-
ness between him and the old lady. -
"But, friend Bueford,' said she, II think it
my duty as Christian to warn you to be on
your guard, for your wife is Intending to ruin
you"
Old Mr.. B. was very much astonshed yet he
could not wholly discredit her words. When he
reached home he threw himself on bed in per.
plexity, and feigning sleep, studied the matter
in his mind. His wife thinking this good OPP
portunity for cutting off the obnoxious hair took
her husbands razor, and crept softly to his side.
Now the old lady was much frightened at hold.
ing razor so close to her husbands neck, and
her hand was not so steady as it once had been
30, between the two. she went to work very awk- |
wardly and pulled the hairs instead of cutting |
them of. Mr.. b. opened his eyes, and there stood
his wife with razor At his throat.-After what |
he had been told and seeing this. he could not |
doubt but that she intended to murder him. He |
sprang from the bed in horror and no explains 4
trary. So from that time there was ]awipg, quar-
reling and wrangling all the time. With delight |
the devil heard of the of his faithful EN-.
missary, and sent her word if she would meet
him at the end of the lane at certain time he !
would pay her the shoes At the appointed |
time she repaired to- the spot, and found the devil
at the place He put the shoes on pole, and |
standing on the opposite side of the fence, hand
ed them to her. She was much pleased with them
they were exactly the article.
"But there is thing, Mr., Devil, would |
like to have explained; that is why you hand |
them to me with stick? 2"
"Very easy to explain" replied he.-"Any one
who has the cunning and meanness to do as you
have done don't get nearer than twenty feet of
me- So saying, he fled in terror.
After while the old woman died, and when
she applied for admission to the lower regions, |
the devil would not let her in for fear she might
oethrone him. ss she was much his superior. So
the oid woman Is yet condemned to wander over
the world creating quarres and strife in peaceful
families and neighborhood,. rrt,rr,..
Weuld you know her name ~ .I 81 Ut.'t
1t is Madam Scandal When she died the
young Scandals were left orphans. but the devil.
In consideration of the service done by the moth
or, adopted them and you see he il father 10
the respectable class called very properly Scan.
dalmongers.
Reader, don't you know some Of the family ?
FOREIGN ACuMEN.-The Illustration, of Paris
gives portrait of "The General Fremont and
IL.