davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
Thomas JeRersOn's Great
Nheeae.

The last number of Littel's Living
Age contains an interesting article of
EHhu Burrit's from the Gentleman's
Magazine, on the great CHEESE (which
the people of Cheshire, Massachusetts,
made for Thomas Jefferson. Elder
John Leland was a great pulpit poll
tician in those days, and preached to
the people Of Cheshire such stirring
Jefferson Democracy, that for genera
tinns they never voted anything but Il
straight Democratic ticket. When
Jefferson was chosen President after a
contest of tremendous excitement, e.
der John Leland proposed that his
flock should celebrate the victory by
making for the Chief Magistrate the
biggest cheese the world had ever
seen. Every man and woman who
owned COW, WAS to give for this
cheese all the milk yielded on Ger
tain day-Only no Federal COW must
contribute a drop. A huge cider press
was fitted up to make it in, and on
the appointed day the whole country
turned out with pals and tubs of curd,
the girls and women in their best
gowns and ribbons, and the men in
their Sunday coats and clean shirt col
lars. The cheese was put to press
with prayer, and hymn-sinXing, and
great solemnity. When it was well
dried it weighed 900 pounds, and as
it could not be trusted on wheels, it
waited till mid-winter, when it was
placed on a Sleigh, and Elder John LIE
land drove with it all the way to
Washington. (Thcre was more snow
you see in those days than there is
nOw.) 1t was a journey of three
weeks. All the country had heard OF
the big cheese and came out to look
at it as the Elder drove along. When
he got to Washington, Mr.. Jefferson
received him in state, made speech,
and in the presence of the heads of de-
partmpnts, foreign ministers, and 9th
er distinguished persons, cut thecheesC
and served some Of it around with
bread. Then he sent a wedge of il
home to the makers, and when it ar
rived they also ate it in state. We are
further informed that the cheese was
very good.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
WHAT WILL BECOME OF Us2
The SUMS Evil Intentions To-
ward the EnrIh.


The suns atmosphere, say the sci.
entific men, is in q highly excited
condition. A column of magnetic
light is shooting out further and fur.
ther from the solar sphere, and it is
now stretching Out forty five millions
Of miles. In other words it has &C
compished half the distance between
us and the sun. The interesting
question, and one on which, perhaps,
we do not wish any more light of this
character, is, how long will it be be-
fore it finishes the rest of the distance
and bridges the gigantic chasm be-
tween the earth and the sun is it Il
messenger sent out to snatch us up as
food for the insatiate monster that
keeps himself warm by devouring
planets, and whose 6re-cating pro-
pensilies this whole earth would sat
isfy tor few days only? Ii so, how
long will this emissary be in reaching
us, and carrying the globe away as if
we were Il gigantic lump Of coal for
a roaring furnace? This column of
light ut intervals indicates its ap-
proach by flashing and corr uscatiug
with fresh brilIiaucy. So decided are
it's effects that two astronomers, one
at London, the other at Oxford, and
neither knowing the experience of the
other, supposed that the dark glass of
their telescopes had been broken or
put out of range, SO strong was the
flash Of golden light upon the vision.
1t is predicted that before the end OF
next year this magnetic light will
have got near enough to us to make
it's immediate and actual influence up
ON the earth distinctly felt. 1t is AN
nounccd that in consequence we may
expect to see phenomena that have
never been seen or known before by
the human race. If any of our read
crs are, therefore. yet disposed to com
plain of the weather and the earth
auakes. let them remember that, by
This tima next year, they may haze
an entire new line Of experiences to
explain and endure, in comparison
with which the flful winter and
rough, rude autumn of to-day may
seem like June morning in paradise
and the earthquakes shock and light
ning's storm, Il placid rocking in the
cradle, with pleasant lullaby OI
thunder Buffalo Express.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
Brave John MnYnard.

John Maynard was known as a sturdy,
intelligent, and God-fearing pilot on Luke
Erie. tie had charge of steamer from
Detroit to Buffalo, one summer afternoon.
At that time the steamers seldom carried
boats.
Smoke was seen ascending from below,
and the captain called out
"Simpson, 20 down and see what that
smoke is"
Simpson came up with his face as pale
as ashes, and said:
Captain, the ships on fire!"
'Fire fire! fire ! tire!' instantly re-
spOnded in all directions.
All hands were called up. Buckets of
water were dashed upon the flames, but
in vain. There WAS large quantity of rOs-
in and tar on board, and it WAS useless to
try to save the ship. The passengers rush
ed forward and inquired ofthe pilot:
"Hnw far are we from land ?''
'.Seven miles"
Glow long before we reach it?"
"Three-quarters of an hour at our pres
ent rate of steam.'
ais there any danger?"
danger enough here-see the smoke
bursting out Go EoTt0ard, if you would
save your lives ~
Passengers ana crew, men, women ana
children, crowded TO the forward part OF
the ship. John Maynard stood at his post.
The flames burst forth in a sheet of tirei
clouds of smoke arose. The captain cried
out through his trumpet:
''JOhn Maynard"
GAY, ay, sir ~ responded the brave tar.
GLOW does she head ?"
"Southeast by east, sir"
"Heud her southeast, and run her on
shore"
Nearer, yet nearer, she approached the
shore.
Again the captain cried out: John May
nard -
The response came feebIy, "Ay, ay, STRIP
"Can you hold on five minutes longer
Johu?"
"By Gods help, will!
The old mans hair WAS sc0rchcd from
the scalp. One hand was disabled, and
his teeth were set, but he stood firm As d
rock. He beached the ship-every man
woman, and child were saved, as John
Maynard dropped overheard, and his spir'
it took its flight to God.
He sacrificed his life to save the lives o
others. Noble John Maynard! 1t is
worth greater effort to save soul from
moral ruin.-[J. B. Cough.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
FOOIishness of ofIntemperance.

The habit of liquor-drinking is, to
our mind, the most foolish, inexcusable
piece of destructive nonsense in the
world. And nowhere, is 1t more prev
alent than in cities. The money
poured down the threats of men each
year is greater than. the amount spent
for improvements. Whisky shops, sa-
looms, gin mills, beer cellars, wine
rooms, and all sorts Of irrigational de-
vices, and places to fool away money,
are found by the hundreds and thOus-
aDds in cities. If man is tired, he
drinks. If he is at work, he must
drink. If doing nothing, he must
have nip each hour. If too warm,
he takes mint julep. If too cold, a
hot whisky. Ifhe is by himself out
comes flask or bottle. Ifin company,
he stands treat till his money be gone;
then, like a dead beat, sits around till
some one asks him up.
A man on small salary steps into
a saloon, invites half dozen friends
to drink, pays half a dollar or more.
and walks out. Three or four times a
day he repeats this, and always drinks
when asked. 1t is social. Men mean
nothing by it. But during the week
halfa mans salary is poured down his
throat, destroying his stomach, weak
eniDg his nerves, Over-exciting his
brain, rObbing himself and family Of
money needed for other purposes.
But it is social! Drink in the morn
ing,-at nOOn,-at night and then
a few times between drinks. Then
the brain whirls,-the hand becomes
unsteady,-the pocket grows empty
the home ones sutfer,-4he eye looks
red and tremulOuS. As if ashamed,-
ambition is drowned or poisoned.
Pretty soon the poor fellow is unfit
for business. He makes mistakes.
He is sick, unable to work. He is not
the man to he relied on. He leaves his
place, and in time finds Il poorer one.
Then he feels blue,-driuks still more,
his family suffers,-he leaves his
place again. and at last dies wretch
But it is social!
we are sorry to see men toOllng
themselves away,-dying like weeds
in a gutter-when they might be men,
upright, healthy, loved, and useful;
of benefit to themselves and others.
And this is why we write against
intpmperance. Health is too precious
tn be wasted. Manhood is too no.
ble to be thrown into the gutter. Life
is too sweet to be- drugged with PUis-
ons now compounded and sold as IL
quOrs. To drink pOisOns may he social,
but it costs too much for US or for any
man of sense who loves himself or
others. Who of our readers dare think
of this matter, and act as their better
Judgment shall dictate 3?
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

The Cost OF the War.

Commissioners Wells, In his report
I presented to Congress, gives an es
innate of the cost of the war. The
government spent, ia war expenses
and expenses growing out Of the war
down to June 30, 1869, S4,I71, 1,9l3,498
This excludes whaF the administra.
ton would have cost had there been
no war, and may be called the net cosl
to the government of the rebellion.
To this, however, must be added a
number Of items, which Mr. Wells
gives thus:
Pensions, capitalized al eight
yeurs purchase. S20O, 900, 00O
Increase Of State debts, mainly
f. on war aCcOunt.................... 1876 600 600
County, city aud town indebt-
edness increased on account
OF the war ESTIMATED ......... 20e ,OOO, 900
Expenditures of States, coun-
ties, cities and towns, on ac-
count OF the war, not repre-
sented by funded debt (esti-
mated) 100000, 900
Estimated loss to the loyal
States from the diversion aud
suspension OF industry, and
the reduction of the Ameri-
can marine and carrying
200 600 600
Estimated direct expenditures
Of Ofproperty by the COnfeder-
ate States by reason of the
700 700 600
This makes a total of loss by the
war to the whole country of nine
thousand millions of dollars. "Tbis,
then" says Commissioner Wells, "was
the cost Of the destruction of slavery
the cost Of compromise-the cost ofthe
unfaithfulHess of those who founded
this nation to the idea by which the
nation lives. What does it measure?
1t is substantially a thousand millions
a year for nine years or, at the wageess
OF Eve hundred dollars year, the la
Dor of two mllliuns of men, exerted
continuously during the whole of that
period. 1t is FIVE times as much Rs
the slave property Of the country was
ever worth. 1t is a sum which at in-
terest would yield to the end of time
twice as much as the annual slave
prodact of the South in its best es-
tate"
We spent and wasted in the war
money enough to build ninety Darien
ship canals; or to build a hundred
Pacific Railroads; or nine times as
much as would double track every rail
road in the United States. ~.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
Advice to You~g Men,

A lady, who signs herself "a Martyr to
Late Hours" offers the following sensible
suggestions to young men:
Dear gentlemen, between the ages OF
''eighteen and fOrty-ive," listen to few
words of gratuitOus remarks. When you
make social call of an evening, on Il
young lady, 20 away at Il reasonable hour.
! Say YOU come at O'clock, an hour and n
half is certainly as long as the most fHs-
cinating of you in conversation can, or
rather ought, to desire to use his charms.
| Two hours, indeed, can be very pleasantly
spent with music, chess, or other games,
to lend variety but, kind sirs, 10y no
means stay longer. Make shorter calls
and come Oftener. a girl-that is "A sensi-
| bic, true-hearted girI-will enjoy it better,
and really value your acquaintance more.
just conceive the agony OF girl who, well
knowing the feelings ola father and moth
! er upon the subject, hears the clock strike
| ten, and vet must sit ON the edge of the
chair, in mortal terror lest papa should
put his oft-repeated threat in execution
! that Of coming down and inviting the gen
! tleman 10 breakfast! And we girls under
stand it all by experience, and know what
it is to dread the prOgnOstic of displeaSure.
| In such cases sigh of relief generally ac-
companies the closing of the door behind
the gallant, and one don't get over the
| feeling of trouble till safe in the arms OF
! Morpheus. Even then, sometimes the
dreams are troubled with some phantom
of an angry father and distressed (for ali
parriesl mother; and all because "A young
man will make longer call than he
ought to.
! Now, young gentlemen friends, I'll tell
you what we girls will do. For and hour
and a half we will be most irresistibly
charming and fascinating; then, beware,
mOnosyllable responses will be all you
need expect. And if, when the limits
shall have been passed, a startling query
shall be heard coming down stairs "ISn'l
it time to close up?" you must consider il
a righteous punishment, and, taking your
hat, meekly depart-a sadder, and, it is to
| be hoped, Il wiser man. Do not get angry;
but the next time you come, he careful to
/ keep within bounds. We want to rise
1 early these pleasant mornings, and improve
the "shining hours :" but when forced tC
be up AT such unreasonable hours at night
exhausted nature will speak, and, as 4
natural consequence, with the utmost
speed in dressing, we can barely get down
to breakfast in time to escape Teprimand
from papa, who don't believe in beaux-as
though he never vas yOuug-and a mild
reprOvinE glance from mamma, who un.
derstAnds n little better her poor daughters
feelings, but still must disapprove out.
} wardly, to keep up appearances. AND
now, young men, think about these things
and 6On't-tOr PHYS sake, dOn't-thrOU
down your paper with a "pshaw =" but re-
member the safe side of ten.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
COnnndrums.

What animal, tree, and domestic article always
in the second persou' Tae eve, the yew, and the
CcH-tent.
What reuuneraoHs doss distance receive Or lending
enchlntineut 10 the view
When mn,t Time hang up his S,ytbe! When he
sha he mower.
Why is sheet Of postage stamps like distant rela-
tiOnsY Because they are bat slightly connected.
Why Is a bsId-headsd man ike angel' Because
be usaFs 'ahiaing crown"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
IOnuenee or HaPpy ChlIdhood.

SAACO OA AAaFpy CHILDHOOD
The memory Of early happiness Is a
treasure house of sweet comforts and
consultations. In pure, simple, earnest
joys become wells-to draw from when
ever we sit down in thirst and weari-
ness by the highway of life. OF this
one good the world can never defraud
US. The sunshine in those DAYS reaches
across our little stretch of life, and
mingles its rays with those that beam
from the heaven Of cur hope. The
actual present Of the adult life, and the
materials which enter into it. are made,
up, more than We generally suppose,
OF remlniscenCe.- We ruminate like
the kiue. We lay up in the recepta-
cles Of memory abundance of undigest-,
ed material, that we recall and abprO-
pirate to our refreshment and nOurish-
ment; and this process Of reniniseencs
of living over again--grOws upon
US as We grow into years, till at last il c
becomes our all. Exhausted power
has no resource but to dwell upon its
old play and its old achievements.
How sad is he who can never go hack
to his childhood without a shuddert I
who can never recall a period when
his life was filed with sweet and sim.
pie satisfaction!
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

THE BIG HoG.-The "big hog'r Of
the State has been found at last. An
exchange says Robert BgvingtOn, Of
Knox township, Holmes county, has
a hog three years old, weighing twelve
hundred pounds; it is nine feet long,
six feet four inches around the heart
and four feet in height.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

John G. SAKE, at q hotelin the West,
undertook to carve a piece Of beef
which was so tough that the carving
knife made little impression upon It.
The poet laid down the knife and fork,
glanced around and spoke: "Gentle-
men, said be, "that's an infringe
ment on Goodyear's patent"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
DIFFERENTIATION

Let not soft Slumber close my eyes, o..
Ere ] have recnlleCted thrice
The train Of actions through the day.
Wherr have my feet marked out their WayH
What have l learnt where'er I've been,
From all I've heard, from all I've seen
What know more that's wOr the knowing
What have done that's worth the dUingl
What have [ sought that should shuul
What duties have left uhdVns1
Or Into what new follies rgni
These sslC-inquiries are the road
That lead to wisdom and to God
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

About four miles west of ChilIieoths
Ohio, there recently lived a sick and
deerepit widow and four children.
No one knew in what manner they
were provided with necessaries of lie,
until it was discovered, by chance,
that when the neighbOrs' hogs We're
fed, the children went out and fed
with them After this discovery they
were provided for by some humane
neigh bOrs.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

"Charlie, my dear, won't you have
some beans?'
mo" was the iIl-mannered reply Of
the petUlant chprub.
Mop exclaimed the astOnished mo-
ther. "NO whal?"
mo beans," said the chill.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

Young lady Ito Fred with thin legs)-
"Fred, always admired your courage;
knew when 1 first laid my eyes on you
that you were brave to ri,sbness."
Fred looming up smiling)-'Oh DON'T my
dear. Why do you say thai ?"
Young lady-"Why, any man has cour-
age who can trust himself long at time
Oh such legs as yOurs.''
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

A lady was asked to join one of tho
divisions Of the Daughters Of Temper
ance. She replied: This is unnec-
essary, as it is my intention to join
one Of the Sons in the course of few
weeks"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

Mr.. B, did you say or did you
not say what I said you said? ? be-
cause c. said you said you never
did say what 1 said you said. Now
if you did say that you did not say
what said you said then what did
you say?
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

The editor of an Iowa paper called
on his Chinese Washerman and tried
to coax him into taking h III Of his
under garments. The rcjoinder Of
John was: "Printee man dirty; shirt
was like ID; no get eleanee ;lserubee
skin of hands; inkee de ID to eleah
OFF No want Washee for printee
chargee two dollar dozen; cuss' en-"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

A cement, made by dissolving rub
Der cut fine in benzjne, may be used
to mend rubber boots aud shoes. This
cement will firmly tNsten on rubber
patch.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

Old DR.. A. was quack, and very
ignorant one. On one occasion he was
called by mistake to attend a council Of
physicians in "a critical case. After con-
siderable discussion, the opinion was ex-
pressed by one that the patient was con-
valesceut. When it came TO DR.. As
turn to speak, "COnyalescent ~ said he.
"why, that's nothing serious l have cured
convalescence in twenTy-fOur hours !"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

"What does the minister say to our
new cemetery?" asked Mr.. Hines.
"de don't like it at all; he says he
won't be buried there as long as he
lives" "Well," said Hines, elf the
Lord spares my life, will"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

A noted Western Express Company
prints on its shipping receipts that it
will not be liable for "aHy loss or
damage by fire, the acts Of God, or Of
Indians, or other. enemies of the Gov
erument."
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

A neighboring editor has been pre-
sented with neck tic and box of COL
lars; he will wear them as soon as he
can raise a shirt.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30
Riddle.


! ] an composed of four letters.
/ am one oT the most useful, we'll the most de-
strurtive things in this world.
! Bphrad me and I wrath it-et.
/ Head me aud rut my tail of. aud [ am tree.
/ Wv ] is one Of the must important words In the
! English language.
] lyV-s..
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

How the gOverness said grace: For
what are we going to receive-el-
bows, elbows the Lord make US
backs in and shoulders down-truly
thankful-and no chattering-amen"' -
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

BEr. Peabody, twenty-five years
ago, offered his hand, heart and for
tune to an American lady then visit
ing London. They were accepted
Subsequently Mr. Peabody learned
that tie lady was already engaged ,
when she accepted the new suitOr,
and rebuking her lack Of sincerity, he
summarily broke the contract.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

They have a town in Colorado nam
ed PurgatOry. The name is perhaps
hint to travellers that they may ego
further and fare worse"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

The New York papers tell Us "mOn-
ey is close" There must be some
mistake about it. We have seldom
known the time when It was SO lar
of
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

Josh Billings says, life IL Iik noun
tin-after climbing up one side, and
sliding down the other, we put up the
sled.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

. Perhaps it is an old but it certainly
is felicitOus saying of Josh Billings,
that "one hornet who feels well will
break up q large camp-meeting.'
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

If love is blind, how can there be
love at first sight.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

wourd q man walk any farther in walking arnund
field whose ends 20 rods long and sides rods long
than he would in walking around field whose size
and ends are 40 rods each? Il. NJ.
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

"DonI be so boisterOus, little girl, y
said a mother to her daughter. 81
am not boisterous, mamma; Pm girl
sterous,"
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

Conceited party-"Aw, 1 say, must
I, aw, take ticket for puppy?"
Ticket clerk (meditatively)-'No
you can travel us an ordinary passen-
rer."
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

An Alabama editor, in putting a gro
Gerry kept by a woman, says: "Her
tomatoes arc as red as her own nose
her indigo as blue as her own eyes,
her pepper as hotus her own temper. "
The Highland weekly news. [volume] (Hillsborough [Hillsboro], Highland County, Ohio) 1853-1886, 1869-12-30

The fortune George Peabody left is
estimated atS7O, 100000.