The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1869-10-14
What a Little Boy Thought About
Things.


What a Little Boy Thought About
Things.
am little boy about SO many years
old /; l don't know whether I'm a good
little boy, but | IN afraid not, for | some
times do wicked things, and once | cut
sisters kittens tail off with the chopping
knife, and told her dog came along and
bit it off, and swallowed it down before
Kitty could say Jack Robinson, and sister
said she was sorry, and it must have been
naughty dog; but mother did not believe
me, and said she was afraid | had told a
lie, and I'm afraid | had. So then she
asked me if knew where liars went to and
said yes-that they went to New \ ork and
wrote tor newspapers she said no-but
lake of fire and brimstoEe, and she asked
me If L would like to GO there and | said
no, tor l didn't think there would be much
skating or sliding on the lake, and
the boys couldn't snowfall either on
shore, and she said it was more than that,
just as tho that wasn't bad enough, for [
den t think they can play base ball neither
| Then she asked if wouldn't ike to be an
angel and have harp, and said no, I'd
rather be a stage driver and have big
drum, for | couldn't play on t'other thing
SO L should not like to be an angel, for
their wings must be in the way when they
go swimming and play tag and leap frog,
and besides it must be hari to fly when one
amt accustomed to it. But it would be
jolly to be stage driver, and have great
long whip and touch up the leaders, and
say-"g lang there, what are you doin on!
! Should like that much bettern n fyin :;
and then mother said there was dreadful
stage OF sin, and Bob hollered and said that
he guessed | was on it, and then she whip
ped us and sent us TO bed without any sup
per, but didn't care for any supper, for
they hadn't nothin' but bread and butter
and tea, and Bob and got up, and he lift
ed me In at the pantry window, and we got
mince pie and whole hat full of dough
nuts WASH fried enough, and sometimes |
do swear, for | said by golly the othe. day,
and sister heard me, and she told mother,
and mother said | was bad boy and would
| bring her gray hairs in sorrow to the grave
and she whipped me, but l didn't think it
did her gray hairs any good, and It hurt
IN :, and when L got up stairs L said goft
| darn it, but | said it SO she din't hear me,
and when she asked noe if did not think |
was very wicked, | said | was afraid | was,
aud said | was sorry for it and wouldn't do
SO any more, and then she said | was q
good little boy, and tod me about George
Washington, who cut down the apple tree,
and was caught at it, and said he did it
" it'll his little Ratchet, just as though |
hadn't heard all about it before, and did
always think he was a big stupid for cut
ting wood when they had hired man about
the house and dulling his little Ratchet, and
besides it would have been a great deal
jollier to let the apple tree be so as he
could have stole apples off in the fall. |
didn't care if he was the father Of his coun
try, he wasn't smart, and | bet you the
boys In our school would cheat him out of
his eye teeth shopping jack knives, and |
could lick him and hardly try, and [ don t
think he was very healthy either. for |
never saw good boy that wasn't sick and
had the mumps and measles and the scar
let fever and wasn't coughing all the
time, and hadn't to take castor oil, and
could not eat cherries, and didn't have to
have his head patted till his hair was rub
bed off, by everybody that came to his
mother and be asked how old be was, and
who died to save sinners, and What he d
been studying at school, and how far he
got, and lots of other conundrums, and
have to say his catechism no, shoulan I
like to be good little boy. | just as lie
be an angel and be done with it. | don
think | ever shall be good little boy. and
other pc eple don't think so too for | wash
never called good little boy but once, and
that was when my uncle John asked me
where l stood in my class and / told hinl
next to the head, and he said that was
right and he gave me quarter, and wher
he asked how many boys there was in the
class and said there were only two, myself
and a little girl and then he wanted me tc
give him back his quarter, and | wouldn't
and he ran after me and stumbled over a
chair, and he broke his cane, and hurt him
self, and he's been lame ever since, and
I'm glad of it, for he isn't my father, and
hasn' airy right to lick me, for get enough
of that at home, and The quarter wasn't a
GOOD one either. don't like uncle join
and | guess he knows it, tor he says | an
not like any Of the family, and he says he
expects LII go to sea and be pirate, in
stead of a respectable member of society,
and should not wonder, for L d rather be
pirate than a soap boiler like him.
don t care if he is RIGHTS nasty bust