Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1869-06-08
NUMBER xxx.

tQe IleV. LIZ. IOQQ, OF fICtSH6lQ, puDllSleQ Dl
the American Tract Society, will no doubt b,
read by young ministers and also by member
of vacant churches. av 75- VI j-lG
'Thriftyville wants minister They arr
looking far and near to find one but they wan
the right man. Thriftyville is not one of your
old, effete places. 1t is place grown up quick
ly on Rapid river, in the beautiful valley OF
Eureka. 1t is very important place, stand
ing directly over the centre of the earth, so that
if a hole were dug, and stone dropped into it,
it would pass through the very centre of this
great world. 1t has growing population, and
boasts of a circle of ve,y intelligent people. =
Moreover, 1t seems to be the centre of a great
moral influence, and it now wants minister
second to none. They want to get the society
out of debt, to repair the old wastes which time
has already made in their halfbuilt sanctuary,
to gather in the young, to draw full house,
and to make the concern every way prosperous
and respectable, and easy to support.
Now for the qualifications desired. They
are SO few and simple that the right man pro-
badly stands at your elbow
Item. He must be man mature iu intel
lect, and ripe in experience, and yet so young
that all the young people will rush after him.
'Ltem He must be quick, ardent, flashing,
nervous in temperament, so that he may kindle
quick and burn bright, prompt, ready, and wide
awake and yet a man consummate prudence,
whose nerves shall never be unstrung, nor out of
tune. -.-.f ~
Item. He must be man of great, burning
zeal, so that he can startle, arouse, and kindle,
and move the congregation and yet so cautious,
so cool, that he is always safe, calm, self pos
sessed, unperturbed.
Item. He must have the power to awaken
and arouse the church and yet, let them be
quiet and look on while he does all that is done
for Christ.
Item. He must urge and move men, and
lead the whole people to salvation and get them
all into the church and yet be so iudicous
that he can makea difference between the chaff
and the wheat, and let none but real converts
into the fold.
Item. He must be strong and original in
the pulpit, and bring none but beaten oil there
and yet be at leisure to receive any call, any
Interruption, be prepared for every occasion,
aud like the town pump, never sucking for
water or giving out dry.
Item. He must be workman who shall
go down deep into the mines of truth, and
quarry out its pillars, and set them up, and
make men come and wrestle around them and
yet, the most gifted man in light conversation,
and on all that floats In the everyday world
around him.
Item. He must have health, SO that his
body never wearles, his nerves never quiver, a
real specimen of muscular Christianity and yet,
hard, severe thinker, close reasoner, and a
most dlligent student, getting his books from
any quarter.
Item. He must be poor in this worlds
goods, to show that money is not his object, so
that he can sympathize with the poor, and can't
help feeling humble and dependent and yet
his family must be the most hosptable, and
entertain more company than any other in town;
his children should be second to none in education
and training; they must be respectfully dressed;
he must give away more, and more cheerfuly,
than any man In the place, not even excepting
Esquire Rich himself, and his family must all
be models, in all respects, for the community.
Item. He must be man who can be per-
manent though vastly superior to DIR. Solid of
the next town, who has been with his flock over
thirty years and his congregation must hear
the same voice, on the same subject, several
times every week; aud yet he must come every
time as original as fresh, as glowing as if it
were done but once year.
Item. He must be able to live in a glass;
house, always acting in public coming in con-
tact with all sorts of men and of prejudices, so
original that all will respect and after fear him.
and yet never odd eccentric, morose, repulsive,
or awing in manners. He should have the
the gentleness, and softness of the little child
Item. He must be always ready, lofty, key
ed up to do the best possible; and yet so calm
in spirit, In word and look, that nothing can
disturb the repOse.
Item. He must never preach so that the
people are not proud of him when they have q
stranger in their pew, or SO that the echo of his
sermon shall not come back when he goes a.
broad; and yet every sermon must be SO beauti-
full, that all the young people will admire it and
wonder over it, and the little child can carry it
hop and II 10 i
Item. His wife must be model of all
models. She must be young and handsome,
but not lndlscreet or vain She must be wor-
thy the admiration of all the people, and yet
be really the humblest of all. She must watch,
and discipline, and prune, and lead, and make
her husband the embodiment of all excellence,
but she must never be aware of her power, lest
she become overbearing. She must be the
model of lady, have fair face and white
hands, though compelled to do all the work of
her family. She must be ready to meet every
body with smile, take her hands from the
flour at any moment wear checked apron, and
still be dressed like lady, Her face must
never be otherwise than cheerful, her head
must do its achings in secret, and she must give
none occasion to call her extravagant, or to call
her mean. She must be able to alter the same
dress four times, turning it thrice, and fitting
it to smaller child each time She will be ex-
pected to be the very life of the great Dorcas
Society, the most jealous member of the ALL
Labor Society, the very backbone of the Ma
ternal Association, the warm leader in the
Female Prayer meeting, the head and mover
in the Reading Circle, and the visitor general
of the poor. She will be expected to be at the
prayer-meetings, and let how many soever
| brethren be present, she will be looked to set
the tune for each hymn. AS she receives no
salary, of course her other qualifications are not
so important, though the abore are essential.
Item. The minister must be sound in doc
| trine, able to lay his hands on the foundations
of truth, to fortify and defend the hill of Zion ;
and yet must never preach the old fashioned
doctrines. They are not spicy They are not
taking They will never draw full house.
Item. 1t is rather desirable that he should
be pious man, and one who loves his Master
and yet, as this article, piety, has not acquired
great value in Thriftyville, it would be we'll for
| him not to make that too obtrusiye.
Such, in few words, is the man they want
| for Thriftyville If they can light on him, they
will pay .fUe hundred dollars annually and not
| let it run behind unreasonably. This is not, to
be sure, half what their clerks receive, but they
think that the minister, if he be only the right
man, can manage to live on it. Who is
ready?
IN. BAH applicants must put an extra
postage-stamp in the letter, or will receive no
attention.
PREsBYTERIANs-Th Presbyterian Church
in numbers stands among the great churches of
the world. 1t is estimated that there are three
and-a-h half millions in Great Britain, principal
ly in Scotland and Ireland; two millions in
Holland one-and-a-half million in France
one-and-a-half million in Protestant Switzer.
land, and two millions in Australia and Russia.