Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1869-07-14


ne man who wrote ollome, Swoet
mover hai hnnie hfVhange
No. of course not an hls folks %
home cay he didn't Nobody who
writes about anything ever has lt lil
man Ia out of anything he imiaedi.
ntelv roee aud writes aoont a. No
one writes No many "headings "a the
man who IL out Of his head.
Certainly he didn't have any home.
The man who wrote "Old Arm
Chair nevor had an arm chair in all
his life. The best he had was nm old
split bottom chair without any back
20 it.
The author Of ''Takc me back TO
Switzerland never was IN Switzer-
land. Tho nearest he ever came TO u
was sitting in the W Tell saloon eat.
ing Switzer kase-kdse why, that was
the best he could do.
"Mother I've come home TO Die
hasn't spoken to the old woman for
wears, and wouldn't go near the house.
Besldes. he is one Of that class Of spirit
ualists who don't believe they will
override. His health was never better.
His mother is nothing but mother
in-law, and she is dead, anyhow.
There is the author Of "Old Oaken
Bucket; there wasn't q bucket on
the whole farm, water being drawn
with a pail aud a cistern pole.
eff | had but a thousand year"
stated privately TO his friends that he
would.be perfectly contented with half
that sum, as he was doing chores Just
for his board and three months school
ing in the winter.
The authorof "Champagne Charley"
never drank anything but ten cent
whiskey. N
The man who wrote "Mary bad
little lamb knew very well it was
nothing but little lamb fry.
"Shells of Ocean" is humbug. The
plaintive poet who represents himself
as wandering, one summers eve, with
sea-beat thought, on apensive shore,
was raised in the interior of Pennsyl-
vania, and never was ten miles away
from home In all bis life. "Gathered
She'll" did heY All the shells he ever
gathered were somi eggs shells back
Of his mothers kitchen.
clark, j hear the angels singing
spent all his evenings in concert
beer saloon Angels, indeed
mlo r,ar xrko xurofo tho aGosaor cf
the Shirt" hadn't shirt to his back,
wearing a wammus for tho most part
"Oft in the Silly Night" used TO get
on spree and make the night howl
till day break.
The author of "We met by chance"
knew very we'll it was arranged before
hand. He had been weeks in contri.
wing it,--and she admired bis contri-
vance. rr lef
The author OF II know bank, y &C.,
didn't know one where he could get
his note discounted. Tho only check
he ever held was white check on a
faro bank. Henever had red check
in all his life.
"What are the wild waves saying"
knew very well they were reproach-
ing him for running away from Long
Branch without paying his hotel bill
"Who will care for mother now n
Who indeed You took the old wom-
an to the poor house just before writ
ing the song, and there is nobody but
the poor-master 10 care for her now
"Hear me Norma" was deaf and
dumb. Ae couldn't make his pa hear
nor ma. a .a
any mother dear" used to thrash
the old woman within an inch OF her
life.
The author Of "Rain on the roof al
ways slept out doors.
HLet me kiss him for his mother"
got mad because his mother wouldn't
have him, and whipped her little boy
within an inch of his life.
al dreampt | dwelt in marble halls, f"
used TO cheat at marbles when a boy,
and his dream was horrid nightmare,
brought on by remorse al the recollec-
tion of fraudulent marble hduls. ia
-srm saddest when | sing,y--was
tickled almost to death when invited
TO. eItaar
"Happy by the dreams sold ben
zine whiskey- You can fancy what
lind Of dreams were produced.
"No one to love-" having just killed
his fifth wife, naturally fel. like the
devil.-Cinn. Times.