The native Virginian. [volume] (Orange Court House, Va.) 1867-187?, 1869-09-03
THE AG0NIEs OF AN ANGLER-FIsHING
ING WITHOUT SENTIMENT,
BY JOHN QUILL.

This thing of going fishing and call
ing it sport is ridiculous. Old Isaac
Walton was a deceiver, and his &c ON
plete Angler" is calculated to .pervert
public morals, and lead the unsuspect-
ing astray. In my opinion it's an over
rated book, and ought to be suppressed.
1t encourages the idea that fishing is o.
genteel pastime, which affords time for
meditation, and cultivates a love for the
beautiful in nature.
That is all nonsense every ifiat1
knows who ever went a fishing in his
life. l leave it to the sufferers # it
isn't
Don't you know that you go out and
nearly bursts-a blood vessel digging
worms for bait. and then you have to
dig hole as big as a rfe-pit before
you can lay your hands on one solitary
worm.
Then when you get to the water you
very likely sit down on some black ber-
ry bush or other, and undergo nearly
as much physical suffering as you do
when you stick the fish hook into your
cutlcle when you are going to put the
bait on.
When you once throw IN you begin to
watch the cork, and you look at it hour
after hour, until you nearly 90 blind,
and you see about twenty corks, and as
it never budges ole inch all the time,
you conclude that there amt any fist
about, until you pull up, when you find
that some we'll balanced and insidious
member of the finny trile has sucked
all your bait off.
After enough patient endurance to
start eight or nine Christian martyrs in
life, you get nibble. Yes, the cork
moves slightly, and you think you are
at last going to get a fish.
You watch it closely, while your mind
runs over the big fish you have heard of,
You think of Jonah, OF whaling voyages,
and of the surgeons you have seen a.
round on the waves.
Perhaps this is one of the large size
and you wonder if you hadn't better go
home and get dray to fetch it.
Suppose you were TO catch the sea
serpent or thousand pound snapper?
and invdluntarily suggest soup to your
self, while all the time the cork keeps
bobbling up and down, until at last she
gives one jerk and goes under. Got
him, by George Pull up, and there is
a wretched little fish on the hook that
wouldn't satisfy the appetite OF a sick
sardine, and he cost you Just fourteen
worms enough to bait school of
mackerel.
Throw IN again, wait for an hour, and
you don't get single nibble.
Then you think you are safe to let go
and light your pipe. No sooner do you
get The match lit, and you can't throw
it down because it's the last one you've
got, than you get splendid bite; the
nia ~ n es
you have a chance to pick up the rod
and the fish gets off.
Any man who says this isn't aggra-
vating ought to die; lie isn't fit to asso-
ciate with ordinary human beings.
But you try to encourage yourself by
saying that while there's life there's
hope, and that perseveran ,e and pa
Ilence overcome all things, and by get
,ing off a lot moro of old second class
falsehood, and throw in again.
wait for several centuries, if you call
'ulate according to your suffe erings, and
never get ar.y bites but one in the calf |
u your leg from sixty-legged spider, |
who has been on an exploring expedi- |
ion up your pantaloons.
Ihen you pun out and spit upon Che |
'ait for luck; may be you blow on it, if
Tou are superstitious, and sou throw in
nc get bite. You pull up several
hundred times and never catch him,
Ihen you get mad; you believe it is
N eel, and you swear TO eaten that eel
II die. You feel that life will be per-
ect!y joyless and destitute of happiness
lnless you get chance to put your grip
N that eel.
At last you hooked him and drew out.
lie is active and playful and vivacious.
lie is wriggler, and combines himself
nto letters s and G and X, and runs
Trough the alphabet generally, and
tares you in the face, and gets around
our legs, and covers you all over with
lime.
Then he taagles your line into hard
mot, and When you get your foot on
Inn you find he has swallowed the hook.
nd Just as likely as not you've cot to
Up that eel clear open from head to tail
0 get 1t out, and wien you do he will
Vriiggle away from you and annoy you
S long as you stay there.
Eels never die; immortality is their
trong point, and they lay themselves
ut to make you abjectly miserable.
when you get all Strengthened out
nd throw in again, YOU wait for an
our bus y,otf only get about one first
lass bttt 9tiil8H that time. You pull
p alfG 9ttt nafe an enormous fish. and
etore' yta get Him near the shore he
,uickly lets go his hold and drops back
gain into ms native element.
1t is rough on you attyrit. bue whom
-OlI on n fiShirirF y,oh So, araf 4 = - :. =