The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1869-10-23
CHIPS.

AS frisbmau was asked 70 deGns Il
Irish bull, to which he replied: :. Whon-
ever you see two cows lying down ia :
field, the one staudiug up IS lAe bail"
: yo42s .a3y wlo Tas -e1as43 tsg
mother for kissing her intended sael
the act By quoting the passage iFh=s-
soeyer yc would that men should u uzto
you, DO yea even 50 - t,ss4 "
A Washington dispatch says sae 4-
ministrat:on has decided - a53udoa the
whole Cuban matter, and throw the ea-
tire business over 10 CoBgress II tae next
session.
"What makes you crum. Tcn1 - oh,
| lave had to endure sad trial 10 my
feelings" "What on earth w.s -
''Why, l had to tie % a pretty gals bea-
net while her ma was looking on
A strong-minded woman in Now YORK
was heard TO remark the other day tI.at
she would marry u man who had plenty
of money, though he vas 50 Ugly she lad
to scream every tine she looked :. him.
Sammy, run to the store aud e.
some sugar" "Excuse nc, n.a: In
somewhat indisposcd this nporniae.
Send father, aud tcll hir = bf.9
per of tobacco along
Jehial Slab remarks. tha: zaat u ss
owl, Sumner the peacock, cFraaGe tha
guinea hen, Ben Bnt,er the lyens. s a.
den Phillips The wolf, ,Coiiax tue
jesse Grant tho kangaroo, and Fcraey
the ass of the nation. The Ions aud
eagles are all dead.
Ma, has Aunt Jane got bees in her
mouth % ''No, my son, why do you ask
Isuch question :" because, / heard
Mr.. Brown tell her that he would take
the honey from her lips, and be was 50
.ong about it that | wonder that he did
not get stung."
Two dutchmea sat quietly fishing on
the bank Of river recently, when ths
following conversation took place in ~
gard to the luck they were havius =:
Does nothing pite you, Hans" 4eisb.
noting ut all" well, reg..e3 .
dutch, "notiug pites me 100.
"Why. Charles" said Eank q
colored preacher, "you cant ever al
who made the monkey" Oh, ssa
massa w swell, who made tbs aaukeg
'sWhy, massa, dc same one made lie mon.
key dat made you
| While an ignorant lecturer was doscrib-
ling the nature of gas, a biue-stocking Ia
dy inquired of gentleman near her what
was the difference between oxygin and
hydrogen? "Yery little, madam" I" said
he. .By oxyain, we mean pure Sin, and
by hydrogen, gin and water"
! The San Francisco Balletia says that
Annie Cora Mowatt Ritchie is given t,
extravagant flights of fancy in her letter.
to another San Francisco paper l
which the Detroit Tffbane replies that i
such fault exists, the Bulletin must no
forget that Ritchies have wings.
The following bill was presented 70
payment to local Board Of Supervisor
lin Iowa ssMadisou county to Joai
) Jones, DR.. To making the wedding toi
Deborah Dent, aud getting her married
and clearing the county of any fnrtha,
charge on her account, aud placing he
on good moral and religious ioundatloa
IS10."
An inquisitivc urchin the ether s'ay
! while reciting lesson (says al ese
|, from sermon on the mount beoae ogf
+ Ma, did Jesus get S2,o00 g IS
/ preaching!"
! No, my child, he Ill not ses aas
: thing"
aWhy didn't they pay him p
stBecause He refused to preach pelisici
g The devil offered Him good salary
do it but be would not accept the esl