Dallas herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1849-1873, 1869-05-08

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''.'" ~''"l ''"'' VIZ" 'N , 10 -,
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iV' SUN ,ssN'"s No's"" 20 y"
!re,s np IN n'oo"'ers lna laG , =, .
MSh "a. aHi - s''u". ","s !"
si"m ON .hmt hsn,e
"hr' "IA'hs a,
Ito struggling aroaha he
'hor"nshinres OF 'h,s town, looking
l'"o a" o'u os"r o''sk prSppeu ul'"h
lIr i'sS, anh showing those ans'r,
"h'ch are ;" 'h''n 'na' gu ou" ''.',
s'' ohe ol them through INC el""'
.W -.
"W'lk'nS' u scratch A.,
wen, Sl',"'u 'hlhh NOT , Ana'
BESIDES, ! d"h /. know Whereabouts
IN ms terrestrial gi"ue you eNP0y'
I" nni ANY Nnoois s'rons onons. ,
1" Dear 20" i'" " Sn,asn In., "
'ast iron oar'w"eols ln.o s",'"v
rooms lho m'nu's 20" s'I Nv" Ill.,. -"
ihom, you Wou'"' no "va' '"'S
sou can DO u '" WALK, anu on u ,n'
sronnu' 700, Where 'no er"H' ", w.
.aful''sh ,h'h OF o'so s'' '" no"'
Ci u hre ana melt uo"" your "o'
dhpois'
Mr "i,hihs your P'''0'''
Hc'lndaionS' -,
"but IN not going 70 Putn WI"
Y. l don l 'niend't 10 nave you h1P'
ping aronn'b Town on u voi1I'pouo'
a'd very ,.koly 'a,',hg . o., anu ,. o' : w,
vt doctors coming TO my mouse ana
making posi- mo1em eSn examinations,
and saving yon up. ana discovering
. tins with hard Latin names W your
inhgs ana your h'Sr, M" YOU,
physique genera,'y; wen, snou.u
'hink mott us Dad enough 70 n"No
10 submit 10 you now, without nav
ing your gore spit around over Tue
carpet, and barrc' OF sawo1he :,
b!asphoming Mt your anatomy. =
civilians, amt yon ashamed 10
talk sou
81 want you to undcrsiand Una,
If you ride that 'vclccipcde l WIN
sue for n divorce. l don't be'ieve
ia woman exercising her muscles
on any such contrivance. ron q
u g 'od deal better get a scruoo,ng
hr sh and go down and tackle the
. tr mt door steps with some sand ana
"A chunk of soap. That's tho kIna
ofcxcrciso you want, in myoplnion.
MIR. Wilkins, ifyoull only listen
p"
,'''"Or else practice carrying a coal
tcut'le up and down STAIRS every
five minutes all day. But as Tor the
. mother of II family, and flabby ola
'igirlIof your years undertaking 10
ride u volocipcde, why, it's simply
rijiculous."
a. Mr.. wilkins, /
of, ''fhc next thing l know, L sup.
7poso' you will be parading yourself
in the papers as Madame WI ikins,
the Champion Velocipedist, and
running mile heats on the Nicholson
pavement for hundred dollar purses;
best two out of thrcc. A beautiful
" spectacle won't il be? And then
suppose you will want me to bot on
Non and back You up; but not ono
cent of my cash do you get. MOI
single, solitary rcd. DO you sup
pose Iara' going to throw away my
money on sucR q frantic as you
We'll, | should think not. ! would
not put up a dollar on you If was
worth untold Dillions. IN ho'
proud Of you'll want you to distinct
j. understand that. 'y... ~ :,
"Mr. wilkins, thatsal nonsense
"And n pretty example you are
sitting to your children. Here only
yesterday, Holfernes Montgomery
T. inado velocipede out Of two flour
barrels, and'when he and Bucepalus
Alexander tried to mountit, II Droke
y down and hit Mary Jane on the leg
and 1ained her for life, while liol-
fcrnes Montgomery fell over the cat,
which yowled and epittod around
! and scratched lIolfernes Montgom.
trry over the frontispiece, SO that
lis beauty, Is destroyed forever, and
.Ahc looks moro like you than ever:
| say it is perfectly outrageous, and
=, I'm not going to stand it."