The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1869-05-08


sHov did you come p Wasry II. Aafshc4
Ssnn;s Marshall Wasn't l.nny saxt Sat
had called her 30 for years, for che Wa the kind
,st and truest friend had ever haa. Che 81
silent Uniting busily and sniling ntsls before
%: a. .n 81 cane & shaking csu siosh. Aaa,
Mamie. What, did you trip him up iP JIG tpl3I
ana aN H IN tell YOU. When I .wss,{our year,
old NV mother died. q ds6N innw whsshe,
children Of that teader ageremember their moth.
or "A remembered mine ornst but when was
mslnttle that eat IN high chair ut the table,
would watch the chairs filing up around it with
the persistent hope that my mother would come
to sit by me; and 4 aid not rslinanisH fhis hope
after / was old enoush~to comprehend death.
but chung to it, praying Christ to work a Mira
Gle. as in the old Bible times, and let my dear
mother appear to my longing sight. '.a ;.
stNever was there more directorate or imagi.
native child, and my. youth was dreary time.
NV grandmother, who had charge of me, meant
70 do her duty BY he, and in the usual aecspt-
ance Of the term, she did it. j, was fed and
clothed, and she Taught me as well as her imi-
ted means would allow. But she never mani
tested any affection for me. She was one of those
kind Of people who think kisses and csresses
foolishness, and though loan look back now and
remember proofs of a secret tenderness, abe new.
or kissed or yarcssed me when I was child.
81 grew up starved for love. After was four
teen years old grow to look for it from whence
all GIRLS look for it-fsom a lover.f read 70.
rnances, I built air castles-yet 80 we'll had
been trained in practical ways and habits that NO
one dreamed of the turn my mind was taking.
Nv fondest dream was of the time when mar
tial figure, with bold, bright eyes, and gay apr
parel should, seated milk-white charger,
appear before me asI spun in tAe porch, or gath.
cred berries in the field, and folding me to his
heart with tender and assuring words, leap upon
his steed, and with me in his arms, fly to some
unknown country where he would make me
queen Of his castle. ! never realized, ugly: ig..
norant child that was, that this was peculiarly
absurd as applied to me, until one day something
occurred which destroyed my beautiful illusion,
and made me wrctched
"There was always several weeks in the fall,
when, if the crops were good, was almost in.
cessantly employed in gathering berries which
my grandmother preserved for winters use. My
only companion In this work was my cousin,
Stephen, boy two or three years younger than
myself.
zone day when thus employed weyesught .
glimpse Of q man in regimentals, riding swiftly
through the woods.
"
"Oh!" said l, in delight, 'perhaps it is my
lover knight coming from the wars to find me.
Let us watch until he comes around the bend of
the road. II it is he he will take off his plumed
hat and wave il for me. Then he will geliop up
and lift me to his horse and carry me TO Moated
Castle" rs ss-i "a. 4 ts, A., A, So,,s. sf,sA
"A nice girl you are, for knight TO run of
with, amt you? A handsome lady love you'd
make, with your black facs and flying hair like
wild Indians and mouth all stained up with
berries! Ho, no! Wouldnt you look grand
flying away on . horse, with your old calico
dress flying, and your shoes falling off, cause
thy're 30 big ia Just like to see your Vsr
ss1fy cioud-land was destroyed forever. From
that moment I knew that ] was ugly, unoouth
and unattractive. and my hero lover never came
ceased to expect him. ts ~ss3 esHe'
81 grew older, I was pale, plain, awkwardly
shy. felt my personal defects to painful de-
gree, and Stunned what society was attainablc
to me.
"When was eighteen years old received IN
invitation from an aunt who lived in Boston to
visit her. had not seen her, and she knew me
only by report She wished me to come and
spend the winter with her. iv ~ s@dS .es sfag. ~
my grandmother was willing that I should
go, but we were very poor, and it required q
great deal Of economy and management to fur
nish me with q wardrobe fit TO visit the CITY
with. At last my outfit was completed, ,howev.
er, and went to Boston. re,s.'1 ~ VA lS w
1.-THE family of my Aunt Caroline consisted Of
herself, her daugter Julia and the orphan child
OF a deceased son. Julia was Just nay ssge, aud
very pretty. 1t L. very hard thing to MY, but
honestly think that my aunt-to whom my per.
sonAl appearance had been described, wanted M
to associate with Julia % . foil to her beauty
and to reside in the family that might assist Il
taking care Of the children. At Any rats, wher
lcama, the single servant VA dismiased.
'sfhe family lived elegantly, but I scocn found
that it was done by the strictest economy. III
aunt worked hard and managed well. and NO on,
outside OF the house dreamed that their incom,
was az painfully small as il was z s'gA s'' 4
"Julia had q lover. Mr.. Marshall was YER,
handsome and mighty fine, and I do not won1e,
that he appeared very like, q god TO me then. III
was but recently acquainted with Julia when j
went there, but he appeared very much in, Low
with her. used to help her dress upon the eve
ntngs On which he came, and after abe had gon
dow8, looking like an angel, used 10 shsd sfey
quiet tears Of sorrow and lonsliueaAl 81 I stoo.
and listened to their happy chat aud gay laugh
ter ringing from the room below. was yer,
sure that I never could be pretty, and i Enough
nobody would ever love me- lQWoee tflaS ~
g."One day Mr. Marshall came 10 dine. Extr
attention was given to the house and dinner. M
aunt had been very wealthy for 4 short tim
when frat married, and from her husbands fail
ure she had saved few things which, eeya Cd
house an air CT means and style-some article
Of fine table silver and some handsome oil pain,
ings, I remember. sf VIZ 's' , ,,.
with my assistance, she served the Dime
herself, and managed to b richly dressed TO q
pear at the table. She looked cool and stately
l, who had fingered until the last moment in Il
kitchen, making gravies and serving up yeget'