The New Orleans crescent. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1866-1869, 1869-04-18

.
don't you like punchi hope am not q coward.
but trembled, and said did. And 30 did like
1t. / like to have killed myself on It. Ugh
ugh II ughll! Ihayn't got the recollection out
Of my mouth yet. And she why, it didn't faze
her. But she limited afterwards that was dis.
sipated wretch, and we broke il off, We broke
it of. mind you. 1t was entirely voluntary thing
on my part, want you to understand. She said her
wsrd was pledged and she would not recede from
it che would fulfill the bond to the uttermost letter;
the contract should be kept and the pound of flesh
should be delivered; but-she added, with that
sweet smile so characteristic d her gentle ma.
ture-Mr Pennifesther, have aword more. And
then she went on to say that would wish 1 was
dead before three weeks passed over our connu-
| bal heads; that she would do her level beat to
make life miserable for me, andth she believed
| mirth and thought I'd better rot. Oh. punch
| punch how many crimes have been committed
| in thy name as Mrs Roland once remarked to
l the goddess of liberty.
| Next after Scotch whisky cones Bourbon. This
is French whisky, though 1t is low manufactured
a'so in Kentucky. 1t was formerly of greatrepute
| in France. History makes prominent mention OF
1 q constable OF Bourbon who was In rank and
| power only second to the throye. Later we fad
record of one Louis Bourbon. who was even
higher than the throne, having been over
thrown by his subjects sbort A. d. l7s9 1t is
| supposed that the coanetdbb, or constable, was
originally either the kings cup bearer or else that
| he was chief gauger indeed the chronicles more
4 than once speak Of his having been engaged, but
| it ia believed IN his engagements 1t was claret
| rather than whisky that few. However, traces of
| the custom may he observed even at this day ia
1 remote districts, where Bourbon, and especially
when it gets Louis Tor loose. still has good deal
| to do with the constable.
| Finally, there are o multitude OF minor brands,
such sc Old Robertson County-or old any other
| county; only be sure to put the old in: Young
Robertson County, for instance, would mt go down
| at all. Then there are Double Rectifed, Rifed,
| Copper Distilled, Kill Gzzard, Pine.top, Bust
| head. ge.foot, and many others perhaps but
| whose names not being so delicatey euphonious,
and so suitable for falling upon thspublic ear.
| "Like petals from blown roses on the grass"
| here omit. If dollar is incosed with each in
| quiry, further inquiries will be received-witn
/ pleasure.
None Of them though could stand up to Louisi-
| ana rum in times. 1t could carry farther, hit
harder, make drunk come quicker, give you q
| verse headache next morning. with less capacity
| for breakfas. and more soufelt yesrning after
soda cocktails, than any brand that ever branded
| since cogDac was first manufactured out Of high
| wines and Pruesc acid.
| And now little advice as to the use Of whisky.
You must take bottle of whisky with you when
| you start on journey. This rule is inyariable,
| especially if yen go horseback.
| On such occasions ever the mildest Of men find
II necessary. 1t don't at all matter that you may
| never touch II at other times. Have out the sad
| dle-bsgs; get your bottle-a fat one Is best;
fill it; cork it tight; stuff it away. 1t looks work
| manlike-aDd then think of snake-bites. Take
| care not TO let more than FIVE miles pass without
| looking mysterious and asking your companion IL
| he wont "try little OF that!' (He probably
will.) Just here any small joke will come in very
| well. Something expressive OF your disgust for
water, say; or something calculated to imply that
| you principally live on whieky-when at home !;
and that the only objection you have to rain is its
| watery oharscter-or that water is very gooe for
navigation: or-indeed anything-so it's original
| and very funny.
| lyon have DO companion. why OF course all Of
n - -
your bottle in your saddle-bsgs, without disturb
ing yourself TO break In on your every day habits.
And now to my young friends in the city.
| Though am at present habitant Of the forest, .
! communer with nature in her widest moods,
| though / now dwell in Jxnpt., / have not always
1 been so reserved. / have known the whirls of
| dissipation, and have even come in contact with
/ the vortex of excitement. So hearken to me,
| youth of New Orleans
When you are invited to "have something" a.
| Hsw kirs's-snd you are uery young, that isl
would suggest that you ''hsve 1t straight" and
pay no attention to the tumbler Of ice-water the
barkeeper puts out with the liquor; this viii give
| you the appearance Of being accustomed to the
thing. and is almost equivalent to side.whiskers.
| When you are the inviting party, on no account
ever forget yourself so far "a to AJAX how much it
| is. Put down a bill for something more than you
suppose it to be- and IL it should chance not to be
| enough the man will let you know it.
1t is even better though to nod at him and say
| uncoDcerneoy, "This is NINE" OF course you
/
at least know your face; any demur would evil
| IDENTIFY be awkward.
And always, my young friend look solemn
| when you drink. ltis, in fact, rather sn awful
netting which may be the final means OF your
| utter destruction act as BELTS the occasion
and look solemn. Besides it's the correct thing TO
| do and nobody but an irredeemsble greenhorn.
| perfect "altimar, DIM joskin wears his couu-
teDsnce otherwise than in melancholy at such fes-
| tive seasons. II you doubt what say, 60 to the
| next cofeeLouse and remark the jewellers.
! Yes, whisky is curse to the old-Fve heard
| 'em often, and some of these old fellows are per-
feet rippers-it is blasting simeon and remorse
less, conscience stricken constructor to the more
| youthful. 1t makes the widow and the orphan to
mourn, and the strong man IL robs of his stI ength
and causes to fall in the gutter quite frequently.
| But Il is not on these grounds that object to
| whisky. No, Mr.. Editor, for never was Q widow
| nor an orphan, at least / never was female
| orphan, nor was / ever very strong man; and
besides, we don't have any guttersn our metropo.
lis to fall into even if wss-except to the houses,
and nobody would be fool enough to climb up on
| top of house Just TO fall IN the gutter when he
could every bit ss easily go out and lie in the mid
die of the street; that is, don't think he would,
unless he hat Call regular beasty, and that's
| what never get, thank the Lord
No, Mr.. Editor, the reason don't Ike whisky is
simply because amt fond of it. Humiiating as
| the confession is, make it.. don't like whisky,
that's the truth. As have already insinuated let
| truth be spoken whatever the condolences. Fiat
| justaid, sudt coesun. This means when justice
| Is done the sky will cave in.)
Looking for approval 10 that more estimsble
portion of creation called the fair sex, / say
adieu. know they don't drink for my duck told
| me so-the one liked punch for, you recol.
\ lect-snd, not drinking, these besuteous sers-
| phim (anges is too hsckneyed aud cbey1tb con-
veys the idea of bib) these besuteous sersphim,
then. not drinking themselves, are peculiarly ca.
1 psbie of understanding one who does. At least
all the married ones think they are Therefore, !
! say, 90 look to them for condemnation!
| Men may call me ninDy, or even saphead. They
| are as the idle wind, which regard not. have
never he'd much regard for wind since got the
| pDeumonis sitting in dreught.
No, my dear Cress., so long as have one beau.
tiful and accomplished German harp and use OF
instrument extrs), so long ss have one OF these
to place her delicate digits upon my broad and
intellectual Though somewhat bald headed) fore.
head, exclaiming, as she does It, Well done good
ard faithful PenBifesther so long, most worthy
Cress., am / ready at q moments notice, to an
nounce, in the glowing accidents OF Ophelia:
| II fall into q river then drowHded shall bel
Tears on the string band.)
Your sometimes silent but still ssgacious,