The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1869-06-19
[From the Cincinnati Times.1
DECEIT or SONG WRITER'S.

1
The man who wrote Home, Sweet
Home" never had a home EccLnu1e.
No, Of course not All his folks at
home say lie didn't. Nobody who writes
about anything ever had. If a man il
out OF anything he Immediately goes and
writes about it. No one writes so mauv
''headiugs" as the man who is out of his
head.
Certainly he didn't ever have any
home. The man who wrote "Old Arm
Chair" never had an arm chair in his
life. The best he had was an old spIint.
bottom chair without any back to It.
! he author Of ''1akc Me Back to Swift.
zerland," never was in Switzerland. The
nearest he ever came to it was sitting in
the VIM. Tell saloon eating Switzerkasc
-hase why, that was the best he could do.
Mother, I've Come Home to Die.''
hasn't spoken TO the old woman for yearg,
and wouldn't 20 near the house. Besides.
he is one Of that class Of individuals who
don't believe they ever will die. IIig
health was never better. lis mother i
nothing but tnolher.in. law, aud she i
dead anyhow.
There Ia the author Of sold Wooden
Bucket" too; there wasn't bucket on
The whole farm, water being drawn with
tin pail and cistern pole.
"if had bus thousand year" eta
ted privately 10 his friends hat he would
bo perfectly content with half that sum.
rs he was doing chores just for bis board
and three mouths schooling in tie wia-
| ter.
The author Of " Cham payne Charley y
ncTer drank anything but leu-cent whis.
key.
The man who wrote 'afary had Little
Lamb knew very well it was nothing
but n iifie lomJ G.g.
Shells Of the Ocean" Is hufabug.
The plainiivc poet who represents him
self as wandering, one summers eve, with
sea-hcat thought, on peusivc shore, was
raaicd IN the interior Of Pennsylvania.
and never vas Ten E,ilcs away from home
in all his life. "Gathered shells" did
he All the shells he ever gathered were
lsome egg.shells back Of his mothers
i kitchen.
iIark, Hear tie Angel Singing .
spent all his evenings in concert beer
saloon. Angels, indeed
The man who wrote the "Song Of the
Shirt" hadn't shirt TO his back, wearing
wampum for the most part
"Oft in the Silly Night" used to get
on spree and make the Silly night howl
ill daybreak.
The author of We met by chance
knew very well it was arranged before
hand. lie had been weeks in contriring
it-and she admired his coutrivanee.
The author Of " know bank. etc.
didn't know one where he could get his
note discounted. The only cheek lie ever
held was white check In a faro bank.
lie never had red check In all his life.
What arc the wild waves saying p
knew seEsxelI- sli.r-;yA--sycre regroaching
him for running away from Long Branch
without paying his hotel bill.
Who will care for mother now?"
Who, indeed You took the old woman
to the poor house just before writing the
song, and there is no one but the poor
master to care for her now.
Hear me, Norma" was deaf and
dumb. lie couldn't. make his pa hear,
nor ma.
Ny Mother dear" used TO thrash the
old woman within an inch of her lifc
Let me kiss him for his mother" got
mad because his mother wouldn't
have him, and whipped her little boy
within an inch of his life.
Il dreamt / dwelt in marble halls, +"
used to cheat at marbles when gboy, and
his dream was horrid nightmare, brought
on by renlorse at the recollections of fraud
ulent marble hdaks
Tam saddcst when L sing" was
tickled almost to death if invited to-