The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1869-02-03

JOHN SHRIMP's COMPOSITION ON AhUsE-
MENTs.-There are various kinds Of amuse-
ments. Some people think it amusing to
pull dogs tails. l tried it once with big
| bull dog, but found it was not so amusing
as l thought / never tried it again. Ma
has many amusements; one Of 'em used to
be whipping me with slipper; but Pm too
big for that now. It's good to be big boy
for some reasons, only don't think that be-
cause Pm big, should have to carry all the
groceries home instead of Pa. Sometimes
think Pa is getting lazy; but | never tell
him so, for Pas got habit of doing as he
pleases spite of me, and says he don't want
any impudence. think when l get big I'll
have just such habit Everybody says
take after Pa wonderfully.
Aunt Jerusha says my chief amusement is
tormenting Others But don't think so,
for though do like TO plague folks, like
the circus good deal better o, dear me !
how do like the circus. | tell you now, I'd
go to the circus every night, and 10 the two
matinees if could. l once knew boy who
had free pass and could 90 whenever he
pleased fd rather be him than be an angel.
/ suppose will be an angel some time. All
good folks get to be angels by and by, and
have plenty of feathers. / wish had some
of 'em now, for my beds awful hard.
If could have my choice, I'd like to be
the clown in the circus-hol when l think
of it, I'd rather be the man in the middle of
the ring, who snaps the whip. l tried it
once at recess in school; whipped the little
boys on the legs with long switch, but they
didn't seem to like it and cried, and had TO
stop. Some boys can never take a joke.
Then, l don't know but what I'd like to ride
on horse like Nino Eddie. No l think
after all, I'd like the flying trapeze better.
tried it once at home-when Ma left me to
take care of the baby-with a clorhes-line
fastened to the top of the bookcase But it
didn't work good. Somehow fell, right on
the baby, too, and such squallingl But
never did know baby that gets in the way
so much as our baby does. Don't ii know
how to cry, thought How Ma can call it o
precious, sOoty-ncoty pooty cherub of lamb
fcan't see. Lamb, indeed I'd like to lamm
it. l believe the baby knows better than to
act as IT does. Aunt Jerusha says / ought
to ask no better amusement than tending to
that sweet creature. Sweet, he'll Why it's
the heaviest creature that ever was born. 1t
weighs a thousand pounds at least. II you
had TO carry it around the room when it's
teething you'd think so, too. It's been II
teething and crying and a growing heavier
ever since it was born. That's what Aunt
Jerusha calls amusement
| know O boy who's been to Humpty
Dumpty, and he shows me how Fox looks,
and makes faces that would scare ghost
into conniption fits. There was man once
who promised to take me to Humpty Dumpty,
but he never did. / suppose be forgot it.
Men always do forget just when you want
em to remember, but they are plaguey sure
to remember what you'd rather have 'em
forget. If that man was a boy a little bit
hitler than l am, I'd make him remember.
There are many other kinds of amusements
besides tormenting Others, and the circus,
and the baby, and .Humpty Dumpty. There
is skating and baseball, and going to the
lectures. / went to the lecture once with
Ma, and thought it was the sleepiest amuse-
ment ever had in my life I'd rather mind
the baby. Baseball is very good, except
when you get hit on the nose Ny nose was
once swelled up as big as a cucumber in this
amusement. It's all right now.
Good by. Yours truly.
P. S.-Dear Sir,
JSo. GEORGE WASHINGTON SHRIMP
IN Z. Commonwealth.