The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1869-10-22
The Hornet,
ny JOSH. KILLINGS.

The hornet Is an inilamibcl bugger,
sudden IN his impreshuns and hasty in his
conclusions, or end.
His natral disposishcn Is q warm cross
between red pepper In the pod and fusil
oil, and hiz moral bias liz, "git out NV mi
way" ..r.. r...,.. .t..........-- .-.r.,. =
they have long black boldly. divided
in the middle by waist spot, but their
phisikal importance lays Mt the terminus
of their suburb, in the shape Of javelin.
This jayelin Is alwuz loaded, and stands
rcddy to unload ut q minnit's warnin, and
enters man NJ still NJ thought, NJ spry
M litening. and az full ov melancholy rs
the toothake.
Hornets never nrgy case they settle
aul NV their differences nv opinyan by let
ting their javelin fly, and arc as scrtin to
hit rs u mule Is. ' -
This testy kritter lives In congregations
numbering about 100 souls. but whether
they arc male or female, or conservative,
or matched In bonds of wedlock or wheth-
or they are mormons, and good many Of
them king together and keep one husband
to save expense, l don't know, nor ! don't
care.
never have examined their habits
much. never konsidered II healthy.
Hornets bid their nests wherever they
take noshun to, and seldom are disturb
ed, for what would 1t profit a man to kill
90 hornets and hav the Tooth one hit him
with his javelinp
They bid their nests av paper, without
emmy windows to them or back doors.
Thoy have but one place of admisshun,
and the nest liz the shape of IN Oyergrown
pineapple and Is cut up into just as many
bed rooms rs there is hornets.
1t Is very simple to make hornets
nest If you kan, but will wager emmy
man dollars he can't bid one that he
could sell to hornet for half price.
Hornets are M bizzy rs their second
couzzins. the bee, but what they arc about
the Lord only knows; they don't lay up
emmy honey, nor any money; they seem
tn be bizzy only jist for the sake NV work
ing all the time.
! suppose this oncasy world would
grind around on It's axle-tree onst In "a
hours, even If tharc want emmy hornets,
but hornets must be good for something,
but don't think now what II Is.
Tharo haint been bug made yet In
vain, nor one that want n good job; there
liz ever lots ov human men loailng round
blacksmith shops and cider mills all over
the country, that don't seem to be ncces-
sary for cnnything but to beg plug tobac-
co and swear and steal water melons, but
WI let the cholera break out once, and
then VII will see the wisdom Of having
jist sich men laying around; they help
count.
Next tn the cockroach who stands tew
tho head, the hornet has got more waste
stummuk In reference to the rest oy his
boldly, than any ov the insck populashun,
and here is another mystery; what on
airth duz hornet want 50 much reserve
corps forP
Ihav jist thought-to carry htz javelin
In; thus va SEQ the more we diskover
about things the more We are apt to know.
II Is always q good purchase to pay out
our last surviving dollar for wizdom. and
wizdom Is like the mysterious hens egg;
II aint laid In yurc hand, but liz laid away
under the barn, and yu hay got to sarch
for II. r.
The hornet Is nnsoshall skamp; he Is
more naughty than he Is proud; he liz o
thoroughbred bug. but his breeding and
refinement has made him like sum other
folk kno ov, dissatisfied with himself and
every boldly else; too much good breed
ing ackts this way sometimes.
Hornets are long.livcd-I kant state
list how long their lives are. but kno
from instinkt and obscrvashun that emmy
krittcr be he bug or be he devil. who Is
mad all the time, and stings every good
chance he kan git, generally outlives all
his nabers.
The only good way to git Mt the exact
fighting weight of the hornet is tn touch
him, Let him hit yu once with his jayelin
and you will be willing to testify in court
that somebody run onc.tined pitchfork
into yer; and rs for grit. ! will state for
tho informashun ov those who haven't
had chance tow lay In their vermin wis
dom az freely NJ hav. that one single |
hornet who feels well, viii break up q
large camp meeting.
What the hornets do for amusement Is |
another question | kant answer, but sum
ov the best read and heaviest thinkers
among the naturalists say they have tar
get excursions. and heave their javelins |
ut mark; but don't imbibs this asscr-
shun raw, for never knu emmy body 80
bitter Mt heart rs the hornets are, to waste |
q blow.
Thare Is ono thing that q hornet dug
that will give him credit for on mi books
he alwuz attends to his own Dizziness,
and wont allow emmy body else To attend
to II, and what he duz Is always good
Job; you never see them altering emmy