The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1869-11-26
How Mike Rode The Bull.

ming, ana he had just got his clethes
OFF, when he saw Deacon Smiths bull
making at him. The bull was a vic
ious animal, and had come near killing
TWO or three persons, consequently
Mike felt rather 'Jubus." He didn't
want TO call for help, for he was naked,
and the nearest place from whence as.
sistance could arrive, was the meeting
mouse, which was at the time filed with
worshippers, among them was the "gal
Mike was paying his devours to-" So
ne lodged the bull, as the animal came
at him, and managed to catch him by
the tail. He was dragged round till
nearly dead, and when he thought he
could hold no longer, he made up his
MIND he had better holler. And now
we Will let him tell his own story:
80, looking at the matter in all its
bearings, l cum to the conclusion that
ia better let some one know whar
was. so l gin yell, louder than a
locomotive whistle, and it warn't long
before seed the deacon's two dogs a
coming down like as ifthey war seeing
which could get thar first. 1 know'd
who they were arter-they'd jine the
bull ag'in me. 'So,' sez !, 'old brindle,
as ridin' is rs cheap us walkin' on this
route; If you've no objections, I'll take
deck passage on that ar back o.
yourn.' So 1 warn't very long Citing
astride Of him. Then, if you'd been
thar, you'd have sworn thar warn't
nothin human in that ar mi.r the sile
flew so orfully, as the critter and l roll
ed round the field-one dog on one side
and one on the other, trying to clinch
my feet. l prayed and cussed, and cuss-
ed and prayed, until / couldn't tell
which did at last-and neither warn't
Of no use, they were so orfully mixed
up.
"Well, reckon rid about half an
hour that way, when old brindle
thought it was time to stop to take In a
supply of wind and cool off a little. So
when we got round to tree that stood
thar, he naturally halted, s. sez ! old
boy,you'll lose one pa ssenger sartin. So
Jist clum up branch, kalkerlating to
roost till l starv afore I'd be rid around
that ar way any longer. war max
in tracks for the top of the tree, when
heard sumthin' maxim an orful
buzzin' overhead. kinder looked up
and If thar wasn't-well thar's no use a
swearin'-but it war the biggest hor.
nets nest ever built. You'll gin in,
now l reckon, Mike, cause thar is no
he Up for you.' But an idea struck me
then that stood heap better chance
q ridin the bnll that whar was. Sez /
old fellow, if you'll hold on I'll ride to
the next station anyhow, let that bt
whar it will.
$50 jist dropped aboard him again
and looked aloft to see what had gain
ed by changin' quarters, and, gentle
men, Pm liar ifthar warn't nigh hal
a bushel Of the stingin' varmints ready
to pitch into me when the word 'go'
Was gin. Well, reckin they got it,
for all hands started for our company
Some on EN- hit the dogs-about quart
struck me, and the rest charged on brin.
die.
"This time the dogs led off fust, dead
bent for the old deacon's, and as soon
as old brindle and / could get under
way we followed, and as l was only a
deck passenger, had nothin' to do
with steerin' the craft; if had, we
shouldn't have run that channel any
how. But as l said before, the dogs
took the lead-brindle and next, and
the hornets dre'kly arter. The dogs
yellin'-brindle hollerin', and the hor-
nets buzzin' and stingin.'
"Well, we had got about two hun.
dred yards from the house, and the
deacon heard us, and cum out. seed
hi M hold up his hand, and turn white.
l reckon he was prayin' then for he
didn't expect to be called for SO soon,
and 1t warn't long neither afore the
whole congregation-men, women and
children-cu cum out, and then all hands
| went to yollin." None of 'em had the
fust notion that brindle and l belonged
to this world. i just turned my
head and passed the whole congrega-
ton. seed the run would be up soon,
for brindle couldn't turn an inch from a
fence that stood dead ahead. Well we
reached that fence, and / went ashore
| over the old critters head, landing on
the other side. and lay there stunned.
1T warn't long afore some of them
as was not scared, cum runnin' TO see
| whar war; for all hands kalkerlated
that the bull and l belonged together.
But when brindle walked off by him
self, they seed how it war, and one OF
EN- said:
mike Finck has the scrummage once
In his life!'
"Gentlemen, from that day | drop.
ped the courting bizness, and never
spoke to gal since, and when my hunt
Is up upon this yearth, there won't be
any more Fincks, and its all owin' to
Deacon Smiths brindle bull"
SOMETHING TO BE THANKFUL For.
On one occasion Mr.. Charles Dickens
was upholding the theory that what.
ever trials or difficulties might stand in
a mans path, there is always something
to be thankful for. ''Let me, in proof
thereof" said Dickens. "relale a story.
Two men were to hang at Newgate for
murder. The morning arrived; the
hour approached the bell of st. Sep
ulchre's began to toll; the convicts
were pinioned; the procession was
formed; it advanced to the fatal beam
the ropes were adjusted around the poor
mems necks; thtr were thousands OF
| motley Siuht -saarl nf both enxo.