Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1869-07-09
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

WHAT is a husbands promise about
giving up tobacco apt to end IN? In
smoke. st a..
By strange coincidence, peace itself is,
after all, tne greatest army contractor In
the world.
A NEW YORK paper laments the COM
pletion Of the Pacific Railway, because 1t
will facilitate the importation OF fire.
crackers. 81 G g. -
az GO through my work" as the needle
said to the idle boy. But not till you
are hard pushed" said the idle boy to the
A PAuPER recently left a Massachu-
sets alms-house because she could not
have sirloin steak and green tea served at
midnight tsaesisA .'-s. bass 9s- t-saa Z
A yoUNesTER in Quebec tried to crawl
down the chimney and surprise the family
by emerging from the fireplace, but got
wedged in at the bend of the fiue, and had
to be dug out with picks. r
THE philadelphia Post says "the report
that Madame Parepa. Rosa's voice 30
filed the Boston Coliseum that the audi
ence had to go out to make room for it, is
incorrect"
THE Louisville Courier Journal makes
men have recently died in Boston and left
no legacles to Harvard University. 1t is
supposed Harvard will try to break the
wills. .ss..>rtstb
A LADY in San Francisco was thus ad-
dressed by her female cook, not long ago ::
care you going to use your horses this
EVENING"" Yes, am; why?" "Oh,
pshaw!" responded the cook, Il meant to
have gone out with them myself"
THE WAY OF THE WORLD
Determined beforehand we gravely pretend
TO ask the opinions and thoughts OF friend;
Should his differ from ours onany pretense, eas
We pity his want of both Judgment and sense
But If he falls into and fatters our plan,
Why, really we think him sensible man.
LITTLE four-year-oId Masie had long
been vainly endeavoring to pucker his
mouth into shape for the whistling of
national tune he had heard upon the
streets At last, in despair, he went TO his
mother, exclaiming: /" Ma, Use so little |
can't make hole big enough for Yankee
Doolum to dit outl" : i
t"WHEN young lady is very frivolous"
said gentleman with Pecksniflan air
of speaking in general terms, and meaning
some one In particular, "Ipay very little
attention to what she says. Her remarks
pass in at one ear and out at the other"
"That isupon the principle that things
pass readily through a vacuum," rejoined
the lady. .,.a.s.s ..ass-a
THE following intoxicating toast was
offered by Mr.. Stearns, at festival given
to the National Division of the Sons of
Temperance, at Washington: q" Woman
More beautiful than flowers, more deli
cious than strawberries and cream; the
purest spirit of the age, she is far more
intoxicating than.wine; we love her, and
she cannot help herself
"A BARRIsTER noted for his absence of
mind was once witnessing the representa-
ton of Macbeth, and on the witoh's reply
ing to the Thames inquiry, that they were
"doing deed without name" catching
the sound of the words, he started up, ex-
claiming, to the establishment of the audi
ence, "a deed without namel Why it's
not worth sixpence." t.s
MORE than five thousand pounds of
sour milk curd were used in Chicago last
year. as combining agent for colors, by
the manufacturers of dyes. By the use Of
acids the curd is transformed into an ad-
hesive substance which is combining
agent for different colors. Without it,
they could not be printed on cotton or
wooden tissues, to remain perfectly fast
thereafter. @'' b" 't '''
AMONG the I&ughable incidents of the
recent election. riots in Paris, was the case
Ola ,pickpocket. caught watch in hand. A
crowd seized the culprit and would have
handed him over to the police as robber,
but the thief, as he was being carried
along, raised lusty cry of "Vive la Re-
publique !" The consequence was that he
was torn by the police from his captors,
and will probably get a weeks instead OF
years Imprisonment s,-ssF, .z.rf rrer,.-
DURING the late session of the Massa-
chusetts Legislature there were 466 acts
and l03 resolves passed, and allGof them
were approved by the Governor The
pay roll of the Senate amounts to $34, $50,
and that Of the House $205, $50, being at
the rate of So per day. This does not in
clude any OF the officers but those presid-
ing over the two branches, and the entire
amount to be paid officers and members
will be over quarter Of million of dol
lars.
THE population of Great Britain on
June 1, 1869, according to the estimates
of the Registrar General, amounts to 3D.
Ol5,234 souls, or, excluding the army, the
navy and merchant service, and reckoning
only the persons in the United Kingdom,
3h621 .431-namely, 81 1853 GOT In England
and Wales, 8, 205, 481 in Scotland, and g.
046 343 in Ireland. This is an increase of
$40 GA as compared with the numbers in
the United Kingdom in the middle Of the
year 1o6S-namely, an increase Of $780,
go IN England, 1853 in Scotland, and g.
050 in Ireland. a4i WAH IN Z 6
In general order issued November Is,
1852, President Lincoln commanded thai
Sunday labor in the army and navy be
reduced TO the measure of strict necessity.
The discipline and character of the Ma
tional forces should not suffer, nor the
cause they defend be imperiled, by the
PROCLAMATION of the day or Name of the
Most High" Attorney General Bates, of
the Cabinet, wrote: "The laws of the
land made for its account ought to be as
strictly enforced as the laws for the pro-
lection of personal property. If the
Sunday laws be neglected or despised,
the laws OF person and property will
soon share their fate, and be equally dis
regarded" f'il 41'-l q ..ilF s'
A FEW days ago horse in Thornbury
Township. Chester County, Pa, was
seized with hydrophobia The animal
had been confined in q field, but by some
means got out of the Enclosure into the
public road 1t attacked team that was
engaged In hauling stone to the railroad.
Inc driver OF the team succeeded in driv-
ing off the mad animal, and it Is not be.
lieved that it injured either of the horses
attached to the team. When the fit was
off, the poor brute would become yery
weak -stagger, and fall. When the
spasms returned, 1T would again rise and
attack everything in its way Several
yOerapue wpra nhoSod On ~ Tho faror,