Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1869-06-11
sUNDBY YANKEES WANTED FOR
NEW INVENTIONS.

Gen, Comfy. of the Columbus Jour
nal, has been on his travels and got as
far as GAINESVILLE. He describes part OF
his adventure in the following racy
paragraphs:
It's a little surprising that, with all
our Yankee shreWdness, we should
nave no more comfortable way of dis
posing of travellers on railways at pres
cut. 1t is a simple lottery whether one
has a pleasant journey Oris boz ed within
an inch of his life. You go abroad, aud
every individual person becomes your
natural enemy, 10 prevent you from es-
tabIishin2 yourself upon the space
ne has preeInpt5d- They all look at the
window and affect not to see you, while
you search through the car for a seat
all except the exhausted young female
who occupies four seats. This injured
pei son looks up n your face with an
expression of hopeless agony because
there is no possible streIcn by which
she can occupy SIX. She seems to say
TO yOu with her appealing eyes You
see how il is sir; l am the idol idle, II
should be Spelled ) of q large and select
home circle. I have admirers who
would fight 1or me and gladly die tor
me. 1 have riches too great TO count,
aud high ancestral hOme-but in this
horrid vulgar bus ness of travelling /
am only the crushed occupant of 1Our
seals in a railway car-PostIively nOtn-
ing more this" OF course unless you
want her TO die on the spot, you wIllnot
dare 10 think that you may encrOach
upon This sacred grief TO the extent OF
{ limited portion Of one of those four
-eats. You 20 further, and you find b
seat. An Gag r person tells you To ''sei
down, 'and you lind yourself bound and
helpless ia the hands of the man WHIT
Ii wants Tn rnnvv VzyhaFhar Unu ssre.
sure this is the train for Blank when
will it start =? what time does ii gil
here VIII it stop at POdunk long
enough for him TO see his cousin Sallie?
what time does It git to P0dunk
whats his place we are AT now how
far is it from Blank 10 Podunk? how
many hours does 1t take to run it? how
many mites an hour is that? will We be
-ure TO make the connection? where do
we get dinner? pretty good edtin'
mouse what do they mean by gavin
as tht Sc string of tIckets-ShOHld III think
they would do it all i'll one ticker? where
ioes the train connect for PhiladeIphy?
| is this the tram that cOnuects? what time
does it connect, 2 s'posIr' it don't con-
meet, where will we have to- stay? DIO
you ever git robbed on a train? what
| 10 they cbaTge on the 5lee pin car ? is
| the sleepIn' car sHfe2 is IL pleasant?
| pretty hOt, amt it? --s
With such conversation u ulan may
be reduced to Il state of luuaey inside
/ of a hundred miles. Yet our system
.ffers no way of escape. Then there j.
| 40 definite amount of room which he
| longs to you. You pay as much as the
young lady who occupies four seats; yeI
| YOU are not sure Of the half Of one seat.
/ For exam pie, last night I shared my
/ -eAL win Il young man in charge uf two
/ female travellers, and As "a conseq
ne sat the whole way with ValisH and
/ "a h., HtrfrE
/ You may hink you can ride mfort-
bly, Oh raj way Car "a row
/ gauge road, with IA young IN an e rry-
| ing VaIIse and three baud-OOxes be-
tween his legs, but il can't be done. 1
| tried It last ght, in every conceivable
position, and the net result was dis
| appointment, IN every case. Tf you
nave your choice of sents, never take
one with a young man carrying a va
lIse aud three bandbOXes between his
| legs.
The young female In front persisted
in kee r,lns the window open, though Il
hlled tue car with smoke aud her big
uee ly ears with cIndsrs. The car was
one of of the splendid ventiIatiDg cars
of Baltimore and Ohio, but the young
person had her notions about the ne
cessity of keeping "winders2 open.-
She ordered "John" to open my win
dow also, but it is a very d .fficult thing
tor one to open window, with Valise
and three bandbOXes between his legs.
Now the tuing for some Yankee TO do
is to invent a way in which each travel
er can take such a room" as he is able
to pay for, on train, and have 1t for
MS own during the iuurney--to open
its windows, TO carry band boxes, 10
s6aud up orIo lie down in, to bes0litary
or "sociable' in, as he chooses. Au q
then-W WANTED-a Yankte who will in
vent tram that will carry it's Iocomo-
tive behind it, so all the smoke will go
rearWHId.