Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1869-06-25
VOL IV.".""NO. 81
sollum Thoughts.
by JOSH BILLINGS.

Hope il a hen that lays moro eggs than she
kan hatch out.
Better leave your child virtcw than,money;
but this IL a sckret known only tcw. a few.
L honestly bclcavc it IL better tew know
nothing than tew know what amt so.
About the hardest work a phcllow kan do
IL tcw spark two gals at once, and preserve
a good average.
Prudcry IL Que of virtcw's bastards.
a nickname will o%utliyc emmy man or
thing; it IL like the crook in a dogg's tailc-
you may cut il oph and throw it behind tho
barn, but the crook IL tharc yet, and tho stump
IL the cpitaph.
1t you analize what most men call plczzuro,
you will find it composed ov one part hum.
bugg and two parts pain.
When you hain't got nothing to do, do it
at once; thiz IL the way to be bizzy.
We have been told that the best way tow
ovcrkom misfortunes IL tew fight with them
l hay tried both ways, and Recommend a sue.
ccssful dodge.
The art ov becoming ov importance in tho
eyes of others IL not to ovcr-ratc oursclf, but
tcw cause them tcw do it.
The tue way to understand the judgments
OF Heaven is to submit to them.
Method IL everything, espeshily tow ordi-
nary men the few who kan lift q tun at
pleasure hav q divine right to take holt oy it
tcw a disadvantage.
The mind ov mar liz like a piece ov land
that, tew be useful, must be MANFRED with
learning, ploughcd with energy, sown with
virtcw, and harvested with economy. 4,
WHARF religion IL a trade morality il a mer-
chandize.
Conversashun should be enlivencd with wit.
not composed ov it.
The less n man knows the more ho will
guess at and guessing IL nothing moro 4aSN
suspicion. go
Going tcw law IL like skinning q new milch
COW for the hide, and giving tho meat to tho
lawyers.
Death, tcw most ov us, IL q kind of "fare.
well bcncft"-"positivcly our last appear.
ance."
Phools arc quite often like ~hornets-very
bizzy, but about what the Lord only knows.
Living on hope IL like living on wind ; a
good way tew git phull, but a poor way tew
phatt.
Jealusly don't pay-ths best it can do,ia
tew discover what we dor't .ant to find, nor
don't expect to.
Sekrets are a mortgage ON friendships.
l don't think a bad man IL az a weak one.
l don't think q bile that has come tew a he'd
IL az risky az q hidden one, that may come to
a dozen heds.
A vivid imaginashun il like sum glasses
makes things at a distance look twice az big
az they am, and oluss to twice az small az they
am.
Hope liz a draft on f%uturiry, sometime hon
ored, but generally extended.
If the world dispizes q hypokrit, what
must they think ov him in Heaven! !
Flattcry is like Kolonc water-tew be smell
ov, not swallowed.
After all, there don't seem tew be but thia
difference between tho wize mon and tho
phools-tho wize men arc all fuss and sum
feathers, while tfc phools are all fuss and no
feathers.
Without friends and without oncmys il tho
last reliable ackount VIC havo .ov q stray dog.
Men generally, when they whip q mrulo,
sware tho mule remembers tho swareinp.
but forgits tho licking.
Sum folks wonder wharo awl tho tho iiea
cum from, but / don't; ono good liar yyill
pizcn o whole country.
Hunting after famc il like hunting after
fcas, hard tew kctoh, and sure tcw mako WI
uncazy if you do or don't kotch them.
Mcnny people spend their time tricinsgI TOW
find the hole wharc sin got into this world
If two mon brake through tho ice into.a mill
pond, thoy had better hunt for somto good hoio
tew git out, rathcr than git into d long arsua-
ment about tho holo they cum tow to fall ID.
lmaginashun, tow much indulgod in, soun.
is tortured into reality this liz one WY thai
good boss thiefs arc madc--a man leans over
Q fence all lay, and imaginos tho hoes. mi Tho
lot belongs tew him, and sure enuf, fht Sfust
dark night, tho boss does, Bd
il you must sohaw terbeckor, syotHg man,
for Heavens sake, chaw old plaSg; i ixs]ye
nastycst. III So
"A WOMAN is like iyyA-t5os siote youEs
ruined tho closer sho sGlinsHs koApnixa a 49,