Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1869-12-24

4 haS osofpNt az %fo,-pV.
i Congress takes n recess from the
22d inst, to the 5th of January.
1 1T Is reported that Brick Pomc-
roy's paper, the New York Democrat,
Is to be suspended.
4 Ladies wear 40 much false hair
with their own that II is difficult To
tell which Is switch.
A daughter of Professor Agassiz
is In the insane Asylum at Somer-
Vile, Mass. "a monnmaniac.
! Susan b. Anthony says she "can
have Susan Anthony on her tomb
stone. and not 'Reliet of some fool
of q man."
A confidential New Orleans clerk
stole six hundred dollars and q
daughter from his employer, and es-
capped North.
! The great Goodyear India rub.
her suit Is now before the Supreme
Court. The question Is as to the va.
lidity of the extension of the patent.
| Andrew johnson has come to be
a Moses mt last, Ife arrived within
sight of the promised land (the II. s..
Senate) but was not permitted to en-
ter in.
| "Ikcy,n says Mrs. partington the
other day. "this Economical Council
they're going to have in Rome is n
good thing. For things Is awful dear
since the war"
An Englishwoman, the other
day, earned thirty five dollars out of
the Queens pocket, by producing n
litter Of five children. She belonged
to the laboring class.
"A drunken man I'm New York
got his face into his hat the other
night, aud died OF snfiocation. The
moral Is, don't get n brick aud your
face in your hat simultaneously.
La Crosse. Wis, has been dis.
turbed 10y rumor that boarding
house keepers who serve hash to
their guests would hereafter be sub
ject To the internal revenue tax ON
manufacturers.
"A lady I'm Kansas. just from the
East, the other day. noticed an an.
imal from the ear window, and In.
quired Of the peanut boy If IL was n
buffalo. The boy answered I'm "A
neutrality-suspicious. "a mule.n
A spirited girl I'm Muscatiuc,
Iowa, told her lover that he must yet
steady employment before he spoke
to her again of marriage. He went
to work next morning ms n scavep-
ger, scfaped some money together,
and the day has been named.
THERE'S man in New Albany ac.
coriing to the Commercial, SO forget
ful OF faces that Ills wife is ounpelled
to keep a wafer stuck OH the end oi
her nose, that he may distinguish
her from other ladies'; but even this
does not prevent him from making
occasional mistakes.
-Soion Robinson. the agricultural
reporter of the y. Y. Tribune who has
been down to Macon, Ga. attending
the State Fair, epitomises as follows
Horse racing Is the ruling senti-
ment of the masses, whisky il more
plentiful than food, and the Ameri.
can flag does not wavc!n
, "A Boston Sunday school teache,
: asked little boy what matrimon,
was, but he Had in his mind the an
swer to aquestion about purgatory
: aud fired that Mt her: "a place ~
state of punishment In this life
where souls suffer for short tim,
before they go to Heaven" Wha
, could the teacher say?
The maddest man m Indiana live,
at Patoka. lie told his wife he wa
: going down cellar to commit suicide
and did go down and fire broadsid,
into pork barrel. Ills wife KEEP
right on knitting, and after Will,
the man came up stairs swearing tba
woman hadn't got any feeling. Til,
woman felt awful bad when she
found he had been fooling her.
"A smart young drummer who
rides ON the rail good deal ia Wis,
consin, has been In the habit ~
jumping Off from the cars mt station,
where opportunities offered ant
"kissing his sister, and then apollo
gizing when he discovered his mis-
take. He tried II OH as usual, III,
other day, when the damsel raise,
/ her veil and exclaimed, "Golly, boss
what you 'boul dar?'
"A farmer In Putnam county
Ind, has kept a pair of black snake,
In his barn several years, and al
kinds OF verInin have since entirel
disappeared. His cribs aud bins an,
no more disturbed by rats aud mice
They are better protection than
dozen eats, and are entirely harmless
towards chickens and domestic pur
pose are not the racers nor the spotte,
variety, hut n short, thick species, o
a Jet black color.
Fourteen Buffalo girls bav,
signed and sent this note to modes
young man: I'VE, the undersigned
have been comparing notes, and iint
that sou have been equally sweet Il
one and allof ns--tiiat you have puis
the same compliments to each, ant
made love in the same terms I'm ever,
case. We are indignant ut such du
plicity, AMI demand an explanation.
1 The ladies are quite right. TIE
young gentleman ought to explain
"A salesman in dry goods store
at Kansas City, Missouri, the other
day. observed u pale, aitenuated, and
apparently sorrow-stricken woman
cone Ealing u bundle Of laces under
her shawl. Very quietly, and with
out attracting the attention OF sim
gle eye In sthe store. the salesman
said to her: II am not able 10 pay
for the lace under your shawl, or you
might keep IL and welcome. Please