The Plymouth Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1869-1941, 1869-10-21
MISCELLANEOUS.
LOT 217.

LUI Slts
"AT forty shangs going at fort,
shangs! Did | hear two guinness OF
fcred thank you, sir. Two guinness i
in time. For the first time, at two gum
ness! For the second timel ANY advanc,
on two guinness? For the third and las
time-going at two guin-ness!"
Rap,
Name, if you please, sir9"
John Trumway,' | said, for the lO
was mine-LOt PIT. Whatever made me
buy the lot? am sure didn't want it
am afraid am one of those great grown
up children who are not safe to be trusted
out with money in their pockets, unless
coppers. The coins in my purse always
leap up with frantic desire to buy every
thing see, and the result is, that no mat
ter what sum go out with, always come
home penniless.
What on eartn could | want now with
second-hand, patent fire-proof, powder
proof, bomb proof, thiefproOf, iron safe,
constructed to resist fifty y-burglar-powcr
(nomlnal), case-hardened, undrillablc, un-
plckabl.<-, to be sold at bargain, owing to
the Key being lost, and the only man who
knew how to make another having gone
t.J sleep with his fathers9 When / re-
Elected about my purchase, began to feel
quite hot. There is no doubt it was bar
gain, or might have been, to somebody
but then, patent, unpickable iron safes
with the key lost, and owner-proOt, as well
rs thiefrgOof are not everybody's money,
however cheap. / had cold, creeping
doubt if they were mine. While the auc-
tioneer was describing it, and the people
Ill round the room Were yearning for it
in bids, / seemed to- see many remarkable
qualities emanating from the safe, like
perspiration, SO that its acquisition ap-
pearcd to me then peculiarly desirable
O.her people seemed similarly affected,
for its value increased momently. Some
ten or dozen persons had all i'm turn de
sired to be its fortunate pOsscssor, and all
ut increased rates. The man who bid
forty shangs" certainly must have seen
his way to turn the safe to account, or
why have bid forty shangs" at all: And
If SO, OF course it was plain there
must be way to turn it to
account, and one which few mo-
ments' quiet reflection apart from the
excitement OF the salerOom, would doubt
less reveal. 1t was something of this feel
ing made me bid the 1.-TWO guineas," or
Ut may be, the vaguer conviction that here
~ desirable to a number of nv fellow.
creatures, which evoked corresponding
and cnviOus desire in my own breast. But
now that the thing was mine, all the
iatcnt value which had before perspired
from it under the auctioneer's hands
seemed absorbed again into its Shamefully
rusty iron sides-it had become a misera
bic hundred-weight of useless old IRON
and l lOathed the very sight of it, espe-
cally when | thought of Mrs Trumway.
My wife is not woman of many words;
by no means the kind of woman verbally
to upbraid me for buying inconvertible
bargains, and she has had previous op-
portunlties for so doing, if so disposed.
Mrs RUNWAY never says anything. She
didn't when | once bought two hundred
weight OF puffy, bloated cheeses at two
pence per pound, and sold portions AFTER
wards to some poor people knew-as a
kIndness-at a trifling profit, and made
them all very poorly, and got summoned
before the magistrates, and fined for sell
ing cheese unfit for human food, and lost
cheese, temper, reputation, and "a los
No; at such times Mrs. Trumway makes
no remark; she only shifts. But the
amount of meaning conveyed by one oi
Mrs. T.'s sniffs is vOluminOus-nay, ency-
clOp;edic 1t means, 40 dear, yes; knew
how 'twould be. You've been at it again,
have you? Been cut with your money in
your pocket, and come home with nothing
bat your pocket left? Just like water in a
cOlander; the colander don't run away
mOre's the pity. No; it's always ready
for more. And here am i, pinching and
screwIng, and saving money, and allOwanc-
ing the house down to one box of 'Tand-
stickers week, and you going fooling
money away like this. Remonstrance,
Jonn, is perfectly useless. have awaked
to the conclusion that / have married an
incorrigible idiot; but / don't complain.
No; noodle you may be, but 1 am your
afcctionate wife, Martha Trumway." II
means Tar more than this it means every
recriminatOry epithet, which naturally
sensitive person, like me, can apply to
himself, after making the pleasing dis
coyery that he has taken himself in.
/ went home to dinner, which had been
waiting an hour / said nothing about
my purchase There was a small snifi,-a
very small One--expressive OF, It's not al
all, unlikely, John, though, mind, don't
accuse you of it without evidence; /; but
now / come to consider, it's rather more
likely than not that you've something on
your mind, and nothing in your purse. "
After dinner, L escaped up stairs to my
study. In the evening l saw it coming
up my garden-path on pair of trucks.
Should L go down? No; reflected |
would not go down. How detested the
thing now It didn't look worth half a
crown
Yes" / heard the servant say i'm
answer to- the man with the trucks; "this
is Mr. Trumway's."
"a Sos this" said the man I" and wish
him Joy of it, and shouldn't mind glass
of beer to wish it him in" i rfrr
Which conversation had the effect q.
bringing out Mrs. Il. Her comprehensive
mind must have taken in the situation at a
glance.
"Wherc is this from?' she asked the
man. SIS
From the saleroOm, IN"
john Ii was the voice Of my affec-
tionate wife addressed to her husband.
Have you been buying anything at a
sale?"
20 dear, yes," said /, calling down