Weekly Trinity journal., 1869-02-27

gaze you could not have helped but believe her
1 true and honest, and yet that was all false.
mother, d lie written on fair page She was
as cold and self-contained as ice She could
simulate every feeling, every passion, that makes
men worship woman. and yet keep the most
perfect mastery over herself. She never knew
l what it was to feel love she only cared for
power and the vanity of making men her slaves
they must come at her beck and call, fetch and
carry for her like dog, and when she had done
with them she cast them off like an old glove.
1 And you would have believed her, and men did
believe her, the asoftest gentlest; most lovable
creature in the world !, as dependent on them as
a child, as loving; as trusting as the purest,
most tendef!hearted woman God ever made.
Oh, mother why 10 falseness allowed totriumph
like that i? Why is mere selfish vanity permitted
to reign supreme, while faithful, loving hearts
are despised and contemned?
There was unusual festivities at the hall dur
ing the month that the Pelhams stayed there, and
Yolande made the conquest of every man who
came. They all hung over her chair, fattered
her, sought her society, and she had smiles for
them all; her eyes were bright for each in turn, ,
ber voice low and ,caressing, / was also there
too as matter of course l was Invited, and
could not keep away. Charlie came very seldom
to the rectory after the first ten days there was
always some excuse; when be did, his manner
was lstless and be had little to say. And IL
was silent too my heart was full. I dared not
speak lest he should hear the tears in my voice.
Oh, Charlie when l think now, to-day, how
loved you, how my heart was torn with anguish
as saw your love slipping slowly, surely away
from me, my eyes rain tears, my voice is broken
| by sobs. Oh my darling my darling if you
could only have known how true and faithful
my heart would, always be to you, would you
have cared SO much more for bright eyes and a
brilliant wit than the love that would never have
failed you till your life's end or mine
! AT the hall, l, watching hreathlessly, my very
soul in my eyes, saw him growing restless,
moody, miserable, when Yolande talked with
other men saw him brighten and soften when
she turned to him, and then saw her let heI
maddening eyes Il felt that they were madden.
ing to men) dwell yearnngly, lingeringly on him
and fall slowly, sadly, consciously away, and she
would sigh little low sigh, then q smoulderine
stihed FIRE would blaze up suddenly in his face
Then hated her-oh God how hated her.
Do weary you, little mother, sitting there Sc
patiently, your hands still folded, your eyes still
wet with divine PITY am coming to the ent
| now. . - ,.tf-- ,oo
1t was one afternoon in February, clear, colo
day. with bright sky. had been expecting
Charlie; he had promised to come down and
fetch me; but Maggie came, instead. We sal
| together for some time, and then fetched my
hat to go with her up to the hall. 1t was almost
dark when we reached the door. 9o. o'
C Go in the drawing-room, KATIE she said.
I" want to see Stevens; Twill be with you d.
rectly.''
| The door was ajar. and entered. The room
was nearly dark, and went up to the fireplace,
and put one foot on the fender. Suddenly
started-I was not alone-the sound of voices
came from behind the half-drawn curtains that
covered the embrasures of the widow.
"Yolande must go away; ] cannot bear
this torture any longer. 1t drives me mad to see
other men looking into your eyes, and you smil-
ing at them" s'f'''' 80" gH
| g That is strange, Mr., Calvert, when you
yourself are engaged" These words were cold
in themselves, but the voice that uttered them
was so low and thrilling, even felt deep down
in my failing heart the effect they were intended
to produce. ,4,.j.5 ~ sa
81 know l am blackguard," came the quick
| response. " l loathe and despise myself. She
is the dearest best little creature in the world,
but oh, Yolande believe you are witch, a
| fend-something more than human-you turn
the blood in my veins to fire l am almost mad
when | look into your eyes, or touch your
hand" r5 aE
"Do you love me then so much? ~ My heart
stood still until the answer came in deep con-
centrated voice. "
So much, that if might have you in my
arms this minute, would pray that we might
both die, that no other man might ever hold you
so again "
Sick, faint, staggering, crawled from the
| room, and then as 1 felt the keen cold air blow
against my, cheek, fed ont into the darkness
and home to the old rectory. Oh, that night,
that night should ever Forget it if | lived on
forever, like Tthonus7 Thank God, the lives
that are so bitter are but a,span L. Is it wrong
| to say that? Oh, how often, how often have
longed fot the end longed passionalely and
| yainly. - s. 's1 '~e.tfi .. ~ 81
Papa was away from home. Allthe next day
sat in stupor over the fire then, late in the
afternoon the door opened and Charlie came in
He came up to kiss me as usual, but shrank
away, not because felt bitter or angry, but be.
cause knew it was an effort to him now he NO
longer loved me- 5sq 7.9 f---e&G4e ia-Af
C Katie he said, and at the sound of his
voice all strength left me, and burst into bitter
crying " Katie" he said again softly, 'tpoor
little girl what is it ?" n def
Was it unmaidenly, was it wanting in pride
Oh, what had to do with pride when he was
life or death to me? laid my hand on his
breast sobbng like the poorest, sorrowfullest lit
tie child, and moaned out e9a i9ii.ij5
Charlie, ldon't you love me any longer ?''9a4
! felt his quick start, and then he put both
arms round me, and kissed me, but answered
nothing. 9 sL9 ZIP 'as ~ Gs 90.
~ konw is alli / said, lying quite still, for
knew it was the last time my head would ever
be pillowed there. I" heard you tell her you
would like to die with her in your arms" y
'.oh, child, forgive mel he cried, in a
broken voice 81 was mad, did not know
what ] was saying. 49,, ~ ,s..,e ,df ss,su M
Forgive your" said mechanically |" Oh,
yes, forgive you. 1t was mistake all through.
fwas not good enough for you, poor, little coun-
fsy-bred girl like me.'Ya 7l s7b9g pigF b9i9.f"
+" Don't Kate!' he cried, with . asti1sd sob IN
his throat.
81 am not clever, not beautiful, only ! loved
you so: i would have laid down my lie lo'
you" esjaj.,s sa. l.ni ,giiil17, x,..r,yo : ,,oan-
ed srI viii never see her again" ,,-,.ss,..;,r
ssYeef' said, slowly and painful? -s, .or.s 1os
out the words, you will see her Lo.nsn snu viii
will tell her that free and .asa {Sa ray as
take her in your arms, and forget ha.e
if .he we're dead and buried in the cnu.o 49,
In ~ hsr mother How could ! say saooss .s
lords why did they, come into my m'na .nen
dont know, but remember es saying lnem 50
well. ,.,.. .ho. a,;ttje Katie n ;s not
81, - - @sE ~ .ssfl TEa~ - 3g9.fgf1
A1s g GGood-bye Charlie" and raised my bead.
L. vnu