The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1869-07-29
CHIPS.

A Miss which nobody ikcs-misfor-
tune. AMiss which everybody does like
- Miss Fortune,
A good joke, Ijko a guide board, has
a special point and like piano playing,
requires a little lingering.
1t Is suid tho furniture dealers have a
new name for single beds, They call
them unthony's
God hears the heart though without
words; but he mover hears words without
the heart.
Did the man who wrote the song,-
There's music IN the midnight breeSo,
rs'er to eais9
A Goorgi, minister has discovered
that the fruit that Eve gave Adam was TO.
baccol
Why is prudent man ike pin?-
Because his head prevents him going too
far
Moral for tbo boadoir-lhc ignorance
chat is bowilchog in young IOdy. is r-
diouIous in an old one.
Some thoughts always Gnds us young
and keeps US SO. Such thought is tho
love Of the universal and eternOI beauty.
The diocovcry Of what is true, aid
the practice OF what is good, are the two
most important objcc's Of life.
No, much eating gives strength. but
digesing our food; so knowledge is pow.
tr for evil or for good.
Topem who travel about with red
noses shopld bo indicted for circulating
iuccndiary arIioIos,'
The most impudout of all things is
mirror for it is continually casling 70.
Elections.
The man who madc an impression on
the hear! Of a coquctto has taken out a
patent for sIone'cutling'
Iryou begin to apologize for what
cannot be defended you will end by de-
Tending what cannot be ap6logized lor.
No legislation aimed ot the vices Of the
poor, while Gpnfing those of the rich
con ever be upheld in this country,
Greatness is not always necessary
accompaniment of goodness. Consider
how many great fools there arc 10 every.
eonsidsrSBfS community.
What is that which was horn without
0 soul, lived and contained soul yet
died without soul? The whale lhat
swallowed Jonah,
The present air'tight pnnlaOons will
not probably go another scBsOn. Ply
siologis's say il acts unravorably on 'he
skin.
It is stated that the number Of Germ.
dn newspapers published in the Uuited
States is over 250, about 10 of them be-
ing daiIies.
A certain David Fender, popping the
question in letter, concluded thus
Aud should you say yes. dear Mary,
will truly bo your D. Fender.
Men may loiler but time flies en- the
wings of The wind, and all the great in
ieresls of liro IRE speeding on with tho
sure and silent tread of dcstioy.
He who combals his own evil plss.
ions and desires. enters into tho seVOresL
battle of life; and he who combats sue
cessfully, obloJs the greatest victory.
He that hath book in ono hand,
but not lesson Of it in his heart or life
is like an Oss that cnrrieth rich burden
and feeds upon dog thistlcs.
A Quaker once hearing person tell
how much he folt for another who was
in distress and needed assistance dryly
asked him, Friend bast thou ever felt in
thy pocket for himi
Ladies' don'sknow whn,her they like
smoking or not. With special faSciiies
they like it, with general iavoriles they
don't dislike it and with no ldyori!es
they detcU! it,
The basis OF Freemnsonry is gratitude
10 the First Of Beings ami the study of
nature; it's bond Of union is morality, Its
aim the perfection and happiness Of man
and its ,csull charity.
A hen-pcckcd husband writes;, Be.
fore marriage | faocied welded liIG
would bo oil sunshine; but afterwards
found out that it was oil moonshine,
A friend observing q lady about to
purcl,asera,wire palpitator OF one OF our
fashionable shops, was hoord to remark
that she was about laying the wires for
a new campaign,
Circumstance either command or are
commanded. They form tho character
=!