North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1869-11-10
McGREGOR, IOWA, WEDNESDAY, NOV. 10, 1869
How they Sleep out West.

NOW tney sleep out west.
l haven't dated this letter because
don't know where I am. am about nine
miles from Ju!esburg, little settlement
on the South Platte river. AT daylight
tomorrow am to catch some ofthe finest
salmon you ever saw. They will not bite
at any other time Of the day. I suppose
they learned this disagreeable habit OF
! early breakfasting from the "Bull Whack.
ers'' who navigate these plains. l am
stopping at a little hotel about thirty by
ten feet. The scarcest thing in this coun>
try is lumber, settlers having to pay ever
so many dollars foot for what they use,
besides what they brought in their valises.
The landlord is from Pennsylvania, and
seems to be doing a thriving business. By
dint of hard talking and liberal promises,
got room to myself. 1t is just large
enough for the bed, and a candle-box Sc,
on chair upon which am writing this
letter.
1t is in one end of the building and
separated from the next room by a bed
quilt, which you must crawl under to
come in or go out. But it is my room, and
after the jolting l have had upon the In
dian pony, / expect to have a good
night's-
Was ever a poor pilgrim in such fix
Just as I had written nights" above, and
had sleep on the point Of my pen heard
a knocking on the floor outside the bed
quilt. ''Crawl UNDER" said I.
Enter the landlords daughter, buxom
young lady about seventeen years of age
I should judge. She opened her rosy lip,
and spoke as follows:
Mister don't take off your clothes to-
night when you go to bed"
"Why?''
''Becouse l am going to sleep will
you"
"Well, if you have no better reason
than that
"Hush, shet up! You told par tha
you would not sleep with man,
I'D rather sleep with wet dog.'
"Well have given up my bed to sicl
s man. have been hard at work all day
and have to work hard all day tomorrow
!. and l can't afford to set up all night. Tha
bed is wide enough for us both. l sha
stay on the back side, and if you don
stay on your side, you'd better, that
ALL"
As she said this she raised from h,
dress pocket an Internal jack>knife. sue
as farmers use in trimming fruit trees, al
= then let it fall back with chug. COZ
pretended this situation in half momer
and unto this maiden quoth as follows:
Miss, young lady, your intentions ma
or may not, be honorable. am traveli
~ entirely by myself. My natural prote
tors are miles and miles away beyond t
prairies, ignorant Of the perils which m
beset their idol. Thus far have not be
= insulted by your sex. am a man of fl
:, words, but they are always emphatic.
will give you up part of that bed, Al
to that's all will do. If you attempt. dr
: ing the silent watches of the night, an
y thina contrary to this firm determinatio
by St. Joseph, my patron saint, / W
shoot you right through the midriff.'
= As l concluded. laid Slocum pist
ct upon the candle-box. A low chuck
Cd outside the bed quilt gave token that pa,
famitias had Leard and approved the q
- rangement.
lis My antagonist laughed, and sayin
he sinister, reckon we understand ca
other," bounced over and took the ba
! side of the bed. There she is now pr
J. tending to be asleep. cannot finish IL
letter. l cannot do anything. Talk a5o
the trials Of the earlier saints, abo
being broiled over live Goals, about bel
s, aayed alive, about being boiled in Q
What was all that to this p Correspon
HE ence Of Louisville Express.