Lamoille newsdealer. [volume] (Hyde Park, Vt.) 1860-1877, 1869-05-11

won't do it for him or any other man.
MdRqqttvs MMhqt shall | d.? All! | have it, to-
York and have him send me his Tass OH
the Railroad, and think will 60 home.
think Washington a rery unhealthy place.
VIII you send me the pass l have
concluded not to call again upon the Pres
idcnt. Yours truly, j. WrLLcurr.
BREVlTlES.
Those who live in Omaha are known
as Omahogs,
What is the best stimulant for the hare2
The grey hound. .,
Brigham Young is indeed pillar of
Sa!t Lake His wife is Lots.
What kind of food makes the but
terfy in winter? Buckwheat cakes.
When did Moses sleep with five in
bed? When he slept with his fore-fathers.
An Illinois railway is having freight
cars built, on which will be painted these
words &C From Ocean to Ocean-No Trans
fer" ......
Kansas is to have the best system of
railroads constructed and projected of all
States in the Union.
"A lady Of Chicago keeps list of her
male acquaintance in a pocket-diary, and
calls it her him book.
Ladies, do not judge Of the intelli-
gence of your male acquaintances by the
length of their mustachc. ...f
Who would not live in Iowa That
ta'e is entirely cut of 6ebt, and has
over million surplus. @
The science of v.locipede riding is
comprised in three words You straddle,
paddle and then skedaddlc.
wntreh N9ffiha Is tie y rSwttIYl IYl"pp6i"s 2" hw
''who keeps the factory there" ~
Josh Billings says he will never pat
rcnizc lottery so long as he can hire
anybody else to rob him at reasonable
wages.
The fitness of women for Office will
no longer be. questioned. A postmistress
in PENNSYLVANIA has been caught robbing
the mails.
The Chicago people have at last had
demonstrated .tc their entire satisfaction
that Chicago is not in Illinois, but that
Illinois is in Chicago. y rt
In Oregon, "bibulation" is regarded
as a preventive of the smallpox, now ep-
ilemc in that State, and the new invita-
ton is "let's disinfect."
A sign in Pittsfeld Mass, which till
recently read as follows: Cooling done
heer," has been changed to read as fol-
lows "maid & repaired"
1T is now a law in New York that
! any man who will keep and maintain a
public watering trough on the highway
shall have an abatement of So from his
taxes.
, "A Southern editor evidently hem
peckcd) says that ''if, in our school-days
the 'rulc Of three is proverbially trying,
a how much harder, in after life, do We feel
t the rule of one.
j - Any business is more respectable
+ than what is termed loafing. A young
o lran had much better cell clans by the
+; pailfull than hang around the public re.
sorts, numbering time and his own repu
C tation.
" My son." said an anxious father
+ ''what makes You use that nasty tobac
co 2" ~ #a 9Hl tFi8 ,.s,~
&: The boy, declining to consider the ques
= tion in the spirit in which it was asked
81 replied ITO get the juice"
| 1t may seem strange, but it is true
h that man in New York, perfectly uned
ID ucatcd in art, took half dozen exquisit
portraits in less than half an hour. W
er must add, however, that the police 500
Sc afterwards took him. 1"
u AN English lady in Paris was out {
ID al atience and spirits at hearing nothin
.; but French, day after day, One norr
If ing she heard cock growing, and e,
ke claimed s@ Wy '''a. w
ny "pm thankful there is somebody VII
speaks English 20 ils ? b
,fi "A negro preacher, recently arreste
ng in New Orleans as disorderly persol
0; was unable to pay tho iue imposed. I
me was about to be committed, when hapI
We thought struck hm-"lf your Honor "
e's trust me till Monday, Ill take up G,
nv lection Tomorrow" Uo was trusted.