Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1869-10-28
ner-table is the greatest stranger possi-

1
good dinner but there was too much
talking, and too much space between
the courses. The time might have been
filed better, and where there are these
delays men will drink more wine than
they otherwise would The conse-
quence is, they tell too long and too
marvellous stories.
Fred calls this the "Feast CT Rea-
son." &c. He should be ashamed of
such trite and absurd quotation. If
he boarded. at Mrs McSkinner's and
dined at Fulton Market he would know
better than to talk when he should be
eating.
| One of the guests Il don't consider
myself guest at Fred's. but lanai
de la maison-at least used to be) was
an Irishman--an Irish gentleman Fred
called him. To my taste, gentlemen
should be less prosy. He was full of
his stories-could not wait for dinner
to be done, and the proper time for
story telling, if such thing must be,
to come. Twas just getting ready-it
was after the soup-to mention little
adventure at Naples-in the cratur of
Vesuvius, in fact-because | really
thought it might interest the company.
Fred may have heard of it before, but
they had not, and it was suggested
very neatly by the vermicelli. Fred
cut in upon me by asking that provok
ing Patlander, that ferocious Fenian, if
he had been cheated much by the
hackmen in this country.
Nothing to speak Of" said he, "af
ter Dublin. l was seasoned there
You can't satisfy Dublin car driver
We tried it once when | was in her
Majesty's service-Twenty- sixth line
regiment. A bet was made at mess on
the subject, and Arthur Ponsonby took
it in ponies. If the man asked for
more he was to lose. Pom called car
to take couple of US to the theatre
the maker of the bet, and myself as
umpire. The theater was only a
square off. When we alighted he
pulled out a sovereign and tossed i
to the driver, saying, "Here, Mickey,
that will do for you for our bit of a
drive, won't it?" Pom meant to make
a sure thing, but he had overdone it
Mickey looked at the coin moment to
see if it was good, then at the faces OF
us watching, and he seemed to have
an instinct of what was up, for he
pulled a regular -blarney face and be-
gan, "Ah, 'onor, captain, sure it's a
purity piece, and 'oudn't it be a
shame in me to break it drinkin' yer
honor's health? Couldn't ye spare me
the small sixpence to the back of it?''
Pom paid the bet, but he never could
stand the chatting he got in conse-
quence.
They all laughed at his trumpery an
ecdote, which | would have capped
with far better one. but just then the
fish came on and | had to give my mind
to the salmon, so l lost my chance.
After fish l was thinking of very
striking fact which happened to me in
Iceland, and just running over the
heads in my mind before telling the
story, when my Visa ais, an English
man, struck in ahead of me. | do not
say an English gentleman for l do not
consider that there is such thing in
existence; the English are nation of
snobs. always domlneering and putting
out of the way better men. And nc
Englishman in my experience ever tells
story without embroidery. If you
want to know what an Englishman is
Just read Sir John Mandeville's travels
"Oh, yes, but quite different sor
of a man, l assure you"
81 dessay he is; only the name some
how reminded me of Merivale. q
never taste salmon; capital salmon this
Mr.. Simmons. l suppose it is as easy
to bring it from Norway here as it is tC
us. Only a little more ice, and, by
Jove! you seem to have ice in loads.
Well, as 1 was saying, never see sal
mon without thinking Of Merivale.-
The Sixteenth, you know, were famous
for being the greatest puppies in thu
service, and Merivale was leading the
,, pack; at least, between him and Charley
French it was neck and neck. me
them once at the Marquis of Down
shire's. (Why must an EnglishmaI
always lug in a lord?) "One night ii
the smoking room French lisped out
L say, Motheth - he alway
: : called Merlvale Moses, and Merival
l always took it from him, though h
would have had out with what at an,
; other man ii thay Motheth, l thay
: your twain, fwiend, Prince Thalm
Thalm, dining at the Wag and Famish
and 1 thay, what do you think b
wath DOING 'Pon me wawd. l don
know. What did he do?' drawle
o Merivale. He took cold buttah wit
his thalmon. Did he daye?' "
had beautiful thing on the end {
. my tongue about gravy, only coul
! not get it into shape before leg {
Southdown mutton was brought il
+ which changed the subject somewhat
N IL was DOutuuOnu, duu do III LuuteO
a is not always tender, l confess wa
v eager to pay my respects to 1t; an
!, = when it went out l was IN such
. happy frame of mind that l coul
= y not think of the point of good ar
= : ecdote which the late Louis Phillip
! always used to tell when | dined wit
= him at the Tuilleries. No such goo
stories are told there now.
However, 1 do think Fred Nigh
10 have asked me for it, and that woul
o have given me time to think as well
). have recalled the anecdote. Instead 0
It that, he turned to my neighbor a Bos
, ton man and asked if he was as font
l. of billiards as ever.
j. ] say a Boston man, because b
IN wore a coat and pantaloons and thos
,r absurd English side whiskers--"Pics
D. dilly weepers''-but l never feel sur
,e that these Boston men are not stron
e. minded women in disguise. / have
Il