Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1869-08-25
The Perlls of Drinking Bad Whisky.
From the Georgia Constitutionalist.I

From the Georgia Constitutionalist.l
Many years ago, when the State OF
Georgia was in its infancy, one of the
Circuit Judges was Bella Brown, an
ancestor of the recent "secesh" Gov
ernor Of that name. He was a man
OF ability and integrity, but like a
good many distinguished persons of
that day, he loved a social glass: and
whenever the members of the bar
would turn in and help, he sometimes
drank to excess and become gloriOusIy
fuddled. On one occasion, while trav-
cling on circuit, he reached the viii
lage of Dayton, in DOOly county,
where the Court was to be opened
next day, and took quarters with a
relative of his wife, that lady accom-
panying him. After supper Judge
| Brown strOlled over to the only tavern
in the place, kept by one Sterritt,
where he met a number of his legal
friends. A convivial evening was
passed drinks frequently went round
and somewhere about midnight, the
Honorable Bella was in a state of mind
quite the reverse of that implied by
the old saw, 'Sober as a Judge. ~
When he was leaving for home, one
of the young lawyers, in a spirit of
mischief, slyly passed some spoons
from the tumbleTs into the Judges
pocket.
On dressing himself next morning
the eccentric official, putting his hand
into his pocket, was greatly perplexed
in discovering three or four silver
spoons.
MY GodI Polly" said he to his
wife, '.just look here; l believe I've
stolen some of Sterritt's spoons"
Lets see them," says the WIFE
"Yes, sure enOugh-here's his verita-
bic initials! Pray how did you hap
pen TO have them in your pOeket?"
II think L must have been drunk
when came home, wasn't {? inquir-
ed the Judge.
YES" replied the devoted Polly,
''you know your old habit when you
get among those lawyers.
Certainly; can understand easy
enough how it all came about. That
fellow, Sterritt, keeps the meanest
liquor in the State; but L never sup
posed that to drink it would make a
man steal ~
The spoons were duly returned to
the landlord, and the Judge went and
opened his Court, thinking no more
about the matter. Several days elapsed
and the business of the Court was
drawing to q close, when one morning
a rough-lOoking customer was arraign-
ed before his Honor for larceny. He
pleaded guilty, but said in mitigation
that he was drunk at the time of COM
mitting the offense.
"What is the nature of the charge
against the MANI" inquired Judge
Brown.
Stealing money from the till at
tavern" replied the clerk.
young man." said the Judge, SOL
emnly, "are you sure you was intoXi- !
Gated when you took this money ?"
Eyes, your Honor, was so jolly |
drunk that things looked like they |
were dancing double-shutfies, and /
when l went out doors the ground /
kept coming up and hitting me in the |
head"
"That will do" replied the judge.
''But tell me, did you get all the liquor
you drank at Sterritt's?"
''Every drop of it, your honor"
''And so you got tipsy on his liquor
and then stole his mOney?n
"That's it exactly; didn't know
what 1 was doing"
Turning to representing attorney,
the worthy magistrate said: "Thisis
4 most extraordinary case, Mr.. AttOr-
ney, and one, 1 think, demanding the
,lemency of the Court. You will,
do me the favor of entering
/ nol5e IroSeqtti. That liquor of Ster-
tits, 1 have reason to know, is mean
enough to make man do anything
lirty. I got drunk on it myself, the
,ther night, and stole all his spoons.
# Sterritt will sell such abominable
tuff, he ought not to have the protee-
ion of this Court. You may release
he prisoner, Mr.. Sheriff"