The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1869-06-22
Cousin Sally billiard OufdOne.

Cousin Sally billiard OufdOne.
TIE following humorous article was
handed us for publication by friend =
We do not know in wha, paper it first ap-
peared, but it was copied, we understand
very extensively 1t is q good thing
and we think it worth republishing. 1t
happened before the war:
Scene at Chatham during the session
of, the Circuit Court, in the common
wealth vs. Cassidy, on charge of ma
licious stabbing.
The venire being empanueled, and the
jury solemnly charged by the clerk, the
Commemorative Attorney called, in
support Of the indictment, the witness,
Buck Bryant, who being solmnly sworn,
the truth to tell, testified as follows:
Question by Commonwealth Attor
lney.-Tell all you know about the cut
/ ting Of the prosecutor, by Cassady, the
prisoner at the bar.
Answer.-Wel., gentlemen, it was ell
ection day-'twas dark, cloudy. wet
sort of drizzly day, ana says 1 to my
old woman, / believe FIJI 60 down to
Ringold and post my vote And says my
old woman to me, well, Buck, as it is
sort Of drizzly day, says she, hadn't
you better take your umbril SAYS /
to the old woman, spec I had better
take the umbrill and advanced down to-
ward Ringold, and when l got down
thar, Mr.. Cole coined, and says he I'm
Gle Buck, have you seen anything of old
neighbor Harris? Says l to Mr. Cole,
for why? Says he he's got my umbrill.
(The witness was here interrupted by
the Court and told to confne himself to
the actual fray between the prisoner and
Cole, the prosecutor. In answer to
which the witness remarked, in tone
Of indignant remonstrance, we'll now,
Mr.. Judge you hold on, for 1 am sworn
to tell the truth, and I am gwine to
tell it my own way-so 'tant forwhile
for you to say anything more about it,
whereupon the court and common
wealth's attorney, being anxious to get
rid of the witness on any terms, told
him to go on and tel the tale in his own
way
Well as I was going on to say, twas
on lection day. Buchanan and Filmo
was running for the legislator, and says
l to my old woman, says l, b'leve I'll
go down to Ringold, and post my vote.
Says my old woman to me, says She
Buck, as it is a sort Of dark, cloudy,
rainy, damp, ,drizzly sort of day, hadn't
you better take your umbrill, says she ?
Says to the old woman, says l, l spec
I had better take my umbrill; so l tuck
the umbrill and advanced on towards
Ringold, till 1 arrived thar Well, the
first thing l did when got thar was to,
take drink of Buchanan whiskey, which
was monstrous good, and says / to my.
self, says I old hoss, you feel better
don't you? and while l was advancing
around, Mr.. Cole he came to me; says
he, Uncle Buck, says he, have you seen
anything of Old peighbor Harris :? Says
/, for why? Says he, the old cocks
got my umbrill After while, l pos
tied my vote and then Mr.. Cole and me
advanced back towards home, and Mr..
Cole was tighter than ever seed him.
And so we advanced along till We got
to whar. the road and path forked, and
Mr.. Cole and me tuck the path, as any
other gentleman would, and arter ad-
yancing while we arriv to old neigh
Dor Harris setting on log with the
.umbrill on his arm, and bout that time
Elijah Cassidy (the prisoner) coined up,
and we advanced on till we arriv at Eli
iah's house. Elijah is my neffew and
likewise my n-law-he married my
darter Jane, which is next to my darter
Sally. Arter we had advanced to Eli
jah's house we stood in the yard while
jawing, and presently two somebodies
rid up on a hoss, which Johnsun before,
and Whitfield Cassidy behind-Whit-
field and Kiah Cassidy being the same.
Elijah and Kiah is brothers, both born
in the natural way like anybody else's
brothers, no gals between 'em and both
Of 'em is about the same age; especial
| ly Kiah, which ar the youngest. Kiah
war drunk, and Mr.. Cole got to cussing
one another about politix; and advan-
ced in the house whar was Elijah's wife,
which is my darter Jane, which is next
to my darter Sally. Well arter a jawing
while with 'em my little neffew says he
to me, says he, Uncle Buck, let's go
home. Says I, good pop, so we pegged
on together, and I heard somebody a
calling me, but 'tentioned 'ern nor ad
vanced back Well, l got home and
was eating my supper, and Elijah, which
is my son in-law, and married my darter
Jane, which is next to my darter Sally,
arrived, and said to me Uncle Buck,
says he, I've killed a man. Says l., the
hell YOU have. And this is all / know
about the stabbing, because | want thar.