Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1869-10-02


hut the wonlan would not be pooh-poohcd,
and he had to take her up to the gentle
mans apartments, and confront him with
the complaint.
She told her story at length; the young
man waited patiently until she was quite
durc and then said
"Sir. this woman, has spoiled my nights
rest for this month past. l have COM
planned, have entrcated; she has scorned
my requests and prayers. | could not re-
vengc myself upon awoman; but herdonk-
cy, WHO is masculine, had no such clam
upon my torbcarance; besides. the pecn-
liar cries of The animal is what IS most dis
trcssin- 20 me. This donkey. isas avarlc'-
ous as his mistress, has sister upon whose
succession he counted but who Is going to
marry again ii was this news. whispered
bv me in his ear. which cXaspcratcd him to
such degree that he conducted himself
in so violent Il manner
The comnlissary, who could hardly keep
his countcnancc. said that the young man
had better pay for the milk that was spit,
and advised the milkwoman t" move her
station beyond the reach of II man who had
such peculiar power Of convcrslnS with an
imalS.
Both aSscntcl. and the woman took the
money. crossed herself. and went.
And now thrn,' said the commlNsary
to the young man. how did you do :"
"a dropped lighted fuse i'll the brute $
ear said he.
The French thieves sometimes used to
steal 50 funnily that even their victims
were half inclined to pardon them.
The Duke OF frousac, nephew OF Mar
sllal Rirhclicu, was coming out OF the op-
era one night in splendid dress cmhroid-
cred with pearls, when two thieves man
arcl to cut oft his coat tails. He turned
into his club where everybody laughed at
him, and 50 he found out what had hap
pcncd. and went home. Early the next
morning well dressed man called at the
Dukes hotel and demanded to see him at
once OH Il matter of vital importance. Mon
sieur dc frausac was awakened.
Munse-neur," said the visitor, g AIN
an officer Of the Police. Monsieur the
Lieutenant of police has learned the acci
dent which happened to you yesterday on
leaving the opera. and have been sent by
him to request YOU to ORDER the coat to be
placed in my hands, that they may convict
the offender, ny comparingit 1t with tkc mu-
tilated tails.'
The dress was given up, and the Duke
was in rapturc' with the vigilance of the
police But it was Il new trick OF the rogue
! who had stolen the tails, by which means
The ancic:tS used to indulge in rract:-
cal jokcs to Il considerable extent; for in
stance, the Thracians ut their drinking
parties sometimes played the game of hang
ing. They fixed round moose to the
bough Of tree, and placed underneath it
| Il stone OF such shape that it would easily
turn round when amy one stood Oh it,
Then they drew lots; and he who drew
the lot took Il sickle in his hand, stood on
the stone, and put his neck into the halter.
The stone was kicked away; and iihc could
. cut himself down with his sickle, well and
good but if he was not quick enough, he
was hanged outright; :" and the rest laugh,
thinkn" it good sport"
Then there was some old gcntlcman-1
forgot his name aud naton--who pretend
ed to make friends with his enemy, and
asked him to dinner; and, for the last
course, large dish was brought in, which
proved, when uncovered, to contain the
heads Of the guests wife and children.
This was carrying the joke almost too far.
Ncro's jcsts were likewise very practical.
"Wh hat a fat fellow that Senator is he
observed one day to a courier; "sec me
cut him in two" and he did it in the
most tacctious manner.
Indeed, in the early stage of civilization,
practical wit is apt to be grim; as society
advances, jokes at other peoples expense
arc not quite so hcartlcss; when we reach
Il certain pitch of refinement, nothing gives
us pleasure which causes pain to another,
and then there is a chance Of practical jok-
ing dying out altogcther-cxccpt in the
case of boys, who will probably never be
humanizcd.