The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1869-01-29


Keokuk Qowa) girls think it great
shame that leap year is not made per-
manent institution.
Why is baby like wheat? Because
it is first graded, then thrashed, and d.
nally becomes the flower of the family
Bets have been made that Gen. Grants
inaugural will be the shortest ever de-
livered, but it will hardly be briefer than
the immortal speech of Mr.. Lincoln on
the occasion of his second Inauguration.
Young men should be careful how
they wink at young ladies in the street.
A young man in Wisconsin was nned
five dollars for the offence the other
day.
Thirty-six McGregor Qowa) girls
popped the question to bashful SWANS
last year, were accepted, got married,
settled with the parson and are now do
ing finely.
A divine informed sailor that the
devil was chained up. allow long lie
the rope ?" "Oh," was the dignified re-
ply, cit extends over the world" ''DOes
it 2" rejoined Jack, eff that's so the lub-
Der might just as well be loose"
At Neosho (Kansas) dancing party,
the other night, the highly perfumed
head of a young man ran into the gas
light, whereupon his hair blazed up two
feet, causing IAN awful smell of oil,
hair, etc., for few minutes after
ward"
The engine house at Harper's Ferry,
so heroically defended by old John
Brown and his men, has, with other
buildings, been presented by Congress
to q college for colOred men, and the
bill was signed by Andrew johnson.
The publishers of Junius Henri
Brownies Great Metropolis are rum
ming three presses night and day, but
they are unable to meet the demand for
the book. 10000 copies were ordered
in advance of publication.
The New York Times reports that
the excellent chaplain of the House, at
Washington, who opens the proceed
ings with prayer, is beset by the MEM
bers with requests to offer up petitions
for the successful passage through Con-
gress of their bills and resolutions.
Water has been found after sinking q
shaft of 81 feet deep, at the Aleman on
the Tornado del Mucrto Journey of
DEATH, q ninety mile waterless desert
in the southern part of New Mexico
The Aleman camp is about thirty-six
miles from the northern end of the
Tornado.
The people of Detroit were very much
astonished on New Years day to see
the waters Of the Detroit river flowing
up stream. The oldest inhabitant had
never witnessed the like before. Tho
phenomenon lasted six hours, and is
supposed to have been caused by the
banking up of the waters Of Lake Erie
at the mouth of the river by strong
wind.
A Partisan savant informs the world
that "glovers make gloves of peculiar
form for the North American trade,
which European hands could not wear.
The fingers are made of an apparently
unreasonable length, but which barely
suffices for the exigencies Of q Yankee
hand" He concludes from this. and
other signs that we are rapidly acquir-
ing the physical and mental pecuIiari-
ties of the Indian.
HYDRoPHoBTA.-Eever forget this,
but preserve it in your scrap book. The
bite must be bathed as soon as possible
with warm vinegar and water, and
when this has dried, q few drops of
muriatic acid poured upon the wound
will destroy the poison of the saliva
and relieve the patient from all present
or future danger.
A smart young man visiting q prison
in Maine, inquired of some of the pris>
oners the cause Of their being in such q
place. At last he asked 9 small girl
the cause of her being In prison. Her
ans wer was "that she stole saw mill,
and went back after the pond and was
| arrested"
The young man LEFT Immediately.
ROUGH ON JoHx.--It is related of
Speer, of the Lawrence Tribune, that
he tells this story of himselfs
@H went to drug store early the 9TH
err day for sick friend. The night
clerk objected to giving it to me with
out prescription, evidently fearing that
intended suicide. sPsheW z said ], do
look like q man who would Kill! him
seifP Gazing at me steadily for mo-
ment, he replied, 4 don't know: seems
to me If looked like you, should he
greatly tempted to kill myself
At q recent examination in . eirPs
school, the question was put to . class
of little ones: ssWho makes thu laws OF
our Government" s9Congress.1 was
the ready reply. aHoW Is Congress
divided % was thu next Question. But
the little girl TO when the question
was put failed to snsWer t. Another
little girl In the class raised M Sas
hand, indicating that she ee8ld - :
il. well said the exAns ..sweg
sesIis, Whist 90 jos s..ss, Misc
! dence - with an air Of es5isfi.
/ caIs- sseil as triumsE the arswsr
: Civilized, hall civilized and