The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1869-10-28
.pOIlIl Smith.
BY JOHN d. SHERWOOD.


There is, we think, but little doubt that the
Hebrew Samson, the Greek Hercules, the Span
ish Cid, the Scandinavian Thor and the English
Arthur of the Round Table were each the John
Smith of his nation and time, multiform unity
swinging around the circle of varied labor, hard
work, and heroic deeds, accomplished under one
name-a family one, possessed at various times
by several individuals-the work of all reapers,
eewing-machines, cow-milkers, cotton and
woollen factories. These national heroes, like
the John Smiths, their descendants now; were
arrayed, in warm climates, in fragmentary
style of short dress; in.the middle regions in a
Highland garb, appropriately frilled or furred
and In the north, with canine material
heroic in quality, and modishly artistical-a
bark.
AS there is no period of history without its
John Smith, so there is no profession that does
not enrol no trade that does not contain no
occupation, from an otliceholders up to that of
an honest mans, that does not embrace his
name. Everywhere, on the sea and land; be-
tween every parallel of latitude, almost between
every pair OF sheets; at every pole and at every
pollDg-place; on all rivers and in every strait
at every point and even at Point-nO-point; on
the top, at the middle and bottom of every hill
enterprise, company board of directors and
job; in all churches, synagogues mosques, and
temples; preaching, singing, and listening;
talking all tongues, as well as curing
drying, and eating them; in prisons
poce-stations, pulpits, grand jury and other
boxes; to-day hung, tomorrow putting on his
black cap and sentencing the cuprit to the
| ropes-end, and the day following condemning a
pair to less hempen moose; in the pugilistic
ring or ecclesiastical fight; the actor on the
stage and at the same time the spectator in the
box, looking at himself personatng his own
character-ior every character is his every
where, and in everything, is found this jolly,
morose, lazy, active, sleepy, wakeful, lighting,
racific, coarse, refined fat, lean, tall, short,
blue-eyed. black-eyed John Smith.
| In truth, when we think of him as ubiquitous,
| omnscient, and Omnipresent doing all things in
| all places, carrying on all businesses, living on
all the real estate, owning at some time or other
all the personal property, pocketing all the
! ereenbacks whistling to all the dogs, riding all
! the horses, looking after all the poodle-dogs
| buy ing shoes and stockings for all the children
agreeable and dis0greeable we get into such a
| world of John Smiths, such nightmare OF johns,
! such a maelstrom of Smiths such gurgling,
! roaring, splitting splitting, laughing,
! screeching, ttillated, eXhilarated carnival and
! Fourth of July of John Smiths that we seem to
be In a room lined with mirrors that reflect only
John Smiths from all sides; indeed we almost
fancy ourselves a John Smith, our father and
mother n John Smith, and all our auntsi cousins,
uncles, nephews, brothers, and sisters ana even
| their cleIgymen, grocers, shoemakersi boot
blacks to be John Smiths, and that our last
note and the moTtgageOn our house are owned by
John Smith.-AHdnt{o Almanac.