The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1869-06-27
,.aauzne STAB AID GATEoL1c- aLEasxaaEE,
- : 80 ORLEANS. SUNDAY, 5UNE 70. 1889.
WET AND wrsDo1r.

crystal ghost.---A glass shade.
Note for dull people.-B sharp.
po.s;nS the time.---Going by n clock.
place for cheap boarding.-A lumber
yard. 49,, om.s. i. 1884,, &c
what occupation, does every body begin
life with Z A minors.
A blow at real estate.-When men are
ENGAGED breaking ground. -s 3es
One of the most striking things in the
world is CLOCK. eEa
The lady who knit her brows is now
davotipg her attention to pair OF socks.
There are two classes that catch at straws
drowning men and lovers of cobblers and
juleps.
A widow out West, removed from the
most Office, was only Quoted by the promise
of the new appOintee TO marry her.
ucoodness me ~ cried q nice old lady the
ether day, ssif the world does come to an
end next year, what will do for snuffT
An eminent artist lately painted snow.
storm SO naturally that he caught n bad
cold by sitting too near it with his coat
off.
Society is puzzled to know what kind of
Gifts are appropriate for "paper wedding.
Why not try stamps3 The '.happy couples"
would certainty oncf AiO opJCOstop'o'-
A distinguished physician recommended
aof mad dog. "Who would suppose" says
E1oblin, :" that the bark would cure the
sbite 7" -f.a.4... ,s-
Coleridge, the poet and philosopher, once
korr;ying at an inn, called out: "Waiter, do
Won dine here collectively OF individually !"
.Sir,n replied the knight of the napkin, 1--WE
dimes at six"
oc 1,,o 10 fflar
t.If YOU don't accept my chaAenge, shall
most YOU in the papers," $50 ahead, )" said
fhe other, az had rather fill a dozen papers
than one. coffin" z-==l =
sThey say cotton is declining" exclaimed
an old lady, as she removed her spectaeles,
and laid down her paper. 81 thought 80, ,
Size continued "for the last thread used
was very feeble" .-.
a The following inscription is actually to
be found in an ancient cemetery near
Ruckville, Eastern Massachusetts, -" In
memory of Jane Bent, who kicked up her
heels and away she went"
The Lopdon Rerie,D mentions the saying
of a cabman addressed to q missionary
whom he had ascertained to be fresh from
Japan-"Are they Christian people out
there, sir7 Do they take their drop o. gin
Of morning, as we do I"
At a recent trial in Wisconsin, the subject
sof controversy was o demijohn of whiskey,
(which was ordered to be brought into court
1.-The defendant was tried, and so was the
ghiskey-in other words, the whiskey was
Drunk, and SO was the jury.
King James l. was once entreated by his
bid nurse to make her son gentleman
a*sNae nae nurse" was the reply OF the
British Solomon: ''Tll. make him a lord an
Re wull, but it's beyond my power to make
him a gentleman" -r
"Ma, has Aunty Jane got bees In hel
mouth 2" sNo, my son; why do you ash
such question 1" "Because l heard Mr.
Briggs tell her that he would take thu
honey frem her lips and he was so long
kbout it I wondered he didn't get stung."
.I saw. Pompey," said one freedman t.
hnother, "dis chile has tried lots ob'gif
fares and things for prize, and nebbe
could draw any thing at all" 1" Well
Cesar, I'd wise you to try hand-cart; d
chances are tousand to one that you coul'
draw dat"
A humorous old man fell in with a
ignorant and rather impertinent youn
<convert who proceeded to inform the oil
gentleman, in very positive terms, that Ii
Gould never reach heaven unless he wa
born agaiR, " L have experienced tina
change, and now feel no anxiety" An
you have been born again y said his com
+'Well," said the old gentleman, eying hir
attentixely, 81 don't think 1t would hui
you to be born once more.'
A poor fellow having with difficulty pre-
cured an audience of the late Duke {
~ Newcastle, told his Grace he ealy came
solicit him for something towards h
support, and as they were of the sam
family, both being descended from Adam
he hoped he should not be refused. "Surel
not" said the Duke; "surely not. Here
penny for you; and if all the rest
your relations will give you as mucl
you'll be a richer man than am"
A valiant parson once, exhorting IL
soldiers to fight like lions, added in I'll
ardor of his enthusiasm, Reflect, N
brethren, that whatsoever falls to-day sui
to night in Paradise" Thunders of a.
plause followed the sentiment. The fig
began, the ranks wavered, and the parse
took to his heels, when a soldier, stoppir
him, reproachfully referred to the promise
supper in Paradise. "True my brothe
true" said the parson, but never tai
supper"