The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1850-1873, 1869-07-23
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

An object Of attraction-a magnet.
THE "bump of destructivene@" .
railway collision.
The most steadfast followers of our for
tunes-Our creditors.
THE man who was wrapped up in his
own thoughts had q very thin covering,
and took violent cold in consequence.
"JM," said one youngster to another,
on the Fourth" Jim lend me two cents,
will yer? got NJ 30 early that 1 spent
all my money before breakfast I didn't
think the day was going to be 20 long"
AN attorney, on being called to account
for having acted unprofessionally in taking
less than the usual fees from his client,
pleaded that he had taken all the man
had. He was thereupon honorably &C
quilted.
On the Goth ult, thirty.barrelwen of
lubricatiHg oil, worth $14 per barrel at
the well, was struck ON the Jamison
farm, about ono mile and half above
Tionests, Pa, At the depth Of only two
hundred feet. Great excitement prevailed,
and property advanced wonderfully.
A THREE year old boy of Pittsf1eld
clergyman, watching his mother making
biscuit one Sunday fcr tea, asked her if it
was not wicked to work on Sunday. OF
course she said it was, and the logical little
chap continued, "Oo'n catch it when 200
get to heavenr
TIE Sand wichs Islands must be . cheer
full place for horses and donkeys. Ac-
cording to correspondent these animals
are used d shark bait The pftnging
animal, whose bead is fastened to buoy,
attracts large shoals of the shOvel-nosed
monsters, which ravenously tear the
they are needless of the Kanakas in canoes,
who spear them.
THE Springfield RspxHiean says that it
is of q member of the Railway Commit
tee of the Massachusetts, Legislature,
Anno Donaini 1869, that this story Is told:
Bsipg on visit, With other members of.
the L. gislature, to Lowell, during the win
ter, they were called to see 3 beautiful
new steam engine in one of the factories.
The visitors, impressed, not only with the
beauty, but with the silent majesty of its
movements, walked slowly about it; or
stood in duiet admiration. rThs dist one
to SPEAK vas 5Gf hero. Tuning TO his
neighbor, he said Pretty, isn't it. Does
the thing go by water, or steams"
MANY years ago, in London, . clever
detective of the period hit upon . very
ingenious trick for trapping watch-pullers
He made himself up like Q respectable old
gentleman from the rural districts, very
conspicuous item of his outfit being an
immense bunch of seals that hung by .
ribbon from the ,Watch-pocket under his
waistband. In this Saias he "fho6ned"
about the streets, gaping ct everything;
and looking into shop windows 1t was
not long before he felt sharp ting at his
wstch-ribbon, followed by yell of agony.
The astute thiefcatcher had interpreted
among his seals Q lot of fab hooks, and 90
it came that he landed the first thief that
potncea Upon bis Bait
TIE Paris courts have been debating
the price of merchants nose. 4 mer-
chant was In the habit Of taking, every
Saturday evening, the train known as the
"husbands' train;"' to see his Yife and
olive hrsnshes at the seaside: 10 reach
the little village, it was ns6esssrt to travel
some miles by public vehicle, and ON one
occasion, owing to careless driving, the
coach was upset, and the merchant thrown
against 4 rock, afid :, thereby he lost his
nose. The court at Houen awarded him
900 francs damages. He appealed The
company alleged that, If he was young,
unmarried man, the loss of such an orna- |
ment would initiate against the chances
of q match; but, a. he was married, no |
crest harm had been done. The Court |
fulsd that married man had greater |
want of the perfect appehdaSe; snd in
creased the damages fvefold.
THERE was o "run" recently on Q
savings bank, and the directors
found that they had not money enough in
the vaults to meet the demand, and sent
to New York to get ffcsh sup
ply. They were afraid to get out ana in
structed the teller to count very slowly in
order to gain time The next fuse was 70
send one of the CLERKS into the line OF de-
and Set Tito q tow With the teller. He
did his work to Perfection, complained
that the money Was not Ill right COM
pelled the cashier to count It several times,
and made 20 much noise that policemen
had to be sent for. Tbs rest Of the de-
positors were amused ct the row, and for
rot that they were being detained. When
The messenger arrived with ffesh supply
Of money, the teller apologzed to tho
fictitious deposition, the quarrel was made
up, and the work of paying went on.
A ScorcHxAN and an Irishman hap
pened TO be journeying together through
! most interminable forest, and BY some
lost their way and wandered about
Ia q pftiable Condition for . while, when
hey fortunately came across . miserable
howell, which was deserted save BY lone
chicken. As this poor biped was the only
thing eatable to be obtained, they eager.
" Despatched and prepared Il for supper:
When laid before them, Pat concluded
nat Il was insufficient for the support OF
both himself and Sawney, and therefore .
proposition was made TO his companion |
nat they should spare the chicxen until
he next morning, and the one that had the
most pleasant dream should havethe chick
en-, which Was agreed 70. Inthe morning
Sawney told his dream. he thought an
gels were drawing him up 70 heaven In .
basket, and he wss never before 20 happy.
Upon concluding his dream. Pat ex-
claimed, Och, sure, and b jabsfs. aw
ye going. and thought 70 wouldn't come
back, % got up and ate the chicken my
vclfu