Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1869-10-15
PERsoNAL.

Cc5aH--Ihs sheet-AnchOr.
If a young lady bids you take heart,
does it mean that you can take hers +?
Don't sleep with your coat on, or its
nap and yours win be taken together.
How strange we should hate any
thing that annoys, and yet love an
oyster
Il is said-ironicaIly peFhaps-that
b1acksmiths forge and steel every day.
Maxim for the Iazy-No farmer can
ploW a field by turningit over in his
mind.-Fun.
a piece of work no PRINTER ever yet
turned up his nose at-the proof of
he pudding.
s'Money is very tight" said a thief
who was trying TO break open bank
vault.
pigs be IN their element 10 the trough |
of the sea
Lucretia Mott has been slowly dying |
for about ssYenty-six years.
What difference it makes whether
you put DR.. before or after mans
name.
squib, speaking financially, says it
was this last eanels hair for Mrs. s.
which broke his back.
"Have you ever been baptized, Mich
ael 2'' NO, sir, not as 1 knows on,
but I've been waxtnated."
When Patrick first tried peaches, he
said he liked the flavor, but the seeds
lay hard on his stomach.
Chief Justice Chase is said to have
invested SO, GOO in a tract of land, with
a fine residence, just outside of Wash
iu2ton.
can't it wicked to rob this hen-roost,
Jim ?'' "Ah Bob, that's great NOR
al question. land down t'ather pull
let"
Why are all washerwomen great
travellers Because they are continu-
ally crossing the liDc and running from
pole to pole.
Mamma mamma - helIowed the
nigel of the hnuse hold from the top OF
-, S \, mad. and Hannah
"Come out here and I'll lick the
whole OF youY said an urchin 70 some
sticks fpeppermint-eaRdy in a eonfec-
toners window.
Mrs. PaTtington, in illustration of
the prOYerb, - A soft answer tuFneth
away wrath, +" says "that it is better to
speak paragoricatiY of person than
to be all the time filnging epiiaphs at
him"
An Old writer gives the following as
the amount of sleep demanded
Mature requires five
Custom gives seven
LaZiuess takes nine
And wiekeduess eleven.
Adandy on shore is disgusting to
many people, but y swell OF the sea
sicEens every body.
A young man named Turn married a
cousin of the same name, on The plea
that.'0ne good Turn deserved anoth-'
err
"Did you know I was there +? said
the bellows to the fire. "Oh yes, I al
ways contrfve to set wind Of you" was
the reply,
s'The woman quest ou''-What shall
get for a fall bonnet? The "man
questiOn''-Where shall / get money
enough to pay for it
''Pompey, de eorn's up" .-De corn
upi Why, 1 only planted it yesterdayr'
7 know dat but do hogs got in last
night, and guy it lift.2
'tDon't trouble yourself to stretch
your mouth any wider, ''said dentist
~ AtH AfftsANAAR AAlguAl0 W EtALO QUIZ
side to draw your tooth.''
An Irishman who was drinking the
health of a bishop, gave this toast ::
May your Reverence live to eat the
old hen that crows over your grave"
A Judge and a lawyer we're CONVEX
sing about the doctrine of transmigra-
ton of the souls Of men into animals.
Now, said the Judge, Suppose you
and Il fT1rTpH a IN
ass, which would you prefer to be ?''
"Fhe ass, to be sure, - rel piled the law
yer. why ?'' asked the Judge. 'fBs-
cause was the reply Il have heard of
an ass being judge but Of horse, new
Were I court-plaster, would be,
A patch upon her lip,
And spend my life in ecstasy,
And sip, and sip, and sip!
Were a pair of spectaeles,
how dearly would prize
A sttuation on her nose,
TO gaze into her eyes I
Josh Billings says ttAIaclxrel inhal-
it the sea, generally but those which
iOhabit the grocery alwas taste to me
as though they had been faIted on salt.
They want a deal Of freshening before
they're eatin', and also afterwards. If ]
kin have plenty Of mackrel fur brek-
fast, I can generally make the other
two meafs cat OF water"
ssIf there is any body under the can
ister of heaven that have in utter ex-
crescence,'' said Mrs. PartingtOn, ait Is
the sianderer, going about like boy
constrictor, circulating his calomel up
on honest folks"
A Wall street speeniator, returning
home, on Saturday evening, in no en-
Al
the result of his operations to the fami
ly group "No more silk dresses thi,
winter, my dear no more balls and
parties no more Opera-bo1es and
then warming with his subject, 'nC
more internal winnings and diBings, and
no moro ID nonsense of any sort,
Matilda" Surely, the most untnitfated
would have known thai the man was a
bedr.-E New York Commercial Adver-
tiser.
"Tbis old body is nearly worn out y
Such WIS the remark of the lannented
Judge COven, who, in the midst OF an
argument which proved to be his last
sank exhausted into his seat. A duty
done, work finished, body worn on
in the service of his God and his coun.
try. To the numerous warm personn-
friends of this kind, patient, gentle
old man, this touching little ineiden
will recall the many favors done, th,
many kind and cheering words of en-
ragemeut which revived their droop
ing spirits and strengthened their fal
tertHg resolutions r Cincinnati Caa'o1'
eeIe.
The Mont Cents Railway is making
good progress. The mountain has beel
penetrated by the tunnel to the dis
taaee Of six and a quarter miles TIL
remaining distance to be tunneIied
about one mile. Tie progress has al
ways seen greaferOn the southern side
where the work was begun and i'm
proved machinery first employed. Hal
an equal advance been made at tn
ofhnr end the tunnel wOuld have beel