The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1869-10-16
Love.
BY P. o. MUDKLURK.


nented, writes:
My dear Mudklurk-T am in love,
and it makes me feel so funny. | feel
just girl baby-so weak, so delicate.
When in the presence of my affection
object, l feel as thin as ether-as VIOLA
tile as turpentine. A zephyr could
blow me away the trembling Of low,
soft note could shiver me TO atoms. l
don't sleep much of nights, neither do
| get entirely awake during the dav
In fact. I'm in a half oblivious, half
unconscious, dreamy state all the time.
l feel incapable of doing mean action
I've got lots of enemies, bnt don't feel
mad at them. as / formerly did. My
heart beats regular, but has way of
getting into my throat when think of
her love; and as this thinking is al
ways going on, my heart is never in
the right place. want to move far
away from the haants of men. where l
will see no one but my souls delight
where / can hear nothing but the moan
of the sea, the singing of birds, and the
voice of my charmer. A vine-cla cot
tage thousand miles from civilization
comes nearer filling my idea of Para
disc, than anything else. Now, as a
friend, tell me why have such feelings.
What is love? Have you ever had it,
or felt it! have consulted my die
tionary thousand times, but it gives
no satisfactory definition"
The same "old old story" Perhaps
your feelings have been experienced
by thousand of others before you were
born, because there have been fools
ever since the world began. Yes. we
have been in love twenty times. At
one time, we loved no less than eleven
glrls at once, but we didn't feel as if
we shoald like to emigrate any further
from the "haunts of men than to
Utah. Love in cottage" is all very
nice in theory and pnetry. but in prac-
, tice and prose it is far different. Ifyou
can screw your mind down from its
ethereal state for few moments, con-
slider the following which is given free
gratis: Love is only poetical in the
mind. Its practice requires physical
labor. To prove this We have only to
refer you to every household in the
United States. In every one of these
we see from one to a dozen children
who have to be supported. These
. children are the result or practice OF
love. lfyou love in this way you must
work No other kind Of 10 yiug is law
full, because how are you to benefit tie
world or yourself by remaining in a
semi oblivious, half demented state all
your life Love was made for the
purpose of peopling the earth; these
people at first are as helpless as tur-
tie on its back; until they become old
enough to support themselves, some
? body else has to do it for them. Imag
inc yourself in ''vine-clad cottage
far away from civilization. In the first
place you can't get that far away un-
less you move out on the Pacific Rail
Road. Indians are plenty out there,
, you know. Instead of the 'moauing
sea- you hear the growing of wolves ;,
instead of singing birds and the
> voice of your souls delight" you
| hear the war whoop Of the red skins,
and SO on, ad minimum. We don't
like cottages covered with vines In the
second place, for vines are such ever
lasting snake harbors. We don't like
EN- in the third place, because it costs
too much to build houses TO have them
rotted down every year or two. Vines
keep everything about them damp, and
this results in chills and fever. Now
tell me, if you can what you would do
for doctor in the case of shake" in
: your family, if you lived a thousand
miles in the country You'd better
take velocipede with you when you
start.
Fourthly. how are you going to edu-
cate your children? You can't do it
Yourself, as you have to work your
clearing. Your wife can't do it, as
: she has to cook and keep the house in
order. They cannot learn themselves,
as that is an impossibiity, so what is to
become of them! You see your posi-
ton is preposterous. A to living up
in the sky among amber tinted clouds
we have nothing to say. Ballooning
is dangerous work. Clouds, as a gen
eral thing, are chilly, and liable to give
a very bad cold. In case of this
: kind you would be apt to become dis
gusted with the ''voice Of your charm
err when she addressed you in Ian
guage as follows; Dear, throw oud
sub orc ballast"
We like love in a solid brick-house
in the city, or even ia the country when
there are neighbours (pho don { borrow)
in abundance. We have given YOU
our idea IF love. How it is generated.
or whence it cometh. we know not. nor
10 W. care so long as it is a sensible
kind. The best thing in the world to
cure wild, mad. passionate, all-consum-
ing. tremendously overpowering feel
ing. enormously called love by you, is
to marry the object Of your affections.
settle down to quiet life. love your
: wife. attend to your duties as a man,
| ,.dupata yuuP chill ron unt f,.o.otk;,, :.