Democratic enquirer. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1867-1873, 1869-02-10
SelrttrO nIisfelIang.
NEW UNCOMMERCIAL SAMPLES
A LITTLE DINNER IN AN HOUR,
BY CHARLES pIcKENs.

1t fell out on day in this last autumn
that had to 90 down from London 10 q
place of seaside resort, on nm hours busi.
ness, accompanied by my esteemed friend
Bullinch. Let the place of seaside resort,
be for the nonce, called Namelesston,
had been lettering about Paris IN very
hot weather, pleasantly bTeakiastlng IN the
open air in the garden Of tie PAlais Royal
or the Tuileries, pleasantly dining in the
open air in the Elysian Fields, pleasantly
taking my cigar and lemonade in the open
air on the Italian Boulevard towards the
small hours after midnight. Bullhnch-an
excellent man of busness-had summoned
me back across the Channel TO transact this
said hours business at Namslesston, and
thus it fell out that Bullfnch and were in
railway carriage together on our way to
Namelesston, each with his return ticket IN
his waistcoat pocket
Says Bull6nCh: Il have proposal to
make. Let us dine at the TenIeraire,
asked Bullfnch, Did he recommend the
TemeraiTe? Inasmuch aG | had not been
rated on the books of the Temorrire for
many years,
Bullfnch declined to accept the lespon-
sibility Of recommending tho Ieneraire,
but on the whole was rather gRrguine about
il. He seemed to remember" Dullfnch
said that he had dined well Gbero. A plain
dinner, but good. Certainly not like Pa.
risian dinner (here Bullfinch obviously be-
became the prey of want of confidence but
OF its kind very fair
Iappealed to Bullfnch's intimate knowl-
edge Of my wants and ways to decide wheth-
er was usually ready to be pleased with
any dinner, or-for the matter Of that
with anything that was fair Of its kind and
really what it claimed TO be- Bullhnch do
ing me the honor to respond in the affirm
ative, l agreed to ship myself as an Able
Trencherman on board the Temeraire.
"Now, our plan shall be this" says Bull
inch, with his forefnger at his nose. "As
soon as we get to Namelesston, wen drive
straight to the Temeraire, and order lit
tie dinner in an hour, And as We shall not
have more than enough time in which to
dispose of it comfortably, what do you say
to giving the house the best opportunities
of serving it hot and quickly by dining in
the coffee-roomY"
What / had to say was, Certainly Bull
finch (who is by nature of hopeful con-
ElllullUul lu0u OCkuB w bubblO VI kltbh
geese. But / checked him in that Falsta-
tian vein, urging considerations Of time
and cookery.
In due sequence of events we drove up
to the Temeraire and alighted. A youth in
livery received us on the doorstep. Looks
well, said Bullfnch, cOnhdentially. And
then aloud, "Coffee-room"
The youth in livery (now perceived to be
mouldy) conducted us to the desired hav-
en-, and was enjoined by BulGnch 10 send
the waiter at once, as we wished to order a
little dinner in an hour Then Bullfnch
and waited for the waiter until, the wait
er continuing to wait in some unknown and
invisible sphere ofactien, we rang for the
waiter, which ring produced the waiter,
who announced himself as not the waiter
who ought to wait upon rs, and who didn I
wait moment longer.
SO Bullhnch approached the cofise-room
door, and melodDusly pitching his voice
into q bar where two young ladies were
keeping the books Of the Yemerire. apo.
logehcally explained that we wished TO or,
der little dinner in an hour, and that We
were debarred from the execution Of oul
inoffensive purpose by consignment 10 soil
tude
Hereupon one of the young ladies rang q
bell which Reproduced at the bar this
time-,the waiter who was not the waitel
who ought TO wait upon us; that eXtraordi
nary man, whose life seemed consumed il
waiting upon people to say that he wouldn'
wait upon them, repeated his former pro
test with great indignation, aud retired
Bullinch with fallen countenance, wa
about to say to mo This won't do, " wher
the waiter who ought to wait upon US lef
OF keeping us waiting at last Waiter,
said Bullhnch, piteously, I'VE have been
long time waiting" The waiter who ougL
to wait upon us laid the blame upon th,
waiter who ought not to wait upon ~, auC
said it was all that waters fault.
I'VE wish, said Bullfnch, much depres
sed, Ito order little dinner in an hour
What can we have2'
What would you like to have, gentle
men1"
Bull6nch, with extreme mournfulness {
speech and action, and with forlom oil
hy.blown bill of fare In his hand which th
waiter had given him, and which was
sort Of general manuscript Index 10 an
CookeTy-Book you please, moved the pr,
vious question.
We could have mock. turtle soup, sol
curry, and roast duck. Agreed. At tn
table by this window. Eunctually in O
hour.
/ had been feigning took out Of this vii
dow; but had been taking notes of II
crumbs on all the tables the dirty tabl
cloths, the stuffy, soupy, airless atmo
phere, the stale leavings everywhere abou
the deep gloom Of the waiter who ought
wait upon us, and the Btomachache wit
which lonely traveller ut distant table
the corner was too evidently aWicted.
now pointed out TO Bun6nch the nlarmir
circumstance that this traveller had dine,
We hurriedly debated whether, wtho,
infringement of good breeding, we coul
ask him TO disclose II he had part0ken
mock-turtle, sole, curry, or roast duckI v
decided that the thing could not be polite
done, and that we had set our own stomach
on cast, and they must stand the ha2al
Of the die.
Ihold phrenology, within certain limit
10 be true; am much OF the Same min
M TO the subtler expressions of the hant
1 hold physiogomyto be infallible thoug
all those sciences demand rare qualities
the student. But also hold that there
no more certain index 10 personal charact
er than the condition Of set Of casters
70 the character OF any hotel. Knowing
and having often tested this theory ofmine
BullAnch resigned himself 10 the worst
when, laying aside any remaining veil o