Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1869-12-02
ONE GLASS TOO MUCH.
Or, the Wifs's Might Cap.

than mile from the post Office in this
city, met some northern friends with
southern principles, the other evening,
and in extending to them the hospital
tiles of the Crescent City," visited so
many of our princely saloons and
marble Halls" imbibing spiritual
consultations as they journeyed, that
when he left them at their hotel, at
the midnight hour, he felt, decidedly
felt, that he had "a brick in his hat"
Now he has wife, an amiable, ac-
complished and beautiful lady, who
loves him devotedly, and finds but one
fault with him. That is his too fire.
quent visits to the places where those
bricks" are obtained.
After leaving his friends, Mr..
paused moment, took his bearings,
and having shaped his course, on the
principle that continual angles meet,
made sail for home. In due course of
time he arrived there. and was not
very much astonished, but rather
frightened to find his worthy lady sit
ting up for him. She always does =
She smiled when he came in. That al
so, she does.
GLOW are you my dear E?" she
said, ''you staid out so late that fear
ed you had been taken sick :"
"Hic-ain't sick, wife--b-but don't
you think Pm a little Tight"
"a rery little perhaps, my dear
but that is nOthing-you have so
many friends, as you say, you must
join them in glass once in while!'
"Wife, you're too good-th' the
truth is, Pm id d-drnnkl"
"Oh, no, indeed, my dear-I'm
sure that even another glass wouldn't
hurt You Now, suppose you take
glass of Scotch ale with me, just as
night cap. dear
"You are too kipd, my dear-I
know I'm d-drunkv'
ooh, no, only julep too much,
loye-that's allt'
Observation-Disclosures makes
such stiff uns!"
"Well-take a glass of ale at any
rate it can't hurt you, dear, / want
one before retire"
The lady hastened to open bottle,
and as she placed two tumblers before
her on the sideboard she put in one a
very powerful emetic Filling the
glass with foaming ale she handed one
to her husband.
Suspicion came clouded upon his
mind. She never had been so kind |
when he was drunk. He looked at the
glass, raised it TO his lips, then hesi-
tated
"Dear, w-wont you just taste mine
to make it sweet-sweeter," said he.
Certainly, love!" taking a mouth
ful, which she was careful not to swal-
low.
Suspicion vanished; SO did the ale,
emetic and all, down the throat of the
satisfied husband. After splitting ont
the taste, the lady finished her glass,
but seemed in no hurry to retire.
She fixed tub of water before an
easy chair, as if she intended to bathe
her beautiful feet therein. But small
as were those feet there was not water
enough in the tub to cover them. Phe
husband began to feel, and wanted to
retire.
"Wait only few minutes, dear"
said his loving spouse; 81 want to
read the Star Spangied Banner which |
come this afternoon.
A few minutes only elapsed, and
then, and then-oh ye gods and Dan
o. lake what time? The husband |
was placed in an easy chair. He be-
gun to understand why the tub was
there, he soon found what allied him.
Suffice it to say, that when he arose
from. the chair, the brick had left his
hat. 1t hasn't been there since. He
SAYS he'll never drink another lulep;
he can't bear Scotch ale, but he is
death ON lemonadei He loves his wife
better than ever.
Reader, this is a truthful story
Profit by the moral.