The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1869-10-09
5osh Biiiinss Fapsrs-rns Hofnss.

SsK Biiiisss TspsTs-Tns Hcsnss.
-'ThS h6fnsBt tiso Gn iinfiA mf6sl ska69Ssf.
sudden IN his imprsshuhs and 'hasty in
his conclusion, OF end. -, ,,114S 49,
His natrsl disposishen In sswarua StSai
botween red'pepper in the pod and fusil
OIL, and his moral bias liz ''git out Of mi
way: ~ '3
They hav long. black boldly, divided
IN the middle by waist spot, but their
phisikal importance lays at the terminus
of their suburb, in the shape oy a
iavelin.
This javelin il alwuz loaded, and stands
ready to unload at minnit's warning,
and enters man az still az thought, az
spry aziitening and az full ov melankolly
NJ the toothake.
Hornets never argy a case; they settle
awl ov their differences ov opinyun by
letting their javelin fly, and are az GER
tain to hit az mule il.
This testy kritter lives in congrega.
tlons numbering about 100 souls, but
whether they are male or female, or con.
servative, or matched in bonds of we'd
lock, or whether they are Mormons, and
a good many ov them king together and
keep one husband to save expense. I
don't kno nor don't care.
never hav examined their habits
much, never konsidercd it healthy.
Hornets bid their nests wherever they
take noshun to. and seldom are dis
turbed, for what would it profit q man
tew kill 80 hornets and hav the one hun
dredth one hit him with his javelin?
They bid their nests ov paper, with
out emmy windows to them or back doors.
They hnv but one place ov admission,
and the nest il the shape ov IN over
grown pineapple, and il cut up into lust
as menny bedrooms rs their liz hor-
nets.
1t IL very simple to make O hornets
nest If yu kan, but will wager ennv
man 800 dollars he kant bid one that he
could sell to hornet for half price.
Hornets are az bizzy az their second
couzzins, tho bee, but what they are
about the Lord only knows; they don't
lay up emmy honey, nor emmy money;
they seem to be bizzy only jist for the
sake of working all the time; they are al
wus IN as mutch of hurry az tho they
waz going for dokter.
=! suppose this uneazy world would
grind around on its azle-iree onst in "a
hours, even If thare want emmy hornets,
put hornets must be good for sum-
thing, but kant think now what it liz.
Ihare haint been bug made yet in
valn, nor one that wanta good job. thare
lz ever lots of human men lofing around
blacksmith shops, and cider mills. ali
over the country, that don't seem to be
necessary for anything but to beg plug
tobacco and swear, aud steal water
melons, but yu let the cholera ont once.
and then yu will soc the wisdom of hay-
ing Jist sich men laying around; they
help count
Next tew the cockroach, who stands
tew the head, the hornet haz got the
most waste stummuk, in reference tew
the rest of hiz boldly, than enny ov the
insek populashun, and here il another
mystery; what on 'arth duz q hornet
want SO mutch reserved corps for?
hav llst thought-tew carry hiz jave-
lin In; thus, yu see, the more we disko-
yer about things the more we are apt to
know.
1t IL always good purchase tew pay
out our last surviving dollar for wisdum.
and wisdum IL like the MYSTERIOUS hens
egg, 1T amt laid in yure hand, but il
laid away under the barn, and VII have
got tew seerch for it.
The hornet liz an unshoshall kuss. he
IL more naughty than he is proud, he iz
thoroughbred bug, but his breeding
and refinement has made him like sum
other folk I know ov, dissatisfied with
himself and everybody else, too much
good breeding ackts this way sometimes.
Hornets are long ived-I kant state
jist how long their lives are, but 1 know
from instinkt and observation that enny
critter, be he bug or be he devil, who il
mad all the time, and stings every good
chance he can git generally out.lives all
his nabers.
The only good way tew git Mt the
exact fitting weight ov the hornet il tew
tutch him, let him hit yu once with his
javelin, and yu will be willing tew testify
in court that sumbody run u one tined
pitchfork into yer; and az for grit, I will
state, for the iinformashun ov thoze who
haven't had chance tew lay in their
vermin wisdum az freely az I hav, that
one single hornet. who feels we'll, will
brake up large camp meeting.
What the hornets do for amuzement
liz another question I kant answer. but
sum ov the best read and heaviest think
ers amung the naturalists saw thew bay
target excursions, and heave their iave-
lins at mark; but I don't imbibe This
asSorshun raw for noyor -, -.