The Valley Virginian. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1865-1895, 1869-05-27

very red in the face, and looked as happy al
if he had just heard that his grandfather
was dead, and had willed him half million
After moment he partially subsidized and
went back to the old subject.
"What do you say to taking charge of tho
lady? p
swallowed down the lump in my throat
and answered bravely:
"I'll do it, Jashcr. l suppose, if she's
the reasonable person you represent her t.
be, that she'll be expecting me to DO the
agreeable to her ALI shall have to sec
after will be her luggage, and getting hel
something to eat 2"
EYES," said Jasher, in such peculiar tone
that l could not tell whether the fellow was
ridiculing me or not. Call woman wants
is to have her baggage seen after, and some
victuals to eat now and then"
Jasher took his leave, promising to be al
the station in good season, with my travelling
companion.
need not tell the reader how blue [ felt
over the arrangement to which l had con.
sentcd. wanted to oblige my friend, but
had much rather he had asked me to indorse
his note for ten thousand
Twas at the depot early. IF there is any
thing hate, it is being hurried on my way
to depot, Hurrylng destroys mans dig
nifty, and it wits his collar, especially if he
wears paper; and it generally makes him
sweat, and then his hat produces a red streak
on his forehead /; and he is apt to get out Of
breadth, and out Of temper, also. [ bought
my tickets, and paced the platform impatieutly
I wished Jasher would come. felt some
curiosity to see the lady who was to be my
travelling companion. Nothing more than a
natural feeling, you know.
Time wore on-the first bell struck, and
still he did not arrive. I was nearly deter
mined to go on board the cars; for am one
Of those men who have an aversion to the
rush for seats at the last minute | have no
special ambition to get my name into the news
papers, by falling between the cars some day
in getting into them, and having my legs cut
off, OF my head crushed. Not at all!
just as | was going on board, Jasher came,
hot, and Hurried, and breathless. He had a
lady on his arm whom he presented to me-
I understood the name, Mrs. Graves, or
Gaines, I could not tell which, Jasher was
so out of breadth that he could not articulate
very plainly. She was rather small woman,
for which | was thankful for if there is any
thing deprecate it is woman OF the Anna
zonian mould It is too much Of a good
thing.
[ saw in the newspaper the other day, that
the most disagrceable way women have with
them is to aoeigh two hundred! And the ge-
Mus who wrote that paragraph is wise. 1t IS
truth, double distilled and boiled down.
Mrs. Graves wore gray travelling suit,
just short enough to show her charming little
foot; and a small foot was always my admir-
alton, Notwithstanding | was woman hater !!
Her dress was trimmed in black, and she had
on brown hat with scarlet rose in front,
and blue vail all over her head and face
'sHomcly as sin y said [ to myself; "pret-
ty women never wear vails-that is, thick
ones"
Jasher got the baggage checked and the
tickets bought. These were transferred to me,
together with the neatly gloyed hand Of Mrs.
Graves, and escorted her into a car. It was
not very crowded and I gave her seat just in
front Of mine, for I had decided that would
not sit on the same sofa with her. | did not
care to be quite SO near woman as that !; for
if [ did she would expect me to talk to her,
and tell her the names Of the stations, and buy
her lady's books, and oranges and photographs
and peanuts, when the vendors went through
the cars Not that [ 'grudged the money, but
YOU see I did not want to be agreeable to any
woman. rs
I had Just got myself comfortably fixed, with
- q q
my ovcrcoat on the seat beside me. and my
newspaper spread out, when in sailed woman
full six feet high, and stout in proportion,
with her arms full Of a poodle, a bandbox, a
big paper parcel, satchel, and pot of YER
benas And before / could lift hand or voice
to prevent her, she had pumped herself down
beside me, bundles and all, spread her stiff
hoped petticoat over my knees, and set her
bapdbox and parcel into my lap with the re-
mark
sHere, mister, just you hold them things.
I've got the vcrbenas and Pet to take care of,
and that's enough for me. Dear mel can't
you set over little? I'm awfully crowded p
Twas on the point of dropping her luggage,
stepping unceremoniously over her, and ia
king seat with Mrs. Graves; but Just as |
was rising for that purpose, nice-looklng
young gentleman, with curly black hair en-
tered the car, laid his daintily glovcd hand
on the back Of her seat, and asked the cues
ton
us this seat engaged, madam"
"No, sir" replied the sweetest voice. had
G or heard; audi have finc ear for music.
.'May sit here 7" as defercntially as if he
was asking sovereign to spare his life.
eff you please" said she. And | could
have trottled him as he sat down beside her
his arm touching her shoulder, and his hand
some face bent down to talk to her. could
not help feeling angry with him; but then, OF
course, it was not from any special interest in
her, for hated the sex, but because he had
SO much better seat than had. For my
partner smellcd Of musk and onions; and one
of these orders alone is bad enough, but COM
bine them, and it is dreadful!
The curly haired fellow made himself in
tenscly agreeable to her. He bought a comic
paper and they laughed over it together, and
by and by he bought popped corn, and they
ate that together, was fairly boiling with
rage, and when Mrs. Poodle addressed me a
question, / answered her SO sharply that the
poodle barked and made snap at my elbow
Sagacious little c1ss he must have known
that had murder in my heart.
After while we came to stopping place.
The curly haired fellow put his shawl over
the back of the scat to keep his place for him,
L H. lad tho