Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1869-04-08
Donnybro0k Fair I'm Congress.
WASHINGTON, Feb. IL.

WASHlN0TOS, feo. III.
MIsTHUR EDpITHUR.-Its the swatest
site since Donny brook I've sin. Blur-au-
ages but me fingers is itchen' fur a shtick
an head to crack this blissid mint.
wuz in Congress yesterday, fur q da-
clint sort ov a bye tould me twuz betther
that ratpit rumtime-, an sez he wild q
wink, "it's fun wen be havin,' I'm think
in''
There wuz a hape av gintlemin sittin'
about, wild McWade a satid on a high
chare, an ,Coldfaks be his side, an sum
gintlemin wuz openin' letthurs an radin'
thin.
IAN where's the fun 2" sez to me
frind.
How'd yer bother" sez he; "the funis
a cummin prizintly.'
Jist then wun av the gintlemin sez,
Its letthur from Georgy that's here"
Il object TO the radin',' sez OButler.
And why, I'd lide 10 know Z" SEE Nc
Wade.
It me privilege TO object" sez o'But-
tier.
"An' be this and be that sez McWade
but the letthur must be rade fur all av
yez.'
With that o'Butler sthepped TO the fore,
wild his shillaley undhir has arm an took
off his cabeen an dhrapped il into the
iure. "Will any gentlemin be doin me
the favur av putin his foot an that Z" sez
be, wild wan eye sot an McWade, an the
other yowlin' around Arthur a fut that
showed intinshans ay dom that same.
Maybe its myself that'l aceomydate
yez." sez McWade.
''Be the pipper, an it, yerself I'm man
in" sez y Butler, rowlin up his sleeves,
sphittIn' in h.z ,fisht, am takIn' hoult av
his shillaley.
MAYBE I'll nat tlin," seq McWade,
But I'll consult Wild me friends fust, sez
he An wild that, the McWade fackshun
wint out.
The toihur byes gathered around o'But-
ler, an it, hape of trubble there wuz.
sum advised him 10 be kapin hiz cabeen
an hiz head or it, cracked hiz shubll wud
be. Othurs sed More power 10 the Mas
sychu,etts bye, an that iU- nat fur want
ay friendly sbiIlaley he'd be sint 10
grass Wid that the McWade party com
back. an fax its up there backs wuz
"Its a caubeen an the fiure I'm looking
fur sez McWade.
"Au' bedad. there il liz, thin," ser O'But-
Ter. tiingin IL ia biz face.
"An' there's nae tut,' sez McWade,
shfompin' an the hat sazin hls bat Nv
wud.
Bexorra but it nnz swate 10 me sowl 10
hear the "Hurroo" O'Butler guy thin.
az he sint his shillairy in the air an
Jumped up arfter IT. Its fite IL it ]" seq
he. '-Shtind aft byes, and give me room
fur me arrum-.
"Gloory. bnt how the byes wint at it
O'Butier's shillai.y wuz singing round
McWade'7 ears like tay kettle ON d hot
shtoye an New AIDES bit ay wud whscked
an O'Burler's shiny head like haekmans
whip ala n lame hare when lts IA wet lite
Az a full house AT the opery. lrr not IN
fllsh an Dlud to lee sthapdIbg IL, an' IN a
wink 1t wuz every bye had hiz shiilaley
ont srom his coat tail from under his
arrum. an the div.rsbion ~uz az lively
az Donny brook Far wid the la-Lt drsp
av the crathur empthied aI4 diyil q bat
else but fitin' lett Ia be enjed. Bad scran
T., ,h. bad me- / meself. that
should be layIn,g bat ay rthIck bebint
whin its wanIIn' It / ain. It's the very
swatest bIt of dIyershuu slnse i lett the
old sod that I'm "a IO-in.'
The % Butler byes wuZ dhriyin' the Nc
Wades. and McWade's he'd wuz maxim
inthimit ackwinthinse Wild the botanical
crathur ay OButler'- shillaley, whin Cold
facks, that had bin sitfIn' az aisy az IL
twuz Quaker meetin', suddenly whip
ped out shillealey, an guv OButler a
whaeh that dhTapped hiIn in bis chare
like load av dhiTt- That indid the
sbindy, the McWade fack-hun wint aft
in triumph Wild the O'Builers sbakin
their shillalies at Thin an swearin' VIM
ginse.
Thin O'Butler jumped up an' wint fur
Cnldiaks. an Coldiaks Jumped down an
wint for OButler' an all the luther byes
shpit ia their fishtr, gud TUX howlt ay
their shillaleys, 20 hav d crack at wah or
t'oihur Of them. but twuz hungry an
dhry they all Nnz an the shindy was
put off tail the morrA. BegoTra, but fun
ahead, an I'm goin' Mid me shlllaley, ats
IN. luck IT, may be Ia gIt chance ia.
BE me sowl, If this fashun the de-
bathin' L., Ill be Arthur LAWN the whisky
in-Iinthnr hizness foi rnm won il-e. an
boz runnin for Congris-. There's munney
in the inspictbur biznes-, bnt there's shin
diess in Congress. an it, plizure afore
profit amy day.
DEaNIs oFLAHERTY.
A MODEL OFFICE BEGGING LETTER
A good example of the proper thing may
be found ia the following note, which
member Of Congress has received from one
Of his constituents, aud the publication Of
which he has permitted in the Cincinnati
Commercial:
Il have been thinking whether il would
not be better for my health for me 10 go
out of the country. and have concluded
10 ask for one Of the following places
The Consulate at London. OF
Liverpool, or
Paris. or
Havre, OF
Cuba,
and leave IL TO yon 20 select, ~ You have
better opportunities to judge. j would
like il Won would advise me a few days
before the appointment i made, 20 that
can arrange my business"
The writer of this epistle llas a certain
.fatfootednes-" of style which oommends
him TO the unprejudieed mind. Assured
ly he stands a much better chance of sue
cess than the writer of another communi-
cation received by the same Congressman
from an office-seeker, which consisted of
eighteen mortal foolscap pages, closely
written, and which be desired should be
read To General Grant