The Emporia news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1859-1881, 1869-03-19

At last he seized one, and was about
seating his wife, when an official came
at him, demanding the chair. The poor
1nanzexplained, bat the fellow replied
he had his oraers-the chairs we're need
ed for another purpose. The husband
babe his wife sit down, and then said
Now, if you take that chair, you
must take it from under my wife, and
hardly think that will be healthy pro-
ceeding.s
Yoa can gain your purpose in that
way exclaimed the fellow, white with
rage, sfbut if your wife is sick you had
bsbleF take her home" go s.
s''EYcn are an fnsofent hound roared
the husband, .-and if you will give me
your address I'll smash your dirty mouth
tomorrow. when there are no women
to protect you.
L was told that the scene in the sup
per room beggareI description. The
doorsswere opelfed TO thelenflre crowd.
and if two minutes the rooms were
packed to stsffocatioI. To eat was
impossible. But to stir up the temper
and destroy dresses was the rule.
The long trails of rich material suf-
fered ut every step. While trying to
get to the supper room felt for some
time under my feet what seemed to be
aTsoft carpet. / found in a few minutes
that it. was the trail of lady some dis
lance IA advance. What guys women
can make of themselves when they try.
/ saw. some youthful female donkeys
with their heads plastered over with
powder and pomatum. as if their dear
little selves had terminated in an apple
Tlunpling.
When at last, tired and disguised, we
sought the dressing rooms for Oul
wraps, found that we were pinned to
the place for two days. Fortunately,
very improperly, found their cloaks
and. then assembled for mine. found
acrew actually fighting in the hall above
At the hole in the door of the cloak
room an idiotic face made mouths at us
in the most exasperating manner. Long
lines were formed by the police, and
scarcely formed before broken up.
happened to get near my friend, the
Professor
at is my opinion" he cried, ''that we
will be here all night, l do not see thai
struggling outside expedites work in.
side. cannot go home without my gar
ments. / believe l can insert my body
in that aperture with your assistance"
$50 it, Professor" said /, and the Pro
fessor made dive. l seized him by thu
| legs. Two stout men assisted, and after
brief struggle, in which the Professor
| lost one of his coat tails and broke hi
spectacles, We shot him through. Blu
alas and alack the Professor is dread
fully near sighted, and losing his glasses
he lost his eyes. left him moping abOu
in the most disordered manner.
| descending the stairs, / encountered
| Mr.. Horace Greeley. He was sitting OIL
a step, and looked as dismal as Mariu
| amid the ruins of the Carthage Hotel.
What is the matter, Mr.. Greeley 2"
inquired.
II have. lost my hat in that cursed
room of idiots"
mot your old white hiatt"
Eyes, my old white hat, and with j
my overcoat. 1t is lamentable that TIL
rebels did not take this d-n town ant
burn it to ashes. They showed thei
spite by not doing SO. 1t is an inferna
sink-hole of iniquity, depending for it
miserable existence on the government.
l left the venerable philosopher la
menting. What an extraordinary fact
was that he lost his old white hat. ha
an idea, in common with the pensiv
public, that it could not be lost. ! be
lieved he could not sell it if he were t
try. He could not give it or throw
away, and here it was lost in cloa
room. 9.-'
This event impressed me deeply.
went home in the cold without hat G
overcOat, in the bitter cold, but rum
mated, L maryeled and wondered, and a
last night l dreamed that the venerabl
Horace was a ferry boat and L steere
him.
Lost his old white hat!