The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1869-11-09
EHEEEKQUEFrR OF VISITS AND
CARDl.,


There are certain occasions when 90
ciety exRCtB the payment Of formal Wis.
ltB-as, for example, In exchange for
Q call OF courtesy, after an invitation 10
dinner, ball, or other ceremoneous en-.
tertainment; after weddings, births and
funerals; on every occurrence deemed
worthy OF personal congratulatlon; on
the return OF visiting acquaintance
10 his residence, whether In town or
the country; and Tho arrival and stay
OF visitor at the house OF o friend,
II would seem 70 DO tho object OF
modern fashion 70 interpose % many
formAlitieB as possible between the
members Of society, In order 10 prevent
Intimacy OF contact This, perhaps, 10
necessary result Of the Immense e&-
panslon OF the great cltles, and cOnse-
quent widening Of the social relation.
II would DO maulisatly impossible, II
every fashionable acquaintance became
an Intrinsic friend, and thus entitled
to the freedom OF familiarity, to retain
any OF that personal reserve which 10
essential % Beli-respeCt. No one, more
over, with even the Bmllleat visltlng.
list, II each person In II had The liberty
OF an intimate, and could present him.
self when, where, and how he pleased,
would be able 70 find time for The per.
formance ofthe ordinary duties Of daily
life. II II well, perhaps, therefore, that
bit Of cArd= board, with nothing on Il
but O name, has been generally accept.
ed % O symbol OF and substitute for
the formal visit. All sooIely has rea-
son 10 rejoice Ia q device by which The
bore has been politely but etiectualIy
baked Of bis yiotime. On most cer0.
moniouB 0cCaaIoRs, therefore. the hit
OF paSteboard 10 gratefully. accepted In
lieu OF o visit, m -,t .'rl- -, s'',, - :.
There 10 no fixed regulatlonl 10 regard
to the size, form, and character Of The
card and inscription; but all extremes
and marked peculiaritleB, every eooen.
trlcltyof form and letter, should be
avoided. 1T 10 customary 10 prefix TO
the name the military or naval intllea-
ton OF rank; the ordinary titles Of
Mr., iMfg;, land Miss and The pro.
fesSlonal-suCh as the Right Reyer-
end, The Reverend and 'Dr.p but In
this country Hon. and 'Excellency,'
for which there Ia no warrant but conr-
teHy, are never taken by the unassum-
ing. The address ID generally engraved
In modest letters In one corner. Il 10
deemed proper for q psrson TO leave the
card himself, or send IL By his own SER
want, bat not by the town post or street
porter. When one calls With the view
Of making personal visit, and Is not
admitted, he indIcatoa the fact of .ita
personality by farming down o corner
or broad edg6 OF the card. Phis, howl
ever, may be but q caprice OF fashion,
| Aant lnaH anon - 1IaI1 ~ a,aVtta aIi,n. -
Q totally different. kind. Even when
admitted to a house It is' rlghtto give
the servant Q card, by which the person
visited may be made unuttgt4kably
cogni2ant Of tina name. OF The. visitor. II
thore are several persons In the same
house entitled to calls, card should be
left for each. '-''''.'..'' PIT
A male visitor Ordinarily takes of bis
great coat before entering the drawing.
room; but carries his hatlu hIs hand.
His visit should be short, and generally
brought to close Whenever another,
who 10 not common friend OF himself
and the mistress Of the house, arrive.
In France, whenever newcomer OF
recognized responsibility 6xes bis resi-
dence in o place, he or she 10 expected
to mako the first calls. This, however,
Ia not the rule In England and Amsrl-
CO, where the settled residents are ex-
pected 10 pay the initiatory oourtesles,
although. In the large cities, when q
family returns after considerable alb.
sencsitt Is moi unusual u send cards to
their friends Rs an announcement OF
thetr.aIrlval, and 70 make known their
address. -as - -
New YEARS. calls are very much like
other visits, except that they are made
exclusively by the male sex; wider
range oftimes L. allowed for them (say
from ten O'Clock In the morning to nine
o'clock In the EVENING". and y greater
display Of toilette on the part of the
ladies', who receive, Ii expected. The
gentlemen, who alone make calls on
the occasion, present themselves ordi-
narily, as on othet, visits, In the fash
lonable costume Of the morning and
promenade, and 'not-ih the dress coat
and other parts Of the dinner and bail
array. The stay IL commonly very
short, and seldom continues after the
arrival Of a fresh conner. ARreat latI-
tude Is allowed to the use Of cards, and
the introduction by alvlsitor Of his
friends and acquaintanccs. The re-
freshments may be more or less abund.
ant and varied, according 10 the hos
pitable disposition and taste OF the
hostess. With the increase Of the great
cities, and consequent enlargement oil
our social circles, there Is u growing
disposition on the part OF fashionable
danes 70 refuse themselves on New
Years Day to all but relatives aud Ina
Inmates OF their families. Il --.--,
We need not make use Of the conyen-
tional lie, even II justified by the moral
philosopher Paley, which assorts that
we are not, though we are, 'at home,
when II 10 convenient, Tor any reason
whatsoever, to refuse q visitor. The
most fAstldious sensibllity should not
be offended at the simple and honest
word Engaged, = oIvlliy soitened by
the tact OF tudiclous servant,
The politest receivers Of -Ylslt,r II Of
the female sex, are not expected TO do
more than bow the head, say agracious
word or two Of farewell, and ring the
bell for the servant to open the door on
the departure OF male guest. Women,
however, are always treated with q
more condescendlng courtesy by the
well-bred even Of their own sex, who
will arise and accompany them at least
as far as the drawlng-room door /;
while every gallant man who. has been
honored by visit from a lady will
escort her to the last exit from his
house, and even to the steps OF the car
rlage, II there should DO one awaiting
her. Discreet vlsitoFs, always mindful
Of the suggestive line, Welcome the
coming, speed the parting guest will
llnger as little as possible IN trGnsitI
from door to door. f..
It Is generally the custom Of those
who profess to comply with the exac-
tions OF fashion 10 pay, when they are
about 10 leave their residences forever
or o considerable time, d farewell visit
to thelr acquaintance. Cards, how
ever, are ordinarily substituted for
personal interview, and upon these are
written the letters P. P. O. (pour prem
DIRE conge), TO take leaYe,'
The Best Time for KtlllhE IoEs.
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