Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1869-01-06
WELLS & COILS

"How's this, Paddy, that you've not
been to the church OF late ?"
"Be me sowl, seein' it's your river
ence, l cant answer ye, but if 'twere
the Protestant blackguard over beysnt, l
could dot.
Very well, then, Paddy" said the
priest, walking away bit; now, Tm
coming toward ye representative of the
Protestant minister, and so ye can an
swer me, Paddy. How is it ye've not
been to church of late p
Moind your own business, and get
oet of this, ye id ould Protestant limb
/ of the divil"
Of the Sherman House at Chicago he
says: They gave me room there away
up. l do not know exactly how high,
but water boils up there at l60 degrees.
l went up in q dumb-waiter which was
attached to balloon. TWAS not suit
able place for G hsd-chamber, but it was
a prominent attitude for an observatory.
The furniture consisted of table, a
camp-stool, wsshboard, German die
tionary and patent medicine almanac
for l842. / do not know whether there
was bed or not--I didn't notice. How
ever, was glad l got that room, for /
stayed there an hour and took notes of an
instructive conversation which was going
on in an adjoining apartment. over
heard the following legend:
mo, she wouldn't marry me. You were
misinformed. 1t was broken off, and in
the saddest way. l was not in the least
to blame, upon my word and honor,
though neither the girl nor her father,
the deacon, ever believed me, or ever
forgave me- 1t was during the election
canvass, when Lincoln ran the first time.
Two-thirds of tie honest deacons soul
were in religion, and the other third was
in politics-Lirlcoln man. l never was
a scoffer at religion in my life, but he
half believed was.
swell, there was to be political pow
WOW in the village church where he lived,
on Thursday night, and he was to pre-
side. l never thought anything about
the matter, but Williams hailed nae one
afternoon, offered me seat in his buggy,
and away we started 1t was Wednesday
curse the almanac - but we never
thought of it. Going into town, some
develish instinct put it into my head
that i. ;;houid help my case along if l
marched into church with q rail on my
shoulder; seeing that the girl and the
deacon would both be there. So / got a
rail, and we came into town shouting and
making grand to-do generally. AS we
went by the church windows / caught a
glimpse of her bonnet, and plenty other
bonnets, and was happy. l shouldered
my rail and marched in. The houseful
of men and women were all quiet, and
the old deacon was standing up in the
altar saying something splendid |
went blooming up the aisle with my
rail, swinging my hat and whooping:
"'Hoo-ray for Old Aoe-hco-ray for
the Illinois rail-splitter 7
'But never yelp out of that audience.
| quit right in my tracks. The deacon
said:
Sir, we are engaged in addressing the
Throne Of Grace. This unseemly exhi-
btion is ill-6tted to the solemnitiss of a
prayer.meeting.'
II never felt so sick in my life, John.
never felt so much like taking walk.
And don't you know. as l stood up there
before that congregation, I'd have given
q million dollars for some body to take
that rail out for me. But no; l had to
sneak out with it myself. l thew it
down and went up to where there was a
board fence, and practiced climbling
backward and forward through a knot hole
for as much as an hour But my goose
was cooked, yori know. 1t was all up
between me ami that family"
And so end ed the legend. Perhaps /
had no right to listen to it, but / did,
anyhow.
l have visited the tomb of Washing
ton, in Chicsgo, and also the birthplace
of Homer aud Michael Angelo, and then
adjourned to Cleveland, stirring, en-
terprising city of 100000 inhabitants.
Did you know that they claim 300, 900
for Chicago2 Cleveland contains one
of the finest streets in America-Euclid
avenue. Euclid is buried at one end of
1.-THE old original Euclid that invented
the algebra, misfortune overt.ike him. 1t
is devoted to dwelling houses entirely,
and it costs you 800, 900 to "come in"
Therefore, none of your poor white trash
can live in that street. You have to be
redolent of that odor of sanctity which
comes with cash. The dwellings are
very large, are often very pretentious in
the matter of architecture, and the
grassy and flowery yards they stand
in are something marvellous-being from
100 to 300 feet front and 900 feet deep
front on the avenue and another 'front.'
on Lake Erie.
/ had very good time visiting. In
another city fell out of g wagon back
ward and broke my ntck in two pieces.
Another time / fell in the river. and when
l was coming up the bank l got kicked
by a horse. Altogether had a splendid
time. l have to lecture great deal in
the West this winter, I'D expect to have
sonne nora finn