The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1869-01-27

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were walking around, at a safe dis
tanee fIOm the hive, grumbling, and
picking out the stings from their
| swollen chops. Just then the heavy
| tramp of men caused me to turn my
head to the read, and saw German
regiment marching up the road in
| fine style. It was evident that the
officers thought that they were about
! approaching a village, for they were
closing up the ranks of the regiment,
and the band were getting their in
| struments ready to play. AS they
were wheeling around the turn which
the road made as it passed the Dunk
er's mansion, the drum-majOr turned
towards his musicians, and waved on
high, most II majestically. has great
baton as signal to commerce.
The dFum-majori was a tall, stout
German, and was dressed most fan
tastically, according to military
custom. Medals and ornaments
covered his brightly -colored clothes,
and an immense bear-skin shake add
ed to the proportions of his tall form.
Marching backwards until the band
caught the measure of his exact
motions. he turned to march up the
road; just as the next backward step
would have placed him surrounded
by an Immense swarm of infuriated
bees.
''Dunder and Bitten, vat is dis 20
yelled the drum-msjor, as he leaped
traDtically in the air, f1ipging his
baton far away, and making his two
great hands revolve about his ears
like the sails of windmill. A few
more groteSque hops, skips, and antics
and the musical man, broke for the
was after him. Approaching, the
fence, he made bound, cleared the
i've bars, but catching his toe in an
upturned knot Of the upper rail he re-
volved at least three times before he
landed, with all his tinery, most me-
lndlously IN the great compost heap
OF the cowyard. II. lel -L
In the mean time, the front rank of
the musicians marched along, footing
all the while, but sadly out of of tune
and time, for they kept their wonder
ing eyes on the strange and unaccount-
abb movements Of their leader. But
all at once they too were seized with
conVulsIVe movements, which re-
minded the spectator of the worst
form of the st. Vitus dance, ac-
companied by touch of the jackson
itch.
The second rank, pressing close on
the heels of the first, was affected like
wise, and the air was filed with sax
hornes, from bones, clarinest, bugles,
and reed instruments, as they were
flung aside by the startled and frantic
musicians.
But the sublimest spectacle of all
was reserved for the big Dutchman
who presided over the great base-drum.
All, he was q huge fellow, and re.
minded me much of Van Amburg's
hippopOtamus. His head was big,
too, and his nose, which was as large
as quart bottle. was peppered with
red spots, which family indicated q
fUndness for the national beverage,
lager.
At this moment he was evidently
| bewildered, for his great google eyes
were rolling right and left, while he
held the drumsticks with his right
hand high up in the air, in the attitude
of striking but suddenly he ducked
his head, as quickly as a terrapin does
when touched On the nose with red
hot iron by some mischieveuS urehin.
The drumsticks dropped for his hands;
again he ducked his head, and con-
vulsively attempted to slip under the
great strap which passed over his
shoulders. and confined him to the
heavy drum. But it was mo go,''
| for the stout leather was strongly
buckled. Then he started to run /;
but at the very first step, his toe
struck stone, and he rolled on his
back in the dust. There he lay, kick
ing, blowing, pufings swearing, and
vainly attempting to free himself
| from the big drum, and at the same
time protect his venerable Point-his
nose-frOm the savage assaults Of the
enraged insects. But it was all in
vain and, making desperate effort;
he rose to his feet again, and started
to run /; but before twenty steps were
taken, he stubbed his toe again and
| turned a series of sumerseCs in the
| dust. Luckily, however, as he fell, a
| projecting root tore a wide slit in the
head of the drum. and 'Du tchy,
with the quiekness Of dispair, got up
on his knees, thrust his head iuto the
slit of the drum-head, and his hands
into his capacious pockets. The po-
sition was somewhat ridiculous, but
it Qfforded security against the attacks
Of the pursuing foe
Meanwhile the gallent Teutons-
the sanguinary men of War''--m arch
ed along, with muskets on the shoul-
der, and heads erected. "Rigut veel.
derep' shouted the pompous, pot
bellied little captain, as he turned
around to his men at the corner OF
the road. 'sRighJ Veel! Steady on
de right dere Stea-'
The word of command was not
finished, for the little Dutchman
hoped up and down In the most re-
diculous manner, and finally, throw
ing hown his sword, took to his heels
as though the Old Scratch was after
hi m. .-e
Then the viliant soldiers, as soon as
they had fairly passed the corner,
were seemingly bewitched in like
manner, Down went the line OF
muskets like flash of lightning, and
up went host of hands, waving and
br ushing about a host of short noses,
long noses, and all sorts CT noses.
At this time my strength forsook
me and I fell from my horse in perfect
paroxysm of laughter and before
could muster strength enough to stand
upon my feet half Of that great regi-
ment or strong men had been put to
| flight in q manner which was incom-
prehensible to the rear ranks.
In fact, the bees fought so long as
their was q single bee left to sting
and if had been called upon at that
moment to declare how many there
were in the hive, I Ishould have stated
unhesitatingly, that there was mill
! ion or two hundred insects to each OF
the five hundred dispersed Dutch
men.
When a scene now presented itself!
| Hogarth would have zone crazy with
laughter had he been there Joe Mill
eF would have died in five minutes
and IsVenture to say, that the ''man
who never smiled would have burst
ed a button or two. 70
HUNDREDS of muskets lay scattered
around, promiscuously mixed with
hats, knapsacks, dilagidated boots,
broken meershaum pipes, paper dick
les. disiointed coat-tails, trombones
and other brass instruments whilst
their late owners were roosting on the
distant fences, engaged in picking out
the stings from their red noses, and
in cursing each other in Dutch and
forty other languages.
| HA.o ,oIa.l. nr,,,I-o. H..