Buchanan County bulletin. [volume] (Independence, Iowa) 1869-1891, 1869-05-14
rnl: PASS DUMMEsss.

string to aid an unff riunate gentleman, l
have been for some days eagaged in tracing
the pedigee of Webster Snyder. One day
passed n his Office enabled me to find the
root Of his genealogical tree, and q very lit
tie labor has carried me up the said tree till
have sat astride of its several branches. and
on examination, ! fud no evidences whatevs
err Of grating. Its the same tree, the same
Snyder, all the way back to the distinguish
ed gentleman who laughed the devil in the
face when be stole his cattle and burned his
corn6elds, and afflicted him with those little
things which Josh Billings says would be
Just Is convenient if they we're somewhere
else. Webster Snyder is the General Super
intendent of the Union Pacific Railroad, and
Webster SNYDER il lineally descended from
NJ ID. kaov,i for be is the full em>
'bodiment Of patience notzisLat Patience
which sat on Bon.9uk And pspitsd st
grief, hut that eActA tA1Aa paeDescs shss EN-
suffer and be afflicted dnSoaplsiningiy, day
in and day out with the ten thousand three
hundred ard sixty~five incoFrigible, unmiti>
gated, internal Pass Bummers. And il there
be consummate and pertina .ions, as well
as impudent aud unreasonable loafer aud
vagabond in the wor d, be is your Pass Bum
mer. Before ninestenihs Of this class the
immorttl j. n. pales his Intellectual fires.
One day last week took seat behind
Superintendent Snyder, just to study the man
and human nature. j made the discovery
that about one.sixth Of his time was given
to the company, while he was robbed Of the
other fiyesixths by p. Bis.
Let me classify briefly few Of these fell
lows. Hardly had Mr.. Snyder reached his
desk that morning, before there entered
Tnx CLERICAL BuxxER. This p. B. was
dressed in faultless black, with white choker
and fresh paper collar a very placid smile
iIlumined his ten cent shaved 'countenance.
Without any letters or even giving his name,
be proceeded 10 state: am anxious, sir,
TO visit the towns along your road in the in>
terests OF the Young Mems Christian Asso,
lciation. understand that most OF the vest
tern people are entirely destitute Of religious
reading and teaching. wish to supply
these Deficiencies. would like an annual
passport over the Union Pacific Railroad
Very quietly Mr.. Snyder looked at his impu>
dent reverence, and then with politeness in
formed white choker that the President OF
the Young Mems Christian Association OF
Omaha had that matter in charge. He had
better call on that gentleman FIRST. Exit,
frowning, clerical hummer.
The APPLICANT BuMMER.-This gentle-
man looked little seedy, wore spectacles,
and was barefooted on the top Of his head,
" would like place ~ station agent aud
telegraph operator" Have you any rec
concentrations p queries Mr.. s. Handing
q letter to him, Mr.. Snyder reads: The
bearer is honest and respectfully consec,ed
He has been discharged our service for in
attention to businessp "well," says Mr..
Snyder, this is . poor credential. lin sure
| don't want you." "Can't you give me a
pass over the roa12" A very decided mo-
when exit A. B.
BULL WnAcEER.-TLis fellow bore every
evidence, in person, clothes, aud general
make up, ot being Whist the yesseaa people
call q Bull whackern Long haired,
slouched hat with fourteen inch brm, un>
shaved, breeches crammed into his boots
and one cheek pouchcd out with tobacco like
chipmupfs Si1h = Sak1h.s FEsbNing him
self sideways Q u the railing, be proceeded in
the peesiiar bullyiHg drawl Of the profess
ional b. w. to ssy that be had just brought
in seven car loads of cattle BY the railroad,
and be wanted to pass to the end Of the
track. Superintendent Snyder happened 10
know that cattle were not arriving very much
at this season of the year, SO with q sarcas>
tic smile, Mr.. b. w. was refused. had
The ELEGASr BuNNER,-Your profess
ionally elegant hummer may BE divided and
subdiyided into many grades the American
and the foreigner, the Yankee and the Can
adian, the rich man aad the dead beat. Tie
one that day was got mp regardless Of ex>
pense. He was as stylish as il he was Just
returning FROM Grace Church after : very
happy marriage ceremony had been pro-
nounced over him. Handing bis card to Mr..
Snyder, be opened out like tss>vheeled lo>
comotise going over the Black Hills. "Just
arrived from Boston; delightful country
this; have always admired the West am
glad your road has got along SO fast; couldn't
think Of returning last without taking tour
over the Pacific Railroad besides, / would
like to hear Brigham Young preach to see If
he is better orator than Henry Ward
Beecher." swell, sir?r asks Mr.. Snyder
hesitatingly; "what can l do for you n
!. Oh, ah, f.thousht wosld accsps q COM
you know have many ffispds
on East Bus Mr.. Suydcr didn't know il,
nor did be "see" the complimentary. Exit
z. B. very much offended.
TIE Social BuxnrR.-This class is larye>
y on the increase. Il, like the elegant buns
mer, may be divided into many kinds. Mains
Il, however, b is composed of railsoad OH
cials, hotel>ksepsrs asd clerks, and sleam>
boat captains. These people generally have
passes, but they are very much given to