Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1869-05-28
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

PAPER CUFFs-Newspape attacks.
TIE phantom sail-A mock auction.
SLoTu is the key to let in beggary,
How TO turn peoples heads Go late
to church.
THE happiest man-He who thinks him
self so.
The largest ants in the world are called
elephants.
How To make people acknowledge the
corn-Tread on their toes.
AN order has been received at Newport,
| Il. l., from Paris, for furnace to warm a
church in Japan.
WHY is halfpast seven o'clock in the
evening like next mornings breakfast?
Only because it isn't eight yet
THE boy who was caught looking into
the future has been arrested for trying to
| see the show without pay.
No PERSON ever got stung by hornets
who kept away from where they were. 1t
| is just so with bad habits.
Two ROMANTIC girls in London recently
sought death in company by stabbing
themselves with their scissors.
AN English clergyman identified his Bi-
| BILE in court from the marks of its having
been used as a razor strop.
THE latest thing in the pipe line is imi-
tation meerschaum made of bread. The
pipes harden and color beautifully.
AT Tacubays, Mexico, not long since
| two young and pretty women fought q
duel with pistols, and ono was seriously
wounded.
AT Lowell, Mass, the other day. the city
bill.poster stuck the notices To milkmen
on the public pumps, certain that they
would be seen there.
WHY is one dollar greenback better
than n silver dollarH When you fold it
you double it, and when you open it you
find it increases.
A WOMAN who was fixing up" TO be
baptized at Athens, Ga, on recent Sun
day, was arrested for stealing clothes to
wear during the baptismal ceremony.
any dear" asked John, on observing
new striped hose on his only heir "why
have you made barber's poles of Ernest't
legs?" Because he's little shaver
was the reply.
THE University of Edingburgh recently
granted permission to young lady TO at
tend the medical lectures, but the students
made such loud objections that the favor
was withdrawn.
AN indian stone chisel was recently
plowed up in Pownsl, Ne. 1t is com
posed of the Mount Kineo stone, so much
used by the Indians for their cutting in
struments, and is smoothly finished.
ONE thousand years before the birth oI
Christopher Columbus, the Chinese Year
Books say, company Of Buddhist priests
entered America by way of Alaska, and
examined the whole western coast ot
North America.
Two LOVERS stood upon the shore o
Massachusetts, Bay, bidding sad farewell
i before Seth tore himself away "Pl
marry you when l come back, my Sally
Ann" says he - and then he took little
smack, and sailed away to sea.
A MARE was stolen IN Texas village
and subsequently was heard from ina dis
tant town. The owner sent a message il
regard to her, and a day or two after
wards received reply as follows; "Youl
mare is here; | will bring her THE
hung"
. In Jacksonville, Fla, some one stole th
= recently laid cornerstone Of new Bap
: tist Church, in order 10 despoil 1t Of tn
= silver coins and currency closed up in II
= The stone was carried some distance, bu
the effort to get the money out was fail
/
A uTe.
q THE Fat Contributor advertises 70
i. proposals for marriage, which must be d
/ rected, Proposals TO board and cloth
q the Fat Contributor for an indehnit
/. period accompanied by three suretie
/. that the bidder won't elope with anothe
s man.
n LORD PALMERsToN was always very pa
J. ticular to write nothing rashly. He wrot
e at a standing desk, and kept his inkstan
o at the other end of the room, so that b
% had the time occupied in crossing th
e room twice TO reflect upon what ne intenC
4, ed 10 say. His own excuse for this hao
ls was that he obtained necessary exercis
IS by il.
Is A RECENT book of historical remini
e ccnces of the House Of Commons narratI
ie the laughable failure of one member VIII
II rose fully primed for first attempt d
If said Mr., Speaker, ! am astonished-