Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1869-09-03
woman'~ Rights.
AS CONSIDERED by ARrEMus wanr

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Tpitcht my tent In small town II
Iniianny one day last season, ant
while / was standin at the door TAX In
money, depytashun of ladies came
up & sed they wos members of the
Bumkumville Female Moral Refor.
min Il Wimin's Rites Associashum
and they axed me If they Good go I'm
without payin. a.
Not exactly sez +, but you can
pay without going in.' ....
Dew you know who we air?' said
one of the wimin--a tall and feroshus
looking critter, with knotton um-
breller under her arm--'dew you
know who we air, sir?'
My impre-hun is,' sed I, from a
kersery view, that you air females
we air SIR sed the feroshus wo-
man--'we belong to society which
believes wimin has rites--which be-
Ieeves In razin her to her proper
speer@- believes she Ii endowed
with as much fntelleck as man ia
which believes she is trampled on
and aboozed-& who will resist
hence.4th & forever the incroach-
ments of proud domineerin men,
Durin her discourse, the exsentric
female grabbed me by the coat koller
g. wos swingin her umbreller wildly
over my head. s-. @#
Il hope, marm,' seq I, startin back,
that your intenshuns Is honorable?
I'm lone man hear I'm strange
place. Besides I've wife to hum
Yes cried the female, '& she's a
slave! Doth she never dream of free
dom-doth she never think of throw
I'm off the yoke of tyranny & thinkin
& votin for herself? Doth she never
think of these ere things.?'
Not bein natural born fool, sed
I, by this time little riled, Il kin
safely say that she dothunt.'
20 whot-whotr screamed the fe-
male, swingin her umbrelIer i'm the
air. %, whot IL the price that wo-
man pays for her experiunce?'
Il don't know sed /; the price to
my show is Is cents pur individooal.
& can't our society go I'm free?' axed
the female. .."".
Not IL / know It, sed T. -. '..
'Crooil, crooil mani she cried &
bust into teers.
Won't you let my darter in?' sed
anuther of the excentric wimin, talk
in me affeckshunitely BY the hand.
%, please let my darter in--she's
sweet, gushin child of natur,'
Let her gush!' rored /, az mad ms
conld stick at their tarnal nonsense.
Let her gush' Whereupon they
all sprung back. with the simultani-
Gus observashun that / was Beest.
My female friends sed /, 'b4 you
leave I've few remarks to remark;
wa them we'll. The female women
II one of the greatest institoo-
shuns Of which this land can bost.
It's impossible to git along without
her. Had there bin no female VIM
in In the world, / should scarcely be
here with my unparaleld show on
this very occashun, She Is good i'm
sickness--good In wellness--good oil
the time. o, woman, worilan!' /
cried, my feelins worked up to hi
poetick pitch, you air angel when
you behave yourself; but when you
take off your proper apparel & met
tyforicaily speaking git into panty
loons-when you desert your fire.
sides. Il with your heds full of VIM
iu's rites noshuns, go round like rorin
lyons, seekin whom you may de-
vour--in short, when you under
take to play the man, you play the
devil, and air an emfactic noosance.
My female friends continnered, rs
they was Indignantly departin, wa
well what A. Ward has sedu