The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1869-03-31
A Cougressmar,s TribuIa,Iou

Inc following Is from Don Platts last
Washington letter to the Cincinnati
Commercial:
l was at work in my room, yesterday;
when tall specimen of upright human
ity stalked in. 4
"Are you D. P. 7" it asked.
Since entering upon my vocation of
correspondent, mean a truthful, inde-
pendent correspondent, l regard that
question with suspicion. 1 quietly
reached out, and in careless, graceful
manner put my right hand on paper
weight OF few pounds, made of "Black-
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS cast.steel, bent
cOld," for the use of the learned CON-
mittee on Commerce, and regarded my
visitor closely.
lie was a man of about fifty six, with
a bald head, curious sharp little eyes.
an undecided nose, and chin that re-
treated into paper collar. His clothes
were of what we call store goods, in the
Far West, and had evidently exhausted
the genieus of a village tailor. His legs
were slender and shaky, not from age,
but from habit of never Strengthening
them at the knee | said To myself,
this is not d fghtist. He Shulties
through life. He has shuffled into Office.
So l released my hold on the paper
weight, and boldly responded:
THAT is my name, sir"
IL am Mr. -, member Of Congress
from -. | have read your letters.
Mr.. -, the editor of our paper, told
me TO look you up"
81 am glad 10 know you, sir. Take Il
seat. What can do for you !"
81 want some passes" he said, earn
estly, seating himself.
"What sort of passes 7"
Railroad"
81 fear l can not help you in that
way, Mr. -. l had pass for myself
and family, from the Baltimore and Ohio
Railroad, but because, in return for the
compliment, l said the President had a
locomotive in his belly, l am cut off.
But why do yOu want passesi Are you
preparing to run away ~
81 wish | conld. No, that is not it. l
am run down by office seekers from my
district. They pile in on me at my
boarding house. have been sleeping,
every night, on my bedroom floor.
They follow Inc about, and chase me
down. They have smoked all my cigars
and drank up all my whisky, and now
they are getting out of money and want
TO borrow. | heard where to find you;
made an excuse to go into an alley, and
ran away. Apolice officer thought
was thief, and ran after me. / told
him l was member of Congress, run
ming from the office seekers. He said
that was ruff aud let me 90. There is
one, u woman, worse than all the rest.
She wants the best postofficc | have.
What in the internal does Grant mean
by setting such an example? All the
females in my district are writing to
me, and two hundred will be here some
! how, if we don't repeal this fool law
and fill the offices. This woman tor
ments my life out; and, yet, if l give
her the office, | won't dare go home.
She fo!lers me up like Satan. / can't
eat, | can't sleep, / can't put on a clean
shirt, she pops In on me so unexpected.
Now, if | had railroad pass"
"How you'd that help you? p
81 believe if could say to her, | can't |
give you IN Office, bat here is railroad |
pass, she'd take it and go. But, Lord !
love you, / want a hundred. They're |
getting out of money, tell you, and i'll
l only had 'em. Now, can't you help |
meR You newspaper men always have |
lots of passes. The editor in our town |
hasn't paid railroad fare for more'n |
twenty years"
l had to assure my poor friend that
really could not help him. l suggested !
to him TO get q sign painted, "Small por
in this house." and put Ii up over his
door.
Pooh" he cried. 'do you suppose
they'd care for thatf Every bloody one
of 'em would get vaccinated, and work
in on me. Cholera would not keep 'em
off. wish Id been sunk into eternal
thunder before | consented to come to
Congress. Consented l worked like
a mule for it. 1t cost me all of eight
hundred dollars,-more fool / What
can do? My ncighbors and constitu-
ents wanted a national dog law, for the
better production OF sheep, and to raise
the price of wool. Why, it would take !
4 fellow two years to learn the rules,
and then | don't think l could do |
hOotcr. Bat Cuss these oilice-seckers." |
"GOu are safe on the floor. however"
"Dev!l q bit. They get round the |
doors, aud send in their names. They
run up in the gallery, to see if Pm there,
and then down they come. hid in the
barber shops every day for a week, be-
fore they found me out And then Lit
tlebang, who wants 10 be Minister to !
Europe, wrote home to the paper, and |
said had been made Chairman of the |
standing committee on Hair
How long my friend would have con-
tinued his lamentations / cannot say, !
hut he was interrupted by an arrival of
sixteen of his friends, and left very de- |
iected D. P.