The New Orleans crescent. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1866-1869, 1869-01-24
clusohed our loaf of bread, and vanished with tho

Oeu~Aou Jul iooi Vi oredo, anu Naulsneu Win tho
BullfDch with distracted eyes was following
tnls unaccountable figure tout at the porial.n
like the ghost In Hamlet. when the weiter who
ought 70 wait upon us iossled against O., carrying
"waiter ~ said . severe diner, Iatelv;6nssed.
perusing bis bill iercely through his eseglass.
The waiter put down our tureen on a remote side
table, and went to see what wss smIss 10 this
new direction.
"Tbis is not right you know. waiter. Look
here. Here's yesterdays sherry, ooe aud eight
pence, and here we are again, two shihings. And
what does six pence mean :"
So farfrom knowing what six pence meant, the
waiter protested that he didn't know what any
thing meant. He wiped the perspratiot from hin
clammy brow, and said IL was impossible TO do
lt-not particularzing what-and the kitchen was
so far of.
Take the bill to the bar, and get it altered"
said Mr.. Indignation Cocker so to call, Aim.
The waiter took II, looked intenselyat ii. did
not seem to like the idea of taking Il % the bar.
and submitted, as a new light upon the cease, that
perhaps sixpeDce meant six pence.
81 tell you again, ;" said Mr.. Indignation Cocker.
" here's yesterdays sherry-can't yoQ see III
one and eigbtpence. and here we are again, two
shillings. What do you make of one and eight
pence and two shilliDgs!"
Totally unable to make anything Of one and
eightpence and two shillings, the latter went out
TO try if anybody else could; merely casting a
backward glance at Bull6nch In acknowledgment
of his pathetic entreaties for our soup tureen.
After a pause, during which Nc. Indignation
Cocker read newspaper and coughed defiant
coughs, Bullhnch rose to get the tureen, when the
waiter reappeared aud brought IL; dropping Mr..
Indignation Cookers altered bill on Mr.. Indigna
tion Cookers table as he came along.
tits quite impossible to do IL, gentlemen"
muTmured the waiter 4" and the kitchen is 30 far
off," 60. -. .
"wen. You don't keep the house.; it's not
your fault. We suppose: Bring some cherry"
aIf Ernr M lu1fs ftas.( Etnlyo wrr,kh
new and Burning sense Of injury upon him.
The waiter, arrested on bis way o:our sherry,
stopped short, and came back to Sc. what was
wrong now.
"will you look here' This is worse than be-
fore. Do you understand Here's sesterday's
sherry one and eiehtpence, and here 80 are again
two shillings. And what the devil doeis ninepence
mean?"
This new portent utterly confounded shs waiter.
he wruDg bis napkin, and mutely appealed TO the
ceiling.
waiter, fetch that sherry" says Bullinch, in
open wrath and revolt. slfT--'
7" want to KNOW persisted Mr.. Indignation
Cocker, " the meaning Of ninepence.t / want TO
know the meaning of sherry one and eightpence
Send somebody" -
The distracted waiter got ont of the room under
pretext of sending somebody and bv that means
got our wine. But the instant he appeared with
our decanter. MIR. Indignation Cocker descended
on him again.
Waiter :"
"You will DOW have the goodness to attend to
our dinner, WAITER" says Bullfnch, sternly.
&" am very sorry, but it's quite impossible to
do i gentlemen" pleaded the waiter; and the
Waiter ~ said Mr.. Indignation Cocker.
" Is" resumed the waiter, $50 far of that"
waiter ~ persisted Mr.. Indignation Cocker.
"send somebody
We were not without our fears that the, waiter
rushed out TO hang himself, and we were much
relieved by his feichng somebod yin gracefully
flowing skirts and with a wsist-who very soon
settled Mr.. Indignation Cookers business,
" Oh J" said Mr.. Cocker, with his iressurpris-
ingly quenched by this apparition. az wished to
ask about this bill of mine, because it alsears to
me that there's little mistake here. SLet me
show you. Here's yesterdays sherry one and
eghtpence, and here we are again two snillings.
And how do yon explain ninepence?"
However, ii was explained in tones toe soft to
be overheard; Mr.. Cocker was heard 10 Say moth.
ing more Than "Ah-h-hl Indeed T6.ak youl
Yes" and shortly afterwards went outjsa milder
map.
Tie lonely traveller with the stomach syhe had
all this time suffered severely dra wing do leg
now and then and slipping hot brandy and water
with grated ginger Ia II. When we tsted our
very mock-turtle soup, and were instantly seized
with symptoms Of some disorder Stimulating apo
plexy, and occasioned by the surcharGe of the
lose and brain with lukewarm dish wateb rholding
in solution sour flour, poisonous oondimssts and
Nsy) seveniy-hve per cent. of misce llaneous
kitchen stun rolled into balls, we we're ir'iined TO
trace his disorder to that source. On sae other
hand, there was silent anguish upon him too
strongly resembling the results ssta ishs within
ourselves by the sherry TO be discar,sd from
alarmed consideration. Again we obse s$ed him,
with terror, 10 be much overcome by dur sole's
being aired in temporary retreat close to him
while the waiter went out Gas we concf uved) TO
see his friends. And when the curry ma..s lis ap.
pearance be suddenly retired in gresS disor-
Ter.
In fine, for the uneatable part of this lsstle din.
yer (as conlradisnguished from the undr -Skabe)
Ne paid only seven shillings and sixpen:S each.
And Bullinch and agreed unsnimouslyS$hat no
uch observed, disappointed, iIl-cooked Ssty lit
lie dinner could De got TOR the money e6Fwhere
Use under the sun.aWith that eomforl-.to our
Jacks, we turned them on the dear ol1<STeme
aie, the charging Temerare, and resfsssd lin
be Scottish diaiect) to gang nae maif to the
abby Temeraire. q.