Clarksville chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 186?-1872, 1869-09-18
pERILs OF DRINKING BAD WHISKY.

PERILS OF DRINKING BAD WHISKY. Z
Many years ago, when tho State of
Georgia was in its infancy, one of
the Circuit Judges was Bella Brown,
an ancestor Of the recent "secesh''
Governor of that name. He was a
man Of ability and integrity, but like
q good many distinguished persons
of that day, he loved a social glass
and whenever the members of the bar
would turn in and help, he sometimes
drank to excess and became glori-
ously fuddled. On one occasion,
while travelling on his circuit, he
reached the village Of Dayton, in
Dooly county, where the court was
to be opened next day, and took
quarters with relative Of his wife,
that lady accompanying him. After
supper Judge Brown strollcd over to
the only tavern in the place, kept by
one Sterritt, where he met number
Of his legal friends. A convivial
evening was passed Fl; drinks frequent
ly went round, and somewhere about
midnight, the Honorable Bella was in
state, Of mind quite the reverse Of
that implied by the old saw, "Sober
as Judge" When he was leaving
for home, one of the young lawyers,
in spirit of mischief, siyly passed
some. spoons from the tumbler into
tba Judoo,e pookat
On dressing himself next morn
ing the eccentric official, putting his
hand into his pocket, was greatly
perplexed in discovering three or
four silver spoons.
"My God! Polly" said he to his
wife, ''just look here believe, I've
stolen some of Sterritt's spoons"
"Let's see them,' says the wife,
ayes, sure enough-here's his verb
table initials! Pray how did you
happen to have them in your pocketT'
81 think / must have been drunk
when 1 came home, wasn't l ?" in
auired the Judge.
"Yes," replied the devoted Polly,
"you know your old habit when you
get among those lawyers"
Certainly; ! can understand easy
enough how it all came about. That
fellow, Sterritt, keeps the meancst
liquor in the State but never sup
posed that to drink it would make a
man steal p
The spoons were duly returned to
the landlord, and the Judge went and
opened his court, thinking no more
about the matter. Several days
elapsed, and the business of the court
was drawing to close, when one morn
ing rough-looking customer was ar.
raigned before his Honor for larceny
lie pleaded guilty, but said in miti
cation that he was drunk at the time
of committing the offence.
"What is the nature Of the charge
against the man 2" inquired Judge
Brown.
Stealing money from the till a
Stcrritt's tavern" replied the clerk
"Young man." said the Judge
solcmnly, care you sure you wal
intoxicated when you took that mon
ey?"
Eyes, your Honor, I was so joll,
drunk that things looked like they
were dancing double shuttle, ant
when l went out doors the grount
kept coming up and hitting me OF
the head"
"That will do" replied the Judge
But tell me, did you get the liquo
you drank at Sterritt's ?"
"Evcry drop Of it, your Honor.
"And 80 you got tipsy on his liquo
and then stole his money!"
"That's it exaclly; l didn't know
what | was doing"
Turning to the prosecuting attor
ncy, the worthy magistrate said =
"rhis is most extraordinary case
Mr., Attorney, and one, l think, dc
manding the clemency of the Court
You will, therefore, do me the favo
of entering nolte PROSE-. Tha
liquor Of Sterritts, l have reason t
know, is mean enough to make
man do anything dirty, got drum
on it myself, the other night, an
stole all his spoons. If Sterritt wi
sell such abominable stuff, he ough
not to have the protection of thi
Court. You may release the prisol
er, Mr., Shcritf,-lGcorgia Constitu
tioualist.