The Valley Virginian. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1865-1895, 1869-07-29


his stricken holiday, and reclining on bench
RECALLED himself on the beauties OF Ion
Paine, awaiting the arrival of the preacher
It was not over an hour before he heard TIT
words,
"How happy are they, who their Saviour
obey,
! And have laid up their treasures above"
sung in a full, clear voice, and soon the 70
calist, turning the angle Of rock, rode lels
urely up with contented smile on his face
How are you old slabside ! Gct OF you
horse and join in my devotion Z SAID thu
blacksmith.
81 have many miles to ride, answered thu
! preacher, and haven't time my friend; II
call as return" 5asiil.
| aYour name is Stubbleworth, and you are
the hypocrite the Methodists have sent here
Ell ~ ~ @
envy namo is Stubbleworth, he meekly
replied. s
s'Didn't you know my name was Ned Forge
| ron, the blacksmith, who whips every Meth.
odist preacher that goes through this gap 9
was asked with an audacious look sand
how dare you here p #ss ,s..9s.
The preacher replied that he had heard
Mr.. Forgeron's name, but presumed that he
did not modest we'll behaved travellers.
sYou presume to presume SO Yes, you
are che most presumptuous people, you Meth
odists, that ever trod shoe leather, anyhow.
Well what'll you do if I. don't whip you
this time, you beet. headed disciple 20" pr
Mr.. Stubbleworth protested his willingness
to do anything reasonable to avoid such pc
nance. &.
aWell, there's three things you have to do;
or T II maui you into jelly. The first is,
you are to quit preaching; the second is,
you must wear this last will and testament OF
Thomas Paine next to your heart, read it
every day, and believe every word you read !;
and the third is, you are to curse the Metho-
dists in every crowd you get into" s2.
The preacher looked on during these nov
ell propositions without line Of his face be-
ing moved, and at the end replied that the
terms were unreasonable and he would not
submit to them. sssss
swell you've got whaling to submit to-,
then; I'll tear you into doll rags corner ways,
Get down, yon beggar"
The preacher demonstrated. but Forgeron
walked up. to the horse and threatened to
tear him off if he did not dismouat, where
upon the worthy man made virtue Of a ne
cessity, and alighted. " ii
Il have but one request to make OF you,
my friend, and that is, that you won't beat me
with this oyercoat on. = It was present fre m
the ladies of my last circuit, and do not
wish to have it torn" bsI
sOf with it then, and that suddenly: you
basin faced imp, you" !.
The Methodist preacher slowly drew OFT
the surtout as the blacksmith continued his
TRADE Of abuse on himself and his sect, and
as he drew his right hand from the sleeve,
and threw the garment behind him, he dealt
Mr.. Forgeron tremendous blow between
his eyes, which laid that person at full length
on the ground, with the testament of Tom
Paine beside him. The Rev. Mr.. Stubble-
worth, with tact of connoisseur in such mat
tiers, did not wait for his adversary to rise,
but mounted him with the quickncss Of a
cat, and as he bestowed his blows with a
bounteous hand on the stomach and face Of
the blacksmith. continued his song where he
had left off on his arrival at the smith:
ssTonque cannot express the sweet comfort and
peace fysf r-
Of a soul in its earliest love- +.
Until Mr.. Forgcron, from having experience
ed, first love- or other sensation equally new
to him, responded Justify, 'Nough 'nough !!
take him off !" But, unfortunately, there
was no one by to perform that kind office,
except the old roam, and he munched a bunch
Of grass and looked as quietly as if his mas
ter was happy alta canp.meeting. i
"Now,' said Mr.. Stubbleworth, there are
three things you must promise me before |
let you up
aWhat are they ~ asked Forgcron eager
ly.
"The first is that you never modest Meth
odist preacher again" Here Ned's pride
rose, and he hesitated, and the reverned gen
tleman, with his usual benign smile on his
face, renewed his blows and song
"I ride on the sky, freely justified!
And the moon it was under my feet"
This oriental language overcame the black
smith; such bold figures, or something else,
causing him to sing out. "Well, I'll do it!
I'll do it p 81
G You arc getting on very well, " said Stub
bleworth. 6 [ think can make a decent
man out of you yet, and perhaps Christian =
Ned groaned.
"The second thing require Of you is to
go to the Pumykinvine creek meeting house,
and hear me preach tomorrow"
Ned attempted to stammer out some excuse
-" -I-I-that is" j; ...s.i
When the divine resumed his devotional
hymn and kept time with the. music by strik.
ing him over the face with the deshy part Of
his hand, $685.
"My soul mounted higher on a chariot OF fire,
Nor did envy Elijah his seat
sNed's promise Of punctuality caused the
parsons exercise to cease, and the words rem.
dolent of gorgeous imagary died away in
echoes from the adjacent crags.
| CHOW the third and and last demand ]
| make of you is peremptory" Ned was
all attention to know what was to coyne
next. "You are to promise to seek reii
Igion day and night, and never rest unit
YOU obtain it at the hands of a mercifu
| Redeemer.'' The fallen man looked at the
declining sun, and then at the parson, anc
knew not what to say, when the latter in
dividuaI began to raise in song once more
and Ned knew what would come next.
CPL do my best" he said in an humblee
voice. s.s,.
esWell, that's man p Mr.. Stubblewoftl
said. CHOW get up and go down to thu
branch and wash your face, and dust you
clothes, and tear up Mr.. Paine's testament
L -