The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1869-08-03

| POLICE COURT.-1nep ponce Court yes
terday morning presented mice variety.
The number was sufficient. The variety
made things pleasant. go @
A little moke, named David B. Thorpe,
whose best grip is throwing stones, was
up on q charge of disorderly conduct.
1t is truly wonderful, the ability that
little niger displays in throwing stones.
1t is his first amusement in the morning
and the last at night. We do not doubt
but that, should be wake, he would rise
from his couch at the dead hour of mid.
night, when the world is hushed and the
pale moon sailing serenely and like g
queen, smiles in beauty on our silent
earth, with nary trowsers on his ebony
legs, and his short shift tapping like a
flag, to throw stones. Next to throwing
stones Dave has ability to shed tears.
TO see that boy shed tears always puts
as In mind of water works. He has
an exhaustless supply. As he stood be-
fore Judge Good yesterday, he turned
on the spiggot and let the water come.
Tears as big as kidney beans stood in
his eyes or coursed down his roaming
nose, and fell in great splashes on the
floor of the halls of Justice. He was
fined 81 and costs.
Margaret Mccormick is one of Hiber'
nica's fairest danes. Arrayed in pur-
pie and fine linen, with diamonds and
pearls and rubies and emeralds and
amethysts for ornaments, she entered
the dread presence of the offended law
unabashed aud with step like aqueen.
oh, Margaret, who shall depict thy
beauty! Who shall convey to future
generations correct representation OF
that prominent and useful feature, thy
nose, with its classic and funny end
turned up as if in scOrn of the world and
in defiance of it's bad smells; with the
three little pimples or warts on the end
of it, as if they were three little mis-
chievous imps hanging over the edgs
and peeping int the wide-spreadiDg
nostrils below' Or thy mouth reach.
ing, like poor mans lease, from (y)ear
to (y)sar' Or thy knotted and CON-
bined locke, innocent of chignon, and
false curls, and rats, but very sugges-
tive of pigsi Who shall tell thy agony
when the base slave charged thee with
being drunk Drunk! Thou drunk
Thou, the divine draught of whose
beauty men have drained and become
intoxicated! Thou drunk! Why did
not the avenging gods send down first
class bolt of lightning to strike the
catiff deadi Aud the Judge believed
the horrible story and sentenced the
gentle Margaret to linger at Castle
Faris for twenty days in default of pay
ment of IS and costs. As she departed
in the custody of an officer it seemed as
if the light had been withdrawn, as if
the sun were eclipssd. BIobbs said it
was because she put her kerchief over
her proboscis. Maybe it was, maybe it
was.
James st. Meyers, for using language
calculated to provoke breach of the
peace. was fined 81 and costs.
Louis Beltzer was on plain drunk.
There was nothing in the matter of q
scollopy kind. He was fined 81 and
costs. Cheap for headache three miles
square.
Thomas Murphy and Magnus Long
got into quarrel at the stone bridge on
Sabbath evening. They were IS and
costs each.
Charles Morris was as full as a goose.
For being drunk he was fined S and
costs.
Alex McNichael was disorderly. Alex
was very disorderly. Alex has an idea
when he feels that generous beverage
benzine-workipg on his muscles, that
he is bully boy with tin ear. He was
fined $40 and costs.