Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1869-10-21
Miscellaneous.

MISCELLANEOUS.
"A harmless notwithstanding in tears.
Business men insure in the Washing
ton Life.
The right man in the right place--A
husband at home in the evening
-Idleness is hard work for those who
are not used to it, aud dull work for those
who are.
-Squib speaking financially, says it
was the last camel's hair for Mrs S. which
brok his back.
Dividends are never forfeited in the
Washington Life Insurance Company of
New York.
"A Texas murderer particularly re-
quested the Sheriff to dress him in pur-
pie shroud after he was hanged.
-Sheridan's troopers have captured an
Indian chief who boasts of having taken
one hundred and five white scalps.
An undertaken having apartments to
let posted his bills upon the collins in the
window, announcing lodgings for sin
gle gentlemen"
Slender Party (ol0 is not oery com
tortabIe). "These street cars ought to
charge by weight" Stout Party (sharply)
All, if they did they would never stop
to pick you up"
-" Bridget, what became of the tallow
creased my boots with this morning ~
/ fried the buckwheats in it." "Oh, |
was afraid you had wasted it."
"A wealthy farmer of Hartford, a KEEP
tomanlac, was recently caught stealing
linseed oil from hardware store in that
city. He was fined $75 and costs of the
suit.
"A swell, while being measured for a
pair of boots, observed, "Make them
cover the calf" Impossible p exclaimed
the astonished bootmaker, surveying his
customer from head to foot; II have not
leather enough"
"A temperance lecturer has started
from Kansas with the declared intention
of walking to Augusta, Me-, and deliver
ing lecture on temperance every evening
while ON his way.
-Epigram on the oiled and pertumed
ringlets OF certain dandy
OF miracles this is sans doate, the most rare,
lever perceived heard reported, or read
man with abundance of scents in his hair,
Without the least atom of sense in his head
-" think have seen you before, sir"
said one gentleman to another. care you
not Owen SMITH" go, yes" said the
other, I'm OWN Smith. and OWN
Jones, and OWN Brown, and OWN every
body"
In its early days the ANa Californian
once contained a paragraph which run
thus: "VVe have no w in our type, as
there is none in the Spanish alphabet.
we have sent to the Sandwich Islands
for this letter; until it arrives we must
use two VS."
The n Y SIN, describing new hotel
in the Fifth avenue, New York, says
"The walters are of ineffablc elegance, and
of an intellectual cast of countenance.
They look like graduates of Harvard.
They wear two clean shirts and two white
chokers a day, and change their aprons
three times an hour. A spot on bosom,
or a crease in a tie, involves instant dis
missal"
"A live eyeless fish from the Mammoth
Cave is on exhibition at New Orleans.
llc FuyuW utsCTlDtS III us lDldlly ucsll-
tute of eyes, and about five or six inches
long, much like a catfish in shape, but
without scales or outer skin, and perfectly
transparent. 1t feeds entirely on the
animalcul,e to be found in water and this
must be regularly changed to supply it with
food.
-" Mother wants to know if you won't
please to lend her your preserying-kettle,
cause she wants to do up some apple
sarse' "Lwould with pleasure, boy, but
the truth is, the last time we lent it to
your mother she preserved it so eflectual-
" that we have not seen it since, Well,
you needn't be sarsy about your old kettle.
Guess ii was full of holes when we Dor
rowed it, and mother wouldn't have
troubled you agin, only we seed you bring
home new ONE
"A local editor Of the San Francisco
Chronicle has attended Chinese theatrical
performance in that city. Speaking of the