Weekly Trinity journal., 1869-09-04
Mike Finck and the Bull.

Before steamboats, had been introduced on the
Western rivers, Mike Finck was 6atboat man
on the Mississippi, noted far and wide as
champion fighter and trough customer geper-
ally, and who seldom came out ' second best'
In his numerous encounters. Many laughable
adventures which befell him are related, among
which the story of Mike and the bull is one of
the best. Mike took notion to go in swim
ming, one Sunday, and he had just got his
clothes off when he saw Deacon Smiths bull
making at him-the bull was vicious animal
and had come near killing two or three persons
consequently Mike felt rather ''jubus." He
didn't want to call for help, for he was naked
and the nearest place from which any assistance
could arrive was the meeting house, which was
at the time filled with worshipers, among whom
was the gal Mike twas paying his devours
to-" So he dodgeG the bull as the animal came
at MIN, and managed to catch him by the tail.
lie was dragged round till nearly dead and
when he thought he couldn't hold on any longer,
he made up his mind that he had better
" holler." And now We will let him tell his
story:
So, looking at the matter in all its bearings. I
cum to the conclusion that I'd better let some
one know whar war. So gin yell, louder
than locomotive whistle, and n warn't long
before seed the deacons two dogs comm
down like as if they war seein which could get
thar first. l knowd who they were arter-
they'd jine the bull agin me. So seys |, old
Drlnuie, US rlnln Is as cheap as Walkln on this
route, if you've no objections, I'll iist take
deck passage on that back O. yourn. So
wasn't very long getting astride of him then, if
you d bin thar, you'd have sworn thar warnt
nothin human in that mir, the sile flew so or
fully as the critter and | rolled round the field
one dog side and one on the other tryin
to cluch my feet. | prayed and cussed and
cussed and prayed, until couldn't tell which l
did last-and neither warn't of no use, they war
so orfuly mixed.
Well, | reckon | rid about half an hour this
way, when old Briudle thought it war time to
stop to take in supply of wind and cool off
little. So when he got round to a tree that
stood thar, he naturally halted. So sez /, old
boy, you'll loose one passenger sartain So
just clumb up branch kalkeatin to roost till
starved afore I'd be rid round that ar way any
longer. l war making tracks for the top of
the tree, when heard sunthin maxim orful
buzzin overhead, kinder looked up, and if thar
want-well, thars no use a swearin-but it
war the biggest hornets nest ever built. You
gin IN now reckon Mike, cause thar's no help
for you. But an idee struck me that | stood
heap better chance ridn the bull than whar
war. Sez |, old feler, if you II hold on, III ride
to the next station anyhow, let that be whar it
will.
So jest draped abord him agin, and looked
aloft to see what had gained by changin quar-
ters and, gentlemen, I'm q liar if thar warn
nigh half bushel of the stingin varmnts ready
to pitch into me when the word go " was gin.
Well, reckon they got it, for " all hands
started for company. Some on EN- bit the
dogs-about quart struck me, and the rest
charged on 3rindle.
This time the dogs led off fust, dead beat for
the old Deakens, and as soon old Brindle and
/ could get under way we followed, and as was
only a deck passenger, had nothin to do with
steering the craft swear, if had we shouldn't t
have run that channel anyhow. But as said
before, the dogs took the lead-Brindle and
next, and the hornets dre'kly arter. The dogs
yellin. Brindle bellerin, and the hornets buzzin
and all a sailin-
from the house, and the Deacon heard US cumin
and he cum out. | seed him hold up his hands
and turn white; recken he was prayin then,
for he didn't expect to DE called for so soon, and
it warn't long neither, afore the whole congre-
gation-men, women and children-cum out
and then all hands went to yellin. None of EN-
had the fust notion that me an0 Brindle belonged
to this world jest turned my head and passed
the whole congregation. seed the run would be
up soon, for Brinde couldn't turn an inch from
q fence that stood dead head. Well, we
reached the fence, and went ashore over the
old critters head, landin cawhallop on t'other
side, and lay thar stunned.
1t warnt long afore some of EN- as was not
scared, cum runnin to see what it war; for all
hands kalkalated that the bull and 1 belonged
together. But when Brindle walked off by him
self they seed how it war; ; and Que of EN- said
Nike Finck has got the worst of the serum
mage once in his lifei''
Gentlemen, from that day I dropped the
courtln business, and never spoke to q gal since,
ana when my hunt is up ON this yearth, there
non De any more Fincks and it's all OWN to
deacon Smiths brindle bull