The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 1850-1873, 1869-09-10
The Perils Of Drinking Bad Whisky.

Many years ago, Wnen the otate Oh
Georgia was in its infancy, one of the
Circuit Judges was Bella Brown, an ances.
tor of the recent "secesh" Governor OF
that name. He was man OF ability and
integrity, but like good many distin-
guished persons of that day, he loved a
social glass; and whenever the members of
the bar would turn in and help, he some
times drank to excess and became glorious
ly fuddled. On one occasion, while travel
ing on circuit, he reached the village of
Dayton, in Dooly county, where the court
was to be opened next day, and took quar-
tiers with relative of his wife, that lady
accompanying him. After supper Judge
Brown strolled over to the only tavern in
the place, kept by one Sterritt, where he
met q number of his legal friends A con-
vivial evening was passed; drinks fire.
quently went round, and somewhere about
midnight, the Honorable Bella was in a
state of rind quite the reverse of that i'm
piled by the old saw, "Sober as Judge"
When he was leaving for home, one of the
young lawyers, ina spirit of mischief, slyly
passed some spoons from the tumblers into
the Judges pocket
On dressing himself next morning, the
eccentric official, putting his hand into his
pocket, was greatly perplexed in discover
ing three or four silver spoons.
any Cod Polly" said he to his wife,
"just look here; l believe I've stolen some
of Sterritt's spoonsi"
"Let's see them," says the wife. eyes,
sure enough-here's his veritable initials
Pray how did you happen to have them in
your pocket!"
al think must have been drunk when
/ came home, wasn't II" inquired the
Judge.
Eyes" replied the devoted Polly, "you
know your old habit when you get among
those lawyers"
Certainly; 1 can understand easy
enough how it all came about. That fel-
low, Sterritt, keeps the meanest liquor in
the State; but 1 never supposed that to
drink it would make man steal!"
The spoons were duly returned to the
landlord, and the Judge went and opened
his court, thinking no more about the mat
ter. Several days elapsed, and the bust
ness of the court was drawing to close
when one morning rough-looking custo-
mer was arraigned before his Honor fol
larceny. He pleaded guilty, but said in
mitigation that he was drunk at the time
of committing the offence.
"What is the nature of the charge
against the MANI" inquired Judge Brown
"Stealing money from the till at Ster'
ritt's tavern" replied the clerk.
Young man" said the Judge, solemn
ly, "are you sure You was intoxicated
when you took this moneys"
"Yes, your Honor, was so jolly drunk
that things looked like they were dancing
double shuttle, and when l went out doors
the ground kept coming up and hitting
me on the head"
"That will do" replied the Judge
"But tell me, did you get all the liquor
you drank at Sterritt's 2"
every drop of it, your Honor"
"And so you got tipsy on his liquor, and
then stol his money ?"
"That's it exactly; didn't know what
1 was doing"
Turning to the prosecuting attorney, the
worthy magistrate said: This is most
extraordinary case, Mr.. Attorney, and one,
think, demanding the clemency of the
Court. You will, therefore, do me the
favor of entering noLe PROSE-. That
liquor of Sterritt's, have reason to know,
is mean enough to make a man do any
thing dirty. got drunk on it myself, the
other night, and stole all his spoons. II
Sterritt will sell such abominable stuff, he
ought not to have the protection of this
Court. You may release the prisoner, Mr..
Sheriff-Georgia Constitutionaltst.