The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1869-01-24

fAHiS, Jun. o, IooS
There few very false positions to maintain in
society. One Ia to be invited out to q s0ree with
ones oldest maiden aunt and hear a fat nunky an
nounce her as ones wife. while crowd of pretty
girls titerng and looking at you with astonish
ment Another is to Introduce friend (who never
knows where to spend his evenings to charming
family Of which one has long not only been
the hero, but almost an accepted sutton for
the only daughter and then In no time to find said
friend welcomed as lover by SAID daughter OF course
the false position but increase In discomfort
until the wedding, when the climax is unbearabe,
Us one has to appear as brdegroom's man for the
sake OF appearances. These are but two instances,
but they are requent for where Is the OLD maid who
at some time or other, has not manGuvred to make
believe she is a Mrs., and where the friend who has
not taken advantage of ones benevolent bumps,
standing out they do like horns for others 10 lead
man byY Wheres inquire and continue. My false
position occurred the last day OF the old year, or
the 3lst December 1868. was at my rooms, which
were Uttered with numerous white packages, both
large and small and tied up with red tape
need not say they were etrenaies. or New
Years gifts and after having cast up figures
was in one OF those brown studies men do fall into
when they to the conclusion that their expen-
dture totally outsrips their incomes butt as they say
to themselves on these festive OCCASIONS what is to
be donep-presents must be given. In Paris one can
no more dine at q lady's house once in twelve
month without offering her bOnboanisre on New
Years day. than one can avoid looking like
laden donkey under the numerous parcels that nave
to be carried about until New Years day is over
was therefore, reviewing what had purchased dis
contentedy; and before go on may as well say
what were the items selected according to the
taste OF the times we live in. The Etrusco mania
having subsidized a little uhe mania OF vermon
rrith n win rnfca md lam
theml had preferred the new hardware Juror
the Henry H. china, 1t is caled-Medlcis tea SER
vices known as stete-a-teten because only for two,
and need not say they are more difficult to get
with an authentic mark (the two entwined Ls) than
to pay for. Old Saxony and old Sevres are alone
admissible this year where these other authentic
brands are not visible. had, consequently, plenty
Of ancient crockery. had also been grand in out
lay on Louis XIV. clocks candesticks, artistic cabi
net tribes and fans, the latter very elaborate water
coored paintings on white silk, with Vatican graces
and innocence under every FOLDED leaf. j had also
invested In cnameled pendants for tine throat and
ears, this being the only jewelry much cared Tor,
the different articles laid before me In various ena-
mel stores saw many objects OF art truly deserv-
ing OF art illustration and the caisel some OF ,ne
logical figures set in pearls and hung In ngnt chains,
are the most harmonious ornaments that could
dangle from white satin skin. Then there was
variety Of bronze, too casts from models at Rome,
Venice and Florence being preferred as we are all
Medici-I may as well say mediclnzed Never
either had leather, especially Metternich green had
such run. l had, like all others, fallen on the
lesser articles OF this description with gratitude.
Such Russian morocco as | never saw, made up
In writing desks, portfolios, tobacco boxes, purses,
portemonnaies, card cases, almoner pouches chate-
lanes, and even watches Ii IL all the fashion.
Paras0l handles, too must not be forgotten, handles
inlaid like Cora Pearls with precious stones.
chosen and the result OF my survey, resume the
history OF my final false position last Thursday night
nut down the total outlay and had buttoned up my
feelings under overcoat, ready for plunge OF
oblivion down the Boulevards. The note was
brought In and ran follows :--'Mr. Ts+ Il really
cainot crafty ladies with my name) is requested to
attend the High Tribunal OF Justice. as witness
against the Fashion OF 1sos who Is accused OF divers
misdemeanors. She Will be sentenced or acquitted
the stroke OF twelve. 3ist OF December The jury
and witnesses will meet ut ten In the Hall OF Sights
who had been FASHIONS prime secretary for whole
year had TO witness against her. Wolsey,
cardinals, all OF We santed who have served your
soveregns better than your -, oh ! thought
thus, pulled my hat down over my eyes, locked up
all my presents and did not stop TIL came TO the
Hall OF Sights where all former MISTRESS judges
and enemies accusers and epid friends were thicky
gathered. We all went into the adjoining hall OF
Judgment aud there Fashion sat graspng the Of
her chair and pale, though painted When remem-
be,ed what she had been at the opening o. the des
auburn brown toilet ana rounded cheek when ]
remembered her without any crinoline In summer
70 clinging and mermaid-like under streaming hair
and now viewed her with dromedary bump out
behind ana lot OF false hair tied up in bow on
the top Of her forehead, could not make up my
mind that she was the same, and somehow It
seemed natural for me 10 go over 10 her accuscrs
feel squeamish Just then; for after all II men had
not encouraged her freaks would she have been SIT
| ting thereS But had encouraged herr No; had
reasoned with her and II was not until | found
| she could not understand argument that let her
goa thing every man has to do. a. he has Ito co.
himself, and that to the dogs-for the name Of the
| arch iend is called swearing.
The Judge read out the accusation, which Fashion
listened to attentivcly, now and then raising her
| smelling bottle TO her nostrils very calmly. II was
not until she was desired 10 clear herself that she
rose with her asca,s o led dignity and made few
transient very. Gentlemen she said, ''the worst
Of the accusations against me is that have through
the influence OF dress, perverted society. deny It,
am going to put few ideas before
| my case IL too short for my perfect acquittal.
want TO know why men look for morals In women's
cs espseS our rm ss n
cases or their own garmenfss II we were to wear
sackcloth would men be any betters ! maintain
they would not ls not Victorien Sardous hero
Inc seraphine, the "Devote- the most Immoral type
ever heard OF, and IN robes Of contntionf am fast
test par OF the other world, because have tried to
please my father. husband aud brothers by looking
fathers 6asbsnds, or recognzed II brothers. other
here Fashion looked rerroachiuJ at melt maintain
Ss b ea, sse 70, does non
love, best OF al things, the lovely crepe de chine
winch cousin Fred has smuVpled over from India
Tor herr and where IL the cousin Pred who would not
5lnugge u back again for OF the girls bright
glancess That Is a home feeling Where Is the
father VINO does not love 10 toss up cbuckling
BABY IN cloud " white lacef And as far AZ art In
concerned, do not mammas study isupcn's cheru.
BIN with SUGGEST Where the bridegroom or young
| husband who ~ not Kept at home instead Of club
bling and racing u his bride looks tempting in quilted
cashmere neglige and Pompadour rosettesY
| "But the MIND, the mindn you say. women OF
| taste ana FASHION are 40 hollow you complain.
| Wen, gentlemen, take taste away from your own
selves. those or you who have u, and you will find
you rseves caverns In which roomy emptiness de-
| posted. lou TAX OF expense, outlay, money NJ II
your own follies did not cost double: your boats,
| horses, gambling; your drinking smoking and re-
| yelling. Know that the really fashionable woman
| turns every thread 70 account defeats cracks In
| gloves, changes old into nevis always turning and
| making something pretty out Of nothing The aris-
tocratic parvenue alone is nslpdly stupidity extra
| VACANT, because she has no education Fashion Is
idea, not outlay. And now, Tor feel very faint
| gentlemen look at me- am a wreck. OveTwheIm