Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1869-04-14
LONDON THIEVES our DONE.
John Rail Yields the Palm TO a West
ern story Teller.

An Englishman travelling on the Mis-
.sissippi told saVeral rather ROACH stories
about London thieves. A Cincinnati
chap, named Case, heard these narra~
tives with a silent but expressive
"humph," and then he remarked that
he, thought the Western thieves beat
the London operators all hollow.
How so? inquired the EnglishmaD,
with surprise. Pray, sir have you lived
much in the West?
Not great deal l undertook to set
up business at Des moines Rapids
awhile ago, but the rascally people
stole nearly every thing l had, and final
ly a Welsh miner ran off with my wife,
Gracious said the Englishman, and
have you never heard from her 2?
ENeVer to this day. But that was not
the worst Of it.
Worst What would be worse than
stealing a mans wife?
Stealing the children, l should say,
said the implacable Case.
Children
= Yes. A niger woman who had none
of her own abducted my youngest girl
and absconded and jined wild tribe Of
Injuns.
Did you see her
See her ? Yes, she hadn't ten rods
the start fine, bat plunged in the lake
and swan off likea duck, and there
wasn't canoe to follow her.
The Englishman leaned back in his
chair, and called for another mug of 'alf
and 'alf, while Case smoked his cigar.
shan't go any further West, think
at length observed the excited John
Bull.
l should not advise any one to go, said
Case, quietly. My brother once lived
there, but he had to leave, although his
business was the best in the country.
What business was he in, pray?
Lumberipg-had sawmill.
And they stole his lumber?
Yes, and saw logs, too.
Saw logs?
Yes; whole dozens of black walnut
logs were spirited off or carried away in
a single night. He tried every way to
prevent it; had men hired to watch his
logs, but it was no use. They would
whip them away as easily as if there had
been nobody there. They would steal
them out Of the cove and even out Of
- Good e! graclOus
Just to give you an idea how they
steal out there-did you ever work in a
ssWmill?
Never.
Well, one day my brother bought an
alfred fine black walnut lOg-four feet
three, and not a knot in it. He was de-
termined to keep that log anyhow, and
hired two cauny Scotchman to watch it
all night. Well, they took a small dem
John of whisky with them, snaked the
log up the side of the hill above the mill,
built fire and then sat down to play
cards. Just to keep them awake, you see.
Twas a monstrous big log-bark two
inches thick. Well, as | was saying,
they played cards and drank whisky all
night, and as it begun to grow light,
went asleep astraddle Of the log. About
minute after daylight, George went
over to the mill to see how they were
getting along, aud the log was gone
What were the Scotchmen doing?
Sitting on the bark. The thieves had
driven an iron wedge into the butt end,
which pointed down hill, and hitceed a
yoke Of oxen on and pulled it right out,
leaving the shell, and the Scotchers sit
ting astraddle of it, fast asieepl
The Englishman here arose, dropped
his cigar stump into the spittoon, took a
look at his watch, and said he thought
he'd 90 on deck and see how far he'd be
down the river before morning.