St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1869-07-02
Che farm and Garden.
An Invttation to Farming.


MIR. Bonner, proprietor of the n. Y
Ledger, presents the humorous side o
amateur farming. 1t would do for othe
than amateur farmers to read:
PEEKsKILL, May p, 1869.
My dear Mr.. Bonner,-I cannot i'm.
aglne the reason that a man like vou
should stick to the city 1t is true that
you had place in the country-have
you sold it?-but that place had toe
many owners. You held it in common
with Miasma. Two proprietors never
do well in running the same farm, unless
they are perfectly agreed and, if | re-
member Alright, you never lived at peace
with chills and fever. l hardly blame
you. There is no moderation in the
thing. You are always at extremes.
In fact, Miasma is an unpleasant fellow
out of doors, and still less agreeable in
the house. If you have sold out, con-
gratulate you.
But because you failed in one country
farm, there is no good reason why you
should not succeed in another Go
further away from the city. Go to the
upper part of Westchester county, and
somewhat away from the river. and you
shall find round and beautiful hills, rich
intervals, pure water, charming outlooks.
and very kind and intelligent popula-
ton. 1t is time tor you to get off the
pavements. They grind men terribly
fast. There is no mercy in them, day
or night.
Come to the country. If you cannot
do better, | will give you an interest in
my farm. There are thirty-six acres.
That is more than | can manage and do
it Justice. We will carry it on jointly.
| will lay out and superintend the work
and you shall pay the bills.
by the way, there is some humor con-
nected with farming. The newspapers
inform me that own model farm, and
that | derive large profit from farming
SO do. But it is profit in the higher
faculties, and not in the pocket A
gentleman from Baltimore wrote to me
rs follows
Dear Sir,-l see by the papers that
your farm netted TO you last year thirty
six thousand dollars. VIII vou tell me
what crops you raise, and what is your
method | have farm of two hundred
acres near this city, and | have never vet
been able TO make it pay expenses. VIII
you tell me how | can make it rs profit
able rs YOURS ''
replied, (though | never sent it,
''Dear Sir,-Don't change a particle.
Keep on Just rs you have done. and
your farm and mine will be as like as
two peas. Your farm is already just as
profitable as mine. Truly yours"
In fact, Mr.. Bonner. the profits of
farming are such that | am anxious for
Il moneyed partner. To man who
earns good deal OF money in the city.
who is afraid of growing stingy and
wants something to keep him generous.
who takes literary pleasure in drawing
checks, and who never looks at.a bill eN-
cept 10 see the amount. | can give the
utmost satisfaction. Yet | am obliged
10 confess that the chance Is not as good
now rs il was few years ago. The
Improvements are nearly finished The
rough work is all done. The orchards
and vineyards are coming into bearing,
and who knows but the farm will make
both ends meet yet Hitherto every
body has made money OH it, except the
owner. | am often asked, what is your
>urest crop? | answer, bills, But
even that crop may fail. In loag ro-
tation may yet raise bills receivable.
instead OF bills payable. 1t is only fair
to state these possibilities, lest capital
ist desirous of keeping pecGniary pores
open should be disappointed. But this
will guarantee. If you will take hold
with me, | will, if there is danger of the
farms paying, set on foot such improve
menis as will keep down your pockets TO
any extent.
1t isa matter of surprise how much
money may be buried in small piece Of
ground. Indeed, many gentlemen are
surprised Simple as II smiling piece OF
ground looks, as it lays before your con-
templative eyes, it will prove match
for you in cunning. To drain it, (and
every piece of ground wet or dry should
be underlaid with drain tile.) to deepen
it, (and no farm except mere sand is we'll
ploughed that has not been mellowed
eighteen inches deep,) to gather off the
stones, to dig out the bouldcrs, and blast
the rocks, to lay boundary walls, to en-
rich the whole with abundance of ma
nurc, but above all, do a goodly amount
ofgrading, grading will prevent any
man from boarding his money
Then one must take account of work
done twice over and thrice over, because
you did not know how TO do it righ: the
first time. Drains two feet deep, that
must 20 down four feet: trees set down
where you don't want them and moved
to where you don't want them either,
and moved again fancy crops, by which
mean crops from seed for which YOU pay
extravagant prices, whose yield is in in
verse ratio to the descriptions upon
which you bought; these together with
experimental manures, and new machines
for saving labor, and newer machines,
and machines still newer, will give one
an agreeable relaxation if ,he is fond of
spending his money.
But if man is conceited, and desires
to be brought to realizing sense of his
proper place in creation, L advise him TO
attempt grading. Grading is the art of
recreating the world. 1t makes valleys
where nature made hills. 1t makes hills
where the ages have made valleys Il,
changes northern slope into Il southern
one. II smoOthcs off the undulatinu
face OF grounds, us a tialiron takes out
the wrinkles and creases of sheet or
tablecloth. One has no idea how thor