, 1869-08-30
MARK TWAIN,
His Exploits nt SlRgnrn.
From thf TuFdt, Eturtss

TIE f"''""'na 'e:es!am sspsn, i.sst: =.
:" borrowed Jenkins veluc,pc.ic, aul t,1e,, III.
f'ark rniM performance nrtF Niagara, hui II n
nn!s par,ta! ~urcrsa harr sni 10 the ,.stl,I,c
twG hundred and twenty feet n|msc Inc river, al
veil nj jrnk!ns or my nlf1rr r,an rsulI U f. t,,t
eailIlt en anF furthrr stoFrt Ike that ut',rr
a. !" !'a.r M't GFt.n1. iakr.t n can't gel htr
etAftttl aEaff caifut ari np Hr gu tlral /
hasr '"tn rnsiIs,r itet v"+t tt4sr, ~, r1ri, n,
mat er Il tph."n hmlrs INV III ,,s,'jps, +: i,
sSnsp'aH s '" Sssfsr*'i pot lssii.n Il ''! spp,s s
sf,m-r'n. enI snrA things t"rau.a tas, TIKI, TIKI
tn~'rr. 1h"t have t'sn INT et"tll"a \ rtp"l ,Irai
Hum nin rn!nr IN ptt mi NJ shls1 nsrn ,,4,,t,
ensiY h'.,' i"nr tt;"lsh-i w!.'' - spar.ri tl"
Ia, u r,stn 's"'e ,' v" 90 ''s' ''7''
"r, 1""a N, ss'ets ~ ,M7 i'nsp.e ras
II ~: t.tt" arr, it, sstl !. n.",t1 l." n G",i
~ t"' 'i s@,n' It as'' '"..' mi trl. r,s,.h:
'e*4 S%;. .5 ""5'F1 &. ;:'y' III: ~! - I i
th!s aus, ~ si,A, sM.rInsu W
"nh'n4st. i, Attim,,f,
"hs"t1.t. E.,"...,4
t+",. II. k"sAy.tt. t-r4...
!7t4 sr's" Is - tfnlty n.lf",,iY ..d,lIt,nl .tea-
lsahit II II "rJa tHlIIalt l5n,tfAl va sbn,Ll w.
}"s y '."1n !hu lss, lAt,n h u as4l.t hisi"ii.
n"h ~ .ufhr'iE'l With ihu stas'lIsslit Ut ttta
''rat4't Ii !14t VII .tshas trnss gu!ts w iltuJ.
ealing Au tlla sHlrHGsll llsGif.
hen Matt H. ali! I'unHth thrn lna Establish.
iLrht al1n r!!tTt1 IN III cslil"1al dulrs, II Hrgk
w" eltHftia}, he hFnfa y "rlatf,IrIu !" ucItIup
'lnn u lila ilT'IH:IIGs ai tlG II srl,oIt, In "a m.
i,al *A', which sselnn'i Pheasant h,rlssfI,.n on
t, t "''.s' .,.,, mot" n essa,ax sdt'a,l.! ls.
ourselves lhciu.ca. Ne even wrnt ~ u'sIsi Ia
~ TO p!i,llAh his ''sslutn1ory," AMI jrn.arIy
TenArkr,t To ntArI Thrtlhrrs NJ the tHLaT h,T
SAlnah" vi uu iar, n1E !IUl'uo nclnhtrr hAi re-
rtht'l Il! one Who eYtncel such playful spirit
While entering With ea!nr..r.. ason Tie ariuos
n ahA
S!lcA bthkatfuua d.. the following were inter.
sIaEacd LII tst platform:
- ! au snnp'y going TO ito NY plain, unp.eten,l-
ne, When cal.hot Grt uut Of II; l shatt work
diligently anh huuestly mud faithfully III n!l
tneA aud upon A otcaslpuA when f4rtsuliup mud
want shall cunpel 1nc to io Ii; III writing. shall
ccpt When II Il attended with Inconvenience
II apreaE1 that the Other proprietor AMI mem.
leEs u The stat u the utsalo Rrtrt~. tnok ihi.
poE1lon Of The rlh'iulm as those W nom the paper
reached. thnkiug It WEE \ cxpltaa :Jokc and
would materially ai1 tho reputation u their or.
Eaa .c Twnn .5 hi ID ssen on7 psy well through
hut since It WAS certain that Professor jenkins
would attempt 70 cross Niagara lytr on seloc,-
drsic5 toward Ic,leffness, aud Wr,inessay morn.
Ing surprised The editorial asafr by the announce
nient TINT "he gucsteti he'd 70 aoru and scc
Itnk!nH fan tnth the river, II the nF1n you'll raT
his cxfcnsea" With many 1ntsslYinss the
nJm agreed 10 do so. II thes were moderate.
Twain ttsred; he arnTed al Niagara: he footed
tol'e: he dead hended ~ member OF the pr.sx.
lie went to the hotel before jenkins crossed thr
fnpc and took :l,uncs. with amazement the wait
err watched him. ~ he saf on q Chair, md
dangling bis legs, awunp them continuously, 10 as
10 shakc down and enable him to absorb greater
when jenkins hal successfully crossc,s on nls
refoc.re1c, Twain watched and esnsnineti curious
T. he :s,d.snapes. ,usehlne. m Il scenes, easy to
mounted and .ho: ont upon the tieh.cneti
strAntl- All went Oh handsomely. The crowd
about dispensing, :eassemble-i. and thought they
were 10 receive another instalmenr Of pay for the
Eoncy dspnsi'ed. When the centre II inc rope
| Eas rrachera Marx Twain was Unable either to
reee,e or advance The rope r4a np at an angle
Of twenty. .1se degrees either way and it was all
Folniely Impossible for him to move Ills PcSasus
.luck. When the crowd o1,sersel his dilemma,
| there WAS a continuous cheer hud waving Of
| handkeschlefs Marx Twa,u shook his nst men
| tunnItuens ehent rent The yesy n,r.
At thls tine Fcsy hcayr thunceI.shower cane
| un Arh drove the rror.e to cnyer but Marx vas
c1rcsFd to the fury OF the c!emcuts. Br frantic
! effort hr managed 10 more the machine about q
foot, INT tore his trousers cx tho whole length,
and baeked 10th Of them from the tat u.cd 10
promote fnctlon Between the wheels and rope
Inc wind carried away bis hat, and IN the war
| Of the elements he became a pit.fll object as
BE-. BE- ns,.resately 1, he'd % on % tne ropc When
| an IRON r'ne.. that he MAS drawn IN II
WIS known that ne wns 1r1m the nuuA!o
E1Irrss. but nouc Of thotc ptrfent sccmed to
| know Ahu he WAS. AH he pccdetl nex suit and
| was much exhausted! he could not Ec; hack to
| ltnf7Alp The same night, ana 70 tclcxraphcd IN
attempted joeulauts the above message. In
stead Of attempting 10 play on this miserable Joke
| upnn The trrotter, Marx would hare done better
| lraninlly 10 havc owned uP. How can tho pro-
pr,ttorr or public tt1s, him Agnlh. His deelsra-
t'un tn "teli the truth, except when !! incou-
| vrnirnt." was not a joke; ~ when the other
rrn1,,esosr g,rr him some more stamps, ne viii
cut np q similar shine. and rrrscyr.r Ii neglect
duty mil Iosrc't to attend from "Tr!saitou and
| hUnHcE."