Fayette County herald. [volume] (Washington [Washington Court House], Fayette County, O. [Ohio]) 1860-1???, 1869-05-06
Mr. Wlking On iYelocIpedee.

II Mr.. wilkins on Velocipedes
(. 'But, wilkins, -" 4 ~.
: II tell you, Mrs. wilkins Ii
II not going to have it; so you ma
J. as well make up your mind to tbs
q at once. No woman shall ever z
prancing around this communit
o. on velocipede while she's a wifi
Of mine if I can help It; SO yor
can iust take that old pair of wheel
n you .bfoughts home and gladdeI
the heart of some kindling.woot
man with them, for ride on then
you don't; if you do I'm a Dutch
: man; there ~ ~ fhaH'I
MI. Wilkins, you know II
J "No, 4 don't know anything o.
the kind Do you think I'm going
to let such q looking woman as you
dress up in Bloomers and mount q
high hat and go around trying to
show off that flgureY' , /"
Mr.. Wilkins!
go struggling around the thor
oughfares of this town, looking
like an old beer eask propped upon
two legs, and showing those ancles,
which are so Trick that you could
mot get one Of them through the
equator?" Jrss-.fal .555f
wilkins, I'll Scratch
"Well, / should think not And,
besides, / don't know whereabouts
on this terrestrial globe you expect
to find any wheels strong enough
to bear you. You'd smash a pair
of cast-iron caF-wheels into smith
Greens, the minute you sat down on
them, you would. The best thing
you can do is to walk, and on the
ground, too, where the crust Of the
earth isn't thin; or else sit,in front
of a fire and melt down your aver
dupois. " a-a a,Je 20 .ajis h.o saj a
"Mr wilkins, you're perfectly
scandalousp
"But I'm not going to put up
with it. 1don'I intend to have you
Topping around town on a velociy
pede, and very likely falling off and
breaking your bones, and then have
a lot ofdoctors coming to my house
and making post mortem} examina-
tons, and saving you up, and dis
covering things with hard Latin
names in your lungs, and in your
liver, and your physique generally.
Well, Ishould think notl It's bad |
enough to have to submit to you
now. without having your gore split
around over the carpet and a parcel
Of saW7bones blaspheming at your
anatomy" 7r9g O.
Wilkins, amt you ashamed to
talk soiT' aa-.a..aj st ss.-
Il want you to understand that
if you ride that velocipede / will
sue for a divorce, | don't believe
in woman exercising her muscles
on any such contrivance. You'daI
good deal better get scrubbing
brush and gosdown and tackle the
front door steps with some sand
and a chunk of soap" 1A |o 'a
."Mr.t Wilkins, if you'll only listen
to :" y 'a
''Or else practice carrying coal /
'cuttle up and down stairs every 6 I
minutes all day. But as for the \
mother ofa family, and a fabby old G
girl Of your years, undertaking to /
'ide velocipede-why, it's simply Q
idiculous." q 3a41 b#.
"Mr. Wilkins, -" sgaH eia1
"The next thing ! know, I sup
lose you will be parading yourself :
n the papers as Madame Wilkins, !
he Champion YeIocipedist,' and !
unning mile heats on the Nichol- +
on pavement for hundred dollar
'urses, best two out of three. "A !
'eautiful speetacle-Won't it be p =
Ind then / suppose you will want i
ne to bet on you, and back you up; !,
'ut not one cent do you get-noti =
single, solitary red Do you sup .
'ose | am going to throw away my v
Iard-earned money on such a fanatr 4
c as you? Well, l should think
lot. l would not put up a dol /
ar on you if I was worth untold 4
illions. | am not proud Of you; !.
want you to distinctly understand !,
lat.n .9le-im 81 Aag.g vgla 4
"Mr. Wilkins, that's all non !
,nse." Bed i'R 7ass n'ai 4
"And a pretty example you are y
sting to your children. Here, h,
My yesterday, H6lofernes Mont al
omery made velocipede out of
70 -four barrels, and when he and tbb
z..tA .f..a i = =. ~. l.. y