The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1869-02-11
From, the Scranton Republican.
MIR. WHACKHAMMER'S LECTURES.
Woman's Rights-and Other Rights.

W0manS RlghtS--and Otner Rights.
NO. l.
The Lecture system, though more of
public character than it used to be, is no
new thing. The neoest part is the fact
that lecturers are now paid for their ef-
| forts, whereas Mrs. Caudle, the inventor
of the system, a1,oays lectures free, with
an occasional personal hit" thrown in.
Perhaps, too, that to this same Mrs Cau-
die belongs the honor of introducing the
theory of woman's rights, of which we
hear so much in these latter days. She
always stood up very determinedly to con-
tend for her own rights, and there is no
doubt but she intended to be represen-
tatiye woman. know she is not usually
received as such, because she never put
in her claim, but as she always contend
ed for her points whenever she feared
those points were in danger, hurrying
| things sometimes with bound of alacrity
only equaled by double spring jack
knife. But believe in woman's rights,
she had right to hurry, if she didn't
hurry anybody else unreasonably by run
ming against them.
To my mind the woman's rights ques-
tion was settled long ago.
'If she will she will, you may depend upon it,
lfshe won't she won't, and there's an end ont"
There is truth in that poetry, and
good deal of it. Paul says, Cali things
are lawful for me, but all things are not
expedient." This comprehends my views
of women's rights. If voting, politics
would elevate her, would say let her
vote let her dabble in politics /; run for
constable or Governor, and let her get up
high generally. If she is going to remain
the pure, tender, weaker one, so natural
" inclined to lean to the man for pretec-
ton, succor, comfort, let her 60 out from
the nursery, the kitchen, the drawing
room, to jostle with the crowd around the
polls, and then let her come back to her
deserted home and feel guilty and asham-
ed. Not confidence enough in man to do
this outdoor work ! You don't deserve
man. Politics contaminatc. You are no
stronger to resist evil than man, and he
has been totally overcome, transferred in
to rascal before he knew it. You can
be bad enough without voting, if that is
your inclination. IF you are ambitious
to make your mark, there are several 9th
er ways in which you can make marks
that would be more to your advantage and
the great family to which you being
| You were not made to wear trousers,
though we accede the right to wear coats,
and there is no use crying after the per-
| quisities. We men must be allowed
| few things in common or we will be un-
sezed, not you. Now we are looking to
your very best and highest interest but
were we tenderly to acquiesce to the de-
mands of some of your selfstyled leaders
we would soon all be in the shade of the
kitchen and drawing room, and-oh, how
funny-in the nursery telling mother
goose stories, and such infantile literature,
whilst you would be outside battling with
the cold world, where there was none
ready to jump up and given you soft
seat, no strong coat sleeve to bear yon
through dangerous places, no heavy boots
to beat path for you. Oh, you would
find this colder world than you ever
dreamed Of You are having very good
times now. Think little before you
/ would throw these to the winds, for you
may reap wirlwind that will uproot all
your hopes and upset things generally.
Outside of the family there is no more
appropriate place for woman than with
the children in the schools. The paren
tai feeling, the gentle voice, the moral in
clinations, all are especially adopted to
the training of youth. Whilst as teach
er woman is particularly in her place
there are hundred other spheres OF use
fulness open to her whenever she chooses
to take hold of them. That she is the
weaker sex, at least in physique, every
body must admit That she often as
umes weakness for purpose or strategy is
also patent, but she always expects the
best things We have used her so we'll
that we have ourselves made her quite
selfish We gave the finger, with our
heart, and now she wants the whole hand,
head, and body. We must protest. We
want to be indulgent, as We always have
been we want to please her we will eat
most any kind of an apple that she may
hand to US, but this very suspicious look
ing fruit we must decline. We decline
not so much for our own good as for the
good of posterity. We remember Adam
and would not commit a like indiscretion
whereby the fingers of all posterity would
be pointed at us with reproach. Finally
ladies, desist, Mr.. Whackhammer is
against you, yet he is for you with all
his heart. He don't want to live without
your sympathy, for this is one of the com
mondities he lives oD. Forbear, you will
only create an "onpleasantness," whilst
there can be no secession. Desist, give
it up, forbear and let harmony prevail.
TCuApoD NuAcEII A,I,tER