Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1869-07-02
MIsCELLANEOUs ITEMS.

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A wooDRs wedding-Marrying block
head.
THE ties that connect business men with
the public -Adver.tise.
DENTIsT-One who finds work for his
own teeth by taking out those of other
| people.
A SUFFERER advises persons going over
the Union Pacific Railroad to take their
cold victusls with them.
IT is proposed TO get up grand fair in
Cincinnati to exhibit the manufactures of
the Mississippi Valley, VT
On his deathbed distinguished humor-
ist requested that no one be invited TO his
funeral Because" sighed the dying
wag, it's civility can never repay"
APARrY of Germans were fishing near
Lafay cite, Ind, when one of them caught
a large pike. The hook being fastened
down Its throat, one of them put in his
thumb to get 1t out, when the fish bit the
thumb off.
/ A PORTLAND school-house caught fire
the other day, and as the boys watched it,
one in another school said, enthusiastically
and honestly, to his companion, "Oh
Johny don't you wish 1t was our school
houseP"
A NEW BEDFORD Juror, who left his
horse tied to tree on going to court on a
recent Tuesday morning, suddenly recol
lected the fact on the next Thursday after
noon, and hastily applied to the court for
permission to go and look after his wei.
fare.
SIR HENRY RowLINsoN, the distin-
suished Arch9ologist, maintains that Baby
Ion is the site of the Garden of Eden, and
that the Babylonion documents now ex-
tant give an exact geographical descrip-
tion of the scene Of mans first disobe-
dience" ANA FT. rNgHE.
HENRY WARD BEEcHER invites Bonner
to come out aud take an interest in his
farm. He says he has thirty.six acres of
land, which is too much for himself alone.
1--WE will carry it on jointly" he tells
Bonneri "I viii lay out and superintend
the work, and you shall pay the bills"
A FRENCH duellist coming home from
his last meeting gave two Nspoleons to the
coachman. Many thanks; IL is a pleas,
ure to drive you out !" II beg your par
don, 1t is not for driving me out that
give you those two louis, it is for driving
me home again"
ONCE A WEEK reminds the world that
this is the centenary of the steam engine
A patent was granted to Watt in April,
1859. It is also the centenary of Hum
boldt, Cuvier, the first Brunei, yelling.
, ton, Soult and Ney, and the hundredth
, year since patent was granted to the
spinning jenny. .na
, DIR. TURNER, In one of the reports of
the Inebriate Asylum, speaks of three
i children which were born to habitually
' inebriate parents, and were all three idiots.
I | Afterwards these parents reformed, and
) lived temperately. several years, during
! which period OF temperance two more
4 children were born, and were active and
4 intelligent. Finally, the parents again
! fell into inebriety, and had two more chill
!. dren, both idiots.
1 A NEW HAMPsHIRR farmer, who had
q an invariably good-natured wife, longed
1 TO hear her scold for q change, and was
advised that load of croichety frewood
would make her very desirably cross.
!. He tried It, When the pile was gone he
asked If he should get such another sup
- ply. "Oh! yes," said she, "for that
crooked wood you brought before does lie
o around the pot 30 nicely"
A CLEVER old dame, who resides a
short distance from New York city, was
recently astonished by her husband, who
. came in hurriedly with the remark al
d have got present for your "A present
| b0yb ohC Wnbt 10 ~ 3 n
: tooth, brush" responded the old gent
n "What good will that do me--you know
| have not got tooth in my head p re-
}, torted his spouse. "Just the thing" re-
y piled the venerable joker, "there amt q
y bristle in it"
THE New Orleans Picdyuns relates
7 this book auction scene Gentlemen,
II cried an auctioneer at book auction, last
) evening, "I offer you"-seanning the title
II very closely" Shakspeare's works how
n much TO start them 7" "WhO are they
by :" inquired wag in the crowd. "rl
e tell you In a moment" was the reply, bu
d before he could refer, shout of laughter
y from the bystanders convinced him Of hil
o blunder.
:, A GERMAN chemist has discovered thai
II II morphia, which is sometimes used effec
tually to allay vomiting, be heated with
70 hydro-chloric acid, 1t will become the
q most powerful emetic known The effec
= Is produced by introducing small guam
:, tity under the skin, and sometimes by
!" Epilling II on the skin, but the vomiting
soon subsidies, and leaves no nausea. Th'
disc0Verer calls the new agent ememor
., phia.
m A CORRESPONDENT of the London Ies
10 graph thinks nobody knows how TO cool
Nd cOHeo Out tne NATIVES OF OeylOnB anu loll
rs how they dc it He says; "Thel
,e take the quantity OF coffee beans required
nj roast them in an earthen chasty or saucer
shaped pot, pound them in . pestle ant
At mortar, or bruise them between tw'
w stones then pass through sieve com
,e posed Of eoarse muslin; boiling water
AZ added, and the coffee Is made"
er A BAEKRUrT merchant, returning hom
one night, said TO his noble wife; = NJ
er dear, am ruined everything We have
II. in tho hands Of the sheriff" After feV
We moments Of silence, the wife looked ealml
le into his face and said win th
iy sheriff sell yOai" "Oh no" "Wll tn
or sheriff sell mef" "Oh no" "Win h
Sc sell our our children :" "0h, no." "The
do not say that we have Lost everything
"A AL that IL most valuable remains TO us
10 manhood, womAnhood, and childhoo(
a: We have lost but the results OF skill an
to industry. We can make another fortune
AZ If our hearts and hands are left ua," Ca
he We wonder chat, encouraged by such
ao noble wife, he Ia now On the road 70 fol
N tuner
A CURIOUS discovery has recently bee