Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1869-09-17
An Adventure at Niagara Falls.

MARK TWAIN met with quite an adven-
ture recently, at Niagara Falls. Crossing
to the Canada side, 'he sought the camp of
the Red Men who manufacture bead bags
and moccasins for the visitors, and made
them a speech, in which some remarks
upon their costume, and their habit OF
smoking short .dudheens appear to have
been 1hiscenstrued, and ordinations
broke forth Oh -Ginos -.o.-f. ,sss'r
50" Down wild himl'' ~
Scoop the .blagyard !'* @@''- &s,oS
>" Hang himip' fh 173# t.5F s7ta
"''Burn him I" = 4"i
"aDrownd him! 5..i - ~ Sian e
1t was the quickest operation that ever
was. simply saw sudden flash in the
air of clubs, brickbats, fists, bead baskets;
moccasins-a single flash, and they all ap--
peared to hit me at once, and no two of
them in the same place. In the next in
slant the entire tribe was upon me. They
tore 1alItherclothes off me, they broke my
arms and legs, they gave me thump that
dented the top Of my head till it would
hold Coffee like a saucer = and to crown
their disgraceful proceedings and add in
suit to- injury, they threw me over the
Horseshoe Fall and got wet.
About ninety or a hundred feet from
the top, the remains of my vest caught on
a. projecting rock, and l was almost
drowned before could get loose. / finally
fell, and brought up in q world of white
foam at the foot. of the Fan, whose celled
and bubbly masses lowered up several
inches above my head. OF course L got
into the eddy, | sailed round and round in
it forty -four times-chasing chip and
gaining on teach round trip a half a
understanding for the same bush on the
bank forty-four times, and just exactly
missing it by hairs breadth every time.
AT lasta man walked down and sat down
close TO that bush, and put pipe in his
mouth, and lit a match, and followed me
with one eye and kept. the other on the
match while he shelteTedsit in his hhand
from the wind. Presently puff Of wind
blew it out The next timeI swept around
he said:l ajGIs@eg is4ggoue ~
~ Got a match?'', ~ - - a4
;" Yes-in my other vest. Help me out,
please mn ~rrl,.,., i, 80. '.a
"Not for joe !. - !. 's'''' = - =
+ When CAME around again i said;
h " Excusethe seemingly impairment curl
osity Of drowning man, but will you ex-
plain this singular conduct of yours?'
with pleasure. / am the Coroner.
Don't hurry on my account, can wait
for you. But wish had match ,,oI
| said: "Take my place and FL go
and get you one" .g.-.-..,.tf
He declined. This lack Of confidence
on his part created atcoolness between us,
and from that time forward avoided him.
1t was my idea, in case anything happened
to me, to so time the occurrence as to
throw my custom into the hands of the op-
position coroner over on the American side.
At last a policeman came along and arrest
ed me for disturbing the peace by yelling
at people on shore for help. The Judge
fined me, but had the advantage of him.
My money was-with my pantaloons, and
my pantaloons were with the Indians.
Thus | escaped. am now lying in a
very critical condition. At least am ~
ing any way-critical or not critical 81.
i am hurt all over, but / cannot tell the
full extent yet, because the doctor is
not done taking the inventory. He will