Elizabeth daily monitor. [volume] (Elizabeth, N.J.) 1868-1880, 1869-04-15
8Itsabetb Daily @ 9
PUBLISHED AT 155 BROAD STREET, BY
J. MADISON DRAKE.
AN OLD MAIDS VIEWS.

takes very cheerful view of her social
situation in the Troy Times. Her views
will be of interest to many: 1t always
astonishes me when take realizing
sense of the fact that am an old maid !!
Why you will scarcely believe it, [ con-
fess that I once had lovers by the legion
and offers were as numerous as fiirtl-
tons are now a-days 1 was always in
love. | don't remember the time when
| had not some Willie or Frank to
dream about, and write love letters to,
and as l donned my long dresses, some
handsome Julius Augustus was sure to
keep my thoughts employed until ano-
ther with greater destinations superced
ed him. You need not imagine | regret
them now. No, indeed My life is a
pleasant one. No one annoys me. No
husband firts with other mems wives
or young girls, breaking my heart No
husband calls me "my love in CON-
pany and "old brute at home ! He
does not growl at milliners' bills or ex-
travagant wardrobes, He never sits
looking at me, wishing 1 were as hand
some as Mrs. B. or Miss j. He does
not wish my eyes were as divinely blue
and my hair as charmingly olded as
Kntie's over the way. He never casts
sly glances at pretty girls, throwing
them kisses when my back is turned.
He dosen't marvel how he ever came
to marry me, when there were 50 many
handsome women it the world. If am
ill, he is not wondering how weeds
would become him, and if he should be
obliged to have an expensive funeral. =
He isn't thinking what jolly widower
he'd make, and how eager Jennie F. is
to marry him, or how gladly Flora j
would lift up her bewitching brown
eyes and promise to be his He does
not complacently fondle his moustache
before the mirror, and think how every
one must pity him, and regret (girls es-
pecially) that SO handsome man should
be bound to so plain looking woman.
He isn't watching me continually to see
if 1 fulfill all my duties as a wife; to
criticise my every movements, to be an
noyed at'the weakness of the tea, the
toughness of the steak, or the lateness
of the breakfast. Thank the gods no
| am free woman. [ do as [ please, go
where [ please, think, BREATH sneeze,
wink, cough, sleep and eat as [ please
Old Mother Hubbard had her dog,
Dame Crump had her pig, but [ have
my cat , An intellectual animal. too,
one that has more natural intelligence
than many children. Tabby and [ en-
Joy ourselves in rational manner. She
never speaks q cross word neither do
I. Together we sit and think hours at
time. by the open gate, and draw great
morals from the fire within. Tabby
has quiet temperament and we never
quarrel. [ often hear people exclaim
that old maids are always gossips. Not
so. l don't care if Mary Jane has sto-
len another girls beau. / never feel
interested in the cost Of Susan's new
bonnet. or Jennie's silk dresses. [ do
not wonder that Mrs C-should be ex-
travagant, or Miss c. should fiirt so
much. What do [ care ? Tabby and
/ occasionally remark upon the folly
and stupidity of certain persons. but we
do not mention it out of urown family
My cat is not communicative, neither
am I.
Yesterday met one of my old low
ers. Once he praised my eyes, my
lips, the beauty of my hair, the fresh
ness of my manners. He protested to
love me, but he met a prettier girl and
/ a gayer young man, and so we parted.
He is married now, has a cross, faded
wife and seven children. He locks old
and weary. felt sorrow for him, but
1 smiled at my folly in ever wasting
one thought upon him. Would / give
up my folly life of an old man? My,
Never My hair is growing gray, but
I don't use Hair Restorative. My
face has some wrinkles in it, but |
don't use Bloom of YOUTH My fin
gers are not white and soft and dim
pied, but l do not battle them in "cold
cream" and wear old kids. I don't
tear out my hair with crimpers.
never wear long trails that sweep the
ground for half mile. / do not wear
humps on my back and double mp with
the fashionable &c Grecian bend" /
don't have to wear eye glasses and pre-
tend I am near sighted. am not oh
liged to wear butterfy's wing on my
head in February, freezing my ears I'M
til they are purple. L don't have to
go in low neck dresses nor howl opera
music until my throat is sore, nor
study attitudes before my mirror, nor
twist my tongue out endeavoring to
learn German, nor fall in love with my