The Ebensburg Alleghanian. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1865-1871, 1868-10-29
The Harmonious Brethren.
IN ONE ACT.

Banking House.
The HorEd-What what Can these
things be? Is't so that the chained light
ming, made to be mans swift messenger
brings us true tidings? Wallace, Wal
lace, you of Scottish blood, 'where is the
victory you promised US ?' o Indiana
o Ohio,
Wattace (demurely)-We did our best,
sirrah. We summoned to the holy task of
aiding our failing cause, coffee-pots innu-
merable, and dyed false papers in the
steaming fluid summoned false seals of
high iudicatories, and from the raw mate
rial, brought straight from Erin's isle,
made citizens, each one quicker than the
aspen's leaf doth tremble thrice. Had we
but forecast this great disaster, all the
Democratic household should have been
made to yield up their Java and their Rio
nuuI now Uin November's sere and yellow
leaf o Fate o Fate ! E'NIisery stole
me at my BIRTH
WOrld-'Tis not the fault of Wallace
lis Blair's that renegade Republican,
| His it is; for he let loose his flow of
speech too soon that he might gain our
confidence, but gaining it, he frightened
! all the stable people of the frozen North.
Blair, you did it; and while thou dost
remain as thou vert placed, our second
candidate, we can't succeed. The augu-
ries are 'gainst US. Do a noble action,
Blair, and resign. Our hosts are panic
stricken.
BlaiJ-You lie, you brute Resign I
never did and never will Resignation of
office runs not in Blair blood 1t is dis
ease not known in the family.
Seyn,ou-J said before, 'Your Presi-
dent l cannot be ~
Belmont (sottO voice)-A plaster upon
the WorldS mouth (Aloud) We are
not panic-stricken. All is harmony in
our ranks, and good cheer. The people
mean by these elections that they'll make
Horatio President. (iSotto voce.) Is there
day of judgment ? We hare to lie, or
this rout would be worse than rout, and
prove our own dire aestruction-bo
and all
Wallace (franhcaHy)-Cofee, coffee
pots, and coffee; false seals and signatures.
Seynlour-"You President L cannot
Blair-The World lies. I'll not resign
Washington hteHtgcncer-Let Blair re-
sign. He's ''the dire source of all our
woes" He's worse than the itch, he's
Belmont-Peace, peace let us be har-
monious, dearest brethren. - All is
harmony here. The goose hangs high.
Brick Pomeroy-"Charge, Chester,
charge" ''Once more unto the breach ~ |
Cowards to the rear Give US more
whisky. Stand by your bottles,
Blor-Let's drink. It's long time
between drinks
WaUace-Yes, here's coffee-pot.
Belmont-Most favorable juncture.-
IT'S true, defeat is ours again. But we're
used tot. This quarrel must now cease,
or the stopcock of my Golfers shall be
turned, and my greenbacks cease to come
at your bidding The World has revolved |
too fast, and broken from her moorings. |
She must now return within the realms Of |
party discipline, support the candidates
and do her 'level best" TO change them
is too late. Swapping leaders in presence
of your foe is disastrous ever. Let Hora-
ito speak to the people. He can lie mag
nifcently, and smoothly as the devil
Our noble Blair has thus far borne the |
burden of the fight. Let him rest here
after, while Horatio speaks before the |
people Well all proclaim harmony and
sure victory.
b,tcHigeacer-WeW not. Well not.
Well rant as well as thou.
HorEd-Hard fate thus to succumb
but Belmont holds the purse-strings.
B2aH-Let's drink.
Pomcroy-" Stanley, on !'
HorJd-We'H proclaim Grant an oyster
AMI tortoise Lees gentleman.
Hora,:,-I'll go before the people and
tell them no ham is mine to do if they
but make me Presid5at, for Congress is
sure against me. I'll rant on reconstruc-
ton, too.
Helmbohf-Tm druggist and Dem.
ocrat. If, when the campaigns over,
there's spots before your eyes, or on your
skin or conscience, l have compound made
of Buehu; twill purge you clean and you
shall have it free And twill not gripe