The Portland daily press., 1868-03-24
Miscellany.
MuncIinusenisHns.

Is one OF those exercises oil groteSque fancy
which may serve very well now and then ior
an hours entertainment. The most famous
anil systematic originator OF this sort o. stores
is supposed to be an individual called the
Baron Munchausen, and his name has be-
come a SYNONYM for literary efforts OF this
character The term cGndfd, from the
Frencb.is used to signify an improbable story.
and its origin, which may be new to some OF
our reade S, exceleutlY illustrates the mean
ing OF the word. a Ffenchmau once sent TO
a newspaper a statement OF an experiment
which he had lately made proving the Won
deriul VOiaclty OF ducks. lie hal flock, he
said, Of twenty of these fowls. One Gay he
killed one OF them, and cutting it into very
small pieces, ted 1t, feathers and all to the
oth n nineteen, who ale it all up in a few
minutes. He then cut another, and cutting
it into small pieces, ted it TO the other
eighteen, and it was quickly Sevoured. He
killed another, and ted it to the seventeen re-
naming ducks, and still another which he ted
to the sixteen; and so continued until finally
there was but one duck LEFT, which duck had,
of course, eaten all the other nineteen. Ca
ndrd being the French word for duck, any
exaggerated story was subsequently called a
"canard," OF 'duck story" as in this coun-
try We speak of a "fish story" or a ''snake
story"
1t is sometimes very well to exaggelate
little tor the sake of bringing rilicule upon
those who relate "tous b yarns" and imagine
that the listeners will believe them. Some
one gives the advice:
Wheue'er you hear tale that is ''thumper,"
Show no surprise, but aim at something higher,
And match it with a holder lib and plum or
It's the best method TO contOund a lar.
The people oil Gascony, France, it IS known,
have world wiue reputation for Boosting
from Whence comes the word gasconade. a
Gascon was once Wanting his eyesight to a
citizen OF Paris in the Rue Notre Dame.
sounds" said he, "from this very place see
mouse running at the tep OF the tower"
81 do not see it yet" said the citizen, quietly,
shut hear il troC."
A traveller was relating some improbable
stories of feats performed by Chinese iuggers
and smoke of one who set Il ladder on eud in
an open space and walked the rounds 10 the
top. Il have seen greater feat than that
remarked a oystander; Il have seen iuggler
20 to the top OF ladder in the same way,
and then pull the ladder up after him"
An Engnshman was once making some eX-
traordinary statement as to the speed of a
horse which he owned "My dear SIR, said an
American, that is rather less than the aver
age speed of orr roadsters. l live at nv
country seat near Philadelphia, and when
ride to town in hurry il The morning. nv
shadow doesn't keep up with me, but gener-
ly comes into the store minute or two
after my arrival. One morning my horse was
restless and l rode him as hard as l could
several times around large factory, lust to
take the old Harry out OF him. Wei, sir, he
went SO last that l saw my back before me
The whole time, and was twice in danger oil
riding over myself"
Another Englishman, it is sail, having
heard great deal abou1 the Yankee propen-
sity OF Dragging thought he would maze an
experiment in that art himself. lie walked
up to market woman's stand, and pointing
to some large watermelons, said: .'What!
don't you raise any bigger apples than those
in America? ?" "Apples!' said the woman, dis
daniully, ANY BODY might know on " as an
Englishman. Them's huckleberI les"
The above will be sufficient to illustrate the
uce OF Munchausensisms as method OF repar
tee. But another purpose to which some glib
talker has professed to put such stories is OF
quite different character. He says he finds
them very effective IN opening oysters, He
places the oysters in circle, and, seating
himselfin the centre, commences some very
surprising narrative. One by one thcy begin
t. cape with astonishment, and as they open
their mouths, he has his knife ready, whips
them out, salts, peppers and swallows theyn.
We call TO mind Several stories which we
imagine would be OF great service to the gen
tleman above mentioned, and perhaps a brief
statement OF some Of them might not be inap-
propriate here. The first will refer 10 a very
heavy fog which once visited the State OF
Massachusetts,, which probably somewhat sur
passed the logs OF the city Of London.
young man was sent out to the meadow to
nail on few courses OF shingles on a barn.
the root of which was nearly finished. .sAt
dinner tlme," continues the farmer who is re.
sponsible for the story, '.the fellow came up
and seq he: That's an almighty long barn OF
M + Ot
he, I've been to work ali this forenoon and
hayn't bad one course LAID yet! We'll. sell
you're lazy fellow, that's all I've got to say
80 after dinner went down to see what he'd
been about, and ri be thundered if he ha.,n't
Fhingled more than 4 hundred feet right out
ito the fogp
The second Will be very rich farm, con-
corning which the narrator says: L went
over last summer with two friends. and ,Jone,
ok US on four acre lot he had Just prepar-
ed for planting. We all went to the center of
the lot, and he there made single hill, and
showed US cucumber SEED. Now. bows, said
be, when put This seed INTO the ground you
must run Tor the fence and get out as quick
as you can No sooner had he dropped the
seed than he and the others started off as il a
bull dog had been after then. / was SO sur.
prlsed that forgot the warning until l s,,w
vine pushing up from the ground and max
Tut before l got to the fence the vip Q caugbf
me and began to wind around me like a
snake. was very much alarD.ed: and nut
my hand to my pocket tor my lack knife. with
which TO cut myself loose; but to NV hor-
ror could not get 1t ON account of a cucnm-
Der which hung there AMI which was g1ow-
ing like blazes,"
Inc next story shall be of very large tree
IN the otate OF California. A man went to
inc WOODS 10 cut 1t down. He had chopped
about ten days when he thought he won. d
take walk about the tree, Just to see how
much he had to cut; what was his SUNRISE
when he got to the other side, to find another
man cutting On The anne tree. Il sly.D SAID
the Californian, chow long have ,on been
cutting" just three weeks" said the
stranger. The tree was so big around that
they had not heard the sound oil each otbeI;S
. ies!
There is something very comical about
so ne OF these lancies. The KilkepDv cats
have passed into proverb. Even that tale
IS almost matched 10y one more recent OF a
zen which went to lay in a new patent hens
nest, 10 which the eggs drop through a trap
door, and so deceive biddy that she keeps on
laying. This particular hen went on the per-
tuader, as the invention s called, anil meyer
came oil again. The owner Visited the ner-
suader at night. In the upper compartments |
~ ,o"hu I" ndnuIui OF feathers, few toe
.iI anu piil' In the lo'er compartment |
were three dozen and eleven ergs. The GaI
lcate constitution OF the hen had been mn
equal to the effort; and, fired by younr am
bitlon, she had laid herself all aWav.
lne man with the wonderful mechanical
leg, winch would never stop walking, was a |
very queer invention; but was hardly eouaI
TO the person OF whom there is a German Ia |
gend. who, having lost his LEGS in the war
was furnished with two India rubtet chs
On putting them on be felt so happy that he |
80. un5 INTO the arr but when hs came down |
he bounded back higher than before; and so
every time he came down he rebOunded into
tne air with greater velocity, until, as days
ana weeks ard months passed on. and |
ne returned from his AERIAL trips at Ion
sst a intervals, be bounded above the clouds |
I, Il anne down upon all parts Ui the earth |
reho opposed that he is still bounding and |
ca' $50 lung among the orbs of The univ erse,
carried now to one and nov, IN o,o.f'11. 49,
A. uin rent currents of grayitation and |
.t NC WIN continue thus in lnceasing mo
t .Ion Inloo5n al eternity. His tate VS. os
lelTip as mat OF man who h,ooroo 81;
tim OF an incurable a2ue. "'o'''iie Tue VIC
And it shook him, shook hi,
Shook his boots of and his Ioe oorGiy,
SnOok his teeth out and his hair na9'
Shook his coat all into tatters Oh
Shook his shirt all into ribbons
ShirtleSs, coatless, hairless tooiblo..
Minus boots and minus TOE nails.
S i'll it shook him, shook him, till il
Made him yellow, gaunt and bony;
Shook him till he reached his death bed
Shook him till it shuffled for him
on his mortal coil, and then, it
SSavIns laid him cold and quiet,
SuooH the earth all down uDon him;
hrN, -. l..