davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
Accented Masons,

AT an inn in the west of England sew
eral people were sitting around the fire
in large kitchen. Among them were
a travelling woman and tailor. In
this inn, a Masonic lodge was held, and
it heing the evening for their meeting,
several members passed through the
room on their way to the lodge room.
This introduced observations on the
principles of Masonry and the signs
by which Masons could be known to
each other.
The woman said there was not so
much mystery as people imagined, for
she could show anybody the -Masons'
sign.
What" said the tailor, "that of a
Free and Accepted Mason p
'Yes said she 'and l will wager you
large bowl of punch, and any MEM
ber you choose shall confirm it, why
said he, "a woman never was admitted,
and is it possible you can know any of
their signs?'
NO matter for that, will readily for
felt the wager if do not establish the
fact
The tailor finally agreed to accept the
bet and the price of the punch was de-
posted.
The woman got up and took hold of
the tailor by the collar, saying-'Comc
follow me- This he did trembling, fear
ing he was to undergo some part of
the discipline in the making of Mason
ofwhich he had heard dreadful report.
She led him into the street and point
ing to the sign of the Lion and the
Lamb, asked him whose sign it was.
He answered, 'it was Mr.. LOrdcrS'
(the name of the innkcepcr.)
! 'Is he u Froornn7on p
YES
Then, saidthe woman Il have shown
you the sign of Free and Accepted
| Mason
The laugh was so much against poor
snip for being taken in, that it was
with some difficulty he could be pre-,
vailed on to partake of the punch.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

LAVE FOR GoOD.--ThOusands of men
breathe, move, and liVe-pass OIL the
stage of liie--and are heard of no more.
Why? They did not particle of good
in the world and none We're blessed by
them, none could point TO them as the
instrument of their redemption; not a
word they spoke could be recalled, and
so they persisted! their light went
out in darkness, and they were not re-
mnmbered more than the insects of yes
turday. Will you thus live and die, o
man immortal? Live for something.
DO good, and leave behind you a monu-
ment of virtue that the storm of time
can never destroy. Write your name
in kindness, love, and mercy, on the
hearts of thousands you come in con-
tact with year by year, and you will
never be forgotten. MOI your name,
your deeds, will be as legible on the
hearts you leave behind, as the stars on
the brow of evening, Good deeds will
shine& brightly on the earth as the
stars of heaven.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

WHERE Is YOUR Boy AT NIGHT
The practice of allowing boys to spend
their evenings in the streets is one of
the most ruinous, dangerous and mis-
chiovous things possible. Nothing so
speedily apd surely marks their course
downward
They acquire, under the cover of
night, an unhealthy state of mind, vul-
gar and profane language, obscene prac-
tices, criminal sentiments, and a law
less, riotous bearing, Indeed, il is in
the streets, after nightfall, that boys
generally acquire the education and the
capacity for becoming rowdy, dissolute
men. Parents, do you believe IL? VIII
you keep your children home of nights.
and see that their home Is made pleas.
ant and profitable?
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
PRICE FIVE CENTS.
How The Devil Lost.

The following is too good to be lost.
We clip il from an exchange paper, and
respectfully call the attention to ii of
certain persons who feel disposed to
spread in the newspaper line.
a young man who ardently desired
wealth, was visited by his Satanic my
esty, who tempted him to promise III.
soul for eternity, if he could be ii.is Is
piled on this earth with all the IN zee zee
he could use. The bargain was coz 4
ded-the devil was to supply the
ey, and was at last to have the sou
less the young man could spend Ia
moEey than the devil could furnisL
Years passed away-the man married,
was extravagant in his living, built
palaces, speculatcd widely-lost and
gave away fortunes, and yet his Golfers
were always full. He turned politician
and bribed his way into power and
fame, without reducing his "pile" of
gold. He became a "hllibuster," and
fitted out ships and armies, but his
banker honored all his drafts. He went
to st. Paul to live and paid the usual
rates of interest for all the money he
could borrow, but though the devil
made wry faces when he came to buy
the bills, yet they were all paid. One
experiment after another failed; the
devil counted the time, only two years,
that he must wait for the soul, and
Knocked the efforts ofthe despairing man.
One more trial was resolved upon-the
man started newspaper! The devil
growled at the bill at the end of the
first quarter, was savage at the end of
six months, melancholy in nine, and
broke, "dead broke" at the end of the
year. SO the newspaper went down,
but The soul was saved.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

TIE TWO SERVICES know, with
Newton, what the world can do, and
what it cannot do," said llcdley Vi
cars, a pious English officer, who per-
ished in the war Of the Crimea. "lt
cannot give or take away the peace of
God in the soul. 1t cannot soOthe the
wounded conscience, or enable us to
meet death With comfort, have tried
both services. For twenty-four years |
lived under the yoke ofsin. The retro
spect of my past life is now miserable
to me yet, before | was taught by the
Spirit of God, thought and called 1t Il
life of pleasure. The very name when
applied to sin, now makes my heart
sicken. Even then | could never enjoy
reviewing the occupations of Il single
day; and think you my conscience Wa'
quiet ?? No, no. Bitter experience ha,
taught me that there is no peace for tho
wicked. Blessed be God, now ! an
pardoned and reconciled through the
death of his Son. How happy Is the
Christians lire when he has this assur
ance."
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

\ CAUTIOUS JUDGE.-An Irish judge
tried two notorious fellows for high
way robbery, To the astonishment of
the court, they We're found not guilty.
As they were being removed from the
r,thc Judge addressing the jailor, said,
"Nlr Murphy, you would greatly case
my mind it, you would keep those two
respectable gentlemen until seven on
half past seven O'clock, for | mean tc
set out for Dublin at five, and should
like to have at least two hours start oi
| thcm.n
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
How Good Tomplars Initiate Can.
didates.

The following must have been writ
ten by chap who got tight on lager
without knowing it would intoxicate.
1t refers to lodge of Good Templars.
1t is a graphic description of an 'init
tlon ceremony" rs the writer under
stands it b:
In the first place, the victim for ini-
tiation Is blindfolded, bound hands and
feet, and thrown into a caldrOn Of boil
ing hot rain water, aud boiled for five
minutes.
This is done for the purpose Of clear
ing his system of cold drunk" lie is
then taken out of the caldron, and by
means of Il force-pump gorged with
cistern water, after which Il scaling plas-
ter is put over his mouth, and he is
rolled ina barrel four or.fve times across
the room.
The choir ut the same time singing
the cold water song.
He is now taken out of the barrel,
and hung up by the heels till the water
runs out through his ears.
He is then cut down, and a beautiful
young lady hands him glass of cistern
water.
A cold-water bath is then furnishe ed
him, after which he is showered with
cistern water.
He is then made to read the water
works act ten times, drinking glass of
cistern water between each reading.
After which the "old oaken bucket"
is hung around his neck, and fifteen
sisters with squirt-gu deluge him
with cistern water.
lie is then forced to eat peck of
snow while the brothers stick his ears
full of icicles.
Heis then run through clothes-wring-
er, after which he is handed Il glass of
cistern water by beautiful young lady.
He is then gorged again with cistern
water, his boots filled with the same,
and he is laid away in refrigerator.
The initiation is now almost conclu-
ded.
After remaining in the refrigerator
for the space Of half an hour, he is
taken out and given glass of cstern
water, run through the clothes-w wiring
er again, and becomes Good Templar.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

TIE WICKEDEsT MAN.-ACcOrding
to the following paragraph from this
weeks Mdepcndea, the" Wickedest Man
in New York" has seen the error Of his
ways:
"John Allen, the Wickedest Man in
New York" has recently pledged his
word indeed he has signed bond that he
will forthwith abandon his dance house
business. lie has been led to take this
course because his little son, Chester,
came home from school crying as though
his heart would break, because his
schoolmutes said his father was the
wickcdest man in New York. After
seeing himself photographed in 'Pach-
ards Monthly, he called upon Mr.. r..
| C.. Acton for advice, and our police
| president advised him in the most en-.
| phatic manner, to get out of the Water
street den. We are happy to learn that
Allen has proved, by his apparent peni-
tcncc, that he is not the wickedest man
in New York, and we hope that he ha,
already fulfilled his promise"
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

a PRIMER, meddling with the YER
diet ofa coroner's jury, struck out Il
comma after the word "apopleXy,"
making il read as follows:
deceased came to his death by eX'
cesslve drinking, producing apopleXS
in the minds of the jury"
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

HOLD ON BOYs.-Hold on to your
tongue when you are just ready to
swear, lie or speak harshly, or use any
improper word.
Hold on to your hand when you are
about to strike, steal or do any improp-
er act.
Hold on to your feet when you are
on the point of kicking running away
from stud or pursuing the path Of error,
snamc orcrimc.
Held your temper when you are an
cry, excited or imposed upon, or other
are angry about you.
Hold on to your heart when evil per.
sons seek your company, and invite
you to join in their games, mirth and
revelry.
Hold on to your good name at all
times, for it is much more valuable tc
you than gold, high places or fashion,
able attire.
Hold on to the truth, for it will serve
well and do you good throughout cter'
nifty.
| Hold on to your virtue, ii is above all
price to you in all times and places.
Hold on to your character, for ii i,
and ever will be your best wealth.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

AN old picture represents a king sit
ting in state, with label, 81 govern
all'-a bishop with legend. 81 pray
for all"--a soldier with motto,"l fight
for all"-and a farmer drawi ng rcluct-
antly purse, with the inscription, 81
pay for ALL" There is more truth than
poetry in the idea.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
HOTELS AND SALOONS.
ENCHANGE HOTEL,
RIOONISBIrRG. OLIrMBIA CO., PA.

The undcrs igned having purchased this we'll
known and centrally located house, the Exchange
Hotel, situate on MAIN STREET, in Bloomsbury
Immediately opposi G the Columbia county Court
House, respectfully inform their friends ana the
public in general that their house Is now IN ORDER
who may be disposed TO favor IL with their Gus
tom. They have spared no expense in preparing
the Exchange for the entertainment oftheir ts
neither shall there be anything wanting ON heir
part to minister to their personal comfort. lhey
house is spuciuuS and enjoys an excellent husl-
ness location,
Omnibuses run all times between the EN-
change Hotel and the various railroad depots, by
which travellers will he pleasantly conveyed TO
and from the respective stations in due tlne 10
meet the ears. KOONS a CLARK,
bloomsbury, April 3, 1865.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

lT is related of the Miss Foot9>who
has just married Senator Glenderson,
that once, when she and her sister went
to party with their uncle, senator
Foote, now deceased, n grammatical
servant Of the IIibernian persuasion an
nounced: "Sinatur Foot and the two
! Misses Feet
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

adv EkIlSlNG FOX SEALED INOIDS-
ASA chap issued leap year invita-.
tion, and sent the following "notice to
contractors" for publication
TO CONTRACTORS.
The undersigned, feeling the want OF
some one to find fault with, and grum-
bic at when business matters go wrong,
and being lonely with no one to hate
him and whereas, having arrived at
the proper age he is determined to
"comc out;n
Sealed proposals will be received un-
til O'Clock p. NJ. on the 3lst of Decem.
Der, 1865.
Applicants must POSSESS beauty or its
equivalent in currency.
She must possess sweet and lorgiv-
ing disposition, and when one cheek is
kissed turn the other-that is if the
right man is kissing.
She may not chew gum.
Nor wear long dresses in the street.
Nor frequent sewing circles.
Nor so around begging for charitable
purposes.
Nor read the paper first in the morn
ing.
Nor talk when am sleeping.
Nor sleep when | am talking.
Nor trade off clothes to wandering
Italians for flower vases.
Nor borrow money from my vest
pockets when | sleep.
Nor hold a looking glass over my face
at such times, to make me tell all |
know. ..----'.'
She must believe'fn sudden attacks of
chills, and allowance for their effect on
the nervous system.
When her cold bear" comes home
from "few friends" rather affection
ate, she must not Ia le advantage of his
state and wheedle him into trips to wa
tering places.
And above all sh must not on such
occasions put epecac into the coffee she
prepares for his "poor head"
She must sit up for him when he hap
pens to be detained ut a late hour on
his committee.
But when he does return, tired and
chilly, she will be expected to roll over
to the other side, and give him her
warm place.
y lady possessing the forgiving quail
itications, positive, and negative, can
hear of something to her advantage by
addressing the undersigned, inciosing
red stamp.
All proposals must he accompanied
with satisfactory evidence of the ability
of the applicant to support IL husband
in the style to which he has been ac.
customod.
\ MARRIED MAN COMES OUT EVEN
Two friends, one an Englishman anC
the othcra Frenchman, ,chanced to NEE
at the Paris exposition.
"What! you in France, my deal
William ," said the latter. 81 am de
lighted to see you. How do you dc"
"Not very well. l have been mar
ried since | saw you last.
"That's good"
"No, it isn't; for my wife was {
shrew."
II am sorry; that's bad"
"Not altogether; for she brought m,
a dowry Of ten thousand pounds ster
ling"
"Ten thousand pounds! ,'rhat's good
il consoles yOu-f
'9No it doesn't, for | invested the
money in herds of cattle, and they al
died of the disease that has just beel
raging in England"
"Thats bad
"Not at all; for the skins brough
me more than paid for the cattle"
"Thcn you are indemniticd.
"No, not altogether; for bought ,
fine house with the money, and it ha
just been burned"
"Oh, what misfortune"
"Not so great one, either, for IN.
wife was in it, and She was burned witt
the house."
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

Executors and Administrators Notice $500; Au-
ditor's Notice $3.50. Other advertisements lnser-
ted according to special contract.
Business notices. without advertisement, twenty
cents per line.
Transient advertisements payable in advance
all others due after the first insertion.
go 1t is in all cases, more likely to be satlsfac-
tory, both to subscribers and to The Publishers,
that remittances and all communications respect
ing the business of the paper, be sent direct to the
Office of publication. All letters, whether relating
to the editorial or business concerns of the paper
and all payments for subscrii lions, advertising,
or jobbing, are to be made to and addressed
BROUKWAY & FREEZE,
"CbiDnbidn O0ice,"
BLooMSBURG. PA.
Printed at Robisons Buildings, near the Conrt
House, by
G. NJ. VANDERSLICE.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
CATAWISSA DIRECTORY.

CtUSQUEHANNA or Brick Hotel, s. Kostehauder
> proprietor, south corner Main and second
Street v2-nl2
7 II. GREASY, dry goods, groceries, and gem
j cral Merchandise, Main Street. v2-nl2
G ID. RINARD, dealer in stoves and tin-ware,
D Main street. v2-nl2
w v2-nl2
GILBERT & KLINE, dry goods, groceries, and
" general merchandise, Main Street. V2-nl2
KELLER, billiard saloon, oysters, and Ice
IL. cream in season Main street. VINE
ID +. DALLMAN, Merchant Tailor, Second St.
Ii Robbins Buildipg v2-nlS
nR. ]. X. ROBBINS, Surgeon and Physician,
| J Sero nd ST below Main. v2-nlS
r b. KISTLER, "Cattawisa House" North West
v Corner Main and Second Streets. WINS.
NJ NJ. BROBST, dealer in General Merchandise,
nj. Dry Goods Groceries &c. V2-nlS.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
JERSEYTOWN DIRECTORY.
BUCKHORN DIRECTORY.

NJ G. &W. H. SHOEMAKER, dealers in dry
Nj goods, groceries and general merchandise.
HRS store i'm south end oftOWn, N2-nlS.
TACOB 4 WM. HARRIS dealers in dry goods,
,-t,1s
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
Wit and Humor,

ADVERTISING FOR SEALED PRoPos-
ALs.-A chap issued leap year invita-
tion, and sent the following "notice to
contractors" for publication
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14

\ WITNESS in court who had been
cautioned to give precise answer to
every question, and not to talk about
what he might think the question
meant, was intcrrogatcd as follows:
oIo'.ir ! ,ln mof~
.N,,h, ,,a, lil ,au a. .,u n,,.
,,,,,,at r.,a,,,I - A., ti,i ,,,e,,,',,,o,,
',T, In. li1 ,,nt "
..>-o'. -, T T,nt ' - ,.o, -, ,.,nr
o,u, Ia ,,a, 80 I,;,,..,, ,',,,ar ~,
'"'',, Nv Wv y" =, "'' "'''' 81 ""'7'''
,,,What NJ a,t',,''.......,,.,au 49, uo,o,
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1868-08-14
LIGHT STREET DIRECTORY.

DETER ENT, dealer in dry goods, groceries,
L -four, feed, salt, fish, iron, nails, etc., Light
Street. vl-ni5
I JTERWILLIGER, Cabinetmaker, Undertaken
u and Chuirmaker vl-ni6
rOSEPH WALTER Blacksmith, opposite post
" Office. >i-h"
LIE. OMAN X Co., Wheelwrghts, first door
Ill above school house. Nl-hio
Nj S " vl-ni6
Tw SANKEY dealer in Leather, Hides, Bark,
u etc. Cash paid for Hides. Nl-hfo
WIN. NJ. ENT, dealer in stoves and tin ware In
w all its branches. Nl-hio
boots and shoes, vl-n6I
j. Lesser, NJ. ID. Surgeon and Physician.
j, oflire nj KeIler's Hotel v2-n27
ESPY DIRECTORY.
II, pronrietor vl2nll
II +. REIGHARD, a BRO, dealers in dry goods,
d. groceries, and general merchandise. Nl2nll
| I u. CALDWELL, dealer in dry goods, grocer
81. les, qucenswarc, hardware, hSi, SAT- III, h9liSi
| etc., etc., >'-hii
~ W. EDGAR, Susquehannu Planning Mill and
]. Box Mandatory. Nl-hii
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1868-05-27
SCHUYLER C0LFAX.
OF INDIANA.
OUR FLAG IS THERE.

The Republican banner is once more
on the outer wall. It never had nobler
standard bearers, GRANT and CoLFAH.
First in war, first in peace and first III the
hearts Of their countrymen. The tide
has been setting long toward General
Grant for the Presidency No human
power could withstand it. In this time
of sore trial we cannot believe that God
has forsaken the nation, and we are fam
to believe that the instinct Ct the people
so strongly set on GRANT is the voice of
God. We confess that we have wanted
to hear more from GRANT Of his views
on many of our political questions. But
when we hove heard, his voice has been
satisfactory. We reflect that William
the Silent, and George Washington we're
no babblers, Yet liberty prospered under
their guidance as never under the most
golublc of her true supporters. We
know we shall have a President in
GRANT whom we shall all respect. No
more swinging round the circle. No
more drunken harangues TO drunken
mobs. No moro triumphant whiskey
rings under whose corruption the liberty
and honor Of the nation sits humbled
Gen. Grant will give US firm strong
hand at the helm, and redeem the Presi-
dency once more from disgrace. Than
Mr. Colfax no man since Henry Clay has
been more popular,
He is one of God s noblest works-dn
honest man. He is statesman, man
Of ability. Whatever that is virtuous Oh
praiswortby that finds its abode in man, Is
in Mr.. CoLFAx. IF the Nation cannot
elect such man as Mr.. CoLFAx to the
Vice Presidency it deserves to die
Fall in, men--GRANT and CoLFAx. Ir
this sign the nation shall be redeemed
and generations shall call us blessed.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1868-05-27
THE POLITICAL EFFECT OF I'M.
PARCHMENT.

Since the beginning Of the impeach-
ment trial, it has often been said by
friends as we'll as enemies, that the fate
of the Republican party depended upon
the success of the measure. The trial
is now virtually ended, and the pTobabil-
ity is that President johnson will escape
the just penalty of his crimes. Yet there
seems to be no reason to fear that the
great Radical party Of the country has
received its death blow. 1t is probable
that many earnest Republicans, in the
first keen modification Of the failure, may
consider that all has been staked and lost,
and that the party can never rally again
with that power which has repeatedly
heretofore carried all before it. But we
cannot Believe that this view Of the case
will influence any person long. The rea-
sons for which we have always urged our
cla'",s upon the suffrage of the people,
remaln Tie same now as heretofore. IF
there was ever anything of worth in The
principles and policy advocated by the
Republican party, they are just as val
liable now. Disasters do not change
principles Bull Run and Chicamauga
did not prove our cause to be wrong.
Unvarying success never yet marked the
progress of the Right. The soldiers Of
Reform wear a SCARED armor, but their
banner leads to certain victory. So long
as our watchword is, "the equal rights Of
man." we shall rise again from every
overthrow.
The manner in which the failure Of the
impeachment was accomplished adds pc
culiar bitterness to it. Treacherous
friends are the worst foes, and the Re
publican party has always had moro of
them to contend with than any Of It's
predecessors. If it had not ever been the
advocste of great and noble principles,
they would have accomplished its destruc'
ton ere this But now, with It's camp
purgod of traitors and its councils puri-
fed, who can doubt that it is destined to
Ala Bright pages to its already glorious