North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1868-02-12

nervous man. lie came honestly by it, for
his mother was nervous before him. Mr..
Corban was bachelor of forty-fve, re-
markably well preserved, and rather fine
looking. lie had portly figure, Horid
complexion, and head Of dark brown
hair, which any man might have been
excused for feeling proud of. MIR. Corban
was very well Of. He had never kept
house, perhaps because Ae knew that such
! elderly bachelors and widowers were gen.
orally fated to marry their housekecpers /;
and MIR. Corban regarded marriage and the
gallows as about on a par. Women and
babies he considered a very unnecessary
part of creation. The mystery Of their
having been allowed an existence he could
never solve. lie could not help regarding
their creation as grave mistake some
where. He boarded at Mrs. Gregg's, and
had made his home there for fifteen years.
could be, and still be woman.
One day last summer it became evident
to MIR. Corban that he must take a journey
west. The interest of his business de-
manded it SO he put few things into his
valise, said good morning to Mrs. Gregg,
and set out for the depot. lie was five
minutes too late, for his necktie had given
him great deal of trouble, and he had
been unable to find pair of stockings that
were not destitute of the toes. But he had
comforted himself with the reflection that
as he had boots on, nobody would be wiser
in regard to the unclad condition of his
toes, and at last he got Off He heard the
whistle and started on the run. If there
is anything especially calculated to put
one out Of temper, it is having to run to
catch the cars; and our hero may be ex-
cuscd if, when dripping with perspiration
and completely out of breath, he rushed
into the first car which offered, he was ir-
ritated with the world, himself included.
The carwas well filed. In fact there
was only one vacant seat, and that was be-
side woman. Corban turned to seek the
next car, but was met by the conductor at
the door, ''No room in there sir All
full. Anniversary meeting at Parkers-
burg. There's a seat, sir u indicating the
one beside the woman. Corban was trot-
| bled with touch of the rheumatism in
his left knee, and could not stand comfor-
| tably--nothing else could have forced him
TO get so near one Of the sex. He stepped
up to her and politely made the stereotyp-
cd inquiry:
This seat engaged ?''
! "No, SIR" replied very sweet voice
and Corban saw that the speaker had blue
eyes and golden hair.
| He took a seat and the lady drew the
bundle she had been resting on the cush-
ion into her lap.
Better let me put your bundle upon
the rack p suggested Mr.. Corban.
l lad in ind, =
amazement, whipped of layer Of flannel
from the package, and displayed to the
horriied gaze of our bachelor friend the
red, puffy face Of moon-eyed baby.
"Muzzer's little 'tweety shugar dar-
ling y she exclaimed, in that dialect
which is perfectly ineligible to all daby,
dom.
"Muzzer won't let the naughty man put
the little lammic, lumpy baby up on the
rack"
The baby struck out menacingiy with
its Cat fists in the direction Of Mr.. Corban,
and gave utterance to yell of triumph
Mr.. Corban broke into a cold perspiration.
lie had never been so near a baby before
in his life. 1t was almost too much for
him. He had a strong mind to stand the
remainder of the way, or until somebody
vacated seat but his knee gave an extra
twinge, and decided him to try and endure
the terrible state of things. He took u
paper from his pocket and essayed to
read but the baby had launched out in
o. of those baby refrains, which is like
music in the ears of all mothers, and the
cooling so confused our bachelor hero that
he could take no sense of his paper, so he
pockcted it with the savage determination
to petition the next Congress for women
with babies to be kept in car by them
selves.
At the first stopping place he was on the
lookout for seat, and to his joy discov-
erred the gentleman in the next seat max
ing preparations to leave but before he
was fairly out of his seat, an old lady in a
green shawl and poke bonnet had edged
into it, and cut off Mr.. Corban's hopes
Of course, she turned around and began at
once to talk to the baby.
''Dear little chicken How old is it,
marin p
"Almost eight months" said the proud
mother.
"Well, declare what large child OF
his age Why, there was my Enoch, when
he was year he warn't mite nor grain
bigger than that child But then Enoch,
he had the whooping- cough, and the mea-
sles, and the nettle-rash, and the collarctta
infantcde afore he was eleven months !
And l expect the diseases had some effect
upon his constitution II
| =" should think so" replied the baby's
mother.
g You look tired, DEAR" went on the old
lady 1.-THE baby must be dreadful heavy.
| Why don't you let his pa take him p with
Il reproachful glance at the savage counte-
nance Of Mr.. Corban.
"Im not his pa,' grumbled Mr.. Cor
! ban. pulling his hat a little farther down
over his eyes.
"Oh You amt. Wall, now, that's
curis y said the old lady. II should have
thought you war for sartin. The baby is
the image OF you-jcst the same kind of
nose and it's eyes has got the same ex-
preston.
Expression, indeed Mr.. Carbon wa.
boiling over He always peculiarly prid-
ed himself on his expression and here
was this ugly old ogre comparing him to
that dumpling-faced, huckleberry- eyed
baby!
"Wall," said the old lady, slowly, as
though she had reached the conclusion af-
ter some thought, II 'spose as it's likely
this is postmortem child, which means
one as is born after the death of its father,
and you married it's mother rather soon
after her husband departed this vale of
tears. Wall, that's got to be dreadful
common. But my Elijah has been dead
nigh on to nineteen months, and hahn t
begun to think of second partner tho
Squire Hudson, he has been left SO help
less and unfortunit with them six children
of his, that don't know. hope the Lord
will show me my duty, and give me good
strength to take the Squire for better or
for worse now, if it's right and best,
| Joost uovo~ ~rox& - ch ,.rl, IN l,,k,, ,oor,~,