davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

LABELS FOR FRUIT TREES.-We
have found the following receipt, taken
from an English work, to make an in
delible Ink, for writing on zinc, and
one not affected by the weather. Cut
up the common sheet zinc into strips
about half an inch wide by 2 or 3 inch
es long, and write with quill pen.
The zine should previously be made
bright. Through hole at one end in
troduce thin copper wire, long g
nough to encircle branch or limb,
and it will remain for years, giving Ia
the owner of a newly planted orchard
the satisfaction of knowing, at ALI
times, his varieties. Care in respect to
labels would obviate much of the con-
fusion in all parts of the country, as to
correct ture. -"Takea drachm
of Verdegris, drachm Sal-ammonia
powder and half a drachm Of Lamp
black, and mixed with 10 drachms OF
water" Shake before using.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

WHAT PLEASURE IS 1T TO PAY
ONES DEBTS. 1t seems to flow from
combination of circumstances. 1t re-
moves that uneasiness which a true
spirit feels from dependence and obli-
CATION. 1t affords pleasure to the cred
itor, and therefore gratifies our social
affection. 1t promotes the future con-
fidence which is so very interesting to
the honest mind; it opens prospect
of being really supplied with what we
want on future occasions; it leaves a
consciousness of our own virtue; and
it is a measure we know to be right,
both in point ofjustice and sound econ
omy. Finally, it is the main support
of q business reputation.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
WADE AND TEEE. PRESIDENCY.


The Constitution of the Union, says
the Cincinnati Enquirer, excludes the
Vice Presi ent from presiding in the
Senate when it is organized as q Court
of impeachment for the trial Of the
President of the United States. In
all other impeachments he presides,
but in this case the Chief-Justice takes
his place at the head of the Senate
The Reason Of it is that, being Vice
President, he would succeed the Presi-
dent If he was successfully impeached,
and therefore has great interest in Sc
curing his conviction. BENJIAEAN +.
WADE, of Ohio, now stands in the pO-
sitiOn of Vice President. He IS the
President of the Senate. There being
no Vice-P President, he draws the salary
of that Office and in Gaze Of the death
or removal of the Chief Magistrate, he
becomes the President. he has the
same interest, therefore, in hls reno
mOval as the Vice-President. Inc
same constitutional reasons that W,"Ilid
prevent regularly-chOsen Vice Pre-. VI
dent from acting in a Presidents trial
applies to Mr.. WADE. But the latter
cares nothing for the Constitution. He
cares nothing for Individual decency or
self-respect. He insists upon being one
of the Presidents judges, with the
temptation before him of the Presidents
Office, in case he is convicted. He is
admitted to be deeply interested jur-
or. If his vote secures the impeach-
ment of the President, his salary is in
creased from $4,000 to SO, 200 a year,
together with all the immense patron
age and power of the Office. Under
these circumstances, what must be
the shameful effrontery of that
man who would insist upon being
sworn in as party to decide upon
what was really his own case? Itcan-
not be estimated. He must have a
cheek of iron and a forehead of brass.
But BENJIMAN +. WADE is that man.
With an indecency that would almost
Shame Satan himself, he approaches the
bar of the Senate to take an oath only to
b. given to fair and disinterested
judge.
But, execrable as is his conduct, how
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

IF YOU would have loving wife be
as gentle in your words after as be-
fore marriage; treat her quite as ten
derby when a matron as when a miss !;
don't make her the maid of all work
and ask her why she looks less tidy
and neat than when "you first knew
her;" don't buy cheap, tough beef, and
scOld because it does not come on the
table "porter house," don't grumble
about squalling babies if you cannot
keep up a nursery" and remember
that "baby may take after its papa in
disposition; don't smoke and chew to-
bacco, and thus shatter your nerves,
and spoil your temper, and make your
breath nuisance, and then complain
that your wife declines to kiss you go
home joyous and cheerful to your wife
and tell her the good news you have
heard, and not silently put on your hat
and go to the "club" or 'lodge," and
let her afterwards learn that you have
spent the evening at the opera or at a
fancy ball with Mrs. Dash. Love your
wife be patient; remember you are
not perfect, but try to be; let whisky,
tobacco, and vulgar company alone ;
spend your evenings with your wife,
and live decent, christian life, and
your wife will be loving and true-if
you did not marry heartless beauty
without sense or worth; if you did,
who is to blame if you suffer the conse-
quences?
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

much more infamous is that OF the
Senate itself, which permits such an
outrage upon every priciple of justice
such scandal upon common and Or
dinary decency-to be consummated =?
But it does so even without murmur.
A majority of its members are little if
any better than WADE. They have
preiudged and decided the case in ad-
vance against the President. With
out hearing a word from theparty accus-
ed-With no trial whatever-before any
impeachment-th Senate decided, by
resolution, that the President had vio-
lated the Constitution by the removal
of STANTON, and the appointment of
General THOMAS, as Secretary OF War.
Thus the President appears, for what
is called trial, before body of judges
who are either interested against him,
or who, in advance Of any trial, have
made up their minds in the case 1t
is such body-such an organization
that the Radical press calls a High
Court of impeachment.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
Jhe 8eaford GazettR,
A TAX RIDDEN PEOPLE.

The st. Louis Democrat, Radical pa
per, declares that ''industry languishes,
and the whole country suffer9 because
of the burdens of taxation"
.They al taxed on their clothing their iueat and
their bread,
On their pets their dishes, their tables and bed,
On their tea and their coffee their fuel and lights
They are ia xed so severely they can't sleep O.
nights
They are taxed on their offices, stores and their
shops
On their stoves, their wash tubs their brOoms and
their mops,
On their sE1rouds and their tOmhstones, and after
they die
They are taxed on the coffns in which they must
lie.
They are on their mortgages notes, checks
and bills,
On their deeds on their contracts, and their
last wills;
And the Star Spa 7gled Banner in mourning doth
wave,
Der the wealth of the nation stamped into the
grave.
They are taxed on all goods by kind Providence
given,
They are taxed on the Bible that points them to
Heaven;
And when they ascend to their heavenly goal,
They would, if they could, stick stlsmps on their
souZ .,
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
MEET GERTRUDE"

The Selma Messenger tells the follow
ing capital story as genuine and au-
thentic:
Among the most enterprising and
industrious merchants of Selma is One
whom we will call Smith, principally
because it isn't his name, who is bless
ed with a most exemplary wife in all
respects save one-she is of rather a
jealous disposition. Mr.. Smith has
been Of late very much engrOSSed in
his business, and has often consumed
his evenings over his ledger instead Of
in the bosom of his family, as has
been his custom for years. In reply
to the queries Of Mrs. Smith on the
subject, he would always say that he
was employed in his business. She did
not understand how business could
take up so much of his time, and her
suspicious were aroused that all was
not right. Visions of hours spent by
her husband in other female society
than her own haunted her mind, and
she made an inward VOW to watch him
and see for herself.
Soon after arriving at this reSOlu-
ton a telegram arrived for her hus-
band and was sent to his office, which
was closed, as he had gone to his sup
per. The carrier went to his house
and delivered it to the servant at the
door. The gentleman not having ar
rived, it was handed to his wife, who
with true feminine curiosity, read it.
1t was plain and short:
MONTGOMERY, Dec, 1867.
Mr.. SMITH Meet Gertrude to-
night.
Here was a horrible confirmation of
her worst fears. Controlling herself
as best she could, she laid the dispatch
by his plate. He came in, read it, and
said she would have to go down after
supper, and might not be back till
late" He hurried through his meal,
took his hat, and walked hurriedly
down the street. Before he had turn
ed the corner his wife was following
him, swiftly and nOiselessly. He went
straight on. she close behind, until he
reached the wharf
After an apparent inspection of the
surroundings, he stepped down the hill
and took a seat in the Office of the
magnolia" His wife took position
where she could see him through the
glass door, and waited for the finale
which was expected in the shape of
the Gertrude whom her faithless
spouse was to meet. Time dragged
on wearily, and the lady became droW-
sy and at last fell into a dOZe, from
which she was aroused by the shrill
whistle of an approaching steamer
Nearer and nearer she came, and as
she rounded to, the name Gertrude,
in large, brightly painted letters, met
the view of the jealous wife, aud a
Stentorian voice, inquiring if Smith
was on hand, completed her awaken
ing.
AT glance the position was realiz-
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

ed. and the poor woman could have
cried for vexation as she saw her hus-
band and another gentleman hurried
ly @ansacting some business within a
few feet of her. At that moment a
tipsy negro came Stumbling along,
and seeing a woman's dress half hid
den among the bales and boxes of
merchandise, seized her, eXclaiming |!
Come out oh dar, ole gal J" Her
scream of terror brought her husband
to the scene, whose astonishment may
be imagined. She fell into his arms,
with hysierical burst OF sobs, and ex-
plantations ensued.
The party returned to their home
in hack, and somebody's head was
on somebody's bosom all the way
Since that time, all that Smith has to
do to avert a scolding, is to insinuate
that he will "meet Gertrude"
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

A DARKEY JURY.-At recent ses-
sion of the court in South Carolina, an
entire colored jury was empanelled. A
case was brought before them--the
witnesses examined and the attorneys
made their respective arguments. The
Judge after laying down the law, and
recapitulating the testimony, gave the
papers into the hands Of the foreman
an intelligent looking darkey-with
instructions to bring in verdict with
out delay.
Thirty minutes or more elapsed when
the Jury returned, headed by the fore
man, and stood before the Judge.
AS the foreman appeared to hesitate,
and to wear disappointed look, the
Judge asked
"Mr. Foreman, have you found a YER
dict ?''
"No Massa Judge, we haven't found
'em," replied the ebony juryman.
"It's very plain case," said the
Judge.
Cant help it, massa, couldn't see
it."
con what grounds ?"
awe didn't look into the grounds
Massa Judge" replied the puzzled fore
man; "de ossifer didn't take us out int
fairgrounds, but he took US into room
and locked us in and told us when VIZ
found de verdict, he would luff us out
So we began to find de verdict, and w
searched every nook, corner, crebice
and everything dar was in. dat room
but we found no verdict-no, Mass
Judge, dar was no verdict-noffin of d
| kind dar,"
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

FODDER FOR SToCK.--It is probable
that considerable land designed for
corn the present Spring will fail to be
planted on account of the prevalence
of wet weather. In such case, it would
be good plan to SOW corn for fodder
purposes. Good land will produce a
heavy burthen of this kind of food for
cattle. 1t is especially good for dairy
stock, and may be fed in green or in
a dry state. The sweet variety is con-
sidered the best, and it is richer and
eaten more readily than any other,
What is not used in green state may
be cut and dried for winter use. 1t
may be fed whole, or cut up and mixed
with something else, as circumstances
shall dictate.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

.Where are you going with that
miserable animal?" asked traveller
of a farmer who was dragging lean
wretched-looking horned sheep along
the road.
81 am taking him to the mutton,
mill to have him ground over," salo
the farmer.
''The n,utioqt-MW l never heard OF
such a thing. I will go with you ano
witness the process"
They arrived at the mill. The sheer
was thrown alive inte the hopper, and
almost Immediately disappeared. Ihey
then descended to lower apartment
and in few moments there were eject
O., y from spout in the ceiling, Jon
o,,o vters Of erceIle'& mutton, t'co S'de'
If m, ~'occo leather, a ocoot hat Of the eTs
c,,o1;h, a sleeps head handsomely
dressed j and taco elegantly cared fo'c
der-hOTnS.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
THE .KuLLQuICK RAILROAD"

The Omaha H6TGtd enlargeS upon the
superior attraction of this new rail-
road route, which, it says, has just
been completed, and will be open to
passenger traffic as soon as a proper
agent can be found to sell the tickets.
1t announces:
Through tickets daily for eternity,
and all stations beyond the grave,
connecting closely with the ferries at
the river StyX, for all points on the 9TH
er side of Jordan. Passengers should
take no other route. The cheapest
and shortest way to the tomb. 1t is
with great deal of pleasure that
the officers of this road announce its
completion.
This road has been carefully built
by experienced wOrkmen, who have
graduated at the best slaughter-house
in the land. The scenery along the
line is remarkably fine, consisting
principally OF yawning chasms,
charming precipices, and shaky tres
ties. The rails are laid very loose,
and without extra spikes, which,
when cars are going at full speed,
keeps the passenger in delightful mo-
ton, settles his dinner, and some
times his "hash" most effectually.
The coaches are full Of wood
which in case of accident, always splin-
ters, and thus give passengers hold
/ ing insurance tickets a chance to make
a little money, with an occasional prize,
! in case of death. The seats are con-
structed on an entirely new plan, being
made in the shape of coffin, so that
! the holder ola ticket, in case of acci-
| dent, can be Immediately boxed up and
sent home.
/ Thestov are ola new and unique
! patent, and known as the Railway
, Cooking Stoves. 1t is calculated that,
with a good fire first class passenger
can he thoroughly cooked in ten or tif-
/ teen minutes, although much more speed
can be attained if necessary.
The attention of the travelling public
is directed to the new and unique style
of tomb stones, furnished by this COM
pany to those purchasing through tick
cts.
4 large corps of undertakers at each
station, and elegant hearse cars accom-
pany each train.
The sleeping cars upon this road are
4 got up regardless of expenses, and pas
sengers can sleep without fear ofbeins
awakened by the noise of their conduc
tors.
In fact, most of our passenger
never wake up after once getting t.
sleep.
Wives having cross husbands
should have them purchase ticket
on this route they will never scOld a
gain.
The Government is about to do a
way with capital punishment, crimi
nails being furnished with tickets owe
this line.
Death is certain, and the system o
hanging is thus avoided.
Revolvers, poison, and butche
knives on each train for the amuse
~. tand use of patrons when they ar
fired {, friding.
No rena,'rs are allowed Oh coaches
the wheels, a.yyles and boilers beinI
used till they break or burst. tofo
ners on each train.
Collisions inevitable and explosion
sure. Persons wishing to reach th
mansions in the skies, ask for tickeu
Uid this line.
Life insurance tickets furnished graf
! is those desiring the same.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
INCIDENT OF THE H. CE1ENS READ.
ENGS.

An incident worth mentioning oc-
Cured in Carol all, the second night
oft Dickens readings. Ben. Butler
entered after the performance had COM
menced, and walked down the centre
aisle while Dickens was describing one
of the most interesting scenes in his
selections from David Copperfeld.-
Perhaps Benjamin was unavoidably
detained, or perhaps he wished to
make his appearance at the time when
he could attract that amount of atten-
tiOn which he thinks is due to his emf
nent abilities and great public services.
There are those who adopt this as one
of the ways of keeping before the peO-
pIe. some of them men of marked zeal
in religious affairs, who never enter the
church till the congregation is well
seated, and then walk straight to the
front pew. If General Butler hadn't
his minds eye on this idea on the occa-
sion referred to, his motives We're mis-
understood, that's all.
Well, the hero of Bermuda walked
down the aisle the observed of all obser-
vers, and took his seat in very select
and advantageous part of the hall. The
first selection was soon concluded, and
Mr.. Dickens retired as he was wont to
for ten minutes ofrest and refreshment.
The rustic and bus lie consequent upon
relaxation of attention tollowed.-
There were whisperings among the
older folks, and fiirtings among the
Younger, in the midst of which up rose
Butler from his seat, either to observe
or be observed, hard to tell which
| though | incline to the latter belief
There was no mistaking that bald head
or that strabismic eye. 1t was Benja
min F. Butler, and nobody else.
The intermission, like all things Oh
| this earth, had its end. Dickens appear
ed. and the readings were resumed
This tin,eit was a selection from Pick,
wick-tbo famous Bob Sawyer party
scene. 1t was verr funny, as we al
know, and the laughil. = was at 'lllie7
immoderate. There wasa opih'' no"
ever, at which the laugh beca. dS 'ei !
much like a vulgar roar, and " ''eN
the funniest part of the readings byan
means. Mr.. Dickens felt little con-
fused, | thought, for man of his nice
perceptions knows exactly where the
fun comes in, and we all know there is
such thing possible as laugh at the
expense of an actor, which is always
more vivid than that provoked by the
play. Dickens evidently thought he
had blundered. But he hadn't. He
had simply read the following colloquy
between Hopkins and Noddy-and the
audience had justseen Butler, and every
one knew he was present:
81 request that you'll favor me with
your card sir"
"I'll do nothing of the kind, sir"
"Why not, sir?''
"Because you'll stick it up over your
chimney-piece, and delude your visi-
tors into the false belief that gentle
man has been to see you, sir"
"Sir, a friend of mine-shall wait on
you in the morning"
"Sir, l am very much obliged to you
for the caution; and I'll leave particu-
lar directions with the servants to 1OOk
up the Spoons"
The laugh, Mr.. Dickens, which SO exy
ceeded all bounds as to preplex you,
was due solely to connection in the
popular mind between General Butler
andspoons =" Nacb," Wash. Cor, Gin.
COnlnercidi.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

FIELD WORK.-ClOver and Grass
seed may be sown on the winter grain.
Grain and grass fields may be rolled as
soon as the frost is out, thus resetting
the roots laid bare by the action of the
frost and wind, and sinking the small
stones. Flowing and narrowing may
he done when the ground is dry e.
nough. Potatoes may be planted on
warm, early land, being goodsized
seed not cut small, and if cut at all left
some days to 'hoal" before planting.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
Nm q. ,klesn recently spoke his

-"Dan, ST, 'AIes' ItCeHVIy SPoNV 1l'
niece at Mauc hester. N. H., and to
quiet some loud talk amoug the ladies
in the gallery, the chairman banged a
way upon the desk declaring that III
the ladies want to hear they must keep
quiet" To which one of the ladies re-
piled, in clear, ringing voice, Nv e
didn't come to hear, we came to see
the murderer" Poor Dan. was as
white as sheet, and his speech was
felt by his friends to be Il failure. lie
talked as though the ghost of q muf-
dered man hung before his eyes.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

The Radical conspirators have al
ready made up Ben Wade's Cabinet,
in anticipation of the overthrow Of
President Johnson for attempting to
get a legal decision upon the Tenure of
Office act.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

The large and extensive rolling
and nail mill at Bellair, Ohio, was
burned on Sunday mornings at 4o'clock-
supposed to be the work Of incendiar-
ism. Loss upwards of $4,000, par
TALLY covered by insurance.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

Gov. Oglesby, of Illinois, was the
first fool or knave to offer troops to the
Rump Congress. Geary is only a nase
imitator, and even copied, nearby. Ver'
batim, Oglesby's first sentence.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

If nature had intended that our
young ladies should bring their waists
to a circumference of twelve inches,
she would have dispensed with
double set of vital organs.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

JOB PRINTING, of every kind, done with
neatness and dispatch. The GAZETTE OFFICE has
lust been reftted with Power Press and new type,
and everything in the Printing line can be exeeu-
ted in the most artistic manner and at the lowest
ratcs.-TERMS CASH.
f-RS All letters should be addressd to
MEYERS & MENGEL,
Publishers
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27
TERMS OF PUBLICATION.

THE BEDFORD GAZETTE is published every Fri
isv morning by MEYERS & MRNsEL, at 200 per
annum, If paid strictly tn Gdr0'1ce SZ'oO II pald
within six months $500 if not paid wlthin SIX
months. All subscription accounts MUST be
settled annually. No paper will be sent out OF
the State unless paid for IN ADVANCE, and all such
subscriptions will invariably be discontinued at
the expiration of the time for which they are
paid
All ADVERTISEMENTS for less term than
three months TEN CENTS per line for each In
sertion. Special notices one-half additional All
resoluti, rs of Associations; communications OF
limited or individual interest and notices OF mar
riages and deaths exceeding five lines, ten cents
per line Editorial notices fifteen cents per line
AH legal Notices Of every kind, and Orphans
Court a,sd Judicial Sales are required By t@10
to be published in both papers pu6ltSheG m TINS
place
Ey- All advertising due after first insertion.
A IiheroI disoount is made to persons advertising
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1868-03-27

Sumner declares that "before westOp
we shall have stable government.
Judging from the number of asses at
the Capital, we are in need of such
convenience.