Bloomsburg democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1867-1869, 1868-11-11

concluded that 1t must be that terrible dis
ease known as the spinal complaint brough,
on by carrying too heavy panniers and sup.
porting long trails. l forthwith diligently
consulted all the medical works which trea,
of that ailmont, and accumulated all the in.
formation on the subject that l could, by
questioning, extract from the medical pro.
fession. With mind stored with useful
knowledge, and heart overfowing with
affection, / called to see the little sufferer
with the intention of imparting to her a
goodly quantity Of both.
She came into the parlor looking as though
she had been crimped with curling tongs.-
How pitied her. A few weeks before she
was as straight as an arrow, and natural
smile played around her rosebud mouth, in.
stead Of that constrained pucker Of pain, as
then supposed.
"IIow do you feel now, Jennie dcar?" l
said, in my most soothing tones. '.....
"Why, | feel good of course. Ohe could
nawt feel otherwise aftaw having enjawed
the wataw and societaw Of Saratcgaw."
81 admire your fortitude, Jennie, almost
as much as | deplore your misfortune, but
you may as well look the disaglecablo fact
in the face at once. This is the only way
to obviate it. / assure you it is not SO very
bad after all. The doctors say it can be
cured, or so nearly so that with iudicous
dressing it will never be noticed. You
know, Jennie, that it will make no differ
ence with me. As long as your heart re-
mains the same, no other change can infu-
ence me.
"What are you talking about2 Don't
understand you, pawsitvely."
Don't be goose, Mary Jane" (angrily)
'I know that women always deny that any
thing ails them. They think it is smart
But you can't conceal your complaint, and
considering our present relations | don't
think you ought to conceal an thing from
me-"
Mary Jane was getting mad. She has
vein in her forehead which is an unerring
temper bal ometer. 1t began to swell. That,
and an ominous glittering of the eyes, said
as plainly as an almanac, look out for squalls
about this time. She said energeticaly:
"My complaint !! Our present relations
Conceal nothing from you! Perhaps you
will be good enough to explain yourself;
that is, if you can."
My temper is not angelic. never set up
for saint, and Mary James perersity or
obstinacy, added in her manner, did not
make me in so heavenly frame of mind,
so / bur;ed out my sentiments as follows:
"You have curvature of the spine, as
every one that sees you must know. You
have it very badly, and you ought to do
something for it. Do, for heavens sake
send for doctor and get straight"
You should have seen the little hump
back cuss then. She walked the floor as
erect as liberty pole. She smiled sardon-
ically. She laughed Historically. Finally
she cried womanly, and then she found her
tongue her native tongue. No New York
drawl now, but each word as sharp and in
cisive as a cambria needle.
Curvature of the spine. Ha ha !! spine,
ha, spine," lin perfect shriek.) 20, you
provoking fool-there / just wish l was
man for few minutes"
II wish you was a sensible woman"
"Sense Well I admire to hear a BOBBY
that can't tell the Grecian Bend from the
spinal complaint-talk about sense"
"Grecian fiddle stick. You don't say
that that awful crook which you had in your
back was the Grecian Bend, assuming the
form of a rainbow again. No lady desires
to look like a ramrod. All the bellies Of
New York stoop gracefully, and leave stiff
ness and straight lines to chambermaids
and country folks"
81 suppose it was also from New York
fops and bellies that you learned the art Of
talking as though your mouth was full OF
hot mush.
Don't you talk about talking. You WHO
never leave Louisville, think its provincial
ism compromise the proper language, but
it is the ling OF your negro nurse. lcannot
stand it, never want to hear any more OF
it. 1t is my desire that our acquaintance
even should terminate with this interview"
And she sailed ont Of the room.
don't suppose it is any use to speculate
upon the humiliating spectacleto which love-
ly women may yet be reduced by fashion.
am convinced that their fate depends en-
tirely upon the whims and caprices Of the
fashion-mongers of Paris. The ladies have
never given US any evidence Of their desire
to avoid the ridiculous absurd dictates OF
fashion is, the moro eagerly and implicitly
her devotees follow her. No considerations
of heat or of cold, ofpropriety, Of affection
of comfort, or of anything else, can divert
them from the prevailing style. If the
Grecian Bend follows the natural law Of
fashion, it will get worse and worse, and it
will not be long until we see our sweet-hearts
with their heads hanging down like bowling
dovises. ... ...
I have taken tho porcelain picture OF
Mary Jane out Of its velvet case, and that
,,,.t,, o,SLat 10 now vacant. Her image,