The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1868-10-17

WIT AND WISDOM.

Prr two bellies together and they rarely
chime.
WHEr q man and woman are made one by
clergy mao, the question Is which Is the
oneg Sometimes there Is q long struggle
between them before this matter il finally
settled.
WHAT sort of serm 1n do you like y" said
DR.. Rush TO Robert Morris. " That kind Of
a sermon which drives man into the com
er Of bis pew, and makes him tninf the dew
ii is after him"
THERE l. no fortune 20 good bnt that n
may be reversed. and none 50 bad bul u
may be bettered. The sun that rises in the
clouds NAV set in splendor. and that 1hici
risestsstp tplendor may set in gloom.
"A LITTLE two year old girl, On being folh
that she was too little 70 have a muu, a-xrI
indignantly g Am too small 20 b. e0ldf
AN absent minded genrIernan intending NJ
scratch his head IN church, Iesche1 over
and performed the operation for an old
maid III tine next pew He discovered his
mistake when he found himself defendant
ia sn action for breach Of promise.
I BEER fills many bottle, the bottle hls
many q bier.
n
I being dunned D. a tailor TO pay Al least in-
terest on Ills bills, answered, it was not his
interest 20 pay the principIl nor Ill., priuci-
pie 10 pay the interest.
BRAsIDAs, the famous Lacedse.nonian gen
eral, caught a mouse; IT bit MN, aud bv
that means made its escape. 90 Jupiter {"
cried be, '@what creature 50 cOntemptible
but NAV have its liberty il it will contend
for it"
cAPrIyUs labOring man, ungratefui for
Jay Cookies national blessing" complains
that be bas to get up AZ hve-tweuy N tue
morning and wUrk till srven-tBirty aL night,
in order that the bond holder NAV breakfast
at ten-iorty, daRe At seven-thirty, ana en-
ljoy himself generally Ill tcn-fOrty Nc
night
As Alderman came To Dr. Franklin and
said be had a tendency 10 tie guut. king
what he could do 20 arrest II. Take a
bucket IL water and ton " cOal three
times a week, replied the doctor. " " hy,
how ~ replied the alderman IN aStouish-
ment. Drink cup of the former TIL eg
times day, and carry the latter up three
| fights of stairs"
PAT's idea II sympathy was good one.
I He mad long been trying to get Bridget &c
give him parting kiss. Finally, AZ last
resort, be turned away, saying, " GOJd-by,
Biddy Sure ye havn't any sympathy for
me at all, AZ all'' sympathy il itr And
what d'ye you name by that, Patrick -
Come here, Biddy, and l'li be afther tel
ling ye. When love We 90 that I'd like to
bite piece right out Of your swate cheek,
and We feels as a yea like TO have me DO
so-taats sympathy, be Jabbers ~ AL
/ Patrick you know my Uakensss Take a
| piece; but be sure and lave il, 80 that We
| can take il again when ye come Y''
| CROSSES OF LIFE AT Auburn, on Tues
\ day, the 18th ult-, the wife NJ Thomas
Cross gave birth to . daughter, this being
the seventeenth time that Mrs Cross has
made her husband happy father. wv.
Cross. on this occasion, sad, Amelia
Jaoe"-Mrs. Crosses christeDed nam H.
| Amelis Jane this Is not t. be beTne ~
- But it Is borne, nv dear, said his vile
meekIy. "Don't Ct angry, my love, We
all nave our little crosses 70 bear" Mr.
Cross grosned in the bitterness IF spirit:
Amelia jane, this thing has been gong
on long emo, "a, II YOU have any ID e little
crosses to bear shan't help you ~ sup
port them.