The Portland daily press., 1868-02-06
Miscellany.
Jila yvoifo's Adventure.
BY MARK TWAIN.


knew by the sympathetic glow upon his
bald head knew by the thoughtful look up
on his face-I knew by the EN- otional flush
upon the strawberry on the end OF the old
free liyers nose, that Simon Wheelers mem
DRY was busy with the olden time. And so
prepared TO leave, because all these were
symptoms of a reminiscence-signs yAat he
was going to be delivered of another Of his
tiresome personal eXpereuces-but was too
slow; he got the start OF me. As nearly as
can reeollect, the intiction was couched in
the following languages
I'VE was all boys then. and didn't care for
nothing only how TO shirk school and keep up
a reVivin' state of devilment all the time
Thish-yar Jim Wolfe was talkin about, was
the prentice and he was the best hearted iel-
low, he was, and the most torgiyin' and on
selfish ever see-we there couldn't be a
more butler boy than what he was, take him
how You would and sorry enough Was when
] see him for the last time.
me and Henry was always Fostering him
and plastering hand bills upon his back and
putting bumble-bees in his bed, and so on, and
sometimes we'd crowd in and bunk with him.
Notwithstanding his growing, and then we'd
let on - get mad and fight across him so as
10 Keep him stirred up like. He was nine
teen, he was, and long, and lank. and bashtul.
and we was fifteen and sixteen, and tolerably
lazy and worthless.
$50 that night, you know. that my sister
Mary gave the candy pullin,' they started us
of to bed early, SO as the company could have
full swing, and we run in on Jim 60 have
some fun.
sour window looked out onto the roof of
the ell, and about ten O'Clock a couple of old
tom cats got TO rarn' round on it and carryin'
on like sin. There was four inches of snow
on the roof, and it was froze so that There
Nc a rNhf m cvr,sf of; .a - -
moon was shinin' bright and we could see
them cats like daylight. First they'd stand
off and e-yowyow, just The same as If they
was cussin' one another, you know, bow un
their backs and bush up their tails. and swell
around and spit, and then all of sudden the
gray cat he'd snatch a handful OF tur off the
yaller cats ham, and spin him around like
the button On the barn door. But the WALLER
cat was game, and he'd come and clinch. and
the way they'd scratch and bite. and howl
and the way they'd make the fur fly was pow.
erfnl..
Well, dim he got disguised with the row
and lowed he'd climb out there and shake
EN- of n that roof He hadn't RELY no no.
ton of doing ", likely, but we eYerlastingly
logged nm and bullyrag'd him, and lowed he
always Dragged how he wouldn't take a dare.
and SO on, till bimeby he histed up the winder
and 10! and behold, out he went-went inst
as he was-nOthing on but shirt, and that
was short. You ought to a seen him! You
ought to seen him cre-e-pin over that ice.
and diggln his toe-nails and his finqer-pails
in Tor to keep him from slippin: and above
all you ought TO seen that shirt a fiappin' in
the WIND, and them long ridiculous shanks Of
hisn slistening in the moonlight.
Them company folks was down there nm
der that 'ornery shed of dead Washington
Bower vines-ail sett'n round about two 3Ioz-
en- sassers OF hot candy, which they SGT in the
snow TO cool. And they was lanehin, and
tali1n, lively; but bless You, they didn't know
nothing about the panorama that was goin,
on over their heads. Well Jim, he went .
sneakit' up, onbeknownst to them tom cats
they was swishing their tail and yow-vowin'
and threatenln' to clihch you know, and not
pawn any attention-he went a sne-akin'
and sne-akin' right up to the comb of fine
1901, I'll ne was In loot and hall of em.
and then all of q sudden he made crab foe
the yaller cat! But, by gosh, he mjssod fra
and slipped his holt, and his heels few nm
and he Hoped on bis back and shot oflTn tba1
roof like darti-went smashin, and n
crSshfn' down thro' them old rusty vines and
headed right in the dead center of all them
company people ;--sot down like yearth
quake In them two dozen sassers Of red hot
candy, and let OFF a howl that was bark rom
the tomb. The girls-weil, they left. Won
know. They see he warn't dressed for com
pany, aud SO they lett. And done in sec
ond; II was just one little war whoop. and a
whisk! of their dresses, and blame the wench
Of 'em was in sight anywhere. v-sss
Jim he was in sight. lie was eormed
with the bilin' hot molasses CANDY clean
down to his heels, and had more busted sas-
sers hangin' to him than If he was .Tanan
Prlncess-and he came prancine IN stairs
just whoopin' and cussin' and every INN
he give he shed some china, and every sollirm
he fetched he drlpped some candy.
Aud blistered! Why, bless your soul that
poor creature couldn't RELY set down com.
tortably for as much rs four weeks"