Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1868-09-18
Breuifies.
Miscellaneous Items.

MtSctfthutOus httHfS.
"A good person TO bear witness-A servant
girl.
Can well-read lawyer be styled sound
limb?
Can well-behaved male eel be called
gent-eel?
Ought not witnesses to be defined the
state OF being witty.
Many men like many horses are about
this time long of wind.
The plane we like to meet persons on
The plane of inclination.
The first star engagement-When the
morning stars sang together.
"A young woman separated from her lover
is naturally melancholy because she can't
eIope.
Why are cigars hike the great departed?
Because columns are raised above their
ashes.
The shipments of hay from New York
to Great BriJain have been resumed ON
large scale.
The first question that ever disturbed men
was the woman question, and it will probably
be the last.
1t has been stated by savan that Pom
rsll and Herculaneum were destroyed over
l2,OOO years ago.
"A western editor, seeing two washerwo-
men quarreling, quoted Tennyson: Wiring
out, wild bellies
The New York Times states that some OF
the leading publishers have lost on every
book published within year.
1t may be stated as general rule that
persons whose acquaintance are most diff
cult to make are best worth knowing.
The Chinese were so delighted with their
visit to the Cambridge (Mass) Observatory
that it was hard to persuade them to leave it..
An ignorant little urchin told his Sunday
school teacher that John the Baptist was q
cannibal, because he ate low cusses and wild
honey.
Dartmouth College has promised larger
incoming freshman class than for many
years past. Fifty have already been admit
ted.
An English town was lately visited with a
storm of snails. 1t lasted about ten minutes
and covered the ground with small shelled
snails similar to sea snails.
Says tasteful editor: The first nine hun
dred aud ninety-five thousand times we heard
champagne Charlie" we liked it, but now
we are beginning to tire OF it.
"A workingmen's convention is called to
assemble in Londen. One object it has in
view is to aid i'll returning, ifpossible, at least
dozen bona tide worklngmen to Parliament.
-Euphemism is high art in California. A
paper of that state speaks of an enterprising
and highly successful murderer as having "a
wonderful talent for bereaving any family he
does not happen to like
An illustrated Paris paper publishes en-
cravings of the feet of certain famous ballet
girls, who, it is said, have TO pay a round
price for the insertion. Some of the young
ladies refuse to furnish pictures of their
feet
"A lady advertises for sale one baboOn,
three tabby cats and a parrot. She states
that, being now married, she has no further
use for them, for the reason that their ami
able qualities are all combined in her hus-
band.
1t is said that the old mineral spring at
BallstOn has been rediscOvered, and COM
pany will undertake to resuscitate the fashion
able reputation of the village. Ballston was
once tar more popular than Saratoga-lndeed,
it was smart town before Saratoga was
bought of.
"A race of singular character took place
at the Driving Park, Lincoln, H., on Monday
last. A man was matched to run two hun
dred and twenty yards while horse was to
make four hundred and forty yards, both to
start at the sound of bell. The man won
an easy victory.
"A rather fast youth was relating the ex-
perience of his voyage across the Ocean to a
sympathizing friend. Said he, Il tell You
what, old fellow, there's one good thing about
it, though. You can get as tight as you
please every day, and everybody thinks you're
only seasickl"
city railroad companies has made a PROPOSE
ton to its conductors to fix the amount of
fares they shall be required to return as col
lected each day at certain figure, and let
them take what they can collect beyond that
amount in lieu of wages.
1T has been decided that the sooty. but
wealthy Pittsburgers are to have park of 400
acres for pedestrian equestrian and Jehu poT-
poses. 1t is very truly remarked that none
of the locations named for il are too far from
the city. All who have seen that city of coal
dust will agree with this remark.
Upon a whaling bark which sailed from
New London the other day was young man
who arrived in New York from ten years
residence in China and California on June 20,
having III his possession $40, 875. He took to
gambling, invested too much money in the
'faro bank, and upon July Goth he was PEN
niless.
Newspaper correspondents are becoming
scarce in Affghanistan. In June two persons
were arrested on suspicion of plying that
VOCATION" and arraigned before the Emir,
who sent them at once to the public execu-
toner. Their heads we're fixed on poles and
placed at the gates of the town, where the
sentence had been carried out, as warning
to all persons ambitious of journalistic noto-
riety.