davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
A "Reminiscences.

In the summer of 1868 a gentleman
wrote from St. Louis to friend in Boston
as follows. He had been describing a
trip by steamboat from Hannibal to st.
Louis:
"There were soldiers aboard. You
should have heard the way an Iowa private
(born in New Hampshire, and genuine
nasal Yankee,) took down copperhead
Congressm who was cursing New Eng
land. The fellow listened awhile until he
boiled over, and then he burst out on him
I can't stand that Why don't you have
word of condemnation for the ID
rebels? I came from New England and
have been two years fighting the rebels,
and I can't hear any man talk in that style 7
Other soldiers edged up behind him, MUIR
muring That's right! The copperhead!
ETC.; and the fellow went on in the greatest
excitement-a real Yankee Inspiration
with all the fervor of an excited schoolboy
speaking piece at school, and in the same
style; but it was genuine, and it did the
business. The Congressman had to ex-
plain it all away, and asked was that sat
isfactory?' Yes says the fellow, Il sup
pose shall have to be satisfied with that.
But should like to hear you say now,
Damn the rebels; let them starve !" (that
had been his phrase about New England)
and the man had to come out and do it!
His name was Eldridge, a newly elected
copperhead Congressman from Wisconsin.
shall be curious to watch him. | had to
go up and congratulate the private after
ward; he was right good, awkward fell
low, and took it all very modestly."
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
/" Come Down.

We were much amused, the other day
by an anecdote of certain Secretary of a
Governor, several removes backward from
the present Chief Magistrate of the Empire
State. Like most sub officials, to whom
some "pressing" final process is com.
mitted, he had an itching palm, while,
at the same time, it would not be exactly
safe to show his hand too openly. On one
occasion he had, for the third time been
waited upon by an impatient party, inter
ested in two important bills which had
passed the Legislature, and, with sundry
others, were awaiting the Governors sig
nature.
"Did you place my bills before his Elk
cellency?" asked the party of the Secre-
tary.
@N-n-not yet" said he, Che had a
slight impeachment in his SPECIFY; "n-not
quite yet; the G-g-overnors VERY
busy. By the bly,, w-what was the
n-name of the m-man that g-got up
into a t-tree, when our Savior was
w-walking along that w-way?"
ooh, you mean Zaccheus?"
"Ye-es; that's the man. Well, do
you r-recollect what was s-said to him %
Certainly; 'Zaccheus, come down."
Ex-a-actly; yes, Come doom 2 !
was thinking of that ye-esterday, when
you c-called, but c-cOuldn't rem-mem-
Der the name"
The hint was taken; the party "cdnot
doom" accordingly; and when he next
called his signed bills were ready for him.
Tile GaJdrN.
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

Hiz guides would mourn for him then,
and sarch for him, but biz family soon got
reconciled tew the loss.
Everybody sed, WHARF he lived, that he
was the happiest critter that had ever bin
discovered yet, with nothing tew do but
work, and kind guide tew watch over
him awl the time, and mourn for him
when he got lost. A I
But the Blak Man is a very phoolish
critter. %sst N
After 200 years ov this bliss, he grew
cross tew hiz guides, and wouldn't follow
the guides, and the konsequentz is, that
the guides have got mad, and am afrade
that the Blak Man will have tew take care
ov himself now.
He will find it very different from what
it was before ,,s s
He haz got tew educate his own yung
ones now, and learn them how tew spell
correktly, one Ov the most difficult things
in the world; and he haz got tew vote, and
keep hiz familee together, and pay when he
rides in the street kars. fsg
/ am afrade the Blak Man haz made a
mistake if he haz, it liz bad one, for hiz
guides never will take him into their hands
agin-no never They are mad, and don't
like the way the Blak Man quit them, when
they wuz driv with bizness, and after they
had took so much care ov him for so menny
years., a s aT
feel sorry for the guides; they alwus
seemed tew have great interest in the
Blak Man; but they are mad now, and
don't kno az blame them much, for Blak
ingratitude liz the poorest kind ov pay
x X X < x
1t perhaps would be well enuff for me
to staff, for the benefit ov new beginners,
that the Blak Man formerly resided in
Afrika, before he cum here to look for
work
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
SubsoiIing-A Defense Against Drouth.

The theory of subsoil-plowing has been
frequently explained il the Agrsc'@tur'5st,
and the practice has been advocated for
the last quarter of century. NeVerthe-
less, the use of q sub-soil plow is a rarity
on American farms, and almost always
marks really progressive farmer. The
action of a mole near the surface repre-
sents tolerably well the manner in which
a sub-soil pillow works, only at such
depth that little or no elevation of the top
soil is visible, while more ground is moved
in proportion. These plows are usually
employed following in the furrow of q
common pillow, and driven as deep as the
team is capable of drawing them. Crops
upon land thus prepared are much more
likely to send their roots deeply, to gain
more nutrinlent, to sustain themselves du-
ring drouth, and to mature heavier crops,
than where subsoiling is not practiced.
Indeed, the only circumstances under
which a sub-soil pillow does not work to the
advantage of the crops, is on very light,
thin, leachy land, and where the water
stands within a few inches of the surface.
For corn, potatoes, and roots, this prepare
ton is expedient, and for the latter class
OF crops especially so. Sub-soil plows are
OF steel and cast iron, and are of either the
lifting or mole patterns. The lifting sub
soil plows may have wing (Which takes
the place of a mould-board in common
pl0Ws), on one or on both sides of the
standard. There is great diversity of
sizes, from the admirable little one-horse
plows, used to run between the rows of
root crops and potatoes after the ground
has been compacted by the horse hoe or
cultivatOr, to those requiring team of
three or four horses to draw them There
is not a crop which the subsoil plow may
not greatly benefit, either in the prepare
ton of the soil or in the summer culture.
Am. AgricuZtarist ~ a
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

that these shades, these modified mokes,
are the posterity Nv whiteAmen? Deekin,
shood yoo cast yoor beamin eye over this
assemblage, woodent it rest parentally and
lovinly onto yoor own posterity? Oh,
Deekin, eff 700 go back on the reso-
looshen which 700 yoonanimously
voted for, don't l beg nv 700,
go back onto nacher Don't desert
yoOr childrin. Don't turn def ear to
the pleadins Nv nacher, or blind eye to
her applications Hannibal. Pogram, go
and beg yoor father to permit 700, his
posterity, skarcely blacker than he and
cussid site handsomer, to mix in this yere
caucus sa
The Deekin Indignantly left the room,
and follered SCOT, witch eggsample wuz
follered by all Nv us. Bigler and Pollock
remained, and nominated ticket NV these
halfbleached cusses making it up entirely
Nv the .Pogram, .Gavitt and Punt niggers,
ez these names, they sed, he'd weight in
the county, Who will deliver us from
these two bodies Nv death.
PETROLEUM V. MASSEY, P. NJ,
(Which Is Postmaster.)
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

formation upon the subject, from time to
time, as you may desire it and the Post
Office Department be enabled to furnish it
to me. t xeeaiH 81
ss every truly, ETC.,
bs MARX TWAIN.
Z "sFor James w. Nye, U. S. Senator
There-now, aohat do you think of
that ?"
"Well, 1 don't know, sir. It-well, it
appears to me-to be dubious enough"
"Du-leave the house! I am ruined
man. Those Humboldt savages never will
forgive me for tangling their brains up
with this inhuman letter. have lost the
respect of the Methodist Church, the Board
Of Aldermen"
"Well, 1 haven't anything to say about
that, because may have missed it little
in their cases, but aoas too many for the
Baldwin's Ranch people, General p
"Leave the house Leave it forever and
forever, too !"
/ regarded that as a sort of covert init
nation that my services could be dispensed
with, and so resigned. l never will be
private Secretary to Senator again. You
can't please that kind of people. They
don't know anything. They can't appre-
ciate a party's efforts. MARK TWAIN.
THE GdlaTY 5t.la
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
The " Blak Man."

Ii II JOck1 blIllNtfo.
The Blak Man emigrated tew this free
and Plus kuntry about 200 years formerly,
in the lower story of a vessel > he wuz
kindly furnished with a free ride, and
sum rice and water for vittles
lmmegiately upon his arrival he COM
menced bizzness, for other folks, on our
Eastern coast and had plenty tew do.
He wuz very Economical in his habits
ov clothes, wearing but flu, and those sell
dom made out of cashmere.
Ee OCCASIONALLY changed his lokation,
moving into an adjoining State, but in
these journeys he was always Kindly fur
nished with guide, so that there wuz no
danger Nv his Citing lost.
In these trips he seldum took his family
with him; they were either allowed to re-
main at hum, eor made excursions in
search of work tew other States, under the
guidanse of experienced guides. 49, .rr
Once in while the Blak Man would
stray away to the cold and bitter North,
and git cruelty lost.
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
MARK TWAIN'S SECRETARYSHIP.

| am not Private Secretary to a Sena-
tor any more, now. held the berth two
months in security and in great cheerful
ness of spirit, but my bread began to return
from over the waters, then-that is to say,
my works came back and revealed them
selves / judged it best to resign. The
way of it was this My employer sent for
me one morning tolerably early, and, as
soon as l had finished inserting some con-
undrums elandestinely into his last great
speech upon finance, entered the presence.
There was something portentous in his
appearance His cravat was united, his
hair was in state of disorder, and his coun.
tenance bore about it the signs of sup
pressed storm. He held a package of let
tiers in his tense grasp, and | knew that the
dreaded Pacific mail was in. He said:
Thought you were worthy of conf
dence."
i said: Eyes sir" -
He said: II gave you a letter from GER
tain of my constituents in the State of Ne
vada, asking the establishment of a post
office at Baldwin's Ranch, and told you to
answer it, as ingeniously as you could with
arguments which should persuade them
that there was no real necessity for an of
flee at that place."
/ felt easier. ooh, if that isall, sir / did
that"
Eyes, you did | will read your answer,
for your own humiliation:
WASHINGTON, Nov "a, 1867.
81 Messrs. Smith, Jones and hers. 86 saZ
GENTLEMEN: What the mischief do
you suppose you want with post-ofice
at Baldwin's Ranch? 1t would not do
you any good. If any letters came there,
you couldn't read them, you know; and,
besides such letters as ought to pass
through, with money in them, for other
localities, would not be likely to get
through, Won must perceive at once and
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
HOME, FARM AND GARDEN.

An experienced horticulturist recon-
mends that iron shavings scrap-iron, and
the scales and dust from blacksmiths'
shops, be dug in around pear trees, and al
so that the bodies be repeatedly washed
with solution of srlphate of iron for the
purpose of destroying fungi. aAsae'~
Col. Horace Capron, Commissioner of
Agriculture, is decidedly down on dogs.
From reliable data he estimates that there
are seven millions of these -"useless ami
mails " in the United States, the mainte
nance of which involves an annual eX7
penditure of fifty millions in greenbacks.
In his recent report he states that in 1866
at least eight hundred thousand sheep
were either killed or injured by these ours
Of low degree. In consequence he has
no patience with Tray, Blanche or Sweet
heart.
Speaking Of fowls for the table, the
AgricMturG Annudl says: First of all
we must place the Gray Dorking, the
White Dorking coming close after,
both of which are good sitters and mothers
Next, in all probability, for full grown
chickens, come the French fowls, which
are poor as Donsitters. For early broilers
the very earliest spring chickens-no
fowls are equal to the Brahmas, dark and
light and various breeds Of Cochins-buff,
partridge, lemon, etc. These make also
heavy and good fowls, which fatteR well
for the spring market. The Brahmas and
Cochins are hardy breeds; the hens are
good winter layers and persistent settlers,
but clumsy mothers The Dorkings fat
ten very easily and quickly, and in this
particular are hard pressed by the French
fowls. The first cross of Dorkings with
the India fowls, Brahmas and Cochins, are
unsurpassed large table fowls.
"A correspondent of the Americon AZ
riculturist gives the following account Of
potato exp eriment: II planted side by
side, of the Early Goodrich variety, first,
sets or cuttings made entirely from the
seed ends of medium sized potatoes, the
cuttings containing about two eyes each,
and planted two in a hill second, two-eye
cuttings, made entirely from the stem ends
of potatoes; third, aoh0le large potatoes. The
whole potatoes came up first, and kept
week ahead of the others through the sea-
son. Between the cuttings made from the
seed and stem ends, no difference could be
perceived either through the season or
when they were dug. If the cuttings from
the tips had consisted of as large pieces as
those made from the butts, it might have
been different, but as the eyes were thicker
on that end. they could not be made SO
large. But when the rows that were
planted with whole and large seed were
dug, it was found that the yield was one
seventh larger by measure, but that the
increase was mainly in small and unmar-
ketable potatoes, and that the large ones
were not as smooth in appearance as in
the other rows. Ialso tried cuttings from
the seed and stem ends of the Harrison,
side by side, and saw no difference"
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
atiseeitaau.
ANDY JOHNSON.

Hoo IL that man hoo used tn bee
A taller down in Tennessee
An sighed for populariteey
Andy johnson.
Hoo was it struggled long tn re,
And iii with SELF the nashun's lie
And mingle with the CRATE ana VIE
Andy Johnson.
Hoo WIZ il. when Rebellion roze,
And stalkt abrod with awl its woe,
Took sides agenst the Unions foze!
Andy johnson.
Hoo tbot that such koarse wood send
His name tn earth's remotest end,
AZ Freedoms most devoted friend:
Andy johnson.
Hoo was it got, by means rhfare,
Into the Prezidenshal chare,
An shode traitors hand while tharc?
Andy johnson.
Hoo wuz it tribe while to sho
That he wuZ Moses, so-an-so.
But proved hisself Pharaoh?
Andy Johnson.
Hoo wuz it that, with rebel ade,
The Union Party haz betrade.
An cast JEFF. Davis in the shade?
Andy Johnson.
Hoo wuz it that, as PRECEDENT.
Of these United States wuz bent.
To sho HE wUz THE GOVERNMENT:
Andy johnson.
Hoo Hikes old Bourbon-Gist the smellD
UoOZe actions awl so clerely tell.
He'd love tn bee king so well?
Andy johnson.
Hoo tride the Hero Grant to spoil,
An catch brave Stanton in his coil,
An Reconstruction plans tn foil?
Andy johnson.
Hoo finds out, when quite tn late,
The PEOPLE think him NOT so CRATE,
That he shood miss a traitors fate:
Andy johnson.
Hooze name will travel down through time,
z Threw every nation, every cline,
All dark with infamee and crime?
Andy Johnson.
Loyaltown, Aprile, is hundred an IS.
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

1t is reported that the conductor OF
the sleeping car, which was burned up at
the late disaster near Port Jervis, states
that there were twenty-three passengers
in the rear coach that was completely de-
stroyed by fire. So far as had been ascer-
tanned, but two persons escaped from this
car, and tho remains of six only had been
recovered This leaves fifteen Of whom
there was no trace
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

ITO CONSUNIPTIVES.-TheR Rev. EDWARD A.
L WILSON will send Gree of CHARGE to all who de-
and using the simple remedy by which he cured OF
lung affection and that dread disease, Consumption
His only object is to benefit the afflicted and he hopes
every sufferer will try his prescription as it will cost
dress Rev. EDW ARD A WILSON, No. 165 South
Second street, Williamsburgh, New York.
TNFORMATION.- Information guaranteed to
4 produce uxurant growth of hair upon bald head
or beardlesS face; also recipe for the removal of
Pimples, Blotches, Eruptions &C. the Skin, leaving
the same SOFT clear and beautiful can be obtained
without charge by addressing TH0S. F. CHAPMAN,
CHEMIST, S23 Broadway, New York 1900
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
Medical Illumination.

-Four Magnincently Illustrated Medical Books, con-
tanning Important Physiological information, for Men
dressing DRsJOH1y VANDEEPOOz, No. 80 Clinton
Place, New York City
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08
V
Nasty.

A CONVENTION AT THE CORNERS TO NOA1-
NATE COUNTY TICKET-HOW JOE Big
LER PERVERTED THE RESOLUTION UsU-
i ALLY ADOPTED AT SUCH CONVENTIONS.
Posi- OFFS, CoNFDRIT x ROADS,
(Which is in the State NV Kentucky,
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

MANUFACTURERS sell a Combined
w Square, Plumb Level and Bevel. Something new
and very saleable. Great inducements offered Coun-
ty Rights for sale the most liberal terms For par
ticulars, address w. S. BATCHELDER Pittsburgh,
Penn. For county rights in the State of Indiana, apply
to T. S. SHURIcK, Fort Wayne, Indiana.
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

RARREL MACHINERY:.,E,-G ree sr rgg1,9sp
Slack work. G. L. BENTON'S PATENT CONVEX
EMERY WHEELS, for Cumming and Sharpening
Saws. JOHN GREENWOOD, Rochester Bafrei Ma
chine Works. Rochester, N T.
Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-05-08

"
"That is an atrocious, ruinous epistle |!
Distraction"
"Well, sir, am really sorry if there is
anything wrong about it-but-but-it ap-
pears to me to dodge the waterloo ques-
ton"
dodge the mischief! Oh but never
mind. AS long as destruction must come
now, let it he complete. Let it be COM
plete-let this last of your performances,
which am about to read, make fnality
of it. I am a ruined man. had my mis-
giyings when gave you the letter from
Humboldt, asking that the post route from
Indian Gulch to Shakespeare Gap and in
termediate points be changed partly to the
old Mormon trail But told you it was a
delicate question, and warned you to deal
with it deftly-to answer it obviously, and
| leave them a little in the dark. And your
fatal imbecility impelled you to make this
| disastrous reply. / should think YOU
would stop your ears, if you are not dead
| to all shame:
WASHINGTON, Nov 30, 1867.
Messrs Perkins, Wagner, ct al:
GENTLEMEN: 1t is delicate question
about this Indian trail, but handled with
proper dizziness and dubiousness, doubt
not we shall succeed in some measure or
otherwise, because the place where the
route leaves the Lasseu Meadows, over be-
yond where those two Swanee chiefs, Di-
| lapidated- Vengeance and Biter-of- the
| Clouds, were scalped last winter, this being
the favorite direction to some, but others
preferring something else in consequence
of things, the Mormon trail leaving Mos
by's at three in the morning, and passing
through Jawbone Flat to Butcher, and
then down by jug. Handle, the road pass
ing to the right of it, and naturally leaving
| it on the right, too, and Dawson's on the
left of the trail where it passes to the left
of said Dawson's, and onward thence to
| Tomahawk, thus making the route cheaper,
easier of access to all who can get at it, and
comprising all the desirable objects SO con-
sidered by others, and, therefore, comforting
the most good upon the greatest number,
and, consequently, ] am encouraged to
hope we skau. However, I shall be ready,
] and happy, 70 afford you still further in
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1868-07-03
MARKETS.

PHILADEIPHrA, June %. No change 70 re-
cord in the flour market, there being little or
no demand except for higher grades for sup
ply Of home consumptioni sales Of 700 ppl7' ,,5
Northwest extra family at 80 75tG llper oDl,
latter figure for choice Minnesota 2 bbil5,
Peuua. and Ohio do. do. at S10@l2 small ~
lots Of fancy at $l2 50@14 90; extra at 30 !, ~ ~
agg so and super6pe at 81 25G1S so. Rye
-four is selling at 50 I2lG9 25. In corn
meal there is nothing doing TO fix quotations. i
The wheat market is very quiet, there Delns
no de ire on the par. Of the trgde to operate
at present prices; red is uomtna'ly hsia ~
81 35Gt2 40, aud amber 8 10. 300 ous.
Pennsylvania Rye sold at 81 %, an advance
of Zoe. In Corn there is but liIile movement
sales Of 700 bushels good prime yellow al : !
Io0l IA. and I4O0 bushels do. on secret
terms. Western mixed may be quoted nom nom
inal at 81 1901 II. Oats are firm at 90'g
81 cents
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1868-07-03

The PITTsBUReH AND CoSSELLsvIfLg
RAuRolD.-We cut the following items in
regard TO this road from the Somerset Herald
and IVAig of the 24th inst:
''We learn that this week, the engineers
proceed along the whole line, remarking the
locations, &c, for a speedy letting. And that
TIE work viii at once be commenced at the
Sand Patch Tunnel by Mr. Humbert; aud
that the Brooks and Pinkerton tunnels, also
in this county, will be commenced at an early
day. Thus she heavy sections viii be put in
a state Of forwardness, so that the whole line
can be finished next year.
The activity and zeal Of the Baltimore &
Ohio Railroad Co., its President, and the city
Of Baltimore, superadded to the industry and
efficiency Of President Hughart, all give ia.
vorable indications of an early completion Of
this important work"
''IN TowX.-J G. Harvey, Esq, of Balti,
more is here looking after the Glades Bntter
interest, ana brings US the cheering news OF
the prospects of the early completion OF the
Pittsburgh & Counellsyille Rail Road. He
reports Mr.. Hughart's success in getting
S350,000 of the Bonds taken in Baltimore
last week with fair prospects of securing the
balance at an early day. Messrs. j. G.. Har.
yey s. Co. subscribed $4,000 to the main line
Of the road, and promise fair subscription to
our Branch road. This should be an incen-
tive to all who have more direct interest in
the branch road to come forward aud subscribe
literally, as the enhancement of the value of
property of Somerset and the surrounding
country depends on the early completion of
this branch"
''ME. SCUIL writes us from Pittsburgh, un-
der date of 22d, that work will be immediate
ly resumed on the ConneIlsyille Railroa,
An engineer corps goes into the field this
week, for the purpose of resetting the stakes,
&c. along the line. The contractor at the
Sand Patch Tunnel has been instructed to
resume work at once, and forty miles, com
prising the heaviest sections between the
Tunnel and Connelsyille, will be let to con.
tract, as soon as proper notice inviting pro-
posals can be advertised. and bids examined.
Heavy subscriptions to the bonds of the com
pauy are being made in Baltimore, and at
other points along the line, and in few days
all the money necessary to insure the co m
pletion Of the road within tlrenty months viii
have been obtained. The Vaccinations of
the Penna. Central, and the Fort Wayne and
Chicago have come to naught, and within two
years, a through line from Bremen to Chca-
go and the far west, via Baltimore and Pitts
burgh, will be an accomplished fact"