Vermont daily transcript. [volume] (St. Albans, Vt.) 1868-1870, 1868-05-14
7Ne Josh billings Pdpcrs--Snm
N0fIUi History.

land; he liz too useless n critter to be
born there.
He belongs down South, and resides
i'm the same swamp that the copperhead
duz.
He lives upon a raw pig, and don't
hesitate to take them whole, if there
don't happen to be smaller one on
hand.
He is also fond of little niger once
in while, by way offresh bite.
They are amphibious, and several
other kinds of cuss tew plenty tn men
shen.
What on earth they are good for |
don't seem to know, unless it is tew
watch for pigs
Their hides can be tanned into leath-
err but they are as hard to skin as II
beech tree IL; and the leather when
tanned liz Jest about as Timber as a cook
i'm stove. But one pair ov boots made
out ofalligatorwillla last as longasa mans
name duz The only way to wear them
out is to heave them away.
Alligator meat is not luscious. If you
ask for il at a fust klass hotel the alwus
tell yu "that they are just out.N 1t
tastes rs | should think the beef NV
mule would who had been worked for
ty years in brick yard, and then been
struck by lightning to get rid NV him.
When the alligator's mouth is wide
open, the head IL just about in the cen
ter NV his body; but they have one vir-
few | came very near fOrgetting-they
make very still noise, altho they have
more jaw than any other critter know
NV.
These are some of the heaviest fakts |
have been able tn gather about the ali
gator.
The alligator seems to be second adj
dition NV the krokadile, made out NV
what was left.
] think the krokadilc usually lays
eggs when they want some more krolla-
dies, but | don't kno-but if they do
and l ever find the nest, and the old fell
low amt on the nest, | shouldn't hesi-
tate to hatch out the eggs myself-with
klub.
This is all kno at present about the
alligator.
Next to the monkey, the crow has
the most deviltry to spare. they are
born very wild, kan be tanned az easy az
the goat kan, but a tame crow is aktual-
ly worse than sore thumb.
If there is emmy thing about the house
that they kantget into, it IL because the
thing aint big enuf. | had rather watch
IL ShOOl tlidll Vic lulllc CIOW -
Crows live on what they kan steal, and
they will steal emmy thing that aint tied
down.
They are fond Nv meat vittles, and
are the first to hold an inquest over a
departed horse or still sheep. They
are fine bird to hunt, bnt hard one
to kill they kan see yu2 miles first, and
will smell gun rite thro the side NV a
mountain.
They are not songstirs, althO they
have good voice to cultivate but what
they do sing they seem to understand
thoroughly; long practss has made
them perfect.
The crow is a turf bird, and can stand
the heat like a blacksmith, and cold like
stun wall.
They bid their nests among "A tree,
and lay twice, and both eggs would
hatch out if they were laid in snow
bank-ther aint no such thing az stop.
ping a young crow.
Crows are very lengthy. l believe
they live always. | never knu one tC
die natral deth, and don't believe they
kno how.
They are always thin in flesh, and arc
like an old injun-rubber shew, poor in
side and out
They are not considered fine eating
dltllO utNc ICttO SOlllc W llclc NV DllCN
crow, but still / never heard Ov the same
man laundering for som billed crow :
times.
This essa on the crow is copied from
natur, and if it liz true amt to blame
for it; natur made the crow, didn't; i
l had 1 would have made her more hon
est and not quite so tuft.
Leads mel to remark, in the fust place
that thus far they are suckcess.
They are domestick, and occasionally
are tuff.
often enuf in their Younger daZe bu
the hen aint tew blame for this.
Billed hen is universally respected.
There is CRATE deal of originality tev
in the hen-eXactly how much | kan
tell, historians fight so much about it
Sum say KnOwer had hens with him il
the ark, and some say he didn't. So /
goes, which and luther.
L kant tell yu which was born fust
the hen or the egg sumtimes l thinl
the egg wuz, and sumtimes | think
don't kno, and l kant tell now which i
right for the life of me.
Laying eggs is the hens best grip.
A hen that kant lay eggs-is laid out
One egg is considered fair days worl
for hen. | hev herd of their doin,
better, but | don't want hen of min
tew do tit is apt tn hurt their consti
ton and bylaws, and thus impare thei
future worth.
The poet SEE, butifully:
''Sumbody has stole our old blew hen,
wish they'd let her bee,
She used to lay eggs day,
And Sundays she laid B."
This sounds trew enuff for poetry, bu
will bet IS thousand dollarsthat it new
er took place.
This bet stands open till the 18th da
Ov next November, at half-past - O clOR