Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1868-06-12
wise and Otherwise.

Wise and Otherwise.
Increase OF knowledge is victory
over idleness.
IA spscsise sbcrt is the ianose,h
cause II Z NV sail in Alsshndria,
Vt Skksgs sAEE,
A small town is place where
there are many tongues to, talk, but
few heads to think.
A New Haven baby weighed IL
pounds at. ia birth. and now two
months old, Meghs3i pounds.
sTke more womans waist "
shaped like an hour-glass the quick
or will the sands of her life run out.
A Boston man advertised for wife
"for a man Of means, aud received
neasly thousan& y hVtoefaphssh re-
ply.
The Bug,e says the grasshoppers
are eating up all the, ,''propipluities"
IN w v9uafI, R III Hin
A silver wedding has been celebra-
ted In Indiana, much to the astOnish-
ment of the citizens of that State of
divorce. I'll 94aEan1 br
One charge i'm a lawyers bill
against n cliant was: For waking
up I'M the night and thinking ofyour
btssincss- five dollars" E III
An exchange says the great de-
mund for microscopes Is occasioned
by the ladies desiring to use them in
finding the latest styleS of bonnets.
salisbury, the Delaware Senator,
Is described as being a man of full
habit. Which means, we suppose,
that he ,s has q habit Of always being
A man out West, who offered bail
for friend, was asked by the Judge
If he had an incumhrance on his
farm, 70, YEA" said, he, "my cid
woinaii'' sllisEllslu bsilVE
1t is proposed to take down the
sign boards Look out for the En-
gine,n on the Erie Railroad, and
substitute for thenI APrepare to meet
your God !"
There Is q boy named Foster, in
Trowbridge, Miehigesys bat nineteen
years old, wliosie seyeh etand three
inches high.
He will make q tall talker.
,Josey. being rather remiss in his
Sunday School lessons. the teacher
remarked that he hadn't very good
memory. No ma'am, said he, hes
itating, but i have hrst-rate for
gettery.' "a
Josh Billings defines 'thufrer-
bred dizziness man, as q wun that
knows enuff abont stealing soft there
kant any body steal from him, and
enuff about law so that he kin do his
stealing legallyssra AZ az4 70
A singular freak Of nature was
seen i'm an Arkansas town, recently
in the shape of man with three ears
0ne on each side Of his head, and a
.third-which belonged to another
fellow-between his teeth. taaF
,boA lover, vainly, tryine.'to explain
some scientific theory to his fair in
amorata, said: The question is diff
ficult, and don't see what can do
TO make 1t clear Suppose you pop
1t whispered the blushing damsef
John ERaAdolph swas sonce, ON q
race course, solicited to bet by O
stranger, who said:
Smith, here, will hold the stakes
lust SO, replied the descendant
OF pocnhontas, ,"but who'll hold
Robert Morris, the colored lawyer
OF Boston, practi6tA 0ai most exclu
sively In the criminal courts, and sin
gularly enough, Is q great favorits
among the Irish litigants, who rev.
erence his slnartness and have giyer
MIN a4ucrative business.
Mamma why does papa call tn,
evening" paper saH orpan1? Becaus,
papa wants to go to Congress, m,
dear. and he can't 60 without facini
s &c. mamma ssi dsiSs Ssa,sp st Co tn tS
lorgan-grinder, my child. y ga0a
fAb eastern papersays: "a story
told of jolly fellow who resided II
Chicago, about four years, and, whit
on am EASTERN visit, No 1sAed how b.
liked the water out west. BY GeosGe
HRstisa 'F,s1a tidgEt q try ! !
Answers to correspondents In silly
newspapers are answers 20 question:
written by the same person who
writes the answer, Josh, Billings, In
take-off upon this thing answers ::
Rourddea that frogs grow more bob.
tailed as they grow older Is too cuss.
ed good to be lost 1900
An accommodating editor IN Den.
yer City, hayingreceived from. a dis,
tressed lady a@fetter of inquiry on
culinary matters, thus replies:
Mrs, we have hunted the cyclic
pedias, and can find no better recipe
for cooking. cabbage, than, to nut II
into pot over the fire, and let ID
a pennsylvania paper says that at
the close of one of the recent fierce
debates in Congress, Judge Woodard
J approached Judge Schofield and said:
expectto live to see this Govern
nent fail 70 pieces" "And I, Sir,
cxpect'to live, tnI see the day when
you are an inmate Of an insane asy-
3 Twoschool testhersinI nd ianafell
out ana had fight. A great crowd
OF course was the necessary conse-
, Huence., A nervous individual came
hP ~ breathless ekcitenent and In
! qulied OF The Iwag the cause. 9VI
why" said he, "they fell out
about spelling the word bird One
said that II was byrd, and the other
contended 1t was sburd.'"
To KILL RATs.-Tle State Regis-
teysgives the following valuable re-
cipe for getting'rid of these pests:
Take a piece OF new sponge cut
Ut in small pieces, smear them with.
butter, and place them, within reach
of the rats. The divils will eat the
spongeto get tie bntler !, will become
thirsty drink water, which swellsf
the sponge, which busts the rat.
which kills him dead rs. the -6rst
man that died. Pa&nf right be-
) cufed!,S A. A--A- A.sA ~
CoLFAx AND DEBATING SOCIETIES.
Like Henry Clay, Schuyler Colfax
received his early discipline in ora.
tory in a debating club or lyceum.
j While conducting thel.rSt.f Joseph
County lind. Register he was chiefly
instrumental in keeping up a club i'm
the town, rarely was he absent from
its meetings. John ID. Defrees was
associated with him In that South
Bend club, and there was formed that
attachment between the two which