The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1868-08-21
A Little too Punctual.

The hour was approaching for the de-
parture of the New Haven steamboat from
her berth at New York, and the usual
crowd of passengers, and friends of passen-
gers, newsboys, fruil-venders, cabmen, and
dock lOafers we're assembled on and about
the boat.
We were gazing at the motley group
from the foot of the deck stairs, when our
attention was attracted by the singular ac-
ton of q tall, brown Yankee, in an i'm
mense brown hat, chocolate colored coat
and pantaloons, and fancy vest. He stood
near the starboard paddle box, and scru-
tinized sharply every female coming on
board, every now and then consulting an
enormous bulls eye watch, which he raised
from the depths of capacious fob, by
means of powerful steel chain. After
mounting guard in this manner, he dashed
furiously down the gang, plank and up the
wharf, reappearing again on board almost
instantaneously, expressing the most in
he performed several times, after which he
rushed about wildly and hopelessly eacu-
lating:
'What is the time of day? Wonder if
my repeater is fast? Whar' the boss that
owns this ship ?"
whats the matter, sir ?" when he halt
ed a moment for breath.
liant seen nothin of a gal in a blue
sun bonnet, with canton Grape shawl,
(cost fifteen dollars, pink gown and brown
boots hey? come aboard while have been
looking for the cap'n, at the hind part of
the ship-have ye, hey ?"
mo such person has come on board"
Il r..
he screamed married her yesterday All
her trunks and mine aboard, under the pile
OF baggage as tall as Connecticut steeple
The darn black niger says he won't leave
my baggage anyhow. My wife-only to
think OF Twas to have come aboard at
half past four, and here it is most FIVE !!
What's become OF her She can't have
eloped We haven't been married long
enough for that. You don't think she has
been abdicated, do ye, mister? Speak
answer-won't ye? Oh! I'm ravin dis
tlacted: What are they ringing that bell
for? Is the ship fre!'
at is the signal for departure-the first
bell; the second bell will ring in four min>
utes"
Thunder yeou don't say so! Whar' S
the cap'n 2"
THAT gentleman in the blue coat
The Yankee darted 20 the captain side
"Capn, stop the snip for ten minutes
will We ?"
Cant do it, SIR
But We must, ! tell ye I'll pay ye for
it. How much will We taxi"
81 could not do it"
"Cap'n Ill give you five dollars and
half' he kept repeating, and dancing
about in agony, like a mad jackass on a
platter
''This boat starts at FIVE, precisely" said
the captain, and turned away.
"Oh, you Sunny hearted heather I"
murmured the yankee, almost bursting in
to tears, 'partin man and wife, and we
just one day married.
At this moment the huge paddle wheels
began to paw the water, and the walking
beam descended heavily, shaking the huge
fabric to the center. all who were not GO
ing to New Haven went ashore. The
hands began to haul in the gang plank, the
fasts were already cut loose.
Lego that plank" roared the Yankee,
collaring one Of the hands. drop it like
hot potater, or III throw you into the
dock"
''Yo, no !" shouted the men in chorus,
as they heaved on tie .gangway.
Shut up, yeou brayin donkeys," yelled
the maddened Yankee, ''or therc'll be all
sorts of ugly work. +"
But the plank was got aboard, and the
boat splashed pas. the pier. In an instant
the Yankee pulled off his coat, flung his
hat beside it on the deck, crying for the
guard. $500
Are you drunk or crazy p cried pas
senger, seizing him.
II am going myself into the dock and
swim ashore cried the Yankee. II