Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-11-27

funerals is certainly suspicious circum-
stance.
Blue Beard cunningly invited the fami-
~ and their friends to the castle, where
they passed week so delightfully."- that
the youngest daughter began to think
blue was pretty good color for whlskers
after all, particularly when their possessor
could keep such al establishment as that,
where they had three meals day, besides
lunch every morning from ten o'clock
until eleven. She looked with contempt
on red-whiskered beau Of hers, she used
to think perfectly splendid" and actu-
ally asked him why he didn't Grub Indigo
into EN-" The upshot of the business
was, she consented to become Mrs. b:
Beard, and the wedding was celebrated
with great eclat.
AT the expiration of the honeymoon,
Blue Beard pretended to his wife that bust
ness OF Importance called him away to a
distant city. He would be absent for sew
eral weeks, and in the meantime she could
invite company and enjoy herself as much
as possible. He gave her bunch of keys,
enabling her at any time to open his safe,
and feast her eyes upon the diamonds Che
loaned money on collateral" some
tines, greenbacks, seven thirties, revenue
stamps and receipted gas bills deposited
there-also giving access to the wine eel
lar, store room, picture gallery, billiard
room, ten pin alley. corn house, &c, DC.
But one little key opened room in the
basement that she must not approach save
uponher peril. She promised, and he took
a street Car for the depot.
From the time that Mother Eve disre-
garded the injunction against a certain
tree in Eden's orchard and partook of a
Rhode Island pippin, thereby introducing
various things into the world never before
dreamed of, curiosity has been an absorb
ing passion with the fair sex, and we need
hardly inform the intelligent reader that
her husband was scarcelv out of sight be-
fore Mrs. B. 3. HAD unlocked the door of
the forbidden room.
But what spectacle met her affrighted
gael There, suspended on hooks like so
many gowns in clothes-press, were the
bodies of the murdered Mrs Blue Boards,
whose funerals had been indefinitely post
poned, while the floor was clothed with
their blood She would have swooned,
but the phrase wasn't known at that time.
Terribly agitated, she dropped the key on
the floor, staining it with blood, which she
was afterward unable to wash out, even
with the aid of patent wringer. ;
Blue Beard returned unexpectedly, as
everybody might have expected, and the
blood upon the key told the story of his
wifes disobedience, for blood, you know,
"will tell"
"Must l." he cried, wringing his hands
in anguish, "must again become wild
over, and SO soon? After one short
month of welded bliss drawing his
scimeter and carefully feeling its edge
must this latest and dearest one be torn
from my arms and I left alone-alone
Bo-ho-ho-o oF
"Not if 1 can helpit," remarked Mrs. B
to herself. f....-. Ia
81 never nursed a dear gazelle," Blue
Beard blubbered, as he proceeded to whet
his scythe on the stove hearth, to glad
me with its soft black eye, but when il
came to know me we'll"
"Now Blue Beard, don't want to die. "
Prepare p yelled Blue Beard, enraged
that she did not at once accept the situa-
ton.
"Since must die" said she, "grant me
6, quarter Of an hour III which to write a
farewell letter to the press"
He could not refuse so reasonable re-
quest, so he granted it, although he was
not ordinarily Grant man. Going to her
room she told her sister Anna to ascend
to the top of the tower and see if her
brothers (who, supposing Blue Beard was
away, were coming to smoke up his cigars
and drink up his whisky were yet in
sight. There was cloud of dust in the
road, but it was only flock of sheep on
their way to the State Fair.
"Time's up - shouted Blue Beard, who
didn't think much of writing letters to
newspapers, anyhow.
"Only one moment more. Anna, oh,
Anna !" she softly cried, "do you see any
body coming now?"
81 see two horsemen. They see me
wave my handkerchief 1t is-it is Sam
and Billw
Then Blue Beard rushed in with his
drawn sword Che had drGaon it gift
show, and was about to dispatch her to
the happy crOkaying grounds of her sex
when her brothers Sam and Bill dove in
and blew old Blue Boards brains out with
doubled arreled bowie knives.
The widow 3. inherited his money, to-
gether with the remains of his other wives
with which she was enabled to set up
Museum of Anatomy, finally marrying O
side Snowman. Her sister Anna was
united to a gentleman by the name OF
Dominy, becoming A,anG Dominy, though
what year this was / cannot say. Blue
Boards went out with the eminent and ex
cessive widower Of that name, and haven't
been in since to my knowledge CSncin-
natl Times.