Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1868-06-05
Sum Natral History.
BY JOSH BILLINGS.

BY JOSH BILLINGS.
The alligator is not natif of Nu En-
gland he is too useless a critter to be
born there. He belongs down South,
and resides in the same swamp that the
copperhead duz. He lives upon raw pig,
and don't hesitate to take them whole, if
there don't happen to be a smaller one
handy. He is also fond of little negro
once in while, by way of fresh bite.
What on earth they are good for, / don't
know, unless it is tew watch for pigs.
Their hides can be tanned into leather,
but they are az hard to skin az beech
tree IL; and the leather when tanned liz
about as Timber as cooking stove. But
one pair ov boots made out of alligator
will last as long as mans name duz !
The only way to wear them out is to
heave them away.
Alligator meat is not luscious. Ifyou
ask for it at frst-klass hotels they alwus
tell yu that they are just out" 1t
tastes as should think the beef NV a
mule would who had been worked forty
years in a brick yard, and then been
struck by lightning to get rid NV him.
When the alligator's mouth is wide open
the head IL just about in the center NV
his body; but they have one virtew !
came near forgetting they make very
still noise, altho they have more jaw than
any other critter I know ov.
These are some of the heaviest fakts
have been able tu gather about the ALI
gator.
The alligator seems to be seckcond
addition NV the krokadile, made out ny
what was left. / think the krokadilt
usually lays eggs when they want some
more krokadiles, but don't klo,-but
if they do, and l ever find the nest, and
the old fellow aint on the nest, / should
not hesitate to hatch out the eggs myself
with klub.
| This is all l kno at present about thu
alligator.
i THE GROW.
| Next to the monkey, the crow has thu
most deviltry to spare. They are borl
very wild, kan be tanned az easy az th'
goat kan, but a tame crow is aktuall,
worse than a sore thumb.
If there is emmy thing about the hous
that they kant get into, it IL because tn
thing aint big enuf. had rather watcl
distrikt skool than one tame crow
Crows live ON what they can steal, an
they will steal emmy thing that aint tie
down.
They are fond NV meat vittles, and al
the first to hold an inquest over a d.
parted horse or still sheep. They al
a fine bird to hunt, but hard one te'
r kill; they kan see yu miles first, an
5 will smell gun right thro the side of
t mountain. They are not songstirs, alth
they have good voice to cultivate, b.
It what they do sing they seem to unde
e stand thoroughly; long practice hi
: made them perfekt. The crow is tt
j: bird and kan stand the heat like blac
a smith and cold like stun wall. TIL,
n bid their nest among tree, and Ii
d twice, and both eggs would hatch out
" they were laid in a snow bank-ther al
lie no such thing az stopping young Gro
m Crows are very lengthy. ! Ibeleave tn
to live always. l never knu one to die
[e natral deth. They are always thin
ht flesh, and are like an old injun-rubt
Iy shew, poor inside and out.
he They are not considered fine eatir
he altho have heard somewhere NV bill
ne crow, but still never heard ov the sal
ut man hankering for some times.
al This essa on the crow is copied frt
tn natur, and if it IL true, aint to blal
is for it natur made the crow, didn
wv if had / would have made her mt
N, honest and not quite so tuff.
Sc. HENS.
nd Leads me to remark, in the fust pla
,o- that thus far they are suckcess. II
v! are domestick, and occasionally t
he This is owing to their not being bi
he enough in their younger daze; but
IN hen aint tew blame for this. Billed
as is universally respected. There is gr
ta- deal of originality tew in the hen
he actly how much kant tell, histori'
Id fight so much about it. Sum say Kn'
to er had hens with him in the ark, a
ur- some say he didn't. So it goes, VIII
her and luther.
ay, / kant tell you which was born Fl
are the hen or the egg; sometimes | tn
to the egg wuz, and sumtimes thin
dill don't kno, and kant tell now whicl