Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-06-25
THE REPUBLICAN,
tfrom ,hs Galaxy for Msyl
Nv Late Senatorial Seoretaryship,


| am not a private secretary 10 q
Senator any more, now. held the
berth two months in security and IN
great cheerinness OF spirit, but my
bread began to return frem over the
waters. then-thatis 10 say. my works
came back and revealed themselves.
Judged 1t best to resign The way
of it was ths My employer sent for
me one morning tolerably early, and,
as sooh as | had finished inserting
some eonundrums clandestinely into
his last great speech upon finance, !
entered his presence. There was
something porientious in his appear
ance. His cravat was united, his hair
was in state Of disorder, and his
countenance bore about it the signs of
a suppressed storm. He held pack
age of letters in his tense grasp, and
] knew that the dreaded Pacific mail
was in. He said
81 thought you were worthy of con
fidence."
said eyes, sir"
He said ~ gave you letter from
certain of my constituents in the State
of Nevada, asking the establishment
of post office at Baldwin's Ranch,
and told You to answer II, as ingen-
onsly as You could, with Arguments
,,I.;si, -nUuIu persuade them that there
was no real necessity for an Office at
that place"
] felt easier. "Oh, if that is all, !
did do that"
eyes, YOU did, will read your an
swer, for your own humiliation"
wAsurNorox, Nov IA, 1857.
Messrs. SMITH. JONES, aud others-Gentemen
What the mischief do you suppose you want with
apostofice at Baldwin's Ranch Il would not do
YOU any good II any letters came there you
couldn't read them, you know and besides, such
as ought TO pass through, with money in them, for
other localities, would not be kelly 10 qef through
you must perceive at once and that would make
trouble for US all No, don't bother US about
postodice in your camp. have your best interests
at heart, and feel that il would only be an orna-
menial folly. What you want is nice jail, you
'know--a nice, substantial Jail and free school.
These will make you really eontented and happy.
/ will move in the matter at once.
Very truly, etc. MARK TWAIN.
For JAMES W. NYE, U. 5. Senator
THAT is the way you answered
that letter. These people say they
will hang me if ever enter that dis
trict again and Pam perfectly salts
fed they ,0iH, too"
"Well, sir, / did not know | was do
ing any harm. | only wanted to con-
vince them"
"Ah. Well, you did convince them,
i make no matter Of doubt. Now,
here is another specimen. gaveyou
petition from certain gentlemen of
Nevada, praying that | would get a
bill through Congress incorporating
the Methodist Episcopal Church OF
the State of Nevada. ! told you to
say, in reply, that the creation of such
a law came more properly within the
province of the State Legislature
and TO endeavor TO show them that,
in The preseat feebloness Of the reli!
giOus element in that new common
wealth, the expediency of incorpora-
ting the church was questionable
What did you write p
WAsHTSGroS Nov. "a, 1907.
Rev. JoHS HALIFAX and others -Gentemen;
Z
that little speculation Of yours--Congross don't
know anything about religion. But don't you
hurry to 90 there eiiherj because this thing you
propose 10 do in that new country isn't expedicnt
in fact II is simply ridiculous Your religious
people there toofeebe in intellect in morality,
IN peiy, in everything, pretty much. You had
better drop this--you cant make Il work You
can't issue stock on a corporation like that-or II
you could, It would only keep you in trouble all
the time. The other denominations would abuse
II, and "bear" H., and "sel il Short and break Il
down. They would do with Il just as they would
with one Of your silver mines out there They
would try to make al tho world believe Il was
"wildcat" You ought TO be ashamed Of yourselves
that II what think about 1t. You close your
petition with the words "Ahd we will ever pray"
think you had boitCr---y0u need TO do II.
Very truly, etc, MARK TWAIN.
For JAMES w. NYI, L. S. Senator.
"Thdt luminous epistle finishes me
with the religious clement among my
constituents But that my political
murder might be made sure, some evil
instinct prompted me TO hand YOU
this memorial from the grave compa-
ny otelders composing the Board ofAl-
dermen of the city of San Francisco,
to try your hand upon-a memorial
praying that the city's right to the
water lots upon the city trout might
be established by law OF Congress. |
told you this was a dangerous matter
to move in. told you to write
non.committal letter to the Alder
men--an ambiguous letter-a letter
that should avoid, as far as possible,
all real considerations and discussion
OF the water-lot question If there is
any feeling left in you-any shame
surely this letter you wrote, in obe-
dience TO that order, ought TO evoke
it, when its words tall upon your
ears
WASHINGTON, Nov. q, 1887
THE HoNoRAnLE Board OF ALDERNEN--Gen-
tlemen George Washington, the reyored Father
Of his Country, is dead. His long and brilliant
career is closed, alas forever. lie was greatly re-
speeted in this section Of the country and his IN
timely disease east gloom over the whole com
TygSiiv He dieg % tAs th day ,, ef Dsssss
Of his honors and his great achievements, the most
lamented here and the best beloved that ever earth
hath helded nnto Death. At such = time as this
you speak Of water lots l--whai lot was hisl
What is fame Fame is accident. Sir Isaac
Newton discovered an apple falling to the ground
Ia trivial discovery, truly, and one which a mil
lion men had made before him-but his parents
were influential, and so they tortured that little
circumstance into something wonderful, and 10
the simple world took up the shout, and in almost
the twinking Of eve. that man was famous
Treasure these thoughts
Poesy, sweet poesy, who shall estimate what the
world 10 thee
Mary had little lamb its fleece was white as
snow
And everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was
sure 10 GO
Jack and Gill went up the hill
10 Arn.. a mil ~ ..nInr.