Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-09-04
] SeIsfted Misrellatry.
DYSPEPTIC.

II never knew his name it might have
been large, or Willum, or Jeck but he
had just stuck his hay-fork beside the
vain his horses, with dropping heads,
were nuzzling the odorous cock and the
simmer SUN made golden network in the
spinney where stood, envious, discon-
tented, and looking on. The unknown
had chosen himself a seat beneath an oak
which rose from the boundary hedge, and
from out clean calico bag he had pro-
'duted about half of halfa-quartern loaf,
and white slab of bacon, ft1afbled with
one thin, faint streak of pink lean. Ana
then he ate-ate Observation-Disclosures
off lunches of bread and Jumps of bacon.
Then there was snap and grind, and
the process was repeated, Tissue manu-
factory That man ought to have been
possessed of a reserve of tissue ready for
restoring any waste. His teeth would
have excited envy in dentist; and as to
muscle and development, he was perfect
study. --&
= But it was the mans eating which made
tfie etiviods thorough enjoyment.
He seemed to be in paradise. AS for di-
gestion, / should think he had never even
heard the word. AS for suffering, it was
plain that he knew it not, though the poor
looker-on could only groan and turn away
his head as he thought of, dinner-pills.
And how was thisg The answer Is sim
pie. The unknown never went to a
boarding school I did 60 He kept his
normal internal state lost mine
Bit ours was not d school, 1t was an es-
tablshment, where the head was princi-
pal, the second in command vice, and
the ushers masters. If the unknown had
led my life, he might not have rejoiced
6vef his bread and bacon for to the diet
at Gradus House attribute the night and
day-mare from which suffer. The living
was bad decidedly bad and how so learn
ed a iiian as OUR principal could have ex-
pected odr young stoinaths to receive un-
resentingly the solid dumplings, the hard
half.stewed steaks, and the tough mutton,
is mystery to this day. l can only ad-
vance a single theory for the piercing of
the Gloud-=ecohomf The consequences
we're headaches, dul1n6sS, stupidity, salts
and SIENNA. Those were the immediate con-
sequences, the following effects were the
HORRORS of dyspepsia. Tine unsatisfactory
nature of our meals led us to spend every
penny of our pocket money in edibles, an
extra tip received by any boy being the
sign of a following feast No school boys
could ever have been so short off for balls,
bats, and astumps, pop-guns, kites, pea
shooters, tops, or marbles, as were the
denizens of Gradus Hotise The village
toy-shop failed while the sucker business
grew into an establishment, where we in
vested our small cash in denominations
that helped to lay the soil ready for the
seeds of indigestion sown by our worthy
principal
4 bslieve that was fair sample of the
class of boys at Gfadtis House; for if. there
were instances where a young gentleman
was not quite such an ed0r reruna, | at
ttibute it to scarcity of current coin, for
they gave no credit at Creak's establish
ments Devouring was the cofrect term ;
for i remember we'll that in one week
munched peck of solid baking pears, save
one, WHICH happened to be too rotten for
my by no means squeamish taste AS to
hard and sour apples, they were always
unlimited In quantity and of all kinds,
from a little green, acid, stony pippin,
whose juice would have almost produced
carbonic acid gas from limestone, right up
through every bad variety, to hard, red,
round, Norfolk biffins, that were in their
consistency almost like wood.
We generally began in the early spring
with pasture from the fields, in the shape
of sorrel; or browsed upon the acid
leaves of the principals barberry, until
the gooseberries were large and sour
enough to take their place. As rule, we
could most of us eat a quart OF unripe
gooseberries in day, nearly pint being
devoured in bed, when the dormitories
would resound with STANCE low crunch
crunch, as if the abode of ruminants-
the monotony being broken by an occa-
sional pop. About this time, too, we
could obtain green peas--the parching
variety and beans being preserved for win
ter stores. Now it was that apples
began to be in season with us, be it
remembered, ,-of course only small and
sour. Then came pears, ripe gooseberries,
plums, all of class most worthy of con-
demnation; and lastly, there was vii
lainously, high h-priced, pithy, stony fruit,
with mousey skin, which we usedto buy
for luxury, and pretend to enjoy Mrs
Creak used to sell it to us and call it a
peach; but in flavor it was more like q
green almond With the advent of winter
of course there were oranges, figs, almonds
and raisins, and prunes; but Creak did 9
wonderful trade In what they called bra