The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1868-08-01
WIT AVID WIRDOM. .


SMALL cheer and great welcome make a
merry feast
~ you wish to get rich get married. when
was ever honey made with one bee in the
hiyeP-
FUS suggests as q companion book 10
"Every man his own lawyer" every fool
bis own Chent." 4a
Ar no nome I Of difficulty does husband
know his utter u 'plcssness, and draw ~
closely 10 bis wifc's side for comfort and 49,
sisiance, as when he wants q button sewcd
on TO his shirt collar.
STABILITY IS the great secret Of success
No man can prosper who II a mechanic one
dny, professional ulan tins next, aud noth-
ing the sKt day.
AN exchange reports very natural com
ment on ths Na-aua aeronaut's action in
throwing bottle or clarrt oYerbonrg ~
tighten the balloon Said Pat, Sand why
the divil didn't they drink itg"
A LITTLE girl in ono Of the public schooly
being asked, in the course Of her geography
lesson, xhat waterfall was, replied. that I.
was 'harr wrapped around Ter d4c's- ".
stocking"
TOE young lady who vas frozen With hor-
ror, and subsequently melted into tears, WI,
carried out, and consigned to a watrry grave
LIBRARIES have been called the madhouscs
cf the human Enind and the tombs u books
A cEETLExAN travelling through one Of
the rural precincts Of a certain county, q few
days since, rode up 70 q falm-houss, ana
thus accOsted tow headed urchin who wss
seated on the top of'a gatc-pOsL "Bab.
where's your pat The youngster replied
"Papa'a just down there behind the cswshtl
70 dig grave to bury cur old dog Towser.
The darned Old fool kiIlei hi.self barkin'
At candidates for sheriff. BE you oueg
Our frIend rode on.
Ink late Lord Eidon Lad occasioa IN dis-
charge a coachman whom he suspected Of
purloii.ing his corn. In a few days allcr, he
received letter from merchant, inqairrng
into the mans character, ma his ioFd,hip's
reply vas, that Lie was a sober and good
coaehman, bat he entertained suspicious
that he had cheated him. Tue man ca lIg
next morning 10 return thanks 70 his l0,e
ship for procuring him ~ excellent place.
My MASTER" SAID hr, was contented to
und that was sober aII gD0a cDachtaau.
but as for caeatug your icrdship he thought
the deyil himself could not 10 that.
"A YoUSG man who recently fel in love
With a beautiful young lady, says that wher
he asccrtained the other evening that sha
Teciproca ted is passion, he felt as though
lie were sitting On the roof Uf meeting
house and every shingle was JewshaFp.
WESTERN publi,her lately gave notice
that be intended to spend $50 dollars lUr tha
purpose Of getting up "a new head1 for his
paper. The next day one Of bis subscribers
d. Il
keep the money and buy new head for the
editor.'
A vERITABLE story is told Of a bright little
girl, who, attending sunday school for the
first time, was asked, "wbe went into tho
lions den ?" The child appearing puzzled,
the teacher commenced spelling, 20 awaken
the cbiId's memory. "D-a-n--' HIk know
now" exclaimed she, '-ir WAS Dan Riccn
THE man who raised = cabbage bead has
done more than NIL the metaphysics in IT,
world" said stump orator at q meeting.
''Then," replied a wag, l'yuur mother Crsbs
10 nave inc Premium 'f 4
"Look a heah, pete,r said knowing dar-
KEY, "dOn't STAN aur on DC railrOadn
''Why, Joe -
sehase III &c cars see that mouf Or vourn
open, dey viii tink il am de depot and run
Ilte into it,.
SoEE one blamed DR.. Marsh for changing
bis mind "Wcli," said be, "rhat i the
difference between man and jackass--the
jackass can't change bis mind, and a man
can-ips human privilege"
"We're in pickle nov" said a man in a
crowd. "a regular JAM" said another.
"HeaA preserve Us" mourned the old
lady.
1t costs us more to be miserable than
would make ~ perfectly happy; how cheap
and easy is the service OF virtue, and how
dear do we pay for our vices.