davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1868-10-07

fashionable women spend ten hours on
their heads where they spend one on their
brains. The result is fine flow of hair,
but not of ideas.
Quilp, who has heretofore been a Uni
versalist, now believes that there are two
thiags destined to be eternally lost-his
umbrella and the man who stole it.
"Joe, my DEAR" said fond wife to her
husband, who was railroad engineer
"do fix up little, you look SO slovenly.
Only think, what an awful memory it
would be for me il you should get blowed
up looking so.'
The young lady who speedily sang 81
wish somebody would come p has been
gratified. Eleven city cousins have come
up on visit-intesding to stay all sum
mer.
Said an Irish justice to an obstreperous
prisoner on trial, "We want nothing from
you but silence, and id little of that.
A strain in the ear is more agreeable
than one in the back.
He is good shoemaker who is faithful
to the last.
Fashionable dresses are short-so are
fashionable husbands who pay for them.
A classic invalid, upon being asked if
ne were i'll, promptly replied, sic sum.
~O~
When you 20 fishingr be sure and take
bite" before you start, for you may
not get one after.
A confectioner advertises broken hearts
for thirteen cents q pound.
Many young lady that puts on airs
CHANCES her manner somewhat when heirs
are put on her.
Another terrible squall in the British
Channel-the Princess of Wales has
another baby.
Farmers are like fowls, neither will get |
full crops without industry.
Something always on hand-your
humh
The man who swallowed the story whole
VAS nearly suffocatad-
North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1868-10-07

0UVy Try 0OOUS & ~ OIl00Ss
n ETH, WOOD & CO., Importers & Jobbers of
N Fancy Dry Goods, Notions. Hosiery White Goods
WOODEN Goods, complete stock, lowest prices. 81
and CO Michigan Ave.
MANNING BROS, WEST & CO., Wholesale deal.
w ers in Notions. Hoop Skirts, Hosiery Gloves
and Fancy Dry Goods, II Lake Street. Our stock
entirely new.
NEYAOUR, CARTER & CO.. Importers & Jobbers
in White Goods. Linens, Hosiery, Gloves Notions
Trimmings, Corsets, % Lake Street
The New York herald., 1868-04-10

responsible party, will be leased favorable terms
Also,
Al Blooming gdaie, Broadway and Ninetysth street the
furnished House, with grounds adjoining, stable &C. known
the residence OF the late Dr. Valentine Mott Apulv 10
JOHN A. VAN BUskIRR, Is Fourth avenue. corner Of
Tenth street.
, 1868-01-03
sWalIa &alla Statestman.
FRIDAY EVENING, january 3, 1866.

TEN FoLLIEs.-To think the more man
eats the fatter and stronger he will become.
To think the more hours children study
in school the faster they learn.
To imagine every hour taken from sleep
is an hour gained.
To act on the presumption that the small
est room is large enough to sleep in.
To eat without an appetite, or continue
to eat after it has been satisfied, merely to
crafty the taste.
To conclude that if exercise is good for
the health, the more violent and exhaustive
it is, the more good is done.
To commit an act which is felt in itself to
be prejudicial, hoping that somehow or other
it may be done in your case with perfect
impunity,
To argue that whatever remedy causes one
to feel Immediately better, is ''good for the
SYSTEM" without regard to more ulteriOr
effects.
To advise another to take remedy which
you have not tried yourself, without making
special inquiry whether all the conditions
are alike.
To eat hearty supper for the pleasure ex-
perienced during the brief time it is passing
down the throat, at the expense of a whole
night of disturbed sleep, and weary waking
in the morning.
, 1868-01-03
Notice to Absent Defendent.
On WASHINGTON.

TERRITORY OF WASHINGTON. ! &C
COUNTY OF WALLA WALLA.l 90
In the District Court, First Judicial District,
in and for said County and Territory
THOMAS X. Mccoy ard GEORGE ROOT rs
GEORGE W. BAILEY.
TITO GEORGE W, BAILEY, DEPENDENT IN the
4 above entitled action: You are hereby notified
that THOMAS X. Mccoy, and GEORGE ROOT,
Plaintiffs in this action, have filed a complaint
against you in said Court, which shall come on TO
commence more than two months after the 22d day
of November. 1867, and unless you appear at said
term and answer, the same will be taken confess
ed and She prayer thereof granted. The object and
prayer Of said complaint is to recover Judgment
against you for the sum of three hundred a I'd fifty
five and sS-l00 collars, with interest thereon, the
same Icing the amount due On accOun. of Thrashing
and labor performed. Complaint filed Oct. 3lst,
1867. Mccoy e ROOT, by GEO. ROOT.
II. PARKER, Atty for plaintiffs. 49-2m
, 1868-01-03

DR. JULIEN PERRAULT, Doctor of Medicine Of
~ the Faculty Of Paris. Graduate Of the Universe
ty Queens College, and Physician Of tho ST. Johh
Bartste Society of San Francisco.
DIR. PERRAULT has pleasure to inform patients ana
others seeking confidential medical advice, that hG
can be consulted daily at his Office, ArmoTy nan
building, Northeast corner Montgomery and SaciS-
mento streets, San Francisco. Rooms No. O. 10, II,
first hoor, up stairs, entrance either Montgomery
or Sacramento streets.
DR. PApgAuIT's studies have been almost excu
sively devoted to the cure Of the various forms o
Nervous and Physical Debility, the results Of iniuu-
Gus habits acquired in youth, which usually termin
ate in impotence and sterility and permanently in
duce all the concomitants Of old age. Where secret
intrmity exists involving the happiness of lite and
that OF Others reason and morality dictate the ne
cessity Of IFS removal, for il is fact that premature
decline OF the vigor Of mannood, matrimonial IN,
happiness, compulsory single life, etc, have ther
sources in causes the germ of which is planted IN
early life, and the bitter fruit tasted long atterWara
patients aboring under this complaint will conn lalh
Oi one or moro Of the following symptoms NOG
turnal Emissions, Pains in the Back ana Heau
Weakness Of Memory aiil Sight, Discharge from the
Urethra on going to stool or making water, the In
tellectual Faculties weakened, Loss OF Memory
ensues, Ideas clouded, and there is dislnchna
tion to attend TO business, or even reading, WriIS
or the society of friends, etc The patient Will ploo
ably complain of Dizziness, Vertigo, and the sigS
and hearing are weakened and sleep disturbed py
dreams melancholy, signing, papitations, falnungs,
coughs and slow fever; while some have external
rheumatic pain, and nImbneSs Of the body. some
of the most common symptoms are pimples IN INC
face and aching in different parts of the body' Ia
tients suffering from this disease should apply i'm
mediately to DR. PERRAULT, either in person or y
letter. as he will guarantee cure Of Seminal EHis'
sions and Impotence in six to eight weeks -
Patients suffering from venereal diseases in any
stage, GOnorrhoca, elect Structures, Bubo Ulceis'
Cutaneous Eruptons etc. will be treated successful
iy. All Syphilitic and Mercural taints entirely re
moved from the system.
Dr.. PEERAULT's diplomas are in his office, Whele
patients for themselves that they are uuL.i
the care of regularly educated practitioner ID0
best references given if required. -,
Patients suffering under chronic diseases can c4ii
and examine for themselves. We invite lnvesuga
ton; claim not to know rything, nor TO eur9 e
erybOdy, but do claim that in all cases taken uu
der treatment we fulfill our promises We psrueu
larly request those who have tried this boasted u
tor, and that advertised physician till worn out anu
discouraged, TO call upon us.
Low charges and quick cures. IA.
Ladies suffering with any complaint ineidenlSI "
their sex, can consult the doctor with the assnra'
of relief
, 1868-01-03
To Females.

When q female is in trouble, or afflicted with A..
ease, weakness in the back and limbs main in ~
head, dimness of sight, loss of muscular power r t
pita;lon af the heart, irritability, Nervousness, p
treme urinary difficulties, arrangement of dicss,;1.
the womb hysteria sterlity and ali Other iso ~
peculiar to females, they should 90 or wre al oTes
to the celebrated female doctor, W. K DOHERTY ~
his Medical Institute, and consult him abopt tbo3s
troubles and disease. The Doctor is eiiecting mora
cures than any other physician in the State Of Cs
forna. Let no false dclicacy prevent Won bnt sn,Jv
Immediately and save yourself from painful sngerr
ings and premature death. All married ladies VIZ,
delicate health or other circumstances prevent an
increase in their families, should write or can =,
DIX. W. X. DOHERTY'S Medical Institute. and ,b'"
will receive every possible relief and help. Tls
Doctors offices are arranged that lie can lie con-
suited without fear of observation
, 1868-01-03
Shcrin's sale.
TERRITORY OF WASHINGTON, CO
Cor-Nry oF WATIA pS'

TERRITORY OF WASHINGTON, &C
CoUNTY OF WALLA. "''
DY VIRTUE OF AN EXECUTION ISSUED
ID out Of the District Courl, First Junicial Dis
trlct, w T., and to me directed, in favor of SAM
UEL LINKTON, and against W. J. TERRY, | am
commanded to sell all the right title and interest Of
said W. j. TERRY, to the following described real
property, to-wit: Lot No. in block No. T. fronting
80 feet Rose street. by 20 feet in depth, in the
city of Walla Waa and the building erect ed there
on to satisfy sad execution and cost Notice is here
by given that will sell the above described real
property to the highest bidder, for cash. lawful mon
ey of the U. g.. on WEDNESDAY, The 18TH DAY
OF JANUARY, 1865, at the hour of O'Clock, P N.
Sale to take place on the premises.
A. SElTEL, Sheriff w. W. Co, W. T.
Dec. 27, 1867. t24wl By A. J. GREGORY Dept.
, 1868-01-03
Female Monthly Pills.

De. PERRAULT is the only agent in Cslifornls lo'
Dr. BIoT's Female Monthly Pills. Their immense
sale has established their reputation female rem
edy, unaPproached and far in advance OF every o.o
er remedy for suppressions and Irregularities, ~
other distractions in females On the receipt O ~ =,
dollars, these Pills will be sent by mail or -
any part Of the world, from curiosity OF uA
age.
Persons at distance can be cured at home, BY So
dressing letter to DR.. PERRAULT. corner OF os'i
mento and Montgomery streets, Rooms 10 and u, "
Box 973, p. o. San Francisco, stating the e@se e,
infinitely as possible general habits Of living, oee'
patton, etc., etc.
All communications confidential .,
July 7, 1866. 2Sy
, 1868-01-03
NOTICE

TNO JOHN W. MILES: I shall apply to the Van
il coucouver Land Office, on the 9th day of No
vember next, TO enter the n 4 Of N w 4 ana N W
4 of L u of section SO, and S w 4 of f x
of section % of Tow ship s. N 81 east, and on
the 22d of November next. at 2 O'Clock. P NJ,
shall take depositions of witnesses before H. Parker,
Notary Public, at his Office, in tho City of Walla
Walla, w. 4. Said depositions to be submitted to
the Register and Receiver OF the aforesaid Land Of
fee, on the day of trial, to show that you have
abandoned said Land over six months at one time,
and thus forfeited your right under the Homestead
Act OF May goth, 1862, TO said land.
LEVI W. MAUZEY.
WaIla WaIla Oct. 18TH 1867. 44GW
, 1868-01-03
To CorIespOndents.

Patents resi1ing in any part OF the State, horcv
er distant, who may desire the opinion and adyics ~
DIR. IOHERTY on their respective cases, and via
think proper to submit written statement of sncb
in preference t0fToSdiug a porsoual interview sIs
respectfully 7uSsured that their communications will
be held most sacred. DIR. Doh ERTY takes this On
portuuity OF Observing, that all letters are oply
opened and replied to by himself and the latter -
soon possible. Ifthe case be fully and csndidiy
dercriled, personal communication will be uonee,;
Sry, AS instructions for diet, regimen and the cen
eIal treatment the case itself nclnding the rene
diesl will be forwarded without delay, and in such
manner as to convey no idea OF the purport Of N.
letter or parcel so Transmitted,
, 1868-01-03
To the Afflicted.

DR.. W. X. DOHERTY returns hi. ,;r,..,
TO ms numerous patients for their patronars" "AnkI
would take this opportunity to remind tbem y, and
continues to consult at his Institute for the cDts @ h:
gestive and Genito- Urinary Organs ana IN Di-
diseases, viz: Syphilis in all its forms and private
Seminal Weakness ard all the horrid consoog s'ages
of selfabuse. GoLorrhoea, elect, Strictpre Sce' Sence'
nal and d Durnai Emissions Sexual Debility Bisssas
OF the Back and Loins, Inflammation of t6e PIseSses PIes
and Kidneys. etc, etc.; and he hopes thai hi.
experience and successful practice will cont;nn.
insure him share of public patronage 'i5us Ps u %
practice of many years in Europe and the Inns ,nS
SlStes' ne Is enabled to apply the most efficient up5
uses no mercury, charges moderate. treats NJ. ne
uents in correct and honorable way and ba. pa
ences OF unquestonabley yeracity from men Of ta
respectabny and high standing in society. All nav,
ties consulting him by letter OF otherwise viii =,
ceive the best and gentest treatment and imnrCi, %
secrecy. -'p''i'
, 1868-01-03
SpeTmattorThRa.

DIR. pOHERTY has just published an important
pamphlet, embodylng his own views and experiences
in relation TO Impotence or Viriity, being short
Treatise on Spermattorhoea Seminal Weakness
Nervous and Physical debility consequent on this
affection, and other diseases of the sexual organs
This little w5tk contains information OF the utmost
value 70 all, whether married single and will be
sent FREE by mail on receipt of Six Cents in post
e stamps for return postage.
c5S-G -Gorsnltatinns by iottor r otlterwi-e-F FREE
Permanent cure guaranteed or no pay. Address,
W. X. DOHERTY, NJ D.
IS ly San Francisco, Cal.
, 1868-01-03

THE PENNSYLVANIA Good Templars
have "resolved' that none of their number
will engage themselves to "young men who
indulge in the poisonous glass, and who do
not advocate the temperance cause?" Now,
then, young gentlemen, take your choice
wine or women.
, 1868-01-03
MAJOR LANES INDIAN IMMINENT,
AND TAKE NO OTHER

Price Fifty Cents per Bottle. For sale at whole
sale and retail by HUDSON 6 MCCARTHY,
IA Merchants Exchange, San Francisco, Cal,
General Agents for the Pacific Coast,
And by respectable druggists throughout the world.
countersgned by ]. T. Lane & Co., Proprietors, l53
Broadway, New York.
Rs-Send for a circular. 5O-3m
, 1868-01-03

A precociOus specimen of Young America
got lost at country fair in New Jersey, and
went bawlins around, much to the annoyance
of some quiet people, who inquired the case
of his grief. He answered, with suppressed
sobs, Il want my nanny; that's what's the
matter. l told the darned thing she'd lose
me-
, 1868-01-03

THE Alexandria (La.) Democrat relates the
following Among the many noticeable inciS
dents of the late election farce, we were an eyer
witness to the following: An old and faithful
servant of one of our oldest citizens had just been
ushered out of the back door Of the voting room
in the Town Hall, when he was accosted in the
street py his boss, and asked the question :
"Well, Peter, have you voted p Old Peter look
ed up wisely aud remarked, "No," fore God !
Master Joe, they took my ticket from me and
put it in a candle box, and wouldn't let me vote.
, 1868-01-03
SUMMONS.

TERRITORY OF WASHINGTON,
COUNTY OF STEVENS hS.
In Justices Court, Stevens County, W. r.. NJ
OPPeHheiRier Justice.
HUDSON BAY CO.. Plaintiff %. JAMES MIKE.
VOR, Defendant.
ITO JAMES MeKEVOR; You are hereby notis.d
Il that the HUDSON BAY CO. has dlcd . 49,
plant against you in said Court which will coma an
% he heard on the 18th day Of December. a n
1857 at 10 clock, A. n, two months from the dats
OF this nouce, and unless you appear At said tero
and answer the sane will be taken as confessed and
tSe N prayer thereof granted The object aud prayer
drsd dollars for goods purchased nv YOU.
Complaint fled October 18th 1857.
ostober 18th, 1857 H.an
, 1868-01-03

THE Golden Era remarks that this is an
admirable country for the accumulation Of
debt. The Federal Government leads the
way to an unknown number of millions;
thirty.six States follow with an aggregate OF
seven hundred millions; then comes the
counties, with full liberty to incur liabilities;
after them cities and towns; lastly, iDdivid'
uals.
, 1868-01-03

WHO married a negro woman, and by her
had mulatto children? Richard NJ. john
son-Rad. paper.
Who has lived in open adultery for thirty
years with niger wench? Thaddeus Ste
vens, the owner of the Radical party.-Dem.
paper.
, 1868-01-03

A cynical old bachelor, who firmly believes
that all women have something to say on
all subjects, recently asked a female friend:
well, madam, what do you hold on the ques-
tion of female sufrage?' To him the lady
responded calmly: 'Sr, hold my tOngucl
, 1868-01-03
DiVOrce NOtice.

Divorce Notice.
TERRITORY OF wAsHINGTON.l
County of Walla Walla. b
ELLEN TERRY, Plaintiff. 70. WIN. j. TERRY. De.
fendant.
In the District Court, FIRST Judicial District.
TTN0 WIN. ]. TERRY: You are hereby notified that
Il ELLEN TERRY has filed a complaint against
you in said Court which will come on 10 be heard at
the first term Of the court, which shall Commence
more than :wo months after the llth day Of October
1861; and unless you appear and answer the same
will be taken as confessed. and the prayer thereof
granted. The object and prayer OF said Complaint IL
the diss oluon of the bonds Of matrimony existing
between Plaintiff and Defendant, and the disposito5
OF the two children Of Plaintiff and Defendant And
you are further notified that the Plaintiff will snnlv
TO the Hon. J. E. Wyche Judge Of the District for
the relief prayed for in said complaint aer the az
praton OF thirty days afer the llth day Of Decem-
43-2m. H. LASATER. Atty for Plaintiff.
, 1868-01-03

Ipressed her gentle form to me and whisp>
cred in her ear, if when was far, far away
she'd drop for me a tearY paused for some
cheering words, my throbbing heart to cool,
and with her rosy lips she said, 'Oh Ike,
you're such fool
, 1868-01-03

Luck lies in bed, and wishes the postmar
would bring him news of legacy. Labor
turns out at six o'clock, and with busy per
or ringing hammer lays the foundation Of 4
competency.
, 1868-01-03

IowA.-An Iowa paper states that the
Democratic gain in that State is about 49,
900, and rightfully claims that in proper
ton to voting population, it is larger than
the gain in either Ohio or Pennsylvania.
, 1868-01-03

A lady who has great horror of tobacco
got into the New Haven cars the other day,
. and inquired of the masculine occupant:
DO you chew tobucco?
NO, ma'sm, l don't was the reply, but
can get you a chaw.'
, 1868-01-03
PIONEER BRIDGE,


HNHE PROPRlETORS of the above named Bridge
desire to inform the travelling public, and old
patronizers especially that being thankful for past
patronage they will endeavor to merit continuance
of the same.
The will cross STOCK, TEAMS, &C., CHEAPER
than any other Bridge or Ferry on the River.
They will also keep on hand good assortment of
GROCERIES, PROVISIONS, &c. The BAR will
sEGARS, &c. &c. Also, Sherry Cobbers and Iced
Drinks, in season, and every thing connected with
first class house.
Is Gm TIM. LEE & co.
, 1868-01-03

Why are lovers hearts like the sealser-
pent? Because its a secreter of great slghs.
(sea creature of great size).
, 1868-01-03

Ex>President Pierce offers S5 900 to help
the democratic conquest of New Hampshire,
next spring.
, 1868-01-03

A Broadway jeweler exhibits a diamond
cross which required the work of forty years
in its construction.
, 1868-01-03

WHY Is prosy preacher like the middle
OF wheely Because the fellows aroup a
him are tired.
, 1868-01-03
PERRY DAVIS
VEGETABLE PAIN-KILLER

THE PAIN KILLER is
l. equally applicable and ecaciOus to young or old
TNHE PAIN KILLER
i is both an Internal and External Remedy.
TINHE PAIN KELLER should be
l. used at the first manifestation of Cold or Cough.
TINE PAIN KILLER
i Don't fail to keep it in the house ready for use
VNHE PAIN KILLER
Il Is good for sprains and Bruises. Try it.
TNHE PAIN KILLER
l. cures the Toothache.
TUE PAIN KILLER
L Is favorte with all classes
THE PAIN KILLER
i Will cure Chilblans.
THE PAIN KILLER
l. VIII cure Cholera Morbus.
TUE PAIN KILLER
l. viii cure Dyspepsia.
VIHE PAIN KILLER
i Is the Great Family Medicine of the age.
TINE PAIN KILLER
Il Can be bought of your Druggist or Grocer
VNHE PAIN KILLER
Il Will euro Painters Collie.
| TNHE PAIN KILLER
| Il Is good for Scalds and Burns.
| TIME PAIN KILLER
Il Has the Verdict Of the People its favor.
| TTNHE PAIN KILLER
Il Gives Universal Satisfaction.
| TTNHE PAIN KILLER
Il Beware Of LIMITATIONS and CoUNTERFEIrs.
TTNHE PAIN KILLER
Il Is almcst certain cure for CHOLERA and has
without doubt, been more successful in curing this
terrible disease, tlan any other known remedy, or
even the most Eminent Skilfu Physicians In
India, Africa, and China, where this dreadful disease
is ever more or less prevalent, the PAIN KILLER is
considered, by the natives well European resi-
dents in those climates, SURE REMEDY.
| TNHE PAIN KTLLER-each Bottle
| Il is wrapped with full directions for its use.
| THE PAIN KILLER is sold by all
l. Druggists and Dealers in Family Medicines.
, 1868-01-03

III all the world we're blind, what A melan
enoliy sight 1t would be- said an Irish clergy
man. sJ
, 1868-01-03

-. ne smallest watch at the Paris Erro.;
uoIa olon was 50 diminutive that it was set ' r.
, 1868-01-03

my boy" said distinguished merob,D,
70 MS son, who meditated matrimonv ~
sure in making your selection, to pet boIS
Vi piece OF fgoods that will wash
, 1868-01-03

The brave man tries his sword, tho COW.
ard bis tongue; the old cOquettc, her gold;
, 1868-01-03

1T must Be pleasant for Thad. Steven, :,
Know, Know that the Washington papers have h;
, 1868-01-03

NEVER be without quarter in your pock.
ct, and you will always be a quarter-m master
, 1868-01-03

Tho INDIAN LINIMENT, as rolief eve, ready,
as A killer of pain, taken nwardly or applied out
wardlv applied has no equal. For the reliet and
cure sof Rheumatic and Neuralgia Affections, Sprains
Bruises, etc. it is unequaed. 1t is also most eiea
ciou taken inwardly in the cure OF Cholera,
Cramps, and Pains in the Stomach, Diarrhoea, Dys
entery, Cholera Morbus, Cholera IuAntum, ETC.,
etc, aud is without exception the Most Wonderful
Panaeea the World affords. No family should he
without it. Every traveller by land Cr sea, should
have bottle. Miners and Farmers residing at a
distance from physicians should keep it constantly
on hand In of faccidents and sudden attacks Of
stomach complaints its value cannot be estimated.
Ennnirn for
, 1868-01-03
The Richest Man in the World!
TXTRACT OF A LETTER FROM BARUN Sui
~ ONION ROTHCHILD.

Paris, sthApril, 1854, 25 Rue Family, st. Honore.
Will you be kind enough to have forwarded 70 me p,
hera 200 bottles of your Indian Liniment yel WI
send AT the same time the account, / wilt forward
you the amount through Messrs Belmont q Co.. New
York.
Baron Solomon Rotehild having recommended 70
many of his friends Major Lanes Lniment, and
thew being desirouS to procure it, he should advise
HIM to establish depot in Paris
, 1868-01-03

1T Is supposed that the man who leie the
house wasn't able to take it with him.