The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1868-02-01
1Mtteuanr.
Mark Twals's Ealogy OF the Fair
Ii ReV.

r
The Wsshingt,n Correspondents Club held
= anniversary az Saturday night, January 18th.
Mr.. Clemens, bs ter known as MARX Twain,
responded 70 the toast, "Woman, the pride of
Ne professions and the jewel Of ours" He
txid:
N. Rsadsns: I do not know Why / should
have bsea singled ont to receive the greatest dis
enstioa of The svsninS-for % the once Of re-
plying b the toast 70 woman has been regarded
n every sgs. slApplaass.] I Do not knew why
1 have received thia distilction, unlsp Il y that
! am ttiAe los hemely than the other Inesnbers
ef the club. But, be this as IL may, Mr.. Presi.
hsnt. an proud q the position, aAdayou' could
not have chosen any one who would have accept
ed Il more gladly, or lsbored with heartier
good win to do the subject justice than I. Be
cauas, sir, love the sex. Laughter.j love
az the women, air, irrespective Of age or color.
lLAughtsr.] ~. ~ ioa
II Human intelligence cannot estimate what'we
owe TO woman, sir. She sews on our buttons
llsughterl she ropes US in at the church fairs
she Oonfdes in US she tells us Whatever she can
ind cut about the little private affairs of the
lneighbors-she gives US good advice, and plenty
OF it-she gives piece of her mind, sometimes
and sometimes all of it she soothes our aching
hrows-shc bears our children. In all relations
Of life sir, it is but just and graceful tribute
TO woman to say of her that she il a brica.
(Great laughter. .-~,
/ Whsrssoever you place woman, sir--in
whatsoever position or estate-she IL an orna-
nent T. the place she occupies and Q treasure to
the whole world. Here Mr.. Twain paused,
looked inquiringly u: his hearers, and remarked
that the applause should come in 1t this point;
It came in. Mr.. Twain resumed his eulogy !
Look at the noble names Of history! Look at
! Cleopatra look at Dssdcmoas look ut Flor.
saoe Nightingale! look at Joan Of Arc look at
Lucretia Borgia [Disapprobation expressed
"Well,' said Mr.. Twain, scratching his head
ioubtfully, suppose We let Luoretia slide +
Lock at Joyce Heth look at Mother Eve re.
peat sir, look at the illustrious names of histo-
~! Look at the Widow Machres Look at Lucy
Stone! look at George Francis Train [Great
laughter. And sir, l say, with bowed head and
deepest veneration, look at the mother of WASH
ington! She raised boy that could not lie
could notGe. Applauss Bat he never had any
chance. It might have been different with him
II he had belonged to newspaper oorrespon.
dents club. Laughter, grosns Misses, cries of
"put him ous."l Mark looked around placidly
upol his excited audience and resumed.
1 repeat, sir, that in whatsoever position you
place aiwoman, che isan ornament to society and
treasure 10 the world. As sweetheart she
has few equals and no superio~ ;-llaus hterE
se1s cousin she~y il convenient; - . wealthy
grandmother, with an insarabls distsmper, she
10 precious; a. q wet nurse she has no equal
among meni LAughtsr.] afIP NT
What, sir, would the people of this earth be
without womanp They would be scarce, sir.
Then lot us cherish her-let IA protect her-let
- give her our support, our encouragement, our
sympsthy-oursslsslves il we get chance
fLaughter.l ses y s1sl.as4 esfes ~
But jestiag aside. Mr.. President. woman is
levsbls, gracious, kind Of heart, beautiful, wor.
they OF all respect, of al sstssm, Of all defer.
snos. Net any here will refuse to drink her
health right eoriislly, for Ssch srd evssy one Ut
" has personally known, and loved. and honor.
ID, the very best one Of them all-his own moth.
"! (Applause.l go,