davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
rhe FORTUNES or an .fboIifio,.isf.

One John G.. Underwood, a New
Yorker of New England descent
went, n few years since, as an adven-
turer and school teacher to Virginia,
where, marrying a lady who owned
some land, he settled down as Vir-
ginian citizen. But being school
teacher and Yankee besides, of course
he knew a great deal more than his
neighbors, and undertook to teach
them how much better ii would be to
abolish their control and guidance
over their'negroes, and to 20 down,
or strive TO got down, to common
level with darkcydom But they not
only refused to Listen to his anti-social
and absurd teachings, but gave the
beast notice that he must abandon his
incendidry notions or leave The State,
and, the frightened creature ran OIL,
and of course turned up as martyr
among the Abolition lnnatics at the
North Finally, Abe Lincoln, the
great embodiment of Mongrelism, was
elected President, and he appointed
Underwood District Judge for the
State Of Virginia, though how he
came by his law, unless, like Dog
berry, reading and writing, it came
by nature, we have never heard. The
estate" of Virginia, after flourishing
a while at Wheeling, set itself up at
Alexandria, elected a Governor and
Legislature, with bran new Consti-
tuition, which carried out Underwood's
notions and abolished the white su-
premacy over the negroes, and better
still, elected Underwood one of the
Senators of Reformed" Virginia.
But he did not resign his Judgeship-
on the contrary, appointing his son
Marshal of his own Court, and seizing
certain estates Of "rebels,v he confis-
Gated them of course, and with his
sons help bought them, and, it is said,
now owns, or claims TO own. some of
the best landed property in Virginia.
Meanwhile, IL became necessary that
the Abolition Mongrel party should
take "advanced" ground and deny
that there was any State of Virginia,
at all events, not until a convention
was held and Mongrclism embodied
in new Constitution Again Under
wood appears, and of course presides
over the niggers, white and black,
now assembled in the Capital of Yir-
ginia, and all this time not only re-
ceivos his pay ms u $, Judge, but
franks his letters as a U. S. Senator,
and of course draws his pay as the
President of the Mongrel Convention.
But one thing more seems needed to
round off the fullness and perfection
of the national and beastial lunaey of
the day, and this man, Underwood
strangely but fitly meets this want
he also presides over the trial of JEFF
ferson Davis for treason
Such are the fortunes of an Aboli-
tionist-a man who represents Mon
grelism, the degradation Of the great
master race to legal level with the
lowest, the contaminated, woolly-
headed, long-heeled negro, and embod-
les a sin against God and crime
against humanity so hideous and ac-
cursed, that nature herself revolts, and
the polluted beasts perish in their own
rottenness, as the census returns show
us = Dan B00k
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
a Fashionable LADY,.

Mark Twain attended one of the
Grant fashionable receptions in Wash
ington. OF one Of the toilettes pre-
pared for the occasion, he says
AtGrants reception the other night,
the most fashionably dressed lady
was Mrs. g. c. She wore pink satin
dress, plain in front, but With a good
deal oirako Otto the train | mean !;
il was said to be two or three yards
long. One could see it creeping along
the floor some time after the woman
was gone.
Mrs. G. wore also white bodice,
cut bias, with Pompadour sleeves,
ilounced with ruches; low neck, with
the inside handkerchief not visible /;
white kid gloves. She had on pearl
necklace, which glinted lonely high
up in that barren waste Of neck and
shoulders. Her hair was frizzled into
tangled chapparel, forward of her
ears aft IL was drawn together and
compactly bound and plated into a
stern like a pony's tail, and further
more was canted upward at n sharp
angle, and ingeniously supported by
a red velvet crupper, whose forward
extremity was made fast with a half
hitch around hair pin on her poop
deck, which means, Of course, on the
top of her head, if you do not under.
stand fashionable technicalitics. Her
whole top hammer was neat and be-
coming.
She had a beautiful complexion
when she first came in, but Il faded
out by degrees in the most unaccount-
able way. However IL was not lost
for good. ! had found the most of it
on my shoulders Afterwards had
been standing by the door when she
had been squeezing in and out with
the throng. There were other fash.
ionably dressed ladies present, of
course, hut ! only took notes of one,
as a specimen.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

+.
When General Superintendent Ken
nedy reported the terrifying fact that
five cases of nitro -glycerine were
missing from New York, and that it
was feared chat they had been sent to
Washington to demolish the Capital,
people generally were disposed TO re.
gard it as capital joke but the
Springfield Register, Of Illinois, re-
ceived variety OF telegrams from the
doomed city, which we subjoin, and
which shows that it was more seri-
Gus matter than any had supposed.
The following aretho kilograms
WAsHINGToS, Fcb2e, lOAsAl. --Ihe
packages which were supposed to con-
tain nitro glycorino liaye been opened,
and found, to be flieasNiths piekled
cabbage. E--
1910 A. M.-Senator Yates has
made an affidavit that there is moth
ing dangerous to Congress in picked
cabbage, He has frequently carried
large quantities into the Senate cham
ber.
--l0:15A. A.M-A special committed
has been appointed 70 inquire into the
probability of Member of Congress be.
ing blown up by their constituents.
Thad. Stevens testifes that he has
been frequently blown up by his mn-
latto houso-keeper, and that it never
hurt him.
Gen Butler was requested to ap-
pear and testify as to the effect Of the
explosion Of the powder ship at Fort
Fisher, but refuses TO attend,
1920 A. M.-Gen. Grant request 9
that any nitro -glycerine arriving in
the city be bottled up and sent TO his
headquarters He says that he will
put it whore nobody will ever SEQ it.
1925 A. MA respectable looking
man has been arrested. He was ear
rying can containing quart ofcoal
oil. He was taken before Judge Car.
ter and ordered to give $500, 900 bail
1880 A. MA boy has just been
arrested for offering to sell matches
on the steps of the capitol. The an.
rest was affected at the instance of
Mr.. Cullom, Of Illinois.
1895 A NJ -SenatorY ates has arrived
at Willards bar.room. He says The
whole capitol building was blowninto
fragments about five minutes since.
He is entirely divested OF clothing,
with an Insignificant exception.
l0:4O A. MIR. Trumbull suggest
that nitro-glyeerine might be used
with effect in removing Johnson, the
traitor, from the Presidential office,
and thus save the expense of the pro
cess Of impeachment. Mr.. Trumbull
is strongly in favor of an economical
administration.
l0;45 A MA tram of cars, which
is supposed to be loaded with nitro
has been halted about four
miles from city.
1850 A. M.-Thc train has been al.
lowed to proceed, at the request of
John A Logan, who states that it con.
tains whisky belonging to loyal men,
who are shipping it to smyrna.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
Clpthina.
HOW TO SAVE MONEY.

VNHE times are hard you'd like 10 know
Il How you may save your dollars
The way TO do II will show,
III you will read what follows.
A man who lived not far from here,
Who worked hard at bis trade,
But bad a household to support
That squandered all be made.
met him once. Says be, "My friend,
look thread bear and rough
I've tried to get myself suit,
But can't save up enough"
Says I, my friend. how much have yOui
III tell you where TO 60
To get suit lhnfs sound aud cheap:
To REIZENSTEIN 4 Co.
He took what little he had saved,
And went to Reizensiein Brolhsrs,
And there be got handsome suit
For half he paid to others.
Nov he is home, be looks 90 well eosT
Aud their effect il such,
That when they take heir daily meal,
They don't eat half as much.
And now be 6ndf on Saturday night,
With oil their wants supplied,
That he has money left to spend, f
And some to lay aside.
His good success. with cheerful smile,
lie gladly tells to all.
II you'd save money, 90 and buy
Your clothes at
RRIZENsTEIN's CLOTHING HALL.
Whore the cheapest. finest and best Clothing
and good Furpishins Goods can he had to snif
every taste and In every style aprll,'e7
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

A rich man made his will, leaving
all he had to a company of his fellow.
citizens to be disposed of, but reserv-
ing to his right heir "such portion
as pleaseth them" The heir having
sued the company for his share of tho
property, the judge inquired whether
they wished TO carry out the will of
the tostator, and if so, whatprovision
they proposed making for the heir ?
"l1e shall have a tenth part" said
they, "and we will retain for ourselves
the other nine" "Take, then, said
the Judge, "the tenth part to your
selves, and leave the rest to the heir;
for by the will he is to have what part
pleascth YOU" 1
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

Ack Fust---Enter q lap dorg carry
ing boarding skool miss in his arms,
about l6 hands high 1t makes the
dorg puff--the dorg lays down the
boarding skool miss, and orders mint
lulelxs for two, with the usual suck
shun. The dorg begins tow loll the
boarding skool miss tells him "tew
dry up" Gin French,) and the dorg
says i'he be darned il he willp (in
dorg,l great sensashun among the
awjence with cries OF "put him out r
Finally a compromise is affected, the
boarding skool miss kisses the dorg
with tears in hereyes Konklasion--
Lap dorg discovers "a wicked aee at
wo hon' histail--pursoOs him--roHnd
aud ropndthey go-~dorg alittle ahead
--sonebody hollers 4mad dog p
boarding skool miss faints standing
the kurtin drops
Ack number 2--Kurtin rises slowly
big bolona sarsago on the table
bolona sarsage lifts up her head and
begins tew bark-band plays "Old
Dorg Tray" Kat Gums in--kat's tale
begins tow swell--bolona sarsage and
kat has fte. They fite II rounds
the stage is covered with kats and
dorgs-Konklusion-tba all jine hans
and walk tew the iootlights, an old
Bull Tarrier reads the Presidents cal
for 1900, 900 more2-hand plays "Go
in Lemons"-a bell rings and kurtin
willis.
Ack number "A scene on the Erie
kanall--a terrible storm rages-.he
kanall acts bad-several botes 20 down
head fust with awl their boarders on
board--kaut make a lee shore-tha
drag their ankers-some NV them hav
the best luck in swcaring--the water
is strewed with pots and kittles-sev-
eral cook mates swim ashore with
their stoves in their teeth-they hev
to draw off the kanall TO stop the
storm. Konklusion-men seen along
the banks Of the kanall spearing dead
hosses and eels--band plays "a Life
on the Oshun Waive" Amid tremen-
jus applause, the Kurtin falls, and the
awjence disperse, single file.--Josh
Billings.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02


those who favor the adoption OF the
said Constitution that there is no
reason TO doubt that a majority of le-
gally registered voters residing in
the State actually voted at said cleo
ton, and believed they voted for the
Constitution, and that at least ten
thousand legally registered voters at
tempted to vote but were unable to
do so for reasons set forth in paper
published in the Daily Globe of March
II, 1868, and sworn TO by Albert
Griffin, John @. keiier.and others be-
fore a notary public of the City Of
Washington on the 10Th Of February,
1868; and uit
WhereaS, Those registered voters
who opposed tho adoption OF said Con
stitution have no desire to avoid a
thorough and searching f1vestigation
OF all matters connected with said
election; and
Whereas, There is good reason TO
believe-FfrSt, That the freedmen in
large numbers in all or most Of the
counties OF the State refused to vote
for the adoption Of the constitution
when they saw the great body of the
old white citizens, with whom they
were well acquainted, among whom
they had always lived aud with whom
they expect to continue to live, and
who were permanently interested in
the state were opposed to 1t. Sec
ohd, Ihat Their purpose not to vote
was strengthened by the fact that
those white men who were most ac-
tive in favor OF its adoption were new
comers, OF whom they knew little or
nothing, and who had no visible in
terest in the State or the freedmen,
except to get office. Third, That in
many instances these newcomers and
those who aided them, used threats of
violence to the freedmen if they did
not come and vote, and promised
them land and mules-and in this
way induced or scared many into 20.
ing to the polls who would not other
wise have gone. Fourth, That many
freedmen voted who were not of legal
age, and also voted for others who
were unwilling TO come to the polls,
or were unable to. Fifth, That many
freedmen voted more than one ticket,
and in some instances where they
were detected theyexcused themselves
because of Ignorance, and gave the
names of white men, who were candi-
dates for office, as the persons who
had given them the roll Of paper ard
told them to put it into tho box, that
it was all right. lSirth, That many
freedmen voted in counties where
they did not live, as well ms in the
counties where they did live; this
was the case in Mobile, Dallas, Mont
gomery, Barbour, Haiti, Macon, Lees,
Green and MarengO counties, and To
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02


JACK OF CLuBs.-Tommy, my son,
what are you going to do with that
club 2"
"Send il to the editors of the Re-
publican, Of course" goI
"But what are you going to send it
to them forl"
"Cause they say if anybody will
send them club they will send him
a paper NiN o1
The mother nearly tainted, but re.
NAMED conscious enough to ask
"But Tommy, dear, what do you
suppose they want with a club !"
"Well, | don't know" replied the
hopeful urchin, sunless it is to knock
down subscribers as don't pay for their
paper" oi
swell, Tommy, send stout one"
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

Wolfe once appeared in the mess.
room of some Of his officers Just in
time to hear young subaltern re-
mark that, of a certain occasion, he
chad taken a bottle of wine with
Wolfe" He instantly reprimanded
the youngster by asking him some.
what sharply, ADO you not think that
1T would lave been quite as becoming
in you to have said General Wolfe,
sir Y "Not at all, sir" was the quick
witted reply, "who ever heard of Gen
eral Achilles, or General Julius Cesar.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
Mlarble #orhs.
-sssnu cLEARFIELD ,@..a.,
MARBLE WORKS.
Italian and Vermont Marble finished IA
the highest style Of the Art.

citizens OF cicarded county that they have opened
an extensive hiric Yard On iht s0uih west corner
of Market and Fourth atrociF clearhcld, Pa. where
they are prepared ~ mak5 T0mb-stones, Monu-
menis, Yombs, box ana side Iou.bs, Cradle Ton.5a,
Cemetery Posts, Nantes, Shelves, Brackets, etc,
on short notice. They always keep On hand 6
large quantity Of work fnishcd, except the letter
ing. 10 that persons can call and select for them
selves the style wanted. They will also make to
order any Other style Of work that may bs desired,
and they fatter themselves that they can compete
with the manufacturers outside Of the county,
either IN workmanship or price, as they only en-
ploy the best workmcn nf m
.E17All inquiries BY letter promptly answered.
JOHN GULICH.
May %. 1867. HENRY GULICH
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
JAMES BROOKS.
JAM ES b. BECK.


A GooD RECORD. Tho Pennsylva-
mia Railroad Company transported
on their main line of road between
Philadelphia and Pittsburg and its
branches, during the year 1857, three
millions three hundred and forty.sev-
en- thousand four hundred and eighty
six passengers OF this large number,
only one was killed, and this by his
own deliberate act. The passenger
in question was criminal In charge
OF an officer, and attempted to escape
by jumping from car-window while
the train was in rapid motion. He
was of course instantly killed.
Nine passengers were injured dur
ing the year, Of whom eight were hurt
by their own disregard of the rcgula.
tons, forbidding persons to Jump on
or off the trains while in motion The
other case was that of passenger
who had his knee sprained by the
breaking of an axle under the car in
which he was riding. The car was
not broken up or thrown from the
track. The passenger was not in his
seat but standing in the isle, and was
hurt by being jostled against the seat.
This is certainly record which, in
view Of the numberof passengers car
RED, can probably be equaled by no
other American road. 1t is accounted
for by the careful management, through
construction. and maintenance of ma
chinery, cars and track, and by its
shorter distance between eastern and
western cities, whereby the necessity
for excessive rates of speed is savoided.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

a country paper says that tall
Eastern girl, named Short, long loved
a big Mr. Little, while Little, think
ing little of Short, loved little lass
named Long. To make a long story
short, Little proposed TO Long, and
Short longed to be even with Little's
shortcomings. So short meeting Long,
threatened TO marry Little before long,
which caused Little in a short time to
marry Long. Query-Did tall short
love big Little less because Little low.
cd Long r
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

I'll teach you TO play pitch and
toss I'll fog you for an hour, | will"
said a father to a son. "Father p in
stantly replied the incorrigible, as he
balanced penny on his thumb and
finger, an toss you to make It two
hours or nothing"
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

Alabama negro who was opposed
to the Radical league and who used
his influence to keep negroes from vo-
ting at the late so.called election, was
killed last Monday night, about twenty
miles from Montgomery, by a violent
Radical. All right he had no right to
be disloyal. a'll fNoi OF 10 Nnl
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

The Radicalconspirators have spent
three years Of peace in trying TO put
the negro up as ladder for them
selves, but have only succe ded in
bringing disaster upon the country
and defeat to themselves wherever
fair elections have been held.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

"The Lungs of The Lord was the
title Of a Puritan work published in
the days Of Cromwell. "The Breath
Of the Devil" would be good title
for Radical organ in Washington just
at this time, and the fiery John Logan,
who breathes fire and birthstone
whenever he opens his mouth, would
be capital editor for just such a sheet.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
OUR ENGINES AND SAW MILLS
10000 Feet Of Pine Lumber, inch
measure, in Ten Hours
ia Our small silss, Is, 10 and is horse pow
~ are unequaled FOR FAKM PURPOSES
TESTIMONIALS.


TrEosE, Blair Co., Pa, Oct 2s, 1853.
]. II Duvan-- Dear Sir; We have been running
our mill and engine constantly since We receive /
Il. We are cutting from COCO TO 5000 feet per
day. Everything works splendid. Not jonrnAl
heated or anything else gone wrong since we
started, We saw oak and pine logs that are so
large that our saw won't reach through. The
nttle engine drives the saw through with as
apparent ease ns though the log was not half 80
large, We are quite satisfied that we can cut
10000 feet per day.
PRUNER & BURLEY.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

The Philadelphia Sunday Trans
cript, an original Grant paper, in
speaking Of the General, says he has
forfeited all claim to respect as n
gentleman, or confidence as a soldier" {"
and that "ho has suffered his lust for
office to override his manhood" and
further. moro says, "a candidate who
commences his career in deceit will
not fail to find shame if nothing worse,
in the end"
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

Itis reported that very nervous
gentleman onco announced asteamboat
explosion 20 the Connecticut1L 1Legisla.
ture as follows:
"Spister Mccker and lodges of the
memberislaturc. The Elliver Oils
worth has bilcd her buster
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

@Sir, will you please tell me where
the noon-day prayer meeting is held p
asked lady of lawyer in Nassau
street, New York, the other day. The
lawyer looking every way for escape,
at last stammered out, madam you
--you had better try member of
some other profession"
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

Auber recently in answer to a gen
teman who Congratulated him upon
bis remarkable vigor, said (: "Thoy
never so often told me was young
as since have grown old.p
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

"why, George, what are you hoe
ing in the garden for at this time Of
nightT "Well, was awful dry,
mother, and don't the bible say, Ho,
every one that thirstcihw
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02
PRUNER & BURLEY.

SANDY RIDGE, Pa, July 2T, 1858,
j. II. Duvall--sir Our engine and mill works
nicely givesg 60 ID satisfaction. We have sawed
from 5000 to 10000 feet Of lumber per day,
You're, truly,
DILL 4 McCAULEY.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

"Hcrbert, my darling" said fond
mother to her son, al have not seen
your book for several days-where is
it p 81 know where il is.' dwell
whcreY r "Why its only lost a little
kinder in the barn, or round out doors,
some where's, guess, p'raps up gar
ret, or behind the wood pile-l guss.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

LAkE NITf, IA, Uct. II, Ista.
]. II. Duvall-Sir: Our mill and engine works
finely, and gives good satisfaction. We saved
10000 feet Of lumber in eight hours Please
hurry mp my second mill and engine; time is
money nov. Yours, truly,
A. S. RHlNES.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

[From the Brookville Republican, Oct. 70, 1854 !
Coon SAwSG.--We are Informed that on Fri
day last Mr.. Hardesty sawed 40 coo feet Of lum-
Der in eight hours, with the assistance Of four
hands beside himself--iive being the number re-
CURED, The saving was done on one Of Duysll,s
Portable Saw Mills, which Mr. II. has erected
ia Polk township for our enterprising friend, Mr..
A. 5. Rhinea We don't think any mill in the
county can beat this Our lumber men should
call and see the mill in operation.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

An old Indian Chief finding his
hair coming out explained il by say
ing he was dead at the top.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

For Descriptive Circulars, Price Lis. de-. address
J. ii. DuVALL'S Portable Engine Works,
Nos. IS to IS Market Street.
sep5, 67;eowlyl GAINESVILLE, Ohio.
+, @. MILLER, Agent, Clcarfcld, Pa.
Clearfield Republican. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1851-1937, 1868-04-02

HIGHEST PRICE paid in Goods
or Cash for Lumber aud Shingles, at the
cLEARErELD STORE,
nov5-tf Near PhiliP,burr, Ps