Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1868-03-06
"OLIvE THORNR's" ADVICE TO UN
HAPPY MARRIED COUPLES.
From tho Chicago Trbune.l

Marriage, when subjected to public
discussion and comment, made O matter
of bargain, and liable at any moment to
rude exposure in shameless divorce
suits, it is very sad to look upon. But
for the firm belief that no such agitation
indicates the approach to healthful re.
form, and that, after the turmoil and
fermcnt is over, we shall get the clear
wine of q new order of things, nothing
could be more utterly hopeless.
All, if one could drill but q few ideas
into the young heads who so needlessly
rush into marriage, thinking far more Of
the bridal veil and jewels than the long,
long, weary life, which cannot DO
CLOSED over, must be lived, day by day,
hour BY hour-every trial, every sorrow,
every pang endured-lived through and
conquered, or yielded to.
All, If they would but remember that
| life does not end at the altar, a. it does
in ; that in fact it generally
begins there ; that, instead Of being the
| end of q career, it is the first beginning,
to which their life has been but O pre-
Jude.
All, if they could but appreciated the
solemuity Of the promise, "for better,
for worse"
To see the thoughtlessness with which
young people marry is, to o thoughtful
person, simply horrible. In general the
bride is filled with her own Importance.
In courtship she has been the idol, and
she, of course, expects to be so still.
She expects to train his habits; with
uniformed character herself, she modest
" expects to form his character. And,
through all, she, in her heart, expects
to be adored, expects to be the central
figure around which all revolve.
The bridegroom, too-what does he
expect? Alb, we'll we know that. 1t is
drilled into US from our cradles. He
expects q model house q neat, smiling
vito, buttons always on, and dinner
prompt and good. In fact, he expects a
perfectly devoted and charming servant.
Now, in tho name Of common sense,
what chance is there for happiness be-
tween these two, each of whom is bound
up in self-each, of whom expects to sit
still und be adored? No need to tell the
result. Our divorce suits answer.
Marrying with these idens, Of course
they are unhappy. Tho young wife
makes up her mind, in q month OF so,
that she has made q mistake, ind hence
forth the world has no happiness for her
It drives her into n of several things:
either into fashionable society, to di.
vert herself with its novel diversions Of
flirting, etc., etc., (sec divorce suits)
or into frenzied housekeeping, which
is harmless though disagrecable or
into a weak, whining woman, a most
detestable phase Of female possibilities.
Or, If she be thoroughly noble, it makes
of her, after long years-which we will
not paint-a grand, glorious woman
such as occasionally blesses our sight
on earth.
In the husband, It drives either to
amusements and entertainments away
from home, games, wine, or fast horses
or to q tyranuical housemaster, crush.
ing and grinding all individuality under
his iron heel.
Now here is o vital error. Neither OF
the two seems to realize that this is the
turning point 10 their lives. This choice
is TO decide whether they will be
wretched, halfliving objects, and ere
long candidates for divorce, or whether
they will take their wretched life firmly
in hand, and bring order, and even
beauty, out of its fragments. Many
live their whole lives and never find
this ont. Others discover II too late to
effect much. Ali if one could but re.
call all the hating couples, and say to
them in these words.
"My poor friends, you made a mistake
in marriage, probably, but you make a
worse mistake now, In yielding to your
disappointment and folding your hands
to be unhappy the rest of your lives.
You are unfortunately bound for life
to an uncongenial partner, but n hon
orable, one manly and womanly course
is open to you. First make up your
minds, decidedly, that it is irrevocahle,
and then try to make tho CALLING chains
as tolerable as you can.
Resolue-togefher, II possible ; if moi
alone-that If you cannot be happy,
YOU will OF least not be in q torment
that il you cannot love, you will al
least respect, and use common polite
ness to each other.
Resolue, That you will not expect the
other to give up his or her W life, and
live yours, nor will you be constantly
on the gui vipe to find fault, but you will
try to humor each others tastes. In
word, cndeavor to treat your fellow
c%hain-bcarer as you would treat any
lady or gentleman living in the sam
house. Do not, because you are irro'
vocably bound to 1.-Two in the SAM house.
discard all civility from your manners
Believe me, my dear young people, thi'
can be done, has been done, and has
even resulted in happiness"
Very few are utterly incorrigible, and
if husbands, as well as wives, would be
a little moro yielding, verify they would
have their reward, and half the CRIME
and misery In the world would BIO done
away with. OLIVE FHoRsE.