The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1868-09-03
FACTS AND FANc1Es.

FACTS AND FANCIES.
GILL try" as the pork said to the
frying i' ''1P.It % i
"KEEP dark" as the loafer said to
the nigger. atu @
GOOD words and good deeds are the
rent we owe for the air we breathe.
FRUIT trees are more ornamental
than the most fanciful shrubs.
The Hoosac Tunnel burns eight
thousand candles weekly-also the
public candle. at both ends.
In the game of cards, q good deal
depends on good playing, and good
playing on a good deal. 49,.
VEIL now, that's aggrawating," as
the loafer said when he was sentenced
to be hung. gf5 a'.r -taf'
A GENIUs.-"A man who can do
every thing in life except any thing
that's useful" -Bulacer. III M
CURE FOR CoRNs.-Rub them with
toasted cheese and let the mice nibble
it off.
MoDEsTY is to chastity, what the
.casket is to the diamond, when once
it is broken, the jewel may be, posi-
bly,, lost. i'1s. -.'1..s d, 'n' .s-;2 ts- '.a-
GIVE are in the midst of q revolu-
tion," as the man said when he was
caught on the fly-wheel of steam
boat.
STEWARDS INcoME.-A. T. Stewart
returns 1861, ,499 income. Some char
liable person ought to give him dol
lar to make it even. 30 -.'...5
BREv1TY and punctuality are not the
trifiing virtues too many good people
seem by their speech and procrastina-
ton to deem them. -'fs'l 7,'E
A CINCINNATI court has decided
that the relation between step-daugh-
ter and step-father ceases ON the death
of the wife and mother. .i-. ..''-t .a nd
1.-THE poet has said, "just as the
twig is bent, the trees inclined" We
beg to differ-for just as the twig's
inclined, the tree is bent. Who's
right? sS -, ,,ttC,.r. -rsGrsf-E
"MY dear, keep your own side of
the bed and don't crowd so," said a
loafer, when from a deep potation, he
was lying in the gutter and piggy
was roofing him over. :li..a''- ~
aiWHEN does your nose in cold
weather become vegetable? When
it is little reddish! Some noses are
vegetables vegetable in all weather-they are
turn APPS.
: :, a M AAtI[LLtKMAN II AN was awoke by a wag in
the night with the announcement that
his best COW was choking. He forth
with, jumped up to save the life of his
animal, when, lol he found turnip
in the mouth of his pump .....
PARIS, from having been the cheap
est, has become the dearest city in the
world to live in. Water there is paid
for by the gallon, and wood is pur-
chased by the pound. SO tsH'at
LET us never NEEDLE with stfife if
we can help it, and let us have as lit
tie to do as we can with the angry
and the furious; but let us always
stand by the right, and let our silence,
if not our worlds, rebuke all wrong
doers. - ,z'+ i9 2sfs'ia0
An, orator who had raised his audi
ence to a great height by his lofty
soarings, exclaimed, ~ will now close
in the beautiful and expressive Ian
guage of the poet.-I forget his name
--yi.nndfl forget what he said,
too" ..r
FAITH.-A child's faith in his moth
er is wGll illustrated by the following
incident A little boy: disputing with
his sister on some subject, exclaimed,
" It is true, for mether says so and if
she says so, it is SO, if it ain't, ,so.a
sCoRoNERs' JURIEs.-A New Orleans |
Jury declared man to have come to
his death by an "unknown cart.n-
About on par with this is the Phil
sdelphia verdict respecting a man
who had been crushed to death in
mill, when the jury remarked, " No
blame can be attached to tho machin- r
sry.p .fHo .at i45a i.a..s,o Jl9H al'f
VILLAtNY that is vigilant will be an
'ver match for virtue if she slumbers
IN her post: and hence it is that a bad
'ause has often trirmphed over a good
me; for the partizans of the former.
that their cause will do moth
ng for them, have done everything
or themselves; whereas the friends ]
# the latter are too apt to do nothing
or themselves. T24hI II