The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1868-06-18

"dimpled cherub . was about to make his
! appearance; md upon this g the little
mar, =, Mr.. Hugh IA. Moran, Of Kentucky,
q aix-f0oter--was led forward to receive a
huge stick Of candy. He begun his re-
spouse as follows ,,.;,. ..,.,,.
gssYou'dscaree expect boy like me o. Z
10 get up here where an can see, a. w
And q. mike speech cha e Msli ss those oss.o
| 2 y shink It WAS In oldcn time Sls5s,Iss
aeses IRON ls. 1,,,s rs'sss sfS now
~ And If that rhymer Told the truth - ss.6sai
y Though am now a little youth x IDS tgsi
Perhaps Iil:niake rs great 2 NOISE pse,. !,
some who are much larger Doys' - ~
After expressing his establishment at his
elevation TO this high position, since, I" like
Goliath. his prototype of ole, when struck
nv u atone, he was astounded because such
q thing had neyerlentered his head BEFORE"
he entered into d defence OF little men.
was not Napoleon, called thei q Little Cor
|. poral z nazIsn't Tom Thumb q General, and
wasn't Jack qiant-killer 2 Don't we read
about Goliath ten feet high, and 0loso
second only to one among all the blows
who ever lived, and how little man by the
name Of David got a-hedd Of himS Why,
the famous diamond worth more than a
kingdom isn't bigger than piece Of chalk.
A whaling big fish once gotta little Jew
named Jonah dopn, but he could not Eeep
him DOOM No doubt some Of our g zYe,'d-T
6len Faculty will Join me in this opinion.
As they say '",tdown South 8 we-uns
think so whether :" yots-aias " think or
not. Last but not least, must not forget
to mention the dignifed president of this
organization, who aspires 70 the proud
title of 1.-THE " Little Commodore" Of
the Washington College Navy, COM s
handing Department of North River,
near the Club" of Virginia.. There
are many advantages which small; boys
have over the restsfofs Inankind-many
of the ills of life which they are not heir
to. They. never puzzle their, brains with
Latin subiunctives and Greekr roots; there
is no orat;o oblqua! for them ;%no revolving
of cycloids and no endless ldifferentials
no breaking of. shoe-strings in trying to con-
ceive Of lines meeting at infnity. No!
none of these for him. He can play in the
mud, wade the branch, eat green apples,
attach tin cans to the caudal narratives OF
members of the canine species, and various
other things of the kind, in which We
muohly delight. Besides, too, he is the re-
cipient of. various little fayors ut the hands
of the ladies' piece of cake or a stick OF
candy; or, perhaps, now and thenIa kiss
q mean q candy kiss). would state, how
ever, that the " little man" Of the Ugly
Club positively declines any such treatment.
He said, in conclusion, 4" Now, as it is time
all good little boys should be in bed, and as
I cannot, possibly avoid the land Of
Nod while the Bore breaches to- you, ]
and Coleman blows up q Callathump; and
since small boys should be, seen and not
heard, wish you all apleasant good night
and quiet dreams-during the rest Of the
performance" ~"
The President then introduced "ithe
lady's man of college, Mr.. j. w. Ewing, of
Tennessee. The past months Of leap year
have been an exciting time to Mr. Ewing.
With the golden sickle of his fascination he
has encircled the growing crop and reaped
an abundant harvest of beauty, He has
gathered in and thoroughly shocked q large
number of the loveliest ladies of the land
Sir,',-turning to Mr.. Ewing and handing
him garter. in the name of the ladles
dub you a Knight Of the Carter MIR.
Ewing supposed that he had been eleVa.
ted to the high position Of GO Lady's Man
because he was trife the best looking OF
the Ugly Club, (which is the ugliest coflec-
ton of individuals outside OF the Faculty
in Virginia." He was proud Of the HONOR
since he loved all the ladies. For the bene-
fit of the graduates in English he would
onalyse woman to be ga lnoun--com-
mon noun-yery, common demonstrating
as it does to a class Of objects, or, to be more
particular, either to q lady with beauty, or
fog,ladies without. Case Nariable-some-
times hard, but more frequently remark
ably soft-subject of the verb will gossip
and modified in great measure by.the
Young gentlemen, and the adjectives grand,
gloomy, and peculiar. AS regards signiti-
cation, she signifies in a way which all
hen-pecked husbands are supposed to be
acquainted with. AS regards meaning, she
means exactly the reverse of what she
saws. After some other good hits, he
closed with beautiful tribute to woman,
and especially in her character Of &C Mo
ther." = t .a. LOO.
Then followed the presentation Of the
rocking chair to Mr.. W., B. McChesney, of
Virginia, as the I" lazy man.; the auger to
Mr.. j. II. Hunt, of New Jersey, as the
"college bore" and the horn to Mr.. Frank
Coleman, Of Alabama, as the "greatest
blow" There were some fine passages in
the speeches of these gentlemen, which
want Of space will forbid our giving. 5ir
The President thus introduced the
&C critic % of the evening 6 The.gentlemen
who have Just addressed you will now be.
sold to the highest bidder by Mr.. W. L.
Sellers. This red-headed lad is not the one
spoken Of in the lay Of Joe Bowers but
an equally handsome youth, born and
raised in classic old Virginia. As far MS
regards the royal signet of the Tycoon ugli-
ness upon the features Of Mr.. Sellers, you
will agree with me that it consists Of copious
spots Of red mud" -,
Mr.. Sellers delivered a lengthy criticism
upon the dignitaries Of the Club. and their
speeches, and very frequently excited up
roarous laughter and applause by his sallies
of wit or his dry humor. s5zis go
The celebration was, considered on the
whole, decided success; and all went
away feeling that hearty laugh is q good
thing, and wishing their uglinesses q happy
return of many more anniversaries. -
+ General Wade Hampton was expected by
! the packet this morning, and preparations
made so give him cordial reception. The
Society committees went in hacks, with .
band Of music, TO- meet him, the students
formed q procession to escort him to his
quarters, and the whole town was ready to
!doh honor to the great ehieftain but he
failed to come, and We are anxiously look
ing for him tonight. his5 asSf 1855
h l'p,as ea,,,t l;ffle anisofiea In the exercises