The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1868-08-14
.Yantotk tkgefftrsonian,
NASBY.

nations at the Corners.
Post Offs, Confedrit Y Roads,
|. (Wich is in the State NV ky.,f
July 81, 1857
We he'd last mite ratification meet
limo at the Corners wich started out
Iglorionsly but didn't end so happily
Iez it mite. 1 he'd gone to a good
Ideal NV trouble about it and he'd
made all arrangement for feast NV
reason and flow NV sole exalted by
few ratiiications and surpassed by
none.
The blessid Deacon, McPelter and
issaker Gavitt who expect respect
lively to hold the posishens Nv Asses
sor. Collector, and whiskey Inspector
for this district, come dwon hand
somery with the funds, enuff to ena-
Bile me to dekorate the post oils with
flags and transparescies, and myself
with pare NV ready made. pants,
wich muddied considerable to make
EN- look old so that they shood not
suspect ther funds he'd bin applied in
that way. Human nacher is ipscru-
table mystery. They wood objeck
did they know he'd clothed myself
with ther money instead Nv wastin it
on taller candles and sich, wich burn
out and leave nothin behind.
l wuz economikle in my expendl-
toors, or rather little expense wuz
nessary. Desirin to wake the en-
thoosiasm NV the Democrisy, l pro-
coored parsel Nv Confedrit battle
flags, witch the returned heroes bed
brot home with EN-, and he'd the tails
manic words, "Seymour and Rlare, ="
painted across EN-. The effeck wuz
gorgus. Ez mite approacht L he'd
| tire rransprrcncTes saved over TOM
celebrashen wich he'd bin held af-
ter Chickamauga lighted up. The
enthoosiasm, ez the populace saw
these, and listened to Captin Nc
Pelter, ez he red EN- to EN-, wuz over
powerin. How they cheered ez the
words fiasht out into the mite, ''South-
ern Rites, Southern Men, and a
Southern Government" death to
Northern Hirelins - "Down with
the gorilla Linkin ~ "Jeff Davis and
the Confedracy forever mo quar-
ter to Fedral invadersr' And when
Boregard's black flag, onto wich
Seymour and Blair" wuz painted in
red letters, wuz unfurled, ther arose
sich cheers for the nominees Nv the
Moo York Convenshun ez he'd nev-
er heerd before, nor expect to again.
At this time jist ez everythin wuz
q gitin red hot the trouble cOmmenc
ed. Pennibacker, wich runs our big
gist and best distillery, jumped into
the platform, at my suggestion, and
proposed three cheers for Seymour
and Greenbacks, and three groans
for the bloated bondholders. The
crowd, with troo Dimokratic docility,
wuz agoin to cheer, when BascOm,
who hez some 5:20's riz and swore
that he'd be id eff that shood be-
"Governor Seymour is in favor of
payin the Nashnel Indebtedness,
principle and interest, in gold. Reed
his speech at the Cooper Institoot.
s'Is he? is hep shoutid Penni-
backer, springing onto the platform,
sis he? Reed the platform wi,h he
accepts!"
"Don't Belmont and the eastern
bankers support hiG2 yelled Bascom.
"Don't Vallandygum, Pendleton,
Brick Pomroy and dirty shirt Dean
support him ?' yelled Penaibacker.
"Yoor doctrin,' sed Bascom, ex-
citedly, ''is a id swindle-a peace
NV theevin, wich a Arab wood be
ashamed NV, and Seymore sed So"
"Yoor proposishen is outrage onto
opprest people, a grindin NV EN- into
the earth under the heels NV bloated
aristocrats and pamperd sons NV lux
ury, and the platform Seymour stands
onto sez so,'' shouted Penniback-
er.
"Yoor a swindler," excitedly yell
ed Bascom, whereupon they clinch-
ed and rolled OFF the platform titely
huggin, and making extraordinary
physikle efforts at injoorin each 9th
er.
To direct the attenshun Nv the
populis from this untoward circum-
stances, / rekested Issaker to sing
out three cheers for Blare!
"Three cheers foT Blare." sung out
Issaker. "the Missouri statesman.
who will rid us NV Frecdman's Bur
ows and military rool"
"Three cheers for Blarel'' yelld
Punt,--"a Ablishnisiand Linkin hire
lin, wich shot my unkle in Missoury,
and burnt my grandmother's house
near Vixbursp p'
ale aint no Ablishinist exclaim-
Issaker, "reed his letters"
ats difficult to say wat he is to day
but Ill sware to it he wuz three years
ago, but, it makes no difference.
/ swore four year ago to lick any
man who hurrahed for any member
NV the Blare family"
And this infooriated wretch pounc-
ed onto Issaker, and they rolled of
the stand to join Bascom and Penni
backer, who hadn't settled their on
pleasantnis yet.
Before it ended Deekin POgram
and Kernel McPelter got to arguin
ez TO the propriety NV recOgnizin
niggers in the ranks Nv the party, the
Deekin takin one side and McPelter
the other. The passions nv these es-
timable gentlemen wuz 'rOuzel some
wat, and before l Good interfere they
he'd each other by the throte and
rolled urf onto the ground beneath
the platform. / sprang down to
separate EN-, which MePelter turned
upon me, and wood hev sacrificed
ne on the spot. but the Corners rusht
az man to save me. Ez / owe the
most NV EN- l am entirely safe here,
md ez l shel be ontil 1 pay my debts
shel never die NV violence.
At this pint the iite became gener-
Al. Some NV the people sided with
BascOm, some NV EN- with Penni
Dacker, (akkordin ez they bought
whisky by the bari, or by the drink,
md the balance Nv EN- assisted Big.
er and Issaker Gavitt ez ther incli- ,
1ashun promptid EN-. In the melee !
he platform, flag and transparcies |
Tuz tore down, nearly breakn nv ]
eg, for wich / wuz insuflishently re- :
by the hankerchers l bor-