The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1868-10-19
The Democratic Wake.

On Saturday night the mourners over the
corpse of Democracy held formal and time
honored wake at Ninth and Arch, and the
merits of the dear departed were expatiated
on in full by Brown and Ingersoll and Meany
and Miles. The intim ate relations subsisting
between the deceased and Mr.. Charles Inger-
soil, and the hardships they had undergone
together, made his remarks peculiarly affect
ing. Probably they would have been much
more rational had he not, like his distin-
guished namesake Charles |. lost his head.
AS consequence he rambed on like some
garrulous grandfather who attends the fune-
raj of his descendant. Such of the speech,
however, as was said in commemoration of the
dead and as a consolation to the living, we
cheerfully make room for.
The orator commenced by telling the sad
thing that the democratic party, like the
old French Guard, never surrenders-it dies
first" This is satisfactory explanation of the
mourners being present, but we would like to
know whether the entire Democratic party
concurs with one of its wings, and prefers the
'last ditch" as resting place The Southern
Democracy would never surrender, 1t said,
but it has not yet made mausoleum of that
mythical Glitch" Can it be that the immortal
Democratic party will agree with Hudibras,
that she who fights and runs away will live
to fight another day." and repudiate the
valiant threat Of the lofty Ingersollf
But despite all valorous declarations, the
awkward fact remains the same, that the
party was beaten, badly beaten. Now, how
must that fact be overcomef Clearly by
charges of fraud. So the great Ingersoll pro-
ceeds to charge fraud in that the Republican
judges of election referred to refused the
votes of newly naturalized citizens. BY this
means, says the sublime Ingersoll, the State
was 'lost to us by eight thousand majority"
Ergo, it must be that, in addition to the six
thousand votes fraudulently polled by these
men, there were eight Thousand more who did
of twenty-five seconds to man in the
Supreme Court is too much Ten seconds
is about the true average. And
because these votes were refused Mr..
Ingersoll proceeded to display his logic. He
said
"a man derives his vote from the Constltu.
uon, the right of suffrage belonging TO the ma
tive and naturaized citizen, To thro
out the votes of all naturaliZed citizens the Re-
pubicans would throw out the vo.es of all
Democratic citizens"
All A is B, all C is D, therefore all is F.
Such is the logic of Mr.. Ingersoli. Ii Bansby
hasn't rival at last
After explaining how it happened that de-
feat occurred, whioh-upon the principle that
every man who falls on pavement the mo-
ment he rises looks carefully for the piece of
orange peel on which he slipped was a salts
factory occupation, the orator went on to de-
rive consolation from the melancholy event.
He said:-
THE consequences of being defeated would
not be irreparable to the party. In the next
!onr years there are TO be com mmercial revolu-
uons 'hat no one can prevent; and The Demo
Odt Of sc so1ders T2e ony M"Se 20 TJ' s
losing this Presidential election is That You
! the interval"
| Would any insolent wretch dare to suggest
in connection with the name of the sublime
Ingersoll, that odious proverb of sour grapes
Perish the thought But still it is really re-
markable that the Democracy was desirous to
bear this "odious burden" of commercial
revolution, and strove so hard and committed
so many frauds and perjuries to subject them
selves to it. We congratulate them on their
escape--not the slight straw's weight OF that
"odium" will not rest on them for many years
to come.
A champagne cork, it is said, is eagerly
seized by drowning man as a buoy to beai
him up. The cork which Mr.. IngersOu threw