The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1868-03-12
EPitaphs.

From Temple Bar.
Epitaphs in England are of three orders,
each with two classes. There is the COM
monplace unobjectionable (such as the
mere name and date, with text or two
added), and the commonplace extremely
Objectionable, such as:
Addiction sore, Long time bore''
Then there is the grotesque Intentional,
and the grotesque unintentional. Among
the former we should rank the epitaph on
Mr.. Foote, of Norwich:
:" Here lies one Foot, whose death may thousands
save,
For Death hath now one foot within the grave. -
And the one on Mr.. Box:
''Here lies one box within another,
The one OF wood was very good,
We cannot say so much for tother.''
Also the famous one of Sir John Strange !:
6 Here !ies an honest lawyer,
That is Strange
And Albert Durers epitaph for himself
certainly the shortest, and perhaps the
best in the world--the meet inscription for
the closed door Of the House appointed for
all living, the one word Emigravit."
And this one on belloWs-maker
"Here lies John Melows
The Prince of Good Fellows,
Clerk of AIl-hallows,
And maker of bellows,
He bellows did mend till the day of his death !;
breath.
And this, at Manchester, on an old man
''Here lies John Hill,
man of skill,
His age was i've times ten;
lie meier did good,
Nor ever would.
Had he lived as long again.
And this on dyer:
Beneath this turf a man doth lie,
Who dyed to live, and lived to die"
As for the unintentionallv grotesque ep-
itaphs they may be found in almost every
churchyard in England. Now and then,
when we hear of them, we have suspi-
cion that they are "too good to be true, y
but he who has had any experience
of British monumental stupidity, will
hesitate to put limits to the absurdity
it may display. The following are a few
which we recall to mind, emitting such as
we happen to have elsewhere seen in
print. Can anything be more simply
touching than The second line OF this coup.
let:
s'IN MEMORY OF JOHN DAILY, SC.
He died of Quinsy,
And was buried at Binsy."
Or the third of this triplet:
Here lieth wrapt in cl: =,
The body of William Wray
L have no more to say"
There is certainly no lack Of faith dis
played IN the following, which is, we be.
lieve, to be found in Sunbury churchyard
"A-B@
Left Sunbury,
And started for Paradise,
June 25th, is"
Very different is the sceptical, not tc
say rollicking, tone of the inscription over
a certain Gabriel John:
| Here lies the body of Gabriel John,
Who died in the year eighteen hundred and one
Pray for his soul, or letit alone,
For it is all one 10 Gabriel John,
Who died in the year eighteen hundred and one
There is fearful weight of innuendo
conveyed in this stern, brief notice in the
churchyard Of Cotten-Hackett, Worces
tershire:
'sHere lies the body of John Galley in expccta
tion of the Last Day.
Wha t SCI OF man ne a'ds taaS aay a0'" o's
Here is another cruel remark on 8
doctor:
'sHere lies the corpse of DIR. Chard,
Who filled the half of this churchyard
and still more unpardonable one on 8
lady, possible of those loquacious tenden
cies too often harshly attributed to bel
sex:
" Here rests in silent clay,
Miss Arabella Young,
Who. on the 21st of May.
BeyG', 10 hold her tongue"
This is as bad as the unkind hint conveyed
in the following:
Here lies Margaret Sexton,
Who never did aught to veX one.
Notlike the Woman ander the neat stone"
The following is simple at all events
1t is at Melton Mowbray, in Leicester
shire:
Here lies the wife of Simon Stokes,
Who lived and died like other folks"
Grief and selfshness are finely mingled
in the following, b. wiGo> er:
s'FVe lost the con- - life,
Death came and took awaJ my wife.
And now don't know what to do,
Lest death should come end take me, too.
Grammar is postponed in the next tt
high poetical and moral consideratl ton:
ssShe's gone and not come to we,
But we shall shortly 60 to She"
Another is grossly personal:
IS Reader wherever thou be, oh, tread not hard,
| For Tadlow lies all over this churchyard."
In the churchyard of st. John, Worces
| ter, there is an epitaph which, if brevity
| be the soul of wit. has high claim to tina
character. The arrangement of the aux
iliary verb is, at all events, original. I
reads thus:
| "Honest John
IS dead and gonei"
A UhanDu concpit II Uoa dnr1ht1nes