The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1868-09-24
10 is5i;es side I Called the Chamber

maid on the gents sidei The result
was, that the young lady left the hotel
in .disguskEor in cab, 4 forget which !
The other lady who had been mar
.rfed and lost her husband in another
room, complained to him as soon as |
she found him, and he came to pay |
visit to the Office. n5
"Why didn't you put me in a room
with my wife. sir? Do you keep
Quaker house 2"
!. began to quake. EsE b;
"Why didn't you put her down as
your wife, sir 2" said 1. ~ - p
sI did, sir" he said.
referred in triumph to the regis
ter. "There it is, you see, Samuel
Jones and lady. 1t don't say anything
about her being your wife [ keep a
respectable house" 8iH
He looked at me one moment. with
Iscorn depicted in his countenance,
called for his bill, and left in the first
omnibus without paying it. l knew
he was friend of mine by a remark
he made, as he was about leaving. No
matter what he said. nf 4gt-
I got in huff. rung for the por-
ter, and rung SO many times it brought
the cook. l wanted the watchman,
but called the chambernaid. sent
baggage up Red River that ought to
have gone to Mobile, and sehtsthe
owner of it off on the Jackson Rail-
road! I got the baggage out of la.
dy,s room and sent it off with Tex
an to Galveston; and when he got
there he had nothing but an extra bon.
net, a hoop skirt, two setts of corsets
and some - for a change! The Tex.
an threatens to lasso me the next time
he catches me.
: In the evening, among other guests
| at tea, was a raw Frenchman, who
could not speak English. He wanted
a waiter, waiter to bring him some
thing. and SO he sung out " Garcon!
garcon!" and he beckoned with his
finger. The waiter came up, and he
repeated it-"Garcon!" The waiter
who was of noble birth (from LINER
ick), looked up at the gaslight and
exclaimed, Indignantly, "There's gars
on now what dyer want of any more
gars on"
The Frenchman didn't see it in that
lightv OF course he appealed to me,
and as l talked French f1uidly (having
learned it in the French markeD, /
explained to him that my walters did
not understand French, but they were
some on Creek The Frenchman
thought I referred to Greek fire, and
that my walters were all Fenians, and
so he left without paying his bill.
L began, to get furious, and as / did
not care to attack anybody bigger than
1 was, commenced on my boy Sid
ney, and threw all the blame on him.
But my guests were so uncharitable
and mean as to say that didn't
know my business" and that Ihad
"better go to Algiers and go to settin'
hens for living" or "driving geese
to water. and all such unchivalric
suggestions. When I went through
the pantry and other places, the fel-
lahs sung out to me " to pay my foot
in'," until 1 had a notion of footin'
every one of 'em.
Then somebody stole the key to the
wine room, and everybody got drunk.
The chambermaid got on ".strike," :"
and the barkeeper got on strike, too,
and " struck out from the shoulder"
A man from the country, who occu-
pied one of the rooms, blew his gas
out, and died on my hands, without
cent to bury him with. A slop bucket
was tipped over up stairs, and the dir
| ty water from bath-tubs and wash
bowls came trickling down on to the
chignon of belle who was playing
I" Champagne Charlie" on the piano in
the parlor. Of course she didn't send
for me and give me fits, andI was
glad to let her leave without paying
her BILL - .s
Then along came the editor of ''The
! Gullotine of Freedom, or the Gofer OF
the Gulf" and he gave me the follow
ing notice -
2" We had the pleasure of stopping
at the popular and well-known hotel
in New Orleans, kept by that chival-
rous, high-toned and gentlemanly
landlord, Mr.. A. Head. What he don't
know. about hotel amt worth know
ing. Always attentive, courteous,
| good-natured, accommodating, self
sacrificing, and sociable, a perfect con-
noisseur and epicure, he stands at the
Head of the hotel business in this
country of Africa. His taste is ex-
cellent, and his buckwheat cakes may
be called E Plugf6us Unum,. Long
may he waVe." ~ : a
The above was entirely disinterested
on the part of this editor. He was
the only man that really appreciated
me. 5.r ...,...,.,l.sl
| But at twelve o'clock at night gave
up the keys of the hotel, and quit.
Although am "some with knife
and fork, "can't keep hotel" I am
now in the bone boiling business, and
find that my genius tends more in that
direction than in bookkeeping. But
if any of my old customers that
stopped with me while / kept a hotel,
come to New Orleans, / am afraid
they won't leave bone in my body to
boil.-Neac Orleaus Creseut