Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1868-10-20
CGrpec-BGg.


Is an egg an egg-sheH- arating refreshment.
Can cock-crowing, be called (h)enchanting
Motto for late euchre parties-Burn the mid
night Hoyle.
How to make tall man ''short." Borrow
from him.
In domestic state do hares sit upon chairs
as well as forms?
The difference between boatman and lion
is not so great as might be supposed-the lat
ter has a roar, and the former is rover
WHILE crossing ferry little three year old
was heard to exclaim, as she saw sail boat. -
ooh, mamma, there s boat with bonnet on Z
WHEN deer escapes the huntsman and gets
back to the head, can he be called jolly good
Jallou0?
WHY may barber be said to fetter the al
phabet? Because he ties up q,teus. and puts
toapees in irons
An eminent painter, on being asked what he
mixed his colors with to give so fine an effect.
answered, Il mix them with brains, sir -
A man out West, who offered bail for friend,
was asked by the Judge if he had any incum,
brance on his farm. ''Oh yes" said he. INV
old woman.
WHEN yong gentleman in Canada wishes
to pay attention to young lady he usually. if
it be winter undertakes to kill her with kind
ness-by taking her out and sleighing her.
A WAC, in describing the effect of a certain
would-be-tragedian's style, on particular &C.
casion, said: 1T caused the hair to stand on
every bald head in the vast assembly,
Asailor, exhorting at prayer-meetng in q
London chapel, said that on dark, stormy
nights, while on the sea, he had often been
comforted by that beautiful passage of Scrip.
ture, "A faint heart never won fair lady.
WHEN herd of red deer are pursued. and
one is wounded, does he Stdg-ger, and is he left
behind?
he come there a robin
WHERE is game to be found besides unon
land that Is pdrtradged?
Recipe for Finding Husband.
More common sense and less wit.
More useful occupation and less mus;c
More study of the Mysteries of the Kitchen
and less Of the Mysteries of Paris.
More mending Of shirts and STOCKINGS and
less making Of bracelets. ''''''
Less display. OF toilets that appal the purses
of candidates for wedlock. fN'''0''
More proof to men that they will find in n
wife helpmeet and not an embarrassment
This recipe, if thoroughly tried. will great
ly lessen the number Of bachelors. 0
A PRAYER WITH VARIATIONS. worry IL
tie boy after giving everybody a good .n;obt
kiss, kneeled at his mothers knee to saw b;s
evening prayer. His mother had that dav
been teaching him the piece commencinp ~
QUO scarce expect one ofmy age" &C.. and
1t appears that these verses were runnino
through his head. lie commenced the PRAYER
as follows Now lay me down to sleep. I
pray the Lord my soul to take: if should
chance to tall below Demosthenes or Cicero,
don't view me with cricket eve ssSfon
stop, said his mother, THAT isnta mart II
the prayer. les it Isl the little fellow re-
pied, yes 1t Is, ma ma, do 1T view me with .
cricket's eye" INV WIN d
maxlms for Young Ladies'
Don't scream unless you are Iriohtnpod
A narroWness OF waist shows narrowness of
mind. D''io"''css Vi
1t Is fine silk that knows no turning
Practlce Ton the piano. makes perfect
An old maid is an odd boot-no use without
fellow use "i'noue
The true test of a mans temper is to keen
HIM waiting ten minutes for his dinner.
never 1alnt When you are alone Always Sc
ice 1ect some goou opportunlty-or young man. -
The more persons there are abnnt Won tbo
more successful will be your fl a 1Too ,no
should not only faint well, but be above snsn;.
eion.
The hand that can make pie is a continual
feast to the husband that marries it. '"'
Dreams are the novels that we read when MO
are asleep.
Eyes are the electric telegraph of the heart
that will send message any distance in Ian.
guage only known to the two souls who cores
pond.
Slight Of Hand Performance girl that
rejects an offer of marriage