Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1868-08-18

1 fVoF OfFIS, NOSFEDRRIf X ROADS.
| witch is In tho State nv Kentacky9l
| July 81, 1865
We he'd last mite O ratification
meeting at the Corners, wich started
out gloriously, but didn't end so hap
lily ez it mite. | he'd gone to a good
deal NV trouble about it, and he'd
made all arrangements for feast NV
reason and flow of sole exalted by
few notifications and surpassed by
none.
The blessid Deacon. McPelter, and
lssaker Gavitt, who expect respect
lively to hold the posishens Nv Asses
sor, Collector, and whiskey Inspect
or for This district, come down hand
somely with the funds, enuff to en-
able me to decorate the post offs
with flags and transparencies and
myself with a pare Nv pants, which
| muddied considerable to make EN-
look old so that they shood not sas-
pect cher funds he'd bin applied in that
way. Human nacher is inscrutable
mystery. They wood objeck did
they know he'd clothed myself with
Their money instead NV wastin it on
taller candles and SIGH, which burn
out and leave nothin behind.
wuz ekonomikle in my expendi>
toors, or ruther but little expense
wuz nessary. Desirin to wake the en-
thoosiasm Nv the Democrisy, l pro-
Coored a passed. NV Confedrit battle
flags, the returned heroes he'd brot
home with EN-, and he'd the talisman-
ic..words, Seymour and Blair" paint
ed across EN-. The effeck wuz gor>
gus Ez mite approcht | he'd the
transparencies saved over from a cell
ebrashen witch he'd bin held after the
battle Nv Chickamauga lighted up
Tine enthoosiam, ez the populace saw
these, and listened to Capt. McPelter.
ez he red EN- TO EN-, wuz overpower-
in. How they cheered ez the words
tiasht out into the mite. Southern
rites, southern men, and a southern
government |" death to Northern
Hirelins p 'Down with the gorilla
Linkin p Jeff Davis and the Con
federacy forever = "No quarter to
Federal invaders !" And when Be-
regards black flag, onto witch "Sey-
mour and Blair wuz painted in red
letters, wuz unfurled, Their arose SIGH
cheers for the nominees Nv the Moo
York Convenshun ez | he'd never
heerd before nor expect to agin.
At this time jist ez everythin wuz
a gittin red hot the trouble common
houIynu soh
biggest and best distillery, jumpt on
to the platform, at my suggestion,
and perposed three cheers for Sey-
more and gfeenbax. and three groans
for the bloated bondholders. The
crowd with troo demokratic docility,
wuz agoin to cheer, when Bascom,
who hez some 5 2Os, riz, and swore
that he'd be id eff that shood be.
"Gov. Seymore is in favor of payin
the Nashnel Indebtedness, principle
and interest, in gold. Reed his
speech at the Cooper Instoot."
"Is he? is he ?" SHOUTED Penni-
hacker, springing onto the platform,
sis he Read the platform witch he
accepts y
"Don't Belmont and the eastern
bankers support him ?" yelled Bas-
com.
"Don't Vallandygum, Pendlelon,
Brick Pomeroy, and dirty shirt Dean
support him p yelled Pennibacker.
"Yoor doctrin, sed Bascom excited
ly, lis id swindle-a peece NV
theevin witch Arab wood be asham~
ed nv, and Seymore sed So"
Your proposishen is a outrage onto
opprest people, grindin Nv EN- in
to the earth under the heels Nv bloat
ed aristocrats and pampered sons of
luxury, and the platform Seymore
stands onto SEE so" shouted Penni-
hacker.
"Yoor a swindler," excitedly yell
ed Bascom, whereupon they clinched
and rolled orr the platform titely
huggin, and maxim extraordinary
physikle efforts at INFORM each 9TH
| err.
To direct the attenshun Nv the pop
ulis from this untoward circumstance,
| rekested Issaker to sing out three
cheers for Blare
"Three cheers for Blare |" sung out
Iesalxor, E'tho Missouri statesman, rho
will rid us NV Freedman's Burrows
and military rool r
"Three groans for Blare ~ yelled
Punt-a Ablishinist and Linkin hire.
lin, which shot my unklc in Missou-
ry, and burnt my grandmother's
house near Vixburg /"
Gle amt no Ablishinist p exclaim~
ed Issaker, creed his letters p
''Its difficult to say wat he is to day,
but I'll sware to it he wuz three
years ago, but it makes no difference.
| swore four years ago to lick any
man who hurrahed for any member
NV the Blare family"
And this infooriated wretch poun-
ced onto Issaker, and they rolled off
the stand to join Bascom and Penni-
hacker, who hadn't settled their on
pleasantnis yet.
Before it ended Deekin Pogram
and Kernel McPelter got to arguin
ez to the propriety Nv recognizin
niggers in the ranks Nv the party,
the Deekin takin one side and
McPelter the other. The passions
Nv these estimable gentlemen were
aroused somewat, and before Good
interfere they he'd each other by the
throte and rolled OFF onto the ground
beneath the platfoam. Isprang down
to separate EN-, when McPelter turn
ed upon me, and wood hev sacrificed
me on the spot, but the Corners
rusht ez a man to save me. Ez
owe the most NV EN- am entirely
safe here, and ez | shell be ontil pay
my debts | shell never die Nv VIC
| lence.
At this pint the fife became gen
eral. Some Nv the people sided with
Bascom, some NV EN- with Penhiback
er (akkordin ez they bought whisky
by the barl, or by the drink and tn
balance w EN- assistee Bigler and Is
eal,ar Eovitt OF their iuclinasha al