The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1868-02-12
HUMOROUS.

A FLIRT- is the dipper Of public
pump, which all may drink at, but
none carry away.
IT is said the census embraces
seventeen millions ofsWomen." Who
wouldn't be. census?
AN editor, referringto patent me-
tallic air tight collins says ]" No per-
son once having tried these collins,
will ever use any other"
THE following beautiful sstanza is
copied from lady's album
Fare made, when B holdure Ease
& gaize into ure ashure ize-
my iPve Is wormed IN Raan 6lsze.
big far mi week tung utter, - -.
~ which leves mi hartawl in 1utter. 5"
TEE New York Evening Post thus
happily versi6es the case of " ooBnu-
bal infelieity at Lee, Kassachu
sets: p
There is an old couple in lee, -
Who connubially cannot agree,
So their house they Divide and each
lives on one side.
The cantakerest couple in Lee.
VALUE the friendship ofhim who
stands by you in the Storm; swarms
of insects will surround you in the
sunshine.
1t is a pharisaic and very common
evil that men are very much more
troubled about setting others right in
their living than about directing
Observation-Disclosures.
A WAC says that once on a journey
he was put into sleigh with dozen
or more passengers, not one of whom
he knew, but on turning sharp cor
ner the sleigh upset, and then, said
he, l found them all out. y
In ancient days the preeept was
+" Know myself" In modern times
it has been supplanted by the far
more fashionable maxim, Know thy
neighbor and everything about him. "
THE newspaper is a sermon forthe
thoughtful, library for the poor,
and blessing to everybody. Lord
Brougham called it the 4" best public
instructor. y
WIFE (anxiously)-" What did that
young lady observe that passed just
now?" Husband with a smile of
calm delight)-" Why, my love, she
observed rather a good looking man
walking with an elderly female-that's
all ahem!"1 = e
A BIBLE class was asked to name
the precious stones named in the
Bible. After several scholars had
given answers. one little fellow called
out Well, Thomas, what precious
stones have. you found?" " Brim-
stone" was the reply. 8 G
a GENTLEMAN who had by a fall
broken one Of his legs, was mention
ing the pain be felt. A surgeon who
was present, asked him if the injury
he sustained was near the vertebra?
/" No, sir, replied he, " it was within
a few yards Of The court house"
THACKERAY said the drollest thing
he heard while in this country, and
the most characteristically American,
was the remark of New Yorker: oh,
| have no objection to England, Mr..
Thackeray; rhe only thing Izshou1d
be afraid ofawould be to go out at
night there, lest | might step off.
A PARIS 4andla6y requested "a
Christmas psrty on the third floor, to
cease dancing, as a man below them
was dying The guests acquiesced.
Returning am hour later, " My dear
children, she exclaimed, with the
most benevolent smile, you may be-
gin again, he Is dead"
. "A GENTLEMAN in this city has a
bright little five year old, who often
puzzles him by her questions. On
Sunday she went for her parternal
ancestor as follows: Pa, rs dogs got
wings?" :" Wings? no, childs don't
you know better than that?" = Why,
pa. my First Reader says a big dog
feso at man and bit him; so I guess
dogs as got wings, too" Pa quit in
pdesFaiT. q