Evening star., 1868-02-20
THE EVENING STAR.
LOCAL EW s.
AmuS.ments. Ae Tonight.

and agility.
WALLS OPERA HoUsE-La Rue's Carnival
hinstrels A good performance and $40 IN
greenbacks given away.
ODD PILLOWS HALL.-FITst Grand Ball of
the Lone Star Club.
STorT's HALL, goth street and PENNSYLVANIA
ayenue.-Ieeture by Rev. DR.. Little iohn of
Brooklyn, ". Y, for benefit of s., PauPs
Church. Subject: Reading for the MiIlion.n
Lecture on Statistics before the Statistical
Society by the Hon. Alexander Delmar,
statistician.
Our Government has not only a Statistician
but It's Statistician has a Statistical Society,
which meets on Saturday nights at the City
Hall, and listens TO lectures on Statistics from
Tie statistic. an, " hose n ame is DelInar-sHon.
Alexander Delmar, Director of the Bureau of
ID. C."
The Hon. Alexander Delmar j. President of
the Statistical SOclety; we believe that he is
also the Vice President Secretary, Treasurer,
Librarian and Board of Directors. Altogether,
the Statistical Society is reputed 10 be a curious
institution, and seeing II announced in the In
t>lltsencsr that the s. :. would meet, and be ad-
dressed by its President we dispatched n re-
porter to the City Hall. From the tact that our
reporter Was charged fifty cents admission fee,
the delighted grin with which the colored
janitor received the money gives occasion for
doubt whether il was not the first and only ad-
mission fee yet received.
The Statistical Society rallies in the Criminal
Court ROOM On entering, our reporter found
three male statisticians present, and two ladies
who wore spectacles, and having quite a statis-
ncal appearance. may be set down also as sta
tsucians. In the course of twenty minutes
eight or ten more stausticians dropped in, in
cluding another lady, Miss Josephine GriHing,
President Of the Woman's Rights Association.
The prisoners dock was occupied by an old
gentleman, who sat mufhed up In his overcoat.
and mad a very comfortable nap during the
lecture, turning his pack, we regret to say,
towards the honorable lecturer. The we'll
known seat of Mr.. Middleton, Clerk of the
Court, was occupied by Prot. Wilcox, Of Mr..
Delmar's Statistical Stuff, a spectacled gentle-
man. quite statistical in style and manner. The
statistical business must be bad for the nerves
Prof Wilcox is an amazingly fidgety sort of
body. He came in with a lady, this lady he
introduced TO another lady, then he got a seat
for his lady, then he took OF his overcoat
looked in the sleeves of his overcoat, held
oyereoat down, took off his hat, looked
A. his hat in statistical sort Of
way, then placed his hat and oyercoat on the
iron register, contemplated them on the iron
register, shook his head, removed them to a
chair. contemplated them in the char, shook
MS head, then removed them 10 a corner be-
hind the clerks desk, where he allowed them
10 remain. Then he proceeded TO the lecturers
desk, arranged ii, Contemplated the arrange
ments with a dissatisfied air, rparranged il
then came down to Mr.. Middleton's seat,
squared himself towards the audience, then
towards the Hon. A. d., then espying our re-
porter he approached him, and taking the ada
cent char seated himself on our reporters new
silk hat, which our reporter had paid six dol
lars for, and which he hastened to rescue and
only succeeded after q strenuous pull and thea
in a mashed and ruined condition. Prof W.
without making any apology for MASKING on
reporters new hat, proceeded 10 inquire.
was, The STAR"
The Professor then said: TELL your peopla
lhey have put their foot into ii by pitching into
Mr.. Demar." Our reporter remarked, aAh in
deedr "fes, SIR, said the Professor, ..you
nave charged Mr.. Delmar with things which
wrote myself" Our reporter made answer
$50 much the worse for you;- and inquired
the gentieman's name. To this the Pro-
lessor replied: professor Wilcox, of the So
c,dI Sctenee RerteU. i stop at the Emp,re
House note will reach me there Our
reporter responded, that he was not aware
that any person connected with the STAR
was anxious 10 address note T. Prof Wilcox
Al the Empire House, and that the authorship
OF the statistical matter referred 10 land which
reneeted no credit on anybody was claimed by
hr. Delmar in the pamphlet referred TO
Prof Wilcox looked AT our reporter with a
dissatisfied expression of countenance, rubbed
ms nose IN an abstracted Stats teal sort of way
and presently meandered OF again TO Mr.. Mid
Meantime the President CHon. A. Delrrar,.
VINO was seated approximately near the centre
OF Judge Cartter's ample chair, stroked his
beard and waited patiently for an audience.
Behind him was blackboard, and on the
desk before him was placed a large green bot
lie, and by II two glass tubes connected by n
rubber pipe, the whole arrangement presenting
the appearance Of some complicated chemical
apparatus. 1t vas surmised that this concern
was some ingenious machine for the propaga-
uon OF statls, lies, and that IL would play q con.
spieuous part in the lecture, but the Speaker
made no allusion to il whatever during he
evening. Ats O'Clock, sixteen persons includ.
ing our reporter, white boy and the colored
doorkeeper, were present, and Prof DeImar
entered upon his lecture. 1t was an exceed.
ingiy scattery AFFAIR, and the lecturer was con-
unually living OF at a tangent from his i'm
mediate Sub1pcr the oldest
imaginable II may interest those inclined to
hero-worship to know that the President OF the
Statisneal Society and Director of the Bureau
oearlng tsat name is about five feet four in
cnes IN height, weighs about one hundred
pounds Is of dark compile xlon, full beard and
heayy eyebrows, which meet on the forehead
owing 10 the elevation of thejudge's desx and the
short range N which his audience of sixteen
mad clustered in the vicinity of the bench IL was
NOT easy for the Lecturer TO make himself visible:
out ne got over the difficulty by rising on tip.
toe at the most emphatic passages which oc
CURED quite frequently.
The subject of the lecture was announced TO
be "Iaxaron-" He commenced by saving that
the confusion of tongues since the building Of
The tower Of BABEL was thou ght by many to be
punishment 10 the people, but he regarded IT
2s blessing. The identity of our language
with that of Great Britain had kept our noses
10 the grindstone; the knife with which we
were 10 cut loose from Great Britain had not
yel oeeh sharpened. Physiology taught per-
sons that the milk which q child consumed
~eLt 10 make up the physical and even the
mental lie. 1t was carefully enloined upon
all 20 let children nurse their own mothers: the
system OF wet nurses was TO be deprecated
We had an internal reyenae system which saws
10 the dlstiller yon have manufactured eleven
gallons OF whisky, now give me ten and you
can Keep Uhe other one for Yourself but You
must De- honest. don't pay me in goods, prefer
money, and II convenient don mix any One
thing more, you must be watched Your sin
must be guarded. You must be branded NOT
tTdadted- Laughter by Prof. wilcox1 You
must De sworn and re-sworn; this is what the
law says, and II further saws, Il will coneoct
some new regulations, and have several new
volumes written for your government: pay this
Tax now see how L make you good citizen
Charles Dickens, II was well known, is doing
all IN his power 10 have an International Copy
right law passed. IL would Be a great thing if
accomplished From 1866 10 the present time
the world had been ruled by Adam Smith. As
general thing man gets about what he is
worm. All this arises from mutual COM
peunon- The maxim Of Adam Smith that
taxation should fall equally upon all men
was good enough in England. but not
good here. Adam Smiths four maxims were
incomplete, and are unsuitable TO this country
They did not provide against: 1. Abuse OF tax
power , distorted plan Of taxation; 3. Sud-
den or snap tax legislation;i 4. Indefinite or un-
certain taxes; 5. Over taxation; 6. Undue or
partial taxation; :. UneeonOmical taxes: & So
called moral and "pereeptive" taxation. In
1864, when the tax on whisky was raised from
20 10 90 cents per gallon, there was enough
whisky which paid the lower tax TO last the
country for eighteen months Again. when the