The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1868-02-21
NASBY.

I
Bascom's Trouble and how he got
oat oft.
PosT OFFS, CoNFEDRIT Y Roads,
(Wich is in the State NV KY,
February /, 1868.
A few days ago Bascom come into
the offs, where l wuz bizzy attendin
to the biznis Nv the Yoonitid States
NV Ameriky, smokin cigar and
drinkin hot punch out NV tin dip
per in which 1 compound the article,
and remarkt that he thought it wuz
about time the Corners spoke.
"Onto wat pertikeler subjeck wood
700 hev the Corners speek, my cher
ub ?" sed I "The Corners hez exer-
cised her throat onto almost every
thing up to date.
"Troo," sed G. W., "but there's
one subjeck onto wich the Corners
hezn't sed her say, namely, the
crushin waite NV taxashen, and the
question NV payin the bonds in green
bax."
That's probably becoz," remarkt
I, "the Corners pays nary tax; and
becoz, also, not hevin any bonds nor
any greenbax, she don't care, to
speek after the manner Nv Een, a
d-n about it. Isn't that the case -
Probably it is, hut at the same
time, We ought TO extend a helpin
hand to our brethren North, who are
maxim a valyent fite on this thing
Parson, we must hold a meetin on
this question, and resolve"
Willin to accommodate Bascom, /
called the meetin, and last mite it took
place. 1t wuz an enthusiastic gath
rim, ez the meetins at the Corners,
wich l report, alluz are. Skasely had
the horn footed afore the church wuz
filed. 1t wuz curiosity wich brot
EN-. None NV EN- but Bascom, Capt.
McPelter and myself, knowed wat a
bond wuz, and they wantid to find
out. / was called upon to state the
objeck NV the gathrin. Iopened with
a movin appeal to the people vino
WIZ groanin under load NV taxa
shen, for the benefit NV the lordly
bond holders NV the country; whose
very life blood wuz bein sucked out
NV em by the bond-aristocrats NV the
country.
At this pint Joe Bigler, who wuz
NV course in the aujence, commenst
weepin pcrfoosely, but disgustinly
loud. He fairly bellered, and dis
played altogether too much emoshun.
"Mr. Bigler" sed 1 "woodent a
little less violent sorrer anser ?"
"Parsont" sed he "never hevin
paid cussid cent NV taxes in my
life, never knowd afore, how much
| wuz being oppressed. But I'll con-
tame myself if kin. I'll cork up my
woes if they bust me.
then went on to explane the Pen
dleton ijee. First the Government
owes about four hundred thousand
millions NV dollars, more or less,
wich it borrowed. The Abolishn
lice is to pay this of ez it falls due,
in gold, and in the meantime to pay
interest onto the bonds ez per agree
ment ON the face Nv EN-. But this is
oppressive. This payin interest is
watts eatin us up. Therefore Pen
dleton proposes to pay these bonds
by ishoCin four hundred thousand
million Nv greenbaxs. When these
tgreenbax wear out so that they amt
passable no more-so that Bascom
won't take EN- for drinks, for in
stance,-why, then well print more
greenbax and give em new ones
don't see that the debts paid of any
but We git out Nv the intrest- we
ishoo q non bearln intrest note wich
the greenback is, for an intrest bear.
in note wich the present bond is, and
compel the bond holders to take EN-,
thus room US, the tax payers, by the
weight NV taxashen we are now COM.
pelled to carry. This ijee is not,
however, original with Pendleton.-
He's bin steelin nay thunder. / he'd
subsisted many yeers in Moo Jersey
and elsewhere by the same expedient.
Whenever / owed man l gave MIN
my note and felt that great load wuz
off my mind. When it became doc,
eff it made the creditor eny esier in
his mind, took it up by givin him
another, and so on, pervided he wuz
willin and he'd faith enuff to pay for
the stamps. 1t wuz an easy and SIM
pie method NV gittin on In the world
without onpleasantnis.
Capt. McPelter, late NV the Con-
fedrit army, wantid to know eff the
greenhack wuz good enuff for the
soljer. eff it wuzn't good enuff tor the
bondholder
Bascom endorsed all that he'd bin
sed, and demanded resolooshens,
moovin ones, wich lie presentid, and
they wuz passed.
At this pint, occurred suthin wich
wpzen't down in the bill. Skasely
he'd the resolooshens passed, when
Joe Bigler stepped forward and re-
markt that he he'd votid for them
resolooshens becoz he believed in EN-.
But he wantid the ijec carried fOrerd
to its logical conclooshen. He owed
Bascom eighty odd dollars, wich wuz
bearin interest, and he'd bin for some
time, and wood, probably, for some
time to come. Now, what is justis
in governmental matters, is ekally
so in privit life. He demanded Nv
Bascom that note, and that he accept
in its stead one wich bore no interest.
He he'd borne this burden too long,
and it wuz high time that he be re-
leeved.
Deekin Pogram felt that he must
agree with Mr.. Bigler. Bascom held
his note for S490, wich he'd bin run.
min on intrest for a long time, and
he felt that he coodeD't stand it no.
"Why, blarst yer eyes," sez Bas.
com, 81 lent yoo that money to save
yer farm from bein sold out from un.
der yer feet /"