Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1868-03-06

| On the political variants that can b
smoked outY" Mr.. Peter Cooper, tha
was in the paint, glue and isiuglass trade
is he a special orgensral partner to fur
nish all the paint and putty and glue tina
will be required 10 cover up and hold NJ
the Graut platform3 II 50, il is a BIZ
thing. Isinglass and all other trans
parent substances will be useless. Th'
people see their way through il now. Mr.
Chittenden is lovely character, and
suppose he is to be the head Of "the re-
ligious department" Ahi j learned Il
know and appreciate him during the wal
in dealing in tracts, blankets, contracts
and all other kinds Of tracts towards 10y
atty and all the treasury.
The combination grows on me az
read the name Of Mr.. Vanderbilt; il de-
notes pluck, speed and bottom. The
very thought Of him and Grant, hitched
double on the great national track
makes fellow feel heroish, and be will
ling to bet that they would make the
fastest time over poor peoples children,
and their written constitutions, that W,
ever hal in this country; they voult
shower down the oats, and no patrio
would dare utter a neigh as long as W,
had "stable government" With Mr.
Bonner's influence, the thing would pre-
sent completeness doubtless ever
never contemplated by Washington him
self. The very sight OF Mr.. Harper 8
name was refreshing to my eyes, as my
memory was full of the sound law, NOR.
ais and pictures Of his publications.
The Magazine, Weekly and Ba-
Ear-and often regretted that Con-
gress had not made an appropriation for
their introduction into the colored uni.
versities. The absence of the name Of
Mr.. Bennett, of the Herald, is to be re-
gretted, as its bare use would have added
an element of public regard not always
attainable. Would it not have been we'll
to have added the names Of the proprie-
tors of Sozodont, Night Blooming
Cereus," Balm of a Thousand Flowers"
Barnum and the sewing machine man2
1t seems unkind to touch the artistic pile
that you have all created with q labor Of
love aud faith, derived either from the
Bible or the Treasury Department, a
kind of millennium faith, where all ma
tions, kindreds and tongues dwell
together and gather in harmony. When
one scans the list of the lean Democrats,
fat loyalists and stock fossils, his mind
can but revert to the prairie scenes,
where none but Providence, the Indians
and nature rules, and he thinks of the
prairie dogs and their holes, and all the
yarmints and reptiles that therein dwell
in peace as profound as lovely, scene
truly edifying to one of large Christian
faith. mq
You will, l trust, pardon the liberty !
take here, and now, in expressing a per-
sonal regret that the name of that
august vegetarian squash philosopher,
Mr., Greeley, does not appear on the list.
We shall need blood out of turnips and
all other green things in the canvass.
By the way, speaking of blood brings to
mind our friend, the redoubtable Ryn-
ders. You have neglected him, game,
good fellow, who never struck out oftime'
or "below the belt" / quote the personal
part of your appeal, and regard it as ad-
dressed to myself: Z" Your position in
the community where you reside will en-
able you to shape, if not lead, public
opinion. Yet further, You will at
once issue a call for public meeting"
So, after an early breakfast, / go at once
to see my brother, Israel Funk, the to-
bacconist, and, to my surprise, find him in
great rage, reading your printed letter a
duplicate of mine addressed to him. He
won't bulge a peg-swears that he is
badly bitten now with the " Grant brand"
in tobacco and cigars All ofthat brand |
have plenty of grit and smoke, but no fa-
vor. Greenhorns and boys buy at once, !
and then drop that brand. He was down \
on it-real savage. What could man
do, then, when his own brother was !
against him, in getting up public meet
ing, but 20 and see Mr.. Washburn, and
lay all my plans before him. He listened
with both ears until | named about the
public meeting, with the Grand Grant /,
Head Centre to talk out in public; !
says "it won't do at all for any public |
man to talk all his wind out before o
long race, but he must keep it in him to
make time coming down the quarter
stretch in the last heat on the four mile
day." says Grant acts, don't talk John.
son talks, don't act, and has got down
from thoroughbred to running quarter.
races, with Mr.. Seward for his rider and
Jockey, and takes the spurs like 10 Cones
toga wagon horse" do not see what
can do but await your instruction. You
know am disposed to oblige you. You
are so very kind, affectionate, and libe-
raj to all your friends, employees, and
servants, that your will is their law, and
hey would never dream of disobeying at
,he prerent price Of board.
TERMS: PROMPT CASH; sic per
:ent off, G. O.D.
| neglected to mention q very small,
rival circumstance that may be in the
way of our new "Grant Department"
N the dry goods trade. We did not kill
Ill the Democrats and rebels, and they
law millinery, vegetarian, shoe and
Grant department, or anything of that
Iind, added to the trade, may do, but
Vhen it comes to selecting their officers,
he descendants Of the old stock intend
o select and name their man, not yours.
Mrs. Funk desires you to send her
ome calicoes or other prints for drapery
It the public meeting (if ordered, } repre-
enting the scene at the War Office
vhen General Grant surrendered to Mr..
stanton. Please don't mark the bill for
he calicoes- +
"TERMs: PROMPT CASH, SIR per
eHt off, c. o. D."
Is / said before il makes me feel
Patrioticslly-well, yes PETER FUNK.
P. S. Mrs. F. directs me 10 present her
and says that she always
hought you were the hsndsomest man
4 your age in New York, aud she regrets
o learn that you are getting roundshoul-
Iered, and desires to know il it arises
rom having the weight Of the nation 10
ear, or is it occasioned from habit Of
'utting your hand down deep into your
reeohes pockets TO pull up money for
be poor or will it not make q man