The Van Buren press., 1868-11-24
NO,24s
4 n : = =
Morality ami Huckleberries.


morality and huckleberries hourished -
they do here. | do not know which has
the ascendancy Possibly the huckleber-
rics, in their season, but the morality
holds out the longest. The huckleber-
rios aso in season now. They are new
beverage to me. This is my first ac-
quainlance with them, and certainly 10
pleasant one They are excellent
had always thought hueklcberry was
something like a tunip. On the contra
ry,. they are no larger than buckshot.
They are better than buckshot, though,
and more digcstiblc. The farmers boys
and girls In the mountains near here turn
out in their full strength at this season
of the year, and devote their whole talents
10 the gathering Of huckleLerries. They
bring them to town aud sell them for hf
|teen cents quart This isnota sudden
asd violent means Of acquiring wealth
| spoke just now of the mountains near
here, and il had done it on my own re-
sponsibility would apologize--but get
tie tsrm from the public-they call them
mountains, and I think they do It with.
a delihefate intent to deceive think 50
because these mountains are not six hun
bred feet high. There is an amount Of
ain in this world that Q man could hardly
conceive 81, Who had never been in It.
Bit the morality Of this locality is some
thing marvelous,I have 'only heard ono
mau swear and seen only one man drunk
in the ten days that i have been hero
And the same man that did the swearing
was The man that contained the drink. 1t
! WIS after midnight. Everybody else was
ia belt--o.hcrwise they would have
hanged him. no d0ubt d This sample
gives you, the complexion Of male NOR
atty. in Hartford. Young ladies' walk
thAse strec.s alone, as late as ten o'clock
at night, and are not insultcBl That Is a
| specimen OF both male and female moral
lily, apd of good eIylsr.oiI meet young
ladies marching cheerftllly along in the
Iloneliest places, in the obscurlty OF the
night, and the added darkness OF the
sombre shadows of the trces--but ldont
dare to speak to them. Ishould be scalp-'l
ed, sure, see the whole female element,
of the community apparently hundreds
and hundreds of pretty girls marching
arm IN arm -t,irn out about eight o'clock
! in the evening. and swarm back and forth
through Main street with happy cfFron.
terp that Is in the. last degree entertain
Ing, u stranger. What would you think
Of respectable young girls marching back
and forth stnight and unattended, from
the head OF Montgomery street to The !
top Of the hill, ar from the yhorves Of;
lthq city front half way to the Mission J,
\ san, Dolores 1t Is said that ladies' o. |,
Itha tiia!test respectfully 90 freely TO
Ic,tstes shliconccrts at night in this city
slofi 10000 ssouls, without other escort
! sliaaa le l.isas 81 lheirov aex We may
| expect the lion aud the lamb 10 lie down
+, together shortly in Connecticut, IL it DO
constitutional FOR the millennium TO como
Ia small doses 10 me, q sinner, the
! prospect is anything bat inviting ri bees
L Two or three, of the charches here have
massive steeples-or what were original.
lly inlende,l 70 be steeplcs-run up few
| feet above the roof and then chopped
SQUARE off The natives call them "stump-
talk These churches .wotild be cxceed-
! inglyI attrpctiyei ediices If they we're fin
ished, but in their present condition they
arc the saldest looking affairs that you
can imagine a departed Christian must
feed absurd euough, reporting himselfi In
/ Paradise from a stump-tail church, But
i suppose the people go on the principle
i. OF not standing on small matters 50 they
iget to Paradise-getting there being the
u,ain thing II such be the case, they
are something like tho, Minister OF the
! Navy of one OF those one-horse Central
American, reppblics--a republic with .
. hundred thousand inhabitants, grand OF,
ifeials cnongll for 4 hundred millions an
G amya Of five hundred rag mullins. and
''nayy'b con sisting OF one solitary six
" ton schooner. In Panama ! heard =
/ icgend in this. connection. There was
war in one those OF those little republics
\ Tho one l have been describing. The
Cscncrll in Chief asked the President for
three hundred men the President ORDER
4 ed the Minister of War to furnish them
the forces-jnst. the number wanted
,Iwete down on the coast somewhere; the
a DlifiNlci VI w III iSvuSSbcb NhV A"'"'osSA
OF the Navy to place the navy of the re-
lfbub.ie at tie disposal Of the troops, 30
that they might have transportation to
: the seat OF war; the Minister ofthes Navy
IA lan'ollitial who had seen as little or ships
, and oceans AZ even Ny Secretary welles)
sents rourier to where the schooner was,
: With the necessary order for the Lord
High Admiral, The Lord High Admiral
| wrote back: .s,,1 ,,..,.t..,..
! dYour Excellency: II is impossible
\ You must be aware that thisisa sixty.ton
schooner. There Is notroom for three
hundred men in her" to ~ HR d
= The stern old salt in the navy Office
!. wrote back.
1 "Impossiblc--Non scnse. Make room.
! plleave the tons overheard and bring the
,soldiers.io3fut znt bta ied' ra ten D
ANY way to get them there 50. thay, get
them there, was all this brave sea; horss
cared for. MARK TWAIN
y f.y- From what did the oli,fashioned
!, orsepistol' derive its ZANE? From it,
" habit OF kicking ad' bps N slidgq
.ap{,yi --syss,. -s>s s-4---4,-tr- sealssh
a That was smart girl who cousos'