The New Orleans crescent. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1866-1869, 1868-05-31
sHEADn UNDERTAKEs TO KEEP a
HOTEL.
CRY HOTEL. N. O.. Nav 20. 1869.


nevertheless thought could keep a hotel" SO ]
hired the one above named for one day, and tried
my hand at it. l am not keeping any hotel any
more it isn't my forte edzactly. / think | can
do better at newspaper writing, or picking up
chips in ship yard, or securing knives and forks
However Illuminating the confession may be.
will tell you of some of my experience during the
day and night undertook to run a hotel.
arose early in the morning, put on my Sun
day-go-to.meeting clothes, span new billed white
shirt with frills, my diamond pin which bought
of "the original Jacobs" new scarf with all the
colors of the rainbow, and boots that reflected my
face. In this garb l went behind the counter.
Up stepped man to register. and l let him put
his name down. I asked him if he had any bag.
gage, and he said 81 should think so. you milk
sop" He pointed to trunk which it took two
porters to carry PIP stairs. 1 ascertained after.
wards that he stayed two weeks in the hotel OF
that trunk, and then left. The trunk was sold at
auction, and was found full of bricks and eight
wood" But obeyed the Bible injunction "He
was a stranger and took him in"
That amt all. He took me in
The next that came to get a room was q colored
member Of the legislature. | told him we Kept a
white mans hotel and couldn't accommodate him.
he got indignant, and asked me eff | went back
on the Constitution which guaranteed equal rights
to ALL" told him / had never read it, He opened
his carpet bag, took out a bound copy Of the
same and told me to refuse him room if deed
dared. and he went to U. s. Commissioner shan
non right of. Rather than she'd the blood OF
man with whom had fought, bled and dyed Tor
my country, and to have my license revoked,
was obliged to give the colored gentleTpSn room,
/" all of which is respectfully submii,ed; me re-
suit was row, in which half Of my olo ooarders
refused longer to eat hash IL hy mousse, no matte
how fine had il chewea ap.
Then come anothey who was dissatisfied with his
room. So runs the pen several umes, when up
ter and or bell boys. / told them to remove
job Smiths baggage from 60 to 81.
They did il.
Mark the result, as Iperseed.
Bye and bye came man who registered Sam1
Jones and lady. / put SAN" in l04 and
LADY in so. Evening came, and was con-
graduating myself on being able TO keep a hotel.
All Of q sudden there was jerk of the bell of
the private parlor, and | sent the call boy" to
find tout what was the matter. Pretty soon he
came back, looking very red in the face, and said
as how there was two ladies as wanted to see
me in there" FA
went in the "P. p" and found-2 women en-
diSadbiHe, as we creoles say, and walking the
floor and crying like mad. As quick as | went in
they both went for me, and begun:
You're smart man, amt you, to 90 and put
strange man in my room What do you mean,
sir?"
l begun to be frightened, and stammered,
u-ulu put q uldu III your
"Yes, you did, sr?n
"what is the number of your room, madam u
"s7, you wretch "
II was true. l had done been and gone and
done it. / had ordered John Smiths baggage
from 65 to 81. and he had come and gone into this
room when it was occupied by young lady to
whom he had never been introduced O.,
Hesvingsl
Then up come the other one, with her pocket
handkerchief wet through, and began on me
and hara L sr.a ILL., l..
myself, and exposed to all the dangers of large
city, while my husband is separated from me,
and putt don't know where Boo-h0o-hOo !
o, you good.for nothing, heartless creature !"
Here was q nice box for a nice young man.
There stood one young woman crying like thun-
der because there ,edS a man in her room, and
right beside her, another, crying because there
trdsnf What was fellow to do / rushed
for the office, and sung out through the speak.
ing tube for the chamber maid to put in order
No. ia for the young miss who had the strange
man in her room.
thought was all right now, sure but pretty
soon there was another jerk at the p. p. bell.
had sung out through the wrong speaking tube.
Instead of calling TO the chamber maid on the
ladies' side, called the chamber paid on the
gents side ! The result was, that the young lady
left tie hotel in disgust, or in a cab, forget
which!
The other lady, who had been married and lost
her husband in another room, complained to him,
as soon as she found him, and he come to pay me
q visit at the Office.
"Wby didn't you put me in a room with my
wife, sir! Do you keep Quaker housed"
began to quake. why didn't you put her
down as your wife," said /.
I" / did, sir" said be.
Ireferred in triumph 10 the register. "There
II is, you see, Samuel Jones and lddyi II don't
say anything about her being your wife. | keep
a respectable house."
He looked at me one moment, with scorn de-
pictured his FOQntanQnpa called for hia hill
and left in the first omnibus without paying it.
knew he was friend of mine by remark he
made, as he was about leaving. No matter what
he said.
got in huff. rung for the porter. and runc
SO many times it brought the cook. | wanted the
watchman but called the chambermaid. / sent
baggage up Red River that ought TO have gone TO
Mobile, and sent the owner Of it off on the Jack
son Railroad got the baggage out of a lsdys
room and sent il off with Texan to Galveston,
and when he got there, he had nothing but an ex.
ira bonnet, hoop skirt, two sets iof corsets aud
some - for a change That Texan threatens
to lasso me, the next time he catches me.
In the evening, among other guests at tea, was
raw Freedman, who could not speak English.
He wanted waiter to bring him something, and
so he sung out " GdrcOn, gdrcOn ?" and
beckoned with his finger. The waiter came up,
and he repeated it," gdrcOn ~ The waiter who
was of noble birth from Limerick), looked up at
the gas-light and exclaimed, Indignantly, There's
gars on now; what dye want OF any more CARS
on?n
The Frenchman "didnt see it in that light"
OF course he appealed TO me, and as / talk
French fuidly lhaving learned il in the French
market), explained to him that my walters did
not not understand French, but they were some
on Greek The Frenchmsn thought referred
to Greek fire and that my walters were all
Fenians, and so he left without paying his bill.
begun 10 get furious, and as | didn't care to
attack anybody bigger than was, | commenced
on my boy Sidney, and threw all the blame on
him. But my guests were so uncharitable and
mean as TO say that " didn't know my business -
and better 60 to Algiers and 60 to settin' hens
for livin'," or drivin' geese to water,n and all
such unehivaric suggestions. When | went
through the pantry, and the stewards room and
the kitchen and other places the fellahs sung out
TO me TO pay my fOotin', b" until | had a notion
of footin' every one of ,em. .,-.s..-.- $3.50.
Then, somebody stole the key TO the wine
room, and everybody got drunk. The chamber
maids got on :" strike" and the bar-keepers
got on q strike, too. and struck out from the
shoulder" A man from the country, who occu-
pied one Of the rooms, blew his gas out and died
on my hands without cent 10 bury him with. A
slop-bucket was tipped over up stairs, and the
dirty water from bath tubs and wash bowls came
trckliDg down on 20 the chignOn Of a belle who
was playing " Champagne Charlie " on the piano
IL. - ~ II. H.