The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1868-06-30
rl4l: Etiquette OF aIARRIAaE.
A Freuen, CourtshIp and SSeadIng-
How the ssLitEle Arrange
rmenl" IL Effected.

TIE following account OF the French
etiquette of conrtship and marriage Ii
taken from the June numberzEof tint
BeLgTdUiG;
l We will suppose that NJ. Horace De
| launay has seen MRdemoiselle Rosalt'
Duboiss or that she has been spoken o
1 to him, and that on inquiry as TO he!
4 position, etc., he finds she ts person
whom he would like TO marry. He il
| bound to observe a rigorous compll
\ ance with inexorable rules, the viola
/ ton of any of which would be proba-
bly, the ruin of all his hopes. EHqttet
| has nothing to say about the affections
but simply, like treatise. onstratesici
and tactics, lays down certain methods
| of proceeding, without considering tbs
cause of action. sd, t,v
THE FIRST STEP.
The first step which NJ. .Delaunay OF
| his parents must take for him Is to ash
a mutual friend to inquire of the fami'
I;lY of the young lady If his offer Of
marriage will be agreeable. It is abso'
lutely contrary to all good breeding fol
NJ. Delaunay to do this himself, and II
he is refused, good breeding requires
him TO make no sign of disaPpoint'
ment, but to remain with the family
IDrecfsement sltr le meme Pied Just on
The same footing as before. 1t will be
comprehended that all alIuslon 10 the
refusal would be of the worst of tastesi
ttCi1L plus aIn2tpotS goat"
But suppose NJ. DelauDay has no
common friend. In this case he must
ish of the family, If they are Catholics
Ito the pGSteHl, II they are Protestants
Ito the rabbi, If they are Jewish-and
solicit one OF these to make the in
quiry.
II he prefers it, he may go to the
family lawyer; and, indeed, II the lady
ia an elderly person or widow this is
this preliminary. But in any case he
must get a suitable introduction to
cure, pd8teItT, rabbi or notary.
If Inc reply be favorable, NJ. Delaun.
ney asks for permission to visit the
family, or he asks TO be. introduced, II
he has not been SO already. sggr
I he first visit must take place with
ont the presence OF The young lady,
and all the afairs OF property, settle
ment, &C., are then discussed. The
family are supposed already to be in
formed of all details about the position
of 81. Delaunayj by his intermediary;
the parents or guardians are now sup
posed to put further questions TO the
young man, and to declare whether the
replies are satisfactory or not, and to
communicate on their side all details
about the young lady's fortune and ex.
pectations. The young man Is Invited
to visit them on future day, and the
day and hour of the visit are fixed. IF
the replies of NJ. Delaunay are not
found satisfactory, the young Iady's
representatives require time for rettec.
ton, and they separate on the most
cordial terms possible, and the
suitor is required by good breeding
not to make any further advances un-
less he is recalled. F-s3 30 s-.
THE FIRsTV VISIT.
However, suppose NJ. Delaunay has
satisfied the exigencies of father, tnoth-
er, guardian, notary, &C., and the honr
of the first visit Is arranged IN which he
Is to see the object of his marriage in
tentions for the first time as a Bultor.
The visit must naturally be arranged
to take place when no other visitors are
expected. Good taste requires totlettes
on both sides to be carefully proper,
although any display-Ittle toilette Ia
Da0eatse-is Of the worst taste; the
Young lady especially must be simply
but neatly alfred. Madamoiselle Du-
bois, having already been informed OF
the proposal, sits between her parents,
and no allusion whatever is made to the
subject of NJ. Delaunay's visit during
the first interview Tits, In fact, sim
pie visit of reconnaissance; the enemies
are placed in presence of and examine
80
different things In the world. II, how
ever, either on the occasion of the first
visit or of the second, NJ. Delaunay is
not satisfied with the eXplanat lions CIV
en- HIM, or the appearance of Made
moiselle Dubois, he can still retreat
conveniently by writing to say that
little Journey, which he Is obliged to
take, will deprive him for some time OF
the pleasure he anticipated,in being
a BILE to continue his visits, etc. II, on
the contrary, he desires to go on with
the negotiation, he must make for
NAL demand, by his father, mother, or
other relative or frtendI 10 be admitted
into the family under the title OF pre-
EeRdN. s7-s n
1.-THE request Is accepted, NJ. Delau-
nay ought immediatelyito write a note
| to the parents to ask when tt viii be
agreeable for them to receive his visit
| Of acknowledgment and thanksf and
when this interview takes place, Made
moiselle Dubois, having been duly In
formed OF the present condition of the
proceedings, VIII, after the proper com
pliments have passed. on both sides, be
sent for; and the young man Is. pre-
scented to her as her fntnre husband.
5.5. THE couRrsH1P. e n ~
From this time NJ. Delaney Is re-
ceiYed In the house on intimate but not
familiar terms, with respect 10 which
there is a wide Distinction. NJ. Delau.
may Is required, for example, always
TO come with toilette suitable for 8
visit OF ceremony, and the young lady
on her part too must observe a, similar
carefulness. NJ. Delaunay is expected
Of course, to pay frequent visits to the
house, but always In ceremonious form
and he should announce his intention
!iof coming by sending in the morning
q boquet to his betrothed; whom In
deed he will never see alone until the
marriage is finally celebrated before
the IIaiTs and IN the church: for mar
rage contracts are such Rlippery al
fairs that NJ. Delaunay and Mad
lemoislIe Dubois may have gone
through all these forms to no purpose
N. DelaunRy should wish to retire al
any moment, he cab. do so by writing
the little billet and announcing e Pettl
0oyGge; and the family of the young La
dy could cover her retreat by any
equally simple device and to prevent
Iall unpleasant consequences, and al
chance of tnalevolent tittle-tattIe, thC
whole AFFAIR should be kept q strict Sc
tcrekon both sides till the marriageoo con
tract Is finally signed. y And, moreover
the young people will never either
Espeak to or OF each other by their una
ldorned Christian names they M uss ad
dress each other and speak of each 9th
err always as Monsieur Horace and
lAlademoiselIe Rosalie. Butswhen tbs
contraet1iS signed, and the marriage
formally announced,Tt 1.-The figors of Ell
lQltette mayrelaxin some measure to
i wards, tka young couple; but as res
poets the family, it Iincreases, for! fh'