Bloomsburg democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1867-1869, 1868-08-12
All Sorts Of Items,

All Sorts Of Items.
How to make rich jam-Crowd twenty
fashionable ladies into one omnibus.
"A stick on the stage is bad enough, but
a stick in tumblcr is worse. 1t also adds
to the number of tumblcrs.
old Thad has written another letter, in
which he calls the Radicals "fools and
swindlers." Happy family!
Theodore Tilton is writing novel, and
Butler is to be the heavy villain, and Gree.
ley the low comedian of the book.
Josh Billings says that he will never
patronize a lottery so long as he can hire
anybody else to rob him at reasonable wages
Miss Anna Dickinson's new lecture is
on "Children and Marriage" Grants In
dian baby record in California is to form one
of the principal illustrations.
ladies who display most OF their beauty
at the crossings may, in one view. have q
good understanding and may foot up well,
but they rarely amount to anything more
than fgure-heads.
The RAIDS find fault with Wade Hamp.
ton, Forrest, and others, because they arc
ex-rebels and Democrats. How about Jack
Hamilton and Joe Brown, the latter tho
founder and defender Of Anderson,ille?
"A truly loyal gentleman, canvassing a
railroad train in Wisconsin, found one so1i-
tary voter for Grant. Naturally they fra
ternized, and at the end of the route the
canvasser missed his pocket book.
"A boy eight years old, in one of our
public schools, having been told that rep.
tile ''is an animal that creeps," on being
asked to name one on examination day,
promptly and triumphantly replied, "a
baby!'
The loyalists met with heavy loss in
Texas. A negro riot recently occurred at
Milligan, that State, which resulted in the
death of twelve 'pet lambs" and the serious
woundipg Of an equal number. This will
be serious loss to the Grant forces.
"A negro before the police court at Lou
isvillc, on charge Of stealing, rather took
down the concern by remarking, as he was
marched to Jail: "If they don't let mig
ger steal little in dis damn country, Use
gwine back to Tennessee, where Massa
Brownlow'll see niger gifts his rights"
BY prize strawberry mark on his left
arm, Horace Greeley has just discovered
that Forney is his long-lost brother. They
will henceforth divide the pleasant task of
proving that Gov. Seymour sympathized
with the rebellion, and lived for three weeks,
in 1863, on roasted negro babies.
"A Scotch old maid, who was asked to
subscribe to raise men for the king duing
the Peninsular war, answered:
Indeed, I'll do no such thing; I never
could raise man for myself and I'm not
going to raise men for King George!" -
Anna Dickinson says Gen. Grant has a
family record as we'll as military rec
ord" among the Indians of California. He
carried on his operations on "peace foot
ing" and left the Indian maiden singing,
"The Captain with his whiskers." Gay de-
ceiver!
"A Mrs. Wade, of Dayton, Ohio, about
one year ago presented her husband 18th
three heavy, bouncing babies. Last week
she again honored him with two Of the same
sort. Five children inside of one year may
please Mr.. Wade, but most other folks
would not relish the joke.
"A gentleman in Albany was recently
arrested for following lady on the street.
He claimed that man had right to ad-
mire lady, let him meet her where he
might. The court and the lady herself
agreed to this, and the gentleman was dis
charged.
AN exchange says, that hen has Gu
pacity Of laying six hundred eggs and no
more. As most Of these are laid during
the first four years of her life, it is thought
by many farmers to be economy to cut off
her head when she is four years old and sell
her to boarding house keeper for o spring
chicken.
IT isn't what people cat, but what is d.
gested, that gives strength and flesh; it
isn't what people say, but what thcy mean,
that determines acts; it isn't the color Of
the sky, but the direction Of the wind, that
shows what the weather is to be; It isn't
what is on lady's face, but what is in her
heart, that indicates her nature.