Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1868-03-25
A Humorous Version of the
ReasOnsWhya a woman Can
not be made a Mason.

At the late anniversary celebration
of the Masons of Austin, Nevada, the
orator of the day thus discussed the
question "Why cannot a Woman be
made a Masoni" 1t has the merit oi
novelty at least. The speaker said:
woman sometimes complains that
she is not permitted to enter our lodges
and work with the craft in their labors,
and leara all there is TO be learned in
that institution. We learn that, before
the Almighty had finished his work,
he was in some doubt about creating
Eve. The creation of every living
thing had been accomplished, and the
Almighty had made Adam (xho was
the first Mason) and erected for him
the finest Lodge in the world, and
called it Paradise No. |. He caused
all beasts of the field and fowls Of the
air to pass before Adam for him to
name them which was a piece of work
he had to do alone, so that no confu-
sion might thereafter arise from Eve.
whom he knew would make trouble if
she was allowed to participate in it, if
he created her beforehand.
Adam being very much fatigued
with the labors of his first task fell
asleep, and when he awoke he found
Eve in the Lodge with him. Adam
being Senior Warden, plsced Eve as
the pillar of beauty in the south, and
they received their instructions from
the Grand Master in the east, which
when finished, she Immediately called
the Craft from labor to refreshment.-
Instead of attending to the duties Of
her office as she ought, she left her
station, violated her obligations, and
let in an expelled Mason, who had no
business there, and went round with
him, leaving Adam to look after the
Jewels The fellow bad been expelled
from the Grand Lodge, with several
others, some time before. But hearing
the footsteps of the Grand Master, he
suddenly took his leave, telling Eve to
make aprons, as she and Adam were
not in proper regalia. She went and
told Adam, and when the Grand Mas
ter returned to the Lodge he found his
gavel had been stolen.
"He called for the Sen Tor and Junior
Wardens, who had negl ected to guard
the door, and found them absent. Af-
ter some time he came to where they
were hid, and demanded of Adam
what he was doing there, instead of
occupying his official station. Adam
replied they were waiting for Eve to
call the Craft from refreshment to-
labor again, and that the craft was not
properly clothed, which they were max
ing provisions for. Turning to Eve he
asked her what she had to offer in ex
cuse for her unofficial and unmasonic
conduct. She replied that fellow
passing himself off as Grand Lecturer
had been giving her instructions, and
she thought it ought to be no harm TO
learn them. The Grand Master then
asked her what had become of his CAV
ell, she said she didn't know, unless
the fellow had taken it away.
Finding that Eve was no longer
and that she had caused
Adam to neglect his duties, and had let
in one whom he had expelled, the
Grand Master closed the Lodge, and
turning them out, set faithful Tyler
to guard the door with flaming sword.
Adam repenting his folly, went to
work like a man and good Mason, in
order to get reinstated. Not so with !
Eve; she got mad about it and COM
menced raising Cain. Adam, on &C
count of his reformation, was permitted |
10 establish Lodges and work in the
lower degrees; and while Eve was al
lowed to join him in the works of chari-
ty outside, she was never again to be
admitted to assist in the regular work
of the Craft. Hence the reason why
woman cannot become Mason"