The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1868-01-29
A Letter about lInsI.


Your newly-annexed fellow-citizens in
the suburban parts heretofore known as
Church Hill, Union Hill, Shedtown, Slab
town, and Stumptown, are in af1iction and
distress on account of the condition of
their highways, byways, and ways of loco
motion and transportation in general. Tax
alton without representation is national
and distant affair; but taxation without
pavements, without gas, without hydrant
water, without a sufficient police, and with
mud, and slush, and splash, and spatter,
draggled skirts, begrimed shoes, pants
caked with red clay, door mats supersatu-
rated, and passages dirty and distracting
to good housekeepers, comes nearer home,
and is more than they can bear. Mud is
the prominent topic in all that part of the
world. Some people, have brought q
fashion from foreign States of replying to
the question, " How are you2" by saying,
I" Nicely" But it is likely to be exchanged
for muddy; and the tendency is to in
troduce the same word as sort of general
reply to all the ordinary, everyday ques,
tions-as, /" How is your wife ?" Muddy"
/" Your children 7" Muddy" SHOW are
the times "" "Muddy." "Have you read
the proceedings of the Convention on yes
terday 2" "Muddy." "What do you
think of the prospects of the country 2"
" Muddy" "What hopes may the newly
annexed indulge of relief from the Coun-
cil2" "Muddy."
The old proverb, "Look before you
leap" is substituted by Look before you
step"; and instead of mind your eyes" ;"
it is "Mind your feet" Some ladies go
on their toes, and others have adopted q
plan of going on their heels; great many
don't 60 at all, and have not been seen in
the streets for weeks. In some cases fe-
males have become desperate, and are
seen trudging along so carelessly that for
six inches or a foot the moisture, by Ca
pillary attraction, has ascended their
dresses. Of this sort are they, both white
and colored, and their numbers are not
few, who have to wait for hours in the rain
in those wretched throngs where city wood
and Bureau soup and fuel are distributed.
The mud is the least of their troubles.
There is story Of learned judge who
met sprightly market girl going from the
city, and inquired of her, How deep's the
creek, and what's the price Of eggs?" Her
reply was: "Knee-deep, and shilling"
We can imagine many similar questions as
to the depth of mud and prices current
by persons coming into town through the
localities to which we have alluded. "How
deep's the mud " will be on everybody's
lips-from the rough wagner, who breads
another broken trace and smash-up in gene
raj, to the elegant lady who is endeavoring
to decide whether to wear long or short
dress, and how to adjust her attitudes so as
to preserve the harmony between mud
and modesty. Indeed, the public is SO
deeply interested in this matter, that it has
been suggested that the Dispatch should
add another column to its marine re-
port. The useful gentleman who, with
so much patience and perseverance,
tells our citizens when the sun and
moon will rise and set, when the
tides will flow, and how the ships do come
and 60, could, it is said, by daily detour,
on his return from Rockets, take obser-
vations on the several hills and settlements
aforesaid, so as to present the state of
affairs in feet and inches, with the matu-
tinal freshness ofsunrise, in every mornings
paper. He could provide himself with
set of instruments, or strings and leads,
and by rapid inspection could present an
average, with some special notice Of the
worst places. In order to reach the CEN
tire of the latter it might be necessary for
him to have very long pair of mud boots
or small boat; so that he might set up
sticks, with red flags, to serve the pur-
pose of buoys, to keep wagons and car
riages out of these inextricable holes.
We have endeavored to give this impor-
tant matter to the public in all its bear
ings, and to be as transparent in our ac-
count as possible, so that everybody may
understand the nature of the case; but
such is the tendency of the human mind
to describe everything in the color of its
own habitual thoughts, that we shall not
be surprised to hear that some citizen,
among those most deeply interested, has
read our piece, and laid it down with the
disparging remark Z" Oh, yes; yes, you've
made it as clear as-mud."
BLOODY Run ALIAS MUDDY Run.