Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1868-06-20
MISCELLANEOUS.
Fashionable InvnIidisIrr.

ranny L ern almost Always WRITES pIdCti-
cally and to the point. The following from
her pen is well worthy the perusal of oil
whom it may concern:
hope to live to see the time when Il Win
be considered disgrace to be sick; when
people with fiat chests and STOPPING shoul-
ders will creep round the back way, like
other violators of known laws. Those who
inherit sickly constitutions, have my since
rest pity. only request one favor of them,
that they cease perpetuating themselves till
they are physically on sound basis. But
q woman who laces SO tight that she breathes
only by a rare accident; who vibrates con-
stantly between the coniectioner's shop and
the dentists Office; who has ball robes and
jewels in plenty, but who owns neither an
umbrella nor water proof cloak, nor pair
of thick boots who lies in bed til! noon,
never exercises, and complains of total
want of appetite" save for pastry and
pickles; she is simply disgusting nuisance.
Sentiment is all very nice but, were | a
man, ! would beware of woman that
couldn't eat" Why don't she take nice
| little bit of beefsteak with her breakfast,
and nice acGIk-not TidG-after it 2 Why
don't she stop munching sweet stuff between
meals Why don't she go to bed at de-
cent time, and lead clean, healthy life 2
| The doctors and confectoners have ridden in
their carriages long enough, let the butchers
and shoomakers take turn at it. man
or woman who cant eat" is never sound
on any question. 1t is wasting breath to
converse with them. They take hold of
everything by the wrong handle. OF course
| it makes them very mad TO whisper plying
| ly, "dyspepsic," when they advance some
| i ta1 in;n I'm 7 ol, 1A Tha,,
are not going to muddle my brain with
their theories, because their internal works
are in q state of physical disorganization.
Let them go into a lunatic asylum and be
properly treated till they can learn how
they are put together, and know how to
manage themselves sensibly.
How | rejoice in a man or woman with a
chest; who can look the sun in the eye, and
steps of as if they had not wooden legs. 1t
| is rare sight. If woman now has an
errand round the corner she must have a
| carriage to go there; and the men, more
| dead than alive, SO lethargic are they with
constant smoking, creep into cars AND om-
nibuses, and curl up in corner, dreading
nothing so much as a little wholesome exer-
ton. The more "tired" they are, the more
diligently they smoke; like the women who
drink perpetual ;0a ito keep them up"
Keep them up Heavens l am fifty five,
and feel half the time as if l were Just
made. To be sure l was born in Maine,
where the timber and the human race last )
but don't eat pastry, nor candy, nor ice
cream. don't drink tea-bah 0dlh, not
ride. I own stout boots, and pretty ones
too | have a waterproof cloak, and no
diamonds. like nice bit Of beefsteak,
anybody else who wants it may eat pap. /
go to bed at ten, and get up at six. l dash
out in the rain, because it feels good on my
face. don't care for my clothes, but aoill
be we'll /; and after am buried, ! warn you,
don't let any frssh air or sunlight down on
my coffin, if you don't want me to get up.
| utppv YEnDo TT is said that among