The Carson daily appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1865-1870, 1868-11-29
HORACE GREELEY.
Mark Trains Humorous Description Of
Him.
From Wilkes Spirit of the Times. ]

a, health unimpaired and the brain vigorou:
no He then wakes up all the household and as
ID sembles them in the library, by candle lish,
,e and, after quoting the beautiful lines
ID 8. Early to bed and early to rise
,r Makes man he althy. wealthy and wise.'
J. he appoints each individuals task for thu
II day, sets him at it with encouraging words
s. and goes back to bed again. mention here
e in no fault-tnding spirit, but with the defer
y ence justly due a man who is older ard wiser
/, and worthier than l, that he SHORES awfuily
$ In a moment of irritation once. was rash
5 enough to say l never would sleep with him
: until he broke himself off this unfortunate
e habit. l have kept my word with bigoted
: and unwavering determination.
AT halfpast eleven O'Clock Greeley rises
r again. He shaves himself. He considers
; that there is great virtue and economy in
shaving himself He does it with a dull
razor, sometimes humming part of tune
The knows part of tune, and takes an lnno-
cent delight in regarding it as the first half
of Old Hundred; but parties familiar with
that hymn have felt obliged to confess that
they could not recognize it, and, therefore,
the noise he makes is doubtless an uncon-
scious original composition of Greeley's),
and sometimes, when the razor is especially
dull, he accompanies himself with formula
| like this: Damn the damned razor and
the damned outcast who made It'll. G.
| He then goes out to his model garden and
applies his vast store of agricultural knowi- |
edge to the amclioration of his cabbages a;
| after which he writes an able agricultural
article for the instruction of American farm
ers, his soul cheered the while with the re-
Election that ii eabbages were worth Sll
apiece his model farm would pay.
He next goes to breakfast, which is
frugal, abstemious meal with him, and con-
sists Of nothing but just such things as the
market afords-nothing more. He drinks
nothing but water-nothing whatever but
water, and coffee, and tea. and Scotch ale,
and lager beer, and lemonade with fly in it
sometimes house fly and sometimes a
horse fy-according to the amount of inspira-
ton required to warm him up to his daily
duties. During break last he reads the Tri-
bune all through, and enjoys the satisfaction
of knowing that all the brilliant things in it,
written By Young, and Cooke, and Hazard
and myself are attributed to him by con-
tiding aud internal public. :
After breakfast he writes short editorial,
and puts large dash at the beginning of it,
thus -, which is the same as if he put
H. g. after it, and takes savage pleasure in
rejecting that none Of US under>trappers can
use that dash, except in protane converse i
lion, when chatting over the outrage. He
writes this editorial in his own handwriting.
He does it because he is so vain of his pen
pride in his penmanship. He hired ont once,
n his young days, a writing master. but
he enterprise failed. The pupils could not
translate his remarks with any certainty.
His first copy was, . Virtue is its re-
sard," and they got II, Washing with soap {
5 wholly absurd" and SO the Trustees dis
harged him for attempting to convey bad
morals, through the medium Of worse pen ii
nanship. But, as | was saving, he writes
is morning editorial. Then he tries to read
over, and can't do II, and so sends it to
he printers, and they try to read it, and AZ
ant do it; and so they set it up at random, ca
S you may say, putting IN what words they
an make out, and when they get aground on
long word they put in Reconstruction" or \
universal suffrage" and spar off and pad u
lie ahead, and next morning, if the degraded
u5.ic can tell what it is all about, they say
[. G. wrote it and ii they can't they say it q
one of those im5ecile understrappers that
the end of it.
On Sundays Greeley sits in prominent
Wv in Chapin's Church, and lets that he ~
asleep, ana the congregation regard it as
4 eccentricity Of genius.
When he is going to appear in public, T
reeiey spends two hours on his toilet. He L
the most pans-taking and elaborate man fei'
'out getting up his dress that lives in :
meIica. This is his chiefest and pleasant
t foible. He puts on his old white over VIII
at, and turns up the collar. lie puts on a 9u'
lied shirt, saved from the wash, and leaves ?
e end of the collar unbuttoned. He puts -
his most dilapidated hat, turns it wrong
ie before, cants it to the back of his
ad, and jams an extra dint in the side of II /
He puts on his most atrocious boots, and II
ends fifteen minutes tuching the left leg Of and
pants into his boot-t0p in what shall
I'm the most careless and unStudied way. v
It his cravat-it is into the arrangement OF
cravat that he throws all his soul, all the : =
Ser Of his great mind. After fixing at it 80
forty minutes before the glass it is per- !
tit is askew every way-lt overtiowS his
It collar on one side and sinks into obiv- AZ
on the other-it climbs and it delves n
und about his neck-the knot is conspcu- n
ly displayed under his left ear, and it
stches one Of its long ends straight out p, C,
izontally, and the other goes after his "
$, IN the good old Toodies fashion-dnd Il. S
n, completely and narvelously appareled,
'eley strides forth, rolling like a sailor, a
acle of astounding customary, the awe
wonder of the nation VIZ,
tut l havn't time to tell the rest Of his
rate habits. Suffice it that he is an up
1t and an honest mana practical, great
med mana useful man to his nation and
genera,ion-a famous man, who has just 4 Il
earned his celebrity-and, withal, the
st dressed man in this or any other coun-
even though he does take so laundering
n pains and put on SO many frills about