North Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1867-current, 1868-08-12
No Beaux


No Benux Anywhere.
No beaux Absolutely no beaux =
Well, young ladies, stop and consider if,
after all, you yourselves have not pro-
nounced the sentence of Punishment.
We? we ''banish'' them? Good cra-
cious! Is it not for them we have de-
vised all this elabortion of adornment p
We, indeed! Were we~not, for weeks.
before we came to these odious mountains.
where men are as scarce as French hair
dressers, closetted with our dressmakers
and mi!liners TO produce those bewitching
"suits,' long and short, for morning and
evening, outdoor and indoor wear p
lave we not cool dresses and warm
dresses; dresses for rain, dresses for sum
shine, dresses for neutral weather, with
ribbons, gloves, sashes, parasols, hats and
fans to "match." to the minutcst shade ?
For whom should we take all that trouble
but for tie beaux? And how are we re-
sponsible for their disgusting absence?
Listen, my dears, for in that which you
have just said lies your %oifense. Can
damsels thus arrayed walk in the woods.
climb the mountains Except in poetry?
Can they take even an ordinary, mild
walk, without mortal terror of p~eriling
their millinery? Must they not, there
fore, ride morning, afternoon and
evening, everywhere, to the dedication of
stable-keepers, and the consequent pecu-
mary depict en- of the beaux?'' These
beaux, whose fathers may be rich, hut
whose sons have yet to fill their individual
Golfers; these bcaux, who have Just so
much to expend when they get away on
a summer holiday, and who do not desire
to pour it all into the pockets of the stable
keeper; these beaux. who can get vastly
more fun out OF their purses, and make
them last longer, with u party of ''the
feIlows'-this is the reason that, with
rare exceptions, you have to throw away
these ravishing ~toilettes on your own sex,
when you play croquet. or sit on the piaz-
"a, dreaming of the coming man.
My dears. he non't come! He knows
too much. He has seen his sisters mil
liner and mantua-maker bills, and heard
the family discussions thereon; and though
he acknowledges your destinations even
through all the absurd toggery you are
doomed Ivy fashions slavery to have and to
wear, he has yet to make the fortune to
enable him to foot his angels bills. So
he runs away from you, discreetly; runs
off fishing or cunning with the "fellows,"
and, wiser than you, comes home brown,
hale and hearty for the winter months,
instead of perspiring at your side in tight
boots and yellow kids.
Do you begin to understand Now,
my dears, if you have been ushered into
the world in coach and six, till your feet
and hands have become paralyzed 70,
want of use, that is your misfortune, and
your fault. Because that necessitates q
rich husband. And as there are very few
rich young husbands, you will have tc
bid good bye to your girlish ideal. and
marry the bald-headed, equity Mr.. Smith
who was born at the same time as YOU,
own father. This, my dears, you will
have to do. or face your nightmare, singh
ilessedness.
have looked at your playing croquct
without a coat tail among you; l hav,
seen you driving yourselves out in you.
pretty little phatons; and though you pu
a brave face on it, | know very well wha
is going under that gay little sash of yours
and l think it is a pity that you shoult
have been brought up to so many artificial
wants, that your heart must 70 hungry il
life's spring time because of them.
My dears, | never lacked beaux at you
age. But a walk in the woods, or in tn,
city either, involved no expense to III,
beau. | could climb a fence, where Their
was no gate. or where there was either;
was not afraid of dew or rain, becaus
my dress was simple. MY gifts We're no
diamonds, but flowers, or books. NJ,
mother would not nave allowed me to rid
with gentlemen, had they asked me. Whe1
they came to spend an evening, our ira.
Of refreshments did not involve a "Frencl
cook"
So you see, my dears, though l had n
silk dresses, | had plenty of beaux, and
, gay heart; and | enjoyed a sail with a
old sanbonnet over my curls, or IL moon
light ramble with a merry party, muc
better than you do 1.-THE German an
! half an hour was sufficient warning fo
me ''to dress for any kind of q party
indoors or out-because. unlike you.
!. was not bothered to choose from twent
dresses which to wear; and | will give yo
leave to ask any of my beaux. who ar
-, o grandfathers, if | was not able to Sc
tie their accounts And it j. because
q had such n good time that ] feel yexe
= that your youth and prettiness should S
! often 90 IA begging-though no fault {
=, yours; and you may show this to you
mothers, and tell them l say so.-Fann
Fern, IN the Ledger.