The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1868-02-14
SPARE LINES.

What can you NOT namc without break.
ing it! Silence.
When u silence likely to get wet' When
itrcigns.
The pleasure Of doing good is the only
one that never wears out.
Another successful breeder Of short
"horns"-whisky tax.
Speech 10 silver bu, silence gold. Hence
the Oppression, hush money.
Men, like books, have al each end a
blank lcaf-chiLlhood and old age.
A mans life is too long when he outlivcs
his character aml his health.
Childhood-Ths finger Of God upon our
brow. gradually removed by the hand Of
time.
Memory r. not 80 brilliant N hope, but is
almost as beautiful, and n thousand times
No trse.
The repentance that is delayed until old
oge IS but too often regret for the inability
to commit more sin.
Why does the new moon remind one Of
agiddy girl! Because she is too young to
show much reflection.
Virtue maketh men on tho earth famous,
in their grave ilus,rious, in the heavens
immortal.
Garments Of beauty may cover, but they
can never impart, porih to abandoned char.
acter.
VIVA, gentleman can. with any sense Of
propriety, ask Jat woman to lean on his
arm.
Why is a wife like newspaper? Be-
cause every man should have one without
borrowing his neighbor's.
The minister who boosted Of preaching
without notes, didn't mean to DO under
stood to refer to grecnbacks.
Money in your purse will credit YOU
wisdom In your head ndorn you-but both
in your necessity will serve you.
A Indy being asked to waltz gave the
following sensible answer. mo thank
you, sir; have hugying enough at home
Keep out Of bad company, for the
chance 10 that when the devil fires into the
flock he will hit somebody.
Why is rooster standing on fence like
q silver halfdollar? Because il 10 head on
one side and tail on tho other.
A lady Of moro wealth than culture ap.
Piled a, Boston bookstore recently Tor
Dickens novel, "David Copperhead."
Advertising for a wife, saysa co,empora.
~, is Just as absurd rs il would DO to get
measured for an umbrella.
A man who is thoroughly in earnest. is
honest, and having moderate share Of tai
ent. can hardly fail OF success.
Why is fathers nose like a wcll.traincd
child? Because il is always under pa
rents eye.
II YOU would be pungcnt 10 brief; for j,
is with words as with sunbcsms-the more
they are condemned the deeper they burn.
II is said that the author Of @Rally Round
the Flag" has gone into the nsg.ssoue bus
neSs, and instead Of rallyins round tho flag,
he now flags around the alley.
"Ma, if you will give mo an apple I viii
be good" mo, my child. you must not
be good for pay-yOu ought to be good for
nothing"
Before you scold he sure that you are
right yourself lie that attempts to cleanse
a blot with blo,ted fingers makes greater
blur.
Literary critics can not determine whcth-'
or men or women arc the superior letter.,
writers, hut they arc unanimous in declar-
ing women are the greatest story-tcllers.
No young man In the Cyclades, where
the principle business is diving for spongcs,
is allowed to marry until he can descend
easily to depth Of twenty iathoms.
The happies, life on earth, Luther used
to say, is with pious, good wife in peace
aud quiet, contentcd with little, and Civ
ing God thanks
An lllinoisian hung himself in corn.
crib the other day, leaving pathetic note
which read: "Hilliam Hin, when this you
see, remember me-
Never deny a favor to brother when
you can grant il. Il makes you none the
poorer. and enriches you in the fact thu, il
gives ono moro heart to look gratefully to
you.
A clergyman. in Me'huen, somc years
age, had letter addressed to q member Of
his church whose given name was Isaac.
How do you think il was spelled! Here
it's: Eyczuk.
Mrs. Jones, farmers wife in Connec.
ticut says: al b'licvc I've 20, tho tender.
cst.hearted boys in tho world, I can't tell
ono Of 'em to fetch . pail Of water, but
what he bu,, on, crying"
A lady acquaintance, when she goes
shopping says, that IL the article IS good,
won't fade, il warranted, gets good meas
arc, and she wants il, and can't get IL for
any less, she always buys without jabber.
ing about it al day.
'.why is tho name Of George Washing.
ton any moro to be respected and hooored
than mine?" sail teacher to his pupil
"Because he never told a lie," was the
discriminating bu, no, over complimentary
reply.