West-Jersey pioneer., 1868-10-23
TALKS WITH WOMEN.
BY JENNIE JUNE.
MARRIAGE AS A PARTNERSHIP.

of men by the war, the increased cost of
living, the rapid growth of luxury, and
the necessities resulting from the crowded
state Of the great cities, have contributed
to very material alteration in the social
condition of the women Of this country,
and to the advancement Of many theories
calculated to relieve men of the burden
Of exclusive maintenance, and charge it
partly upon women.
| This idea is repugnant to the generous
and chivalric tone of the American char
ac,er, but is beginning to find currency
from the pressure of the times, the ad-
miration felt for English literature and
English ideas, and the controlling infu-
ence which the presence of great foreign
element of less liberal habits and opinions
exerts among US.
America has heretofore, and to some
extent truly, been called the paradise
of women. Here they have generally re-
ceived not only courteous and considerate
treatment, but certain deferential hom-
age, all the more graceful on the part of
those who paid it, because it was tribute
to weakness, instead of being exacted by
strength.
Men, ordinary in other respects, be-
came brave, heroic, knightly, and tender
in their relations to women. Men, coarse
and rude to each other, became polite to
women, old as well as young, because
they were women, and men of all classes
found their pleasure in saving their wives,
mothers, and sisters from hardships and
sisters from hardships and promoting
their comfort by every means in their
power.
Straws show which way the wind blows,
and the change in the behavior of men,
calling themselves gentlemen, on the
street cars, and in other public convey
ances, toward women, affords evidence of
the truth, that influences are at work to
destroy the little prestige which has
served as some compensation for the loss
to women of the free and Independent ex-
istence which naturally belongs to men.
Superficial people say, the fault is in
women themselves, that they have grown
discourteous, and no longer acknowledge
favors conferred. But this is false, and
if it were true, would be no excuse for
want of gentlemanly conduct on the part
of men. 1t is not necessary for men to
resign all their rights and privileges to
| women in public conveyances, OF anywhere
else, but there are many reasons why
women are less able to endure physical
| fatigue than men, and considerate man
will remember this. and saveswomen un-
necessary suffering by every means in his
power.
1t is notorious that upon the ferry
boats which ply between New York and
its suburbs, women can hardly get seat
in the cabins devoted to their accommo-
dation. To avoid the smoke and reeking
atmosphere Of what is called the "Gentle-
mems" cabin, men flock into the Ladies'
cabin, appropriate the seats and allow
women to stand beside them, in front of
them, and around them, without moving
an inch.
Such acts of discourtesy pave the way
very naturally, for the English idea Of
marriage as business partnership, to
which the wife shall contribute her share
Of the expenditure
And, indeed, at first sight, such an ar
rangement seems by no means an unjust
one. To the English mind it is not only
equitable, but highly honorable and
praiseworthy.
The English, it must be remembered
& speak Of the masses), are only just
emerging from barbarism as regards
women. Among the poorer classes, the
women labor universally, in addition to
performing their domestic duties, and
when | say the poorer classes, do not
mean the very poor, but respectable
tradesmen, shop-keepers, clerks, and the
junior members of the professions, and as
by law Englishmen can, and as in prac-
tice Englishmen generally do, appropriate
all their wives earnings, it is considered
and really is mark of commendable pro-
gress, that they should be allowed to ex-
ercise the right of control over part,
and disburse the same for themselves.
The fallacy Of the argument, the in
justice of such an arrangement as exist
ing between husband and wife, lies Just
here: in the enormous difference between
their respective physical and domestic
liabilities
Marriage ought to be partnership in
the truest and best sense of the term, but
it can never be justly partnership in
mere pecuniary sense-that is to say. in
the sense which demands from the wife
a money contribution to the domestic
fund. in addition to her risk and her cares
as wife and mother
But it may be charged that women are
not faithful in the performance of their
duties as wives and mothers Who told
you they were not? Look around upon
your friends and acquaintances, and
count upon your fingers the derelict wives
and mothers To one who is fashionable
and frivolous, and neglectful of her duties,
you will find ten who accomplish the
work of two persons, either as maid.of-all-
work in addition to wife and mother, or
by outside labor in addition to domestic
responsibility that can not be got rid Of |
Moreover, what motive is presented to
women to induce them to be good wives
and mothers, beyond their own natural
affection and instincts? None at ALL
|
Under the present system, the more ex-
emplary woman is, the less compensa-
tion and Acknowledgement she receives;
while heartlessness and extravagance
obtain their own terms, and, if accom-
panied by personal charms, are not only
excused, but applauded.
Is not this all wrong? Does not the
woman who bears children, who cares for
them, who superintends the household,
earn her share Of the income, and is she
not entitled to voice in its disposition,
just as we'll as the man In this sense,
as well as upon the higher basis ofmutual
confidence and affection, marriage should
be partnership, in which both should
claim equal rights, on the ground of equal
though different duties.
Aa IL 10 x~o..~k =. l.