The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1868-12-19

nen / - ~ ~ lis to,sb yondnr bsuids
fh4 - md a ~ re$szfn iron ! AM
dreu1 u H. o1ooo of tbo oe6Sfon, found
|my &6kc % ~ d6atkbed NV bsotber
r71-Wkp ~ bepn uniortun.ts, and, I
lItrt1. ooGnothjng vorse-had quilted Tho
nlI Ieoee a0d e1tofsd ab aard msn.ol.
= oemGo6 s..:..see and Che poor did
- Wtoee hssv. aad Essn boand up ii him,
It. y q ~ hesd afssr.
- eseeipg q ny htherss funeral.
esless - hew tGsgoaehly | sm uhfitted for
- Nore1--how tet1liy ! wsnt strength
NJ hehas Ihave said, ~ intended me for
sns sss,eh I'd g ~ psogr-ss onward
iro@ els ~ clas4 end iron school to cols
'IsJe, { hod thoafht but littIs Of each psrsic-
n1sr sesps - y eneegsd ms f5r ths time, and
aothinso ths uitinate objects 10 which Il
led. Al ny nore siGoeous aspiFslions we're
directed . remote future and IN unsub-
stant1sl shadow. but | had witnessed, be.
sids ~ f1fter's III, what hsd led me seri-
'eni4 - FsAeeg "a the ostsnsi6is ins.a for
ghich iivsd snd studisd and the more
carefully weighed myself in the baisnce.
tns more did hnd myself swanting. You
have heard Of Mr. Brown OF the Secession,
&he anthOr Of shs Dictionary sf the Bible"
He was N cid scquaintance of my fathers !;
and, on hsaring Of his Illness, had come all
the way from Hsddington 70 see him. felt,
Tor The 6rst time, ~ knesIing be ide bis bed,
heard my fathers breashings bee ,ming
sSssv rsomeat shorter aud more difficalt, anu
lissseed 70 the prayers Of the clergy usn,
that | bad 10 business in tne Caurch. Ana
thus still continue 10 feel. 'T~ere "a easy
mattsr 70 produce sach things as pass for
ssrmons among rs, aud TO go respectfully
enough through ths mere roullae of tne pro
sssion but cannot help fseihg that,
though | might do all this and more, my
duty, - clergy man, would be snh lef,
undooe. | want eingieness of aim-I want
earnsssness OF heart 1 cannot teacn men
snsctnaiiy how 20 live we'll; | cannot show
them, with aught Of contideace, nov they
may die sale l cannot enter the churcp
wisnoat acting the part OF hypocrite; aud
the misersbis part VI the hypocrite il shall
ssvsr Be mine 70 act Heaven help ms l
an too little practical morallst myself u
attempt teaching morals 70 others.
"Bus must conclude my story, IL story il
may be called IL saw my poor mother and
my itsle sister deprived, by my fathers
death, Of their sole stay, aud sIroEe to exert
myself IN their behalf. IN The daytime I
copied in lawyers cEcs; my nishls wsr.
spent among the poets. YOU will deem It
tue very madness Of vanity, Mr.. Lindsay !;
but could not live without my dreams oi
literary elninence felt that life woui be
. bank waste without them aad feel -
sui. Do not laugh at my y eskness, wnen
i = 1 r
my country than enjoy her fairest lands
that dread nsmsiess grave many times
more than the grave itself. But, am afraid
the life OF tue literary aspirant 10 rarely
happy one and |, alas am one Of tns weak
81 VI the class. It Is Of Importance thar
the means Of living be not disjsined frosn
the eDd for which We live; anu | -s1th4t
m my case, the disunion is c ,mplete. J'ae
wants aud evils OF life are around me but
the energies through which those should be
Providrd tor, and these warded uf, are other
wise employed. | am like a man pressing
onward through . hot aud bl ,3dy hght, bis
breast open to every blow, aud treusbltngis
aliys 70 the sense of injury and ihe feeling o.
p1fn, bot totally unprepsrrd either 20 attack
zr~a~fsnd% AID thsn, shsss anisrrabls d.
press'ons Of spsriss to which all men who
aras hrgely on their Imagination are SO
sut.J OF; and that Waverins ufesularIty of
ID It snich seems 10 unavvidabiy the sffec
Of pursuing distant and doubtful aim, aud
which proves 20 hust.le TO the formation of
every better habit ALAS TO stea ~ moral
ny itssif But weary you, Mr.. Lindsay !;
besides, my story Is told an cropping on-
ward, | know not whittier ami, IA q sew
As.r.s - A
have closed. shall be exactly where you are
at present."
He ceased speaking, and there was pause
Of several minu.es. felt soalhed and graf
iied. There was . sweet mela .choly mus
in the tones Of nis voice, that suak 70 my
very heart and the conf iepce hs repas-d
10 me f4itsred my prize. "How was IT,"
a. le, 9Th sail, that yon were the gayest 10
the party of Last night r"
81 do not know that I can better answer
you," he replied, ''thau by telling you a sin
gnlar dream which had abput the time Of
my fathers death. dreamed that had
suddenly Quilted the World, aud vas jsur-
neying, BY long and dreary passage, 10 the
placs oi anal punishment. A blue, dismal
light glimmered along the lower wall uf the
N@AAtt 1tf<sB ts0&aA <AA0 04t A0Cuo @1UFUY WuCAC
ttsge hlcksred . thousand undsfned shapes
--things without form or outline-I cuuld
hear deeply drawn sighs, and long hollow
grdAns snd cpnvulsive sobbings. and the pro-
i3nged moanings Of m unceasing anguish.
was aware, however, though | Kne~ not
how, that these were but the expressions vf
q lesser misery, and that the seats Of ssversr
torment were still before me. | went on aud
on, and the vault widened, and the light In
creased, and the sounds Jhanged. There
wers loud laughsers and low mutlerings, 10
the tone Of ridicule; and shouts of triumph
and exalsstion; and, In brief, oil the thous.
and mingled tones Of gay and joyous revsl.
Oan these, l exclaims 1, be the sounds oi
misery when at the deepest sBsshink ther,'
said shadouy form beside ms-'prthink
thee II IL be not 90 on earth, And as re-
nsnbered thar it was 50, and bsthought ms
81 the md revels Of shipwrscksd ssamen
md of plagus-strscksn cities, awoke. But
on this subject yoa must spare me-"
aForeise ne" sad 'sso-uorros leave
eollegss and not with the less relacsAnce
has tma1e part froa yoa. Bes shall yes
fnd yoa eecspyinE place among the liter
eH of eur eeanery, snd shsli rsmember With
pride. thas yoa we're ny friend"
He sighed deeply. sMy hopes rise and
fall uith ny spiEitsyn bs ssid; s.asd TO-
night | m neisocbeiy. Do You ever 70 o.
bsBsss sish y0urself, M. Li1dsay? Do ysu
eses ooek, II ysuf ssddsr moosis, shs hope.
uhish render yos haopiess when ron are
Fayf ~ 'tis bgseer uarfare When 4 man
ooaten1s uitA Hose l-uhen he aces hef.
uish te1le Cd fF0m tbe psrsonifviow ,nGa-