Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1868-08-26
WHATS THE MATTER WITH
THAT N0SET
1N COVER THE RHINE" STORY BY THE
aFAr CONTRIBUTOR"

ponderous Teuton OF very lrasc1bie tenn
sudden and quick in quarrer'-got
mad in a minute. Nevertheless his sa
loon was great resort for the boys
partly because of the excellence of his
beer, and partly because they liked to
chafe "old Snyder" as they called him,
for althe ugh his bark was terrific, expert
ence had taught them that he wouldn't
bite.
One day Snyder was missing, and it
was explained by his 'frau," who ',jerked"
the beer that day, that he had "gone out
fishing nit der poys." The next day one
of the boys who was particularly fond of
roasting old Snyder, dropped in to get
a glass Of teer and discovered Snyder
nose, which was big one at any time,
swollen and blistered by the sun, until it
looked like dead ripe tomato.
why, Snyder, what's the matter with
your nose ?" said the caller.
Il peen out fishing NIT der poys," re-
piled Snyder, laying his finger tendery
aga nst bis proboscis, "the sun it pese hot
like ash der tifsl, unit | purnt my no. e.
Nice nose, don't it ?" And Snyder
viewed it with look of comical sadness
in the little mirror back of his bar. 1t
entered at once into the head of the mis-
chievous fellow in front Of the bar to
play joke upon Snyder, SO he went out
and collected half a dozen OF his com
rades, with whom he arranged that they
should drop in at the saloon one after
another and ask Snyder I" What's the mat
ter with that noseY' to sec how long he
w.uld stand it. The man who put up the
job went in first with companion, and
seating themselves at a table called for
beer. Snyder brought it to them, and
the new conner exclaimed as he saw him
sSnyder, what's the matter with your
nose 2"
II gust dell you fiient here | peen out
fshin' nit der boys, unit the sun he purnt
'em--zwi lager-den cents-all right.
Another boy rushes in. "Halloo,
Toys, you're ahead of me this time,
'spose I'm in, though. Here, Snyder,
bring me class of lager and pret-(ap-
pears to catch a sudden glimpse Of Sny-
der's nose, looks wonderingly moment,
aud then bursts out laughing)-ha! ha
ha! Why, Snyder-ha ha what's
the matter with that nose p zaza
Snyder, of,course, can't see any fun in
having burnt nose, of having it laughed
at, and he says, in tone sternly emphatic
eve peen out fishing NIT der poys,
unit de sun 1t just as hot like ash der
t flount purnt my noe that ish all
right a9
Another tormentor comes in, and in
sists on setting EN- up" for the whole
house Snyder says he, fill up the
boys glasses, and take adrink yourse-
no no ! ha ha ha !! Snyder, wha-
ha ha ! ha ATS the matter with that
nose ?"
Snyder's brow darkens with wrath by
this time, and his voice grows deeper and
sterner--
Il peen out fshin' NIT der poys on the
leedle Miami. The sun pese hot like as
hail, unit [ purn my pugle. Now, that s
more vot don't got to say. Vot gind #
peseness 7 That ish all right; purn my
own nose, don't it
"Burn your nose-burn all the hair off
your head, for what care you needn't
get mad about it." Hl57 81 .a
1t was evident that Snyder wouldn't
stand more than one more tweak at that
nose, tor he Was tramping about behind
his bar and growing like an exasperated
old bear in his cage. Another of his tor
mentors walks in. Some one sings out
to him, "Have glass of beer, Billy ?"
Don't care about any beer" says Billy,
"but Snyder, you may give me one of your
best clga-- Ha "a ha ! ha ha no !
no no he he he ali h h ha! ha ! ha !
ha! Why-why-S who-who-'
ha-a! ha !sehotsthe matter Nth that nose q
Snyder was absolutely fearful to behold
by this time, his face was ourple with rage,
all except his nose, which glowed like
ball of fire. LIE; ming his ponderous fig
ure over the bar, and raising his arm aloft
to emphasize his words with it, be fairly
reared ~ a86
"l've been out ishin' NIT ter boys. The
sun it pese hot like as INFLAMMATION. I
purnt my nose. Now you no like dose
nose, you yust take dose nose unit aor asr
aor .orang your tam american finger NIT
en-! That's the kind of man vot am"
And Snyder was right.
JOSH BILLINGS ON THE CRow-Nex.
to the monkey, the crow has the most
devlltry to spare. They are born very
wild, but kan be tanned az cav az the
goat kan, but tame crow is aktually wuss
than a sore thumb
1t thare IL emmy thing about the hous
that they kant get into it il bekause the
thing amt big enuf had rather watch
distrikt skool than one tame crow.
Crows live on what they kan steal, and
they will steal emmy thing that amt tied
down. 81 81. -e
They are fond ov meat vittles, and are
the fist tew hold an inquest over de-
parted horse or still sheep. They are
a fine bird tew hunt, but hard one rew
kill they kan see you miles first, and
will smell gun right thro' the side ov
a mountain. .y 3 EE- -
They are not songstirs, although they
hay good voice TO cultivate, but what
they do sing they seem to understand
thoroughly ; long praktiss has made them
perfekt. aaa @
The crow is tuff bird, and kan stand
the heat like a blacksmith, and the cold
like stun wall. 4ss s.F.
They build their nests among tree