The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1868-07-24
TRIBUNE JOKES.

Il For the first time within our mem.
ory the New York Tribune allows
itself to perpetrate several columns
of jokes. They are all of political
character, and we select a few .
just read:
| Grants nomination gives univer-
sal satisfaction. SeymOur's, univer-
sal stupefaction.
A Southern journal calls Seymour
I-our HOratio, mind you the "Art-
full DOdger.' Heavens!
The organization of Seymour
Changers" has commenced. Sey-
mour derangers will be in order af-
ter while.
/ Every negro becomes "intelligent,"
"moral," refined" and "white," the
moment he votes the Democratic
ticket.
A, j. compares the New York
nominations to the small -pox-liable
to kill, hard to cure and harder to
endure.
Many of the unterrified base their
hope Of Seymour's carrying New
York upon the fact that his "friends'
can vote oftener than the friends of
any other man.
Seymour's physicians say he is
likely to become crazy within a year.
II he has any hopes OF defeating
Grant, he is crazy already.
The papers announce the portrait
of Frank Blair, taken in Is different
positions. There is one characters
tic common to them all; in every
position he is in pursuit of Office.
The Commonwealth says: ''We are
expecting every day to hear some en-
thusiastic Democrat give as a reason
for COlfax's unfitness for the Vice
Presidency, that he never was drunk
in his liie."
For experienced and skillful wire
workers apply to tho Sachems of
Tsmmany. As a specimen of their
handiwork, see how handsomely they
Gagged the "Young Eagle of the
West.n
Semmes, the pirate, 3 supports
Seymour and Blair, of course, and
has made speech urging their cleo
tion. 1t is suggested that if tn ey
should happen to be elected, he would
make a good Minister to England to
settle the alabama claims.
The LomsyiHe Journal calls George
ii. PendletOn 'the Warwick of the
next Presidency" Four years ago
he was Peace candle--now it seems
he's a Warwick. phis may mean
that there's not a grease spot left of
him-Or, that he's effectually snuffed
out.
A Connecticut Democratic paper
stated that Gen. F. p. Blair is a
graduate of Yale College, and The
New Haven journal explains "Gen
Blair graduated at Yale quite prema-
turely. 1t took him less than year
to go through college"
An old soldier who has lost an arm
says: II am waiting to see if the
people Of this country are going to
elect Horatio Seymour, and if they
do will swear that lost my arm in
a threshing machine, not in defence
of my country"
When people are drowned cannon
are sometimes fired for the purpose
of raising their corpses. The Dem
ocrats have been firing cannon over
Seymour and Blair. But there is no
hopes OF getting their heads above
water.
Many of the delegates and visit I
ors at the Democratic Convention
in this city complained bitterly be-
cause the price Of whisky was put
up to % cents a drink during the
Convention. But they took revenge
in nominating Blair. He will put
whisky down in spite of New York.
Gen. Grant and the Democracy
have done great deal of business to-
gether within the past few years.
Gen. Grant has done the tanning,
and the Democrats have furnished
the hides They handed In two more
last week-those of Horatio Sey-
mOur and Frank p. Blair. They
will be done early in November.
Gen. Albert Pike, said, in a Sey- {
mour mass meeting at Memphis, last
week: "This is struggle for life, or
death. Our honor dearer than our life
IS at stake. The man or the set of men 1
hat denies me the right 10 vote, in
he State IN which l live, is not my
opponent, but my personal
enemy and deadly foe.' That pike
leeds another spearing.
Timely rhymes these:
There's sort o'chsp they call Seymour
4 strange composition called Seymour,
Who stoutly declines,
Then happiness finds
N accepting, does Horatio Sey mour.
III diddle, diddle, Hendricks and his fiddle.
8. +. q. jumped over the moon,
While PendIeton cried t o see such sport,
And Seymour ran of with the spoon.
Sing song of Seymour,
And Blair full of rye;
Every Tammany injun's