Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1868-10-16
Johnny Shrimp's Composition On Amuse-
mentS.

From the New York Commonwealth.
THERE are various kinds ofamusements.
Some people think it amusing to pull dogs
tails. I tried it once with big bull dog,
but found it was not quite as amusing as
I thought. Inever tried tagain. Ma has
many amusements one of 'em used to be
whipping me with slipper; but I'm too
big for that now. It's good to be big
boy for some reasons, only don't think
that because I'm big, l should have to
carry all the groceries home instead OF pa.
Sometimes think pas getting lazy; but |
never tell him so, for pas got a habit OF
doing as he pleases spite of me, and says
he don't want any impudence. l think
when get big I'll have just such habit
Everybody says take after pa wonder
fully. u A. 49,
Aunt Jerusha says my chief emusement
is in tormenting Others But don't think
so, for though l do like to plague folks, |
like the circus good deal better. On!
dear me! h0ao I do like the circus. tell
you now, I'd go to the circus every night
and to the two matinees if | could. |
once knew boy who had free pass and
could go whenever he pleased. I'd rather
be him than be an angel. suppose Twill
be an angel sometime. All good folks get
to be angels by and by, and have plenty OF
feathers. | wish had some OF EN- now,
for my beds awful hard. -
If could have my choice, I'd like to be
the clown in the circus-no! when think
of it, I'd rather be the man in the middle
of the ring, who snaps the whip. tried
it once at recess in school; Whipped the
little boys on the legs with a long switch,
but they didn't seem to like it and cried,
and had to stop. Some boys never can
take joke. Then, I don't know but what
I'd like to ride on horse like NinO Eddie.
No think after all, I'd like the flying
trapeze better. tried it once at home
when ma left me to take care of the baby
with clothes-line fastened to the top
of the bookcase. But it didn't work
good. Somehow fell, right on
the baby, too, and such & squat
ling! But | never did know baby
that gets in the way so much as our baby
does. Don't it know how to cry, though
How ma can call it a precious sooty- noOty-
pooty cherub of lamb I can't see. Lamb,
indeed I'd like to lamm it. believe
that baby knows better than to act as it
does. Aunt Jerusha says ought to ask
no better amusement than tending to that
sweet creature. Sweet, heb! Why it's
Inc heaviest creature IndG ever was DOT0.
1t weighs thousand pounds at least! If
you had to carry it around the room when
it's teething you'd think SO, too It's been
teething and q crying and a growing
heavier ever since it was born. That's
what Aunt Jerusha calls amusement.
l know a boy who's been to Humpty
Dumpty, and ne shows me how Fox looks,
and makes faces that would scare gho st
into conniption fits There was man
once who promised to take me to Humpty
Dumpty, but he never did. suppose he
forgot it. Men always do forget just when
you want 'em to remember, but they're
plaguey sure to remember what you'd
rather have 'em forget. If that man was
boy little bit hitler than [ am, I'd
make him remember.
There are many other kinds of amuse-
ments, besides tormenting others and the
circus, and the baby and "Humpty
Dumpty" There is skating and baseball,
and going to the lectures. l went to the
lecture once with ma, and thought it
was the sleepiest amusement ever had in
my life. I'd rather mind the baby. Base
ball is very good, except when you get hit
on the nose. My nose was once swelled
up as big as cucumber in this amuse-
ment. It's all right now.
Good by. Yours truly,
P. S. Dear sir,
JNo. GEORGE WASHINGTON SHRIMP.