Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1868-12-10
N A s b Y .
NJ. Nasby Suggests a Haven of Rest for
the Distressed Souls who are In Danger
OF Losing their Places.

"
the Distressed Souls who are In DANCE
OF Losing their Places.
WASHINGTON, Nov. IS.
We he'd meetin in Washington las
mite, to consider things. There are man
things to consider jest now, and it wa
deemed proper to consider EN-. 1t WI
faint glimrins Nv hope unto the coun
tenances Nv few NV those present, bu
nothin Nv certinty-nothing NV ashooI
ance. Secretary Randall remarkt tina
so far ez he wuz concerned he he'd mad
up his mind. He should not take off
under the incoming administration. HI
mite yeeld in other matters (for he WI
NV a yeeldin nacher,) but on this he WI
j infiexible. McCulloch and Brownin,
were also determined, but Seward haC
other idees. He chirped in that the old
est man coodent tell wat sixty days WOO,
bring forth.
"Wat shall we do?" askt Postmaste
from Ohio. ID
II sejest for President Johnson SCI
Randall that he apply for the Spanish
throne. He wood be acceptible to tn,
Spanish people, for he hez all his lif
been putin the Bourbon down ~
Randall hez no longer any fear Nv th,
President.
"Gentlemen," remarkt l. II hev al
idea, wieh if acted onto will pull US ou
NV our sea NV troubles ~.
"Speek" exclaimed they all with one
breath, ''speekv'
My idea is Cuba. Cuba, the gem uy
the Antilles-the britest jewel in tn,
crown Nv Spain. Let Secretary Seward
whs hez talent tor reel estate, buy il
now before the new Government hez it:
/ in for oil
while it is hard up for money. Let Cubs
be the politikle Botany Bay NV thi.
country. Let it be bought by Seward
and then let the President go to work tC
wunst fillin offisis for its government
while he still hez the power Nv appint
ment. Hemust not wait to hev ZEN
hold eleckshins, for we alluz succeeded
better in gettin offisis by appintment
| than by eleckshuns. Wat Heaven ]
see open before US I! hev been readin
Cuba up, and find that Island pays the
Home Government S25 200, 900 per an.
mum.
IF the Spanish Government kin gil
S25, 900, 900 out NV EN-, we kin double il
with our experience There's enuff fol
all Nv US. Give Randall a place CORE
spondin with that he now holds; make
Ben Wood superintendent of the Ha-
vana Lotteries make Frank P, suthin
else, wat it don't matter, ez he'll take
anything; make good places for Ross,
Fullerton, Binkley, Mrs Cobb, Vallan-
digham, Brite, Mrs, Perry, John Quincy
Adams, Jr., Frank Peerce, Gineral For
rest, Jim Steedman, Rosso, Doolittle,
Cewan, Dixon, Secretary Welles, and
all Nv that unnumbered throng NV hun
cry soles, who hev lived on pap so long
that any other diet sours on their STUN
icks, and then"
'But sposin Congress, when it meets,
refooses to ratify the purchis by maxim
An appropriashen? askt doubter.
Refooze to make the appropriashun :
Refooze! Ha! Put before Gineral Grant
the prospeck NV never agin seein the
Blair family-put afere Congress and the
Amerikin people the hopeuv never seein
agin the faces NV any NV the men | hev
menshun'd, with the thousands Nv others
NV similar tastes, habits, and necessities,
and wat wood twenty or thirty millions,
more or less, be to EN-? NothinI Con-
gress wood vote it 'instantaneously and
the people would say "Amen!n Lord,
how quick the bill wood go through, and
how quick Grant wood sign it.
''But spOsn Congress shood refoose,
wat then 2? Jest ez well. The Blairs
wood hev their pOsishuns, and the Cuban
officials, eff they are versed in American
politikle history, know, eff they know
anything, that when the Blairs get into
a place, nothing but death loosns en-
We shoOd hist the banner NV indepen-
dence-we shood paint onto that banner
the inscripshen: ..Offiees for All, in a
Country where Likker is not taxed I'i
and weeks time an army Nv Dino
krats, big enough to capcher Spain her
self wood be an them shores !! And who
could stand afore EN-? Whisper Post
offs" in their ears, and they'd wade
knee deep in blood. Lord, how the
Spanish soljery wood go down afore em?
How Frank Blair wood go for Lersnndi!
how all the trained cohorts of Dino
crisy wich hev bin abstained from offs
so many years, WOOL risk their all for a
taste Nv the sweets NV posishen'!
1'Oh! the deliciousnis of the prospeck.
Think Nv an island with enuff niggers
onto it to do cur labor, and enuff white
Cubans who can't read to vote for u.s.
Why, it wood recall recollections NV
them happy days before the war, when
the OimOcrisy wuz thus constitood. |
hunger and thirst for sich."
'sRolI swiftly round We wheels of time,
And bring that happy day
"Then Ginral Grant Good hev peece !!
Then he would only hev the Ablishnists
on his hands! Then the niggers Nv the
United States mite ,hev suffrage, for il
wood make no difference to US. We
wood hev offisis to live onto, and pure
niggers to look down upon, and wat more
Good we want? The only difference
wood be, we wood hev to accustom our
StumickS to Santa Cruz rum in place nv