Wyoming democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Wyoming Co., Pa.) 1867-1940, 1868-11-11
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH THAT
NOSE

ago 'ovel the Rhine" Snyder was a
ponderous Teuton, of very irascibIe tenn
per sudden and quick in quarrel-get
mad in a minute. Nevertheless his sa-
loon was great resort for the boys
partly because of the excellence of his
beer and partly because they liked to
chale "old Snyder as they called him
for although his bark was terrific, expe-
rience had taught them that he wouldn't
bite.
One day Snyder was missing, and twas
explained by his ''frau," who ''jerked the
beer" that day, that he had gone out fish
ing NIT ter boys" The next day one Of
the boys who was particularly fond of
roasting old Snyder, dropped in to get a
glass of beer, aud discovered Snider's
nose, which was big one at any time,
swollen and bistered by the sun, until it
looked like dead ripe tomato.
"Why Snyder what's the matter with
your nose % said the caller.
81 have been out fishing NIT ter boys"
replied Snyder, laying his finger teuderIy
against his proboscs. " de sun it pese hot
like ash der tifel, unt purns nv nose.-
Nice nose, don't it - And Snyder view
ed it with a look of comical sadness in the
little mirror back of his bar, 1t entered
at once into the head of the mischievous
fellow in fiont of the bar to play joke
upon Snyder, so he went out and called
half dozen of his comrades, with whom
he arranged that they should drop in at
the saloon one after another and ask Snv-
der whats the matter with that nose 2"
to see how long he wonld stand it. The
man who put up the job went in first with
a companion, and seating themselves, call
ed for beer. Snyder brought it TO them,
and the new conner exclaimed as he saw
him: 'Snider what's the matter with
your nose?"
81 yust deli you friend here | peen out
fishing nit ter boys, unt de sun he burnt
'em-zwi lager-den cents all right"
Another boy rushes in. "Hallo, boys
you're head OF me this time" 'spose am
in though. Here Snyder bring me a
glass of lager beer and pret-(appears to
catch a glimpse of Snider's nose, Looks
wonderfully moment, and then bursts
ont Iaughing)-ha! ha ha! Why,
Snyder, ,-ha ha whats the matter
with that nose 2"
Snyder of course, can't see any fun in
having burnt nose, or having it laughed
at, and he says, in tone sternIy emphatic
I've been out fishing NIT ter boys unt
de sun yust SO bot like ash der tifcl, and |
purnt my nose dat ish all right
Another tormentor comes in, and in
sists on setting 'em up" for the whole
house Snyder" says he, "fiIl up the boys
glasses and take drink yourself-ho
no ho ha! ha ha ! Snyder, what's the
matter with that 2"
Snyder's brow darkens with wrath by
this time, and his voice grows deeper aud
sterner-"I peen out fshn' NIT ter poy:
on der Ieetle Miami The sun pese hot
ash hail, unit | purnt my bugle. Now, dat
is more vot don't got to say: Vot gind
of pesens? That ish all right purnt my
own nose, don't it 7"
"Burn YOUR nose--burn all the hair of
your head for what care you needn
get mad about it "
1t was evident that Snyder wouldn't
stand more than one more tweak at that
nose, for be was tramping about behind
his bar and growing like an exasPerated
old bear in his cage, Another of his tor
menterS walked in. Some one sings out
to him, "Have glass of beer, Billy"
"Don't care about any beer says Billy
but Snyder you can give me one Of your
best cigars -Ha-a-a ha ha ho no
he he ha ha-ha Why-wby Snyder
what's the matter with that nose
Snyder was absolutely fearful to behold
by thai time, his face was purple with
rage, all except his nose, whic!:: glowed
like ball of fire Leaning his ponderous
figure far over the bar, and raising hi:
arms aloft to emphasize his worl with IT
he fairly roared:
"I've pcen out fishing NIT ter poys -
The SUI it pcse hot like as hail-tamnation
| purnt my nJse, Now you no like dose
nose, you yust take dose nose unt wr.wr
wr-wring your tam American finger Wi
EN- That's the kind of man vot am /! ;
And Snyder was right.