The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1868-11-13
BEEcHER ON HAY FEVER.

Portable and unsatisfactory diseases on
record, and defies all riles OF the medf-
cal schools, NIL skill Of the doctors. REM
edies arc unknown, unless one confines
himself to Daniel webster's prescription,
when asked what he did for his Hay Fe-
YER; ~ take fourteen handkerchiefs a
day, madam" Henry Ward Beecher
gives q description Of the disease In his
own unlmitablc style, aud we recommend
It's perusal by all sufferers and sympa-
thizers:
my dear Friend: That you are a nov
ice in.the matter Of Hay Fever, Is very
plain from the question you put. For II
you have ever had It, you will never again
ask what are the symptoms. Imagine
man asking what are the symptoms BY
which he might know whether his nose
had been pulled, or whether he had been
kicked down stairs, or whether some one
had thrown over him the unsavory con-
tents Of o bucket.
The Hay Fever Is all symptoms.
You notice some evening that your eyes
are suddenly weak. The light dlsturbs
them. All In an hour they begin to shed
copious tears. The nose sympathizes.
Your handkerchief suddenly becomes tile
most important object In life. By the
next day the slightest DRAFT Of wind sets
you to sneczlng. 1t Is a revelation. You
never before even suspected what It was
really to sneeze. If the door Is open you
sneezc. If u pane Of glass Is gone you
sneeze. Ifyou look into the sunshine you
snecze. IL n little dust rises from the car
net. or the OdOr OF flowers Is waited to
YOU, or smell OF smoke, you inconvenlent-
| IN snccze. Ifyou sncezc once you sneeze
twenty times. It Is q riot OF sneezes.
First. u single one, like leader In hosk
of sheep, bolts over; and then. In spite. OF
all YOU can do, the whole flock, my Dy
count, come dasling over, In twos, III
tlycs. In punches 0ftwenty.
They do not walt for order. They treau
| on each other. Four or five sncezcs run
| together-a mere clash OF sneezes. 1our
eyes meanwhile overflow. Your nose re-
joces. That has befallen you for whlch
the prophet longed: "Your head has been
a fountain of tears" have heard It SAID
that 10 one can do well more than one
thing ut time. II only you have opthal-
mic catarrh, you may cry, blow, sneeze
and cough each and altogether. After
twenty minutes the paroxysm passes, anu
you cautiously put your hand up to see
lf ANYTHING Is left of your head. II is all
therel Gradually you get used to It, and
come to regard your head as piece or
| artillery invented to throw sneezes.
1t IL well known that when In health
one may stop snecze by strOking his
nose 80 rs 10 fatter 1t little. There are
times when, though u sneczels luxury,
Il IL out of place. Much as we like lux
uries, we are conscious that they do not
flt all seasons or grace all places. One
could not willingly eat lce-cream at M
neral, nor be married with q cigar In his
mouth.
Lounging on summer verandah, the
bees drOning and the flies buzzing, hear
ty. sneeze Is enjoyable. But when dis
course grows touching. and the house Is
still, and the climax Is just reached, q re-
sounding sneeze, especially II you split It
up by trying to suppress 1t, Introduces
new train of associations: This Is even
less agreeable II you are an honorary mem-
ber. or some distinguished person, put
upon the platform, rs girls put their
pearls or ribbons OIL the neck, for show.
But Just imagine man In the full fight
of hay cold going to meeting! and not
only. In the words of the immortal Watts,
''firing his zeal along the road" but break.
Ing out In serrnoi-tlme with rattle Of
sneezes-a perfect ftislllade! One man
sneezlng can take an audience out OF
Whltefeld or Demosthencs. Wherefore
q sneezc Is stronger than an oratlon..
These are the early symptoms, and con-
tinue about q fortnight. Then, without
letting 20 of sneezlng, your head becomes
stuffed with real premium cold. You
cannot breathe through your nose, and
not much through your mouth. You can
smell nothing and taste nothing, ana see
but very little, aud that little In water.coi-
ors. Eating becomes q matter OF skill.
You cannot eat with your mouth at the
same time that you are breathing through
It. Two trains meeting on single track
one or the other must switch OIL. Ihus,
you chew and hold your breath; and then
breathe % while. Thus you shut OH, al-
tcrnatcly, bread and breath. This stage
lasts about two weeks more. II Is not
uniform and dull. Now and then u day
will, without q cause or warning, plump
down on you with all the symptoms OF
the first period. The structure will be re-
moved; eyes and nose. like the hill amer
winter will flow down In rills, and sneezes
will awaken sylvan echoes, like birds
among the trees.
The third stage Is known by the ten
dency of the whole complaint to descend.
Il seeks to become bronchial. Y0n are
seized with spasmodlc coughs. IL you
give way to them, they Will leave you
feeling as ifa blunderbuss, loaGed with
shot. had been discharged through your
lungs. A cough, like breachy horse,
should be ridden with snaflie (n0t snufiie)
and curb. and never suffered to get under
way, or to 20 faster than walk. But It
Is not an unrelleved cough. for II alter
mates with nsthmn-a complaint In which
n man feels when asleep, rs u some one
was suilOcating him with an unfare use OF
hemp: and, when awake, rs if the hemp
wrew inside of him, and he was trying
with his breath To pull II up by the roots.
Before YOU had busy days, but now you
will have YOUR chief occupation at night.
I do not wish you to think that have
given YOU all the symptoms. Only tha
outlines are herein set down. The filllng
nm must be withheld nom llteratim and
lcft to experience.
One or the striking features Of tlils dis
order is the obstinate neglect Of the pa
tlent to get well.
For remedies arc abundant. They are
infalliblc, too. They pour In upon you
thick IA rain drops In an equinoctial storm.
Each only comes with trophies. II has
cured It's scores, and can cure everything
that sneczcs.
Let me draw ont system Of treatment
from the elements which have been recon-
mendcd to me. First q complete routine
ct water treatment, Including not osths,
iouches apl Wet Dacks with driDplng
sheet every morning.
ThIs IA 10 arouse nature In tho system
and prepare It for thorough work:
Next. as soon as sneexing begins you
.hould procure catarrh snufi, OF which
there arc some forty kinds, moro or less;
as you cannot be expected to know which
one Is best adapted to your particular
Ease. YOU had better try them all. Ny
friend. Mr.. Milne, Fulton street, Brook |
iyn, viii procure them for you with pleas
,ire, Hekceps u patent medicine store