Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1868-01-24
JANUARY "a, 1868.

follow them to their homes, we should
find three-fourths Of them lonely women,
settling down, more or less submissively,
to life within four walls, and dwelling
morbidly on looks and words, and tones
and gestures, to which their active, out
door husbands attach no meaning, and
in the suffering they cannot sympathize.
But what is the remedy for this loneli-
ness and weariness of which so many
married women are the unpitied victims
Well, the only remedy lies in the hands
of mothers, who, instead of trying to
crafty a petty pride, by rushing their
daughters into matrimony upon the first
opportunity, ought to impress upon them
clearly the aspect which the marriage
relation bears for women the subjective
position she occupies, and the strength of
the visible or invisible barriers which will
oppose themselves to every exercise of
her own will
Girls now enter matrimony blindfold-
ed. They imagine, poor fools, that it is
going to give them freedom, state, pro-
lection, support and the eclat of estab-
lished social position.
In the bridal ceremony they see only
the white satin, the jewels, the congratu-
lations, the triumph over girlish friends,
the pleasures of a bridal trip, and un-
limited supplies of flowers and eonfec-
tionary for an endless future.
How quickly the spirit of their illu-
sive dreams would change if they would
catch a glimpse of the grinning skeleton
which not unfrequently presides over the
marriage-feast. If they could look into
that future, which now seems so bright,
and see the solitary woman, the unloved
woman, the neglected woman, the woman
absorbed by cares, and out of whose life
has dropped, little by little, all of the
beauty and sunshine of which it once
seemed to be so full.
1t is undoubtedly difficult for bride
to realize such fate as in store for her.
Whatever happens to the rest of man or
woman kind, he and she are bound to
prove exceptions.
Still course of preliminary tutelege
could hardly fail to impress her mind
with certain possibilities, and if she could
once see in marriage only one form of
work, duty, responsibility, a state whose
privileges, such as they are, are certainly
counterbalanced by its subjective disa.
bilities, nine out of ten would hesitate
and reflect, whether it might not be as
whom they are already surrounded
| whether, by their own exertions in some
other way, position might not be achiev-
ed, and independence at the same time
maintained.
The miserable training and education
which girls receive stultifies every noble
instinct, and destroys every honorable
ambition. Still, there are young women,
even now, who, encouraged by parental
| guidance and stimulus, prefer to win
| the rewards of honest and courageous
effort for themselves, than accept a
| grudged maintainance from the hands of
any man, and become at the same time
his convenience, his servant, and the
bearer of his children.
/ know two women, one the principal
of a thriving young ladies seminary, the
other physician in successful practice,
who both deliberately declined several
offers which most young ladies would
have jumped at as splendid " because
they preferred to work their own way
and enjoy the results of their own
| achievements untrammeled.
The physician supported her parents
while they lived, educated a younger
brother, and now enjoys her fine resi-
dence, her carriage, and an income of ten
thousand dollars per year.
know another woman, luxuriously
brought up, ardent, ambitious, who fol-
lowed the natural course of events, and
got married. 1t was love-match, and
her life was very exceptionable. Her
husband was man of great refinement.
Both possessed artistic tastes, and both
were to be free to follow them, without
any reference to the grosser domestic ne
cessities.
But, alas! though no violent transi-
tions occurred, matrimonial destiny
proved too much for the wisest calcula-
ton. Men are not obliged to stay at
home to look after the housekeeping, to
see that the children are cared for, to
cook the dinner if Bridget goes off in a
huff, to mend the stockings, to cut out,
and possibly make Juvenile aprons and
nightgowns but somebody must do it,
and generally it is the wife.
1t was so in this instance. Conscien.
| tiousness and n sense of duty triumpbed