The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1868-02-15
lTo BR coHTIEUED.l
A Jealous Wife Cured.


Sam j is jolly, rollicking cass, with
face always expanded BY q smile, and a
heart always warm with affectionate yearn-
ing for his pretty little wife. But Sans
jolly, free and easy disposition places him on
the most friendly terms with all who know
him, male and female, and the gushing
warmth Of his heart often displays itself in
the most kindly demonstrations towards
those he esteems. Now, Sans wife, although
pretty, and loving him wildly, il not OF the
same rolicking disposition as her husband,
and cannot exactly understand how be can
kiss the girls, as be frequently does, and hug
them too, and ut the same time maintain for
her that love which every husband owes to
his wife. Indeed, fight off the feeling as she
would, the genius of jealousy took posses
sion OF her soul, and she led Sam, to use his
own words, ian awful life" This s'awful
life" Sam endured as best he could, hoping
soon to convince his wife Of the injustice she
did him in suspecting him Of infidelity to
her.
A few weeks ago, Sans vile, Of sudden,
took notion to visit some relative up in the
State Of Ohio, and after admonishing her
husband to be more circumspect and prudent
during her absence, departed on her Jour Ley
TO remain for month. Now Sam is decid-
edlY opposed to sleeping alone, being vic
tim of horrible nightmare. and, withAl, some
what afraid of robbers So he prevailed
upon a young friend, Charley b, to
sleep with him each night. Charley, being
an early riser, was always up and away Of
. morning before any one else about the
house arose.
Sam had an old lady living in the house,
and she was just as full Of inquisitivenesE
as any other woman, and had not the most
exalted estimate Of Sans married tiiellty.
But when making up the bed each morning
she discovered head marks upon two pillows
instead Of one, her suspicious took definite
shape, and she was quite ready to swear that
Sans bed was occupied each night by a
woman as well as himself. Indeed, she
would have sworn to it. Well, she writes
Sans wife letter, detailing her convictions,
arranging for her TO come home Immediately,
ana TO arrive on the midnight train then to
-lip quietly home, and as quietly into her
husbands room, and then-she would be
convinced that her suspicious were not Alto
gether groundiess.
This little programme was carried ost
beautifully. The old lady met the returning
wife at the door, and said "You are in
time-she's here, the nasty thing-in bed
with Sam--in your bed, too, the lmpudent
hussy" The wife became furious, but she
made no noise just then laying aside her
bonnet shawl, etc, she took LAMP, walked
lightly to the door OF her husbands room,
listened, heard talking, began to scream and
pound on the door, and brought hiu out Of
bed in jitfy, and TO the door, "a dishabile
The wife gave no answer to bis Wild IN
quiries as TO what was the matter, aud as 20
what had brought her home so very unex-
pectedIy. She screamed out (: 80, yUu viii
Ian, you scamp: Pve caught you a 'ast.
You could net deceive me Always. Ah, that
vile woman, I'll kill her.
Sam smelt large mice. lie apprecia
:saas :sas sitnsii0a Il once, and played nis part il
mastery manner. "Well, my dear, you
have fairly caught me, and | reckon might
as well confess, and have done with it,"
Sam said, and turning to the bed be cried
ont ''Get up, Mary, it's all up with us, Cor
my wife has come home, and she kp vs. all
about us. Let's ask forgiveness and pro-
mise TO sleep together no more"
Then Charley's head darted oat from an
der the cover, developing an immense pair
Of whiskers-for womsn-and he said :
"Take her away, Sam, can't get up before
her, for have no clothes on but just my
shirt" rhe Jealous wife turned white, then
spotted, then red. She read il al, 10 fact
Sam shrieked out the loudest, broadest guf-
faws; and the old lady, who had followed
the wife up stairs, exclaimed "Well, dld
you ever r.
Sam and his wife retired TO the parIor
while Charley dressed and soon went down
Explanations followed, mysteries were unrA,
veled, Afew tears, some jolly hp-smacking
and the curtain dropped. Sam says his wiz
viii never be jealous Of him again-at leas
20 she declares