The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1868-10-24
From tsPunch."
AN UeLY BARGAM.-A cheap bulldog.

OAAAsNAAAA''
CHANGE IN THE WEATHER.
Pdtetdmilias with a sigh his family have
been to Bou(ogne for the holidays). "lps all
upp'
Bachelor Friend (who has enjoyed these
little dinners). "What's the matterY'
Pdtetamilias. Telegram She says they've
arrived safe at Folkestone, and will be home
about 10'30"
PoIITIcAI PERSUASION AND FoRcE-It is said
that intimidation is the besetting sin OF the
conservatives, and bribery of the liberals.
Perhaps that is the case. Then the conserva-
tive wallops, so to speak, or threatens SO wal
lop the British elector, and the liberal gives
him oats, as it were, and cries gee wo
"LrvERY OF sEHIN'. John Thomas annual
suit
"FAcIL1s AS CENSUS"
Brown (of the Alpine Club, on his return
home from Geneva, buys an Alpenstock).
''Kel nomY Well, you must kuo Y the names
o. your own mountains better than | do
Put down the regular lot, you knOw-Mong
Blopg and the rest of 'em !"
How TO ENSURE Your Sons SUCCESS IN THE
RACE FOR KNowLEDeE.-When he's going to
school, give him good "tip."
SONG FOR A HARVEST HOME.
Dedicated, tophOw permission, To- the Hi0h ChTe',nen
How harvest be over, stead o. taakun his
Let every bold farmer taake his part in
STEAD O. gieun his la6'rers q sklnfull o. beer,
Let un spend on bad acLlng Inc price o. good
cheer
See, PEARSON bedizzened in Papishes' clothes,
Paraadun the niO 5 - DOid ltSrmers ne goes
VIZ lads In their lghtgowns a. singun psalms,
And e-bearup o. banners and nags In their arms.
Behind un fine ladies and gemmen are seen,
Nigh smotnered WI flowers, like Jacks i the
WY roses and lilies an larkspurs SO blue.
wy daylias and daalseS an molly hocks too'
There be others WI turmuts an taturs likewise,
An carruts an pumpkins, amaazun in size;
And melons am peac es ana apples an pears,
AS big as be eaten by Kings an Lord Mares
There be Cargo an Giles Scroggins a.blazun in
WIZ skuil.caps o. scarlet top of their head;
stinkun stun they call incense they're fiingun
Smellun like taller candles when sudden blown
out.
BY way o. fine-nawly pigs head be there,
Bedecked WI PINK riohnns, like maids at fair;
Drest nicely for dinner 'twouId better please me.
Then arter paraadun the nlds as 1 say,
They all goes to Chnieh for TO sing an to pray;
'Tis because their mouths water for Tn peaches
and plums.
Now. when harvest be over, an crops in, dye
For 1 dunno' like mixun play-aotiug an
prayer!
MERRIMAN ON MUMMERY.
ITO The Haydock RetualistS)
Reverend Gentemen:-On the occasion OF
the late total eclipse of the sun, according to
the Calcutta correspondent OF the Times,
"Tuesday was general holiday, and the ma
tiVes signa!ized the SWALLOWING OF the sua oy
demon by the usual drumming, bhrleking, and
blowing of shells, with offerings of rice"
Benighted heather, were they not ? Rice is
SO pagan an offering. There would have been
some sense, now, in wheatsheaves, especially
with the addition of basket OF eggs, pat of
butter, and pigs head. Wouldn't there
think SO. But then, am only CLOWN.
p. S.-Have you got vacancy for a Cru
ciferY Address, Drury Lane.
'SHAM SAMPLE SwINDLE."-An anonymous
writer, in a mask, charges Mr.. Charles Reade
with receiving stolen literary goods, knowing
them to be stolen. This Mr.. Charles Reade
fatty denies, and threatens his accuier with
an action. Pendente Lite, an unprejudiced OBJ
server, can only say that, at all events, Mr..
Charles Reade has brought the subject to a
direct issue, and has not defended his share in
Foul Play by Poultry Evasion.
Coon "PIEoE' OF FURNITURE FOR THEATRICAL
MANAeERs.-A Chest of drawers"
GooD KNIFE FOR FRUT.-"Le Sabre de mon
Pear"
POOR CREATURE!
Nurse-"Wel, Mr.. Charles, how do you
get on in the country 2"
Mr.. Charles-"Why, Hemma, l shan't be
sorry when we returns to town. l amt a
sportin' man, you know; and there's no So
ciety here but fshin' and shootin' ~
GLAND RATS AND WATER RATS. boy in
the Surrey Gallery. "HH have your rats /"
GLASSES ROUND.-Those worn in the eye.
FIRM CONVICTION for life.
, From StFun.o
A NKw TRAoK.-Mr. Michael W. Rosseti ia.
we learn, preparing the next Courtesy Trsct''
for the Early English Text Society. We com
mend the notion to other societies which take
fhair froD ha g