Middletown transcript., 1868-08-22

| cO OtyibS OIL
doubt they never do when they can help
themselves. But the proverb femme Je
0c'H, Dteu te 0ent, cannot be modified in
favor of the sex that has less influence
with the higher powers. A man may de-
sire thing very ardently, and yet tho
gods remain truly inexorable. He is fet-
tered by circumstances much more than
the objoct. of his affections. His love, ut
least, is very rarely I" free as air." Wo
may say that it never is, unless he be
either very rich or entirely without occu=
patton. Even thriving young banker
or rising barristcr can get away for the
indispensable honeymoon only at fixed
seasons Of the year, ,and to take the case
OF the latter, should he engage himself in
the spring, at the very period when We
are told that young mans fancy lightly
turns to thoughts of love, how can no
possibly 60 to the Tyrol or South Italy
III other words, how can he possibly get
married-before the long vacation A
rival, or a pardonable impatience, may
have hurried him into the stop; and tho
consequence is that the engagement must
porforce be one Of six months, instead of
the normal three which was the accurate
and conscientious calculation we Just now
made. Even six months, however, though
long, no doubt, to couple of lovers So
licitous to annihilate time, are in practice
tolerable, and certainly need not be spe=
cially reprobated on the score of ethical ex=
pediency. But when it is a matter Of
twice six months, three times six months,
possibly with perhaps" at the end of
them-wheu, in word, the length of the
engagement becomes indefnite-the saga
cious moralist has right to step in and
shake his head. 1t is not often that he
has to do so, inaamuch as he is now a-days
usually anticipated by person of at least
equal sagacity, the young lady's mamma,
if not by the young lady herself, most
natural proceeding, seeing that where
lover pleads for so long delay he does
so on the preprosterous plea of temporary
poverty, which is, of course, shortly to
disappear.
Sometimes, however, the plea is weakly
listened to, and then we have genuine
instance of long engagement. To the
poor man himself, who has labored SO hard
to obtain the concession, it cannot fail to
be a serious affection of the flesh. Fov
he is, as it were, in the dock, and on his
trial the whole time He cannot help feel
ing conscious that all his acquaintance
atlleast, all his female acquaintances-are
on the point Of saying to him,
and but for consideration for his feelings
would say to him, ''When are you going
to be in a position to marry that poor
girl p He knows that they think the
best days of her life are slipping away in
wearisome waiting for his peeqniary suG=
cess; and at one or two states Of mind he
must, perforce, soon arrive. He must be
made either exceedingly irritable by. o.
exceedingly resigned TO, the situation.
On the first supposition he cannot we'll be
very happy, nor on the second, very fass
cinating lover. He becomes either bur-
den to himself or to other people; either
as nervously anxious as man who
has not yet been accepted, or as Extensively
at home and satisfied abont the matter as
if he were already husband, But it is
the girl who really deserves all our COM
She is bound hand and foot.
and tied to man who is neither alive nor
dead neither lover who draws her, nor a
husband whom she draws. She can think
Of nobody aud nothing else, and yet she
thinks in vain. She is ruined as daugh-
5or and sister, and utterly spoiled as
member of general society +; and yet she
S not wife or mistress IF hvssSseeffiiSSEo
She has given up almost everything, and
,ho gets absolutely nothing in return:
nothing, at least, but robukcs from her
parents for being absorbed in vacancy and
her duties; nothing but Jokes
rom her brothers; nothing but lukeWarm
invitations from her old friends. AT home
he feels that she is there on sufierance;
md abroad she is a superAous nondescript,
situation that ought to be sublime, and
lid commence by being, at any rate, pa
hetic, but before very long is something
more than ridiculous. 1t is positively fun
"; and the sacred affections of the Young
,irl become The sport of every idle wag,
very mercilcss gossip. Even a short en-
,agoment is not the ploasantcst position of
woman's life ). but long one must be
veil nigh insufferable. When married
life does comc-if it ever does-its more
lovel and delicate pleasures have been
discounted, and at what price 1t seems
hard doctrine that there must be no love
Ehere there is not sufficient money ; but
1e must take this world as we find it. and
very limited experience is enough to
onvincc anybody, that it was not made
xclusively or expressly for love. Let us
indulge in the pleasing hope that the next
nc is. And as we know, at least, that in
there is no marrying or giving in mar
iage, engagements can evidently there be
S long as anybJdy could possibly desire.
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THE IMMORTAL MIND.-Daniol Web,