The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1868-09-06
AsLIteral Ttlrr, or Mind.

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81 A Literal Turn or Mind.
al The GALAXY, for September, says:
The Irish bullis the result of fog
in the mind-there is another humor-
GUS method of expression, which is
the result of too much literalness and
.acuteness of mind. ~ PHssl
Human thought and language have
come, of course, from much use, to
run in grooves or runs, but there are
occasionally people who persistently
that has been done before them, and
who are, consequently, all the time
saying grotesque and unexpected
things. No lt
o. OF such character was particu-
larlys practical student, who, at the
examination of the College of Sur
geons, was asked, by Abernethy:
.What would you do if Q man was
blown up with gunpowder?" He re-
piled, i would wait till he came
down." ssTrue, replied Abernethy,
sand suppose II should kick you for
such an impertinent answer, what
muscles would I put in motion?"
The hexors and extensors of my
arm, replied the student, 'tfor I
should Immediately, knock you
\ down" r2a J,it'if
"My son." said an anxious father
once, .tWhat makes you use that nasty
tobacco?" Now the son was O very
literal sort of person, and declining
to consider the question in the spirit
inswhich it was asked, replied, "To
get the, juice, old codger."
& a Alady was once conversing with q
sailor who had suffered shipwreck; {;
and, as she took great pleasure in the
enalyzation of feelings and emotions,
asked him, compassionately. Glow
did you feel, my dear man, when the
cold waves broke over your" But
the seaman knew nothing Of meta
physics, and answered simply, ssWet,
ma'am; very wet"
A small child being asked by a
Sunday School teacher, "What did
the Israelites do after they had
crossed the Red Sea2" answered, "I
don't know, ma'am, but guess they
dried themselves" ~
Queer answers are very often re-
ceiyed by grown people who talk to
children, for the reason that the latter
haye not yet become accustomed to
the Ssnbtleties, and fgurative mean
1ngs and roundabout ways of words,
and, therefore. look at things very
practically. s'Sam," said a young
mother to her darling boy, "do you
know, what the difference is between
the body and the soul? The soul,
my child is what you love with; the
body carries you about. This is
your body, (touching the boys
Z shoulders and arms, )qbut there is
something deeper in. You can feel
it now. What is it?p '.Oh, I know, {"
said he, with o flash of intelligence
in his eye, t'that is my flannel shirt. {"
ga passive verb" said teacher,
sis expressive of the nature Of re-
ceiving an action, as Peter was beat
en- Now, what did Peter dor"
"Well, ], don't know, said the scho-
lar, deliberating, ''unless he hol-
A youth who was being reprimand-
ed for playing marbles on Sunday,
was asked, 'tDo you know where
those little boys go who play marbles
on Sandayp" He had not been suf-
ficiently teught in regard to future
state, and replied, quite innocently,
"Oh, yes. Some on 'em goes to the
common, and some on 'em goes down
to the river" b y
An unexpected bit OF information
Is sometimes ELECTED by this literal
understanding of questions, as when
o Sabbath School teacher was at
tempting to teach very small boy
themeaning Of wages in. the passage.
'"The wages Of sin is death, \ p and
asked him, what does your father
get on Saturday night2" ttDrunk.
ma'an," answered the boy, without
any hesitation. .f't }t 'fF'f - -