New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1868-09-18
planking Mayor Hoffman was eiecteo 70 guar
the city treasury. Is this the way he uoes "
No such Governor for us
TPJFLE TOO HONEST.


among thieves. The uses Of such reputation
are various. When Fagin the Jew, Sykes,
Nancy, and the Artful DOdger caught poor III
tie Oliver Twist, they intended him TO DO the
"honest' part of their business. whenever
the Absent minded Gentleman whose poker
they were relieving Of its wallet should 1eel
their nibbling and turn upon them. they were
to be intently looking at the window, over the
way. or the dome of St. Pauls, while honest
divers pale, meek face was to arrest the anger
of the irate gentleman. When Fagln q Co.
needed to insert small boy in back window
with intent that he should open the front door
to tall Sykes and his gentlemen burglars, and
there was danger that lie might be caught by
the lady of the house in the midst of bis
interesting mission, and the address OF
his partners shook out of him before the
neighborng police magistrate, the hon
esty of poor little Oliver would make
them reluctant to pursue the friends OF
such sweet young man, and II they did MS
simplicity would render their pursuit unavaii-
ing, as he really would not know how to direct
them. At this point the remarkable resem-
blance between the cases of Oliver Iwlst ana
our incorruptible Mayor terminates, very much
to the credit of little divers honesty and the
Mayors availability. Poor Oliver left his gang
of thieves in disgust, while the Mayor remains
ut a salary of Fourteen Thousand year. lie
does exactly what the unsophisticated Oliver
was designed to do, but failed. lie pleases
Fagin, and the Artful DOdger. and Charley
Bates, and Nancy Sykes, and Bill. They boast
of him, toast him, elect him, pay him. And
when the innocent old gentleman who loses his
wallet turns upon the offender, 10! old Fagln
is at home polishing his watches, the Artiul
Dodger is around the corner reading news
paper, Charley Bates is surveying the dome OF
st. Paurs, Nancy Sykes is preparing tea, and
our honest faced Oliver Twist, when grabbed
and brought into court, pleads and proves his
good character, and that he remains among ms
abandoned associates only to reform them
In his reformatory efforts he believes that
speech is greenbacks, but silence is gold. lie
watches their felonious operations, therefore, III
silence We would search his official acts,
yetoes, and messages in vain for any infor-
nation that Fagin, or the "Artful," or any OF
his impenitent friends, ever get their attenu-
ated fingers into the city treasury. For IN
stance, to some it might not seem necessary that
the city should furnish each of our armories
and drill-rooms with As black walnut chairs
costing SAG each. Cannot our brave militia
prepare for the hardships and dangers OF "a
march down Broadway and up again on chairs
ius tri1e less expensivel Fagin and the
"Artful" say not Our honest Mayor thinks
the bill is liberal, but believes the best way to
hush I'D the matter is to sign the ordinance.
The innocent old gentleman Immediately
misses his wallet, and is about to turn upon
the thieves in high dudgeon, when whom
should he confront but an honest Mayor. who
whispers: "Sh- Sill, the thieves have Just
"got around the corner. Take char, sir
"take a chair"
We are paying five millions for new Court
House which is well worth one-tenth OF that
sum. and before it is complete, we are likely
| to pay endless millions more. Though the
Mayor has not vetoed any of these ordinances,
| Jobs, or warrants it is whispered that he has
labored and prayed in secret to get the city let
| off as cheaply as possible. He could not refuse
TO open the front door without offending the
| tall and ugly Sykes, who let him in at the
back window for that very purpose. But hay-
ing let in Mr. Sykes and the gentlemen bur-
glars associated with him, he besought them to
take away no more plumber than they could
| carry. In what better manner could he yind-
cate at once his gratitude to his friends and
the honesty of his character. The honest old
gentleman is astounded to find his wallet gone,
| but poor little Oliver Justly claims reward on
| the ground that, had he not kept an eye on
| them, they would have stolen his watch also.
| Mr. Hoffman was wholly silent on the ques-
ton of $4,000 per annum of interest on the
! city moneys being pocketed by Chamberlain
| Sweeney, who stands in the relation to the
Mayor of the uncle to the nephew, or of cause
| to effect. eve would not for moment be
understood to intimate that this relation re-
| fleets in any manner on Mr.. Sweeney But
| when the innocent old gentleman turned upon
| Mr. Sweeney, just in time to collar him, and
| shook the money out of the boots of that
Young gentleman, his friend, the Mayor, re-
ferred with just and laudable pride to the
benefcent effects of his own and his friends
| generosity in making so munifcent present
| to the innocent old gentleman.
Mr.. Hoffman's honesty has been conspicuously
silent on the reasons why the city should pay
seven millions for printing Transcript of the
citys advertisements, which is facetiously
styled a newspaper. But the Mayor is not
| only honest, he is man of ION fourteen thou
sand q year, most excellent humor. He likes
| to walk down Broadway, wearing the whitest
gloves and the largest moustache in the me-
| tropolis over which he presides, and feeling
that tho city of which he is Mayor can afford,
as o most capital joke, to pay several millions
for printing its advertisements in paper that
has no circulation. The laugh at the ingenuity
of the dodge is well worth the money.
The Mayor has dwelt with eloquent silence
upon the serenity with which our Street Con-
tractor consents to leave our streets in their