The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1868-07-02

or words to that effeck. The announce
ment that Belmont he'd a million and a
half to invest in delegates wuz the
I golden apple wich set us in uproar
Every cuss in the convenshun wanted
to be delegate immejitly, and the
result wuz the entire bilin come tc
blows. he'd the modification nv
seein Bascom with his fingers clutched
in the neck-tie nv the venerable Po-
gram, Issaker Gavitt and McPeter wuz
similarly engaged, while l wuz a doin
my level best to restrain Podhammer
from massacreein me- Had not Joe
Bigler and Pollock arrived opportoon-
ly the entire Democrisy NV the Corners
wood bev bin wiped out on the spot.
1t wuz finally settled by THROWN dice
for it, wich rool ought, by the way, to
be adopted by all Democratic bodies
everywhere. Randall and McCulloch
hev practist it with distinguished sue
cess in maxim their appointments. Say
ther are twenty applicants, or, to get
neerer the trooth three hundred, for
any given place. Very good. The
head NV the department assertains first
eff they are all Dimocrats Then three
hundred clerks are detailed, each clerk
representa- applicant, and they throw
dice, the lowest retirin every throw,
ontil one is victorious, and the man
represented by him gifts the place. 1t
saves vast amount NV labor in the
eggsaminashun NV certifikits NV carak-
ter and fitnis, &c and besides, its
imparshel. All the appointments are
now made in that way at Washington.
We adoptid this device, and / wuz
made delegate and Pogram alternate,
the agreement bein that whatever we
got over expenses wuz to be divided
ekally. Then holy calm succeeded
the storm NV pashen wich he'd ragged.
We go, NV course, uninstructed, for
obvus reasons. If we wuz instructed
wher wood be the objick NV our goin!
1t is not sich that Belmont will 90 fur.
The uncertainty NV the result NV the
convenshun Il say uncertainty, for who
kin tell wich candidate hez the most
moneyO hez occasioned me a vast
amount NV trouble. l hev bin laborin
assidyusly to git our people into frame
Nv mind to be enthusiastic over the
nominee, no matter who it is, or wat
platform he is put onto. To bring this
about / hev he'd em in front NV Bascom's
every mite for week training NV EN-.
| ranged them in row and takin my
posishen in front, give the word like a
melishy ofiiser
"Attenshun !" sez 1. "Ror for Chase
and Morrisey! Together"
"Ror for Cha" but ther they broke
down.
"Parson!" sed Deekin Pogram, 81
cant. Give me week or two to prac-
tis alone by myself, and possibly l kin
make it. The spirit is willin but the
flesh is week"
sit won't do" sed I, sternly, "Ror
for Chase and Ameriky for white
men!"
"Ror!"
"Ror for Chase, Brick Pomeroy and
ekal suffrage" F"
"Ror!" shouted they commercially.
'"Ror for Chase, A. Johnson and
Mayor Monroe !"
"Ror!"
"'Ror for Chase and Repudiashen.
evil that be the slogan if Chase is
?" asks the Deekin.
"It will-down here. 'Ror"
"Ror - yelled they all.
"Ror for Chase, Fernandy Wood,
and death to niggers."
"Ror !"
"Ror for Chase, Pendleton and no
taxashen for a unconstooshnel debt !"
"Ror!"
"Ror for Chase, Hancock and res
torashen on our plan"
"Ror -
'oRor for Hendricks, Chase and
general amnesty"
"Ror!"
every good" sed ! cncouragingly.
'Very goodi yoor fiexibility is more so
than | spozed Remember, my breth-
rem, eff Chase does stick in yoor throats
At the beginnin, that the Chase yoor
holIerin for aint the Chase yoo yoost to
In. Remember that that partikeler
Chase died some time since. He went
out and hezn't bin heard NV since. He
wuz metamorpbosed like a grub. He
she'd his Ablishnism and the noshens
wich impelled yoo to hate him, and ez
ne comes to us, he is nv US. We hev
Din recrooted in that way for some time.
rher aint but one Presidency, halleloo-
", and we're tollably certain TO git,
sooner or later, all them who git their
,ye fixed on that place, but are enable
% put any other part nv their bodies
her. Let us watch and pray. Exer-
Use daily on all these candidates and
III these platforms, for the good Lord
who alone foreknows the decisions of
petit jury, only knows wich NV em
We sheI be compelled to hooray for.
Let us accustom ourselves to all, that
We may enthuse at the beginning and
trike terror to the harts Nv our foes"
And l dismist em with my blessiu.
PErRoLEuM v. Massey, PM.
(Which is Postmaster.)
Mr.. Chase, who expects to be
.nr,,innfnd h,r the namncraou Ia inst