Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1868-01-15

BLoBBs IN MARKEr.-Y Yesterday morn
ing while strolling through the market.
and wondering how much provisions we
could purchase for quarter with beef at
20 cents per pound and eggs at 30 cents a
dozen, our gaze fell upon well known.
long, lean and lanky form, clad in decay,
ed military overcoat, shiney plug hat
/ over which hal passed the SHOWS of many
winters, a leather stock. aud pair of the
old fashioned side board standing collars.
the corners of which seemed. ready to put
out his eyes il he turned suddenly to the
right or to the left. We knew that loved
form instantly. There could be no decep-
tion in that bristly hair, those pig-like
eyes, those running nose, looming above a
row of stumpy teeth like light house on
rocky coast. We knew as we felt heart
throb,. that It, was Blobbs., Blobbs, the
wretched youth who sat down on our best
Smith 6 Conrad tile and didn't get us a
new one. He was cheapening some butter.
Not discovering ourself to the philosopher
we listened to his remarks, as he urged on
the dealer the necessity of bringing the
I prices down to where q man OF ordinary
/ income might buy pound with a weeks
] salary eee5si aiss 5sgev
sod ssGaze upon me, tiller of the SOIL" said
he. "Woulds't thou desire to take all
: a mans earnings for the space of one cal
inendar month, in exchange for aisquare
+. meal? Tell me, thou prince of agricultur-
alists, woulds't thou ?" 'airoQ.' sss- .sss1"s-
.ss 81 wouldst,, said the countryman. h"But
see here, my friend, If you don't like to pay
the price you don't have to buy, you
know" so. ..-az sssl J. (. .ss.i.t.i,o.i
s.Ha, ha" laughed Blobbs, .shear him ye
Gods: Confound him with your thundefs.
Destroy this wretched milker of COWS who
would have man dine on dry bread, and
who asks from 40 to 60 cents pound for
I butter according to the quantity of lard he
works into It. Young man, 1 know thy
secret. Thou buyest lard at u cents, a
pound and by sundry mysterious manipp-
.lations thou transformers it into butter at
50 cents. And must we endure this, we
the hewers of wood and drawers Of water?
: Ne-e-e-v-e-r,n and Blobbs' face assumed a
| ferocious expression. Had it frozen SO, he
conld have made fortune out of Bar
mum. " gs 81 s,9s 1oaa IS q 500 .rsfei {. ia
t.Now see here" said the countryman,
ssbusiness is business. i didn't haul this
butter fourteen miles to hear you call it
Lard, and want you to leave, or I'll hoe
: your row for you. If you don't like my
butter. buy COW and make your own"
Bloobs took out his pocket book and
gazed searchingly into its recesses. That.
alo nf hof II
stepped on it, it was SO fat, ss
- "iGentle Shepherd, am not possessed of
the wealth of the Rothschilds. I never
speeulated, in Government securities, and
cannot count stamps with Jay Cooke. In
other words,r am not millionaire. Not
by no means. Ifa COW could be bought for
thirty-five cents, couldn't purchase four
hairs out of her tail. Why. then, mock my
poverty by telling me to buy COW? Do
as you would be done by. Sell at reason
able rates. Live and let live"
q As he gave utterance to this noble senti-
Ament, he leaned back against a convenient
! wagon wheel, and, shutting both eyes,
after the manner of enraptured singers, he
raised his plaintive voice. and sang this
song of the COW:
'~-ss--"0hi how hard the times are gettIng,---,
Best is he who keeps COW;
: tk O'er m heart cloud is setting. st=
,--5Vf Whocan pay for butter now2 r-
!. .ufl7 In the groceries and the markets, 5-lt
zsi OF the merchants and the vrow, =
aai.l- We, the people are the TARGETS,
~ Who can pay tor butter now =" tttie
Mark the couple newly married, ,sr.z5-z-s
Both regret the marriage vow.
Had they known it they'd have tarried,
They can't ray for butter now
All my greenbacks now going.
ryrE.e And in vain l raise o row. --sar |
ff-5- How my grocery bill is growingl .r z ,
-45,-. Who can pay for butter nowf lffq - :;
s-,-i When think upon my future.
i I'm almost constrained to yow,l 49,.
If live another summer. --,a
$50 ~ will buy or steal cow" s-..---l-s-
As he finished we broke upon his as
,.tohfshed vision. 'sSpiv, my boy" he said,
! .sdon't say that song is original. 1 stole It.
But have you found man who sells benz
zinein quantities less than one quart, who
will trust you for two bowls?" ss7
We knew just such man, we said. :
Is g Come, my boy, take me at once where l
may look upon that specimen of amiable
innocence. That man has confidence in