The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1868-02-23
x1scx11AHpous PARAGRAPHS.

A dentist is not necessarily mad because
he shows his teeth.
What letters can you play upon the best
The p O's to be sure.
Neatness is not gludiness, any more thai
mere words are good sense
A Connecticut joker was recently fined
fifteen dollars for playing ghost.
The best cure for drunkards, says an old
philosopher, is, whilst sober, to ObscrveRa
drunken man.
The grlvest beast is an ass, the gravest
bird is an owl, the gravest fish is an oyster,
and the gravest man is a fool.
In renting farms in England there is often
an arrangement called "a screw which
forces the farmer to vote as the landowner
wishes.
Speak of mems virtues, says Chinese
morllist; as if they were your own, and of
| their vices as=n you We're liable to their
punishment. "
The young Chinese Emperor, twelve years
old, rejoiced in the celestial title OF s. His
High Prosperity" His imperial father was
:. Perfect Bliss"
Plato compared his wise master Socrates,
to the gallipOt OF an apothecary, which had
on the outside apes, owls, and satyrs, but
| within, precious drugs.
>. SO Pa, do storms ever make malt liquor -
"No, child why do you ask 2" because
l heard ma tell Jane to bring in the clothes,
for Il storm was brewing
If you feel little dull ,-stupid, ennuisl,
run out and take Il little oxygen. 1t is q
good drink, very cheap,sand don't require q.
, stamp except from the foot.
Never despise cOunsels from whAtever
|. quarter they may reach you. Remember
r the pearl is keenly sought after in spite OF
the coarse shell which envelopes it. -
A young man who was about Jumping
from a train, while in motion, was deferred
:. by Il reporter who asked him for his mame
age, business, and residence for an obituary
4 item. =
Better waittivc years to go into business
!. upon adequate means which are properly
your own, than to rnsl in prematurelv,
e trusting to loans, indorsemesats, and the
i fOrbearance of creditors, to help YOU
through. Greeley. N~>>S
!. A Iady-resident at one of the fashionable
~ up town hotels in New York says that din
g ner there, and subsequent drawing-room
IS parade, differ only from menagerie perfor-
nance in that at the former they first feed
and then exhibit, and at the latter they first
Y exhibit and then feed =
q A Paris Iandlady requested Christmas
- party on the third floor to cease dancing
as {; mali below them was dying. The
guests ;icquiesced. Returning an hou,
7, later, 9. by lear children" she exclaimed
with the lsost benevolent smile, "ycu NAV
begin again; he is dead :"
"a country geutleman walking in his gar
den saw his gardener asleep in an arb0r
l, - WHAT says the master,~ asleep, YOU
4 idle dog; you are not worthy that the sur
- should shine you.' 50 am truly sensi.
1t BILE of my unworthiness," answered the man
'and therefore i lay myself down in the
N shade"
There is no need of buying umbrellas
3 they cancasily be procured without; thrsly
S Take your stand in Il doorway or n rainy
Is day: AS soon you see IL man with Il nice
umbrella, step out and say to him, I" Sir
beg your pardon, but you have nay umbrel-
:, LAT" Nine times in ten he will surrender il
~ at once, for how does he know-that it was
not you he stole it from
= INDUSTRIOUS PEoPLE.-The young lady
ii reads romances in bed the friend who
n il always engaged when yOu call, and the
y correspondent who cannot find time to an
=; swer your letters -2--------- 4
: GENTEEL PEoPLE.-The young lady who
y let's her mother do the ironing, for fear/ ot
70 spreading her hands the miss who wears ti1
n shoes on rainy day, and the gentleman
who is ashamed to be seen walking with
y his father.
/. HAPPY FoLKs.-A child with a rattle, {
st small chap drumming on a tin pan, school.
IL, boy on holiday, two loyGrs walking BY
- moonlight, u gent imbibihg a sherry cob
IN bier, a boy sucking NV cider through
d. straw, and two county misses over an ict
lie cream.
of KIND louisville man who makes Vol
present you do not want, the friend wht
io gives you SO much advice, the lady who In
er, sist that Won have not made out your din
he ner, the old gentleman who is starving him
- self to lay up money for-you, the shopkepe
who abates the price of the article just be
cause it is you, and the mother who let's tn
he dear child en do as they please.