The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1868-09-05
Miscellanp.



Punch, in the Comic Blackstone and perhaps, we
NAV add, the less the better. Considering the
extreme uncertainty of the law, it is often won
dered at why We find SO many people resOrtin g
TO it? vet there is doubtless satisfaction to both
sides in pursuing what each is firmly convinced
to be the Justice of his eau Sc, in which he looks
to his country q. e., his twelve men in box, or
hi. Judge upon the bench) to maintain him.
"Csrtainty," said Lord Hardwick, sis the mother
of repose and, therefore the law aims at certain
ty" Yet it would be no great sketch OF skeptic-
ism to say that, if this be the laws actual aim,
it very seldom hits it; and most parties who have
often appeared in courts, whether as plaintiff or
defendant, can feelingly testify that law 10 pro-
ductive Of anything but repose
Sergeant Narryatt, who was an eminent
queens counsel, some time after he had retired
from practice, declared that the anxiety of pso-
ple to law was amazing to him.-a veteran s1-
pert in the chicanery of courts. "For my part,
said he, "if any man were to claim the coat upon
my back, and threaten my refusal with . law
suit, he should certainly have it, lest in defend
ing my coat, should find that was deprived of
nav waistcoat also" And the erudite John Sol
den, treating of the uncertainties of equity jurs
prudence, says: Equity is q roguish thing.
Equity is according to the conscience of him that
is Chancellor and, as that is larger or narrower,
20 10 equity The involved and absurd charac-
ter of the statutes adds much to the confusion and
uncertainty that attends the administration of
the law. Lord Stsnhope, to illustrate the care
lessness with which acts of Parliament are pre-
pared, brought forward certain statute in
which the punishment of fourteen years trans
portation was imposed for a particular offence,
land that upon conviction, 0ne-1aIf thereof
should go to the king, and one-half to the inform
er!"
Lord Chancellor Thurlow had once a dispute
with barrister, respecting certain act OF par
lament. Upon investigation, 1T appeared that
the Chancellor was wrong. "Oh, he exclaimed
in his gruff way, "d-n the act l can manage
well enough with the common law; but, as to
the acts of parliament, the devil himself could
not recollect them all
Mr.. Gritty tells of the costly blessing of chan
Gerry the following story. An attorney on the
marriage of his son, gave him $500, and hand
ed him over chancery suit out of his own prac-
tice About two years after, the son asked his
father for more business. Why, gave you that
capital chancery suit" replied the father, "and
then you have got great many new clients;
what more do you want 2" "Yes, Sill" replied the
son, "but wound up the chancery suit and gave
my client great satisfaction, by putting him in
possession of the estate" What you lmprov-
ident fool reioined the old lawyer Indignantly,
"that suit was in my family for twenty-five years.
and would have lasted, at least, as much longer
if | had kept it. You squander the good of the
profession, and l shall countenance you no long
err; rest assured OF that"
Conflicting evidence is one of the chronic diff
fculties of courts and juries. 1t is not every
Judge, however, who can balance it's uncertain
ties as automatically as Mr.. Baron Psrrot.
'Gentlemen of the jury this judge is reported
to have said. in summing up evidence IN q GER
tain CASE "there are fifteen witnesses who swear
that the water-course used to flow in ditch on
the north side of the hedge; on the ether hand
gentlemen, there are nine witnesses who swear
that the water-course used to flow on the south
side of the hedge. Now, gentlemen if you alb
stract nine from fifteen there remain six wit
nesses wholly uncontradicted; and recommend
you to give your verdict for the party who
called those witnesses"
Many good things are told of Lord Ellenbor-
ough, who had a caustic habit of speech. Lord
Kenyon was distinguished for his money-making
and penurious disposition; and one day at cab
met dinner, it being reported that Lord Kenyon
was very low and about to die, Peterborough ex-
claimed "Die Why should he die? What could
10 get By hati
Mr. Jekyll, who rose to be attorney general,
had great and uniform flow of spirits, while
Erskiue with his irritable constitution, was sub
ject to attacks of hypochondria. He once ad-
dressed Jekyll, in the kings bench court, COM
planning that he had severe pain in his bowels,
and had tried every remedy without getting any
relief "a pain in your bowels, brother Erskine,"
said Jekyll, "a pain in your bowels" Get your
self made attorney general, Erskine and then
you will have no bowels at all !"
Chancellor Thurlow was VIGOROUSLY what is
called 'althorough customer" in his speech. Be
ing sent for one day to preside in the House of
Lords when he was very busy, he answered the
usher who told him the Lords were waiting, with
his accustomed growl. The usher soon returned,
and repeated 81 must have your lordships an
swer; the Lords are waiting" Oh the
Lords !" cried Thurlow sharply fixing look of
rage upon the usher. "You may d-n the Lords
as much as you please" returned the indomitable
official: "but I'm ID, were you twenty times
the chancellor. if you shall damn me-" Thur
low quivered for moment with establishment at
the audacity of mere servant thus boarding the
chancellor; then his hard features relaxed with
. smile, rs he exclaimed, rising from his seat,
"By Jove! you are a bold fellow; | Will go
now"
On another occasion, Thurlow found y load of
paving stones thrown down opposite his door by
an Irish carman. Opening upon the poor fellow
with torrent of curses, he ordered him to move
the stones away instantly. "Where shall take
them 80, your honor 2" the pavior inquired.
stake them to hell, you scoundrsl." was the
rather blasphsmous answer. Have a care, your
honor put in the quck-witted Hibernian;
"don't you think, now, that if L took them to the
other place, your honor would be loss likely to
fall over them Z"
The same Thurlov, when Lord Chancellor,
made An uncommonly pathetic speech in P.rlia-
ment, on occasion Of George III. beisg overt~ken
by illness. He closed by deep professions Of bic
loyalty and attachment and by saying, "Whsn
forget my sovereign, may KY God forget ne )"
whereupon John Wilkes, the notorious. is said to
have cried out God forget you. He'll zee You
id firstw