davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
NOT TIRED OF LIFE.
BY TOM G. HARBoCGH.

I heard little School-boy shout,
Who sportrd on the heather,
never will grow tired of life,
Iwant to live forever.
love that happy. little child.
And meet Kim year from year;
saw him -wine the heliotrope
Within his first loves hair.
"Oh Kate" h" said, ~ wish that death
On earth would part MS never;
For would hear thy merry voice
Forever and forever"
Again I saw him when he stood
With his bride before the altar;
l heard him take the sacred vow,
In love he'd never falter.
And then he whispered to his love.
Words spoken on the heather.
81 never will grow tired Of thee
Oh NAV we live forever
That lovely boy is now a man,
And years have fitted by;
He wends his way to the old church-yard
Where wife and children lie.
His hair is like the driven snow,
His form to age is given;
"Oh now he cries. I'm tired Of life,
want to go to heaven"
And thus it is with all of us,
when youths fair sun is bright;
When all is sunshine, all is day.
We never think Of night
But when old age o'crtakes our frames.
And we are bent and gray;
How anxious are we then to go
To the realms of endless day
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
THEnAILY TRIRIrNE

has been the leading political newspaper
the country that its special features
tOn 1t contains the fullest and most reports
proceedings in Congress and the State Legislatures
summaries of from all quarters of the globe
dence from all the principal centers Of intelligence home
and abrOad letters from travellers foreign lands
books dramatic, musical and fine criticisms literary
scientific, and religious miscellanies and all the
items up frst-cass daily paper 1t is printed
with better and clearer type than other daily journal
America published every morning. Sundays excepted
Terms, $40 a year; s. for six months.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

Josh Billings says: BOOSTERS do but very lit
tie household work. They won lay emmy eggs,
nor try tew hatch emmy; this satiSfys me that
there is sum truth in the NEUROLOGICAL ackount
ov the ROSTERS fust origin. Yu can't get a
rooster to pay emmy attenshun few yung one.
They spend their time in growing, strutting,
and occasionally find worm, which they make
a remarkable fuss over calm up their wifes
from a distance, apparently tew t~eat them, but
just as the hons git thare. this elegant and elab-
crate cuss bends over and gobbles up the NOR
sol
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

A YoUNd gentleman ard lady of New Alba
ny Indiana, made novel bet on the Presiden,,
tial election. In case Grant should be elected
the young man agreed to marry the lady, and
If Seymour, the young lady was to marry the
gentleman. The bet was a good one Tor the
yonng lady.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
Testimonials.

Hon. GEO. w. WOODWARD,
'uisi Justice Of the supreme Court Of Pa, writes;
4 find LA, =, Philadelphia, March 20, 1853. , |
4, N IioonahO Ger man Bnters' IS good
e' useful IN diseases A oCthe d,ges,ive organs
n, MI IS great benefit IN cases OF debility, and
wi nervous action in the system,
iours truly, GEO. W. WOODWARD
Hon. JAMES THOMPSON,
Judge of the Supreme Court Of Pennsylvania
n eon.:l r, - . Phlladelph phia, April ", 1863.
ln,c, hOohahd SHERMAN BItIeTs' a VALUABLE
'I'NE In case OF attacks OF Indigestion or Dyspep-
can certify this from my experience Of Il.
'u'' win respect, JAMES THOMPSON.
Hon. GEORGE SHARSWOOD,
'u''ee Of the Supreme Court Of Penn. writes:
all Philadelphia, June lst 1862
i.rwso s;,,u Oond bv exp ~ erence that Hooaands
PsPas symptoms ny TG. sGGd S!eey 'o"i1 relieving
GEORGE SHARSWOOD.
FROM REV. f. D. FENDALL,
Il have t Editor, Christian Chronicle Philada.
IOaand'. uefiVsd decided benefit from the use Of
&seomoae herman BiIlers, and feel It ny privilege
n are "a :hem as a most valuable tonic, 10 all
&,,s. suuerlng from general debility, or from
Vng from arrangement Of the liver:
AOurs Truly, L D. FENDALL.
H0";ua.e the Druggist says that he has sold large
Neha, ~. VI ihe Biiters, and has never sold medl'
Hnu,S save more universal satisfaction. lie taxes
recommending it to his customers
Ats,sanl0 ION .-HOOAand's Germ an Remedies are
H,KSneiliied See that = the signature of C. M
/ O,bo.s on the VT A,pper Of each bottle
HmaO psl Office, and Mandatory at tn
8h,s pnedlcIne Store, No 63I ARCH street, PhIla
d CHAS. M. EVANS. ProDrietor.
Formerly C. M. JACKSON a. Co.
Aha,on PRICES
herman Bitiers per bottle, 81
Haa,,u- " half dozen,
Hh sO% %erman Tonic. put up in quart botlie
Ha npe' bottle, or half dozen for 81 SO.
N4,in so' forget to examine we'll the article yo
4 "0fOer to get the genuine.
Dpuoo FOR SALE BY ALL
q NoGGlS'rS AND STOREKEEPERS.
E Rnl. EVERYWHERE.
ssS.,s :: P. HoFFECKER, Smyrns, Del.
II '' is6s-ly'
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
HoOflamd's German Ritters,

HOOFLAND'S GERMAN TONIC,
II pared by DR. G. Nj. JACKSON,
PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Thltyfve years since they were first introduced
this country from Germany, during which time
Hey nave undoubtedly performed more cures, and
aaeftIed suffering humanity IN greater extent, than
~ olher remedies known TO the public.
These remedies Will effeclually cure Liver
EoGplant, Jaundl e, MNDyspepsia. Chronic or
3sfvOu1 Debility Chr n ' onIc DIarrhea. Disease
the Kidneys. and all Diseases arising from a
8BOrleted Liver Siomach oY IntestInes
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

BETsEY, go down and stur up the apple
sauce. Betsey approached the huge ketIIa
the above named article. Why,
marin, what is this?" she asked, fishing up
black substance, "lor for me If thore nin't
that liSter-plaster that cum d off my back
had sarched and sarched for that air !"
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

ASAD SToRY.-In 1853, Mrs. Matrina Derr,
whose husband had died in Germany, leaving
her in destitute circumstances, came to this
country and was again marricd-this time to
one ROsenbaum of New York. BY him she
was deserted about month after the marriage,
and thrown again upon the world utterly deSti-
tute. She cOntrived, however, to support her
self respectfully, and, moreover, was enabled
out of her earnings to employ detectives to
search for the missing Rosenbaum The search
proving fruitess, and being assured by law
yer Of this city that her second marriage Ito
ROSenbaum) was null and void, because per-
formed according to the ritual of the Roman
Catholic Church, she contracted to a third mar
riage, choosing one Plus Rcible. Her third
choice was decidedly worse than the second
and she eventually left him at Erie where they
went to reside after marrage), and came to
this city. Scarcely had she made her appear
ance in this city when husband No. 2 (ROsen-
baum) preferred charge of bigamy against
her, and she was incarcerated in the Tombs,
from which she was released on a writ of ha-
bedS corpus, but not until her sufferings had af-
fected her mind to such an extent that it was
found necessary to send her to the asylum on
Blackwell's Island, where she found that hus-
band No. 3 (Reible) had robbed her of all her
property in this city and returned with it to
Erie. To that place she followed him, and
made complaint against him for robbery. He
was arrested and the goods returned to the
wrOnged woman, but in revenge he now threat
ems to cause her arrest for bigamy. So the
case now stands, and it is extremely doubtful
whether, in the event the charge is made, the
poor woman, whose action was evidently the
result of ignorance rather than of design, car
be saved from undergoing the usual punish
ment for bigamy. " Y. Tribme
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
WHOLE NO. 722

MARK TWAIN ON JOHN ALLEN. .-Mr. Twain
thinks John Allen "lost ram, and adds:
" Let us be consistent, if VIC are nothing else,
and surely there is little of the sheep in John
Allen, lost or otherwise. Tommy lIadden
evidently has Mark Twain ssympathy Al.
other person, hungry for fame and jealous Of
John Aliens brilliant fortune advertised in
ill-tempered language that in the matter of au.
iul and deliberate wickcdncss, the hoasted John
Allen was an innocent lamb to HAN, and pro-
ccCded to prnvp it by series of evidences,
either one of which ought to be sufficient to
damn him without even glance Mt the Others.
This man was naturally incenSed at the injus-
tice that had been done him, and outraged by
the spectacle Of another man wearing laurelS to
which he himself was alone entitled. as the
guerdon of long lifetime earnestly and unset
fishly devoted to the commission of peculiarly
revolving crimes. To such a mind, the rehec-
ton that after all his life had been a failure:
could not be other than agoniZng He invited
attention 20 his case-inSisted on throwing his
doors open to praycr--faunted his superior
sins before the public, and went on railing at
the feeble impoSter, John Allen.
! About this time the Wickedcst Man hi II ef
arrived a tall, plain, bony fellow, with goo'
natured look in his eye, a Water st. air a.
about him, and a tonch of Irish in his face.
| lie stood in the door, and a crawl Of vagahon 9
on the sidewalk gaprd and stared at him in
STUPID admiration. He said
Don this sort of thing ever stir up the de.
vii in you or may be yon don mind it, being
used to being notoriou~?'
l thanked him for the compliment, and said
| wasn't notorious enough TO have become an
object for people to stare at
"NO-but if that So you re lucky. They
stare at ne till | want to knock there heads off.
/ Why, they come here and march right in and
ask newell, you stand off there and III show
you how they do. There, now, that's about
right. p"
Then the speaker stepped into the street and
returned with his hat in his hand, and walked
up gingerly and said:
g Are you the wickedcst man in New York 2"
"Yes"
John Allen?'
"Yes.'
" You?'
eyes"
Good GolI'
And then they walk around me, this way,
and then Sidle around t'other way, and exam
inc the back of my head, and stoop down and
feel my legs. And then they go off mumbling
to themselves, as if they cant possibly under
stand it, anyhow. Now you know that both
cred me like sin, at first but it don't now.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
DEBILITY.

|eiHlIng from any cause whatever; Prostration Of
The System induced by Severe labor, Hard
ships, Exposure, Fevers, &c.
here is 10 medicine exlant equal to these rome
Is IN such cases. A tone aud vlgOr is impaired to
Il whole sysIen the appetite Is strengthened, food
sIoYed, The stomach dgests properly, the blood Is
fhed, the com pie xIOn' becomes sound and healthy.
Il yellow tinge is eradicsted from the eyes, bloom
gwen to the cheeks, and the weak and nervous in
i l5d n becomes strong and healthy being.
renOns Advanced IN Life anc feeling the hand Of
aeReghng heavily upon them, with all It's attend
Ills, will find in lhe use Of this BIFFERS or ,he
ONC, an elixir that will insti new life into their
'n' restore in a measure the energy and ardOr Of
youthful days, build up their shrunken forms,
give health and happiness 10 their remaining
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

The Major says the reason that the young
lady gave who first introduced the Grecian
bend at Saratoga was that she wished to have
place on which to rest her poodle dog, when
the dear little creature got tired.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

SHOE AND STOCKING GAZERs-By Hattie
HdtefM-l am really ashamed of those men
who are always hanging around the street-cros-
sings, stair ways, post offices, and other public
places, to get glimpse of female foot handle.
You have heard Of star gaZers? Well, L will
call those fellows shoe-and stocking gazcrs, and
the way they stare ladies shoes and stockings
in the face, is worthy nober object.
Now |, and every other woman, know that
there is not woman in creation, who posses
ses handsome foot and ankle, that does not
like to display it. but she don t want every fell
lew peeping tor glimpse of it.
l have a great deal more respect for man
who will step up to lady, and ask her to show
him her foot than | have for sneaking fell
low who tries to steal glimpse for in the for
mer case, you could box his ears, if you choose
to do so, but in the latter, you could only
make faces at him. ] don t care how much
fellow looks at my face-our faces were made
for public exhibition; but for Heavens sake,
fellow, don go peeping round at my feet it
makes me feel mean somehow it lowers me in
my own estimation, to know thst so many fell
lows have look" at my ankles.
1t IS not from any extra modesty, but | al
ways speak out when anything displeases me-
Now, you fellows who are so f0pd of shoe and
stocking gazing, go home and go to work earn
dollar and give it to the first dry goods deal
cr You meet, for the privilege of examining his
stock of CATERS, hosiery hoop skirts and bal
morals; it will be great deal more honorable
than the rrac ic' Of looking at such articles
for nothing. and it would save us great deal
of annoyance besides. If lady is obliged to
go out in wet weather, she must either let her
skirts drag in the mud and slop, or expose her
ankles to the gaze Of every vulgar street loafer
who may choose to peep We don't look at
the gentemen's feet in this way; why should
| they annoy us SOP
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23


WESTERN MEN.-The Western character
develops freedom and takes in large calcula-
tiOns. This is more true of the man of Wes-
tern cities than the farmer or frontier man,
but still the character applies to all. \ West
ern man thinks nothing of going ten or fifteen
hundred miles, and has no traditional feud
with any class of jew or Gentle. The ee-
mentS of various nationalitieS flowing together
westward form strong and tolerant cOmmu-
ntv. If a man out West has his horse stolen,
he mounts another and traces the thief; shoots
him if he can. The extending praires, inn
mense lakes, grand rivers seem to enlarge the
whole conception Of things. The big farm
yields thousands of bushels of grain. The
Western man may have twenty horses q hun
drcd mules and a thousand head of cattle
grazing in his pastures, and five hundred pigs
fattening in his fields. lie reads the prices
current; knows all that is going on; forms his
own opinions, and is loud AMI bold in the eX-
preston of them. He is a man of patient
courage, who will lose thousands of dollars by
the fall of the market, and make less account
Of it than he would of the laming of favorite
horse or the loss of a faithful dog. If he
doesn't turn his loss off with laugh, and is
pushed to speak of it, you may see the geam
of stern grit flashing from his eyes, as he tells
you he will do better next time He is full OF
reckless and murcurial daring. A< impulsive
as the Southerner, and yet practical in all
things, ne sees and takes always the short cut
to his end Feeling about the sacred charac-
ter of ancestral acres never diSturbs the mind
of man whose possessions were reclaimed
from the wilds but yesterday, and may be left
tomorrow. Whatever he has he will sell and
whatever you own he is willing to buy, prOvid-
ing he can make some I" boot" on it. With
him all things were made to buy and sell. A
1 Il Al,
least idea of the strange character of the trans
action, how he had " traded off a Bible for a
plaguy good fiddle" If any thing on you OF
about YOU strike his fancy, he will at once Offer
to buy it, and has no notion that certain pieces
of property mayn't be for sale.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
NOTICE.

sawe established fact that fully One.half Of the
te portion of our population are seldom IN
4 cyOyment OF good health, or, to use their
I eIPresslon, " new g Aer feel WE'LL" They are
4 sud' devoid of all energy, extremely. nerv-
and have no appetite.
'hs class OF persons the Bltters or the Onic, is
eally recommended
WEAK AND DELICATE CHILDREN
made strong by the uss Of either of these reme-
bout fail
aOusands Of certificates have accumulated in the
S Oi Ihe proprietor, bat space will allow Of the
,cauon OF but few. Those, il will be observed
% ~sn OF note, and Of such standing that they must
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

WHOEVER saw the pale of society" run.
ming over with the milk of human kindness?"
If so, where was the cream of the joker"
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

When may loaf of bread be said to be in
habited? When it has a little Indian in il.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

"Ballast for the Grecian Bend" is adyertis.
ed in New York store window. .l..
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
THE WEEKLY TRIBUNE

continued circulate greater number Of copies than
newspaper country We appreciate
and retain it, Its previous attractions will be
increased The main features of WEEKLY
will agriculture literature politics. and the markets. with
the latest summary the daily We have made special
its usefulness agricultural jour
nal The Farmers Club will be fully reported and special art
ce on agricultural topics contributed by the best writer's No
farmer who till the soil with profit and to know the
constantly made in the science Of his calling a
lord to neglect the advantages Of like THE WEEK
TRtBCNE especially when unites with agriculture other
features Of and profit. The WEEKLY TRIBUNE
ain summary OF all that appears in The DAILY and SEMI
WEEKLY editions while in addition 1t made to address itself
10 the the great farming class Reviews OF all the
new publications. and of all that new In music and the fine
letters from all parts the wOrdsome Of them OF
interest to the farmer showing the of agriculture
in other editorial all topics Of home and
foreign interest together with full and carefully reported
por of the markets. will be furnished from week week. and
At lower that Of in America. BY
the policy WEEKLY TRIBUNE has already attain
ed its present commanding influence and circulation
enter with to readers that
no pains and expense will be spared to give II still greater
usefulness power and TO make II welcome visitor
freside in the land
The Editor Of TIE TRIBUNE purposes to write during tn
year 1862 elementary work Political Economy whcre
the policy Protection to Home Industry will be expaine
and vndcated This work will first be given to the publ
issues Of THE TRIBUNE and will appear
all its editions DAILY. SENT-wEEKLY. and WEEKLY.
We will thank those who think that the influence Of tn
TateryE conduccs the profit and well being people
aid us in extending its circulation;
, TERMS UF TIE WEEKLY TRIBUNE.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

If five and a-half yards make Pole, how
many will make Turkey2'
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

When Apollo dipped Pan into the sea, what
did he come out liks7~ Answer.-A dripping.
pan.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

A LITTLE tumbcr will often throw down 0
big man.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

ODD YANKEES James Ruton.-A GU
rious thing about New England is the variety
of eccentric characters to be found there. In
almost every town there is a farmer or mcchan-
ic who has addicted himself to some kind Of
knowledge very remote from his occupation.
Here you will find shoemaker in little shop
(which he locks when he goes to dinner or to
the post-ofiice, much to the Inconvenience of
customers, who has attained celebrity as bota-
mist. In another village there may he wheel
wright who would sell his best coat for rare
shell and, not far off, farmer, who is pref
ty good gcoOgist, and is forever pcckng away
at his innocent rocks. Again you will find a
machinSt who is enamored of large paper"
copies of standard works. and rcioiccS in the
possession Of rarities in literature which he can
not read. | know an excellent steel plate en-
graver, who, besides being a universal critic, is
particularly convinced that the entire railroad
system of the world is wrong,-ticS rails, dri
ving-wheplS axles, oil boxes, everything, and
employs his leisure in inventing better devices.
Then there are people who have odd schemes
of benevolence, such as that Of the MasSachu-
sets farmer who went to Palestine to teach
! the Orientals the true system of agriculture,
and was two years in finding out that they
wouldn't learn it. There are moroSr men and
! families who neither visit nor are visited and
! there is. occasionally, a downright miser, of the
ancient type, such as we read of in old maca-
zines and anccdote books. There are men,
too, of an extreme ecccntricity of opinion.
think there are in Boston about a dozen as
complete, immovable, if notmaignant. Tories
as can be found this side of Constantinople, )
men who plume themselves upon hating every
thing that makes the glory of their age and
country. And, speaking of Boston, n,-solid
sensible BostOn,-what other city ever accom-
plished feat so eccentric as the production Of
those twin incongruities, George Francis Trair
and the Count Johannes ?-Atianttc Monthl
for JdnUary.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

Ten copies, to address, in one order Is 90
And one copy extra.
Twenty copies, to address, in order Is 90
And one copy to geter-up of the club
Eltty copies, to one address. in one order so 90
One hundred copies to address, in order 100 90
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

The hest place to perform the Grecian B, nd
is over the wash tub
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

from her drunken parent and as she continues
the last two lines, Come home" ETC.. the
other curtain is drawn aside, and we next see
the child lying stretched out on it's mothers
lap, and as it just raises its little head, and
tails back with gasp, with the lime light re-
Hecting, strongly upon it, there was a reality
about the whole terrible to view. SObs were
heard from all parts of the hall, coming from
the female portion of the audience, while tears
trIckled down many rough male check. We
have seen Susan HOpely, y 1.-The Stranger"
Jane Shore, ;" e" East Lynn, and other affec,
tive pieces played but never before did we
witness such a scene of general crying. The
principal feature called to mind the picture of
the Sister of Mercy" with the dying child
in her lap, and the death was fearfully natural.
Even the lady who sang the song was affected,
and could scarcely proceed with the third
verse
Father, dear father, come home with now.
The clock in the steeple strikes three!
The house is so lonely. the hours so long,
For poor weeping mother and me.
Yes, we aone-poor Benny is dead,
And gone with the angels of light!
And these the very last that he said
i want to kiss papa-good night"
Come home, etc.
| Again the drop rose, disclosing little MARY
on her knees appealing to her father, who
with the pot elevated, is in the act of striking
her with it as she sings, ''Come home, anC
then the back curtain draws aside, showing tn,
mother praying over child coffin But nov
the sObs burst out still more freely and two
females were carried out fainting The seen,
was truely narrowing, and we gladly turned
our eyes away.
An additional verse was sung about poo
Benny being with the angels above. The drol
rose the father, sober now, is weeping owe
the coffin with the mother, and little Mary OF
her knees, singing & Home, home, father, dea
father come hOme!" There - said a work
ing man by our side as he heaved a sigh of re
lief, Mr. SpurgeOn never preached better ser
mon than that" an expression to which W
gave a hearty assent, and then left the hall.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
TO MAIL SUBSCRIBERS.

Ora co,y one year. 81 issues 80 90
FiW c;rs to names Of subscribers at POst-OGice
& ennirs TO names Ot subscribers POstice 10
Aud one cory extra tn the gotter-up Of the club
Twenty copies. 10 naD'"S OF Subscribers at one Post
Ohcp ~ 90
AMI nnc ropy extra TO the Rettcr-up ~ the club.
Fty copies 10 names Of subscribers one Post cs IS %
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23

Dpuo. FOR SALE BY ALL
"oGGlSrS AND STOREKEEPERS.
h,,,., EVERYWHERE.
asS,,s' P. ): ?. IoFFECKER, Smyrna, Del.
'"'s, ls6s-lY.
Smyrna times., 1868-12-23
H0UFLANJS GERMAN BITTER'S,
AND
HOOfiand's German Tonic.

The Great Remedies for Diseases of the
IVER, 5 TOMACH, OR DIGESTIVE ORGNs.