Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1868-1875, 1868-11-05
HUMOROUS.

Small women are noticeable for the
greatness Of their.sighs.
The man who has nothing to DO il No
better than the woman who has nothing
to wear Both are very generally empty
headed sort Of creation.
There was y presentation uptown
yesterday. A gentleman presented his
regards TO = lady. The ceremony was
accompanied by the usual speech-mak,
ing
Miss PipPius says that tine best thing
that most Of the young gentlemen who
call At her house could take would be
their leave, and its merit would be in
creased IN proportion 10 the elrliness of
the period ut which it IL taken.
Scene at q dinner-table, 1T which
clergyman Is present LlnIlady-"Mr.
ChOker, will you say grIcs2' Little boy
at the foot Of the tabIe-"Mamma, ! say
beaus-Want some beans don't want
any grace.
Rather a severe comment on summer
tourists was that of the stage driver at
Lake George, who being obliged to sit on
the foot>bOard from the crowd Of pas
sengers, was hailed by a gentleman with,
"Why don't you sit on one of the travel
ing bags, driver p wall, | would, but
they carry a bottle in EN- now, IA it
hurts Teller
It is said as the twig Is bent the trees
inclined Some of the young Indies
about town viii grow qHeerily If the
Greecian style prevails very long.
The Hartford CO1TEHt says there are
more deacOns in Weathersfield than in
any other place in Connecticut The
other day a well known deacon went to
the steamboat wharf to see 4 friend of,
and as the boat started the friend said.
"GOOd-by, deacon; whereUpOn twelve
men who stood upon the wharf immedi-
ately tipped their hats and responded,
"GoOd-by, sir
Disease is simply obstruction. 1t isso
il business as we'll as the body Stop,
or partially stop thing, and trouble fol
lows. This principle applies even to
lady in the street-if you don't know
her.
An Out-spOken clergyman, in an article
in the Christian Register, thus aLudes 10
people about table, each pretending t.
be busy at something. | saw at a glance
the truth. I looked about until | dis
covered the hiden pack, and then drew
it from its hiding place, and put it upon
the table, and requested them to finish
their game; and once / let a man hot
punch gloriously cool because he choose
to put it behind him where he could Mt
see it, but | could, rather than OWE up
like a man. Once, too, detected grim
aces in a truant glass, as came into the
parlOr, and | amused myself with the
contrast between the truth ofthe looking
glass and the lie Of the lip never
called again.
81 don't have any good luck" Fudge
What do you expect, you mere grumbler2
Is the world to turn from its way and
business to sweeten you up, put you on
your pins, and then return to its affairs
Not if it knows itself aId the popular
prejudice is that it has some acuuaintance
in that line Ifyou expect luck" as it
is termed, without working like a good
fellow for it, you viii simply he disap-
pointed And Won ought to be. Ii would
be nothing else but sWindle. Luck IL
q product, not a chance. IL Is born Of
toll; does not fall ready at hand Ir
comes to those who work and win. and
not to those who lazily wait There il
nothing more foolish than for young men ,
to believe in luck It IS a fsith without
foundation, and sadly ruinOus in it, con-
sequences.
The resemblance Of some people to
dogs is thus illustrated major T
was u Paymaster in the army, an old
newspaper editor, q man Of vast acquire
ments and brilliant abilities. He was on
duty in Cincinnati during the war, and
for his amusement bought a choice dog
Of some kind or other Of there is any
choice among dOgs) There was q young
man, of the genus puppy, who had great
desire to cultivate the Majors aCquaint-
ance, much to the latters annoyance.
As kind Of entering wedge to friend
ship, the young fellow hit upon the
fehcitOus plan Of inquiring after the
Majors dog whenever he met him. The
latter bore it for sax or eight days, until
his patience gave out At last, one morn
ing the fellow came up with his usual
salutatiOn Major, how's your dogY To
which the Major answered promptly,
Quite well, | thank you, how are goug'
The question was never repeated
William, thee knows never call any
body names but, William, if the Mayor
of the city were to come to me and say,
Joshua, want thee to find me the
biggest liar in all Philadelphia, would
come to thee and put my hand on thy
shoulder, and say to thee, William, the
Mayor wants 10 see thee.