Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1868-10-16
BoHxr,Ax JAoxALs.

Journalism" wherein he advanced the
astounding theory that man must learn
something before he can write. In this
age Of eulig htenment and progress, when
everybody knows everything, To even
hint such thing is supremely ridicu'
lous. What amount Of lore does news
paper man" needf Should he be
orammed with wise saws like grave
digger or smart sayings like clown Z
Should he be Learned in the law" like
q Judge, or in the moral code" like
preacher2 Or should he have a smat-
terisg of everything like a parrot, that
he may make the groundlings laugh
Not at oil. He may be as empty Of wit,
humor, Establishment and waggery as
Toby, the "well-learned pig" and yet
make good newspaper man. Amt
it the simplest thing in the world to
transform ones self into q Bohemian
Jackal, and essay the construction oil
ideas2 The chopping of sausage-meat
is not simpler. The Jackal furnishes
mental aliment to the million in
an easier, quicker, spicier, smoother
and softer manner than the hotel
cook furnishes stomach stuff, and with
less pain, perspiration and headache.
Why, as Queen Elizabeth would say,
odds-wots there's no trouble in the task
at all; it's as easy as wringing out
a tubful of clothes, and might be per
formed by my aunts washer-woman.
The mode and manner can be picked
up" as readily as the system Of planting
potatoes, sowing corn, moving hay or
digging bitches. The only acumen
necessary is to know how to place few
words in rows, and draw your structure
to m end-not as brick-masons do, up
wards, but downwards, after the fashion
of the architects of Lagado, whom the
imperturbable CULVER had the pleasure
of witnessing, and whose labors put him
| in mind of the bee and the spider.
Men who seldom think are generally
simple but the Bohemian Jackals are the
jolliest of the jolly. They have so little
to do that they are always laughing,
always increasing in lard. Their GUS
tomary occupation of driving the
goose quill at low.pressure rate is
so enticing that every Bottom, in
a fit of emulation, seizes the
mighty weapon of little men," and
slashes away at sentences dd HbituDs
until some mischievous Puck decorates
him with the head Of jerusalem steed,
and he runs away amazed at his Own
image, bis high-born hopes withered,
| like sweet-potato vines after heavy
frost The Jackals of course laugh at
all this; still men Of every other pro-
fession, trade and calling in life try the
quill, because it's so simple and easy to
write. For it the warrior unbuckles his
armor, doffs his plumes, throws aside his
helmet, and hangs up his sword in
monumental mockery;" for it the actor
turns his back upon applauding multi
tudes, gives up the glitter of the stage,
the fascination of music, and the excite
ment of the mimic art; for it the artist
laws aside his brush, neglects the color
ing of hair or Clouds flesh or heritage,
landscape or figure. So when everybody
runs into Journalism as readily as a
| Newfoundland dog runs into water, there
can be no difficulty in becoming a news
paper man." It's as easy to write words
as to lay down the Ncolson pavement,
and less laborious. Any one who tries
| it will find it so.
The experience of "this child is that
the labor of the Bohemian Jackal is the
lightest and spciest kind Of amusement.
It is almost impossible for one unac-
quainted with the undertaking to form
an idea how pleasant it is To sit on
bank of violets all day, breathing odors,
| is nothing to it; to sit under mulberry
tree. and talk soft sweetness into the
willing ears of gushing damsel, isn't
half so heavenly; to sit in your grand
| mothers lap, and listen to her tales OF
| Jack in the Beanstalk, Jack the Giant
| Killer, and Bluebeard, isn't near so
sweet. Forsooth, there's no employment
under the sun so cheerful, so sprightly,
| 40 void of ennai One can hold out at
| it night and day without blinking; can
run down the sun, moon and stars, and
never feel sleepy, tired or cross. SO
many kind sentiments are strewn about
us every hour, that we always dwell in
| Paradise; SO many ssvory tit-bits come
| to us through doors and windows, that we
live on ambrosia, the food of the gods;
go many are SO well pleased with all we
do and don't do, that the blandest ze-
phyrs continually play around our head,
and the richest incense steals into our
olfactory- box so gently as to make US
believe we are always before the high al
tar Of purity. Amt we jollyP
Who's invited to as many parties as we
are, free of expense, and without the aid
| of puff Who tastes as many liquors
as we do gratis, without saying a word in
praise of the quality or of the giver Who
receives as many presents and pieces OF
bride.cske as we do, without compliment
| ing the sender or dropping gems OF poesy
at the feet of the bride No one. We're
Jolly all over, all under, every way. De-
string pinespples or pears, they come to
us with wish; needing smash or
"julip," they appear before our beaming
ewes in a twinkle; longing for a cigar, it
mons through the desk like the ace OF
SHADES popping out of wizards card
box. The cap of Fortunatis couldn't
bring us more comforts, more riches,
more nice things, than our greasy goose
quill. Who, then, wouldn't be Bohe-
milan Jaekal, to be admired, beloved, fed,
iunkied and fondled by generous, pious,
gracious and benevolent world2 0, it's
80 Jolly, SO nice, SO easy, so simple Try
il, my boy, and see how you'll like it.
YOU r TALLER.