The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1868-12-02
NASBY.

NA0o K
WriHen for he IbletIo BLAZE.
mr.. Nasty Suggests a Haven ohResf
FOR 1he Distressed Souls VINO arc I'm
Danger OF Losing their Places.
WASHINGTON, Nov. Is, 1868.
We he'd meetin in Washington last
mite, to consider things. There are
many things to consider jest now, and
1t wuz deemed proper to consider EN- .
1t wuz faint glimrins nv hope unto the
countennnces NV few nv those present,
but nothin NV certinty-nothin nv
| ashoorance. Secretary Randall re-
markt that SO far ez he wuz concerned
| he he'd made up his mind. He shood
not take offs under theincomin admin
| istration. BE mite yeeld in other mat
| tiers (for he wuz NV yeeldtn nacher
but on this he wuz inflexible. McCul-
| loch and browning were also determine
ed, but Seward had other ideas. be
chirped In that the Oldest man co0dent
tell wat sixty days wood bring forth.
swat shall we dor" askt Postmas-
ter from Ohio.
81 seiest for President Johnson" sed
Randall, THAT he apply for the Spanish
throne. BE wood be acceptable TO the
Spanish people, for he hez all bis life
been putin the Bourbon down."
Randall hez no longer any fear NV
the fEeSlueut.
idea, witch II acted onto will pull US
out NV our sea nv troubles"
ESpeek !" exclaimed they all with
one breath, "speek !"
"My idea is Cuba. Cuba, the gem NV
the Antilles-the britest Jewel in the
crown Nv Spain. Let Secretary Sew
ard. who hez talent for reel estate, buy
It now before the new Government hez
Its internal revenoo system establisht,
and while 1t is hard up for money. Let
Cuba be the politikle Botany Bay Nv
this country. Let it be bought by Sew
ard and then let the President go 10
work to wuDst fllin ofiisis for its gov
eminent, while he still heZ the power
nv appintment. He must not wait to
hev 'em hold eleckshins, for We alluz
succeed better in gettin oftisis by APP
pintment than by eleckshuns. Wat
Heaven see open before usl hev
been readin Cuba up, and Istind that
that Island pays the Home Govern
ment S25.000,0O0 per annum. II the
Spanish Government kin git SOS, 0000..
600 out nv EN-, we kin double it with
our experience. There's enuG for all
nv us. Give Randall u place cores
pondin with that he now holds; make
Ben Wood superintendent NV the
Havana Lotteries; make Frank p.
suthin else, what 1t don't matter, ez
he'll take anything; make good places
for Ross. Fullerton, Binkley, Mrs.
Cobb, Ynllandigham, Brite. Mrs. Per-
nv, John Quincy Adams, Jr., Frank
Peerce, GinTal Forrest, Jim Steedman,
lSosso, Doolittle, Cowan, Dixon, Sex
rotary Welles, and all nv that unnum-
bsred throDg NV hungry soles, who
hev lived on pap so long thatany other
diet sours on their stumicks. And
then"
"But sposin Congress, when it meets
refooses to ratiiy the pnrchis by maxim
an appropriashen2" askt doubter.
Rsfooze to make the appropriashun!
RefOozei Hal Put before GIneraI
Grant the prospeck NV never agin see-
in the Blair family-put afore Congress
and the Amerikin people the hope NV
never seein the men / hev menshdn'd,
and wat wood twenty or thirty mill
lions, mora or less, be to em2 Nothin
Congress wood vote 1t simultaneously
and the people would all say 'Amen !"
Lord, how quick the bill wood go
through, and how quick Grant wood
sign it.
:, But spos'n Congress shood refoose,
wat then2 Jest ez we'll. The Blairs
wood hev their posishuns. and the Gu
ban officials, OF they are versed In
American politikle history, know, eff
they know any thing, that when the
BlaiIs get:into place, nothing but
death loosens en-. We should hist the
banner NV ndependence-..we shood
paint onto that banner the inscripshen:
"Othces for All, in n Country where
Likker is not taxed !" and In u weeks
time an army NV Dimokrats, big
enough to capcher Spain herself wood
stand afOre EN-? Whisper "Post offis''
In their ears, and they'd wade knee
deep in blood. Lord, how the Spanish
soljerY wood go down Rfore emf How
Frank Blair wood go for Lersundi
How allsthe trained cohorts of Dino,
crisy WITCH heV bin abstainin from offs
! SO many years, wood risk their all for
a taste NV the sweets NV poslshen!
| sob! tho deliciousnis of the pros
peck! Think Nv an island with enuff
niggers onto 1t to do our labor, and
enuh white CUbans who can't read to
vote for us! Why, 1t wood recall re-
collections Nv them happy days before
the war, when the DimOcrisy wuz thus
CONSTRUCTED. hunger and thirst for
sich."
"Roll swiftly round ye wheels oftIme
And bring the happy day."
"Then Gineral Grant Good hev peecel
Then he wood only hev the Ablish-
nists on his handsl Then the niggers
nv the United States mite hev suffrage,
for 1t would make no difference to us.
We wood heve ofisis TO live onto, and
pure niggers to look down upon, and
wat more Good we want2 The only
difference wood be, we wood hev to ac-
custom our stumicks 10 Santa Cruz
rum in place NV whlskey, but that we
Good do. The effect upon the bowels
is the same-it differs only in taste,
and am told that when both are new
there amt much difference in that"
The suggestion wuz favorably received
and 1 hev no doubt it will be acted
upon. Eft is-bHt why this .'If." 1t
must be done-it shell be.
PETROLEUM v. Nasty, p. NJ.