West-Jersey pioneer., 1868-01-03

- A4'O. - phOoIU IhO hio03
coming from the east, over an ocean Of
water, depress the human body, while
that which comes from the west, across a
continent, culivens the spirits, and gives
courage and vigor? Be this as it may,
it seems as if some people never felt any
wind that was not east. They are
always s'out of sorts" The weather is
always just what they don't want. met
one of these men awhile ago, farmer,
who raised all manner of crops 1t was a
wet day, and | said
"Mr. Nayling, this raia will be fine for
your grass crop" '
eyes, perhaps; but it is bad for the
corn, and will keep it back l don't be-
lieye We shall have crop"
7 A few days after this, when the sun
was shining hot, said
"Fine sun for your corn, sir"
ayes, pretty fair, but it's awful for the
rye. Rye wants cold weather."
Again, on cold morning, met my
| neighbor, and said
This must be capital for your rye,
Mr.. Nayling."
"Yes, but it is the very worst weather
for the corn and grass. They want heat
to bring them forward"
So the man lives in a perpetual east
wind. Nothing suits him, and it would
be impossible for Providence to give him
weather about which he would not grum-
| BILE. | know one man who feels that our
country is on the very brink of ruin, the
Government curse, and everything to
be destroyed. And he has felt and talk
ed thus for at least thirty years, and yet
his property has been increasing in val
ue all this time, amid this gathering ruin
The fact is, the man lives in an unchang-
ing east wind. And there is Mr.. Slow
who lives in the hollow under the Long
Hill he has been mourning for many
years over the degeneracy of the times
and always telling what wonderful law
yers, and doctors, and ministers there
were when he was young He can sleer
under any preaching he now hears, and
the lawyers seem to be young upstarts
or too old to practice. He longs for the
good old times. All MI. Slow, does
your weather vane ever point anywhere
but to the east ?-Rev. John Todd, D. d
A JUSTICE EXERCISING UNLIMITED
AUTHORITY. = Within few days past
an affair occurred in the Sixth Ward
which for bold assumption of sweeping
judicial authority, we have never known
equalled s
| 1T appears that man and wife, tired
of each others society. agreed to have
the bonds by which they were held dis
solved, and together proceeded to the
office Of Justice in Springfield avenue
and made known to him their desire tt
be divorced. Without any hesitation
the Justice, who seems to have believed
his power to be unlimited, dtUorccd them
in due manner and form. Before noon
the next day, the divorced husband again
appeared before the same Justice, accom-
panied by blushing fair one, to whom
he desired to be united The Justice
did that thing also. and the two went
smiling from the office, apparently happy
in each Others love- But the divorced
woman was not to be outdoue, for ere the
Justice had closed his docket for the day,
she too, again entered the presence of this
man of wonderful power, and this time
hanging upon the arm of an athletic fel-
low, of whom she proposed to make a
husband. In no wise non -plussed, his
serene highness proceed to tie them unto
each other, in the most approved and sat
isfactory manner, and away they went,
looking for all the world like pair of
turtle doves Is. there a despot living
who possess greater power than our Sixth
Ward Justice? = -Neaoark Courier.
a. DR.. F. sometimes drunk a
good deal at dinner. He was summoned
one evening to see lady patient when
he was more than "half seas over" and
conscious that he was so. On feeling her
pulse, aud finding himself unable to
count its beats, he muttered ssDrunk,
BY Jove!' s odf
Next morning, recoliecting the circum-
stance, he was greatly vexed, aud Just as
ne was thinking what explanation he
should offer to the~lady, a letter was put
into his hands .aossShe too we'll knew, !"
said the letter, "that he had discovered
the unfortunate condition in which she
was. when be last visited her and she
entreated him to keep the matter secret,
in consideration of the enclosed" pa hun
dred dollar bill. Jar