The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1868-11-28

be a disposition to let himself be taken in. We
cannot help thinking that the advertiser is too
modest. He calls himself Acer Sharp He
should have taken the comparative, Acrior.
"IP AuenT OF OATEN SroP."- The London
ReUiew the other day expressed belief that
on an average there are halfa-dozen poets in
every Scottish parish. II this be true, one has
no cause to wonder that Scotland 10 entirely
given up to (ost) meal an colly.
(WHIT) MORE WITTY THAN WsE.-Mr. Whit
more, the conservative candidate for Bridg-
north, has sent his photograph TO every cleo
tor in the borough. Such course Is an
infringement of the act which forbids a candi-
date to supply carriages-and therefore cartes
to bring voters to the poll.
DOMESTIC MAMMA lady OF our acquaint-
ance who has had long experience as a
housekeeper, and knows something of the
insolence Of servants, declares she always
finds, contradictory though 1t may seem,
those servants that don't "answer" suit her
best.
"WHEN THE WINE IS IN THE MAN, THEN THE
WITS ARR IN THE CAN."-After the second
bottle old Beeswing's head gets completely
muddled. Seeing bevy Of fair girls drying
their flowing locks on the beach, he sputtered
Out-"B-bless me quite a Back hair -nalian
festival !"
A RECOLLECTION.
twas at the Crystal Palace l wandered with
my Jones, .....
We looked at the geranlums with variegated
zones,
We wandered in the Rosery and o'er the
verdant meads,
And whirled along the terraces on wild veloci
pedes.
We sat in the Pompeian Court, and that of
Furniture,
We visited the pictures too, and Camera OBJ
scure.
1t was a day of wild delight,
And when we got an appetite,
We sat beneath the screen of kings,
And ate and drank a lot OF things.
From bottled beer of Burton's Bass we drew
the flying cork,
We ate the pie of PmlicO, that's made of
plenteOus pork.
With bread and cheese and celery we fni she'd
up the FEAST
And Jones declared Of cognac We must have a
nip at least
And SO we had of steaming grog two tumblers
stiff and big,
By way of a oorreetive-just to qualify the pig.
saw his eye was getting bright,
But he assured me twas all right,
And thought, perhaps, upon the whole
We'd better have another stroll.
To the Tropical Department then we wan
dered and Jones,
And there we see the working bees and dila-
tory drones.
And then We scratched the parrots polls and
stroked the cockatoos,
And saw the hairless horse which seemed to
have fit of blues;
But, ali, the rarest object that was seen by
Jones and me-
The rarest and most touching far, it was the
Chimpsnzee.
saw the humid tears arise
AT once to Jones' eager eyes;
Into quiet nook he crept
And there he sat him down and wept.
"What is it that affects thee ?" said I, "my
gentle Jones,
Is it the lovely scenery-the organ's melting
tones ?''
But Jones he gravely shook his head, and
weeping still said he,
"Dear friend, excuse this weakness-it's the
Chi Chi Chimpanzee ~
Here sobbing choked his utterance. "But
come" | answered, "Jones,
Explain this sudden mystery, and don't make
any bones -
Said he, "Forgive memorial tears
The sight recalls my boyhood's years.
For, oh, my friend, yon chimpanzee
1t is as like as like can be
To her-the only one, in truth,
Whom once | loved in early youth
The spple-woman who'd stall
Erected 'gainst the playground wall.'