New Orleans Republican. [volume] (New Orleans, La) 1867-1878, 1868-07-12
Nasty.
Mr.. Nasty has q MOat Curious Dream
The Relative Position of the two Par.
ties, and the way GeRtlemen get from
one to the other

| L
meeN1l in Garrettstown in the afternoon
and one at the Corners in the evenin re-
| tired to my virchus couch full of my sub
jiek, and whisky. Its ruther tryin for
man at my time uv-life to do these things,
| To say nothin Nv liften up my voice like
one cryin in the wilderness for an old-line
Abolishinist, the terrible uncertainty as to
whether l ought to boiler Excl Rites
Suffrage for ALT or "Ameriky for white
men, troubles me. Likewise does the
doubt ez to whether l ought to make
speeches in favor Nv payin the debt in
Greenbax, a la Pendleton, or Gold, a la
Seymour, or a repudiatin the debt alto
gether like PomerOY, is a incubus witch
weighs onto me, and p&ralyze5 my best
| efforts. For instants, at bob meetius l
wuz compelled to talk Nv tar ifs and SIGH,
Nv witch our people know jest about ez
much ez the gentle hog does oy Hebrew.
Wood oh woed the nominashens wuz
made and the platform adopted, that 1
might go instructor our people from a
proper standpoint. Tired out and disgust
ed, retired early and slepta troubled
sleep. y SIGH mite l dreemed most
horrible dreems. the fOllerin beiu a feeble
statement of the lightest Nv EN-:
In my dreem l was in a country the like
Nv witch never seed afore. There wuz a
low, level place, a sort Nv pit indeed, and
not pit either, 50 much ez il wuZ a swamp
or bog, with only here and there dry
spot. 1t wuz not ez cheerful a lookin
place ez 700 coed think Nv. 1t wuz full NV
skulls and dead mems bones. The high
ways leadin into it were slushy and nasty
and an odor ez Nv seven hundred thousand
million dead cats constantly assembled to
veX the pure air above. 1t wuz inhabited
it wuz. ROllin about in the corrupshun,
saw the face Nv every Demokrat l had ever
seen, and they wuz all about their yOosual
avocashens, too. Ben Wood wuz a sellin
lottery tickets. Fernandy he'd his hand into
city treasury. A. Johnson wuz signin
a pardon for counterfeiter (another c0un-
terteiter, who wantid the skill Nv the in
karserated one, wuz waitln to carry it 10
him. A immense cOncourse Nv John Nor
ri ssey's constituents were organizin raid
onto niger orfan asylums, and another i'm
mense mass wuz q burnishin weapons ez il
for another confick with suthn Il, Rite back
Nv this place wuz a precipice risin up al,
most perpendicular many feet, on the top
Nv witch stretched away most beautiful
prospeck. l asked one who was crawlin
out of the place what it all meant and he
replied that it wuz the restin place w the
Democrisy.
"Look! sed he, "about voc. Seest voc
that elevated, breezy plain? That's the
chosen home Nv Republikenism up there
and I'm goin for it.o
"But stay" sed 1, Il fain wood know
more. Who's that" / askt, ez a body cum
shooting down the abyss, boundin plum
T into a most triteful mass w corrupsheI
: below.
: That's Ross, Nv Kansas sed he. "Lool
: out. here comes Henderson. too and FoW
: Ter. Ha! haI' LATED this escapin one. e,
he saw Ross and Henderson scramble on
t Nv the dirt, with it stiekin to EN-, and try t,
crawl up the side Nv the precipice. Fowle
I seemed to like it, and settled down a
t though he intended to stay. There wer
l others who got so close to the verge NV tn
e precipice that l RELY trembled for EN-, bu
they he'd strong hands a holdin Nv en-
8 back.
"Yoo motifs that there is one way Nv com
5 municashen between the two places SCI
e he, (Which is legitimit. 700 observe tina
l ladder?'
5 II hedn't, but I do now. NJ eyes
, dim" sed l, swat is them inscripshens q
J. the rounds?'
+ "They are inscribed ez follows:
: No. 1.-THE higbest), Conservatism.
' No, 2" Constitooshuel Doubts
r No, 3" Southern Rites"
: No. a" GreenbaX."
q No. O." Repoodiashen.'
No. c." AmerIky for white men,
i No, -" Atrikin Slavery
"Yoo will observe the last one is part
). under the siush which kivers the botluu
: NV the plain. It's tride lower than tn
E original level. But look theirs suthin
goin on up there See"
, Trooly, Their wuz suthin goin on, Chez
l Justice Chase appeared at the head Nv tn
:. stairs on the very brink Nv the precipice
u Follerin hin and eGtreatiu Nv him to stay
wuz Theodore Tilton, Horace Greeley, an
d NOR n a million NV others, white and blacE
4 who wuz a holding up their hands in hol
g ror at the way his face wuz turned TIL
d Cheef Justice wuZ a assurin Nv EN- it WI
J, all rite, that he shood probably 90 dow
: to the first round, which wuz " Conservl
4 tism," as he considered it safer GROUND
Theodore grabbed him by the sholder, t
a restrane him, but Salmon showed him o
: roodly, and put his foot on the first rount
L looked closer, and saw it all at a glance
August Belmont had climbed up SO ez to b
l. in site of any one staRdin on that round
II and wuz waVin flag at him onto witch wn
inscribed "nominashun.' S. P, he'd hi
D venerable eyes fixed onto that, and didn
u see nothin else, kind Nv parshel blindnes
T. which has rOoined quite many public mel
e Don't 60 to emu cried Theodore an
l. Harris. II won't" returned tho Cheerful
It old innocent. "Tll bring EN- up to me.
Infooriated with the site NV that flag vic
l Belmont kept artfully movin atoTe him,
quickly dr0pt onto the second step, and tn
q next, each step bein longer than the on
d preoedin it. By this time the attenshen u
n 4 the Democrisy below wuz attracted toWar
Z the spectacle, and they cheered Justify, nc
: so much at the prospeck Nv gettin the eui
: nent Judge, ez at the sorrer and chagri
Z depicted onto the faces NV Greeley, Tilton
g ct al, at the top.
II Down he went, amid the plaudets Nv tn
Democrisy, who by this time were all bur
rahin for him, step by step, till he come t
Ie the last one. "Comel ~ said BOregard
y Forrest, Fernandy Wood, and Yallandy
!, gum, "come One step more-Ons littl
~ tiny,step, and its over. Come, love, come!
,e "Non' sed he, tremblin like a man wit
it the ager, 81 can't go that step. l CAM
N indeed l can't, Come up to me-yo
re must
y "Well,v said Belmont, "its better for L
y to stand on that last step. Get hol,
ii Marble, and the strongest Nv yoO and Ii
"a the concern out Nv the mire and up to Ii
Of Cheef Justis Take bold close. Now, a
IN together! with will"
! a They tugged and tugged, but to no pul