The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1868-07-01

OPiCE--NoL every one WHO mas -DucQ
of the article, money, nowadays con
,sequently they are not troubled greatly,
with. the perplexing thought as to where
it goes. Some there are however, who !,
have it., and who, unable to keep il, +,
wonder how it me!ts,away. so last; for
their benefit, we give the following; as
showing in which way the, money goes: ,
How goes the money? Well, .-%..- j..
I'm sure it isn't hard to tell, = ..-s,o--=s -
II goes for rent and water rates,
For. bread and butter, coal and CRATES, - -. -
Hats, caps and carpets, hoops and hose
And that's the way the money geest =
How goes the money? Nay, :
Don't every body know the way ?~-rsy 4 - -
1t goes for bonnets, coats aud capes,
Silkss satins, musains. velvets, grapes.
ShawlS, ribbons, furs and furbeiows-- I 4 :
And that's the way the money goes?
How goes rhe money? Sure, -
I wish the many ways were Fewer; =
Il goes for wages, taxes, debts, = !: : -,
II goes for presents. goes for bets,
For paints. p3mate and suede rose =, =.
And that's the way they money goesl
How goes lhe money? Nov =
I've scarce brgun to mention how; -. -.
f goes for !aces. feathers. rings, !.
Toys. dolls. and other baby things;
Whips, whistles, candies, bells and bowSe ..
And that's the way the money goes! =, =.
How goes the money? Come, -
know it didn't go for rum; '-'.F:
II goes for schools and Sabbath chimcsy -,
I It goes for charity sometimes, -. ;.
For missions and such things as those - ~
And that's the way the money goes 4: s.,s - ::
How goes the money? There, =, = ( 3s+,,., : -.
Pm our of patience, declare;
Fl goes for plays and diamond pins, - <
+ For public sins and private sins, d.. r.
For hollow shans and silly shows = - = - =,
And that's the. way the money goes! 80.
A preventive against marriage is
given by new contributors ~"Jox" who
says: =. ~ - :,
|, Fiat if man feels much like getting
married, yet inagines he ought not TO, =
the best remedy be knows of is to- help :
one Of his neighbors to move a house
full Of furEiture-borrow about nine of =
his children and hear them cry. If that !,
fails, :build,up a. FIRE Of damp wood, and j.
when the smoke in the room IS the
thickest. hire woman to scold him
about four hours. If-he can stand all
these, ~he had better get married THE
next day-give his wife the pants and
be the silent partner in the great firm :.
| of uratsimony. The remedy is severe,
but as every man is liable to these things
after he -yolaes HIMSELF it will do no
harm. .., -. &
"Why does the operation Of banging
kill man." inquired DR.. Whsley.~ A
Psychologist replied, Because inspiration
is checked, circulation is. stopped, a6d
blood suffuses and congests the Sbrain." :
.Bosh," "<reptied his grace. .it3js be-
cause the rope is not long enough to LET
his feet touch the ground" 3 ~ >,
| . A commercial man who travels FREE.
quently between Boston and New York.
relates an amusing anccdote Of a. fellow. :
passenger who fell asleep soon after the. ,
train left the depot, and OF it's arrival at ,
a certain station the conductor called
out, "Jamaica PIain,' when the sleepy
IellOW sang OUT, 1Not oy a- StSus Is -
Brandy cock tail for ne" -: J..
The strangely arranged ribbons on
the new bonnets of the Queens of the :
Parisian demilnoude,- which, in the :
courseof few months. viii be worn
by all the fashionable ladies on earth,
are called, "Dont, fall in love with ma: ;
young man." Sound advice. - - - es
| A young lady gives following catar
logue of different kinds of loves < -
THE sweetest, mothers love the
longest, a brothers love; the strongest,
woman's love; the dearest, q mans
love and the sweetest, longest, strong.
est, dearest love, "a love Of bonnet. '' :
/ Krarsalatt's wife discovered her old
hen sitting in the back yard, and. bust
up her nest Soon after, the poor wife
came in much excited. and said: 'My
dear K-atsalatt, I took the eggs, from
Brownie and she has goae and sat
onto an old meat AK" Let her set"
said the bilious old fellow, ''if she sets
on an Ak maybe she'1 hatchet 7"
.o,.ooro,5onS of {ho