The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1868-11-18
FACETlE.

~
A natural color-the grey of evening.
The round of domestic life-a hoop
skirt.
Motto for ladies in evening dresses:
"Bare and fOrbare." -I0GdhaWk.
Why do so many people in China
travel on foot Because there is only
one Cochin China.
The object some wives have In blew
ing ND their husbands is doubtless to
have them come down.
Mrs. Mary Small, of Maine, has one
hundred and nineteen great grandchil-
dren living. Multum in pdrrO.
A lady in Lyons, New York, adver-
tises that she can fit out ladies with the
panier to produce that "ravishing ac-
complishment, the Grecian Bend"
A short man became attached to
tall woman, and somebody said he had
fallen in love with her. "Do you call
it falling in love Z" said the suitor, "lts
more like climbing up to it."
William Nestman, of Michigan, hung
himself last week as cure fer meian-
cholv. He is said to have been an hon.
est man aud is certainly now non
est man.
Two rival bellies met at hop. GLOW
well YOU look under candle light" ex-
claimed one, with stress on the can
dies. "Aud how charming you are IN
the dark answered the other. =
A lady went out with her little girl
and boy, purchased the latter rubber
balloon, which escaped him and went
up in the air. The girl, seeing tears in
his ewes said: "Never mind, Neddy,
when You die and go to heaven you'll
dit it,"
A certain little damsel, having been
aggravated beyond endurance by her
big brother, pumped down upon her
knees and cried: so Lord bless my
brother Tom. He lies, he steals, nc
swears; all boys do; us girls don't.
Amen"
A suite of rooms was advertised at
fashionable watering place as having
among its attractions "a splendid view
over a flue garden adorned with numer-
Gus sculptures" 1t was found OF ap
plying at the address that the garden
adorned with sculptures was the ceme-
terry.
In passing Faneuil Hall tho other
evening, we caught some boys throwing
stones at that venerable structure.
What are you doing, you yonHg ras-
calls ?" we demanded. Merely rocking
the Cradle" replied one of the youthful
reprobates-BOStO Transcript
MA, if l should die and go to llea-
ven, should wear my MORE antique
dress ?" "No. my love; we can scarcely
suppose we shall wear the attire of this
world in the next" "Then, ma, how
wsuld the angels know belonged to
the best society ~
An economical method of producing
the Greciam bend has been discovered.
On rising in the morning before break
fast take, on an empty stomach, one
pint Of green chesnuts, two large green
apples, halt pound OF raw cabbage,
and quarter of pound of honey. A
little milk and vinegar Will add to the
effect. The be9d in the most approved
firm, will appear in about half an
hour
Atthe Hardin county Kentucky Fair,
held last week a. grave question arose
regarding the proper status of widows.
The society offered prize for the best
unmarried lady rider, and also one for
the best married lady rider. A young
widow was excluded from the first ring
because tue girls all declared she was q
married woman. She then made an
plication to become u contestant for the
prize in the second ring, but was ruled
out because she was single woman.
Describing an :mpremPtu wedding,
the st. Paul Pioneer says: Judge Barn
ard, nothing 10th, united the loving
pair in Hymen's letters, and general
scramble occurred for the bridal kiss,
the CHIEF of police being the fortunate
individual who first succeeded in kiss
ing the maiden's cherry lips, and Colo
mel Flint the second. The bridegroom
took it all in good humOr, saying that
eff that was the custom it might do for
that time, but he'd be gol-darncd if be
didn't want to do the balance of the
work HIMSELF"