The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1868-09-18

Rrnz ooLrrS pusaaxD ONE NIX
SpGrs Ltsses.
APoli'n prOssssion-eivii engineering.
Can 6rs-ssisr Be- called lish, ea,srl
Extreme elamor-ths hollow OF the FOO,
Our arsisson the .spo,''-s detective.
Capillary attraction. tins bead Of hair
a pig that can't BE- driven. pig Of iron,
The bsns Of the unds,,andiug-,hs in.
step.
A difieuls thing 10 live ou-,he cus, oil
tho earth.
Over bead and ears In debt-wearing on
unpaid for hat.
When b man In tight placer When
no ID in bar room.
When b coffee real es,a,e3 When lis
ground.
Popular hose eompsny-Tbs society Of
women.
Why b . mouse like q load Of hay' Be-
cause the est'il eat il.
Can young women who use frea arms be
cslled shooting sal.leri's'
Democratic papers are using an old wool
cut Likeness Of John c. Ileenan. the prize
fighter, o. q portal, Of Frank BlaT.
A Western editor who advertised for
''clubs," hes received dozen hickory
bludgeons from bsckwoods subscribers.
Beauties often die old maids. They set
such value on themselves that they dom,
find a purchaser before tho market Is
closed.
Snuff takers differ from all the rest Of
the world for they turn up their noses ut
what they most admire.
An eminent artist lately painted snow
storm 30 naturally that he caught bad
cold BY sitting too near il with his coat of.
A young gentleman, speaking Of a young
beauiy's fashionable yellowish hair, called
it pure gold. "lt ought 10 b" quoth X,
lit looks like twenty-four carrots"
molly, pu, tho kettle on, well all have
tea" was played by the band at the Boston
Chinese banque, in homer Of the toast to
tho embassy.
In shoe store in the south part OF Bos'
ton may be seen large placard announc.
ing that "Miss Balmorals Boots" are for
sale therein,
A lady up town undertook. last evening,
10 mend her husbands shirt by the light Of
his countenancs. She Got about all the
buttons In the wrong place, and sswed up
both armholes.
The pronunciation Of i.iher and ni.,her
for either and neither-says Richard Grant
white-is q copy Of sccond.rats British
aflectaiion. Persons Of tho best education
in England say eether and nee,her.
Tho Democrats having tried every other
means in their power to ruin Gen. Grants
character, have fallen back on the report
that no took breakfast with Frank Blair tho
other day ai Leavenwonh.
"You labor over much on composition,
Doctor" said clergyman to an eminent
divine. II write sermon In three hours,
and make nothing Of t." 80 your congre
CATION say" quietly quoth the doctor.
One Of the delegates tn the Democratic
County Convention, which met at Nspole-
ON, Ohio, a few days since, said he had
voted the Democratic ticket ever since he
was seventeen years old. There are
good many Of that sort.
ia seaman should turn back every time
he encounters head wind he would never
make voyage. So he who permits him
self to be baffled by adverse circumstances
will never make Roadway in the voyage OF
life.
Judy represents volunteer At ride
meeting 40 remarking, ater having made
his shot,-awsll. I could have sworn ht
the bull that time. Officer In charge,
(huviag looked through tho glass; "No,
bu, very near. You've killed the cow In
the field to the len.
i, 10 reported that The Chinese on the
Russian border like the English missions
ries very much and extended cordial wei
come TO them. The main reason 10 that
the missionaries distribute Bibles bound i'
leather and the Chinese make shoes with
the bindings and save their soles ut English
expense.
The Democrats ought to settle among
themselves whether Gen. Grant ought to 10
punished or rewarded for what he did in
tho war. Mr.. Hendricks says he ought to
be rewarded, and Mr.. Pendlsion ssys he
ough, to 10 punished. But Brick Pomeroy
and the New York World say he ought to
be punished, and arc doing their best to
STIR UP hatred ssainss him.
A young gentleman, or an elderly ono,
we do no, remember which, ansr having
paid his attention to lady Tor sope time.
"popped tho question - the lady in a
frightened manner exclaimed, '.you scare
me, SIR" Tho gentleman, Of course, did
no, wish to Tighten the lady, and eonss'
qucutly remained quiet for some time,
when she exclsimed-"Scare mo again y
We did not learn how affair." turned out,
bu, should ssy ,hs, d IVES hin turn TO b
scared. .....--
Mover lean 90 others. lis poor way
to get strength, courage. Posiiion, or sdvsn'
tass in any way. l,in &c, makes It's sub
L. - n.