The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1868-10-10
From "Punch."


I'm the Ear of archbishop Trench.)
still remain Protestant I'm not ashamed
to say,
And "No Surrender" is my cry; or, if you
like, my bray.
While yet the Pope's Power abroad, the
Pope's foe at home;
And 1 shall cry ''No Popery' until the French
quit Rome.
doubt, though, Of the Irish Church, and if
Whether you'll yield bulwark to the enemy
or no,
Whether, indeed, he do not, while against
him you maintain
The Syllabus in spirit, the advantage rather
gain.
But 0 mine Irish Bishop, o my Parson, o my
Friend
Beware with what munitions you your citadel
defend.
Raise mounds, plant stakes, and with chevaur
de friSe your ramparts crown,
But don't you set up skittles to be instantly
bowled down.
o reverend rhetoricians, can you possibly
suppose
Because you call Church "Her," that your
Church has eyes and nose,
And is a living Person, as that word's by Mill
applied,
With right, as such, of property, that must
intact abide I
Your Church is an Abstraction, without either
crown or sole,
Can neither wear ChauSSore on foot, nor chignon
upon poll;
Your vested rights are all the rights whereof
she stands possessed:
Whilst your life property is spared, the State
can claim the rest.
Then take your loaves and fishes, and enjoy
your several shares,
No Corporation has right of leaving wealth
to heirs;
Save only what the nation grants, which if
you'd have it do,
Show your successors like to be more worth
their salt than you.
DONKEY RACE AT DoNCAsTER.-At Doncaster
Races, among the quadru peds that ran for the
Badminton Handicap one was named Ritualist.
The owner OF this beast was Mr.. Prior. Sup
posing that the Doncaster Races are horse
races, some people may wonder that Prior
should have given the name of Ritualist to a
noble animal. A regular Prior would, of
course, never have done any such thing, and
we are driven to the supposition that the Bad
mintop Handicap is race in which the winner
comes in hindmost.
HIGH AFFAIR OF HoNoR.-The French code
of honor obliges any gentleman insulted by
another to challenge him, and allows that
other the choice OF weapons. 1t should also
allow him the choice of place. Then a funam-
buist though less skilled than M. Blondin,
would be enabled to assassinate anybody he
pleased by extorting a challenge from him,
and then Obliging him to fight upon the tight
rope.
COSMOPOLITAN IDEA.-The Extradition
Committee have just published their Report.
They recommend that, on stipulated condi-
tions, the extradition of criminals should be
facilitated. 1t is well that we and foreigners
should agree to give up each others rOguss,
but how much better it would be if We could
also get our foreign friends to give up their
rogueries
BoxIANA AND RoGUEs.-The magistrates ex-
hibit laudable frmness in dealing with
prize-fghters. 1t is particularly to be hoped
that they will enforce the law with rigor
against all those dishonest small tradesmen
who employ Light Weights
FROM GLoUoEs TER UnmoUable Feast a
Stationfry FeStiUal.-The Festival of the Three
Quires. The performers, it is stated, went to
bed in Eighty-two sheets.
SPORTING .INTELLGENcE.-Formosa has won
the st. Leger, to the satisfaction of her ad-
mrers and hackers, who were right in saying
"Beautitul for ever -
A "STAGE W'IsPER."-The man who puts
the straw in the omnibus.
ADVICE TO IDLE VAGABoNDs.-Put your shoul-
der to the wheel-or put your feet.
Motto for confectiOners' flies - "What
Ices l sticks to ~
"A great patron of the turf-Old Scratch.
The GREAT EAsTERN.-NOt Lord Mayo.