Smyrna times., 1868-09-09
WHOLE NO. 7O8
The Woman and the Crow.

A correspondent of New York paper gives
the following amusing anecdote, which has
never yet appeared in print. " 1t was told
me" he says by one who was both an eye aud
ear Witness and who, of course, speaks from
the booS. The story will lose much of its lu-
dicrOusness in my style of writing it, but here
it goes.
At certain crossroads, in the State Of
Alabama, stood small grocery, or "whiskey
shop" previous to the rebellion, where bust
head, and lightning" were dealt out
to the thirsty, unwashed, at five cents drink,
or twenty cents quart. The presiding genius
of this delectabe institution was one Bill Siikes,
who among various other pets, had dOmesti-
Gated crow, black as the ace of spades. This
crow had learned, among other things, to re-
peat quite plainly the words damn you"
which he, OF course, heard frequently used in
the grocery. During the prevalence of knock
down-snd drag out fight one day, however, the
crow was frightened from home and few off in
! to the woods never to return.
About three miles from the grocery, was
settlement meeting house-an old tumble
down, dilapidated affair only used on certain
occasions, when a " circuit.rder' happened
that way. Into this building went the crow,
taking peaceable possession; and two days
thereafter the church was thrown open tor
preaching, and large crowd assembled among
whom was very old lady, who was compelled
to use crutches i'll walking, who took her seas
in the front pew" and was soon deeply ab
sorbed in the eloquence Of the preacher. The
reverend gentleman had scarcely got under full
headway, and commenced laundering his
anathemas at all grades of sinners, when q
hOarse, croaking voice from above uttered the
omnlOuS words:
" Damn y0u.
The preacher and congregation looked aghast
at u;h profanity, and each peer6d into his
neighbor's face in vain to detect some sign Of
guilt. Quiet was at length restored, however,
and the sermon proceeded, but ere ten minutes
had elapsed the ominous damn you" again
electrified the audience, and just as the preach
er cast his eyes upward to search for the deliD.
quent, the crow few down from bis perch, and
lighting on the bible, calmly surveyed the
terrified crowd, and gave another doefuI crosk !:
, " Damn yOu.
: The effect was electrical Giving one start
: led and terrified glance at the intruder, the
, preacher sprang from window Carrying sash,
! glass and all with him, and set of at break
neck pace through the woods closely followed
, by his horror stricken congregation, who bad
= piled out of the building pe.Inell after him.
, In the general scramble the old lady with the
: crutches had beea knocked down in the church,
where she lay, unable to rise, a.Id on observing
her, the crow (wh0 was after something to eat
few down beside, her. and cooked up bis eye
at her very knowingly, crooked
Damn y0u!"
a The old lady eyed him savagely for few
moments, and then burst forth in a tone Of
] t rtckess def nee:
Yes and damn you too I had nothing tc
do with getting up this Methodist meeting-and
Z You know it, too,
;. The poor old soul had mistaken the crow
9 for the Devil, and concluded to propitiate, il
: possible, the wrath of his Satanic majesty BY
denying all completely in that affair The world
/ is full Of just such people,