The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1868-11-18
A Wedding Night Shirt.

y
the night he was married, but th<
temptation was irresistible. They
could not have helped it to save
their lives. IL tell you how il
was.
Joe was abolt the most fancy
dressed buck n town-over-nice
and particula-a perfect Miss
Nancy in mamers,-alw put
ting on airs, ard more dainty and
modest than a girl. Well, when
his wedding day came he was
! dressed, trunk empty, and his
pants, especially, fitted him as
candle-moulds, and his legs can.
dies run into them. Tight was
no name for them. Their set was
immense, and he was proudel
than a half a dozen pea-cocks.
"Aren't they nice, boys?' he
asked of the two boys who were
to be groomsmen, and see that he
threw himself away after the
most approved manner.
"Stunningp' "Gorgeous!' !' re.
piled Tom Bennett. "Never saw
anything equal to them. But, ]
say, Joe, aren't they the least bit
too tight ? It strikes me that you
will have some difficulty in bend,
ing won't you?" -.
"Pshaw, no; they are as easy
as an old gloye. see!" -~ ..
To prove the matter. he bent
down so as to touch. his patent
feathers, when crack crack fol,
lowed like twin reports of a revol,
yer.
"Thunder exclaimed Joe as he
put his hand behind and found a
rent. in the cashmere from stern
to stern. "Thunder, the pants
have burst and what shall | dor
II should, rather think they
had" answered Tom gettIng Pur:
pie in the face, as he endeavored
to control his laughter "but there
is no time to get another pair. 1t
only wants half an hour to the
standing up time, and we have
got a mile to go-carriage wait
ing, too" -" -. /
"What shall I do, oh what shall
I do? =. .s.----- .
Il tell you what, if mine would
fit you, you shall have them and
welcome, but they are about a
mile too big; they would set like
a shirt on a bean pole. I see no
way but to have them mended.''
-"Who can get to do it, Tom ?''
"Well I am something Of a tai
lor, and can fix them so they
won't show. Hold on minute,
and I'll get a needle and thread -
"Can you? May heaven bless
your,
"Of with your coat" comman-
ded Tom, as be came back.
CHOW lay yourself over on the
bed, and I'll fix you in short Or
der" -
The command was obeyed; the
pants mended; the coat tails care
fully pinned over, so as to conceal
the "distress for rent" and all
went merry as the marriage bell,
until Joe followed the bride to the
nuptial couch.
There was only a dim light in
the room, but it enabled Joe, as he
glanced bashfully around, to see
the sweetest face. in the. world,
the rosy cheeks and bright lips ;
the lovely and loving blue eyes,
and the golden curls just peeping
fromsout the snowy sheets, and
he extinguished it altogether and
FASTENED to disrobe himself. Off
came coat, vest, fancy hectic and
collar, boots and socks in a hurry,
but somehow the pants stuck.
The moro he tried the more they
wouldn't come, and he tugged
vainly for half an hour.
"Thunder!" muttered Joe.
"What's the matter dear p came
in the softest accents from the
bed where somebody was wonder
ing if he was ever coming; and
forgetting his accustomed bashful-
ness, he blurted out:
). "Moll, that cursed Tom Bennett
has sewed my pants, drawers,
shirt and under-shirt all togcth-