The morning star and Catholic messenger. [volume] (New Orleans [La.]) 1868-1881, 1868-04-26
WIT AND w1sDon.

A grave ENTHUSIASTICALLY burying
man alive.
Scarlet, silk, and velvet have put out the
kitchen fire.
Men are often beaten with rods of their
own making.
!, When is iron the most ironical? When
it's u railing. -
when is window like star ? When it
is Il sky-light.
fet puppies are coming in with the for
eign fashions.
One finds the mistit of boot when he
puts his foot in it.
temptation is the fire that brings up the
scum of the heart. ~
The credit that is got by q lii onlp lasts
till the truth comes out.
Striking for liberty is interpreted. rs
knocking down policemen. % a f11t'F
1t is better to have credit for character
than character for credit.
An exchange thinks the most disagreeable
age for a woman is the rampage.
The best adhesive label YOU can nut on
your baggage is to stick to it yourself
The more man has of mischievous or
worthless knowledge, the more Informed
he is.
" Matchless misery" has been defined to
he to have cigar and nothing to light it
with.
Envy not the appearance of happiness in
any man, for thou knowest not his secret
griefs.
Ma, what is revenge 2" at is when
your daddy scoids me, and hit him with
broomstick.' -
What is the difference between hungry
man and glnttOn One longs to eat, and
the other eats too long.
Widows have been compared to green
wood, which, while it is burning on one
SIDE, 1t is weeping on the other.
Fevers are exaggerated colds. Taken
early they are as manageable as babes UNI
touched, they become too much for giants.
Some satirist once disrespectfillly OBJ
served OF Il young poet, that:
He sang himself hoarse to the stars very early.
And cracked weak voice to too lofty Il tune"
g Are these calico horses painted p asked
an inquisitive lady ut the circus. "Aye,r
replied the clown, 8: they are grained every
night and morning"
1t was the saying of n heather that he
who would do good, must either have
faithful friend to instruct him, or N watch
full enemy to correct him.
a practical joker in England saturated
the hair of n sleeping companion with napl--
tina, and set it Oh fire. The laugh came in
when he was sent to Jail.
"Will you have some grapes mOnsieur?,
asked n gentleman Of Frenchman. "No.
sare," he replied, ~ don't swallow my
wine in re shape of pills.
"Woman is delusion ~ exclaimed a
crusty old bachelor to witty young lady.
or other" was the quick reply.
At a colored party, Sambo asked Dinah if
ne should help her to some of the breast
" Now, amt you 'shamed Sambo to saw
breast before the ladies I'll take piece
of turkey BOSOM"
A sharp talking lady was reproved by her
husband, who requested her to keep her
tongue in her mouth. "My dear" responded
the wife, ait is against the law to carry
concealed weapons"
~ Mrs. Jones, farmers wife in Copnecti-
cut, says: 1 believe I've got the tenderest
hearted boys in the world. / can't tell one
OF them to fetch n pail of Water, but what
he'll burst out cryin'.
A policeman arrested a deaf and dumb
beggar who has made his intirmity q means
OF obtaining livelihood for many wears.
and was astonished to find that the man
could not only speak, but swear.
A beautiful lady was kissing and caress-
ing her beautiful lap dog "ah Mariar' ex-
claimed her fopish adorer, "why not grant
me the favors you are wasting on Fidele ~
aont KISS ere'y puppy" replied the
pouting fair.
Fun represents six year old in Knicker-
bockers seated in a barber's chair, and to
him the hairdresser: "Well, my little gem
tleman, and how would you like your hair
cut9" Charlie" like papa's, please
with a little round hole at the top"
DR.. -Dosey was i'll. His friend, the Rev.
Peter Quick, applied to the patron for the
next presentation but the doctor recovered,
and upbraided the Rev. Peter for such
for my death" "No, no, DOCTOR, SAID said
Peter; you quite mistake. 1t was your
living looked for.'
A good laugh is often as good as dose of
IN iein }ho 1o%a