Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1868-01-31
Woman.


| At the annual banquet of the WASH
ing Correspondents Club, held ON the
night of the III inst, the Star reports
the twelfth toast as follows:
woman; The Pride OF the Profess
ions, and the Jewel OF ours"-was re-
sponded to by Mr.. Clemens, better
known as mark Twain"
Mr.. Train remarked as follows:
Mr. President IL do ot know why
| should be singled out to receive the
greatest distinction of the evening-for
So the office Of replying TO the toast to
woman has been regarded i'm every age.
(Applause.) L do not know why
have received this distinction, unless
il he thnt am trifie less homely than
the other members of the club. But
be this rs IL may, Mr.. President, / am
proud of the position, and you could
not have chosen any one who would
have accepted IL more gladly, or labor
ed with n heartier good will to do the
subject justice, than /. Because, sir,
love the sex. (Laughter.) L love ati
the women, sir, irrespective of age or
color. (Laughter)
| Human intelligence cannot estimate
what we owe to woman, sir She sews
oil our buttons, llaughter) she mends
our clothes, Oaughler) she ropes as In
at the church fairs--she confides I'm us,
she tells US whatever she can find out
about the little private affairs of the
neighbors-she gives us good advice
and plenty of it--she gives us a piece
of her mind sometimes-and sometime
all of it-she sooths our arching brows
she hears our childrep--ours as a gen
elal thing. In all the relations of life,
sir, il Is but just aud II graceful tribute
-.
brick. tGreat laughter.)
Wheresoever you place a woman, sir,
in whatsoever position or estate--she
is an ornament To that place she nccu-
pies, and "a treasure To the world. Here
MIR. Twain paused, looked inguiIingly
at his hearers and remarked that the
applause should come In at this point.
IL came i'm. Mr.. Twain resumed his
eulogy.) Look at the noble names OF
history! Look at Cleopatra look ut
Desdemona.--looka at Florence Night.
ingale look ut Joan of Are look at
Lucretia Borgia! (Disapprobation ex-
pressed.l Well, said Mr. Twain scrat.
ching his head doubtfully, suppose we
let Lucrelia slide! Look nt Joyce
Heath look at Mother Eve! (Cries
Of Oh! OH You need not look nj
her unless you want to, but (said MIR.
Twain reliectively, after short pausc)
the fashions changed! repeat, sir,
look ut tire illustri0us names of hsto-
ry! Look ut Lucy Stone! Look at
Elizabeth Cady Stanton! Look at
George Francis Train. Great Laugh
teri And, sir. / say 1t with bowed
head and deepest veneration, look at
the Mother of Washington. She rails
ed boy that could not Tie. Applause.
l H.. xI<
Obj liz might have been different II
dents Club. daughter, gr0ans, Misses,
and cries of put him out. Mark look
ed round placidly upon his excited au.
dience and resumed.
/ repeat, sir, that in whatever posi-.
tion you place woman she is an 0rna.
ment TO society and treasure To the
world. AS a sweetheart she has few
equals and no superi0rs, tlaughter) AS
a cousin she is as convenient, as a
wealthy grandmother, with an incura-
ble distemper. she ~ precious-as wet
nurse she has no equal among men
l(Laughter.)
What sir, would the people of the
earth be without women They wo'd
be scarce, sir, almighty scarce! Then
let US cherish her-protect her--let us
give her our support, our encourage.
ment, our sympatliy--ourselves il we
get u chance. tLaughter.)
But, jesiiDg aside, Mr.. President,
woman Is lovable, gracious, kind oi
heart. beautiful. worthy of all respect,
Of all esteem, of all Difference. Not
any here will refuse to drink her health
right cordially IN this number of wine.
for each and every one of US has per-
s0nally known, and loved, and honor
ed, the very best one of them all--Iiis
own mother [Applause.l
"THAT's How. AFTER great snow
storm. a little fellow began to shovel a
path through large snow bank before
/ his grandmothers door. He had moth.
ing but small shovel to do his work
with.
How do you expect to get through
that drift ?" asked man passing 10y.
! by keeping at 1t, said the boy cheer
fully, that's how.n
| That is the secret of mastering al.
most every difficulty under the sun. Ii
| hard task is before you, stick to il.
DO not keep thinking how large or
hard IL Is, but 20 at it, and little by lit
| tie it will grow smaller and smaller un-
! ill il is done.
If hard lesson is to be learned, do
not lose a moment in fretting; do not
lose breath in saying II can't, or II
do not see howl but 20 ut IL, and keep
at ii, steady. This is the only way to
conquer 1t.
Horace f.reelev saws no has an ante