The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1868-12-17
HANAsRY.l
MIR. Nasty has a Dream which Does
Not Comfort his Righteous soul. but
which. ON GheaOtheF Hand. Gives
him Great UneaBiness.
Written for the Toledo Blade.
CoNFEDRIT II ROADS, /


the Northern newspaper NV the Dimi-
kratio persuasion witch comes to this
Office to Deekin Pogram, into wich wuz
article onto 1.-THE Fucher nv Democ-
risy." The able and dignified writer
took the posishen that the only hope
NV the Democrisy was in lettin the dead
past bury its dead-in sinkin all the
ishoos NV the past ten years-ln &C.
knowledgin the sitooashen, and &C
ceptin the results NV the war; in sink
in out NV site the old leaders and put
tin such men ez Chase, Seward, John
Quincy Adams, Jr., Evarts, Rosecrance,
etc., to the front, and thus hevin in
foosed new life and new blood into the
organizashen, 1t might go on conkerin
and to conker.
The article wuz a colum and half
in length, and its u weakness Nv mine
that 1 can't read more than colum
without gOin to sleep. Therefore at the
end OF the cOlum the paper dropt from
my hand, and dropt off into a gentle
slumber in my chair, and dreamed a
dream. 80 no
In my dream before me lay the body
Nv a man NV gigantic frame which was
Il breathin his last. He he'd bin pow
erfnI yOoth in his day, and hedn't the
appearance NV bein very old in years,
tho his hair wuz gray, his cheeks sunk
en- and his form frightfully emAciated.
His age was evidently the effect Nv dis
sipashen more than NV years-wikkid-
mis- he'd did its perfeck work on him,
and II wuZ plane he wuz goner.
Around him stood ull sorts NV people.
There wuZ Vallandigham, the BIairs,
Huffman, tho WOOdses, Voorhees,,
Hampton. Morrissey, Mrs. Cobb, Mrs.
Perry (between these two A. Johnson
and many more Nv that stripe, who ap-
peared to be endeaYorin TO resussitate
: Oaarlu laTunet fnHiViHnOa1
"Who is this ruther Dustid patriark2"
asked 1 Nv one who appeared to be a
chief mouTner.
GThat's Democrisy," answered he;
che has fought his lHrst battle, no gong
kin awake him TO glory again. He's "a
gone sucker"
AT this pint tho operators on the un-
fortunate sufferer gave up III despare.
~ kin do nothin," sed Seymour,
"that last exershun was his last. shall
HE me to my farm"
! 81 knowd it wuz uselis," sed Vallan-
digham, 81 shell leave Ohio and go too
Moo York, for any body kin git to Con
gress from that city,"
81 kin do no more" sed Voorhees,, 81
Erie stocl:s!"
"ISrie Stocks" remarkt Mrs. Perry,
with horror in her classic countenance,
thank the Lord, am not SO low ez
that"
at this pint a lot NV hungry looking
cusses, not SO prominent ez these others
demanded that the pashent be put into
new hands for treatment, and to wunst
they called out for Chase, Seward,
EVarts, RosecraDce and John Quincy
Adams, Jr., who heVin no other place
10 stay wuz ii hRngin on the outskirts
Nv the cTowd-proInptly they examined
the dyin CUES and proceeded to apply
the remedies.
This is one thing that's KILN him."
sed Chase, cauterin hidjus ulcer
marked slavery"
This must come of" sed Evarts,
whippin out a knife and takin oil foul
smellin tumor labelled Estates Rites"
"And I'll never consent to be seen
with him efthis is allowed to remain"
SEE Rosecrance, slashinG out a cancer
marked secession" r
And this must come of ef have
to do with him." sed John
Quincy Adams. Joonyer, ierkin of a
most fearful tumo marked 'Repoodera
shen." -..
And so they went on. one after
another, one pullin of this thing, and
another that; this one burnin out this
sore, and another that, til they he'd peel
ed 1t to the bones. When they he'd got
the diseased parts of Their wuz nothing
left but the skeleton. 1t wuZ a very
genteel skeleton, ez clean NV flesh ez
though 1t he'd bin dissected by AN en-
thoosiastic class NV medikle students.
They then commenced buildin NV 1t
up. Chase put on Ekal Rites muscle
EvArts stuffed NRshnel credit in the
hole Repoodiashen he'd made Rose
Grams sti1fened its back with loyalty
they iumigaled 1t, breathed into its
nOstrils, and wrappin 1t in the Star
Spaugled Banner, histed II to its feet.
u, oh L. Ito Int 10
breaIhed free, and wuZ altogether
more promisin. and presentable bein
than il he'd bin for years.
We were all reJoist and yet we wuZn't
so well pleased after all. He wuZ git
tin stronger, but his appearance WIZ a
Changin so that we didn't know him.
There wuz color cum TO his cheeks, he
he gave evidences NV life and strength
that wuz wonderful.
"Thank the, Lord" sed the Blairs,
''he's strong enough TO be ridden Hginl"
"Please Heavenl" sed VallandighRm,
"my troubles is DER. for there's strength
in DimOcrisy."
Lets mount" sed they in korus,
and forthwith Montgomery Blair crept
up onto his thighs, with the whole fam
lily oil his shoulders, each one nv witch
twisted his legs about him with death
grip. The new rejoOvenated giant stag.
gereSl under this, but didn't fall. May
or Monroe and his Louisiana crowd
SEES, and Huffman and Vallandigham
and Worries and Brite, and n thousand
more of the same style, and each load
ed with his record.
"FOr Gods sake" cried Chase, Sew
ard and Rosecranse, "for Gods sake git
of. He amt strong enuff to stand all
that. He can't carry the loads that
IL, Iii lit
ed him up-Any better now than he
could before. Git Otf-git OFF,
"Git OFF," sed IA planter who he'd got
a sekoOr holt. "UV what use Is Dino
crisy to me onless kin carry these ?"
pintin 10 the niggers under his arm.
"Git ofr?" sed the Blairs, "ef Dino
crisy can't carry us into posishen, wat
do we want NV III" and they griped il
so close ez almost to stranGle 1t,
git OFF," sed the Woodses, confess
we kin rideit Nv what use is Dimocrisy
to us ?"
And they all declined gittin off en-
phatically.
friends, in despair, livery we'll, we're
done; but look out"
Skarcely wuz the words out NV their
mouths when the poor giant gasped,
his knees knocked together, his pins
give out, and he toppled over with a
fearful crash, piIin the load in one
Heterogeneous mass.
AT this pint L awoke.
1 he'd no trouble to interpret the
dreem. It's troo that Dimocrisy can't
carry the load that hez bin put onto it
for yeers and yeers, and it's also troo
that the load don't care a tinker's cuss
about Dimocrisy onless il kin carry us.
To make it strong enutf to stand
alone, we hev to take of Nv it all Nv its
distinctive feechers and renlace am with