Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1868-03-09

Old Stuck I'm the NIire.
The father of General GRANT is writing
sketches of the early life and character of
the General for the Ne,o York Ledger, for a
consideration. The father commences with
the birth of the General. According to
these sketches, the birth, sucking and early
boyhood OF the General was most remark
able. The peculiarity of his birth, is that
he was born of woman; and, unlike those
two barbarians who founded Rome, he was
not suckled by she wolf, but by woman.
The narrative is defective, insomuch that
it leaves the public cropping in uncertain
~ as to his age when weaned, or the man
ner In which he was weaned. 1t appears
hat he early showed a fondness for horses
and was fond of the circus, (nothing is
said of the sabbath schooD, and had a
special ambition to ride horses and
villainous circus mules in the circus ring.
None OF these mules could throw him. On
one occasion he mounted one of these
mules, which vainly undertook to DO i.
A monkey, full of mischief and In obedi-
| ence to orders, came to the assistance of
the mule BY mounting up behind the boy
(now GeneraD GRANT, and round the ring
they went at furious rate, causing the
whole ampitheatre to ring with boisterous
applause. 1t was the best part of the per-
formance. Young GRANT dismounted at
his pleasure. So proficient was he in riding
horses, that he used 10 ride them some dis
tance to water bare-backed, he the while
standing erect, while the horses were under
full speed. AS to breaking colts, it was mar
velous how he succeeded. These things the
readers of the Ledger, and especially the
Republican part of them, read with mouths
agape.
| The last sketch, however, contains an ex.
ploit In the boyhood Of General GRANT thai
! throws his other exploits all into the shade
It was christian and heroic, and conclu.
sively showed that there was the sort o.
stuff in him to make Presidents out of. a
distant relation of his-a distinguished
man from Kentucky-was once on a visil
to his father. So one day the boy (noW
General) GRANT. who had a lot OF marbles
ranging somewhere from one to two doz.
en-, offered to bet the distinguished stran.
ger the whole lot of ma rbles, not even re.
serving one for a "nest egg,". that he
could jump twenty feet. Distinguished
stranger looked at him, and while an in
credulous smile played over his features
he accepted the bet. Near the house in
which the GRANT family lived, there was 9
tolerably steep declivity. To the top Of
that declevity young (now General) GRANT
went, and he jumped downwards
and In alighting he sank te
his waist in mire. The, old mar
GRANT, with an air of great satisfac.
tion, and to relieve the suspense of millions
of people who were worked up to higf
pitch of wonder to know which won the
bet, says .5ut he (the boy GRANT, 100,
the bet'' Satisfiedl' The matter is now
explained. We did not before know how
it was that the General lately jumped
into the Radical mire. For few marbles
in his boyh hood, he did not hesitate to jump
into the mire up to his waist. In expecta'
tion of securing the Presidency, b,
has jumped into the Radical mire
covering himself all over-a mire dirtiel
and more tenacious than the mir
he jumped into for the marbles wheI
q boy. He can't be extricated from it be
fore the Presidential election, when he will
discover that he dirtied his clothes fol
nothing, and he will, in all likelihood, b,
looked upon as old stuck in the mire.