The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1868-09-26

A MATTER OF TAsTE.--'"rhe Dashing White
Sergeant" fantasia for the piano-forte, is
described by its publishers as being an "ele-
CANT work'--to our thinking, there can b,
but little elegance about an officer who has an
expletive constantly on his lips.
The LoNG AND SHORT OF IT.-Admitting that
long sermons are, as a rule, injudicous, we
should be sorry to see the extreme in the
opposite direction carried out. How painful
must 1t be to hear OF clergyman constantly
having "a few words" with his flock
SHIPPING INTEMraENcE.-Insur at Lloyd's.
The MARYLEBJEE WBsTRY. - Mr.. Thomas
Chambers has issued an address to his consti-
tuents, in which he delicately insinuates
touch OF westry language to prove how thor
oughly he represents them. We quote lite
rally from the Times of the 25th ult.:-
"rhree years ago was most unexpectedly
inUlted by an Influential party among you to
become candidate for your suffrages"
Of course the Marrowbones will prove clea-
vers to candidate who thus vigorously vim
dicates the valued verbal virtues of the
westry
ORDER We have always thought that
the railways, among their other monopolies
had the exclusive right of manufacturing Grip
pies and invaids-for-liie. To judge from the
following advertisement from a provincial
paper this is not the ca5e:-
"PERAMBULAToRs! PERAMBULAroRs!! The
largest, BEST and cheapest STOCK OF Peram ou-
iasors i,t ever seen Is at -s manuf4etory, -
made to order"
THE WEATHER AT BADEN AND HoMBoURG,-
The heat at these fashionable spots has been
so very great that ia some instances people
have actually burnt their fingers at the gam
ing tables
En- sUITE.-At the coming Westminster
election should the friends Of the Female
Franchise demand a poll, we trust their
pole" will not be q baton dc dame, as that ia
fated to end in licking.
"cANs'T THOU NOT MINISTER TO A MIND ?''
Fond Parent.-'We don't find he gets on
with his learning"
Schoolmsster.-"Wall, fear he never will
do much. He has-h'm-in fact-he has no
capaoityW
Fond Parent" Vel, well, my good sir, we
amt psrtickler what We pay. Let him have
one at once!"
'PIcK-ME-UP," INDEED "A thirsty soul
hearing that some OF cur fast trains, in order
to economize time, pick up their water on the
road, suggests that an adaptation of this plan
might be carried ont 80 that passengers could
at certain points pick up glass of brandy and
water. The subject, we think, is worth con-
sideration.
GROWING THE EDWIGE.-The next time Won
hear an idiot shout 81 Il have your hat I" let
him have it, and one for his mob into the bar
gain, for here is a piece of good news.
patent has been granted to MI. J. Wheatley
for IAN improved construction OF chimney
pot" j. W. is evidently bent On supplying
long felt want and has our best wishes for his
success. Whatever shape his improvement
may take, it certainly cannot be more hideous
than our present Eead-gear.
A smLY-wET.-Old Magnum-iust for tho
fun of the tbing-had his likeness taken the
other day on board the Hampton Court boat.
80 cleverly did the artist-belevsd to be the
last of his race-catoh the expression, that
every one who has seen the portrait declares it
must have been produced by the Jolly Dog
process.
FoE SMALL TEA PARTlEs.-What is the diff
ference between the cup that cheers and the
flowing bowl Y-One is amusing, the other
be-musipg.