The Van Buren press., 1868-03-20
Fro'a Ciaeimati CoAnsre;ai.
Guy Fawkes in Washington.
% ydGHsu WASHINGTON, Feb. 2e.


abilities as that which startled the House
from its proprietics yesterday, when the
Honorable Schuyler interrupted the
placid stream ofCongressional pslaycr to
announce, on the authority OF Supcrin-
tendcnt Kennedy, of New York, that Guy
Fawkes had turned up in Washington, be
hind keg of nitre glycerihe, rs to the
capacity of which the comforting assur
ance is given that it is enough Ito blow
up the st. Nicholas Hotel" The Hon.
SCHUYLER thought this too serious mat
ter respecting which to let concealment
like a worm in the bud feed on his da-
mask cheek and well lie might, for il
near two linndred loyal Congressmen are
to be exploded at one "zzzip" Of gly
cerine keg, It is only fair that they should
have little timely warning, TO the end
that they may meet their fate as become
the civic defenders Of the Republic, and
expire, If expire thcy.must, in a blaze OF
glory as well as Of glycerine. f''h 'i1 " "
The scene which Mr.. Kenncdy's letter
suggests to the minds eye, if it does not
actuslly picture it, is not unmixcd with
the sublime, though ] confess it smacks
a little too heavily of the horrible for
contemplation in a pleasant frame Of
mind, especially for correspondent who
spends much Of his time in the fated cdi
fec, and against whom the chances Of ex
plosion are quite discouraging. But
doctors talk of "beautiful cancers" aud
splendid fistulas," and why may not a
special correspondent survey the explo,
sion of the capitol buildings from the
same strictly artistic stand point, and dis
cuss it from its scenic and notit horrilic
aspect. ''''' % ~. ''''.'''',. ',''' I
We are not informed as to the exact
time of day when this modern Guy
Faw!cs-who is, course, a Copperhead
.-(perhaps Vallandingham himself, for
he has the incentive of double revenge,
one personal and the other political, to
do the deed, J will execute his. explosive
design. 1t is not Unfair to presume,
however, that'likeshis prototype of King
James time, he will give his friends due
notice, that they may be duly absent, II
o'clock and two minutes p, m. would be
the best time, for just then the two
Houses will have been raped to order
and engaged inthe purgation Of their in ,
dividual souls. There are degrees Of
wickedness even in the execution Of a
gunpowder plot, and if both Houses
must be exploded, it is not too much to
ask that the deed be done at the moment
most favorable to the future Of the in
tended victims "tH-! "
AT about two minutes past - the Con
gressional eyeis closed in prayer and the
Congressional heart is Heaven .directeh.
Thus the benefit of clergy can be secured
without increasing the risk Of failure DIS
to the explosion. tits bad enough to do
the deed anyhow;oit would be double
distilled diabollsm o to do II when both
Houses arc considering a Reconstruction
bill,or otherwise engaged n 7a' '9''o,i
"Somc act
That has n o relish of salvatit h In 1T. 'Aa9 sl
Then trip them, that thcirhtcb may Kick at
Ieayen 90, ,..,,,,..tg .,....4 "a b., =, ..-,l,,i,,
And that their sonls may he as damned and
/ AS hell whcreto they go.rpi 30 '3i.d 'ai ia'
Besides, there is very decided adj
vantage not to be overlooked in the SC
Election Of the particular moment have
suggested. 1t is the only hour ofthe day
when there is certainty OF catching the
two chaplains, and fthere must be an ex-
plosion,1 hope l. shall not be deemed
cruel or unkind for mildly insisting that
the pastors of the two Houses shall ac
company their hocks ! Not to mention
the justice of the thing, It is necessary in
order to complete the dramatic interest
of the occurrence. Imagine the Rever-
end Doctor Boynton propelled through
the iron cupola OF the Capitol, humping
against the skirts of the Goddess Of Lib
helty as he ascends, and then, cleared OF
all such architectural distractions, sail.
! ing through space with the speed of a
cannon ball, his long locks streaming in
the blue ethereal, and his Mayfower coun.
tcnance disturbed little perhaps by the
lunexpectedness Of the rise but still placid
with the peace that passeth understand
thS hitcT nun COIncS COlIaN, ClOSc fOt-
lowing little dscopccrted but still smil
ing as he always is" The rising states
man OF the Republic" now, il never be
fore Having been forcwarned by Super,
llntendent Kennedy, he is doubtless fore
armed and grasps in one hand his lecture
Across the Continent" wherewith to
entrance.angelic ears, When the glycerine
shall deposit him where congregations
meier break up and Congress never meets.
Next Julian G. Washihgton--grumbling
as he goes up, but calmcd when assured
that Morton shares no better fate. Long,
the Representative Of the Burnt District
here below, he is on his way to a still
more burnt district down believer .
Then Ashley, with his curls-how
grand to see him as he propes upward,
with responsibility rs Representative"
all intact Hc'has been a little lathe re
Gently, and walks by the aid Of d stick (,
but the glycerine supcrsedes the ncccssi.
I ty for any other artificial assistance, and