Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1868-02-26
WHOLE NO. 1852.
Written for the Toledo Bladel
NASBY.
The PendIetOn Theory In Kentucky
---BaseOm's Trouble and how he got
out OF 1t.
POsT OFFICE, CONFEDRIT X ROADS, 1
(Wich is in the Stait Nv Ky.,)
February !, 1868.

February !, 1865.
A few days ago Bascum come into the
oils, where wuz bizzy attendin 70 the
oiznls Nv the YOonitid States Nv Aniriky,
a smokin cigar and drlnkin hot punch
out Nv tin dipper in wich 1 compound
the article, and remarkt that he though.
II wuz aoout time the Corners spoke.
onto wat pertikeler subjeck wood VOC
hey the Corners speek, my eherub" sedI.
"The Corners hez exercised her throat
onto almost everything up to date"
"Troo," sed G. W., " but there's one
subjeek onto Wieh the Corners hezn't sed
her say, namely, the erushin waite Nv tax
ashen, and the quNstlon Nv psyin the
bonds in greenbsx."
"That's probably becoz," remarkt 1,
" the Corners pay nary tax; and becoz,
also, not hevin any bonds nor any green
bax, she don't care, to speek after the man
ner Nv men, d-R about it. Isn't that
the case?'
Probably it is, but at the same time,
we ought to extend helpin hand to our
brethren North, who are maxim galyent
lite on this thing. Parson, we must held
meetln on this question, and resolve"
Wuhn to accommodate Baseom, Icalled
the meetin, and last mite it took place. It
WIZ an enthusiastic gathrin, ez the meet
ms At the Corners, wich report, alluz
are Skasely he'd the horn footed afore
the church Wuz filed. It wuz curiosity
wich brot EN-. None Nv EN- but Bascom,
Capt McPelters and myself, knowd wat a
bond Wuz, and they wantid to find out, l
wuz called upon to state the objeck nv the
gatherin. I opened with q movin
appeal to the people who wuz grOanin
under load Nv taxashen, for the benefit
Nv the lordly bondholdets Nv the country;
whose very life blood wuz being sucked
out Nv EN- by the bond -aristoerats Nv the
country.
At this pint Joe Bigler, who wuz Nv
course In the aujenee, eommenst weepin
perfoOsely, but disgustinly loud. He fair
ly bellered, and displayed altogether too
much emoshun.
"Mr. Bigles," sed I. "woodent little
less violent sorrer anser?"
ParsOn!" sed he, never hevin paid .
cussid cent Nv taxes in my life, never
knoEd afore, how much l wuz bein op-
pressed. But I'll eontane myself if kin.
I'll cork up my woes if they bust me-"
then wentOn to explane the PendletoR
/ lice. First the Government owes about
four hundred thousand millions Nv dollars,
more or less, wich is borrowed. The Alb
ohshn ice Is to gay this of ez fast ez it
falls due, in gold, and in the meantime to
pay interest onto the bonds ez per agree
ment on the face Nv em. But this is op-
pressive- This payin interest is watts
eatin us up. Therefore Pendleton propo-
ses to pay these bonds by ishooir four
hundred thousand million Nv greenbaxs.
When these greenbax wear out so that
they amt passa lie no more-so that Bas-
com won't take em for drinks, for instance
why, then we'll print more greenbax
and give EN- new ones don't see that
the debt is paid of any, but we git out Nv
the intrest. We ishoo q non-bearin in
trest note wich the greenbax is, for an
intrest bearin note wieh the present bond
is, and compel the bondholders to take EN-,
thus ruin Us, the taxpayers, by the weight
Nv taxashen We are now compelled TO carry.
This ice is not however original with
PendletOn. He's bin steein my thunder.
he'd subsisted many yeers in Moo Jersey
and elsewhere by the same expedient
Whenever I owed man gave him my
note and felt that q great load Wuz OF my
mind When it became doc, ef it made
the creditor eny easier in his mind, I took
it up by givin him another, and so on,
per yided he wuz Willin aud he'd faikh enuf
tn pay for the stamps. u WIZ an easy
and simple method uT gfttin on in the
world without onpleasantnis.
Capt. McPslter, late uV the Confedrit
army, wantid to know eff the greenbax
wuz good enuf for the soljer, eff it wuzn't
good enuff for the bondholderi p
Bsscom endorsed all that he'd bin sed,
and demanded resoIoosben, mOoVln ones,
wieh he presentid, and they wuz passed
At this pint, occurred suthin wich wuzn't
down in the bills. Skasely he'd the reso-
looshens passed, when Joe Bigler stepped
forward and remsrkt that he he'd votid Tor
them resolooshens becoz he believed in
EN-. But he wantid the lice carried forerd
to its logical conclooshen. He owed Bas-
com eighty odd dollars, wich wuz bearin
interest, and he'd bin for some time, and
wood, probably, for some time TO come.
Now, what is justis in governmental mat
ters, is ekally so in privit life. BE de-
manded Nv Bascom that note, and that he
accept in its stead one wich bore no inter-
est. He he'd borne this burden too long,
and it wuz high time that he be relieved.
Deekin Pogram felt that he must agree
with Mr.. Bigler. Bascom held his note
for long time, and he field that he coodn't
stand it no
"Why, blarst yer eyes" sez Baseom,
" lent 700 that that money to save yer
farm from bein sold out from under yer
feetiH
"Troo, but there's principle in it. 1
can't toll to pay intrsst to 700 more than
kin 70 the Government. Let Us be con-
81. ~ -haa
At this juneter every man in the bildin
rose tu his feet very excitedly, all Nv EN-
IN kOrious eommenst-
"Bascom holds q note Nv mine, Eieh
bears intrest and -
And Bascom, badgered ez he was, flung
himself out Nv the church in disgust The
aujence who he'd, however, got an ice,
Wuz not disposed tu give it UP. They fol-
Tered him without eny formal adjournment
TO his gr0sery, but he he'd anticipated that,
and had locked 1t. But all mite they hung
around the place yellin, (" Give me my
notel Give me my motel" and they he'd
faith that they finally wood bring him to
terms.
But along about Z o'clock the people be-
gun tn change their toon. It wuz time
for their mornin bitters, and they exclaim-
ed ez one man, "Bascoml why don't 700
open out! Let US in %
All Nv a sudden the door Wuz flung
open and there Ruz reYeeled tu the gaze
Nv the Corners the most impressive taboo
ever witnest. In the centre nv the room
stood Bascom, with burning pine knot
IN his hand, wildly Eavin it over his head;
afore him stood barl NV whisky, on eend
with the head out. We CROWD pale.
"Hal hal lafft he, with the most ms
lignant and feendish expression upon his
cOuntenance, sit wuz yoor turn last nites
this mornin its mine. Ther amt q drop
in the Corners cept wat is in this barl, and
not drop Nv .his shel 700 heV for love or
money. Hs ha who hsz the inside
track now! III burn it the mint the
first one crosses the Threshold"
"Mske rush, yelled Bigler, sit wont
burn, coz he's bin Wsterin it for weak"
aha! too trOol but heV you yik I'll
oYertarn the barl 20
I seed the pint to-Wunst. A cold chill
erept over me, and Deekin P0gram shook
like an aspen Leaf. None Good be pro-
koored this side Nv Louisville, three days
at least spOse the reeklis man shood carry
out his recklis threat.
The Deekin and threw ourselves into >
tie breach. We saw that Baseom wuz in
dead earnest. The crowd saw things ez
we did and softened down. 1t wuz finally
perposed ez a compermise that the rekords
uv the meeting shood be destroyed, and
that the lice Nv exchsngin notes with Bas-
com should be abandoned, and Baseom on
his mart To 90 on az yoosual- This settled,