Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1868-12-10
AmusinE.

The Philadelphia Ledger says: In a
corset-nlaker's shop, not far from the
Ledger building, there is sign giving
information that "all kinds of ladies
stay here. " Eat s.
An editor describing church in Min
nesota says: mo velvet cushions in our
pews; we don't 90 in for style. The
| t&tttest person has the softest seat, and
takes it out with him at the close of the
service. +"
| In reply to young writer who wish
es to know (which magazine viii give
me the highest position quickest the
Petersburg Express advises. "a powder
magazine, if you contribute a fiery
article" -,l.
The Desmoines Register saws the
grasshoppers recently ate up half an
acre Of tobacco for u man near that place.
and when the owner went out to look at
it they sat on the fence and squirted to-
bacco juice at him.. ase
"Ny son., !" said the elder SpriryIe to
his junior. thinking to enlighten the
boy ON the propagation of the hen spe-
cies, my son, do you know that chick
ems come out of eggs?n "Do they?'' said
Spriggles, jr., as he licked his plate. -
thought eggs came out of chickens y
Il wish could prevail on my neigh
bor Quinder to keep the Sabbath, F" said
good old Mister Jones. iii tell yGu
how to do it, y exclaimed young Smith;
get some one to lend it to him, and I'll
be bound he'll keep it. He was never
known to return anything he had b0r-
rowed. 5000. .lf.5...--...,
An Irishman was going along a road
when an ugly bull raShed down upop.
and with his horns tossed him over the
fence. The Irishman recovering from
his fall. upon looking up saw the bull
paving and tearing ap the ground, (as is
the custom of the animal when irrita-
ted,) whereupon Pat, smiling at him.
said: "If it was not for your bowling ana
scraping and your humble apologies, YOU
brute, faix l shonld think you had
thrown me over this fence on purpose
There is a magistrate in a town in fl-
diana named Helser A clergyman IN
the same place was called upon BY a
young couple not long since, who wish
ed him to.join them in the holy bonds of
matrimony. He asked the bridegroom
Ia soldier by the wayJ for his marriage
license. The man responded that he
had been engaged to the girl four years,
and thought that would do. Clergyman
thought not and renvrked as the speed
lest way to obtain license:
"You had setter take your girl and 70
to Helserl" a'
$50 to hell YOURSELF" retorted the an
CRY veteran. @s'" -.n' il-si.a
And seizing the bride by the arm, he
dragged her from the house, wondering
what manner of profane minister be
had met with. '-
We were told story few days since.
which we do not remember to have seen
in print, and which we think is fair
Deacon B., of Ohio, q very pious man.
was noted for his long prayers, especially
in the family. One Monday morning
the Deacon and his wife were alone.
and as was his usual custom after break
fast, a prayer was offered. There being
an unusual amount of work that day.
the Deaeon's prayer was short. He
seized his hat and milk pail and started
for the barn. His wife, being very deaf,
did not notice his absence, but supposed
him to be still engaged in PRAYER. On
bis return from milking, he was sur
prised to find- her still kneeling. He
stepped up to her and shouted .s Amen,i'
when she Immediately arose and went
about her work as though nothing bad
~