Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1868-05-06


Chng-too-fum, impressed with the impor-
tance and the responsibility of the duty de-
voved upon him. spent three days and three
nights without eating or sleeping, in order to
prepare himself for the work At the end Of
this time he sent out circulars to the people
generally, and to Che physicians particularly,
demanding to know who had been injured in
body or mind BY the fearful practices Of the
fooioos The physicians did not know any
thing about the matter but from the people
came up ten replies, wherein it was alleged
that many young Tartars had been injured
by over-cxertion. which exertion was necessa-
ry in order TO comply with the requirements
OF the pestilcn, fooioos The grand inquisi-
tor, Ching-too-tum was a man Of few words
Notwithstanding the length of his name, and
he Immediately summoned the juvenile B0os-
tooncse, with their fathers and mothers, into
his presence The first of the embryo mar
tyrs was fat and chunky little fellow, and
the commissioner called upon his father 20
state his case
Most magnificent Chng.too-fum, my son
rose from his couch the other night in his
sleep, and peramhuated my humble abode,
repeating in audible tones to the horror Of
hi1 hother anu hysfu-ihc muitphcauoh
table !" replied the sire of the chunky son.
The abominable multiplication table ~
added the mother. his helpmate.
What had the youth for his supper2' de-
manded the inquisitor.
Nothing age Ching-too-tam' but hemi-
spere Of miuce-pic, which the boy is very fond
Of, though his mother has often tried to ccn-
vince him that it isnot promotiye Of digestion,
and is suggestive Of nightmare
Begone Summon the next said Ching
too-ium with an appearance OF disgust upon
his noble features
The second martyr to the skookools and the
iootoos was delicate young lady Of fifteen.
Nature had bestowed so many charms upon
her face and form, and impaired so much of
winning grace TO her motions, that even the
sage Ching-too-tum smiled as she stepped in-
to his august presence.
Worshipful Chimg-too-ium,' said the fond
mother whose tongue was longer and smooth
er thanthat of her husband, " My daughter is
sorely yexcd and grievously tormented by the
demons of skookools and fooioos. Day by
day, she wakes thinner and thinner, and paler
and paler, and verify believe the skookools
and the fooioos will kill her And the moth
er wept IN bitterness Of spirit
Weep no more, woetu mother sighed
the sage, moved with pity by the woman's
tears " our daughter is fair to look upon,
and | doubt not hath many friends. Where
was your daughter last night?"
At home, studying her lessons till seven
o'clock
And them"
/ She went to.a party, and came home at
twelve
/ "What did she eat there2'
] Lobster salad scallopcd oysters, ice cream,
Roman punch, blanc-mange, Madeira Jelly,
cake and confects.'
"Where was she the night before last ?"
At the theatre
"And the night before? ?"
"At a concert"
And the night before ?"
At Gilmore's monster ball but she went
home at two o'clock in the morning"
And the night before ?"
1t was Sunday, sage Ching-too-fum and
she only went to the Oratorio."
Mistaken mother!' exclaimed the aston
ished sage. Dare you charge the skookools
and the iooioos with the consequences ofyom
own folly? The evil spirit Of which your
daughter is possessed is the demon of the mid
night theatre and morning ball Go and sin
no more
1t was shown that the third martyr miss
of sixteen studied her lesson an hour every
evening.
What does she do then ?"
She reads, great Ching-tod-fum, till mid
night" replied the mother.
What does she 'readY'
The New York Ledger, or the Library
OF Romance She is very fond of reading,
and has deyoured the contents of all the nov
els in seven circulating libraries. She has
fine talents, and will one day become an au-
thoress, if the skookools and the iooioos don't
kill her; for She has already written tale
IN ten chapters, called The Disappointed
Damsel or, The Red Dragon of the Cow
House II yon please worshipful Ching-too-
im' will give you the leading incidents Of
the story, which are"
Silence, woman ~ Numbered the inquisi-
tor Burn her novels, and send her to bed
at nine O'Clock -
The fourth martyr was declared to be vast
ing herself, inch by inch, in Intellectual strug-
giles to keep up with her class
"Send for her foofoo," said the sage and
the ioofoo came.
Worm of the earth dare you sacrifice
the health and life Of this tender maiden by
imposing unseemly tasks upon herr" demand
ed the great inquistor "Why didn't you
send her down into the next class ?"
May it please your excelency, most mag
nlcent Ching-too-fum, | would fain have done
so, but her maternal parent threatened me
with a thousand ills il / presumed to degrade
the child of her love-" replied the terrified
foofoo. 81 reasoned with mother, and | rca-
soned with daughter | assured them it was
no disgrace but neither would consent"
Is that so ?" asked the sage.
81 would have him know that my dauch-
ter is as good as anybody else's daughter and