The Sweetwater forerunner. [volume] (Sweetwater, Tenn.) 1867-1869, 1868-12-10
Where the Laugh Comes In

child was recently killed by his shadow
falling on it.
DR.. Mex, asking permission of young
lady to kiss her, she replied, $40, sir! l
never like 4 doctors bill stuck in my
face"
"Boy, may I inquire where Robinson's
store isl" "Certainly, SIR" Swell,
where is it 2" 81 have not the least idea,
your honor"
A fast young girl comments thus upon
MOrmonism elbow absurd four or FIVE
wives for one man, when the fact is, each
woman ought to have four or five hus-
bands. 1t would take about that number
to support her decently."
There is a story of man who got mar
ried because he inherited four post bed
stead, and of another man who got mar
ried because he had bought piece of silk
cheap at 4 sale, and wanted wife to give
it to.
"Did any of you ever see an elephants
skin :" asked a teacher of an infant class.
81 have" shouted six year old from the
foot of the class. "Whera?" asked the
teacher. Con an elephants back" replied
the boy, laughing.
A noted divine was lecturing on the
suficiency of huran testimony to estab-
lish the truth of miracles, when pupil
suggested a practical application of the
doctrine. "What would you say, sir, if |
stated that as I was coming up College
street I saw the lamp post at the corner
dancer" II should ask where you had
been, my SON." was the grave reply.
"Doctor," said lady, 81 want you to
prescribe for me-" "There is nothing the
matter, madam" said the doctor, after
feeling her pulse; "you only need rest"
"Now, doctor, just look at my tongue"
she persisted-"Just look at it, Now say
what does that need 2" 81 think that needs
rest too" replied the doctor.
a country surgeon, who was bald, was
on visit to u friends house, whose serv-
ant wore 4 wig. After bantering him Il
considerable time, the doctor said: "You
see how bald I am and yet don't wear a
wig" "True, sir" replied the servant,
"but an empty barn requires no thatch."
A Quaker, on hearing man swear at a
very bad piece of road, said: "Friend, l
am under great obligations to thee. l
would myself have done what thou hast
done, but my religion forbids me. Don't
let my conscience, however, bride thee I;
give thine Indignation wings and suffer
not the prejudice of others to paralyze
TIE tongue of justice. Yea, verify"
A servant, sweeping out gentleman's
room, found sixpence on the carpet and
carried it to the owner. "You may keep
it for your honesty" said he. A short
time after he missed his gold pencil-case,
and inquired of his servant if he had found
it. eyes, sir" was the reply. "And
what did you do with t." "Kept it for
my honesty, sir" The gentleman disap-
peared.
"NIadam," said very polite traveller to
testy old landlady, "if [ see proper to
help myself to this milk is there any i'm
propriety in it 7"
81 don't know that you mean to insin-
uate that there is anything nasty in that
milk, but if you do I'll give you to I'M
stand that you've struck the wrong horse.
There amt the first hair in it, for as soon
as Martha Ann told me that the cat was
drowned in the milk l went light straight
and strained it over again"
The young man tainted.
A poor man, on his death-bed made his
will. He called his wife to him and told
her of its provisions. 81 have left" said
he, "my horse to my parents; sell it and
hand the money to them. l leave to you
my dog; take good care of him and he
will serve you faithfully" The wife
promised to obey and in due time set out
for the neigboring market with the horse
and dog. GLOW much do you want for
your horse p inquired farmer. 81 can.
not sell the horse alone, but you may have
them both at reasonable rates. Give me
500 for the dog and 81 for the horse.
The farmer laughed, but as the terms
we're low he willingly accepted them.
I'll h. L b,,ohn nd