Wyoming democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Wyoming Co., Pa.) 1867-1940, 1867-10-02
JIM WOLF AND THE TOM CATS.

ries. He knows how to make the reader
laugh, and If the following does not pro-
woke smile, it is because there Is no
mirth in mankind during the hot weather.
knew by the sympathetic glow upon his
bald head knew by the thoughtful look
upon his face--I knew by the emotional
flush upon the strawberry on the end OF
the old free liver's nose, that Simon Whee-
ler's memory was busy with the olden
time. And so l prepared to leave, be-
cause all these were Renaissance signs
that he was going to be delivered of an-
other of his tiresome personal experience
but | was too slow he got the start OF
me. As nearly as l can recolect. the ln-
Fiction was couched in the following Ian
guage: -..
I'VE were all boys, then, and didn't
care for nothing, and didn't have no troub-
les, and didn't worry about nothing only
how to shirk school and keep up revivin'
state of devilment all the time. Thish var
Jim Wolf | was talkin' about, was the
prentice, and he was the best hearted fel.
! Ter, he was, and the most forgiVin' aud on
selfish ever see--well there couldn't be
a more bullier boy than what he was, take
him how you would; and sorry enough |
was when ! seen him for the last time.
"Me and Harry was always Fostering
him and plastering hoss-bills on bis back
and putting humble bees in bis bed, and
so on. and sometimes, we'd crowd in and
bunk with him, outstanding his growing,
| and ,hen we'd let on to get mad and fight
acrost him, so as to keep him stirred up
| like. He was nineteen, he was, and long
and lank, and bashful, and we was fifteen
and sixteen, and tolerably lazy and worth
less.
80 that night, you know, that my sister
Mary give the candy pullin, they started
MS off 10 bed early, so as the company
would have full swing, and we rung in on
Jim to have some fun.
"Our winder looked onto the roof of the
ell and about ten o'clock couple of old
tom cats got to rarin' and chargin' around
on it and carryin' on like sin. There was
| four inches of snow on the roof, and it
was frozen so that there was right smart
| crust of ice on il, and the moon was shin
ing bright, and we could see them cats like
daylight. First they'd stand off and e-yow
vow, Just the same as if they was cussn'
one another, you know, and cow up their
backs and push up their tails and swell
around and spit, and then all Of sudden
the gray cat held snatch handful Of fur
out of the yalier cats ham, and spin her
around, like button on barn door. But
the waller cat was game, and he'd come
and clnch, and the way they'd gouge,
and bite, and howl; and the way they'd
make the fur fly was powerful.
"Well, Jim got disgusted with the row,
and lowed he'd climb ont there and shake
them otf'n that roof. He hadn't really no
notion of doin' it, likely, but we everlast-
in'ly dogged him, and bully ragged him,
and towed he'd always Dragged how he
wouldn't take dare, and so on, till blme-
by he histed up the winder, and 10! and
behold you, he went-went exactly as he
was--nothin' on but a shirt, and it was
short. But you ought to have seen him Z!
You ought to see him creeping over that
ice, and diggin' his toe nails and finger
nails in for to keep from sEppin'; and
above all, you ought to seen that shirt q
flappin' in the wind, and them long, ridic-
ulous shanks of his'n glisteain' in the
moonlight
"Them company folks was down there
under the caves, the whole squsd of 'em
under that ornery shed of old dead WaslIn'
ton Bower vines--all se,tin' round about
two dozen sassers of hot candy, which
thev'd sot in the snow to cool. And they
was laughin' and talkn' lively; but bless
you they didn't know nothin bout the
panorama that was goin' on over their
heads. Well, Sim he went a sreakin' and
sneakin' up, unbeknown to them tom cats,
they was a swiskin' their tails and VOW
yowin' and threateniu' to clinch, you know
aud not payin' any attention--he went a
sneakin' right up TO the comb Of the roof,
till he was 10 foot'n' half of 'em, and
all of sudden he made grab for the yal-
Ter cat !! But by Gosh he missed fire and
slipt his hair, and his heels few up and
he Topped on his back and shot off that
) roof like dart--went smasbd' and a
crashin' down through them old rusty
vines and landed right in the dead centre
r fall them compny people--sot down
like a yearthquake in them two dozen sas
sers of red hot candy and let off a howl
J that was bark from the tomb! Them
; girls-well they felt you know. They
E he wern't dressed for comp'ny, aud so they
-, left. All done IN second; it was just
one little war, ,whoop. and wisk OF theil
| dresses, and blame the wench of 'em wa:
4 in sight any where! .. OIL. a' ...L "
r "Jim he was sight. He was covered
t with that bilin' hot molasses candy clear
down to his heels, and bad more BLASTED
sassers hangin' to him than if he was al
Iniin princess--an he come prancin W
stairs fust whoopin' and a cussin, an'
every jump be shed some china, and ever.
squirm be fetched he drippcd some candy
"And blistered Why, bless your sou
, that poor creter couldn't really set dow
: comfortable for as much as four weeks"
r Go-5f 9esA - -.o, 1++
Most men seem to consider their schoo