The Tipton advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Cedar Co., Iowa) 1856-1962, 1867-01-17
Tho 'sl;ppsry Heels. |"


Heels" who have : park at the East
End, has recently been established. No
one II eligible for membership who has
ever been on skates ,prsy10ns to admis-
sion into the clNl IA none are retain
ed after they havi Gnesirsd any pso6-
1ency In The art. T1lslr evolutions are
truly marvellous, the llkatsn aypsasing
to use their most strenuous endsavon to
skate on any other portions of their bod
iss except their feee. Away e0e goes on
one knee, then another on al fohrs, an
other on his back, with both feet in the
air, while smother II seen - be going It
on his heod. @a a
They are constantly applying pound
"a ioe b some p0rtions of their bodiss
- II to allay inflammation. The treat
ment appears to be little rough to .
casual observer, yet they persist In It.
Pounding ice with the spinal base and
the back Of the head-sometimes with
the top Of the head or nose-cannot GER
tainly be the easiest way of pulverizing
that substance.
A spectator who was present the other
night, asked "slippery Heel' why he
didn't use beetle, sledgs hammer, or
pile driver to pound the ice with, in
stead Of that portion Of his body that his
coat tails cover, and spectator would
have been pounded worse than the ice
was, If the "slippery Heel" could have
caught him, which he couldn't, of
course, although the spectator was q
cripple and on crutches.
The President of the club is man
whose head has been whitened by frosts
of many winters, and cracked by the
concussion Of many Ealls, yet he skates
little worse, If anything, than he did
when he first put himself on runners.
He has held the Office ever since the
club started. He had to run against
several candidates, but he beat 'em all.
He 10 used to running against people.
He never skates without running against
everybody on the ice. In fact, he can
run against everything except the wind.
None Of the 'Slippery Heels" can do
that.
One member was seen to do it once,
and he was elected from the Park rs
soon as the indignant 8. H. 3 could catch
him, which they didn't do until they
had taken their skates off. They can't
catch anything with skates on-they
can't even catch cold, or the measles.
1t is amusing TO see Slippery Heel
try to do the agreeable to q lady on
skates. He attempts to take her hand
and lead her gently forth Tor fifth, as
the numerical case may be-, when the
treacherous irons run back without any
apparent reason, and in his efforts to
prevent falling upon his nose, he paws
the air like an adolator trying to propi-
tiate his wooden god. Regaining his
equilibrium, he cautiously approaches
her again, and contrives to get posses
sion of her hand. He studies his steps
very closely-minces them, as you might
say.
It is a sort of "little boats must keep
near the shore" style Of skating. He
detects the foot nearest her in vicious
attempt to trip the lady up, and just
barely illustrates it. Then the other foot
asserts Its independence-or, perhaps,
don't like to associate with foot that
would try to trip lady-and starts off
on little expedition of its own. A good
doa1 NJ dif47 orlf&y "a opo1,,p<o.ol l., ,>o.
suading the foot to abandon so rash a
step. And SO they go. He fears to
strike out-sure to strike on his nose =
and II he stands still down he drops.
They think seriously of having the
ice cushioned SO as to break the fall
Several have adopted the ingenious ex-
pedient of strapping their skates on their
knees. In this way they don't have so
far to fall by two feet and half leg, at
least. They don't need to practice skat-
ing backward, all being backward skat-
ers from the first.
Ifa member IL caught In the act of
falling, no one Is allowed to catch him.
Cold water is the only beverage allow
ed. As soon as two slippery Heels-or
a pair of them, If you will-fall in to-
gether, the ice being broken, they 60 in
for cold water all over.
my dear, you are q duck, }" says .
masculine Slippery Heel languishing
ION skates) In an enamored way by the
side of his enamorer.
my dear, you are ducking," replies
the lady as he glides into an air hole,
and disappears..
We are promised the rules Of the
slippery Heels" which we shall take
pleasure In publishing.-Cin. Times.
Jefferson Davis.
A correspondent Of the New York
Times gives an account Of Jefferson
Davis's appearance which conveys q
somewhat different impression from
those lately published. The writer,
whose letter is dated at Richmond says
"While Colonel Stanton was paying
these sable warriors jefferson Davis,
walking the ramparts that have 90 long
been to him the worlds boundary, pass