Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-04-22
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MRS udIe Thinks ..It 1vouId Look
well IOzReep Their q eading OaY.,,

MRS c .udle Thinks .sIt would Look
keiIlozKeep Ghefr u edding pay"
.CaHdlessldve. 40 you know what next
Sunday is 2 No you don't? Well, was
there ever sueha strange man! Can't YOU
guess darling !? Next Sunday, dear p
Think, love. a fliinute-just think. Whdt!
dstd you don't k1aoto noeo? (? Hal if [ hadn't a
better MEMORY than you, don't know how
we should ever get en.-Welk then, pet
shall Itell you what next Sunday is p
Whysathen, its our wedding day-what are
you groaning at, Mr.. Caudle? Idon't see
anything to groan at. If anybody should.
groan, IN sure it isn't you. No; L rather
think It's i who ought to grean.
Oh, dear! Th It's fourteen years ago.
You were very different man then, Mr..
Caudle. What DO you say? And a1Gs a
Uery different agonaar? Not at ali-jlist the
same. On, you needn't roll your head
about on the pillow in that way say. just
the same. Well, then,- if I'm altered,
whose fault is it !? Not mine, I'm sure
certainly not. Don't tell me that 1 couldn't
talk atall tben--Icould talk just as well then
as l can now; only then / hadn't the same
cause. Its you VINO have made me talk
WHAT do you say! You're oery sor7yJor tt2
Caudles you do nothing but insult me.
"Ha! You were a good-tempered nice
creature fourteen years ago, and would
have done any thing for.me. Yes, yes, if a
woman would be always cared for she
Of, the charm, when she goes TO church!
We're all ange,s while you're courting us
but once married, how soon you pull our
wings Off No. Mr.. Caudle, Pm not talk
ing nonsense; but the truth is. you like to
hear nobody talk but yourself. Nobody
eyertells me that talk nonsense but you.
Now, it's no use your turning and turning
ab0utin that way; it's not a bit of-whaC
doyOu say |? YouU get up 2 No, you won't,
Candles you'll not serve ME that trick
again; for I've locked the door and hid the
key. There's no getting hold of you in
day-tlme- but here you can't leave me.
You neednlt grOan again, Mr.. Caudle.
SHOW Caudle, dear, do let US talk comfort
ably. After all, love, there's good many
folks Who'll dare say, don't get on half so
well as we've done. We've both our little
tempers, perhaps, but you are aigsgraYating;
you must own that Candle. Well. never
mind we won't talk of it; I won't scold
you now. Well talk of next Sunday, love.
We never have kept our wedding-day, and
think it would be nice uay TO have our
friends. What do you say? They'd think it
hspocrtsg2 Nc, hypocrisy at all. am sure
Try to be CO nfortable: and if ever man
was happys yoar ought to be. No. Caudle,E
nO; it I'M t nonsense to keep wedding g-days s;
itisn't deception on the world aud if it.
is, how many people do it ? Pm sure its
only a proper compliment that man owes
to his wife. Look at the Winkles-don't
bU0y give a aQluuBTzZGNeTY YEAR, veil, l.
know, and If they do fight alittIe in the
course of the year. that's nothing to do
with it. They keep their Wedding-day,
and their acquaintancesr have nothing 10 90
with anything else. e.2N4-s AA1S(
LAS say, Caudle, it's only proper COM
pliment a man owes to bis wedding day
1t is as much as to say to the whole world,
'There, if had to marry again, my blessed
wife's the only woman I'd chooseY Well
/ see nothing to groan at, Mr.. Caudle-no,
nor to sigh at either; but know what you
mean; Im sure what would have become
of you, if you hadn't married as you have
doue-why. you'd have been lost crea-
ture! l know it; know your habits, Cau-
dles and--I don't like to say it-but you'd
have been little better than ragamuffin.
Nice scrapes you'd have got into, 1 know,
if you hadn't had me to keep you respecta-
ble-and what's my thanks? Ha! 1 only
wish you'd had some women!
"But we won't quarrel, Caudle. No;
you don't mean anything, l know. Well
have this little dinner, eh? just few
frieRds?} Now don'tsay you don't care
that isn't the Way to speak to wife; and
especially the wife I've been to you, eau
die. Well, you. agree to the dinner, eh? P
Now don't grunt, Mr.. Gaudle, but speak
out You'll keep your wedding day? What?
If IN let you 90 to sleeps? Ha, that's un-
manly, Caud1e; can't You say Yes with
out any thing else? l say-can'6 you say
'Yes ?tAThere, bless you! i knew you
would.
Aud now, Caudle, what shall we have
for dinmer? Move won't talk OF it to-
morrow; we'll talk of it now, and then it
viii be off my MUD. / should like some
thing particular = something out of the
way@iust to show that we thought the
daE, something. . she0ld like-Mr. Cau-
die, yoa,re not asleep? What do + 1cdnt 2
Why, you know l want TO settle about
the 1di6ner. Have acltat I like {? No; as it.
is yourofancy TO keep the day, it's only
right that 1 should try to please you. We
never bad ono. Caudle; so what DO you
think of a haunch of venison What do
youssays?es Mutton soiU do !? Ha! that shows
what%Ots stfIinkiof your wife; dare say If
it was with anyof your club friends.any
of your pot5house eompanioBs-yoH'd have
no objection to yenisun. / say it-What do
you nlntter? Let it be 0enison? Very well.
And now about the fish What do you
think of a nice turbot? No. Mr.. Cdudle,
brill won't dot shah be turbot, or there
shan,t be any fish at all.-Oh, what a mean
mausyou are. Caudlei Shall it be turbot?
ItshGU3 And now about the soup-now;
CaudIe. don't swear at the soup in tLat
manner: you know there must be SOUP
Well. once in a way, and just to show our
friends how happy we have BEEN, we will
have some real turtle. No you soon !, you " |
kuce nothing but mock p Fhtn9 Mr.. Caudle,
YOU may SIT at the table by yourself. Mock
turtle on Wedding day Was there ever !
such an insuIt3 What do you say! Let tt |
be real tkegls for once? Ha, iCaudle as say, |