The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1867-02-13
R GU S

III kEXIIEI
Mrs. ADAM.-''t ACCORDING to Mil
ton, Eve kept silence in Eden to hear
her husband talk" said a gentleman
to a lady friend, and then added, in a
melancholy tone, 'Alas! there have
been no Ewes since. ,sbgd 21i-3 =
80 :" Because there, have been no has-
bands worth listening to, was the
quick retort. = 'o''''' '7'-' aeiiert
Bridget, how came you to burn the
bread SOP" "Ochi an is it burned it
is? Sure, then, man am, Eut it's no
fault1of mine,ivfor wasn't you after
telling me las thing afore you whit
out, a large loaf must bake one hour.
and made three large loaves, SO /
baked EN- three hours jist; for what
else should / do2n baGis 9al ei1 a'
A lady, writing upon the subject,
says: HWhen men break their hearts,
it is the same as when I a lobster
breaks one of his. claws-another
sprouting Immediately and growing in
ifs tllace 1NBDeIHH no 81slo7t 9tb ~
= The pompous epitah of a close-fst-
ed citizen closed with the following
passage of Scripture: a'He that giveth
/ to- thehpoorI lendeth- to 1.-THE Lord. .
" That may be- aohloqpised Sambo,
but when dat man died the Lord
didn't owe him a red CEN"
In a Templars,, Lodge, ayoung lady,
after a spirited prelude, giving a glow
ing description of the goodness Of cil
der, andTits usefulness, CLOSED with
: and, brethren. cider is a necessity to
me, and | must. nave it, [ shall
have it. If it is decided that we are
not to drink cider, L shall eat apples,
and get some fine young man to
squeeze me- for, / tell you that /
can't live withoutlthat delightful nee
tar, the juice of the apple |"
A young lady went to picnic, and,
on being asked what picnic was, she
replied: . It's going out into the
hills and getting your dress all dirty,
and breaking your parasol.ne a949.
8 A coxcofnb asked a barber's boy
81 Did you ever shave a monkey2F ii
Is Ne, sir, but if you will be pleased
to sit down, I'll t-t-try. adj flov
A t"BRIDALl CHAMBER = The
Wisconsin, Union tells good story of
a newly married couple, who stopped
at frst-dassl Hotel. Phe bridegroom,
in a manner showing his newly ac-
CURED im1Ortsnceli in life, called for a
room-=the best the house. afforded.
He didn't want any common fare, but
1.-THE best they bad, and he had the
money to fDoti the9bill. The landlord
very pleasantly inquired eff he WASH {
| from the tountry, and just, married?i
Yes, he was from the, coUn try, and
Just married, and he wanted the best
room in the house. and he didn't care
a. darn for the expensesi11s Then
says the landlord, you want the bril-
I dal chamter?" Why, yes," says the.
countryfnan, not exactly comprehend,
Ling the matter, - / guess so; at any
rate, send it up; if | don't want it,
Sal will We suppose it was sent up.
biz gtWake up here, and pay for your
said a deacon, as he nudged
a. sleepy WOfshipper with the con-
tributions9ox.o4 en3peAl W9a aoiAH
| + lean net.-bear children said
Mrs. Prim disdainfally. IN sDdt
Mrs, Ratington, looking, over dher
spectacles, mildly replied, T" Perhaps,
if you cold, you would Ike them
better.lh D dt3I 9dl n390t9d ,.faoa
8 .AnsIrishboy trying hard to get a
place, denid that he was Irish.nlf''iI
Edon't know what you mean by not
being an Irshman.d said the gentle
man who WIS about to hire him, - but
this / do know, that you were born In
| Ireland" Oh your honortif that's
all.rsmall bame=that. Suppose your
! old cat had kittens in the oven, would
1 they be loaIes of bread?' The boy
4 got the plae. .9aI-..sa.. L.