The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1867-09-26
NO. Fl.
An Adventure in the Cars.

mere were i've OF us-yeS, hve as hap
py fellows as were let loose from college
lt was vacation" and we concluded to
take trip to the Falls. We got on
BOARD the cars at n, and were soon travel
Ing very rapidly toward our destination.
we had just seated ourselves and pre-
! pared Tor a comfortable smoke, when in
came the conductor, and who should it
be but our friend Fred B. After the
common salutation, GLOW are YOU old
fellow?' &c, had passed, Fred said he had
some business for us to attend to.
"Out with it, old chum ~ said we;
anything at all will be acceptable, so let
US have it r'
"Well, boys" said Fred, in conf
Dental tone, ''in the next car there is as
lovin pair as it was ever my lot to see.
lhey are going down to Fl. to get mar
RED, and now, if you can have any fun,
over 1t, just pitch in. Phey must be-
cared for, and | don't known who can do.
it better than you"
In moment Fred was gone, and we
set our heads together to from a plan for
''taking care of the lovers"
81 have it, boys ~ said Bill Steevers
''we must make the girl think that her
lover is married."
"That's it, that's it p said we, not Civ
ing him time to flush the sentence.
''That he is married man and the
father of children % said Bill.
That's the game, boys; now let us
play it r'
1t devolved upon me to commence oper-
ations. According, [ entered the car in
which we were informed the lovers were
The girl, thinking, suppose, that she.
must give her lover all the seat, sat on his
knee; and he, for the purpose of protect
ing her, of course, had thrown his arms
around her waist; and SO they sat, in real
soft lovers style.
All this [ gathered at glance Step
ping up to them, | said
"Why, Jones, what in the deuce are.
you doing with this girl 2"
The girl arose hastily and seated her
self on the seat.
'See, here, stranger'r' said the fellow,
'you're bit mistaken N name isn't
Jones'"
"Why, Jones'" said I, ''you certainly
haven't left your wife and children, and
lilSt " p1itH youLSCl1 Ou Aol d sibSlo
man, have you r'
Il tell you my name amt Jones it's
Harper.-It never was Jones faint
agoin' to be, nuther! !"
merely shook my head and passed to
auother seat to see the rest of the fun The
girl looked "wild" after | sat down but
Jones alias Harper soon convinced her
that [ was mistaken
About the time they had got feeling
right well again, in came Elliott Gregg.
Walking up to Harper, he accosted him
with
"Why, you here? How did you leave.
your wife and babies 2"
"See here, stranger, you amt the first
man that's called me Jones to day, an l
reckon | must look awfully like him, but
l hain't Jones. | haiu't got any wife, nor
babies either; but this gal an ne is agoin'
to splice, an then you can talk about my
wife-and | wouldn't wonder but what
in the course of time you might talk
about the babies too, but you mustn't CALI
me Joncs!' %
The retort brought forth vociferous.
laughter from the spectators, and it also
brought bushes to the face of the girl.
"Ah, Jones'" said Gregg, ''you will
regret this in the future. | pity your
vile and this poor girl
80, Harper your real name is JONES'
is it ?-an' you've been foolin' me, have
you? Well, We amt sphced yet, an L
don't think we will be soon," said the
girl, and her eyes fairly flashed Are.
"Jane, janet p said Harper, "don't
you known I'm Bill Harper. There amt
darn drop of Jones blood in me, an
III prove it
At this moment JEFF Jackson, BilE
Steevers aud jim Byers entered, and, Of
course, their attention was called 10 Har-
per by his loud talking. They stepped
upon to him, and said
"Why, Jones, what is all this fuss
about ?"
This was more than Harper could
stand He leaped upon seat
no. said he, my name is not Jones,
an l can lick the fellow that says it is :"
BY this time We got to H., and our
friend Fred came into the car and Har-
per kept quiet The girl that wouldn't
be spliced requested Fred to help her on
the train that was going BACK to---
while he, and the notorious Jones, alias
Harper, followed her, We learned after
wards that he proved himself to be Bill
Harper instead of Bill Jones, and he and
his gal Jane ''got sphced."
The Union Republican State Commit
tee have opened rooms at ll05 Chestnu-
street, Philadelphia, which viii be THEFT
headnuarters until the election of 1867 IS