davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
BesieEed by Cats.

Mr.. Charles Pau, at 462 Main street
dry goods .business-wanted cat.
His desire for companion of the feline
species was not aroused by fond recol-
lections of the delights of childhood, in
making fire come out of pussy's back, or
pulling pussy's tail, or in making pussy
puss show its speed in chasing string
He wanted cat for use-one that could
catch rats. So anxious was he to obtain
a good cat, that he proposed to invest
ten dollars in such an animal. For the
truth of these Introductory remarks, We
refer our readers to the advertisement,
clipped from yesterdays issue:
"Wanted- Cat-One that catches
rats. For good one ten dollars will
be paid. Call at Charles Pfau's, 462
Main street."
Mark the business like terseness and
comprehensiveness of the words.
This appeal stirred catdom yesterday:
Early in the morning scores of young
cat-catchers were to be seen securing
back yards and alleys in pursuit of good
looking cats, and by nine o'clock fully
three score and ten victims of the chase
were thrust at Mr.. Pau. and for each a
demand of ten dollars was made. The
store was literally besieged by urchins
with their arms full of cats-black cats,
white cats, speckled cats, lady cats,
Thomas cats, ancient cats and Juvenile
cats. 1t is not difficult to imagine the
CONSERVATION at 462 Main street, that
was occasioned by this invasion. We
presume, however, that Mr.. Pau was
enabled to make good selection.
p. S.-Since the above was written
gentlemen, covered with cats hair, has
presented himself at our Office. repre
senting himself as Charles Pau, and
with many manifestations of extreme
indignation, declared that he never had
a cat, never wanted a cat, and know,
nothing of the advertisement, save as hi
has seen it in print.-Cincinnati Com
merciaL. oG
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
Val RIETIES.

George Augustus Sala declares that
an American who can speak no language
but his own can make his way over the
continent of Europe better than an Eng
lishman who speaks half dozen others
huently. ~
The editor of one of the Bridgeport
(Connecticut) papers goes into ecstacies
over four giant Strawberries just pre-
sented to him. The gentleman who
raised them has had straw wberries, from
the same vine, on his table every week
since June. and expects to have more
till the cold weather of January sets
in. ra s.-.....I
Mrs. Margaret Conover. of Dayton,
who, owing to stiff, knee,joint, has
been a cripple for seventeen years,
missed chair in attempting to sit
down, a few days ago, and fell heavily
to the floor. Her weight came on the
crooked knee, swapping some muscles.
and curing the limb. 1t may be proper
to suggest, however, that this sort of
surgery should not be too freely in
troduced by practical philanthropists.
A New York paper says of NH Reil-
lez, new French actress performing
there: "She gives dash of the can-can,
she emakes uncouth noises with her mouth;
she laughs, she weeps, she entreats, she
insults, with the most variable grace
Although there are features in her per-
formance to which we are not accustomed
on the American stage. the audiences al
the French Theater seem to enjoy every
thing she does, and applaud her most
heartily" a ,2 .fl O.. ''@
Mr.. Joseph Tull, baker to the Queer
of England. was lately tried by the
Windsor magistrates for selling bread
otherwise than by weight 1t was proved
that his man had, on the 10Th of Septem
Der, sold "quartern cottage loaf" which
was deficient in weight thirteen ounces
In defense it was urged that the loaf wa.
'.fancy" bread, and so not liable to b,
weighed when sold, as provided by til,
act. The Bench fined defendant Is. Cd
and 14s. costs, at the same time acuuit
ting him of any intention to evade the
law
Mexico allows marriage by proxy
The latest and most notable case of thi:
kind has just occurred at Mazatlan, tn,
parties being dashing young American
widow-Mrs. Maria Anna Bowman, me-
McKenty, late of San Francisco-anc
the distinguished General Ramon Corona
commander of the army of the West
Being in the field in the State of Jalisco
at the head of his division, he could no
go North to meet his bride, and so TIL
ceremony was performed by proxy, h
being represented by Senior Sepulveda
Collector of Customs at Mazatlan Th
lady Immediately started by steamer t.
join her husband at Guadalajara.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
) OYSTERSl OYSTERS!

OYSTERs RECEIvED DAILY
~. HUSTON & CO., Oy.ter Packers. Nos. lsl
1ss Chestnut strtst. Baltimore and Cham erlain'
No S5 North High street. tf-
All orders by mail viii receive prompt attention.
A liberal discount to dealers. octlS-dlm
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15

The Emperor Francis Joseph's uni
form, when he rode in state through
Paris by the side of Napoleon, was clar-
et-colored pantaloons with gold stripes,
hat with scarlet feathers, a white Cash
mere tunic with silver buttons, and
across the grand Gordon of the Legion
of Honor. $50 .a'E
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15

In Paris there is collection of thir-
teen hundred newspapers, published in
all parts of the world La Liberte, COM
menting on this, says that according to
a careful estimate, there are 12,500news-
papers now published in the world. In
Europe, 1000; America, 5000; Asia,
Africa, &C., 500. Their total daily cir
culation is estimated at twelve million
sheets. '- 80
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
FRIDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER Is, 1867.
oFACEEsTIIE...

The plaything of child is doll
the god of a man is dollar. s'i eaa
Why is a dandy pickpocket like a
heavy sea2 Because he is dangerous
swell. i.i'' tit..'i .'-s..''l 7i'fz. a2i
A QUEER PUN.-Why should tee
totaler never have wife Because he
will not supporter. 81.
There is many man whose tongue
might govern multitudes, if he could
only govern his tongue. tl -ss.r -.
We once knew boy who said that
he ''liked good rainy day; too rainy
to go too school, and just about rainy
enought to go fishing" av .s... =
| In Cork, a short time ago, the crier
endeavored to dispense crowd by ex-
claiming, "All ye blackguards that isn't
lawyers quit the Court y $50 40 7m
A kiss on the forehead denotes respect
and admiration; on the cheek, friend
ship; on the eyelids, tender sentiment +;
on the lips, love. The young men in
this vicinity have not much respect for
the young ladies" "A' '-'-s So
Hearts, the best card in the chance
game of matrimony; sometimes over
come by diamonds and knaves; often
also won by tricks; and occasionally
treated in shuff1ing manner, and then
cut altogether.
""How do you find yourself, Mrs
,Judyl" said surgeon, after taking of
the arm of an Irish woman. How dc
l find myself? why, without my arm
how else should 1 find myself?"
i Mrs. Partington says: .'For my par
| I can't deceive what on airth eddicatiol
is coming to. When l was young, if ;
gal only understood the rules of distrac
tion, provision, multiplying, replenish
ing and common denominator, and knew
all about thr rivers and their obituaries
the covenants and their dormitories, tn
provinces and umpire, they had eddica
ton enough. But now they have t
study bottomy, algerbay, and have t
j, demonstrate suppositions about the syc
ophants of parrallelagrams, to say moth
ing of OK hides, asheads, cowsticks, an
obtuse triangles." Here the old lad
was So CoHIuSeu WIFI tecnnlcdl name
that she broke down.
He who cocks his hat on one side is
bully or coward; he who wears
thrown backwards is simpleton. Th
, man who wears his hat forward is bar
terer and sneerer, and he who hal
buries his eyes beneath his castor, is
. rogue. ..-
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
C. DUcREuX'S PATENT
For Instantaneous Detachment Of Horses
q from Carriages. 81 hl G..

THIS INGENIOUS AND VERY USE
i full invention. which has been patented in the
United States, France and England. is now offered
by the subscriber to the pu lie. feeling assured
they will find it, upon examination, one of the
greatest inventions of the age.
! Prominent among its advantages are:
FIRsr-The facility with which horses may be
h8rnessed to or unharnessei from Carriage; also,
rendering it unnecessary for tt person unharness
ing to pass between behind the horses is GUS
tomary, thus avniding any liability of being kicked.
SkCoND-In case of horse falling. he may be
lopsed from the rriase in one second. without the
driver leaving his seat. 1t is simple in its oper
alton that child GIN work it. n f-st-- /, .sti
THIRO AND GREArEsT-In case of horses taxing
fright, becomin. unmanag able running away,
the terrib consequences which 30 frequently fol-
low may all be av lied by this simple application
to arrages. as the ho ses ca, be loosed from hss
CIrridge in a t,cinh,iTg." and the Carriage as
quickly and sGf ty stopped.
Mr.. DUCREU& gave several publie exhihi-
tions. The great favor and praise manifested by
the public ON these occasions. rs one of tie evil
dences OF popular appreciation of its merits.
Terms may be known and orders received for ap-
ing the patent to Carriages purchase of State
- G. DUCREUX Pateutee,
oct29 d3m % Elizabeth street. New \ ork.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15

"a GALLON of strong lye put into a
barrel of hard water it is said will make
it as soft as rain water.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
TO LADIES.


If you require a reliable remedy to restore you,
and remove Irreguarit es or DISTINCTIONS. why not
use the best? a.-r--'F
Every lady knows the SLIGHTEST irregularity of na
ture is liable bring on Headache Giddiness, Low
Spirits Painting Hrs.erics. &c.; then the bloom
health fades. the aP ct e fails, and other symptoms
more distressing .lIence, as Weakness, Spinal
Complaint, the Whites. Prolapsus, &C.. &c. A
never failing remedy will be found in
DIR. HARVEY'S FEMALE PILLS.
The experience of thir years has proved thes
have no equal for Removing Instructions and lr
reguarities. 40 MATTER FROM WHAT CAUSE THEY
ARISE. TEe are safe and sure in every case. Up
wards of so, GOO boxes sold annually, and
plant of their eficacy is ever heard, for they
complish what u ey ere represented to do,,
Sold in boxes C0ntdinin0 Sisty Pius. Price One
Dollar. K y54it-s.-r .sr-= ,-.
DIR. HARVEY,S GOLDEN PILLS
is remedy four degrees stronger { an the above
and intended for special cases OF long standing.
- Price FIVE Dollars per Box url-l 6.
If you cannot purchase the Pills of your Drus
gist. they will be sent by mail. post paid, secure
from observation. on receipt of the money. by Dir
JAMES BRYAN Consulting Physician sl9 Broa T.
way. New YORK. For sale b, Druzgists generally.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
The captious chap who ttered that,
Hal either no head or no hat.


At an evening party gentleman saw
a young lady approaching whom he had
the misfortune to offend. He extended
his hand and said, Good evening,
Mary" "Miss Mary, if you please"
"We can miss you, Mary, only when
you are ABSENT he replied, and they
were soon reconciled. The young lady
hopes that she will soon be missed no
more.
"Amelia, for thee-yes, at thy COM
mand, I'd tear this eternal armament
into thousand fregments-I'd gather
the stars one by one, as they tumbled
from ETHEREAL space, and put them in my
trowsers pockets; I'd pluck the sun,
that oriental God of Day, that travels
the blue arch of day in such majestic
splendor-I'd tear him from the sky and
quench its bright effulgence in the foun-
tain of my eternal love for thee !''
Amelia-"Don't Henry, it would be
so very dark" e~af
An excellent turn was given at the
dinner table by Judge Hoar, of Massa'
chusetts, too good to be lost. A gentle.
man remarked that Mr.. A., who used to
be given to sharp practice, was getting
to be more circumspect. Yes" replied
the Judge, he has reached the super
lative of life-he began by seeking to
get on, then he sought to get honor, and
now he is trying to get honest.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-11-15
YOUNG MEN

The experience of the past ten years has demon
strated the fact that the utmost reliance may be
placed in the efficacy of
BELLS SPECIFIC PILLS,
for the speedy and permanent cure of Seminal
Weakness, Emissions, Physical and Nervous De-
bility, Impotence, or want of power the result Of
sexual exec s, or uri 30 q ia i-s -
= -l YOUTHFUL In NDlSCRETION, rs
which, neglected, ruins the happiness and units the
and often termir ates in an uDtimely grave. Make
no delay in seeking the remedy. Bell Specific
Pills can be used without detection or interference
with business pursuits. a -t-' - -
NO HANG r OF,DIEI IS NECESSARY.
r They are entirely vegetable, and perfectly harm
less the system Each box contains go pills. with
fuffdifections and q treatise on the consequences
and cure. Price One Dollar. Beware of counter
feits! If you cannot procure Ihem OF your Drug
Ing Physician. sls Broadway, New York. and they
will be sent by return OF mail. free from observa
ton. For sale by Druggists generally. @ E.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01
A PETIzY AND AMUSING ANEcDorE.

The French dress satire in better
style than any other people. We have
capital story from the last C0uie,
des EtatS U5ais which happily illustra-
teS this fact.
In speaking of the woman Frigard,
the murderess, lately tried in Melun,
France, the Temps asks if an advocate
who defends guilty (scIerat) can act
in good faith? He answers the ques-
tion Dy relating the following anecdote:
A lawyer who had figured with some
distinction in the National Assem- bles
of the Republic, recOunted to us in
the following terms his debut: 81
was young and unsuspecting," said he,
"when l pleaded my first cause. 1t
was that Of a peasant charged with
stealing watch. The papers in the
case, the insutficiency of the evidence,
and, above all, the air of the accused
which was that of a good man-had
convinced me Of the innocence Of my
client. pleaded with all the warmth
of soul which could be inspired by this
strong faith, and acquitted the peasant.
Once free, he cast his arms around
me:
ooh, Monsiar," said he, "you spoke
well. My children shall be taught to
bless you. There is one more service
whice you must do for me-"
(Which is ?"
"Dig up the watch for me-"
Dig up the watch for you ?"
"CertainIy: You understand that
they still keep ther eyes on me, whilst
you, in your promenade, can dig it up
with your little cane and return it TO
me.
miserable wretch! then you are
guilty?"
"What! didn't you know it? If l
hadn't been guilty should have dis
pensed with lawyer and been my own
advocate ~
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01
HEALTH OF cows.

Good health in domestic animals
is always matter of primary impor
tance.
AS bad health in parents, transmit:
a tendency to disease in the offspring,
pit is important that every kind of ami
mails we desire to continue on our
farms, should be kept vigorous and
healthy.
AS domestic animals are source of
human food, it is of great importance
to preserve them in a healthy condi-
ton. Diseased meat carries its quail
ties into the stomach of its consumers.
1t is serious objection which vegetari-
ans urge against the use of animal food,
that the artificial circumstances in
which animals live, and the bad treat
ment they receive, render them un-
healthy. Asan unhealthy animal does
not consume food to as good advantage
as we'll one, it is economical to avoid
disease.
AS comparative misery and discom- ,
fort accompany disease, it is humane
as well as economical, to see that the
animals under our care enjoy as far
as possible their creature comforts.
Each Of these circumstances is suf-
hclent reason for guarding with scrupu-
lous care, the health of the animals we
feed but when we derive milk from
animals it is doubly important that
they are kept free from every objec-
tionable taint. A sickly COW not only
yieldsa diminished profit, but sheyields
a sickly milk, and sickly in a higher
degree than her flesh.
If a COW eats anything that has a
strong or disagreeable odor, it appears
in her milk.
lfa COW eats anything medicinal it !.
comes out in her milk.
If she is feverish her milk shows it.
If she has sores about her, pus may
be found in her milk.
If she is fed upon decayed or diseased
food, her milk, since it is derived from
her food, will be imperfect. 1t is as
impossible to make good milk from
bad food, as to make good building
from rotten timber.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01

engendered-came up to the scratch
and were dulyunited, to their great con.
tent and the full satisfaction of their
reverend advisers. Fees, of course.
were expected and eXacted-at first
one dollar per couple, and then, as it
was found how gullible the poor things
were, dollar each-and at this busi-
ness much money was made, one reve-
rend iniquity alone clearing, it is said,
in South Carolina, the comfortable sum
of two thousand dollars.
Concurrent with this device was the
emancipation-paper dodge, whereby
writings purporting to forever protect
the holder against enslavement, were
sold to the newly enfranchised at anv
price from five or ten dollars down TO
quarter of dollar, that it was pOssi-
bic to get. Matrimony becoming dis
tasteful and fear of reinstatement dis
appearing, some new scheme was neces-
sary, and this was forthwith presented
In the guise of pretended imminent
confiscation and redivision of rebel
lands. This rascality in all its number
less moods and lenses, has proved the
most continuously lucrative Of all, and
Is even now made the means of sue
ce5sful sWindling. In the negro mind
writings" are things of superstitious
reverence, and with a due proportion
Off1ourishes and aprOper expenditure of
red tape and revenue stamps, there are
few papers that may not be foisted up
on ninety-nine out of every hundred
among the freedmen, as comforting
special privileges and being of great
value. As deeds to plantations or
houses, or as protection from prosecn-
tlonS i'll the courts, or as gifting with |
titles, or as in some way or another
producing immense benefit, writings"
have ready sale, and are laying the
foundation gilmore thar one scoundrel- !
ly fortune. Inaddition, too, to titles"
sticks, even, have been disposed of, |
their use being to stake off the estate |
when "buckra" was finally Ousted. |
Collections at churches and at camp
meetings, initiation fees, contribution
and subscription lists, these last appeal
to fiatter their vanity, instalment pay
ments for things never intended to be
and other such devices, are
but some of the many ways of sucking
the freedmen teat. Poor creatures,
my heart has bled for them, and bIed
all the more that there is no remedy
for this spoliation. Nothing but intel
igence will foil The sharper, and inteli-
igence the benighted freedmen, launch
ed fresh on his own resources from a
state of absolute dependence, does not
possess.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01

SIGNING THE PLEDGE-IN HIS OWN
wAY.-A man long noted forintemper-
ate habits was induced by Rev. John
Abbott, to sign the pledge, Sin his own
way" which he did in these words:
Il pledge myself to drink no intoxi-
eating drinks for one year."
Few believed he would keep it; but
at the end of the year he again ap-
peard at temperance meeting, with
out having touched drop.
"Are you going to sign again ?" ask
ed Mr.. Abbott.
eyes," replied he, eff 1 can do it in
my own way"
And accordingly he signed the pledge
for ninety-nine years.
"And it," said he, 81 live to that
time it is my intention to take off
life lease"
A few days after, he called on the
tavern keeper, who welcomed him
back to his old hannts,
ooh, landlord, said he as if in pain,
81 have such a lump on my side"
'"rhat's because you have stopped
drinking" said the landlord. "You
won't live long if you keep on"
"Will drinking take that lump a.
way?"
Eyes, and ifyou don't drink" you'll
soon have a lump on the other Side.-
Come let's have drink together" and
he poured out two glasses of whisky.
81 reckon l won't drink" said the
former inebriate, especially, ifkeeping
the pledge will bring another lump,
for it isn't very hard to bear, after ALL"
and with this he drew the lump-a
roll Of greenbacks from his side pock-
ct, and walked off, leaving the land
lord to his reflections.
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01

AN AGENT OF THE LORD.-Deacon
Shines was an austere man who fol-
lowed Oystering and was of hardshell
persuasion. The deacon 'alIus made it
a pint to tell his customers that the
money which he received for listers
did not belong to him. "The good
father made the 'isters," said the dea-
con, 'and the money is his'n; Pm
only stooart.' One Sunday morning
the old fellow was tearing round from
house to house with a suspicious bit of
currency in his hand, and more than a
suspicion of rage in his face. Some
one had given him bad fifty cents,
and he wasn't gOin' to meetin' till
that ar was fixed up why Deacon
said one of his customers, whom he had
tackled about it, what's the odds?
what need you care? tisn't yours, you
know you are only a steward; it isn't
your iOss.' The deacon shifted his
shoulder, walked to the door, unship-
ped his quid, and said, 'Yaas, that's so !;
but if you think that Pm goin' to stand
by and see the Lord cheated out offifty
cents, you are mistaken. don't foster
no such .feeL6l'.'
The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-11-01

ABOUT HATING.-Hate not. 1t is
not worth while. Your life is not long
enough to make it pay to cherish ill
will or hard thoughts toward any one.
What if that man has cheated you, or
that woman has played you false ?
What if this friend has forSaken you
in your time of need, or that one having
won your entire confidence, has, con-
cluded that he prefers to treat you as
astranger? Let it all pass. What diff
erence will it make to you in a few
years, when you go hence to the "un-
discovered country?" All who ill-treat
you now will be more sorry for it then
than you, even in your grief and disap-
pointment, can be.