davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
Subiugating an Elephant.

Recently, Cincinnati paper says, circus
elephant, thirty-six years old, 10000 pounds
weight, and named Tippoo Saib, while in win
ter quarters at Connorsville, Indiana, became
unruly on account of change of his keeper,
and went to war against all mankind. He
would allow no one in his quarters, and struck
at every one who approached him with his
trunk and tusks most violently. His keeper
determined to subdue him, and the process
and result are thus described: The new keep
er, with nine assistants, had fully equipped
himself with chains and cables for tying, and
spears and pitchfOrks for subduing TippOo.
The first thing done was to fasten a brickbat
to the end of rope and throw it over the end
of the tusk chain, which latter is fastened to
one leg and one tuSk. By means Of this rope
20tun cable chain formerly used to subdue
the famous Hannibal) was slip-nOosed around
the tusk. Next, an excavation three feet deep,
was made under the sill of the house, and
while the elephants attention was attracted to
the other side of the room by pail of water
poured into his trough, the cable chain was
passed through the excavation and fastened to
heavy stakes outside. All this time the nfu-
rated monster struck all around him with ter
rible ferocity, and tugged at his chain with in
credible momentum. The next thing accomp-
lished was the snaring of his hind legs. This
was cOnsumated by the Singing of fresh ropes
aTouHu ChOSe TWO SCaCely pillars OF elephant
flesh, bone and muscle, and finally, by the
stealthy strategy of the keeper and another
man, these ropes were fastened to stumps out
side. The elephant was now sufficiently pin
iOned to allow the order, "charge pitchforks, 4"
to be given. Ten men, armed with these ugly
implements Of otfense, plunged them into the
rampaging beast, taking care, ofcourse, to avoid
his eyes or joints The tenderest spot in an
elephant is just behind the fore legs, and that
locality was prodded numerically. BY means
of hooked spear sunk in his back, Tippoo
was brought to his knees, but he surged up
again with such awful strength that he swept
his tOrmentcrs off their feet and made his
chains whistle like fddle-strings. After an
hours fighting he was brought down on his
side, but for two hours longer he tugged at his
chains with frenzied obstinacy. He pulled so
hard at times that his hind legs were straight
out behind him, and three feet off the ground
At the end of three hours the giant gave in by
trumpeting which is the elephants way of cry
ing enough. The moment this peculiar cry
was heard the battle ceased. The keeper
made TippOO get up and lie down number Of
times, and he was as obedient to the word of
command as a gentle pony. The animal was
then groomed and rubbed off with whiskey
He allowed all manner of liberties without so
inuch as faping an ear. He was subjugated
elephant
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
WHOLE NO 60

NATIONAL UNION REPUBLICAN COMMIT
TEE.-The National Union Republican Com
mittee assembled at Washington, on WGdnes
day last, and decided that the Convention to
nominate candidates for the Presidency and
Vice Presidency Of the United States, should
meet at Chicago on the Goth day of May next.
The first ballot resulted in Chicago receiving
8 votes; Cincinnati 6 indianapolis, ); Pitts
burg, |. The fifth ballot, for Chicago, u;
Cincinnati 10; and then it was made unani-
nous for Chicago. The Committee adopted
the following call:
The undersigned, constituting the National
Committee designated by the Convention held
In Baltimore on the :th Of June, 1864, do ap
point that a National Convention of the Union
Republican party be held at Chicago, Illinois,
on Wednesday, the 20th day Of May next, at
II clock NJ, for the purpose of nominating
candidates for the offices Of President and Vice
President of the United States. Each State
of the United States is authorized to be repre-
sented in said convention by the number Of
delegates equal to twice the number of Sena-
tors and Representatives to which such State
is entitled in the National Congress
We invite the cooperation of all citizens who
rejoice that our great civil war has happily
terminated in the discontinue of rebellion
who hold fast the unity and integrity of the re-
public, and maintain its paramount right to
defend to its utmost its own existence while
imperrilled by secret conspiracy or armed force !;
who are in favor of an economical administra-
tion of the public expenditures, of the complete
extirpation of the principles and policy of
slavery, and of the speedy reorganization Of
those States whose governments were des-
troyed by the rebellion, and the permanent
restoration to their proper practical relations
with the United States in accordance with the
true principles of Republican government.
MARCUS i. WARD, Chairman.
JOHN D. DEFREEs, Secretary.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

THE FIRST THING.-Old Mr. Russell was
fairly caught in his own trap He was better
known as Major Ben Russell, and being met
by his old friend Busby, he was Familiarity sa-
luted by hearty shake of the hand, and
how do you do, old Russell?'
=" Come ,now,' said Major Ben, "1'll not
take that from you-not a bit of it; you are
as old as | am this minute"
Upon my word, says Mr. Busby, "you
are my senior by at least ten years. -
9 Not at all, friend Busby; and if you
please, we will determine this question very
soon. just tell me the first thing you can
recollect,"
Well, the first thing recolect," said Mr.,
B9sby, was hearing people say there goes
old Ben. Russell" ,"
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

THE King of Denmark is in the unfortunate
position of poor man who has too many rich
relations. One of his daughters will some
day be Queen of Great Britain, (the Prince
of Wales wife) and another Empress of Rus
sia, but the poor King has not money enough
to pay gala visits to the courts of his sons-in-
law. He has recently succeeded in selling
some of the Danish colonies to Mr.. Seward,
but the money-in case the bargain should be
rattle by the United States Senate-hows
into the national treasury, and the Danes, it is
said, instead of relieving their poor King from
his petuniary embarrassments, will use the
Germany, and annexing Schleswig- Holstcin.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
In THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTA-
IPUBLIc-NO. 69.l
AN ACT reglatin the tenure Of certain civil offices:
J. w. FORNEY,
eeretary oil the Senate

AN Act regulating the tenure OF certain civil ences
Re enacted by the and House Of Representatives OF
the United America in Congress Ihat
HOLDING any civil which e has been appOntedDy
and with the advice Of the Senate ana every person
shall be appointed to any sueh once 9t SUI
cessor shall have like appointed ana dHY quar-
fed except herein otherwise provided PTovlde tne
secretaries State, Of the Treasury 0 the nA ~ t
and of the Interior the Postmaster General anu tne
General shall hold their Offices respectively Or anu
term Of the President whom they may have peen
and Tor month thereafter subject 10 reihoVA W anu
the advice and consent of the Senate. - - - .m.o. a.
sEo 2 And be il further enacted That wheh ny
pointed as aforesaid. excepting Judges Of tne yhteu ~
courts shall during recess Of the Senate oe o
dence satisfactory to the President to be guilty O
IN once or crime or for shall ecoIne
legally disqahed to perform its duties in such case anu
Other the President suspend each officer ana uessh
some suitable person to perform temporarily the DUTIES o sucn
Office until the next meeting OF the Senate, and until the
shall acted by the Senate and such desgnt
ted shall take the Oatns and the bonds required by law
be taken and given by the person duly appointed 70 al such q
in twenty days after the first day Of such meeting Senate
the Senate such with evidence
his action in the and the
designated to perform the duties Of the Sen
shall such suspension aud advise consent
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

SUCCESSFUL BEGGING. requires tact to
draw money from cold hearts and tight purses,
and many expedients of doubtful morality are
resorted to gain the desired end. The follow
ing device may be suggestive to those who are
anxious for good collections:
ga London preacher once delivered the an
niversary discourse for a charitable institution,
closing his remarks with powerful exhorta-
ton to the audience to give literally for its
support. just as the plates were being passed
round for the collection, the preacher rose and
said
60 From the sympathy have witnessed in
your countenances, and the strict attention, you
have hOnOred me with, there is only one thing
l am afraid of-that some of you may feel IN
clined to give too much. Now it Is my duty
to inform you that justice, though 1t Is moi
pleasant, should always be prior virtue to
generosity; therefore as you will be called
upon in your respective pews, | wish 1t to be
understood that no person will think of putting
anything on the plate who cannot pay hlS
II need scarcely be added that this advice
produced an overhowing collection.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
Profits.
Specialities.
MEDICAL TREATM ENT.

Calculations on extensive and reliable data. show
decreased rate Of mortality Uuder what is known as
he Homeopathic system of medicine. Therefore
make a deduction Of ten per cent from table rates
ipoa each payment Of premium by those habltuaily
Isug this mode of treatment. 1n case of medical
pracce being changed, thereafter full rates will be
,h4 ged. In order that injustice may be done 10
Ihn-e preerng other schools Of medicine, all appOr-
Of profits, under reduced rates, will be sepa
.atelV made
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

'' Amelia, for thee-yes, at thy command,
Id tear this eternal armament into thousand
tTragmentsS7Id gather the, stars one by one, as
in my trowsers pockets; I'd pluck the sun,
that oriental God of Day, that travels the blue
arch of day in such majestic spendor-I'd d
tear him from the sky and quench its bright
ehulgence in the fountain of my eternal love
for thee
Amelia" Don't Henry it would be so very
dark"
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
IPrRIIC-Nn. 3S.l

AN ACT prOvd for the election Congressional Printer
Be it by the Representatives OF
the United States of America Congress assembled That
the Senate shall elect competent person, who shall
PRACTICAL printer to take charge of and the Govern
ment Printing Office.
Sec And be further enacted That the
shall be deemed Senate and shall
Congressional Printer He shall superintend printing
and binding of the journals and such other
be ordered by each house Of Congress- and shall superinend
the execution OF all the printing and binding for the respective
departments OF the Government required by law to be
cuted at the Government Printing Office and SHALL in all
pectS governed by the laws relation the
inendent of Public Printing an the execution the printing
and binding.
SEC nd be it further enacted That from and after the
passage of this act and the election of Congressional Printer
pursuance thereof the office of Of Public Print
ing shall be abolished aud the salary of said officer shall be
the rate of four thousand dollars a year.
SEC And be further enacted, That this act shall take
effect from and after its and all inconsistent
ITS provisions are hereby repealed.
Approved February ~ 1861.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

Punch gives domestic scene called The
Tables Turned" in which a little girl and her
mamma are in the drawing room, nurse just
entering. Nurse-"Did you ring ma am p
Naughty little girl" No; rang. Take
mamTa away, please; she's very cross and
! disagreeable."
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

A gentleman from Kendall county while in
the city short time since was inveigled into
going to see the Black Crook "How did you
like it? he was asked. mot much," was
the reply. "When | got in there was aw-
fully ashamed. There was lot of women
prancing around with nothing on them but
flesh cOLored court pLnSterln
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
[PUBLIC-No. 3I.1
AN ACT concerning the rs deparment of washington City

An Act concerning the fire department of Washington City,
Be it enacted the Senate and House Representatives
the United States OF America in Congress assembled That
the right to have and all the several buildings with
their apperrenances the UnOn Franklin Columbia
and Anacosta be- and hereby granted the
city Washington in the District of Columbia said possession
and occupation continue used for the
the fire department and the pleasure of the Congress the
United Saes Provided That said and Of the
Columbia EnginehOue shall interfere with
possession and blythe Columbia Fire Company, of
the rooms used as library in said building.
Approved, February l9 1867
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
IPrB1.Ic-No. 9e.l
An Act to alter the places of holding the
Initel Stains the Rhnla Islanl

LhIIed States Tor the Rhode Island district
Be enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives
OF the United States of America Congress assembled
from and after the first day July thousand
and the circuit the United the
District OF Rhode Island shall and be held
United States court in the city OF Providence the
fifteenth day of November and the fifteenth
nua instead of the place heretofore established by law Pro-
Sded That when either OF the days last named shahta
Sunday the session of said then held
commence on the Monday following.
SEQ And be it further enacted That all indictments
iomaon suits or actions and proceedings Of every kind
whether OF civil criminal nature pending in the said circuit
court the first day of July Domn eighteen hundred
and sXtyx, shall thereafter have day in and pro-
ceeded n heard tried and determined the
place herein appointed for holding the said the
manner and with the effect the said court had been
law,
SEC And be it further enacted That all writs suits
% orecognzanceS other proceedings which shall
De instituted served commenced taken to the said
have been holden heretofore directed by law shall
able to, entered heard tried and have
court to be holden at the time and place by this act directed
the might ought to have
the said court been holden at the times and places heretofore
directed by law.
Approved, February 2l, 1867.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

A red nosed gentleman asked a wit whether
he believed in spirits 'Ay, sir, replied he;
looking him full in the face, Il see too much
evidence before me to doubt that
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

A bill posted on the walls of country vii.
lage announces that "a lecture will be delyered
in the open air, and a collection made At the
door to defray expenses. y ~
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

WHAT is the difference between Noah's Arb
and Joan of Arc? One was made of wood
the other was maid of Orleans.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

"Why, Doctor" said a sick lady, "you are
giving me the same medicine that you are CIV
ing my husband. "Why is that?" IAN
right, said the doctor, what is sauce for the
goose is sauce for the gander.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

Who is wiseP He that is teachable. Who
Is mlghtyI He that conquers himself Who
Is rich he that is contented. Who Is hon
oredE de that honoreth others,
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

"PA, do storms ever make malt LIQUORS ?"
No, chill why do you ask ?" " Because 7
heard ma tell Jane to bring in the clothes. for
storm was brewing" '0'
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

WHAT AMERICAN GIRLS SAY ABOUT KISS
ING.-The varied emotions excited by young
ladies in leading cities along the line from
Boston to st. Louis, as kisses are caught or
stolen from their sweet lips, are expressed in
something like the following manner:
A Boston girl says with an assumption of
Indignation -" Sir, declare such liberty as
that is beyond all bounds of prOpriety and
gentlemanly manners. NJ" she is stopped
by another which isn't resisted very badly.
The New York girl says Indeed, Mr..
Brown, your conduct is a little familiar, if not
ardent I've half mind to ask what you take
me for" The reply of Brown is that he takes
her for something nice and sweet, and sharp,
smacking ensues. The Buffalo girl says, with
marked positiveness of manner, but with
equally marked inSncerity: "Wrctch, thief,
put that right back; wouldn't lose it for the
world" She not only don't lose it, but gets
as she wants. double principle and interest.
The Philadelphia girl says: $50, you think
that's dreadful smart; you would INT have done
it if had been looking no indeed; y but she
makes it point not to look. The Baltimore
girl says Repeat the Insult if you dare, sir, y
and exposes her face that it may be done
easily and often The Washington girl re-
marks: "You've been and gone and done it,
have you; now cipher out how much better
you feel and calculate when you'll get another
chance" The Chicago girl says: "Confound
your impudence, do you take me for a New
Yorker? I'd have you know there is spice
of danger in that little matter" The only
danger she apprehends is that you won't cut
and come again The Cincinnati girls says
6 Did you ever, no | never-you men are per-
feet monsters" Affects tears and indignation,
but is assuaged by a duplication of the old
dose. The Louisville girl says: You've done
it sure and we'll. Ifthere are any more'of that
sort, help yourself. If you can stand it, |
can." The Detroit Girl says: "Mien Jeru-
salum, what a naughty, funny man. BETTER
look out how you take one, two, four more,
before mil, mine goot mother moth comes The St,
nonsence you oughter be ashamed of your.
SELF You can't do it again" She exposes
her face, and it is done again several times.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
No. s9.I

Az ACT to amend entitled An concerning the
department of Washington City approved February eigh-
teen. eighteen hundred and sixty
BE enacted by the Representatives
the United States of America in Congress assembled That
much of the act entitled An act concerning the fire department
of Washington city approved February eighteen eighteen
hundred and sXtseven provides fer the and occupation
of the Union egnehouse by the city ofWashngtOn hereby
repealed.
Approved, March 2 1867.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
OFFICIAL.

LAWS OF THE UNITED STATES.
Passed at the First Session of the Thirty Ninth Con-
greSS.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

THE ocean speaks eloquently and forever"
says Beecher. Yes, retorts Prentice, ''and
there is no use in telling it to dry up.'
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

THE Democratic papers are growing Justify
over what they call victory in the Pittsburgh
charter election. We do not see it in that
light. True, the regular Republican candi-
date was defeated, but his competitor was not
the nominee of the Democratic party They
had no candidate. There was a large party of
working men in the field, who put up Mr..
Backmore for Mayor without reference to his
political views; the Democrats generally, and
a good many Republicans, supported him-ths
Republicans on the labor question, and the
Democrats for the lack of any nominee of their
own. Hence his success. But the hurrah
over the result as Democratic victory is the
coolest sort of assumption. In the Select
Council the Republicans have "A Democrats,
.; Labor Reform | in the Common Council,
Republicans, fl Democrats ,, and one tie
With sicty. fce members in the City Councils
where the Democracy have only Jour We judge
that the Republican party will manage to out
live the effects Of the great Democratic
victory in Pittsburgh.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
Periodicals.

Ptttnan1's Monthh. The first number of the
new series of this magazine is published, and it
brings with it refreshing recollection of the
years of its former life. The number opens
with note from Chas. F. Briggs and letter
from G. w. Curtis, connecting the old and new
series Then following Thirteen years of the
Nation,' by V. B. Denslow poem by the
author of Nothing to Wear; - " Jewels of
the Deep--Corals, by Prof. Schele de We're
:" Too True A story Of Today; Life in
Great Ta Cltles Dickens Second s "a VISIT, W tn
tributors. Among those on file, or in prepa-
ration, are sketch of Fitz Green Halleck, by
f. A. Duyckinck; Fenimore Cooper's Diary,
edited by his daughter; A series of Papers, by
Bayard Taylor articles by Edwin NJ Stanton,
j. LOthrop Motley, Geo. 2. Marsh, and others.
Peterson's magazine. January number
of this excellent Ladies' Magazine is upon our
table. The embellishments are The Anxious
Mother" double page colored fashion plate,
and the " Beauty of the Season, all superb
steel engravings-and numerous wood cuts IL
Illustrative of the latest styles of ladies' dresses,
&c. Among the literary contents we notice
the first chapters of 6 Bride of the Prairie, .
by Mrs. Ann S. Stephens; Guilty or not
Guilty" by Amanda NJ: Douglas, together
with Poetry, Sketches, and other reading mat
ter of an entertaining and instructive nature
Terms 81 year. Address Charles j. Peter
son, No 306 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia.
Cooley for Januaty-The best number of
the Lady'S Magazine we have ever seen. The
two steel plates are very fine, one of them con-
tains three distinct pictures. The tinted cut
speciality of Cooley Sis sweetly pretty; and
the inimitable fashion plate. is beyond all
praise. But the great feature of this number
is Godey's extension plate Ofthe latest fashions,
two feet long, printed on both sides, making
four feet--a new thing The reading matter
is good. Terms SO year. Address L. A.
Cooley. Philadelphia.
The Old FFamklin Alnaadc-We have re-
ceived the Old Franklin Almanac for 1868,
published by A. Winch, No. sos Chestnut st.
Philadelphia. The Almanac contains, exclu
sive of the actual astronomical calculations,
great variety of statistics, chronological tables
and useful matter, which is claimed to have
never before been introduced into work o.
this kind. Price 20 cents.
LGndreth'S Rural Register and Almdndc
for lS6S.-We have received a copy of thi,
valuable annual publication for gratuitouS dis
tribution. Every Farmer and Gardener should
have one. To be had of David Landreth and
Son, Nos 2l and % South 9th street, Phila
the great Agricultural Warehouse and Seed
Emporium.
The Weather. Wag's Alnlenck We have re-
ceived from the same publisher an Almanac
headed as above, full of wit and humor.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18

WHAT'S TO BEGUN OF ME?-A touching
instance of connubial affection and devotion
occurred not long since in New Hampshire.
An aged couple who during a half a century
of married life had wranged and quarreled
with each other, were in all probability soon
to be separated. The old husband was taken
sick, and was believed to be near his end.
The old spouse came to his bedside, and after
carefully examining and taking stock of his
condition, exclaimed:
"Wy daddy, your feet are cold, and your
hands are cold, and your nose is cold +"
"Wa'al letum be cold ~
"Wy daddy, you re goin' to die ="
"Wa'al, | guess know wOt I'm bout"
"Wy, daddy, watts to becum of me if you
die 2"
Il dunno, and don't care! Wat want to
know is, ,cGt'S to becum of me ?"
At this stage of the Coloquy our reporter
judged thai the correct and delicate thing for
him to do would be to retire. He did.
Smyrna times., 1867-12-18
ToHN IT. DAVIS,

Men and Boys Clothing cut and made in the most
fashionable manner, and Perfect Fits Iaaran'eeo'
Oetaber 18th, 1887.