Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1867-08-29
.SA WE'D BY A MIRACLE.

sadly copperhead sheet, thinking of
what it deserves In the other world,
has the grace to admit that it will be
"a darn'd tight squeeze" for its
friends if it should escape, and mar
rates the following:
Question to he debated at the next
meeting of the e.rclusipes of the Loyal
League: "Can man dying in the
Democratic faith with all the per
quisites ola Christian, go to heaven?"
There are very large number of
people who don't believe he can.
The debate will be an animated one,
although, like the handle of a jng, all
on one side Who will take the
aflirmativeY
Why, we will, and sustain it by re-
lating a Boston story, which is
precisely in point. Many years
since there lived in the not over
classic neighborhood of Dock Square
an old fellow who was called by the
boys General Il. He kept
"gin mill'' and "prop shop" and
was. altogether, what is konwn as
hard case. One morning he address
ed n crowd Of loungers thus:
Boys, l had queer dream last
night-a most 'stronary dream
We'll, General, what was it?
What dill you dream?"
"Well. boys | dreamed | died"
mo! did you? Well" said all the
crowd in Il breath, Where did you
GO TOP
"Went to Heaven
80, come now, General, that is a
little too much, you know; couldn't
be, you know"
"Fact, boys, for all that went
to Heaven"
.'But how did you get in, Gene
RAIL-"
"Well, that's the queer part on it,
and I'll tell you how.
You see, when | got over there, /
made my way up to gate and knock
ed, and asked what place that was,
and somebody looked over the wall
and asked me what l wanted, and /
said wanted, to come inside
Then he said he was Saint Peter, and
that was the gate Of Heaven, and /
told him that was just where L want
ed to get to. He asked me some
questions, and was just goin. to let
me in, when, just my tarnal luck,
along come the devil, and he hollered
out to Peter that l belonged to him,
and hadn't any business inside. OF
course l couldn't say nothing. but
felt awful scary. Well right away,
Peter he come outside, and says he:
Satan what claim have you got on
that soul?' Why says the devil, he
is my man; he's been selling rum
and shaking props down in Boston
more than twenty years Il admit |
that says Peter, but didn't he al
ways sell good liquors?' We'll, yes,
I'm bound to admit he did, said
Satan. Did he ever cheat at prop
shaking" Not that l can prove
We'll, then says the saint, you can't |
have him on that | begun to feel |
better, boys, when the devil says he,
But this fellow soldru on Sundays
Peter looked sharp at me, and asked
if that was so. daren't lie. so l said,
Yes, but l always paid the largest |
of any man in the parish |
to the minister's salary We'll,
says Peter to Satan, that alters the
case again, you see With that
the devil got little riled, and says
he, Il can't bother here all day about
him-suppose we rattle for him.
Agreed, says Peter, and they threw
me down and sot on me, and Satan
got the first throw, and he threw three
skies! Oh, didn't / feel myself a
conner when felt him wriggle his
tail; for he ;hOught and | knew that
three skies coulu't be beat, and says
he, Peter, I've got him. Hold on,
says he" Il haven't had my throw
yet And he tok the box, and
shook and shook, although /
couldn't see the use on it. and as I'm
Twin sinner yet he threw two skies
and screen! The devil jumped up
quick, and putting off, says he, Pc
ter, it amt no sort ofuse-ifyou are
going to come them miracles on me.
you can have him. so you see,
boys, / DID get in, but it took mira
Gle to do it,