Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1867-01-29


not in practice. Contracting debts without the
| intention of paying them is mean economy
it is robbing another in order that you may live.
l will tell you a story about a goblin tailor
which will somewhat illustrate the position
have taken.
Il had a friend once-he was the very essence
Of fashion, the very ne plus ultra of the exquis-
ite, and, with all, blood of the first water
His honest father had boarded pretty penny
by mending the soles of the tories during the
revolutionary war, when at his last, contriyed
to make both ends meet SO neatly, that his all
was something handsome to his STRIPPING son
who, ON the old mans death, was forthwith
sent by his careful guardian to college, that he
of fortune. Ned Gaylove went through college
about as easy as camel goes through the eye
of needle, and, when he returned home, mas
ter of himself, he became master of his fortune.
Then commenced career of fun and frolic-
midnight sprees, regular rows, upsetting of
Watchmen, ct cetera, were all the go for awhile,
and money flew as if he had been a second
Midas. But the little winged god, who is ever
on the watch for victims worthy of his unerring
shaft, soon pierced the heart of my hero, who
had unfortunately encountered two of the pret-
tlest sparklers that ever twinkled in the fore
head of a well finished coquette. The object
belle of the city and, alas for him he thought
he had made a conquest worthy of himself
She smiled upon him-there was life and light
in that smile; he knelt at her feet-she raised
him, and sweetly bade him hope. Oh, the
more than earthly bliss of that moment! All
the most fashionable tailors in the city were
called upon to espouse his cause; stays, hips,
calves and whiskers, were all called in requisi-
ton, and Ned became the Beau Brummel of
the age. The tie ofhis cravat, whether in front
or under his right or left ear, would be the sig
nal for a change in the fashion; the twirEng of
his cane, or the exquisite grace with which he
out of their wits; and, l have even heard it
said that rival Corinthian once strangled him
self to death, because he could not find out the
digit Ned used when he had recourse to his
tdbdtiere.
sNed's supremacy in the fashionable world
pleased his princess much, yet, she continued
to feed him on hopes, repast which no man
can tatten on. His money gave out and his
creditors began to bore him. At length the
fair one ceased to smile and the poor fellow
wasted away to mere skeeton day after day
he might be seen frequenting lonesome places
and holding communion with the spirit of soli-
tude. What change! his dress was sloven
his gait lazy and careless, and his whole appear
ance betokened-a broken heart At length
he disappeared altogether; every person had a
others that he had committed suicide and one,
most likely, said he had gone to California to
revive his fortunes in the gold diggings
s'Year after year rolled past, and | had almost
forgotten that such person as Ned Gaylove
ever existed, when, one night at a late hour, as
[ was hurrying towards my house, saw sol
itary being leaning against a lamp post, with
his arms folded and his eyes fixed upon the 81
lent moon as she waded through trackless space
/ gazed upon the pale face of the lonely astron-
omer it was Ned-but, alas, how changed i
He knew me instantly. and seizing my hand
with convulsive grasp, dragged me after him
without utterlng word. We soon came to a
solitary mansion in by-street, and after mount
ing several :flight, Of steps, reached garret
furnished with a bed, table and two stools On
the table stood dimly burning taper and a
bundle of papers, which, from slight glance,
which [ afterwards stole at them, turned out to
be unreceipted bills.
g" BE seated said he, after moment S
pause. Alas my friend, you see before you
a miserable man. | am not what [ was-the
world is too narrow for me, it has no solitude
it's waters will not queneh the eternal fire that
is gnawing upon my heart. O., that horrible
phantom! will it never quit my side? Avaunt,
dread being of another world !! He shuddered
while he gazed ixedly upon the vacant air !;
but, after a while he seated himself and became
more composed.
"sSpeak not, continued he, seeing that [ was
about opening my lips, L will tell you all. 1t
is not the loss Of the tickle fair that has driven
me to this state of live-long wretchedness
world hath many brighter star than she. You
You we'll know that when my creditors impor
tuned me with their bills, in order to rid myself
of the eternal plaques, took the benefit of the
bankrupt law. There was one among them, an
honest tailor, who had credited me to large
amount, and his whole prosperity rested on my
paying the bill Wretch that [ was [ did
not-he was ruined-his family brought to mis-
ery-and he died broken-hearted O, that I
could roll this mountain of despair from my
soul On the night of his death, | had retired
calmly to rest; nothing troubled me then save
the cruelty of Charlotte. 1t was about twelve
o clock, that dread hour when restless spirits
love to wander forth, when voice thundered
in my ear Pay me my bill and, opening my
eyes, I beheld the ghost of the dead tailor be-
fore me; his lack-lustre eyes we're fixed upon
my face, and he held dreadful pair Of shears
in his hand arose from my bed with yell
of horror-I fed, but the feshless being fol-
lowed me. Isought the halls of the gay; the
notes of the melodious viol and flute were
echoed by the loud laug gh of merriment-th
splendid lights of the rooms we're only rivelled
by the sparkling eyes of the lovelest and meek
est, and yet, the herrid thing was there. |
flew to the woods--I wood the waters when
the melancholy calm of Summers eve was
upon them-I stood amid the wild tumult of
the Storm and laughed at the fires that flick
cred around me-still the phantom was by my
side. [ thought to shun it by leaving my ma
tive land-I crossed the deep seal shouted
amid the host that rallied around the flag of
Liberty in Hungary-the roar of the wide
mouthed artillery was music to mel trampled
on the dying and the Dead and laughed over
the ruins of cities; yet, the grim spectre was
at my side, ever and anon shrieking in my
ears-'Pay me my bill 7 Go where [ will
asleep-awake, the horrid thing still haunts
me- [ see it now; it opens its grim jaws, and
laughs in mockery at my grief Do you not
hear it shouting me my bill p''
[ left the poor wretch in company with his
familiar, and sought my home thanking my
stars that all my tailors' bills were settled [
shortly afterwards heard that poor Ned Gay
love had committed suicide.
BY swallowing a red-hot goose?" asked
Duncan.
Exactly SO, - answered Smilax; San awful
warning to you youngsters who do not square
up accounts with your tailors. Gentlemen take
heed.
@The Major appears to be not at all singular in
his theory. 1t is recorded in the Boston Medical
journal that some of the most eminent physiolo-
gists of Germany and France are now pertina-
ciously arguing the very curious question as to
,atn noro fpalSa off hoaH iC off Tn