The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1867-03-27
MRS. CRUDLES CURTAIN LECTURES.
Continued from our last issue.
THE THLRTYFOURTH LECTURE.


doing proves it, Some people won't make
will, because they think they must die
directly afterwards. Now, you're above that
love, ar'n't you Nonsense; you know very
well what mean. | know your wills made
for Scratcherly told me so. What You don't
6elieUe Il? Well, Pm sure That's pretty
thing for a man to say to his wife. l know
he's too much a man of business to talk; but
suppose there's way of telling things with
out speaking them. And when | put the
question to him, lawyer as he is, he hadn't
the face to deny it.
''To be sure, it can be of no consequence to
me whether your will is made or not. l shall
not be alive, Mr.. Caudle to want anything: |
shall be provided for long time before your
Wills of any use. No, Mr.. Caudle l sha'n't
survive you and-though a Woman's wrong
to let her affection for a man be known, for
then she's always taken advantage of-though
] know it's foolish and weak to say so, still |
don't want to survive you. How should
No, no don't say that: Pm not good for a
hundred sha'n't see you out, and another
husband too. What a gross idea Caudle!
To imagine I'd ever think of marrying again.
No-never What That's ,ohat zoe all say2
Not at ALL quite the reverse. To me the very
idea of such thing is horrible, and always
was. Yes, l know very well that some do
marry again,-but what they're made of, Pm
sure | can't tell.-Ughl
"There are men, l know, who leave their
property in such a way that their widows, to
hold it, must keep widows. Now if there is
anything in the world that is mean and small,
ii is that. Don't you think so, too Caudle
Why don't you speak, love That's so like
you l never want little quiet, rational
talk, but you want to go to sleep. But you
never were like any other man What
How do / knoW There now-that's so like
your aggravatng way. never open my lips
upon subject but you try to put me off. Fve
no doubt when Miss Prettyman speaks, you
can answer her properly enough. There you
are again Upon my life, it IS odd; but l
never can in the most innocent way mention
that PERSONS name that WIN can't leave
her alone Pm sure with all my heart
Who wants to talk about her ? don't; only
you always will say something that's certain
to bring up her name.
"What was l saying Caudle Oh, about
the way some men bind their widows. To my
mind, there is nothing so little. When a man
forbds his wife to marry again without losing
what he leaves-its what l call selfshness
after death. Mean to a degree It's like
taking his wife into the grave with him. Eh?
You neUer rant to do that? No, Pm sure of
that, love; you're not the man to tie woman
up in that manner A man who'd do that,
would have his widow burnt with him, if he
could-iust as those monsters, that call them
selves men, do in the Indies.
'However, it's no matter to me, you've
made your will; but it may be to your second
wife. What? 1 shall ReCer gice you chance?
Ha you don't know my constitution after
all, Caudle Pm not at all the woman l
was. ! say nothing about 'em but very often
you don't know my feelings. And as we're on
the subject, dearest, have only one favor to
ask. When you marry again-now it's no
use your saying that After the comforts
you've known of marriage-what are you
signing at, dear ?-after the comforts, you must
marry again.-Now don't forswear yourself in
that violent way, taking an oath that you
know you must break-you couldn't help it,
Pm sure of it; and / know you better than
YOU know yourself. Well, all / ask is, love,
because it's only for your sake. and it would
make no difference to me then-how should
it?-but all l ask is, don't marry Miss Pret
There there! I've done; l won't say
another word about it; but all | ask is, don't.
After the way you've been thought of, and
after the comforts you've been used to,
Caudle she won't be the wife for you. Of
course, | could then have no interest in the
matter-you might marry the Queen of Eng
\ land, for what it would be to me then-Im
only anxious about you. Mind, Caudle, Pm
not saying anything against her; not at all;
but there's tlightiness in her manner dare
say poor thing, she means no harm, and it
4 may be, as the saying is, only her manner
after all--still, there IS a lightness about her
that after what you've been used to, would
make you very wretched. Now, if | may
boast of anything, Caudle, it is my propriety
of manner the whole of my life. l know that
wives who're very particular ar'n't thought as
well of as those who're not-still, it's next to
nothing to be virtuous, if people don't seem
So And virtue, Caudle--no, Pm not going to
preach about virtue, for l never do. Mo- and
] don't 60 about with my virtue, like child
with a drum, making all sorts of noises with
it. But l know your principles. | shall
never forget what once heard you say to
Prettyman: and it's no excuse that you'd
taken so much wine you didn't know what
you were saying at the time; for wine brings
out mems wickedness, Just as fire brings out
spots of grease What did you sag? Why
you said this:-'Virtue's a beautiful thing in
women, when they don't make so much noise
about it, but there's some women who think
virtue was given 'em, as claws were given tt
cats'-yes, cats was the word-'to do nothing
but scratch with That's what you said
You don't recollect a syllable oft? No, that
it; when you're in that dreadful state you re
collect nothing; but it's good thing do.
''But we won't talk ofthat, love-that's all
over. l dare say you meant nothing. Bu
Pm glad YOU agree with me that the maj
who'd tie up his widow, not to marry again
is a mean man. 1t makes me happy tina
you've that confidence in me to say that
You neyer said Il? That's nothing to do witt
it-you've Just as good as said it. No: whe
man leaves all his property to his wife
without binding her hands from marrym
again, he shows what dependence he ha
upon her love. He proves to all the Worl
what wife she's been to him; and how ate
his death he knows she'll grieve for hin
And then of course, a second marriage neve