The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1867-11-13
a HardsheIl Sermon.

From the Brandon Missssippi) Republican
The following sermon lately delivered in this
State by veritabe hardshe and taken down YER
batim by skillful stenographer who has kindly fur
nished US with his notes.-the only copy extant:
"And ar'ea they riz up early IN the morlia, behold
they acas all dead co,pusses"
My Friens and Hearers-I will preach onto you this
day-wn and weather permittn-frum the thirty
sevingth chapter Isai-y, thirty verse An
the desroyin angel smote in the camp the Syreeni
mans hundred and foscore an five thousing men-ah
Am uhen they rig up early IN the mormin, behold they
all dead co1pstsses."
An thus it is my unconverted frens an hearers, that
the destroyn angel stalks abroad with his meat-axe,
ready to to the boneyard befo we kin set down
to breaktust-ah. An it is sed my friens that roses
are red and volets bueah, but its tryin
honeyfuggle roun the angi Gabrl when he toots his
horn fur yu to tuck yo tails an git under drt-ah.
" an arhen they rsz up early IN tile naornin, behold
they acas all dead corpusses."
My wretched brethring and sistring, es I was
ridin along the road one day, seed sttin upon
the top bis fence, with doublebarre shotgun on
his lapah sweatn an fannin himself with u
node straw hat an cussin Nv the furthe july an
North Ameriky, the Constitution an the Supreme
Court, an the brduv liberty, and the President the
United States ah an when hearn that man eussin
an seen that big shotgun thinks to myself, in the
words the tex-ah:
"An mhen they riz up early IN the morntn, behold
they acas all dead corpasses.n
An tole ole Roam to wo an ses l, 'sMy ungodly
ren eff yu in that air way yu will forever and
eternally runate yo immortal souah, never git a
nibble when WI go fshin-ah 4" ses he, "Yu go to
hell, yu damd ole misshapen, misbegotten mistake
creationah eft yu had to git the grass out cot
ting crap with free nggers, yud git upon stump
yoself out Nv 70 damd ole yaler hide aud go
hell fur yo heath-ah" An ses |, "My erin fren, it
cuts me to the marrer to see yu struggln i'll the bond
ing Nv sn-ah" An ses he, "My punkin-faced Gus
TONER eff yu kin cline that tall red oak thar an see
anything in this here miserable Ian but bondg an
crabgrass, yu kin take my ole hat for henness. an"
An ses /, "My hard swearin frien, aeard yu will
register 70 in the book of eternal liteah
Aud ses he went to town last Mondy to register and
couldn't git sight Nv the book for the dam greasy
niggersah" "Oh, mistaken human" ses l. C | trim
bic fur 70 fuur fur yu air the road leading
perdton-ah." An ses he, " Yu air dam ole liar fur
am the road leading to Bentonah.' | heayed a
groan, my hearers, ses l:
"Am mhem they riz up early the morni,e, behold
they all dead corpusses"
An ses he, Let EN- riz and be damd TO EN- allah"
"Oh my suiferin teller creeur," l. eff yu would
but sue fur grace w might cum to ne that heavenly
quire an be manc pated trum the snackles sn-ahn
An he cooked Nv his gun ses he, 81 had twentysix
likely niggers mancipated on my hans, an eff yu open
20 jaw bout Emancipation to me agin I'll make buzzard
vittles out 70 damd ole swiveed up carkas befo
hell cOulu cripple Nv Snatan MY constant frienS
an hearers, when seed that wicked man a cockn Nv
his gunah, begun to feel exceeding jubous, the
words Nv the tex smote upon my ear-ah:
"An cden heyria mp early IN tie morning, behold
they aoas all dead corpusses."
But, my christian hearers, felt called upon to try
my han more time on this opjurit manah;
I, "My blasphemous frien, you air continually and
forever dsmd-ah, ef yu don't mmejltly git down ofen
that air tence-ah, 60 to some sequestered spot
pray for 20 souls redemption-ah" An he jumped
down oen the fence sho nuf, but he didn't go to no
sequestered spot-ah; but, unconscious hearers, he
stuck that big ole doublebarrel shotgun close up to
my reverend headah an ses he, "rve hearn seques-
terer the next thing to confedcater, eff that's
yo business in this here settlement, had better be-
gin to grow nifty dam small and butully essah." !" An,
my hearers, it looked to eff drove mules
could trotted down the barrels that air ole shot
gunah, I put spurs to ole Roam, an galluped
through the wilderness fur fo twenty hours-ah
thinks l. my hearers, eff that air man don't pull up
soon, he'll git to the eend Nv his ropeah
"Ar, ohen they riz up early in the moymin, behold
they Das all dead corpmsses."
An sho nutf my patient hearers in about three days
that prottanated man was TUX up by the freedman's
buro and tried by military commission an hung fur
killing a nigger-ah an, my snen riens and hearers,
when | seed him stanin on the great immensity nv
space an kckn at the foth district, to myself
in the languig of the inspired hmester-ah
zone more sinner is dead an gone
silver spade to dig his grave,
A golden chain to let him down,
5ugle horn to blow him -ah"
oh. mhen they riz up early IN the mornin, behold
they all deadcorpusses."