The Fremont weekly journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County, Ohio) 1867-1877, 1867-12-20
A Little Nonsense

1t is good thing to have utility and
beauty combined, as the wssher-woman
said when she used her thirteen child
ren for clothes-piPs-r seTs 81 sss-r.
1t is confidently reported in diplomat
ic circles that Victor Hugo, when asked
if he could tell the origin of the Bona
parte family, replied, "of Cors-i-can. !"
Chow are the n.itey, fallen. as the
grocer said when the shelf containing
the cheeses broke, and the pieces went
rolling over the floor. gsl hfs Liar73
The Hamilton Times does not CON
slider Weston's pedestrianism anything
remarkable, since it has learned that he
was once collector for q newspaper es7
tablishment.
A "tinp wedding was lately observ-
ed in Gloucester after rather unusual
manner. The wife eloped with young
fellow, taking with her all the "tin I"
she had saved in ten years. The dis
covery of her absence closed the festiyi-
ties. b.. ,,o- -
A Bavarian journal announces that,
with view of counteracting the infu-
ence of the unreliable reports that are
ahoat it will hereafter publish the most
notable falsities the under the head Of
"a bulletin of lies.'
i't'l ,-sssa q y D. i7-' lsrrsd bus sgsis
1H Coon, ,ADyIcE,-The Berkshire Gour-
ief sensible advises its correspondents,
as follows: DoN'T-People WHO send
us communications" for publication ARE
requested" not to ''quote" and under
score so MUcH. THIS is about the way
A good deal of "matter" would LOOK
if we 'tpra,ted" it as WRITTEN
A man advertised for a wife, and re-
quested each candidate to enclose her
carte de visite. "A spirited young lady
wrote to the advertiser in the following
terms: "Sir,' | do not enclose my
carte, for, though there is some authori-
ity for putting a cart before horse, /
know of none for putting one before an
ass" s4s u.is.'s sl'ii.
The following memorandum was
picked up by one of the editorial force
of the New York Express: skeleton
skirt for wife; Godfrey's cordial for ba-
by; No. 9 shoes for Matilda; nursing
bottle No. 2; gallon of whiskey;
pink saucers and powder for Miss Jones;
one Testament; borrowed of Smith SI2;
send for bread and beefsteak at l2 Al. !;
meet Julia at 5 P. NJ" st--.--f 10
The editor of Jacksonville Oily Jour
nal states that he has on his hooks two
thousand columns of ''Editorial Rocky
Mountain Excursion" correspondence,
and that does not comprise over two
thirds of what has been printed. He
might have truthfully added, that the
whole batch, as reading matter, was
as entertaining as Patent Office Re-
port s'id7 ~ ~ a
The latest French idea is to print
newspapers in chocolate ink on pie
crust. After the news is read it is then
eaten. 1t is easy to imagine the letters
that will be received by the editors of
this novel periodical: "DEAR SIR:
Your news is fresh, your politics are
sound, your stories are interesting; but
| would prefer that the pie-crust were
better done. In fact, l am now suffer-
ing from an attack of indigestion caus-
ed by your last number being slack
baked" "DEAR SIR: 1 renew my cub
scription for three months. l think
your gazette would be improved by a
little free thought and annise-seed to
enliven the mind and stomach. ."-EVe-
tting Nail. aao zssis