North Branch democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Pa.) 1854-1867, 1867-06-19
CORRY OLANUS ON RUSSIAN AMER
ICAs


been unavailing.
have some thoughts of leaving Brook
lyn and going where talent is recognized.
The purchase of Russian America opens
new field of enterprise.
A splendid field for ice companies and
skating pond proprietors.
The climate they say is pleasant after
you get used to it.
There are none Of the sudden changes of
temperature you experience here.
It freezes steady the year round.
II never rains there snow is the near
est approach to it they ever experience.
Winter usually sets in about the first of
November, and lasts till the middle of the
next November.
They have short summer about the
first of August.
Which lasts about twenty minutes,
The people avail themselves of the op-
portunity to lay in their winter supplies.
The population is mixed descent, like
that of the Eastern States
The principal races are Esquimaux, Seals
Russians, Bears and Walruses.
The chief productions of the country, ARE
ice, furs, ice, aurora borealises, icebergs,
whales, whale-oil aud ice.
The ice-crop is the largest il. the United
States.
A statistician in the State Department
has computed that tax Of half cent q
pound on all the ice produced in this new
territory would pay off the national debt
10 six months, with balance sufficient to
pay the salary of the Secretary of State.
To say nothing of the income tax that
might be collected from the Esquimaux.
The peculiar wants of the people would
open a new market for the products of
American industry.
The principal diet of the Russians is
fried candles.
Since the introduction of kerosene oil,
the candle trade has declined and it is moth
ing like what it was when Garibaldi made
long skies at Staten Island.
The annexation to the States of so large
canddle consuming population would
create revival in the trade.
But the political advantages are still
much greater.
What LOT of new offices will be crea-
ted.
Collectors, Assessors, Postmasters, and
all such.
The Esquimaux are not much addicted
10 correspondence but it wouldn't be the
fault of the postmasters ifthey had nothing
to do.
The territory would soon want to be-
come a State, and if its sentiments at all
correspond with the latitude, it would be
sufficiently Northern in politics to insure
prompt admission to the Union.
There is suspicion that, owing to their
very northern situation, the popular ideas
of the population might run to an extreme
that would out-radicsl the Radicals.
Their views on the suffrage question
might out Beecher Beecher.
Suppose, for instance, they insisted upon
extending the franchise, not only to the
human population of all the races, ages
and sexes, but give the vote to seas and
walruses. .
Barnum's learned seal might be one OF
the first Senators sent to Washington.
] think Of going out to the territory to
run for Congress.
A fellow could .,retire.'on the proceeds of
one term.
The amount of mileage Of member OF
Congress from the North Pole to Washing
ton, at the present rates, would amount to
$149,892,l4.
A man could afford to 60 through a
great variety of temperature at this rate.
The new territory has not been named
yet, and Secretary Seward is open for pro-
posals on the subject.
Expecting to represent the country Of
fcially, also feel interested.
We would like to have something origi-
nal and expressive.
Johnsonia had been suggested, but A. j.
is rather played out, and the name wouldn't
60 down. ................ 49,.
Being of Russian extraction, q name
with a Muscovite flavor would be appro-
pirate. 49,.
All Russian names end with off CT ski.
This has divided public opinion into two
porties, the "off" and skis" .
belong to the "skis." Mr.. friend
O'Pake, who belongs to the same party,
has suggested the appropriate name Of
"Co-iolanuski." ........ ......
Modesty forbids my expatiating on the
euphony and elegance of this name. t
"Frobjinski" sounds well, but his Indians
don't belong to the Esquimaux tribe. aa
"Highandryski" would be very appro-
pirate. .u ... 4,
This name was suggested BY report
that Joe Reeve was going out to the terri
tory to try and induce the Esquimaux to
adopt the paid fire department system.
The ,'oris" have a great many names.
"Damlongwayoa" is Russian, peculiar
and expressive.
"Eversofarof" is not so emphatic.
Jumpingoff'' is not bad for the extremi-
ty of creation.
The subject of names opens wide field
p Ill 1nn-n Too