The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1867-12-19


chatting briskly upon the numerous
topics Of the day, she suddenly caught
his hand, and looking snilingly into
his face, asked, " Do you know why
I cannot ge5 religion?' No, my
dear, [ do not = 1t is because |
love the devilr'
Some wag in England hit off the
salvage mania there, few years ago,
by issuing a prospectus for a joint
stock company to drain the Red Sea,
to recover the valuables the Egyptians
lost when Pharaoh and his host were
overwhelmed by the waters in their
pursuit of the children of Israel.
PAPER. = The paper having the
largest circulation-the paper of to-
bacco.
Paper for the "roughs - sand
paper.
Paper containing many fpe points
the paper Of needles.
The paper that is full of rows-the
paper Of pins.
Papers illustrated with cuts-edi-
torial exchanges.
Drawing paper-dentist's bills.
4 paper that .takes-a Sheriff's
warrant.
Ruled paper-the French press.
MADAM, at what price per yard
do you sell this broadcloth?' asked
VIM. Pennington of fair miss.
Five dollars, sir. y
You're little dear"
Yes replied the blushing maid
en-, so all the young men tell me-"
WHY, asked Prentice, don't the
planets cut off the comets tail when
it passes among them? They all have
axes.
A FLIRT is like the dipper of the
public pump, which all may drink at,
but none carry away.
The damsel who is accused of
breaking a young mans heart, has
been bound over in the bonds of mat
rimony to keep the pieces.
A good brother in one of the rural
districts thought that he had call to
preach. Being an Indifferent reader,
| he got friend to read the scriptures.
A chapter on one occasion was the
22nd Genesis, which contains the
verse: These eight did Micah bear
to Nabor, Abraham's brother" On
this the preacher held forth as fol-
lows: Brethren and sisters, let us
consider our blessings. Morning and
evening our wives and daughters milk
our cows, and thus supply our wants
But in the days of good old Abraham,
as you have just heard, it took eight
to milk a bear, and they did not get
much at that"
The latest style of bonnet has
turned up at Richmond, Indiana. Il
is described as consisting of two
straws tied together with a blue rib
bon, on the top of the head, and red
tassels suspended at each of the four
ends of the straws." Price nineteen
dollars.
There is a commercial gentleman
who is unusually scrupulous in re-
gard to having his door plate polished
every morning, being determined to
leave an untarnished name behind
him when he goes to the counting
room.
The New York Neoos tells the fol
lowing good one" on the late Dean
Richmond:
An honorable Senator from ,,tht
rural districts, a paragon of rural vir,
tue, was once approached by the late
Dean Richmond in regard to bill tt
increase the fares on the Contra
Railroad. Mr.. Richmond ably anC
earnestly discussed the point. H.
alluded to the high prices of iron anC
labor, and appealed to the member
sentiments Of Justice. Sir" said he
! with your vote the bill will pass
OF course to such a man as you
can not talk money" Cant your
answered the rural member, then i
: you can't you had better send some
body to me that canf' It rnay be un
necessary to add that the membe
? voted for the bill.