Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1867-08-24
ASHTABULA, OHIO, SATURDAY, AUGUST "a, 1867
Written for the Toledo Blade.
NASBY,

The Negro being found not AUdilabLe, Mr..
Nasty and his .foIlOiUers Decide to 90 back
on hind Meeting, the effect sUItich uas
SpOited 6y Pollock, the IHinois StOre-keep-
er and Joseph Bigler, late c. ". a. -.
POsT OFFS CoNFEDR1r ROADS
Stait Nv Kentucky)
July 2S, 1867
The speculation in wool, into which
the Dimocracy NV the South embarkt
some months ago, hez, / regret to say re-
sultid disastrously. The nigger amt fit
ted for co-operashen with the Dimocrisy.
lnstid NV hangin onto us like the ivy on
to the oak, he diskivereG that, in the
South at least, he wuz really the oak and
we the ivy; instid of lOokin up to us,
he contraotid a disagreeable habit NV
lookln down onto us. There wuz other
reasons why he coodent be made availa-
BILE for our uses, and therefore, it was de-
cided to go back onto the Afrikin. and
to agln attempt his reduckshen to
ez near his normal speer ez the abnormal
condlshen ov the times would admit.
The directors Nv the college met and
changed the name NV the Institushen
back to the Southern Military & Class
ikle Institoot," and the Corners wuz it
self agin. .
Deekin Pogram lookt ez tho ten years
he'd bin lifted off him. "How pleasant
'tis," sed he, "to walk erect in front
nv niger, and to pass en- ez tho they
WIZ niggers! Oh, ef Good only wallop
one wunst more, methinks l could die
happy" ~e eag.. s...e .r
We he'd mectin last mite to consider
this nigger question, which wood hev re-
sultld III great good and he'd powerful
lntlooence toward strengthenin the hands
NV our bretherin in the North, who are
fightin the heresy NV nigger suffrage he'd
1t not bin for that irritashen Pollock,
and that pest. Joe Rigler l he'd made
my regler speech on the nigger and
with much effect. I he'd quoted from
sumbOdy's quotation from Agassiz, witch
demonstrated the radicle difference, there
is atween the Afrikin and the proud Cau-
casshun; arguin from the length nv his
Eeel and arm; the thickness NV his skull
and so forth, that the nigger wuz totally
unfit to exercise the rites NV free men.
l wuz applauded vociferously and by
none more than by Pollock and Joe Big
Ter. Ez | took my seat and wuz a wipin
the PRECIPITATION from my classikle brow
feelin that l he'd settled that question,
Pollock riz and desired to say few
words and made suggestion. Sed he:
81 have listened with interest to the
elokent speeker and am happy to say l
hev learned fax WITCH is new to me. | hev
ever doubted the inferiority NV the Mig
ger, them doubts are removed, previdin
alluz, that the statements NV the speeker
is troo, NV which hev no doubt, ez the
character NV the speeker is suflishent
guarantee for the trooth NV whichever he
sez." r-ts .-s.r
| bowed stately-likc, with the air NV
one to whom sich compliments wuz
every day affair, which they aint by no
means, on the contrary quite the reverse.
But want it demonstrated to the sat
istackshen NV the most obtoose-I want
rite here measurement NV the average
Afrikin and the average white man, that
all the world may know the difference.
| move that it be did. ="
| acceded. "Let it be done" said !,
"that the vexed question may be settled
forever" 1871
Several niggers were askt to submit
to the meas urement, but all refused
Finally Joe Bigler sed he saw Napoleon
johnson, n niger wich wunst belonged
to Deekin Pogram, i'll the audience
Napoleon" sed he, "will 700 contribbit
yoorself to the great scienc NV ethnolo-
gy? Amt yoo willin to let us use you
awhile to demonstrate the crate and
GROWN trooth that your grandfather
wuz monkey? Step up Napoleon" %.
Napoleon, nothin dasht, slept up, and
Pollock, Bascom, Bigler and l measured
him with the follerin result: 40