Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1867-09-18
HOW I CAME TO EE MARRIED.

got rib and baby Shadows departed
oyster stews, brandy cocktails, cigar
boxes, boot-jacks, absconding shirt but
tons, whist and dominoes. Shadow pres
ent--hoop skirts, nd-boxes, ribbons,
CATERS, long stockings, Juvenile dresses,
tin trumpets, little willow chairs, cradles,
bibs, spap, sugar teats, paregoric, hive
syrup, rhubarb, SIENNA, salts, squills, and
doctors bills Shadows future-more
nine pound babies, more hive syrup, ETC.,
etc.
I'll just tell you how got caught. I
was always the darndest, most tea custard,
bashful fellow you ever did see it was
kinder in my line to be taken with the
shakes every time I saw a pretty gal ap-
preaching me. and I'd cross the street
any time rather than face one; 'twasn't
because didn't like the critters, for if [
was behind a fence, looking through
knot hole, [ couldn't look at one long
enough. Well, my sister Lib gave
party one night, and [ stayed away from
home because | was too bashful to face
the music [ hung round the house,
whistling cold Dan Tucker" dancing to
keep my feet warm, watching the heads
bobbing up and down behind the window
curtains, and wishing the laundering
party would break up, so [ could get to
my room. ! smoked up bunch of ci
CARS, and as it was getting late and mighty
uncomfortable, concluded to shin up the
door post No sooner said than done,
and | soon found myself in bed. "Now,"
says I, ''let her rip Dance till your wind
giyes out" And euddling under the
sheets, Morpheus grabbed me.
| was dreaming of soft she'll crabs and
stewed tripe, and was having good time,
when somebody knocked at the door and
woke me up. Rap" again. [ laid low.
''Rap, rap, rap'' Then [ heard whis-
per, and [ knew there was whole raft
of girls outside. "Rap, rap" Then
Lib sings out, "Jaek, are you there p
Yes" says l. Then came roar of
laughter. BY thunder !! / began to get
riled. ''Get out, you petticoated scare
crows! !" cried. Can't you get beau
without hauling fellow out OF bed =? I
won't go home with you'll won't-so
you may CiCaI OuE AIrO GIIOWIuS d
boot at the door, I felt better.
But presently, oh mortal buttons ! [
heard a still, small voice, very much like
sister Lbs, and it said, "Jack, YOU'LL
have to get up, for all the girls things
are in there =
Oh, Lord what pickle Think Of
me in bed, all covered with shaWls, auffs,
bonnets and cloaks, and twenty girls out
side the door, waiting to get in J Ii L
had stopped to think, [ should have fain-
ted on the spot. AS it was, | rolled
out among the bonnet-wire and ribbons IN
a hurry. Smash went the millinery in
every direction. [ had to dress in the
dark-for there was crack In the door,
and girls will peek-and the way | fun
bled about was death to straw hats.
| The critical moment came. | opened
the door, and found myself right among
the women. Oh, my Leghorn p cries
one; "my dear, darling, winter velvet p
cries another, and they pitcaed in-they
pulled me this way, and that, boxed my
ears, and one hright-eyed little piece,
| SAL, her name was-put her arms
around my neck, anu Kissed me rlShG on
my lips. Human nature couldn't stand
that, and [ gave her as good as she sent
| 1t was the first time ever got a taste,
and it was powerful good. | believe l
could have kissed that girl from Julius
| Caesar to the Fourth of July. "Jack, %
she said, 1--WE are sorry to disturb you,
but won't you see me home? '.1es, [
WILL" 1 replied. [ did do it, and had
| another smack at the gate, too. After
that, we took kinder turtle-doving after
each other, both Of US signing like bar
rel of new cider when We were away from
each other.
Twas at the close of glorious summer
day-the sun was sitting behind distant
hog -pen--the chickens were going to
roost--the bull frogs were commencing
I tb air ovap;nr sopoS-tha rol1uuaoc in