The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1867-03-19
MRS. ORUDLES CURTAIN LECTURES.
Continued from our last issue.
THE TWENTIETH LECTURE.

man. What do you sayY You Oish Ihad?
Mr. Caudle, I'll not lie quiet in my own bed
to be insulted. Oh yes, you did mean to in
suit me. ] know what you mean. You mean,
II had been born man, you'd never have
married me. That's pretty sentiment |
think and after the wife I've been to you'll
And now l suppose you'll be going to public
dinners every day it's no use your telling
me you've only been to one before that's
nothing to do with it-nothing at all. Of
course you'll be out every night now.
knew what it would come to when you we're
made mason: when you were onse made
brother, as you call yourself knew where
the husband and father would be Pm sure,
Caudle and though Pm your own wife,
grieve to say it-I'm sure you have MT SO
much heart, that you have any to spare for
people out of doors. Indeed, should like to
see the man who has No, no. Caudle I'm
by no means a selfish wOman-quite the con-
trary | love my fellow-creatures as a wife
and mother Of family, who has only to look
to her own husband and children ought to
love EN-.
"a brother indeed! What would Won
say, if ! was to go and be made a sister p
Why, know very well-the house would MT
hold you.
"Where'S yom acatch ? How should know
where your watch is You ought to know.
But to be sure, people who 60 to public din
ners never know where anything is when
they come home. You've lost it., no doubt
and t will serve you quite right if you have.
If it should be gone-and nothing more likely
i wonder if any of your brothers will give
you another? Catch 'em doing it.
" lon must ftnd your Udtch? and youU get up
for At? Nonsense-don't be foolish-lie, still.
Your watch is the mantle-piece.
Ha Isn't it good thing for you, you've
somebody to take care of it
"What do you say Pm dear creature?
Very dear, indeed, you think me, dare say.
But the fact is, you don't know what you're
talking about tonight. I'm a fool to open my
lips to you-but l can't help it.
"WhereS your vatch? Haven't told you
on the mantel-piece? AL right, indeed?
Pretty conduct you men call all right. There
now, hold your tongue, Mr.. Caudle, and go to
sleep: Pm sure tits the best thing you can do
tonight. You'll be able to listen to reason
tomorrow morning now, it's thrown away
upon you.
"Where's yom chech-book? Never mind your
check-book. took care of that. What b,tsi-
ness had to take 1t out of your pocket Every
business. Nc, no. If you choose to go to
public dinners, why-as Pm only your wife
l can't help it. But know what fools men
are made of there and if | know it, you never
take your check book again with you. What
Didn't see your name down last year for ten
pounds Job Caudle, Esq, fl0.' 1t looked
very well in the newspapers, of course and
you thought yourself somebody, when they
Knocked the tavern tables; but | only wish
I'd been there;-yes | only wish I'd been in
the gallery. If wouldn't have told piece of
my mind, Pm not alive. Ten pounds, indeed
and the world thinks you a very fine person
for it. / only wish | could bring the world
here, and show 'em what's wanted at home.
l think the world would alter their mind then;
yes-a little.
"What do you say2 A rife has no right to
pick her husbands pocket? A pretty husband
you are, to talk in that way Never mind:
you can't prosecute her for it--or I've no
doubt you would; none at all. Some men
would do any thing. What? You'Ue bit of
a headache? | hope you have-and a good
bit too. You've been to the right place for
it. No--I won't hold my tongue. It's all
very well for you nIon to 60 TO taverns-aud
falkland toast-and hurra-ana--l wonder
you re not all ashamed of yourselves to drink
the Queens health with all the honors, be-
heve, you call it-yes, pretty hOncrs You pay
to the seX-I say, ! wonder you're not
ashamed to dril that blessed creatures
Realth, when you We only tC think low you
asa your own wives at hOnt. But tLc hypo.
GhSe 4bet = men are,-oh!
NWeeAc car 1Cd'tt Haven't ] told you
rs u4t ~ your Dillow-there, you needn't 80
kNihg ,,lit. tell you it's under your ill
IgW. 3" ed a7gkH Yes; great deal You
hrDV & what's Iislt Just now. Hal was
fhcI, = u any pOol sUHI used as am! I'm q
GGr, 'nrm( Pan Lir. Caudle Pve olly
10 saY, P5n tired OF your conduct-quite tired,
and don't care how soon there's an end of it.
"Why dd / take gOar c3Cck-JOoE3 I've told
you-to save yor, from luin, Mr.. Caudle.
You're not going TO 0e TorHed? Ha you don't
know anything when you're out. | know
what they do at those public cdinners--charities,
they call em /; pretty charities True Charity,
believe, always dimes at home. know what
they do: the whole system s n trick. No:
T'm not stony-hearted creature: and you ought
to be ashamed to say so to your wife and the
mother of your children, but, you'll not
make me cry tonight can tell yOu-I was
going to say that-oh! you're such an aggra-
waiting man don't know what | was going to
say T. Uo r., ,, ...
that there's anything to thank Heaven about
/ was going to say, know the trick of public
dinners. They get lord or a duke, if they
can catch him-anything TO make people say
they've dined with nobility that's it--yes,
they get one of these people, with a star per-
hans in his coat, to take the chair-and to talk
all sorts of sugar-plum things about charity
and to make foolish men, with wine in 'em,
feel that they've no end or money; and then
shutting their eyes to their wives and
families at home-all the while that their own
faces are red and flushed like poppies, and
thew think tomorrow will never cOme-then
they get em to put their hand to paper.
Then they make 'em pull out their checks.
But | took your book, Mr.. Caudle-you
couldn't do il a second time. What are you
Ianpbing atY NOHiagf It's no matter:
shall see it in the paper tomorrow for II you
gave anything you were too proud to hide It,
know your charity.