The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1867-09-12
Saved hy : Miracle.

The Trenton, N. J. american, sadly
tcopperhead sheet, thinking of what it de.
serves in the other world, has the grace
to admit thatit will be ''darned tight
| squeeze for its friends if it should es-
cape, and narrates the following:
Question to be debated at the next
meeting of the exclusives of the Loyal
League: ssCan mandying in the Dem
ocratic faith. with all the perquisites of a
Christian go to Heaven There are a
very large number of people who don
believe be can. The debate will be an
animated one, although like the handle
of jug, all on one side Who will take
the affirmative?
Why, We will, and sustain it by relat-
ing "a Boston Story, which is precisely in
point. Many years since there lived in
the not over classic neighborhoed of Dock
Square an old fellow who was called by
the boys General H. He. kept ''gin
mill /" and prop shop, and was, alto
gether, what is known as hard case.
One morning he addressed crowd OF
loungers thus:
Boys, HAD a queer dream last night,
a most strodnary-dream.
Well, General, what was it? What
did you dreari!
well, boys, I dreamed | died. y
Where did you go to
event to heaven
go. come, General. that is too much.
Couldn't be. you know
Fact, boys, for all that went to
Heaven"
But how did you get in, General p
well. that S the queer part OF it, and
I'll tell you how You see, when | got
over there, I made my way up to the
gate and knocked. and asked what place
that was, and somebody looked over the
wall and asked me what | wanted, and
said [ wanted to come inside. Then he
said he was Saint Peter, and that was tho
gate of heaven, and | told him that was
Just where [ wanted to get to. He asked
some questions, and was just goin to let
me in, when, just my tarnal luck, along
came the devil, and he hollered out to
Peter that | belonged to him and hadn' t
any business inside. OF course | couldn' t
say nothing, but felt awful scary. Well
right away, Peter, he came outside, and
says he, Satan what claim have you on
that soul?' why says the devil, he S
been selling rum and shaking props down
in Boston for more than twenty years.
I admit that, says Pet.r. but didn t he
always sell good liquor? Well, yes, | N
bound to admit he did, said Satan
Did he ever cheat at prop shaking =
Not that | can prove We'll then says
the saint, you cant have him on that.
| begun to feel better, boys, when the
devil says he, but this fellow sold rum on
Sundays. Peter looked sharp at me, and
asked ne if it was So | dare not lie, 50
| said Yes, but always paid the largest
subscription of any man IN the parish to
the ministers salaryl' We'll, says Peter
to Satan, that alters the case again,you
see With that the devil got a little ril
ed and says he, l can't bother here all
day about him-suppose we rattle Cor
him. Agreed, says Peter, and they
threw me down and sot on me, and Satan
got the first throw, and he threw three
sixesl Oh, didn't feel myself a goner
when [ felt him wriggle his tail for he
thought, and | knew that three skies
couldn't be beat, and says he, Peter
I've got him. Hold on says he, 1
ilavn't had my throw yet. And he
took the bax, and shook, although L
couldn't see the use on it, and as | m a
Twin sinner yet. he threw ? skies and a
secent The devil jumped up quick, and
putting off, says he Peter itain no sort
of use-if you are going to come them
miracles on me, you can have him So
you see, boys | did get in, but it took a
miracle to dc it I"