Nashville union and dispatch. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1866-1868, 1867-09-26
mIsHAPs OF A mONEYLEss MAN

A Dead Head Gets in the Wrong Box
and Is SunImarIIy Elected from
Three Railway Trains.
A short time since, there was young
man connected with the department of the
Nashville and Decatur railroad, who had
a sweetheart living in Athens, Alabama.
His name was Jeems, perhaps; at any rate
he always travelled the road free, what
ever name he went by A hale fellow
we'll met, he was never known, in the
whole course of what he frequently styled
his career, to have more than a quarter in
his pocket at any one time, depending up.
on his winsome ways for the worlds favors,
and taking things as they came Upon
abandoning his old way of getting a living,
Jeems still considered himself entitled to a
free ride, and few weeks absence from his
sweetheart put him into the notion Of
visiting Athens once more.
Getting aboard a train, the conductor of
which was particular friend, he was soon
at his destination, and after a fond re-
newal of his plighted troth and good
time generally, he was ready to return.
With all the confidence with which he had
set out from Nashville, he took the first
train, secured coy seat, threw his head
behind a morning paper, elevated his slick
boots far above the level of his capacious
nat, and settled himself with the GOODNESS
and precision which only a true dead head
knows how to affect.
Bell and whistle sounded, and the train
moved rapidly off Before a mile had
been gone over, however, the conductor
started on his rounds, and as fate would
have it, Jeems was ensconced in the
first car Tickets, sir" said the man of
checks brusquely, as he nudged the seem
inglv unconscious youth. Jeems looked
up little wildly, thrust his hand ner-
vously into his pocket, and calculated,
Don't you know me? l go free on this
road-always hare done it." "Not on this
train" replied the conductor-'this is no
dead-head concern, and if you don't choose
10 fork over without any more Of this put
tering, I'll put you off, Pve no time to
waste" "Well, Pm ready, retorted Jeems,
desperately rising to his feet, "hain't a
darned cent to bless myself"
The cord was ierked, the train stopped,
anu J6GLlH, W HIS AOAAOi1 AOhiAN AAAAASClA
directly opposite the door of his sweet
hearts cottage home, and there she sat at
the window, watching everything that
transpired, her attention having been at
tracted by the stopping of the cars.
Making the best of a bad job, however, the
unlucky fellow walked bravely up to the
door and was quickly ushered in, where
confused account of having forgotten some-
thing in town satisfied his interroga!ors,
and he shortly after started back to catch
the next train.
He got aboard when it came along, and
was soon on his way, tatterIng himself
that he would not be again molested. But
luck was against him that day, and new
conductor ousted him with as little cere-
mony as had attended his involuntary
change Of cars in the morning. FortU-
nately his sweetheart was absent this time
and he poked back to town in a brown
studyssof ways and means for nights
lodging. Having eaten no breakfast, his
appetite had come to him with his nisfor-
tunes and TO make matters worse there
would be no train for Nashville until the
next day.
How he passed that long night could
scarcely be told, and his JOY knew no
bounds as he quickly rose FROM lonely
lumber pile next morning on the approach
of another train, which he jumped aboard
of before il reached the station. lie was
not to be driven of this time, and unob-
served by the baggage master, he quietly
placed himself behind the trunk Of lady
bound for Saratoga. and in a few minutes
fell asleep. At the next station some
more baggage was piled in, waking him,
and from remark of the baggage master
that the big trunk was to be moved, ne
made up his mind that his safety and
reputation demanded immediate action,
and in an instant he sided noise
! lesslv from the car, unobserved, and sat
down to try his luck again in the afternoon.
Waiting long and patiently, the poor iel-
low at last began to see the end OF his
trouble. With the next train came con-
ductor who knew him, and before whom he
laid the whole story, received free ride
TO Nashville and hasn't see a railway tram
since