davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
The Little Boys RebuLe.

There was once very old man who
lived IN the house OF hiS son. The old
man was deaf his eyes were dim. and
his les weak and ihin When he was
II table he could hardly hold liS spoon.
50 much did his hand shake: ana al
times he would spill his soup on the
cloth. All this vexed his son and sons
wife and they made the old man sit in a
corner behind the Store. There he ale
hl> food from an eartheIn-ware dish.
and lie had not ALWAYS too much 10
eat as you NAV guess, Well, one day
lis trembling hands could nol hold the
dish: II fell on the floor. and broke. Al
thl> hi> son and hi> sons wife were % 1ex-
ed thai they spoke harshly 10 The poor
oh man Ills only answer was = deep.
sad sigh They then brought hun a
bowl made of wood. out OF which he had
10 take his food, Not long after this,
hls little grandson Il boy OF about four
wears of aye, WAS seen at work with 4
chlSel and hammer, following out a log
OF wood Ills parents could not guess
what he was trying 10 DO. The little
boy sad nothing 10 any one, but kept at
work on The log, and looked very grave,
as If lie had some great work in hand.
What sre Won dong there - asked his
father The little boy did not want to
tell. Then his mother asked, What
are You doing, my son - Oh - said
he. Il am only making a little trough,
such as our PIGS eat out Of" but Whist
are you making ii for. .,v son - Il
am making ii, said he, flor You and
father 10 eat out OF when / am i man
The parents looked AT each other. and
burst INTO tears From that time forth.
they treated the old man well. He had
The best place At the table. a nice dish.
and plenty Of ioud--Ih N,rsery y,r
Jm.t.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
Hints to Husbands.

do not Jest with your wife unon q
subject IN which there Is danger of wound
ing her feelings. Remember that .be
treasures every word YOU utter, though
YOU never think of II again. DO not
speak of some virtue in another mans
wife 10 remind your own of a faux. do
NOT reproach your wife with personal de-
iecis, for, if she has sen.ibility, YOU IN
filct wound difficult 10 heal. DO not
treat your wife with inatteniion In COM
pany- do not upbraid her in the pres
ence OF a third person, nor entertain her
with pralsing the beauty and accomplish
mentS of other women. If YOU would
have a pleasant home and cheerful wife.
pass your evenings under vour own roof.
do not be stern and silent IN your own
house, and remarkable for sociability
elsewhere. Remember that your wife
has rs much need OF recreation p veur-
self, and devote a purtion, al least. Of
your leisure hours 10 such society and
amn>ements as She NAV Join. Bv 80
dOlng, YOU will secure her smiles and in
crease her affection. DO not. bv being
too exact in pecuniary matters, make
your wife feel her dependence upon your
bounty IL tends 10 lessen her dignity OF
character. and does not increase her es-
TEEN for you If she Is a sensible wo-
man, she should lac acquainted with your
business, and know your income. that
she may regulate her household expenses
accordingly DO not withhold this know
edge, IN order TO cover your own extray-
aggance- Women have keen PERCEPTION ;
be sure she viii discover vour selfishness.
and, though no word l. spoken, from that
moment her respect IS le,sened, and her
confidence diminished, pride wounded,
and a thousand, perhaps unjust, suspic-
ions created. From that moment Is vour
domestic comfort on the wane.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
4 Curious EpitapH.

A correspondent of the London Stand
ari sends the following copy of a curious
epitaph. taken from 4 memorial in the
churchyard of Lydford, in Devon:
Here lies in horizontal position
The OUTSIDE case of
George Routleigh, matchmaker
Whose abilities in that line were an honor
To his profession,
Integrity was the man spring
And prudence the regulator
OF all the actions OF his life:
Humane, generous and liberal,
His hand never stopped
Till he had relieved distress.
So nicely regulated were all his actions
That he never trem wrCny
Except when set Il gong
BY people
Who did not know
His key;
Even then he was easily
Set right again.
He had the art of di.posing his ta.e
So well
That his hours glided away
In one continual r0mld
OF pleasure and delight,
Till an unlucky minute put period TO
His existence.
He departed this life l4th November, $50:
Aged 81.
Wound ap
In hopes of being taken in hgud
BY his Maker,
And of being thoroughly cleared, repaired
and set a going
In the world to come.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
Some Facts about Tobacco,

Ree's Cyclopedia says drop Or two
Of the oil, placed on the tongue of cat,
produces convulsions and death in the
space of minute.
A College of physicians has said
that not less than twenty thousand in
our land annually die by use of this
poison.
DR.. Shaw names some eighty disease,
and says that they may be attributed to
tobacco.
Governor Sullivan says, ''My brother,
General Sullivan, used snuff, and hi:
snuff lodged him prematurely in the
grave"
Bocarme, of Belgium, was murdered
in two minutes and half by little nico
tine, or alkali of tobacco.
A youth of sixteen fell dead, with &
cigar in his month, in a dram shop
What caused his death ? The coroner:
inquest said that "it was mysteriou:
act of God" The minister, at the funer.
al, consoled the friends, by saying mucI
the same thing. Physicians said it wa
heart disease. A sensible woman know.
ing the boys habits, said, Tobacco kill
ed him." 1t deranged the action of tn,
heart; it ceased to beat and the victim
| fell.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
4 NOret Case of Domestic "InTe-
Ncity."

This, like everything new in the line OF
domestic difficulties. comes from Chicago:
George Bush and his wife reside on
Bunker, near Canal street, and the hus-
band was arraigned in the police court
for beating his wife 1t was not alleged
that Georges abuse proceeded from
lntoHication- On the contrary, he Is a
sober industrious man. He has his ca
prices, however, and one of these IS that
after retiring 10 bed at night his wife
must scratch his back Tor him, This
IS an indulgence which George cannot
forego- He has been accustomed 70
having the operation performed ever
since the first week OF his honeymoon.
and has latterly entertained the belief
that II was specified in the marriage con-
tract Mrs Bush has for long time Sc
cretly regarded this requirement ON the
part THAT Is, the back of her husband As
very onerous. and has quite seriously
protested against IL After weary day
OF household duties, it seemed TO her a
repetition of her toiling over the wash
board, TO devote half hour every night
IN creating rosy flush upon the spinal
column of her eHaciins husband, Ii
might be a pleasure 10 him, but ii was
certainly selfish one. in which she had
not particle of sympathy She reSol-
we'd TO free herself from this seryitude.
and to accomplish the desired result con-
celved an idea worthy of the feminine
heart. She quietly secured curry-comb
with small fine teeth, the vigorous Use
OF which upon the epidermis of horse
or an elephant might produce pleasure
able sensations but in lis application to
the backs of human beings would natu-
rally excite preludioes and profanity
lhls instrument she secretly placed con-
yenlent for use, and on Monday night
after the couple had retired 10 bel. the
husband assumed his usual position to
receive the accustomed scratching. Qui-
city reaching out for the currv-comh
Mrs. Bush, whose muscles had acquired
peculiar strength from The ott-rcpeated
operations, '-raked' The broad cxpamse OF
cutlcle some two or three lines back and
forth in the most lively manner Giving
utterance 10 one tremendous vell. the As
tonished and infuriaied husband sudden
ly kicked the wife some distance out of
bed. With excited and lacera,el back
and feelings, and many an emphatic oath,
he quickly followed the direction his wife
had taken, andprocee,lel 10 administer a
summary beating. For this >he caused
his arres;- In consideration uf tie har-
rowing provccaiion, Mr.. Bash WAS fined
only S3, and advised to iiorego. hereafter.
any domestic enjoyment which his wife
could net share
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

Iroiane swearing never did any man
any good No man Is richer. or hap
pier, or wiser for il Il commends no
one TO any society 1t Is disgusting 10
the refined; abominable 10 the GOOD in
sultin@ 10 those with whom we associate;
degrading TO the mind; Improbable,
needless, and injurious TO society.
4 One OF our printers, who used TO set
type in the Tribune Office, smiled audilly
Yesterday when somebody wondered that
Horace Greeley could be willing TO let his
name 60 down 10 poster,iy affixed 10
jeff Davis lail bonds, Horace knows,
he says, that posterity can't rad The sig
nature--BgJ'rlo E7r,os.
/ 4 butcher let sailor have a shoulder
OF mutton on trust, but finding a day or
two after that he had gone 10 a foreign
land, sand: MY word, but if | had
known he never intended paving for II,
would have charged penny a pound
more for IL"
\ young gentleman, who Was al one
time very much s1nifien with a pretty
little "fiend," said that In his travels
through the West Indies he often felt
some very severe shocks from earth
quakes, but they were not 4 circumstance
when compared with those which he rx-
perienced from this little earih-quaker.
The republicans Of the Connecticut
legislature are unanimous in favoring
an amendment striking the word white
from their state constitution.
The editor of the WoonsocLet Patriot
makes merry over the mistake of an old
Shanghae hen Of his that has been setting
for FIVE weeks upon two round stones
and piece of brick. Her anxietr,''
he says, 'Is no greater than ours to know
what she will hatch. If il proves a brick
yard, that hen is not for sale
n western contemporary SAYS, "Ad-
vertising Is TO the trade what plowing IS
TO the farmer. There would be some
natural production if the sod of the
earth was never broken, and ii would
hold about the same relation 10 the pro-
duction Of a well cultivated garden, that
the profits Of unadvertised trade DO TO
the adverfised.'
This Is the way man out West saw
rats steal eggs: One clasPed an egg
tightly between his fore legs and chin
and then turned himself on his back.
when another rat seized him by the tail
and dragged rat, egg and all away 10 his
hole.
pride goeth before fall" 1t often
goes before waterfall,
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
4unt Patty's Last Offer.

Aunt Patty was one of those universal
aunts that used frequently to be met with
in country villages She was not re-
markable except on account of rejecting
a wealthy suitor, through mercenary
motives. That may appear paradoxical
at first sight, but the facts will ex-
plain.
At the time the event occurred, Aunt
Patty was neither young or pretty. She
had been in her youth both a beauty and
a belle, very much courted, as they al
ways are, and at the time our story be-
gins had been twice married, and both
times left in INDECENT circumstances.
The person who owned the premises,
once her own, permitted her to live in a
part Of the dwelling, by right ofpossession,
| suppose. She had no visible means of
support, unless it might have been her
knitting work. She was "Mother in
Israeli and person Of great influence
in society, Notwithstanding her lack OF
bank stocks and bonds She was church
eleemosynary, and the members, who
were farmers, levied voluntary taxes up
ON themselves to provide for her. The
result was, she always had an abun-
dant supply, not only OF the necessaries
of life but the luxuries. She lived bet
ter than the best of them. She had the
best pile of wood in her woodhouSe, the
best store of vegetables and fruit in her
cellar, and she rode to church in the best
style. 1t was seldom brother passed
her door without bringing tribute. Il
they made the attempt she was sure tc
call after them to inquire after the
health of their families, and how the
poultry fourished If they had any
chickens to kill? "For her part, sht
did not feel well, her appetite was poor. .
On Sundays she was alway ready fol
church when the brother appeared il
sight who rode in the handsomest anG
most comfortable carriage. 1t did no
matter if one of the members of the fami
ly, particularly the youngest, was. In
commoded, she ''knew they would lik'
to walk the rest of the way, they had al
ready rode SO far" and it was only 1
step from her dwelling to the church IL
winter, whoever was so fortunate as tc
have the best sleigh and robes was sur,
to find Aunt Patty just emerging from
her door, toot-stove in hand, intendin,
to walk to church if they had not ap
peared so opportunely.
As tavorite of Aunt Patty's l wa
occasionally INDUCED with reminiscence
Of her early and palmly days. 1 regre
that my memory's storehouse was no
capacious enough to retain the number G
offers that she had been honored with
Perhaps it is because | was more interest
!, ed in her first husband, who was physl
, clan, and whom she eulogized with fond
est tears. She would wind up with
deep sigh, saying, ''Ah !! Louisa, there
few such men as DIR. Sandun - At 9th
er times her second would be her theme
He was deacon and never such ma
, lived as he. She would recount his viz
tues, and with deep sigh exclaim, "Ah
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
Copy Of a WU.

The following Is the copy OF an an
Gent document picked up near Peters.
burg, Va. by Sergt. Laiayette Soper.
about the time the rebels were leaving
that stronghold, followed bv the victo-
rious Union army, ot which Sergt. Sopsl
was valiant and suffering member:
In tie name Of Cop. 4nsea. /. Thomas
Harrison, Sr.. of Prince George county
and parish of Martins Brandon. being
aged and Intirm, but of sound and dis
posing mind and memory-;hanh> be to
God for the sIme-and calling TO mind
the uncertainty of tins life. have thought
proper 70 make and ordain this. nv last
will and testament. IN manner .nl form
following, viz -
Iupr'n.',,-I give and bequeath 10 nv
nephew, William Harrison (son of nv
dear brother Williaml five hundred
pounds, cash. 10 be raised ont of the
debts due me likewise nv negro boy.
Frank. my black horse, and 4 full suit OF
mourning. 10 him and his heirs forever.
Ham.-I give and bequeath 10 INV
nephew, Jones Harrison. the following
negroes, namely: Tim, Charles and Doll.
together with her present and future in
crease, 10 him and his heirs forever.
Etm.-I give and bequeath 70 NV
niece, Elizabeth Watson, nv negro man.
Adam, and one hundred pounds. cash. TO
be raised out of the debts due me. TO her
and her heirs forever.
Eem.-I give and bequeath TO nv
niece, Mary Watson, nv negro woman.
Annica, and boy, Lewis also. one hun
dred pounds. cash, TO be raised out of
the debts due me, TO her and her heirs
forever
Item-I give and bequeath 10 NV
niece, Jenev Scott Watson. INV negro
boy, Pleasant, and one hundred pounds.
cash, TO be raised out of the debts due
me, TO her and her heirs forever.
Aem-I give and bequeath TO nv sis
ter, Martha Neblett, sixty pounds. cash.
TO be raised out of the debts due me. to
her and her heirs forever.
Itc1n.-l give and bequeath to my Sis
ter, Rebeccs Harrison. sixty pounds.
cash, TO be raised out of the debts due
me, TO her and her heirs forever.
Ltem-I hereby emancipate and set
free the following negroes, namely: Jen-
nv, Phebe, Jack Campbell, Molly Camp
bell, and all their future increase like
wise my negro woman, Rachel, with all
her present and future increase. TO enjoy
their liberty TO all intenis and purposes
as if they had been born free.
LEM give and bequeath TO Robert.
William Hardyman and Henry Harrison,
Sns OF my dear nephew, Robert TIarri-
son, fifty pounds, cash, each. TO be raised
out of the debts due me, TO them and
their heirs forever.
Iem-All the rest and residue of NV
estate of every kind and denomination
whatsoever, l give and bequeath to my
two nephews, Jones Harrison and vii
liam Harrison (sOn of my brother VIII
liam) to be equally divided between them
TO them and their heirs forever.
h7a-l desire my estate may not be
appraised.
Lastly, | constitute, nominate and ap-
point my aforesaid nephew, William
Harrison nv whole and sole executor Of
this my last will and testament, revoking
all Others 10y me heretofore made In
witness whereof / have hereunto set my
hand and affixed my seal, this 18th day
of May, one thousand seven hundred and
ninety-nine. THos HARRISON.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
LOrei'S.

They linger in the garden walk,
Talking as only lovers talk;
Sweet. foolish tritles. loves delight.
With JOY and faith their faces bright.
Sometimes she stops and plucks a rose.
To hide the truth her sweet blush shows
Scattering the rose-leaves in the air,
A dainty shower DER face and hair.
With laughing look she sees them fly.
Then sudden stops and breathS sigh.
For youth and love as soon are gone,
And death and age are Fastening on.
He gathers from the garden plot,
\ TUT of pale fOrget-me-not;
She takes them with careless Jest.
Then hides them in her snowy breast.
He lays a rosebud in her hair.
Whispering she is wondrOus fair;
While tenderly his loving hands
Linger DER the ripping bands.
They pause to watch the evening sky.
And see the golden sunlight die;
\ squirrel startled from his lair
Breaks the calm quiet OF the air.
She tritles with her golden curls.
Till the bright flag the wind unfurls,
And blows 4 tress across his face,
Touching his lips with soft embrace.
They reach the great hall door at last.
He holds her slender fingers fast,
Then kisaes them, as well he may,
While she. all blushing, speeds away.
-Nep York Saturday Erening Post
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

Effect OF MIXING BABIES. Some
time ago there was dancing party Civ
ell in Wisconsin. Most of the ladies'
present had little babies, whose noisy
pervcrslty required too much attention to
permit the mothers TO enjoy the dance.
A number of gallant men volunteered to
mind the young ones while The parents
lndulged In break down" No soon
er had the mothers left the babies in
charge OF the mischievous rogues, than
they stripped the infants, changed their
clothes, giving the apparel to one anoth-
er. The dance over, it was time TO go
home, and the mothers hurriedly took
each baby in the dress of her own, and
started 10 their homes, some ten or fif-
teen miles Cti. and were far on their way
before daylight. But the day following
there was tremendous row in the SET
tlement mothers discovered that a single
nigh! had changed the sex of their babies.
observation disclosed physical phenomena
and then commenced some of the tallest
female pedestrianism living miles apart,
II required two days TO unmix the ba-
bles, and as many months to restore the
women to their natural sweet disposition.
10 this day it is unsafe for any of the
baby mixers TO venture into the territory.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

PURE AIR. little sink near a
kitchen doorstep, inadvertently formed,
has been known, although not exceeding
in its dimensions single square foot, tc
spread sickness through a whole house.
hold. Hence, everything of the kind
should be studiously obviated, SO thai
there be no spot about farmhouse
which can receive and hold standing wa.
ter, whether it be the pure rain from the
sky, the contents Of a wash-basin, the
slOp-bowl, or the water-pail.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
Il Pathetic Ballad.
By the lake where dropped the willow,

By the lake where dropped the willow
Row. vessels, row;
want to be an angel,
And jump Jim Crow.
An old crow sat on hickory limb,
None knew him but to praise;
Let me kiss him for his mother,
For he smells of Schweitzer kase.
The minstrel to the war has gone,
With the banjo on his knee;
He woke to hear the sentries shrek,
There's light in the window for the,
A frog he would wooing 20.
His hair was curled to kill:
lie used to wear an old gray coat.
And the sword of Bunker Hill:
Oft in the Silly night,
Make way for liberty! he cried;
won't go home till morning,
With Peggy by my side.
am dying, Egypt, dying,
Susannah don't you cry;
Know how sublime thing it is
10 brush away the blue tailed tly.
The boy stood on the burning deck,
With his baggage checked for Troy ;
One of the few immortal names.
His name was Pat Mulloy.
Mary had little lamb,
He could tale unfold;
He had no teeth to eat hoe cake.
As his spectacles were gold.
Lay on. lay on Madcutf,
Man wants but little here below,
And I'm to be queen OF the May.
So kiss me quick and go.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

The boys in this place have discovered
new source of enjoyment. They gather
all the mud turtles they can find, harness
them up tandem style, and by punching
them lightly with sharp sticks, set them
travelling. One little fellow has collect
ed over twenty of the lively and beauti-
full creatures, and he insists that they
know everything he says TO them, mind
him, and like him '.fust ."-Netr
Britain Record.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
JEFF. DAVIS IN TOWN.

'ps the inhabitants of St Johnebury a. a gener-
are Lot aware that jeff Davis was in town YES
.,'. W. hear II reported that he came with the in
purchasing Lounge and Spring Mattress for
a US, u'5 OF CASINO. But was at once informed
u'4Id not have them any price, that the only
. /, would be willing to furuish him would be such
u''aed our brave boys At the Libby. E-5S
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

There are to be two equal suffrage
conventions in New Jersey, one on the
4th of June and the other on the 23d of
July, owing to disagreement among the
members of the republican state COM
mittee.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

A member of the Minnesota Legisla-
ture moved recently to increase the pay
Of the law makers one dollar per d,ade1.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

ga woman is at the bottom of all mis-
chief" said Joe. YES" said Frank; sand
when l used to get into mischief, my
mother was at the bottom Of me-"
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

To prevent your hair from coming out
never let your wife catch you kissing
the servant girl.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07
kANUFACTURING PURPOSES
ROVER & BAKER SEWING MACHINE co.
ORESS AND CLOAK MAKING.

'l'> =. l.. LIVINGSTON has taken rooms opposite
Johusbury House. over !. b. Gorham's hat and
re, wheIr she will be ready to serve the ladies
"-si. for dress or cloak making
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1867-06-07

Terms s-One copy Per annum. So so
/! paid strictly in advance. ce................$2 So 90
POstage.-The postage The Caledonian to sub
rb-s in this county is free to any part the ned
states outside Of this county, five cents per quarter,
twenty cents year. payable in advance at the office
,.herc the paper is received.
special Notice. Each -ub.criber will fnd on his
paper in connec ion with his address, the date to
sLich he has paid. When new payment Is made the
.,r Will be advanced to correspond II the change
NJ made correctly the first or second paper from
attn u payment, wish TO BE- notified immed-
49,:
LIB Printing of all kinds done at living prices
p,pr.s aud Cards kept constantly on hand.
Rates of Advertising.
os ,r4are az lines, inch space ueek .$lO0
EIch continuance, ,......................25
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,. ,rar, (he i4h Cr space) per year r.........S.O0
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