New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1867-12-31
BROOKS on SHIN BONES.

We have some compassion for n man who
makes q speech in Congress, and then suffers
the misery of reading an abstract Of 1t tele-
graphed to the New-YoIk papers. lie is so
apt to say stupid things in the heat Of debate,
and reporters are so apt to catch at the salient
stupidites and let slip tho intervening para
graphs of sense. Therefore, when Mr.. James
Brooks, the other day, made a preposterous
speech about tho Reconstruction bill, we re-
Trained from comment because we doubted
whether the Associated Press gave fair synop-
sis of it. But our doubts were unfounded.
Mr. Brooks is so proud of his folly that he has
just written out his speech, and printed 1t Mt
full length in his own newspaper. 1t is twenty
times worse than we supposed If the honora-
BILE Representative had made n late supper of n
few dozen volumes Of Blumenbach, Camper,
Prchard, and Latham, Mott and Gliddon
on tho indigenous Races Of the
Earth" Mr.. Morton's lively work on
Crania americana, and Martins Natural
" History of Man and Monkeys this speech Is
just such nightmare as might have naturally
followed it. The question being whether a
"nigger" is fit to vote, Mr.. Brooks has vision
OF woolly heads, prognathous jaws, thick
skulls, and crooked shin bones. He dreams Of
parcel of sharp facial angles poking holes In
the Constitution, a pair of dingy legs, with
ridiculously high calves, walking into his pri-
vate dining-roOm, great big hands, with fiat
palms, and "thumb-balls scarcely prominent"
selling upon all the ballot-boxes, and CHASTITY
black figure, with spreading femoul bones, and
nostrils which present only transverse
aperture" dancing diabolcal jig over the
grave of the Democratic party. Ile beholds
all the "nigger" spectators coming down out Of
the strangers gallery, and marching in
hideOus procession into the hall Of Representa-
tives by one door, while the gentlemany
white members snatch their hats and rush
madly out at another. Then every black man
on the American continent instantly mar
res wife OF the puTo Caucasian
race; Mr.. Brooks himself leads TO tho altar n
daughter of Africa the population rapidly
grows brown the national feet flatten tho
national hair gets kink; the national shin
mounts gradually up the leg, and The Ne,c-
York Express becomes an organ Of "gris- girls,
"jujus, and fetchism." "Heed, oh heed p cries
Mr.. Brooks, in his agony; strike, but hear
Nobody ever minds what say but my sands
of life have nearly run out, and this il to be
my last speech" Look at the "nigger's" facial
angle-only 70; at the capacity of his skull
only 1871. And yet, oh my country, there are
Radicals who would let this creature vote
VOte when his hair, examined through "the
microscope, micrometer, and microtomen Zine
| climaxD is seen to be nothing but wool with a
spiral spring in it. Vote when "his teeth are
"Obliquely inserted" Vote! when "the middle
part of his foot does not touch the ground.p
What will become Of the country when the
ballot Is given to O man the middle part of
whose foot does not touch the grounds
Our readers will not have failed TO remark
that Mr.. Brooks all this time has said nothing
about color. In point of fact, he says he does
not object to the "niggeI's" color at all; It ia
purely matter Of taste, and some people like
it. But when it comes to facial angles, to tho
muscles of the shoulder, tho length of the heel
and more than all, the shape of the pelvis,
taste must give way to principle, and he puts
his foot down. WasaTIomer o nigger7 No.
Was Michael Angelo a niggeri Not bit Of it,
Was even the Emperor Napoleon, or Praxitoles
or William Shakespeare, or Samuel +. b.
Morscf Far otherwise. What do you mean
then, by letting o niger vote The initiative
genius of the niger displays itself. surplus
"ingly in music, and in variety of our cult
"nary arts" Perched on barrel he makes
slap-up fiddler, and no has talent for corn
bread But did you ever hear Of a negro
starting a steam engineer Well, yes Mr.
Brooks! A "niggcr' once "startcd steam