The Daily empire. (Dayton, Ohio) 1865-1867, 1867-04-08
The DAILY EMPIRE.
WIT AND WISDOM.

This Is good from the Boston Post;
think said Isabel the fearful aky
IS weeping sadly-only hear 10 sighi
70 hot SAD Vuill commlserato Us woes
ltdoes not weep-ito only blows its snOws.'
IL strikes us that the following stanza Is
an imitation of Pope
Vice Is a lobster of such hideous Oyesn
That TO be hated needs but TO be- seem
But boil hin soft, and see his biushfag face,
"ehrst endure, then pity, then say grace"
ONE OF HER "SwINE."--My sweet "spri0
of geraniumn has a fashion, when speaRing
OF her beaux during their absence, of styi-
ing Them my swains."
Her pa heard her speak thus.
i went TO sec Jennie one evening, and
was met ut the door by the old man"
Atter the customary chow do YOU do
and comment on the weather, he blurted
out:
Il suppose you want to see Jennie Yr
nodded afilrmatively.
lie then called her; and from up stairs,
over the balustrades, in sweetest accents
she replied
What do you want pa ?"
Come down at once, daughter, here's
one Of your sWiRe."
Imagine my sensations, amidst her ring
ing laughter after the old boys exit.
Denver, in Colorado, has 700 dogs. The
question arises, how on earth did they all
get out there2
OF the vowels, Is In bliss, G in hell, and
all the rest In purgatory.
4 woman who was enjoined to try the
effects OF kindness on her husband, and was
told that II would heap Goals of FIRE on his
head, replied that she had tried Hilin'
water, aud it didn't do a bit Of good"
AN INCIDENT OF THE WAR.-On one
occasion after the battle of Shiloh the hos
pitfalls Of the towns and cities on the Ohio
river were so crowded with wounded men.
both Confederate and Federal. that some of
them were sent to C%oyingtOn. Kentucky,
and in the Southern Mothers Home. under
the care of that benevolent institution.
On a bright and pleasant day, after some
of the wounded had become convalescent
a Confederate soldier was ont summing
himself" when a Federal soldier of tile
Teutonic persuasion also came out, and,
after walking around and cycling our Con-
federate friend for some time, accosted him
thus:
"You pees Won secesh ?"
allow do you know ?" said the Confed-
crate.
"Ye pc so tam fat"
Explain YOURSELF said the Confederate.
Fell, | bees in te hispitle myself. sees
some things vot goes on. De ladies come
In init de pasket on de arm, and she coomed
to me aud say vat you bc?' | say | PEGS
Oonion man, Wounded at Shiloh. She say
vat a pity for de beeples ven de var done
shtopeF Den she goes to you and say, vat
you bin = you say, Il pees a rebel soldier.
Wounded NIT Shiloh Den she puts her
lily vite hand in de pasket and takes out de
cake and vine, and give you ever vat you
want. After vile onOnther lady comes in,
NIT de basket on her arm, and she goes to
4 pees rebel soldier, wounded nit shiloh
She say, vat a pity DenI drinks, | goin
to get something. Veil she comes to me
and say, vat you bin p | say, i PEGS Oonion
man. Wounded nit Shiloh She sits down
her pasket and puts in her lily vite hand,
and pulls out a Cot tam Mettotis6 track !
You links a mar get fat on de tam Mettotist
tracks? De Cot tam secesh, dat gifts de
cake and vine, and ever vat da want, and de
Oonion man can't get to smell de bottle.'