Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1867-04-24

who takes him for fool will find himself
sadly deceived. He is notorious for fur
nishing the finest specimens of cool i'm
pudeuce of any man in Ohio. The fol
lowing anecdot., illustrative of this trait
of his character, is told of him:
Some wears ago, being in Philadelphia,
he received al Introduction to a prom-
nent divine of that city. The reverend
gentleman invited Joe to attend his church
on a certain Sunday, which invitation was
accepted. They entered the sacred ed'.
flee together. 1t was one OF the ilrst
churches in the city, and its members
were fashionable and aristocrasic IN the
extreme. The minister put Joe into an
elaborately. furnished pew, well to the
front. Joe nestled comfortably down into
one corner of the same, and looked about
as interesting and contended as toad
under cabbage-leaf.
After while the owner of the pew
arrived, and at once gave signs of intense
disgust and indignation at the presence
of the interoper. He looked at Joe,
looked at the pew, scowlcd lnagnificently,
and finally, after fumbling through his
pockets some time, drew forth q card and
wrote on it with pencil: "This is my
seat, Sir!" and, with an air Of the lottiest
contempt, tossed it over to joe, who took
it up; read it with lamb,li meekness
peculiar to himself, and then, with the
most delightful coolhess, wrote in reply:
LISA very good seat! What rent do
you pay 2" and tossed the card back to
is owner. The latter took it, looked at
it with the most profound astonishment
minute or two, and then broad grin
overspread his countenance. lie evl.
IDENTIFY enjoyed the sublime brass and
GOODNESS of his new acquaintance, and
when service was over be approached
Joe, aooligized for his rudeness, invited
him to his house, gave him the best he
had, and treated him with the utmost re.
pect and consideration during his so]ourn
in the city.
TIMELY FLArrrRr.-A gentleman was
asked by Mrs. Wellington, what difference
there was between her and her watch;
20 which he instantly replied, " Your
watch, madam, makes US remember the
hours. and you make US forget them.'
4 New WAY OF GETTING A DRINK.-
4 good Joke is told on one of our. clever
saloon keepers, which is too full of genu-
ine humor, under pressing circumstan-
ces,'' to be lost:
4 short time ago representative of
the Green Isle stepped into the saloon Of
the person above alluded to, and with a
countenance full of inquiry, said -
"An' have you got any good rye whls-
ky7" ;,
"Yes, very good the best in town,"
said the saloon man.
'"An' have you got any half.pint bot
ties, my man 2"
"Yes,' was the reply.
can will you please fill one with
your best rye whisky. for me?"
"Of course said the obliging dealer;
md after reaching for the required flask,
| and spending full half hour cleaning it,
repaired to the cellar, drew half a pint of
his Bourbon, and presented it to the gen.
tleman in waiting.
Pat took the bottle, raised it to his
lips, swallowed at least half of its con-
tents, and then, after making the appro.
| priato f:,co ovorit, said in n very conf
Dental tone:
"Will you please to bit this to ore
side till call for t?"
"The saloon keeper, smelling large
sized rat trap full of small MICE" care.
fully slowed away the said halfflled bot
tie. The fellow never called for it, but
took this novel way of obtaining drink,
pAY1sc ISrEREsT.-A good story is
;old of rather verdant agricultural la
borer, who having by hook and by crook
scraped together fifty dollars, took it to
his employer with request to take charge
of it for him. A year after, the laborer
went to another friend to know what
would be the interest on it. He was told
three dollars. "Well," said he, | wish
you would lend inc three dollars for a
day or two. My boss has been keeping
fifty dollars for me wear, and | want
TO pay him the interest for it?"
A certain minister had promised lit
tie boy of his that he should accompany
him to church the following Sabbath
The little fellow, although not quite four
years old, was still old enough to remem'
oer the promise. But when church time
came it happened that he was fast asleep
and his parents went away leaving him
IN bed.-Some time after he awoke, and
calling to his mind the promise given him
he hurried down stairs only to find his
father and mother gone. Determined
not to be frustrated in this manner, he
made his way into the street, and crossing
TO where the church stood, entered the
opened door. The minister at thar mo.
ment was commencing his sermon. Fix
ing his eyes upon his father, the little fel-
low waddled up the aisle, in his night
clothes, until directly opposite the pulpit
when he halted, and looking up at him,
called ont 81 dcs you fordot me-"
ADVANTAGES OF LArIS-A very good
member of the General Assembly ol
Rhode Island once moved to translate all
the Latin phrases in the statute so that
the common people could understand
them. The exquisite folly of such q
measure was by no means obvious to the
great body of the Assembly. 1t was
quite as likely to pass as not. A good
solid -gument against it would probably
have carried it through. The late Mr..
! Opdike took the ground that it was no