Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1867-10-23
4 Hard Shall Serman.

"'''S, Oe"0'~ lucy "aS u'I DsUV
Corpuses."
My friends and hearers, will preach
onto you this day-win and weather per-
mittin-fom the thirty.seyingth chapter
Nv lsaisy, thirty.sixth verse, And the
destroying angel smote in the camp,uv the
Syrecians a hundred and forescore and
Eve thousand merl-ah And aDhen they
reg up early an tie morning, behold they
acos all dead corpuses :" An thus it is, my
unconyerted trends and hearers that the
destroying angel stalks around with his
meat axe, ready to sen US to the boneyard
before we kin set down to breakfast-ah.
An it is said, my frens, that roses are red
aud violets are blue-ah, ba. it's no use of
trying to honey fuggle round the angel
Gabriel when he toots his horn for you to
tuck 20 tails aad get under dirt-ah.
"An when they riz up early in the
morning, behold they was all dead cor
puses."
My wre;chel brethrins and sistring, es
was riding along the road one day,
seen II man q settin on the top wv his
frEre with dorble-barrel shot gun on
his lap.ah, anl a swet,in an swettin and
4 !annn nv hiSself with a noble straw hat,
aad y c'lssin Nv the !orthe Of July, an
North Ame:iky, an the Constitution, an
the Supreme Court, an the bird uv liberty,
and the President NY the United Statesa ah,
and when | hcarn that man cussin an seen
that big shot gun, thinks to myself, in
the words of the tex-ah:
And when they riz up early in the
morning, behold they was all dead cor
pases.
sn tole old Roam two wo, and sez I,
my ungodly fren, if you swear in that air
way you will forever and eternally ruinate
70 immortal soul-ah, and never get nib
bic when you go fshin-ah y and SCI he,
You so too hell, you damd old missha
pen, mis-begotten. mistake oy crcaton.ah;
ct' you had to git the grass out Nv cot
ting crap with free niggers, you'd git upon
n stump and cuss yourself ont NV yo
dam'd old yaller hide, an go to he'll for yo
health,-ah." And sez |, "My erin fren,
it cuts me to the marrer to see you strug.
glin in the bondage ov sin-ah." An sez
he, 4" My punkin faced customer, eff you
kin cline that air tall red oak tree thar
and see anything in this here miserable
Ian but bonding and crab grass, you kin
take my ole hat fer henness.ah An
SCI |, "My hard swearin fren, am afeared
you will never register yo name in the
book Nv eternal life,ah" An sez he, 81
went to town lass Monday to register an
! couldn't git sight Nv the book for the
dam greasy niggers-ah. "Oh. mistaken
human" seq |, II trimble fur 20 future,
fur you arc on the road Il leadin too per
ditionah." An sez he, "You are dam'd
ole liar, for I'm on the road leadin to
Benton-ah." heaved . groan, my hearers,
an sez |,
San when they riz up early in the
mornin, behold they was all dead corpuses."
An sez he, "Let EN- riz an be dan'd to
EN- allah" "Oh, my suferin feller cree
.ur," sez |. "ef you would but sue fur
grace you might cum to jine that heaven
ly quire, an be mencipated frum the
shackles Nv sin.ah." An he cooked up
his gun an sez he, 81 had twenty-six like
ly niggers rnancipated on my hans wonst,
I'm eli you open 20 jaw bout Emancipation
to me agin I'll make buzzard vittles out
Nv 20 dam'd ole swiveled up carkass befo
hell could cripple NV gnat.ah." My
constant frens and hearers, when seen
th,t wicked man cockin NV his gun.ah,
| begun to feel exceeding jubous, an the
words NV the tex smoted upon my
ear-ah-
"And when they riz up early in
the mornin, behold they was all dead
corpuses."
"But, my Christian hearers, felt tcalled
upon to try my han one more time on
this objurit man-ah; an sez |, "My bias,
phemous fren, you are continually an for
ever dam'd ah, eff you don't immejitly git
down ofner that air fence-ah, and 90 to
some sequestered spot an pray fur your
souls redemption-ah." And he jumped
down ofner of the fence shore enuf, but
he didn't go to no sequestered spot-ah
but, my unconscious hearers, he stuck
that big ole double. barrel shotgun close
up to my reverend head-ah, and sez he,
"I've hearn sequester was the next
thing to confscator, and eff that's yo
business in this here settlement, you had
better begin to grow nifty dam small and
beautifully less-ah." An, my hearers, it
looked to me as eta drove Nv mules could
q trotted down the barrels wv that air ole
an put spurs to ole Roam,
an galluped through the wilderness fur
fo an twenty shours-ah; an thinks |, my
hearers, eff that air man don't pull up |
soon, he'll git to the end Nv his rope,ah.
"And when they riz up early in
The mornin, behold they were all dead
And sure enuf, my patient hearers, in
about three days, that proffanated man
was TUX up by the freedman's buro and
Tried by millingtary commission, an hung
'ur KILN Nv anigger-ah; an, my lisnen
rrens and hearers, when seen him a
,tandin on the great emensity NV space an
kickin at the forth district, sez too my.
self, in the Ianguig Nv the inspired him
ster.ah:
Zone more sinner is dead and gone,
silver spade to dig his grave,
A golden chain to let him down,
A buglo horn to blow on-ah."
"An whey they riz up early in the
nornin, behold, too, they was all dead
Little Alice found out an ingenious way
# getting to bed in hurry. The crib |
:, ,rhinh che slant was so low that hu ,