The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1867-01-15
cation, Agritultlre, Warhds, 9nnseaents IL.
NUMBER is

1t is singular coincidence that Major
General Grant, q Scotch officer ii The
British army, in 1778, defeated General
Lee. in command Of Tie american. for.
ces in New Jersey, and was Afterwards
promoted to the rank of Lieutenant Geu-
eral, and subsequently died every DID,
at his seatssat Ballendellock, Scotland, in
1906.
Lord Byron, in reference to.a lady
he thought i'll of writes: "LadJ-------
has been dangerously Ill; butt mag con.
sole you to learn-thas she is dangerously
we'll again.
Prentice says great many Of his old
Southern friends are going North. They
feel curiosity to see what on earth
whipped them so.
A clergyman, somewhere in the be.
Inighted region called down East, y ask.
ed woman whom be had babtised, how
she felt in her mindl and was considers.
bly, surprised to hear her answer warmly,
"Bully."
The question, "Why do printers not
succeed as well as brewers?" was answer
ed thus. Because printers work for the
head, brewers work for the stomach; and
where twenty have stomsches only one
has brains" IL
The reason why women so seldom
stammer is because they talk so fast
stammer has no chance to get in. Peo-
pie stutter because they hesitate But
who ever knew woman to hesitate about
anything.
"Sarah, !" said young man. the other
day, "Why don't you wear ear rings2"--
because I havn't had my ears pierced"
81 will bore them for you." "Thank
you you have done that enough"
A different lover going to the father
of his "gall'' to ask the old mans per.
mission to wed her, found him working
alone in the middle Of a ten-acre field.
and asked him to step aside, as he had
something particular for bis private
ear.
A clock is said to have the least self
esteem Of any article of manufacture, a.
it is constantly running itself down and
holding its hands before its face, however
good Its works.
| There is an individual in the market,
"doing business" who is down on custc.
mers who don't speak proper. asu
What's eggs, this morning. says 4
customer. 90
eggs, of course, " says the dealer. 81
II mean-how do they go" 5Eeasia
"Gol--where9" s si4sss
"Sho-I" says the customer, getting up
his fury, "what for eggs?" s4.,.rS.
"Money, money, sirl or good endorsed
creditl' says the dealer.
"Don't you understand the English
languageg" says the customer, ss4;,.
s'Not as you mix it and mangle It, I
don'tp responded the egg merchant. g
"What-is-the--price- per- .dosenA-
for-your--eggs2" 4ssas aissog
"Ahl now you talk, " says the dealer.
"Sixteen cents per dozen is the price, ,sirr'
They traded. = s's ssf sssaH
! Do what you should do,snd you vii .Ss
what You should be.
/ Stranger-1Haye you q good strong
porter about the house9"
| Clerk (eagerly)-aYes; We have ths
strongest one about the place" 1s
I Stranger--'sIs he intelligent II
| Clerk-aOh, yes sir, quite intelligent
for porter, We think stranger"
Stranger-oOn point more. Do you
consider him fearless-that is, bold and
courageous?" ss sasit1as's
i Clerk-"As for that matter.I know be
dis; he would not be, afraid Of the devil
| himself"
| Stranger-"Now Mr.. Clerk, if your
porter is intelligent enough to 6nd room
No. III, fearless enough to enter, and
strong enough to get my trunk away
/ from the bed-5ugs, | woald ike to have
him bring it down.
!, Dryden was SO bound up in his books
that his wife one day exclaimed: II wish
were book thatI might always be ii
, your soclety'' ss1 with you were an al.
minac,so / could change you every year.
replied he. as M isiz sfsi .
Louis XIV, playing ar Backgammon
had doubtful throw A dispute arose
and the surrounding courtiers all remain
. ed silent. The Count de Grammon, hap
pening to come in that instant, ssDecid
: the matter, !" said the King. .Sire, 'sai,
! the Count, your Msjestyis is in thewrong,'
"How can you thus decide" asked tn
: King, ''without knowing the question?
D Because, said the Count, "had the mat
e ter been doubtful, all these gentlemen
e presentvould have given. it ryour Maj
|, esty." - s. .si
II "You dentist, Bob? / did not kpo,
: you were in that trade" 1"Yes,n sal,
!, Bob, II follow no other business hut Sc.
! ting taoth--iu beef, potatoes, basad, , ant
sich like s tssg $.
n A meeting has been held in Philadel
phia to devise means by which Congress
could be prevailed upon TO reduce or en-
ltirely oblitera.e the internal revenue ta
lof five per cent all domestic manafac
lures. ysa aab2ds i
e DR.. Franklin recommends young ma
in the choice Of wife, to sslec. her fror
l. a bunch, giving as reason that -whe
u there are many daughters, they imprev
each other, and from emulation acquir
q p,nrn nnnn,n IL hn,anfr nr,d i-nnuu :, a.