The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1867-08-28

impossible to reply to all by return. He as A.;
sures them, however, that each client snail
receive due attention IN rotation.
In fortnight was inundated with
letters. They came from all parts OF
the kingdom. Many of them were
stamped with cornets, crests, and
monograms, that surprised me, though
l had made such proficiency in the
study of such devices on spoons, in
byRoue years. MY friend the porter
brought the letters to my lodgings
every morning and evening, on pair
of hand-trucks, until in all had re-
ceiYed twelve thousand four hundred
and seyenty-oue. Then Messrs. Dan
ton and Birch had their attention direc-
ted TO the fact of their house being
used as my address. They surprised
their porter in the act of running" a
cargo OF my letters; him they discharg-
ed; the letters they contiscated- 1t
grieves me to reflect on the melancholy
fate OF the porter, likewise on the num-
ber of postage stamps diverted from
their proper channel. II is fair to say,
though, that believe Messrs. DAnton
and Birch relIgiously returned every
postage stamp that fellinto their hands.
This is highly satisfactory to mind.
ISe. Even / could have done no
more.
You will very likely think that 1lOD
stopped the correspondence Not
quite correct, even now. Honesty is
ever the best policy. First i took the
precaution OF moving my letters, my
valuable stamps, and my valuable self
into the country. Then, from my rural
retreat, l proceed TO impart TO my
twelve thousand four hundred and sew
enty-one constituents, the grand area
mum and mystery of 1.-THE Good thing"
Although at n tremendous sacrifice of
stamps, held myself pledged to reply
to each correspondent, as an honorable
and a professional man.
That my privacy might not be dis
turbed by disagreeable inquiries, took
tie precaution to forward my letters
twice a week to London, in a bale, to
my friend the pawnbroker. for the
sake Of the London post He
posted them for me at the "GeraN."
II took exactly month TO complete
my extensive correspondence. No
postage stamps were returned this time;
but each letter contained the following
piece of advice, neatly inscribed on the
my opinion 1t is a precept more priceiul
than postage stamps, and shoHld be
written in letters OF gold):
To inQuIIers for the Good Thing: See Luke <,
"a. Go and do likewise.
With "A view to attract into the paths
of honesty and virtue those of my mis-
guided brethren still pursuing the
ulknlJ OCtu PhAAou u
vulgar robbery, subjoin my balance
sheet, which cannot TAIL to prove an in
centive to the practice of honest labor
for daily bread. In proof of its having
taught me the beauties of rectitude, L
wish to call attention to one item it con-
tains. j refer to income tax. My re-
tiring and gentle nature could not
brook "return," to undergo the scru-
tiny of a curious surveyor; buta recent
number of the Times contains the fol-
lowing notification: "The Chancellor of
the Exchequer begs to acknowledge the
receipt OF the second half of IA Bank OF
England note for ten pounds, on ac-
of income tax; from NJ. ESQ. Need 1
add that NJ. stands for MeP
] wish to add general moral.
To steal in the lump from any one
person is disrepuiable and foolish, be-
sides rendering you amenable to the
law; but so TO conduct your negotia-
tions AS to distribute a given loss (yOIT
profi) among the largest possible body
of constituents, is the true theory of
commercial prosperity.