Litchfield enquirer., 1867-05-02
From CasseTs (Lmdon) F'amily Poper.. THE. FIRST LOVE AND THE LAST.


 l. is an old story am about to tell tha story, which thank Heaven people neve tire of listening to, any more than we do C seeing the buds swell and the leaves unfold ing, and the world made young again b the coming of srring-the story, to whlc as we listen, our own youth comes back and once more the flowers bloom, and tn skies are blue, and our hearts are beat1n joyously, and it is May.
 I am not young now, neither IS the da on which I am soberly writing this little re cord of long past period, balmy one o spring, or anything like it; and yet Ma. comes freshly back to me as l recall tha day of which am going to speak.
 A lark was singing far up ln the blu sky, 8 few sheep were pasturing ln tn green distance, and tall figure dressed il gray, with gun on his arm, and one or tw' dogs frisking around 1t, was coming leis urely along the sea wall. had been full, intent but the minute before upon th sketch of an old boat was making bu now felt but the beating of my heart, ane saw nothing but Mark Sutherland coming leisllrely along the sea wall, with his dog playing around him.
 The little picture was never finished, fo at the instant that I became conscious o the advancing figure, dropped my brush and hopelessly ruined my distance by great smear of vandyke brown. It was ney CT finished, no-but I have it yet, and mean 1t shall be laid beside me in m, coffin.
 He was long way off when I first saw him and yet it seemed almost the next in stant that he was standing beside me speak ing. My heart had not left off beating anG I could feel the color hot in my face as i looked up, but my fiery little terrier tool exception to his dogs, and flew at then with tumultuous disaploroyal, taking his at tention off me for the moment. When this little fracas was quieted, he put his gun on the bank, made his retriev CTS lie beside it, and sat down himself by me.
 "Have you had good sport p I asked, by way of saying something-anything.
 "No," he answered, but don't com plain. I didn't expect any, came out here because thought I should see you and wanted to tell you a piece of news and ask you question: "News is precious commodity. indeed in these wilds but please remember my Scotch blood, in expecting an answer te my question:
 He did not seem to be attending to what I said he had taken up one of my sable brushes and was absently playing with it but he threw 1t down the next minute, anC said softly:
 "Hester, havegot an appointment thai l have been trying for, and I shall leave for India next month-that's my news"
 My heart that had been beating so wildly seemed to stand suddenly still, and droI down-down. The water and the greer marsh rocked, blended hazily into each oth CT, and the sky, and then voice that sound ed dim and far of, but was my own, too said, "It is good news I suppose"
 "Good news Well yes, I hope so." He stopped minute here. His voice was very deep one, for he was large i broad chested man but when he spoke again it had soft undertone in it tha used to ring in my ears afterwards-it doe: now.
 "I thought it good news this morning for without it I could not think of a wife i That troubled me little enough until latel, till knew you, Hester. My dear thinl you have guessed my question:"
 Guessed it Ay yes. But my face wa down upon my hands he could not hea
  he went on gently, pitilessly- 'But I shall not get an answer to it SO Will you go with me to India 2" I did not answer-I could not. An, thost who have had deliberation to kill their ow1 happiness, to raise up themselves the bar rier that shuts them out of hope, and love and life, will know how hard 1t is-will the1 pity me.
 "Will you be my wife and go with me t, India ?"
 ''I cannot" And no wonder that ht made sudden movement of surprise, for myself wondered to hear the hoarse passio1 of my own voice.
 "You cannot What fool have beer then, I hoped-I hoped-Hester, is it pos sible that you have not known what I hay, been thinking of all this time ?'' Knowing what he had been thinking about An, the light and life, and joy o those moments when I had dared to hop that did. An the anguish of feeling nov that they had been in vain "Look at me, Hester, don't think un derstand you-you, my dear,'' he said pa tiently and gently. You say you canno be my wife, and you tell me you canno be my wife, and yet tell me you cannot lov, me and am answered at once" He put his arm over my shoulder as leaned forward with my face buried in m, lap, and whispered II think you don't love me, Hester" "Oh, I do, Mark, I do !" cried, iftin' my head; "but I cannot marry you. shall have to give you up'
 "Give me up, my dear love p and h. held me closer "I cannot 90 to India"
 "Why not ?' and he looked half amazed half amused
 could not bear the glance of his kin, dark eyes, shrank away from his arm an, said:
 "I cannot leave Miny''
 To our own thinking, I had pronounce, our doom now but Mark Sutherland coul, laugh, and said:
 Well, then, you shall not; Miss Mill shall go too."
 "Ah ! if that could only be but Mill would die in India. We came home be cause the climate was killing her."
 "And you will not leave her ?''
 "Ipromised mamma before she died. tba I never would that if married it sioni not separate us; that my home should b Milly's till she did not need it." answered faltering under something in the look of hi face that was new to me. Up to this time I had been thinking of myself. now T wa p6o5 fbof T 1voc w"