Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-11-07
Dead Broke.
BY THE "FAT CONTRIBUTOR"

We found q man seated on
curb stone near the post Office,
last night, muttering to himself
apparently, as there was no one
else to mutter to. We felt con-
strained to ask him what he was
doing.
''Haint dom nothin'," was the
reply.
"Where do you belong?"
"Don't b'long nowhere, and no.
where don't belong to me?"
"Who are your"
"I'm Broke"
"Well, suppose you are broke,
you've got a name, havn't you?-
What is it,"
81 tell we I'm Broke-Dead
Broke--that's my name, and
that's my natur'. My father was
Broke before me. IF he hadn't
been, / wouldn't be Broke now
at least, not SO bad. My mother
was a Peasely, but she waited
husband and she got Broke
that's my dad-and Broke got me.
Nv been Broke ever since"
For a few moments the unhap-
Ply D. Broke buried his face in his
hands, and seemed lost in the
most doleful reflections. Then
raising his head, he exclaimed
bitterly:
81 wish l had been born a
coltp
"Why do you wish you had
been bern a colt?"
because a colt amt broke un-
til he is two or three years DID,
| was Broke the moment / saw
the light, and l never got over it.
1t is hard to be broke SO young"
Glow did your parents come to
call you Dead Broker"
swell, ye see, as soon as | was
born something seemed to tell me
that Ihad got to be Broke allmy life
unless could get my name chang
ed by Act of Legislature, and
that, you know, would be an i'm
possibility"
"How an impossibility
care you such a bloekhead as
to suppose that a man can get
anything through the Legislature
when he is broke"
"You are right. Go on"
"When the conviction forced
itself upon my infant brain, con-
fused as twas by recent expert
ence, that / must be Broke all my
life, l felt that there was nothing
left to live for, and lost all con-
seriousness at once. Il have found
only part of it, He is dead!
cried my mother, wringing her
hands. yes grounded my father
dead Broker Alas! / rivived,
after a short timel But Dead
Broke became my name, and /
have been dead broke ever since.
My name has been fatal to me all
through life. The. smallest boy
in school always broke me in play
ing marbles. l broke more win
dows than any other boy in base
ball. always broke down at reel
tation, and had my head broke
every day by the school-master.
When left school l went to clerk
;tsfor Broker. One day there
.vonp>a heavy deficit in the &C
-s,snts. l was afarid he might
think | had something to do with
it, so II broke. They caught
me thsngh, and put me in jail;
but | b. ake out"
"0ut oSS jail?"
"No, DID it-5roke ont ,cith
the smdtt-pcN.
"What did .aste. do next?"
"After the ID disposed
of my case I VIE at leasll to go
into the brokerags'1e, 22HLagain."
elbow was that"
81 broke stone in tile penitentia- |
ry-dog on it! After I got out
i broke everything. i broke my
promise, broke the Sabbath, and
broke the pledge"
"Were you ever married?"
eyes, (sighing deeply,) matri-
mony broke me up worse than
anything else. My wife was a
regular ripper, She broke up
my furniture and the dishes, near
ly broke my back with flat-iron
and finally broke my heart" i
"By running away?" S
"No, indeed, by sticking to me-" a