The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1867-08-01
On his Travels, No. 8.
MISTER Ed :

MISTER ED ::
1t has been quite length of period since
l rote to you last, and l now resoom the quill
for the purpus Of informin your menny ank-
shus readers that my existence is still alive,
and that contnyoo inhabitant of this ter
restrial spear, WHARF expect to remain until
hav breathed my last breath and past into
that country from whose boorn nobody don't
come back. AS set here roominatin on these
melancholy subjects, my mind instinctively
goes back to my native home WHARF I was
born and first opened my eyes on this wicked
world and sent forth my first infantine foot Of
mizery. Sammy says hav menny ardent adj
mirers among your readers, which admirers
wood be delited to hav me rite my biografy
which I hav concluded to do, and I hav con-
cuded 20 begin sed biografy in this letter, and
continyoo it threw series of letters untilit is
done. rote my biografy a good many years
ago, before past threw college, and didn't
know much, and l will copy it jest as l rote
it then, poor spellin and ungrammatical mis-
takes and all, so that the young can see how
much improvement Ipurson can make Which
purson is industrious, and thay may ieet en-
couraged to persist and continyOo and put
fourth their energies, and strive until the god
dis Of victory shall place laurel reath on
their crowns. But to go back to the erly days
heretofore mentioned.
HIS ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS BIRTH:
I waz born before kan remember, and the
old foax didn't keep emmy akkount ov the per-
perticulers, so | am unable to Civ EN- myself.
However hav been informed that the whole
family waz lilly gratitude at the event and all
the nabers pronounced me to be the pertyest
baby ever seen; my mother behaved EN-, and
it pleazed her muchly, but hav reason to
think thay Tide. hav, before now dun the
same thing myself on a similar okkasion; most
foax do. In fact, it IL nothin unuzhual for
you deer reeder, to tell a mother that her dir
ty little lump ofugliness IL the sweetest cher
ub in all the world-and it IL rite you shood.
Some ioax think it IL rong to lie ever so little,
but in this kase it IL rite for it il alwaze best
ov evils to chews the least,-and you would
have to lie or fife. To fite il the biggest evil,
unless you are strongest.
HIS YOUTH.
Az grew older,it waz plane to be seen that
all the promises ov my infant days was goin
to be fulfilled and in most kases exseeded.
This waz particularly trew ov my feat and
noze. Az soon az l was big enuff waz sent
to skool, but went fishing most ov the time
and didn't lurn much. But when did 90, the
skool master, hoo had eye for buty, obzervin
the deformity ov my features, endevered to
| cfrptah INV 90 nm n O ci nd n
my noze. He alwaze worked at my left ear
1 spoze he thawt l at time enuf and per-
zume he intended to take the other when that
waz dun, but after he got my sed left ear brawt
owt to extent fully equal to my nose, and
twice az big az the other ear, he died. This
waz a CRATE misfortin for mater abhors vacu
UNI, and az the left side ov my he'd waz the
Ihevyest, OWN to the crater development ov
ear on that side, my noze had to turn to the
rite to fill the vacuum.
For this reazen l kant foller my nose when
1 walk out for if did shood aIwaze be goin
in a srke.
have alwaze bin sickly, espeshully sense
| waz q child-that IL reezen that l didn't go
to skool more-another reezen IL the fishin
waz good-and a third reezen IL, my father
told me wunst on a time to alwaze foller my
noze, and that alwaze led me to wun side ov
the skool house. When l waz young had the
meazles, mumps hoopin kauf, bee stings, scar
let feever and pizen ivy.
In my next l will continyoo this history, a
attentive perusal of which will prove CRATE
incentive to the young.
Yours Trooly,