Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1867-05-06
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All communications must be accompanied Dy tile nalea "
authors nne rejected cannot be
-, Popular IDEAs CONCERNING NEwsPA-
PERs.-The following SO nearly embodles the
numerous erroneous ideas that some persons
have taken up about newspapers that we nave
concluded to publish It. ,.., ..r.4 -,
The GAINESVILLE Gazette talks very senslbly,
upon this point and says there Is class or
we'll meaning hut thoushtless persons who re-
gard newspaper as a sort OF benevolent enter
nrise gotten up by some liberal minded gentle
man for the sole purpose of doing all the good
possible, ana who has selected the million
topgued press to accomplish it. They are the
regular poachers upon the press-men who
alWaps want their favors inserted gratuitlously,
and are always ready to inform the publisher
that he is engaged in publishing newspaper,
and ,hey are always sure TO have something Of
a business nature that they believe to be good
news which ought TO be given to the public at
once. One man has just patented new heat.
Ing apparatus that will save half the fuel now:
used, and Of course it will be great favor tGi
the poor if the editor will just tell the people,
free Of Charge where such apparatus can be.
bought B
A man engaged in the manufacture Of reap
ers, recently sent the editor communication
Of two columns solid matter, setting forth the
saving his machine would be to farmers over
fhe common reaper which he wished inserted
gratis, it would be helping the farmers, don't
YOU see? Then there are numberless organl-
cations and associations Of individuals that are
clamorous for free rides in the publishers
wagon. The different religious denominations
want all their notices Of meetings, conventions
and festivals published free: first, because
they are too poor 10 pay, and second, because
they are engaged in doing good and ii is the
business of the publishers to help on the nobe
work. Firemen get no pay for watching the
property of citizens, and must have their mott
ces Of elections. meetings, &c., given them pro
Ioao pullic0. The Temperance organizations
are busy in the noblest work that can engage
he effort Of mcrl--t that Of uplifting the fallen
and ruined of our race!
John Doe takes weekly paper for which he
pays three dollars year and gets live dollars
worth of reading. His wife dies and he asks the
editor to print an obituary notice that costs 1t
least two dollars To get it put in type. John
might as consistently ask the undertaken who
furnished the coffin Tor his poor vile to throw
in a small one for his youngest child, simply
because he vas patron OF his, as to-. ask such
fayors of a newspaper without pay. "A mean
man il nominated for office out West some
times. and he expects the editor to put on the
best possible face on his fitness tor the position,
whitewash his character, print hls tickets and
vote them too, all for The good OF the cause and
success Of correct principles.
We beg all whom it may concern to remcm-
ber that no good newspaper can be made with
out it has the whole time and Industry OF those
engaged on it, and its expenses are compara-
lively larger in proportion its gross receipts
Than almost any other sort, of business. LII
If
facilities for getting your business before the
public and increasing your trade, pay tor THAT.
A SWEET JOKE UPON A DRUGGIST. The
following neat stroke OF business deserves men
t;on, on account Of the grand simplicity OF the
means set in action The scene is ina drug
glst's shop at Foggia, in the Neapolltan pro
. vince of Capitana,a; ; time, night, the druggist
having lust lighted q handsome silver lamp,
the admiration and envy of the neigh oorhood.
A man enters, holding his hat. IN his hand.
"Alr Druggist, will you please to give me
stranger "a hatful Of syrup! whatdo you
mean?'' cries the druggist, opening his eyes.
'.Do not mortify me by a refusal, it IS bet
with friend; SO just ill up my hat and tell
me what is to pay" (an Italian says, ''How
much spend. ~ The druggist was merry
fellow. the conceit pleased him, and 50 he
brought a big ballied flask, full up to the neck
with svrup, which was duly transferred to the
customers wide awake. s'Ecco serrito, : said
the druggist. Scarcely were the words out OF
his mouth, when the wlde-awake was on his
head, in a twinkling The lamp was blown out
and carried away While the poor druggist,
helpless and immovable, Stood like the Image
Of some river god with the clammy oo2e
trickling from him on every side.
EXCAVATIONS AT PoaIpEn. correspond
ent, writing from Naples, April I'd, says: "On
3 last Friday there was an excavation In the pre-
sence of the Minister Of the Royal Household,
when wonderful discovery was made. Ii was
kitchen that was disinterred ,and on one OF the
tornellt-smal square holes or fire places, such
as are in use in the present day, and are fed
with charcoal-was found q copper vessel,
supported by tripod. The vessel orsaueepan
was herm atically closed, and incrusted all over
with hpi7h;, so that it required considerable
force to open it. But how great was the sur
nrise Of those present to find that it was nearly
fnIl of wafer! The interior of the vessel pre-
sfnted no signs of oxidation, SO that no one
hesitated TO taste the water, when 1t was found
perfectly sweet and good. Pompell, then, which
has enriched us, after a lapse OF nearly tWe
thousand years, with jewels and paintings and
sculptured marbles, which has, also, supplied
our tables with bread and honey, eggs and tlgS
and variety Of other luxuries, has now slack
ed our thirst with water deposited in vase SC
far back as the. rcigh Of Titus, and by one o.
the victims, perhaps, of the fires of Nesuvius.
A GOOD STORY is told of the late Rev. VIM.
Thorpe, of Bristol, England. Mr.. Thorpe was
so fat, that on one occasion, when about tc
take part 10 an ordination service, it was found
that fhe nulDit was too narrow TO admit hin, ir
tile ordinary way, and he had to be assisted
over tho side into his seat. He then rose to
i. deliver his address. 1t was on The Import
ance Of a Right Introduction into the Chris
tian Ministry, and be founded his discours,
on the parable in which it is declared that ''h,
that entereth in by the door is the shepherd o
aG shesp .g H mhs .; ,atb thief % and robber '