The native Virginian. [volume] (Orange Court House, Va.) 1867-187?, 1867-11-29
afit and MnNnt.

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-" Can't you trust me, Mr.. Good
win, for little meat this morning ?"-
mo, you owe me for that already on
your bones"
"A Dutch woman desired to adj
vertise her pony which had s'losht her.
self, nit a tail frisky yer mooch, and
strike yer hard nit his behind fists
a celebrated Irish physician,
speaking of the physical degeneracy of
modern women, says we must take good
care Of our grandmothers, for we Shall
never get any more.
- Mr.. Henry Champion deming
lately gave to Providence, II. l., milf
tsry organization an autograph LETTER
of General fsrae, Putnam:
'scAMP AT PROSPECT HILL
NSir Pleas to delivor the Barron hearof
2Tons of Bread to some rod Islanders
as they came from rOXbary yesterday
and nothing to eat. ISRAEL PUTNAM
- A "hoss" doctor gives the follow
ing recipe!
FOR A SIX Hoss. .
take 5 sents wurth ruberb,
2 sents wurth calomey,
sents wurth sulfur,
give the boss oncet day, when the
boss gifts fisicked hold up on the me-
dason.
- In Western Sabbath school a
boy was asked to give an account of
Moses. "Moses," said he, awas born
OH the banks of the Nile in basket
AS the infant lay in the basket, con-
cealed in the bushes, huge crockodile
came swimming along, and approach
IL. Il.
persuadest me to be a Christian. >
Whereupon the infant stretched out his
little arm toward the crocodile, and
said :--"Verily, thou art the man."
A Brooklyn Presbyterian, who
has great faith IN catechism, and teaches
it with a pertinacity that would chal-
lenge the admiration of a Luther or
Calvin, was putting the youngest of
four througha course one day, when the
question came up:
tsWho tempted Eve?"
The little fellow, after few moments
thought, with an air of confidence ex-
claimed:
uit's the gentleman who lives in hell +,
I've forgotten his name.''
- Little Alice found out an ingen-
ious way of getting to bed in hurry.
The crib in which she slept was so low
that by placing one foot on the inside,
and taking hold of the post, she could
easily spring in.
one evening. "Do you know how 1
ret to bed so ouickPn aNo," was
the feply. "Well,' she said in great
glee, III step one foot over the CRIB,
then say rats, and scare myself right
in.''
Mrs: Jemina Jipson never could
go to bed without first looking under
meath to see if somebody was not stow
ed away there, but her search had been
bootless. AT last one night she spied
Cor thought she did, which is all the
same) the long-looked-for boots and
legs.
There's man under the bed!"
ais there?" coolly drawled the hus-
band. "Well, I'm glad you have found
him, my dear, for you've been looking
for him for the last twenty years.
60 A very worthy fisherman by the
name of Grizzle, was drowned some
time since, and all search, for his body
proved lAnavailing. After it had been
In the water for Some months, however,
1t was discovered floating on the sur
face, and taken to the shore ,whereupon
Mr.. Smith was dispatched to convey
the intelligence to the much afflicted
widow.
swell, Mrs. Grizzle, we have found
Mr. Grizzlies body"
"You don't say sol"
eyes we have-the jury has sot on it,
and found it full of cells -
"You don't say that Mr.. Grizzlies
body is full of eels?"
eyes it is, and we want to know what
you will have done with it?"
"Why, how many cells do you think
there is in him 2"
"Why, about bushel.'
"Well, then, l think you had better
send the eels up to the house, and set
him again."