The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1867-01-21
On tho Proper Use Of Grnndfathcrs.
from the 'rNorthern Lights."l

rFrom the "Northern Lights."l
If people without grandfathers are in need
of any particular solace, they may find if in
the fact that those cumbrous contingencies of
existence cannot be continually stuck in their
faces. A wise man has remarked, that the
moderus are pign les standing upon the shoul-
ders of giants. He would have been wiser
still, had he observed how frequently the gi-
ants change places with the pi mics, and ride
them TO deaGh like Old Men OF The Sea- Ii
at sixteen, have the dyspepsia and tenden-
cy TO reflect on the problems of my being,
am begged 10 notice thai, at corresponding
period, Old Jones, OF the alternate generation,
was gambling DER the dewy meads, glee-
some boy. If my baby cries and is puny at
teething-time, the oracles, with an lntuiGive
perception how my grandfather behaved
hundred years before they were born, tell me
it was not so in his day; that heaven lay
about him in his infancy; but that none OF
the Article exists either in that loose condition
or otherwise tor the immature human animal
who breaks out OF darkness and mystery INTO
this day of cummings. Ii the tremendous
pace at which the world is going knocks me
up at forty, and compeis me 10 keep my stall
for a wear of vaIetudinartanism, am asked to
remember what hale old fellow the same in
evitable ancestor was at ninety; am mum
dated with his eXuberance of spirits, over
whelmed with the statistics of his teeth; and
invited in the minds eye lin my own, too, If
/ know myself J to take six-mie walks with
him before breakfast unassisted by cane.
1t is not a pleasant state of mind to be dis
gusted with ones foreiathers, who would,
probably, have been very jolly fellows to know
and not the least in the world like the people
who are all the time boring us about the NJ
II there is truth in spiritualism, a delegation
from those fine old boys will, some of these
days, take advantage OF sitting, and rap out
an indignant disclaimer OF the bosh that Is
talked IN their name. Ifmy grandfather was
not much more unpleasant person than my
self, he would scorn to be made boguey OF
for the annoyance Of his own flesh and blood
Any man OF well-reguiated mind must prefer
utter oblivion among his descendants to such
perpetuation as that OF MIR. Wilter.
Your grandpapa," retorlei Mrs. Wilfer,
with an AWFUL look, and in an AWFUL Tone
"was what l describe him to have been, and
would have struck any of his grandchildren
to the earth VINO presumed to question it."
If our ancestors could return to the earth,
Ii is little likely that their first inclination
would be to goody themselves over the excel
lence o. their own period, or pull faces at the
degeneracy Of ours. SleeperS In lll-ventiiated,
or rather entirely nonv ventilated apartments,
eaters OF inordinate late suppers, nve-botlle
men. and for the most part wearers of sadly
unpnilosophical raimenl, those sturdy old fox
hunters would acknowledge l. just cause tor
astonIshmenG that their cnndren have any con-
stituuons at ALL Little motive for set-iauda-
ton would they ind in the fact, that, alter
drawing out their account with Nature to the
last dime, they mad taken respectable first
cabin passage TO the Infinite Bouiogne just
before the great Teller said "No tunds," and
showed bacK tnelr cheeks through the window,
leaving TO taeir children the heritage OF spot
les name and the declaration OF physiological
bankruptcy.
Nor woaid they content themselves, / fancy,
with the negative ground of mere humilItv.
TDey wouIu nave something very decided to
say 10 the Wiseacres, who taunt our wives in
the agony OF uic-dolourex with the statement
that tner erandmothers knew nothing of neu-
raIgia. NO. these generous ancents would
retort, that Is the residuary legacy OF gen.
Grafton 10 whom we left nervous system OF
worn-out fiddle strings" To such as talk of
that woiul novelty diphtheria as crime OF the
present age, they would point out the impossl-
bility of lace S throat descending to it with
out tenderness, races blood flowing to it
without taiut, rom ancestors who swaddled
tneu necEs lii tatnoms OF cravat, and despised
the question OF sewage. When had the govt,
and could not stand up for myself those brave
rieittes moustaches would stand up for me- =
"Many fine old bin of our port would they
excEalln, mas been emptied down through the
seCns into those innocent toes of thine. mind
me how smacked my lips over that very bot
tie whose broken glass now grinds around,
red-not, in the articulation of thy metatarsai
phaIanges. Dancing at thy fair great-grand-
mothers wedding, siaked the THIRST Of many
vigorous sarabands in that identical ruby nee
tar, which, turned by the alchemy Of genera
tions into acid blood, now through thy great
toe distils In gouts OF fiery torture. L danced
thou, poor cero-natus, dancest not, but dost
pay tue piper"
Woman, religion, and the forefathers are all
the victims OF a false quality OF reverence.
The world has immemorially paid them IN the
coin OF ip-service fer the privilege OF using
their sacredness as a yoke. They are de-
frau ed OF their true power by the hands
that wait them hypocriticdl incense; bought
OIL the ground where their influence
might De precious and permanent, by the
compliment OF moment, or the ceremony of
day. We pick up the fan OF the first, and
shoulder her out OF her partnership in our Sc
rious business of living. We build temples
for the second. that she may not CAD about
among our shops or trouble the doors of our
houses. In the third we do superstltious
homage TO mere accident of time, and feel
free TO neglect the genial lesson OF humanity
which is eternal.
1t is impossible not to reverence our fore
idLlGTS-tlOSG BFduu Oiu IeIlOWS WHO, long De-
fore we rose, got up to build the tires, and
shovel the Sidewalks of the world. The
amount OF work which they did was immense;
great was their poking and their pushing;
their thraShin1 Of arms and their blowing.oi
fingers. If they sometimes made compro-
mise with their job; If they here and there
LETT the cutters uncleared, or heavy DRIFT to
thaw over under The sun of modern con-
science, aud flood our streets with revolution;
II they built some OF their fires with wet
wood, which unto this day smokes in the par
ors, or even the Inmost bed chambers Of man.
kind,--ieI us remember how frosty the dawn
was, how poorly made were the tools and NIT
tens OF the period. All honor to their work,
and the will with which they went at it! But
when we are asked to regret the rising OF the
sun; to despise time OF day when there are
no more fires to build, no more walks to
shovel; or if such anywhere remain, where
there are snow-ploughs and patent kindling
to use in their overwhelmingly no Ia No as
biz as Mr. Carlyle's and spelt with as big
capital.