Public ledger. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1865-1893, 1867-10-25

tally on the ned with MS copy ov hor.
rises plais until the book wuz mostly
wore out. gave him a pitiful look an
walked skornfnlly home. That same
hour / turned mi bac forever on the
| Klassics.
Mi farther mex sent NEE to skool to a
Mr.. Joans, a man Of frenzy hart and hi
attanements. AT Mr. Joans skool i
mastered highly polished and cultiva-
ted nollidge ov belletta. The way cum
to make a speciality on this topic is
werthy of notis. / wuz in a spellin
klass one da when Mr.. Joans Civ out the
word kaups to spell A chilled ov nature
at the he'd ov the klass speld it corps.
Another speld it corpz, and a borned
fool speld it chaups. wuz the only boy
that speld it kaups, aud ! went up to the
he'd ov the klass. 1t is said that the
feerce monstars ov the forest, when
wunce they have tasted human blud, ar
thurly for it all the balance of their lives.
| wuz affected the same way by mi first
success as spellist Arfter this / de-
voated all mi item to belletta.
My collidge coarse wuz probably as
remarkable as any other part Nv mi
career. After leeving Mr.. Joans ! de-
termined to 90 to Vail Collidge and
compleet mi trainin. l arrived there one
faul, with mi cloathes bag on mi bac,
cuvered with swet, and very tierd.
Fearin that | might parse for boi from
the rooral distric, | throo good deal Of
con6dents onto mi gate and counteneuts,
and walked in at the front do ov the first
bildin ] cum to sumwhat rapidly Meetin
a we'll dressed yung gentlemun at the do,
I sed to him in quick vols: us Mr..
Vail in, sir ?"
"Yes, sir" he sed politely, walk
this way if you pleeze.
He then leeded me up seven flights Of
steps, and going down to the end of a
long passidge, he nocked violently at a
door whegO a persun within said, in a
loud tonetU Cum in here" and he
went in.
"Mr. Vail" he says, "here is yung
man wants to see you"
"Thank you, Mr.. Tomsun," sails Vail,
shaking him by the han good yumeredly,
aud begged US be seeted. Then turnin
to me he sed, "Do you propose to enter
collidge2' says he.
"Yes, sui" l replied, "that is my de.
sire.
"WelI, sir, yes. lam glad to see you.
Perhaps you wood like to have rune,
and wash 20 hand befo you eat dinner,
and arrange you klasses."
told him | wood.
"Tomsun," he sails to the gentleman
that brot me up, be kline enuf to
assine this yung man to a rune" And
then turnin to me he says, "Mr. -,
what is your naim, sur p
Ward, replied; " "Artemus Ward.
Yes. Well, Mr. Ward, make yoselt
cumfutable ia yo rune, pleeze, until
about 70 o'clock this AFTERNOON. Then
yoo will be kauld to dinna, arter which
will assine yoo yo klasses, an 700 can
60 to work at wunce."
| thanked him, and then Mr.. Tomsun,
exchaingin pleasant smile with Mr..
Vail, led me off to rune in distant
portion NV the blding. Opinin the do
aud leedin me in, he sails: Here, trust,
you will fine everything convenient to
maik 700 cumfutabla. Hear is q sofa,
warter, and towels Hear is rAzer and
strop.. And hear, believe, is sum wine
and Sugars" He then bowed very 10
and withdroo.
Being very tired after long journey,
| wus glad enuf to reach this quiet and
cumfnrtable retreet So, pullin off my
boots and sox, and kote and vess, and
lain them aroun on different cheers,
took q shaiv and then a good wash. |
then drunk some wine and lit sigar,
and stretchin out onto mi bed, begun
to rehec on the value of lerRin an the
goodness of Mr.. Vail. Findin the wine
pretty good, put sevril bottles of it on
a cheer neer the bed, so / could get it
easy, and then drunk and smoaked at
mi lezure. Finally fell to sleep, and
arter a protracted KNAPP l rose, feeling
sum unsertainty of mind. If | recollec
arite, / was putin on clean shurt,
which, the rune being dark, had put
on upside down, and got mi arms in and
buttuned the riss bans without disooverin
mi errer, until notist the profushun of
shurt collier there was to that shurt, when
sum low purson rushed into mi rune and
begun to sware tiercoly.
Sir" said |, lookin at him fercely
also, "what means the intrusion. In
mi Stait gentleman nox at a do befo
he busts it open. Aghastl thou low
intruder Byall the gods, to wunst, hie
thee to thi den Lives there man, with
sole so ded -"
But takin me rooily by the throte, he
choked mi utterance, and in few mo.
ments / was hurried into the street.
Seem policeman, appealed to him for
redress YES" he said, you need
redressing. Cum down to the stashun
house and we viii redress you. You
need redressin evidently" My hart
sickened my brane was dizzy with
anger; this roothless villyan dragged me
OFF to the prison without letting me
eiust mi shurt where / passed the mite.
The next day | was taken to a big
bildin where | saw sum marble statues
aud sum painiins. 1t immedity oecurd
to me that / waz to maik mi fortune as a
exhibitor NV wax fggers and startling
curiosities, which changed my plans ac-
cerding
Yorz truly, ARTEMUs WARD.