Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-10-09
Lament of Rev. pIr. F. Squirrel.
REPORTED BY K.

s'.'zt1 REPORTED BY Xs
sIsi STARKvILLE, GA, May Is, 1867. :
In the year of grace 1S4S it became nee
essary for the Rev. Mr.. Squirrel to close
the spiritual eyes and preach the funeral
sermon of Ichabod Beggs, who had offici
ated as deacon of s.Monnt Ziern" from his
youth up. Whether the report that Dea-
con Beggs' death was superinduced by the
too copiOus imbibation of corn-essence, or
what other innocent accident, if any might
have hurried him 'sto that barn from
tchicI," &C., is certainly not now the busi-
ness of this reporter to inquire. He has
nothing to consider but the death and
funeral of. the good, pious deacon. The
former H. e., the death) he presents as an
fat acconpli, or, to speak in legal parlant e,
functus IN o1icio, and the latter ito wit, the
iuneral) as pendente. But the
FUNERAL.
And Annanias and Sophier they both
drapt down stone ded. Sich is my Kicker
lexion NV the words in the Skripter; fur
lef my Bible on Brother Spinner's counter,
and my remembry hain't nun Nv the hearth
est. Brethrin, l cum here to preech BROTH
er Beggses funeral sarmant; fur he's ded ;
and we all got to dy-the rich and the
: poor-ahi the larnt and theonlarnt-ahi the
hardshells and softshells, and them as hairi't
got no more shells no more'n my saddle
stirrups-ah And Annias and Sophier they
, both dropt down stone ded-ahl Yes
[hawktsho], when your own dyin tecks
plase you got to be right thar whar it's a
gwine on, and see it dun-ahi You can't
git no lief uv absence-ahl y
When deth calls you, you got to g'long,
and thar amt no use Nv putin on brakes
urspullin' agin the bit-ahl You can't ags-
kuse yurself by sayin' you've jest married
umurn, ur traded for track NV land, ur
bought q yoke Nv stears-ahl No, my sis
for WI IN
tux up yore close and wade into the river
nv deth like Brother Beggs has dun-ahl
Brother Beggs wus (hawk-sO) good
Chrlshtan man, and he died in the saryise
nv the Lord-leastwise, sich is my urpin-
ion; but that diddint hold his sperrit in this
yearthly tabernickle- ahl AID yander sets
his poor widder weepin' bekase he's gone,
and 1 no how she feels-ah? | no how it
was wi me and my old dumurn when we
only jest thought we had last our poor, deer,
darlln' little son Izik-ri-ah! The poor lit
tie creter had strooled- off, and we cuden't
Browns, where he was in the habits Nv
plain long wi the little niggers and things,
and we thought, may ybee we mont find him
thar ah, but we diddent find him thar, and
the rizen we diddent wus bekuse he svarnt
thar-ahI and then we TUX down the tother
eend uv,the rode sarched fur him round
bruther Spinner's orcherd, whar he sum
times went a plum-stelen-ah! But no,
Izich warn therr-ail. And then we hunted
in the field, what we call the wilderness
field. whar he sot his traps and his things
ah, and from thar we went to the hop-lot,
whar he wus in the habits NV plain long wi
his little, slick-taled poney colt give sew
enteen dollars and seventy-fivc cent fur
the Winter afore-ah; but no war we
diddent see no trax nur trases of the poor
little critter-ah. And us and our nabors
usrcbed and hunted all over the woods on
tWel me and the duinnrn we wus about to
give up the sarch and quit the drive-ah.
we thought our little darlin Izicku wus
ded-ah-destroye like Joziph by the wild
beasts OF the forest-ah. Oh, how bad we
felt a{crying) at the thouts of that sipera-
zion: fur what saith the Skripter? And
Annanias and Sophier they both drapt
stone ded d-ah-that siperation that nuthin
on this yuth cuddent onsiperation ah-ieas-