Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1867-01-09
A Political S0ttre.

rOuno tne cncie. Inc t8olc VI COutcu1e
will give the reader some notion Of what il
meant:
! |. The Main L,ne-The 'Umble
Individual A. }.
2. Branch Line No 1.-The Man
who runs the Machine w. Ii. s.
| 3. Branch Line No. 2-The Boy
at the Wigwam. Ii. j. r
4. Branch Line No. 3-Bendan-
| dyfernapja amin W oodbox Broth
ers b. Il F. W.
! 5. My Maiden Speech in Congress Hon. J. M.
+. Sermon at the opening OF the
Philadelphia Wigwam. A. s.
| We copy s'The Boy at the Wigwam,'
which our readers will find amusing.
THE BOY OF THE wIGwAM.
am the Boy of the Wigwam. am the
little Boy OF tue Wigwam. My parents calls
me Hanky Raymond, but always goes with
the Public by the name of the Boy. blacks
and ticks the boots, and blows the noses and
wipes away the Tears of the visitors L am d
! con ,ortonist am | amuses the fellers what
| comes here by turning of Dyself inside out
: and ou tside in kin stand on my head and
| heels at one aud the same time. The Deven-
port Brothers isn't patch to me. Wy, only
the other day performed trick which it
| mas parsly zed everybody with wonder.
| took a turecn of Treasury soup and held 1t
out at arms length, and at the same time
| repeatedly turned myself insite and out
| side of my roundabout without epllIlng a
| drop of the coup or damaging of myself a bit,
| or m akin the slightest wrinkle in my coat.
between us, had that eIe garment made
| very loose, and split under the sleeve so as to
| turn easy.) l am a very funny Teller, some
| times am The other day made a tableau
OF myself. You'd oughter a seen me. 1t was
! a very amusing thing. l was standin IN
| front Of the Wigwam a countin of the pennies
which had made By sellIn newspapers-for
| there is one paper which gets for nothln
and of viii ch sells several copies daily to
| feliars who write for it and Veteran greenles
as | was fayiD, was q countin of the
with my face to the Wigwam door SO that nc
other Boy shonid catch a sight of me and
| play grab, when who should l see comm ou'
of tn WIgwam but the great Weeper.
Boy" says he, N voice OF thunder
mixed with bIGters and gu ar. - look at them
boots | thought you cleaned them boots OF
this mornin - =" Yessir,'' says L, rollin my
tongue, for I knowed what war q comm
Yessr, 50 | DID, Vell,' says he, "now
you just git down and clean them yer boots
agin.' SO | just drops down and war bend
In over, wheI l heard step 1 knOwd very
well-a step behind me-and then l felt a
kick that l knowd still better. Old Thad
yer see, always wears square-tOed boots, and
he plants 'em firm. and for an old man he
do kick powerful strong. Now the Umble
indIvidooal ne pretenos not TO see old Thad
| lie smiles bandly at nothlnk all the while
only lookin' down occasionally and p'ntin
out with MS toe the pecoollar spots that need
ed extry touches. L didn's tuIn around; and
SO cd ihad he sent in couple of busters
that fairly looscned every hair IN my body.
Boy" ne yogled, " look at NY boots
! Now exercisin of the numerous double
facilities that Possesses, cast look back
ward at the brogans that was at this time a
playn' like the waikin' beam of Jerry boat.
! la an ipstan' perceived that somthiD mus be
did. You must remember that o.d Thad, h.
stood square behind NE plupgin away like
mad. " lthout stoppin the final polIshin on
the kips of the U mble individ, | sImoolta-
neous,y began operations on the gunooae OF
Tha1-cleanln both pair OF hoots at one and
the same time, What made this feat more
remarkable IS the fact that ola Tnad never
stopped his kickin' for a minnit .
Genl'men | thank you for the nickes.
and IN return | Will perform several OF my
most amoosIn tricks You see me hold my
self out az arms length by the slack OF the
1udt DOluln. IL Ooo'Oi
than TO sell the Times. You see me lookin
four ways at ouss That's one of my most
extraordinary tricks. VIII any genl pen be
% cd enough 10 kick me? Iliks to be kicked.
SO belp me Bob; like to be kicked. Ii hurts,
but ike j.. You psrceive geni'men that
kickIu doesn't affect me. ] makes no COM
plants. Even when L am kicked the worst
esI, kin smile and smile and be Little
Villain.
This way genl'men, to the paddock and
sectarial department. Here's where l writes
my letters and commoonicashuos- I'm very
literary boy. I've wrote good deal. I've
wrote good many letters-l wish could
get some OF 'em back. Tain't fair for one
Teller 10 get another feller's letters, and ma e
the other feller licks his boots for fear OF
havin' them docky ments exposed-taInt fair
Is 1t?
Gentlemen, make no complaints. l like
20 De kicked. But the gentl'man who Jst
now stabbed me with slch uncomon force
hadn't oughI TO put bradawls IN the pnts OF
his Doots-he hadn't.
Gent men I'm ~ fond of the theatre. l
| think Id BE- a good actor myself. Fact lf,
1 IN RELY heavy private iheatrIcsis. You
oughter tee me as Repenfant Honky 10 the
play of d" The Apos.ate, Or the Cuss OF eau
Gus"
Genlm 1 hope you Dot 0I5gusted with
me l hopes these noomerous kicks oie not
eigns of dissatIsfackshun Ii I'd known that
l would Il disguised you, genl men, would
n t done IL. Geni men, the material Boyancy
of my disposition may have LED me to be g.
free and coLtdn. GeLl men, credit such
overhowins to the sympathles OF yooth. In
90 any hing for you, gen men. 81 help me
Bob, hereafter l will do anything Tor any
booy. Gas l was a saying ike to be kick
ed On lot by cannon. | think that a kick
that makes you turn double somerset len !
accordin to the rules of the 2. B.. But gen.
iemeD, l must 90. | hopes | have not dis
gusted you. /" Ii I'D a known Id done It
wouidn'I done it, but how could | know
that would q done it when l didn't know
that could know that did know that
dlon'G know that | wou ldn : u done iS
Yes sir, GONNA SIT
President johnson and Secretary Seward
as was exceedingly proper for Democratic
politicians OF their complexion ATTENDED the
jackson dinner at Washington yesterday.
We have no report Of Johnson's haraDgue, or
Stewards prophecies on the occasion, but they
were, no doubt, =. in the usual form" Piqu-
ancy was quite likely given to me feast of
Democratic reason and the h)w of Democratic
champagne, by the veto of the District su ffrsge
bill, wh ich the il" Moses " and " beet friend -