The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1867-04-09
Suit LOvengOOd's Dream--Tarta.
rus, and What He Saw There.

an fndin' a lot owe green whisky, I jist
sucked in skin full oye it straight along.
Well, / dreamed me dream, I thought
/ we're in hell, an had been sent there
for Yotin the radikill ticket. I felt the
justice of the sentence SO much so that I
didn't feel so uneasy an mad about hit as
| wud been if they had sent me for
murderin' blithe ole oman, or maxim a
back log of some, gals fus baby, arterf
soakin' hit in turpentine,- or sich like
common wickedness. Well, I thought
hell was perfect roun' hole-as roun' as
a bumb shell right plumb in the centre Of
the -yearth. The walls were glazed as an
Iingyun peelin' an hit were just half full
owe melted dinner pots, dog irons, an ole
clock weights, with scum Of smoRiin ,
birthstone foot deep. The devil staid
aboard of a. boat, an had hisself rowed.
roun' jist M as he pleased, BY the jury what
foun' bill agin JEFF Davis. They look
ed sorter like they d like to have another
pop. at that.jo5. | think BY golly they'd
hunt a long spell afore they foun' hitagin
if they jist had another chance, !, 80 $,
/ thought thar wer long leather -aidged.
elects nailed on the wall to climb by
They. yer squar edged up so as the
climbin' had all to be done on one side,
an whenever fellers got tired ofsvimmin'
they jist sot into climbin' the elects. I
noticed that new corners wer powerful
fond of climin'. They'd sorter slack off
sometimes ontil they sunk into the melted
clock weights up to the pint Of their tail
bones, an by the ghost of scared mon,
key, they'd come up over handed to thar
work agip, jist wrigglin'. and snortin'.
They worked like squirrils on a tired, mill.
IDurn'd if they didn't keep the thing rol. !
lin straight along; and, George, jist as
sure as you is a foot high, that's ,,ohat
keeps the yearth turnin' around. I found
hit out at last. Well, one day the trap.
door opened, an the devil ordered ole
Forney to steer under the hole. He
steers wild, an after swimmin' nearly all
over hell, he got hit thar; when down
poured into the boat the durnd'st sldice,
of mean lookin' cusses you ever seed ~
Everybody already thar turned their.
heads to look at 'em, an clum faster.
Skeered at 'em, by gollyl They wer rad
kills, the last. durn'd one. Some had
roaps aroun' their mex, wifi runnin'
ahin the year; some had holes in their
heads; some had, a big gill cut under their
chins, and every one shode signs Of hard
times and hurry. Among 'em I see Ste!
vens, Sumner, Wade, Butler surnamed
the Beast-an' Wendell Phillips. "HeyF,
sez the degil,a a"whatls wrong above; chol-
ery?" "Wus nor that says Sumner,
|,'the Constitution people has riz, and owe
korce zoe dre oil here Say, your majes.
ty, is Preston Brooks here? y aOh, no, y
seq the devil. "Wel!," sez Sumner, ,sorter
brightenin' up an -rubbin' his hands,
"Stop mint, sez the devil, await until
I sorts you all out" He took out needil
as long as harpoon, and with big guile
of trace chains he threaded it. Then he
picked cut all the common cusses among
'em and strung 'em on the chain, and
then hung the whole bunch over the
aidge Of the boat into the birthstone. Je-
hosaphatl how they sizzled, an sloshed,
an dove, an sprinkled hot iron about
wifi their tails. A string of7sun pearch
would have been just no whar.
White the devil wassstringin' the small
| fry, Butler, surnamed the Beast, aidged
back to where l sot in the boat, a keepin
one eye sot on the devil, an tother on me
an he whispered in my ear, "Whars Sis
yphus?" Sez l, "Don't know; why2"-
"Oh! nothin' only wanted to see which
knowed the most Of our trades, him OF
me-" Then he whispered, Chat mortal
off eye owe hlsin still sot on the devil, J
"Say,, do yo1 know wbar. his majesty
keeps his spoons?" Sez I: ado you see
that chain hangin' over the starn7 He
keeps EN- in a big pot sunk attother end
owe hit" He just went over the starr
head fust and coon'd hit down the chain
outen sightlonders the birthstone. After
beini gone spell he come back, lookin
disappointed like; but his general look,
were powerfully improved by his bath in
melted birthstone. ! swow, he looked a
heap more like a human. Sezj he, HGone
pot an ALL" Iopened my eyes. Sez he
'Hain't Forney got emp Sez 1: "MaJ
be so-he's been. fnmblin' roun'. the. starr
a good WHILE Durn'd if he didn'tsearcf
every pocket, Forney had, AN the ole Gus:
never cotch, him at hit, an he got III.
spooasl While this wer gwine on, ok
Thad wer tryin to claim kin wifi the dey
Ill, comparin' his foot along wifi oil
Nick's. I think .he pint were to git al
Office, for I heern the devil keep sayin'
laNo, no, I be burned if do; we has or
4 der here now. An all the time oil,
i Wade wer a pesterin' his majesty for ,
/ free ticket on his doggery. l seed tha
the devil were gittin nionstrous oneasy
! Wendell Phillips KEEP watchin' fust th,
side that went down onder the climbers
and then the side what come up out ov,
the lake. He jist hoped overheard, an
syum over thar, an tryin' his durndss
ID turn hit 9tother ioay, he'd grab the slop
ing side of the elects, an hold on as Ion,
as he could, and then slosh back agil
among the melted dogirons an birthstone
I i reckon he must made fifty trials afor,
he quit, tan' swum baek!to the boat, an
then he sot in the most yearnest manne
to persuadiDg the devil to take off th,
elects, an nail iem on agin upside down
so as to run hell backwards, and one kore
The outside aoorld soith hit, without giyin
a single reason why hit would help tb'
matter. This made the devil bile over
He sed: s"Not durn'd one of 'em shoult