davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Minnesota Staats-Zeitung. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1858-1877, 1867-04-06
Gina &@neioer,
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mp6ebltt fa btermtt R6Fi&f BEN e%sebrten beutf&en gsr'
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The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
The Amenities of Life.

Thus says the Springfield Mass.
Republican:
There was noteworthy illustra,
tive incident on a rail-car out OF
Springfield the other day. A big,
black, but clean and wei! dressed 'col.
orod brother entered and sat down
bv ano Of ts,e, at least rOi uneiiy, -Iul-
ing race The white man looked
venom at the black one, and hissed
out, DO you suppose am going to
sit by a black niger like you-let
me get OUT squeezed by into the isle,
and took vacant seat in front, by
the side of small, Yale student lad
from Springfield. The latter looked
at the new conner, and saying. Do
you suppose / can sit by you, sir,
let me pass out got up, and went
back to the vacant seat by the black
man. The party of the first part
grew pale with added feeling, and
said
do you prefer to sit by nigger ?
Il prefer to sit By q gentleman
DO you dare to say am not a gen
tleman p a gentleman never swears,
or insults n man because of his color.
You shall be taken care of, you i'm
pudent jackanapes.' When the black
brother, stalwaIt and suggestive,
spoke in-I will take care of him,
sir There ensued "a splendid pass
age of silence and the car went on,
and there was no assault and battery
for the Worchester police court.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
The EOllieS of aNigLf.

Not thousand miles from here
lives one James P, or, as he was
familiarly known among his host of
friends, Jim. Now, the aforesaid
Jim is an eccentric IN every sense OF
:he word, yet moreover generous,
noble hearted, and possessed of more
genial courage than falls to the lot of
man. The following is, as nearly as
we can giveit, 4 relation Of night
adventure:
One morning we met him in the
street, looking rather melancholy.
when he said
yesterday 1 felt q little bad, and
mark you, i went and took small
drink; and that not improving my
feelings, took another and another,
don't you observe, and finally l got
a little tight. In the evening l went
into the country with friend, mark
you, and thinking l would cool OF, /
took several more drinks when | got
there, don't you observe, yet, strange
to say, the more drank the tighter
/ got, until, mark you, l was totally
unconscious when I went to bed. Du-
ring the night / woke up, don't you
observe, and l could not imagine
where in the mischief i was, mark
you. The room was dark as Egypt.
| heard a clock strike two in some
part Of the house, mark you; / became
very anxious to lean my whereabouts,
don't you observe, and for that pur
pose arose from my bed, mark you,
and after stumbling about over a
dozen chars, don't you observe, i
came to a table. Now, mark you, ]
reflected that the generality of apart
ments are a perfect or an oblong
square, don't you observe, and / de-
duced from this, mark you, that by
feeling along the table until l came
to corner, | could get off at right
angles and reach q corner of the
room, and by that guide by the wall
to door or window, don't you oh
serve. Following out the idea,
mark you, l began carefully TO feel
along the edge of the aforesaid table,
and finally gaining confidence / went
little faster; the idea struck me that
it was blamed long table, that /
could not get corner, don't you OBJ
serve; and when sufficient light PEN
etrated the room, / saw, mark you,
that l had been following a round
table all night, looking for corner,
don't you observe"
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

with sweet words of forgiveness up
on her lips that redoubled the an
guish of his breaking heart. No;
She got over it. He raE off and went
to sea at last, and didn't come back
and find himself sad and alone IN the
world, his loved ones sleeping in the
quiet churchyard, and the vine-em-
powered home of his boyhood tum.
bled down and going TO decay. All
no; he came home drunk as piper
and got into the station-house the
first thing.
And he he grew up and married
and raised large family, and brain
ed them with an axe one night, and
got wealth by all manner of cheating
and rascality, and now he is the in
fernalist wicked scoundrel in his ma
tive village, and is universally re
spected, and belongs to the Legisla
ture.
So you see there never was bad
James in the Sunday school books
that had such q streak of luck as thu:
sinful James with the charmed life.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
Uncle Sam. Geneology,

Sam was of immaculate conception
He was born in Philadelphia, on the
4th of July, 1776. He was born
talking. His first words were found
IN the Declaration of Independence,
which shook the thrones of Europe
to their centers. King George, while
he was young, undertook to whip
him, because he was sassy With
the help of George Washington, he
licked the Kings forces, and took as
much land as he wanted.
Uncle Sam married an American
woman, called Constitution, and has
had by her 81 sons and daugh-
ters, all Of whom are now living and
occupying a place from the Atlantic
to the Pacific ocean. Constitution has
three or four young ones still at the
breast. Sans family, however, are
peculiar. They feed, fattey, and
thrive on Constitutions republican
milk, and obey their mother,
Sam protects his family by throw
ing around them great flag, glitter.
ing with stars, and red with the blood
of the martyrs of liberty. Uncle
Sam, and his family, are now the
greatest people on the face of the
earth. Sam, like other men of large
families, has had his troubles but
ballot-boxes, and minnie balls, keep
all things straight in the long run. =
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

The following is from rhe conclu-
ding chapter of the official report of
Prof. G. W. Hoss, Superintendent
of Public instruction, for the State
of Indiana:
These schools are daily training,
not only in knowledge, but in virtue,
IN truth and duty, two hundred and
fifty five thousand children of Indi-
ana. And these children, though
'tumbling their spelling books and
coming their multiplication tables
in 1867, will, in 1896 be builders OF
the temple of liberty, laying deeper
and stronger its dome. Yes, every
house that gladens vale or crowns
a hill top in our State, or elsewhere
in this broad land, is n hulwork of
freedom. with guns shotted, charged
and trained on the lines of the enc
mics of law and order, and of good
government. Hence, support the
schools and you support the govern
ment; increase the schools and you
increase the advocates and defen-
ders of freedom foster that public
intelligence which are to become the
golden setting for the gem Of liberty
that is to blaze on the brow of the
republic forever.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

One of the latter day saints lately
accosted friend thus-'Do you be,
lieve the second advent is near al
hand ? Second advent-who is he ?
why the second coming of our Lord
and Savior Let him come-let
him come. He's a good man he
won't hurt anybody The Miller.
ite Immediately washed.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

Once at coronation scene, per
son who was impressed with the maj
esty Of human sovereignty said t.
a gentleman beside him, Our Emper
or is very great The gentleman re
piled, But God is greater Yes,
said the sycophant, but our emperoI
10 young St.'
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

DEISONS wishing to buy or sell Real Es
4 tate. will find IL 10 their advantage 10 cal
at the office Gf gURKET Il HANLIN, over
j. 5. PatiersonS Store, cor ner Main and San
dustry streets.
Amcng the many farms and desirable
town property are The following:
40-A farm of 100 acres J mile northwest OF
McCOmb. 80 acres cledred, balance good
timber; fine orchard. cider press, good
frame dwelling and large bank barn in
course OF construction. fences in good re.
pair, everything IN first class order. Price
$50 per ac-e-S3.000 in hand, remainder
IN one and two years. VIII exchange foI
good farm in Missouri.
39-Farm Of ll2 acres in Findlay township
IS acres cleared, balance good timber, la.
stream of running water through IL, tgC
good dwellings .and fine barn, two good
orchards. Price, s95 90 per acre.
29-l2o acres of land in Fulton county. Hi
nois, miles from Illinois River and steam
bnat landing, ~ mites from Chicago Il Ful
ton Co. L. r., miles from LewistOwn. the
couniy-seat; 30 acres timber, balance
prairie Price, SO per acre.
3s-Nos. Z and s Colts out-lots two acres
There is small frame dwelling, stable anc
other out buildings, good water, &c. Price,
$1,000 in cash.
3i-l63 acres Of land in Eagle township,
Hancock 1uDty. Ohio, 80 acres cleare
and uLder good state OF cultivation. There
Is good twO-story frame dwelling with
cellar, and woOd-house adjoining a large
frame barn and other out. buildings. Plenty
Of good spring and well water; large APP
pie, pear cherry and peach orchard two
large sugar camps, SC. One mile west Of
Bellefontaine road and half mile from
Bishops mill. School within % rods
Price. $50 per acre Terms easy. % acres
Will be sold separately al $40 per acre.
s6-l! story frame dwelling, containing six
rooms and summer Kitchen with a never
failing well OF good waller inside with two
foe lots well arranged with ornamental,
apple, peach. cherry and plum trees.
grapes aud currants. good barn with gran
cries. sheds and stablIng for four horses,
everything in first class order. Price,
$1,000. on reasonable terms.
I-204 acres Of land, one mile south of Cour
House, good orchard, 200 sugar trees, de
sirable country seat
$50 acres timber land in section 81, in Del.
aware township. Price. $1,000. cash.
2j-2 desirable building lots on Sandusky
Street. Price, $50.
pa frame honse on W. Sandusky street,
Tot IS well fenced. Price. $500.
1.-TWO building lots CHI and 2Is) in vance's
addition. Price. $3.50.
ia story frame dwelling, on Crawford
street, s rooms, good well and cistern,
everything in good order. Price, sl600-
S-House and lot on Jones street. Price.
Si59.
1.-TWO story brick dwelling on Sandusky
street near Main, metal roof, wood house,
well and cistern, all in fine order. Price,
$500.
52-A fine residence on Sandusky street.
Price, $1,000.
33--l3 story frame dwelling on W. sandusky
street, containing or rooms; good barn,
milk house, well of water. and plenty Of
fruit and ornamental trees on lot. Price,
s2700.
EI VIII attend 10 all Legal Busi-
ness entrusted 10 their care.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

People say they shell peas when
they unshell them that they husk
corn when they unhusk it; that they
dust furnature when they undust it,
or take the dust from it; that they
skin calf when they unskin it; and
that they scale fishes when they un-
scale them. Many men say they are
going to weed their gardens, when
their gardens are weedy enough al
ready. .--
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

A freedman was found on the street
the other day hunting for the gem
man who 'ployed juromen. Sum
body said dat he was givin' 81 a day
for hands; but he would work for 81,
specie
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

why don't you get married !?
sald young lady the other day tc
a bachelor friend. Il have been try.
ing for the last ten years to find some
one who would be foolish enough to
have me- was the reply. Il guess
you haven't been up our way was
the insinuating rejoiner.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

The subject of impression at first
sight was being talked over at the
supper table when the lady whose
duty it was to preside 'over the cups
and tea said she always formed an
opinion Of person at first sight, and
generally found it to be correct
Mamma said the youngest son, in
shrill voice, that attracted the at
tention of all present well my dear,
what Is it replied the fond mother.
Il want to know what was your opin-
ion of me when you first saw me 2
The question gave sudden turn to
the conversation.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

An old clergyman who had been
an army chaplain, and was teaching
female seminary, inthe course o
conversation, said, i have been under
civil government, ecclesiastical gov,
ernment, military government anC
petticoat government-and / like
petticoatgovernment best
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

To make valuable speckled dor g
bullet proof, Mark Twain says Take
off his hide and line it with sheet iron.
Russian iron is the best, and is slick
er and more snowy than the com
mon kind. Dogs prepared in this
way do not mind bullets.
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

A crusty old doctor declined to
pay his PAYERS bill, saying, 'his pave.
ment had been spoiled and then GOV.
cred up with earth to hide the bad
work Doctor was the reply
mine is not the only bad work they
put earth over
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
An Irish gentleman. parting

An Irish gentleman, parting with
lazy servant woman, was asked,
with respect toh erindustry, whether
she was what is termed "afraid OF
work5' "Oh not at ALL" said he,
"not at all; she'll frequently lie down
and fall asleep by the very side of it. -
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

A story is told of an inveteratt
drinker, who signed the temperance
pledge, but was found soon after i'm
bibing as often as before. To hi:
friend who demonstrated with him
he replied that the document which
he signed was not valid because il
had no internal revenue stamp
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

A couple of neighbors became SO
inimical that they would not speak to
each other; but one, having been
converted at 4 camp meeting, on see
ing his former enemy, held out his
hand, saying, How dye do. Kemp I
I am humble enough to shake hands
with q dog
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

There are present so many pick
pockets in Paris, that Off GERS are ap
pointed at the railway stations tC
cry this warning to travellers: Don't
forget that there are thieves in TIE
saloon and baggage-room.'
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

A certain sign-board has the fol
lowing classical inscription: All
persons what are found fyghteing oil
trespusslng on this ground will b,
executed wild de utmost wigger ol
the law
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

An honest Dutchman, in training
up his son in the way he should go,
frequently exercised him in the Bi-
BILE lessons. On one of these occa-
sions he asked him:
Who vas dat would not shleep
nit Botipher's wifer
'Shoseph.'
Oats Good boy. Vel, vat vas de
reason he would not shleep mid her 7
Don't know. Shpose he wasn't
shleepy.'
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
THE WHITE PINE COMPOUND.

at WAS carly IN the spring Of 1855 that
this compound was originated. A member
of my family Was afflicted with an Irritation
of the throat attended with disagreeablt
cough. | had 1or some months previous
thought that preparation having for its
basis the inside bark of the white pine,
might be so compounded as to be very use
full in diseases OF the throat and lungs. To
attest the value of il in the case alluded TO,
compounded small quantity of the medi.
cine had been planning, and gave IL In tea
spoonful doses. The result was exceedingly
| gratifying. Within Two days the irritatic u
of the throat was removed, the cough sub.
sided and a speedy cure was Effected. Soon
after this sent some 10 a lady IN LOndonder. r.
| rs. n. H.. who had been suffering tor week 6
! with pad cough occasiCnei by sudden cuid,
and had raised mucous streaksd with blood.
She soon found relief and sent for more. She
/ took about ten ounces Of IL, and got we'll
J. B. CLARK, Esq. editor Of the Mancheste
] Daily Mirror. inAde a trial Of the same pre-
paration in the case OF d severe cold. and
WAS cured Immediately. He WAS 81 highly
pleased with the results, and So confident in
success attendingii its sales. IL placed before
she public, that he finally persuaded me Ia
give Il n name, and send II abroad to benefit
the suffering. ln November, less. nrst ad
gertised IL under the name OF The White
4 Pine Compound. Ia two yeaI3 from that
tune there had been Whuiesaled IN Manches
{, soll the lead OF all the cuGEh remedies in
I market. al d siill maintains that possi.
zion. There are good reasons TOR all this: (.
! is very soothing and healing in its nature is
warming Ia the stomach, and pleasant with
al to the taste. and is exceedingly cheap.
''As remedy for kidney complaints, the
White Pine Compound stands unrIvalled. II
was not originated for Ihat purpose, but a
person In using II for cough. was not only
cured Of the cough. bat was also cured of a
I idney difficulty of ten years standing
since THAI accidental discovery many thou
sands have used II for the same complain nj
and have been completely cured
The above Was written by DR.. Poland IN
1860. Since then, as in Manchester. the
White Pine Compound has taken the lead oi
all cough remedies, as well as preparations
1 for the cure of Kidney difficulties, IN every
city. town. village and hamlet, throughout
the New England States.
| This remedy Is as sale and pleasant 10 take
as II Is eiiectaal.
/ The editor OF tho Manchester Daily and
/ Weekly MIrrcr, in the leader of the Daily.
thus writes OF tie Compound:
a. The White cine Compound is advertised
AT much length in cur columns, and we are
happv To- learn that the demand Tor IL is in
crossIhg beyond all previous expectations
IL is the very best me iicine for coughs aud
colds We know OF, ana 10 family that has
once used It viii ever be wiihoutit. We
speak from our Owi knowledge. IL IL sure
Il, Etll = roid. and pleasant ~ IL ls sure
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
THE CHINGARORA
-Anti-N ervous
Smoking Tobacco! !

HNuE CHINGARURA TOBACCO grows from
i the rich soil of The = ORIENT" ana is
possessed Of u peculiarly delicious flavor
entiraly unknown e. the tohacOos ct all 9th
er climes- But It's unprecedented populari
ty has sprung from the fact Of the entire alb
sence Of that deadly poison .NicofiH, which
permeates every other tobacco, and which
Is the one and sole cause of the distressing
nervous diseases. dyspepsia, &c.. which
most invariably, sooner or later. follow thr
indulgence Of the pipe and cigar. At the
recent analyz ltion II tObOcco from all part
OF the world, ~ the Academy OF Sciences
in Paris, the renowned ChemistsM. Lannon'S
reaux. declared that while European and
American tobacco contained fully eight per
cent and the pure Havana tobacco from tive
to five per cent. of NirOiin, the CHIEGARo
RA did not contain one discuver;tbla partI-
Gle OF the deadly poison. drop Of which.
extracted, wall destroy lite.
Our Agent at BOMBAY has shipped -,ts
large quantities Of the CHINGARORA durin,
the past two years, and although We have
been pressed TO supply the demand for this
delicious luxury to the vetern smoker, yet
we are now prepored to Ofer II IN unlimited
quantities. at price much lower than some
american tobacco OF - far inferior quality
A connOiseur has but 10 smoke the Anne ri.
can tobacco and segars, which are invxria-
bly, chemically favored, to be disgusted with
he medicinal taste which leaves "A nauseOus.
unhealthy coating in the mouth, and in time
seldom fails to shatter the nervous system.
The natives of the - ORIENT" smoke the
.CHlNGARORA from morn TILL night, from
youth to age, and are happily unconscious
u, the wild, distressing Are which courses
through tho veins OF the inhaler Of the fu-
mes 0f tobacco containing Nioofin.
We invite every lover OF the weed IN Try
the CHlSGARORA and guarantee urPrece-
dentcd pleasure 10 III delicious nsvur.
s1 SOLD EVERYWHERE.
EDWIN M. COOK & CO..
Sole Agents and Importers OF the CHINtfA-
RORA TOBACCO for the United States
and Canadas, and Dealers in all kinds oi
Hapaaa AmerieaA SegaJS Il T'oJaecOs
MAIN DEPor, I97 DUANE ST., New YORK.
may 3nO50.3m
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
THE WHITE PINE COMPOUND.
GEO. w. SWEET, Proprietor.

PREPARED Bl THE
New England Botanical Depot,
100 Hanover street, Boston,
Under the supervision OF Rev. J. W Poland.
EE-i;en;on, Myers & Csnneld, and strong
X armstrong. Wholesale Agents, Cleveland.
For safe la FIudLay by C. ID. EItiager X Co.,
NJ. Cray. =. & J. M. Huber u Co.. and :.
d. Ftey S.Co., dealers in. drugsssand medici-
mes cenerZli. maTS.ly
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19
sIoAH's CONDITION POWDER

Hss the largest sale Of any Horse and Cattle Medicine
In this country IL composed q herbs and roos and
for rnidness safety tAnty and thorOugness stands
pre-eminsntly at the kssd Of the hst Of HoTse and
Czt,is M,dictaes-
IL carries on all gross humors prevents horses nom
tscoming stn laundering puriss the blood Ioossns
the ski snd give- t smooth and glossy appearsocs.
ceanses the and strengthens every part Of the
body IL Is also safe and certain remedy for eOcghs
Aat colds, which generate % many nrzi diseases
The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1867-07-19

The Best and Cheapest Horse and Cattle
Hadieiua in fl.a XorIdl
Owyhee bullion. [volume] (Silver City, I.T. [Idaho]) 1866-1867, 1867-06-27
CRISPER COMA.

Silver City, June 6 1867. sc:ws.
Owyhee bullion. [volume] (Silver City, I.T. [Idaho]) 1866-1867, 1867-06-27

oh she was beautiful and fair,
With starry eyes, and radiant hair,
Whose curling tendrils soft, entwinod,
Unclaimed the very heart and mind.
cRIsPER COMA,
For Curling the Hair of either Sex into
Wnvy and Glossy Ringlets or Heavy
MASSIVE CURLS.
By using this article Ladies and Gentlemen
can beautify themselves a thousand fold, n is
the only article in the world that will curl straight
hair, and at the same time give it beautiful,
Crsossy appearance. The Crisper Coma not only
curls the hair, but invigorates, beauties and
clesnses it; is highly and delightfully."- perfumed,
and is the most complete article of the kind ever
offered to the American public. The Crisper Co.
ma will be sent to any address, sealed and po..-
paid for 81.
Address all orders to
W. L. CLARK d CO., Chemists,
Ne.S West Fsyesse Street, 8TsAcUsh IA
Owyhee bullion. [volume] (Silver City, I.T. [Idaho]) 1866-1867, 1867-06-27

Which can smell rat the quickest
the man who-knows the most or the one
who has the most nose ?
Derivation of bus. Bus to kiss. Re-
bus, to kiss again. Blunder-bus, to kiss
an old woman. Silly-bus; Two girls kiss
ing each other. Omni bus; To kiss all
in the room.
Owyhee bullion. [volume] (Silver City, I.T. [Idaho]) 1866-1867, 1867-06-27

GEoGRPHY Glass. Teacher-I want
you to explain the points of the compass
"'Bobby, what is the highest latitude
known ?"
1.-THE highest latitude known is that
which Bill Jones allows to his feelings
when waltzing with. our Kate"
"Now, what is before you, joint"
THE north, sir"
And what behind you, Tommy ?"
MY coat tail, sir said he, trying at
the same time to get glimpse.
Joseph, where is Africa p
'On the map, SIR"
4 mean, on what continent, the East
ern or WESTERN
We'll, the land of Africa is on the
Eastern continent, but the people all of
'em are down South
How do the African people live?
by drawing
by dawing what; waters'
1 No, Sir, by drawing their breath
Come here sonny, and tell me what
the four seasons are p
Pepper, mustard, salt, and vinegar;
them's what ma seasons with
Geography class dismissed