davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12
"I've got 'en, too"

/ Two whiskey-drinking friends,
who had been on a prolonged
spree, wandered into a livery sta.
BILE the other night, and were al.
lowed by the man in charge, who
knew them, to lie down on a bed
in the Office to sleep off the fumes
of accumulated alcohol. Now it
happened that there was a young
puppy under the bed, in basket
covered up with a blanket. Sud
denly one Of the men woke up
and heard succession of smoth-
cred barks, coming from some di-
rection, he knew not where. Wa
king up his companion, he said:
s'Jim, do you hear that dog
barking?"
Jim didn't, of course, because
the dog had stopped. He listened,
and hearing nothing, told his
friend it was but fancy-there was
no dog. "Wasn't there, though p
urged Bill, growing suddenly excl
ted, and the sweat starting out on
him.
"No, you fool" said the other.
"Then, Jim, / have got the tre-
mems |" he shrieked. and attempt
ed to leap out Of bed. But Jim
clung to him, and finally by sooth-
ing conversation, prevailed upon
him. to lie still, and after a little
while the frightened hummer went
to sleep. Jim didn't, however.
He was wakeful from nervous re-
action, and the gnawing Of re-
morseful conscience, which man
feels when he is coming out of a
debauch.
Suddenly the puppy under the
bed began to bark again. 1t was
a low, muffled sound, that seemed
to come from the air, and then
there was something so mysterious
and weird in it, that Jim, who sat
upright in bed, shivered in every
fibre. He listened with straining
ears and protruding eyeballs, and
when he caught the sound once
more, "That stretched his father
on bloody bier" he clutched his |
sleeping companion with frantic |
and shook him until his |
teeth ratified, and shrieked: |
GIVE got 'em too, Bill; I've got |
emf!
"Got what, Jim?'
"Tremens !"
The ostlers were alarmed and |
came rushing in, when an expla-
nation ensued, and the puppy that
had caused so great agitation was
found. Jim. and Bill got sober at
length, and they haven't been on
D spree since.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

We find in an exchange an ac-
count Of the remarkable instinct
Of a dog that informed a lady of
the loss of her veil. The account
reads-"She was followed by the
animal some distance, the creature
endeavoring to make her sensible
of something by looking in her
face, and then pointing with his
nose behind" This ''nose behind"
is a new feature in dogs, and
though we do not doubt the sag
acity, we are not SO sure of the in-
strument.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12
TERMS.

w Two nOAAaIS lOf one year, t1Ud-
sIably in advance
.sT Single copies, Ten Cents each.
Advertisements inserted at One Dollar
per square of Ten Lines or less for the first
insertion Fifty Cents for each continuance.
tE- a liberal deduction will be made to
persons advertising for three, six, nine, OF
twelve months.
OF Obituaries and calls on candidates,
Fifty Gents per square.
CT The privilege of yearly advertisers Is
strictly limited to their own immediate and
regular business and the business Of an ad-
vertising firm is not considered as including
that of its individual members. 0ETNo de-
Walton from these terms under any circum-
stances.
0T dvertisements not marked with the
number of insertions when handed in, viii be
continued until ordered out, and payment
exacted.
OF No advertisement inserted gratuitously
EIs Advertisements of az abusive nature
will not be inserted at any price.
lIe Announcing candidates Five Dollars,
to be paid in advance in every case.
OF Job Printing of all kinds neatly
done on New Type, and on as reasonable
terms as any Office in Tennessee.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

BAKED HAM.-Most persons boil
ham. They are much better baked,
il. baked right. Soak for an hour
in clean water, and wipe dry, and
then spread it all over with thin
flour batter, and lay in a deep
dish with sticks under to keep it
out of the gravy. When fully
done, take off the skin and the
batter crusted upon the flesh side,
and set away to cool. You will
find it very delicious, but rich for
dyspeptics, says one of our agri.
cultural exchanges.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12
TsmpIe nf the Wlnsss.


I am dying, Andy, dying:'
Corn and bacon will not last!
And the dark Plutonian shadowa
Gather on the evening blast.
Issue rations to support me,
Not working orders bow thine ear,
Listen to the Freedman's secrets,
Not for thee alone to hear.
Though overseers and the driver
Raise on high the lash no more,
Though Abe Lincoln's proclamation
Lands me safe on freedoms shore,
Though no irons now surround ne,
To make me do that white mans will,
Yet I'm sick, and faint, and hungry
And there's nothing left to steal!
Lei not Southern servile minions
Mock the lion thus laid low:
Twas no toeman's hand that felled him,
Twas the Bureau dealt the blow!
Hear, then, pillowed on this bosom,
Ere too late, the freedman say,
"Give me rations, give me franchise,
Ere the life tide ebbs away"
"Hark We, Howard, tell the rabble,
Who demand that 1 should sweat,
That my noble spouse, poor Dinah,
Weeping in her lone retreat,
Has had dreams-the gods have told her,
Affairs, augurs, circling wings,
That our blood, with Yankees mingled,
Yet shall mount the throne of kings!"
AS for all these freedmen Knockers,
Home and foreign, rank and file,
Light their path to Stygian horrors
With the splendor of thy smile;
Give the freedmen crowns and arches,
Let their brows the laurel twine;
I can scorn all labor contracts,
Triumphing in love like thine!
Yes, I'm dying, Andy, dying,
Hark! the insulting provost's cry,
They are coming quick my falchion,
Let me face them ere l die.
Now no more mid deselation
Shall my name contention swell;
Phillips, Sumner-devil take yel
Brownlow! Beecher! Chase! farewell
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

As the dog days have come, we
provide our readers with the follow.
ing antidote for hydrophobia =
Eat green shoots of asparagus,
raw; sleep and perspiration viii be
induced, and the disease can be
cured in any state of canine mad
ness. A man in Athens, Greece,
was cured by this remedy after
the paroxysms had commenced.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

In 1862, a man named Mulborn
of Pomfret, Conn, enlisted in the
navy, and not being heard from
for several years, was supposed to
have died, and his wife married
Mr.. Green. A short time since
Mulborn returned, and his wife,
preferring her first husband, deser-
ted Green and returned to her for
mer home. This rather "riled'e
Green; and on Monday evening
last he attempted.to take the Life
of Mrs Mulborn by shooting her
in the breast. She was badly but
not dangerously wounded.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The New Bedford Mass Her.
cury says that a lady In New York
who was having an expensive set
of teeth made by her dentist, sud-
denly died. The afflicted hus-
band, as soon as possible, fastened
to say that ''those teeth" would
not be needed. But the job be-
ing already completed, the only
arrangement upon which the
parties could agree was for the
dentist to retain his wares, receiv-
ing ten dollars in addition from
the widower. By way of max
ing the matter satisfactory all
round, the latter begged the use
of the teeth for the funeral, prom
ising to return them the next day.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The Chicago Z inaes thinks the
suspension Of Stanton will add
one more to the list of Presiden-
tial aspirants. 1t says "the Pres
ident's official boot has inflicted a
wound upon Stanton which will
appeal powerfully to Radical SYM
pathy. Barring the difference in
locality, it is good deal such a
wound as made Sumner famous
The sore head of the latter was
the making of him politically !;
the sore breech of the former may
have the same effect in the case
of the Presidency"
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

'Look here, boy" said a ner-
vous gentleman to an urchin who
was munching candy ct a lecture,
E'you are annoying me very much. "
"No I amt, NEITHER" said the ur-
chin, s'I'm a gnawing this ere
candy"
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12
Tremendous high-heeled shoe,

Tremendous high-heeled shoes
are the latest style for ladies'
This is made necessary by wearing
the chignon on top Of the head and
drawing the back hair up SO tight.
Some ladies could ne more stand
fat-footed without swapping the
back hair than they could fly;
and now, with high-heeled shoes,
some go about on tip-toe, the strain
is So severel
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Pegged boots, if occasionally
dressed with petroleum between
the soles and upper leather, will
not rip. IF the soles of boots or
shoes are dressed with petroleum,
they will resist wet and wear well.
The pegs, it is said, are not affect
ed by dryness after being we'll sat-
qrated with the liquid.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12
Hard to COMPREHEND.

| Judge G@, OF Georgia, was
very Democratic, both in politics
and religion, and especially SO in
the latter. Several years ago he
was in attendance ON the Superior
Court. The Presbyterians Of the
place, headed by their Jealous and
energetic minister, were at that
time actively engaged in an effort
to build a new house of worship.
The Rev. Mr.. Collins was jealous
ly enlisted in the good cause, and
never let an opportunity slip with
out presenting his subscription
list to all whom he might meet
One day, when court adjourned, as
the Judge was passing out of the
courthouse, the reverend gentle
man touched him on the shoulder
and asked him to step aside with
him moment, when the following
colloquy took place:
>'sThis is Judge C., be-
lieve?" said MIR. Collins.
'It is" said the Judge.
owe are engaged" said Mr.. O.,
"in endeavoring to build us new
house of worship. Perhaps this
(handing the Judge his subscrip-
tion list) will inform you of my
object better than l can tell you.''
Here the judge looked very
professional, took out his spectac-
les, examined the heading of the
list very critically, and for a mo-
ment seemed engaged in profound
thought; then turning to the ex-
pectant parson, the Judge, with
SLY twinkle of the eye and the
blandest smile imaginable, remar-
ed, shat a0iU bind them, sir-that
will bind them; no doubt about it
that will bind them"
This took the reverend gentle
man little aback. But rallying
again, he renewed the attack in
the following style:
':But, judge, you don't under
stand me; [ want you to help us.
We are going to raise"
"Ahg' said the judge, "you are |
going to have raising, are you? |
Well, just let me know when it is,
and | will send up three or four |
hands with pleasure"
Here Mr.. C's. countenance ex-
hibited a good deal of disgust, |
and he appeared to be perfectly |
5ewildered at what seemed the
judges stupidity. "Why," said
ne, 'judge, it's a brick house we
want"
GA brick house, is it?" said the
judge; ga brick? Won't a log
house do as well? Several years
lgo we built a log house in our
community for religious purposes
some cut the logs-some hewed
hem-some split the boards
ome raised the house--and some
covered it-and the Lord has
lever made any complaint against
yet. If you build a log house,
nd the Lord complains, I'll head
,our subscription list for brick
me-"
The parson gave in and left.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

WHIsKERs.-The English Ad-
miralty have just issued an order
prohibiting officers from wearing
whiskers of such inordinate size
and length as to resemble ''beards. 7"
The Lords do not state at what
point Of size and length the wi-is-
ker ceases to be a whisker and
becomes a beard.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The editor of the Griffin (Ga.)
Union has been shown Bartlett
pear from that neighborhood meas
uring eleven and half inches in
circumference, either way, and
weighing fifteen and a half ounces.
Pretty fair, for an unreconstructed
bit of fruit.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The Mongrel party taxes six
teen thousand articles. 1t taxes
everything but the breath of a
mans body, and it comes SO near
taxing that, that it taxes the breath
out Of his body.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

An old man, astride an old
white horse, has been preach
ing to the deluded souls of Fond
du Lac, Wis, admonishing them
to prepare for the dissolution of
the world, which he assured them
was net far distant.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

A man is judged by the compa-
ny he keeps.-Cleuela'ad Herald.
A member of Congress from
Ohio, Mr.. Ashley, and General
Butler, kept company with Con-
over, the perjurer. We are not
satisfied whose character suffered
the most in this company.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

A lady asks us to publish the
following receipt for driving worms
away from cabbage: Take a hand
full or two of dry dirt and sprin-
kle it over the plant, then pull off.
the bottom leaves and cover the
cabbage with them.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The soundest argument produ-
ces no more conviction in an empty
head than the most superficial
defamation; as a feather and a
guinea fall with equal velocity in
q vacuum.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

One person out of every five
in the New England States dies
of consumption, while in Georgia
only one out Of thirty-six is
a victim of that disease.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

A dentist at Sparta, Wis.,. late
ly pulled eight teeth from anuphol-
sterer's head in sixteen seconds.
We've no doubt the poor devil
"held his jaw" for a while after
that.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Domestic infelicity has induced
a Western editor to publish mar
riages, births and deaths, under
the respective heads Of "Fools,"
"Unfortunates, and "In Luck"
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

There is strong talk among
prominent Radicals, of establish
ing Radical newspaper in Nash
vile in opposition to the Press and
Times, many of the party having
become disgusted with the politi-
cal conduct of that unscrupulous
organ. T.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Among all his chaf, Wendell
Phillips has this solitary grain Of
wheat: "The best education in
the world is that got by struggling
to get living"
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

"He leaves five wives and sev.
enteen children to mourn his loss,e-
are the concluding words of a
Utah obituary notice.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

A country editor, describing the
bonnets now in fashion, said
"Theyhave adownward slant that
reminds one of vicious cow with
a board across her eyes"
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

1t was, of course, an Irishman
who said, sthe most eloquent fea-
ture in q dogs face was its tail =
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

ode resolution am passed Grim
con" was the decision of a negro
chairman at Richmond.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The Illinois girl who lately lost
her speech, save whispering, has
had forty offers of marriage.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

A single county in Ohio yields
100000 bushels Of wheat, valued
at 81, 100000.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Gen. Sickles has been promoted
for gallant services-ssnce the war.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Gen. Sherman has returned
from the plains without a "scalp."
Ed.
He returned with one more than
a merciful Providence should have
permitted.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

Frogs are fifteen cents per dozen
in Cincinnati.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The parson gave in and left.
Fayetteville observer. [volume] (Fayetteville, Tenn.) 1850-1966, 1867-09-12

The ostlers were alarmed and
came rushing in, when an expla-
nation ensued, and the puppy that
had caused so great agitation was
found Jim. and Bill got sober at
length, and they haven't been on
a spree since.
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1867-03-22
BRIDGE AT DUBCQCE.

When the Dubuquers found that a
consolidation was really like to come
about between the Illinois Contra! and
the Dubuque and Sioux City railroad,
they all st once walked up TO their wont.
cd narrowness OF view, and their old
fear OF too quick transit made through
Dubuque without chance for stoppags
AMI plumber there. So their Produce
Exchange got together, ard resolved
against the consolidation. This has
knocked the thing in the head. -.
Whereupon all Northern Iowa wss,
of Dubuque has arisen in indignation
ut the narrow selfish policy OF Dubuque.
Now all of sudden that benighted city
opens its eyes, and tries to stay tho cur
rent of WRATH by crying "Bridge
Bridget" LET as build Bridge u
Perhaps this new born zeal in our be-
half will allay the storm they have
raised to their hurt. Aud it may be
we'll for our citizens to help in this new
bridge movement what they can. But
IT makes no great difference to us here
and west of here. The Iowa Central
will soon be through. Then Hurral
for st. Louis and Chicago without say
Ing to Dubuque "hy your leave"
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1867-03-22

a surplus accrues of such a magnitude
as to promise to pay off its stupcndous
debt before the generation passes away
which saw 1t created. Candor must
compel us to acknowledge that this re.
suit surprises us not only in itself, but
because it runs counter to what we an
ticipated, considering the quarter in
which it is discovered. No one among
US believed that the American nation
would commence the redemption OF its
debt rs soon as the war was over, and
we had reason for our disbelief. Our
doubts were JUST fable, but the fedora.
ton has hitherto put to shame our sus-
picion, and indeed, is showing an ex-
ample which might stir up the nations
of the Old World to emulate its con-
duct.
How comes it that our prognostica.
tons have been so agrceably faisified,
and what promise is there that the fu-
ture Will correspond to the experience
OF the last twelve months? What has
happened is beyond question unique.
The receipts Of the three-quarters Of q
year, ending on the 30th of June last,
were estimated to be S305, 500, 000; they
have exceeded this sum by $685. a
revenue prospecting to degree SO far eX-
ceeding the estimate of it is in itself
matter for establishment; but the ex-
tent to which the expenditure of
the nation has been reduced
is more remarkable. The Amer
leans may probably feel more unmixed
pride in the way in which great army
has been disbanded, than to any other
circumstances which has happened since
the termination Of the war. The ex-
pcnditure has fallen short of the estim-
ates by 500, 600, 600, and it need scarce.
~ be added that the saving has been al
most entirely effected by the reduction
Of the army. We are not surprised,
therefore, at being told that from Au-
gust, 1863, to October, 1866, the debt
had been decreased by $206, 00G, 900, or
some thirty millions of pounds sterling.
VIII this last? Mr.. McCulloch does
not desire that it should. He is well
aware that the taxation of the States is
strained so high as to do more harm in
the way of REFRESHING industry than
good in the redemption of debt, and
he would reduce the internal taxes and
simplify the tariff so as to leave suf.i-
cient revenue to produce a surplus Of
'our or five millions of dollars per
month.
The Senate and the House Of Repre-
were rs well aware as Mr.
Of the oppressive nature of
the existing system of taxation: but
until the fundamental questions of re-
at issue between them
selves and the President were settled
they refused to consider any other sub
|ect. They knew, moreover, that when
ever the financial system of the Union
became the subject OF inquiry, the most
delicate questions would come on for
They were aware that it
was possible that the Republican party
itself might split upon them. Were
other reasons wanting, the dominant
party in Congress would be wise in its
generation in refusing to review It's
system until the question of
is settled.
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1867-03-22
SOUTHERN SENTIMENT.

The effect Of the new reconstruction
measures upon the minds of the South.
srDers themselves, ia looked for with
considerable interest. Much now de-
ponds for the future peace and prosperi-
~ OF our country, upon the spirit in
which the defeated seceders treat our
latest overtures. If after all their con-
tumacy, they will now accept the situa-
ton, and, reckoning discretion as the
better part Of valor, will gracefully
come to terms, and unite their counsels
harmoniously with ours,-a happy
future thereupon awaits them and us.
but If with persistent spite they spurn
our generous offers, no one can foresee
what severity of discipline must vet be
theirs. Sumner is already counseline
3 general eonfiscation; and although
this il now repealed by Fessenden,
Sherman. and our other foremost men,
yet to even this may we be driven by q
too long and naughty defiance from the
South. .aaa ..
we are happy to receive such tidings,
as the following report Of the commit
tee of the Virginia Legislature recently
sent to Washington, made on SATURDAY..
TO the Senate of that State:
Your committee acting under reso-
luton appointing them to confer with
the government at Washington as to
whether the convention proposed to be
called by the general assembly of Viz
ginia, would be considered and recor.
niscd as legal mode of holding a cor.
yeEtion under the act of Congress-
passed March I'd, 1867, have the honor
III report, that they repaired to Wash
iugtOn, and were politely and kindly
received by the authorities, and invited
by prominent members of Congress TO
make suggestions Of amendments 70
the pending resolution before Congress-
to be made supplementary to the act
aforesaid, which suggestions they made.
and If adopted will materially soften II
and make it more conciiiatory. Your
committee entertain the opinion that
the convention bill. passed by the zen
eral assembly of Virginia, so far as in
conformity with, and not in confict
viii, the set Of Congress aforesaid.
would be recognized by the authorities
AS Tending to produce the harmony.
Your committee further, il satisfied from
the interview with the authorities a,
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1867-03-22
THE NEWS,

The Atlantic Cable Company has
refused to reduce its tariff of charges.
East Tennessee has suffered to the
amount of about S2,000,000 by the re-
cent great flood.
The United States Congress has
passed n resolution excluding alcoholic
liquors fromthe Capital building. Good!
The rebs in the Louisiana Legislature
declare the new Reconstruction ac,
unconstitutional" and propose to test
it in the Supreme Court.
1t is now believed that the efforts of
the Fcnians to gain recognition as bel.
ligerents, by action of Congress or the
President, will fail.
A gentleman of Chicago, who has
been keeping a weather record for a
number OF years, says this is the cold
est March there in eight years.
A London dispatch says the Fenian
trouble in Ireland is not yet ended.
Four British gunboats have been sent
TO tile neiqbgorhood of Dublin.