The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1867-05-17
Pleasing Miscellany.


1t was happy moment for Samuel Swell
out when the wife of his bosom pinned upon
his breast the silver star which should il di-
cate to the common people the proud position
which he occupied, as Common Councilman
of the city of Boston, and the said manly breast
expanded few inches more than usual as he
walked with firm step and head erect through
Goldfish Square, for the down town 2ar.
Lunkhead, the liquor dealer, whom sweli
out had defeated in the Ward, by ululh-
plant plurality of six, stood upon the car
platform, and was saluted by the Councilman,
in the JOY OF his heart, with an impressive
good morning" to which Lunkhead respond
ed with curt" " ar ye?
The Conductor was on the front platform
the ear began TO move, when q greasy lflHli1
woman struggled on to the PLATFORM aud,
swinging her heavy market basket against
the nit ofSwallouts stomach, inquired, m
Does this caF-r-r go to Elliot Shtrate
ssIr does pass there Madame" responded the
Councilman with as much dignity as lnan
suddenly deprived of his breath. couii aSsuh,e
"Shtop there for me, thin, said the daugh
tor OF Erin throwing the remark seasoned with a
strong boouet of rum and onions, well into has
face
Swellout attempted to gasp something, when
a ragged urchin who leaped upon tho car
damned a filthy bit of currency and a greasy
copper into his palm, calculating, there yer
stamps, old Beeswax," and disappeared before
he could articulate.
Lunkhead grinned and Swelout began 10
feel hot, when he discerned da1ntlly dressed
female making the usual frantic Signs OF dls-
tress, with which the sex generaliy Indicate
their desire TO arrest the progress Of horse
car. With his accustomed politeness, Swell
out rang the bell, and stepping OIL assisted the
lady on 10 the car Without the least acknoWl-
edgement of his courtesy, she ratified the closed
door, and, turning to him with a frown, ask
ed
"WiU YOU open this door?"
He did open it, but we regret to say, closed
il with STAN.
Here's another customer" said Iunkbead
maliciously, pulling the strap, and Swellout
became aware of portly red-taoed man, lard
ing the lean earth, in pursuit of the car, with
occasional pursy shouts and ATTEMPTS at a
whistle, which ended III tat wheezes. HOSTING
himself up to the platform and depositing 205
lbs avolrdupois on Swellout's pet corn, he
turned red, irate face, like flame from a
biow-pipe, on that now thoroughly bewildered
individual, and demanded
Why the d. didn't you stop the car, sir?'
I'll report you at the office"
stop the carl" roared Swelout. performipo
dance of agony one loot "Do you take nus
for horse-car conductor" m .fus
W course do. If You arn't why don't you
take off your badge?"
Ihe newly made Councilman glanced down
at his coat, and the truth flushed upon him
his fond wife had fastened his civic badge up
on the outside OF his coat, and for ten minutes
he had been acting as an involuntary servant
of the Metropolitan Railway Company. Hast
lily paying his fare with the newsboys money
which ne still held IN his hand, he lnnped from
the car, and with the "hawi hawi' OF his de-
tested political rival ringing i'll his ear, tore
the proud emblem OF distinction from his
breast, and a piece of his coat with it, and
walked slowly down town, like common man
instead OF a Common Councilman.--Co inneT-
ciai Bulletin.