Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1867-04-06
A Case of Conscience.


OF crinlnals,.as well as in connection with 9TH
or trials, having frequently, through his skill,
AIDED the most hardened criminals to escape
from justice. Some time ago, while ou,
friend was attending court in an adjoining
county, he was applied to by singular sncci
men OF humanity charged with grand larceny,
to defend him. The lawyer very naturally
inquired what crime he vas accused Of The
party he accused replied that somebody had
been mean enough to charge him with steal.
my 81, $40 in bank notes, and had got him in
dictcd.
Are you suilty?" asked the lawyer
"Ihats none of your business" replied
the accused. They say that makes no diff
ference with you, whether a man is guilty or
not you will contrivc to dig him out in some
way. So don't talk any more about guilt till
you hear what the jury says"
T" we'll what about the pay p said the law
yer.
." You just hold on till the trial is over;
give l---tthc complainant fits on tho cross
examination, aud that other fellow he has got
to back him up, and you'll have no trouble
about the pay"
The trial commenced and proved to be II
somewhat protmctcd and exciting one. The
District Attorney proved that the money in
question Was composed Of two $40, bills, on a
certain bank, and the remainder all in $40
bills, all Of which were wrapped in piece of
oil silk. The jury. after listening to tie cu,ln-
sci IN the ease, and receiving the charge of
the Judge, retired, and soon returned with a
verdict of not guilty. The accused, who was
greatly clatcd with the result of the trial and
effort ot his counsel, invited the latter into
oc of the vacant Jury rooms As soon as
they were alone lie slapped lis counsel on the
shoulder, and exclaimed :
Free as water, ain't / I? What's the use
OF trying man for stealing when you're
around? Now | suppose you want pay p
Yes; have you gotanything to pay WITH"
said the Lawyer
Lend me your knife and We sec ahou,
that"
The lawyer, slightly startled at such prop
oSition, rather reluctantly complied. The ac-
cuscd immediately commenced ripping and
cutting away at the waistband of his r,nta.
looms, and soon produced the roll of bills for
the stealing Of which he had Just been tried,
wrapped up in the identical piece of oil silk
described by the witnesses for the prosecution,
and throwing it on the table before the aston
ishcd lawyer, exclaimed : "Thcre take your
pay out Of that guess there is enough to
pay. yon tolcrably we'll"
Why yon william you stole that money
after all, /" said the lawyer. 6. Do you expect
can take any of that money!"
"Stolc that money Why; what arc YOU
talking about? Didn't them twelve men ND
stairs there Just say didn't steal it? What's
the use of you trying to raise question of
conscience after twelve respectable mcn have
given their ol'inion on the subject? Take
yonrpay out of that and ask no questions.
Don't be modest in taking; | got it easy
enough, and you have worked hard enough
Tor it,"
Our informant did not state how much the
lawyer took, but we presume the chap didn't
have much change left after our friend had
satisfied hi conscience" in the premises.
Eccentric DIvINE-'The Reverend Zcb
lwitchcl was the most noted Methodist preach
er in Vermont for snrewd aud lau~hablc say
ings. In the pulpit he maintained suitable
gravity of ma!ner and expression, but out OF
the pulpit he overfowed with fun Occasional
~ he would, if emergency seemed to require,
intr 'duce something queer in ser,uon for the
sake Of arousing the tagging attention of his
hearers. Seeing that his audience was got.
ting sleepy, he paused in his discourse, and
iscoursed as follows:
Brethren, you haven't any idea of the
sufrrings Of our missionaries in the new set.
Elements OH account Of tho mosquitoes. The
mosquitoes in some of these regions are enor-
nous A great many Of them would weigh
n pound, and they will get on logs and bark
when the missionaries are going along"
BY this time all ears aud eyes were open,
and he proceeded to finish his discourse.
The next day one of his hearers called him
to account for telling lies in the pulpit
"Thcre never was mosquito that weighed
pound" he said
"But ddn'tsay one Of thcm would weigh
pound; | said great many, and think
million Of them would"
I" But you snid they barked at the mission
aries"
"No, no, brother; said they would get ou
logs and bark"
ErERNIrY.-" Eternity has no gray hairs p
The Flowers fade, the heart withers, man
grows old and dies; the world lies down in the
scpulchre Of ages, but time writes no wrinkles
on the brow Of eternity. Eternity Stupcn.
dous thought: The ever present, unborn un.