The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1867-08-09
From the La Crosse Democrat
DESCRIPTION OF THE GAME OF BASE
BALL.

those optics and tell us tales of sympa-
thy. And look at that Mount Tom on
our right cheek bone. Base ball! That
is the row.
1t came about thus. Sedentary en-
ployment is too irksome for the sys-
tenn. The Doctor said we needed ex-
ercise. Doctor knows. He told us to
join base ball we joined. Bought a
book of instructions, and for five days
studied it wisely, if not too well. Then
we bought sugar scoop cap, red
belt, green shirt, yellow trousers,
pumpkin colored shoes, a paper collar,
and purple neck-tie, and, with a lot of
other delegates, moved gently to the
ground.
There were two mines. These mines
were antagonists. The ball is "a pretty
little drop of softness, the size of a
goose egg, and five degrees harder than
brick. The two mines play against
each other. 1t is quiet game, much
like chess, only little more chase than
chess.
There was an umpire. His position
is a hard one. He sits on a box, and
yells ''fowl."
| took the bat. 1t is a murderous
plaything, descended from Pocahontas
to the head of John Smith. The man
in front Of me was pitcher. He was
a nice pitcher, but he sent the balls hot
The man behind was a pitcher. He
caught it, too!
The umpire said "play." Itis the
most radical play know OF, this base
ball. Saving cord wood is moonlight
rambles beside base ball. So the pitch
er sent a ball toward me. 1t looked
pretty coming; so let it come. Then
he sent another. | hit it with the club,
and hove it gently upward. Then l
started to walk to the first base. The
ball lit in the pitcher, or his hands, and
somebody said he caught fly. Alas,
poor fly l walked leisurely toward
the base. Another man took the bat
[ turned to see how he was making it,
and mule kicked me on the cheek.
The man said it was the ball. 1t felt
like mule, and Ireposed on the grass.
The ball went on!
Pretty soon there were two moref flies,
and three of us flew out. Then the
other nine came in, and us zine went
out. This was better. Just as / was
standing on my dignity in the left field,
a hot ball, as they called it, came sky
rocketing toward me. My captain yell
ed, "Take it,"
1 hastened gently forward to where
the ball was aiming to descend. [ have
good eye to measure distance, and
saw at glance where the @rolite was
to light. [ put up my hands. How
sweetly the ball descended. Every
body looked feltsomething warm in
my eye! "Muffinp' yelled ninety fel-
lers. '"Muffin' be id! It's a
cannon ballw For three days Pve
had two pounds of raw beef on that
eye, and yet it paineth!
Then | wanted to go home, but my
gentle captain said "nay." So l mayed
and stayed. Pretty soon it was my
strike. "Brick to bat !" yelled the UNI
pire. 1 went, but not all serene, as was
my wont. The pitcher sent in one hip
high. / missed it. He sent in another
neck high. 1t struck me in the gullet.
"Fowl," yelled the umpire. He sent
in the ball again. This time / took it
square and sent it down the right field,
through parlOr WindOW-a kerosene
lamp, and rip up against the head ofan
infant who squietly taking its-nap
in his or it's mothers arms.-Then
slung the bat and meandered forth to
the first base. | heard high words and
looked. When [ slung the bat | had
with it broken the jaw of the umpire,
and was fined ten cents.
The game went on. | liked it. 1t
is so much fun to run from base to base
just in time to be put out, or to chase a
ball three-fourths of mile down hill
while all the spectators yell "muffin ~
"go it," "hOme runw ''go round
again I" or ego round dozen times"
Base ball is sweet little game. When
it came my turn to bat again, l noticed
everybody moved back about ten rods!
The new umpire retreated twelve rods.
He was timid! The pitcher sent 'em in
hot. Hot balls in time of war are
good. But | don't like 'em too hot for
1un. After a while | got fair clip at
it, and you bet it went, cutting the
daisies down the right field. A fat man
and his dog sat in the shade of an oak |
enjoying the game. The ball broke
one leg of the dog, and landed like
runaway engine in the corporosity OF
the fat man. He was taken home to
die.
Then I went on double-quick to the
field, and tried to stop a hot ball. 1t
came toward me from the bat at the
rate Of nine miles minute. L put up
my hands, the ball went sWeetly sing
ing on its way with all the skin from
my palms with it.
More raw beef!
That was an eventful chap who tirSt
invented base ball. It's such fun. I've
played five games, and this is the glow