New-York tribune., 1867-10-02

a-changin' all the time il woud be pity il smart
girl couldn't always go looking like lady. The
main thing for sorvantsif people would call em by
that ojus name-was for to look much like ladies
possible; and the only way to look like lady
was to dress like one Thank Heaven, what with
California diamonds and imitation lace, it was get
ting easier and easier to be lady, and she really
didn't why people need be troubled at the fash
ions being all French
Mrs. -, a respectable looking lady from Massa-
chusetts sad that for her part, she never had any
trouble with her own dress, for she wore exactly
what she could afford. and what suited her; and if
she followed the fashion at ALL followed it as it was
going off and not rs it was coming in. She had only
a few plain rules, which, however. she followed
pretty vigorously. She always dressed to suit her
work. and didn't put OH her silk gown when she was
going into her kitchen, which she did, by the way,
every day, and superntended or made some OF the
dishes. She wore long dresses In the street,
but she never wore them any shorter than was ne
ceSsary to clear the mud. She hadn't very slender
pair of ankles and if she had, she didn't know that
she cared to have strangers them. Then. she
never wore false hair, and never meant to. If she
grew as gray as badger. and she only wore jcwelry
when she went to party; and as for her figure II 1t
didn't suit her friends God made it, she certainly
didn't mean TO mend it with paddings nor stays.
the Evil One. Her own dress, then never gave her
any trouble but her daughters were getting to be
real cross to her. They were plain girls. and some
people might call them homcly, but the way they
would fix themselves up enough to make any
mother with ordinary vanity quite distracted. They
irOad wear ChignOns, and short dresses and little
hats, and they made themselves so ridiculous that
their own brothers were ashamed TO be seen with
them. They could never bear to be argued with
about their dressing, but shut her up continually by
telling her they dressed exactly like the Empress En-
genie. Who was Eugonie, she would like to know,
that good healthy. American girls, with plain fathers
and mothers must copy her way of rigging herself
upi She thought herself ~ good as an Empress any
day. and if the girls must copy queens and people Of
that sort, why don't they follow that good woman
Queen Victoria who dressed just plain IS ever she
could; and whom she had herself. driving
in little carriage in Windsor Park. i'll plain straw
bonnet, and gray silk gown. and black mantilla,
looking no more like queen than she did herself
Here Mrs. - began to get quite angry, and thumpcd
on the table with her parasO so hard that she broke
the end of IT off, and that made her still angrier so
that she sat down quite red i'll the face.
At this moment much to the confusion of some of
the company. no less q person than Miss "A Is
Mn took the stand, and, throwing of the large
mantle i'll which she was envelOped revealed that
touching and simple costume in which she has made
MaZeppa famous, and In which she took captive the
heart of the elder Dumas No sooner did she catch
sight of it than the lady from Massachusetts marched
Indignantly TO tho door, and withdrew from the
apartment with looks of withering indignation. Miss
- however. nothing daunted lit would have been
odd indeed to see her daunted y Immediately began
to address the meeting, calling the audience sis
tcrs," at which there was great comnotion, and
I.,fA Al,a
quietly reduced matters to order by taxing from the
pocket of her pantaloOns very pretty little revolver
with whose bediamondcd handle she played in very
suggestive way. She then proceeded to declare her
opinion that the of ncatneSs. chcapneSs,
and Americanism. there no dress superior to the
one she then 1t requires, she said false al
lurements, and, indeed. gives opportunity for none.
bracelet or two an ankle ring. collar-tneSe were
all the ornaments that were necessary and, as gen
eral thing she could dispense with even these. The
actual amount of stuff required for what there was OF
dress could not, by any extravaganza of ingenuity
be made to exceed threequarters of yard, and even
that she often found as much again as was ncces-
sary OF course the attractveness of this dress de
pended good deal there the speaker bridled archly
upon the figure of the wearer and since that figure
whatever it might be- could not he disgraced IN such
costume it was not to he expected that everybody
had been universally admired. and her appearance in
it had given such impetus to the legitimate drama
in New-YOrk and Paris IA had not been seen since
the days of Mrs. SiddOns Whatever might be SAID
against this dress, 10 could not be charged with
being an imitation of French fashions nor of the
Empress. She had often seen that estmahe lady,
and had never seen her wearing costume i'll any
way resembling this. The Empress had been very
much pleased with it, and had suggested that 50 pO
etcal an invention ought to be rewarded by the or
der OF the Bath. Miss - talked good deal moro
about the merits of her dress and proposed that
the ladies Of the house should send to the nnr-
sery for rockinghOrse (she had left hers at the
thcater in order that she might show its advantage
for equestrian amusement. But this proposition
met with serious opposition from the greater part of
the company and, indeed. the whole meeting itself
was brought TO an untmely end by the mischief of
O young lady who was so struck with envy at the
size Of Miss IS calves she stood on the table,
that she stuck her shawl-p IN them. one after
another, to SEQ if they would not collapse. IL
happened however, that there was deception in
this case and the fair owner Of these pOrtentous
beauties was put into such agony of rage by the
pain that she discharged her indiscrimnate
ly right and left. and then drawing a large knife
from her girdle she flew at the offender and scalped
her the spot holding up her cngnon in triumph
and with yell that served for cue, the curtain fell
on this melancholy failure to bring about united ac-
ton OH the part Of New-York ladies with reference
10 the tyranny of fashion.
AMERICAN FALL OPENINGS.
The golden rod is on the hillsides. The