Ashtabula weekly telegraph. [volume] (Ashtabula, Ohio) 1853-1873, 1867-08-10
1AsHTABULA, OHIO, SATURDAY, AUGUST 10, 1867.

IIeWs Vi GndI uIgle local Item reached me
1 had a. long train of ammunition and sup
ply wagons stuck in the muddy cypress
swamp in'the Cotton States, and the next
thing remember was out in an 1 open
field, a mile from the stock mule train, in
a crowd of lunatics, all of US SO hoarse
that we could hardly whisper how glad
we were we didn't die the day before. J
Doctor, oh, Doctor what IS the mat
ter? Are there any symptoms of trea-
son in my case?
1t is said that war, like poverty, makes
strange Ebed-fellows, and am tainted
with being in bed with that internal Thad.
Stevens. Suppose get out of that bed
and crawl over into that other bed
leave the Internal Thad to crawl into bed
with afnest of internal copperheads-
Vallandigham, Thurman, Olds & Co.
What brilliant change. - H ~ saa % H.
Excuse me, gentleman, if / 90 back to
internal Thad, for would rather be IN
te17aally right than Internally acrong.
| Thad. Stevens is some distance from
the main army, on picket or vidette line
watching the movements of the enemy
from near stand point, and a restless
ugly customer to skirmish with he is, but
when the main battle comes on he falls
back and takes his place in the line, and
we overlook the gyrations ard tantrums
he cuts when alone and far from us. We
may yet be made to adopt his dreadful
measures. live do, the South may thank
themselves for it. They have made US
doa great.many things dreadfully against
our wishes. They made us take arms.
They made us quit guarding their proper
ty and destroy it. They made us send
Sherman through the South without
gloves. They made us call colored sol
diers to the field to help save the country,
and 100000 came at the call. They
made us free the slaves, and when We
gave them easy terms by which to re-
cover their forfeited rights, by. obstinacy
and insolence they made us take another
step, aud that step was forward not back
ward as they hoped. Refusing. to give
freedmen their rights and protect loyal
lives, they made US do it. Their obstina-
cy made us give them the Freedmen's
Bureau and the Civil Rights Bill They
made us give them loyal Governors, May
ors and Judges in place of traitors. Press
ing right on in this way they at length
made US give the vote to their former
slaves. wonder how they like it as far
as they have got. ,,..- .-.-... "a. ...
The next step, if they will make us
take it, will make such tracks as old
Thad's right foot always makes, sbroad
as it is long" If necessary we shall take
that step, for We shall strap them down
and buckle them snugly until they work
kindly in loyal harness. Cavalry Sheri-
dan is on the ground and is good hand
at breaking colts. l have seen him in
the, South followed by 10000 horse in
faultless discipline: And if-mark me-
if our modern Moses removes him, the
people in IS will rush him into the Presi-
Dental Mansion at such a rapid rate that
his coat tail wouldn't overtake him in
three days. You may turn a leaf down
there to mark that particular place in
history. ~. .-. -,,..., t-,,-. ,...e ..st I'D. ..
But says one to me, "Gray why do you
leave the old Democratic platform ?" T
Let us look at the planks in those old
platforms on which we so lazily foated,
till we foated into sea of blood. t.-a
The Wing plank 0gaiast the agitation
of slavery, and the Democratic plank OPP
posed to the agitation of slavery. If, for
the sake of Aud Lang Syne, we are
to fight on planks rated out of Commo-
dore Noah's ark, lets have the first bout
on these twin planks. Where is the -sla-
very plank for or against Floated out
of all platforms and off to sea, and learn
it has washed ashore on the coast of Bra
zil --,.-ll,s..5 -i.t %; ..5zr fs ...s
My right foot was always nailed to the
war plank which was purely democratic
and in no other platform. Now it L had
kept my foot on the slavery plank till
this time, l should have ruined my pants.
The first shell from rebel gun knocked
the low tariff planks, State or. National
Bank planks, and the planks on the dis
tribution of the surplus funds in the treas
ury, into the middle of the next century,
When we come up with those planks, if l
am about, will get on again. The fu-
gitive slave planks l shall never again
see, for the war has knocked them into a
place not polite to mention, and now my
democratic friends, seriously, if you are
bound to stick to that plank / advise you
to take. along palm-leaf fan, for it is
very warm down there. The war plank,
solitary and alone, is LETT of all the, demo
cratic OF any other anti-sesesh date. We
Democrats used to oexpress ourselves on
that plank about as follows: 81 was for
the last war, am for this war, and you
may put me down for the next war. -
Who is on that plank now? On this
purely democratic and only, living old
democratic plank proudly stood and no
bly died the lamented Douglas, and you
will find still standing proudly on it, Tod,
and Logan and Sickles and Dix and Sher-
idan and Thomas and host of others
who have the same disease / have, and
revcrently thank God the hospital is full
of such and DIR. Thurman can never dis
charge the patients 2. ,-z,r.. -. -...s,-
Now word on that piece of political
India rubber of African descent, what
the Johnnies used to call smoked Yam
KEGS. 1t is singular what an. effect vote
in ones hand has on a neighbor's respect.
Foreigners, before they can vote here are
often called ''fannel mouthed paddles,
or 'tlop-eared dutch,''' but when they hold
a vote, we discover that "rich.. Irish brogue
and sweet German accent. " So a
vote Las converted "nigger" into "our
colored fellow citizen " Strange meta
morphosis which the south compelled us
: