The Bolivar bulletin. [volume] (Bolivar, Hardeman County, Tenn.) 1865-1888, 1867-10-05
A Young Lady with a Rat Under
Her Skirt

A short time since the wife and family of
q New y YOrk merchant returned from Eu-
rope, bringing with them young German
lady, who came
"Far, far across the sea"
90 visit some relatives living in New York
The moment the steamer was autographed as
being hsloW, Mr.. L--, the merchant, left
his store, and drove to the pier, anxiously
awaiting the moment when
''Two souls, with but a single thought,
Tive hearts that beat as ons,"
would be gladly reunited in a loving embrace.
The minutes seemed hours, but at length
the steamer came. Mr.. Ii, in an ecstacy
Of delight, embraced and kissed his wife and
children, and welcoming Miss Lena-the
7oung lady, drove them home.
Happiness reigued throughout the house
hold. The day was passed IN romping with
the children-thOse dear little ones who had
been absent so long-in listening to stories
of Journeys through Germany and Switzer-
land, and in bantering Miss Lena with haE-
ing come so far away from home, not to
visit her relatives, but to secure husband
In foreign cline. Dinner was announced.
Away scampered the children, and Mrs. L.
and Mr.. L. and Miss Lena brought up the
rear. The dining room was reached, and
the happy family were about seating them
tance was heard. Each listened to the de-
liciOus strains, which,
Like music Ger the sweet south,
Breathes upon bank Of violets,
Stealing and giving odors'
the house Away, out to the
front door, ran the children in joyful glee, |
and, after them, Mrs. L. 4" How de- |
lightful What can it be inquired Miss
Lena. Some regiment returning from
parade, responded Mr.. L. seating him |
self quietly to discuss the elegant dinner he !
had ordered to be prepared. Just then-O, |
horror Miss Lena, with a look of unutter-
able misery and alarm, clasped her skirts /
and gave forth terrible scream. "Good /
heaFensI What has happened ?" exclaimed /
MIR. L., rushing frantically beside her /
There's something running up my skirts % i
she gasped, cIasping the aforesaid skirts still /
tighter. " Something running up your /
skirts What can it be? and dropping /
upon one knee, encircEng Miss Lena Is waist |
with one arm, Mr. L. commenced cautiously, !
TO feel under her skirts for the terrible |
something. "Oh'l Mr. L. ! Mr.. L.. What |
shall / do 2 screamed Miss Lena. "Be |
quiet, don't get frightened, said Mr. L.,
when the door opened and Mrs L. appeared. |
What a situation Mr.. l. upon his knee, /
lne arm about Miss Lena waist the other /
where under her skirts Mrs. L. stood for /
4 moment transfxed with Indignation; then /
throwing herself into a chair Wept bitter 4
ears of shame, saying, 90, George / !
George / never could have believed this /
Of you-never T.
Mr.. L. tried to explain. Mrs. l.. would |
not listen. Miss Lena, conscious of her in |
locence, bat realizing the awfulness of the
position In which she had been placed, be-
gan to weep as well as scream, when Mrs /
Z. feeling she had been cruelty deceived, |
rushed aDgrily toward her, evidently with |
5he intention of doing her bodily harm,
when a large rat ran from beneath Miss |
Lena's clothes. Such q time as there was
.henl Mrs. L., folding her dress about her I
FORM jumped upon chair. Miss Lena
tainted outright, and Mr. l., seizing the /
poker, commenced with his ratship a race
FOR life. Up and down the room, here, there, |
everywhere, ran the rat followed closely by |
Mr. L. At length o, 'twasa sorry sight
with one fell swoop the cause of this ter
rible mishap was defunct
Mrs. L. could scarcely forgive herself for /
her dear George. Miss Lena was |
restored to consciousness, kissed Mrs. L. a |
dozen times, and finally acknowledged the |
position was rather a strange one for a mar
ried man. But Mr.. L., after having placed |
HOrs de combat his ratship, restored tran
guilty and laughed good naturedly at the
jealousy of his wife, resolved within himself |
that the next time he hunts for rats under a
a young lady's skirt, it viii be away from
home.