The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1867-04-10

or the Venture.
Posr OFFIs, CoNFEDRIr Y ROADS
witch is in the Stait NV Kentucky,)
March 2s, 1867.
Ihev had many sudden and rather
'strordinary changes in politiX-some
SO very sudden that the movement per-
doost CONGESTION nv the conscience. /
rekollect wunst nv adYocatin free trade
and high protective tariff, all within
twelve hours, Il made a speech in a
agIicultooral deestrik nv New York in
the forenoon a. 10 4. NJ, and in man.
ufacturin' town in Pennsylvany in the
evenin, our platform bein SO construk-
It'd both sides could a endorse
ment in ip and hev performed many
other feats nv moral gymnastics; but
this last change hev bin called upon
TO make is probably the suddenest.
Last week, Toosday, Deekin P9gram,
Captain McPelter and was engaged
in riddin the Corners nv niggers. We
he'd endoored em ez long ez we thot
possible, and determined on standin It
no longer. Selectin three wich we wuz
satisfied he'd too much spellln book in
to em to be enslaved agin, we wuZ pre-
parin notises to be served onto EN-, or
derin em to leave in twenty-four hours,
when reserved in the Northern mail a
letter marked "Free-AleX. W. Ran
dell, p. NJ. g." Iknowti 1t wuz offishul
to wunst-that blessid signatoor is on
my commisshun, and I've contemplated
it too often to be mistaken init. Its
contents wuz brief, and run thus:
Ito all Postmasters in the Southern
States: The niggers evxotes-consilia-
shen is our best holt. See to it.''
This breef tho not hard to be under
stood order wuz sealed with the offishel
seal NV the Post Offs Department
stampt into putty instid nv wax, to-wit:
loaf of bread, under roll nv butter,
4, IL .E,E.g T
pretended the situation tsite, and set
about doin my dooty with both Roman
and Spartan tirmness. "Deekin," sez
/, tearin up the notises, "these niggers
we hev misunderstood They are not
a inferior race-they are not descend
ants Nv Ham and -Hager-it wuzn't
Pau1's idea in sendin back Onesimus to
condemn him to servitood-we heV mis-
understood the situation, and must
make amends. The nigger is devoid
NV smell and is trooly a man and a
brotherl"
"wat2" said the Deekin, tippin back
in amazemeut.
"Jest wat say" sez ], 'Eread that, {"
and flung him the letter.
The upshot NV the confer ence wich
follered wuz the calling uv-a meeting
the next mite, at which all the Ethio-
plans NV the Corners wuz invited and
urged TO be present. -l--.-...-. =
The trouble wuz,to git the niggers to
attend the meetin. The fust one spoke
10 lafft in my face, and asked me how
long 1t wuz sence I he'd helpt hang a
couple Nv niggers, by way-uy fnishin
off a celebrashen. Pollock, the Illinois
storekeeper, got hold nv 1t, and told
Joe BigleT, and Joe swore that eff the
niggers hedn't any more sense than we
give em credit for, in sposin we Good
bamboozle em so cheep, he shood go
back to the old beleef, to-wit: that they
wuz only a sooperior race nv monkeys,
after all; and by mite every nigger in
the vicinity wuz pOstid thoroughly,
and out Nv all NV em Good only Git
TOUR who would promise to attend,
and them the Deekin he'd to pay 50
apiece to. To give it eclaw promised
one Nv EN- 50 Ito be paid at the close NV
the meetin to sit on the stand with me,
wich, bein avery poor man, and hevin
a sick wife in shanty near by, who
wuz suterin for medicine, (Which he
coodentgit without money, )he accepted.
at this pint an idee struck me. re-
membered Philadelfy, and determined
to hev scene rivalin the Couch and
Orr biznis. "Another thing, Cuff, un-
derstand that it's part NV the bargain
thaIwhen in my speech 1 turn to VOC
and stomp, you must rise and embrace
me-"
"wat Pr sez he.
Fall into my arms, lovin-like-you
understandable as tho we wuz long,
long lost brothersw
''Scuse mel" sed he. "I'se a mity
low nigger, and wants 10 buy de old
woman some quinine, and wood do
mos anything foah dat, but, golly, dat's
too much ~ -ce-H
Mot cent, !" sed sternly, assoomin
my most piercinest gaze, "onless this Is
included ~
"Well," returned he, sulkny, "ef I
I aoly
The mite arrived and the meetin-
house wuz full. We thot fust NV hold
ing il in the chapel NV the College, but
give up the idea ez impractica6Ie, ez
OWN to the dillytorinis nv our North
ern friends in forwardin sich subscrip-
shens ez they hev raised, we heven't got
no further with the bildin than lawn
the corner-stun. In the front wuz the
four niggers, all in clean shirts, and on
the stand WIZ the nigger he'd engaged.
Over the platform, wuz the follerin
notices:
I'm Yoonion ther is strength-For
President in 1868, Fernando Wood; For
Vice President, Fredrick Du uglis.1 NJ s :.
"1n the niger, strength In the Cau-
cashen, beauty-In the mulatter, who
is trooly the noblest NV the human
species-both."'
In addlshen to these, we dug mn all
the old notices wich jefferson writ.
y IL
hedn't bin quoted in Kentucky for
twenty years, and postid em up; in
brief, he'd Wendell Phillips blessid
sperit bin a hoverin over that meetin-
house. it wood hev smiled approvinIy.
spoke to em elokentiy on the YoOni-
versel brotherhood nv mankind, holdin
that whatever else Good be said, Adam
wuz the father nv all mankind, and
that the only difference between a white
man and nigger WIZ, the niggRr Hvuz
sun burnt. The nigger, 1 Iremarkt, wuZ,
undoubtedly, originally white, but hev-
in bin, sence his arrival in this country,
addicted to agTicultoOral persoOts, he
he'd become tanned to a degree wich,
tho it marred his physical beauty, did
not interfere with his steFIin goodnis
nv heart Their he'd bin differences be
tween the races-at times ther he'd bin
onpleasantnlses wich no one regretted
more than ]. The whites nv the Cor
ners he'd not alluz bin ez considrit ez
Good hev wished. They he'd hoged
sevral nv em, and hung many more,
and in times past he'd held em in slave
~ and sich, but that shood not be thot
Nv at this happy time. II WIZ consti-
tooshnel to do these things then. and
Kentucky Wuz eminently law -abidIn
State. "Here, sez /, sson this platform,
with the flag nv our common country
over me, declare eternal friendship to
the colored man, and to seel the declar-
ashen I thus embrace"
The obstinit niggersdld'nt stir step.
"Come up and ding yoor arms around
me yoo black cuss." sed in a stage
whisper, "Come up.n
"No yoo don't, boss, " sed the nigger,
in a loud voice which was audible to
all over the church, and holdin ont his
hand. 81 can't trust you breSsid
minnit. Glib me de S5fust. YOo owe
dis child foaha dollars now foi sawin
wood fo' yoah post offs, and ef we's IL