The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1867-04-03

passion, and we are drawn after them
with gentle compulsion, as flame is
drawn to -Blackirood's Magazine.
EacetIcas Lesfcrs-A Bcrks Coansy
Postmaster and Ills Opinions
The following letter was received
short time since by the Postmaster al
Host P. O., Berlss county, Pa, from a
Commercial Agency in q Northern ci'!'
DEAR SIR:-Will you be SO kind Us ~
Give me the names Of the business con,
Germs in YOUR place, with the kind Oh
business they carry on, on the Dach Oh
this! -,
Ifyou will do me this favor l VIII
most eReerfally serve you fere, when
ever YOU may find it convenient to call
mon me. Very respectfully yours,
Host P. O., Berks Co., Pa.
To whick the facetious P. NJ. gave the
answer:
DEAR SIR:-I accidentally came across
your request at late date. We have
no business concerns in our neighbor-
hood, we live in the country; are all
farmers or independent sqaires; we all
have lots of money, and don't think
business, just now, healthy ayocation'
We are all good church members, with
not particle of puritan faith; say our
prayers before going to bed, j. e., II we
are not out too late playing poker
which is only occasional, always Tor
pastime, and never for the purpose OF
accommodating money.
Our political faith is in opposition
alike to Yankee or Southern secession.
We believe in God and hate the devil
in any shape or form. We think the
Bible and the Constitution, as our fore
fathers made them, about the two best
books in existence. We revere the wis
dom and purity of onr good and great
men of all parties and all sections, and
hate and despise the charlatans, North
or South, East or West, who seek TO de-
stroy our Government for self aggran-
dizement.. We love ourselves more
than we do the negroes. Yet the love
we have for them is sincere. If they
pass our way We give them food, shelter
and raiment, provided they don't steal,
lie, want to vote, or marry our daugh-
ters. We all think Artemus Ward
greater Snowman than Barnum, and his
"wax figures the greatest liriHg curlos-
ity in the world. We think George
Francis Train the greatest train we ever
saw without engine, tender or cow
catcher. We believe Thad. Stevens
and Morrissey to be fair representatives
of the next Congress-one being re-
formed gambler, the other practical
We don't believe i'll your
lotteries, gift enterprises, Soldier Home
charities, picture gallery distributions,
&c. They are generally intended for
the benefit of the "getter up" VINO is
always sure TO build II brOwn-stOne
palace after the thing is over. 1t is
true we ourselves indulge sometimes i'll
poker, seven-up, euchre, SC; bnt those
are square games. We fear the Lord,
and do not wish brown stone palace
built on sand. We do not steal nor rob.
We think "coal oil" a good illumination,
but dcspise it as fertilizer for sol,
brain or pocket. We have large horses,
with big tails and long names, and
think they can go about as fast as any
of your clipped" city nags. We think
we have about the best whisky in the
country, /. e. We can drink it with n
clear conscience, for VIC kaoU the tax
has been paid on it. Our principle is to
support the Government with deeds, not
with "gas."
Finally, we have a rich farming coun-
try. lots of limestone, little gold in the
soil, but plenty in our pockets; raise
lots of cereals Ono pumpkins, we are CD
posed TO them, they are of Puritan orr
igin. have fine cows, land make good
butter. Our hams are real, and we use
no horse-hesh in making sausages.
Our cocks can crow rs loud as anybody's,
our turkeys weigh twenty-five pounds
each about Christmas time, our babies
are all cheerful and healthy, our wo-
men are all pretty, and when we die we
all expect to go to Heaven.
myself am in the mercantile bust
ness, not for gain, merely for the ac-
commodation of the neighborhOod. Al
bert Yost is wooden manufacturer,
which he carries on under the same he
novolent principles. There are no 9TH
er business men who use our p. o. adj
dress. Trusting my information will
prove satisfactory, although at late
date. l remain yours, with much re-
spect. J"B S-R.
Unknown Telcgrnphy.