The Conservative. (M'connelsville, Ohio) 1866-1871, 1867-12-26
-A nomarkabIc -Adventure.

zine tolOWlbR story - Tethbeu Win
A circumstautiality which is we'll CAL
eulated to impress certain class Of
readers with a conviction of its truth
was travelling in Africa. Gays the
hero. and one morning armed with my
gun, I entered the forest, thinking 10
shoot some game for breakfast. 4t
Suddenly beheld an elephant APP
and 20 terrified was l by
tho sight that 1 dropped my gun and
stood transfxed TO the spot. While
shivering with fear, the elephant ad-
vanced rapidly and with his mouth
seized my right leg, AZ the same in
staut q fero9ious lion bounded toward
me, and did the same to left leg. Then
n tiger leaped upon the elephants back
and closes his teeth like vico npOn my
right elbow, while a vulturo simultan-
eously aligned upon my left hand, and
seized me by the wrist
just as the combined strength Of the
elephant and the lion wero exerted to
raise me from the ground, huge boa
constructor made its appearance on tho
ground before my fright. listened eyes.
aud in u moment thereafter bad coiled
atsolf about my body. H1t .f.J
Nv position was horrible, and Mt
length, came to about the most des-
perate resolution that ever entered the
mind of mani resolved to sneeze
Yes, reader, to put in motion that
wonderful magnetic influence which
runs thrc ughout all animated nature,
and binds all created things in ono
cham of mysterious sympathy
Such is sneezing.
! Its symptoms are of highly mag
netic character. A fearful convulsion,
shaking tho entire frame ike an
earthouake, darting with the speed OF
"a telegrnphic message, from the e1-
treme top of the hoso all down the
backbone, even to top OF the leet, aho'
above all, communicating such pow
erful sympathetic shock to all tho
hearers, that they are for the moment
startled, and frequently jump out OF
their seats.
Gan such an effect bo produced by
other than magnetic influences Ger
taniv not AL as came to this con-
clusion resolved 10 tesS inc eino%~s ..o ~
of this wonderful power 10 reso~- "
from my complicated dangers.
Accordingly, gathering together all
the strength that reposed in the var.
lous portions Of my elegantly carved
frame, suddenly sneezed with that
, terrific power and artistic finish for
which my family have been dist'n-
guished frcm time memorial.
The efict was iustantaneous--magi-
cal
Tho forest shook with the portentous
1 sound, violent convulsion seized every
, one of my enemies and they all loos-
. ened their hold on me simultaneously.
I. The lion fell back with chattering
: teeth. the elephant recoilcd, as ifstruck
/ by n cannon ball the tiger tell of the
: elephants back in strong cOnvulsion
/ the boa constructor shIvered so fearful
= ly as to shuttle off the mortal coil he
,, had wound Iound me; and lastly, tho
# valture futtered with a wild shrek, to
c the ground.
y All this occurred in, as near az | can
calculate, the fifteenth part of a second;
but failed not to take advantage of
o tho panic, and my various supports
Is being thus removed, ] fell to the ground
and made of with marvellous rapldity.
" breathing an inward blessing on the
70 man who first invented sneezlng.
It The consequences were just as had
r. calculated.
% Some of tho animals attempted to
follow me, as the whole Of them weIe
3 for the moment was parlyzed; and
s. when they recovered they became so
,,- mutually enraged at tho escape OF their
s. prey, that they began attacking each
10 other with great terocity.
" The vuture few at the snake, who
xt wound himself round the elephant, who
90 crushed the tiger under foot; while
xt the lion, attacking all indiscriminately
:. struck out right and left for dear hf'
- and expensive death
n Which of them frat tapped tn
es claret," and which was the last to sur
is. vive, 1t is impossible to say; but ac
nd cording to the ind dications presented o.
m the spot the next morning,the elephhn
90 mast have swallowed the vulture an
I'd, part of the boa constructor, several coil
rs. of which were twisted round the lior
NJ. and occassioned the death of that re
he gal ouadruped, who had bitten tn
ms tigars head off before departing /
ais peace. II was the most confusing cor
on; glomerat,on of anatomy that ha
ers ever witnessed
M -
nSA- A dlapldated old darkey
Montgomery, while watching II