Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1867-01-18
Looking under the Bed.

take a look under the bed before re
tiring for the night. Mrs. Evergreen
my beloved wife, INDUCES, if indul
gence it can be called, in this peculiar
practice. | do not object to it in the
least so long as she does not enforce
the performance upon myself; but
when, as is sometimes the case, she
torgets it until she has put out the
light and ensconced herself under the
comforter, then it is hard that | who
am not troubled with nervous appre
hensiveness, should have to get out in
the cold to do it for her. have of
ten remarked to Mrs. Evergreen
when [ have seen her prying under
the bed, that it was a silly habit and
that the sooner she gave it up the bet
ter. To this gentle admonition my
better halt invariably rejoins:
"La, Evergreen what harm does
it do? It's a kind Of satisfaction tc
know that nobOdy's under there, and
then | don't think of such a horrible
thing after I'm i'll bed"
Il think, my dear, you might just
as well pursue your investigations
further and look into the bureau and
the clOthes-basket. y
Evergreen" she will rejoin, "don't
mention the idea, or | shall certainly
do so. Come to think of it, a mar
could very easily get into the clothes
basket y
"Certainiy he could, my dear quite
as easily as FaIstatf. You should
certainly include the cIothes-basket
and by-the-by, there's the chimney
why not include that too?"
"NOw, Evergreen, you're laughing
at me. But | can't leave off the hab
it, and | never will. It's a comfort
for me to know there's nothing wrong
about it, and | don'tsee why you should
want to deprive me of it,"
So under the bed goes the candle
and no signs OF humanity being dis
covered there, Mrs. Evergreen is ablC
to repOse in peace. But, as already
| observed, this precautionary act i,
sometimes forgotten, and | am myself
obliged to rise, light the lamp anC
report. I've done it rather more fire
quently Of late than is agreeable. ant
have intimated as much to Mrs. (. -
She says:
VERY well, Evergreen, Ill do i
myself"
But this very procedure Is almOs
as bad, for she invariably lets the
cold in on me both in getting out anC
getting in. II it were not for iucreas
ling this mental idiosyncrasy on the
part Of Mrs. Evergreen, by giving hel
some good reason to apprehend dan
ger, | should relate to her what | an
about to lay before the reader Il
this narration, therefore, | ask thu
Ipublic to bear in mind that Mrs, Ev
ergreen is of a sensitive nature, rath
er apprehensive and slightly supersti
tious. and what | have to say mus
ander no circumstances be imparte,
to her. If for two and twenty year
(that is the period of our weddet
life, and happy years have they been
If say, have for this long perio,
refrained from imparting the matte
TO the beloved sharer Of my joys an,
partaker Of my sorrows, surely tn
public (Which, as we know alway
does keep a secret will keep mine.
All young men, | suppose, hav
love affairs before they eventually fl
their affections on the one who is t
bless their-lOt in life. | know that
J had, and don't regret it. Regret it
" far from it. Mrs. Evergreen is nc
+ present, and therefore | have no hes
tation in saying that if had my lii
J. to live over again, I'd like to 9
n through with the same sentiments
/ experience, particularly if it was
e be succeeded by again leading to Il
L hymeneal altar the present Mrs. f
/ ergreen.
e | was not bad looking when in n
e twenties. | think may 90 furthc
/ and confidently say, that "Gus Eve
t. green" was a decided fayorite amor
IS the girls of Oakville, and l really b
t, lieved that | could have had any
IS them "for the asking" AS | befol
remarked, Mrs. Evergreen was NJ
5e present, and | indulge my though
lie somewhat more freely than wou
O. otherwise be the case. | don't THU
= that | cared particularly for any {
" the OakviIle girls, however, and
S might have kept my heart whole
a this day if it had not been for t
I'd circumstance which [ am about to I
H. late.
I'd Fred Evans who had been my chu
u at school came to make me vi
III at Oakville for "a day or two" as
at said when he came but he made ii
oe week or two easily enough after | h
ne taken him about a little among t
lis "young ladies'" When that time II
ne expired, Fred said he really must {
90 as he didn't know what his father a
In mother would think of his long ;
cl- sence; but it ended in his reIievi
re their anxiety by a letter, and sendi
he for his trunks. | knew how the m
mi ter was perfectly well, and that Be
Bronson had bewitched him out OF
:, five senses. Fred tried to put it
ne to the "country air and the gu
III which was beneiitting his health,
'lle but it was no use trying to dece
ole me, and | told him so. Then he o.
Ino nc ed up frankly, and promised to h
90 him all | could, if he required ;
,lcS ,,c help in the prosecution of his suit
.ne never thought Belle firt, or t
| y she would willingly distress any