davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Plymouth weekly Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1860-1869, 1867-09-26

BrRGLARY.-The house of John Hamlet i'll
the south part of town, was entered last Mon
day night by burglars and the pocket book
OF Mr. H. containing note of hant for
500. taken from his pantaloons pocket. Be
sides this they ransaclxed the house and car
ricd of all the clothing belonging to the
family they could find No clue 20 the per
petrators Of this bold theft has been obtained.
The Plymouth weekly Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1860-1869, 1867-09-26

LEcTURE-On the organization and adj
min:stration Of Government in the United
States. The subject considered histo really,
philosophically and practically, BY c. II
Reeve, at Corbins Hall, on Thursday even
ang Oct 3D. at =. II NJ
The Plymouth weekly Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1860-1869, 1867-09-26

ATOMS. ExrREss. EXPRESS ENTREES EMPRESS
The Plymouth weekly Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1860-1869, 1867-09-26
Coon JUDGES. saw that in buving Boots Il

Coop JUDGES, say that in buying Boots Il
Shoes ofWeservelt & Co, they get better
article at the same price than they can at
other places where Boots & Shoes are sold.
They have very large stock, the variety is
as large as you will find in any store, and
their warrants and promises are always made
Or God
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
A Funny Dog Story.

When the war in Italy COM
menced, the Zouaves embarked for
Genoa; but as they were going on
board the ship, they saw formal
order forbidding the entrance of
all dogs upon the vessel. As they
were very much attached to their
dogs, they were stricken with grief.
1t Was not easy to deceive the sharp
lookout kept by the lntendent, for
every soldier passed along the mar
row gangway, one by one, as their
names were called. Necessity is
the mother of invention. The
drummers unscrewed their drums,
and the hest dogs of the regiment
were concealed in the drums, which
were screwed up again. When
regiments embark no music Is
played, but on this occasion the
Colonel determined there should
be music. He ordered the trum-
pets and drums to take the head of
the column, and to play a lively
tuEe. The situation of the drum
mers-every one of whom had a
dog in his drum-may be conceiv-
ed! The trumpets sounded, the
drums were silent. The Colonel
got angry, and bawled to know
why the drums did not beat. There
was but one thing to do and that
was to beat. The moment the
drums began to beat innumerable
dogs began to bowl and to bay, to
the astonishment of every one but
the Zouaves. Every body looked
right, lett, backward and forward,
but no sign of a dog anywhere !;
and yet, the more the drummers
beat, the more the dogs howled.-
At last spaniel fell out of drum,
rolled over and over on the ground,
took to his heels bowling louder
than ever. -Roars of laughter
greeted this explanation of the
mysterious howls. The intendents
ordered the drummers to advance
on board, one by one, and to roll
the drum as they came. If bar
king was heard, the drum was un.
screwed, and the dog put ashore
Only one dog got on board; this
was Touton, who kept quiet thro'
all the rolling. 1t need not be said
that the Third Zouaves adore Tou-
ton. He made his entree into Pa
ris at their head.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
goetitat
i. From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
SONG OF THE INVALID.

How long the winter lasts. mother.
wish the spring would come,
u want to see the flowers bloom
Around our cottage home,
I've tried to bear this pain, mother,
To suffer and be strong;
But all in vain feel it now,
cannot stay here long.
wish that l could live, mother.
Y TIL spring times sunny hours,
lwish that might pass away
Amid the wildwood flowers.
FOR now the snow is on the ground,
The cold winds wildly moan,
Inc very light looks sad to me
That warns the hearth of home,
gaze ont on the leafless trees,
! watch their branches wave;
I'D like to see them bloom before
They lay me in the grave.
flong to see the meadows green,
And buds begin to swell,
lsometimes think the warm bright davs
F,W0uld cheer and make me well.
but III not murmur now. mother.
III know these thoughts are vain,
III never see the waving corn
Or hill tops green again.
Yet shall gaze on brighter scenes
When they lay me down to rest,
For shall view unblinded then
The mansions of the blest.
CLAIR CLYDE.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

her head in deep confusion, he ad
ded: II suppose you are the plain
tiff? Well, don't take on. limo
cence and virtue will be protected
in this here court"
This was the saddest blunder ot
all. The judge was again made to
see his mistake, and would have
been considerably set back had il
net been for corrective in the
shape of "folty drops OF the critter,"
which he instantly applied.
In a few moments all was ready
in right down earnest. The BRIDE
groom had arrived, iull of Joy
The excitement was intense. He
evidently felt every inch a Judge.
"J-J-o-e B,B-o, we rs" commen.
ced the man of law, in that distress
ing style of speech with which he
was invariably troubled when un-
der the influence of liquor. "Joe
Bowers, stand up. Have you any,
thing to s,s's-say w-w-why s-s-sen
tence-"
"Stop, stop, stop, Judge" shouted
the sheriff, from the back part of
the room; "you are not going to
hang the man, but marry him.
The Judge drew a long breath,
and blinked rapidly, but he stood
his ground well. Recovering him.
self he proceeded
"J-J-o-e Blowers, do y-you
take Nancy H Harkins for y-your
wife-so help me God?"
This was a tolerable effort, and
Joe NODDED assent.
~"NNancy Harkins, it now re-
mains for this court to"
Here the sheriff again interrupt
ed the judge, reminding him of the
real business of the evening.
"Miss Nancy" resumed the
Judge, after being set Alright, "d-do
y-you t-take Joe Blowers for
husband, ito the best of your
knowledge and b.belief, or do you
not~
"You can bet l WILL" softly an.
swered the light,hearted Nancy.
The judge then tsok the hands of
the happy couple,and joining them,
wound up as follows;
"1t now remains for this here
court to pronounce you, J-Joe Bow.
ers, and y-you Nancy Harkins,man
and wife; and (here the judge paus-
ed to wipe the perspiration from
his face may G-G-God Or-mity |
have mercy on y-y-your s-s-sou1s!
remove the culprit!"
The company roared. Joe and
Nancy weakened. The sheriff was
taken with a leaving. The judge
himself was lost In a glass of apple
jack. 1t was the greatest wedding
ever witnessed.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
JeffersOn's Idea of Medicine,

Jefferson had no confidence in
Materia Medica. While a resident
in Paris his daughter was seized
with typhus fever, and an eminent
physician was sent for. He came,
examined the patient, gave direc-
tons about nursing, and departed
without giving or leaving any med
icine. The same course was pur-
sued on the second and third days,
when Mr.. Jefferson said:
"Doctor, you don't appear to be
doing anything for my daughter9-
What is the reason?"
"The reason is, l want her to get
we'll. | had supposed you knew
what my system of practice was"
"No; what is it!"
"To have the most careful nurs-
ing, have the disease wear itself
out, and let nature do the rest; but
lnever | give any medicine"
The result was, the daughter re-
covered with an uninjured consti-
tuition, and for thirty gears Jeffer-
son followed the system of the
French physician.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
9i9hly Smusiag sturn
Joe Bowers Wedding.

in the mountains" boasts of one Of
the best judges in California. On
the bench he is firm, decided and
prompt, not caring u snap of the
finger for either the applause Of
friends or the muttering of ene-
mics. He is, perhaps, the most de-
voted man to the law in all crea-
tion, and has his head so full of
what he terms 'judicial talk" that
he not unfrequently finds himself
making learned charges, and pass
ing sentence outside the court
room.
On a recent occasion the judge
was called to exercise the "power
and authority in him vested" in
the case of young couple who
desired wedlock. OF course he
consented to perform the pleasant
duty, and on the appointed even
ing was promptly on hand at the
hour at which the affair was to
come off. The room was crowded
by the beauty and fashion of the
town, and none looked more digni.
fed or happy than the judge him.
self who was dressed within an
inch of his life.
The wine had passed around the
room, the music had ceascd-the
time for making Joseph Bowers
and Nancy Harkins one, had DR..
rived. Every heart throbbed with
the most delightful emotions. The
young gentlemen desired to know
how Joe would stand it and the
young ladies were anxious to see
how Nancy would pass the ordeal.
Others again, who had closely OBJ
served the turn of affairs during
the evening, fixed their attention
upon the judge, to see how he
would come out of the scrape.
Atlength the trying moment was
announced, the judge rose very
cautiously from the chair which he
occupied in one corner of the room,
and casting his eyes over the COM
pany he singled out the sheriff of
the county, who was present as an
invited guest. The judge had just
imbibed enough to make him for
get the nature of his business. He
was full of his judicial talk" and
required nothing but the presence
of the sheriff to start him. Look
ing sternly at that officer, he shout
ed:
"Mr. Sheriff, open the court, and
call order"
A general twitter followed this
command, in the midst of which
Mr.. Sheriff took the "court" by the
arm and led him to his seat in the
corner, at the same time informing
the august parsonage of the mis-
take.
Everything now bid fair for a
pleasant and sudden termination of
the affair, until another annoyance,
which was nothing else than the
absence of the bridegroom, was
observed. 1t turned out that he
had just stepped across the street
to join his friends in a parting
drink; but before his return, some
cool ol-blooded wag had whispered
into the ear of our old fogy the
cause of "the delay of the proceed
ing" Instantly Il Q chair in the
corner moved, and in that direction
all eyes were fixed.
"Mr. Sheriff." slowly bawled the
judge, "bring Joe into the court on
a supenar," (the judge had his own
way of prOnouncing the word y
then, addressing the bride, who had
stood in the foreground and hung
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
goetifal.
From the Saturday Evening Post.
THEN AND NOW.
BY WILLIAM W. WALKER,

HOW long since my footsteps sought
A lonely bower by the stream?
low long! alas, the years have gone,
And left their memery as a dream.
A dream twas not Of life's wild storm
When by its banks | loved to roam;
AND from its purling waters bright,
rake pebbles to my childhood's home
How long ago gathered moss
Out or the green and shady dell?
Or by the ripping waters roved
AS fancy wove her magic spell?
lt was dream-a dream of Joys
In future days-days yet to come:
But now a mocking sunbeam bright
Stlll lures me back to childhood's home
Twas then the purling waves were bright.
49, lis now the waters DER me flow
o Twas then the zcphyrs famed nv check .
Ills now that's and tempests blow
Not now, twas thenI loved to rove:
Not then, It's now life's storm is dark =.
Not then l heard the tempest roar;
Ills now the pillows toss my barque!
Is all that's left a pleasing dreamp
All, no, It's not vision bright;
But here and there ritted cloud,
Gives now and then ray of light.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

Directions for Husbands.

IL your wife loves you, you need
read no farther, for these directions
are not intended for you. Yo,.
need no directions. You can get
drunk as often as you please, be
guilty of robbery, assassination,
battle, murder, sudden death and
privY conspiracy, and make your
wife believe, by means of single
kiss, that you are one of the saints
OF the earth.
For those husbands who only ap-
parently, not really, have mastered
the hearts of their wives. we lay
down the following directions:
If on your wedding night you
failed to get drunk and break all
your mother-in-law's crockery, do
something equally outrageous as
soon as possible. You will then
always. be able to scare your wife
into submission by reminding her
of what you have done, and what
you may be provoked to do again.
If your wife is fond of entertain
ing, and you are not, wait till her
fashionable friends are assembled
at the house, and then walk into
the parlor with nothing on but
your shirt and stockings. 1t will
doubtless have the effect of making
the company fly the room.
If you are fond of smoking a pipe
and your wife complains of your
breath on account of it, eat onions;
it will make her forget the pipe.
If you have a baby, groan as if
your last hour had come, whenever
1T begins squaling at night. You
will not then be called upon to
walk it.
AS sick rooms are not pleasant,
always have business that will keep
you down town the whole day, and
half the night, when your wife is
sick.
When you get home at four o.
clock in the morning, after having
lost a months earnings lighting
the t.ger," or playing a "game Of
draw" with your friends, tell your
wife your business is getting so
large that the labor of carrying it
on is breaking down your constitu-
tion, and you must take in a part
ner; but when she mentions a new
dress, shake your head and talk
about economy and hard times.
If your wife is very religious and
fond of entertaining ministers, take
advantage of the first opportunity
to insult one of these gentlemen in
your own house. 1t can be done
with perfect impunity, and will de-
ter others from calling during the
meal hours, or any other time.
If your circumstances are such
that you find it necessary to prac-
tice economy, begin with your ia
BILE, and dine every day at a restau-
rant
There are certain little things
that must be done daily by one or
the other of every married couple.
Impress upon your wife that the
performance of these is very dis
tasteful to you and so force her to
attend to the whole of them her.
relt. Among these is the kindling
of the fire in the morning, if you
have no servant. Lie in bed and
let your wife do it. Also, wait for
her to pour out the water for you
to wash, brush your clothes, and
place your slippers by a chair be.
fore the fire. When all is prepared
get out of bed and dress yourself,
taking care not to show, by word
or look, that you appreciate the
little attentions that have been
shown you. But if you find that
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
ADVERTISING TERMS.
Paying for a Homestead.

SEVERAL years ago there resided
in "a fisherman, whose surname
was Peter. He had quite a large
: family, and had purchased a house,
giving, as part payment, a mort,
gage on the building. Time passed
oil and he got in arrears, and the
mortgage threatened to forecIose.
This was a severe blow to Peter as
he knew not where to go, or how
to relieve himself. In his trouble.
he applied to a well known finan.
cier in town, who listened 10 his
story, blamed him for his negli.
gence, gave him some good advice,
and concluded by saying that he
would help him out of the difficult
ty, and put him in the way of pay.
ing for his house, if he would sol.
emnly agree to follow out his in
structions, and if he deviated in
the least he would have nothing
further to do with him. Peter as.
sented to this and received the
money to pay up the mortgage,
amounting to $500. "Now," said
his benefactor, 81 want you to own
that house as soon as possible, and
to do so you must give me your
note, and upon your return from
every trip of fishing, l want you to
come Immediately to my house and
tell me how much you have earned,
and how much you can afford to
pay towards the house, without dis
tressing yourself and family. I
shall watch you, and if you fail to
come even once, then you will lose
your house" Peter promised, and
went his way. "A fortnight passed,
and one morning Peter knocked at
the door Of his patron.
"Walk in" was the response.
GLOW much did you make this
trip?"
"FOrty dollars, sir"
"How much can you pay toward
the house~
"Thirty, sir"
The amount was duly indorsed
on the note, and Peter again. left.
AT the return from every trip he
never failed to report himself, al
though sometimes he could not pay
but one dollar, yet he was always
kindly received and encouraged
At the expiration of two years he
made his lastpayment, interest and
principal, and received a clear IT,
tie to his house, which is owned
and occupied by his family to this
day, who would have been poorly
off indeed had he not left them at
his decease a place of shelter.
There is moral to this sketch,
which is, that those desirous of
owning property must make be-
and add to the amount
from their earnings, even if the
are sometimes small. They
all help to swell the aggregate and
teach lessons OF economy, which,
in themselves, are more valuable
than the money saved, Young
men, save portion Of your earn
lngs, and invest them where they
will be safe, instead of spending
them foolishly, as is too often the
case in these days.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

A CALIFORNIA letter says a fall
seven hundred feet higher than the
famous 70 Semitic has le,n dis
covered. The Yo Semitic is thir-
teen hundred feet high.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

A CHICAGO young lady of four
teen eloped with a young man Of
twenty-five, was married three
weeks and then got a divorce.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

THE Naples Rothschild has re-
tired from business with a fortune
of f40,000,000.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

THE London Telegraph has the
largest circulation of any daily
newspaper in the world-155,OO0.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
j. j. Mcdowell.

A TTORNEY AT LAW u CLAIM AGENT,
"A will practice in Vinton ard adjoining coLn. .
Ties. Also, Deprty collector of Internal Rev.
enue. Office in tho Vnten Co. Bank. ianGi
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

THE Cleveland Leader proposes
to guarantee $4,000 majority for
equal suffrage in Ohio.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

"No PIECE for the wicked" said a
bad boys mother, when he asked
for mince pie.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

THE colored members were in
their seats at the opening of the
Massachusetts legislature.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

NEARLY six hundred thousand
children in Indiana 90 to school.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
Back Pay, BOUNTY and Pen
S1OnS

WILL be collected promptly b.
" EDWARD A. BRATToN.
~ N'ARTHUR, OHIO.
Az soldiers, who are by law. enti,Iad n
sack PS, Bounty and Pensions, and wild.
9"s, fathers, mothers, brothers, and sisters Of
deceased soldiers claims will be prcmItly at
t..uou w. jny3tf
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

WHAT is nothing?-A footless
stocking without a leg.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

The distillery at Waverly sus-
pended operations in January
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
@istellaneplts.
VENTON CO. BANK
[UNINCORPORATED,l
M'ARTHUR.

sToCKH HoLDERs:
JOSEPH J. MCDOWELL, Prest.
JAMES w. DELAY, Cash.
II. :. BUNDY, +. ID. DODGE, A. WOLF,
II. +. AUSTIN, D.V.RANNELs, +. STRONG,
A. A. AUSTIN.
Bank Of Discount and Deposit.
Will buy and sell Government Securi-
ties, Bonds, &c.
Collections made at the usual rates.
jan24tf
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

SALT LAKE CRY balls are opened
with prayer.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

JOE BOWERS, immortal in song, it
will be seen, is married at last.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
Change Of Time.

M. & G. II. r., TIME TABLE.
IRON and alter Sunday the 18th day Of Dec
4 1865, Trains will leave Stations named as
follows
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21

'' ARcHrBID MAYO,
Archibald NIayO.

GLAlM AGENT.-Back Pay, Bounty an d
~. Pensions will be promptly collected. OF.
ncsin the Court House, Macarthur, Ohio. All
seidiers who are entitled by law 70 back sy,
ows, fathers, mothers, brothers and sisters win
be Ircmptly attended TO. ianSy
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
2rnfessioual.
ID. A. BratfOn.

A rTORNEY AT LAW, McARTHUR, OHIO
- wnl attend to all legal business entrusted
hoss, locking, and adjoining counties. Partie3
u,Ar attention given to the collection ofsoldiers
eiains for pensions, bounties, arrears of nav
sIs,' against 'he or Ohio, ih,ludi Nor
gan raid claims. INA
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
THE HEALING POOL,

DLANKS of every description. forsale
ID at this office.
The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-02-21
Homer e.. Jones.

% OVHHCS1
A kTT0RNEY AT LAW, McARTHUR. OHIO
a will attend promptly 10 oil business ,ntrns :
eoo 70 MS care jan24
The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1867-06-01
THIRD EDITIO N
FROM EUROPE BY THE CABLES.
NooN REPoRT on MARKErs.

LONDON, June 1-Noon.-Consols opened at
96A for money; United States Five-Twenties
%; Erie Railroad, 4014; Illinois Central. 78I.
LIVERPOOL, June e1-Noon-Cotton active and
nrmeT. Sales to-day will reach 10000 bales.
Mlddling uplands, llA@ll26d.; middling Or
BreadstufTs firm, Corn, 80s. 3D.. Wheat, white
California, Ids; No. l Milwaukee red Abs. 3D.;
Oats, 3s. Cd; Flour, 29s for Western canal;
Barley, Is. 3D.; Peas, 40s
Provisions unchanged Pork, 82s. Cd; Beef,
1925 3D.; Lard, 49s. Cd; Cheese. SIS.
Produce-Petroleum Spirits, lld.: refined,
Is. 3d.: Potashes 3s 3d.; Rosin, common, rs. 3d.;
fine, l3s.; Spirits Turpentine, 84s. Cd; TaloW,
ABS. 3D.; Cloverseed, 42s.
LONDON, June l-Noon.-No. IL Dutch stand
ara Sugar, 24s 3D.; Scotch Pig Iron, 53s. Cd; Lin
seed Cakes, 60 l5s Linseed Oil, 940
THE CHINA ARRIVED OUT
QUEENSTOWN, June l-2 p. M.-The steamer
China, Captain Hockey, from Boston on the
22d ult., arrived at this port to-day.
FURTHER REDUCTION IN THE RATE OF INTEREST.
LONDON, June 1-2 p. MA still further re-
duction of the Bank rate of discount will be
made in q few days.
FINANCIAL AND COMMERCIAL REPORT TO TWO
O'CLOCK.
Consols for money, 96I& American securities
are firmer, and q general advance has been
established in prices The following are the
quotations at this Ihour:-Unlted States Five.
twenties, 731z; Erie Railroad shares, 40lG Illinois
Central, 77L.
PARIS, June 1-2 p. M.-The Bank OF France
LONDON, June l-2 p. M.-The market for
Sugar is firm at 24s. Sd. for No. II, Dutch
standard.
DON, June ! - Evening. - Consols, SO.
United States Five-twenties, 49,; Illinois Cen
trail 7Si; Erie, 401.