Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1867-09-03
For the Spectator.
.PnSSIrM HOILER 4

-POSSUM HOLLER, A. ID. 1867.
MEssRs. SPECTATOR.-It will not interest
your readers to know that [ am rusticating. [
am quietly dreaming life away beneath the TO-
mantle shades Of this sequestered rural vale
How enchanting to be lulled to virtuous SUM
bers by the melodious music of hardy band
of veteran mosquitoes I'D in,tor-night-un
Sorry to say there are no locals here except the
aforesaid mosquitoes. Yet they would furnish
matter for one of the grandest epics in our
language-if the poet could be found The
mailed warriors fearessly marching to the air
of ''On to Victory their war-whoop break
ing upon the deathly stiffness Of the night );
the heart-rending screams of innocent victims !;
the missions Of the dread proboscs, more ter
rlble than surgeons probe or dentists forceps !;
the flowing OF human gore, the swelling of hui
man fesh-would 60 to make up one Of the
darkest tragedies in the life Of man.
It's failing of mine to DE fond of tragedy
So it has been ever since Debbie and [ went to
town in vehicle
':The cart was broke and the horse was blind,',
SO says the poet, and we had a smash up Deb
tumbled out and [ could Mt hesitate to follow
After that tragedy we concluded to hitch lit
tie comedy on to it and get married but the
measles and hoopin' cough have been so bad
Of late years wei afraid to risk it. We talked
over the matter before [ fed to the soHtudes Of
the wilderness. Marriage is a serious bust
ness, said Deb Yes said [, ''it is death
to man and pretty hard on woman" She
raised her fearful eyes to mine and with calm
brow, said, '.But it's nat raj. %
This is Postum Holler, and the name reveals
its nature. At present | am engaged in some
interesting geological observations which may
throw valuable light upon the scientific world
The Postum is my subject He excels man in
one thing-that Of dyin' gracefully. We poor
1nortals die but once in life. time, and often
suffer for want of practice Iet the Postum
has some, what of the man in his nature. l
have discovered several points Of resemblance
LIST. He will cheat the world rather than sacri-
fee his personal property for the good of man
kind End. He will convince man that he has
been victimized and then skedaddle glorying
in his shrewdness. 3rd. He is never better
coRtented than when helping himself at the ex-
pense of his neighbors. 18th. He likes persim-
MONS The Postum may well exclaim with the
poet,
Say not my..art is fraud; all live by seeming"
decidedly favor the theory of pre-Possum-
tie race, l. e. a primitive race of good possums,
but who lost their native simplicity by being
thrown in world along with deceitful man.
But the discussion Of this question | leave to
Darwin, Huxley and Agassiz.
AW UeVOOaF,
PHIETY-SIKS.
Shakespeare doubtless had his eye on the
Postum when he said 1.-THE coward dies many
times; the brave man but once"
JUDGE CHAsE--NEGRo SUFFRAGE -Arumor
is current here that Judge Chase, since his
recent visit to the South upon his official duties,
has changed his views relative to comforting the
right of suffrage upon the late slaves of the
South that he now thinks it improper, and
that it threatens the nations with disastrous
consequences. If this is true, then Judge Chase
owes it to his country to give his opinion to the
public. The subject is indeed, the most i'm
portant now agitating the nation. The Judge
was the first prominent man in the nation who
boldly advocated the according Of the right of
suffrage to the negro. If his mind has under
gone such change as that reported it is re-
markable fact-alike creditable to his honesty
and his Judgment. At all events, the whole
nation feels an interest in knowing whether
there is truth in this rumor or not.-Dspatch.
Mr.. JoHNsoN's BAoKER. sticks to
the President. He says
Military government Negro supremacy
These are the ruling ideas that flash across the
Atlantic and ring the death-knell of the Repub-
lie upon monarchical ears. VIII the loyal States,
east and west, consent to the overthrow of our
institutions in this way? The President must
topple over these barriers which retard our
march He mist resUScitate the great PRINCIPLES