The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1867-08-06
1san ne zle.Ie BIOL

FbP South Al least, ne ~ NJ really the
"a and ws the ivy; lnstid of lOOKin up
o Us, ne contracted a disagreeable habit
~ IoOkin down onto rs. There wuZ
J;her reasons why he coodeut be made
AVAILABLE for our uses, and therefore it
FuZ decided 70 go back onto the AZ
5kiu, and TO aRtn attempt his reduck-
,hen TO ez near his normal spear eZ the
abnormal coDdishen uvthe times wood
idmif. The directors CIV the college
net and changed the name nv the In
back to the Southern Mill
ary and CisssikIe Instftoot," and the
Corners wuz Itself again.
DsekIn Pogram lookt e tho ten years
red bin lifteo on him. "How pleasant
dis" sed he, SO walk erect aRin in
ront Nv a Niger, and to pass EN- ez tho
hey Wuz niggers! Oh ef Good only
Tollop one wonst more, methinks /
God die happy"
We he'd meelin last night 10 con-
,ider this niger question, which wood
Iev resDItid in great good and he'd a
Influence towards strengthen
North, who are fightin the heTesy nv
ligger suffrage, bed IL not bin for that
Pollock. and that pest Joe
BIgier. ! he'd made my IegleT speech
IN the Niger and With much effect.
bed quoted from somebody's quota
shen from Agassfz, which demonstfat-
I'd the radicle difference there Is atween
The Afrikin and the proud Caucashen;
arxuin from the length nv his heel and
arm, the thickness of his skull and 80
forth, that the niger WIZ totally unit
10 exercise the rites nv free men. wu1
applauded vociferously and by none
more than Pollock and Joe BigleE. Ez
took my seat and wuZ a wipen the
from my classikle brow,
ieeIin that had settled that question,
Pollock TiZ and desired TO say q few
words and make q suggestion. Sed he.
az hey listened with Interest to the
elokent speaker and am happy to say
have learned fax witch Is new TO me. Ei
/ hey ever doubted the inferiority nv
the Niger them doubts are removed
psrvidin alluZ. that the statements uy
the! Speaker SIS tToo, Nv witch hev nj
doubt, eZ the caracter Nv the speaker i;
a sufficient guarantee for the trooth w
whichever hesseZ."
1 bowed stately-like, with the air ~
one 10 whom SIGH compliments WIZ M
everyday affair, Wich they amt by nc
means, but on The contrary quite the
reverse.
But want it demonstrated TO the
NV the most obtoOse-I
want rife here a measurement NV the
average Afrikin and the average white
man, that all the world may know the
difference. / move that IL be did,"
! acceded. ''Let 1t be DONE" sed /,
that the ve1ed question may be settled
SeyraI niggers were askt TO submit tC
the measurement, but all refused. FL
nally Joe Bigler sed he saw Napoleon
Johnson, Niger witch wunst belonged
10 Deekin POgrAm, 10 the audience
'Sapoleon,n sed he, twill you con-
tribit yoOrself to the great science w
Amt Yoo williu 10 let u:
yoose 700 awhile TO demonstrate thC
CRATE and CROWN trooth that yooI
grandfather wuz a monkey? Step up
Napoleon, nothin dasht, slept up, and
Pollock, Bascom, Bigler and / meas
ured hun, with the following result
Hight. ,........- ...---........5 feet lnce
Weight. lbs aVeruuP ost
Length NV foot. --...l2 lnche4
Breadth NV -...... s. inches
Length NV hand .........-..--.....eL lnchst
Bnadth Nv hand. ....-.--. .-..........-.. lnches
Length NV bone from ankle 10 knee-6 inches
Projecshun Of inches
Ia sIasssity uyhkull. which, bein
the top or cap Nv the yeTte-
brAl cOlutl. so TO speak, isRc-
coTdin TO HippocTaLseh, a
Truly scientific Greek, and
Hon. WIN. Mungen, of Ohio.
"a very important bone for
pretty mucn all the races 81 cubic inche
Nov" sed Pollock, "let us EXAMINE
in the same way avrage specimen u
the CRucashen race eZ he Is found il
this delectable spot. Will Issaker Ga
witt be good enuff to step forred Iper
pose 10 demonstrate the soOperiOrity w
the Caucashen with two loot rule
Eiggers won't lie. Step up Issaker."
And Issaker slept up, ana wuz iuel
suTed with the follerin result:
feet inches
loO ibs
Length NV Ianu "a lhclea
Length Nv foot Inches
BLeidlh NV inehes
ProJecshun OF heel...........--....-..- II Inches
Length NV bone from ankle to Knee. Is inches
CapScity nv skull..---..........,-H7 cubic inches
Pollock was delited! "Here, "sez he
ait Is in u nut shell. Issaker hez
shorter hand, a more nATrer hand,
shorter and narrerer foot, and his hee
proIecks less than the nigger's by 81
inches Good Lord, how L hev bin de
seeved! Wat errors hev bin nussin
How kin human bein hev intellect
whose heel proJecks four Inches? How
reIoict Am that / arm at last set ritz
on these important piuts ~
l smiled benlnantly onto him.
Bigler riZ- al too" sed he, IAN sat.
Isied that the niger Is not wat we, who
wuz disposed to consider him at to ex'
erciss rites, supposed him 10 be.
held firm when the measurement w
his hands and arms wuE being made
but the heel staggered me. It's cleal
that no one kin hev intellek whose les
isn't set in his foot better than that.
shell persoo this investigashen. Hevir
now "a startin pEnt-a heel, ez l may
say, to stand On-I shell go on to prove
the inferiOrity NV the niger. With
that heel for a fulcrum, Ishel, with the
lever of trooth, proceed to upset the
fooshen into Boston. l shel assoOm
that Napoleon Is a average specimen
NV the lower or unIntellecIoonl Afrikin
type. Is IL so?".
at isl II is ~ yelled we all, delitId at
the happy turn the Thing wuz takin.
al shell also assoom that Isaker Ga
witt is Avrage of the higher or intel
Iectual Cnucashen type. Is 1t soH"
"Certainly! Certainly"
choosets. Napoleon, KIN 700 READ ~
l SAW the trap into which we he'd fall
len. and risin hastily protested that the
he'd bin carried far enuff,
and so did Deekin Pogram, but Bigler
swore he wuz agoin TO kiyer MRssa-
choOsits with shame, and L sot down
PRrRlyLed.
KIN you read. Napoleon"
Yes, sab Z" a-- ..aas
Read this, then, sed Blgler, handIn
him u nOosepaper. Ns
The Niger read 1t ez peert ez Moo
school marin, which well he
mite, ez he learned 1t from one NV EN-.
4"Kin 700 write?"
Certainly" and takIn pen he writ
half NV the DecIarashen NV Independ-
eDce,
S''Set down, Napoleon. It's a deviIish
pity yoor heels is so long; otherwise
yOod be credited with hevin intelleck.
Now Issaker, my bold Caucashen, kin
you read 2"
Al ssnE ar. dnnlt answer the sk offer at