Owyhee bullion. [volume] (Silver City, I.T. [Idaho]) 1866-1867, 1867-10-31

sordid and personal motives-that they
are too vepal to discharge their duties
honorably. Wendell Phillips says neither
the Thirty-ninth nor the Fortieth Con
gress had sense enough to draw statute
that would hold water; yet the Republi-
cans and Radicals tell Ls that such o cor
rupt and stupid set Of men are the only
authority worthy of regard in the gov
eminent, and that all other branches, and
the Constitution itself, must be made sub
ordinate to their will
WOULDN'T Own UP Joe Stetson
was a wild rollicking fellow, who spent
most of his time in drinking and spree
ing, while his wife, Polly, was left at
home to do the chores. Upon certain
occasion Joe left home to be back, as he
said, that night. Night came, but Joe
did not. The next day passed, but about
sunset Joe came up in the worst condi-
ton imaginable-his clothes dirty and
torn and one eye in deep mourning, and
his face presenting more the appearance
of piece of raw meat than anything
else. Polly met him at the door, and
noticing his appearance, exclaimed:
"Why, Joe, what in the world is the
matter 2"
"Polly," said Joe, "do you know Jim
Andrews? Well, him and me had "a
fght' .t.j
"Who whipped, Joe?" asked Polly.
"Polly, we had the hardest fight you
ever did see. l hit him and he hit me,
and then we clinched, Polly; amt supper
most ready2 l hain't had anything since
morning"
"But tell me who whipped, joe con-
tinued Polly.
"Polly," replied Joe, II tell you never
did see such fight as me and him had.
When he elinched me, l jerked loose
from him, and then gin him three or four
of the most sufficientest ticks you ever
heard Of Polly, amt supper ready p
I'm nearly starved.
"Joe, do tell who whipped" continue
ed Polly.
"Polly," replied Joe, "You don't know
nothin' bout fighting. I tell you we
fought like tigers we rolled and tumbled
first him on top, then me on top, then
the boys would pat me on the shoulder
and boiler, Oh, my Stetson We rouc-
ed and bit, and tore up the dirt in Seth
Runnel's grocery yard worser nor two
wild bulls. Polly, amt supper most
ready? I'm monstrous hungry"
"Joe Stetson p exclaimed Polly IN a
tone bristling with anger, will you tell
me who whipped ?"
"Polly," said Joe, drawing long sigh,
81 hollered,"
An Illinois editor publishes the fol
lowing as the effort of its new reporter !:
We are informed that the gentleman
who stood on his head under a spiledriv-
er for the purpose Nv havin tite pair Nv
butes druv on, shortly after found him
self in China, perfectly nacud without q
cent in his pocket. He rites that it is
his intenshun Nv returning home by the
way Nv the Paris Exposition.
~ o.hcl Jay young lazy OF the
beautiful, blushiDg type went intoa Ger
tain dry goods store on Main street, in
search of some undressed muslin. Not
wishing to use this awkward term, with
several distinctly and audible "ahems p
she said to the attentive clerk: "IIave
you any muslin that is not up in the
morningW The clerk tainted.
Josh Billings in his advice to young
lady as to how she shall receive a promo.
sal, says: "You ought tew take it kind,
looking down hill with an. oxpresshan
about half tickled and half scart, After
the pop is over, ifyour luyor wants to kiss
you, l don't think l would say yes or no.
but let the thing take its own course"
"You may be as alFectiouate as YOU
please, dear" said wife to her husband.
who was fond of her and wine, too. land
you may smell of wine if you will; but
please not to smell of wine and be a!fec.
tionate at the same moment. | value
your affection too highly to let you dis