The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1867-05-01


fairest flowersl
An Act was introduced into the
English Parliament in ITO, pro-
viding that all women, of whatever
age, rank or degree, whether virgins,
maids, or widows, that shall, from
and after such Act, impose upon,
seduce and betray into matrimony,
any of his Majesty's male subjects by
the scents, paints, cosmetics, washes,
artificial teeth, false hair, Spanish
wool, iron stays, hoops, high-heeled
shoes, or bolstered hips. shall incur
the penalty of the law now in force
against witchcraft and like misde-
meanors, and that the marriage,
upon conviction, shall stand null
and void.
RATs.-Rats, it is reported, weigh
on nm average apound each, and each
pound represents five bushels of corn.
A ship laden with corn was recently
discharged at Antwerp, and an i'm
mense swarm of rats of enormous
size rushed from the hold and in
vaded the neighboring vessels, ware
houses and habitations. The work
men were obliged to retreat to give
passage to these unwelcome strangers.
An old colored preacher and school
teacher in Columbus, Ga, was asked.
the other day, what party he be-
longed to now. Like n "man and
brothey," he replied: "Don't b'long
to no party, sab; loves all good peo-
pie jes alike, and prays for ali jes
alike. "Then," said the inquirer,
''you are a philanthropist?" "No,
sab, isn't adat, dat L isn't-I'se q
Baptis, sah,s q Baptis."
A firm desirous of finding out the
pecuniary status of q person who
wished to purchase goods, telegraphed
for the Information. The answer
came back, ''Note good for any
amount" So large bill of goods
was sold and shipped. The note
came due and went to protest. The
firm found with disgust that the
despatch should have read, "Not
good for any amount"
sPRAYERs. the items in the
general appropriation bill passed by
the Pennsylvania Legislature, were
$500 "for prayers for the Senate"
and $500 'for prayers for the House.
lin other words, for chaplains' SER
vice. Which was q reckless waste
Of money, as the members generally
were past praying for, even at the
opening of the session.
CALM rs. CLAM.-In Professor
Phelps book entitled "The Still
Hour" occurs the following sentence
"The stiffness of the hour is the
still Ola dead calm at sea. Imagine
the reverend authors horror when
he found, after several hundred
copies had been printed, that "calm''
was mades by the types to. read
''clam."
FROM THE SrATEs.-The old
Texans, who lived there while it was
a republic, used to ask every new
conner if he was from the States.
The same question has been revived
by Texas being tcrritorialized, and
the first question now put TO q
stranger is, care yon from the
States?"
On some railroads, it is customary
10 nave lock on the stove, to pre-
vent passenger from meddling with
the fire. A wag being asked why
they locked the stove, coolly replied.
that sit was to prevent the fire from,
going out.
sympathy constitutes friendship
out in love there is sort of antipa.
my, or opposing passion. Each
strives 10 be the other, and both to-
gether make one whole.
Paddy says that people who dom
De3eye IN purgatory may go farther
What is the difference between
spendthrift and feather-bedY On.
Is hard up and the other soft dow
Dr.. Blank begs those indebted :,
him to pay up, that he MIGHT Mo,