The Vinton record. [volume] (M'arthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1866-1891, 1867-01-31
Young loves sixth Dream.

~ lJ'Fyi ". IL. NALLANDlGHAM.
iun -A------- Liz nol
D. Young Loves Sixth Dream.
Mr. Zipp was brought before the
Justice yesterday afternoon on the
charge of chaste ming his wife.
With a broken yoice-she had a
sore throat Mrs. Mpp said: my
husband passed the blessed Sab
bath in beating me. He Knocked
me down with a piece of iron, say
ing, ironically, thus does man
iron. He beat me with his fists.
He calls it good exercise for his
muscles. He flung the bedding all
over the floor. He locked up the
bread and herrings, saying they
did not agree with me. I took
dinner with a neighbor. / would
1 depart from him if he would but
\ give me back the love gifts gave
4 him. But he won't, He looks up.
!. on the bed, table and cooking uten-
sils in a practical, and not a senti-.
mental light. To him they are
comforts; to me they are relics of
a lost love. He almost killed me.
should not have been able to
come here if had not thought he
would be punished . y Ia7 ha''..
Said the husband: I'VE have been
married three months. For two
months and twenty.nine days |
have repented oft. | am her sixth
husband, She is an unnatural
wife, and has not provided any
tonbstones for any Of her previous
husbands. She says they were
green, and that the grass over their
graves shall be their epitaph., l
have already bought a tombstone
for myself. My brother keeps it
| for me-. ~
my wife takes no food but cof-
fee, bread and butter. and herrings
She scorns our national dishes.
| She is a shrew, But being a wo,
man, | suppose if isn't her fault.
All women are born SO, Il ,.,I -oJ
Many times a dav she would be
afectionate, and kiss me. She kiss
ed thus: grasping my back hair
with her hands, she would pull un-,
Ill my head went back and my face
was turned up toward hers; then
she kept pulling until my mouth
opened enough to suit her. Then
would she kiss me. In order to
kiss me again, she would repeat
Il e whole operation. Fortunately,
my hair is almost out. SoonI can
not be thus kissed again. | think
she puts the hair thus obtained
from me in her waterfall. Econo-
my, doubtless. i' .,' I'D
Sunday morning | wished her to
go to church, 1t gives her chance
to show off her finery, and she then
comes home goodnatured. Butshe
would not, and with a smoking
herring in her hand, she'set down
to read Rinaldo RlnaIdini. First
she would read a page; then she
would take bit Of herring. | re-
monstrated kindly with her. Then
she compared me with previous
husbands. eYl' .tob
Then my heart became sad, for
| felt that | must chastise her. It
was my duty as her sixth husband. /
| beat her for the first five hus-
bands-if they had done it | should
not now be here-thet1 l beat her
for myself Having no rod to do
it with, | experimental with other
articles. think | can conscienti-
ously recommend the poker as an
A No. l chastening instrument.
have meant a rod of
iron, and the poker is it. As
Christian, ] was obliged to beat
my WIFE Ishould not be fined for
it. Is she not flesh of my flesh, and
bone of my bones Can l not NOR
tify' my own flesh9 Most certainly
If tby'right hand offend thee, cut
it off. Lad e- lgiJs'.al -
'lfl am fined, l shall pay it and
be amartyr st Zipp. OF course,
my wife must be martyr, too. |
will attend to it. ~ II
Fined S., and recommended to
separate from Mrs. Ipp.
A FELLOW in 1Chillicothe under
,OOk to steal a HOG ont of q NO.,