Arizona miner., 1867-07-13
Groupings.

An old topper was heard the other day to
advise young man TO get married, because
then, my boy, you'll have somebody to pull
off your boots when You 90 home drunk"
The Scripture says; The glory Of woman
is IN her hair . but it nowhere says that the
glory of any woman Is in any other woman's
hair.
"You young rascal :" said an old gentle
man 10 rash boy on the street, if that cab
had run over you where would you have
been now - The boy answered, "Up be-
hind, taking Of his number2"
a lady asked noted doctor if he did not
think the small bonnets which the ladies
wore had tendency TO produce congestion
Of the brain. Oh no " replied he, 4" ladies
who have brains don't wear them"
A British tourist, Lord Lorne, is out with
book in which he says he found Boston
dstestable." The people seemed TO him
4sitter with disposition akin to savages"
Tho Pot thinks Lord LOrne ought to be
fenoed IN with State Constable He Is a for
Dorne subject.
A long time ago little boy, twelve years
old On his way to Vermont, stopped at a
country tavern and paid for his lodging and
breakfast by saving wood, instead Of asking
it a. gift. Fifty years later the same boy
passed the same little inn as George Pea
body, the banker, whose name is the synonym
Of magnificent charities-the honOred of two
hemispheres.
IL Shall ladies have votes" asked a stump
speaker, certainly" replied strongminded
woman in the audience, SIS woman made
only to sew on butto1s And if she Is, it Is
against the law Of nature to turn away the
needle from the poll"
A grim old Judge, after hearing fowery
discourse from a pretentious barrister, ad-
vised him 70 pluck out the feathers from the
wings Of his imagination and stick them il
the tail Of his judgment.
A man died recently in Shrewsbury, Mass
achusetts, who had become 50 advanced ii
his second childhood that for some months
ne had persisted in carrying 10 bed with hin
each night rag doll which belonged to ont
Of his grandchildren.
In Kentucky lives a man, the head Of Z
very respectable and intelligent family, who
during one week in each month, about tho
first quarter Of the moon, imagines himself
woman, dons the balmoral, and sits in biz
parlor waiting for his beau This strans,
conduct was first noticed in him when b,
was about seventeen years Of age. He i
now fifty one.
Deacon Brown lately took occasion 70 adj
minister reproof to old Joe for swearing
Joe listened attentiyely 70 his words, SCENE,
to appreciate the exhortation, and when b.
had concluded, replied as follows: The fac
is, Deacon, may swear a great deal, an,
you may pray great deal, but neither Of u
mean anything by it." The Deacon aIludei
TO Joe as an instance Of total depraYity.
A Vermont man recently bought twenty
six railroad tickets, intending 70 take hi
wife and twenty four children to the West
Among the two dozen are eleven pairs o
twins-all boys.
Upon fat stone in the nave Of CONWAY
Church, Wales, is the following inscription
"Here leth the body Of Nicholas HoOkes. o
Conway He was the 4lst child Of BIZ
father by Alice his wife, and father Of q
children. lie died on the Goth Of March
1887"
Here's TO internal improvements, a,
Dobbs said when be swallowed dose Of salts
~ have not loved lightly" a. the man
said when he married widow weighing
three hundred pounds.