Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1867-11-07
Mntuprans department.

Mntuara1ss 2epartulent.
HOW OLD JAKE WON THE CHEESE.
Some years since was employed as ware,
house clerk in large shipping house in New
Orleans, and while in that capacity, the fol
lowing funny scene occurred:
One day vessel came in, consigned to
the house, having on board large lot Of
cheese from New York. During the voy'
age some of them had become damaged by
blge water, (the ship having proved leaky,.
consequently the owners refused to receive
them they were therefore sent to the con
signees of the ship, to be slowed until the
case could be adjusted. I discovered few
days afterwards, that as to perfume they
were decided too fragrant to remain in the
warehouse in the middle of June, and re-
ported the same to my employers, from
whom received orders to have them over.
hauled, and send all that were passable tc
Beard and Calhoun auction mart, (then in
the old Camp street Theatre), to be dis
posed of for the benefit of the underwriters,
and the rest to the swamp. I got gang
of black boys to work on them, and when
they stirred 'em up, "Be the bones of Mol
Kelly's quart pot! but the smell was lille
CANT intirely." kept respectable dis
tance, believe me, for strong niggers and
strong cheese, on hot June day, just bangs
all common essences, including a certain
fsyarmint" we read about.
Presently the boys turned out an i'm.
mense fellow, about three feet six inches
aacross the stump from which the box
had rotted in the centre space about ten
inches was very much decayed, and appear.
ed to be about the consistency of mush, Of
a blush tint-caused by the bilge water
The boys had just set it up on its edge on
q bale Of gunny-bags, when I noticed over
the way big darkey (then on sale) from
Charleston, South Carolina, who was noto'
rious for bis butting propensities, having
given most of the niggers in that vicinity a
taste of his quality in that line. l had seen
him and another fellow, the night previous,
practicing; they would stand, one on each
side of a hydrant, some ten yards distant
and run at each other with their heads low
cred, and clapping their hands upon the hy-
drant they would butt like veteran rams.
A thought struck me that I might cure him
of his Dragging and butting, and at the same
time have some fun, so l told the boys to
keep dark, and called "Old Jake" over.
s'They tell me you are great fellow for
butting, Jake"
81 is some, Massa. dat fac-I done
butt de wool 'tirely orf oh old Peters head
lass night, and Massa Nichols was gwine to
Glib me goss! kin jiss bang de head orr
any nigger il. n.dese parts, myself kin y
"Well, Jake, I've got little job in that
line for you, when you haven't anything
else to do"
ssI'se on hand for all dem kind oh jobs,
myself is" :.
'Well, you see that large cheese back
there?" ~ '
81 dus dat! I dus myself"
sNow if you can butt dent in it you
shall have it"
"Golly, Massa! you foolin' dis nigger?'
ssNo, I'm not, Jake-just try me"
"Wot! you glib me hull Of dat cheese If
butt dent in 'um?'
eyes"
ssDe Lor I'll bust EN- wide open, / vii
myself. Jess stand back dar, you Orleans
niggers, and clear de track for Ole Soul
Carolina, case Use comm myself is. u
And Old Jake started back some fifty
feet and went at good quick run, and the
next instant I heard dull, heavy sound, &
kind of squash, and Old Jake's head disap
peared from sight, with the top just visible
on the other side, as he rose with his new
fashioned necklace, the soft rotten cheese
oozing down all around him, as it settled
down, so that just his eyes were visible
From the center of it Jake's voice wa'
scarcely audible and half smothered, as ht
vainly tried to remove the immense cheese
100000! er de Lor! Mass-took 'un
orr. O-o-o-o! bress de Lor! Lif 'um up
Cora mighty L.
Meanwhile I was nearly dead, myself
having laid back on cotton bale holding
myself together to keep from bursting
while the boys stood round Old Jake, pay
ing him off.
ssDe Lor! how de nigger's bref smell
You doesn't clean your teef, Old Jake!
81 say, you didn't make more dan fou
times dat han, did you, old hoss?"
'Wen, you IS nasty niger dat fac !!
"Well, you is de biggest kline of Welsl
Rabbit-you ISL
"Whar you git your bar greese?"
And thus the boys run Old Jake-noy
half smothered-when took compassion
on him, and told them to take it off. Jak
didn't stay to claim his prize, but put ou
growing.
. "Gor-a-mighty! I done got sole dat time
Use case OBJ yellow feber-I is, myself!
DHT A very worthy fisherman by tn
name of Grizzle, was drowned some tim
since, and all search for his body prove
unavailing. After it had been in the waite
some months, however, it was discovere
floating on the surface; and taken to tn
shore, whereupon Mr.. Smith was dispatch
ed to convey the intelligence to the mucl
afflicted widow.
eWell, Mrs. Grizzle, we have found MI
Grizzlies body"
"You don't say SOL"
eyes we have-the jury has sot on ii
and found it full of eels!'