Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1867-08-09

Length NV forearm,
Length Nv bone from ankle to
knee, 10
Capassity of skull, % cubic IN
Pollock wuz delighted! "Here," sed
he, sit is in nut she'll. lssaker has
shorter hand, more narrer hand, short |
err and narrer foot, and his heel prCj, cks
less than the ngger's by p inches ! Good
Lord, how hev bin deserved Wat err
rors hev bin nussin How kin human
bein hev intelleck whose heel projecks four
inches? How rejo;ct am that | am at
last set rite on these important pints 7
smiled benignantly onto him.
Bigler riz. al, too" sed he, sam sat-
isfed that the Niger is not wat we, who
wus disposed to consider him fit TO exercise
rites, supposed him to be. | held firm
when the measurement of his hands and
arms wuz bein made, but the heel stagger-
ed me. Its clear tina, no one kin have io-
tellek whose leg isn't set in his foot better
than that. l shell pursoo this investiga-
shen. H-vin now startin pint--a heel,
ez may say. to stand OIL shel go on to
prove the inferiority Nv the niger. With
heel for fulcrum, l shell, with the lever
of trcoth, proceed to upset the fabric Nv
niger equality and carry confooshen into
Boston. / shell assoom that Napoleon is a
average specimen Nv the lower or unintel-
iectool African type. Is it so ~
at is it is" yelled we all, delited at
the happy turn the thing wuz takin.
81 shell also assoom that Issaker Gavitt
is avrage Nv the higher or intellectual
Caucasian type. Is it sos"
Certainly Certainly y
"Very well. Now quake Massachoo-
sets. Napoleon, kin you read p
saw the trap into which we had fallen,
and risin hastily protested that the exami-
shen he'd bin carried far enuff, and so did
Deekin Pogram, but Bigler swore he was
agoin to kiver Massachusetts with shame
and sot down paralyzed.
! g Kin 700 read, Napoleon ?"
Yes sab !''
Read this, them" sed Bigler, handiu
him noosepaper.
The niger read it ez peart ez Noe
England skool marin, which well he mite
ez he learned it from one Nv EN-.
Kin 700 writer
Certinly," and takin pencil he wri:
half Nv the Declarashen NV Independence.
Set down, Napoleon. It's devilish
pity your heels is so long otherwise yood
be credited with havin intellek. Now Is.
saker, my bold Caucashen, kin 700 read p
q protest" shrieked / in agony. els
saker don't answer the skoffer at ethnoo
gy !"
But Issaker, ez white ez a sheet ant
tremblin under the eye NV Bigler, whC
knowd him from infancy, suffered GU
/" mol"
Kin 700 rite, my gay descendant u,
the sooperior race p
And still under the inhooence nv Big
ler's eye, he answered "No =
. Kin you cipher y
"What in thurder's the yoose Nv cipher
in when the old man alluz KEEP niger tc
do his fggerin ?"
Set down, ISsaker. We're done with
you. There's an error sumwher. The
niggers capassity Nv skull is less by sevra
cubic inches, but he seems TO hev used wa
he hez lively. But it's all rite, Parson.-
Issaker shel vote and the niger shant.-
Reedin and writin never wuz a qualifica
ton for votin down here, any way. Pos
sibly the seat Nv the intellek is in the hee
insied Nv the brain, witch accounts for th
niggers heyin the most Nv it,
And Pollock and Bigler and the niger
present left the mee,in house, latin up
roarously and THROWN all sorts NV adoo
back to US.
doubt whether the result NV the inves
tigashen will help our friends North. Th
fact is, it wuz overdone. 1t wuz carrie,
too fur. There is pint at wich fact
ought to stop-Dimek,atic facts in partik
eler. In this instance the investigator
shood never have bin carried beyond thu
heel. He'd it stopt there, we wood hev het
EN-. But carryin il to the radical pin
Bigler and Pollock took it, the foundashel
We built wuz upset and we are all at Sc;
ag5n. Wood, oh ! wood that we wuz rio
Of these ieerin fanatics.
PETROLEUM V. Massey, p. NJ.
(Which is Postmaster
The 1858 PENNIEs.-The Sandusk,