Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1867-09-10
: better from NIr. BIobb..
COLUMBUS, CIRCULATION CoRNER.l
sam f September 3. 1897.

/ Arnid6le Spiuins: am blowed. If there
Is a trombone in town worse blowed than
[ am, want to kick it, out of spite. 1 am
In the unfortunate conjugation of the
Greek verb tupto, and can sympathize with
every drum in town. You see, a concate-
nation of circumstances has not only set me
down in close proximity to neighbors wh,
fancy cats (among whom, 1 mean the cats
are several Thomases and Belindas, who
arequite nseaosicsl), }, but Pm just betwixtaDd
between two bands-music bands, as they
are usually denominated by polite people.
thought had brass enough for one cor
ner, but l find the tenor of my life is "a
drum. My room Is not bandbox, nor are
my ears bandaged, hence the bands afore-
said have nearly blowed me out. One OF
these bands is Colored band (their music
may be white for aught know and the
other Is German. They both extensively
play, albeit it is akin to the frogs part OF
the fun to me. If L only had all their airs
bottled up, could start breeze any time
and knock old Eolus' harp over the sconct
of Arion. l try to make choice between
their music, but l find myself like the girl
who couldn't choose between her low
ers. they were both so ugly. My
"colored" serenaders haven't great va
riety of tunes, but what they lack in va
riety they make up in assiduity. They
always begin with some air-its an ill
wind" to me-and they play it till it rings
In my ears for hours; then try 70 whistle
II, but find can't pick it up more'n could
pint of spilled soap. Their airs are gen.
orally great strains on harmony; in fact,
their tunes are generally SO foreign that
the hand-organs haven't yet introduced
EN-. The good old tunes of "Uncle Ned"
"Johnny get your hoe-cake DONE" and SO
forth, seem to'be played out, and laid down
with 'de shovel and de hoe.'' For this am
greatly sorry. used to like white fellows
when they blacked themselves and played
such tunes, and used to think how gem
uine old plantation hand could take 'em off.
Why, IT l was darkey-I mean colored
gentleman-I could make fortune by fol-
lowing the Radical orators as a side show.
But drat your Columbus niger! He's al
ways trying to play white folks, just like
mule trys to play hoss. Why, genuine
darkey can make more money playing dar-
key, twice over, than he can if he NEEDLES
with white paint or Radical politics. Why.
I'd go half a mile any time to hear jolly
old darkey pat juba to the quills, while
a lot of 'em Joined in good old-fashioned
reel!
The other band has as great a variety of
airs as any German clock I ever saw, but
somehow they can't always get at 'em.
They run Yankee Doodle into Saint Pat
rick's Day, and then compromise by play
ing few notes of the March in Norma
They can't raise tunes easy. If it is as hard
to lift their lager, pity 'em; one toots, then
another toots, and then they toot little
all round, till / begin to think that raising
q real good fashioned old tune among 'em
Is about as hard as getting up five dollar
in printing office on Monday
Once in a while they start up an
old air which 1 recognize with the hesitating
doubt with which approach an old, old
friend. / recognize the air-there is some
thing familiar about it-and yet it comes
in such shape that can't think but what
it has seen better days. -sif
But both bands are improving rapidly
The "Colored Band" ventured out one
night without any detriment to the Milky
Way. and may ere long appear by daylight.
They will keep Haysey yet awhile. Mean
time they practice on Hayes March in very
slow time. The German Band is getting
along better-yet not fast enough. They
are now competant to put procession
time, !" and are capable of blow
ing their own horns. They know they are
improving, and hence don't play so often
and late as they did. don't go to bed ev-
cry night now, to the dnlcat sounds of mu-
sic, to hear it vibrate in my prayers, min
gle in my sleep and wall into my dreams,
Till silence comes like q pouItice 4r
r-t.s To heal the wounds of sound"
Don't think I'm unserious, my beloved
Spivins. 1 rather like music.
THE man that hath not music in his soul l,i
h fit for strategems, treasons, spoils," --
and several other things too numerous to
mention; but who wants to have his soul
made common sewer of "sweet sounds ?''
never fattered any man yet who under
took to play asofo on trombone or he-fid-
die, and don't think I'll break into the
rule at this late day. = -
Thine, in affiiction,
514 e1iio5- URIAH BLoBBs.