The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1867-01-26

earnest ap0l0gIst cannot claim for 1t even
q show Of common sense Untrammelled
by law, ungTaced b symmetry, and lack
ing adaptation, it still holds its place as
one Of the branches of education. Oh,
that some expert literary axeman would
lop off that deformed branch. Branch
Of education Rather say branch Troa;
education. These o-u-g-h's, these double
rs, these seven sounds of a, the q's, the
c's, etc, etc, make q meck at the very
naine of education. We are safe in put
ting down English spelling as a popular
folly. Shall we have the temerity TO inti-
mate that there may be popular f6llies in
our high-tOned halls Of learning Shall
we dare to enquire, in reference to old,
time-hopored chic, haec, hoc," what is
the use of all this And this Why, oh
| ye freshmen, will yop continue to disturb
the classic names Of old Horace or Virgil
| With. your uuhalIowed constructions p
And dare we farther to ask; What is the
practical purpose Of all these untold years
cf toll spent with Zenophen, Sophacles,
etc, only 70 think of the forgotten Greek
as we call up some ghostly dream of the
olden time: is it not possible that Latin
Or Greek, for great majority of students,
is hoary-headed folly?
| Allow me TO call your attention to the
popular notions about the musical eduea-
ton Of girls. 1t is assumed in practice
that every girl may become musician.
1t is developed in practice that every girl
can not become a MUSICIAN. Mighty Ap-
polio how. many thousand pianos are
yearly bumped and thumped, and banged
and damned, and thrashad and smashed,
in thy service. Reverend chronicIar of
timel how many lost years hast thou to
charge. against miscopceiyed notions of
music. .'What 7" says some anxious
paser fangtlids, '.ean not all the girls learn
music just as they can be taught to read2"
No, sir; it is not true. You can no more
teach every one to play well, or to sing
well, than you can teach every one to be-
come painter, Or poet. a musician is
born, not made. You may teach anybody
to thump or scream, but only the feH play
or sing. But the people have "piano Oh
the brain" and many girls would seem to
have piano on their toes, from their fash
ioHable screaming. As Ward would have
it: t'The tendency is muchly toward pi-
ano; muchly away from making bread, or
getting up good meals victuals; much.
ly toward spelling good housekeepers and
making wretched piano butchers muchlY
toward popular folly"
Well, surely, the same objections can.
not be brought against the universal study
Of the French language? No, indeed1
This is the indispensable study This is
the sine qua non. Yes, sir-or madam
only let your daughter be taught to CAB
gle undistinglishaple French, and to
thump out undistinguishabla diseords, and
she 10 then fitted for the responsible du.
tics Of wife and mother. What homelv
comfort there must be in sour bread and
piano! What domestic bliss in yellow
biscuit and garbled FrenchI What a
soothing effect it must have on Benedict,s
nerves, after dashing about in the sea OF
business, or medicine, or law, or agrieuI-
ture, to be gabbled to, when he comes
home, tired and weary and heart faint. in
horrible French declensions What moral
heroism is inculcated in coniugatine
French verbs ! What grand life-lessons
there must be in learning to 'tParlez
y Fraucaisw p Yes, yes; by all means let
US have French. Neyery mind our own
noble lalguage-study French. Pay but
little attention to the graces of converse
tion-stHdy French. There is no use in
learning to write an elegant letter-studY
French. Never mind physiology and hy-
H giene; it Doesn't matter about health
: study French. Don't be absurd enough
to learn to cook by all means ignore the
wash-tub get piano-study French.
Do all this, and you will be neither charm
ling in society or loveable IN the home
circle. You will be prepared to take your
] place in the ranks of fashionable folly
And what greater folly is there than
fashion itself? It is simply this: !: You
must wear what some absurd French per
: son wears, because he or she leads the
! ton. This species of slavery is impera.
Tive in its requirements IF this illustri-
GUS foreigner emperor he may be, or
scavenger he may have besRl says short
tailed coats-oH come the tails; if he says
!, peg-top hreeches- -peg-tOp goes should
be decree square-toed boots-square them
at onoe, even though you SHOULD NOT BE-
} adtO w S1AoAO Jul dOVOuus Will IOOI
boot-maker. If, madam, your fashionable
dictator EEmpress--or courtezan, for any,
/. thing Won know commands hoops-im.
: medlately place yourself IN the charmed
J circle. If the edict is for trains-for
} heavens sake lose no time in training
yoqrselfi So, ladies and gentlemen, we
[ must initiate these European leaders of
!, questionable antecedents, change the CON-
i fort of our dress at our option, throYW
. away our manIiness, and Homanhood, and
] take our place on the side of popular folly.
& At this point the rhyming machine was
: set in motion, with the following result !:
!. Of customs and manners, of fashions and forms,
You have heard fOt this many while; -
: But my rhyme embraces theme yet upsgng--
i lis simply this: "0regOn Style"
: Tfto frisco you go. tits the fashiop, you know,
q To pretend that you've got quite pile;
Put on airs swing 9 cane, wear right bOb-tailed
coat =
They'll be pleased AZ With your gay Web-soo. style
When girl, down the river %, is feHrtssR years
On the sparks she commences to smile;
And she seems to exclaim rs she irts by their gaze
/ "Tis hard to beat oaegon style
She kicks up dust, or sheplnws through the mud,
= Her train sdra kging badk half q mile, =
Sweeping eats rats and rubbish along as she saila
!, I'm glad it'snot Linn county stylel ~ e"''s
Of headgsa we've all sorts Of fashions and forms