Buchanan County bulletin and guardian., 1867-01-29

The man who first introduced fan
ming mills into Scotland was denounc-
cd as an atheist: he was getting up
gales of wind when Providence willed
calm.
A printer, in setting up the sentence
We are but parts of stupendous
whole" by mistake of a letter made
it read, I'VE are but parts of stu-
pcndous whale"
A COW in Cincinnati. in a mistake.
the other day, took a feed Of pine saw-
dust instead of bran. In the evening
she gave turpentine instead of milk.
A cobbler once returned thanks
through the newspapers to the FIRE de-
partment for saving his stock. This
caused great laughter. till person OBJ
served that his stock was his awl.
Luck lies in bed and wishes the
postman would bring him news of a
legacy. Labor turns out at six O'Clock,
and. with busy pen or ringing hammer,
lays the foundation of a competency.
Pa said a lad to his father, IL
often read Of people poor but honest
why don't they say rich but honest:"
tut, tut. my son." said the father,
"nobody would believe them"
Two citizens courting the daughter
Of an old philosopher, he preferred the
worthy man 10 the rich one, and assign
ed this reason: +" would rather She
should have man without money,
than money without a man.
Brasidas, the famous Lacedomonian
general caught a mouse; it bit him,
and by that means made its escape.
"Oh," said he, "what creature so con-
teinptible but may have its liberty, if
it will contend for it.''
In his report upon the condition
of South Carolina, General Sckles
relates that iu one case, where a Freed
man was murdered. the two men who
killed him sat upon the coroner's jury
and united in the verdict that s'the de-
ceased came to his death by cause
unknown"
The Washington correspondent
Of the Philadelphia press writes that
"a distinguished stateman, comment
ing upon the recent decision of the Su-
preme Court declaring military tribn-
mails unconstitutional, characterized il
as, the tail Of the Dred Scott serpent
atill wiggliug in the present genera
ton"
Misery assails riches, as lightning
does the highest towers; or as q tree
that is heavy laden with fruit breaks
its own boughs, SO do riches destroy
the virtue Of their possessor.
Upwards Of two thousand immi-
grants from Europe arrived at New
York on New Years day-nearly all
Of them in steamers. The passage
money. in the aggregate. must be .
handsome sum; but it all goes into
the Golfers of foreign steamship line.
1t is related oftwo old Scotch min.
isters that the one asked the other if
he were not sorely tempted ut times to
60 fishing on the Sunday afternoons.
"Oh, mon.' replied his fellow laborer,
I'm never tempted lang, I just gang
Professor Risley, it is said, has ef.
fected an engagement with q troupe
Of Japanese athletes and actors, and
was to leave Yokohama, Japan. early
in November. for San Francisco, in
tending to give exhibitions in the
United States.
+. Sichel has formed new glycer-
ole by mixing four parts of yolks of
eggs and five parts Of pure glycerine
in mortar. The mass has the con-
sistency Of honey, and is unctuous like
fat bodies. 1t was unaltered by an
exposure to the air for three years.
Applied to the skin it farms varnish
impcrvious to the air.
"Do you like Goldfish balls, Mr. Wig
gins %
NJ. Virgins, hesitatingly-"I really
don't know, miss; Idon't recollect ever
attending one.