The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1867-06-19


prove acceptable:
Let me kiss her for her MOTHER
The sweet Lucrctia AMI
Let me kiss her fer her mother
- Or any otEer man.
LET me kiss her for somebody,
Anybody in the world,
" ith her hair Sc SwCctly auburn,
And so gloriouSy curled.
."I.et rne kiss her for her Teller,
And do not care q red,
t. Ii he taps me on tic smelIer
With his billy made Of lead
Let me kiss her for her da;ldy-
Tho pretty poutin9 elf
Or, if that don't suit the family,
Let me kiss her for myself!", -
That young man has level head and
shows that he appreciates the good things
Of this lilc, in this particular at !east
\ celebrated physician in Scotland,
after careful examination Of the vital
statistics Of married and single men, an
nounccs that the average life Of married
men is>a little more than sixty years,
while tina: Of bachelors is less than forty
eight.
One OF the most powerful arguments
in favor of marriage, we have ever heard.
Our singt lady readers need not be sur
prisco if innumcrablc offers are now.
made on the Strength Of
We have good authority for knowing,
that ,the.daughter Of Enoch was eighty
years old when she was married.
I If this be not balm to thc dropping
spirits, then we confess beingnon:plusscd.
1t is never too late. ,,.-
have been under civil government;
ecclesiastical government, military gov
ernmcnt and petticoat government and
| like petticoat government the,best.,
So said an Old Florida Methodist, once
an army chaplain, but lattcrly in charge
Of q female seminary, and :vc agree with
him. TIE reasoning is sound and corr
elusive: Give US more pctticoat govern
mcnt. s....
Why is newspaper like wife? Be.
cause every man should have Que of his
own. -.
true as proofs of Holy Writ. The
man without wife or newspaper is a
poor "miscrablcn' ~ -
Husbands wIro babitna1ly leave their
wives alone, TO attend clubs, have club
on the brain, and ought to have it on the
skull -. . =
= another truism. You see ladies we
arc on your side this time, and we feel,
better, much better already; oh that we
may not be led through folly to again
transgress. -.-..<. ~..,>.....--
The arm ola pretty girl wound tight
round Your neck, has. bccn;di$covered to
be an infaliiblc remedy in case of sore
throat. 49,.
= AN inf;s44iii5ir remedy, young maa, ard
one highly recommended as haring been
tried. Bat the remedy sometimes is as
bad as the disease, as VIC have known
patients afterwards suffer from. hear taebc.
...'.N. ooh Sally Rice =; >,'..-
-. I've called you twice, ,.- T.. ~. :.
And yet you lay and snorel - :,
pray you wake, -.
( And see your Jake, ....-.
-.: And open to him the door; or the win,
dow, | don't care much which,
It makes but little difference
To either you or L .-..-,.- e.
Big pig, Little'pig, e.. "
Root, hog, Or die. ~ ...-. -,
This. was intended as a scrcnade, tat
tho amateur received cool comfort, for
after getting through this far, he was
heard to sing "Thou raincst in this
BOSOM" A basin Of water was: thrown
over him, which he certainly. deserved : =
A young lady asked a. gentleman the
meaningo of the word Surrogate" -" and he
explained it to her as, "a. gate through
WHICH parties soto get et1narried-H, Then
Iinagpc,n said the lady. "thatis a corr
rHption OF thc>word souowgate. - You
are right, . said, he, "aS woman is an 40:
bTeyiation Of wo 10 nam X: =, -. :.
As4He are or good behavior, the later
sentiment is not endorsed, =. =. >>>>
43Ha@dip;n,'''' said a. gentleman to, his
wife, ''lct me tell you facts are stubborn.
things" "Dcafie inc, you don't say so?''
Quoth the lady what alact .yoa must
he??H : =: = -
= Wires have 50 radel, to bear that It is,i
not StrangeT they SOMETIMES make sharp
replies. : - :. Il
tAIY dear. what makes you always yawn?'' 1
The wife exclaimed her temper gone, 1
Us home so dull and drcary p :,
"NOt so, my love, he said, mot so; <i
But man and wife are one, YOU know;
And when alone; Frn weary"
The brute Were NC that mans wife
wc'd-wc'd-scratch his eyes out.
Many girl thinks she can do nothing
without husband, and when she gets
one she finds she can do nothing with
him.
Just so. Hard to manage, stubborn,
incorrigiblc, every mothers son of them
Talk about their being led with silkcn
cords and all that sort of thing. Its all !
bosh; they arc died in the wool. We
arc your friends, ladies, and go in for
reform.
y Yankee being asked to describe his !.
wife, said, "Why, sir, she'd make regu
lar fast, go-ahead steamer, my wife !
would, she has such wonderful talent |
for blowing up"
Not surprised at this at all; he's
Yankrn Wore he ono of rS ,rn'd eov ho