The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1867-05-23
From the Toledo Blade.
NASBY.
The Russian PurchaSe-HOTY it
was DOne-Nar. Nasby Really the
originator of the Speculation.

"a r WAsHINGToN, April IA, 1867
It's done! Seward did it-him and me Thu
American egle hez coz now to screen with re
doubled energy. Eff the nashnel burd wuz a an
gel, | shood remark to it, "Toon your harl
anoo," but it aint and therefore, sch request
would be ridiculous. This fapsody hez reference
to the Rooshen purchase
The idea originated in these massive ntelleck.
When wuz here afore the Blairs all NV EN-, wuz
! O crowdln the salntid johnson fur msshun
| Cowan wanted Il misshun, and so did Doolittle,
and that day pretty much all NV the delegates to
the Cleveland and Philadelphy conversions he'd
DIN there wantin some kind Nv place, wat, they
Wuzn't partceler. One gentleman whose nose
(Which trooly blOssomed ez the lobstcr) betoken.
ed long service in the party, urged that he he'd bin
a delegate to both cOnyenshens. THANK God y
said johnson. wood that both NV them con-
venshens he'd bin made up NV the same men,
wood then hev bin bored fur places only half as
| much ez am."
Iwuz helpn him out In my weak way. When
the crowd wahtin places become too CRATE fur hu-
man endoorance, l wood say in modrit tone,
lets go out and git suthin," and to-wunst fully
half wood eXclaim, "fhank VOC. don't keer ef |
do" II wus great relief to Johnson but wuz
pizen on me, With the most Nv EN- the anguish,
anxiety and solissitude in the gittin NV osis and
free drinks wuZ about an ekal thing. The oilises
they wanlil wuz merely the means to that per-
tikelcr end, and so long cz they wuz gittin the
latter without the trouble NV the former, they
WIZ content. A good constooshen and copper
lined stumick carried me thro this tryin ordeel,
until came across Boston applicant who, in
conscience Nv the pCrhibitory law, he'd bin fur
some time on short rOshens, and wuz keen set &.
Napoleon he'd then met his WelllntOu and | sue
cumb. The mans talent wuz wonderful.
Sekretaiy Seward wuz In trouble about tn
Blair family, pertikelerly. He he'd did his level
Dest lur EN-. lie he'd appinted em to Collekter-
silps and turrln misshuus, but the crooel Senit
which he'd no respeck fur u.s. TUX delite in fasten-
nlS NV em onto us by perpetooay felectin EN-.
Jest after long seige by Montgomery and the
s 0iu man, se1estid the purehis NV the Rooshin
territory, to wich not only they Good be sent
Duta Thousand uv Others wieh we he'd on our
hiands, and the Sekretary wuz so pleased at the
IDEA that lie Wept like child. With q vigger
wonderful in one so old, he set about gittn test-
monals e2 to the yalyoO Nv the territory to in
hooence the SENT in Tatifyin the treaty he wuz
agoin to make. And he wrote to u naval olliser
about it, who answered more promptly than |
ever knowed naval ofiser to do, ez follows:
It's trooly splendid country. The trade in
the skins NV white bears kin be, ef properly de-
Yeloped, made enormous There is seals there,
ana waruses so tame that they come up NV their
own akkord to be ketched.
up. SIN case the purchis shood be made, n
naval stashen will be necessary. May ] hope that
my long services on the Flordy Coast would
prove suflishent recomfhendashen for the COM
mand Of the depot? MoyI?
hev the honor to be, &c.
distinguished Professor wrote,
THE climate is about the style NV that they
hev in Washington. The Gulf Stream sweeps up
the coast, causn decided twist in the isothernal
line, wich hez the efeck NV making it ruther sui
try than otherwise. Anvwheres for six hundred
miles bacR NV the coast Strawberries grow in the
open air, recommend strongly the purchis."
"P. SIN case the purchis is made u e&plorin
expedishen will be necessary. May hope that
my scientihk attainments are sufllshently well
known to yoO to rekommeud me ns proper per-
son to he'd the expedlshen2 May |? hey the
honor to be, ct settry
The President wuznt fdvorably inclined. lie
wuz full NV the old fogy idea that it WIZ rather
chilly there than otherwise He hednt faith in
the isothermal line, and wuZ skcptieal about the
Gulf Stream. 1t wuz his experience that the fur
ther North you got the colder it wuz. For in
stance, he remarks, that while the people wuz
warm toward him in Vrginny and Maryland, last
fall. they become very cold ez he got North
Wher wuz the isothermal line and the Gulf
Stream then2
Randall, who will hey his joke, remarkt that
the isothermal line twisted. lie notist that the
people made il ez hot for EN- cz he wantid it ez
far North ez Cleveland to wich Sekretary Welles
replied that it only confirmed him in the opinion
that fur platin vessels NV war, iron wuz prefera-
BILE TO pine plank any time.
Seward removed the Presidents objections to
wunst He read his letters wich set forth the
beauties and advantages NV the country twict
over, Here wuz whales, and walruses and seals
and white bears, and apples, and wheat, md sea
lions and fields of ice the year round in climate
ez mild and equable ez the meridian Nv Washing
ton. The ithosermal line wuz more accOInmoda-
tin ther than in any other part nv the world II
cork-screwed through the territory so ez TO grow
fine peaches for expectation to the States and ice
to the Sandwich Islands, side by side. He drawd
pictur Nv the white bear n rtishin over the line
and dlssportn hsself in fields NV green peas.
lmagln, he remarkt, the decaey NV Polar bear
meat lattened on strawberries--think NV the con-
dishen the sea lions must be in wch leave their
watry lars to feed on turnips wich grow above
the Goth parallel-think NV
~ won't do, sed the President.
"Ihlnk Nv, retOrtid the sellretary with quick
mis- Nv intellelS remarkable, THINK Nv GIrrIN RID
Nv THE BLAIRs FoBEvER!"
"Wlll the Ablishn SENT ratify the treaty?" ask
johnson eagerly.
II converst with many on the subjck, and they
sed ef we Good promise that the BlOirs wood &c
cept posishens ther they wood do it cheerfully.
For sich purpose, sed one Nv EN- tome, 81 7,000,-
700 is mere bagatelle."
'I'll do it," sed johnson. II agree with the
Senators for once. Rather than hey vitfall I'd pay
1t out Nv Mrs. Cobb's share in our jint spekela-
shens, Freedom from the Blair family Good
Hevings kin one man be SO blest2 Is ther sich
in store fur me? $7,000000? Pish!"
My opinyun bein askt giveit Ez hefty ez the
yencher is from commershel stan-plnt, in po-
ltlkle pint Nv view the advantages win be still
heftier. The Rooshen territory will finally be
the chosen home Nv the Dimocrisy. Their Is al
ready populashen there ddaptid to us, who kin be
manipulated without trouble and cllmit is favor
able to strictly Democratic populashen The
trouble with us here is that the amount of likker
necessary to the fnanufakter nv ne DemOcrat kills