The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1867-06-14
SPARE LINES.

vent waists.
1t is exceeding hal h,sbandry to harrow
up the feelings Of your wife.
Is the property Of barber "forfsited to
the State" when he dyes and leaves no
heirs? ...l .. .... .r.. .u .,
Men dying make wills; why cannot
wives? because wives have their wills
during their lives. ..r...f
Reproof Is medicine, like mercury or
opium; ifit be improperly administered, Il
will do harm instead ofgood.
You need not tell the truth, unless to
those who have right to know II all. But
Ie, aIl you tell b truth. " .'.'r.r. Do.
lf,he sun Il down, look up at the stars,
II the eanh h dark, keep your eyes on
heaven. With Gods presence and Cots
promise, man or child may bc cheerful.
Why do people afix tho words "no
cards" at the emi Of marriage announce.
meni3 Because they hare played all their
curds before marriage.
Why was tho COW the only animal that
Noah would allow to sit at the tnble with
his family, Because she was the only one
that could cnlve.
Josh Billings tru,hfllly remarks that
"trying to live on the reputation OF dead
grandfather is just about as enterprisins as
trying to hatch out rotten eggs under a tin
weathercock." p" ....... ....
DO not think Of knocking out anoth"r
person's bruins beca,lse he differs IN opinion
from you. Il would he as rational to knock
yourself on the head because you differ
from yourself ten years ago.
Mind what you run after. Never be
content with hauble that will burst, or
fircwork .ha, will end in smoke and dark.
ness. Get That which you con keep and
which is worth keeping.
A good sor Of man in New liamP-
shire WIS recently asked to snhscrifs Tor
chandelier 10 the church. "Now," said he
,'what s the use Of chandelier Afler
you get It you can't get any one to play on
It."
The late Daniel O'Conncll once met a
concei,ed liteury friend, and exclaimed,
II saw capital thing IN your last pamph'
let" "Did you1" eagerly replied his de-
lighted listener, "wl,at was i'll" ~ pound
Of but,cr!" .r. .
A man recently broke or a marriage be.
carse tho lady did not possess good con.
ycrsationaI powers. A wicked c,Itor IN
commenting upon the fact says, ~ le should
have married. her, aud then refused her n
new bouI,et, to have developed her power
Of talk" ...
An Irishman, carrying a heavy bundle
upon his shoulders, was riding on the front
of Bosion horsc car, AMI was asked why
be dill not set his load upon the platform.
"I,e jaber," was his reply, ..rhc hores
have enough to do 10 drag mei III carry
the bundle" - "A, .rm...,r
Our mother, when us used 70 stun
Her head With oil our noisy fun,
Did wish us oil asone from home;
While nov that some be dead. and soms
Be guus, sad ell the place 10 dumb. .
How would she wish, With useless tears,
To hear again Aboat her cars.
DOL, The voices thai b gone!
A man was talking Few days ago about
the horon Of light lacing, stating that
among other things il ca''scd rcdness Of ,l'e
nose. One Of tho gentlemen present r..
marked awrll. I'm glad % learn thai Il Ia
caused by Ugh, Iseins-l thought il had its
origin in another kind Of ,ishincss." Sci-
sn,ific man wil,ed. ur.4 .,t. r.r.,, /.
A dramatic sketeh.--sl shall cane you
soundly," said tho dominic. "Wha, tor ?"
inquired tho delinquent "Por being rude. "
"You ought not to caDc mo soundly Tor
thst!" "Why7" 1Becsuso It's contrary
to the tabls Of weights and measures J"
'.How sof' "You would be making one
rude On schcrm 'You can d, down, I"
ssid The dominic. 1 80 ili0 'le /