Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1867-02-01
A Dance with an Injun.
THE EDITOR OF THE VICKsBURa HERALD AT
MASQUERADE BALL-HIS OWN ACCOUNT.


THE EDITOR OF THE vIcKsBURa HERALD AT A
MASQUERADE BALL-HIs OWN ACCOUNT.
On account, perhaps of the manifold duties
always pressing upon us, we have never
learned to waltz-we had never placed our
arm around a fragile, fairy, feecy, fuctua-
ting form, and whirlgigged around loose, but
at the Grand Masquerade and Fancy Dress
Ball, on last Tuesday night, we happened to
express our regrets at this deficiency in our
education to young plump, fresh and close
ly dominoed Injun girl, while we were prom
enading the vast hall with the luscious hump
sey-dumpsey. She sweetly intimated that
the hubbub of such an occasion, when .faur
pas would scarcely be noticed, was the very
best time in the world to learn. We would
not acknowledge our name if we had backed
out from such an offer, and as matter of
course, we very shyly requested her to afford
us the sublimely perpendicular pleasure of a
small lesson, merely for the purpose of get
ting acquainted with each other, and giving
us a relish for our victuals at supper. Sweet
and gorgeous aborigine-without swearing
she'd ne'er consent-she consented-dry SO.
Gently, delicately, fastidiously and timidly
we placed our arm around her plant waist.
and almost wasted away. Her long raven
locks tickled our elbow. Thousands of mil
lions of spotted boards vibrated and tinkled
around her fairy form, as her bosom rose and
fell to give them melody like an Kolian harp
upon the heaving sea. Her hand was in
ours-as soft as pussy cats back, as she
silently watches mouse hole at the soft
and witching hour of twilight. Her left
foot was against our right boot The gau-
dy feathers upon her moccasins tickled our
manly knees. Our eyes met Two soft
and melting glances shot out of the holes in
her domino, and two soft and melting CLAN
ces shot out of our domino-and coming to-
gether in the middle emitted sparks like the
r. Il. Lee rounding to at Williams wharf
boat on dark night in the latter part of De-
cember Music arose with its voluptuous
swell, and drew nearer to us,-and we arose
with our voluptuous swell and drew nearer
unto the female red man. Her warm breath
was upon our fingers and her long raven
hair went fippy ty-fop over our shoulder
We had not yet waltzed an inch, and we
didn't care Confederate bond if we never
moved from that spot till the editor of the
Vicksburg Herald joined the Sons of Tenn
perance. We shook back our yellow locks,
and Immediately the air was laden with the
balmy odor of Martha Washington Hair
Restorative, for sale by Hardaway 4 Co.,
! and all respectable druggists. We bowed
low our editorial head, and whispered in a
voice whose dulcet and mellihuos notes,
would have melted the heart Of a deputy
constable Georgeous child of the forest,
whose ancestor discovered Columbus, would
we were glove upon that hand, that we
might touch that cheek-would we were a
pair of moccassins upon those feet that we
might caress thy corns-Would we were a
hank of yarn strung with spotted beads, that
we might encirclc that form-would we were
a long bunch of raven hair that we might
flop around that neck-would we were an
open barrel of golden syrup, that thou might
dip thy finger in us and lick it-would we
were coronet, that we might rest upon that
brow-would we were roll of greenbacks
that we might stay in thy pocket would we
were brindle dog, that we might guard thy
wigwam-would we were big black roos-
ters tail, that we might dangle near thy face
would we were an Indian Chief. Thus
far we spaketb, and she sighed, her ruby
lips did part, and she spaketh." eff you
are done wooding up, we'd better let in, for
the music is wasting away" We let in,
and we wasted away. Our two hearts beat
with such responsive throbs, that creased
se-knife could not have entered the throbs.
It seemed as if ten thousand catterpillars
were emigrating up our back, and turtle
doves we're picking meal bran out of our
ears. Huge signs Of the size Of a rutabaga
turnip escaped our lips; heard murmuring
brooks, whispering boughs, and warbling
birds, and tinkling cow bells, and we floated
far away on fecy cloud Of one hundred dol
lar greenback bills The music ceased, but
the Washington Hall kept on waltzing.-
The Indian maid sought her native forest,
and we were carried by our friends to the
Times office, with cramp in the bottom Of
our feet, and our eyes turned wrong side
outwards.