The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1867-03-14

wanted TO get rid of me for something, or you
would not have insisted on my staying at dear
mothers all night. You were afraid should
get cold coming home, were you2 Oh, yes,
you can be very tender, you can, Mr.. Caudle,
when it suits your own purpose. Yes and
the world thinks what a good husband you
are only wish the world knew you as well
as do that's all; but it shall some day, I'm
determined.
"Im sure the house will not be sweet for
month. All the curtains are poisoned with
smoke; and, what's more, with the filthiest
smoke | ever knew. Take em dorm hen2
Yes it's all very well for you to say take 'em
down; but they were only cleaned and put
up month ago; but careful wife's lost upon
you, Mr.. Caudle. You ought to have married
somebody who'd have let your house go to
wreck and rain, as will for the future People
who don't care for their families are better
thought of than those who do; Pye long found
out that.
"And what a condition the carpet $ in
They've taken five pounds out of it, if farth-
ing, with their filthy boots, and don't know
what besides. And then the smoke in the
hearth-rug, and large cinder-hole burnt in
it never saw such house in mn life If
you wanted to have a few friends, why couldn't
you invite 'em when your wite's at home, like
any other man not have 'em sneal1ing in
like a set of housebreakers, directly woman
turns her back. They must be pretty gentle
men, they must; mean fellows, that are afraid
to face a woman Ha and you call your
selves the lords of the creation | should
only like to see what would become of the
creation if you were left to yourselves A
| pretty pickle creation would be in very soon p!
"You must all have been i'm nice condi-
ton! What do you say You took nothing?
Took nothing, didn't you Pm sure there's
such regiment of empty bottles, / haven't
| had the heart to count 'em. And punch, too
| you must have punch There's a hundred
| half-lemons in the kitchen, if there's one: for
Susan, like good girl, kept 'em to show lem
| me. No, sir; Susan ShGR't ledUe the house
| What do you say She has no right TO tell
tales, and you WILL be master Of your Own house?
| Will you? If you don't alter, Mr.. Caudle,
| you'll soon have no house to be master of. A
whole loaf of sugar did leave in the cup
board, and now there isn't as much as would
| fill a tea-cup. Do you suppose Pm to find
| sugar for punch for fifty men! What do you
| say There aCdSRt .ffty? That's no matter;
| the more shame for 'em, sir. Pm sure they
drank enough for fifty. Do you suppose out
of my housekeeping money Pm to find sugar
| for punch for all the world You don't ask me {?
Don't you ask me You do; you know you
do: for if | only want a shilling extra, the
| house is in blaze. And yet whole loaf of
sugar can you throw away upon No, |
'front.' be still; and won't let you go to sleep.
| If you'd got to bed at proper hour last night
you wouldn't have been so sleepy now. You
can sit up half the night with pack of people
who don't care for you, and your poor wife
can't get in a word
"And there's that China image that had
when | was married. wouldn't have taken
any sum of money for it, and you know it
and how do find it With its precious head
knocked off And what was more mean, more
contemplate than all besides, it was put on
again, as if nothing had happened. You kneu
nothing about a? Now how can you lie there,
in your Christian bed, Caudle, and say that
You. know that that fellow, Prettyman,
| knocked off the head with the poker You
know that he did. And you hadn't the feeling
YES will say it-you hadn't the feeling to
protect what you knew was precious to me.
Oh, no if the truth was known, you were glad
to see it broken for that very reason.
every way, I've been insulted. should
like to know who it was who corlled whisllers
on my poor dear aunt's picture! Oh you re
laughing, are your You're not laughing
Don't tell me that should like to know
what shakes the bed then, if you're not
laughing? Yes corked whiskers on her deal
face-and she was good soul to you, Caudle
and you ought to be ashamed of yourself t
see her ill-used Oh, you may laugh IT,
very easy to laugh | only wish you'd littl'
teellng, ike Other people, that S all.
'Then there's my China mug-the mug
had before was married-when was happ,
creature. / should like to know who knocked
the spout off that mug! Don't tell me it wa
, cracked before-it's no such thing, Caudle
there wasn't a flaw in it-and now, coulC
have cried when | saw it. Don't tell me
wasn't worth twOpence. How do you know
You never buy mugs. But that's like men
, they think nothing in a house costs any
thing.
''There's four glasses broke, and min
cracked. At least, that's all Pye found out a
r present; but dare say l shall discover doze
tomorrow.
, "And | should like to know where the cotto
umbrellas gone to-and | should like to llnoV
who broke the bell-pull-and perhaps yo
don't know there's a leg off a chair-and pei
haps"-
81 was resolved" says Caudle, 'to lno-
nothing, and so went to sleep in my ignC
! rance"
r Mrs Caldle'S Curtain Lectures VtU be continue
t daily, fa The Evening Telegraph, until CON
! pteted,I
a TJOnSF- -FnRNISHTNG GOOOS