The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1867-04-08
THE CAUDLE CUKTAIN LECTURES.

Mrs. Candle Has Returned Home
The House COf feOursel .'Not ut TO be
seen---Mr- CaudIe, IN seIEdeEenee,
Takes q Book.
/ "After all. CaudIe, 1t Is something to
get into ones own bed again. I shall
sleep tonight. What You're glad Of
i9 That's like your sneering; i know
what you mean, of course; never can
think of making myself comfortable,
but you wound my feelings If You
cared tor your own bed like any other
man, you'd not have staid out till this
hour. Don't say that 1 drive you out of
the house as soon as we came in, II.
only just spoke about the dirt and dust,
but the fact Is; you'd be happy in a
pig-styt 1 thought 1 could have trusted
that Mrs. Closepeg with untold gold;
and did you only see the hearth -rugS
When we left home there was tiger In
il: should like to know who could
well you to swear at the tiger, but
swearing wont revive the rug again.
Else you might swear.
stYou could go out and make yourself
comfortable at your club. You little
know how many windows are broken
tell you to-morrow-you shall know
now. Pm suFei Talking about getting
health at MarEateI All my health went
away directly went into the Kitchen.
There's dear mothers China bowl
cracked in two places. could have sat
down and cried when 1 saw IT. bowl
can recOlleet when 1 was a child. Eh7
I s6oTEtd have locked Il up Aens Yes;
that's your feeling for anything of
mine. 4 only wish 1t had been your
puuch-bowl; but, thank goodness! Il
think that's chIpped.
"WelI, you haven't answered about
the windows-You can't guess how
many. You don't edreF Well, If any
body caught cold but you, IL would be
little matter. Six windows clean ont
and three cracked Yo1C can't help if
should like 20 know where the MON
ey's to come from TO mend 'em. They
sha'nt be -mended, that's nll Then
youn see how respectable the house
viii look. Bot know very well what
you think Yes; you're glad of II. You
think that this will keep me at home
but I'll never stir out again. Then
| you can go to the seaside by yourself;
then, perhaps, you can be happy with
Miss RrettYman! Now, Candle, If you
4 knock the pillow with your fist in that
way, I'll get up. It's very odd that
/ can't mention that persons name but
/ you begin to fight the bolster, and do
not know what. There must be some
thing in 1t, or you wouldn't kick
tno-but you know what mean.
'sShe wasn't coming to town for q
week; and then, Of sudden, she'd had
a letter. 1 dare say she had. And
then, as she said Ii would be company
| for her to come with rs. No doubt.
She thought I should be i'll again, and
| down in the cabin; but with all her art,
she does not know the depth of me
quite. Not but what I was III; though,
like brute, you couldn't sse It.
what do You say1 Good -Iii0kt LoVeS
4 Yes, you can be very tender j dare say
like all ofyour sex-to suit your own
ends; but can't go 20 sleep with my
head full of the house. The fender IN
the parIor viii never come TO itself
again. IhaYn't counted the knives yet
but I've made up my mind that half Of
'em are lost. Mol don't always think
the worst; no, and I don't make myseIl
unhappy before the time; but, Of course
that's my thanks for caring about Youi
property. If there Rr'n't spiders in ths
y curtains ss big as nutmeEs, I'm wick.