The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1867-08-15
/" sHUGAR IN THEIR,M.n

The following sermon, delivered by a
Hard Shell Baptist, is old, but the follies
and vices which If SO humorously depicts
are just as rampant to-day as they ever
were, and hence we deem it worthy Of
being reproduced
''There's nine men a standin' at the
door, an they all sed they'd take shugar
IN their'n''
Sich, friends and brethering, was the
talk, in wurldly Gems, wonst common in
this our ;,inshunt land but the dais is
gone by, and the sans run dry, and no
man can say to his nabur, hoo art thou,
man, and will you take emmy more shugar
in your kaughfey?
But the wurds of our tex has difrunt
and more partikeIur meenin than this
Thar they stood at the dore, on a cool
winters mOrnin, two Baptiss and two
Methodies and five Lutharians, and the
tother one was publikin. And they all
with one vols sed they wouldn't dirty their
feet in dram shop, but if the publikin
would go and get the drinks they'd pay
for 'em. And they all cried out, and
every man said, ''I'll take mine with shu-
gar, for it wont feel good to drink the
stuff without sweetenin." So the publi-
kin be marched in, and the barkeeper sed,
"Wha want ye % and he answered and
sed, CA drink" CHOW will We have it %
''Plane and strate," says he, ''for it aint
no use wastin' shugar to circumsalivate
akofortis. But there's nine more a stand
in at the door, and they all sed they'd
take shugar in theirn.''
Friends and bretherin, it aint only Hkker
of spirits that is drunk on this roundabout
and underhand way, but it's the likker of
all sorts OF human wickedness in like man
ner. Thar5 the likker of MALLS, that
menny of you drinks to the dregs, but
yure sure TO sweeten il with the shugar of
self.justifcation. Thars the likker Of ava
riss that sum keeps behind the curtain for
constant use, but they always has it well
mixed with the sweetenin Nv prudens and
ekonomy. Thars the Iikker of self-luv
that sum men drinks by the gallon, but
they always puts in lots of the shugar Nv
take keer Nv No. 1. And lastly. thars
the likker w extorshua, which the man
sweetens according to circumstances. II
he's in the -four line, he'll say the pore'n
be better off eatin korn bread; if he's in
the cloth line, why, it's a good thing to
iarn 'em to make their cloth at home if
he's in the lether line, it'll larn 'em the ne
cess.ty Nv takih' better keer Of shoes. And
there's nine men standin' at the door, and
they all sed they'd take shugar in their'n.
But friends and brethering, there's
time comm and a place fxin,' whar
ther'll be no "Standin' at the dore" TO cali
for F'shugsr in their'n." But they'll have
to go rite in and take the drink square up
to the front; and the barkeeper'n be old
Satun, and nobody else and he'll give
'em "shugar in their'n,'' you'd better be-
lieve it, and it'll be shugar of led, and red
hot led at that, as sure as your names
Constance Dodger. And you'll be enti-
tied to your rations three times day, if
not more trequenter and if yon don't like
it you'll have to lump it, and so may the
old Nick close down upon all your silk
palvering around the plane old poole of
brothorly Iuv and ginirosity, and feIler-
feelin' and fare-play. Amen