The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1867-10-26

minutes, under cover OF which Tommy sun"
i out doors again, =, 4,,v so;d
llph,t tI,,I - LOT II will come TO! Sillo
u;.s Cnttie 70 Mrs. Basg, as they walked
80 togetn .r at dusk, tbeinS next door
ioiu, ,ors TO each otler,) there's no telling
III about such an imps future! He's as
H. alr To he a circus man as anything else -
I've no hopes OF him, not a Bit only hope
he won't i've to be hung, thereof
There came time, which comes in the liN,
Of all little boys in this great country, when |
Tommy had to be put in school. His moth.
er had already taught him the alphabet, and
al sehool ne SET out at once on the acquire
ment OF Inc three rs reading, 'riting, and
lithmetic-w which constitute the basis of
education. as everybody knows
MIR. Joy vas thriving dry-eoods dealer, and
he meant to have his boy follow in his own
footsteps. But it was not long before he DIS
covered that Tommy gave no sort OF promise
in that direction. 60 ~.
Tommy was not a studious youth in school /
To reading and writing he took kindly enough,
but arithmetic was stumbling block to him.
Old Mr.. Signet the schoolmaster, declared,
Tommy was the worst scholar" he ever had
in his school. Arithmetic was schoolmaster
Signet's hobby. He used to interrupt the
routine of study in the school to make long
remarks" TO his pupils ON his favorite theme.
There is nothing so beautiful as a mathe-
NAUTICAL demonstration" he would say. "A
sum will always prove ITSELF If you make
blunder, no matter how slight, figures will
show it TO YOU. Figures never blunder. Just
SO certain as you do the sum right, according
to rule, it comes out with the most beautiful
accuracy to the identical result called&or, no
matter how complicated or roundabout NAV
have been the way to the quotient.o
Tommy was set to learn the MULTIPLICATION
table before he had learned to read. Ii was
part of Mr.. Signets system to ground his
boys as seon as possible in the knowledge of
that great sheet-anchor Of our commercial
ediiice, as the schoolmaster was wont TO
phrase it. somewhat after the fashion of Sir
Boyle sRoche, who smeit rat, who saw it
floating in the air, and who would nip it in
the bud ~ - "A $50 $50, q
When Tommy was called up to recte the
table, he baked at The first pull.
Twice one" said the teacher, promptiDgly.
Not word from Tommy. l86s3a3
SLOW much ar, twice enc, Thomas?"
''Don't know" said Tommy. il ~
"Twice one are two" said Mr.. Signet. !.
"Be they?" said Tommy. "a y.-
ayes. Repeat.n !E EaHE8k -
slow dye know they be?" was the next
allow do know, said the astonished teach
er;"l learned that when i was hitler than
You are, Thomas" .sae rre8 H q
"Who told yep ..lsa 51fr
"Eh? Why, my teacher tod me, answered
MIR. Signet, a little COMPOUNDED by the some
What novel course the conversation was TAX
ing
How'd he know p" s.-s smass 81
"Why, what's this? what do yon mean,
Thomas9 Every body knows that twice one
are two" e4..,a
Il don't, though" persisted the dreadful
boy.
1t is written here in the arithmetic, said
Mr.. Signet, taking up a copy ofIOmy's Ge-
ography in his confusion at this remarkable
mathematical hitch.
Perhaps the 'rithemetic lies, said Tommy,
demurey. 49,
That was apuzzler However, by dint OF
producing two apples, and with them Illus
tIating. Mr.. Si2net was enabled at last 10
| demonstrate to this cautious truth-seeker The
fact hat twice one were two. 1t was only by
long course OF demonstration, backed by
ocular Illustration, that Tommy was at last
indicted into knowledge OF the great table
and such was the boys constant aversion to
arithmetic. that he soon came to rank very
low in the esteem OF the old schoolmaster,
who Viewed his astonishing stupidity with a
sort OF plying contempt. Tommy got into
disgrace by slow and sure degrees. He would
whisper In study-hours, eat beech-nuts and
apples, stick mp his hair in imitation of Mr..
Signet, and make the scholars laugh and mis-.
behave in innumerable WAYS, taking his
Ho2Slngs in the most pnilosophic manner. as
part oil the sorrows OF life merely. He
never seemed to associate the idea OF reform
alton with the thwackings he got from
Schoolmaster Signets ruler.
Hes. the most hardened little wretch y
declared Miss Cottle, when Tommy came un-
der discussion i'm feminine circles, as he often
did. Nothing touches him. His father has
much to answer Tor, Mrs. Porter. Has spared
the rod till he's spoiled the child, and that's
Scripture Ii that boy wasn't born to be
hung, I'd like TO know why!" -
But when Tommy was about ten years
Old, his fortunes took a sudden turn for the
better. Old Mr.. Signet died, universally la
mented, and George Collier, Squire Golfers
son, was made schoolmaster. George had
just graduated at Yale, and had rather more
advanced views on educational matters than
his predecessor. He introduced the practice
OF having determinations and compositions in
school on Saturday forenoons, as wind up
for the week. Poor as Tommy was in arith-
metic, he came out in this new field OF endea-
vor In fine style, and soon ranked high in the
elegant art of speaking pieces"
Miss Cottle had now discovered Tommy's
bent, and was able to trace his disgraceful ca
reer in the future with degree of precision.
d
theatre" said she, ''and be low actor-mark
my words! What them actors are, and what
they come to, everybody knows"
Meantime Tommy was becoming more and
more popular among his mates Saving moth
ing OF his generous nature, which got him IN
to frequent scrapes; saying nothing of his ca
pability OF being cheated out of Marbles
tops. anything, in short, that he possessed
another PROOF of his melancholy unfitness
. ef,ra f.od N ol, In 10. c.
urday forenoon that the boy looked upon him
with the greatest admiration. if.'se'a'
II was the new schoolmaster's practice to
allow the boys to declaim pieces of their own
choosing, they informing him only ofthe titles
thereof, that he might make out a written
programme, which was posted on the school
house door each Friday afternoon, and was
consulted with deep interest by such of the
village folks as in the habit of attending these
weekly exhibitions" Young Golfers plan
did not include any preliminary drilling OF
the boys; his comments on their, orat ,rical
lacks were made in open school atthe close OF
the exercises. s5r18 Y .s.E-5ss tl.4ee5E "a
what do you think, Miss C,ttle p exclaim-
ed Mrs. Porter. / EN- only surprised that the
trustees allow such goings-on in our school
house every week. 1 shall never go to see
their scandalous performances, whoever else
may" " -W4tFstf3ga sc&aF1 -
strong liking for these displays of juvenile
oratory and histrionics, and scarcely missed
Saturday at the school-house She had Just
come down from that seat of learning, where
she had been perusiDg the programme Tor the
morrow, greatly pleased at seeing her boys
hume the first on the list OF speakers, though
the little chap had no more of the oratory in
him than gate post. ~ 5ssse.
swell, that's as you like, Miss Cottle, of
course" she pursued. Il don't see no harm
into it. My boy is agoin' to speak piece OF
poytry by Martin Parker Tucker, and But
what do you think, Tommy Joy is agoin' to
speak" .ss asa 30 81, sss's..5
''Well-what " snapped Miss Cottle, curl
osity conquering contempt -+
"A sermonw CALCULATED Mrs. Porter. sDid
you euer?" alaasla ,saaisl4F3 ssassaE
SWELL I'm sure! He speak sermon, in
deed That's like that boys brazen impu-
dence.. Why, Mrs. Porter, if you'll believe me,
Mary Jane Peck told me she asked that boy,
only last Sunday, as he walked home beside
ner after church, how he liked the sermon
and he said-ohi the awfulest languagep
Miss Cottle paused in horror of the mere
remembrance. THEEH #EE
Why, what did he say?" queried Mrs. Por-
fer. ..- -
He said it was regular snorterpn Miss
Cottle was pale with excitement "He speak
a sermonp esaa S gas So - 7
However, Mrs. Porter so stimulated the
spinster's curiosity before leaving her, that she
was induced to agree that, for this once, "it'll
be the best thing ever knew of him. Mercy
Knows I'd be rejoiced to see signs OF reform in
him" -
rfue little sckoh-room WAS croudad With