Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1867-05-18

i'SHt, onu NC Wao hiI Etauy IoE lne QOg, TOO,
and knocked him endways with rock when
he came to tear him.
1t was very strange--nothing like it ever
happened in those mild little books With
marbled backs, and with pictures in them Of
men with swallow-tailed coats and bell
crowned hats, and pantaloons that are short
in the legs, and women with the waists of
their dresses under their arms, aud no hoops
on. Nothing like it in any Of the Sunday
school books Once he stole the teachers
penkuife, and when be was afraid it would
be found out, and he would get whipped, be
slipped it into George Wilson's cap--poor
widow Wilson's son, the moral boy, the good
little boy of the village, who always obeyed
his mother, and never told an uutruth, and
was fond Of bis lessons. and infatuated with
Sunday school. And when the knife dropped
from the cap and poor George hung bis head
and bushed, as if in conscious guilt, and
the grieved teacher charged the theft upon
him, and was Just in the very act of brip ginr
the switch down upon his trembling sloul-
ders, white. haired improbable justice of
the peace did not suddenly appear IN their
midst and strike an attitude and say, Spare
this noble boy-there stands the covering
culprt | was RAISING the school door at r..
cess, and, unseen myself, saw the thsi,
committed And then jim didn't get " ha-
led, and the venerable justice didn' t cad he
fearful school a homily, and take George by
the hand and say sach boy deserved 10 be
exalted, and then tell him to come and make
his home with him, and sweep out the Office,
aad make fires, and run errands, and chop
wood, and study law, and help his wife to DO
household labors, and have all the balarle
Of the time to play.
No, it would have happened that way in
tie books, br: it didn't happen tha. way to
jim No me'dliny Of an old claim Of ins.
tice d'orlcl III 10 male trJu5.c, .nl - me
model boy. George, ct thrAshed, a"I jan
was glad of it. Because, you know, jim ia
ted moral boys. Jim said he was "lown on
the IN milkslops." Such was the coarse .a,.-
guage of this bad, neglected boy. Bu; ,Ao
sranS"st things t..at ever happeued 10 JIM
was the time when he went boating On Sun
day and didn't get drowned, and that other
time that he got caught out in the storm
when he was fishing on Sunday, and didn't
get struck ~ lightning. Why, you nj .;ht
look, and look. through the Sunday school
books, from now till next Christmas, AID
YOU would never come across anything lko
THIS Oh. no, you woull fad that all the
bad boys who 90 boating on Sunday invan'a,
bly, get drowned, and all the bad boys who
get caught cut in storms, when they are fish
il z on Sunday, invariably get struck by light.
ring. Boats with bad boys in them always
upset on Sunday, and it always storms when
bad boys GO fishing on the Sabbath. How
tLs Jim ever escaped is mystery to me-
This Jim bore charmed life-that must
have been the way of it. Nothing cou.I hurt
him. He even gave the elephant in the me.
nagerie plug Of tobacco, and the elephant
didn't knock the top Of his head of with bis
trunk. He browsed around the cupboard
after essence Of peppermint and didn's make
a mistake and drink aqua for,s
He stole his father gun and went hunt
ing on the Sabbath, and didn't shoot three
or four fingers off. He struck his little sis-
ter on the temple with his fist when he was
angry, and she didn't linger in pain through
long summer days and die with sweet words
Of forgiveness upon her lips that re6oubled
the anguish Of bis breaking heart. No; she
got over it. He ran off and went to sea at
last. and didn't come back and find himsei,
sad and alone in the world, his loved ones
asleep in the quiet church yard, and the wire
e,nbowered home Of his hoyhood tumI'ed
down aud gone to decay. All, no; he came
home drunk as piper, and got into the sta,
tion-bouse the FIRST thing. And he grew IN.
and married, and raised large family, and
Drained them oil with an axe one night, cu4
got wealthy by all manner Of cheating and
rascalty and now he is the iufernalist wic1.
edest scoundrel in bis native village, and is
universally respected, and belongs to the ie-
gislature. So you see there never was bad
James in the Sunday school books thai had
such a streak Of luck as this sinful jim with
the charmed life.