The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1867-03-23


men always do when they are out. of temper
returned to the kitchen. The fire was all
ont, and the room decidedly smoky.
| I'm go down cellar and bring up some
! coal. said he, and he started brisklv down
! the stairs On the second step he put his
! foot through rip in lis dress skirt, stumbled
aud fell to the bottom Of the cellar, smash
/ ing basket Of eggs, and knocking over -
shelf loaded with pans Of milk.
/ Duce take it, exclaimed he, scramb
| ling 10 his feet, and rubbing his head. how
do women manage with these internal long
dresses. ] shall break my neck with this
YETI
The fire made again, Mr. Keith bcthought
| him OF dinner. lie looked at the time piece {:
it was one o clock Almost time for din.
ncr? He had heard his wife say that rice
pudding was easily made, he would have
rice pudding aud boiled potatoes, and broil.
cd steak
He filled a basin with rice, stirred in a
little sugar, dropped in an egg, and set the
| vessel into the oven. The potatoes he wash.
ed in soap suds, that they certainly might he
clean, aud put them into the tea kettle be.
cause they would boil quicker,
The steam was THRILLING in the frying pan
he was proceeding to set the table when the
bell rang. he caught the pan from the fire,
to keep it from burning, and made haste to
the front door. Then lie remembered it
would not be Just the thing to go to the door
I with frying pan in his hand, so he dcpos.
tied it on thcparor sofa. and answered the
ring.
Mrs DR.. Nudge was on the steps, dressed
in her best.
Ies-l-darc say, stammcrcd Keith,
"my wife is absent and am the Bridget"
Mrs. Nudge sailed into the parlor, which
was darkened to exclude the sun, and with.
out stopping to look at her seat, sunk into
the frying pan on the sofa
"Jnpitcr," cried Mr.. Keith. you We
done it now" Mrs. NJ. sprang up, the
grease dripping from her rich silk on the
carept. Her face grew dark. She was
tempted to control herself: bowed haughtiIy
and left the house.
Keith returned to the kitchen little crest
fallen, for Mrs. Nudge was II lady before
whom he desired TO appear particularly well,
There was a tremendous cracking in the
oven. He thought of his pudding, and
looked in. The burnt rice had hoped all
over the oven the basin had melted apart,
and the pudding was not done. He smut
the door upon the ruins in disgust, and look
ed after his potatoes only to find them boiled
to perfect Jelly, And just as he made the
discovery there was q st'afy peal at the door.
bell. "Creation there that aDonlniable
bell again. wish folks would stay at home
I'll lock all the doors, and cut all the bell
wires after to. day
At the door he found Mr.. and Ms. Fidgct
and tileir children.
"My deer Mr.. Keith! how do you do q
cried Mrs. Eidget g We were in town and
thought We d just step III to dinner. Where
is Mrs. Keith?''
She's gone away" said Keith, ruefully,
wondering what he should feed them on !:
! "walk in, do; lam the housekeeper to. day"
Yes. so should judge. But Of course
you make splendid one. | remember you
used to be frequently telling Mrs. Keith and
myself how very easy housekeeping must be.
II must be mere play to yGg, Don't put
Yourself out, beg
| Put myself out, indeed - cried Keith
retreating to the kitchen. Good gracious !
what shal! Do? I'd give hundred dol.
lars if Mary was only here, Where shall |
hcgin?'
| lie drew out the table and set it without
any cloth then took off the plates and put
/ on eloth-the very one he had wiped the
! dishes on. The task completed he put on
some more potatoes, and some ilQrc steak ;
burned the steak to cinder; took off his
potatocs when he did his meat, and put
them all upon 'ilo table, There was loaf of
bakers bread in the cupboard; ho paradcd
that, and called his guests to dinner.
4 \ quizzical smile spread over Mrs. Fidg'
cts face at the sight Of the repaSt. Keith
was in a cold perspirat'on.
Ma, my plate all greasy, and SOS my
knife | cant eat on dirty dishes" cried
little Johnny Fidect.
And my fork is wet all over with water
that's dropping Of the table cloth; and my
ta,ar ain t halfbicl,' cried little Sue Fidgct.
! \ slight noise in the kitchen drew tho at.
ten:ion of Mr.. Keith
" Jupiter!' cried he, ''if Mrs. OFlath
crty s dog aiu'i making off with my steak "
lie ju mped from the table and started in
hot pursuit. The dog made the best of it:
keith's unaccustomed attire was sad draw
back, and he made but little Roadway.
xiii him. he yelled TO the crowd that
Joined in the pursuit. III give fifteen dol
lars for his bide.
Mrs. O'Flathcrty herself appeared on thu
scene, With a skillet of hot water
Tech him flyer dare!H ahe cried, "Il
break the bones of every mothers sou o
wees. Stand from foruinst or ven rue thu
day"
Keith took a stop forward stepped on h
skirt and pitched head first in wine cellar
where half dozen men were playing cards
'The devil in rettcoats," exclaimed on
gamester, and the place was emptied qulcke
than wink.
The police picked up Mr.. Keith consider
ably bruised, md carried MIN home. Hi
company had taken their departure, an
somebody, not having the fear of the lay