The Manitowoc tribune. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1866-1878, 1867-05-30
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS. .

Cor MIxEI. Some days ago there
was a dancing party given for the benefit
| of the Fenians, st Alliance, and several
| of the ladies present had little babies
whose noisy per,ersity required too much
| attention to allow their ma S to enjoy the
shop" A number of gallant young men
volunteered to guard the infantry. while
| the ladies engaged in the sbreak down.
No. sooner had the mothers left their
chelubs in the hands Of the niischievous
wretches than they stripped the darlings,
and changed their clothes, giving the APP
parel OF one to another. The dance over
the mothers each took as she thought her
own baby, and hurriedly left the scene of
gaieties and started to cheir homes several
miles apart, being far on the way before
the peep o day. On the following
day there was a tremendous row in the
settlement. Mothers discovered that
single night had changed the sex Of their
babies, and then commenced some of the
tallest female pedestrianism. Lying
miles apart, 1t required two days to I'M
mix the little cherubs. and viii require as
many weeks to restore the mothers to
their natural sWeet disposition.
At one of the schools in a certain city
the inspector asked the children if they
could give any text OF scripture which
forbade a man marrying too wives One
OF the childei n sagelyquoted in reply the
text: NO man can serve two masters.
Some time ago planter a short dis
lance from Memphis, gave party to the
young folks in his neigborhood 1t was
a gay time. and in the course of the eve
ming the boys and girls played forfeit
" hile this was going on, it CHANGED that
the of the planter, nice modest fell
low, had to claim a forfeit. but was over
come with difIidence Go ahead John,
said the planter and kiss some of the
girls John hitched from one foot to
the other, blushed and finally blurted out
+! never kissed white girl, father .
The laughter that en5ued may be mag
led.
A lady tramped on dogs tail at Onla-
la, the other day, and the animal bit her
leg The blood did not flow, however
only sawdust flew He did not go deep
enough for blood This is the most use
i'll purpose we have ever heard of false
calf serving.
John Halle, boy of sixteen, has
WdtheN from lfUF iutf1ce 10 SdlitOFBla.s by
the Overland Route, and arrived in San
francisco Halle and hearty
A HARD JOKE.-The latest, grandest
Joke Is that the war department, formal
" made full report to Queen Victoria
government Of all the English and Irish
subjects of her dominions resident In the
United States and claiming British pro-
lection during the late American war
Such subjects are being drafted for the
British service in Ireland ard India, and
the L. s. War Department has ordered
their delivery ID a man twelve hundred
such already have been drafted. The
poor draft sneaks and deserters are hav7
ing hard time Of it-having not friend
on earth nor country.
George Francis Train says our modern
marriage ceremony should read thus
Clergyman-WiH you take this brown
stone, this carriage and span, these dia-
monds for thy welded husband? Yes
Will you take this unpaid milliner's bill
this high waterfall of foreign hair: these
affectation accomplishments, and feeble
constitution for thy welded wife? Yes.
Then, what man has joined together let
the next best man run away with 50 that
the first divorce court may tear them as
under