Rutland weekly herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1859-1877, 1867-06-13

Is alluz agln a man, for trooly honest
man kin alluz find enuff Others to say II
for him. ID, he tries TO prove 1t witch is
very bad, for the honesty witch needs
provln Is NV rather a scaly order. He
Instances his spilin his chances for the
SENT last fall by writin that universal
amnesty letter. Horris, lnthis matter,
Is, | fear, playu ostrich. He hez his
he'd In the sand, and, bein blind hisself,
fancies the balance NV his anatomikle
strukter, wich ought TO be in the back
ground, amt visible to the rest NV man
kind. Or, he is RELY loonatic /
never had any idee that he wanted the
seat in the SENT. He wuz In Congris
wunst, and the terrible laleyoor he made
ther, wood, ef he wuZ conshus Nv 1t,
hev deferred him from seekin that per-
tikeler place agin. Then, If he wuz
RELY eOmpOs meHiis, he wood hev knowd,
or ought TO hev knowd that he bedn't
the ghost NV chance for the place, and
coodn't hev got 1t et he he'd written a
letter urgin the hanging Nv every rebel,
from Jetf'son Davis down to Commodore
| Hollins. 1t looks to me very much like
ez ef Horris wuz playin the old game NV
declinin wat he'd never bin offered him,
| His letter wnZ soundin brass and tink-
lin cymbals,"
"Shel l enter him or not 2" askt the
Secretary.
"ItsIa curis case" said Lucifer, not
mindin him. ale hez bin agin me- by
spasms, and when he hez done things
witch could approve, | hev alluZ, so
g. 10
loonacy, for | am pertikler about putin
my claw onto any man who don't belong
to me. hev clear rite to every one |
git. This last trick Nv hiz stsggers me
Kin it be that the old man wuz, all
along, OppOsin wreng and SIGH, not from
any deep seated dislike to the article,
but becoz opposin things waz his best
holt? Kin it be that hevin bin in the
minority all his life, and found therein
profit becoz 1t so happened that the mi
nority wuz rite, that he is now anXshus
to git into that fix agin? Does HOrris
spose that, hevin the strength NV
successful career to back him, and
hevin hundred thousand, more or less,
who are ia the habit Nv readin him,
the people will fOller him thro the
stinkin slums Nv error jest e. lively
ez they did over the breezy hills Nv
trooth Hez his vanity got the better
Nv hisn disCretio st last ? Hex the hang
ers.on witch alluz puff incense into the
face NV success, bin burnin hasheesh
afore him, and hez it intossiCatid him
Is he, at his advanced age, in imitashen
NV Sut LovDgood's daddy, goin to play
boss, forgittin the hornets nest into
witch his great eXemplar plunged 2"
"Shel | put him down or not 2, askt
the secretary agin, ruther impashently.
"No?" replied LuCifer, DRAWN hisself
up decisively, OFF he splits up the Alb
lishnists we shell be so deep in his debt
that he willIkeserve to git clear Nv US.
Ez it is, he hez done enutf to entlte him
to our gratitood. He hez restored jeff
son Davis to me he hez even enlarged
his field Nv usefulnis. He is demon
stratin the theory that there amt no
SIGH thing ez treason, and eZ matter Nv
course, that there amt bin no crime COM
mitted by my friend Davis friends. Ez
| Horris is establishin the fact that the
war agin my friends in the South wuz
| uDjustifiable, shouldn't be surprised eff
| the next thing he does, in order that
| justis may be done, will be to insist that
their niggers be returned to EN-. After
all, | speckt that's wat he's drivin at.
Now that slavery's abOlisht, bleeve he'd
like TO hev it restored, that he may hev
suthin to do. His okkepashen's gone.
He's short Nv q subjck now. His pen
hez bin so used to writin slavery
slavery! slavery that he's RELY at
sea- He wants the old sin set up for
him to batter at agin-he wants Love
Joy shot over agin, and bleedin Kansas
to be repeetid. Watts d Professional Re-
former, eE Their amt nOthin to reform ?
Watts corn doctor in country whel
they wear big boots? No! let him go
He's shoor Nv punishment enuff anyhow
He's Universalist, a doctrin the mis-.
take Nv witch he'll diskiver some day
but he's very likely to realize his lice Nv
punishment on earth, for Wendell Phil
lips is after him, and wat wuss, kin he
suffer Set this last act Nv hisn down
ez honesty streakt with loOnacy OF
ruther, the loonacy bein the biggest, e.
loonaCy streaked with honesty, and leave
him out. Go on with the reports
Where's Davis now? and partikelerly
where's Johnson Eff he does anythir
agn me he does it thro mistake. KeeI
track Nv johnson, don't let"
At this pint wuz aroused by some
body shakin me. 1t wuz BascOm. i
wuz s O'Clock, and ez l had not bin over
for my mornin bitters, in witch dooty
am very regler, the good man he'd gone
out in search Nv me. How pleasant til
: to hev somebody to care for 700, even e
ther solisitood springs from ten cen
motive.
PETROLEUM V. Massey, P. NJ.
(Which is Postmaster) and Professor in
the Ham and Japheth Free Academy
for the development Nv the intellek w
, all races irrespective Nv color.