Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1867-01-03
Anaruruns department.
DANIEL O,CONNELL AND THE sCOLD.

lIuu du WIZ WeIe casually Will
His talent for vrtuperative language was perceived
matchless as scold. However, there was at that
time in Dublin certain woman Biddy Moriarty,
who had huckster sstal on one of the quays, near
ly opposite the Four Courts She was virago Of
the first order, very able with her tongue. From
one end Of Dublin TO the other she was notorious
for the powers of abuse and even in the provinces
Mrs. Moriarity' language had passed into curren-
cy: >,
The dictionary of Dublin slang had been consid-
erably enlarged by her, and her voubeness had al
most become proverbial. Some Of O'Connell s
friends, however, thought he could beat her in the
use of her own weapons Of this, however, he had
some doubt himself when he had listened once or
twice to some minor specimens of her bi[ingsgate.
1t was mooted once whether the young Kerry barris-
ter could encounter her, and some one of the COM
pany Tin O Connel presence) rather ridiculed the
idea of his being able to meet the famous Madam
Morarty O'ConneI never liked the idea of being
put down. and confessed his readiness to encounter
her, and even backed himself for the match. Bets
were offered and taken and it was decided that
the matter should come off at once
The party adjourned to the huckater' stand, and
there was the owner herself experimenting the
sale of her small wares.
OConnell was very confident of success. He
had laid very ingenious plan for overcoming her,
and with all the anxiety Of an ardent experimental
ist waited to put it in practice. At this time o.
Connel's own party and the loungers about the
place formed an audience quite sufficient to rouse
Mrs Moriarty, on public provocation, to a due ex-
hibition of her powers O'Connell commenced
the attack by saying:
,, ,'What's the price of this walking stick, Mrs,
What s-your-name?"
"Moriarty, sir, is my name, and good one it is
too, and what have ye. to say agn it? And one
and sixpence is the price Of the stick. Troth, it's
cheap as dirt so it is"
Zone and sixpence for such walking stick
Whew! Why, you are no better than an imposter,
to ask one and sixpence for what only cost two
pence"
'"Two pence, your grandmother" replied Mrs.
Biddy. ''Do you mean to say that it's cheating
the people lam Imposter, indeed"
"Ay, imposter; and it's that call you to your
teeth, " replied O'Connel.
"Come, cut your stick, you cantankerous jacka-
''Keep civil tongue in your head, you old dag
onal !" replied o. Connell, calmly.
t, sR sss ySsf % h ssTS&:Ss T sp'ss naRs Rs
you 20 quicker than you came.
Don't be in passion, my old radius. Anger
will only wrinkle your beauty"
''By hokey, if you say another word OF lmpu-
dence III tan your disty hide, you beastly common
scrub; and sorry I'll be to soil my fist with your
carcass"
"Whey, boys! what passion old Biddy's in !;
I protest, as I am gentleman"
tJintleman jntleman The like Of you jintle-
mani Wisha, by gor, that bangs Banagherr.,-
Why, rou potato-faced pippin-sneezer, where did
Madagascar monkey like you pick up enough OF Of
common Christian decency to hide your brogue?'
''Easy, now" cried O'ConneI, with impertuba-
BILE good humor, "dont choke yourself with fine
language, you old whiskey drinking parallelogram.
whats that you call me, you dirty, murther-
ing vilan?' roared Mrs Moriarty, stung into fury
7Icall you," answered OConnell, "a parallelo-
gram, and Dublin judge or jury would say it was
no libel to call you so.
"Oh, tare and GUNS Oh, holy Biddy! that an
honest woman like me should be called parry belly
grumus you rascally gallows-bird- you cowardly
sneaking, plate-licking blag-gard!" :,
"Oh, not you, indeed u retorted o. Connel.-
"Why, suppose you'll deny that you keep hy-
pothenuse in your houseY
'It's lie for you, you bloody robber I never
had such thing in my house, you bloody old thief!
''Why, all your neighbors know very well that
you not only keep hypothenuse but that you
have two diameters locked up in your garret, and
that you 20 to walk with them every Sunday, you
heartess old heptagon."
"Oh hear that, We saints in glory! Oh that's
bad language for fellow who wants to pass himself
off for jintleman May the devil fly away with
you, you micher from Munster, and bake celery
sauce from your rotten limbs.
'sAh you can't deny the charge, you miserable
submultiple of a duplicate fraction.
$50 rinse your mouth in the Llfy, you nasty
tickle pitcher After all the bad words you speak,
it ought to be flthier than your face, you dirty
chicken of Belzebub
''Rinse your mouth, you wicked old poygon.-
To the deuce pitch you, you clustering intersec-
ton of sinking superhuities
"You saucy tinker's apprentice, if you don't
cease your jaw, H."
But here she gasped for breath, unable to hawk
up any more words, for the last volley OF OCon-
nell had nearly knocked the wind out Of her.
whilst have tongue III abuse you, you most
nimtable periphery Look at her, boys, boys.
there she stands-a convicted perpendicular in
petticoat! There's contamination in her crcumter-
ence, and she trembes with guilt down to the ex-
tremity of her corollaries. All! you're found out,
you rectilineal antecedent and equangular old hag
IT'S YOU the devil will fly away with, you porter
swiping similitude of dissection of a vortex"
Overwhelmed with this torrent of language, Mrs
Moriarty was silenced. Catching up sauce-p -pan
she was aiming at O Connelps head when he very
prudenty made timely retreat.
" You have won the wager, O'Connell, cried,
the men who proposed the contest. Here's your
bet "