Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1867-02-27
Dun1prous 4eabil1g,
psf Maloney,s Cat,

Pat Maloney's Cat.
Pat Maloney, better known by the
name OF Father Pat, on returning from
work one evening, wasmet at the gate oy
Riddy his better half, in high state OF
excitement.
aPat," says she, "there's strange cat
in the cabin"
s.Cast her out, thin; don't be botherln'
me about the haste"
Faix, an I've been strivin' to do that
for the matter of tin minits past, but she
is beyant my rache, behind the big rid
chist in the corner. Will ycz be after
helpin me drive her ont Pat 2"
ITO be sure / will; bad luck to the
eonsate she has for me house. Show her
to me, Biddy, till tache her the respect
that's due to man in his own house-to
be takin' possession without as much az
be yer lave-tha tllafe o the world!.'
Now, Pat had specisl antipa'hy to
cats, and never let pass an opportunity
to kill one. This he resolved to do Ill
the present case, and instantly formed
plan for the purpose. Perceivns but
one way of egress for the animal, nc says
to Biady:
:..lIavc yez vcr malc-b>s III The house,
me darint.I :"
"Divil IL one is there, Pat. Ye took
it to the mill wild yez, to bring home
chips, this mornin''
Faix, AN | did, and there it is yet
thin. And have ye nothin u. all, in the
house. that will tic up Ike bas, B.ddy 2"
"Tro,h an | have. Pat; there's me
Sunday pe,ticoa,-ye can draw the strings
close at til. ,op. al sure it will be better
for not letliu' the cat lawn yez."
Biddy, darlnt, ye'rc jewel just be
aft + bringing it to me at wan>t."
D:dly brought the garment, aud sarr
enough, it made :, good su 'stitn;e for Il
bag. Pst 'leclared at glance that it WAS
"ii;igen'.' So, holding it close against
tn. edge of the chest, he took / look be-
hiad, aid saw a.pair of eyes slsnng a
him.
AN its there yc are, ye divil? b.
out o tha., now bad lnck to y.z, ye thav'
in vagabone Be dad, an ye wont leave
q; all with perlite axin-ycrse!f will bate
the pigs intirely. Bddy, have yez an,
hot water ?"
"Sure. rve the ..ll of tay-kittlc all
bilin', Pat"
BE ather castin' the matter of q
quart, thin behind the chist, and we'll see
how the baste minds the like o that. ("
"Howld close, thi,-here goes the
sseamin' hot water"
SO saying, dash went the water, and
out came the animal into Pats trap.
..Arrah, be the howly poker, have
i'm now, Biidy," said Pat. Is it nine
lives ye hev, ye haste? We'll, now, be
akin me pardon for all the thavin' we've
bin dom in me house, or it's the nine lives
will not save We. BiGdy, seize hoult o
the poker, and whilst | shoulder the bag
just whack the daylights out of the hay
then divil intirely."
Pat threw the bundle over his shoul.
der, and Biddy struck about three blows
to the tune of St. Patrick's day in the
morning. when she suddenly stopped.
What smills so quar-, Pat! Sure.
it's taken me BIRTH away wild the power
of it. o murther. Pat, it's the divil y!e
have in the sack !"
"Bate him, ,hin-bate the horns off,
"I'm faintin'," said Biddy;" cast him
of'ye, Pa"
"Och, murther, murther! Biddy Ma.
loney, what hev yc done? 1e've went
and mistaken horrible polecat for q
hayrumIcss tame cat p
"Pat for the love O. God, if ye're con.
vanient to the door, unclose it, for I'm
perisht intirely. o Biddy Maloney, that
iver you sho i'd lave ould Ireland, to be
smothered az murthsred in this way!"
"Faix, the little villain bates the divil
himself; he's ruined me house, and kilt
Biddy, an put me out o consate wild ME
own self. o, the murthcrin baste!"
BY the dint of washing and securing,
and the burial of Biddy's best petticoat
under the ground for a space of time,
things were at length set to rights again.
But not little rccrimination took place
between them on the occasion, and nei.
ther ever forgot the expulsion from the
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