The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1867-08-08
NO. 20.

81 suppose, of course, you don't feel
sleepy at all 2"
NO" said Mary, looking from the
window at lovely moon that was just
rising, ''No, not very"
ell, said Smith "don't come, if
1 you don't want to, but I can't sit up any
longer, and have an idea l shall get to-
sleep"
| So Mary went to bed with her bearded
baby.
A week had elapsed, Smith was in good
health and spirits. He could smoke
The world wasn't charnel house, after
all. Mary was fiat on her back with
nervous headache.
''Sick 2" asked Smith.
Shocking pain in my temples" said
Mary
"What pity ?" answered Smith, par,
/ ing his nails at the window, without
turning his head. "It's going to be such
a lovely day-quite like spring. Have
you the least idea where my gray pants
are 2"
NO" said Mary, family, feeling for
the pillows, II think in the closet.1
"So-strange," said Smith, "about
those gray pants don't think they've
worn very well-do you? And do you
know, Mary, about the milk bill, whether
it is right or not? And, by the way, did
my shoes come home last night and has.
that man been to fix the front door 2''
"My Head aches so bad" said Mary,
"that | can't remember anything. Biddy
will tell you"
"Well, I'm sorry for you," said Smith,
tying his cravat at the glass The very
best thing for you is to keep quiet, and
In take myself out the way. Sleep is
the thing for you" So Smith put on his
heaviest pair of boots, and went all over
the house, and let the door bang, and whis-
tied the "Stars and Stripes" and ate his
breakfast, and then came up to her to dis
cuss the respective claims of pork and beef
and chicken for that days dinner, clos
ing by another recommendation to keep
quiet and not bother herself about any
! thing.
''No better p asked Smith, reproach.
fnlly, at six o'clock that evening 0no
better! | thought you'd be well, GER
tainly, this time, after days quiet
Quiet2 She had had the whole kitchen
retinue after her all day, asking more
questions than there are in the assembly's
catechism aud the front door bell ring
ing as if by order of the fire department
bat she had said nothing at all about that
If she had, Smith would have replied with
that lordly wave of his hand with which
men dispose of such matters s'You
shouldn't allow such trifes to trouble
you"
"No better, then ?" Smith inquired, as
| if in gratitude to him he rally deserved a.
modification of her former reply-"no.
better? Well, sleep, after all, is the best
thing and, as | cant do anything for
you, | think it is such lovely night that
l will stroll out awhile. There, there
patting the end of the blanket "go to.
sleep now" And close upon his retiring
heels she heard the thundering bang of
the front door
Alter divers and many comparisons be-
| tween male and female headaches, and
the seeming incongruity in the male mind
OF the same course of treatment for both.
Mrs. Smith fell asleep, to be woke about
twelve by Smith, who tbumped up stairs
IN his boots, made a raid after the cork
screw in the closet, and paticular tumb-
ler OF a particular shape, he wanted in
connection with it I; and advised her again
as to the efficiency of sleep, in cases of
female headache then filled the house
with the nauseating fumes of tobacco, at
an hour when it was impossible to air it.
Then-Smith went to bed, and slept the
sleep of the just, with not glimmeriug
of an idea that he was not the unselfshes
and lovingest of husbands Indeed, had
his wife questioned it, he would have
I pointed her to that column in the daily
papers where accounts are given of hus-
bands who make it practice to crack
their wives skulls once week and plac-
ing his arms akimbo with a stern look,
would have asked her with his nose close
/ to her face
"What if she had such husband as
that ?"