Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1867-09-11

me, and said she was afraid l had told lie
and l am afraid had SO then she asked
me if l knew where liars went to, and l said
yes that they went to New York and wrote
Tor the newspapers she said no, they went
to the bad place where there was nothin
but a lake Of fire and brimstun', and she
asked me if l would like to go there, and
said no for L didn't think there'd be much
skatin and slidin' on that lake, and the
boys couldn't snow ball each other on shore,
and she said it was more than that, just as
| though that wasn't bad enough, for don t
think they play base ball, nuther then she
asked me if wouldn't like to be an angel
and have harp and | said no I'd rather
be a stage driver and have big drum, for L
couldn't play on t'other thing. so should mt
like to be an angel, for their wings must be
IN the way when they go swimmin and play
tag and leap frog and, besides, it must be
hard to fly when one amt used to 1t. But
it would be jolly to be a stage driver, and
have long whip, and touch up the leaders
and say g'lang there, what are ye doin' on
| should like that much better'n flying, and
1 then mother said there was dreadful stage
of sin, and brother Bob hollered and said
that he guessed | was on it, and then she
whipped us and sent to bed without any
supper. But | didn't care about supper, for
they hadn't nothing but bread and butter
for tea, and Bob and got up and he lifted
me IN at the pantry window, and we got a
mince pie and a whole hat fullof doughnuts,
and they thought it was the cook that stole
en-, and sent her away the next day, and
Bob said he was glad of it, for she didn t
make good pies, and the doug hnuts WASH I
| fried enough, and sometimes | do swear, for
| said by gollv, the other day, and sister
heard me. and she told mother, and mother
said | was bad boy and would bring her
gray hairs to the grave, and she whipped
me, but | don't think it did her gray hairs
any good, and it hurt me. and when | got
up stairs | said gol darn 1t, but l SAID 1t SO
she dldn hear me, and when she asked me
If | didn think | was very wicked, L said
afraid | was and | was very sorry for it -,
and wouldn't do so no more, and then she
said | was a good little boy, and told me
about George Washington, who cut down
the apple tree, and was caught at it, and
said he did it with his little hatchet, Just as
though | hadn't heard all about 1t before,
and didn t always think he big stupid
| for cutting wood when they had a hired man
about the house, and dullIn his little hatchet
and besides it would have been great deal
iollier to let the tree be, SO he could have
stole some apples off in fall | don't care
if he was the father of his country he WASH t
smart, and I'll bet you the boys in our
school would cheat him out of his eye-teeth
swoppin' iacknives, and | could lick him
and hardly try, and | don't think he was
very healthy either, for | never saw good
little boy that WASH [ always sick and had
the mumps and measles. and scarlet fever,
and wasn't coughin' all the while, and
hadn to take caster oil, and tar-water, and
couldn't eat cherries, and didn' have to
have his head patted till all the hair was
rubbed off by everybody that come to his
/ nd Io b,, old Ia. nj
who died to save sinners, and what he had
been studyin at school, and how far he had
got, and lots of other conundrums. and have
to say his catcchism, no | should not like to
1 be good little boy d Just as lief be an
angel and be done with it, but don I think
ever shall be good little boy. and other
( people don I think so too. for | wasn't never
called good little boy but once, and that
was when Uncle John asked me where
stood in my class, and | told him | was next
to the head. and he said that was right. and
! he gave me a quarter. and then he asked me
how many boys there was in the class, and
| said there WAS only two myself and little
girl. and then he wanted me to give hlm up
the quarter and wouldn I and ne ran after
me and stumbled over chair, and broke
his cane, and hurt himself. and he's been
lame ever since and m glad Of il, for he
isn't my father, and hasn't any right To lick
me- for get enough of that ut home. and
the quarter wasn't good one either.
don't like Uncle John, and guess be knows
it. for he saws | amt Ike any of the family.
and he expects I'll 20 To sea and be pirate
instead OF "a respectable member of society.
and | shouldn' t wonder for | d rather he a
pirate than a soap-hoiler like him. and |
don't care if he Is rich, 1t l. a nasty husI-
ness and shan't have to be a pirate either,
for one can make lots ofmonev without that,
and they are always talking to me about be
ing rich and respectable, and goin 10 Con
sress and being President, and all that sort
of thing, but don't want tn be the Presi-
dent there's Lincoln, he was President,
and guess he's sorry for it now, and there's
Andy johnson, guess he don like it much
either. and feller doesn't have to be re-
spectacle to be Congressman, there S John
Morrisscv, he's made money, and he's gone
to Congress- and he has nice curly hair,
and fine clothes, and he don't do any work
either
shouldn't like to be IA fighter like he is,
for | shouldn' t like to have my nose smashed
rs his is for it looks just like my mother 5
big squash did after the COW bit chunk out
of it, but | should like to have nice curly
hair. nice clothes and lots Of money and
cane, and have people look at me when L
walk down the street, and say that s him,
and don't care who knows it, for don't
want to be a soap-boiler like Uncle John,
nor IA tanner like Uncle Hiram, and all the
good people | know of are soap-boilers or
tanners, except Mr.. Stebbins, and he 5
school teacher, and that s worse than either,
for he has to board round amongst the neigh
bors, and they never put apple sass on the
table when he's at the house heard Mrs.
Sprggins tell Aunt Polly SO ; they wait till
he's gone out to spellin' school or to see the
minister's wife and talk about rhumatlz and
red flannel and hot poultices for sore chests.
and after he's gone they bring out the nice
things and eat 'em by themselves, with lots
of pickles. He don't get anything but
bread with punkin butter and stale dough-
nuts that are left over from Saturday weeks
bakin' oh, [ know these things are done
but there's Bob callin' me and we are going
bird s-nestin', for | know where there's
weller birds nest chuck full Of eggs mother
saws it's cruel and the birds don like it,
and that | wouldn't like to have my eggs
stole if | was a bird and | don't think L
should, but | amt bird, you know, and
that makes difference, and if you want to
print this you can, for next to being a stage
driver and pirate I'd like to be on editor,
for YOU fellers don't have to tell the truth,
and YOU can 20 to the circus without payin'.
JOHN Paul.
From the Toledo Blade.