Clarksville weekly chronicle. [volume] (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1865-1867, 1866-09-28

! found shell upon the leafy void.
Its lips were soft, its dress was blue and cold:
But ere saw thee all its dies were enid.
Ny heart bring thee from the inner shrine /:
breathe but one hope around il, II will shine.
And wear hue .unchangingly divine,
A drop Of amber fell upon the bee,
And thus preserved IL from corruption free
30 would live in love that comes from thee.
Why isn't boy like pretty bonnet7-
Because one becomes q woman, the other
don't. -......
Girls are like peaches, the nearer they aro
ripe, the more they blush.
The farewell of most wives to their hus.
bands these expensive times, is 'buy, buy"
What's the latest and sweetest thing In
bonnetsf The ladies' faces to be sure.
Why is love Ike ducks FOOT Because
it often lies hidden in the breast. sy
Hartley Coleridge once being asked which
OF Wordsworth's productions he considered
the prettiest, very promptly replied, ''his
daughter Dora" J .oa
woman win tolerate tots ,co smoke In n
man she likes, and even say she likes it; aud
yet curiously enough, how she dislikes tin
q man she dislikes. f.egg .aI
Young Stppies, when asked what he
thought of the present style Of ladies' hoops,
replied that he liked them very much, ''as
far a. he could see" l1s 'Ea
Why is a despairing womsn wiser In her
frenzy than despairing mani Because he
tears bis own hair and she tears her hus-
bands. l. ta-3-rtitf
"Do you like novelsr' asked Miss Fltecr.
aid of her backwoods lover. ~ can't say"
he replied, 81 never ate any; but I'm death
on possum. "'
SoMEBopY says that the difference between
the two great parties of the country 10 that
one is the johnson, and the other the demi-
Johnson party.
swell, Annie, how did you GET along with
that stupid lover Of yous7 Did you sue
coed in getting rid of him2' "Oh yes, I
gov Aid of him easily enough married
him. ta
An Englishman in India was Mortified at
receiving telegraphic dispatch from Eng
land that his wife had been deliver ed of five
daughters. The message should have said
fne daughter. F'rn 1
Lord Dundreary has expressed himself fa-
vorable to marriage with deceased wife's
sister, on this ground: at Is economical,
because when fellow narries his deceased
wife's sister he has only one mothsr-in-lawy
IF four dogs, with sixteen legs, can catch
twenty nine rabbits, with eighty seven legs,
In forty-four minutes, how many legs must
the same rabbits have to get away nom eight
dogs with thirty-two legs, in seventeen min.
utes and half?
WHAT YOU CAN Dot does not depend
upon me, said the Grecian, 10 prevent being
spoken III Of; It is only In my power that Il
be not done deservedly. We cannot control
the tongues Of others, but q good life enables
US 10 despise calumnies. acsgnaF..
A Frnchman who had been In India,
speaking Of tiger hunts, remarked,
"When 70 Frenchman hunt ze tigare, ah
re sport Is grand, magnifquei bat wen 20 IL
gare hunt ne Frcnchman, out serc Is 70 very
devil to payl" 4. -
A Frenchman, for years loved lady, and
never missed passing his evenings at her
house. She became a widow. al wish you
joy" cried his friend. "you can marry the
woman you have SO long adored T. "Alas"
said the poor Frenchman profoundly deject-
ed, "and II so, where shall spend my even.
ingsT -..i..-t.....
The following jeu d esprit is old, but will
do 10 rcpublish
A rich old man, named 0ould, having
married young girl, thus announced the
fact to friend
You see my dear sir though eighty years old,
A girl Of nineteen, falls In love with old Qouldi
To which the friend replied; rsf1era
A girl of nineteen msy love Could, lis ,fue,
But believe me, dear sir, il Is Gold withot U
A sentimental young lady In Northern
Georgia, indited the following TO some Of her
admirers in the--"liidganient - tif
'Tis hard for youans 10 sleep la camp,
'Tis hard tor youans 20 fight;
lis hard for youans through snow 10 tramp
In snow to sleep at night; ..l
But harder for weans from youans 10 part,
Since youans has stolen weans hart. Oh OBJ
Noore's "Aaeedotes Of the War"
"hello, my Johnny Reb, how do you feel
now since the surrender Z" yt.
every much like lazarus, Yank!"
'IIow's that2" agHoBiaH al .
"Like | was licked by dogs. s-.-
The Montgomery Mail says the recent
rainy season has cansed much destruction to
the cotton crop. All hopes even Of fourth
Of crop are dispelled. In this immediate
section the crop win be almost total fail
ure. The army worm, the boil worm, tho
rust, and the con ntinued rains hsvs destroyed
every hope. Many of odr largest planters
will not gather a sufficient crop TO pay tho
expenses Of cultivation. at pqi'l'1W
CuRB ron CoKss Put the feet for half an
hour two or three successive nights in q
pretty strong solution Of common soda. Tho
alkali dissolves the indurated cuticle, and the
corns fall out spontaneously, leaving a small
cavity which soon fills. The recips Is voueh-
ed for by an exchange, as certain remedy.
Should IL prove 80, II will enritle the author
To the toe-fclt thanks OF many sufferer
A Lady says. some ten years ngo went
TO my closet TO get sponge cake and found
Il covered With those little pests toe rcd ants.
Not knowing what 10 do with H. laid IL
down on an old black walnut iabis close by,
and In less liule thaa Il has taken me 10