The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1866-03-08
How to keep a Hotel.

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We hear ola great many men who "can't
keeps hotel" hutlthe Saturday Press, o., New
York, lays down asset OF rulss showing chow
tokeep = hotel, that viii be recognized by ey-
ierybedy who has travelled in this country, and
which are certainly "no joke" being facts
most proninent-as Burton used to say in
Jem Baggs, when the audience roared with
laughter at the fifth verse of his song o" VI-
kens. "-'ths is not a comic; song" ,,ga,fTgy
~ aFlrst, don't call it ataYern, or;an inn, or
Gall it a HOUSE, and name it after some
great capitalist, big Indian, or Saint Norton
PESO House, aor sWhoop-de. Doodle House, OF
9 st Bob-o-Link House,; that sounds wen and
will take the travellers ear. 81 i,.s s5-.1
Nothing 1850 vulgar as to court bagmen's
and traders custom, as you will seem to do by
naming your establishment Merchants, or
City or COMMERCIAL
These suggest asecond class affair.
BE sure and establish an immense BARRIERS
shop on tie ground floor.
-, 1t causes grateful -cdor of the balm Of
Thousand Flowers and Night Booming Cere-
us to peryade the atmosphere, and effectually
70 subdueS and oyerc0mes the other and less
eaagraeable smells, as for instance cockroaches
and cookery % nash .yto3gae1sg y NV otaa
Ifyou can hire an Irishman cheap enough, |
III
hall with greasy dish water all day long; 1t
conveys an idea of cleanliness to the guests
at night, when few are about, it Ii of little
consequence. 10
] said gnests,'. and here is a point you by no
means shou d neglect. ~ 3 $40
BE careful in speaking Of, your dodgers, in
printed notices and the ike, to use the term
guest. GaifToI lL4uoS baiiso' uaitvoC eli II
Its fefnedand puts them on their good
8 behavior at once..(ef 4fr2sgtgrsfs,
Procure a well-dressed clerk with curly
black hair, if possible, to stand at the desk,
and by all means insist on his wearing dia-
Inonds. zsaaSA 80 asi5ssHissxsssssJ 0E-g
- - Seedy visitors will take no liberties with
"a such q man.. ~ ~ '.-- As,q1l5 - II n
so When traveller comes in he is not to no
ia ttce him Tor the space five minutes at least
1t puts the obligation at once where it belongs
You take him in, not he you. % .e.Ai.1o9
1t is an excellent device to have the num-
bers of your chambers reversed from the old
plan, s.e, let them begin to count from the
roof ~ 80 ,La :, 4: - SO :
Thus when a,guest sees the clerk put mo.
TO- for instance, opposite his name on the reg
y liter, he departs satisfied andis too much ex-
- 'hausted and cowed by the time he discovers
nc its whereabouts TO make any complaint
- ,i"lnstruct your clerk that it is not his bust
ness to know anything about departing trains
and steamboats,. z " " % :,
Also, ifyoaf House happens to be in a coun-i
.ya Wy town, TO add 81 a day invariably to all
-elin9s They viii not think much of your House
S1 otherwise e s2 Pa q as5nagd i.aob nsm
When guest has paid his bill ard is about
sbit TO Depart, let atna clerk ask scheerly-which
way do you CO. Mr. Robinson? Of 99'lgiaa
- !. Some persons are 50 ca lily imposed upon,
az that the extraordinary TACT of highly bediz-
g ened clerks knowing their names Two minutes
~ utter reading hem on the register, tckles
them trenendorsysp !, HOE aa55o 7 9yI9sf p -
nuqsz In regard to- the dining-room, you cannot
III have TOO impudentpan Irisnman as head wal
600 II should be his duty, when guest enters
sgnthe room. no matter how empty it may be, to
o.. take him in convoy and make him walk the
e, 3| entire length Of it before assigning him a
1t not only serves to impress the grandeur of
the apartment upon him, but invariably dis
a Il concerts bashfui men, so that they devour
.s4at their meals very meekiy and make no trouble
= Ladies should be served in the same-way
s2for exactly contrary reasons. q L. .4qa
1t aHords them tne opportunity to display
their clothes, and puts them in good humor
Let the sexes be kept religiously apart while
z feeding, unless In the. case of husband and
vile. ~
Married men travelling alone will suffer 50
much from the dearth of female society, that
next time they will probably bring their wives
1t will scarcely be necessary to make any
suggestions in regard to extra fehargeslin the
as they will naturally occur to the feeblest
D Of landlords III silva atdv
You should always, however, charge for
lire In winter in every room that has conven-
, ienccs for it, and If demonstrated with, reply
tnatlt is 'rrle OF the House, and the guest
u might have had it. ~ - - WV
This phrase you viii find Of immense ser
vice on all OCCASIONS DIE 70
Let all your employees be particular to style
az tne hosei omnibus coach, and gents wife,
Egos These little elegancies cost nothing and
gid the surface Of life immensely. Z -
9H. Procure the largest Chinese gong Won can
Te find, to awaken your guests in the nornina
ls and call them to meals. IS 5sl71i -s'--s'
A1os They will conclude that your House is a
stunning Affair.", 80 -
'A thoroughly than white man. 1E''1iI-
Also on the counter in the Office. keen an
.6G immense hammer-bell sl0gs1q ssl5iIS q -.
la jud cious clerk will produce very hum
bling effect upon a modest guest by striking il
. Violently four or five times when he il. asking
absuId questions"
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