Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1866-12-15
fFrom the Norristown Republican. ]
NIfndfng the Baby.

"B-, l wish you would Keep an eye on
Harry while run over to Uncle Josh's. I'll
be back in FIVE minutes"
The speaker was my highly respected
aunt, and Harry" was, on the authority of
u fair creature of the fitting hoop gender
a "sweet cherub" of FIVE months.
Now, if there is any one thing in this
President-making Union that like, more
than another, it is cross baby-out of my
sight, and hearing, too A good infant
0ikc used to be) that does nothing but
crow and sleep, can tolerate short peri.
od--say four minutes. Rather than take
care of cross youngster from half an
hour up to thirty minutes, would
would run for Congress .ay
Or make love to a red-headed girl, who
played on the accordeon-
Or be an Alderman
Or get goriously -icated-
Or commit any other absurd or mean act
except support A. Us bloody policy, or
vote for Copperhead
Fact
But five minutes was not long to suffer
for ones aunt. And as Harry was lying
in his crib, enjoying Natures sweet resto-
rer, Sleep" it was highly probable that he
would sleep it out on that line, until the
Well, my aunt leaned over the crib and
kissed the small edition of humanity, mur-
muring something about "muzzer's angel,
so it is" and then started for Uncle Josh's.
Yours. &C., emptied himself into an invi-
ting.looking lounge, and with crib, rocker
under one foot, and a novel in one hand,
prepared for the worst. The novel was a
thrilling affair, entitled. "Snoots, the Scien.
tifc Skedaddler; or, the Terrible Tinker of
Tinicum: tale of the next war;" / soon
became interested in the fortunes and mis-
fortunes of Maid Margery, the Sheroine,
whose lover had been fatally killed five
times in the same number of chapters.
had read as far as the 9002th page, LXVW-
KY chap, and 44th line, when the contents
Of the crib began to manifest evident signs
of life.
| became alarmed; consulted my time
indicator, and discovered that my aunt's
five minutes already exceeded five times
that number. ....
pushed the crib. I made it oscilate at
a fearful rate. The infant rocked to and fro
like a storm tossed burk.-though never
saw q storm-tossed bark.
think have read. or been told, or heard
1t from another source, that childs liver
is benefited 10y an occasional trouncing.--
If such he the case, then the human mind
can scarcely conceive of the immense amount
of benefit bestowed upon that important
organ possessed by Harry"
But it didn't produce the desired effect
The more rocked, the more he didn't de-
sist crying. Indeed. his screams became
terrific. Here was an interesting predica
ment for The undersigned. l didn't know
what to do, and would liked to have had
some person to help me do it. know
felt ,leathly pale, and looked fatally sick.
Harry's each succeeding yell averaged a
note higher than its predecessor. Some
thing must be done. timidly bent over and
peered into the crib but. for the life of me,
couldn't discover an object therein that
could possibly be mistaken for Harry-no-
thing but an extensive variety of laces and
frills, and linens, and embroidery, and dimi-
ty, and edgings, and things.
But there was no mistaking that voice.
The owner of it must be hidden in the laces,
etc, aforesaid, and it was just as clear as
beeswax, that he must be taken up. So,
going to the window for the ninth time,
and not seeing speck of his mother, l
again approached the crib for the purpose
''histin" the "little cherub."
carefully manipulated among the laces
and things, fearing | would poke my fingers
in the little dear's eyes, you know. Then |
concluded to take him up, "fixins" and oil !;
so lifted him up tenderly fashioned so
slenderly, crying tremendously, so young
and so cross And the only proof that
had him enclosed were the screams that ac-
companied and issned from the "budget." "
] sat down on The lounge famed myself
with "Snoots," etc, and there proceeded to
institute search for my little cousin.
pulled aside piece of muslin here, piece
of linen there. and piece of don't know
what-you-call-it in another place. last
aha at last l had-oh agony had him
wrong end up-or, if you prefer, the right
end down! Fact
soon transposed him, however, and then
used my utmost exertions to pacify him.
But all in vain.
| carried him across the room ninety-o one
times, and back ninety-one times and up
the room seventy times, and down
seventy nine times-which. if you are vast
at mathematics, you will find amounts to
something between one hundred and thou
sand.
Then laid him back in his crib and ben
eftted his liver few more; then / looked
at my watch. and discovered that my aunt
Hau Decn hcScnt an uOuT anu udli tutu
went to the door too look for said aunt
didn't see "hair nor hide" of her. Then
returned to Harry.
Oh horror and so forth !
Could it be possible that during my alb
sence of few seconds, some iend in human
form (new phrase had entered the room
and. with murder in his eye, and biz
butcher knife in his hand, decspitated Iiar
ry Immediately below the nose No
was deceived. The little angel mad onl
opened wide his mouth preparatory to an
other yell
And such yell
"Wah- ah. .ah a aa-a-ah-ah- a-a-wah !"
When the writer hereof was some thre
feet old, or six years high, remembers beinI
told some five or thirty.6ve times that b
had made enough noise to raise the roof o
the house. But don't believe it ever rails
ed-not raise. don't intend to exaggt
rate now, and say Harry's yell elevated tn
covering or the domicile-because II didn'
But it was afterwards ascertained that
loosened seventeen shingles Fact.
: Again was compelled to lift the litt
dear. Then tried the ''baby talk"on him
] this style, you know:
"Does the itty deary weary's tooseys wo'
] seys hurty- wurty hint Does he want
hunk wunky Of eandy-wandyl Does Harr