The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1866-11-20
ARrEMUs WARD INLONDoN.
He VISITS the British REuseum..-Fh
" 4ns1tl enl9 ON the way and amid IN
CuElOBltles OF the Place. y

70 esA3S Vu dScOuuB OF my nerFlS
stsnm haVin underwent a dreffie shock.
got caught in a brief shine of sun,
ana II utterly upset me. / was walkin
IN Regent street one day last week, en-
joytn your rich black lag and bracing
rains, when all at once the sun bust out
and actooally shone for nearly half an
hour steady. l acted promptly. cali
ed a cab and told the driver to run his
hoss at a fritefnl rate of speed to my
lOdgins, but IL wasn't of no avale. 1
had Orful cramps, my appytite left me,
ana my pulls. went down to 10 degrees
below zero. But by careful nussin 1
shall no doubt recover speedily, If the
present sparkin and eXileratin weather
containers. ui4 .lIr3 N
All of the foregoin is sarcasum.
It's sing lar faCk, but never sot
eyes on your excellent British Moose
um till the otherday. I've sent great
many people there, as also to your gem
tal Tower of London, however. 1t hap
pened thusly: When one OF my excel
lent countryman jest arrived In London
would come and see me and display a
inclination TO cling to me too lengthy,
thus shown respect for me which
feel 1 do not deserve, would suggest a
visit to the Mooseum and Tower. The
Mooseum would ockspy him a day at
least, and the Tower another, Thus
I've derived considerable peace and
comfort from them noble edifisses, and
hope they will long continner to
grace your metropolis. There's my fren
Colonel Larkins, from Wisconsin, who
regret to say understands the Jamaica
question, and wants to talk with me
about it; i sent him to the Tower four
days ago, and he hasn't got through
with it yit. He likes it very much,
and he writes me that he can't never
thank me sufficient for directin him to
IN n NNiN NfNN 7 1T
TO mention it. The Col. says it is fort
nit we live in a intellectooal age which
wouldn't countenance such infamus
things as occurd in this Tower. Pm
aware that it is fashin'ble to compile
ment this age, but amt SO clear that
the Col. is altogether right. This is a
very respectable age, but its pretty easily
riledi and considerin upon how slight
n PROPAGATION we who live in it go to
cuttin each others threats, it may per-
haps be doubted whether our intellecks
is SO much massiver than our ancestors
intellecks was, after all.
allus ride outside with the cabman.
am of humble parentage, but I have
df you will permit me to say sol the
spirit of the eagle, which chaies when.
shut up in four-wheeler, and I feel
much eagler when I'm in the open
air. So on the mornin on which 1
went to the Mooseum ] lit pipe and
calm q cab told the driver to take me
there as quick us his Arabian charger
could go. The driver was under the
Innocence of beer, and narrowly es-
capped runnin over a aged female in the
match trade, whereuponI demonstrated
with him. said, "That poor old wo-
man may be the only mother of a Young
man like you" Then throwing con-
siderable pathos into my voice, 1said,
you have mother?n -'.-..'.
In an T i
called another cab, but said nothing to
this driver about his parents.
The British Mooseum is a magnificent
free show for the people. It is kept
open fer the benefit ofall.
! The humble costymonger who ira
verses tho busy streats with u cart CON
tainin all kinds of vegetables, such us.
spirited jackass-he can go to the Moo
scum and reap benefits therefrom as
well MS the lord of high degree.
And this" said, sis the British
MooseumI These noble walls" [ CON
tinnerd, punching them with my UNI
breller to see ifthe masonry was all
wasn't allowed to finish nv
enthusiastic remarks, for n man with
gold band on his hat said, in a harsh
voice, that must stop pokin the walls.
| told him would do so by ali means.
You see" 1 said, taking hold of the
tassel whiah waved from the mans
belt, and DRAWN him close to me in a
confidential way, "You see, I'm look
ing round this Mooaeum, and if I like
l first visited the stuffed animals, of
which the gorillers Interested me most.
These simple-minded monsters live in
Atriky, and are believed to be human
beins to a slight extent altho' they are
not allowed to vote. In this depart
ment Is one or two superior CRATES. 1
never woulded / were a bird, but I'ye
sometimes wished was giraffe, on
account of the long distance from his
mouth to his stummuck. Hence, if he
loved beer, one mugful would give him
as much enjoyment while goin down
as forty mugfnls would ordinary per-
sons. And he wouldn't get intoxicated,
which Is beastly way of amusin one!
sell, must say. like little beer
now and then, and when the teetotall-
ers inform us as they frekently do, that
It Is vile stuff, and that even the swine
shrink from 1t, say 1t only shows that
the swine is ass who don't know what's
good; but to pour gin and brandy
aoWn ones throat as freely as though
1t were fresh milk, is the most idIefic
way ofgoin to the devil that I know of.
enjoyed myselfvery much looking
It the Egyptian mummys, Greek vases,
&C., but 1t occurd to me there was raw.
Iher too many Roman antiQuitys of n
uncertain date" Now, 1 like the
British Mooseum, as I said afore. but
when see lot of earthen Jugs aud poLs
stuck up on shelves, and all ssof UNI
pertain date," I'm. at a loss to 'zactly
1etermtn whether they are a thousand |
years old or was bought recent. I can
Try like child over Aug one thousand
years of age, especially II it is q Roman
ug; but a Jug of uncertain date doesn't |
1Verwhelm me with emotions, jugs
md pots of uncertain age is doubtless |
'auyable property, but, like the deben-
ureS OF the London, Chatham and Do |
many ofthem.
1 was debarred out of the great read |
n-rOOm. a man told me / must apply |
~ letter for admission, and that 1 must /
Jet somebody to testify that was re-
pectable. I'm a little 'fraid 1 shant
ret In there. Seein a elderly gentleman,
WITH q oenever!ent-lookin face near by,
ventura to ask him If Z would certi1
y that l was respectable. he said he
certainly would not, but he would put
ne IN charge of a policeman, il that |
would do me any good. a thought
truck me. II refer you to Mr.. Punch, y
well, said a man who had listened
0 my application, lyon hare done it
will get this infamous wretch's name
.etore you go to press, so that you can
leuounce him in the present number OIL
1our excellent Journal.
The statute of Apollo Is pretty slick
tatute. a young yeoman seemed |
ieeply impressed with it He viewed
T with silent admiration. At home. in |
ne beautiful rural districks where the
iaisy sweetly blooms, he would be
in horrible manner nj his
1ullocks, and whackin Fem over the
lead with q hayfork; but here. in the
presence of Art, he is changed bein.
told the attendant that If the British