The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1866-04-06

We are well assured that it suits the most
delectable thing in the world to be an exact
ing public's very Honorable servant. There
is the Hon. Gregorious Nudge and
the Honorable Constantine Fudge members Of
the General Assembly from the county of
Grudge, by virtue of a dear peoples pleasure
and considerable electioneering. Does any
one envy Nudge and Fudge their prefix,
their free postage, and their three months at
the Capital Oh! verdant friend of ours,
cpd aspirant for legislative honors, cherish
no longer your fatal hallucination. " Crom.
well, charge thee, fling away ambition.
Take TO your cottage, your friends, your
wife's smiles and bnttered toast, your chill
drens laughter and measling, instead, as you
would be virtuous and happy 1t is true
Nudge and Fudge enjoy some rare distinctions
denied to the humber crowd below them.
They get, their names repeatedly into the
papers, and have the pressure of seeing
everything pertaining to themselves and . re-
mote ancestry paraded before the public for
months before the election. The sovereign
voters are Informed as proof of the unfttnes s
Of Fudge that there is extant letter from
the great grandfather Of the present Fudge,
wherein he persistently spelled Fudge
with little +. 1t is, ALSO darkly limited that
the parental ancestor Of Nudge four genera
:ons removed, was a jolly old cub and died
Of gout contracted by too great fondne IS
OF wires, brandies, and high living. Hence
=. A. IA. n -. a
temperate to be fit representative OF ihe
people Besides Nudge and Fudge &c. o
the Capital and consequent felicitics. They
are buttoned- hoded at once relatively y
one hundred, more or less, of devoted friends
who have the future political advancement Of
Fudge and Nudge very much at heart. Each
one of said one hundred friends, has, metam-
phorically speaking, seven candidates for the
six offices at the disposal Of our Honorable
Assembiymen, and the distracted Nudge and
Fudge are solicited under pain of the severe
dspleasure of each of said friends and of
their iutimations that " otherwise Bulge and
Nudge, who are competent men and greatly
desire the places now occupied by Fudge and
huuSc uiuSt IeCciNCy W. W vOeC ioi
each one of the candidates. One thousand
and one small boys in consecutive or
der tramp on the toes Of our happy and dis
tinguished friends in order to attract their at
tention and knock the ashes from their cigars
into their shirt bosoms, while they hand them
their cards for messenger in that branch OF
the Assembly to which our friends don't be-
long. Then comes the pleasant search con-
tinued for ten days for boarding which means
cold room, gritty buckwheat cakes, hash Of
questionable composition, ten dollars week,
and FIRE and washing extra. We hahn t it in
our heart to continue the list of enjoyments
and distinctions their position gives them.
We have given but a sample. Then, too,
there is the further compensation Of popular
gratitude, which invariably overlooks the
= forty-nine goods things the Legislature did
do, and INDUCES in unstinted censure for
the one thing they should have done but
didn't. Every Legislature appreciates that
reward. We commenced writing with an in
tention to reward our sovereign Legislators
In this manner for their neglect to pass the
registry law. but we have relented Wewon't
say anything severe about it, but we wish
they had passed the bill.