The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1866-06-21
oAaoerspa ynttQigentsr*
scraps. Facts and Fancies.

- SlaQQ0r 1S d WO0U VI A"PAN .
but let it alone and it dies The worse
you dig it up the more it flourishes.
An editor out West. who had served
on q jury, says he is SO full of law that it
is hard for him to keep from cheating
somebody. -.
aKeep your dog away from meP
said a dandy to butcher-boy. "Darn
the dog, he's always after puppies" said
the boy.
A paper is published in California
which aaunts the following motto from
she head of it's columns: "Every State for
itself and the devil take the hindn,0st."
Josh Billings thinks there used to
be more fun in thirty cents than there Is
now in seven dollars and half
A western editor wishes to know
whether the law against carrying Of
deadly weapons applies to doctors who
carry pills in their pockets.
"There now" said little girl, while
rumpaging a drawer in bureau, "there
now, grandpa has gone to heaven without
his spectacles."
- The Petersburg (Va.) bsder says:
"Most of the obituary notices we have
seen Of Gen. Scott represent him as hav-
ing been born in Petersburg. This is q
mistake. He was born within less than
q mile of Dinwiddle G. g."
At a printers festival On Franklin's
birthday, the following was the fifth
regular toast: "The editor and the law
.yer-the devil is satisfied with the copy
of the former, but requires the original Of
the latter"
In marriage the heart of widow is
like furnished apartment, where one is
apt to find something left there by a
former lodger.
- An Irish paper concludes a biogra-
phy as follows: "This extraordinary man
left no children except his brother and
he was killed at the same time"
"What q blessin' whisky pinch
would be to the human family if there
never wasn't no tomorrow mornin'p r said
an old topper, who was "enjoying" his GUS
tomary headache after his nights debauch.
A look may be osrelessly given, a
tone unconsciously spoken, yet the glance
of the eye or the sound of the voice may
convey an impression that will linger In
memory forever.
- Girls, beware Of transient young
men; never suffer the addresses of
stranger; recollect that one steady far
mer boy or mechanic is worth all the
floating trash in the world.
An exchange comes to US with q
notice that "Truth is crowded out this
ISSUE" This is almostooas bad as the up
country oditor who said, "For the evil
effects of Intoxicating drinks see inside"
A man came home drunk on cold
night and vomited in o basket containing
goslings, which his wife had placed before
the fire, upon seeing which he exclaimed,
uMy God, wife when did swallow them
things ?"
- Astronomers have discovered that
day is now about the one-hundreth of
second longer than it was two thousands
years ago. We have not noticed the diff
ference as yet.
= Some subscriber lately returned the
Petersburg 7adsc to the office of the pa
per, with a marginal note, requesting
them to s'send that paper to hell" The
editor apologies for having mistaken the
gentleman's post Office.
= Whatever you dislike in another,
take care to correct in yourselves.
allow does that look?" said Mr..
cramp, holding out his brawny hand.
aThat," interposed Amos. "looks as if
you were out of SOAP"
Mrs. Partington, in an illustration
of the proverb GA soft answer turnoth
away wrath" says that "It is better to
speak paragorically of a person than to
be- alt the time iinging epitaphs at him."
When Mr.. Livingston, the American
Minister, who was quite deaf, was intro
duced at the court of Napoleon, he had
prepared to answer the question he sup
posed the Emperor would ask, in regard
to his passage across the Atlantic.
Napoleon accostod him thus:
aHow is Mr.. Jefferson p
uVery boisterous very boisterousp
replied Mr.. Livingston, to the great
amusement of those present.
Not long since, q youth, older in
wit than wears, after being catechized