The Nashville daily union. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1862-1866, 1866-04-12
rrih.sIieht A. Air

Every bear should be taught TO
dance; for what is the use Of bruin
without hops2
Why is cat on top Of a house like
an Granger Because she looks roubCI
An English paper says trichinie can
not live at the temperature Of boiling
water so that cooking, by boiling wa
ter, of infected pork, is all that is re-
quired 70 render II harmless. This re-
minds the Hartford Press of the old
isdy's advice "AlEuz eat your chest
nuts billed, my son billed worms don't
never hurt nobody"
A gentleman, talking with q real-es-
tate sgent about the situation of farm
which he was about to purchase Of him
in q level neighborhood, remarked
'The country is excee1ingly beautiful,
and J do so admire rich fiat" $50
do I, said the obsequious but grinning
agent
Why may a foolish fellow reckon on
having the sympathy of q halter? Be
cause a halter has always felt for q fel
low in want of head piece.
Light infantry moVements-agitating
q cradle with baby in it.
A fellow who ought to know better
has just perpetrated the following
piece of un-called-for impertinence
Life is short and women are many.
Men have no time for close examine
ton OF each one, and to her who crowds
her best goods into show cases is often
awarded the highest prize.
i - ma I'd n
make the following remark, on seeing
one Of our fashionable (hooped) ladies:
ugh much wigwam "
Give q man brains and riches, and he
Is king give man brains without
riches, and he is slave; give a man
riches without brains. and he is a
monkey.
"RoW does that look2' said Mr..
Cramp, holding out his brawny hand.
THAT" interposed Amos, "looks as if
you were out of soap"
The auctioneer should speak only as
he is bid
A story is told of an suctioneer who
was proVokingly annoyed, while in the
exercise of his profession, by the ludi-
crous bids of a fellow whose object
seemed TO be to make sport for the
BUYERS rather than himself to buy. At
length enraged beyond endurance, the
knight of the ivory hammer, looking
around the room for a champion to
ayeng his wrongs, fixed his eyes upon a
biped of huge dimensions, very mon
arch of strength, and cried out
MARROW, what shall l give you TO
put that fellow out?'
Il will take one FIVE dollar bill"
"Done, done, you shall have It
Assuming the ferocious, knitting his
brows, spreading his nostrils like a
lions, and putting on the wolf all over
his head and shoulders, old NARROW
strobe off to the aggressor, and, selling
the terrified wretch by the collar, said
to him in q whisper that was heard all
over the room:
"My good friend, you 60 out with
me; I lOiH gre you half tie money!
Ozone doner said the fellow.
"Hurrah hurrah" shouted the au-
dience.
The auctioneer had the good sense
to Join in the laugh, and cody forked
out the V.
The Artists Adieu to his Picture
You be hanged.
Woman's Observation-Disclosures.
The Chilli question" Hows your
cold 2
Why is John Bigger's boy larger than
his father? Because he's little Big
ger
A dog that watches his chances to
steal bite is the worst kind OF watch
dog.
A warning needed at all fashionable
Rssemblages. Look out for paint
In female schools the demand is for
principals-not men.
Every plain girl has one consolation,
though not a pretty young lady, she
will, if she lives, be pretty old one.
Women guilty Of the folly Of tight
lacing, dress to kill
If you were TO ride upon a donkey
what fruit would you resemble2 A pear
lpair)
Why does the fool who never laughs,
remind you of the wisegt of men2 Be-
cause he's Solemn'un
The child of the sun-why, a grand
son. of course.