Weekly Calaveras chronicle., 1866-05-19
A Moment of Horror.

i For twenty-three years old Jake Will
lard has cultivated the soil of Baldwin
County, and drawn therefrom support
for self and wife. He is childless. Not
! long since Jake left the house in search
of cow. His course was through an
old worn out patch of clay land of about
six acres in extent, in the centre Of
which was a well twenty-five or thirty
fleet deep, that at some time had proba-
bly, furnished the inmates of dilapida-
ted house near by with water. In pass.
ing this spot, an i'll wind drifted jacks
"tile" from his head, and waited it to
the edge of the we'll, and in it tumbted.
Now the old gentleman had always
practiced the virtue of ecor omy, and be
Immediately set about recovering the
lost hat. He ran to the well, and find
ing it was dry at the bottom, he un-
coiled the rope which he had brought
for capturing the truant COW, and after
several attempts to catch moose, he
concluded to save time by getting down
into the we'll. 1t was a fact of which
Jake was no less oblivious than the
reader hereof, that Ned Wells was in
the dilapidated old building aforesaid,
and that an old blind horse with bell
on his neck, who had been turned out
to die, was lazily grazing within short
distance of the we'll. The devil him
self or some other wicked spirit, put it
into Ned's Uranium TO have a little fun !;
so he quietly slipped up to the horse,
and unbuckling the strap, approached
with steady 'ting-a-ling' to the edge
of the we'll.
:Dang the old blind horse! said the
man at the bottom of the well. Hes
coming this way sure, and amt got any
more sense than to fall in here. Whoa,
Billp
| But the continued approach of the
'tinga-ling' said just as plainly as words
that Bill wouldn't whoa Besides, Jake
was at the bottom, resting before trying
to shin up the rope
Great Jerusalem ? said he; the old
cuss will be top of me before 1 can
say Jack Robinson. Whoa, dang it
Whoa y
Just then Ned drew up to the edge
| of the we'll and with his foot kicked
little dirt into it.
'Oh Lord J exclaimed Jake, falling
on his knees at the bottom. I'm gone
now--whoa !! Now l lay me down to
sleep-whoa Il pray the Lord my
soul to-whoa now Oh, Lord have
mercy upon me ?
Ned could hold in no longer, and
fearing that Jake might suffer from his
fright, he revealed himself. Probably
Ned didn't make tracks with heels from
the we'll Maybe Jake was not up to
the top of it in short order, and you
might think he didn't try every night
for two weeks to get shot with his ri,
ae at Ned. Maybe not, I don't know.
But do know that if Jake finds out
who sent you this, it will be the last
squib you'll get.
CoNJUGAL CoRRREspoNDENcE.-Hus-
band (traveling. )-Scene frst. Room
in hotel. Spittoon full of cigar stumps.
Bourbon whiskey. Husband, in hur-
ry to go to the theatre, writing home:
dearest Susie My time is so occu-
pied with business that I can hardly
spare moment to write to you. Oh,
darling, how l miss you. and the only
thing that sustains me during my ab-
sence is the thought that every moment
thus spent is for the benefit of my dear
wife and children. Take good care of
yourself, my dear. Feed the baby on
one cows milk: Excuse haste, etc
Yours, ever, Tom.
Scene second.-Wife at home. Par
lor All the gas lit. Thirteen grass
widows. Fred, from around the cor
ner, with his violin; Jim, from across
the way, with his banjo; Jack, from
above, with his guitar; Sam, from be-
low, with his flute; lots of other fel-
lows, with their instruments. Dancing
and singing; side-board covered with
nuts, fruit, cake, wine, whiskey, etc.
Wife in hurry to dance, writing to
husband dearest Hubby How
lonesome I feel in your absence. The
hours pass tediously. Nobody calls on
me, and am constantly thinking of the
time when you will be home, and your
cheerful countenance light up the now
dreary routine of everyday life. Ny
household duties keep me constantly
employed. | am living as economical
as possible, knowing that your small
income will not allow of frivolous ex-
penses. But now, dear, will say good
bye, or will be too late for the month
ly concert of prayer. In haste, yours,