The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1866-01-26

Not many years ago, two noted individuals
lived in Cincinnati-then, il not now the
Queen City OF the West. Jerry Brown was
long-limbad long-faced, long-haired, and es-
pecially long-necked young lawyer, whose pro
fession was much better than his practice,
whose devotion to Johnny SCOTS Old Octo-
Der, was, alas! more assiduous than his Black
stone. He always found the law very dry,
and he never could worry much of it down,
without helping it along with fluid extract.
If he took up Coke on Littleton, he put down
porter on ale-and what he lacked in secur-
ing large practice at one bar, he made up at
another. But Jerry, or, as he was oftener
called from his sanctimcnious appearance, the
pastor, never drank like pig-although he
did sometimes like fish; but whenever he
met friend he never could resist the tempta-
ton to take something and he had hosts of
thirsty friends, who had the most taking ways
possible. Jack Wynsdale, his most cherished
companion, was a genius in his way. His
wit was full of attic salt, which helped make
him as thirsty as the parson-and he could see
Joke little further round the corner than
any other man. Jack and the parson were
boon married. and we regret to say, that not
long after their honeymoon had waxed, they
both had such large accessions to their prac-
tice, that they had frequent occasions to visit
their offices, in the evening. must admit,
however, that their night Office was usually at
and song, and the companiOnship of choice
spirits, they discussed the affairs Of the nation
and the interests Of their clients until the
small hours warned them that even the ex-
cuse of pressing business would hardly be ac-
cepted by their impatient and sleepless wives.
One night in November, Jack and Jerry
had continued their potations until two
o'clock in the morning, and neither was dis
posed to meet the domestic squal they would
very certainly find within their own Doors
coffee business" mi ght serve as an excuse for
ten or eleven, but never Tor halfpast two, and
then foffice business never did smell SO rum
my. f-
Il say, Jack, what shall we do?", said the
parson. 5if C.q4
II nave it, you write letter to your wife
dated yesterday, saying that you were very I'M
expectedly called to New Richmond on proies-
sional business-that you are miserable that
you had no time to say good-by, and that you
will return tomorrow. l will write a note of
the same tenor, saying that have been called
to Lawrenceburg Then you will take my
note early this morning and deliver 1t in per-
son to my wife-with an apology for having
neglected to deliver it yesterday, while l viii
do the same by yours"
"Capital Capital p said the parson. "John-
ny Scott, bring us the ink-horn and sheet of
paper" tIr.5
The notes were soon written and addressed,
when the two worthless called for more liquor
and cigars, and prepared to snake a night of
it."
The neSt morning, early, each started on his
respective mission. letter in hand. With ach-
ing head and smarting eyes, Jack assembled
Mrs. Browns steps and pulled the bell. Mrs.
Brown came instantly to the door, with every
indication of having passed a sleepless night
"Why, Mr.. Brown, do you know what has
become otmy husband ?"l -
s, eyes, Mrs Brown. On yesterday, he was
suddenly called upon by wealthy client to
try an important case at New Richmond, and,
wrote this note in great haste for me to hand
you. am very sorry, but it quite escaped my
attention, until happened to find it in my
pocket when was dressing just now, and /
hurried around to make my apologies and de-
liver the letter. s,s ,,,s-1
Mrs. Brown tore open the envelope and
read; tahF g la1
aDearest Wife: I am distressed to say that
client has just entered my Office in great
haste, and insists that should leave immedi-
ately for Lawrenceburg, to attend very inn
portant suit that is to be tried there to-mor-
row. Be assured that would not leave you
for even a single short day for all the suits a
lawyer ever wore or won, if it was not abso-
lutely impossible to avoid it. With thou
sand regrets and kisses, am as ever, YOUR de-
voted JACK WYNsDALE."
. One moment, and then fash of intelligence
like lightning in summer cloud Illuminated
Mis-. Browns countenance.
"Oh! Mr.. Wynsdale, you must be precious |
pairl This letter was written by you to your
wife, and / suppose Mr.. Brown is delivering
similar epistle to Mrs Wynsdale. You quite |
neglected TO see whether you took the right |
notes or not,-and how are your clients
wealthy? and how well they must pay for
such exhausting laborsl Oh! YOU dreadful,
horrible man."
Mrs. Caudle never told the history of those |
two irate wives, and Johnny Scott said he
lost two of bis best customers. met the par
son in Congress last winter, bnt poor Jack is
under the sod.-lN. Y. Weekly Magazine.