The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1866-10-16

All euitor III NeW Jersey announces the
death CT lady Of his acquaintance and Thus
touchingly add: "In her decease the sick lost
an invaluable friend. Long will she So IN tt.
the balm of consolation in one hand, and a
cup of rhubarb in the other"
Post-office clerks occasionally get off Il funny
thing A clerk in our post-of1ice heard tap
at the widow of the ladies' department, when
who should he find there bat man by the
name of Drake. ''Mr. Drake" said the clerk,
will you please to go to the other side; this
department is for the ducks
There was once clergyman in New Hamp-
shire noted for his long sermons and indoent
habits. GLOW is it, said man to his neigh
Dor, "Parson -, the LATEST man living
writes interminable sermons ?" "Why," said
the other, 'he probably gets to writing and
he is too lazy to stop"
Resignation is virtue that is cften made a
necessity of in the political world.
Benefits please, like flowers, while they are
fresh
Horrible! A Western editor thus 'csses' an
opponent: "May lis COW give sour milk and
hens 'bad-eggs;' in short, may his daughter
marry one-eyed editor, his business go to
ruin, and he go to-Congress.
A prudent man advised his drunken servant
to put by his money for rainy day In a
few weeks the master inquired how much of
his wages he had saved. "Faith none al all .
said he, sit ralned yesterday and it all went. ,
A Maine editor says he cannot imagine
when editors have leisure time, 'unless it is
after the ferryman carries us over SLyx, and
then We have no doubt but that.the old fellow
would besiege us for Il puff on his boat.
A oonceited Juvenile pulpit performer I'M
portuned the bishop of his diocease to allow
HIM to preach.
q have no objection to permit you" said
the bishop, "but nature will not"
A charity scholar, under examination in the
Psalms, being asked "what is the pestience,
that walketh in the darkness p replied,
please sir, bed-b bugs"
The people of New Orleans have now to
import sugar and molasses for home Use.
There is a seduction suit in New York for
500 900 damages.
A female has been born in La Crosse with
two perfect tones. If she live and marry,
won't her husband catch it? $50
Radical speakers are like a great river,
greatest at the mouth
Loving hearts are like beggars-they live
on what is given them.
The only blusterer from whom brave man
will take blow is the wind.
The latest thing out-policemen.
warning needed at fashionable assem-
blage-Look out for the paint.
Many fashioned mouth has been
disfgured and made hiJeous by the fiery
tongue within it.
1t is wiser and better to hold the torch of
truth to the mind than the torch OF persecu-
ton to the body.
If you want a sinking fund, throw Your
money into the river, or invest it in continent
tai lottery tickets.
Some hearts, like the evening .primroses,
open mos. beautifully in the shadows of ile
We mcy owe 1t to our enemies t. forgive
we owe it to ourselves not to forget.
WANTED.-The receipt which il given
when gentlemen ''pays his respects"
Our friend j. ID. was asked by a Young
lady who had been dancing the German"
whether "he saw her feet pr ''No, madam
he said, with "a solemn shake of the head
far, from 1"
An Indiana paper tells of the recent killing
OF rattlesnake with one hun,hvd and ten
rattles
If ladies appreciated the beauty of their
feet as they do chat Of their necks, shoulders,
etc, they would probably go to balls bare
fooled.
A drunkard being told that the earth WAS
round said that accounts for my rolling SO
much"
The editor Of newspaper says that he
never dotted an 81 but once in his life and
a " N, ii,,llI ,AgttI
1t is very silly to be proud of your person
birth, or the riches of your relations. Worth
constitutes true greatness.
The Hot.entot girls wear necl la es of b lied |
pig-tails, Tfipe is little worn now.