Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1866-07-05

Marriage Of JOHNNY BeedIe.
- ~FT Trf
was spunking up to Sally Jones like all
vengeance, and threatening to give her the
butt end Of my sentiments Well, / was as
good as my word. The next fSabberday
wentsright to work, after nesting, upon the
outer man, sas' Deacon Carpenter says, and.
by shutdown things looked &about right l.
said nothing; but when r stood. up to II e.
and whiskers,s and so forth, sawAa little
Teller there thatlooked wickeds5 And, says
/, if Sally Jones knows which side her
bread is buttered--B no matter, she
shan't say I didn't give her a chance.
Well, | went over to the Squires pretty
well satisfied in my mind so, after futter-
ing and Growing about her little while,
up and showed the cloven foot.
:" Sally" said l, "will you take me for
better or worser?"
This put her to considering; and gave
a flourish about the room, and cut curly
cue with my right foot, as much as to say
take your time.
as anybody in the world, John, butt de-
D.
t'You can't, ha? and why? ?" 70C.
HCause" 4 - Il -
ssCa,lse wbat?'' 7 I r. 0tt.ilt
"Cause | can't-and that's enough.
would in a minute, John, but for only one
reason, and that Pm afraid to tell ye."
"Poh, poh," says T. don't be bashful !;
if there's only one stump in the way, 1 guess
here's feller-"
ha 10 che
driver. Now, you shan't tell nobody, John,
1t seemed to me the YER old boy had got
into the women. They fairly put me to the
nonplush. All this time my popularity with
the ladies was amazing To see them fat
tering and soft-soaping me all over, you
would have sworn that had nothing to do
but to pick and choose. 1 had as much gal
lal ing to do as wanted everywhere; and
forpolfseness and gentility, | never turned
my back to no man. Then, they were SO
thick and familiar with me that they didn't
care what they said or did before me and
finally, whenever they had any errands or
chores to do, who but | was, the fayorite
bird to fetch and carry? l was forever and
ever acting and cantering from post to pill
lar, to do their bsddingg Rain or shine,
snow err mud, nothing stopped me; and
may say I.fairly earned their smiles by the
sweat Of my brow. Then it was: IS Oh,
Mr.. Beedle What should we do without
Mr.. Beedle?" But when | caught one
alone, and began to touch on matrimonial
sentiments, then how quick the tune was
changed Oh, the ways of the women are
curious!
Well, as | was going moping along home
from Squire Jones', l fell i with Doctor
Dingley. The docter saw in a minute that
something was the matter, and he went to
work and pumped the whole secret out of
me. Then he seemed so friendly that l up
and told him all my experience from begin
ming to end.
"Well, john" says he, 81 advise you to
wait until the twenty of February,
when the gals turn round to court the fell
lers. It's none of my business, but if
was you I wouldn't let the women folks
make fool of me any more.
Well, | took resolution, and. stuck to it
FIRM I.stuck to it till along pretty wellin
January when had to go to singing school.
But that was nothing if it hadn't fell to my
lot to go home with Hannah Peabody four
times runnin. Politeness before everything.
Well, she kept growing pl ettier and prettier
every time, but only grit my teeth and
held on the harder. ,.ea. ,9jial
By-and-by Sabbath night came round,
and |. felt sort of uneasy moping about
home; and says I this resolution win, never
set we'll upon my stomach without air. and
exercise; and .beferc'I was done thinking
ofcthissI was more than half way to Gap
tain Raabody g. 1t VAS about daylight
down as l vas passing By the Kitchens bat
hearing a sort of suikering, slipped up
and peeped into the window, just out OF
curiosity ~ --sA = "a - =
There was no candle burnIng-for Mrs:
Peabody is saving of tallow-but could
see Hannah and Poll Partridge, the help,
telling fortunes in the ashes, by 6re-light.
/ turned round to 60 off, and right against
Jack Robinson. Jack was come to set up
with the help, and would insist upon it,
should go in and see Hannah.
She hasn't had spark this month, F"
says he, and in you shall go, or I'll lick
ye."
Well, there is no lodging here, and all
had to do was to grin and bear it, So in
went, and once in, good by to resolution.
Inc short and the long of it is | was soon
as deep IN the mud as | had been in the
mire.
But rather guess had cut my eye teeth
by this time. If hadn't learned some
thing about the nature of women the kicks
mad taken from all quarters fell ON bar
ren ground. There is no way of dealing
with them but TO coax and fatter, you gain
notping' let me tell you, by saving of soft
soap and you must be sly about it. 1t is
no way to catch wicked devil of colt, in
apasture, to march right up, bride in hand;
you must sort of side along as if you was
going past, and whistle, and pretend to be
looking tother way; and so round and
round TIL at last you corner him up; then
Jump ana clinch him by the forelocks Oh,
u not SO great fool as might be-
put II was long and tedious business
'ei0re Hannah and could come to any sort