Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1866-02-03

swered the ring.
M,s. DIR. Nudge was on the steps,
dressed in her best. 49,
"YesLI-dare say" stammered
Keith, ''my wife is absent, and am the
Bridget. "
Mrs. Nudge sailed into the parlor,
which was darkened TO exclude the sun,
and without stopping to look at her
seat, sunk into the frying pan on the
sofa.
s.Jupiter p cried Mr.. Keith, you've
done it now"
: Mrs. nj. sprang up. the grease drip
ming from her rich silk dress on the car
net Her face grew dark. She was
aGout to fy into passion, but controll-
ed herself, bowed haughtlly and left the
house. -
Keith returned to the kitchen a little
crestfallen, for Mrs. Nudge was Lady
before whom he desired to appear par
ticularly well.
There was tremendous cracking In
the oven. He thought of his pudding
and looked in. The burnt rice had
hoped all over the oven; the basin had
melted apart, and the pudding was not
done. lie shut the door on the ruins
in disgust. and looked after his potatoes
only to find them boiled to a perfect
Jelly. Aud Just as he made the discov-
cry there was a sharp peal at the door
bell.
Creation There's that abomina-
able bell again. 1 wish folks would
s'av as home-l1l lock all the doors,
..ud cut al the bell wires after to day. "
At the door he found Mr.. and Mrs.
Fidget and the children.
'.My dear MIR. Keith, how do you do?'
cried Mrs. Fidget. I'VE were in town
and thought we'd step III to dinner.
Where's Mrs. KEITH"
'She's gone away" said Mr.. Keith
ruefully, wondering what he should
feed them on; ''walk in, do, am the
house keeper to-day"
''Yes, so I should judge. But of
course. you make a splendid one. /
remember you used to be telling Eirs.
Keith and myself how easy housekeep-
ing must be. 1t must be mere play to
you. Don't put yourself about, l beg
you"
''Put myself about indeed" cried
Keith, retreating to the kitchen.
.'Good graciousi what shall L do? I'd
give a hundred dollars if Mary was only
here"
He drew out the table and set it with
ont any cloth; then took Of the plates
and put on a cloth-the very one he had
wiped the dishes on. The task COM
pleted he put on some more potatoes,
and some more steak; burned the steak
to a cinder; took off his potatoes when
he did his meat, and put them all upon
the table. There was loaf of bakers
bread in the cupboard; he paraded that,
and called his guests to dinner.
A quiZzicai smile spreau over Mrs.
Fidget's face at the sight of the repast.
Keith was in a cold perspiration.
Ma, my plates all greasy, and SOS
my knife; I can't eat on dirty
dishes. cried little Johnny Fidget.
And my fork Is wet all over with
water that's dropping eff the table
cloth; and my later amt half billed, !"
cried little Sue Fidget.
A slight noise In the kitchen drew the
attention of Mr.. Keith.
Jupiter r. cried he, elf Mrs.
O'Flatherty's dog amt making off with
my steak -
He jumped from the table and started
IN hot pursuit. The dog made the best
of it; keith's unsccustomed attire was
a sad drawback, and he made but little
Roadway.
"Kil him." he yelled to the crowd
that joined III the pursuit. I'm give
fifteen dollars for his hide"
Mrs. O'F'latherty herself appeared on
the scene, with skillet of hot water.
Tech him If We dare - she cried
TN break the bones of every mothers
son of wees. Stand from forninst or
yen rue the day."
Keith took step forward; stepped
on his skirt and pitched head first into
a wine cellar, where half dozen men
were playing cards.
1.-The divel In petticoats," exclaimed
one gamester. and the place was emp
tied quicker than wink.
The police picked up Mr.. Keith con-
siderably bruised, and carried him
home. His company had taken their
and somebody, not having
the fear Of the law upon them. had
entered and stolen hundred dollars
worth of property.
Then MIR. Keith sent the following
note:
DEAR MARY:-Come home. give up beat.
woman does have a great deal to do. con-
Tess myself incompetent to manage. Come
home aud you shall have a new silk dress and
a daughter Of Erin to divide your labors.
Yours, faithfully, III. KEITH.