The Evansville journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 1866-1870, 1866-07-31


Gently published, contain some home
bred proverbs, which, although ex-
pressed in dialect and style that we
hold in abomination, still are worth
reading. We give few of them:
argy in this way, if a man is
right he can't be too radikal: if he is
rong he kant be too conservatiffs."
1t is highly important, when a
man makes up his minde tew- bekum a
raskall, that he shud examine hisself
clusly, and see if he amt better kon-
structed for phool."
If thare waz nothing but truth in
this Wurld, fool would stand just as
good chanse az wize man"
When Teller gifts goin down
hill, it dus seem as tho evry thing had
bin CREASED for the okashun."
" Thare are CRATE multitude ov
individuals who are like blind mules,
anxious enough to kick, but kant tell
WHARF. .
81 Large boys move slo,' this ere
proverb don't apply tn lies, for the big
ger tina ar the faster tina go.
There is 2 things in this life for
which we are never fully prepared,
and that liz twins.
Marin for love ma be little
risky, but it is very honest"
We are ap tn hate them who wont
take our advise, and despise them
who do"
Ginowine proverbs ar like good
kambrick needles-short, sharp and
shiny"
IF you want tew git a sure crop,
and a big yield for the seed, SOW wilde
oats.
:" Moste ov the advise we reseave
from others il not so much on evidence
of their affeckshun for us, as it is an
evidence of their affeckshun for them
selves"
." Honesta is the best policy but
don't take my wurd for it, try it. !"
Gravity is very often mistaken for
wlsdum, but there is as much difference
as there is between a glide board and
the man who made it.
What man spends in this life.
he saves: what he don't git want ment
for him, and what he saves, he loozes."
Wise men don't expeck tn do away
with the visissitudes ov life, they only
expeck to blunt the edge ov them
"The prinsipal difference between
luxury and necessary il, the prise"
Rize arly, work hard and late,
liv on what W kant sell, Civ nuthin
ava, and if yu don't di ritch, and go
tn the devil, yu ma su me for dam
ages.
N. B. The abov remarks is not in
tended tn be personal.
Real happiness don't consis so
mulch in what man don't hav, az it
duz in what he don't want"
"A man runnin for offs puts me in
minde ov dog that's lost--he smells
ov everybody he meets, and wags him
self all over"
1T il dredful ely tn be phool-a
man kan be one and not know it. y
He replies as follows to one of his
" correspondents styling himself
Cord-Now yu ask me teW mulch
[ kant Civ no sartin resipee tew make
Teller pop the question. Sum men
are awful slow on court, tina are
like olde houn dogs, all tina want IL
to be sure tina are on the rite track,
and don't seem tew kare if tina don't
never cum up with the game. If
was a gal, and one ov this kind ov
dogs got after me, [ wud hole rite off,
and if he didn't commense tn dig me
out at onst, | sud kno he wuz only
hunting for fun.
A loafer> got hold Of a green per-
simmon, which, before they are
ripened by the frost, are said to be
the most bitter and puckery fruit
known. He took the persimmon cut
side the garden wall, and commenced,
upon it by Selling a generous mouth
full of the fruit, which proved to be in
a state to frizzle his lips and tongue
most provokingly.
How do you like it?" inquired
the owner of the garden, who had
been watching him.
The saliva was oozing from the cor