Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1866-11-22

anu IN enc J0rn or an Otnef nave kept
up ever since. I am able to say from expe-
rience. that landlady is indispensable tt
a ga're.eer. In ny next set of notes vii
tell you about the one have now as well as
some others, who now belong to the unre
turning past. Pr@territa MIXTURE non posse
mus.
COnaEque.
Why is a man who has struck oil like
q true prophet? Because he has augured
acetJ
An Irish editor, in speaking of the
miseries of Ireland, says: "Her cup Of
misery has been for ages overlooking, and is
not yet full"
| ST do declare, Sal, you 90 look good
enough to eat" Gwen, solomon, amt |
eating as fast as can ?" replied Sal, with
her mouth full. $50
-' That's very singular, sir, 2 said a
young lady to gentleman who had kissed
her. ooh, well, my dear Miss, | win soon
make it plural"
-"Why, isn't my shirt clean ?" quoth
one Bohemian to another s.Well, yes, . was
the answer; ''its clean for brown, but its
awful dirty for white.'
throw sewing machines in the shade, when
we consider how many Austrians are
men-d dead by means of it.
"A lady having returned thet she
thought there should be tax on the single
state, an old bachelor replied: eyes,
madam, as on other luxuries.'
The anti. spiritualists deride the idea
that chair can move, and tip and dance,
but we have been at many public meeting
where the chair made a speech. 'e
Why would lady who stays at home
all the year round be likely to prove her
self false relation to her nephew {?
Ans.-Because she is not huant. $3.50
-" My dear young lady" .exclaim ed
gentleman, 81 am astonished at your senti-
ments You actually make me start-upon
my word you do !" "Well, sir,'' replied
the damsel, "Ive been wanting to start
you for the last hour" ..a m H. .e,-..,-
The presiding mistress at boarding
house chopped the tea was good" SsVery
good, indeed, madam" was the reply; but
Jones, between truth and politenegs, OBJ
served that "The tea was excellent, but the
a0ater was smokey" III 10
a young lady stepped into the store
of merchant by the name of Wade, and
very innocently said she would like to be
soeIghed (Wade).l 81 am very sorry" said
he, % but my wife will tell you that you are
too late by a couple Of years.
"A good story is told Of clergyman
not far from Titusville, who has lately in
vested considerably in OIL In giving out
his text one morning he said it would be
found in the last chapter of Acts, the last
verse, and the last half Of the verse, and
one third Of the OIL.
Ills there any person you would par
ticularly wish me to marry?" said a widow
expectant to her dying spouse, who had
been somewhat Of tyrant in his day.
"Marry the devil if you like !" was the
gruff reply "0h nc, my dear, you know
1t is not lawful to marry two brothers"
a Dutchman at Decatur married a
second wife in about week after the loss of
wife No / The Sabbath following the
bride asked her lord to take her riding,
and was duly 90 cut up" with the following
| response: 'You tink | ride out mid anoder
woman SO soon after the death of mine frau?
No, no
"A man inquired at the Postoffioe in
Erie, New York, the other day, for a letter
for Emery Hogden,n He was told there
was none. "Look ere,'' he replied, a little
apgrily, you've heKamined hodd letter
for my name. 1t don't commence with a
hatch! 1t begins with no Look in the
ole that's got the hos"
"A gentleman, crossing a narrow
bridge, said to a countryman whom he met:
''I think this narrow causeway must be
very dangerous, my honest friend; pray.
are nobpeople lost here sometimes?" "Lost /
no, sir; never knew anybody lost here in
my life; there were several drowned. but
they were all found again.
--s' Watts de matter watts de matter ?''
exclaimed an old Dutehman as he tucked up
his apron and ran out of his shop to know
the meaning of crowd in his -neighbor-
hood "Yats de matter 2" .sThere is
man killed" said g bystander. sob, ish
dat all?" said our friend, in disappoint-
ment, "ish dat all? shust man kilt!
Humph fought it wash fight"
a good story is told Of rustic youth
and buxorl country girl, who sat facing
each other at a husking party, The youth,
smitten with the charms of the beautiful
maiden, only ventured sly look, and now
and then touching Patty's foot under the
table. The girl, determined to make the
youth express what he appeared so warmly
to feel, bore with these advances a little
while in silence, when she cried out, .'Look
here, if you love me say SO; but don't dirty
my stockings
Among the parlor games occasionally
used, is one called 'squaringa word" 1t
consists in arranging words in such a man
ner that perfect square of known words
shall be made which shall read vertically in
the same order as horizontally. The prob
lem of "squaring the circle" which has
puzzled mathematicians for ages, has been
solved in this way. Thus: