davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13
A Beautiful Conception.

A New York artist has painted a
picture entitled "Ecce Homo Honestus. .
1t is Abraham Lincoln, with Diosenes,
represented as dropping his famous
lantern, in the background-the object
of his long search Of twenty centuries
accomplished. There is something pc
culiarly appropriate and touching in
this conception. Nothing could more
completely express the leading charac-
teristic of Abraham Lincoln. If there
ever was strictly honest man-honest
in every relation of life-honest in
thought, in act, in purpose-honest in
his dealings with the world honest
with God and his own conscience-that
man was Abraham Lincoln. We chal-
lenge the annals of the past or present
to point to man entitled to historic
mention whose record is so free from
reproach as that of him behind whom
the artist has dropped the lantern of
Diogenes. As the "reminiscences of this
oad-browed son of the prairies accu-
mulate before US; as the recollections
of those who have shared his friendship
and stood in his presence yield to the
world the stories Of his devotion to his
country, his frmness in the right, his
charity for the erring; as we read his
messages and letters anew, so direct in
purpose, SO candid in expression, so
grandly simple in construction, it is
difficult to believe that he could ever
have Intentionally erred in anything.
Had such a man lived three centuries
ago, his name would be read to-day in
the catalogue Of saints. The quaint
stories that he told, always so full of
meaning, were not the frivolous pastime
of ruler Indifferent to the fate of his
country, but the means he sometimes
to relieve his mind of the
burden of anxiety which weighed him,
like an Atlas, down. During the darkest
period of the rebellion, when the fate
of the nation seemed to hang trembling
in the balance, the Secretary of War
called upon the President to confer upon
the means for counteracting the effect
of a sweeping disaster to our armies.
The President commenced the moment
Gus conference with story. "This is
no time for jesting, Mr.. President"
said the Secretary, in tone of reproach.
True" said Mr.. Lincoln, ''but SO great
is my anxiety, that, did not sometimes
divert my mind with story, should
die" This was Abraham Lincoln.
The statement that he requested an
attendant to sing lively song while
passing over the field of Gettysburg, is
a coarse SANDER. The man who was so
keenly alive to the suHerings and sacri-
fees of our soldiers as Abraham Line DIN,
could not have been betrayed into such
an expression of ill-timcd levity. AS
time wears on, we shall be better able
to understand and appreciate the rugged
grandeur of the soul and acts and pur-
poses of our martyr President. The
artist, in dropping the lantern of Do
genes behind 'Honest Old Abe" has
given emphatic form to the conviction
of every unprejudiced mind; for, had
the cynic survived the centuries that
have rolled between him and the present,
he would surely have written ''Eureka!'
under the name of Abraham Lincoln
Territorial Enterprise.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13
Notice to TaX-Payers

YNHE DELINQUENT TAN LIST FOR THE
II year 1865 is now in my hands for collection
Those knowing themselves indebted for taxes will
please pay the same and save cvst.
S ROSENBAUM, District Attorney.
December 4th, 1855. n6-tf
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

A VERY fat man, for the purpose
of quizzing his doctor, asked him to
prescribe for complaint, which he
declared was sleeping with his mouth
open. "Sir," said the doctor, ''the
disease is incurable. Your skin is too
short, so that, when you shut your eyes,
your mouth opens"
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

SoFr SoAp.-For lieutenant, cali
him captain; for middle-aged lady,
kiss her, and say that you mistook her
for her daughter fora young gentleman
rising fifteen, ask his opinion respecting
the comparative merits of razor; for
young ladies, if you know their color to
be natural, accuse them of painting.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13
An Unlucky Dutchman.

Brick Pomeroy, of the La Crosse
(Wisconsin) Democrat, is the author
of many good and funny things. We
leave our readers to decide as to the
merits of the following:
Hillficker Snicksnacker, a Teutonic
vender of sour krout, wooden combs,
crude cabbage, striped mittens, cotton
suspenders, and such ''liddle dings,"
with true patriotic zeal, left his home
in La Crosse, at the commencement
of the war, and enlisted as grocery
keeper behind the suffers tent, on the
Potomac. When he went away, it was
with the firm intention to make some
monish, if it took all Summer, and
nobly did he fight it out on his line.
How he did it is best told as he told it
to us on his return, last week:
"You see, Mr.. Bumroy, der trum
beats, und der call coomes to go to wars
NIT arms. Ise be patriot so much as
Sheneral Washburn, or Sheneral Curtiss,
or Sheneral Butler, or Sheneral Bangs,
or any of dem Shenerals what lives to
come home great men. So puys some
liddle dings, and gets some babers from
the war committee, und goes NIT ter
boys ter be patriots, und sell some liddle
dings, und make some monish. | kiss
my vrow five, nineteen dimes, und goes
NIT derwar. goes ter Chambersburg
und | makes much monish. One day,
| poke mine window out un mine head
ter hear ter serenade, und dink of some
ding, when see dat Stonewall Shackson
init his droops und der pig prass pand
coomln down ter street, playing like ter
tyhl on der prass pand,
Who's pin here since I'se pin gomez:
''Dat Stonewall Shackson is ter tyGl
nit fghtins, und I puts my monish in
mine booklet und little babers in mine
bag, und | goes so quick as never wash
to Gettysburg. Und dere opens some
more sthore, und sells some more hddle
dings. Und one day hears men on
der horseback ridin down der sthreet
like dunder, und den l pokes der window
under mine head und looks myself up
der sthreet, und dare coomes dat tyfl,
Stonewhall Shackson, playing dat same
udder tune as | heard pefore,
Who's pin here since Use pin gone,
Den | makes mine monish coome in
ter mine booklets, und makes mine bag
coome in ter mine babers, und puts mine
sign on ter pig sthore on der corner, und
dinks | 90 to Wisconsin to see mine
vrow as | haint seen in desc two years,
so long time as never wash.
''Den | coomes home, ,und my vrow she
make talk und tell me who's dere 2
''Den l say Hillhicker Snicksnacker,'
und she knows dat ish mine name, und
she make herself coome out of ter house,
und give me nine, seven times kiss on
my face so goot as never wash.
''Den, Mr.. Bumroy, looks NIT mine
eyes und | sees some dings! Und so l
ask mine vrow if she's pin married since
| go off to pc patriot; und if she no got
married, why she makes so much grow
when l pc gone NIT ter wars! Und l
gets mad as ter tyfil, und den l dinks
of dat tamn Sheneral Stonewall Shack
son und his pig prass pand, und sings,
Who's pin here since Use pin gone p
''Und now, Mr.. Bumroy, soompody
makes troobles NIT me, for Fse peen
gone two years. Und know some
dings, und l goes pack NIT ter war, und
| sings dat tamn Stonewall Shackson
oil do. -,
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13
A MILLER had his neigbhor arres

A MILLER had his neighbor arrested
under the charge of stealing wheat from
his mill, but, being unable to substan-
tate the charge by proof, the Court
adjudged that the miller should make
an apology to the accused. 'Well,' y
said he, II have had you arrested for
stealing my wheat l can't prove it !;
and | am sorry for it."
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

A PERSON meeting an old man with
silver hair, and very black, bushy
beard, asked him how it happened that
his beard was not so gray as his head.
Because it is twenty years younger"
the old gentleman replied.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13
Notice.

a Ii REGISTERED COUNTY WARRANTS
"A up to and including December lst, 1855. will
be paid by presenting the same at my Office, ST.
Nicholas Hotel Oroville. H. 5. HUNT.
County Treasurer Butte County.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

The death of the fattest man IN the
world, NJ. Helm, is recorded. He was
employed in Paris as translator. His
age was ~, and he weighed 500 pounds.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

A TOUCH ONE An Eastern paper,
referring to murder, describes negro
who must be a tough one. 1t says !:
Bundy, the negro who committed the
murder, is a noted desperate. Some
time since. in quarrel on the levee at
New Orleans, he was cut so badly that
part of his intestines fell to the ground,
yet he succeeded in despatchipg his
adversary, and recovered. A year ago,
he killed another negro, but succeeded
in getting clear-and, a short time
previous to that affair, he was shot three
times with a revolver, the three balls
taking effect in his head, but from which
he again recovered. The sheriff now
proposes to try if hemp went settle him.
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

JOSH BILLINGS has the following
"Answers to Correspondence -
".Mathe,c."- "a cheerful letter about
musketoze. Musketoze are Mail, Fe-
mail and Neutral gender i know it
i have examined them. They are good
liyers. They are very profitable tew
raise-2 musketoze, and a cesspool,
will stock farm, in 80 daze.
'Parent." This epistle IL in reply
tew an anxious father, who has got
badly stuck with son, and wants tew
kno how tew fetch him up. | wrote
back to him (among others things),
thusly: son pudding and milk, and
hickory brush. half s half-Yures in
haste, Josh Billings"
The weekly union record., 1866-01-13

LOVE thy nsighbor-not his wife.
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
RELIEF IN TEN MINUTES.
RRYAN'S PULNONIC WATERS.

eSy- The original Medicine established in 1887,
and first article of the kind ever introduced under
the name of {" Pulmonic Waters, in this or any
other country all other Pulmonic Waters are coun
terfeits. The genuine can be known by the name
BRYAN being stamped on each Wafer.
These Waters have beer before the public for
nearly 80 years, and the immense sale attained,
not only in America but in foreign countries fully
attest their intrinsic worth. The medical proper
ties are superior to any other article offered for the
cure of Pulmonary Bronchial affections, and the
quantity contained in each box is nearly double
that of the many worthless limitations advertised.
BRYAN's PULMoNIC WATERS
euIe Coughs. Colds, Sore Throat, Hoarseness,
Asthma. Catarrh, Bronchitis Difficult Breathing,
Splitting of Blood, Pains in the Chest, ineipient
Consumption and all diseases Of the Lungs. Not
only affording temporary relief, but effecting a
rapid and lasting cure and are warranted to give
satisfaction in every instance They do not nau-
seate like alcoholic compounds, and the medicinal
properties are combined in form so agreeable and
pleasant to the TASTE that any child will readily
take them. One dose will always afford
RELIEF IN TEN MINUTES.
To vocalists and Public Speakers, these Waters
are peculiarly valuable; they will in one day re-
move the most severe occasional hoarseness; and
their regular use for few days will, at all times,
increase the power and ,fexibility Of the voice,
greatly improving its tone, compass and clearpess,
for which purpose they are regularly used by many
professional vocalists. ty
The very great celebrity of this invaluable RENE
dy has induced unprincpled persons to prepare
base limitations, which disappont the just expeeta.
tions of the purchaser, and nure the character OF
the genuine medicine
See that the word BRYAN" is stamped on
each Wafer and also observe the fac simile Of the
signature of the proprietor JOB MOSES, on
each wrapper, to counterfeit whichis forgery. Of
Tending parties will be dealt with to the full extent
of the law. Bryan's Pulmouic Waters are for sale
by all Druggists JOB MOSES, Sole Proprietor
! m6 81 Cortland street. N. Y
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
DIR. MARSHAL'S
CATARRH SNUFF.

This Snuff has thoroughly proved itselfto be The
bes, article known for curing the Catarrh, Cold IN
the Head and Headache. II has been found an
excellent remedy in many eases Of Sore Eyes.
prafness has been removed by it, and Hearing mas
often been greatly improved by its use.
In IA FRAGRANT and uorreeable and t..
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
Gives Immediate Relief

to the dull heavy pains caused by diseases of the
Head The sensations after ing it are delightful
and irvigorating-it opens and purges out all OBJ
siructions, strengthens the glands, and gives a
healthy action TO the parts affec ted.
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
More than Thirty Years.

of sale and use of DR.. Marshall's Latarrh and
Headache Snuff, has proved its great value Tor all
the common diseases of the Head, and at this mo-
ment it stands higher than ever before.
II is recommended by many of the best physi-
clans, and is used with great success and satisac-
ton everywhere
Read the Certificates of Wholesale Druggists
IN 1854.
The Undersigned having for many years been
acquainted with DR.. Marshall's Catarrh and Head
ache Snuff, and sold it in our wholesale trade
cheerluly state that we believe it to be equal in
every respect, 20 The recommendations given of it
for the cure Of Catarrhal Affections, and that i. is
decidedly the best article we have ever known for
all common diseases Of the head.
Burr Perry, Boston. Barnes d Park, n. York
Reed, Austin d Co, g ALB. d d. Sands,
Brown, Lamson d Co." Steph. Paul d Co. "
Reed Cutler g. Co. :" Israel Minor d Co.
Seih W. Fowle, =" McKesson d Robbins
Wilson, Fairbank&Co. A. L. Scovll Il Co. "
Henshaw, Edmand&Co M. Ward, Close T. Co. "
II. H. Hay Portland Me. Bush d. Gale
For sale by all Druggists. Try it. Gm
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09

Marriage and Celibacy, an Essay Of
warning and instruction for Young Men.
Also, Diseases and Abuses which PROSTATE the
vital powers. with sure means of relief. Sent
free Of charge in sealed lettercnvelopes. Ad-
dress. DR.. j. SKIIIIN HovGuroN, Howard
Association, Philadelphia, Pa.
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
THE GREAT ENGLISH REMEDY

THE GREAT ENGLISH REMEDY.
PROTECTED By ROYAL LETTERS PATENT.
SIR JAMES CLARKE'S
Celebrated Female Pills.
Prepared from prescription of Sir j. Clarke, Nd
Physician Extraordinary to the Queen
This invaluable medicine is unfaiing in the
cure of all those painful and dangerous diseases to
which the female constitution is subject. 1t mod
eares all excess and removes all distractions, from
whatever cause, and speedy cue may be relied on.
TO MARRIED LADIES
it is particularly suited. 1t will, in short time,
bring on the monthly period with regularity.
Each bottle, price 81, bears the Government
stamp of Great Britain. to prevent counterfets.
CAUTION.
These Pills should not be taken by Females dur
ing the First Three Months Of Pregnancy as they
are sure to bring on Miscarriage, but at any other
time they are safe.
Every woman knows that the bloom of health
must fade with the slightest irreguarty or OBJ
struction of the menses. These Pills are truly
the wonan's friend in her hour of trial, and the
only sure positive and never failing cure and reg
ulator of Suppression of nature from whatever
cause SO mild that the feblest can take them
with perfect security. yet powerful in their ef-
fects, that they may be safely called, never fail
ing Regulator. s.s.-,.
In all cases Of Nervous and Spinal Affections,
Pains in the Back and Limbs, fatigue on slight
exertion, Palpitation of the Heart, Histories, and
Whites, these Pills will effect cure when all 9TH
er means have failed ; and although a powerful
remedy, do not contain iron, calome antmony, or
ANYTHING hurtful to the constitution.
Full directions in the pamphlet around each
package, which should be carefully preserved
SOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS.
Sole General Agent for the United States and
British Dominions,
JOB MOSES, 81 Cortand-st., New York.
N. B-Sl 90 and 6 three cent postage stamps
enclosed to any authorized Agent, will ensure q
bottle, containing 90 Pills. by return mail, secure
ly sealed from all observation 6m
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
Teacher Wanted.

A SSlSTANT Teacher wanted to take
" charge Of the Departments ofIanguag-
es and Mathematics. Address Elder Isaac
Reed, Ozark, .lrk, april Is.
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
Van Buren, Ferry.

YNHE old, long established and wel-known
/ Ferry. at Van Buren,. Ark, is now in the
exclusive charge and control Of the under
signed, who has had charge of it for many
years. He has recently put in service NEW
BOAT. built by him expressly for this Ferry,
and employed careful, experienced and COM
petent ferrymen. Travellers are assured that
at this Ferry they will have safe crossing
over the Arkansas River, and will meet with
no detention.
....f WIN. f. ENGLAND.
NAN BUREN, April DIST 1860,
The Van Buren press., 1866-06-09
.LF NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
The Great French Remedy.

DR. JUAN DELLMARRE'S
CELEBRATED SPECIFIC PILLS,
Prepared from prescription Of Of Dr. Jmn Della
mare. Chief Physician 10 thc Hospital du
Norde ou lariboisicre Of Paris
This invaluable medicine is no imposition, but
uniailing in the cure OF Spermatorrhac or seminal
Weakness Every species of Genital or Unlary
irritabihty involuntary on nightly seminal Ennis
sons from whatever cause produced. or however
severe, will be speedily relieved and the organs
restored to healthy action.
Read the following opinions Of eminent French
physicians
We have used the Specific Pills prepared by
Garanciere d Dupont No pa Rue Lombard, from
the prescription of DR.. Juan Delamare, in our
private practice with uniform success, and we be.
1eve there is no other medicine so well calculated
to cure all persons suffering from involuntary
Emissions or any other weakness Of the sexual or
gans, whether caused by a sedentary mode OF lv-
ing, excesses, or abuse
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

which may a IN g s. los q The EzDre.,
and. Telegraph Club in the distrihniion
ieomst nei1k6 ke lst.dAy % 0ctob1 tAkkt, b,
fthe Crosby Opers House Association.
The object u to have The Express anl
Telegraph Club, bold % lar4c ssrpsul,sr Of
certificates in the Crosby Art Association NJ
shall materially increase the probability o.
CASE the Club becomes Joint stock company
in which sseEyQw66pste pupehssed by th'
Club would be represented, or its members
might vote to dispose OF It again either BY
let amongst themselves or u public auction
together with any other prizss which shall
have accrued to the Club. pg ~ lif04t
No one will be admitted to the Club Whose
subscription shall not have come to the hant
Of the Treasurer, o. Barrett Agent Of th,
American Express Office in Chicago, prior to
the Goth day of September next. fNaf'p
Be careful 10 have your remittance duly
Tway-billed at tb q a4presa efiee !. bat send i
free of charges, = ns the club cannot incur
any expense either for freight or commits
sion. lnclosed, also, sond 10 cents for tub
ing your engraving. #s1
Until YOU shall have received the Club cer-
tificate, the express way bill from your To-
cality will show that you have made tbs
payment requisite IA membership \.
esa we have evsf reason to believe tlA. the
grand distribution of prizes BY the Crosby
Opera House Art Association will be con-
Quoted with entire good faith and faishsss,
but we pean to- be personally satisfied by
being present 70 lsak after the interests Of
our Glib. r
/ Immediately after the drawing, the mem
beIs Of the Expyess and Telegraph Club will
be inforusd u SstEsult, nd notified q !
meeting 10 take, action in the HstaE, The
absent hsabsrslmass vote by psof5 q "
Every express, and telegraph Office VIII
be supplied with programmes AMI blank
forms of. application. Inquiries Cor. iniorma-
zion may Be addressed to the Corresponding
Secretaries, viz; II. j.. Colyin, United States
Express Office, Chicago; John r. Floyd,
Amer can Express office, Chicago, and X. @
Rankin, Agent Western Union Telegraph
Company, Chicago
4 AT fefhittanees Of money for membership
must he sent by express, duly way-biled,
addressed to M. o. W. Barrett, American
Express Office, Treasurer of the Express and
Telegraph Club, or TO either Of the Cores
pondiig Secretaries, as per form furnished
herewith. ......s. ..-q
Ii. u. Colvin, Agent United States Ex-
press Company, President; o. w. Barrett,
Agent American Express Company, Treas
urer.
Corresponding Secretaries g. Rankin,
Western Union Telegraph Company, Ohica-
go Horatio J. Colyin, Uuited States Express
Office, John 4. Floyd, American Express
Company and eennecting lines.
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28


SAD SIGHr.-The other day when pass.
ing down Clark street, our attention was al
rected TO the antics 81 half witted speci
men Of humanity. clad as the world terms
it in beggarly, gcnteel manner. His
sunken eyes and bloated countenance told
too plainly the reason Of his fall-for fallen
he had-fallen too from occupying the
position Of an influential, respected citizen,
to that of a miserable, loathsome drunkard.
As we looked, we could not help contrasting
his present with his past position compar-
ing what he had been with what he is.
Hereawas q man Of more than ordinary
ability, who once had future which many
envied, too many perhaps for his own good.
Now what is he? A mere buffoon for a
parcel of loafers; a slave to a depraved
appetite, an appetite which robs him of bis
manhood, grasses every particle Of self re-
spect and is fast drawing him to q drunken
pauper's grave. Az we looked and ponder
ed we came to one conclusion, and it is this.
that be who tastes, touches or handles not
the soul damning beverage is the only man
whom we would trust in any position Of
responsibility. IL the truth were known
how many are there in the city Of Chicago
who owes their downfall to the same
agency.
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

PREcOcIoUs RAsCALs.-Patrick Wallace
and Lawrence Beatty, both under eight
years Of age, have been arrested for stealing
They had purloined from different drawers
Of small dealers to the amount of one hun.
dred coppers, and were applying the same
to the purchase Of soda-w water, ice cream and
other Injuries Of lie hot season, when they
saw&if not stars-at least one star, which
was amply sufficient to call gently to then
memories, that hey were not treading the
path Of rectitude
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

FOREIGN VEssEIs.-There are at present
two foreign vessels in the river. One is the
schooner Saranac, Capt Wright, which
sailed Con. London the End Of MayIa
She was loaded with chalk, whiting, and
coal The other is the brig yidar, from
Norway. She vas detained Ia the st. Law
renee some time on account of the Fenian
troubles, and has been, consequently, a long
time III der way. She had cargo Of Nor
wegian behring's. Capt Nelson is in COM
mand Of he craft.
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

We hope those Of our country subscribers
who are ~ arrears win promptly REM ,whAt
they owe, as it is our intention at thc com
mencement Of our third volume, to d seon-
t'nue sending the ADVOCATE to ersya sub
sc,tber who has not paid, IN advance.
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

A GOLDEN WEDDING.-Jacob and Ger
trude Simon celebrated the fftieth anniyer-
sary OF their marriage, in the Turner Hall
surrounded by children and troops of grand
children. Fifty years Of married life
This venerable couple will noiselessly pass
along the pathway Of life, and their de-
clining years will be spent in the grateful
roeol'eetions OF duties performed and lives
well spent.
The workingman's advocate. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1864-1877, 1866-07-28

Mr. q. G. HARRIS IS authorized to solicit
subscriptions for the ADvocAFE through the
State Of Wisconsin Any monies paid to
him will be duly acknowledged.