The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-02-08
For The Je6ersonian.
Mr. WHACKHAMMER'S LECTURES.
NO. VII.
HOBByISM.
Whatever hobby you may stride
Let Judgment hold the rein,
If reason be not chosen guide,
The chase will be in vain.

to have hobby, and that he has every
variety of these objects and is competen
to point out and mount world for /;
worlds success. don't know that ht
has done this same world very much O
good or of harm, but | do know that with
ont this same Fowler's assistance almost
every one does find hobby and he helps
himself on-free of xpense-cracks his
whip and generally outruns Wisdom
Judgment and Reason until he finds him
self sprawling in the stagnant pool OF
selfconceit. These are the comedies"
people We so often meet. You might as
we'll undertake with jack knife to cut a
notch through the Rocky Mountains, for
the Pacific Railroad, as to convince such
people of their error. The very thing
they assume to know every thing about
is the very thing they know nothing about,
and the poor creatures never will. This
is the class that is dragging behind the
Esprit Of the age" and who would cut
loose if the ''force of circumstances"
would permit. OF this sort also was that
class Of Northern men with Southern
principles who helped on the Great Re
bellion all they know how with their one
idea, and who had, in reality, no princi-
pie at all. Theishobby has its legs all
knocked off no. and the poor dupes are
foundering in most horrible mud hole,
with their mouths so crammed with dirt
and their eyes so burnt with their DEM
ocracy that they can't tell a negro from
Breckenridge man. They have been eat
ing dirt and throwing dirt for the last
twenty years and now dirt has overcome
them. They are petrifed in dirt and we
will leave them there, though we expect
better things of their children. Mrs
Whack hammer thinks the infection will
stick to the children at least seven years
after they rubbed against their parents,
as it requires that time for nature to re-
place the PARTICLES Of human body with
an entire new set Perhaps she is right,
she often has been. As great many
grown-up men have horse e-hobbies
thought l might as we'll get my two year
old boy hobby horse and see how it I
would do to reverse the thing and espe-
cially to see if this course would prevent
him from getting hold, eventually, of the
other end of the horns of the dilemma
If this precaution prevents. him from fall
ing in love with horse instead of a wo-
man my object will be attained, and it
may stand as PRECEDENT to other parents
who would have their sons grow up not
afflicted with the horse-mania. A fast
young man, with fast horse, is pretty
sure to find fast woman, and then we
see fast team that will very soon over,
take disgrace, ruin and infamy. l never
expect to see any good coming from
horse hobby, although it is said there are
clergymen in New York city who exhib-
it this taste.
Some months ago man sent to Europe
and got meerschaum pipe, for which he
paid fifty dollars. He is riding that hob
by yet. When he first got it he smoked
half the time himself, and his friends the
other half, as he was anxious to improve
the color. Whilst this coloring process
was going on, pipe-ology was the one alb
sorbing topic of conversation, and the vol
ume is not completed. Missionary peo-
pie might call this idolatory it did re-
mind me of domestic gods. Sometimes
the hobby is of the canine specie, and a
tan terrier is advertised as gone, with
fifty dollar reward sent after him, and the
poor berieved owner forgets all care for
wife and children whilst he talks dog,
hunts dog, dreams dog, and would fain
exchange sleeping apartments with dog,
if thereby he could see the unfeeling dog
coming penitently back. The ladies seem
to have relinguished this sort of hobby, /
of late, to the masculine side of the house;
the reason | do not fully understand, but
presume it is because Fashion demands a
service now days that is strictly perso-
nal-that is to devote her whole time to
transforming herself into something just
as different from nature as possible. In
this think she has succeeded. Eve
succeeded with her improvements too. |
don't know that any very great blessing
has followed in either case. In fact |