Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1866-11-08

An angry man is fearful sight, but
can't begin to compare with an angry wo-
man. And this one was raging. She
brandished her parasol in one hand and
her reticule in the other.
you've stole my portemonnaie cried
she. you've took the avantage OF an In
nocent, unprotected female, and played the
part of pick-pooket! I've read about such
as you in the BungOiWe Gazette! ! L might
have kuowed you was one !! I've heern say
they allus have red noses III have you ar-
rested on the spot! Conductor! here !!
here ! This white eyed rascal has got my
portemonnaie and Joe's minnerature, and
be hugged me and he's got my pocket
Handkerchief and all the turnovers that
marin put in for dinner, and my pockets
clean gone! Oh, dear! dearl 1 wish I'd
staid at home!
Don't believe a word she says 7 cried
Joshua, She's lying! She's the one that's
been a stealing! She picked my pocket of
everything but fathers watch and six
cent plug of tobacco! Somebody search
herr Dear Suz I'm ashamed of myself !!
I was so sarting could cut my own fodder,
and look out my P's and Q's! How do
wish marin was here! She'd know just
what to do! I'll see if I can't do some
thing = and Joshua began to climb over the
back of the seat into the aisle.
The girl seized him by the coat tails.
mo you don'tp screamed she, mot by a
long chalk! You think you're gwine to
get off with my things, do YEP I'll let ys
know to the contrary! You'll wish your
cake dough, if you don't deliver up them
portemonnaie and minnerature /! Stop him
the, some one of you! He's gwine to jump
off the keers with my valerables! And I'll
die if he shall I'll go myself! Conduc.
tor he's got Joe's minnerature that cost
nine shillings with his hair frizzed and his
ruffled linen bosomed shirt on to him l
say, stop him!
By this time the whole car full of pas
sengers were aroused to the condition of
things, and as is natural in such cases, there
was division of opinion. Some took sides
with Joshua, and some with the lady.
An elderly woman in spectaclcs-evi-
IDENTIFY one of the strong minded species,
planted her back firmly against the door,
efectually barring the egress.
Joshua's senses began to be slightly mud
died. A half score of people we're heading
him off, and that terrible young lady in
pink dress was clinging to his coat skirts,
and bis pocket-book was gone. He felt des.
perate
Stand aside, every one of you ! be cried
to the people before him and just then the
cars gave lunge, as cars are in the habit
of doing, and Joshua went head first against
the stomach of fat woman who had risen
to see what the matter was.
The woman went over, Joshua went
over, so did the young lady in pink, and
the whole crowd fell on the seat where
very loving couple and lap dog we're re-
posing.
The seat was squelched, so were the lov-
ers and the dog, and the cry rose fast and
furious
"A collision! There is collision !
Everybody spraug to their feetand seized
their carpet bags, and the comedy might
have become tragedy, if the conductor
had not just then appeared and restored or
der.
He shook Joshua, and ordered the young
lady to sit down and behave herself
Joshua took off his hat to scratch his
head, and 10! out dropped the missing
pocketbook Our hero flung up both hands
in ecstacy
sHooray cried he 'it's found Hail
Columby! E Pluribus Union Three
cheers for the Constitution and the Un-
ionv
And they were given with will.
And about the same time the conductor
picken up nondescript looking bag from
the floor. The young lady in pink rushed
forward and seized it.
My pocket my pocket! 1t must have
united and slipped off! Oh. hain't I hap
py! And Joe's minnerature all safep
sLet's shake handsp said Joshua ap-
preaching her. Il haint pickpocket and
you haiut pickpocket; and by golly, I'll
have a kiss on it.
And be did.