Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1866-06-15
NO. 24.
correspondence of The Phenix.

Mr.. EDIToR:-I see in a late number of
the PHGNTX that Uncle Jacob has taken
up his pen again, and is advising the girls
on his favorite topic-matrimony When
he was writing to his daughter, some months
since, on the best method of securing and
retaining good influence over her husband.
1 was hoping that excellent wife of his. of
whom he makes honorable mention, would
give some advice to her son on the best
method of securing and retaining good in
huence over his wife; but, if had reflected
moment, ! might have known she never
would have found time to do such thing.
Such a housekecper as she is-cooking
meat in such a variety of ways, making such
pies, and above all such bread, and that too
without any shortening; one would suppose
man might live upon that alone, notwith-
standing the declaration of Scripture to the
contrary. No, of course she could not write
to her married boy; and if she did not in
struct him by word Of mouth, while she was
/ doing her housework, am afraid he wont
know how to treat his wife, so Sister Low
ington, III write few hints to my married
/ boys, and if you like them you can send
them to your soh
But, before begin, let me ask you if you
don't get dreadful tired keeping your house.
work all done up so nice? for suppose YOU
have to hang up Esq. Lovngton's hat and
coat, and pick up things after him a great
deal Don't you have to sit up real late. to
get the stockings all mended, and the but
tons sewed on to your husbands pants and
vest so they will he ready for him in the
morning? l should think you would: and
| think women generally have a real hard
time of it. l always thought that boy took
sensible, though not very spiritual view
of things, who told the minister he didn't
want to be "born again" for fear he should
come gal"
But was going to give little motherlX
advice to ,,,,. -.~,Iy nlalileu Doy. I will
take it for granted, my dear son, that you
have done up your courting in the most ap-
proved style, and told your loving bride all
sorts of pretty things, and now it remains
for you to fulfil your promises, for they were
sacred promises, although estingly You may
call them ''courting talk" If you told your
wife she should not perform the drudgery of
the family, and should be provided with suit
able assistance, then get it for her, and don't
let her 90 sweating around in hot day to
get your dinner ready, and a thousand other
things too numerous to mention. If she
married you with the understanding that
she was to be mad-of-all-work, then it is all
right: but if she did not. then it is all wrong,
and she has reason to doubt your sincerity
if You leave her to serve alone. You mar
ried your wife for companion, as well as
helpmeet, so don't let her use up all her
; strength and energy in the kitchen over the
cookng-stove. If she does, she will not
long be the beautiful wife of whom you are
now so proud; but she will pine and shrivel,
: in soul and body, before you are aware of
it, Then again. consult your wife's taste
about home affairs Don't let her feel that
she is tied to a man to whom she must al
ways sacrifice her inclination. To be sure,
in all well regulated families the husband is
the head; yet no man who is not tyrant
will continually keep that fact prominent. l
t. have seen a woman who, when asked ques-
! ton, would turn her eye instinctively tow
ard her lord and master, not daring to an
: swer without look of approval from him.
How pitied the poor, fettered woman; and
: how l despised the brute in boots and
brecches. How her heart must have been
crushed and every noble aspiration destroy
: ed, before that scared, meeching look could
have been so indelbly stamped upon her
face.
{ If remember right, Mr.. Lovington ad-
vised his daughter never to ask favors of
her husband unless he happened to be good
- natured. was not tired, hungry, or any way
! out of fr. But | hope, my son, that you
will anticipate the wants of your wife to
=, such degree, that it will not often be neg
u essary for her to ask favors. Get her new
J dress, a pair of gloves and shoes, pretty
4 Il, 10,
L asking. A woman don't want to be obliged
II to ask for everything she needs, like little
child and it is Il great deal more gentle
} manly, and doing as you would be done by,
to give your wife some money and let her
Is spend it herself, than for you to be trotting
y round buying paper of needles, some hair
II pins. and the various little ct cetera which a
woman needs. Let her feel that you have
o confidence in her Judgment and depend upon
1t it, she will not betray your trust Should you
sometimes fail to keep her wants supplied,
: and she should ask you for some money,
= don't for PHYS sake ask her what she is
II going to do with it? She'll not gamble il
- away, nor buy cigars, or a whiskey punch
or gin cocktail with it. Ten chances to one
a she's working you beautiful pair of slip
. pers for birthday present, and wants to
get some more worsted-Women most al
ways do.
lncfe Is one more lulllS W III just touCl
y upon: Always treat her parents and friends
II that she loves with kindness and respect
n Remember your wife left Il cheerful, happy
IL home for YOU She loves those who have
been so kind to her, so do not rudely snaT
II those cords of affection. Propose visit tC
," her parents occasionally, remembering tha'
they bestowed upon you a great treasure o
W which you will not wholly deprive them.
has been great change for her to stay alone
u day after day, when she has been accustom
ed to the society of her mother, brothers ano
10 sisters. With all her love for you, it is inn
n possible for her not TO turn.a longing eye
occasionally towards those loving friends
Dr she has left for you. In short, treat YOU
" wife tenderly, respect her feelings ana never
D. sneak disparagngly of those she loves.
Us Once again: Don't be forever telling hel
what n good cook your mother is, and you
C. wish YOU had something as good as she usec
v, 70 make. Did not you know that every
nd body's mother was a good cook; and thai
every boy is blessed with good Appetite
that is the reason things used to taste 81
o. good. ,
in | meant, when l commenced, TO have mad
no some comments on Uncle Jacobs advice t,
~ his niece. but my paper is full, so | will clos
IL with the following conundrum:
~ Why is an industrious wife like the evi
no one?
to (Do you give it upO
to Why because she sews tears (tares) Will
n the husband-man sleeps.
ttttn