The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-11-30
sMisfellauenns.
NICE LITTLE CHILDREN.

n the first born Of Egypt were lively
children, with a tendency to ask questions
I look upon Herod as bensvolently wise
man. whose acts have been misconstrued'
anil whose memory has been vilihed' a
vast amount Of nonsensical interogatives,
which would have bothered the psfriarchs,
and perhaps stopped the wheels Of that pa
rental style Of government, he spared Thai
generation.
The other day, in an ungiarded moment
! accepted he charge and custody OF a
young gentleman who wore half CATERS
and a Charles II. hat and feather. Ills
sponsors in baptism had given him one
name circumstances another. His latter
appella,;on, aBuster.' His age, as he in
formed me, was '.gong on a." When he
made up his mind that we were going to he
lcl, together, he eyed mo malevolen,ly a
moment, and Immediately commenced the
following system Of torture.
What was my name and my brothers
and my fathers name, and why' Did !
have any little boy.' Why didn't have
any little boys? What was the reason, if ]
didn't any little boys, didn't have any
little grls' All this put rs one question.
with no stops, aud gradual rising inflee-
ton.
Was them buttons gold, in my sleeve,
and why? How much did they cos,f Did
they cost one hundred finy.fye dollars! II
they didn't cost one hundred and fiiiy-fye
dollars, what would be the price Of gold
house with gold furniture and gold stair
case? Did I ever see house with these
auriisrous peculiarities?
No. ..--
wi at then would I've the cost OF silver
carriage and gold harness? What then
would be the cost Of aleaden carriage with
iron harness? And why?
Did ! know why the flee walked on the
ceiling? Could ! walk on the ceiling!
No, il I had one man to hold my head aud
another my legsH Why couldn't Il Could
lii was gianti Did ever see giant
Was personally acquainted with any'
Dill ever see them eat?
How Car was il toNew York; Was II a
million Of miles Fifty million Of miles :
II he (,,us,er) had balloon, and should
start of. could he &c, there tonight? Nor
ncS, night, nor another night. nor next
week and war?
so"n found that this WIZ was simple
form Of closing all questions, like the usual
note of Interrogation.
What was my business, and did I know
any stories and wnr.
This afforded plan Of relief. ] Instant
" started into history Of my previous life
aud adventures. / invested all my relations
anil friends with supernatural attributes.
AMI made myself creation something be-
tween Gcnie and Robinson Crlsoe. l
made the most astonishing voyages and
saw rnost remarkable occurrences drew
literally from The Arabian Nights and Bsr'
on Munchausen. Whenever | saw the
open mouth address itself to motion, as
though 'twould speak" brought in Roc
ora Genie or casket Of diamonds, and
took away the unhappy child's breath :
In the mids, OF an animated description OF
NV las, voyage to the iloarhound Islands,
adventures in the damp caves, where the
candles hung in long stalactites, the parents
happily returned. hurriedly received
their thanks and leh. But ! have the Sc
crct satisfaction OF knowing that NIL that
prn,.up torrent Of questions hurs, upon the
unhappy father; and that geographical in
quiries regarding the locality OF Floating
Island" the "Bianc Mango Archipelago"
and the ''valley Of Cream Cakes will be
his dreadful lot to meet and answer.