Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1866-03-01
From the Washington Star.
Remarkable Adventures of "a
Corpse.

NOb tOuR SluCC IL IldtlNC VI CllC LLuSIdlu
Isle, one of the victims of the late arsenal
explosion, died in this city, and Immediately
preparations were made to give him O. nice,
genteel funeral. 1t was at first arranged
that he should be buried here, but some of
his kindred being buried at Parkersburg,
West Virginia, it was finally determined that
what remained of poor Johnny M--should
be sent to that place. Accordingly, after
awake" Zone of the good old SORT, the re-
mains were accompanied by his sorrowing
friends and relatives to the depot, to take
the cars for the place of burial. The funer-
al procession arrived at the depot some time
before the departure of the train in which
the remains were to go, and the mourners
spent the intervening time in assuaging
their sorrows at the neighboring bars, so
abundant in that vicinity, the corpse mean
while remaining on the platform ready to be
placed on the 8 P. NJ. train which would
connect at the Relay House with the west
ern train.
The party meanwhile drank SO many liba-
tions.. to the memory of the departed that
they returned to the station in very mel
low condition, and the railroad officers being
apprehensive that they would be incapable
of taking care of the corpse, telegraphed to
the agent at the Relay to see that the corpse
was taken off at that point Shortly before
the time of starting the corpse was placed
on the train, and an attempt was made to
muster the mourners when 1t was ascertain
ed that one or two had become SO obfusti-
Gated as to have taken the New fork train.
The rest of the party, however, managed to
get aboard, and ere long Johnny Ms
body was again marching on" AT the
Relay the corpse was transferred to the
western train, but two or three of the
mourners were too far gone to get out in
time, and so proceeded to Baltimore, while
the balance Of the party with the corpse
was hurried on with extra speed westward.
At the points along the road where the
engine stopped "to WATER" the mourners
as invariable stopped "to wet" and not be-
ing up to time, quite as invariably brace
or more were left behind at each watering
and wetting place and by the time Grafton
was reached, where the corpse was to change
cars for Parkersburg, but few of the mourn
ers remained with it, and these were so be-
wildered that they failed to get in the pro-
per train, and Johnny's corpse went on to
Wheeling without them. From thence, by
some means, it was sent to Columbus, Ohio,
the corpse thus having got into the wrong
Otutc, anu the HOllfHeTS DeluS SCdItcfeu
through Maryland and West Virginia. and
along the line of the Baltimore, Wilmington
and Philadelphia and Camden and Amboy
Railroads. By this time the telegraph was
put into excited operation, and various mes
sages were whisked over the wires in vari-
Gus directions in regard to the missing
corpse and scattered mourners, making con-
fusion doubly confunded for awhile.
From Grafton an anxious mourner in
quired, "Where in the ID is the corpse 2"
This dispatch was crossed on the road by o
loud inquiry from Columbus as to the own
ership of stray corpse arrived there I'M
consigned. A Baltimore scattered mourner
telegraphed to s'postpone the funeral till
get there's" and the squad of mourners by
the New York train were sending wildly
confused messages to Parkersburg, Relay
House, Grafton, and Washington, all helping
to intensity the prevailing muddle. The
corpse. meantime, had resumed it's travels,
and, like poor Joe, not being wanted in any
locality, had been kept moving on, until it
arrived at Little Miami depot, where it Gre
atgd no little excitement, being without any
mark for Identification, and foul play being
at once suspected. coroner's inquest was
held without throwing any light upon the
mystery, which was, however, cleared up
by a telegraphic despatch for the missing
corpse. The railway officials then got the
corpse in motion eastward, and the mourn
ers headed westward, and finally, after the
most eventful history of any corpse or set Of
mourners on record, Johnny's body was
duly committed by them to mother earth,
where we trust it may rest in peace