The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1866-08-21

,
$4,000 pounds weight country produee"-mean- |
ing tobacco. .
But altsi your poor Type prints no figure like
nuiko; .s
Cursed. cheated abused by each pitiful fellow
Though working like slave, with zeal and true
courage,
He can scarce get as yet even salt to his porridgeP
He was, however, able to continue his paper, as
two octave volumes of extracts from IL were
published in London.
have not much improved. The unfortunate
editor of an Indiana journal thus addresses his
delinquent subscribers:-
"BARD UP.-It is but seldom we trouble our
patrons by asking them TO tork over the sma bal
apce due us; but we think II they only knew how
difficult task Il is Tor us 60 MAKE provisions to pro-
tect sally and the hidren from the cold chi ling
blasts of winter that is new coming upon us like an
avalanche. 1t would hardly be neces airy 20 say pay
more than once, Tor they would come to our rescue
instanter."
zone more unfortunater in Kentucky speaks
to his patrons in these touching Words
"Friends, we are almost penniless-Job's turkey
sont depressed treasury To-day II the price OF salt
was two cents a barrel, we couldn't buy enough to
pickle a jay bird"
Another appeals thus to the sympathies of his
readers:-
1--WE cannot help thinking how much easier an
editors lie might be made # his generous patrons
could ony hear his better half scrapiD the bottom
OF the four-baIrell man that write editorials
walk the telegraph wires and turn summersauts in
the branches of thorn-eush"
Another writes on the subject more philo-
sophically, but not the less points his moral:-
every ought to pay his debts, if he can.
Every man ought to get married, if he can. Every
man should do his work to suit mis- customers If he
can. Every wife should sometimes hold her tongue
if she can. Every lawyer should OCCASIONALLY tell
the truth, If he can. Every man ought TO mind his
own business, and let othor peoples alone, IT he
can. Every man should take a newspaper and pay
for it ANY How"
The Louisville Times has fair take Off on
the expression Gin a few days." too commonly
used by poor debtors, and applies it to serve a
good purpose. He who cannot see its wit is to
be pited:-
You present a man a small account he will pay
you I'm a few days. pretty girls expect to marry
lin few days. we expect to give readers some
interesting local news in few days. And we are
hoping that great many OF our subscribers will
send the amount of their dues in few days. In
fact, we know they will, for some OF them have
been promising to do that little hing every few
days for year or two We expect them to be in
funds in few days."
The following 'dun" of poetical stripe is
worthy of preservation in these columns, il
only as good parody on the popular song
Then you'll remember me-" in Balfe's opera
entitled the Bohemian Girl:-
"When other bills and other duns
1heIr tale of woe shall tell,
OF notes in bank, without the funds
And cotton hard TO sell;
There may, perhaps, In such O scene,
Some recollection be
OF bills that longer due have been, .
And you'll remember me!
NV non nara up customers shall wiring
Your hearts with hopes VAN,
And deem 1t ut trltilng thing
To tell you call again.
When calling proves useless task,
without the LAWYERS tee,
In such moment but ask
That you'll remember mel"
Two other representative instances of the
poverty OF this class may yet be given. The first
ls that OF Western editor who lately called his
| "devir' to him, and told him that he could not
afford to hire his services any longer unless he
would althpr q Or
them, or share equally the profits OF his paper.
The boy concluded to stay, but unhesitatingly
| chose the nanepence a icGek for his wages
The other is OF a more melancholy character,
| and refers to New Hampshire editor who, while
| recently travelling, had his wallet distracted
| from his pocket by some adroit thief. The pick
| exploit that ne returned the plunder by express
to the address written inside the wallet with the
| following note:-
"You miserable skunk, hears yure pocket-book
| Fur man dressed as well as you was to go round
| with weliit with nuthin in 1t but lot OF
| papur scraps, ivory tuthecom too noospapur
| stamps, and pas from O ralerO1e drectur is
| tempturbnl impursition on the public As 1 hear
yure uddtur L return yure trash. 1 never robs
| any only gentlemen"
| The editor of the Alabama Argus, published
| at Demopolis seems to have been thoroughly
| imbued with the spirit OF Mark Tapley," when,
after the following fashion, he showed himself
Jolly" under what most people would consider
| serious circumstance
1--WE see that the sheriff during our absence, has
advertised the argus for sale. We hope the bidders
have merry time of II If the sheriff can sell IL ne
Will DO more than we ever could. Like damp per-
| cusslon-cap, we think il will fail to go OFF,"
But, verify, we must have fallen on the 'last
days. in which st. Peter declared that "scoffers'
| should come. For are not these men scohers of
| poverty? And not only of poverty, but also of
| riches; Tor should once an editor become for
tuitously wealthy, he is regarded as a Tdra duis,
| and his name emblazoned in full caps in every
PAPER in the country. Read how the editor of
| the Horizon lWisconsin) Argus discourses:
can exchange says that editors are, as genera.
| thing, not everstOeked with worldly goods huml
! bug! bere are We editor OF q country paper fairly
rolling in wealth. We have good office, O double
barrelled rifle, seven suits clothes, three kittens
| Newfoundland pup, two gold watches, tn rteen day
and two night shirts, carpets our floor, a pretty
wife, own one corner lot, have nnetythree cents in
cash, are out OF debt, and have rich relatives, If
we are not wealthy II is pity"
| Here now is a small batch which reminds one
OF an editor who wrote his editorials on the soles
| OF his bosts and went barefoot while his boy set
| up the manuscript-so making himself rich by
| saving paper;-
| "There is a Iich editor in New Hampshire who has
made his money by always practising economy. He
| always writes his editorials on a slate. ."-hGU.
| There IS another who saves the expense of his
slate and Steals his editorials from us"-COncord
| Recorder.
"But you don't mean to say that he gets rich of
such stealingsg Should think he staTVe Tor want OF
| subscribers s."-HdH.
| what rumpus a rich editor always does kick
| up" spiteiuly adds Western contemporary.
| Alas, alas it is that so many of these
| creators and conservators of public opinion are
| doomed to travel in the walks OF poverty and
| that while so few of them are bred to the pro-
| tession in the majority OF cases the business is
| not bred to the editor. Hence. many burning
| and shining hight of literature is obscured by
| the Withdrawal of editors to private life. The
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