The Vermont transcript. [volume] (St. Albans, Vt.) 1864-1870, 1866-12-07
CoNlEpmr y ROADS,
witch is i'll the Stait NV kentuky
November, 13. 1866.

ana to-Wuns sunk INTO SlumDcr But
it was not peaceful sleep on the
contrary, quite the reverse. he'd
nitemare and troubled visions, and
FINALLY settled down into dreams
which were highly mixed.
Mcthought I was onto an immense
race course, NV wich the quarter-posts
wuz marked with the names nv the
various States, and there wuz to be n
race atwcen two giants, which ]
learned was Dimocrisy and Union,
the stake for which they were contest.
in bcin the control of the country for
the next two years.
FL entered the gate, they were
bringing out the contestants and pre-
parn ue en- for the trial he'd a good
view NV EN-. Union wuz led ont by
Trumbull and Colfax, and splendid
specimen he wuz The pictor of
health, built for speed and endoor-
ance, without II ounce of sooperhuous
flesh onto him, and hiz step wuz as
free aud elastic ez a girls us TO- wich,
permit me to state, is the perfection
NV motion. He needed but little prep
aration. Trumbull twitched off hiz
shoulders Wendell Phillips, who in
sisted upon ridin, but cut oft bottom
of his right foot corn marked Con-
seryatism, witch famed him somewhat,
and strappin the weight onto him
wich he wuz to carry, "Ekal Rights,
witch really instead NV bein an in ,um-
brance, ez sum NV hiz hackers spected,
added to the symetry NV biz form, lie
wuz reddy for the race.
Imejetly methought Dimocrisy wuz
brought out. He wuz nv ekal size,
but there wuz difference atwecn EN-,
His face was fluffy and bloated, he
stood shaky on his pins. and wuz SO
enveloped i'll wrappers NV various col
ors, and so loaded down with packs
and weights, that his original shape
coodent be determined.
Johnson and Seward appeared tc
be biz principal hackers, though Val
landigham and the Woods he'd hin
Immediately in charge. Ez soon e,
he come shambling up the prepare
ton ground. Seward exclaimed
"Good Hevens, he can't run carlyir
this weight" and he stripped off NJ
immense pack labelled "Copperhead
ism, at which the giant appeared t
breathe easier
Vallandigham who had bin lookil
at him, conclooded that to balance
him properly package witch Doolittl
he'd tied to him, marked "acquies
cence in the results nv the war;" mus
come off, and accordingly it wa
stripped of.
"He will certainly fall with this tie
to him" sed Randall, unwrappin
bandage marked ''Repudiashen
This will weigh him down. sal
Cowan, tryin to pull off a excrescenc
marked "Clymer," but wich he'd stuc
in so deep that he couldent get
OFF.
"Who dashed this to hiz back 4
manded Fernady Wood, untyin
board witch he'd bin tied on benin
onto wich was loyalty" in large Ii
ters.
Il did it, said Randall, :"
strengthen his back, wich is natera
weak"
Take it OFF take it off, sel
leck Stevens and Mayor Munroe, a
it WIZ taken off.
ale must be relieved of this, S,
Dix, n takin off wrapper mark
States Rites
"And this" seq Custer, stlippin
,nother one he found under
marked Southern Sympathy"
The hour for startin he'd arriv
ihc word WIZ given, and afore
hackers NV Democracy knew it he !
Vermont and Maine, and wuz IN
close To Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Il
amy; yet their man wasn't ready. T
wun pulled off wun impeachment, q
tother wun another, until, while
spectators wuz cheerin the tothcr
ant, and who he'd made Ohio, PEI
sylyania, Injeany and Iowa. they '
still strippin him of weights, a
when they all got through, there
stood. an immense skeleton, the DO
ov wich were so loosely hung toget
that they ratified like castanets.
The weight he WIZ to carry, W
wuz immense package marked r
eral Patronage" wuz then brought
and here fresh dispoot arole.
1andigham and Wood insisted that
shouldn't run at all onless it WIZ h
.on tiseir side and Seward and Doc
tie swore like pirates that it must
hung to their side, and while they
.dispootin, Union wuz goin il for ,
life for Moo York and Illinois. Fin
the, compromised by diyidin it
twoparts and hanging it on both 81
and then hastily instructor him to
across lots and make Moo York e
Good, they give him shove He
II few feaole, totter;n steps md fell
the load WIZ too heavy for him to
ry; and his opponent come in amid
cheers Nv the multitude. Jest ez he
breathin his last. sinothered with
weight piled on to him.
The cheers nv the popnlace a,
me, and found myself IN cold S,
and shiverin like nn aspen leaf.
Thought over the dream, wich WI
vivid that remembered every pi