The daily clarion. [volume] (Meridian, Miss.) 1863-1866, 1866-03-24
The DAILY CLARION
TRHRI,Eg.

Mamma, if I'm good, | shall 60 to Heav'
en-, shan't p Yes; love- And who
will be there besides ?" "Angels-dear,
beautiful good angels" "Ah," hesitated
the boy, all angels-all good, beautiful
boys Mamma, dear, do you think if I'm
very good they will let have just one
little devil to play with ?" This is the last
version of an old story.
A cockney, coming out of a gambling
house the other night, said he felt as he had
struck Hoyle.
Bill Triplet, a son of "OId Kentucky, -
many years ago emigrated to Ark ansas, and
lived in a kind of hand-to-mouth sort of a
way, till finally he was reduced to the ex-
tremity of borrowing all the ready cash he
could get hold Of One day he went to
Fred Trapnall-of whom he boosted as an
old friend, and who was whOle-souled fel-
lOw-and asked the loan of ten dollars
Fred was a candidate for the Legislature on
the Wing ticket but Bill was an inveterate
Democrat. When he asked the loan on this
occasion, Fred said, Bill, how does it hap
pen that when you want money you always
come to me, but when I'm a candidate you
are always opposed to me ?" This ought to
have been poser, but Bill was smart.
SAID he: Fred. look at me right good III
tell you Politically I'm opposed to you,
but financially, I'm your friend ~
At the Irish Bar, Moran Mahaffy, ESQ, was
as much above the middle size as Mr. Coils
was below it. When Lord Redesdale was
Lord Chancellor of Ireland, Messrs Mahaffy
and Coils happened to be retained in the
same case a short time after his lordship's
elevation, and before he was acquainted per
sonally with the Irish bar. Mr. Coils was
opening the motion, when Lord r observed
Mr.. Coils when barrister addresses the
Court, he must stand"
Il am standing on the bench, my lord"
said Coils.
Il beg thousand pardons," repIied his
iordshIp, somewhat confused; sit down,
Mr. Mahaffv"
Il am sitting, my lord" was the reply to
the COMPOUNDED Chancellor.
One of the most conscientious Dutcbmen
ever known was porter Ill commission
house in Cincinnati, and sometimes sold
some of the merchandise when the propri-
etors were absent. He was a good salesman
and pretty good Judge of money but in
one Of his sales he took in a very supiciousIv-
looking $ bill, and when the book keener
took 1t to the bank, the bank refused il. and
pronounced It spurious, but said il was All
excellent imitation. The book-keeper re-
turned 1t to the porter, and told him TO re-
TURN IL TO the party of whom he received it,
About week aftcTward, the book keeper.
thinking he had time to see the party IN
get another note, asked the porter if he had
returned the spurious ~
Well he said, dat man vot gave me dat
hliI, he didn't coined around already. and
some days l tinll de bill vas goot. and some
days yot tink it was goot, l passed him
out
A traveller relates an incident which he
witnessed recently while waiting in the cars
near tins city. In front of him was a gen
uemen who INDUCED in rhyming He ask .
ed a young lady sitting near him if She
would like to read his last production. Re /.
plying IA the affirmative. he pulled paDer
from ms pocket and placed it in her hand |
But the lady had scarcely commenced read /
ing "hen the poet exclaimed:
POUNDS, madam, | have given Won the
wrong manuscript. Here is the right one.
ms Is a receipt for the cure of diarThna ~
The Iady's embarrassment and the mirtb
oil the spectators may be more readily i'm
aglned than described
The following is told of a father of the
church AT an association dinner a debare
arose as to the use of the rod in briD0inr mn .
children. The doctor took the affirmative
ana the chief opponent was a Young minis
ter whose reputation for veracity was NOT
nigh. lie maintained that parents often do
harm to their children by unjust punishment
rom not knowing the facts of the case -
Why, said he the only time NV father
whipped me was for telling the truth -
w ell TetOrted the doctor "it cured vo, | !