Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1866-02-06

wood fte after i left the last dch, if it wusnt
that am over so yeres old and hay rumatiz
and is so panifed Mr.. Eddytur, whot pity
it is tha wont let fellur go in the army whot
is oaver so. Sum of the moast ftenest men we
hev is oavur that age, and tina awl hev to sta
owt.
Wei, Mr.. Eddytur, want sum .informashun
as to how things has bene going on sins TUX
non cOnspus nlefat,ts. / want the truthe Has
we gained our Independents yit? When tux
sic the konphederalt Kongress wus trlen Nlr
Habyus Korpess. In his messaig MIR. presy
dent JEFF. davis reckcommendid that Habyus OF
to be hung-suspended as he kold it. u sea
thar air sorter of antagonlsm betwlxt IL.
Korpess and the presydent; the phormur air
the kustodium of sivel liburty; and the lattur
am the kustodium of konscrlps and SO on.
dun noe how the trie vii go havnt heerd of
Habyus much sins the wor kommenst but
hoap Kongres will be kan and mersyful. Iha
sa tha hung old Habyus, the daddy of awl the
Habyeses in the Benited Stats at the beginner
Of this kruel wor. Yes, and forgot anothur
tail that are owt here amung the union trash.
Tha sa that ole Linkum art ded and Andy jon
son am presydent This air yanky sensashun
lie jist to naik the guide suthern peepel glad fur
a while. Parsun Crow sade in his sermont that
Linkem wer abowt as fit fur presydent as hel is
fur a ice-hows, and guide minny peepel thinks
he is thirds rite.
But to go bak to owr Kongres, the kommittey
on the phag and see were laborin sudoriferus-
ly on the phlag, but tina Good not agre as to how
the stripes shood run, whether up and down or
horryzontelly; sincerely hoap tha hev finisht
thare diaforetik labors bi this time, fur it is
mattur of momentus Importers now that We ar
surrounded by a kruel and vindicktiv fow. In
owr military situashun eyry thing wus brite and
britenen as the eddyturs and aWl them that wus
best inphormed told us. The rebbel army of
I,l L, -
robbers frum Savanny to Charlesting, then to
| Willmonton and when TUX sic tha 50 that
Shermon' s army wus run to deth about Rolly
in North kariiny so you sea that army will
i be no moar trubble to US. Gen. Lee had Dir.
grant hemed in betwene the Jeems and appy-
mattocks RIVERS. [ thot the oththoritys Wus
layin won Of the moast jgantickest strateggykal
plots to kotch Grant ever heerd OF. [ wus so
ankshus to see it'kerryed oHt but tux sic
The plan wus to hoald Gen. Lee at Petersburg
andnot let him Civ up richmond as he wanted
to did-and let the hoal yankee nashun gether
rownd him thar under grant; and then the kom
misery general and QuorteT-mastur general wus
to starv Gen. Lee 8 army and let them freeze
for want of close; and then at a given sygnel
from jeff. Davis the naked and hungry rebbels
wus to pitch in amung Grant yanky duch and
skater them to the forewinds of the yearth,
wurse nor passel of army chaplins when
haf Of whar tina is It wus guide idy, Mr.
Eddytur, fur u know when follur Is cold lie
must fite to kepe frum freazin and It's vel noWn
that evry buddy feles Ike ften when tina is hun
gry| fele very pugnashus miself when i KUN
hoam hungry and wood sa sumthin # wusnt
Trade of Betsy and the yard-stick.
Mr.. Eddytur how dyd this grande plan work.
| | am yeri ankshus to noe.
Mr.. Eddytur vii civ mi vues brefely as to
! xrnc Of ba X noca X OF fr,
doc. In the furst plais the kornmitty OF to
phinish the phlag and sele, fur this is Of the
graitest importans Then tha OF to kurtale the
kurrency anothur too-thurds-that maiks three
thurds, OF awl, with the won thurd kurtayled
in 1900 & 63.
Then tha ct to pas law putten, ,cvly buddy
in the army frum 10 to 80 yeres old-Grant the
ole phule kols it Robin the kraddle and GRAVY
either the graiv or penitenshary are robbed in
his kais, fur he deservs to be hung or penitcn-
shunaryed, dun noe which fur maxim Gen.
Lee xii so minny of his yanky duch
wood hev speshal xempshun bill. wood
xempt awl them with rumatlz and aNi othur
panes that kant be seed or phelt by doktar
[ wood xempt awl stait offysers frum Guverner
doun to penitenshary konviks, and all sich as
are in line Of promoshun fur the emty sells, sich
as penitenshary agents. | wood exempt awl in
.iustises Of the pees to talk keer that Nr Ha-
byus Korpus amt hung. | wood xempt awl
scule tecchers and awl which xpeck to tecch at
inny time durin the mex yerea Awl teechers
which hav less than won skollar shall not be en-
tytled to the benephit of this ak | wood
xempt awl preachers as sich, mainly, to Wit
awl sich as ware white table kloths rownd tha
neks fur kravats, and hev blank xp-eshun Of
kowntenans, komanly kold kergikle dignity.-
Awl preechurs whot sels ardent spirits, or kepes
banks, or don't pra fur the Suthern Kon-
phederacy and sa that Providers is on oB-r side;
and sich as hev any uther menes Of support
cept preechun, shal not be entitled to the bene-
phit of this ak. Awl dockturs as sich shall be
xempted, mainly, to wit: awl sich as hav prac-
tist medisen dais, and bledes and pulls tethe.
No shepe scin shall be required cepten the won
tha wair.
Then wood pas generel xempshun bill,
xemptin evry buddy except farmurs and laborin
men. We kin do without farnurs at hoam bet
ter nor inny uther klas, we dons Hede. no sup
plize fur hey pruyed to u that soljers fte bet
ter when tha sir kold and hungry Theas, Mr.
Eddytur is mi vuze about things in general.
Prises fur evry thing wus guide owt here be.
foar tux six. The last thing did befoar tux
six wus to sci bari of flower fur 500 dollurs.-
The farmurs rownd here awl SADIE soald it two
10, tha sade it wood bring 600 dollurs befoar
harvust noe soald it two 10, but don't
think that maid me six soald it two solgers
wife, and we must maik sum sackryfses if We
want to game oWr Independents.
Yapky Graeabaks is srrkulatin here not
withstandin thar is a law of owr kongress pro-
hibiten it, Kalko, kauphy, chooger, whoopd
skurts and all kinds of yankee noshuns is pler-
ty owt here, Sumtimes think smells a mice,
and rekon that England and Frans has razed
the blockcaid. Now, Mr.. Eddytur, mozee,
entrete that u let me here frum u sune, for it
am very onplezzant to be in suspens like i is at
! this time
Iorcs very trewly
til Deth,
ADDUM JOANS.
I. S.-U viii pleeze send on the 'Spectaitur'
to me. | bleeve your subscription prise ere 10
dollurs yere in Konphed [ have kune scin
with the har on which vii fotch me 20 do!lurs
IN konphed in Stanton; vii pa fur the pa
pur and bi hafr pint Of brandy with the uther