The daily phoenix. [volume] (Columbia, S.C.) 1865-1878, 1866-09-01
A Good Thing From Punch.

A Good Thing From Punch.
The Emperor of the French is thus
severely cauterized by P,o,cA. It is
decidedly the latest and best thing
we have seen lately from that source:
A CARD.-Louis Napoleon begs to
inform the emperors and kings of
Europe, and the public generally.
that his business of commission agen-
cy is carried on as heretofore at the
Palace of the Tuileries, where he NAV
be consulted daily, and, if pressing
need be, nightly, and where all conf
dental letters must be sent. Having
few of the ideas which belonged to
his late uncle, l.. n. may be safely
consulted on state subjects, and feels
himself quite competent to give the
best advice. In all matters of dis
pute, his judgment is proverbial; and
beng thoroughly n master of diplo-
matte language, he is able, for his
clients, to prove that white is black.
Besides his advice to kings and en-
perors IN need of it, Louis Napoleon
Is prepared to act for them as umpire
at the very shortest notice, and may
be relied upon for giving decision
quite unbiased by any party interest
ed, except, of course, himself. In
arbitration cases, and quarrels be-
tween friends, L. n. may be called in
without pecuniary fee, provided there
be some little advantage to be gained
by him. His knowledge of geogra-
ply is thoroughly profound, and en-
ables hlm to render an incstimahle
service to any one desirous of correct
ing an Old map. Having had great
experience in the art of land survey
ing, he Is ready to advise as to the
altering Of boundaries and removal
OF all landmarks which may be
thought little obsolete and some
what out of date. T.. n. may, in like
manner, be privately consulted as to
the best means Of upsetting an old
treaty; and his advice may be had
gratis as to changing or removing
any ancient bou,4ds of territory, so
as to increase his own.
Countries bought and sold, or
valued and allotted, rs the empire may
direct. New maps exchanged for old
ones State treaties neatly broken,
and the pieces picked up with the
greatest care. \ few more emperors,
like MaXimilian, always kept on
hand, and ready to be exported at
half moments notice to any nation
wanting them. Cracked crowns ex-
changed, or strengthened and re-
paired. State secrets kept most care
fully. Clever negotiators, such rs
Prince Napoleon, prepared to start
upon important diplomatic missions,
and furnished from headquarters with
the brains they may require. \ pri-
vate telegraph upon the premises to
all the capitals in Europe and an
efficient staff Of clerks, who sit up
day and night
Address Louis Napoleon, European
umpire and commission agent, Paris.
n. B.-No connection with the op-
position firm of Seedle-gun and Bis
mark.
PEnsoSN.-We had the pleasure,
last night, Of meeting Gen. Gcary, of
South Corolina, en- route for home
from q rustication ut the Virginia
Springs. Our friend is the same
genial and dashing spirit rs of yore,
when, at the head of his gal'>nt bri
gade, he bore the reputation OF one of
the first of our Confederate, : .i,.euls.
Entering service as ca, ,in, he
fought up to q brigadier- -gcncralship,
commanding the famous Hampton
Legion, after the promotion Of Gen.
Wade Hampton. its original leader;
and then being specially selected for
picked cavalry brigade. This force
it was, rs will be remembered, which
fired the last gun at Appomattox and
at its head Gen. Geary cut his way
ont Of the Federal lines on the night
of the surrender, dashing through
the Fifth Army Corps and reaching
Greensboro in safety Here his sabre
was put at the disposal of President
Davis, and with the last hope Of the
Confcderacy our bold dragoon re-
manned till the star of our hopes set
III the clouds of irrcmediablc disaster.
Such man, true as the steel of his
sabre, 1T does one good to meet in
these days Of equivocation and cant
! .iug'tStu Cousitttuionu}iSf, 31H
The EMpERoR's HEAIrn. The
Paris correspondent of the Duilo
Necs says: Although there undoubt
edly is an ''Italian difficulty" I be-
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