Abbeville press. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1860-1869, 1866-03-30
BY W. A. LEE AND HUGH WILSON.
BILL ARP ADDRESSES THE LEBANON LAW
SCHOOL AND GIVES his OWN SAD ExPE-

BILL ARP ADDRESSES THE LEBANON LAW
SCHOOL AND GIVES his OWN SAD ExPE-
R1ENCE.
M1LLEDeEv1LLE, Fcby, 1866
Messrs. G. c. Cummings and others, Kon,-
mittee
GENrLEMEN-I have reserved your kind
invitation 10 address your law skool. In
the situation by which I am surrounded it
is impcssibul for me to 60. wish could,
for l wounld like to tell you all I know
about law, and it wouldent take me long.
I'm now in the law bisness myself at this
place. We are engaged in manufakturin
it by wholesale. after while it will be retail
ed out by lawyers to any body that want it,
It's an easy bisness to make law, though some
of the bills introduced are awfu!Iy spelt.
To-day saw bill, in which "mashcenry"
was spelt with two esses and four ease.
But the greatest difficulty is in understand
in the law after it is made. Among law
yers this difficulty don't seem to lie so
much in the head, as in the pocket. For
five dollar a lawyer can luminize some,
and more akkordin to pay. But he
oughent to luminize but one side at a time.
The first case K ever had in a jestice court,
I employed old Bob Liggins, who was
sor..er of self-educated fool. I give him
Two doii:rs in advance, and he argued the
case as thocght, on two sides, and was
more luminous agin me than for me. l
lost the case, and found out afterwards
that the dofendent had employed Lggins
after did, and give him five dollars to lose
my case. look upon this as warnin to
all clints, to pay big fees and keep your
lawyer out Of temptation.
Ny experience lii litigation have not beens
satisfactory. sued Suger Black onst for
the price of load of shuks. He said he
wanted 10 buy some ruffness, and agreed
to bring him load of shuks for too dol
lars. My wagiu git broke and he got tired
a waitin, and sent out after tho shuks his
self. When called on him for pay, he
seemd surprised, and sed it had cost him
too dollars and half to have the shuks
hauld and that jestly owd him a half a
dollar. He was bigger than was, SO I
swsllord my bile and sued him. His law,
yer pied set off for hau!in. lie pied
that the sbuks was unsound that they
were bard by limitations that they
dident gree with his COW, and that he
never got any shuks from me. lie spoke
about an hour, and alooded to me rs r
swindler about As times. The bcdevild jury
went out ond brought in verdiL again me
for fifty cents and four dollars for costs Of
suit. haint saved nary shuk Oh my plan
tation since, and don't intend to until it
gifts less expensive. look upon this as
warnin to all folks, neuer to lav about
ahuks, or any other small circumstance.
The next trouble had wus with fcllet
who hired to dig ma well. lie wus to
dig it for twenty dollars, and wus to pay
him in meat and meal, and sich like. The
vagabond kept gittin along until he got all
the pay, but hadent dug nary foot in the
grown. So made my akkount, and saed
him as follers, 10 wit:
Old John Hanks to Bill Arp. DR..
TO Wei, you dident dig ~. :. $50
Well Hanks, he hired cheap lawyer, who
rard round extensively, and sed heap of
funny things at my expense, and finally dis
missed my case for what he called its "ridi-
kulum absurdam." I paid those costs, and
went hone sadder and a wiser man. I
pulled down my little cabin, and moved it
some 800 yards higher to the spring, and
I've daunk nifty little we'll water since. I
look upon this case as warnin to all folks
neuer to pay for any thing till you've got
IL, espeshiaHy fit has to be dug.
The next law case had 1 gained it all
by aayself by the force of circumstances.
I hougt mans note that was given for
the hire of nigger boy, Dix. Findin he
wouldent pay me, I sued him before old
Squire McGinnis, beleevin it was sich a
dead. thing that the devil couldeut keep me
out of verdik. The feller's attorney plead
failure of consideration, and non est tak,un,
and ignis tatuis, and infancy, and that the
!nigger's name wasens Dix, but Richard
The old squire was powerful seeesb, ant
hated Yankees amazin. So after tos law
yer had got through his speech and finish
ed up his readin from book called screen
leafa Iross forward TO an attitood. Stretch
:asrfesh my :srnaii see !, Squire MeGinnis
I would, ask, sur, If this is time in the bis
tory of onr afiikted country when Fedora
law books should be admitted in South.
erni patriots court2 Haven't we sseceede,
Al. e. 4 a ,