The state rights democrat. [volume] (Albany, Linn County, Oregon) 1865-1900, 1866-08-04
A Moving story.

Yesterday was the first of MAY, and every
body, except those who were so unfortunate
as to own their own houses-thereby being
liable at any time to be sent to State Prison
for taxes-moyed.
We moved.
And it was the movingest sight wO ever
saw.
Our readers ought to have seen the scene
Our folks commenced pulling up and tear.
ing down the traps q week ago.
Most of the "plunder' was thrown into a
heap and Jumped of into loads, with q total
disregard of the ordinary rules.
The paragoric and hive syrup bottles were
packed in our new hat-one of Mackenzie's 3
latest and best.
The castor bottles were placed in our 9TH
1er boots, it being SO handy to carry them by
the loops. The stopper came out of the one
containing tomato catsup, and the top of the
mustard concern was broken off,
That is the best seasoned pair of boots We
ever had.
The other family insisted on coming into
the house before we got out
And so the things got mixed up some.
But we got all that belonged to us at least
The cartman swore because the cook-stove
was so heavy and one said id if he'd
have it if we offered it to him."
Didn't offer it to him, but offered both of
them drink out Of quarter barrel of ale,
nearly full. standing In the kitchen.
They took it very kindly, but it made 'em
very thirsty all the forenoon.
Guess the spigot must have got out of the
barrel on the road, for we couldn't squeeze
half glass out last night.
Finally we moved.
Thought we'd have our supper before we
tackled our bedsteads and back room stove.
Better half, with patch of SCOT on her nose,
and supper was ready.
She was mad, because when she asked US
70 bring home keg of soft soap, we propos-
ed an amendment, substituting keg of
powder and slow match.
We hate soft soap--have to use so much
Of it every day noticing men and things.
Sat down at the table and took cup of
tea that was handed to US.
Thought it tasted strangely, and prospect
ed the bottom Of the cup. Found the brim-
stone ends of three broken matches.
Didn't drink any more tea.
Came near breaking one of our teeth on q
carpet tack In the butter, and thought we'd
had supper enough.
Commenced playing put up bedstesds
It's fun when you ike it.
But people don't like it, mostly.
None of the blasted rails would fit. Got
the wrong ones In the wrong posts, and
couldn't screw them.
Marked them all with pencil before we
took them down, and thought we'd know
how they went together again but some.
body wiped the marks all out.
And there they were.
Better-half suggested that one at our
time Of life ought to have more patience, and
gave it as her opinion that we couldn't swear
the headsfones together
Found we couldn't
Finally got 'em up-four of 'em-and
commenced putting the cords on.
Cords broke, and we had to tie them to-
gether.
The knots wouldn't slip around the pegs
and we couldn't draw the rope tight.
More remarks from the children's mother
on the subject of profanity.
Didn't pay any attention TO her, and thus
succeeded in getting through with the job.
They went down and harnessed the stove
The legs all fell out when we tried to lift
It on the zinc, but got it into position at last
Two lengths and one elbow of the pipe
missing.
Finally found the elbow in the bureau
drawer, and the two lengths rolled up In the
parlor carpet.
Got a Ratchet and stick of wood and
commenced pounding the pipe together.
Knocked a chunk out of one of our Knuck
les, and got the elbow on wrong end up.
Had to take it all apart and change it,
Commenced pounding again, but couldn'
make it jibe.
Pounded more.
The more we pounded, the more itwould
MT fit, and thought we'd give it up.
Expressed our opinion In relation to stove
pipes In general and this one in particular
and made some illusions to the original IN
yentor of this kind of furniture.
Went to the corner grocery and got 1--WE
lager,," felt much refreshed, and resumed
tho attack on the pipe.
Found out that what allied US before wa.
we had not pounded enough.
Remedied the defect and the job was done
Stove smoked beautifully.
Got wife to tie rags round three of our fin
gers and one thumb, and thought we woulc
sit down and have smoke.
Found meerchaum after a while, and dis
covered another mouthpiece broken.
Got the tobacco can, but on ascertainin;
that the salt cellar had been emptied into it
made up our mind that we wouldn't smoke
We concluded we'd better go to bed, ant
started to pick our way through the mass o
things piled up and scattered about
Stun bled over the long rockers of chai
and barked one shin. Returned no answe
to an interrogatory as to why we didn't breal
our neck; !" repeated "now lay me" am
turned in.
Having a strong constitution which ena
bles US TO bear good deal of sleep, and al
ways paying strict attention to our sleeping
didn't know anything till morning.
Told as she was deceived in the house,
If she had known what it was she'd neye
vzaH sv.kr - II 1I,.11 L Il
70 settle in it.
This settled Us, and declining to partak
Of the frugal morning meal which had beel
proyided-We remembered the supper-w
took our departure, promising to call in th
early part of the ensuing week. when thing
had been put to rights.
And We mean to go.