The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1866-08-15


skins in a garland and wreathed them
about our neck as she sat there in maiden
meditation fancy free, like box of No.
IL boots. Then we said :
+ "Oh, Betsey Jerusha thou has spoken
est with wisdom. will converse with
thee, elastic nymph. | am a barbarian.
We are all barbarians in the west. lam
an ignorant but well meaning whelp.
We are all ditto in the west. | wear
bear skins in the west--we all ditto i'll
that country. We have no houses, but
live intently without them as 'twere.
We have no carriages for either male or
female so called. But 7 can love thee. |
can hold thee to mine own, / will sur
round thee with all the luxuries we have
in that land Of darkness for the sun never
rises in the weSt!" Said Betscy, as she
pIayfully slung the hide off from another
conquered eel, Due tell
wanted information, and thus we dia-
logued.
MY Betscy Jsrusha, has much Of
parents:'
. Yes .Brickuel. have two parents and
four ante-parentS.
What didSt they do?'
NV ma taught school and skinned cells,
and my father was an eel catcher and
silver toneucd politician.
How many boys cans't thou spank in
a day.
1 have spanked. twenty. in an
hour and it want Il good hour for spank
ing cither.'
I, And eelS! How many cells cans't thou
peel in day. Tell me thou educator Of
the world!'
-, Well now, that is pretty right smart
of a question! guess kin skin six a
minute. Tskin 'em and sling 'em over
my shoulder into that are tub, and kin
keep one in the air ali the time, like a
cows tail in fly time, and aint much OF
skiniSt nuther!' ".:
Does it hurt the eclsi'
why Of course it kills the ecls! But
that is bis fault. If he'd had his skin
put on tother side out 'twouldn't hurt
'em any. 'Twould have slid off itself!
It~ our doctrine'in New England to have
things cnnformed TO our notions, even if
the eelS we skin don't like it. You see
this is the hub-and. the cells have no
rights we the skinners are bound to re-
sprct!' and into the air she playfully
tossed another Jard Of subdued, quiver-
ing agony!
Says We
DO you SKIN 'cm for fun or for proft!'
Betsey said it was for both. There
was money in it, and it was fun to see
them squirm, for they had no business
to~be cells, and to come to New England
in the spring and fall for what they
wanted. And thus Betsey taught me to
love Gentle christianlzed Betsey!
And kissed her. And | hugged her
there then. And I told her she should
be happy. And that she should have
eels to skin forever. That I'd have one
made on purpose! Then she smiled and
said she'd be mine, so-called, if I'd agree
to find her III cells; to find young ones
for her to spank to let her come once
wear to hear the biz organ and rock her
baby il the cradle of liberty ; to let her
kiss every nigger she saw; to let her
spend half her time in peddhng tracts
and making flannel shirts for babies in
Africa, and would do my best to extend
the blessed gospel and the likeness Of
Ben Butler in the enlightened region be-
yond the hub. .>>.
| consented of all she wanted Of me ex-
cept the niger On that was firrum.
So was Betsev. She said "nigger or
single blessedneSs. She said they were
her pets. | told her was democrat.
Oh gracious! She Strengthened up till
her corsets snapped like a pistol! |
thought she had gene off! But she
hadn't. She was there yet. Said she,
as she scrunchcd an eel in her hand and
waved her peehng machine over her head:
you Democrat! Marry a Democrat?
Go way! Git eout! Don't tech me!
! Oh YOU great, nasty western man! Take
your arms away from around my intel
lectual breast. Oh! you great, ugly,
western he man! I'd skin you like an
eel! Oh, Git eout! Rise your hoary
locks from that ere lap. III take my
cells and fly from your advances. Marry
democrat? I'm no such oman! Oh!
you great big, red-whiskered, grey head
ed, savage, unrefned, uncultivatcd, un
eddicatcd, big, nasty, ne man! How
dare YOU talk to me. Id die first, and
then | wouldn't!' And she done as Jo-
seph did in the night and went off into
Egypt, leaving me in bed Of eel skins.
And now I'm gone nutmeg, busted
what do you-call-it. I've lost my Bet>ev
Jerusha, and must lire in the west beyond
the eels and school marin charms of her |
so adoricd, for us of the west are not OF