The western Democrat. [volume] (Charlotte, N.C.) 1852-1870, 1866-03-13
THE DEVILS ASSISTANT.

: ""d SiuCt cary yOulu III cNcIy
day round of farm life, and who had never been
known to have the least i'll feeling towards each
other since the time when good old Parsou Har-
lot mad united them in the holy bonds of we'd
lock, twenty-five years before. SO we'll was the
1act OF their coDJugal happiness known that they
were spoken OF far and near as the happiest pair
IN England. Now the Devil (excuse the abrupt
mention OF his name) had been trying for TWEEN
ty years'to create what is called ga fuss in the
family between these old companions. But
much to his notification, he had not been able
| to induce the old gentleman to grumble about
breakfast being too late or the old woman o give
, single curtain lecture
After repeated efforts, the Devil became dis
couraged, and had he not been person of great
determination, he would doubtless have given
the work up in despair. One day as he walked
along in very surly mood after another attempt
to get the old lady to quarrel about the pigs get
ting into the yard, he met an old lady, neigh
bor of the aged couple, AS Mr. Devil and the
neighbor were very particular friends, they must
needs stop on the way and chat a little.
Good morning, sir" said she, ''and pray
ing? Isn't the controversy between all the
churches doing service ?'.
eyes" .
"Isn't Deacon W. making plenty of bad
whiskey 2"
Eyes"
"Wcll, what is the matter, my highly honor
cd master 2"
"Everything is going on we'll enough" re-
piled the Devil, "but (and he looked as sour as
a monkey on crab appletree) old Blueford
and his wife over here are ihjuring the cause
terribly by their bad example; and after trying
four years to induces them to do right, must
say l consider them hopeless"
The hag stood moment in deep thought.
care you sure you have tried every way p
"Every way can think Of"
care you certain ?"
eyes"
"WeN,' replied she, "if you will promise to
make me present of new pair of shoes, in
case [ succeed, | will make the attempt myself,
and see IT can raise quarrel between them"
10 this reasonable request the Devil gladly
assented. The cid hag went her way to old
Blueford's house, and found Mrs Bueford bu-
silly engaged in getting things ready for her
husbands comfort his return from work
After the usual compliments had passed, the
following dialogue took place
"WeI, friend B. you and Mr. B. have lived
q long time together"
give and twenty years, come November"
said she.
"And all this time you have never had
quarrel 2"
"Not one"
81 am truly glad to hear it, continued the
hag; [ consider it my duty to warn you, though
this is the case, you must not expect it to he
always Have you not observed that of late
Alr B. has grown peevish and sullen at times p
GA very little So, observed Mrs Buetord.
81 knew it," continued the hag, "and let me
warn you to be on your guard"
Mrs b. did think SO, aud asked advice as O
how she should manage the case.
"Have you not NOTICED" said the hag, "that
your husband has bunch Of long harsh hair
growing under the chinSide of his throat p
Yes"
''These hairs are the cause of the trouble, and
as long as they remain, you had better look out
Now, as a friend, l would advise you to Gu.
them off the first time you get chance, and
thus end the trouble, and as long as they remain
you had better look out"
Soon after this the bag started for home, and
made it convenient to meet Mr. B. on the way.
Much the same talk in relation to his domestic
happiness passed between him and the old wo-
man.
"But, friend Blueford," said she, II think it
my duty as Christian, to warn you 10 be on
your guard, for | tell you your wife intends
your ruin"
: Old Alr 3 was very much astonished, yet he
could not wholly discredit her words When
he reached home he thew, himself on bed in
perplexity, and feigning himself asleep, studied
the matter over in his mind. His wife think
ing this good opportunity for cutting off the
obnoxious hair, took her husbands razor, and
crept softly to his side. Now the old lady was
very much frightened at holding razor SO close
to her husbands neck, and her hand was not so
steady as it once was; so between the two she
went to work very awkwardly, and pulled the
hairs instead Of cutting them off. B. opened
his eyes, and there stood his wife with razor
at his throat. After what had been told him,
and seeing this, he could not doubt but that she
intended to murder him. He sprang from the
bed with horror, and no ex plauation Or entreaty
could convince him to the contrary. So from
that time there was jaw, jaw, quarrelling and
wranging all the time.
With delight the Devil heard of the success
Of the faithful emissary, and sent her word if
she would meet him at the end Of the lane, at
certain time, be would pay her the shoes. At
the appointed time she repaired to the spot and
found the Devil at the place. He put the shoes
on pole, and standing on the opposite side Of
the fence, handed them over to her. She was
much plascd with thcm-they were just the
thing.
'But there is one thing, Mr. Devil, I would
like you to explain; that is, why you hand them
to me stick ~
"Very easy to explain" replied he, "any one
who has the cunning and meanness to do as you
have done, don't get nearer than twenty feet to
me-" so saying, he fed in terror.
After while the old woman died, and when
she applied for admission to the lower regions,
the Devil would not let her in, for fear she