La sentinelle de Thibodaux. [volume] (Thibodaux, La.) 1861-1866, 1866-05-12
WIT%AND HUMOR,

WIT%AND HUMOR,
An old Yorkshire clergyman, who hat
strong lunged curate, inquired of
woman why her husband was so seldom a
| church. 80" she replied, +" that young
| man you've got roars SO loud that Johl
cannot sleep SO comfortable as he dit
when preaching yourself SO peaceably.'
Lawyers Doctors women. and Clerk:
of Courts are all . males" 5a1e
"a pair, Of pretty eyes," said Coxcomb
I" are the. hest mirrors to shave by
"Yes." replied old Hunk. the bachelor
",and | have known many a man shaved
by them" KS. .f,...
Mathews attendant, in his last illness
intending to give him his medicine. gave
in mistake. some ink from a phial on 8
shelf. Oh discovering the error. his
friend exclaimed: Good eayens! Math-
ews, | have given you ink
sNever mind--neyer mind. my boy
never mind,'' said mathews, family, g III
swallow q bit of blotting paper.".
/ A WARNING Poetical-ss Tell me, an.
gelic hosts. ye messengers of love, shall
swindled printers here below have no re-
dress above?" @ 81 q +
The shining angel band replied-ssTo
us is knowledge given; delinquents on
the printers book can never enter
Heaven? 2" 1895
An honest Philadelphia German got ex-
cited over an account Of an elopement of a
married woman, and exclaimed: IF my
wife runs away NIT anoder mans wife, /
will shake him out of her preeches, if she
be mine fadder, mine Got"
Oats it.
An Engiishman being asked how he
spelled saloon, replied: With hess. n
hay, hell two hoes and hen.
The hardest thing to hold in the worldis
an unruiy tongue. 1T beats red hot
smoothing iron and kicking horse.
$ Have YOU found a verdict % said a
Judge to the foreman of a jury. No.
your honor we have hunted in every cor
ner of the room, and there isn't one there -
" Shall / cut the line of mutton saddle
wise !" :" No. was the reply cut it bri-
dlewise. for then we may get bit in our
mouths -
A gentleman ordered servant to call
him at six !: but he awoke him at four, tell
ing him he had two hours longer to sleep.
The best thing to give your enemy, is
forgiveness; to your opponent. tolerence
to a friend, your heart; to child. good
example; to a father, Difference to your
mother, conduct that win make her proud
of you; to yourself, respect; to all men,
charity.
tits asserted by Pomphilius Quintias, in
his history of Greeian geniuses that Max
million Polonius, the celebrated Athenian
painter, portrayed events SO vividly that
it was impossible for landsman to look
at the famous group, the Sea Sick Family,
aostaout eomatsng snstaaiter. 4s,1
What length ought lady's crinoline
be IA little above two feet.
The wisest and best way to expand a.
chest is to have u good heart in it..
Personal beauty will fade, but the beau
y OF the mind endures forever.
Young men who idolize young women
always loveto be '.joined to their idols"
The happiness of life, like the light of
lay, consists not in one brilliant flash,
,ut a series Of mild, serene rays.
Do one thing at a time that's rule.
When you have done siandering your
leighbor, begin to say your prayers.
You can't be sure thata dog isn't cross
i'll you see him wag his tail. So before |
'ou undertake to pat him . wait for the
vaggin." 81 vi 80 js -
A gift which is prompted by gene-
Gus feeling, is far more valuable and ac-
.eptable than many rich offerings from !
eluctant hand.
Young gentlemen who would prosper in |
owe should WOO gently. It is not fashion
BILE for young ladies 10 take ardent
pirits.' .
An inspiring sight for glazier: The
arly day when it breaks through the
yindows.
s"PoP"-ING A HARD QUEsTIoN.-A
over, vainly trying to explain some sci
ntifc theory to his fair inamorata, said
The question is difficult. and / don't see
that / can do to make it clear z Sup T
ose you pop it., whispered the blushing
amsel. He didn't faint. s.3's s..
An exchange paper advertises for
orse for lady Of dark color. good
rotter, and of stylish action" The horse
must be young, and have long tail
bout fifteen hands high !" .sss. 9
What did the Germans use most about
he period Of the reformation The = Diet
Worms . = ''.. Il +,
What is the difference between school
laster and a railroad conductor? One
aims the mind and the other minds the
ain. Itmight be added that the conduc-
n looks before 0hen the switch is used, !
nd the school-master looks behind.
Al hypocondriac of rank and fortune. in
reland, imagines one Of his legs ofaone
sligion and one ofanother. He frequent
puts one of his legs outside the bed
lothes in bad weather, in order to punish
for its religious errors. +
A Sunday school teacher asked pupil
le meaning of ssthe wages Of sin il DEATH,