Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1866-07-21
ERsI MOR0US.
WIT AMI HUHOB.

To remove stains from the charac-
ter. Get rich.
Every railroad that leads to water
ing place is now grand trunk railroad.
-'Don't care much about the bugs"
said Mr.. Swink, ''but the truth is, I've
not got the blood to spare"
If you can't coax fish to bite, try
your persuasive powers on cross dog,
and you will be sure to succeed.
Shakespeare says that ''use strength
ems habit" Somebody states that he
tried the experiment on coat, but it
did not succeed at all.
1t is better to be laughed at for not
being married, than to be unable to laugh
because you are.
in a window of shop, In an OBJ
scure part of London, is this ammo nee
ment: ''Goods removed, messages TAX
en-, carpets beaten, and poetry composed
on any subject.
Why did John Huss die more
agreeable death than Charles L.? Be-
cause a hot steak is better than u cold
chop.
"A grim, heard-hearted old Judge,
after hearing fiowery discourse from a
pretentious young barrister, advised
him to pluck out some of the feathers
from the wings of his imagination and
put them into the tail of his judgement.
CT never shot bird in my life"
said friend to an Irishman, who re-
piled, ST never shot anything in the
shape of bird, but squirrel, which /
killed with a stone, when it fell into the
river and was drowned"
AT the recent dinner of the royal
geographical society in London. Sir
Henry Rawlinson expressed his belief
that there are not dozen members of
the House of Commons who know
where the Bay of Fundy is.
"A man in New Hampshire had the
misfortune recently to lose his wife,
Over the grave he caused stone to be
raised, on which, in the depth of his
grief, he had ordered to be inscribed
clears cannot restore her; therefore /
weep"
An editor describing the effects of
squall upon canal boat, SAYS
when the gale was at its highest the
unfortunate craft keeled to the larboard,
and the captain aud another cask of
whisky rolled overheard"
-"What would you think, now"
said professor who was examining a
class in "Paley's Natural Theology" in
relation to the laws of cause and effect,
"what should you think if you picked
mp watch in the street," 81 should
think" answered the student, II was
precious lucky fellowp'
The Philadelphia Bulletin says:
''Strange mingling of races. Two peo-
pie went to church the other day at
Kew, England. One was Mary Cam
bridge, Englishwoman and spinster.
The other was Alexander Teck, Austri-
an and bachelor. They came away AS
Tecks. Kew-rious wasn't it?"
Among the Hottentots, if widow
marries again, she is obliged to cut off
the joint of a finger for every husband
she marries after the first; this she pre-
sents to her husband on her wedding
day, beginning at one of her little fin
gers.
Come, sonny, get up" said an in
duIgent father to his hopeful son the
other morning. Remember the early
bird catches the worm" 'What do /
care for worms" replied the young
hopeful; mother won't let me go a
fishing"
"A boy whose honesty is to be more
commended than his ingenuity, once
carried some butter to merchant in a
country village to exchange for goods.
The butter having a very beautiful APP
pearance, and the merchant being de
sirous of procuring such for his own use,
invited the boy to bring him all the but
ter his mother had to spare. 81 think,
said the boy, ''she can't spare any more
for she said she would not have spared
this, only rat fell into the cream and
she did not like to use it herself"