The Cadiz sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1864-1911, 1866-11-14
THE FALSE FUNERAL.

h, t, ok ne hen my fat er |, and hot
me IN as his own son. The good man had
no children. His wife was long dead, and
he had an hone cid woman for house
keeper. and fourishing business in the
undertaking line, to leave to somebody; but
he did not leave it to me, and IL tell you
the reason.
When had been about FIVE years with
him and grown worth my salt. as he used 10
say, death occurred in our neighborhOod
which caused greater lamentatlon than any
we had heard of since my apprenticeship
began. The deceased gentleman was Mr.
Elsworthy. The family had been counted
gentry in their day should have said my
uncle lived in York, and all the world knows
what York hire families are. Well, the
Elsworthys were of good family, md very
proud of it, though they had lost every
acre of the good old estate which had be
longpd them time out of mind. | am not
sure whether it was their grandfather ) dice
and cock fighting, or their fathers going
surety for a friend who did something wrong
in government office, that brought them
to this poor pass; but there was no house III
all York where candles went further, and
tea leaves were better used up.
There were mother. two sist RS, and
cousin who lived with them. The mother
was stately lady, never seen out Of black
brocade. The sisters were not over young
or handsome, Tut they dressed as fine as
they could The cousin was counted one
of the prcttiest women in Yorkshire, but
she walked with a crutch, having met with
an accident in h.r childhood. Master
Charles was the only son and the youngest
of the family. He was a tall, handsome,
Gashing young man, uncommonly polite,
and great tavorite with the ladies. 1t is
said there were some red eyes in the town.
when the tory got wind that he was going
to be married to the Honorable Miss West
bay Her father was younger brother to
the Earl of Harrowgate, and had seven
girs beside her without penny for one of
them; but Miss Westbay was beauty, and
the wonder was that she had not got mar
red long ago-belng nearly seven years out,
dancing singing, and playing tiptop pieces
a, al the parties. Halt a dozen matches
had been talked of for her, but somehow
they broke down one after another. Her
father was rather impatient to see her off;
and so were h n sisters, poor things! and no
wonder, for, grow up as they might, not
one # them would the old man suffer to
come out ill the eldest was disposed Of, and
at last there seemed something like GER
tainty of that business. Young Mr.. Els
worthy and she struck up courtship He
was fascinated-isn' / that the word?-at an
assize ball, paid ma ked attention at the
bishop party. and was believed to have
popped the question at picnic, after Lord
Harrowgate, the largest share holder in the
Worth eastern Bank, got him promoted from
cerkship to be manager II true he was
some years younger than Miss Weshay, and
people said there hal zen something be-
tween him and his pretty cousin but "A
ord $ niece, with beauty, and accomplish
ments and a serviccahlc connection, does
not come in every Young man way; so the
wedding day was fixed .or the first Of Jan
uary. and all the mliners were busy with
the brides bonnets and dresses.
1t was just a month to come, and every
body was talking of the match, when Mr..
ElSworthy tell sick At first they said it was
a cold; then it turned to brain fever; at
last the doctor gave no hopes, and within
the same week Mr.. El>worthy died. The
whole ncighborhood was cast into mourn
ing. A promising young man, IN manner
the only dependence of his iannly., newly
, promoted to station oftrust and influence,
and Oh the eve of marriage, every body la
m4nt,d d his untimey death, and sympathiz-
ed with his bereaved relations and his IN
| IGIlutN DIIuG' tHtuh MY uHSIS idbShtSh
most Of all. None Of his customers, to my
knowledge. ever got so much of his sorrow.
When he was sent for in the way Of bust
ness, it struck me that he staid particularly
long. The good man could talk of nothing
but the grief of the sfflicted family-how
the mother went into fits, and the sisters
tore their hair-how .he cousin talked OF
wearing mourning all her days-and how
it was feared that Mrs Westbay, who in
sisted on seeing him, would never .ecover
her senses. The county papers gave ex-
preston to the public grief. There were a
grea many verses written about it. Nobody
PASSED the house of mourning without a
sigh or suitable remark. My uncle super
intended the making of the coffin, as had
: never saw him do any other; and when the
+ wo,kmen had gone home he spent hours at
night finishing it by himself
The funeral was to set out for the family
: vault, in the Minister Church at Beverly
} about three clock in the afternoon. 1t
r was made strictly private affair, though
hundreds of the townsmen would have tes
tilted their respect for the dead by accom-
panying it all the way. The members OF
the family, in two mourning coaches. and
the undertaken S men. were alohe allowed
to follow poor Elsworthy to his last resting
place, and the coffin was not to be brought
, till the last hour. My uncle had got it fin
iSh, d to his mind but evidently did not
wish me to look at his work. He had a long
; talk with Steele and Stoneman, two Of his
most confidential assistants, in the work
) srop after hours, and they went away look,
ing remarkably close. All was in train, and
: the funeral to take place the next day. hen,
= coming down his own stairs--they where
| L. nd f,rv WI lIypI n nm
Of the old houses of Ymk-my uncle slip
ped. fell, and broke his leg. | thought he
would have gone mad when the doctor told
him he must no: attempt to move or mind
any business for weeks 80 come, and tired
to pacity him by Offering to conduct the fu
neral with the help of Steele and Stone
man. Nothing would please the old man;
: never saw him so far out oftemper before.
He swore at his bad luck, threw the pillows
at his housekeeper ordered meto bring him
up the kew of the workshop, and kept it
fast clutcied in his hand. | sat up with
him that night. In couple Of hours he
grew calm and sensible, but could not sleep,
though the house was all quiet and the
t housekeeper snoring in the corner. Then
he began to groan, as ifthere was something
worse than broken leg on his mind, and
Tom" said he, haven't | been always
kind to your
ri "No doubt oft, uncle, said |.
"Well. Tom. want you to do me n great
service-a particular service; Tom, ond III
never forget it to you. You know Mr.. Els
worthys funeral comes off tomorrow at
I three, and they are very high people.
/ Never fear, uncle | II take care OF it as
| wen as if you were there yourself
, Il knew you would. Toni knew you
| would. could trust you with the hearsing
Of an earl 8 coffin; and for managing mutess,
, don't know your equal. But there's
something more to be done. Come over
L Il Il I Il. IA Lar