The Lancaster ledger. [volume] (Lancaster, S.C.) 1852-1905, 1866-12-12
What Happened at Our House.
by PETER sroRUM, ESQ.

After We were married, we'll say about
year, wun mornin thar wus a terrible
commoshun in our house-ole wimmin
tunnin in and out, and finally the Doctor
he cum; | was in great fury myself,
waitin to heer, | hardly noed what to do,
but ar!er awhile, an ole granny Of wo-
man, as had been very bissy about thar.
poked her hci into the room whar was
walking about, and ses.
Ses sh-, "Mr. Sporum, hits a gal"
"What," ses I.
IA GAL" ses she, an with that she pops
her bed back again.
Well thinks |, I'm the daddy Nv
gal, and begin to feel my keeping nicely
I'd ruther it wus boy tho thinks !
for he'd feel nearer TO me, as how he
would bare my name and there would be
less chance for Sporums to run out, but
considering every thing gal will do nifty
well. Just then the old nuss pokes her
he'd out an ses.
Ses she "Another wrn, Mr.. Sporum,
fine boy" Anu,her ses 7, that's rather
crowdin things on to fellow.
She IaNel and poked her he'd back
Well, thinks |, this is no joke sure n,
this lick I'll have family enutf to do me
In few years, but the Lords will no.
mite, be dun.
J's then the ole she devil, U always
viii hate her0 pokes her he'd in an ses.
"Ses size, "Anulher gal, Mr.. Sporum."
"Anuiher what, ses l."
"Anu!her gai," ses she.
"WelI," ses I, go rite s,rate and tell
Bal | won't stand l--don't want 'em-
and amt coin 20 haven dus she think
I'm Turk or n Mormon 2 or Brigham
Young 7 that she'd go for to hav thrhbs :
three at a pop? dus she think am wurh
hundred thousand that | am John
Jacob Aster or Mr.. RoschIe? that can
afford to hav thribbs, and clo,he and feed
s"'S0 'h'u'eh at iline alhl agoln
to stand it no how, didn't want 'em.
don't want 'em, and ] amt gojn to want
'em now nor no other time. IIain, bn
good dutiful husband to Sali Hahn, |
Kept in doors Nv mite, an quit chawin
terhacker, an smokin sigars js, to please
herr haint | attended divine worship
regular haint | bought her all the boz
nets and frocks she wanted ?-an then
for her to hav thrbhs | won't live with
her, she noed better and hadn't or,er dun
it. She dun it with her ise open, n mus
take the consequences. | didn't think
Sal would serve me sich trick no how
Have | ever stole horse? have I ever
done any mean trick, that she should
serve me in this way9 An with that
laid down on the settee, and felt orful
bad, and the more tbot about il, the
wuss felt.
Presently SAILS nanny, ole Miss Jones'
cum in An ses.
Ses she, Better cum in and see what
pretty chilIun you've got"
!"Chilun," ses |, you'd better say
whole litter. Now Miss Jones, 7 Iuv Sal
you no, and have tried to make good
husband, but | call this scay trick, and
II thar is any law n tbs country, I'm
goin to see If a omen can have thribbs.
an make man take keer uv'em."
amt agoin to begin 10 do it ses I.
With that she LATED fit to kill herself
an sed any uther would be proud to be
in my shoes. told her ia sell out mi,y
cheap if anybody wanted to take nv
place. Well, the upsbot Nv it all was.
that she persuaded me was all rong.
aud got me to 60 in the room wbar they
all was.
When ] got IN Sal looked so iovin at
me, an reached out her little hands so
much like poor deer helpless child that
forgot every thing bat my luv for her,
and folded her mp gently to my heart like
preshus treasure, and didn't keer if
she had forty Nv 'em. Js then number
one set up whine like young pup,
and all the balance followed. Them
tbribbs knew .heir daddy.
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The nueStion of annexation IN tho Uni;