The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1866-04-07

the part OF rascally CneaClng Jockey, Dy repre-
sentng his animal to be everything it was not
Tam's object was to do honestly. SO, when
would-be buyers gathered aroun to look at the
beast, guidman Tam cried out "Haud oot owr,
banes, baud oot owrl hae TO put on the har-
ness on her every day wi the ptchtork -
Spoken very quickly and yehemently); and
thereupon, in way as ifhe did not want people
TO see. he began tickling the beast to prove his
word by occular demonstration. The ruse took.
Some one, thinking the matter was all q Joke,
and the man Just queer one, bought the ami
ma at o6 G5oe NeT /. day. S the gSwkb bod do as
says he, IA ye said was true" 'And do you
mean to say ye ever dooted my word, sir ?n says
to him.
When ow'r the fire ye place the kettle,
And want yoUr bree to be smoke free,
o. clean white saut, a chosen pickle,
Lay on the lid, and say Forbid.
The Bible was considered by the old folks as
a depository OF all knowledge of everything
that ever was, or is, or should be known. The
common belief appeared to be that everything
good or natural was 10 be found in the Bible,
and that whatever was not found In it ought
not 20 be- In warning young folk of anything
that was thought hurtful or wrong, the reason
assigned would be that it was forbidden: "Such
thing is torbidden;' and II asked where
forbidden ?" the reply invariably came, Where,
but in the BiOle?o AS a universal refuge tor
ignorance, anything that could not be &C
counted for was said to belong to the hidden
mysteries of the Bible and any old saw, COM
mon saying, or story that could not be other
wise authenticated, was at once referred to the
Bible. If any doubt should be expressed as
to such or such a thing being really in the
Bible, the reply would be, Nae tear it's init
gin 'twould be foun' oot.n Ignorance on any
subject, supposed to be very commonly known,
was held as showing a great want of know
ledge OF the Bible. 1 remember old Hugh
Roy, who was noted as a great Christian In his
day, once asking beggar, who was relating to
him, story about the water-kelpies, what he
understood these 10 be- "Losh, man!n re-
piled the beggar, "but ye're ignorant o. your
Bible, when ye dinna ken about the water
kelpies ]"
An old lady called one morning on Eneas
Ross at rather an early hour, and as it proved,
her account with the guidman, and, without
much ceremony, tabled the money; whereupon
Eneas, rising seized 'the root of all evil, )" and
with the greatest disgust, flung it to the other
side of the room with this reply to his visitor,
"Do you think am 10 do homage to that vile
worldly trash before 1 bow down before my
Makerl Get thee behind me, Mammoth
DIR. Maccoll and Mr.. Mackimmie having gone
one time INTO the far west to preach, were so in
hospitable received by the people of the place,
because, as they afterwards learned, they were
taken as eXclsemen, that they could not so much
as get night-lodging No one would receive
them. At length, however, though very reluc-
family, they were directed to the dwelling of an
ola WOmdn lar up amongst Ihe 0lllS, anu were,
moreover, furnished with guide Arrived at
the old woman's house, their guide announced
them with q word OF explanation in his own
way, and took his leave. Here they were in.
deed received, but with very i'll grace Their
hostess remarked to them that if they wanted
food, there was some sowens that her other
people had lett, and if they liked to take that
and milk they could take it. 1t was rather cold
retreshment, but they took 1t and were glad to
get it. Having despatched their repast, they
asked the old dame if they could have grass for
their horses. To this she replied that she had
grass away in the park on the southern shoulder
of the hill, but it they wanted any they would
have to shear 1t themselves.
'We' do thot,n rejoined DR.. Maccoll, in great
| glee, and thereupon started for the southermost
| shoulder OF the hill.
80 doctor!" said Mr.. Mackimmie running up
| to him, II can't shear-I can't shear! ~
"But I'll shear it," said the doctor; land you'll
carry II home on your back
In the morning, at the first peep of dawn, they
were reused from their slumbers by their old
hostess humping at the door. "Rise-rise 7"
| cried she.
''Why so soon ~ they replied.
'"Ihats my business" said the old dame; but
| if ye want 70 know, rise and see; may be, too, it
| may be something IN your own way of business;
ye'd better look sharp, hadn't ye"
To this they replied by tossing themselves in
| the bed as ifthey essayed to rise; but being no.
wise tired of the blankets yet for they had but
| few hours of sleep, and not feeling that they
| had rested enough Tor the fatigues of the pre-
ylous day, they were 10th to rub their droWsy
| eyes. But the old lady was not to be diverted.
| She returned again, something louder than be-
| fore, and, to urge her request, became so con-
| descending as 10 explain part of her reasons,
| and to say that it was necessary for them to get
| up without more ado, for she was going to hear
| great minister from the east country and she
| had all her gear TO put right before she could
| go, but she must go, come everything that
| might, and If they wanted a breakfast, they
must take it then, or none, for she wanted
them out of the way, and no more ado. This
was plain dealing and making virtue of ne
cesslty they rose, and proceeeed to avail them
selves OF the breakfast, which consisted OF tive
''bickersp OF oaten "porritch," and milk, anC
barley cakes. Then, having finished their meal
they got themselves "out of the way.n
At the hour for beginning the services, DR.
Maccoll stood up in the minister's box (thert
was no Church), to the astonishment and dis
| may OF not few, bnt to the utter bewildermen
and terror of the old lady, the doctors hostess
The sermon she bided, but Immediately there
after she ran home, scrubbed and secured tn
| room, brought forth her best and most preclou
| gear breaking at the same time some dear arti
| cles thereof, and when her guests returned tn
| old lady, now writing like roasting eel
ushered them into a room that made the minis
ters stare, and having made them sit down to
table covered and groaning with the mountai
| produce, and all the most esteemed Highlan
luxures overwhelmed them with courtesy an