The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1866-11-01

war, Wlch they all opposed, and pralsln
our mutual friend Seward, wich they
had alluz hated ez Ablishnist and
hedn't heerd yet that he he'd jined the
Demokracy. Wuz it any wunder that
we went under7 Their aint but one
thing left to us, and that we strangely
neglected. My lord why wuz the MIG
GER not made the central figger this
year ez heretofore? He is the capital
NV the Democracy--its refuge-its tow
er Nv strength. l spoke in Berks coun-
ty myself, following one of them new
tangled Democrats who he'd set EN- all
asleep talkin stuff to EN- that they didn't
understand. Mountin the rostrum, /
circulated ..... r
"MEN AND BRETHREN DO YOU WANT TO
MARRY A NlGGER?"
"No! no" they answered, straight
enin up to wunst. a".a. =.
"Do you want niggers for sons-in-
law?" .... :rr ...
"No! MOI"
"Do you want laws to prevent you
from marryin niggers9" '.
"Yes! yes!" ..
"Do you want to be marched up to
the polls, by those who tell you how to
vote, beside anigger?
"No! no."
"Then vote the Demekratic ticket"
and they all replied
"We will! we will" and they did
You see, your Exelency, the Demekrat-
ic mind isn't hefty enough to compre-
hend them fine arguments as to con-
stooshnality, etsetry, and when speak
er deals in EN- they suspect his Dimoc-
risy and fight shy Nv him. But nigger
they kin all understand. It's soothin to
the Dimekratic mind to be continyooal-
ly told that there is somebody lower
down in the skale--they desire ainfe-
rior race, and therefore, hev bin pullin
the niger down toward elm for years.
Did you not notis whenever we went it,
on the niger, we succeeded in awaken
in an enthoosiasm wich, when we neg
lected or selected other issues we failed
to get? ...
ats based upon-philosophical trooths
The poorer and meaner man is the
more anxious he is to hev it understood
that there's somebody still poorer and
meaner than him. Hence 700 notis
that them individooals who see a 5 cent
peese so seldom ez to not know its ma
cher, and who keep the flag Nv distress
wavin from the seat Nv their pants !;
who, eff niggers wuz sellin at cent
apeese, coodent raise enough to buy the
toe nail NV one, is the most ardent
friends of slavery.
That pitiful man wich jest left the
presence wuz not to blame for the re-
suit in his deestrick. He tried to earn
his bread, but wat Good he do? The
Ablishnists knowd he wuz bought with
a price, and LATED at him; the Democ-
resy, sich ez voted, we'd hev got any
how. Them ez didn't vote nor do moth
in wuz the upper ass, wich expected
the offises themselves, and was disgust
ed accordinly.
"My liege, | hev spoke. Yoo cant do
nothin with new party, for yoo kin
only git the Dimocrisy to jine it and
they wont do it onleSs the offises is
throwd in. Yoo cant run the Democ-
risy on only one issue, and that's the
nigger, for it's all they kin understand.
So long as the niger exists, Democri-
sy endoors-when the race becomes ex-
tinct, the party dies. The two is indis-
solubly bound together-one wuz crea-
ted for tother, and tother for one.
When Noah Gust Ham, he laid the
foundashuns NV Dimocrisy. Ham wuz
turned into a nigger because Noah got
intoxicated-his misfortune originated
with wine, and whisky, wich is the
modern substitoot therefor, bein the
motive poweruv Dimocrisy, hez bin
persekutiu him ever sence. l attriboot
the decline NV the Dimocrisy to the
bleachin out Nv the Afrikin, and that's
why l oppose amalgamashen. Yoo
can't hate mulatter one half ez much
ez 700 kin a full-blood, and it will be
observed that the intensity NV Demokri-
sy has decreased precisely in proportion
to the. scarcity nv pure blacks. Thus
Demokrisy is committin' suicde-ith hez
bin the means Nv its own destruction.
81 don't know ez there's any yoose NV
talkin. The Congressman elected this
fall continyoo in offs, my liege, jist pre-
cisely ez long ez 700 do, to day, and by
that time they'll hev it all fixed. Moo
York may change in our favor, but |
think not. The break commenst in
Maine, and it increased asst progressed
We're gone in. The Ablishnists laughs
in glee, and the niger shows all his
worries. We shel hold our places two
years, and then farewell to our great
ness. .. u
Il pity yoo, my lord, but I can't help
700. Ez for myself kin save enuff out
NV my Post Offs to start small grocery
at the expiration NV my term, and then
farewell politics. In that pleasant calln
I'll float down the stream NV Time until
Death closes the polls and ends the
struggle. | hev sed.'
The Conference ended with this, for
they wuz all too much affected to say
anything. Seward murmured suthin
about it would be oil rightin sixty days
that there wuz no denyin that the