The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1866-07-26

ITS, AND MoDE OF EXISTENCE OF THIS Ex.
TRloRprSARY ANIxAL.-This singularly
amusing and wondrously eccentric biped
is not confined to any particular cline,
but whether in Nova Zembla or Tasmania,
Otaheite or Virginia, his salient cha
racteristics, habits, and customs are very
much the same. Neither time nor cir
cumstance makes any great change in his
appearance or plan of operations, and
whether his dainty face is polished with
blubber in the north, with palm oil in the
south, or his languid frame hung with the
irreproachable garments of civilization in
the west, he bears certain marks which
point him out as widely different from the
rest of the brute creation. 3.
In Virginia at least, the perfect "court::
ing man" must possess many natural and
acquired graces. He must have an ave-
rage degree of personal pulchritude, he
must know how to dress with taste and
discretion, he must be moderately intelli-
gent, and have, or think that he has, q tho
rough knowledge of the world, men, and
manners. One cardinal rule must guide
his life He must ever court" but never
"marry," for the occurring man" who is
so false to his creed as to be honorable and
true, has lost forever the respect and admi-
ration Of his compeers.
The "courting man" not only makes
love, but manufactures it to order, and, as
he is never in love himself, and can always
keep his head cool though his words are
never so warm, he has terrible advan-
tage over such rivals as may be less pru-
dent, but more honest, than himself. His
grand idea is to "court" every pretty girl
that he meets. He believes that little
sense, little prudence, q great deal of
patience, and determination not to be
foiled, will enable him to win any woman
between Virginia and kamschatka and
when the deluded one is fairly smitten, he
shows his glistening teeth, washes his snowy
hands, and glides away, in polished boots,
to seek another victim.
The means at the command of the court
ing man are many and various, and his
campaign is conducted with an ability
that is only taught by long experience.
When first presented to the intended
"victim he speaks to her with that courtc-
Gus Difference which is the sweetest hon.
age that can be laid al the feet Of woman.
Adulation in words he never practices !;
he compliments by what he does rather
than by what he says. From the first mo-
ment of his acquaintance he refrains from
speaking upon commonplace topics, and
quotes poetry or prose with an air OF
modest diffidcnce that says: "Of course
you knew oil this bcfore-correct me if
you please! !" The speculative Shelley,
the luxurious Keats, the Kaleidoscope
Byron, and even graceful Sucking and
rare Ben Johnson are at his tongues s
end, and he repeats their choicest passages
in soft and dulcet tone that adds to the
music of their verse and the tenderness
of the poets thought. "Victim is tired
and wearied of talking of war and the
weather, of lost battles and indGcisive en-
kagcments, and the occurring mans"
remarks naturally tickle and interest her.
The first stone is thus laid in the temple Of
mutual admiration and one-sided love A
morning visit follows, and the "court-
ing man" then takes another step. He
knows that women are SO awfully guileless
and unsuspecting that they will have no
suspicion or distrust; and as he has to
amuse and interest at the same time, scve-
does not wish new acquaintance to talk
etcrnally about herself; but she is al
ways open to an appeal to the gene
rosity and nobility Of her character. Her
mind has thousand sounding chords,
but the harmonious vibrations Of the chord
of "pity" is the most powerful of them
all; and she is so conscious Of her own
power that she never hesitates to give any
counsel or assistance that may be demand
ed of her. This the "courting man ]"
knows of old; and he knows also that the
chord of "pity" is the best that he can
play. He speaks to the "victim," Of his
aimless, useless existence, and tells her
that all his modest talents have been
wasted for want Of definite object or
purpose. "For myself" says he, 81 have
no ambition, and have not yet found the
woman who cared for either my defeat or
my success" He says that hs is blaS<,
disguised with everything and everybody
(although, in all probability, he has never
been beyond the limits of the State of Vir-
ginia except in war;, and processes gene
raj contempt for this " deliciously wicked
world" The sympathies Of the "victim !"
are aroused; she grieves over knowledge
lost and ability run to seed; allows the
counting man to call her "sister"; thinks
that she Is sister to him, particularly If
she has no strong and muscular brother /;
and so ends the first act in the melancholy
drama. The man is thoroughly aroused,
he phys "victim" with incessant atten-
tion, watches the blush upon her cheek as
he whispers in her ear words of "frater-
nal" affection; gains her implicit conf
dence, and then quietly says "good MORN
ing, fair FRIEND" pulls the string, rings the
bell, and repeats his performance with an
entire change Of caste.
Another admirable plan Is the "Guar-
dian Angel" business, which, properly
managed, has never been known to fail.
In this case the "courting man" tells
"victim" all his troubles and errors so
candidly that they seem almost virtues,
and accuses himself Of many an error, that
she may have the pleasure Of hearing his
confession and granting him forgiveness.
Nor will he fail to make some "tremen-
dous !" sacrifice before his angels" shrine.
He will profess morbid fondness for
iulcps and cocktails, or VOW that he can
not live without his beloved pipe, and then
offer to give up one or all for her dear
sake. IIa ha! "Victim," he can safely
do this, for 1t will not be for long. Then
will he speak to her Of the sanctity Of love,
and say:
"Itouch her a. my beads, with devout care.
And go unto my courtship - my prayer
all of which he does not Then he will
tell her that her influence has saved him
from sin and shame, has made him better
and purer man, and has purged the follies
from his mind. He will hint at perfect