The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1866-01-25
Mr.. Nasty Dreams a Dream.

Mr.. Nasty Dreams a Dream.
The Democracy Emigrate to Merfco -mey
form Government. get Dssgasteo U'"s e''0'
other. and return Home. .uf
WASHINGTON, Dec. 1, 1855.
Last mite, was the victim Nv another
dream. Eff l don't quit TINS eXpiorln tne
realms of the fucher in my sleep, l shall be-
come a second Saint John. Ef so, make no
doubt nv revelations will be Nv remarkable
startin character. do
Methawt the Ablishints had asserted the
power we diskivered they possest, after the
late elecshuns, and had gone the whole figger.
They had forced the South into the humilia-
shen NV allow the niggers to testify, and in the
Northern States had given EN- the elective
franchise. Wv course, the educated and refin-
ed Democracy wood never consent to be car
ried up to the polls alongside NV nigger-uv
course no Democratic ofice-seeker wood hoo
initiate himself treatin Niger atore cleo
shun--it beein article Nv faith with us never
to drink with Niger onless he pays for it.
Therefore, bein helpless, and resolvin never to
submit, the heft Nv the Democracy determined
to emigrate in body to some land where the
Anglo-Jackson Good rool,-where there was
no mixter of the digustin African. Mexico
was the country chosen, and methawt the en-
tire party, in one solid colum, marched there.
Our departure was a ovation. The people on
our route wuz all dressed in white as token
Nv joy, and from every house hung banners
with inscriptions onto EN-, SIGH ez:
SNOW is our hen-roosts SAFE"
"Canada on its way to MeXicop Dos
"Poor MeXico-we bewail thy fatew
Our march resembed very much that Nv
the children of Israel. Our noses wuz the
pliers Of fire by mite, and our breath the pill
lars of smoke by day. rr
On our arrival to Mexico, the natives of
that country, struck probably with awe at the
majestic and famin expression of our counte-
nances, hastily gathered up their linen and
silver spoons, and horses, and SIGH, and retreat
ed TO the mountains. 1t was a compliment to
us that them that had not ennything remain
ed.
r. Finally we reached a plain where we, the
modern children NV Isrel, decided to rem ane
and Nv course the fust thing to do wuz to form
a Government. ~
Methawt Fernandy Wood, ov Moo York,
wuz chosen viva voce, eZ President, and he
slept foreyd to hev the oath administered to
him, which Wuz 2 be dun by the oldest Justis
ov the Peace oy late staff of Moo Gersey,
which hez committed suicide. Here new
trouble ensood-there wasn't a Bible to be
found in the who encampment. The diff
Guilty wuz got over by Moo York Alderman,
yelling out, 'Never mind the oath. What's
the use ov envy oath he takesw So he wuz
declared President.
Pres. Wood then proceeded to organize
He requested SIGH as had held commissions in
the army ov the Yoonited States to step forred
three PAGES. Gems. Mickelan, Buel, Fitzjohn
Porter & Slocum slept forred, and with EN-
some 1000, part ov whom he'd held quarter
masters commissions and whose accounts
"Jest afore the battle, mother"
Didn't balance, but which allez did just after,
and others who he'd bin dismist for bein in the
Pear, when their sooperiors desired to see them
in the front, and who consequently considered
it id Aberlishen war, which they didn't
approve ov, no how.
Then hevin ascertained the material for Of
ficerin his army he axed all them who he'd bin
LII the service ez privates TO step fored. 10000
obeyed, and the President asked the fust one
where he enlisted, who ansered ez follows:
cat Moo York, April, 12, 1864, bounty
$1,000; and at Philadelphia, April IA, 1864,
bounty 500; and at Pittsburg, April 16, 1864,
bounty $500; and at Cincinnati, April Is, 1854
bounty $500; and at"
Enough" said Fernandy, and glancin
down the line and seein all the faces wer ov
the same style and expreshun, he asked no
more ov them any questions.
Remarkin that it was we'll enough to estab-
fish church, be desired all who were minis
tiers ov the gospel to step fored. 81 slept out
and desired to explain. They could not say
tina wer jist now in full connecshun with eny
church. Tha he'd bin, but their unconstoosh-
mel Aolishen Synods and conferences he'd ac-
coosed EN- ov irregilarytyS, and suspended EN-,
ann silunced EN- and SIGH, becoz they wer
DimmefkratS, but 80
the President shrugged niz sholdurs and
arsked awl who Good read to step out.
About l hart answered, and then he re-
quested awl SIGH Nv this number ez kood bee
prevailed upon to accept small orfis, and
who bleeved themselves fit to step out agin, &
mi unuterabl horror and CONSERVATION. evry
but slept out az brisk az so many beeZ-
!mmeJitiy there waz a uprore. Them az
koodent read swor vociferoslie that thar waz
nothin fare about the arrangement. Tha
never knowd that man waz obleeged to be
able to read to hold orfis in the Dimerkratik
party, and tha'd never stan that, an tina awl
slept out.
Finally it wuz decided that election shood
take phase at some fucher time. .
The next step wuz to divide EN- up into en-
pigments. The President requested them
ez preferred to follow mechanical employment
to step out. Some 30 advanced. Them ez
preferred farming. About so slept out. Tha
ez expected to run small grocery.
There wuZ a sound like the rush ov many
waters.
Ninety-eight per cent. ov awl ceptin the Or
Users and preachers-5prung to the front, but
when tina saw their strength their Eases turned
white. "Good Lord" whispered they, "we
can't make Twin out ov the remainin 2 per
cent and the orfisers and preachersp : Us
The mass then demanded divishun ov the
property, that awl mite start alike, but On TAX
ing inventory it waz found not worth while
to bother about divishun.
Then they kommenced mur1nurin, and sed
one to another, "Oh, for the flesh pots ov the
Egypt we left. l Good at home live off nv
Aberlishen nabers. There waz rich men in
our ward, but az we had the majority, they
padethe taxes which we spentl Aberiishun
lists Is pizen. but it is well enough to have
enuF to taxi" and az man tina resolved to
return nome, Fad the conclusion that resulted
from the brakin up awoke me-
There is unquestionably moral in the WIS.,
ion. Ez often ezI hev syed for perpetual
Timmerkratic majorities, 1 hev sumtimes.
when our party was successful and bid fair to
be so permanently, wondered what we Good
do with the Treasury eff we didn't lose the Of
fees occasionally, so ez to hev the other par
ty nurse it into pickin condishun for us.
I don't think shood like to live in a unan-
linus Dmercratic community.
, PETROLEUM V. Massey.
Late paster oy the Church ov the Moo Dispen-
saShun.