The Shasta courier., 1866-04-21
SHASTA COURIER.
Tbe Doctor and the Bear.

nii.'ne who held higher position. IN ms
estimation, than the subject OF this little
The doctor was a tall. pompous specimen
r - oenns blower" of Falstathan pro-
norriops. and hailing from Pike county,
T;sso,ri To use his own choice language.
be was =. not much on doctoring. but was
some pumpkins on grizzly bars. lie
MIGHT not understand the use of the scalpel.
but was an expert at mixing a cobbler, or
plaving poker He was also famous hun
ter. and many and bloody were the encoun-
ters be had passed through with the bears
and other monarehs OF the Sierras. Nothing
delighted him so much as to gather a crowd
of miners around him. when he would ex-
patate at great length upon his exploits as
a hunter. compared with which Grizzly
Adams, Nimrod. or DR.. Livingstone were
but tyros in experience.
On the breaking out Of the late rebellion,
the doctor Immediately took sides with the
rebels, and hesitated not to express his
opinions at all times and places.
The miners bore with him awhile, until
forbearance had ceased to be virtue, and
then decided to punish him in a manner he
would not soon forget, at the first opportu-
nifty.
The occasion was soon presented, Tor one
cloudy afternoon, soon after, the doctor
shouldered his rifle, remarking as he did So,
that he was going in search of grizzly. =
He had scarcely passed out Of sight before
"a party proceeded to neighboring butcher
shop. and borrowing an old OK hide, OF huge
dimensions, commenced the manufacture OF a
mammoth grizzly bear.
Placing it over the backs of two of the
most mischevous of the party, who stopped
for that purpose, and sewing and stufing
with hay the open spaces. they soon bad
the satisfaction of beholding a most fero-
cious looking bar" as the result of their
labors. 1t was truly life like deception,
the two men making the motive power com
plete.
just at sunset aye grizzly" was driven
about half mile from town, and stationed
in deep ravine, by clump of bushes near
the trail by which the doctor would return.
Then hiding themselves near by, the boys
waited with breathless interest for the re-
suit. They had not long to wait, for their
victim soon made his appearance, hurrying
along with heightened strides, and casting
furtive glances to the right and left. As
he arrived opposite the clump of bushes,
the g bear" gave horrible growl, and then.
with an angry whoof," plunged into the
trail, directly in front of the atfrighted doc
tor. For an instant he stood transfixed with
horror, every hair brstling with fear. and
then, dropping his rifle, he turned and fed
as though pursued by all the tends Of Tar
tarus, yelling as he went:
God of my fathers, protect me u
Seeing a live oak near at hand, be made
for it. and giving one frightened leap, land
ed safe among its branches, and moment
later bruin was at its foot, snarling and
growing in the most approved manner.
The doctor was safe. but what situationl
Night was fast settling around in silence
and gloom, while black cloud hurrying up
from the southeast, gave warning of an ap-
preaching storm. Evidently something
must be done Immediately, or a nights
lodging in the tree would be inevitable.
The g bear" sat contentedly at the foot of
the tree occasionally giving fearful growl
and trying his teeth upon the bark. to keep
his victim in comfortable state of trepida
ton. A few moments later hoarse peal of
thunder doomed over the mountain, follow
ed bv Il fierce glare of lurid light while
wind and rain swept through those old for
est trees as though each were striving for
the mastery.
1t soon died away, however. when the
beseged doctor gave vent to a mourn!ul.
long drawn !" halloo," that fairly convulsed
his concealed listners with laughter. No
reply. Again and again that desparing cry
rang through the forest. answered only bv
the bloodthirsty growl of bruin. At last,
hoarse by his exertions, the doctor was in
expressibly relieved by hearing faint
halloo'' in return Nearer and nearer il
came, and finally he could distinguish the
forms of his neighbors, as the moon had just
risen above the eastern summit. His cour
age returned at once and he shouted
Hurry up aad kill this bar for I'vs
had an awful fight with four of 'em, and
they We chawed me all up
. IIalloo, DOCTOR" said the foremost, - il
that you?p
Yes, what's left of me. Hurry up; Tn
most gin out; back all scratched and chaw
ed up"
Now. look here, DOCTOR" said the spokes
man of the party, you are known to be ont
of the worst secessionists in these parts, anC
unless you'll promise to reform, vote tn,
Union ticket at the next election, and sup
port the Constitution, we'll leave YOU II
roost in that tree tonight"
''I'll see you hanged first. and then
won't !" yelled the enraged doctor.
Very we'll. Boys, come on" anc
tufHtuHs tuel ieil tuc Spot. ioiioNeu py
fearful growl from the bar" who com
meneed slowly to climb the tree. This wa
decisive.
Stop Stop Come back, boys, and IL
promise y he fairly groaned after them.
la a moment they returned, and poured il
a voley from their reVolvers that stretched
his bearship upon the ground Very eau
tiouSly the doctor descended. exclaiming-
Amt he n monster? Tell you what
we had an awful ight-rolled an scratched
up more'n an acre of bushes. Bnt, let.
take his hide, to remember him by"
One Of the party now advanced, and, with
few vigorous strokes of his bowie, com
petey diSemboweled the defunct grizzly
when out spraug the motive power, the
inner man. in the shape of two well
known acquaintance.
Such another shout as then went up, was
never heard before am1ng those mountains
The doctor looked astonished then confused,
but soon rallying, he whined-
= For the love of Heaven, boys, don't tell
OF this, and I'll keep my promise. as I'm a
sinneri''
: lie has done so most religiously."
A sorHIsr, wishing to puzzle Thales, one
- aae wisest men of Greece proposed to him
~ M rapid succession these difficult questions :
Ha' Is the oldest Of all things? God. be-
''"sS he always existed What IL tha most