Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1866-09-26

her head-gal all the time, everywhere
and that of the excitinest kind. Ov course
| leaned up tu her as close as | dar tu, and
in spite ov long legs, appetite for whlskey
my shurt serape, and dads actin 'hoss
she sorter leaned up to me, an was
beginnin to think war the greatest al
comfortabiist man on yeth not exceptir
Old Buck or Brigham Yung, with all his
radil cullered, wrins led wimmin, eradels
full of babies, and Big salA Lake thrown
in. Well, wan day cussed deceivih'
palayerin, stinltin, Yankee pedlar, all jack.
knife and jaw, cum to old man Barnes,
with load of apple parius, callicker, rib
bins, jewsharrs an s-e.d.y powders
Now mind I'd never hearn tell ov that
truck afore, an be darned ef don't want
it to be the last-wus nor rife powder
WIS nor percussion-three time as smart
an hurts wus, heap WIS. Durn him
Durn all Yankee pedlars, and durn their
principles and practisis, say. wish ne
had all the sody powders they ever made
in his cussed psunch. and slow match
fixed tu him, an hsd chunk oy fire,
the feller what found piece of him big
enut 70 feed a cockroach, ought tu be
king of the Sultan's harem thousand
| years for his luck. They amt human no
how. The mint at Filadelfy is thar
heaven; they think their god. eats half
dimes for breakfast, hashes the levihs for
dinner, an swallows cent on dried ap.
pie for supper. sets on stamping machine
for throne, sleeps on q crib full ov half
dollars, an measures men like money, by
count. They taint one of them got d
soul but what eqd dance jig in kab.
bage seed, and leave room for the fiddler.
"Well, Sicily baught tin box ov the
sody from him, an hid it away from the
folks savin it for me. I happen'd to
pass next day. an ov course | stopped to
enjoy look at the tempter, and she wur
mighty >loyin tu me, put one arm around
my neck and luther one whar the crcin.
gle goes round boss, tuck the inturn on
ME with her left fIt an gin me g kiss
Says she:
"Sutty, love, I've got somethin fur ye,
new sensation | believed it, fur |
begun to feel is already. My toes felt
like little minners were nbblin at 'em
"a cold streak runnin up and down my
back like lizard with hen turkey arter
him in setin time, my heart felt aot and
unsatisGed like, aud then Id u shot old
Soul eff she had limited needsisity for
sucf an operashua. Then she poured ten
or twelve blue papers ov the sod:y inter
big tumbler, and about the same num-:
Der of white ones inter tuhcr tumblcr.
an put nj onto pint of water on both ov
them, and stirred Elm up wt;h a case knife.
lookin as solemn as an ole j;ckass in IL
snow storm, when the fodder is III gin out
She hlt one while she iold Inc to drink
luther. swaled it at one ruA-ta<ted
salty like, th"t it wur part of the scnsa-
shun. But i wur mistaken, all Nv the
cussed sensation wur tn cnm, and it worni
long at it, hoss, you'd better believe me-
Then she gin me luther tumbIer an
sent it arter the last, race hoSs fashion.
In about one moment an hat th"t
had swallowed thril~hin machine i'll
full blast Dir a couple of bull dogs, and
they had sot tu fun. seed that | wur
cotched agin-same family disperstiQn
to make cusscd fools of themselves every
chance-so broke for my boss. stole
look back, an thar lay Sicily On her
back in the porch scrcamin with lafin,
her heels up in the Dir kickin ov them
together like she were tryin to kick her
slippers off But had no time tu look
then, and thar war road of foam from
the house to the hoss two feet wide and
four inches deep-looked like it had been
snowin-poppin, an hissin, an biln
like q tub of hot soap suds. had gath
cred c!.errytree linn as run, an lit
astraddle ov my hoss, a whippin and 81
kickin like mad This, with the skeery
noises made (fur ] wur a whislin, an a.
hissin, an sputterin, outer mouth, nose
an eyes, like steam engine) sot him 4
rarin and covortin like he wur out of hi,
senses. Well, he went. The fome rolled
and the ole black hoss flew. He jist
mizzled-skered nj tu death, an so wur |.
SO we agreed on the pint of the greatest
distance in the smallest time.
IL aimed fur Doctor Goodman's at the
Hiwassce Copper Mines, tu git somethin
to stop the explosion in my inards. l.
met sercut rider on his travis, toward
fried chicken an hak full ov ball bis
kits As cum tarm along he hilt up
his hands like he wanted to pray for me,
but as preferred physic tn prayer, in
my peculiar situwashun, at that time, |
+ Jest rooled along. He tuck. a skear as |
cum nj on tu him, his faith gin ont, an he
lodged hoss,. saddulbags an overcoat inter
thicket, just like you've seed a turkil
take water ofen log when q tarn big
steamboat Gums along. As he passed ole
man Burns, Sicily hailed him, an axed
eff he'd met anybody gwille in hurry up
the road. The poor man thot perhaps he