Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1866-09-07
TIE CLEYEEAND FARCE

which the military politicians OF the
Johuson party have called at Cleveland,
to indorse the Philadelphia Convention
This Is ike the play Of Hamlet with
/ Hamlet left out, and an opportunity lost
for dramatic performances compared to
which those at Philadelphia would have
/ been a mere side show. Suppose that
I Custar, the gay young martinez, who first
inflicted thumb-screw punishments on
Union soldiers for taking watermelons
/ from rebels, and who at the Grand Re
view last summer made Gilpin ride,
sans hat and sword, Ia order to show
] Andy how smart he Was-suppose that
he, the long-haired Miehigander, were to
stalk into the hall linked arm in arm with
Fitzhugh Lee; and suppose these were to
be followed by Rosseau, the knight of
Gutta Percha, hand-in-hand with Bragg
and then Dix, the gallant newspaper Gen
eral who favors shooting rebels "on the
spot, provided a spot be selected where
it won't hurt them any-suppose he were
to follow, linked with Breckenridge, who
/ waits for such an opportunity just over
the border; and then Franklin Joined
with Dick Taylor, who thrashed him so
terribly during his Red River exploits
and then McClernand, who quarreled
with Grant, and Pemberton, who accept
ed the situation at Vieksburg; and then
/ Warren, whom Phil. Sheridan squelched,
and D. III. Hill, whom Phil. squelched
/ likewise; and then Slocum, who stepped
into Toe Hooker's shoes, and Hood,
whom J oe and his Iron Clads" liked so
well and then Frank Blair, that hered-
itary patriot, and J oe johnson, the mis-
taken one; and then McCook, the man
who wasn't hero of Chiekamauga, and
Buckner. who rejoiced that hecatomb
of Yankees was slain at Ringgold-why
If such a procession were to come into the
Convention before the assembled multi
tude, what melting effect it would have
what deluge Of tears would be shed
All what magnanimity was there-what
patrietic forgi7eness-What Christian
brotherly-lo Why, it we're enough to
melt the hearts of all Cleveland. and to
/ make the streets run with tears enough
to turn Lake Erie salt. And then the
dramatic effect might be still farther ia
creased by placing above the Presidents
chair the national eolors intertwined with
Forests black flag and cross-bones, to-
gether with the Confederate Stars and
Bars. And then the evidences of har-
mony aud reconciliation might be made
still more emphatic if the walls were
hung with portraits of the leading Federal
Generals on one side, and the prominent
Rebel ones on the other. And then there
ought to be a triple medallion of Mr..
Lincoln, Andy johnson and JEFF. Davis
hung up eonspicuOusly. Each delegate
should be dressed in uniform half blue
and half grey, and the Convention might
be appropriately opened by singing the
Star Spangled Banner and the Bonnie
Blue Flag in alternate verses. After
that there ought to be two prayers-one
by Rev. FL. w. Beecher and the other BY
some pink Of South-Side, pro-slavery,
secession preachers, who didn't believe
that rifles were better than bibles for the
cure of rebel rufianism in Kansas.
But alas alas for the natioualism of
the Democracy when it withholds the
hand of greeting from the chivalrous sol /
diers of the South. If we are to forget
and forgive then the Democrats who
fought in the war ought to be the first to
set the example. Why, what a splendid
thing it would be if they were to go down |
there to Andersonville and shake hands |
over the ten thousand graves made by |
Wirz. Only think of R. E. Lee en-
bracing Dix, and Joe johnson, Slocum. |
right among the bones of those unfor- |
tunate fellows welcomed to those hospit- |
able quarters by the friends of the "lost /
cause r. Or the Convention might have
been held at Gettysburg where our
Southern brethren fought US so CALAMITY |
in trying to get to Washington to olsen
thrall Us from the despotism we hated so
much, and where the obligations we owe
them for their good intentions would /
have been more vividly brought to mind. /
Or it might have convened at SDottsyl-
vania, where the bones of unburied sol
diers still bleaching in the sun would
have given tinge of the tragicaI to the
act of reconciliation, and where the sur
roundings would have highly increased
its dramatic and political effect. Or at
Richmond, where Libby Prison would
have afforded commodious and appro
pirate place for holding the convention,
and where the tears shed by Dix & Co.
might have washed out the bIood-stains
left by the victims shot by the rebel
guards, and thus, as it were. blotted out
forever the slight mistakes of treason
But then, in view of these possibilities
for effect, to think Of holding the Con
vention on the very Northern border of
Yankeedom Bah And then to ex-
clude Southern delegates Pshaw! Is
that national Is it fair?
But then the Brevet Generals who
have ordered the soldiers to report at
Cleveland will manage things in their
own way, and it is presumptous for any
one beneath their rank to intrude any
We drop the subject by
simply advising all the rank and file who
do not care to assist these disinterested
patriots in obtaining Office and promotion
without receiving any corresponding ben
eft to themselves, to stay away from their
Bread and Butter Conventicle.
ILLINOIS will send delegation to the
Soldiers Union Convention at Pittsburg,
on Sept. 25th. Why does not Ohio and