Fremont journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County [Ohio]) 1853-1866, 1866-06-29

and was mustered out as Lieut.. COL
''Gen. lie Fever" entered the same regi-
ment as Adjutant and was mustered out
as Major. If our Copperhead friends are
particularly anxious to know who oHr in
formant was, let them call and wewill
cheerfully give them his name.-HaRcoek
Jefersomian. - = aas,
A gentleman can probably marry any
lady Of his acquaintance--3 he plsases.
DR.. Chapin says there is a class of men
too shallow to have conscience, and too
cold to have heart. '--'--~s--
What is the best attitude of self-de-
Tense I" asked an amateur of pugilist.-
Keep civil tongue in your head" was
the reply.
Some married folks keep their love like
their jewelry, for the worlds eyes; think
ing it too precious for every day wear at
the fireside. .s1 -'sts 10 .ise-.-rs. t,.if,
Some men keep very savage dogs
around their houses, so that the hungry
poor who stop to ''get bite" may get It
outside the door. '
A Dutchman describes New Workers as
"a berry fine beeples, who goes about der
streets all day scheating each other, and
dey calls dat pizziness." sii5--, 81
Do you want to, know the. man against
whom you have the most reason to guard
yourselfs Your looking-glass will give
you very fair likeness Of his face. a.i
Punch says: IA Yankee baby crawls
out of his cradle, takes a survey of it, in
vents an improvement and applies for a
patent before he is six months DID,"
'There are two ways of being rich,"
says French writer: 'Raise your revenue
to the level of ~ our desires-or lower your
desires to the level of your revenue.
''say, Pomp, where you get dat new
hat?" ''Why, at de shop, OBJ course
"What is the price of such an article as
datT 81 don't know-the shopkeeper
wasn't dar."
'FThere's our jeremiah" said Mr.. Shell
ton, che went off to make his living by
his wits" ''Did he succeed 2" "No,n said
the old man, with sigh, che failed for
want of capital" a's.7
1t was Dean Swift who was to preach a
charity sermon; aud giving out his text
'He that giveth to the poor lendeth to the
Lord, then added, '1f you like the seeur-
ity, down with the dust" sr-a7 % s-s-,
Mr.. PuIlup coming home late .'pretty
full" finds the walking slippery, and ex-
claims: 'Vy-very singular; wh-wheneyer
water freezes it allus fr-freezes with the
slippery side up; singular"
''The last best fruit which comes to lats
perfection, even in the kindliest soul, is
tenderness toward the hard, forbearsnce
towards the unforbearing, warmth Of
heart towards the cold, philsnthrophy
towards the misanthropic." "a--a7-
"Johnny, nv dear, run to the store and
get some sugar." said a mother to her pre-.
eociors son of II years.
"Excuse me, ma; / AM somewhat in.
disposed this morning. Send father, and
tell him to bring paper of tobacco along"
A friend once visiting an uRworldly
philosopher, whose mind was his kingdom,
expressed surprise at the smallness of his
apartment s'Why, you have not room to
swing catP "My friend,n- was the ss-
rene unappreciative reply, 81 do not want
to swing cat" s'i' 70 7ai'e' 7ai
The intimacy which is begun over the
wine bottle has no heart. / never knew
good feeling come from it, or an honest
friendship made by it; il. is only a phsn-
tom of friendship and feeling, called up BY
the delirious blood and the wicked spells
of the wine.--Thacksyay. r,a f ~.
"Got anythin' to eatl' inquired Bum
mer of a long-faeed secesh, whose pantry
he was ransaeking. "No, whimpered
Long-face, "we'uRs is jist starvin,--no
corr, no taters, no nothin'. "Why in
thunder, then, don't you forage some, as
we doW was the prompt rejeinder.5-s =
'Doctor, / want you to prescribe for me"
The doctor feels her pulse. .'There is
nothing the matter, madam; you only
need rest. Now, doctor, Just look at my
tongue. Just look at it, Now, say, what
does that needT l think that needs rest,
too" Exit madam, in state Of great
excitement, - 9].ilsT-eessa frsr
aloud aisy, Nike" said one of two
Irish pedestrians, as he reverentially ap-
preached a milestone. sThread lightly"
said he, .for here hes very ould man"
Pat carefully spelled out the inscription,
Baltimore 154 miles, and then eontin-
ued: "He was 154 years aould, and his
name was Miles, from Baltimore.
A stranger from the country observing
an ordinary rolling-rule on. the table took
it up, and inquiring its use was answered:
'it was rule for counting-houses.n Too
well-bred, to ask unnecessary questions,
he turned it over and over, and at last, in
a paroxysm Of baffied curiosity, inquired:
SHOW in the name of wonder do you
count houses with this % -9i'9 ,l,.-e1
"You have lost your baby, hear" said
one gentleman to another. "Yes, poor
little thing! it was only FIVE months old.
We did all we could for it. We had four
doctors, put mustard poultices all over it,
blistered its head and feet, gave it nine
calomel powders, leeched It's temples, had
it bled, and gave it all kinds Of medicine,
and vet after weeks illness it died.
An exchange paper says there ia no ex-
cuse for having the blues, 1t tells how to
be free from them. This is the prescription:
Visit the novels Of the poyerty-stricken,
and tender them all the assistance in your
power. Charity expands the human soul.
gives generous color to the faded cheek,
fills the dull eye with the lustre and brilli-
ancy of beneyolence, causes the sluggish
gait to become elastic, drives away the hy-
spirits, and gives buoyancv