The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1866-11-29

Q~Ruy.-RUsYufeum- Nasty Dseasos- -
1Dream...A. johnson KiDg.

Posr 0A.ss, coxvsDs.r EoAns, sw,eh(
Orsoher a. 1855.
Dreass SSQ, leafed p persons
NV y, ~has5 I a Nh Nsse sint any,
thing g1oss ofsensnsl put ne that /
know ~ TsdoI estl M Shat is to |
offset u edes w 11ieks wich, eff
wasn't 1ounDpr1c3est, Voc lake me
entirely e9heti1l for ttH grovelin
world. T1ds lcFE to f1ptrsin my exu-
berant imaginasknn and Unable me to
come down to she dry detail Nv offish'l
hfc-to fit me for the proper discharge
nv my dooties CT a Postmaster. Whiskey
;ifts me above the posishun-pork brings
me back agingHIts fat and greasy like
the pay and perqnisites as the Postmas-
,cr-it comes from tie most nasty, sehAe-
less and ;!nclean wv animals, like our
commisi,ups short, I recommend all
uv Johnson's po$'masters to cat pork.
lis their material diet 6. 30 IT. 4ssq
Last mite paltooas nv pound or so
foo much, anil ez n conscience. didn't
sleep well. While l wuz eatin moistin
my lips with louisville eonslntion, the
whitley. l was a nusin onto SewarTs
question whether they wood hey John
son President or King. and while m,isin
4 Tell H. tue aTIHS Cl AlOTiuS. iASAsu
lust loose from the body and sored 5aEz
] sunk to- slnn,ber the narrow room witch
is ct onst nay efiis aud dormitory, widen
ed anil enlarged. the humble chairs be
come suddenly upholstered in gorgeus
style. the taller dip become multiplied
into thousands sny 7goraous chaud leers,
tie portraits ~ His -Highncss thcfres
dent, and the other Dcm ocrsts on the
wall, became alive. Icomprehended the
situation to vunst. sAndroo johnson
had cut the Gofdan knot with snmehod
dy's sword, and he'd carried ont his Pol
icy to its material concloosin. He-wuz
King and wux lrei gnm under -fitlS NV
Androo the l, and wuz lin my dream uy
course) in his kingly halls. ,..-
Itwuz, methawt, reception nite. His
high mightiness WIZ a sittin onto n eleva-
ted throne covered with red velvet and
studded with diamonds, and pearls, and
onyxs and cthe,. precious stones-onto
his head wuz q CROWN. and Ire wHz en-
yeloped into robe Nv black velvet, his
nose and the. balance NV his. face giean,-
ing out like fiasIluv ftenir from a thun-
der cloud. Lynn prostratesat the foot NV
the throne, doin the offs NV a footstool,
wuz Charles Summer, wunst senator.
wich wuz typikle NV the complete triumph
we he'd won over orr enemies, while doin
other mental Offices about the hall WIZ
Wade, Wilson. Fessenden, Sherman and
others who he'd opposed the change from
= republic to a kingdom. They WIZ
clothed in approprit costoom, knee
LRreeches and SIGH, and presented pc
kcolyeriy lmposin appropriateness. -,
Carriages containing the nobility he
gan to arrive, and ez they entered the
grand high lord chapberlin nv the pals,
the Marks Won Randall announct en-
"Dook de Davis" WIZ calculated, and
Jefferson entered. earl Won tToombs,"
''Sir Joseph f. Johnson" marks de
Bouregard, "Count de Pollard" and
so forth a4sS&&~A 4@@ W S4E@ 10
Noticin that the titles he'd heerd wuz
mostly tached to Southern men, asked
Giddy Welles, who WIZ standin by, why
it wuz thus, and he sed that Northners
wuznt RELY fit for it. Wewuz, he said,
low, grovlin race, and coodent adapt
South wuz shivelrus and Good do it -
They wuz given to tournaments and sic
they he'd got accustomed to cirkus
clothes, and could wear sword without
its gettin awkwardly between the legs
Northern men. SIGH ez wuz faithful, wuz
allowed to s,arsk IN the smiles nv royalty,
but it WIZ in cispositions ez sootesltheir
= capacity. He, for Instance. he'd charge
NV the royal poultry. ward, a position
wich he bleeved he filed to the entire
satisfaction NV his beloved and royal mas
= ter. He he'd now -four hens sittins each
on four eggs, and he hoped, in the course
NV two years, ef there WIZ no adverse
circumstances, to hev fresh eggs for the
royal table. 1t WIZ a position NV grea,
responsibility, and one witch weighed up
on him. Seward was prvy counselor,
n<<~littlo cto ri 4
and Thurlow Weed wuz keeper NV the
king revenue, ana WIZ dom very. ell
indeed.
BY this time the company assembled
His Highness wuz in q merry mood and
unbended hisself There waz knot nv
the nobility gathered in = corner, and
after earnest interview of a minnit
Count Won Cowan advanced to the foo
Nv the throne and on bendid knee de
manded a boon. s.-,a ~.s
what, my faithful servitor, dost thou
most desire n sed his Highness,s
1--WE wood, your Majesty, hev, the
prisoners Of state brot in to the presence
that we may axe merry over ccm2
sit shell be done, said His Majesty
and forthwith Baron won Steedman, who
he'd command NV the Kings Household
Body Guar,i, wuz sent for them. In
moment they wos brot in They wuz ,
uizable iookin set. 10 Forney and " endel
Phillips VINE chained together. Fred
Douglass and Anna Dickinson, Dick
Yates and Gov Morton. Ben. Butler
and Carl Schurz; Kelly and Coyode
while Chase wuz tied to Horis Greedy
onto whose back wuzas placarl inscribed
1.-THE last NV the Tribunes, at wicl
RAYMOND, who left the Radikels and de
clared for the empire at precisely th'
right time, and WIZ new editor NY tn
CSsrt Jc&r,sal, LATED immediately Som
one exclaimed, bring in Thad Stevens,
at which His Majesty turned pale ans
his knees smote together. = DON don't,
seq he, .he's strength enuff left to wa
his tongue Keep him away keep hir
sway ~ and he showed ez much fear
men do in delerium tremens when the
see snakesss IS Va g esT-.s,a aaes5s3
Mcthawt made inquiries and foun