The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-02-02
NUMBER 6.
SPARE LINES.


those who seldom drink from 1t.
Why /, a dogs tail a very great novelty
Because no one ever saw 1t before.
A good bank to have stock ina bank whcro
early falls the due.
May not bird who sleeps upon tho wing be
said to occupy u feather bed!
In q strike Of mechanics whccl.wright
should be selected Us spokesman.
Death comes to a good man to relieve him;
it comes to q bad man ~ relieve society.
Every plain girl has one consolation: though
not pretty young lady, shc will II shc lives,
be pretty old one.
Il is always safe even to learn from our cne-
mics seldom sale to venture to instruct even
our friends.
Why should marriage lc spoken Of as a ten.
der tie, when il il ~ conioundcd tough that
nothing but death can cut IL?
Ho that cannot forgive Others breaks tho
bridge over which he must pass himself; Tor
every msu has need to be forgiven.
Some lives are very respectable in the begin.
ming and middle. but, like MI I'll worn shoe.
run down at the heel.
A Mormon preacher says tho world is apt to
charge the devil with moro sin than he Is prop
erly answcrable for.
The best way TO kill bed.bugs is TO chain
their hind legs 10 tree, then go round IN 'front.'
and make mouths ut them
luvincihle fidelity. good humor and compla.
cency of temper, outlive all tho charms OF
6ns face, aud make tho decay OF 1t invisible
A lady was asked tho other day why sbs
chose to lvc single life. She naiyely replied
'Bccausc I'm not able to support husband
Sharp.
II was ono Of the famous Sir Boyle Roche's
sayings. that "singlc mislortunes never como
alone, and the greatest OF all possible miSfor.
tunes is generally followed by much greater"
A golden rule for young lady, is to con.
verso always with your female friends as II q
gentleman were Of tho party; and with young
men, as IL your female companions were pres.
cnt.
II is vain to put your finger in tho water,
and, pulling it out, look for hole; and equal.
" vain 10 suppose that, however largo space
you occupy, the world will miss you when you
die.
A punctual man is rarely poor man, and
never man Of doubtful credit Ills small nc.
counts are frequently settled, and he never
meets with difficulty in raising money to pay
large demands. Small debts neglected ruin
credit, and when man has lost that, he will
find himself at tho bottom OF bill he can not
ascend.
SAKE, tho joker and poet, was oncc takinga
trip on steamer. when hc iell in with lively
young lady, to whom he made himself very
agreeable. or course he made an impression
upon tho damsel, who said, at parting. "Good-
BY, Mr.. SAKE, but fear you'll soon bo forget
ting me-" "Ah, Miss" said tho invetcrato
punstcr, "lf was not married man already,
you may bc sure I'd be for getting you"
A retiring Western editor says "that all is
vanity" From tho hour he started his paper
TO tho present time has been solicited to lie
upon every given subject, and can't remember
ever having told wholesome truth without
diminishing his subscription list, or making an
enemy. Under these circumstances Of trial,
and having a thorough contempt for himself,
no rotires In order to recruit his moral consti.
tuition.
Tom Corwin used to tell a story about horse
Jockey in Lebanon, Ohio, who had q rule mover
10 lend man dollar unless he would put
down two Spanish milled dollars as security
Tho jockeys threo main rules for life, however,
wcro first, never refuse to drink with man,
because II won't cost you anything second,
never ask man to drink, because 1t will cost
you something, and might lead tho man into
bad habits; third, never mind what happens,
30 long us IL don't happen to you
"Sr," said one man to another who hes.
itatcd about beneGtting himself at the expense
of tho reputation of certain individual, do
ceased, "You are notoriously an immoral man,
and almost the utter opposite Of Christian,
though you say you believe in heaven. Why
do you hesitate then In a matter like this ~
because, sir, was the grave reply, "the late
Mr., though u peaceful man, hated any
thing sneaking; and fear that if | should
tako advantage OF his death I might meet him
in heaven. and he'd lick me ike ha:e,r
Lord Siaftesbury on ono occasion was exam
ining a girls school, and just as he was about
to tako leave, he addressed girl somewhat
older than the rest, and among other things
induircd, "Wbo made your vile body ~
Please. my lord" responded tho unsophisti.
Gated GIRL Betsy Jones made my body, but
| made the skirt myself"
similar reply is recorded Of another char.
~ scholar, who was under examination in the
Psalms, "wbat is tho pcstilenco that walkcth
by darknoss?" "Pease, sir, bug.."
Girls, beware Of transient Young men: never
suffer the addresses OF "a stranger; recollect
that ono steady farmer boy or mechanic is worth
oil the aoating trash in the world. Tho allure.
ments OF u dandy Jack with gold chain about
his neck, q walking stick in his paw, sorno
honest tilor's coat on his back, and a brain.