Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1866-05-22
W. For the Spectator"
Animal Instinct. i s9si- 3'

Mr.. EDrroR :-In village towards the far
thest limits OF the county, some weeks ago, a
sle-one of the porker variety, Of portly dimen-
sions, and gifted in an unusual degree with
that instinct which wise Providence provides
all its creatures with, whereby all their wants
are anticipated, and by no means scrupulous
as to the means by, which she supplied hers,
had created for herself reputation among the
feminine bipeds. her neighbors, not enyiable, -
Juvenile and unfedged chickens and turkies
sometimes caused her a savory repast,, and
when the good housewife, close by, would find
the quadrupedal old dame, leaving the coop
lately alive with the pretty little sratclers, now
tenantless and deserted by all the feathered
bipeds, except the disconsolate and heart-bro-
ken hen,9 and smacking her huge jaws, and
grunting out her regrets; not like Alexander
that there were no more worlds to conquer, but
no more infant .tomls to be devoured, wolld
you feel surprised at hearing certain expletives
uttered by lips polite?
There is said to be time, when all the little
frocks and wrappers and baby fxings are sought
for and prepared by the foreseeing provident
and anxious mother, and the instinct of provi-
ding for and taking care of their young, is given
for wise purposes to the lower animals. i:ga
To the student of natural history, who makes
the habits and instincts of animals, birds, and
fish his study, there is an unending series of
lessons to be learned. But to return to our
heroine, the hirsute grunter of immense pro-
portions, now rapidly. approaching that inter
esting period, when she anticipated becoming
in Latin phrase, mater fan,iIias, what spot
think you was fixed upon in her porcine brain.
fol. such use The widest imagination would
be utterly at fault, to conjecture. The stack
yard, the barn, the stable, the woodhouse, were
all regarded far too common, and unfit for SO
sacred and uncommon a use, and finding the
partor-door open, in proud and with stately
dignity she enters, and pausing by the centre
table, to view the apartment, its fitness struck
her swinish lady-ship with such force, she
grunted out her approval, and commenced most
Systematically the necessary preparations. Ia
king, the cover of the centre table in her huge
jaws, she drew it, with books, daguerreotypes,
ACCORDION, &c, to the floor. The soft parts of
the books, with the cushion from the sofa were
rapidly being converted into downy and elias
tic bed, in one corner of the room, when alas
for the happy dreams Of the queenly matron
the door opened and the astonished lady of
the mansions stood upon the thresh- hold .Je-
mime, Jerusalem and Constantinople. Her
porkish majesty lost sight for moment of her
accustomed solemn and dignifed tread, and
the regular long drawn and complacent grunt !;
she did not, la the language of Shakespeare,
stand upon the order of her going" but with
a terrible squeak. she acent at once, and gather
ing herself up collectively and individually, at
the bottom of several steps, she stalked away
wiser, perhaps, yet giving utterance to her dis
pleasure in divers grunts as she unused upon
the difference between the parlor and COW she'd
Meeting her to-day, looking fat, yet much
changed in rotundity. she appeared to have re-
covered her equanimity and in matronly dig
nifty was followed by half dozen fine chubby
happy looking little piggies. Methought she
indicated a desire, that the foregoing singular
her prudee pre- promising that hat in the sup ture she he
would Discriminate more closely between the
coal shed and the =91ti 1'9ai' PARLOR. 3