The Greene County Republican. [volume] (Waynesburg, Pa.) 185?-1867, 1866-11-14
THE CONTRADICTIONS AND ODDITIES
OF THE ENGLISH TONGUE.

The language is full OF paradoxcs
Show me fire. said a traveller to tn
landlord, for l am very wet;and,' he ad
ded, bring me a mug of ale, for / an
very dry You walk very Slow sale
a man to consumptive. Yes he re
Piled; but l am going very fast =
Breaking both wings ofan army is almos
certain to make II fy:a General may
win the day IN battle fought at night
lawyer may convey house, and ye,
be unable to lift hundred p unds; .
room may be full of married men and
not have single man in it; traveller
who is detained an hour or two may
recover most of the time by making n
minute of it; a man killed in duel ha,
atleast one second to live after he il
dead a fire goes ont and does not leave
the room; lady may wear snit ont
The first day she gets it and yet put i,
away at night in Az good condition IA
ever: school master with no scholars
may yet have pnpili in his eye; the
bluntest man in business ls generally
the -harpest one; Ananias it il said,
told lie. and yet he was borne out by
he hystanders; caterpillars turn over a
new Leaf without much moral improve,
ment; oxen can only eat corn with the
mouth, y'tyou may give it. to them in
the ear; tood bolted down is not the
most likely to remain on the stomach
soft water is often caught when it rains
hard; high woids between men are fre-
qnehlly low words; steamboat officers
are very pleasant company, and yet we
are always glad to have them give us a
wide beth; nervous man Ia trembling.
faint, weak--a man Of nerve and a ner
vous style are strong. firm, vigorous.
Our phrases are not designed to he
too iherallv. Punch tells us
Of man who was arrested for attemp>
ting to damage the river Thames, What
was the man doing! He was trying to
pull up the stream. 81 Joseph's bielh-
zen have been excused tor putting him
IN the pit, because, it is SUI posed. ;hey
.hought 1t was good opening for a
iourg man. a pens n who holds fast
% the truth % literally that he never le;
t escape HIM il not to be commended
my more than the man who tax the
,art of friend when the action refers
- pudding hut not to quarrel -
} iphue of old was turned into tree;
'ow-a-days horse is frequently turned
nto field
Two or three words are strung to,
ether, and instead OF retaining their
omblned meaning, acquire new sig.
ification How different is the action
escrlbed in securing floor; in skim
ming the sea and skimming milk; in
reaking a dish, breaking colt and
commandments in catching a
rain and ratching a cold; ia falling into
ditch, falling In loye, tallngin your
wn estimation, aud falling IN with a
-iend, or falling out with a friend, or
,lling out of a carriage This pecu'
arity of our words in sha' renders you
0 liable TO read, IN the funny column OF
our newspaper, Of the person who, IN
II explosion of griet, burst into tear,
nd whose remains have NJ been found,
r who carried out ject and was
bliged to bring it back ag,ini. oI who
epl his word and so had quarrel with
Ioah Webster, who wanted it for his
or who eou ted an investlga
on and was welded to his own opin:.
ms; or " no got off "A speech. and has
nee been trying to get ON again, hav-
~ found that his tram ct remarks was
ct tho right one; or who, at mass
being fired with lnliynatl"n.
az put out; OF who being hemmed in
Y a crowd, has since been troubled by
stitch in hi, shIe, or who was lost'in
umber, and afjer wandering tor long
me in his own mind, finally got ont on
nightmare,
What d" we rican by the awkward,
very day question. slow do you dor
What do we mean when we speak OF
Did times, knowing as ce do that what
'e call old times were really the new
nd young times and that the present
The true old age of the world? Has
ny debating society ever deci' led
neither house burns up or down.
Via, do we mean when we soy, az we
tlpn do. that we will do Thing in no
imes We have no oocasion to laugh
I the mistakes If foreigners when we
re 80 continually misunderstanding
arh other. Said Richard Brinsley
to h,s wild son Tom, Take
,v;t.. Tam. md refprm, With nil NV !