Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1866-01-31

whether our poor innocent children, born
over durin the war, we're all illegal and
had to be born over again or not. This
Hast pint are much unsettled, but our
women are advised to be kahn and screen.
Nv. friends, our aim hav honestly
been to sit you all back into the folds Of
the gloryous old Union. Like the
prodvgal son, we had nuthin to live on,
and feelin lonesome and hungry, have
been bowin and scrapin and maxim apol-
ogvs for five or six months. We have
been seen standin afur off for weeks and
weeks. but durn the caf do they kill for
us. They know we've got nothin, for
they eat up our substance, and as for
putin rings on our fingers, we couldent
expekt it until they bring back the jew
elry they carryed away. I cannot say,
in the langwidge of the poet, that our
labor hav been a labor of love, for we've
had moustrus poor encouragement to be
shore; but we had all set our heads to-
wards the stars and stripes and we
iintly determind that, come wool come
wo, sink or swim, survive or perish,
thunder or litenin, we'd slip back, or
sneak back, or git back somehow or
somehow else, or we'd stay out forever
and ever amen and be hanged to EN-, SO
called, I golly.
Up to this time it hav bin up hill
bisness. The team was a good one and
the gear all sound and the wagin greazd,
but the road was the rufest, rottenest
cordvrov in the world. It's pull up and
skotch, and pull up and skotch, and ever
and ANONYMOUS the skotch slips out and
the tung cuts round and away we go in
the gullyl Andy johnson is the driver
and he says, "Go slow" and he hollers,
"Wo wO |" and luses the road, and we
then hav to 90 back TO the fork and wait
till he blazes way. He seems to be dOin'
his best. but then there is Sumner and
Satan and Stevens and Davis and other
like gentlemen, who keep hollerin at him
and crackin his whip and confusin his
idees, so that sometimes we don't no
whether he's gee in or haw-in. My
friends, about these fellars, 1 don't know
what ort to say. Ifyou do, if anybody
does, I wish they would say it. 1 don't
encourage cussin in nobody, not atal, and
if you know q man that can't be broke
of it durin his material life, it mout be
we'll to hire him by the year.
If there is in all history good exkuse
and proper subjek, it is upon them
harliess. soulless, bowetless. gizzardlQss
fratrasidel. snhsidel, parasidel, sisteesi-
del abominabul, contemptibul, disgns-
tibul individuals. I sometimes think Of
EN- till my brain gifts sorter added, and
7 feel like becumin volunteer cOuvikt
of the Lunatik Asylorum. Charity in
ciines me to the opinyun that old Sum
ner are crazy. I think be has been git
tin worse ever since he took Brooks on
| the brain, and 1t do seem like the dis
ease have proved contagUs. fthey are
for Peace it must be the Peace that
passeth all undorstandin for we cant
, fathom it in these regions They fout
Us to free the poor nigger but dident keer
! for the Union. The Western boys fout
Us for the Union but dident keer for the
niger. By double teaming on US they
licked US and we gin it up, but now the
one don't want our niggers and the other
/ don't want our Union, and its the hardest
/ skedule to pleas EN- both that a poor
vanished peepul ever undertook. It's the
most hardest war to wind up that history
rekords. Sumner, Satan and Company
are still fussin and fumin about the
everlastin njgger-want him to vote and
make laws. and squat on jewry, and
want TO prohibit rs Rebels from doin the
same thing for 30 years to cum ! Jeeru-
salem! where is the cussin man They
say its all right for a nigger not to vote
in Connecticut, bekaus there amt but a
few of EN- thar; and its all wrong for EN-
not to vote in Georgy bekaus there's a
heap of EN- here. and they talk Logik
and Retorik amaziu to prove how it IS
Well I haint got whole passel Of sense
like sum, bat as shore as I'm two foot
high a niger is a niger I don't keer
whar you smell him, and vote is vote
I don't keer whar you drap it. I gnlly
they cant git over that.
The truth is, my feller-sitizens, I some
times feel like we dident hav no Govern
ment. I felt that way sorter when Mr..
Gibson appointed me a committee OH the
State Of the Republik. When the Sekre-
tary read outmy name all mixed up with
the Republik, I felt that was obliged
to resting. Risin magestikully to my
feet, says I, " Mr.. President 1 beg to be
respektybly exkused sur, if you please.
If thar is any Republik on this side of
Jordin l can purseve it at this time with
these speks. Thar was a place in old
Virginny called Port Republik, but Mr.,
Rebel General Stonewall jackson wiped
out its contents generally in 1868, and
haven't sinse heard of it in Northern
literature. I have heard of a skrub con-
sarn over about Washington they call a
Republik, but, sur, it are likely to prove
the grandest imposture that ever existed
on a continent of freedom. I suppose,
sur, it are to be moved to Boston or the
internal regions in few days and want
nuthin to do with it. ExSuse me, sur,
but [ must insist on bein respektably
discharged" I took my seat amid the
most profoundest and tumultous silence
ever seed, and Mr.. Gibson remarked
that he wondent impose the Republik
on no respectable man agin his wishes.
He then transferred me to the Finants
Committee, and sed he hoped we would
take immediate action, for the State had
no money, as we'll as himself, and board
was high and eat setaras frequent.
This may not hav been his exaktual
langwidge, but is. .anglin toward it. I
how'd my head and said, Ditto, exsep
that I don't eat seteras." Forthwith !
telegrafd varyous gentlemen for TEN,
porsry loan, but they woudent lend a