Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1866-12-13
90 i. = ~ ~ G~ alrlH I1Ih 9THW .
QD8io StattsrrIttiar,r.
NEW CHRISTM as STORIES, BY
CHARLES DICKENS. TN lf
The Railroad Refreshment Saloon
" and the Signalman. rH b..
NAN LrNE-TnE BoY AIT MuGpY. I

MAIN LINE-THE BOY AT MUGBY. .
am The Boy at Mugby. That's about
what l am. aa auUI 0a wuqr s-r.
You don't know what / mean? What a
pity! But | think you do. | think you
| must. Look here. / am the Boy at what is
called The Refreshment Room at Mugby.
! Junction., and what's prOudest boast is,
| that iU never yet refreshed a mortal being.
Up in q corner of the Down Refreshment
Room,at Mugby Junction, in the hight of
twenty-seven cross draughts Q've often
counted 'em while they brushed the first
class hair twenty-seygn waysl, behind the
bottles, among the glasses, bounded on the
nor'west by the beer, stood pretty far to
the right of metallic object that's at times
the tea urn and at times the soup-tureen,
according to the nature OF the last twang
! impaired to its contents, which are the
ground work, Tended off TO the traveller by
a barrierof stale sponge-cakes erected atop
of the counter and lastly exposed sideways
[ to the glare of Our Missis' eye-you ask
Boy so sitiwated, next time you stop in a
hurrya at Mugfy, tor anything to drink; you
take particular notice that he'll try to
seem not to hear you, that he'll appearn
absent maiiner to survey the Line through
a transparent medium composed of your
| head and body, and that he won't serve
you as long as you can possibly bear it.
That's mel
What lark tits! Weare the Model Es-
tabliihmeut. we are, at Mugby. Other He
ireshment Rooms send their imperfect
young ladies up to be finished of by our
Missis. For SOME of the young ladies,
when they're new to the business, come
into it mild! All Our Missis, she soon
takes that out of 'em. Why, | originally
come into the business meek myself. But
Our Mssis she soon took that out of me. z.
What a delightful lark tits! Il look upon
us Refreshmenters as ockipying the only
proudly Independent footing on the Line.
There's Papers, for instance-mv honor
able friend, if he will allow Inc to call him
so-him as belongs to Smits' ibookstall.-
| Why, he no more dares to be up to our re-
freshmenting games, than he dares to jump
atop Of a locomotive with her steam aC full
pressure, and cut away upon her alone,
driving himself at limited mail speed. Pa
pers, he'd get his head punched at every
compartment, first, second and third, the
whole length of train, if he was to ven
ture to initiate my demeanOr. It's the same
with the pOrters, the same with the guards,
the same with the ticket clerks, the same
the whole way up TO the secretary, traffic
manager, or the very chairman There
! amt one among 'em on the nObly inde-
pendent footing we are. Did yon ever
catch one Of them, when you wanted any
thing Of him, making system of survey
ing the Line through transparent medium
composed of your head aud bodyP l
should hope not.
! q You should see our bandolining room at
Mugby Junction. It's led to by the door
behind the counter which you'll notice
usually stands ajar, and it's the room where
| ;,si1 hon 10
lines their hair. You should see 'em at it,
betwixt trains, bandOlining away, as if
they was Amounting themselves for the.
combat, When yOn're telegraphCd, you
should see their noses all going up with
scorn, as If 1t was a part of the working of
the same Cooke and Wheatstone electrical
machinery. You should hear Our Missis
| give the word, "Here comes the beast to be
! fed !" and then you should see 'em indig-
nantly slipping across the line, from theup
i to the down, or wicer warsaw, and begin to
pitch the stale pastry into the plates, and
chuck the sawdust sSngwiches under the
glass covers, and get out thesha ha ha-
the sherry! Omy eye, my eye !-for your
refreshments. ,lr TE0 ~. alf lag
It's only in the aisle of the brave and
land of the free (by which of course mean
to say Britanna), that trefreshmenting so
eifecting; so 'olesome, so constitutional, a
checllupOn the public. There was a for
elgner, which having politely, with. his hat
| off, beseeched our young ladies and Our
Missis for "a leetel gloss hotf prarndee,"
and having had the line surveyed through
him by all and no other acknowledgment,
was proceeding at last to help himself as,
seems to be the custom in his own country,
when Our Missis with her hair almost
tpming un-bandolined with rage, and her
eyes omitting sparks, flew at him, cotched
the decanter out of his hand, and said, Put
| it down! won't allow that!m The for
eigner turned pale, stepped back with his
arms stretched out in front of him, his
hands clasped, and his shoulders riz, and
exclaimed, "Ah! Is it possible this! That
these disdaineous females and this fero-
cious old woman are placed here by the adj
ministration, not only to emposon the voy-
ayers, but to atfront them Great Heaven!
How arrives it? The English people. Or
| is he then slave? Or IDIOT" Another
time, a merry, wide-awake American gent.
had tried the saw7dust and spit it,out, and
phad tried the sherry and spit that out, and
[had tried in vain to sustain exhausted
'natur upon ibutter-scOtch, and had
been rather Cextra bandolined and
line-surveyed through, when, as the
bell was ringing, and he. paid Our
Missis, he says, very loud and good-tem-
pered, ~ tell Yew what tits, ma'arm. /
la'af. Theerl Ila'af. Dew. II oughter
ha' seen most things, for / hail from the
Onlimited side of the Atlantic Ocean, and
| haive travelled right slick over the Linn
tied, head on through Jee-rusa-lemm and
the East, and likeways France and Italy,
Europe Old World, and am now upon the
track to the Chief European Village; but
such an Institution as Yew, and Yewer
young ladies, and Yewer fiXin's solid and
liquid, atore the glorious Tarnal l never
die, see yet! And if. hain't found the
eighth wonder of monarchical Creation, IN
| finding Yew, and Yewer young ladies, and
Yewer fixins solid andliquid, all as afore-
said, established in a. country where the
people are absolute Loo-na-ticks, / am EX-
ira Double Darned with Nip and Frizzle
to the innermost grit! Wheerfur-Theert
/ la'afh / Dew, ma'arm! i la'afln And
so he went, stamping and shaking his sides,
along the platform all the way to his own
compartmeht -''A
Think it was, her standing up agin the
Foreigner, as giv' Our Missls the idea of
going over to France, and droripg eom7
parison betwiXt Refreshmenting as follow
ed among the trog-eaters, and Refresh
menting as triumphant in the Isle of the
Brave and Land of the Free, (bylwhioh of
course mean to say agin, Britannia). Our
\ young ladies', Miss Whit, Miss Piff and
! Mrs. Sniff, was unanimous opposed TO- her
! going; for, as they says to- Our Missis,rone
and all, it is we'll beknown to the heads of
the hertb as no other nation except Britain
4 has an idea of anythink, but above all Of
business. Why then should you tire your
i self toprove what is already dyprOvedp 2 Our