The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1866-08-30

me ". l.. courier, empoys specisi At'-
cultural editor. We give . Few Of his ADVICE
to new beginners 10 that line, directed as above:
The Best Time 10 Put in Rye: We asked an
old farmer once what was the best time to put
inrye? He looked It his watch and replied:
'This-is about my hour
Tho rye was imnediateiy put in.
All seasons are the same for putting in that
kind Of rye. .ss
To Make Your Stables Warm in Winter: Set
fire to them.
How TO Keep Corn: Corn is just coming in.
The best way to keep corn is in good corn
house. though some prefer to kept in their
systems-ls the suIcs. II they don't keep
corn they keep coRH'D.
The Best Hoes to Use: In planting OF hoeing
coln, use the ordinary hoes in common USE
Neither India rubber hose, nor cotton hose, nor
leather hose, would be of any account in a corn
field; no moro would one of HoK's eight cylin-
der presses nor the no hos Of surprise nor one
Of Keho's Indian clubs nor the tally hoes Of
the fox huntsr. @8 80 JLASsAa4' -".>
As to Holding Your PIow: Don't you try to
hold it out at arms length-you can't do it.
II you haven't pillow of your own. get out
an attachment ON your neixhbor's who owes
you; any justice-of ths-pcacs will tell you
whether you can HOLD it or not.
To Drain Lands: Drink whiskey, and spend
all your time At the village tavern city saloen
this will drain you of al your lands in short
time. bsiasss ~ - ts.. Il
To Make Stone Fence: Equal parts Of whis-
key and cider. This ia reciprocal stone fence;
the more you lay Of it the more it will lay
you. laas, ls ssiut 81 aisr eee
Easy Way to Draw Saw-logs: Daw them
on piece of paper with . crayon pencil. After
. little practice, you will be able TO draw the
largest kind Of saw-logs with ease.
Pork: Packing thread is Of no use in pack
ing pork. In curing hams the time varies-
Hams that have got trichp2 can't be cured Mt
all Salt is bettsr than any quack pills. syrups
or tinctures. II very salt, they cant be cured,
but if you have nothing else they. have to be
endured. Sailing hams is not a sinecurc but
swine-cure. ~sG 'r aaa. aia-
Cabbages: The soil around cabbages requires
deep stirring, for which you do not use spoon,
Turnips: The little fly that sometimes eats
your turnips will not suit you; therefore SCOT
your turnips. WV
Reaping Machines: These are Invaluable to
farmer, but there is one crop fo- which the era
die is preferable.
The Cable Cipher. -rfaA ras -rssn
Isay. Pete, loo yere- whar you gwoin lookin
so black?
Yah, yah! Wy SAM didn't seed you. Use
gwoin to do . little white-wushn chore and
mebby III look whittier when | come back
Watts de news up your way. Sam?
Nof1in much. Watts dis / heah bout de
Lantic Cable? Gwoin to make a go oh it, dis
time-a'n't dey. tink? s'' 1''+
Spec so-but dey charge too much.
Watts de tax?
Hundred dollars for twenty words or bout
five dollars woodland mitey short words too
-owny five letters to word.
My CORY! Sence de cables SO long I tnl
dey might afford longer words den dat. l don't
spec I'll patronizc dat line. Cost fortin to
tellagraff to my English friends, and tell 'em
I'm we'll.
That's so. Sam; but do you know dat Use
been tinkin bout dis cable = good deal OBJ late
leyin awake nights till my wool ached- and
now Use jest got = plan dat will circumvent de
cable folks. and make telIagraffin berry cheap.
Shaw. Pete! How you gwoin to do dat?
Simplest ting in de world, chile It's by wat
dey calls a sighfor. r
Wat! Sighforin? Figgers? Rule OBJ tree or
sumfin oh dat kind, Ell?
No. you fool. De sighfor mean am secret
for anudder. r
Wat coed would dat doy Why not let cherry
word stan far hsself? @
Now don't you 60 to boderin me wild yer
confuncterifsrous ignorant talk, Sam, else you
won't get anudder word out OBJ me. Shut yer
jaw, hold up yer ear, and mind wat I'm sayin
Now wen spose case.
Well-sposs you do, Pete.
Sposs you am big merchant. wutf cher so
much, sposs Iss anudder. You'm gwoin to
England, and isn't. Den you wish me to cor
respond to you froo do cable, to keep you post
cd on biznsss dis side de ocean, SO you'll know
how to make . spec on sumfin on fodder side
by gettin de fust news fustly-yer understan?
Uh-hu-ob course doz-so fur.
But eff tellagraf AL want to say, it'll cost
you bout all you'm wuff to pay fur all dem
stravgint words.
Uh-hu-I see, dux.
So-afors you go. ies guv yer private
sighfer BOOK, wild answers to all sorts Of bzness
questions in it; and bumby, when you in Eng
land. you gets tsllagraff from me, wild onny
one word-cost you Eve dollars--.Beans!
Beans? Wuts dat:
Yes beans OATS . sighfor. So yer looks
in de sighfor-booK, to see wut Beans means;
and ders you'll ind Beams stands opposite de
berry advice you wsnts--two or free hundred
words mebsy-tsllin you sackly how to finani.
cate. and savin you gobhs oh money,
Wut head yo'ss got. Pete! Gwoin to sell
yer plan to some rich white trash. reckon?
Uh-hu--I IS dat. Make hundred dollars,
SoSSSs 800 nrus zs2sas =
Couldn't lend me fifty cents afore you 60?
No. Onny got jes nuf to cross de nbber.
r. - . -