Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1866-02-28
our Omnibus gnaost.

BLACKS inhumanity to black makes
captured negroes mourn.
The largest aims house in the world
is the Freedmen's Bureau.
Why is kiss like Creation? Because
it is made Of nothing and is very good
If you were to loose your nose that
kind of one would you get? The first
that turned-up.o M
Why does a chicken three weeks,
three days and three hours old walk
across the road [? To get to the other
side.
THE New York Tines wants to know
= "what the omnibus and car drivers will
do for overcoats when the Government
supply is worn out? "
"a MAN who'll maliciously set fire to
q barn." said Mr.. Slow, and burn up
twenty COWS, ought to be kicked to death
by q jackass, and I'd Ike to do it."
AN exchange informs us that Basil
Duke, who furnished the rebel marauder
John Morgan with brains, is in Cincin-
natl engaged in the produce and com
mission business.
A YOUNG window, on being asked why
she was going to get married so soon
after tae death Of her first husband re-
piled, 1 do it to prevent fretting myself
to death on account of dear Tom"
A LADY asked minister whether a
person might be fond of dress and orna-
ment without being proud " Madam, u
said the minister, "when you see a fox's
tail peeping out Of the hole, you may be
sure the fox is within"
A DOWN east editor was in boat when
the wind blew hard, but he was not at
all alarmed, because he had his life in
sured, and said he never had anything
happen to him by which he could make
any money"
A. HoTEL-KEEPER in Iowa was so
deeply disgusted by fhe conduct of a
sleigbing party which put up at his house
that heitook down his sign next morning
and quit the business. Seems like bit
ing ones own nose off for spite.
A YOUNG widow, who had married an
old man, was forever speaking of my
first husband" The second husband,
at last gently demonstrated. guess,
said the young wife, pouting, "you'll
Wantme to remember you when you are
dead and gone !"
JOHNNY, standing in the door the
other day, saw COW in the street. Said
he, 'tPa, what kind of COW is thatwith
out horns2" tSWhy, Johnny, she is a
moOley COW" Presently she turned
around and Johnny's quick eye dis
covered her tail was gone. Why Pa,
said he, she is mooley at both ends "
A REMARKABLE discovery is reported
in Italy by which two persons may con-
verse by telegraph, recognizing even the
sounds of each others voice! There
was something Of the kind in operation
between New York and Boston several
years ago, but it was given up in conse-
quence OF. the New York operator
breath being unpleasantly charged with
a combination Of bad gin and powerful
onions.
THE Western Christian Advocate says
that when Philip Phillips sang " Home,
Sweet Home" at missionary meeting
in Baltimore, one excellent brother, who
is a tobacconist, was so much affected
that he crowded his way to Mr.. Phillips
and told him to come next day to his
store and he should have the best box of
cigars in the establishment. Mr. Phillips
was obliged to decline with thanks, as he
does not use the weed in any form.
Mrs. SENATOR SPRAGUE.-The leader
Of fashion this winter in Washington is
Mrs. Senator Sprague, the only ladywho,
when she gives ball, builds ballroom
expressly for the occasion and removes
it the next day and well she might, for
the Government and Congress have been
at work for year or two in getting up a
tariff to suit the views of the Sprague
family generally, and the Rhode Island
Senator in particular, and millions of
dollars have the cotton lords pOcketed
by it.