davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

An Irish girl was ordered to hang the
wash-cloths on the horse III the kitchen
to dry. Her mistress shortly after found
very gentle family horse standing in the
kitchen completely covered with the ar
ticles that had been washed that day
Upon interrogating the girl the reply was,
"Oeh, to be sure, you told me to hang the
clothes upon the horse in the kitchen,
and the baste is the kindest [ ever saw,
sure"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Gov. Orr, of South Carolina, thinks it
hard that he and his brother rebels, since
they have taken oashs to support the Con-
stitution aud maintain the Union, are
looked upon with distrust The Govern
or manages to forget that he and his set
took such oaths before, when they did
not mean to keep them. When men are
known to have committed perjury they
out to be modest in urging their claims to
credence
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
q ueaNv Incnma.

The income return Of Jay Cooke, ESD,
the well known banker, made this year
upon his profits for 1865, was over $685.
0G0. On this his tax will be something over
100000. He resides in Cheltenham town
ship, Montgomery county. This will
most likely be the heaviest income return
made by any person in Pennsylvania the
present year.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
Judge Russell, of Iron County. Nc,

Judge Russell, of Iron County, Nc,
produced from single grain of wheat
stock of seventy FIVE stalks, averaging
twenty-niae grains each, or an aggregate
of two thousand one hundred and seventy
five grains. Were bushel and a half
(the ordinary quantity) to be sown on an
acre, and to produce in the proportion
this grain has done, the yield would be
eight thousand two hundred and sixty
two and half bushels on the acre.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

off there is any thing hate, it is a
woman with lap dog | always want
to drown it and pat a baby in its place"
says cruel Fanny Fern forgetting that
too often the lap dog owners feel the same
way but take the dog because they can't
get the baby. Shouldn't be so hard on
the sex, Fanney, because you've done a
little something for your country.-Bos-
ton Post.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
Coal.

Anthracite coal was first used in this
country in the Wyoming Valley, by two
Connecticut blacI,smiths, in 176S-69,
but it was not till 1903 that it was used
for domestic purposes in the common
CRATE. In that year Judge Fell, of
Wilkesbarrc, recorded the fact he had
made the experiment Of burning the com
mon stove coal Of the valley in common
replace and found it answering all the
purposes of fuel.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
Minnesota Wheat Crops.

The first bushel of wheat grown in
Minnesota was raised in 1929. From this
small beginning the wheat crop of the
State has increased in 1868 to 10000, 600
bushels, and the crop to be harvested the
present year is estimated at 100000
bushels.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The question, does getting drunk ever
advance ones happiness? would seem to
be put arrest by an Irishman who went
counting when drunk, and was asked
what pleasure he found in whisky? "Oh,
Nelly, its treat entirely, to see two of
your swate purity faces instead of one J"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Over S333, 600 have thus far been sub
scribed in the city of New York for the
relief of the sufferers by the Portland
conAagration in Chicago, $1,000.
Stewart's Fifth Avenue residence will
cost 81 100000.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Sambo was hacking away at tough
oak, when lightning struck tree near
by him, and shyered it. "Um," said he.
Il jes like to see um try dis once. l
reckon dey find dere match ~
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

a man came home drunk on cold
night and vomited in basket containing
goslings, which his wife had placed be-
fore the fire, upon seeing which he ex-
claimed, Goodness gracious, wife, when
did I swallow them things?'
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
Too Late.

A young lady stepped into the store of
a merchant by the name of Wade, and
very innocently said she would like to be
lcctghed (Wade) ''Really, l am very
sorry" said he, "but my wife will tell
you that you are too late by a couple of
years"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The public are cautioned not to take
any bills Of the Passaic County Bank,
Paterson, n. j., in which the Presidents
name is mutilated. Such bills have been
redeemed, cancelled and stolen and will
not be paid by the bank.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Two men fired at an eagle-at the same
time, and killed him. An Irishman OBJ
served, "They might have saved their
powder and shot, for the fall would have
killed him"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

A horticulturist advertised that he
would supply all sorts of fruit trees and
plants, especially pie-plants of all kinds.
A gentleman thereupon sent him an or
der for Que package of custard pie seed,
and dozen minee- pie plants.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The following is copy of bill post
ed on the wall of country village "a
lecture on total abstinence will be deliver
ed in the open air, and a collection will
be made at the door to defray expenses" +"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The wife and daughter of New York
er boarding ut Union Hall, Saratoga, were
robbed of diamonds aud ieweiry worth
5000 last week.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

An Illinois chap, in describing gale
of wind, says: "a white dog, while at
tempting to weather the gale, was caught
with his mouth open, aud turned com
pletely inside out"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

A little sohool-boy in Shirley, Mass,
was buried in fun in a sand hole by his
companions, few days ago, He was
dead when his teacher dug him out.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Why is the tolling of bell like the
prayer of hypocrite? Because 1T is a
solemn sound by thoughtless tongue.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

"I'm oa the trail of deer" as the fol-
low said when he stepped on the dress OF
beauty in the street.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The greatest nutmeg ever known met
with crater.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

Marrying woman for her beauty is like
eating bird for its singing.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

The Cairo Democrat thus poetizes th'
latest agony of hoops :
"These hoops are like the poet Gray;
This you at once can see;
For they, US Gray did, show the world
A handsome LEG"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
An Incident on Broadway.

One of these sunny March afternoons
when the sky is blue and soft as sap
phire, and the air full of balm, the spire
of Grace Church tipped with sunset gold
and the plate-glass palaces along Broad
way all glitter as they reflected the silk
en- robes of the hurrying throng is
our scene and time
She was just released from her weary
days work in the sitting book bindery-
the care worn, thread bare woman, and
she breathed in the fresh air greedily
as she edged her way meekly amid her
scornful sisterhood. Suddenly she paus-
ed in front of fruit stand, the tropical
gleam of golden oranges reminded her of
the little white face, that was wasting "a
way on the lonely pillow at home, and she
fingered her worn purse longingly.
"Have you any one cent oranges, sir?"
eve don't deal in one-cent customers
better go about your business, woman"
said the man contemptuously.
ooh, the heart sickness of poverty -
She had proceeded but few steps be-
fore she stopped, involuntarily before a
display of cut flowers It was not the
dazzling camelias nor the imperial pink
azaleas that attracted her eye it was the
knot of wild violets blue and dewy, like
those that grew under the old apple tree
at home, when she was girl. How lit
tie pining Willie's eyes would sparkle at
the sight of those blue violets
GLOW much are these violets 2" She
asked with strembling eagerness.
oh IL =, L., Il,
he did not believe the faded looking wo-
man would be a customer, and was vexed
at being interrupted in eulogizing to a
splendily dressed lady some rare hot-house
blossoms.
She turned away with weary sigh,
but the lady had noticed her wan face
with plying kindness.
"Give me the wild flowers" said she
and then touching the wouan's shoulder,
she added, ''Take these violets-you seem
to wish for them so much p
The plae face lighted up All, it was
worth a shilling to call forth such smile!
"Thank you, lady, it was for my little
boy (; he is dying!"
Dying-it was strange fancy to the
jeweled child Of luxury. She could not
imagine it in all the glow of sunshine
and vitality that surrounded her, and yet
it struck warning chill to her heart
Dying to think that people could die
x X \
"Oh, mother they are so beautiful
Put them where | can look at them all
the time-they make me think Of lovely
Greenwood. +"
And then midnight came, the little
child set out on his far journey to the
many mansions of his Fathers house,
smiling upon the violets with his last
earthly glance. The broken hearted moth
er could shroud him in no glistening satin
or costly lace but when the little pine
coffin came, she sprinkled the blue eyed
fragrant blossoms upon his breast and so
laid him down to his everlasting slum-
bers.
Did the Recording Angel write down
no history of that brief incident in his
book of light All, the day will come
when riches are no longer of any avail,
and that one deed of kindness will be
more precious to the daughter of wealth
than all Galconda's diamonds
lie needs no more weary watching now,
that sick and suffering child he is gath
ering the violets that grow along the riv-
ers of Paradise se-LJe Illustrated
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
CONNECTIONS Westward.

The MORNING TRAIN from New York
connects at MANUNKA CHUNK with the
train leaving Philadelphia (Kensngton De-
poi) at : 30 q. u,., and Great Bend with the
through Mail Train on the Erie Railway,
with sleeping car attached, stopping at all
the principal stations on that road, and arri-
wing al ,}nffdlo q; 10 o. IN.
Tie Egening Train from New York con-
meets at Manunka Chunk with the train lea
wing Philadelphia (Kcnsing Depoi) at-3 80
p. m; arrives at Scranton at II 30, where it
remains till 1928 Gext morning, when it
leaves, arriving al Great Bend at IL 55 p. m.,
connecting with the day Express on the
Eric Railway.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
One cf the RuOYs.

A man stopping his paper recently
wrote -
Il think folks doant ort to spend thare
mummy on papers, my father never did an
evry boldly scd he wos thee smartest in
the kountree, and had got the intellygen-
ist family Of buoys that ever dug taters. "
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
. UNDERTAKING IN ALL IT'S BRAN

~ ches.
Particular attention will be given to this
branch of the subscribers business. He will
always study to please and consult the
wants and wishes of those who employ him.
From the number of years experience he has
had in this branch of business he cannot and
Will not not be excelled either in city or
country. Prices one-third less than is usual
ly charged, from 80 to IS finished Coffins al
ways on hand. Trimmings to suit the best
Hearse in the country. Funerals attended
at one hours notice. ]. Ii. MCCARTHY.
May II, 1S66.-tf.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
Eastward.


The Morning Train from Great Bend con
meets there with the Cincinnati Express on
the Erie Railway from the West at Manun-
ka Chunk with train for Phiade,dhia and
intermediate stations, arriving in PhiIadel-
piIia at Csc p. m; and at New Hampton
with 4 train fer Easton. Bethlehem, Allen
town, Reading and Harrisburg, arriving at
Harrisburg at $50 ?. N.
The Eseding Train from Great Bend con-
meets there with the New York Express on
the Erie Railway from the West at Manun-
Ia Chunk y ilh : train which runs TO Belvi-
ierc, where il lies ever until o'clock the
next morning and at New Hampton with an
Express Train for E4sron, Bethlehem, Al
lcntown, Reatiug and Harrisburg.
Al Scranton, connections are made with
trains on the Lackawanna and B!oomsburg
Railroad to and from Piiiston, Kingston,
Wilkesbarre. Berwick, Bloomsbury, Danville
Northumberland, Harrisburg and interme-
date stations,.0 and with trains on the Della
ware and Hudson Railroad to and from Car
bondaie and intermediate stations.
WATTS COOKE, Superintendent.
II. 4. HENRI 7, General Ticket Agent.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02

This Solution when properly used, effect
ually prevents fermentation or decay OF
Fruits. and, by the most simple and mex
pensiye process, every variety nay be kept
in a fresh and perfectly wholesome condi-
tion the year round. It is nc new and un-
certain experiment, but has been in practi-
cal use for the past eight years, yet has been,
for the most part, kept from the public for
the purpose Of ascertaining The result OF
series Of experiments, al' of which nave prov
ed the validity of al that Is now conf
IDENTITY claimed for ii.
Fruits preserved by this Solution are
good as the best canned" fruits, while the
use OF the Solution avoids the trouble of seal
ing. costly jars CT cans, keeping from the air
and light, frequent examinations, and the
many other troubles and anaoyunces we'll
known to every hou-cojf lie.
L. Il SFEAR, Patentee.
/. p. Wo8aAL1., General Agent, 10. 81
Hudson St, II. Y.
PGIcE 81 per bottle.
from JAleEs Il. Cn11roY & Co. tie Cele-
5ratc3 analytical Chemists, Ncs0 York;
Having made numerous experiments with
Mr. Lewis II. Spears Fruit-Presergjpg So
luton, We are enabled 10 state that it will
prevent the decomposition OF fruits when
used IN the manner described by hIa. The
prepared fruits upon wtichw we exPerimented
had been mixed with The Solution, and were
found to resist all attempts to generate fer
mentation There IS nothing IL the nature
Of this Solution wIllch, when absorbed by
the fruits, can act in Il manner TO render them
unwholesome.
JAS. R. Chiffon & CO,
Analytical Chemists.
Sold at Wholesale and Retail by
DREHER & BROTHER, Druggists.
STRoUDsBURG, Pa,
Agents for Dfonroe County.
o. Merchants supplied at manufacturers
prices A sample OF fruit put up last fall
with this Solution, may be seen at our Store.
June 7, ISG6-6mo. ID. d b.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1866-08-02
IF YOU WANT A GOOD MELODEON,

IF YOU WANT A GOOD MELODEON,
from one of the best makers in the Uni
ted States, solid Rosewood Case, warranted
5 years, call at MCCARTY'S, he would es-
pecially invite all who are good judges OF
Music to come and test them. He will sell
you from any maker you wish, $40 less than
those who sell on commission. The reason
is he buys for cash and sells for the same,
with less than one-half the usual per centage
that agents want. ]. FL. MCCARTHY.
May II, IS66.-tf.
The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-09-14
The Southern LoYalist Convention.

We publish an abstract Of the resolutions.
and the address TO the people sdopted by the
Southern Loyalist Convention, which was held
ct Phila,ielphis last week. The, rssqlutioub
were presented by GQvsraor IINmil.os sfrsasa
and the addres, b. Senator, crssuslk Of Mary
land. t..,,',,. .,,...o,, ,,,i,r.,,,,
tn. first thanks God for the rfunph.at end
Of the Union on the fewest conditions comp~ti-
BILE with loyal security. The Sd calls "my
policy" unjust. oppressive and W tnlerahle, And
says restoration under Il will augment the per-
lis of the position. The 9th thanks Congress
endorses Il and che atnendment.' aud regtet'
that Congress did not preside ,tsrl greater -
curity Of people not yet admitted tn Represent
alton. The 5,h says thst Congress Is not ex
ecutiye. but ha, power over rest1rHtion.l Th'
9th says there is M right Of any kind to secede
and. whcR secession takes place. r~bcls subject
themselves To be treated rs conquered alien
under the laws OF war. The 7th says Of nj
men, OF all races, ought TO have accorded I,
them all that their intelligence, energy ant
views may entitle them to attain. The 9Th say,
The present state governments are not iegiti-
mate until they are recognized by Coneress
The 9th Iaysa tribute, to Lincoln. The l0tl
declares IN favor ~ universal liberty the worl,
over .,and the Inherent right Of all men 10 "
eide tor themselves, The ilth. thanks soldier
and sailors for services during the war, AM
says the party will stand by them. TIE l2tl
considers the Union rs the primary object o
all patriotic men. .....r .....". ia.
The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-09-14

laOsE on the PRESIDENTS ArroiSrRrs.-
Nsv York Tribune receives The following In
teligence from its Washington correspondent.
We are told thai the official psrdon-brokcr re.
ferred to is Secretary Browning. and that the
statement Is entirely correct and may be easily
proved, except as to the amount Of the bride.
Mr.. Drowning Is known to have received 81 900
for shielding the murderers Of our Maine boys
The following transaction Of an g. ASfe,
In his capacity OF = Pardon Broker, snAs' just
come To light. II will be remembered that
Corporal W. G Corbett and pri,ates Emory
Smith and Mason Brown. all OF the LIST Maine
Veteran Volunteers, were set upon and mur-
derc,i in cold blood while on guard over Gov.
eminent property, on the Sth Of October last.
at Browns Ferry, Savsnnsh River, by j. Craw-
ford Keys, Robert Keys and F. G. Stowers aud
C.. Brsem. They weeItfied and convicted by
o Military ,Commission appointed BY Gen, Sick
les, and all we're sentenced TO be executed. In
the esse Of the last three the President ordered
the sentence to BE- suspended, and II was then
committed TO imprisonment for lite, and Gen
s,ekles. Who hal been overruled TO secure this
part Of the sentence. sent the prisoners To the
bry TortugAs. Through the influence Of one
Torkins, sxerted upon the aforesaid official.
anil pardon broker, they have been secretly
transferred to Fort Delaware, and from thence
arc to be quietly removed 10 Fort Lafayette,
preparatory to q speedy rslsxses'itis assested
BY those privy to ihe whole matter, that the
prisoners, who are quite wealthy have through
their Attorney Topkius. paid the official sAa
pardon broker spoken of, the sum Of $4,000
for hi, influence with the President In securing
the release 81 the prisoners. .'
The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-09-14
OUR ELECTION.

On Monday We met the, enemy and buried
him. ,r,,a, al "a !u...f..gr., 4,
Elsewhere win be found the in.srsting par
ticulsrs Of this tremendous victory. We have
never known so little personal feeling against
candidates rs characterized this election-all
the loyal guns being pointed at the man who
has betrayed his country into the hands Of the
hordss who fought to destroy Il. and his policy
Of ruin while shs ooppsrhesds bad more than
they could b.to act solely on the defensive.
They have met their Gettysburg. and the hero
who 50 gallsntly costrtboted to the rebel defeat
Of July ID 1853. again led loyal men Of Maine
TO overturn the cennon enemy. o..
The lesson Of this crushing. overwhelming
defeat Of his supporter. Andrew johnson must
learn whether he wilior no. Well will Il be
for him II he heeds Il. if II Is not nov toe late ]
lie has sowu the wind and shall reap the uhiri
wind. lie has betrayed the cause for which the
people fought, handing them over into, the
hands OF the rebels, and the great victory 10
Maine Is the result Of the intense desire Of every
loyal man in the State to hurl his indignation
against such base trcachery. lie has traduced
and maligned the representatives Of the peo-
pie, and those whom they represent have risen
In their might to rcbuke the usurper Of their
rights, and protect them. Perhaps he has count.
ID what Il will cost him in his efforts to destroy
those who were powerful enough to destroy the
rebel armies but this much Is eertain-it will
cost him and all bis supporters instant and ut
ter annihla,ion whenever the people can have
chance to pass upon them. .......
Mrs. Partington's attempt TO staythe oceans
tide with her broom, was no more futile ef
fo,t than Andrew Johnson's endeavor to crush
those Who trusted him and crushed the REBEL.
ion. The Republican party Of the country is
the only party that a. unit fought down tres-
con. To-day II is stronger than IL ever was,
not because II Is party, but because IL seek,
to secure the right. Of the people. audit the fruits
Of thew dearly earned victories. Andthe tidal
va,e % indignation OF "my policy" Of a
loyal determination To adjust the terms OF set.
tiemsot With traitor, that there shall be ne
! trouble hereafter. begun in New Hampshire
increased In Connecticut, still increased BY tn,
gallant Green Mountain State, and now swollen
tos food In Maine, will sweep over every loys
State. aud shos the iphmous traitor Of III,
peoples rights who occupies the White House
that the Constiistioa 70 INDEED safe In the PEG
pies hands. but The man who a.urps the pow
srs delegated to their Representatives % not
Thirty thousand loyal greetings to gu,
loyal brethren Of all the other States =, q
God bless this Commonwealth.
The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-09-14
A GOOD TINE TO WEED OUT.

The coprerheads cannot now utter thei'
usual cry that the money and Offices Of the
Administration have defeated them for al
this has been used to defea. the Rrpubii.
cans. We have lost perhaps in this county
ten votes, which have been thus bought
but that loss has been more than quadrupl
ell by genuine democratic votes. We ruth
or lkethis. A few have Peddled out, and
the Republicans bid them cheerful adieu
simply STIMULATING that they never will
conc back. We do no, envy their feel.
'ings-,heir owners despisins them ths,
they could he bought, and the door gladly
closed behind them by their former ascot
ntes which Is forever barred to them. Make
yourselves easy Us you can, gentlemen. for
you are spotted men hereafter, with post.
office leprosy that nothing hut Almighty
power can ever heal. "Those that liz
down with dogs must rise up with feas,'
and the Maine election is pretty large flea
in Somebody's ear. $50" ''".., D
The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1866-09-14
THE UNIONe&, J0URNAL,

Z; ..,en. s,m she - dhsh" which they
had bed 50 oaen, ensisped lp Vermont
and siaiss ", as shsy fanesed they saw
day light and were preparing to emerse, tho
,hunderbolt of the peoples indignation
struck them. and hurled them back nxain!-
Let these citizens Of the "last ditch" re-
main satisfied !hsttoy them thueTisno ns'
direction and restoration to public favor
The clarion notes Of victory SO galaiSly
sounded in the East, reverberatc over hill
and dale throughout this broad land, anl i
but foreshadowing Of the great uprising
Of the people tina, shall strike terror int
the hearts Of traitors and their allies. Amen
aud amen! r..,' ! h.." "'