Prescott journal. [volume] (Prescott, Wis.) 1861-1871, 1866-09-01
MISCELLANY.


are known as GROWERS" tells these
stories:
'OuIy once did / ever hear of &
GToWler who made himself completely
master of the situation, and obtained
ransom from the poor creature IN his
vehicle by eerintellectual superiority.
Young Augustus fOliamDo of our club
who spells his name with number
of little 'fs-was the victim, and conf
ded the story to me with tears In his
eyes upon the very night of the occur
renee. The poor lad Is very fond OF
finding his legs under the mahogany OF
persons of title, and had been asked to
dine that evening with live marquis,
for the first time. Though bent on this
exquisite pleasure, however, ttfOjambe
had a frugal mind; since st. James
Square was only few streets from his
own lodgings, he would not hire a
broHgham, even for SO mOmentOus an
occasion, but took "A 'grumbler' from
the ranks. The Marquis of RattafAt,
No. 999 st. James Square, said he, IN
magnificent voice, and leaned back In
the crazy vehicle as though it had been
a cOrTOnetted chariot with patent
springs. The mention of his titled host
was quite unnecessary, and as it turned
ont. cost the poor fellow as much as
brougham would haze done, besides
much mental agony: for, from his exal-
ted manner. the astute driver gathered
that MIR. flfOljambe was about TO par
take of his lordship's hospitality for the
first time, and would wish, above all
things, to enter his mansion In grace
fui and unembarrassed manner; and the
1911, N1~l- he annarglTu
son arriving lin about 2 minute and
half at No. 999, Cabby put his head
In at the window, and demanded five
shillings. My poor friend, looking in
an apprehensive manner mp at the
stately mansion, exclaimed: Nonsense
but hastily prOtiered haif-a crown
HereupOn, Cabby swiftly ran up the
steps and administered a laundering
double knock, which summoned three
hamingO like fOOtmen, besides per-
feet gentleman in PLAIN clothes. 'YOu
scOundrelr cried fffOliambe IN a stage
whisper, mere is your five shillings;
but / have got your number.
''My fare is half a-soveTeign now, sit,
and don't leave this house until L get
It," answered Cabby In a most deter
mined tone. Aud he did get it fffOl-
jambe paid about shilling yard for
that little drive; and his LOrdship's
butler and three lackeys thought
him very mean fellow alter all, and
quite unfit to be a guest OF their master
to be disputing with cabmau about
paltry sixpence.
This achievement of Cabby'S was
undoubtedly great coup; but its CON
ceptiOn did not require much agility of
mind, aud it success was due to logged
determination rather than to any bril-
liant parts. A Hanson cabman would
probably have recognized little fffo.iam
he's character at glance, whereas this
four-wheeled individual was doubtless
indebted to luck that he did not make a
mistake in his man. The idea itself
was not original. A brother Jehu once
tried the very same trick upon a subtle
lawyer of my acquaintance, and made
the saddest fdScO of that affair. My le-
gal friend, although disciple of Adam
Smith, had, In consideration of its be-
ing a wet night, offered siXpence extra
as he emerged from the Grumbler in
full diniug costume. That's not my
fare, cried the wretch taking care TO
let the foOtmeu hear him.
"'YOu are right, my friend, returned
the baTrister. GIVE me back the half
crown, and, here's flOTin for you in
stead; that's Your right fare
"IIl rouse the hOuse-I'H knock the
door down. exclaimed the cabman fu-
riOusly.
= with all my heart" answered the
mau of law; ut is neither my house nor
my door"
WhereppOn, the disappointed one,
who, worse than vauitIng ambition, had
OerFeached himself, and fallen on the
wrong man, drove calculating away.
No; the drivers OF Grumblers have
no wit; their Jokes are only practical.
A SexagenarIan writes to the Times to
say that be was about to cross the street
the previous day when an empty four
wheeled cab made at him furiOusly,
(which before had been going at a foot
pace) and that he very narrowly escaped
being run over. The policeman to
whom he complained, assured him that
it was very favOrite little game with
drivers TO procure fares. Either they
are determined to get them dead or
alive flor of course they would take the
body to the hospitaD or else tuis prac-
tice is merely vent for the cynicism
OF their natures, which, IN the case OF
their more intelligent brethren, Is ex-
pended al repartee.
THAT bOth classes do behave exceed
ingly Ill to women and fOreigneTs-tO
all. 10 fact, upon whom they eau impose
lis. certainly true. The ideas that the
great TeutOnic race In particular, have
imbibed fthese men land doubtless not
merely ont of their moral conscious
ness but from sad experienced are, as
/ happened to discover, Of the most
alarming kind. A gentleman of Prus
STA came over to stay with me some
weeks ago, and arrived In a Hanson
cab.
"'He did bring me safe, cried be will
his full face beaming through ms spec
tacles, and has nothing from me stolen.
"'Of course not, said 4. Why dlG
you apprehend any such misfOrtunes?
"'Ha, hap exclaimed he with joyful sa
gacity; Il do know them, those cal
drivers of yours; they ilItreat, they rob
but see, have his name and number
rightly taken. Ndppin: II C0THkiE CITY
Ir0ry Balance Handle Cheese KHiDes
finest STEEL
The poor deluded man had copie'
the advertisement upon the splash
board; and it was difficult to persuade
him TO abandon his fools paradise o
security, although / assured him tina
hes might Just as well appeal to th
Prussian Constitution against COun
Bismarck.
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