The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1866-04-21
THE LIVE SOFA.
A MAN OF MANY HAGARLES.

though made rich since by large legacy he
was not in condition to enjoy it. The TACT is,
= MIR. Lundy was q confirmed by pochondriac.
For many years Mrs. Lundy had stayed at
home and bumored his whims; but one season
her pretty daughters wanted to go to water
ingplace, not for any disease in particular, but
to see the world aud the young Iolks In it.
Behold them, then, comfortably established
in seaside hotel. For two days Mr. Lundy
q had been all right; but one morning his poor
4 wife knew what was coming, by the popularity
n of his looks and motions Her book fell from
a her hand; Minnie turned pale.
Hes been fighty all the morning." said Mrs
. Lundy YD
"A feather, my dear-a feather; catch me-
j hold me. Don't you see the wind Is blowing me
everywhere II will take me out to sea, and
shall get saturated yes, wet through Mrs.
Lundy. / beg you to catch me; pin me to your
bonnet; | shall be safe there. Jsst see how
agitates me throughout I'd rather be any
I thing than this; do put me in your bonnet, my
DEAR"
'Pn put you in a mad-house before long,
muttered the exasperated wife, eff you cut up
such capers. Come into the hotel, Mr.. Lundy."
Come into the hotel madaml-You talk as ii
had legs; Did you ever see a feather walk
Why, I'm lighter than a snow.drifr; wish 1
\ had brick in my hat to keep me down. All
1 envy everything stationary. Observe how l
culver; stick pin in me, my dear, and fasten
me to the floor. Is there enough of me for o
pen Am a hen-feather, or duck-feather or
what?"
"Goosefeatber, if anything, you tiresome
mortal cried his wife. "Im sick Of your vaga-
4 ries. First, you're q cat ON the roof, mewing
and keeping everybody awake; then you're
4 glass bottle, full OF water, freezing and snap
\ ping; you're anything. and everything but
& reasonable man. I'm tired of it,"
Mrs. Lundy, soM you have the goodness to
81 put me in your pocket? squeeze me in your
hand, anything, chat ! may feel safe in your
protecting care? I'm floating (singing).
"'Im afoat, Pm afoat-ah what's that ?"
"Nothing, MIR. Lundy, but Joe's whip
called him from the coach-house Lay on, Joe"
but, my love- my legs"
Nonsense, Mr.. Lundy Lay on, Joe. Fea-
Liners haven't got legs"
True, Mrs. L., but they have marrow, and
that's what feels. Pray beg Joe to STOP
Just then ran up little Tom-the only male
Ihope of the Lundy family-and strange to say,
in his hand handsome hens feather. A tri-
umphant smile lllumined the face of Lundy the
elder.
d. ''Now my DEAR" he said, gravely taking the
= feather in his hand, II hope you'll believe me.
My child, look on that feather, and be thankful;
~ that was me-"
And little Tom, chuckling at the idea ran up
and down the piazza, repeating merrily-
"A PA was hen once; dear me- how funny!"
Minnie Lundy was captivating; there is no
a doubt about that. In pink, blue, white, or green
she looked equally charming. There were rich
men there who would have been glad to charm
her, and nice men, and silly men-silly to that
81 extent that they wei e fools, and didn't know it.
" But it happened that a young physician was
luckier than them all, and poorer. "I must
"A have that girl" he said soto uoce dozen times
day, and then heartily wished she had fever.
81 He was very handsome. Probably he saw Minnie
through the back OF his head, tor he was always
looking out of the window when she came in,
and al ways blushed violently.
One day Minnie followed her mother into the
parlor. As usual, DR.. Stag was there.
"My DEAR" cried Mrs. Lundy, who had lust
come from the garden, "you look excited"
20 mamma !"-and her voice was so sweetly
low, SO softly agitated-"we shall have to leave
this place. indeed we shall. Father is taking on
T. terribly; some OF the boarders are laughing
Others are shocked"
Sand what is the freak now, my dear ?n
"Ol he's rooster, and crows till he is black
Il in the face"
ga rooster horrible And here we are-not
Somebody wheeled round from the window.
"Madam, heard you speaking of-the-ahem
need OF doctor Excuse my forwardness
= but am physician"
H. OF course, Minnie was more beautiful than
- ever in her confusion.
S 'My poor husband has an unfortunate ten
dency that annoys everybody near him."
# "Perhaps he is a hypochondriac. think
have seen him. Where is he, madam?n
"OI the north porch said Minnie.
"And am sure we are very much obliged,
added the mother eff you can only help HIM.
~ Tie first sound that struck their ears, as they
issued from the door, was grand and sonorouf
''cock-a-dOo-dle-do!
"Johr-Mr. Lundy," cried his wife, "what
=. sad spectacle you are making of YOURSELF
VI "pm not a spectacle, good woman: pm
rooster. Get out of my Way-do you not motto
the expanse of my wings? Cock-adoo-dledo !"
"What shall we OF" cried the poor wife
turning to the doctor, 80, sir, can you stol
this ridiculous exhibition ?"
''Trust me, madam" said the young man
~ biting his lip, tor the sight was almost to-
I ridiculous for his gravity.
Upon my word," he continued, addressin
.4 the deluded man, what magnificent creature
Why, his feathers are yard long. Where di
ri you get such splendid specimen? Is he in
portedr'
"Cock-adoo.dledo! yelled the human biped
strutting more tha1 ever. That woman ha
nothing to do with me, sir-nothing at all TT
rooster on my own account-cock-a-dOo-dl
doo."
Here the doctor gave orders aside 20 one (
the servants, who went aTeY grinntpg. pheI
turning to the rooster, who was by this time re
in the face with exeftion, be SAID
81 declare It makes my mouth water 10 thin
what capital dinner that bird would furnis
May wiring his neck, madam IL will tai
but few aeoondeif hf
mo you doD't,n cried the other, "Tm toue
@ Pm very tough--Im an old bird, sir-not to
caught with chaf."
''But you are srooster; what else are you goC
for"
''Good to crow, sir; good to crow" aud fort
with ensued the loudest screech of all, su
W Seeded by summersault and a sensation of 81
location. Another moment, aud the serVa
reappeared with q dead fowl in his arms
III 81 assure you, sir, II had to be done,n said tl
doctor, gravely. and Mr.. Lundy rubbed his ia
and pinched his throat.
"Did you really wiring my neck, sir 2" Il
hypochondriac asked grayely.
"When you we're a rooster, certainly
"Did / die game ?n asked the other, with
manner of solemn Importance.