The daily clarion. [volume] (Meridian, Miss.) 1863-1866, 1866-02-15

What would pig do if he wanted
habitation He would tie knot IN his
tail and call it pig-stye.
O. What is amusement! a. Setting
dog at a chinaman; tying two cats to-
gether by the tail; cutting a girls DOH
open and letting the saw dust out or
anything else that makes you feel good,
California Paper.
They tell story in New London
Conn, which runs thus " a green gro
Ger in Groton sent his clerk to New Lon
don, one morning last summer, with a
bag of green corn to dispose of. The
young man was gone all day, and at
night returned with his bag Of green corn
on his shoulder, and dumped 1t on the
floor, with the remark "There's your
green corn; 90 and sell it YOURSELF
can't Why said the grocer, haven't
you sold any 2 Sold any No said
he, 1--WE been all over New London with
it, and no body said anything about
green corn Two or three fellows asked
me what I'd gotin my bag, and | told
'em twas none of their ID business
A little girl was told after being a
spectator at funeral, that it was only the
body which was laid in the ground. The
body !" she replied with some perplexity,
"what do they do with the legs Z"
The best time tew sett hen IL when
the hen il ready, | kant tell you what
the best breed IL, but the Shanghigh IL
the meanest. 1t kosts az much tew
board one az it duz stage boss, and yu
might az well undertake tew fat fan
ming mill, running oats thru 1t. There
amt no profit in keeping hen for his
eggs, if he laze loss than one a day. Hens
are very long lived, if they don't kontract
the throat disease; there IL great many
goes to pot every year by this mellan-
kolly diseaze. kant tell eggsactly how
few pick out good hen, but as gen
eral thing the long-eared ones, | kno, are
the least apt tew skratch up the garden.
Eggs pack ed in equal parts ov salt and
lime water, with the other end down, will
keep from 80 to 40 years, if they are not
disturbed Fresh beef stake IL good for
hens; serpose or 5 lbs. day would
be awl "A hen would need, at fust along.
| shall be happee tew advise with you, at
any time, on the hen ques ion-and take
pay for my advice in eggs.-Josh Billins'
A DUTCHwoMAN's IDEAL OF A MAN.
"A man is Won creature yot wears a
coat and SEES de ubttons off; vot opens
de doors, but never more shuts dem
vot 6inS his ,nOuSt 9chps in de cOup
and kisses me NIT de same. He is Won
goose vot buys de lozengers to treat de
girls He is Won animal-von brute vot
eats tobacco and bread the same mouth
He is Won monkey vot jumps over de
rail fences, and do not creep troo dem
like me. A man is Won angel vot
prings de vasser, and puchers de pig
and writes de sermons-vOn stumbling
plock vot | can beat ven | get angry
and spare de childer. He is Won water
proof vot de rain gets not troo but he
carries my umprilla. He is Won don
key that knows not how to sew, put
wears my thimble on his little finger
and treads needle troo de pool and ties
in de tread. He is Won dog that polls de
potatoes in de tea-kettle ven l go from
home, vot shuts up de cat in de milk
closet, and puts out de milk in de wood
shed dat she may not get it. He Is
Won great pocket book vot holds de
money he gives me some ven ! say
please, or ven | cry. He is Won thing
vot does not plush nor scream He is
Won man