Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1866-03-23
ALL SORTS OF ITEMS.

his dye is cast.
Ladies' in ball room often look as
if they needed military order-dress.
Did the man who laid in his coal
before the winter set in, have a comfort
able bed
"A child was run over by wagon
three years old with pantalets on which
never spoke afterwards.
North Carolina is able to boast Of
two original Union men-Chang and
Eng, the Siamese twins.
One of the saddest descriptions one
can give of household is, that the
master of it generally goes out of an
evening""
"A lady, playfully condemning the
wearing of whiskers and moustaches,
declared, SIT is one of the fashions |
invariably set my face against"
The meanest reason for getting
married that we have ever heard was
from man who said he wanted some
one to part his back hair for him.
I'm the report of certain School
Committee the following statement oc
ours: I" We had school house large
enough to accommodate four hundred
children four stories high"
"A smart young lawyers clerk,
hearing It stated by the lecturer that
"m man is merely machine remarked,
!" then I suppose an attorney may be
said to be suing machine"
Among the curiosities lately placed
In museum is musquito's bladder,
containing the souls of twenty-four
Government contractors and the fortunes
of twelve editors. 1t is nearly half full.
"A young lady out West who lately
collided with an bound sidewalk,
remarked, as she assumed perpendic-
ular position, g I'll have man to hang
on to before another winter"
A woman said in police court the
other day that before marriage her hus.
band pretended to be much struck with
her, but now she was every day struck
by him.
An exchange, describing celebra
ton, says: 'The procession was very
fine and nearly two miles in length al
was also the prayer of DR.. Perry thu
Chaplain
-.sCan you inform me-" said {
student to bookseller, /" whether / car
find anywhere biography of Pollock 2
Yes" said the bookseller, 81 dare say
you'll find it in the course oftiule.
"A good woman whose husband was
Ill, on being asked by the physician i
she had any sugar of lead in the house
replied, no, but there was plenty o.
sugar and pig of lead, and the doctor
could make some for himself.
Rev. Mr.. Stebbing having beer
Kissed at public meeting in San Fran
cisco, turned upon his assailant with
81 hear a hiss; did ever word Of
truth fall into the vortex of hell without
sending upa hiss ?"
-Thackeray tells of an Irish woman
begging aims from him, who when she
saw him put his hand in his pocket
cried out, May the blessing of Goo
follow you all your life." but, when he
only pulled out his snuff box, immedi
ately added, fand never overtake We"
"A lawyer once pleaded with great
ability the cause Of his client. When he
had done, his antagonist with superci.
lious sneer said he did not understand
word toe other said, who merely
replied. believe it, for was speaking
law"
The turkey burst its confinement
while roasting, and the stufing escaped
to the terror of the damsel left to watch
1t, who ran to call her mistress. MAN, =
she screamed, !" come down and see the
turkey It's brownin' nicely, but some oil
the consalements is Dustin out!
"A Down East editor wants to know
why editors are not blessed with dona-
ton visits as clergymep are, for editors,
1t is we'll known, are proverbial for their
kindness of heart, work of benevolence,
and excessively tender disposition to any
body and everybody who has an awfully
dull axe to grind.
1t is related of eengressman, who
made a'speecfi in the House few days
ago, that he was so mad on finding it cut
down to about dozen lines in the tele-
graphic dispatches, that he wrote to the
editor of New York paper, enclosing a
copy of his speech in the Globe, and
curing whether he would not do him the
justice and his readers the favor of pub.
fishing his argument" entire. In
reply, he received note from the adver
Using clerk, informing him that his
speech would make so many squares
which, at SO much square, would come
to SO much, actually one thousand FIVE
hundred dollars. The NJ. C. thinks the
editor is wretch, and the press Of the
country awfully demoralize5.
DEFINITIONS NOT IN WEBsTER.-Buss.
to kiss; rebuss, to kiss again: pluribus,
to kiss without regard to sex: sillybus
to kiss the hand instead of the Inns
blunderbuss, to kiss the wrong nerson
omnibuss, to kiss all the persons in the
room; erebus, to kiss in the dark
Evidently the country girl who wen
down to the city recently had thes,