Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1865-05-05
Nisefllameous.
Babies.

male, and are usually put up in package,
of one, though sometimes two, in which
case they are called twins, when nearly
of the same age. They are not confined
to any particular locality, but are found
plentifully distributed over all parts ol
the inhabited countries. Their ages arc
various and have wide range. We have
known them as young as It's easy to cal.
culate time on a watch dial, and then
again We have seen them where they had
acquired the healthy age of twenty. five
with fair prospect Of advancing still
farther to babyhood. Their weight dc.
pends great deal on their hcft, but as
they have twenty-one years to grow in
before it costs them anything. it don't
matter so much how big they happen to
be when they commence.
Probably babies have more pet names
than any other known article of their
size. In the tender years OF their life.
say the first two. they are lovingly ad.
dressed by such endearing names as Old
Beautiful, Sweetness, Honeycomb, Him
Darling Papa's Hope, Old Blessed, Ma
mas Joy, Mole 'Andsome, supposed to
be contraction of Old Handsome. and
hundreds Of other appcllations which we
never could translate.
For several years, until they get old
enough to play out OF doors and soil their
faces, their lives are one long continuous
game u Copenhagen, everybody laboring
under the delusion that all babies are
good for is to kiss, consequently to see one
is to kiss it. We cannot reeollect Of ever
finding ourselves in the presence Of ba.
by, but what the fond mother would say
to it, "now be good little deary, and
give the gentleman a nice sweet kiss. -
Of course, we accept it, though kissing
amt our forte. We are naturally mod.
est and don't care to be seen kissing any.
body. We don't banker after it as some
Of our friends do. We arc willing to
kiss pretty girl occasionally for her
mothers sake, or even for her own, rather
than have any trouble, yet we should
much prefer to have it remain on interest
to having it paid when it became due
We never should present our JM and de.
mand payment-not even if we continued
perfectly sane. We understand that there
are quite number of persons who differ
from us in regard to kissing, it so, lie,
them diff, we cannot stop to argue the
point, as our subject treats of babies.
The monotony Of babies livesis varied
by such little incidents as an attack oi
the measles, mumps or Group, and We
would not neglect to speak of cutting
teeth a baby that has got safely thro
with all these iniantlle troubles, is con-
sidered worth me seventy.fvc dollars
more than one who has them in prospect
The diseases are, however, easily treated
as in case Of the measles all that is
necessary is to have them "break .out"
well, and see to it that they don't "strikc
in." With the mumps, just let them
"mump" round day or two, and they
will come out all right. With the Group
it is necessary to "strike ile," generally
goose ie," and if applied in season,
twill soon lubricate the throat without
much trouble. Cutting teeth runs much
longer than either Of the other diseases,
yet by a timely Investment in a rubber
ring and rattle, you generally get rid of a
doctors bill. When we were young, we
cut our teeth on a silver dollar, but as
dollars are now made Of paper, they
won't stand the wear and tear of a whole
set of teeth md It's cheaper in the end to
invest in the rubber ring.
Learning to walk and talk are two
achievements about which too much can.
not be said. The walking though is mere
nothing compared tie talking, yet it is
more dangerous, and accidents oltener oc-
cur; still they usually acquire the art
with the necessary breaking Of some
crockery or furniture, which they fran.
tically clutch at, in order to save a fall
During the season of their practicing,
nothing can drop in the house, or the
least noise be made but what mother will
drop whatever she has in hand, and cry
out There goes Willie, what has be
done now" and rush to the scene of ac-
tion to find perhaps fower.pot on the
floor, and Willie engaged in scattering its
about the room. After clearing
up the debris, mother returns to her work
thanking her stars that it was orly a
choice vcrbena that was ruined, and not
Wilie's neck.
Their conversation, in the beginning. is
a little difficult to understand. They abb
brcvatc great deal, and throw aside all
pronouns as perfectly useless. Listening
to their talk is like attending an Italian
opera-one hears the noise but cannot
understand what it means The first
papa" or mamma" distinctly spoken, is
worth five dollars to either Of the de-
lighted parents Babies must not only
talk themselves, but must be talked to,
and the amount of baby.tak used in a
common.sizcd family is prodigous. -
Baby's appearance opens new field to
all. The old hands who have seen babies
before. converse in the language quite
duently, but It's ludicrous to hear be-
ginner undertake to master this difficult
tongue. Talking baby-talk is an art
winch few ever acquire to perfection, tho
by constant practice the most stupid can
partially acquire it, yet it takes two or
tEree generations of babies to make a
perfect linguist.
The effect baby produces on family
no matter how sober said family may be,
is wonderful to behold. 1t completely
turns the heads of all. If any particu-
lar one behaves more insane, or is carried
away more than the rest, we think grand
ma will bear off the palm. althouph ma,