Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1865-08-05
FOILING A RIVAL.

1.-The crittor loves me know she loves
lie = said Jon ahan Doubikine, as be sat
upon the corn6eld fence, meditating on
the course of his true love, that was run.
ming just as Shakt peare always said it did
rather roughly. IF Sukey Peabody
has taken shine on that gawky, long
'hanked, stamerin' shy critter Gu,set, just
cause he is city ivllur, she ain t The gal
took her for--that's sartain. No its
the old folks-darn their ugly pictures
Old Miss Peabody was alters dreadful
bitalutin' crltter, full Of big notions, aud
the old mans a regular soflhead, driven
about by hi wife jest as our old onc.eyed
rooster is drove about By our eautahker-
ou| fve-toed DIrkin hen. But if | don't
spile his fun my name Pint Jonathan -
| IN poin down to the city by the railroad
next week, nd when come back--w axe
snakes that's : all
The above sollloquy may serve to give
the reader some slight idea of the lay OF
the land in the pleasant rustic village
where the speaker resided.
Mr.. Jonathan DoubiRins was ycung
farmer, we'll to do 10 the world, and look
my out for wife, and had been paying
his addresses to Miss Susan Peabody, of
that TX, with fair prospect Of success,
when a city acquaintance ofthe Psabodys,
one Mr. Cornelius Gusset, who keEt re-
tail dry goods shop i'll Hanover street,
Bo'tou, had suddenly made his appearance
IN the field, and had commenced the cut
ting out game. D,zzled with the pros
pect of becoming a gcn,leman's wife, and
ptsered with the opportunities OF her as
piring mama, the village beauty had be-
gun to waver, when her old lover deter
mined on a last and bold strike to foil his
rival He went to the city and returned.
| OF his business there be said nothing, not
! even to pumping maiden aunt who kept
| house for him. He went not near the
| Peahody's but be lahored 10 bis G; rutield
patiently awaiting the result of hi, mack
nations.
The next cay, Mr. Gdsset was with the
old FOLKS and their daughter in the bes,
room OF the Peabody mansion, chatting as
pleasantly as may be when the door open
ed and 10 rushed very dirty and furiou
Irish woman.
'Isit there ye are, Mister Cornelius !!
she screamed, addressing the astoni,hcd
Gusset. Come out of III at before fetch
ye, ye spalpeeu! Is that what ye prom
sed me before the praste, ye haythen ma
CUR! Runniu away from me and The
children, for>akin' yer lawful welded wifi
and runnin' after the Yankee gals, ye in
fidel =
wv oman, there must be some mistake
here stammcred Gusse,, taken all abacl
by this chargel
Devil bit of mistake ye sarpan'. [
wirra! wrra was it for the like Of ye
sacked little Diuuis MoCary, who love-
the ground | throd 90, and all bekaso =
promised to make lady Of me- ye dirt
thief of the worruld Will ye come alon
,, to the railroad station, where left lttl
Patrick, because he was too sick wild tn
- small pox to come any iurder, or will y
e wait till | drag yo ?
:, 'Go--go-alODg,' gasped Gusso! go
1 and I'll follow you
!, He thought it best to tomporize.
Il give yo tin miuits,' virago. 'lf )
aiut these, its my cuzziu, Mr., Thadd
Mulgruddery will be after ye, ye thief
I'd And away went this 'unbidden guest.
is Mr.. Gusset was yet engaged in stan
g. mering out a denial Of all knowledge
the virago, when the parlor door cpene
h. again, aud the little ey ed, Ratchet faced "
ir ir, man, in dashy silk gown, and CT
o"SI with many ribbons perchsd on the top
re bor head, invaded tho sanctity OF the ia
lor,