The weekly union record., 1865-06-03
Artemus Wards Brother

The following quaint letter from a gentle
man who processes to be the brother of the cele
bra,ed Artemus Ward, says an Eastern ex
change, reached Us the other day, By regular
mail, and we give it because it embraces Sc
much of the special kind of humor for which
Artemus is so renowned, The whole family
seems to be laboring uuder very SPELL
which is 4 disorder that in their case, however,
seems to operate as disease does upon certain
oysters, in producing a pearl where We might
only expect puiridily:
SHECAGo. March II, 1865.
To thee Edytur of the Sundy Times y. Y:
4 Years ago, while in Indianapolis. injyana, |
rote to Mr.. Prentis, of the Looesville Jurnil,
regarding thee whereabouts of my brother,
Aytymus Ward, Of hoom have net heard
sSt he was bo
And We romed tie fields together,
happe as a Mackeral in X ashmeer Sox. There
was four off Us berolhers all buls. Thee fol-
leriug is a pedagog of our family. Oar pa
rents. off which there was ,, consisted Of our
father and mother, namely:
Hammer aud Erysipelas Ward The latter,
my father. was given heavily TO plugg toback
er, off which be chawed inceSsanty though
Billed Baken done rair was bis best hold. He
was man that could not 90 long between
drinks the kamil did not predominant in him,
and o. Hover took him at the age of sicksty.
and after dais cicEuess. The following is
applicable to his case
Okum Okum with mes Spere.
After the old mans de,h, our mother was
left with the bos aforesaid, 1rl'--, namely,
i. e.:
Erysipelas luamed after father.
Artymus (the Long Lost.
Rodney and myself.
Olouzo (named after olonzo of pizzaronean
celebrty)
My eldest brother Ery, went into the Wood
bizzennes, while Rodney went out TO OriggOue
territory and Mbarked in the Fur trade. Fry
did poorly at the WOOL and busted, but Rod
ney Is still in the Fur coming money.
Artymus, at the tender age Of eleven, was
suddenly mist from hoam. In this koneXshin
| would remark an old stockin belongin to
mother, containing fore dollars in oliver aud
ffty-too cents in koppers disappeared about
the same time. There was party OF akraw-
bats, or double somerset proklivitys, in our
naburhood few days preevls. and by many it
was supposed Arty had been invigged
g To leve his ga and happa hoam
Sands eye. sands teeth brushes,
Sands pale ale.
The wo rid is all 4 stage.
The rest is lemon and vauilla-Jake spear.
At all evinks have never heern of him but
once, I. e., when ! wrote to Mr.. PrentIs, who
did not ancer Gly letter. be being engaged in
transatin a French letter sent to him by Miss
Soosan Monday, a noted gorriler of the femail
gender Of her more hereafter; but Karen
Gus on cur mutton, as the French have j.. |
heard that mi ber0ther, a. Ward. had bekum
ri.ch. be having been to Salt Lick City,
among the Mormen and women the was allus
given to the latter even from a child, ard
that moreover and above, he had got sho of
wax fggers and nevertheless was perfectly de-
caved with money; in which event l would re-
mind him
still liye."-Webb.
And as his absents caused me many teers Il
carried aul the water and chopt aul the wood
for two yeres after bis Ieving u.s. and as | am
his only SURFING berOther in poor suckemstan-
ces (Ery being rich and Rodney when last
hern from was in big contract for furnishing
phne toothed kombs for the Confederat army
with his he'd quarters at Richmund), therefore
| do think Arty might come and see me. He
is ever welkome to mi poor but happa hoam.
Owe, owe brother If this shood meat your i,
think kindly of one who loves not wisely but
too well but owe, owe, deer Artymus do not
try TO shake Ue. OLoNzo WARD.
Deer beroiher, don't don't. go back onto
me. y. W
why do l wepe 4 thee" 0. W.
VALuABLE TABLE.-The following table will