East Saginaw courier. (East Saginaw, Mich.) 1859-18??, 1865-04-19
REBEL PHILOSOPHY ExEMpLIrIsO.
Letter from Orpheus G. Kerr---How
the South Feels Under It's Re-
verses----All Disasters but Bless
ings in Disguise.

in which he capitally takes off the
very satisfactory manner in which
Rebellion receives its continued and
repeated disasters. Capt. Bob Shorty
personates the Federal Government
while Capt. Munchausen figures as
the Confederacy:
Right behind me came a remarka-
pio ueing, a,srrvu III fragments oi grey
cloth and a prodigious thicket OF
whiskers, through the latter part OF
which his eyes glowed yellowly like
the bottles in an apothecary's shop
down the street. AS he approached
nearer he hastily put on pair OF
partially dissected white cotton gloves,
and casually re-arranged the strip OF
carpet binding which served him as a
full dress 'cravat.
"Yeurs, truly" said Capt. Bob
Shorty.
"Vandal Kissed Capt. Munchau-
sen, removing from his brow an I'M
exampled conglomeration of rags in
the last stages of cap, and handing
it TO faithful contraband who attend
ed him.
"Why, them" said Capt Bob
Shorty, doffing his own cap, and tuck
ing up his sleeves /" in the name of
the United States of America, i pro-
pose to move upon your works imme-
diately."
| And now, my boy, / do particularly
lament my lack of those unspeakable
intellectual gifts which enable the
more refined reporters Of our excel
lent and moral daily journals to des-
cribe the fistic achievements Of the
noted Arkansas Mule and celebrated
Jersey Bantam in a manner that de-
lights every well,conducted breakfast
table in the land, and furnishes ex-
quisite reading for private families.
Forward hoped Capt. Bob Shorty,
as though on springs, his elbows neat
ly squared, his fists held up like a
couple of apples on stick, and his
head poised as though it had Just
started to look round corner. With
fists to match and eyes shining like
the bottoms Of glass bottles, the wary
Munchausen scufiles cautiously back
from him in half circle. Now they
make skips toward each other; and
now they skip back. Anon an arm
is raised and is parted and then
they balance TO partners; and then
they hop back.
/ was gazing at all this, my boy, in
speechless admiration, when suddenly
l saw the dexter hand of Capt. Bob.
Shorty, pierce the enemy's lines, and
explode with tremendous force on
Munchausen's nose. For a moment
there was a sound as Of Confederate
blasphemy; but in moment the
chivalric Munchausen was himself
again. os.r
"Ah p said Capt. Bob. Shorty,
agreeably, "did you see the Star
Spangled Banner that timer"
'"Sir," said Munchausen, with tears
in his eyes, Ct am thankful that my
nose is broken. 1t is blessing ; for
/ had nothing to smell with it, and
only wasted my strength in its special
defense"
Here Captain Bob. Shorty looked
iovially at me, my boy, and says he :
"By all that's Federall amt he
jolly?"
"Come on to thy ruin?" roared the
Munchausen from behind his rapidly
increasing nose and again the battle
ragged.
Now did Capt. Bob Shorty sidle to
the left, with q view to thanking; but
two columns Of the enemy met him
there. Next the agile Munchausen
attempts, by quick turn, to take
him in the rear of his position, but
finds strong body Of FIVE divisions
hauled upon his headquarters with an
impetuosity that knocks out half his
teeth.
cart satisfied, Horatio?" said Capt
Bob. Shorty, with more or less Bow
cry theatre in his manner.
An awful smile appeared upon what
were left of the features of Capt
Munchausen. 1t was so full of scorn
you know.
"Sir," said he, with much chivalry
Of bearing and some difficulty of ut
terance, "my jaw may be broken, bu'
/ thank fate for it. It's a long time
since ! had anything to eat with my
mouth, and to defend it at all was
useless"
4 "Hal ha! hap roared Capt. Bob
Shorty. "I really never did see any
thing so jolly"
/ "Madmanw yelled Munchausen
"your destruction is decided"
4 Then were all the skips and hop
repeated, my boy; with such orna
mental bits of occasional fine art a
the refined reporters of our excellen
moral daily journals love to dwell
fondly upon Were / but such a re
porter, l would describe the scene il
a way to mako you take it home t
your children But let me not vast
time in lamentation for just then,
something heavily fell upon the RICH
eye of Capt. Munchausen, and effect
uaIly closed it for week,
Il "Ahw said Capt. Bob. Shorty
pleasantly, "did you count tho stan
, npon our flag that time, my gray
, backY"
"Sir," retorted Munchausen, stag
/ gering about, and wildly pulling hand
f fulls Of imperceptible hair out of il
, visible heads IN the air, /" consids
: the loss Of that eye a blessing in di'
: guise for can now concentrate III
] whole strength on the other"
/ "Well now, really" said Captai
: Bob Shorty" really, you know,
!. never see anything half 50 jolly"
S. determination is now your doom
{ howled the Confederacy, reeling q
-IlfL. ....o., tlo G,.at q