Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1865-03-18
FACITIE.

Light Infantry Kouement. -Agitating
a cradle with baby in it.
We would like to know whether or no
it is libel 70 call bakers apprentice q
kneady loaferf
A man who had been married twice to
ladies' both named Catherine, advised bis
friends against taking dupli Hates.
Old Dog Tray-The old dog Trays
ever faithful, they say: But dog that is
faithful can never be tray.
Some say the quickest way to destroy
weeds is to marry widow. 1t is, no
doubt, On agreeable species Of husbandry.
The latest way to pop the question is to
ask fair lady if you can have the plea.
sure of seeing her to the minister's.
A student in want Of money sold his
books and wrote home, "Father, rejoice,
for l now derive my support from litera-
ture.'
ARENAS Ward, while in Salt Lake, was
offered saint ship and twenty two wives
if be would bring his wax 6ggers" aud
| settle down. lie declined.
Everybody sits in judgment on a dirty
sin; but clean it, dress it, polish it, and
there are ten thousand people who think
it not so sinful after ALL
A lady who had read Of the extensive
manufacture Of odometers, to tell how far
carriage had been run, said she wished
some Connecticut genius would invent an
instrument to tell how far husbands had
been in the evening when they ''just step
dowh' to the post Office
Hop to Stuff Goose. Cut a piece of
hair from Skye terrier, and send it in a
letter to coxcom5, telling him its lock
of young lady's hair who has fallen in
love with him.
4 "Hoss Carr Neutrality-suspicious.
Ward is looking at things in Boston. He
had an adventure one day, which resulted
as follows: l returned in the Hoss Cars
part Of the way. A pooty girl in specta
cles sot near me, aud was teliin young
man how much he reminded her of a
young man she used to know in Waltham.
Poorly soon the young man got out, and
smilin' in seductive manner, said to
the girl in speotao!os-"Don't l remind
you of somebody you used to know ~
"Yes," she said, "you remind me of one
man, but he was sent to the penintentiary
for stealth barrel of mack erel-he died
there, so l concluded you amt him.
l didn't pursoo the conversation.
THE character of the young men Of q
community" says a modern writer, ode.
pend much on that of the roung women.
II the latter are cultivated, intelligent,
accomplished, the young men will feel the
requirement that they themselves should
be upright, gentemanly, and refined but
if their fe males are frivolous and silly, the
young men will be found to be dissipated
and worthless. But remember, always,
that sister is the best guardian of broth.
er's integrity. She is the surest inculca-
tor of faith in woman's purity. As
daughter she is the true light Of the home
certain green customer, who was a
stranger to mirrors, and who stepped into
the cabin of one of our fine Memphis
packets, stopped in front of large pier
glass, which he took for door, saying -
II say, mister when does this ere boat
start?' Getting no reply from the dumb.
reflector befofe him, he again repeated -
II say, mister, when does this ere boa:
start?" Incensed at the still silent figure
he broke GU Go to thunder, you darn.
ed sassafras colored, shock headed, bull
calf; you don't know'd much no.how.'
PASSION For DlsrLAY.-The world is |
crazy for show. There is not one person
in a thousand who dares fall back on
nothing but his real, simple self for power
to get through the world and extract On.
joyment as he goes along. There is too
much living in the eyes Of other people
There is no end to the eping, the mimicry,
the false airs, ard the superficial arts. 1t
requires rare courage, We admit, to ones |
enlightened convictions in these times.
uusess you consent to join in the general
chent. you are jostled cut Of reach, there
ia no room for you among the great mob
Of pretenders. If man dares 10 live
within his means, and is resolute in bis
purpose not to appear, more than he real
y is let him be applauded. There is some
thing fresh and rare in such examples. :
The Old Man Circle. --Mr. Dodge OF the
firm of A. Fl. Gardiner l. Co, Of this city,
has in his possession portrait Of the ven
cradle Joseph Crele, Of Caledonia, of