The Cleveland leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1865-1865, 1865-08-05

4ASe CAAI ~ il ElAlA LhBBA
which Is not at all good; and Mrs. Gre
grum said she understood We found on
! own plate-she's only got tWo-pronge,
steel forks and there's a dog next doc
but one, they tell me, that hoWls all night
and the windows in our room rattle s
Edreaotully that we shsn't get much sleep
I'm afraid and there's no lock to the door
and the pillows are like dummies, they'rt
SO hard. And so you must put up with 81
egg and 8 slice of bacon for your tea"
The volubifity OF my wife, eliminating
In 8 decided non seqlitar, was more than j
could bear. l seized q chair in my agIta.
ton, and the back rails came off in nv
hand. This Gained me. I propped Il
against the wall with the determination Of
declaring 1 hadn't done it, and smiled
once more. I.l.l
"Mrs. Cooler, 1 obser 7ed, Il never I'D
dress my wife thus except under very pecu-
liar circumstances, y" Mrs. Cooler, /
have taken these apartments for 3 month,
and We must try and make the best Of
them. Fortified by the cheering society
of the Interesting Stranger, no doubt YOU
will be able to bear up"
Mrs. COedler colored, and would have
replied, but l waved her aside. and went
out into the street TO gee the lionsI
The lions ! l was not long in seeing
them all. There were the six bathing7
machines, the principal" hotel, the post
office, the library, and-not hing else. The
library was an imposing ediiee; that is to
say, it was 8 dead take-iD. There were no
new books whatever, and 1 refused to be
comforted by the Adventures ofa Guines;"
neither could l be brought to properly sp-
preciste the charms OF Pamela :" so l
went home again. 1 walked up stairs, and
entering the apartment, fOund-not the IN
teresting stranger, but a policeman-s
regular rural peeler. He eyed me with
professional distrust and q calm smile. 1
swelled with indignation, and tried to awe
him, but he was not to be Rwed- ~.
"Good morning." said the policeman,
Familiarity. II presume"
"You do, sir" 1 replied sharply, in my
imPerious manner "you presume very
considerably IN entering a Rentlemsn's
apartments in this way, sir. Let me tell
you an Englishmsn's first floor is his castle,
sir. What do you want 2"
"You y replied the constable in a deep
tone.
l was becoming accustomed to this sort
OF tnlng emlled.
"Your name is Dumpton ?" said the fel-
low.
sAn right" 1 replied, shave it 30, if YOU
like ; you must know best" 1 was tickled
by the atrocity of the whole thing.
What's the charger Burglary 2 Gar
Murder? What is it ~
"YA came from town by the half after
ten train ~
n did,
tGoodI A telegram informs me I'm TO
arrest q party of your description at least,
you're near enough the description for me
10 arrest you. So, without more sdoo,
come on"
i My wife Is IN excellent m and st
her feelings get too many for her.
She heard the final speech of the police
mon, and was with difficulty dissusded
flying 1T him. Such was also the
case with Sarah Nsggles, who has highly
developed nails, and lin consequence of
hopes) nourishes an abnormal
hatred of " the fOrce." Between these two
desperate women the q policeman OF
hudville would, l Am afraid, have come to
he most unmitigsted grief. He saw his
peril, and produced a pair of handouts. 1
confess the sight unnamed me, and l sank
nto a chair. l produced my card /
pointed to the direction of my boxes 1
threatened to write TO the Times; 1 ex-
how ridiculous it would be in a
elon travelling about with q family; 1
and stormed alternately, but to no
'bjsct. The policeman had received his
nstructionsi had been directed to us by
he benevolent one-eyed fy-driver; had
his orders, and was dead to rem
on, blind to a bride, and generally stupid
md uns wervingly upright
Mrs. Grogrum coming in suddenly upon
he scene did not improve the tone of the
Meeting, as may be supposed. She had
ettled that we twas no good the instant
Mrs. Q. had made rude remarks about her
rying pan, "a article as q reel lady would
to worrit herself about And as
or that sylph in the black stockings Shoe.
an, she had long ago learnt to place the
confidence in the Mudville police
nan, who was the model OF manly beauty
n the eyes of the neighboring maid
We were at our wits end. My wife was
the nurse furious, the children frsc-
ious. Wrapped in his panoply of author
y and big-headedness, the policeman
lone was calm, ,a.l.I
To us lat this juncture) entered blithely I
he Interesting Stranger. A smile wss on
lis lip, a teal was not in his eye. 1 was
bout 10 appeal TO him to clear up the
when 1 observed a remarkable
hsnge come over his features. d At the
anne time a change as remarkable came
yer the countensnce of the aggressive
Unstable. He clspped his eye on the figure
+ the Interesting Stranger, and almost
instantly clapped his professional hand
utfs on the wrists of the same individual.
The Interesting Stranger answered to
he descrition in the telegram in every par
ocular, and to this day l cannot compre- =
END the reason for arresting me, for we
we're not in the least alike. The Is. was ]
all, l am-well, under the middle height
me L. s. was g~ood-looking, lat least Mrs.
declares so, spite of everything;
nd he was described by the police reporter
8 q "Person of fashionable sppearsnoe') c
nd l am, l admit, not striking TO look st,
hOugh digniied Tor a short person, The
d. s.. was not dressed like me either; so al e
it was q muddle at NJ udVille, and
might have kicked up 8 great row about
DID stop TO q any arguments, TO re-
Give the grovelling apologies Of Mrs. Gro
rum, the trembling b~eseechings of the OBJ I
use policeman, the solemn assurances of
and cleanliness from ShOozan, the
sympathy of the excited popu-
'ce-did l wait for all this ?
Did II
Did 1 fetch the one-eyed fly driver from
il fsvorite haunt, and bundle self AID
Lmily back to town that afternoon?
Didn't II
RAT