The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1865-08-21
Humorous selections.
(sAYtNds or JOSH DILLlNos.l

IN lAGNa We SNi8AAt AlAlalAANN9al '..
It IL highly important that when u
man makes mp his mind tGw bckum II
raskal, that he shOuld examine hiEself
clusly, aud see il he nint better kOn-
struCted fer u phoOl.
Inrgy in this way, II n man IL right,
he kant he too radilldl and ifhe izrong
he kant be too kOnsHrvutltT. ia.
II IL II very delikate job two forgiven
man without lowering him in hiS own
esthnashun--and yureS too.
Az n ginTnl thing, when a woman
war9s the britches, she hns a gud rite to
them.
lam poor, and am glad TINT ] am,
for / find thNt wealth makes more PcO-
pie mean thnn It doz generous.
WOmail's intloOeneo IL powerful-tsi-
peshila when she wants ennything.
No man luvs tew git beet, but ii IL
better tew git beet than tew bo rong.
Stickin up your nOzo don't prove
ennything, fora sope biler, wen he IL
ava from hiz hum, he smells every
thing.
AWl kind ov bOres are q nuisance, but
1t IL better tew be bored with atew inch
orger than gimblet.
luis beu ulut IOsS uOu Y huuN AlS
strength''-and ! don't really suppose
that skunk does Iluther. FH
'Ile shure yOu'refite, then go ahead" "
but In kasc NV doubt, 90 ahed emmy wa.
Sekts and kreeds.uv religion ar like
pocket kumpnsees, gud enutt toPint
out the direesshun, but the nearer the
polo W git the wus tina wuTk.
Men amt apt tew git kicked out NV
good society fer being ritch,
The rode TO ruin IL alwus kept In
good repair, md the travellers pay the
expense NV II.
II u man begins life hl being fust
lutenunt in his iAmile, he need never
tew look for prOmOshen.
The only profit there IL in keepin
more than one dOrg, IL wat yu kan
make on his board.
haven't got as much mummy ez sum
folks, but hev gotas much impudence
ez emmy ov them, and this Is the next
thing to munny.
1t aint often that mans reputashun
outlasts lIiZ mummy, EE
Don't 'tIistake afrOgNnse for wisdom;
menny huv' thought tina waZ wise,
when tina wuz onla windy. The man
who cant git ahead withdlt pullin 9TH
ers back, is n limited Gus. :
The following specimen Of low parti-
san wit we take from the New York
Express, although We cannot say that
it is original with that paper:
4 NEW JoURNAn.-Wo have been
shown u copy Of Il new paper, called the
''Black Republican, and Office Holders
Journal" Pluto Jumbo Is editor nnd
proprietor, and, it bears ns a motto,
God and the negro are our only hope"
-=H4NY. BeeCEe. The prosp peetns Is set
forth in the following notice:
"All dem dat scribes TO dis yere paper
will hab a portrait of de editor thrown
IN. White folks can take dis paper II
dey pays in advance.
Ticklar tention paid to whites adver-
tlsements, which am charged dnODle
price, aud hot corn for sale in de base
ment. e
Nossin to 60 in dis paper till 1t hah
been Inspected by do Loyal League"
Contemporaries OF the press are eau
toned In lnthefollowing language against
stealing the thlinlcr Of the '..Blnck Re
publican ~ T ti,J
"As dis paper nm de organ OBJ Wen
die Flip, darfore all de orations OBJ dat
gentleman will peRr In desc enllums,
and dem dat tGlkes EN- out and puts EN-
into dhr own paper will be prosecuted
cording to law" "
! An advertisement appears for a boy