The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1865-03-04

: A NEGLECTED SOURCE OF REVENUE
The Finance Committee have failed, SO far
as we have discovered, to insert any pro-
vision in the tax bill taxing that unprofita-
bic animal known to mankind as bache-
lor. The imposition OF such tax is con-
stitutional, and properly regulated would
become source Of considerable revenue.
Nor is It without precedent. After the civ.
il wars which transformed Rome from q
republic into an empire, the Roman youths
were so opposed to matrimony that Angus
tus not only levied q tax upon the state OF
singleness, but added penalties to the fail
ure to commit 1natrimony within . speci-
fed time. And since the Caesars the tax
has. from time to time, been laid and en-
forced. Statistics show an alarming pre-
ponderance Of females in the country. This
odds has reached such proportions In Mas.
and remedy. In other States the social
condition Is becoming equally portentops.
The war has taken OF SO many young and
unmarried men that the evil has grown
rapidly and enormously. A tax. . slit,
releAt1ess and comprehensive tax, would
serve the double purpose Of increasing the
revenue and magnifying the ONCE OF mag
istrate and minister. AZ t....
And why not tax bachelors? Let them
pass under the yoke, or nay tribute 70 Cse-
sar. When q stifI.necked and perverse fell
low creature passes that dangerous crisis.
when sitting up o nights with . pair Of
black eyes and blue spencer ordinarily
turns tho stomach against roast beef and
other solids for fortnight when 10 %.
capes that period when hand or halter
are considered the only alternatives; when
his moustaches begin TO look ont i8ercely
from under his nasal promontory, threat.
enlng - the eea-dogs OF . man.o1.war;
when his beard grows brusqns and shocky.
and . suspicion Of gray appears IN bic hair
track about his eyes, and the lines 81 drm-
iness and decision are drawn about his
mouth :ifs then he will obstinately and or.
Iurately intrench himself in the snug and
tight castle, Of Self-close the perfcullis
against the young cupids that sound their
fairy bugles without-draM down the
blinds over the windows 1t which whole
sunrise Of smiles glances and dances for
admission-stuff the .porches of his ears
with poppy leaves while thesyrens Of beau
" sing bewitchingly but in vain. and re-
GuDo to capitulate or surrender to charms
more Irresistible than Paris decided upon
if hewill, in short, remain = brown, dry,
ting with the money -changers, talking pol
tics in the club-room, theology in the study
and philosophy in the cabinet, while de-
ightful bevses of the fair are dying for an
hours gossip, or Q 'walk by moonlight
alone; if he will not avail himself OF the
opportunlty- 81 5st3,s4 Is
san .sWi.h nobody very near,
And mamma too blind to discover
The small whi.e hand in hts;'
If ne win loll back on the sofa and sleep.
while fiddles and feet unite in waltz and
schotsisch, and in all things behave with |
the GOODNESS Of q clam. equally inperviousi
70 the ineligible beauty OF form and feat
use. then may he be taxed in casket and in
store, in person and in property (real and
personal) and compelled to sustain and
support that condition out Of which he
stingiiy sponges his social comfort and ho-
ney, with less gratitude in his soul than the |
devout lay1nan who thanked God he had
heard the Gospel preached for twenty years !
ana it hadn't cost him cent. The tax i
would b immensely popular with the la |
dles, and should be mercilessly and rieor-
ously laid on, Tex 'om, -. !