The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1865-11-03
( NUMBER NJ INI As.
SPARE LINES.

Z i
Why cannot railway engine 'is DOWN.
Because It has tender behind.
An exchange says thas tho oyster Is . lamel-
libnnchiate molusc What pity.
"Let US cross over and rcst under the shade
of tho trces," wero tho last words Of Stone
wall jackson.
/ The name Of the heir 10 Tho throne Of Siam
ID Phra Bard Somdetch Phrs Panncndr Moha
Mongkut Phra Chom Klsu Chsu Tu Hua. 80
tits not positively ssased that "tho fat wo.
man" Is engaged to be married, but Il Is we'll
known that sho had fame at Banum's Mu-
scum. 40 '-.'A ~ ''I' ai''. t-f t'H.lifit
Grapple ever with opportunity. And, as
you do not know when opportunity will hap,
pen along, kesp your graphing irons always
ready. go srl, 'i r-iv nr. .' 'f rldi
The nrst lesson business man should learn,
is the yaluo Of printers ink. Lot him DO is-
norSnt Of that and all the knowledge he pos
sesses will bs Of little vsIuo to him. '.a1l
The best capital for young mechanic iSs'
capital young vile. It is, at least, asort OF
capital that Is generally producsive-apoIntal-
ways considered 10 making investments. .n'
An agricultural society offered . premium for
the best essay on irrigation. BY mistake II was
printed irritation. whoreupon An honest farmer
sent his wife.
A ADutchman, being advised to rub his limbs
we'll with brandy for the rheumatism, said ho
had heard OF the remedy, but added: dush
better as dat; drinks do brandy, and then
rubs my leg init do bottle ssi ,raEI -
AniIrish dragoon officer, on hearing that his
widowed mother had married since ho quilted
Ireland, exclaimed: "Murther nj hope
.hc will not have son older than me; IL shoi
docs Isliall lose the estate" ,a -im1il Ed
s.sYes, Mrs. Min. I" said visitor to her host
es,"dear little Emma has your features, but I
think rho has got her fathers hair" "Oh,
now see," said dear little Emma, at is bo-
causo have papa's hair that ho wears wig"
Two centuries ago not ono in hundred woro,
stockings. Fifty years ago not one boy ina
thousand was allowed to run at large at night.
Fifty years ago not one girl in thousand mado
q waiting maid Of her mother. Wonderful
improvement in thi, age!" tiao, asa.f,
II four cats with sixteen legs can catch FOUR
teen rats with forty.two legs, while woman
with two tongues Is saying Jack Robinson,
how many legs must eight rats have to get
away from the samo number Of cats 10 two
minutes, due allowance being made for tars and
tret? ...f .......-s. ...... ..ir ..fr .sr,t
When Cesar was advised by his friends to
be more cautious Of the security Of bis person,
and not walk among the people without arms,
or any one 70 defend him, ho always replied to
their admontions, ale that lives in fear Of
death every moment feclsi.s tortures. will
die but once" ........,
When an inidel was on bis death.bcd, his
confidence in bis in6delity became shaken, and
some Of bis friends advised him to hold on q
the last. Ills reply was, ~ have no objection
to holding on, but will you tell me ,chat am
10 hold on by?" Ah, there Is tho fatal want.
Tnadslisy gives nothing to bold on BY. 19li Jaa
Chow do you like the character Of St. Paul'"
asked parsou Of his landlady, ono day, during
q conversation about tho old saints and tho
apostles. "Ah! ho was good, clever old %
soul, know-lor he once sid, you know, that y
We must eat what Is sct before rs, and ask no
questions for conscience sake. Ialways thought
l should like him for o boardcr,' ''o -"
An editor and his wife were walking oot in
the bright moonlight ono evening. Like all
editors wives, she was Of an exceedingly poetic
nature, and said to her mate: "No.ics that .
moon !; how bright, calm and bcautiful!"l
"Couldn't think Of noticing IT," returned tho n'
editor, "for anything less than the usual rates d,
"a dollar and CITY cents for twelve lines" d
The wedding ring is put on the fourth finger
Of the woman's left hand, because In the orig.
inal formula Of marriage II was placed first on
the top Of the thumb, with the words, "In tho
name Of the Father; then on tho next finger
with the words, "and Of the Son.; then on tho
middle finger, with, "and Of the Holy Ghost;
and finally on tho fourth with the "Amcn."
The man who would systematically and viii
fully Get about cheating printer, would coa-
NIT . highway robbery upon crying baby, and
rob Il of its gingcrbread-rob q church OF
counterfeit pcnnics-pawn his grandmothers
specs for drink Of whiskcy-steal acorn' from
a blind SOW, and take tho clothes of SCARE
crow to make respectable appearance In 30.
cicty. ~ gf' 80 .7s To-
Z "My dear bcarcrs," " said "a preacher, discours-
ing on the subject Of death, "thcro's nothing
destroys % many lives as death. Some people
are killed BY accident, and somo In battle
sou,e arc lost at sea, and somo arc devourcd by
wild boasts; but, nay hearers, u Is . solemn
truth, that nothing kills 90 many as death.
Ay, death has been at work ever since sin On.
tered the world, and has destroyed millions on,
millions Of tho human family" -- r..
Ny nephew Joe ID bustcr, aged ten. Tho
other Sunday his mother was making him go
over his Sabbath school lesson before school.
tho subject being Moses in the burning bush. o
In reply 10 the question, "What did Moses ny
when be saw Ia" Joe sn'wercd, 81 don't
know" "It's worry simple, "s'id bic mother, q
wha. would yos bave said ifyou had '''n i'F'
Ms!'' sEclainsd the younsssor, h's oyes grow q
Ing big with excitement--"me. why "a have