The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1865-03-25
4 RIET Y.

We promise according to our hopes; we perform
according to fears
Married life too often begins with rosewood and
mahogany and ends with pine.
We have never seen an arch angel, but we have
seen many arch
When bet hats and coats, it Is generally at
the hatters aud tailor's expense.
Not half so beautiful is the penetrating eye
as that which lets everything penetrate it.
When \ landlord shows you any excessive civity
be sure he expects to put it down in the bill.
Free feasts, balls and barbecues often turn out
to be the most expensive ones n man ever attends.
Eve plucked but one apple from the of know
ledge. Many daughter Of hers fatter herself that
she has stripped the whole tree
Why is a man. chin the most unlucky part of his
body Because it is constantly getting into scrapes
RIGHT KIND OF ISvAsIoS-One country cannot
invade another more efectua!ly than by army of
ideas.
y temperance lecturer said Parents, you have
children, or if you have not, your daughters may
have
gentleman, who practices what he breaches,
says that the best way IS to owe small bills, pay
you go, DO without things till you have the money
10 pay for themi to which we say, Amen.
The following beautiful couundrum is attributed
70 Mr. Canning OF England
There IS a werd of plural number,
Bot II yoa chancs % add an 5
plural was, plural o more,
And sweet, what hitter before
Gus the comforts. viewed necessities by the great
body Of the people, and the further those comforts
are removed from gross sensuality, the higher the
moral condition Of that people, IS principle in pol
itics without exception The warm house, the
neat furniture, the comfortable meal. the decent
clothing, the wellweedei and flower decorated gar
den, the favorite singing bird and spaniel, and the
small but WellChOsen collection Of books. enjoy
meut5 beyond the means Of the idle, and not the
choice of the tavern hunter.
EFFECT5 Og IMAGINATiOS.-Wheu the waters of
Glastonbury were at the height Of their reputation
ia l10l, the following story told by gentleman
Of character An oil woman Of the wOrkhOuse
YeOvil, who had long been cripple and made use OF
cTutches. strongly inclined 10 drink Of the G!as
tonbury water, which she was assured would
her Iameness- The master Of the workhouse pro-
cured her several bottles Of water, which had such
an effect that she soon laid aside one crutch, and,
not long after the other. This extolIed
most miraculous cure; but the man protested to his
friends that he had imposed upon her and fetched
water from ordinary spring. | need not inform
your readers that the force of imagination had spent
itself. and she relapsed into her former nfrmity.-
UiiSOH.
'' ''DONEsTICK RECEIPTS FULL, 81 JOSH BILLINGS"
--Tew sarve up cowcumbers-pick EN- when the dew
is EN-, pair em neetly, slice EN- thin, add sault
and let stand for 60 minnits, pepper freely,
ad good sharp vinegar and then-raze up the winder
karefulle and throw em out
Tew maik wOtermelons the old fashund wa, steel
en- bye muneie, and EN- in the lot.
Iobsters want tew be billed whole till they be ded
pore Ice GREEN over en- send for the dOcktor,
before going to bed and tell yure trends da
that you have ben threatened with atackt ar the
rebels.
Tew remove goose pimpes-skin goose.
Tew kure hams-bath EN- in Hostet,r's Bitters.
Tew bring up a child in the way he should 60
travel that way yerselt
Influence OF LOVE ToKENs.-There is, after all,
something in those trhes which friends 6estow upon
each other which Is unfailing indication of the
place the giver holds in the affections / would be
!eve that who DTessrrei lock Of hair. q sim
trim Of baSr al
though no show were made Of it; while all the pro-
testatons in the world would not win me if knew
they value on such things. Trfes they may
be; but II Is by such that character aud disposition
are Oftenest revealed Washington LrUtng.
MARRIAGE SPECULATIoS.-A applied to DR..
jackson, the celebrated chemist Of Boston, with a
box of specimens - Can you tell me what this is,
sir2 Certainly can, SIR; that IS iron pyrltes
" What, sir - in voice of thunder - Iron
pyTites'' ' Iron pyrites and wha; is that
That's what it is.'' said the chemist, putting lot
the shovel the hot Goals, where 1t disappeared
q Dross.'' '' And what is iron pyrites worth -
Nothing Nothing Why, there's a woman
who q hill full Of that in our town, and I've
married her"
THE STREETS OF NEw YoRK-Very few persons
have any conception Of the magnitude Of the work
20 be performed IN cleaning the streets OF large
city Ike New York. The Herald, in an article on
the subject remarks There are two hundred and
sxtyeght miles Of paved in the city ayerag
ing thiryth feet in width This gives an area Of
thousand one hundred and thirty-n nine acres TO
De cleaned Inc CITY inspector has the whole
swept every fortnight; about one quarter is
swept three times; three hundred and forty acres
cleaned six times; and seyeEty.fve acres twelve
times IN the space of time This is equivalent
20 cleaning three thOnsand Eve hundred and fifty
three acres once in weeks. In addition to this
york the ash every mile Of the streets.
on each side every day, Sundays excepted Ibis is
equivalent to trayersing five hundred and thirtysiI
miles day. and conveys idea Of the extent Of
this magnificent metropolis. The expense for street
cleaning last year was S39a. .233-ScieHtifc finer.