The Nashville daily union. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1862-1866, 1865-09-06
Artemus Ward on the Celebration at
BaldInsVille, In Honor OF the At
lantic Cable.
From the New York Saturday Press.l
BALDINsyHLE, lEJIANNY,
Cav, the Oncf Is n 6S

BALDINsyILLE, lNJIANNY,
Sep the onct, Is Il 30
was summund home from Cinsin
natty quite sudden by a letter from
the supervisors of Baldinsville, sayin
as how gratethings was on the Tap
pis in that air town in retfrunse
to selebratin the compleshun OF
the Sub-Mershine Telegraph q akin
me to be presunt Lockin up nj
kangaroo and wax wurks in q seizure
stile, 1 took my departer for Baldins
ville-'my own, my nativ lar" which
got intew at early handle litin on the
follerin night, Il Just as the sellerbra.
shun and illuminashun were com
mensin.
Baldinsville was trooly in blaze OF
glory. Mere can | forget the sublime
spectical that met my case, as | allied
from the stage with my umbreller and
verlise. The Tavern was lit up with
taller kandels all over, and a CRATE bon
fire was burnin in frunt thereof A
Transparency was tied onto the sine
post with the follerin wurds: "Give US
Liberty or deth. Old Tomkinsis gro
sery was Enumerated with five tin Ian.
tuns and the follering Transparency
was in the winder THE Sub-Merchine
Telegraph d Baldinsville d Stonefeld
Plank Road-the CRATE EVENT. of the
18th centary - may intestines strife
never mar their grandiure"
Simpkinsis sho shop was all ablase
with HANDLES and lanturns. A Ameri
can Eagle was painted onto a flag in q
winder-also the words, yiz-"The Con.
stitooshun must be preserved. The
Skool house was lifted up in crate stile
and the winders filed with notices
among which l noticed the follerin-
"Trooth smashed to erth shall rise
again-you cant stop her" The Boy
stood on the Burnin Deck when awl but
him had fed" "Prokrastinashun il
the Theaf of Time "Be virtoous
and you will be happy" "Intemper
unse has cawsed a heap of trubble-
shun the BoIe, and the folleriu senti
ment written by the skoolmaster, who
graduated at Hudson Kollige. BALD
insville sends greetin TO her Majesty the
| Queen, 4 hopes all hard feelins which
a heretofore preyis bin felt between
the supervisors of Baldinsville and the
British Parliament, If such there has
| been, may now be forever wiped from
our Escutchuns. Bsldinsville this night
reioises over the gerloriOus event Which
seemz 2 crate nsshuns onto one anuth
er by means of 8 electric wire under
the rorin blllers of the Nasty Deep
| QEoSqus tastrseD1, a butter, CaterE,Fg, putsn
/ uostrlun r
Squire Smith s house was lighted VI
regardless of expense. His little son
| William Henry stood upon the rooi
/ firin orr crackers. The old Squire his
selfwa dressed up in sojier clothes anC
stood on his doorstep, pintin his sword
sollumly to American dag which wa
suspended on the top of pole in from
/ Of his house. Frequently be would
take orr his cockedhAt 4 wave it rounC
| in impressive stile, His oldest dartel
Miss IsEbellar Smith, whosh Just com,
home from the Perkinsville Female
Instertoot appeared at the front win
der in the west room as the goddis o
liberty, i sung, ~ see them on thei
windin way" BooteOus !, said / I,
myself, you are = angel a nothin short
er. n BonAparte Smith, the Squire
oldest sun, drest himself up a. Nenu
the God Of Wars and red the Dsclera
eion Of Independence from the lef
chamber window. The Squires wifi
didn't jine in The festiverties. She sais
il was the tArnulest nonsense she eve
seed Sea she 70 sac Squire, 'Cum int
the house and 90 to bed, you old foo
YOU To-morTer you viii be goinl
round half ded With the rhumeFtisn
4 won't gin Us 3 minits peace sill yOl
get well
Sea the Squire, "Betsy, you little ap
preciate the importance Of the even
which we this night commemorate
Sea she, Commemorate q cats tall
cum into the house this instant, 20
pesky old cTitteF" Betsy" ser th
Squire, wavin bis sword, retire. Thi
made her Just IS mad a. she coul
stick. She retired, but cum out Agi
purity quick, with pan full Of bihr