Litchfield enquirer., 1865-08-24

'S ''o oSo "uueFtoOK the SupefvlSlOl fof 4 set of the aforesaid garments. including of course. their wearer It was the height O my yonng ambition that the man should be ey acily by his shirts, concerning which lie began to make complaint inst one moon after tool him in charge. '' 1' ..' 1 What IS the matter with them ? meekl Inquired. .... s. .. ...at sa.-as-.. ..t''
 'There isn't single ono that fits me-
 Totally unsuspic.ons ol the inherent wicked ness of the article concerned, flattere,l mysel that the difficulty womb be easily remedied.- - So ripped here and pasted there. pulled ul this shoulder and pulled down that, till thought that had got it. .' ,-s-
 Mistaken mortal! it would not fit!. LA. 1 made another series of experiments with equally futile results. Then consulted one or two friends. and felt sure I had at last discover ed where the shoe--I mean the shirt-pinched applied a cure. but the thing wasn't cured. - Next l employed tailor to try his skill. Not one whit better The man was getting ng-and was getting desperate .at.a .a- ;. | As my dernter resort, summoned a counci of sewing-society women, and we went into a committee of the whole For hours, we ex pended cur united wits on single shirt often subjecting the luckIess owner to successive tr als of the garment.
 Don't that now fit your neck exactly ? said the head of the conspiracy, as for the forty fifth time We gathered round our victim Why yes,' with charming smile of relief and twisting his head about experimentallv- Really. l can't suggest any improvement
 'Oh! be ioyfulr exclaimed I, clapping my | hands, -aHH at .a'"
 Suppose said one of the wise women, look ing at me over her glasses as if some importan, idea had struck her, suppose We cut out a new shirt on the improved plan, and if that suits take pattern from it.
 Agreed cried I, quite jublant, and ran to a chest for the cotton
 So We cut, basted, and tried on-sewed and tried on-starched, ironel and tried on.
 1T t Capita. affirmed our representative of the lordly sex. Not thread amiss. It is the first time in my life that shirt has exactly fitted me- '.''
 As grateful memorial made up six new nnes after that identical naitarn- Ne antarad on our triumphant epoch. 7 Woe worth the day Must own that be- fore forty eight hours had passed that exactly fitted individual called me aside. and pointed with cruel significance to his neck. .f Tam very sorry with the blandest air in the world. 'Isuppose your mistake came from your great desire not to choke me-
 Mistake choke you r echoed convulsive- y, little tempted to try the latter Don't be troubled. It requires only a lit tie alteration triae cut out of the binding, that is all. You see it's rather large -, Why couldn't he have found it out before?' to myself. Then aloud with great dignity Tell me precisely how much to cut out
 We'll, I should say just about an inch Just about an inch,' muttered sarcastcal ly, adding with a sudden burst of indignation, T believe the mischief is all in your neck which dilates and contracts on purpose to torment me- ,....... H t+s.'''
 He smiled kindly on my wrathfal tears, and I1-well-when the shirt was roughdry. duti- fully cut out the inch, pasted the binding and tried it on again. F- '4'-H'
 That is just what it wanted It does very nicely now. you see, working his chin up and down. }a auli.aH7 Hai-"' D t''"
 '',Yes, see. Idid before. '..'
 Practice makes perfect, and this time you hit the nail on the head'
 When the change was completed, he once more tried on the shirt, and nnequivocally as sured me that it fitted to IT. So made the same alteration in the other five, ard sat down to take bit of comfort
 Can yoneimagine what next happened?
 In the course of n fortnight. the man gave mo an invitation to ride with him, which was only too happy to accept. How extremely gracious and agreeable he was. I might have suspected something was coming. From one thing to another he led the conversation. until finally approached the old hateful topic. (he had on one of his new shirts.) aqa '' 5- ''' ~ ' ''I don't mind my vexation,' remarked in- nocenly. y. now that yeu are at last suited Y Then supposing the matter forever at rest. turned to afpleasanter subject. But coming back to the shirts again, his lace assumed such abF 2 bdFeprecating look, that exclaimed in alarm ..N Nothing ails them now, hope ii s'1'z' ,l Ong serylittle thing, and easily altered. In your fear ofgettiug them too large. they are tri1e too small--only trifle.' aS'aa9t4i't'p s' My heart isweiled, but uttered not d word, When we reached home made him measure m are Fef on his fore6nger exactly how much he wan ted ihsa arted. The shirt he had on appened peil, to be the one had first altered. was sair rortu t nate enouglfto discover in my work basket the veryIpiecs had cut out And I was malicioou: lie.o euoagh to exat at it's proving the exact meas I urei iof the addition wanted. So I sewed i fin again, repeating to myse'f all the while. .Oh the crotchetgness of man Iae8 : ss9Q zisf3 q sdWiH yon believe me when, l whisper it con fdentiaf fy, that after this for many years, Hal ternated between cutting out and putting il Hthe, selfsame piece-the mans. aeet -piayinl