New-York daily tribune., 1865-10-05
parasites, who fve on the vitsls Of the helpless
yotaries Of the Muse.

The first drawback which any resident at Cambridge
must feel very keeny. but especially an American s
the vested rights. privileges perqnsites win wnth
he is surrounded in a perfect network have SAID
ybOdy Ia left free TO choose lis own way of spend
ing his time SO he Is by his ooupoer' but not b, hs
feriors, by those appointed TO wait on hin aho
help him There is connected with an English college
perfect army Of servants marshaed In corps az nee
divisions. regiments, and batta.ions and ali win an
amount OF vested rights enough TO ste one win the
bare enumeration. In the first place. there are the
bedmHlers nominnlly there is assigned 70 every
eight Tooms and she he's one assistant under her
tcsy person appointed 10 this seriously ucrate
and ponsblo place gives II up although ltefy
superunnuGted toothess, aud tOtterng. Accofdihsy
her assistant will grow into two and the TWO VIII
have three or four extra miscellaneous on"s generay
floating round TO do everything that their chiefs me
too lazy 10 do themselves On my own staircase, .uc
bedm Lker in chief hearty young woman OF thr,ynve
six employed old father at least seventy seven OF
eight years Old do ell her hardest work In the way
OF drawing water. etc. Now. these good ladies' are
much in possession OF your premises thsh !ou are
yourself They have key 10 get into yonr room at an
hours, even whep IN some cases OF pecunhr iochs,
the regular custodian has not According 10 ther tists
or fancy they are more or ess on the staircase pus
generally. You sure 10 see them from cary daWn
till noon from four six. and good Dit IN the later
evening They constitute themselves inspectresses,
general over oil your belongings and nha
You are hopeessy In their power and choice
OF submitting quietly to their ultrsdespoto rue or o
carrsg on constant warfare In ,hs you n'o oy -,
one 1yantage. Il superior command OF language 10,
the population Of Cambridge s very slow OF speec anu
wholly uninvcntive But they have the whole eargs
Of everything. their places are very Vaiuaple, anu
they exceedingly ready 10 perform extra services
for extra pay they can make you comfortable OF uh
comfortable Il they will For instance, they attend TO
setting out the breakfast aud tea III your roons @
this they order from the batteries every day apouI
twice ia much bread and butter as man wants anu
at the end Of the day all that's oft goes to them oy I'M
memorial custom, as perquisltes Anu my ,osn
from n dinner breakfast, etc. unless speclHy men
toned bv YOU 30 TO them perqnisites ana 80 on
You not only charged handsome sum In your bi
for their care of rooms but another sePfate ensc o
their beer money; and over and above AL ths every
nndercraduste. not pTofessedly beaehciary Is eA
peced pay good sum more at the end OF every term
a. pnre gratuiiy They form an immense body
eral score all banded together bJ coua0n Interest
grown old in the college, and handing doWntheir power
and properly 10 their neces and daughters sotbt he!
cone no doubt TO regard II as perfect family man
sion, and hold the Undergraduates. and ieiows too
completely IN suDjecion. Their honesty quite apO'e
suspicion-in some cases. -
identity OF and often by real affinity or con
snnguini'y are The ps' nav nave aiIs"' ,he Greot
pai9'd vnsre fGs wcIa The rSps form O principal division
OF the grand army. They are engaged IN waliing
ut the hi, and of them at the low tables IN tue
hall though tne body OF the walters ar, 81 lower
grade each Of them acts as servant TO as many
undergraduates ms choose 20 engage hia' iho Phc'.
nal dues which we conceive belonging 20 servant
in college viz making fires, bringing water ana biscS
inc boots are performed the r,t by the bedmaker
the last two hy the brigade o college boot-barhs me
csp calls ycu Ia the morning, brushes your clothes
your entertainments The les, two duties be performs
when you cen get him to. when some other OF is mutt
farious duties other masters does not call INN on
For al this you pay him regular sum, pretty hgh
when you cor slider bow many masters he h's aud Tor
any extra demands him You expected 10 pay hn
/, extra You are no, nj Trinity Obliged To employ MIN
il you think you dispense With lis scrEces Dat at
; sone oner colleges the gyps Ike the Oxford scouts
are attached to particular ses of rooms ne ena,ac
ter Of the gy j. s less honest AMI accepiape thn
the, of the bclmakers; most Of them are ehrT eniiey
TOO old and worn out or young mpudeni ana tae'lsh
| bad thfcet who was Tremendously PASSIONATE
and an but unnanarrable. though cO)d serynli;
nnothor so wholly old and fasy that nobody could DO
anything with him. and ;hc third one tne dag was di
missed charge II as sting some of hs masters IN
dsrcp1iabe practices Tie whole set inay Do denned
Us lecclcs.
Afier the TYP. come the porer' or these therc ero
Ave cinplovcd ~ Trntg. who haVo an n,rfeshns hh
aurrnprin'ed peculiarly % Themselves. Ihe buvrIn
ulcnt Of England rncelt ltfkcf, Ia consideration OF t.e
established rates oi postage. 10 deliver All letters 20
fleir ernci address. Zach col 80 in Cambridge s -
q rilcl vcrv properly dwelling, M the gnte ~
which & Govrrliu-lt would naturally agree io deliver
,.ers The r,gfers tben nt the monHtTuuf charge of
half penny speor. bell hs much ns the WI Ole prtase
on any or0iuafy letter from end ~ Eutnnd 20 thf
other agree to deliver each one nt your rooms. IA
case yon should wish 10 avoid ibis rofenions ahd i'h
tax aud desire Ia have your letters lcn NJ the poiers
Od.e or The pOst.Ccc. vor cant DO II. for the porter
goes every mHl to the posOiloe With LIS bAf anu by
inmemorim custom takes si tne letters addressed "a
! your college, and can't get them except through
his hands. And this extra postage all goes % tAo
por'ers. ,,,,,ett
We also the bOO'-b,arks VINO IN tbrI nlhChiut,
cut vour toois 70 pieces with a knife. The "indo"
cleaners and g,azieIs, aud an army more. mere
are several servants belonging to the eoheSe
somehow whom the olicnls don't know whft
| Ia mt 10 saw day an old cfea'
ure performing the very tedious process ol crhpng
out tie grass and weeds rein Dftwcen hr paving
of ,he court with gTe labor and To very little Iufpo-r
NJ the scrhpiug turns up the efrih ana 'r|s III
the rcceptOn 81 weeds asked Tlcnd IN huthoI'
| tv why they didn't employ some 0i the chcHl'h' az
structiye agents, with which nfrl uinIh science IS
/ It,Nu Ia
with much moro lasting eject nna save all ts r1ioa'
! nicking ''Wlv" said he chats inst what we don
want 10 snye; we've got these men on our hands h"d
"A, must give them something 10 do
| And this l. the way English college Is eaten up
At every staIe of your cOqrhe. bed. board chaicI'
amusement you are beset by crowd 0i te N'os, WIZ
uuder the name II waiting you. while they are ON
ciousy pressing on you hundred comforts you u"n
want bar 81 the greatest comfort, youi HDrt' hhu
fleece you ln ID thousand ways You cannot nave aN!'
thing done your boots blacked. your clothes washed Ia
your own way but IN sorc special immemoril cGh'th
tonal way which for ought know. u III hIhB h,HIi
Wills original grant And for every service, rear %
nominal thus rendered, You have mol ohiy 10 Pr! We
hut 10 swceten II In thousand Wye ihIee "i iouI
| time. IA term comes a loud knock at the door. Conc
in" siaiUait man enters. dep0siung your , DVols,
which he usually leaves ouiside your door. mana ;
Won fo- A drop OF ale sir. The bOutblack. SIR. Abd
fbi ite means Of washing down the dhguSth oi !ip
Won are expected to furnish all the time TO a SORTS o.
Op!e the bl maker WasheTWohhi' hLu NHitoi !" % ~"
having SPECIAL charge O beei-noney WhF on tiu oil
II YOU are unfortunate enough 20 take s'loiar'hip OF
distinguished degree, every servant, OF uepu," %
from every class oi servants calls upon you WIN 'HlS
sort o. speech: "iAc pOrte-s, sr "lsh 10 cohFIhlu
aie you on getting your schoarshlp ana thHt moan'
mOncy-hAtd sterling coin IN tlNer, aye, OF b"I"' nc
cording - rank Cl the Official; ana Whrb n'o o' az
select committees thus coHgrltnlne yCu u becomes no
slight iaI to poor young man. wb0 prrAhl u ue.
pendent upon this very scholarship Tor SUPPORT Voo
dropped gold ring Ia chapel knew exactly JUS place
but did not want so stop and t up the bassock myteu
so asked The ohare clerk, whoseousincss II Is 10 clean
out the chapel ana wsD s0ts capital pay therefor 10