The Wheeling daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1864-1878, 1865-06-30


ton. Enriehes the makers of fans and
enables proprietors of soda water stands
to keep fast horses.
Stra Yberry festivals are not over yet.
There are lots of Strawberries and
pretty waiter girls left.
Pretty waiter girls you know are con-
trary to act of Legislature
asked my legal friend, d Witt. about
it He says that taken with. strawber-
ries pretty waiter girls are moral en-
tcrtainment.
merely wanted to know, YOU know,
TO satisfy my conscientious scruples.
Since then have taken them without
hesitation,
They agree with me.
That is the strawberries.
~ also agree with the girls.
In They always give me an extra straw
berry and two spoons with my ice cream.
Those spoons are quite a good thing in
cutlery.
They have such a capital edge.
YouNcan cut bread and butter OF open
oysters with them.
l took one home the other night to
shave with. -
should like to get table spoon of
the same variety for a carving knife.
BY way IF variety ! went TO-. =;
A PICNIC.
this week.
Pic-nics, like strawberry festivals, be-
loag to the church service.
They are "a light moral entertainment
They are mostly held in groves:
!. "A grove consists of several trees, a
! grass plot, q platform for the music and
a shanty whore theysel lager. = 81
Thete are numerous groves lying
around about. =. ~"
They ara generally built near railroads
for the convenience of the public and the
profit OF tho railroad companies.
You take your ratioDs tn picnic, i'll a
market basket
witches, hunk of pound cake, q buckle
berry pie, two lemons. a pound of cher
ries, q box of sardines, two boiled eggs
and a pickle.
TIE rest of the outfit consists. of sixty
fNc. Sunday-sohool teachers, twenty. mid
di, eyed ladies, some nice young men, a
dominic OF two, several hundred children.
and brass band.
Get packed in car like box of
oranges, and smothered in white muslin
until you get to the grove, where You
will arrive III state of perspiration and
bliss
Don't be particula, about Your own
basket. Baskets usually get mixed
Take the biggest one you can get. The
ladies always fill their baskets.
When you get in the grove, you are
expected to declare it is the delightful
est spot you ever saw.
Select pretty teacher, and explore
the shadieSt recesses, and pour cut your
soul.
When it is al poured ont, ask the
young lady if she won't take a swing.
She will
Sawyer has sung of Swinging in the
Laue," but don't think he ever tried
swinging in Il grove.
Ibid
was kept at it for three hours and
quarter, swinging all the girls that came
along
tits splendid exercise, beats Burnham's
gymnasium, double trapeze aud all
haven't got over it yet.
And old lady then proposed that |
should climb an apple tree to extricate
her johnny, who had got bis trousers i'm
'volyed ina branch about thirty feet up,
and was hung up like sign of the gol
den fleece
Told the old lady to wait till he got
ripe and he'd drop of his own accord
6 Old lady said was brute and hadn't
got the feelings of mother.
She went for the man who kept the
Park and sold lager. He brought lad
der and restored the aspiring youth to
the fond embrace of his maternal rela-
tive
Whereupon she spanked him for tear
ing his trousers. Al
Which served him right.
We then took dinner - syiJ4
Pretty teacher spread her pocketband-
kerchief for table cloth and unpacked
the rationS.
The rations had got somewhat mixed.
The sardine box had busted and
struck lie" The huckleberry pie had
aa'algamated with the pickle,3 and the
cherries had resolved them selves into
jam,
But it was so charming to eat your
dinner on the grass beneath the umbra-
geOas shade of the noble, trees.
So the pretty teacher observed as /
was squeezing the lemons in dinner
kettle to make the festive beverage,
which neither cheers nor inebriates, but
frequently stomach-aches.
was startled by piercing shrek
fi0p the pretty teacher, and dropped
a hah lemon partly squeezed and flew
10 the rescue. ts. 4.
A 'horridy bug,' descending from the
outrageous foliage previously mention
ed bad alighted on her alabaster neck.
= II di fpatched the creature and we pre-
cseded fe desra'"s r--r"nsst -