The Cleveland leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1865-1865, 1865-08-05
DAILY LEADER.
From London Society," O.
DUB BRILLIANT FAILURE.
a sketeh In UItranarIne.

tn W AAAo 0ANClh = 4O,
have no compunction in adding that 1 hs'
8 wife, 8 family of two interesting ohiIdre
a sDug business, and have been recon
mended to try Bsnting. By this you mn
not imagine that 1 am fat l am Onlyeon
Portable; my angles are PLEASANTLY TounI
cd, and 1 haven't q wrinkle on my chubt
countenance. am of good tempsr-m
wife once termed it sersphic, but since N
recent visit 10 the seaside Lam afraid 81
has not been able tOaspply thRt extrRvi
CANT term with the same CONSCIOUSNESS
its correct signi6csncy as before We-bJ
there, 1 mustn't anticipate. ai-sril',a
Immersed in business from ten TN fVC
4 it is net TO be wondered al that / look fol
> ward to my annual holiday with, if 1 ma,
be allowed the expression, my ments
= mouth watering. 1 an quite aware ths
there is no such 8 thing as ament1 mouth
J though why there should not be when ",
have Shskespeare's authority for the ex
istence of 8 "mind's eye" can't say. Blu
/ never had q very great opinion of poets
{ have had one or two on my books befort
now, and they are not punctusl in theii
payments; far from it. Well, as / wa
saying, when the weather begins TO grow
warm 1 find my place Of business insup.
portable, l soon begin 10 grow warm my,
self and 8 very small amount of sunshine
and e~Xertion overcomes me. My wife ID
something of the same temperament, and
also longs annually for the seaside; for We
don't consider a mere visit to the country
an "out" We like fields, and cows, and all
that sort of thing; but we can have all
that if We drive to Richmond or Ripping
Forest. What we want is q sniff of the
briny, the bracing salt air, the .clammy,
sticky atmosphere, that makes you feel IN
comfortable and happy. 1 am vulgar in
my tastes, and delight in Msrgate. Some
people say they ike to go 70 the seaside
for quiet. Very good; let 'em go. 1 pre-
fer noise. 1 hate quiet I like niggers. l
like Punch. 1 like Judy; and as for your
Esplanades and dullness at your fsshiona-
bic places, they're not in my way, and
that's the honest truth. Now in her heart
my wife delights in Msrgste too. Why,
we went there when we were oourling, and
30 the place has 3 sort of charm for both
of US.
But when 1 suggested Msrgate this year
you should law seen the ex pression of my
wife's face. Il was grand. 1 knew what
it meant We've lately grown acquainted
HAhAh NIB hlhChAAhOcu O1-EQuhf6s q NGTF
genteel lady she Is, and mighty grand no
tons she's imbued my wife with-hOrrOr of
Msrgste being n OF them.
"Mrs. Macintosh tells me that Margste
is unbearsble this season such a set Of
peoPleP said Mrs. Cooler to me when I
mentioned my faVOrite haunt
"Bother the people" 1 replied al sup
pose you want Brighton with the sun in
your eyes all day, and everybody dressed as
if they were going into the Park"
ooh, dear nc p said my wife, with a toss
of the head; dts not the season at Brigh-
tos yet"
Pretty changes had taken place in my
Wife's notions since Mrs. Macintosh made
her acquaintance. She never used to lay
such stress On its being the season in fact,
she was rather partial TO the earlier por1
ton of the summer or the autumn, lodg!
ings being cheaper at those times. Well,
from Brighton 1 went through all the sea-
side places 1 could think Of; but Mrs.
Cooler had an objection to, them all. /
began at last 10 have serious fears that we
should miss our seaside out altogether, for
Mrs. Macintosh had something tOssy
against every place. My wife determined
70 90 nowhere tout of the season" so really
our choice was limited, IS those places
whose seasons fell late in the year were out
of the question. l must take mysix weeks
in the summer, you see, and so, the Isle of
Thanet being shut against usQOr Rsmsgsts
shared the Macintosh denunciation, and
BrOsdstsirs / kicked at myself,) L begsntO
feel uncomfortable. l at one time imsg.
ined Mrs. Cooler was about to propose
Boulogne, in order to come back with 3
foreign flavor; but she can't even go TO
Kew by the boat without being i'll for the
day; and as TO my opinion of Frenchmen
well, there, if you wan to get my back
up, mention EN-, that's all.
Asluck would have il, Mrs. Maekintosh's
mother fell very i'll about this time, and
the genteel friend had TO go abroad, which
was 3 great relief to me, for of all the
women 1 ever knew she-but there, /
say nothing, she's in a foreign land, poor
thing, and L can only pity her.
She had gone, it is true, but the genteel
viper we had been nOurishing in the family
bosom had left its sting.
She recommended Mudville. at present
you, of course, are by NO means impressed
by the enOrmity of recommending Mud
vile. You don't know Midwife, never
heard of Midwife, and will probably not
find Midwife on the map. But wait.
Hear more, and, L was going to add, avoid
Midwife, but that advice would be super
huous, for q description of my visit to, and
nv treatment at that den of - but there,
again you'll excuse me, ENSURE, when you
have read q few columns farther.
We were sitting at tea a social meal in
which 1 deIight-nobOdy ever quarrels
over tea; its far beyond dinner in my opin-
ion. We were seated at tea, Mrs. Ooodler,
myself, and Grimley, an old friend. Grim;
ley had . disagreesble knsck of making
himself universally unpleasant We're it
not for this be would be = very nice fellow.
He is Whist they call q rough diamond, ard
takes a pleasure in being rude; but, as |
say, it's bis only drawback. HPsss the butt
tered Toast, Grimley," l said with a smile,
for 1 was in a good temper, and was eating
more than was pIudeBt.
"Sooner keep you for q day than q week.
replied the rough diamond, with bis mouth
full of muffin.
Nv wife threw agIsnce at Grimley that
would have snnihilsted many men, but he
didn't notice it.
TYou p o in for tea as if YOU were at'the
seaside" remarked Grimley, after a pause
Disagreesble as was the remark, l was
grateful to my friend for making il, for I
had been longing to touch uponlth sub
iect of our summer tour, and hadn't known
how to approach it. My wife frightened
up too, and left off looking black, a thing
she always does when GTimley comes. 1
can't ssy why, but women are queer cres
lures, and Mrs. Ooodler is 10 exception to
the rule.
"Wish 1 wal at the seaside" IexclAimed,
throwing a side glance at my wife.
GAhi indeed" sighed Mrs o. IE4Q 4.
"Why don't you 60, then ?" gtunted our
agreeable friend.
0"Thats just it" replied I, hurriedIy;
why don't we, eb, Jane2'
Jane didn't know she was sure. For
her part she was ready to go tomorrow.
aMsrgate again, L suppose" sneered
Grimley he had dreadful habit of sheer
ing-sl rough diamonds have.
"Msrgate indeed |" said my wife, with a
toss of her head. "Oh dear, mol no more
of your Margates " then, after a pause, she
added with most irritating emphasis, snort
your Rsmsgates."L a /
Now this was quite uncalled. for, as we
had never stayed 81 Ramsgate, nor had I
suggested that we should. 4s
Grimley had always. abused MsrgRte.
Nnm houavar he asnnuged the oausa Ofti