East Saginaw courier. (East Saginaw, Mich.) 1859-18??, 1865-04-19
REBEL PHILOSOPHY ExrMplIFIsO.
Letter from Orpheus G. Kerr---How
the South Feels Under It's Re-
verses---All Disasters but Bless
ings in Disguise. "af

r the South Feels Under It's Re
3 verses----All Disasters but Bless
, ings in Disguise. nt
Orpheus c. Kerr is ont in a char
| acteristic letter TO the New York Leader.
in which he capitally takes off thu
very satisfactory manner in which
Rebellion receives its continued and
repeated disasters. Capt Bob Shorty
personates the Federal Government
while Capt. Munchausen figures az
the Confederacy: n
Right behind me came n remarlxa-
p,o uelnp, a,a,rra IN rraginvirts ''ii oi grey
cloth and prodigious thicket OF
whiskers, through the latter part OF
which his eyes glowed yellowly like
the bottles in an apothecary's shop
down the street. AS he approached
nearer he hastily put on pair OF
partially dissected white cotton gloves,
and casually re-arranged the strip OF
carpet binding which served him as a
full dress cravat.
"Yeurs, truly" said Capt. Bob
Shorty.
"Vandal % hissed Capt. Munchau-
sen, removing from his brow an un-
exampled conglomeration Of rags in
the last stages Of cap, and handing
it to faithful contraband who attend
ed him.
"Why, then," said Capt Bob
Shorty, doffing his own cap, and tuck
ing up his sleeves :" in the name of
the United States of America, pro-
pose to move upon your works imme-
diately"
| And now, my boy, do particularly
lament my lack of those unspeakable
intellectual gifts which enable the
more refined reporters of our excel
lent and moral daily journals to des-
cribe the fistic achievements Of the
noted Arkansas Mule and celebrated
Jersey Bantam in manner that de-
lights every well,conducted breakfast
table in the land, and furnishes ex-
quisite reading for private families.
Forward hoped Capt Bob Shorty,
as though on springs, his elbows neat
ly squared, his fists held up like a
couple of apples on stick, and his
head poised as though it had Just
started to look round corner. With
fists to match and eyes shining like
the bottoms Of glass bottles, the wary
Munchausen scufiles cautiously back
from him in half circle. Now they
make skips toward each other; and
now they skip back. Anon an arm
is raised and is porried and then
they balance TO partners; and then
they hop back.
/ was gazing at all this, my boy, in
speechless admiration, when suddenly
l saw the dexter hand of Capt. Bob.
Shorty, pierce the enemy's lines, and
explode with tremendous force on
Munchausen's nose. For moment
there was a sound as Of Confederate
blasphemy but in a moment the
chivalric Munchausen was himself
again. e,.-
"Ah ~ said Capt. Bob. Shorty,
agreeably, "did you see the Star
| Spangled Banner that timer
"Sir," said Munchausen, with tears
in his eyes, "I am thankful that my
nose is broken. 1t is blessing for
had nothing to smell with it, and
only wasted my strength in its special
defense"
Here Captain Bob. Shorty looked
iovially at me, my boy, and says he !:
"By all that's Federall amt he
jollyg"
"Come on to thy ruin?" roared the
Munchausen from behind his rapidly
increasing nose and again the battle
ragged.
Now did Capt. Bob. Shorty sidle to
the left, with a view to flanking; but
two columns Of the enemy met him
there. Next the agile Munchausen
attempts, by quick turn, to take
him in the rear of his position, but
finds strong body Of five divisions
hauled upon his headquarters with an
impetuosity that knocks out half his
teeth.
cart satisfied, Horatiop" said Capt.
Bob. Shorty, with more or less Bow
cry theatre in his manner.
An awful smile appeared upon what
were left Of the features of Capt.
Munchausen. 1t was so full of scorn,
you know.
"Sir," said he, with much chivalry
Of bearing and some difficulty of ut
terance, " my jaw may be broken, but
/ thank fate for it. It's long time
since had anything to eat with my
mouth, and TO defend it at all was
useless"
4 "Ha, ha! hap roared Capt. Bob.
Shorty. ''I really never did see any
thing so jolly"
"Madman" yelled Munchausen,
"your destruction is decided?"
Then were all the skips and hops
repeated, my boy; with such orna.
mental bits of occasional fine art as
the refined reporters Of our excellent
moral daily journals love TO dwell
I fondly upon. Were / but such a re-
porter, / would describe the scene il
a way to mako you take it home tc
your children. But let me not waste
time in lamentation for just then, {
something heavily fell upon the righ
eye of Capt. Munchausen, and effect
ually closed it for a week.
4 "Ahw said Capt. Bob. Shorty
pleasantly, "did you count the star
, npon our flag that time, my gray
backT
"Sir," retorted Munchausen, stag
+ gering about, and wildly pulling hand
I'll c,lls 80 ;,n,,orcanfihle hair ont of in