Marshall County Republican. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1856-1878, 1865-12-21

RAIL ROAD HorEL, BouRBos, Dec. IS, IS.
DEW MArr:-"A. C.""is not dead, but sleep
eth,'-nary dead-and is sober ~ an undertaken
natl Gazette viewing the mountain of rejected
manuscript from bis "3ourbon Correspondent"
whom he employs at salary Of $500 per annum.
Yes. "A, c." is sober Very, very wrctchedy
sober. as marry punch" has he got to day-not
outstanding you broadly limited that sundry
punches" we're in store for him from generous
hearted Bourbonites.
After reading your promise of something in the
punch" line for "a. c." he made haste to don
his "best bib and tucker" his most bewitch:ns
face, "allkilingest smile." all EARNED and equip
ed with good and reliable pair Of legs, (exeu.s
the eIpression), he bravely stsked forth from his
peaceful home, from his squalng wife and scod.
ing children-to be severely "Punched"-if any
we're disposed to "stand treat
The sad, sad story is, in word, "a. C.'s" sober
sober! All he came in contact with, on this
round, we're TOO obtuse to know what was due
correspondent" Each "blade" appeared too
dull for use. but. on the approach Of genuine
"Quill' "cut," but dared not punch" fellow
Consequently "a. c." is most distressingly sober.
Cans you, dear Matt, give poor brother ga real
nice 'Puneh'" from your own private Bowl" as
you so thoughtlessy raised hopes in the heart and
stomach (of"yours devotedly,") that never will
be realized unless you let him "smile" with you7
Thank you, Matt, dear! You're q "jolly old
brick"
But who i. IA. GU is the question that now
agitates this community. Many said to be
him, falsely, a. q matter OF course. and not few
"swells" have been voted the yeritabie "a. c."
beyond peradven.are. And some of these chaps
have been taking on ai-s-only allowable in cor
of a a All afto and
too, at the expense Of "A. C's" proudly earned
reputation ~ as LITERARY genius" (i)(D
One audscious NJ. d. is greatly pleased with
himself and everybody around him because he is
aaid TO be "a. c." the Correspondent" and even
begins to plume himself on his proudly earned
distinction ~ literary msn--taking to himself
thousand and one novel and unbeconing, but Ia
dcrous Styles even kisses his finger tips to my pref
fy "eaIieo" ~ he passes her window!.!! ID, adrise
me Matt, my faithful friend, what TO do with this
fellow! Please advise something DEsrkAArK, for
he ought In good faith, to be squeehed; my little
duleinie may "soUR" on my hands, because Of this
fellow.
BY areal jolly "bslling" Of newly married couple.
But Alas! A les! The lady is yet unm arried;
the gentleman yet "singlc and blessed" They
had taken drive together, and, Of course, folks
had perect right TO say "they are married." and
belled them accordingly. But when "our now
Press arrives hero the world will be posted as to
our "comings and goings." You did not know
that Bourbon is to be '.big place" with "print-
you'll Yes, that's %; for one M. D. here is to
furnish the "cash"JD and anothe- NJ. d. the
"brains"(7) to run the machine. Sometimes big
businesses are conducted on swou capital! like the
Plank Road scheme. or Bourbon enterprise"(D
A Plank Road Cow eutiou was to have been
held here the Cd inst. Vas extensively advertis.
ed. Eminent speakers! A ga-lorious time for
Bourbon merchants TO make money: The day
arived-al we're too busy TO attend the "Corpea.
hon." IT COLLAPSED! So do !, SCARCELY
s.t-t- AC.