The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1865-02-22

WHOLE NO. 1876.
Anythings.
The Winona Democrat says a regula
| meat baby was left on the door step of
minister Of that city with card attached
the card read "take in your own" Thi:
is quite an impossible story {. . There
will be A eclipses in 1865: of the moon
April 10th; Of the sun, April 25th
not visible here; of the moon Oct. 4th Of
the sun in Nov, partly visible in the U. s.
...."Gen. Sherman's wife is said to be jeal.
Gus because he called on augusta on his
way to Save Anna." "....A young lady re.
turned the photograph Of faithless beau,
with both eyes picked out. Wasn't she
mads....A little boys toy. horse lost its
ears, tail and legs. Observing its ragged ap.
pearance, he said: Mother, does God see
everythiug?" eyes, my dear" "Oh wont
he laugh when he sees my horse ~ is
vowels? PROFESSIONALLY. A passenger
asked an Irish boatman if anybody was
ever lost in the stream they were crossing.
"Niver, sur: my brother Mike was
dhround here last week, but we found him
the next day.. Revivals are going on
all over the country. In Winona recently
six were baptized in the river. "A Pc
troleuna department is now suggested 1t
is designed probably to make the Freed.
mans bureau run smooth ."What are
you opening the cellar window for, Pat?
to let in the light? "No yer honor, to Let
out the dark ?"... Some one says: Mar.
ried happiness is glass ball folks play
with it during the honeymoon, till, falling,
it is shivered to pieces; and the rest of
life is wrangle about who broke it. 80.
The first institution given to our race
was the Sabbath, the next was marriage.
Reader, give your first thoughts to heaven,
the second TO your wife. u. A cotempora.
ry, noticing the appointment of a postmas.
ter, says: If he tends to the mails as we'll
as he does to the females, he will make
very attentive and efficient officer "A
precocious young man, blessed with the
name of Isaac, says that "if he is drafted
Abraham will be offering up Isaac as
sacrifice"
In Courtland, New York, widow was
serenaded on the night of her second mar.
rIase. The party was invited in, treated to
drugged wine and retired sick and ii, ST.
lence. .....A writer in Cooley objects to
dropping the from the name Of the Sa-
riour. We agree with that writer exactly:
let all common words be changed but not
the name of the Sacred One. . A negro at
Detroit was solicited to enlist but declined.
To frighten him into it, he was mock
court-martialed and condemned to DEATH
He vas given an hour to choose between
enlistment or death at the expiration of
LIE tl1ne, ne placed MS mana graceruIiy on
his heart and said: "Gentlemen, you can
kill dis chile, but he doesn't 20 into de
army ~. An oil picture in Harpers rep.
resents a man asleep, bare. headed, with an
"Oil Greek" running up his back. The
room in which he is, is filled with placards
of stocks for sale, while countless streams
Of oil are spirtng out Of his brain, and
'mps of all kinds are catching the fluid in
barrels. Cne little imp personating the
deuA is boring the head of the sleeper for
another we'll. A lady skater fell on her
breast on the ice and extended her hands:
a companion passing rapidly by her at the
moment, cut three Of her fingers off %.
There is colored paper in New Orleans,
edited entirely by the shady citizens. 1t is
appropriately called the Tribune. -. A
young lady named Spurgen suicided her
self with revolver at Kirkvile, Waupello
county, Iowa. No cause given. :. Pat and
his master had returned from q trip to We.
suvius and were talking much about lava
before the other. servants. Said one, "what
is this "lavy" that ye're talkin of all the
time" "Only drop Of the Crater" was
the reply.
A lunatic asylum in Paris cost s3,Ooo,-
900. There must be many crazy people in
France. At camp Douglas there are
! 400 rebles in the sick list: Six die each
day. The common disease is "nostalgia,"
or home sickness. "A sympathetic
young man visited the Maine prison. See
ing an innocent young girl there, he asked
what was her crime. She politely ans
wered, she had "stolen mill, and on going
back after the pond she was taken upI'
A fellow in Cleveland paid heavy income
tax, married wealthy girl on the strength
oft, and then confessed that love sug.
gested tho ruse. He had borrowed his
Mothers watch to raise the x!....A
bill has been reported in the House giving
$500 per annum to the five surviving Rev
olutionary pensioners until their DEATH
They are Samuel Cook, 80 years old, Sam.
uel Downey, 90, and Alex. Maroney, %. of
New York; VIM. Hutchings, 100, of Maine,
and James Barham, 1ol, Of Missouri. 80.
Hashessh is preparation from East
India hemp and is used by the natives in
lieu Of opium. II produces intoxcation,
mania and speedy death. -. In the reign
Of Henry With. boiling to death was
the penalty for poisoning. A beautiful
girl was thus executed. Boiled potatoes
will do if theJ are done but boiled girl
only think Of it 2. Just before leaying
N. Y. on the China, Gen. Mcclellan was