The Cadiz sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1864-1911, 1865-03-29
BRICR FSMEE;GY STRIKES
FETEK ULEUM, -.

snd exOseding much of the oil treaced
forth. And | am reh oiho. To find so
much grease doth wei agTease with me. l
EkirInis he'd from gaIrst upon the oil region.
Ever since L became born, my poverty has
beea hard to be borueI 1 have sufsred-I
have been bored by creditorsl My credit
was run into the ground. People thought
me rich meanwhile, and a very meanwhile
itwas, too. They thought had plenty Of
money; go they wanted pay down for what
I'bolght. Not wishing TO humor people,
albeit something Of humoriSt, perhaps |
will not pucha se many things leased,
bored, bought III Veni, yidi, Wei 0il-i
He'll Greass-ll Oils well that ends well;
i:elme. Idnlls1 a hole through a rock,
snl already have been awarded with so
much of the fuel being prepared for the e.
nal conaagraton, that fear the last boil
viii eHd in a great izzle as did the Dutch
Gap Canal.
And now am rich-lnore rich than any
man or any other. have lots Of money
now, when have no use forit.
What queer world. Nothing like oil
Folks say, "Hollol here's Honorable Mr..
Brick, just struck, a fortun'. Dsucgd Hue
low, Mr.. Brick Three months since was
plain Brick. It's all owing to Petroleum.
And now for splurge. Brown stone
house on Fifth Avenue, with brown stone
front designed by old Brown himself, on
both ends of it. Red horses with green
tails, pink eyebrows, blue ears, chocolate
colIred eyes, frizzled name and matchlcss
style. Yellow wagon with black sides, pur.
pie binlls and brown top, a Ia clam she'll -
Etheopean driver with white kids, solielino
stockings, magenta hat band, and false teeth
on gGsta percha base Aud sixty-four
oxstaye ethiopiana with brecatelle drawers,
tha; modesty may not be shocked by looking
ct the legs thereof! And library devoted
to d-backs, brown backs, maroon-backs,
and even ''greenb backs!" Darn the expense
quothes |. And III have a palk in the
woodshed and bathing tub full Of oil in
the church, and wild buffalo TO cut steak
ffosl-and oysters large as Lincoln's major
ity, and bouts with round toes and square
heels, and seat in some fashionable church,
and new hoop-skirts for all my hired girls,
and will employ so many riggers to wait
on me, that oll lie have to do will be to be
happy. OhPcte! Let be kiss you for your
Ma And II lay abed mornings, and sit
up all night, and bore my friends oil day,
till they cant bare-l it! Talk about honest
Industry, saving wood for the dust, opening
oysters for the shells blacking boots merely
to see your face in them, and being honest
forty years waiting Tor some rich man to
adopt you! Played Petroleum is the boy.
And now I'll live high. Out of my house,
vain pomp! Away from me, cold cuts,
crackers, cheese, muSh boiled, No. 5 mack
crel, warmed up soup and briiantappetite.
I've strrcG Pete! "'
Now, when go on the street, folks run
to the windows and smile. And they smile
at me on the street And they ask me to
smile in Ginua( Cock Tails house. And they
all have kind word 0, Pete! you re the
Roleum for ne! Things in my limited
kingdom ism t as they used to once was-
Farewell, ragged ha1ii,ments. Good bye,
hungry stomach! Oil river, cold shoulder!
It's oil right now. Ten years ago Buggins
would Mt speak to me, cause | wasn't well,
financially speaking Buggins is now as
when would Wedlock those rich girl who
50 sweety was unto me, her cruel parents
said, 20, poor, but honest youth, entice
thyself hcnce And | cnticed--nobody!-
Now, those girl, and those cruel parieuts,
wish me to call. How are you, bettered cir
cumstances? It is good to remember oil
these things! And the time dWulls in those
fond recolections Of mine as how l was not
wanted at fashionable parties. Now the
doors ay wide, and ebony angels of shoddy
swing the panels for me to enter and revel
0, Pete, you're oil right, my boyl
Money! More than would wad c0lum-
bad! Everybody is willing to trust me now
/ have no need fov credit. Rich folks are
deuced glad to see me now. They did mt
once. Great is Peter Oieam, and boring is
its profit Just to think it, How | used
to once dig potatoes on saares-turn grind |
stones for ti,n--milk cows for tn, bltter
milk k-cotton strings for suspcnders- boss
old boots Or freeze toes-hred man $ hat or
get tanned-second table or not at all
dirty fingered type-stickcr" or poor me-
chanic--go afoot or stay behind! Oil is Il
dream now Stare hilarious days for power
ty are over and sholly is indeed cnvious.
Guess | can kiss Matilda Jerusha now,
and her dal wont object for I've struck ile!
Thinktailor will have time to make those raj
ments for Soon Think landlord won't insist
upon moving out OF his abode, Things Is
working now. Another vein is opened
And you don't know how nice it is. If |
go on a "bum' folks look over it now. -
When was poor they looked into it. /
=, can kick b6ot-blacks, snuo poor people,
break car windows, throw goblcts at walters,
visit questionable places, hufrah for any
man l wish to, wink at whose wife wish
to, tie my team to shade trees, stand on
church cushions with dirty feet, Jam peo-
pies hats down over their eyes, tell man
he liar, spit on the cGrptt,~ get drunk or
sober. swear or not as | please, and it's oil
right. for I've struck Pete And | can sit
~ up oil night, and raise much harmony.
No one objects. Mrs, Siggius says ! am
the incest man ever she sawed. Mrs Pig
, geriy says is the most ieiigftingisL geuiie-
man she ever knowed. The Stggins and
Piggeriy girls say that i am most exquisi-
tious! It's oil on account Of Peter Oieum,
who has lately come to see me.
And I'm omit now. Have left my meas
ure for set Of diamonds size ofa coal bed. -
And / have ordered silk shirt, satin stock
iugs, MORE antique elastics, and a gold sha-
wing cup. And I'll have a guitar, harp, or
gan piano, and tinkling cimbalin hehouse,
oiled with petroleum. SO they will play easy.
And my hair, my whiskers, my pocket
handkerchiefs, my big clothes and my little
clothes shall bask in barrel OF petroleum
while I sleepraO, Pete, I'm fixed at last
Tlltound church or founder horse. III
buy horse-raiiroad, and run it with petro-
lednl; hire religious editors to puff me into
Christianity, bufa 1omination ioriat office,
and become as. stiff as oi-boiled silk. Go
way, poverty, I'm wearied Of Your caresses!
You have, a large society, but I don't appre-
,ciste your grip. Your bylaws are tight,
but against MY constitution. Now | can
rive advice. ard ii will be needed. It nice
to have struck ile-one has so many moe
friends than he ever thought for and peo-
ple take such an interest in you. can go
on change, buy few thousand shares on
call, self gold long or short, deal in stocks at
buyers option. have private boz at the
opera, shake bands with old Mr. Nahob,