Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1865-08-09

A better burlesque we do not remember
to have seen than the following. Its chief
value however, is that it is ''too troo:''
SAINTS REST, (which is in the Stait
Nv Moo Gersey, July II, 1865
| hev bin in Washington, and while ther
was interdoost to Gineral Marion Sumpter
Fitzhoo Gusher, NV Mississippy. | wus
anxious meet with Represent ative Dim
ekrat NV the South, interchange views, .
hev soothin condolences . unbuzzim, becoz
for the past yeers the Dimekratik party
hez bin trooly seckshunal, and the seckshin
it hez okepied is not the identikle seckshin
unto which the orhces is lokated, and only
by perfec union with our wunst-loved
brethren Nv the South, kin we ever git In
to trooly Nashunal ground
Gineral Gusher is troo gentleman Nv the
raal Suthern skool. He put G. S. A arter
his name, unto the hotel register, and his
rings, buzzum pin, and the head NV his cane,
is all made Nv the bones wv mizerable Yam
kee soldiers who fell at Bull Run-he sez by
his own hand, and it must be so, for who
ever knode suthern man to boast vain -glo-
riously? We met and embraced, weepin
perfoosely.
.'Alarsr' sobbed the Gineral, ''wat
nitemare hez obskoord our respective wish
uns for the past yeers. | wuz alluz u
nion man, alluz alluz alluz The old
flag / loved with more nor parental afec-
shun-to me it wuZ more nor life -
why then, my Ajacks, sobbed /, did
s'Why? my beloved. Because my stait
secesht, and [ wuz carried along by tor
rent NV public opinion which [ Good not
stem, and | went with hur But its all O.
yer. We huv awok, and | am here, in the
capital NV my beloved country, under the
shadder Nv that glorious flag which is the
pride Nv Americans and the terror Nv all
weak nashuns which hez territories contigu-
Gus, ready to take the oath and resoom the
citizenship laid orr, and agin run the guy
ment for It's own honor and glory"
'Hev 700 a pardin?" sez l. Me thinks
wunst paper recht my humble village,
wich is unanimously Dimmekratick-(itcu it cum
around package of goods from Moo York;
NV the orfshers who killed the niggers at
Eoyt Pillow Am [ rite?"
Y ou air. I'm gushin child NV nachur
IN enthoosiastick. Labrin under the
same deloosion that secesht US, | believed at
that time wuz doin good thing in KILN
them property Nv ours that Linkin he'd
shovd bloc kotes onto. [ have no apologies
to offer-T II now written justifcashun.
Il, and [ speak for thousands Nv the
shivelrous suns Of the South who would
like a good square meal wunst more, am
willing to be consiliated. The oppoortconity
is now offered the government to corsiliate
us. We are returnin prodygle sons-kill
yoor fattId veel and bring out yoor gold
rings, and purple robes and sich. We ask
condish ns-we shell insist on terms, but we
air disposed to be reasonable We are will
lin to acknowledge the soopremacy Nv the
b,,+ +lor Io
shen A proud, high spirited people like
us uns, won't stand it-no sir, we cannot.
Their must be no banking, no confcashen,
no disfranchisin. We are willin to step
back jest ez we slept out, resooming our old
status, trustin the engineerin to git sich nth
er pints ez air not here enumerated. With
out them condishns the union wood not be
wun Nv hardwood be holler mockery.
Wat we are goin for is union founded on
luv, wich is stronger and solder than mus
kits. Harts is trumps-let the platform be
harts and all is well.
But Gineral,' sez I, ''in all this wat do
700 perpose fer us Northern Dimocrats p
Towards them our bowilssmelt with luv.
We forgive 700. Eff 700 kin take the old
attitood, well and good-ef not
Hold, sez |, don't threat. A ginoo-
inc Northern Dimekrat wants but little here
below, but wants that little thing. Give
him small post offs, niger driver to
a angel in glory wuz two offer trade places
with him, harp, golden crown and all, he
wood ask odds.
''Uv course them positions 700 kin hev-
we don want EN-. All we ask is to make |
the platforms, and hev sich offisis ez hawty, |
hightoned men kin afford to take, and 700 |
uns kin heV the rest.
But wun thing must be understood. !
The scenes NV the Charleston Convenshun |
must never be re-enacted-their must be no |
Duglissis. Under the new dispensashen
700. dance whenever we fiddle, askin no |
questions Suthern harts must never agin |
be fired-it wood consume itself.
.Ez soon ez [ hev took the oath, [ shell |
mmegitly go hum and run for Congris-
see to it that We hev enuff Dimikrats ther |
that we, jintly, kin control things. Wv |
coarse, In a union Nv luv, there must be e.
quality Linkin' S war debt must never be |
pade onless ourn is-his hirelins must never |
leliteful specktacle | Men who, yesterday, |
vuz a gougin each other onto the feeld Nv |
battle, to-day is drawin penshuns amikabiy
rom the same treasury. The eagle wood |
lop his wings with joy, and angels wood ex-
claim 'BullyP [ am disabled from wounds |
received on the feeld, and rejoice that our /
penshun laws is SO libral.
''Go home, my friend, and marshel fer the /
conflict Tell your central commits to col
ect expend mummy, and [ and Ginril Forist.
md Kernel Moseby, and Champ Ferguson,
md Dick Turner, and Boregard, and per
naps that noble 'ero take orr yoor hatwhile |
| pernounce his gellorious name) Ginral /
Robert E. Lee, will cum up and stump the |
North fur yoor tickits. ! hev dun. go. .
ssNnhlo mon ;, fhnrf I ez he talkt ma