The weekly union record., 1865-04-01
THE UNION RECORD.
Worse Than an Oil Well.

fruSSlan py the name OF MdrkWaTl,
who lived among the Bushwhackers up
at Lederville, in Montgomery county; );
he was a paper-box maker by trade,
but, with the many-sideness of Ger
man, be was also an excellent taxider-
mist as well as thorough naturalist;
and, during his what might be called
leisure hours, collected quite large
number of our Pennsylvania birds,
beasts and reptiles. Amongst the beast
liest of beasts he had stuffed skunk,
or polecat, that he had mounted with
great care, and so naturally that you
always looked at it head on Having
some property left him in Prussia, he
went over there to get it, and took with
him his collection of stuffed birds, etc.,
including the skunk. After his arrival
in the Fatherland he sold them to quite
an advantage, particularly the skunk,
which, being curiosity there, affected
the beholders to bid quite high price
for it. He received orders, on his re-
turn to America, to send over three or
four more of these polecats; and, as he
had detailed the strength of their per-
fume to his countrymen, he had also
promised to bottle some up and send it
over with the animals. This was before
Petroleum was widely known.
Shortly after Markwart's return from
Prussia, as | was one day driving
through Lederville, thought | would
call in and have talk with him; so |
drove up to his house, tied my horse to
the fence, and went through the garden
to the house. As | passed along |
smelt something very unpleasant, and
believed, at first, it must be sour -crout,
then Limburgher cheese, then asafetl
da. Reaching the front door, the cheer
full welcome that Markwart gave me
drove the nuisance out of my thoughts
for a minute but as sat in the kitch-
en-, it gradually grew and grew in in
tensity of pungency, until | SAID to the
old man that there was curious per-
fume in the room
81 joost dinks so too, mineself," said
he; ''and delis mine vrow dis morgens
dat she moost take de YARDS out ov de
kitchen. rite away. It's de YARDS schmell
so."
"Vell now, Toctor," spoke his good
wife, who was busy making pumpernick-
ell, or hard bread. II dinks it's de old
mans schmokepipe. He's schmoking
allie weile in der house Der YARDS
schmell so goot as never vas but it's
der pipe tobac' as ish not so pleasant"
"Oh, my goot Katchcn, heraus NIT
der schmokepipe! joost dinks some
dings; it's de cats, de katz -
Cats up chimney - asked |, aston
ished at the idea.
"Yaw, so Eve got drce cats, yaw,
tree cats up dere.'
'Dead cats -
"Yah so deadcr as never vas. Mine
vrau she makes somootch rou bout dem
in der booro' drawer in der bet cham
Der dat | dakes EN- und hangs EN- up in
der cellar but she says dat won't do.
So | boots 'em in der big clock case
dere in de corner; bote she makes great
row bout dat; so yinally | dakes 'em
und hangs 'em up der gimney, no
madder as they do gifts smoked. So'
''Three dead cats hanging up the
chimny? What have you got these cats
for p
81 got's 'em to send to Charmany
for dey have no bole -catz dere-''
''Oh, no! pole-cats now | under
stand"
''Yas, bole catz, or shkunks; dey're
pretty leetle dings, und | backs 'em up
in box some of desc vine morgens und
sends 'em to Brussia by der stimboats.
Bote come aus der haus to dor garden /;
| got some dings dere will sorprise you,
| kess."
As Markwart always had something
new to me to show-one time ground !
nuts j; another time Italian broccoli an
other time cultivated mushrooms, or
artichokes, the fruit and not the root of
which was eaten-I went out with HIM
expecting some new SurpnSe-anu L
met it Coming to a small pile of
earth, he plunges his hands in, and dig
ging with his fingers, brought out what
appeared like large tuber of some new
species. Intensely interested, I squat
ted down and stopped over it. As the
earth fell off | saw it was a porter bot
tie, and at the same instant he pulled
out the cork, and putting it directly
under my nose, said with great empha-
sis:
"How you likes dat p
If that porter bottle had held half a
pound of powder and a match had been
applied to it | could not have been
knocked over much quicker than | was
upon Markwart's taking out that cork.
Staggering to my feet, | fairly run to
where my horse was tied, and loosening
him, jumped into the saddle. There
stood Markwart, bottle in hand, with
ewes the size of clans.