The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1865-02-10
AND PROPRIETOR.
NUMBER z.
Spare Lines.

Spare Lines. 2
Quilp says the spiritualists have become %
poor that they haven't u rap Ieit.
If q man advises you to do wrong thing,
resent it, for ho virtually bids you 60 to tho
Devil.
Why arc young ladies like arrows1 Be-
cause they are oil in quiver when the beaus
como.
II some men had their limbs broken they
would be cripplcs for life their bones would
be to lazy to knit.
A critic, malignant enough to tell tho
truth, says that tho most awkward thing Ia
nature is woman trying to run. 81.
What is tho difference between summer
dress in winter and an extracted tooth? Ono
Is too thin, the other tooth out. III,
What Is the difference between bantam
cock and dirty housemaid? The one 10 o
domestic fowl, and the other fowl domes-
tic. s
A grave gentleman asked us the other day
if black.lcg sheep were more disposed to gam.
Dol than Others. We have referred the mat
ter to Gen. Wool.
An impertinent fellow wishes to know II
you ever sat down to tea where skim milk
was on the table, without being asked, "Do
you take crcam?"
Suppo 10 men start from opposite corn
- a Al. A.
wards the centre, which will be likely TO
meet the other first?
The most influential man In free country
at least, is tho man who has the ability ss
well rs the courage to speak what he thinks
when occasion requies 1t.
The editor Of denomina tional paper at
the West says: "a man needs grace to cd.
II q religious paper properly at any time, but
especially when he has the rheumatism"
A p,rson who signs himself "Jones." asks
whether, II Admiral Porter makes many moro
reports about the Fort Fisher business, he
ought not to bc called Admiral Reporter.
I call every man intolerant from principle,
who conceives no man can bo man OF vir-
tue and probity who does not believe exactly
what he does, and numerically consigns to
perdiction oil those who do not think like
himself.Q
A traveller who met countrvman In noun
ing, made the observation, "You have lost
some Of your friends, sce." "Yes, sur"
was the reply. "Was II near or distant
relativc2" well, putty dlstant-'bout twen-
ty. four mile"
An Trish physician was called to examine
the corpse Of another lrishmsn, who had
been assassihated. "This person." said he,
after inspecting tho body, "was 30 III. that
if no had not been murdered, he would have
died half IN hour before"
A writer says: al can pick out men In
New York-grcat men, that count millions
to their names-of whom, II you should take
away their wealth, there would bc nothing
left-you might hunt with a lighted candle,
and you would not find them to all eterni.
ty." We have no doubt Of Il.
Let all men know this and keep II 10 mind
always, that single. narrowest. simplest, du.
ty, steadily practisod day after day. does
more to support. and may do moro to enlight-
en- the soul OF the door. than course Of NOR.
al philosophy taught by Bacon. Shakespeare,
Homer, Demosthenes. and Burke.
During q musical festival at Hamburg,
musician from another city boarded In a pri.
va.e house whero an uncommonly good tablc
was kept. One day. when all tho family
were assembled for dinner. tho stranger was
abssnt. The house maid. who was sent to
call him. found him oscupicd at his toilet no
b-ing at that moment engaged in using his
tooth brush. "Well Is no coming?" said
the lady OF the house, as tho servant returned.
"Ys ma 'am, directly" was the reply, "he
is just sharpening his teeth" ..
A teacher, q young lady, put this question
to her scholars. one morning: "Who made
you!" The Oldest boy IN school could not
tell, neither could any Of the scholars, till
she questioned the smallest and the youngest
urchin In school. lie answered promptly.
The teacher turning to the largest boy, said,
"Are you not ashamed not to know what
this little fellow knows ?" "Ile 7" replied
the big 'un, "Thundsr! I should think ho
might know "taini q fortnight sineehe ,cas
made!,' -