Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1865-07-28

'Misttllameous.
Pot no faith in a new promise
based upon the breach Of an old one.
s--Dr. johnson said of widower
who was about to marry, that it vas re-
markable case of the triumph Of hope
over experience.
Dickens. in speaking Of friend.
says he was so long in the legs that he
ipokod like the afternoon shadow Of some.
BODY else.
1t is said that the high price of
eggs is owing to the fact that the hens
are at great expense to procure revenue
stamps to put on their manufactured
articles.
SHELTER Us What is tho difference
between the Prince of Whales and a
bombskell? One is heir to the throne,
the other thrown to the air The Prince
himself, on hearing this, declared it to be
simply abominablc.
1t is hard for some people to get
out of the room when their visit is real
ly over; they want to be of and you want
to have them of, but they don't know how
to manage il. One would think they had
been built in your parlor or study, and
were waiting to be launched.
Elsen. pedestrian, recently ran ten
miles in one hour and three minutes in
Quebec. The wager was that he would
make the distance inside Of the hour
As his progress was interrupted at one
point by drunken man. be will attempt
The feat again, and is confident that he
oan accomplish Il.
a distinguished California divine
was asked after a trip to silver land,
"Whst he thought Of the country ?" He
replied. There are but three things at
Washoe, sir--big mines, little mines, and
whiskey shops; in other words, Ophir
holes, gophir holes and loafer hOles.'
"A certain minister, going to visit
one of his sick Pensioners, asked him
how he had rested during the night
"Oh, wondrous i'll, SIR" replied he, ''for
mine eyes have not come together these
three nights" "What is the reason Of
that ~ said the other. "Alas '.'be-
cause my nose was betwixt them"
Sir Walter Scott tells story of
aScotch minister, who, Oh an icy winter
Sabbath, threatened his congregation
With everlasting torments in thick-ribbed
ice. Being taxed with the heretical
tendencies Of such a version, the crafty
Scot replied, 'l'd no try to scare sinners
this could weather by making EN- think
about hot fire.
Small boy, on tip.toe, to his COM
panion-"Sh-stop your noise, all of
you"
Cempanions-"Hello! Tommy! what
il the matter ~
Small boy-"We've got new baby
it's very weak and tircd-walked all the
way from heaven last night-mus,n't be
kicking up row round here now"
An exchange says this simple
mode OF keeping butter in warm weather
where ice is not handy; invert com.
mon flower pot over the butter, with
some water in the dish in which the but.
ter is laid. The orifce at the bottom
may be corked or not. The porousness
Of the oarthernware will keep the but
rer cool.
The coquettish Mrs. has
Just returned from pleasure trip to
Washington. She only took with her
forty-two dresses twenty shawls. nine
teen bonnets, and two hundred pairs Of
gloves, Surely" said friend who hap
peued to be present when she was un-
packing, "you did not take all that with
you. I merely took what was indis-
penshble, my dear. l left behind me all
taat was cumbersome" "Ah, yes, un.
derstand, Jane,-your husband"
"A doctor was summoned to cot.
tage at HARDWOOD, in England, and found
boy in need Of his services.
"Show your tongue, said the doctor.
The boy stared like an owl.
"My good boy, let me see your tongue, y
repeated the doctor.
Talk English, said the mother, and
then turning to her son, she said
"Hopen thy gobbler, and push out thy
loliker."
The mouth few open, and the doctor
was terribly "taken iu."