The Tiffin weekly tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1859-1868, 1865-10-12

lrishmau-by the by, what can be
the reason that lrishmen are the
only people that have cows TO selll
Is it because they love cows, or
hate them! Tho whole world
knows their "strong weakness for
pigs, but do they collect rare spe-
cimens OF cows out ofpurc affection
to dispose of to curiosity seekers
having good homes Or is il that
they love pigs too well to endure
the presence Of q rival, and dispos ,
of the bovine race as fast as they
obtain them I However that may
he, if you ever want COW, an
lrishman will want to sell you one;
and this particular lrishman had n
particularly fine animal--just the
thing for the occasion.
Before purchasing, made few
elementary inquiries; as to what
cows eat, how much exercise they
needed. in what manner they were
to be stabbed and how many quarts
of cats they would require daily
My friend replied, that they pre-.
TERED q warm mash, to be given
three times n day; and when he
saw from my countenance that my
mind was n blank on the subject OF
warm mashes, he explained, that
hot water was poured upon bran
and then mixed; and then, rousing
to tho subject, he went into the
habits OF cows in general; that he
thought ship stuils was an excel.
lent change OF diet; that they liked
HAY, turnipe, carrots, potato peal
ings, bred, slops of all kinds that
were not greasy; that they were
not fed oats, and required no excr.
else and no care in the stable, but
stood in the sun all day long,
winking and blinking with con-
tentment, and put themselves to
bed at night; that the one he re.
ierred to was not young, but gentle
and good mixer; and mentioned
incidentally, that he hardly knew
where | would keep her in the city,
as no COW would ever go down the
area steps and through narrow
hallway into a back yard. Now
knew nothing of bran, and meal
and ship stufls, and only listened
with an attempt at an intelligent
smile, knowing that the articles
could be purchased by name and
without explaining their nature,
but | was well aware that the yard
was the only place in which to
keep the COW, and that the road to
it was down the steps and through
the lower hall; at least ift there was
any other way to il, ! lad not yet
discovered it. So this casual OBJ
jection was quite a serious one,
and we were compelled to discuss
the feasibility of leading the animal
up the front steps, which, however
would have required her to 90
down the back ones--or hosting
her over the fence. But, as these
measures did not seem practicable.
and a COW must be had, my friend
mildly suggested, that several
lrislmcn with stoat rope might
drag her through the passage way;
and as my faith in the nature OF
COWS was illimitable, it was deter
mined to make the purchase on the
chance. AS the weight OF a COW
was to me utterly unknown, and
as the floor she was to pass over
had once given way, carpenter,
had to be called in to strengthen
it: aud he, in his enthusiasm, and
being probably as ignorant as my
self, used 80 many supports, that it
would have been strong enough to
carry un elephant. Four able
bodied men were engaged from a
neighboring stable, and provided
with q good sized rope, 80 that VIC
were fully prepared for any emer
lgency.
In order that there may be nc
mistake in the debt and credit Of
this transaction, it must be known
that the COW cost one hundred dol.
lars; that the man was to deliver
her at the front door free ofcharge
So this sum must be charged to
principal, as so much invested in
stock, whether it ever entered my
back yard or not; and the interest
on it will hereafter be one of the
current expenses, amounting, al
seven per cent to exactly seven
dollars q year.
! 1t is essential that these matters
should be watched; "look after the
pennies, and the pounds will take
care of themselves" and the point
would be, whether the cows milk
and manure would hereafter pay
seven dollars annually net profit.
The day appointed to receive my
new pet arrived, and with it the
animal; four brawny, red handed
lrishmen, strong enough to pick
her up and carry her if she resisted
were at the door; they at orce be
came excited and prepared for ac-
ton; the COW looked wild and
threatening as they closed in
around her. Her owner, who was
leading her with a cord, called out,
$500 so 90" in a deprecatory
manner that evidently produced no
effect; he, however, got her head
to the first step; when she hesitated
and began to sniff suspiciously; the
moment of action had evidently