Dodgeville chronicle. [volume] (Dodgeville, Wis.) 1862-current, 1865-12-21

kinds there is, except the harp Oh thou-
sand strings. They spres9 themselves out
about p hundred feet, when out popped
chap in white kids, with a small SUCK IN
his hand, and got upon to stool ana com
menced to thrash around. Presently one OF
the musicians footed, and then another, un
til they all got to going it, all On discoro,
not the slightest approach to harmony, no
more than there would be with lot OF
EARTHQUAKES, thundGrstorms and tornadoes
all mixed up together.
Well. the curtain at last rose, and there
stood about fifty chuckle- headed chaps, with
all sorts of fancy filings on. made OF calico,
velvet, rags, ribbons, lace and feathers.
Of course, all the little double barrelled
things were ,evelled at them. Presently
one chap, with q sort Of O jug-shaped face
and cat-fashioned eyes; turned up his nead
and gave q short howl, a sort of a cross be-
twixt the wolf and the dying wall OF stuck
Mig Soon art Their, then Two more with
immense bovine voices struck IN, ana then
they all struck in, and made night hideous
with their trashy discord. About this time
the soups left the stage (They were dressed
| in a sort Of butternut rig, and looked like
sorry lot of rebel prisoners.) They were
followed by the gewgaw crowd, with the
exception Of the cGt-eyed chap and squaliy-
looking woman. Then he commenced to
howl, and bark, and below, and crow, and
she screeched, and mewed, and purred and
| cackled; they run up towards each other ana
run back. Then came a gay looking fellow
| with letter, and we must say that he mad
/ the sweetest little face we ever saw stuck on
| q boys shoulders, and he howled very
! sweetly; we soon discovered By the things
! he walked on that he was mol boy
Well that was about all there was to this
round the curtain went down amidst
| good deal Of stamping. Alter sitting there
| another hour, the triangle sounded, the nd
dlers popped out, and the curtin went mp
! This time there was nothing on the stage
but an old squaw who seemed to be making
! soap She had large cauldron Kettle In
/ an arch underneath which bright fire was
| burning, At her feet was a skull and some
| other human looking bones, which satisfied
US that in consequ nee OF the high price OF
/ grease, she had been compelled to work up
some old lager beer fellow. The soap was
nearly dine, for she was dipping it in her
paddle, and holding it up to see If 1t would
string lust as our mother used to do); but
she soon had to leave her soap, for the fat
woman came ont, and they both went to
screeching The squaw could come the
panther to dot, and as we thought, the
/ souaw was enough for the fatwoman; soon
out came the chap that we knew was not
| boy, and made a noise that sounded some
| like singing; then he C { eyed fellow came
in, and they all went in on the screech
This round ended by the old squaws'
telling the fortune Of the cat-eyed chap and
! the fat woman.
After sitting there another tedious hour,
the triangle went off again; out popped the
! Adders, wiping their mouths as though they
| had had somel hing wet about them: up went
| the curtain, and the fat woman came run
ming down the hill. In the back ground
was o human skeleton which the fat woman
would run at and howl, and then come
back 10 the lights and cackle and gobble,
and then run at the bones again; we don t
| know how long she would have kept it up,
| if the cat-eyed fellow had not suddenly
made his appearance from behind clump
! of trees, aud commenced bawling like
newly weaned calf. Soon another fellow
made his appearance, which we took to be
the fat woman's husband by the way she hid
! her face and the fiutter she was in at being
caught with the cat-eyed chap. This new
chap commenced roaring; his voice was
decidedly bulisfroggian. After the usual
amount Of caterwauling, the cat. eyed chap
left. and the fat woman and the new man
started for home, crying as loud as they
could bawl; they had not gone far, wren
they got into row with some other chaps,
and in the muss, the woman got the vail
knocked of, so that the chap who was with
her could see who she was You ought to
have seen him double up and howl. You
would have been sure that he had the colo
and she he St. Vitus dance. The other
chaps laughed. That round ended by his
dragging the fat woman off from the stage,
wriggling and screeching.
After another hour the curtain went up,
/ and there stood the fat woman and we sup
pose, the husband; he had a dagger, and
! she evidently considered herself in bad fix
| as most females do when they are caught by
their husbands; he ran at her several times
growing like hyena, but she made so much
noise that he could not stab her, so he put
up his dagger; this round ended by some
more chaps coming in and fixing things IN
another shape, which was to killthe cat-eyed
chap instead, as appeared in the next round
When the curtain went up this time, there
was masquerade ball raging on the stage
and one of these girls that can stand on one
toe and throw the other foot higher than
her head, was going it; presently the
cat-eyed fellow and the fat woman got out
on one side, and were going in on the
screech; but they didn't go in long, for the
husband found them, and just knitted the
.cat-eyed chap. Then there was such a time
they all bawled together, and such dis
tressing noises were never heard before.
The last we saw of the cat.eyed chap, he
was lying there dead, bawling as loud as
he could scream; the curtain went down,
and the thing was over.
And now, gentle readers, permit US to say
that although we have not given you all the
details of the performance, you have the
substance and know as much about it as we
did when it was over. Friend Holborn,
who was with US, purchased book for forty
cents that threw some light on the subject.
IL seems that it was an American scene, To-
Gated in Boston and vicinity, and hat these
foreign mountebanks were giving us repre-
sentation of the New England character,
and yet we were so stupid as not to see 1t.
1t seems that some count (of course there
are plenty of counts among the Yankees,
had fallen in love with some big mans wife
and the wife got a touch of it, too-and
that she went to this old squaw to get some
thing to cure it. The old squaw recommend,
ed roots, and she was of in the woods to gel
the roots where the cat-eyed fellow happened
accidentally to find her, as is generally the
case, AMI as is too often the case for III CON-
fort of such diseased persons, the husband
accidentally made his appearance, and the
thing finally ended in the husbands admin
istering the only sure remedy in such cases.
When we came 10 learn that they had been
trying to represent an American scene, our