Daily Davenport Democrat. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1864-1874, 1865-03-06
THE DEdOCRAT.


lvson ~ b. Z. 1ssaiae rs1e1 he7
rnn rlaxfe1's 0TrLR
TIE following Mid and perfectly proper
and intslli9ib1e disections Of the foreman
Of newspaper composition r00m to one Ct
hisAands viii dive A idea OF this:
Vim. put General Bcaufcgard on the
Galley ami then Anish the murder of the
Segrn Won cunnhencsd yestefday. Bet up
I'M. ruins of Guysniotte !. Distribute the
mali -pox /: you need not linish that maitiny
mt the numps in the paper this week.
t,trh that nj into hell, and then - to the
deyii and he win tell you how To dispose Of
tho, dead mstter.'''.a.f 4fs guas31 IS
This style might be varied in very pic
Itsr,.pue msuner BY the use ~ signs q in
the following statement Of the death Of q
[printer 80 -. ss,.s.,et
George woodcock, the Of his profss-
siod, tin Typ Of hanesty the ief al and
although the s-U- Of death has put q. :"
his exrtencs, every S,of his life was with
out +es a
THE Asnous-oRTBoeRAPHlc STYLE.
This style, perhaps, has already been
oyerdpna; but possibly the Illustrations
present may give new suggestions to ex
perimenters in it, The following. which
commences aplmble," By the Autilm Of
John Browns Tract" is romantic and at.
fecting beyond anything we have lstely
seen:
.There wuz phrpg, onst In fack there
wuz sev'ral phrogs- my tail. There
wuz phrog, onst, and he wuz bro't up by
his respeckted parents cording to the
weigh in which good phrog ortcr go.
| They tort him to squeak--owe! he sqnoke
SO m,isical-they tort him to jump, and
they tort him to reflcck how he wuz only
| tadpowel onst, and hadn't orter look down
| upon them as wuz nothing but tadpowels
| yet The hoam of this youthful phrog
wuz sweet hosm, indeed. The bottom OF
the ditch in which he resided with his pa
rients wuz puffeekly lively: the wurrems
in it wuz large, and the snaiks wux remark
able small. What more could phrog de-
sire :"
The following letter was written by
young lady:
Der kuzzen We is all well, and moth
ers got the his Terrix brother Tom is got
the IIupin kaugh and sister Ann has got
babee, and hope these few lines will find
you the same. Rite sumo Your apfhec-
tionate kuzzen.
The following order gerbotim et Eterotim,
is said TO have been received by an under
! takcr from an afflicted widower:
Sur: My waif is ded, and Wants to be
boried to MORO At Wunor klok. L nose
wair to dig the Hol.--bi the side Of my
too Uthcr waifs-lst it he deep"
The recording secr tary OF division of
Sons ofTemperancc made this entry in his
book, showing a remarkable ingenuity in
spelling usual" y:
"Artcr gwine threw the yewzewal
fawms THAR wais q coleksllun takin up but
noihin pad"
In a window of beer house in one of
our large cities is this notice label Bear
Sowld Hear tuppens cwart.'"
THE LAcoNIc STYLE
As applied to cpistlcs and kilograms this
is excellent a husband tecsraphed to
his wife, ''Wha. have you for brcnkf fast,
and how is the baby The answer came,
" Buckwheat cakes and the measles
The cheapest telegram ever sent was by
an Irislman. Said he to the telegraph OPP
orator, DO you ever charge any body for
the address in Il message ~ NO" replied
the operator. And do you charge for
signing his name, srs NO sir Well,
thin, will yc please send this siry l jist
want my brother to know I'm here =
handing the following (" To John McFlinn
at New York signed Patrick Nc.
Finn" The message was sent and no
charge made
Humphreys. the boxer, after he had con-
qucred Mendoza, the jew, wrote friend
rs follows:
Dear John: I've done the Jew
Yours, L. HUMPHREYS"
Everybody has heard of the famous let |
tiers which passed between the adverse
chiefs Of sir OConnell and Tyrone
PAY me my tribute, or if you don't
O'CoSNE1I."
IL owe Won no tribute, and if did
OMEN.
After Kean's performance of Abel Drug
ger, for his own benefit. nj Drury Lane
Theatre, Mrs Garrick, with more sincerity
than politencss, wrote az follows:
bear Sir: You can't play Abel Drugger. !
Yours, s. GARIuCK."
ITO Edmund Kcan, Esq"
To this the modern Roscius laconicallv
replied
dear Madame: know it.
Yours, Z. KEAN."
ITO Mrs. Garrick."
The celebrated Foote'S correspondence
with his mother is equally pithy:
Dear sam: I'm in prison.
'" Your loving mother, A. FooTE."
Dear Mother: So ain |.
"lour ailectionate son, SAM FooTE.
THE DORSET STYLE
Dorset is a maritime county in England.
ON the Channel. \ book has been publish
ell in Boston in the Dorset dialect, by Viii
liam Barnes. the original pronunciation he
ing preserved by the spelling. Here is a
pleasant example;
FRtESps-LIkE
When wer still a bwoy. and mothers PRIDE
A bigger bwoy spoke up to kind like
:" If you DO like. Iii tn at ye wi ride
In ilieasc wieel-lsrrow here" % blind-l,ke
To what e had woykcn in his mindlike,
An mounted vor passenger inside
An coinen 10 puddle perry wide.
lie tippd me In. a grinnen back behiud-lle.
70 when man do come TO me too thick Ike.
An -heak my hand, where oonce e pass'd me by,
Ar tell me he would do me this or that,
capt help thinker o. the big bwy's trick-like,
Az then, for AL l can hut wag my hat,
An thank EN-, do vcel little shy
DIARpnGA AND DYsENTERY.--We have
exam ned great number of letters from
some of the most prominent citizens in
Cincinnati and Covington, etc. speaking Of
the highest terms of Dr. Stricklana's Anti
Cholera Mixture for the cure of diarrhGa
and dysentery. The letters are too long to
publish Mr.. Woods. of Covingtnn, says
he was pronounced incurable by the best
doctors inCincinnati, and one, bottle Of DR..
Strickland's Anti Cholera Mixture effected
permanent ciee after suffering for months
with the worst form Of diarrh9a and dys-
EMERY so cts bottle. For sale by oil
Druggists.
DYSPEPSIA, NERVOUSNESS AND DEBILrry.-
DR.. .StricxianIs Tonic can recon
mend those suffering with Loss Of Ape