Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1865-12-08
TIM BUNKER ON KEEPING Il WIFE
CO8EFORTABLE.

time. "Its tn bad to keep three meI
waitin' an hour for their grub
You've got to wait till the brush is
cooked, with which to cook your dinner,
said Aunt Polly, snappishly. None but
a greenhorn would furnish green wood
for his wife to cook with-and green
brush at that. You know, Jake Frink
that you have never had a second cord Of
wood at your door any time since I have
lived with you, and that is going on seven
and thirty years. All that time green
brush has been the chief article of kind
| ling. One might think that your whole
farm was brush pasture teetotally. /
should like to have you try cooking with
green wood little while, and see how
/ you would like it. 2"
Wal, Polly, hurry up, any way said
Jake, for We are all mighty hungry, and
| the corn wants hoeing badly. You see
brush is economical, and what [ can't
sell at the store, can use at home It
would kind o rot on the ground eff /
didn't burn it up.
Pretty economy it is to keep your wife
in stew all the while, and hired mel
waiting hours every day, because green
wood won't burn. 1t is smoke, siss and
fzzle from morning to night, and l no
sooner get blaze agoing, than have to
put on more green wood, and then there
is another sputter. | never seen such a
house IS this is in my life" :" said Aunt
Polly, with great emphasis, and with a
face as red as beet
Jake is a great sinner, although
he thinks he is so good that he
does not need to go to meeting and hear
Mr.. Spooner preach. He would try the
temper of much more sanity woman
than Aunt Polly, and keep her on the
rack. He might just as we'll put red pep
per in her eyes, as to keep her kitchen
always smoked up with green brush
Her eyes always look red, and it is moth
ing under the sun but that smoky kitchen.
The draft of the chimney is none of the
best, but that would be remedied with
well seasoned wood. Now you see that
man had christian marriage, but he
don't care no more for his wife than for a
dumb animal guess he would lift a
sheep out of the ditch, especially In these
times, when wool is dollar pound
But he keeps his wife in ditch about all
the while, and never suspects that she is
bit uncomfortable. He thinks he saves
something by burning brush, but it don t
pay unless you have machine to chop it
up fine, and keep it under cover until it
gets dry. To work it up with the axe
into fuel for stove, it costs more than it
is worth. If it lies on the ground in the
MANURE
without any expense. Then if you have
it, or any other green wood, there is a
matter of uncertainty about meals, which
throws the whole work of the farm into
confusion, and puts everybody out of
humor.
But this is only one way in which a
wife is kept uncomfortable. It does seem
as if some men took less care of their
wives than of the dumb cattle in their
fields. IF the rooms in their houses had
been thrown together by chance, they
csuld not have been more inconvenient
A good arrangement of the rooms saves
one-half the labor. Sometimes the sleep
ing room is on the second floor, and there
is many a journey up and down stairs
during the day, for woman already over
burdened with care Sometimes the
store-room is in the garret, and other
journeys have to be made daily, for sup
plies for the table Everything that she
needs for her work should be upon the
first floor, and close at hand There is
no unnecessary waste of strength then in
filling her place as housekeeper, cook,
dairy maid. laundress, wife and mother,
for many farmers wife is expected to
fill all these Offices, and to be always
cheerful and happy, waiting for the com
ing of her liege lord, as if she had moth
ing else to do but to be wife.
The lot of farmers wife, as it gener-
ally runs, is rather hard one, and iG
made hard very often from the want
Of attention to little things If a man
needs twenty cords of wood for the year,
it costs no more to get it in the winter, in
time of leisure, and so have it chopped,
split and packed under cover, than to get
it load at time, and to have the tor
ment of a slow fire all the while. This
,1.y, l. 1ol -
and worries, which is good deal worse
than work. Dry wood is one of the Sc
crets of comfortable wife. That is what
makes Mrs. Bunker so hale and hand
some, past sixty. She says she wouldn't
know how to keep house without dry
wood, [ guess she wouldn't, for she has
never had anything else.
Deacon Smith is a good man, and means
we'll, but he does not know how to use a
wife. His well has hard water, that won't
wash, and all the water on washing day
has to be brought from the brook, more
than forty rods from the house. To be
sure he keeps a servant, but it makes a
world of work for servant and house
keeper. He might have a cistern that
wouldn't cost over twenty dollars, and
it would save more than that value of
labor every year. He has roofing enough
to keep it supplied with water all the
while. And then the deacon carries on
large farm, and keeps half dozen hired
men, and boards and lodges them all in
his own house. Now what burden this
brings upon a woman, when they might
be much better accommodated in small
farm houses of their own. 1t is quite as
easy to hire part of the labor needed on
farm from those married. as from those
who have no homes of their own. This
leaves farmers wife with no family but
her own to attend to, which is much more
pleasant.
Then l guess a man has to do something
to himself as well as to his house,
to make everything go smooth with his
wife. She bargained for man when she
got married, and she has a right to be
disappointed if she finds she has nothing
but working animal, always jaded and
unfit for social life. [ know of some
farmers who rarely go anywhere but to
meeting and market. They feel that they
cannot afford the time to dress up and 20
and see their friends, and dine, or take
cup of tea. They have SO slid out of So
ciety that their friends rarely come to see
them. They are so hurried with work that
they do not make friends very welcome.
They seem to have no appreciation of
life, but as an opportunity to make mon
ey They prize work for this end, and
time that isn't turned into money is lost
to them. Their muscles not only become
hard, but their hearts grow hard and un-
sympathizing. They lose their taste for