The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1865-08-05
VARIETY.

In China, II man il not married by twenty he
!. drummed out Of the town.
Jolly old friend Of says that If it were not
for the dear women, would be but stag nation
1t is found that women make the very best clerks
for the electric telegraph. The only dthcnity IS 10
prevent each young lady n; either end OF the line
from having the last word.
II - temper which makes the bliss of home, or
disturbs It's comfort The home is in the forbearing
nature IN the yielding spirit, IN the calm pleasures
of mild disposition, anxious to give and receive
happiness.
Envy is the most inexcusable of all passions.
Every other sin has some pleasure annexed TO IT, or
will admit Of excuse; envy alone wants botn.
Other sins last but for while-hatred has an end;
but envy never ceases
Do all in your power to teach your children self
government II a child is passionate teach him by
patient anl gentle means to curb his temper IL he
= greedy cultivate lberalty to him. X he IL sell
fish, promote generosity
Mother said little fellow the other day, is
there any harm in breaking egg sheils?" Ger
tainIv not nv dear but why do you ask -
'''Csuse dropped the basket Just now ana see what
n mess | am IN With the yelk5
A youngster while perusug chapter of Genesis
turning 10 his mother inquired whether the people IN
those days used 70 do the on the ground
IL acsonuei for mis- question by reading the passage
Aud the sons Of multiplied upon the face of
the ssrth-"
An Irisbman. fishing in the rain. was observed
carefully keeping his line under the nreh OF the
bridge
Ugon being asked the reason he replied n, follows;
Sure an won't the fish be CrOWiIzg here to
keep out Of the wet. ye spslPeen -
HAD HIM TnrRE.-A friend Of ours. who is
clerk in = New York mercantile establishment. re-
Ia,es . colDduy from which sprighty youth In the
same store cane out second best poor boy came
along vith his machine. inqulrIug-
ANY knives scissors 70 grind ::
.. DsI-t tAiuk VIC have replied the young gen
reuap fqsa;iolsly; - but can't you sharpen wits
Yes. If YOU Sc got any," was the prompt retort
leaving the uterrCgatOr rather at loss to produce
Jhe article
Miss Manage ran across the street the other day 10
see her neighbor Miss Report, to tell that her g'r
Miss Chance. ,oll her that Miss Adventure heard
Rl.s Advice say shat Miss Interpret and Miss Caicu-
late had seen Miss An lhroPy and that she sAld
ME- Han had sent word to Miss Construction that
she haI lust called Miss Fortune and that she had
inst been in formed by Mss Guide that Miss RUE :
rirl believed that Miss Lead had been up to see Miss
Apuly and that she thought Miss Conduct told MISS
Cbief that she had seen "a lady that said MISS lake
insisted that Miss Trust had intmated to MISS Ian
that Miss Like protested she did not fancy Miss
Tastes new bonnet one bit
Domestic PEH PLE-xITIEs-A Ton s-E ATHER' DICK s
SoV C,-s-I got acquainted with 8 young WIDOW,
vbc lived with her step0aughter IN the same mousse
married the widow; my father fell, shortly after II,
in love with the step-daugher OF my wife, and mar
r!ed her. Ny wife became the m0ther-in-laW ana "a
also :he daugh Law Of my own father; my Wle
step-daughter my step-mother, and am the s'eP-
father of my moiher-in-law. Wy step motner' "hO
the SON OF my father and Of my steP-Inotner; bu'
because ne is the Of MY wiies step-dsughter Sc
i nv wife the grandmother of the little boy, ana
am The grandfather q my step-brotheT- My VIE
has also boy; nv step mother is consequently thf
step sister Of my boy, aud is also his grandmother
ta6.use he Is the child Of her steP-son; and my
father Is the brother-iu-law OF my son. because nj
has got his stcD-sisier 70 wife am the brother
Of nv own SON no Is the son OF my step motner
nm the brother-u-aw Of my mother, my vile Is IN
aunt of her son, my son Is the graDdson oI III
father, and am my own grandfather
Mas PARrixGToS Is A PERFCiE SToBE-'' Can
wit upon vou madame - said Mr.. Gushing politeiy
a. Mrs Psrtingtou stood looking at the stored sweet
AZ 1i2 Washington street
Were l younger" said she, smlhng as sHee'.
"a Cyntheres upon pomade bottle - meh' Ice
fattercl by such otter. | 10 IKE poh'enes-
though il l. rarely with It; the other ng
went up 70 the opera, snd stood an hour oots'is
AMI nobody had the good manners 10 offer me seat
Due sympathy was expressed, when she Went o
ike vheebaUToT.
Il declare it must seem TO you rs II you Wer
breatbIny the airs of Paradox CeylOn's Isle, o
some such fragrant thing all the time. Have 20
any Of the odor II sanctty, that you could give me
little 10 put on nv handkerchef?'
She was assured that they had none tap, bu
expected some, with a fresh supply Of ths essenc
with which the ghost Of Hamlet scents the mornin
air, and would remember heF she thanKei thei
kindly continuing her inspection, while Ike amuse
himself by shaking up Of the bottles and seeln
he bubbles rise 30 th- surtacs-Soi. hre- ""''fO