The Xenia sentinel. [volume] (Xenia [Ohio]) 1863-186?, 1865-01-13
The Great Saratoga Trunk.

Old Anthracits has very dear Wifo-sO
dear that she costs him on her own private
account about SIS, 700 year. Mr.. Anthra-
cite always has the latest fashions, so when
the great Saratoga trunk Was exhibited in
Broadway, Mrs. A. instantly purchased one
for her summer trip.
Every one knows that the great Saratoga
trunk is an InexceptiOnal trunk. It is colos-
sal-Of Titantie proportions. CheOps, the
builder Of the great pyramid might have
found ample accommodation for her entire
household in the great Saratoga trunk.
Accordingly, down went Mrs. A. to the wa
tsring place with her great trunk. She had
not been long there, however, when old An
thacite received . private telegraph from a
friend informing him that Mrs. A. was firt-
ing desperately with young Belzebub, son and
heir Of old BelEebub, the great soap boiler.
Anthracite instantly takes the train, arriving
at the hotel and enquiring the number Of his
WifeS room, quietly walked up stairs. His
Wifes door is shut Anthracite Knocks
Door opens after some delay. Mrs. A. hut-
tered, which futter increases to diEmay when
she sees her husband Husband enters cool
ly, explains that he just came to see how she
was getting on, and seated himself on the
Saratoga trunk. Drops glove, the picking
Up Of which enabled him to look Unker the
bed. No one there. Mrs. A. looked as though
some one ought to be there. Husband talks
Of the weather, AID the pair are sitting to
little light conversation, when old Anthra-
cite remarks quietly:
MRS. A, there's q rat in your trunk"
Mrs. A. turns pale through her paint. No:
husband is mistaken. The rat is in the vain
scott. Husband is sure it is in the trunk
He smells him; he will examine. Mrs. A.
very anxious he should not. He can't The
trunk is shut, and she has lost the key. Hus-
band begs to contradict The key was in the
leck-the lid was open.
Husband, amid the protestationB Of Mrs. A.,
half raised the lid. No crincliue, no shaWls,
no lace, no furbeloWs in the great Saratoga
trunk; only young BelEebubs glossy eurls
and killing mustachs are visible-MrS. A. in
s,4ntly faints. It's the privilege of her sex
on such occasions W hat does the husband
do? Shoot y,.g Belzsbub Not bitof it.
He smiles grimly and shuts the lid down
again, locking the great Saratoga trunk. He
rigns the bell tells the waiter to bring him
gimlet. BoreH few holes through the great
flduk. Orders up the porter, and goes to
.SeW York accompanied by the great Sarato-
GA trunk. What would not the truRk have
given for cigar in baggage wagon, when
it smelled the tobacco smoke that was so lib
orally pufFed aboutl The trunk, although
nearly 81 eqted. thought best to keep quiet.
Arriving at New York, old Anthracite told
the people at the depc loud enough for the
great Saratoga trunk to hear him, that he
would leave his baggage at the office for few
days, when he would send for it. This was
more than the great trunk could bear, 50 he
kicked, shouted, and made = noise until it
was broken open, and to the amazement of
everybody, poor Belzebub crawled ont in
limping condition. He tried TO tell the peO-
pie that twas done for bet, but somehow,
the truth leaked out, and predict that there
will be fewer great Saratoga trunks at the
Springs Rext summer. think old Anthra-
cite got the best of it, don't you?