The weekly pioneer and Democrat., 1865-09-29
Artenlas Wards Autobio rsphy.

Artemas Wafo.s Auttopao IuItNsi
sd4 ;bs,Ga By Hi.self. gssSIa
cd NEw Yosk NEAR FurH Avzsoo HGza. / .
-9DR. 7sIaAYrs, into which yon 4 ssk nas IS
sena you sum leading incidents efnv lifsso'
Soos Sss San ~ ssy sS n1eus tS5 Sc cSs
onto nay life, grammattyca jerkedand proc,
erly punctooatad, would be . addition TO the
chaos Meratoor ofthe day. S4luA1 ~ ssls-sv ~
Tothe youth Of Ameiiky il wosld D nlyL
able as shownshow high pinykle 81 Tine he
can reach who commences hiS careor Nth o,
he rubbed It of while scratchin hiseelf agin
the centre pole caasin; In BahWn4 n. u, D
discriminating mob TO say hunbusS wouM not
go down ID them village The or resumcd ag-
ncultural pursoots shortly afterWard
.LnGxtstTied my hand stI giving, hln6-nens
concerts, appearing e the poor blind man my
self Bat the infamous Gus Who sF Aired to.
freely Of q spurious Ticker .unBeknoN1 to me
onedhy, and while under them in4o1auce be
led me into the canal. had 10 either teu the
green bandage from myseyes or be dFoWnded,
+ thot I'd restoremy eyeeighkJ d gs
= In wyitin about these things, Mr. Editer.,
kiner smooth 'em over Speak e iem Is ec-i
centriHities Of gen'tis. ,spra q Fl Esss
vVAAtAAA
hadn't tried to do too much. Ieptup aseries.
ofWax figgers, and among others that cf So.
crates Il thot wax fggar of Old Sock W0uld
be poplar with eddycated peple, but unforfi-
nifty put Brown linen dHster anA b II. 81
army regulation cap upon him, which peple,
with classical eddycati0ns said It Wse 3 farce-
This ntrprize Nns unfnrtnnit n other re-'
'f' fAt csfssaain tom / advertised Z var skser,
of the Hnn'ble A. Fiziins who wssi fsiE
parts But it appearea ! Had siiowH the same
fgger for Pirnt named Gibbs In that town,
the previs season, which created an Immense
TO me-" q other stOtements Of the saEn6 airalzs
larness. i tried to molHfy em. told tbaiE
that any family possessin children nAght n We
my she tiger to play with half daY, *
wouldn't charge iem o cent, but alas xas
of no avail was forced TO leavty and f;Zer.
from an article in the Advertiser Of that to3sn,
has silvered- this mans he'd with its fFosts. he
still brazenly wallows in infamy. Still are his
snakes sound and his wax works unreliable.
We are glad that he has concluded to never;
visit our town, although, incredible as 1t may
appear, the fellow really did contemplate so
doing last sumner; when, still true to the
craven instincts of his black heart, he wrote
the hireling knaves, at the obscure journal
across the street to know what they would
charge for four hundred small bills, to be done
on yellow paper! We shall recnr to this mat
ter again" n'Jt. 'at a, sHa
say, infer from, this article that pre-.
judice still exists agin me in that town.
will not speak of my once being in strait
endevorin to accumulate welth by lettin myself
to Sabbath school picnics, to sing ballads
adapted to the understandin of little children,
accompanying myself on o clarionet-which
forgot when I was one day singin instead of
20. how pleasant to be alittle child" ~
"a Rip, snap-set em up again, Ge,
Bite in the middle of three cent pie,
which mistake, added to the fact that couldn't
play on the clarionet, making It howl dismal,
broke up the picnic, and children said, IN
voices, checked with sobs and emot ions,
where was their homes and where was their
Pai s.a ekar - i
| say I will not speak this. Letit be Ber-
rid into Oblfvyon.t .sE "a
In your article, Nm. Editor, please, tell 'em
what sort of man ana. N"'s--pSs' ~ =
IF you see ft to kYitieise my Show, speak
your mind freely. I do not object TO criticism.
Tell the public, in candid and graceful arti-
che, that my show abounds in moral and start
LIN curiosities, any one of whom is worth deu-
bic the price Of admission. t-Ae 'sl-~
hav thus far spoke of myself exclusively
as exhibitor. -,
I was born in the State OF Maine. AS an in.
FAINT attracted agreat deal of attention. The
nabers would stand over my cradle for hours
and say, How bright that little face looks =
How much ii nose!" The young ladies would
carry me around In their arms. saying / was
Tnnz2ers bezay darlin, and a sweet 'eety little
ting. It was nice, tho I want old enuff to
properly appreciate it. I'm healthy old dar-
1 hav al,ess sustained moral character.
was never railroad conductor in all my
Altho' in early life did not invariably CON.
fine myself toS truth in my small bills, I hav
been gradooally growing respectabler and re.
spectabler every year. I'm not member of
any meetin house, but bleaye In meetin houses
-and shouldn't feel safe to take q dose of lau-
danum and lay down In the streets Of q village
that hadn't any with . q, ,oe0 bill In my vest
: Ny temperameutl 10 billions, aItho' don't
owe dollar in the-worh. 4s {e.;f,,1s, 80
= am an early riser, my wife Is . Presbyteri-
an may add I'm also bald. beaded. keep
i live in Baldinsville. Indiany. Ny next door,
naber is old Steve Billings. IN tell you lit
tle story about Old Steve that WI! make you
farf He jined the church last spring, and the
minister said, "You must 60 home now,
Brother Billings and erect . family altar In
your house, whereupon The eggreis old as
went home and built reg1ar Pulpit in bis sit
tin room He bad iiners il bis house four daysl
lam (56) years of age; Time with its re
ientless scyfhe is very busy. The old sexton
gathers them in.s keep pig this year 80
don't think of more, Mr.. Edter. 49, -;
Tyou should give my portrait IN connection
with my Bogfy, please have me engraved ia
laneuiehin aftifood, leaning on q uaarble riIIar.
leaying my back hair a. it b now - -
soleD5 .s9d Yours truly, 81 81.
80 ~ AKTEMAs WARD.
General Thomas recently sent . detach-
ment into Alabama, in search Of stray Govern
ment cattle. It came in conflict with sheriff
and bis posse, claiming to act under orders
from Governor Parsons; one soldier was KIN
ed and nineteen civilians were captured The
matter is 10 be investigated.