Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1865-11-14
MisceIla neous.

SOUTHERN CASptDAEBs CARD.-Tee following
announcement of a candidate was found posted on
a.tree by the roadside, and brought to the editor
of the jackson MssIssiFRiGn, who gave it gratui-
tous publication:
attention SOrereEgas!-Af3ow me, through this
medium to introduce nTsslf to your acqualu lance
q candidate fog. assessor of Taxes of Kinds
county. If any one s:sOuld be so inquisitve as to
ask why man Of my gigSuiC intellect should fly
SO low, my answer is-this--ghe Feds in May, 1864
deprived me of my left wing therefore vaulting
ambition must stoop Her Sight TO level with my
Capability. Again, should any wish to know
why do cot have priute3sbis, wouId civiily re.
ply that my pocket boeS- would laugh for a week
Mt the rustic of green back, and would never sur
vive the faintest cIiuSot metallic currency. Iwould
like very much to call onthe dear people, aud talk
to them face to face, b1t 20 effect this, my little
school would have to- close, and with it my bread
aud butter.
''Under these Circumstances I hope to be ex-
cusable'
with high regards Fam yours to command.
VI. B. HUGHEs.'
TBE CREDIT s7sTxs:-49 beautiful girl stepped
into a shop to buy pair of mitts.
allow much they ~
"why,'' said the galhut but impudent clerk,
lost in gazing upon Ee7 sparkling eyes and ruby
''Ag.eed," said the young lady pocketing the
mit,s, while her eyes spoke daggers, and as see
you give credit here, charge it your books, and
collect it the best way YOU CAM" So saying she
CA certain minister gong to visit one of his
Pensioners, asked him how be had re ned during
the night. 40, wondrous III sir" replied he 'sfor
mine eyes have not come together for these three
nights" What Is the reason of that, said the
other. Alas sir, said he, because my nose was be-
twixt them,
o. Lord: M, With no. very large portion of
Wit or wisdom, had TeEy exalted opinion of his
own powers. When once IN . large COMPANY and
expatiAting about himself he made the following
tod 60
thing, always burst OUT q laughing Il envy
you your happiness them my lord, for you must
certainly live the mer-est Life Of any man in Eng
land
So~A farmer Wrotsa9s follows to distinguished
scientific agricuturist, to- whom he eIt under obli-
cations for introducing q variety of swfne:-Re>
spected Sir went yesterday TO the cattle show
bfound several pigs of yous species. There were a
great variety of hogs and. was astenished at not
seeing you there.
IL SIR said po8peu5 parsonage who under
took TO bully an editor, do you know take your
paper I've no doubt Jou do take it, for several
Of my koFest subscribers have been complaining
lately aoout their papers being missing in the morn
ing replied the man Of the guil.
CO. Here's your money, dolt, and now Tell me
why your rascally master wrote me eighteen letters
about that cOntemptibls' sum I'm sure cannot
TELL but II yo2 excuse ne sir, guess it be-
cause seventeen didn' :, fetch it,
CA man passing taroUgh gateway in the dark.
hit bis nose against thepog+- wish that post was
IN Ill.," said he % Better wish it somewhere
else. said bystauder :" you might run against it
again -
CA Western paper says,-'sA COW was struck
BY lightning and instantly killed, bsongiug to the
village physician, who bad beautiful calf four
days old"
o." Mother,' exclaimed little poet of four
years, 90 listen to the wind making music tor the
leaves to danaa By
od-Au old bachelors definition of love;-A little
signing little crying, a Little dying, and great
deal Of lying.