, 1865-12-26

auoe!y- 40 tul6 her ansWef NBs thai she VA
loneIy.vesY lonely. and a1waYs erpecsed tc
bad haPpy homes Of thelr own, and she would
not ask them 10 aharr her saddor one. She
did, indeed 1nfosxn them, that her family rer
sliced IN New York. but that Was a large city,
and without the particular street and numbet
81 the residence it would be difficult for The
interested ones TO ascert ain their social status
oT my PARTICULARS Of tho young Widows pfc.
So, by degrees, Tho Widow DaNaet began
to be "ta1ked nbout:" Any one who eror
has lived in EuaRu community knows At
once what ogtrae1sm then followed. The H.
dies did not like her the gentlemen liked
her too much. For some Of the men, and
among them the minister, had heard enough
10 blau1e the.otlcr sex for thei7 malicious and
never, TO their knowledge, slnned In the
smallest degree rgninst propriety. Among
those who defended her the most warmly.
was. Lawyer Green, the father Of
Wills, q ken lawyer and "lcading''
utn, but ono not particularly respected,
aod whose prise Of a woman would not add
to her glory. The less oflcn lis wlie called,
The more often he came, for my mother was
beautiful and lficudless but, she soon polite
IL refused to receire him, and, then he, too,
Joined In the belief that there was matter
for wise people 10 shake their heads over.
He told TINT on the occasion Of onA OF his
visits to the city, he had called on Mrs. Bal
laert, and offered to convey any pockage or
message which she might wish delivered TO
her friends In New Yofk, when she had de-
clined sending any, saying that she had regu-
Lar communication With them by mail, and
did not need to avail herself OF the peoHcred
kindness. All this was extremely suspicious.
Gradually she was dropped" No one
visited her but the old minister, and, once or
RI Ia r rf-Ar
mother did not appear to feel the slight. She
kept quietly TO her way Of living, growing
little paler and little psoulcf every year.
When business called her into the street, men
sometime made coarse remarks, aftcr she had
passed, Of admiEntiou or suspicion but not
one Of fhrm, the yniDest bravo Of them all,
Nould have venturcd to address her In other
than the most respectful terms.
The yeats g1'dcd By grow apace; EotWo
kept our pretty flower garden In order in the
summer, uud In the winter my mother scwcd
and painted flower pieces or miniatures,
teaehtng rue, in the meantime. Occasionally
she sent OF case Of these paintings to New
York By express, receiving ii return z aconsfd-
eTae1e remittance OF money; !a this way,
3oyed, Was purchased. In this wny cane our
books, paints, canvas, our Christmas feast,
my mothers new stawla and best dresses,
and, when ! was old enonghto go to the Sem
regular Income, from whatever source 1t was
drawn, WIS Just eufiicient to cover the plain,
ordinary expenses af the household.
Thus grew up, loving my mother with a1l
the passion Of a strong nature which had
nothing else to lore. And believe that In
my love she was tolerahly happy. Whateger
wrong she bad endured from oilers, her child
found occupation III the cultivation Of his
tastes and Intellect. We were happy-somc-
times deeply 50 hut there was shadoW orer
cur home, as thele always Is where there Is
doubt and mystery, and In that shadow I
grew up: twas to be expected that should
be tinld, proud, shrinking defiant, happy
sometimes rcpented the manner of my bring
In. up, when she saw its effect upon the
mingled scIsltlyencss and enthusiasm Of my
temperament and 1t doubtless was in the Gu
dcayor to correct This error that She insisted
upon my continuing at the Seminary; when
often and often wonld come home and. Ii
tears and anger, beg her to take me from
the school.
You must learn, bctlmes, to take the
world Us It L, my boy" WAS her argument,
even when tears were in her eyes at The reci.
tai OF my suflc1ings. You can now ecc that
much more Was meant by little Grnce than
the common patronage Of q richer child,
when che offered me her sympathy aud fsieud-
ship, and declared the estimation in which
she held my mother.
The day after my rash adventure with the
chalk outline, went 10 school as il nothing
lad happened, but still cherished the Intel1-
tiou OF Furnishing Willis Green for his impcr-
tincnce. ne was careful to give me no OPP
portunity. Day after day, week atler week
Slipped By. Tic scholars forgot to lauch at
that unfortunate kiss. Evelyn neyer spoke
to me after It; before, she had occas5onal}y
honorcd me with d bow or passing
word. Yet tho more She eeorned and neg.
lected nc, the more infatuated / became.
could not restrain my eyes from watching
hcr, c1en during study hours. The whole
school knew Of my passion, md amused
themselves with It. I admire cycn that
schoolgirl hautcaur which led her TO put on
such airs Of coldress toward me and many
others. Thought she had @ right to be Proud
and particular she could not hold herself
400 precious Ny secret, burning ambition,
wss, some day to make myself worthy Of her.
In my own room, had q great canvas, lite
size, upon which spent hours each day Of
those long summer afternoons. Not evca nv
mother knew who was The snbject Of this an
bitious attempt; I think she believed that I
was painting her picture; shc did not dream
that my love was already divided. 1 vas
making another portrait oi Evelyn Ward.