The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1865-09-13
a QUESTION An ANswER.


EH-. -SSSa-------- - go.
QUESTION AND ANSWER.
Very Plain Advice 10 an InauirInR
Female--'A Standard for First-CIRs,,
WOmnnhOOd.
In NoGh'S Times and MESSENGER for
this week, we find the following ones
tion and answer.
QUESTION: Another old subscriber.
and also victim of circumstances
would very respectfully solicit your
advice. was married several Years
ago TO an excellent man, and he hns
proved himself all that good husband
should be-nlways faithful, ever kind,
and very induIgent TO my faults. i
may say, with a certainty of feeling,
that his heart doth safely trust iii me,
We have enjoyed great deal of do
mestic happiness-l might call 1t unin-
terrupted.until about "A year ago WINS
introduced 10 a very nice Young man.
of good standing, who paid me many
hnttering attentions, $50 dear, YOU
know, to the vanity of poor weak femi-
nine nnture,) and he seemed nothing
10th to become a victim to my fascina2
tons. OF course lie knew from the
first that was married woman, and
could be of no grent benefit to him in
the end, as could not marry him. He
must have been a tspooney' of the first
water To fall in love with me. but YOU
know u woman with bit of coguette
IN her nature, will do many things in
hulf n minute that in all her afteF life
she will regret. That being the case
with your humble correspondent, SHE
SolicitS your advice and consideration
as to her future life. Being an shonest
and conscientious, also high-minded
woman, feel rather 'sheepish' to re-
celVe much trust and affection from my
husband. But don't know whether
10 keep running afler 'spOoney, or TO
tell my husband all about him, and lei
him kick him out, or to deceive my
husband To the end Of the chapter, ir
you viii be so good as to advise me in
this dilemma, you will confer lasting
favor"
EDITORS ANSwER.-If You were in
earnest and really needed advice, we
should chide you for your levity of
conduct, and tell yOu to bid your lover
begone; but, madam, you Jest, though
jesting Oh such subjects Is somewhat
lndelicnte. "Ihe woman who deliber-
ateS is lost" says the poetic proverb:
which is true in one sense, (because n
truly Yirtuous woman cannot hesitate
for an instant nS to the course she sIluIIId
pursue when her honor is I'm nucstion \
but it is only and partially true in an
other, since even:L weak woman, though
tempted TO Vucillata in opinion may
still be led by her nobler Instincts 10
ultimately choose the right path, The
married woman, however, who cnn CO.
quet with any man but her husband.
(t0r coquetry is not tdearn to NIL Jyo-
men, though you say we "lSnowI' il to
De SOL or who can encourage the ca
resSes of any man except her husband
is not virtuOus in her heart, whatever
she may be in her conduct. 1t is n com
mon thing, we admit, for married Jvo-
men to aver that she who does not love
n flrtation IS nOTenl woman is n Ltmill,-
sop" &c.i but the welded lady who
uses such language is sadly lacking in
pflnclple, and 1--WE mnst be parCloned
for speaking plainly, but honest NOR
ality demands it, if. she acts upon the
doctrine she promulgates, she is ONLY
pure pure because she has never yet felt the
passion that carries AWAY sri many
down to the gates of death,'i or has
never yet met and been sufficiently
tempted by the man who could awaken
that potential proclivity. We saw to
you IN all seriousness, land we saw it
solemnly, in the hope that it NAV do
some waVering woman good, though
we are aware that. your whole comniTl-
nieatlon IS one of 6dLlimdge,) the mar
ried women who will 1lirt will do worse
and II she never does worse her
friends may attribute It more to her
good luck than to her good dis
cernment. Believe us when we
say that no more fatal error exists in
society than the liberation with which
such n loose sentiment as that of
II married wOman's right to indulge in
a Irritation IS listened to, and that one
pold, gay, daShing woman, who. with
charming audacity, utters such a senti-
ment, is just as certain to corrupt all of
her sex With whom she associates, as
one rotten apPle.is certain to reduce, in
time, the whole barrel to n similar con-
ditiOn. II is true that men ought to be
as pure as women. Perhaps they are
and perhaps they are not; but whether
or not, The world makes great Clistinc-
ton between the lapse of virtue in n
man and the lapse of virtue in a womqn.
and 1t Is. our duty in addressing live men
and Women to argue of things ms they
are, and not AS they ought to be-to
treat facts as facts in the social system.
and not deal in sublime but imDractic.
able distractions. This will account.
madam, for the tone of our advice given
last Sundpy- to a victim of circum-
stances" and also for that of the homilv
we read TO you on the present occasion.
II they seem to differ in their views of
morality, it Is not because we think a
criminal passion IL more venial thing in
one sex than in the other, but because
society so regards it; it is not because
we think man may consCientiouslv
bestow his affections upon a woman
other than his Wife any more than n
wife may innocently bestow hers upon
the man who is not her husband, but
because, society utterly casts out as
abandoned the women Who so e,rra and
merely murmurs, ''Fie litfieI Won iOupht
to be ashamed of yourself Ito the errinu
gentleman. That's the whole story, and
you are evidently quite as familiar with
IL rs ourselves. How few in this world
nre ready TO say with our Saviour: "Go
and sin no MORE" to a fallen woman ?
How few women, in good position, Will
Kindly take her by the hand, though
ready at any mOmenttOt tap on the cheek
with a fan II man jGlst as guilty and saw
in the most winning tones: TYoE
naughty, naughty wretch BY the wny.
mint engaged to dance the next sci
with you, you wicked, wicked fellow PII
Now this confessed, your lest has more
wit than wisdom, and our advice. we
trust, more common sense thnn theo-
retic perfectiOn. sl1l li1-t isi'l
AFtemuA Rardi's lNIi1obiogranI,Y. nv
HIMSELF :
NEW YoRK, NEAR FIFTH AyENoo
HOTEL, Org, 3lct.-Dr. Sir. Yrs, into
which you ask, me to send yoIi sum
leadln incidents in myiliIe SO you. can
write my Bogfry for the papers. eum
dooly 10 hand. have no doubt that a
article onto my life, grammcttycnlIy
lerked and properly punctooated Would
pc addition to the chois Iiteratoor Of
To the youth OF AnerilSy Il. vvould he
YalIyble us showin how high a pinnylzle
OF tnme man can reach who commenst
his career with a small canvass tent and
pel-Ereen OK, which he rubbed it of