Evansville daily journal. (Evansville, Ind.) 1863-1866, 1865-11-08


II man cant argue without swear
ing, his discussions are too cursery.
A shrewd little fellow, who had Just
began to read Latin, estonishsd the
master By the following translations:
"Vir mar; gin atrap--Virgin, man
trap" 80 80
A prisoner in the penitentiary recent
~ offered 10 play seven up with another
prisoner like himself, heavily ironed, 90
decide who should wear both pair Of
shackles. Coot cues, bel
"Pspa," said Mr.. Browns youngest
son, can't ! 20 to the eiscns2' !" No,
my boy" -aHectionately replied Mr.
Brown; "f you are 9 good boy, | viii
take you ont 10 see your grandmothsrs
grave this aftsrHoop." Fn 100
None Of our readers need DO troubled
with corns on their feet, IL what follows
is true. Try II:
A piece Of bread soaked In vinegar
and applied foa corn on the foot, on GO
ing to bed at night, and banded with 70
piece Of oil cloth, will remove the corn
In two or three applications. Ts
Working for bare life" is DOW de-
fined to be making cloth for a new baby.
The boys IN blue, with amputAted
limbs, make the most effective stump
speeches.
A pretty little Parkersburg, Vs., ~o-
man 10 under arrest for marrying four
military officers
Don't mind an ulcer in the side; Il 10
only side issue.
The Cleveland PlatndeaIer says: @To
find out what's up, inquire the price Of
butter, eggs and meat. That's what's
up"
A young lady burst into tears" the
other day, but has been put together
again, aud 10 now weAriHg hoops 10 pre-
vent recurrence Of the accident
Arsemus Ward says bic hair resem-
bles lovers on tbs sve Of separation; II 10
hard TO part.
To kill acts, bit your unole's wife on
the head with . hammer.
Beautiful young girls and good cork
screws are very insinuating.
Many writer's have all quantity Of
sheei.Iightning which they never can
condense in thundeFboh.
A man passing through gateway In
tbe dark, bit bis nose against the post
81 wish that post was in hill" said be.
Better wish IL somewhere else said
bysiander, ''you might run against II
againl"
Nothing teaches patience like gar
den. You may 20 round and watch the
opening bud from day 10 day but il
takes its time, ard you cannot urge II
on faster than II will All the best re-
suits Of garden, like those OF life, are
slowly but regularly progressive.
A woman in Ayr, found, 10 the centre
of a potato gold ring, which the am-
bilious tuber must have enclosed in the
progress Of growth
Paris with population Of 1896, l4l,
possesses more than fifty thousand acres
Of open ground, planted with more than
one million trees.
The patient housewife motto--"Is Ia
never too late 10 mend.
What ould pig do II no wanted o
habitation2 He would tie q knot In bis
tail and cell il pgstye.
Never look at girls. They can't bear
1t, they regard it as 40 insult. They
wear their feathers, furbelows and frills
merely to CRAFTY their. mammas; that's
NIL.
Young ladies now have practice ol
shaking d bnils mould suReessively in
the faces of lovers who fail 10 come 10
time. This 10 the first warning" 40
they say In France
A man complained Of his pillow at a
hotel In the oil regions Those pillows
are made Of cork, a. an experiment,
blandly responded the landlord land
am sorry to say they are failure,