The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1865-06-21


days"
"Look here, honey--is you an angel ?"
"Not quite, ma'am; if l was, 1
shouldn't need to be hunting round after
COW! !"
"Well, stranger, that ar brinde does
kick like all the world but ! can't yet
understand it, honey, how ydu got to know
1t the first time you ever seed the critter."
''Ihats the proper time to Gee tho
fadltt Vt either cows or 'cdLc0,' ma'am
before WI get 'em stuck Oh to us, so that
we can't get 'om off again"
"Well say. What funny folks yod
Northern people H. Now thars cow
you can't complaih Of, Mr. Birney."-
The widow showed 'Slah, famous great
''muley," with white ftco and line along
her back, and prodigious bag. "Thar,
honey. Thars cretur that artt't blind,
nor wont kick"
NO, ma'am, nor eat either-unless
you feed her on mush or shortcakc. /
never heard tell Of putting set Of teeth
in COW, don't believe it can be done"
"Why, bless de good Lord, honey /
believe you is a witch. That ar cow
haint got no teeth, that's saltin. But
dcsnt see how you can find that out in
no time most"
The next offer was decidedly handsom-
est COW i'll the yard. A fncly-bult, red
and white animal, just in her prime. I
would have taken her at five dollars adj
vance, in preference to any other COW in
the yard. The Yankee mechanic laugh
cd, shook bis head, and objected,
80 No, thank ye, ma'am. | emit af-
ford to keep COW that goes dry four
calvihg time
'For the Lord Mr. Birney, l most
believes you is the raal old devil hisself."
80 no, Mrs. Conness. The devil
can't keep cows on his plantation. Too
hot there. Twould dry up the best COW
in Georgia in fifteen minutes. Now;
Mrs. Conness, want Il cow--a good one
and ityou'll let me hayc my choice out
Of that lot, I'll give you forty dollars for
her."
"Why, bless the good Lord, honeyi
thar amt 10 c!itter down thar Of no ao-
count no how"
"Well, I'll take the risk. Here's the
forty dollars
''Well, | declar-ihat beats all. |
never seed anything like that ar. But,
honey, il ever you aint satisfied, bring
the cretur back and take another choice,
or I'll give you your money again.
want TO be fair"
SO we adjourned to the field, and from
lot ol fifty animals, from inferior look
ing to fair, 'Siah selected little red
crumpled-horned, three -year-old, that, as
live, l wouldn't have given fifteen dol
lars for. Mrs. Conncss and advised and
demonstrated, but the Yankee was stub
born, and drove off his purchase in spite
of us.
In ten days from that morning, seventy
five dollars wouldn't have purchased that
helier OF JOSIAH Birncy; and in one
month from that day the Yankee Wheel
wright was acknowledgement to the
Widow ConnesS, ut a salary Of fifteen
hundred dollars year, and the privilege
ct deyoting Quarters Of his time to-
his trade, That man knew Cor, if ever
''p}hG da,, ABOUT three months after
that Jarnyard .Gasco, / said TO the stock
general:
"Bimey. how did YOU know that COW
was blind ?"
''Sho punched her nose against tho
sticks Of the rack more than half tho
time, instead Of steering straight in be-
tween EN-, us Il COW that could zee would
do"
''Aow about the kicker ,"
"Oh. that was plain. First | saw
the skin knocked Off her hind feet pretty
badly; and then she rolled her eyes, and
in her hind-quarters, whenever
one of the other cows happened to come
near her y kicking animal always does
that"
"les-but how could you see that
the spotted cow went dry SO long before
calving ~
"Why, by the lactcal ducts-wha.
dairymen call the milk-veins, Mr.. Nenet.
Instead of being well in under the belly,
and undivided, they lay far out On the
side, and branched all out, towards the
udder. a bad sign, sir, always"
/ learned by after experience that Jc-
sioh Birney cow criticisms were just.