The Newberry herald. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, 1865-10-25
Wit aQo DQNof:
4, Ward sFStrikes Iie."
SALT RIVER BoR1Ns, =

SALT tSIYER SCRlHS, -, w.
Nv Dearest Betsy Jane :-HeresI arn cum,
as Sii, k as Greas, out of the resch ct the
t'slings and arrays Of outragis .forchune," as
the Poit sez. Eff any body enqSires to Bald.
insvilie about Artemus Ward, that used to
be some in the Show BizGes, say to them
with Tearin ting ], ArtimeInous Chat the
Greek speii of my name,) the great Snowman
is dead-that is, TO ignoble persoots. Tell
Tell them -Artemus is no more Artemus but
''body corporated - tell 'em Betsey Jane
Ward is no more the wife of the captain of
the Baldinsvie millishy, but lady. Betsy
Jane I've struck lie lam as ritch as Crea-
sus My lie will spirit up in stream 2
hundred. feet Eli, and as thick az the main
mast of the runsideS. =. ~.
0 Betsy what q site Of mean work I've
dun in my past career 70 think thatI used
toghandle the Bo Constructors an other reptile
snaiks, in my show, an all for no use. l. get
poor and poorer, while the saaiks and tigers
get fat ; and at larst the pesky rebs confisca-
Gated my show, an "Othellys occupation was
gone" -,
whar theirs no lie. When I got poor (cauz
how was tu good natured like farther
Abram, and let the boys intu my show with
out payin) even my monkey made mouths at
me, as was wax fgger myself-that is, /
was patieneson monument. But nobody
"saw il" but me. Now its different. Shaks-
peer, oT some other Wise theologum sed sum
is born CRATE, some win gratencss by pack
of cards OF a horse race and the rest git big by
axident Now didn't win it, or gtit thurst
onto me, bat bored it out the stuns of Salt
River, wi,h.a government o7gur. -
Borin is of two kinds-borin for the Ecorpo-
rations (that issfbr the money! and afterwards
for the ile a#ai, you sec bord myself out
Of A. Ward into grate Company, called The
"0lcaginous Saline .Carboniferous Indication
Manufacturing COMPANY" tell you privit-
ly, it took splendid. We-that's me, and
Artemus and Artimcous & Mr.. Ward-opired
an offs, and from Mondy morn till Sundy
dawn we bookt the shares.
Our company was organized to witt had
II miluns of shares at cents q share, and
preserved for working capital" We garantied
everything. We told the moose boys an ut,l-
er oontrebands that we had the "royalty" and
"fte simple" of the lie on Salt River. We
told 'em we was opposed to aristockrisy and
big shares. We told 'en the shares was ''lin.
lLCO -SO ndSS IL Nl1G OuE
shares weAt up to II dollars and IA 10 cents
N IA days! We sold out an started anuther,
an this vas the yay re went on, till the vale
Of Salt River was bored Ikea pepper Box.
Betsy Jane, Eve guv you the mods oper7
andy Of striking lie. The.m man wot got rich
ON wot 9 talers gnv him, an inscribed patri.
otickaly on his Buggy. mine Zalers' Naid
scs's aeass5" was fool long side the Wards.
I'm comm to BaldinsFite soon to stop up
thine undistinguisht career, and aopen in
Bqasting establishment, worthy Of Betsey
Jane. Tell Zcke Biglow to make Coach 4,
and put on the panel 0rger as big as main
mast Of ship inten to make the Goldfish
higgins pale there ineffcctooal fires, as the
postle says The Artemus corporation sends
the oleagenius farewell kiss. No more at
present. From thy deaTsst luv.
AaTEHus WARD.