The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1865-10-20
Volume l2-Number %
McArone on Rhaumatl,m.

There are no roses in the wilder.
ness of vines that inclose the piazza
of the country house where write,
but an easterly wind, of much as
perity and virulencc, is making itself
very much ut home there, and whist.
ling like first class boatswain whose
mother was a calliopo. s.a ns
Easily enough this easterly wind
brings me to the rheumatism. al,
1t also brings the rheumatism 10
me. f I h. r.fti f"
Did you ever have red hairedman
throw milestone on your hand aud
then bore into your elbow with q con
tre-bitp ''' '. ."
That is the sensation of the inftmm.
matory rheumatism, as performed by
me for seven consecutive days and
nights. ...., l.. -.re...
| had some very fine eccentric and
humorous ideas. during this period
but when a fellows right thumb Is
swollen to the resemblance Of a Ham
burg sausage. and his fore finger has
a wire run through the bones length
wise, he is not in good condition to
write down even NE most brilliant
mental scintillations. 1i'.1iL
Neither is he expert with those
frail, unassuming, but potent instru-
ments, the knife and fork.
Buttons, also, at such times, pre-
sent formidable resistance, and the
razor becomes u vain and impotent
toy. ..... -.1 Isrs1i
The only thing, In fact, that runs
the easier, and slides the more. Wig,
orously for the rheumatism, is pro
family. .t le r-F T1Es
There is q peculiar twist 10 tho ell
bow, coupled with simultaneous
twinges in the hip and knee, that
produce great dueney in that partic'
ular. ..... Is,.-gq
The remedies that ones friends
suggest, are b. no means the least
troublesome portion OF the complaint.
One suggests common horse
chestnut,or chuck, eye carried in the
trousers pocket, as an infallible pre-
ventativc.
cotton batting is sure thing. f'
once knew of famous cricllct-
player who was cured of batting hys,
rheumatism, but / never knew that
the rule would work both wavs.
A third suggestion was tIInt I
should be envelOped from head to
foot in blue clay, not TO be disturbed
till it cracked of of itself f,...
| This last struck me as n GOOD idea
Especially if were to be placed at
the bottom of a pit six feet deer, TO
be thus envelcped, the hole to be then
filed up, and neat headstone erect
ed to mark the place.
1 am assured that the clay under
these circumstances, would crack
and come of itself, at about the time
when Gabriel performs his solo obli-
cato on the trumpet. ......
These are but invalid Conce'ts or
.he rheumatism rheumatic but caa
haYtly do better to-day. This paper
is, in fact, the first / have wriltcp.foc
the press for nearly fortnight, but
is sort OF experiment '''H
indeed, if il gives yol the same
pain in the elbow lpreat il. that t.it
gives me to write iy 1 sincerely .pily
You. .,.
/ But if, "a said, "easv readirg Il
ihard writing, this stands chancn
of being uncommonly easy ofperusaha
I am little out Of hunor with
Fate, or whatever you call if, for
this shabby treatment 10 was ratll
er rough to give fellow n whole
summer of bilious agOnies, with no
remittdnces to hope for, except re
mittcnt fevers, and then to crowd on
a crippling rheumatism at the end Ok
lit. ....s %. ..... -''-
1t is hard on fellows stamnHia,
and constitution and things Che
thought Of dumb-bells makes q weak
feeling creep down my back; all
when | walk, leaning on my cane,
you might take me FOE como oil
sport, like Professor liolmes Last
/ 4 o.yr