The mountain Democrat., 1865-12-30
rhe ssarsh ror Sohn smAtA.

our quiet country home, and at each visit
had most cordially pressed Us to. return
the corSpliment<5
Last October, business called me sud-
denly to the city Of B, where our
relatives resided, and without having time
to write and apprise. them of my coming,
was intending visit to the family Of
Mr.. John Smith.
With my accustomed carelessness,
had left his precise address at home in MY
notebook ; but | thought little Of H.; /
could easily find him, ! thought to my,
SELF as the cars set me down amid the
smoke and hustle Of B.
/ inquired for my relative Of the 6rst
backman came across.
he looked at me with an i'll suppressed
grin. What was the fellow laughing at
! To be sure my clothes were not Of the
very latest cut, and it is not just the
thing for any one out Of the army to wear
blue with bright buttons; bnt my coat
was whole, and my Aunt Bctsy had
secured the buttons with whitening and
soft soap until they. shone like gold. |
repeated my question with dignity.
" Nah SOu uTSSS Mc W AuS ISbluSuCS VI
Mr.. Smith,
| Mfr. Smith = he said slowly.
Yes, sir, Mr.. John Smith. lie mar
ried my fathers great uncle's eldest
daughter, Melinda
Il don't think I know a John Smith
with 4 wife MelinA.'
Join Smith seemed to be a common
noun with him, from the peculiar tone he
used in speaking Of that individual.
? 'Ah ? remarked h. then there is more
than one Of that name in this city ?
rather think there is
very well, then. Direct me to the
nearest To
The nearest is in West street. Second
left hand corner you'll see the name on
the door
passed on, congratulating myself on
the cordial welcome l should receive
from John and Melinda.
% | soon reached the place handsome
house with the name on silver door
plate-I rang the bell a servant appear
! ed.
! 'Mr. Smith in?
! NO, sir; Mr.. Smith is in the army
| Mrs. Smiths she?'
in the army ?-oh, no-she's at the
beach.
This is Mr. John Smiths house, is it.?
1T is.
WAS his wife's name Melinda, and was
! fls+v Drype before she was married, from
Squashvilleg
The man Redeemed and responded an.
grily;
I'll not, stand here to be insnlted p
Make of with yourself, or I'll call the po
| lice. / thought from the first that you
we're an entry thief, but YOU don't play
no game on me = and he banged the door
in my face.
a thief! If had not been in such o
hurry to find the Smiths | should have
given that rascally fellow n sound chaSti-
sing. on the spot.
Inquiry elected the fact that John
Smith resided in Arch street. Thither
bent my steps :; maid servant answered
my ring.
'Mr. Smith in p
Before the girl could reply, big, led
faced naa;iumped out of the shadows be-
hind the door, and laid his heavy hand
upon my shoulder.
Yes, sir, he cried in avoicc of thun-
der. Mr.. Smith is in yes, sir; for once
he's in; he stayed at home all day on pur-
pose to catch you and now, by Jupiter
L have my revenge'
Sir said ], there must be some mis-
take. Allow me to inquire if you are Mr..
Smith,?
III inform you about Mr. John Smith
in a way you won't relish, if you don't
settle the damages forthwith. Five thous-
and dollars is the very lowest figures
and YOU must leave the country
Good gracious!' | cried, what do you
take me for? You'd better be careful, or
You'll get your head caved in I
IN cave your head in for you, you
young villain = cried he, springing at me
with his cane.
oh, John, dear John = exclaimed a
shrill female voice, and tatl figure in a
sea of flounces bounced down the stair
way. Don't, don't, for the love of heaven
don't murder him
who the deuce do you take me for ?
cried 7, my temper rising.
1T looks well for you to ask that qnes'
ton = sneered the man, you who have
won my wife's heart, and are here now to
plan to elope with her! I've found it all
out you needn't blush, and -
Il beg your pardon for interrupting
you,' said |, hut have never seen your
wife before. perceive she is not Melln-
da, the eldest daughter of my fathers
great uncle
Sir, do you deny you are VIM. Jones !!
Do you deny that you are in love with my
Wife p
4 am not a Jones; have not the hon
or, sir; my name is. Parkwell, Henry
Parkwell, of 'Squashville! and with bow
took myself off
After that had called at the residences
of thretJohn Smiths none of which was
NV Mr.. Smith and nothing occurred
worthy of note. =,
NV next Mr.. Smith resided in'POrtland
street. Thither bent my steps; 1t was
very small house-eVidently not the
house of wealth and cleanliness. made
INV way up to the front door, through a
wilderness of old rags, broken crockery,
old tinware, ETC., scattering flock OF
hens, and rousing q snappish little terrier
from his nap on the steps. ..
A red faced woman answered my rap,
but before l could make my customary
inquiry, she opened upon me like two
edged butcher knife.
well, of all the impudent rascals that
veer see, you beat theslotl l want to
know if YOU had the cheek to come back
here again? You'd like to sell me anoth-
er German silver tea pot, aud another
brass pin, to dear Araminty-wouldnt
your -.
oh. you psedn't beg We don't be.