Pomeroy weekly telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy, Meigs County, Ohio) 1860-1866, 1865-04-20
Josh Billings ON Courting.

Courting is luxury, it il Use water, it is
the pa spell ov the soul. The man who has
never courted has lived in vain he has been
blind man among landscapes, and waters
scapes, he has been def man in the land of
hand Origins, and by the side ov murmuring
canals. Courting IL like 2 little springs ov
water that start out from under rock ut the
fut ov mountain, and runs down hill side by
side, singing and dancing and scattering each
other, eddying and frothing and kaskading,
now hiding under the bank; nowfu of shad-
der, till bymeby tha jine and then they 90
slow ! am in favor oy long courting; it gives
the parties chance to find out each uther's
trump kards, it IL good exercise, and IL Just
as innersent as 2 nerino lambs. -
Courting IL like strawberries and cream
wants to be did slow then you get the faver.
l have saw folks git acquainted. fall in luv,
GIT marrld, settle down, and git tew work, in
three weeks from date, This IL list the way
some folks learn trade--akounts for the
great number of almity mean mechanicks we
hav and the poor jobs that turn out
Perhaps itiz best if should state sum good
advise to young men who are about to court
with final view to matrimony, as it was.
In the fust place, young man, you want tew
git your system awl rite, and then find young
woman who is willing tew be courted on the
square. - +r '-F
The rext thing il to find out how old she
", which yu can dew bi askin her, and she
will sa that she is 10 years old, and this you
will find won't be far. from out ov the wa.
The next best thing IL to begin moderate;
sa onse every mite in the week for the ilist six
months, increasing the dose as the patient
seems to require. s,r.[. j. 90, --.-,,,,.
1t is fust rate wa to court the girls moth
er a leetle on the start, for there IL one thing
a woman never despises, and that IL leetle
good counting, if it IL done on the square. AT.
ter the fust year, you will begin to be well ac-
quainted and will begin to like the Dizziness.
There is thing | alwas advice, and thatiz
not to swop fotograls oitener than once in 10
days, unless you forget how the gal looks.
OCCASIONALLY yu want to look sorry and draw
IN yure wind as tho yu had pain !. this will set
the girl to teezing yu tew find ou, what aila
you. -a-. .c o.I
Evening meetings are q goodthing teW tend,
1t will keep yure religion in tune; and then
if yure gal happens tew be there, VI acksident,
she can ask you TO 60 home with her ''
As a general thing l'woaldnft brag on 9TH
er gals much when was courtin'. 1t mite
look as tho you knu tew mutch ... ..,. III,
lfyou will court three years in this wa all
The time on the square, if you don't 81 it il q
eetle the sickest time in yure life, you can
slt measured for hat at my expense, and pa
or it.
Don't court for monny, nur booty, nor rela-
'huns those things are jist about as the kero.
'ene lie refining Dizziness, liable tew git out
.f repair and bust at eny minute Court gal
or fun, for the luv yu bear her, for the virtue
md Dizziness there IL in her; court her as YOU
would court farm for the strength of the sile,
md the perfeckshun ov the title; court her as
no she want a fule and yu nuther; court her
n the kitchen and in the parlor, over the wash
ub and at the pianner court this wa young
nan, and ifyu don't gita, wife, the fault wont
'e in the courting.
Young man, you can rely on Josh Billings
nd if you kant make these rules wurk, list
end for him, and he will show you how the
hing il did---it shan't cost VI sent,