The Tipton advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Cedar Co., Iowa) 1856-1962, 1865-12-28
Mr.. Nasty Dreams a Dream. Emil
CRATES to Mexico.

Mr.. Nasby" Dreams Dream. m.-.He Emil
CRATES to Mexico.
| WASHINGTON, Dec. 10, 1865.
! Last mite | was the victim Nv another
dream. Eff l don't quit this explorin the
realms Of the fuehir 10 my sleep, | shall
become a second Saint John. Ef 80, l
make no doubt my revelations will be Of
a remarkable startlin character.
Methawt the Ablishints had asserted
the power We diskivcred they possest,
after the late elecshuns, and had gone
the whole fgger. They had forced the
South into the humiliashen Nv allowin
niggers to testify, and in the Northern
States had given en- tho elective fran
chise. Nv course the educated and re.
dned Democracy wood never consent to
sssE:.a = ds
seeker wood hoomiliatc himself treatin
nigger afore an elecshun-it becin a
article Nv faith with US never to drink
with niger onless he pays for it.
Therefore, bein helpless, and resolvin
never to submit, the heft Nv ths Democ.
rasy determined to emigrate 10 body to
some land where the Anglo Sackson Good
roo, where there was no mixter of the
disgustin African. Mexico wus tho
country chosen, and methawt the entire
party, in one solid column, marched
there. Our departure was a ovation
The people on our youte wuz all dressed
in white ez token Wv Joy, and from ev-
cry house hung banners with inscriptions
4 onto EN-, sich ez:
"Now is our hen roosts safe!''
"Csnada on its way to Mexico!"
"Poor Mexico-wo bewail thy fate!"
Our march resembled very much that
Nv the children Nv Isrel. Our noses wuz
the pliers Nv fire by mite, and our breath
the piller Nv smoke by day.
On our arrival to Mexico, the natives
of that country, struck probably with awe
at the majestic and tlamin expression Nv
our countenances, hastily gathered up
their linen, aud silver spoons, and hosses,
and sich, and retreated to the mountains.
1t wuz kompIimcnt to US that them ez
hadn't ennything remained
Finally wcrcached plain where We,
the modern children Nv Isrel, decided to
RENAME, and Nv coarse, the fust thing to
do wuz to form Guvurnment.
Mothawt Fernardy Wood Nv New
York, wuz chosen viva voce, cz Presi.
dent, and he STEPPED forerd to hev the
oath administered. to him, which WI,
2 be dun by the oldest Jv.t;s Nv th,
pecco Nv the late stait nv Moo Gersey
which hez committed suicide. Here ,
new trouble ensooed-thers wuEn't I
bible to be found in tho whole encamp-
ment. The difficulty wuz got over by .
New York Alderman yellin out, "Neve'
mind the oath--What's the yoose w
any oath he takes?" So he wuz declared
President
Prest Wood then proceeded TO orga
nize. He requested sioh ez had held
commissions in the army Nv the yoonited
states to step forerd three PAGES. Gems.
Micklelan, Buel, Fltzjohn Porter, & Sic.
cum slept forerd, and with em some
1000 a part Nv whom he'd held quarter.
masters commissions and whose account.
"Jest afore the battle, mother" -
Didn't balance, but wich allez did jss,
after, and others who he'd bin dismist for
bein in the rear, when their sooperiorf
desired to see EN- in the front, and who
consistently considered it d--d Ablish
un war, wich they didn't approve Nv, nc
how
Then hevin ascertaiasd the materia
for officerin his army he axed all then
who he'd bin in tho service ez priyatss ts
step forerd. 10000 obeyed, and tn,
President asked the fust one where b.
enlisted, who ansered ez follows:
cat Moo York, April II, 1864, boun
ty 81, 900; and at Philadelphia, April Il
1864, bounty 500; and at Pittsburgh
Apri! l6, 1864, bounty $500; and d
Cincernati, Aprill9, 1864, bounty s4o0
and at"
"Enough" said Fernandy, and glanci,
down she line, and seefn all the face.
were Nv the same style and expression
he asked no more Nv om any questions.
i Remarkin that it wuz well enough /,
establish church, he desired all whc
were ministers Nv the Gospel to step for.
erd. Il slept out aud desired to explain
They Good not say that they were jes,
now in full connection with any church
They he'd bin, but their tooshne
Ablishin Synods and conferences he'd
accoosed em Nv Irregularities in hos.
tradin, and various other Irregularities,
and suspended EN-, and silenced EN- and
sich, becoz they were Democrats, but
The President shrugged his shoulders,
and asked all who Good read to step out.
About one half answered, and then he
requested sich Nv this number ez Good be
prevailed upon to accept small Office,
and who believed themselves fit, to step
out agin, and to my unutterable horror
and CONSERVATION, every one but FIVE
stepped out, ez brisk ez 50 many bees
Immsjitly there was sn uproar. Them
sz coodent read sworo vocifsrously that
there WIZ nothin fair about that arrange.
u Al