The Iowa transcript. (Toledo, Tama County, Iowa) 1858-1866, 1865-09-06
"Scllislg" a Fellow.

Last summer, while engaged in the tobac-
co and sugar business, used TO have for n
customer in cheap cigars one of those know
ing fellows whose knowledge serves better
to bore his victim than advancing science
\ on couldn't make him believe that-oh no?
TEL him there were regalia cigars that cost
$40 per thousand lit might do 10 stuff
down the Threats Of those who knew no bet
ter; he was none Of them And so it was
with everything; he always knew best II
always appeared to be his delight to draw
me into some controversy, no matter what
the subject, in order TO hear himself hold
forth. | tried every way could think of to
circumyent him, but at last did succeed in
laying him out as fiat as founder.
II was on Saturday afternoon, he came
in, made his purchase, and seated himself to
deal me out his usual portion! but ! was
awake for him.
Captain, said l. az have made up my
mind to go to California, and il you wish to
60 into speculation, now is your time
'.As how?" said he.
..Why, you see them fifteen boxes Of CT
CARS? Well there are two hundred and fifty
in each box, and will let you have the
whole fifteen at n low rate, providing you
will take them all"
Very WELL said my friend, .'let's hear
the C0uultlOnS.
.You give me one cent for the first box,
two for the second four cents for the third
and 50 double up on every box"
"Done!' said he: ..fetch on your cigars
Spose you think haven't money enough
Ell?
Mot at al, SO let's proceed; here's the
first box"
lie drew from his pocket lcathcrn purse,
and ont of handful of coin
"And here's the cent, said he, depositing
green discolorcd copper on the counter
Heres your second box"
And here's your two cents"
Very well, here's your third box"
'.And here's your four CENTS" said he
chuckling.
Here's your fourth box"
Exactly, and here's your eight cents ?
lia ha ha old fellew--go on.
Here's your fifth box" said l, handing
down another box.
land here's your sixteen cents
Here's your sixth box. !"
"And-ha! ha! ha heres your thirty
two cents
Heres your seventh box"
.sAnd here--ha! by Jovc the joke is get
ting too rich-herc's your sixty-four cents,
and nearly half your cigars are gone"
Here's your eighth box" said l assum-
ing a cool indifference that perfectly aston
ished the fellow.
'.And here's your dollar and twcnty-cight
cents"
..ilcre's your ninth box.
"And here's your-let me sec--ah two
dollars and fiftysix cents"
Here's your tenth box
Here he drew his wallet thougtfully, and
on the slate made small calculation.
"And here's your five dollars and twelve
cents
Here's your eleventh box"
..And here's your--twicc five is ten, twice
twelve is twenty fourteen dollars and TWEEN
tyfour cents"
AT this stage Of the game he had got quite
docile, and ! continued
Heres your twelfth box, hand over
twenty dollars and forty eight cents
Here the globulcs Of perspiration, large
as marrow-fat peas stood out in bold relief
on his face, but at length he doled out the
sum.
Here's your thirteenth box-fork over
your forty dollars and ninety-six cents.
At this crisis he looked perfectly wild.
The sweat was pouring off him in streams,
and the tobacco juice was running out Of
his mouth.
"F-o-r-t-y-n-i-nt-y-s-ix. II do, but if
do will be hanged will. :"