The weekly union record., 1865-09-09
Folling a Rival.
MaemiHans Magazine.

/ l ne crittef loves me. l KNOW Sle loves
me !" said Jonathan Doubikins. as be sa, upon
/ the cornfipid feJce. medfaiing on the course OF
his true love, that was running jlst as Shak
1 speare always said it did-rnther roughly.
/" Ii Sukey Peabody has taken shine TO that
gwaky, long shanked siammerin' shy critfer.
/ Gusset, Just canse he's city teller, she amt
/ the gal | took her fnr-ihat's sariin. M,
its The old fnlks-darn their ugly pictures.
Old Miss Peabody was alters dreadful hifaiu
Tin critter full Of big notions. and the old
mans regular soft head driven bout by his
wife Just as our old one eyed rooster is driven
bout by our canianker"us five toed Dorkin
| hen .But if dnn't spile his ian nv name
amt Jonathan. I'm going down TO The city
by the railroad next week and when | come
back-wake snakes that's ALL
The above snliloquy may serve 10 give the
reader some slight idea of the :" lay of the
land 10 The pleasant ru tic village where the
speaker resided.
Mr. Jonathan Douhkins was young farm
er we'll TO do in the world and looking out for
wife and had been paying his addresses To
Miss Susan Peabody, of that ilk, with fair
prospect of success, when city acquaintance
of the Peabodys, nne Mr. CorneIiu. Gussei,
who kept retail dry good shop in Hanover
street, Boston, had suddenly made his appear
ance in The field and had commenced the "cut
ting out game. Dazzlei with the prospect
of becoming genilenan's wife. and restered
with the mporluniiies of her aspiring mama,
The village beauty had begun 10 waver when
her old lover determined on a last and bold
stroke to foil his arrival He went to The city
and returned. OF bis business there he said
nothing. not even 10 pumping maiden aunt
who kept his house tor him. He went not
near he Peabodys, but labnred in his corn
field, patiently awaiting the result of his ma
chlnallons.
The next day Mr. Gussei was with the old
flks and their daughter in the best room of
The Peabody mansion, chatting as PLEASANTLY
as may bP. when the door opened and in
rushed very dirty and furious Irish woman.
Is il there ye are. Misiher CorneIins - she
screamed. addressing the asfonsht d GnSse'.
" Come out of that. before | fetch We We spal-
/ peeu Is that what We promised me afore
the prasle, We hayihen naenr! Rnnniu' away
from me aud the chiIder. forsakn' your lawful
welded wife. and runnIn' afther the Yankee
gals. ve irfdel 2?
Woman there mus. be some mistake
here, siammered Gusset taken ali abacl by
! this charge.
bNh IL On III Il i-tdkt. We SdFplt. ".
. wirra wirra was il tar the likes OF We
sacked lnt!e Dernis McCar'y who loved the
ground 'rod on and all htkase ye promised
10 make u l'dv Of me-, ye dry thafe OF the
worrnld VIII We c"me along 10 the railrnnd
s'a'i N, where | left little Patrick. because lie
was too sick wid the small pnx to come any
fufder. or viii ye wait till drag ye p
"G-go along CAPPED Gusset "go-
and Ill tnllnw ynu.'
| lie thnnght it best to iemporize.
In give ye ten mnntts." said he virago
II We amt there. ifs nv cuzzln. Mr.. Thadiv
Mnlgrnddery. will be afther ye, We Ihafe.' And
away went this uubdden gnest."
Mr.. GusSet was vet engaged in stammerinc
out denial nf all knowledge of the virago.
when ne pprlnr door opened again. and a lit
tie blnck eyed. hatcher faced woman. in a
hashy silk gown, ani cap with many ribbons
perehed upon the Top of her head, invaded the
>anciiy Of the parlar.
Is he here ?" she cried in decided French
accent. Then she added with ii scream, "Ah !
mon Dieut fe roIs. Zre he is. Traltre
monster. Vat for ynu run away from me !?
Dis two tree year nevaire see you. nevaire,
and nv heart broke yer bad entirely"
"Who are you?" cried Gnssef, his eyes
starting ont of his head, and shivering from
head to foot.
-" He asks who am 0 Indies 0. you
yer respectable Old gentlehomme, hear Val he
ask Who | am. perfde! alb I'm your
wife !"
a. never saw you before, so help me God r
cried Gusset energer icay
Don't vnn swear ~ said Deacon Peabody;
p" if you do. I'll kick you into firs, by GoIly
! won't have no profane or vulgar language in
my honse."
20 bless you! bless yon J respectable old
man. Tell him he must come viz me. Tell
him | have spoken 10 Ze constable. Tell
him" sobs interrupted her uttersnce.
=" Its peskv bad business = said the dea-
con. CIafins with uuwuutrd ire. -Gus-ai
you re n rascal
Take care, Deacon Peabody, take care p
said the unfortunate shopkeeper
Il remarked you was rascal, Gussett.
You've gone and married Two wives and that
er'S fat burglary. eff | know anything bout
the Revised Staroois" 3"
Two wives = shrieked The French woman.
=" Half dozen. for anght know 10 the con-
trarvr p said the deacon. Now you clear
out OF my house. go way 10 the station. and
clear out into Boston. won't hev nothing
more TO do with you
" But deacon. hear me-"
u don't want to hear you, you wretch !"
cried The deacon. stopping his ears with his
hands. Marrying two wives. and comm
courtin' third. Go long Clear out"
Even Mrs. Peabody. who was inclined to
put in good word for the culprif, was silenced.
Susan turned from hun in horror. and IN utter
despair be fed TO The railway station. holly
pursued by the clamorous and indignant
French woman.
That same afternoon. SIS Miss Snsan Pea
body was walking towards the village. she was
orertaken by Jonathan Doubkins. dressed 10
his best, and driving his fast going horse be-
fore his Sunday go-to meeting cbsise. He
reined mp and accns'ed her.
Halla. Suke get in and take a ride
I" Don't keer if do, Jonathan replied the
young lady, accepting the profered seat.
= say, vou,' said Jonathan. grinning, "tbat
ere ciiy ieller's turned out pooiy pup. ANT
be-"
Its dreadful if it's trne,' replied the
young lady.
You had narrer escape. didn't ye p pur