West-Jersey pioneer., 1865-12-09
LOVE AND LOVERS.

Dictionaries and Latin derivations have
nothing to do with the little noun, as far
as we are concerned. We do not mean
that sentimental passion that develops
itself in Byron's Poems, Moore's Melodies,
and pink billets-doux scented with pat
chouli, and containing three-quarters OF
an idea to pint Of ink. We do not mean
the natural inclination that young people
of either sex have for each others society
neither do we mean the spasmodic or
deal that is held up in feverish sensation
novels; something that resembles real
love about as much as distorted Chinese
idol looks like healthy humanity! Love,
according to our Interpretation, is not born
in night-it strikes its roots into more
enduring foundation than occasional fancy
The devotion that fourishes only through
brief honey-moon's existence, and fades
away before life's more serious aspect, can
not be worthy of the name. We want no
such hollow limitations as this. Our love
is all-enduring, all.forgiving, all-extenu-
ating. It extends into the merest tribes
of everyday existence-it scars up into
the highest and more exalted spheres
1t watches the face with ever-anxlous
tenderness, it anticipates the unspoken
wish, it is perpetually on the qn vave:-
Nothing is too small or inconsequentlal to
escape its vigilance. 1t sews on strings
and buttons before they are fairly loose ;
it browns the puddings with artistic ex-
actitude; it keeps the book or newspaper
ready to the hand ; it never retorts 81 told
YOU sol! 1t does not bang the door with
masculine unconsciousness when the head
aches or weak nerves are in the ascendant ;
it keeps up all the little lover-like ways OF
its courtship days; it makes tender al
lowance for smoky chimneys, cross SER
wants, and sick babies Our love Is for
daily domestic use, something that, as the
| advertisements say, "no family should
be without !"
Lovers are not husbands" say the
sage givers of good advice. No, but hus-
bands should be Improvements on lovers
Should be, we say; what pity that they
are not always! Take our advice, girls,
and don't marry until you are quite sure
that all this asseverated devotion is real,
and not spurious. If you have bad ser.
want you can discharge him, but bad
husband is not to be got rid Of on any
terms! Getting married on false pre-
lenses is generally apt to turn out rather
bad business. We think the wise world
| would open its eyes in surprise if it really
knew the reason of half the matrimonial
alliances that it sanctions every day OF its
life. Some marry for home some Tor
position in society; some through a
ackadaisical desire for what they call
sympathy )" some to get their stockings
mended and their bronchitis nursed ;
some to get possession of a meek house
hold slave cheaper than she can be OBJ
tanned in Circassian market; some to
avoid the burning shame and disgrace OF
dying an old maid So the world goes.
But nevertheless, to the honor of humani-
ty be it spoken, there are still abundance
Of real genuine love.matches being made !;
there are yet people IN existence who
| marry because they suit one another physl-
cally, morally, and mentally
There is a good deal to be said on this
| particular topic of suitability. Do you
remember the old proverb-" Love goes
| where it is sent p' Congeniality is not to
be accounted for by any. human conjectures
or calculations Make up your mind that
man will be suited by just such or such
style of woman, and 10 and behold ne
destroys your whole fabric Of logical rea-
soning by going and marrying some one
who is in all respects Numerically oppo-
site to your ideal. just so it is with the
girls; when you have found some one
whom you fancy to be their very counter
part, they suddenly astonish you by turn
ing round and preferring the last person
in the world whom you would have
dreamed of! And then, after all, these
contradictory young people will probably
have the audacity to be very happy TO-
gether all their lives long. We don't be-
| lieve in matchmaking, according to the
popular acceptation of the term. Hall
the misery Of married life springs from
1 this maneuvering system. Matches ongh'
to make themselves, and will, if you only
| let them alone, just as spontaneously anc
| naturally as little birds pair off in spring
| Sometimes, however, in the great whir
of society, we meet young people who
seem as it were temporarily isolated, ane
the reigning Mrs. Grundy looks compass
sionately on and whispers mysteriously il
YOUR ear, " She has been disappointed /?
Disappointed in what We should rathe
; be tempted to say she has had a provi
Dental escape. It is certainly not yer.
pleasant to see an admirer drift away from
you into some other current; it is no
agreeable to discover that your affection
has been thrown away on an undeservins
object but it is a great deal worse to b.
tied for life to a scamp. Blessed be sucl
disappointments, say we, even thougl
they be bitter draughts at first. 1t
better to be disappointed as a girl thar
broken-hearted as wife
And if a young man, to use the com
mon parlance, gets Tilted" we advls
him not to waste too many lamentation
over his bad luck, but to enter the lis
again. A girl who trihes with the SINGER
: homage of an honest heart may be yer.
attractive and fascinating, but she vii
hardly be likely to make good wife, ant
$ we counsel our masculine friends to CIV
her wide berth. Because you hav
been deceived once, it does not necessaril..
follow that there is no more truth no
honesty in the world. Put a little philo
sophical salve on your wounds and tr.
again. And instead Of grumbling owe
your little bit of adversely, thank you
stars that you were aroused from the dc
lusive dream before it was too late, eve
though the waking might have been a lii
tie rougher than was altogether pleasant
There are plenty of nice girls left, an
= your chance is quite as good as it was be
fore. A distinguished divine of the pref
ent day asserts that it is necessary for
Iyoung man to make just SO many falls
starts" in life before he may fairly be sal