davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
GFMAT RMNGMDY
FOR THE atUsdda
Co NsTIT U TIoN ,
And the only known Remedy
5igl ron .1
DIABETES and DIsEAsEss of the
/. KIDNEYS nnd BLADDER.
CONSTITUTION WATER

las been pronounced by the Medical Faculty and the
bubble, 10 be the most wonderful remedy for the per
Snanent cure Of all diseases Of the STOMACH, LIVl
EsR, KIDNEYS and BLADDER that has ever beon
II IL not a MINERAL WATER. Ills from expc-
kionce that tCONSTITU TON WATER has emenat-
hd and we now ray let no man doubt, whom single
bottle has been known TO cure diseases which the
best medical talent in the country failed TO relieve.
Z "A remedy possessing the virtues Of Constitution
Mnter cannot be clAssed under "quhckD ,prepara-
lions as II il now used by the most scientific prpc-
itoncrs in the city. 1t Is only second class phys-
ans that cry down popular remedies, while the bet
Scr skilled make uso Of every means 70 accomplish
euro; and the suecsss Of the physician increases
Il his knowledge Of different remedies enables him
10 produce cure, while others fail in the attempt
Boience is satisfied with tho truth. ftafPl .
I Give Constitution Water fair trial-We moan you
who arc under some SPECIALISTS care from year 10
foar, and We particularly aude TO ladies who nre
Constantly ros0rting to LOCAL TREATMENT, and all
orts Of local applications for diseases, with much
shance Of success As there would be from local ap
ications 10 the throat for diseases Of the brain.
I We have always been careful to use language in
ur circular that could not shock the most delicate
rganiiati0n, but we receive many communications
1 ON persons for whom Constitution Water Is adapt
A. and Of whose disease no mention has been mado,
nat we have to the conclusion that If the rem
tdy Is capable Of producing cure, no matter what
lhe disease may be, 1t should be made known. The
iaedicine is put up for the public and there should
! D no exceptions, -rfg a a~-r .
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06

ONE person writes, her daughter was
cnred Of fits OF nine years' standing, and
81. vitus' dance of two years. y,i, sI.
ANOTHER writes, his son was cured
after bis aesh had almost wasted away.
The doctors pronounced the case incura-
able. fs isis
ANOTHER was cured Of Fever and Aguo
after trying every medicine in his reach.
ANOTHER was cured Of Fever Sore
which hnd existed fourteen years. y
ANOTHER of Rheumatism Of eight
years. l5.4 =.
Gases innumerable Of Dyspepsia and
Liver Complaint could be mentioned in
which the Purifier and Pills
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
s1lFor The Ohio statesmAn.l nifn
MsCE.ELLAN Is COMING

-, Nsf3 - -'-'all IA 4
iH'H N'f t41e ny LADY. t.ntss 4
c---S-u.l.- :. r.,.,,. - f
1Ao Se'. r..''
- Msplsusn h coming. oh bo oh hot sah
Mcclellan Il coming. oh hoi ohhoi .g I
pc .C,', oo,'An = = oo.r,rs' ~ - ~, hho, -. n, t
ri eo'''n .N : SV'A''''' ''A " ~ I,.ot
sWhen In yirginiss Western woods. n'iaD' /
He say'd the helpless spar'd their goods
~, Twas thus he won the rebels Ger ~,
~ 80 Z. ,,-,,-l-r',- A..,.sg
ManI y r' = 80 = . 't7r7r, ~, .
~ Al acfrst Bull Runs DISASTROUS fight +,
80 The South had put the North 10 fight
Then Lincoln" sen. Tor Little mac,
.t,,.c,.u.; ~ ,.hho,.,.
4s y1'''-H ' - ~
AT Malvern Hill-at Antietam.
The stars and stripes the vict'ry won s
For Mac was there 70 guide the nea-
y sl151I ,,.,r.,,.-,,-.L,- ,.
"N - '''s' W. w. w '''.'''' ~
AtGettysburg. when hard assail'd,
= Our war-worn troops had almost fail'd
u Lo-"hac Is on the heldF' was heard
~ -" ~ w.S,.,,1 49, .s -. ~ nI.,.,s..
& ep' q "ooi'Nsn 70 'onnns' VII nv w A'' s'''
Our soldiers almost worship him,
Who led them in the battles din!
.s Thor very brows will crimson red
~ 7I'e,,sr,,-,,- 49, ,,.,.,.,
eA = '''''"e' W
This "Bac' now the peoples man.
And bravely he will lead the van;
chief Of Jeffersonian School.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06

ELEGsANT LACE GOODS.
V,TfREAD and French Lace Barbss: 1f I.
\ Black and White Barbe Lace for Sashes and
Point Lace Collars and Sets. r
Valcnciennes I.accs. Collers and Handkerchiefs.
Thread and French Lace Yeils. n. .nr
Real Thread Gnipurc and Blond Lace Edgines.
Binck AK Lace Inserting for Dress Trimmings.
Laco Collars and Sleeves In Sets-richly trimmed.
Waite blond Lacey for ycils and Dresses, ~ I.
Point Applique LAGOS In all widths, - -.
jsn1o'0l Nos. % TO % South High street.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
''.,.' &c r,s., Ayers
$500 :. s.s'.'. A.P.!4RILLI.A I!

|
SOR0FULA AND SCROFUL0US DISEASES.
From Emery Edes a sreL-knopn merchant Of
~ VIZ 'F' OrJ6rd, Maine. &
q have sold large quantities OF your SARsAPAn-
lila, but never yet one bottle which failed OF the
desired effect and full satisfaction 10 those who took
t. As fast people try II, they agree there has
been no medicine like II before IN our community
1r.,,v,tton. pimpIea. Blotches p,iatules.
Yx,.IrSnr a,d ali o;.aaaaa ~ tta atir
otcers' oores, aAu ~. ~, -. ", 1855 -
81 only do myrduty 70 You and the public, whom
NV 10 tnnt YOU uuDIibll oil tne Ine-
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
Irritation Of the Neck of the Bladder,
n inflammation Of the Kidneys,
Catnrrh OF the Bladder.
Btrnnguary, or Burning una Painful
if9N T4 - Urimatings ~ OH

For these diseases Il IS truly sovereign remedy.
dose has been known to relieve the most urgent
toms. ~. m. I. -. .t.s. f..f q .T,.,..f-t
Arc you troubled with that distressing pain in the
fpl day Of the Constitution Water will relieve you
Ike magic. oH gl.lfrs R t.sa 81. q ego y
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
Stone I'm the BIadder, Calculus, Grav
ei, Brick Dust Deposit, Etc, ETC.,

Diseases arising from faulty secretion-n the one
case being too lite and accompanied by severe pain,
and in the other too profuse secretionwhich viii
bo speedily cured by the TlH iaif
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06
Excelsior Envelopes.

Although wS do not promise 10 work ss l6w s some
Of our. ncighbors, who hnveaEa0 PRINTING
01fkces, W do guarantee better stock and wori
thsn can 81 found u this city.
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06

3 lIl'e GC0NNSSTTIITTU!yTTII90NN WwAaTEB W aTEB 2
EtH1 G0NSTiTfITii0N WATER
isI CONSTITUTION WATER u.
3 IN 4G1 C0NSTlTuTI0N MATER
F C0NSTITuTI0N WATER bod
81 sat GGXNNSSTTiITfflTfXNN WWhhTTEERR " ei
ua w CONSTITUTION WATER iIsi
THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE ONLY KNOWN Remedy FOR
b.. THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE ONLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
THE'0NLY KNOWN REMEDY FOR
-wm-z
Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1864-04-06

nc Is especially adapt
ed toIenther. " .
And we claim as an especial
Inherit, that 1t sticks Patches and
lLinings 10 Boots and Shoes sniff
lciently strong without stitching.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
An IncreduIous Man

A Newark, New Jersey, correspondent
is responsible for the following:
Our friend CASTOR is Jerseyman, and
Thinks jersey is az good as any State in
the Union. Sometime since he was travels
ing in the West. The cars stopped three
miles east of Rock Island, at a little town
called Moline, aud q six foot specimen of
equatterdom entered took the vacant seat
by the side of CASTOR. when the following
conversation ensued: ..
Squdtter in loud voice): say, strsu-
ger, Illinois 10 q great State.
JerSeymGn Yes.
SquGtte': Stranger, Whsr did you come
frOm2
Jerseymdn New Jersey.
Squatter with look Of contempt: Little
Jerseyf
JerSeymGn Yes.
Squdtter Any factories in Jerseyf
JerSegmdn Yes.
Squaiter Well. I've lived nigh on to
sixty years, and I've never seen ANYTHING
yet made 10 Jersey.
just then the conductor called out Rock
Island, and CASTOR said:
Come out here. my old friend
The equatter and crowd followed him
along the platform, up to the engine, and
then CASTOR said:
Friend, can yOu read p
Certainly I cam was the answer.
well amt that . nice engine p
Yes. splendid
We'll, then, read these Words-'Manu.
featured at Patterson, New Jersey
WELL said the squatter, I'm Sold
Hang me if ever again argue with q Jersey
Yankee y
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
Fremont slowed Away.

Mr.. Lincoln is doing his best to DISPOSE
OF rivals OF the abolition nomination In
View>of the reported assignment of Fremont
to South Carolina, where he will have
nothing to do bot to look out for the OAR.
kies and the yellow fever, the Rorld inns
AGNES the following correspondence to have
taken place: 80,
Fremont to Lineo'1-If YOU are noniua-
ted BY the Junei Convention, l. will kill
your chances by running as a stump can
didate against you. Fl
Lincoln to Fremont-TO get You and
your pretensiuns out Of the way. / hereby
assign you to the Department Of the South.
in the hope that. filling Gen. MitchelPs
place, you may meet Gen.. Mitchells fate.
Now in what respect is your plau bette,
than my plant
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
An Aged, Herse.

A Concord, New Hampshire, oorrsspora
dent, whose writings are new to the Draw
er. sends rs the following:
Bill Jones, Of c., !, q noted dealer in
old horses. One day last week he bought
an old circus horse, and after driving him
about town be stopped at salooa for bis
eleven O'Clock drink. leaving the horse un-
tied. The animal began to travel around
q circle, as Was bis custom under the can.
vass but be had made only two rounds
when boy about fifteen years old ran
out, stopped him, and leading him up 70
said:
Here's your horse.'
Why didn't you let him be said Jones.
He knows more than you do
That was rather damper on the bow,
but looking up to Jones, with his finger on
bis nose, be replied: -1d11-
yearsP
Jones hsin't sold that animal yet.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
VOL. q NO. 43.
An Auction scene.

StrolliDg through COR city, we CHANGED
Into an auction room to see what BARGAINS
we could make. The auctioneer was
upon the stand with Q piecr of cali
co.
Eight cents o yard, who will say
IN give you tent says an old la
Going at teni Going gone Yours.
madam; walk in and settle
i did't bid on it, sxclsiued the old LADY
advancing.
Well thank persons not to bid. If
they don't want an article. said the auot.
ioneer. sear "
Going. then. at eighth who say. mo,s
Nine cents.' says an old gentleman Op-
posite to Us.
Nine ! nine who says ten Going at
nine! going gonel Yours sir; cash takes
it at nine oents.'
4 did't bid said the old gentleman. Il
DONE want it, wouldn't give you Eve cents
for the whole piece
Auctioneer fighting mad.
IF any one bids again, they will have 10
take the article or get into trouble angrily
throwing down the piece of calico. Give
me something else. Alb | gentlemen. here
is fine piece Of diaper. What can get
fCs thiss What do l hear p anything you
pleased
III start it at fve.' 'Ten,'ssys another
Twelve and half,' says third. sTbir-
teen cries 40 old lady; fourteen = 'ilteenp
says several voices.
Fifteen, am offered fifteen; done a ef
teen can't dwell, going going gone l.
Yours, step up whoever bid.'
No one came mp. All eyes staring in
various parts of the room.
Gone, then, at fourteen. Yours, sir t;
walk up
'Thirtsen. then, madam; you can have it
at your bid.
Il didD't bid; what do you think want
OF that articier said the old lady indig-
nantly.
Here, I'll take it at thirteen exclaimed
voice at the other end of the room. All
eyes were turned in that direction, but no
claimant came forward.
Who says they'll take it ct thir.
Il do said an old farmer, but Pm afraid
i:'s stolen goodsv
Inc auctloneer, now quite mad, spraug
down and was about coll0ring the old man,
when a person right behind cried:
Don't strike him it was that said Won
stole ftp
The auctioneer turned round, " hen big
dog apparently right at his heels, snuffed
and bsrked most furiously. With sudden
spring upon bis counter, he ordered the
crowd to leave. Au acquaintance at our
elbow, no longer able to cantsin himself,
burst into loud laugh, as a gen.ss!. it,
tie man passed out at the door, whom be
told as was Bliss, the rentriloQuist.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
Moral Courage.

Have courage to discharge debt while
you have mOney 10 your pocket.
Have the courage to speak your mind
when it is necessary that you should do so
and hold your tongue when it becomes
necessary for you to do So.
Have the courage to speak to q friend in
"seedy" coat, even though you are in
company with q rich one, and we'll attir.
ed.
Have the courage to own you are Door.
and disarm poverty of its sharpsst sting.
Have the courage to "cut" the most
agreeable acquaintance you have when Won
are convinced that ne lacks principle. A
friend should bear with q friends ipfirm-
iTies, but with yices.
Have courage to show your respect for
honesty. In whatever guise il appears and
your contempt for dishonesty and duplici-
ty, by whomsOever exhibited.
Have the courage to obey your own
conscience, at the risk of being ridiculed
by men.
Have Sbe courage to wear your old
clothes until you can gay for new ones.
Have the courage to wear thick boots in
the winter, and insist upon your wife end
daughters doing the came
Have the courage to prefer comfort and
propriety to fashion, in all things.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
The COn"itIon OF the Coun,rv.

The Washington Constitutional Union,
10 view of the condition Of the country
and the partizan combinations against its
best interests, calls upon the people 10
arouse:
THE meB in power are determined 10
perpetuaIe their rule by fair means or
foul. They have used the Government
army and money to carry the recen. cleo.
tons, ard will do worse if need be 90 con.
troll the coming election for the Presiden.
cy. They care not who suffers 90 thew
have power and place. This cruel war
may last forever. if they are only provided
foF and get rich, the nation, may bleed AZ
every pore. We rePeatfths warning: Les
the people arouse and take the matte IN
their own hands. The ration must be
saved. National clubs should be formed
10 every city, town and village in the
land. We should organize and act in con.
cert ss oEe man, that we may be able "a
overcome the mighty efforts Of our ocun-
try's worst enemies"
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
killing q Paramour.

Joseph Moore, an auctioneer at Johnss
town. Maine, on bis recent return Ton
nine months service in the army, ascera
tanned that bis wife, gay and 'dsshine
young woman. bad had improper 10 timscy
With Jordan Msrbourg, wealthy mer-
chant OF the town. Moore. watched n,
opportunity fs~ mornings since, snd e.
Maroourg passed him BY 10 the street, he
caught him BY the collar, exelaimiBa: a :.
Get down on your knees-I au, going to
kill you Ny wife made clean breast Of
1t last night and immediately drew 70.
vOlver and fred, the FIRST shot taking ef.
feet near tbe heart. He fred three ethsr
shots in quick succession. when Marboure
fell forward and immedistely expired
Moore delivered himself up 70 the authori.
tea
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05

anxious to examine it ourselves by gas
light, ifshe would be 80 good as to show
US around. She protested that they were
honest people, that her husband was out,
the hour was late we were no gentlemen.
and finally that she would thank US to
leave, just as any honest woman would.
Bot l cannot go Into details. Suffice il
to say, we went up stairs, down stairs, and
in the lady's chamber; and wherever we
went we found more goods than the most
thrifty housekeeper could need. Down
stairs especially there was perfect store
of valuabies-enough to stack two or three
variety shops Of moderate pretensions, be-
sides one jewelry store. 10 ths morning
sent to Smith & Co., to come and identify
their property. In course of the next two
days, not only Smith. but 1he fepressnta-
tiyes of dozen oth6f steres which had
been robbed, were there. Smith found
nearly all his silks, many others ideEti~
fed the whole or part of theirs, while
much remained that was not claimed by
any one.
There were more than q dozen taken at
the saloon, most of whom were known
to the police the matter was vigorously
prosecuted, and believe more than half
"oIo NuLJ CVuNICGeu anu eFnIeuCeu III NEW
York.
But what became of my twin brother
Joe, who had unconsciously got his partic.
ular friends into troublef
The conclusion Of the whole matter can
be told briefly.
Joe was Induced to accompany me 40
far as Buffalo on my return home, where
introduced him Co my friend Deputy
Crane, who Immediately escorted him to
the City Hotel with which | had once
made slight acquaintance. Smith & Co.
and tie clerks, recognized him at once and
volunteered to see that he had Justice
Deputy Crane, Smith, Jones and all my
persistent acquaintance of a month before,
begged thousand pardOns for their stu
2idity in thinking resembled the thief
But more acceptable was Smiths check
for the promised reward, aud was more
than willing to forgive Deputy Crane for
it was owing to bis bluDder that much
valuable property was returned to the
rightful owners, many rascals made to suf.
fer the penalty of their crimes. one honest
man handsomely paid Cor locking like a
rogue.-SprinGtfeld Republican.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05

WARS IN A NAME The orderly SER
geaDt was calling she roll.
'Jehossphat Jenkins
'HereP promptly responded Jehosa-
PLAT. .--.-.-
George Washington Squib.' f
Here = in firm voice, replied the hero
ic sauib.
'Ebeneser Mead
No answer.
'Ebenezer Mead. what do you mean BY
standing there, staring me 10 the face,
and nos answering when your naue is
called r said the sargent impstiently.
You didn't call my name, grufly re-
sponded the private.
Isn't your name Ebenezer MsadP
Nary time.'
What is it, theni'
'Eben Mead .Fr-
'Wbst's the diferenceP
A heap
i can't see any, 80.
Nov, sergeant your name is Peter
Yes 81
We'll. would you answer to the name of
Peternezer Wrightf
of course not.' aisa.
A laugh from the company. and after
roll call, . mutual smile between Eben
and Peter, ct the lattsr's expense settled
the matter satisfactorily to ali concern.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
THERE rs NO DEATHI

There is no death The stars 90 down
To rise upon some fairer shore,
And bright in Heavens Jexeled crown
They shine forevermore.
There is no DEATH The dust we tread
Shall change beneath the summer showers
To golden grain or mellow fruit,
Or rainbow-tintea flowers.
The granite rocks disorganize,
To feed the hungry moss they bear;
The forest leaves rink daily life
From out the viewless air.
There is no death The leaves may fall,
followers may fade and pass away
hey only wait, through wintry hours,
- coming of the May.
There is no death An angel form
Walks DER the earth with silent tread,
He bears our loved .kiDss away,
And then we call-them dead"
He leaves our hearts all desOlate--
He plucks our faireSt, sweetest flowers
Transplauted into bliss, they now
Adorn immortal bowers.
The bird-like voice whose joyous tOnes
Made glad this scene Ofsi and strife,
Sings now in everlasting song
Amid the tree Of lifel
And where He sees a smile too bright,
Or hearts too pure for faint and vice,
He bears 1t to that world Of light
To dwell in Paradise.
Born in that undying life,
They leave US but to come again;
With Joy We welcome them--the same,
Except In sin and pain.
And ever near US, though unseen,
The dear, immortal spirits tread,
For all the boundless Universe
Is Hfe-There are no deadi
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05

B~Ths Albany Satesmasl one Of the.
savage type of the Republican psns1Ss,
The proud and nunsroas party which
was Represented in-the Convention at Chi.
has been dissipitated BY the action Of Il.
chosen neaa. The administration therefore
ssandsdn tne anomalous and painfal posi-
. naI'ng no organized political sup-
Po5t outside the circle Of it's own Office.
holders ana retainers-a very noisy but By
10 means controlling fsetien.n :
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
Abolition Humanity.

The POughkeepsis IN. " Telegraph
says there is 50 brute 10 human form" in
that city who recently said:
Il would to God that could live to see
the white male population of the South ex.
terminated, and the females left to me
mercy Of the negroes, that g better race
might people the Southern States"
These are the men who are going TO re.
store the Union with the Sonth. ~ u
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
DENTISTRY.

'@y0 DR. r. b. G H o G H r. ANE
WouLp resPec S1U1I inform ,erI the inhabits:
years. has returned 20 Joliet for the purpose of
making future home, and adopts this method to
inform his friends and the public that he take
the rooms formerly occupied By Carpenter Pierce,
rt'..g.r. OVER BROWNS DRUG STORE,
whore he will be pleased to all who may need
'aH' GLAss DENTAL OPERATIONS.
Those VINO may employ him may he assured that ali
"a Operations will be performed in neat trHsg and
% faithful manner.
Nov o. 1861. n24a
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05

JoB PRIHTIHa

= pa -
'oD Printing ofevsvydsscriptiO VII Ibe nszAy
xpsditiously executedto order on tbsraIterns.
Anassortmento blanks kepteonstsptl, on n, !.
- All orders for Advertising ar Ja,, -rork ~,
oe accompanied by cash, unless some person kuoWI
aoeeomes responsible for the same "a - -
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1864-04-05
Carving.

To be known as dextrous table Rnato.
mist-one competent to disect the fowls of
the all, carve the joints of beasts of the field,
aud slice the fishes Of the sea, with neatness
and dispatch--is to be liable to perform q
heavy amount Of hard labor without any
adequate compensation. Beware, there
fore ifyou are good carver, Of bruitiug
the fact abroad. Let not your pride Of
hand get the better Of your discretion. All
men eat few carve. The csrvers, there
fore, are in some sort the servants Of those
who carve not. The latter are the 'supe,
riOr race who feed and wax fat on warm
meats and sauces, while the former are
condemned to forage on cold sCalps and
CONCEALED graves. The head of the table
is doubtless the place os honor. but We bold
with the .philosop hical Falstaf, that honor
may cost more than it comes to, and with
the shrewd Franklin, that it is possible to
pay too dear for ones whistle. When the
King of Siam-has a bone to pick with one
of his courtiers, he sends him a sacred ele-
plant and the expense of keeping, groom
reg and decorating the noble animal ruins
the obliged party. So when the lady of
the house pays you the compliment of
placing before Won for dissection all her
turkeys. roast pigs, and sirluins, her pro-
fessed admiration of your anatomical skill
is simply q cloak for deliberate act of Op-
preston. To any good carver, whose lot
has been cast among theYerIous tenants
of boarding house, We would say-conceal
your gift, Whisper not to your ueighbor
on the right hand, or on the left, that you
are brilliant operator with the festive
steel Do not even criticize the blunders
OF those ferocious persons who tear the
delicacies of the season to pieces BY main
force. and distribute them 10 shapeies COB
bets to the guests. If you do, the madam
will be sure to take the hint. and insist.
with many fine words, which, as Sanche
Panza truly remarks. butter on parsnips.'
on your taking the chair. Feed in dis.
Greet silence upon viands unskiIfully BAR
celled out, rather than 90 into peual ssrvi
tude a. au expert The conpiaisant gen.
tleman who contents to sit at the head of a
boarding house table, is worse of with re-
gard 80 culinary comforts than the peri
patio pauper who COLLECTS cold vIctuais fu
in the forenoon, and warns them up over
bis cinder fire in the evening. The begger
has warm meal for nothiug-the slave of
the knife and fork pays round price for a
daily ration of leaViDgs, and throws in bis
labor gratiOusly.