Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1864-04-27
What Happened at Our House.

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runnin' in and out, and finally the doctor
he cum. I was in a great hurry myself,
wantin' to hear I hardly knOwed what,
but artsr little while an old granny of
woman as had been very busy about
thar, poked her head into the room where
I was walking about and says:
Mr.. Sporum, it's a GAL
what? says I.
"A gal, says she, and with that she
jerks her head back.
Well, thinks I, I'm the daddy of gal
and begin to feel my keeping nightly
I'd rather it was boy tho, thinks I, for
then he'd feel nearer to me, as how he'd
bear my name and there be less chance
for the Sporums to run out, but consid-
erin everything, gal will do very well.
Jest then old nurse pOkes her head in
again and says:
Another one, Mr.. Sporum-a fine
boy,
Another, says I, that's rather crow
ding things onto feller.
Size laughed and jerked her head back
again.
Well, thinks I, this is no joke sure; at
this lick I'll have family enough to do
me in few years.
Jussthon the old she devil (aIways
shall hate herr poEes her head in and
says, says she:
Another gal! Mr.. .Sporum.'
Another what? saysI.
Another gaI' says she.
Well, says I, go straight and tell
Sal I won't stand it. I don't want EN-,
and I amt goin' to have EN-; does she
think I'm Turk, or a Mormon, that she's
got to have thribbIes?-three at a popl
Why it beats the oldest beastp Docs
she think I'm worth hundred thousand
dollars? that I'm Mr.. Astor or Mr.. Ro-
thschild? that 1 can afford thribbles, and
clothe and feed and school three children
at time? 1 aint goin' to stand it, no
how; 1 did not want EN-, and am not
going to want EN-, now nor no other
time. Haint been a good and dutiful
husband to Sal? Haint I kept in doors
Of night, and quit chewing tobacco and
smoking segars just to please her? Amt
1 bought her all the bonnets and frocks
she wanted? And then for her to 90
and have thribbles! She knowed better.
and hadn't orter done it. didn't think
Sal would serve me such a trick. Have
1 ever done any mean trick, that she
should serve me in this way? and with
that 1 laid down on the settee, and felt
awful bad, and the more I thought about
it the worse I felt
Presently SAILS nanny, old Mis- Jones,
comes in and says:
Peter, come and see what pretty chill
dren you've got
'Childrenp says I, you'd better say
a whole litter. Now Miss Jones, I love
Sal you know, and have tried to make
good husband, but I call this a soaly
trick, and if thar's any law in this coun-
try I'm going to sec if a woman can have
thribbles, and make a man take keer Of
them. I aint going to begin to do it,
says I.
With that she laughed fit to kill her
self, and made all sorts of fun of me and
said any other man would be mighty
proud to be in my shoes. I told her I'd
sell out mighty cheap if anybody wanted
to take my place. Well the upshot of it
was that she persuaded me that I was
wrong, and got me to go into the room
whar the all was.
When I got in Sal looked so loving at
me, and reached out her little hands so
much like a poor, dear little helpless
child, that I forgot everything but my
love for her, and folded her gently up to
my heart like a precious treasure, and felt
like I didn't care if she had two and four
Of them. just then number one set up a
whine like young pup, and all the bal
lance fOHered. Them Mri5BEes knoued
their daddy.
Well, everything was made up, and
Sal promised she would never do it agin;
and since then I have been at work, GER
tain, working all day to make bread for
them thribbs, and busy nursing them at
night. The fact is, if I didn' have a mi
ghty good constitution, I'd had to give in
long ago. Number one has the collie and
wakes up number two, and he wakes up
number three, and so it goes; and me a
flying about all the time trying to keep
them quiet.
So great was the anxiety of the Chinese
authorities to obtain some of the Whit
worth guns which formed in armament of