The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1864-03-16
WHOLE NO. 387.
HumOr OF SOldier.LiEe.

Humor OF soldier.Life.
A soldier, was taken before the magis
trate of Glasgow for playing cards durin;
divine service. The account is thus giver
in an English journal:
Sergeant commanded the soldiers at tn,
church, and when the parson had read tn,
prayers he took the text. Those who hac
bible took it out, but this soldier hac
neither bible nor prayer book but putting
out pack of cards, he spread then ou
before him. He first looked at one caro-
and then another. sergeant Of the compa
ny saw him and said:
"Put up the cards this is no place for
them"
"Never mind that" said Richard.
When the service was over, the consta.
bic took Richard prisoner, and brought
him before the Mayor.
"Well, says the Mayor, "what have you
brought the soldier here for"
"For playing cards in church."
"Well. soldier, what have you to say
for yourself?'
"Much, sir, hope"
VERY good; if not, will punish you
more than ever man was punished.
~ have bcen," said the soldier, "about
six weeks on the march. | have neither
bible nor common prayer book l have
nothing but pack OF cards, and hope to
satisfy your worship Of the purity Of my
Intentions"
Then spreading the cards before the May
or, he began with the ace:
''When see this it reminds me that
there is but one God.
The deuce reminds ME Of Father and
Son.
"The tres reminds me Of Father, Son, and
Holy Ghost.
The four reminds me of the four Evan
gelists-Mathew, Mark, Luke and John.
''The .fse reminds me of the five wise
virgins that trimmed their lamps
"The sic reminds me that in six days
the Lord made Heaven and earth.
1.-The seUen reminds me that on the seventh
day God rested from the great work, and
hallowed it,
1.-The eight reminds me of the eight
righteous persons that were saved when
God destroyed the world, viz: Noah, his
wife, his three sons and their wives.
''The nine reminds me Of the nine lepers
that were cleansed by our Savior. Therc
were nine out Of the ten who never return
ed thanks.
''The ten reminds me of the Ten Com.
mandments which God handed down to
Moses on the tables of stone.
The king reminds me of the Grea,
King of Heaven, which is God Almighty.
"The queen reminds Inc Of the Queen of
Sheba, who visited Solomon, for she was as
wise woman as he was man.
"Well, said the Mayor, "you have given
description Of all the cards in the pack
but one
"What is that?'
"The knave," said the Mayor.
81 vii! give your honor a description of
that too, if you will not be angry"
II will not" said the Mayor, "if you do
not term me to be the knave."
swell, said the soldier, ''the greatest
knave that know of is the constable that
brought me here"
IL do not know" said the Mayor, if he
is the greatest knave, but | know he is the
greatest fool.
"W hen count the number Of cards in
pack, | find there are tifty.two-the num-
Der of weeks in year; and | find four
suits-the number Of weeks in month.
IL find there are twelve picture cards in
pack, representing the number of months
in year; and on counting the tricks, had
thirteen-the number Of weeks in a quar-.
ter.
$50 you see, sir, pack of cards serves
Tor Bible, Almanac, and Common Prayer