, 1864-03-26


"Bimlcech my son" said Mr.. Slow, shak-
ing his head with oracular and owl-like pro-
fundity, 1T is not well to know too much,
my boy; your father never did-he knew
too much for that. Thoughts is perplexing,
and the human mind, Bimleech, is too
precious thing, to be worn out with too
much friction. Don't abuse the gift Of
mater, my son, cause nater's one Of 'em she
is. Don't investigate anything new, my
boy, cause there's thousand old things Of
more conscience to look artcr-the first
which is number one. New notions per-
plexes the mind, dcar-there's full enough
fools in the world who like to look arter
such things, without troublin' your pre-
ciOus head about EN-; 'twouldn't be cent
of benefit to you.
"Call 'em all humbug and moonshines.
and them as believes 'em all lunatics aud
scoundrcls, and that will save you many
discussions, and give you q dignity, and
prudent folks make money. Philosophy
and scions and them things is humbugs and
everything is humbug but money. Mind
l tell ye." Mr.. Slow ceased, overcome by
his own eloquence.
The editor Of Norfolk paper, in looking
over some musty records Of Virginia, came
across the following:
"At Grand Assemblage held in James
Cittie in the yeer of our Lord, 1916, were
passed mamie ackts to the glorie of Al
mighty God, and publique goodc of this
his Majestie's Colonie;" )" among which is
act V. (with amended biography:) "WO-
men causing scandalous suits to be ducked."
Whereas, oftentimss many babbling women
often slander and scandalize their neighbors,
for which their poor husbands are often
brought into chargeable and vexatious law
suits, and cast in great damages. Be itthere-
fore enacted by the authority aforesaid, That
in actions of SANDER occasioned by the wife
as aforesaid, after Judgment found for the
damages, the women shall be punished by
duckingl And if the slander be SO cnor-
nous to be adjudged greater damage than
FIVE hundred pounds Of tobacco, then the
on"o e. [ a.ah e.. u h"nSsod %,a~ no,rds a - % :"
Saaoo 49, ~ - a. sJ;nj,"d ."";u.. ~ | S"sS.ni e
Sa ros;,Ss ~ ~ I nus ~ a'; Smn n,n".aS ~. ~
Nv 'I.~'' 1, :" P-' '-' A''0
The Confederate girls carried things with
o high hand when the rebellion first broke
out. The Nashville Union says young
men were persuaded, dragged, and actually
kissed and hooted into the rebel army.
The beautiful young mistress curled her
lip in scorn, and turned baughtily away
from her most favored suitor, If he hesi-
lated to fight against his country. Hun
dreds Of the most talented and accomplished
Dulses were Er tbe linton .rcmhied s,r .
,,oment beeare tb;s tenne,, os ssmsio Enrv
lie asnen leaves in m eon;noct;aI eals
and then bowiny their heads bofore tbe
pressure. went awav sorrowfnllv h trc.son
and 10 death. Not tho Syrens of The Gre.
cian seas sang more treacherously to the
mariners, than thousands OF
the daughters OF Tennessee sang to the
young men q the state to their friends,
oro'ncrs' anu lovers. u
The man who navs tho ,.roo,. ,,.rson,l
tax in New York city lives in the same
house in which he kept store for some
fifty years he washes himself in tin pan
in the back yard, whenever he docs wash
,;.,,s go c,od ,.h;ah o' ,..s anu 80 ots ~ Da
nrsraros , for Nm II. % soiIs ~ ~ S aoods dO1. :.
prescnt brt MAJ II HE ,u vast vsaith % % Ss;lv ~
BY lending money on good security, being
just as shrewd, keen, and close, as he ever
was, though he is much beyond seventy
years OF age Aias iOr the poverty OF
flcncs'
An Ind;an.nol;s od;,or .,,snI;,o ch,,ch
last Sabbath, for the first time in many
years, stopped at the entrance, and looking
in vain for the bell-pull, deliberately knocked
y ,ne aOor, ana PoliIely waited until some
Oouy 'Peneu u a"u ic' nun ih'
The following laconic eepistlc may be seen
IN tne window OF a London coiiee-shop:
and saucer. he set bs;n% now ;ncomnio.a
he tliscf NAV have the remainder al 4 bar'
gain."
DR. Franklin obscrvos "a Tbo oros oc|
others are the eyes that ruin US. II all but
myself were blind, ! should neither want fnc
sN~hV &.