The Hancock Jeffersonian. [volume] (Findlay, Ohio) 1857-1870, 1864-03-25
6aafufh 9sttfrsonian.
Local and Miscellaneous.
Mr.. Na,by o,dnins u Mis.i,usry.

Last Sundy we he'd an improvin
'seezu. Robbcrt Tocms Punt who
hcz bin q studyin fer the ministry
with me fer the past 4 weeks, wuz
licenst and ordand. He il a yooth
'uv much promise. He votid twist
fer Bool annon, and only IL yeres old,
swarm his votes In with coolnis and
eese that eggscitid the admiroshen
NV the patriarks at the biznis. | kin
safely say That he hez whald imoar
AbESh nists, bustid moar Methodist i
Brsthrin and uthcr hetrodox church
o. than any Dimocrat NV his age in
the stait. He hez brilyunt- fucher.
After the usual qwestions. wuz put
2 him and satisfactorily anserd, the
.cougregashen wuz dismist, and in the
presents nv the elders and dekuns
alone, I delivered the follerin
1A cHAReE. ~ 'I
Brotier---Hevin bin reglerly or
,daned, it only remanes fer me to Civ
VOC q werd nv council. Yoo air a
goin in2 the aposscl biznis at a ray.
ther unfavrable time. Man wich is
born NV woman hez trubble fer his
linheritanse--I've he'd so much Nv it
that ef I bed it to do over agin l
woodent be born ut all.
The politikle hevins is orecast with
poretsnshus clowds. The litenin Nv
wrath is leapin frum wun to anuther,
whist the thunder wich wuz wunst at
q distcncc, now rores angrily in our
GERS. (Grafc ritin. The ole ship
Dimocrisy is tossin madly onto the
wild waivs, with nary a sale set, her
seems open, the water, IA furrin ele
ment to her insides rushin in. The
stiddiest part Nv her crew hev seed
the botes and ab1ndond her, and the
rest NV EN- er fitin fer the helum.
In the menetime the ole ship is
dashiu past the haven NV Success, and
10 hedin strate fer the rox NV De
str1cshen To yoo is cntrustid q
part NV the work Nv sayip her. Let
me entrect 700 fg-
I. Avoid the soljers. With them
VOC hev nothin in common. They
win despitefully use yoo. Wunst
Q party uv en- maid me drink a pint
wv watsr and talk the oath NV ale
jinse. wich outragis wuz follerd by
conjsstion u, the BOWLS and inham
shen NV the brane.
9. Alluz preech agin the Niger.
It's soothin to ginooine, constoosh-
mel, suthcrn. rites dimocrat, to be con-
stantly told that ther is race nv
men meaner than he is. Besides it
safe--the nigger hez no vote. Ef he
he'd, we might vary.
8. Alluz hev marter. The stait
rites dimocrisy alluz simpathyzc witt
mai that's in basteels fer simpathi
sin with the sowth, fer nun NV ell
know how soon their turn may KUN
4. Preech agin amalgamashen Il
leest A sundays per munth. A MAJ
NV straw that 700 set up yerself il
the eesiest nockt down, pertikelerl,
il yoe set him up with a view N
nockin NV him down.
5. Alluz diloot yoor whisky fe
new converts. 1t talks much to con
vert Ablishnist, and ef 700 use til
pure artikkle it wood kill ordnar,
eonstooshn afore he'd hev time T.
vote, wich wood be aggcrvatin.
6. Sarch the skripters fathefill
for sech passagis ez cassid be Kama
scrvanee obey yoor masters andsich
7. Lern to rede, or ut leest git tn
shaip nv. the letters so fxt in 700
mind that when yoo qwote frum
book er noosepaper, you will hold
rite side up. Eddicashen hez bin
crate help 2 me.
48 Lern to spell and pronowne
Missenegennenashun. Its a goo
word.
The CRATE ledin ices Nv our sci
wich il is yOor dooty to inkulkait
these: The Niger s ape, Linkin
goriiler, JEFF Davis a ehrischen geI
tleman, the rebellyun struggle, f'
rites. the soDer buddy tool, Be
butler beest, ct settry. Yoo a
never 2 bleeve in Bedral yictrys, b
must alluz credit confedrit successe
woodent advise yoo to let yoor fai
in the Confedrisy go so fur as to ia
their skrip on yer salary, neeth
ywoodd burn greenbax. l hev du
go, my bruthsr. Let yer poler ST
be Dimocrisy, yer 'rallyin cry, "rf
Yoenyun ez it wuz--the Constoosl
az II Ia 70 wich tx latitoodimus, fiite ii