Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1864-04-15
Another Yankee Trick.

he sat upon the corn-field fence, medita,
ting on the course of his true love, tina
il was running just as Shakespeare said
did, roughly. III Suke Peabody ha
taken the shine to that gawky, lon
sneaked, stammerin', SLY critter, Gasset
just acose he is city feller, she ain'l th
gal took her for, sartin. No! it's th,
old folks; darn their ugly pictures Ok
Mrs, Peabody alters was a highfalutii
critter, full of big notions. And the oil,
mans regular softhead, driven about b,
his wife just as our old one eyed rooste
'e dTivAn ahnnt hy our cantak erous, fy.
toed Dorkin hen. But if ! don't spilt
this fun, my name amt Jonathan. I'm
going to the city next week by the rail-
road, and when l come back, wake
snakes that's ALL
The above soliloquy may serve to give
the reader one slight idea of the land, in
the pleasant, rustic village where the
speaker resides.
Mr.. jonathan Doubkins was a young
farmer, well to do in the world, and
looking out for wife, aud had been
paying his address to Miss Susan Pea
body, an only daughter Of Deacon El,
derbury Peabody, of that ilk, with fair
prospect of success, when city acquaint-
ance of the Peabody's, one Mr.. Corneli>
US Gasset, who kept retail dry goods
store in Hanover street, Boston, sudden
ly made his appearance in the field, and
commenced cutting out the game. Daz-
zled with the prospect of becoming a
gentleman's wife, and pestered by the
opportunities of her aspiring mama, the
village beauty begun to waver, when
her old lover determined upon last and
bold stroke to foil his rival. He went to
the city and returned of his business be
said nothing, not even to the pumping
maiden aunt, who kept house for him.
He went not near the Peabody's but Ia
bored away in the corn field, patiently
awaiting the result of his Vaccinations.
The next day Mr.. Gasset was seated
with the old folks and their daughter, in
the best room of the Peabody's mansion,
chattering as pleasantly as may be, when
The door opened and in rushed very
dirty and furious Irish woman.
Is it there ye are, Mr.. Cornelius
Gasset Come out of that before !
fetch ye, ye spalpeen Is it that ye
promised me before the priest, ye hathen
nager! Runnin' away from me and the
children-forsakin' your lawful welded
wife, and runnin' after Yankee girls, ye
confidential vaga-'
Woman, there must be some mistake
here stammered Mr.. Gasset, taken all
abaek by the charge.
Devil bit of mistake, ye sarpint
Oh ! wirra warra was it for the likes
1f ye that | sacked little Dennis Nc
Carthy-who loved the ground trod
on, and all because you promised 10 make
4 lady of me--ye dirty thief of the
worruld? Win ye come along to the
railroad station where left little Patrick,
because he was too sick wild the small
,ox to come any furder, or will ye wait
i'll drag ye ?
'Go-go-along,' gasped Gasset.
so and III follow you.'
He thought it best to temperate.
Il give you tin minutes, said the vir-
go; if ye amt there, its me cousin, Mr..
Thaddy Mulgruddory, will be after ye,
&c thafe
And away went the unbidden guest.
Mr.. Gasset was engaged in stammer-
ng out denial of all knowledge of the |
irago, when the psrlor door again open
d, black eyed, Ratchet faced woman,
D fashy silk gown, and a cap of many
ibbons perched ON the top of her head,
lvaded the sanctity of the parlor.
rs he here? p she cried, in a decided
french accent. Then she added, with
scream, 'Ah mon dieu, lie viola Zere
6 is. Traitorl monsterl Vat for you
un away from me2 Dis two, tree years
nevair see you-never, and my heart
roke very bad entirely
who are you! cried Gasset, his eyes
rained out of his head, and shivering
ON head to foot.
lie ask me who am? Oh, ye var
sspectable gentlehommen hear what
e ask Who am, perfde Ah 1 am
our wife
Il never saw you before-so help me
iod, cried Gasset. energetically.
Don't you swear said old Deacon
'eabody. If you do I'll kick you into
is. 1 won't have no proiane or vulgar
in my house
'Oh bless you respectable old man
II him he must come viz me-tell him L
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