The Portland daily press., 1864-12-15
POETRY
From tas BOstoa Evsnsng Transcript.
wanted-A Minister. ~


We have been without pastor
Some eighteen months or more,
And though candidates are plenty
We've had at least score,
All Of them 'tip-top'i preachers,
o 20 their lett rs ram
We're just as far as ever
From settling on the man.
The first who came amongst US Lfa
By no means was the worst,
But then we didn't think Of him
Because he wGs the first; arn
II being quite the custom r--
To sacrifice few
Before the church in earnest
Determines what to do.
There was a smart young fellow,
With serious, earnest way .
Who, but for one great Dlunder,
Had surely won the Gay
Who left so good impression,
On Monday one or two
Went round among The people
To see II he would do. M 4as
The pious, cody portion, re
Had not fault TO find;
His clear and searching preaching
They thought the very kind;
And all went smooth and pleas mt
Until they heard the views
OF some influential sinners,
Who reht the highest pews.
On these his pungent dealing
Made but sorry hit;
The coat Of gospel teaching
Wasquie too tight 1T. tts .i
OF course his fate was settled
Attend We parsons all!
And preach please the sinners,
Ii you would get a call. = -l-f 81 r u e
Next came spruce young dandy,
Who wore his hair too long;
Another's Goa was shabby,
And his voice not over sDonS'
And one New Haven student
Yves worse than 8 4 Of tnoSe
We couldn't hear the sernon'
10. thinking Of his nose
Tt.,, ,,earvtue Of candidates, M tNi4
I'VE looked the country through,
mid doctors and profess rs,
To Dad one that won do. ~ t-.a.
And after much discussion
On who shOu d bear the ark,
With. toerable agreements,
We fixed on DR.. PaIke. "a lst E
Here then we thought it settled,
But were amazed to find 49, soz ar
!. Our dattsriug invitan n t5y 8f wv
Respectfully declined -,r-
We turned to DIR Hopkins -R
To help us in the lurch,
Who strange thought that College o3
Had claims above our church."
Next We dispatched committees.
BY twos aud threes, to urge
The labors for a Sabb th
OF the Rev. Shallow SpiurRe
lie came--a marked sensation
ED 10 wonderful his style.l 4nN
Followed the creaking Of his boots
As be passed along the aisle. -.sA ftss
..ifs-ll llssat . = .tasl e JqinN
His tones were so affecting,
His .gestuf es 80 divine -F-rs-r 7.l-3g s
A lady tainted In the hymn, va y ~ as
Before the second line:
And ON that day he gave us, .-,e g n -..-r- q
81 In accents clear and loud.
The greatest prayer eer addressed
To an enlightened crowd.
: He preached q double sermon, 't54 y ~ a
Aud gave us angels food
On such q lovely Topic -
"The joys Of solitude =. 81 s4 l1 VI y lA11 =
All full Of sweet descriptions,
OF flowers, and pearly streams, Fcafgi {
OF xarb ing birds and moonlit groves, hA
And go lden sunset beams.
OF faith, and true repentance
He nothing had TO say; i
He rounded all the corners,
And rmoothed the rugged way;
Ma aged with great adroitness s7 casI ez'
To entertain and p ease, STi4 naii5a Il
And leave the sinners conscience lae ii as
Complete at Its ease. lasgla
Six hundred is the salary rrr.-.lr
We gave IN former days
We thought livery liberal
And found IL hard to raise; 81 4of aJfE
But when We took the paper. egAl .au8lH
We had no need 10 urge, v8 siai
To raise a cool two thousand
For theRev. Shallow Spiurge y l6.st
In vain were all our Efforts
We had no chance at all
We found then city churches Fs5
Had given him call; - F
And he, in prayerful waitir q, "a
Mas keeping all In town.
But where they bid the highest ..'.I 7. a
Twas whispered hewouId go. G1
And now, good Christian brothers
Ne ask your earnest pray ers.
That God would send q Shepherd az -
To guide our church affairs,
With this clear understanding,
man to meet our views
Must preach TO please the Sinners - 81 q
And fill the vacant p ws.