Lewistown gazette. [volume] (Lewistown, Pa.) 1843-1944, 1864-06-01
MISCELLANEOUS,
ARTEMUS WARD ON THE PREST,
DENCY.


ler porshun of the rebs' Nuthern frens
air in fayur of George b LittleMackl
fer the next Cheef Magistrate. make no
dowt his frens think he wood make a swete
Pres. Ackordin tn THAR idee ov things,
he wood sweet Tha think j Davce
makes a tipptopp Pres. As President
Geo. woodent irritate his Suthern bruthern
much. Skarcely But doant believe fur
emmy length owe moments that Mack wood
make the best Pres the world ever saw.
On the contrary, | think he wood make
the wust-tho it wood be pretty difficult to
make wuster than j. Buckannen Geo.
B. woodent du fur Uuion Pres He hath
his faults. Ef he was nommynated for
Grave Digger. or boss in Iron Oar quar-
rles, L wooden say neigh As digger,
he's large, ! mite say he's immense. As
Cheef Magistrate Ct the u. S. he'd be
skaky. Rather. Afore he ockupied the
cheer long he'd hev Washinytun sity dug
up an lokated at Hoboken, n. Jarsy
Maybe he'd send mitteus to the bare hand
ed shivelry, afore tey battled with the
mudsills ov the North. Praps I'm rether
heyvy on Geo. Onct embossed him |
kalled him Pennselvany's sun. dident
stop to enquire wether he was AboltiCnist,
opperheadishinest, elyishionist, or j.
g Bennetishionest, Gooist or Jentlist, SO
he wood skrush the Rebs as he promist to
do-push' EN- to the wall as he sed he'd do
Wen George he'd kommand of the Poto-
mick OF the Army, he used ia maik STRAIT
ergick movmentS toards Richmond, an i'm
mejitly fnde hisselt in Washington. Now
ef he makes stratergick muvement toards
Washington he will find hiSseIl-sum uther
plase-praps he'd retreet tn Salt river
| doant think klenment Valanpigham
wood maik sootable Pres fer the North
KLEIN has his little falts, 2 He's iOrri.
.ner. He's Sumpthin else Iikewisely; [
wosnt say what, but the fust letter sounds
like Trater. An that's what aileth him
He was elected to rename in Kanada few
years. Them few years is not up. Klein
wood SCOT the Suthern and Northern Rebs
z L, but ary Il man wot has hunk OF
patrltsm In his buzzem as big az Copper
hed's sole, wood PREFER he continued being
furrincr.
Praps Mr.. Tout Boorygard wood fill the
Pea 1T eny-prise party. air free 2 con-
fesS that Tout wood fill the Presdentshul
cheer with as much advantage to the North
as eny other Copperhead, but he's not the
pippln or squinch Of the undersigned S
eye. Hardly. He, ?, hath bis falts. Like
them fust named, he sympathlses with the
South
Thare IL other candydates named by the
Peas Party. Shoodent wunder eff they
had hankering arter j. Buckanen again.
Wen j. B. was President, he MKT things
up sopcrbly. Eff it hadcnt been fer
Jeems an his festiV party, we coodent now
boast OF war; we cOodent boast Of pawn
75 cents pound for butter, an other things
in proportion; we c0odent bOast-we Good
ent-we-ue co0dent boast! Good we!
But Jeems woodent be lected learn he
was run for constable anG was detected
Perchans the n. i. Peas men will bring
out Mister Emma Webb for the posish
She might make lnveIy Pres in l cents
but not in another She luvs the -shiverY
not too wisely, but too well. She has Other
falts. She doant ware the rite kind ov
Close. K. Webb is out OF her spere; it is il
the sunny Sowth Fer the benefit o,
thuze readers which hasent herd ov Emma
| will state that she air femai W ho max e.
stnmpp speechis occasionally fer j. Davice
l bet il she ever gifts hust ind heel he'
to fly around
The Union party air also naming thai
candydates John Charles Fremont i
limited at. Jouney is hunky boy, but h'
has kuple of falts. The lst is, his tim,
has not kun. The I'd, he woodent bC
lected. This larst falt is jest what ails me
| think your humble sarvint Good run for
Pres without Citing lected, as eesy as th
next man, or eny uther man. Those hot
beaded chappys oil over the country VIII
air usin Johns name had better refrane
They should take B. Frank Scott's advise
an put ''money in thar purse" But
think Jack Fremonte is sensible, moril
uprlte chap, there4 oplne he wont lea
his name for to be used in those manner
He must bide his time
Sec Chase has also been pushed forrard
Salmon wood make caloushus President
thar's no vase about it But he has hi
talts, 2. is he woaDta cksept, Another
he makes good Seckretary. .Them's no
the worst fslts he ken hev. Not envy
AS secky has declined the uomina, h whicl
was want to be thrust upon him by sun
persons, [ say Bully for him The Cop
beslime Salmon for circulating greenbaz
| hev but one objection to him in thos
particular is, he cirkulates too fe,
ov em in the imejiate vicinity of A. w
Jr's pockit. Eff the boges demos don
think theys luvly, let em emmagrate to tn
Suthrin Contheveracy, an locate anon
their trends, whar shinplasters. air as plent
as Bishop Polkbsrries, an about as wott