Weekly Trinity journal. [volume] (Weaverville, Calif.) 1857-1972, 1864-07-30
A Noisy Couple.


had an aunt coming to visit me for the first
time since my marriage, and don't know what
evil genius prompted the wickedness which
perpetrated towards my wife and ancient rela-
tive.
"My DEAR" said to my wife, on the day be-
fore my aunt's arrival, "you know aunt Mary
is coming tomorrow we'll, | forgot to mention
rather annoying circumstance with regard to
her. She's very deaf-and although she can
hear my voice, to which she is accustomed in its
ordinary tones, yet you will be obliged to speak
extreme loud in order to be heard. 1t will be
rather inconvenient, but | know you will do
everything in your power to make her stay agree
able'
then went to John r, who loves joke
about as well as any person know of, told him
to be at my house at six o clock on the following
evening, and felt comparatively happy.
went to the railroad depot with a carriage
next night, and when was on my way home
with my aunt, | said
"My dear aunt, there is one rather annoying
infrmity that Anna (my wife, has, which | for
got to melton before. She's very deaf, and al
though she can hear my voice, to which she is
accustomed in its ordinary tones, yet you will
be obliged to speak extremely loud in order to
be heard. am very sorry she is so.'
Aunt Mary, in the goodness of her heart pro-
teeted that she rather liked speaking loud and to
do so would give her great pleasure.
The carriage drove up on the steps was my
wife-in the window John r, with a
face utterly solemn as if he had buried all his
friends that afternoon
handed out my aunt, and she assembled the
steps
q am delighted to see you," shreked my
wife, and the policeman on the opposite side
walk started and my aunt nearly fell down the
steps
" Kiss me my DEAR" howled my aunt and
the hall lamp clattered and the window shook
as with the fever and ague. looked at the
window-John had disappeared. Human nature
could stand it no longer / poked my head into
the carriage and went into strong conulsions.
When l went into the parlor my wife was
helping Aunt Mary to take off her hat and cape !;
and there sat John with his long face of woe.
Suddenly, 4" Did you have a pleasant jour
ney ?" went off my wife like pistol, and John
nearly jumped to his feet.
Rather dusty was the response, in war
whoop, and so the conversation continued.
The neighbors for blocks around must have
heard it. When was in the third story heard
every word of it.
In the course of the evening my aunt took
occasion to say to me
q How loud your wife speaks-don't it hurt
her?'
told her ali deaf persons talked loudly, and
that my wife being used to it, was not affected
ny the eAeTClOn, anu tudL Aunt MARY was getting
along finely with her.
Presently my wife said, softly
Alf, how very loud your aunt talks -
q Yes" said |, % all deaf persons do. You re
getting along nicely she hears every word you
say" And | rather think she did
Elated by their success at being understood
they went at it hammer and tongs, till everything
on the mantle-pece clattered again, and was
seriously afraid of crowd gathering in front of
the house.
But the end was near. My aunt being of an
investigating turn of mind, was DESTROYS of find
ing out whether the exerton of talking so loud
was not injurious to my wife.
60 Doesn't talking so loud strain your lungs ~
said she, in unearthly boot for her voice
not musical it was when she was
young.
I" 1t is an exertion," shrieked my wife,
" Then why do you do it p was the answer
ing scream.
@ Because-because- can't hear if l
don't" squalled my wife.
I" What p my aunt fairly rivaling railroad
whistle this time.
began to think it time to evacuate the prem
ises and looking around and seeing John gone
stepped into the parlor, and there he lay, fat
on his back, rolling from side to side, with his
fists in his ribs, and most agOnized expression
of countenance, but not uttering sound.
Immediately and Involuntary assumed a SINH
lar attitude, and think that from the relative
position of our boots and heads, and attempt to
restrain our laughter, apoplexy must have inev-
itahly ensued, if horrible groan which John
gave vent to in his endeavor to suppress his
visibility had not betrayed our hiding place.
In rushed my wife and my aunt, who by this
this time comprehended the joke and such a
scolding as | then got l never got before, and
hope never to get again.
know not what the end would have been if
John in his endeavors to appear respectful and
sympathetic, had not given vent to such dia-
bolical noise, something between a groan and a
horse laugh, that all gravity was upset, and we
screamed in concert.