Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1862-1865, 1864-03-02
MORE OF LINCoLNs JOKES AND STORIES.
TWO IysrANoRj WHKaE TIE PRRsIDsNT WAS NOT RE
MINDED ~ A story

TWO INSTANCES WHKaE THE PRECEDENT WAS NOT RE-
MINDED STORY
The President is naturally enough good deal ban
tered about bis habit Of storytelling.
Dr. Hovey, Of Dansville N. Y, called at the White
House anAfouad the occupant horseback, ready for
a ride Be approached and taid-"P President Lincoln,
thOuhha would call and you before leaving the
CIV and hear you tell story" The President Greeted
Lin pleasantly and asked where be was from. The re-
uly was "From Western New York" swell thG!s a
good enough country without stores replied me fres-
ident, ard on he rode
Some moral Philosopher was tell ng tie President one
day about the undercurrent Of public opinion. He went
on TO explain it at length and drew en- ilu taiion from
the Mediterranean q. The current seemed very curi-
uly t, flow Ia both from the Black Se snd the Alan.
,ic oeeau: bui 4 shrewd Yankee, by means Of con-
ryance Of ais bai discovered that a. the outlet
re Atlantic only about thuT feet OF the surface water
a,ved inward while there treme dous curr IL {
unier that flowing out "Well" said Mr.. Ii COLI, much
bored "tbat dent remind Of any story .Ver heard
of.n The philosopher desplired OF making serious
impression by his argument, aud lett.
uouIsrTIvEHEss NoEPLUssKD.
Mr. Lincoln has very effective way sometimes Of
dealing with men who trouble him with QUESTIONS
Somebody asked him how many men the rebels had In
the field He replied very seriously Twelve hundred
thousand according to the best authority The inter.
roRator blanched in the face and iculted, my God
'Yes, sir; twelve hundred thousand-no doubt OF IT,
y
saw the enemy outnumbers them from three or hVe TO
one aud / must believe them. We have four hundred
thou and men in the ID aud three times four make
twelve. Don't you see it y The iDqustive man look
ed for his hat soon after "seeing it."
When the Sherman expedition which captured Port
oval was fitting cut there great curiosity to learn
where it had gone. person visiting the chief mag B.
t,ate at the White House, importuned MIN 10 dscloee
the de stination TO him. "Wil you keep 1t entirely
secretf" asked the President. oh, yes, upon my
honor" "Well," said the President, I'll tell you -
Assuming an air OF great mystery, and drawing tho
man oIoee 10 him. be kept him moment awaiting the
revelation with an open mouth and great anxiety
"WeIn said he in loud whisper, which was heard al
over the room, "the expedition has gone to-sesl"
When General Banks fitting out bis expedition 10
New Orleans IL will be remembered that he Used to
answer all auctions as his destination with great
fraukness, by s,ying that it was going South.
A STORY ron Mr.. BATS.
Ooe day when Mr.. Bates was demonstrating with Mr..
Lincoln against the appointment of some indifferent
LAWYER TO place of judicial importance, the President
in,erposed WITH "COme, now, Bates he's not hait 30
had AZ YOU think. Besides that must tell you, he
did me good turn long ago. When TOOK 70 the law,
/ was going to court one morning, with some Ten or
twelve miles of bad road before me, and nad No morse
The Judge overlook me in bis wsgon. Hello, Lincoln,
are YOU not going to the court housef Come In, and
Pll give YOU seat Well, got 10, and the Judge
vent ON reading his papers. Presently the wagon
s,nck attn mn on one side of the road then Il hoped
off 10 the other looked out and saw the driver was
Jerking from aide to side in his seat; so, says judge
,hnR your coachman has been taking lit lie drop tee
much this morning well, declare, Luooln, sad hs
II should not much wonder if you right for De mas
near ly upset me half dozen times starting So
nuttinR his head out Of the window, he shouted
Won internal scoundrel you are drunkl upon WHICH,
pulling up his horses, ahd turning round with great
gravity, The coaehman said BY CORA that's tue nf''