Litchfield enquirer., 1864-03-03
ently the wagon struck stump on one side of


 the road then it hopped of to tho other. I looked out, and saw the driver was jerking from side to side in his Seat, 50, says l. Judge think your coachmaA has been taking little drsp too much this morning. Well, I de- clare, Liscsln,' said he, should not much wonder if you arc right. foe hs has nearly up- sst me half dozen times siace startiug.' So, pattiss his head cat of the window. he shoated. Why, you iatssnal seounarsl, you are drunk 7 Upon which. pulliag up his horses. and turning round wish great gravity, the eoachnaa said By gorrs that's the first rishtfsl decision you have given fer tho last twelvemonth !',.<
 A FEW MORE LITTLE sroRIHs.
 A gentlemar Was telling at theaW hite House how friend of his had been driven away from New Orleans as a Unionist, and how, on his expulsion. when hs asked to see the writ Ly which he was ex xpelled, the deputation which called on him told him that the government had made up their minds to do nothing illegal ard 30 they had issued ns illegal vrts aud simply meant to make him go of As own fre, will. Well, said Mir. Lincoln, that re inds me of hotel-keepsr down at St. Louis, who boastsd that he never had death iu his ho- tel, for whenever guest was dying in his house he carried him out to die in the street.
 A man from New York tells of all interview he had with tue President. How are you, , said he. l saw your card, but did not see you. was glad, however, that you carded me, and was reminded of an anecdote of Mr. WAittlesey. When Mr. Cox, then young man, first came here, Nr. Nhttlesey said to him Sir have you carded the senators ? No, Sir ; l thought would curry favor first, and then comb them.' It is no joking mat ter, sir,' said Mr. Whittlesey, seriously. It is your duty to card the senators, sir and it'is customary, believe, to card the cabinet also, and you ought to do it, sir. But,' he added, after moments thought, I think lam wrong; the cabinet'may card you.'
 One of the new lsviss of troops required the appointment of large additional number of brigadier and major-gensrals. The applications and recommendations accordingly poured in in innense numbers. They were carried to tie President for examination, by ths bushel bas- kstful. Mr. Liucoln.came upon one wherein the claims of a certain worthy (not in the service at all) for gsneralship' were gowingy set forth. But the applicant didn't specify whvth; CT he wantsd to be brigadier or mnjur general. The President observed this difficulty, and solved it by d lucid endorsement. TLe clerk, on receiving the paper again. found written across its back, Mujor-Geueral, I reckon. A. Lincoln"
 CONCERNING THR PRESIDENT PERSONALLY.
 Some one was smoking in the presence of the President and complimented him on hav' ing no vices. neither drinking nor smoking. That is doubtful compliment" answered the President "I recollect once being out . dc stage in Illinois and man sitting by ma offered me a segar, told him I had no vices. He said nothing, smoked for some time, and then glunted out, its my experi- euce that colks who have no vices have plagued few virtues"
 The President is rather vain of his height, but one day young maa called on him who was certainly three inches taller than the for 4er; he was like the mathematical definition of the straight line-length without breadth. " Really" said Mr. Lincoln, l must look up to you; if you ever get ia . deep place you ought to be able to wade cut" That reminds us of the story told of Ar. Lincoln somewhere when crowd called him out. He came out on the balcony with his wife who was some- what below medium height) and made the fol- lowing brief remarks :" Here l am, and here is Mrs. Lincoln. That's the long and short of it.
 TWO INSTANCES WHERE THE PRESIDENT WAS NOT
 REMINDED or STORY,
 The President is naturally enough a good deal bantered about his habit of storytelling.
 Dr. Hovey, of Danville, N. Y, called at the White House and found the occupant On horse back, ready for a ride. He approached and said " President Lincoln, thought l would call and see you before leaving the city, and hear you tell story" The President greeted bim pleasantly, and asked where he was from. The reply was '" From Western New York" { We'll, that's good enough country without stories." replied the President, and otf he rode.
 Some moral philosopher was telling the President one day about the undercurrent of public opinion. He went on to explain it at length, and drew an illustration from the Med ;terranean Sea. The current seemed very GU. riously to flow in both from the Black Sea and the Atlantic Ocean, but shrewd Yankee, by means of a contrvance Of floats. had discov- cred that at the outlst into the Atlantic, only about thirty feet of the surface water flowed inward, while there was tremendous current under that flowing out. ;" Well,''f. said Mr. Lincoln, much bored, |" that don't remind me of any story ever heard of:'' The philoso- pher dsspaired of making serious impress