The Potter journal. [volume] (Coudersport, Pa.) 1857-1872, 1864-08-31
TERMS $3.50 PER AMNUM.
Brick POfnerOy's Cold.
THE SPIRAL "MOVEMENT CURE

the lane, 1t were grave question whether
/ 1t were best to retrace or trace ahead. 1t
was our cold. caught It ever so easy.
The fire went out The lamp flikered low.
The kitchen clock tolled the death of the
day as l told the girl that | loved her
The clock struck as the idea suruck me I
was getting cold told the girl SO We
sot on the sofa Said she, "Sit up closer"
Ia her lap We laid eur head Who cared
for little cold. We talked lots. We
talked low, because We were down stairs.
caught the codr but not the girl. Then
| went to doctor Of physic; SO I meta
physic How do you like that joke p
lie felt of my tongue and looked at my
pulse said [ vas sick. Told me to 60
home, soak my feet, cover up in bed, eat
nothing for week, and be we'll Gave
him five dollars and saw my landlord.
He said no deductions could be made on
board, SO couldn't follow the physics
advice. Then saw another doctor. He
told me to take two bottles of hot drops,
bed-blanket covered with mustard, and
90 to bed. Told him | didn't want hot
drop till dropped forever. Told him I
didn't want to bo mustered in that way.
Told him didDt want to 90 to bed. Then
| saw another knight of the Scalpel. It
was the same night that saw him, tho.
lie totd me to take cod liver oil and hon
ey. Told him | had no cod liver. Then
he said must eat cold tallow. Said |,
THAT never agrees with me" Then he
told me to eat fat beef Thought him a
humbug, and went elsewhere Thoughe
I'd try the cold water plan Eminent
hydrantopathist told me 10 soak my head
in water; soak my feet in ice water;
sit ia a barrel of ice-water two hoars
bathe my back in Ice, water eat pounded
ice till | sweat, and I'd feel better. Good
way to get up sweat, but then it would
have spoiled skating pond to have
done it,
Another doctor told me to Use dumb
bells. Supposlng he meant deaf aud
dumb girl, declined
Another Esculapias told me the Home
pathist style was all the rage Gave ne
five thousand little pills marked 4. Gave
NE FIVE thousand more little pills. marked
B. Gave me five thousond more little
pills, marked @. Tod ne take one pill
in pail Of water every Eve MINUTES to
take another pill in two pals of water
every four inmates. Told me to take
half Of another pill in FIVE pals of water
every two minutes. Took two pills aud
went to the river. Hired BOY to dip
up and pogr down. Emptied the river
in ten minutes, Changed my base to
young lake and went at it again. Cold
didn't improve, that is, the cold didn't
improve nc. Went home mad Gave
I4,O00 pills 70 chap who pilfercd chick
ems from the barn. lie still lives
Another doctor told ne to take calomel
Another told me to drink hot whskey.
How do you ike that Two good doc
tors. Glad meta physic in such spirits.
Sent two barrels of whiskey to my room.
First tired q pint of hot whiskey. 1t
loOsaned my eyes. Then I tried a pint
of cold whiskey. 1t fixed them all right
Then I moved with great vigilance upon
piat Of hot whiskey. 1t loosened my
legs. Them threw my left flank around
pint Of cold Wbiskey. Felt better Then
| tried some hot whiskey. Fine doctors
Rather like them both. Tried some more
cold whiskey. 1t effected my head some
whatly. Tried another pint Of hot whis-
key. Very fine doctors-know just how
TO cure cold Shall employ them 10y
the year. Tried two pints Of cod Hhis-
key. Began to feel better; felt Ike
another man. Tried two pints more Of
hot whiskey; felt like two other men
Fine doctors | love them quilely. Kept
on with the whiskcy; felt like thses rr
four new men but there never lived
such doctors. Tried half a quart Of cold
whiskey mixed with half quart of hot
ditto; ditto always means whisLsY. Felt
better, felt like company Of new men
Tried to get in line formed in the shape
Of hollow square on the foyr Took
some more wLiskey; don't rcmcmber
whether it was hot or cold, or cold or bot.
felt much better. Passed vote Of
thanks to the physicians; felt better
Drank to their health got tho whisAcy
mixed. Felt Ike brigade Of new men.
Tried to surround my enemy. Moved
upon his works and he gave me battle.
Took another position. Threw ny entire
corps to sne front Attacked the com-
missary camp, and took pint Of whiskey
prisJ Jner Fine doctors; Ike their way
Of curing colds. a good way; was five
days proving it to be q good wav. Hair
pulled little, but It was on account of
The cold. They said I'd feel liSe new
man, and I believe them. Wien you
have cold try the new style.
Spiritually, "BRICK" PeaERoY