Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1864-12-03


ise water, it IL the pla spell ov the soul.
The man who has never courted has lived
in vain he has been a blind man among
Landscapes and waterskapes; he has been
q def man in the land of hand Origins
and BY the side Of murmuri.g canals
Courting is like little springs of water
that steal out from under rock at the
foot ov mountain, and runs down the hill
side by side, singing and dansing and
spatering each other, eddying and froth-
ing and MISLEADING, now hiding under the
bank now full ov shadder, till bimeby
tha jine and then tha 60 slow. am in
favor ov long courting; it gives the par
ties a chance tn find out each uther's
trump kards, it is good exercise, and is
just as innersent as merno lambs
Courting IL like strawberries and cream
wants to be did slow, then yu get the fla
vor. have saw folks git acquainted, fail
in luv, git married, settle down and get
tcw work, in three weeks from date This
IL just the wa sum folks larn trade
Akaunts for the CRATE number of almitey
mean mechanics We hav and the poor
! job tha turn out. Perhaps it il best if
shud state sum good advise tew voting
men who are about to court with nal
view to matrimony, as it was.
In the fust place. young man, w want
tew get yure system awl rite and then find
a young woman who iz willing tew be
courted on the square.
The next thing IL to find out how old
she is, which yu can dew bi asking her
and she will sa that she il 10 years old,
and this you will find won't be far from
out ov the wa.
| The next best thing IL to begin moder'
ate say ouse every mite in the week for
the fust six months, increasing the dose
as the patient seems to require
1t is a fust rate wa to court the girls
mother little on the start, for there IL
one thing woman never despizes, aud
that il, leetle good courting, if it il
done strictly on the square. After the
tust year you will begin to be we'll ac'
quainted and will begin to like the biz.
illness.
There IL one thing alwas advice, and
that il, not to swop fotographs oitener
than onse in 10 days, unless you forget
how the gal looks.
Occasionally yu want tew look sorry
and draw in yure wind as tho yu had pain
this will set the girl to teezing yu tew fad
out what aiis yu.
Evening meetings are good thing to
tend. 1t will keep yure religion in tune
and then if the gal happens to he ttare,
! by aksident, she can ask yu to 60 hum
with her.
AS a general thing I wouldn't bras on
other gals much when | waz courting. 1t
mite look as tho va knu tew muteh.
If you will court three years in this wa,
awl the time on the square, if yu don't sa
it IL leetle the slickest time in yure lie.
yu can get measured for hat at my ex.
pense, and pa for it.
Doa't court for mummy, nor buty, nor
relashuns! these things are jst about as
the kerosencile refining Dizziness, liable
tew get out Of repair and bust at emmy
minute court gal for fun, for the luv
yu bear her, for the Virtue and Dizziness
there IL in her; court her for wife and
mother; court her rs you would court n
farm for the strength ov the sile and the
perfeckshun Of the title; court her as tho
she want fule and va nuther court her
in the kitchen and in the parlor, over the
wash tub and at the pianner court this
wa, young man, and If yu don't git good
wife, the fault won't be in the courting.
Young man, you can rely upon Josh
Billings. and if yu kant make these rules
work, jist send for him, and he vii! show
yu how the thing il did--it shan't cost va
a cent.-Josh Billings.
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