Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1864-03-05
SWEET LMISARTSo
BY A WIDOW OF THREE HUSBANDS.

feople taiR OF making love- lDere ls
no such thing--it grows. The seed is
sown with one pair Of s,though another
pair Of eyes, in the soil of the heart, and
there it vegetables, And wonderful plant
it is, this love. The magic flower in the
fairy tale that caused doors to open and
walls TO sink into the earth at a touch,
was fool to it. The changes produced
by its necromantio influence beat all the
old enchantments hollow. 1t sometimes
converts an ordinary young fellow into an
Adonis, before you can say Jack Robin
son, and pock marked maiden with red
hair, becomes, under its spell, o smooth
faced Venus, with auburn ringles in the
twinkling of bed-post. Its effects are
always, however, abrupt and sudden
Much depends upon the soil of the hearts
where the eye-seed fall. If it is soft and
rich and warm, presto up springs the en-
chantod plant, like the germs of seed
sown in wet flannel, when the shock of
, electricity is passed through them. The
, whole process of sowing, growing and de-
, veloplng does not take sixty seconds, and
-. no further cultivation is needed. The
agency of sighs, tears, smiles and misty
glances, may be admirable for the ventil-
f alton, the watering and the summing of
0 love that is backward in coming forward,
! but 'love at first sight, being perfect at its
birth, requires no new stimulants 90 make
it bud and bloom. When the little love-
e seed falls on q hard and tough surface, it
c is quite another afflr. The eyes thai
n planted it must moisten the soil with tears
and warm it with tender glances, or ten
to one if it does not die in the flint, for
s ack of nutrimept But, pshaw girls, 3,
o why should describe love to you Don't
Is you know, all of you, either by instinct
l.. or experience, what the article is, how it
- is planted, how it grows, and how to cul-
y tivate it? | guess you do And as for
L. the men, am not talking to them at all.
n About accepted sweethearts, girls, and
II how to treat them. All there, now.
u have the advantage Of you. have been
-, throug h the pleasure grounds of courtship
~ and the thorny thicket of matrimony three
le times, and if have lost some of my roses
a. OF the route, have gathered good many
" of those tough specimens of moral botany
~ known as experiences. lfyou think these
- - credentials give me claim to your conf
" dence, take my advice. You will find i
"a sound, honest and practical. In the frs
nd place, never give your declared sweetheart
st. reason TO believe that ycu are over heat
>. the human species generally requires to b.
Il, kept on the qui vive. No matter how
's- much you love him, play him like trout
t. for, how ever much he may be in love will
II. you, it is an even chance thatyo lose hin
go if you don t. Men are afraid of womei
who are too fond, be sure of that Afrait
on Of them as wives | mean.
tn Don't let your lover come to see you to
DIS often, young lady. Make your presence
n . treat to him to be contemplated in advanc
-, With the same rapture that Mahomst sal
!. ~ she experienced in his dream about tn
uT house of Paradise. That favors easil
no crbsas old as the hills and as fiat as dish
IT, water, but nevertheless as true as gospe
~ Therefore, be chary of that pretty mout
no OF yours. Miss Sweetlips. You undel
stand me. Though your teeth were white
than the whitest water lily, and you
breath more fragrant than Oriental OFT
~. of roses, custom would stale the beauty G
20 the one and the perfume of the other
w. Keep your lips to yourself, fair lady, unit
}" you make them over in fee simple at tn
at altar. And don't be sentimental. Th;
ed style is played out The mon have bee
IN, Rosa Mathilda'd to death The highfow
=, and the extra poetic Cupid's marked.
p, you have leaning toward the lofty an
II the emotion a. careen the other way an
b. lean earthward, like v-he tower OF PIT
d Depend upon it, that the 'higI Morse sen
= timent i. bad nag for the matrimonial
course.
A word with the beauties. If heaven
has made you as handsome as st. Cecilia,
u young lady don't mar the gift by being as
II naughty as Lucifer. Above oil don't play
the satrap over your adorer, and pu,
n fguratively speaking, your delicate foot
upon his neck. The masculine anima
- does not like to be abused, even by gai-
II ter boot or bigger than Cinderella's slip.
t per. II you must snub him, at least be
wise enough not to do it before folks
Never humilitate him in company Shall
e ltell you why l give this counsel Be-
r. cause after marriage his turn will come
and revenge is delicacy for which mar
D has decided relish. | have seen the in.
i, suit OF courtship paid off with interest il
g the connubial state-haven't you.
a Should 'Woman's Rights happen to b,
your particular weakness, why dear, the
:, less you show your hand to your sweet
j. heart, as regards that point, tho better
5, Keep your views about female suffrage
of and all, perdu, as pleasant surprise TO
him after the knot is tied, and he is iairl,
launched into matrimoDy Otherwise h
o might slide off. Men, prejudiced creatu
res that they are, have notion that stronI
Is minded women are all Mrs. Caudles.-
ty 'First catch your hear, as the old cooker
D. book says, you can then cook his goose
as you think proper. Perhaps, upon tn
whole, if you can get rid of your idiosin
,ts Grassy it will be as well; or if you can't
that, it may be wise not 10 marry at all. =