Mineral Point weekly tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1859-1868, 1864-08-17
GAMBLERS ANNUITY.

greatness, and got it at bargain. A cen
fury ago Gambler sold tripe at TOttletOn. he
sold good tripe, and consequently was a IA
nous man in his line and time But Gambler
aspired TO fame after death-to an immortal
name in the ear of succeeding generations OF
Tottletonians. Triple was not calculated 10
give it him. Posterty would not be likely
to remember that their ancestors bought good
tripe at the shop Of Gambler. But still the
tripe-seler of Tottleton was resolved that
the name Of Gambler should be handed down
to generations yet unborn. This Is how
Gambler did it. He made a viii and died
Tie making of the will was deliberate at
fsir but not so the dying part of the bust
aess Gambler did not intend to die when he
did. but he could not help himself In the
full vigor of his manhood he fell victim TO
hard-boiled eggs. They opened Gambler and
declared hard-boiled eggs to be the cause and
then they opened the will, and found that the
eminent trIpe-seHer Of Tottleton, setting
aside his relatives, had left all his worldly
wealth to be applied to the purposes of char
ity The reward of conscientious tripe-sel-
ling had not been great, for the whole of
Gamblers worldly wealth amounted TO no
more than two hundred pounds. In his will
he directed that this sum should be placed
out at interest; and that the annual proceeds
should form an annuity to be granted by the
votes of the househoiGers of Tottle ton to des-
ttute but deserving old men of that parish
1t was especially directed that the benevo-
lence should be called Gamblers Annuity"
| was first brought to a knowledge of the
name and fame OF Gambler about two wears
ago, when | went out To take up my abode
at Toteleton. Iottleton Is a very pretty place
in the merry month Of July; and the chest
and laburuum trees which line both ides
of the broad white road which constitutes
Tettieton's only street are most beautiful TO
a. I
But there was another beautiful feature of
Tottletown which seemed TO do it infinitely
more CREDITS almshousce. 1t appeared To
me that the private houses bore no sort Of
adequate proportion To them, and the ONLY
houses which did were the public-houses.-
The way in which these two institutions
were regularly alternated on both sides of the
road for more than mile suggested that the
one was the cause of the other. 1t seemed
as if the public-houses had brought the
whole neighborhood to poverty, and consigu-
ed the entire population to dependence. The
moral inscriptions which met the eye told but
of two things-stToug drink and old men and
women OF the parish come to grief. The
Cock and Bottle appeared To be responsible
FOR seven poor old men the Nag's Head for
nine poor old women and the bell tor four
teen orphan girls. There was, however.
striking disproportion between the size Of the
public houses and that of tn aimshouses-
The latter were so small and compact, and
with large superscripuou ia front Of them,
so like neat parcel, that they might have
been brought down from somewhere by the
carrier. Possibly they might have been left
at the Cock and Bottle TIL called for
Well if the sins of Tottleton had been
multitudiEous, Charity had dome her best to
cover them.
| had mentally pointed this moral when
Mr. Gubbius, running OUT from the Swan, adj
dressed me. Perhaps | should state that l
honored the Swan with my patronage, as re-
CARDS the family mild ale.
Beg your pardon, sir; bus I'll take it as
favor if you viii give your vote for Pars-
lev"
| ventured to inquire who Parsley was, and
what he was standing for. Was it the Dor
ough, the country, or simply the vestry.
No, Parsley did not aspire so high. He
vas merely candidate for Gamblers Anuui-
Y. Parsley's qualification was all right.
lie was seventy-fve years of age, native of
the parish had paid rates and taxes for over
forty years, was eaten up with the rhematics,
Was past work bore an excellent character,
and hadn't penny in the world. Gamblers
Annuity amounting TO 90 lbs "a. would
make him happy and comfortable for the re-
mainder of his DAYS The statemcn of Pars-
ley's numerous merits in the way of age. dies
tltution and incapacity was not to be resisted,
ana I tHlnk i SHNutu nave CFlCu PARSLEY
forever" or the spot, only il occurred 10 me
considering Parscv's age, that it wouldn't be
much use. However, promised to enter an
appearance on the following evening, and
vote for Parsley
When at the appointed time | turned out
into the village, and came in sight of the
Swans swinging sign, i could see hat some
thing was creating great sensation It W.
the election for Gamblers Annuity Gould
ka from H..
would have had no regrets on the score of
the hard boiled eggs That fatal indigestion
had awoke TO a glorious Immortality. The
honored name of Gambler was in every
mouth. The boys shouted it in triumph: the
grown-up people murmJred il in grateful ad-
miration. and III the bow-window of the
Swan it was inscribed in large letters. hind
side foremost, in the innocent idea that an
inscription designed TO be read from the in
side could be easily deciphered from the out
On minghng with the little crowd that had
collected round the horseback under the
Swans swinging sign, | found the merits of
the candidates being discussed with great
animation. | say candidates for l now
learned for the first time that Parsley was
not the only one. There was another, and
his name was Barrowfeld Would l vote
for Barrowfeid?
According TO the reprcS, ntatiOns of his
friends at the horseback Barrowtield was
aged, INDECENT, and afflicted 20 an unprece-
dented extent. One bold partisan yeutured
upon the assertion that Barrow field had been
present at the coronation OF George the
Third. Another declared that, however that
might be, he could testify from his own
knowledge that Barrowtield had been pres
ent at the military practice last Wednesday
week, and that he had not even winked when
they let off the six hundred FOUNDER This
was adduSed in evidence of the profound and
stony character Of Barrowteld's deafness
Ii l. mentioned, as further supporting Bar
rowteld's claim TO the bounty of the immor-
tai Gambler that even if he were elected and
were provided with victuals for the rest of
his lite, it would not be of much advantage
TO him. as he hadn't tooth left in his head
Ii was also stated incidentally that in the
course Of his long career, Barrowteld had
sustained fractures (mostly cempound) of al
most every bone IN his body; had lost two
wives, three cows, and a donkey; and had
had his grey hairs brought to the very verge
of the grave by the misconduct of a large
family OF sons ana daughters, who. according
to the popular account, had fallen in and
marched quiek-step TO the bad, in d delibe-
rate and organized manner.
lAar 81 - l. i