The daily register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1863-1864, 1864-04-30
,2aalI.ralal TIT
Wise-and Otherwise.

Es A few days since, an account for nine-
teen cavalry swords at Eve dollars each
$95-1passed through, the Treasury Depart
mens. By clerical error: the warrant was
tlfswn for $s, 500, instead Of $95, 90. The
party to whom the money was due harpen-
ing to be an honest man, returned tue
check for $9, 500 stating that # was hum
dred times the amount to which he was
entitled, II The matter came to the ears OF
Mr.. Chase, who ordered the Immediate and
unconditional dismissal Of every clerk
through whose hands the blunder passed
un1ptiSed.y Fohr mep were deprived Of
good situations in consequence. - .'
NAN WHO DIDx'T WANT OFFICE
q. At the Capital in these days, man who
does not want an Office or hasn't got ono
already, is a rare dpis, fandin view of this
fact, / think the following circumstance
worthy Of paragraphic mention: A gentle
man who had been in the employ Of the
Government for some time in q capacity in
which Eheswas no longer needed, called
upon Secretary Stanton few days ago to
settle up his acconn and strike his balance
with the Government. The Secretary was
so we'll pleased' with the manner in which
he had performed his labor, that he tender
ed him another position equally as pleasant
and profitable as the first, but MIR
declined, stating, that he did MT want
office any longer, and would not except any
position under the government at present.
"Well," said Mr.. Stanton. "that's strange
must make note of that Here is a man
that don't want Office, The matter soon
got noised abroad in the War Department
aud occasioned great surprise on the part of
every, body that heard it. 4 u
Paymaster General Andrews, is universal
ly conceded to be the most '.erotchety" OF
all the heads of the War Department. He
is the most difficult Of access, and the least
sociable Of all the powers that be in the
domain Of Mars as represented here. Mr..
- called at his Office the day after the
interview with Stanton, and sent in his
card for admittancc The Paymaster Gen
eral on seeing the card, approaching his
desk, and said to the waiter in anticipation,
tTt's no use, l can't be seen; be must call
some other time" A moment afterward
however, on being made aware Of the name
of the applicant, he reconsidered his deter
mination, and ordered Mr.. to be ad
imitted. -f & a = 80
"Take seat sir, understand that ynu
ara the man who didn't want an office" said
the P. NJ. G. 80
81 am sir, 1 told Secretary Stanton 50
said Mr.. -.
"Well draw up chair and let me talk to
you I'm id glad to see man that don't
want an.-ofice.F 10 ~
CONGRESSMAN PERPLExED
'tffWalking along the avenue yesterday met
q Congressman who seemed to be soreiy per
picked about something | asked him what
was the matter and he replied "Why it is
enough to make Saint Peter swear / am
q moral man 1 go to church regularly, and |
try to lead good life, but there are things
that human patience can't endure" |
made up my mind that something desperate
had happened to the NJ. c. and entreated
him to unbosom himself which he did as
follows: il HJ.
q "Pve been trying for the last four days
% get an audience with the President |
nave gone to the White House every
morning and waited till dark, but could
lot get q chance to. speak to him until to
lay, when Twas admitted to his presence.
told him what / wanted and supposed
vas going to get direct answer, when
What do you think b? Why he started off
With "Do you know | heard good thing
yesterday about the difference between ali
amsterdam Dutchman and any other dam
Dutehman 2" And then he commenced
telling his stories. He told three, and |
lidn't listen to word he said. Twas mad
enough to knock the old fellow DOWN
B ut the worst of the whole thing was that
ust as he got through with the last story,
il came Secretary Seward, who said he
must have private conversation with him
md Lincoln cooly turned to
ne and said, Mr. can you call again Z
Damn his impudence, | say, to keep me
listening to his jokes for two hours and
then ask me to call again. q
MR.. L1NcoLN's LAST JOKE.
Mr.. Lincoln's last joke is related as fol-
lows by Governor Yates: The Governor
,alled on the President this morning, and
luring their interview the latter remarked:
yates. I'll tell you the difference between
the concrete and the abstract: when the
senate passed q resolution requesting me
not to appoint any more Brigadiers, as the
were all full, that's the concrete
ut when a Senator comes up here with
ong petition and longer face requesting
me to make Brigadier out Of some SCALA
wag Of afriend Of his, as it happens every
day-I call that the abstract" a
The Governor thought the illustration
was very good and laughed heartily over