Holmes County farmer. [volume] (Millersburg, Ohio) 1857-1926, 1864-03-03
JOB PRINTING
Warietp.

He that gives good advice builds with one
hand; he that gives good counsel and exam
pie builds with both; but he that gives
good admonition and bad example Luilds
with one hand and pulls down with the
other.
To pardon those absurdites in ourselves
which we can not suffer in others is neither
better nor worse than to be more willing to
be fools ourselvs than to see others so.
If you see a misery hypocrite praying on a
Mount of Olives, probably he is about to
build an Oil-mill up there; if weeping by the
Brook kedron youmay conclude he is about
to fish for crabs.
Ii unfortunately you find yourself riding
the devil of anger, you had better ride the
bruit half dead, till he fall down, that you
may not have to mount him again for quar-
ter of year.
In the old temples, oracular revelations
were received in sleep. a great many peo-
pie seem to seek for oracular revelations in
the same condition in our modern chur-
ches.
WHEN we see two young lovers kneeling
at the altar, the heart S wish is that they
may resemble the married in heaven, who,
according to Swedenborgs vision always
melt into one angel.
< A STRONG but sinful spirit rises upward
not like the lark to make music, butlike the
falcon TO dart on his prey.
THE years pelt young girl with red roses
till her checks are all on fire. BY and by
begin throwing white roses, and that morn
ing flush passes away.
TAKING an enemy into ones mouth to
steal away his brains isn't so bad as swind
ling II friend. You had better take in an
enemy than take in friend.
SAY what is right, and let Others say what
they please. You are responsible for only
one tongue-even if you are married man.
Up in the heavens the fogs of our days
must one day be resolved into stars, even as
the mist of the milky way is parted by the
telescope into suns.
THE reason why woman has her way so
much oftener than man is that both he
and she are conscious that her way is the
best.
THE too frequent use of authority impairs
, it. If thunder were continual, 1t would ex-
orcise no more sensation than the noise OF q
mill.
!, MAY God grant us sometimes hard nut
to crack for after such nuts the table-wine
' of life tastes deliciously.
AN unjust acquisition is like barbed ar
= row, which must be drawn backward with
terrible anguish or else will be your des-
tructlOn.
: AMBITION often puts men to doing the
meanest offices as climbing is performed
] in the same posture as creeping.
=. IL MEN show their faith by their works,
the faith of a good many would seem to be
= in the Devil.
l He who thinks every man rogue is very
0 certain to see one when he shaves himself,
+ and he ought, in justice to his neighbors, tc
e surrender the'rascal to justice.
5 Bob did you go to 1daho?'
IS 'Yes."
c "What did you dg?"
: Il dug home as soon as possible.
:, "WELL, Tom,' said grocer to his ap
y prentice, you have been apprcnticed nov
!, months, and have seen the several depart
: ments of our trade. | wish to give you
% choice of occupation. "Well, now, wha
~ part of the business do you like best ~
10 ''Shuttin up, sir"
rs A soldier shot big double-fsted thick
Il lped Niger dead, in Davenport on Christ
a per is in Il aquandary as to which side to tax
lg up on,
I Why is the apple highest up on the tree
&c the best.
/ Because it is a ''tip-top' apple.
IN AN itinerant phrenologist. stopped at
ne rustic farm house, the proprietor OF whlc
was busily engaged in threshing.
ne ''Sir, am a phrenologist. Would 20
OF like me to examine the heads Of your chi
ed .dren. | will do it cheap"
at 'Wall, said the farmer, pausing betwee
no the strokes, II rather guess they don t nee
nd it. The old woman combs them with q til
~ tooth comb once week.
rne' THERE has been no rain in Hungary Il
nearly two years. As consequence II
H.. crops have come to nothing, and the flocl
' and herds are dying, disease having folio,
ed the draught The writer estimates Il
: loss at sixty million dollars.
Mother" said little Archie, ''what la
cl" guage do We talk p
English, my dear. "
,n ''Why, are we English? l thought ,
was QuaherS."
THEY are deeply religious people
! Rhode Island, if the following be true !,
Connecticut schoolmastcr asked lad fro
Newport, elbow many Gods are there
nd The boy, after scratching his head sol
&c. time, replied, II don't know how ma
lre,. you We got in Connecticut, but VIC have no
les, in Rhode Island"
YER TIE difference between John Morgan a
IL. Neal Dow is that one stole himself il
wn, prison, and the other stole out.
w. w. He is not great who is not greatly go
.iaj nJ -Shah$pcarG
nnd I As two urchins were trotting along
lis. gethcr, one of them fell and broke pitcl
hov he was carrying. He commenced crying
rFcc when the other boy asked him why he tt
wa on so.
i q Cause" said he, when get no
nod mother will whip me for breaking the mul
= 70 What, said the other, amt you you
who any grand d-mother living at pour house Z
,nte "No."
o tra. "Well, [ have, and might break
,tch mugs, and they darcn't whip me. "