Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1864-07-27

Somebody has compared marriage to wire
rat trap. the large end of the cone outside, 50
as 10 permit the victim to enter withlut diff
fcutv; but. when be discovers that the toast
ed cheese which ,lecsyed him into the trap is
mot what is was cracked up to be- and
essays to depart, the sharp points Of the wire
remind him that he is in for il, without .
chance Tor escape dare say the idea was
originated by some crusty old bachelor. who
had been jlred by every girl Of his-ucquain-
tance. and who. ike the fox in The fable. con-
>olrd lin eli with the cry Of sour grapes.
because wife was beyond his reach 1 lcok
upon marriage as one Of the great instufions
Of humanitv and no more to b.. compared to
a, rat-trap than are the. ladies to he lillened to
toasted chre-e. Goof old Ben Franklin said
ihe sexes were like the halves Of a pair Of
>ci-scr.--of ne possible use without eachsoth
.r Who ,ha' haS s,eu an unfor unaie old
l.nchel,r VIII gai say the cmparizop2
S,~aking OF bachelors, reminds me that l
belong to that grea'lv-to be-commiseraie,l
class. I',rdboiy', hui esS what my age is.
B II here iS no denying The ract tha, au a
haehrlnr-eohiimed some Of my lady friends
sa, ,--;n,l a pretty snnply fixed of bachelor,
too. can tell you. My apar ments are as
comfortable as they can he made and when
1 get an my dressing-gown and slippers-the
gil OF an anxious mother. who irie i to catch
me for one of her daughters-and am seated
in my armchair, with lighted Figaro or
Manila between my teeth, 1 sometimes feel
pretty well satisfied with my condition Of
single be>,edne~s. CandidIy speaking, how
ever. am not a bachelor by choice can
not think. Of entering into the detail of the
circumstances which have made me what I
am II would take too much time. and, be-
sides would'nt be.pleasant to rela Shals-
reart. inrimateS that there i. nothing in a
name. am usually di<po-ed to concede to
the Bard Of Avon more than ordinary wisdom
and renrtraiion; bu; right here must join
issue with him.
NV name is Jenkins-Thomas jefferson
Jrnkin<l No, badnane, l. it? l. looks
well written or printed: especially written.
/ II yor make vour J ; with flourish as al
wns DO AID ye1, in spite Off 5 being a good
,amr. and pretty one 10 Wi e, I have never
YET been able TO find a ycung lady who ap
ns.rel to fancy IL None Of them seem t"
hin, hat Ms. Tncmas Jefferson jenkins
would look veil on visiting card, and 50 !
IN duamed 10 blush unseen, and waste my
>y, e.ne,s on the desert AR
Oae e., ening sat in my bachelor anart-
nient, c,rsily smoking my pipe aud gazing III. o
4 huge wood FIRE. which burned upon the
he;,rtll, warming and lighting the whole room
at the same lime. Iti< Wonderful how smoke
generates thought. Ike Marvel has published
III, bachelor reyeries over wood FIRE, a ccal
ire. and a cigar, Lu, he has never given the
result OF his cogitatious with pipe in Ii,
mouth, If, indeed ! smokes a pipe, or dio
smoke one; mrnn-for, poor fellow. he's {
married man, now. and all his bachelor reve
rieS aud pipe-sm 1kingS are over But on thi'
particular evening, as I sat smoking, got Il
hiukrg. and my thoughts took prettyuearly
tue iurm in hich have written them down
But. all at once, while 1 sa; dreaming by III,
lire, heard tapping at my chamber door.
L WAS a wild night without; The winC
hGv led aud slreked like spirit of evil. tn,
I'D W sashes ratified, aud lu Z tree whicl
crew close ta.my room grated har>hly again>
the side of 'he house, as if beg4i iag Tor admis
sion ir,m the cold without Who could br
coming 10 visit me un such a night2 But
soon put an en-. 70 the mystery by opening
he door. A sable son of Africa entered
handed me- driica'ely-rerfrmei billet aut
. departed Il waS directed. in remrrkaLl,
reat t.nmle hand. TO Mr. Thoma, jefferson
J-ukius. IbroKe1I seal and read
Mis-, .hirSou presents her compliment
To N. jenkins. and avuiling herself Of rh
piyile, Wicll leap-year gives to ladies' re-
quests ta,, pleasure of his company tomOrroy
evening. Miss J. hegs the honor Of the yisi
10 enable Ia,r to C 'mmuuicaie matter of pc
cIIiar IN crest to 3Ir. J. She deems it prope
: to state this much in order that he may no
expect to lind party present on The ooe'
sion
What could it mean? My acquaintanc
with Miss johnson was a very limited ont
. I had met her half dozen times at as man
parties. bui bad never dreamed OF making a
an imIuessish. She evidently mrdtaled
proposal however, and I mast prepare my
!, self for it. Had size fallen in love with N
good looks; had she taken fancy to m
name, or had my winning wa, caplivare
her. couldn't under .and it. and 20 wei
To brd-' TO >leen. perchanre to dream.
y The next morning I awoke bright and ga
~, ~, and the first thing that popped into N
= mind was tie occurrn,e Of the night be'or
Was it dre MP N" for the little scent,
billet was there on nv table ate my brea
= fast, aud tried to 60 about my business. bur
vain. Ic nd think Of nothing buI Miss Joll
III and INV evenings engag'mert--f"r ht
determined to Comply with her request.
tarne,l the matter over in my mind in eve
" shape and form. but to no purpose. She W
- rich and beau iIul-T, though not as poor
jobs turkey, had nothing to invest in baI
/" etoca Why should ,he fancy me? conl
ut understand it, and SO determined to awi
the issue. l
= I should say that my heart pulsated aur
"' bly, as l pulled the tell that evening at
= rich Mr.. Johnson's door am not sure Il
~ u. heard it beat, but would be willing to ia
les an oath that 1 felt as If it would hammer
way through my vest. I was usheTed il