Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1864-11-19
How they GO to Bed.

The difference between man and .
woman in disposition, finds no palmer il
lustration than that afforded at the moment
when either Of them retires 10 bed.
The young girl trips to her chamber,
and with the cautious timidisy peculiar TO
her, frs. locks the doors, and srrsBges
widow curtains, so that by no possible
chance passer by or belated nocturnal
wanderer from the pavement can catch =
glimpse Of her budding beauty whan ca
disaopih. This task completed, she turns
on tho gas to its full, and institutes a gon'
eral search throughout the apartment,
.ha. she may be shure il does not contain .
"horrible burglar" or desperate rufhau iu
big whiskers and crisp black hair. Care
fully, with her delicate little fingers, she
lifts the bed-vaance, where even Tom
Thumb could't squeeze his dimiputve COR
poration, and takes dimnutiva corpora.
ton, and takes dminutve bcep into the
halfempted trunks, not forgetting TO glance
nervously under the sofa, the space be-
tween which and the floor is not sufficient
to contain the ghost OF Calvin Edison,
much less an ordinary robbsr.
Having ascer,ained that she is really
alone, she Ieisurely proceeds to divest her
fair form of tthe silk and linen convention
aities of society,"" First she relieves her
glossy hair from It's thraldom OF pins aud
combs, and "does it up more completely.
! Then off comes the little collar, and the
: light vapory cloud of lace she calls her
= underseeves, which all the day have been
clssped around her white, plump arms BY
couple of India rubber strips. Next,
the "love Of spring silk dress is unfass-
e ened in front. Then suudry waste strings
e and button straps are loosed, and 10 what
e a collapse, like that Of loves big balloon.
y She stands like Saturn in the centre Of
1t rings. There they lie upon the soft CAR
re pet, partly covered by The linen underfx-
l. ings, with no more expression in them
than there is in the bare floor beneath tho
y, carpet Sits she now ON the edge Of the
a. snowy bed, and begins the unlaciDg Of
te CATERS and the disrobing Of those fair.
sr swelling limbs II her stockings. The
i'd pretty little foot is carefully perched upon
er the knee-down drops the gaiter, off comes
'h the elastic, and her thumb inserted .! the
he top Of her stockings pushes it downtown
| A. ha IL
'r- the prunella. So with the other foot, only
re involveiug slight change opposition.
to There is smile that peeps out from be'
at hind the plushes Of her sweet face now,
ng as standing before the lass she places up
lid on her head the night-cap, and with
nd quick twist Of her fingers ties the be-
* witching bow Then the nigh gown i!
nd thrown ovor the frailled chemise, conseal
,us ing the heaving bosom, and the shoulder
in the linen folds. Then the counterpart
and sheets are thrown back, the gas i
- turned down-vcry, very low-aud N
In little form presses the yielding couch, ant
'le- the angel goes of into the world of dreams
- Now, in the room directly over her
and the great brute of brother. He come
vas into it, shuts the door with slam, turn
inc the key with snap, growls at a chai
sai which happens to be in his way, pulls Of
bes his boots and throws them in corner
oux Jerks his socks from hs feet, drops b
hoe pantaloons on the floor and lets them 10
l'ch there gets off his coat and vest by quicl
'ted vindicativo sort oftwist of his arms an
un- body, unpins and unbuttons his cola
om- throws it carelessly With The tie at, rathe
than on the table travels to the windo
'nce in his shirt extremity to let down the cul
'een tains, as if he didn's care cuss wheth
ians the entire population Of the street behel
cry, his anatomy or not then puts out the lig
do and bounccs into bed, like great ca
'ueh Jumping into pile of hay-curls hims'
the up, his knees ueariy touching his nos
'tion stretches his limbs ou. ,sVears al the tue
ing in of the bed clothes, grunts,gets ov
MA on the other side, aud is asleep. Th
,;.o comes in the snoring and snorting. Isl
and tuc'e u'n0ieue' ~ 9'9"'
usIa' NOVEL BEr.-Two gentlemen residi
res in Brooklyn made bet on tie Preside
ssry ,ial election which ii carried out, will
and liable to create SOM amusement amol
J be our citizens. The bet was for boay
all hat, which was to be twenty four incl
and in heigh. and seven in breadth Of bri
shall The individual whose iavorite was elect
the is to wear tho hat during the President
term. Such novel headed pieos wo1
,dred AN