The Union. [volume] (Georgetown, Del.) 1863-1866, 1864-03-11
The following dialogue then snaded !:

The following dialogue tnen snsues.
seNhsre are you going, Tomf"o s,--,-.s- a =
"Going to dinner, / reckon"
"Give me back my money before y9u go
( +.Let me see, it was you gave il me, wasn't
itS1 asked Tom, inquiringly. 80. & y
! .'.of course it was" replied Mr.. -. lsc .Ir
.Then, ifyou gave it me, | shan't give 1t
back sA
"No, only lent you"
/ "Then," replied Tom, with grin, "PH
repay you when Pm able" and he vent to
dinner. J
The argument was unanswerable.
PRESIDENTIAL PuN.-A gentleman, some
time ago, limited to the President that it was
deemed cutie settled that he wosld accept
a denomination for his present Office, where
upon Mr.. Lincoln was reminded of story of
Jesse Dubois, out in Illinsis. Jesse as State
Auditor, had charge Of the State House at
Springfield. An itinerant preacher came
along and asked the use of it for lecture.
con what subjectf" asked Jesse.
"On the second coming of our Saviour"
answered the long-faced Millerite.
80 bosh," retorted Uncle Jesse, testify;
81 guess if our Saviour had ever been to
Springfield, and had got away with his life,
he'd be too smart to think of coming back
again" ...
This, Mr. Lincoln said, was very much his
case about the succession.
| A BIG THING ON BILLY.-Uncle Abe, IN
elucidating his estimate of Presidential hon
ors, tells clever story, as he always does.
when he sets about it. 1t seems that Windy
Billy. who is a politician of no ordinary
nretensions, was candidate for the Consul
ship of Bayonne, and he urged his appoint
ment with the eloquencc offs Clay or a Sew
ard. He boasted vociferously of his activity
in promoting the success of the Republican
ticket. and averred with his impassionef
earnestness that he and he alone had made
Abe President. ~ .as
"Ahp' exclaimed the sage of Springfield
s'and it was you who made me President
was it?" twinkle in his eye all the time
,Yes," said Billy, rubbing his. hands and
throwing out his chest, as a baggage-naster
would small valise, Eyes, l think l. may
say am the man who made you President,
'Wcll, Billy, my boy, if that's the case Is
a h---ll of muss you got me into, thstseii'
But Billy went to France and---'}aek again.
ONE OF OLD ANS BEsI.-One day, as the
| President and friend was sitting en- the
House of Representative steps, the session
| closed. and the members filed out IN a pooy'
Abraham looked after them with serious
smile "That reminds me, said he, 'oI
little incident when | was boy; my na0
boat lay up at Alton, on the Mississippi ior
a dsv. and 1 strollcd about the town.
saw a large stone building, with MASSIVE
walls. not 50 handsome, though, as this; and
while was locking it, the iron gateway
opened, and a great body of men came ont
"what do you call that?" | asked oys'"h-
dor. "That," said he lis the State Prison
and those are all thieves going home lnslF
time is up" -
WEARING THE HAT--1t is a singular his
tor;cal fact that confidential intimacy exist
between James II. and William Penn 'Pe
founder of Pennsylyania. James once CON
desceuded to use playful reprool 10 'ne
nocul;oritv of the Quaker, who, the first time
he entered his presence after he became
king, did so with his hat on. James mme-
diately took of his own. -.
"Frieud James" said Penn, why, "dost
thou uncover thy headf" A1
i because" replied his Majesty, with "a
smile ''it is tho fashion here for only one man
, to wear his hat H. r.a .-.y
| WE ARE RUINED, not by what We really
4 want, hut by what we think we do, there
3 fore never 90 abroad in search ofyour wants
: If they be real wants, they will come hom'
a in search of youi for he that buys what h'
n does not want will soon want what he can
: not buy. -.....
A sTYIIsHLT dressed young lady recent.
70 testified before Court in Paris that she wa
a. well paid for fainting away at the theatre
r out Of pure emotion at the tragical momen
pointed out beforehand by the author OF th'
g play.
Ar unprinoipled guest at Wheeling Va
: hotel absccnded without paying his bill
a His heavy trunk was considered as an equiya
"a lent however, until it was discovered to b
" empty and nailed tothe floor. t..-,.. ..,s-.
m SoME of the ladies in Hartfort appear !
ii the streets without hoops, but with ress'
n. that come only to the ankle, disclosing Ba
moral boots and striped stockings. One
h. the Hartford papers thinks this .''plea
ant reform" asv
re PEopIx live unoommonly long at Brighter
Ter There are two men there so old that they nav
ar f,rcotten who they are, and there'is no'bod
O alive who can remember it for them, atlF
y. - ROUSSEAU used ta- say, "that to write
: good loye-letter you ought to begin witho'
1. knowing what you mean to say, and to fpis
~ without knowing what you have written"
N. lARrHMus WARp says there.is no daily p
ae Per published in his town, but there Is
of dies sewing circle. which answers thepurpcs