The mountain Democrat., 1864-11-05
A Race with . VVidow.
Nercifnl Jahoainhat and Rreat big

ts,-@zS.A \ .s~S Pee h.A 18th '"-> ~ -; "a
(oW We chartered an Othni6us fdrtwO,
Christmas, and started.
Widow said I, where viii you go!'
well, Jehuel, If you insist upon t,snd
am to have my choice, would rAtherSo
TO the church
what for wilder said I.
'Oh, Jehuel, how can you ask me!
cause ! want to know
well, (blushing redder than beeD-
it is such cold weather, and the nights
are so awful cold, And--oh. Jehuel, l pos.
sibly can't stand it,
'Oh, pshaw, widow, spit it out; what
do you mean"
The widow riled she billed right over
like quart Of milk on the fire, and burst
out with:
If you can't understand me, you're q
heartles brute
Hold your horses! said l. Whats
all this about2 I'm not brute, nor new
er was; and if q man called me that I'd
strike him sure.'
And then / billed right over, and unbut-
toned my collar to keep me from bursting
off my buttons. The widow saw | was
going to explode, or else collapse my wind.
pipe, and she flung her arm around me,
put her lips to mine, and cooled down.
'Jehuel, dear, said she, in an insinust-
ing way, and voice as sweet as hand
organ, 'Jehuel. dear, wanted to go to
church to get mar-no can't say it oil,
you finish the word, Jehuel, sweet
tWhak word marin p
'Oh, you stupid! Jehuel, mean the
word married 7
Married, widOwI' said I, did you
mean that
Indeed did, Jehuel love-
Look here, mRrm, my name isn't
Jehuel love, nor Jehuel dear, nor Jehucl
sweet, I'd have you know; and won't
get married to nobody but one and you
are not the she.'
Oh, pewter pennies, but didn't she
rave. She made one dash at me; lodged,
and she went butt up against the other
end Of the omnibus. Crack went her
comb, and smash went her bran new bon.
net, that didn't buy for her, and down
she went with her face on the straw
But in another awful moment she rose
again, and made one more dash at me.
dropped-she went over me and butted
the door; the strap broke, and out she
went.
Drive on 7 yelled.
Woman overboard!' shouted sailor
passenger.
Stop that white coat--breach Of prom.
ise-reward- Herald-publish ! shrieked
the rolling widow in tones of intense NOR
tai agony.
Drive on I shouted.
'Where to ? asked the driver.
To the deuce-to Dorchester-tC
Brighton-anywhere, so that | escape
matrimCny and the widow
He started-so did the widow, and theT
We had it up fremont street, the 'bu,
having about a hundred yards the start
Foot by foot the widow gained. Thinks
I Jehuel, you're a goner. thought i
best to tighten ship. SO first hove over
board the straw! Still she gained on US
Then overheard went the cushions. Blu
still she gained.
More steam, driver, for mercy's sake,
| shrieked
I'VE are going now shouted the driv
er, >thirleen miles an hour-more thar
the law allows
Jehosaphat how the widow ran sh
hove off her bonnet, and come up hant
over hand. A thought struck me, and
off with MY white coat, and flung it righ
down in her path. She sprang on it lik
a she tiger, and tore it to pieces. Oh
how the pieces flew. wept to see it go
but life is dearer than a coat, and my tail
or is making me new one. Here "
gained full two hundred yards But OF
she came again. Once more ! could SCI
the green in her eyes. Merciful Moses
how l felt
Driver said I, kill them horses, o
else try to get at least another mile out
them
'Wiil you pay for them p he asked.
yes, yes, said |, only save me froH
that widow.
By crackery, we did slide; the widow
no longer gained, but she held her oW
beautifully. Thus We had it throug
Roxburry, where three policemen in val
attempt ed to catch us-probably sup
posing we were running away with som
bank funds. My only hope WAS in reach
ing Brighton ahead of her, for knoV
they would hide me there. We were o.
the Charles river bridge, and, oh, Moses
the draw was up, and sloop goin
through.
Driver said I, Jump that bridge, an
I'll make your fortune for life sure a
you're born
IN do it or dic!' he cried.
And he did it. The widow jumped al
ter US, fell into the Charles River, an
hasn't been heard of since. was saved
We have already announced the abar
donment of the Republican candidates b
several journals in different parts Of th
country. We hear of another case to da
} that Of the Westchester IN. Y Mon
! tor, which, in making the change know
to its readers, says =" In view of thes
indictments against the Lincoln Admins
trntion, the revolution in public sentimeI
, is astounding, and the country, with on
accord, exclaims, give US chang&in th
Administration. Influential presses, hert
tofore its advocates, all cry aloud give I
q changel' We certainly cannot be an
worse off, We must have it, or may big
e Heaven alone protect our common coul
e try from the impending doom that avail
us in the downfall Of our Government" :"
CAN LINCOLN CARRY CALIFORNIA;
1860, the vote of this State stood for
. Douglas. Observation-Disclosures. s.
-, Breckinridge. NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. ..S4'Si
oeH'.'''''' ''...''''.''''.''''' 90
Total, III, 81
= Lincoln's vote. te..,.................. ..39, Il