Holmes County farmer. [volume] (Millersburg, Ohio) 1857-1926, 1864-05-19
jon PRINTING
Warietp.


To whom YOU betray your secrets you be.
tray your liberty
In the gate where suspicion enters love
goes out.
Who'll not keep penny will never have
many.
Those who shun society are either very
strong or very weak
To him who has tears in his eyes, the
earth and the heavens tremble.
In, the spring the birds present their bills,
when their notes are revived.
The readiest and the best way to find out
what future duty will be is to do present
duty rl.r
With faint hands we hold the drained
cup Of joy, which when empty weighs the
| most.
There is no monarch's signet ring that
Is typical Of as much duty as the wedding
ring is
1T is in seasons of sorrow that love more
especially roots itself; as trees are best graf.
ted on cloudy days.
A Canadian girl put off her wedding and
lost her lover, because she couldn't settle
upon the sixth bridesmaid
1t is a sad thing when men have neither
heart enough to speak well, nor judgment
enough to hold their tongues; this is the
foundation Of all impertinence.
Every household has its pet names. Mr..
i Jones enchants his helpmate by calling her
his . idol, Jones, however, privately
spells it i-d-l-e.
A surgical journal speaks of man who
| lived five years with ball in head. Job
Squires says he has known ladies to live
twice as long with nothing but balls in their
heads
A young man advertises in New Jersey
paper for situation as son-in-law in re-
spectacle family. Would have no objection,
he says, to going short distance into the
|, country.
! 1t has been discovered that brandy or
rum Is remedy for an overdose Of chloro-
: form.-Ec.
Would not remedy for an overdose Of
brandy and rum be still more interesting
discovery?
1t will take long time to iron the great
gunboats recently constructed. Our people
in high place don't find ironing half SO easy
as stealing.
Speaking of rising with the lark, Arte-
mus Ward says he should prefer to rise with
gold
Josh Billings, in his glossary of "war
and army phrazes," defines successful
raid" as, 'cutting off turnpike within the
enemy's lines, and bringing in blind mule
and two niggers, to board. "
There is Brown Society" in Glasgow.
| All the members must bear the name of
Brown: Each member pays an annual fee,
and INDECENT Browns are benefited thereby
The society has been in existence a hundred
years.
e A distinguished California divine was
asked after trip to silver land, "what he
| thought of the country?" He replied
: There are but three things at Washoe, sir
n big mines, little mines, and whisky shops
d in other words, Ophir holes, gopher holes,
e and loafer holes.
n An attorney, on being called to account
;, for having acted unprotessionally in taking
e less than the usual fees from his client,
: pleaded that he had taken all the man had.
He was thereupon honorably acquitted
A mann met boy on horseback crying
with cold
i why don't you get down and lead the
horse! that's the way to get warm, )" said
the man.
It's b-b-barrowed horse, and I'll ride
him if | freeze"
Ike Marver says he has no faith in cats;
| they are cold blooded race; they are the
politicians among domestic animals; they care
little who is master, or what are the over
turnings, so their pickings are secure; and
what are their midnight caucuses but pri-
mary meetings?
He who would be rich in knowledge and
original thought, will not allow dew drop
to gllsten in the morning sun, or a flower
to bloom in the meadow, much less the
more mysterious phenomena of nature with
in and without him to occur, and not ac-
, quire truth by severe yet delightful scru-
; tiny
1t is not known where he who invented
the plow was born, or where he died; yet
> he has effected more for the happiness of
the world than the whole race of heroes and
. conquerors who have drenched it with tears
and manured it with blood
e An exchange says occasionally we en-
/ counter man in our business relations,
Y who grumbles at the prices of advertising
r and job work. lie says the prices have ad-
vanced, and it ought not to be so yet if we
propose to buy any kind of goods or gro
f ceries of him-a calico dress for our wife,
t bleached domestic for shirt. or coffee,
and sugar to sweetep it-Qr a pair ct boots,
a barrel OF flour, load of hay or wood a
pound of beef or pork, he does not scrup pie
to charge us at least from 25 to 100 per
cent. advance on old prices; forgetting the
goose ought to be sauce for the gander."
Colonel B, who was very fat, being ac-
costed by a man whom he owed money
with ''how dye do?" answered, pretty
well, [ thank you you find l hold my
own."
Yes, sir, .rejoined the man, ''and mine,
too, to my sorrow.
A person that looked at the world in
somewhat gloomy colors, once complained
in NJ. Auber's presence how hard it was
that people must grow old.
" Hard as it is" replied the veteran
composer, lit seems to be the only means
yet discovered of enjoying long life.