The evening telegraph. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1864-1918, 1864-11-26
WIT. FUN. ANN HuMoH.

and vel tbev never want for .a,4s ''
-Ip5,,v,t r,.,I,. - .....-..
sril o, @ uJ' & w. .'tl.', a O't.e' is no, h's'>-
'"Ny 'N ass '11'u'' n' mas o'A'u'
-lhe soundet sleeper is restless az times, Ter /
ne must nave long lain that has no turu.ur.
Papa, DO people buy snuHs" "Yes, my /
dear; why '' "Wel, then, why do people say |
1,ti,.g ...;s. n,,c. d., ,-,,t many ,g,y, !
of s,li;rc ,,q r,5Ir ,I tbIuE. husband yau Z
have ~ rr,at r,,,y r.,y. ... ..,,, ,nc."
wv -''' "''' WY - '.'"7
a. a. su"f WINDOW 'n lhg Hlfln' A. .n.'.a' '.'
Iii is ,,.,,s,I ne th, i,,,,,l VIZ.
-5leat as you may Dg' .ue tI"tt vas NsAF
worm 9u.'' anu o'sI w. .iI Vlly huti.'N g"H
Neu,'d' h'nI t., uta,'h %. H',a'I eyes. As
you '".h'a .u EuA. 'U'' 'NNt'" "' l"'e'
I'm The uaglorota public house in Fleet s.roc.
there used OBJ hc w".teu over 'hr nhimuCrriega
NE following notice .-"Gcntlemcn learning To-
spell Wt requested io Hse Fos'erdbV's paper.
-"Nou say, Mr.. Suooks that y0l saw Che
p'atntiH leave the house. Was n in ulstrs 3"
"Nes, sir.. DO You know what caused the
haste 100 '1'm not quite snrrin. sir hut think /.
was tLc boot OF his landlord nIhas will DO.
Clerk. r.l Che uez. witness"
-uTs ,,.,, f,,t- OIL. f,,,. ... .....3 . .... ..
the Tirc rIrI who Admitted him I'll. v.u.' name
Bill 5" he asked. "Some people call me so"
replied he. "Tucn De- Is not at home for I nr .rl
him tell John, If any bill came TO say he was not
at home"
An American manor avs A g our .s1r.rter's
devil" was s1ipr home sttL b,. swertbctr, a fsgy
evening" since the love sick darnseI ,lid IN him,
| "DicE l in,r / shall never rat q, 6c4yr1' -
. UWhv 3" asked tho knight of the irls. .Eeg upa-
cause" said she, with d melting look, "l lo.c the
Devil so WE'LL
-uyyby so l1te 90 s1fl a ssb,,1r,4sfor o., Oh 1,,lc
urrhiD MS ne entered the room ON a cold .Iippsrv
morning "Why sir" rcunrd the buv "f5-
every step took forward ] Slid back two" nIu-
deed -" said the teacher chow did won Ger hero al
an, If that was the case" con said the bov
scratching his head on finding himself caught II
turned round and walked the other way"
1t Is said that NlIane Vastris the rrr,ors
/ English actress. used IN have her white slt,n
| boots scwed on her feet every morning. in order
/ that thrv shonId m perfcctIy the exuUiste shine
. of her eyuui,ite foot OF course thew had to H.,
rppcd of every night and the same pair rouId
never be worn but once She is said 20 have
made more c1nguests with her feet tban with hcr
face, beautiful as it was.
--"Sambo. can Won tell me i'm what building in
| Scarbro' people are most likely To take cold go
"Why, no, me strange in dc town and can't tel
dat" "Wen, l will tell you; Il is do bank 4"
/ GLOW is dat /" because there are so
/ many drafts in it," Dat is good. but now
can you tell me, sab what makes dare be so
/ many drafts in il :" "No." because so many
90 dare 10 raise de wind"
This ia tho s+vIe in yybicb tho C,i, o,os in
some rarts ~ Yora sbira conway The b;nt 4, b,ok
ward swains "Why don't you get married :"
said q young lady the other day to a bachelor
friend, who was down there on a visit i've
been irving for the last ten wears 10 find some one
| who wOuId he silly eneugh 10 have me % was thc
reply. "Thcn YOU haent been down our way.
| was the insinuaiipr reoinder.
TT, go. ,i.,f,. =, a.. s..-. ..,,,..,. III,
am'Hv, mnvn ,n,,iy M w ] 'oIuu u,Ln
,r s baar-s L, sot nv S sng o
"You see even Jamie Frasier. the idiot, docs not
fall asleep as so many of Won are doing" Jamie.
! not liking perbaps To be thus designated c1Olv
replied, @An hndna' been an IDIOT. / gnd tn,
been sleepn to-
No,yoman hasa RIGHT N tho hos, so,t ,bo
oosiest ,gr1nr 20 ottort,rs coiioU,yiSs S ii
tbo rn,nor con. .idsrItions aId over anG No.
tbSse N ronaiitv in other 1nottsPs If she intrn1r
mt tba norsny's nuInjt tho Jar,or's ar-i,,, tLe
iectnrcr,s desk the senators chair tbS M ne
cbanic's worksbop, sh, hNs no righf 70 mans
,i,s ribt 11t f doors sb, rabor1ss tbs, nv
her drawing.room,
NJ i,,',, -, - , e,,,,1,,, ,,t,1 -, -,o-,,,.
- s ,Uns I m - i iI q OISs -
brpan with one of the former in these words, -
! GNy dear child tell me who made yOur villa
body :" Wa we'll know. of course. what he ex-
npricd the airl 10 saw in repIv INT we should rot
have dreamed OF her immcdilte answer. She mad
not any conception Of the question applying to
ANYTHING beyond her actual appcarauce and
drSypninss oJicE curtscy. replied please. air
| mother 1nLe tho bodv bnt made the skirt -
nrr,,II, s,-,,,,or Won, orro.r % bo t-,v.1
w, ~ 90 m 3 aPPO,T - W ~ "a,U 80,
@ 6 al ~ = 70, 80 20, go W.. % ,,
/ ", lit ,i,l + 10 80, beSyn ,bcrc - HNnd
- IN, ttnt'J Jibt lt, ,,, o S 80 ~ ,iht T
E&'%y & 'p,tb h2 :, i, bv IoHr, sIidc :, ,1Ii,yo
oI, 49, Ion- IN tbosc ,or,s 81 G6Joyor ",,y.
,',o ,bar ~ 1resant Fye feat nine y "D, vo
,or SoytI,in, oag, >, i,Ycs I hoH"bto n now vyRSt
s, ;1bj ,Sr', ,,T tbnr,It co. ,,ou, ~,
bnrUcst s,'I iiad ~ eoep an tbiS road
'""' P''V o'"No " va
-Dr' rrahkiln, Whon III EnSAud ID tle yeh'
no, was asheu Oy dhooleulah "hay WUuiu shusiy y
the Amercans nc auSmetGI M We, 5, Sn"1 ny m mh'ghl
enslIy uc COnPllocu ia ~" Nv o Nul'u A'
immedlately wrote on q piece oi papeE-IAus -
ne can your forces; SS5;,,
So ,So or,o5o oTo % pos.n
d. bp",i ,i,U gnI,r sttIItjoD,i CO.
~ - o 60 reterions ~ to,as
RoiInd tbs J1tiss Won have eytortea
- NJ IL '-' N"''' ~
Ni5eA Dc 1i,iso,rd tuis
10 coiuc navr,ant fo, tbo dsstroved tea Will
P.o 80, ,,'ts 81 ,bc ToiSsS and Ier
uitoo Wy ,O'i,'s' ~ ~ ~ nv, ~ " '''
~ ~ Jo,Co J,iia iii u l"Pr'
i'o eone'ii"'io"
The following conversation is sara 10 nave
passed between tneatrca manager ana an '-sp'
, rant for Ihespian honors' IL IS qui'e goOa un
ana ralher severe on STARS
r Manager-What is your pleasure
AppIicant-An eng-ga- cement at you-you-youl
theatre.
Manager-But you s,anmer'
Apphcant-Lke BeIIerton'
Manager-Gou are very small
, | Applcant-Llke Mean