The Ashland union. [volume] (Ashland, Ashland County, Ohio) 1854-1868, 1864-02-03

ZINE Following from the Bangor MAINE
+sneeFat, is a good @take off, 1t display.
ssfaA a. much sound sense, and a great dea
more wit, than Lincoln's proclamation Of aam
nesty," and really echoes Lincolnism in much
better manner than Lincoln can do it himself
Whereas, a dozen of my hayward "Sisters'
- I,a On : certain DAY, elope from my boarding
err tonfederacy, ESQ Called, without cause Of
a proyocatlon having set up housekeeping fol-
themselves in a rickety shanty, situated soutb
OF the old homestead and,
Hes 9fkensds, This shanty was built ON my
= land, which i Inherited from my old Puritan
father and,
Whereas, the aforesaid "Sisters~ have be-
SOME greatly reduced in circumstances, inso.
much as to be In want of certain necessaries
90 such as tea, bacon and dimity; and,
Whereas, The rebellious spirit OF a portion
Of these Sisters" has become subdued, they
having repented of their transgressions and
"a become converted to the true Abrahamio faith;
Therefore,, l In the sweetness of my temper,
q and in the magnanimity of my generous ma.
4 ture, do ordain, promulsate, set forth and let
ny the conditions upon which they may be
feceived again into my bosom.
First: These runaway females, above men.
- toned, are required to pack up their earnings,
ssrhosom-plns, siae-combs, perfume-bottles, cups
@E8A4 1aoOSAot OduQ1G-uIOutQS aHQ all OJnGr Or
paments, usually denominated Hhouse-keep-
ing,H and deliver the same within thirty days
Atkortress Monroe, in the care of Major
a General Butler, zwhozhas a peculiar knack for
the safe keeping of other peoples property.
Second: Every Sister owning certain chat
Ties called negroes, mulattoes, quadroons or
other<property, Of a mixed or colored nature
are required to paste over their two eyes a
postal currency of a denomination not less
@thanlfve-cents, and In such a manner as to
prevent them from ever finding their way
back, and cause them to be delivered, without
delay, at the emancipation bureau soon to
be erectedin Washington, and of which Josh
ma Il. Giddings, Wendell Phillips and Parker
Pftlsbury are to be the grand Yohoes, and
rSusau B. Anthony, Lucretia Mott and Mrs.
Rose the Festal Virgins. In the meantime,
while this 5edifce is being constructed, the
said negroes win occupy the moose-yard, for
merly called Maryland, but which of late, by
direction OF the President, has been humane
sly converted into a pasture suitable for this
purpose.
Third: As the said ASisters,n after they re-
turn, viii have no further use for the house
and lot where they have been living, they are
hereby ordered to bring along with them a
squit-claim deed of the same, which will be
taken In part payment for their board and
other expenses during their elopage.
The above terms having been complied with,
u ~ VI duuILudLlOus IL buDSCTlDoQ
20, viii seal the restoration, unless I happen
20 change my mind. Perhaps I may CON
Glade to do it some other way, and hence no
aSister" will be obliged to take it unless she
wants to.
III, erring Sister, do hereby affirm and de-
clare, that I viii support, for President of the
United States, my benefactor, DIR. Faust, dur.
ing his natural life. That I will support all
-n.~.,Inrnof11- 80
made last year and those to be made next
year. That I will support all his utterances,
whether he utters them or not; all his winks.
blinks, grimaces, anecdotes, c6ntortions. col
nundrums and the smallpox. And 1 further
declare that, in case the said doctor should
decline the honor of which there is no imme-
date prospect, I will support his son BOBBY
(socalled9 with the. same devotion as in the case
ofthe sire. And I further declare that, in case
Iehould ever find myself In doubt as how to1
act In any premises whatever, / will not RELY
1pon my own Judgment, or be governed by
the dictates of my own conscience, but will
apply Immediately to the aforesaid Anthony,
Mott and Rose, or to their spiritual adviser,
Horace Greeley, to instruct nae in the way of
my duty.
FAUST.
p. ST. deem it proper TO state that 1
have not seen Wendell Phillips for some
time, and therefore have not told him that the
issuing of this proclamation sfis the most fool
Isl act of n.y life"
The exceptions to the above amnesty are
the fascals who entieed away my erring Sis
tiers, who will be duly chastised when I catch
them-pnless I change my mind.
.. Adulteration is the order of the day,
in everything. All is shoddy. If you buy
groceries, your coffee, tea, sugar, even pepper
and spices are adulterated. You must pay
double. and often thribble prices, and be put
off with an aduIterated article at that. Ev-
erything Is adulturated-even man himself
Under the reign of abolitionism the very !
fountains of humanity are filled with hypoc-
risy, cant, and revenge. The creatures that
we used to call devils, we nov see among us q
as men,. This is the reign of abolitionism. /