The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1864-04-20
Joe Mayweed's Courtship,

The funny columns OF the EnEiish pa
pers derive more of their stufs for smiles
from Journals in the country, than from
any other source. We find in one of
them this ludicrous aneodote of certain
bewitched clock: e i e941 e
About half past seven o'clock on Sun
day night human leg, enveloped in blue
clothes might have been seen entering old
Cephas Borbary's kitchen window. The
leg followed by the entire body Of a Yam
kee, attired in Sunday go to, meeting
clothes. 1t was, in Short Joe Mayweed
who thus burglariously won his way into
the old deacon's kitchen. le
Wonder how much the old deacon made
by ordering ME not to darken his door
again soliloquized the young gentleman.
anything about windows. Windows are
as good as doors if there amt no nails to
tare trousers onto. Wonder if Sally will
come down. The ,critter promised me.
I'm afraid to move about here, might
break my shins over something or anoth-
er and awake the old folks. Cold enough
to freeze Polish bear here, 0, here
comes Sally.
The beauteous maid descended with
smile. tallow candle and box of lucifer
matches. 9114
After receiving a rapturous greeting
she made rousing FIRE in the cooking
stove, and the happy young people asat
down to enjoy the sweet Interchange of
hopes and vows.
But the course of true love ran not
bit smoother in Barbary's kitchen than
elsewhere, aud Joe was just making up
his mind to treat himself to a kiss, when
he was started by the voice of the deacon,
her father, shouting from the door of his
chamber.
Sail |! what are you getting up in the
middle of the night for? $685. ores
Tell him it's morning, whispered Joe
Mayweed.
l can't tell him fib, said Sally.
I'll make it truth, then, said Joe. And
running to the huge old-fashioned clock
that stood in the corner, he put the hands
at FIVE. 81 ..e sad =; +; t..:..
Look at the clock and tell me what time
it is, cried the old gentleman.
1t is FIVE by the clock, said Sally, and
corroborating her words the clock struck
FIVE. 80 aesiaetia staaa geds -fals $50
The lovers sat down again and resumed
their courtship. Suddenly the stairs be-
gan to creak.
: Good gracious it's father.
The deacon, by thunder exclaimed
Joe. Hide me, Sally.
Where can l hide you? exclaimed the
distraeted girl .s,sss..
0, | know, said he, I'll squeeze into
the clock case.
And withouta word he concealed him-
self in the case and closed the door.
The deacon was dressed, and seating
himself by the steve, pulled oat his pipe,
lighted it, and began deliberately to
sm oke. @ 81
Five O'clock, ha ? said he. We'll,
shall have time to smoke three or four
pipes aud then I'll go and feed the crit.
ters.
Hadn't you better go and feed the crit
ters first? suggested Sally.
No, smokin' clears my head and wakes
me up, replied the deacon, who seemed
not a whit disposed to hurry up the en-
joyment of bis pipe.
BURR whisl dingl dingi went the
clock. "so a4 $50 .59r
Tormented lighting, cried the deacon,
starting up and dropping bis pipe on the
stove, what'n earth's that?
It's only the clock striking FIVE, replied
Sally, tremuluuslS.
Power of creation! cried the deacon
Strikih' 6vpl It's struck more than a
hundred already. ~. a8, tes
Deacon Barbary, cried the deacoh's wife
who had hastily tobed .herselt and now
came plunging down stairs, III the widest
state Of alarm, what in the universe is the
matter with the clockp
Goodness only knows, replied the old
man. It's hundred years in the family;
and never knew it carry on so afore.
Whiz! ding went the clock again.
It'll burst itself, cried the old lady,
shedding food of tears, and there won't
be nothing left of. it.
It's bswitched, cried the deacon, who
contained a leaven of old New England
superstition in his hature. Anyhow, said
he, after pause, advancing resolutely
toward the clock, I'll see what's going
on in it. il ~.
Oh! don't cried his daughter, ssiaing
one of his coat tails, while his wife caught
| the other.
| Don't cried both women together. e
| Let go my raimsnt, shouted the dea-
con, L ain not afraid of the powers of
darkness.
But tie wo en- wouldn't 60; 50 the
deacon slipped out of his coat, and while
from the sudden cessation of resistance
they fell heavily to the acer, he pitched
forward and seized the knob Of the clock
But no human power could open it, for
Joe was holding it from the inside with
a death grip. ~. -
The old deacon began to be dreadfuliy
frightened. He gave one more tug, when
ian unearthily yell as of iiehd in distress
burst from the inside, the clock pitched
lheadforemost at the deacon, and wrecked
/ its fne proportion. The current of all
extinguished the candle-the deacon, the
[old lady, and Sally fewup stairs, and 10,
Mayweed. extricating himself from The
clock, effected his escape in the same way
in which he had entered. @
The next day all Appleton was alive