The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1864-04-09

shun, March II, 1S64.-Last Sundv we he'd
an imprOvin seem. Robert looms Punt
who hez bin studyin for the ministry with
me fer the past weeks, wuz licenst and
ordand. lie is yooth NV much promise.
lie vOtld twist for BOOkannOn, and only Is
yeres old, swarm his votes IN with a coolnis
and eese that eggscitid the admirashen NV
the patriarks at the biznis. I kin safely
say that he hez wbald lnOar Ablishnists,
bustid mOar Methodist Brethrin and luther
hetrodOx churches than any Dimocrat NV
bis age in the stait. He hez a brilyant flu
cher.
After the usual qwestions wuz put him
wuz dismist, and in the presents NV the
elders and dekuns alone, ! delivered the
fO]lOwin CHARGE:
Brother-Heyen bin reglerly ordained, it
only remanes fer lne TO Civ 700 wurd NV
council. YoO air gOin in 2 the apossel
biznis ut q rayther unfavrable time. Man
which IL born ov woman hez trubble for
his inheritance-Ive he'd so much NV it
that ef I he'd il TO do over agin 1woodent he
born at all.
The politikle hevins is orecest with pore
tenshus clOwds. The litenin NV wrath is
leaPin fruin wun to an uther, whist the thun-
der witch WIZ wnnst at distance, now
rores angrily in our GERS. Giraffe ritin. }
The ole ship Dimocrisy is tossing madly
| 1 L.
her seems open, the water IA furrin element
to her insides) a rushin in. The stiddiest
part nv her crew seed the botes and aban-
dOned her, and the rest Nv um er fitin for
the helum.
In the menetime the ole ship is dashin
past the haven Nv Success, and is hedin
strate fer the rox NV Destrucshen. To 700
is entrusted part Nv the work Nv savin
her. Let me entreet 700
l. vni0 tho SOliora With thovn mn ho1
nothin in common. They will despitefully
use 700. Wunst party NV EN- maid me
drink pint NV water and talk the oath NV
allejinse, witch outragis wuz follered by
CONGESTION Nv the BOWLS and infiamashen
NV the brane.
2. Alluz preech agin the niger. Its
soothin to a ginooine constOoshnel. suthern-
rites dimocrat to be constantly told that thar
is race NV men meaner than he is. Be
sides it's safe-the niger hez no vote. Ell
he he'd we might vary.
3. Alluz hev marter. The stait-rites
dimOcrisy alluz simpathyze with man
that's in basteels fer simpathyzen with the
sOwth, fer nun Nv US know how soon their
turn may kun.
4. Preech agin amalgamashen at least 4
sundays per munth. A man NV straw that
700 set up yerselfis the eesjest knoct down,
pertikerlv if 700 set him up with view Nv
nockin Nv him down.
5. Allns diloot yoor whisky fer new con-
verts. 1t talks much TO convert Ablish-
mist, and ef 700 use the pure artikkle il
wood kill q ordinary constooshn af0re he'd
hev time TO vote, witch wood be aggerva-
tin.
&. Sarch the skripters fathefully for sech
passagis ez cuzzid be Kanan servance obev
yoor masters and SIGH.
7. Lern to rede, or at leest git the shaip
Nv The letters SO fixt in yoor mind that
when 700 qwote from book or newspaper,
you will hold it rite side up. Eddicashen
| heZ bin n CRATE help 2 me.
3. Learn to spell and pronounce Miss.
enegenanashun. Its q good word.
The crate ledin ijees nv our sekt witch II
is yoor dooty to inkulkait is these: The
nigger's ape, Linkin q goriller, JET. Da-
Wis chrischen gentlemen, the rebellyun q
struggle for rites, the soljer buddy tool
Ben Butler beest, ct setiry. 700 air ne
yer 2 bleeve IN Fedral victrys, but must
alluz credit confedrit successes. woodent
advice you to let your faith in the COnfed-
risy go fur as to talk their skip on yer sal.
ary, neether wood burn greenbax.
| hev dun. 90, my bruther. Let vel
poler star be DimOcrisy, yer rallyin cry
''The Yoonun ez it wuz-the Constooshn 81
it H." which 10 latitoodinus, fite the good
| fite, and the day will cum wen 700 kin lay
OFF Der arMer, and with "P. NJ" after yel
nairn, engoy the repose that alluz follows
well.drectiu Ond wiggerus effort.
Bro. Punt startid to-day for Suthern Hi.
noy, where he has q cOngregashen. ),
PETROLEUM v. NAsDY,
Faster Nv sed Church, in charge.