Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1864-01-02
MISCELLANEOUS.
minnesota lawsuit.

III the scmi-rural districts of Winona, forty
miles north If that city, on the Minnesota
side of the Mississippi river. lives, among
several people. jolly good fellow Of JUS
ticc of the Peace, whose idea Of matters are
much like the waters Of deep river. Once
started it is hard to turn them. On a fair
day last week, after the lOXl2 law dispcnsa.
~ had been swept. after chairs mad been set
in & row against the side of the office. and
sundry whipped quids of tobacco and mutt
ated cigar stumps had been kicked under
the stove, there was wooden step on the
stairs and a vigorous rap at the door.
'Come ill.," said the Justice, as lie settled
into. legal look so hcitting man Of law
duly elected to dispense the iavors Of the
blind goddess.
\ stout woman entered. She had on u
short wooden orcSs--wOodcn sCled shoes
spOrted red checks, black hair. and eyes that
snapped like the lock ot Il snot- gun. In a
Portuguese accent, and in the worst possible
English, she said,-
You law man ~
Yes, madam he seated"
want paper. Want paper to take man ~
Just then stout French half-br IN
! tcrcd the room. He was unable to speak
half dozen words. and looked either scared
or bashtul. The Judge saw at once that
there was some marriage to come of, and
said to the woman, who stood with conf
pressed lips watching the Justice and the
door
Want "apcr to take this man ("
! "IeS--want paper. Me teach him. (Nicc
woman, thought the JustiCc) He no good
man me take him so quick as cav ~
"All right, my covics-tiA you in the jerk
Af a lambs tail said the Justice as he turn
ed to the man and said
You know this woman, can you take
her 2"
The man shook his head and muttcret
mintcligible words,
"Ah, l see. Can't talk English. Well
never mind"
He ran into the street, invited \ few
friends up stairs, and on returning with
them said to the woman
you want to take this niah for better or
for worse y
"Ycs--mc want to take him me pay"
"All right ~
Then turning to the man who stood
trembling
You take this wShan for better or for
worse, and promise to keep her." Sc., &c.
lymph ~ and several mods of the head.
Then in the name Of the law, and virtue
of the authority in me vested, pronounce
You man and wife And he stepped for
ward before the woman could say "A word
and kissed her red lips.
".SHp" came her hand in his face and she
clutchcd his hair. The new husband jumped
in to take the woman away, and To protect
/ her, as tue woman supposed, when IN self
preservation the Justice gave him rap on
the nose. The woman pitched into the new
husband, who in turn pitched into her and
4 a, r..l
. hustling and display of legs, garters, and
things decidedly astonishing.
At last the parties were separated, when
the man and woman took another turn AT
each other, the blood and hair flying in all
directions Down came the stove, over
went the table clattcr went the chairs, and
into the street like mad went the Justice
with a black eye and the bosom of his shirt
looking like warranty deed covered with
red seals
A crowd rushed up stairs and found the
man and woman lying on the floor, hugginl
each other like young bruins, their arms
and legs mixed up worse than tomato-yincs
the woman on top, and pommcmg hcI
nowly-madc husband with a hearty will.
: The ncwly-marred couple were scparnicd
when through the aid of two interpreters i
was discovered that the night before th'
parties, occupying adjoining shanties IN th,
,, lower part of the town, had got into a dis
pute over stoyepipe, which Was elaine,
/ by both, and from words they had come Il
E blows. Each party had come to the Justice
office in the morning for warrant for th'
other, with the result Ms stated above.
O The last news from there was that ia
parties had gone in search Of another Justic
} 10 unmArry them, while the genial cause o
= their terrible squabble was setting up th
bays and bathing his bunged eye In cam
phoT and whiskey. For AN actual fact IL /
| ihr Iichr.I within our knnMl lrdnn