Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1864-06-10
AUNT HEr1Y's IDEA OF .MArR1MONY.

Nov, girls, said Aunt IIeIty put dow
'Our CmLiuiCery aud wOrsitd work. d., snme
hing sen-ib'e, and step huilding air castles.
and talking "i lovers aud honey moons; il
makes me sick; lis perfecIl " antlnOnial. Live
Is u farce maII IimI"ny is IA hunibug; husbands
rIe h"nH site NapoIeuns, Serocs, AHx4nlprs
$iRhiug for Other hearts tn conquer after they
are sure of yours. The honey nruun is as sh"r
we'd as a ucier ma 'ch; after that you maywea'
\ ur We d,Iing dress at The wash tub, aud yuur
night Cap 20 meeIing. and ycur husband
""u.dn'U know ill., You may pick up you,
poe tkrl hs' ktrchiei, help yourself 10 chair.
aud spliI yuuI gown across the table to get n
i'i' ce of butter. While lie is laying in hi
breakfast as If it was the last lac should ge
bis side OF Jursinn; When he gets through, he
will aid y ur digrsi"n. (Vhile yau are slipping
your frs; cup of C. ff-r.) 10y il qniring whar
yUn'll have tor dinner. whether lie cnld lamb
@aS all a'e yes eriuY. it The chaGcnal is Ou'
md What y'u gave for the last green tea you
Dough? hen he gels up from the table.
'IghIs his Cigar with the morning paper, thai
4ou have of bad a chance to read; gives tive
or three Whit. Of smnkr, sure to give you thu
headache for the forenoon, and iIst IA his
coat ia | is vanishing throu. .sh the door, 8pO'o
! s'z $ for not doing thai errand, for you yes.
tIdIy-lhit ks it doubtful II he Can to-day
80 press, With business. Ypu here of him u,
" salOnn. while you are at home lining his 90
coat sleeves. Chi dren by the ears all day
can't get out to take air. feel as crazy as fly
~ drum husband cnmse hume at night.
nsF1s h'Uwd' ye d., FAR Boxes Charl>y's
rars, stands lille F amy up in the corner, sill,
down in the easiest chair, in the Narmest cor
uer, puts his teeI up over the CRATE, shutting
UUI all he fire, while 4 he hIbS IitIle png nose
grows blue with cold : reads The newspaper all
20 himself, sular.S his inner man with a hUI
cup Of Tea, aid just as you are labnring under
tue hHllucina ion that lIe will ask you to take
m"u'h'al Of fresh air with him, he puts on
MS dr' S ing gown and slippers, aud higgins {"
reckon up the family EXPENSES, alter Wh ch ht
liz s down on TN. sofia, shd you keep ime with
81 uT net die, while he snOrs till nine url.lck.
n Xt mnIning ask him to leave you little
mOney, be locks at you rs. If ln be sure that
y"u are in ypur right mind, draws sigh long
II Ou2h aud strong enou Gh To inh tte u pair Ol
bel"ws. and asks ysu wbat y"u want of ii. +.
ard if halt dollar won't p Great king!
as il all those Ii,Ilr shoes and stockings, aud
a dollaIr Oh, girs! set your affrctinn on cats,
p"odles, parrots or lap i.lgs-- but let matriniu
~ ainm. Is the hardest way on earth &.
getting a livine-ynu never know on earth
when Your walk is done. Think "f carryi 2
eight or Lie children through the :neaslts,
chicken p'x. nash, numps, and scarlet fever.
some Of 'rm rwice over il makes my sides
ache to think OF f! On, you may scrimp, and
save. and twist ard turn, and dig aId delve.
and ecOn"m z, and die, and your husband VIII
lake What y i've saved To drers his secund
wife Wirh. and will take your portrait tor
frc-b nId, sEd-7 hut what's The use Of Ia king?
Ill warrant, every one OF y"uil Try it The irsl
chance yen get-thereS sort OF bewiIch-
uIei about il somehow! l wi>h One-half tie
world warnu fools, anG l'UIher half idiots, l Do!
OBJ, deal!