, 1864-07-29


Tew rend a rock, and bust a cabbage"
So they tell me; but 1 shud rather try a
revolver on the savage, blast Of powder on
the rock, and good sharp vinegar on the
kabbage haint sarched histry to discover
who give the fast concert of musk. We
are told that in those days "the stars sang
together" but in these days you kant git
the stars to sing together. We often heard
said that "such a purson has a good ear Cor
musk !" don't fellowship with this re-
mark; awl purson wants tew understand
musk with is good soul "good ear"
haint got emmy more tew du with it than a
good set of branes has to dew with charity.
Musikal crickets insist that if the gammut
amt rite, the musk amt rite that is aVl
nonsenze; the gammut haint got emmy more
to do with hungry man than nife
and fork has with his dinner, if he is rael
hungry and kin eat with his fingers.
Musk want got up to make us wize, but
better natured. How much opperay musk
du yu suppoze it wud talk to make a man
cry? Folks will tell you that such an over
ture fria dubulo" (or sum other furrin
big named thing) "was most heavenlily rem
dered;" tina mite as we'll tell man that
punkin pie was heavenlily rendered What
do care about the rendering if don't git
a piece ov the pie? Let some Prime Don
ner, or Mezzer Sompeaner, or Bearytown
Base, or some sich larnin individual, cum
into this village and histe their flag, and
have a programmy ov singing as long as
sarch warrant and as hard to spell out as a
chineze procklamashun ritten up side down,
and tax seventy-iye cents for a preserved
seat, and most everybody will go to hear it,
bekause most everybodyelse duz, and will
sa every now and then, (out loud) chow be-
witching how delishus how egstatick !"
and ninetene out Nv evry twenty one NV
them wuldn't kno if the performans was
burlesk on their grandmother
Wuldn'I it be fun tew Gee one NV these op-
peray singers undertake to rok a baby tu
slepe 2" guess there wud be tu parts car
ried tu that song about that time. Suppose
yu shud come home at mite a very boy, and
Ia yer he'd onto yer muther's lap and she
shud let out a opperay? Good Lord wud yu
not think yure muther was a loonytik, or
ought to be at onst to save her karrakter
"Korreckt taist" is auuther big word I've
heerd folks uze it whuze finger nails wanted
cleanin. Musk, after all IL sumthin like
vittles, the more cooking and seazening we
uze, the more we have to have, till after a
while we kant enjoy ennything ov the Wit
ties but the pepper
Opperay don't have any more loosening
effeck on me than caster lie would on gra-
ven image. I set and gaze, and hark and
Gee the whole aujence in hiregliphics and
awl kan do IL to get mad that sich stuff IL
kalled musk But awl the reasoning in
the world wont konVince menny people that
tina don't understand word ov it; it is the
fashion to expire and have their souls dis
solve in latin at the rate ov rs cents, as it
has got to be did, ''sink or swim, survive or
perish" If ennybody wants tew go and
heer a man or wuman disgorge musk, that
has more kolik than melody into it, sup
pose (under the konstitushun,) tha have
just the same rite as tha hav tu crucif
themselves any other wa, for somebody els's
sins that tina don't know the natur oY