The Union. [volume] (Georgetown, Del.) 1863-1866, 1864-04-15
agit, as5isapnt, aud a5Hmar.

"In the conrse OF human events, S.
wife was blessed with baby, which, OF
course was most wonderful child. s.
was in raptures, as hewas in duty bound to-
be, and Dragged considerably about his boy
among his friends. One day, as he was 60
| ing home to dinner, he was overtaken near
his door by wsggish neighhor, whom he in
vited to sec the prodigy.
p demurred, alleging that he was In
somewhat of hurry-was no Judge Of the
article etc., but s. would not listen.
I ooh, come in said he, "and I'll show YOU
something thstll open your eyes; come, come
along, don't be afraid"
Thus urged, P consented, and in
they walked Mrs. s. was apparently
absent hut in one corner of the room stood
the cradle, in which was ensconsced and fast
asleep SIS future hopes.
'There," said he gently drawing down
the quilt, "there's boy for youl'
Saying which, he geutly lifted the slum-
berer out of his warm nest, and holding him
out in both hands, continued:
Talk about your boys-let 'em get up and
beat this. What dye think of him-isn'th he
specimenf That'll do pretty well for new
beginners, won't it, eh? ?"
At this moment Mrs. S. entered from
side room.
"why, S-w said she, that isn't our
baby-it's Mrs. So and Sos" their next
door neighbor) "She wanted me to take
: care of it moment while she went out"
s. was completely bewildered.
"Isn't this ours 2" he inquired, innocently,
d looking first at his wife and then at P,
S who stood ready to burst with laughter.
"No," said Mrs. s., decidedly
II "Here is ours" she continued, bringing from
II an adjoining room another infant wonder.
, swell declare" said s., looking
y first at one and then at the other, who'd have
!. thought could have made such mistake
~ -Harper's Msnhly.
Il A Coop Jokr-A Lieutenant, at the late
ID battle of Olustee, who had lost leg IN an
7 engagement in North Carolina, and who had
oe supplied it's place with an artificial member
on consisting Of stout naked peg, was present
- at this fght, aud while the battle was warm
as one could wish to experience, rebel
y sharpshooter put bullet through his wooden
A@ peg. He felt the blow but escaped the twinge
~ Of pain that generally accompanies the pas
- sage of bullet through genuine flesh and
s muscle, and enjoying keen sense OF the lu-
dicrous, he forgot the battle and its dangers.
and gave way to the heartiest and most ex-
~, plosye laughter. He pushed along the hne
and approached the Colonel, to whom, after q
~ severe effort, he was able to communicate the
.io cause of his mirth. Almost conyulsed with
H. laughter, he exclaimed;
"Colonel, by George id rebels have
~ shot me through the wooden leg! Ha ha'
DeviIish good joke on the fellowsW and with
that he hobbled back to his position in the
line. and ohuckled to himself immensely over
ho' the sell
her FocoY-A rather loquacious individual wss
The endeavoring to draw an old man into conveTsa-
tful ton. but hitherto without much SUCCESS the
if old fellow having sufficient discernment to see
and that his object was to make little sport for
, of the passengers at his expense.
- Al length says loquacious indivdul:
ex. 81 suppose you consider Down East right
the smart place; but guess it would puzzle
them to get up quite SO thick fog as we are
having here this morning, wouldn't itY
e.. Hh Gil, 6dlu bl6 ObnSf ldhB NSA N+NA-0''
I'm about that had one of your Massachu
,,,rg setts chap to work fer me last summer apo
vas one rather foggy morning sent him dovI
:. 10 the meadow to lay few courses Of shin
-. c1es on a new barn was frishin' of a
NOV dinner-time the fellow came up, and, sez he
yood That's an almighty long barn Of yourn. =
tbo Sez /, Not very long Well see he Nv
oF been to work all this forenoon, and haven
cot enc course laid yet Well, seq !, your
a lazy fellow, that's all I've got to say An
40 after dinner went down to see what
- had been about, and I'll be thundered ef b
hadn't shingled more than hundred fe'
right out on to the fog"
Valry hy-A genius down East intends applyir
of of Gov natent for machine which, he say
con' will chase hog over a ten-acre lot, cate
a the yoke, and ring him or, by slight change
would gearing, IL will chop him into sausagemea
field work his hristle into shoe-brushes, and me-
srous- ufacture his tail into corkscrew.
,tOA na~An Eastern paper states that MI
Carrie Millwood has one hundred ana n
letters in the Pembroke Post once
= Boston Advertiser says;-"Ii II she ns' aU' -
'nA'P tised for husband she can congratulate ne
have ''seN Ioroe nnai-if the letters
lag Of 'va :.s - rarr;e after ALL"
8. In 'io' ..D' -'' -, L.. &c ,ro,,r;a,or of
llrous, HaS a ii''ie ,.,:. - - ;ror;.;,;vs
6 such coal NINE ~ eAD " ,-h;ob hor fatb
1ilized to the nature oi ii0i rp0A r. =
aralel represen'eu !. % Oe q 70. en-. }, Ia y
oman. mose pfouis"us :, .o.l
anity, eeuians 70" se' 'ne Os''i "
a. your sErsH.s
TIE electors of Ohio have finally given &
70 gen. tue definite of the old poihoai pAnh0' "'
nj the. tos sfEhs right man in the r'sns p'Nss' -
Is; ysllandigham IN cansda'