The Union. [volume] (Georgetown, Del.) 1863-1866, 1864-04-01
asttt, agisdour, awa abauur.


acknowledgements. Once in a i0hile, however,
the offender chsnces to be one Of their own
brotherhood, as in the latest case on record.
At the recent examination Of Mr.. John Lo-
gle, farmer. of Murrayshaa, cslYs the Ealn-
burgh Reporter, on his sister entcSing She-
box to be examined, the following convefoa-
ton took place betw.cn her and the oppos-
ing agent: Agent How old are your
Miss Jane--"oh wesl, sir, lam au unmarried
woman, and dinna think It right to answer
that question" Jitdge--"Oh, Yes answer
the gentleman how old are you." Mss Jane
-"Weel, a weel, am iity." Age,'t-"Are
YOU not more7" Mss Jane-''Weei l am
sixty" The inquistive writsr still further
asked her if she had hopes Of getting married
to which Miss Jane replied; "Weel, SIR,
| Wilma surely tell lie; hinna lost hope
vet :" and she scornfully added. out | wid-
ma marry you for am aick ru' tired ofyoar
palaveg already" The examination than
proceeded.
ALEXANDER DuMAs AND MusHaooMs.-
Once while travelling toward Lake Constance
Alexander Dumas, the noted French writer
was compelled to stop at small hotel IN
yandutrv. IIQ did not understand the lam
guage Of the place, but managed to ask Tor
eggs, outlets and potatoes, none OF which
were to be had Remembering that the
mushrooms Of that country were in very hign
repute, he attempted to ask for dish OF
them, but his language here failed him. AS
a last resort, he snatched u pencil and paper
and drew what he thought to be good rep
resentstion Of tkem' "Oh, yes, yes" sad
the woman, and she at once started out In
five minutes she reappeared bringing dumas
an open umbrella A second look at his
sketch convinced him that she had brought
what his picture most nearly resembied.--
Perhaps the rain then falling may have help
ed her Imagination. (Try your skill in sketch
ing mushroom.l
a room poet, desiring compliment, asked
Guaranteeing to his recently published
poem of that name--"Haye you read my Des-
Gems into Hell? "No; should like to SOC
il" replied theYit."
ss-E---ssl .prcs5 member Of Parliamen. haT!ng
y-fasEed him, Have you readmy last speech"
he replied, 81 hope | have"
t .FA7HER, aid you ever have another wife
! besider mothera"
"No, my boy; what possesses you TO ass
such a question:
because saw in the old family Bible
where YOU married Amy Dominy, le55; and
that isn't mother, for her name is Sally
Smith"
, Two friends meeting, one remarked, IL
t have met man who told me looked exact
j. like you"
Tell me who it was, that | may knock
, him down. replied lis friend.
Don't trouble yourself" replied he, Il
+ did that myself at once
: Two deacons we're once dsputing about
: tho proposed site for new graveyard, when
the first remarked;-
9 "Pu never be buried in that ground a7
4 long as live."
What an obstinate man" said the second
g oif my life is spared, will
g Josu BILLrxas says that 'man who Will
o chaw turbacker will drink sanity kruse rum
/ and a man that will drink sanity kruse rum
!, will 90 to the devil, aud man who Will 50
= !, tbe devil is mean enuf to do emmy thug.
If Ara hotel in New York, rssentiy, an ola
10 gentleman came down stairs and iaqurei O.
the clerl. whether he had any tai.ow '@AA'e7,
10 Ro;ny informed that he could be 5npp'ea
r with tallow dips, the gentleman said "IheA
~ | wish you to give me soInei ! w''"' soHi0-
It. thing that can blow out, tor nave been
y blasting away at the cussed jgsef n MY
=. - room till I've no wind left"
ke The celebrated David Crackeei On visiting
re menoaerie. was comparing the couu1enance
or, of a monkey TO that Of one oi nis iel-'"-
RS, members Of Congress. Turning ne saw inc
he sen,lemnn had overheard his remarks, 50 to
cd make matters pleasant, he said, Il do not
", know which to apologize to, you are the mon
ii key"
v AN old lady in the vicinity Of Boston vino
ir desired a newspaper, refused to touch a copy
he Of the Trareliei having the Presidents mes
I'D saee in II. because the President had had 'l'e
d. small poz and she was afraid she sh0ld '4''A
:. it.
~ ~ Two old New Englaad ministers were II
ding by goal. when the older one as~sa 'Ae
ng other:-- a.
of 4Were would you be if that tree bore ITS
ose proper fruitf" ..s,..,
de Riding alone, sir" was the immediate
hat reply.
m, Is there an English word Il at contains al
h1 a the vowels -UnquestiOnably. A teetotalel
% thinks that all sensible people" would pre-
Ter them in their regular crder-Abstcmi
de- ously.
all A TURIN correspondent of daily pape
ace says, to keep one eye upon Venice ana IN
can other on Rome, is the constat occupation o
um tie Italian people. Ars all Itrhens cross
eyed