Gold Hill daily news. [volume] (Gold Hill, N.T. [Nev.]) 1863-1882, 1864-11-11
The Ethics of EriendshiP.

One OF the most sagaciouS morallStS OF
the present day has placed in the mouth
Of one of his characters this definition OF
the duties of friend: Never to ask |
disagreeable questions, nor to make per-
sonal observations, and to defend them H. !
g, their friends) behind their back; to
This might be added, to avoid making IN
CONVENIENT requests, and never TO indulge
N fiat contradiction. There are some
faults which are eminently oppressive to
others, such as eternally lecturing, teach
ing, criticising, improving, and setting
people straight. There are others which
iniure only those who commit them, and
these delinquents find forgiveness more
easily than others, though they are not
always those who cause the least suffering.
To avoid any undue strain on affection,
il is much more needful 10 think alike on
small topics than to be of accord on great
questions. On the whole, it is safer to
criticise the principles of your friend than
offend his tastes, and there are minds so
wise and tolerant in their nature as to
maintain the most harmonious relations !;
and yet the one may steadily refuse TO
adopt the others notion of the infinite.
Moreover, the man or woman who never,
if possible, disappoints reasonable exPec-
tation, or withholds or deferS hoped-tor
pleasure, will be more loved than he VINO
is prodigal of gifts and indulgences OF
sudden, unexpected and occasionally in
opportune kind. In defending an absent
friend, much must depend on whether the
attack IS Just or unjust, the accu-
sation we'll or i'll found. Under
the last supposi,iOn there is no limit
70 be laid down, except that pre-
scribed by good taste; but in the tirst case
the defense might safely be regulated ac-
cording to the ideas entertained OF the
obligations and privileges Of the PROBES,
sional advocate. If counsel duly retained
may and must, by prescrlptive right OF
custom, and in the strict line OF duty,
ignore, slur over, suppress, or explain
away all evidence against his client, and
urge all that can be said in favor OF an IN
.diyidual whom he knows to be guilty, the
man who has received the honorarium OF
friendship, more precious than gold, may
unouestionably suggest any matter in cX-
tenuation of justification OF his tnend'
Anu, Nv lIC -
advance anything which can invalidate the
veracity, the authority, or the character OF
the accuser, or to suggest whatever occurs
70 him tending to throw doubt on the
fact OF the commission of the deed or Of
tense of which there is question. So far
as an advocate may legitimately and hon
orably 60, so fer as a friend may venture;
but beyond those limits he must not trans
gress. The art of selecting and expressing
with refinement and discrimination sucn
ideas, thoughts and phrases as shall, by
natural sequence, operate on antagonistic
minds, so as to cause the differences and
suggestions wished for to arise on their
side, and to all appearances spontaneously,
ia rather intuitive and feminine than logi-
cal and inductive; and this is why all
women defend their absent friends more
successfully than men do, if they only pre-
vail on themselves to observe the frs,
great law in pugilsm, "hlt straight anc
issp your tsmper."-cOrah~ AaSas'"'