Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1864-04-02

MCALL A MAN.

Any one who is disposed to try laugh
will do we'll to read OH.
John Jackson was a hardworking man
| of twcnty.threc. Being the eldest child
and the only son, he had always remain.
ed home at assisting his father on the farm.
John was much respected by every on
in the noighborhood, and many bright
eyed girl had secretly thought she would
like TO be Mrs But John was no ladies
man. He would rather hoe all day than
undergo tho ceremony of an introduction
to a young lady. Not that he disliked
the dear creatures far from it.. We be-
! lieve that he, in common with all bashui
and well meaning men, entertained the
highest respect and admiration for them.
And this no doubt was the principal cause
Of lis bashfulness, lie felt that shey
were superior beings, and that he was
unworthy to associate with them upon
terms of equality. But we cannot stop
to moralze.
Nancy Clarke was the daughter of
very respectable farmer, whose land ad-
joined the Jackson farm. Nancy was
pretty, saucy little witch, and she liked
John Jackson, When they were children
! they attended the same school, ana al
though few years her senior, he was
usualay her champion in her childish dis
putes that arose, and her champion 10
coming and going. John discovered too
that he was growing out of shape. His
feet and legs appeared very awkward /;
he did not know what to do with his hands;
bis face panied him, and, takink al. in all
he was inclined TO think he was not more
than half put together.
As novelsts say, it was a lovely day in
August The sun was clear, and serene
and beautiful, the trees were laden with
golden fruit. aud the beautiful birds twit.
tered their songs of love in the branches
Earth, (thcre, we've slid down to eartl
once more; such lofty hcights--they mak'
our bead dizzy.) We were prepared t,
say that earth yielded bountiul har.
vest Of grass aud clover and honeysuckIes
which the noble yeomaDry Of Chester.
vile had garnered within her stone hous
es, but upon second thought we have con
cluded it thus; "rho farmers of Ches.
terviile had done harvesting"
John Jackson's sister had a quilting
that afternoon. Ills father had gone t.
Keith's Mills, to get some wheat ground
and left john to prepare TOOLS. 10 b
ready on the morrow to commences NOW
ing the meadow grass. Suddenly it oc
cure TO Joho, that If he remained abou
the house that afte. noon he would he call
cd in at tca-timc, and made to do tn
houoys of the table, TO avoid this h
shouidered Lis scythc, and stole away t
. the a.eadow, hal i mile distant, fully re
= solved that he would stay there unil
8 was so dark that he could not see to NOV
in order to avoid seeing the girls.
y, The meadow was surrounded on a.
sides by thick forest, which cffectuall
-, shut out Whist little breeze there nil l.
-, chance to be stirring. The sun pourc
D., its rays as though the meadow was lh
focus point, where their heat was conceu
trated. John moved aud sweat-swei
and moved, he was obliged 20 SIT dow
and cool eff. Then it occurred to Joh
:, that if he took off bis pants he might
u more comfortable There could be Il
improperly in it, ior be was entirely col
cealed from observation, and there W;
not the slightest reason to suppose that
> could be seen by any person.
l., So John stripped off, and with no COW
:, save his linen commonly called a sh
! he resumed his work. lie was just col
,. geatulatng himself upon the good tin
a he had made frQm meeting tho girls, wh(
~ he CHANGED to disturb huge black snail,
n a genuine twistcr, with white ring
. round his neck.
5. John was no coward, but he was mo
I. tally afraid of snake. "Self.preserv
|. ton" was the first passage" that hash'
le across his mind, and "legs do your dut!
|. was the next, Dropping his scythe, a.
to springjng around like a TOP, he was roa'
= to strike gao gait, when, at that m
II mept, the snake was ready to hook /
crooked teeth into Johns shirt, Just abo
the hem, With a tremendous spring,
IN started off with the speed of locomotiV
n His first jump took the snake clear frc
ne the ground, and as he stole haSty CLAN
at over his shoulder, he was horr6ed to
N the reptile securely fastened to the ext,
nifty of his garment, while the rapid
with which no rushed forward, kept I