The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1864-05-06

h"Slnante. One day, IN front OF tie pos
oftlce, ne was trying, by a vigorous appli
cation of raw hide, TO coax the beast into
something faster than slow walk, when
Tom Parsons, pert young fellow, who
thought that he knew almos, every thing
came cat and nailed him:
Il say, Alien, do YOU know what happened
TO R~laam?'
Quick ss thought came the answer:
The same as has happened to MEAN ass
spake 10 him.
THE following is sgood specimen of hard
lyin
There lives in New Hampshire a man cali
ed Joe; fellow noted FOR the tough lies he
can tell. Joe called in at Holtoa's lately,
and found him almost choked with smoke,
when he suggested, You don't know as much
about managing smoky chimneys as | DO,
Squire, or you'd euIe en- All said Hol-
ton, with interest, did YOU ever see a smoky
chimney cured:' Seen il 2 sad old Joe 4;
] think | have. | had the worst one in
Seabaard County once, ald cured il little
toe much How was that ? asked Holton.
Why, YOU see" said Joe, l built a little
house out yonder, at Wolf Hollow, ten o.,
twelve years ago. Jim Bush, the fellow that
built the chimneys, kept blind drunk lhre.
quarters Of the time, and crazy drunk The
other. told him thought he'd have some
thing wrong; but be stuck 10 il, and finish
ed the house. Well, we moved In and bu:.;
FIRE tie next morning TO boil the tea-keiiie
All The SMOKE came through the room and
went oct the windows not bit went out
up the tiues. We tried it for two or three
days, and il got worse and worse. By-and-
ny II came 10 rain, ard the rain began TO
come down the chimney. Ii put the fire out
in a minute, and directly it came down by
the pal,gl. W. had 10 get The baby of the
ground as soon a. W. could, or il would have
been drowned. In fifteen minute. the water
stOo- kaee-deep on the floor. pretty soon
saw what vas the matsr. The drunken cuss
had pL: the chimney wrong end up, and ii
4r.wed downward. Ii gathered ali the rain
wi'..in hundred yards, and poured it down
by bGcAel:uls.' .Nrii, that wss unfortunate
remarked IL lion. bu, what in the world
did You do with the hous- Surely yuu
never cured that chimney Didn't |
though? answered Old Joe; ives, | id.
How =" asked Ho,.on. Turned j: tie 9th
II end ~ SAD the iEcorrigible, and thel
Yea oush; 10 have seen il draw. That was
lte va, cured !: too much Drew too
much?' asked Holton. We'll. Squire. you
my js!-;e for yourself" said old Joe
P.e.,. ~s-n after W. got the chimney down
the Other end up, missed one of the chairs
-. Of tie room, AMI directly | seed another
OF m shooting toward the fireplace. Mex;
tn table went, ard | see the back log going
". Then | grabbed the old woman under
ne arm and the baby under t'other. and
started; IA, Just as got TO the door | sees
tn ca; -;oi., across the floor backward. hold
ing or with her claws to the carpet, yelling
a~fully. 1t wasn't no use. I just see her
going over the top of the chimney, and that
Was Inc las: OF her. Well, what did YOU
DO then = asked Hol,on; of course YOU
coald not live in such house, .C.uldn't
|, though > Slil joe; but did. | put =
Poultee 9n the j4mb of the fireplace. and
that drawtd l'Other way, SO We had no more
trouble