The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1864-03-12

MARRYING UNDER DrFF1CULrrKs,-Not
long since Confederate soldier returned
from the war to his home near the State
line dividing Kentucky and Tennessee
The first business he attended to was that
OF marrying the girl he had left behind
when he first started out to seek the bub-
Die reputation at the lannon's mouth. A
large party was gotten up by the brides
family, and man who was conceded to be
Justice Of the Peace, because he had held
the once Tor twenty years before the cruel
war had commenced, performed the cere-
mony that united two loving hearts that
had but q single thought. After these
rites had been observered there was
least OF hog and hominy, roast turkey.
pumpkin pies, ETC., and several gallons OF
forty-rod whisky to be discussed. In the
course Of human events the newly welded
pair were put to bed according to the GUS
tom still in vogue among the rural popula-
ton.
They had scarcely began to realize the
''situation" before there was great rat
Ting at their chamber door and an impera-
tive demand for them to rise. Some pry
ing people had just discovered that the
magistrate was not regularly elected off,
Ger, and was not justice at all. Alarm
took them all, and another Justice was
sent for who lived some miles distant
Before midnight the knot was tied again,
and the anxious couple were suffered to
retire for the second time.
The first cOntretemps was discussed free
~ by those who had not gone home. and
the various contingencies of the matter in
yestigated thoroughly. All at once it was
kaintuck, while the ceremony had been
performed just over the line in Tennessee
There was hurried rush up stairs, and
another arousing Of the bride and
groom. They came down stairs
some what dissatisfied with the turn
matters bad taken, and then the whole par
-ty went down the road three quarters OF a
mile till they got into the State where the
squire lived, and there the wedding rites
were performed for the third time. The
brides mother, not satisfied with this com
edy of errors, had, some time before, dis
patched swift messenger for stated
preacher, and when they got back to the
patefnal mansion, 10 make all things safe,
the knot was tied for the fourth time. By
the man of God. By this time the first
glimpse Of daylight. was strealing tie east
ern sky.
Wearied out by the experiences and anX
ieties Of the night, they We're at last suffer
ed to retire in peace. Half an hour had
not elapsed before the e was another con-
fusion in the house. 4 laundering knock
a. the chamber door Of the young couple
made the groom thoroughly mad He told
whoever ii was that it was TOO late" ard
swore he 'yoaid not get up again Tor ali the
mistakes in the world. He would whip
The first man tha. disturbed him again, he
didn't care who it was. 4 grutf demand 10
open the door If he did not wish 20 have It
beaten down, and the rattle of a mUsket
decided him once more 10 submit 70 the
Imposition.
On opening the portal, he was confronted
by Federal soldier, and the words, YOU
a 10 vHpfa oil vvit
Vainly did he plead TO have the privilege
of giving bail for his appearance, and all
his offers Of brides were as useless as the
idle wind. The officer charged with his az
restwas memorable, and now the chap is
spending his share of the honeymoon at
dieconsolate maid, bis bride, weeps for him
at 1ome.-AemPkis Bmlietin.
A MILITARY YARN.-A friend Of ours,
who has seen some service, and to whom
we are indebted for several original stories
Of similar nature which came under his
observation, furnishes rs the following an
ecdote, the truth Of which in every partlc-
ular he vouches for
One day while my regiment was on duty
At Columbus, Kentucky, received orders
from my Colonel to proceed to Memphis
with two companies of the regiment, in
charge Of some rebel prisoners: We EN- EN-
man, and Immediately sailed down the
river. Our boat had . large number Of
passengers on board, among whom was
Judge L, with whom was wen ac-
quainted, and who, by the way. was a
strong Union man. He asked If had any
I told him, Not in the least, when he went
forward, and selecting rough, uncouth,
lank-haired private from Arkansas, the
following colloquy ensued, which fairly Il.
Illustrates the intelligence Of our deluded
Southern b1 ethren =
Judge-'What Regiment do you belong
.Reb-'The 10Th Arkansas, by Cd"
Judge-'You have been in some battles !
Reb-'Well, reckon
Judge-'My friend what are you fighting
Reb-'we're fshtin' for our rights .
Judge-'Wen what are your rights, or of
x,l RsD71 tell YOU we are fishtin' for our
Juaee-' That's all very well, but define
Reb-sOh, amt no politician, and !
hain't got no education to speak on, but
/ know we're dghtin' for our rights,
Judes-sWsll, my friend, can tell you
what you are fighting for You are fight
fn9 - destroy the best Government and
noblest nation the world ever saw. Look
a& that glorious banner; pointing to the
stars and stripes floating from the gan, are
you not ashamed, sir, to ire on that beau
-tful na99'
Reb-7F1ag? I never saw that nag Till /
went and jined the army
Judge-'What You never saw the Stars
and 6tripee3
Reb-tNo, never did,
Judge-sHow old are your
Hebe'Bout thirty-five reckon
Judge, in tone Of stupendioas astonish-
meat, And you never saw the Stars and
Stripes before?'
HeRaa,No; told you once already
completely foored. With mingled feel
ingD OF indignation, pity and disnay, he
ve0ed, the deck some time in silence. Al
last, stepping directly in front ofhis moor.