davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
Hard of Hearing.

A young Jonathan once courtcd the
daughter of an old man that lived "down
east" who professed to be deficient in
hearing, but, forsooth, was more cautious
than limited in hearing, as the sequel will
show.
1t was a stormy night in the Ides of
March, if [ mistake not, when lightning
and the loud peal of thunder answered
thunder, that Jonthan sat by the old
mans fireside, discussing with the old la
dy (his intended mother-in- law the ex-
pediency of asking the old mans permis-
sion to marry "Sal," Jonathan resolved
to ''pop it" to the old man the next day
Night passed, and by dawn of another
day the old man was found in his barn
yard, feeding. Jonathan arose from the
bed early in the morning, and espyiug
the old man feeding his pigs, he resolved
to ask him for Sal
Scarce had a minute elapsed after
Jonathan made the resolution, ere he bids
the old man "good- d-morniug." Now Jona-
than,s heart beat; now he scratched his
head, and ever aud anon gave birth to a
pensive yawn Jonathan declared tina:
he'd as soon take thirty-nine 'stripes" as
to ask the old man; ''but," said he aloud
to himself however. "here goes it; a
faint heart never won fair gal, and adj
dressed the old man with
"I say, old man, want to marry your
daughter,
/ Old Kan-'FYou want to borrow ny
halter? Iwould loan it to you, Jonathan
but my son has taken it, and gone to the
MILL,
Jonathan Quitting his mouth close tt
the old mans ear, and speaking in deaf
ening tone)-"Pve got Ave hundred
pounds of money"
Old Mau (stepping back as if great.
alarmed, and exclaiuing, in a voice o
: surprise )-''You have Eve hundred
pounds of honey? What in the mische
can you do With SO much honey, iona
/, than? Why, it is more than the nelS
borhood has use for"
Jonathan (not yet victim CT despair
and putting his mouth to the old man
!, ear, bawled out)-',l've get g1ld.n
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
Senator Chandler SaVagely Assaulted by
Copperheads.

At supper table at the National Hotel
tonight, Senator Chandler, in conversa-
tion with DIR. Clarke, was expressing
himself freely about Yallandigham and
Copperheads generally. Mr.. Voorhees,,
of Indiana, hearing his remarks, confront
ed him, and asked if what he said was
intended for him. Mr.. Chandler replied
that he had said what he had said, and if
Mr.. V. saw fit to take it to himself he was
at liberty to do so.
He then applied some personal epithets
directly to Mr.. Voorhees, and other Cop
perheads present and interfering, where
upon one Hannegan, son of the late Sen
ator of that name, seized pitcher
from the table and threw it at Mr..
Chandler, breaking it over his head,
wounding him severely, and staggering
him so that he could not defend himself
This was followed by an attempt to
break a chair over his head-either by
Mr. Hannegan or Voorhees-it is not
certain which.
The affair was stopped by interference
of persons present, and the friends of Mr.
Chandler are in consultation as to what
course to pursue in the matter.
The successes of Grant are making the
Copperheads extremely virulent here-N
Y Tribune, 25th.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

S9 \ GoOD ONE.-In private letter
to the editor of the Washington Repubh-
can, from the army, the writer tells sto-
ry Of one of the farmers in the vicinity
of Culpepper, whose possessions lay in
district where both armies have foraged.
The old chap one day, while surveying
ruefully the streaks in the soil where his
fences once stood, remarked with much
feeling:
~ hain't took no sides in this yer re-
bellion, but I'll be dog gorned if both
sides hain't took me"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
A BELIGERENT CANINE.

y singular instance of doggish hatred
to "greybacks" is found in the case of
the slut Sally, belonging to the 10th Mas
sachusetts Volunteers. She has partici-
pated in every battle in which her regi-
ment has been engaged, and seems to take
great interest in the success of the blue
jackets, to whom she is invariably kind
and afectionate. But "greyback' is
her especial destation, which she always
exhibits by biting at them whenever they
are brought within the reach of her
chain. She accompanies the regiment
on picket but is always sufficiently dis
Greet to keep within our lines, where she
vents her rage by growing and swapping
at the enemy's skirmishers. At the bat
tie of Fredericksburg her leg was broken,
and, after the wound was dressed by some
kind-hearted surgeon, Sally returned to
the field on three legs, and doggedly re-
fused to leave until the conclusion of the
battle. This time she escaped unharmed
and is ready at any moment to partici
pate in the next engagement.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

Bg "Wife, | am to live but few
hours, at most shall soon be in heav-
en-" "You! you'll never be any nearer
than you are now, you old brute! You'd
look well stuck up in heaven-I thind |
see you now" "Dolphus, Dolphus,"
hoarsely growled the old man, "bring me
my cane, and let me larrup the old trollop
once more before [ die"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

NPA fair devotee lamented to her
confessor her love of gaining. "Ah, mad
am" replied the reverend gentleman, 'it
is a grievous sin; in the first place, con-
slider the loss of time" "That's just
what dc" said she; ''I always begrudge
the time that is lost in shutting and deal
ING"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
Protect your Trees.

The Ohio Farmer says that coal oil
has been found by accident, to be the
most effective means Of protecting fruit
trees against the ravages of the cureulio,
by placing sawdust, saturated with oil, at
the foot of the tree
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

pa.. UP4IILL.-A foppish fellow ad-
vised friend not to marry poor girl, as
he would find matrimony, with poverty,
"up-hill work"
"Good,' said his friend, II would rath-
er go uphill than down-hiH, any time"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

gsg A West Indian, who had re-
markably red nose, having fallen asleep
in his chair, negro boy who was in wait
ing observed mosquito lowering over
his face Quashy eyed it very attentive
ly. At last it hit upon his masters nose,
and instantly flew off again "Yah, yah"
he exclaimed with great glee, "me berry
glad to see you burn your fut~
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

eP At at fancy dress bill in Paris
France, recently, lady was seen in a We
ry low w-neckel dress, while foating and
waving an abundance of green gauze.--
She was politely asked by gentlemen
what she personated. "The sea, mon
sieur" ''At low tide, then, madam. -
The lady blushed and the gentleman
smiled.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

Old J{an-"So have /, Jonathan, and
il is the worst cold have ever had in
my life"
So saving. he sneezed "washup"
By this time the old lady came up, and
having observed .Jonathan's unfortunate
luck, she put her mouth to the old mans
ear. and screamed like a wounded va
hoo
Daddy, I say, daddy, you don't un-
derstand; he wants to marry our daugh-
ter"
old Nan-"I told him our calf halter
vas gone"
oil Lady-"Why, daddy, you don't
UNDERSTANDINGS got gold-he's rich
OIL lHan-"He's got cold, and the
itch. Ell? What's he doing here with the
itch, eh?"
So saying the old man aimed blow al
Jonathan's head with his walking cane
but happily for Jonathan, he lodged it
Nor did the old mans rage stop at this
but with angry countenance he made af
ter Jonathan. who took to his heels No
did Jonathan's S luck stop here; he had no
got out of the barnyard, nor far from th'
old man, who ran him close race, ere ht
stubbed his toe and fell to the ground
and before the old man could stake up,
he stumbled over Jonathan, and fel
sprawling into mud-hole. Jonathan
sprang to his feet, and with the speed 0
John Gilpin, cleared himself And poo
Sal, she died nun-never had husband
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

sa Patrick, you fool, what makes
you stale after that rabbit when your gum
has no lock on it?"-sHush-Hush Z my
darling; the rabbit don't know that,
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

s@~ When is an author most like a
Euppy? When he carries his tale with
him.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

na~ An Irishman, making love to la
dy of great fortune, told her he "could
not sleep for dreaming of her."
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

se "Where is the east?" inquired a
tutor, one day, of very little pupil =
Where the morning comes from, was
the prompt and pleasant answer.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
sTRoUDsBURG, MONROE COUNTY, PA JUNE ?, 1864

forced to leave the gun in virtual posses
sion of the enemy. He Immediately re-
ported the fact to Gen. Birney, begging
a brigade be sent out to recapture it
Capt. Butter6eld Immediately volunteered
his services, which were accepted, and,
deploying in the woods on either side of
the road, the 7th Virginia, 9Th Ohio and
l4th Indiana Regiments moved forward
Accompanied by nine men, Captain B.
moved steadily down the road, and, on
reaching the gun, endeavorcd to draw it
away. Five of the nine men were almost
instantly shot, and Capt r., procuring
five more, seized the gun and brought it
back into our lines, much to the delight
of the men of Ricketts, battery, to which
it belonged.
INCIDENTS OF HANCoCK's CHARGE.
In the terrific charge of the Second
Corps on the rebel works many grotesque
scenes occurred. A few may be interest
ing to the reader A member of the l.
rish Brigade, after the charge, was seen
making vigorous efforts to force cart
ridge into his rife, which had become
"ruled, i. e., the orifce had by constant
firing become coated with powder, render
ing the passage of the ball impossible.
Addressing his commanding officer in an
imploring tone he cried, 'Shure, Colonel,
| can't load my gun!" '"Try again" re
piled the Colonel; "try hard" He did
try again and again until the perspira-
ton stood in beads on his face, and, at
last, finding it impossible to force the
cartridge home, drew himself up erect
and brought his piece to an "order arms" /"
and with defiant look faced the enemy.
"What are you doing?" exclaimed the
astonished Colonel. "Faith,' replied the
soldier desperately, "I'm gist after wait
ing for johnny to come up till | can
knock his brains out wild me musket p
Whether his desire to annihilate the GER
ebral organ of some unfortunate "grey-
back" was gratifed the Colonel did not
remain to see.
Frequently the muskets of our men
were swept from their grasp by the lead
en- storm which was poured upon them
from the rebel line as they advanced, but,
undaunted, they still pushed forward like
a res;s.less torrent, using as their weapons
stones, broken guns, and every obtaina-
bic missile. Many who had no arms
were observed to scoop up handfuls of
thick mud and dash it into the faces of
the men in the works, who, while endeav-
oring to remove it from their eyes, found
themselves tightly grappled and march
ing toward the rear. La surrendering
many of the rebel officers stood upon the
punctilio of rank, arrogantly refusing to
deliver their swords except to officers OF
equal rank. In the confusion and fren-
zy of the charge but little attention was
paid to these small matters Of military
etiquette, and rebel captains, majors and
colonels were frequently hurried uncere
moniously to the rear by privates, hal
crazy with delight at their capture.
THE VIVANDIERE AGAIN.
The vivandiere of the Sd Michigan
Miss Annie Etheridgc, was, as usual con
spicuous for her unwearied attention tt
the wounded She participated in tht
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
THE yIVANDIERE AGAIN.

The vivandiere of the Sd Michigan,
Miss Annie Etheridgc, was, as usual con-
spicuous for her unwearied attention to
the wounded. She participated in the
charge. capturing, it is said, several pris-
oners, and during the fight remained on
the field exposed to the enemy's fire, at
tending to the wounded. Her many acts
Of devotion to the wounded have secured
for her the respect and esteem of the regi.
ment and division to which she is at
ached
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

sv Love, well understood, is wisdom.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02
REcAPTURE OF A GUN

Captain L. W Butterfeld, A. ]. G., Of
Carroll's brigade, deserves special men
ton for the recapture of gun taken by
the enemy in the first days battle in the
Wilderness. The lieutenant In charge of
the gun, which was posted down the
plank which cuts the Brock road at right
angles, having lost almost every man, was
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1864-06-02

Old -Nan-"So have /, Jonathan, and
IL is the worst cold have ever had in
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11
U. s. 1910 BONDS.

]. ). 1910 BONDS.
Under INSTRUCTIONS FROM THE
~ - Secretary of tho Treasury of the United
NRST NATIONAL BANK OF DAVENPORT,
has been authorized to receive sub,orl tons 10 the
National Ten-Forty Lear.
Por the subscriptions to this oan, bonds will be
i-sued Of the following denomi nations eos, 1Ooe.
50Vs and 1000s, resistered, with coupons attach
ed, a. may be preferred by subscribers.
rhese bonds nse reieenn.b'e by the Government
10 eofa nfer ten and pay able forty years from dsts.
They bear fUeper cent isierest. payabi On bonds
not over oHe hundred dollars snnualy, and on
boads over one hundred dollars semi, annual y, In
coin.
DEPOSIT, must be made in Lega, Tender notes Of
the United ates, or in National Bonk Note
Currency. subscribsrs wi no irf.ress from
tAe day The money is deposited nth this Bank I'd
the bonds Will oe dehrered a. the eEpsnss of the
Coupon bonds are now ready for delivery, and
Reg stored bonds will te on the Let Of May neat.
w act of Congress- the issue Of these bonds 10
limited TO
TWO HUNDRED MILLIONS OF DOL.
LARS,
An amount which viii soon be absorbed II We may
judge Of the prev success e similar appeals ny
the severn .ent to the loyal peopie Of this conn
try. These boz do
Are Exempt from All Kinds Of Taxa.
zion,
and effsi better induoeme to TO capitalists than any
security Of pu,hc or rivate CT sracter now offer
i.gSt ar
marslhf
Hx.Dou ,RrtRs ROCK IsLAxD BAKa.o,st
HOOK isL Asp. IiA, A ri III. lset.
foer OapER o. Is.
l. All psrsons residlng on or in the vicinity Of
thts 1s;snd are warned against carrying sodiers or
other persons Il boa,s = or from the liant.
No bats arc allowed IN land ~ ~ -
-. 100 OF the
Il and unless the owners thereof have
Pes. from these headq aarters giving them permis.
sion ~ to do.
An, violation Of these orders will entail on the
person or persons 20 doing coma cation of their
boats, il aeeorda % with Instructions received
from W a. Dspar, ment
AL % a. ci,ix.ns will uudsrsts and the importance
Of having this pos Isolated from the surrounding
country. and a ready and willing compliance with
,his order 10 earnestly requested.
Nv orcer of A. J. Johnson,
s Col an Rest v. R. O., Comdg. Post.
A. r. HIoos Let It. and Post Adjt. 5
N -
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11

1A10808Uf, 80.
- 000aAA1v u0xs ~ 1865,
- ooo1oop es1inD ~ NV
baags esseposds = 6ellsUss
s...>>.s..>ss. .....e.9e An.
esss.ssss sees ssss sUseV u -
Osvsspsst daily, ossdAys ea-

-S2ysooo a.. ....e....~.>>>.. ~ A. Il
.sily e9cso1 nd nail 1g16a 49,. .e.o6 ?. =.
All e1aAa6ss oAises1oDesst1 disoss eenaenSsa
eSOAienOo M te1ios evoe betA Ne ASealene
YeatAse1s 0lsAA0ea Csot1l, HtAeeefg, -
Weyne6ea1 0Ale6p RAilruad 70 aad isoo D.
0oee, Teao1ob Osl9Abus, llevs1as1s Ctnsinnoo
Hteeeaek D0aAisA, Da16ls, Nia9ara Ralles ABB
~, NsWIsshs PAil6AslpAia, Bai1nWs ~ WssA.
fasssnse - sauinAeA u Ne sesessity =
01vfnG 11Dooot o1fouo1ons - - Ne 1esuneasaS
eAsii eeOUnge, Alee epeosase tickets ssesee se.'
oag their oees In tho esss - ehe ss0dustcse sole
ct faros ealy - stations % The line q be Oh
oaRo aai Reok lslAad ksiisoad.
JOHN r. TRACY. Superintendent.
Davonpoet New. 10. 101o. d0
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11
MAN tsOOD!

ND TIE y1gOR OF YOUTH RE TORE
~ in four we.k-, bv DR. kl OkD'> 8 EHCE
OF LIFE. ur. ticord of Par :, aft Year, u
en- nest solicitation mas It eng 10 edea to
urgent n a ,eet,i the men -An pubsie. .na p
poi ted o.. Aged, in Nee MA, tor be sale u his
valued md nighiy p,,sea Ess ne Vi lie 1h,.
y - den nj ape 4 y r,st re N n2'.d tv The mos,
sh II sssa constitutions, IN totr weeks AMI a.
led A-c6r lug ~ p'sn,sd n.''u til ., tai 70
i'm usssbls Tits ute sertmiIg Msis ~ uid
70 ken = al -b.u. - ~. ~. = l,s IT. c,s sss
persn net {. >uc.~ts. ~ every sa-s is eritsin.
"a. kicusS = t..ssLce 81 Lne - soid ia cases,
with tult ipstsartutbs ~ u.e. o. - Or 70 ausp.
ti,iss il oes f.s - AID viii sent To any uass
70 uiiy psoked. % rsos,ps % rsmis,soes 70 hss
aecr~di,"d sosat Circular ssptilss - {. cs,ps ol
: tOnr aee0pa
Phi ZIP kOLAN ~ Broome street, N
nshS-SAs ldsss west = bf.aAwsy, NY.
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11

4 feO4lD rv0Np6so-A W00oo Wooti
- 0oc8 ~ OoOol q 0ao who a.
bson A0og.
There 10 young married woman 10
| the city, snaeivo of The Cantoa Of Bere
6sitse'ls0d, who is afflicted with . dis
ease which she calls ~ dancing Of the
heart" and which the physicians pro
nounce incurable. She hss . female friend
who was afflicted nth similar disease,
and vas cured by tying around her nick
piece Of roap that had been used 10
hanging criminal TIE lady with the
"dsDcing heart" firmly belives that she
con Be cured:by drinking few drops Of
the blood Of man who has been cxecut-
ed 10 similar manner.
Her name is Elizabeth Nund, and she
istwenty three years Of age, and has been
the mother OF three children, none Of
whom survive. She has made numerous
applications At the Jail to inquir when
there would bean execution, aud ~ there
has been DO case Of capital punishment
at that institution. for several months,
her desira for human blood has not been
gratiied. - yesterday morning, while we
we're conyer slug with Captain B,shoo, the
the jailor, a, the office Of the Jail. Mrs
Mnnd came 10 with = smiling counter
ance, and inquired when the execu ion
would take place. She heard that john
Absbire sentenced by court martial to. be
hung by the neck, vas to be executed in
the jail yard ON the 18th nit, as it was
stated in the paper. The execution Of the
sentence, however, was suspended until
application could be male 10 the Presid.
ent for communication to imprisonment for
life, and on being informed that the man
was not to be hung, Mrs. Mund appeared
to be greatly disappointed and chagrined
Capt. Bishop cheered her dropping
spirit., however, by telling her, 10 the
smoothest German he could com msnJ,
that on the fifteenth OF April a man would
be hung by the neck until he was "dead
dead, Dead, and that she might then ap
pear and obtain does of the blood OF
Valentine Hansen, the murderer, provi.
ded Gov Hall did not pardon or respite
the criminal and the physician would
allow her to extract the curatine fluid.
With this pleasing assurance, Mrs. Mund
took her departure, greatly consoled
With the hope that her heart would soon
dance its last quadriI in consequence Of
The miraculous power Of few drops of
Hansen's blood. This is courteous case
OF modern superstilion.-iH Louis Dem
ocrut.
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11
Third Edi ion, 5Oth Thousand
NEooD.,

/, TREATISE On SEMINAL WLAk MIA
IA Involuntary knissiopr, Men,ai and Ii .iss
lncspacity. Loss Of Power: Premature .ec.y. la
pediments to N .rriage. Nervous Dsbllit,, Sci
anne Sexu i Diseases, DC, &c.
Nv noBr. T.. BILL. v. D., member Of the Roy il
c. i:cge Of Surgeons. IL ndon " pages. Price u
THIS book should be read BY every ono, Az
part c.ls.ly BY those arriving 1t Mani ood u
cont aims in por ant advice to a,l ami the me ne
cure 70 the afflicted Is plainly set 10th. 4 ma
.c,ea ..vass.ds ROW a H.. .. -sss.r,.
,ent ~pder .ea.ed envelope, " maii, ne
eli, o, toe none, VI postage -tsnps, W
tt,kiAA d d.. e-ssr--i. ex i0r
Ntl.h ss,nt. '"veJp5ff
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11


FOs RATS, Msce, koaches. 4 ats, Bed
.ugs, Moths tn Fu:s. Wooisas, &c. insects on
iants, Fowls, Apinals, -.
ut mp in 25c, Ste an, 81 Boxes, BOTTLES and
tasks. IS and s. sises for Hotels, Publie Inssi.
utisns, c. Ass
Only infallable remedies knOvo."
Stree from rois.ns"
"Not dangerous " the Human rauily.
Rats come out Of their holes to de-"
y Sol Who'll sale ii all large ties.
= sold ~ all Drssgssss and Ret ,ilsss every.
where - I
<ll! BswA1s / II 81 Al Worthless imi atioaA.
= Ace ID i t'o.f. ~" name - eseh Beg, bot
0s and FlaAk be .rs pa bpy.is ~ - 5
ileas ADDRESS f3ENst 4. COScAi.
Prtreipal Depet : kreaA say n. +.
- Sold BY a,gsTt4 M
whole6sls ssd Rss.ti Agest,
jaae-d8w1 uosespee9 .oWa.
Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1864-04-11

zsssss swa BY OAieeoe ttass, ssASeA = ssstvs sta
Ssss tester thsa Dsssxpevt tisss.
nN AND AFTER MONDAY, NOV. 18th
" 1858, aa6 anul furtAss n0eies, pssssngss
trains will isavs Davenport - follows
500 4. 4. Tor 0rinnsli ssd Washington,
400 ?. \. fos lsws City aaA Aussailas.
ssArss AaarvS AZ DAvsxfoRr a voLIovs.
500 ?. =. from 0sinnsll sad Washington.
BIS ?. 4. from 0rinasll and Museatine.
The S.0OA train out Of Davsnpoft mAkssdirsct
eo0nse,ioas q 0rinnsli, lowe city and washiae
81 With she Western Stage Csmpany stages Tor
III points West, 6oash- vest and North west.
Trains trom fho Wess eonnees - Davenport
With trains Of the Ohisago and Rock Island Rail
kosd for Ill points East, North and south.
PssssAeoes ~ femindod Of the necessity Of
giving distiaet difestions - 70 Ii dsstinsson Of
ehsi' aae n psosus saiskats baeose takias
sheh seass = sho o.AfS.
JOHN T.TRACY, 0sa1 Ssp't.
4. KrMIALI, ASA Hup't.
Davenport. Nov. Is. Is01.-dtf