Daily national Republican. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1862-1866, 1864-02-17
THE sArIN,s AND DoIN's OF josh
BILLINGS.



Perkins.-1 haV red yurs peace, on "Wim-
Minis Ritter" thru and thru, ana must say that
iluv 1t. In mi opinyun, wimmin has rite tu
dew emmy thing we'll, but saw wood; sawin'
wood, amt their stilo; speshially II the saw
buk IL high one, 1t must NORTH them the
wust wa. ..."
Harold.-Yure gcdhs IL not fully born yet,
whcnit gifts born think yu vii be . poeck.
Yu hav got magnesium enuH teW keep a
livery stable. Yure landguage In a leetle 10
Horid; did you ever travel In Floridaf Tn agin
Il motifs one ofyure lines, haE 10 feet into II,
and the next one, haZ onlytgot feet, six inches
Jist six inches short. Sum poiks air born, and
sum are manufactured; the manufactured ones,
are the moste std dyest, tina amt 90 op teu
banker after mint juleps. Yu ought to 20 up
garrett when yu yraktiS, moste avl good poec-
kry haz bin rit up garrett.
Absolum.-Yure letter came salt tn hand.
In repli beg leaf tn staff, that | am not the
Edditur, think the edditur. IL he war tew hum
wud Civ w employment. Tho sample ofyour
style, which yu enkloEe, Is smoothe. Yu are
evidentla slippery writer. Thare IL . great
demand, jist now for contributors; thares the
sanitara fund and the kontraryband fund, and
the Gen. Mcclellan pus fund, and The Turin
mission, and the pints, and bread for ireland
and pasiick rsle rode stok and swords for
Brgadeer Genrals, and soup for the surfing,
ana the taxes; yu had better cum rite on, yu
f1lla yures-J. B.
Milo.-Nex week, We shall give yurs cent?.
ments on Goff to the publik. l think list ed.
zackly az yu dew John b. Gof, IL huge on
lektur. he haz got the art oS motionlng on
what he sez and what he don't sa. He wud ha'
made fust rate theater. One ov his lektur
wud read q good deal, Ito q man who didn
understand musik), like the notes oV yanke
doodle. Yu kant reduse what he ser tew ri
Ing, emmy more than yu kan pla sky rockt OF
juise harp. Yu never saw emmy thing b
ever ced In a nuZepaper' a reporter mite n
wei undertake tew rite up the report ov a
shooter, az tew report him. Kant inform yu
credibly, how mulch mummy he haL maid
lekturing, awl ikan ga IL II he gets 5000
mite, and textures 500 mites In year,
amounts tew $50, 900 annooaly. kant inforI
yu tew ded sertaintee, whether he In marie
or notj II he IL mArid III bet q setin ov her
eggs that a kurtain lektur in that famille
wouldn't pa for the advertising.
HARD RoAD.-Yure essa hRE sum good hi
into It, but IL not jis the thing for a rellgI
nuzepaper, like ours send II tn "Wllk'
Spirit, paper that knows how tn talk hos
will merely SUCCESS, that pedigree liz not In
portant for q fast trottlng boss; II he kan trt
last, never minde the pedigree. Thare IL
crate menny fast men, even, who hail
got no pedigree. ThAre Amt much art
driving a trottlng hoes, )ist hold them bu
hard, and hollel them ahead hard, tina
awl. A hoss will trot the fastest down hill, Q
peshila, If the brlching brakes. Kuller Is /
kriterion. hay seen awful mean bosses, {
awl kullers, excep green, never Gee q mei
one ov this kuller. Hoses lIv teW an honar
bill old age, and have oftin seen them, tn
appeared fully prepared for deth. Heathir
are alwus kind tew bosses; II IL only amuu
christian people, that a hoss haE tew trot
mile heats, in a hot da, for t25 900 In kounte
Ut mummy.