, 1864-08-19
d NUMBER SO.

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FANNY FERN Fanny Fern is the wife
James Parton, Esq, once editor of the Home
Journal, and since author of various popular
biographies She is also the sister Of Willis,
and by her he had pen and ink portrait drawn
in such accurate though startling colors, that
the likeness has since been vivid in the public
mind. Fanny can be seen on Broadway almost
any day. with her daughter, and often accompa-
MED by a negress, bearing the child of another
now deceased, who was the wife Of that ioyial
Bohemian known as "DOesticks." Fannyis not
young now-wrinkles have ruthlessly intruded
into her brow and cheeks, and the sedateness of
maturity is becoming more and more apparent
in all her actions. She has a pale complexion
tinged to a yellow, and light, wavy hair She
moves with brisk step, with rapid and gene
raj observation of everything about her, and
face animated and pleasant To Judge her by
her writing she is q rough, boisterou5 mascu-
line creature, with very iitte OF tila woman, and
a very great deal Of the tiger. To appreciate
her as she is, as the wife, mother and friend,
she must be regarded as truly amiable affec-
tionate, and devoted woman, and the light Of
cultivated, joyous home. She has a style of
blunt bitter, Independent writing, that has made
her literary name and money besides but her
personal characteristics much more accep-
table to taste and conducive to esteem. You
had better not tread on her toes however She
knows her rights, and dares maintain them. In
fact, she is the woman until it is necessary to
act the man. and then her tongue and pen be-
come thunderbolts Of wrath.-,SUaday Mercury.
KISSING IN THE UNITED STArEs.-When wild
lark attempts to steal kiss from a Nantucket
girl she says, HCome sheer off or l II split your
mainsail with a typhoon." The Boston girls
hold still until they are kissed, when they flare
up and say, 1 think you ought to be ashamed"
Boston Transcript.
When young chap steals a kiss from an Ala
bama girl, she says, 81 reckon it's my time now"
and gives him box on the ear that he don't
forget in a -IraointoR Herald
When a clever fellow steals kiss from
Louisiana girl, she smiles bushes deeply, and
says nothing. We think our girls have more
taste and sense than those Of down east and AL
ALBANIA. When a man is smart enough to steal
the divine luxury from them, they are perfectly
satisfed-N. O. Picayune.
When a female is saluted here with a buss
she puts on her bonnet and shawl, and answer
eth thus 'I am astonished at thy assurance,
Jeddiah; for this indignity will sew thee up"
Lynn Record.
The ladies in this village receive a salute
with Christian meekness: they follow the Scrip
ture rule-When smitten on the one cheek they
turn'the other also.-BungtoOn Chronicle.
When a Bergen girl gets kissed she very
cal mly remarks, 'Hans, tat ish good;" and
when Block Island girl receives a buss, she
exclaims with considerable animation, ''Well
John you've wiped my chaps off beautiful. -
~ Y. EOening Star. alsI
And when fellow steals kiss here, from
rosy lips, the fair one exclaims, "get out and
don't be jumping my tunnel. '-Old Piute.
Len F-l'e-'-- glr. ,-,44s -Ka-al sI.o s,s-
uIug Dug anxiously waits FOR anC.hers-C
fornia Express.
We have never heard of such thing as kisses
being stolen from the girls Of this section, and
they positively deny the soft impeachment"
though their lips not unfrequently bear the i'm
print Of the chaps.
"BoB," now called Belmont Bob is the body
servant of Gen. McOlernand, and at the battle
of Belmont, it is said Of him, that when the re-
treat commenced, he started for the boats
Reaching the banks he dismounted, and slid rap
idly down, when an officer seeing the action,
called out, "stop, you rascal and bring along
the horse" Merely looking up as he waded to
the plank through the mud, the darkey replied,
"Can't 'bey Colonel told me to save the most
valuable property, and dis niggers worf MORN
a horse"
A MODEL PIECE OF CALIco.-'Did you not say,
Ellen, that Mr.. B. is poorP Yes, he has
only his profession will your uncle favor his
suitp NO. and l can expect nothing from him.
Then, Ellen, you viii have to resign fashio1i-
able society mo matter, shall see the moro
Of Fred You must give up expensive dress
ooh, Fred admires simplicity you cannot
keep carriage But we can have delightful
walks You must take a small horse and fur
nish it plainly yes, for elegant furniture
would be out Of place in a cottage you will
have to cover your floors with cheap, thin car
pet 'Oh, then l shall hear his step the sooner.
LET HIM PAss-A young man recently pre-
sented himself for examination as Assistant En-
gineer in the navy. Among other questions
the following was asked him: Suppose you
had built engine yourself, performing every
part of the work without assistance, and knew
that it was in complete order, but when put into
vessel the pumy would not draw water what
would you do The young man promptly re-
piled. should 60 to the side of the vessel
and ascertain if there was any water in the
river Guess they let him pass
GENIUS AND MEDtooRIrY.- Each of us has his
or her own nature, and the uses harmonious to
that natures idiosyncrasy. The world would
get on very i'll without persons of practical COM
mon sense and active usefulness Yet every
one is not therefore to be condemned who is not
of this type, and who is not, in the popular ac-
ceptation, "practically useful" The of
mediocrity are for everyday life and the uses
Of genius, amidst a thousand mistakes which
mediocrity never commits, are to suggest and
perpetuate ideas which raise the standard Of tho
mediocre to a nobler level. There would be
fewer good men Of practical sense were there
no erring dreamers Of genius.
FLATrERY-It is easy to tell when others are
fattered, but not when we ourselves are, and
every man and woman will lend firm belief to
the soft nothings of the very man they believe
to be an arrant fatterer when others are in the
case.
The man who builds and lacks wherewith to
pay, provides a house from which to run away.
A sailor is not sailor when he is aboard a
sailor is not a sailor when he is ashore; but he
must be either ashore aboard therefore, a
sailor is not sailor.