Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1864-07-05
Items Of all Sorts


The Round Table thinks lady at presen
prices Is luxury too great for an ordinary MAJ
} to contemplate the figures attached plainly t,
8 hef making.up and adornments, would frighter
any man who did not possess u printing pres
OF hs own that could turn out an unlimited
number Of greenbacks.
REsiGNArIoN A suffering but godly man wa
once asked II he could See any reason for ths
dlspensatl0n which has caused him no much az
ony. " No, replied he - but | AIN just as
well satisfied US 1t | could SEE ten thousand
Gods will is the perfection Of all reason. -
| Spring.
A Notary has forwarded to the Bank OF
France brick with l000i nots glued on it
which has been paid and will be kept ldthe Bank
Museum OF Curiosities lthad been fteen years
glued on the wall Of u peasants house, and con-
sIdered as pict rial curiosity by the man who
| iound IT, gnd did not know its value
Ambition often puts men to doing the mean
est Offices
The London Spectator critcises the school girls
OF England. After noticing the failures at some
school examination at Cambridge it adds: The
gltls made no attempt at all in general to explain
the meaning or reason of the rules--in short
they know little Of ciphering and nothing OF
arithmetic. This is exactly what we might ex
pect. Girls need the logic Of mathematics
more and like it less thanany other study Their
minds are strategical. They Ike 10 turn he flank
Of dDcuity, mol 10 fight H."
A Western Court has decided that kiss is q
valid consideration, and forced an old bachelor
t. redeem the promise made to a pretty maiden
that he would give Der pony for kiss. lie
bad tried to crawl out Of his bargain.
II s said that when President Lincoln began
the work OF filling himself up with the good
things OF the table at the Philadelphia Fair, he
exclaimed "I'll fight it out ON this line il it
takes oil summer"
When you do a thing do it thoroughly. When
you break up an establishment, dismiss every.
body. We are glad to SOC that the following
advertiser is u root and branch man, aud oD
abandoning house keeping, not only gets rid OF
bis WIFE, but suggests satisfactory arrangement
for the lady's future life:
A GENTLEMAN, who is breaking up his estab-
llshment, has very great pleasure in RECON-
hENDlHG bis CoAcHMAN and WIFE the former to
take charge Of the stable and drive and the
latter as Dairy woman, or to take charge OF
poultry, or both duties combined. Address, &c
Except that If he were really gentleman be
would have mentioned the lady before the me
nal, we think this advertiser model Of thought
\ Larry do ha E,ll 10 III
brooks y. $. Mail F" man called at our gen.
eral delivery one day, when ! happened for a
moment to be engaged elsewhere IN the Office
lie wbistled loudly. | stepped to the window
and savagely inquired, Whose dog he was
whlstling Tor One of Uncle Sans pups"
said he, quite composedly. had nothing to say.
Soon after the death OF the poet Wardsworth,
u man met farmer oilhe neighborhood, and said
to him "You have had great loss. "Whst
loss2' Why you have lost the great poet"
- o ay, said the farmer, he 10 dead, but
hey no doubt { wife III carry ont business, and
make it ~ profitable as ivcr it was.
A transparent Hibernan wanted friend TO
discount a note II | advance this, said the
ender, +" will you pay your note puuctually "
i will, ON my honor, replied the other, " the
Expense OF the protest and oil. v
The Chattanooga Gazette says that "a Yam
KEGS chief nerve OF feeling is in his pocket"
A rebel is more apt 10 fecl in his neighbor's
pocket, replies the Louisville Journal.
A Hartford fisherman was asked the other
lay during the drouth) if the Connecticut river
. loU Inu 2 ha G.ha
rolling quld Of tobacco in his cheek q" guess
you'd think so, if you'd seen what Isaw yester-
lay" What wasit?" asked the questioner.
. Why, replied the other, " saw couple Of
uckers lightering a shad over the bar"
ADulchman describes New York a, berry
Inc people, who 20 apout der streets schesting
ach other and dey call dat pizEinese.
The following is said to bo recorded in an
rish graveyard
Here lies the body Of John Mound.
Lost at sea and never found.
A wag seeing a lady at party with q very
Dw. necked dress and bare arms, expressed his
by saying that she out.strippsd tho
ghole party. .....
SUBJECT FOR a LKcrrRK subject Of
oung lady who recently leetured st Portsmouth,
I. H., was, f" Whom shall marry"
A CuPpERHEAD WELL AsswERED.--ln the cars.
he other day between Baltimore and Washing
On, discussion sprang up 81 to the propriety
I allowing negroes TO vote. One Of the cop
erbead participants thinking to make out q
lain case by the angamentnm dd hominsm, said
D his Republican antagonist /" What would
GU think if, at the next election, you were
) 20 to tho polls aud cast a vote for George B.
ieCellan and a big black niger were to come
p alongside Of You and cast one for Abe Lin
Dln
The Republican reflected little and replied
Well Ia think the niger had DIN sigh.
,ore sense than had.
CorroS. Fanny Fern, who ought to know.
lys, spcaking.of cotton. The ladies as we all
now owe something OF their angelic symmetry
, the pure aud delicate Southern staple. Of