Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1864-05-12
pend-Letter once sale

EeRd-Letter Once sale
During the past week the United States
Dead Letter Office has had q public suc
ton of the various articles which have
accumulated in that strange repository Of
odds snd ends connected with the Post
Office Department. The catalogue, issued
| previous to the sale, consists Of ten close
ly printed pages. These things have, to
quote the language Of the advertisement,
accumulated in the Dead Letter Office
since 1859 1.-THE Department having used
every effort to find the propsr owners, and
being unable to so do), and are now to be
sold, the proceeds, il sny, after paying
charges, TO DC deposited in the United
States Treasury, subject to order, should
the proper owners hereafter be found"
They generally sold well, and though
many an anxious lover waits lsnguishing-
" for the souvenir Of undying affection
from his Dulcines-nOw alas worn upon
the bosom of some unfeeling stranger
yet Uncle Sam cannot be blsmed for it.
Why didn't they write more plainly; ad-
dress their billet douz properly, send the
precious paper before John, or Joe, or
"Jeems" left the neighborhoOd, blissfully
ignorant Of the present awaiting them,
and thinking only of the future. Our
Uncle" though not he Of The "Three
Golden Balls" has had somewhat Of q
pswnbrOker's experience in selling of old
"trsps"
Amongst the noticeable items Of the cat
slogue we observe "One Key Of Heaven" ("
but whether metallic OF otherwise is not
stated Also "TWo Paths to Paradise"
probably the same mentioned in the Bible,
I" One Way Of Life, though in Washing
ton we have many; Four lntercessory
Prayers" "0De Germany Pilgrimage TO
Zion, "0ne Golden Legacy" the pauVre
Giable for whom it was intended has prob
ably been drafted; young Parson."
Fancy the sale at suction of such mir is
terial personage who perhaps had no par
sonage, and thus drifted or went over to
the Office of defunot epistles, and thus be-
came man Of (desd) letters. Eeglsieseaf
Some thoughtful friend had also mailed
one set of teeth, to some toothless dear,
still "chewiug, &C., sweet and bitter fan
cy, SC" Another had sent also by.mail,
"one blscksmith's rssp," also, zone srti-
foisl eye" " tone worked paddle" proba-
bly, dead Irishm n i " "one black ditto"
shl if that should be g real contrabsndl
" one smuslin night gown" oh myI how
could they2 and "oDe up-housewife,"
furnished with pins, needles and scissors"
"a fine chance for some enterprising
young man or buttonless bachelor.
Shoulder-strsps are in abundance, almost
equsling Willsrd's; and blue military
coats are even sent by mail, together with
/" one looking glass and razor" thus fur
nishing subjects Of grave reflection among
the dead letters.
On the eleventh page of the catalogue
we see advertised, probably for aristo-
crstic sinners, of Christians of of esthetio
tendencies, zone gilt-edge Key to Heaven
also, "Two Young Sinners, who seem to
be very near the above mentioned Key,
I" Nursery Trees" pocket Bibles, and
"Family Pray appear to be in close
connection, and gold watches, silver watch
es and brass watches, with their hands be-
fore their faces, keep time to 4" eight sheets
Of band music Bottles Of snuff, flannel
shirts, black felt hats, and one pair Of
long boots seem to have been sent to ex-
pecting friends by some who loved them
(AhNmy Matilda Jane y, and mittens,
though given, never came to hand, while
F" one elegant engagement ring" now
keeps other engagements and gleems on
alien fingers. AS Smithee says, with
charming originality, Such is life"
S)