The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1864-05-11
THE UNION and REBEL GENERALS.
A RECREATION ON NAMES.

| CELEBRITY is considered big thing in war
So is promptness. We believe there il
only one General in the Southern army wht
always gets up Early, albeit there was one
that resigned, who was habitually Pryor it
rising. Though the Rebel officers are rath
er noted for rapid movements, there ar,
two decided Folks among them, and on,
who is continually Cumming. yet does no
come along.
! But we have Slocum ourselves, anC
though we may have a General Hunt after
the Rebels, some of our commanders, in
cluding the old Hunter himself, occasion
ally fails 10 bag the rascals, seeing which
General Ketchum ought to resign, unless
he can prove that he knows Howe. BY
hanging on the enemy's rear, it seems tc
us, that General Hindman, at least, ough,
to be caught.
This war has brought forward, more OF
less conspicuously, several military names
There are Pickett OF Virginia, Battle o.
Tennessee, and Slaughter of Alabama, or
the Rebel side Phifer would do to put in
the band, and Field isn't inappropriate for
| a scene Of operations. Steele is not so bad
either, and we find Steele common to both
armies. There is no use for Shields in our
modern warfare, at any rate since the
Shenandoah Valley campaign Of 1862
though the Rebels continue to employ
Archers.
Mountainous as some parts Of the South
are, there are two Hills down there tina,
seem to be particularly hard to get over,
and Breckinrdge. Dense Forests, heavy
Woods, and difficult Rhodes are occasion.
ally to be seen. Boggs and Brooks diver
sify the prospect, though it must be stated
that the latter are not produced by Rains
Of North Carolina, and Of course not by the
Rains that fell at Stone River We don't
know much about the Rebel Lane, bot are
advised that this is different from the fa-
nous Long street How long that is we
are not apprised, though we have seen the
mention of Miles. In our army we have
no General Hills. We have a Meade, a
Parke, Woods, Brooks, and Tower
the latter, however, not remarkable tall
There is no whisky in the Southern army,
owing, We suppose, to the difficulty o. pro-
curing that article There is, however, or
lately was, Kimmel and whatever ale can
be got out Of Adams AS to our own army,
t ,ough we keep Butler, we don't indulge
in anything stronger than Meade There
is Porter on the list, though he is out at
present. This refers to the Andrew brand
Fitz John (not Demi;john) Porter, the ad-
ministration swore off from in November
1862. What with the laws of Congress in
regard to the abolition Of sailors grog, and
Gen. Grants temperance order in the army
of the Potomac, We may perhaps look for
the total abstinence some Of these days.
George Washington Morrell is one of our
Brgadier Generals We wish all Brigader
Gen, rals-and Major Generals, too, for
that matter-were as moral as George
Washington.
As the rebels seem to have thrown the
Lees Of their society into the war, the
mechanics and tradespeople are not remark.
ably we'll represented. There are two
Coopers, a Gardner, q Leadbeater and a
Taylor or two. The rebels have their
Parsons and we have our Pope. The only
working men represented among our Gen.
erals are the Potters and Taylors, always
excepting the Smiths, and the Confederates,
by the way, have them too.
We don't see how the enemy can want
food as long as they have Hogg, Mouton,
and Greens. On the other hand, if we
ever should get out Of beef, we can fall
back on our Viele. We hear that Gen.
Pike, who resigned the Confederate service
some time ago, is making overtures for
pardon. His case will probably be turned
over to Provost Marshall General Fry.
There has been great deal of talk about
National Banks, carried on through the
Treasury Department. 1t will not, how
ever, escape notice that the War Depart
ment also has its National Banks located in
Louisiana and Texas.
If the Administration fails to put down,
cut to pieces, and bore out this rebellion, it
will not be for want of tools. We have
Sickles and we have Shears, nor must We
forget the old Barlow. We don't just now
remember much that has been done by our
Augur, but We have had several that would
not bore. We might make some sharp re
mark about General Blunt, but punning
disagrees with US.
The rebels have a General named Trim
bic. He must be a relative Of our General
Rckets. They also have a General With
ers; We hope he will be wrung. "Let the
CALLED jade vince" General Wise is well
known Confederate. We can beat that :;
We have General Solomon. There is, We
believe, only one General Cheatham in the
enemy's forces by name, though large
number in point Of fact. We are AFRAID
there rs more than one General Hooker in
the Federal ranks.
The Confederates say they arc fighting
for their homes. Until recently Holmes
was fighting for them, but none to hurt
jeff Davis has just put Price on Arkansas
land, but We reckon Red river will run
redder yet if he stays in that vicinity
They say the stream is coming up by its
Rains, and the latest quotations reported
Steele going down.
They have General in the South
named Corse. He had better go to
Tpombs.
The Secesh have buried two Garnetts.-
The Federals have brilliant Stone yet above
ground.
To US it has always seemed singular that
Briggs and Vessels should not be in the
navy. Well, let that pass. 1t is a matter
for Welles.
The Rebel army is bad off for shoes
Part Of it was at one time Frost Bitten
orr army might be able to get along with
out Schurz.
We have Couch and the enemy Pill
low. If they were together, we reckon the
former would be on top.
Oh, pshaw This is all nonsense; let's
quit.-No. Republican.