Mineral Point weekly tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1859-1868, 1863-12-09


To day viewed the battlefield, which ex-
tends for six miles along Mission RIDGE and
for several miles on Lookout Mountain
Probably not so well directed. 81. well orr
dered battle has been delivered during the
But one assault was repulsed, bur that
assault by calling to that point the rebel re-
serves prevented them repulsing any of the
others
A few DAYS since, Bragg sent to General
Grant flag of truce advising him that It
would be prudent to remove any non-combat-
ants who might be still in Chattanooga, no
reply has been returned, but the CONTESTANTS
having removed from this vicinity it is prob
able that On-combatants can remain without
imprudence. sE#
NJ I. MEIGs, Quartermaster General.
Miscellaneous Items.
-Canon-izing man appears TO signify
making big Snn of him.
/ g = g Too big for his business as the LADY
said to the sweep stuck in the chimney
The largest specimen of the gull tribe
The great Mo-gul of course.
= Joke by London Osler-yep \ ,orss
neighs, it is because he wishes to make the
acquaintance of other 'orses in the neighbor-
hood
The individual who attempted to raise
colts from horsechestnuts went into the mar
ket the other day, and inquired for a mock
turtle, to make mock-turtle soup of
= The moment fly gets into your ink
stand he becomes an ink-wisitor (inouisitorl
The author of the above atrocity has left for
the sources of the Nile
=" Sally" said fellow to a girl who had
red hair, " keep away from me or you'll set
me on fire" mo danger of that" replied
Sally, you are too green TO burn"
= Which asks agricultural chap, is the
queen of the roses in the garden and al.-
swerS, the rose OF the watering-pot, for it
rains over all the others.
Cold water ought never to be drank with
IN half ar hour of eating. 1t diiutes the gas
trie juice and reduces its temperature and
thus retards digestion and Injuries health.
= Each day brings its own duties and car
ries them along with it and they are as
waves broken on the shore, many like them
coming after, but none ever the same.
There are moments when the two worlds,
the earthly and spiritual, sweep by near TO
each other, and when earthly day and heay-
enly..night touch each other in twilight.
: Madness, like epilepsy, gives more pain
to the spectator than the performer; for it is
only an earlier death, longer dream, day
walking instead of night-walking
"A contemporary says the famous saving of
VIII Shakespeare, that there is a divinity that
shapes our ends, is exemplified IN the employ
ment of pretty girls in Massachusetts who are
making gentlemen's boots.
"A writer in the Lonlo,e Times, giving q
biographical sketch of the late Lord Iynd-
hurst, said that, great as he was, he bowed
before the greatness of the Supreme BeingH'
W hat considerable condescensionl
=" My brethren" said Swift in sermon,
there are three sorts Of pride-of birth, of
riches, and of talents. / shall not now speak
of the latter, none of you being liable to that
abominable vice"
A physicians horse being out of order,
he sent him to the tarrier to be cured which
being done, the doctor went to pay him.
/" No." said the farrier, "we doctors nevesr
take any money one of another"
Your wife's fat, but she's not handsome,
Smith" Well, Jones, that's expressing
your opinion plump and plain, anyh0w.' You
are right, Smith, that's exactly my notion;
she's very plump and very plain"
= Mrs. Darlington remarked the other day
that she had a resentment that She should
eventually die IN a prance; adding that the
resentment troubled her good deal but thai
she expected to finally get immured to it,"
The joke of Punch of brushing hair by
machinery, which looks like no Joke to the
patronize1, is really stern fact, as such IA
machine Is IN operation at a famous hair
dresser's in London.
Men who succeed in removing wants
from creation, falsehoOds from our memory,
and disgraces from our nature, are to the
realms of truth what the heroes of mythology
are to the primitive world-they lessen tho
number of monsters on the earth.
At a christening, while a minister was
making the certificate, he forgot the date,
and happened to say, "Let me see, this is the
30ta. The thirtieth," exclaimed the in-
dignant mother; " indeed it is only the eIev-
enth."
A man in the habit of travelling, COM
planning to friend that he had often been
robbed, and was afraid of stirring abroad, was
advised 10 carry pistols with him on his jour
ney. ooh, that would be worse, " replied the
hero; ''tLe thieves would rob me Of them
also"
REASONABLE Plea Judge said to a to-
per on trial for drunkenness:
" Prisoner, you have heard the prosecutions
TOR habitual drunkenness what have YOU TO
say in your defence 81
Nothing, please you honor, but habitual
thirst"
HABITS or THE PREsIDENT.-The President,
we are told, invariably addresses Messrs.
Seward and Chase as - Governor" Mr.. Blair
as "Judge," the Secretary of the Navy al
" Stanton" With others he is more familiar.
calling the Commander in Chief Henry
and the Governor of Pennsylvania " Andy.''
A certain auctioneer's brougham hap
penlog to prevent anobleman's carriage from
drawing up after the play, the nobIeman de.
sired the coachInan to drive Off at the same
time calling to the owner 4" NJ. Auctioneer.
your brougham is a-going, a-going, it's gone ~
to the great modification of the auctioneer
and the mirth of every one present.
- Be not slow in the breaking of a sinful
custom; quick, courageous resolution is
better than a gradual deliberation. In such
a combat, he is the bravest soldier that laws
about him without fear or with. Wit pleads.
fear dishartens. He that would kill HYDRA.
had better strike off one neck than five heads.
fell the tree, and the branches are soon cut
Sir Thomas Fitzgerald, who was famous
for hogging, had raised regiment of peas
antry, which he called the Ancient Irish. He
and they were sent foreign service On
his return, he boosted frequently of their
bravery, and that no other troops were so
forward to face the enemy. Ono wonder, -
said Ned Lysaght, * thanks to your foggingz
they were ashamed to show their backs"
CREAM CURE FOR CoSsCMPrIov.-Th.
Hedacat Reporter says that a consunptive pa
I