Delaware State journal and statesman., 1863-06-16
Good Manners.

The world is full Of mnnnfrs, of etiquette,
courtesy, and apparent cordially, but there is
Little that can be properly called good manners
Coed manners may be illustrated ne.
eatvely, by showing what are specimens of bad
mnuners. These wound those heal BAD Imam
ners offend; COED manners please. The one
tends to vice anl depreciation the other to virtue
and happiness
Good manners accommodates one to the circum-
stances, aud the inferiority even, Vi others. It
comes down with grace it can stoop without
seeming TO do so. 1t can come into another
PERSONS world easily aud naturally, and without
going out of ones own world Bad manners
never does this, except for evil purposes. 1t
essays to communicate with others without ac-
commodating itself to them, or going at all into
their world, or respecting their sympathies aud
tastes. 1t repels aud cmharrnsses, md nuts
others at Il distance. lie who has
good manners will uncolsciously make sacrifices
for another he will be upon his guard to save
the feelings of others. The late king of England
Whatever may be said of bis morals, was a m odel
Of good manners. He was pronounced the first
gentleman of the kiogdom. AT IL royal dinner
pntiy one Of the guests, from thoughtlessness or
or otherwise, set his cup upon the table cloth.
rather than in the saucer. The guests. in very
bad manners took notice Of it,, aud looked ut
each other, and at the king ms if To express
their disapprobatiOn. That moment the king
Jet his cup down upon the cloth also aud thus,
ny an act OF royal good manners, put the discon-
rerIed guest nj ease, and into good company
Good manners do not consist in ease. so much ~
~ the art of putting others at ease They tend
To give one II home feeling, and refreshing
seuse Of freedom IN your presence. They put
You above the suspicion OF being watched, or the
Tear Of Offending. They do nor consist in atti-
tudes, etiquette aud graceful forums Good
manners ARE the absence of manners in the hest
sense of the word. They allow to another his
own manners. They allow they invite freedom
OF thought anl behavior. Manipulated manners
are usually bad manners, especially when artif-
cla and capricOus, aud they render one singu
lar, because difficult TO initiate and reciprocste.
ARTIFICIAL bowling, measured mechanical move
ments, the artificial touching of the Int ar the
torhead, rubbing the hands, feigued laugh,
fashioned politeness, superlatiye epitbets in
ereetng or parting much morc giving one the
up OF the fingers, ore finger, or the lett hand in
salutaton. All these are bad manners
GOOD manner is disnteresled it is self.for
getting. II enters with interest into nnother's
success II does not arrogate attention to ones
own affairs, and monopolize the interest Of the
company in ones own matters. 1t is exceeding
" bad manners to take il for granted that the
company will be most Interested by n recital of
ones own adventures and successes; md To feel
no interest 10 the affairs aud successes of another
How often persons suppose themselves the centre
OF oil interest," and collapse when the conversa-
ton turns upon what another is or has done.
that is prais worthy, but kindle and glow
when the conversation returns on themselves. or
their family, or affairs
Good manner is not always watching for i'm
prophecies; it is not easily betrayed into the
insult Of admOnishing others Of supposed IN
manners When You are in the presence of one
whose bearing or manner constrsins YOU. and
crlpples you, and binders free utterance, and
makes you feel awkward and uneasy, and seems
to say, l am the standard, am the model or
beau ideal of manners, you are in the nresence
person who las yet learn the first principles Of
good manners. Good manners are always co u.
pied with mOdesty; there is spontaneity in
them they give freedom to another; thew are
good feeling naturally expressed. The reason