The mountain Democrat., 1863-10-10
AGAINRT ROYa.

1ue BOY 10 0rea01uI animal, under
whatever aspects we regard him, and in
whatever social rank, from the aristocratic
youth at his private tutors down TO the
gamin at the corners of the streets. Poll.
ticians may talk of the dangerous class.
es,' but there is no class existing so Cd.
posed to order as the Boys; so terrible 10
the sged, so Indifferent to the fair sex, so
pitiless to themselves. No nation, how.
ever civilized, can hoce to forget what
were its own primeval wicked habits, so
long as it possesses Boys. In them we see
continually reproduced picture Of savage
humanity. The same love of cruelty for
its own sake, the same taste for petty
theft, the same indifference to knowledge,
are as observable in fashionable public
school as in q tribe ofpainted Ojibbeways.
The latter, however, possesses hospitality,
whereas a company Of well born British
youths are accustomed to welcome new
conner with falsehood, and torture, and
scurrilous jests about his family, from
whom he has just parted with tears.
1t is the paradoxical fashion of these
days to praise the bays. This partly ari-
ses from fear (for they are getting worse
than ever), and partly from the author Of
Tom Brown, who has become devils ad.
vocate' to them, just as Mr.. Froude has
done to Henry VIII, and a previous his
torian to Richard III.
Any idea OF appeasing the boy element
is, however, quite ridiculous; the animal
is implacable, and, like horse that per.
ceives his master is afraid of him, becomes
unmanagable if petted. As for authors,
they may write what they like Of an ex-
tinct genius, and we must take it for
granted; but when they compose eulogist-
ic works upon Boys, even the humblest
reader (having been q boy himself once)
must be permitted to have his own opin-
ion upon the subject.
Boys have no wit and no humor. If
they do find one Of their number possess.
ed of either, they call him 'iacetious, and
lick him. They hate poetry and if they
discover bard among them, they treat
him like witch. They have a grim de.
light in practical joking, the principal
point Of which is to intlict pain. They
are affirmed by their admirers to be cour-
ageous and highSpiritcd, but have gen.
orally observed that they prefer to engage
in single combat with individuals under
their own size. They do not bully boys
Of the form above them. tits the uShers
for the most part poor and friendless
persons-who are the objects Of their mis-
chieTous tricks, and not the head master.
Ire robust boy is a hero among them,
but they oppress the delicate and the
weakling, exactly as some evil kinds Of
bird illtreat their sick and wounded. If
all the grown up in the world should sud
denly fail, what frightful thing would
society become reconstructed by Boys!-
If Adam had begun life as lad, the world
would have been deal worse than it is,
We may depend upon it. He would not
have required an Eve to tempt him to
steal apples, and what life he would have
led all those harmonious animals! Plaza.
ble as they might have been, he would
have done his best to set the bull terrier
at the garden cat, or he would not have
been a boy, you may take my word for it.
Some boys are doubtless worse than 9TH
ors; but there is, in my opinion, no such
thing as a good boy, except in the story
books. II the least Approximately. Gsuch
a phenomenon appears in school, all his
companions twit him with the unnatural
ness Of his pretensions. He q boy-no,
he must be a gal!-ah, Muff, Milksop,
Funk, Molly coddle =
However bad boys may be If brought
up alone. they are infinitely worse when
in masses. What the Tom Brownies call
the tone Of a school, is always below the
public opinion Of grown men. no matter
Of what class, age or country. The in
stances Of cruelty which arouse general
horror in the newspapers, occur among
boys as matter Of course nor do re-
member Of but single instance Of whole
boy community rising in armed revolution
and pitching into the oppressor. use
that boys phrase designedly, although,
like all boys phrases it is a vulgar one.
The author of the Ingoldsby Legends, with
a license foI which not even his agreeable
muse can be pardoned, has composed an
amusing poem upon Vulgar Boy, as if
boy could possibly not be vulgar.
He puts bis thumb unto his nose and spreads
his fingers out
is an action as natural to the boy world as
sucking tatfy. oh, yes' 'Ahl' Would
your Spell able!' 'Jerryuselam! = ETC.,
are sarcastic observations as familiar in
the mouths Of high-born EtoniaDs in their
playing fields, as of the youths with half
pair of braces and one shoe in White
chapel fame; nor is the tone one whit less
defiant and impudent in one case than in
the other. .
The low bred boy can whistle perhaps
with a more aggravating shrillness. since
he has perfected himself in that art at Pc
RODS when his aristocratic contemporary
has been compelled to study classic auth
oas, bat otherwise there is not q pin to
choose between them l disbelieve in all
ameiiorating influences, while boys are al
lowed to mix together, and egg one anoth-
er on to miSchievous atrocities. II, in
deed a whole generation of boys could be
brought up in solitary confnement-well
securcd-a reformation might be effected,
but the operation would be difficult, and
there seems to be no philanthropic enter
prise in that direction. If it be asked in
triumph:
How is it, if boys are as bad as you rep
resent, that they become, as men, respect
able members of society? Iconfess can
make no reply. Perhaps their savage ma
turc is modified when they begin to ap-
preciate the softening influences of the fair
sex. Perhaps they are suddenly impress
ed on their emergence from Barbarism by
being brought face to face with Civiliza-
tion.
Certain it is that the worst characters
tics disappear or find some other channel
in the world Of men-such as law-for
their tranquil exercise. At the Universi.
ties, the immediate transition from the