Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-12-11

exquisite to find himself in. How was
he to get home? To make his entrance
in pair Of enormous pantaloons, and a
frieze coat which reached bis heels was
TOO much for him, and TO put on the wet
garments would not be possible. In such
trying emergencies, women always con-
trive some way of escape. The good
natured Mrs. N at last compromised
the matter, by persuading the helpless
youth to stop all night. Paul was but
too happy to consent, and as it was i'm
possible to draw any conversation out Of
him, he was shown up stairs to bed
which bad hastily been fitted up in the
farlhest corner. He was informed that
his wet clothing would be dried, and pla-
ced at the head of the stairs in the morn
ing.
Hastily throwing himself upon the
bed, our hero gave himself up to such
thoughts as he could at the moment col
ect but his ideas had been so suddenly
scattered by his fall into the detested Gel
lar, that the result of whatever reasoning
process he went through would be Of very
little interest to the reader. Sleep, which
so often comes TO our relief in times of
distress, at last visited him, but his slum-
ber was not OF the balmy kind Diss
torted and dismal were his dreams. AT
one moment he was swimming in the vast
Stygian lake of black hair dye (Pau's
hair by nature was of lively brick coll
or)--and again he would fancy himself
tumbling backward down some chasm
black as Erebus, in which nothing was to
be seen but innumerable Mary Ms
convulscd with hideous laughter. Had
it entered into the sleeper's head to dream
of Pandemouium, the presiding spirits
would have been pretty girls with hazel
eyes.
But time waits not even upon soiourn-
ers in dream land Morn, with rosy flo
gers,
.Unbarred the gates of Light
and when friend Paul opened his eyes it
was broad day light. Before he comes
down stairs let US see what is going on
in the kitchen. Mary had risen with The
first meadow lark, and was busily engag-
ed in assisting her mother to prepare
breakfast, while her father attended to
some cut door employment. Mrs N
had just placed pan upon the stove,
and tie savory odor which speedily arose
told unmistakably OF bam and eggs
While the latter are irizzIing and sput-
tering away. let US 60 up stairs again.
Paul rubbed his eyes probably to dis
cover whether be was in the flesh, having
satisfied himself on that point, be peered |
around to see if there was any toilet ar
ticles in the room. There was close at
hand Tiny table with a snow white COW
er, upon which we're all that an exquisite
could wish, while above hung mirror.
So far all was well. Now for the clothes |
Sure enough, there they were on chair
at the top OF the stairs. A vigorous ef-
fort and Richard (or rather Paul) would |
be himself again Paul crept out OF
bed and ran towards his clothes. About
half way was piece of paper. He
stepped upon it, when, horrible TO relate.
with a crash it gave way under him, and |
in the twinkling of an eye he descended
bodily into the Kitchen below, falling
plump into the great pan on the stove
One moment Mary stood aehast at the
hdeous apparition, and then ran scream
ing from the room.
The old lady screamed Fire = and
: Murder but she instinctively saw the
necessity of rescuing the poor fellow
from his painful position.
Having large fork in her hand, with
which she had been an instant before /
turning she meat, and which was conse-
quentIy quite hot, she applied it,in her
absence of mind, to bis ribs, as if he had
been an Indian captive at the stake.
Yelling in pain, Paul sprang to the
floor just as Mr.. N (who had heard
The screams and supposed the young man
was numbering his household) entered
armed with a bludgeon. Surprised be-
yond measure to see the young gentleman
of the night before in such scanty habil-
iment, he was about to apply the stick to
his shoulders. Mrs. N, however,
interfered and explained the accident.
up stairs, then, sir 7 shouted the
stern old farmer. Put on your breeks
and leave my house r
Paul darted up stairs, donned his cloth
ing without even looking at the glass,
and limped out of the front door, all of
The family having absented themselves to
leave tho way clear.
And that, gentle reader, was how
Paul fell through his courtship. 1t is
useless to state that he ever afterward
kept respectable distance from singing
schools and pretty girls with hazel eyes
Are you ready to say it is all fiction
Look around you--there are Ringle-
woods on small scale to be seen every
lay.