Litchfield enquirer., 1863-11-05

Coleridge, the poet and philosopher once arriving at az inn, called out
 Waiter, do you dine here individually Or collectively ?'
 "sir,r replied the knight of the napkin, we dimes at six"
 Woman must remember that she brought more sin and misery into the world by her eat ing than ever man has by his drinking.
 We should round every day of stirring action with an evening of thought. We learn nothing of our experience except we muse upon it.
 There is Q man out West so forgetful of fa- ces, that his wife is compelled to keep 8 wafer stuck on the end of her nose, that he may dis tinguish her from other ladies hut this does not prevent hiun from making occasional mis- takes.
 Dean Swift, in travelling once called at g hGuse. The lady of the mansion, rejoicing to have SO great guest, with more eagerness and Aippancy asked him what he would have for dinner.
 Will you have an apple pie, or gooseber- ry pie, sr, or cherry pie, or plum pie, or pig eon pie, sir
 Any pie but a magpie.' replied Dean, in his usual saycastic manner.
 
 Animals gut up queer agtics down East. A runaway horse trotted into Q store in Bath where several ladies were trading, making things generally miscellaneous and at Portland q respectable woman was aroused from her slumbers. . fey mornings since, by the at- tempted forcible entrance to her sleeping apartment of COW. The playful bovine had passed through the kitchen and sitting room, and was still endeayoring to advance, but was repuIsed, and soon changed her base,
 Temporal losses are only gentle brcezes i; but eternal losses are insupportable storms.
 Men are so inclined to content themselves with what is commonest; the spirit and the senses so easily grow dead to the impressions of the beautiful and perfect, that every one should study, by all methods. to Dourish in his mind the faculty of feeling these things. For DO man can bear to be entirely deprived of such enjoymsnts; it is only because they are not used tO taste of what is excellent, that the generality of people take delight in silly and insipid things, provided they be new. For this reason one ought, every day at least. to hear little song, read good poem see q fine picture, and.it it were possible. to speak ' few reasonable words. Goeths.
 Concerning Boston negro who undertook to melt the lead of g ten pound Parrott shell to make siukers for bis fish lines, 2 South Car olina African remarks:
 "GolIy! white folks needn't say muffin now bout de stupidness of Souf Car'lina darkies and de'telligence of de Boston niggers; dis yere darkey doesn't know Souf Ca.'lina boy dat's half such fool as to stick loaded shell into de mouf of stove = dats fact, shure. De --- old fool come clar down yers to stick shell in de stove-yaw yawl'
 A PUZZLED JusrcE.-A man named Josh was brought before country squire for steal ing bog, and three witnesses being examined swore they saw him steal it. A wag having volunteered as counsel for Josh, knowing the scope of the justice brain, arose and addressed the learned justice as follows :- . "May it please your honor, can establish this mans honesty beyond the shadow of q doubt. for have twelve witnesses ready to swear they DID NOT see him steal 1t" The '.Guire rested his head for few mo- ments upon his hand, as fin deep thought. and with great dignity arose, and brushing | back his hair said r6. .s, |" If there are twelve who did not sea him steal it. and only three who did, I discharge the prisoner"
 A hardshell preacher. in discoEsins about Daniel in the lions den, said And there he sot all Eight long, looking at the show for nothing, and it did not cost him thing" When two friends part, they should lock M each others secrets, and exchange the keys.-- The truly noble mind has no resentmepts: When we are alone, we have our thought to watch in our families, our tempefs ans Ia 14a|if1 07f 1001