North Branch democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Pa.) 1854-1867, 1863-01-21
LETTER FTOM MAJOR JACK DOWN.
ING.
WASHINGTON, Dec. 10, 1862

WASHINGToN, Dec. 10, 1862.
SURs Wal, I'm glad to say that Con-
grls' has got together, and The Messge has
been red and dige.red. The Kernel worked
hard enuf on it, tell you. He wouldn't lei
Seward or Chase have enything to do with Il
but he J"st mauled IT all out himself. The
next day arter the Message was sent in, Sum-
nure cum in an sed the Message warn't exact
ly grainatIka III all its parts. telled him
| that l guessed ef h- had to work around
snort c"rners as The Kernel did, without get
ting trlpped up he would find it nifty hard
work to get everythin jest accurdir TO gram
mar, telled HIN "grammar warn't Of eny
ack"unt vile the rebeIiy un lasted-that, like
the C"ns'ltushin, the grammar was suspend
ed, or locked up where habus korpu> couldn't
get al it, In fact, ses "Mr Su,nnure. |
think eny man who talks about its bein nee
essary to obsarve the laws of grammar,
eny other laws, Wen the nashn IS in deIh
struggle with traiturs, is di.Ioyal person, an
orter to be sent to Fort La Fieit."
Wen sed this, Sunuure turned all sorts
Of c"lors, an ses he, oval, Majer, perhaps
You re rite about grammar; but think , ou
orter spell the Presidents name rite in your
letters. It's a disrespect to tue Cheef Ma Z.
e~trate not to do 1t"
'Wal, ses |, MIR. Sumnnre, Tve got my
| own idees on spellin Spelin is good deel
like sparkin the gals it's gest as feller
takes noshin. My idce is, cf spell a word
SO as to git its sound, Pm rite, an | don'I
keer wat you say, it's the only rule of spelIn
that holds good in the long FUN. Now" ses
"ef Lin k-in-don't spell Linkin, wal
on arth does it spell 2"
That seemed to stump him.
"But," ses he. Meier there's some gin
eral rules that orter be observed-rules that
the schools all USE"
Wal" ses |, IS DON'T know much about
schools, an guess the Kernel don't neither
| went TO school six weeks, an the Kernel
ses he wen, six months. School !arn n is
nifty poor truck to put into felrr's he'd, un.
less he's got good deal of brains there
There's more edicated fools now in the world
than there are fools of any other kind, an
there's great menny of 'em, Lord kno VS.
make all the trubbil."
Wal, Majer, ses he, "you amt an enemy
to edicati"n, hope"
Wal, no, Mr.. Senator, ain't no enemy
to edication; only hate ed'cated fools"
WALL" ses |, Wen ! was boy, an went
to school the six weeks | speak of, there was
boy in my class who could beat me spellin
an readin, an in eenamnst everythin, but
could lick him jest as easy as could whistle
lie hadn't eny more spunk, or pluck, or cour-
age than sick chicken, an nifty little genu,
wine common sense. HIS father, howev. r,
sent him to college, an the fust thing heered
of him, the papers were callin him larned
man, an he amt done eny thin ever sence but
to blab at Abolishin neetins an make Abu-
llshin speeches. Now" ses !, "that's wat /
call an edicated fool jest like the larned
pig, he kin Go wat he larns to do or sees
done but as for real common sense to tell
wether thing is rite or wrong, he amt worth
eny more for it than bull dog is to ketch
rats.
Sumnure looked kinder streaked wen I
sed this. but didn't say word, an jest here
the Kernel, who had been dogn stairs to get
his boot jack, cum in. Ses he, A" Good NOR
min, Mr.. Sumnure. l'll bet you one of Chase's
greenbacks," ses he, "that you can't tell
why this boot jack is like an ofice-seeker."-
Sumnure sed he couldn't. "Wal," ses the
Kernel, because it sticks close TO the heels
of the President.
telied the Kernel how that Sumnure sed
that the Messige warn't grammatical. Wal,
ses he, believe everything goes rong sence
| became President. The country is upside
down; the nggers are more ,rubbll than
ever before; the whits men are cuttn one
another's throat, an it seems as if Belem was
let loose an now the grammar has been
violated, they ssy. Wal, wonder wat on