The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1863-01-02

| ". T. Herald, and as it is a good satire, we
give it place in our columns
ION 70 RICHMOND"
| From tie Riclnoad Eeomiaer, Dec 18.
The screaming farce of ''On to Richmond"
has had run unparalleled in the history of the
Yankee drama. Staring placards in New Yorl.
! proclaimed that Goodies had been performed
for upwards of one hundred consecutive nights,
and many other such elegant plays, adapted to
| Northern taste, have had like career: but
what are these compared with "On to Rich
nond," which ran for upwards Of siy hundred
: days and nights, and has been played by Yam
! kee comedians to an audience consisting Of the
whole civilized world Such success was new
or before recorded in the annals Of theatricals,
and will never be again. Seward and Lincoln,
the authors of this brilliant farce, might be as
tonished at the results Of their genius, and the
Northern people, who have en- 0aasse become the
actors in the play, cannot fail to be proud Of
their performance.
But what is most singular in the career Of
this surprising hstrionc achievement, is the fact
that ii was put ON the boards in violation Of tho
wishes Of the public and has been continued
/ through nearly two years in spite of the earnest
i remonstrances Of the audience, for the sole BEN
eft and amusement Of the authors themselves.
One would suppose that by this time there would
be diminution Of interest on the part of the
players. Generosity is n great virtue; but n
comedy that costs two millions of dollars day,
without producing one cent of receipt for so G.
normous an outlay, ought, in the course of two
revolutions Of the earth about the sun, to pro-
duce slight languor, and, perhaps, some posi-
tive fatigue in the leading actors and supernu-
meraries, if not in ''the management" That
an approximate conception Of the labors and
disappointments incident to the farce of Son to
Richmond" may be obtained we will trace the
adventures of one Of the wandering players en-
gagged in it.
His early years were passed among the pump
kins of Vermont his youth and dawning man
hood in the midst of the lasts and aYls Of LYanz
During the week he made shoes for Southern
negroes, and ON Sundays sat under the drop
pings of his sanctuary of Wendell Phillips. The
Tribune was his Bible, and his notion Of Para
disc YVES freedom, which he thought to realize
on earth by hberating the bodies of those the
making of whose soles gained him precarious
living. The drama Of Son to Richmond" was
announced. Fired with ambition and the de-
sire of reducing his social theories to practice
in ''Uncle TOMS Cabin" he cast his awl upon
the altar Of his country, and threaded his way
to the theatre of operations at Washington
Costumed in blue. he attended the rehearsals OF
the play, and blew off the heads of his COM
rades while learning the manual. The first rep
resentation of the farce was fixed for Manassas,
and thither he repaired with fifty thousand men
one fine Sunday in July. His piety did not re-
mind him in the morning that he was using the
Sabbath as play day. but as the sun declined
his conscience settled in his legs, and carried
him violently to Washington. "On to Rich
mond" during that terrible night was to him
not only screaming farce, but also q below
ing tragedy.
Still he stuck to his new calling. The fail
urc of the performance was attributed to the
fact that the leading actors, Scott and Mellow
ell, did not know their parts So our ambi
tious' cobbler, reinforced by 200,O others,
went to rehearsng again, assisted by a tremen-
dous paraphernalia of big guns, little guns, bal
looms, calcium lights, rocket brigades, poisoned
balls, and, above ALL cavalry, that disdaned
saddles and preferred sitting on the necks Of
their horses. A new leading actor, Mcclellan,
was introduced. Nothing was left undonc to
insure the success Of the second presentation of
Son to Richmond" But the winter rains spoil
ed the Manassas theatre, and the whole compa-
ny, after being stuck in the mud until starva-
! ton stared them in the face, hobbled back to
Washington as best they could. Disgraceful
failure number two.
Objection being made to mud, Mcclellan took
to WATER carrying cobbler over with him. They
arrived in front of Yorktown, where, in order
to avoid the mud, the company went to ditch
ing. Having outditcheda rival company, man.
aged by an obscure person of the name of John
ston, they rushed to Williamsburg, and tried to
play son to Richmond" but an obstreperous
fellow named Longstrcet, being intoxicated no
doubt, interfered with the performance and
broke it up. Again they tried it at Barbours-
/ vile; but some rowdcs in the vicinage fell up
on the company and drove them back to their
boats. Still undismayed, the company dug their
way to Seven Pines, when, to their utter aston
ishment, q parcel of rustics rushed out of the
woods and kicked them into the swamp. A
month of preparation ensued, all things were
quite ready; "On to Richmond" was to be
played this time without fail, no postponement
on account OF weather, when 10! furious man
called A. =. Hill, accompanied by the lunatic
jackson, with many other Southern barbarians
swarmcd out of their holes and caves, and i'm
pertinently elbowod them from Mendon Bridge
to Mechanicsville, thence to Cold Harbor,
thence to Savage's Station, thence to Malvern
Hill, thence to Harrisons Landing, and so spoil
cd the plan entirely, besides robbng them of o
great part of their theatrical wardrobe.
The cobbler from Linn was not left at Har-