Union County star and Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1859-1864, 1863-04-24
The Bachelor and the Baby.

Inc Bachelor and the Baby.
"What shall do" and the old bach.
elor stamped about the sittiug-roon in q
perfcc, rage Of doubt, looking first at the
pspping baby in the little willow cradle,
and then at the busy French clock Oh the
mautle-sbelf.
"As sure as my name is Joseph Phelps,
tha, little, two,ii,ted, large iunged nephew
Of miue is about waking, aud it wants one
whole hour Of the time which its mother
appointed for her return. Wbew.
uctuslly sweat thinking about it. What
can do with ity How can l treat it to
sugar what-do- you-call ems, or hold it, or
rot it, or do anything with ~
At this juueture, Il faint wall from the
baby receptsc'c brought bachelor Phelps
to his taps. VIII al crerZy and alacri'y
that would have l,cone a husband aud
baby-.eudar, he mmenced rocking the
cradle, sending the Indignant baby into
perfect trgGor of kicks aud squalls.
Backwards AID forwards, from one side Of
the pillow to the other, the round red
face rolled, the infant fists were clenched
with force that purpled them, while
from the white, plump throat, came cry
that set tie bachelor wild with fear.
Again Joe looked at the clock.
"What 10 the deuce can | do!'' be
exclaimed, viewing wOefully the little
ilh,m,d face befyrc him.
He sat down in big chair before the
baby, spread double cradle quilt over
hi. knees, and with look Of terror upon
his face, proceeded to take the baby from
its resting place. lie drew the young
Lopefdl into bis lap, just as a very neat
old lady would pick up pocket haDdker-
chief, with bis thumbs and fingers. \
fresh yell from the rosy mouth of the ba
by was the ouly expression Of thanks, Us
be commenced the Dever-out of fashion
baby-trOt.
sit must be that something is prickiDg
him. Shoe shoe !" said Joe, conmen-
eius search for tue aggrayating pin that
was driving the child into such a rage /
But DO pin vas to be found, and he made
on attemp; to .urr the baby ever, but Oh
the clumsiness Of bis iugers-the little
Ill Of Ian IN the !
fiJor, sending out cry that was louder,
clearer, deadlier, than before.
"Lord save me, I've broken its neck y
ard 10 the agony Of despair tried to quiet
him. A thought struck Joe. lie saw
basque lying against the wall Of the ad
5pinipg bedroom, aud, with a smile Of de-
light upon his countenance, be went for
it. Sure enough, there it was, stutfiag, !
bodice, aud all a real monument OF
female ingenuity. He was Wild with joy. ,
He pinned it over his coat, and fastened e,
the sleeves behind him. He took baby /
and laid It's head against the false breast
work.
"Shades Of southern plantations and
cotton factories :" exclaimed Joe, and
baby rooted its nose into it about mile, ?
then cudiled for a snOczs. Theu the
bachelor commenced singing:
"Womcn are al a aeetin- shos,
For mans deiusion given:
When filled Ilth bran hui stuffed with tow,
They Too quite
A tap upon the door stopped Joe IN the I
midst Of his suggestive song, and before
be had time to disarrsy himself, tue door
was opened, and a laughing pair OF eyes
peered in upon him.
"Your sister is not at home, is she 2"
rhirropped the visitor.
"No ma am" s,ammered joe, growing
vuy red 10 the face "and have turned
nurse"
Miss Hays laughed, offered to relieve
him of his charge, which he willingly con-
ten,ed to, sitting ns.r by, The while, in-
tently watching :.e-. She managed baby
to charm, without the e4slu and Joe
was captivatei.
Joseph Phalps married Fanny Hays