North Branch democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Pa.) 1854-1867, 1863-03-04
af(lsteuaneous.
HOW THEY GO To BED.

| HOW THEY GO It'd BED.
The difference between a man and woman
in disposition finds no palmer illustration
than that afforded at the moment when Ell
ther of them retires to bed.
The young girl trips gaily up to her cham
ber and with the cautious timidity peculiar
to her sex, first locks the doors and arranges
the window curtains so that by no possible
chance pasaer-by or belated nocturnal wan
derer from the pavement can catch glimpse
of her budding beauty when en- d,shdbelLe.-
This task completed she turns on the gas to
its full, and institutes e general search thro'-
out the apartment, that she may be sure it
does not contain horrible burglar or ga
desperate ruffian" in big whiskets and crispy
black hair. Carefully with delicate little
fingers, she lifts the bed valance, peers into
| places where even Tom Thum couldn't squeeze
his diminutive corporation and takes a curso-
ry peep into the half-emptied trunk not for
| getting to glance nervously under the sofa,
the space between which and the floor is not
sufficient to contain the ghost of Culvin Ed
son, much less an ordinary robber.
| Having aScertained that she is really alone
she lesurely proceeds to divest her fair form
of" the silk and linen conventionalitics Of So
ciety." First, she relieves her giorsy hair
from its thraldom of pins and combs and
does it up" more compactly. Then off
comes the little embroidered collar, and the
| light vapory cloud cf lace she calls her un-
der-sleeves which all the day have been clasp
ed around her white plump arms by couple
of India rubber straps. Next, the 50 love of
spring silk" dress is unfastened in front, par
TALLY revealing-never mind that just now
Then sundry waist strings and buitoned straps
are unloocened, and 10 what collapse. A
collapse like that of loves big balloon
She stands like Saturn in the centre of rings
There they lie upon the soft carpet, partially
covered by the linen underfixens and over
| fXens wi tn no more expression in them than
| there is in the bare floor beneath the carpet
Sits she now upon the edge of the snowy bed
and begins the unloosiEg Of CATERS and the
dsrubing of the fair swelling limbs. Of the
stockings. The pretty little foot is carefully
perched upon the knee-down drops the ga-
ter-and the thumb inserted at the top Of
the stocking pushes it downtown over the
heel, and-the cotton rests beside the pru-
nela. So with the other foot only involving
Il slight change of po sltion.
There is happy smile that peeps out from
behind the bushes of her sweet face now as
standing before the glass she places upon her
head the night-cap and with quick twist OF
her fingers ties the bewitching bow. Then
the nght-gown is thrown on over the friIled
chemise, concealing the heavy bosom and the
fair shoulders in the linen folds. Don't you
envy that night-robe and the Liberties it
takes? Don't you envy it, you wretched
miserable old bachelor-yon snarlng growl-
ing old curmudgeon?
Then the counterpan and sheets are
thrown back, the gas is turned down very
low, and the little form presses the yielding
couch, and the angel goes off into the world
of deeams in which the handsome moustache
of her Adolphus and his VOWS of eternal love
are prominent--the remainder of the picture
being filled with ministers, bridesmaids. new
dresses, drives in Central Park, and plenty
of /" gold galore or love in cottage"
Now in the room directly above her is the
great brute of brother. He comes into il
shuts the door with slam, turns the key
with snap, growis at chair which happen:
, to be in his way, pulls off his boots and
throws them into the corner jerks off hi:
socks from his feet, drops his pantaloons or
J the floor and let's them lie there-gets off bis
coat and vest by quick vindictlve sort o
twist of his arms and body, unpins and un
buttons his collar throws it carelessly, will
the tie at, rather than on the table-travel
, TO the window in his shirt extremity-to le
down the curtain, as if he didn't care a curse
whether the entire population of the stree
beheld his anatomy or not-then puts ou
the light and bounces into bed like a grea
calf jumping into pile OF hay-curls himsel
up his knees nearly touching his nose-lie
so moment or two-turns on his back
streaches his limbs out-swears at the tuck
q ing of the bed clothes grunts-gets over ol
I the other side-and is asleep. Then come
T in the snoring and snorting.
Isn't there a difference in style
e We learn from the Boston papers
that the "hmericaus of African descent" i
that vicinity are not satisfied with the propc