The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1863-01-30
CANNOT ESCAPE HISTORY.

| a. HosSA eAi'a AeoS Az
ever Caucasian.
CANNOT ESCAPE HISTORY.
| The Carbon Democrat, in discussing tn
Presidents assertion that he and his admins
tration cannot escape history, makes the follow
ing severe reply:
| No! ''you cannot escape history but yol
viii bcrememberd as long as mankind shall
Isurvite, You will be remembered as the mer
who ruined your country, destroyed 'stIe last
best hope of earth," in base attempt to make
the negro the equal of the white man. You
will surely be ''ligthed down to the lttest gen.
| eration," by the memory Of the burning cities
/ and towns Of America, whose fires were kinded
by the torch which you supplied You will be
''lighted down" to your last home, by the flames
of civil war which was the offspring of your
ambition, and which was needlessly prolonged
5yyour fanaticism, and your greed of public
spoil. You ''cannot escape ehistory," but future
| ages will point to you in the same spirit that
they now point to the Jacobins Of. France, or
the tyrants of the House of Eapsburg.
The Bastiles of America will cry out against
YOU. The blood of quarter of million q
deceived but honest patriots willdye your ha1
so ted that eternity will not cleanse them Il
mutilated remains of tho great charter
liberty, like the ghost Of murdered Banquo,
haunt you at every turn, and shake its
locks in your very faces. Liberty, witt
garments trailne IN blood and dust, will
her beseecbing ace TO heaven and pray "a
geance upon her despoilers. A hampere.
ridden and oppressed posterity will cry
gainst you, and inseribe upon the page of
ry that records your acts ''dishonor."
ORpHEUs C. KERRoN ARMY SURGERY
Tor z. T:-There is a certain something{
vously of my latter end.and recognize
clans as the true heroes of the battlefield;
shbdued swearing of the sufferer on
the mufied tread of the venerable nurse,
comes into the room to make sure the
recommended by the doctor il not too m
the patient, the sepulchral tone of the regi
tai cat rs she recognizes the tread of
Mortimer, the sergeant's bull terrier, outs
all these are things TO make the spectator
member that we are but dust, and that to ret
to dust is our destiny f--....t ,ss,,.
Early in the week. my boy, a member Of
Pennsylvania mud larks was made sick in
strange manner. A draft Of picked men froni
certain regiments were ordered for q perilous
expedition down the river. You mayb aware, |
my boy, that.a draft is always dangerous to
delicate constitutions, and as the mud-lark
happened to burst into q profuse perspiration
about the time he found himself standing in
this draft, he, of course, took such violent cold
that he had to be put to bed directly. l went
to sec him, my boy, and whilst he was relating
tome some of the affecting anecdotes of the time
when he used to keep bar, member of the
Medical staff Of the United States of America
came in to see the patient. va
This venerable surgeon first deposited a large
saw, a hatchet and two pickaxes on the table,
and then said he:
GLOW do you find Yourself boy?'
The lark took small chew of tobacco with
a melancholy air, and says he:
Il think I've got the guitar in my head, Mr..
Sawbones, and l am about TO join the angel
choir"
81 see how il is" said the surgeon, thought
fully ''you think you've got the guitar, when
it is only the drum of your ear that is affected.
Well, said the surgeon, with sudden pleasant
ness, as he reached after the saw and one OF the
pickaxes, Il must amputate your leg at once"
The mud-lark curled himself up in bed like
a wounded anaconda, and says he:
81 don't see it in that light"
''Well," said the surgeon in a sprightly man
ner, ''then suppose put fly blister on your
stomach, and only amputate your right arm J"
The surgeon was formerly a blacksmith, my
boy, and got his diploma by inventing some pills
with iron in them. He proved that the blood
six healthy men contained enough iron to
make six horse shoes, and invented the pills to
cure hoarseness.
The sicl, man reflected on what his medical
adviser had said, and then says he:
''Your words convince me that my situation
must be dangerous. must see some relative
before permit myself to be dissected."
"Who do you wish to send me for p says the
surgeon
'.NIy grandmother my dear old grandmother"
said the mud-lark, with much feeling
The surgeon took me cautiously aside, and
says he:
'sMy poor patient has cold in his head, and
his life depends, perhaps, on the qualification OF
his wishes. You have heard him ask for his
says the surgeon softly, 0and
MS grandmother" lives too far away to be sent
FOR, wemust practice little harmless deception.
We must send for Secretary Welles of the Ma
w Department, andintroduce him as the grand
mother. My patient will never know the diff
ference" P
j took the hint, my boy, and went after the 4,
Secretary, but the latter was so busy examin-a
ing model Of Noah's ark, that he could not be
cen. Happily, however, theIpatient recovered
while the surgeon was getting his saw filed, and
vas well cnongh last night to roconnolter IN