Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1863-09-11

read the latest intelligence from the seat of
war, from two to three hours sooner than
they otherwise would.
The Dubuque and Sioux City is great
road for time. You can ride longer on it,
than any other road in the country for the
same amount Of fare.
A Couple Of " Goaks. We heard good
thing on DR.. - the other day, and we
can't refrain from telling it. DR.. hired bug
gy at OwEN's to go a few miles in the coun
try. Reaching his destination, farmers, he
soon completed his business and was about
starting on his return, when his attention
was attracted by the appearance of fine
chicken dog. Being in want of such an ami
NAL he enquired Of the farmer if the dog was
for sale. The farmer thought he would sell
him, and the bargain was soon concluded by
the DR.. paying the farmer two dollars and a
half Jumping into his buggy and whis-
Ting cheerfully to his new made purchase,
who came bounding eagerly along, the DR..
ratified away homeward. Arriving at the sta
ble DR.. had to tell JOHN how he had bought
a dog, display him, get JouS's opinion of
his good points, etc, and, finally, as he was
about leaving, kindly offer the services of the
animal to JOHN any time JOHN felt disposed
to go cunning. John thanked him, and Or
dered the dog into the stable, which order
the dog very readily obeyed, notwithstand-
ing the Dr's coaxing and whisting to the
contrary. JOHN had to explain to the DR..
then that the dog belonged to him, and was
quite in the habit Of following off buggies
from the stable.
Now the Coax " to make up the couple
Is on one of our most distinguished members
of the legal fraternity. He didn't want dog,
but he wanted hog. A number of swine
arrested for running the streets, were adyer-
tised for sale. Our hero was at the sale and
made desirable purchase for three dollars.
On carrying his property home he discover
ed, much to his dismay, that he had purchas-
ed his own hog, which had escaped unbe-
known from his possession.
Copperhead Valor.-One day last week, as
we entered our office on returning from din.
ner, we were accostcd by a young man who
staggered up to US and enquired if we were
the ed shur" On receiving an answer in
the affirmative, he introduced himself as
+" Palmy, OF zee Jayvile MONSIEUR" ct &C
Cured to us at the time that Balmy would
have been moro appropriate name for the
inebriated youih.) He then proceeded to tell.
In drunken way, interspersed with about
three " hics to each word, that his paper
was copperhead sheet, and that it had
greater circulation and welded wider infiu-
ence than any other paper in Wisconsin. In
a very pompous manner our maudin visitor
also told how some three or four times the
administration had ordered the " MONSIEUR -
suppressed, but that he, Palmy," armed
with his trusty revolver, had met the bas
minions of Old Abe on the Threshold. and
defied them, and sent them back covering
their mission unperformed, and that owing
to his undaunted frmness the " MONSIEUR"
still lived. All this, and much more. the
drunken pup told US, and finally becoming
weary Of his senseless twaddle, and wishing
to go to work. we told him that we had got
enough of him, and that he wopl1xabliee US
by skedaddling" We turned BIT him.
and had got part way across the when
we heard our visitor exclaim in q ei-com-
ic tone Of voice, " Go and prepare six
graves order six collins, for am the best
pistol shot in the West" We went back and
saw he had revolver in his hand Weask
ed him what he intended to do with it, when
instead of answering our question, he imme.
diately simmered down to quiet tone. and
protested that he was good Union man.
We told him that if tina. was the case. we
had no trouble with him. He replied" am
a good Union man, and here's my hand on
it" extending his hand which we took. AZ
ter moment or two he left, and that was the
last we saw of him: We had not attached
Importance enough to the matter to consider
It worthy of publication until our attention
was called to an article in the Herald, which
purported to be an account of the affair Jus
as it transpired,-the authority being "Mr.
Palmer, of the GAINESVILLE (lvis.) Monitor. y
We had supposed that when the fellow got
sober he would apologize for his conduct, but
instead. he left town in a hu,rvs Ai..,l