The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1863-07-25

TAKING UP A Coll ECTroN. Rarely hay,
we heard II better story, or better told sto
ry, than this, from reverend gentleman
in Missouri:
from secular point of view, is hardly as
smooth and free from difficulty as a posi-
ton in more cultivated and populous com.
munities usually appear to be. The people
are thinly scattered here and there, en-.
gagged in different pursuits, though chiefly
agricultural. Being collected from ali
parts of the older States, and gathered from
every class of society, they meet upon the
same common ground, upon terms of easy
familiarity, and restrained by no irksome
| conventionalities. People in a new coun-
| try generally have pretty hard time of it.
| They live sort of trough and tumble
life, wearing out their very best efforts in
struggle for existence. Under these cir
cumstanceS the material sometimes absorbs
completely the spiritual; and the people
not unfrequently ''get so far behlnd' with
the preacher they Nave to be powerfully
"stirred up" from the pulpit.
On one occasion we had visit from the
presiding elder of our district at one of our
quarterly meetings. We had not paid our
preacher ''ary dime" as the boys say, and
we expected a scoring from the elder.
Well, we were not disappointed. He
preached us moving discourse from the
text 'owE NO MAN ANYTHING" At the
close of the sermon he came at once to the
subject in hand,
Brethren" said he, "have you paid
Brother -- anything this year? Moth
ing at all, understand. Well, now, your
preacher can't live on air, and you must
pay up-pay up, that's the idea. He needs
twenty-five dollrrs now, and must have it!
Steward, We'll take up a collection now"
Here some of the audience near the door
began to slide out.
"Don't run! don't runv exclaimed the
elder. Steward, lock that door, and fetch
me the key" he continued, coming down
out of the pulpit, and taking his seat by
the stand table in front.
The Steward locked the door, and then
deposited the key on the table by the side
of the elder.
"Now, Steward" said he, ego round
with the hat. I must have twenty-five dol
lars out of this crowd before one of you
shall leave this house."
Here was elk" The congregation
were taken all aback. The old folks looked
astonished; the young folks Uttered. The
steward gravely proceeded in the discharge
of his official duties.
The hat was passed around, and at length
depositedson the elders table. The elder
poured "the funds on the table, and
counted the amount.
''Three dollars and a half! A slow start,
brethren! Go round again, steward. We
must pull up heap stronger than thatv'
Around went the steward again, and
finally pulled up at the elders stand.
''Nine dollars and three quarters. Not
enough yet. Go round again, steward
Around went the steward, with the hat,
the third time. =
"Twelve dollars and half! Mighty
slow, brethren! 'Fraid your dinners will
all get cold before you get home to eat
them! Go round again, stewardv'
By this time the audience began to be
tidgety. They evidently thought the joke
was getting to be serious. But the elder
was relentless. Again and again circulated
the indefattgable hat, and slowly but sure
ly, the "pile' on the table swelled towards
the requisite amount.
''Twenty-four dollars and half! Only
lack half a dollar. Go round again, stew
ard!'
Just then there was tap on the window
from the outside; hand was thrust in
holding half dollar between the thumb
and finger, and young Teller outside ex-
claimed:
"Here, Parson, here's your money. Let
my gal out O. there! I'm tired of waiting
for herr"
1t was ''the last hair that broke the ca
mel's back" and the preacher could ex-
claim, in the language of Ike Turtle, This
ere meetin's bust up