Evansville daily journal. (Evansville, Ind.) 1863-1866, 1863-11-02
The Draft---SurgicaI Examination Of
q COnScript.
From the Bunker Hin Mass. } AurOral

from the Bunker Hill (Mass.) Aurorel
The other day Chief Engineer Dean,
of the Fire Department, called at the |
Office where. I make shoes for a living,
and handed me big white Envelope, no
tifying me that j was drafted, and must
report myself for examination at Law
renee, on the 18th day of August
Now / consider it the duty of every
citizen to give his life, if need be, for the
defense of his country; so on the morn
ing of the eventful 18th, put on clean
shirt and my Sunday clothes, to go to
. Lawrence, to see if L could get exempted
Lawrence is situated on the Merrimac
{ river, and its principal productions are
mud, dust, and factory girls. The city
proper, or at. least that part that saw,
consisted of long, narrow entry, up one
fight of stairs, adorned overhead with
frescoing of gas-meters, and carpeted
with worn out tobacco guilds, and furn-
& ished with one chair, two settees, and as
many huge, square packing cases, mark
& ed 20 N, d." Scattered around this
pallatial entrance hall were some forty
or fifty conseripts, looking very much as
ifthey expected to be exempted by reas-
on of old age, before the young man with
the ferocious moustache should notify
them of their turn. Most of them, how
ever, were doomed to disappointment,
for while they counted the hours of de-
lay, the doer would suddenly open and
the tall young man would single out a
man and march him through the open
doorway to be seen no more
By and by-that is, after several hours
waiting-ny turn came
John Smith" shouted the door
keeper.
THAT me- says I, and, with cheer
from the crowd, entered large square
room where two persons sat writing at a
table, and third, evidently a surgeon,
was examining man in the last stages
{ -One OF the writers at the table, a
young man with curly eyes and blue
hair, nodded to me, and dipping his pen
Ia the ink, common eed-----.
John Smith, what's your name?"
John Smith" says L -..---
"Where were you born2 ~. -
Podunk, Maine.
What did your greatgrandmothe
die off" q,
"Darned if l know says L
E" Call it hapentap,p says he; and
You grandfather, too p
=" l don't care what you call it" saws
/, for was a little riled by his NONSENSE
cal question. os' -----.-..--.-
"D Did you ever have boils?r says he.
mot boil u r.
4" Or fits?,,'.i --.--e--- ---.---.
n Nary fit 1 ..z..t4e @
Or delirium tremens 2p
No, sir-eei,'
- "0r rickets?' ..,5leqs.5
g Ill rieket you,' says I, for / thought
he meant something else
TT Did you ever have the measels2 r"
says he. Here L took off my coat
d Orthe itch2 :" ....--..5l....
20 Yes, SIR said I-"That ere fist
(and I showed very large brown one
within three inches of his nose) has been
itching for the last ten minutes to knock
your pesky head off, you little mean,
loW-liyed, contemplate Whalp, YOU"
My dear sir, said the mild-spoken,
gentlemanly surgeon, laying his hand on
my arm, J" calm yourself, I pray. Don't
let your angry passions rise, bat take of
your clothes, so that can see what you
are made Of p
So l suppressed my anger, and with
drawing to corner, 1 hung my clothes
up on the floor, and presented myself fol-
examination, clad only with the covering
nature had given, except about a square
inch of eourt-plaster on my right shin
where had fallen over a chair the night
before, feeling for match.
g Young man, said the surgeci, look
ing me straight in the eve. "yol have
got the myopia
e Y es, sir said I, and good one
toO-a little Bininger, with drop O
Sto1she0Hi makes an excellent eYe-opeu
er of a morning.
"And there seems to be an amaurotiC
tendency of the right eye, accompanied
with ophthalmia"
:. Pshawr says l. .aft ss-e7
And that white spot in the left eve
betokens a cataract"
guess you mean in the ear" say,
/, "'cause Invent in swimming this morn
ing, and got an ALFRED big bubble in mn
left ear" and here [ jumped ND anc
down two or three times on nv left>foot
but to no purpose. As soon as stoned
he mounted a chair, and commenced
feeling the top of my head
Was your family ever troubled witt
epilepsy says he.
Only the two boys, says 1; I" whel
they catch them, my wife always goes a
them with fne-tooth comb, the frs
thing"
Jumping of the chair, he hit me 4
kick in the ribs that nearly knocked m
over; and before I had time to remor
strale, his arms were around my nee
and his head pressed against my bosom
the same way that Sophia Ann does whe
she wants me to buy her some new Dor
nets aud things
- Just what thought, says he; Stu
bercrlosis and hemoptpsis, combine
with defect in the scapular membran
and ineipient phthisis !"
Heavens I" says ], whats that2
And cardiac disease.
No?" said /.
And pendardites +"
Thunder said L