Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1863-10-23

counted tho hours OF delay, . door would
suddenly open; and the tall young inan
would single out one man and march him
through tho open doorway to be seen no
more. .afav asam GGH @g1 s,H @t"s. -ra
By and by--that is after several hours
waiting-my turn came. ... hs5
"John Smith r. shouted the door. keeper.
p" That's me-" says L; with cheer from
the crowd; entered large square room
where two persons sat writing at table, and
the third; evidently the surgeon. was exam,
lining a man in the last stages of nudity.
One Of the Writers at the table, young
man with curly eyes and blue hair, nodded
TO me, and dipping his pen in the ink, com
menced- .... .....r
John Smith. what's your name !"
John Smith," Gays |. " ..-'. q.
g Where were you born :"
T" Podunk, Maine" .I ..'H .Ur
:" What did your grcat.grandfather die
Darned II I know" says I. H' a
"Call il hapentao," says he; and your
grandfather too ~ X, :. s.. .,- -
don't care what you call it," says I, for
| was a Titled rlled by his nonscnsicai qucs-
ton.
"Did you ever have boils :" ."s ..
Not boil" .r- .r
, D. :" o., fits p s..s ..., .s..... fur...p
"Nary fit" t.-..s............
"Or delirium trcmens :"
No sir ee r. -..- -r .
"Or rickct?" .....
"l'il ricket you." for thought he meant
something else. .".'2 a
= Did you ever have the measles ?" says
he. ..-...t..l-... all. o..
"Or the itch ?" -..'.-
's /" Yes, SIR" said T." that ere fist land
showed very large brown one within three
inches Of his nose.) has been itching for the
last ten minutes to knock your pcsky head
of you little, mean. low lived, contemplate
whelp. YOU"
My dear sir" said the mild spoken, gen.
tlenanly surgeon, laying his hand on my
arm "calln yourself, Ipray. Don't let your
angry passions rise, but take off your clothes,
30 can see what you arc made Of"
= Do suppressed my anger, and with.
drawing to q corner, hung my clothes upon
the f6or. and presented myself for examina-
tion, clad only with the covering nature had
given me, except about . square inch Of
court. .plaster on my right shin, where had
fallen over chair, tbs night before feeling
for a match. -.
Young man." said the surgeon looking
me straight in the eye, "you have got the
Yes, sir" said I, "and good one, too
IA little Bininger, with drop Of Stoughton,
makes an excellent eye.opener, Of morn.
ing" 4as a .'eH.. .. 5aagf# ?
"And there seems to be an amaurotic ten
deney OF the right eye, accompanied with
ophthalmia." ...
Showr' saysI. s'# -". @'1. .- 2"
And the white spot in the left eye DO.
tokens = cataract" ~aa. az saiiHg
~ guess you mean the air." says l.,
cause went in swimming this morning.
and got an ALFRED big bubbis in my left ear, !"
aid here l Jumped up and down two or three
times on my left foot, but to no purpose. As
soon as stopped, he mounted chair and
commenced feeling the top OF my head.
Was your family ever troubled with. .epi.
"Only the two boys" says I, #" and when
they catch them, my wife always goes at
them with Anc tooth comb, the first
thing" ag .l
Jumping of the chair, he hit me lick in
the ribs that nearly kaocked sne over, and
before had time to reinonstrate, his arms
were round my neck and his head pressed
against my bosom the same way that Sophia
Ann does, when she wants me to buy her
some new bonnets and things. lt..,
just what thought" said he, "tuber.i
cu'osis and hemoptysIs, combined with de.
feet in the scapular membrane and incipient
phthysis." "a. g s'a5
Heavens ~ says !, "what's that p"
And cardiac disease"
"No n said 7. fig ar.saF
And pendardites r. ..... .f,.ss.4
Thunder I" said I.
stop talking! Now count after me-
/" One r said I, half dead with fright.
Asthma! Two" a' a4g
Two," yelled. 80. ......lf
"Exotis Of the right febula Three -
Three" gaspcd. "
" Coxalgial Four" a n
Murder r. said T." Four.'
Confirmed duodenum Of the right ven-
''Oh doctor dear doctor, aint you most
through? l feel faint" 49,
Through? No, not half through. Why,
my friend, Pandors's box was nothing to
your chest. You have sphy aixans, and eIo.
rious, and conchoilogis, and persifage, and"
Here my knees trembled 80 l leaned
against the table for support.
And permanent luxation of the anteYfot
lobe of the right phalanx." aj
Ny only answer Was . deprecatory ges-
lure.
"And scrofa.ous diathesis and omnipo.
iites." sat td9 h9e'ia
sank. to the floor ia utter despair.
I" Elutriation !" he yelled, for Re saw I was
going fast" and maxillrium, and"
WhenI woke 10 consciousness again. /
found myself in q Puddle of water, an empty
bucket near by. and the surgeon astride my
chest shouting in my car, Of which however
conh hear nothing. sniiA
II smiled fsebly in acknowledgement Of
bis attentions. At = sign from him, two at
tendants drew near, and having lifted him
into q chair, for he was absolutely black in
the face with the violence of his excrtiops.
they no sted me into . perpendicular and the
examination proceeded. n s,y4e8s5 r3if
But will not harass your feelings by Re.
peating the heart tending details. Suffice Il
to say that | waa afflicted with gasssits, em
pysemation, n1afcidity, emphema, obesity,
condyie Of the numerous. bilicose veins. her
mia In both great toes, and hemorhoids IN the
LETT heel, besides Ion Of other diseaaes whose
names j cannot remembeg.g Finally. after
. rigid kxamination Of my,toe. ssils IN. search
drew long breath, wiped the preparation
from his face with . stEay nswspapes, and