Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1862-1865, 1863-11-11
ARTENUS WARD AMONG TIE SHAKERS-HIS
"YAYING" EXPERIENJE WrH TWO PRETTY

ARTENUS WARD AMONG TIE SHAKERS-HIs
"YAYING" EXPERIENJE WITH TWO PRETTY
SHAKERESSE5.
Artemus Ward, in this weeks "vanity Fair" gives
some Of his experience with the Shakers:
sot down to the table, and the female in the mes
bag poured out taa. She sed nothn, and for hve
miDis the only live thing in that room was old wood
en- clock which tickt in subdood and bashful manner
in the corner This dealt stiffness made Uneasy
and determined TO talk the female bust 3d.
l. " marriage is again your rules, bleeve, marin"
"Yay."
"TOs sexes lv strictly apart spect"
"Yay."
"fs kinder siDger," SEE I, putin on my most sweet
est look and speskn in xinnn voice, "thst so fair
made As thoW never got bched to likely feller-
IN. B-Sbe was upward Of forty, and homely as Q
stump fence, buE l ttswt I'd bekil her)
swell, dusno" SEE "they're rayther important part
of the population. don't scarcely see how We could
git along without EN-"
"Us poor wmun folks would git along great des
better il there was no men"
"Ycu'l e1case me marin, but don't think that ain
would work. IL wouldn't be Ieger.
Il am afraid Of men !" eaid see.
''rhars unnecessary, harm. You amt in no danger
| Don't fret yourself on that plot"
"Here we're shot out from the sinful world Here al
| ia peas Here air brothers and sisters. We dom
marry, and consistently have domestic difficulties
Husbands doh't abooze their wyes-wves don't worr
their husOan5 Tnere 10 no cnnufen mere 70 WORTH Us
Nothn to Worrit US here. No wicked matrimony here
Would thow like TO be Shaker2'
"No," seq |, ''it amt my stile."
had histed in 3, big load of pervishuns as
could carry comfortable, ana leapin back in my chair
oommenst picking my teeth With fork. Toe female
went out, leavin me all alone with the ccck. hadn'
co. thar long before the elder poked hs head in at Lt
door. You're a sinful mani" he sed, and grosneC
i and went asay.
Directly thar cum 10 two young Shateresses as putty
aud slick lookin gals met IL Is roo, they
drest In meal bags lihethe old one I'd prevsely
and their shiny silky har hid from sight by loDl
white caps SIGH spose female costs wear but tbe
eyes sparkled like Tose and they charmin enu
make man throw SUNS at his srdmother, if they
axed him TO- They oommenst clearin away the disher
stin shy gsnces al all the time. | got excited
forgot B1.sy Jane in my raper, and sez my pref
" dears, bow are your
ave air all WELL" they solumGly said.
"Whar's the old man ?" Ted /, in soft voice.
'0f whom dost thou speas, B other Uriah =
81 mean the gay aud resye Gus who calls me man
of sin. Shouldn't woEder il his name was Uriah"
"He has retired"
"Wal, my pretty dears" siz l. 'et's have some fun.
Let's play puss in the corner. What sayF
Air you a Shaker, sir 2" they axed.
avail, my pretty dsars, bav'nt arrayed my proud
form in long weskit yit but if they ali like you
perhaps I'd jim en-. As it il, am Shaker protein
poraIy."
They was full fun. / seed that at fust only they
vas little skeery. tawt puss In the and
SIGH like phase, end We had nice me keepin quiet OF
course SO the old man shouldn't h,ar When We broke
up, seq /, 'my pretty dears, 60 you have OBJ
jec.ions EaE you 10 an innersent kiss at partin p
"Yay," they sed, and yGyd.