The Potter journal. [volume] (Coudersport, Pa.) 1857-1872, 1863-03-04
ma. The Pound Law is in force!

Bg That much prosecuted race-the old
bachelor-is ably defended in the following
spicy excerpt. We could, if we chose, COM
mend it to some whose case it would suit
exactly:
bachelors are styled by married men who
have put their foot into it as only half-per-
fected beings, cherries vagabonds, but halt
pair of scissors, and many other titles are
given them; while, on the other hand, they
extol their state as one of perfect bliss. that
q change from earth to heaven would be
somewhat of doubtful good. If they are so
happy, why don't they enjoy their happiness
and hold their tongues about it? What do
half the men get married for Simply that
that they may have some one to darn their
stockings, sew buttons on their shirts, and
trot their babies that they may have some
body, as married man once said, "to pull
off their boots when they are little balmy.
These fellows are always talking of the lone
illness of bachelors. Loneliness. indeed
Who is petted to death by ladies who have
daughters invited to tea and to evening
parties and told to drop in just when it is
convenient The bachelor. Who lies in
clover all his days, and when he dies has
flowers strewed on his grave by the girls who
couldn't entrap him The bachelor. Who
strews flowers on the married mans grave
His widow Not bit of it; she pulls down
the tombstone that a six weeks grief has set up
in her heart, and goes and gets married again
she does. Who goes to bed early because
time hangs heavily on his hands? The mar
ried man Who has wood 10 split, house
hunting and marketing to do, the young ones
" +i,o l., IN locl- ftar
The married man. Who is taken up for whip
ping his wife? The married man. Who gets
divorced? The married man. Finally, who
has got the Scriptures on his side The
bachelor. St. Paul knew what he was talking
about-"He that marries does well but he
that marries not does better"
We clip the following advertisement from
an Eastern paper:
~ have lived solitary lorg enough. want
somebody to talk to, quarrel with-then kiss
and make up. Therefore | am open TO pro-
possls, from young ladies and young widows
of more than ordinary respectability, toler-
ably tame disposition and hair of any color
but red As near as l can judge of myself
am not over eighty or under twenty-five years
of age In height am five feet eight, or eight
feet five, sure Weight, l35, 3l5, 5l3, one of
the three recollect each figure perfectly well,
but as to their true arrangement am some
what puzzled. Have whole suit Of hair,
dyed by nature and free from dandruff. Eyes
-brindle, tinged pea-green. Nose
blunt, according to the Ionic style of archi-
lecture, with touch of the composite; mouth
between a catfsh's and an alligator s-made
especially for oratory and the reception of
large oysters. Ears long, and elegantly
shaped Ny whiskers are a combination of
dog hair, moss and briar bush-well behaved,
and fearfully luxuriant. l am sound in limb
and on the niger question, wear boots No. 6,
when corns are not troublesome, and can
write poetry by the mile, with double rhyme
on both edges-to read backward, forward,
dagenally or crosswise. Am domestic ami.
nal, and very docile when towels are clean
and shirt buttons are all right. l say my
prayers every night, mosquitoes permitting,
and as to whether | snore in my sleep, want
some one to tell me. Money is no object, as
l was never troubled with any, nor never ex.
pect to be-"