The Hillsdale standard. [volume] (Hillsdale, Mich.) 1851-1909, 1863-06-09
A. Ward Meets BOiIeau, the Cop
pcrhcad Editor. q.

u r pcrhcad Editor. essa ~
Wun ovtbo Potts, IforgitSwitch WIN, sez
"tbe proper study Of Il ankind is man." but
to understand human natur perfckly requires
sum nolege'of the other animal ex fur instance
snsix! There's grato eel Of human natur
in snaix!I td mid elt 4" h sjhl q 90
Speakin ov snaix, reminds me ov incident
which happened to me the other day. l was
a travelling 10 the cara, wen man cum 10
with a countenance witch looked ,ez if il had
been billed and the skum not properly tux off,.
He was accompanied by very young man
in very durty yaller shu'e of close, The
young man starred hard atme, whereupon ]
said 10 my most insnnooatin manner, You're
sarvaint, sur; du yu SO euy thing green about
mc?" ,ra.,
"Neigh, revrent sur" he replied, purmit
me TO INTRODUCE to WI patrid."
"Wheer abouts." scz 1.
"Hur" sez J.. (This was spoke sarkasticle,
fur hate travelling patriots Ike dog ply
"Nothing to speak on, sezhe, al am sim.
ply an umbal patriot" g" z a'.l+..A =
elbow much kin yu make week at it? {"
sez l 4" II its followed up well i.auly vr
"Sur," sed he, 81 am surprised at such
Ieverty. ! make woonds by it sur; also stripes,
likewise imprisingments. / hev been incar-
cenated in fortress Lafayette, sur"
Indeed" sez L. ea5s 59iag iot gsl
"Yes sur" sez he az wos incarcenated in
that fedral bastill, becoz / void not abay a
tiranuickle government" lsee' sfsoal p
"Sumpthng like Jno. w. Hampton" sed
I, wen he obdjectcd to settling his skule taxi"
I" Its rayther singular to find pease man
who is also patriot. / shuld like to hev
yure wax figger in my show"
'SYou fatter me-" sez be.
"Not TALL" sez 1. "Wot other bizness
du you foller wen times is dull!" .. -,.
I" | am nedtur," sez he +" | tols Mr. Liukun
wot tbort Of him, sur, in my paper. sur. /
tole him the wor WOE a unholy war. That
rebi's. woz fitin fur thar burtbrites an the
constitution. That J. Davis woz a crate man,
an nobody couldn't stop him. l apeIed to
the peple, sur. ! tole them to arise in thar
mite and magersty, hurl A. Linkup from
power, an ade the south in bur noble effort to
save tho Union. Fur this, SUR l was incar-
centratcd in a dungeon"
SLOW did WI git out?" ses I. "Woz yu
iOs iOooo ou tu0 III VI IIOCus IOCu6
"Neigh, sur" sed he. II woz deprived of
my constitutional rite tu that rit, which was
arrested from King John by the bowld barreus
at Rennymeede, an witch hez been wottered
by the bud ov our sires and antsisters."
/" But how did you get outi" sez l.
The inadjesty ov the stait ov Pennsilv en- :
ier," he contnnered, hez bin vierlated in my
umbel person-tbat mitey stait witch woz
foundered by W. Fl. Penn, in pease-witch
wos purshast by him frum the noble red man
ov the forrest"
" "Ingins is pizeu wheresever found" sez I.
"How did you get out?"
"The Legislator ov my natiff stait," he
coptinnered, sis resolvin-the Legislator ov
my natiff stait is going to avenge hur vier,
lated suvvereignty."
"My fren," see I, "my patriotic fren, ky.
CRIB these flitos Of imadgernatiop, subdoo these
fours ov retterick, an inform me, o, inform
me,
" let me not bust In Ignorants."
but inform mellow did you git out ~
Sez he, very short, ~ would not bough
down an take the oath. woz released on
my pay roll of honor" 1e~
"Yu owdacious cus," sed I, "a mtey site
meaDer than Limburg cheese is yure pay roll
of honor. Wy, sur, my mortal little monkey
is smart kompared tn yu. My kobra wouldn't
associate with yu. My wax fgger Of Smith,
the wife murderer, wud skorn tn ware yure
close. Wy, sur, it air privilege TO take the
othe of legance. take il sur, 10 the morn.
in when rize an brethe the are of freedom.
l take it wen l lye down at mite seizure in the
protection Of my country. administer the
othe tu my famerly. teech ittu my inuo-
cent children. Yu a patriot! Shadder of
G. Washington defend US, if the sovereignty
ov you're natiff stait is lodged in yore person,
in my opinion thares miety little to keep it
from folling tu the ground. Vile yu air lose,
sur, onest men hev no pleasure in bein free.
Wen yu are tuckt up-then the rites of onest
men air seizure. My son, Andrew Jackson
Ward, sur, is corporal in the army of the
Union. He martches mex to the man who
kerrys the flag. The rebels ma shtte at him,
but his dooty is to hold unto biz FIRE till the
last momint for the defence of that glorious
flag. An vile them iguorent ruffins air a
levin tbare guns at his manly brest, yu, sur,
an sutch abandoned, cowardly villains ez WI,
sur, air tellin EN- ware TO aim. Yu are a
telln EN- to stan tbare ground, an tu Gre on
the Stars and stripes witch my son may even
now be BARN proudly in the face ov the foe.
II sarved yu rite, sur, void take you by
the sc-uft of yure worthless neck an the sete
Of yure worthless neck an the sete of yure
close, carry yu out onto that platform an drop
you onto the tract, wen the kars culd mangle
yure rotten flesh, an grind yure disreppytabie
bones to powder!
Sez he, lookn kind o. skeart, :" the Legis-
latoor ov ny natif stait--" sr ,.,.are1o.
"Cuss the Legislator ov yure naliff stait,'
see /. IL hev no stitch snaix in ny show
South Carolina adopted the sa,tle snaik as
the emblem ov hur suvcreignty-but yure
Legislator hez chuzo meaner an more
pizenos reptylc-thc copperhead. Ny feeble
opinion is sur, that ather w. Penn diddent
git good title, or he left nc legiernste ares,
and the sovereignty ov yure natiff stait hcz
reverted to the pizen Iogius agir, witch woz
the oridgipal possessors." .'
Here the whistle blode far Johnstown, ware
l got out an exhibited my moril entertain.
mert, at the usual price, to large an truly
patriotic audgence ov American cityz ,ns.
Eg- Tho Rebel debt, Il divided equally
among tho inhabtants OF the Confederacy