St. Cloud Democrat. [volume] (Saint Cloud, Stearns County, Minn.) 1858-1866, 1863-04-23
d. STEARNS CO., MINNESOTA, THURSDAY, APRIL &3 1863
Ere we parted, arkst for draught ov

water to squench me thirst, an the dam
sd tript gayly out ov the door to procur
fit. As she was gone considerable peri
cd, lookt out the winder and saw he
hoppin briskly 4th, accompanied by 2 Sc
eesa cusses, who war armd to the teeth
T begin to smell as many as 2 mouses.-
The ''putty dear" had discovered was
Yankee, and was going to have me took
en- prisoner. I frustrated her plans few
i leapt ont the:Rack winder as quick a
q Prestidiguretaterandisch; an when sh
entered the domicil, she found "brothe
John'' non ester (wich is Latin or some
thin) and be4 had proceeded much,
found me Time1epe non ester too
The fare maid, who was Floyd's Neece
had hookt it while reposin on me weskit
It was hunky watch---a family hair
loom, and I woodn't have parted with
fer a dollar & s1xty-nine cents (Sl.69.)
In doc corse ov mail, arrow in Rich
mon. I unfolded me mission, ali wa
ushered into j. Davis orgust prcsepts.-
He'd jist returned from his speeehifyi1
tower.
s'Tap us your Alpper, ole Covy," sez
adarcssin him in the F. +. VS. approved
dierlict. ~s"s~...
"Make known your bizness," sez he
"l'm gittin up a proclamation for the ex
termination o9 the hole Yankee nation
and airn't got much leisure for emmy
other ockupation."
T come, J" sez I, "on a mission Of peas
Yezr Copperhead friends in the North
viii soon cease to exist, eff things carnt be
arranged to prohibit the Unionisti from
tcar,n the Cons:itoosh."
"What terms do you ofer?" queried
JEFF.
WALL" sez I, ~ air instructed by the
Cop2erheads (Wood, Stiles & Co, you
know 2 ,propos anything which will most
disgrace the North. You kin take your
niggers all over creation, incloodin Jar.
sey."
t:Wood that be Constitutional ?" arskt
J. =, with a sly twinkle ov his eye.
co." sez |, ''its matter of no differ
ence how much you chaps brake that ar
tiki to sever the Union, SO the Republi-
cans air stopt from doin the same to keep
sed Union together. That's what your
nuth rem chums warnt to see dun"
"Wal," sez the Confed Pres, "ef your
Gov y'ment will let US secesh, and will pay
all cur depts, an give US Brute Butler to
hang, We might cum to terms"
lis thar nothing else you Good wish p
"Wal, ycs-give US all the Territories. :"
'Nothin' else p
"Trow in 2 or 3 free States-New York
Penna, au N massachusetts,, furinstuus."
''Nothin else?"
"You might mcleod old Ljnkon's he'd"
"Carn't you think of nothin else 2"
"Yes-in footer we must have all we
arsk.''
81. Davis" sez I, 81 hev no doubt
your friends in the north wood make all
these concessions, an more too; but it has
just occurd to me that thar was nothin
said to Old Abe about 1t bel | left Wash
ington~ Shouldn't wonder eff he'd object
to the plan some. But your democrat
friends air doin all they kin for you"
II know" sez j. D. =; Gan that's what
keeps our spirits up. We air waitin for
'em to git in power, & and then we expect
to get all We arsk. An yet Us Shivalry
consider 'em the contemptiLlest set of dirt
eaten towards in the North. We Good
buy 'em all with Ccnfed ShinpIaster."
Those Was my opinion 2.
Jeff arskt me to to stop and take 7 with
him, and I kindly stopt. Eff Secesh
President don't git ennything better fer
the stummick's sake, as Somebody sez,
than was on that table, then may A. W =,
jr., be preserved from sich fate The
Meat was neovta site.
"P1ars you've eten better Pork than
this, but it's the best I've got," sez JEFF:
eyes,, sez / "that's putty mean Ham,
but I've seen laundering side meaner in
Washington"
"What kinds that ?'' he demanded-
"Vallandig-ham!'
"After supper, sottish-lookin chap en-
tered, who staggered up to jeff. throwed
up his hat, an shouted:
"Nother vic-hic-tory! Wash'nton tax
en- pris' 'ner-hic! Ole Abe Greedy cap
tured-hic! Horace Linkon badly killed
and George B. McBurnside s'rnd'rd -
bic.
The cuss was old John Letcher, in his
famus roll ov the Drupkard. John only
gifts tight once year, which is on New
Years.
N: Bile stays drunk till the next
New Years.
But I returned to Washington disgust
ed with all peace measures The sympa-
thizers may do their own dirt-eatln in the
footur,: as they have done in tho parst.
An pcrchans--
Ever ov you, A. WARD JR.
BIG AvERAGE.--The sheep brought to
this county in the fall of 1861. were shear