Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-01-27
witty EXaggeratIOns.
instances of wild and extrayigant humor

are as common as proverbs. ---
Everybody has heard of the weather
which was 50 cold that the mercury went
out of sight, and which no doubt would
have been a good deal colder if the Their
mometeT bad been long ennugh.
a similar exaggerstIon was that Of a
young man whotook calUmelon morning
SO cold that the mercury ran down into his
boots.
The following are illustrations Of this
kind of exRggeration also: .--... 90.
The man out West whose legs are 50
long that be he's to 80 down cellar to tie
his Shoes - ..lf .- f.-.-l-
The man whe is 80 large that be has to
get out OF doors to turn over. .--.. e. 10
The man who snOred SO loud that be had
to sleep over in the next street to keep from
wal ening himself rs-E.l ,s's-aE
The man whose nose is so long that he
has to step forward three PAGES to reach
the end of it.
The man who was 50 largo and heavy
that bis shadow killed Little boy shea
| it, fell on him ga ..-.r .-- .-- -
The man who was so fat that his shadow
left greasy trail on the road as he walked
along; and the man who was so thin that
Z u
And among these deserves to rank the
| horse that rsnsso fast around the ring that
the spectators c5uId only see one continual
circular horse together with tha more fa-
nous racer, that ran so swiftly about arena
that he nearly caught up with himseli. aud
could see hisown tail just before him. --
a New IpEA.-Oid Cloetite Crowded
+ Out.-Ameng the patients ofthe Genera |
Hospital, at Pbiladelphia. is a secesh sol
| der. lie was very sick when first brought
there, but is row doing better. lie is n
grabbed customer. Now that be is reeov-
eFing, his burlinese begins to show itseirin
! a manner that his comrades don't care
about putting up -with-at any rate from
! a secesh. ats' = era ,yes
\ In tho Same ward with him Is Union
soldier an adopted citizen. from the land
OF Erout. Yesterday morning a Union
Dutch soldier said something to seeosh =
Seeesh vouchsafed oRlyin reply. ti f-ETi
Go TO HI e. .--.F.-'. v...sa
.s DO vat!'- -.'t rEaEss 49, s. !',z.uEt
,SeeesA repeated his remark. -. .ssssl
f.. The putehman wns not at oil exasper-
ated. ri. ..,-g - SIS >. = -
'Ab, said he, mine you isb too kind.
cannot gesto dat place. sl. s-tr
Why nUt1' .ss.s.1 7ef s4s..,5. ..--rt
1T isnow foil. 1t is worry crowded dera.
Sigel, he fill it up nit der repels. Even
dere tuylul has to sleep QUITO doors.', ssi
Tbe laugh come IN bore from the boys
who we're Longing areued. Ssessh had
nothing more tosay-s, jss5 s..e = b lsti
| .a Ys7rses q = y r---- III - 3 81 -Gsgs
.Ask1SG roo MueH "A little boy we'll Ia
his boots for the first sine, Aaid to his mo.
ther after reading tho customary chapter
in SCOTS family Bible - en- sea ed
'Mother, why, did not Moses wear
| bo9tsp uz-uE - Era 7ss g. uafrg y fla,sfi
Why, my son. what makes you ask thar
Perhaps he did {; " do NOS know sI.s5
No., mother, be did not, because the
BiOle says that the voice that camo out Of
the burning bush.t0ld him to take of his
shoes .-.-r ~ s--.sl.t =.
The mother made no reply to this clinch
err -gIf asisfS ~ ~ 81 5lHtgaJ
Here is an. Interesting scrap from the
prayer of man who was in the Labit Of
filing up the breaks in his petition with
syllable err: -r - sala.7.I ~ g.
20 Lord we pray for. our poor brother.
who has lived for more than ten wears on
the L9rd,s side-er, end has one foot IN the
graEeJer and the other al but-sr.' j.,
What have you to remark, madam a.
boutmy singipg?' Nothing IFS not re-
markabie,' ,--f-i.. =
The man who has raised eabbagehead
has done moro good than all the meta
physicians in the world. Then" re-
pied wag: your mather ought to have
premium"
The distinction between lkihg and ios
ing was well made by little girl, six years
old. She was eating IN egg at break fast,
whieh'sh seemed 10 relish very mGeh.-.
Do you love II p asked her aunt, No.
replied The little child, with-a look of dis,
gust like it. III loved it, should kiss
il.