Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1863-03-06
FACT, FUN AND FANCY.

- Modesty IN woman is like color on
her cheek decidedly becoming if not
put on.
The most intolerant and ferocous
Of human beings is your philanthropist
by trade.
is there any perceptible improve
ment in caterpillar when he turns over
new leaf?
What animal has the greatest guam
tity of brains? The hog, of course, for
he has hogshead full
= Because you happen to be rich,
don't think that the rest of mankind are
your supple slaves.
IF you allow yourself to be easily
annoyed, you will find any number most
anxious to do that business for you with
out charge.
To make home pleasant, carry a
sunshine on your face that knows no
cloud, a heart 10 your bosom that can en-
compass all around you.
= You are writing my bill on very
rough paper, said client to his solicitor
Never mind, said the lawyer, it has to be
filed before it comes into court.
We should be most especially on
our guard in the sunny days Of prosperi-
ty, lest our hearts get chilli the groves
of worldly pleasure and wanton enjoy
ment.
- It is said that when a Frenehman
has to wait, he smokes; German medi-
tates; an Englishman walks; but an
American swears, inyents some contor-
ton of the limbs, and tries to put his feet
up higher than ever.
BARRY CORNWALL says: leone,
let me dive into thine eyes" If his love
had swimming eyes," very good; but
at all events, our advice to the young wo-
men is, for divers reasons. don't let him
do it. He might go over "cataract. .
-OPIE was once engaged to paint the
portrait of lady, who, whenever she
thought the painter was touching the
mouth, screwed it up in most ridiculous
manner. Opie, who was blunt man,
said very quietly, Madam, if you wish
the mouth left out, | will omit it with
pleasure"
A Mr., n was about completing the
sale of horse which he was very anxi-
GUS to dispose of, when little urchin ap-
peared and innocently inquired: "Grand-
pa, which horse are you goin' to sell, dat
one you built fire under Yesterday to
make him draw" The bargain was at
an end.
- Childhood is like mirror, catching
and rejecting images from all around :
Remember that impious or profane
thought uttered by parents lips may
operate upon the young heart like care
less spray of water thrown upon polished
steel, staining it with rust which no scour.
ing can efface.
= One day, Freddie's little sister Car
rie, hearing her father and mother talk
ing about name for new little baby
brother that had been given to them
short time before, said {" Mamma. why
don't you name him HallowedY" II saws
in my prayer, " Hallowed be thy name,
and l think it's very pretty name, too ~
- Somewhere in the West, sable
knight of the lather and brush was per-
forming the operation of shaving Hoo
sier with dull razor.
Stop" said the Hoosier, 'that won't
do"
whats the matter, sab p
That razor pulls"
A" Well, no matter for dat sab, if de
handle OBJ dis razor don't break, de baird's
bound to come off,"
- Once upon time, runs an oriental
story, young and lovely woman was
called upon to mourn the death of her
lord As she loved him in life with all
the fervor of alteration, her grief at his
decoase was inconsolable. She filed the
air With plants; declared herself the
most wretched of women; and, in the in
tensity Of her grief, made vow that she
would wed no new lord, till the stream
that ran by her bower should reverse its
course A few weeks later, she ,oas seen
busi'y engaged an donming up the stream
= The private secretary of cabinet
minister Is wag. The other day young
man, decidedly inebriated walked into
the executive chamber and asked for the
governor.
:" What do you want with him ~ in
quired the secretary.
ION, want an Office with good sala-
ry--a sinecure."
" can tell you something better for
you than a sineeure--you had better trv
a ioater cure.
A new idea seemed to strike the Young
ioebriate, and be vanished