The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1863-06-11
Prom shs n. Y, Sunday Mercury
"The Honest Abe's" Parable.
BIZ oRPHEUs c. KERR.

which this good pen Of mine cannot refrain
from writing. A high moral political chap
from the Sixth Ward having learned that
there was a pleasing clerical vacancy III the
Treasury Department, sought hasty inter
view with the Honest Abe, and says he
Il am a member of our excellent National
Democratic Organization, which is at this
moment eligible for office, on the score Of far
more true loyalty to the Union Of our Fore
fathers than can be found in any other organ
ization of the present distracted period.
will admit" says the genial chap, in a fine
burst Of honesty, that our Organization has
done much for the sake of the South IN times
past /; | will admit that we have seemingly
sided with the Sunny South for the sake OF
our party. | will admit" says this candid
chap, with q slight cough, that our excel
lent Democratic Organization has at times
seemed TO sympathze with our hayward sis
tiers for the sake of itself as an Organization.
But, now" says the impressive chap, najes-
tically, "haying heard the recent news from
Connecticut, the excellent Organization Of
which / am a part stands ready to sacrifice
everything for the sake of the Union, and de-
mands that it shall be admitted to all the
privileges of undisguised loyalty" Here the
excited chap bushes ingenuOusly, and says he,
"Any little offices you might have to dispose
Of would be acceptable to the Organization OF
which | am prominent part"
The Honest Abe was wiping the blade Of
his jack knife with his thumb at the time, and
says he
'What you say about the present willing
ness Of the Organization to sacrifice every
thing for the sake of the Union, neighbOr, re-
minds me of a small tale. When | was beat
ing the praries for clients i'll Illinois, says
the Honest Abe, smiling at the back Of the
hand III which he held the jack-knite, ''when
/ was stalking for clients l knew an old 'un
named Job Podger, who lived at Peoria"
Here the Honest Abe leaned away over the
arm of his chair toward the attentive political
chap, and says he:
'.Podger didn't know as much as would fill
a four-inch spelling book but he had enough
money to make education quite dispensable,
and his wife knew enough for all the rest Of
the family. This wife was very good wo
man in her way" says the Honest Abe, kind
ly ''she was a very good woman i'll her ways
and made my friend Podger 50 happy at home
that he never dared to go away from home
without her permission. Her temper" saay
the Honest Abe, putting one of his feet upon
the sill of the nearest window, ''her temper
was of the useful nature to keep my friend
Podger and the children sufficiently warm all
the year round, and | don't think she ever
called Job Podger an old fool except when
company was present. If she had one pecul-
iarity more than another, it was this she was
always doing something for Podger'S sake"
Here the political chap was at this moment
sliced with a severe cough; but the Honest
Abe only smiled pleasantly at his jack-knife,
and went on:
''She was always doing something for Pod
gers sake; did she have tea party or a
quilting bee, it was solely for the sake Of Pod
ger; did she refuse to contribute for the fund
of the heather, it was solely on account OF
Mr.. Podger. But her strong point i'll this
matter" says the Honest Abe leaning back
in his chair against the wall, and scraping
the sole of his left boot with his knife, ''her
strong point was, that she endured great
deal Of suffering for Podger's sake. Did she
sprain her ANGLE on the cellar stairs, she would
say, Just see what | suffer for your sake, Pod
gerv Did she have a sick headache from
drinking too much young hyson, she would
tie up her face in camphor, and say, Only
see, POdger how much | bear for your sake :!
Did she catch cold from standing too long be-
fore a dry-goods shop window, she would go
and sit iii dark room with flannel stocking
round her neck, murmuring, i was goose
ever to marry such q fool Of man as you be
but | am willing to suffer even this for yOui
sake In fact, says the Honest Abe, com
mencing to cut his nails, 'in truth, that wo-
man was always suffering for Podgers sake,
and Podger felt himself to be guilty man.
One day, | remember, my friend Podger and
his wife were going to Chicago to buy new
set OF turs for Podger's sake, and Just as Pod
ger got comfortably rested i'll his seat in the
car, the suffering woman ate lozengc, anC
says she, i shan't be fit to live, Podger, i
you don't so out to the baggagc-car again
and make certain sure that thall get all oul
baggage Now Podger had been out six
times betors to see about the same thing
says the Honest Abe, earnestly, he'd beer
out six times before, and began to feel wrathy.
Our baggage says he, OUR baggage, Mrs
Podger! Here my friend Podger grew very
red in the face, and says he, i rather like
that, you know-OUR baggage two brass
bound trunks and covers, belonging to Mrs.
Podger; three carpet-bags and one recticule
the property of Mrs. p; two bandboxes and
a green silk umbrella, belonging to Mary Jane
Podger; three shawls tied up in a newspaper.
and two baskets, owned by Mrs. NJ. J, Pod
ger; one clean collar and razor, carried by
job Podger; OUR baggage! Here my frieni
Podger attempted to laugh sardonicalIy be-
hind his collar, and came near going straight
into apoplexy. Wonld you believe it p says
the Honest Abe poking the political chap in
the ribs with his jack knife would you be
heve 1t? Mrs. Podger burst at once into bit
ter tears, and says she, Ooh! a hoo-hoo-hoo
TO think | should have to suffer in this way
for my own husbands sake" II wasn't long
after that says the Honest Abe lowering
his tone, 1T wasn't long after that when Mrs
?. took violent cold. on her lungs. from
standing too longon the damp ground at a
camp meeting for Podgers sake. and was soon
q very sick woman.
what particularly frightened nv friend
Podger was, that she didn't say that this was
for his sake for two whole DAYS, and in his
horror OF mind he went and brought clergy
man to see her. This clergyman says the
Honest Abe, with reverence ofmanner, this
clergyman was not one of those sounbre, for
lorn pastors, who would make you think that
it is grievous thing to be priest unto your
benlgnant Creator; he rather indicated by
ms ever cheerful manner that the only perpet-
ual happiness is TO be found in a life of pious
ministration. When he followed my friend
Podger to the bedside, he smiled encourage
ingly at the sick Mrs. p and rubbing his
hands, and says he. How do We find ourselves
now, my dear Madam? Are we about TO die
this pleasant morning.: She answered him
teebly, says the Honest Abe, feelingly, she
answered him feebly, for she was very weak
She said that she feared she had not snent her
life as she should, but trusted that the pray
ers she had breathed during her hours Of main
would not be answered. All said she i
feel that could suffer still more than have
suffered, Cor my intercessofs sake. The mo-
ment she uttered these words, my friend Pod
ger, who had been standing near the dor, the
very picture of misery, suddenly gave a start,
frightened up with look of intense Joy,
6eckoned the clergyman to follow him into
the kitchen, and fairly danced down stairs