davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25

A gentleman asked wag why 50 50
many of tho tall gentlemen were old
bachelors. The answer was '9a' '1Iy
we're Obliged to lie cornorwiso IN bed to
keen their feet in. and a wife would Oo
in the way
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25

Duties, Every man ought to pay
his debts-ifhe can, Every man ought
to help his ncighbor -ifho can hvery
man and woman ought to get married.
if he can. Every man should do his
work to suit his customers--lf he can
Everv man should please his wife 1T
he can. Every wife should sometimes
hold her tougue--if she can Every
LAWYER should sometimes tell The truth
If he can. Every man should mind
ii. own business If he can.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25
Aoa istratOr's Notice.

4 GTra o! administration having
~ be lntea to the undersigned
atlhr Ulary term A, D. 1868, OF the
homo. rebate court of Noxubee
.oar.. ss,ssiPpi, on The estate OF
Jan -pIelt deceased, notice is
hr' .ar 10 all person indebted to
b. to come forword and
ate payment. and all per.
claims against the same
present them duly pro.
usierld within the time
aw, or they will be for.
nlhe Goth January 1868,
NM. NJ. CONNOR,
srif, and administrator.
1853. CIV
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25
tfstrator's Notice.


Ns 0. adminisuali n having
ranted 10 the undersigned al
Y term, 1868, Of the hon.
robate court of Noxube- coun.
sDppl, on The estate of Charles
nr, deceased, notice is hereby
all persons indebted TO the
talo come forward and make
.e payment, and all persons
Ialm< against the same are re-.
70 present them duly probated
s,ercd, within tn tine pre-.
by !aw rrhey will be forever
led ~ the Goth January, 1868.
VIM Nj. CONNOR,
Sheriff and Administrator.
~. Z, 1868, 6w
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25

tACoNic Gen Mitchell, the FEEDER
Al commander at Nashville, has ordered
the property of Dick McGann' the gn'T
IL, to be burned. The Chattanooga
Rebel says :.
Dick McCann has sent in his comPI'
ments to Mitchell "YOu may burn
and b-d," says Dick but if | don t
give you hi, my name amt Dick
NcCanu." And Dicks the boy to 90
what he saws.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25
NEGRO DOGS.

A BUROIl has Ben Walkers
dogs, and will attend those de.
sn,r'ng his services Address him nj
Barry P. o. Miss. "''' ~
JAN 27, 1868. If
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1863-02-25

A railroad bridge over the Long
Bridge, at Washington, has been com
plOed
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

OvERwoRK.-The majority of the IA
tai diseases arising from overwork are
now discovered. Give human being
overwork and deficient food, and he is
the victim Of diarrhna and dysentery.-
Give him overwolk and bad air and bad
food, and he is the victim of typhus.-
Give him overwork and bad air, and he
is the victim of consumption. Give him
over mental work, with whatever air and
whatever food, and he is the victim of
brain disease, and Of one or other of its
sequences; insanity, paralysis, diabetes,
premature death in any case death by
suicide not unfrequently. Give him
overwork purely physical, with air, with
food--and the laboring heart, trying to
keep up against its WEAKNESS, succumbs;
and so the overworked smith, boatman,
or wood HEAVIER, falls suddenly, not more
'honored than the prize fighter of to-day,
or the feet slave and gladiator of a past
and more barbarous age.--Dr. Richard
son.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

A CoNTRABAND PRAYER.-The fol
lowing prayer of a negro preacher at th'
funeral of a child, at a contraband camp
in Virginia, is better than many ablel
prayers on such occasions:
"Masser Jesus, jew of Jews, like dt
people of de ole time, de Jews, we weeE
by de side ob de ribber, wild de strings o
de harp all broke. But we sing de song
of de broken heart, as dem people
couldn't do. Hear US, King Jesus, now
we jess get froo de Red sea aud wander
in de dark wilderness, poor, feeble,
broken portion OBJ de children ob Adam
feeble in body, feeble in heart, feeble
in mind, and needs de help ob de good
mighty God. Oh, help us, eff you please,
to homes, for ives got no homes, Masser
Jesus, but the shelter OBJ de oak tree in
de daytime, and de Gotten tent at night.
Help US for our own good, and dc good
OBJ Gods blessed Union people, dat wants
all people free people, whatsumebber be
de color Jesus, Masser, you knows de
deep tribulation ob our hearts-dat sick
ness is among us-our children dyin'
fast in de camp, and as we tote dem from
one place TO tudder and bury dem in de
cold ground, Jesus, to 60 in sperrit to de
God oh all de people, where de soul hab
no spot, no color. Great Doctor OBJ doc.
tors, King oh kings, and God OBJ battles,
help US to be well. Help us to be able
TO fight wild de Union sojers de battles
for de Union. Help US to fight for liber-
ty-fght for de country-fight for our
own homes and our own free children
and our children's children. Fotch out,
God OBJ battles, de big guns, wild de big
balls, and de big bu'stin' shells, and glib
dem God-forsaken secesh, dat would
carry to shame our wibes and darters,
0, mighty Jesus, eff you please, a right
smart double charge of grape and canis-
ter. Make 'em glad to stop de war and
come back to shoes and de fatted calf,
and all de good tings OBJ de Union-no
more numbering brudders OBJ de North
states-no more ragged and barefoot
no more slave-whippers aud slave-sellers
no more faders of yaller-skins-no
more meaner as meanest niggers."
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13
WHOLE NO. 4Os.. ;
THE EDIF1oE OF ETERNAL REL1

The EDIF1oE OF eternal RELI>
GIoN.-The day when Jesus spoke these
words, THE hour cometh, and now is,
when the true worshippers viii worship
the Father in spirit and in trulb," he was
truly Son Of God. He speaks for the
first time the word on which will rest the
ediice Of religion. He founded the wor-
ship pure, without date, without country,
that which all lofty souls viii render to
the end Of Time. Not only was his reli-
gion, tina: day, the good religion Of hu-
manity,-it was the absolute religion
and if other planets are inhabited by
reasonable and moral beings, their reli-
gion can be no different from that which
Jesus proclaimed near Jacobs WE'LL
Man has not been able to hold to It, for
the ideal is reached only for moment.-
The word of Jesus was flash of light
in dark night. Eighteen hundred
years have been needed for the eyes of
humanity-to become wonted to it,
But the flash will become broad day, and
humanity, after having gone through all
the circles Of error, will return to that
word, as to the immortal expression of
II n
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

TURNING THE TABLES IN A SLAVE
TRADE.-A curious story is told, in an
account of the slave trade in Africa, of
the value Of knowledge of Englisb.-
A man sold his son to a slave trader, the
laws allowing him to do so. But the boy
understood and spoke English well, and
he insiuuated to the purchaser that his
father, being mature and strong, would be
much more efficient laborer than him
self, and that they had better take him,
which they did, to the affectionate pa
rents great discontinue. The father
pleaded that the law did not allow the
selling of a father by the son, but the
traders took him, and paid the purchase
money to the son.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

A ScoRcHING REBuKE.-A highly
instructive as wen as amusing incident
took place in one of the principal busi-
ness houses on one Of our streets, last
Saturday, while the colored regiment was
marching along to the music of the ma
tional airs. Several gentlemen were
looking on the parade, among them a
wealthy planter of Alabama, who is a
large stakeholder. One of the group
stepped out of the door, looked for few
minutes, and then Indignantly turning on
his heel, addressed himself to the grave
Alabamian, to the following purport:
We'll, III be id if that is not bur-
ming disgrace which no white man can
tolerate. Isn't that nigger regiment too
great an insult?'
The Alabamian jumped from bis feet
and replied, while his eyes flashed fire:
Sir, there is not negro in that regi-
ment who is not better man than re-
bel to this government, and for whom I
have not thousand times more respect
than | have for traitor to his country.
| think that the best possible use the
government can make of the negroes, is
to take them and make them fight
against the rebels. No traitor is too
good to be killed by negro, no weapon
too severe TO use against the wretches
who ara endeavoring 70 overthrow tho
government. Now, sir. swallow that,
you ike il or not
The rebel darted off in utter amaze
ment, without uttering syllable of reply,
leaving The sturdy Alabamian who cher
shed the jewel Of patriotism as some-
hing more precious than hocks of slaves,
alone in his glory.'-NasdriHe Union,
Oct. 5.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13
Fidelity.

But this was taught me by the dove
To die-and know no second love.
This lesson yet hath man to learn,
Taught by the thing he darcs to spurn
The bird that sings within the brake,
The swan that swims upon the lake,
One mate, and one alone, will take.
And let the fool still prone to range,
And sneer on all who cannot change,
Partake his jest with boasting boys,
/ envy not his varied joys,
But deem such feeble, heartless man,
Less than yon solitary swan.--BYRoN.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13
Copperhead Song in 1870.

No part nor lot in the glorious work,
No part nor lot had Il;
But sat like frog on an old hollow log,
And croaked to the passers-by.
Croak-croak-cro
There were many who paused to hear
And many more that Stacked their pace,
And turned them back in fear.
No part nor lot in the glorious work,
No part nor lot had |,
But l aimed my gun at the new risen sun,
And fired at its God-like eye.
Fire--fre-hre-
We thought we were many and strong,
And could humbug the nation with volleys o
words
To thinking right was wrong
No part nor lot in the glorious work,
No part nor lot hadI;
But trod the long grass where the patriots
would pass,
And sneered at their rallying cry.
Sneer-sneer-sneer-
'Tis a word with double edge,
And before it many runner has turned
To the homestead side o. his hedge.
No part nor lot in the glorious work,
No part nor lot had /;
Twas little / cared how the bondman Jared,
Though his chain clanked under my eye.
Clank-clank--clank-
No matter how heavy the pain,
No matter how cutting the steey lash,
But it fell DER a negros brain.
No part nor lot in the glorious work,
No part nor lot had l,
And when the air swells with the music Of bells,
/ only look down with sigh.
Bells-bells--bels-
They tell us the nation is free,
And the noble achievers co-workers with God
But, Cepperheads what are wei
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

LARGE FARM.-The largest farm in
this country is said to be owned by Mr.
Funk, who last year SO vehemently de-
nounced the opponents of the war in the
Illinois legislature. His farm is in Hi
nois on the prairie near Bloomington,
covering an area of 26,650 acres, or for
ty square miles. He has 5000 acres in
corn but the great bulk of the land is
devoted to pasturage, the main business
being the preparation of the cattle for
the market. He keeps 500 hogs to eat
up the waste corn left by the cattle, and
about 1000 sheep and 800 horses and
mules.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13
Sho |
AN ALLITEkATIvE ROMANCE

AN ALLITEkATIvE ROMANCE.
Sam Stubbs strolled slowly surveying
sunsets serene splendors. Sombre
shades solemnly surrounded sylvan
scenes. Sweet songsters softly sung sill
very strains. Stiffness seemed stepping
stocking sbod skyward sitting sound,
soothing sense, suggesting sentiment,
stilling strife, silencing sorrowing suffer
ing. Sleep seemed stealthily stealing
sluggish souls. Sam Stubs seemed sad.
Sam Stubs sighed So simoons sweep
ing savagely southward sometimes sigh.
Sam Stubs sighed sonorously. Still
Sam sauntered silently, seemingly sub
dued, softeneG, seraphized. Sans soft
susceptibility surrendered sometime
since, $50 sundry sage spinsters say.)
Seraphina Stiggins saw something sufli-
ciently sapient. So surely Sam Stubs
sought Seraphina Stiggins. Sans steps
'squashed snowdrops, sowbugs, sorrel.
Striped snakes stung Sam 5 stout soles
Sparrows snugly settled, shrunk suspi-
cio1sly, seeing Sans stupendous strides.
Still Sam sauntered silently. Suddenly
somebody shrieked ".Samuel Stubs n
Sam staggered, said scissors :" stopped,
surveyed surrounding space, spied Sera-
phina sitting solus, simpering sweetly.
So Sam stammered, Servant, Seraphi>
ma She seemed sentimentally satisfied. |
SO Sam, seeing Seraphina's suavity, said.
"slick sunset" Seraphina said "splend-
id, sweet Somehow speech seemed
scarce. Sans syntax sloped Sera-
phina's s livery syllables scampered
sbamefully. So sitting silently, Sam
stroked Sans shins. Seraphina stroked
seven-shilling silk. Stupid
silence ! Serapbina sighed. SO Sam
Stubs sighed. Soon she said solmnly,
Surely, sentimental souls seek sympa>
by; surely, Samuel, sadness sometimes
sleeps sympathetic souls" Sans speech
surely staid somewhere. Sam suffered.
sputtered, stammered. Sam said "Sho I"
Shakspearian shades See Seraphina
starting suddenly, standing scornfully, |,
canning Sans sprawling symmetry.
She sibllated. "Stupid simpleton shah
y, sheep-stealing, sneaking sniveller
ubservient subalternl Sooner shall
Stiggins seek scanty subsis>
ence scrubbing sinks, sooner scour small
lied stoves, sooner skin snakes, steal
teamboats, swallow shin-stamps SOON
+ sweep streets, sew shoes, split sails
ooner shingle shops, sell shaving strops
o o." Seraphina
topped, snivelling scornfully. Some
ngle souls see some slight severity
orinkling Seraphina's speech. Should s
ich scornfully survey Sans sin Sam q
lid ".&o!" q
Since Sans slip seventeen summers
lluted submissive sublunarians. Snow,
eet, sorrow, sin, severally saddened
Milling souls. Sunshine, sunbeams, =
lmmer showers, strewed sustaining ,
yeetness, soothing sorrow. Sh speak
'itly Sam Stubs sofa supports Sera-
nina Stubs! Substantial suppers
metimes sit severely. Sans sat So !,
eraphina sought some soothing syrup, !
me strong stimulant. Soon Sam seem. J,
sprightlier, SO smiling said, "Sweei :
'ouse, surely sentimental souls seek :.
Seraphina simply said ),
sho |-Sprinqtfeld Republican.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

WIVES AND CARPETs.-The Chicago
Journal thus learnedly philosophises OF
these themes. There is large streak
of sense in the reflections
In the selection of a carpet you should
always prefer one with small figures, foi
the two webs of which the fabric consists
are always more closely interviewer than
in carpetings where large figures are
wrought.
There is a good deal of true phloso-
ply in this that will apply TO matters
widely different from the selection Of
carpets. A man commits sad mistake
when he selects wife who cuts too large
a figure on the carpet of life-tbat is,
makes much display. The attractions
fade--the web of life becomes worn out,
weak, and all the gay figures that seem
ed so charming at first, disappear like
summer flowers in autumn. Many a
man has made flimsey linsey-woolsey Of
himself by striving to weave too large a
figure, and is worn out, used up, like old
carpets hanging on the fence, ere he has
lived out his allotted days of usefulness.
Many a man wears out like a carpet that
is never swept, by the dust of Incidence;
like that carpet he needs shaking or
whipping he needs activity-something
to think of, something to do.
Look out, then. for large figures and
there are those now slowed away in the
garret of the world, awaiting ther final
consignment TO the cellar, who, bad they
practiced this BIT of carpet philosophy,
would to-day be firm and bright as
Brussels fresh from the loom and every
body exclGiming, alt is wonderful how
well they DO wear
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13
RASBURGH. VERMONT FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 13 1868
The Kissing Parson.

In one of our New England towr
lived Deacon Brown, a staid, dignilie
sort of a Christian, and a model of pre-
priety. Deacon Brown bad the misfol
tune to lose his wife, and at the age c
forty found himself with family of fou
small children, without a mistress to hi
farm house. AS he could not imme
diately take another wife and avoid ex
citing scandal, and could not get alon,
without some one to take charge of th
kitchen and nursery, he had recourse t
employing a young woman as house
maid. Nancy Stearns was a laughing
rompng beauty, who delighted in exper
imenting upon the Deacon by way o
testing the strength of human nature
For long time the deacon was invul
nerable; but at last, in a moment of un,
guarded weakness, he was led into temp
tation, and into committing "slight in
discretion" with his beautiful house maid
When in his wonted GOODNESS and pres
ence of mind, he was Mortified at the
enormity of his sin. In vain he repent
ed and grieved over lost virtue.
Finally, as last effort for easing his
conscience, at the conclusion Of the ser
vices on the following Sabbath morning,
he arose and requested the forbearance
Of the brethren and sisters few mo-
ments when he electrified them by max
ing the following confession:
My Christian friends, you all know
that lost my dear wife some months
ago, (sobs and tears,) and that Nancy
Stearns has been keeping house for me
and you know that have a little child
not a year old. Wen, that little one
would cry in the night, and it would be a
long tine before / could quiet it; and
last Tuesday night-God forgive me =
he child cried so hard that Nancy arose
md came into the room, and leaned over
he bed to hush the child-and, brothers
and sisters, her leaning over me made
me forget Christ ?"
Here the worthy Deacon broke down
and stood weeping, wailing and
blowing his nose.
What did you do? ? sternly demanded
he minister.
Ill kissed her ? stammered |
,ut the Deacon, between his sobs, 'but !
rave been very sorry about it, and pray
ID to be forgiven--aud l want you to
orglve me and pray for me, brothers
md sisters
AS the Deacon bowed himself upon
lis seat like the mighty oak before the !
ornado, Deacon Goodfellow arose and
stonished the audience still more, by
aging:
Brothers and sisters, you have heard
What brother Brown has said, and now
e wants our forgiveness. For my part,
think brother Brown is truly penitent,
nd am willing to forgive him with all
Ny heart And, brothers and sisters,
'ill add still farther, that, if l had no
fife, and if pretty girl like Nancy {
tearns should come to my room, and
IAN over my bed, and lean over me, I'd $
iss her, and abide the consequences
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

'Why is { the happiest Of the vowels p
The answer is: "Because ! is in the
midst of bliss; is in hell, and all the
others are in porgatory."
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

Sorrow for the dead has sacred eff.
eacy' There may be some truth in the
old superstition that no touch is so heal
ing as that Of dead mans hand.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

Which, asks an agricultural chap, is
the queen of the roses in the garden {?
and answers, the rose of the watering
pot, for it rains over all the others.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

The Usage (Kansas) Chronicle learns
that Usage mission has been sacked, and
four men carried of.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

DANeERoUs.-Tbe Portuguese Gov
ernment has built a gunbOatl 1t has one
punll II is called the Terror of the
Seas!l,
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

Will there nsrer be being to COM
bine a mans mind and woman's heart,
and who yet finds life too rich to weep
over? Never?
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1863-11-13

NATURAL1zED CITIzENs.-The fol-
lowing is believed to be a correct esti-
mate Of che number OF naturalized citi-
zens residing in the United States, with
the countries whence they have origina-
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1863-08-21

me, but then he thought it was 80 funny for
mo to catch hold Of his arm in the way
did. Mr.. Jones says it appears to him 50
funny that in any such difficulty with q
team, women must always try to seize the
lines, or do some other funny thing. aAh,
going well, it is funny, Mr.. De Quille, tha,
you can never stay to chat with me longer
than ten minutes at time, and you know
never get down street to hear the news
Though, for wonder, l did get down for
Eve minutes this afternoon-La, amt i,
funny to see so many stout, fine looking
young men in our streets with an arm or leg
off! But war times are funny times l dc
declare its often enough to make one cry
ones eyes out, for every day the .funnies,
things do happen. There was Mrs. Shaw,
went down to the cars last Monday to NEE,
her husband, who started home sick and
wrote that he would be there that day, and
when the train got in it brought his corpse
Well, good day,-Ain't it funny that the
rebels have got into Indianas
p. S. AT the end of every sentence Mrs
Jones introduces some eight or ten giggles--
he, he, no, he, he, he, he, he," intended,
presume, as notes Of admiration, and ends
with drawing in Of the breath, making .
sound between long. drawn sigh and yawn
As had no room in the body Of this pape,
for all these have placed them here-no,
being willing they should be lost
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1863-08-21

III man marry shrew, are we to sup.
pose he is shrewd |?
Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1863-08-21

PLEASING EVERYBODY Heaven help the
man who imagines he can dodge his enemies
by trying to please everybody! If such an
individual ever succeeded we should be glad
to know it. Not that we believe in a mans
going through the world trying to find beams
to knock his head against; disputing every
mans opinion; elbowing and crowding all
who differ from him. That again is another
extreme. Other people have right to their
own opinion--so have you; don't fall into
the error Of supposing they respect you more
for turning your coat every day to match the
colors of theirs Wear your own colors, spite
OF wind and weather storms or sunshine
It costs the vacillatng and irresolute ten
times the trouble to wind ard shuttle and
twist, that it does honest, manly independ-
ence to stand its ground. Take what time
you please to make up your mind; having
once made it up, stick to it like burr to .
chestnut