The free South. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1863-1864, 1863-08-15
BEAUFORT, S. c., SATURDAY, AUGUST 10, 1863
miscellaneous Items.

orally takes good many OF them 10 40 IL.
Why is sanguinary epistle Like Sur
geon ? It is letter Of blood.
Why is a flirting wife like wheel? ?
Because she goes round with the teAoes:
When is woman like dome When
she is fretted.
Where was Adam going when he was
in thirty-ninth year? Into his fortieth.
Never take nap in the. railroad car
riage Cause why =? the train always
runs over sleepers.
The girl who allures and deceives with
kiss is convicted of hypocrisy out OF her
own mohtif. ------------ '--=''
Though we travel the world over to find
the beautiful, we must carry it with us, or
we find it not.
When did Sir Isaac Newton cut up
shines When he divided the rays OF
light.
How many foreigners does it take to
corrupt ones manners ? 1t takes forty
Poles to make one Rood. 1
Why are horses in cold weather like
meddlesomc gossips Because they are
the bearers OF idle tails.
Vice is more revolving among the high
than among the low, as filth disgusts one
more in the parlor than in the stable.
What FIVE names IN the bible represent
a child going to get whipping? Adam,
Seth Eve, Cain Abel
Why cannot the Emperor Napoleon in
sure his life e? Because nobody can make
out bis policy. ."
Some women think that virtue was
given them as claws were given to cats
to do nothing but scratch with.
Military buttons are very attractive to
woman, especially if they are also bach
elor's buttons
"Katy, have you laid the table-eloth
and plates, yet?' can sure I hev, mem,
everything but the eggs, an isn't that
Biddys work, surely?
Mrs. Partiagton says she don't wonder
at it. that there is so much stealing IL
Congress, when they always Lay their bills
right on the table. aa.l
Some rich men keep cross dogs around
their houses, so that the hungry poor
who stop to "get bite may get it out
side of the door.
"Sam, why don't you talk to massa and
tell him to lay up treasures in heaven ?"
''What for? What de use ub layin' up
treasures dar, whar heneber see um agin ,"
As We grow Old. we should grow rev.
erent Nature keeps our heads covered
in our youth, but uncovers them In our
old age.
The sweetest music is not in the ora
torio, but in the human voice when it
| speaks from its instant life tones OF ten
derness, truth or courage.
Woman must remember that she brought
more sin and misery into the world by
her eating than ever man has by his
drinking. ~ aa: .,r.--i -.sai
The Boston Herald has been specially
favored in the draft Two editors, broth
ers, two clerks, four compositors, and
four pressmen have been drafted
A piece OF bread soaked in vinegar and
applied to corn on the foot, on going to
bed at NIGHT, and bound with piece of
oil cloth, will remove the corn in two or
three applications.
"That's a fine strain, +" said one gentle
man to another, alluding to the tones Of
q singer at concert the other evening.
"Yes," said a countryman who SGT near,
"but if he strains much more, he'll bust.
LovE-The sun of life: most beautiful
in morning and evening, but warmest and
steadiest at noon.
A keeper of saloon, advertising his
establishment, concludes thus: "Those
of my patrons who may desire it, can be
sent home on wheelbarrow gratis.
Is anybody waiting on you p said a
polite dry goods clerk to Il girl from the
country.
Yes, sir, said the blushing damsel,
+. that's my feller outside.