The Goodhue volunteer., 1863-01-21
MigrellNMents BeAdiMg.
THE WIFE TAMER; >
Or, How DR.. strahan was Foiied.

! =
Mrs. Morton was a widow-a young,
pretty rich widow-when Doctor Strahan
made her acquaintance. She was poor but
very handsome when Squire Morton
married her, and at his death, two years
after, became sole heir, put on her widows
weeds and pocketed her deceased husbands
gold at the same time.
Madam rumor said that poor old Nor
ton never enjoyed single hour after be
married her But how should Madam Ru-
NOR know? OF one thing; however, / Can
give my readers reliable information. Mrs.
N orton had not been widow twelve
months ere she received, with seeming
pleasure, very decided attentions from Dr..
Strahan.
| Do sou inquire who Dr.. St7ahan was I?
Well. he studied medicine, and had the
title Of N. D. conferred upon him, which
he took pleasure in attaching to his name
with great flourish. But it is asserted
that he never had halfa dozen patients in
as many years. He was of prepossessing
appearance, ready talker upon any sub.
,.ject, and was, in fact, tirst-rate company
lie wrote poetry and two column skctches
for the Weekly Leveler, and last. though
not least, he dressed in good taste and in
the height Of fashion how he cid it no
one knew, but then it was no ones busi-
ness.
But I must be allowed to correct one
rumor which has gained considerable prey
alence, to the effect that he supported
himself by his literary labors an ordinary
scrlbbler could hardly afford Strahan's
wardrobe.
Old Squire Morton had been dead but
LITTLE over year when DR.. Strahan,
despite all the gossippers could say, mar.
ried the widow and her fortune. The fact
was, he wanted rich wife-as 10 her, she
was anxious to leave her weeds and 20 irto
society again, and she could divine no
reader way to accomplish these purposes
than by marrying. When any one spoke
to the doctor about her being shrew, he
merely remarked that ho should take
p'easure in tanning a shrew.
For three months they lived happy TO-
gethcr, for it was in the height Of the
season, and between Cape May, Newport
> Saratoga and the White Mountains, the,
were alone with each other scarce three
hours out Of the twenty four; consequently
1t was Impossible for them to disagree. Bu
: the season was soon over and they returned
to their quiet home-the place O: all Others
to study wife or husband, There j:
no unnatural excitcment-no fashionable
Mrs. a. to outdrcss, no protligate Mr.. B
} TO outdo in squanderinS money ; no one te
$ See, to plelse but the 'o,her half
: After a season Of long continued ca;ety
there necessarily follows one Of cxlrem,
, du|lness and when one is dull one is casi,,
dspcased. Now Mr.. and rs. Strahar
were both remarkably dull, and, as matte,
OF course, both were greatly displcased
1t was their third day at home upon which
their first quarrel commenced. How it com
menced neither could clearly tell. It i
$ only known that Strahan expressed de
sire to dine on roast beef. Mrs. S. said sh,
abomina:ed beef and would have roast tur
e key and oyster sauce. He'd have beef o
Hothrs She'd have turkey, and thus com
E1neneed the war Of the Strahans. One o.
dered the butler not to have foul, the othe
gave strict injunctions not to have beef fwhil
% Airs. 5. visited hrr friends and partook c
e turkey. =. II. "".
After suprer DR.. S. gave wine supper i
the room which he dignified by the name {
n study, sort Of variety store in which h
d kept his library, writing desk and spi,toor
: Here also also were two glass cases, one {
g which contained skeleton hung on wire
in the other was an Egyptian mummy,
The walls were hung with curiossies
among them cane from a tree which srey
over Washing.on's grave. snuff box fro,
the wood Of Charter Oak, chip from Ii
United States friga,e Constitution, mineral
sE shells and fossils Q: all kinds specirne
r. ears OF corn, enormous sized fruits an
vegetables. cases of dried insects and pickle
reptiles. Stuffed birds were pe-ched abo,
the apartment and solup,uous French iiths
aad portraits of distinguished pc,
sonsges were hung promiseuously on ii.
= waI!s;a long reading table, arm chair
afpfescupt,on case, mammoth bell met
-. pessis and mortar completed the furnitu
.s- Iof the study. ss. s@ zs=sa~sr..
sh During the same evening Mrs. 8. had
Whist party in the parIor.
II " 'ne held her votaries ia bondage LONG
I.han cards. Mrs s. had dismissed b
for party and retired hours bebre her I,eee 10
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