Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1863-07-09
Taking up a Collection.
Rarely have we had better story,

better told story. than this, from
reverend gentleman in Missouri -
The life of preacher in q new coun-
try, from a regular point of view, IS
hardly as smooth and free from difficult
ty as a position in more cultivated and
populous communities seems to be-
The people are thinly scattered here
aud there, engaged by different pursuits
though chiefly agricultural. Being col
leeted from all parts of the older States
and gathered from every class of soci-
ETY., they meet upon the same common
ground upon terms of easy familiarity,
and restrained by no irksome conven-
tionalities. People in new country
generally have pretty hard time OF it.
They live sort of 'rough-and-tumble'
life, wearing out their best efforts in
struggle for existence. Under these
circumstances the material sometimes
absorbs the spiritual; and the people not
unfrequently get so far behind with
the preacher that they have to be pow
erfully stirred up from the pulpit.
On enc occasion we had visit from
the presiding elder of our district at one
of our quarterly meetings We had not
paid our preacher nary dine, as the
boys say, and we expected scoring
from the elder.
Well we were not disappointed. The
aldtr preached US a moving discourse
from the text 'otOe no man anything. At
the close of his sermon, he came at once
to the subject in hand
'Brethern,' said he, have you paid
Brother -anything this year =
Nothing at all, understand. 'Well
row, your preacher can't live on the air
and you must pay up-pay up that's the
idea. He needs twenty dollars and
must have it Steward we'll take up q
collection no'c.
Here some of the audience near the
door began to slide out
Don't ruDn excl aimed the elder
Steward lock that door and fetch me
the keyn he continued, coming down out
of the pulpit and taking his seat by the
stand table in front.
The Steward locked the door, and then
deposited the key on the table by the
side of the elder.
Now Steward said he, go round
with the hat. must have twenty-five
dollars out of .his crowd before one OF
you shall leave this house.
Here was FIX The congregation
were taken all aback The old folks
looked astonished, the young folks litter
ed. The Steward gravcly proceeded in
the discharge Of his official duties. The
hat was passed around, and at length
deposited on the elders table. The ell
der poured out the funds on the table,
and counted the amount
Three dollars and u half A slow
start brethern. Go round again, Stew
ard. We must pull up heap stronger
than that
Around went the Steward with his hat
again, and fuaIiy pulled up at the ell
der's stand.
Nine dollars and three quarters! Not
enough yet. Go round again Steward =
Around goes the Steward the third
time.
Twelve dollars and half! Mighty
slow, brethern Fraid your dinners will
set cold before you get home to eat
'em Go round again, Steward
BY this time the audience began to be
idgety. They evidently thought the
joke was getting to be serious. But the
elder was relentless. Again aud again
circulated the iudefatigablc hat, and
slowly. slowly. but surely the Pile on
the table swelled toward the Hequisite
amount.
'Twenty-four dollars and half! Only
lack half dollar. Go round again
Steward
Just then there was tap on the win
dow from the outside: hand was thrust
in holding a half dollar between the
thumb and finger. and a young fellow
outside exclaimed:
Hero parson, here's your money
Let my gal out o there! I'm tired of
waitin' for her,
1t was 'the last hair that broke the
camel's back; and the preacher conld ex-
CLAIM, in the language Of Ike Turtle,
This ere metin's done, bust up!