davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

An old lady, resident of Providence,
who had never ridden in the cars. was
persuaded, by tbe combined efforts of her
children, james and Mary. to accompany
them on an excursion, she persisting
that she knew something would happen.
She took her seat next the passage-Wsy
The train was late, as excursion trains are
usually, and in coming round curve the
Boston express train was on the same
track, both nearing each other rather fas-
ter than was pleasant. The momentum of
each train was nearly lost, and they only
came together with q chuck, which pitched
the old lady on her face in the passa ge-
way between the seats. She a.ose 10 her
hands and knees, and looking back, asked,
'Jeemes, do they allus stop like that p
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Where's my wife p inquired our friend
Mi, on returning home early one evening
and missing his better half.
She has gone to bed with the toothaehe'
was the reply of some member Of the
family.
Well said the indignant Nil, If she
had rather 20 to bed with the tooth ache
than to 60 to bed with me. let her 90!
And he forthwith settled himself 60 the
perusal of the latest war news.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

ANEcDoTE OF GENERAL JACKSONVILLE,
Thomas, of Maryland. told the following
anecdote of General jackson, in q speech
in the House Of Representatives one dsy:
During the Presidential tern am appIi-
cation was made for the removal of some
postmaster in one of the Northern Sta tss,
and it was urged upon the President with a
great deal of earnestness, first by letter
and then q special committee came here
and demonstrated with great Bitterness
against the continuance Of this violent poll.
teal opponent Of the President. To cap the
climax, as the committee supposed, of the
peetmaster's offences, and insure his reno
val they told the President that the obnox-
ious officer had called General jackson o
''d-grey headed DID,"
Did be ? said the General.
He did,
IF am not mistaken said jackson,
that man stormed Stony Point, under
Wayne, and arg man who did that has my
permission to be postmaster and to curse
me the balance of his lifep
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
a correspondent in the army of th,
Union now in Tennessee, writes

a correspondent in the army of the
Union now in Tennessee, writes
During the pursuit which followed the
battle of Shiloh the body of Gen.
Bragg was captured.
Being brought before General Buell., he
was questioned as to the incidents of the
battle.
Among other things, he said, Dem gun.
boats of yourn is mighty institutions. De
night srter de battle, when secess ware 10
your tents, s'posen dey would have a fne
time, de big guns on de boats 90 boom.
Den big shell would come up through de
woods, blazin' like lamp post, a.huntrn'
de secess, and saying, 'Whar is you p
tchdr IS you and wherever il would find q
bag crowd h would drop right down thar
and scatter them.'
The deep voice of the old negro 90 close
ly initiated the whirr of Q large she'll
that the assembled generals burst into q
hearty laugh.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Au Englishman who had heard of the
Yankees habit of Dragging, attempted co
cut the comb Of that propensity. He
saw some huge wateemeloDs on q market
wOman's stand, and walking up to her,
pointed to them and said:
What don't you raise bigger apples
than these 10 America p
The woman looked at him, and retort-
ed
Apples Anybody might know you
was an Englishman- Ghen's hucklsber-
riesH
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

LOOK ON TIE BRIGHT SIDE 1t is better
to tread the peth of life cheerfully, skip
ping lightly over all the obstacles in the
way, rather than sit down ard lament
your bard fate. The cheerful mans life
will spin out longer than that Of 70 man
who is continually sad and desPonding.-
If distress comes upon Us. detection and
despair will not sfford relief. The best
thing to do when evil comes upon Us is not
lameutatiOn, but action not to sit and suf-
fer, but to rise and make q vigorous effort
to seek a remedy,
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
UNDER THE ICE.
Under the ice the waters run;
Under the ice our snirits lie.

Under the ice the waters run;
Under the ice our spirits lie;
The genial glow of the summer sun
Shall loosen their fstters by-and-bye.
Moan and groan in thy prison cold,
River Of life-river oflOve;
The winter is growing worn and old,
The frost is leaving the melting mould.
And the sun shines bright above.
Under the ice, under the snow,
Our lives are bound in a crystal ring;
By-and bye with the south winds blow,
And the roses bloom on the banks Of spring,
Moan and groan in letters strong,
River of life-river of love;
The nights grow short, the days grow long,
Weaker and weaker the bonds of wrong,
And the sun shines brighter above.
Under the ice our souls are hid;
Under the ice our COED deeds grow;
Men but credit the wrong we did,
Never the motives that lay below.
Moan and groan in thy prison cold,
River Uf life-river Of love;
The winter OF life Is growing old,
The frost is leaving the melting mould,
And the sun shines warm above.
Under the ice we hide our wrong
Under the ice that has chilled us through;
Oh, that the friends who have known us long,
Dare to doubt we are good aid true
Moan and groan in thy prison cold,
River Of life-riyer Of love;
Winter is growing worn and old,
Roses stir in the melting mould;
We shall be known above.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

An cid lady meeting Cambridge man.
atked him how her nephew behaved him.
self. Truly said be, he's fine felloV.
and sticks close to Catherine Hail. fthe
name Of q college.) Wv
i vow, said she, 1 feared as much IA
was always hankeria after the gifls v hen
q boy
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
jolI.t slsa.i Rate. of A1-.-sl.1-a
JOB PafnTIuo

Job Printing ofevsr ydsseriptio , vi, ID. nsstrSf
1P'ditiOuslysxeeutedt to order opl fb.r.l,ern,
Ortnento OF blanks keptooHstshtIy On Ia
~ All orders for AdyertI,lny a, "a
os accompanied by cash, unless some per,or SnnSr
eoeeomes responsible for the same -
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

AN INTERPErATIoN.-'Bill, what's the
meanin' of ell that readin' on the red ribs
bon strung out of that feller's mouth p
said an Illinois volunteer to a comrade,
pointing to the motto t. Plxyi6ns UauHa
upon scroll in the beak Of the eagle, on
the flag of his company.
L don't know zactly, jake said the
companion in arms, but hearu the
school-master of our town say that it meant
he's one Of 'emP
Well, be amt nothing shorter, old
hose
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
The Earth I. Fun OF thy Riches.

BT WILLIAM c. BRYANT
Almighty, hear us, while We raise
Our hymn Of thankfulness and praise,
That thou has given the human race
60 bright, so fair a dwelling place.
That when this orb Of sea and land
Was moulded in Thy forming land,
1hy calm, benignant smile impressed
A beam Of Heaven upon Its breast.
Then lowered the hills, and broad and green
The Wales deep pathway sank between.
Then stretched the plain to where the sky
Stops and shuts in the exploring eye.
And stately groves beneath thy smile
Arose on continent and isle;
And fruits came forth and blossoms glowed,
And fountains gushed and rivers flowed.
Thy hand outspread the billOwy plains
OfOcean, nurse OF genial rains,
Hung high the glorious sun, and set
Nights eressets In her arch Ofjet.
Lord, teach us; while the unsated gaze,
Delighted, on thy works delays,
TO deem the forms Ofbeauty here
But shadows of brighter sphere.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

A soldier from ChsttOnooga gave q vert
fair idea Of the attrsctiveness Of that plaza
In the following manner: Several we're
speaking of the lack of aceommoda tion
there. when he remarked:
well, If were to be sent to hi. and
had I've days furlOugh to stop in Chatani>
ooga, I'D cay, Drive on the cartn
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

MIsERIEs IN LIFE.-Residing between a
stone-cutter's and an uDdertsker's.
Passing a narrow passage fresh paint
ed.
Dreaming that you have wings, and wa
king with fit Of the govt.
Eudeavoring to make violent love under
the table. and pressing tho wrong foot.
Hearing the bells ring for the N arraige
Of your rival.
Toastiog cheese, and when it is more
than half done, letting it fall into the ash
es.
Drying long letter. by holding it neg.
ligeotly behind your back to the fire, as
yOu converse with friend I; turning round
and beholding it in flames.
Forced by politeness to leave comfort
able party for the purpose Of accompany.
ing cross old maid to her lodgings, two
miles distant.
Wishing to awake early for She boat, =
looking at your watch, aud discovering
you neglected to wind 1t over Fight.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

CoNvERsATIoN.-Personalities are often
regarded as the zest, but mostly as the
bane of conversation. For experience
seemed to have ascertaiDed, or at least.
usage has determined, that personalities
are always spiced with more or lees of
malace. But surely you would not have
mixed conversation always settle into
discussion Of abstract topics. Commonly
speaking, you might as we'll feast your
guests with straw-chips, and sawdust.-
Often, too, it happens that in proportion
as the subject of conversation is more ab.
stract, its tone becomes harsher and dog.
NAUTICAL. And what are women to do p
They whose thoughts always cling to what
is personal, and seldom mount into the
cold, vacant air of speculation, until thew
have something more solid to climb round.
You must admit that there would be sad
dearth OF entertainment and interest and
life IN conversation without sometime of
anecdote and story. Doubtless. But this
is very different from personality. Con-
versatIon may have all that is valuable in
it, and all that is lively and pleasant, with
out anything that comes under the head of
personality. The house in which. above
all others have ever teen an inmate of.
the life and the spirit and the ioy of con
versation have been the most intense. il a
house in which hardly ever heard an evil
word uttered against any ONE uesses at
Truth.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Hans, who is judge Of morals as well
as money, ssys that being tender to anoth.
er mans wife is not illegal tender" We
accept bis opinion, though We have no in
terest in the question.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

>. MIKE can you account for the extraor&
binary curve in this horses backf'
Sure, an | can, sir. Before the ba,ta
was your property she was backed sein an
Irish horse, that bate her all hollow, aod'
she never got straight since
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

The sxperisOcs Of many life :-'Whst
. fool Pve been p
The experience Of many a wifss-'Whst
q fool I've eotP
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
An IrIshman's Mistake.

A Hibernian, with nose as red as
beet, and rendered still more red BY a co.
pious discharge of blood, which oozed
through dirty rag tied over a recent
wound on his scalp, applied at the Bos-
ton Police Court few days since for Q
warrant.
We'll, Pat,' for his countenance operat-
ed as sort of finger post, pointing to the
road whence he came J, what do you want?'
asked thejudge.
I'D be wanting warrant, phase yer
Honor
Against whom?'
'Agin Barney oLeary, phase yer Rever.
ence.'
For what?'
For murther, yer Grace
Whom did be murder?'
'Divil creature but myself, yer Hon
or
And has he murdered your
by my soul he has, bad luck to him
He cut hole in my head big enough to
bury his cat
He hasn't killed you outright, see.'
It's not his fault that he hasn't yer
Honor, for be intended it, and nothing sur
err
i suppose an assault warrant will suit
your purpose
Yer Honor knows what's best, and I'll
take what can GET
When did be assault you p
Last night that ever was yer Rever-
euce.'
Did he nit you with stick
Fore God be didn't, yer Honor wild q
poker
"A pOkerl That is dangerous wesp-
Oh
'Divil doubt ofit.'
where were your
Where was II - why in bed to be
sure.'
Asleep or awaken
AS sound as roach, yer Honor
And what provocatiOn had you given
him?'
'Divil provocation at all, yer Honor +;
barring Ls came to his own bed instead Of
mine
His own bed side-were you 10 his
bedY
Faith, you have just guessed it yer Hon.
or
And what brought you there? p
That's more than can tell, yer honor,
barring the liquor that was iu me-
And was this all you did to provoke his
angerr
'Divil thing
Was there any other person PRESENT.
Not creature, ipdepiniint of his wife. ,
His wifei p
OF coulse.'
of course aud don't you think you de.
served what you got?'
is it mel
Yes you
Sure it was all mistake, yer Honor. -
thought it was my own wife, and divil a
hear of her bead / touched
That may be; but you must be more
careful in future; and think under these
circumstances you must be content with
what you have got, for can't grant war.
rant.
Thank yer Honor; but when be hits me
again, it won't be for nothing
1t turned out that the fellow went drunk
to the bed. and was unconcious where he
was, till Barney gave him gentle hint
with the iron persuader, and fortunately
his skull was thick enough to resist the in
tended fnisher. Barney's wife, who was
awoke by the shock, lent her assistance 10
whacking him out of the room. She ex-
pressed her utter unconciousness of bis
presence, till her lawful lord arrived aud
discovered the intruder.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Let Us cherish good humored and chris
tan cheerfulness. Let us endeavor TO
shake of that sullenness which makes US
SO uneasy to ourselves and TO all who are
near US.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

We are acquainted with a monster 10
human form who says that the only time a
woman does not exaggersts is when she Is
talking Of her own age.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

An exchange paper in narratiug the cir
eumstaDces Of 9 recent suicide, said that
beside being deaf, dumb, and an old bach.
elor, the unfortunate man exhibited signs
Of insanity.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

A boy having complained to his father,
that Bill had thrown the Bible at him. and
burt him on the head, the father replied
Well, you are the only member 81 NV
family on whom the Bible ever made che
least Impression
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

An excitement declares itself outEsrdIy.
and subsidies; enthusissn declares itSeiy
iowardly and enduresi
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Mother, il strikes me you are very lazy
just now
How dare you say so; Why. don't you u
see, I'm making bread !" indignantly re-
turned the ls3y.
True. bat that's neither uOtg nor Issf
than loafa4.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

Mr. Nebit, of Northern Vermont, is not
distinguished for liberslity, either Of purse
or opinion. His ruling passion is fear Of
being cheated. The loss, whether real or
fancied, of q few cents, would give him
more pain than the destruction of our en-
tire navy. He one day bought large
cake of tallow at q country store at ten
cents per pound. 90 breaking it to pieces
at home it was found to contain a large
cavity. This he considered a terrible dis
closure Of cupidity and fraud. He drove
furiously back to the store entered in great
excitement, bearing the tallOw and ex-
claiming
Here, you rascal, you have cheated mel
Do you call that an honest cake Of tallow 2
It is hollow, and there amt near 90 much
10 it as there appeared to be. l want you
to make it right
Certainly. certainly replied the mer-
chant. I'll make it right. / didn't know
the cake was hollow. Let me see you
paid ten cents per pound. Now. Mr.. N,
ho,c much do you suppose that hole OOuld
speigkP
Mr.. N. returned home with the dishon-
est talloW, but was never quite satisfied
that he had not been cheated by buying
holes at ten cents per pound.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
SIOOre's Ballad sInrInr.

More, more than eny other modern
united the characteristics of the bards
OF old. He made his own poetry, comno..
ed his own music, and sang bis own laws
IN the presence Of the great and the fair
All the world is acquainted with his me.
try and many of bis melodies have become
popular; but his qualities as a singer
known to comparatively few, were perhaps
not less remarkable than his genius as
poet and musician. We had onee the
opportunity Of hearing him, and it was a
pleasure we never can forget. With mere
thread OF voice, just sufficient to ''fIl" an
ordinary drawing room, aud ACCOMPANYING
himself with few chords on the piano. he
chanted (rather than sapg) bis own ballads
with such exquisite grace and finish. such
sweetness, tenderness, and Ere, that he
produced effects on bis hearers uneaualIed
by the greatest professors of the vocal art.
Pasta, who once heard him, expressed her
delight with Italian fervor. Moore.modest
ty detained such high praise, saving that
what be did could not be called singing
mo, Mr.. Moore" said the lady, at is NOT
exactly singing, but it is something a great
cea! better" 1t was, in truth, the perfec.
ton of ballad singing; and its charm Law 10
its delicacy, simplicity, and that earnest.
ness OF utterance and manner which show
ed that every word, every note, came from
the heart. Why do not our fashionable
and popular ballad-singers endeayor to
charm IN q similar mat n er Instead of load
ing simple melodies with unmeauiue fIour
lshes miscalled ornaments f-Blacktcood.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

All work warranted to g.,o entire satisfaction, and
seive prompt attention. (n2ly)
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

eight Exchange Sold at the lowest
CURRENT RATES AT
HANTs AND DRovERs BANK
AGLGSaas Building,
Banking Hours, Q to IL, and to 4.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

DartOn Smith, Police Magistrate and jus e
ID ofthe Peace, office on Sluf Str fl NercbantsRo~.
En LAk9 PleGsuIelH W"iti.s all who may entrust
N'h. On tie west Side Ofthe River, Joliet.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26

III ~. PlNNEY, Attorney at Law. Office In Bush's
IDs Block opposite National Hotel, Joliet Illinois
farncnlar attention given TO the procuring of PEN
. IONS BACK Pay, Bounty Money and all claims.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
DE IT'S r IL Y .

DRs. ALLEN L SALTER, permanently
H1Esb located in Joliet, is prepared to perform
OYFt all operations in the profession, IN the
L1b latest and most approved style Arti-
6a siugIe Tooth 10 full SettJ inserted on
uI.I ktmOapiEcTic principle.
Teeek Extracted without pain.
OFFICE on jefferson st., in Hawleys New Building
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-05-26
BUsINE SIS CARDS.

NR HENRY FOLKE, having permanently located
~ IN Joliet for the purpose Of practicing Medicine
would respectfully tender his professional services TO
epublic. ONCE 10 HaWley's Block, and residence on
Joliet St, fswdoors north Of the Joliet Bank.
Jan. Is, 1868. II
Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1863-08-07
Our Armp GOrrrsponornrt.
FROM THE NINTH VERMONT.
HEADQUARTERS 9rH VERMONT Vols, !
NnrLtnun Nn Inlv q


Yorktown, Va, July 2.
MB. EDITOR 81 send you a copy of the
Yorktown Cavalier containing account of a
little march we made the other day. We do
not believe many regiments march thirty
miles in fourteen hours with the thermometer
at 90 degrees.
The regiment is in good health. We have
Fifteen officers on detached service. You see
Gen. Wistar makes pets of us by making us
do all the Work We took that mail,
EXPEDITION TO GIoucHsrBB CouRr HousE.-Early
Commodore Jones, Capt Mitchell, left yorktown, with
the OH Vermont Regiment, Col Il. II. Ripley, com
mandiDg on board. The steamer reached Cappahosack
about daylight and the troops disembaTked and mme
diately pushed for Gloucester Court House except
four companies under Lieut. Col Barney, who proceeded
down the shore to Gloucester Point Meantime squad.
Of the "a Massachusetts, Cavalry At Gloucester Point
commanded by Capt Reed, advanced 70 Gloucester
Court House and effected junction with Col Ripley
This movement supported by the llSth New York
Volunteers, under Lieut. Col. Reese, and section Of
Capt Ftoh's 18th n. " Battery.
No enemy But II was learned that some
forty rebel cavalry had le Gloucester Court House the
evening before About dozen horses two wagons and
quantity Of arms seized. But the fortunate
haul the capture Of rebel mail carrier with his
mail. containing large number Of late papers and let
tiers which not unlikely to convey valuable informa
ton.
The troops comprising the expedition all returned to
their respective camps about retreat the same day
We are informed that this occasion the 9th Yer
Volunteers performed march Of thirty miles in
IA hours, without man dropping from the ranks
Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1863-08-07
MISCELLANEOUS DISPATCHES.
CINCINNATI, July %.

CINCINNATI, July 80.
The following information was received al
headquarters last night:
Col. Pegram with between | 500 and o.
900 men crossed the Cumberland river day
or two since and moved north toward Rich
mond. He was in the vicinity of that place
at the last accounts. The prevailing opinion
here in military circles is that when Pegram
started he was not aware of the capture of
Morgan, and contemplated assisting him to
escape. The disposition of our forces in
Kentucky is such that it will be impossible
for him TO either advance much further or 20
escape
Special dispatches from Columbus say that
the question whether Capt. Burbridge had
authority to accept the surrender OF John
Morgan will be speedily determined. He was
not a regular elected militia Captain, nor had
he any command at the time of Morgan's sur
render. Capt. Burbrdge, with few COM
panies, was acting as guide for Morgan,
when the latter, discovering our forces clos
ing in upon him, surrendered to him in or
der that he might secure terms of surrender.
Morgan will, doubtless, be sent back to Co.
lumbus and lodged in the penitentiary.
CINCINNATI, July 30-A. NJ.
lestetual morning ItBIhm ana scout 3
forces, numbering $500 crossed the Kentucky
river and marched to Paris. where they ar
rived yesterday afternoon and attacked our
forces.
After several engagement of two hours
the rebels were repused and driven away. II
is thought they will make flank movement
on that place. A large federal cavalry force
is in the rear OF the rebels.
The movement Of the rebels is believed tt
be against Paris for the purpose of destroy
ing the bridge there.
July, 80, r. M-Pegrams forces have re
treated to Winchester, allowed by our cayal
ny. number of prisoners have been cap
tured.
Squads Of Morgans men are being brough
into Columbus by the citizens and military
There are now 800 at Camp Chase Nor
gan was TO be removed to Columbus thi
morning, and will be confined in the peni,sn
! tiary.