The Ohio Democrat. [volume] (Canal Dover, Ohio) 1840-1900, 1863-11-13

ORIGINAL AND SELECTED, BY GRANVILLE NJ
PEPPER.
NEVER speak i'll of the dead or absent
If the counsel be good, no matter who gave it
AVOID political discussions, if you can atall
ONE ounce of discretion is worth pound OF
wit. ... .....
WIrnour the ladies' we should be STAG
nation.
However, poor the tree, good fruit can bO
grated on it. '...-..
REFLECT calmly, resolve prudent'y' and
perform promptly.
THE tears of affection are the dew. drops
from the blue sky of the SOUL
ALWAYS heed baby's cries They are the
poor little fellows only signals of distress
ALL the girls with pretty feet and ankles, are
in favor of the new fashion Of short dresses.
IT IS the ordinary way of the world to keep
folly at the helm, and vat under the matches.
The man who marries frivolous firt "gives
to airy nothing local habitation and name" "
Iris pity that gone of our newspaper poets
were not born hens, then their lays would be
valued by the dozen.
In conversing, give all leave to speak in turn.
Some people talk so much that one can't get
syllable in edgeways.
A MAN down east is so stingy that he holds
q. I'll laJa hio mi trn
so that it will take less cloth.
ARTEMUs WARD says there is no daily paper
in Baldinsville, but there is ladies sewing
circle, which answers the same purpose
A DUTcHMAN was heard soliloquising thus:
''She lofes Shon Nickel so better as |, because
he has koople Of tollars more as has"
WHY does dog wag his tail?-Because the
dog is stronger than the tail; if he wasn't the
tail would wag the dog Don'tyou see
Why is q lady pulling on her corsets like q
man who drinks to drown his grief? Because
in SO LAoING herself she is getting TIGHT.
THERE is q class of people who ask you
why you ''dont call to see them, but never
say "do." There are such in this section.
A FRENCH wit said of man that was ex-
ceedingly fat, that nature only made him to
show how far the human skin would stretch
without breaking.
IP man cannot be Christian unless he is
fighting man, then the surest way to get to
heaven is to kill somebody. Political preach
ers will please take notice.
The most recent case of absence of mind il
that Of an editor who lately copied from hos.
tile paper one Of his own articles, and headed
it, ga Wretched Attempt at Wit"
BRoUaH says he wishes he could break him.
self of the habit of lying in bed SO much. We
think it would be good idea If he would first
break himself of LYING out of bed.
The man who imagined himself wise be-
cause he detected q typographical error in a
newspaper has since been endeavoring to OBJ
tain perpendicular view Of rainbow.
X INA country grave yard thereis plain stone
erected over the grave of beautiful young
lady, with only this ription-"Julia Ad-
ANS, died of thin shoes, April II, 1885,"
A YOUNG lady was rebuked by her mother
for kissing her intended, and she justified the
act by quoting the passage Whatsoever ye
would that men should do unto you, do you
even so unto them" .-..H,
Wvu " yU over until next summer, the
citement of the Presidential election ~
III palsy the effort. Let us attend u !
now, and to that end send 10 your q q
descriptions BY letter. either addressed Il :
A PoET sent a poem to q newspaper, in which
occurred the following line: ..... ..
"a fragrant rose found near the pendantcOrn.'
The typo, who was undoubtedly ''set up
set It up as follows; ,.i.H
"Avagrant's nose sounds like apedlar's horn >
A LHARNED young lady of this place, desi-
ring to pass her opinion on Bulwer's "StrangG
Story" exclaimed; "0h, it's nothing but 0
conglomerated mass Of remarkable multitude
nous circumstances, superinduced by unpar'
nlelled Incidents" Her hearers were startled
Z A GERMAN was requested to write an epi
taph on fdwins, which he did up ''brown," al
follows: ,eBqtotiV Ge5g iii a. .trjl
"Here lies dwo dWins, as ted as nits-
Got kilt tenn NIT ter ager fits; u. d.
itii7 He dinks toy pcs doc goot for me- Nv
gwa He dakes tem home to lifsmit he."