davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04
A lawyers Career

Mr.. TRIPToLENUs TNsHNGLE was a young
man Of independent fortune who entered up
on the practice Of law as a kind of elegant
recreation. His Office was furnished with all
the necessary paraphernalia for prosecuting
his business, including a gigantic volume
bound in Russia, aud labeled in gilt letters on
the back side-Court Docket. Tinshingles ca
reer as an attorney will be understood by the
following entry from the first page Of his
docket
CIRCUIT COURT OF - COUNTY,
William. Ps. Spike As.onp.it Ds,ad. $500.
Thomas Hooker. -- --.... .t.
June l. Filed Narr ,.,
June 10. Dgot filed Dsmmrsr.
June 10. Leave to amend Narr, Den'r sus-
tanned.
June 20. Amended Narr, fled. ...-
June 80. Deft filed Plea.
Sept g. Filed Republication.
Sept. Is. DeGt filed Rejoinder. .-
Sept 26. Filed Sur-rejoinder.
Sept %. Dert fled Rebutter,
Oct. 8. Filed Sur-rebutter.
Oct. 10. DeftDemurs ? confound himl
P. S.-Tve lost sight of the damned case
and given up the business.
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

The annual election of officers Of the Grand s
Lodge of I. 0. o. F. of Ohio, for l863-64. has
resulted as follows: NJ W. Grand Master,
John ". Carter, Cincinnati; R. ". Deputy
Grand Master, Belden Seymour, Cleveland
R. W. Grand Warden, Matthew Newkirk,
Newark; R, w Grand Secretary, W. c. Earl,
Toledo; R. W Grand Treasurer, Ben. NJ.
Ayers, Dayton; R W. Grand Representative
John H. Wheeler, Columbus. - -.f
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

" Ny dear madam, can you give me, glass
of grog?' asked fadgued traveller in Ar.
kansas, as he entered cabin on the roadside.
." I amt got a drop, stranger, replied the
woman Hf.~ as--- .''- -L '@h -
But gentleman told me you had bar
rel" .. ..s,.r, s.rgEI
why good gracious" replied the womaH,y
q what do you reckon one barrel of whisky
is to me and my children, when we are out,
Of milk?"
The traveller sloped.
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

THE TmEE SrUrTERERs- gentleman az
fieted with an impedimeht in his speech, sat
down to a crowded dinner table, at a public
hotel and calling to servant, addressed him
.hus:--" W-w-waiters g-g-giye nine s-s-s
some r-rOast b-beet He stammeFsd ont in
reply. " W-w-we a-a-ain't g=g-got a1a-any,9'I
At which the gentleman, highly enraged, spP=;
posing the servant was mooking him, spFang
from his seat, and was proceeding to knock
him down, when the third person arrested his
arms, and cried out to him not to strike, say
ing. % He s-s-stutters SESAME a-as wlWe
dido" Gs ~ L-4 5Tla
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

AFUNNY scene occurred in Salem, Ohio,
the other day A phrenologist was 'ex-
hibiting his powers in that pleasant lit
tie town, and, after his public perform
ance was though, and the audience were
about to 90 home, very pompous and
portly member Of the Republican party
insisted vociferously upon having his head
felt. The operator at last consented, and
took the negro-worsLiper by the scalp
lock on his bald Uranium, and began mani
pulating him F." Colonel, " said he, you
have fat herd.;" after further lingering,
" fine fat head !; alittle more lingering,
''it's the fattest head I ever saw" a long
hesitation and considerable drumming
Of the shining pate, "I'H be id if I
don't believe it's all fat. Clere5and
Plain Dealer.
O.
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

JoAK on JIM LANE-When Jim Lane vas
in this city, some weeks ago, on his way to
Washington, he stepped into one Of the mill
tary headquarters, desiring to see the com
handing officer. In an ante-room he laid his
.oyeroOat and mufler on chair, and, casting
an inquiring and anxious glance st,an Order
ly, said: ~ -r- -s.f
They will be safe here I IsupposeP ~
" Yes replied the Orderly, there are no
Kansas troops in town, General"
The Kansas Senator smiled audibly, enjoy
ed the Jest, and "went in, satisfied Of the
safety of his thfngs1SG Louis Republican,
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

OE of the best of the stories about Ne
Clellan is the following, in RusselPs Diary.
" Mcclellan is, however, considered very
steady and respectable professional soldier.
A friend Of his told me to-day, that one Of
the most serious complaints the Illinois Gem
trail Railroad had against Mcclellan was tbatg
during the Italian wal; seemed to forget
their business; and that he was busted with
maps stretched out on the floor, whereupon
he, superintendent, Penned out the points of
battle and strategy, when he ought,tOo have
been attending to passenger trains and traffic.
That which was fiat blasphemy in Failway7I
Office may be amazingly approyedip the feld,'s
Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1863-03-04

5moe s7Ed g..t0T sa iaas 'F t' @9.i
tHaiL1y nod; E7ia oj 6rrQI g-zEa'ls
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

GoUeH's APosrRoPHB TO WATER
Look at that, ye thirsty ones of earth! Be-
hold it! See its purity! How it glisteus. as
though a mass Of liquid gems! 1t is b4v-
erege brewed BY the hands of the AL
mighty Himself! Not in a sim mering still.
over smoky fires, choked with poisonous
gases. and surrounded by the stencil OF
sickening odors and rank corruptious, does
our Father in Heaven prepare the precious
essence of life. the pure cold water! But
in the green glade and CLASSY dell, where
the red deer wsnders and the child loves
to play-there God brews it. And down,
down in the deepest valleys, where the
fountains murmur and the rill sings; and
high up in the mountain tops, where the
naked granite glitters like gold in the sun,
where the storm clouds brood and the
thunder storms clash-and far away out ou
the wide sea, where the hurricanes howl
nusIc and the waves roar the chorus,
swsepiuo the march of God-thers he
brews il. that beverage of flife-health-giV-
inc water. And everywhere it is thing
Of Notwithstanding in the dewdrop, sing
inc in the summer rain, shining in the ice
Ss1, till the trees all seemed turned into
living Jewels; spreading a golden veil over
the settipg sun, Of the white gauze over the
midnight moon, sporting in the cataracis.
sleeping in the bright snow curtains, softly
about the wintry world and weaving the
many. colored iris, that seraph's zone o.
the sky, whose warp is the raindroP oi
earth, whose wocf is the sunbeam OF heaV-
en-, all checkered over with celestlal mowers
by the mystic hand OF refractlon. Still al
ways. it is beautiful, that blessed re wafer
No noisou bubbles on the brink, its form
brines no sadness or murder; no blood
stains it's limpid glasses. brok hearted
viyes. male widows and starving orphans
,bed no tears in its depths. No drunkard''
sbriekiug ghost from the grave curses 1t II
words Of eternal despair. Beautiful, pure
blessed and glorious. give me forever th'
Hnarklino cold water.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

OUT SIN AMONG You, LET HrM FIRST CAST 4
STONE AT HER!' We all have our errors, and
all need forgiveness.
After saying much more of similar put
port, urged her, if she did not write to her
parents herself, to give me their address, and
let me ascertain, in my own way, they
still lived and. cared for her. She finally
consented, and wrote the address on q slip
of paper. Tread it, spraug from my seat,
and looked at her 10 perfect amazement. l
understood il all, bat could scarcely credit
my senses.
She acns my sisters child!
l passed over the scene that followed
this strange discovery.
It was all mistake on her part-her let
ter had never reached her almost distracted
parents. who had long mourned her as dead,
or lost to them forever. She went home
with nae. and remained at my house till her
fond aud loving parents came to reclaim
her. It was fearful scene Of commingled
Joy and gEiAf when we all met under the
same roof; aud humbly on our knees, we
ali thanked God for the wonderful restora
ton of the lost one, who was pluck ed indeed
as q brand from the burning, and saved in
botly, and, / trust, in soul.
Three years after, Ralph Wagner died in
prison, and with him perished one portion of
the guilty secret. I have purposeiy con-
oeaied all other names-but my sad story is
none the less true Notwithstanding.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
Amns}ng Annecdote.

Daniel Webster had an apecdote of old
Father Searl, the minister Of his boyhood,
which is too good to be lost. 1t was cns-,
tomary then to wear buckskins breeches in
cool weather. One Sunday morning in
autumn, Father Searle brought his breeche1
down from the garret, but the wasps had
taken possession during the summer, and
were having a nice time in them. By
dint of effort he got out the iDtruders and
dressed for meeting, but while reading the
scriptures to the congregation be felt dag
ger from one of the euraged small-waisted
fellows, and jumping around the pnlpit slap
ping his thighs. But the lore he Slapped
and danced, the more they stung. The
people thought him crazy, but he ex-
planned the matter by saying: "Brethren
don'Hbe alarmed-the word of the Lord is in
my mouth, but the devil is in my breeches!'
Webster always told it with great glee to
the m inisters.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
Precious PIety.

A Michigan lawyer, who writes very
bad hand, sends as the following. Several
years ago was practising law In many
beautiful towns In Wisconsin,. One very
warm day, while seated in my office ct
work. was interrupted BY the entrance OF
a boy the son of one of my clients. who
had walked into town, six miles. in bla-
zing sun. for the purpose Of procuring q
Bible. He had been told, he said, that
there was place where they gave them
away to people who had no money, and
was very anxious to get one of the books.
and asked me- to go with him to the place
where they were kept. Anxious to en-
courage him in his early piety, I left the
brief on which l was and went with him
over to the stand of Presbyterian deacon,
who had the much coveted books in charge.
1 introduced him to the deacon, telling
him the circumstances He praised the
boy very highly; was delighted to see a
young man so early seeking after the
truth. ETC., and presented him with the
best bound Bible in his collection. The
boy put the book in his pocket. and was
starting of, when the deacon says:
"Now; my son. that you possess what
you desired. l suppose that you feel per-
fectly happy?"
Well do. old hoss. for. between you
and /, know where can trade it for a
plaguey good fiddle" ...-..4
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
NUMBER a.

sKHERETaE BIRTH DAYs.-A Western exc
change makes the following excellent sue@
gestions which must meet the appreciation
Of youthful readers. We trust they will
slso BE- resolved withfavor by the'old foikss
Il says; .--.',e. s-f-1
Keep the birth days religiously. they
belo6g exclusively To-, and are treasured
among the sweetest memories of home.
Do not let anythius prevent some toksu.bS
it ever 80 small, thai it be rem embered.
Birth days are great events TO children,
For one day they are heroes. The special
pudding or cake is made for them; new
Jacket or trowsers, with pockets, or the
first pair of boots are donned; aid big broth
ers and sisters sink into insigni6cance beside
little Charlie who is Elk to day, and is go,
ing to be o man. Mothers who have half
dozen little ones TO care for, are apt to
neglect birth days; they come to Often
sometimes when they are 'nervous'-but if
they Only knew how much such souvenirs
are sherished by their pet Susy or Harry,
years afterward, when away from the
hearthstons and they have none to remind
them that they have added one more year
to the perhaps weary round of life, or to-
wish them, in old. fashioned phrase, many
happy returns to their birth day. they
would never permit any cause to step be-
tween them and mothers privilege"
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
iuasOnce YonnS.

. 1t is an excellent thing, for all who are
engaged in giving instructions to young
people, frequently to call to mind what
they were themselves. when young. This
Practice is one which is most likely to i'm
part patience and forbearance. and to cor
rect unreasonable expectations At one
period in my life, when instructing two or
three young people to write, found them
as I thought, unusually stupid. hap,
pened, about this time, to look over tie
contents of an old copy book, written by
me when I was a boy. The thick up.
strokes, the crooked down strokes, the
awkward jointing of letters. and the blots
made in the book m ade me completely
ashamed of m yself, and I could at the m o.
ment, have hurled the book into the fire.
The worse, however, 1 thought of myself,
the better I thought of backward scholars.
l was cured of my unreasonable expecta-
tions, and became in future doubly patient
and forbearing. In teaching youth, re-
member that you once were young, and ia
reproving youthful errors, endeavor to call
to mind your own.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

DREAMING IN CHURcH.-At Ballston Spa
on Sunday afternoon, fatigued with hislong.
journey, wagner. with his son John, drove
his team into barn, and determined tc pass
the Sabbath in enjoying season of worship
with the good people Of the village. When
the time for worship arrived John was.sent
to watch the team while the wagner went
in with the crowd. The preacher bad
hardly announced his subject before the old
man fell sound asleep. He sat against the
partition in the center of the body slip; just
over against him. separated by a very low
partition, sat fleshy lady who seemed all
absorbed in the sermon. She struggled
hard with her feelings. but unable to control
them any longer, she burst out with loud
scream, and SD outed at the top of her voice,
srousing the old man, who, but half awake
threw his arm around her wrist, and cried ,
very soothingIy: "Whoa. Nancy! Whoa
Nancy! Here, john" calling his son, "cut
the belly-band and loosen the breechen
quick. or she'll tear every thing to piecesl"
Albany Times.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

a tragic tale is told by the Hartford Press.
of a married man who used to live in that
CITY, but whose business has lately kept
him a good deal from home. During his
absence. his wife, with his consent, sold
bis residence, but somehow he forgot it,
aud returned to the old home late at night.
not long ago. went with perfect freedom
and CROPPED his way to his wife's bedroom
He was leislursly proceeding TO disrooe
him self, when rustling in the bedciothes
from which appeared two feminine heads.
out of which soon issued some uoiamiiisr
bn. npDleasantiy vigorous screams. brought
him to q consideration Of his status. Apoi-
ogies under those circumstances were o'
lietIe avail, and with the whole female
household in terrible pitch OF excitsmeuI
the unfortunate intruder retreated. de
ss;d Il was mistake.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
Riches

"Oh! if 1 ad the power-if we're rich l
would be so charitable!"-is phrase, if not
exactly expressed is very often implied.
in the conversation of we'll meaning peo-
pie; and undoubtedly, wealth is possess
ion foI the use of which we are accounta-
BILE in exact proportion to the extended
range Of action it affords. Still few indi-
viduals are so happily placed as not to have
ir some degre the power of bene6ting their
fellow creatures and a long list Of insignif-
icsnt items will make up large sum, it is
astonishing how large an amount of happi-
nesss arises from the small character and
trifling kindness of life. The sphere may
be limited; but to those who really take
pleasure in doing good turn" to fellow
creature, the opportunities are innumera-
BILE; aud despite the dark colors in which
some writers love to print human nature
we believe the proportion who do take
such pleasure to be large one.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
AMnfher,s Grave.

Earth has some sacred spots where we
feel like loosening the shoes from our ieet
and treadirg with holy reverence; where
CANNON words of pleasure are uniting
places where friendships hands have lin
eered ia each other; where vows have We +. been
Sighted. PRAYERS offered and tears OF part
Ing shed. Oh. how the thoughts however
arourd such places. and travel back through
immesfarabls space to visit them. But OF
all The spots on the green earth, none ne Is ;o SO
eacred as that where rests. wasting the IN
.nrrsction. those we loved and cherished
Hence, in all ages. the better portion OF OF
mankind have chosen the loved spots they
have loved to wander at eventide and
vsep alone But among the charnel nou-
.aa of the dead if their is one spot more sa :
Grad than the rest. 1t is mothers grave
there sleeps the mother of our infancy
she whose heart was stranger o,S 10 evsi sI
wavs end excuses for US when we couid
81 nons for ourselves. There she sleeps
sod we love the very earth for her sake.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
Cauteens

The word "conteen" has had a curious
history. It is perhaps the only word in our
language, which. originally English,
passed into foreign tongue, and was alter r
wards taken back in modified form As
originally spoken by the Saxon, it was
simply tin can, but the Gaul, as ls his wont
placing the noun before the adjective ana
the letter as 9, brought out as ca" s'n' pro,
nounced canteen. Adopting a thousand
other French military terms, the dull Eng
lishman took back his own original word
in a new shape, without any inquiries on
the subject and hence we now say oanteen
instead of tin can.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
DemOcracV.

Inasmuch as reference has of late been
made to Hon. WM. Aliens deiHition of
Democracy, and as the quotation in many
instances has been made inaccurately. we
present below the passage entire. 1t occurs
in a speech he made at the great Demo-
cratic Festival held in Lancaster, Ohio, on
the 19lh. day of August 1887. It is the
most correct definition of Democracy we
have ever seen.
Democracy is sentiment not to be ap-
palled, corrupted or compromised. 1t
knows no baseness; it covers to no danger.
it oppresses no weakness. Fearless, gener-
Gus and humane, It rsbukes the arrogant,
CD erishes honor and sympathiZes with rhe
humble. 1t asks nothing but whatit con-
cedes; it comedies nothing but what it de-
mands. Destructive only of despotism, it
is the sole conservative of liberty labor and
property. IL is the sentiment of freedom ,
of equal rights, of equal obligations. 1t is
the law of nature pervading the law of the
land. The upid, the selfish, and the base
in spirit may denouuce it as vulgar thing
bot in the history of our race, the Demo-
cratic principle has developed and illustra'
ted the highest moral and intellectual at
tributes of our nature. Yes-that is noble,
maenanimous a sublime sentiment which
expands our affections, enlarges the circle oil
our sympa:hies snd elev ates the soul oi
man, until claiming an equality with the
best. he rejects as unworthy of his dignity
any political ihnmunities over tho humblesl
of his fellows. Yes-it is an ennobliDg
priuciple-and may that spirit which ami
mated our fathers. in the Revolutionary
contest for its establishment. continue to
animate us. their sons. in the impending
struggle for its preservation"
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

A. darkey down South had obtained q
license of the Baptists to preach. He was
holding forth in the presence of many of
his colored brethren at one time, when he
undertook to describe the process of Adams
creation. Said he:
when God made Adam, He stopped
down, scraped up little dirt, wet it little.
warm in the hands, and squeeze it in the
right shape. and den lean it against the
fence to dry"
"--op, dere," said our Universalist darkey
"You say dat are de fust man eber m ade?'
"Sartin )" said the preacher.
"Den," said the other, lies tell fellel
whar dat ere fence come from?'
"Hush!.' said the preacher, 1.-TWO more
questions like dat wou Id spile all tsology
in the world!"
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

There is pretty Persian apologize on
the difference between mental and corpo-
real suffering. A king and his minister
were discussing the subject, and differed in
opinion. The minister said the first to be
most severe, and to convince his sovereign
of it, he took lamb, broke its leg, shut it
up with a tiger, which was bound by
chain. so that the beast could spring near
but not seize the lamb, and put food also
before him. The lamb with the broken
leg had eaten up all the food placed before
him; the other was found dead from fright.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
For the Bulletin.
Moments of Life.

There are moments when the sunlight,
Gilds the hopes that sleep within,
Fitting emrlems of our childhood,
When the heart seemed free from sin;
AS we pondered DER the future
With a calm and trusting smile,
Fancying future scenes of beauty,
Full of life and free from guile.
There are moments when discouraged
By those cares which often come,
Taking all the roses gathered
In journey just begun;
When the spirit steepd in sadness
Feels how weak and tasteless all,
Are the charms which tempt the vision,
Charms which beckon to enthrall.
But be it cloud, or sunshine
Precious moments will they pr rove,
However dark the field of action
If its banner bear true love;
And while hoping, living. acting,
Strive to prize them as they fly
Ever holding up before US,
That a moment comes 10 diel
Nov. 4th, 1868. R. H. l..
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12

FEMALE DRUMMER.-A girl, aged twelve
years, giving the name of Chas. Martin, en-
listed 10 Pennsy lvania regiment, nearly
two years since, as drummer boy. She
had the advantage of education, could
write good hand. and compose very well.
She made herself useful to officers of the
regiment in tho capacity of a clerk: was
in five battles, but escaped unwounded !.
The officers never dreamed of her sex. A
short time since she was taken sick of ty-
phoid fever, disease quite prevalent in
Philadelphis, and was removed to the
Pennsylvania hospital. A day or two
since the matron of the Institution discov-
cred the drummer boy to be no more OF
less than girl. Her parents who reside
10 Bucks county, have been advised OF the
facts by letter.-Phil. Press.
The dollar weekly bulletin. [volume] (Maysville, Ky.) 1862-1864, 1863-11-12
How BAToHELoRs WERE TREATED By THE

How BATCHELoRs WERE TREATED By THE
ANo1EKTs In antiquity, it was considered
uppatriotic in Q citizen to remain bach
elor all his days. By the Spartan laws,
those citizens who remained bachelors
after middle. age, were excluded from all
offices, civil and military. At certain fessts
there were exposed to public dsrsion, and
led around the market place. Although
generally speaking, age was usually deeply
respected a. Sparta; yet this wh feeling Ih,S was
make way for you" said a Spartan youth
to a gray headed old bachelor. "who will
never have a sou TO do me the same honor
| when am DID," The Roman law pur-
SUED the same policy toward bachelors
They have to pay extra and special taxes
and under Augustus law was enacted, by
which bachelors were made incapable o
acquiring legacies and devises of real estat'
by will, eqcept from their relations. Il
canon law bachelors are joined to marry
or to profess chastity in earnest by becom
| ing monks.