Ellsworth American., 1863-06-26
4 Chapter of Conundrums.

| TIE nose, ana the otner knows the stops.
Why is flirting wife like wheel p
Because she goes round with the telloes
as well as with the hab.
What is the difference between your
great coat and a baby? One you wear
and the other you was.
What was Eve made fol ? It has been
generally supposed that she was made for
Adam, but they say now that she was
made for Adams Express Company.
Why are all men soldiers by nature +?
Because they are all Sons Of mas (Mars.)
Why is drunkard hcsitating to sign
the pledge, like skeptical Hindoo? Be.
cause he is in doubt whether to give up
the worship of Jug-or-not.
Never tske nap in the railroad car.
riage. Cause whyl the train always
runs over sleepers.
When is woman like dome? When
she is fre.ted
What is the difference betYeen the In
strument that plays the bass ard the man
who sings it badly One is base-viul
and the other is vile bass.
When is clock guilty of misde.
meanor? When it strikes one.
When is window like star? When
it is skylight.
Why is wheat like the Camelia Japo.
Mica Both are priced because of their
flower (aour).
What proves good soldiers to be yery
careless They are in mess every day.
Where are ball and routs supplied grs.
It's? On the field Of hate.
OF whit profession is an Armstrong
sz9u? 4 brecehes maker.
What writer would have been the best
angler? The judicious Hooker.
Why should man named Ben marry
girl named Annie? Because he would
be Benefited and she Annie. mated.
What is the difference between the
Prince of Wales, a man with bald head,
an orphan, and gorilla The Prince Of
Wales is an keir appersnt, man with .
bald head has no hajr apparent. an or.
phan has esT parent, and a gorilla is
IN airy parent.
What flower most resembles bulls
mouth? a cowslip.
When did Sir Isaac Newton cut up
shines !? When he divided the rays of
light.
How many foreigners does it take to
corrupt ones mapners2 1t takes forty
Poles to make ono Rood.
How long dia Moses lie in the bul.
rushcs ? He lay his full length.
What animal is there in the clouds p
Rain, dear.
Why cannot the Emperor Napoleon in.
sure his lilc? Because rob.dy can make
cut his policy.
Wherein lies the difference between q
stock broker and brokers' stock: One
is agent for property, aud the other .
proper tie for gent.
Why does a scul ptor die a horrid
| death ? because he makes faces and busts.
! Why is y washer-woman great fool
Because she sets ont the tubs to catch
soft water when it is raining hard.
Why would patchwork quilt be an
acceptable present from a quarrelsomo
neighbor? Because nobody could doubt
It's being peace offering.
When is bread alive? When there is
little Indian in it.
Why is doctor like cobbler? BE
practices the healing (heeling) art.
Why is sanguiaary epistle like sur.
geon? Because it is letter of blood.
Where was Adam going when he was
in his thirty-nintA year? Into his forti.
eth
If Mr. Rowland liill were to give each
of his children half q sovereign. why
would he be ike the rising sun? Because
he tips the little Hills with gold.
Why are railways Ike laundresses -
Because they have ironad all America
and have occasionally done little mang-
ling.
Which is the most difficult train to
catch? The l2.4Q, because it is ten to
one if you catch it.
Why is a dog biting of his own tail
like good manager? Becaus, he makes
both ends meet.
What periodical expresses what the
welded state ought to be9 The Art
| >hoart1 Union
Why are under graduates like geese
Because they live upon the commons. they
arc crammed, they are pluaked, and whcp
pluckei arc readily sold.
What quadrupods are admitted to balls.
operas add dinner-pastics? White kids.
/ Which monarch had the most reason TO
complain of his launlress John, when
he lost his baggage in the wash.
What reg 5iMent was adam in !? The
Buas.
What is worse than raining cats and
dogs llailing omnibuses.
Way is temperance man sure not to
sink Because he keeps his nose above
water.
Ii pig wishes to build himself hab-
itation how would he set about it? He
would tie knot in his tail aud call it
pigs tie.
Why is lovely ung@.ady like
hinge? Because she is something to a
doro.
IAn amusing thing occurred in tho
! n t.I - Il I