The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1863-09-11
Mlisteuar1eous.
Spare Lines.

Why is whispering breach Of good man
ncrs? Because it is not aloud.
"Daily Evening Mail"-a lover calling on
his sweetheart.
Wanted by an attorney, clerk to engross
other peoples attention.
No man can avoid his own company-so
he had best make II as good as possible.
When is lady's neck not neck? When
it's little bare.
Vanity Fair says that the Pomp Of War is
the irrepressible niger.
God gives every bird it, food, but does not
throw il into the nest.
No faithful workman finds his tasks q
pastime. We must all toll or steal-no mat.
ter how we name our stealing.
A sour old bachelor says that no always
looks under the marriage head for the news
Of the ipedk.
Why is mans brewery like tho we'll OF
the Israclites?
Because Hebrews drink there.
Waiting times arc times wherein God is
pleased to give tho people some sweet tastes
OF his love, and lifts up tho light OF his
countcnance on them.
A fellow out West gets of tho following
definition Of "widow'-"One who knows
what's what, and is dcsirous Of further in-
formation on tho same subject"
An idle man always thinks he has right
to feel afIrontcd il busy man docs not do
vote to him just Us much of his time Us he
himself has leisure to waste.
"Julius, why did mt you oblons your stay
mt the soasido?" "'Kaso, Mr.. Smith, dcy
charge 30 much" "liow no, Julius "'-
"w6y, do landlord charge dis colored indi-
yidual wild stealing do silver spoons"
No statue that the rich man places ostcn-
tatiously in his window, ~ to bo compared
10 tho little cxpcctant face pressed against
the window pane, watching Tor It's fathcr'
when his days labor is done.
Mail contract for tho United States. There
is only Quo "Mail contract" says young
lady, "that she would care about embracing
or cmbarking in, and that is promise oil
marriage"
"what object do you sOO?" asked the
doctor. The man hcsitatod for o Tow mo-
mcnts, and then replied, "lt appears like II
nckass, doctor, but l rather think 1t is your
shadowT'
Virtue consists in doing our duty. in the
several relations that We sustain, IN respect
10 ourselves, and to our icllow.mcn, and to
God, rs known from reason, conscience and
revelation.
"Ah," said Sunday school teacher. "Ah,
Caroline Jones, what do you think you would
have been without your good father and
.pious mother?" al suppose, mum" said
Caroline, who was very much struck with
tho soft appeal, al suppose, num- as should
ba' been a horphan."
An inquest was held lately on tho body oil
q young man who, 10 tho attempt to snatch
a kiss from tho unwilling lips OF girl, fell
down stairs and killed. himself. Not great
while since young lady broke her neck IN
trying to cscap, kiss. Tho question now
is. shall kissing be given up as dangerous
amusemeutf
"I have always been astonished," said
Mrs. Smith, eat the anxiety OF young ladies
for bcaux, but l never pitied female more
than when Miss Mountdathcrs lett my school.
Seeing her gazing toward the sky. | asked
her what sho was looking for?" That
beau said she. (which is told OF in Genesis,
rs being set in the cloud; | wish he'd come
down."
Whatever talents q person may possess to
amuse and instruct Others, be they ever 50
inconsiderable, no is yet bound to exert
them; II his attempt DO Intellectual. let the
punishment Of On unaccomplished purpose
have been suiicient-let mono trouble them
selves to heap the dust of oblivion upon his
efforts tho pile they raise will bctray his
cravo which might otherwise have been I'M
known.