The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1863-07-03
Taking up a Collection.

! Rarely have we heared OF better story, or
better told story than this, from reverend
gentleman in Missouri:
The life of preacher in a new country,
from secular poin: of view, is hardly as
smooth and free from difficulty as position
in more cultivated and populous communi.
ties usually appear 10 be. The people are
thinly settled here and there, engaged ia
different pursuits, though chiefly agricultural
Being collected from all parts of the older
States, and gathered from every class of
society, they meet upon the same common
ground, upon terms of easy familiarity, and
restrained by no irksome conventionalities.
People in aew country generally have a
pretty hard time OF i. They live a sort of
rough and tumble lie, wearing out their
hest efforts in struggle for existence. Un-
der these circumstances the material some
times absorbs completely the spiritual; and
TIE people lot unfreeuently get SO far be-
hind with the preacher they have TO be
powerfully stirred up" from the pulpit.
On one occasion We had a visit from the
presiding elder of our district at one of our
quarterly meetings. We had not paid our
preacher 'ary dime,' = as the boys say, and we
expected scoring from the elder.
Well. We were not disappointed. He
preached US a moving discourse from the
text " Ore no man aRything." At the close
of his sermon be came at once to the subject
in hand.
"B:e;hern." said he, have YOU paid
Brother &: yihing this year? Nothing
~ all, l understand. Well, now, your preach
er canno live upon air, and You must pay
up-pay up. that's the idea He needs
twenty five dollars now. and must have it,
Steward. well take up a collection nor.'
Here some one of the audience near the
door began TO q" slide out,
Don't run don't run exclaimed the
elder. Steward, lock that door. and fetch
ME the key;" he continued, coming down out
of the pulpit and taking his seat by the stand
table in front
Tho Steward locked the door, and then de-
posted the key on the table by the side of the
elder.
Now, Steward" said he, go round with
the hat. must have twenty-five dollars gu,
o. this crowd before one of you shall leave
this house.
Here was 4 "tix." The congregation were
taken all aback. The old folks looked aston
ished; the young folks Uttered. The Stew
ard sravely proceeded in the discharge of his
official duties, The hat was passed round.
and at length deposited on the elders table.
The elder poured .the funds" on the table
and counted the amount.
Three dollars and half, \ SLOW start,
brethren. CD round again. Steward
We must pull up heap stronger than
that :"
Around went the steward with his hat
again, and finally pulled up al The elders
stand.
Nine dollars and three-quarters. Not
enough yet. Go round again, Steward"
around goes The Steward The third time.
Twelve dollars and half, Mighty
Slow, brethren 'Fraid your dinners viii get
cu!d before YOU get home to eat them Go
round again, Steward :"
BY this time the audience began 10 be
fdsety. They evidently thought the joke
va, getting to be serious. But the elder
was relentless. Again and again circulated
the indefatigable ha: and slo~ly but surely
the "pile" on the table swelled toward the re-
quisite amount.
Twenty four dollars and a half. Only
lacks half a dollar. Go round again Stew
ard
Just then there was tap on the window
from the outside; a hand was thrust in
holding half dollar between the thumb and
finger, and young fellow outside exclsiu-
ed.
"Here, Parson, here's Your money. Let
my gal cut O'there? I'm tired of waitin' for
her."
In was "ihe last hair that broke hecamel's
back : and the preacher could exclaim in the
Language of Ike Turtle" -This'ere meetin's
done burst up"