Daily Ohio statesman. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1855-1870, 1863-06-16

tlvlty.", Truly, 10 be a soldier In this Depart
ment "A no great shakes and l would suggest,
"A Uncle Sam 10 accommodating enough TO give
his brave cons, who voluntarily go forth TO do
battle, a choice Of location, to pitch their tents
In this section of Dixie. feel confident that
newcomers cannot fail 10 be delighted win
aoldieripp after nine months campaign among
us: and II every one Of them don't return home
a nkernel," will guarantee the majority TO 70,
turn confirmed "nuls," covered with shell OF
cheap glory at that. There has been q great
deal OF "glory" returned home from this ar,
my, l am aware but there Is plenty leit, ano
"dog cheap" We manufacture the article ou'
here, from the raw material, and for FEAR o
shrlnkage, plaster It on thick. The last stocA
we used up was rather green, but YANKEE in
genuity succeeded in making 1t salable, more
especially that portion manufactured Tor ior-
eign markets. We are o great people, VIC army
of the Potomac, and q warlike people, NUMBER
ing great many braves, with countless cniels
reside, principally, on the banks OF nopie
river, to the "sunny side' OF Wnlch We somo-
times migrate, but being OF domesac Iu,n o.
mind. aa often return. IL may be that our peo-
pie will, In the course OF time, take long
Journey into the "wildernes." Our head priest
is also of opinion that we will eventually DO
come q travelled tribe, If he can succeed 10
seducing US from the savory scent OF our
fathers kitchen. "Soft Bread" he Informs u.s.
Ia very unWholesome, and has demoralizlng
tendency; in consequence Of which bellei
he recommends o change of diet to nam,
after which strange god he recommends
faithful and diIigent search. Now, We are
very humble and obedient set oil braves, nul
it won't do to try and cram Ham, or any oil MS
descendente, into our "aoit bread.baaket," by
long shot That's what's the matter IL
there are any ambitious candidates Tor inlIIA-
tion into our holy brotherhood, would say 10
them, come now, come Immediately, armed
with password, signs and grips OF the united,
Universal, Union saving, Sott'head League,
aud Join with US in opposition 10 any aud All
who seek to deprive us OF the much lOVed
/" loayes. 4" We are the only simon'pure
"LesRue" In existtnce--tbe old Xxx original
League--"born amid thunder and baptized in
blood" aud if zoe can't lick the butternuIs and
eat soft bre ID, who in thunder can Don,t
tarry in the "clty of ein," else ye be damneo'
but
Like true soldiers who love their eaIe,
Come and be one OF us;
We IeVel In soft bread and cheese,
Every son.ofagun OF ".
Well, if keep Oh much longer In the above
strain, may create the impression that we are
not such great people ou. here, after all--that
we arc too light hearted, and (taking myself for
exsmple) too light. headed for thegrave respon-
abilities we have assumed that We dance too
much aud work too little. We do dance some, but
who would not darce when "uDcle" pays the ti-
p,r. l. ouly costs him $45O, 600 per day for our
tribe; cheop dance houte, isn't it2
There is but very little tranapiring here to in
4 10. la nta
sanee once in while, artillery duels at long
range, and eLeetiOnee,ing drills at all hours,
make up The items. A new system of tactics
has been introduced, the authorship OF which
is generally accredited to FoTneY, of the
Chronicle and Press, by means OF which he
hopes to line bis pockets and please his master
He msuageq, through the "poWers that be," to
moropolze the army circulation with his paper,
having full power, or which is the same thing,
his agents have, to ccn6sclte all other dOcu-
mepts as contraband. No wonder he crows
loudly over his increasing circulation 10 the
army. II is not love for his hireling sheet, but
necessity, which compels The soldier to pay ten
cents q copy for il. They must read, and 10 is
the only alternative.
We expect plenty of fuu here shortly. The
boys think our managers are making prepara-
tons for grand pedestrian performance, to
wind mp with hurdle race. The track over
which this Is to come OF is, of course, contra
band, but 1t is generally believed the winning
post is located 10 eight of Washington. When
il does come off, will give particulars. D..
Respectfully. "TYPo."
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