The Weekly Perrysburg journal. [volume] (Perrysburg, O. [Ohio]) 1861-1???, 1863-09-02
Apt Anitera.lon's ArtruI Aid.

The New York Saturday Press gives
this extraordinary specimen of ALTERATION
in regard to chess.playcr, whom it styles
Artesianus:
Ardent, aspiring mbassador.attacking
Artesianus, alive aud active, accomplishes
achievements apparently above actuality.
All America, alternately astonished and
alarmed, admires and applauds an ability
actually Alexandrian. Albion acknowl.
edges attainments as abundant. and acquire
mcnts as afluent as ancient Altred's. Arid
Africa, auroral Asia, and antipodal Austria
liza, aghast at an aspect assuredly atlautean,
alike agree, and award an audible approba-
ton. AS an Atlas among anglomaniacs, Ar.
tesiauus arouses agitation, and assumes an
attitude almost appalling and again, as all
amateur and athlete at an antique amuse-
ment, Artesianus always arrests attention
and awakes alarm. As an acquaintance
ahable and otiectionato, as an author agree
able and amusing, as an annalist accurate
and authentic, as an annotator analytical
and acute, as an adversary audacious and
aggressive, rs an ally advantageous and ac-
ceptable, Artesianus attracts admiration.
and adorns an age admittedly Augustan-
an adept at all arts, an adroit advocate. an
tiQuity's annals alone afford an available
analogy.
Adam ate apples; ArteSanus appreciates
ale. Abraham adored altars; Artesanus
affects Anglican affinities. Achilles aban-
doned associates and allies; Artesanus
alienates acquaintances and adherents.
Ajax astonished Argives; Artesianus as
tounds Alleghanians. Artaxerxcs assassin
ata1. Art fIriUhtc Ariat;Ioo a,.,;J
ed ambition; Artesianus mathematics ag-
grandizement. Alexander assaled Asiatics;
Artesianus attacks Americans. Apollo ap-
pears airy, Appelles artistic, Aristotle abstc-
mious, Augustus authoritative, Antony ac-
complished, Attilla austere, and Arthur
armipotent; Artesianus alone appropriately
assumes all analogous attributes. Albeit
at an adolescent age, Artesianus abhors
alike adulation and adornmcnt Although,
alas, abiect aspersers adducc abusive allie
cations, and arrant assurance alleges am.
biguous accusations against Artosianus, all
absurd and annoying attacks are actively
averted. Although atrocions anti-Artesians
are agog, all arduously attempted aggres-
sions, all absolutely abortive and aberrant
abettors are abashed
Annihilation attends adventurous antag-
onists, and an awful avengement awaits any
adversative advance. Avaunt, angry and
anonymous abusers Away, abominable
aud acrimonious accusers! Abjure am
bushes and ambuscades! Abandon arraign-
ments alike awkward and asnine! Accept
an advisable armistice, and adopt AMIGA
bic arrangements Armed against all adj
ventitous assaults, as assiduous as an ant,
as alert as an adder, as agile as an ape, as
atlrightful az an alligator, as ascetic as an
alchymist, and az august as an autocrat,
Artesianus acceleratiyely advances along
an astral arena amid adulatory applause,
amasscs af1luence, and aims at augmenting
accomplishments already ample. And al
an appropriate age, Artesianus abdicates
all avocations. adjusts all accounts ,>Ssnd
awaits an apotheosis. Angels and archan'
gels arrange on aureato abode, and amid
anthems and autiphonal attunings, Artesi-
anus angelically attired. ascends. An af-
tcr-world acquicsoes and approves.