Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1863-05-22
miscellaneous.
The Bachelor Uncle's Story.

The Bachelor Uncle's Story.
Harry, my boy, you are not going
down in that atrocious piece of felt 2"
clapped my hand rather neryously to
my hat,
"Why not, Uncle Simon isn't it re-
spectacle enough 2"
larry, you're my fayorite nephew
sit down and you shall hear how | lost
my wile-that should have been-thro
bad hat -
l passyely obcycd.
"Wcston Thorn and were room mates
at the--lIo,el in our young days.
There We dwelt together, and, as perversc
fate would have it, we both fed desper-
ately in love with the same girl, Fanny
Trevor. Talk of your modern beauties
i never saw a pretter creature than
Fanny was checks like an apple bios
som, sir, and even that made you wild
with her coquettish sparkle. Sac wore
her auburn hair in bright braids within
a net I've liked nets ever since"
"Simon ~ said Weston Thorn one
night, {" I'm in love 2"
So am |, Thorn. - | answered.
And I'm in love with Fanny Trevor !
Are you." said |. :" So am l."
Weston and looked at one another
steadily for about five minutes.
Smon,' said he, will you give her
up"
No.
Nor will | So here's to the health
of him who wins the brightest jewel that
ever shoae on human breast ~
He tossed of a glass Of gold-headol
champagne as he spoke. pledged him !;
and although forty years and more have
passed, yet, | taste the sparkle OF that
bright wuc whichever | remember the
hour.
Well, our twin suits progressed with
varying success 70: weeks. Sometimes
Fanny made Thorn desperate by waltzing
with me sometimes shc woke the spirit
Of Cain the murderer in my Heart By
wearing Weston Taorn's white roses in
her belt. At length, one day, we went
arm in arm to ask old Mr.. Trevors per-
mission formally to address Fanny Papa
Trevor was 4 Jolly old soul, and laughed
heartily at our amicablc rivalry.
Go in, boys, and win her he ex-
claimed. Fanny may take her choice
-whichever it is, sae'l! BE- pretty sure
OF good husband :"
Weston" said [, on our way home,
Il shall invite Fanny to that rural pic
mic up the Hudson river tomorrow no
place more favorable to the declaration
OF love than umbrasaou shadows and
green river shores"
"Just my opinion" said Thorn. 81
shall write a note OF invitation also"
took special paias to keep sharp
lookout on the next morning. Hurry as
| would however, Thorn walked out Of
the house kid gloved and Panama.hatted,
just two minutes and a half before |
could succeed in tying my confounded
cravat to suit myself. | gave my hair
one parting rake with the unyieding
bristes of the brush, dived into the
wardrobe for my hat. and started full
for the street. | could always walk fast
er than Thorn, so | felt little apprehen.
sion on the score Of not oyertakins him.
a had dim idea that the young
ladies in the hotel corridor looked rather
comicaly at me as sprang downstairs
and the little boys in the gutter grinned
and commented as | passed, but | was
in too great hurry to pause for rehec-
tion, until tull length mirror, standing
by way of advertisement at the door of Il
looking-glass and picture frame store,
suddenly showed me to myself; a young
gentleman got up in the extreme of fash
ion, all but the head, which nj ght have
belonged to a Bowery loafer
:" q BOD iates what villainous hat !.
it would have made a rowdy OF Lord
pamerston himself-rusty battered ,seedy
i thought [ had committed that hat
to the flames weeks ago. Weston Thorn
must have 6shed it from its obscurity and
put it in provoking convenience to my
hand. All my own iault-of course it
was why hadn't had the common sense
to know what | was putting on my head ?
II felt hurriedly in my pockets-thcre
was only just change enough there to
meet the exigencies of the day. No help
for it-back must trot.~
"The sun had mounted high enough to
make the homeward walk no pleasant
taing to t Ike in a hurry. OF course my
trembling fingers selected the wrong key
at frst-anl it was sometime before l
could turn the wards 50 as to admit my
SELF However, in walked at last, and
opened the wardrobe with nervous haste.
There hung the real hat in provoking
neatness-anl it was no small aggrava-
ton to my state of mind to think could
not blame Thorn for my own carelcssness
As | turned TO 60 out, the drcsslng-gIasS
displayed to me such an inaamed and per-
spring visage that moments delay III
cologne-sprinkling was Indispensable
and this completed, off started for the
second time on "a run.
"What jerk | gave Mr.. Trevor's
bell-I wonder it had not come off in my
hand. The scared servant answered the
jinging summons as if she had expected
no milder news than that the house was on