Evansville daily journal. (Evansville, Ind.) 1863-1866, 1863-10-15
O6G q ally doupttaG.
THE FUNNY CORNER

--@se@@
A MAN at Wick, the other day, pur-
chased large skate, and on opening it,
discovered in the stomach box OF ''Pat- /
ent Congreve Matches, warranted to ig-
mite in any climate |
FIRST IRREsIsrIBLE-' Shant ]. pre- |
sent you to her ?"
Second Irresistible no, rather |
think not. Her father deals in railroad |
stocks Don't approve of that kind of
investment"
An advertisement of cheap shoes and
fancy articles in an Eastern paper has
the following aotG bene: an. B.-La-
dies wishing those cheap shoes will do
well to call soon, as they will not last
long J"
We are told that in making fashion
able ladys dress the needle of the seam
stress must travel thousand feet
RATHER CooI.-"There has been a
slight mistake committed here, said the
house-surgeon, "of no great moment,
thought was the sound leg of Mr.
Higgins which was cut off. We can
easily cure the other-comes to the same
thing"
Enthusiastically speaking, the
beggars most ashamed of begging are
those that have to beg pardon.
BELLows-An enterprising genius adj
vertises to supply bellows at short notice.
His stock in trade is a red hot poker and
a thin-skinped huli
THE ladies must not take it for grant
ed that he who is always trying to bow
gracefully to them across the street is
always fright bower"
CUTTING REPLY.-Said one student to
another, whom he caught swinging a
scythe most Justify in field of stout
grass:
Frank, what makes you work for a
living? A fellow with your talent and
abilities should not be caught engaged in
hard labor mean to get my living by
my wits"
"WeIl, Bill, you can work with duller
tools than can, was the reply.
The PROGRESS OF CIvILzATIoN-Stern
aunt" In my time, miss, the men look
ed at the women's faces instead of their
ankles"
Young lady" All, but my dear aunt,
you see the world has improved, and is
more civilized than it used to bel
A Coz. FOR THIRSTY SoULs-Why is
delirium tremens ike pinching boot
Because its tight fit.
a sCHooLBoY "down East" who was
noted among his play-fellows for hi;
frolies with the girls, was reading aloud
in the Old Testament, when, coming tc
the phrase, making waste places glad,
he was, asked by the pedagogue what il
meant. The youngsterpaused scratch
ed his head-but could give no answer
when up jumped more preeociou
urehin and cried out II know, what i
means, master It means. huggiRg- tn
gals; for Tom Ross is alters huggin' en-
around the waist, and it makes EN-, a
glad as can be.
LORD NORM, who had perfect antiI
athy to music, being asked why he di
not subscribe to the ancient concerts, an
it being urged as reason for it that h
brother, the Bishop of Winchester, did
Cay, replied his lordship, "ifI was a
deaf as my brother, I would subscrib
tool!
A doctor-ordered one of hiszp
tients to drink -four of sulphur and vi
ter. The patient expressed his disgu!
by significant grimaces.
at is only the first glass that is han
to drink, said the doctor -
Then. rejoined the invalid, II wi
begin with the second = ee
Captain" said a soldier of Il
army of Italy, ~ should Ike to carr
home souvenir of this country to n
sweetheart The corporal says that Il
best thing they have produced in tn
country is their Raphaels Now, won
it not be well to carry her back few
them?"