davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Dldu'f Know Whether 10 be
Union or Secesh

The Louisville Journal tells this GOOD
story, under the beading, Mice Pies Us
Tracts
We heard good story yesterday related
by German who was confined in one Of
the hospitals at Nashville. which proves
conclusively that sick soldiers spprt ciate
fUod for the stomach more than food. for the
mind
A rebel lady visited the hospital one
morning, with a negro servant, who car
RED a large basket nn bis arm, covere d
with white linen cloth. She approached
our humane friend, and accosted him
thus:
Are you a good Union msni'
Il Ish dat was the laeOnic reply Of the
German, at the same time casting hone.
tul glance at the aforesaid basket,
That is all | want to know replied the
lady; and, beckoniug the negro to follow,
she passed to the opposite side of the room
where rebel soldier lay, and asked him
the same question, to which be yery
promptly replied:
Not by id sight.
The lady therenpon uncovered the bss-
ket and laid a bottle Of wine, mince pies.
pound cake and other delicacies, which
were greediIy devOured in the presence of
the Union Soldiers. who felt somewhat in
digbant.
On the following morning, however.
another lady made her appearance with a
large covered basket, and she also accosted
our German friend aud desired to know if
be was Union man.
Il ish. by Got; no care what you got;
bese Union
The lady then set the basket on the ia
BILE, and our German friend thought that
the truth availed 10 this case, if it did fail
IN the other. But imagine the length of
the poor fellows face when the lady un-
covered the basket and presented him with
about bushel Of tracts. He shook his
head dolefullv. and said:
i no read English; and beside, dat rebel
on te mother side Of te house need dem so
more as me-
The lady distributed them and left.
Not long alter came another richly dress
ed lady. who propounded the same question
again to our German friend. He stood gag
ing at the basket, apparently at luss for
reply AT length he answered her in YAM
bee style. hs follows:
by Got you DO get me dis time; vot you
got NIT tie basketf
The lady required an unequivocal an
s"er to her question, and was about to
move on, when our German friend shouted
out.
If you got tracts. bese Union; but if
you got mince pie nit pound cake unt vine
l bese secesh like te tibel.'
Sick soldiers have little desire to read
tracts when they are famished for the
want of those little delicacies so conducive
to the recovery of hospital patients. When
our ladies yisit hospitals with tracts, we
would suggest the Importance of accom-
panying them with a basket of PROVISIONS
aud they will be better appreciated.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
A Yankee Device,

Ooe of our peculiar, slabsided, gauut
Yankees lately emIg' ated and settled down
IN the West He was the very uictur. of
mean man, but as he put himself TO
work in good earnest TO get bis bouss to
rights, the neIgh6ors willingly lent him
hand. After he had everything fixed to
his notion, a thought struck him that he
had DO chickens, and be was powerful fond
OF sucking raw eggs. He was too honest to
steal them, and too mean to buy them. At
last thought rstuek him he conld Dor
row. lie went to q neigh Dor, and thus &C.
oOsted him:
Wal, l reckon you hsin't got an old ben
ror nothin' you'd lend me for few weeks.
have you neighbO
i will lend you one with pleasure re-
plied the gentleman, picking out the very
finest in the coop, one that happened to de-
sire to set.
The Yankee took the hen home, and
then went to another neighbor and borrow
ed dozen eggs. lie then set the hen, and
in due course CT time she Matched out
dozen chickens.
The Ysnkes was again puzzled; he could
return the hen, but how was be to return
the eggs? Another idea-and who ever
saw a live Yankee without one ?-he
would keep the hen until che had laid
dozen.
This be did, and then returned the hen
and eggs to their respective owners, re-
marking as he did so:
Wal, reckon I've got as fine dozen
OF chickens as ever you laid your ewes
on. and they didn't cost me a ceut, nuth>
err
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Military NeceSsity.-A Happy H.
lusIraIiOn.

When peace, with all it's real and SUBJ
| stantsl benefits, smiles bene6cenily upon
the people, then nothing is heard of that
! plea Of all tyrants sIpce the world began,
military necessity" But if designing
! and ambitious men Influenced perhaps by
foreign jealousy and innate ambition, after
an effort Of years, succeed finally in dis
! turbing the peaceful relations Of their
country, and bring trouble and distress up
| on the people, then be on your guard
| against their insidious wiles. They will
tell of your willy foe; Of his courage. his
strength, his numbers. They will plot for
| your armies to be defeated, and your
| treasure wasted. for your young men to be
| destroyed and the whole people to be dis
| satieied with their dreadful situation and
| gloomy prospects, and then they will tell
| you that military necessity" dictates the
surrender of the right If self government
in order to defeat the foe. The old fable
of the horse lie quite apropos an al illustra
| ton
RSop tells US that the old horse finding.
the other beasts Of. ihe.6sld unwilling 10
acknowledge him as their sovereign, APP
! piled to man for assistance in subduing
his foes Man Immediately consented,
and proceeded to pus q saddle upon his
back.
Halo :" cried the horse, what is that
for ?"
"Oh, it will be necessary for me to get
on your back and have the full control of
you for time, if am to assist you," an
| swered the man.
The next step was to put the bit into the
| horses mouth, to guide him right, Man
took a whip in his hand, fastened a pair Of
-
The horse did not like the spurs, and Oh.
jected, but was satisfied when told that it
was ali for his own good, and they would
be- used simply when he did not pursue bis
enemy fast enough. When man was noun
ted and the horse about to start on his ca
ree- of conquest, wise serpent addressed
him as follows:
You fool q! why have you given Up lib
erty thus? You were free, and now you
have placed master upon your back.
and he can make you do whatever he
pleases. Why submit to such despot.
ism ?"
'.0h you do not understand" replied
the horse, IL placed power in his hands
only for time, that l may conquer my
enemies; when that is dine can throw
him eff"
The ser 7 ent replied, "never you have
surrendered your liberty, man has obtain
&c a seat upon your back, you have sub,
United to be saddled, bitted and bridled
and so you will continue forever hereaf
ter"
The horse laughed, and the man cried
out, and plunged his spurs into the side of
the horse:
Dent listen to him, he's only copper
head"
just so it is now with the abolition ad
ministration. The saddle. the bride, the
spurs, the whip, are all ready. The peo-
pie, apparently, stand quiet and ready to
be mounted, whipped and spurred, D.
mt lie deceived. Military necessity
will fasten upon you an incubus Of debt
and taxation; military satraps will eat out
your substance and destroy your children
and finally, With large standing army Of
a different race (negroes) they will ensiavs
you. Be warned in time-JerSeyrile Un !
ion,
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

In good cid times before the war, writes
friend in the lower regions, the candi-
dates for Office in this Southern country
were accustomed to resort to strange dod
ges to conciliate the people and get their
votes.
One of them, in the Old Dominion. Ubils
stumping the outskirts of his district came
early one morning upon a clearing where
solitary man was hoeins Alightinc from
hls horse. be took up an extra hoe standing
by, and commenced working very vipor7
ously, at the same time delicately bintinp
who he was, and for what purpose be had
come.
The man, however, was obtuse, not
seeming conscious of his visitors design
until the sun was sinking beneath the hor.
zon: when he suddenly frightened up and
said:
Wall. I reckon you're mighty good at
hoein', and if / was only ever in Old Vir-
ginny, I'd vote for you
The dismsyed politician did not let the
grass grow under bis horses feet till he
was safely nut of North Caroline, where
! be bad lsbOred hard ell day for nsughs.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Men Who Want the War TO go
ON

All the abrlitionists, who want slavery
torn out root and branch even if the coun.
try is ruined want the war to 90 on, but
they don't want to help.
All the Federal assessors, who make
three and four dollars day, want to
help.
And the tax collectors who get ten per.
cent on communication money, want the war
to go Oh If it takes every man-but them
selves.
All the shnddy contractors. who have
made priucely fortunes by furnishing rot
ten clothing t. the soldiers, want the war
to 60 un-without them.
All ship owners. who sell the govern
meDt rotten vessels. for double the cost of
good vessel. want the war to go on
for thew can efford to paY $500.
All the Gotten spectators, who go in
cahoots with the generals to steal cotton.
want:the war TO 60 op-until the cotton is
all stolen.
All the knaves who sell old spawned,
ring -bOued and GIind horses to the govern
ment at exorbitant prices, want the war to
60 on.
All the provost marshals and under
strappers, who get so much head for ar
resting Democrats, want the war to 20 on
without their assistance.
All the New England manufacturers,
who got dividends of fifty per cent want
the war to go on-until ell the poor men
are killed off
All the railroads. who are growing iich
by charging the government exhorhitan'
rates for transportation, want the war to
go on-until the Government is bank
rupt.
Lincoln and bis cabinet, who hope to
make their of6ces perpetual by the bay
onet. waut the war to go on.
But the people want the war stopped
the fret moment the constitution is vindi-
cstive, and those 10 rebellion evInce dis.
positioD to return 10 their allegiance.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Perpetual Motion.

A Western correspondent of Harper's
Magazine gets off the following oue:
i was travelling IN Virginia by stage,
and spending the night at a country tas-
eTn. was greatly entertained by the talk
OF the stage drivers and Others sitting by
the bar-room fire in the evening. One old
cOdger worked off a good thing.
When | was down to the fair, q good
many years ago, there was q prize offered
to one who would come nearest to making
perpetual motion.
Well. all sorts Of machines, of ell shapes
and materials, were fetched there and
shown and the makers of them told how
long they would run. As l was walking
about among them l seen a sign over a
tent
All who want to see perpetual motion,
end no mistake, meet here and pay the
admission fee. and went in.
Very soon queer little man got I'D
OF box that sersed for q platform and
addressed the audience:
Ladies and gentlemen, am going to
exhibit the most wondriullest invention
sou ever seen. 1t has been running for
fu:l three years and If nobody stops it, it
will run forever.
And here he untolled a strip Of paper.
This is printers BILL ojoly continued
And he held it up to the gaze of the
people. and they admitted that whether
she bill ives paid or NOT tLsy bad been
Sold.',
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
DiRbOlISn.

The St. Louis Union, (Republcan), in
speaking Of the arrest Of e1 Provost Mar
sbal Stracban, says:
"Strachan induced Gen. Mcneil to shoot
the ten guerrillas, in retaliation for the
murder of an old man, about a year ago -
1t Sd y: In this transaction Strachan got
himself into o serious scrape. for which be
was q few days since indicted ~ the
Grand Jury of Marion county. On the
morning appointed for the shooting of
these ten men, the wife of one of the men
thus Condemned to be shot. came to Pal
myra with six little children, called upon
Strachan, and told him her husbard was
condemned to be shot that day, and these
were her children-that if her husband
should be murdered she would be unalle
Co support the children, and begged the
iuhuman wretch, with big tears in her
eyes, to release him fvom the SENTENCE
StrachHn at first refused but the poor wo-
mans opportunities were 30 persistent that
he finally told her if she would raise him
$500, and permit him TO use her, he would
release her husband. The heart broken
woman canvassed the town of Pulmyra
and found that she could raise the sum &c
money required Mr.. Revely. of Lagrange,
Mo-, called at our ofice some days ago and
told us he furnished $500 of the amount,
anG that ne had Strachar's receipt in his
pocket for it. The money was raised;
Strachan pocketcd it; compelled the poor
heart broken. afflicted woman to submit to
his bellish lust. and released her husband,
For this crime against God, against law.
against ell the mob er impulses and instincts
Of human nature. be has been indicted by
the Grand Jury of Marion county.
The editor Of the Union has since been
arrested. Is it because Of the publication
of the above article?
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

While at Berryville, Virgins, writes an
army correspondent, we established our
lines, and ell persons residing within them
and desiring to go beyond them were rec
CURED to take the oath of allegiance. An
Intelligent 'contratsnd' wishing 10 90
through, on learning the requisitiOD, very
innoeently asked:
What lie de oath p
You must swear to support the CoDsti-
tution.' replied the marshal.
Why raid Sam, Il can't hardly sup
port de ole woman, times is SO drsfful
hard =
The marshal let him naas
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

DANIEL WEBSTER If the internal ia
natics and abolitionists ever get the power
IN their hands, they will override the Con-
stitution, set the Supreme Court at def
snce, change and make laws to suit them.
selves, lay violent hands on those who diff.
fer with them in opinions, or dare question
their infaIlibility, and finally bankrupt the
country, and deluge il with blood.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
DENTISTKK.

Dr. F.. b. H &C H RI NE
THOULD respectfully inform the inhabitants o
w ofiet and vicinity, that after absence {
some years. has returned Joliet for the purpose of
making 1t his future home, and adopts this method to
Inform his friends and the public that he has take
the rooms formerly occupied by Carpenter Pierce,
OVER BROWNS DRUG STORE,
where he will be pleased to all who msy need
GLASS DENTAL OPERATIONS.
Those VINO may employ him may be assured that all
Operations Will be performed Ia . neat, trtsty and
faithful manner.
Nov. 20, 1861. MA If
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
W. G.. OMPS JON,

ARCHITE CT AND BUILDER,
T1TILL furnish Plans aud Specifications, Nnd take
w contracts for superintend the erection of
Churches, School Houses, Public buildings and DWELL
4ngs.
Shop and Office On Chicago Street. near 6 "A St.
L. X. Depot. n33-tf
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
The marshal let him pass.

ONE VOTE HARD TO GET late no.
litical barbecue the guest OF the occasion
announced, with a knowing ljtk at the
fair portion Of his audience, that he was a
candidate for nothing except nsatriuaony.-
An old gentlemen in the crowd exclaimed.
90 that all the ladies could hear: .Ab
well, reckon that you can be elected 10
that-it takes only one uote' That one
however, as some Of our bachelor eotempoA
reries rsy DO oompetapt to testify, 10
sometimes hard 10 ga
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

ANDREW Jackson Sir. the abolition
patty is a disloysl organization. The pre-
tended love for freedom means nothing
more or less than civil war and dssolu~
ton OF the Union. Honest men of all par
ties should unite to expose the inten tions
end arrest their progress Andrew Jack
son, Just before bis death.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Joliet signal Rate. OF Aav.r,l.l1s


Job printins Ofsy,r ydsserip,iO ,v,i ,h,,..s,S
xpsditiOuslye Xecuied 70 order onI ,h.,",..
Anissortment of blank kepteon,,.n -
- All orders for Adveftistr., -, = - Z = II
De accompanied BY cash, unless some nrrson 2na a
uoecomes responsible for the same, "a "
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

What is the principal difference between
the swallow aud the cati
Ii is an admitted fact that one swallow
does not make a SUMNER but any cat can
make q spring.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
Joliet Maple works.

TtHARLEs Z. MUNGER, Manufactureranddealeri
~ every variety of
MARBLE MONUMENTS, TOMB STONES FUR
NIfURE, &C., &C.
the Rock island Depot, Joliet. Illinois. Order
ON abrOadreapectfully solicited
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
The VOICE OF AUTUMN.
By ". @. ARYANT.

There comes from yonder hight
soft repining sound,
VIII ere forest leaves are bright,
And fall like flakes Of light,
To the ground.
1t is the autumn breeze
That. lightly floating on,
Just skies the woody leaves,
Just stirs the glowing trees,
And is gone.
He moans by ledgy brook,
And visits with a sigh,
The last bale flowers that look,
From out their sunny mock,
At the sky.
Ger shout ing children flies
That light October wind,
And kisses cheeks and eyes,
He leaves their merry cries.
Far behind
And wanders on to make
That soft uneasy sound
By distant wood and lake,
Where distant fountains break
From the ground
No bower where mai dens dwell
Can win moments stay;
Nor fair untrodden dell;
lie sweeps the upland swell
An away.
Mo urnest thou thy homeless state,
Oh, soft Iepining windl
That early seek'st and late,
The rest it is thy fate
Not to find.
Not no the mountains breast,
Not OF the oceans here,
In all the east and west;
The wind that stops to rest
Not TO find.
By valleys, woods and springs,
Wonder thou should'st grieve
For all the glorious things
Thou tou chest with thy wings,
Anu must leave.
When i Would Die.
would die wien the day
Lingers bright in the west;
When the bird flies away
To his soft, dUwny nest;
When the hum Of the bee
Is not heard on The hill,
And the woodland and lea,
And the hamlet are still.
When the sad, weary heart
Can no longer abide,
Oh how sweet to depart
At still eventide,
When the suns parting rays
Flash glory and bliss,
And the heart is all praise
BE my death like to this.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

They are pretty strong down South, is
We may judge from the fellow who says,
'he bad "a her be bob tailed dog in
Confederate camp than . cUmmander-in
chief 10 the Federel army
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
The Empress EuEenIe.

In public the empress never looks over.
dressed. A severe simplicity always char.
scterizss her toilette. while everything in
material, fit, and color, is as complete Ia
harmony as q Sonata of Beethoven, This.
is the great secret of "the art of dresU.W
A woman who wears discordant ribbons
breaks that sense Of visual melody con.
monty called good TASTE" without which
not even the Duchess of Golconda en-
dress well. Certain colors are jost &c ia
coDgruous and inbarmonic as certain notes
in music; and the srtistes who compose,
dresses for the Empress Eugene usually
study these natural laws of harmony A
carefully as the painter the hues Of the
palette. just now it has been discovered
that the psrasOl, the dress, the bonnet, the
gloves, and the CATERS must be all of the.
same color to produes the most uuioe ard
pleasing effect. And thus a completely.
dressed lady M longer o6snds the ess,
Eitb contradiction of coIors OF all the
SHADES and without the order Of the rain.
bow, but presents . perfect pictnEe, as.
melodiousiy charming to the eye a. the
air Home. Sweet Hume" is to the ear.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

institutions must be fitted b .hs S;sr. -
60. ages o. the World's mind just ss oos's
clothes are altered and sdjustsd to the diff
lsrent ages OF bis body. When either are.
outeroxn they SHOULD be csst -asiesy
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

A young man will compliment bis sweet
heart by telling her that her breath has
the perfume of roses, without being ssham
ed that his own has the stencil Of
whiskey and tobacco.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

That lady looks Oldest who tries to con-
cesl her age. If she refuses to let her age
be uuOn her toDgue,It will be all the more
in her face.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

A THOUGHTFUL MAN.-An eccentric man
in Bath, Maine. was asked to contribute
- foreign mission.
He gave quarter Of dollar, but stop
ped the agent as he was departing, and
said:
Here's dollar to pay the expense Of
getting the quarter to the besthen.'
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

MRS. "GoyERNMeET"-Mrs. Lincoln is
is said to have been lavish in splendid
winter hats and t,iletteP. r0
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
ID Il N IST Try .

DRs. ALLEN SALTER, permanently
S375R5s14 located IN Joliet is prepared 10 perform
uIrTSSA all operations in the profession, in the
N4-AD latest and most approved style. Arti
ncal Jobs from single Tooth TO full sett inserted on
tAtmosphoTic principle.
Teeth Extracted without pain.
OFFICE Jefferson ST., in Hawley's New Building
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

It used to be said that the price of lib
erty is eternal vigilance il is now shown
70 have grssnbsck yalus Of three bandrsd
dollsrs.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

ANDREW JAcKsoN.-The legitimate au-
thority of the government lie abuudaDtly
sufficient for all purposes for which it was
created; and its power being expressly en-.
umerated there can be no justification for
claiming anything beyond them. Every
attempt to exercise power beyond these
limits should be promptly and firmly OPP
posed; for one evil example will lead to
other measures still more mischievious;
aud if the principal of constructive powers,
or supposed advantages. or temporary cir
cumstances. shall ever be permitted to JUS
tify the resumption OF a power not given
by the constitution, the general govern
ment will, before long absorb all the pow
ers of legislation. and you will have in ef-
feet. but one consolidated government T.
Jackson's Farewell Address, March 3,
1887.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
When Nicholas Biddle, famiIiarIy. calIei

When Nicholas Biddls, famiIisrIy. called
Nick Biddle, was connected with the
United States Bank, there was an old nee.
gro named Harry who used to be losfing,
about the PREMISES. 0ne day. in social
mood, B;diIs said to the dsrkeE-sWeiI.
what is your name, my old friendf'-
Harry, sir. ole Harry said the other,
touching bis seedy hat. Old. Harry, said !,
Biddle, why that is the, meme they eiys 10,
the devil, is itnDtP Eyes, sir,';ssis ttg
eolored gentleman. sometimes ole Eafrv
and scmetimes old Harry, and Sometimes
ole Nick '-''.'',-'-
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
CHAS. E. Keller,

GENT FOR THE UNITED STATES AND AMER
IA lean Express Companies, will forward Freightand
Valuables TO all points of the country. Notes. Drafts
and bills collected and proceeds returned promptly
Joliet, July 10, 1858 matt
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10
SHOW REsPECTToTHE DEAD.
JOLIET BOOKBINDERY.

VVHE undersigned will bind all kinds at Books, in
III any desired style.
Jobs will be neatly executed and warranted.
Prices moderate.
WIN. STAEHLE, Bookbinder.
Blum Street, Zone door north ofthe Gas WOrks,)
FEB IL, 1868. Joliet, Illinois.
Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1863-11-10

GALL at D0oLIFTLBs and get one OF those excel.
~ IGnt Swine MAoHuVs.