The Union. [volume] (Georgetown, Del.) 1863-1866, 1863-09-25

! 90" bA"J hoAASu man. Dcht WIN ASe, cOhl-
ing feebly up to the porch. He asked if he
might come in.
Certainly, sir, if you have business here"
| He came tottering in, and stated his busi-
ness to an aid. He wished to enlist in the
United States army
"But you are too DID,"
II am only sixty"
But you are too feeble"
81 think could drive team or cook. /
have come thirty-three miles on straight
line to see you and wish to live and die with
you. These Secession devils out yonder have
just worried my life out of me-bothered me,
cursed me, stole me poor, tried to force me
into the rebel service; swear they will force
me in yet. That's pretty flag over the porch.
haven't seen that flag in many weary day.
| saw it in Jackson's time, in the arof 1872"
Theold man was assured of protection with
out enlistment, and went on his way.
The SELF-PossEssED AcroR. = The late
Charles Incledon was proverbial for the cool
ness with which he regarded the turbulence
ofthe gods. He always listened to the storm"
with the utmost nonchalance, and occasionally
addressed the noisy tenants of Olympus One
evening he was prevented from singing by a
dire conflict in the most classical part of the
house, and after pacing the stage for some
time, " nursing his wrath to keep it warm,"
he pulled his watch deliberately from his fob
and thus addressed them
Tad;as and c,a,tlsu,a,, ;f ,,o,, ,r-o,,lJ oo,,
trive to finish this row in a quarter of an
hour, l would esteem it as particular favor
Pm engaged to sup with friend at half-past
eleven, and have very little time to spare"
This good-humored rebuke had the desired
effect, and the belligerent parties grounded
arms " Immediately.
LOVE AND SKATINo.--Wou ouldn't it be re-
ffeshing to have column or two of skating
items every week during this hot weather.
The very word has a soothing effect, though
perhaps we can't say as much for the effect of
the term above conjoined with it. Anyhow,
blow hot or blow cold, here's a bit of
"pome" too good to let pass in any weather,
John Brougham's Tread light, for my heart
isunderyour feet love, p is.moretha equalled
by a lover who thus goes skatingon his lady's
heart.
'sHer heart is like frozen lake,
On whose cold brink stand;
Oh, buckle on my spirits skate,
And take me by tho hand
And lead, thou loving saint, the way
To where the ice is thin,
That it may break beneath my feet,
And let a lover in"
MEMBER OF Press Us. MEMBER OF Con-
oREss.--" believe you are acquainted with
Hon. Mr.. -" said gentleman to an edi-
tor, as well known Representative Joined a
group who were conversing, and was intro
duced to one or two of them.
Yes" was the reply; " Mr.. - has had
HE honor Of an introduction to me-"
"The honor, sir the honor P' said the NJ.
c., bristling up with Importance.
Certainly why not Am not editor of
a newspaper, while you are only member of
OongressH Our profession makes and un-
makes such men as you at pleasurep
NJ. G. had never looked at the matter in
hat light" before, and this shot between
Wind and water set him thinking.
PuNsTERs CATEcHIsM.-Why should the
male sex avoid the letter Az
Because it makes men mean.
What is that which every man can divide.
,ut no man can tell where it has been divided2
Water.
Why is woman often making noise1
Because she is generally in hustle.
What part of ship is like farmerY
The tiller.
What is the Oldest tree in AmericaH
The elder tree.
What day Of the year is a command to 60
theadH
March 4th.
ENOUGH TO CONDEMN WATERING PLACES
At Dieppe, in France, famous watering
place, there is police established whose duty
{ is to rescue persons from danger The fol-
owing notice was recently issued to them:
+" The bathing police are requested, wh,n
/ lady is in danger of drowning, to seize her
~ the dress, and not by her hair, which Of
entimes remains in their grasp. Newfound-
and dogs will also govern themselves accord
nglyp
A SLEEPY churchwarden, who often played
It cards, hearing the minister use tho words
shuttle off this mortal COIL" started up.
ubbed his eyes, and exclaimed " Hold on
Us my deal p
A SENTIMENTAL young man thus feelingly
Expresses HIMSELF Evan as nature benevo-
'ntly guards the rose with thorns, so does she
ndow woman with pins"
"WHERE is THE EAST ?" inquired tutor.
ne day, of very little pupil.
Where the morning comes FROM" was
le prompt and pleasant answer.
KEEP YOUR BODY souNp.-As wine savors
the cask it is kept in, the soul receivee
noture from the frame through which it
orks. e8Nar
ASPIRATIONS.
The belt the highest aimed the furthest shoots;
Low aimed, the arrow quivers In the ground
Ere half lie force is spept
A MERcuAsT, advertising for boy, adds.