The mountain Democrat., 1863-11-28
In the Sleeping Car.

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In the Sleeping Car.
Have you ever taken Il sleeping car fni
"A l"ug RIDE, on any Of our Western and
! Eastern railroads! ! 1t is a very curious
experience. To the old traveller such a
journey is fall Ji incidents. Accustomed
To the trip betwren Philadelphia and
Washington, never make it without
gathering material for amusement aud re.
Election. The best course is to secure n
iull lower berth. about thirty minutes BE-.
fore the rush begins, anl from you: roost
you can. unoh>crved, hear much and See
many odd sights.
The conductor is a constantly pcrplex-
cd pcrsoragc. lie is questioned, >coldcd
and importunrd by turns. He must ex-
plain, apuio.i>e and exp0stulSte. In this
melee it is marvellous how he preserves
his temper.
Mr. Conductor SAYS n brcathlesS pas.
! >cnger, who has just got in by the New
York train, give me sleeping place
Have you Il ticket, sir?'
Yes, | have my through ticket
Sorry, sir, but you must have sleep,
ing ticket. You can tct il AT the office in
the station house bat must hurry up or
you vii! lose Your chance.
And away goes the passenger with
about ten chances to one Of being too late
Il have taken places for two. says a
Soft->pokcn, handsome Young fellow, with
a blu>hing woman on his arm.
Yes, Sir says the polite master Of Ger.
emone>, the lady can sleep below, and
YOU in the upper berth
Bat She is my wift-and cannot sleep
alone or with anybody but me.
Sorry, sir, but our rules Lre absolute
| can put another lady with hcT.
But she is my wife. tell you, indig
nantiy responds the gentleman.
i do not doubt you, sir, but DO moi
know it, and to avoid trouble, We make an
absolute rule to keep the ladies and gen.
tlemrn separate
And there is no remedy but to submit,
or throw up their tickets, and take anoth-
er car. Frequently a family enters
father, mother. nnrSr, hahy. The same
struggle cnSurS on the temporary divorce
Of husband and wife ; but the dispute is
more readily ryconcilcd, and the partie,
pile in. After a while the matron gently
Are you comfortable, Augustus, denr?
Perfectly. j. the Smuthercd reply from
the upper tie'.'
DO cover up your throat, dearest; you
know you are not weiI-a4e your feet
Aarm ::
'Al right ga>pS the husband, like II
man on the top Of hay loft.
Jane, what is the matter with baby
Can't YOU keep him quiet? Bless you. he
i, choking Hand him over to me-
Aud hear n squalling package passed
over to the kind mothrr, who >ootheS it
soon To rest. Enters fat man, weighing
about 500 pounds avOirdupniS.
'Condnct"r, where's my berth? 2
You have but one ticket. and will
plea, get in alongside Of thi; gentlemen
who happens to be delicate dandy,
Immediately above me, on the second
Shelf, and who rains down upon me per-
feet shower Of mingled perfume. The
struggle, in which participate to the cx.
tent Of seeing huge pair of legs, like
twin anacohdaS, hanging before me, ard
hearing series Of angry growis and
gruntSS and when the mass settles on a
wicke,b bed. it shakes the whole vicinity,
and leaves me IN doubt whether it can
hang suspended or will fall aud crush me.
II, -
but you ale IL very large man. You have
pinned me to the wall oh, shall Suifo-
cate
Can't help it, sir; I paid for my ticket,
and Intend to get my moneys worth.
Imagine the fat ones sleep, and Snorc,
and sweat, and the miSeries Of the nice
young gentleman.
Some of the inexperienced travellers un.
boot ard uncoat themselves, which is al
WAYS a mistake. Bundle in as you are,
is the theory Of sleeping car. At last
we are disposed of The whistle sounds;
the engine shrick>; the bell tolls; and the
great train plungcS into the outer dark.
ness. \ voice opposite, Heavens, how
hot it is. Conductor, there is no air.
Open the door
i Object! shouts a consumptive Con.
gresSman 4 am not well, and | don't
mean to contract another cold
Another voice:
Charley, pass me that flask and then
| hear a gurgIing sound, and presently
perceive an aroma Of Cognac, which ex-
cites two persons of various opinions a
little in the advance.
Stranger ! says the first, pass me your
flask, and | will return the compliment
when we reach Wizards (which | can
hear is being very promptly done.
What a disgrace it iS!' says the pro-
testing temperance man, that this place
should be turned into a groggery.'
by Jove!' cries ont the owner of the
flask, her" is Cough, the great lecturer
have a smile, my eloquent friend 2 At
which there Is u general laugh, and the
consequent subsistence Of the heroic op-
pnnent Of BacchnS.
Before the Sleepers finally adjust their
hard pillows, gather up their scanty COW
ering. and ascertain whether their bed.
fellows, if they have any, are friends or
foes, some rich soliloquies and dialogues
take place among those who have not ac-
customed themselves to this method Of
transportation.
I say, CONDUCTOR exclaims q victim