The Tipton advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Cedar Co., Iowa) 1856-1962, 1863-07-09


and W necessarily inhals from it wha
is either hcalthful or infectious.
We pause sometimes in a path Il
scan our own foot. prints, but it is to-
late to remodel or to retrace them.
Men are called free thinkers, who
instead Of thinking freely, are free from
thinking.
If young lady would sack her lover
without hurting his feelings, let hen
give him the sack she has on contents
included.
A man cannot burrov in his count
ing room for ten or twenty Of the best
years of his life, and come out as much
Of man and as little of a mole as when
he went in.
Tom Hood speaks of bird building
its nest upon ledge over the door of a
Doctors Office, as an attempt to rear its
young in the very jaws Of death
Ferguson, the poet, died Of star-a.
ton. A splendid monument adorns his
grave, and on it is written, "He asked
for bread and ye gave bin stone. -
The finest sarcasm ever uttered.
The Mississippi river isn't much of
stream, after all, if you merely look at
it from St. Paul, Mimi. Last week
man waded across it just below the dam,
leading steer By the horns.
Mrs. PartiDgton is of opinion that
Mount Vesuvius should take sarsaparilla
to cure itself of eruptions The old lady
thinks it has been vomiting so long moth
ing else would stay on its stomach.
Mr.. JoNEs-"You know, my dear,
that am liable to CONSUMPTION, and, in
case the habeas corpus should fail, that
that"
Mrs JosEs-"Don't give yourself
moments uneasiness on my account,
Jones if you can't find substitute, |
have no doubt that can "
A Joker, on hearing that certain
persons were mutilating the copper cent
by cutting out the head and wearing it
as a breast.pn or badge, at once sug-
gested the following definition Hopper-
head-One who ou!rages the good sense
(cents) Of the nation. +,
rsTThe great pyramid of Egypt
stands upon a base measuring 100 fee.
each way, and is 500 feet high, its
weight being II, 76O ,O0O. 900 of pounds.
Herodotus states that, in constructing it,
100000 men were constantly employed
for twenty years. The materials of this
pyramid could be raised from the ground
to their present position by the combus-
ton Of about 48O tons of coal.
A LUCKY M1ss.-A distinguished en-
gineer officer, who took prominent part
IN the bombardment of Fort Pulaski, has
made calculation based upon the de.
struction caused BY the late powder ex- Y
plos'on IN Eigty.sixth street, New York
cIty-that had our artillery succeeded in
exploding the enemys magazine a, Fort
Pulaski, to which its main effort was
directed, the result would have been the
annlhiIation of both the opposing forces
No man would have been left to tell the
tale, no stone left upon another to mark
the site of the contending foes.
deserts arc quite frequent in Asia
Many OF them are of great extent. The
most remarkable is that known as the
Great Cobb or Shamo-sea of sand-its
whole length being probably not under
twelve hundred miles, its breadth not
being positively known. Another waste.
probably the most remarkable Of its
kind in the world, is the Arak Aicmce,
or sat desert, in Persia. 1t is about ,
four hundred miles in Tenth, and upward c
OF two hundred in breadth. There are, L
besides, four other deserts in this divis- 5
ION OF the globe, the whole occupying
three-tcnths Of its surface.
PARENTAL ADVICE -" Ven Won At
rlves at the dignity of sawn' wood, La.
fayette, if you is elevated to that ere
profession, mind an always saw the big
gest tast, cause Wy? you'll only have the
htt'e uns to saw yea you gets tuckcred
out. Ven you eats pi as | 'sposo YOU
may 1t you live to be man, always cat
the crust tust, cause the crust amt
good thing to top off with, especially if
ITS tough and thick as sole leather. -
yen you piles up wood, always put the
o,s ones to the bottom-always, Lafay-
t ,.., cause Its mighty hard exercise to
INT EN- to the top of the pile. These
are the results Of hobservatiop. LaG'c,te
an may be depended on, an its all for
your good lsay it." IVY, ladder" re.
s.ponded young hopeful, "vot a 'normous
sperIence you must a had p
aas' Artemus Ward being at celcbra-
aap~scd, exbihi,ion was called upon for
the phair SEX Ladies, scs I, turnin to
the beautiful femails whose presents was
perphumin in the fare grown, hope YOU
are enjoying yourselves on this occashun
and that lem maid and isc VOTER of which
you air drinking may not 90 agin vou.-
May you alters be as fare as the son, as
bright as the moon, and butiful as an ar.
my with Union fags-also plenty good
close to ware.