The free South. [volume] (Beaufort, S.C.) 1863-1864, 1863-10-31

commenced.
Yes sir, spoke to Mr." pointing
to a iuryman with face"s red as a blood
beet.
"What did you say to him g
Witness appeared reluctant to tell. The
attorney insisted upon an answer.
"Well," said the witness, &" told him
he had u ID pretty face to sit on
Jury to decide whether a man was habit
ual Grunkard tr not! -
"Wheres my wife ?" inquired our
friend Nil, on retur .ing home early one
evcning, and missing his better half.
"She's gone to bed with the toothache.
was the reply o. some member ofthe fam
lily. 49,, 80.
We'll" said the indignant Nil, "if
she had rather go to bed with tho tooth
ache than to go with me, let her go; - and
he forthwith settled himself to the perusai
of tn latest war news.
"Here's your DcHiy 7ih,es-all about
the battle ~ cried IL ncwsboy the other
day, vending his wares. An individual
with shoulder straps, hearing the exciting
announcement. purchased copy, End.
J, ,tilv glanci,g ut the head lines OF the
dispatches, remarked to the dealer in at
ternoon literature. Where is all about
the battle 7 can't see It. mo said tie
boz, land you never will see it Us long as
You hang around this city
The devils own missile is the recently
invented rifle nusket shell. which our
warm friends. the English, have furnished
the rebels. When one of them burst III
side of Il mali it is impossible to extract
! all the pieces Of lead and copper. They
are ike an ordinary bullet. but have Is
copper chamber inside filed with per-
cusSion.
- In some of our army corps that have
been long in active service. it is said to be
a custom of the soldiers to gamble for
drinks by passing the fingers smartly
through the hair OF the head, and then
closing them tight and crying "odd or
even ?' Quilp, who has seen something
of soldier life, assures us that, though the
troops are bad enough he has never secn
any such Hce-entiolsness as that.
i A Mrs. Wannamaker lied at New Pro
pect, Bergen County, y. j. last week,
who weighed previous to her death seven
! hundred pounds. She was great eater,
; and disposed OF an ordinary sized ham i'll
two meals. At her last dinner twenty
! four ears of corn made slight portion Of
her repa,t.
SIS that the tune the old COW died Of ?
asked un Engl siiman, Nestled at the il
dusrry with which Il New Eng glauder
whistled Yankee Doodle.
No, beef" replied Jonathan, THAT
ares the tune the old bull died of.
! The following is deceptively promul
! gated un,ier the head OF geological infor-
nation: The black tapir is found in
MANY districts of Sumatri. but the red
tapir is found chiefly III the District OF
! Columbia
RAKEs-A captain of vessel loading
Goals went into Il merchants counting
house and requested the loan OF rake.
The merchant, looking towards his clerk,
replied ~ have number of them but
none, believe, wish to be hauled over
the Goals.
HOOP SKIRrs.-The latest style OF hoop
skirts is the self-adiusting, double back
action, hustle etrlscan, face expansion.
Piccolomini attachment, gossamer indie
structible, polucti comorama.
A aegro boy was driving mule, when
the animal suddenly stopped short and re-
fused to move. Wont go, ell ?" said
the boy, feel grand do YOU Is'pose You
forget your fader was jackass."
Ii you wish to cure scolding wife,
never fail to laugh at her with all your
might until she ceases. then kiss her
quick-sure cure and no quack medicine.
When you see dwarf, you may take it
for granted that his parents never matie
much 9f him.
Eighty National Banks, with an aggre-
! cate caDital of S1O. 34(. 600 have al,eat v