Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1862-01-11
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JOE BOWER's WEDDING.

er's wedding in the California mountains
is worthy of persual:
The wine had been passed round and
round, the music had ceased. The time
for making Joseph Bower and Nancy Har.
kin one had arrived. Every heart throbbed
with m ost pleasurable emotion. The young
gentlemen desired to know how Joe "
would stand it, and then the young ladies
were anxious to see how "Nancy" would
suffer the awful shock. Others, again,
who had closely observed the turn Of af-
fairs during the evening, fixed their atten.
tion upon the judge, to see how he would
come out Of the scsape.
At length the trying moment was en-
nounced. The judge arose very cautiously
from the chair, which he had occupied in
one corner Of the room, and casting his
eye over the company, he recognized the
sheriff o! the county who was present as
an invited guest. The Judge had imbibed
Just enough to make him forget the nature
of his business He was full of his iu-
dicial talk and required nothing but the
presence of the sheriff 10 start him. Look
ing sternly at the officer, he shouted:
Mr.. Sheriff, open the court and call
them to order
A general twitter followed this com
mand, in the midst of which the sheriff
took the " court" gently BY the arm and
led him to his seat in the corner, at the
same time informing the august parsonage
Of his mistake.
Everything now bid fair for pleasant!
termn alton Of the affair until another an
noyance which was nothing less than tho
absence Of the bridegroom, was announced.
1t turned out that he had just stepped
across the street to Join his friends in
parting drink-but before his return, some
cold bIooded wag had whispered in the ear
Of our foggy judge, the cause of the delay
in the proceedings Instantly the chair
in the corner moved, and in tha: direction
all eyes were fixed.
Mr. Sheriff. slowly drawled the judge
bring Joe into court on a supenar -
the Judge had his own way of prononnc-
!ns the woce-then addressing the bride,
who stood in lla foreground. and hung
her head in confusion he, added, "I spose
you're the plaintiff. Well, don't take on,
innocence and virtue will be protected by
this here court
u
The Judge was again made to see his MIS-
take, and would have been considerably
set hack had it not been for corrective
in the shape Of forty drops Of the crit
ter, which he instantly applied
In few moments all was ready in down.
right earnest. The bridegroom had ar
rived full Of Joy. The bride in gorgeous
array stood at his side. The company
pressed forward. The excitement was in
tense. The Judge never looked so digni-
fed in his life. He evidently felt every
inch a Judge.
j ce Bo-w-c r-s' commenced the
man Of law, in tina. distressing style Of
speech with which he was invariably trou
bled when under the influence Of liquor.
",I-oe Bowers, stand up. Have you any
thing to say why sentence -
stop, stop, stop, Judge" shouted the
sheriff, from the back part Of the ROOM
You are not going to hang the man, but
marry him
The Judge drew long breath and
winked rapidly, but stood his ground we'll.
Recovering himself he proceeded
"J.hoe Bowers; 90 you t-take Nam
cy H-H Harkins for y'your wife, SO help
y.you God p
This was tolerablc offer, and so Joe
nodded assent.
IN Nancy Harkins, it now remains for
this here &C Court to -
Here the sheriff again interrupted the
Judge, reminding him Of the real business
of the evening.
"Mss N Nancy" resumed the Judge,
after being sc. Alright, |" do you t-take Joe
overs for husband, to the bbest OF
your knowledge and belief, Or id do you
not ~
4" Tou bet" softly answered the light
hearted Nancy.
The Judge then took tie hands Of the
happy couple, and Joining them, wound
up the business as follows:
at now r-remains for this Court to
pronounce you J-loe Blowers, and You
INFANCY II FIarkins, man aud wife; and,
(hers the Judge paused to wipe the presp-
ration from his face, m m may the L1.ord
have m mercy on your ssouis! Sheriff
remove the cu!pri.s !"
The company roarea, Jos and Nancy
weakened The sheriff was taken with a
leaving. The Judge let himself ont in a
glass Of apple jack. Taken as whole it
was the greatest wedding ever witnessed.