Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1862-01-24

SCIENTIFIC QUIzzIEG The late DR.. Wilson,
senior. Fellow Of Trinity College, Dublio,
though a very grave man himself was fond
of quizzing and puzzling the country folks,
who came to inquire after their relatives and
friends in the college. One day seeing q
man in the court with letter in his hand,
! gapipg and staring about, and not knowing
where to 20, he walked up to him aud
fravely inquired what he wanted. The man
answered.
Can you tell me where to find Mr.. Della
hunt2"
ayes" replied the Doctor; "do you see
that building before your"
"Yes, sir"
"Then cruelty this quadrangle, and take
the diameter of the plot beyond it, enter the
opening before you, ascend the legneous
grades, then turn to your left, and you will
I tind him either peripatounding in his cubicle,
dominating in his lectory, or perispound.
ing through his fenestra."
The poor man who understood nothing of
all this, and not remembering one word but
the last, said:
And pray, sir, what is fenestra1"
Towbich the Doctor replied:
ut is an orifice in an ediice to admit
luminous particles"
"ob, thank you," said the poor fellow.
AN AWFUL MuDDLE.-A correspondent
of the Columbia is. C.) Times gives the fol-
lowing melancholy illustration of the un-
certainty of the types. A young gentleman
Of the name of Conkey having been united
by the holy bonds of Wedlock, sent his mar
riage notice with a verse of his own COM
position, to the printer for publication, as
follows:
at Gosbam, July 20. A. Conkey, ESQ Attorney at
law, 70 Miss Euphenla wiggns, both Of GOshsn.
That beat in silent melody,
Time with it's Tavsses inn parts
No bitter fusion to its scstacy.
Mr.. Conkey looked with much anxiety
for the issue of the Sentinel, in order to see
his name in print. The compositor in
whose charge the notice was placed hap
pened to be on spree at the same time,
and made some wonderful blunders in set
ing it up, thus:
Law, to Mir. Buphesia PIggins, both Of Goosdam.
Jove is an onion of to heads,
That belt in softest melody,
Time with its cabbages imparts
no better feed Of an extra day.
Phancy Mr.. Conkey's pheelinks
LOVE SoNGs FOB LUNATICs.-The Bedlami-
tish bosh that nowadays is published in the
way of ballad literature is really of 80 sense
less and lunatic q character, that one would
bhihh 'hO oSLAOCS WIN WEOb6 III W6T6 uOL
clothed in their right mind, but were one
and all invested with straight waistcoats. Any
stuff that has a metre, and occasionally
rhymes, no matter how devoid of reason It
may be, is deemed worthy to be dubbed
sentimental ballad; and we are sure the SAM
pie following if only set to music by some
popular composer, and sung at a few con-
ceris by some Of our first singers, would
soon be warbled in our drawing rooms and
| whistled in our streets:
| Gaily the tiger.cat tuned bis guitar,
| Serenading the magpie with feathers and tar;
| SWeetly he Succeed at her, sourly he sighed,
! HLBdy bird, lady bird, will be my bride?"
| She for the elephant sadly had pined,
Ate but an OK, and then vowed she ad dined;
| Carried photograph close to her heart
WIapJ ed up in lobster, bank notes and plum tart
| At mdUight the rivals they met in the whale
And fought bI the light of the grasshopper's tail;
The elepha hau stood on his trunk to take breath,
And the tiger-cRt cozily hugged him to death,
Then with cabbage STALK boldly he wrote:
"Come, love, and tread on the tail Of my coat;
See thy own Crocodile whistlina for thee
He grGaned-gaye q gurRle-a cold cOrse was he
What do we seek redress for? Injuries
Where do we find it? In juries.