The southern aegis, and Harford County intelligencer. (Bel Air, Md.) 1862-1864, 1862-11-29

Ihere warn enytn!ng ever tapped IN my
house that lasted more than a week. Oh
no II amt reddy to die yet" Isee the
"rulin pashin was strong to deth," jest as
the poets say but as soon as got joke
out of him | knew he would survive. So
thinks I to myself, I'll see now eff can't
fetch him to by another joke; so scs l,
"Kernel, suppose 'tappin should kill you,
you would go to World of spirits p
Wen I sed this, he jumped rite up out
of his cheer laughin, an takin me by the
hand, SEES he, "Majer, you are the best
trend I've got. Wen I'm sick you doctor
me, and wen I'm down spereted you jest
joke me rite out of the dumps" SEES he,
"Majer, I've a good mind to make you
Commander-in-Cheef of the Army
mo, no. ses |, "Kernel, don't do that,
for [ should think you had sumthin agin
me, an wanted to hand me over to the
Abolishinists to be punished ~
But the Kernel didn't get over the ell
ecshins easy | tell you. One mite he had
a high fever, an was crate deal swelled
up with wrath an bad blood. So I told
him that eff he wouldn't be "tapped" he
must have sum leeches put on his temples
to take down the inflammation. This he
didn't object to, so put a hull lot on his
face an sum on his breast. Wen they got
suckin nicely, ses he, "Majer, these
leeches are ravenus fellers They would
soon suck all the life blood out of TELLER.
eyes," ses |, "Kernel, they are jest
like the contractors an shoddyites.-
The latter are the leeches that are
now suckin the life-blood out of the
country, an eff they amt stopped an this
war closed up afore long, the country will
be dead-there wont be enything left but
a lifeess corpse"
The next mornin the Kernel was bet
ter, but he still continues mighty down in
the mouth. He ses Greeley an the Radi-
kals have deceived him, an after all, the
Abolishiu Proclamashin is unpopular; but
he SEES as he never "goes back on eny one'
he's bound to stick to it an put it through,
"uuless the breechin breaks"
The Kernel an | have also been bizy
sence [ wrote you last in getting up the
next message. He has been ritin his
idees on little slips of paper about two
inches wide, as they have happened to pop
in his head, an then submittin 'em to me
to sort of polish up. The Kernel ses that
riten message is good deal like gettin
out timber for barn in the woods. Fust,
you want the stills, then the posts, then
the girders, then the plates, an finally the
rafters. We amt got the stills fairly hew-
ed ont an squared yit The truth is, the
Kernel is kinder worried as to how exact
ly to lay the foundashin. Wilson, who is
now here, ses the stills must be Abolishin
timber, an no mistake. | telled the Ker-
mel that SIGH stuff was the porest kind of
Eastwood, an wouldn't stand nohow.-
Then he thought of putin in mixture
of Abolishin timber an sum constitushin-
al saw-logs, but | telled him that that
would make it so cross grained that it
wouldn't bear eny weight at all, an by the
time we got the rafters on it it, would all
smash down in a pile. oval" ses he,
1 Majer, I must do sumthin to keep my par
ty together. [ must contrive sum sort OF
q mixture that won't look too much Abo-
lishin, an yet that won't drive off the old
genewiDe friends of freedom" "Wal,''
SEES /, 81 don't think your party kin hold
together much longer, enyhow. It seems
to me it is nifty nigh now fallen to pieces
an it won't take much longer to knock it
I into so many pieces that you can't no more
putty 'em together than you kin find the
tail of rainbow"
'sWal," SEES the Kernel. s.Majer, dom,
4 you think I've done we'll in keepin it to
gether as long as / have 7" SEES /, "yes
Kernel, eff there's d Teller in this countr,
that ought to git out patent for Excel
sior Political Prepared Glue it is you.--
4 You've kept together the most cross-grain
1 ed, knotty, knerly lot of political timber
that ever was made up into eny politica
party SEES ], there's the Creole,
stripe. Now it's enuf to give eny party
the dyspepsy to have such a set of bran.
! bread, free-luv, long haired set of feller
Fin it. An there's Gerrit Smith an hi
] stripe, kind of maroon-colored, mongre
breed of politicians, sumthin like eros
between Jamacy niger an an Eaquimaw
Ian then there's Wendell Phillips an Oh
Harrison, sort Of Abolishin alligators; al
I6neally, you've got sort of half-an-hal
! Ifellers iii your party, who try TO be con
seryatiye, who quote Blackstun an the Law
!, dicshinnaries, an set great stress upon be
ling very moderate. Now how yon' Y,