The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1862-01-16
VARIET Y.

Love is n reality, which is born in the fairy region
OF rOmance-
A lady out West has named her thirteenth child
Gratis.
At what time of day was Adam created little
before Eve.
al feel,'' said an old lady, that I've got abOut
through with this world shan't enjoy much more
trouble"
you are fat, and would like to fall oF-mount a
vicious horse.
When does n farmer act with great rudeness toward
his cora, When he pals its ears.
crusty old bachelor says that the talk Of women
is usually about Even their laugh is but he!
he ne -
The imagination of men is too often the refuge of
their Prejuiices.
TheJlOzians resemble dogs. that gnaw large bones
for the sake Of vety little meat
Ii you have the feeling of hate revenge, subject
10 TO a severe process Of mental chemistry, examine
into its nature, its uses its philosophy, and before
you have finished the scrutiny 1t will probably vanish
like n volatile substance into the air.
Siosr iLorughtful have probably some dark
fountains in their souls by the side of which, If there
were time and it decorous, they could let their
thoughts sit down and wall indefinitely.
sailor dropped out Of the rigging of ship Of war,
some l5 ID feet, and fell plump the first Lieu
tenant Wretch - said the officer, after he had
gathered himself up. where did you from 80
An sure 1 came from the north Of ireland, your
honor"
The sun sinks, and the earth closes her great eye
like that Of dying god. Then the hills smoke like
altars of every wood ascends chorus the wells
of day, the shadows, float around the enkindled
transparent reetops. and fall upon the gay. gem-ke
flowers And the FURNISHED gold Of the west throws
back q dead gold on the east, and tnges with rosy
light the lowering breast Of the tremuOus lark, the
evening bell Of nature
a. How DO you do, Mr.. Smith 20
a. Do l-hGt 80
'.why. how do you find yourself?''
81 never lose myself"
Well, how have you been ~
Been-beeu trhsTe -
s' Pshaw how do you feel -
:. Feel of me and see"
sc Good morning, Mr.. Smith
e It's not good mOrning-it's wet and nasty
And the parties separated.
DEFESsIBLE EDEFISITioxs.-July-Twelv prisoners
in n box 10 try the bar
States eviieuce-A wretch who is pardoned for
being baser than his comrades
Public abuse-The mud with which every traveller
is spattered on his road to distinction.
Bargan-A ludicrous transaction, in which each
party thinks he cheated the other
DOctor-A man who kills you to-day TO save you
from dying Tomorrow.
Author-A dealer in words who often gets paid in
his own coin
Dentist-A person who hnds work for his own teeth
by taking out those Of other people.
Lawyer-A learned gentleman, who rescues your
estate from your enemy and keeps II himself
Sensibility-A quality by which its possessor, in
attempting promote the happiness of other people,
loses his
Distant reIations-People who ina CINE they have a
claim to rob you if you rich and to insult if you
poor.
Housewifery-An ancient art, said to have been
fashionable among young girls and wives now
entirely out Of use, practiced only by the lower
orders.
Political Honesty-Various photographers have not
noticed this word. treating il, presume, altogether
as fabulous for definition, vide self-interest.