The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1862-11-29

~, remember now, sue eA1u. NePu eo'u
like that once when you were pre-
eentn -
Then, Mrs. Clark, you deny having kissed
hip!" si1Is
She threw her work aside suddenly, and arose.
p"Harry! is it possible that it was your"
avery probable, certainly"
"And YOU have concealed it al this time. You
are the most deceptive Of men," .1a.
"Don't blame me for doing what neither you
nor any other woman can do, and that is, Keep .
her age" aaie
II will not believe it." a bog
because you tried to surprise me into con.
fession, and failed But, see! here is the proof!
And l drew from my pocket the embroidered
hand kerchief, and pointed out her initials where
upon we mutually sgreed that she had made .
FORTUNATE MISTAKE, e:r.
LETTER FROM 0RPAEUs c. KERR.
2 80 From the Sunday Mercury.
6 Editor z. T-Tbe Venerable Cannon, my
boy, has melted sadly home to, Mugsv'Iie since
the removal of the late idolized General OF the
Macserel Brigade, and worshiping pessantfy
are exseperated At bic unnatural wrongs
/ cannot exactly, see, my boy, how this Ven
cradle man is 60 deeply injured by the said re-
moval; in fact. it does not appear TO me that ne
can have any interest in the change whatever;
but his appearance of deep afaiction has called
the attached populace crawl in tie dust at the
subduing aspect of bis inexpressible woe.
1t was on the Tuesday evening of this revered
and aged patriots arrival in adoring Mugville,
that he was simultaneously eerenaded by the
brass band of the Young Mems Democratic Chris
tian Association, which is composed exclusively
of Constitutional chaps he was frantically be-
sought to respond, by boy; and then it was that
he tell hapless and Venerable victim to the
great, besrtrending mistake of an inebriated re-
porter for a reliable morning Journal. The be-
loved old being meant to make only few plthy
telling remarks to the enthusiastic band, and
this was, in fact, his veritsble" al esq !
al socU SPEECH. 9ns aasasf.4
Thank you for your compliment "a voice:
"How are YOU old bootss" We're the boys to gire
the Rebels COMFORT" and cheere.) We are here
tonight to stand by the Constitution. (Avoice:
"Whafs Old Abe about2" Locking up good
Democrats in Fort Lafayetts!' "lVeN, It's oa.r
ovn fault, you know." I'VE deserve ,eorse treat
nenti" and hisses.) We abhor these Rebels as
much as the Black Republicans IA voice: I'VE
can qi,e the Re6les cha4they cant!" and applause,
but we also hate home-tyranny. Why was the
idolized General of the Mackerel Brigade re-
moved? "a voice: ITO please the Reeds! We
hare licked the Black Republicans in New York;
qlNe'ue done the Re6elsl" Gcod,") To spite US!
That's 90, boys! "a voice: "A,a aoe'A make
them loue us yeti" "7he Neao Yorke'ection ,iek1es
hem!" and cheers) Whose good was he remov.
ed for9 ia voice: '.for Jeff D@i.i", Three
cheers, boysi" and great entbusiasm.) Let His
tory show! "a voice: "lVeW maze him Prest'
dent in lss4!") Good night. -.
uo.n 90, Ia ~ tho tr,,o cDonch of Tho VpOpra
BILE Cannon, my bov, with all those patoiotic
interruptions which lend such q chsste rhetoric
charm to the extemporized oratoIy of our dis
tracted country; but how shall I express the
pangs which tore the breasts of the fond popu-
lace, when the reliable morning journal of Mug
vile came out next morning with six pounds OF
heavy editorial to show that the Venerable Gam.
mon had ruthlessy betrayed the excellent ma
tional Democratic organiza:ion!? How shall !
depict the public misery that ensued in Mugville
when that reliable morning Journal upon the su-
hority of its inebriated reporter, gave this as a
correct report Of the revered patriarch's
rs 5.e' SPEECH
The speaker said: How are you old boots? a.
voice: .'IhanG you for tie complinsent") We're
the bows to give the rebels comfort and cheers.
"a voice: eve are hsre tonight to stand by the
Constitution What's old Abe about? Lock-
ing up good Democrats in Fort Lafayette! Well,
its our own fault, you know; we deserve worse
treatment and Kisses. "a voice: We a6hor The
Rebels as much as the Black Republicans" We
can give the rebels what they want and applause.
"a voice: "But zoe also hate home tyranny
"WAy teas the idolized Genera of the Mackerel
Brigade removed?"l To please the rebels we
we've done the rebels good. A voice: 40
sp;se us that's so, boys" and we'll make them love
US yet! "The New York election tickles them
and cheers, "a voice: "Whose good asas he re
moved for? For jeff Davis three cheers, boys,
and great enthusiasm "a voice: '"Let history
shoari"); we'll make him President in lS64!o "a
voice: "Good night" aa rG.a.sr 81.
You see, my boy, this horrible justification
was the result ofthe reporters getting confused
about who was the speaker-him on the hotel
balcony or the laxative chap in the street. |!
our e xcellent national Democratic organization
! would have less talking during their public
speeches, my boy, there need be no such inhu-
man mistakes as that which has eliminated and
utterly prostfated the venerable Cannon.
On Wednesday took a trot on the wa..path
upon the architectural steed, Pegasus, and
found the veteran. Mackeral Brigade back at Pa
ris again. They had made great march from
Blue Ridge, my boy, and when reached the
| front tOOnu dScle0uuc cDdp IRON ClpciNO6t
taking observations He stuck . tall stick into
the groand, and scratched long line On The
damp sod, from the foot of this stick to the ex
,reme right Of the spec.ac!ed brigade, letting The
toes Of the front rs,k Of the Mackerels jus
touch it. Then he attached a powerful n.agni-
flying glass to about the centre of the uprigh
stick, and commenced looking through it yer!
intent}y ell along the line he bac drawn o. 81
observed hin, at.entively, and saysI :"Wh a
lis the nature iof your contract with the Govern
lnent, ny serious ffiend?" g 3a4 'aa h9a
I He rubbed the slaes with bic blue silk poke
handkerchief, and says he: Il have invented
this useful arrangement to ascertain whether o
' not the Army OF Accomac is really advancing
closely watch the line to which the toes Of th
front rank of the oarmy are already very near
and could almost swear that the forward move
ment is still going on. The average speed o
this army, Gays the scientific chap, caculatngly
shas hitherto been six miles in six weeks; bu
now that the war is about to commence in ear
nest, think that the troops are making bette
, time" 3f e5saa
And so they we're, my boy, SO they we're; 70