Urbana union. [volume] (Urbana, Ohio) 1862-1872, 1862-11-05

] HOlib VI bllS OLASCI PuuAAi6 :" va NS--S - 6@-
Just taken from his pocket and wondering i
the half civilized people of St. Paul evel
smoked anything more expensive than pipe
Turning to plainly dressed gentleman al
his side, be exclaimed:
"Are you-ah-acqusinted in St. Paul ?
80, yes; know most all of the citizens,
was the reply.
DO you, indeedT exclaimed the fashy
gentleman, Well, then, am in luck. Pret.
ty lively placer
"Quite so, sir Every man has some
thing to do, and all are making good living.
Do you live-ah--in St. Paul?'
AT do"
"Have you. any lawyers there ?"
"Quite too many, sir. That is my pro-
fesion."
The dandy looked at the man FIRST with
credulity, and then with a patrOnizing all
said:
Ihave reference, my good fellow, to first
class attorneys-men Of education, who are
graduates OF coIlegesl"
H light seemed to break in upon the mans
mind as he replied:
"Ahl see what you meanl No, have
no lawyers Of education. Are you a law
yer, sir2"
Initiating himself with Importance and great
condesccnsion, the young top replied to him:
"A graduate, sir, of the best college in
New Jersey. And if sufficient encourage
ment Is held out by the members of the bar
in St. Paul, I VIII stop among them and give
them the benefit of my knowledge"
The man seemed delighted. He at once
claimed the privilege of extending to the
stranger the bospitalities of St. Paul, and de-
clared that within two hours after the arrival
Of the boat public reception should be given
him.
As the sun was sinking in the West, the
Key City touched the levee at St Paul, Eand
the distinguished stranger was at once con-
Quoted to leading hotel, to await the arriva
Of the city bar in body.
In about two hours they arrived, and were
presented in due form by the man who came
upon the boat with the brilliant scholar, and
who introduced himself as Mr.. Spotless. Then
came Judge Kerby, Judge Anfsh, Advocate
Bloodeye, lawyer Keen, Knifepoint, Badax,
Hesrty, aud some dozen others-all anxious
to show their respects to the lawyer who had
been edicated' and was gwine to snow
EN- how they dew things down in New Jer-
sey.'
During the excitement from shaking hands
and taking drinks for the twentieth time from
the row of bottles placed upon the table, a
long, guant, six and a half footer came in
with both his boots OF, and without hat,
coat or vest, and in a stentOrian voice ex-
claimed:
"Evenin' court is now open, and I'll shoot
every man who don't attend in three minits. 7"
There was scattering from the room.
Some escaped by one door and some by an
other; but Judge Kerby grosped the lawyer
by the large hand and whispered:
"Follow me and you viii be safe"
Escaping by the back door and threading
unumerable dark lanes and cowyards, the
Judge and his young friend at length reach
ed the extensive livery stable at Allbones-
the maddest wag in the State.
Here they found a row OF twelve barrels
for the jury to sit upon, inverted water pals
for lawyers, and bundle Of hay for the judge.
The prisoner at the bar-who was being tried
for the murder of his mother with butcher
knife-was seated on a wheel-barrow, smok-
ing an Indian pipe, and swearing that he
could whip any :hree men on the jury.
"Good God gentlemen!" !" gasped the edu-
Gated man, can it be possible that this man
can conduct himself in court in this manner. {"
ats only lately that we have had so nice
a room as this" said half dozen of the law
yers. We used to meet in BlOOdeyes wood
shed-but this is extra
The presiding judge now called the court
to order and asked the prisoner if he had
any counsel
" Not oner' was the loud reply; but
if that ere chap with nice clothes on will
take holt of the job, I'll give him two cows
and hundred acres Of perary.'
Young Jersey was undecided and waver-
ing, but at length stutteaed out that he wish
ed to be excused; whereupon the prisoner
sprang the length of his chain, upset the
wheelbarrow, and swore if the man didn't
take hold of the case and clear him, that
he would follow him from the house and
drink the last drop of his hearts blood. This
decided the matter at once and the proud
sprig OF arisiocracy felt that his own life as
well as that of his client depended upon the
amount and quality of forensic ability that he
could bring to bear upon the jury. On his
rising to address the court, the presiding
judge Indignantly informed him that no col
ege baby with coat on would be permitted
to speechify in that Temple.
The Jersyman took of his fine broadcloth