The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1862-03-14

tn, aforesaid oil was being rapidly distribut-
ed, about half an inch deep, over the whole |
of the floor.
Just at this moment in rushed mother, Sis,
and the governor,who had heard my unlucky
tumble, and thought that l had hung myself
and the rope had broken, or that something
else equally horrible was to pay.
oh, James what has happened? was the
cry-when up went their heels, and down
went the old lady on one side, and sis on the
other, and the governor end over end over
them both, all into the thickest part of The
half gallon. Dire was the confusion during
which L left. This was my first experience
on parlor skates.
After months practice, however, l got SO
l could 60 along nicely by working well with
my shoulders and swinging my hands about
considerably, although l wiu acknowledge
that never could stand on my right leg and
look at my coat tail under nv elbow, as
Jones had done, without sitting on it before
could obtain single glimpse of its fair
proportions
Winter was now at hand. Araminta had
presented me with gorgeous skating cap
l had reciprocated with a splendid pair of
skates. We were engaged. l looked for
ward with rapture, not unmingled with anxi-
ETY., to the time when l should guide her
lovely form through the slippery paths of the
learner of skates.
At last came hard frost: up went the
red ball, SO did the price of skates. l start
ed home early that day, designing to fortify
myself with good dinner before making my
essay as an instructor. Who should l meet
in the hall but Araminta, wrapped, and bum
died, and shawled, and cloaked, looking so
large that was appalled,. She is onlyl two
inches taller than am, but in the dim light
of the hall she looked huge. The doubt
which had been haunting me all summer
broke out again, and though ht, with a cold
shiver, what if l shouldn't be able TO hold
her?
The idea was SO unpleasant that l hasten
ed to change the subject.
'Araminta, my love- tenderly inquired
why are you dressed? :? 1t is two hours be-
fore the time appointed. Come in TO din
ner.'
Never mind dinner. l have Just had
lunch, and don't want any, and l know
shall die if don't 90 skating at once. !
have Teen waiting since one o'clock, and we
must start right of. You don't care for d:n-
ner when you are taking care Of me, do YOU,
James, dear? So get yoar skates and hurry
please
What could l DO? couldn't say l die
f want my dinner after that, although felt il
, my innermost soul that such was the fact.
yielded, and to the fatal compliance trae
r all my subsequent misfortunes-for mar
without his dinner is no man at all Th.
. fumes of the dinner were gently waited ou
| of the dining room, but in vain. Slowl,
and sadly l ascended to my room. / had on
ly time to don my skating apparel, pocket ,
, pistol heavily charged with old Bourbon, and
. half choke myself with a cracker, before
r Bridget knocked to say that The young lady
wished ME to hurry and l had to start
, of, melancholy sacrifice to woman's ca
, price.
Just as We got into the street, sis came
running out, apparently in great haste, and
called me back.
James, said she, please be careful 10 re.
, move all the oil cans from the vicinity be-
fore you commence skating. That's ALL
Good bye
oil cans" said Araminta. what can she
, mean?'
Sure enough replied, blushing, never.
. theless. up to the roots of my hair, what can
: she mean" Notwithstanding, knew what
t she meant and swore vengeance.
Before had fairly realized the importance
Of this discovery, (which did not take a mo-
ment to find out.) had returned in front of
Araminia, who was arranging her manifold
draperies preparatory to start. Designing
70 produce profound impression, l struck
| with assumed carelessness, graceful atti-
tuGe l had spent some time in acquiring on
: my parlor skates. Indeed, on them, could
l do it first rate; for by putting the knees 10.
= gether and pressing the feet little outward
t you can maintain almost any position You
may desire. But alas! l was speedily re.
4 minded that l was standing on something
: very different from parlor skates. Just as
: Araminta looked up with an admiring glance
putting the final touch upon her multitude
!, nous apparel by that indescribable twitch
, with which ladies always announce them
, selves as ready and exclaimed, in tone of
: rapture, 1sn't it heavenly l felt my leg:
! slowly receding from each other, and started
, off sideways on their separate and individual
5 responsibility. murmured beautiful Al
, the same time making frantic effort tc
/ bring them together, with no more effect
' however, than if they had belonged to differ
: eEt persons. Parlor skates only roll back
E wards ard forwards, and a side movement
not coming within the range of my previous
: experiences, found me wholly unprepared.-
y NV feet slid off further and further apart and