Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1862-04-17

had nothing to do but mind Jones and not
get excited. Suddenly an idea struck me.
The directions were to keep the floor smooth
and my skates creased. Here was a chance
to do both Oh is the cheese, thinks and
in about five minutes, with the help Of a
broom, the aforesaid oil was being rapidly
distributed, about half an inch deep, over
the whole of the floor. 'ta
Just at this moment in rushed mother,
sis, aud the governor, who had heard my
unlucky tumble, and thought that had
hung myself and the rope had broken, or
that something else equally horrible was to
payy;o -, ,.,,
the cry-when up went their heels, and
down went the old lady ON one side, and sis
on the other, aud the governor end over end
over them both, all into the thickest part
of the half gallon. Dire was the confusion,
during which left. This was my first ex-
perience on porior skates.
After month practice, however, got
SO | could go along nicely by working well
with my shoulders and swinging my hands
about considerably, although will acknow-
ledge that l never could stand on my right
leg and look at my coat tail under my elbow,
as Jones had done, without sitting on it be-
fore L could obtain single glimpse Of its
fair proportions.
Winter was now at hand. Araminta had
presented Inc with gorgeous skating cap
had reciprocated with a splendid pair OF
skates. We were engaged. | looked for
ward with rapture, not unmingled with
anxiety, to the time when | should guide
her lovely form through the slippery paths
OF the learner of skates.
At last came hard frost; up went the
red ball, SO did the price of skates start
ed home early that day. designing to fortify
myself with a good dinner before making
my essay as an instructor. Who should /
meet in the hall but Araminta, wrapped, and
bundled, and shawled, and cloaked, looking
, SO large that was appalled,. She is only
two inches taller than am, but in the dim
} light Of the hall she looked huge The
doubt W hich had been haunting Inc all sum
mer broke out again, and l thought, with a
l cold shiver, what if | shouldn't be able to
: hold her2
The idea was so unpleasant that hasten
, ed to change the subject.
"Araminta, my love-" | tenderly inquir-
cd, why are you dressed? 1t is two hours
!, before the time appointed. Come in to din
Il ner."
"Never mind dinner I have just hat
q lunch, and don't want any, and know
i shall die If ! don't go skating at once,
/ have been waiting since one clock, an(
, we must start right off, You don t care fo
$ dinner when you are taking care of me, d,
r you, james, dear? So get your skates anC
$ hurry, please.
o What could do? couldn't say dit
e want my dinner after that, although fel
: in my innermost soul that such was the fact
e yielded, and to the fatal compliance
trace all my subsequent misfortunes-fo
man without his dinner is no man at ALL
t The fumes OF the dinner were gently waftet
out OF the timing room, but in vain. Slowl,
d and sadly ascended to my ROOM ha,
II only time to don my skating APPAREL, pock
/ ct pistol heavily charged with old Bourbon
1t and halt.choke myself with a cracker, be
n fore Bridget knocked to say that "Th,
ls young lady wished me to hurry" and ha,
+ to start off, melancholy sacrifice to VIC
y man 5 caprice.
n Just as we got into the street, sis cam
y running out, apparently in great haste, an
ii called me back.
James," said she, ''please be careful t
N remove all the oil cans from the vicinity be
De fore you commence That's ALL Good bye.
"Oil ns!' said Araminta, what Ca
e. she mean ?"
Il "Sure enough" I replied, blushins
~ nevertheless, up to the roots Of my hai
ir "what can she mean?' Notwithstanding
. | knew what she meant, and swore Vol
lis geance.
#, Before had fairly realized the impor
ance of the discovery, (which did not tax
'l- moment to find out. l had returned.
or front of Araminta, who was arranging hi
to,. pta
lly Designing to produce profound impression
- full attitude l had spent some time in a
ed quiring on my parlor skates. Indeed, Q
them could do it first rate /; for by putin
IN the knees together and pressing the feet
little outward, you can maintain almost al
position you may desire. But alas l W,
les speedily reminded that | was standing {
go something very different from parlor skate
ou just as Araminta looked up with an a
:, miring glance, putting the final touch upt
ID, her multitudinous apparel by that indescl
bable twitch with which ladies always a
ng nounce. themselves as ready" and e
ng claimed, in a tone of rapture, "Isn't
,ht heavenly ?" felt my legs slowly recedil
on from each other, and starting off sidewa
pse on their separate and individual respon
out bility. / murmured beautiful ~ At d
see same time making frantic effort to bri
! them together, with no more effect, ho
ever, than if they had belonged to differe
wn persons. Parlor skates only roll backwar
lalf and forwards, and side movement q
ide coming within the range Of my previous G
wn periences, found me wholly unprepared.
the NY feet slid off further and further apa
Int and Istretched and stretched to accompa
bell them till actually every bone in my bo
put seemed to ache, but no avail. The hum
tier frame is not pair Of compasses, and
Q it found myself obliged, when my feet w
em some distance apart, to tumble orsplit.
,ht, / tumbled. OF course, the moment tou,
the ed the ice | Immediately commenced to
,ur- my skates. Indeed, | have no recollection
ent ever seeing any one tumble who didn't co
ok. mence to fix his skates 1t is a singu
lrd! circumstance, but almost exactly the sa
AN. thing may be seen on the road every day
eels A gentleman will be observed passing eve
and body at 2. 40 gait and everything is allIig
ght but, when he reaches some one who sta
hat after and passes him in 2. 80, something
q mediately happens to his harness, oblig
r. him to pull up into corner of the fence Q
cad FIX it ! This Is d curious coincidence,
red which | acknowledge myself wholly una
ner- to account.