The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1862-02-22


tary expectation OF deing shot
F" You will fire, gentlemen, simultaneous
iy, when l give the word" said tn,
captain. Then, in an undertone, to th'
doc or, Quick, the pistols.
4 Why, what the devil"
whats the matter? !? asked the captain
striding up Cant you find the caps =
"Duce pistol or cap, but this r'
/ He held up-a lady's night cap!
/ Look here-and here-and here :?
holding up successfully hair brush, q
long, white pight-gown, a cologne bottle
and a comb.
/ They were greeted with long whistle
by the captain, and blank stare by the
two principals
Confound the luck" calculated the
captain; it we haven't made mistake
and brought the wrong valise!'
The seconds looked at the principals
Nobody volunteered a suggestion. At last
the doctor inquired, s
well what's to be doueY'
I'D unlucky" agaid calculated the
! captain g The duel cant 60 on"
Evidently not, responded the doctor,
i'' unless they brain each other with the
hair brush, or take pop at each other
with the cologne bottle
You are quite sure there are no pistols
in the vaise =? said one of the principapals
with suppressed eagerness, and drawing a
long breath of evident relief.
We mustigo over to the city and get
pistols, proposed the captain.
"And by that time it will be dark" said
the doctor
I'D unlucky," said the captain again
We shall be the laughing stock of the
town, consolingly remarked the doctor,
" if his gets wind"
''One word with you, DOCTOR here in.
terrosed his principal
They conferred
AT the end OF his conference with his
principal, the doctor. advancing TO the
captain, conferred with him. Then the
captain conferred with his principal
Then the seconds conferred with each
other Finally, it was formally agreed
between the contending parties that a
statement should be drawn up in writing
whereby principal No. l rendered the as
surance that the offensive words t. y ou are
liar were not used by him in any per-
sonal sense, but solely as ali abstract pro
position, in a general way, in regard to
the matter of fact under dispute. To
which principal No appended kiS state
ment of his high qualification a; this
candid and honorable explanation, aud
aualiheGly withdrew the offensive words,
i" Gu are scoundrel they having been
used BY him under a :nisapprehension of
the intent and purpose OF the remark
which preceded them.
There being no longer any cause for quar-
rel, the duel was OF course ended. Ths
principals shook hands, first with elch
other, and next with the seconds, and were
evidently very glad TO get out Of it.
"Aud now that il is so happily settled,
said the doctor, chuckling, and rubbing
his hands, it proves to have been lucky
mistake after all, that We brought the
wrong valise Wonder what the lady that
owns il will say when she opens ours and
finds the pistols
&" Very well for you laugh about growl
ed the captain; but its no joke for me to
lose my pistols Hair triggers-besf- Eng
lisiI make-gold mounted. There aren't
a finer pnfr in America
! "Oh we'll fad EN-. Well go OF Pill
grma,e from house to house. asking if
any lady there has lost ni2ht-cap and
found pair of dueiliug pistols"
In very good spirits the party crossed
the river and Inquired at the baggage
room in reference TO each and ali black
leather travelling bags that arrived that
day, took notice of where they were sent.
and st out to follow them up In due
time they reached the Continental. aud as
lu' K would have it, met the unhappy
bridal pair Just coming down stairs in
charge of the policeman.
= What all this ? enquired the captain.
oh, couple OF burglars, caught with
a vali>e full OF stolen property"
" A valse what kind Of a::valise p
a black leather valise That 5 1t there
Here stop halo policeman =
landlord Its all right You're all wrong
That is my valise It's all mistake
They got changed at the depot This lady
and gentleman are innocent. Here's their
,alise. with her night cap in it
Great was the laughter, multifarious the
comments, and deep the interest of the
crowd in all this dialogue, which they ap-
peared to regard as a delightful entertain
ment, got up expressly for their .amuse-
ment.
"Then you say this ere is yourn p said
the policeman, relaxing his hold on the
bridegroom and confronting the captain.
Yes its mine.
And how did you come by the spoons?'
"Spoons. you jacknapest said the cap
tains Pistols !-dueling pistols
Do you call these pistols 2 said the
policeman, holding up one of the silver
spoons marked ct B.
The captain. astounded, gasped, "It's
the wrong valise again alter all
stop. not so fast = said the police func
tionary, now invested with great dignity
by the Importance of the affair he found
himself engaged in. If so be as how you
have got this ere lady's valse, she's all
right aud can 60 But, in that case. this
is yourn, and it comes on you to account
for them ere stolen spoons. Have to take
you in charge, all four of ye'
: "Why you impudent scoundrelf T. roared
the captain; )" II see you in--.-I wish l
had my pistols here; I'd teach you how to
insult gentlemen shaking his fist
The dispute waxed fast and furious
The out sie,efs began to take part in it, and
there is no telling how it would have end
ed, had not an explosion. followed by
heavy fall and scream of pain been heard
in an adjoining room.
The crowd rushed to the scene of the
new attraction. 1
The door was fast 1t was soon burst
open and the mystery explained Tie
thief, who had carried off the captains
valise by mistake for his own. had taken
it up to his room and opened it to gloat
over the booty he supposed 1t to contain,
thrusting his hand in after the spoons
In so doing he had touched one of the
hair triggers, and the pistol had gone off,
the bullet making round hole through
the side cf the valise, and a corresponding
round hole in the calf of his leg.
Tie wounded rascal was taken in charge,
first by the policeman, and then by the
doctor; and the duellists and the welded
l. e. 81, 81 e
their mutual mishaps, which eliminated
in a supper, where the fun was abundant.
and where it would be hard to say which
was in the best spirits,-the captain for
his pistols, the bride for getting
her nj sh t.can the hrldeIroom for escani n o