Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-11-15
A Clergyman's Joke.

was Spending the night in hotel. in
Freeport, Illinois After breakfast. | came
into the sitting-roum, W here l met pleas
ant, chat'y, good-humored traveller, who,
like myself, was waiting for the morning
train from Gaiena. We conversed freely
and pleasantly on several topics. until
seeing two young ladies meet and kiss
each other in the street, the conversation
turned on kissing, just about the time the
train was approaching Come" said he,
taxing up his carpet-bag, "since we are
on SO sweet subject, let Us have prac
teal appl cation iii make proposition
to you. I'll agree to kiss the most beau
titul lady i'll the cars from Galena, you
being the judge, If you will kiss the aexr
prettiest, being he j1dge" The prupo
sition staggered me a little, and could
hardly tell whether he was in earnest or
in fun; but as be would be as deep in il
as | could possibly be, | agreed, provided
he would do the first kissing, though my
he~rt tailed Inc somewhat MS | saw his
black eye fairly sparkle with daring -
Yes" said be, "Pll try it first. You
take the back Car, aud go in rom the
front end, where you can see the faces of
the ladies, and you stand by the one you
think the handsomest, and I'll step in
from behind and kiss her"
had hardly stepped inside the car when
I saw at the first gls nee one of the love
Hest looking women my eye ever fell on
A beautiful blonde, with auburn hair, and
8 bright, sunny face, full of love and
sweeti ess, and as radiant aud glowing as
the morning. Any further search was
totally unnecessary | immediately took
my stand in the aisle OF the Car by her
side She was looking out of tie window
earnestly as if expecting some one The
back door of the car opened and in step
Ied my hotel friend. | pointed my finger
silly to her, never dreaming that he would
dare to carry out his pledge; and you may
imagine my horror and ainazemeut when
he stepped up quickly behind her, and,
STOPPING over, kissed her with relish
thar made my mouth water from end to
end. | expected of course a shrek of
terror, and then row generally, and Il
knock down; but establishment succeeded
establishment when saw her return the
kisses with Ion. pound interest.
Oh k As fl ash he turned to me. and
said, - Now, sir, it is your turn" pointing
to hideously ugly, wrinklet old woman
who sat n the seat behind "Oh, you
must excuse me. you must excuse me!' |
exclaimed. Pm sold this time. | give
up. DO tell me who you have been kiss
ing"
well" said he, "since you are man
of 50 much taste, and sucn quick percep
ton, I'll let you off" And we all burst
into general peal OF laughter as he sand,
" Tits is NY wife | have been waiting
here for her, | knew that was a safe pro-
position" He told the story to his wife,
who looked ten-told sweeIer she heard il.
Before We reached Chicago we exchange
ed cards, and | discovered that nv genial
companion was a popular Episcopanan
preac er OF Chicagv, whose name | had
're quently heard. Whenever | go to Obi
cage | always 60 to hear him and heart
Ter, more natur l. and more eloquent
preacher It is hard TO fad He was then
but young man: he is now well known
as one of the ablest divEes of the Eplsco-
pal denomination in the West.-Hagper's
Monthly.