The southern aegis, and Harford County intelligencer. (Bel Air, Md.) 1862-1864, 1862-12-13

thlS was CaDDyneG COuncll AYE,
SEES he, what's up?" "Wel," ses Lin
KIM we want to know the condishin of
your department. ?" ses he, "E amt mil
itary Ginneral, an amt got command of
no department The old man warnt
fairly awake yet; ses Seward, ses he, 81
guess III have to give him another
pinch "Now," ses the Kernel, "that
reminds inc of story. An old Dominy
down in Connecticut used to have very
sleepy congregashin One day, wen
good many were asleep, he stopped rite in
the middle Of his sermon and called out
deacon Giles, sing the 10th Psalm, to
the tune of Old Hundred The Deacon
commenced and sung one verse. Wen he
got thru, the Dominy yelled out the top of
his voice, Sing another verse, Deacon;
they amt all awake yit.'" Vile all
hands were laughing at the Kernels story,
Mr. Bates got putty wide awake, and sed
that his business had got sorter mixed up
with Stantin's, and in fact there warnt
any courts or judges or juries now, an
nifty little need Of Atturney Ginuerals-
the Ginnerals were all of another kind. He
sed wen the war was over he meant to rite
out a legal opinion agin it, but be was
Altered it wouldn't be loyal TO do it now,
and so he spent most of his time in read
ing bound volume of the Christian AL
manac, which he hadzfor forty years back.
He thought the country was in a very
prosperous condishin, for he drew his sala-
ry regular.
After he got thru, the Kernel called on
me to make sum remarks, but [ telled him
81 didn't cum there to say enythiug, but
only to listen, an to see eff | could larn
enough of what was goin on to complete
the message" They all set IN then, espe-
cially Seward, an sed / must give my i'm
preshins, eff nothin more. "Wal," [ tel
led 'em, "ef I sed enything | should be
jest as blunt as pump handle, an they
mustn't take no offence an that so far as
I was construed, might jest as we'll go
to a singin school to larn to dance as to
have cum here to find out enything about
the state of the country. Every one of
'em seemed 10 be thinkin about himself,
an nothin about the country. Because
they drew their salary regularly, an had
enough to eat and drink, they thought mo-
body was hurt. / telled 'em that l guess
cd they all had on "Gorifcation Specta-
cles,' and that everything was magnifAd
to 'em. Then [ sed that jest what the
Kernel wanted to know to put in his mes
sage was, how many sojers' we had, an
how much they were costin.; an how
many sailyurs we had, an how many ships,
an how much they cost Then [ teled
EN- that the people would like to know
how many poor fellcrs had lost their lives
sence the war begun how many had been
crippled, &c, &C.; an how much the debt
would be after we go all thru an finally,
what great good We had got by it all. Here
Chase sp Ike up SEES he, "we'l establish
freedom au restore the Union" "Wal,"
SEES |, ''cf you want four millions of mig
gers to AXE keer of, you're welcome to
'em, but as for restorin the Union by war,
so far, its jest been like climbin CREASED
pole; as fast as you climb up you slip
back, an ses I, it will be so TO the eend of
the chapter unless Tine mistaken " SEES
Chase, sys be, "thc Majer is disloyal." p
Wen he sed that I jumped rite up with
my hickory, an ses |, "ain't your name
Salmon p SEES be, Eyes" "Wal,' ses
I, sit won't be long if you don't take that
back" never see teller look so scarf.
SEES he, "Majer, l didn't mean eny offence,
ain so I'll take it back, for l think you
mean we'll l telled him "that [ didn't
allow eDybody to say or to intimate that [
warnt friend to the Constitushin and
the Union"
The Kernel here spoke up az sed that
his Cabbynet was good deal like old
Josh Pendleton's boys out in lower Hi
noy. They alters cum hum every New
Years to see the old man an have talk
of old times, but afore they got thru they
alters had regular fife. So he thought
he'd adjurn the Cabbynet for fear there
would be a scrimmage here.
Then they all took their departure, an
the messigc amt no nearer done than
ever. The Kernel an have set up mite
after pite, an drank old rye, but it is no
use, we can't get it in ship shape FORM
The Kernel ses he guesses he will jest get
the messige out in rough an send it into
Congris, an let Sumnure, Chandler, Love-
! Joy an Thad Stevens lick it into shape.
i Yours till deth,
j MAJER JACK DOWNING.