Delaware State journal and statesman., 1862-11-04
.sss.
FROM rue Alhlnu
TOO SOON.

TOO SOON
Permit me to say a word or two upon the
other side of the against being Too
Soon.
This is social error, to which Tompkins is
dreadfully addicted. would sOlemnly warn all
women about to marry to ascertain beforehand
that their contemplated husband s not what is
called Fidget leaning towards lntempeI-
ance may be greatly miigat in usband by
ones keeping the cellar key, and not allowing
him any pocket money; but IL lanaticsm for
being always before the time, it is difficult to
repress, aud impossible to extirpate. Better
that bridegroom should not be al the church
door until after the rubrical hour, and your mar
riage be postponed for day, thnn that he sh luld
provo himself u Fidget by presenting himself ut
the altar before clergyman or yourself is ready
for him. Your srt.loye may suggest that such
haste is ouly the result OF his eager 1 yot Oh :
but do not deceive yourselves, yuung women, he
would have been At the church equally enry it
it had been to bury you. Tumpkins himself is
in many respects an excellent husband, aud DO
believe is very Dad Ot me; but il is 1imeliness
first aud Feelings af sfwards with him, | know
When ,usiuess calls INN on journey, only one
eye drops tear at parting with his wife and
offspring the other is fixed upon the clock, 10
see that the cab is sent for in lime to catch the
train That ''catching the tram is the thought
which makes him thin and keeps him so. Much
Of his time is OF necessity consumed in travelling,
but not nearly so much as he spends in prepara.
ton for Lis journeys. The dny previous TO un
expedition is mainly occupied in packing his
carpet bag and writing out his direction labels
lie caves overnight, as in will, the most elaho-
rate irections for the proceedings Of the next
morning, with a codicil, appointing that he shall
be allied half an hour earlier than he ut first
cor sidered soon enough. This last command is
wholly superhnous, SINCE h. always wakes Of
himself long before the appointed hour and pro
c eds to ring the house up. Previous to this,
he has kept me from my res, since earliest dawn,
by perpetually getting out If bed to see whether
it is going to be fine Upon this depends the
momentous question: Shall he take his water
proof coat or nOtI ii he does il should he
strapped up ut once with the other things ALREADY
lying on the hall table reaiy for departure-no
u moment is to be lost Ills toilet is haslS
enough, but not speedy for in his eager desir,
on retiring to rest to have everything ready fol
the morning, he has general, packed up hi
brushes and comb, or some other indispensable,
thing which hns 10 be dsentonited from tht
portmantcau. lie generally shayes overnight
hut it not, tremble for his throat, since knoy
with what imprudent lapidity lie is performing
that operation in his dressing room
"Gcorgina, MY darling, stckiag piasier Their
ant although am pretty sure it only refers Il
his being behindhaud, aud not to u frightri
hemoIrhage demanding M immediate stypic
une really needs to have nerves Of iron
Presently his door spens, an hear his voic
over the banslers; jane, my Jooisi Wher
ars my Joetst What: No, they're not in M
room; they're nothing Of the kind Ask Susai
Coniodnd that glrl, WHY is she Hlways taking ~
boots away Shes like a magpie, Where ar
my boots ?"
After the one domesti, hui solemuly declare
her innocence Of this abduction, and the othe
haa called witnesses to prove that She took mas
ter's boots up, cleaned, the night before accord
lug to orders, IN order to save time in the morn
iAg hear TOmpkins observe in very coucili.
tory tone that they need never mind, lor that
doesn't matter-the fact being that he has actu
ally Ind the articles in question on his feet dur
ing the whole of the nltercatlon- lie had though
It would hasten matters to put them on at one
instead Of his slippers, aud then had forgot Ii
had done so. But Jane, adds he, "tell coo
that I'm ready for breakfast. Isn't the brsnk
iast ready 1t oayht to be yes, it ought
tell you that Kitchen clock is sl0w-irs yer
slow"
do not generally descend myself on these oc
caslons, so that cannot sny what actually take
place at Tompkiha breakfast but know it
Il very hurried one, M like Chinese religion
ceremony, accompanied by continuous ringing Q
bells. All this is OF course not punctuaity
but what is il? The English language (beiu
framed by the male) has plenty of such terms a
dawde aad diatory, but no expression for b
no means uncommon vice which is not only ba
iniiselt, but eusnaring to others. Let me call i
then, Too sOon-ism. This is, il seems. a hcred
tary malady. Tonpkins,s htther was Athlete
with it and moreover, his mother presente
hiln to the world several weeks before his ad
vent WAS expected. 1t is no wonder, then, an
scarcely blame 70 him. that ToosoOnism iutluer
, ces my unhappy husband III his manner !; but
is serious calamity to me. My very amuse
inent5 ere embittcred to me by reason of th
hurry that accompanies thsm. TOmpkius and
aIe always the hrst people within the. walls
the opera or theatre AS soon as the doors al
open. aud It'll not unusual for us to arrive be
lore they are open. TAen We have To- sit 10 gu
: hrouehm gorgeously apperelled, while the shar
ana wicked street boys speculate muicousl
upon the bird flom which my ostrich featht
was taken, or us to whether the carrage is ou
own, or a hired vehicle
suppose hAYe heard more iwAnging Of Gl
. dies md footing Of flutes than any woman alive
1t ia one thing to be in time for the overtur,
but II is quite ano lher TO come in for the tunn
Of the orchestra. On the other hand, there
uobudy who has had less opportunity than my
self oil listening to the sublime strains Of the nu
tional anthem. Long before the conclusion
the piece, IOmpkns is figetng to be away i
order tha' We may have "the carriage brougl
up at once" or because 'tO- O-mOrrrow is Sunday
my love, remember !" or because Tomorrow
not Sunday, aud he has to be up preternatura
early, 10 order 10 be at some office in the city
at IL. protest that, often as have seen "Doi
Giovanni" have never yet beheld the ghost
scene and though have watched Queen Katha,