davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1861-1862, 1862-01-06

u,ted by the meanest and most selfish motives and Mr.
lincoln is content he cannot deny tha; have hth
erto done right to express suspicion that we did so
for reasons we cannot a<ow without shame II is not
wonderful that notice of fori n relations begun in this
spirit should end in the exhoratioa with which
already familiar in The circular of Mr.. Seward TO forty
the escoss. the great lakes and rivers After all says
Mr. L'ncolu "the safety and stability of the Republic
depends foreign nations, but upon ourselves y
That is perfectly true at this moment because foreign
nsons earnestly desire peace ard TO avoid all occasion
Of quarrel but will to be true the moment that
RIGA has forced us in:O war, for Of the many
evils Of war is that nation s deprived by Of the con-
troll Of m own desinies and forced TO shape its course
not by its own WILL but by the Geosion Of war itself.
OPINION oP THE REPORT og sLCRLTARY WILLIS.
Tie Blockade Rail,rs aud hs "Stone Fleet" Crime
against the H,oasR Kind
tPror, the Ionson Times Dec I'm
Daily Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1861-1862, 1862-01-06

The English iunds have been quiet to-day C9:h,) and
the market as been free from the numerous rumors so
prevalent du-ieg the week and shich 1t is uHnassry TO
particularly advert 10, az they die as soon as they are
bora To, sljiea departure OF General Scott from
Paris for America to which some importapcs fast
atched said not to be connected with any pOiti.
cal movement the veteran Generals Cbec: being onlg
10 retura 20 tbi country from sense ot duty. The Ie-
ported mediation OF King Leopold in TIE American diff
cliy al fail d to produce any effect |. being pretty
vel uadeIs,ood that nothing will satisfy the goyernm ent
and q r'ion at large bu! the surrender Of hessrs Sill
Daily Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1861-1862, 1862-01-06

> = BsiS PURE oIDEE vISEaAR in store snd sale by
= -. oc2s ". n. PLEAsAST5.
QTpES.Erer R. Pipes ait-xe beauiifa .oi for ISLE
q Do. DOVE 90. Wh'laiss D-lgrrg dec
y lEMcVAI.-E)sioND Davenport co have reuo-.
I'd hss one corner Gary ,ai ian s.rest' STAR dsl6
l.tFEiNR.-ipI sides Russ3.i Leiihrr; 81 iies Black
- Types Leather 10 js Kip Ssh 10 side. N nch Cali skal
CH consignment, Ard for GALE ~
-6C HUNT JAMES
PS.t5 eases pardaes quarter bcxss just recy
> 81 aud ior sale by AJysY LiP3OOMh no2
CtGNOEhT FEAT EsD LYg.-sA lot Of he above. at
~ dollar per box f0r sale By
nos Jas p nUyAL
pHg received Tarty bashs ysry Me rye and Tor
4 fa,e by T. A. T. OABaEY,
nO2J Cor. tn and Broad Streets.
Daily Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1861-1862, 1862-01-06

II ~ hVECE arEG.-t Ilt o. sellas havana C.gsra,
A.goy l-e, o. ls.a ty ~. rlrElsJN CO., jas Main
s.-rHs dra
NE AND WIZ e-tE OATS stlrc a -upr.or l1t
= rv. lnI .Ht.r os1 Pr ss-L Tlase wasunz sgpsror
AEleishsi better can soon. Gzosds WATT co. sells
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

upon the egg which their wisdom had
hatched, and pronounced it q good egg.
Chose him Of his chief men two,
whereof the like were not to be found
no, not in all the North, and in the
South was not their equal.
Whereof tbs first was 4 Mason, the
like Of whom was not known, not i'll
the land of Huram Of old, nor among
the Hittites or the dwellerS by the sea.
For he was like unto q turkey cock,
stuck up and Of excessive pride, spread
ing himself and strutting vehemently
from the rising of the sun even unto
the going down Of the same inetfably
great in his own conceit, swelling in
vanity, puffed up like bladder, even
nigh unto bursting.
SO that the little ones in the market
place cried after him, Big Injun, heap
big !"
And the other was a little New
Yorker, even q renegade Of the North,
one who had backslidden from the way
of his fathers, and that right ill
Wherefore he was called Slide-ill.-
1lOW UClU SOlic Gel ilitu Iiili ClN bSai,
from his dealings both with cards and
with men.
But it came to pass that they called
him Slidell, forasmuch as he was one
who naturally took the whole ell ,wheth
er one gave him an inch or no.
Now they packed their trunks, and
took unto them Eustis' and many 9th
ers equally talented and important.
Not forgetting their wives, neither
their man servants nor their maId sery-
ants, their wines nor their cigars.
Howbeit they took not with them
the bonds Of the Confederacy, lest the
Paris shop-keepers should say, Go
To-, it is naught ;
But divers eagles and dimes, stolen
aforetime from Uncle Samuel, took
they Likewise bills of exchange and
circular letters Of credit upon certain
Of the Jews.
And so they went down unto the sea
in sh;ns--cven in steam ship-sailing
to the HAVANA, where she was unload
cd of her burde7..
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
CHAPTER VII.

Now it came to pass years before,
and was on record,
That Mason, having been asked to
visit Boston,
Replied, 'Verily, verify I say unto
YOU that | will not set foot therein again
save as an ambassador to that land
Now these things were remembered
against him, and printed in all the pa
pers, even in the Boston papers print
ed they them.
And they bare him into prison, with
Slidell, and poor Eustis too was borne
Of them.
And they seemed exceedingly wam-
bIe-cropt and chop fallen; their feath-
ers shone not, even their sickle feath-
ers dropped in the dust, and til cir
combs were white.
And they seemed as unclean men
caught in neir unrighteousnsss, who
had been sold uneommonly cteap, with
nary buyer.
Aud they took from them the gold
which they had stolen afore- time from
Uncle Samuel, even the bills upon the
Hehrews did they yield up. Howbeit.
they received receipt for them.
And they asked much, How shall
we feed, and may we have servants :?
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
ND RAPIDS. WISCONSIN.-SATURDAY FEBRU AIRY /, 1862

and wished to live pleasantly; yet
when at Richmond, Slidell had reviled
the Yankee prisoners sorely, and coun-
seled harsh treatment.
Then went they into the jug, and
were allotted each man his bunk in the
prison house.
And the word went forth to hang all
pirates and robbers on the seas, even
as it had been spoken sternly by Old
Abe, Of Washington:
Saying. 'String them up in short
order.
And if they Of Secessia hang the
brave Corcoran and his friends,
Then, as the Lord liveth, Slidell
and Mason shall pull hemp; even on
the gallows shall they hang like thieves
and murderers the land hath sworn
it, Selah.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
CHAPTER VI.

Now it came to pass at the end Of
the first day that they saw the Trent
in the BermudaS, even in the channel.
Then the brave captain sent OH board
Lieutenant Fairfax which in the Morse
tongue is Hartagcr or Fair Haired ;
since it runncth in the family to be sea
kings, and brave on the ocean.
And he, mounting the ship, cried
aloud, Where are thcy:'
Then the Englishman replied, L
know not whom ye secN 10, they are
not here!'
Then he, seeing Mason a little apart,
cried, 10! here he is
And Mason, hearing this, turned to
the color of ashes; his knees smote to-
gether; he became even as boiled
;uvkey-cock there was no soul left i'll
him.
Yea, even his collar wilted, and the
stock of his heart went down ninety
five per cent.
sIIowbc he said with Slidell, We
will not 60 save we be forced.
'Then,' replied Fairfax, shalltake
you by force.
SO they held council together and
resolved to go.
But their wives and little ones they
sent on 20 Europe, and gave instruc-
tons to poor Eustis.
Bidding him go in when /, should
rain, and be sure and put up his UNI
brela if he had one.
Likewise t. bear certain documents
promptly and speedily to the kings and
princes.
Which Wilkes hearing, he speed
ily smashed, taking poor Enstis with
the papers.
This was the end of the counsel of
Trent. 1t was not that great counsel
Of the name, but a very small one, and
which came to nothing-small potatoes
and few in hill. Selah
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
CHAPTER V.

For there vas valiant captain, q
man of war, hating all iniquity, even
as poison.
And his name was Wllkes-honor
and praise to it in all lands !
Captain Of the San Jacinto, cruising
for pirate on the high seas, even for
Sumpter.
And he came from Africa, even from
the East unto the Havana, in an isle
of the sea which lieth under the tower
of Moro;
Where he heard from his Consul
strange news, saving that Mason and
Slidell had sailed in British steamer,
even the Trent, which saileth between
Vera Cruz, Havana, and St. Thomas.
Their said the captain, Shall | re-
frain myself to stop this iniqulty?
Arise, oh my soul; grid thyself and
60 forth tarry not, but nab them in
their wickedness.
Take them where the hair is short ;
jerk them and pull them even as fan
cy policeman pulleth the pickpocket
when he seeth him picking the pocket
Of the righteous.
Shall | hold back my hand when
my country calleth? Not if | know
it. 4SeIah
up steam and after them, oh my
soul; let there be coal under the boil
ers, oh my heart let the way in which
we shall travel be caution, faster than
Flora Temple, or any other man.
Fling forth the stripes and stars
hoist the rag, thou gallant sailor go
it as strong as it is mixed. For the
spangled banner in triumph shall
wave Ger the land of the free and the
home of the brave
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

by beat about tor shadows OF eXcu-
ses to prevent emancipation from be-
ing accomplished by the necessity of
war? All other "nilitary necessities"
are gladly recognized, and speedily
made available; but this-the greatest
necessity of all-the very key to unlock
all our applications-thrust into the IA
ces ofour ministers and generals at ev
cry corner-they dare not take hold of.
SO it is.
This fear of meeting squarely the is
sue of slavery which is so squarely pre-
sented to us, and the desire to post
pone the settlement Of it to some future
time, is positive proof that we do not
regard ourselves as equal to the res
possibilities Of the occasion. We are
like the bankrupt merchant who dares
not examine his books, and endeayors
to find relief from anxiety in vain eff
forts to imagine that bis liabilities are
much less than his fears have binted
and his books prove.
have understood that some mem
bers of the Cabinet were once opposed
to slavery, and desired to cripple its
power. 1t is not likely any other ad
ministration will have presented so fair
an opportunity for donig the decd
1t may never so occur again for the
strain on our institutions now will
weaken them so, that with slavery
maintained intact, another rebellion
will destroy them utterly. The policy
now will be precedent the next time,
and precedent fortified by such laws
as the slave power will be enabled to
enact in her behalf if she comes out Of
this war having won, in addition to the
former conceded constitutional guaran
ties, the still greater guaranty or CON
cession that Of all the institutions and
interests in the country, 1t alone Is sa
cred and exempt from the contingency
Of military necessity and martial law
With this point conceded by the only
Administration ever elected on anti
slavery grounds, the 'Epeculiar institu
ti0nn will come ont Of the war stronger
than ever before, unless this peculiar
policy Of the Lincoln Government is
overthrown or defeated. Slavery nev-
cr asked SO great concession before,
greedy though it has been hey ond all
reason. and this one granted, how can
the Administration make any stand
against its other claims? Indeed the
aIacrity and ''cheerfulness" with which
this point was given up, is regarded
as a pledge that the Administration
will to the last extremity stand by the
abomination, and it is I good pledge
that the border states will take good
care shall be fully redeemed. When
the next "adjustment" is made, the
good faith of the Administration will
be invoked by the HoIts and Prentices
and CarlIes Of the border states to
make good Moir promises to the Union
men Of Maryland, Virginia and Ken
lucky, and these promises amount to
fall protection to slavery in all its ex
trcme demands. To yield, the Admin
istration has already prepared the way;
and the end will be that we have
fought, Impoverished the country,
and come out Of the war saddled with
the Breckenridge platform and inter
minahle taxation
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
CHAPTER ".

Now it came to pass when Uncle
Samuel heard of these things: he was
sorely riled yea, his wrath was like
unto six story stack of wolverines
and ld-cats, mixed with sudden death
and patent chain lightning.
Howbeit he lost no time, and tarried
not to take q long swear over the bu
siness.
But sent forth his ships:
Sending likewise Thurlow, whose
surname was Weed, to prevail over
Mason and Sly deal, and come vitrol
over their vinegar.
But when the people heard Thurlow
say, l 90 indeed to Europe, but not
on this business-Slidell may slide for
aught [ care
Then the multitude winked one I'M
to the other, so that such terrible wink
ing was never before seen.
Exclaiming, 'Oh, yes-in a horn.-
We knew it not before, but now we
know it for certain
And q certain Simeon, whose sur
name was Draper, stood up IN the mar
ket-place and wagered that Thurlow
would pull the wool over Mason, and
humble him;
| And there were no takes. .Slah.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

WHERE TO LAY 1T oN.-A CORES
pondent Of the New York Tribune
suggests the following basis Of taxation
for the support Of the war for the I'm
ion:
!. \ Poll Tax Of one dollar upon cy-
cry voter in the United States, those
only to be exempt from payment who
are in the service of the United States.
2. a tax of twenty five per cent. up
on the gross receipts for fermcnted or
spirituous liquors, to be collected from
wholesale dealers upon their sales, and
from retail dealers upon their sales.
This would have the effect Of giving
the Government nearly half the re-
ceipts of tho entire liquor business in
the United States. This should be col
lcctad by agents appointed especially y
for the purpose, who should require all
liquor dealers to make oath in the
amount of their monthly receipts, and
in case any dealer should refuse to
make oath, they should have the pow
er to tax him until he should comply
with the conditions Of the law.
3. The same rates Of taxation should
be levied upon tobacco, and should be
collected in the same way.
+. Assess a tax of one hundred and
fifty millions upon the property in the
States. Let it be apportioned upon the
same valuation which is the basis OF
the State taxes in each State, and let
each State be allowed ten per cent.
for expenses Of collecting.
). Lay tax upon all railroads OF
onc-fourth Of q cent per mile for ri
passengers carried by them.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
Fact, Fancy and Fun.

The greatest truths are the SIM
plest; and SO are the greatest men.
Grimes sometimes shock II. too
much vices almost always too little.
Why are women like beets? Be-
cause the younger they are the sweet
Difficulties and strong men, like
strap and razor, are made for each 9TH
er.
We sever what God has Joined.
and so destroy beauty and lose hold of
truth.
The king is the least independent
man IN his dominlons-the beggar the
most so.
Be what you are. This is the
first step toward becoming better than
you are.
-Respectability is thing that ma
ny people are very willing to run in
debt for.
We can only know ourselves
through the constant study how to gov
ern ourselves.
If man cannot argue without
swearing and cursing, his discussions
are too cusory.
Poverty is like panther; look it
sternly IN the eye, and it will be likely
to turn and flee.
Goldsmith SAYS woman decked
out in all her charms is the most terri
bic object in creation.
-Gluttony is as common vice As
drunkenness man sinned in eating be-
fore he did III drinking
If your divines are not philoso-
piers, your philosophy will neither be
divine, nor able to divine.
--Grecly calls Bennett "a lying old
braggart' and Bennett calls Greely
''galvanized old squash"
He who cannot forgive others
breaks bridge over which he himself
will one day want to pass.
The intoxication of anger, like
that Of The grape, shows us to others,
but hides lis from ourselves.
1t is ascertaincd that one-third of
all the horses purchased for Govern
menC are diseased or condemned,
-Selfdepreciaticn is not humility,
though often mistaken for it. Its
source is oftener mortifie d pride.
When you go to drown Yourself,
always pull off your clothes that they
may fit your wife's second husband.
How few are our real wants and
how easy it is to satisfy them! Our
imaginary ones are boundless and in
satiablc
w ordsworth cautions studious
friend against "growing double" but
the girls think it is the best thing
nice young man can do.
Most men work for the present,
few for the future The wise work for
both for the future in the present, and
for the present in the future.
There is farmer ia Putnam coun-
ty, New York, who has a mile of chill
dren-His name is Furlong, and he has
eight boys and girls. Eight furlongs
one mile.
Many man Las lost being a
great man by splitting into two mid
ding ones. Atone yourself to the best
Of your power; and then Christ will
atone for you.
IF the man who has got to the top
Of the hill by honesty is ashamed to
turn about to look at the lowly road
he travelled, he deserves to be taken
by the neck and hurled down again.
If a boy loves reading, reward
him with a plaything; if he loves sports,
with q book. You may easily lead
him to value present made thus. and
to show that he values it by using it.
The reason why the Vermont and
New Hampshire boys are SO tall is,
that they are in the babit Of drawing
themselves up so as to peep over the
mountain to see the sun rise. 1t is
dreadful stretching work.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

~ Have you heard Of the fellow
who ran aboard steamboat at st.
Louis, with an order for a passage on
the "Missouri % s'This is not the
Missouri, sir said tie captain
"What? 'taint the Missouri % "No,
sir, it is not" "What do you have it
printed on her for, then?' eve don't
have it printed on her, SIR" "You
don't. What do you call Mercury.
II that don't spell NJ issouri, I'd like to
know what it does spellS'
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

! THE SONG OF REJOICING.

THE SONG OF REJOICING
Now when the ambassadors, and
they which bore the words Of the king,
had sailed,
Lo, there was a great rejoicing in all
ScccSsia-therc was naught heard save
the voices Of renegade Northern edit
ors ! Cor that the Southerncrs know
not to write,
Saying, sCome, let us be glad ;
,angh, O thou soul.
For they have gone, they have cs-
capped, they have got away, they have
lodged, they have cut stick, they have
vamoosed the ranch.
They have ripped it full chisel, they
are off licketty split, they have slid,
they have made tracks, they ha' miz-
zled, they have ab&quatll'ated and clip
ped it; dJitt, erasit, er1pit!' Hurrah
for us
Lo, the Yankees are brought low
the nasty, mercenary, low born, infer
nal mud sills are defled, and become
as vain thing. Gloria !
For our messengers are on the high
seas; they are 0. X. they shall deliv-
er us from the pit. Victoria.
They will drive things chuck to the
hub in q slasher gaff style; nnr foes
shall become even IS dead birds in the
pit they shall be euchercd and dis
counted, and we will rake down the
pot
Come, let us take drinks, for who
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
CHAPTER II.

Now jefferson, whose surname should
have been Brick, but that 1t was not,
seeing that it was Davis.
Saw the counsel that it was good.
And having seen it, aud set his eyes
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01
Chronicles Of Secessia.
From the Continental Monthly.
CHAPTER T.


Now it came TO pass in the first year
of the great Rebellion.
In the land of Seces5ia, whose men
were men OF Belial, hard of heart, and
infamed with exceeding great wrath
against the children of the \ North, and
against all people who walked in the
way Of truth and justice.
Meditating evil from the first mint
iulep before breakfast, even unto the
last nip Of corn whisky before retiring:
In the isles Of the South, and on the
firm land where CoTToN was king, and
JEFFERSON, whose surname was DA-
Wis, was his prophets; where Benja-
min, the finder of stray watches and
spoons, and Floyd, the spoiler, were
rrinets-Oh, my soul, enter thou not
in.o their cOunselS
A great and vehement cry, wall
ing and roaring as Of many Of the chiv-
airy when they burn with strong drink
1T quarter races, or smitc with bowie
knives in free fight around court
house.
The cry Of many women and chill
dren, TO say nothing of editors, politi-
clans, dirt-eaters and negro auction
GERS:
Saying, Lo! these many days have
We been closed up by the Yankees, ey-
en- like INTO pint of Bourbon in an
exceedingly tight corkcd bottle. so that
nothing NAV 90 out or in, and who
slall say what may be the end thereof?
Since the blockade nresseth sorclv
u,on onr norris thn rch,ndisc of ma
Nv lands cometh not therein, and we
are entirely out of groceries.
sIIayinr neither balm nor myrrh
u,;,aa ,,ar toa rnt,no nnr brandy
n,,;n;n.. !. nnt o,,ong rs nn;thnr
l.,.. ,.n l.hn,,o slnne surar lack
I',,;,,a. ,.i,.,rs ,,3nni ra,I;.inos nIno
....,.,,,y ans Fro,ch Gloves mems or
49, -...s* nor raisjns.
.....n.lino sc,rae for 10 t,
...... :, cTrerlin~,v rao.
.... ... ~n;,n. .,.,,: toe;
at >,r:,,,s ;,o,tS
,..:. ........,.. an,gnu MS who
l'.,,n.,, ..r.,n.I, f. o,,k. th,. first n,n-
,,;,Ja ~ =, hraT,u
~, ~, tl,9,,,, tl;,o,s ,,.o,.o ,,.da ~,
.s..1 NV v.,,7,ao,, .f,.,, Tina
nran v;nro fhr I,ys of orr fathers and
+o,> ,,ro,l 9, d.fla orr hands
'.;,t .,,,.l, h,so l.,b,r
sshou v,n foo no os dogs colh)ino
u,oos nr 90 liza haathen Who sell raj.
trans nnlale milk pals. and keep
Thppnl hp' -; yinr9
TO-, the L;nos of the earth sec rs
with Scorn those who sit in hioh pla-
nas ,ral, tbc;r hoaas and sav we are
,anaht vno nolIntcd in our inherit
n"na ~
,n1 ~, 7ymcs will 1crl,rr flat wn
:, :, a.hos. avnn thc Nonit.,lr will
sa,. that we 1avonr dnst anl the Zei-
S's 'c way w E,r,,,.nr ovo, thn nrnss
"r'I" e 10, pL;i;*t;nns vii nrnrlaim th,,
VI wa nno ,,ttnrl,, f,llsn
%ow Io+ tharo he lono null .
wv ,,,,iI ond mil aItoacthrr o
,,o"7 ..I' H. hns;,oss
~ w. t',,1 ,hara Va ,r,,,sso1,rs-m Of
s,btlo tonrnc runninr in counsel
I1.a,, - ro forth vco Let them be
,io ;o5 !, 7f;on raimant b,vinr bran.
ro.+s 70 confer honor unoD MS
@ ,,,;,,, socrntorio. and assistant sccreta.
Wv" s,,L sonrotor;es and dpnntv-ossist.
,os' s''b ,"o socrctor;es -cycn these bav-
inc their servants and servants serv-
,,dorI;nr onl 90 on al ;o41n
it,ln
sAnd we. albeit poor, will lavish
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-02-01

"A troubled conscicnce.-Thet tooth.
ache Of the mind.