The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1862-05-17
A ROMANTIC DREAM.

Time: 10 o'clock at night. Place a pale
lighted room in the End story of Store
House in EIkton, Md. Business caucus
meeting Present: some 6 or serious
countenances. First speaker, Mr.. Smoothing
| Iron, who commences thus
| "Gcntlemen, have some very grave sub
jects for your consideration. Firstly, what
action are we to take respecting this indi-
vidual called Cheap john And twicely.
what will be our condition if he goes on the
way he does, exposing our cxtortion And
three .timesly, if something is not done soon
there will he ro use for more than about two
stores in Elkton, besides Cheap john"
Up jumps Mr. Leather No,s in great haste :
GO Nh. Smoothing Iron, agree with you per-
| fcctly. ! have been trying for the last two
months to run down both Cheap John and
his Goods to all intents and purposes; but
find the people see that John is bound to do
| right, and they are determined to support
! him.
| AT this jnncture all countcnances began to
assume wild hue. Up gets Mr.. Greasey-
| Face:
I Mr.. Chairman, / should like to know
what Mr.. Leather Nose means by the word
right p Sir, do not see the point ; that
man Shall come here and cut down prices
about one half, and do all, or nearly all, the
business in town l can't see it, nor any
man."
After this M. Slysnoo-lc gets up:
8. And can't see the point, either, Mr.
| Chairman. think Mr.. LIS sympathy with
Cheap J ohm is rather too knotty Tor me to
swallow. ] always had Il friendly feeling for
yon, Mr.. L.; but | wish you to understand
that's played out now. Why the thing speaks
for ITSELF use to get 80 per cent more for
every thing sold than Cheap John sells the
same goods for, and in some cases so per
cent more, and how | can hut be down on a
man that does that l refer to you al''
Next speaker Mr.. Rakemdomn:
! g Gents, wish to be distinctly understood
on this grave subject. In the first place,
am down on Cheap John like load of toad
frogs, and all people who take his part, for
consider that suffer more than any one Else
by this cutter down Of prices. Why use to
get any price | asked, but now | shall have
to sell below cost to compete with Cheap
John, and why Mr.. Leather Nose can take
his part am at a loss---'
AT this moment Mr.. l.. Jumped up:
6. Mr.. Chairman, | consider this crowd is
all down on me, because ! take Cheap Johns
part. Now. Mr. Chairman, will tell you
why take his part in the first place he
knows how to buy and sell goods better than
any other man in the State of Maryland, and
in the next place he has style about him
| 'iiat hc'ci OIL" III any Otncf man. W Nv he
manufactures his own Clothing, Boots and
Shoes, Brushes, Backing, Indigo Blue, and
imports his own Threads and Cutlery en-
poys ladies' in his store to wait on ladies'.
lie commences business at the right end
He pays Cash for every thing, and sells all
for Cash, and that is the only right way to 10
business in any part Of the world, and if
Cheap John wanted partner would be the
first man to apply. Now, Mr.. Chairman,
these are my reasons for sympathy as you
call it, with Cheap John''
At this junture up jumps all hands, all
speaking at once.
81 move, Mr.. Chairman, that Mr.. L. be
expelled from this honorable body.''
"Agreed ~ says all bands.
Mr.. L., " | will leave if you call this an
honorable body. Good night 20 8.
Going out, MIR. Il. was heard to say, "Well
| have had the conscience ache for long
time. thank God can now sleep at night,
something have not done for long time -
just at this moment awokc from my long
and tedious dream, and found myself lying
on the broad of my stomach, with my mouth
wide shut, and my right foot hanging out of
bed and chlntzcs playing checkers on my
big toe nail.
GT-I have now the largest and best Stock
OF Goods of any Store in Cecil county, and
can sell the Cheapest, and my goods are all
paid for.