davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
COurtship in Hard Times

The following story of an English MR.
chants courtship vi hen business was r'press-
ing" may serve as an example while timss.arc
so very "hard:"
"The lady called at his countng-houss and
said that her businss was to consult him on the
propriety, or otherwise, of her accepting an
offer of marriage which she had received.
New, for the first time, occurred to the mer-
chant the IDEA ofthis holy estate in his own
care. Marriage, said be, listsssly turning
over some Vest India correspondence. Well,
suppose every body ought to marry, thoue h
such a thing never occurred to me before.
Eave you given this gentleman an affirmative
answer, NO Are your feelings PARTICULAR
ly engaga3 in this mattei?' Not particularly.
Well. then, madame, said he turning round
on his stool, if that be the case, and if you
could dispense with eourtship, for which I
I'VE no tine and think you could be comfor-
table with me, am your humble servant to
command There were some people who
thought the lady had purpose in going there;
but if so, she prudently disguised it. She said
she would consider the matter. The merchant
saw her out with the same coolness as if she
was one OF his Correspondents, and wheE she
was gone five minutes was once more INNER
sed in his letters aud ledgers. A day or two
after he had a communication fem the lady
Accepting his offer, very considerably eIcus-
ing him from an elaborate eourtship, and leav-
ing him 10 name the most convenient day.
They were married"
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
NUMBER 48.
mit ano 6un,or.

The DANDY AND THE BARKEEpRR. -
At hotel the other day, young and
fully moustached dandy from certain
city, was seated at the teatsble at rather
late hour, when the barkeeper came
in, and sat down directly opposite to
him. The dandy droped his knife and
fork, tipped back his chair, gazed at the
bar-keepsr and exclaimed:
Fsllah, do the servants sup with the
gentlemen in this house?
No sir, was the reply.
Are you not the bar keeper?
Yes sir.
Well, bar-kseper is help as much
IS the scrub girl,
True, replied the man of the toddy-
stick, but 1 did not enter the hall until
looked in and seen no gentlemen at the
table.
RkoI,! !
Here the conversation ended. Nous
tache was fixed
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
Histelluneaus.
But lie is a Gentleman ,

Not long since VS. chanced to hear
short dialogue between mother and
her daughter who had just arrived at
the age of "swect SIXTEEN" on the pro-
priety of associating with certain indi-
vidual who was not named but whom the
mother seem anxious that her daughter
should shun From what we could learn
from the conversation it seem the indi-
vidual in question possessed proposes
soin extorinr-drcssed well-was famil
lar and affa;l in maners, and managed
to keep up his head in what is termed
good society," in consequence of bis
winning ways" but who was, never
,hclcss, heartless depravcd wretch
debaucee, and a notorious gambler
1t was after these qualities of the man
had been portrayed by the anxious
mother as u warning to her inexperienced
daughter, that the artless girl exclaim-
ed, as though she had hit upon reason
that more than outweighed all her
mothers objections: "But he is a gen.
tlemau'
The words struck our minds forcibly
nor will the honest simplicity with which
they were ut cred be soon effacsd, "B, t
he is i gentleman What then ? Why
these cannot be viccs-a gentleman
would not practice any thing which is
not proper. is the conclusion to which
the uusophisticated girl at once arrived.
How much misery how much disappoint-
mcnt, how much overwhelming sorrow
and regret has this one short sentence
caused the world? How many heartless
Williams arc there who move even in the
best circles, and whose characters are
known 30 be Infamous, who yet hold up
their heads for no other reason than be-
cause they are gentlemen-that is to say,
they possess the erterior Of gshtlemen,
comely person, affable mnnners a good
suit of clothes ! How few are there, es-
pecially among the young, who look be-
yond these accomplishments in forming
their estimate cf character Let man
be ever so corrupt, let his character be
what it may. if he possesses these little
external accomplishments, it will not
answer, under the present condition of
society, to censuro him, "for he is gen.
tleman." But let female wander from
the path of socioty-yes. let her even be
suspected of it, though she may be ever
SO charming. this grand salvo, but she
Is lady," will not be sufficient to cover
her filling. Such certificate will not
sustain het-she must be consigned to
disgracs and infamy. In what consists
the difference -? What is that men can
practice with impunity what will not be
tolerated in other sex :? That there is a
false standard of gentility Set up in So
ciety, there can be no doubt. That
good old maxim Of Pope, that worth
makes the man." has gone out of vogue,
at least with large portion of society.
OF else different standard of north has
been set up, which is to measure a mans
worth by the quality of the clothes he
wears, or the grace with which he bows.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

PENSIONS .-Applications for pensions
continue to come in daily by huudrods.
AlreEdy over four thousand applications
for invalid pensions have been received
by the commissioners of Pensions, and
about five thousand applications for Wild
owls pensions. Up to this date abou
six hundred applications for invalid pen.
sions have been granted; but Of widow
pensions smaller number have been al
lowed. owing to the unavoidable difficult
ty and delay in obtaining the necessary
evidence, &c, from the Adjutant Cen
erals Office.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

That which thou has to do. do it with
al! thy might. said clergyman to his
son one morning
so l did this morning. said Bill with
an enthusiastic CLEAN in bis eye.
'Ah. what was it darling?' and the
father ran his fingers through his off
springs curls.
Why. wholloped Jack Edwards.
said young hopeful till be yelled like
blazes. You should have heard him hol.
Ter. dad
The father looked unhappy while be
explained that the precept did not apply
to any act like that, and concluded mildly
with:
You should not have done that, nv
child,
Then lied awallopcd me- replied Tie
young hopeful.
Better. said the sire. for you to have
fed from the wrath to come
Yes. but, replied the hopeful, by way
of final clincher, Jack can run twice
as fast | can
The good man sighed, went to his
Studies, took up pen and eudeavorod
to compose himself.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
The Distress In England.

The distress in English cotton dis
tricts continues to increase, and directly
effects all classes of the community. The
few mills in partial operation are gradu.
ally stopping work. and it is estimated
that by Christmas there will be 7S0, 1000
paupers to be fed in Lancashire alone
At a recent meeting in Blackburn it
was stated that in twenty-four Poor Law
Unions the number Of people receiving
relief was 1872, ,682 more than in the cor.
responding period last year. Of the
population Of Preston, amounting to SO,
900 persons, 1900 were at last ao-
count in receipt Of relief from various
scources. OF the sighty-ssvsn mills Of
Preston thirty-four are shut up altogeth.
or, and in those still open there are now
but 1881 working full time; 1 /, 1876 are
working short time. (nearly two-thirds
on three days a week. and 12.13O are
altogether out of employment. Besides
these, it is calculated that at least 1900
workmen connected with or dependent
on the mills. but not reekoned among the
hands, are also out Of employment In
Wigan 10000 are absolutely dependent
on charity for subsistence. In one week
preceding the departure of the last steam
er, total Of 1000 paupers were added
to the list previously rseeiving relief,
and in twenty unions in the nighborhood
Of Manchester no less than 200, 900 per-
sons were on the relief lists. The Amer
loan war. however, is not the sole cause
of distress. Recent unexpected supplies
of cotton have arrived from India, but
there is no ameioration sof prospects o.
the poor. The manufacturers do not q
vail themselves Of it, from the fact tba
the markets Of the world have been o.
yer stocked by the excessive productions
of former years, and, until the supply
is exhausted, there can be no marked
improvement. To the capitalists tn.
war is source of profit, it enables them
to realize on their stock of goods.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

TIE DRAFTED MILlrA-The necessity of FL
ling up the old regiments in the field, has ell
icited new order from Adjutant General
Thomas, through the recommendation Of Gov
ernor Curtin, by which the drafted militia
have the privilege Of volunteering in the old
regiments, either in companies or squads, un'
der their own selected officers.
This order also requires all substitutes here.
after employed to enter the old dregiments on be-
ing accepted and mustered into service. This
must be distinctly understood by those who
intend entering tho army az substitutes.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

INTERESTING TO FARMERs.-The commission
er of internal revenue at Washington has been
asked the following question::
as the farmer who sells cider-brandy which
is distilled from aPples-the product of his
own farm-required TO obtain a license? In
other words, is cider-brandy, obtained under
the above conditions, a farm product" He
replied that--"oider. brandy cannot be con-
sidsred farm product, even if made for the
farmer who furnishes the apples, and cannot
b sold without license It would seem
from this that not barrel Of cider brandy y
can te sold by anybody without d license.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

A contemporary oommsnds the follow
ing statement, copied from an old num-
Der of the Edinburgh review, to that
portion Of the British press which snsers
at our present national currency:
1.-The notes Of the Bank of England
wero, in 1872. at an average discount
20f; in 1878. of %; aud id 1914, Of 25
per cent. tits estimated also that two
hundred and forty private banking COM
panies became wholly bankr upt during
fhe years 1915 and 1916"
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

PosT OFFICE ScENR-Havs you any
letters here for my boss
Who's your boss
The one that I-work for
What is his name. you idiot?
'Robett Brown, sur"
There's none here for him."
1t amt for him, but I wants it. Iti
letter for myself; but I axes for him
bekase his name is better known than
mine.'
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

When you hear a woman exclaim, "Oh
what fool was to reject so many low
ers and take up what I did !" be assured
that she married the first man who made
her an offer. doing more than half tue
courting herself; and that many d time
her en-pocked husband wishes she had
rejected him.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

know | am a perfect bear in my
manners, said young farmer to his
sweetheart. No indeed, you are not :,
John; for you know you have never hug
ged me. You are more sheep than
boar,
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

A club Of benpeoked husbands met
once wesk-thst being their only day
of enjoyment and rest. When they ad-
journed they called it tho rising of the
tied.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

A country couple. newly married,
stopped at the Gibson House. in Cincin-
natl, few days ago, and the groom cal
led for some wine. When asked what
kind he would have. replied: 1--WE
want that kind of wine where the corks
pop out and liquor boils up like soap.
suds."
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
Buetiral.
Mrs. Lofty and l.

MRS. LOFTY keeps a carriage,
So do I;
She has dapple grays to draw 1t,
None have l.
She's no prouder Of her coachman,
Than am |;
OF my bue-eyed laughing baby,
Trundling by;
hide his face lest she should see,
My sherub boy, and envy me.
Her fine husband has white fingers
Mine has not
He could give his bride palace,
Mine cot;
Hers comes home beneath the starlight,
Ne'er cares she;
Mine comes home By twilight,
Kisses me,
Aud prays to Him who moves life sand,
To hold the loved one in his hand.
Mrs. Lofty has her jewels,
SO lave |;
She wears hers upon her bosom,
Inside /;
She will leave hers at deaths portals,
BY and by;
| will bear my treasures with Inc,
When | die:
For have love, and she has gold;
She counts her wealth-mine can't be told
She has those who love Lrr station,
None have /;
But I've one true heart beside NE,
Glad am ];
I'd not change it for kingdom,
No not I:
God will weigh it in the balance,
BY and by;
And then the difference He'll define
Iwxt Mrs. Lrfty's wealth and mine.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

Prentice says "a chap sometimes comes in
our office and sirs hour after hour without tel
ling one word oftruth during the whole time,
Hs can ontsit hen, and outlie the Devil"
He must be one Of The telegraph reporters for
the Associate Prsssd.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

A Western Girl, aftor giving her low
sr hasty smack, exclaimed: "Dog
my cats. if you havnt taken little rye
old hess.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

Follow the law of Nature, and you will ne.
yer be poor; your wants will but few. Fol.
low the laws of the world and you will never
be rich, you will want more than you can
acquire.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

Lowell has over nineteen miles ol
girls endwise.'
"Whos been measuring EN- endwise.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27


ment.
Advertisements sbeforeMarriages and Deaths
10 cts. per line for first insertion subsequent
insertions, S cents per line. Mine words are
counted as a li:e III advertising.
Merchants and others, advertising by the
year. will be charged Sl2 90.
Proceedings of meetings not of a general
character charged al cents per line for each
insertion.
Yearly advertisers must confnt thsiradter-
Using to their own business:
ALL TaAxsiESr ADvERrisiSu, cash in al
vance.
PersonsorleTi!q he.hser,ion oflegaladver-
isements will he held responsible for pay
ment for the same when the time for which
they were ordered to be inserted shall have
expired.
issoLvrsr yorrcss, cash {. y advance.
PATENT Medicines one half in a6vantrSnd
H. ? balance in six mon tbs.
All Jon WORK. cAgH.
Tie lossei we have sustained Comral usto
adopt this course It will he strictly adhered
10 n all cases, and no advertise nnent will be
inserted unless accompanied by the caRh.
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

When did Rosecrans make the rebels
snseze? When they came to the Hatch
eo
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27

Lazines, travels so slowly that power
ty soon o1ertakes her
Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1862-11-27
Giuilian \ Grlfgrapb
IS PUBLISHED
Every Thursday Morning.
w. EVANS, Editor and Proprietor.
Office in Second Story of Brooks Block,
Balto St., near the Bridge,
Rates of Advertising.

One square OF IL lines, ST. for three inser-
insertions rs cents each.
All advertisement tsun nd er 2 lines charged as n
square.
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21

Don't you remember The cid tom-cat. John Smith,
The old tom cat whose notes were high,
As he used 10 serenade each night John smith,
When the stars were bright in the sky?
Down ny the old Niagara's shore John Smith,
Where the elm stands silent ard lone,
Some naughty boys threw in the river one day,
The old tomcat att ached to a stone.
Dou't yoa remember old Tower. John Smith,
Old Tower WHO belonged to Bill Gale
Aud how many times in our childhood sports,
We have tied oy ter to his tail
Old Tower would have lived with Sale, John Smith
Until he had grown hel, less and old,
But they caught him stealing sheep one night,
Aud old Towers tale was soon told.
Don't You remember the old pond John Smith,
And the bridge across built OF log~,
And how many times We have TODD on the bridge.
And pelted with stones the poor frogs?
The bridge and pond are gone. John smith,
And things are changed that view.
But ind no change III my pocket, John Smith,
Could borrow dollar of your
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21

SHERMAN on SUMNER.-SeHator Sherman
(Republican) of Ohio, in recent speech,
thus expressed his views in regard to Sum.
ner's reasonable resolutions which have
received the approval of the Republican
organs in this State:
81, therefore, cannot help but say that,
while | respect the motives of the honora-
ble Senator from Massachusetts,, while
give hm credit Tor consistency, ability and
great deal of culture, and am always glad
to hear him speak, yet | must confess that,
when | looked over his resolutions, they
struck me with surprise and regret They
would revofutlonze this government Sir,
strike the States out of this system of
government, and your government is lost
and gone. | cannot conceive of the Unit.
ed States governing colonies and provinces
containing millions upon millions Of peo-
pie, black and white. do not think such
a thing can exist. do not believe it is in
the power of secession to bring us to such
a state of things. lean draw no distinc-
tons bet,eeen the resolutions Of the Senator
from Massachusetts, and the doctraaes that
are proclaimed by J.terson Daris. If a
State can secede, the people of the State
can make new government. If the pro-
pie of South Carolina are firm and united
IN their policy, which no man doubts if
they have power to secede; they have Sc
ceded, and their doctrine is true But
do not believe they have the power to SC.
cede. They may go in Punishment, wan
dering all over the face of the earth, but
they cannot take with them a sinrln fnot of
the SOL of this country over which our flag
ever foated The doctrine Of the Senator
from Massachusetts is substantially an ac-
acknowledgement Of the right to secede-
He, however. puts the States in the condi-
ton of abject Territories, to be governed
by Congress. jefferson Davis puts it in
the power Of the people of the States to
govern the States themselves. As to which
is the most dangerous or obnoxious doc
trine, leave every man to determine"
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21

A SARCASTIC Hlr For fear of accidents
on the railroad, the stampeded Congress
left yesterday in number of the strongest
and newest canal boats. These boats are
drawn by mules of approved sweetness Of
temper. To protect the stampeders from
the snakes and bull frogs that abound along
the line of the canal, Gen. Winder has de-
tailed a regiment Of ladies to march in ad.
vance of the mule and clear the tow path
of the pirates. The regiment is armed
with pop guns IF the largest range. Tho
ladies will accompany the stampeders to
secluded cave in the mountains of Hepsi-
dem, and leave them in charge Of the
children Of the vcinage, until Mcclellan
thinks proper to let them come forth
The ladies return to the defense of their
country. Richmond Whig, April %,
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21

STOPPED WORRYING AND BEGAN To
LAUGH.-A clerical friend, at a celebrated
watering place, met i lady who seemed
lowering on the brink Of the grave. Her
checks were hollow and wan. her manner
listless, her step langud, and her brow
wore the severe contraction so indicative
both of mental and physical suffering, SO
that she was to all observers an object OF
sincere pity.
Some years afterwards he encountered
this same lady, but SO bright, and fresh,
and youthful, 50 full Of healthful buoyan.
cy, and so joyous in expression, that he
questioned himself if he had not deceived
himself in regard to her identity.
at is possible" said he, THAT see be-
fore me Mrs. B., who presented such a
dole'ul appearance at the Springs several
years ago?'
The very same"
And pray tell me. madam, the secret Of
your cure. What means have you used
to attain such vigor Of mind and body, to
such cheertulness and r.juvenation ?"
"A very simple remedy" returned she,
with beaming face, 81 stopped worrying,
and began to laugh that was all"
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21

ANSWER THEN --Bide patiently the end
less questionings of your children. Do no.
roughly crush the rising spirit of free inqui-
ry with an impatient word or frown, nor
attempt, on the contrary, long instructive
reply to every casual question. Seek rathe,
to deepen their curiosity. Convert if possible
the careless question into a profound and
earnest enquiry. Letyour reply send the lit =
tie questioner forth not so much proud Of
what he has learned, as anxious to know
more. Happy, thou, if in giving your child
the meleculc of truth he asks for, you ca.l
whet his curiosity with a glimpse of the
mountain ottruth lying beyond; so wilt thou
send forth philosopher, and not silly pc.
dant ints the world.
The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1862-05-21
WHOLE NO. 292.
Terrible Cat Fight.

On the dim wood shed, in an alley dark
where scattered Loonhcams sitting thro q
row of tottered chimneys, and an awning
torn and dropping fell, strobe back and
forth, with stiff and tense drawn muscle
and peculiar tread, a cat. His name was
Norval; en- yonder neighboring shed his
father fought the cats that came in squads
from the streets beyond Dupont in scarci,
of food and strange adventure.
Grim war be courtcd and his twisted
tail, and spine upheaving in fantastic curve,
and claws distcnded, and ears fatty press
cd against a head thrown back defiantlv,
told Of impending strife. With eyes
agleam, and scrceching blast Of war, and
steps as silent as the falling dew, young
Norval crept along the splintercd edge, and
gazed moment through the darkness
down, with tail awag. triunphantly then,
with an inprecation and a grow, l,--perhaps
an oath, II direst vengeance hiss ed, d,-he
started back, and hooked his body like a
letter S, or rather like letter g inverted,
stood in fierce expectancy. Twas we'll -
With eyeballs glarns, and ears all aslant,
and open mouth, in which two rows of
iangs stood forth in sharp and dread con-
tormity,-slow up post from oat the dark
below, head appeared.
A dreadful tocsin Of determined strife
young Norval uttered then, with face un-
blanched, and moustache standing strait
before his nose, and tail flung wildly in the
passing breeze, stepped back in cautious
invitation to the foe. Approached the
other and with preparation dire, each cat
surveyed the vantage Of the field. Around
they walked, with tails upifted, and backs
high in air. while from their mouths, in ac.
cents kissing consuming rage dropped brief
but awful sentences Of hate. Thrice round
the roof they went in circle, each with eye
upon the foe intently bent; then sidcwisc
moving, AS is wont with cats, gave one
longdrawn, terrific, savage yiu and buck
led in! The fur few a mist of hair
hung Ger the battle field. High 'bove the
din Of passing wagons rose the dreadful
tumut of the struggling cats. So gleam-
ed their eyes in frenzy, that to me, who
saw the conflict from window near,
nanght else was plain but fiery stars, tha,
moved in orbits most eccentric.
An hour they struggled in tempestuouS
might, then fainter grew the squall of war,
until all sound was hu>hed. Then went
forth with lantern, and the field surveyed.
What saw -?
Six claws one ear-of teeth, perhaps IA
handful, and, save fur, naught else except
a solitary tail That tail was Norvals.-
BY ring | knew't The ear was-but we
let the matter pass. The tail will do
without the ear.