Cedar Falls gazette. [volume] (Cedar Falls, Iowa) 1860-1895, 1862-10-24

forgotten to take out the rammer, which
must have hit the COW. and, probably disa.
greed with her-which piece Of eak of the
size Of the instrument in question would be
very apt to do with most any one. aa
l never saw man 20 mad 20 the deacon
Was in oil my days. ID. r
He was q religious nan and would net
swear but he consarned eur pictsrs," and
"gaul darned" around the edges of the
Second Commandment till it seemed that he
would miscalculate bis distance and knock
it " end-wise" before he got through but he
restrained himself and rcfrained, though the
temptation was sore. -@, ~a& .
We did not say much, because we did not
wish to hurt his feelings, especially a. hs
was over six feet high, had pitchfork long.
er than himself, and looked as though moth.
ing would give him greater pleasure than to
test its virtue upon us. a-a. sd ..
bv promising to pay all damages, and wen-
ded our way-not quite so jolly ~ before.
By.and-by our friends place came in sight.
On tho lawn, which sleped gently down to
the river, sat his two charming daughters
Coward whom both Billy and myself had
cast the sleeps eyes Of affection) sketching
and admiring the beauties Of natu, 80 partic.
ularly that portion Of 1t which occasionally
waved something white from the passing
steamers.
We went into the little cove in front o.
them like rocket, Billy at the helm, the
boy at the cannon to salute and look out for
shoals, and Jones and standing over on the
winaward gunwals in the impressive atti.
tudes Of graceful negligence, so as to display
our uniform to the best advantage, and to
be ready to agitate our cambrics on being re-
cognized. -, ..-.. -.
The girls saw 10 and saluted. '
4" Fire ~ roared Billy. "Why in thunder
don't you firs" -a 81. -
"Cuss the thing r. replied the boy, whom
our previous performances had rendered
rather nervous, it won't 70 offr'-trvinp
as he spoke, again and again to set it of. =
But it was literally no CO." which. con.
sidering the fact that no priming had been
used, was not such . surprising circum.
stance. '...
In the absence Of the "cannon's roar" we
waved our hats d we stood on the gunwale
and gave three cheers. 81. osEa3
Up with your hellum r. cried the boy,
suddenly interrupting the I" tiger" which
ought to have followed 'look out for mud
fats r. .....
Billy who had insisted on taking the
position Of steersinan to enter, took the wsrd
a p'sd de lettrs, and forgetting that our tillcr
only moved sideways, gave q tremendous
tug upward, which instantly unshippcd the
whole apparatus. - -, :
The breeze swung US around on mud.
bank the boom flew over. heard sharp
"smack," and experienced sensation across
the frightened part Of my pants that remin-
ded me strongly Of my childhood there was
q splash, and Jones and found ourselves
struggling in the briny deep, without the
slightest 'ntlmation Of how we got there.
Ihree feet Of water---two feet of mud
And such mudi Not the ordinary solution
that patience aid clsthesbrush will remove
out . black, tenacious, mortar.liks compost.
ton only to be found near tho metropolis
that stuck and smelt like all possessed. :
Falling overheard under any circumstan.
css is unpleasant; falling overheard in the
presence Of the mistress of your affections,
even when there IL danger, is ridiculous
but falling overbsord where there is no dan.
ger, and coming up, all bedaubed and be
piastered, looking like the King Of the Can
nibai Islands, or free soiler escaped from
sur Southern brethern" before they have
had leisure to finish their labor Of love in
their usual artistic manner, is depressing to
the last extent. .
We got to the boat and held q council of
war. That something had got to be dsns
if not sooner, was a. self.evi
dent as the axioms of the Declaration of In.
dependence (about which, BY -thc-by, no two
people out Of dozen ever yet arreed.)
That the boat was aground, the wind had
lied away, and the tide going out, was too
plain for dispute. There was no alternative
but to get overheard and shove. - -
We could not take Of our precious uni.
orms. because there were the girls: SO il
was with mighty long faces that We got
over and tugged and pushed with all eur
strength, to make the agony as short a. DOS.
,ible; but inasmuch as the tide went s;r
eet in precisely the time it took us to pro.
pei the boat that distance, II was At least an
hour before she foated in the channel.
And sweet-looking party We must have
lPpcareo when We got there; not enc of US
'ut had been under severals times, and b.
ng the shortest, had in one instance rot
stuck to such an extent that it was necesss.
y to Pry me out Of the mud, with On oar,
ike an overgrown oyster. III a-:.gr
In the meantime those girls did nothing
'ut sit on the bank and laugh. 49,.
How they did laugh II showed, at any
ate. that their health WAS perfect; for no
me with the most remote tendency to pul.
nonary affection could have made the noise
hey did. ..I.''-.s. = 7'-'-'''"''' '''''
AZ there was not breath of air, the only
hing that could be done on getting around
ne point WAS to anchor, and piously whistle
or breeze.
II was kissing hot, the sun pouring d.wn
With forty horse power; its beams reflected
nth til greater intensity from the water
md there We lay for four mortal hours.
Every man had brought those edibles and
that seemed best in his own eves.
There was any amount Of ham, sausage. and |
hackers lots Of all kind of liquor, especial.
= Bourbon-but not drop Of water.
whisky Is very well for steady drink on
and, put man wants soIne water t. stand |
'eing boiled oil day in the blazing srn. / can
ssert from sad experincs.
It makes me dry now to think Of those
our hours.
Along in the afternoon, We undertook to
lean ourselves, and after much scrapinp and
uosing, did manage to get of good deal Of
ne mud but It was evident that the pristine
..urity Of eur uniform was among the things
h0