Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1862-01-02
A NEW HAIR OIL.


for their careful toilets. boarded at house
where the servant girls take their share of
hair oils, tooth washes, and use the hair
brushes and cologne water regardless Of ex-
pense. The young men, rooming together.
we're in the habit of getting pint Of bair
oil made up by the druggist at time, and
finally they were in the habit Of finding that
pint of this costly hair oil wouldn't last a
week, and that all the servant girls in the
house emitted the same perfume that they
! did, 1t was not long before they came to a
conclusion in the matter. So one evening,
when the hair oil cruise was empty, they
took the bottle which contained it. and
straight they went to the drug store. There
was clerk, and mixture of various articles
in pint bottle, and the following was mark
ed on the prescription book as the contents:
'..Of lac assefntida,. which, for the infor-
nation of our readers we will state. is a
highly concentrated extract of that delicious
drug-of this one ounce
'Of liquor potasse Ga fluid celebrated for
its corrosive quality, having the power Of
taking the hair off dog in ten seconds
half an ounce.
"Of balsam fir, (the stickiest and gumiest
article known one ounce.
''Of alcohol, to make the ingredients fluid,
half pint
This was we'll ''shuck." and deposited in
the usual place occupied by the hair OIL
The next day Sunday, Dave and Bob
dressed themselves for church, and after
finishing, travelled down stairs. But they
came up another way in few minutes, and
secreted themselves in room adjoining
theirs, where they could see everything that
went on. After the people of the house had
gone, two or three servant girls came into
Dawes room.
"Whist. Molly" said large, red-headed
one, "Misther Dave has more of the lie, and
my hair is as dhry as powdher; let's have a
regular fix up wild the folks all away"
This was acceded to. and they all went to
oilng their locks. being very lavish of the
fuid which was quite thin, in consequence
of the alcohol. In few minutes red head
says:
''Whirri, what smils so Z" with her nose
turned skyward.
'"Sure its the parfume," interrupted a
short and dumpy specimen with her. hair
down her back.
Parfume, indade," says the red head,
'that not parTuHe, II rire
"Mebby," says the dumpy. Its the
Patch Chewley. I've heard folks say that
Patch Chewley smills dreadful at fust; a
person must get used to the smill before
they likes it. Sure it's parfume used by
the quality"
This satisfied red head, and after tho
rough ''ileing' they left the room. In about
two hours the boarders came home from
church.
"Good gracious, what is it? Bless my
soul, Mr.. G., 1 shall faint! Oh. my dear
there must be an unclean animal in the
room!' and thousand other expressions
were heard, as the boarders got sniff at
the ''Patch Chewley," when they entered
the house. The master and mistress of the
house were puzzled. csnfounded, indignant,
and in vain endeavored to discover the To-
cality of the smell. At dinner time there
were not dozen boarders at the table, and
those that were there rapidly thinking of
backing out, as the three girls who were
''iled'' were waiting on them,
Finally dinner was given up, and with
doors and windows opened, the inmates al
ternately froze and suffocated. The day
was dire one to them, but it soon wore
away.
Atnight the three girls attempted to comb
their hair. The alcohol had evaporated,
leaving the balsam of fir and honey, and
they might as well have attempted to comb
a bunch of shingles. At the first dash that
red-head made, her comb caught, and infu-
enced by the potasse at the roots, the whole
mass of the front hair came off red-heads S
Uranium, which she discovered with yell
that would have made cannibal envious.
The same result attended the rest of the
hair, with the exception of enough to do up
as scalp-lock, to ornament with feathers.
in Indian style. The two ether girls met
the same fate, and about ten o'clock that
night they might have been seen wrapping
up their lost ''Patch Chewley" locks in
pieces Of paper The next morning they
were informed by the mistress that she did
not desire to employ bald headed servant
girls, and with their "chists" they departed
in almost scalped condition.
| The discovery of Dave and Bob's connec-
ton with the transaction was not known till
lately, but their toilet articles since then
have been as sacred from touch as the tomb
of Palestine.
TRUE CoURAGE.-For man to say that
his soul is incapable of fear. is just as absurd
as to say that, from popularity of consti-
tuition. when dipped in water, he does not
get wet. You, human beings, whoever you
may be, when you are placed in danger and
reflect upon the fact, you feel afraid. Don't
vapor and say move know how the men
tai machine must work, unless it be diseas-
ed. Now the thoughtful man admits that
bullet through hissbrain would be very
serious thing for himself, and likewise for
his wife and children-he admits he shrinks
from such prospect-he will take pains to
protect himself from the risk, but he says
that if duty requires him to run the risk, he
will run it. This is the courage Of the civil
lized man, as opposed to the blind, bulldog
insensibility of the savage This is cour-