The Union and journal. [volume] (Biddeford, Me.) 1858-1882, 1862-03-14

TN,.,,,rov. will now, insteao VI yVu' a"u
i% nssn y, home bere and play housakeeper'
yeu sIl see which Of us will have the
s.S,,e.t task and come out the best
..lgreed h" thundsred Peter; you'll have
.hsnce 10 find out, once for all, what Q
,.oor husband has to suffer. The trial will
teach you lesson ofrespect-something you
greatly need" r-r. ..r-s,
So the next morning, at day-break, the
wife set out afield, with the rake over Der
shoulder and the sickle by her side, all Joy.
Gus at the sight Of the bright sunshine anu
singing like lark. 49,,
Now, who felt not little surprised, and q
little foolish, too, to find himself shut up ~
home Our friend Peter the Graybeard.-l
Still. he was not going to own himself beaten,
hut ieii 20 work churning butter as though
he had never done anything else all the days
Of his life.
IL, no hard matter to got overloaded
when one takes on new trade, and Peter
soon, feeling dry, went down into the cellar
TO draw u mug Of beer from the cask. He
had Just knocked out the buug and was APP
plying the srigot, when he heard an ominous
crunching and grunting overhead. IL was
the sow. devastating the kitchen,
"Oh Lord my butter's lost :" yelled Pc
ter the Graybeard, as he rushed pell.mell up
the the steps, with the spigot in his hand
What spectacle was there the churn up
set, the cream split all over the floor, and
the huge SOW fairly wallowiug in the rich
and sayory tide.
Now even wiser man would have lost all
patience; as for Peter, he rushed upon the
brute, who, with piercing screams, stroye to
escape but ii was hapless day to the thief,
for her master caught her in the doorway
and dealt her 50 well applied and vigorous a
blow ON the skull with the spigot that the
sow fell dead on the spot.
As he drow back his novel weapon, now
covered with blood. Peter recollected that
he had not closed the bung-hOle Of the cask,
and that all this time his beer was running
to waste. So down he rushed again to the
cellar. Fortunately, the beer had ceased TO
run, but then that was because not u drop
remained in the cask.
lie had now to begin his mornings work
again, and churn some more butter ii no ex-
pected to see any dinner that day. So Peter
visited the dairy-house. and there found
cream to replace what he had just lost. At
il he goes again, and churns away more Wig.
orously than ever. But. in the midst Ot his
churning, he remembers-a little too late to
DO sure, but better late than neyer-that the
COW was still in the stable, and that she had
neither food nor water, although the sun was
now high above the horizon. Away he runs
then to the stable. But experience has made
him wise: "I've my little child there roll-
ing on the floor now, IL leave the churu,
the greedy scamp will turn il over, and some
thing worse might easily happen ~ Where,
upon, he takes up the ehurn ON his back and
hastens to the well to draw water for the
cow. The well was deep, and the bucket did
not 20 down tar enough. So Peter leans
with all his might, in hot haste. on the rope,
and away goes the cream out of the churn,
over his head and shoulders into the well.
.Confound il :" said Peter between his
teeth, "It's clear that I'm TO have no butter
to-day. Let's attend to the COW. it's too
late 70 take her out TO pasture, but there's a
fine lot OF has on the house-thatch that hash {
been cut, and 50 she'll lose nothing by stay
ing Mt home" To get the COW out OF the
stable and to get her ON the house roof was
no great trouble, for the dwelling was set in |
n hollow in the hill side. 81 that the thatch
was almost on level with the ground. A
plank served the purpose of bridge, and
behold tho cow comfortably Installed in her
elevated pasture. Peter, of course, could
not remain upon the roof to watch the ami
NAL, he had 10 make the midday porridge
and take il to the mowers. But he was a
prudent man, and did not want To leave his
cow exposed TO the risk Of breaking her
bones, SO no tied a small rope around her
neck, and this rope no passed carefully down
the chimney Of the cottage into the kitchen
below. Having effected thus no descended
himself, and entering the kitchen, tied the
other end Of the rope 10 his leg.
..In this way" said he I'll make sure that
the COW will keep quiet. and that nothing
bad can happen to her.
He now filed the kettle, dropped into II
goad lump OF lard, the necessary vegetables
and condiments. placed II on the well-piled
fagots, struck fire with flint and steel, and
was Just applying the match to the wood,
blowing il well the while, when, all at once,
crish-crlsh away goes tho COW, slipping
down over the ROOT and dragging our good
man, with ono leg in the air, and head down.
wards, clear up the chimney. What would
have become of him, no one can tell, had not
a thick bar Of iron arrested his upward flight.
And now there they are. both together, dangl'
ING in the air, the COW outside and Peter IN
side, both. too, ut,erius the most frightful
cries OF distress.
As good luck would have il, the wife was
Just as inpatient Us her husband. and. when
she had waited just three seconds to see
whether Peter would tring her porridge at
he stated time. she darted OF for the house
rs though IL were on FIRE. When she saw
the cow swinging between heaven and earth,
she drew her sycle and cut the rope, greatly
to the delight Of the poor brute who now
found herself safe again on the only sort OF
hoor she liked. II WIS chance no less for
tunate Tor Peter, who was not accustomed To
gazing at the sky With his feet in The air.
But he fell smack into the kettle head fore
most. II had been decrecd however, that all |
should come out right with him, that day,
the IRE had,died out, the water was cold,
and the kettle awry, 81 that he got OF with
nothing worse than q scratched forehehead,
a peeled nose. and two well scraped checks,
and thank Heaven! nothing was broken but
the saucepan.
When his better half entered the kitchen,
she found Master Gnybeard looking very
sbeepish aud bloddy.
"well! we'll said shs. planting her arms
akimbo, and her two fists on her launches,
"whose the best housekeepsr. prHy4 have
moved and reaped, and here | am as good as
I was Yesterday, while you, ysr Mister Cook,