, 1862-05-08
Uncle samuel's Teeth.

Once on time, q mutiny arose among
the teeth Of worthy man, in good health
and blessed with . sound constitution, com
monty known as Uncle Samuel. The cut
ting teeth, or incisors, and the eye.teeth, OF
CANNES, though not nearly so many, ell
counted, nor SO large nor so strong as the
grinders, and by no means so white, but on
the contrary very much discolored, began
to find fault with the grinders as not good
company enough for them. The eye.teeth,
being very sharp and fitted for seizing and
tearing, and standing out taller than the
rest, claimed to lead them. Presently, one
Of them complained that It ached very
badly, and then another and another. Very
soon the cutting teeth, which pretended they
were supplied by the same nerve, and were
proud Of il, began to ache also. They all
agreed that it was the fault Of the grinders.
About this time, Uncle Samuel, having
used his old toothbrush (which was never q
good one, having no stiffness in the bristles, }
for four years, took new one recommended
to him by . great number of people as q
homely, but useful article. Thereupon all
the frOnt.teeth, one after another, declared
that Uncle Samuel meant to scour them
white, which was thing they would never
submit to, though the whole civilized world
was calling on them 10 do 50. So they all
insisted on getting out Of the sockets in
which they had grown and stood for 90 many
years. But the wisdom.teeth spoke up for
the others, and said:
"Nay, there be but twelve Of you front
teeth, and there be twenty Of US grinders.
We are the strongest. and good deal near.
est the muscles and the joint, but we cannot
spare you. We have put up with your
black stains, your jumping aches, and your
snappish looks, and now we are not going to
let you 60, under the pretence that you are
to be scrubbed white il you stay. You
don't work half 50 hard as we do, but you
can bite the food we'll enough, which we
can grind so much better than you. We
belong to each other. You must stay"
1hereupon the frout.teeth, first the CANNES
or dOg-teeth, next the incisors or cutting
teeth, proceeded to declare themselves out
Of their sockets, and no longer belonging to
the jaws Of Uncle Samuel.
Then Uncle Samuel arose in his wrath,
and shut his jaws tightly together. and swore
that he would keep them shut till those ach.
ing and discolorod teeth Of his went to
pieces in their sockets, II need were, rather
than have them drawn, standing, as some Of
them did, ct the very opening Of his throat
and stomach. s-
And now, if you will please to observe,
all those tessh are beginning to ache worse
than ever, and TO decay very East, 90 that Il
will take great deal Of gold to stop the
holes that are forming in them. But the
great white grinders are as sound as ever,
and will remain 90 until Uncle Samuel thinks
the time has come for opening his mouth.
In the meantime they keep on grinding IN .
quiet way, though the others have had to
stop biting for . long time. When Uncle
Samuel opens his mouth, they will be e
ready for work Is ever; but those poor dis.
colored teeth will be tender for crest while,
and never be 90 strong as they were before
they foolishly declared themselves out Of
their sockets.