The New York herald., 1862-11-11
Now Way 20 Got Rld ef the Conservs-
Grwaa.

moro are gonoraily several ways or accom-.
plishing the Same object The abolition radicals
having determined that they must rid them
selves OF the troublesome conservatives, who are
all the time talking about restoring the Union
and maintaining the constitution, and who
will not bow down and worship the inevitable
| negro that the abolitonists have set up have
found themselves rather puzzled as to the
naodus operandi Of the affair. One plan after
another has been suggested by theoretical and
theological radicals; but all have failed, and the
conservatives have multiplied and increased
most annoyingly and unaccountably. But
whore there's will there's way says the old
proverb, and the radicals, having the will very
strongly, have at last fortunately hit upon
the way.
Brother Bsecher, We remember, recommend
ed the radicals TO treat the constitution as .
piece Of useless parchment, and to get rid of
the conservatives Wendell Phillips went fur
ther, and advised tearing the constitution to
tatters. Garrison indulged in profanity, urged
that the constitution was q mixture OF death
aud hell and burned copy it every year in
Massachusetts,. Greeley, moro hypscritical,
but with the same intention, wanted to super
sede tho Did constitution and make new
one, with no conservatism about It. None
Of these plans worked we'll, however. The
more the radicals attacked the constitution the
more conservatives they saw springing up to
support it. Then Cassius Marcellus Clay came
along, and declared, In his usual courageous
STYLE that he was for getting rid of the oon-
servatives by hanging them. Greeley, who is
always insanely attempting to reform every
thing and improve upon every idea Of wiser
men than he. wanted the guillotine substituted
for the gallows- Neither the guillotine nor the
gallows weld answer, however; and then that
little villain Raymond suggested Fort Iafay-
cite. Then came the elections. and the result
proved that there were more conservatives than
Fort Lafayette and all the other forts in the
country could hold. Every plan seemed ex-
halisted, therefore, and the radicals were al
most In despair when Count Adonis Gurowski.
the great Russian nobleman, appeared in tri-
urpph and chivalrously offered to shoot every
conservative that Greeley would spit upon,
This brilliant idea would undoubtedly have
been adopted bs Greeiey's courage and saliva
unfortunately failed him, and GurowsN was
pursued by constables fourshing unpaid hotel
bills. How to got rid of the conservatives was,
consequently, still! an unsolved problem, and
puzzled the radicals nightly. But, as we have
before remarked, there are more ways than one
Of getting at a thing. and the right way WAS
bit upon at last.
Secretary Mephstopheies Chase is doubtless
the euthor Of tine plan upon which the radicals
have inally decided. None but man like
him. who had neutralj1ed the bost efforts Of
the best army .he world ever saw and who had
deranged the finances Of the richest country on
earth, could ever haye conceived 50 magnificent
programme. sect rid Of the conservativesy"
said Mephistopholes Chase, in his usual genial,
pleasant way; why, it's ~ easy getting
Mcdowell a command or depreclatiug govern
meut paper .i.:y per cent. Don't bother
aboat banging or shooting or imprisoning the
conservatives, but dismiss them-dsmiss them"
No sooner said than done. The radical leaders
went to work with wiil--Major General Me-
Clellan, the chief Of our conservative generals,
was dismissed from his command without the
least hesitation. and the new radical programme
vas fairly ioauguratad. 0tnet conservative
generals will 60 Deyt-Wool, Dix. Burn
side, Butler. Crittsndcn, Grant. Hcntzelman,
Couch. Franklin. Porter, Wright aud the rest.
Then Seward, Blair and Bates, the conservative
members OF The Cabinet. will be dismissed.
Then all the conservative soldiers in tho army
will be dismissed. Then all the conservative yo-
tiers in the country will be dism ssed. Then and
not ill then n-whcn all the conservative gene
rails are dismissed from commands. all the oon
seryatve Secretaries IRON the Cabinet, all the
conservative soldiers from tho army, all tho
conservative sailors from tho nary and all the
conservative people from the country-will the
radicals have quiet minds and peaceful con-
sciences aud the territory Of that once power
full nation--thc United States OF America be
divided between the rebels, the aigsers and tho
abolitonists. That good time i, coming soon,
Msssa Greeley. Work and wait little longer
\ Pgi.,vtSI AND PKiACs ON Tna SAME TaCK.-
In the numerous aud powerful speeches
which Mr.. John Van Buren, delivered in this
city and throughout the State on the eve Of the
late election ne took the ground that the proper
mode Of putting end to the war was for the
federal army TO drive the rebels out Of Vir-
ginia, take possession OF the Confederate cspi-
tAl and there declare an aruistice pending the
pacific settlement Of our national difficulties.
lie paid no attention whatever to the rgcsi
dents proclamation declaring that slavery
would be abolished in such States or
parts sf States ~ should be in In
surrcctioa against the government on the
LIST Of January. 1865, and did moi discuss the
bearing or policy Of that document Since the
astounding victory OF his party last week Mr.
Van Buren, has had time to digest tho Presi
dents proclamation, aud, strange to say. he
finds himself in accord with Mr.. Lacoln in so
far ~ the spirit Of that paper Is concerned.