Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1862-05-31


looking on seemed mighty tickled about it.
Dad he just spit out 1.-the of his mind
right on the spot, and he told them they
didn't know no better than to laugh at an
unfortunate females misfortunes
81 wouldn have cared snap if had
MT give my TUSCAN such jam, Angcliue
daubed her face all over mud, and | went
with her to pump that was there on the
park, aud she washed her face. Dad
bought cocoa nut and cracked it on the
iron fence that was around the pasture
After we ate that up he axed US if we didn't
want to see a steamboat OF course we
said yes so he fastened the boss good and
strong, and we started. Twas killing
way to walk, but we got there finally.
'Twas as pretty as picture, that
steamboat. 1t was right close up to what
they called the dock, and there was thing
made out of boards to walk on to it on.-
Dad went fust, and we gals follerod.
tell ye it was furnished as nice inside as
Deacon Browns parlor the wood was
corvcd and golded, 1t was splendid, and
no mistake
"What puzzled me was were the folks
slept. Dad took US down stairs and show
ed US some little shelver all around the
room; and then we all went down into
the kitchen. l told nigger woman who
was there how to make some gingerbread;
for she was housekeeper for the steamboat,
and thought Id be doing a favor; but
the pesky thing, she grinned clear round
to her ears, and showed her teeth and
rolled up her eyes, and says she:
81 guess youse from the rural districts
81 never answered her, but kept right
straight after dad He took US down into
the place in the basement of the steamboat
where they had their machinery and steam
arrangements ; but they had such q big
fire down there, and was so pesky hot that
we soon left. We hadn't any more than
got through the chambers of the boat and
up into the parlor, then dad heard man
say, well, there goes the bell; the boats
agoin' to start =
"'Cut sticks, gals said dad, and we
run with all our might, dad right close af>
ter US. We got across-us gals-the
plank concern, and then turned round to
see if dad was coming. They were pull
ing the great plank into the boat; dad
looked scared; he run, and the men who
were pulling in the plank larfed an hol-
Tered out:
"'Go it, countryH
"Jest that minute there come q man
runniu putin and BLOWN, trying to get
on the boat afore it left. He was in such
pucker that he bout knocked me over.
He didn't see dad they both sprung at
the same time-the man for the boat, and
dad for the land. Plump they struck
right agin each other, and right down into
the brlny deep they went. Dad said af-
forwards that the water tasted about as
much like fish or pork brine as anything
that he knowed on.
"The folks on the boat, which was 60.
ing way off by this time, cheercd just like
a Fourth of July celebration, and the peo-
pie on the shore hollered and larfed. 1
was so mad that | could have slapped them
right in the face, and says dad-sputter-
ing, kicking and splattering-
"Laugh at fellows misfortunes
"But there was some real kind men;
they took some long poles with things kim
der shaped like fsh.hookS on the ends
they called them boat hooks. The strange
man could swim, and he swum and scram-
blcd up on to the shore, but them men
they hitched them ere hooks right into the
slack of dads trousers and drawed him
right out of the water. Warn't he sight!
he looked just like cat that had been
ducked into mill-pond.
"Let's go'n' take somctbin', said the
stranger, smilin'; but dad looked as blue
as an indigo bag; he didn't no what else
to say SO says he;
"Dont care if do
"The strange man went ahead and we
and dad followed him. Bimeby we come
to place where the lower panes of the
window where white, so you couldn't see
through em. Thinks I that must be a
great thing, that must What's glass good
for if you cant look through it? Dad
told US to wait outside, and he and the
stranger went in. Angolne and 1 stood
up on tp'toe and peoped through the up
per pancs the window. Dad was drink.
ing something poured out Of tumbler /;