The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1862-09-19

aout iron clad, SOS | was sure nothin coul
hurt newly, I'd jest as lives 60 round bu
tin other foalks as not-I think the Monito
line would suit me-but my physical corpora
system is too valooable-in every pint of vie,
to be exposed in unprotected state Of ma
tur.
Do you suppose they would draft me eff
went back? l skersly think twould be con
stitootional. I've gained resident hear-a,
would kim under the statoote perwided flu
/ furriners. I'm too old, was candydate fo
offs under the general government-nob
kin prove that was born in the Unite,
States-I tried to jine the Quakers-hain
got teeth enough to bite catridge-neve
he'd the mumps-might be TUX with en- a
any time-the smell of gunpowder makes M
sick, specially when its mixed with lead -sucl
klmickal combinations never agreed with me
Et these disabilities don't constitoot me al
len under the haabeas Korpus act, wot a
aour free institootions good for? Eff I've
constitutional objection to gunpowder-ta tain
my fault-its oilfactory pervision of natu
that's what it is. Eff prefer keepin my hu
man form devine hull, to hevin it bored full
of holes, SOS twould look more like cullen
der than the noblest work of God-don't
show good taste? I'm willin them as is diff
ferently sot up by natur should go to war
in fact want en- to-why can't they be e
qually ginerous and let me stay to hum?
Here's sitooation-a sitooation of tn,
distressedest kind-for a man who's olIer
ben respected feller citizen! I've lost m,
own country-an furain nations don't wan
me-lm ostrichised, ,expatiated and dis frank
inchised- "a Wanderin Ju of the nineteenth
sentry-can't get footholt anywheres.-
Noahs duv was more fortinit-she could g
back can't-thereS no ark for me, n,
nobody to open the window ef there was
l shall probably starve to death jist like
the children in the wood-only don't blew,
these Kernuck robbings will take the troubl,
to kiver me up.
Et the last words of dyin unfortinit vii
hev any effect ON them who is turnu :hei
eyes in this direction-I would say, don't Il,
1t. Better run the risk of nineteen drafts
better stand yer chance Of heyin yer bone
billed and made into ornyments to adorn she
seceshers, than to find yerself stranger il
this unaccountably strange land.
I've tried every method except worh-,c
get an honest livin here. There ar two o
three fe,ler stockholders here who airn liyil
as furrin correspondents of the Trybune.
tried the dodge to write to lIorris, but h
haint been sivil enough to reply-then under
TUX to come the George Francis Trane, bu
the half-breed blue-nose lion won't bear hal
as much as the old seed one at home does
my fnst bust of irrepressibe patriotism COS
uiS ouHSeu eye oil d OTOktN nOSp. 11dSllN
tried to jine niger settlement, tellin then
| was Octeroon-an would have gone a
a merlatter, or aberlishunist-but the suit,
cusses voted me naudible onless | would g
into holy matermony with young lady o
the African persuasion-aged 5S-an weigh
in 2S;j lbs averdypois-an considerable mor'
appotycaries ditto. declined this temptil
offer for the present-solely on constitution
al grounds-holdin it in reserve, hopin tha
Greely may yet want me.
Mr. Greedy, eff you've got any baowe,s 0
compassion, don't let me be sacrificed. XII
you fold yer arms an MUNICH yer peanuts
when fel,er critter is totterin on the brinl
of Mumbo Jumcoo One word from YOU vii
save me from this woo!en destiny Must
man be forced into the merino bisness agir
his will ? Must he jest for the want of lit
tie encouragement, run the risk of becomin;
the venerable ancestor of long line of mill
an merlasses collered defendants Horris
help ME. ETHAN SPINE