Daily State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis, Ind.) 1861-1865, 1862-05-24
For the Daily State Sentinel.
A N0vci.Reader Married.
NUMBER TWO.

EDITOR SENTINEL:-My honeymoon has
already waned; my sweetening has all turned
to vinegar; and cannot help exclaiming in
poetic language: o, wedock wedlock, why
do fools rush madly, blindly into the moose
matrimonial. there vainly to struggle and kick
forever, whilst others, older and palmer than
YOU, are skipping over the green meads of
Irritation, without conjugal bride on their
fancies.
But to return to my own sad melancholy
story.
Ny eyes still continued sore despite my anx-
iety for their recovery, for had never read of
sentimental heroine being thus afflicted, al
though have sometimes wondered how those
weeping nymphs could shed such oceans of
tears without ever being troubled with either
sore eyes or red noses. Not needing the adj
vice OF my physician, who assured me that
time, rest and patience were all my eyes
needed for their recovery, | consulted ia
nous optician, who informed me that he could
cure any common disease of the optics in five
minutes, the most difficult case in ten, and
make them so strong that one could see
through a two-inch plank and half mile
beyond il, during the remainder of his life.
He used so many big words that l was
really aStonished at the vastness OF his learn
ing. But | could only remember one of the
many terms he applied to my eyes; he said
there was an incipient catamount III both.
did not have sufficient money with me to
pay him if he undertook the cure, so | was
obliged to relate the result of my call TO my
husband.
madam" said Mr.. Lucifer, after listening
to me, as he abruptly left the room, IL did not
know before that YOU were such n fool"
This was too much for my delicate nervous
organization, and | should have fallen into
state of unconsciousness had there been any
one near to have restored me. As it was, |
sat by the window of our boarding house.
wondering what new attitude of distress would
most affect Mr.. Lucifer, when | saw one of
my old flames approaching
BY the by, he Is great admirer of Byron,
and imagInes himself second edition OF this
weeping. wailing woman-witching poet As
soon a perceived him, claSped my hands
together, dropped my head on my breast, and
commenced signing like the wind. when it
whistles through a grove of waving pine trees,
or like the splinters on rail when they are
rocked by the autumnal blast.
"Ye Gods my loved and lovely Wilhelmina.
what do | see" he exclaimed in heart-rcnding
tones, "a he sank down on his knees al nv
feet.
Il did not see YOU before; and how long
have yol been Witnessing my deep agony of
despair?' sweetly walled.
"'Twa, only just now that | beheld the dis
tracing spectacle, and fain would comfort
thee"
Never, nevemore. Caesar Augustus shall
get out OF this deep gloom. but, like Edgar
\. Poes raven, shall qua K myself to death"
III. thunder and lightning, q Jove. | can't
stand this. Wilhelmina. l shall 20 up in a
conilagration | shall die OF someihng-l don't
know what"
And /, too, when death has laid his cold
icy fingers ON my warm beating heart; when
my anguished pulse has ceased to beat. l. too.
shall expire tor want of breath"
20, don't say thus. my angel Thou of the
heaven-kisslng lips, come 10 my arms and rest
thy sin-sick soul on this volcanic thumpinp
breast"
No. no. Caesar Augustus. 90 now. and re-
member that in heaven we shall read novel.
together forever and ev"-
just at this moment my husband entered
the apartment, and seizing Caesar Augustus
Pomeroy by the eoat-coIar gave him a most
unPoehcai KICK and sent him sprawling out
of doors into the muddy streets.
| cast an agonizing look toward, him. saw
HIM pick himself up. and beat an inglorious
retreat; and then. a. quite a crowd were as
sembled. IN order to display my acute sens-
bihtes, became unconscious.
heard Mr.. Lucifer tell the bystonders tha,
he would administer an effectual remedy for
my faintness, and the next moment, O shades
of the departed, | was deluged with unroman-
TIC buttermilk.
have not swooned since that time, although
have not ceased to bewail the unsentimental
exit OF Caesar Augustus from my presence.