The Portland daily press., 1862-10-25
A Discontinued Rebel Soldier.
AN UNWILLING SOLDIER IN THE REBEL
RANKS.

AN UNWILLING SOLDIER IN THE REBEL
RANKS.
The Frederick Md Examiner, publishes a
letter written by soldier of the Fifth Ala
bama regiment, on the day before the battle of
Antietam, which was afterwards picked up on
the field. The writer says:
In CAMP, September 16, 1862
My DEAREST PARENTS Il once more sit
down to drop you few lines this pleasant
morning. l am still in the land ofthe living
thanks TO God-and in tolerabe health.
had severe attack of the diarrhea from eat
ing green corn on our march, but am now get
ting over it. We have had some very hard
times since wrote to you last; we have had
hard marching and but little to eat l often
thought of home aud its comforts, and COM
pared them with my present hardships But it
is useless to complain; there are no kind
hearts here to.pity, and no fathers words of
consolation, no mothers look OF sympathy, no
brothers to share our burdens, and no kind
sister to console US in our sorrows. Oh, how
i miss the social endearments of home.
never could fully appreciate all the blessings of
a good home until entered camp.
IF il we're not for the consolation of religion
l do not know how | should be able to
to bear up under il. but whenever feel oppres-
sed l fly To my Bible, and there l can always
find consolation. Dear mother, you do not
know how much | have been comiorted from
the dear little Bible you gave me when l let
home, and how much have thought OF your
parting advice. There is so much wicked
ness in camp; almost every moment you hear
some one taking Gods name in vain. / am so
sick of camp life; wish l were out of it:
hare no heart in this ,car. How many thou
sands of poor creatures are hurled unprepared
into the presence OF their maker, A soldier
of all men, should live close TO God, and yet il
seems to me they never think of dying. al
though their comrades fall all around them
We had severe fight on Sunday; our regi-
ment was cut up terribly. l was sick and was
not in the fight. They say it was awful: our
company is nerrly all killed or wounded; the
slaughter was terrible. 1t is generly thought
We will have much hard lighting soon, as the
Yankees are close after us.
Il have had many chances to desert since
we have been in Maryland, but my pride will
not permit me. Although Itvds ditcdys oppos-
ed TO this rdr, and think it pds begun Without
good cause, and only to crafty the ambition
Of broken politicians, yet l cannot bear the
disgrace of being called deserter. Besides,
l could not come home to see my dear parents
and brothers and sisters any more; so think
i will try to stick it out, and trust my life in
the hands of my Hevenly Father, and if it
should be His divine will that we are never TO
meet again on earth, we have His promise of
a happy meeting beyond this vale OF teaas,
where brother will no longer war with brother
and death will never come; but would love
to be at home with you all once more.
"When think il over it seems as though it
cannot be that we are separated; l often dream
of nome and the loved ones left behind me.
When came over the mountains few days
ago, stopped and looked down on the beau-
tiiul fields and the happy farm houses and cat
tie grazing, and none OF the desolating marks
of war We're here; then could not restrain
the falling tear as compared the happy land
before me with the desolate appearance of my
own loved native land and the parts of Virgin
la we came through. You have no idea of the
horrors of war; language cannot describe it
men seem to live and die without a thought of
God or eternity-many, with "A terrible oath
of blasphemy in their mouths, going right into
the presence of Il holy God with horrid curses
and inprecations on their tongues. May the
Lord have pity upon their poor souls and save
them from the gnawing worm that never dies
There is much more Union sentiment here
than re expected to find think our officers
are sadly disappointed tCih their reception
here, although they do not say much. / do
not think the people of Maryland generally
wish to cast their destiny in our hands There
are many who wish us WE'LL whilst but few
will come forward to assist us. | think our
leaders have been greatly deceived by misrep-
reservations as TO TO the true sentiment of the
DeODle here They are not us. y n NJ