Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-05-24
Fact, Fancy and Fun.

Fact, Fancy and Fun.
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I "A foot Of light, dry snow Is equal
to m inch of rain.
| -Matrimony is q game that eyery
young person should take a hand at.
The rebel confederacy sprung IN
the Fall, and is likely to fsll 10 The
Spring.
! TO terminate lawsuit speedily Il
the next best thing to never have con-.
menced it. ~ SD
1t has been ascertsined that the
man who held on to the last" wss .
shoemaker.
Economy is no disgrace It il bet
ter living on little than outlivinv Q
great deal.
Did you ever know . speaker Ia
promise ''only = few words" aud not
utter a great many.
The ancient Greeks buried their
dead In jars. Hence the origin Of the
expression, "He's gone to pot"
If man is murdered by his hired
men, should the coroner render : ysr.
dict Of killed by his own handsl
. The idle man is the devils hire.
ling, whose livery is rags, whose diet
and wages are famine and disgrace.
The Savannah Georgian boasts
that the Southern Confederacy il still
Ahoat. Bubbles float till they burst.
1t is for physicians interest thst
men should lead i'll lives, and 30 he
not unfrvquently sets them the exam
pie. =
At the approsch Of the Federsl
armies the hottest rebel papers get -
cool as it conducted by 20 many Coo
lies. -'.'7.'
The poison of q rattlesnake or 4
copperhead is infused through his teeth
that OF slanderer through his
tongue.
The man who with 3 hammer
mashes the end of his OWE finger. prob.
ably thinks he hast hit the right nail
on the head.
appropriately named-Ths com.
mandsr of the secession rear.puard at
the evacuation Of Bowling Green was
Gen. Hindman.
-Forney's Press says that "the
Southern Confederacy is changing ito
note" 1t has good many notes chat
1t can't get changed.
The fellow in Philadelphia who
was fined q hundred dollars last week
tor biting off mans ear paid = big
price for mean dinner.
The rebels compare the Monitor
to an enormous cheese-box on , plank.
We don't think they will care TO nib.
ble much more around It. fa
-Beauregard wants to make . can.
non out Of bells. We tried to make 4
big gun Of John Bell and Couldn't
But he wasn't true metal.
The editor of a down-cast paper
talks about his frame of mind. A Co.
suggests that he may hare
the frame of one, but that is all. T.
"A long-ago discarded lover con-
soles himself with the reflection that
his loved one is married to 4 lawyer.
has ten children and the measles.
Among the conditions of sale By
o., 1r;ch ou.tinroor xvos <h< <,lln-,s-.
''The highest bidder to be the pnrchss-
er, unless some gentleman bids more"
Whipping may not be necessary
to teach reading, writing and 2riihne-
tic to boys, but it is very aecessary in
teaching loyalty to fnll-growa rebels.
"A man swallowed q set Of teeth
lately, and the last accounts Of him
he was experiencing, as was to be ex.
pected, terrible gnawing at the stom-
ach.
We think that Congress will bs
the principle Of taxation . tri-
de too far, il, as IS proposed, It lays q
tax on corpses for the privilege of BE-
ing buried.
Some young rebels here talk Of
Joining the Southern Confedsracy.-
They can't join it. The thing is yirtu-
ally broken, and Ill the joiners in the
world couldn't join 1t.
A Missouri paper says that the rob
eis 'sget ahead Of the Devil himself In
their atrocities We have no doubt
that they are always ahead Of him, GER
tainly he is after them.
"A clothier occupying > basement
notifies the public that he allows No one
20 sell under him. He is safe enough
IN the statement until another cellar Is
made under the seller aforesaid.