New Orleans daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1851-1866, 1862-05-10
SATURDAY MORNING, MAY 10, 1862.
VicIssitudes of a news Editor.


sleeves; seizes noted proclamation in one hand,
and surgical instrument, vulgary called scissors,
in the other. Takes seat; reads" No publica-
ton, either by newspaper" etc. Scratches bis
head. Looks around. Scratches his head again.
Jumps up suddenly, PAGES the room, dumps him
self violently in his "old arm chair,' throws down
his surgical instrument contemptuously, and
scratches his affrighted head with both hands in
seemingly utter despair.
.Soliloquy.-Now is our summer dreadful hot
not line of news can be got. And if 'twere had,
it is too bad, what could be done with it? "Aye,
there's the rub /" A glance around, no cheering |
sound-not single Wallpapers growing stale
Shade of Dogenes and his tub Let US see. |
Richmond Examiner we'll examine that
Nothing in it," stupid, stale and fat or we're no
Judge of it. "Southern Confederacy," has the
elements for something new, and has served US for
a leader or two. No-the !" Southern Confeder-
acy " is all ablaze, in many ways with war and
wars alarums good news and bad, both gay and
sad (sotto uoce) I" Ring the alarm bell until it
cracks, at least We'll die with harness on our
backs "-cites taken, dinners eaten; battles
fought, the devil caught-with which and whom
we must have nothing to do.
CINTERkUPTIoS. Enter a man who looks in
fernally mad as if he'd had nothing to eat for
whole week-want's to devour all the news in.
stanter. Inquiries for about forty different papers
can't accommodate him with single ene-he
grows impatient, we were 80 already " Sir, have
you nothing from any source" ooh, sir, that as
q matter of course. Here Is Gen. Butler's procla
| nation !" "Dam 1.-THE rest in an abbreviation.
Exit Mr.. Man, terribly indignant SoLILoQUY
RESUMED -" How many stops before our dinner
that fellows fool as we're sinner; he's tossed
and scattered the papers around, and the one we
want is not TO be found-stole it, no doubt, as he
hurried out. Here the soliloquy is again inter-
rupted; editor fumes aud frets PAGES the room
runs against a broken back'd chair and falls over
| it hurts his arm and knee, and damns the pow.
| ers that be-" Makes q grasp for another paper
! first thing his eye lights on-proclamation fall
publications either by newspaper"-muses
| "Oh, thou In Hellas deem'd Of Heavenly birth,
| Muse form'd or tabled at the minstrels viii
Since shamed full oft by later Tyres earth
Mine dares call thee from sacred hill ~
| TCraZy, by Jove-no doubt of twill go down in
yard and stick our head under the hydrant-re.
freshing very-a believer in the water cure-will
write an essay-bigger fools have wrote already.
But bark what shout is borne upon the wind, that
startles thus our much distracted mind. Copy
Oh, golly! "Not q line was carved"-prners
haf-starved-well suddenly return to our duty.
What's here Lynchburg Virginan," welcome
old friend, you'll prove godsend. All, no!
"Stae, flat and Improbable" circulating stories as
indubiable! "To what base uses hast thou come, "
and what thy people done, thou dear old town
: whence Sambo totes de 'baccer down. " Rich
mond Inquirer that's the paper-will satisfy in
quirers for the later and furnish stirring In
garing capitals, there's "Nothing Later only 8
t diatribe against the Jews. I" Daily AZ" WHO
, saw the Sun to-day?'-he does not deign t.
sbine,' which surely is no fault of mine. Nash
yil]e Banner, 90 Take your banner, and 'neatl
the war clouds 'circling wreath, guard it till ou
l homes are free guard it and God will prosper
, thee" "Mobile Tribune" 1.-The creation of the
Tribunes of the people was the era of change il
. the Roman Constitution" The liberation o
| Greeleys Tribune is a most diabolical and mis-
cradle substitution, infusion, confusion, abstru
sion-[Crazy again: will seek the water cure ant
dispe our sorrow, go to bed to night and dream o
s brighter morrow.l Remember Appius Claudius--
i Fit coming up again.. on US let the water rain.
u .'Imperal Caezar, dead and turn'd to clay" ris
, and assist lis through this sorrowful day. "Tri
Weekly News" printed in Houston, Texas; wha
do you here but to annoy and vex CIV,
e DAYS Later from New Orleans!" Confound th
: paper, il that's their " later" what will they hav
e to say, when they get the news of a sadder day
g "Le Meschacebt" Qndian name for Mississippi
+ printed in French, it is pity, for we have sud
denly detected "our French has been mos
t awfully neglected"
n Here the excruciating exertions of the solilc
t quist entirely overpowered his gigantic mind, an
s his ponderous head fell upon the table like fu
e ear Of corn, whose blossom 'scaped yet withere
d in the ripening." He dreams-subterranea dream
h explores vast mines of knowledge; down, dow
y in the deep, dark and mysterious caverns of ar
g cient and modern lore. Thinks he has a lucid il
terval resolves to read the leaders in the dailies
e "What is 'tyou read, my lord ~ % The Currency,
If "Suppy of Beef" Food,'' '' Health and Weatt
e er y" words, words, words ~" put money
J, thy purse ~" plenty to eat," nothing to wear,
II beef is short, but brains are plenty and in gres
II demand +" Health to All '-"Weathers salubrious
is -" Good Digestion wait on Appetite "-mone.
j. beef and health-glorous, grand concatenatie
e -" Excellent most excellent i faith of the cam
IT Icons dish-I feed on ir!'--mmortaity ths sic
" the grave for their authors" hold the mirror u
\. to nature ~" publish right wrong, fools II
" theme and satire my song."] He wakes" th
If bright dream his last ~" Oh, where shall Piud
rus fly ?" Books, books, my only commert
!, now,n What's these-old magazines dry as po1
le der and quite as dangerous - heports anu u
? bates" History of United States y" Journe
N to Foreign Lands ~" Greenland's icy mountain
rs and India's coral strands" Growing desponden
10 all Is vanity A thought, glorious thong
ID illunes our mind" Woman lovely woman, I'll f
5. to you ~" sweet spirit of the past" who wro
it for good more than your glory, gentle Felic
Mt Hemans we'll commune with thee!
th lights and sounds of revey in the vauqu
,f cty's halls,
As by night The feast victory held within its walls
% And the conquerors ild the wine cup high after
bright bloodshed;
al But their lord King of Arragon midst the triumph wal
, the dead ~
- Victory gained, but brother lost Sad retro
~ pect. But what does the grabbed Crabbe--at O
wv time surgeons apprentice and finally the cleric
- scholar-have to say:
" "Strange oer thus trained in sorrows school
Oh Power must be held, asi they must live by rule
ng But we don't want to read that, and so pass
BIS to Heber, the Bishop Of Calcutta:
We 'Ths Apostae Chief, from Msaim's subject shore
re To Acres walls his trophied banners bore;
l., When tho pale markd his proud array,
~, And d ISOLATION hoped an ampler sway
eu But where are we wandering--those were da