The southern aegis, and Harford County intelligencer. (Bel Air, Md.) 1862-1864, 1862-11-08

the telegraf, it you undertake to carry out
the principle Of Abolishin, but you sed
the thing must tech the bottom, an you
was bound to put it through. Now, you
see, the people don't support you. They
don't want niggers made equal to white
men, nor they don't want 'em freed to be
"a tax on 'em. A few fellers like Greeley,
whose brains all seem to run to bran
bread, an free luv, or some other moon
struck nonsense, an some learned fools
like Sumnure, want to try the experiment.,
but they don't represent the people. So
you see, Kernel, that in applyin the princi-
pie YOU have kicked yourself over, an I only
menshin it to show you that if You had
followed my advice you would not have
had these CRATE defeats to mourn over.'
The Kernel looked very solem, an ses
he, "Majer, | know I'd been crate deal
better off if I'd followed your advice all
through these trubbils, but you see I had
to go with my party, an if it had carried
me to the other side of Jordan, | s'pose l
should have gone with it."
That mite thought the Kernel would
60 into spasms, he was SO nervous. [ got
some hot water an soaked his feet in it,
rubbed his bowels with brandy, an laid
flannel on 'em, an bathed his temples in
camfre an rum. But he grew wus all
the time. Finally began to pore the
cordial down him, an then he commenced
to revive. But he didn't sleep scarcely
wink all mite. In the mornin he was the
most limpsy piece Of mankind | ever did
see. L raelly believe he might have been
| tied in knot like an eel, he was SO lin.
Der.
Jest little while after breakfast, who
should come in but Seward. He hadn't
hardly spoken to me sence [ bowed him
up so for alterin the Kernels Constitu-
shinal Teliskope, but this mornin he was
as perlite an as clever as he could be-
Ses he, "Majer, the elecshin news is good,
an our party is successful" SEES I, "Mr.
Seward, l don't understand you" "Why,
Majer,' ses he, and he put on one of the
queerest smiles ever see on mans face,
"don't you know I have turned Dimmo-
crat.' SEES I, "you don't say so."-
eyes" ses be, "I'm Dimmocrat now, an
no mistake" The Kernel looked as if
thunder had struck him. "Wal," SEES I,
"Mr. Seward, that reminds Inc Of a story,
as the Kernel would say" oval" SEES
he, "Majer, what is it. L always like to
hear your stories. They are SO pat. =
"Wal," SEES I, "mebby this will turn out
to be little patter than you like, but,
howsoever, as [ never Spite good story
for acquaintance sake, I will tell it -
Once on time, it is said, an old coon
went out of q night to get some fodder
among the corn fields, an did not return
to his hole until near mornin. Wen be
got hum he saw a skunk had taken poses,
sion Of his hole. He went up an ses he,
who's there?' The skunk replied, "a
coon Are you coon?' 'Yes,' said the
skunk, I'm COON WAL sed the coon,
You don't look like coon-you don't
act like coon, and I'll be darned eff you
smell like COON"
"Now,' SEES I, '"Mr. Seward, you may
be Democrat, but you don't look like
one, nor act like one, nor smell like one,
an I'll be darned eff |. believe you are
one"
SEES be, ..Majer, you are rather person
al" oval" ses l, II don't mean eny
offence, an" ses I "ef you really mean
to be Dimmocrat, let's take drink Of
old rye over the victories in Ohio, Penn
sylvany and Indiany." So he cum up an
we both tux good swig of whiskey.-|
The Kernel looked at us an grit his teeth.
eva" ses be, "ef you are goin to rejoice
in my defeat TIL go over an call on STAN
tin an see eff he can't cheer me up So
the Kernel went off. After he'd gone,
Seward an | TUX another nip of the old
rye, an purity soon we tasted Of it agin rs
The Seckretary is capital drinker, an he
knows what good Ticker is as we'll as eny
Teller I ever see. Finally be got in
very good bumer, an ses he, "Majer,
we've been bad friends long enough" So
he actually Rugged me and sed there warnt
a man that ever lived that be loved SO
much as the old Ginneral, an next to him
his friend Majer Downing Wen /
thought I'D got him in good humer an
he was very talkatiye, ses I, "Mr. Seckre-
tary, kin you tell me how John Van Bu-