Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1862-05-28
PRENTICEANA.


Iisut Worden, of the Monitor, can at pre-
sent see with only one eye, but he can see |
more with that one than any rebel Commodore,
Captain, or Lieutenant can with pair. III the |
rebels see him coming with one eye shut, they |
will be sure to run, thinking he is taking aim
st them.
Recent disaster has spread gloom over the
land and sorrow sits at our hearthstenes.-Jcf
DaUIs'S Proclamation.
And yet our rebels here pretend that all the
accounts Of Federal victories are fables, and
that the Confederate forces are sweeping every
thing before them.
No cup of coffee was ever better settled than
the rebellion will be when Gen. Halleck shall
have struck it one grand blow.
The rebel cities and towns are falling like
row Of bricks.
The rebellion, like huge tree, was many
years in attaining its growth, but it has been
chopped down and will die suddenly.
The rebels should not be allowed to destroy
their sugar But let them ''crush" it if they
choose.
We trust that our Government will soon
have iron steamers that will mind cannOn-balls
as little as Rsbelsiss Giant Pantagruel did,
who, after a great battle, cembed them out OF
his hair.
Let our brave soldiers "fx bayonet" and
then tx the rebels.
ever able to do befOre-silenced some very
noisy members Of Congress.
One half of the rebels are "given over to be-
feVe a lie" and the other to tell it.
There are a great many remedies for sore
throat We are no physicians, but We would
suggest to our rebel friends that running
awsy is the best preventive Of an apprehsnded
misery Of the throat.
Most writers think that peaceable occupa-
a. aff han fbs fa NJ n Sn1d hutu
Laye seldom known a more "peaceable Occu-
pation'' than that of Norfolk and Portsmouth
by our troops.
Our military authorities have organized
several regiments Of sharpshOoters to shoot the
rebels, and they ought to organize as many
regiments Of fast RI nners to catch them.
We say to our brave boys near Corirth, give
the rebels the bayonet If they don't like the
cold steel, warm it by frietien against their
ribs.
The rebels are in the habit of standing
bravely as long as they think there is more
safety in standing than running.
Gen Mcclellan says that he will drive the
rebels 10 the wall. But can he drive them to
the ditch-thst last one?
A good many rebels who talk volubly about
fighting before there was any danger, turn out
20 be towards. Their legs run as fast now as
their tongues did then.
When our forces took possession Of New Or
leans, the people there had been 80 long with
out seeing gold that they didn't at first know
what on earth it was when they did see it.
The Mobile Register tries to crow like
game-cOck in anticipation of the Federal at
tack upon that city. But the noise il makes il
much more like the scream Of dying hen.
All sorts Of horses in Tennessee and the
Southern part Of Kentucky have lately become
Morgan horses"
Though the rebel confederacy has lost its
last ram ID is still rampant.
The Montgomery (Ala.) Advertiser speaks
sneeringly Of 1.-The appearance Of Gen. Mitchell
the Yankee astronomer, on the Southern thea
ter" He certainly seems to be playing
"star engagement
The rebel soldiers, though among the filth
est Of living creatures, are not hard TO take.
W have about made up our minds to accept
ar invitation to deliver Fourth Of July ora
ti,u in Richmond. President Lincoln and his
Cabinet-We are told, will occupy places upon
the platform.
A eousIe of correspondents, Mr.. Virgins
AID Mr.. Baldwin write us joint letter, ask
rusto give them ''less Prentice and more
news Well, we are not news, to be sure,
but then We are always new.
The Richmond Inquirer computes that it will
take Gen. Mcclellan 80 years to get to that
city We guess that Mcclellan will soon cor
rect the Inquirer's arithmetic.
Our rebels, who swear there is no Constitu-
ton, beg US, the moment they think themselves
in danger, to respect that sacred instrument
the Constitution.
correspondent asks whether the Federal
anaconda belongs to the army or the navy"
They own him in common. lie is a jOint-snake.
The rebels are turning their attention now
less 70 the production Of cotton than to pork
hing Cotton is dethroned by King Hog.
The reb ellion doesn't make good times, but
the rebels certainly "make good time"
The Chinese, after a long period Of wet
weather, when they have prayed yainly for
relief put their gods out in the rain TO see how
they like it. For a similar reason, the rejels
would do we'll to cut Of the market-supplies OF
their public functionsries for q few days.
Tie Mobile Register asks Indignantly whe-
ther the men Of the South "are TO be Compel
ri 20 submit 10 the laws Of the Union" Net
Il they will submit without compulsion.
When our troops arrived at Norfolk, they
found bacon selling at 30 cents pound and
candles at 60-dog-eheap, considering the
value Of the paper given in payment
The slaves in the rebel States are undoubt-
eddy running away very fast, but not half SC
fest SO their masters.
All parrots can be taught TO talk, bat the
Cuss that talk with most emphasis are the
Parrot guns.
GOLD At PITTsBURG LANDING "A citizen Of St