Juliet signal. [volume] (Juliet [i.e. Joliet], Ill.) 1844-1???, 1862-09-23
THE WEFE-rANlER.
How DIR Strahan Was Fooled.


Mrs. Morton was a widow-a young,
pretty, rich widOw-when DIR. Charles
Straban made her acquaintance. She was
peer but very handsome when Squire Nor.
ton married her, aud at his death. two
years alter, became sole heir, put on her
widows weeds, and pocketed her deceased
! husbands e. Id at the same time.
Madam Rumor said that poor old Nor
ton never enjoyed single hour after he
married her hut how shouli Madam Ru-
NOR know. OF one thing however, cen give
my readers reliable information. Mrs
Morton had not been widow twelve
months ere she received, with seeming
pleasure, very decided attentions from DR..
Strahan.
Do you inquire who DR.. S'rahau was p
Well, he studied medicine aud had the til
tie Of NJ. ID. conferred cpon him, which he
took pleasure IN attaching to his rame with
a great flourish. But it is asserted that he
never had ha If dozen patients in as
many years. lie was of prepossessiDg APP
| pearancr, Il ready talker upon any subject,
and was, in fact, frst-rate company. lie
| played the flute and sang-was a COED dan
Ger an excellent partner at whist; besides,
he had some literary reputation. He
J
I the Weekly Levler, and last though not
least, he dressed in good taste and in the
height Of fashion; how be did il no one
knew, but then it was no ones business
But must be allowed to correct one ru
NOR which has gained considerable preva-
lence, to the effect that he supported him
self by his litarary labors; an ord. nary
scriller could hardly afford Strahan's ward
rUbe.
Old Squire Merton had been dead but a
! little ever a year when DIR. Strahan, des-
pi,e all the gOsspers could say, married the
Vidow and her fortune. The fact was he
wanted O rich wife-as to her she was anx-
| ious to leave her weeds and go into society
again, and she could divine no reader way
to accomplish these purposes than by mar
rying. When any one spoke to the doctor
about her being shrew, no merely re-
marked that he should take pleasure in
tanning a sbrew.
For three months they lived happy to
J gether, for it was in the height Of the sea-
| srn, and between Cape May, Newport,
/ Saratoga aud the White Mountains, they
were alone with each other scarce three
hours out of the twenty-four consequently
/ it was impossible for them to disagree
! But the season was soon over and they re-
turned to their quiet home-the place of all
others to study wife or q husband. There
IL too unnatural excitement--no fashion
able Mrs. A. to outdress, no profigate
| Mr.. B. to Guido in squandering money no
one to see. to please but the other half
| After O season of long continued gaiety
there necessarily follows one of extreme
| dizziness; and when one is dull one is east.
| " displeased. Now Mr.. and Mrs. St-sLsn
were both remarkably dull, and, as q mat
| ter of course, both were greatly displess-
| ed.
1t was their third day at home upon
which their first quarrel commenced. How
! it commenced neither could clearly tell -
Ii is only known the Strahan expressed a
desire to dine upon roast beef, upon which
| Mrs. S. said she abominated beef, aud would
have roast turkey and Oystar sauce. He'd
have beei or nothing She'd have turkey.
and thus commenced the war Of the Strab-
ans. One ordered the butler not to have
foWl, the other gave strict instructions not
to have beef, while Mrs. S. visited her
friends and partook of turkey.
After supper DR.. S. gave wine supper
in the room which he digni6ed by the
name of study, sort Of variety store IN
which be kept his library, writing desk.
and spittoon. Here also were two glass
cases, one of which contained skeleton
hung on wire in the other was an Esyp-
tisn mummy.
The walls we're hung with curiosities !;
among them a cane from tree which grew
over Wsshington's grave, a snuf-box from
the wood of the Charter Oak, chip from
the United States frigate Constitution,
minerals, shells and fossils of all kinds;
specimen ears of corn, enormous sized fruits
and vege tables. cases of dried 10
sects and picked reptiles. Stuffed birds
were perched about the apartment and
voluptuous French lithographss and pot
traits Of distinguished percentages were