Smyrna times., 1862-04-17
Plain Sermons from Homely Texts,
JERtEL SLAB, PREACHER.

In Book of H T., ls62d Cha pter, latter part
Of 9Th verse, you will find the question. "Who
amt chrisllans?" That's my text.
My bretheren, its mighty sight easiei, now
a,days TO tell who ANT christians than 10 tell
who are. That's pretty hard hit, my breth.
ren, but ii you are christians it won't hurt you
any.
But, because il's easier, amt why took this
text. knew in this day, aud generation, the
least work gets the most pay. And considerin'
this fact, know might say, " Please excuse
me from deaiin' with knot,y pints of scrip,ur',
hard text and such like, till either my pay is
PIT up, or the present fashion put dews." And
tOllern' this fashion and style little further,
might say. {" There are only nine hundred and
sixty nine thousand and one pious men, thus
far, who want to be Chaplains in the army"
So, if you don't like these remarks, can apply
to the Governor or our M. e.. and cast my sslf
a willin' sacrifice on the treasury Of my coun-
try.
But, my brethren, don't say any such thing.
If | can alters have the coop tight enough to
keep the chickens safe, and plenty of food in
the platter, it's all caa use here and I'm will
lin to do all the good can for it.
| And | don't like this text because it's easier
to tell who ain't christians than it is to tell
who are. take 1t, because I've been out
among the stores and shops of Slabtown, durin'
the past week, and found out that some Of you
amt chriltiaRs, l shall 60 out among the stores
and shops, one of these days, and try to ind
out who are christians. When | find out, my
brethren, I'll preacA from that text
The FIRST one went TO see was-well, will
call him brother Smith. Brother Smith keep,
a grocery. Now as was goeO' by one of the
winders of his back room, happened 10 looI
ln--and what do you think saw my brethren
| saw brother Smith pourin' pail OF wate
thro funnel into his molasses barrel. Says
TO myself, Z" the Devils abroad tonight, preach
er Slab, and you better WATCH" Then step
ped up cus to the side of the house. Pretty
soon a ragged looking man, with yske o
oxen that looked as if the buzgards had IskeI
a mortgage on 'em and the time d about run ou,
a load OF wood geed out Of the darkness up Il
the door. The nan went in knew he want
: ed le sell his wood, and listened.
"Good evenin," Mr.. Smith. Do you want I
I buy cord of real good, seasoned, hard mapl
b wood I" said the man.
9 mo, rather guess not. I've got as much Q
| want tor the present"
(Now, brother Smith kept part Of his WOO
! at the back end of the store and part in hi
back room. didn't remember noticin' a yer
f large pile 10 either place as l came along, so
- made a note of brother Smiths answer, an
shortly after went back to see. And what d
d YOU think | saw, my brethren. NUlhin' be
i hind iae store, and just three small sticks i
! the back room)
o The shepherd must watch his sheep, though
:. and SO listened for the poor mans reply.
-" But I've got belsted. My wife issck thI
y she cant raise her head from the pilsr--lher
Il aint mouthful of anything in the house IL
q her or my FIVE children TO eal, and, you knew
I'ln two miles from home! I'm afraid now N
wife'll die sfore | get back-.but my iamil
imusn't starve."
49," That's bad-bBt SEEM it's the case, L
is take your wood, it's good and Iuli cord al
q nav you dollar ind half for it 0ut'n the store
= said brother Smith. a
- "Why, MIR Smith. such wood 10 goen
10 two and half in cash, and quick at that" \
he "Well, If you can sell it for that do it.
I'd told ysu I'd enough for the present." return'
of brother Smith codly. aud then | could he
d him walk in back towards The other end Of q
" store. .e.r ts .--.fr. ,s.g..tg-t-.ai
'g The man stepped to the door. looked out, a
ut then turning back said quickly; "a
L