The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1862-02-05
WAR, fWIT AND HUMOR.

W Ak, VIII AND HU MOK.
The soldiers In Kentucky are furious
OR practical jokes. and are constantly on
the look out for subjects. Oue was re-
Gently procured in the person of new
,ssmster who had the chargeof six large,
shaggy mules. Jehu was also proprietor
of two bottles OF old Bourbon-a con.
traband in camp-which wag discover.
cd, and resolved to possess. Being aware,
that the drivers presence was an impedi.
none to the theft, be hit upon the follow
log plan to get rid of him: - ''g5 q {, S. s.
Approaching the driver, who was busy
currying his mules, be aecuste him with,
Il ray. old fellow, what are yon doing
there2' tas ssa s.
Cant yon seer replied Jehu, grufly,
.CertainIy,' responded the wag, 'Dut
that ia rot yonr business. 1t lis after
tattoo, and there is fellow hired here by
the General, who curries all the mules
aud horses brought in after tattoo .5.
The mule driver bit at once. and want.
ed to know where the hair dresser kept
himself. Whereupon he was directed to-
Gen. Nelson's tent, with the assurance
that there was where the fellow hung
eot.s ~ xYl4sga9
You can't mistake the man. said wsg;
he is large fellow, and puts on thun-
dering sight of airs, for man in his
business. He will probably refuse to do
is, and tell yon to go to the devil, but
don's mind that; he has been driakiug to-
day. Make him come out sure get
Jehu posted of. and entering the tent
whore our Napoleon of theln4sh Division
eat ia deep reverie, probably considering
she most expeditions method ofexpeiling
the rebel Buckner from bis native STATE
slapped him on the back with force safi
sient to annihilate man of Ordinary
sise.s Springing to his feet, the General
aceosted his uninvited guest with, well,
cir, who are you, and what the devil do
you want? @
Old hoss I've got q job. for you now,
SIX mules to. he curried, aud right of,
too,' said the Captain of mules, nothing
daunted at the flashing eye of the Gen.
eral. sstl ielsl ~ 4
DO you know whom yon are addres.
sing. STRIP asked the indignant com.l
mander. sasa.,sk sao,s ..,4.ss
sYes,' said Jehu, elevating his voice to
. pith which rendered the words audible a
square Of. you are the fellow hired by.
Uscle Sam to clean mules, and wont
have any feolishuess Clean them mules,
and I'll give yo1 drink of basthead.' q
sYou internal villainl' exclaimed The.
General, now perfectly furious Il am
General Nelson, commander Of this Di-
visiorp se'ia se3
Jehu placed the thumb of his right
hand against his nose, and extending his
6ugers. waved them slowly, in a manner
supposed by some to be indicative Of
grsstfwisdom. ts ssdseeaa
The Generals sword ieaped from It's
scabbard. and Jehu from the tent, just 10
time to save his head. - .aes fse -.
Our boys drank the big mule driver's
health in Bourbon. The story soon got
out, and is now the joke of the season.
Tony TRIES HIS Gun Toby is high
private in the Mississippi army. < His
company is armed with brsech loading
Maynard riRes, warranted to shoot / Q
times minute. and to carry ball effec,
lively 1890 yards Men who fought al
Monterey end Buena Vista call the new.
fpugled thing 'pop-guu. To test its
efficiency, Toby's captain told them ms6
they must try their guns, In obedience
70 command. Toby procured the necessary
uuui,iors Of war, and started with his
spop- gun, for the woods. Saw squirrel
upls very high tree took aim, fred
Efects of shot immediate and wonderful.
Tree eifsctualiy topped, and nothing OF
the squirrel to be found, except three bro.
ken hairs .Pop-gun' rose in value, equs |,
20 four. pounder. But Toby woulda,t
shoot towards any more trees-afraid OF
bsing arrested for cutting other peoples
timber. Walked mile aud aqnsftsr to-
get sight of hill By aid of small
telescope, saw hill in distance; saw large
rock on hilk put in big load; made ready;
took aim at rock, shut both eyes, 1firsd
As soon as breath returned, opened eyes; !;
could see. just could; but couldn't dis
tisguish any sounds; though Niagara had
broke loose, or ali out of doors had gsni
to drum beating. Determined to see i
shot hi.. Borrowed horse, aud star Ell
towards the hill. After travelling two
days and nights reached the place; sa.
setting san shining through the hill; knew
right away thst was where the shot hit.
Vert closer; stumbled over rocky freg
ments scattered over half q mile in sl'le