North Branch democrat. [volume] (Tunkhannock, Pa.) 1854-1867, 1862-09-03
LETTER FROM MAJOR JACK DOWN
ING.
WAsHINGToN, June 18th, 1862.

WASHINGTON, June 18th, 1862.
To The Editors OF the Caucasian
SURs Il expect QUILL be struck all aback
10 git anuther letter from me, dated Washing
ton, and I'm kinder surprised myself, for
expected to be in Downingville long afore
this. But you'll see, by the time you git
through this letter, that it was impossibul
for me to leave. | got my trunks all packed
up and ready to start, when 10 and behold,
my hickery that Ginneral Jackson give me
was missin Now, | couldn't no more trav-
n without my hickery cane than could sod
der up this broken Union with skim milk
| told Linkin [ was ali ready, but that my
hickery was missn. 80 he called the feller
in pdrty bad close; who does chores around
the White House, and asked him ef he'd
sen it? He said he hadn't Then I reck-
objected that there had been a CabLynct
meetin the night before, and it struck me
that some Of the members had walked off
with it. So Linkin sent the felIer around t.
see. After he'd gone, told Linkin eff any
of 'em had it that I'd bet it was Stantin, for
ses |, Kernel, ever sence he tried to get on
your t7owsers down to Fort Morrow, he's
acted jest as CT he wanted to play Gnneral
jackson, and eff he can git piece of hickory
that the old Ginneral has handled, he'd think
that he was on the way to glory. Sure enuf
he had it, but pretended it was all mis- take,
jest as he did when caught him in the Ker-
nel's trowsers. Depend upon it, Stantin
needs watchin, for he is one of them kind of
lellers who's got it into ther head that they
are for-oTdained for somethin, and they don't
know what.
The loss Of my hickery kept me over one
| Gay longer, and the next morning got the
bottle of Boredom whiskey which you sent to
me. A feller by the name of Adams fetched
it, and he wouldn't take any pay for his
trubbe either. / asked him if he was env
reashin to Phil Adams, who used to keep
tan yard in Downingsvile, as he was a very
clever man and used to do enythlng for his
naybors for nothln. The chap au ghed rite
out loud at this, and sed " he didn't see it.
Ses !, " what don't you see z" "Well," sed
he, never mind, old feller, about telling
| stories, but jest put your name rite Idowu
there" and he handed out big book full of
writin. ses l." Mr.. Adams, l never put my
name to enythIng that don't understand.n
{" Ses ], that may be secesh docyment for all
| know" Ses the feller, ses he, " Git out
this is only receipt for that bottle."-
"Wall," ses I (" eff that's all, then here goes"
So got my spectaoles and quill pen, fir
never rite with eny of the new tangled kinds,
and jest rote out Major Jack Downing"
in stle that made the feller stare. Ses
"Mr Adams, you have some awful poor
riters among the felers you deal with, but
amt ashamed of that ritin eny where"
The chap he. looked at it moment and then
he looked at me, and finally says he Bully
for you," and in jiffy he was off, without
even shakn hands or sayin good by.
After he was gone took the bottle into
Linkln's room and opened it. Now" ses |,
Kernel, let's try this licker." "WaN," ses
he, Majer, Pm good judge Of Boredom,
for il comes from my old State of Kentuck"
Wen Lnkin saw the name on the bottle,
" Mr.. Cotton, 306 Washington street, N. Y,
ses he, "Major do you think that this is 10y
al wiskey?" "Why," ses 7, "Kernel, what
makes you ask that fuestshin 2" "Wall,"
ses he, don't you see the mans name is
Cotton !" "Now,n ses Kernel, what an
idee thatis Don't you suppose it would be
dangerous for him to live down in Secesh