The Goodhue volunteer., 1862-07-02

be ever SO much modified by powers
of self:governance, canno; hold it's own
against countries which are in all res
poets their own masters. ......'
HOW CAMEIO BE MARRIED.
It may he funny, but I've done it.
I've got a rib and baby. Shadows
dcparted-oyster stews, brandy julips,
cigar boxes, boot;jack absconding
hirt-buttons whist and dominoes.
Shadows present-hoop skirts, baud-
boxes, CATERS, long stockings, Juvenile
dresses, little willow chairs, cradles
pap, sugar teats, paragoric, hive syrup,
soothing syrup, senna, salts, squills,
and doctors bills. Shadows future
more nine pound babies, moro hive
syrup, ETC., etc. III just tell YOU how
l got caught.
was always the darndest, most tea
custard, bashfal fellow you ever did
see; it was kinder in my line to be
taken with the shakes every time l saw
pretty gal approach me, and I'd cross
the street any time rather than face
one. Twasan't because I didn't like
the critters, for if I was behind fence
10 oki4g through aknot hole, I couldn't
10 ok at one long enough.
Well, my sister Lib, gave a party
one night, and I stayed away from
home because I was too bashful to
face the music. l hung around the
house, whistling Old Dan Tucker,
dancing to keep my feet warm; and
watching the heads bobbing up
and down behind the window curtains
and wishing the laundering party
would break up so l could get to my
room. smoked up bunch of cigars
and as it was getting late and mighty
uncomfortable, l concluded to shin up
the door post. No sooner said than
done, and I quickly found myself snug
in bed. <:Now," says !, flct her rip
dance till your wind gives out!' and
cuddling under the quilts, Morpheus
grabbed me.
was dreaming Of soft-shell crabs
and stewed tripe, and was having .
good time when somebody knocked at
the door and walked me up ''Rappe2'
again. laid low. crap, rap, rap I!
Then | heard Whispering and
knew there was whole raft of girls
outside.
crap, rapr'
Then Lib sings out
"Jack, are Won in there %
eyes," says I.
Then came roar of laughter!
''Let us inn says she.
81 wou't,'' says 1, "can't you let 6
fellow alone 90
care you a-bcd?" says she.
~ am" says I.
"Get up," says she.
t''l won't'saysI. I. Then came anoth
er laugh. BY thunder! began to GEL
rilcd.
Get out, you petticoated scare
crowsw l cried.
"Can't you get beau without haul
in fellow out of bed? l won't &C
home with you'll won't so You may
clear ont ?" Then throwing boot al
the door, felt better. But, present.,
oh! mortal buttons, I heard a still
small voice, very much like sister Lib's
and it said:
! "Jack, you'll have 10 get up, for al
the girls things are in there!''
Oh, lord, what pickle think of me
in bed all covered with shawls, muffs
bonncts and cloaks, and twenty girl:
outside waiting to get in +! If hat
stopped to think would have faintet
on the spot. As it was rolled on
among the bonnet wire and ribbons in
| hurry.
"Smashr" went the millinery il
every direction. I had to dress in th<
dark-for there was crack in th,
, door, and the girls sciH peek-and til.
: way | tumbled about was death or
straw hats. The critical moment came
l opened the door and found mysel
fright among the women.
" Oh, my leg-horn cries one," ssm,
dear darling winter velvet" erie:
another, and they pitched in-the,
pulled me this way and that, boxed m,
ears and one bright eyed little piec.
Il Sal -, her name was-put he
! arms right around my neck, aud kiss
E ed me right on my lips. Human ma
ture couldn't stand that and / give he
as good as she sent. It was the frs
time ever got a taste, and it wa
. powerful good. believe could hav
kissed that gal fro,n Julias Caesar til
= the Fourth of July. .~.ss .. 1872 ia
y Jack" says she, "we are sorry t
i disturb you, but won't You see M
: home % -0.-~a.sg =. rs 4sss'sc+ 4sss s.>@.-
r *Yes," said /, 81 will,"I did do j
l-Iand had another smack at the gate
r|too. $<s~s - &s2s~*s 50 Il = ~ 3'ss< ~
After that, we took turtle-dovin
8 after each other, and both Of rs sigi
cling like = barrel of new. cider .whe
y we were away from each other. z
III Twas at the close of glorious sun
81 mer day-the sun WAS setting benin
ia distant hog.pen-the chickens we,
l-Igosng to rocst-the bull frogs wer
lconmencing their evening songEth
N polly wogs in their native mud puddl.