New Oregon plaindealer. (New Oregon, Iowa) 1859-1866, 1862-11-07
A DIFFICULTY QUESTION AN
.. ..c.-esE All swERED. aE EI EasI.

Can anybody tell why, when Eve was
manufactured from one Of Adams ribs,
hired girl wasn't made at the same time to
wait on her !
We can, easy! Because Adam never came
whining to Eve with a ragged stock 'ng to be
darned, collar.string to be sewed, or a
glove to DO mended, right away, quick,
now! Because he never read the newspa-
per until the sun got down behind the palm
trees and stretched himself: yawning out
Saint supper most ready, my dear :"
Not he. He made tho fire and hung over
the kettle himself we'll venture, and pulled
III. radi.hes and peeled the bananas, and
did everything else that he ought to do! He
MIXED the cows and fed the chickens, aad
looked after the pigs himself. He never
brought home half u dozen friends to dinner
when Eve hadn' t any pomegranates and the
mango season was over He never stayed
until seven o'clock to a ward meeting for the
out and out candidate, and then scolded be-
cause poor Eve was crying inside the gates.
To lie sure he acted rather cowardly about
apple gathering time, but then that don't de-
preciate his helpfulness about the garden
He never played billiards, or drove fast
horses nor choked Eve with cigar sn,oke
He nevcr loafed around the groceries while
solitary Eve was rocking lit Gains cradle
At home. In short. he did not think she was
specially created for the purpose of waiting
on him, and wasn't under the impression
that it disgrac~d a man to tighten his wife's
cares little.
That's the reason that Eve did not need a
hired girl, and We wish it was ,sho reason
that none of her fair descendants did. :
..4~ A BUSINESS LETTER.
To the Editor of the- s-.se Es,a
SIR I'm moving aIong-slowly along
down tords my place. Iwsnt you to rite me
letter, saying how is the show business in
your place. My show at present consists of
thrco moral Bares, "a amaszin little Raskal
--twould make you laugh yourself to death
to see the little cuss jump up and squeal,) y
wax figures Of G. Washington, Gen. Taylor.
John Bunyan, Capt Kidd, and Dr.. Webster
it the act of KILN DR.. Parkman, besides sew.
eral MISCELLANEOUS moral wax statoos Of cele-
brnted piruts and murdcrers, &c, ekaled by
few and exceeded by none. Now Mr.. Editor
scratch off few lines sayin how is business
down to your place. shall have my hand
bills done at your o6ss-Depend upon it. 1
want you should git up my hapdbills in fla.
min stile. Also git up tremcnjus excite
ment in your paper bowt my Unparalleled
show. We must fetch the public somehow.
We must work on their feelins Cum the
moral on 'em strong. If it's temperance
community, tell 'em sined tho pledge df.
teen minutes atcr Ise born, but on tho conte-
ry, et your people take their tods, say Mis-
ter Ward is Jouial feller as we ever met,
full of conwiviality, & the life and soal Of the
Soshui Roard. Take, don't you? If you
soy enything bswt my show, say my snaiks
is-as harmless as the new born Babe. What
o interesting study to see zewologcal ami
NAL like sna,k under perfeck subjccksun.
My little Kangaroo is mos lafable little cuss
lever saw. All fer Is cents. I am anxeous
to skewer every inaooence. / repeat in re-
gard to them handbilIs, that shall get 'em
stru * orf up to your printin o6ss. My per-
iitercal sentiments agree with yourn exackly.
know they do becaws never saw man
whose didn't. ,...,s
Respectfully, yours.
wv