Smyrna times., 1862-05-01
5 ELEC T TORY.
BWITCHED.
by HATTIE TYING.

Marry for love, indeed, Tom, that does well
enough tor The beardless aud sentimental TO Ia TX
about, but I'm no believer in such nonsense
when marry, I'm going to marry by common
sense-and marry sensible woman, too"
Don't talk OF imposs:biIity, Ned" inter
upted Tom Flanders, twirling the lasseIs of s
dresslng-gown over his fingers, and biting his
whlshers.
al was born in New York, educated at Har.
ward, made my debut in society at Newport
have haunted Saratoga, West Point, and NlaGa.
ra, for five years-have travelled Throughout,
Europe, Asia, and Africa and the only sens,ble
women l ever saw, are those widows some.
where of there, who burn themselves on their
huband's funeral bonfire"
'ln what are they sensible, pray -
:" In relieving the world Of their presence at
the earliest possible moment
"Wretch! haven't you sister!"
Yes, dozen Of them-He4ven help me -
"Were you ever in love, Tom %
"a thousand times, more or less; don'tknow
the time when I've ever been out more than
twenty -four hours at time, SINCE my mother
put me into breeches. Like Festus"
| cannot live unless love and am loved
Unless have the young and beautiful
Bound up like pictures in my book Of life
0 Ned. when you begin TO talk OF love, YOU
drive me into the regions of ecstasy; you brrop
TO my mind my irstlove Miss Popkins, with her
beautifully .varegated face, and corn.colored
hair; thoughts also OF Susanna Potiphar, who
used to make me such delicious catnip tea fol
the headache, rush over me like flood, and
drown my"
Hold, Tom, hold! your ordinary talk is ha I'd
enough TO endure, but your eloquence, angel.
and mlniste 8 OF grace defend us ="
:" You wish to have a horrible accident oc.
cur IN your sanct1m-do you not ! and thus
get your name in the papers-it's your only
chance OF ever getting it there; but shall no.
explode toryour benefit, my beloved friend, and
you know shall certainly do so, unless give
vent to the tide Of resistess eloquence which
is yelling up within me-let me alone"
go on. then. I'll take a nap while you
get through, wake me when you've fairly
. lnished.'
! ITO begin where left off; thoughts of Jane
Wilkins, also, come, as Of yore. upon me, anc
can wake my heart with recollectlons of hel
looks, until my adoroble Jane
Even at moments think can see
Some living thing love, but none like thee
Jane had the most magnificent squint, but he
freckles could not compare 10 size or brillanct
Of color with those of Matilda Spitfre, the gir
| pursued for seven long years, and who pur
sued me for seven long years longer, with sher
ifis and cOnstables, and writs, and other thing
appertaining 20 cases OF breach of promise. {
Matilda! Matilda!
They say that absence conquers love,
But, oh believe it not,
I've tried alas! it's power 10 prove
but thou and the thousand dollars damage
that everlastingly confOunded court granted l.
you, for the damages which my kisses had in
iicted upon your thin lips, are not forgot"
"Come, Tom, Job could not endure this-si
lence. or I'll expel you from the sanclum wit
a writ of habeas boo;-leather.'"
"Then comes thoughts ofangelic Lyra Lyrc
the romantic; who was an honorary membe
Of the Sleepy Hollow Big Foot Society, an
whose face was the color of ashes Of roses, IN
nus the roses; you are married now. Matilda
, to gentleman 10 the soap business, and or
the happy mother of a NUMEROUS rising genera
/, tion. Peace TO thy sshes!"
Z" TON, this will never do you must be bled.
"Fm no client OF yours; you've no right
bleed me; aud Ned, do you know why CAV
you that puff yesterday, in my paper, as bein
/ most Christian geDtlemsn1"
e SNOW you talk sensibly--why was it?"
Because you fulfil Scripture in Just or
point; yon never see stranger but what yC
take him in"
= "That's slightly personals / prefer to ha,
you 60 back to your auours, if you leave The