The Cadiz Democratic sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1854-1864, 1862-11-12
FnesTA MARp.
Treating Of as NodlSS Red 9faa-D Domestic
A6airs--A Serenaie: etc,

Bernely ne was = majestic cuSS-
At the time Chris Rrrove on these shore.
UnlOOdltO chIis, collmbus,) the savjn wal
virsoous and happy. They were innocent o
secession. rum, drawpOksr. and sinfulnes:
giuirsiiy- They didn't discuss the slavery
question as custom. They haa no Con
gress. arobanks, delirium tremeus, or Asso,
ciated Press. Their habits were consequently
good. Late suppers, dyspepsy, gas companies
thieves, ward politicians, pretty waiter.
girls, and other metropolitan iefnements
were unknown among them. No savage in
good standing would take postage stamps
You couldn't have bot cOon skin with .
bArrell of'em. The female aboorygiEe never
died Of consumption, because she didn't tie
her waist up in whalsbons things; but in
loose fowin' garmints she bounded with ma
ked ieet, over the hill and plains like be free
and risky antelope. 1t was onlucky mo.
msnt for US when Chris. sot his foot on this
ERE shores. 1t would have been better for
usofthe present day it the Injins had given
him warm meal aud sent him home Ger
the sgin bilers. For the savages owned the
country. and Columbus was fillibustsr.--
Cortex. Pixarro, aud Walker were one horse
fiilhbusters, Columbus was four horse team
fillibnstsr, and . large yallsr dog under the
wagon. I say, in view Of the mess We are
making Of things. it would have been better
for us il Columbus had sts,d to home. The
circulation OF Fanitv Fan would bs larger,
and the proprietors would all have bOozum
pinsl Yes sir, and perhapss ten pin alley.
by which don't wish to bs understood
as intimatin' that the scaipin wtetehes who
are in the Injin bisniss al the present day
are Of any account, or calculated to make
home happy, specially the Sioux oil MINES
eta, who deserve to be murdered in che 6rst
degree, and Il Pope will only stay in st.
Paul and not 60 near them himself reckon
they will bs.
Things in our town is workin. The canal
boat Lucy Ann called in here the other day
ard reported all quiet on the Wabash. The
Lucy Ana has adopted 9 new style of Bin
nekle light, in the shape of a red-headed
gsl who site up over the compass. 1t works
we'll.
The artist spoke Of in my last, has re
turned to Philsdplphy. Before he left |
took his lilly white hand IN miae. sug
gested to him If he could snducs the citizens
ot-ihiladeiphy 70 believe that it would be
good idea to have white window-shutte on
their houses and white door-stones, he might
makesa fortiR. Tess novelty added,
and may startle 'em at fust, but they might
conclood to adopt it, .-a..
As several OF our public men are constant
ly being surprised with serenadss, conclu-
ded I'D be surprised in the same way, so
made arrangements sccordin'. l asked the
Brass Band how much they would take, to
take me entirely by surprise with serenadc.
They said they'd oyerwhem with an uuex-
pectcd honor for seven dollars, which ex.
septed. 2zel a..
lwroto out my impromtoo speech several
days beforehand, bein' very eiul to ex.
punge all lngrammaticisms aud payin' par
ticular attention to the punktooation. III
was, il may say it without eglits1n, q man
ly effort but alars! never delivered 1t, as
the seksl will show you. paced up and
down the kitchen speakin' my piece over so
asto bs entirely perfsck. My bloomin' young
daughter Sarah Ann, bothered me summit
by singin.--tWhy do summer roses fade?'
because. said I, after hearing her sing it
about fourteen times, because it's their biz
Lot 'em fade sa
Betsy said I, pausin in the middle OF the
room and letting my eagle eye wander from
the manuscript: Betsy, on the night of this
here serenade, a desires you to appear at the
winder dressed in white, and wave . lilly
white hankerchsr. Dye hear?'
III appesr,, said that remarkable female,
Il shall wave lilly white bucket OF bilin' hot
water, and somebody will be scalded. Ono
bull headed old fool will get his share I
She retsr'd to her husband; no doubt about
Il in my mind. But for fear she might ex.
Asperate me said nothin'.
The expected night cum. At 0 o'clock
precisely, there were sounds Of footsteps in
the yard, and tie Band struck up a lively
Dir, which whom they did finish it, there
were criss of'Wardp 'Ward!' I slept out
onto the portico. A brief glance showd me
that the assemblaso was summit mixed
There was great many ragged boys, and
there was quite o number Of grown up per.
Sons evidently under the influence Of the in.
loxicatin' bole, The Band was also drunk.
Dr.. Schwazsy, who was holding up post
seemed to be partic'ly drunk--so much SO
That it had got into his spectacles, which
were staggerin' wildly over bis nose. But
wsS I'M forit, and I commenced thus:
'Feller. Citizens; For this unexpected honor
Lsadsr cfds Band--Will you give us our
money now or wait till you get through?
To this painful and disgustin' interruption
] paid no attention. as - a
s'-----for this unexpected honor thank
you.' yse
Leader efM the Band--But you said you'd
give US seven dollars il we'd play two
choons.
Again don't notice him, but resumed as
follows: 4 say thank you warmly. When
I look at this crowd OF true Americans, my I
heart swslls---'
Dr.. Schwazey--So do II
"A Koice-- We all do!
'a---my heart swells--'
Il Koice--Three chaars for fha swAlls