Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-04-26

Fact, Fancy and Fun.

Fact, Fancy and Fun.
With many people it is as difficult
to live .oithia their income 80 ,eithouf
it. s-t--.- -.
-Promissory notes-Tuning the.
fddles before the performance begins.
WE suppose that man tha. never
speaks may be said always to keep his
word. -
There is current belief that
wolf is never more dangerous Than
when he feels sheepish.
~ c';, your wife il not so pcnsive
"a she used to be-" '.No, she has left
that off, and turned expensive"
Some persons seem TO obey liter.
allv the injunction, ''Held fast the
ruth; = they never allow it to escape
| them. - .s.......
We often hear Of run on the
banks. The rebels are now ON a run
from Banks.
Some animals won't fight until
they are driven to day, We guess the
rebels won. fight much till they are
driven to the gulf.
We don't think there will be mnch
of a crop of ebels the next season,
though all that We now see are re.
markably ssedy. e
will the rebels ever fad strong.
holl strong enough to hold (? @1
Perhaps the reason why all the
rebel troops are turning their backs
on ns Is because they are getting hear.
tily ashamed to show their faces
If McClellan's troops are the fo,c-
er of the army the brave Western boys
that have done the fighting of late must
be the fruit Of the army.
1t used to be the boast Of Stephen
A. Douglas that he could make any,
thing in the way Of cabinet ware. We
do not beiiesr chat Fiuy,i, or Wise, or
Pillow. though app, en,iced to a cabi.
net maker for seven years, could make
u stand.
What are you looking after, my
daughter ?'' said an old gentleman at =
Christmas party. Looking after
son-in-law for you, father'
Floyd complain. that he is unjust.
y treated. We are disposed to reply
Ill the language of the Rev. Mr.. Spur.
ge"n: What, out OF hell, aud com.
plain !" .rs
-.'Dost thou clean my furniture,
fair hanl-maiden ?" asked x Of pref.
ty servant who was polishing his escri.
toire. =" l dust" replied the hand
maiden.
Who are the sweetest folks -
Lasses.
Very few diseases are SO msrtal a.
the fear Of death. -
"A dull and plausible man, like an
unrltled gun, is smoo tn bore.
Good company and good conyer.
sation are the best sinews of virtue.
Love is the seraph faith and hope
are but the wings by which it flies.
Mems lusts are their gods on earsk
but they are their devils in he'll
When we read the almost inter-
ninable sentences Of some writefa, we
canno; hel !, thinking that their readers
are in danger OF being senteEced TO
death.
-Over-warm friendships, like hot
pc. atoes, are quickly dropped.
Every Cook should circnmnavigate
the world OF kitchen literature.
1t is bean,y's privilege to kill time,
and times privilege to kill beauty.
They say at death we just begin
to hve-that we lie down in the grave
just to take BREATH.
"A widow, whose lands supply q
rich grazing for thousand cattle is an
attractive grass-w;dow.
-Dandies and nany-goats never fai,
to pride themselves upon theit kids.
The crow IL brave bird be rev.
er shows the white feather. -u~.
The mieer Is wretch who starves
himself in one world to be damned in
another.
| The man who ate his dinner with
the fork Of a river has been attempting
to spin mountain top.
I
To make yoar coat last, avoid us.
ing it to make your virtues endure,
use them continually.
old age is a relentless tyrant; he
forbids the pleasures Of youth on pain
of death.