Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-07-12
Fact, Fancy and Fun.

Fact, Fancy and FUN.
| rSIl4& .Ad1 - -Eg6 eos
Speak not, rather than speak i'll.
| To pay all your debts-7-commit debts sui.
oS : ~ aziv'I l. Ra9zili9 9d4 o rufra
TO, tell if eggs be good--male
them into custard.
The proper, arms for rebel priva-
teersman-yard arms. -
TO drive away musquitoes-take
after them with a shot gun. -
Girls play beautifully upon pianos,
and our soldiers upon forts. :
.-Forgiveness is the odor which
flowers yield when tranpled upon.
j ohm. Smith is said to have died
lately, in New York, at an advanced
age. oF aa ,9oi,aG edl To sa4TTas
aJ-To behold the wicked flee-light
a candle and diligently search your
night dress. 5rr1ea gti q as{erizze=
The Missouri Repu6zican says the
Ram is no longer a sign in the Confed-
crate zodiac. 80. - z.Ise-
Ii, Who makes the best soldiers :?
Dry, goods men-they are the most &C.
customed to drilling. -
DO not all you can, spend not all
that you have, believe not all that YOU
hear, and tell not all that you know.
z i-Cobwebs and spiders webs accu.
mulate very fast in stores where the
proprietors do not advertise their
Hli business .7aa 10 enoi4iggm .aonsssa
"A dentist advertises that he will
insert teeth cheaper than anybcdy else.
He might find a bulldog who would do
it still cheaper.
An exchange says that we are
pressing the rebels hard upon the Mis-
sissippi. We seem to be using
"Ramage press.' '4 + bas
72@-T'here. now," cried little girl
while rummaging q asdrawer in bureau,
''there now gran-pa has gone to Heaven
without his spectacles.' .- So
In the education of youth, we
should give heed TO the minutest influ-
ences, as we save the filings of gold
and the dust Of diamonds.
The Oldest piece of furniture is
the multiplication table, It was con-
structed more than two thousand years
ago, and is yet as good as new.
There is not stream of trouble
so deep and swift running that we may
not cross safely over if we have cour-
age to steer and strength to pull.
Many of the prpers ask, "Where;;.
oh, where has Beauregard's army
gone ?" A considerable portion has
gone into Gen. Halleck's big bag.
"A dutchman being called upon to
give toast, said: ssHere ish to de he
roes what fit, plet, and died at the bat.
tie Of Bull Run-of which Use one.'
Don't wait for your fever to cool
before you act. The workman at a.
foundry might as we'll wait for the
molten iron to cool before pouring, it
into the mould. -
Temperance puts coal on the Fire,
meal in the barrel, -four in the tub,
money in the purse, credit in the coun-
try, contentment in the house, clothes
on the children, intelligence in the
brain, and spirit in the whole constitu-
ton. #
1T is no credit to a man to have It
truly said of him-''He has not an enc
my in the world" Such a sentence
would do very we'll to engrare upon
the tomb stone of an infant or an idiot,
but it is far from being complimentary
to a man. 4s~
-"Sambo, whar you get that watch
you wear to meetin' last Sunday 2"
ssHow you know I had a watch ?"
"Because seed de chain hang dit dc
pocket in 'front.' $50 way niggerl
S'pose you see halter round'lny neck,
YOU tink dar is horse inside ob me ?''
"A speaker at meeting in Siskiyou,
saysa California paper, gave the follow.
ing information touching John China
mans characteristics and organ:--
s:They are fire-cracking, going poun-
ding, thundergustical species Of the
ourang -outang, produced by the angry
rays Of the sun upon the green scum
of the worlds swill-tub.:
DoN'T EAT GREEN PoTAroEs. .--The
eboots nf n,tofoas ovp0sed to liQbk