Lamoille newsdealer. [volume] (Hyde Park, Vt.) 1860-1877, 1862-05-16
y. HOWARD, Jr., Publisher.

got through with them very well. The
fact is, doctor, l have got an excellent Con.
stitution.
DR.. E. That's fact, my dear sir, and
l haven't the slightest doubt that it will
carry you safely through the present diff
Guilty.
U. s. I hope 50.
DR.. Z. But you seemed to be troubled
in your mind. If is Of no use to give you
medicine while you are worrying and fret
ting. If you are sick, you must lay aside
everything and make it business of
getting we'll.
U. s.. Well, we'll, that is all very true,
but you can't always do it.
DIR. E. But you must do it. What is
the dificultye A man in your circum-
stances ought not to be in trouble. Here
you have got one of the finest farms in
the world, reaching from the Atlantic to
the Pacific. You have got money enough,
and your neighbors and friends all over
the world admire and respect you. Then
you have large family of children.
U. S. There's the trouble. l might
as we'll out with it. (Energetically.) }
There's family quarrel brewing.
D. E. You astonish me, my dear sir.
U. S. Some of my girls are determined
to break up the family, and set up house
keeping themselves. Why, they are actu.
ally getting up a Irritation with the Brit.
ish Lion and French Eagle, and mean to
run away and leave me
DR.. Z. That's too bad wouldn't
stand it my dear sir.
US. What would you do?
DR.. E. Do? Put them on the sick
list, and turn them over to me. I'll cure
them for you,
T.. But how?
DIR. f. I'll shut them up in theil
chambers, and feed them on pork scraps
and mush, hoe-cake and hominy. Pu
them on short diet; that will bring then
to their senses. I'll shut them up, anG
neither John Bull nor Johney Crapear
shall see them. Will they firt then?
U. S. Perhaps not.
DR.. L. Then I'll physic 'em. III
give 'em pills--oxyde of iron-sulphur-
nitre-saltpetre-tar, pitch and turpen
tine I'll pour the whole materia medics
down their throats. I'll bleed, amputate
trepan, cauterize, blister, I'll
U.S.. Come, come, doctor. you ar,
getting excited.
DR.. E. Excited9 IT'S enough to ex
cite stole. Here I've watched ever tn,
health of this family for years and years
and now do you think am going to le
them all die on my hands?
CENTER CAROLINE GEoReIANA, ALLIE BAL
MY, FLORA DEE, Mrs. SoIpIo, LOUISA
ANNA, MISS L. STAR)
Car. We have called to inform 20,
that we are about to leave the family, sir
DIR. E. Are you, indeed
Car. In fact, doctor, we have left.
DR.. E. Are you not ashamed of your
self to treat this worthy old gentleman il
this unhandsome manner?
Car. (Contemptuously.) Pray, sir
who are you?
DR.. E. Who am I? Well, that's cool
My name is Eagle. 1 have watched owe
this family fer some time I have rejoic
ed with it in prosperity and mourned will
it in adversely. l have always felt al
interest in it; In short, claim to be on
of the family. Who am |? My name j
Eagle, in word, the American Eagle.
Car. The matter dosen't concern you
sir. You are sentimental fop. Yo'
post yourself in prominent places, ant
crow very loudly, but you are Of small
account.
DR.. E. That's candid. But let u
talk over this matter. What are 20,
going to leave the family for9
Car. Because have been abused an,
treated in the most shameful manner b.
the old gentleman, and by my cold blood
ed sisters.
DR.. Z. 1t is little singular that
- :. .~l...1 .-xxkL.rx ~ tha bind