Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1862-01-11
Fact, Fancy and Fun.

Jean IauI says love NAV SlunbcT
IN lady's heart, but it always dreams.
The branch Of culture most popu.
lar with the F. +. V.'s--Hauclty cul-
tuYe.
What is rest? Leaving the choir
10 eat refreshments during sermon
time.
Tile man that was in the habit of
blowing his own praise, gave the ear
ache to his neighbors.
A tair cxchange-English pouas3s
for American graia5. We take them
without any ScrupIes.
II you wish to get rich, get nau-
ried. When vas honey ever made
with one bee in the hive.
IL 6 righteous cause brings you
into suffering, q righteous God will
bring YOU out Of suffering.
On what ground NAY coufcctions
be deemed mercenary lovcrs2 Be
cause they sell their "kisscs"
"A Yankee in Iowa mas taught
ducks to swim in hot water with such
success that they lay boiled eggs.
a contemporary has been study
ing foootophy. Here is a specimen
"Wat kant be ord must b ndurd.'
The good deeds that most sons
prefer that their fathers should leave
behind them, are real estate deeds.
Why should potatoes grow better
than other vegetables? ? because they
have eyes to see what they are doing.
IT exercise promotes health, those
who collect old bills for editors should
be among the longest lived people on
earth.
A Christian, when he comes into
the WorlI, lives to die again but when
he goes ont Of the world, he dies to
live again.
Il have turned many & woman's
head" boa&ted Z young nobleman of
France. yes" replied Talleyrand,
'away from YOU"
a country paper describing burn
ing fluid accident, says Of the party in.
iured Her hand and leg, up to her
knees, We're burned"
A Clergyman in Boston preached.
Christmas Eve, Oh "'Iho End Of the
World aQont l86&68" Discouraging
to young people, isn't it
--Ij~ijgion is the basis upon which
civil government rc>ts--that from which
power derives lis authority, laws thcir
efficacy, and hoti tEeir sanction.
--Roc@~t T2ichmonl papers an
nounce that the courts are actively en-
ga@cd in %pqnestrating the debts due
il the South to Northern merchants.
In these days, when sacks are
fashionable female dresses, . gentle.
mau may be !hantful to the lady who
giy2a him the sach--anj It's contents.
u yonng anI beautiful dans"l,
having two lovers, and not knowing
which to prefer, settled the matter by
marrying one and cloping viii. the 9th.
Or.
An exchange says that "with wash,
ing 7a3 sewing machines, blby jumpers,
IRISH wa;tars, big hotels, &c, We Shall
have 10 necessity for women whatey-
cr."
An English editor acknowledges
gilc receipt eta bottle Of brandy, forty
eight years Old, and 4aye-"This bran
dy is 50 very Old we fear it cannot
keep much longer"
DO yon understand me now ?"-
a country petagogue to an
urc!in to whose head he threw an ink
stand. "l've got an ink ling Of wAa.
you nean," replied the boy.
-s.Tsa, :" said lad to his father, 81
often real Of people poor but honest;
why don't they sometimes say ricA but
honest ?-"Tut, my son." said his faith,
CT, ''nobody would believe Them"
4 voter in Sierra county Cal, was
and about to swear his vote
in when the election Judge 2ngrilv
cried out, "Take off your hat; haven't
you no respect for me nor God AL
mighty: :"
two acquaintanccs meeting on q
wet day, one greeted the other with
''Bvaatiful rain this fetching things
out Of the ground" Second friend dis
coa<olatcIy: "IIope not, SIR, hope not;
got two wives there, sir.
A short time ago a man became
50 complrtclx ''wrapped in thought"
.hat he va, ted up, labeled, and sent
of ~ The strain of ideas"
Later.-Th" train has run Of the track
AMI smashed up IN quag,nire.