The Wyandot pioneer. (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1853-1868, 1861-11-08
gMistellal@eolls,
How Jim Blander Sailed and
Pickeled the Quaker Friend.
A Story of Our Own Times.

There lived in certain neighborhood
MOI far distant from here, a registering
rowdy bully, Jim Blander. Jim was
sum in fight, kind Of pugilistic Ma
poleon. Many and bloody were the af.
fairs he had had in his life time, and had
Invariably come off best. Jim not only
considered himself invulnerable, but all
the fighting characters in the surrounding
country conceded that it was no use in
fighting Jim, as he was considered to be
a patent threshing machine, that could
not be improved on. In Jim's neighbor
hood had settled quite number of Qua
kers. From some cause or other, Jim
hated the "shad bellies" as he called
them, with his entire heart; he often de-
clare d that to whip one of these inoffen-
sive people, would be the crowning glory
of his life. For years Jim waited for a
pretext. One of Jim's chums overheard
a young Quaker speak in disparaging
terms Of him. The report soon came to
Jim's ears not little magnifed. Jim
made desperate threats what be was 20
ing to do with Nathan, the meek folloue
of Penn, on sight; besides various bruis-
es and contusions he meant to inflict on
Nathan's body, in his chas.e language,
be meant to "gouge out" both his eyes
and ''chew off both his ears
Nathan heard of Jim's threats and We,
ry properly kept out of his way, hoping
that time would modify Jim's anger. 1t
seems, however, this much to be desired
result did not take place. One day friend
Nathan was riding out, and in passing
through long lane, when about mid
way he espied Jim entering the other end
Nathan might have turned and fed, but
his flesh rebelled at this proceeding. II
will pursue my way peacefully said tie
Quaker, and l hope the better sense oi
the man of wrath, will not permit him to
molest me, or do violence to my person.
Nathan's calculations as to the lamb like
qualities of his adversary were doomed
to be disappointed.
go, no." thought bully, as he recog.
nized Nathan, 81 have him at last. Now
I'll make minee meat Of shad belly. I'll
salt him and pickle him too
I "Wilt thou please dismount from thy
horse ?" said Jim, seiz'ng the bride Of
Nathan's horse, and mimcking his style
"My soul yearneth above all things tc
give thee the biggest mawling ever man
received"
"Friend James, replied Nathan, "thou
must not modest me, but let me go on my
way in peace. Thy better judgment viii
surely tell thee that thou canst not be
benefited by personally injuring me-
"Get thee down, in a moment" de
manded Jim; ''get down, you canting
lying, mi schief making hypocrite. II
drag you down, if you don't dismount.
"Friend James, I demonstrate agains
thy proceeding and thy language" re
piled Nathan. "My religion teaches mt
sincerity: I am neither a liar, mischie
maker, nor hypocrite, | am no coward
but a man of peace; I desire to pursue
my way quietly, let me pass on
"Get down." persisted jim; "dowr
with you; l want to beat some of you
religion out of you. l think by the time
I'm through with you, you'll pass for
tolerably decent man: I'll teach you
short and easy lesson on the importanc
of minding your own business, and tn
risk you run in slandering your neigh
5ors.'
: 81 will not dismount," said Natha
firmly, "looseu thy hold from the bride.
"You won't, won't you,' said Jim
y 'sthen here goes" and be made a des
e perate plunge to collar the Quaker.
n Nathan was on his feet in an instant
n on the opposite OF the horse. The Qua
: ker, although of smaller proportions tha
!" his prosecutor, was all sinew and mu:
1t Gle, and his well knit form denoted bot
strength and activity.
"Friend James," he impiored, 18th
pertinacious persistence in persecutin
me, is annoying; thee must desist, {
IS peradventnre l may SO far forget myse
10 as to do thee some bodily HARM
in "By snakes" said Jim, coming up
St ward Nathan, Il believe there is fig
in enough in 'broadbrim' to make the affa
n interesting. I wish some of the bo,
y, were here to see the fun. Now frier
n. Nathan, l am going to knock off the CT
of your nose; look OUT
Suiting the action to the word, Jil
:. after various pugilistic girations with L
~ fists, made scientific blow at the mas
y formation of our Quaker friend; but To
~ Hyer couldn't more scientifically ha
'i' warded it off.
Jim was evidently disconnected at t