The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1861-01-17
FAIRS AND FESTIVALS.

| we nave nesitated somewhat De10re
handing the following cariacture, on q
growing custom. to the printer. But it is
not more ridiculous than some things we
have seen connected With attempts to
raise the wind, and so it is voted to zap
pear"
Hannah, an aunt OF ours, lived out of
| town.
/ "Did l never tell you what time |
had at our church last winter 7" said she
to me one evening.
"No! What Of it"
"Now, amt that strange! Thought
had told everybody about it. to be sure.
La. well, twill be news to you, then -
You know Nora Thorudale, Judge Thorn
dale's dsrter. She came over to our
house, and said our congregation were
going to have fair in the village meet.
in house !"
"Du tellP' sez I. who's going to
preach r.
"Ol" said she, mighty smiling, I'VE
amt goin' to have preachiD'. A few
young persons of the congregation, who
seem to take a deeper interest in the
ehurcb's welfare than the members them
selves, desire to purchase a few indispen-
sable articles for the meetin house and
We thought if all the church would pre-
sent Us cakes and pies, and meats and
such things, we would appoint night to
sell them in the vestry of the church, and
take the proceeds to buy the necessary
things. The plan is we'll received, espe-
cially BY the young. Yo know the mon
ey is to be spent for charitable purposes,
and on that account everything given Us
will sell for double its value"
"Well, I wouldn't have believed that
there was SO much wisdom left in the
world to have cupjured up that" seq l.
"'Tis even SO, said Nora, "and what
viii you givel You live on a farm and
farmers produce lots of things that would
be acceptable.
"Well, | will give two roast turkeys,
and six roa't chickens" seq [, thinking
that that would be as much as anybody
could expect these hard times.
"Um Well. what else! It's for the
church you give it, you know. Church
mem oers should not be less anxious for
its interests than those who are not
You see I was a church member, and
she wasn't.
"Well, l will give jar Of peach JAM"
seq l.
'Tbat will help along some. A few
bushels of apples, or a roast pig, would
be acceptable"
She was so ravenous, began to be
sorry I'd offered ber anything. How
souever. I promised the pig and apples.
"Of course you will give Us cheese, and
pies, and cakes, and milk, and cream,
and then | think you vii! have done your
part at giving. By the way, we are to
have historical tableaux, and Mrs Amos
Bruce wanted you to take the part of the
Witch of Endor All you will have to do
will be to dress to represent that lady,
and stand perfectly still behind curtain;
and people will pay something to see you.
You will act the part | know you WILL"
Wal, rs old and ignorant, and didn't
know what | was about, SO [ consented.
l sent them the pig aud the turkeys. and
the chickens and apples, and all the rest of
the things wanted, up to the meetin house
the day before the fair.
The next dag my husband tackled up
his old horse and chaise to carry me to
the fair. Our old chaise, somehow or 9th
er, don't look very we'll. There arc holes
iD the top and sides, and some of the
.pokes OF the wheels are gone The wheels
squeak powerfully, too. Wal. We hadn't
but just got into town, when it seemed as
if all the boys out of Jail came hollerin'
and hoottin' after US.
"Hurrah for the Witch of Endor Her
majesty approacheth Make way for
her majesty !"
DO ask them unsigbtly critters to be
civil" seq | to my husband-"my pa
tienee is gone entirely"
At that he clu bered out of the ebaise,
and after en- lik-er te.split, tight as he
could leg it, Aud @! he dropped the
reins on the ground, and the old horse
took notion to 60, and he went You
see be knew the way to the church, and
be went. Husband he came hollerinl
whoa whoa !" just as | was ridin' up
to the Deetin house. The meetin' house
yard was full of folks laughn' and starin'
as if they haDd't got no respectable in um.
| got out of the chaise and made my way
through the crowd, and they wouldn't
make room, and ebowed them right
snartly I'm desput thin of flesh, and
when hit um, they'd give back as if
they'd teen stuck with dagger.
Paid twenty cents to 60 into the church;
the table inside did look beautiful. No.
ra explained the fxins to me. There
were grab boxes that contained hun.
dred things worth one cent, and one thing
worth ten; you paid FIVE cents grab, and
If you grabbed right, you would get your
moneys worth. Aud there was ring
cake; it was divided into fifteen slices
you paid dollar slice, aud one slice
contained a ring worth dollar. So be
that got the right slice got ring. And
there were guess cakes, and ever SO many
l.. e al. frA