Shreveport daily news., 1861-08-07
Sl1ght1y Gent,

q am one Of those awkward persons
that will sometimes occur, like acci-
dents, even in tho best regulated fam
lies, who are eternally," las my
wife has it wanting to know what
people said. Not that am inquisi-
tive beyond the common order Of
things; but it is my misfortune to be
slightly deaf: tits excessively pain
full to a man Of my years and family
to know to what an extent the opin-
ION Is current among my friends that
I could hear as we'll as any body if /
pleased. Only yesterday, as Buggs
was walking past my house, he over
heard mc reproving my son Charles
for elevatiny his voice to a murder
iirc-and-thieves pitch in addressing
me; though, being but Il lad Of four
years or less, he can't be expected to
know any better; which apology can
hardly be adopted by certain very
offensive older heads could mention
Bugs, L say, hearing this, becomes
incredulous forthwith (tor the tittieth
time during our six months acquail-
tance,) and declares emphatically
that 1t is an utter impossibility for
any person to pull wool over his on
tics to that extent that he can he made
to believe Bykes is deaf
Nonsense!" says Buggs, gestic-
ulating impatiently with his left hand;
"no more hard OF hearing than that
stick, Sir--not Il bit.''
.AIlusion is here made to Mr..
Haggs's walking stick, supposed to
be an uncommonly sharp stick (no
intentions ct a pun, only suspicious
OF Il sword-cane,l and consequently
capable OF extraordinary acoustic
teats.}
# there is anvthin" in human VA
turc tlr;lt l especial. y detcst, it is hyp-
,ocriSy. | would rather have a man
spit il my face than call me a hypo-
critic. | don't care what gentle euph-
emism be employs: asafrtida by
any other name would smell as aw-
full a hypocrite is a hypocrite,
whether you told him OF it by say
ing that he pretended to be dcater
than he is, or'by calling him outright
a wolf in Sleeps clothing. Perhaps
| am too sensitive in this particular;
| can't help it if l am. nave lealn-
ed to subduc and control my pas
sioMs, but | can't get over this ss.nsi-
tlveness. l can refrain from knock
ing my friend down when he SAYS.
"Psllaw Bykes, you're not so deat
as you seem - but | cant refrain
from wincing.
| have made careful calculation,
and | have concluded that l probably
do not represent less than seven chou
sand Of my telIow-countrymen, (aud
wonen-biess them y in my position,
here in this publication, as a misun.
derstood and ill-treated slightly dear
person. On behalf. therefore, of this
large body of people, by me repre-
sented, l propose to show that in my
(our) case the deuce-and-all is not So
black as he is painted.
1 took dinner with my friend Sac
ques, one day last summer, at his tru-
ly boardingplace in the country
Sacqucs is a well-meaning fellow, and
has talent in the poetical way; but
he is very much retired in his man
ners, personally. Fond OF society,
possessing an appreciative sense OF
feminine aesthetics, not aware that he
is himself bad to look at. but at the |
sah'e time with Il strong antipathS to
the attraction of any undue attention |
toward his end Of the table l dis
covered this latterfact by the bushes
that sutfused his pleasant countcn-
ance when he Introduced me to
chair at the dining-table-takinS spe-
cial care to Introduce me to nobody |
else--and by the anxious sidc-long
glances he gave me during the early