Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1853-1862, 1861-07-17
The Speaking at Fay etteviIIe

age to myself ] and my eldest dauter, Mary Ann,
the victims, and my wife and buggy and a
Wagon and some harness and horse and divers
trihes such as sliced ham, bread and pickles and
forth, were the collateral victims as you merchants
call tin Gods truth it is Hi of mess alto
gsther, shsmng US in our eyes, and that is the
worst shame, except being naked in q crowd.
Mary Ann spent S4:75 in little fimsy tricks not
worth curse snyhow-then she SGT EN- on her
petteoat tail she sot 'em around her neck; she
sot 'em around her ankles and then the remainder
she sot around her waist and arms. She looked
like big Gobl er on struting expedition in aprile
l hired u horse and buggy, and to make the war
runty good on the horse, hired his owner to drive
the horse DIN him. ne fully warranted TO
stand heap of stomping and great deal of cheer
ing these being, as thought the principal dangers
to be encountered at POLKs speaking at FSyette-
Vile Very well, l live on Cane Greek, and Cane
Greek horse can't be expected to know.much about
steam mac hinry generally, or Locomotives in par
ticulAr; even if be was used to much noise and
great deal of cheering. Now l didn't make my
contract to ever the case at all, as the end will
show clearly. 1t should have kivered Locomotives
and Jack asses and not much stomping and great
deal of cheering.
Well after settling Mary Ann and the driver safe
in the buggy, accompanied by horse warranted
not to skeer at much stompIng and great deal of
cheering. hitched pair of two year old steers
spotted on the sides and red the back with twisted
tails and curly heads, (they warnt exactly steers
either,) to my two horse Wagon. Iput in plank
bottom and sides, heap of rye straw, three split
bottom cheers, the dinner and the jug, Il call it
Black Betsey to distinguish it from the old woman,
for ID if she amt rather Jealous of that old
Jug any how. l sat on the tail board in 'front.' and
held the ropes and six foot hickory wythe twisted
in hot ashes the old woman CHATS my wife) and
my son John, (called after me you know,) and he
is a horse of a son on vituals and lighting and
HI on hens nestes and harmony generally
and then we started for Fayetteville to hear las
ID fool as am thought to to be hear) JAS. X Polk
speak. The Buggy with my presiOus daughter
MARY ANN, the driver and the horse with slim sOt
up ears and a rather bald name and tail and war
ranted mind you to stand any amount of stOmpng
and cheering, took the lead the steers (they are
not exactly steers either) followed after hauling
me and the jug and the dinner, and my namesake
son JOIN, and the wagon and the wythe and the
w-and-snd-oh yes, had like to forgot the
old woman, Chats my wife you know
We Travelled right peart The Horse warranted !
q
cheering racked along like he was all right, but
noticed sign didn't like much, he kept his ears |
sot straight up together little back of perpin |
dicular, just like a mule fixes his when he is
studieng devilment and he persistently switched |
that bald tail of his like the Breech bands had burs
under them, but he wus warranted. to stand much |
stomping and great deal Of cheering.
So drove the steers (they are not exactly steers
,;tl \ "A I'll ont OCh
of Fayetteville, when locomotive opened hole |
where along its back, and shot up into the air
a white plume, as big as four year old peach |
tree, and soon after that astounding phenomena,
Ito the horse warranted to stand much stOmping |
and great deal of cheering) there struck all our
astonished ears scream a howl, wall, seasoned
with grunt, that might have come from the
damned or a regiment of dogs with a split stick on
the tails of every of them. Now that ID
horse, warranted to stand much stomping and
great deal of cheering, wouldn't stand this, so he
just set in to keeping time to that good Id Cane
Greek tune, "Oh she woudent and she coudent and
she dident come at all, and a working his ears
like the oars in a skf in high waves.
Thinking NARY ANN in danger, 1 left the steers
obey were not exactly steers either,) and put for
the horse, warranted to stand much stOmping
got there, the driver (durn him) fifty
yards further from me than when | left |
the steers, (they are not exactly steers either J
neither am I-slow afoOt for got saving holt on
his bits, but ddent hold long, and that's whats the
matter with me now. We danced along the road
until we got into the aidge of the town, moustrOus
tight fit it would appear to be to dlsinterested
bystander to jedge whether 1 was taking the
aIo bvy ME hood ba q fayin
along by my arms. must confess sweat some
under the arms and in about the parts you immedi.
ately use when you sit on the fence, but wish
may die if up to this time had cursed a word not
one.
Just then, when it was mp and tuck six and six,
and the horses deal, heard sound, and eI-
perienced a new vexation, and realized a perfect
defeat-ke-h-a-w, ke-h-a-w, ke-h-aw, Ah-he, ah-he,
ahhe, heck seek, week, week, ah-ah-ah. 1t aston
ished me- and was the untimely cause of the death
of tLat horse, with the suggestive ears and the bald
tail, warranted to stand much stOmping, and
great deal cheering 1 am convinced however,
now that he had never saw, smelt, or heard
a jackass before, else why make such
a id tool of himself, and he too warranted to
stand much noise and great deal of cheering, but
all this comes of living on Cane Creek. Mary Ann
with much presence of mind jumped over the tail
board of the Buggy and left fxin hanging to the
horns thereof that looked very much like a fish
net, but it afterwards proved to be full set of
81 % hoops made of steel willOw-tape bamboo
strings and ct cetera. Just as she got right
end up (she is monstrous acuve) she hollered out
like man. Hold on dad, that noise is nothing bnt
the speaking durn that boss kick him in the flank"
But it was no use talking, the locomotive suggested
the git away idea to him and the Ike ha-w- confirm
ed it in the shape Of big and vigorous runaway,
and he consumated it magnifcently: he went l held
on until l met slight hindrance in big stump
which was too high to straddle; tried it, but
five foot high stump in contest with a crotch two
and half feet from the ground amt equal show
MARY ANN could have went over perhaps, but
l .dident and right there my partnership Dissolved
forever with that horse warranted to stand much.
stomping and great deal of cheering. Now, to
up this disastrous creduty of NINE, trusting to
advertised speaking and my faith in the name of '