The Van Buren press., 1861-09-04

# our Zouave drummers had any very gene
'al reputation fo- truth. / told him that
not one of them had ever been known to
lell lie. Where did / suppose Davis
could have mustered up 675.OOO men II
answered that over two million men in the
had offered their services to
President Davis. who wouldn t receive theE,
because they offered to pay their own ex-
penses. and only charge the government 10
cents apiece for all the Federslists they kill
ed. Gen. Scott drank some sherry, and
proceeded to take the oath again. when the
arrived with the following des-
patch:
STONE BsIpoE. P.x.
GEN Scorr Senator Wilson is fixing |
Up big dinner 1t Csntreville. to which !
am invited with my staff officers. Ha has |
some twenty -four baskets of champsEne on |
hand to wash dowr the savory visnds.
Shall send you " hasty plate OF soup ?"
Expecting to take breakfast and dinner in
Richmond, tomorrow, have had bills of
fare tor the meals printed. The dishes are
exclusively French. and will be the best to
be found in this rebel State.
Mcdowell.
Gen. Scott shed tears when he came to
that part of the dispatch which spoke OF
the dinner. But hs stifed the sobs, took
the oath again and received the following
SroxE BRIDof. 3Px.
To GEN. Scorr That Zouave drummer
has played US mean trick. The scoundrcl
had originally deserted from our side. The
Confederates wouldn't have him, because
he was filthy. AS he had the seven year
itch, they gave him eighty-fve cents to
come on our side again. and give the dis
ease to our men. After mixing with my
men. and giving the itch to two whole reg
iments from Connecticut, he managed to
pass our lines. and escaped. As conse-
qnence Of this, the regiments above named
have taken to the woods at full speed. and
are scratching and rubbing themselves
against the bushes as they run. Nor 10 this
all. The itch has spread throughout my
entire force. and the army is becoming de-
moralized Sd much so that l should not
be surprised i: my entire force should be
taking to the woods before night. regret
also to inform you that the rebels got hun.
CRY and captured Senator Wilson's dinner
lust as he was abont to send for me to hell
him eat it. Mcdowell.
"Orderly bring me another tub of ICE
water. immediately - thundered the old
General. as he threw down the dispatch
' Bring me my oath. too" he added. ana
again swore to support the federal govern
ment. Bob Lincoln laughed all over. An
other despatch came in.
JUsr OUTSIDE ALEXANDRIA, P. n.
To Gen. SCorr: The enemy are run
ming but we are before them. My divis
ion is makipg.spiepdM time and long track
: with the prints of their heels towards tn
rebels. The Zouave drummer has raise
the devil with us. have got that inferna
itch myself. McDowsLL.
Words cannot give an idea of Gen
Scott's wrath as lie manifested on this oc
casion. He ordered me from his quarters
and doubtless would have ha | me confinet
ii Bob had not taken me away speedily.
am still in Washington, and although
no one but Bob will talk with me, cal
gather a good deal that's going on. jeff
Davis is expected here every moment. Lin
coin has got loves balloon all ready, witt
that Herring Patent Safe attached to it
The first Confederate bayonet that shows
self in Alexandria, will be the eignal l.
: cut the ropes and old Aoe will swing oi
into space. Mrs. Lincoln has gone to Utal
and Seward hasn't been seen to-day.
am informed that some Confederat
colporteurs got into the ranks of the Fede
raj army and distributed among the soldier
: tracts containing the Parable of the Prodi
gal Son. 1t must be SO, if am allowe
to judge by the number of Yankee soldier
who have suddenly discovered that the
have fathers. and are willing to return t
, their homes. ASA HAREz