The weekly Butte record., 1861-04-06
MeehIgg 8uttt Rstor0
Can't Afford a Daily Paper.
A DIALOGUE OF THE DAY.


The Dayton (Ohio) Empire gets off the fol-
lowing, which is true the world over:
"SPUSGE calls in every evening nearly, and,
after reading the Empire, says be believes he
will take it home to his wife! Yesterday
Sponge called in as usual.
sYou are a Democrat, are you not, Spunge?'
we asked.
Certainly" he replied, rather 'mazed at
the question, and seeming to be puzzled how
to take it; Why do you ask"
Because, we like to know who are our
friends these troublesome times. Of course
you do all you are able for the spread of Dem
ocratic principles ?"
"Of course" he replied.
ado you Ieave any pau for the Empire,
Spmge ?" we demanded of him suddenly.
W-h-y-nor
Why don't you?"
The fact is am too poor. :"
And the fellow moved uneasily toward the
door,
How many cigars do you smoke per day.
Spunge?'' we asked.
Let's see; about five or six; not more
than half dozen"
What do you pay for them ~
Five cents apiece"
=" Then they cost you 80 cents per day ?'
Yes; I'spose."
Making 50 10 per week IS 40 per month
and Sl08 so per year,
All ! so much ?"
Every cent of it, Now, do you chew to-
bacco ?" we asked.
g Yes, a lHtle" he said, rather slyly.
How many plugs per week ?"
Not quite one a day; about five week"
And they cost 20 cents per week, so cents
per month, and 50 60 per year."
q" 1t does look little heavy, all this tobocco
business, when it's put in pile"
You will excuse me if l seem impertinent
but you drink ale, and other liquors, don't you
Spunge?"
Nothing to speak of" he replied"
Can't you give the average number of
drinks per day %
Don't know : sometimes more and some
times less les ee-not more than dozen at
most"
A man in enumerating his disreputable acts
will put them at the loacest figures
We don't of course know urhat you drink,
but each drink costs cents ?"
Yes, l s'pose."
That would be 60 cents per day and even
ing 81 40 per week; 16 so per month, and
$20l go per yearl''
That can hardly be credble!'
But it's true. You have three habits that
are not only expensive, but very injurious to
you, and together they cost you not less than
fve hundred and tlcenty dollars per gear"
Spunge looked blue, but didn't reply. We
continued
'And you talk about not being able to take
a paper that costs you but So per year, while
you spend nearly all your money for worse than
nothing-enough cash to pay for hundred
daily papers Why, if you but stop two out
of your dozen drinks for one day only, you
could pay for the Empire for a week,-to say
nothing about tobacco And you would feel
the better for it, and your family would have
paper, and the printer wouldn't be swnded
to the amount of dime per week. Besides,
Spunge. you wouldn't be going to the-dogs,
as you are now-!"
BY the time we had flushed the last SEN
tence, our auditor was making tracks out of
the passage way and we heard him mutter
something about, tending to his own busi-
ness !" &c, course of conduct we were pur-
suing at that very moment
There are an alarming number of Spunges
in society, and between whisky and tobacco,
they are going to the devil by pieeemeal.
IMMENSE quantities of Swiss watches are