Litchfield enquirer., 1861-10-24
SHORT SERMONS.
BY A L4AYMAN. No. ONE.
TExr.-"I If the Coat Fits, Put it On."

shall turn your present dreadful darkness into marvellous light, which shall chase away the mists of your misery, explode the balloons of your bombasity, pluck the flower of concet out of you, and set every one of you-each an individual tub-upon each individual bottom, it is well perhaps that should tell you in the out set what I propose to do in this series of short sermons. and then set shortly about doing it.
 In the first place. brethren and sisters, pro- pose saying just what l please, just how l please, and just as it pleases me-to be serious or sober, as I feel disposed and the spirit moves to be severe or soothing, as the state of the weather and my digestion directs, to be comic CT cynical, merry or mad, just as ;t behoves. This is the advantage of the independent posi- ton under which I accepted your loud call of few dollars and odd cents, and I know in the be- ginning, and trust to the end, this independent way of talking straight out to you on matters and things, will be beneficial to your temporal, if not your spiritual good.
 | In latitude intend to be latitudinarian, to talk about all sorts of subjects and all sorts of people in all sorts of places-to talk about you, my misguided, unregenerate rreformed, spotted hearers-point out your sore spots to you, and apply the caustic-expose your inherent weak nesses and clap on the plaster-prick your pride scrape off the thin varnish of your hypocrisies- your vanities-your affectations, and your little darling sins and in the most graceless manner possible, try to blow into you little of the true spirit of the TRUE MAN AND WOMAN. And do not be afraid that shall forget your virtues, or sufficiently to exalt all your exceencies; for shall not, and they shall shine the more conspic- uousy in comparison of your dark demerits. 1 And so, my brethren, if you have any old sores you have long covered up and concealed from others, even perhaps from yourself if you have corns to tread upon, or bunions to hurt if you are thieves, CT gossips, or scandalmongers, or back-biters, or meddlers-in other peoples ness, or tale-bearers or towards, or liars, or purse-proud, or gluttons, or brutes, or egotsts, or hypocrites or misers, or rowdies, or loafers, or devils-in-thefesh may the Lord have mercy on you, for your Preacher won't And one thing more-the text teaches the lesson of the whole, '' TtAe coat .fts, put it on," Don't attempt to shirk it don't look all over tho synagogue try ing to see if that brother winks, or this sister winces hese sermons are .tor yo~ and you'' benefit only. If home truth strikes you: it is meant for you-and take it in and put it on in all humility and graciousness, and try to profit by it to mend your ways. The publicity that these articles will obtain, will be the surest method of detecting you, if you endeavor to shirk the lesson. Remember 1 am expounding to large diocese, a larger than any other one preachers hereabouts-and one in which every body is tolerably well acquainted with every body else-his faults and follies-his peccadil- loes and sins of larger growth, however bliss fully ignorant he may ibe of his own. It is of every body that I mean to talk, and shall en- deavor to draw my illustrations so closely that no one who knous himself, shall fail to see himself as others see him. Finally, it is the world, and most interested in you, should ad- wise you to conceal as much of your futterings as you cap, lest you become an object of ridicule and scorn to your friends and the public, which you as we'll as I, know, won't help the matter or mend the wound.
 And now, my brethren, having duly forewarn- ed and fore-armed you all, as it was my duty and pleasure to do, let me conclude with admonish- ing you faithfully to rumnate over these few in- troductory remarks of your preacher, to fre' quently frequent his dispensary of the truth in the future, and never by any manner of means forget to bring the necessary three cents in your clothes, for which Brother Bosom will new pass around his hilarious hat, and be careful not to take any of those counterfeit bits that are float ing around in this plethoric community.
 Which is all at present.