The Nevada journal., 1861-10-11

OF the long hareQ ielIers toiu nef sne was
a ethereal creetur & wood max q sweet me-
jun, whareupon she atact him with mop
handle and drove him out of the house. l
will hear obsarve that Mrs. Ward is a inval-
cradle womun-the partner of my goys
the sharer of my sorrers. In my absurce
she watchs my interests & things with
Eagle Eye and when return che welcums
me in an affectionate stile. Trooly it is
with US as it was with Mr.. & Mrs. Ingomer
in the Play, to whit
soles with but single thavt
harts which beet as /.
Ny naberS injoosed me to attend Sner-
retooul Sircle at Squire Smiths When l
arrove found tie east room chock fall in
clooding all the old maids in the village Il
the long hared fellers a4sed. When l went
in I was saloot.d with hear Gums tie be-
nited man -" hear Gums the hory heded
unbeleever -" hear Gums the skoffer A.
truth" etsettery, etsettery.
Sez l. my frens, it's troc I'm hear, &
now bring on your Sperrets."
of the long hared fellows riz mp t sed
he ould state a few remarks. He sed man
was a cri.ter of iutelleck & was moyin on
to Cole. Sum men had bigger intelle,Fs
than other men had and they wood git to
the Cole the soonerest. Sum men was
beasts wood never git into the Cole at
all lie sed the Earth was material but
man was immaterial, and hens man was
different from tie Firth. The Firth, c0ntin-
nered the speaker, rosolFes round on its
own axeltree onct in q hours, but as man
ha.nt got no axeltree he can't re; olive. He
sed the ethereal essence of the koordinate
branchis of superhuman natur becum mat
tymorfussed as man progrest in marmoniai
coexistunce & eyentooally anty humanlzed
themselves & turned into reglar sperretueI-
lers. TThis was velsifferusly applauded by
the cumpany and as l make it pint to git
along as pleasantly as possible, Isung out,
"bully for yu, old boy.'1
The company then drew round the table
and the Sircle kommenst to go it. Thay
axed me if thare was anybody in the Sper-
ret land which I wood like to convarse with.
sed if Bill Tompkins, who was onct my
partner in the show biznis, was sober, l
shood like to conyarse with him few pc
riods.
ais the Sperret of William Tompkins
present?" sed l of the long hared chaps,
and there was three knox on the table.
sez l. +" William, how goze it, old Sweet
nessP"
"Pretty ruff, old hoss,' he replide.
That was pleasant way we had of ad-
dressin each other when he was in the
flesh.
Air you in the SHOW biznis, William ?"
sez l.
lie sed he was He sed he & John Bunyan
was travelin with side show in connection
with Shekspeer, Jonson & Co.'s Circus. He
sed old Bun (meaning Mr.. Bunyar, J stird up
the animals Il ground the organ while he
tendid door. 0ccashunally Mr.. Runyan sung
u COulC sung. nC CAlCuS nsto NOAi iAAtN-ii
well. Bill Shakspeer had made l crate hit
with Old Bob Ridley, end Ben Jonson wa'
delitin the peple with his trooly CRATE ak of
hossmanship without saddul or bridal
Thay was rehearsiu Dixey's Land & expect
ed it would knock the pep.e.
Sez I, " William, my luyly frend, can yoH
pay me that l3 dollars you we me ?" He
sed no with one of the most tremenjis knox
ever experienced.
The Srcle sed he had gone. Air you
gone, William ?" axed.
4" Rayther," he replied, and | knobd it
was 20 use to purS 90 the subject furder.
then called fur my farther.
elbows things, daddy ?"
"Middlin, my son, middlin."
"Ain't you prowd of your orfurn boy ~
"scarcely.'
why not, ny parient ?"
"Becawz you hav gone to writin for the
newspapers, my son. Bimeby you'll lose all
your character for trooth and verrasserty.
When helpt you into the show biznis
told you to dignerfy that there perfeshun-
Litteratoor is low"
He also statid that he was doin middin
well at the planut biznis liked 1t putty
well. tho the cllmit was rather warm.
When the Sircle stopt thay axed me what
Ithawt oft.
Sez l, my trends I've been into theshow
biznis now goin on % years. There's ar
titil in the Constitooshun of the United
States which sez in effeck that everybody
ma think just as he darn pleazes, them
is NV sentiments to hare. You dowtli;
believe this Sperret doctrin while think 1
is little mkt. Just so soon as man be-
cams !, ,regIar out & out Sperret rapper ht
leeyes OFF workin, lets his hare grow all
over his fase l. &commensis spungin his livir
out of other peple. He eats all the dick
summaries he can find L goze round chocf
full of big words, searein the wimmin folks
4 little children Il destroyin the piece o
mind of eyry famerlee he enters. He don
do nobody no good Il is ascuss to society
apirit oEx honest peple's corn beef harrlls
Admitt;r all yu say abowt the doctrln to b
+roo. / must say the reglar professions
Sperret rappers-them as makesa hizuis OIL
;t-air abowt the most ornery set OF cusse
I.eyer encountered in my life. so sayln
rrt on nv surtoot and went home
Respectfully Yures, ARTEMus WARr.