The Burlington weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1860-1876, 1861-06-01
AnfKMus wAnD IN rusK SOUTH.
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n. IL 1E1o1e. o00 AOve0S0H0os 81
81 had narrer scape from the sonny South. i
The swings and arrers Of outrajus,S alluded TO
BY Hamlick, wara't nuthin in conparison to my
trubles. came perky near swearin sum pro-
fame oaths more'n onct, but hope didn't do
it, for I've proa,iss she whose name shall be
nameles Except that her initials is Betsey I'D
that I'll fine the Meetin House at Baldintville,
Jest az soon as I can scrape money enuff togeth-
er 60 can ford to be piuss in good stile, like
nv wel,hy rabers. But If I'm confsticated
agin Tn afraid l shall continner on in my pre-
sent benited state for sum time.
figgerd conspicyusly in many thrillin scenes
in my tower from Montgomry to my humsted, l.
on sevril occashuns though ''tbe crate kom-
ic paper" wouldn't never be inriched no more
with my lubrications. After biddin adoo to JEFF
ferson D. l started for the depot. saw mig.
ger sitting on fence APPLYING on q banjo
My Afrikin Brother, sed /, cotia from Track
oncs red, "you belong to very interesting
| race Your masters is goin to war exclusively on
your account"
"Yes, boss" he replied, "an' wish 'em hon.
orable graves!" and he went on playin the BAN
10, lar6n all over, and opening his mouth wide
| enuf to drive in an old-fashioned wheeled
chaise. sH
The train of cars in which was to trust my
wallerable life was the scalest, rickytiest lot of
j
''What time does this string of second hand
collins leave." inquired of the depot master. =
| He sed direckly. and went in sot down.
hadn't more'n fairly squstted afore dak lookin
man with swinis,er expression onto his coun-
| tenance entered the cars, and lookin very sharp
! at me, he axed what was my principles?
"Secesl!" anserd "rm a Dissoluter. I'm
in favor Of JEFF Davis, Boufegard, Pickens,
Capt. Kidd, Bloobeard, Munro Edards, the devil,
Mrs. Cunningham and all the rest Of 'em.
4 you're in favor of the WARP"
"Certingly. By all means. Pm In favor Of
this war and also of the next war. I've been in
favor of the next war for over sixteen years!"
:Wnr to the knife!" sed the man.
"Blud, Fargo, Budl" sed l. tho them words
isn't origgernsl with me. Them words was rit
4 the author of the "Seven Sisters" who's goin TO
have Spriug oyercoat made out of it.
i We got under way at last an proceeded on
| our jerney at about the rate Of speed which is
ginrally observed by properly conducted funeral
professions. A hansum young cal, with rcd
musketer bar on the back part of her he'd and
sassy little black hat tipt over her forrerd, sot
in the seat with me. She wore little Secesh
Gag pin'd onto her hat, and she was goin tor to
4 see her troo love, whp had jined the Southern
army, all SO bold and gay. So she told me. She
was chilly and offered her my blanket.
Father livinY" ] axed
| eyes SIR"
''Got any Uncless"
"a heap. Uncle Thomas is ded, tho"
i "Peace to Uncle Thomas's ashes, and success
to himl l will be your Uncle Thomas! Lean on
me, my pretty Secesher, and lngerin blissful re-
| pose!" She slept as secoorly as in her own
housen, and didn't disturb the sollum stiffness
| OF the night with AIRY snore.
| At the first station troop of Sojers entered
the cars and inquired if "Old Wax Works" was
| on bored. That was the disrespectiv stie in
which they referred to me. "Beeawz if Old
| Wax Works is on bored" seq man with face
| like donble-brested lobster, "we're goin to hang
Old Wax Works!"
"My ilustrious and patriotic bummers!" sez /,
gittin up and takin orr Shappoo, ''if you al
ude to A. Ward, it's my pleasin dooty To inform
you that he's ded. He saw the error of his ways
at IL minits parst Yesterday, and stabbed his
self with stuffed sledstake, dying in five beau.
| tiful tabloos to slow moosic His larst words
was MY peteshernal career is over l jerk no
| morep"
"And who be your"
"I'm a stoodcnt in Senator Benjamin's law Of
ifs. I'm gon up North to steal sum spoons for
the Suthern Army
| This was satisfactory and the intosscated
went orr At the next station the pretty little
Sccesher awoke and said she must get out there.
| bid her a kind adoo and Civ her some pervi-
sions Accept my bessin and this hunk of
| gingerbread" | sed. She thankt me muchiy
and tript galy away. There's considerable hu-
man mater in man, and I'm afraid shall alters
Civ aid and comfort to the enemy if he Gums to
me in the shape of nice young gal.
1 At the next station didn't get orr SO easy.
was dragged cut of the cars and rolled in the mud
| for several minits for the purpose of 'takin the
conceit out of me- as Secesher kindly stated.
| was let up finally, when q powerful large Sc
cesber came up and embraced me, and to show
that he had no hard !eens agin me- put his nose
into my mouth. Ireturned the compliment by
placing my stummick suddenly agin his right
foot, when he kindly made spittoon Of his
| able-bodied face Aetooated by desire to see
whether the Secesher had been vaxinatcd / then
fastened my teeth onto his left coat-sleeve and
| tore it to the shoulder. We then vilently hunt
| ed our heads together for few minits, danced
around little. and sot down in a mud puddle
We riz to our feet agin Il bv sudden and adroit
movement placed my left eye agin the Sc
| crsher's fist. We then rushed into each others
arms and fell under two-hoss wagon | was
very much exhausted and didn't care about get
tin up agin, but the man said he reckoned I'd
| better, ana conclu ed would. He pulled me
| up, but | hadn't bin on my feet more'n two
seconds afore the ground few up and hit me
in the he'd. The crowd sed it was high old
sport, but couldn't zactly see where the latter
| come in | riz and we embraced agin. We
careerei madly to a steep bank wh'n got the
upper hands of my antaggernist and threw him
into the raven. He fell about forty feet, stri-
king a grind-Stone pretty hard. | understood
he was injured haven't heard from the grind.
stone.
A man in cockt hat cum up and said he felt
as tho apology was doc me. There was a
mistake. The crowd had taken me for snoth-
er man! l told him not to mention it, & axed
him if his wife and little ones was SOS to be
about and got on bored the train, which had
stopped at that station $50 minits for refresh
msnts." got all wantd. 1t was the hartiest
meal ever ct.
Twas rid on a rale the next day, bunch Of
blazin fire crackers bein tied to my coat tsles
It was ine spectycal in a dramatic pint Of
view, but didn't enjoy it. l had other I'D.
vtnters of a startlin kind, but why continncr?
Why lasserate the Public Boosum with these
here things Sufysit to say got across Mason
Dixie's Line safe at last. made tracks for
my humsted, but she with whom TIN harnist
for life failed to recognize, in the emsshiated
bein who stood before her, the gusn youth
of forty six summers who had left her only n |
few months atore. But l wen: into the pantry |
and brought out ceftin black bottle. Raisn |
it to my lips, sed, Here's TO you, old gal ~
did it so natral that she knowd me at once |
These form! Them voice! That na,ral stile of
doin things! IT'S he!" she cried and rushed |
into my arms. 1t was too much for her she
tell into saoon cum very near swounding
myself
No more to-day from yours for the Perpetra.
ton OF the Union, and the briEgin of the Cod
dess OF Liberty out of her present bad fix.
't- ARTEMUs WARD.
The English view of American Affairs.
eE Correspondence Of the Evening post.1
LONDON, May 10, 1861.
THE AMERICAN REBELLION AND THE ENGLISH
The Futon's news, if possible, has created a
more intense excitement and asfnnisl.Inant -iI,l