The Hillsdale standard. [volume] (Hillsdale, Mich.) 1851-1909, 1861-12-10
Humorous Letter from the Army.

Humorous Letter from the Army.
The Boston Post has the following goot
natured, Marx Tspely species of letter fron
one Of its correspondents:
CAMP GUsPowDER,
] ARMY or THE PoToMAo.}
November, 1861.
DEAR MEssRs. EDIToRs Billy Briggs anc
| remain in the army. The other morning.
l was standing by him in our tent. "Hand
me them scabbards, Jimmey," said he
"Scalbardsw ~ said |, looking round. Yes
DO, Is, | mean." Billy arranged himself ia
his scabbards-a dilapidated pair of fashion
able bodts--and stood up in a very erect aud
dignifed manner. ''Those 5oots of mine,
don't think, were any relation to that beef We
had for dinner TO day.'i jimmy said he.--
"No;" said I."If, they We're only rs tough
I as that beef, and vice versa, it would have
been better
81 say; Cradle" be called out, "where are
tyou Cradle was a ncontiaband, genuine
4 darkey, with foot OF extraordinary length
and extra heels TO maleh, giving him a queer
look about those exlremitcs. "What do
I you call him Cradle for, Bill T. 'thats a
queer name" "Vhat would you call him,
Jimmy, II he amt cradle. what's he put on
rockers torF' Cradle appeared with pair
Of perforated stockings. is no use, sail
Billy, locking at them. "Thcm stockings
will do to pnt on a soc throat, but they
won't do for fee. It's humiliation for II
man like IN. to be without stockings, a man
may be hald.healed, and its genteel, but to
he baicfooted is rnuation. The sleeves is
good too" he added, thoughtfu!lv, "but the
feet are gone. There is something about
the heels Of stockings and the elbows of
stoNe-ppes III this world, that Is Nil wrong,
Jimmy"
a supply Of stockings had come that day
and were just being given out; pair OF very
large ones fell to Billy's lot. Billy held
them up before him. Jimmy" said he,
these are pretty bags to give little fellow
like mc. Them stockings was knit for tho
President ofa Young gorilla, certain and he
was abont to baslow them upon Cradle. when
a soldier in the opposite pr dicam mt made
an exchange. "Them stockings made me
think cl the Louisiana volunteer scared 50
the other day." said Billy "liows that T.
said |. He was among our prisoners and
saw big pair Of red leggings with feet,
hsngng up hefNre a tent. He never said n
word ul be saw the leegngs aud then b"
asked me what they were for. "'rhem,
SAID |, "them is Gen. Banks stockings -
lie looked scared "fIe's lig man, is q n.
Banks" said ], "hut then he ort to be the
way he lives" "liow 2" said be. "Why,'
id ], "his regular diet is bricks tuttercd
with mortal" The next day Billy got
present of pair of stockings from lady; a
nice, soft pair with his initials in red silk up
on them. He was very happy. Jimmy
said he, "just look at them" and he smooth
ed them down with his haud-"marked with
my initials, too; 'B' for my Christian and
W. for my hcathen name. How kind -
They came just IN the right time, too; I've
got such n s, re heel; for tits fact, Jimmy,
that if there's anything in lite worse than un
rcquttcd love, rs q sore heel" Orders came
to "ialI i'm Billy was so overjoyed with his
new stockings he didn't keep the line very
well. "Stcaly. lhnre" growled the ser
gcant, keep your place, and don't be trav-
cling a,ound like the Boston Postoffice.
We we've soon put upon double quick
After few minutes Billy gave groan -
''What is il, Bil'yp said |. Its oil up with
rhcm,' said he. didn't know what he
mcars, but his face showed that something
very bad bad happened. When he brok"
ranks Billy hurried to the tent aud when
got there, there he stood, the very picture of
despair, with his shoes off and his heel. shin
inc through his st, ckiugs like two crockery
door knobs. Them new stockings Of YOURS
is breach. loading, lint they Billy? r. said IN
.unteelIng volunteer. Better get your name
on both ends So you can keep them togeth-
er," said another. "Shoddy stockings" said
third. Billy was silent; saw his heart
was breaking, and | sail nothig We held
council on them, and Billy, not feeling
strong hearted enough for the task gave
them to Cradle with the directions to sew
up the small holes. | came into the tent
soon after, and he was drawing potrait, with
piece of charcoal, on board "Thals
good portrait OF Fremont" said "he looks
just like that; that's the way he parts his
hair, in the middle" THAT i.u't portrait
Of Fremont" said Billy, it's map of the u
s.; that line in the middle, YOU thought was
the part in his hair, is the Mississippi River"
"O!" said
saw him again before supper; he came to
me, looking worse than ever, the stockings
in his hands. Jimmy said he, "you
know | gave them to Cradle, and toll him
to sew up the small holes aud what do You
think he's done? He's gone and sewed up
the heads" ITS hard case, Billv," said
lin ch case tears are almost justitiabe.