Indiana State sentinel. (Indianapolis, Ind.) 1861-1865, 1861-09-11
Our pa Contributor I'm the Home
Guards.

The moment the flag was threatened, large
bodies of men we're called upon to rally to its de-
fense. Being n Target -bodied man, 1 rallied, and
enrolled myself with the Home Guards. The drill
is very severe on me this hot weather. although |
am constantly allowed an attendent with fan and
pitcher of ice water.
/ am constantly reminded that one of the
first requirements of a soldiers is to throw out his
chest and draw i'm his stomach: Having been
burnt out several times while occupying rooms in
an attic have had considerable practice in 1roso-
ing out my chest, but by what system of practice
could | ever hope to draw in my stomach
can't ''dress up''-its no use of trying. If my
vest buttons are in line, am far in the rear,
and if | toe the mark fearful bulge indicates
my position. There is room for argument
in regard TO my entments-everybody can see
at glance just Ichere I stGnd) One evening
we had new drill sergeant who was near sighted.
Running his eye along the line, he exclaimed
sharply:
"What is that man doing in the ranks with a
bass drum?"
He pointed at me but I hadn't any drum-it
was the suplus stomach that l could not draw
in.
i am the butt Of numberless Jokes as you may
well suppose. They have got a story in the
Guards that when first heard the command. or
der arms, dropped my musket, and taking out
my note book began drawing an order on the
Governor for what arms needed. They say
/ ordered Winans steam gun, with a pair of
Dahlgren howitzers for side armsl Base fabrica-
tors My ambition never extended beyond a rifled
cannon and they knew il.
Although in respect TO size | belong to the
"heavies," my preference is for the light infantry
service. My knapsack is marked eight nfan-
try"
One evening the spectators seemed convulsed
about something. and my comrades Uttered by
plato0ns whenever my back was turned. 1t
was mystery to me until laid off my KNAPP
sack.
Some wretch had erased the two final letters.
and had been parading all evening labelled,
"LIGHr INFANri'
The above is one of the thousand annoyances
to which am subjected, and nothing but my con-
suming patriotism could ever induce me to sub
init to it. | rallied at the call of my country and
am not to be put out by the rallying of my com
rades.
overheard spectator inquire of the drill ser.
gea.It one day:
NO" he returned, in an awful whisper, "I
drill him By squads''
| could have drilled him if had had a bayo-
net
Specifications have been published in regard to
my uniform, and contractors advertised for. The
making will be let out to the lowest responsible
bidder. in case the Guards are ordered to take
the field, special eommissary will be detailed
to draw nv rations.
That reminds me of a narrowing incident.
On last drill night. old farmer who dropped
in to see US drill took me aside and said he want
ed to sell me yoke of powerful oxen.
My ancient agricuturist," said /, smiling at
his simplicity, 81 have no use for oxen"
perhaps not at present. quoth he, 'but if you
go to war you will want them.''
"For whaty' said L, considerably annoyed.
"Want 'en 10 dra,c your rations"
The Guards paid me delicate compliment at
the last meeting. They elected me the "Child OF
the Regiment" with the rank of the first corpu.
liant. l was about to return thanks in a neat and
appropriate speech. when reporter who was pres
ent assured me that it was no use--he had got the
whole thing in type, speech and all, and l could
read 1t in an evening paper. He said they kept a
'neat and appropriate speech" standing in type
continually. got his views and held my peace
Yours for the Union, including
the Stars, also the Stripes
Far CONTRIBUTOR.
-CLeueland Plaindealcr.