The Constitutional. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1860-1861, 1861-03-16
WIT AND HUMOR.
SPEECH OF GEN. RILEY,
In tie House Of Representatives. IF Ms
souri,, February 8, 1861,

4 iHt itititHCc "a "a Di3 OHitHufiE tHdA-
ter Of the city of Carondelet, to a standing
committee of the House.
Mr. Riley obtained the floor, and ad-
dressed the House:
Mr.. Speaker: Everybody is pitching
into this matter Ike toad frogs into viii
low swamp, on lovely evening in the
balmy month of June, when the mellow
light of the full moon fills with delicious
food the thin, ETHEREAL atmospheric air.
| IApplause.l Sir, want to put in a word
or perhaps word and half.
There seems to DO a disposition to fight.
I say, if there is any fighting to be done,
come on with your cora-cobs and light
ning-bugs ! Applause. In the language
Of the ancient Roman,
Come one, como all, this rock shall fly
From its firm base, in pigs eye. F"
Now, there has been great deal of bonn
bast here to-day. | call it bombast from
alpha" to Omega" Il don't under
stand the meaning of the words thought
Sir, the question to refer, is a great and
magnificent question. 1t is the all-absorb-
ing question--llke a sponge, sir--a large
unmeasurable sponge, of globe shape, i'll a
small tumbler of water-it sucks up every
thing. Sir, stand here with the weapons
| have designated, to defend the rights of
st. Louis county, the rights of any other
county--even the county Of Cedar itself
Laughter and applause. Sir, the debate
has assumed latudnosity. We have
had little black,ack buncombe, little
two-bit buncombe, bombast buncombc,
bung-hole buncO;Hbe, and the devil and
his grandmother knows what other kind
of buncombe, Laughter.
Why, sir, just give some Of 'em little
Southern soap and little Northern water,
and quicker than hound pup can lick
skillet they will make enough buncombe-
lathcr to wash the golden flock that roams
abroadthe azure mpads of heaven. Cheers
and lauShter.l l alludc to the starry fir
| nnancnt.
The Speaker The gentleman is out of
ORDER He must cOaiiHe himself to the
question.
Hr. Riley: just retain your linen if
YOU pleasc I'll stitch. to the text as close
as pitch plaster to pine plank, Or a lean
pig to Il hot Jam rock. Cries @! go on"
You'll do
/ want to say to these carboniferous
gentlemen, these igncous individuals, these
dctona.ing demonstrators, these prriGinOus
volcanoes, come on with your combusti-
b!cs If don't-well, I'll suck the gulf
Of Mexico through quill. Laughter and
applause. Perhaps you think | am di
minutivc tubers and sparse in the mundane
deviation You may discover, gentlemen,
you are laLoring: under as great a luisap
prchension as though YOU had incinerated
your inner yestment. In the language Of
The noble bard,
- was not born in thckct
To b. scared by cricket" [Applause.l
SIR, we have lost our proper position.
Our proper position is to the zenith and
naGil-our heads to the one, our heels to
The other, at right angle with the horizon,
spandtd by that azure arc of the lustrious
armament, bright with the curruscatious of
innmnerable consultations, and proud as a
spocklcd stud horse Oh county court day.
Cheers.
but how haze tie mighty fallen" in
in the language of the poet Silversnith.
We have lost our proper position. We
have assumed sloshnlicttar or diasa-
biological position. And what is the cause {!
Echo answers buncombe," sir "bun-
combc." The people have been fed on
buacombe, while lot Of spawned, ring
boncd, hamstrun9, wind-galIcd, swyn"yed,
splithooled, distcInpered, pollevilled, pot
belli'd politicians have had their noses IN
the public crib until there amt fodder
enough left to make a cruel for a alci;
graoshoprcr. Cheers and laughter.
'5ir, these hungry brats keep Juggling at
the public tit They say, let down
your milk, SUcky, you'll have spit
bag
DO they think they can stuff such bun
combe down our craw No. Sir; you
might as well Try 20 stuff butter IN Il wild
cat with hot avn. Continued IanChtcr.l
T.. |. 4 a.