Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1861-06-27
Artemug Ward in the Southern Confed-
eTaCY.
HIS SHOW IS CoNFIsCATED.

HIS SHOW IS CoNFIsCATED.
You hav perhaps wondered whareaLouts l
was for these many dase gone and past. Per.
chans you spose I'd gone to the Toomb Of the
Cdppylets tho don't kno what those is. LIS
poplar noospaper frase.
Listen to my tail, and be silent that ye may
here. I've been among the Seshers earnin
lny daily peek by my legitimit perIeshun, and
hayu't had no tine 10 weeId my facile quill for
the Crate Komic paper" if ?oa'lI allow me
to k0te from troothful advertisement.
| went among the SesEers with no ftel!Gs of
anaermos,ty. l went in my professional capa
city. | was actooated by one Of the most
LOftiest desires which can swell the human
BoUzum, viz to give tue people their mon
eys worth By shown them Slgashus Beests
aud Wax Statoots which | venture TO say air
ouSurpast Uy any other statoots anywheres. l
will not call that man who SCI ny statoots is
humbugs q liar and boss theef, bat bring him
be4 ne and I'll Uither him with one Of ny
skoruful froEus
But 10 proseed with M tail. In ny travis
threw the Sonny Soa.h hurI heey OF talk
about Seshesuu and Dustin up the Union, but
| DIDN'T think it mounted 10 nothin The pol
lIcaus in all the villages swearn that Old
Aoe (sumlines called the Prayrie flower
shouldn't never be noggecated- Iney also
made fools Of themselves in various ways. but
they was used to that didn't let it worry
me much and the Stars aud Stripes C0UtiI-
nersd tor TO wave over nv little teu.. Moore
over | was q son Of Maity, and q mem
Der Of several other Temprace Societies, aud
nv wife she was daughter CT Malty. and |
sposed these fax wonid secoor me the iniioOnz
aud perfection Of all the fust families. Aass!
| was diSDuted. State arter State sescshed,
and it crowd hotter and hotter for the under
siued Things come 10 q cilmbmackS in q
small town IN Alabamv, where | was perem-
torallv ordered 10 hawl down the Stars q
Stripes. \ deNpytashum Of red faced men
cum up 10 the dyer o: ray tent WHARF, | was
staudu aud takjn mon=y, { the AFTERNOON ex-
htbishun had commenced, and my ltalyun or
gauist vas jerkin his sOnisliriu chimes I'VE
are cum, SIR" said c miIeugtary man in &
cock; hat, upon hi Z and ho.ey mjshun. The
Southern Eagle is scgeamin threwOnt this sun.
~ Iand-proudly and deGnabtly screamin. sir"
Nv hats the matter with him." scs ], don Z
his v.:tIes SGT well on his stumuick =
That eagle. sir, viii coatinuer TO scream
all over this Bite and tremenjus land
" Wall, iet MIN Screar. Ii yoar eagle eau
amuse Li>self by scgeamin, let him went -
Tie me2 annoyed me, for was BiZzy maxim
change.
" We are cum, sir,upon matter OF duty"
You're right, Captin-. Its every mans
dootv to visit 10y show" sed |.
" We air cum
Aud that's the reason YOU are here y sez
I, larfn one Of nv silvery Iarts, thawt if he
wanted TO COAX Id Civ him SUN OF ny spark
ling eppygrams.
- SIR, you're inserient. The plain question
is, will You haul down the Star Spansled Ban
ner, and hist the Southern flag ~
Nary hjst r Those was my reply.
Tour wax works and beesis Is then coUis.
tica;ed, & yoa are arrested as Spy y
Sez |, " Ny fragrant roses Of the Southern
cline and bIoomiu daiFod,s, whats the price
of whi>key in this town, aud how many cubic
feet Of that seductive G0oid can you iUdiyodal-
Iy hold 2
They made no reply TO tha:, but said M
f-gerS was coHhsticared | axed them if THAI
was ginersliy the stila among thieves in that
country. TO which they also made 10 reply but
ssd was arrested as a Spy, aud must 90 TO
Montgomery il iurns. They was by this time
jiusd by large crowd OF other Southern pat
riiS, who commeust holerin " Hang the bald
headed aberii,onist, and Gus: up his immoral
exhibition = | was ceased and tied 10 a stump
and the crowd went ioE my ient-tha: water
proof pavilion, wherein instruction and amo0Se-
ment had been SO lnuChly combined. a: ID cents
per head-and tore it all to pieces. Mean
while dirty faced boys was THROWN stuHs and
empty beer bottles a. ny masSiv brow, and
takin other improper liberties with my person.
Resistance was useless, for variety of rea-
sons. as | readily observed.
The Seseshers coafsticated my statoots by
smashin them to attums. They then went 10
the money box and coafsticated all tue loose
change therein contained They then wentand
bust in my cages lettin all the animalcs loose.
q smull bat healthy tiger among the rest
This tiger has a excentric way of tcarin dogs
10 peaees. and | alters sposed from his giReral
cohdnck that he'd hav no hesi,ashun IN serTin
human beins in the same way il he could git
at them. ExcuSe me II was crooil, but /
IaEfed beystsrrusly when / saw thai tiger