The Plymouth weekly Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1860-1869, 1861-12-12
William Brown Of The Mackerci
Brigade.
WASHINGTON, Nov. |

WASHINGTON, Nov 10.
Having just made luscious breakfast,
my. boy, on some biscuit discovered amid
the ruins of Herculaneum, aud purchased
expressly for the grand army by con-
tracing agent for the government. 1 take
a sip of coffee from the very boot in which
it was warmed, and hasten to pen my dis
patch.
On Wednesday morning. my boy, the
army here was reinforced by very fat
man from Boston, who said he had been
used to Beacon street all the days of his
life. and considered the State House some
what superior to St. Peters at Rome He
was very fat man. my boy eight hands
high. six and half hands thick, and his
head looked like a full moon sinking in the
west at five o'clock in the morning. He
said he joined the army to fight for the
Uaion, and cure the asthma, and Colonel
Worbert Wobinson thoughttully remarked
that he thought he could grease a pretty
long bayonet without feeling uncoMforta-
bic. This fat man. my boy. was leaning
down to clean his boots just outside of
tent, when tie General Of the Mackerel
Brigade happened to come along and 60.
a back view of him.
Thunder ? says the General, stopping
short; who's been sending artillery IN to
camp?'
There's no artillery Mere. my boy
says l.
Well says he. 'then what's that gun
carriage doing here
Iexplaed to him that what lie took fer
a gun carriage was fat patriot blacking
his boots.
1t is with raptures, nay boy. that l
record the promotion of William Brown,
Regiment 5, Mackerel Brigade, to the rank
of Captain, with the privilege of spending
half Of his time in New York and the rest
of it Oh Broadway. William left the Amy
of the Upper Potomac to pass his examina-
tion here, and the Board of Exeminers
report that he reminded them of Napoleon,
and made them feel sorry for the Duke
Of wellington. One of the questions
they asked him was
Suppose your company was suddenly
surrounded by regiment Of the enemy,
and YOU had a precipice in Your rear and
twenty seven hostile batteries in 'front.'
what would you do?'
I'd resign my commission, and write
to my mother that | was coming home to
die in the spng time
Sensible patriot, says the Board. Are
you familiar with the history of General
Scott?'
You can bet Oh it, says William, smi-
ling like sagacious angel: General Scott
was born in Virginia when he was quite
young, and discovered Scotland at an
early age. lie licked the British in 1912,
wrote the Waverly Novels, and his son
Whaha bled with Wallace. Now. old
boss. trot out your commission and let's
liquor.
Pause fair youth, says the Board What
makes you think that General Scott had
son named Whaha? We never heard that
before
Ha says William, agreeably. that's be-
cause you don't know poickry. Why, says
William, if you'll just turn to Burns's
works, you'll learn
SCOTS wha ha' wi Wallace bled,'
and if that ain't good authority where's
your SHAKESPEARE?
The Board was SO pleased with Williams
learning, my boy, that itg gave him his
commission, presented him with two gun
boats and cannon, and recommended
him fol President Of the New York His
torical Society.
1t vas rumored in camp last night, that
the army would 60 into winter quarters,
and | asked Col. Wob:nson if he could mt
lend me few quarters in advance as
felt like going right away. He explained
to me that winter quarters would only be
taken 10 exchange for Treasury Notes, and
| withdrew my proposition for popular
loan.
'zhe White Feather Party.