Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1861-07-19

eN1 " dhtSh W AhHpH - FNNiiNA NAS
volume of sound has yet been found.
re- Why is a lover like dog Be-
cause he bows and be vows.
as Battles painted by artists are in
variably draen battles.
Gg' Advice for the guidance of hens
during the cold weather. Lay still.
Gg- Death is the only master who
takes his servants without character
ar When pride and poverty marry,
their children are want and crime.
re- Where hard work kills ten, idle
ness kills hundred.
RE- TO have tarts for tea let your
yife'see you kissing the waiting maid.
GE- The frmest friends ask the few
est fayors.
EY- Why was Bonaparte's horse like
his master? Because he had a martial
neigh.
EZ- Patrick gave his testimony in the
riot case BE jabers the first man |
saw coming at me was two brick bats"
DIFFERuNoE BETWEEN ARMY CANoNs
t AND CHCkcn CANoNs Merely differ
enco Of bore,
A Coon Result OF THE TINES "A po-
liticiAn is occasionally knocked into a
cooked hat"
re" Why is Briga1er Gen. Schenck
like Mr.. Burlingame Because he was
rejected at Vienna.
L. If you think you are too tall,
marry an extravagant woman, and you
will ind yourself short enough.
re" Her face was SO sunburnt she
need only have buttered it to become
toast"
EaT A woman may speak as many
tongues rs she will but don't let her do
it with too long one of her own.
Fey George d. Prentice's youngest son
is q captain uf Confederate company
uuder Geneia al Pillow.
Ess- You want nothing, do you {?
said Pat; q Bedad, an If it's nothing
You want, you'll find it in the jug where
the whiskey was"
E41- II you and your sweetheart vot,
upon the marriage question, you for it
aud she against it, don't flatter yourse
as to it's being a tic.
Z~ We are sure to be loosers wher
we quarrel with ourselves; il is a civil
war, and in all such contentious triumphs
are defeats.
GE Tom Moore compared love to a
potato, because itshoots from the eyes
Or rather" exclaimed Byron, - be-
cause it becomes less by pairing"
B-e7' A rural cotemporary announcing
strawberry festival, says" delicious
fruit and pretty women !" What an at
tractiye combination.
Eg~ There is many a gentle woman,
whose heart, like the evening primrose,
opens only after sunset, but blooms with
sweet odors through the dark night.
Eel wish that boy belonged to NE !"
said an old Roger.
What would you do with him Z"
" Id point his funeral day after to-
morrow, and Ia see that he was ready"
. Bzs~ The initials of the Speaker Of the
present Federal Congress are G.. A g
GA Crow Gag is good name for
the speaker Of such a congress. and for
the leader of such party.
G4- A pious paper in Vermont says,
" We have the ability to conquer the
South, and we shall do it." That is the
reason the young man gave for whipping
his mother--he meant to. do it to show he
could doit
Eg- Life has been called warfare.
Blessed then is the periodical armistice
of the Sabbath. 1t is only in the pauses
of the fight that we can see how the bat
tie is going.
Re- Some Yankee poet has been try
ing o sing o sony for the South, and has
succeeded better than the average run of
Yankees who undertake to do the same
thing:
Oh for niger, and oh for whip;
Oh for a cocktail, aud Oh for a nip,
Oh for a shot ai old Greeley ana Beecher;
Oh for q crack alta Yankee school teacher;
On Tor captain, and Oh for ship;
Oh Tor cargo Of niggers each trip