Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1861-07-17
fitssioe
Mr.. Browns Mishaps.

The following, which has been taking the
rounds Of the papers, is decidedly too good
TO be lost:
Mr.. Eliphalct Brown was a bachelor Of
thirty.ive, or thereabout one of those men
who seem born to PASS through the world
alone. Save this popularity, there was no.
thing 10 distinguish Mr.. Brown from the
multitude of other Browns who are born,
grow up and die IN this world of ours.
II CHANGED that Brown had occasion to
visit a town Of some fifty miles distant on
matters Of business. 1t was his first to the
place, and be proposed stopping for a day,
in order to give himself an opportunity to
look about.
Walking leisurely along the streets, he
was all nj once accos!ed by a child of five,
who ran up to him, eXclaimiDg:
Father, | want you to buy me some can
dy.'
Father + Was It possible that be, a bach.
chelor, was addressed by that title? He
could not believe i'll
Who were you speaking to, my dear ? he
inquired Of the little girl.
i spoke to you, father said the little one,
surprised.
Really thought Mr.. Eliphalet Brown,
this is embarrassing
lam not your father, my DEAR he said
What Is your nameP
The child laughed heartily, evidently
thinking IL a good joke. What a funny ia
Their } on are she said, but you are going to
buy me some candy y
Yes, yes ! will buy you a pound, if you
won't call me father any more said Mr.. b.
nervously.
The little girl clapped her hands with de-
light. The promise was all she remembered.
Mr.. Brown proceeded to a confectionery
store, and, and actually bought q pound o.
candy, which he placed in the hands of the
little girl.
In coming out Of the store they encoun.
tered the cbild's mother.
%. mother said the little girl, lust see
how much candy father has bought me-
You shouldn't have bought her so much
at a time, Mr.. Jones' said the lady; Il an
afraid she will make herself sick. But how
did you happen to get home so quick
did not expect you till night
'Jones-I-madam,' said the embarrassed
Mr.. Brown, it's all n mistake; | amt Jone,
at all Itisn't my name. l am Eliphale
Brown, Of W, and this is the first tim
ever came to this city,
Good heavens Mr.. Jones, what has pu
this silly tale into your head? You hav
concluded TO change your name, have you
Perhaps it is your intention to change you
wiseP
Mrs. Jones tone was defiant, and thi
tended to increase Mr.. Browns embarrass
ment.
4 havsn't any wife, madam / never ha
any. On my word as a gentleman, l neve
was married
And do you intend to palm this tale o
upon me 7 said Mrs. Jones with excitemen
If you're not married, I'd like to know WI
lamp
4 have no doubt you are q most respect
BILE lady, said Mr.. Brown and l coDjectur
from what you have said, that your name
Jones; but mine is Brown, madam, and a
ways was
Melinda said her mother, suddenly tai
ing the child by the arm and leading h
up to Mr.. Brown, Melinda who is this &c
tlemang
why, that's father = was the child's in
mediate reply, as she con6dingly placed b
hand on bis.
You hear that, Mr.. Jones, do you Y
hear what that innocent child says, and '
you have the unblushing impudence to i
ny that you are my husbandl The voice
nature, speaking through the child, shou
oyerwhelm you. I'd like to know, if v,
are not her father, Why you are buying ca
Ay " hGN Z a WOulA hhO " nave YOU A
swer that. But l presume you never s,
her before in your life
Il never did. On my honor | never d
/ told her l would give her the candy IL :
wouldn't call me farther any more.'
You did, did you Bribed your o
child not to call you fatherl o, Mr.. Jon
this is Infamous Do you intend to dies
me, sir, and leave me to the cold charities
the worldf and is this your first stepg'
Mrs Jones was SO overcome, that, vii
out any warning, she fell back upon
sidewalk in o fainting fit
Instantly a number of persons ran to
assistance.
Us your wife subject to fainting ia
way 2 asked the first conner of Brown.
don't know. She isn't my wife
don't know anything about her.
why les Mrs. Jones, ain'titp