New Oregon plaindealer. (New Oregon, Iowa) 1859-1866, 1861-05-17

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whether from. a spirit of contradiction.
or, to do her justice, l believe from q
correct and rational view of the subject,
discouraged my project. I was only
the more determined. So caused my
honest old house to be painted bright
l;sresm color, that it might hold up its
head against the scurvy lottery man.
Bless me! quoth Mrs. Smith, what
is the matter with this room? 1t don't
look as it used to do.
why, what under the sun have you
done to this room? cried Mrs. Brown.
Protect me!' exclaimed Mrs. White;
why I seem to have got into a strange
room. What is the matter?,
You've killed the inside of your
house, said Mrs. Sowerby, by paint
ing the outside such a bright color
It was too true; this was my first
CRIME. Would had stopped here!-
but destiny determined otherwise. 1t
happened, unfortunately, that my front
parlor carpet was of a yellow ground.
1t was, to be sure, somewhat faded by
time and use; but it comported very
we'll with the unpretending sobriety of
my house, under the old regime. But
the case was altered now, and the
bright cream color Of the out side kill
ed the dingy yellow carpet within. So
I boughta new carpet, of a fine orange
ground, determined that this should
not be killed. It looked very fine, and
l was satisfied. I had done the busi-
ness effectually.
Bless my soul!' cried Mrs. Smith:
what sweet pretty carpet
Save u.s.! exclaimed Mrs. Brown;
whv, YOU look as fine as two.pence'
.Protect us! cried Mrs. Sowerby;
what a fashionable AFFAIR." Then cast
ing knowing look around the room,
she added, in tone of hesitating can
dor, but don't you think, somehow or
other, it kills the curtains?'
Another murder! thought 1; wretch
that I am, what have ]. done? What is
done cannot be undone; but ! can rem
edy the affair. So I bought a new
suit Of yellow curtains. I'll twig Mrs.
Sowerby now.
Mrs. Sowerby came the next day.
We'll, I declare, now this is charm
ing! I never saw more tasty curtains.
But, my dear Mr.. Sobersides. some.
how or other, don't you think they kill
thy wallsp
Murder again! -Four stone walls
killed at blow! But I'll get the bet
ter Of Mrs. Sowerby yet. So 1 got the
walls collored as bright as the curtains,
and bade her defiance in my heart the
next time she came. ....E
Mrs. 4Sowerby came as usual. Her
whole life was spent in visiting about
everywhere, and putting people out of
conceit with themselves.
She threw up her eyes and hands.
well, I declare, Mr.. Sobersides, you
have done wonders. This is the real
French white which, by the way, my
readers unlesrned should know, is yel-
low. Butt continued this pestilent
woman, don't you think that these bright
colored walls kill the chairs? II.
Worse and worse! Here were twelve
innocent old-arm chairs, with yellow
satin bottoms and backs, murdered in
cold blood, by four un-French-white
stone walls. But there is remedy
for all things but death. I forthwith
procured new set of chairs as yellow
as custard, and snapped my finger in
triumph at Mrs. Sowerby the next time
she came.
But, alas! what are all the towering
hopes of man. Dust, ashes, empti-
ness: nothing. Mrs. Sowerby was not
yet satisfied. She thought the chairs
beautiful.
But, then, my dear friend said
she after a solemn and appalling pause
my dear friend, these bright yellow
satin chairs have killed the picture