The Hillsborough recorder. [volume] (Hillsborough, N.C.) 1820-1879, 1861-04-17
MATRIMONIAL INFELIcITIEs.
CONVERSATION AT THE BREAKFAST TABLl

CONVERSATION AT THE BREAKFAST TABLE.
"My dear" ! said to the lady who was
seated opposite TO me at the breakfast table,
and who has the good fortune to be my. wife.
eff there be one thing dislike more than
another, i is TO receive cup Of coffee that
looks as il 1t had been slipped from before it
reached my hands. Have not often asked
you to fill nv cup TO within an eighth OF an
inch Of the rim, and not give it to me half or
three quarters iull y
"You are as particular as ar old bachelor y
the estimable lady replied, and if had
known il before married you, this day would
not have seen ne your wife. There, sir, is
your cup Of coffee. hope il will suit you"
GOOD gracious" exclaimed, as | took
the cup, " now you've mansged to run il over.
You certainly must be aware that il there is
one thing dislike more than another, it is
TO ind Stops 10 ny saucer"
"Well, If you will insist on my filling the
cup, you must expect that sometimes shall
spill il over; besides, your finding fault with
me does no good, but makes me nervous, and
causes my hand 70 trenble, SO that | only
wonder there is any coffee left in the cup.
Bat here is clean saucer, in place Of the one
you have"
Having effected this important change
tasted the contents Of ny cup. II was evil
dent to me that there vas no sugar in ii.
tasted il again to make certain Of the fact.
Then said:
You have neglected 70 put sugar into nv
coffee. Il here be one thing dislike more
than another, IL is coffee unsWeetened.
81 am certain" replied my estimsbe
spouse. that ! did sWeeien II. | don't
think YOU have stirred ii"
But know have" answered.
"NOt with your spoon," said the provoking
woman, for il is perfectly dry; perhaps,
however, you use year fork"
"Pshaw.' was al the answer youchsaf.
ed to Ibis remark.
/" Now, declare" | said, after having
stirred and slipped nv coffee. you have
inside il too sweet. II there be ore thing
dislike more than another. il Is 10 have nv
coffee taste like syrup"
81 Let me put more milk with it, then"
said The obliging woman.
No, | thank yor," I replied, al don't
care to have ny stomach turned into q dairy.
II there De one thing dislike more than an.
other, il e milk. ! gave up milk diet when
cut ny FIRST teeth
alt IS 10 be hoped that you will give up
the habi. Of fsuit.fnding, which you possess
in an eminent degree, when you come 10 cut
your wisdom teeth, though no one can tell
vhen that will be-"
" Thank you." replied "you will prob.
ablY be The FIRST who will know il wien II
occurs.
Aud happy day il will be for me-" she
answered, With provoking ealmness. Few
kBos, though. nov much unhappiness your
constant fault. finding causes ne. Nothing
DO seems 20 give YOU any satisfaction.
There isn't moment elapses. shile YOU are
10 the house. save when you're asleep, but
you are thus occupied. The truth Is, I have
always been too indulgeut with you, and
humor you Nhen ought rot. didn't CON.
menee RICH; 10 Tie Erst place. should have
paid no attention 70 your whims. bat studied
my OwH convenience and comfort, instead 81
seeking 70 Dake everything smooth and pleas.
ant for you Then would have got along
much better. OH, y0l men are great tyrants,
and i woman yields 70 you 10 the least.
you follow Up your advantage, and bend her
will to yours, aud crush her spirit 10 the
earth. oil, By and by. you break her heart"
Ny dear. viii thank you for another
cup u tOaes, /" aid, passing my cup to her
" bot BE- careful not to run il over, nor get il .
TOO sssei, nor pat TOO much milk. What al
intolerable steak tbs -" | added IL i
tough enough 10 haze been cut from one of
the elitis pAsiared upon q thousand hills
more Than thousand years ago. ii there be
one thing dislike more than smother, il i
tough bsef.
Yog ordered Il yourself, from re market.
90 you needn't find fault with me On account
Of L. knew i was tough lie moment I
looked 81 "a
Then why didn't .ou send il baskr'
inquired.
"IIsesuse, as il was your selection, SOP.
posed you wanted tough one besides. ii / 4
bad returned II you would have found fault
WITH me Tor doing So
Well. can't eat IL, that's certain" I I
said go i had better be taken of Of The /
table. ] shan't throw any more money away
on beei.steats."
"Oh. i viii answer fOf.hssh," said my
economical wife, "and you can have il Coz
dinner"