The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1861-09-09
PUNCH ON THE AMERICAN REBELLION
THE CIVIL. WAR In AMERICA.
CHAnLrsros. July 2s 1876


reputation. great influence, ought 10 nav, IN, -,
other papers, special correspondents AZ seq. o'
war I am the man. In short, Wal en.leS
pondent by nature. II you accept ihs one,
ss~tiI ,eicrranh NV letters to 81. Johns, N. Is
whence they will be forwarded 10 you w.
ateamer-thus you will obtain deNiiis ahaa . VI
all rivals. OF course in senalns aan,.n =.
tions over the wires, I must be as concise az
rs,ssible. To save time and expense, which may
produce a certain twitchiness OF sssie, 70 thls,
however you may not onlee'' A'eo''lN"' '"s
letter epecimen OF my style -
AN row IN Charleston, very centre OF seccs-
sionism' was told in the North should be
able 20 get neither lodging nor food in tbs CT.
~ How ahsursiy things are eSagf"raHo ut
dfs,anee Found little no difficulty IN &c.
curing fair portion of billiard table on which 4
sleep quite com fortabiy; n little announcement
in the morning, to oe sure, when ,n's 49, -
play n my end before seven O'clock s'ti III IL
Amos; impossible 10 prevent baiis hylhe apout
occasionally. Gentleman, inns morning h'uo
winning hazard Of back OF my head. bili they
would not let II count. which / was sorry FOR
on the whole. stroke nnintcnuonai KNOW, out
billiard balls hard, and human nature weak,
particular about lower part back OF heaa. AS
Tor food live on clover, or something confonhu-
edly like II. Call ii sumbo, nave II 1liTee
times a day Yesterday dincd Oh spiit chickeh,
looked like arms OF Austria bro!led for
breakfast they serve us species OF Nulc3ni2cd
Daucake known think {mind only think. SO II
mistaken do not set me down rs another MT
Arrowroot, of Times correspondence lotofieIyl,
known l think, rs corn Dodgers, or na -Jack =
One elastic substance served up with treacle,
SO az 10 resemble blister, Is L know called
ouckwheat cake.
To-day witnessed one ofinstiuitions Of coun-
Try in its most striking aspect Pubic bar
room free at lunch time. Most drinking sa-
looms of any eniinence, spread lunch table
from eleven to one o'clock, every one who
chooses come in. eats rs much rs he likes and
pays nothing About twelve o'clock dropt IN
so.Gem,'' grea, crowd people there, eating,
drinking, smoking, talking. Large tihle SET
out, boiled beef oyster SOUP SnInbo DRIED i'sh,
cheese, crackers and bread Ientiehahiy
harkeeper mixing drinks III Eighiy aEuStlc
manner pouring liquid from one tnmbier 10
another in parabolic curve over his head
General hum of conversation, in which the
words Secession" southern confederation,
.No how Won can fix il. THAT long. slab
sided, Niger stealing son Ola gun, Abe Lin
coln,' NO sir-ree, hoss,' most frequently
heard. Shutting OF fetH. climbing of ice III
huge pitchers, etc. Works OF art acorn walls
female figure in high style of undress most
patronized. Spittoons rs large As bushel b3a-
kets generously distributed over marble ioorS:
easy chairs in all direc tlonsA-Senflenca sitfinS
on shoulder blades.
Charleston picturesque old city--9uite classic
sround--has a ruin someWhcre-powd der mlil
blown up several years ago. People of Charles
ton talk about their antiqn tl1S-0ue house
eighty wears old. Several tine hotels, two or
three excellent churches. and very nice ;irSe
nal. NoluIniuous market place, well supplied
with okra. squash, pumpkins, peanuts pop
corn, yams, squirrels, robins, clans &c. Nut
ton and beef not Very abundant, South Caro-
lima having seeded from butchers meat
City Hall neat little ediiicc. Post Office
somewhere in church. There Is Il good deal OF
sea, and bay. and water OF one kind and
other round about, with several forts in il and
on II. Good esi'!t-!ade, called White Point
Gardan--walks macadamized with peppermint
logenges, or sea shells, don { know which, any
way beautiful effect.
State of society, generally, very much disoT
ganized. Bodies armed men patrol streets all
teeth; very often have not in this country, III
which case, armed 10 upper lip or organ Of
Observation-Disclosures Have been arrested five
Zines, brought before vigilance committee,
suspicious character, who was II where did
come from 7 &c, &c. Stated was personal
friend of Mr. Punch, special correspondent.
All right, let Oft Immediately. Mr.. Punch
greatly respected here. next to General Wash
inGton.
Attended grand caucus last night--great do
monsrration. Principal speaker burst all but
tons of shirt front, said II Northern states
would only contract TO carry the mails as
usual, and supply them with ice, poultry, hay
and fire arms, South Carolina would never sur
render, rather perish Patriots grave better
far than something elsc-patTiot's everything
better than everything else, nothing like pa
triots, in fact every man not patriot ought TO
have his head punched (or words 10 that effect
Agreeably surprised 1T dignity and decorum
with which meeting was conduc tcd--only one
Tight. and that attended with no fatal results
wounded man walked down street next day,
expected TO recover. s5outherners certainly
very gentlelnanly men, should feel more at
ease in their society If they didn't carry quite
90 many bowlc-knives about, dom see how
they manage it. l only wear two, one up my
back, other down leg Of pants, aud small re
volyer in breast pocket, still lind IL incunye-
nient in sitting down-teel as if had received,
ticket to Orthopedic institution, and been very
thoroughly treated
However, l hope to avoid any unpleasant
feeling by carefully conforming to customs OF
country-am conforming continually--consc-
quenee is, am becoming very popular-great
number OF distinguished persons already call
me Jim--driak with every one; this morning
took Two ''stoue walls and general Jack
SON. before breakfast After breakfast met
Judge kinG-invited ne 10 ''sinile, and we
smiled; presently joined by Deacon Mason,
smiled again; On this land YOU smile and
smile, and not be = yiiiain.) result was, drank
three brandy cocktails TWO " gin sings
one buttered rum and moral suasion y
by lunch time; Obliged to DO il in order to
maintain social position. Find aln getting
very popular-met Governor Pickens to day
offered me post OF Judge OF supreme Court,
when things got haed up a BIT, informed
him knew nothing OF law; replied it was OF
mo consequence-had l common sense? 20 l
thought had. He considered that quite suff-
cient; was "just the man they wanted
Negroes less prevalent than l anticipa ted
not very industrious class OF people-seem TO
occupy themselves chiefly sitting on barrels,
corroding large ears of boiled corn, exhibiting
rows of teeth that look like keys OF piano.
and-by, I suspecp. "Niggers amt worth half
what they was'-general sentiment. Head
waiter at hotel weeping bitterly at breakfast,
inquired cause; told me had suffered severe pc
cuniary loss: three months ago was worth fif-
teen hundred dollars, now would not sell for
more than seven hundred. Free niggers go
about streets trying to sell themselves, in order
10 realize before civil war breaks ont. Mi
opinion is, there Will be no secession for long
North will cut of supply of ice, Southerners
will have none 10 make mint )uleps; who'll.
T. - A
cave in. and there viii be an end of this estra-
pade. Once more eagle will soar above pros
trate body OF defeated anarchy; lion Will lie
down with lamb; everything Ok
Talking OF customs OF country, | wish YOU
would publish accompanying portrait OF Col
Bronze, gentlemanly proprietor OF Pavilion
Hotel. Also, portraits OF Jim Snookenback
Rentlemanly ba rkee per, and Mr.. Kelly. gentle
manly porter OF hotel. These little attentions
quite usual 1 assure Soii-eustoIn of country
Hope you will not allow yourself 10 be inl',s
snced By any absurd, preconceived prcjudiccs
against putting; if So ii VIII seriously eInbar
rass private arrangements of
Yours,
GokrLLA
I'VE have received 1876 applications from gen.
tiemen residing in America, each applicant Offering
10 become our war correspondents We will
about il but at the same time it is doubtful whe
Their We shall want any correspondent until
there Is a war.-ED. PUNCH.
THE RUS IRON NxsAssA JUNCTION.
Yankee Doodle went to war
On his little pony
What did he so fighting FOR
Everlasting goney.
Yankee Doodle was a chap
Who Dragged aud swore iarnation
He stuck a feather in his cap
And called 1t Federation.
Yankee Doodle, &c
Yankee Doodle he went forth
To conquer the seceders
Ali tho journals vi fhc North
In most fcrocous leaders
Breathing slaughter fire aud smoke
Especially the latter,