Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1861-09-11

lOIS ifcl.
One week how slowly the moments 90
when We have nothing to hope for, Moth
ing to live for. stand as It were, and
look into future that stretches like an arid
desert before me no flowers, no trees, no
streams desolation is written on the bare
white sands Of all my future life. Yet
cannot blame fate; men deserve to feel the
punishment of their wrong deeds even in
this life. bow my head and submit p
Away with this trying to talk ones selfin-
to submission; there is nothing but prayer
that brings true submission, and | have not
prayed no, rebel, | resist, | despair, [
csrse-I curse myself aBd my own weak
folly. | dash myself against the rock of
an impotent despair.
have seen Blanche Peele, and [ have
heard from her lips my destiny She sat
pale, but composed, in the large arm chair
She grew paer as [ entered her eyes as
sumed the look of a frightened deer, but
she sat quiet and calm. | sank beside her,
and laid my head on her knees; but one
word escaped me, " Forgiveness" She
took her hands and placed them softly on
my head as if in gentle beneGiction.
What you ask is yours; rise, dear Gray,
freely forgive YOU
[ rose. Then, dearest Blanche, we can
be happy once more ? and | took her
hands and kissed them passionately.
Yes she whispered, 'but apart
'Apartr the blood seemed to freeze at
my heart. She smiled smile full Of re-
signation and love; she looked like holy
saint about to resign its dearest treasure,
yet able to say, Thy will be done.'
Yes, we must be happy apart she re-
peated.
l shivered No, no Blanche, you are
cruel, you are cruel | cried out in my
woe; for one little crime to punish me
thus severely and again kissed her soft
hands with a passion of grief She with
drew her hands. Gray: she said, calmly,
there is nothing save heaven itself that can
turn me from my purpose; this solemn
deed sanctified by prayer and sealed by
tears. ltis IN no resentment that | sever the
chain that binds US | unelasp it with the
trembling fingers of love-
No, no, dearest Blanch,' cried, dc
not, do not
But yes she said solemnly, must
the past with its modification, its griefs
rises up and strengthens whatever is weak
in my resolution.
i'll shed such bitter tears over father
shame, my husbands degradation woul(
fell me to earth. cannot be clasped t.
the bosom of a drunkard and be called hi
Wife
But am no drunkard,' exclaimed.
! See,' she said, that little cloud in tn
heavens, it is but faint speck, yet it ma
mantle. Do you understand the alusion
The night my father struck my mothe
bleeding to the ground, | swore as | stoo,
by her side that | never would marry
man who drank at all, still less one that
had seen intoxicated.
The day when | was hurled from m
carriage, the last sight | saw before II
senses left me, was the wine flushed face {
the ore | loved-the one | had promise
10 marry. Now go; if in the future yo
are disposed. to blame me, think how m
young days were darkened by my father
crime, think of my tears, think of m
SAD, my WretCned nome.
If you loved me- said, you woul
not be SO stern
If loved you why my heart strihs
are quivering with the blow | myself a
dealing .........
You are SELFISH cried out in my pa
r sionate grief.
: Selfish! I might be willing to suff
T ,p1
: innocent in my destruction She aros
J Go, Gray Granville, the memory of Il
< parting will cling to me forever
t Aud can forget!' said. Blaucl
: Peele, you the stern disposer Of my ia:
are cruel beyond all that woman has ev
been BEFORE
'IfI have less tenderness than me
: womeu,' she said, it is not that [ ha
not as great capabilities for loving, b
4 it is because | have suffered more mlse
| know that women would almost rath
| die than give up the man they love, ev
J. when crime has darkened his brow. La
@ not one of these, would rather tear /
t heart out, aud cast it from me, than ha
Il it love that which it cannot respect
: 'You are resolute, them l said witt
1t last despairing effort.
It In my wrestlings with prayer she +
e piled, an angel came and strengthen
is me, and am strong now, Gray Granvi
r to drink the bitter cup-a cup | dri
|, from principle.
1t Before l left | turned to look at he
); she had thrown herself in the chair, and
l. with her hands tightly clasped over
es face.
70 Once again lam in my silent room
y, The wine cup has parted Blanche an
in forever; here in its love, its hopes, its tea
wild aud parting; then | dash it away f
Id ever.
it The crystal glass lies in broken fra
t. ments at my feet, over the shining hea
,g VOW never again to touch the intoxicat
draught.
10 Dark, desoating demon, that has b
rs ted my life, away with you! away "
nk you forever! | look up, think | see
ee sweet, sad face of Blanche bending o
We me, and whisper beloved, have lost
We forever She PAGES her soft hands on
nd head, the touch thrills through me, an