The Grand Haven news. [volume] (Grand Haven, Mich.) 1858-18??, 1861-04-17
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

"a S'-- = Always look up-@God looks down.
,d- Sorrows areatho shadows of past
Joys. e'a
.a'-- - Fixed stars shine with steady lus-
''".ia W. :; "a b1s .iasa d. l-5 errd rp
3d- To cure poverty--Sit down and
growl about it. .iisp tg- iisas
- It is good rule always to back
your friends and face your enemies. 800,
i - He thatis- too good for good advice,
is too good for his neighbor's company.
- Men in the height of prosperity
should fear change, and be prepared.
- We like a spirit of compromise; but
no man should compromise his friend or
himself. a.. ..oT
"a Two men undertook 10 see which
would run the fastest. One was con.
stable and the other was a thief. % nfeI
- Men of the noblest dispositions
tlink themselves the happiest when 9TH
ers share their happiness with them, ,,a
--lWhy can't Louis Napoleon'slife be
now? Dye give tup? Be-
cause nobody can make ont his policy Z
- A mans reputation often depends
on the place where he falls asleep. If in
a drinking saloon, he is thought a drunk
'''' l irs-l siu.H no ,r-aiiei eiI
total receipts ofcotton in Mem
phis, during the past year, were $4,000
bales, nearly twice the quantity usually
received. a. .at'1a'1 lH1i D7'l OH
= Dawkter," said an. exquisite,
desire you to tell me what to put into
my head to make il right "Only brains,
sir nothing but brains" =, IN fe.,.
,1o---" wonder what makes my eyes SO
weak" said fop to gentleman. "You
need not wonder--thcy are in weak
place." replied the gentleman. .-f''!
II The best capital n young man can
start with in life is industry, with good
sense, courage and the fear Of God
They are far better than cash, credit or
friends.
- Mother" said little square-buiEt
urchin of about six wears of age, "why
don't the teacher make me monitor some
times l can lick every boy in my class
but one.' aE alrg erseH s-l H -rv
= A club boat has Just been built,
which is so nicely poised that the rowcrs
are obliged TO be particular in parting
their hair down the middle to keep their
balance. .'i' '- '''' '.'.' '"
.,- The Clergyman in n certain town,
having published the bans of matrimony
between two persons, was followed by the
clerks reading these words: Mistaken
souls who dream of heaven esd af
% = A mother admonishing her son, told
him not to defer till tomorrow what he
could do to-day The urchin replied,
"then, mother, let's cat the remainder of
the plum-pudding tonight" '
- An, Irishman going to the post-of-
fec, inquired if there were any letters for
him. Your name, sir" said tire clerk.
(" Therclis a good one, now," said the Hi
bernian; why won't you see it on the
back of the letter" - .H .ra
- The Culpepper Observer says:-
"Wantcd at this office, an editor who can
please everybody. Also q foreman who
can so arrange tho paper rs to allow eve
ry mans advertisement 70 head tho col
umn."
TIE CENSUS The grand totalfof the
population of the United States on tho
lst of June last, as, shown by the returns
published Yesterday, was 3l,429s9l,
against 23,l91 $40 in 1850. This shows
an ihcreae of S,23S,ol5, or 35p5a per
cent. .SaU .wU ersru..i- g4E
"a clergyman at IN afternoon ser
vice was asked 10 read notice Of wo-
mans rights lecture which he did in this
wise: '"At halfpast six O'clock, at the
school hohse in the first district hen will
attempt TO cro,o." 'ia q '- -' PRO
any dear fellow said Boat Hiek-
man to q waiter in a holel, al have q re-
spect for flHs Indeed, may say l am
ford of flies !; but | like TO have them
and nly milk in separate glassesl Il They
mix SO much better when You have con-
troI Of both ingredient" I" a .rr
b--laJohn, who was the.wisest man? r.
"Don't know, sir" .1.sm
lll "Yes, you do know tell me."a
rh" well, | guess it was uncle; for father
scz he WIS SO cunning he got everybody
TO trust him. aud wasn't fool eiiongh tc
payenobody" ,eaa'# oaa laa
la-rHCufce, @hiehgloyou tink de mos,
useful oh de planets, dc sun or moon?n
iiiWelly Sambo, Ithink the moon ortel
take de fus rank in dat ap 'tickier.p y
% "Wha, wha, wha, why do you tiiik so
.Cuffeeq'e pH94 aai -eg laga
q1Ha Well / tell Won kazo sbo shincsf h,