Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1861-07-20
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come soap on to a clean white handkerchief.
and applied il to his wifs's hand tenderly and
carefully. He saw the wedding ring shine
over the white skin, and gave ever 80 small q
sigh as he tied knot just above it.
q Poor little hand :" said he, csressipgly, az
he bent his head down towards it.
"Thsnk you; that will do very we'll ~ re-
marked bis wife putting it under the table.
Nothing like soft soap ~ said he, smiling.
"No," answered the lady, with placid dig
nifty.
';How the boat pitches. As you are wounded.
shall / do the honors ," said he.
"You are very gallant" she replied.
Wasn't always?" he asked, as he re-
seated himself
Always" replied the wife; "but not to
me-"
"My dear Maria"-
pardon me; you are forgetting yourself"
"Not at all, ;" returned the husband, stoutly.
al repeat it. Why were you and so un-
happy tOgether?'
The vessel strained and pitched as he spoke,
and orders were given upon deck, and the
wind howIed, and the rain beat down on the
eky-light above them.
There's storm coming on" he remarked,
rather unnecessarily.
lam afraid there is, replied the wife.
"But answer my question"
What question ~
ooh, YOU know" said he, irritably. "I
asked you why We were always 30 unhappy
Fl might as well ask you why you were
always so unkind ~ said Mrs Thirlby.
II recognize you there" said the husband;
remember you always did. 1t used to irri-
tate me-
Everything did used to irritste you,"
interrupted the wife, calm and provoking.
when it was irritating" amended Mr..
Thirlby.
g You found it 50, ," said the lady, with fem
"Of course it was me-" returned the hus-
band; - was the villain-husbands always
are!'
mo; was the termagant-wifes always
are repeated the lady:
"My love, you were always good, and right,
and pious, and yirtuous," said Thirlby, his
love of sarcasm overcoming his better sense.
You were always provOkiDgly proper-all
broken-hearted submission, meekness, mild
ness, and doWncast eyes, as If advertising to
the world Look here, my monster is break
ing my heart; not that complain oh, dear
me am too good for that. He is killing me,
and I am rather glad he is, am 30 angelic and
resigned"
Mrs. Thirlby kait her brows; for q moment
she hesitatsd between quitting the cabin and
replying Temper trignPhed, and she !2. spoke; ?;
said she. 90 You ware all smiles, frankness,
3olIity, and good humOr-to the world sort
Of proclamation of: See what fine, generous,
open hearted fellow am, and yet my wife
my wicked wife-is miserable with me! Oh,
thank heaven, am not your wife now!n
The ship lurehed again, and Mrs. Thirlby's
tea cup fell to the Hoor, but without breaking.
"YOu needn't get into q passion" F" said her
husband, " nor upset the tea things; you're
not at home now, you know"
al did not upset it, " said the lady, angrily.
eyes, you did !"
"No, didn't"
"Yes, you did"
81 did NOT, SIR" repeated the lady, tap
ping the table suthoritatiyely with her un-
damaged hand, and so knocking of the ether
cup, which broke into dozen pieces.
"There," said her husband, picking up the
fragments carefully, and carefully arranging
them sfore her, " perhaps you didn't break
that, eithsr!"
1t would be impossible to describe the extent
to which handsome Mrs. Thirlby was put out
by this accident Her face darkened. and
without losing its beauty looked q thunder
storm-the ox-eyed Juno wrathful with Jupi-
ter.
Thirdly tried to walk the cabin. "Time has
not subdued that awful temper, then ?" said
he.
"Nor the recollection Of your i'll usage" she
replied. Neither ten years nor ten hundred
can do that"
"Ten hundred :" he remarked; you'll be
fse old lady then"
"Ant 50 Will you. reDorIeQ bne WIG, you
are more than forty DOW"
"Well, if am" answered the husband,
spgrily, "you'rs fvs-and-thirty-no chicken
either
One Of the chief reasons that matrimonial
differences are so bitter is, that each party is
30 we'll informed Of the enemy's weak side.
"Why, positively you're bald 10 said Mrs.
Thirlby, who had not before perceived the
shining scalp in the center of Ser husbands
Uranium; yes, quite bald at the top!''
Mr.. fhirlby turned white with passion-he
was . very vain msn-snd walk ed up to her as
If about TO make some verwhelming reply.
Unfortunately, he saw that her hair was as
black, as lustrous, and as rich az ever.
His wife guessed his intention, and said, sg-
gravatiDgly: "Poor old man, was he bald,
then?"
"You know you were always . beauty"
sneered the husband.
Mrs. Thirdly rose from her seat and bowed,
as if she said: al know it;' which irritated
her husband more than ever.
GAS lovely as afflicted" continued he.
"At all events" replied the lady, that
Silence, madam" Numbered the husband
"You have too often repeated that lady's 9
name, and forbid
"You forbid, ind sed 20 cried the wife, "and
pray, who are you that commands me ? Why
should not mention that woman's-I beg par.
don-lady's name? Who is to prevent me I?
Not her lever, 80, she continued, lashing her
self into q rage, when he has ceased TO be
my husband"
SBy Jovsrn said Thirdly, "thisi is as It used
20 be; but, as you say, We are separated" and
he bent mis- head over the table, and droned :
For this and other mercies, Heaven makes
US truly thankful"
Mrs Thirlby tore the handk erch hisf from the
scalded hand, and threw il across the table
the fragments Of soap fell into the sugar basin.
What noble yengeanee :" continued he,
in q nompous tone UWhat greatnessI what
magnanimity Of soul and what q brilliant re-
partee Pom my word, this 10 refre hing )
What a meeting after ten years absence! The
breeze without, the row within. Any one could
swear to us for man and wife y"
Mot your wife now, sir '"
"Eo, not my wife now. As said minute
ago: for this and other mercies"-
The lady rose to her feet. "Do not insult
me- eli" she said. 81 have been at peace for
ten years. Do not raise feelings that-that-
thai
THAT what?" asked the husband.
paor Mrs Thirbly be1an IN feel the affect of