The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1861-06-12

Prepared II Is that
No outcast from Heaven. NJ
WoRp TO THE "HARD Up."-For goodness sake
do not look melancholy. There are better times in
store for you, see ii there not Why man. one
would suppose YOU were condemned to the plory tor
ture, or something like the sot and the pendulum :
Come, now be cheerful; if you pay your debts
immediately, DO the best yfu able. Care killed
cat II you have not fifty cents to uxuriate upon
the delcacies Of the season. appropriate half of the
amount for something more substantial and wholesome
Kiss your wife if you have one; you have not kiss
somebody eses, or get malriedimmediately-for acts
OF desperation frequently result happily and benefci-
ally in their effects. II you have any children ramp
with them; If you have not, romp with your neigh
boris. Look upon the bright side of everythng-put
on cheerful COMMUNICATING your mind in the
right trim, and If you find that your native town will
not support you, why pack up and pitch into Old
A6es mercenarles. At all events, be cheerful.
Seine Suobs talk about Mrs. Gov Pickens and
Mrs. Lieut. Slemmer,7 and Mrs Major Anderson .
much to the disgust doubt Of the ladies whose names
are 50 improperly used There is no meaning in such
use of titles In this country the husbands official IT.
tie does attach to the wife and to talk Of a Mrs
colonel Shocks ridiculous as it would be to talk of
the wife of distinguished author a. if she were an a
thor, or OF the wife Of eminent artist if She had
painted her husbands picture. The wife of governor
PIckens Is Mrs. Pckens, tho wife Of major Anderson
IL Mrs Anderson, and the wife of It. Slemmer is Mrs
Semmer, and they satisfied with these titles WHY
don't some of the sRobs speak of queen Victoria as
Mrs, prince Consort? Baton Rouge Gazette Comet
Western paper publishes the following eve
knew an old man who believed that what was 10 be
would be. He lived in neigborheod infested BY very
savage Indians He always took his gun with him when
going into the woods; but this time lie found that some
of bis family had taken it. As he would not 20 with
out it, his friends tanaIized him by saying that there
danger of the Indians that he woud not die till
his time came, anyhow.
YES, yes said the old fellow; but suppose was
TO meet An INDIAN and his time bad come it wouldn't
do not to have my gunIn
A sea-caPtain who staying at port in Europe
vas presented with ticket to the opera When The
performance over he asked by his friend how
he liked it?
WELL answered the captain, Il know very little
about music, and cannot pretend to be Judge liked
some things pretty well; but rather think that some
Of them didn't know their business. There was one
woman who screeched and tore round thought in an
abemhabe way, and the folks around me thought so
too guess for they made her doit second tilac
SINGULAR GoINcIDENtE-Th regular lesson for this
day. III the episcopal church Sunday last was the
ID chapter Of Joel The 2Oth verse is in these words
curious, il not ominous Of what the baboon and his
dirty cohorts are to expect from the chyalrv of the
south: But will remove fer off from YOU the north.
army, and drive them into a land barren and desc
ate with his face towards the sea and his hinder
part towards the utmost sea; and his stink shall come
up, ana hi I-saVour snail come up, because he hath
done great things" Richmond Despatch
TIE RULE OF THE ANE.-Mr-3oughta gallon of
his name upon card which happened to be the seven
Of clubs, and tied it to the handle Aldermen C
coming along and observing the Jug That's
an awful careless way to leave that liquor"
'Why so5n said Tom.
Because somebody miShtcomo along with the eight
spots and take it,"
SHARP.-"Are you skilIrul mechanieg@
"Yes, SIR
Nv bat can you make?"
"6h, almost anythingin my line Y
Can you make deyil."
eofaiy; just put UP your club foot and will
sall. . 11 lhree seconds. | saw n chaw in nv
9quired less alteration"
ah M lman got out of the cars at a railway station
a hments, and unfortunately the train left be-
t.l' ad finished his repast "HOud ont" cried
ral ran like madman after the cars-''hould
a1 irtherin' onld steame ingine-yeve got a
aa7ma aboord that's lift bebind.'
- -# Old methodist preacher long AFRO removed
raU t scene Of temptation in relating his 'experi-
aaa. " woman's eres was enee SO powerful as to
.raH thirteen miles rough road in winter
sW" her to tell him that She wouldn't marry him Q
flowing il aunt Bctseys description Of her
l.t 4: He is the mcanest man In the world He
slnt# " milk on the top, and then turns it over ana
a.ius bottom"
N le great art and philosophy Of life to make the
1855. he present whether it be good or bad; and to
g2ar ono with resignation and patience, and enjoy
l. with thaRkfuness and moderation
erfunes Of thousand roses soon die but the
pain ed By one of their thorns remain long after: !
a44" remembrance III the midst Of ninth il like that
.aa,n leng the roses.
lairman Of political meeting seeing rowdv
vs. an raising his to throw a Stale egg at him 5
zw,a- 9ut-"Sir your motion is out Of ordern f
poor milk this, observed a wife to her lord !,
hae ing. Yes my dear, it l. like your tea y !,
EEa4 tiltt.'' 1'Too much water IT, -
a at poet says that the mountains stand fixed s
arsmr we know however, that it is no uncommon t,
aa In them to slope" f
VA been said, and truthflly, that We can earn u
manhood only BY serving out faithfully the i
ara5 f boyhood. Z
a. once describeda soup which he had tasted as d
ns- rim water which the shadow Of COW had
nse is more soeiable than false speaking dog =,
Cas-. "- know Is better company than a man whose
lords cannot understand y
.l pleasantest thing in the world are pleasant T.
n q and the greatest art III life to have as many "
=. as rossible. Il
t-nosed gentleman asked wit if he believed in "
Hr Aye sir replied he, looking him fully in the p
sees toe much evidence before me to doubt it," II
g said: II loved my wife first For the first 81
yg 1hs felt a. if Icould eat her up: ever since i
bari been sorry didnHn 4; ~
A zen look to happiness in the future TO every II
lyen aud earth seem TO embrace the distance IT,
N aH IS very unpopular officer with some of the M
lt General Homework ia
e. iendship creep gently t5 height; it II rush to ha
" soon run itself out of breath. Pe
@ trongest kind Of t hint. a lady asking a gen II
to see if her ring will gp bis little finger r.
IS is blaeksmiths apron like uuunery gates / III
.gs; II keeps off the sparks. TOT
passes fora sage if he seeks for wisdom; il he pr
.Hsa re has found it, be is tool.
a EuLosoPHcAL FAcr.-A balloonist states shat be
IL