Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1861-07-20
BURGLA2Yi

1rt hd1--A ~
TIIE storehouse and workshop of stephen J.
L Carpenter at Nekoosa, was feloniously en-
tered on the night of the 3rd inst, and two
kegs containing powder-one to the amount of
some three or four lbs. and the other contain
ing some twenty or twenty-five lbs.-were sto-
, len therefrom. 4 reward of Five Dollars will
be given for the apprehension and conviction
Of the thief by the subscriber.
27-1w 5. J. CARPENTER,
/ Now, it came to pass that there was
created beautiful valley, and fertile,
and plants of luxurious growth, and
huge trees, and beasts that were wild
Of great dimensions and some Of lesser,
and reptiles strcaked and spotted, and
swarlns Of flies Of all conceivable shapes
and forms and dispositions according,
and birds Of the air, and tieas and all
sorts Of creeping things were found
there, and in the midst Of this beauti-
ful valley flowed a beautiful stream of
water Of great dimensions, both wide
and deep, and its length has never been
known; and this river was filed with
all sorts Of fish, from the great sturgeon
down to the little minny.
! And it came to pass that Just little
after land SO near together that the
writer hereof could hardly distinguish
the di1ferenoe) commenced the creation
of the biped race, and among them
was one species called man, and this
class Of beings possessed great souls
and strong minds and iron nerves and
indomitabIe wills, and were endowed
with faculties Of love, devotion, admi-
ration, and the greatest of all is their
patriotism.
Now it came to pass that this class
OF beings discovered this beautiful val
ley and pcopIed it according to the di-
vine JUNCTION, until there was found to be
scores Of souls in it, and they set up
their dominion and reign oyer it; and
on account Of the great political insti-
tntions Of this great valley, it was di-
vided into great political divisions, and
among them WAS one Wood County,
and through the middle Of this great
division flowed this great river.
Now it came to pass that the people
that inhabited this great political diYis-
ion were very APPELLANT and laborious
and cnterprising and cultivated great
fields and built great manufactures and
constructed great cities
And the names Of these great cities
were Grand Rapids and Frenchtown,
with It's appendix, Pine Bluff:
Now, the former of these great cit
les is noted for its virtue, its intelli-
gence, its religion, its public editices,
churches and Summaries; and is where
the great judge comes to sit on the
judgment seat and judges Of the differ
cnces Of all men III this great political
division, and is where they raise great
military companies to fight their coun-
try's battles, and is also the great mart
Of trade, and is where the people get
their wares, eats and drinks and good
whisky.
Now, this latter great city is noted
for its extensive manufactures, their
great fields, and the appendix for it's
enormous trade in 15eod shot achishy.
Now, it came to pass that this great
nation out Of which is formed this great
political division, has instituted the
fourth day of July as national holi-
day, being the anniversary of the birth
day of this great nation. Now, the
first-named great city called together
its wise men, its elders, lawyers, bank
ers, landlords, merchants and military
chieltains, and passed an ordinance and
ordered it to be published in the official
journal of this great city, for the peo-
pie Of this great division to congregate,
and celebrate, and festivate, and inc
briate slightualy, and show forth their
patriotism in an honorable, pleasurable,
social way, and bought their powder
to make their thunder with, and paid
their money for Il; and every time the
little tbunderer speaks, the people have
the consolation Of knowing their pow
der was bought for cash; and they ate,
drank and were merry mot dizzy and
when night came they enjoyed a merry
dance to the music of the S'fddle and
the bow" and retired with hearts brim
full and overlooking with joy and sat