Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1861-03-15
s.,,,nnnisinr Deacon.


Old Deacon HObbouse had q habit of FREE
uuently thinking aloud. Especially If any
mattel troubled him, he had to talk it over
with himself before bis peace of mind
could be restored. One day he was alone in
his barn. pitchiup hay from the scaffold TO
the now, when his neighbor Stevens 9 to
fud HIM. Stevens heard a voice and listened.
1t was the deacon talking to himself. He
was c%ondemning in the strongest terms the
extravaganza of the,ministers vile.
."She sets n worse example than Satan %
exclaimed the deacon, by way of climax.
And having freed his mind, he was pre-
pairing to come down from the loft, when
Stevens Elided out of the barn, and eame in
again Just as the deacon landed on the floor.
GLOW de do, deacon2p cried Stevens. 81
want TO borrow your half,bushel an hour or
90, sarlin, sartiu,o said the deacon. The
measure Yves put into the n%eighbor's hands,
and he departed.
1t was n peaceful communicable minis
ter's wife was an excellent woman, notwith-
standing her love of fnery, and Deacon Hob.
house was of all men the least disposed TO
make trouble in the society. Hence the sem
sation which was produced when the report
circulated that be had used almost blasphem-
Gus language in speaking of that amiable
lady. The sweetest tempered woman would
Lot like to hear of a grave and influential
deacon declaring that "she sets a worse ex-
ample than Satan l' The minister's wife,
whose ear was in due time reached by the
report, felt in a high degree incensed, and
sent her husband to deal with the honest old
man.
The latter was astonished when told ofthe
charge against him.
"a never said so y he solemnly averred.
"You are quite positive that you never
did," said the minister.
Heaven knowsl It's false as false can
beln exclaimed the deacon. "Whatever
thoughts l may have had about your wife's
extravsgance-and l am noW free to say l do
think she has set our wives and daughters
a running after new bonnets and shawls,
and such vanities-whatever thoughts I've
bed, though, I've kept EN- to myself. l
never mentioned 'em TO a living soul, never!'
The good mans earnestness quite con-
WINGED the minister that he had been falsely
reported. 1t was therefore necessary to dig
to the root of the scandal. Mrs. Brown, who
told the minister's wife, had heard Mrs.
Jones say that Mr.. Adams said that Deacon
HObhouse said so; and Mr.. Adams, being
applied 10, stated he had the report from
Stevens, who said that he heard the deacon
say SO. Stevens was accordingly brought
up for examination, and confronted with the
deacon. a
Its an outrageous falsehoodp' said the
deacon. "You know, Stevens l never
opened my lips to you on the subject, nor to
any other man." u,
II heard you say" remarked Stevens
coolly, 'that the minister's wife set a worse
example than Satan and / can take my
oath Of it," ...
"When ? where" demanded the excited
deacon. .r
'Tn your barn." replied Stevens, "when 1
went to borrow your half bushel."
''There never was such a lie Stevens
Stevens" said the Quivering deacon, ''you
know
'"Wait till | explain" interrupted Stevens.
81 was on the barn floor, you was up on the
scaffold pitching hay, and talking to yourself.
! thought it too good to keep; so, Just for the
joke, | told what / heard you say.n
The deacon scratched his head, looked
humbled, and admitted that he might, in
that way, have used the language attributed
to him. To avoid trouble in the society, he
afterward went to apologize to the minister's
wife.
"You must consider" said he, that l was
talking to myself; and when l talk to my
self, / am apt to speak my mind very reely.H