Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1861-12-06
THE DAILY PRESS.
FAOT AND FUN.

tion to Agricultural pursuits by introducing
Hops inNtheir residences this winter. He
doubts if this is Sage undertaking, although
in course of Thyme it may Turn up to their
advantage, in bringing about more thorough
knowledge of Pears, which is very essential
to the art of Husbdndry. He says he knows
ayouDg lady who can't be Beet in the agri
cultural line, for she has already narrowed
the feelings Of half the young men in town,
and drained the family purse, until it posi-
lively refuses to yield any more without con-
tinuous manure Usring. Bob has been sent
to the Ststion-house.)
The average weight of 4, 269 men, weighed
at the Mechanics Fair, in Boston, was lac 10.
l3 OF. The estimated average in Belgium is
l4O.4O ID; in France, 1860 h.; and in Eng
land, 1908 ID.
PROMOTION FROM THE RANKs.-Seveuteen
private soldiers of the French army, in Bona
parties time, by their bravery and talents,
raised themselves to the following dis
tinguished stations: Two became kings two,
princes; nine, dukes; two, field marshals, and
two generals.
II know every rock on the coast" cried
an Irish pilot when a ship bumped, "and
that's one of them"
Gentlemen who smoke allege that it makes
them feel calm and complacent. They tell
no thoO bA0 hOl0 bhOy luulS tHo less Iuey
fret.
"well, John, did you take the note gave
you to Mr.. Smithers p inquired a gentleman
of bis rustic servant "Yes, sir" replied
John; 81 took the note, but don't think be
can read it," "Oan not read it'll" exclaimed
the gentleman; "why so, John ?" Because
he is so blind, sir" While wor 10 the room
he axed me twice where my hat was, and it
wor on my head all the time"
Jealousy is said to be the offspring of love-
Yet, unless the parent makes haste to strangle
the child, the child will not rest till it has
poisoned the parent.
The soup house established in Baltimore,
by Ross Winans, supplies six thousand per-
sons daily. The amount of soup distributed
daily is eight hundred gallons, and of bread
sixteen hundred loaves.
regiment should always present an at
tractive appearance except when before an
enemy-and then the more repulsive it is the
better.
CoNUNDRUM FROM BoB.-Why should Gov
ernment put a check on women's secrets
Because they are all certainly destined for
pirate ears.
ALTERING THE SCORE -Hsrd-up customer
'Let ME see, how much is that little amount
owe your Expectant grocer (blG1dIy)-
49, l5 sir" Hard-up customer-'Ah,
well, give me another bottle of whisky
that will be 50 so, and-have you got a
half? All thank you That will be just
$3-you can make a memorandum of it.
Good. morningP
The average number of letters received for
the soldiers at the Washington post-ofice is
forty-fve thousand per day, and an equal
number are matchmaking an aggregate of
nienty thousand envelopes and sheets of pa
per per day.
MILToN's WATCH.-Sir Charles Fellows
has bequeathed the watch of Milton to the
British Museum in the following terms:
Il give and bequeath Milton's watch to the
Trustees of the British Museum, to be de-
posted in the British Museum, upon con-
dition that the watch may be placed under
glass, or in some other way be always kept
exposed to public view."
In returning thanks, in an after dinner
speech, Brown declared that he was "too full
for utterance."
No man has right to do as he pleases, ex-
cept when he pleases to do right.
Why are good husbands like dough? Wo-
men need them.
Ihe beautiful words of the celebrated song,
'Home, sweet home" were written on a
SurdayI ID an upper room or the falals
Royal at Paris, by John Howard Paine, an
American.
It is said of children who were born with
silver spoons in their mouths, that when
they grow up there is often nothing lett of
them but the spoons.
When you dispute with a fool, he is very
certain to be similarly employed.
Which is the pet among the Planets
Ma(r)s planet.
Mrs. Partington says that there is not
enough Of the spirit of '76 in the South to
fill fluid lamp.
Why do our soldiers need no BARRIERS? Be.
cause they are regularly shaved by the Gov
ernment contractors.
For organizing an army, feeding, clothing
and equipping IT, and going into war bust.
ness in general, the American people stand
loan.