The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1861-05-29
McGREG0R, IOWA, WEDNESDAY, MAY 29, 1861
MISCELLANEOUS.

MISCELLANEOUS.
| mrs. Grundy:
| Most Of Us erring mortals, have reason to
believe ourselves acquainted with this estima.
ble lady, whose name adorns the head Of this
column. The respectable individual@whu
feels such lively interest in our welfate,-
who takes such scrupulous care of our reputa.
tions. Dear old soul !-how could We livs
without her How life would stagnate in some
quiet towns, where there are few excitements
70 keep people awake, and help them kill
dme.
How would It be possible to support life II
the valuauls old lady failed to keep Us inform.
ed Of the current items Of news, from our
neighbors kitchen and back doors What
could We find to interest ourselves and occupy
,ur minds, il Mrs Grundy did not startle "
occasionally with wonderful bits Of news
| What would life be worth to Us, If she did
not know how many times in one week, Mr..
Jones went to see Miss Thompson, or whether
Mr.. Brown went home with Miss Jackson, and
il she took his arm, and what it meant:
How miserably behind the times We should
be il We did not know who had been refused,
who were engaged. and who likely to be, and
who-in Mrs. Grundys elegant wordsworth
'give all their old shoes" to attain that felicit.
Gus state Of being. a. ~ aa ~ l
Vigilant Mrs. Grundy! N"thing ever 60.
capes her eye. Argus VAS nothing to her.
When she is at home she generally sits at
the window, one eye on her work, and the other,
and by far the best, on the street. But she 10
by no means = domestic character. She visits
all the shops. from the merchants to the sa-
looms. Many Of her choicest bits Of news are
cleaned in places that her friends would call
low. "Wine in, and wisdom OUT" is an old
saying, the truth Of which she has proved.
She goes to church. Indeed she does She
would not on any account miss the items she
collects there. Who goes regularly. and who
don't; who has . new hat. and who wears the
! old Que, and who comes in with Al. air, cas-
though they owned the town." She hopes in
deed she has been better brought up than to
neglect attending church. ... 4.
She goes to parties. Goodness what would
happen II she did not know what every ono
wore at these festive gatherings How else
could it be known that Mrs. Grimes wore an
old silk. that had been dyed, or that Mise
Gipin had three founces on her new sill, +,
wlsea the fashion was two, or that Mr.. Hobbs
b I'd atteadcd Miss Nobs to her home and given
her his ssm. a
supposing that tremendous fact had never
been brought to light just suppose such case.
Would not such things 60 ON under our very
noses with impunity. If they could forget Mrs.
Grundy, would not brave men and presuming
maidens, act a little more like themselves in
each others society! Would not they not be.
come better acquainted. and when they come
to choose "for better for worsc." wenld they
not be able to select little more suitably q
Who dases to suggest that this would be better
than the present Ieap-in-the-dark system7 Who
has the boldness to assert that if young men
and maidens were free to act naturally, there
would be fewer miserable marriages, and
therefore fewer fashionable crimes?
Dear Mrs. Grundy, how fearlcssly one can
plume! ..--..-.. ..-s
A lonely widower, whose heart and home are
desolatc, who has shut himself up with his sor.
row till he has become desperate, finally braves
Mrs. Grundy. and goes out once more among
his fellow creatures. Mrs. Grundy il surprised,
or would be, if she had not outlived the posi-.
bility Of such vulgar emotion.
He ventures to speak to an unmarried lady.
"Ah, 80 soon?" "How can he fancy her?"-
$50 different from the angel he lost."-(Witb
. sigb)-"How would poor feel, il she
could see the husband she 80 adored. 80 taken
up with little flirting thing" "Thiak Of his
notherless babies, If he marries such doll
baby" ..-s.
"Wouldn't it be" splendid match if he
would marry good Miss Sharp, who would be
such prudent. notable wife to him. What if
she is forty years old and shrcw9 She is
such thrifty woman" Unfortunately,
widowers never will marry to please their
neighbors.
A wife. whose husband refuses to accompany
her out, who pines and droops for little social
life, who, although favored with his presence,
cannot be perfectly happy while her lord pores
over the newspapers, or with feet elevated,
smokes the fragrant weed. ventures timidly 70
put her aching head out Of doors for breath
Of air. or . sight of other human beings.
Shocking Mrs. Grundy shakes her wise
head. "This il little too much." She
''hopes Mr.. Blank isn't jealous" She "does
believe Mrs. Blank 10 . we'll meaning woman,
but very mpr' dent" Mrs. Blank If she is
sensitive, shrinks back affrighted from the
sharp looks that greet her; the undertone 70.
marks che hears. and shuts herself up in the
house with her "domes,ic" husband, grows
nervous and delicate. and finally lays her weary
head 70 rest on it cold pillow, and Mrs. Grun.
dy calls It "mysterious providence"
Here and there over the wide world, We
have seen occasionally one, who stands not in
ave Of Mrs. Grundy. but their experience Of
life has not been such - to attract others. to
come out in defiance Of this unseen but power.
full personage, who rules her trembling subjects
with rod Of iron. Lu.
BITTERNESS Unparalleled.
Tho most ferocious specimen Of moral
gall we ever encountered, is the following
language used by John Randolph, Of Roam
okc, toward Henry Clay, in secret session