Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1861-09-27
Artemas Ward Sees the Prince
Napoleon,

AsSsASANSAs
Notwithstandn I haint writ much for
the papers of late, nobody needn't hatter
themselves that the undersigned is dcd.-
On the contrary, still live, which
words was spoken by Danyil Webster
who was a able man. Even the old-line
wings of Boston will admit that. Web
stcr is ded now, howscver, and his mantle
has probly fallen into the hands Of sum
dealer of 2nd hand close, who can't sell it.
Lcastways nobody pears to be goin round
wcarin it to any particler extent, now
days. The regiment of whom | was kur-
nal inerly concluded they was better
adapted as Home Guards, which accounts
! for your not hearn of me, ear this, where
the bauls is the thickest and the cannon
doth roar But as American citizen
shall never cease to admire the mastery
advance our troops made on Washington
from Bull Run short time ago. 1t was
well dun. | spoke to my wife bout it at
the time My wife scd it was well dun.
1t havin there4 bin determined to pro-
tect Baldinsvllc at all hazzuds, and as
there was not apprehensions Of any immo-
jit danger, thought | would 90 orf onto
pleasure tower. Accordinly put on
clean Billed Shirt and started for Wash
inton, | went there to see the Prints
Napoleon, and not to see the phase, which
| will here take occasion to obsarve is
about as unintercstin locality as there
is this side of j. Davis's futer home, if
he ever does die, and where | reckon
they'll make it so warm for him he will
81 for his summer close. 1t is easy enutf
to see why man goes to the poor house
or the penitcntiary. It's bccaws we cant
help it. But why he should voluntarily
90 and live in Washinton, is intirely be-
yound my comprehension, and | can't say
no faircr nor that.
[ put up to cadin hotel I saw the
landlord and scd, chow dye do, Squire.
Fifty cents, SIR was his reply,
"Sir -
"Ealf-a-dollar. We charge twenty
five cents for loohia at the landlord and
fifty cents for spcakin to him. If YOU
want supper, a boy will show you to the
diuin room for twenty-five cents. Your
room bcin in the tenth story, it will cost
you a dollar to be shown up there.
"lIow much do you AK a man for breath
ing in this equinomikal tayun? ," sel [.
Ten cents Brcth,' was his reply.
Washinton hotels is very reasonable
in their charges. y. B.-This is Sar-
kassum.
| sent up my keerd to the Prince, and
was immejitly ushercd before him. He
received me kindly and axed me to sit
j down.
Il have cum to pay my rcspccks to you
] Mister Napoleon, hopin to see you hale
aud harty."
Il am quite WE'LL" he sed, Air you
well, sir?'
He seemed to be pleased with my ways
and we entered into conversation at onet.
"Ilow's lewis ?" | axed, aud he said
the Emperor was well Eugcny was
likewise well, he said. Then asked was
Lewis a good proyidcr? did he cum home
arly mites did he perfoom her bed DOM
at a unreasonable hour with gin and tam
zy ? did he 90 to 1.-The lodge" on mites
when there wasn't any Lodge? did he Of
/ ten hay to 90 down town to meet a friend? ?
did he hav extcnsiy acquaintance among
young widlers whose husbans were in
Caitorny? to all of which questions the
Prints pcrlitcly replide, giving me to un-
dcrstan that the emperor was behayin
well.
Il ak these questions, my royal duke,
and most noble hishncss and impcrials,
bccaws I'm anxious to know how he stans
as man. | know he's smart He is
cunnin, he is long hedcd, he is deep-he
is crate Bat onIess he is good he'll cnm
down with crash one of these days, and
the Bonyparts will be Bastid up agin.-
Bet yer life.'
Air you preacher, sir ~ he inquired
slitely sarkastieul.
No, sir, but | blecve in morality. |
! likewise believe in Mectin Houses. Show
me place where there isn't any Mcctin
Houses and where preachers is never
seen, and I'll show you place where old
hats air stuffed into broken windcrs,
where the children air dirty and ragged
where gates hav no hinges, where the
wimin are slipshod, and where maps OF
the DEVILS wild land are painted upon
mems shrt-bosoms with tobacco jooce =
That's what I'll show you. Let US con-
slider what the preachers do for US before
we aboose en-
We talked sum more about matters
and things, and at larst | riz to go. Il
will now say good bye to you, noble sir
and good luck to you. Likewise the
same to Clotldy. Also to the gorgeous
persons which compose your SCOT. Ii the
Emperor's boy don't like liyin at the Tool.
cries, when he gifts older, and would like
to imbark in the show bizniss, let him
cum with me and I'll make man of him.
You find us sumwhat mixed, as | before
obsarved, but cum agin next year, and
you'll find US clearer nor ever. =
Then advisin him to keep away
from the Peter Funks auctions of the
east, and the proprietors of corner lots in
the west, | bid him farewell and went
away.
Yours, muchly,
WARD, (Artemas.
" The most common error of men
anl ,rOp,on ;e tbat Of lo0l- 4o,. b,,,,