Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1861-06-08

hedLN ME GlltN-l1ceQ DOYS were thrO-
ing stuns and empty beer bottles at
my massive brow, & taking other im-
proper liberties with my person. Re
slStancc was useless, for a variety of
reasons, as | readily obsaryed.
The seceshers confiscated my stat
cots by smashin them to atums. They
then went aud bust IL my cages, lettir
all the animiles loose, a small healthy
tiger among the rest. This tiger has
an excentric way Of tearin dogs to pic
ces, and alters sposcd from his giner-
al conduck that he'd have DO hesita-
shun in sarvin human beins in the same
way eff he conld git at cm. Excoose
me if | was crooil, but | larfed boys
terusly when | saw that tiger spring in
among the peple. ''Go it, my sweet
cuss - inardly exclaimed, Il forelv
YOU for bitin off my left thum with all
my heart! Rip EN- up like bully tt
ger whose larc has been invaded by
seceshers -
can't say for certin that the tiger
serlsly injured any of 'em, but as he
was seen few days after sum miles
distant with large and we'll selected
assortment Of seats Of troVsis in his
mouth, and as he looked as tho he'd
bin havin sum vilent exercise, I rather
guess he did. You will therefore per-
ceive thai they didn't confiscate him
much.
was carrid to Montgomery in iurns
and placed in durans vial. The iail
was an ornery edific, but the table was
llbrally supplied with bakin and cab
bidge. This was q good variety, for
when | didn't banker after bakin /
could help myself to the cabbidge.
| had nobody to talk to nor nothing
to talk about, however, and I was very
lonely, specially on the first day; SO
when the jaler parst my lonely sell, ]
put the few stray hairs on the back
part Of my he'd G'm bald now, though
their was a time when ! wore sweet
auburn ringlets) into as dishevild state
as possible, q rollin my eyes like a
manyyuck, l cride: "Stay, ialer, stay!
| am not mad but soon shall be if you
don't bring me suthin TO Taik!' He
brung me sum noosepapcrs, for which
thanked him kindly,
At larst I got an interview with JEFF:
terson Davis, tie President Of the
Southern Conthieveracy. He was
quite perlite and axed me to set down
and state my ease. | did it, when he
larled and sed his gallunt men had ben
q little too enthoosiaSstic in contiscatin
my show.
eyes," sez I, 'Ethey confscated me
too muchly. | had sum hosses confis-
Gated in the same way onct, but the
coniscaters air now pounding stun in
the states prison at Injinnapylis.'
"WaII, wall, Mister Ward, you are
at liberty to depart; you air friendly to
the south know. Even now we hcv
many trens in the north who sympa-
thize with Us, and won't minglc with
this fight.''
j. Davis, theirs your CRATE mistaik.
Many Of us was your sincere friends,
and thought certain parties amung us
was tussin about you and meddlin with
your consarns intirely too much. But
J. Davis, the mint you fire a gun at
the peace Of dry goods called the Star
SpangIed Banner, the north gifts up an
rises en- massy, in defence of that ban
ner, Not agin you as individooals-
not agin the south cyen--but to save
the flag We shood indeed be weak
in the knees, unsound in the hart, milk
white in the liver, and soft in the he'd,
if we stood quietly by and saw this
glorius govment smashed to pecis eth
er by ftlrrin OF intestine foe. The
gentle harted muther hates to take her
nawty child across her knee, but she
nose it is her deWty too do it. So we
shall hate to whip the nawty South, but
we must do it if you don't make back
tracks at onct, and we shall woIlup you
out of your boots. J. Davis, it is my
decided opinion that the Sonny South
is making al egrejus mutton-hcd Of her
self"
st Oh sir, you're safe enuf, You
are too small powder for ne,o sed the
president of the Southern Conthicycr-
/ acy.
await till go home and start out
the BaIdinsvill Mounted Hoss Cavalry.
I'm Capting Of that Corpse, and j..
D avis, beware Jefferson D., now
leave you. Farewell my gay Saler
Boy. Good bye, my bold buccaneer :
Pirut of the deep blue sea, adoo :.
adoo -
Nv tower threw the Southern Con
thieveracy on my way home was thrill
lin ennif for yeller covers. 1t will form
the subjeck Of my next. Betsy Jane
and the progeny air we'll.
Yours respectively,
/ TV,,,t,, E',;- " ,rn