Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1861-12-27

curve, and next into some wide spreading
plain, where fresh beauties opened out to our
delighted gaze. Here we glided slowly DER
some tressilled bridge, or plunged quickly
il TO the dark recesses Of some yawning tunnel
whose Opaque mouth could almost be i'm.
agined the entrance to realms Internal p'
what depth of imagination !" ironically
Mrs. P.
"My love, allow me TO remark that there
are times when these bright scintillations Of
wit that so frequently emanate from your
prolific brain are quite acceptable, and duly
appreciated, but on an occasion like the
present, when, at your own solicitation, |
am unfolding a tale of horror / think your
facetious Interruptions are entirely out of
place, and certainly uncalled for. Begging
you will not offend again, | will once more
proceed with the tale:"
Now, we thundered DER some rustic
bridge, thrown across a mountain torrent,
sfirighting in our course myriads Of swal-
lows, whose clay. built nests adhered to the
rugged arch beneath, causing many fedge.
ling unwillingly to take that day its maiden
fight, end, failing in the buoyant task, fell
an easy prey to the sharp beak of the swoop-
ing hawk, who could De seen 'circling' far
above; Or escaping him, as night was draw
ing on apace did no doubt fall into the
clutches OF the no less cruel, mousing owl,
whose great, round eyes we're then peering
at US, from out the hollow of decayed syca-
more, that stood, sentinel like, at the edge of
q wood hard by.
Once again, as far as the eye could reach,
we saw vast expause of open country, dot
ttd here and there with small and picturesque
farm houses, in close proximity to each OF
which would loom up, amid the luxuriaut
foliage, monstrous barn, whose open door
looked as if about to swallow the dwelling
ard all the outer buildings on the premises
the roofs of which are invariably of a saugui
nary hue. A sort of Cpidemical rage for red
peIvsded that whole section, breaking out
in blo'Ches all over the face of the surround
ing country. Houses, barns, corn cribs, pig
styes and hen. coops, all bore the bloody
badge Eucompassing the whole, could be
seen the square and well-tilled fields, pro-
ducDg the various cereals common to the
soil, each having its distinct and peculiar
hue, the tout ensemble reminding one of a
BIobdignagian bed.quilt, the Squares being
Unfortunately thrown together. have an
indistinct recollection, during my bread and
butterhood, of seeing my thrifty grand
mother, God bless her memory putting to-
gether quilt of Just such pattern"
"But, good heavens Mr.. P, what has
your grandmother's bed quilt, and all the
other nonsense, got to do with Mr.. Swipes
pose2 Can't you cut it short and come to
the pointP
THANK you, my dear, / take. AS Dr..
Ollapod would say, that's very good-I owe
you one' But do not anticipate me, if you
please. l will reach that interesting feat
ure in a short time"
"While we were thus drinking in the
transcendent beauties of nature, and not for
getting, at the same time, to take an occa-
sional pull at our travelling companion
suddenly observed a peculiar expression on
Swipes' usually serene countenauce. A
deadly pallor o'erspread his face, and his
eyes seemed starting from their sockets
His wiry little top-knOt became more 6ercely
erect than ever, actually forcing his beaver
almost off his head. At the same moment,
in a voice tremulous with terror, he ex-
claimed; Good God Pop-Popkins, loo
look there 7 and pointing in the direction
which we were going, (at the rate of thirty
miles an hour,) | saw, at glance, the cause
Of his terrible emotion.
"Within a short distance l discsrned
bridge under which the cars must pass |
could also distinctly see where a portion of
the weal ealherboarding had been torn off, by
the tops of cars attached to train preced-
ing ours, and the first by the by, that had
ever gone over the road. But still the space
between the top of our car and the spliutered
weatherboavdipg of the bridge apparently
was no. more than foot. AS we both were
rather inclined to corpulency, | thought the
chances very much against us. All this of
course, passed through my brain with light
mig rapidity; but at the same moment OBJ
served that the smoke-stack of the engine
was nearly level with the tops of our heads.
bolt OF JOY shot through my heart as felt
assured Of our safety, and | was just about
to impart the happy discovery to my friend,
when, to my utter horror and dismay, saw
the pipe was being lowered by the engineer.
My heart sabk with that pipe. l gave up
all for lost. Twas too late TO Jump from
our peTilous position, even had we been so
disposed. 1t would, no doubt, have proved
fatal alternative bad we attempted it. AS it
was, all we could do was to lie fat upon our
backs and await our impending and dreadful
fate. | recollect how Isctewed and squirmed,
endeavOring to reduce the size of TINS port
mantesn' of mine. AS for poor Swipes he
commenced mumbling the only prayer that
he cou'd, in his terror, think of:
Now Ia. lay mo dOw;doTn tt, to Sleep
"Beiore be could finish his deyotions we
had passed under, and arose, breathless
with fright, but perfectly uninjured.
turned to look at Swipes. His beuevol ant
face was smeared with gore, yet a grim smile
| OF satisfaction pervaded it, proving how
! grateful be felt to find himself still in the
lapd of the living. With ludicrous expires.
sion of countenance that can never forget
he pointed toward his proboscia, and, on
close examination, l sscertained that his
elongated 'cut-water' had lost about an
eighth of an inch of its fair proportions g.
which, you are no doubt aware, makes q
considerable difference in the appearance o.
that prominent feature. 1t appears, as ht
slterward informed me, that he indiscrsetlJ
raised his head, supposing the danger passed
but unfortunately at that moment we wert
directly under the bridge. He still refers Il
the almost fatal affair occasionally when W,
meet, and always with long and mean
choy sigh. l said 10 him the other day:
"Swipes, my boy, we will have TO christel
that hoTrid bridge the bridge of sighs"
'Ah, DO, my friend" replied he; II shall
always be compelled to consider it thu
bridge of my nose.'
Then he laughed a sepuIchral laugh, tn
echo of which followed after him as he lef
NE and turned down the street.
And now, Mrs. p, having satisfied you
curiosity, wish you to understand that, a
it is sore subject, would like to go n
farther. I've related it to you in the fru
belief that you can keep a secret. Therefore
allow me again 10 caution you that althoug
I've told you the history of 'Swipes' nose
do not wish you to blOtO it."
An Irish lover remarked that dts grea
Measure TO he left alone especially Whel