Democrat and sentinel. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1853-1866, 1861-09-04
From the HOME JOURNAL.
MATRIMONIAL INFELICITIES.
BY A. IRRITABLE MAN.
Hy ,rite has a headache.

now my dear Z" 1 said TO my amlable spouse. /
who, on my return home from business, l found
with a white handkerchief tied about her head.
while strong scent Of campnor prevaded the
house.
Il shouldn't think you would have to ask
what is the matter, for you know 1 have one of
my terrible headaches" my wife replied.
''Well l am very sorry to hear it, 1 said
:" OF course you are very sorry to hear it,'' she
answered, Sc for you think 1 will not be able now
to attend to getting your dinner-''
Don't my dea-," 1 said, 50 worry about din
ner. There is necessity for you to 90 into the
kitchen. that am aware of, for the cook can get
dinner just as well as if you were there to direct
her,"
But the cook left me this morning. l would
have you understand. because would not allow
her to make fresh coffee for her breakfast. She
said that which we drank was not strong enough
for herr
We'll never mind it, answered, g am
glad she is gone. She is very wasteful and ex-
| travagant.'
''Oh. it is easy enough for You to say never
mind it and you are glad she is gone.' but you
don't have to get the dinners, and think. sup
pose, that I VIII go into the kitchen and prepare
/ the meals, till another cook arrives; but don't
/ intend to 10 it."
/ :. am sure l DO not wish you to, my DEAR
/ said. =. had much rather 90 without both
/ breakfast and dinner than for you to 90 into the
kitchen and prepare them"
. You say So" said my wife, - but you don't
mean it. You would rather have me slave to
death, and burn myself up over the range, than
go without your dinners. And now, when my
head aches so that 1 can hardly see, have got to
} 60 and get dinner for you''
t'Dut tell you, my DEAR" replied, " that
you need not. am Tot hungry. and can do
without any Ginrer today"
80 Then you must hive dined down town
That is the way you like to serve me. When
1 am Just ready to get a good dinner for you, and
have puzzled my brains all day thinking of what
| you would like to eat you come home and tell
me that you have no appetite, and have been to
dinner.''
{" Good gracious,'' exclaimed, - if you want
to get dinner for me, get it. won't stop
/ YOU"
:. Of course you wouldn't stop me,'' she an
swered. You'd let me get a dozen dinners for
you in one day, even when you had no appetite
to eat any of them"
:. You are certainly, my DEAR 1 said d" the
most unreasonable woman l ever met. Now
tell you distinctly, you may get me dinner or
not, as you plcase-do which ever you think
best, and shall be satisfied but if there be one
thing dislike more than another, 1t Is being obl-
ged to 90 without my dinner
:. OF course chimed in my wife, .. if I failed
to get dinner for You to-day should never hear
the last Of II. You pretend not to wish me to
get it, but if l didn 7, think there would be an
exciting time in this house. Tle innocent chill
dren would suffer. know, and l would be put
down with al kind Of expressions 1 knew you
were yexed the moment You entered the room
The ejaculation you made the moment you enter
Cd the room, and scented the camphor. couvin
/ ced me. that even If the hateful way In which
YOU threw your gloves into your hat, had not
becn sufficient Then, too, when you drew Of
your boots You De-: them fall heavily On the floor
as IL it delighted you to make my poor head ach
more. OH You men are cruel 20 your wives
, and you take pleasure in being So
Well, never mind, | said, 4" saying any
thing more about it. The fact Is. I have deci
ded 70 have my dinner, and if l can't Obtaii
there will 90 where l can. 1t seems to m
YOU make great fuss about a headache
In my opinion a headache Is the hghte.
of all malad'eS. Quiet and cold water bandagC
are better than camphor and loud talking, whic
are the usual Accomplishments Of headaches il
e this house. Listen if you lie down th
+, lounge, and won't speak another word to-nigl
I'll get my own dinner"
Instead of following my advice, my wife bega
: TO weep. Now, If there be one one thing dis
t like more than another, it is to see woman
n tears | essayed to soothe my wife, but 81
: would not be soothed.
YOU choose" she said, q to make sport
. me and my headache, cannot prevent it /; b
you'll be sorry for it by and by. 1 sometim,
think we shall not live together much longer
50 Now my DEAR" l said, 1" don't speak 81
Is your health is pretty good, notwithstandir
these troublesome headaches. / think indee
Is we may both live many years yet"
(, Z" On have no doubt,'' she replied, ''but th
At we shall both exist a score of years longer ON
q 1 :hink 1t doubtful if live together. Yo
Of treatment of me IS cruel, that l fear we sh.
% separate. And am sure none of my frien
r. would censure me for it, if they only knew wh
1 suffer and endure. For nine years have Dor
), with your irritabili:y, hoping, that you grt
> older, you would overcome it but on the &C
trary, it seems TO increase upon you, until n'
there is scarcely an hour passes, when you are
the house, but you are fault finding and cav
Is ling at something. You can't endure to knC
Id that am sick, even though / don't compla
and keep my sufferings 70 myself
- a y