Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1861-01-25
water.--A Splendid Description.

in Texas, advertised Bar6acue. with bet
ter liquor than was ever furnished. When
the people were assembled, desperate il
the crowd cried out
MIR. Paul Denton. your Rirerc'lcc las
lied. You promised US not only good
barbecue, but better liquor. Where is
the iquor?"
There" !" answered the Missionary, in
tones of thunder; and pointing his mo-
tionless finger at the nlatcbless Double
Spring, gushing up in two strong columns,
with sound ike shout of joy from tie
bosom OF the earth. There" he repeat
ed, with a look terrible as the Lightning,
while bis enemy actually trembled on bis
feet; There IS the liquor, which God,
the eternal, brews for all his children =
Not in the simmering Still, over smoky
fires choked with poisonous gases, and
surrounded with the stencil of sickeninc
odors and rank corruptions, doth your Fa-
/ ther in Heaven prepare the precious es-
sence Of lie, the pure cold water, but in
the green glade and grassy deli. where the
red deer wanders, and the child loves to
play, there God brews it; and down, low
down in the deepest valleys where the
| fountains murmur and the rills sing; and
high up on the mountain tops, where the
naked granite glitters like gold in the sun,
where the storm-cloud broods and the
thunderstorms crash and away far out
on the wide, wild sea, where the hurricane
howls music, and the big waves roar the
chorus sweeping the march of God,-the1e
lie brews it, that beverage of life, health
giving water. And everywhere it is a
thing OF beauty; cleaning in the dew drop;
singing in the summer rain; shining in the
lce-gem till the trees all seem turned to
living jewels-spreadirg a golden veil over
the setting sun, or white gauze around
the midnight moon; sporting in the cata-
ract sleeping in the glacier; dancing II
the hail shower folding its bright snow
curtains softly about the wintry world and
weaving the many colored iris, that SER
aph-zone of the sky. whose warp is the
raindrop of earth, whose Woof is The sun
| beam Of HEAVIER, all decked with celestial
flowers, by the mystic hand of refraction.
Still it is always beautiful-that blessed
life-watcr. No poison bubbles on its
brink its foam brings no madness and
murder; no blood stains its liquid glass
pale widows and starving orphans weep
not burning tears in its depths; no drunk
ards shrieking ghost from the grave curses
it in words of eternal despair Speak out,
my friend, would you exchange it for the
demon of Alcoholic"
A DOUBLE FooL.--A woman is either
worth great deal or nothing. IF good
for nothing she is not worth getting ieal-
GUS for; if she be true woman, she will
give no cause for jealousy. A man is q
brute to be jealous of good woman-a
fool to be jealous of q worthless one but
double fool to cut his throat for either of
them.
Fanny Fern lately said: If one-balf
of the girls only knew the previous lives Of
the men they marry, the list of old maids
would be wonderfully increased" But
the Boston Post asks If the men knew,
Fanny, what their future lives were to be
wouldn't it increase the list Of old maids
still farther!"
1t has heen decided in the supreme
court at Buffalo, that railroads have a
right to specify on their passenger tickets
the time within which they may be used
The case was brought by purchaser Of
one Of the three days S. tickets, issued
during the celebrated competition, and
what he presented for the balance of the
trip six days after its date had expired
Does this razor go easy? asked bar
Der of victim who was writhing under a
clumsy instrument whose chief recommend
alton was strong handle. Well, replied
the poor fellow, that depends upon what
you call this operation. If you're skinning
me, it goes tolerable easy; but if you're
shaving me, it goes rather hard
A countryman took bis seat at tav-
ern table opposite gentleman who was
indulging-in bottle of wine. Supposing
the wine to be common property, our
friend helped himself to it with the GEN
tleman's glass. That's COOL exclaimed
the owner Of the wine, Indignantly Yes,
I should think there was ice init
i will and bcquath, said an Irishman
in his will, to my beloved wife, all my
property without reserve, and to my old
est son, Patrick, one half the remainder,
and to Dennis, my youngest son, the rest.
If anything is left, it may go to Terrence
! AlcCarty, in sweet Ireland.
A young lady, in reply to her fathers
questions W by she did not wear rings up
on her fingers, said -
Because. papa, they hurt ne when any
body squeezcs my hand.
What business have you to have your
hand squeezed?
Certainly none, but still you know pa
pa, one would like to keep in squeczable
order.
1t is rumored, and apparently upon
good authority, that Mr. Buchanan has as
snred the South that, while he can never
recognize the de tacto Government of s.
C, or any other separate State seeding,
it would not be inconsistent with his for.
mer position to recognize government
embracing three or more States.
A young man has been victimizing
the people of Norwich by delivering and
collecting pay for bogus telegraphic dis
patches. The only mark of being genuine
which thev nossessed was that thew uara