The weekly Ottumwa courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1857-1872, 1861-04-10
DOcsticks last call ON New Year.

DOcsticks last call ON New Year.
Made our last call at Wilken' s--four
daughters and mother. Strange effects of
lobster salad! nearly every young man who
came in had some fault to. find with some
body else's lobster-saad; il seemed to have
made them all very thick in the speech, and
very thin in the legs. Young Tiddleboy
and friend came in. r. addressed Miss
Phiista Wilkens somewhat after the style:
"Good New-Yr's Philus Melisty; don't
look at meat my friend; he's been drink
ing lobster salad, but he's all sober-all
sober sore I, maa'm. Many happy lob
sters-no, returns, mean, of course, of
this 'spicious cayshun. Thank you, mum.
How's the old woman, your father THAT
is, your father, the old woman. Yes'm,
very plasant weather out doors; would've
have brought you some if I'd know'd you'd
like half pint. Your very g'delth, man,"
Tiddleboy, now under the impression that
some body had given him something to
drink, picked up Miss Phlista's cark- basket
and put it to his lips, and. having thus up
81 the cards all over the floor. reproved his
friend Indignantly for spillng his loster. sailed
in peoples eyes.
His friend, meanwhile had been alter
nately wishing the piano-stool happy New
Years, and trying to shake hands with the
chandelier, and had at last seated himself
on the center. table. and was calling for a
boojack to put on his slippers with. They
were finally got out of the way but not
utnil Tiddleboy's friend who had staggered
against the sofa, had half pulled off his coat,
and offered to fight that belligerent article
of furniture, if anybody'd make ring on
the piano.
Then came Peggins and his friend. Peg
gins Immediately put up his umbrella to
keep off the rain; excused himself on the
score oflobster- salad; was helped to refresh
ments; mixed his coffee with his picked
oysters, stirred the compound with his pen
knife, poured it out on sheet of music, laid
another sheet over it and tried to bite piece
out under the impression that it was sand
wich. When the mess he thus made of
his shirt-front had been somewhat cleared
away, he noticed it for the first time, and
said he hoped Mrs. Wilkens would excuse
him if he put up his umbrella gain-which
he at once did
And so on for dozens; fellows all suffer
ing from violent attacks of lo5ster-salad, ap-
parently, for all complained of it; some Of
them tried to wipe their faces on the door
mat, which they picked up in the hall, un-
der the conviction that it was a pocket
handkerchief; some tried to drink out otthe
oyster-tureen, and muttered something in
coherent about salad one held up his plate
before him like looking glass, and tried to
comb his hair with pickle-fOrk; one
brought his new hat into the parlor with
him, sat down on if, and couldn't get out oi
it till it was taken away in small pieces by
Bridget, at whom he winked. and suggested
little more lobster, too; one marched up
to an oil potrait of Mrs. Wilkens, held ou,
his handkerchief, and asked to have more
sugar put in his punch; another addressed
the bronze statue of Appollo as "waiter," and
asked for a little more lobster-salad, and a
plate, by which name he designated the
sherry decanter, which, he presented bottom
up.
And, In fact nine out of ten who called
after noon were in such condition of lob
ster-salad that not single one who could
positively tell his head from hay-mow
vet not one of them refused to drink al.
though some of them had difficulty in fin.
ding the way to their mouths, and their
stolnachs were often times in a state Of reyo
lstion.
William H. Russell, the special cores
pondent Of the London Times, Ga Chic
among us taking notes, and faith he'll prin
'em, has been spending several days a
Washington. and left on Saturday for th'
South, stopped in Richmond and Cha. .lestor
as the first two points. He had pleasan
interview with Secretary Seward on Thurs
day last.
CoMpLMENTARY--VERY!-The Charleston
Courier, in recent article noticing and com
plimcnting the chief actors in tie dsuniol
drama, closes thus; "Nor can we fail to no
tice in an especial manner the distinguished
part borne by Almighty God in this blood
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