Daily national Democrat., 1861-10-12
Artemus Wards Opinion of Four Great
Characters.
HOWELL COBB,
SEc'Y TREAs'Y G. 5. A.,
1f01li0O,uprU. Ala.

NAPOLEON BoNApARTE Napoleon the
Grand. The Britishers scooped him at Wa
terloo. lie wanted to do too much and he
did itl They scooped him in at Waterloo
and he subsekently died at st. Heleny =
There's where the greatest military man this
world ever produced pegged out. 1t was
rather hard to consine such IA man as him to
st. lIeleny to spend his larst days in catchin
mackerl, and walking up and down the
dteary beach in a military cloak drawn titely
round him (see pcer bools), but so it was
lied Of the army" Them was his last words
SO he had bin. He was CRATE Don't wish
we had a pair of his old boots to command
sum OF our brigades"
ALEXANDER THE GREAT -"Alxander the
CRATE was punkins,' | coutinnered, but Napo
leon was punkinser! Alic wept becaws there
was no more words to scoop, and then took
to drinkin. He drowndd his sorrers in the
| flown bole, and the howin boe was too much
for him. 1t ginray is. He undertook to
Civ a snake exhibition in his boots but it
killed him. That was bad joke for Alic
Christopher CoLuMBUs-It cost Columbus
twenty thousand dollars to fit out his ex-
plorin expedition If he had been a sensible
man he d hav put the money in hoss rail-
road or gas company, and left magnificent
continent to the intelligent savages, who
when they got hold of coed thing knew
enuif to keep it, and who wouldn't hav Sc
ceded, nor rebeiled nor knockt Liberty in
the head with Il slungshot. Columbus wasn't
much of a feller nfter all. 1t would have
bin money in my pocket if he'd staid at
home. Chris. meant well, but he put his
foot IN it when he sailed for America.
The NATIONAL BmD.-The American Ea
gle has lived too sumptuously of late his
stummic becum foul, and hes now takin a
Site emetic. That's all. We're gettin ready
to strike big blow and a sure one When
we do strike, the fur will fly and secession
will be in the hands of the undertakers, sheet
ed for SO deep a grave that nothing short of
Gabriel trombone will ever awaken it. Mind
what | say. You've heard the Snowman
GENERAL LYoN.--The soil Of Connecticut is
to receive the remains of the hero, whose
fame is bright portion of the treasures of
the ever revered and noble Common alth
that gave him birth. lie will sleep among
the heroes, the sages the statesmen, and the
learned of that renowned State. His life
since the rebellion began its blighting coul Sc
in Missouri, has been molly and benehcialy
devoted to the welfare of his country, and ne
! man won more rapidly, or held more firmly
the applause of the people of the UniteC
States. lie was as insensible TO fear as any
mortal that ever lived, and he enjoyed tie
unhounded confidence of his troops lie wa.
at their head, cheering them to follow hin
into the thickost of the fight, when he re-
ceived his death wound. He fell as the he
roes of Bunker Hill, Of y yorktown, of Prince
ton fell, fighting for the independence, the
Union Of his country. The genius of Collins
seems to have been inspired by just sucI
men as General Lyon:
How sleep the brave, who sink to rest,
BY all their country's wishes blessed
When Spring, with dewy fingers cold,
Returns to deck their Eal,ow d mould,
She there shall dress IA sweeer sod
Than Fancy's feet have ever trod.
BY fry hands their kncl is rung
BY forms unseen their drge is sung;
Their Honor comes, Il pilgrim gray,