Weekly Trinity journal., 1861-09-28
Ar,crnu. ward Visit. Buchanan.

Me and Betsev Jane was taukn over matters
and things mite after we had retired to the boo.
sum of the famcrly. as the pot feenly remarks,
and | was nifty oneasy and thrashed round consi-
dcrabul kickin orr the Guilt and making mself
disa graeabel ginerally | reckon, for Betsey at
larst riz rite mp and SEE Betsey SEE she Artemus
Ward Wal seq !, Botsey, that's my cursin name,
saw on. What on airth'S the matter on ye sez
she. With that turned over and groaned. Be4
I eould say pouder, Betsey jumped clean out
abed and begun scratchin on her miscellaneous as
ortmnnt Of dri goods which they was lyin round
loose. Then rE on end and srz Betsey what
now. Imp goin fur the doctor seq she. Srz !,
in an atexhumate tOan Of voise Betsey sez doant
be fool. Law, Artemus sez she yer scarf me
out of my skin. (Brtsry thinks powerhe site
Of me.) What is wayn on your mind she con
tinnered. Srz | Ime goin to Washington SEE
Betsey seq she, putty spunky. now don't yoa he a
fool they doant kare n0hnk aboht your wacks
wuks. Haven't they got Kongriss and the stat
ute of jackson and hale cOnmby and Wigtaul
and-Ordpr cride you're gettn onparlymentGra
Betsey Jane. aynt gon to take my wacks
wnrks I've eeced nm to Barnum Ime gOin to
save the kedentry. and back up Onkle Samuel
agin these onsirkumcized crccennizrrs. Ef Git
a holt OF that air lverzn from Georgy lie teach
him a short hand Of skinnin skunks by gcrusa-
lem, std !, htlin the bowlstcr a tremenjus bio.
0 that's it sed she. Ys scz /. Wal seq she line
goin too. Greed scd |. httin Betsey a loVin
whack atwetn the shoulders which brot teers into
her ne. With that she fell t0 calatin about her
gingam dress and her worstid stockins etsettery
and so4th, and we ntvur slep wink. Mex NOR
min Betsty had Breakfast out the way bed dalite,
and at nyne o'clock the same evenin we was in
the sete of govurmnnt in proprier pprsony as the
apostle obsurves. Govnur Kas wOr watin in the
dppott. knoe the GOVnur long ago as when he
was Guvnur of Michigan. Srz Guvnur Il alwus
] kam Id On KANGAROO
ef | aynt glad TO see ye. Prrsidunt seat ye fur
me tb y? Scz he Mister Ward heve you sene Mis-
ter Lncun. Sez | hev. Srz he tlen you're Just
the | the Presidun wants to see. | and the
Guvnur and Miss Ward got into a hak and druv
inkog (onbenone to eny of them kongriss iellers)
strate to the White House.
I hOpt out fust ben as The Guvnur is leetle
dp rpd i tawl chap stood at the foor and
when i hplpt out Miss Ward he stratened hisself
up and spd be gesstd thare was sum mistake
Wele see about that sez !. gest you cum here and
Civ us lift Go way srz he, leve, be ori-gest
then the Guvnur shode his he'd at the hack d0re
and the wa that kritter came doun bowin and
scrapin was kauton to Miss Ward for she stuff
most of her shaul into her m0wth bed she could
dri up an abstruprus larf We w0s TUX ImeJitly
TO the Presidunt's room There wOs himself, Miss
Lane Pawler George, Rob and Daniel Sickles.-
Awl rose. The scene at that hosspicions moment
wos impOsn. The Guvnursez he Mister Presdunt
al0l me 10 lntTnJhce ANTEMuS w AhD-A teiuus
Ward, the Presidunt of the United States, geEt so
he sed it, / grasped bis hand aud l'ohin him ful
in the l. raz,d mi lett hand and asked in ira
gerdy VOise IF herrd ritr--3cdS he the presldunt
of the United States ? You mite hev hurd a pin
drop. must did it powerfe. Ode seen Ned
Forrist act ont king ltre too mites bed. The
Presiduni kinder wilted, miss lane blusht; Betsey
Jane stood bye as strate and prowd as an lnJun
Are thare eny stars gOn from our p0litikal furma
munt showtd |, stOnpin mi foot aud tittenin mi
grasp so't he RACED his hind leg and winsed. Dan
couldn't stand it and mizled Pawl wor very red
in the Ease. and as fur kOh--the mserbul SHIELD
koh of popt korn (goaks, like murder, will out)
walnut sed-he lef Tor Georgy mex da. The
Guvnnr wos karin as a quaker meetin house and
enjoyed The fd6/0 penang Il must beg parding fur
usin the drd langwiches, but it is so appropoh)
! prosedd in the same strare, lrttin 60 the Pres
idunts hand and sandn grasttully at ese Sur
sed whrnse this wild tumult, is it becaws Lin |
Gun is elected which he couldn't help 1t ef he /
wanted to? Wots Caliny goin to ceces fur p
Who's hurt um? wy don't thay waite I'll thayre hurt !
Who vilates the constito0Shun2 Sur you put
your phinger on the vilashuns of the north and
He put mi ten on the vilashuns of the South and
shall want phoriy mOar hands with 10 phngers to
eech To kuvur um. You gdin to ignoar that p
Ihd gOin to ignoar it and Xprck nobody nose II!
Lets hev rersun aud kuThmun cense. Lets hev
bruthprl Inv and respr0sity. Niggers tia air
tha foH mark that if white forks dOant stop the
row. Sur air yer kOnshense keer? hev you dun
rite by kanzas hev you plaid into the hand OF
the stcessprs or hrv you knot hev you KEEP your
othe of offs under deep sens of d0oti TO god or
wos that Plus gam Haynt the lows and fishes
and luv of powr and pef aud kottun and ire trad
and fre niggers and part assendensi and dema-
pogara aud oilegarky ginrral eussidniss and
wickdniss moar to do with this krcis than eny-
thing els
THE old publi,l funckshunary turned pail.
porcd the truth into him like sope sud2 into
sink. Arfter kechn bis breth be sez Mister
Ward, | unsand you We he'd intervoo with Mis-
Ter Lincun. Gest cum from seein him sez l.
Whattle he do srd he. He told nae, sed | that't
he'd obay the cOnstitushun aud the laws, and his
cabnt should do likrwys, ana he'd employ the
hui strength of the govurnmeit to presurve, and
proteck y defend the t0nstitushun ak0rdin to his
Othe. Farther lhoar sed ], hele do gest what
you haint dun-rentoIce tOart Moltre and send
steTne trigate TO Charleston harhOr ! to mohee
/ to Savanna to Appleachola | orr new Orleens
with orders TO keelhaul the fust man who under
takes to cecess Mister Lincun SEE tawks' gest
like Henry Clay uset to, and ef he axis as well RS
he tawks htle be a prase to them as do wei and
terrer to evil doers, and et he dOant HeHs time
TO iii in the Ease OF provo vdence, and tare the stripes
in twanp, aud ring The mex of the Egal prOwd
bird and maik Yankee doodle a fool and dys-
grace ourselves IN the OF lne rest OF inahhlhd-
hear | br0ak down and couldn't speke for lump
in mi wnpipe. puld out mi bandanah and wep
in sylens. Mis- lane was karfrd out fantein Bet
Spy Jane ade her he'd on my shoulder, the Gnv-
nur flung hissef on the sofia, and the old funck-
summary nee2 nockt together At length we
recovered our komp0sure. BY that time twars
mdnite. The presidunt took mi hand agin in
suijude manner, and thankt me fur cumn TO see
him, and sed hede talk ksre oil foart MoleIre eff il
want too late. We s'shode to bed bi the tawl
chap aud mex da kane hoam.
LARGEST FORTRESS IN THE W0RLD-Eighteen
miles from Warsaw stands the largest fortress in
the word-a fortress with classmates aud bomb
proof barracks for 40, 600 men, aud with circum-
terence OF eleven miles. 1t is known as the
Madliu. or New Georgian; in Russian, Novo-Gior-
gietsk No stranger can visit it without the
special permission of the Gear.