Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1861-10-11

ana IL show you place where old hat
,, a'r stuffed into broken winders, where tL
children are dirty and ragged, where gate
nav no hinges, where the wimin dir sin
shod, and where maps Of the devils will
land ali painted upon mems shirt-Sosum
with tobacco jooce! That's wha, Ill SHOW
you. Let us consider what the preacher,
do for us before we aboose EN-"
He sed he didn't mean to aboose the cler
sy' Not at all, and he was happy TO Sc,
that was interested in the Bonypart family
:" It's CRATE family" sed |. Bu, the,
scooped the old man n.'
How, sir ?"
Napoleon the Grand. The Bririsher.
scooped him at Waterloo. Tie wanted /,
do too much, and he did it They SCOPE,
him in at Waterloo, and he subsekenI,
died at ST. IIeleny! There's where til,
greatest military man this world ever pro
jooced pegsed out. 1t was rather hard tc
consne such d man as him to st. Iteleny
to spend his last days in catchin mackeril
and walkin up and down the dreary beach
in military cloak drawn titely round him
(see pietur books,) but so it was. He'd Of
the Army Them was his larst words
So he had been. lie was CRATE Don't
wish we had pair of his old boots to com.
mand sum of our Brigades 2"
This pleased Jerome, and he took me
warmly by the hand
Alexander the Crate was punkins." T
continnered, d" But Napoleon was punkins
err. Alic wept becaws there was no more
worlds to scoop. and then took to drinkin.
f>lIe drowneid bis sorrers in the flowing bole,
and The flowin bole was too much for him.
II gineraly is. He undertook 10 civ a
snake exhibition in his boots but it killed
him. That was bad joke for Alic."
"Since you are so solicitous about France
and the Emperor, may | ask you how your
own country is Gettin alongs" said Jerome
in pleasant voice.
Its mixed" | sed. " But think we
shall cum out all right
"Columbus, when he diskivercd this
magnificent continent, could have had no
idee of the grandeur it would one day as
soom,' sed the Prints.
at cost Columbus twenty thousand dol
lars TO fit out his explorin expedition" sed
!. "If he had bin a sensible man he hav
put the money in horse railroad or gas
company, and left this magnificent conti-
nent TO the intelligent savages, who when
they got hold of good thing knew enuff
to keep it, and who woaldn't have seeded
MOI rebelled nor knoet Liberty in the he'd
with slungshot. Columbus wasn't much
Of feller after all 1t would have bin
money in nay pocket If he'd staid to home.
Chris. meant well, but he put his foot in it
when he sailed for America"
We talked sum more about matters and
things, and at larst ! riz TO go. q l will now
say good bye TO you, noble sir, and good
luck to you. Likewise the same to Clo-
Tidy. Also TO the gorgeous persons which
compose your SCOT. If the Emperor's boy
don't like livin at the Tooleries, when he
gifts older, and would like TO embark in the
show bizness, LET him come with me, and
Ill make a man of him. You find us sum-
what mixed, as | before obsarved, but come
agin next year and you'll find us clearer
nor ever. The American Eagle has lived
too sumptuously Of late-his stummic be-
cum foul and he's now taking slight emet.
ic. That's all. We're getiin ready to strike
a big blow and sure one. When we do
strike the fur win fly and secession will be
In the hands of the undertaken, sheeted for
so deep grave that nothing short of Ca
briel's trombone will ever awaken tt
Mind what ] say. You've heard the show
man
Then advisin him to keep away from the
Peter Funk auctions of the East, and the
proprietors of corner lots in the West, /
bid him farewell, and went away.
There was a levee at Senator What's
his-name's and thought Id jine in the fes- |
tivities for spell. Who should see but
she that was Sarah Watkins, now the wife |
Of our Congresser, trippin in the dance,
dressed up to kill in her store close. Sa-
rahs father used to keep little grosery
store in our. town and she used TO clerk it |
Tor him in busy times. | was rushin up TO
shake hands with her when she turned on
ier heel and tossin her head In a con-
iemptous manner. walked away from me
very rapid. " Halo, SAL" hollered, F" can't
you measure me out quart of them best
! may want a Goldfish, also!"
guess this reminded her of the little red
tore, and the days of her happy child
rood"
But / fell in with nice little gal after
hat, who was much sweeter than Sally's
aiher's melasses, and l axed her if we
houldnt glide in the messy dance. She
cd we should, and we Glode.
| intended to make this letter very seris,
'ut few goaks may hav accidentally crept
n. Never mind. Besides, think ii i'm