Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1861-09-21
HOW JIM BLANDER sALrEp AND
PECKLED THE QUAKER FRIEND.
A STORY FOR OUR OWN TINES.

HOW jim BLANDER sALrEp AND
PECkLED THE QUAKER FRIEND.
STORY FOR OUR OWN TINES.
There lived in q certain neighborhood not
Tar distant from here, q aroystering, rowdy bull
ly, Jim Blander. Jim was "sum' in fight,
q kind Of pugilistio Napoleon Many and
bloody were the affairs be had had in his life
time, and had invariably come OF best. Jim
not only considered himself invulnerabls, but
all the fighting characters in the surrounding
country conceded 1t was no use in fighting Jim,
rs he was considered to be patent thrashing
machine, that could not be improved on. = In
Jim's neighborhood had settled quite num-
ber Of QuEkers. From some cause or other,
Jim hated the g shad- bellies as he called
them, with his entire heart; he often declared
that to whip one Of these inofensive people
would be the crowning glory of bis life. For
years Jim waited for a pretext. One of Jim 3
chums overheard young Quaker speak In dis
paraging terms Of him. The reports soon
came to Jim's ears, not little magnifed.
Jim made desperate threats what he was going
to do with Nathan, the meek follower Of Penn,
on sight; besides various bruises and contu-
stems he meant TO inhict on Nathan's body, in
his chaste language, he meant to gouge out"
both bis eyes and ''chsw off, both his ears.
Nathan heard of Jim's threats, and very
properly kept out Of his way, hoping that time
would modify Jim's anger. 1t seems, however,
this much-to- be-desirsd result did not take
place. One day friend Nathan was out riding,
and in passing through long lane, when about
midway, he espied Jim entering the other end.
Nathan might have turned and fed, but his
flesh rebelled at this proceeding. / will
pursue my way peaceably," said the Quaker,
" and hope the better sense Of the man Of
wrath will not permit him to modest me or al
low him to do violence to my person" Ma
than's calculations as to the lamb like qualities
of bis adversary were doomed to be disap-
pointed. 49,.
30, OH" thought bully, as he recognised
Eathan, 4" / have him at last. Now I'll make
mincemeat Of shad-belly. Twill salt him and
pickle him, too
"Wilt thou please dismount from thy horse?"
said Jim, seizing the bride Of Nathan's horse
aud mimicking his style; my soul yearneth
above all things to give thee the biggest maui
ing ever man received"
"Friend James," replied Nathan, thou
must not molest me, but let me 90 on my way
in peace. Thy better Judgment will surely
tell thee that thou cannot possibly be benefited
by personally injurifg me-"
''Get down in q moment" thundered jim;
"gst down, you canting, lying, mischief max
ing cowardly hypOcrite. I'll drag you down
If you don't dismount."
Friend James, I demonstrate against thy
proceedings and against thy language" replied
Nathan. My religion teaches me sincerity;
am neither q liar, a mischief maker, nor a
hypoorite; / am no coward, but q man of
peace; desire to pursue my way quietly-lst
me pass on"
SECT down." persisted Jim; down with
you; L want to beat some Of your religion out
Of you; l must give you a fogging before
leave you. think by the time I'm through
with you, you'll pass for a tolersbly decent
man; III teach you q short and easy lesson on
the importance Of minding your own affairs
and the risk you run in slsndering your neigh
bOrs."
"rwill not dismount," +" said Nathan, firmly;
loosen thy hold from the bridle.''
"Yos won't, won't your said Jim; 4" then
here goes, and he made desperate plunge
to collar the Quaker.
Nathan was on his feet in an instant, on the
opposite side Of the horse. The Quaker, al
though of much smaller proportions that his
prosecutor, was all sinew and muscle, and his
well-knit form denoted both activity and
strength. His wrath was evidently kindled
"Friend James," he implored, "thy peril
naeious persistence in prosecuting me is annoy
ing; thou must desist or peradventure 1 may
% far forget myself as to do thee some bodily
harm"
"By snakes" said Jim, coming toward Ma
than, II believe there is fight enough in broad
brim to make the affair interesting / wish
some Of the boys were here to see the fun
Now, friend Nathan, am going to knock off
the end Of your nose; lookout"
Suiting the action to the word, Jim, after va
riOus pugilistic gyratiOns with his fists, made a
scientific blow at the nasal formation Of our
Quaker friend; but Tom Hyer couldn't more
scientifically have warded it of.
Jim was evidently disconnected at the ill
success Of his first attempt; he saw be had un-
dertaken quite as much as he was likely to ac-
complish. Jim, however, Strengthened himself
out, and approached Nathan more cautiously
The contest began again. Nathan stood his
ground firmly, and uarded of the shower Of
blows skifully, which Jim aimed at him.
Friend james, said Nathan, in the heat
OF the CONTEXT, "this is mere child's play 1t
grieves me that thou hast forced me into resist
ance, but must defend myself from bodily
harm / see there is but one way of bringing
this scandalOus and wicked affair to a close
azd that Is by ooDquering thee in order to do
this, will infict heavy blow between thine
out the suggestion, Nathan struck Jim a tre.
mendous blow on bis forehead, which brought
him senseless to the ground
Now" said Nathan, - will teach thee a
lesson, and hope it will be q wholesome les
son, too. / will seat myself astride of thy
breast; L will place my knees upon thy arms,
thus, 50 that thou cannot injure me when thou
returnest to consciousness. I hope may be
the humble instrument Of tanning thy fierce
warlike nature, and make q better and more
respectable man of thee
As the Quaker concluded, Jim began TO show
signs Of returning life. The FIRST impulse of
Jim, when he fairly saw his condition, was to
turn Nathan of. He struggled desperately,
bat be was in svice-his effort was unayaiIing
Friend, thou must keep still until am
done with thee" said Nathan. 81 believe I
am an humble instrument in the hands of God
b chastise thee, and trust when am done
with thee thou wilt be changed man.
Friend James, does thee not repent Of attack
ing me?" .H'.
"NO," said James; "lst me up, and I'll show
you" = -
win not let thee up. impious wretch, -
replied Nathan; "dsrest thou profane the name
OF thy Maker? will punish thee for that-I
will check thy respiration for q moment
Nathan, as good as his word, clutched him
by the throat. He compressed his grip, as a
gurgling sound could be heard; Jim g fs~e be-
came distorted; tremor ran through his
frame. He was evidently undergoing q pro-
cess Of strangulation. The Quaker RELAXED his
hold, but not until the choking process had
sufficiently, as be thought, tanned the perverse
spirit Of Jim. II took some moments for Jim
to inhale sufficient air to address the Quaker.
81 will knock under" said Jim; s.enough;
let me up"
No, thou hast not got half enough, replied