Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1861-02-28

the latest date the grocery man was attempt
ling to figure up the profit on the beer.
p@- During the reign Of James H., whel
the King was much disliked for his op
preston and the number of taxes imposed
on the people, his majesty, in the progress
of tour, stopped at Sudbury, in Suffolk
when the corporation resolved to address
him; but, as the mayor did not posses
much literature, it was settled that the
town clerk should be his prompter. Being
introduced to the Kings presence, thu
town clerk whispered to the trembling
mayor:
Hold up your head, and look like
man.
His worship, mistaking this for the be
ginning of speech, repeated aloud to the
King, hold up your head, and look like q
man,
The town clerk, in amaze, again whis
pered him, 'What do you mean by this
sir /?
The mayor, in the same manner, repeat
ed,
sWhat do you mean by this, SIR :"
The town clerk, alarmed, whispered more
earnestl "
Il tell you, sir, you'll ruin US ALL
The mayor, still imagining this to be
part of his speech, concluded his matchless
performance with, Il tell you, SIR, youA
rain us all.
A SON OF ERIN once accosted Rever-
end disciple Of Swedenburg thus
"Mr. -, you say that we are to fol-
low the same business in Heaven that we
do in this world.
ayes, that is in perfect accordance with
reason, for the Creator himself is not idle,
and should his creatures be?'
"Well, then, yer honor, do people die
there ?"
"Certainly not; they are as immortal as
the Creator himself"
"Thin l should like to know, yer honor,
what they'll find for me to do-for I'm a
Craze digger in this world"
1t is hardly necessary to add that the
Reverend gentlemen was completely non.
plussed, and discharged Pat without giving
him the required information.
s@ An exchange says little incident
transpired some weeks ago at one of our
Frankfort hotels, which is worthy of no.
tice.
A little girl entered the bar.room, and
in pitiful tones said that her mother had
sent her to get eight cents.
Eight cents !? says the keeper.
yes, sir.
what does your mother want with eight
cents? / don't owe her anything"
sWell,' said the child, father spends all
bis money here for rum, and we have had
nothing to eat oday. Mother wants to
buy loaf of bread
A loafer remarked to the bar-keeper to
skick the brat out
NO. says the keeper, I'll give her the
money, and if the father comes back again,
I'll kick him out
ng- Strolling leisurely about Uncle Sans
big ship. yard, in Washington, the other
day, we observed regular hard.weather
sailor chap from man. o war, who, in turn,
was watching two men drag seven foot
cross-cut saw through huge live. oak log.
The saw was dull, the log terrible hard,
aud there they went, see.saw, pull, push,
push, pull. Jack studied the matter over
a while, until he came to the conclusion
they were pulling to see who would get the
saw; and as one was monstrous big chap,
while the other was little fellow, Jack de-
cided to see fair play; SO taking the big
one clip under the ear, that capsized him,
end over end, he jerked the saw out of the
log, and giving it to the small one, sung
out, "Now you run, you bugger."
LOTS OF GAME.-A few days ago, a
stranger stopped near Ren's Iron Works
he took his gun in hand and started for
sh 10y, following the traces Of his prede.
cessors, hoping that he might bag few
birds, or "somethiug else" After travel