Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes County, Ohio) 1856-1865, 1861-05-30
@Hs has retired"

wall, my pretty derrs, sez l, '1eti
have some fun. Let's play Puss in tn
corner. What say?'
i "Air you Shakeri" they axed.
avail, my pretty dears, / havn't array
ed my proud form in long weskit yit
but if they was all like you, perhaps II
jine 'em. As it is, I'm a Shaker protein
porary."
They was full of fun. I seed that al
fust, only they was little skeery. Itawl
'em Puss in the corner, and sich like plase
and we had nice time, keepin quiet o.
course so the old man wouldn't hear.-
When We broke up sez /, "my pretty dears,
ear / 60 you bav no objections, hav you
to innersent kiss at partin?" 7
"Yay," they sed, and yay'd.
II went up stairs tn bed / spose III
bin snoozin half hour when was awoke
up by a noise at the door. 1 sot up in
bed, leanin on my elbors and rubin my
eyes, and 1 saw the follerin picter: The
Elder stood in the doorway, with taller
candle in his hand. He hadn't no wearin
apparel on except bis night close, which
| fluttered in the breeze like fourth of July
Flag. He sed, "You're man of sin p
then groaned and went away.
/ went TO sleep sgin, and dremt Of rur-
min orf with the pretty little Shakeresses,
mounted on my California Bar. / ihawt
tie Bar insisted on steerin strate for my
door-yard in Baldinsyille and that Betsy
Jane cum out and gave us q warm recep-
shun with painful of bilin water. was
awoke up airly by the Elder. He sed re-
freshments was reddy for me down stairs.
Then sayin I was a man of sin, he went
groanin away 5.ar ma
As I was goin threw the entry to the
room where the vittles was, Icum across
the Elder and the old female I'd met the
night before, and what dye spose they
was up to? Huggin and kissin like young
lovers in their. ugshingest state. SEE l
"my Shaker friends, l reckon you'd better
suspend the rules and git married u
You must excoos Brother Uriah, sed the
female; he's subject to fits and hain't got
no command over himself when he's into
'em."
"Sartaiuiy," sez 1 "I've been took that
way myself frequent"
"You're a man of sin !" said the Elder.
Arter breakfast my little Shaker friends,
cum in again 10 clear away the dishes,
my pretty dears," sez I, "shall We gay
agini'
"Nay," they sed, and nay'd.
The Shakers axed me to go to their
meetin, as they was to hav sa,vices that
mornin, so put on clean billed rag and
went. The meetin house was as neat rs
pin. The floor was as white as chalk and
smooth as grass. The Shakers was all on
hand, in clean weskits and meal bags,
ranged on the floor like milingtery compa-
nies, the mails on one side of the room
and the females on tother. They COM
menst clappin their hands singin and dan
Gin. They danced kinder slow at first, but
as they got warmed up they shaved it
down pretty brisk, tell you. Elder Uri-
ah in partickler, exiberted right smart
chance of sprynessiu his legs, considerin
bis time of life, and as be cum a double
shuttle near whar l sot, I rewarded him
with an arprovin smile and sed: "Good
boy Go it my gay and festive cuss!'
"You're a man Of sin!" be sed, contin-
nerin his shuttle.
The Sperret, as they called it, then
moved short fat Shaker to say n few re-
marks. He sed they was Shakers and all
was ekal. They was the purest and seleck
est peple Cd earth. Other pePle was sim
full as they could be, but Shakers was all
right. Shakers was all goin kerslap 10 the
Promist Land, and nobody want goin TO
stand at the gale to bar 'em out, if they
did they'd git run ovea. s.....7-
The Shakers danced and sung agin, and
arter they was threw, one of 'em axed me
what thawt of it. Do
SEE l. "What duz it siggerfy y
"Whata" sez he. - -
"Why, this jumpin up and singin p
This long weskii bizniss, and this antimat-
rimony ideel" My frens, you air neat and
tidy. Your hands are fowin with milk
and honey. Your brooms is fine, and your
apple sass is honest. When man buys
kag of apple sass of you, he don't find a
great many shavins under few layers of
sass-a little game I'm sorry to say sum
of my New Englan ancestors used to prac-
tiss. Your garding seeds is fine, and if |
should sow 'em on the rock Of Gibralter
probly l should raise good mess of gar
ding sass. You air honist in your deslins.
You air quiet and don't distarb nobody.
For all this I givs you credit. But your
religion is small pertaters, must say
You NOPE away your lives here in single
retcbidness, and as you are all by your
selves nolhin ever conflicks with your pecoo-
Ter idees, excep, when Human Mater busts
out among you, as l understand she sum-
times do. 4 guv Uriab sly wink here,
which made the old feller squirm like a
speared Eel. You wear long faces, and
lead gloomy life indeed: No chiIdren's
prattIe is ever hearn around your harthstuns
you air in dreary fog all the time, and
you treat the jolly sunshine Of life as tho
it was thief drivin it from your doors BY
them weskits and meal bags, and pecooler
noshuns of yourn. The gals among you,
sum of which air as slick pieces Of caliker
as ever sot eyes on, air syin to put their
heds sgin weskits which kiver, honist man
ly harts, while your old heds fool yerselves
with the idee that they are fulillin their
mishun here, and air contented. Here you
air all pened up by yerselves, talkin about
tba Sin. of n world vou don't tnovv moth