Red Wing sentinel. [volume] (Red Wing, M.T. [i.e. Minn.]) 1855-1861, 1861-01-09
DIVERSIONS OF DOESTICKS.
NEW YEARS DAY IN NEW YOnl

NEW YEARS DAY IN NEW YORK
When I tell You that every night,
after I have got through my work, and
said good night to every one, I retire
to my cottage-which no one knows l
possess, in city of which TO one has
ever, until now. heard the name, stu
ated in land that nobody ever knew
Of before, you'll think I lie-but
don't. For hours, every day, live in
Chimera Cottage, in the city of No.
umbug, in the pleasant land Of Azey-
dlyktoayit. It is governed by Blunt
man, the Boshlers; and l and my true
friend, Tom Diconarry, are two of its
most humble citizens. In many-very
many respects the land and the people
differ from those known to us, and its
not at all unlikely that in these columns
you'll get frequent advices from the
city of No-umbug, and hear many of
the sayings of Blunt, the Boshlsrs,
King Of the pleasant land Of Azcy.
dlyktoavit.
My friend, Tom Diconarry, has re-
sided SO long in the city of No-umbug,
that he really has become possessed of
the notion that people ought to, and
do, say what they mean, and mean to
do AS they say. OF course, it was
necessary to disarusc his innocent
mind Of this monstrous absurdity, be-
fore he could reside in our everyday
country with any sort of safety. Among
other unaccountable fallacies with
which his head was crammed, was one
on tho subject of New Years calls.
You'll hardly believe it, but he posi-
lively thought that people make New
Years calls for the purpose of showing
goodwill and testifying their affection
for their friends.
Well, l couldn't permit him to re.
main in such state Of mental Egyp-
tian darkness as that; and 80, on New
Years day, made him attire him self
in gorgeous array, for the purpose of
accompanying me in my annual parade
for inspection by my female friends.
Tom said he didn't know anybody, and
actually offered that as 4 reason why
he shouldn't go to see anybody.
tom" said 1-hurrying him into a
corner before the rest of the fellows
should perceive and laugh at his tire.
mendous ignorancs-"in in New York.
you don't call to see people because
you like them, but because you want
to see what the women have got to
wear, and what they can give you to
eat and drink. You don't need tc
know the ladies-if you behave your
self, it's all ri ight--they'll think you're
Il customer OF their fathers, or friend
of their brothers, or th:t you're some
one they've met somewhere, somehow
sometime, and, anyhow, it's all right
On New Years day, in New York, a
fashionable suit of clothes is a univer
sal letter of introduction-a tasting
order on every wine.cellar in Fifth
Avenue and Madison Square. So, my
boy, 60 it."
We went it.
know some ladies myself, and
know lots of fellows who have sisters
to say nothing of lots of sisters who
have fellows, and some who haven't
more's the pity. So we resolved tc
call and see the ladies I knew and
was to introduce Tom--that sort Of
thing being permitted in New York
I've known a clerk in ribbon store
in which twelve 'young men" were
employed, gravely introduce the whole
procession of dozen to the daughte,
Of a millienairious Madison Squareite
on New Years day, when the whole
strength of his acquaintance with the
family lay in the fact, that he had sold
their best looking chambermaid a roll
of lutestring ribbon = week before.
Before that squad of twelve left that
fated mansion, they had whipped ou'
large ham and two turkeys; placed
two hundred picked oysters among
the things that were; had demolished
! cake and sandwiches enough to make
another small Egyptian pyramid, and
had each one filled himself to high
water mark with wine and coffee
which they drank mixed half.and half
We startcd--snow on the ground
air crisp, brisk and bracing; called tc
see Miss Smith, Miss Brown, Mis-.
Thompson, tho four Misses johnson
the several Misses Wiggnis, the doze1
or SO Misses jenkins, the brood o.
| Misses Wornor 4l,o N,o1 II ~: