The Wyandot pioneer. (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1853-1868, 1861-11-29
aNistellaa,eolls.
THE WIFE tanner.

was poor, but very handsome, when e
Squire Morton lnalr:ei her. and at his |
death, two years afterwards, she being +,
sole heir, put on the widows weeds, and
pocketed her deceased husbands gold at i
the same time. I
Madame Rumor said the poor old Nor
ton never enjoyed single hour after he
married her; but how should Madame
Rumor know OF one thing. however,
l can give my readers reliable informa
ton Mrs. Morton had not been wild
ow twelve months, before she received
with some pleasure very decided a.ten-
tions from DIR. Strahan.
Do you inquire who Dr.. Strahan was
Well, he studied medicine, and had the
title of NJ. D. conferred upon him, which
he took great pleasure in attaching to the
end OF his name with grand flourish.
But it is asserted that he never had a
half dozen patients in as many years.
He was a young man of prepossessing
appearance, a ready talker upon any sub
ject, and was, in fact, frstrate company
He played the flute and sang-was a
good dancer, and an excellent partner at
whist besides he had some literary rep
utation. He wrote poetry, and two col
umn sketches for the Weekly Leveler, and
last. though by no means least, he dressed
in good taste and in the height Of the
fashion. How be did it no one knew,
but then it was no ones business.
Bull must be allowed to contradict one
rumor that gained considerable preva-
ience, to the effect that he supported
himself by his literary labors an ordi-
nary newspaper scribbler could hardly
afford Strahan's wardrobe,
Old Squire Morton had been dead but
little over year, when DR.. Strahan, des-
pite all that gossipers could say, mar.
ried the widow and her fortune. The
fact was, be wanted Iich wife. AS for
her, she was anxious to leave her weeds
and go into society again, and she could
devise no reader means to accomplish
these purposes than by marrying. When
any enc spoke to the doctor of her being
shrew, he merely remarked that be
swould take pleasure in tanning shrew.
For three months they lived happily
together for it was in the height Of the
season, and betwixt Cape May, Saratoga,
and the White Mountains, they were
alone with each other scarce three hours
out of the twenty -four consequently it
was impossible for them to disagree
But the season was soon over and they
returned to their quiet home-the place
Of all Others TO study wife or husband
there is no unnatural excitement--no
fashionable Mrs A. to outdress, no prof
ligate Mr.. B. to outdo in squandering
honey, no one to see. to please, but the
"other half.''
After a season of long continued gay
ETY. there necessarily follows one of ex
treme dullness and when one is dull,
one is easily displeased. Now Mr.. and
Mrs Strahan were both of them remark
ably dull. and as a matter Of course both
preferred being pleased to attempting te
please, and consequently both were very
much displeased.
1t was their third day at home wher
their first quarrel commenced. How i
began neither could clearly tell. 1t i;
only known that Strahan expressed de
sire to dine on roast beef, upon which
: Mrs. S. said she abominated beef, and
r stated her preference to be roast turkey
and oyster sauce Strahan considered
1 turkey child's food--"be'J have bee
!. or nothing" She'd have turkey, ant
e thus began the war of Strahahs. On
e ordered the butcher not to have fowl, th
J. other gave strict injunctions not TO hav'
+ beef brought to the house between
r them they were both likely to starvs
they remained at home ; so the docto
n went to the village tavern and dined OIL
=, beef, and Mrs. S. visited some Of he
friends and partook of turkey.
III After dinner DR.. S. gave wine suppe
in the room which he dignifed by tn
name of ''s'udy.' sort of variety store
l. in which he kept his library, writing des
n and spittoon. Here also were two glas
cases: one OF which contained giant
e skeleton, hung on wires in the othe
1t was an Egyptian mummy. The wall
were hung with curiosities of all descrip
e tons; among them cane which gre,
p over Washington's grave, snuff be
l. from wood of the Charter oak, Chi
q from the United States frigate Constitu
&c lion, minerals, shells, and fossils of a
kinds, specimen ears of corn, enormou
sized fruits and vegetables, cases of drie
insects and jars OF pickeled reptiles
Stuffed birds were perched about tn