New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1861-02-16
GOVERNMENT OF ATTRACTION.

al
a knotty problem that seemed to stand III the
way of his political ASPIRATIONS by declaring HIM
self In favor of the Maine law, but opposed TO
- its execution" Our model CniOnsts and In
ION savers would seem to have taken hint from
the astute Ensign in their treatment Of the
founders of the new Cotton Republic.
We do not here propose to combat the idea OF
Government by Attraction-we only insist that
the Fire.Eaters shall not enjoy monopoly of ts
advantages. Let us all have share.
Prisoner at the bar" says Judge Goggles, in
his most imposing and awful manner, "you have
been convicted of picking i. Us pocket of a
wallet containing si1ty-odd dollars, beside vaua-
bic notes and papers. The crime is grand lar
ceny by statute; the penalty several years hard
labor in the State Prison. The proof is clear,
the ofenso is rank. What reason have you to
give why the sentence Of the law should not now be
passed on yOu
"Wby, please your Honor" says the culprit,
staggering at the idea of the judges jolly green
ness, 81 seocded last night about ten o'clock,
and resumed my individual sovereignty. l am
no longer q citizen of this State, nor of any
State, but am entirely on my own hook. II
should ever resume my former subordination to
the State whereof you are awell-deserving pillar,
I'll call and let you know"
"Ah indeed" rejons the chagrined and chap
fallen judicial functionary 81 was not aware Of
that circumstance. OF course, YOU will go where
you please" Then turning 10 the Courts right hand
man, he says sternly, "ilr. Sheriff your gross
carelessness and neglect of duty has cost US days
hard work for nothing Never bring another
culprt TO this bar without frat asccrtaining that
he has not seeded, and will not do 30, even
though the trial should 60 against him."
-"Mr. Keeper" says the foremost Of the
cOnyicts of Sing Sing, on rising from hearty
breakfast, and feeling himself in good condition
for travel, Il give you fair notice that the whole
six hundred Of us here present have seeded from
the State which We have thus far patronlzed
with our allegiance, and resumed our original
and independent sovereignty as rational beings.
As there ia no time now for quoting opposite
passages from the Social Contract, We simply
give you notice Of the material fact and warn
you and your underlings to stand out OF our
way"
"Of course responds the polite official, " if
you will have it 50, be it. Mcssrs. Guards!
be good enough to let these gentlemen pass-
they have seeded, YOU see, and will not remain
with US any longer"
-'Mr. Hardcase," rays the jailer to one OF
his boaiders ." am under the dsasreeable
necessity of reminding you that you are sent
enced to be hung at twelve O'Clock to-day and
it is now quarter past eleven. VIII You be
good enough to make any little arrangements yOu
may deem desirable, 50 that wc shall be ready
for business when the clock strikes "
Al hardly think it advisable is Mr. Hard
cases considcrate reply II cant say that l
feel an attraction for the galows this raw morn.
ing; and, since ] have got NIL the board and
lodging out of you that the law allows me,
think ! shall secedc in few miuu,cs and go
about my business"
Mr. H." remarks the iaicr, IN q tore of
mild vet keen rebukc, IL must say that your
conduct is not such as one gentleman has n right
to expect from another Have ! not always
treated you with the most sensitive regard for
your feelings Have you not lived Ike fight
Ing. cock since You first c0ndescended 10 honor
me with your company Has the word hemp
been once named by me in your presence
Have | ever, IN my most sportIyc moods, cracked
a joke with You about dancing on nothing
Have ] ever insinuated that most men prefer 70
60 to glory with their boots off! Yet here have
you allowed me 10 squandcr four shings of good
money on rope for which at the last moment
YOU deprive me of any use Nay, have invited
my very selectest friends to view the impressive
ceremony for which to-day was assigned, and
some Of them are already in the building, while
the rest are by this time on the way. i have
the neatest Of gallOwsirames in perfect readi.
ness; while the parson--for l wished TO DO every.
thing in the highest style of respectabty-has
left his books and his deyotions 10 speed your
parting with one Of his most unctuOUs prayers.
All this trouble and expense would have been
saved by timely notice of your intention thus
suddenly, unseasonably announced. Your con-
duet is very UnhandsOme, Mr.. H., and j must
say that ] have a right TO regard ii with indig-
nation"
TO all which, the cuprit deigns never q word of
reply, but, invested in his newy-resumcd panoply
of Individual Sovereignty walks cooly and with
dignity about his business.
AS yet, our eyes have not been gladdened
with any evidence that the Cotton Republicans
recognize any other sovereignty than that they
find it convenient 10 assert; but they will doubt
less improve in consistency if it be impossible
that they should grow in wisdom. If Louisiana,
Florida, and Texas are accorded the right to Sc
cede at will from the Union which bought them