The Cadiz Democratic sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1854-1864, 1861-02-20
! Artemus ward ON .l,e ..crlsis.''

sArtemus Ward on the Crisis"
q On returnin to my humsted in Baldinsyille
Injianny resuntly, my teller citterzens extend.
ed invite for me 10 nprate to EN- on the lkry-
SIS i excepted " ON lafst Toosday mite Ipear.
I'd bed a cfupturned faces. in the Red Skooi
House. spoke neerly as follers: rs sz8 8
!" Baldinsvillns Hearto4 as / hav nrlmerously
obsarved, 1 hav atstained from hayin any senti-
mants or principles, my polleftios, like my reli-
gion, bein Of a exceedm acconmodatin character.
But the fack can't be longerdisgised that kry.
sis is 'onto us, s. i feel it,s my duty to except
your invite for one consecutive mite only. 1
spose the infammertory indyidooals who assis-
ted in producing this krysis know what good
she will do, but amt shamed to state thatI
don't scarcely. But the Krysis rs hear. She's
been hear for several weeks, &c goodness nose
how long she'hstay But 'venter to assert
that she's ripping things She's knokt trade
into coekt up hat and chaned anyot my liyin
wild Beats Allow me to .heardygress & stait
my Beests at present is as harmless as the new p
born Babe. Ladys & Gentlemen needn't hav
no fears on that pint To resoom.- Altho'
can't exackly see what good this Kryss can do,
can vary quick say what the original cawz Of
her is. The origernatca is our Afrikan Bro
ther. was into Barnim's Moozeum down in
New York the other day g. saw this ssexsentric
Ethiopian, The What Is It, Sez j, g"Mister
What Is 1t, you folks are raisin thunder with
this crate country. You're gettin to be ruther
more numers than interestin.g 1t is a pity you
Icoodent 90 arfsnmwheres by yourselves, & be
nashun Of What Is It's, tho if you excoose me,
1 shooden't care about MARVIN among you. No
Edowt you're exceedin charmin to hum, but Your
stile OF luvliness isn't adopted to- this cold CHI
nit fIe larfed into my lace, which rather riled
me, as had binperieekly vrtooas and respec-
table IN my obsergashuns.i So sez /, turnin a
leetle red in the face spcct, ''Do you have the
onblushing iu,poodentsto say you folks haven't
raised big mess of thunder in this brite land,
Mister What Is Tt?" He larfed agin, wusser
nor be4, whareupon | up and seq, eco home
Sir, to Ahiky's burnin shores q talk allthe o.
ther What Is It's aion with you, Don't think
we can't SPAR your interestin picters. Yoa
What Is It's air on the pint of smashin up the
gratest COMMENT ever erected by man, u you
actooally hav the owdossity to larf about it. Go
home, you low cuss!''e5s1 @ ,gE eis @s.y s;a"
| Twas sworktup to high pitch & proceeded
to Restorator& cooled orf with some little
fishes blsd in ile--Ib'bleeve they call 'ein sar-
deems. &d4W sA}aa .aF@ 5aa F@2 "a
Feller Sitterzens, the Afiikan may be Oar
Brother, Sevral hily respectyble gentlemen, and
sum talentid female tellu so, q for arguments
sake might be inlooced to grantit, tho don't
b'ieve it myself But the Airillan isn't our Sis
ter 81 our wife &our uncle. He isn't several OF
our brothers u all our itaSt wife's relashuns. -
He isn't our grandfather, and our Aunt in the
country Scacely, &c yit nurneris pursons would
have us think So It's troo he runs Congress &c
sevrsl other public grosserys, but then he ain't
everybody, & everybody else likewise. 4 Notiss
to bizness man of Vanity Fair: Extry charg
fur this last remark. It's goak.--A. W.T. &s3
9 But we've got the Afrkan, or rathef he's got
us, & now what air we going to do about il.
He's offal noosance. ,sPraps he was creatid
for. some wise purpuss, like the measles and
New England rum, but it's nifty hard to see it.
Az any rate he's no good here, is stated to
Mister What IsIt, it's pity he coedent go orl
Isumwhares by ihisseB wbar he Good ware red
I,weskits and speckled necktie q gratteffy his
aimbishun in varis interestin ways, without
having aeternat fdss kicktup about him al@s @
/ Praps Pm bearing down to hard upon Guffys
Cum to think on it, ~ am. He swooden't be
sich Internal noesance if white people would
let him alone He mite indeed be interestin.
And now i think oft, why can't thewhite peo
pie let him alone? What's the good ofcontia-
herly stirring him up with a ten foot otspole?--
He isn't tile sweetest kind of periootaery when
/ in natral stait. a4 tH
aiFeller- -sitteFsens the Union, is in danger
The black devil disunion is truly here starin us
squarely IN the face. aWemust drive him back.
Shall we make I'd Mexico Of ourselves n Shall
we sell our birthrite for mess or potash?--
Shall one brother pat the knife TO the throat oi
N
with each others blood? Shall the star spang.
led banner be cut up into dishcloths9 Standin
here iii ttis here slooilhouse, upon Iny natis
shore 30 tospeelc. 3 answerA--N ary! fgsSsghs @
Il Oh you felIers who are raIsin this row 81 wht
in the lust place started it. Pm 'shamed Of You
/ The Snowman blushes for yod, from his boots
| to the atophost haF upon his venerable he'd Tvs
/ | say the South don't sesech | say To- The
gallant people of that sunny land, jus lock uT
la few hundred OF them tearin u foarin feiler.
ofyourn in sum strong boxes. and send their
lover to Mexko And wepeople up North here
L will consine ekal number Of our a,ldal sbrauec
"Trip snorters 70 the same lokailerty g. THAR le
EN- ffte itout among themselves. sNoconse
kents, notthe slitist, which rlieks. Why
eDst the people who got up this fite do tht
ftia Get these onsry critters cut usthe way
s. the sensible people ofthe North q South, car
i fix the matter up very easy. And when iii
fixt let both soceshans resolve 10 mind their
own biznss. @5 etssa5 81 La@aa2 9as ~ ,aa89a
-Fellef Sitterzens, 4 am in the Sheer a. YeHei
leaf shall peg soat I OF these dase. Bu
wbiie4 stop .hereI shal stay in the Union. =
Iknow not what the Superyizsrsaof Baldins
Vile may conclude TO do, but for one, 4 shall
stand by the Stars & Stripes Under no cir
cnu eta ncac ,uhotcomavar will easa Ql,S q Tat
ever 'staitih the Union sesesh, N& fet Palmettel
flags foatt thicker nor shirts on Square Baxter''
close line, still Will stick to the good cid flag
The country may go The. devil but a won'tl4
And next summer when Iestaft out on MY
cainpane with my show, wharever Lpitch my
l,ttle tent, you shall see floating proud ly from