Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1861-05-30

pastured upon a thousand hills, more
than thousand years ago. If there be
one thing dislike more than another,
it is tough beefstcak.'
you ordered it yourself from the mar
ket, so you needn't find fault with me
on account of it. knew it was tough
the moment looked at it,
Then why didn't you send it back?
| inquired.
Because it was your selection. sup
posed you wanted tough one; besides
if had returned it, you would have
found fault with me for doing So
We'll, | cant cat it. 'hat's certain |
said, so it had bctt r be taken off of the
table. shan't throw any more money
away on beefsteaks.
| 'Oh, it will answer for hash said my
economical wife, and you can have it
for dinner
Hash = I exclaimed. If there be
one thing / dislike more than another,
it is hash. Hash is only fit for children
and old people without teeth, Besides.
it is a populf dish at boarding-scho
and boarding houses, and when l was a
boy, and afterward while a bachelor l
ate my snare of it, and n not going to
cat any more. No, we will have q tur-
key for dinner
very we'll, said my spouse, a tur-
key let it be. AAall 1 see to getting
one?'
'Itlink not answered. The fact
is, that all the turkies you select turn
out to be like the celebrated one OF
which Job was the owner-poor and
tough. No, ri buy the turkey, and
you ian cook it,.
Very we'll, said the imperturable
lady.
But how will you have it cooked 2
oh, any way; suit yourself, l answe-
Then think will roast it, she re-
Piled,
Roast it" / exclaimed. That is
st like you. Now, you know if there
one thing ] dislike more than anoth-
u 10 W IdNc tuIhCJ IouotCu'
Very we'll, then said the accommo-
ting woman Il will boil it,
Boil it" said, aghast' Boil soup,
il lamb chops. boil cherries, if you
e, but never, for me boil a turkey
Pray. then, how will you have it
,ked ? Only tell me and it shall be
Ie.'
Why -why-well-frcasee. it of
lrse.' answered triumphantly.
Very well, said the lady, looking,
yever, as if it were not very we'll.
Why can't you say something else
ides very well p asked. What a
voking woman you are to be sure
Not halt as provoking as you arc.
replied,
Now then you wish TO make me an
L suppose but you cant do it,, !
|. I have put up with everything
through breakfast, and am not 60
to be provoked just as | am finish
lam sure do not wish to provoke
> my wife said in most innocent
aggrieved manner.
}ut you most certainly do provoke
; | replied
hen am sorry for it, she answer
in softcncd tone, for such was n ot
intention.
looked across the table at my wife;
nthins like tear rolled down her
X
oodncss ! whispered to myself, l
made my wife weep. What "a
ia brute am.
hen speaking aloud, / exclaimed:
)arlingr
ELL was her calm reply.
You know, continued, that if
: be one thing dislike more than
lcr, it is tear
le answered, simply with a sad
vcethcart, l said.
ell?
,ok the turkey any way you please.
ie shook her head.
left my seat, having finished my
kfast, went to her side, and smoo.
her pale, wan cheek with my hand
d it, and said:
,rgive me, dear, this time.
lie smiled obviously. as if this time
only one out of the 'seventy-times
\ which she would be called on t,
I'VE during our matrimonial career
nevertheless, the pressure of hel
which I had taken. assured mt
noocn was made