White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1861-05-23
LEGISLATIVE SKETCHES.
JOSIAH MILLER,

Dc ucINCu dC sadC VI VIC AsAiiSs " A'~..S
fsld." He was an officer in the war Of 1872,
and bore distinguished part in the battle OF
Lundy's Lane. His memorable words upon
that occasion, "I'll try," are destined to live
forever. It was from these words that the ex-
preston arose, "I1l never forget the Miller. !"
But Mr. Miller's great forte is joking. In this
line he has world wide celebrity, and is known
BY the familiar name Of "Joe Miller" Some
eighteen years since, he undertook the stupen-
dous task of bringing the world to an end.
Some persons contend that he would have &C.
eomplished it, had not the great comet Of that
year disarranged some Of his celestial triggers;
while others asservate that it was only one of
his grand jokes. Be that as it may. the failure
of the scheme ruined him financially, and from
that time he has devoted himself to politics.
His father was the inventor of mills for grind
ing grain. This is the reason why the person
who superintends the grinding is called "Mil-
ler." Senator Miller has singular monoma-
mia for robbing bee hives-and so widely exten-
ded is his notoriety for this, that the moth
which destroys the bees is by most people call
ed Miller.
CHARLES ROBINSON.
Observing Governor Robinson enter the Hall
of the House, reminded US that be is properly
entitled to 9 place in our picture gallery. Gov.
Robinson was born in New England. His par
ents having died about year before his birth,
be was early thrown upon his own resources.
He apprenticed himself to the cod fishing bust
ness, and picked up an education on rainy days
and between times. Possessing great aptitude
in ventriloquism and sleight of hand perform
ances, and initiating all phases of Yankee cha
racter, he abandoned the cod fish business, Or
ganizeJ company, and travelled through the
country giving exhibitions. In this capacity,
he was universally known and welcomed as
"Yankee Robinson" After travelling over
the United States, he determined to visit South
America and the Sandwich Islands. He accor-
dingly embarked with his company on board
vessel commanded by Alexander Selkirk, and
set sail; bat the ship was wrecked, and every
person on board lost except himself. He swan
for three days and nights, without any prospect
Of rescue, when he at length drifted upon q
small, uninhabited island. He ascertained.
from Dutch Almanac which he happened to
have in his pocket, that this was the island of
Don Juan Fernandez. Here he was, cut off
from every human being, without q cent of
money. But, upon vending his way up the
bank, what was his astonisnment and delight at
finding quarter of a dollar! He felt that this
would relieve his present necessities, and he
trusted to his ingenuity to get along afterwards.
He found few grains of oats in his pocket,
which he planted, and succeeded in obtaining q
fine crop. There were also a few crumbs of
cheese in the pocket, which he threw on the
ground, and was astonished, few months af-
terwards, to see crop of goats spring up. He
taught the goats to dance, in which pastime he
joined them, whistling some lively tune for
music. A correct representation of this is Civ
en- in Webster's old Elementary Reader. One
day he was surprised by q visit from stranger,
who registered his name as Mr.. Friday. Rob-
inson liked his style, and invited him to stay.
Mr.. Friday acceded to the proposition; where
upon Robinson surveyed off the island, declared
himself monarch of it all, with the title of
Robinson Crusoe," and had Friday for his
subject. The latter was so faithful, that his
master gave him the name of "Good Friday"
The reign was long and prosperous; but at
length Chinese junk, on its way to Californis,
was driven on the island. Robinson was i'm.
medistely seized with longing to see the
world once more; and accordingly he and Fri
day embarked for California, where they arriv-
ed safely. They then started for Kansas, and
were attacked and scalped by the Indians on
the Plains. Robinson recovered, minus the
hair on the top Of his head, and reached the
settlements. He grieved for the loss of Fri.
day; and, in order to tighten his sorrow in a
small degree, he now keeps several "men Fri
day" The Indians destroyed all his valuable
journals, charts, records, etc., which he had
keptzdnipg bis island residence, and one Of
our Territorial Legislatures authorized the is
suing Of Bonds, to compensate him for the loss;
but some envious and miserly politicians pro-
nounce it . Swindle, and keep up an everlast-
ing fuss over it. Il is feared that the only al
tentative left the Governor, will be to get ship
wrecked again, and get up new set Of docu.
ments.
s.N. WOOD.
One Of the most working members Of the Se-
nate, is the Senator from Chase, s. N. Wood.
He is always busy and making noise-gene-
| rally picking flaws in what others are trying to
accomplish. Whenever . measure passes the
Senate, upon which Wood has not spoken, or
with which he has not found some fault, the
President draws black mark on the wall be-
hind his chair, and special record is made of
the circumstance on the Journals. There is
but one mark on the wall, and but ore special
record on the Jounals-and even that 10 &C.
comranied with the laconic explanatory note,
Absent" An effort is making to amend the
Constitution BY inserting . provision that no
bill shall become law until Sam. Wood has
spoken upon it, or fled his objections This
penchant for making fuss, was characteris
tic Of Wood from the beginning of his life, COM
mencing in the cradle. In those times, when.
ever . child became boisterous or unruly, it
was an invariable practice to compare him to
the "babe Of the Woods" and q nursery story
was gotten up on the strength of it. Mr. Wood
vas once Governor Of Ohio, and declined re-
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