Holmes County farmer. [volume] (Millersburg, Ohio) 1857-1926, 1861-03-28
COMMUNICATIONS.
Hopkinsville Varmount.

1opHlnsyllle V farmount.
MISTER FARMER
want tu no sumthn and l noed yeou cud teld
me. spose yeou don't no who is, and l spose
yeou don't take the papers way down there ifyeou
did yeoud noed me, my name is Zedekier Hop
hins, of ofHopkinsvie, Yarmouth. calkelate is
related to ole Ethan Allen coz he lvd on top Of
the Green Mountains and dad livd on the bottum
A membur of Yarmouth legislator and l is cold
the Honorable Zedekier Hopkins; and not Zed as
they use ter did.
Meow | rite tn yeou COZ seend sum of yeour
pesky papers here III Yarmouth, and heow they
cumbd here dun no cept sum nasty ole DINNER
crat feched 'em along travellin this way. l hate
the nasty dimmercrat papers like all git eout but
l was kinder glad when Iseend yeours, COZ seend
a letter in it from Jonathan Quillicum Smith.
kinder wandered if it warnt the same Jonathan
that l used tu 60 tu skeule with. l noed yeou
cud tell who he war coz he went tu skeule tn yeou
on Yaller erik. Mebbe it int him for all, but if
it be deont it beat all mater heou he shud go tu
skeue tn yeoul But the way he cut up with the
gal think its him. Ole Smith tarnal ole dim
mercrat had boy cold Jonathan Quillicum Smith
and lie told yeou abeout him and heow he cumbd
tu run away. We alters cold him Donty, an all
fired critter as ever yeou did see in all yer born
days.
Wall lie teld yeou heow it was. Ole Smith and
his wife Hammer belonged tu church and wur
nifty strict. So wun mornin Suky Smart cumed
over tn ole Smiths fur fire, meow Suky was
tarn nj pl
she was, and she was a darter of ole Bob Smarts
who lived jist in the ege of punkin holler, and as
was tellin, Hammer herend noise in the kitchen
like sumbody smutherin and she opened the door
and there, sure enuff, Donty had Suky rite reound
her neck chokin and kissn and kssn and chokin
til she was red as fire. Hammer she hollerd, "Dad,
dad! o marcy on us, whots the world cummin tn;
what do you think, orfu orful Donty will cum
tu sum bad end, he will cum tn the gallus meow
he will" Ole Smith was readin nasty dimme-
crat paper, looks up, pulls off his specks, "Why
Hammer, whats the matter meow, is nobody killedT'
80 dad, dad" sez she, "what du yeou think,
seend Donty hav Suky rite reound her neck and
was kssn on her. and kissin on her, and fust she
made a kinder fuss abeout it, and then she held
st as still, and as still. o Lord marcy what will
cum on US, the wicked crtter," and then she cut
away at Suky. Suky said IL cudent help it, Donty
was chokin on me and jst held still COZ l noed
he d let go arter while coz he alters did," Ole
Smith was sum, and he bringed deown his foot rite
on tn the fore cur-thump; not like ole Abes inter
sumthn soft, sez he, "Donty." "What," sez
! nj lba
"No isn't" sez Donty. | tell yeou Donty warnt
afraid ur nothin, Ole Smith sez, "Donty yeou
go and cut good stick and deont yeou cum back
withut it and lie larn yeou heow tn behave when a
gal Gums arter fire." Donty seq, "Dad l noes
meow" "Begonc with you," sez ole Smith. 81
WILL" sez Donty. And away he went sure enuiI
and hes never been heernd Nv ever since, cept
heernd ov him in yeour paper. Meow du let us
meow if your Donty is the same Donty who use
tu live in the ege of Hopkinsyille. Since Donty
has turned over on tu our side ole Smith weon
care nuthn for him. He is an orful dimmecrat
he hates nggers like pisen but if he is our Donty
l say go it Donty on the loud, gin it tn 'em, then
tarnel dimmecrats ruined the nation and if lie
alone wood ruin all creation. Hurra for Ole Abe
dunno, cumbd down Iguess, not fight guess, lie
the tarnal nigger drivers have it all er own way
guess. Donty, whether yeour Yaller erik or Hop
kinsville, jst tell Ole Abe tu take that foot h
put deown eout ov that soft stuff an put it on
rok like man. Yeou can du sumthin with MIN
kneow yeoure sum by yeour letters. I'm feer
the nation is gone tu smashes, what du you sa
Mister Farmer?
Meow plese tu let the Honorable Zedebie
Hopkins of Hopkinsvi lie Varmount meow sumthi
abeout Jonathan Quillicum Smith.
And oblige the
HON. ZEDEKIER HOPKINS.
M MARRIED-