Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1861-10-05

uoor anu iounu IhyseiI right among the
women. Oh, my leghorn = cried ONE
My dear, darling winter velvet T. cried
another, and they pitched in-they pulled
me this way and that, boxed my ears; and
one bright eyed little piece, SaI--,her
name was--put her arms around my neck
and kissed me right on my lips. Human
nature could mt stand that, and l gave her
as good as she SENT 1t was the first time
that L ever got taste, and it was power
ful good. believe l could have kissed
that gal from Julias Cesar to the 4th of
July.
Jack, said she, we are sorry to dis,
turb you, but won't you see me home p
Yes, said 1, will did do it and had an
other smack at the gate, too. After that
we took kinder turtle-doving after each
other, both of US signing like barrel of
new cider when we were away from each
other 'l'was at the close of glorious
summer day-the sun was setting behind
distant hogpen-thc chickens were going
to roost ; the bullfrogs were commencing
to sing their evening songs; the pollywogs
in their native mudpuddlcs were preparing
for the shades of night, and Sal and my
self sat upon an antiquated backlog listen
ing to the music of nature, such as tree
toads, ROSTERS and grunting pigs, and now
and then the mellow music of distant
jackass was waited to our ears by the gen.
tie zephyrs that sighed among the mullen
stalks, and came laden with the delicious
oder of hen roosts and pig styes the last
lingering rays Of the setting sun glancing
from the brass buttons of a soil tary horse
man shown through knot hole in the
hog pen, full in Sails face, dying her hair
with an orange peel hue, and showing off
my thread. bare coat to bad advantage /;
one of my arms was around SAILS waist,
hand on the small of her back. She was
toying with my auburn locks of jet black
hue ; she was almost gone and was ditto.
She looked like grass hopper dying with
the hickups, and l felt like mud turtle
choked with cod fish ball.
SAL, says l, in voice musical as the
notes of dying swan, will you have me ??
She turned her eyes heavenward, clasped
me by the hand, had an attack of the
heaves and blind staggers, and with sigh
that drew her shoe strings clear out then,
and squatted in my lap; she corkscrewcd
and l curfummuxed and rolled in it.
hugged her until | broke my suspendcrs,
and her breath smclt of onions she had
eat the week before. Well to make long
story short she set the day, we practised
for four weeks every night how we would
walk into the room to get married, till we
got so we could walk as graceful as a cou-
pie Of Muscovic ducks.
The night, the company, and the minis.
ter came; the signal was given, and arm
in arm through the crowded hall. We
were just entering the parlor door, when
down L went kerslap on the oil cloth, pull
ing Sal after me. Some cuss had dropped
banana skin on the floor, and foored me.
split an awful hole in my cassimers right
under my dress coat tail. 1t was too late
to back out, so clapping my hand over it
we marched in and were spliced, and ia.
king seat l watched the kissing the bride
operation. My groomsman was tight ,and
ne kissed her until l jumped up to take
slice, when, oh, horror! little six year
I'D imp had crawled behind me, and pull
ID my shirt through hole in my pants,
lad pinned it to the chair, and in jumping
Up | displayed to the admiring gaze of the
lstonished multitude, triae more white
muslin than was finally put to bed, and |
here all my troubles ended.