Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1861-06-21
Wisfau Painted to the Life

draws the following portrait of Senator
Wigfall. who, with jeff Davis and Toombs
has just taken up quarters in Richmond
Wigfall is in every way notable anc
noteworthy person. He is little, squatty
man, with hair all over his face. Yol
have seen plump English bull pup, bal
grown. When such a pup growls, yor
may easily imagine the noble Wigfall
full Of sound aud fury" l will not ado
signitying nothing" Wigiall is full O
meaning, inexplicable meaning. to Judge
by the very small portion which has es
capped him. He belongs to that mysterious,
crusading blocd, which boils within So
fiercely, that nothing but froth ever comes
out. Maybe you are not aware that he
shot Brooks (Mr. Summers assailant) in a
duel some twenty years ago. And thus
far he has his claims to regard He is
moreover man of rare accomplishments.
is efficient as champion against the des-
perate tiger King Faro. and can drink
himself blind drunk as quickly as any man.
Moreover, Nigfall is an expert broad swords
man, keen pistol shot, and terrible
swearer ! All, but you should hear him
swear Such variety Of oaths-oaths
sentimental. oaths reverential, aths COM
mon, oaths proper, oat!.s, in short. mascu-
line, feminine and neuter, Of all sizes ard
shapes and for every emergency, real or
imaginary. You straight laced Quakers
can't altogether appreciate the full force,
effect, service, prestige of full, round
unvarnisGed oath. With the chiyalry it is
staple commodity Of most excellent
quality With cur ancient cavaliers, you
remember, 1t was weapon Of wonderful
prowess. 1t has not degenerated. From
by my halidom - to 3 damn your eyes !"
the expletive has gained strength, versa
tllity, melody Of rythnp, music of d,ction.
and force of character Wigfall could IL
lustrate the entire science, and philosoph-
ically treat it, if he chose, with examples,
elucidations. and limitations
Wigfall, believe me, is E coward. Tie is
what might fly be d nominated poeti-
cal bully. Last fall. out III Texas, be got
into dreadful row with A, friend Of
his. Straigttway he sent hlm note, to-
wit: Compliments of Wigfall to A.,
and desires to know if he will accompany
him out of the limits of tie state.'
To which \. replies instanter: As
compliments to Wigfall. begs to assure
h m that h (W;g all) is ID coward
to tulhl any such engagement, if entered
into.
Several days elapse A hears nothing
Of Wigfall. At length one rainy afternoon
as he was sitting al lie in his room writing,
gentle rap came upon the door-a rap
as soft as the tap of dove Come in !''
The door slowly opened and there stood
Nig;all! "Nell, A" said he mcekly.
'the hon and the lamb shall meet. you
know" "D-n you, retortcd A (which
is the lion and which is the lamb here p
Nigiall studied a moment; heavenly
siuiie mounted his usually ruby counte-
nance magnauiinity, amiability and plant
eondescension bcamed ont of every pimrlc
lie paused-but for moment, and replied
well, A, old fellow, you shall be
lion, and I'll be lamb y
Quuth 4, thereupon, "Sit down then,
and take a little of that whisky, and quit
making d jack Of yourself
On my honor, record but the simple
truth of history, when complete my story,
by assuring you that before leaving the
rvom, Wigcali had ottainid temporary
loan (not yet liqaidated, )of $500
The thing called " chivalry is a queer
jade. l know Of no more tilting, lifting,
flirting, delusive substance. 1t is a good
deal like the toast of Wigfall himself, in
vincible in peace, invincible in war. The
chevaliers wear long lair, like Samson Of
old, and Roger Pryor. They swear. too,
like forty-seven pirates, and drink whisky
worse than a Camanchc They like a
cocktail better than cockadc, but do not
object to the latter, if it is tipped with
ermne and turned up with gold lace
They ike to he patt,d upon the back,
cheered and encouraged and don't object
to puff we'll worded ii the newspapers.
Chivalry is like wasp, biggest when in
the egg. Ancient chivalry was marked
for ardor, modern chivalry for adroitness; :;
the heroes OF the crusades exhibited much
boldncss and little discretion in getting
into a fight; the modern heroes Illustrate
the inverse rule, and nnch guided by one
guardian principle - how to dodge bullet. s"
Robin Hood was an ancient member Of the
olden chivalry; Wigfall and Pryor Of the
modern.