New Orleans daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1851-1866, 1861-01-02
artenras Nassl an visit 70 Abe Lincoln.
From vanity Bais. ]

But the bI5InI59. laF more re-
+ sbecul bisiniss nor what polertcs is. wouldn't
give gents to be a Congreaser. The Wuss insult
ever received when sertin citizens Of Baldins
vile axed me to run for the Legislator Sez ]:
6 Ny friends, dostest think I'd stoop to be that
there2n They turned as white as sheet
spoke in the most orfullest tones, d they knoWd
wasn't to be triaed with. They sluncked ont OF
site to onct.
There4. hevin no politics, + made bold to visit
Old Abe at his humstd in Springfield. 1 found the
old feer in his Tarlsr, surrounded BY q perfeck
swarm Of orifce seekers. Known he bad been
captfng Of a aatboas on the roaring tlississippy,
thought I'd address him in sailor lingo, 70 sez !,
shiver my stmburs, my Rartyif IThis s genuine
) mariner Iandwidge. I know, beeawz I've seen
J sailor plays acted out by them New York theater
felIers.1 Old Abe 1ookt up quite cross and 50
'send in yer petshun BY 6 by can't possibly
: look at now, Indeed ! cant iss ohposslale'
"Mr. Linken, what do you spsctI air2n sed /.
can orifce seeker, to be sure, said he.
!" Wall, SIR sed ], !. yous never more mistaken
no circumstances. I'm a. Ward Wax fggers Is
my profeshun. I'm the father of twins, and they
look Ike ms5sas qf nsns. cum f. pay =
states so wants q lee e's ns, "a sss paa.e ao
moi, say 80, 4 TIA orf like a iug handle.t .tS
" "Mr. Ward, sit down. am glad 10 SEE -ou.
Repaae III Abraharn,s Bhssarn p ed ana u tfs
'rlhce seekess his idee being to get OFF COAX at
Wal, !, I, "ef att you feerg reposs IL tbat
there Buzzum there'll be NIFTY poor nuaain for
some you Thgrsupon U oid Abe hutoaed his
Is Just n this pint Of the conversation another
q warm Of 81, 'fce seekers arove lG cam nIen inta
The paror i. IN wanted post orifces, sum waited
enIT. ,ctorshipaN fum wanted furrin missions ana
iii wa uted snryth n thought Old Abe wouId 20
esszy. He bagyrt more than time to shake hands
wltE 1ern before a otaer a r44Femenjis crowd cum
poTs onto the pren oTad 9is VIII aRa doagyard
all cian,eruas foy an In mejit interview with gld
Abe. One man from OFh y !siio had seven inches
and addrsss ny u tea a. hayrfe Fa8er IF III
West!n Thinks you wants az orifica putty bad.
An9 p9 hi iasa With 'ia sdss eaas s a 5sa ngss
Pride Of the Boundliss yFess sT
sez :. Square, You wouldn't tai e :. Small post
,of offs if you could getit, would yoa, : 3 s.t,
ssRhsresa putty big crop Of pasrits 1nas ~ aeassn
amt there squares' seq T. when anoths \ crowd Of
offs gerea IN me IN s house door aaa. has
crowd cum / told ZEN not TO go away for want o4 v
room, As the hog pen Vas yet empty One natTat s
from small town in ,s Wshf on tp Ehe fe
parler Where 0d Abe wss esips, ERIN I'd keep the
hungry pack Of offs seekers from eaaSflfH nlnI ap
alive without the benefit of clergy . AZ lals NJ s
reached the fire place he junpt aP. va soss a
out of his eyes, and yelled busit rnaRsssSli ehg
pintment at the SpunEylle post offs tiII you 81 ss
read my papers. All the respectful men id town
is signers to that there doekYment n n
Good Cody cried old Abe, y they cum upon
me from the skze-down Y 4, the ehmaeys and from
them words out Of his delikit month before two fas
oice.seekers from Wisconsin, in eIldegerin to crawl
atween his legs for the purpose Of applyin for the
tollgateship at Mlwawky, upset the President
eleek, and he would hev gone sprawlin into the
fire if l hadn't caught him in these arms. But 4
| hadn't more'n stood him up strate, fore another
strikn me yilently agn the inards and prosSratin
my Vouptoons form onto the floor Mr.. Linkin, Y
shoutid the infatooated being, my papers signed
by every clergyman in cur town, and likewise the
skoomaster "
sez /, ttyeu egreiis ass, gttin up and brushin
the dust from my eyes. "rll sign your papers with
keerfui how you make my bread basket depotin
the futur. How do youlike that air perfumeFy r.
sez shuving my fist under his nose, theIn'a NE
kind of papers I'll Civ you Them's the papers
you wantf'
Butt workt hard for the ticket; I toiled mite 8
day. The patrit should be rewarded.
avirtoo,'' sed I, holding the infatooated man by
the shirt coar, "virtoo, sir, is its own reward.
Look at metz He did look at me- and qualed bed
my gaze. The fact isl continued, lookn 81
round upon the hungry crowd, & there is scarcely
offs for every lie lamp carrd round during this
campane. I wish thare was. | wish thare was
fnrrin missions to be filed on varis lonely islans
where eppydemcs rage necessarily, and il was in
Old AbG's place, I'D serd every mothers son to
them. What air you here for?5 eontinnered,
warmth up considerable, aoant you give Abe O
mnnits peace? Go home, you miserable man, go
| home & till the sile Go to peddlin tfnWare; go to
chopin wood go to bilin sope stuff sassngers
black boots; git clerkship on sum respectable
manure cart; go round as origenal Swiss bell ring
| ers; beeum ORIGINAL and only Cambel Minstrels;
go to lecurn at fifty dollers mite; imhark in the
F3anut bsiniss write for the Ledger saw off
tour legs and go round gtvin concerts, with tuchin
appeal to Charitable publiciz printed on your
lScome round here drivin Old Abe crazy by your
olraius cuttings up Go home. Stand not upon
tho order of goin but go to onct !''
s!lf in five minitS from this tfme,'' sez pullin
NJ nj dollar luntn md
brandshn it before their eyes, . Ef in five minits
from this time single one Of You remains on these
here premises, I'll 60 out to my cage near by, and
let my Boy Constructor loose s. it he gifts amung
you, you'll think Old Soferno has cum again and
no mistake!h You ought to hev seen them scamp
or, Mr.. Fair. Theyrun OFF as tho Satan hisself was
arter them with red hot len prunged pitchfork-
In five minits the premises was clear,
!" How kin ! eyer M repay you Mr. Ward, fqr.your
warmly by the hand. How kinl ever repay you,
sr?'
By gvin the whole country good sound ad-
ministration.. By poerin lie upon the troubled
waters, North and South! By personin patriotic,
firm and Just course and thenif any State wants to
secede, let 'em sescsh!n
How bout my Cabnt Ministre, Wardsn sed
| Abe.
| "Fill it up with showmen showmen is devoid
| of politics. They haint got darn principle
They know how to cater to the pubic. They
/ know what the public wants, North aud South.
showmen, sir, is honest men. Eft you doubt their
literary ability, look at their posters, and see small
bills! Ef you want Cabinit as is Gabinit fill it
4 up with showmen, but DON'T call on me- The moral
4 Waxlgger perfeshnn mustn't be permitted to go
/ down while there's drop of blood in these Vaina.
A. Lnkin, l wish you Welt Ell Powers OF WAL
outt was 20 pick out a model fora beautiful man,
scarcely think they'd scup you: but ef you do the
fair thing by your country, youll make as putty an
angel as any of us, or any other Rlan! A. Linkin,
use the talents which nature has put into you ju-
dshusy and firmly, end all will be WELL A. Lin
| kin, adoo.n He shook me cordyully by the hand;
we exchanged pictures, so We could gaze upon
each others liniments when far away from one
anotheF--he at the heum OF the ship of State, and
at the helum OF the show bizuiss-aamittanee
only 10 cents. ARrEsfus WARD.
A milk peddler, finding that his business was not
just what it should be, resolved to tack about and
sell nsat in8tead of milk and water, as he had for
meriy done, and thus test the soundness of the old
maxim about the policy of honesty. A day or two
after he had effected the aforesaid change, he was
told by enc of his customers matronly lady Of
i some experience in life, that he need bring no
more milk to her. In great surprise he asked her
Il the reason why. e Because said she, 'the arGi-
rnn snld me Yesterdny the strangest stnffl