Pomeroy weekly telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy, Meigs County, Ohio) 1860-1866, 1860-01-17
6ltit and 6alisdo,lr.

HG The Empress Of the French is
surrounded with Paris-ites. isslE a.
B@ Upon the marriage of Miss
Wheat, an editor hoped that her path
might be tioaoery. @ e8
That's part of the sinking fund, /"
as chap said, when a box of money
went to the bottom Of the river.
pDA a gentleman asked negro if he
would not have pinch of snuff. "No, y
rspiisd the darkey, respectfully, "me tank
you-Pomps nose not hungry.
16rScott says that severy man that
lives has his lights and shades. 49,
We are not certain about shades, but
We presume there is no liver without
lights.
sG-T The following is good advice to
persons visiting offices and other business
places: Shut the door, and when you
are done talking, serve your mouth in
theis same way. 5s. .
a PosER.-aIt is not proper for you
to play school to-day, dear, for it is Sun
day, - : !
II know it, mother. but it's Sunday
School I'm playing" .s.
B6rA lady was astonished in. Missis-
, sippi, the other day. AT leastwe judge
SO from the fact that John A. Surprise
was married to Sallie A. Stock. They
win probably have little surprise oc-
easionally to keep up the Stock.
p@. The following is the only trace we
have left. of the Parnasion fight of a
young gentleman in the country, who
was evidently in a very bad way. Verse
4: Sss IS .ss-4 IS
and We both feit considsrably aoapiussed;
We was both happy 'noHgh to go insane,
.ss and We sat there for short time aud bussed!"
B@- Helper has sent a. splendidly
bound copy of the unabridged edition
of his sImpending Crisis" to Missouri
Clark, with o letter, returning that gen
tleman his sincere thanks for the mag
nifcent advertisements he has bestowed,
free of charge, upon his book. &
DG An old topper, in the last stages of
the dropsy, was told by his physician
that nothing would save him but being
Ehpped. His Son, a witty little shaver,
here lcnt in, saying: A& ~ ~ A1
"DOn't you do it, poppy, for you know
there never was anything tapped in our
house that lasted morn week.
II ma The extended brandy of Massa-
chusetts finds a rival IN New York in the
shape of, what is known as atangle foot
whiskey, a beverage in use in the lower
wards of the city, and warranted, says a
New York paper, to s'upset an individual
at = distance of four hundred yards from
the demijohn containing it. !" aga
DG Nearly all the brave men have
been Of finely organized and therefore
nervous temperaments. Julius Caesar
was nervous, so was Napoleon, so was
Nelson. The Duke of Wellington saw
man turn pale as he marched up to a
battery. .z..g.@
''That," said he, seis., a brave man. he /
knows his danger and faces it. .
,DGrA fellow was doubling whether or
not he should volunteer to fight the Mex
leans. One of the flags waved before
his eyes, bearing the inscription "Vic-
tory or DEATH somewhat troubled and
discouraged him.
tssVictory is a very good thing" said
he, 8but Why put It victory or death2
.Jnst put it victory or crippled, and I'll
80 that"
baFA COED story is told by the Chi
cago Times about the Presidential ap-
.pointments of Postmasters in that State
One unluckyi appointee was compelled
ito decline for the reason set forth below:
ssDear rSir-Although I acknowledge
the honor Of my appointment, regret
to say / have yet an nnexpired term of
Eve years in the Penitentiary, which
eompels me to decline your Aattering of
fer"
pA-A Clergyman in New Hampshire
pulpit, having with great eloquence,
urged his congregation to abstain, on
Thanksgiving day, from all labor and all
business pursuits, and to attend church
in the forenoon, concluded with this
touching appeal:
AIf any Of the brethren are at leisure
in the afternoon, I should be pleased to
see them at my house, as I intend to take
that opportunity, should friends enough
assemble, to nloue nay baraa?'
praDo you remember the story of
Frederick the Great and the sentinel, on
very cold wintry. night? "Why don't
you smoker" asked the king, incog.
- aft is against orders-mustn't t, re-
piled the sentinel.
ooh, but you may give youleaye. !"
aCan't help it, ] mustn t."
aI tell you, fool, that I will bear youI
harmlessI am the king.
And what said the sentinel to that?
aThe king be d-d, what would my
captain say?"
Moral: Always obey your immedi-
ate superior.
~"We have scarcely recovered from
the habits of ertraudgamt expenditure pro-
,1duced by our overfowing Treasury,
durir,q several gears prior tohbe commence
nsent of my ad1ainastrdtioS. ."-.Buchon-
ans Message.
/, Now this is hitting poor Pierce pretty
hard. It will be remembered that the
opponents Of Pierce's administration
charged him with extrayagance and the
Democracy deniedit. But here we have
aOld Buck charging the same thing
.fnvery clear and decided terms. Scarce
" recovered from the habits Of ertrapo-
CANT e1penditus That's q good one.
Portsmouth, 1ribane.
(, pea-A doctor was employed by a poor
man to attend his wife, who was danger
ously ill The doctor gave hint that
he had ears of not being paid.