The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1860-02-04
JONES ON THE NIGaKR.

worthy OF DIS k,ndnees. 1nls 70 all however,
mere speculation.
JONES ON TINE NIGGER.
The Knickerbocker for this month has
good story none the less enjoyable for being
. most palpsble bit Of the way in which
"Jones," the "clever fellow" Of Repab-
lican newspaper establishment, 'sgot out "
the paper (The Genius) on an occason of
emergency, when the editor, who was . lave
yer, was detained away from home in law
suit. Editor writes to Jones, who was
Democrat, and Of course disliked the politics
of the sheet:
Possyville, Oct. 2, 1859.
DEAR JoNss:-Can't come till morniux.
Get out the paper the best you can. Write
short articles, and stir up the party for noa
giving their organs more assistance
p S.-By the editor: Be emphatic.
Jones. Touch 'em on the rawi
Paper owed its existence to Republican
party. Politics its very life-blood. Jones
had full powers and used 'em.
Genius appeared following editorial from
pen Of Jones: .y
The NICcER.-We admire him. We like
HIM. We love him. We 20 in for him.
We have but one idea, and that 10 nigger.-
We have but one dream, and that 10 ditto.
We preach but from one text, and that 10
ditto. We sing but one song, and that is
ditto. We play but one tune, and that u
ditto. We go our full length on niger
We are all over ditto. We are ditto in the
morning. We are ditto at night. We are
ditto oil the time. We live on ditto. We
sleep on ditto. Well die on ditto. And
yet nould you beliepe It, reader! The qs-
mus don't pay! -
Next morning enters infuriated proprie.
tor. "You internal scoundrcl!'' roared hs.
Jones evapora,ed. Stopped BY editor juss
coming in. "Jones," says editor, shaking
the paper at him, sslook here what have
you done?;'
"Reck on Eve touched EN- on the raw,'
says Jones.
"You've killed the paper" cried the pre-
prietor. "a .5.sa
"You'ye ruined me-" exclaimed the ed.
itor.
SHOW did you como to write such savage
article ?'' said the proprietor. 1855
To stir 'em up q little,' said Jones.
"The things outrageous" says the ed
itor.
E"It is a little emphatic, - said Jones. aaa
Finale-Rush Of Democrats and Repub-
licans to printing Office. Former exultant.
latter savage beyond bounds. Jones re-
lieved from further assisting in tho editorial
department of that paper, and set up by
Democrats as editor Of new Democratic
paper then and there started, in view Of
jones' manifest ability to stir 'em up,' and
'touch 'em on the raw
NEVER BEEN IN THE TOWN BEFORE.
Scan you direct me to the -- Hotel2',
inquired a gentleman with carpet-bag; Of
a burly Hibernian, standing on the steps Of
| the railroad station.
"Faitb," was the reply, "it's jist .hat
can do the same. You see You jist 70 up
that strate, till you come to Thaddy O'Mul-
ligan's shon. Then" 2f#
"But don't know where Thaddy O'Mulli-
gan's shop, as you call it, is.' ss
go, Faith, why didn't think Of that.-
Well, then, your honor must keep on till 70
git to to the apple womaA's stand, on the
corner of the brick church it is, and kane
that on the right, and go till ye git to the
sign of the big watch, and mind you don's
fall down there; then kape on little farther
till ye come to big tree, and after that you
turn to the right or left, but, by the bones Of
st. Patrick, don't know which,"
The traveller turned in despair to long.
lank Jonathan, who was standing close by.
and the same inquiry.
"Maybe you're going to put up there 7''
queried Jonathan.
"Yes, intend to-"
"Did you come from far oif?,'
"yes, from Philadelphia !' was the inps.
tient reply" a R.1o
"Got any more baggage 3'' said the i'm.
perturable Yankee.
"No, this all,' said the traveller, convin.
ced that the only way to get the direction
was to submit to the questioning.
"Going to stay long % as
| "Couldn't say was the reply, in rather
a crusty manner. "But Pm 10 hurry, and
would like to be directed asssF
"Wait a minute. Ireckon you're mar.
ried man, aint you ?" x
s'No, am not and now won't answer
anything more till you have answered.,'
"Well, squire," said the Yankee, coolly,
"Pd like to oblige you, but the truth 10, /
have never been in the town before my.
self.
Ia less than a minute, carpes.bap with
a man attached was seen hurryiny away
from that vicinity. He didn't find asking
directions OF any particular advantage. :
4 CvTwo thousand bushels OF catfish were
taken from Horizon Lake, Wisconsin, re-
Gently, in one day. The Milwaukee News