The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1860-04-23
The Inpe.ding Paper Crisis.


The newspaper revolution Of New York Is going o.
favoraby. Az the last accounts both mother and child
oy are aeSourns the New YORK morning paSsys 1n
breakfast, eating omeettss Ia HERALD, mullins la
Tribune, and spring chickens Ia Tines. AT Sing Sing
prison the papers eagerly welcomed aud the prison
ers get up earlier than eager are they TO
the intellectual treat which the audnS co,sr OF their
breakfast Al Utica Lunatc Asylum there grand ju.
bation each arrival Of the newspaper express train
The papers allowed 10 circulate freely among the in
durable patients, but are carefully kept from those who
revolution is doing we'll for little weakly REVOLUTION that
has not quite learned 70 revolve alone.
Our previous remarks on this stupendous movement
and hope they will do the honor 70 copy also the
present article, tacsng many sentences Is possible
The aIp puts our remarks under the hsaa ,1. ~
another wall or something very like wall. We are DIS
posed help the little revolution as much as possible,
anton or put out TO before has made great
noise in the world So We shall announce some new fes
il the ntenuou Of he New York newspaper pro-
pretors buy up all the stock Of the Camden and Amboy
Railroad and make hereafter simply newspaper rail-
road carrying no passengers or freight but used exclu
sively for the transportation OF New York papers.
necessary the State OF New Jersey will be bought Also
to secure q newspaper monopoly Tha purchase Of
the Baltimore and Pennsy Railroads will follow
and 30 on, until all the important lines in the Union
are bought up. II k expected that there will be no
necessity for people TO travel or send goods they will
live altogether upon newspapers and therefore the roads
are to be exclusively for newspapers corps
OF edore ana reporters, with complete offices OF
stors and forty cylinder presses for paper will be
established in every train, and there will be fresh ed
uon with the latest news, published at every station
where the train stops The advantage Of this arrange
ment In getting the very earliest accounts OF collisions
must be manifest TO every The effect OF this new
and magnificent newspaper railroad system will be 10 ex
tingubh the whole provincial press which every
paper in the Union except the HERALD, Times and tn
btsNe.
BY the time this system ls operation on land the pa
pers viii turn their attention 10 the ocean, and will mme
datey establish line OF one hundred first class through
Dydayght ocean Steamers to be employed exclusively
carry the New York papers TO the ends of the world
The instantaneous consequence Of this will be the entire
extinction OF the provincial press all the world,
beginning with the London Times, which will wall
in anticipation Of It, just as the Bulletin walls
from business and their establishments will be taken for
newspaper agencies. Louis Napoleon will abdcae and
AK for employment a. "devil,' and the firm Of Vic
toria and Albert will open q newspaper shop In the
Strand By extending this system over Europe, all the
nations will be brought under government; the New
York papers will be able to make European politics TO
suit themselves; the Tribune will have more SLEEVE
CANNON blunders, the Times will have more quadri.
lateral articles and the HERALD will not talk about pos
sible marches OF . French army through Hanover 70
reach Italy. This will have fine effect and will save
the reading public from the bewilderng miseries that
they endure under the present absurd system govern
ing Europe, whish always different from what the New
York papers say it ought to be. r.
After this world fully revoutionized and put in good
running order by the New York papers, they will turn
their attention TO the Noon Then look out for another
wall from the provincial lunatc press