Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1860-11-29
VARIETY.
~per~onai.-


n very obliging person is the boarding bcu-e
keeper who advertiscs in the HsraLf--
Single gentlemen furnished with pleasant
rooms also one or two gentlemen ,sifl rires"
This Is match for the steamboat captain.
card OF n water excnrsioa---
Tickets IS cents Childrrn half price--io Be-
hal AZ Ne kD'disg-
ss5-Ihere is great cuisines. done nj New
York city in neck ties. but not near a. large a,
there ought to be.
Pyrctechnical remedy FOR an infantile CRYING
nuisance-Rocket
All who take the beet of drinks are always
t-c.9supplied.
II Is Oilener women than her wrongs that
ncc'is TO be rcdr--rd.
Had Adam been modern. there would have
bcen a hrsl girl in Paradise To look out for lit
tie Abel and raise Cain
pzS-An oil bachelor AXIS why one of the
old Ncnition prisuns is like marrying BecAusc
1T l. An awful cell
f'as-Uive me kiss, my charming Sal said
ic'cr 90 a blue-eyel gal No that won't YOU
lazy elG screw up your lips and help your
selE
HsJ-A was called out aloud in the ri. OF Dru-
~ lane Tboatr, MIR. Smith your hot-e in ga
fire wbercuPon a hundred and twenty-five
Smiths arc-,.
Il, is Mr.. John Smiths housc, ,aid he anil
thirty sat down, showing bu, ninety five yenu.
inc John Smiths Prcsent.
n5-A number of negroes were sleeping
around "A wood fir in the forest As Is their Gus
tom with their fet ia the ashes. when one
reused up and exclaimed. Take caru iar,
smell something; some daFkcys foot burning
Gosh !" said h. jerking up hi- pedestal. dds
niggcr's foot, artcr all.
s1S-kansas must have been the State in which
the boy rccided Who wrote hoase To his father, in
Pennsylvania, follows:
Dad, dad. move right out here. QUICK. f,r
mighty mean mrn get elected Ia Office in TIN.
STATE
h<S-If there is anything hAts. IL Is = wo-
man with laPdog! | always want TO drown
It and put baby in it, place." says Fanny
Fern, forgetting thar too often the lAp-dog own
ers fccl the same way, but take the dog because
they cant have the baby.
Iz-Dont marry too smart girl, for she
will out ran you; one two simple for chil-
drn take their talents from their mother; nor
too rich. for she viii remind you Of il; nor too.
poor. for she viii act tIie bc.gar on horseback
IL Sie,iio frfissnHEs IBIS
tara Pious old lady wa. asked why she
named her dog Moreover
Why said she. putting up her spcctacle- 10
find the place in the Bible it i Bible name
here -" Moreover the dog came and licked his
sore"
EssJ-- viii bcquca,h," aid an Irishman in
bis will, to my bcloV~l wife all my property
without reserve, and 20 my oldest son Patrick
our-half the remainder and 10 Dennis. INV
youngest son the rest. IL anything j. left it
may 90 to Terrence McCarty in sweet Ireland"
hsS-A man with an intetera,e habit Of talk.
ing to himself when aske,i why. said ~ had
two reasons -
Orc, he liked to talk to n sensible man the
other he liked to hear a sensible man talk
sz6-A man passing through GATEWAY in the
dark hii has nose against post II wish that
poet was IN hill. said he Better wish !, was
somewhere el-e, 4" said bys,ander. you might
run against Is again
Hsv-An editor cot IN che western part of
Michigan l. IN fix lie dunned a subscriber
ior ins subscription be- pf,ses To paw. and
ihrsa''n' 10 hng the editor II h. stopped tbp
paper.
h4'-A lsr-eu hnIn@i Oven Moprc once len
is'' eroh'ors somewhat uscerononiously, upon
which vag wrote
Owen Moor has rlH auav
hutn more thau be ruuld fsy
~ ilo f1ipsiuE i.aa alarming evidence ~