The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1860-03-17
AnArErn ArMxAsrlcs.

A Young Law Stuiknt," missnthrophit
dyspeptic, Who was ipluced to 'stry'' gym
nsstics. sends to the Hnickerbocker Maga-
zine some Of his experience in that depart.
ment of physical science. We clip and
quote:
ssl didn't attempt anything for good
while. sat and calmly surveyed the scene
l saw very little boy, who seemed TO be
QUALIFYING themselves for the profession Of
India rubber men. saw great strapping
men (nsv coners) attempt and fail in things
which fellows, whom they could put 10 their
pockets, did with ease. saw fesss per-
formed which seemed very hard, and which
turned out to be very easy; and which prov
cd very simple to look at, and spiitters to
try; | then took Of ny coat and went in.'-
pulled up the small weights I've or six
times; went slong. he horizontal ladder
and the parallel bars once or twice. went
home and found two fine blisters on my
hands next morning. Still went there the
next evening; exercised twice 40 much as
did before; feIt convinced that was getting
along very fast; and lay awake almost all
night, my arms schesasso.
Il stayed away Sbout week, and then
fell to work again manfully |; became ac.
quainted with a young gentleman who knew
the ropes' and under his guidance perform
cd many marvellous feats, and also met with
more mishaps than believe anybody ever
met with before, in the same space OF
time.
'.Being long and lean. and naturally awk-
ward, every new thing learned was usher-
ed in by disaster or two. But still per.
severed, for now Slept like II top aud ate
ut rate very alarming to my boarding house
keeper. persevered for two long months,
and was still in the 'full tide Of successful
experiment. when on going to the gymnasi-
um at my accustomed hour one evening, I
found q brilliant assemblage Of beauty
brought together by invitation OF the man.
ayers, to witness our performances.
81 disported myself on the floor some
time, until at length my evil genius impel-
led me to ascend, for the first time, ladder
which ron up one side of the room. Under
the horizontal part OF the ladder was TEN.
porarily placed spring board OF VT ose ex-
istence was unaware.
81 wiggled up the ladder With conyulsive
jerks Of the legs, the audience looked on in
respectful silence; but when / had reached
the middle Of the horizontal part, loeomo
tion became impossible Icostd neither 60
backwar nor forwards, but hung aus-
pended between heaven and earth, like Mo-
hammed's coffin. l squirlned about with
my legs, but could 6nd no'rest for the sole
of my feet. could bold on no longer, and
as the distance wasn't very great, deter.
mined to drop to the foor Us gracefully as
possible, and persuade the audience that it
was done on purpose. So / let 20 and
down l camo perpendicularly-and up !
went ssfying" / had come down on my
feet upon the spriRgboard!
"My first impression was chaos; my
second was, that had dropped into the
mouth Of cannon just as it was going of.
Up went, like a shuttle cock, almost to
the ladder. ut which ! made desperate
but Intellectually CLAW, which threw me oat
of the perpendicular, and forn eame,
bang! in sitting posture; up went again,
and gathered my legs under me Distracted
ly as rose; so that when dropped again,
was shot in a slanting direction, head
formost, catapult into the waistcoat of q
two hundred pound man, who was looking
on in open. mouthed nstonisbment. Down
he went squelch and over him went,
like lightning, into the dressing room! l
rushed into my clothes, aud out Of the bull
ding, and have never entered . gymnasium
since !"