Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1860-05-28
7TDrsNTAnIsNrs.

= Tears--a female substitute for reason.
--Woman's body-guard--her crinoline. 4.
'Is-- How often love-matcbes turn out lucfer-
matches
The dullest eyes, in the Scrptural sense,
have beams in them.
Few women SO icy that the sun of flattery
will not melt them.
Persons who plume themselves on any
thing are naturally in high feather.
Many men are past praying for, but not
past preying on.
When young woman faints, no man of
gallantry should doubt it is a genuine feint.
Dyspepsia is like civil war, as both arc
the result of intestine feuds.
No one who has observed the course of
affairs in the Eternal City, lately, can doubt
its condition is Rome antic.
An orthodox Christian should never
place hiswatch to his ear; for then he becomes
a hear-a-tick.
1t is quite natural that when woman
reigns she should storm-and she always
does.
"A pretty girls sentimental religion: II
an agreeable fellow kiss you on one check,
turn to him the other also.
-Hysterics-a pleasant sham women in
dulge in when they desire TO carry point,
or know ofnothing else to do.
The poorest proof las society and the
world are, of woman's love- is her willings
ness to marry you.
Women, instead of wasting their love on
their gallants, should husband their affec-
tions.
"A journalists headquarters are his
brains, which may account for the fact that
many of the fraternity are so difficult to find.
Why was Petrarch more barbarously
treated by his mistress than any bard before
or since his timer Because he was the poet
Laura-ate.
Madame de Stael says: 'There is some-
thing in the unhappy marriage that tran
scends all human misery" She might have
added-"except happy marriage"
Women become interested in rcputed
rakes, they say, with the hope of reforming
them and the result too often is, the women
themselves require reformation.
When men quote the Solomonic aphor-
ism; "a living ass is better than dead lion, u
they should be believed, since they usually
speak from self-knowledge.
Melancholy men please the opposite sex
because every woman somehow thinks then
miserable on her account, and that it is in
her power to make Manfred happy by an offel
of love, which he can not but despise.
"A married man, reading in the Press the
other day that there was prospect of The
plague visiting America, said "ConfounC
the plague I've been living with one fol
ten years, and am quite used to it,"
old maids-a class of sensible women
who refuse to accept husband until the,
find some one they can love and esteem
which of course they rarely do.
- Consideration for advertisers-some O
our contemporaries, it is said carefully keel
everything interesting out of their new
| columns, for fear of withdrawing the atten
tion of their readers from the advertisements
-Genealogy Settled for All Time-We arr
| authorized to state by distinguished Hiber
mean that, since the discovery of the Irisl
| origin Of Adam and Eve, that all persons o
note since the creation, and all that may b.
prominent hereafter have been and will b.
necessarially Of Irish nativity.
A practical individual in drinking
saloon, hearing partially inebriated gentle
man quoting Ion,
| -''it is
little thing to give cup of water
replied, eyes, d-d littlel A fellow tina
wouldn't give you glass of lager beer ough
to be kicked"
"A woman advertised in one of the New
York papers to be silent for forty-eight hour
on wager of $1,000 The announcement
created sensation, and hundreds went Il
see the female who had made such startlin,
and unprecedented proposition. Poor crea
ture, she was incurably insane; having be
come so by numerous abortive attempts +
hold her tongue for fifteen consecutiv
minutes.