Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1860-11-26

The Constant Punster n SOCIAL Pest-A
.aFeminine BOhemian's Protest Against
-cCalembOurgss
20 HAda Clare,p who has earned for herself
the reputation of the Queen of Bohemia,
contributes the following to the New York
Saturday Press:
The Joke is the tyrant and the slayer of
conversation. 1t tramples upon anecdote,
slaughters argument, and sets its foot upon
the neck of narrative.
p OF course l. refer to mere superficial, un-
meaning play upon words.
might imagine specimen example of
the thing, as practiced by the licensed joke
wrights. .-.
remark, for instance, on the lovely color
Of Laura Keene's hair.
Tip replies, being high above all interest
in human hair,---'T am glad to hear you
say So" ~. 49, ..-.-,t7f -.
(hair)itage." .,.-
Pip: n am afraid to regard her, lest /
should commit a heresy chair see.) ...
Nip Grip, Ftp, Sip, Dip, and. the rest of
the jokingmen go ON to add their cruel puns,
till ], disgusted and sore, am obliged either
TO practice voluntary dumbness, or to sail
upon the soft streams of garment and dress
general, which ] thank thee, Joyel the pun
When the punsters have all roared at and
applauded each other, meekly try to intro
duce another subject. l select the simplest,
the most one-sided, the baldest words in
order to offer no bait to the fishes; But
hope in vain; before l have concluded my
innocent remark, am laid lifeless on the
floor Of conversation, by one of the most
barefaced and shameless puns it has ever
come into the mind of man to conceive.
did but remark in tender innocence the
superiority Of homemade bread, when
being calling himself poet and q man of
feeling, replied that "bread is very much
kneaded (needed)p After this, there is no
Promethean heat that can my light relume.
II see no reason why the punsters should
not manufacture among themselves hand
book of punniBg. Or an encyclopedia, or
an almanac, or dictionary of the pun gem
eral. The puns would admit of very easy
sifeation, as they vary very little, follow ar
bitrary rules, and like strict conservatives,
cling tenderly to the precedence of the past.
In consideration Of which last fact the pro-
fessional punster is touchingly devoted to
the annals of antiquity.
q. s Had / time, l might enumerate large
number of venerable puns, but they will
probably all appear in the new volume which
have suggested, "Punning without mas
ter" D--s
: There is a class OF popular jokes, which
shall refer TO, only hy presenting specimen
of the same. Let Silas for instance, observe
that be loves such an one, because that one
calls out his (Silas's) good qualities. Hiram,
who ispresent, immediately answers, with a
smashing assumption of originality and wit,
"Ah! It's q pity, then, that he could not be
kept always near you, Silas." Hiram Is
man of great ability he despises the COM
mon-place in others, yet he can not resist the
temptation Of parading this mold and worm
eaten witticism, this feeble two pence worth
of grin-making, out to the public eye. Such
is the force Of evil habit and evil communi-
cations. ''t
q Think how many pert and silly answers
Silas might have made to that-but he did
not. 9--f.-
Il On the other hand there is a quality called
humor, which | love as much as l fear the
other. This is the quality which ornaments
the grim commonplace of life, with dra-
perry Of green and sun-lightened ivy. II ex-
tracts the sting from the irritating pettinesses
of everyday living. How much easier all
annoyances are to bear, if you are able to
extract from them one quaint idea, one
'thimblefull of natural laugh. Just when
parties of three are about to break up in
dreadful tumult, if one of them gently brings
forward comic view of the subject, peace is
restored, and anger and pride and envy go
back TO their cells.
VI Ills ANp7VlA liiS liSAiNI TIC laS
the journey, the dinner-party are unsafe, are
wont to be failures, unless the humorous
element Is alive in them.
But the jokewrights scorn and lOathe this
humor.
! am apt TO take extreme views on all
subjects, So think humor is the smiling
rounded, flesh filed form, while the pun, the
word racking,is is the grinning, vacant, empty
skeleton.
There is an inquisition established in oul
liberal land-'tis for the tormeRting of words
They are thumb-screwed, hung up will
weights, roasted in slow fires, broken on th
wheel, unjointed on the rack, in order tina
they may yield witticisms, which their soul
cry out against.
am carrying bottle of sulphuric acit
in my pocket, and the first person who ask
me in pastry-coOk's shop if am ''piousll
inclined ] ana going to distribute it owe
his countenAnce, and send him forth branded
a Cain among the punsters.