Daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1865, 1860-06-06
WITTY WoNEN.

= = = w Van A1ANs
We think it is Sir Edward Bulwer who
says, somewhere: "Wit, when it plays with
the lightning, is grand; when it wrestIes
with the storm, it is imposing; but when
it whistles through the keyholc, it is dis
gushing" 1t is probably because female
wit is ordinarily of domestic turn, and
whistles through the kcyIiole, that men
dislike it, and that the following article is
all of point and truth. One thing is for
gotten in it, however, which we SUPPLY
Men doynot love much wit in women, be-
cauSe the mMjority of male humanity, be-
ing very dullrOgMes, and incapable of I'M
dcrStanding fine drawn witticism with
out an elaborate explanation, a witty wo-
man is n constant srourge TO their vanity,
and n perpetual repronch to their stupidi-
ty. Great wits, male or female, if they
marry, always marry fools.
witty woman! God save us from
such q monslrosity! Wit, in its ancient
embrnccry ofmucl and correct erudition,
is an admirable tlring, and gathers
about its possessor the regard of the good
and wise. In its modern sense, IL power
to bring into prominence the weakness
and tOihlcS of our fellow CrcuturcS-n dis
position to rGpartee and Millery--is Il re-
pulSivc accomplishment with the most
gifted of the male sex. With the female
! it becomes naWseous and most abOmina-
| blc trait. The faculty is so unnatural with
them, that it must have gcrminated aud
ripened into disgusting fruition under
strungc stimuli. Very few, indeed, of the
stOricd females af modern time have sue
cecded in attaching this offensive peculiar
ity to their regulations. After earnest
study and energetic thought they have
thrust their literary productions before the
world. Having thus obtained name,
they haye been hunted from their privacy
nate their wisdom in the freedom Of un-
restrained conversation among coteTie oil
their EQUALS. They will not yet unseX
! themselves. Conscious oftIeir own human
| itv. they aim not to ferret out the faults OF
others. imbued with an elevated sense oftc-
male decorum, they avoid giving offence
Theymay effulgc in brilli"mcy ofrhctoric, or
in peculinrity or strength ofidcas. Ihcy ntT,
or woand by personal attack. Why should
they? They live in world of educated
sentiment: there is no necessity with them
of descending to gross alluslonS anu
stinpinr diatrbcs There is one noted
execution to our pleasant theory. Her
life. too, illustrates the unhappy fate OF
| those of her sex who emulate the character
and fame of witty women. With all her
I.Iporninp and conversational brilliancy, we
fancy there is no true woman vino enNleS
Madame dc Stacl Her vanity tuttercd by
victory in personal encounters, and pro-
vokcd by occasional opposition, she soon
descended to coarse and indecent lhN"c-
tive. The SAVIOR and soul of wit is con
nnest. Gcntleness, amenity, and polite
ness are brushed aside us II web of goss;-
mer, so that on adversary is brought low.
A certain result was the avoidance OF her
lOwn sex. Their. pride was Inundated oy
lher rerpctual. parade of learning; they
were unwilling to endure her strenuous
and taunting repartce. They thought
truly that the social circle and the soirec
were desecrhted by her egotism ana tantH-
Using attacks. n woman cannot he n WI
and n lady. So her wHrmest friends, by
avoiding her presence, drove her into So
cinl coventry. The witty woman bemoans
hrr want of appreciation on the part OF
her own SEX How often does she adopt
such yuse as a salvo to her mortified van
81 itv. after her own sex haveldiscRrded hel
c0mnnniouship! She affects male So
ciety when her own sex repudiate her.
AS ifin concert with her own views and tC
5 further soothc her wounded pride, the flat
> tered male assures her that the sex, o
which she is such IL distinguished member
fear her. Her mnle friend isright. Her owr
} sex do fear her. it is the fear that uellcacS
and female modcsty and propriety VIII
ever entertain toward ustcntatiOus gross
ness and unmanncrly piquancy. The te'
f male wit, dishonoren fugitive from hel
own sex, and bcckouing to her aid false
and gloomy pride, commits grierou'
Z. mistake in supposing that her loss OF te
male regard will rebound in male Hdmira
tion These crave adventure and arr
fond of mArvels. A vOluble, sneeTing
captious, taunting-iu fine, witty wo
man attracts them as does wild neAs
of the Jungle or any other monstrosity.-
i They like to witness the 'rollickinGs "nt
partial indecencics of q mnd-cAp stag
actress. They will applaud your femal
Wit TO the echo and flnttcr her into still
wilder ecceutricities. She will never pen
citrate the hearts of her applaHders-an'
!, why? She has unseXed herself. Ou
# true and desirable man hunts TOR sottnes
e and tenderness, and modest retiracy
70 heart and mind and manners, in mothc
3 and sister, and sweetheart and wife. Z
le he will wcnd to your abode. He will escoI
ID YOU through thuroughfares and to places
, amusement lie will laugh mt your hnPp
conceits and flashes of ridicple, apd pro
woke you into constant exercise OF you
soul tainting faculty. In fact, you anus
V him. If YOU conquer him with your wea
mons OF raiIIeFy, it does not humiliate hin
=. If YOU could follow him npon rctlrln
from your presence, you will see h'm. 81 ~
=, gagged in sweet and earnest-conversc Wal
~ ,S ~ tender-hcarted girl, who will soon |
ia his bride. Intelligent men want no bait
- of wit at the home fresIde; they woul
Se os soon mate with sharp -clawed ca
:, ,.,;tt, ca,,al ln wits You will glide on