Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1860-04-09

/" OH, MR.. JONES'"
AN ADVENTURE IN THE c.p

~ Adv RE IN THE CARS.
There were five of us-yes FIVE as happy fell
lows as were ever let loose from college. II was
vacation, and we concluded to take trip to
the Falls. We got aboard at N, and were
soon travelling rapidly toward our destination.
We had just seated ourselves and prepared
Tor comfortable smoke, when in came the
conductor, and who should it be but our old
friend, Fred B. After the common salu-
tations, " How are you, old fellow" ETC., etc .,
had passed, Fred remarked he had some busi.
ness for US to attend to.
''Out with it, old chum, said we; 'sanythipp
at all will De acceptable, so let us have it.
"Well, boys" said Fred, in a very confden.
tial tone, sin that next car there is as loving a
pair as was ever my lot to see. They are going
down to A to get married, and now if you
can have any fun over it, just pitch in Thew
must be cared for, and don't know who can
do it better than you"
In moment Fred was gone, and we set our
of the lovers
II have it, boys" said Bill Sewers: "we
must make that girl think that her lover is
married"
That's it, Bill Seevers-that's it," said we,
not giving him time to finish the sentence.
That he is a married man and the father of
children said Bill.
That's the game, boys, now let us play it. >
1t devolved upon me to commence operations
Accordingly entered the car in which we were g
informed the lovers were The girl thinking.
suppose, that she must give her lover all the
seat, had taken seat on his knee; and he, for
the purpose of protecting her. of course had
thrown his arm around her waist; and so they
sat. in real, soft loving style.
All this gathered at glance. Stepping up
to them, / said
Why, Jones, what in the deuce are you do
ing with this girl %
The girl arose hastily, and seated herself on
the seat.
see here, stranger" said the fellow, "you
are mite mistaken; my name amt JONES'
Why, Jones, said 1, ''you certainly have
not left your wife and children, and tried to
palm yourself off for single man, have you ~
tell you my name amt Jones; its Harper.
1t never was Jones' 'taint goin' to be- -
merely shook my head, and passed on to
another seat, to see the rest of the fun. The
girl looked "wild" after sat down. out Jones
alias Harper soon convinced her hat L was
mistaken.
About the time they got to feeling quite well
again, In came Ell Gregg. Walking up 70
EIarper, he accOsted him with:
Why, Jones, you here How did you leave
yOSr wife and babies2"
Now see here, stranger, you amt the fust
man that's called me Jones to-day, an must
look awfully like him; but I ain Jones
hain't got a wife. nor babies either. but this
ere gal an Inc is gOin' to splice, and then Won
can talk about my wife, and wouldn I wonder
but what IN the course of time you might talk
about the babies, too; but you mus mt call me
Jones'
This retOrt brought forth vocferous laughter
from the spectators, and it also brought bushes
to the face of 1.-THE gal that was goin' to be
spliced."
'Ah. Jones, said Gregg, you will regret
this in the future. 1 really pity your poor wife
and children and this poor girl
$50, Mr.. Harper: your real name is Jones' is
IT, an you have been fooin' me, have YOU
We'll, we amt spliced yet; and don't think
we will be very soOn," said the young girl,
and her eyes fairly flashed with fire.
Jane, Jane, said Harper, don you know
IN Bill Harper Thar amt darn drop of
Jones blood in me, and I'll prove it."
At this moment, JEFF Jackson, Bill Sewers
and jun Byers entered, and of course their
attention was called to Harper by his loud talk
ing. They stepped up to him and said.
why, Jones, what is all this fuss about %
This was more than Harper could stand. He
1eaped upon seat.
Now" said he, my name amt Jones. and
L can lick any feller that says it is"
BY this time we had got to A, and Fred
came into the car and made Bill Harper keen
quiet. The girl that wouldn't be s'splicedt
requested Fred to help her on the train tha,
was going back to N, which he did, and
the notorious Jones, alias Harper followed
We heard afterwards that he proved himself
to be Bill Harper instead of Bill Jones, and he
and his gal got EEspliced -