The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1860-08-21
Rirbmonh 9!spatth.
,rcn.y MORNING AUG. q. 1850

An Indian, being at an Enelishmau's table
Al Surat expressed his surprise, by loud ex-
carnations, on seeing large quantity Of froth
CORR was drawn. Being asked what surprised
him, he replied 81 don't wonder at all the
froth comes out of the bottle; but how the
deuce did You ever contrive to squeeze 1t all
inl'
he did not venture to an election at which the
proceedings We're riotously conducted and
give his vote, replied ~ do not see why
should endanger my o,cn poll to benefit another
MANS
A loving couple during an evening walk
the Aurora Borealis, by which name he called
her attention, TO which She in seraph tones, re-
piled Aurelins Bolis what nonsense! them 8
nothin' but nor thern lights J"
The record of life runs thus: Man ereeps
into childhood into youth-sobers INTO
manifestations into age-totters ihto Sc
cond childhood, ard slumoers into tue efaoie
prepared for him.
where's your master, Pompey SAD an
angry creditor. the other day, to the black ser
want of An Incorporate debtor. up stairs,
sar,', Getting drunk, suppose - mo, sar,
he be getting sober
A rich banker gave beggar shilling, when
she latter exclaimed with gratitude, "May
Heaven reward you a thousand times ~ swell.
what would that amornt TOT only fifty
pounds I" answered the rich man. smiling
lyon always lose your temper in my COM
pany," said an individual of doubtful reputa-
ton to Il gentleman. True, SIR" replied the
other, land / shouldn't wonder If l lost every
thing have about me-"
Jones and Brown met at the Post Office
Jones complains of a bad smell about the Post
oiflce, and asks Brown what il can be Brown
doesn't know, unless ii may be the large num-
Der of dead letters there
tom, what's monomauy "Why, you
see, Dick, when poor woman steals it is
called larceny; but when it's a rich 'un, the
Jury says it's monomany, and can't help it
THAT'S it"
Papa know what makes some folks call
pistols horse pistols "Why, my son Z" BE
cause they kick So" sMary, put that boy to
bed he is so sharp he will cut somebody"
ado try 10 talk a little common sense" said
a conceited youth to young lady.
"Uh, but wouldn't that be taking an unfair
advantage Of you D.
A little boy, returning from the Sunday
school. said 10 his mother, MA, amt there a
ki;fy chism for little boys This cdf-echism
is 100 hard for me-
Whatever we may think of woman's right
20 vote AID legislate, there can be no disputing
her right 10 bare arms-and the prettier the
better and more irresistible.
In Japan there is not the slightest difficulty
an hiring even prince OF the blood for a body
servant. All you have to DO is TO insult him,
and he will let himself out Immediately.
The following notice might have been seen
some time ago stuck up in a corset-makers
shop window in Glasgow" All sorts OF Ia
dies stays here
To keep eggs from spelling eat them while
they are fresh. We have tried all kinds of
methods. but this we think is the only one TO
be relied on "in any climate"
Mrs. Darlington asks very Indignantly, if
the bills before Congress were not counter
zeit why should there have been such difficulty
sn passing them
ha Rullatin StataS hat Mrs
Anna Cora Mowatt Richie is writing a new
story for The Ledger, after the completion OF
which she is going To Europe.
An English paper advertises for sale "a per-
feet lady's horse' We don't care about the
horse, but the perfect lady would be worth
having.
If am about counting girl have but little
acquaintance with, how shall l come to a
knowledge of her faults. Answer.-Praise her
among her female acq ualntances.
"Where shall put this paper SO as to be sure
of seeing it to morrow - asked Mary Jones OF
her brother Charles. ION the looking glass ito
be sure" was his very prompt reply.
AT important omission in Shakespeare sup
piled A dramatic genius suggests that after
ali of the phrases "CIo to- in the great bard
h-ll should beinserted.
The reason that the Indians are so fleet of
foot is that from the habit they have of paint
ing themselves, they are accustomed to streak
ing it.
An aFllSl u CdHuOu so natural
other day, that when he finished the touch
hole il went off, Sorry to say it was taken by
the sheriff.
The last place in which l should look for
the milk of human kindness, is the pale of CIV
iliZation.
However poor opinions steamboat captains
may have OF each others boats when running
races, they very likely think them passa5le.
Why is an invalid, cured by sea bathing,
like a confined criminal Because be is sea-
on cd kSacnrpl