Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1860-06-14
For the Yorkville Enquirer.
LETTERS FROM A FATHER---No. 8.


For the Yorkvflle Enquirer.
LETTERS FROM FATHER---No.s 8.
Nesss. Editors IL have mentioned to you
more than once, that my dear wife, among the
other blessings which have grown out Of our
union, has favored me with o large family Of
children; yet have spoken Of none except the
four eldest-Jane, Eliza, Catherine and Benjamin.
Polly-my wife's name. that-seemed to be in
no'hurry as to her fifth; and therefore waited
four years, when, after indulging her leisure to
her hearts content, she presented me with little
Charlie--the plumpest,, halest looking ten
pounder, you ever saw-and thought my happi-
ness was now complete. But in due time she ad-
ded another and still another, and still another TO
my household; when, after waiting again little
longer than usual, she finally closed the catalogue
by contributing her ''pet;" "ma's wee, dumpy
darling" Charles, then, is fifteen; Mary isgoing
on thirteen; Franklin, ten; George, eight; and
Ida isfour. All Of these, like the first four with
whom you and your readers are somewhat &C.
qusinted, are very healthy and stout children.
. feel grateful to Heaven, and Polly for this
inestimable blessing to my children. sbe has
been very leisutely, contsntedz and cheerful
spirited woman all her fife.. When i saw that
my responsibilities were increasing as my family
beeame larger, and would, fret myself about pro-
viding fer them and afnassing fortune; she al
ways with all her love Of display and aristocratic
tendencies, had sprightfiness in her sentiments
which acted like cooling and .inyigorating water
upon my feverish and fretful nature. She has
been model Of health and physical beauty, and,
in keeping with this, her spirits were high and
acted on me like charm Her philosophy has
been: sufficient unto the day is the evil there
off," fret not about the morrow; learn from ex-
perience what'to avoid and what to do; enjoy,
while they are passing, the good things Of life.
Yet, while this current of sound practical wisdom
runs through her nature, candor and the honest
purpose Of these letters compel me to say again
.thata stream Of overweening vanity-whioh isl
weakness with :us-mingles its poison-waters
with this current, vitiating alk r,.
Ifyou will allow me to digress alittle, in my
experience -andit has not been meagre-Lhaye
noticed that the desire to be loved and apprecia-
ted by man is very large in, woman-and often
largest lin the noblest and best Of womankind.-
This desire has been ssenin all ages and among
all nations, modifying her inner and outer life
according.to the tastes, sentiments and pursuits
of the men. The warlike character of the early
Britons, produced q Boadicea, who went to the
battle.deld.and fought in her chariot like hero.
The pastoral and Peaceful life of Labau and his
people, produced Rachel who was as tender.
hearted as lamb, and sweetly innocent as o
child. The high bad life of Roman courtiers
and generals might well have pursed the Egyptian
Queen into that wondrous beauty whose voluptu-
business maddened q Caesar and an Antony
The Christian philanthropy Of the present age is
in part expressed by such women as Miss Dix
and Florence Nightengale; ; its freedom Of thought
and action, by such as Miss Muloch and Harriet
Hosmer; its veneraton for the dead by such as
the Southern Matron,p and Mrs. iElletwho wrote
"The Women Of the Revolution"
This desire to be loved is noble, aud elevates
woman when not in excess, norprurient. But it
is made means by man Of cultiyating her self
love and vanity often to sadly injurious extent.
We speek-of wonan's influence over man; but
his is perhaps as great over woman. BE knows
the weak points where her heart is left defence
lees by nature, and there he makes his attack.
Flattery frivolous praise Of her beauty, her taste
in dress, or her accomplishments, and insincere
pretensions of love to her, mark the policy Of
too many while in her company. Her good
sense is thus discredted, and she, for mans
fault, is charged with being only vain and gossipy
in conversation. What is worse, her sense of
propriety and delicacy is often bluuted; her self
love and prideare ipHsmed into undue develope.
ment and activity; and she whoshould be to eve
ry young man only the means Of interchaDging
pure and truthful sentiments and cultiyating so.
cial virtue and refinement, becomes the victim Of
an ipsipid and senseless male.coquetry Let the
great aim Of young men and women be to i'm
prove each other, when they associate together,
and better state of things will exist. I know
they will apd must think Of marriage; the heart
as we'll as the head will enter into their talk;
but, let me say, one Of their chief means Of mu-
tual improvement is through the affections.
have no objection to young peoples loving
each other-and God in heaven has nons-but it
needs wise and generous and Christian -thoughted
regulations. One of-the greatest hindrances, I
have noticed during my life, to the beneficial in
tercourse Of the sexes when young, exists in the
fact that they cannot meet half dozen times
until it is bruited abroad that they are engaged
and intend to marry. Rather than get up such
an impression, to the injury Of the young lady
who might thereby be deprived Of real lover,
young men ore inclined 10 desist. Now, such
state Of things should not be; and would not, if
Madam Gossip was not so wise, garrulous and
prophetic. She, with her hundred eyes can see
into the middle Of next week; she is omuiscient;
she makes future Of her own; she marries
those whom heaven never thought Of uniting;
she breaks up "matches made in heaven" she
has hundred tongues and these are "loose at
both ends" but they all cannot tell half what
she sees and hears and dreams of every day.
Now, said Madam makes the impression on
every young mind, that grown up young people
never speak to EACH other without one eye at
least if not both, 70 marriage. These young
minds retain this impression when they 60 into
each others company. The consequence is, that
either pretended or real courtship constitutes
the "sum. pro. docket" Of their Conversation
From this again result, on the one hand, hasty
and indscreet marriages. on the other male and
female flirts, mutual distrust, and in the end old