The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-02-10
Genrral Misfellany.
An Editor on Skates.

Right beneath one of our windows, from
morn till midnight. We see Youngsters and
olds,ers twisting their legs in all conceivable
shapes. skating up and down the river. as
merry as lambs. We cannot pick up pa
per, but an article on skating" meets the
eye Everybody says it's fun. and that's all
ever. body knows about it. for we've tried it.
Last night, about gas light time, after read
ing glowing description of life on skates,
We prepared for our first attempt, and sailed
forth tc join the merry crowd. We had
pair of stoSa boots, trousers legs tucked in
side, robert-tailed coat and white hat. We
went down OH the ice, and gave boy two
shillings in good coin OF the realm, for the
the use of his implements. We had conf
dence even as great as Peters faith. We,
with the assistance Of friend, fixed on the
skates, and stood erect like BARRIERS pole
Encouraged by the sight of some ladies on
the bridge who were just then looking at the
skaters, we struck out. A slant to the right
with the right foot, slant to the left with
the left foot-and just then We saw some
thing OH the ice, and stopped to pick it up =.
On our feet agaE-two slants 10 the right
aud one TO the LETT, accompanied with loss
of confidence. Another stride with the right
foot. and We sat down with fearful rapidity,
and very little if any elegance! What a set
down it was. for We made Ii dent in the ice
not unlike Connecticut butter-bowl!
Just then one of the ladies remarked, "Oh,
look, Mary, that feller with the white hat
amt got his skates on the right place" Dit
to, thought We. Just then a ragged little
devil sang out as he slided past US. "Hal!o,
old timber legs" and ~e a, ose suddenly and
put after him, and away went our legs-one
to the east, the other to the west, causing an
immense tssure in our pants, and another
picture os butter tray in the cold-oh hom
cold ice! Then the lady-we know she
was one by the remark she made-again
spoke and said, "Oh look, Mary, that chap
with IA white hat has sat down on his hand
chief to keep from taking coldr' We rose
about as gracefully as saw-hurse. when
Mary said. Guess faint handkerchief
Jane" and Mary was right. Just then a
friend came along and proftered US his Goa,
tail as "steadier." We accepted the con.
,inua,ion Of his garment, ard up the rive,
We went. about ten rods, when shy TO tht
right by the leader, caused US, the wheel
horse, 10 scoot oft on tangent, with oul
heels up! Eut the ice is very cold this sea
son!
We tried it again. A glide one way,
glide and half the other, when whack cam,
our bump Of phiIoprogeni,iveness on the ice
and we saw million Of stars dancing arount
US, like ballet girls at the Bowrry THEATRE
How that shock ~ett through our system
ard up and down our spinal column. Ligh,
ming couldn't have corkscre~ed it down
creased saplng with greater speed or NOR,
.xhiera,ing effect. Guarding house butte
nor warranty deed could not have strucI
stronger than we did-and dozen ladies
looking at us-and our tissured pants!
"Hallo, old cock" Sang out that ragget
imp again. and We there helpless. Soo:: W,
got up and made another trial. with bette
success. Perhaps We had skated, in our pe
culiar style. fifteen feet, when blunderin,
chap came up behind, and We sat down witt
our tired head pillowed in his lap--and h,
swearing at US, when it was all his fault =
How cold the ice was there, too. Every spo
where We made our debut on the ict-ol
how cold it was! Our bearskin drawers wer
no protection at all. We tried again, for tn
papers all say it's fun, and down came ou
Roman Grecian nose on the cold juIep mat.
rial. and the little drops of crimson ran dow
> our shirt bosom, and on the cold ice
Once more we tried skating-nade for tn
, shore-sat down and counted damages. Tw
shllings in cash thrown away. Several lat
erial and one "fronternal" bumps on the ice
> Que immense fissure in as handsome a pai
Of ten dollar cassimeres as man ever pu
his legs in. One rupture in the knee, exten
: ding 20 the bone. Four buttons from GU
vest, "fragmented" watch crystal, and