The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1860-05-16

"Well, whot upon airth duz she doc it
fur p l inquired.
"She kant help it." sed the man in blak
close. ats the brand of Kane.''
swell, shede better stop drinkin Kane's
brandy" replied I. .... ........
II sed the brand of Kane was upon her
mot brandy, my trend. Yu are very OBJ
tuse." -r s-.
was konsiderabul riled at this, I tell yu.
Sez L ...............0.,s .......
"My gentle Sur, Tine nonresistanter as
| gineral thing & don't want to get up no
rows with nobody, but kin nevertheless
KAYE in ennyboddy's he'd that kalls me OBJ.
toose," with which remarks kommenced
fur to pull off my extra garmints. "Cum
| on" sez I-"Time! here's reglar Beniki
Boy fur yu!' & dsrnced round like pop.
pit. q :. -.-.,a- a.. . ..lz-s
He riz up in his sect 4 axed my pardin
-sed it was all mistake-that l was q
good man, etsettery, & SOW forth, & we fix
ed it all up plesent. 1 must sa the man in
blak close seemed to be as fine man as ev-
er was in the wurld. He sed Octoroon
was the 9Th of negrow. He likewise sta
It'd that the femail he was travlin with was
formurly slave in Mississippy that sheed
purchist her freedum & now wanted to pur.
chiss the freedom Of her poor old mother,
who (the man in blak close obsarved) was
between 81 years of age and had to do all
the cookin & washin for 25 hired men which
was rapidly breaking down her konstitu.
| shin. He sed he knowed the mint he gaz-
ed onto my klassic and benevolent Ease that
I'd donate liburly, & axed me to 60 over &
see her, which l accordingly did. sot
down beside her & sed-
"Yure Sarvant, Marin! How do yer gel
alongi"' ="
She bust in2 tecrs & sed- .-.
20, Sur, Tme so retchid line poor
unfortunit Octoroon." ..
$50 larn. Yure rether more Room than
Octo, 1 take it," sed I, fur I never seed q
pulitzer gal in the whole endoorin time Of
my life. She had on more Antic Barsk &
Poplar Nubies with beragc trimmins onto
it, while here Ise & kurls was enuff to maik
a man jump into mill pond without bid
din his relashuns good by. pitied the
Octoroon from the Utmost recesses of my
hart & hawled out SO dollars ker slap & told
her to buy her old muther as soon as posi-.
bull
Sez she, "Kine Sur, mutch thanks" She
then lade her he'd on my showlder and sed
was "old rats" .......-
Twas astonished to hec this observashur
which knowed was never used in refined
society, & perlitely but emfattercly showed
her he'd away.
'sSez I, "Marm line trooly sirprized."
Sez she, "Git out Yurc the incest olt
man I've seen yit. Give US another $50 7
Had seleck assortment of the most tire
mendous thunderbolts descended down ont,
me coodent hav ben more takin aback.-
jumpt up but she ceazed my cote tales
in wild voise cridc-
mo, I'll never dcsart you-lct US I'll tu
gether to q forrin shoar
Sez I, "Not much we WON'T" and made
q desperate effort tn get ava from her.
"This is plade out" sed I, whereupon she
ierked me bak into the sect. "Leggo my
coat, yu scandalous femail," roared, wher
shet set up the most uneaathly yelling anG
hollerin yu ever heerd.
The passinjers and the gentlemanly con
ductor rusht tn the spot & don't think
ever expeeriunsed sich rumpus in the hui
corse of my material days.
The man in blak klose rusht up tn me 4
sed: t+
"How dair yu insult my neece. yu horey
heded vagabone! Yu base exhibbitter o
low wax fggers-yu woolf in sleeps close,
& SOW 4th
Twas konfoosed. I was loonytick ful
the time bein and offered S. reward to emmy
gentleman of good morrul carrictur wht
wood tell me whot my name was 4 who
town lived into.
The konductor cum tn me & sed the in
suited parties wood settle fur $50, which
immejetly hawled out, and agane imploaret
} sumbuddy to state WHARF was prinsipully
if shood be thare crate while mysel
myself ef things went on as theyde ben 60
! in fur sum time back.
then axed if thare wsso enny moar Oc
toroons present, "becawz," sez I, ''ef Their
is let them cum along fur I'm in the Octo
room bisnis"
then threw my specterkuls out of tn
winder, smasht my hat wildly down owe
my Ise, larfed highsterically and fell unde
sect. la thare sum time & fell asleep
! I dreamt Mrs. Ward and the twins had bel
carried orr by Rynosserhosses 4 that Bald
! insvill had been captured by an army o
Octoroons. ..~s.-.... ..-....... .r.
} When awoked the lamps was burni.
dimly. Sum of the PASSENGERS was a snor
in like pawpusses & the damsell in the PIN
gown was singin LOT in the Silly nite
The onprinsipuld Octoroon & the miserabu
: man in blak close was gone, & all Of a sud
dint it flashed ore my brane that Ide bel
swindlid. I'll boste no moar of bsin smart
aa Sorrefully yours,
. ARTEMUS WARD.