The weekly pioneer and Democrat. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn. Territory) 1855-1865, 1860-04-27
miscellaneous Items.

Miscellaneous Items.
"DID you go to Dr. Dow to be cured of
lispiDg?" asked gentleman of girl who
had been tonguetied,
"Yeth, thir," was the reply.
"What did he do to you?'
"He cut little thring there wath under
my tongue"
"Did he cure your"
"Yeth, thir."
"Why are you lisping now? ?"
cam l, thir? Well, don't pertheive
that | lthp, ecthept when | go to thay
thickthpenth. Then l alwayth notlihe it."
A PATHETIC OBIrUARY.--The State Of
Indiana has recently lost, by death, one of
its citizenship. james Bangs. We find an
obituary notice of him in Hoosier paper
M,stur Editur--Jem bangs, we are sorry to
staff, has desized. He departed this Life
las munday. Jem was GENERALLY considered
gud feIler He died at the age of % years
old. He went 4th without airy struggle,
and such is Life. tn Day we are as pepper
grass--mity smart-to Morrer we are gut
down like cowcomber of the grownd. Jem
kept nice store, which his wife now waits
on. His virchews wos numerous. Mtnny
is things we bot at his growcery, and we
are happy to state that be never cheeted,
speshully in the waite OF mackrel, which was
Mise and smelt sweet and his survivin wife is
the same wa. We never new him to put
sand in his sugar, tho he had big sand bar
in front of his house nor water in his Lick.
ers, tho the ohio River run past his dore.
Piece to his remains
"a M1s'ABLE N1GGER."- My friend asked
Anthony Rox, a superb engine driver on the
Ohio river, how he came to get free. " Why,
Massa Vincent, my health was berry bad
when l was in Kentucky; l couldn't do no
kind OBJ work was berry feeble; twas
les as much as | could do to hoe my own
garden and eat de sass and de missus what
owned me see dat | was mis- able niger
one of the mis- ablest kind. So said to her,
Missus, I'm a mis'able niger, and l ant
worth nothing, and | tink you'd better sell
me, I'm such mis'abe Niger Now,
Massa Vincent, | was such poor niger,
that Missus greed to sell Inc for a hundred
dollars, and | greed to try to work and
earn de money to pay her, and | did,
and my health has been gittin' better cher
since, and | 'specks made bout nine hun>
|
The DEMONSTRATIONS was travelling
with his wife, and tor freak was so gal,
liant in bis behavior to his cara Sposa, that
madam grew uneasy and demonstrated
against his attentions as too marked for
public obersation. "The d--l." said
Jones, "were married, suppose ?" Eyes"
said the lady, but, judging by your de-
pertinent, folks will think we amt :"
d" Well what of it ," said Jones. Why,
not much, certainly, for you," said the care>
full dame, "you are man; but we women
have our characters to take care Of" Jones
was shocked into propriety for the rest OF
the journey.
COMPOSITION FOR A BOARDING School
GIRL.-"The Rose.-Tne rose is the pretti-
est and most perfumable of all flowers. Al
though little out of fashion, it is very nice;
it is sweet, pretty and 0, so sweet. The
rose has several languages, all speaking OF
love. 1t is SO nice to converse with flowers.
do love it SO much. The rose blows in the
early winds Of June. The early winds OF
July blows the rose away. That is so sad
so much like human life the rose 50 like a
beautiful maiden, and the rude winds so like
the cold and unfeeliug world 1t is not nice,
but alas so very sad
A BOYS COMPosITIoN-"On the seasons.
There is four seasons spring, summer, au-
tumn and winter. They are all pleasant.
Some people like the spring BEST but, as
for me, give me liberty or give me death
The end"
MARY, THE LITTLE MIssIoNARv.-By the
Editor of VGnug Fdir.-"Mary's uncle
Charles came to see her, and gave her a
bright gold dollar. Then said Mary Now
| will buy some candy, and some chewing
gum, and picked lime and | will give
Sarah Jones two cents and the woman on
Broadway with the little baby three cents. y
But Mr.. A. Sleek, that good man, heard
her, and be groaned, and he said; MARY,
remember the Pottawattomiees y SO she
gave her dollar to good Mr.. Sleek for the
Pottawottamies and when he took it, he
was kind enough to say that he wished the
Pottawottamies might get it. And Mary
was made life member of Mr.. Sleek's So
ciety. Was not that better than picked
lime?"
AT Dieppe, in France, the following no
tice was recently issued "The bathing
police is requested, when a lady is in danger
of drowning, to seize her by the dress and
not by the hair which oftentimes remains
in their grasp. Newfoundland dogs will
also govern themselves accordingly -
A VERY pretty and respectable young
woman stole several yards of ribbon from 6
shop in Troy a few days ago. She was
left alone and couldn't resist the temptation
The shopkeeper accused her of the theft
and after much trouble found she had wound
the ribbon around her = stockings, be-
ginning at one ankle and passing the stock
ing, of course, ending at the other. In this
ingenious, but we must say, indicate man.
ner, she had concealed large quantity
but the shopkeeper forgave her and let bel
60 free, as he considered the privilege O
recovering his property by unwinding it
ample atonement.
On one occasion, when John Kemblt
PLAYED " Hamlet in the country, the gen
> teman who acted Guildersten was, Oh
imagined to be, capital musician. " Ham
let" asked him, Will you play upon this
pipe?" "My lord, 1 cannot" 81 do
beseech you" "Wel, if your lordship
,, insists upon it, shall do as well as can. y
! And to the confusion OF Hamlet" and
xl,o <s,ook &c tho anNippoQ he