Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1860-06-16

w
stores ore sometimes the scenes of ludcrous
conversation. The other day young lady
stepped into we'll known establishment in
town, and inquired of fine looking young
clerk "Sir, have you any mouse .colored
ladies' gloves ?" Mouse coered ladies', miss z"
"Yes-a sort Of grey-just the color of your
drawers, here," meaning the store drawers, OF
course, which were painted grey. "My draw
ers. miss !" calculated the young man, glanc-
ing downward, to see if everything was right
and tight. "My drawers, miss why don't
wear any" The young lady was carried homo
Oh shutter.
COULDN'T Fool HER.--The Lafayette Cou-
rier tells an amusing story of some young
ladies and gents Of that place, who we're taking
social walk near the cemetry when O ghost
appeared. They allran but one sturdy woman
OF the strong. minded class, who stood to her
post, when she seized it, and thrust out of his
frightful disguise mischievous fellow who had
heard the project Of walking near the grave
yard discussed and hid himself there to give
the party fright. She led him back to the
house, and in reply to the questions that now
poured in upon her, said: Cant fool me |
have seen too many men an sheets to get
frightened at them !'
The REToRT-BY GEO. T. NORRIS
Old Nick, who taught the village school,
Welded maid of home.spun habit;
He was stubborn as o mule
She was playful as o rabbit.
Poor Jane had scarce become wife,
Before her husband sought to make her
The pink of country polished life
And prim and formal as Quaker.
One day the tutor went abroad,
A nd simple Jenny sadly missed him;
When he returned behind her lord
She silly stole and fondy kissed him.
The husbands anger rose and red
And white his face alternate grew;
LESS freedom, ma'am !" Jenny sighed and
said,
ooh, dear didn't know twas you"
n MODEL HUsBAND.-Hear what SAKE says
Of model husband
| saw model husband-in dream,
| Where things are not exactly what they
| seem;
A moral man, to skeptics be it known,
The wife be loved and cherished was-hi5
own;
With horse and chaise five minutes at the
gate,
While Jane puts on her things; nor speak
one sour
Or bitter word, though waiting half on hour
Fo! dinner and, like Patience on throne,
lie didn't swear to find button gone.
PARIS GossIP.-The gay season at Paris
has just been concluded At the masked
balls new feature has been introduced,
quadries composed Of characters represent
ing animals, flowers and vegetables.
At the ball of Edgar Ney, Prince Of
Maskwa, the costumes Of the gentlemen re-
presented animals, and those of the ladies,
flowers and vegetables. The Princes Of
Metternich represented az srtchoke. This
lady is o great favorite with the Empress.
At the ball of Minister Gould, the CO.'S
tunes of all the different nations of the world,
were represented.
At the lete of General Fleury, the Princess
Clotilde appeared as Amphtrite, and the
Princess Matilde as the wife OF an Indian
nabob.
A troupe representing the dramatst per-
sonG Of Perauli's fables, attracted much at
tention. Madame De Bee appeared as Puss
: in Boots wearing large boots, and having on
her head O diadem in the shape OF cats
head.
Whisky is now tested by the distance a
man can walk after tasting it, The new
liquor called "Tangle-leg," is said to be made
tobacco, aud will upset man at q distance
OF four hundred yards from the dimijohn.
A dandy negro stepped into store TO buy
soma potatoes but before purchasing he de.
livered the following on the nature OF the root
DE tater he am inevitably good or inewi
! tably bad dar am no medicumoerity in Dc
combination OBJ tater. De exterior may ap
pear remarkably exemplary, while de interior
: am totally negative but sein as dat you
wends the article on your own responsbly
} why, widout suckumlocution, dis culled pussoI
} takes peck"
, A Skeptic thinks it very extraordinary tha
an ass once talked like man. Isn't it still
, more extraordinary that thousands Of mel
are continually talking like assesS
Love letters oIce caused lady to exclaim
when the devil is desirous of deceiyiug
Q man or woman, be always puts pen i
a their hand"
I Every husband thinks that be can tame
shrew, except the poor fellow that has her.
What kind of provisions should always b
O given TO professional beggars The col
y shoulder.
It QUILr says there's many women stron
enough to hold fractions horse who can
hold her own tongue.
" ELoPENENr ExrRAoRDISARY.-Mr. JOne
d, dog eloped with Mr.. Smiths dinner.
1t Pompey said he once worked for a man wh
'r raised his wages SO high that be could onl
,. reach them once in tSo years.