Dayton daily empire. [volume] (Dayton [Ohio]) 1850-1865, 1860-09-10
My wife and 4.
[coNcLUDED FROM SATURDAY. ]


''They must be untold, for | never heard
of them before. If you have such an abun-
dance, wish you'd spare me enough to buy
that black silk dress you promised me so long
ago
Ii is not to be inferred from this remark
that my wife is prone to extravagance in her
tastes or habits She is unusually content with
plain aud modest attire She has never hid
den herself in the recesses of whalebone
pyramid, nor submitted to the modern spe cies
Of female cooperage for as she playfuly re
marks, "Any body can see that ] am n tub
without M being hooped." (She weighs two
hundred and one pounds avoirdupois) No
unpaid milner's bills haunt her waking hours
(nor mine) No needy dress-makers rise up
in judgment against her Herbonnet is much
too large for our youngest daughter; aged
eight years, and really seems designed for use
as well as ornament; and from my long ac-
quantaince with her, | am satisfied that she
has something in her head worth protecting,
unlike those ladies who patronize curtaied
bonnets with more ribbon than crown and more
curtain than comfort
| She fully agrees with me when / lecture our
young female friends on the extravaganza of
the age, although she contends that the men
are as much to be blamed for il as the women.
| 4
and that leads to friendly argument, from
y .ich in my own opinion, always gain the
advantage-though | must confess that j am
occasionally overborne by torrent Of words,
especially when some friendly neighbor es-
pouses my wife's side of the question. In
such cases ] beat u hasty retreat and watch
my opportunity for new attack upon the
position of the enemy under more favorable
auspices.
NY wife detests hounces (she is too stout
to wear them has no hankering after 'moire
antique, and only knows of "Honiton' by hav-
ing seen it mentioned in our daily paper To
be sure she dosent believe all the criticisms
upon the fashions which she sees in that pa
per, and she even goes so far as to say that
she has no idea that the editor himself believes
them. l think she is hardly just to the editor
"a very clever fellow by the-way who never
NEEDLES with any thing but politics, except
| Church matters, ladies dresses, and fsh-and
who never gets into trouble as long as he sticks
to the politics and fish
But to return to the black silk dress Some
years ago q don't care to remember how
many, under the influence of affection and a
delusion in regard to my financial prospect
had made rash promise to purchase such an
article for her especial use and adornment
but had coupled the promise with the impor
tant proyiso, "some time" We had previ
ously canvassed the relative merits Of calicoes
cashmeres, silks and satins, and had decided
: that one good silk dress was worth half doz
en- of any others, not only for its present pur
pose but as being more invaluable in its lattel
stages for the decoration of the young scion
n of our house, and a sly hint was thrown ou
that spare "breadth" out Of the skirt nigh
: be very useful in refacing any coat of min,
that might happen to stand in need of that op
Grafton. The ''some time before alluded Ia
has not yet arrived, and from present appear
!, ances il is as far off as when the promise we
z made Still it fingers in my wife's memory
y and she occasionally brings il to mind among
| fear, many other unfulhlled promises
In regard to the dress you may depen
y upon having it some time but the treasure
Of which was speaking are not exactly ayai
a able for that purpose at present, / replied
9. ''but can easily convince you that we ar
I, possessed of them. Are there not seven rosl
- checked cherubs (at least you call them S
when they are not in mischieD now sleepin
in happy unconsciousness Of money and il
- attendant evils, each one Of them worth h
weight in gold 2 I've heard you say so man
"a a time Now at a moderate estimate the
y will average fifty pounds a piece, Even Ca
- 1Ornla gold rs worm TWO nunureu dollars
o, pound So we have three hundred aud fifl
e. pounds of cherubs at two hundred dollars
X pound, which according to simple multiple
o ton, makes seventy thousand dollars worth
e those Heavenly bodies alone.
y. 'Nonsense, Persy"-
re "Ohl.but II isn't nonsense. There il is, f
" ured out according TO your own estimate, al
a very pretty little sum it makes TO begin Il
world with Now, my dear, what is my lo
WORTH s
This was a poser My wife looked up in
haze Of blank astonishment as her mind gra
ped the idea, and Itrembled for fear she mig
say nothing" and thus overturn; the who
ar groundwork Of my theory, But as soon
y she had swallowed the idea, aud mentally
gested il, she replied
"Why don't you ask me what the air
10. WORTH for could dispense with one as well
the other"
SSIss thanked my wife for the compliment a
: Q congratulated myself that she had drawn
10; worse comparison between my love and the a
w aud continued,