Dayton daily empire. [volume] (Dayton [Ohio]) 1850-1865, 1860-01-06

pieasurss of ssating.

EtGhhuAHapl ohNAthbs
Perhaps Brick Pomeroy local Of the MI,
waukes News, cannot give his views Of
skating, and then again perhaps he can. II
is the best pen and ink portrait Of skating
we have seea
"Rght beneath one of our windows, from
morning till midnight, we see youngsters
ceivable shapes. We can not pick Up pa
per, but an article on skating meets the
eye. Everybody says it's fun, and that's all
everybody knows about it, for we have
tried it. Last night, about gas light time,
after reading glowing description Of life on
skates, we prepared for our first attempt,
and sailed forth to join the merry crowd
We had on pair stoga boots, trowsers
legs tucked inside Robert tailed coat and
white hat. We went down on the ice, and
gave boy two shillings in good coin Of the
realm, for the use of his Implements. We
have confidence even as good as Peter e
faith. We, with the assistance Of friend,
fixed on the skates, and stood erect, like a
bvrber's pole,
Encouraged at the sight Of some ladies on
the bridge looking at the skaters, we struck
out A slant TO the right with the right
ioot--a slant to tho left with the left foot
and just then we saw something on the ice,
aud stopped over to pick itup On our leet
again-two slants to the right and one to
the left accompanied with loss Of c0nf-
dence Another stride with the right foot,
and we sat down with fearful rapidity, with
very little, if any, elegance What set
down it was, for we made dent in the ice
not unlike butter bowl Just then one Of
the Indies remarked-"Oh look, Mary that
feller with the white hat amt got his skeets
on the right place + Ditto, thought we.-
just then a ragged little devil sang out as
he passed us-"Hello, old timber legsP' and
we rose suddenly and put after him. Three
slides to the right-two to the left, and away
went our legs--one to the east and the othr
or west, causing an immense fissuro in our
pants, and another picture of butter tray in
the cold-ohl how cold-icel Then the lady
we know she was one by the remark she
made--again spoke and said--"Oh, look
Mary, that chap with white hat has sat
down on his handkerchief to keep from
taking coldl' We rose about as graceful as
a saw horse, when Mary said--"gucss faint
a handkerchief, Jane, --and Mary was
right 1t wasn't handkerehief-not a bit Of
it just then friend came along, and
profFered us his coat tail as "steadier'-
We accepted the continuation of his gar
ment, and up the river we went about ten
rods when shy to the right by the leader
caused us, the wheel horse, to shootoif on a
tangent, heels up But the ice is very cold,
this season
We tried it again a glide one way--a
glide and half the other, when "whack"
came our bump OF philoprogenitivenos on
the ice, and we saw million stars dancing
around our eyes, like ballot girls at the
Bowery theatre. How that shock went
through our system, and up and down our
spinal column. Lightning couldn't have
corkscrewed it down creased sapling with
greater speed and more exhilerating effect
Boarding house butter nor warranty deed,
could not have struck stronger than we did
and dozen ladies' looking at us--and our
"fssured' + panttl .H.
"Hello, old cock, sang out that ragged
imp again, and we there helpless Soon we
got up and made another trial, with better
success Perhaps we had skated, in our
peculiar style, fifteen feet, when blunder-
ing chap came up behind, and we sat down
with our tired head pillowed in his lap
and he swearing at US, when it was all his
own fault How cold the ice was there too!
Every spot where we made our debut on the
ice-ohl how cold it wasl Our "bear skin"
drawers were no protection at ALL W.
tried again. for the papers all say it's fun,
and down came our Roman-Grecian nose,
and the cold iulep material, and the little
drops of crimson ran down our shirt bosom,
and on to the cold ice Once more we tried
skatino--made for the shore--aat down and
counted damages.
Two shillings in cash, thrown away
Seven lateral and one "fronterap bumps
on ice One immense fssure in as hand-
some pair of ten dollar cassimeres as a
man eyer put his legs in. Four buttons
from our vest, "lragmented" watch crystal
and back-ache, big enough to divide
among the children of Israel If you catch
us on the smooth, glossy, chilly freezing
treacherous, deceitful, slippery, and slip
uppery ice again, you'll know i'll If any
one ever hears of our skating again. they
will please draw on us for the bivalves and
accompanying documents. We have got
through skating. It's humbug It's vex-
alton of spirit, of business, Of flesh, and
tearer of trowsersl It's head-bumping
back.achipg, Leg wearing, dangerous insti-
tutions, and we warn people against skating
We tried it, and shan't be able to walk for
a month. Skating clubs are humbug, and
all the rascally youngsters wish to get the la
dies at it, that they may see--if they too
don't say "the ice is dreadful cold!" It's
nothing to u.s. but the ladies will do well to
let skates alone, unless they are younger and
more elastic than we are. Oil how cold
the ice is-we can feel it yeti