Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1860-03-14
LOVE IN MARRIED LIFE.

VI Burcn and MS W1fe dt
Cnicago, on the ground Of adultery by the lat
Ter. attracts much attention on account of the
eoclal position of the parties. Mr.. Burch is a
Wea Wy merchant, and bis wife is the adopted
Iaugnter OF Erastus Corning, of Albany. They
nave been married twelve years and have two
OF ner guilt, but she now alleges that 1t was ex-
torted from hcr by violence. She has returned
to the house Of her foster parent, who has en-
ployed eminent counsel for her defence. Opin-
ions differ as to the guilt of the wife, but the
general belief at Chicago is that an improper
intimacy existed. The London Times in discus
sing the elopement of the young and rich Mrs.
Gurney with one of her servant men, attributes
her fault to the settlement of her estate upon
herself, thus leaving her Independent of her
husband. 1t states that in large number of
privately arranged separations, recorded by an
eminent London lawyer, in the space Of forty
years, in every case but one, the wife had a
provision independent Of her husband, and in
almost every case the wife was the wrong-doer
The statistics of the London lawyer may be
faithful to facts so far as they go, but they do
not touch the secret of the matter at all. If
wives having property in their own right are
more likely than others to leave their husbands
it only indicates that there are many more who
would escape the ties of matrimony if they
could, and are only held to their allegiance by
hard necessity. If so, the facts are an argument
for separate settlements for wives, rather than
should be bound where man is free
We do not know the facts, the secret unwrit-
ten history in the Burch case. In that of Mrs
Gurneyin England there was disparity of age,
and the husband, absorbed in business, left the
wife to seek such conn mpanionship as she might
What wonder that young, educated and capti-
waiting servant man, constantly about her, and
giving ner daily the graceful attentions so ac-
ceptable to tho heart of woman should have
found 1T easy to win her love. Perhaps her mar
rage had only been matter OF business and
convenience, like too many alliances in high
life, and her love for the servant was the first
awakening Of the tender passion within her.
30 the people of Manchester felt and sympa-
thised with the young lovers, guilty as they
were In the sight of law and conventional
usage. In u great many of these cases we
should blame the wives less if we knew their
secret history. 1t is their duty to ''suffer and
be strong, and many are the wives who full
fill this hard duty, whose secret sorrows the
world will never know Nay, the husband
himself Is often unconscious of the silent pain
which eats out the heart of her he loves, and
which he might remove and would if he were
aware of it. Many husband thinks that he
fulhlls all the duties Of the sacred relation, to
whom the wifo looks in vain for that intimate
sympathy and affection which every woman
requires. The life of woman's heart is love
one lnstlnctlyely Graves it, and is desOlate
without it. Respect and studied Difference
Will not answer as q substitute for it. There
must be in the real sacrament Of matrimony
tenderness of love, a fondness a mutual inter
change OF delicate and sensitive regards, which
Language fails to express, but which every
man and woman that has truly loved instinc-
lively understands and appreciates.
with too many men this manifestation of the
tender passion ends with courtship, and mar
rage brings only cold respect and fidelity
oetter Thousand times of course than unfaith-
fuiness and estrangement-but not satisfying
to the highest demands of the heart The
man, engrOssed with business, who comes to
his home chiefly for food and rest, does not feel
the need OF love like the wife, restricted to a
narrower circle Of cares and occupations. and
driven In upon her own thoughts for solace.
hat wonder that the woman thus robbed of
the affection she Graves, by him from whom it
Is due, opens her heart to tho sunshine of
anothers smile, and accepts the delicate at.
tentions from he friend, that the husband de.
MES or neglects2 What wonder if Friendship
sometimes rlpens into love- in such cases, and
the wife finds her heart completely gone from,
her husband to another before she had sus.
pected the danger? We do not believe, with
the London Times, that the fault is generally
on the part Of tho wives. The original fault
often lies with the husband. The neglect OF
the husband is often the beginning of the evil
The husband is bound not only to love but to
cherish the wife. If she is left in poverty
and desolation of heart to seek elsewhere the
love her nature requires, let not the husband
consider himself the innocent and injured
party. He may have been faithful, but he
should have been fond, and thus the love of
the eourtship and the honeymoon would have
deepened aud strengthened as the true pair
ciomb the hill thegither," and there would
have been no room there for an interloper