The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1860-02-23
SARIET


Of which sex i the Post-OEice: b: Ans-The mail
Why are swallows Ike leap head over heels :
Ans-Becausc they are a suBmcr-set (a soHeTsei.)
Why is a bel cover ike blister Ans.-Because
it, cOuuterplue (counter-pain.)
Surely some people must know themselves; they
never think about anything else.
lie j. net good he should be who does not
strive TO be better than he H.
Why wls Adams wife called Eve: Ans.-Because
when she appeared man Is day Of happiness draw
ing to a close
II i 4 beautiful custom in some Oriental lands to
leave untouched the dates that shaken from the
trees by the wind, these being regarded sacred
the poor and the stranger.
Learning j. not offensive in y woman If she only
preserves gentle and thoroughly feminine d-posi-
ton Some one has very significantly said that it
does matter how blue the stockings only the
petticoat - long enough to cover them.
Ii We were careful 10 polish our manners rs our
teeth. = make our temper sweet our breath, 10
off FUR faults pare nails, be upright
in character IN person, 70 shave cur souls to
shave our chin, what an immaculate race We should
become
If the learned Thebnus Of the oIden time had
thought u emhIlming their minds iusteli of their
bodies Il they hal committed their ueIlects to paper
instead Of their limbs TO linen and come down to us
bound in vellum instead Of being cJituel up in syca-
more, how much more perfect would have been the
Posthumous preservation
IN Indian became very much intoxicated in St
noyed y parcel of young men, he kicked two Of
them repeatedly. This led great deal Of ill-eel-
ing, AMI there would have been boodshed had not a
byst1nder called out, What else could you expect
Of EjcFapOo Indian - This raised n general
laugh, during which all traces Of -humOr vanished.
Some characters appear to superficial Observers to
be fu Of contradiction, change, and Inconsistency,
without being actually So windmill - eIernally
work % accomplish one end, although ii shifts
with every variation Of the wethercock, and
ten daerent positions in a day.
When Erskiue was in the full tide of success as a
barrister Of his fellow lawyers, wishing To
noy him. hired boy to ask him, as he going /
into Court with his green bag stuffed with briefs, if
he had any Old clothes Tor sale - No, YOU young
rascal :! said ErskiHc- ''these all Hetr SUITS
TELEGEaFH CALIGR ,ruY.--A lady at the West End .
on receiving, Few days ago. telegraphic message
from her IN the north Of England, complained Of
tie shocking hand he wrote asserting that his being
IN a hurry was no excuse ior such a scrawi-PUHch I
True modesty Is a flower whose grateful odor en-
dures for ages False m0lcsty Is weed as poison
Gus as stram0uium, and de..lly- in it, ultimate
elects. the prussc acid, distilled from the green
AMI pretty leaves Of ppach trees
Mrs Perkins says she never can understand these
ere market reports. Sine understand how cheese
be lively, and pork be active-that l. before
It j. deai-Lud feathers be dTOOpIng-thIt Is If
its raiuing-but how whisky can be steady, or hops
quiet spirits dull, she can't neither how lard
can be firm IN warm weather, nor iron unsettled
potatoes depressed, aour risjng-less there had
been yeast put into it-sometimes II wOull rise
even then
CugEHFULvEss--Try for q single day, beseech
YOU, 10 preserve yourself in an easy and cheerful
frame Of mind Be but for one day, instead Of fire.
wUrshipPer Of passion and hell, the sunwOrshIpper
Of clear seli-posse>sOn; and compare the day in
which you have rooted the weed Of dissatisfaction
with that which you have allowed it to grow up
and you ind your heart open to every good motive,
your life reng;heuel, and your breat armed with
Vlnoply against every trick Of fate-truIy you will
wonder your own HPrOyement--Rfcher.
Coon FATuEEs.-It Is n good sign and true when
you amid LITTLE group Of boys, one dart from the
rest, and tossing his above his head, shout,
% There IS my fItiers'' he to meet him.
You may be sure matter what business troubles
Sever that may have. that there a spot in his
heIrt still fresh and green, which the Of the
world have had no power TO blight - There's ay
lathe" " With what pretty pride the little fellow
shouts this ne must be, indeed, brute, whose
ttherly heart does not swell with love- whose eyes
30 gi-ten. Who does not. at such a moment. feel
amply repaid for that days toll, no matter how
wearisome- After all, Lore Is the only thing worth
having
The following sound and judicious paragraph i
from Of Mr.. Eyerett's contributions to the -Ntr
I0~5 Lefgsr.
THE PaEs--The press Of the United States i yig-
AMI eaterprisn, and reaches the hearts Of the
Community far beyOui that Of any other country 1t
Il, for good for evil, the powerful influence
that acts on the public mind-the most powerful IN
Itself, and as the channel through which most luuu-
ences act II IL could learn that opponent Is not
necessarily unPrHciplel and selfish adv cuturer,
traitor, coward bud knIve; ami that cur neigh
Eudel ourselves, j. would increase it. power;
AMI the great interests country (Which anguish
under the poison of eur party bi;terne-s) would he
Incidentally promoted
COSvEH- lTIOS.-Thc art Of conversation Is the
hnest Of the Gue arts; 1t Is rot the art Of saying much
but Of saying we'll There preaching who
talk, but listen not who speechify in private; or
go-sIPing men, who think little and still,
and yet they not c0uversIble men The real art
Of conversation consists only in expressing your
own thoughts freely, but III drawing out by eucoIr-
agemsnt the thoughts Of others You Will never be
Hked for long talking by anybody; but you are sure
70 De Hkel u, by your talking, you encourage and
stimulate others think and talk IN response your
thoughts Tie art l. natural gilt IN the main. 1t
Is not only gift Of mind but also Of temper II re-
qures cOndescens0u, indulgence, patience and many
other accomplishments, refinement rs well a. power.