The Grand Haven news. [volume] (Grand Haven, Mich.) 1858-18??, 1860-03-28
HOW JACK BECAME A DEM
OCRAT.

The most bigoted, unreasonable party
man l ever met with was Jack.
Jack was red-hot abolitionist, and
his chief pleasure seemed in making the
fact as notorious as possible. His friends
and associates, with one consent, pro-
nounced Jack bore, and his politics a
nuisance. -
One day Jack met at the house of a
friend a young lady of great personal
beauty and accomplishments. Attracted
by her loveliness and captivated by her
intelligence, he became assiduous in his
attentions, forgot for while his "princi-
ples," and without inquiring what might
be the political preferences of his lady
love, imprudently proposed, was accepted
and they were married.
The wedding was over, the guests had
departed, and the happy pair had retired
to their chamber, and were snugly en-
sconced in bod, whom Jack in the course
of q quiet conversation with his wife, un-
willingly alluded to his favorite subject,
by casually speaking Of himself as a Re-
publican. -
"What?" exclaimed his wife, turning
sharply and suddenly towards him, 4" are
you Republican,"
EYES," replied, Jack, delighted with
the idea of finding a patient listener to
his long unrcstrained oratory. ayes,
madam, am a Republican, a regular
out and outer-double dyed and twisted
in tho WOOL"
"Just double and twist yourself out
of this bed, then," interrupted his wife,
" l am Democrat, l am; l will never
sleep with man protesting the abomin,
able doctrines you dow
Jack was speechless from amazement
That the very wife of his bosom should
prove n traitor was horrible; she must be
testing. He demonstrated, but in vain;
twas no 60; she was in earnest, and the
only alternative LEFT him was a prompt
remuneration of his heresy, or separate
bed in the other room.
Jack did not hesitate. To abjure the
established doctrines of his party, to sur
render those glorious principles which had
grown with his growth and strength, to
the mere whim and caprices of woman,
was ridiculous and absurd and throwing
himself from the bed he quit the apart
ment.
A sense of insulted dignity, and firm
conviction that he was martyr to the
right cause, strengthened by his pride, re.
solved him to hold out till he forced his
wife into capituation.
In the morning she met him as if moth.
ing had happened, but whenever he ven.
tured 10 allude TO the night previous,
there was a laughing devil in her eye
which bespoke her power and extinguish-
ed all his hopes.
A second time he repaired to his lone.
ly couch, and second time he called on
his pride to support him in his struggle
which he now found was getting desper-
ate. He ventured curses not loud but
deep" on tho waywardness and caprice
of the sex in general, and his wife in par
ticular, wondered how long she would
hold out, whether she suffered as acutely
as he did, and tried hard to delude him.
self into the belief that she loved him toe
much 10 prolong the estrangement, and
would come to him in the morning, per.
haps that very night, and sue for recon
ciliation.
But then came the recollection of that
iufexiblo countenance, of that unbending
will, and of laughing and IMPLYING eye
and he felt convinced that he was hoping
against hope; and despairingly he turned
to the wall for oblivion from the wretch.
edness Of his thoughts.
The second day was repetition Of the
first. No allusion was made TO the sub
ject on either side. There was quiet
happiness and choerfulness about his wife