Mountain Democrat. [volume] (Placerville, El Dorado Co., Cal.) 1854-1860, 1860-02-25
Pleasures of Skating

the river, As merry aS lambs. Wccannot III
up paper, but an az ticle on skating" mte
the eye Everybody says it's fun, and that
all everybody knows about it, for we've trir,
it. Last night ahnut gas light time, after read
ing glowing description Of lfc on skates ",
prepared for our first attempt and sailed f,rti
to Join the merry crowd. We hal ON pair .
stoga boots, trousers legs tucked inside, rob
crt.tallcd coat and white hat. We went doWr
on the lee, and gave a boy two >hii'ingS il
good coin Of the realm, for the use Of bis i'm
plcmeutS. We had confidence even as great
rs Peters faith. We, with the aSSiStanc of Z
friend, fixed on the skates, aud stood erect like
a BARRIERS pole. Encouraged by the sight o
some ladies on the bridge who were Just then
looking at ia" skaters. We struck ont, \ Slant
to the light With the ii ht foot, a slant to the
left with tie lcft toot-and Just then We saw
something on the ice, and stopped over to pick
ii up On Our feet again two SlantS to the
right and one To the left, accompanied with "a
loss of confidence. Another stride with thu
right foot, aud We sat down with tralf ul ra.
pdity, and very little if any elegance, What
a set down it WAS, for we made dent in the
ice not unlike a Connecticut buttcr.brwl!
just then one Of the ladies remarked. "Oh,
look, Mary, that fr!rr With the white hat ala /
got his skates on the rl-ht place. Ditto,
thought We. Just then ragged little drvil
sang out, a. he gii'led past us -" Halo, old
timber legs ana we arose suddenly and put
after bin, aud away went our legs one to the
east, the other west, causing an immense lis.
sure i'll our pants, and another picture Of but.
tcr.tray in the coli-od , hoW coH ice 60
Then the laIy-wc knew she was ore by the
remark she m1de-again spoke and said, "Oh
look, Mary, thIt clap with n white hat has sat
in"n on his handkerchief t. keep iruil taking
cold. We ROSE about a. gracefully rs a saw
holse, When Mary sail. "L;uess faint a hand
kcrchici, Jlrc. and Mary was Isl,t ltwanl
"A hauIkrlclict-nDt bit of 1t. just then Il
friend came a..,Gg, aud pr"il,r,d us his coat,
TIM n, >t-,ttIiet.ltet .lt.t4tt.
nation Of his garment, and up the river wC
vent, about ten rods, when shy 10 the Iighl
by the leader, cau>ci Us, the whr,l.hor>r, t.
,coot III on Il tangent heels up, Bat the ic,
i, ry cold, this season
We uicd IT again. \ glide one way-a
glib ami "A hI.f tnc other when whack came
Our uump ct I,hipproEcIi;ivclrs On the ice
ad vt saw ii ihhioh ct starr dancing RrottHe
Us, like ballet girls at the Bowcry Ihcat,r
How that shock went through our system, am
up and down Our spinal column. Lightning
couldn't have corkscrewcd it down greasrc
>apling with greater speed or more cxhilcra
ting effect Boarding house butter nor war
raniy decd could not have struck stronger thar
We di1-and "A dozen ladies looking at us-auc
our assured pants
Halo, Old cock :" sang out that raggc,
imp again, and We there helpless. Soon ",
got up and made another trlal, with better
success. Perhaps we had STATED, in our pc
cullar style, fifteen feet, when laundering
chap came up behind, and We sat down VIII
our tired heal pi!owcd in his lap--and h,
swearing at us, when it was all his fault -
How cold the ice was there, too. Every >po
where We made our debut on the ice; oil, how
cold it was. Our bcar-skin drawers were II,
protection at all. We tried again, for the pa
pcrs all say is fun, and down came our 10
manGrcran nose on the cod julcp material
and the little drops Of crimson ran down ou
shirt bosom, and on to the cold ice.
Once more We tried skating for thu
shore - sat down aud counted damages. TWt
shillings in cash thrown away. Seven latrra
and one ironteral' bumps on ice One i'm
menSe tiSsurc in as handsome pair of ten dol
lar caS>imrrcs rs man ever put his legs in
One rupture in the knee, extending to th
bone. Four buttons from our vest, "iiag
mented" watchcrystal and a back.ache hi.
enough to divide among the children uf Israel
If You catch us on the smooth. CLASSY, chill
ing, freezing, trcacherous, drcciliu, Siippril
ice again, youll know it, If any one eve
hears of our skating again, they will pleas
draw on us at sight for the bivavrS and ac
companyinS documents. We have got through
skating. 1t is a humbug. 1t is vrXatlon t.
spirit, Of business, Of flesh, and tearcr Vi truw
Scrs Its "A hrad.bumping, back aching, leg
wcarying institution, and we warn pcop,
against skating. We tiled it, aud shan't b,
able to walk for n month. Skating cluhS ar,
humhugs, and all the raScally youngsters wsI
is to get the ladics'at it, that they may see
if they, too, don't say, 1.-THE ice is drradfulll
cold It's nothing To us, but the ladies' vi,
do as well to let skates alone, unless they ar,
younger and more elastic than we are. Cgh
now cold the ice is-wc can icel it yet
There are seven reasons why farmers ar,
healthier than professional men, viz:
!. They work more and develop all the lead
ing muscles of the body.
=. They take exercise in the open air ant
breathe greater amount Of oxygen.
3. Their food and drinks are commonly les,
adultrrated and far more simple.
i. They do not 0vcr.work their brain q.
much as professional men.
3. They take their sleep commonly during
the hours of darkness, and do not try to turf
day into night
d. They are not so ambitious and conSe
qucntly do not wear themselves out so rapidly
IN the contest Of rivalry.
:. Their pleasures are simple and less ex
hausting.
Down East resides certain minister. One
very cold night he was aroused from his Stun
bcrs by very loud knocking ut the door,
After some hesitation he went to the window
and asked.
"Who's there :"
a friend"
"What do you want"
TO stay here all night"
We'll, stay there, then, was the benevo.
lent reply.
An absent minded lawyer sat down to write
a deed, and began it
Know one woman" when his clerk mme-
diatcy interrupted him with,
You are wrong, sir, you arc wrong; it
should be, tx now all men,"
"Well, never mind" retorted the old crab,
If one woman knows it, all men will soon
know it"
An IIishnan and Frcnchman were to BE-
hanged together. The latter was strongly af.
fected by his situation, while Paddy took it
very easy, and told his companion to keep up
his spirits, for it was nothing at all to be
hanged.