Mountain Democrat. [volume] (Placerville, El Dorado Co., Cal.) 1854-1860, 1860-05-12
NUMBER o.
AN ADvrnruRD IN THE cans.

There were nVe OF uS-yes, HVe 4S nappy
fellows as were ever let loose from college.
1t was vacation, and we concluded TO take
trip to the falls. We got aboard Of the cars
at N, and were soon travelling very rap.
idly toward our destination.
We had Just seated ourselves and prepared
for n comfortable smoke, when in came the
conductor, and who should 1t be but our old
friend b. After the common aalutatiOns-
" low are you, old fellow :" &C., had passed,
Fred said he had some business for US to at.
tend to.
"Out with it, old chun," said We, "anv.
thing at oil will be acceptable, so letus have it,"
"Wel boys" said Fred, in very conf
Dental tOne in the next car there is as low.
ing pair as it was ever my lot TO see. They
are going down to II to get married, and
now if you can have any fun over it, just pitch
in. They must he cared for, and don't know
who can do it better than you"
IN mUmpnt,, Fred was gone, and VIC sat
our heads together to form a plan for taking
care Of the lovers
IL have it boys" said Bill Sewers; eve
must make that girl think that her lover is
married."
That's it, Bill-tlat's it," said We, not
giving him time to finish his sentence.
THAT he is married man and the father
Of children" said BILL
That's the game, boys; now let us play it."
It devOlved upon inc to commence opera
tions. Accordingly entered the car in which
We were informed the iuvcrs were. The girl,
thinking, | suppose, that she must give her
lover all the seat, had taken n scat on his kec;
and he, for the purpose Of protecting her, Of
course, had thrown his arm around her waist
and 40 they sat, in real, soft loving style.
All this gathered at glance. Stepping
up to them, | said:
"Why. Jones, what in the deuce are you
doing with this girl ?"
The girl arose hastily and seated herself on
the seat.
$780," See here, stanger," said tho fslIoW, !" you
arc mite mistaken; my name amt Jones'"
"Why, Jones :" said !, "yOu certainly
have not left your wife and children, and tried
to palm yourself off for single man, have
yOu?"
81 tell you my name aint Jones it's ITar-
per. ltncver was Jones tain't goin' to be,
nuther."
merely shook my head, and passed on to
another seat, to see the rest Of the fun. The
girl looked "wild" after | sat down but
Jones, Glids Harper, soon convinced her that
was mistaken.
About the time they got to feeling quito
well again, in came Elliott Gregg. Walking
up to Harper, he accosted him with:
"Why, Jones, you here? How did you
leave your wife and babies Y"
"NOw, see here, stranger, you aint the fust
man that's called me Jones O-day, an reckon
! must look awfully like him; but l aint
Jones, and morn that, you must call me
Jones. haven't got wife nor babies either;
but there ere gal an me is agOin' to splice, an
then you can talk about my wife, and
wouldn't wonder but what, in the course Of
time, you might talk about the babies, too !;
but you mustn't call me Jones"
This retort brought forth vOciierous laugh
ter from the spectators and it also brought
bushes to the face Of the gal that was agoin'
to be spliced.
"Ah, Jones, said Gregg, "yOu will regret
this in the future. pity your wife and chill
drcn, and this poor girl.'
SO, Mr.. Harper, your real name is Jones,
is it, and you've been fOOlin' me, have you
Well, we amt spliced yet, and don't think
we will be soon" said the girl, and her eyes
fairly flashed fire.
"Janc, jane" said Harper, don't you
know TIN Bill Harper? Thar aint drop of
Jones blood in me, and I'll prove it,"
At this moment jeff jackson, Bill Sewers
and Jim Byers entered, and of course their
attention was called to Harper, by his loud
talking. They stepped up to him, and said !:
why, Jones, what is all this fuss about ?"
This was more than Harper could stand
lie leaped upon seat.
Nov" said he, my name aint Jones, an
| can lick the fellow that says 1t is"
by this time we had got to Il, and our
friend Fred. came into the car and made Har.
per keep quiet The girl that wouldn't be
"spliced" requested Fred. to help her on the
train that was going back to N, which
he did, and the notorious Jones, GLias Harper,
followed her. We learned afterwards that he
proved himself to be Bill Harper instead Of
Bill Jones, and he and his gal got "spliced"