The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1860-05-12
Written expressly for the Richmond Dispatch
X Is S Z s.
ny "MozIs DDUM 8 >

KIS S + s.
BY "MozIs ADDUMs.'
For three. q uarters of an hour have been
thinking about buying me slate. want to
cvpher mp all the kisses ever had IN my me-
Paper won't do; want q slate; large slate,
with q handsome frame to 1t a smooth slate,
and a soft pencil without any grit in it;
pencil that a school girl could eat up entirely,
and couldn't help from eating. With that
slate and that pencil. think In less than
month could figure out the calculation to an
exactity But, as l haven't any slate, will
guess at the answer, and prove it rs soon as
ret a slate. which will be to.morrow-no, to-
Soon in the morning, will buy the biggest
slate in town, and then you won't hear any
more of me until the middle of June. Come
omy Office at that time, and you shall see the
a black board wouldn't be better than slate
have seen black. boards as large as the side of
a small house. But black-boards are expen-
ihink about the chalk Upon the whole,
think will sick to the slate:
Curious! how this idea of writing about
kisses, got into my noddle. Reckon IT'S be-
cause haven't had any for so long. 1t has
been years-years on years. Think OF ia
live man, with a fine, strong mouth, always
hungry for kisses, going for years and years
a sin and a shame. won't stand i'll can't
stand it. shall die before the week Is over,
if don't get one-a real ripe good, long, quiet,
sweet one. I'll 60 and kiss myself in the glass.
But STOP that won't pay; at least judge it
won't l am afraid to try it. All! poor me
l sadly fear l am doomed to 60 the balance OF
nay days without drop. morsel OF what. In
happier years, was my daily diet. Poor, poor,
moor fellow! am SO sorry, SO very sorry for
YOU, The best thing you can do 10 to turn
round and kiss all the way back to the first
kiss you ever had. Memory.kisssing is rather
In my time, must have had at least mil
lion of kisses, not counting the near.kin kisses,
which everybody knows ought not to be count
ed because nobody ever remembers them
They don't live half a day. The other kind
do. Some of them live forever. l have had
two which shall remember through all eter-
nifty. Tell you about on ,t them 9I presently
have had fully q million OF kisses-may be
more. but a million, certain-and OF the very
best that mortal man ever had. You wouldn't
believe it to look at me but it's a fact. On my
Instead Of kissing backwards, reckon 1
had. better begin at the beginning. 1t is the
most natural way. and enables you to preserve
the chronological order more accurately.
Let me see-where was the first kiss l ever
had, and who gave it to me! Was it that little
wheelwright's daughter went to school with
in Cumberland! No: I walked home with
her one evening for the express purpose, but
when we got to the woods, in which bad de-
termined to take the kiss, my courage failed
me. didn't kiss her that time, nor any other
time. AS was only six years old, then, and
she about the same age, l rather think don't
regret it.
Let me see. Where ,cas the first one!
All! now / remember it perfectly.
We were all spending the Christmas at Mr..
Musgrove's. l was a little over ten years old.
One evening we went to a neighbours, about a
playing "thimble,' - and was ordered to kiss
Miss Harriet Anthony, rosy checked girl of
thirteen, or Whereabouts. did it remarkably
well for a boy OF my age, and she stood ii
- Ia faA1 and hot
kiss did but, if my memory serves me, it was
not a number one kiss. 1 attribute its defec-
tiyeness to the fact that the young lady after
wards exhibited decided taste for historical
reading. Young men, make a note of this.
Girls fond of history don't kiss very we'll.
The generalization may be hasty, but it is my
duty TO put you on your guard
two years, l think. That kiss took by vio-
lence-stormed it, in thus wise, as friend of
mine would say: was passing the evening
at my aunts, and enjoying the company OF
herself and her adopted daughter-whose
name was Charlotte, if you please-when in
comes Miss Clara Thompson, who, after sit
ting an hour or more, insisted that Cnarlotte
should 90 home and stay all night with her.
NV aunt gave her consent, and OFT we started,
playing escort TO the two young ladies. The
distance was short, and the night was very
dark: Just as we got opposite certain gate
I'll show you that gate some Of these days-l
threw my arms around Charlotte and gave
her a terrific kiss. 1t was the quickest and
sort Of an amatory improvisation which little
boy .devils are prone to commit. 'GoOd gra-
cious!" said Charlotte, furriedly, to Clara, ~
believe he will eat me up" But I just went
trembling on with them, saying never word
until bid them "good night"
Not long after this got another kiss. No;
wait, hang me if 1t wasn't three years before
got another. was fifteen years old, and you
know that q kiss ut fifteen is something both
ways. l had been in love ever since was
nine, with a sweetheart year older than
myself; had been the most constant Of lovers,
and had received no reward for my fancy
except the frank admission Of my sweetheart
that she was in love with somebody else. But
it was not decreed that my affection should BE-
altogether unreQ uite0. 1t was summer time,
in the country; After supper the boys and
passage, large, airy one, and sat there talk
ing. inumated d desire to have my head
eomhsd-a luxury 70 which am passionatsly
devoted. MY sweetheart-she was q tall girl,
and ner name was Wilhelmina-saids she would
COMP u Tor me- So they sent for the comb aud
r rsSsn, ana got little cricket and sat on it,
1t was mighty good. loved her more and
more every time the comb went through NV
mar. As everybody seemed too busy 10 pay
pSs mu END = on INV ys1.o5sd very timaly.
She said nothing, and I said nothing. Thai
kept On talking and the next thing nv arm
gave little pull--the faintcst nos.issa an9 Z
down came the fair head, And-not = so1rA Msa
neaI0. T0oy kept ON talking, but cOuld not
stand II. That noiseless kiss was 90 nrecio.ss
70 me that had 70 get up and 60 away ofr from
everybody and think about Il. dare ssv i
might have gotten good many more kissss /,
had tried, but You zee was young then. nd
wasn't used TO them. One filed me up De
sides, neyerdid believe In imposing upon gen
erOsity. Wilhelmina's kiss kept me In dream
ali the next day. Only one other kiss did
ever get from her, although my fidelity 70 be-
was proof against the trials aud troubles Q
more than eight years, and, In fact never dit
quite give her up until she went aud mxrriss
d husmnd. The last kiss was given late q
night, after party. and In the presence Of tw,
or three people. Msm.-Public kissing don
pay. Set that down.
About this time-ths date OF Wtlhelmina'i
last ktss-I became intimate with Mamie
6mfth-a little round, white. breasted duck o.
= creatore, In the coQustte tine. tiSsod heI
cOastderebly-ssyi 1860 tlmss. Paid her visit
OncA, au6 sfeyed asArly . Week ~ M fstker'l
housab n 4ptng myself on the staiY.steps. a ~
orchard, ard In tie weeds. took Oso ahoui
snn.doWn On ths side Of 10 hill. neAf 8 tAickel
OF esnpe yipee. She bad beep eettae black haVs
and e1jn0 nsptns, bat SOMEHOW, thAt kt1s 70.
duead 0Oge Inpeasi0n 90 ~ tAan any ofher
Also, akelt tkis ps1od, Iesms y - teow:
sAos II T0ir AFtaat~e eessn and ubssaa