Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1860-02-09
aDit anA Hnmnr.

Tas IRIHSAN AND THs 3ULI..-An irish.
man was going along the road, when an an.
CRY bull rushed down upon him. and With
his horns tossed him over fence. Tho Ir-
ishman recovering from his fall, upon look
ing up saw the bull paving and tearing ep
the ground, las is the custom of the animsli
whereupon Pat, smiling at lin said: IF it
was not for your bowng and scraping, and
your humble apologies, you brute, baist !
would think that you had thrown me ovee
this fence on purpose!'
The man that doth no paper take,
Grudgng twelve shillngs once year,
Will never good husband make,
Because his wife will never know What
is going on in the world, and his
children viii very Ignorant grow.
The last line is rather two long for good
Jingle, but the moral is sublime. -'.' --4-- -
An athletic specimen Of man from tho
Emerald Isle called at the counting-hoIso Of
ore of our river side merchants, and there
took off lis bat to make his best bow. "The
top of the morning to ye, mister" snys Pat;
"I've been told ye are in want Of help
I've but little to do" replied the go1itis-
man with mercantile gravity.
"Then I'm the boy for ye's,' says Paddy.
its but little l care about doin'-shure its,
the money I'm afther."
The Duke of Wellington giving orders one
day during the Pcninsular campaign, for a
battalion to attempt rather dangerous en-
terprise--tbe storming of one Of the onemy'A
batteries Of Sebastian-complilnented the Of
fcer by saying that his regiment was the first
in this world "Yes," replied the officer :,
leading on his men, ''and before your lord
ships orders are finally executed, it will prob
ably be the first in the next"
Mike came into the sanctum the other day
with vory knowing look, His ti!st salutoH
Why is tie Grca. Eastera like an Irish
girl7
| We Of course gavo 1t mp.
| Because said Mike, ono is the Maid Of Er'n
and the other is made Of iron'
| He left Immediately.
! A friend of mine told lie lie once overheard
two fashioraJie-Iookin girls just como from
some great school say to one another. on 500
ing boat approach tire ship at Calcutta.
containing two yellow-looking ordinary peo-
pie, "Who are those old quizzes? What an
antcduvian couple" When to their hor-
ror and dismay, the despiscd couple claimed
the gay young ladies as their own children
A medical student joinel, without invita-
ton, party dining vt at inn. after dinner,
le boasted so much Of his abilities, that one
of the party said, "You have told US enough
of what yon can do; tell us something you
can't DO. - Faith" said he. 81 cannot pay
my share Of reckoning" ..
A man was taken up f3r stealing sou,s
valuable fancy ducks and after description
Of them the prisoners attorney said:
"why, they can't he such rare breed.
for have some Of them in my own Yard
Every likely" said the complaint, Il have
los. good many lately"
| Ton, --"Don't you think como verses
would touch her, Charey-a beautiful pofnrc''
Charley--"Oh, hang your verses, Tom. If
you want to cni,y life, drop poetry and tho
gals altogether and jine fire company
Captain, what's the fare to st. Louis?"
"What part Of the boat do you wish to So
on, cabin or deck?'
"Ilang your cabn' said the gentleman
from Indiana, 4 live in cat'a Ht lomc; give
me the bcs: you've got