Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1860-10-19
Artemas Ward Sees tho
Prince of Wales.

Prince, tho it cum purity mere eostin me
my vaerablc life. | cawt u glimpse oi
him as he sot OF the Pizaro of the hotc
in Sarnia, and clbodc my way through a
crowd of woman, children, sojers and In
juns that was hangin round the tavern
| was drawin mere to the Prince when a
red faced man in milingtary close grab.
bed holt of me and asked me where | was
goin all so bold.
"To see Albert Edward, Prince Of
Wales" sez |. "Who be yu?"
He said he was Kurnal Of the Seventy
Fust Rigcmcnt her Majcsty's troops. |
tolcd him | hopcdthe Seventy Onesters
was in good health, and was passin hi
when he kechcd holt of me agin and said
in a tone Of indignant cirprise:
What! Impossible! 1t cannot be !!
Blarst my hisc, sir, did | understand you
to sa that yu was actooly going into the
presents of his royal lncs?"
That's what's the matter with me-"
replied.
But blarst my hisc sir, it's onprcssy-
dcnted. It's orfu, sir; nothn like it
ante happcnd sins the gunpowder plot Of
Guy Forkcs. Owdoshus man, who air
you "
Sir>" scz I, drauin myself up and
putin on a defiant air, Pm a America
sitturzin My name is Ward I'm a
hnsban and the father Of twins, which
I'm happy to state they look Ike me.
BY purlcshun I'm a exhibitor of wax
work Il slch."
"Good God yield the kurnal," the
idea of a exhibitor of wax tigurs goin
into the presents of Royalty! The Brit
ish lion may well roar at the thawt. "
Scz [, i" Spcakin Of the British Lion,
kurnal, Idc like to make a bargain with
yu fur that tharc bestc fur n lu wcaks tn
add to my show | didn mean nothin
by this. | was only gittin orr a COAX but
yu ortcr hev scne the old kurual gump
up and howl. lie actooly foncd at the
mowth.
This carnt bee real !" he showtcd.-
" No, no. Its orrid dream Sir, yu
are not humun bcin, yu hey no eXistcns
-yure myth y
Wall" scz I, old hoss, yull find me
ruthcr onkumftablc Myth cf yc puntch
my inards in that way agin." | begun
to cit little rilcd, fur when he called
me a myth he puntchcd me purity hard.
The kurnal now kommenst showtin for
the Seventy Onestcrs. | ut fust thawt
ldc stay and bckum Marter to British
Outraic, as sieh course mite git my
name upp an be good advertisement fur
mi show, but it occurred to me that CT
any OF the Seventy 0nesters should hap
pen to insert baronet intu my stummik
it mite be onpleasunt an was on the
pint of runnin orf when the Prince his
s,lf kum up an axel me wot the matter
was Sez " Albert Edward,is this yu?"
q he smild 4 sed it was Sez | Albert
Edward, heres mi keerd. | cum to pay
my rcSpecks to the futur King NV lng!an.
The kurnal of the Seventy onesters hear
is ruther smawl pcrtaters, but of coorS
WI aint tn blame fur that. lie put on as
many airs as cf he was the Bully Boy
with the glass eye
Never mind" sez Albert Edward.
I'm glad to see you, Mister Ward, at all
events, and he tux my hand so pleasant
like Il larfcl so sweet, that [ fel i'll luv
with him at oncct He handid me Sc
gar 4 we sot down on the Pizaro & kom-
menst smokin rite cheerful.
Wall,n scz |, Albert Elard, how :
the old folks ?"
Her Majesty and the Prince are
we'll" he sed.
" Duz the old man take his Lager beer
rc!clcr? enquircd.
The Prince Iarlcl AMI intcrmatcd that
the old man dident let menny kags of
that beyrig spilc in the sullcr in the
coarse of a ycrc. We sot and tawkt
tharc some time bout matters and things,
and himcbi axcl him how he liked b.
in Prince as iinrs he'd got.
"Tu spcck plane, Mr.. Ward he sed,
Il don't mutch like it. I'm sick of all
this bowin 4 craulin Il hu.rlrin over Il
boy like me.
| wood ruthcr 90 threw the kountry
quietly Il cngoy miself in mi own Wa,
with the other boys, and not be made a
Show Of to bee garpcd at hi eyrybodly.
When the pcplc cheer me I fcal plezeA
for kno they mean it, but cf these |
ho,S off ,huls Good know how see thru
uWl their moves x understan exactly
what they air after, and node how | larl:
ed at en- in private they'd stop kisin mi
hand, and iawnin over me as they du
now. Bat yu kno Mister Ward | earnt
help bein a Prince, aud must du all
ken tn fit miseIf for the pcrsishun | must
sumtimc ockcp.
That's troo, siknes an the doctors VI
carry the queen orf one of thccs dasc
shoors yu live" Scd |.
The time havin aroye fur me to take
mi dcpartcr, riz up AMI scd, Albert
Elard, | mus 90, but preevcus to DUN Sc
will observe that yu SCOT me. lurc a
good fcllcr, Albert Eiard, q tho lmc
asn Princes as a einral thing, | must s1
| like the cut of yurc glib. When yu glt
tn bee King tri Il bee as good man a
yuro mothers ben. BE just and bee jim
rus, cspcshiolly to Snowman, who hey all
ers bcea aboozed sens the dase Of Noah
who was the fIst man to 60 into the Men
ag.ry bizincss, 4 eff the daily papers oi
his time air to bee believed Noahs col
lccshun NV liyin wild beests beat emmy
thing ever seen sense, tho make bold tC
ldowt eff his snaiks was ahed NV mine. Al
hort El,r1 adool" | Tux his hand