The Placer herald., 1860-10-27
The Delights of being Newspaper COL
lectOr.

| AAO SAt0 Va UCAA6 q ANVWoPopCA OOA-
lector.
| Some felow-a collector for South Caro-
lima paper, and other periodicals-latcly
threw up his commission, and sent back the
unpaid accounts with "notes," which the
spirit happened to lay hold on, and they
were presented in tangible shape to the
world. As they are living pictures, met with
here or elsewhere, we make extracts. The
collector says:
Editor Herald of IruM-Sir:-Y fur
nished me, as you recollect, with list of
one hundred and seventeen owing subscrib-
ers. have called upon one hundred and
four of them, and have the honor of paying
over to your order three dollars and twelve
and one half cents, being the amount to
which you are entitled. | return you the
list numbered from one to one hundred and
sixteen, and now give reply to each:
No. lis minister. He says in the first
place he never got one-half Of the numbers,
ia lie according to the account Of the post
mastery and in the next place your jokers
column was too scurrilous. Besides, he
knows by the tone of your editorials that
you drink. He wants nothing more to do
with you-never wants to Hear from you
again.
No. 2-ls in Jail for debt. He has not
seen half dollar for year. Says he would
pay with the utmost cheerfulness, if he had
the money, but had to borrow shirt to put
on last Sunday. Admires your paper won
derfuIly, and hopes you will continue sending
it to him. He wishes you to take bold
stand in favor of the abolition Of imprson-
ment for debt, as he thinks it would be a
very popular move with gentlemen in his
situation Sends his best respects.
No. SIS a young doctor. Says your
paper is beneath the notice of a gentleman.
Wouldn't give d--n for cart load. Says
you inserted an article rejecting on the pro
tession. Only wishes he could catch you
here-wouId make you smell HI. Is going
to persuade everybody that takes your paper
to stop it. Cursed your bill, and says you
may get it the best way you can.
No. As an old maid. Says you are al
ways making a fling at single ladies of an
uncertain age. Wouldn't pay you if she
was rolling in wealth, and hadn't cash enough
to buy crust of bread. Sent all the papers
she had back month ago, and says now tina,
she has sent them back, she don't owe you
anything. Says she is even with you, and
intends to keep so until the day of judgment.
No. SIS a gambler Says he got com
pletely cleaned out last week at the races.
Couldn't accommodate his grandmother with
half dime if she was starving Likes your
paper tolerablv-would like it better if you
published more races, and would occasionally
give an account of a cock fight. Hopes you
won't think hard Of him for not paying you
now, but has a prospect of soon having
some loose change, as he is after II rich young
greenhorn, who arrived last week. Will
pay your bill out of the pluckings.
No. G-Is an old drunkard Hasn't got
anylh 'ng and never expects to have. Gath
cred up all the papers he had and sold them
for half pint of rum to the groce y keeper,
to wrap groceries in
No. = Is a magistrate. Swore he never
owed me cent, and told me was a low
rascal for trying to swindle him in such a
bare faced manner Advised me to make
tracks in a little less than no time, or he
would get out a warrant against me, as
common cheat, and have me sent to prison.
Is by all odds the meanest man have seen
yet Never will 90 near him again.
No.. SIS u policeman. Says that al
though you profess to publish neutral paper
it is not so Thinks he has seen considera-
BILE squirting towards the side he is opposed
to.
The collector concludes with "accept my
resignation, and strike me from the list of
agents. | have been called q swindler, ras-
cal, villain, blood sucker. These are scme
of the names they think roper 20 bestow
upon me- | tried fighting while, and
thrashed some of your patrons like bazes,
occasionally got licked like thunder myself