davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

herself? Doth she never think of these here
things?"
"Not bein natral born fool" sed i by this
time little riled, 81 can safely say that she
duthent"
"Oh, whot-whot," screamed the femail a
swingin her umbreller in the air, "oh what is
the price that woman pays for her expert
ens?"
Il don no, marm," seq i, "the price of ad-
mission to my show is Is sents per individ-
ooul."
"& cant our society go in free ?" asked the
femail.
"Not ifi know about it," sed in harsh
tone.
"Crooil, crooil man," she cride and bust in
to teefs.
"Wont you let my darter in ?" sed another
of the xsentrick wimin takin me atfectionate-
ly by the hand, "oh, pleese let my deer dar-
ter in. Shoes sweet and gushin child of
natur."
LET her gush," roared i, as mad as Good
stick to at their tarnal noncents, ''let her
gush."
Whereupon they all sprung back with the
simultaneous observation that was great
beest.
"My femail friends" sed i, "be4 you leeve
i've few remarks to make, way them we'll.
The femail woman is of the greatest :nsti-
tooshuns of which this lane kin boste. 1t is
impossible to git along without her. Had
there been no fenail women in the wurld
shood skarcely be here with my unparalleled
show on this very awspishus occashun. She
is good i: sickness-good in wellness-good
at all time. She is a good thing to have in
the house. Oh, woman, woman cride,
my feelins wurked up to high poetick pitch
"you air an angel when you behave yourself
but when you take off your proper apparel &
(mettyforically speekin) yit into pantyloons
when YOU desart your fresides and with
your heds full Of wimmin's rights noshuns 60
around like roarn lyons seekin whom they
may devour sumbuddy-in short when you
undertake to play the man, YOU play the dev-
Vie and air an emfatic nusans My female
frends," continued, as tina was Indignantly
departin, "way we'll what Artemas Ward has
sed."
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
Gtneral Misffllanu.
Scene in the Life of q Snowman.
EY ARTEMAS WARD.

A Snowman meets with strange sites. He
sees human natur as she are, unmasked and
without no close on, q he must be stoopeder
or ded kab hoss if he duzzent stock his
branes with several kinds of yousful mol
lig.
The undersigned won't boste. Ime A.
merican sitterzen. go in for the tast-salin
snug built 4 full-manned skeuner United
States, which runs herself, she duz, & on
whose decks man is as good as another
man, and frequently moore SO if he conducts
himself strate. TO use a Snakespeerian
fraze, ime native l. to the manner born, and
don't want to put on airs simply becawse i've
met with CRATE suckcess on the show perfes-
shun (Which i've bin into going on % yeers.)
My worthy progentors was unable to give
mt cussical eddyca,ion, & all nose pickt
up
Gas saed as sailed"
to kote from Captain Il. Kidd, the celebrated
pirut But thank hevin my sire and stress
gave ME good naim, and pint with fealins
of pride and pleshure to the fack that nun OF
our famery was ever in Congress or in the
New York perlice, or Arms Howse Guv-
ner.
The ensooin seen in my checkered kareer
is respectfully submitted to discrimiratin
publick
wIMMINs RITES.
pitcht my tent in small town in 1njan
ny one day last seeson, and while was stan
din at the door takin mummy a deppysitior
of ladies cum up and sea tina war members
of the Buncumyill Femail Moral Reform ant
Wimn,ins Rites Associashun and axed me i
tha kood 20 in withcwt pain the admisshur
fee.
Not egzackly," sez i, "but you cen pa.
without goin in."
"Do YOU no hoo we are ?" sed one of tn
wimmin, tall and feroshus lookin creeter
with blew cotton umbreler under her arm
-"air YOU konshus as to who and what VI
) air ."
My impreshun is" sed i, "from kursor
VI, that you air females"
I'VE air sur" sed the feroshus woman
"wc belong to society that believes wimi
has rites-whieh believes in raisin her to he
proper speer- which believes that she is er
dowed with as much intelleck as man is
which believes she is trampled on and aboo
u ed-& which will resist hence4th and 4eve
the encroachments of prowd and domineeri
man."
!" Durin her discorse the xentrick femail too
me by the koat-coller and swung her umbre
- ler over my he'd
Il hope, marm," sez startin back, 9TH
YOUR intenshuns is onorable. 1me lone ma
~ here in strange plais, besides i've wife
hum"
~ "Yes," cride the femail, "& she's s-l.a-v-
n Doth she ever dream of freedom-doth 81
IN never think of THROWN off the yoke of tyra
ny aud thinkin and speakin and votin f
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
A COntentcd Farmer.

Once upon time Frederick, King of
Prussia, surnamed "Old Fritz" took a ride
and espied an old farmer plowinS his acre
by the wayside, and cheerily singing his mel
ody.
You must be we'll of, old nam, said the
king, Does this acre belong to YOU, on which
you labor:?'
NO SIR replied the farmer, who knew not
that it was the king, i am not SO rich as that,
l plow for wages.
How much do you get q day. asked the
king.
Eight groschen,' (about twenty cents) said
the farmer.
This is not much said the king, can you
get along with this p
Get along, and have little something
left
How is that y
The farmer smiled and said:
We'll, if must tell you, two groschen are
for myself and wife, two l pay my old debts
two lend away, and two l give for the
Lords sake
This is mystery which l cannot solve,
replied the king.
Then l will solve it for you,' said the far
mer.
| 4 have two old parents at home, who KEEP,
me when was weak and needed help, ant
now that they are weak and need help,l keel
them. This is my debt, toward which ! pa!
two groschen day. The third pair of gros
chen, which lend away. spend for my chill
dre6, that they may receive Christian instruc
ton. This will come handy to me and m.
wife when we get old. With the last tw'
groschen maintain two sick sisters, whom
would not be compelled to keep--this Civ
for the Lords sake
The king, well pleased with his answe,
said:
'Bravely spoken, old man. Now will al
so give you something to guess. Have yo
ever seen me before?'
Never said the farmer.
In less than FIVE minutes you shall see m
fifty times, and carry in your pocket fifty o.
my Ekenesses.'
This is riddle that l cannot unravel
said the farmer.
Then will do it for you,' replied tn
king.
Thrusting his hand into his pocket, an
counting him fifty bran new gold pieces in'
his hand, stamped with his royal likeness,
said to the astonished farmer who knew n,
wha: was coming,
The coin is genuine for it also comes fro
our Lord God, and l am his paymaster.
now bid you u.'-Gerndn Reformed Nc
u senger.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

BABYis EoUIPPAGE-A large eheese-box
upon castors, with pillow for cushion, ;
knotted rope put through two holes in front,
for reins, and brother Charlie for horse.
How little it takes to satisfy our infant am
bition!
We owe to baby's grandmother this won
drous invention, which we hasten to publish
for the benefit of the juvenile race, whose pa
rents can SO easily supply them with the
means of iocomotion.-Lady's Wreath.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
The Oil Wells of Pennsylvania.
Correspondence of the Tribune.

Correspondence OF the tribune.
The oldest well. leased from the Pennsyl-
vania Rock Oil Company by the Seneca Oil
Company, is doing regular business of 500
gallons of pure oil per day. Col. Drake is
sinking another we'll in the immediate vicini-
ty Of the former with every prospect of sue.
cess.
One mile below, Crossley & Co. had found
abundance Of oil, but are not barreling any
at present. A few rods below Stackpole &
Fletcher have found in addition to a fine
show Of oil, a very strong salt we'll, making
two ounces of salt to gallon Of water. The
oil is Of no disadvantage to the salt water. a.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

t. The professor" in his "story" in the
Atlantic, gets off his usual amount of good
things. Here is one of them: Il have great
confidence in young men who believe in
themselves, and are accustomed to rely on
their own resources from an early period
When resolute young fellow steps up to
the great bully, the World, and takes him
boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to
find it come off in his hand, and that it was
only tied on to scare away timid adventur-
ers."
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
For the CaledOnian.
For the Ca!edonian.
Merry Manifestations of Mental Musings

Merry Manifestations of Mental Musings.
In looking over the musty records of one
of the oldest towns in n. H., not many miles
from "old No. Four" was recently found the
following expression Of statistical interest,
seemingly drawn from straightforward cit
izen, upon being importuned by the authori-
ties concerning his taxable property:
"lnto your list l give my poll,
With one red COW that's six years old,
With one small house and acre Of land,
The soil of which is filled with sand,
"Six dung hill fowls and one old cat,
Which clears the house of every rat;
One sow-pig ard fifteen sheep,
Which jump SO bad I'm plagued to keep.
my loving wife, it's known full we'll,
She works like sin. and scolds like HI.
Three Toys. two girls. so smart you'll find
They are a comfort to my mind.
That's all I've got, have no more,
This eighteen hundred thirty-four.
To you dear sir. my list bring.
And subscribe myself
ELISHA FLING"
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
Selffted 2oetru.
The Three Angels.

me lhfee Angels.
BY EMELINE SHERMAN SMITH,
In the starry bowers of heaven
Three bright angels once had birth,
And to each were duly given
Missions to fulfil on earth.
Charged with many gentle duty
Charged with words of hottest cheer,
Came these shapes of Eden beauty
Down to bless the dwellers here.
That was in the newborn ages
That was long. and long ago,
Ere the worlds frcSh-wri,ten pages
Records bore Of sin and woe.
Since that time all things have altered
Dark hath grown life's devious way;
Weary pilgrims there have faltered;
HapleSs ones have gone astray.
Yet these messengers most holy,
Faithful to their early trust.
Still have soothed the melancholy
Raised the fallen from the dust.
One. with aspect calm and tender.
Oft hath cheered the parting soul
Pointed to a realm of splendor.
Whispered that should be its goal.
One. from out the clouds of sorrow,
Still hath looked with smiling eyes
Eyes that arched each dreaner's $ morrow
With bow OF radiant dyes.
One. with tear-drcps gently falling
Der face diyinely fair.
And voice Of pity. calling
10 the wretched, everywherc-
Still hath fed and clothed the needy:
Soothed the sick and cheered the sad
Lightened task for those awcary;
Made cen erring spirits glad.
Tirelcss angels yet they're smiling
AS they've smiled Cor countless years.
Poor Humanity beguiling
Of its cares, and doubts. and fears.
Angels. loved of Mans Redeemer.
keverently their names call
Faith, the seraph-Hope, the dreamer
Charity, most bless'd Of ALL
While upon this earth we find them,
Life is not doom Of i'll
For the heaven they left behind them
Lingers in their presence still.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
DlcKERMAN, BARNEY Il CO..

49,, 70 and l2S Milk street, Boston,
L.., and Wholesale Dealers In Fluid and Cam
"a "a Soaps Candles Ac. Kerosene OIL constantly
.s"-a14 quality Warranted.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

it separates more perfectly than the fresh wa
ter springs. This is a great acquisition to
this country, as all the salt is imported from
the Lake. The next we'll Of importance is
the Hibbard or Buttonwood well, Brewer,
Kellogg and others, proprietors. This we'll
is one of the best and will run about 460 gal
Ions per day. The oil of this we'll is Of
thicker quality and will be better lubrica-
tor than the oils of considerable less specific
gravity.
The next we'll is the famous "McClintock
WE'LL" Brewer, Watson & Co., proprietors.-
The oil from this we'll daily,is variously esti-
mated from 1000 to 1900 gallons. The pro-
prietors of this we'll have large amount Of
oil territory and are either boring or have
bored some twelve wells on the choice points
along the banks of Oil Creek. They have a
a quantity of oil lands on the Caldwell Creek
one of the tributaries of Oil Creek. The in
dications on this latter stream are nearly as
good as any yet discovered. They are also
the lessees of the Indian Reservation in the
state of New York, where the oil is no new
thing.
The spring of Parker & Barnsdell of IT.
tusville which has been of doubtful promise
for few weeks is now one of the best if not
the best yet opened. think 500 gallons per
day not high estimate to p1t upon this
we'll. The oil is thin and fine and will lose
but trifle in rec:ifying. Barnsdell disposed
of one-sixteenth of their oil interest for $40,
900 cash, to company from Ohio, the whole
of which in September might have been pur-
chased for as many hundreds. These are all
the wells really in working order, but many
more are nearly completed and promise well
for the future.
This important and surprising discovery
of natural wealth is destined to make this
one Of the wealthiest portions of the country
Mechanics of all kinds are in great demand
the local trade has increased to more than
fourfold what it was in the fall Capital is
being invested in large amounts. The peo-
pie here have no idea Of depriving themselves
of the advantages arising from the influx Of
strangers, and seem willing and desirous that
all who choose should share their oppor-
tunities of making fortune. Now four
horse coaches daily over the road are INSULT
cient TO accommodate the travel which has
heretofore been accomplished with two
horse hack twice a week
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
Dear Sir:

As it has long bin the desire of my heart
to visit California trust you will pardon the
forward move make in writin to you upon
this subject. would first say that as am
thrown upon my own resources, this is
poor place for lone woman to work hir way
through the world with no one to cair for
nor protect hir. Although my trade, that of
a miiinor is one that should pay we'll, yet at
the west the ladies think that sunbonnet is
plenty good. Therefore milinor is las it
were) seldom called upon. So you see it
would be rather hard task for one like me
to rase means and still more so to undertake
a start for California without any one to look
to for guidance and assistance when there
And agane as am young it would be pre-
sumpt:ous for one at the age of twenty-one
and of SO lively turn as to launch out in
to the wide world alone and unprotected
but as said before have great desire to
see that part of the world, therefore-if you
know jentleman-(mark that) Gentleman
who really wants kind, faithful and lovin
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
HARRIS I.YNDS.

--a'e' II all kinds o. DRY GOODS. BOOTS SHOES.
Groceries Paints Olls hc &C. ZIG
'eachaIn Corner Vermont.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
To prais him when he acts Alright,
And when he errs, to chide-

YOU have my permission to recommend him
to me. provided he is worthy of a good COM
panion, and wants one bad enough to come
to Mantoon, Illinois, for her. For prefer
ence | would choose one that has the means
and will to establish me in a milinary store
in SanFrarcisco or any other business place.
there YOU see that am of business turn,
and out of business am out of my sphere in
life. And alone as am and but a small
capital it is rather embarrassing for one with
an aspiring mind. Therefore l pray you ex-
cuse me for this (perhaps) rash and hasty
step that have taken, and shall rely upon
your honesty, as Gentleman and perhaps q
Christian for wise and judicious as it were,
disposal of my hand, now my friend for 90 l
beg leaf to term you, betray not my trust,
and if you find no one to answer this, please
answer it yourself and if no more tell me
what place San Francisco would be for
good milinar-and now perchance you are .
single man
will wish for thee, the boon is rare
The choicest heaven bestows;
A friend to shair thy every cair
To soften all thy ,coes.
and now remember, should you recomend to
me A Gentleman
| ask not of his lineage,
ask not of his name.
ask not whair his youth WAS nursel.
Nor OF what land be came. (evsr)
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

y & ID LING & Co,
-OlHlNG. DRY GOODS & GROCERIES
Lunenburgh, Vermont.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
IRA l.. McCLARY,

e-,, Manufacturer and Dealer In
~'H' rs. WOODEN GLASS AND TIN WARE.
Lyndon, Vermont.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
Wanted, a Husband.

The Alta publishes the following unique
epis,Ie, which was received by postmaster
Weller Of San Francisco:
MATTooS, July 20, 159-
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
MILLER e. TRTLL.
l.. X OUINI II " u,

= 'ARRIAGE MANUFACTU RERS Open and Top
. = = Always had. Also all kinds of Carriages mad
: y ~. LYNDON Vt.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
Aew publications.
The Magazines.
The ATLANTIC MONTHLY.

The ATLANTIC MONTHLY.
The March number contains many inter-
esting articles. "The French characie er; ;"
The pursuit of knowledge under difficult
ties two articles of scientific nature, one
on The progress Of the Electric Telegraph"
and the other on "Screw Propulsion" both
written in an attractive manner; "Tae Pro-
fessor's Story" continued, are of the number.
The Reviews and Literary Notices embrace
several interesting books, and are written
with their usual ability. Parker's Reminis-
cences Of Choate gets severe raking, not
for what it does contain, but for what it does
not. Ormsby's History of the Whig Party
is treated as it deserves, and Redpath's book
on John Brown is rated al very low mark.
GoDEY's LADYS Book.
The March number is at hand fortnight
before it is due. The number has pretty
engraved frontpiece entitled the childis gift,
and there is story to match it in the text.
Cooley is favorite with the ladies.
JOURNAL OF HEALTH
Contents of March No. of Halls Journal
of Health, New York. 81 year. Speci-
mems ten cents.
Getting mad, its folly. The daughter VIC
tim of school ambition. Cnitary households.
The mischievous effects of books on Physiol-
ogy. The frequent falsity Of death-bed re-
pentance. The mischievous tendency Of pub.
fishing the hopes and professions of persons
who are hung. Advertising preaching. How
il! health prevents success in life. The FIVE
rules of heath. Winter shoes. Cure Of
corns. Weak eyes. Sabbath physiology
Best hair wash. Wearing flannel. To Con-
sumptives, &c.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
JOB PRINTING.

JOB PRINTING.
Our Printing establishment is in better condi-
tien now than ever before, and with increased fa-
cilities, shall give increased attention to this
branch Of business. We keep constantly on hand
Paper and Card Stock, and are now prepared to
print Posters. handbills, Programmes, Auction
Bills, Bill Heads Labels, Circulars, Business and
Wedding Cards. &C., &c.. at short notice.
Orders BY mail will be carefully attended to, and
the work forwarded with despatch.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

RATES OF ADVERTISING.
Per square (of Is lines,) three insertions, 81
For each subsequent insertion. l5c
Business Cards of FIVE lines per annum, SO
All short advertisements. such as Liberations.
Lost. Found. Estrays, Notices. &C., not probably
making over fifteen lines. are charged at 81: and
ing. must invariably be accompanied with the
cash.
-. Advertisements inserted till forbid (tf) un-
less otherwise ordered.
S. NJ. PETTENGILL & CO., ll9 Nassau st.,
New York, and 10 State ST.. Boston, are our
agents. and are authorized to take advertisements
at our lowest rates.
S. X. NILES, Scollays Building, Court ST.,
Boston. is also our authorized agent.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

=, ~ - u R j - Il N II -
BLACKSMITH AND CARRIAGE MAKER, .
Water street. Peacham, Vt. u
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

Geo. c. Il Geo. w. CAHOON,
a AIIURNEYS & COCNSELLORS AT LAW
AND SOLICITORS IN CHANCERY,
-! r AND FIRE INSURANCE AGENTS, LYNDON, VT.
hey will attend Courts in Caledonia, Orleans
AZ. Essex Counties.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
THE CALEDONIAN
PUBLISHED BY
q. M. 9ToN ME d co
IOHNSRTpY

TERMS.-One copy per annum, &1.5O
II not paid within the year $500
U No paper discontinued till all arrearages
are paid, except at the option of the publishers.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16
lpuOom Business Carts.

-. &. OTIS,
MARBLE DEALER, CHAsE's BUILDING,
LYNDON Vt. -
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

We saw in New York paper last week
tvo anecdotes of childhood, which pleased
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

L1NDON HOUSE, Lyndon, VI.
4 DAELlN,;, Promis;or Pa;rons Of the House con-
Tsei - ad rVm The Depo tree. Horses and Carriages
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

J. :. DURANT, NJ. ID.
Successor to Dr. ALLxaNLEk,l
Court street, Danviile. vt.
The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-03-16

VIM. w. G RO L II,
ATTORNEY < COUNSELLOR AT LAW,
!.'les MASsFIELDs BUILDING. BARTON, VERMONT
attend the Courts Orean, and Caledonia Counties
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1860-10-11
N.,O!::.44|::1:.

ger, or bricklayer, the cry is forever the.
same. Some wives wear an apologetic look,
always on their faces in the presence Of
their husbands, as though they would say:
Il am sorry to be such burden to you
sorry that you are so unfortunate as to have
a wife and little ones hope you will ex-
cuse US, we would not be here if We could
helpi it, And no doubt the poor woman;
means it-no doubt she dreams sometimes
of the deep cold rivers, which wrap their
waves around aching hearts and say, peace,
be STILL No doubt when Sunday comes,
she forgets to join in that part Of the litany
which prays for deliverance from sudden
death, and she learns to look at her chill
dren pityingly, and to whisper mournfully,
as she bends above them in their eradle.--
'How little you dream, poor darling, what,
a terrible sorrow life is.' -,
The fashionable woman takes different
course. The world knows what that is but
in either case, man is as blameable as:wo-
man. The Bible tells us that there is q
time for all things-after marriage q man
has no right to forget there is atime for
rest, and to devote che whole Of it to bust
ness. Let him count the number of times
his heart beats in one day, and make up
his mind to set aside certain measure Of
its pulsations for shome, sweet home.'r -
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1860-10-11

a@ The house Of Mr.. Moore, near Fort
Mills, York District, was burglariously en-.
tered and feloniously despoiled, few nights.
since, Of quantity of clothing some
money, and double barrel gun. place
lock on the stable after the horse is gone
and on this principle no doubt Mr.. Moore
will be more watchful, or watchful Moore
in future. Let every householder be on the
alert, and we'll hear before long of some
of these burglars getting the contents, not
of the house, but Of the gun which de.
fends it. Such an item we would chroni-
Gle with pleasure.-Sumter Dispatch.