The Kenosha telegraph and tribune. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1859-1860, 1860-03-29
Country REeetTn, Talk.

OF phonography, When he takes down the diff,
erent topics OF conversation at the same time =
vote for Lovejoy !" exclaimed political as.
pirant, Indignantly; "I'd as soon vote for Will
liam Lloyd Garrison himself, loaded down as he
| is with"
1.-TWO Of the latest beef critters you ever set
your eyes on" interrupted dealer in cattle,
" that sold for"
THAT horrid yellow dress again p exclaimed
Miss Spruce in what might have sounded like .
whisper if she had been on the other side of the
room; painted too, half an inch thick, and
wears" .
"Teeth and tOe-nais to get the Office" broke
f in another politician, "but people will not trust
him again besides, he isl
SPAWNED in both hind legs, wind>broken and
foundered to boot, as l told Mr.. Jarvis at the
Zone tea-cup full of butter. two ofsugar, three
OF flour, four eggs, and sprinkle of nutmeg
makes ''
"Both ends meet, when the year comes round
poor woman for she has got six children, the
Oldest one blind, and-''
mo saddle or bride to ride him with some
body stole it while was gone to Chicago
after"
"a grammar school teacher She tells more
than she knows-shows confidential letters to
Others and says she will never speak until
Fifty thousand dollars worth of clothing is
received, which in Fond du Lac is worth at
LEAST"
'Two Dutchmen, monkey, and haud-organ
to grind it; and oh it made the funniest music,
and the little figures danced about like"
4 mine thousand miles of railroad track, and
this is at an estimated cost d."
Rive cents a dozen l sold four hens to Mrs
Wilson, and the hawks carried off three, besides
any number Of chickens, and"
Such handsome young man and he dane
es SO beautiful Did you ever see handsomer
pair OF whiskers, or more insinuating-"
Handle to my new teapot, and tom declared
he had not touched it at all, and knew Emily
hadn't, for she had been all the time-"
"Running at the rate cf twenty-five miles an
hour with no head lights on; and around curve
at that, when the locomotive broke the bridge
THAT young Miss Brown who had the small
pox last Spring They do say she is going to
marry"
| wanted the gun the worst kind, and offered
! him.
''The scarlet fever and the whooping cough,
and don't know what he hasn't had, poor little
darling This is the first time have taken him
out SINCE"
"The Mexican war, which considerperfectly
unjustifable, unless it is on the ground that"
1.-THE preacher has come !" exclaimed boy,
and depositing my report in my pocket, I pro-
ceeded INTO the school-house to muse upon the
utility of photography.
| gB Artemm Ward, the "Great American
Snowman" relates in his peculiar style, the fol-
| lowing
| ''1NsIDUNT Is UTIKY.-In the Faul of 1859,
showed my show in Utky, trooly CRATE sitty
in the State of New York
/ The people gave me a cordyal recepshun-
! The press was loud in her prases.
One day as / was a given a description of my
Beests and Snaiks in my usual foury stile what
was my skorn and disgust to see big burly fell
Ter walk up to the cage containin' my wax fig
gers of the Lords Supper, and ceaze Judas Iscar-
rot by the feet and drag him out on the ground
He then commenced fur to pound him as hard
as he Good.
i ''Whst under the son are you about ?" says l.
Il SEE he, "What did you bring this pussylaner-
mus cuss here fur?' and he hit the wax fgger
another tremeDjus blow on the he'd.
SEE l., "You egreus ass, that airs wax figger
"a representation of the false 'Postle''
See he, "That's all very well fur you to say,
but tell you, old man, that Judas Iscarrot can't
show hisselfin Utiky with impunerty by q darn
site !" with which observashun he kaved in Ju-
dassis he'd. The young man belonged to one of
the hrst famerlies in Utiky: sood him, and the
IJoory brawt in a verdick of Arson in the third
degree"