Southern shield., 1860-02-04
COULDN'T FIND IT OUT.

Mir. Slocum was not educated in a University, and his life has been in by paths and out-of-the-way places. His mind is characterized by the literalness rather than the comprehensive grasp of great subjects. MT. Slocum can, howev- CT, master a printed paragraph by dint of spelling the hard words in deliberate manner, and manages to gain few glimpses of men and things. from his =f5 ifi;s of newspaper. It is quite edifying to hear Mir. Slocnm reading the village paper aloud to his wife after hard day s work. A few evenings since, farmer Slocum was reading an account of a dreadful accident which had happened at the factory in the next town, and which the village editor had described in great many words.
 T d'clare that was an awful accident over to the mills, said MT. Slocum.
 What was it about, Mir. Slocum?"
 ssI'll read the count, wife, then you'll know all about it."
 Mr. S. began to read.
 ssHORRIBLE AND FATAL ACCIDENT.--It becomes our melancholy and painful duty to record the particulars of an ac- cident that occurred at the lower mill in this village, yesterday afternoon, by which human being in the prime of life was hurried to that bourne, from which as the immortal Shakespeare says, mo traveller returns.'
 (sDu tell,o exclaimed Mrs. s.
 David Jones, workman who has few superiors this side of the city, was experimenting one of the large drums, T wonder if 1t was brass drum, such as has 'Eblabust Unum printed ont, said Mrs Slocum, when he became entangled. His arm was drawn around the drum, and finally his whole body was drawn over the shaft at fearful rate. When his situation was discover ed, he had revolyed with immense veloc- ity about fifteen minutes, his head and limbs striking large beam distinct blow at each revolution. "Poor creeter, how 1t must have hurt him !v When the machinery had been stopped, it was found that Mir. Jones' arms and legs were maccerated to a jelly; ("Well didn't it kill him?" asked Mrs S., with with much interest :; portions of durme- ta, corerrunt, and cerebelluna, in con- fused masses, were scattered about the floor; in short, the gates of eternity had opened upon him.
 Here Mr. Slocum paused to wipe his spectacles, and the wife seized the op- portunity to press the question:
 Was the man killed?"
 ssI don't know hav'nt come to that place yet you'll know when I've finish ed the piece" And MT. Slocum con tinued reading:
 ssIt was evident when the shapeless form was taken down that it was no longer tenanted by the immortal spirit, that the vital spark was extinct"
 Was the man killed? that is what I want to come al" said Mrs. Slocum.
 Do have a little patience, old wo- man, " said Mir. Slocum, eying his better half over his spectacles, I presume we shall come upon 1t right away"
 And he went on reading: 'This cas- ualty has cast a gloom over our village, and we trust that 1t will prove warn ing to all persons who are called upon to regulate the powerful machinery of our mills"
 Now" said Mrs. Slocum, perceiving that the narration was ended, ''Now 1 should like to know whether the man was killed or not?"
 Mir. Slocum looked puzzled. He scratched his head, scruitinized the ar bicle he had been persuing, and took a graceful survey of the paper.
 T declare, wife, said he, ''its curious, but really the paper don't say"
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