, 1860-10-19
A Newspaper Story.

Carolina paper, and other periodicals
lately threw up his commission, and sent
back the unpaid accounts with "notes," F"
which the spirit happened to lay hold on,
and they were presented in tangible
shape to the world. As they arc living
pictures, met with here and elsewhere, we
make extracts The collector says:
Editor Herald of TruM-Sm: You
furnished me, as you recolect, with list
of one hundred and seventeen owing sub
scribers. l have called upon one hundred
and four of them, and have the honor Of
paying over to your order three dollars and
twelve and one-half cents, being the amount
to which you are entitled. return you
the list numbered from one to one hundred
and sixteen, and now give the reply to
each
No. lis q minister. He says in the
frSt place he never got more than one-half
Of the numbers, "a lie, according to the
account Of the postmaster,) and in the next
place your joker's column was too scurril-
Gus. Besides, be knows by the tone Of
your editorials that you drink. He wants
nothing more to do with you-never wants
to hear from you again.
No. 2-Is in jail for debt. He has not
seen a half dollar for q year. Says he
would pay with the utmost cheerfulness, If
he had the money, but had to borrow a
shirt to pat on last Sunday. Admires
your pOper wonderfully, and hopes you will
continue sending it to him. He wishes
you to take bold stand in favor of the
abolition of imprisonment for debt, as be
thinks IL would be a very popular move
with gentlemen in bis situation. Sends
bis best respects a
No. 3--Is young doctor. Says your
paper is beneath the notice Of gentleman.
Wouldn't give - for a cart load.
Says you inserted an article rejecting 90
the profession. Only wishes be could
catch you here-wOuld make you smell l..
Is going to persuade everybody that takes
your paper to stop it. Cussed your bill,
and says you may get it the best way you
can.
No. 4-Is an old maid. Says You are
always making fling at single ladies Of an
uncertain age. WOuld't pay you II she was
rolling in wealth, and hadn't cash enough
to boy crust Of bread. Sent all your pa
pers back month ago, and says now that
she has sent them back, she don't owe you
anything. Says she is even with you, and
intends to keep SO until the day Of judg-
ment. t
No. 5-Is gambler. Says be has got
completely cleaned out last week at the
races. Couldn't accommodate bis. grand
mother with a hnlfdime If she was starving.
Likes your paper tolerably-WOuld like it
better IL you published more races, and
would occasionally give an account Of a
cock 6gbt. Hopes you wont think hard
Of him for not paying you now, but has a
prospect of soon having some loose change,
as he is after a rich young greenhOrn, who
arrived here last week. Win pay your bill
out Of the pluckiDgs. -
No. els an old drunkard. Hasn't got
Anything, and never expects to have
Gathered up oil the papers he had and sold
them for half pint Of rum, to the gFog-
gerry keeper, to wrap groceries 10.
No. It's a magistrate. Swore he
never owed you a cent, and told me l was
low rascal for trying to swindle him in
such bare-faced manner Advised me to
make tracks in little less than no time,
or he would get out warrant against me.
as common cheat, and have me sent to
prison. Is by all odds the meansst man /
have seen yet. Never will go near him
again.
No SIS politician. Says although
you profess to publish q neutral paper it is
not so. Thinks be has seen considerable
squirting towards the side he is opposed to
The collector concludes with accept my
resignation, and strike mo from the list of
agents. have been called a swindler,
rascal william, blood-sucker. These are
some Of the names they think proper TO be-
stow upon me. l tried lighting awhile,
and thrashed some Of your patrons like
blazes, occasionally got licked like thg6der
myself"
Gen. Wheat. late Of the Liberal army in