, 1860-11-08
HINTS ON MARRIAGE PROPOSALS.
With Anecdotes to Match.
NJ An EXPERIENCED CuAPERoS.


With Anecdotes to Match.
NJ An EXPERIENCED CuAFER0S.
Most women allow thai in the course ofthcir
lives they have gone through at least once
bound in 11nncr not to disclose circumstances
aui particulars. Men naturally enough utter
II refuse to detail their experiences on this sub
iect. Their Edith or Ecorgianun sit at the head
uf their table, md the mystical words used to
induce llcr to accept that position, whether in
tpircd 11y the feelings Of the moment, or Eul-
lied By the Light Of numerous previous failures,
we are never allowed to know. ], therefore, Is
I'm elderly lnatron, hope for so,ne gratitude
from the rising generation, If ! offer few sug-
@estioua aud write down suct information On
this mysterious subject rs I have stored up In
tlIeconrsc Of q lung life.
In the FIRST place, then Avoid too much
l.astc III matrimonial matters. Aclever writer
IN the Saturday ltvitw recommends no man to
,,iar1y iii &le has seen his beloved with i cold
in her head. If Ills affection will stand this
test, nothing, we think, eau chill 1t but this
writer, gather from evidence In his own ar
tIelc, Is y0un. and bachelor, and has cvident-
ly never made sea voyage. However, his
theory Is good SO far as it goes, mud might, If
generally acted upon, prevent some OF the con-
ifxten.ps arising from tasty offers Of marriage.
One such occurs to inc at this momcnt- a
proposal was written and sent by the post, In
tic DAYS whcn lcttcrs Travelled quietly 1t tho
rite Of ten miles an lionr on the mall coach.
The anxious lover for the 1ifst week breath
lcssly expected the reply, but it did not come.
The next week he pined, and was sleep1ess
still no answer The third week nc became
indignant "a civil acknowledgment Was his
due. She was hcartless and u fliH." The next
week he desFiscd her, aud congratulated him
self On lis escape; and when at the cuA OF 1t,
he received lis own letter back from the dead
letter Office, because he had, in his agitation,
forgotten to direct it, he had 80 completely
outiivcd Lis love, that he never proposed to
that lady at all"
In the tirst place always deal with princi-
Piles. II 4 girl is too yonng to know her own
mind, you had better wait till she is older
aud ii she is too undecided to judge Of her
own feelings, why not choose one little visor? ?
know fine disposition which was sourcd,
and the course Of Two 1ives materially darken-
ed, by 4 churlIsh old tather, who nercr told Lis
daughter Of the declaration Of attachment hc
had received for her, because hc deemed tho
Income offered to be insufficient. She thought
ler feelings la4l been tritlcd with, aud the man
4 hcartlces firt- Many years aftcrEard fhr
found out, by accident, how much she Lad
1nisjudgcd him; but then 1t was too Late
Let nit recommend young girls to shun the
lnan who If. even wien making love, wrapped
being able to throw bis mind into their occu'
pa:ions, Or 10 sympathize with their feelings.
Such j 1nau is either narr0T-hcarted or narrow
minded. once sAw mittdlc-aEcd invalid
making love to . young girl. After making
great ctforts to secure an opportunity Of meet
ing her, llc drew his chair close to hers, looked
into her face, sighed hcavily, draw lis chair
i5hmcnt, aud I, iu the distance. strained
ny cars to lcar what under remark
followed oil this preparation, I heard
"Who is yaur doc.ors" i need hardly say
tim: tile proposal Ga;led which followed this
il-iudged commencement. l. more par
donabIe case Of = mans absorption in llis own
one idca was horses. H. never found courage
to propose till he had persuaded the lady 10
60 into the stable and look at his farorite
horse There he spoke, and there she answered
res But thia was natural and pa1lonable; 4
Shy man may need bis vantage ground, and,
feeling his own inleriority in ths drawing.
room, 1uay yet be awaTr Of his superior
where ILLS horse is his throne, and he himself =
king, "
Inirdlp.-Ncycr express strong determine
tions on the subject Of marriage, unless you
mean to break them. 1 have seldom heard
An old bachelor declare that he had quite de-
cidcd not to marry, without feeling sure that
The subject was cngrossing good deal Of his
Thoughts, and soon afterwards seeing his mnr-
riagt announced in the papers. II q man as
sures you hc could never marty d widow, or
fast young lady, or . Z Eirl who Is fat, he Is
surc to do it; and when then the young girls
WHO honor me with their confidence, assure
mo they never could marty a man who IL
short, or who can't ride across country, or
who wears beard, or who has only five hun.
F9rn1 4 tn.
squire who rides without straps, OF forgets tu
wear gloves, consider that their doom ia
sealed, anu that their husbands will be the
opposite of their youthful ideal in these exact
particulars. But people fail generally dm cot
ou ron pcnc5e, and the 1t'schdnt Of this genera
tion Is certainly not to idcalika too much.
Warning, therefore, on this head is, perhaps
unnecessary. liather, l remind them tha!
Imagination is, as Schlagel tells Us, garden oi
Eden within us, which mcu ought to dress and
keep within bounds, not rutllessly fell.
Iplead, therefore, that little romance be
still left around tho proposal, even iu this
1noney-mas ling and mouey-arcling age. Lei
the words bc spoken at time and III a place
which imagination may love to dwell upon
| and beware Of the example Of Sir 0. p
n wcll.known pllisieian He is eaid to have
rolled the note in which he asked for the Ouch
css Of f--'s hand, round 4 plinl Of medicine
| She accept the bitter draught, but refused tht
mn. have also heard hat d beautiful hnt
accomplished lady. who had become an enthu
sIast In farming, with the vicw of bcnefttin.
| her tenants sud dcpcDdants, was proposet
| to" In new rig sty, hy an eminent asricultu
| rist, while they were discussing the yariou.
! arrangements aud improvements which NIGH
| be made in tho building. Here an cngrossins
! pursuit in common had assisted tla dknouc
nsenf; bnt such similarity Of tastcs may be bu
temporary, aud is fraIl foundation for lasting
union.
| A north country gcntlcm3a, = master o
hounds, and luan Of much Character and orig
| inality, but ehy and recultaf in society, was
| BY great similarity Of taste, thrown much !,
| the way Of a Lady who rode well. My eldcrl,
| checks tinglc with blush while write that
the gentleman, not improving the oppotuni
| tied given hin, Of declaring his sentiments
| when riding home with tho lady, af1cr hunt
Ing, she took step which, as am presenting
! the different aspects and circumstances Of pro
posals, feel bound, however unwillingly, t.
relate why should we not marry, 81
| John 7" said she. "Ah!" said Sir John, ~
hare often thought Of IT," And married the
| werel
There arc fatalities which seem to attcn
uron some 1oyers-etrunrc events, une1
pccted meetings, which sometimes promote
Sometimes prevent proposals. i masriagy
took place, not ulany years ago, in the grea
| world, where the two lovers {lopg attache,
but separated by the desire of their parents
met under Nh archwny while each taking re
| fn.e in London frou euddcn shower Of rain
Neither Of them had the least idea Of til
nelghborhood Of tho other, when the sudde
meeting occurred which decided the course c
their future lives. In another case the engage
ment was broken of on account OF limfte
means, and the gentleman went abroad. RI
turning after some ycar6 abscncs, he arrive
iste on the railway platform, and rushed int
The h5sl carriage he reached, Just Us the trai
was in motion. In j. he found with he
mothcr) the lady ho had been &c long yainl
endcayortng to forget, and the meeting endc
In one Of the happiest Of marriages.
In matrimony, az in other affairs, it is a1liu
! pertant to put the critical question In the VII
best adapted to the character md dlspositio
Of the person concerned 4 gentleman VII
had several sisters agreeable, sensible, mt
some Of them, tinelooking womcn-was on
dsy asked how 1t happened that they i
reached middle age unmarried. II Wil c,
plain," he replied. "Iaropokots without after
lions. Nd attentions without proposals: all
tbs is the clue i; .'v eietcrs' single life" T
take a IN s opposite example 4 friend Of min
with warm heart mud quick Impulses, IS niue
In the habit of decidedly ncgatlving any prol
ositIon when first made to her, merely on y
| count Of Its pQrelty, One day, while rcicrTi1
to her hnppy 1nasrlAge. inquired how 1t hal
pcned, With her dislike 10 new suggestion
that she did not say No, when her hu:bAn
| nronnsnd IN her u ~ abr sad I Il did BIT