The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1860-04-20
VOL. 3. NO. 38.
CAUGHTIN IN HIS OWN TRAP.


led with an air of adorable candor, lately pre-
Sehted herself before certain Partisan law
yer.
''Monsiear, / came to consult YOU on grave
affair. / want to o5iige man love. to mar
- me IN spite OF himself How shall I pro-
Ihe gentleman of the bar had, Of course,
sufficiently elastic conscience. He reflected a
/ moment, -Ren bting sure that no third person
/ overheard aim, replied unhesilalngly
"MademoselIe, according to our law, YOU
! always possess the means of forcing a man 10
/ marry you. You must remain on three occa-
! SONS alone with him, SO that you can 90 before
Judge aud swear that be is your over.''
''And that will suffice, Monsieur g"
eyes, Mademoiselle, with one further con-
ditiou." '''N' N'
"Wcn ?"
'Fhat you will produce witnesses who will
make an oath to having seen you remain good
quarter of an hour with the individual said to
have tFlied with your afections.'
''Fery well, Monsieur, will retain you as
counsel IN the management OF this affair. Good
day."
few days afterwards the young girl re-
| turned She was mysteE;ously received by the
lawyer, who, scarcely giving her time to seat
herself, questioned her with the most lively
ly curiosity.
"Well, Mademoiselle, how do matters pros
per ~
"Captal ="
"Psrsevere in your designs, Mademoiseile,
but mind the next time you come to consult me,
you must tell me what the name of the young
man IS, that we are going TO render SO happy
in spite Of himself"
"You shall have it without fail, Mon
sieur''
\ fortnight afterwards, the young person,
more naiUe and candid than ever, knocked dis
cree:ly at the door OF her counsel's room. No
sooner was she in the room, than she flung heI-
self into chair, saying that she had mounted
the stairs too rapidly, and that the emotion
made her breathless. Her counsel endeavored
to re-assure her, made her inbale salts and even
proposed to release her garments.
at IS useless" said she, 81 am much bet
ter"
"WelI, Mademoiselle, now tell ne the name
OF the fortunate mortal you are gong to ex-
,
"Weil, the fortunate mortal, be it known to
you, Is-yourself,'' sald the young beauty, bur-
sting into laugh. "I love you, | have been
| three times tete "a tete with you, and my four
! witnesses are below, ready and willing TO ac-
company me to the magistrate gravely con-
tinued the narrator.
The lawyer, thus fairly caught, had the good
sense not TO get angry. The most singular
fact of all is that he adores bis young wife,
who, BY the way, makes an excellent house
keeper.
n u
the hymeneal lists Of our exchanges in this fash
ION
Married in - county, North Carolina,
by Rev. --, Captain Graves, to Miss Nan
cy Graves.
The graves, 'tis said,
Will yield their dead,
When the last trump shakes the skies
But if God please,
from graves like these,
a dozen living folks may rise.
In Erie, Mr.. Henry Wiser TO Miss Lucretia
Head.
Wisely did Henry Wiser wed,
In Erie town Lucreiia Head,
It's hoped that he may richly prize her,
For tho she's lost her Head, she's Wiser.
A Virginia paper records the marriage of
Miss Jane Lemon to Mr.. Ebenezer Sweet,
whereupon our ''devi' moralizes as follows
How happy tbe extremes do meet
In Jane and Ebenezer;
for she's no longer sour, hut sweet,
Aad he's lemon squeeZer.
Here is a brief, but pointed s:essay on man -
AT ten, child at twenty, wild
At thirty, tame, if ever;
AT forty, wise at fifty, rich;
At sixty, good, or never.
Here is an essay on woman:
At ten, a bud at twent y, in bloom
At thirty, married, if ever;
At forty, mother; at fifty, aunt 4;
At tsixty, the probability is that the old
lady is something the worse for the wear.
GA good-looling young lady recently en-
tered dyer's shop, and thus accosted him -
''You are the man that dyes, are you not ?''-
"No,'' replied the gallant, 'I'm the man that
lives but III die for YOU"
Dy-On tombstone 10 churchyard in u
ster, Ireland, is the following epitaph :-"ETec-
ted to the memory OF John Phillips, accidentally
shot as a mark of affection by his brother"
C- We visited school the other day, and
among the many bright and happy scholars We
noticed one who was, to speak fguratively, ga
perfect brick" "Paul," said the teacher, "was
Moses ever married % al guess not,' answer
ID Paul, "Gor The Bible dom: say anything a.
oout .uyS. Hoses"
G-The great wrong of society is in LISTEN
1 ing to every idle rumor-every malignant re-
port-eyery vindIc,ive shear say" which may
have been set going, whether such a rumor
affects the integrity OF man, or the honor OF
woman.
esood MATCH" must not be surprised if he turns
! IT,