Burlington free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1827-1865, 1860-02-03
AMATEUR GYMNASTICS.

A young dyspeptic was induced by medical
advice to "try" the effect of gymnasium exer-
else upon his weakened stomach and muscles.
We copy the record of the young mans ex-
perience from the Knicker5ocker Magazine
didn't attempt any thing for a good
while. I sat and calmly surveyed the scene.
| saw very little boys, who seemed to be
qualifying themselves for India-rubber men.
saw great strapping men (new comers) at
tempt and fail in things which fellows whom
they could put in their pockets did with ease.
saw feats performed which seemed very
hard, and which turned out to be very easy
and feats which were simple to look at, and
spltters - to try: and then / took off my
coat and " went in pulled up the small
weights five or six times; | went along the
horizontal ladder and the parallel bars once
or twice. ] went home and found two fine
blisters on my hands the next morning. Still
I went there the next evening; exercised
twice as much as did before felt convinced
that was getting along very fast; and lay
awake almost all night, my arms ached 50;
staid away about a week, and then fell
to work again manfully; became acquainted
with young gentleman who knew the
ropes" and under his guidance, performed
many marvellous feats, and also met with
more mishaps that | believe anybody ever
met with before, in the same space OF time.
Being long and lean. and naturally awk-
ward, every new thing learned was ushered
in by disaster or two. But still perse-
vered, for now d" slept like top, and ate
at rate very alarming to my clearinghouse
keeper.
persevered for two long months, and was
still in a " full tide of successful experiment, "
when, on going to the gymnasium at my ac-
customed hour, one evening, | found brill
liant assemblage of beauty, brought together
by invitation Of the managers, to witness our
performances. | disported myself on the
floor for some time, until at length my evil
genius impelled me to ascend, for the first
time. ladder which ran up one side of the
room nearly to the ceiling, then across and
down the other side of the room Under the
horizontal part Of the ladder was temporarily
placed a spring board, of whose existence |
was unaware. | wiggled up the ladder with
convulsive Jerks of the legs, the audience
looking on in respectful silence but when
had reached the middle of the horizontal
part. locomotion became impossible | could
neither 90 backward nor forward, but hung
Mohammed's coffin. Isquirmed about with
my legs but could find no rest for the sole of
my foot. l could hold on no longer and as
the distance wasn't very great, determined
to drop TO the floor as gracefully as possible,
aud persuade the audience that it was done
on purpose. So let 90, and dolCn | came
perpendicularly-and up l went - flying.
I had come down on my feet upon the spring
board NY first impression was chaos;
my second was, that had dropped into the
mouth of a cannon just as it was going off.
Up went like shuttle-cock, almost to the
ladder, at which I made a desperate and in
effectual - claw" which threw me out of the
perpendicular, and doWn | came, bang in
sitting posture; up went again, and gath
cred my legs under me distractedly as | rose
so that when dropped again, was shot IN
a santing direction, head-foremost, as from
a catapult. into the waistcOat of a two-hun-
dred- pound man, who was looking on in open
mouthed astonishment. Down he went with
"squelch," and over him | went like
lightning, into the dressing-room | rushed
into my clothes, and out Of the building, and
have never entered a gymnasium since