Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1860-08-02


Our Great Biographical Enterprise" thus
annsiugly takes the lives Of the different preSi,
dental candidates now before the people for
their sufrages. Members of all parties can find
something TO laugh at in some OF them.
LIFE OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN.
By One arho KaO,cs Him.
The subject of our biography was born at
Bunker Hill on the 4th of July, 1916, and
vas one of the original signers of the precious
document which sealed onr liberties on that
day We refer to the Declaration of Indepen-
dence His fathers name was Mr. Lincoln his
mothers Mrs. Lincoln, and if he had any sis.
ters they were known as the Misses Lincoln.
At the age of two years, young Abraham
commenced splitting rails for a living, singing
beautiful hymns while so engaged, and display.
ing all those noble virtues for which he has
since been distinguished When he was about
ten years old, Boston suddenly became the hub
Of the universe, and required so much greasing
that cleanly people were Obliged to move away.
The Lincolus went to Illinois, where Abraham
became the ableSt lawyer ia the State in less
than week, and learned to chew tobacco. His
reputation for elOquence was unparalleled and
as specimen of his wit, we give the following.
Aaecd0te
On one occasion Mr. Lincoln was splitting a
raam the parlor of Judge Douglas residence,
when the latter joined him, and thinking to
naEea good joke about our hero's extreme
IeanneSs remarked
Why Abe, you arc a rail yourself"
Nj. Lincoln looked up from his work with
That sublime glare which has often petrified
world, and gravely responded
IOu sir, are the reverse of rail"
Douglas Immediately grasped his hat and
caFpet-bag, went to Washington, and asked
tae President to explain what Lincoln meant
by that
Why" replied the President the reverse
OF rall is rail Spelt backwards"
Since then, Douglas and Lincoln have been
warm friends.
Inc subject of our biography was defeated
Mr.. Douglas for the United States Senate,
III 1904 on account of sickness in the family,
ana mas since been known as /" Honest old
Noe 10 the whole country. He is the man
.. unaInchlng integrity, and though he chews
soOacco at present, will not choose the Weed
'O' =, companion if elected President
y, i6.-They author Of this biography died
immediately after penning the above work.
LIFE OF STEPHEN ARNOLD DOUGLAS.
0y one 0hO knOWs him since he uoas SO high.
Nr Douglas was born at Bennington, Ver-
aOuot on the 4th of July, 1916, and demon
SIs'ed the utility of Squatter sovereignty be,
aIE le threw off his crinoline HIS parents
SSs.ulSed to noble Scotch family, and when
SiFPqea Titt Ea Vas two years old, they emigrated
~ ,su un TO Illinois. 1t was during this jour.
Ie! 'nat he gave vent to remark which has
~ auCe become classical His father asked him
! ne would have an apple and on receiving
q answer in the affirmative, made a "splitn
~" ~ preparatory to dividing it into two pieces
srni suyo Mr. Dou glas suddenly graSped the whole
rhe Union must and shall be preserved
GlS immortal sentence was immediately tele.
s.spaed to oil the papers in the United States
fIa NJ" Ianada, and procured the election of Mr..
pOuslaS-tO the Office of Judge Of good whisky
. 'O0n as he arrived in Illinois. when about
.