Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1860-02-16
abit ann Dumor.
The Judges Saw-lOg.

In the village Of W lived man who
had once been Judge of the county, and was %,
known all around by the name of Judge
l.. He kept store and saw mill, and
was always sure to have the best Of bargains
on his side, by which meaps he gained an
ample competency, and some did not hesitate
to call him the "biggcst rascal in the world"
lie was very conceted withal, and used to
delight in Dragging about his business capac-
ity when any one was near to listen. One
rainy day, as quite number were seated y
round the stove in The store, he began as Z
| usual to tell Of bis great bargains, and finally
wound up, "Nobody ever cheated me, nor
they can't neither"
Judge" said an old man of the cons
pany, "Iye cheated You more'm you ever
lid nc" ..-.-.-
GLOW 50 ?" said the Judge.
| "If you'll promise You won't 90 to law
about it nor do nothn, I'll tell, or else
won't you are too much OF law character
Tor me-"
Lets lear let's hcarp' cried half dos-
90 voices at once. Well bear you out in it
go onP '
I'm promise" said the Judge, "and treat
in the bargain if you have" e
"Well, do you remember that wagon you
robbed ME out of ?"
81 never robbed you out OF any wagon"
exclaimed the Judge, 81 only got my own + q
"Well, made up my mind to have it
back and--," -...---. "a
"But you never did /" cried the Judge.
"Yes did. and interest tool" @
20 How ! thuudered the now enraged
Judge. &
"Wen, you see, Judge, sold yo1 one day.
very nice pine log, and bargained with
you for lot more. Well, that log I stole
off your pile, down by your mill, the night
before, and next day sold it to you. That
night drew it back home, and sold it to
you next day, and so | kept on until you
bought your own leg of me twenty-seven
times!' ',h
''That's e!' cried the mad Judge, run 9.
uing to Ills book and examining his log ac- .
counts, "you never sold me twenty-seven ,
logs of the same measurement"
"I know it," said the vender in logs. By
drawing it back and forth the end wore of,
and as it Wore, kept cutting it off until il
was only ten feet long-iust fourteen feet
shorter than it was the first time you bought
it, and when it got so short, drew it homo
and worked it up into shingles, and the next j..
week you bought the shingles, and then ! s
concluded that ] had got my wagon back,
and in my pocket book 49,.
The exclamation of the Judge was drown
cd in the shouts of the by-standers and the 81
log drawer found the door without waiting "
for the promised treat And to see mad /,
man, you have only TO ask the Judge If he
was ever shaved.
/ THE most overwhelming instance of "sub-
siding that we ever heard Of occurred o
few days ago in one of our large foundry
. yards. The proprietor of the establishment
is n man Of strictly anti-highlalutin notions,
both in appearance and address, but withal
a man Of sound sense and strong mind, who
had raised himself by these qualities to the
most cnviable position, in business and Pc
cuniary way. Looking after his business as
usual the other morning, gent Of consider
able dimensions of exquisite shape and form,
according to hisow measurement, hustled up
to Col. A., and in an inflated and patronizing
STYLE asked: ado you belong to this placer"
No. said the Colonel, bluffly, but the place
belongs to me- Gent subsided and retired
out of view, silently and expeditiousy, and
looking as if cruelty hurt, somewhere
4 A young lady in clearinghouse very
vain of her musical talent, was enc day enter
ttainining the company with song, when~a
crusty old bachelor came out of his room on
the next floor, and bawled from the top of tho
stairs what are you doing with that pig
Do turn that pig into the street. What pig?'
cried several. The old bachelor, descending
the stairs, looked into the room aud said.
L thought | heard pig squealing in this
room The girl never sang afterwards with
ont first ascertaning that the old bachelor was
absent.
Suicide is becoming very prevalent in my
city said q gentleman 20 an inhabitant of n
neighboring town. well, really, sir, / don't
know Of any city where it could prevail with
greater advantage to the world at large