Union County star and Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1859-1864, 1860-04-13
The Way to John Smiths.

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Trareler. Good morning, sir. vii
you direct mo the way to John Smith!
Sguattcr. Certainly, sir. If there
anything 10 the world do know, it is th
way to John Smiths.
T. Glad to hear it, Please direct me
8. That 1 will, sir. As Twas saying
II there is anything in the world l d
know, it is the way to john Smiths
John and me moved out from North Caro-
lima together and be has got the truest
pulling yoke of oxen you ever saw in you
born days. The way they pull
7. My dear sir, l am in hurry to ge
on-will you be so good as to direct me ?
s. Will? Why, that's what an
going to do. As l was saying, John and
me moved out together. He settled Ove'
there just pother side of the maple swamp
but he don't live there now.
I. In the name Of wonder, where does
be live, then! Now do, my good sir,
Just inform me the way!
S. will, that; for, as was saying,
if there is anything in the world l do
know, it is the way to John Smiths.
Why, John and me married sisters, and
he's got jam-up wife, l tell you. She
can spin her six cuts day, and attend to
family fixtures into the bargain. And
T. declare, sir, 1 shall get impatient
presently. My business is with Smith
no. his wife, or her family fxins either.
S. Exactly, sir, understand that.
But, as I was saying, Johns niger man
Bob is, l do reckon, the valuablest niger
in all these diggius. Why, be can pick
out his $50 pounds Of cotton day, and
then she'll turn of corn for mill at night.
He's clinker, now, mind tell you.
T. Well, 1 would be glad to see so
smart negro as Mr. Bob; 50 do, pray,
direct me to bis masters.
s. Don, be in such suivit, mister;
I can tell you something more about Johns
family you'd like to know. He's got the
smartest little gal that's in all Arkansas.
She's only been to school two years, and
she has got as far as amplifcstioD.
I. Confound John Smiths daughter,
and you with her Z! l think you have got
as far as amplifcation yourself For | ask
you a simple question, and you have been
amplifyiug for half au hour on different
subjects, and am no neare. getting an
answer it seems, than at first
s. Locke here, stranger; don't you
copfouud Johns daughter, for she's my
niece, and a smart one she is, too. Be
sides, it is not respectful to talk SO about
the child, seeing you know nothing about
her.
T. I beg your pardon, sir, l did speak /
too hastily. But come, tell me the way
TO John Smiths; for that is all l want to
know just now. Which road shall take?
S. Tell you the way! Yes, that l
will. Why, my Bill knows the way to his
uncle Johns. Bill, didn't you 60 to your
uncle Johns, the other afternoon, by
yourself! And didn't you ride old Dick,
and carry bag Of cotton to the gin for
spinnin' truck? And didn't old Dick
skeer and like to flung you! And
7. Good day, sir; and may old Nick
take you, and John Smiths daughter,
niger Bob, aud the whole family
S. The same to you and yourn. (Well,
sich another man l never did see. Why,
he's as techous as a half skinned eel. On
ly to think, be kept akin and akin, aud
l kept tellin' and tellin, and be wouldn't
stay to hear the answer at last Well, let
him 60 ahead but if he goes that road,
he'll never get to John Smiths, that's
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