The Van Buren press., 1860-02-03

] Quick on THE TRIGGER.-. You will
please observe. said old teacher Lamwell.
as he took us through his school the other
day, that the boys are required to observe
the utmost attention to quietness as Well 40
discipline
| We had at this moment arrived in from,
of several boys standing around a water
bucket. and one had Just charged his mouth
with the contents of the cup, while the old
gentleman was STOPPING over to recover his
pen from the floor, when another passing
along behind, snapped his fingers quick un
der the drinkers ear. which causcl him on
a sudden to eject the contents of his mouth
over the pedagogue's bald pate. Standing
upright, with his face and hair dripping. hs
shouted aloud
Who did that 2 The party unaai-
mously cried out. Jim Gunn. sir
James Gum, what did you do that fore'
Jim. appalled, a: the mischief ho had
done, muttered that il was not his fault
that Tom Owen snapped him. /.
| This changed the direction Of oil Lam
wells wrath. and shaking his cane por,en.
tlously over Owen head, he asked Did
you snap Gum 2 .
The culprit, trembling with fear. mut,cr-
ed Yes, sir, snapped Gunn, bu, di !ut
know he was loaded I
a SENSIBLE YoUNG LAdY.-Said a young
lady who was fashionably educated at boar
ding-schools, and INDUCED in idlencsj a.
home, so there was neither strength nor
elasticity in her frame
used to be so feeble that could 40,
even hit broom, and the least physics!
exertion would make me i'll for week.
Looking one day at the Irish girls, and no.
ticing their healthy and robust appearance.
determined to make a new trial. aad ses
1t could not bring the roses to my cheeks.
and rid myself oil the dreadful lassitude
that oppressed me. One sweeping day.
went bravely to work, cleaning thoroughly
the parlor, three chambers. the froat stairs
and the hall, after which lay down and
rested until noon, when ! arose aud ate Ia
heartier meal than for many day Since
that time l have occupied some portion Of
every day in active, domestic labor and no,
only are all my friends congratulating me
upon my improved appearance, but in my
whole being-mind, body and spir,---lo
experience wondrous vigor to which 1
have been stranger. Young ladies'. Try
my Catholicon. .
To MAKE FARMISG PRoFITADLE Evtiy
beginner in farming. by securing the fol
lowing essentials, will succeed
|. Buy no more land than there is cap:
tai enough to pay for, with one third more
surplu5-for small farm with plenty o,
meanYto stock it. enrich it, and carry on
its work, will yield more than a larger one
every part. with bad fences, poor imple-
ments, bony animals. weeay fields and s.ir,
crops.
2. Lay out the fields in the best order
so as to admit n systematic rotation. ana
to give ready access to every field at all
times without passing through other fell>
}. Provide good fences and necessary
gates and valuable time will not be lost in
driving out intruding animals. nor crops
lost by their deprcdations.
4. Furnish good farm. buildings. 70 Sc
cure properly the crops, and to afford shell
ter to animals.
5. Select the best animals and the >bes.
implements that can be secured for a rca-
sonable price.
6 Bring the soil into good condition by
manuring and draining. and keep it SO by
a judicious rotation.
7. Effect clear and systematic arrange
ment Of all the work, SO that there Shall be
no clashing or confusion.
-N