Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1860-05-22

acter; Tor was sure | had often acted to-
wards INN with the best possible intent. But
now my own wrong-dOing seemed so magni.
he'd IN my own sight, that feared it would be
equally SO in his, and so cut off all probability
OF his seeing any eXtenuating circumstances
in my favor.
"The thought nearly madlened me, that
some one else now enjoyed that social conf.
dence which ought to belong to me, and which
knew had driven from me by my rash,
blind folly. But worse than all was the
thought that he might love another; that
another would sooner or later enjoy that place
in his affections which | knew l once did
that perhaps, even then, he loved some other
more than me. Oh how beyond all price
seemed now that love, which | had so reck-
lessly trihed with.
"Ihe agony Of such thoughts and fears no
words can express; it must be felt to be real
lied. 1t was the torture of my waking hours,
the incubus which haunted my hours of dark
ness not my sleeping hours, for | neither ate
nor slept. Grief drove sleep from my eyes,
and choked me when | would have swallowed
food.
"Thus days passed into weeks and months
My husband came not near me and | avoided
him, not because l did not wish to see him,
but because feared my presence might annoy
him, and turn what hoped was only nditfer-
ence to me into hatred. My friends srove to
cheer and comfort me with the best possible
intent, but all to no purpose there was no
pleasure for me, and | am satisfied that, with
out reconciliation, never could have enjoy
ed another moment OF happiness.
AT length l received a brief note from
James, asking me to meet him at our old
home at an early day, that we might take
such measures as should be deemed best for
the disposal Of our furniture 1t was a mere
business note, just as he might have written
to stranger
| examined it by every possible light if
happily l might find some word which
would bear tender construction But
no, indifference at least, dictated words SO
clillingly formal.
Now could l comply with his request? 1t
would be severing the "last link which bound
us" Momentarily, l thought of it, until the
appointed day arrived. | knew | must GO so
L schoOled my feelings as | hoped into indifier-
ence, lest, if gave way to them, might APP
pear ridiculous in the eyes Of the man whose
good opinion even then coveted more than
that of all the world beside.
"But my efforts were all fruitless. My feel.
ings completely mastered my resolution, and
wept like a child. James took up a newspa-
per and appeared to read during this burst of
tears. When l was somewhat composed, he
said calmly, though not harshly, and looking
from me, shall we now proceed TO DuSinesS!"
Gone by one we took up the different arti-
cles and decided what disposal to make of it,
each decision piercing me with anguish |
did not want a single article myself as the
sight oft would only serve to remind Inc of
what had 50 unnecessarily cast away so l
left him to do with them mostly as he pleased,
as the stoicsm which he manifested while do
ing it seemed to me perfectly wonderful, l
tried to make myself out a wrong and ag-
grleved person, and to make myself feel as if |
ought to be offended, indignant, angry, re-
vengetu But it was no use Turn the
whole affair as l would, was the aggressor,
the sinner could not conceal it from myself,
and consequently could find no one else to
blame but myself.
''Still it seemed as if my punishment had
already been commensurate with my guilt, tor
l felt conscious that much OF the latter had
arisen from the defects in my disposition, CON
sequent upon early injudicious training rather
than from malice or intent OF wrong.
"Ater while James took up one article
marked with my initials. Chose had better
be sold, | said 81 shall never wish to see
them again, and Of course you would not wish
them, il you were TO keep house again !"
"a vision of another wife in my place arose
before me, and almost blinded me.
Gle laid those down and took up some 9th
ers which were not marked. Il would not
sell those l said you can get very little for
them, and they will be of more service to you
than TO any one else.
"'WhenE he asked, and why 2?
because you will OF course keep house
again, and perhaps soon-will you not?'
4 hope so, he said, and his voice was the
least bit tremulous.
"He then took up the marked articles. and
asked, And why will not these be useful to
me, too Z?
Il turned away to conceal my tears, as |
said in low voice, Il thought you might not
like 10 have them to remind you Of me, when
you keep house AGAIN
''I shall neoer do it until you keep house
with me, he said quickly and firmly.
81 knew not what to think. Did l hear
Alright! | turned around as if attracted by a
magnetic force. My husband had stepped
close to my side, and stood with open arms
In a moment | was clasped warmly to that
heart which priced more than all the world
beside. felt its beatings against my own
they throbbed III unison. | was happy that
heart now beat for me truly. | need not be
told OF it. felt it in my innermosl being.
knew it.
"'We will now have true marriage it
shall be no priestly ceremony, my dear wife.
1t shall be forever and ave- whispered nv
husband, as his lips touched mine.
"'And no evil spirit of mine shall ever
again come between us. l now and forever
exercise them all, answered l. as | held his
hand in both mine.
awe went again together to our old home
In my sleeping room | hung up the delaine
skirt, that it might serve as charm against
my evil spirits, should they ever attempt to
come near me again"
Almost before Aunt Mary had done speak.
ing, Uncle James came in; his boots leaving
great tracks of dirt at every step pulled off
hat Wi 1,,at ti,u