Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1860-04-21

ken, you lodged your whole m0uthful upon
yourself. | thought your suicide was COM
mitted before; and the only way can ac-
count for your appearance last week, is that
the snake wiggles its tail after it, dead. In
addressing YOU now, am laboring underline
settled conviction that j am sending a mes
sage to the spirit land the Herald being
a spiritual medium
Agreeably to my expectation old Towser
set up bis howl, and YOU and are having
"a genuine dog-iight. BY the way, could nj
YOU give me SOME name as have you so
The public could hurrah by name for which
ever is son top'g have named you Towser;
could Mt you name me Penny, or some more
appropriate name9 Speaking Of names, /
forgot to make an observation iii my last
concerning your name. find you have ta-
ken it after mine--CRITIoUE's CRlTIc after
Critique. 1t is the custorl when lady
names a new born in honor Of particular
individual for that person 10 present the child
with new dress. In accordance with this
custom, 1 gave you one which you say you
put to good use by wearing when you had
got through with your "dlthy job" Tank
ing it may be considerably tattered / am
now endeavoring to give you another dress
ing. Notwithstanding the several classes in
which you have placed me-as ascholar, a
linguist, a lawye, an editor and blackguard
Il had never before SO much "conceit'' as
to think myself fit subject for theological
discourse On a text selected from the Bible.
And then to have that same funeral sermon
put me to doing the "dirty work" in the
Herald Office, puzzles me worse. / confess,
the bows do sometimes of late call me the
internal spirit Of the Herald Office, wheth-
CT on account Of lately acquired mischievous
propensities OF because have cot into cay
il with you, | do not know, but protest,
sir, that this is only the fourth piece of 'sdir-
ty work" | have done since being here The
first was correcting a dozen errors in--leav-
ING as many more uncoirected-and put
tine in type an article entitled "Cratsqae
| Criticised'; the second, replying to it.
which was inclined to do just as one IS IN
Iclined to clean the mud from his feet; the
third was putting in type "Bfachguard, az
las Crttique," and committing the uncon-
scionable error Of refusing to correct it ex-
cept in some half dozen places; the fourth
as observed, is writing this reply, which
| am actuated to, | suppose, by the same
motives with which that more potent infer
nal spirit torments has poor souls when he
has them ensnared. / ike your ingenius
way Of trying to bring the editor into this
caninity. | am ''permitted" here 'throngh
his forbearance,n am ]? All you whelp,
you Ananiassaphira, / dare you to the proof.
You re pretty looking pup to throw pow
erty up to mel You, who come round an
uually begging aims, or extorting black-mail,
and succeed in raising as much as keeps half
the rest Of the county paupers, will tell me
that | "obtiude my long ears upon your
steps, - you asinus asiaorum, youi--
Where d you been if nobody had Mt gin
you nothin' last summer! Where II you
be fore long ag'in if somebody don't do
somethin' for yer2 Just read my friend *.
N. Peppers addresssto his ginny, IN the
50 - sanelsin which ssblackguarded you,.
ana c0TSiucr
do yer heart good, il vii, you whinin' cat
intestine, you. Now'look here Mr. Thing
lumbob, you say / profess to have passed
| thro' stndry schools Of Science and Law.
Who told you So? Isn't Lar one Of the
Sciences? l have nade no pretensions, and
you and Others have got to find out what
my "native tongue is BY experience. Won't
initiate you by threatening the worst, for |
/ will be satisfied if / can keep big Towser UNI
der half the time; but wo Mt run again for
| find by my promise not further to notice
you, that it only makes seold whine the
more. You need not have warned me about
writing another notice Of your school: I'M
derstand fellow over there about your size
occasionally woods the boys and tumbles
them down stairs. You do MT catch me over
there. Abiding to fear, must say | adj
mire your digniied way of getting out Of
your use of the word "ce," You first try
to put the dirty thing into my mouth by
using it in quotations, 6 same as you
quoted your own phrase, "lads under twelve
years Of age" and several others-on par
with imputing language to me because you
had nothing else to assault, as for instance,
where you make me to say "no one, at his
peril shall NEEDLE, &cn OF course you
meant .sosay one" only an ingrammaticism
like some twenty others in the same piece.
Where does that quotation end 1t com
mences at /" Ne" and as / could not fird any
quotation mark to end ii, | conclude you
make me to write the whole article. won't
claim it. 1t kind o runs through my "Wee-
est kind q brains" that there are some things
| you do nj knew. Your commas should MT
be put outside Of your quotation marks. |
corrected all these errors but one left it just
for aesaiment. 1t looks SO lonely standing
away off there by itself-there by the quo
tation "childish things, which you make
me TO say after "sneering at grammatical
rules and add that refer to an "ootiqua-
ted Textbook to discard the use of the
phrase ''nom de plume" All you are
great guesser. There are some other con-
illusions you guessed at in the composition Of
that production" just to stir up your soul
and inyigorate it with the fire of repentance,
look on page 500 Of the November number