Daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1865, 1860-01-09
From the Chicago Journal.l
How JoIIybInde Made New Years
Calls.

How JoIlyblnde Made New Years
Calls.
No. 1923, SoUrn WATER ST.,
Jan. Sd, 1860.
MR. EDIroR:-Wc have been making
New Years calls, that is Jollyblade and |,
and how we made them, what we did,
where we went, how we got into them and
how VIC got over them, eccs sigu'm!'
Monday morning, January second,
eighteen hundred and dash, l was sitting
in this old chair" kicking the androns
until the brass dogs grew red in the face
at my impertiucnce, and coloring mcer-
sciuum, which is very obstinate and very
greasy. Knock on the door. "Come in
Enter Jolly blade.
JOllybladc is universally instramural.-
Wears Il red scarf, drives TifIItnys fastest
.scrubb' discounts lie BrUn atBrunswick's,
chews bank bills and is huge on the oppo-
site sex.
"Wish you happy New Year, Bangs,
my boy" said he; ''going round to do the
samples to-day? The Bank has closed
doors for this occasion only, and am
bound to have tear. Will you penetrate?
Don't say no. The old governors are
going to open the cellars mhmmas will
do the pretty, and thy young 'uns-my
cycs!-won't they gyratc?
| agreed. Jollyblnde waited while
donned another rig, and we sailed forth.
-Four hundred calls in twelve hours"
said Jollybladc; rather think it would take
old Ten per cent. round to the shop, some
time to calculate that, but then, Bangs, the
more you stops in, the more you gets you
know.
Arrived at Brckfront's. Brickirout
deals in corner-Iots and swamp-lands:
fortune way up in the zeros; used to be an
apple pcdlnr; wife fat and fifty: used 10 do
cooking for a small family; two daughters;
passabc, because they'll get the dimes,
when old B. gets the only real estate. he
ever honestly came by: six three on long
time, in very populous and growing
place; entirely unincumbcrcd.
King Il. was grouty; Queen d. loquH-
cious, and the younger BIS very buzzing;
drank port; compliments of The season,
Mrs. b." drank moro port; never saw you
look 50 charmingly upon honor, Miss b.
ported some more.
Port very good" said Jollyblade, after
We left, "but BIS, deviIish snobs.'
! Mou7At JoUybialc 'cas imp"dsnt
Came to Widow Flamingo's; blinds shut;
door knob ;nigrcsCcnt: undertaken hanging
round the front gate. Say, old coffin
shop" said Jollyblndc, chow much do you
get for hanging round here, doing the de-
tunct dodge? Aren't you ashamed of
yourself, you, n man Of family, with five
poor but respectable children, cousentinG
to cheat the great public; yes sir, to swim
die this great community by making them
believe that Fiamingo is dead, when the
Young Flamingo is looking out of those
blinds, there, hearing every word l say?-
Its grave offenzc, sir
hurried JoIIyblade along and the un-
dcrtakcr wimkCd solcmuly and commenced
taking an imaginary measure of my friend.
Call the next, at Peanuts, on Michigan
Avenue. Peanuts owns wheat lottery;
.yollybladc was very taikatiyc. "How arc
you Mr.. Peanuts, wheat up? Mr.. Peanuts
your most obedent; charming Sherry;
Miss Peanuts, my dear, allow ME to wish
you a very happy New Year; Peanuts,
Bangs; Bangs, Peanuts; capital sleighing;
most auriferous sherry; regular Nriarte;
have you invested in Scely's candy boxes
Miss Peanuts immense institution; hal
dollars worth of candy for fifty cents
and tin rattle: Miss Peanuts, may your
shadow never he less; a little more sherry;
angclifcrous Miss Peanuts, and hope you'll
draw that horse in Thomas candy boxes;
pom honor, | do.
/ taoughi JoIly5lade 'gds getting tight.
/ hurried Jollyhladc away for he had
commenced stream of conversation,
which had no apparent cnd and required Il
most positive mild I'm to check it.
Pepys, the only man on record who was
ever successful in keeping jCnrpnl,
would probably have diaried the balance
of our visitations somewhat after this
style:
Called at Swigg's: family at dinner;
wouldn't call them from their meal. so
took n champagnc with the scFTant! ser
want wished JoIlyblude happy New Year
Eud would like half dollar. J.b. pro-
nounccd him brick, and left him with
that clnycv blessing. Found Spike at
home; tcliybludc astonishcd the old maid
en-, by calling her a trump and inquiring
after her childrcnt drank Madeira. After
leaving: JollvbIaGc executed a hornripe on
the sidewalk; in front Of Rev. Scribe But
terrnlk 8 paiGtial mansion aud insisted
that | was tight
kacr Jotlpbiadc 'rdi tight
We next called Mt itev. Mr.. Buttcrmiih 5,
after the accomplishment nf the hornripe.
Joll-blade assumed dignity which fitted
like the new Police Uniform. lie made
desperate attempt to seine Rev. BUTTER
uilk's hand, hut by 4 utiscu!cufatioui
raught tie servants, anu astonished that
iiibeiuian functonaty By complimentiug
him upon tis las: seruioh. (which vas d
stuumer, d-~r me if il Wn5t'th hT. II.
raises his hunds III holy horror, and Mrs.
II. sHuons, tcilyhladc scises aecnhter
pF rlarct, Fusiics towards her with 1t,
changes bis mind aud ncarlt drains Il
tihiseif. servant politely shows Jolly.
t,!aiG ihc door and t7e hiske Dur s5it, Il
say iiaogs, nV 10y, did fGu see that cid
'u' 5Wo0n ~ .hEi sihtI hal hEJ old hst"t-