Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1860-09-19


k.ns, and sez he, LAY there Mr. Smith and
let us hear from you by the next mail. For
minute l thought was bound for glory, but
pooty soon l come to my oats, and then roll.
ed over and seen Bob a squeezing Sal's hand
All right, my prooshian blue, says /, there'l
be pothecary's bill for some family in this
heere destrict; bat won't say who's to pay
it at present. jest waited to see the feller
try to put his nose into Sal's face, and then !
stretched to my feet, and sez l, sThis here pas
ture wants a little mashing down to make il
fruitful, aud it's my impreshun that can do
it, Sal seed that was bound to make some
body smell agony, so she jest ripped away
from Bob, and marveled for the house, scream
ing sfire' like a scrumptious fire department.
Bob looked after her fur mint, and then he
turned to me, and sez he, 81 hope your folks
have got sum Grape to hum, because there's
going to be a job for our wirtuous sexton. |
kinder smiled outer one eye and sez |, sWhen
Sal and is married, we'll drop tear fur the
early decease of an individual who would
never have been born eff it hadn't been for
your parents" |
This riled Bob up awful, and he came right
at me like amad bull at red shirt. l felt
something drop on the bridge of my nose, and
seed hull nest of sky rockets, all to once I;
but only kneeled for the shake of tail, and
then | piled in like mad Buffalo with the d vs.
entery. 1t was give and take for about five
minutes; and tell you Bob played away on
my nose like Trojan. The blood flew some,
and was sorry hadn't said good bye to the
folks before left them but gave Bob some
happy evidences of youthful christianity a
round his goggles, and pooty soon he looked
as if he had been brought up to the charcoal
business. We was making pooty good time
around the iot when all of suddent, Sal cum
running with her father and mother; and says
the old teller, sEf you two members of the
church don't stop your religious exercises,
there II be some preachin from the book of
John g.-
With that Bob took his paw out of my hair,
and seq he, 'Smithses hit me the first
whack.' lJest promenaded up to the old man,
and sez I, sIt you'll jest show me good bury
in' place, I'll take pleasure in making funer-
al Tor the Tompkinses.' The old man kinder
looked querious at Sally, and she commenced
to snicker, and sez she, sWhat are you two
fellers rumpussing about?' sIt's to see who
shall hev the pootiest gal of all the Greenses.
When said this, the old man bust into loud
larf like wild hyenar, and the old woman,
she put her hands across her stummick and
begin to larf like mad, and Sal she snickered
right out in my countenance, and sez she,
sWhy Pm engaged to Sam Slocuml' =
stranger there's no use talking. NV hair
riz right up like blacking brush, and Bob's
eyes stuck out like peas out of yaller pod.
There was speechess silence for about two
mints, and then sez Bob, There's couple of
golfired fools in this country somewhere, and
it's pity their dads ever seen their mothers
l seed he felt powerful mean, so l walked up
to him, and sez |, Suppose go and look
for the new Jerusalem p He jest hooked to
my elbow, and without saying another word,
We marvelled for hum.''
essence that, [ hain't held no communion
with petticoats, and eff ever get married, you
shall have an invite to the funeral. Have
another chaw stranger ?''
politely refused the delicacy; but compli-
mented the Yankee On his excellent resolve,
and invited him to look through the bottom of
tumbier at my expense when We reached the
next stopping place.