The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1860-01-25
Denison's "Succedaneum."

The use of that high sounding, sonorous
word, "Succedaneuns" in Gov. Dennison's
Inaugural has subjected him to a great
deal of ridicule. Decidedly the best satire
upon this specimen of pedautry, is furnish
ed to the Statesman, by a Washington
City correspondent SAM. Cox, as we
verify believe. He commences by quoting
from several very ancient authors, one
of whom says: II cherched on the Chi
nese wall, a strange animate of the lizard
kinde knowne in ancient oookes as cham.
elion." This "animale" the finder of it
calls "succedaneum" The correspon-
dent then quotes that passage of the In
augural in which the word occurs, as fol-
lows:
"If attended with success at the threshold
in dissolving the great confederacy and
creating a small one-the introduction of
standing armies to confront border war
on the slave and free frontiers to maintain
them and keep down domestic insurrec-
tion would be-the ISuccedaneun,. Ssh
William Dennison's Inaugural.
After rejoicing over his good fortune
in solving the meaning of the word he
goes off thus:
I am plain man now, sir. I used to
admire the hidden secrets of creation
IT 70 oAu ha ctv1o of
literature in my youth. once read Kant
and his German metaphysics: I thought
l had spiritual cognocence of his
psychological irrefragibility, connected
with aconcutient ademption of incolument
spirituality, and etherealizeG concretion
qf subsaltory mnemonics,'; but, Sir, all
these mysticisms were as nothing compa-
red to the wonder which lay SO dimly hid
den in our new Governors Succcdaneum
He describes the effect which the word
had upon him when in reading the Inaug-
} ural he suddenly encountered it:
Hand me that lexicon quick!" said I
to friend
"What's the matter, Mr.. Chanticleer.
are you going to faint? Have some har:s-
horn, water brandy?"
"Yes; give me brandy first, and then a
lexicon!"
; After short pull at the liquid, leap
ed into the lexicon Another palencss
came over me. Oh! heavcnsl The lexi-
con was abridged" My nerves under.
went another spasm, and 1 tainted!
He proceeds to tell how the phantoms
of "succedaneums' haunted and Knocked
him, sleeping and waking. The next day
he found among the dust and cobwebs o.
the Congressional library the extracts with
which he commences his "loosed' elucida.
ton" which he does up in this sytle:
"The word is a compound of two Latin
words, sub (under orr m and cedere Ito go)
that u.s. literally, to go under; or, vulgate
to ego in." Hence Succedaneum mean,
coming after, or going in after, or follow
ing after something else to take its place
hence, substitute. Now for its practica
and political application.
l. If John Smith be listed for a war o.
"mill." and he has no stomach for salt
petre or blows, and hires the Upton Slash
y er to "go IN" for him, the Slasher is a
Succedaneum!
2. If there be hot chestnuts in fire
and you want TO get and eat them withou
!" burning your own fingers, and have nea
!" some one you can use for that purpose
g the one used is --Succedaneum! Th
q is a political fable. 1 commend it t,
! Chase, Gibson & Co.
8. Il you were politician of the Re
publican order, and wanted to get up II
IL insurrection against the south and preach
- !, ed it long, loud and strong, but hadn't tn
II courage to Go as you preached-go t.
e Ossawatomie and stir him up to steal ant
t murder. He becomes to you a-Succe
- daneum!
o 4. IfOssawatomie gets neckerchief o
+ twisted hemp on Virginia platform o
Union principles-and you are snug a
: home shreking with an open throat 70
j the Martyr of Liberty--why Ossawatto
), mie is your. .Succe laneum!
e S. If in place of the old simplicit,
which belonged to our Ohio Inaugura
! tions, there is gotten up grand militar.
o and civil parade, with royal honors and ,
}, four horse carriage for the new Governor
II and an infnity OF splendid splurges
. that is a very reprehensible sort of a
: ISucceddneum!
S 6. To go get deeper into the spiritua
9 significance, if, instead of brotherly low
q between States, your Governor inspires
. hate and wrath-that also is bad-Succe
y daneum!
t 7. If instead of laws to carry out th'
Constitution, your Legislature enacts new
q Hebeas Corpus and Personal Liberty, bill
y that also is miserable sort of -Succeda
n neum'
+ 8. Again, ifinstead of Governor Chase
there should be elected United State
e Senator, Corwin, Delano, or some othe
o Republican with shade o: so less o
e Ebony--that election would be a-Suc