The weekly Ottumwa courier., 1860-05-10
New Patent Egnes.i.,a.

One of the brief hits by "John Phoenix
at the follics of the time, is contained in that
linexhaustible fund of tun, his volume oi
"Phnnixiana."
DIR. Tushmaker was never regularly bred
as aphysican or surgeon, but he possessed
naturally strong mechanical genius and a
fine appetite, and finding his teeth of great
service in gratifying the latter propensity, he
concluded that he could do more good in the
world and create mere real happiness there.
in by putting the teeth of the inhabitants in
good order than in any other way; so he be.
came dentist
He was the man that first invented the
method of placing small cog. wheels in the
back teeth fer the more perfect mastication
of food, and he claimed TO be the original
discoverer of that method of filing cavities
with kind of putty, which, by becoming
hard, directly causes the tooth to ache so
grievousy, that it has to be pulled, thereby
giving the dentist two successive fees for the
samejob.
Tushmaker was one day seated in his Of
flee in the city Of Boston, Mass, when a
stout old fellow, named Byles, presented
himself to have back tooth drawn. The
dentist seated his patient in the chair Of tor
ture, and opening his mouth discovered
an enormous tooth, on the right hand
side about as large, as he afterwards
expressed it, "as small polyglot B.
BILE" 'T shall have some trouble with this
TOOTH thought Tushmakcr; but he clarped
on his heaviest forcnps and pulled. 1t didn't
come. Then he tried the turrlScrew, exert
ing MS utmost strength but the tooth wou,dn't
come.
$50 away from here" sail Tushmaker to
Byles, land will draw that tooth out for
you, or you'll know the reason why"
Bylas got up, clappeA handkerchief to his
Jaw, and went forth.
The dentist went to work, AMI in three
days he invented an instrument which he
was confident would pull anything. 1t was
combination Of the lever, pulley, wheel
, and aIels, inclined plane, wedge and screw.
The casting was made, and the machine put
UP in the Office, over an iron chair, rendered
perfectly stationary by iron rods going
down into the foundation of the granite
building.
In week old ByIcs returned; he was
clampoa into the iron chair, the forceps con,
, nccted with the machine attached firmly to
! the tooth, and Tdshmal;er, stationing him,
self in the rear, took hold of the lever, four
| feet long.
He turned it slighGy-o;d Byles gave a
grcsn, and lifted his right leg. Another
turn, another groan, and higher went old
Byles right leg.
"Whnt do you raise your right leg for .
asked the doctor. d.
II can't help it," said the patient.
"Weil," said Tushmaker, "the tooth i.
bound to come now"
lie turned the lever clear around with ;
sudden jerk, and snapped old Bylcs' heac
clean and clear from his shoulders, lcav
! ing space of four inches between the sever
al parts.
They had a post naortem examination; tn.
roots Of the tooth were found extended dow
the right side, through the right leg, aid
turned up in two prongS directly under tn,
sole of the right foot
'No wonder" said Tushmaker, "that h,
raised his leg"
The jury thought 50 too but they found III,
roots much decayed, and two surgeons swear
ing that modification would have ensucd il
few months, TuslInaller was cleared on
verdict of '.justifabe homicide
lie WAS a little shy of that instrument af
terwarls; but one day an old, feeble ant
flaccid, came in to have her tooth drawn, ans
thlakingit would come out Tery easy, Tush
maker concluded, just by way of variety, t.
try the machine.
lie did so, and at the first turn drew tn
old lady's skeleton completely and entirel,
from her body, leaving hera mass of CULVER
| ing jelly in her chair.
Tushmaker took her home in a pillow case
She lived seven years after that, anl the,
called her the India rubber woman" Sh
had suffered terribly with the Rheumatism
but after this occurrence never had any pai.
in her bones. The dentist kept them in
, glass case.
Afterwards this machine was sold to tn
contractor Of the Boston custom house, ant
it was fund that a single chll, three year,
of age, could, by single turn of the screw
rase stone weighing twenty-five tons.
Smaller ones were made on the same prn
cipie, and sold to the keepers Of hotels an,
rest, rants. They were advantagcously uset
for boning turkeys.
! There is no moral at all to this story, an,
tits possible that the circumstances may hav
become slightly exaggerated. Of course
| there can be no doubt of the main incidents
The Coyode Congressional investigator,
Committee (sats the Washington correspon
dent of the Cincinnati Gqzstte) has mad
| more startling discoveries Of corruption i: