Muscatine weekly journal. [volume] (Muscatine, Iowa) 185?-1890, 1860-02-24
FuIlnygraPhs.

In Detroit, they say there are but
three rounds of negro's ambition--a banjo,
a boss. barber and white wife.
H-s'The only liberty cap" says clever
and witty author, ''is the night cap. In it
men visit; one-third of their lives, the land
of sleep-the only land where they are al
ways tree and equal"
wAn old lady, few evenings ago, IN
some "reminiscences of her girlhood, when
she had lots of beaux, exclaimed
"Why, the truth is, that at one time was
so happy that was fairly uncomfortable !"
~"Well, Annie, how did you get along
with that stupid fool of lover of yours
Did you succeed in getting rid Of him 90
SO, yes got rid of him very easily.
married him and he is no lover now."--
(Spoken in a modest manner.)
e~ An original way of answering two
questions at time:
"Here, Biddy, my darlnt, wha;'s the
time O. night, and where's the pertaty pud-
ding?"
s'It's eight, sir"
Tue UN1tN--A patriotic Union saver got
off tie following at Columbus, o., during
the recent Legislative spree
The union of rye, and the union of corn,
The union of lake ice and river
The union of sugar in one spacious horn
And their unfagging union forever!
WISE AND W1rTY.-A correspondent re
ferring to the paraphrased proverb In our
last issue, "a word from the wise is suthc-
lent" pegs to know what that word is.
,Tis asked, "what word that WISE might utter,
would
Be satisfactory to all that hoard p
We wish to haze it plainly Understood
There's but one void for WISE, and-Mum s
the word
UNFORTUNATE SLURR1Na. chorister OF
country church lately made sad mistake
in the choice OF tuue, there being long
slur iI it, which came directly upon an un-
fortunate word which produced a startling
effect, namely:
"With reverence let the saints appear
And bow wow-wow before the Lord"
The clergyman's little wistit pup, hap.
pening to catch the note, sung out his treble
pipe. started the squire's old Towser's full
bass, and in an instant the whole posse o
dogs set up such chorus that Handel's hail
storm would have dwindled into mustard
seed in comparison. ..f
E Lola Motez ironically remarks to
young gentlemen
tsYou ought to know that there are four
things which always more or less interes
lady-a parrot, peacock, a monkey ano
man-and the nearer you can come il
uniting these about equally in your charac'
ter, the more will you be loved. This is G
cheap and excellent recipe for making 9
dandy, creature which is always an OBJ
;aot ~ odvn; fior N tho ladies ~
%A Young lass went to camp-meetins
and came back full of the revival which they
had, and did nothing the following weel
but sing go lo-
s'Shout shout we're gaining ground !"
She had the tune so by heart that all sh'
said was q continuation of that song, ant
not unfrequently the rhyme was too lonl
for the tune. One day when she was II
the kitchen, old Jowler slipped in and tool
a bone from off the table and as he wa
making for the door, she sung out /: fa
.'If you don't get out I'll knock you down,
Halle-Hallelujah-
You nasty, stinkin' flop cared hound, &
Oh, glory, hsllelujah - eff Hg -sa.l
--LATEST FROM PRENTIoE.-A Mississippi
letter says there is likely to be "a brusl
between two dirty Locofoco editors Of tina
State" 1t ought to be scrubbing brush
"A strolling vocalist writes to US from tn
North, asking whether he can "sing anti
slavery songs in the South" Oh, yes, and
as he will be tarred and feathered, he vii
be sure to get exactly the right pitch ~.
"A man named Drake has been arrested i
Michigan, charged with having marie
thirteen women. Nearly every widow an
maid seemed anxious to be his duck.s eiI
When the sea is of blue color it is dee
water when green, shallow.-Ezchange.
But we have seen many green fello'
get blue without becoming at all deep q
profound. sd r.. 2ai.afe.. .rsrqp sra.5
Marriage may be considered pressin
necessity. q }1us.ga& baG 3y. H., .
When public performers can't draw, the
had better Withdraw.