Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1860-08-25
Written for the Herald
CONFESSIONS OF AN OFFICE SEEK ER ~
PEEP BEHIND THE CURTAINS.

LEI DbAElAU HE AIMS
A sixteen years residence in the great
valley had fully impressed my mind VIII
the interesting fact, that the weeks and
months Immediately breeding a general
election were the mos friendly and socia-
be, and consequently the happiest Of fhe
year
When amultitude of candidates, in whom
the various callings Of life are mostly repre-
sented. are in the fell eagerly seeking fol
opportunities to beslow tokens of their ex.
uherant benesolence, in kindly Offices upon
all men.
How for time they do illustrate The
old fogy doctrine, that all men are born
equal Your real office seekers are after ALL
the true democracy of the country; the
men who reduce to practice the abstract
idea; the right Of discovery should be secu-
red to them and to their successors il
(seeking) office.
For instance, see that man of cloth and
fine linen, who had scarce even tuehed "any-
thing common or unclean," or that Other
individual whose very motion indicates 4
conscious superiority; he is evidently
thanking God that he is not like Other
men" and thinking Of his intellectual
worth, his bank stock, or his broad acres
Characters who keep to windwarl Of the la
I.oring poor.
But, '.presto change" behold the same
personages are now candidates, end rs they
pass familiarly along our streets, the digni-
feel look and stately bearing is gone; the
open palm is extended alike to rich and
poor, high or lowly, in a friendly gripe that
fairly warns ones extremities, and sets you
dreaming Of the possibilities Of universal
brotherhood.
Give them an opportunity to serve you
and you afford them a real luxury. Is not
this pure practical democracy, seeking the
greatest good Of the greatest number"
What mistake in the founders of oui
government All offices should be elected
quarterly; that we might have candidates
performing deeds ofloye and good fellowship
from one years end to another, and thus re-
moving the partition fences" and chang
ing the whole country into one vast "feld-
Elysian."
1t has been often remarked, that once a
year the man in homespun and hickory
mayif be chooses, stand On brussels carpets,
shake hands with aristocracy, and the very
atmosphere that surrounds high life !
was aware Of all this, but still lad no cor
rect, geometrical concep ion Of it, length
and breadth, its height ard depth, until
became u candidate myself, and began,
gradually at first, to lenethen my usual IA
miliar nod lwholly confined TO the head
and neck,) down, down tie spinal column,
until it became a full grown salam, most
profound, that would have been admired by
Chesterfield himself.
Then, it was BY trying to please, by
sand-papering my rough corners, ana doing
good to my neighbors, that | first caught 4
glimpse behind the curtain, and experien-
ced foretaste Of what a candidate enjoys;
and began 10 see Flty some men are al
rags seeking 05ice-purely for the luxu-
ry Of seeking.
But all this was tame indeed compared
with what followed, when as the "Ides Of
drew nigh, ! advanced from
friendly greetings, to al kinds Of neigh
borly acts, aid good Samaritan deeds
to the needy, and finally in my ardor, oyer-
the line that separates the voter
from the balance Of mankind, exhibited the
tokens If universal brotherhood, and sister
hood, and even ba55t- food; l became per-
fectly happy in tbs endeayor to make 9th
ers so.
Try it, brother candidates, "whose name
is legion don't eloctioneer BY halves, but
when YOU call on the parents Of seventeen
interesting children, don't stop at shaking
hands VIII the heads Of the family, but Va
liently kiss the little dcars one and al and
if YOU do rot experience the most inbilant
feelings during the performance Of the feat,
you certainly will at its accomplishment,
thus making the assurance Of your election
loubly sure. Yours truly,
J0HN FARMER