Union County star and Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1859-1864, 1860-10-19

licans should have all the fun, this year.
We therefore select the two following
items, as some consolation for our .'split,"
nauled, and defeated Democratic brethren
I laugh oyer.l
( krtin Lecture, bya Vide Awake Wife
ScENE-M bed, face to tie rail; strong
smell ~ coaL 0H TIME-three in the
nlorning.
A pretty time, indeed, FOR you to come
home, sir. Where have you been, all
night? You smell a. if you had been in
search of Symmes' Hole through tar
barrel. Talk Of sulphuretted hydrogen,
or superannuated eggs! they amt any
where. Say, where have you been? Here
I've been lying awake for the last iSe
hours, waiting for you to come. Now |
want to know where you have been all this
time? H'Sh l ,Coulfnt Lotter you-t.H
ne IN the morning.? wantto know now;
it's Lear enough morning to know where
ones husband has been all night, and par
ticularly if he comes home perfumed clear
through as you are. You mustn't good
EJe me-that won't answer. Suppose
you were a woman, and your husband
should go off every night in the week, and
come home as you do, and-I wish you'd
Get up and let some fresh air into the
room, or shall certainly suffocate-what
would you say? Dou'tyOu imagine there
would be row in the family? Been rith
the Vide Apdkes? l should think as
much. You're wiie-awahe fool, that's
what you are. I've always thought you
had about sense enough to parade the
streets with those d gger lovers. WY dit
marry you? That's pretty question.
Didn't you swear that you'd shoot your
self if didn't take pity on you? I'm
sorry | didu't allow you to shoot, or haug,
or drown yourself. 1t would have been
the best thing | ever did iu my life
What is it smells so? Nlhiny Don't
tell me nothing it never smeliea 50 IN the
world. H'd to carry torch.' That's
sweet business for a man who preteIIs to
be the father of large family. Next
ihins | stall expect to tear of you is, that
you We been splitting rails for general cir.
eula,ion. IknoW nottioy about p,iittcs j.?
Don't, t,eb? l don't wait to know nothing
about politics, ii have to neglect my
family and carry stiuking torches for the
benefit of lazy man III Illinois who is
trying to be President Want 10 sleep ?
/ thought you were a Wide Awake. |
suppose you've kept awake Tonight on
whiskey, haven't you? Where have you
been, all this time? Been to Tonawqnda
to raise a liberty po5e. That's swee.
note. Why didn't the Wide Awakes of
Tonawanda raise their own pole! Expect
Republicans are scarce in that section, and
you've been trying to make great spIurge.
Well, you can't fool any body. | believe
l know something about politics myself,
and know that you are drunk. That's
what you are. Must ga to slscp, must you?
Why didn', you fhiuk of that before I've I
had no sleep tonight, and you never once
thought Of me. You're brute, and just
such man as ought to vote for an old .
rail splitter. Iote far Dogyias i IEt you
alone? Eh that would te well, indeed
q change without difference, or a differ.
ence without change. Really, how con-
siderate you are. Douglas. Lincoln /. .
Lincoln ! Douglas Honest Abe - 'I.it-
tie Giant" ~ "Goodness gracious" says
Mrs Cox. "GraciOus goodness" says
Mr.. Ccx. Oh. you politiciauers will be
the death of us poor aFectionate creatures,
your much abused wives.