Pomeroy weekly telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy, Meigs County, Ohio) 1860-1866, 1860-06-19
Ilit and ddlisdunt.

VUttt utu 4OQt49MuAts
ssa- Haste to be rich, often trips up its
own heels.
RA- Love is the fever of the soul
passion its delirium.
aa Why is love like a canal boat?-
kase it is an internal transport.
What kind of ship has t,eo mates,
but no Captain? Ans Cout-ship.
B9 What goes most against farm
ers grain?-His reaping machine.
mA Query-was ever western whis-
Ky seen "Comin' through the Rye?"
n@- Ssoeet F1oaoers IN Men.ory's Urn
Our old sweet-hearts, who have married.
s@rT The poor birds are not very
bold race, and yet great many of them
die game.
paG Glorious sport, to get jolly tight
on bender, and be jolly sick for a week
thereafter.
WT The gentleman whose lips pressed
lady's 'snowy BROW did not take cold
by the operation.
sG-T The man who choked while at
tempting to swallow an inconsistency,
has fully recovered.
a.The man who stood on the brink
of despair committed suicide by throw
ing himself over.
bgI If your wife runs away, don't you
run after her. IF you do, there will be
two fools in the chase.
B@ Beer, like the flea, is naught
without hops. And again, beer is like
bear-each is brewin.
pa- What is it that no man wants, but
which, when any man has, he would not
part with for untold wealth? A bald
pate.
@ Untbankfulness is the cause of
earth unfruitfulness, says some one
Should say, mans slothfulness and mis-
rule.
B9A rejecting Irish lover says, "It's
a great pleasure to be alone, especially
when you have your sweetheart with
you"
s@- Beware of slippery sidewalks and
painted women. They are treacherous
as strong drink or an old enemy recon
ciled.
n@" "Mary," asked Charles, "what
animal dropped from the clouds?'
"The rain, my DEAR" was the whispered
reply.
sar An up-country editor has become
so witty, that his wife makes all the but
ter that his family uses from the cream
of his jokes.
a@- There is man in Northern Indi-
ana who has been married seven times
"And seven women shall lay hold on
one man, &c.
n@- The Emperor Claudius, when
woman refused to own her son, ordered
them to be married The mother
OWned-up at once.
B@ What does turkey lose by gain
ing flesh?
We give it up.
He loses his head
p@- -"Well, really, really" said SOL
dier, who had hand shot off at Cerro
Gordo, "those yellow devils have an off
hand way of doing things
Ma" "Sambo, whatdo de preachermean
by pers 'verans, in his sermint?" "Why,
it means just to hold ON and not let go,
you black niger, don't you see?'
s~It is an awful fact that more men
are drowned in the wine cup than in the
ocean; the only difference being more
publicity is given in one case than in
the other.
BDDeafJ J.ady-'What'sy your name?"
Young Laay-"Augusta Taylor
Deaf Lady-"Bless me, what name.
Bust his Biler! Eliza, you must be
making fun of me-
n@-A convention of Bloomer damsels
is reported to have resolved that they
wear short. dresses or nothing What an
orful thing it would be if they shouldn't t
wear the short dresses.
n@-ttHow came such greasy mess in
the oven?'' asked fdgety spinster of her
maid of all work. "Why," replied the
poor girl, "the candles fell into some
water, and put them into the oven to
dry"
BgA negro preacher, holding forth
to his congregation upon the subject of
obeying the commands of God, said:
'Brederin, whateber God tells me to
do in dis va book, (holding up the BIZ
ble,) dat Use gwine to do, Eff I sees in
it dat I mus jump froo stone wall Use
gwine to jump at it. Coin froo it
longs to God; jumpin at it longs to me. "
sea Can any of our readers interpret
the following superscription with which
a witty school boy lately directed his let
ter to a friend?
Wood,
John
Mass.
Fearing they may not, we give the So
Luton of the apparently senseless direc-
ton. 1t Isl: John Underwood, Andover,
Mas