Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1860-03-23
FACTS, Fun AND FANCY.

III lnB, iiho sbTOuS uTlHk, III lllne
furnishes the fairest reputation.
If you would not have affection
visit you twice, listen at once to what it
teaches.
Old boys have their playthings as
well as others-the difference is only in
the price.
= 1t is stated that none Of the leading
Charleston hotels are kept by Charleston
ians, or even by southerners.
- Let youth. who stands at the bar
with glass of liquor in his hand, con-
slider which he had better throw away
the liquor or himself.
= You, who are travelling down the
hill of life, should be very careful not to
drive too fast. Lock your wheels.
- debating club in Worcester lately
discussed the importantquestion "whether
ROSTERS knowledge of day-break is
the result of observation or instinct"
- Learning it is said, may be an in
Strument of fraud so may bread, if dis
charged from the mouth of cannon. be
IN instrument of death,
- There are deformities which attract
no peculiar attention, but a man born
without feet must necessarily be MOTTO
rious character.
- Some poor fellows have the misfor-
tune to always be the subject of practical
jokes. In such cases it is very generally
true that the but Of the joke can't see the
point of it.
- A man speaking Of place out west,
in letter which he writes home, says
that it is perfect paradise, and that
though most of the folks have the fever'n-
ager, yet it's great blessing, for it's the
only exercise they take.
Rev. I. w. Higginson defines
saiiiiice pie aas ..yery white and indieestibIc
upon the top, very moist and indigestible
.at The bottom, with untold horrors be-
tween,"
A man recently got married in Ken
lucky, one day, and hung himself the
next. No doubt he wanted 10 try all the
varieties Of nooscs, to see which be liked
best.
DIRTY HANDS. Lamb once said to a
brother whist-player, Martin Burney,
whose hands were none of the cleanest,
Martin, if dirt were trumps, what
hand you would have
=" Ma, didn't the minister say, last !
Sunday, that sparks few upward y
Yes, my dear; how came you to think
Of it," Because yesterday | saw
cousin Sally's spark staggering down the
street, and fall downward"
IA person was repeating before Mar
taiville the old maxim, "Who paws his
debts enriches himself" 'Bah p re-
piled Martaiville, =" that is an idle rumor
which creditors are endeavoring to cir
culate."
- A fellow was told at tailor's shop
that three yards of cloth, by being wet,
would shrink one quarter of a yard. |
/" Well, then" he inquired, "if you
should weta quarter of yard, would
there be any left 2"
"A DEAD Suor. The editor Of the
Alabama Flag got oifthe following squib:
Why is the editor of the Louisville
Journals career through life like cele-
brated tune? Because it is the rogues
march"
Prentice who is ',dead shot" loaded
his piece, and taking aim, let the Flag
man have it right in his teeth after the
following manner to wit:
Why will the editor Of the Flag, at
the close Of his career through life. be
like tune Of Paganini's? Because he
Will be executed on single string"
= Some heartless wretch, who should.
have been punished by being tied to a
post with his face within six inches of
kissing distance Of pair Of bewitchiug
"chcrry lips" feminine lips, with the
certainty Of never reducing that number
Of inches between him and bliss. SAYS
sup 10 cdiicu sue uccduSe man KNOWS
not the expense till he gets oue-because
they are useless without employment
because they looked best when we'll
rigged-because their value depends
upon their age--because they are upright
when in stays--because they bring news
from abroad. and carry out news from
home"
BILLIARDS PRAcrcALLy CONSIDERED
A Western journalist describes billiards
as game consisting Of two men in theil
shirt sleeves punching balls about on /
table, and presenting the keeper witt
twenty cents, or as is most commonly thu
case in this country, telling him to Jus
mark il down. This last mentioned Gus
som has given them the title Of billiars
narkers. II you have decided geniu
for the game, you win make superior
player at an expense Of about So, 900
Becksmiths. carpenters, &C., play il fo
exercise. II was invented by a shrew'
saloon keeper who was not satisfied will
the profia on whisky. and was too mucl
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