Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1860-03-30
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From the Crayon for March.
WHY YOUNG MEN REMAIN SINGL

Il.
No man of much observation or delicate an
probation of character can look into our social
circles and not discover democratic yulparitv
not much inferior to that pervading our politi-
cal cabals Our women, though smart and
Intelligent, are to prone to an ill-bred pertness
winch rather prOvokes the irregularities of the
intellect than the more elevated feelings OF the
heart. To be dependent upon our subordinate
to man IN any of the relationships OF life is to
our women a feeling of degradation, some
thing against which their natures rebel This
savage instinct of independence leads them to
shun the hoSplallties SO inSeparable from every
happy home, lest ministration of them might
Ill some way be coupled with mental attributes,
or aim the tinsel of their wardrobe, or the
gloss OF their upholstery With a good dis
position and the proper training, every woman
OF sound mind and body can be useful, while
Dat very lew can adorn or add luster to the
circles in which they move.
Great personal charms of great originality
Of mind may sometimes excuse a womans
keglect OF the more humble yet important of
nces of life, but can, however, in no way atone
for the injury which this neglect does to the
econmy Of life. Hitherto the easy ACQUISITION
OF wealth and the many new openings for the
daring enterprises of young men, have kent
our social circles from being overcrowded by
splnsters; but the times are fast approaching
when our young men will hesitate to assume
the trying obligations OF married life upon the
mere commercial prospects of making money
by risky speculations, Young men of charac.
ter and education, as in Europe, will rather
i've single and maintain their own personal
independence and dignity, than draw families
around them and become their natural slaves
Besides, the future is destined to give to cell
bacy dignity and virtue which it has not had
IN the past. 1t is for time alone to vndicate
its rights
In the growth and prosperity of clubs, in
the increasing disposition OF young men to as
sociate with each other apart from the other
sex, i'll their constant presence at places of
amusement without ladies', may be seen the
evidences of decreasing marriages and increas-
ing celbacy. This must have tanning hum.
bling effect upon women, must ween them of
their savage independence, and render them
more true to their social obligations, more
alive to the necessity Of becoming, not fgura.
lively, but really, social angels. Humility,
modcsty, diffidence, are three of the most
beautiful qualities in woman and are gener-
ally found only in natures as noble and ele-
waited by inheritance as by cultivation Our
social circles are barren and chaotic without
them; orderly, refined, and edifying with
them. They are as highly important in the
doctrines of Christianity as they are in our
secular civilization, adorn our homes as well
as our public assemblies, promote harmony
and put TO rest many OF the dscordant eIe-
ments of our natures. Our youth, however,
are very destitute of them our teachings and
practices, our social arrangements and rival
ries, our pride and ambition, are very foreign
to their growth, if not poisonous to their ma.
turity The affections Of the heart have no
outlet-have no soil to grow in--have no sus-
tenance from our superficial and materialistic
education.
In the narrow, dry and contracted counte-
nances OF our young people, in the careworn,
wrinkled and thought tangled looks, are to be
seen the ravages wrought by the vitiated con
dition Of our unusually raw social system
The black shadow of our daily obligations is
constantly resting upon us, is tretting away
the best impulses OF our lives, and disturbing
and narrowing up the midnight hours allotted
to repose. We banker after riches, we sigh
out our souls for positions, we pine for aristo-
cratic or gold-gilded connections, we shudder
at our own Loneliness when the world ceases
to be noisy around us, when our vanity is not
tlckled, when our Self-lmportance is not inflat-
ed by the circle in which we move, without
ever thinking OF the impossible gulf between
all this and our true destination as Christians
and members of civilized community. Need
we wonder, then, if the social keys seldom
yield higher tones than those relating to the
kitchen and its inmates, to the low gossip and
frivolous conduct OF certain clique OF fash
ionable gpsics?
We are glad to know our women 20 to
church, admire their ministers and partici-
pate usetully in everything pertaining to
both, but see no necessity on their part to be
constantly talking OIL the subject; but we are
glad to know they have a good doctor, good
music or art teacher, but cannot tolerate an
eternal tongue rafting about them we are
glad to know that mothers have had their
daughters highly accomplished and fathers
their sons but could do without a parental
shower Of words on the matter; we are glad
to see fine furniture, fine houses, efficient ser
wants, fashionable milners and dressmakers,
but hate all wearisome speeches and tantaliz-
ing discussions about them. The few hours
set apart for social recreation and communion
might prOftably dispense with such matters;
they are foreign to them, and ought to be del
egated to other times and places. The con-
versation OF women ought-at least, if not in
structlve-to be refreshing and entertaining
ought to cast new life into the care-worn souls
OF business and professional men. Their que
rulouSness, Their loneliness and their tawdri-
ness loosen the bonds between them and man,
and beget want OF manly sympathy for them
upon which alone they can securely rely
1t parents are not able or willing to give
marriage dover their daughters, and have them
nursed thereby in affluent ease, they ought at
least to feel the religious obligation OF giving
them good domestic training and a thorough
disciplination in everything relating to house
hold management and economy These use
full qualities are seldom without an important
bearing upon the union, happiness, and gener-
al well-being of every family, and tell power
: fully upon the prosperity and moral converse.
nion of our successors. They are as gold com
Xbared to the hashy and superficial accomplish
lments of most of our young people, and serve
as pillars of support when reverses overtake
us aad the thorns Of adversely spring up about
our pathways.
How often do the young, the dreamy, the
romantic, enter upon the stern and trying du-
ties of married lite without knowing anything
about them How often, consequently, does
marriage become the grave of all their cher
ished hopes, the prison of their idealized liber-
ties, the charnel house of their most beautiful
feelings Though woman may worship the
mundane, there is something in their immor.
tai souls which will never let them be content
with it alone ; it is their social mythology
which they must cast aside before ascending
to higher sphere Of existence and faith.