Daily Democrat and news. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1859-1864, 1860-07-19


before the people for their suffrages.
Members Of ali parties can find some
thing TO laugh at 10 some Of them. We
copy two OF them:
LIFE OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN.
BY ONE WHO KNOWS HIM.
TIE subject OF our biography was
born at Bunker Hill, on the Fourth OF
July, 1916, and was one Of the original
Sly ners of the precious document which
sealed our liberties on that day. We
refer to The Declaration of independence.
His fat er's name was Mr.. Lincpln, his
mothers Mira. Lincoln, and if he had
sisters, they were knows as the Misses.
Lincol"s. At the age Of two years,
Young Abraham commenced splitting
rails Tor living,sngipg beautiful hymns
while SO engaged, aud displaying all
those noble virtues for which be has
since been distinguished. When he
was about ten years old, Boston sudden
w become the hub Of the universe, and
required so much greasiug that cleanly
people were obliged to move away
The Lincolns went to Illinois, where
Abraham became the ablest lawyer IN
the State In less than week, and
learned tc chew tobacco-and as spec
linen OF his wit, We give the following
ANECDoTE.
On one occasion Mr.. Lincoln was
split ng u rail in the parlor of Judge
Douglas residence, when the latter joln-
cd him, aud thinking to make a good
Joke about our hero's extreme lcanness,
remarked:
"W hy, Abe You are rail YOURSELF
Mr. Lucon looked up from his work
with that sublime glare which has often
pctriied a world, End gravcly respond
ed:
You, sir, are the reverse Of rail y
Douglas Immediately grasptd his bat
and carpet bag, went to Washington,
and asked the President to explain what
Lincoln meant by that.
hy," replied the President, the
reverse Of rail is rail sp!et backwards"
Since then Douglas and Lincoln have
been warm friends.
The subject of our biography was
defeated by Mr.. Douglas for the United
States Senate in lS5S,on account of sick
ness the intanlly, has since been known
as Honest Old Abe, to the whole couu
try. lie is a man Of unflinching integ-
rity, and though he chews tobacco at
present, will not choose the Weed for a
companion if elected President.
N. B.-Thc author of this biograpby
died immediately after penning the above
work.
LIFE OF SAM HOUSTON.
BY A WELL KNOWN AUTHOR.
General Sam Houston was born a,
San Jacinto, Texas, on the 4,h Of July
1875, and whipped Mexican baby be.
fore he was half year old. At the
age Ct three years he electrified the uni
verse thus:
Having been taken by his parents t
see foot-race between two noted In
dian runners, he turned to his father
and asked:
"Why is a patron of foot-races like I
philanthropist q
81 know not, my angel boy" returned
the venerable Houston.
"Bccause," said Sam, "hc is frieno
to human progress.
After this, the family compelled hin
to wear a cold brick on his head and i
is said, that even now, while at Wash
ington, he sometimes carries the artcl,
in his hat. At the period when Texa
rose in rebellion against the Mexica s
because the latter kept getting up revo
lutions among themselves every after
noon, Mr.. Houston was chosen Genera
of the patriots, and completely defeat
ed the revolvers at San Jacinto. In con
nection with this battle, and by way O
illustrating Gen. Houston's great precis
ion Of speech: they tell an
ANEcDorE.
Toward the conclusion of the battle O
San Jacinto, a Texan Ranger dashed
frantically into tent where Houston
was asleep, and aroused him with the
exclamation of:
"Gcneral, the day is ours. 20
"You iIlitcrate fellow" exclaimed the
brave old soldier, scowling at the fright
ened fellow, "why can't you speak prop
erly? You should say the day is com.
posed of hours"
The abashed ranger mnttered some.
thing about his being soldier, and
knowing nothing about time, whercupon
Houston again reprimanded him, with
''know nothing about time, you ras.
cally scoundrel! There is but one time
that an American soldier knows any.
thing about, and that is fly time'
The Ranger deserted that light.
When General Houston was informed
that he had not been nominated by the
Charleston Convention, he pressed hi,
handkerchief to his tear-dimmed eyes,
and exclaimed hurriedly:
81 accept Go and tell the people
that ! accept for their sakes.''
Sam Houston was unanimously nom.
mated tor the Presidency by the Wash
ington Monument Convention Of this
city, and will probably receive votes in
every State except Texas. The asser-
ton that he should be nominated as
Vice President OF the Douglas ticket,
on account Of his many vices. is un-
worthy of attention for a moment.
A SUIT AGAINST Tue "GREAT EAST
ERN" DIRECToRs.-lt is said that the d.
roctOrS OF this unforfnnafa uocsol ora 70