The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1860-11-16
Anything in the world, Mr.. Smith, fiom
fighting duel to killing wild cat
You know Squire Jim Richer"

To be sure.'
Hes speculator and cheat, you know -
Your short horn COW shows that plainly
enough
That's it exactly, Simon, and to tell the
truth, don't feel over and above we'll pleas
ed about that bargain, and if l could only
get the better of the Squire in some way, l
should be delighted. I've got a plan fixed
that think will be just the thing, an all l
want is you to carry it out for me-
Say on. I'm ready for anything, if James
to be my reward
Wall, now harken. The Squire thinks
sight of nice cattle, and will give Almost any
price afore he'll lose the chance Of getting a
valuable animal. Now, want you to take
some paint-mind and get it the 'zact shade
and paint short horns white spots black just
like the rest of her. Then get sharp file
and file her horns off even with her head and
after you've got her fixed, take her into the
cars, and don't stop till you get to Boston
/ After you get there, write me letter that
you are the Earl of Derbys herdsman-an
English name takes, you know-and that
you have come to America purpose to buy
up fine cattle. Pretend you have heard of
me as ore that takes powerful interest in
the improvement of stock, ard that would
| like for me to come to Boston and see a
splendid black COW of the no horn breed,
which the Earl had sent to the mayor of Bos-
ton as a present. Just hint that, for con-
sideration, you would be willing to part with
her to any American farmer, and palm off an
inferior animal upon the mayor. Do you un-
derstand me, Mildmay?"
Perfectly sir. Go ahead
We'll, when see Squire Richer, he'll ask
me how l like that short horn, and where she
is. III tell him that my wife thinks she is
handsome critter, and that have sent her
up into Belknap county for better pasturing.
Talking of her will bring in this other affair
handy, and then will show him your letter,
and invite him to 90 to Boston with me to
see the celebrated no horn. III tell him that
I'm sot on havin' the COW, if she don't cost
more than I'm worth, and that'll make him
determined to have her himself. You must
ask an enormous price at first, but fal! down
a hundred dollars or so, just to make him
think he's cheated ye. Now, Simon, do you
think you can do the thing up brown !?
Yes, yes. IT, we'll, l believe you said
something about Jane when you first be-
gun? p
so did. Wall, if you can make ii 60,
you may have Jane before cold weather, and
the money you get for short horn will help
set you up housekeepin'. Mind, though,
and keep it all to yourself
I'll be num- And off bounded Sam to
give Jane an infinite number of busses, as he
took the foaming pals from her hand to car
ry them into the spring room.
The very next morning, before any of the
family were stirring, Simon. with the painted
COW, was on board the cars for Boston. The
next days mail brought to Smith the follow
!. ing letter:
ITO John Smith, Esq. of Rockhill, Straford
county. n. H.:
Dear Sir: beg leave to introduce my
self as William Bell, the herdsman Of the
Earl of Derby. Derbyshire, England. am
on a Journey through the United States for
the purpose of purchasing choice American
, cattle, the Earl having taken it into his head
t that mixture of the English and American
breeds is desirable. have now at the sta
, BILE on Green street magnificent black cow
: of the no horn royal stock-which my
l master has sent by me as present to his
e honor the mayor of Boston. Having heard
t through your highly respected friend, Rich
: ard Stevens, of this place, tha, you are much
0 interested in The Improvement of the Ameri
0 can stock, have thought it would do nc
t harm to dispose of this beautiful no horn te
\ you, and purchase a good American anima
for the mayor. Of course you understand
It this is in confidence. as make the offer sole
r " from the disinterested wish of serving A
d merican cattle. Ifyou should think it wortl
r your while, shall be very happy to see yo'
Il at the American House some time during tn,
h present week.
l. With the highest respect,
e Your obedient servant,
n WILLIAM BELL"
p 'Ha! ha ! ha " laughed John Smith, as h
d finished reading the note. 'Simon's in for ii
e no mistake. Good-yes, that will do. Nov
l will harness up and make an errand owe
% to the Squires after some cabbage plants
S, he said Re had slew of 'em.'
rt Mr. Smith was soon on the road behin
'e the gray mare,and on arriving at the Squire
" he found that worthy man at work in tn
garden. MIR. Smith tied up his horse an
p sprang over the fence where Richer was hoe
ID ing corn.
If 'Ah, ha! Good morning, good morning
le neighbor Smith. Glad to see you. Fin
- morning.
k. Capital; the rain night afore last did tn
ID business for the crops. Things look flourish
lis ing
u: Yes. as we'll as I've known em to be fc
j. fourteen years-corn and beans especially
or Why, Smith, the corn on my Gov'nor lot
ct up to mans hips
'Sho Well that is large. But how
as bout them cabbage plants Got any ,
| spare, eh p
IT Plenty of 'em, Mr.. Smith-there in tn;
bed. Help yourself. 0h,' latter brie
ry pause,) 4 forgot to ask you about the cow
er How do you like her p
First rate, Squire, but our pasturing is
I1l poor, that I've sent her up to Alton to n
tn brother to be pastured-bis pasturing is ne
a land. you know, and the clover knee deep, |
says. was afraid if kept her here she
do kinder lose her flesh, and run down, SO T.,
let him have her for the season, and he's
Mt allow me for the milk and butter
ng The Squire looked somewhat surprised
this favorable account of the Durham Ches
1r. ire short horn, but he only said Just as
to thought, Mr.. Smith. l knew you'd be plea
to ed with the cow
in There was long pause, during viii
Smith was industriously uprooting cabba
he plants and transferring them to his basket.
ad At length, as if struck with new idea,
m called out Look here, Squire, I'm gc
mind to tell you little bit of secret l
int you think you could keep still about it p
'Sartin. Land me- can keep anything