The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1860-12-22
ouNCIL BLUFFS. IOWA, SATURDAY. DECEMBER ls6os

DECEMBER %, ri 060s
and. sta,siEE into al cred position, IS,
frubsed hsre eye., settled her cap border, ,aus
te1ci Aimsds ssfs asgq4s sEzs q = Sasszs -
f.-s. Bisss saSs soui, Hst.y, ~has ,vss thai
Some hedy as the door Z " ha can be con
! ins hsse at Ibis time Of night IS
ssfs's not late, mosber-oniy a4ittfe pxsi
] seieht. ufll- go md seA Ghos 10 isya'asss,
Hs.ts, dsnarsly sakiaE thseeaSis tssa s.,
..so. Here, JON Wind up my BAH and
: Iswe-pur the hearth, whfie Il 70 tcf ne door, =
sssys the old hay, vsese fsss wsssstrueslies
in the perplexing zmes hesrof The unra veled
yarn. aDrat that oat - s-.4f .. 4 ,,.s.s -
! And all this time josiah vas standing on
one foot cns on the old porch, with bis
bhasdsip his oErrcest pockets, wondefisg Il
Hetty had fallen sslecp. aud every new and
riAen giving ths door ? smart rap byaxsy Of
iwI Ii her hurry, MS. Thomas Y5rsottS fatt
the Candle, and ~ she stepped out into the
little frsnt entry, the sitting room doci
slammed after her. She had hss haedson
the handle of the hall door as the memeot,
and opening it she suddenly found herself
in the embrace of d stout pair of Arnss: q
whiskera face in. close praxinity to bar
own; and befcre she could thipk sabo at Abs
s.rangeness Of her situation, she received a
proion ged kss-a hearty SMACK foil Upon
bar yirtnous mstrans lips. S&gsa=sasa
| so. murder 'Taipi obadiah, ,neithsrt +
She had by this time Giyestea herself oi
fths impression that It was her usually sobe.
spouse who must hare Gene home in m
sunusually exalted condition, thus to indulge
in such unw0nted, expressionssef asIeciior.
4 "Get out! Get out, | say! Who are
you, any how? Murder! thieves Hetty
come here. Here's man kissing me ike
tmadl', r a@a&~
Bu. the intruder had BY t..is time discov-
Fersd his missase-it did no. need tic indig-
nn1lt pumfneiing ard scratching Of the old
lads's vigorous fsts to cause him to reiin-
quish bis hold. and fy as il pursued By some
findgnant ghost. ssss sssz
t. Hetty, nearly choking with emotaercd
laughter, in spite of her trepidatiop, now
came to the rescue.
'aI never was so frightened in aH my life.
sIhe mean scamp / Who cpuld it be? Hetty
have yeu any idsa?' ,,.sss-asgs rs5.sa Ygsss
[ But that dutifu! daughter was, to oil ap-
Irearauec, inh5cent as q sucking dove. She
Esosthed the old Indy BY representing that ii
might have been one OF the neighbors whe,
having drank too mucn, had mistaken tho
house and the housewife. She searchedsthe
entry for the missing spectacles, dropped in
ktbe scuifie; rearranged the fnmpled cap
border; wound up the tangled yarn; stirred
the fre-au in the most aniab!e manner
possible; and at length had the satisfaction
rE a., lrp otka e,,k ~ n har Oh ~
and her accustomed tranquility. '9s53S
! Mrs. Thomas Was fully awake nov. She
had q new .ijsa in her head, and instead of
settling herselis for another nap, che pur-
sued the train Of thought and her knitting,
both at the same time, with wonderful ra-
pidity. AT length, stopping and looking
koenly at Hetty- .sai.z sad
Il suppose it's queer idea Of mine,
Hetty, but I've notion that man was
'Siah Hawley.v Niy! but if Hetty's face
i did not FIRE up then! You might have lit q
i candle BY it. These ipcipient symptoms did
not escape the vary inquistor."
y" Pears so to me. 'Cause those big
whiskers were so much like his'n, and the
awkward way he gripped me with his great
pawsw .s.-,....-,3..-..s- st.,. .s.s~-
IIetty was wonderfully busy. She bent
over her work and drew the needle through
50 quickly that the thread snapped, and
then she was so much engaged in lhreading
her peedle again, che didn't have time to
answers "a -
81 don't believe that kiss vas meant for
me, aftersali. Wonder sciso twas intended
4 for; and wonder if you don't know something
about it, He,ty." ... ...-.. ,,.z 1888
eyes, you Resfy. You was mighty anx-
ious to get me and pap of to Aunt Ruth's 8
4 this evening: but noticed you were slicked
I up extraordinary, for al you wer'nt going.
/ .ss.New, Hssty, In. gettin', old, know it;
/ but hav'n. quite lost my eye-sight yet.
I've heard something about this between
| you and Siah Hawiey. What ars rou playin'
possum fur? i0at with it, l say II aaza 3a
/ Our little schemsr thus ahjured, made .
clean breast Of gythe matter, much relieved
to find tha. mother sshaii'nt anuthin' ngin
him.. and uonld "give father a tn.k about
il, aud bring him rounap gsr&s !. eqlssEns a
4 sEut, Hetty, want you to tell ,Sial I'd
rather bed not make such a mistake agin.
I don't Ike the feel D: his big vhi.kers
about my face, don't approve Of pronis-
cuous kissiug."' s. ..ess. ~ .easyse 80 %
'Siah never, heard the last of that blum.
| der. Old Squire Thomas used to delight 10
rehearsing the q. dry whenever allthe PARTIES
| interested happened to be present. He
would shake bis fat sides at Josiah's dis-
comsture and his wife's tart replies, AMI
Hetty would Join him, and both would laugh
until the tears ran down their cheeks 80
;ssNessr mind, Siah,'' Mrs. Thomas would
say scspsolingly.- s.Le. him laugh. He'd
havo been only too glad TO have been in
4 1,na 80 had
| hard work 10 get q kiss from me, then. And
I hopegi IL will be lesson to you and Hesty,
agin the impolicy of coacealmsut, and nm
der hand doin's Of all sorss.'' vss.s ii
a4fy Whoever undessakss TO put joke on
the razor-strop man is sure to get aoofed 10
the long run. Recently, while, selling his
strops at Plymouth, and expatiating, the
whifeor The evils OF rum drinking, tipsy
fellow cried,cus, ssIf drinking run made nj
lie IS fast % you do selling your strops, I'D
quit il to day."-ssEery good,o replied The
/ strop, seller; ssthe only difference between
I your lying and mine Is this my strops ers-
bas me TO tielin good wHm bed, whiisyu rum
makes you lie In the suttsr. SrsE ssi .e ss.g
Il GA country apothecary, not q little dis
tinguished for his impndence, with hops OF
disconcerting q young clergyman, whom be
knew to be man ofsingular nodessy, asked
him, in the hearlpg Of . large company,
l"Wby The patriarchs Of old lived to such an
extreme age ~ 70 which tie e!ergymar
replied, 81 suppose the ancient pssriafsAa
took no physic."
ta-eas .-.-4.--l---> s--.------.k
4 ga supespsmsrary vas ones iutfusted
IN ,deiixAe fha fallaNinR nnA4sa1a 10 Lord