Cincinnati daily press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1860-1862, 1860-04-17
Oh, MIR. Jones pan Adventure In the
Cars

Oug tAI' So"S" -. - = 49,
There were FIVE of us--yes, FIVE as happy
fellows as were ever let loose from college.
II was vacation, and We concluded to take
trip to the Falls. We got aboard at ~,
and were soon travelling rapidly toward our
destination . ..... ...... .. T..
. We had Just seated ourselves and prepared
fora comfortable smoke, when in came the
conductor, and who should it be but our old
Fred B.. After the common salutations
"How are you, old fellow" &C., had passed.
Fred remarked he had some business for US
TO attend to. ....
"Out with it, old chum,' said we; "any-
thing at all will be acceptable, so let US have
it, ..s...-,- ~ ..-..f -
9Well, boys" said Fred in very conf
Dental tone, "in that next car there is as
loving pair as was ever my lot to see. They
are going down to A. to get married,
and now if you can have any fun over it,
lust pitch in. They must be cared for, and
! don't know who can do it better than
YOU" .-5t -..-.Jrr. rr.rH..-R ...
D. In moment Fred was gone, and we set
our heads together to form plan for taking
care Of the lovers"
II have it, boys" said Bill Sewers; "we
must make that girl think that her lover is
married. .
GThat's it, Bill Seevers-that's it," said
we, not giving him time to finish the SEN
tence.
''That he is a married man and the father
of children" said Bill.
''Thats the game, boys now let us play it."
1t devolved upon me to commence opera
tions. Accordingly | entered the car in
which we were Informed the lovers were.
The girl thinking, | suppose, that she must
give her lover all the seat had taken q seat
on his knee; and he, for the purpose of pro-
tecting her, of course, had thrown his arm
around her waist; and so they sat, in real,
soft loving style.
All this 1 gathered at a glance. Stepping
'"Why, Jones, what in the deuce are you
doing with this girl?p -W-Hg
The girl arose hastily, and seated herself
on the seat. E.E-
''See here, stranger" said the fellow, ',you
are mite mistaken; my name amt Jones'"
''Why, Jones.p said /, ''you certainly have
not left your wife and children, and tried to
palm yourself off for a single man, have
you?" ..-..... ..
~ tell you my name amt Jones, it's Har-
per. 1t never was Jones; faint goin' to
merely shook my head, and passed on to
another seat, to see the rest of the fun. The
girl looked wild after | sat down; but
Jones alias Harper soon convinced her that
was mistaken. ....
About the time they got to feeling quite
well again, in come Ell Gregg. Walking up
to Harper, he accosted him with
"Why, Jones, you here how did you
leave your wife and babies2" III. D.,
Z. Now, see here, stranger, you amt the tust
man that's called me Jones to-day, an must
look awfully like him; but amt Jones.
hain't got wife, nor babies either, but thii
'ere gal an me is goin' to splice, and ther
YOU can talk about my wife, and | wouldn't
wonder but what in the course of time you
might talk about the babies, too; but you
nnusp'{ oalI mo JOnaaD "
This retort brought forth vociferous laugh.
ter from the spectators, and it also brought
blushes to the face of "the gal that was gOin
to be spliced." 80 -
this in the future. l really pity your poo
wife and children and this poor girl"
$50, Mr.. Harper, your real name is Jones
is it, an you have been foolin' me, have you
Well, we amt spliced yet; and don't thinl
1r we will be very soon," said the young girl
and her eyes fairly flashed with fire.
"Ja4e, Jsne,| SEs said, said Harper, don't 70.
drop Of Jones blood in me, and III prove it,
At this moment, JEFF jackson, Bill Sewers
and Jim Byers entered, and of course thei
attention was called to Harper by his lou
talking They stepped up to him and sale
why, Jones, what is all this fuss about2
This was more than Harper could stanC
He leaped upon seat.
"Now," said he, "my name amt Jone
and can lick any feller that says it is"
By this time we had got to A., an
Fred came into the car and made Bill Harpe
keep quiet. The girl that wouldn't b
'splieed' requested Fred to help her on IL
train that was going back to n, whic
he did, and the notorious Bill Jones, alii
Harper followed. We heard afterward th
be proved himself to be Bill Harper instea
of Bill Jones, and he and his gal got "spliced
--------HA.----------
----- SULPHITE OF LIMR,-Sulphite Of lime WI
first introduced 70 the notice Ofthe America
public by Professor Horsford, of Cambrdp
University, about two years ago. Probabl
no notice Of II will be found in Buchanan
treatise. .--- .--,
II has been abundantly tried in this vicinit
this fall, upon cider and with the happie
- results. 1t would undoubtedly do as mut