Pomeroy weekly telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy, Meigs County, Ohio) 1860-1866, 1860-11-16

aa- Some authors tell US I" that much
is said about the tongue" True, it i!
in everybody's mouth.
=" Pa, ain I growing tall ?" "Why
what's your Light, boy p I" Seven feet
lacking a yard" Pa fa;uted.
wSomebody haa discovered tha
when a betting man says, he'll take you
he means, that if he can, he'll take yo'
iEl
sa-A lady, in reply to some guests
who praised the mutton on her table
said, "Oh yes, my husband always buys
the best; he is great epicac."
aa A young lady down east adver
tises for the young man that embraced
an opportunity, and says if he will come
over to their to 1n he can do better.
E~A sailor looking very serious in a
chapel, with his hands in his pockets
was asked by the minister if he felt any
change? "Nary red, said Jack.
RS Diplomas are not always worth.
lily bestowed. A sheepskin is eften ia.
ken from the animal that is entitled to
it, to be given to an animal that isn't
Some one remarked to Mrs. Sid.
dons that applause was necessary to ac
tors, as it gave them confidence
"More, y replied the actress, ''it gives us
breath"
s@A footman, proud of his grammar
ushered into the drawing-room a Mr.
Foote and his two daughters, with this
Introduction: "Mr. Foote and the two
Eisses Feet"
B9"An old man makes love at dis.
advantage. 1t must be very amorous
sort of wink that can captivate through
pair of spectacles. Not at all-gold
speetacles could come it!
pgA ''lovyer" may imagine himself
to be -carded when he sees another
name on the wedding cards, and his n
minus! His natural exclamation, OF
course, will be: "What's a-miss?"
p5TA "nice young man." in CONVEX
sation one evening, CHANGED to remark,
81 am no prophet
'True," replied lady present, emo
profit to yourself or any one else!''
p@s Why is a young lady preparatory
to dressing in her criroline, like -four
barrel?
Because the hoops have to be raised
before the head will 60 in.
sa- A soldier on sentry was noticed
by his officer with having black eye,
and who charged him with fighting.
G. Please, sir" replied the soldier,
wasn't it for that purpose you engaged
me ?''
g9 An Irish post-boy having driven
a gentleman long stage during tor
rents of aain, the gentleman civllly said
to him. "Are you not very wet?'
"Arrah! l don't care about being
very wet; but, plase your honor, I'm
very dry"
nA- -"Clara,' - said Charles, "did poor
little Carlo have a pink ribbon round
his neck when you lost him?" eyes,
yes, the little DEAR" replied Clara
"Have you seen him?' NO, not ex-
actly; but here's piece of pink ribbon
in the sausage"
ma An insane man in Ogle, Illinois,
a clergyman as he was leaving
the pulpit, and beat him severely. AS
the lunatic SMASHED the clergyman
nose, ,he told the people if they wanted
to see salvation flow, look!''
psA- An Indian and a white man were
passing along Broadway, when the
former espied a window full of wi gs, and
pointing to the owner, who was standing
in the doorway, said "Ugh-him
great man big brave take many
scalps!''
pa- Abu-H -Horaiah was making a daily
visit to the Prophet Mustufa Moham-
med, who said to him" Oh, Abu-M Mo-
riah, let me alone every other day, SO
to that affection may increase that is,
come not every day, that we may get
more loving
mLJones had been to champagne
party, and returned home at late hour
He had hardly gotin the house when the
clock struck four. Cone one-one-
one!" hiccuped Jones. Il say, Mrs.
Jones, this clock is out Of order; it has
struck one four times.
asa-George III, speaking to Arch
bishop Sutton, respecting his large fam
lily, made the remark, II believe your
Grace has better than Dozen" mo,
SIRE" replied the Archbishop, comfy
eleven. " "Well," replied the king,
"isn't that better than dozen?"
EE- Mr.. Justice Page was renowned
for his harshness and terocity upon the
bench. While going the circuit, face
tious lawyer, named Crowle, was asked
if "the Judge was not just behind?''
II don't know" said Crowle, ''but if
he is, am sure he was never just be-
fore"
p@A young lawyer of Philadelphia
wrote to an old limb Of the law near
Chicago, which read thus:
ais there an opening in your part of
the country, that l can get into?''
Answer-"There is an opening in my
back yard, about thirty feet deep, no
curb around it. If it will suit, come
on"
na.A shopkeeper purchased of an
1rishwoman quantity of butter, the
Jumps of which, intended for pounds, he
in the balances and found want
ing. "Shure it's your own fault if they
are light" said Biddy, in reply to the
of the buyer; it's your own
fault, sir, for wasn't it with round, of
your own soap 1 bought here my self
that / weighed Il em with" The shop
keeper had pothi G to say on that sub
ieet.