Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1860-12-07
THE HANDSOME MAN.

both bis parents that they resolved 10 ruin
him; accordingly, he was exceedingly spoiled,
never annoyed by the sight Of book, and
had as much plum cake as he could eat. Hap
py would il have been for Mr.. Ferdinand Fitz-
roy could he always have eaten plum cake,
and remsined a child.
most beautiful creature was Mr.. Ferdi-
nand Fitzroy, Such eyes-such hsir-such
teeth-such n fgure-such manners, too-and
such an irresistible way of tying his neck
cloth When he was about sixteen, a Grabbed
old uncle represented to his parents the pro-
priety Of teaching Mr.. Ferdinand FitEroy to
read and write. Though not without some
difficulty, he convinced them-for he was ex-
ceedingby rich, and riches in an uncle are
wonderful arguments respecting the nature of
a nephew whose parents have nothing to leave
him. So our hero was sent to school. He was
naturally n very sharp, clever boy; and he
came on surprisingly in his learning The
scbooftnaster's wife liked handsome children.
"What genius will Master Ferdinand Fitz-
roy be, if you take pains with him 20 said she
TO her husband.
Pooh, my dear, 1t is no use to take pains
with him"
And why, love-"
'Becsu'o he is a great deal too handsome
ever to be a scholar"
"And that's true enough, my dear" said
the schOolmaster's wife.
So, because he was too handsome to be a
scholar, Mr.. Ferdinand FitzrOy remained the
lag of the fourth form. They tOek our hero
from school.
What profession shall he follow ?" said his
mother.
My first cousin is the Lord Chancellor"
said his father; ''let him 90 to the bar" The
Lord Chancellor dined there that day. Mr.
Ferdinand Fitzroy was introduced to him.
His lordship was little, rough-faced, beetle
brOwed, hard-featured man, who thought that
beauty and idleness was the same thing-aud
parchment skin the legitimate complexion
for lawyer.
Send him to the bar" said he; no, no,
that will never do-send him into the army, he
is much too handsome to become lawyer"
And that's true enough, my lord, said the
mother. So they bought Mr.. Ferdinand Fitz-
roy cornetcy in the - regiment Of dra-
gOOns. Things are not learned by inspiration.
Mr.. Ferdinand Fitzroy had never ridden at
school, except when he was hoisted; he was,
therefore, very Indifferent herseman; they
sent him to the riding school, and everybody
laughed at him.
He is an ass ;" said Cornet Horsephiz who
was very ugly. GA horrid puppy" said 1t.
st. Squintem, who Was still uglier. :" If he
does not ride better he will disgrace the regi-
ment, said Captain Rivalhate, who was very
good looking - If he does not ride better, we
will cut him." said Captain Eyerdrill, who
was wonderful martinez Il say, Mr.. Bump
enwell, (tO the riding mastery make that
youngster ride less like miller's sack. "
Pooh, sir, he will never ride better"
''And why will he not ~
Bless, you, Colonel, he is a great deal too
handsome for a cavalry officer
True" said Cornet HOrsephiz. Very
true" said Lieut.. St. Squintem. We must
cut him. said the Colonel. And Mr.. Ferdi-
nand Fitzroy was accordingly cut.
Our here was youth of susceptibility-he
quilted the - regiment, and challenged the
Colonel. The Colonel was killed. "What a
terrible blackguard is Mr.. Ferdinand Fitz-
roy said the COlonel's relations.
Very true" said the world. The parents
were in despair. They were not rich; but our
hero was an only son, and they sponged hard
upon the grabbed old uncle :. He is very
clever" said they both, " and may do yet. ~
So they borrowed some thousands from the
uncle. and bought his beautiful nephew seat
in Parliament.
Mr. Ferdinand FitIroy was ambitious, and
desirous Of retrieving his character. He fag-
ged like a dragon, cOnned pamphlets and re-
views, and made notes on the English cOnsti-
ntion. He rsse up to speak.
What handsome fellow" whispered one
member
"Ah, q eoxcOmb," said another.
Never do for a speaker" said third, very
audibly. And the gentleman on the opposite
benches sneered and heGTed! Discouraged by
his reception, Mr.. Ferdinand Fitzroy grew .
little embarrassed Told you SO, said one
of his neighbOrs.
Fairly broke down" said another.
Too fond Of his hair to have anything in
his head" said third, who was considered 1
wit.
Hear. hear" cried the gentlemen on the
opposite benches.
Mr. Ferdinand Fitzroy sat down-he had no
shOne; but, in justice, he had not failed. MANY
frst-rate speaker had begun worse, and mani
n country member had been declared phenil
of promise upon half his merit. " Your Adon
- sa.l h.
with Wlry nose
Nor man of business either" added tn
chairman Of committee, with a face like
kangaroo's.
Poor devil" said the civilest Of the set
=. he's deuced deal too handsome for a speak
will never do; we must cough him down.
And Mr.. Ferdinand Fftzroy was accordingl.
oOughed down.
Our hero was now seven or eight and twen
ty, handsomer than ever, and the alteration o
all the young ladies at Almack's. We hav
nothing to leave you" said the parents, VIII
had long spent their fortune, and now lived ol
the credit Of having once enjoyed it. g Yo
are the handsomest man in London; you mus
marry az heiress." 80 o..
'sI will,'' said Mr.. Ferdinand Fitrroy.
Miss Helen Conyolyulus was charmin
young lady, with hare lip and six thousand
year To Miss Helen Convolyulus then on
hero paid his addresses. Heaven, what an up
roar her relations made abont the matter
Easy 10 see his Intentions said one; g
handsome fortune hunter, who wants to max
the best of his person"
..Handsoms is that handsome does, !" saiC
another. IA .fs. .r e.
- He was turned out Of the army, and mur
dered his colonel,
He can admire none but himself" said
fourth mn ..--r-, ca. -. T.. &. 81 ...r
Make you perpetuaiiy jealous" said
fifth. 49, -F-l-
"Spend your fortune" said a sixth.
. And break your heart, said seventh.
Miss Helen Conyolyulus was prudent an
wary. She saw a great deal Of justice in whs
was said; and was sufficiently contented wit
liberty and six thousand year not to be highl
impatient for a husband; bat our heroine ha
aversion to lover, especially so handsom
lover as Me- Ferdinand Fitzroy. According
she neither accepted nor discarded him, bt
kept him on hope, and suffered him TO get int
debt with his tailor and his cOachm aker on Il
strength Of becoming Mr.. Pitzroy Convolvulu
Time went on, and excuses and delays wei