Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1859-02-05
MIR. BROWNS MIsHAPs.


ty five or Whereabouts; one of those men who
seem to be born to pass through the world
alone Save this popularity, there was moth
ing to distinguish Mr.. Brown from the multi
tude of other Browns who are born, grow up,
and die in this world of ours.
1t CHANGED that Mr.. Brown had occasion to
visit town some fifty miles distant on mat
tiers of business. 1t was his first visit to the
place, and he proposed stopping for day, in
order to give himself an opportunity to look
about
Walking leisurely along the street, he was
all at once accosted by child of five, who ran
up to him exclaimng-
Father, want you to buy me some more
candy"
"Father!' was it possible that he, bachelor,
was addressed by that title He could not
believe it.
"Who were you speaking to, my dear?" he
inquired of the little girl.
Il spoke to you, father" said the little one,
surprised.
Greatly" thought Mr. Brown, "this is en-
barrassing p
II am not your father, my dear" he said;
"what is your name?"
The child laughed heartily, evidently think
ing it good joke.
"What funny father you arer she said
"but you are going to buy me some candy"
eyes, yes, I'll buy you pound, if you won't
Call me Iatner any more SAID Brown, ner-
vously.
The little girl clapped her hands with de-
light. The promise was all she remembered.
Mr.. Brown proceeded to a confectionery
store, and actually bought pound OF candy
which he placed in the hands of the little girl.
In coming out of the store they encountered
the child's mother
ooh, mother p said the little girl, Gust see
how much candy father has bought for me-"
tfYOu shouldn't have hnuUht har r11unl
at time, Mr.. JONES'" said the lady. II am
afraid she will make herself SICK But how
did you happen to get home SO quick? | did
not expect you till night"
"Jones-I-madame, said the embarrassed
Mr.. Brown, otis all mistake; | amt Jones
at all; it isn't my name. l am Eliphalet
Brown of W, and this is the first time |
ever came into this city"
Good Heavens Mr. Jones, what has put
this silly tale into your head You have con-
cluded to change your name, have you? Per
haps it's your intention to change your wife z"
Mrs Jones's tone was now defiant, and this
tended to increase Mr.. Browns embarrass-
ment.
81 havn't any wife, madam; l never had
any. On my word, as gentleman, never was
married"
"And do you intend to palm this tale off
upon me?" said Mrs. Jones, with excitement.
of you are not married I'd like to know who
am 2"
81 have no doubt you are most respectable
lady" said Mr. Brown, "and conjecture, from
what you have said, that your name is Jones
but mine is Brown madam, and always was"
Melinda saidher mother suddenly taking
her child by the arm, and leading her up to
Mr.. Brown, Melinda, who is this gentleman 2"
"Why, that's fatherp' was the child's i'm
mediate reply, as she confdingly placed her
hand in his.
"You hear that Mr.. Jones, do you? You
hear what the innocent child says and yet you
have the unblushing impudence to deny that
you are my husband The voice of nature,
speaking through the child, should overwhelm
you. I'd like to know if you are not her faith
er, why are you buying candy for her? /
would like to have you answer that But /
presume you never saw her before in your
life"
81 never did. On my honor, Inever did l
told her would give her the candy if she
wouldn't call me father any more"
"You did, did you? Bribed your child not
to call you father? Oh, Mr.. Jones, that is in
famous Do you intend to desert me- sir, and
leave me to the cold charities of the world
And this is your first step 2"
Mrs. Jones was so overcome that without
any warning, she fell back upon the sidewalk in
a tainting fit.
Instantly number of persons ran to her as
sstance.
as your wife subject to fainting in this
way9" asked the first conner of Brown.
81 don't know" said Mr.. Brown. "She
isn't my wife. / don't know anything about
her"
"Why, it's Mrs. Jones, amt it 2"
eyes, but I'm not Mr. Jones'"
"Sir," said the first speaker, sternly, "this is
.. no time to jest l trust that you are not the
Ncause of the excitement which must have oc-
1casioned your wifes fainting fit You had bet
Ner call coach and carry her home directly"
Poor Brown was dumbfounded.
wonder, thought he, whether it's possible
that I'm Mr. Jones without knowing it. Per-
htaps I'm really Jones, and have gone crazy Ia
consequence of which / fancy that my name is
BROWN. And yet don't think Pm Jones. In
spite of all will insist that my name is Brown.
"WeSl, sir, what are you waiting for 1t is
necessary that your wife should be removed at
once. Will you order carriage2"
BrownNsaw that there was no use to prolong
the discussion by denial. He therefore, with
out contestkng the point, ordered hackney
coach to the spot.
Mr.. Brown accordingly lent an arm to Mrs.
Jones who had somewhat recovered, and was
about to close the door upon her.
why, are you NOT going yourself7"
"Why, no, why should l %
"Your wife shouldN not go alone, she has
hardly recovered"
Brown gave despairing glance at the crowd
around him, and deeming it useless to make
opposition where so many st,,med thoroughly
convinced that he was Mr. JoG IS, followed the
lady in.
dWhere shall drive 2" said the whip.
T-I-I-don't know" said Mr.. Brown
"Where would you wish to be carrieG2"
"Home, of course" murmured Mrs. Jones'
IL do not know" said Brown.
"No. 10 H street." said the gentleman
already introduced, glancing contemptuousb
at Brown.
"Will you helpme out, Mr.. Jones 2" said the
lady II am not fully recovered from the
fainting fit into which your cruelty drove me-
care you quite sure that l am Mr.. Jones.fV
asked Brown with some anxiety.
"Of course" said Mr.. Jones.