davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
Exerueiating.

Scene In front of Fashionable
Hotel. Gentleman dismounting from hi,
Horse.
Gentleman. Stabler, attend Re.
frigerate my beast, by allowing him twice
to circumambulatc yonder fountain; that
accomplished, to imSibe moderate quan.
/ tity of aqueous particles conduct him
with care to the repository for wearied
beasts, and having clothed in lustre his
dirty skin, by gentle application of the
vegetable material commonly called straw,
suffer him to partake of food which shall
afford rourishnent and gentle repose."
'StaJteT = dangling. - W-h-a-t,
.ir ?"
GentlemaR-"What, sir! Stand You
thus like one who has no reason in his
soul, while this poor beast, whose every
pore is font of gushing strength. grows
valetudinary meath Soils oppressive rays?
Ye volatile barbarian !"
StqJler-(L Laughing still more unre-
STRANGELY. III can't understand word
you say, sir but suppose you want
your horse put up"
Gentleman" Stupidity unequalled
Landlord, illuminate yonr censures against
this tarly churl, who thus manifests op-
pugnation to my desires, and conduct me
to secluded apartments, anil bring restor-
ativeS of the most vivifc character, to re-
instate to their former power the varied
energies of my exhausted frame"
Landlord-( Laughing. ID will, sir. :"
Gentleman. =" Preposterous And
you. sir, unite in the disgraceful merri-
ment of your minion !! should surmise
myself the first of the species you ever
beheld."
misunderstanding still more. y
" Indeed You are, SIR
GentlemdR.-" Terminate this prolix
scene, and oficiate as guide to my apart
ments. At the hour of dining, summon
me; if wearisomencss shall have caused
me to be recumbent in posture, gently re-
animate me with the breath of fam"
SCENE 2.-The Dining Room. Gen
aenaan seating himself at the table; dinner
over, and others standing IN the room.
Gentleman.-"I should Judge voracity
anil ignorance prevailing characteristics
of the man. | see nothing among these
reeking ruins worthy the regard of gen.
tleman's palate. Waiter, 1 desire fe-
male fowl, sufficiently, but not redun-
dainty made edible by fire."
1t is brought.
Waiter, dissect with care the same :;
do not violently separate the parts, lest
my joints should suffer dislocation from
the discordant sounds"
1t is done.
Waiter, place tender portion of the
breast upon my plate, with the necessary
Accomplishments"
1t is done as ordered, and the gentle
man commences his dinner.
n wag, who, with others, had wit
messed these proceedings, seats himself
at the table opposite our hero.
Wdg.-" Waiter, furnish me with a fe-
male fowl"
The waiter understands the joke, and
does as he is bid.
Waiter, discover now her component
parts"
1t is done.
Waiter. divide those parts into por-
tons suited to labial capacity"
Opening his mouth, and throwing him
self back on the chair.
" Waiter, place one Of them in the orr
flee before you."
Our hero begins to understand the
quiz. and is evidently much disconnected.
Waiter, rag .Dey jars
Amid roars of laughter, and curses up
on his lips, our hero rushes from the room.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

TEkNs:-One copy one year, 50; one copy
six months, 81; FIVE copies six months, 81; ten
copies months, So; ten copies twelve months
SIS; fifteen copies twelve months, so; twenty
copies twelve months, 500, in advance.
Specimen copies sent gratuitously for inspec.
rion. Southern and Western money, or Post.
age Stamps, taken for subscriptions. Letters
should be directed to MUM & CO.,
l2s Fulton Street, New York.
OF Messrs. Mum & Co. are extensively en-.
gagged in procuring patents for new inventions,
and will advise inventors, without charge, in
regard to the novelty of their improvements.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
GEORGE P. LUCKHARDT,
Matchmaker, and Dealer in
WATCHES, CLOCKS & JEWELRY
ORRnON HOLT Cn No

NATCHES, CLOCKS IL JEWEBRY,
OREGON, HOLT CO., MO-,
TAKES the liberty to inform the citizens OF
l. White Cloud and vicinity, that he has
opened a Watch, Clock and Jewelry Store in
Oregon, Holt County, Missouri, where he will
keep constantly on hand, and for sale, good
assortment Of Gold and Silver Watches, Clocks
and Jewelry, which he will sell extremely low,
for Cash. Also, fine lot of Violins, Accorde-
ons, Silver and Plated Spectacles, Gold Peas,
with Gold and Silver Extension Cases, Silver
Thimbles, &C., &c.
He is prepared to repair Watches, Clocks and
JeWelry Of every description. in the best manner,
and on the most reasonable terms.
Every article bought in his establishment, is
warranted to be what they are represented to
be. Watch repairing warranted for one year.
june 4, ST, If.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
Gbe Kansas Cbltt,
IS PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY, d
SOL. MILLER, Editor and ProPris''''
WHITE CLOUD, KANSAS.
TERMs-$2 per Year, in Advances
PArEs az AnvERTIsING.

RATES OF ADVERTISING A
I square, 40 lines or lsss,) one week. 50
Each additional insertion, ,sDs
/ square. one year, IA
Business Cards, Of 5 lines or less. year, =, =.
Liberal deductions will be made to tho'' -
advertise by the year, IN n,
The privileges of yearly advertiser y. u5;,,,
confined exclusively to their own inn
business. s..,l,.
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ment, Dissolution and Petition NOTICE. u.
announcing Candidates for Office, sSVV'
vance. t..,,d
Displayed advertisements will be 'h
an extra price. ot,s.
Communications ola personal NATURE 100 %
licited; but if admitted, they will be in's''
advertisements, at S2.00 per square; s,,,uJ
Advertisements received, not maFheo .-.,;,usl
specified number of insertions, will be CT,
until ordered out, and charged aecorGlns;SI s
All transient advertisements mus
strictly in advance. .5,,ss,I
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The above regulations will be IN q. iI.onlras.
idly adhered to, unless varied by speeisi sIses-
DJob Printing, Of every deserPa
ted in the best style, upon short nOu'
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
Horses and Stables.

Blindness is very common among hor-
ses in our cities. This is caused in a
great measure by keeping them in dark
confined stables, and shading their eyes
with harness binders. Dark, ELEVENTH
ated cellar stables are quite common
this stupid practice should be abolished,
because such stables are very detrimental
70 the health Of these noble animals. All
stables should be dry, roomy structures,
provided with windows to afford abundant
light, and should be frequently whitcwash-
ed. The horse is a native Of dry, sunny
regions, and requires to be kept dry and
warm in order to attain to the greatest
perfection.
Close and confined stables. Just like
those which are so common, are the fire.
'quent cause of that violent disease called
CHAMBERS. A few years since, great rava-
ges were committed among the cavalry
horses of France by this disease, but it is
now aiwost unknown in that country.
This result has been brought about by
simply making larger stables. doubling
the size of the stalls, and securing good
ventilation. In proportion to their bulk,
horses need more fresh air than men, in
order to perform the function of respira-
tion. yet they are commonly cooped up
in narrow stalls which are not large
enough to keep a dOrmOuse's lungs at
w6rk.
As the season is now approaching
when. owing to Indictment weather, horses
will be more confined indoors, those who
possess such animals should now devote
some attention to provide them with sta
bles suitable to their nature and wants,
and BY so doing they will greatly increase
their health and lOngevity.-Scient
<lMerican.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
GLEASON'S
NEW EEKLY
LINE-OF-BATTLE SHIP.

THE object of this paper is to present, every
l. week, an agreeable melange of the notable
events and literature of the time. It's ample
columns will always contain goodly store Of
popular Original Tales, Sketches of Adventures
on Sea and Land, and Poetic Gems, by the
Best American Authors.
Also the cream of domestic and foreign news SC
condensed as to present the largest amount Of
intelligence of the day; the whole spiccd with
Wit and HumOr.
In politics, and upon all sectarian questions il
will be strictly Neutral. Each edition will be
Beautifully Illustrated
with accurate engravings, BY eminent artists, Of
notable objects, current events in all parts Of the
world, and the national customs and social pc
culiarities Of every people. 1t will contain
views of every City, of edifces of note in the
Eastern and Western hemispheres, of all the
principal ships AID steamers of the Navy and
Merchant service-with fine accurate portraits
of every great public character, male and fe-
male. Sketches of picturesque scenery, repre-
sensations of " life on the wave," and exact IL
lustrations Of admirable or curious specimens
from the animal kingdom, will also be given
One good feature of
GIeason,s Line-of-Battle Ship
will consist Of "broadside !" of Humorous
Engravings, executed by the best artists in that
line, and aimed good naturally and in spirit
Of genial fun, at the reigning follies of the age
and such new public projects, fashions and &C.
currenees, as shall seem to be ft subjects for
cemic Illustration.
An UnrivalIed Corps Of Contributors
have been engaged, and every department will
be conducted under the most efficient and per-
feet system that experience can suggest. The
size Of this elegant specimen of art win be about
fifteen hundred square inches-eight super roy
al quarto pages.
Terms---S2.OO Per Annum.
The first number Of this new Illustrated Pa
per will be for sale en- the FIRST DAY OF
NOVEMBER, 1855, at all the principal period
ical and news agencies and respectable literary
Sepots in the United States and Canadas.
Uieason's Line-of Battle Ship will be publish
eo regu1Sn; -yery Saturday. at Gleason's Pub
Ilshing halis Corner of fremont and Bromfeld
streets, Boston, Massachusetts, by
nov. ii, l6S6 F. GLEASON.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

A Coon THISG.-Some years ago,
there lived in the back part Of Dutchess
County, New York. a rich old farmer,
who was decided reprobate, and like
many other sinners, very much AFRAID of
death. At one time his only son, Eze-
kieh was taken with the smallpox. The
old man was very much afraid of the
contagion, and could not be induced to
visit his suffering heir. At length Eze-
kiel was pronounced to be in an almost
hopeless condition, and the old man was
informed that if he ever wished to speak
to him again in this world, he must avail
himself Immediately of the opportunity.
In a chamber on the ground floor of a
wing of the house, fronting the garden,
lay the sick man, covered with pustules,
aud blind from swelling Of the eye-lids.
The father, trembling with fear, went out
from the kitchen into the garden, and af-
Ier uhun6 L. 10y through the usual
number of sunaowers. hollyhocks and
marigolds, he at length reached the oman
window Of the sick room. There croncb-
ing on the ground, to remove himself as
far as possible from the contagion. he
called out, Ezekiel" "What, father ?''
responded the sufferer. "Zeke, they say
you're right bad, and there's no hopes.
Try and pray little; cause if yer git
well it won't hurt yer. and if yer die Il
s0aH Be a id good thing p
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

"Biddy, spell cat, rat, hat, bat, with
only one letter for each word"
It can't be did %
" What! you Just ready to report ver-
batim phonetically, and can't do that /?
just look here 80 cat, so rat, b 80
hat, bsS0 bat"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
M. JEFF. THOMPSON
Real Estate Agent, s

SAINT JOSEPH, MISSOURI.
ANDS Entered and Warrants Located in
IL Missouri Iowa, Kansas and Nebraska.
Improved and unimproyed Lands for sale in
Buchanan, Andrew, Holt, Atchison, NodaWay,
Gentry, Clinton, DeKalb and Caldwell Counties.
Select and Locate for distant dealers on the
most favorable terms. Examine and value
Lands and pay Taxes for non-residents. Land
Warrants Bought aud Sold.
Having Surveyed large portion Of Missouri,
Kansas and Nebraska, the latter for Govern
ment, am particularly posted in regard to the
value Of Land. | can furnish Land Hunters
with all the informationneeessary to make good
selections june 4, 81, If.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

Young Farmers, consider your calling
both elevated and important-never be
afraid Of the frock and the apron. Put
off no business for te-merToW that can be
done to-day.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

KEEPING APPLEs FROM RorrING.-Take
the finest quality Of sand, heat it in q
kettle. let it cool, put about four quarts
in the bottom of your barrel, put in your
apples or potatOes) till full, spread some
on the top and head up your barrel. By
this means you can keep hard fall apples
for FIVE years.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
Prepared by DR.. J. C. AVER & Co,
Practical and Analytical Chemists, Lowell, Ma

SOLD BY
Shreve 4 Macy, White ClOud, Kansas
Reed X Sturges, Iowa Point, "
JAS. N. York, Doniphan,
]. II. Maun & Co., BrOwnville, Nebraskii
Peter, Frazer & Co., Oregon, Mo-;
Barnard, Adams & Co., st. Louis;
Van Lear & Britain, st Joseph;
And by all Druggists. july ?, 81, ".
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

Timber cut in the Spring. and exposed
to the weather with the bark on. decays
much sooner than if cut In the faH.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

Any Editor or Publisher inserting the above
advertisements for enc year shall receive in pay
ment therefor Twenty Dollars worth Of any
kind of Printing Ink, for sale by Messrs. Lay
& Brother, of this city, at cash prices. The
Ink to be subject to the publishers order at the
expiration of every three months each publ
cation to be sent regularly, addressed Printers
News Letter
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

Why is the caterpillar like buck
wheat cake? Because it is the grub that
makes the butter fly
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
ST. LOUIS
Type and Stereotype Foundry,
& PRINTERS FURNISHING WAREHOUSE,
Established in 1910.

LADEW &c PEERS,
81 and SO, Locust Street, 81. Louis, No.,
TYPE-FOUNDERS, and dealers in all kinds
Il of Presses, Plain and Ornamental Type,
News, Book and COlored Printing Inks, Bronzes,
News, Book, Cap, Letter, Envelope, CoIored
and Manila Papers
We are prepared to furnish complete Printing
Offices, at short notice, and at Eastern prices.
Besides Type Of our own manufacture, We can
ell orders selected from the Specimen Book Of
L. Johnson l. CO., Cincinnati Type Foundry,
Conner Sons, White & Co., Geo. Bruce-also
Wood Type, from Wells & Webb, New York
We are also the authorized Agents for R. Hoe
1 Co., Taylor & Co., Cincinnati Type Foundry,
J. D. Foster Co., s. P. Ruggl0s' Power Press
Manufacturing Co.. and Northrop Printing
Presses
Any newspaper publishing this advertisement
to the amount Of Eve dollars, and sending two
copies Of paper to us, will be rid When they
purchase, Eve times the amount IN type
Eiectrotyping executed at short notice, in
superior manner.
oct. 8, 81. LADEW x PEERS.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13
\. u roEKEr. SAMUEL LAPrIN,
.-..-..... Surveyor & Civil Engineer.
TORREY g. LAPPIN,
Land & General Agents & Surveyors

SENECA, NEMAHA CO., KANSAS,
WILL promptly attend to investing Money,
w paying Taxes, locating and selling Land
Warrants, Surveying Town Sites, sub-dividing
Sections, etc. Will buy and sell Town Shares
and Town Lots, and do a General Agency Bus
mess.
REFERENCES.-J. W. PARKKn, Parker's
Express, Iowa; E. B. FAIRVTpLn, President
Michigan Central College; ]. BaRKER, President
Allegheny College; Hon. B. G. THrBADoux,
Tenn; JAMS FosTER. Oregon, Mo-; Hon. J. P.
HULBERr, Auburn, N. Y. june 4, '57, Iy.s
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

As a great portion Of the above goods are nv
own direct importation, or purchased from first
hands, and are offered for cash, purchasers would
do well to examine nv stock, and compare pri-
ces. RUFUS r. EDWARDS.
June IS, ST, en-.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1859-01-13

\. q. TokKET.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

DEATH on VARIOUS TuNGs--A Stockton man
killed squirrels with phosphorus; crows ate the
squirrels and died; magpies picked out the crows
eyes and died, and the "pizen Is still workn'."
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26
Gbe Grmlitg SoutnaI.
CALVIN B. MCDONALD, Editor.
WElVERVILLE, CALL,
Saturday Morning, February 10, 1850.

OK THE READING OF ADtENrtsEMESTs.--l is
a radical mistake to say that newspaper adver-
tisements are not generally read-they arc, and
frequently before the editors remarks are honor
ed with attention. We know intelligent persons
who look anxiously for the village paper, solely
to find new advertisements, and we have many
times answered the interrogatory before pubca-
tion day, :" Have you any new advertisements
this week ?" If the answer DO no." they lose
all interest in that number. This is a curious
and interesting fact; the persons possessing this
oddity of taste lack no degree Of capacity to
properly appreciate q good article, but this
advertising hunting idiosyncracy must be first
satisfied or they are disappointed 1t is the result
of business education-Grst business, then omuse
ment.
Several times we have taken pains to observe
closely tcidt part of a newspaper is read first by
the greatest number Of people. Passing obser-
vanity along the street, Immediately after the
paper is distributed, we noted that at least one
third commenced on the advertising pages. They
will discover the smallest alteration. II you
doubt this, advertise application for insolvents s
relief, and in ten minutes after the paper is in
the street, ask to borrow hundred dollars |
Politicians look first at the editorial; persons
Indifferent begin among the shortest paragraphs,
and If thus interested, may read the paper
through. Perhaps the greatest number commence
on the first page, as one would begin book,
others look hastily over the first second and third
pages, and settle down to read intently on the
fourth If about to make important advertisement
in this journal, or to print an article that we
deemed so, we should have little concern about
its precise locality-it will be discovered, sure
enough. Advertisers perceive that their locality
is changed every week--a feature not common
with country journals.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

MISS AGRIcULTURE AND THE HONEST MINER"
The Tuolumne Courier, over which Mr.. Ouch
ow presides with great deal of ability and JUS
tice attacks us at aweak pont-he believes, the
hcad-our newspaper head, and says:
He has some queer ideas-tbis cotcmp. Of
ours-and, not the least of them, is indicated at
the head of his paper; where he parades, weekly,
to our astonished gaze, the figure of agriculture
pointing the finger of scorn at the poor, honest
MINER" who, in Difference to the lady, no doubt
has doffed his cbapeau, and stands in an attitude
of unmi tigated perplexity, wondering what there
is about him. or his business, to excite so much
Of the good lady ridicue."
Why, you unrehecting individual Don't you
see that the lady is beekoning the smock-faced
fellow over to her side she wants to tell him
suthin'; he, the great spooney, is standing unde-
cded-he is sort O. rumfuzzled; he's got wife
in the States; he sort'er wants to CO. and then he
sort'er don't like to. Now, neighbor Duchow
what'd you do, If in his sitivation
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

WATER Warren & Ostrom Sacrament
to, advertise Water-Proof Composition" with
which they desire multitudes Of people to grease
their boots
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

UNEcuAT RErREsENTATIoN.-In both branches
of the Legislature there arc 26 miners and q
lawyers; in the Senate, consisting of 35 members,
there are fourteen lawyers We are induced to
enquire whether one-half or three-fourths Of our
population belong to the legal prOfession' Why
are not working men, who as q class, in this
State, are pre-emnently intelligent better rep
resented There are seven miners in the Senate !
Now cannot proportionate number of miners be
found intelligent enough for that place The
answer is obvious. reasonable number of pro-
fessionsl lawyers ia desirable, but an over
proportion is pernicous. Quite number OF
these nominal attorneys know nothing OF law;
they are not distinguished in practice they are
merely lawyers enough TO keep from work, some
OF them having been stimulated to a briof study
of the law in this State, only, by constitutional
aversion to work. We knew a member at a pre-
vious session who fourshed as a lawyer, but
previously kept cigar store in Wisconsin, and
afterwards tavern here, and who became sud
denly an attorney by hanging out shngle in a
mining town; we are acquainted with another
who graduated from one bar to another without
any perceptible acquaintance with law books;
another studied three months with pettifogger
and ran for Judge! These are not the men Of law
required to expound legal difficulties to fellow
members-but they are the sort to franc imper-
feet and unconstitutional statutes.
These remarks must not be applied to our own
intelligent and popular Senator; Burch is good
and successful attorney, and properly prepared
for his profession. But glance through the
Assembly, almost every session, will detect some
hastily constructed lawyers. tbs not hazardous
to say that H--alfax is full Of suck lawyers.
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26
Notwithstanding

The hard times there is large assortment of
pretty much all kinds of Goods, suitable for this
market, for sale at the most reasonable prices by
JAS. S. MCCAIN IL co.
Weayeryilc, Feb. -, 1859 4td
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

DEscRIrTIoN or PAUL.--In one Of the Apoc
citizen Of Iconium, hearing that the Apostle was
coming, went out with his wife and sons, to meet
him. They looked narrowly at every passer,
until cat length they saw man coming, of low
stature bald on the head, crooked thighs, hand
some legs, hollow cyed had crooked noso'--
and from description, they knew il was Paul
II that be correct description, we are not
surprised at the Apostles reputed aversion TO
matrimony; we suppose he wasn't popular with
the women,
Weekly Trinity journal., 1859-02-26

LADIES. ATTENT1oN.-Mrs f. H. Day, at San
Francisco is preparing the Hesperian Magazine,
which will appear in March. 1t will be splendid
periodical, illustrated, and written for by Mrs.
Fader, Frank Soule, Prof. Veatch and other ex-
celent writer's; you will not be disappointed in
expecting one Of the best Ladies' Magazines in
the United States, II isa worthy woman's 5 enter
prise, and you should assist; her family depend
on its success; II must succeed Intelligent ladies
who read this are assured that the Hesperldn will
not fail to please them. Order copies, if you
please, of Greenhood.