Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1859-09-22

and m0pes around, Win tnat patterea oio
hat of his'n tilted onto one side of his head
the queerest way, and looking as miserable
as chicken with the gapes. And he's eter.
nally and ever-last iuly, got that poker, and
a-sawin', an a-sawin' away across his arm,
so, (aud the old female attempted the sub;
lime fiddle posture) for the worlds if he was
playin' 6ddle'-attended to her neglected
nose and departed.)
found I couldn't live, John without mu-
sic, and I thought I would 60 and get apoth-
er instrument; but you see wanted the
privilege of playing on it this time; there
fore, I Thought I would fix that matter before
hand. I met the landlady in the hall next
day, and said L:
sMarmadale y
Curious way to dress lady-&!"
Like music?'
Sometimes yes, n sometimes no-why 2
'Cause I'm going to bring instrument
here-'n' I don't want nobody togo tokick-
in up any shindies about it, if I do-under-
stand?
4 reckon you can bring it along
I went down to the auction-room, John,
but the fellow said he was out of fiddles, and
be was glad of it-they had gone out of fash
ion anyhow-trombones were all the rage,
now, in the upper circles. So I bought a
trombone. reckon it's the prettiest thing, a
trombone is, that you ever saw, John. Brass
all brass-a long tube, on the extension
table plan-and all you've got to do is to
stick one end of it down your throat, and
shove the other end out and in and in and
out, and blow like blazes, and reckon,
John, it makes little the g-gondest rack
ct you ever heard. 1t don't play any tunes,
you know, but that makes no difference. =, I
took the thing home I was freezing to know
what sort of sound trombone made) and
shut myself up in my room, and blew blast
onit-'too.oo- P-de-lightful. Thought
we'll, if just had that fellow here now,
I could make him squirm All that week,
the old landlady ripped around, and tho ig-
noraut boarders, laug bed and giggled, and
smiled, and grew Internally sober, and final
ly gave in and cursed-and all about that
Instrumentation you see I was making up
for lost time, John, morning, noon and night.
By the time Saturday night came, it was
easy to see who liked music there and who
didn't, for half the boarders had gone to some
other house; and believe could have ia
ken the place in another week.
The next day, whep the people were on
their way to church-Marmadale had al
ready gone-I gotin the front window, and
prepared to astonish them. And I did aston
ish them, too, John. I don't think any Of
those Christians had ever seen trombone
before. The women laughed, and the men
frowned, and the boys swung their hats and
hurra'd Twas elighted l blasted and blew
and snorted away till I was wet with perspira.
tion; and when the organ commencedgrowl-
ing, John, begun to 'feelm oats"-it was
the longest kind of match between US,
but I think came out about one snort a.
head. When church let out, I was under
full headway, with large and lively audi
ence of upturned faces, belonging to boys
and girls and niggers, in various stages Of
dilapidation and old Marmadale came near
| fainting when she emerged into the street
and made the discovery.
John, permit meto draw the curtain here.
The wrongs and indignities heaped upon a
peaceable and inofensive man, cannot in
terest you-otherwise, would tell you how
that enraged female remarked, 'Ain't you
ashamed of yourself, you nasty; triain'
good.for-nothin" whelp, you-to have no
more respect'n than thatfor the Sabberday ?
And how she took that beautiful trombone
and twisted it round and round my neck,
and then cuffed and kicked and otherwise
abused me, and finally drove me off the
place. I went home, John, and I'm here
yet. And I renounced music forever and
forever-cnd would advise that young wo,
man over the way there, next to the preach
er's, to 90 and do likewise. Yours, &C.
SOLEATHER.
Mr.. John Baker, Missouri.