Union County star and Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1859-1864, 1859-12-23
" TALKING HOARSE.
A story for Gossips, showing how Scandal grows.

and boys sitting, leaning, and standing
Enter Mr.. Timpson, and buys a plug Of
tobacco.
"Good morning, neighbors ~ said be
"that was a great sermon Parson Smith
gave US last Sunday. But be wont preach
next Sunday, I'm thinking"
"Why not!" asked half dozen voices.
"Because," replied Mr.. Timpson, as he
turned to leave the store, 81 see him with
Br. Jones this mornin' and he was talking
hoarse-and these deacons wont let man
preach when he talks hoarse."
The Deacon left before his hearers had
recovered from their astonishment; but a
one-eyed man at last exclaimed
swell, III be hanged Did you ever?"
As no one ever had, the one-eyed man
shufled swiftly from the store, and made
tracks for his family mansion:
"Sary," said he to his wife, in tone of
mystery, "Parsou Smith is hypOcrite--
what d. you think he's been doing?"
The wife couldn't tell, if it was to kill
her down dead.
"Wby, l see Mr.. Timpsou just now,
and Timpson says he, Il see Parson Smith
talking about horses to Mr.. Jones, this
morning. says he. 1 always told you, Sa-
~, the new parson was no great shakes"
Sary had always "stuck up" for Parson
Smith, but she was not proof against such
terrible accusations, and at once put on
ber sun-bonnet, and went to see Mrs.
Squire Jinkins about it, leaving the one
eyed man to the luxury of reflection.
"Mrs.Jinkins :" exclaimed Sary, as she
entered that lady's kitchen, "what do you
think! Our parson turned backs.ider.
Br. Timpson heard him say to Br. Jones
this morning, that be was going down to
the race-course to buy one of them hors-
es that can 60 like lightnin'."
That was enough for Mrs. Jinkins. Her
husband and she always said that Parson
Smith only wore them whiskers of bis'n
out Of worldly vanity like. She dashed off
to the barn where Jinkins was at work,
and at once told him the exciting tale.
"Oh, Zachariah it's all come Just as
We thought. That Parson Smith has turn
ed out an unsodly man. Mr., Timpson
heard him say to Mr.. Jones, this morning,
that be had bet ever so much money on
the horse race at Boston"
Golly" exclaimed Squire Jinkins, drop
ping bis pitchfork, and graspiug his hat
from q nail on the barn door dts just
what I've been expecting and dreaming
about for week. l must let Mr.. Snooks
know about it, right off,
Snooks was a prominent member Of
Smiths church, and was sending his pigs
into ecstacies with luxurious meal, when
Squire Jinkius burst upon him with:
"Good day, neighbOr; I've got awful
bad news"
Mr.. SnoOks turned pale, and sat down
upon the fattcst pig be could find.
"Say on, Squire"
"Why, that ere parson Smith has turned
out q black sheep. Mr.. Timpson heard
bin say to Mr.. Jones, this morning, that
he had Jouyhttpo running horses for more
than ten thousand dollars, and had lost all
his salary for a year, because Flory Temple
beat the other horse ~
"Massy save US. This must be attended
to-" "groaned Mr.. Suooks; and, with a bound
over the fence, be started for the residence
Of Mr.. Scroggs.
Scroggs was deacon in Parson Smiths
church, and was splitting wood when MIR.
snooks appeared before him.
"Br. Scroggs, have you heard it,"
asked Snooks, excitedly.
.Br. Scroggs hadn't heard it
"Why, our parson has slid from grace,
and has been goin' on awful. Br. limp
son heard him say to Br Jones that he
had lost all his money betting on the horse
races at Boston, and was going TO take up
a collection to buy siI fast horses. and was
going to have the Green made into race
course, and was going to bet a thousand
dollars that his horse could beat Flory
Temple all to nOthiug"'
So horriied was Br. Scroggs at this in-
.elligeuce, that be turned green in the
face, and was about to repeat q prayer,
when be chauced to sec Parson Smith walk
ing leisurely up .he road, accompanied by
Br. Timpson. Mr.. Snooks also beheld
the twain, and be and Br. Scroggs rushed
fran,ically toward them.
"Mr Smith, we've been deceived in you"
exclaimed Br. Scroggs.
"You've spilled the church )" shouted
Br. Snooks.
"Horse races!' groaned Scroggs.
"Flory Temple!' gurgled Shocks.
"Betsipg ten thousand dollars! !" howled
Scroggs.
"Turu the Green into . race course !"
screamed Snooks
"Ridin' A rare TIM ~ moansd C.roooo