The Bedford gazette. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1805-current, 1859-07-08
vol. 2, NO. 40!

! oe 'eeh u Plthtn all over besides being I'M
mensely funny:
While Mons. GODDARD was filing an i'm
mense balloon in the Champ d. Mars. he
amused the spectators by sending up a small
1gure OF man, the perfect sennbIance of M.
thIers without the sPeetacles. The little
man being fifled "ith gas rose majestically
INTO Inc AIR, and was soon lost To- view among
the Clouds His adventures, which became
known the neH day, were curious. Thanks
| to strong and favoTing gale which lmpel-
| led him on his course, the little balloon.rnan
arrived the same afternoon IN the sight of a
| fine country house n the neighborhood Of
Biev@ro. 1t was near the hour of dinner, and
the lady oil the mansion, who naturally thought
herself perfectly safe, was occnupied IN the.
mysteries of her toilet. was a, warm dav.
and she opened ..one OF the windows which
looked out upon the park, and was safe from
any prying eyes. While TRANQUILITY engaged,
by the assistance OF corset-lacing, in reducing
her waist tca size and shape that would reflect
credit on her husbands taste, she was sudden
y startled by noise; and Immediately the
easement was thrownopen, and our little balloon
man entered her chamber unannounced. The
lady utters cry OF terror, and throws shawl
over her shoulders. The little man, driven
by the wind, throws himself upon the unhappy
woman, who; screaming louder than ever,
dashes him off, and he conceais hiuseR uades
the bed.
Just as the wife, in a supplicating voice,
says to this novel Don Juan "Ah Mon.
sleur, 60 away, you will ruin me ~ the hus-
band furIously rushed in, crying ssAh
wretch, have him now !" and goes in search
Of his sword to run him through the body.
The wife more dead than alive, reiteratesy
in the midst of her sobs s'Fly fly Mon
sleur, ana save me the sight of a dreadful
tragedy"
The husband arrives armed to- HE teeth,
followed by the whole household, who seek
to moIify his anger.
While two OF his friends hold the husband,
a third, STOPPING down, perceives our little
friend, who for good cause, utters not word.
and catching him by the leg draws him forth
from his concealment, when, To- MonsieuT
Balloon, no longer held down by the bedstead,
raises himself erect, swella out, and rises
majestically to the ceiling, to the amusement
ofthe spectators, while the poor jealous husband
sinks away, sword and all, heartily ashamed Of
his causeless wrath.
"WHAT IN thunder makes you look so glum,
Tom %
"Oh, Pve had to endure a sad trial TO my
feelings"
"To your pheehnx Why what on airth
was il 40
"Why, ahem II had TO tie on pretty girls
bonnet while her ma was looking on 10
''Sad trial indeed, Tom. Wonder you didn't
faint ~
s'Boy, Yor seem 10 be quite mart-sltogefher
g.. u N
many six black beans are e.
eyes sir-half Dozen
"WeII, how many are half dozen white
beans ~
"Six, sir"
'ETremendous smart boy. Now fell ne
how many white beans there are 10 six black
ones -
"Hai dozen, il you skin 'rm -
-------------
A TRirLER.-A young lady recently gppi?-
ad 10 a city lawyer of Richmond, Va, for
ADVICE as to how she would proceed to obtain
iamagps against any individual who trifes
with her feelings The following note was
submitted in proof OF the gentiemen's endeavors
o win the affections of Juliet
ssDeer -, send bi the boy a breke,
If Rours. They is like my love for u. The
nenes am ute slave. Rosis red and posts pail
Nj Iuv for shall never faile.''
-
Teacher-"Boy al fhe foot, spell admit
ance."
Boy-"A-d, ad, m-i-t, NIT, t-a-n-c-e, tance,
dmittance.'
Teacher-"Gire the definition
Boy-Twenty-6ye cents children half
rice"
Tl5 The latest and most wonderful cure eff
acted by patent medicine, recorded, is the
blowing
A boy had swallowed silver dollar. An
our afterwards the boy threw up the dollar
II in small change, principally in Eve cent
ipces.
C. The women of Blissfield, Michigan, have
rganized lodge of the Daughters OF Malta
nd are holding their mysterious meetings two
three evenings IN each week. The men
ave thus far failed TO ascertain the object and
anners OF the new society.
ga man having hurt his forehead, was
lvised 10 rub II with brandy. Some days
ter, being asked If he had done SO, he
.omptly answered !: sWell, 1 have tried
veral times, but can never get the brandy
gher than my mouth.
AN exchange says that it is just as sensible
owe TO undertake 10 get married without cour-
no as 10 attempt 10 succeed in business with
it advertising. True as preaching. Our bu-
ness folks can s'stick pin there