Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1859-09-27
MISCELL A n Y .
BurIing, the New York Dun.

The Boston Posts account of this man gives
but faint picture of him. will give you one
from real life:
Ten years ago was seated in my Office at No.
II Wall street, busily driving the quill, when l
heard a Quiet step behind and then mild voice
inouiriug if had the transcript ofa certain judg-
ment against one J. G. O.-the protector of the
great Peg -wah- wah Company for selling
Indian Medicines. looked up and saw man
whose twisted foot aud palsied arm were quite
familiar 20 me, but of whose name or calling
knew nothing.
"Yes,n replied, II have the transcript"
"Wei, want it," he said, "I'm going to COL
lect it for the creditor"
"Going to collect it'll" exclaimed, "Why,
the Judgment, and all ordinary means of grace,
have long ago been exhausted upon o. de Is
hopelessly insolvent, and is, besides, the most
adroit scamp of swindler ever encountered.
"Whst's that to me2" broke out the visitor, IN
gruff, strong voice, quite different from his
first tones. "Perhaps you don't know VINO
am. Pm Burling, the man about town. lou
a lawyer, and not know Inc Sherlts are gooo
Tor nothing constsbles are good for nothing
executions aud creditors bills are good Tor
nothing. Give me the transcript-heres the
order for it'll make the money out OF him.
| swiveled around in my chair and stared at
the man. "And will you be so good, Mr.. Bur
Ing" asked, "ss to tell me what is your patent
plan for superceding officers and writs, and for
squeezing blood out of turnips, and cash out OF
the President of the Peg-ghe ewah-wa Com
psny3"
"How do it9 you mean. Why l dun 'em
at their houses, dun 'em in the street, dun
em At the theatre, dun 'em in church, catch
'em early in the morning and stick to em all
day; follow 'em up wherever they go; 90 W
meals and eat with 'em go to bed and sleep
with 'sm; give em no peace night nor Gay +;
Sunday nor week day, stick to em ike death 10
4 dead Niger. A man who owes debt. de
won't pay it. l follow him up all the week 80
he can't do any business, nor go to see his sweet
heart. nor walk in Broadway, nor eat with any
appetite, nor sleep without dreaming I'm after
him with the devil to help run him down. All
this won't do. Very well. When he goes TO
church, Sunday, he finds me in his pew. (Your
Sheriffs can't work Sundays do my best bu-
siness then) The congregation rise, ana lie
rises takes out his book, opens ct the place, ana
there he finds the bill I've stuck there, and gets
so mad lie can't say amen."
"Sheritfs and ceDstables !" continued he, get
ting loud and fierce, twill sheriff go OF Sun
day morning to parsons house and follow him
to church and walk up the broad aisle with him
before all the congregation, and go up the pulpit
stairs close to his HEELS and slip into the pulpit
after him before he can shut the door, and take
a seat by his side and get up, when he gets up,
and when he opens the Bible, opens John Jones
bill full length and lays it down over the chap
ter and verse, and tell him There's that 6it.
of horse hire pay 1t before you preach! But,
that's what | did-and got my money too"
"Apd what commission did you chargef"
"Fifty per cent" "Rather strong," sug-
eested, "but still your mode of procedure was
strong Do you often get as much as nifty per
cent?"
"When,I earn it, get it. DR.. O., of Broad.
way. sent me to dun fellow who lived In q
back ward, and kept two bull dogs that he let
loose when anybody came to collect honest debts:
went to him with horse-pistol IN each hand
and DR.. C.'s bill in my teeth, and made him pay
ND. What did DR.. @. offer me for getting his
sixty dolars9 He offered me one dollar,
won't take it, says l. I'll pay no more, says he.
Paw me thirty dollars, says. Get out OF my
office, or I'll kick you out, says he. Pay me
thirty dollars. says l. Clear out, says he, and
he kicked me out of his door and down the steps
into Broadway. / goes to the-hotel ana
hires great arm. chair out of the bar room, and
takes it across the street, and plants it on the
curbstone right opposite DR.. C.'s office door, and
LAYS the bill had made out on full sheet OF
foolscap across my knees, hanging down so
every body that went by could read IN large,
black, sanded letters:
DoOToR G.
To ]. BURL1Ne, DIR.
For collecting OF Richard Roe -
Commission $4,000
And all the crowd kept stopping to read, 80
that there was all the while two or three hun
dred people standing on the Doctors pavement
and reading first my bill aud then his sign, and
making their jokes. I had hired the chair for
the whole afternoon, but he hadn't stood this
more than fifteen minutes before he comes to
the door, and says, come here, you rascal, and
went in and took thirty'dolars of his money, and
left the bill recepted."
.sBut, my friend, don't your impudent ways
often get you into scrapes, are you not AFRAID
some one will some day break your head 2"
''Break whose head9" he thundered; didn't
Col. s., of New Orleans, q man that's killed
seven men in duels. when | went to dun him at
the Astor House-didn't he grab me by the
slack of my breeches, and hold me out the fifth
story window, and shake me there above the
pavement, and say shall let you fall, and break
your neck on the stones, or take you in, and
kick you down stairs2
SWELL" said |, anxiously, "what did you do
then2"
"What did do2 | said PAY ME THAT MONEY
and didn't he pull me in and pay me every
cent?"
The intensity of his manner, as he thus related
his exploits, caunot be rendered on paper-es-
pecially when he exclaimed with closed teeth