Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1859-12-07
BILLY FIELDS CANT. MEETING scR.pE

This question addressed to a crowd of
Youngsters, who were gathered around Uncle
ben, as he was seated in the town of Clinton
near sunset 1t was of course answered in the
negative, with a request that he should tell
them Of it.
"Wall, you see and Billy and j i'm Lindsey
cluded we wonld go over to Rock Spring camp
meetin' three years ago. Jim and Billy were
young fellers; and both were crazy on the sub
Ject OF gals AS for myself, [ went there in a
religious pint of view. After we got thar, we
stopped at the tent of one of our friends, and
alter supperw concluded would go down
to the stand. and hear the sarmint. Billy got
hold OF a little gal, and off he went Jim hitch
ed to one as weighed nigh onto hundred and
seventy, and follered arter them, and |, not
withstandin' | had come thar in a religious
pint of view, thought it wouldn't be hurtin'
anybody to sorter to mix the thing; SO / tux
hold of young, bouncin' bloomin' widder,-
boys. that widder about the puttiest piece
but never mind about that now and away
we went arteI the rest.
ssWall, the preachin' went on and closed
without anything happenin' orful and sublime
as Stubbs says, 'cept Jim's jinin the church,
and me goine to sleep and comm back with
out the widder. | was sorry for it, but it
no use talkin'; l couldn't a toch her with
ten foot pole. She was as mad as hornet
Billy said l must 'pologise; | mought done
it if he hadn't told me to. He's nice thing
to teach me perlireness, amt he He amt
| got sense enough to keep his mouth shet bout
nothin,' specially where l am consarned.
| s'Wall, | and Jim went to bed, and Billy got
a bed in the next room. Jim soon went to
| sleep and | war lynn and thinkin' bout the
widder, when all at once the gals (the next
! room full of 'em) commenced er larfin'
| and gigglin' in the next room at terrible
rate. | know'd they were up to mischief, for
! there war three or four in thar as wild as tur-
| keys, with that little gal that Billy went out TO
| . a. 4 l. -, ,,r-,r oil
! sorts. l wanted to know what they were up
| to, so reaches over and shakes Jim. But
! then | know'd as Jim wouldn't do. cause he
| had just jined the church, and furthermore he
was the most shame-faced man | ever saw
! He and Billy were down on the creek, long
| time ago, and they cum upon a whole pile of
| gals in swimmin,' and jim like fool. got
ashamed and hid behind stump. Billy look
| ed-durn him keep him from lookin'-he
! done wus, too.'
ssWhat did he do ?'' asked some one.
ssHe tied up their clothes aud split, but the
scnoulmaStcr round IL out, and the way he VOL
| loped Billy war caution to young men as
walks on the creek when thar is gals in the
country as have notion to larn how to swim.
ssWalI arter thinkin' over these circumstan-
ces, l concluded that Jim war not the man
wanted. So | let him loose, and let him go to
| sleep again, and then went into the room whar
! Billy was and woke him up and explained to
| him how matters stood in the next room. We
determined to see what was gwine on but how
| to do it was the question. Thar war no cracks
| to peep through, and there was 10 toot-hod
! to peep over-ye all know how tents are fixed
| Wall, arter studyin' awhile, Billy hit on plan
| 1t was this: One of us was to stand on the
| shoulders of the other one and peep over
| This was a pretty good plan, but Billy couldn't
! hold me up--he being such little feler, and
[ such an old gourd. Billy didn't like to
make the trial, but greed TO on the consider
| alton that | was not to stay up too long. war
willin' cause / ies wanted to see ef | could
| cotch a sight of the widder anyhow. Wall, l
| mounted, and les cotched sight of the little
| creeterS, spread out in a row in the beds on
the floor, when BilIy's wind guv out, and down
| cum on Jim's paunch. and he fetched shout
and hollered GLORY p The cussed fool thought
| the Judgment day had come. This sorter
stopped the gals for while, but we FAY as still
as sqrrels, that is, 'cept Jim who kept groan-
| in and twistin' some. We sent word out to
the old folks that be had the colicky. Bime-
by the gals commenced their frolicks again,
that is, 'cept that big fat gal, that war cryin'
cause Jim war sick.
ssBily said 1t war his turn now, and so 1t
was but fallen down had like to broke my
leg. But thought it would never do to cut
the feler out of his fun, Billy got up and
commenced lookin'. / got mighty tired, but
| know'd it wouldn't do to say nothin, cause
the gals would hear me, and there would be a
hurtin so | reached up and sOrter pinched
Billy, as a sign for him to go down. But he
never moved peg thar he stood, a stretch
in his neck and gain over at them gals. A
thought Just then struck me. Sez | to myself,
didn't Billy let me fall on purpose jess now
By lingo [ b'lieve he did = So l reached up
and got a good hold on him, ard when he
| stretched little further over sent HIM Whlr-
lin right amongst them gals. Did You ever
sperience an earthquake Didyou ever dream
| of kingdom come 2 You orter been thar when
Billy lit Such a squallin'-sIch a crawlin'
under beds-sich a hidin' under straw, you
! never did see When StubbS gets drunk
he talks about a young fellow named
Don Juan. crawln' under some bed fixins al
, an old Spaniard's house, but his fix was nnthin
to Billy Fields scrape. The old folks all run
up, one old brother commenced prayin' loud
enough to be heard from Don to Bersheba-
and the way them folks give it to that young
man
ssClear out from here, You nasty, imperdent
scoundrel! = said an old lady as had daugh-
, ter in that room
eve will prosecute him ? said a little jack
leg lawyer as never had prosecuted anybody
vet nor never will long as people have as
much sense as they have got now.
, elbow could you do so Mr.. Fields 2 said the
little gal as has been 'luded to-.
..Thar they stood, all around him, givin' il
to him and not lettin' him say word. De-
gun to git sorry for biily' anu hno" ~, he
didn't have sense enough to git out OF the
, scrape. so walks up to whar they were stand
in: but never let on for while, but stood
, and listened without they seem me-. Bimeoy
one old lady spied out, and sez she:
.sAint it er shame, Mr.. Johnson Amt 1t
shame for honest folks to be posed on so by
this little sneaken', quiverlin-,
ssAnd nv gal takin' on so sbout him too
= I,u show her, said another old 'oman.
! .sAnd my Nancy givin' him bunch O