Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1859-05-20
HOW WE TOOK A B0ARDER
By MARY KYLE DALLAS.

Our house was quite large one, and
besides those apartments which we oecu-
pv ourselves, and those which we dedi-
cate to our guests, there is a very nice
little room on the second floor, which we
never use, and very seldom enter.
One morning when l happened ofeel
in a very economical mood, / bethought
myself that, were this room furnished
prettily, we might just as we'll as not take
a boarder-there were such numbers OF
advertisements in the papers for just such
places. So many single ladies wished
board in private family where no 9th
er boarders were taken,' and so many sin
gle gentlemen pined for the comforts OF
home,' that 1 had not the lest doubt we
could suit ourselves exactly.
Accordingly, l broached the subject
to Psalter, at the table, that very evening
Psalter only laughed at first, but when
he found that was in earnest, acqu:esced
in the arrangement, merely stipulating
that neither maiden lady nor gentleman
and his wife were to become occupants
ofthe apartment consequently my choice
was limited. A single gentleman must
have, and l was determined to be very
particular about him. l considered my
self pretty good judge of character,and
I resolved to select an intellectual and
moral, well-mannered person, or to give
up the idea altogether.
Tuesday and Wednesday passed with
out my answer. Thursday brought a
young man belonging to fire company.
who stipulated that the members of his
machine should be allowed the privilege
of meeting in my parlor once week,as
their engine house was out of order, and
likewise mentioned that he always in the
morning, took brandy instead OF milk in
his coffee.
To this gentleman's proposal l was
obliged to answer in the negative, and
on his pressing the point, to inform him
that the reception of the engine compa
ny would of itself be an insuperabIe OBJ
stacle. did not think it prudent to ado
that his appearance and conversation die
not tend to make me desirous Of his com
pany. Although l thought so, baseC
my objections altogether upon the fire
company's expectation of meeting in my
parlor.
l had said enough to offend my visitor
however, for he thrust his head forward
turtle-fashion, and remarked that l ha'
better not say anything agin No. 240
and that / might be hoppin' glad to hav
'em meet in my parlor, for-for all
thought myself some pumpkins, wa
only small 'taturs, and that No. 24O boy
were all fine fellers, and I'd better nc
contradict him-sa-ay ? and he depart
ed, leaving an odor ofbad cigars and stal
whiskey behind him.
My next applicant was maiden LADY
who desired accommodations for hersel
a parrot, monkey, two poodles, kitteI
and cabinet ofmineralogical specimen
Of course she did not suit me, especial
as she was very particular in her inqu
ries as to my servant girls capability
washing, and attending to poodles an
parrots.
Closely following upon her heels can
a gentleman of respectable appearan'
and plausible address, with whom,in spi
of a pair of very wild, singular eye
which protruded beyond the lids unt
they appeared about to drop upon h
cheeks, l was nightly taken. In fat
the arrangements were nearly conclude
when to my horror,I made the discover
that he was professor of SpiritualisE
and a speaking and singing medium
likewise, my eyes were opened at once
the singularity of the gentleman's ey
by this confession, and became ava
that the nearest insane asylum would,
all probability, suit him far better tn
my humble dwelling. So, with an
ward thanksgiving for my rescue, 1 G
out of the scrape as politely as possib
and the medium departed
Then arrived three very untidy you
men, who wanted to share the apartme
therein.
After these had departed, declared
was quite out of patience, and almost
solved to give up my notable idea al
gether; but just as l had come to t
resolution, heard another ring at
bell. Sucn ring Not loud imp
ative, abrupt peal, but modest, musi
Standardization, which betokened an
assuming and well bred applicant for
mission.