The Jeffersonian Democrat. [volume] (Chardon, Ohio) 1854-1865, 1859-04-08
A Melting Story.

ono winter evening country stOro. keep
or, in the Green Mountain State, was about
closing his doors tor the night, and while
standing out In tho snow outside, putting
up the window shutters, no saw through the
glass, lounging fellow within, grab a bound
OF frosh butter from tbo shelf aud deposit il
in his hat
Tho act was no sooner detected than tho
revenge was hit upon, and very few min
utes found the store keeper at onco ndulg.
ing his appetite for fun to the fullest ex-
tent, and paying off tho thief with a face
tious sort OF torture, for which he might
have gained premium from tho old inqui-
siiion.
Il say Seth y said tho store keeper, com.
ing IN aud closing the door after him, slap
ping bis hand over his shoulders and stamp
ing tho snow off his feet
Seth had his hand on the door, his hat
upon his head, and tho roll of butter in his
at,anxlous TO make his exit as soon as pos
siblo.
Il say, Seth. sit down; reckon now on
such e-tar-nal night us this, a lee,lu some
thing warm wouldn't hurt f,llcr."
Seth felt very uncertain, he had tho but
ter aud was exceedingly anxious to bo off,
but the temptation OF something warm sad.
iy intertered with his resolution TO go. This
hesitation, however was soon settled by the
right owner Of the butter taking Seth by
the shoulders and planting him in u seal
close to the stove where no was in spch u
manner cornered in by the barrels and box.
es, that there was but ono way possible OF
getting out. and right in this, sure enough
the store keeper sat down.
Seth, Se'll havo little warm Santa
~
50 he opened the sieve door and stuffed in
as many sticks as tho space would admit |;
"without it you'd freeze going home such a
night as this"
Soth already felt the butter settling down
closer to his hair, and jumped up sud declar-
ing he must go.
Not till you've had something warm,
Seth, 80 come, Tvo got story to toh YOU
too, sit down now and Seth was again pL sh.
ed into his scat by his cunning t0rmrutoy
"Oh it's tn darned hot here" said the
potty thief, attempting to rise.
"Sit down-sit down-dont be in such q
plaguy of hurry" retorted the grocer,
pushing him back IN his chair.
But I've got tho cows to fodder, and
some wood to split. aud must DO going !"
said the prosecuted chap.
But you mustn't tear yourself away Seth,
in this manner. SIT down; lot tho cows
take care OF themselves, ami keep yourself
cool; you appear to DO fidgoty," said the
rOguish grocer with wicked leer
Tho next thing was tho production Of
two smoking glasses of hot rum toddy, the
worry sight OF which, in Seths present stu.
alton, would have made the hair stand Greet
on his head, had it not been well oiled and
kept down by the butter.
Seth, I'll give you toast now, and you
can butter it yourself" said the grocer. with
an air of such consummate simplicity that
poor Seth still believed himself unsuspect.
cd. Seth, here's Christmas goose well
roasted and basted, oh tell you that it e
the greatest eating in creation. Aud. Seth
don't you mover use hogs fat, or common
cooking butter to basto with-come take
your tOddy."
Poor Seth now began TO smoke, as we'll
as melt, aud his mouth was dramatically
sealed up as though no had been dumb.
Streak after streak of the butter came pour.
ing from under his hat, and his handker.
chief was soaked already with the greasy
overflow. Talking away as if nothing had
happened, the grocer slutiing tho wood into
the Stove, while poor Seth sat bolt upright
with his back against the counter, and his
knees almost touching the rod hot furnace
before.
plagued cold night this said the grocer.
why, Seth, you seem to perSpire as If you
were warm! Why don't you tako your hat
off Here, let mo put your hat away T.
mo J. exclaimed poor Seth at last, with
a spabmodic effort to got his tongue loose,
cIappiug both hands upon his hat. "No, |
must go, let me out, | amt wull; lot me
gor
A greasy cataract was now pouring down
the poor follows face and mock /; and soak:
! ing into his very boots, so that he was liter
ally in perfect bath of OIL"
swell, good night, Seth" said tho humor.
ous Vermouter, " if you must 60 !" adding,
rs he left, "neghbor | reckon the fun I've
had out of you is worth nIne-pence, so
shan't charge you for that pound of butter. "
| INCREASE OF LONGEVITY 1t ia a prevail