Pointe Coupee Democrat. [volume] (False River [i.e. New Roads], Parish of Pointe Coupee [La.]) 1858-1862, 1859-03-12
NO. 9.
W-hoop !!

Journal Read it, ladies, 1t Is worth
.perusi'ig:
i. IN Enylislnan has lately written u
nn.u.p!et entitled dangers OF Crlnolinc,'
.inwhicll he avows that this fashion is
making lalncntablc inroads into the
happiness and morals Of his fair
We cannot agree with
sthis Englishman's idea OF crinoline as
Fepnducing to ilI-llcalth, for assurcdIy
tic fashion has essentially lightencd the
lead of skirts women were wont to wear,
and with proper undcr-garncnts the
person can be as we'll protected as here
totorc. The pamphlet says:
THE TALL WOMAN.
Now look i'll the opposit direction, and
see that tall lady sailing along in all the
amplitude of skirts. What does she look
like? A Jack n-thc-yreen on stills; IL
weeping grated on a poplar; the
monument stock into the dome of St
PauPs with the dome downwards; or
any other bizarre conglomeration you
can imagine. Onward she comes against
Il violent gust of wind See how she
rocks to and fro, like q vessel in {; storm,
keeping her perpendicular position with
the utmost difficulty, and graspins hold
/ Of the railings as she passes along, to
steady herself on her feet.
THE FAT WOMAN.
Anon there comes a very short lady,
to whom nature has been extremely kind
in awarding an amplitude Of figure sell
dom seen. One would think that this
lady would be satisfied with the amount
Of bulk that had been apportioned her.
But no such thing; with the wayward
ness and blindness which the victim of
fashion are guilty OF, she believes that
adding to the extent OF corporcal out.
line adds. charm to the already liberal
possession boasted Of
TIE THIN WOMAN.
And now there comes the exact oppo-
site of her who has just passed; thin,
very thin lady, somewhat maliciously
called "scragSy," without the slightest
prctension to figure, and no develop
mcnt worth speaking of Be good enough
to observe that the lady is, for purposes
best known to herself, holding her dress
several inches from the ground and, as
she does so, displays a foot and some
thing more Of a pair Of slender, shape
less legs, that contrast most oddly and
unpicturcsqucly with the surrounding
extent of skirt.
THE sTUMPY WOMAN.
See, there is {; short, stumpy woman
of about ffty-fvc, coming down the
street What does she look like in tho
distance? Why her body resembles IL
pin cushion, and her head pin stuck in;
or a water-butt, with the handle Of II
broom peeping out at the top; or an an
mated humning-top; or locomotive
Goblin; or an inflated sack, tied in a knot
at the mouth, or anything, in fact, that
can be more ludicrous than another.
Mark! the lady draws near; she evident
Iy admires herself, and looks downwards
with an air Of supreme satisfaction.
There goes the precious crinolinc-
swing, swing, swob, swob, first back
wards, then forwards, then round about,
then up and down, and finally ends with
u jrmblc of all the movements. \ set
Of little boys see my lady coming and
begin to scent fun. "Crickey, amt she
il full blown 'un, Tonr "What time
does the balloon go np!" who's your
cooper?n and several other impertincnt
queries are addressed by the wicked
little boys to the inflated female. On
ward she goes, somewhat crest-fallen.
it is true, but not quite converted, and
fatters herself with the contemplation
of the sensation she will cause wien
she reaches the purlieus Of the West
End.
We must make one more extract from
this pamphlet. The indignant English
man--who evidently, some day, has
been crowded into the gutter BY sweep
ing crinoline--says:
If we walk along the public highway.
we arc frequently compelled to stand on
each side, or to step Ipto the road, to
permit it to pass; if we enter church.
we find it monopolizing the greater part
of the pew: if VIC turn the corner OF the
street, it rushcs against us, and nearly
knocks us off our equilibrium; if We as-
cend fight of stairs, it descends like
an avalanche upon us-so that VIC are
either compelled to retreat in the landing
or fall back OH the mat; if We visit the
theatre, it surges before, behind, and ON
either side Of us, SO that we cannot see
or hear anything Of what is performing
on the stage, and are well nigh suffoea-
ted into the bargain.
Old women trembling on the verge Of
the grave enshrine their decrepit bones
within it; young children, not released
from the trammels Of swaddling clothes,
jerk their little forms about III it; ugly
women, pretty women, dark women, fair
women. are all under the diobolicai in.