The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1859-01-06
NEW YEARS ADDRESS
OF THE CARRIER OF
E1G 391R9a990aAN>

Kind Patrons and Friends we salute you more,
With a bow and smile, we've done oft before,
And hope that this morning may bring you good cheer
And plenty of fun for happy new year.
IT'S the wish of the heart of your Carrier boy:
For all of your homes abundance of Joy;
May the Jes host of readers (whove settled their bl
Eat, drink and be merry, and never be i'll.
As for those who forget the poor printer to pay
We don't care fig, if they're gloomy to-day;
IF they've 'narry red" in their pockets to jingle.
And their roofs be without the sign of shingle,
II they eat cold dinner and sup bone,
And the coolest of nights go to bed all alone;
They've their fingers and on their toes
Never have clean sh,-have to wear their old ctohes
We would not be sorry, if nightmares alright
And Tom-cats 90 under their window to fight
If all these evils assai them this winter
It's only their due for thus cheating the Printer.
SO has stepped out, SO has stepped in,
And welcomes all with humorous grin,
So, perhaps, iwould be well to take review
OF the year that is past, and to glance at the new.
A great many good things have been said and done,
good deal of Sorrow good deal of fun,
And doubtless the year that has just now begun
Will many of the same kind of things.
Sly Cupid will asten great many hearts,
And scatter afar his mischievous darts,
And thus will infict great many smarts.
For Cupd-we're tod-has pair of feet wings;
And certain is that he known
To get sleepy nodding DER scePtre and throne;
Though his arrows are busy, they the mark,
But sometimes hit misses and sometimes spark.
The past with the fruit of his works has been rife,
And many poor fellows been halterd for life,
And some even now in search for wife.
But all this is surprsng-astoundng me,
A boy though am, look and be - (B C.)
Last year houg they would stretch long wire,
And then with spark of electrical fire,
Would make old Atlantic the butt of their mirth
As they talked from the opposite sides o: the EARTH
But old Neptune indignant at being used so,
Jumps up in a rage: "Ill settle their dough-"
He called for his trident, and said, sa Us he
CTo his right hand domestic Calope)
.Bast my eyes Call, if don't give them ere fellers
Jessey, for coming here into my patch and trying
To bcmozzIeisticate in that free
And easy siyle;' so his horses were brought
On he jumps and is off with the swiftness of thought.
He came to the place where the wire found,
lie curbed his horses and jumped to the ground.
He bit it a lick with the butt of his stick
And it in in the middle.
Then his anger appeased, he very much pleased
And he summoned from far all the maids to his car
And said: "Know all men by these presents, that i,
Nep Neptune the son of old love in the sky
Do give and bequeathe unto you and your heirs
Or Assigns all that large lot of wire that bears
The name of "Cable graph which did sever,-
To clothes line hencefor:h and forever,
E Pluribus Unum e Rhynktum de diddle."
And so we've been told by Punch (anG it's true,)
That this is The cause, why the won't be new,
And Why the dispatches cannot get through.
And now, in conclusion, my friends, will say,
hope you'll be happy and merry to-day,
And live to enjoy with plenty of beer
hundred returns of this happy New Year.
And las-but not least-we would humbly suggest,
To give satisfaction, perhaps twould be best,
If you, friends, would in this happy time
Wouldwoud-pray us-or the sake of the rhyme
Would hand us-wby! for instance, dime.