Red Wing sentinel. [volume] (Red Wing, M.T. [i.e. Minn.]) 1855-1861, 1859-06-25
WIT AND SENTIMENT

y i
- Why is \ mutt like fool? Be
cause it holds !: lady's haul without
squeezing it.
IT Yankee should meet death
on the pale horse, he would banter
him to S,cup" critters
No cat. has two tails. Granted.
Then, a cat has one tail more than no
cat? True. Well, then, we have
proved that a cat has three tails!
mo poultice has ever been dis
covered to draw out mans virtues
so fully as the sod which covers his
grave.
-"My LAD" said lady to y boy
carrying an empty mail bag, faro yon
- mail boy?" "You doesn't think I'm a
female boy does ye, ma'am?"
"A negro boy was driving a mule
when the animal suddenly stopped and
refused to bulge. "Wont 20, hcy?''
said the boy. "Fcel grand, do you:
Guess you forget your father was a
jackass!''
An 1rishman's description Of a
fiddle cannot b. bcat:-" 1t was the
shape Of q turkey, and tho sizo of a
goose; he turned it over on its back
and rubbed its belly wild a schtick.
aud OCH St. Patrick, how it squaled.' -
Convcr.ing, one day, with fash.
iona le aui pretty belle, tie f,s:i.liou>
MIR. Spriggs observed that "I.adics
that lisped wished to be kissed" The
young lady had before spoken unnf:
tectedly. but now replied, +" Tho TIE
heard t5ay."
-" Why, George, what arg yo,,
hoeing in the garden for at this time
ofnight %
swell, l was awful dry, mother,
ard don't the Bible say D, every
one that thirsteth p
The old lady drew her head in,
closed the window, and collapsed.
Two old maids were converting
with a young lady, who was about to
he married /; one exclaimed petulently:
swell, if you will do it, you must
shear the responsibility"
.':certainly,'' modestly replied the
young lady, ~ expect to bear several
responsibilities"
a wag thus concentrates bis de-.
scription al a visit to the White Noun.
:tains:
Mine weary uphill miles ~ sped
ri. The aAitinr ann f0 RaA
S;ssRy and grim he went to bed, tgr
..n Su,ssv and grim went We. 20
Seven sleepisss hours We tossed. aud then.
The rising sun to SEQ ral st,,r
Sulky and grim we rose again. -'
Sulky and grim rose be-"
"You arc from the country, are you
rot, sir?" said dandy clerk in book
shop to a handsomely dressed Qua
ker, who had given him some trouble.
eyes" swell here IL an c@s>av on the
rearing Of calves :'That," said Amin
adab, as he turned to leave the store,
'''tfee had better p, esent to thy mo
Their" "'
An English Admiral, being about to
engage /. Spanish vessel, thus ad-
dressed his men: "My good fellows!
Never let it be said that we, who
live on prime beef and mutton, were
beaten BY those who have nothing to
cat but oranges and lemons"
At lecture lately delivered at
Liverpool, Lola Monies said it she
were man she would rather firt with
M American girl than q female of any
other country. "You British men,
said she, think that counting in Eng.
land is a delightful business, but = man
who has never engaged in that pas.
time in America don't begin to know
anything about it,"
"A Virginia negro boy, who pro.
fessed to be drcadfully alarmed at the
cholera, took to the woods to avoid it,
and was there found asleep. Being
asked why he went to the woods, he
said: "To pray" But" said the
'ovcrscer, how was it You went to
sleep" "Don't know, massa, 'zactly,
but I spec l must have ovcr-prayed
said the negro.
IF "A Quaker intending to drink 4
glass Of water, took up a small tumb-
Ter of gin. He did not discover hi,
mistake until he got behind tho door
ant; swallowed the dose, when he lift.
I'd both hands and exclaimed, "Verily,
have taken inwardly the balm of tho
worlds people,! What will dorothy
saw wheI, she smellcth nv breath p"
~ Let US be careful to distinguish,
modesty, which is ever amiable, from
reserve, which is only prudent. A
man is hated sometimes for pride.
when it was excess Of humility that
gave tho occasion.
Yesterday afternoon . rather gen.
teel looking young man walked into
= the bar of the Woodruff House, and
called for whisky toddy. H. was
81 served, and after he had drank the
toddv, lie obtained cigar, and sat By