Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1859-09-05

policeman taking down my address with as
much respect as if it had been "Police Com
mittee, Guildhall" The redress was now by
civil process and an action for damages-not
by the law of the coat-coar and the cell. And
away | walked arm-in-arm with Deputy Hams,
the policeman obsequiouSly, and in some fog
gy imitation of what he had heard elsewhere,
muttering, "You leave my custody without
the slightest stain upon your character" and
turning round to the shopkeeper to COM
fort him with the assurance that che shouldn't
wonder if the gentleman brought an action for
false imprisonment against him."
In few days demand was made upon me
by the shawl-deaer's attorneys for the sum of
t1tty-two pounds ten shillings, for the damage
t'damage, that was true enough-they might
have said indeed, "total smash'') of their
clients window. Now, | had been led away
to believe in those very learned gentlemen,
who are retained no doubt at an enormous
expense, by some cheap weekly papers, so
cannot be called bretiess, and who have pro-
nounced over and over again, to Constant
Readers, A, b, G, ID, and all the letters of the
alphabet who have ever broken shop windows,
that they can only be called upon to pay for
an ordinary pane of glass so | resisted the
claim OF Mr.. Paisley, the shawl-deales, and by
the advice OF my solicitor (who, it appears,
knew no better even unto an action.
BE warned, my friends This apparently
talse 1t is true there have been decisions of
an opposite nature, but, in my case, as in
may Others, where intent or malice were not
even to be thought OF, the judge ruled that the
defendant was liable for full value of the glass
u Q and Z All, paisley .. Picles;" QuibbIe's
Law of Shop-fronts, p. 227 Squabble's
Orange-Peel Precedents, p. 78; Chatty S Plead
ings on Plate-glass, p. SO, &c.)
Now, this appears to me las, of course,
n tS, 81 =,
ages monstrous thing. have exhausted
my terms of Indignation over it, however,
calling the judge by the name of Pontus Pill
ate, Scroggs, Jeffreys, and every vile epithet |
could think OF, and paid my money long ago;
but if the law is then interpreted correctly,
none but millionaire will soon be able to pass
along our principal streets with impunity. A
pea-shell, cabbage-stalk, a piece of orange
peel on the pavements, might suddenly involve
one Ill the loss Of all ones fortune and per-
haps half ones body. Shopkeepers who per-
slst In having windows in solid sheets of twelve
feet square should, at least, be compelled to
put some guard before them. The best plan,
III the meanwhile, is not to go near their win
dows; there is only one thing more dangerous
and more expensive-to take your wife near
them.
Mr.. Pickles continued with some remark
about his nephew Solomon the Doctor =
Feeling dubious of his own powers, he an
swered an advertisement in fashionable pa
per, ana was hilarious as an elephant when he
got himself accepted as assistant and dispenser
to fashionable doctor at "a fashionable water
lng-pace at q salary of ESQ year. But in
three weeks he comes back growing about
the humbug, the meanness, "the solemn
bosh, as he calls it, of the profession, as prac-
tced at fashionable watering places. And he
has way of cracking his fingers with such en-
donation nc hn alata oil tI,nt
1t makes one jump, and brings up painful rec
objections of pulling the legs of tough old
turkey over the kitchen-door at Christmas
time. The mere recital of bread-pills and
sham draughts administered to the yaletudi.
marian dowagers of the watering-place, of the
seasoning and splicing Of acua pura-their
enormous faith in which soon made them
whole-raiseS him to such wrath as is painful
to see and hear Ill one not very easily moved.
lie was not going to be party to such fraud
SO degrading to the profession which at heart
he loves, but which has proved a sad fiirt and
coquette with him, poor fellow-and SO he
threw up his situation i'll disgust.
BY the way, the tremendous power of
cracking his fingers might have been of great
use to hun if he had had the knack of making
use of any of his talents profitably his, it
would seem, could only be made profitable in
the abuse OF them, The fashionable doctor to
whom he was assistant at the fashionable wa.
terlng'place had studied the arts of rhetoric,
department, dress, equipage, conyersation-as
every fashionable doctor should-all but sur
gerry. He knew all about balls and entertain
ments, land gave them himself on a scale of
dazzling splendOr,) all fashionable scandal all
the latest arrivals and departures-everything
but physic. Now it so happened that a
wealthy patient of this Doctor Petite de Saloon
slipped oft the curb-stone just by the doctors
door, and hurt his shoulder. He was carried
into the surgery, and the doctor, pronouncing
1t a case Of dislocation, set to work with jack
towels and other implements to replace the
ball into the socket. He pulled and pulled
till all his little strength was exhausted but to
no effect. He pulled again, with similar re-
suit just then, great Solomon, splashed and
bemudded from a long ride to visit the outly-
ing country patients, strobe into the surgery,
and was invited to inspect the impracticable
dislocation. After manipulating for a min
ute, he signaled his superior into the counting
room.
"Well 2" said the doctor.
"No dislocation," observed Solomon.
"NO!' exclaimed the doctor
"Not a bit of it-only sprain"
GOOD gracious Mr. Pickles, what's to be
done? Eve been pulling at that man this half
hour, and | can't convince him now to be con-
tent with an embrocation!'
"Never mind" says Solomon, ego on; pull
away! I'll stand behind, and when l say
There! do you say There ?"
The doctor was not quite satisfied, but he
knew his customer, and returned to the sur
gerry, throwing fresh vigor into his muscles as
he piled the jack-towel.
"There !" cried Solomon, suddenly, crack
ing one ofhis great fingers.
"There p cried the doctor, with beaming
satisfaction.
"There T' echoed the patient drawing a
deep breath. "Thank God / felt it fly to its
place, and herd the click All. you're
clever fellow, doctor. It's all right again
now, my dear DOCTOR"
"Not quite, sir" replied the doctor; 'I'll
give you little embrocation to apply-just to
strengthen the part, you know-and it will
soon be we'll"
That night the fashionable doctor gave Solo
mon five-pound note, the largest amount his
great hands had ever earned for him at one
time, and, this time, simply by the power of
their greatness