Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1859-04-13

AAlAAlI OObOA dlt0 OOS N
wanted the sunshine of Love to call up the i
HE huid and again importnew life and beauty. q
This scene-cold, desolate as it NAV seem G
was assiduously wooed by the zephyrs of q
gloom, and its nights, oftentimes nights of :
black darkness, We're sometimes made lumi- a
nous by the flames of the torch-light of angry =
meditations. :
1t was a desolate scene; a neglected garden
situated In a wilderness and one that revelled :
IN the glory of its primitive wildness and soil
tude. A wilderness whose soil was rich, from
whence sprang the best Of fruits as we'll as
the rankest of weeds, coming forth and grow
ing to perfection spontaneously for never
had horticulturist displayed his skill in this
wild garden spot; never had pruning knife
or shears trimmed into fantastic shape the
hardy shrubbery. No; there they stood
glorying in their natural exuberance and
graceful wildness. No broom of correction
had swept up the dead leaves of past errors,
which leaves had fallen during the autumn
and winter months of youthful inexperience;
but the cast off finery of the past formed a
soft carpet on which the shadows of the pres
ent played.
1t was a wild spot; yet despite all figures
or comparisons, it was a Heart-a Human
Heart-flled with varied and mingled feel
ings, without the will or ability to define
them rightly. 1t was a heart naturally warm
anu lHpuiSlVe, yet unLuuOTeu anu uuulSCl-
plined. 1t was a heart that yearned for SYM
pathy-and knew it not pleaded for afec-
ton, craved for congeniality, longed fora deep
draught Of the milk of human Kindness"
and longed, yearned, pined, craved. in vain.
Whence all the proud thoughts of that great
brain, and the cold feelings of that large heart?
Yea, she yearned in vain, as others have done;
have even past away, with hearts bursting
from very fitness; and the world knew it not.
WI IL Do4tauoD paOni InOU that faw
were the hearts that beat responsive to her
5 own: and it was the knowledge of this that
| oaused her to stand aloof from the world; it
! was this that drove her for companionship
, among the elite of Madame Natures most re-
e fined circles. Need we add that she was al
ways cordially welcomed No, we need not.
She loved her friends of the woodland, well;
the trees were her firm friends andsage coun-
:, sellers; the babbling brooks were merry play
n mates in lightsome hours; the flowers were
those gentle ones who awoke in her soul the
earnest desire to be good, and pure, and meek
y in heart; their soft voices whispered to her in
is the valleys-"Be lovely Ill heart" They
I'd called out to her loudly from the mountain
er tops-'Be lofty in thy nature;' and lofty she
It. felt conscious that she was. On the fair
IN plains the flowers counselled her thus-Walk
e- gently and straight forward crush nothing
e- that feels beneath thy feet; it was her ma
lure TO De SJIdlHLL-lOI W dEu, u W OO SCAlIlC,
n, she thought, at that time, almost an impossl-
de bility. All! she would sometimes exclaim,
it is too true the Ethiopian may not change
N his skin nor the Leopard divest himself of his
ar spots nor can | change my nature, much as
in desire perfection of character, oh! feeble
Igs one that | am. 1t did not occur to her that
MS there was One who at will can change all
things who from imperfect imperfectlon can
MS bring forth the most perfect perfection who
he teaches the potter to form from sordid clay
ain vessels of great use and beauty and who
nes Himself raises up angels of light and glory
al from a dark and degraded world. Oh NOR
els tails, light-hearted and vain, would it not be
gal better, much better for US, did we but think
the more upon these things? Yea, verify.
Tin. Yet did not the eloquent voices of flowers
p and warblers fall on a needless ear? Oh no
yer she listened and learned, and learned to love
be with all her learning. She heard the mock
nth ing-bird trill his enhancing lay till the wild
he'd monody called up glad emotions in her heart
tu- and it sounded in her brain long after still
ness had usurped tn. pipnstUalIas nj o ttfeeseuoh
the far, to a world of greater beauty than morta
rem eyes had ever seen. Fancy came, and hanC
art, in hand with thought explored a bright ant
IN beauteous realm, whose shores are not ap
cent preached save by those who have received
from genius, its lord and master, a passpor
to its scenes. She heard and dreamed till sh
|, as almost longed to throw off her nature ant
am become as a bird OF the air. ooh it mus
IS of be delightful" she thought, "to be free O
pain as free of mind 7" What journeying
ent- there would be, to and fro, throughout thi
'oud vast earth, could matter accompany mind ::
nam its perambulations.
|, in But why such thoughts They are vain
ouds yainer than vanity itself. Oh! | wish | coul
be like the flowers, gentle, and pure an,
hich meek. Yes, meek but that I cannot be
d to there is no use in denying it; | do love will
first rugged mountains better than smooth monot
ngs, onous plains | do love wild, dashing mour
tain torrent better than ameadow brook wit
the its low hum-drum songs and oh [ glory i
ling, a dark stormy night, when the thunders rol
and the lightnings fash, and the winds how
nder fiercely and shrek f~earfully around me.
own had much rather have the cold sleet drive il
cree to my face, than the pattering rain or tn
ct in tame dew which comes so Silly. A moor
'eace light scene-that ~favorite theme of Poets
esses every age and clime-is too dull for a natur
like mine. Somehow it enervateS me;
o re- grow dull and ~listless from sympathy with il
it throws a spell over all my senses, an indt
ones Enable witch-like spell. | feel like. takin
III no my guitar and playing some low soft tun
even something that corresponds with the hol
allied and the scene but it makes me miserable
held for then | dream of Love and Friendship;
ction sympathy, harmony and congeniality;
d de- happy flowers, whei, The loving and the love
ome- gather around Their cheerful ire-sides al
what pass away the long hours happily. But SUI
rable things are not for me. 1t is then | get N
S en- flower pots and arrange them around Il
own hearth I trim my lamp and make my f
TT of blaze brightly ! sit down among them, I
peo- own loved flowers, and if they have n
,ratu- brains and hearts, and do not talk and 81
kind to me, they cheer and soothe me; they ev
from smile on me-and advise me-my spirithes
stery. them; "Be good, be gentle, be meek a
nat is patient they whisper; yet Of all this |
: I am almost the reverse, | am almost a savage
epen- this fine land of civilization. ], the daugh
mira of atluence, residing but a few miles fir
have one Of the politest cities known in the civ
III not zed world, with my broad acres Of lal
reiess my heaps of bright gold, and numbers Of 5
e hol- wants who ever stand ready to come whel
will say come, or depart when | tell them 60
aloof The fair girls head dropped. Thought
nfully a time possessed her "a moment Ger,
thing face a tablet of unutterable thoughts v
lghts. traced, and then it faded as it came : a L
cold ment from her dark eyes, astrange light fla
quail ed with ftful CLEAN, and then waned out
dead itself-a moment more, and the head wasr
Gpor- al erect the old eynreSSion came back