The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1859-11-12

A story is told OF Dutch painter Helm
skerk, who died about 1922, that he left by
his will sum Of money yearly as dowery
for one young girl in his native village, or
condition that. on the day before her mar.
rage, she and her future husband SHOULD
dance upon his grave! This condition was
complied with for several years.
eyAbook about New England has Just
been published in Germany, in which the
author mentions. among other equally il
teresting facts, that thieves are SO scarce il
that country, that q reward is often Offered
for the discovery of one.
cyIf our young friend of the Democrat
wishes to prove himself real fire. enter, lei
him bite off his nose and swallow that. II
he can live FIVE minutes with such blazing
snlamander IN his belly without its burning
out, he will do to take command of the
South Carolina regiment.
rvS Said salesman in Milk street to q
new clerk, who had proved to be lazy
fellow, "ln your advertisement which led
our employer to engage you, you stated
YOU were not afraid of work - "Well,
amt" replied the shirk, laughing eno
matter how thick and heavy it comes it,
can't more me q peg. ...n. IT..
aHa --s>&--- o.. rt
cyThe Ohio State Journal says: "John
Brown is the father of twenty-five children
a force sufficient, itself. to take Virginia
and frighten the Shareholders every where.
We suppose some Of these children were
girls, but we don't think that would make
any difference. Women would scare the
Virginlans-'babes in arms would do it,"
-S~-s-
ESQ exuberant was the wit of Sydney
Smith that it broke out even on the mos,
solemn occasions. When bidding farewell
to a clergyman, who wns Just starting on a
Christian mission to one of tho Canniba
Islands, the, Reverend puuster, squeezing
his hand, said "My friend, hope YOU will
agree with the man who cats you.''
CT At College, the senior elias:
was under examination for degrees. The
professor Of Natural Philosophy was badger.
ing the boys in optics. The point under illus.
tra;ion was that, strictly and scientifically
speaking, We see not objects, but their ina
ges depicted on the retna. The worthy
professor. in order to make the matter plain.
r,said to the wag of the class, ''Mr. Jack.
son, did you ever actually see your father?'
-"No, SIR Bill promptly REPLIED
Please explain to the committee why yot
never saw your her."-"Because," re-
Piled Mr.. William jackson, very gravely
"he died before was born"
The Lancaster (Pa) Union tells {
good story Of the President. 1t seems tina
Mr.. buchanan, on tho train which late Dor
him from Lancaster to Columbia, on his wa,
to Washington, became interested in
and made up his mind to edo something
for him. On the arrival of the train a
Columbia. Mr.. Buchanan accosted tn
brakeman, when the following dialogue TOOL
place:
Mr.. '"Young man, are 20.
employed on this train ?"
Brak cman-s'les, Sir"
Mr.. Buchanan (patronizingly)-'Hov
would YOU like to have a situation at tn,
White House %
Brakeman (mischierous!y)- "Old man
your time is too Short:'
Mr.. Buchanan made tracks for the bridge
PHYSICIANS PRESCRIPTIONS.
F,GErsAMAN, (of the firm OF F. Geesaman Co,
wiigive dis personal attention to the careful and ac
curate cnnpouring Of Ply sicians Prescriptions Also
family receipts in the English, German, Latin ant
French Language" His long experience in this import
ant department of the Drug BUSINESS Jusifes us II
saying that entire satisfaction will be rendered The
greatest care and attention has been BESTOWED IN thu
eeleci.an Of Chemicals and drugs generally which