Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1859-07-01
Fatt, SIM ano .fantp.

re- Guard thyselffrom anger, because
its beginning is madness, and its end
repentance.
E=1' Unquestonably doafacss is gen
orally calamity In the company Of
some people it is decidedly blessing.
Leg Whose best works are most tram
pied upon2 A shoemaker's; because
good shoes last longer than bad oues
EE- The world should have ita docket
called, and sluggards all defaulted and
those should be the upper ten" whom
labor hath exalted
Eg- " Gently the dues are o'ep me
stealing" as the man said when he had
Eve bills presented to him at the same
time.
ES- A witty doctor SAYS that tight
lacing is public benefit, iaasmuch as it
kills off all the foolish girls, and leaves
The wise ones to grow up to be women.
Eg- A discovery has been made by a
modern writer, that, without a mouth,
man could neither cat, drink, kiss the
girls, ner chew any tobacco.
Eag- To incur heavy national debt is
TO mortgage the property of our postcr-
ty that We may be better enabled to de-
stroy or corrupt our contemporaries
Gg Chewing tobacco, smoking cigars
drinking whiskey to excess, and profane
swearing are evils that may be separated,
but they are more frequently united.
Re- Last Sunday, in Western vii
age, when the plate" was being passed
IN church, a gentleman said to the "col-
lector"-"Go on; I'm dead head-rve
got pass"
Eg" Only bachelors, should belong to
clubs. Hercules gave up his club when
he married Dejeneiar and all good hus-
bands should follow his example
SPIRIT OF THE Country Pass. We
have not seen dollar for nearly two
weeks. A word to the wise is sufficient.
State Exchange.
How TO WIN.-You win a woman by
appealing to.ber impulses-you win a
man by appealing TO his interests. 1t is
all the difference between compliment
and bride.
EE- MY DEAR" said wife to hel
husband, did you ever read of til,
plague in London 2" mo, | don't wan
to read of it; it is enough to have one
IN my own house"
-EE- A man had a sign up, "chea,
ladies shoes for sale here" He founC
that not a woman entered his shop. N,
wonder; the ladies' don't like to be calloC
cheap, they want to be called dear.
Eg Daniel Webster was once asked
BY an inquisitivc client, the exact mean
ing Of the word "Desinue. ," ''Sir,
said the Great Expounder," lyon
Creator never designed that you shout,
know, the meaning of that word p
Re- A down-east girl being bantcre,
one day by her female friends in regar,
TO her lover, who had the misfortune t,
have but one leg, she replied to them
very smartly Pooh | wouldn't have
man withtwologs; they're too commonp
REL always pick my company,
said suspicious character, turning from
company Of gentlemen to whom he
saw he was disagreeable. And theii
pockets too, when you get chance,
replied one Of them.
EE-- A lady said to her husband, in
Jerrold's presence /: My dear, you Ger.
tainly want some new trowsers" " No
think moi" answered the affectionatc
husband. Well" Jerrold intcrposed
i think the lady who wears them ought
to know"
1s- "Will you have it rare or well
done Z" said an Englishman TO an Irish
man, afcw days ago, as he was cutting
piece Of roast beef. II love it we'll
aone iver since l am in this country
replied Pat, "for il was rare enough we
used to ate il in ireland"
ny Tom--"Don't You think some
verses would touch her, Charley
beautiful poem" Charloy-"Oh, hang
your verses, Tom. IF You want to en-.
Joy life, drop poetry and the gals alto.
gether' and jinc FIRE company"
ES- Do you think YOU arc Ct 70
die y asked a msther of her poulec,c5
child :" don't know" said the EttlC
glri' taking hold cf her dirty dress will
her dirty fingers and inspecting it; 81
'gzess SO, if | amt too dirty"
ESS- Gontility is neither in birth, man
ner, nor fashion, but in the mind. A
high sense Of honor, determination
never TO take mean advantage of an
other, and adherence to.truth, delicacy
and politeness towards those with whom
YOU may have dealings, arc the csscntia
and distinguishing characteristics OF
gentleman