The Alleghanian. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1859-1865, 1859-11-24
WITAHD WlSD 0 N
H@- Mean men are subject to tight fits

| llVer theory are coSe-tle creatures.
DGg- 1t is folly to poison present bliss
by desiring that which cannot at present be,
raa- The recent railroad slaughters give
additional significance to the word ccr-nage.
Isy~ Between artlessness and heartless-
ness there is only the difference of an as
piration-
bituaily sleepy, that his curiosity cannot
be awakened.
Bszg~ 4 friend has adog so very serious,
that even his tail has not the least bit of
rag about it.
Ez23- We have seen ladies not only too
weak to bear food, but even too weak to
! bear contradiction.
Besg- The test Of friendShip-there is
nothing like prison pavement to ring
our old friends upon.
Reg- A suspicious man-he'd search a
! pincushion for treason, and see daggers in
a needle-case.
Eag- 1t may sound like paradox, yet
the breaking of an army 5 wings Is sure
way to make it ily.
s.sy~ An old saoker down East, accounts
for his perpetual thirst by the fact that he
was weaned on salt fish
Bsy- Ambition is journey mp hill, in
which rest can be taken only on peril of
sliding down BY ones own weight.
ss5- Women can easily preserve their
youth-for she who cal;;Yates the heart
and understanding never grows old.
R&5= The easiest and best way to expand
the chest IS, to have good, large heart
in it. Itsaves the cost ofsymnastics.
psa- Somebody says, wife should be
like roasted lamb-tender and nicely
dressed. \ scamp adds, and without
sauce.
nea- A man who had been married
twice, TO ladies both named Catharine, adj
yised his friends against taking dupli-
kates.
nga- OF those who travel the matrimo-
nial road, great many are completely ia
ded out before reaching their journeys end.
nsa- The man who took walk the
other day, brought it back again; the next
day, lie took ride, and went off with it,
aea- If you fall into misfortune, olsen
gage yourself as we'll as you can. Creep
through the bushes that have the fewest
briers.
Bsa. "There, John, that's twice you've
come home and forgotten that lard LA
mother, it was SO greasy that it slipped my
mind"
Bea-A man is brute to be jealous of
good woman-a fool to be jealous of
worthless one; but double fool to cut his
throat for either OF them.
nea- 1t is misplaced politeness to ask
full-hooped young lady to take seat in an
armchair. We prefer putting an arm to
the chair after the lady is in it.
sea- It is a sad commentary upon the
course Of instruction pursued in young la
dies schools, that the graduates seldom
know how to declsae an offer of marriage.
pza- \ negro lately fell from the upper
story of warehouse in Charleston, s. c.
a distance of about thirty feet, striking
head first on the top of a whiskey barrel. |
The result was-the barrel leaked
beg An administrator on the estate OF a
deceased female, in New Hampshire, ad- |
yertises for sale at auction The wearing
apparel Of Mrs y. O., deceased. CON /
sisting of one bed, two carpets, and one
sleigh"
BE- Never marry a man until you see |
him eat. Let the candidate for your hand |
pass through the ordeal Of eating soft-boil- .
ed eggs. If he can do it, and leave the
table-spread, the napkin, and his shirt un.
spotted, take him.
aea- \ colored servant, sweeping out a
room, found a sixpence.
which he carried to its owner "You NAV
keep it for your honesty" he said. Short
~ after he missed his gold pencil-case.
and inquired of the servant il he had seen
it. eyes, sar," was the reply. .And
what did you do with it 2" "keep um for
my honesty
geA- y traveller among other variations
OF wonders Of foreign parts, declared he
knew a cane mile long The companv
looked incredulous, and it was evident
they We're not prepared to swallow it. even
II II. II hao been sugar cane '!Pray what
hihu OF u cane was it?' asked a gentle
man, sneeringly. at was a burricana,, ,,
replied the traveller
Nsn- An Irish advertisement saws -
ward of 50 is offered for the apprehension
OF Patrick O. Flaherty, who last week
stole the Jackass, which same had on
plir of corduroy breeches, with blue ewes,
and smokes short pipe; much given to