Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1859-04-11
6Gortester 1ailp Spp,
HINTS ON Department AT HOME.


upon our manners. A lady is known more
surely by her manners than by her dress
Silks, velvets and laces can be bought with
money. The proprieties of life are learned
only by delicate tact, and an acquaintance with
good society.
Home politeness is rarely considered of so
much importance as it really is. We are too
often inclined to treat strangers with more re-
spect than those of our own household. Chill
dren, especially, are supposed to have no par
ticular claim upon our politeness, and are often
treated with as little consideration as the dogs
which they pet If we would have our chill
dren civil to ourselves and Others we must be
civil to them. A request is often better than
a command. A kind ''thank you" is a return
the smallest favor may claim. Children and
servants are entitled to our poiteness, as truly
as our guests and strangers.
If we would be civil abroad, we must be civil
in our homes. We must seek for the perfect
IN our manners, as in our morals; and nowhere
should we shed such radiance as when sur
rounded by those whom we love, and who
look up to us as patterns of what they should
be. Home should be the sanctuary Of all that
is hottest, of all that is attractive and charm
ing. There we should be the most agreeable
and lovely, and there we should endeavor to
develop our idea of perfection.
Ii we always practice what we know, we
shall be ever learning more. If we allow our
selves to become careless in our manners and
our mode of life, it will soon be obvious that
we are tending to barbaranism. We can
scarcely be too particular in regard to our
manners in private. A true lady is a lady
everywhere-in her own room, as surely as in
the most fashionable parior.
'feFhe greatest danger in home life" writes
Timothy Titcomb, Springs from its familiarity
Kindred hearts, gathered at a common firesde
are far too apt to relax from the common pro-
prieties of social life. Careless manners and a
careless attire are too apt to be INDUCED in
when the eye of the world is shut off, and the
ear of the world cannot hear" We must
have high idea of what we may be, that we
may continually strive for advancement "The
higher you aim the higher you will reach, is
a remark of Feneon that early imprinted it.
self on my mind and it has helped many times
to set my standard, where with no influence,
never could have planned it.
We should not be satisfied with ANYTHING
but the best to which we may attain. The
cares, the abors, and WEAKNESS of life often
tempt us to Encouragement, but we must be
of good courage. We must remember that
we cannot afford to lose any good which we
may have obtained. We mnst not suffer
our manners to deteriorate, but rather let
them improve, that we may be able to elevate
others who have possessed fewer advantages "
than ourselves
l have no liking for parlor with closed
shutters and doors, reserved for special occa-
sions, and so seldom used that the family hard
ly know whether they are at home or abroad
when in it. A parlor should be a cheerful,
family room, made as beautiful and attractive
as persons taste and means can make it.
Every parlor should be as individual as the
person who occupies it. / would not willingly
resign house into the hands of an upholster-
er. l might avail myself of his experience,
but should wishmy own taste to preside over
it. 1t always gives me pleasure to enter a
house unlike others l have been interested
to observe how much / can Judge of family
by the house they live in The simplest cot
tage may be made tasteful and attractive. 1t
does not require little more than an innate
sense of the beautiful. Some of the cabins of
the West have left an indeble impression on
my mind, as among the most picturesque
dwellings have ever seeen. One in North
ern Ohio, with its overhanging roof and grace
full drapery of vines, and the dear old grand
mother with her neat dress and plain cap,
standing in the door as passed. has never
been supplanted in my memory by any city
palace or country villa. Were | an artist l
would transfer the picture to canvass. would
rather live in such home, surrounded by
fine country, than in any stiff, ugly house,
built and furnished without taste.
While parlor should not be shut up from
sunlight and daily life, would yet have it
room beyond others in dignity. A certain at
tention to dress should be required of those
who enter it. The dress used for labor is
scarcely appropriate to the parlor but when
the duties of the day are over, think every
family should attend somewhat to their per-
sonal appearance, and pass the evenings to-
gether, away from the signs of toll which the
other parts of the house often present.
know it requires an effort to do this, but /
think the influence on ourselves and on our
children will more than compensate for the
tronble
The paror is no place for lounglng AL
ways endeavor to sit gracefully Do not drop
sideways into chair, with your dress all on
one side of it. Do not be in the habit of put
ting your feet on chairs and sofas. | have
seen young lady esconce herself in an arm
chair, with her feet upon the upper rounds of
another when gentlemen and ladies were pre-
sent, with as much nonchalance as she would
have done in the privacy of her own room.
She could not have given more decisive
proof of ill breeding than by the independent
manner in which she thus seated herself.
Do not take possession of the most comfort
able seat in the room, unless you are an in
valid or an aged person. Do not appropriate
a seat considered as belonging to another,
and, especially, do not retain it until that per-
son approaches you, or sets herself elsewhere;
land do not drop INTO II the moment she has
eft it, This is exceedingly annoying.
Do not go about humming or singing in an
other persons house. Step through the halls
quietly Keep your hands off the balusters
and walls in going up and down stairs, unless
you are so feeble that you need support. 1t is
enough to make nice housekeeper nervous,
to hear the sound of the hand slipping over the
bright varnish.
Let your manners be kind and respectful,
but never be patronizing Let your efforts to
please be so simple and natural, that they may
be agreeable Be observant and attentive to
the little wants of those around you.
Cantphrases are an abominaton, and should
rarely, if ever, be used. | confess do not feel
ashamed of my ignorance, when ! cannot I'M
derstand what they mean Use the best Ian
guage in common conversation.
Introduce, under ordinary circumstances,
gentlemen to ladies-n0t ladies to gentlemen.
Do not give a double introduction, as "Mrs.
Morehead, Mrs. Green: Mrs. Green, Mrs.
Morehead'-one mention of the name is sutfi-
cent As general thing, introduce the young
er to the older. Age is always entitled to re-
spect, Thus if Mr.. Morehead were the
younger, or in lower rank, say "Mrs. More
head, Mrs. Green" emphasizing Mrs. More
heads name. 1t is often well to mention the
place of residence when introducing strangers,
as that will naturally suggest topic of CONVEX
saton, without being compelled to resort to the
state of the weather-Agricuitwi