The weekly north Iowa times. [volume] (McGregor, Iowa) 1857-1867, 1859-12-28

= Eiat1kil nannflH
and stammers out an answer to the Ques.
tions, gradually and painfully making him
self out mighty bad fellew. The others.
who are blinded and cannot see, Of course
hold themselves in honor bound to speak
out the whole truth in such solemn place
rs they imagine this still to be--as they
cannot see how the scene has changed. At
each answer the G. G. says ''let it be re.
corded" and the recorder sings out in . low
hollow tone, as he writes it down in agrea,
book: ut has been recorded!' NoTE.--
The records in the book must he interest
ingl
During these questions the candidates are
tried, to test their ability to swim, to play
the drum or instruments--and it mtist be
amusing to see staid, sober citizens lying
down face foremost on the floor, and "strik.
ing ont" as if swimming for dear life from
Florida to Cuba; as well as going through
other tests OF a similar ridiculous charac-
ter. But then, each man thinks, we sup.
pose, that he must do as all good "Sons Of
Malta" have done before him, and therefore
he goes the whole figure.
After enottgh If tho above questions afe
asked and answered, the candidates take
another solemn obligation having reference
to the conquest Of Cuba, which is admins.
tered to thcin, i'll their blind state, while
each places his hand upon large book,
which is always carried in procession, and
which contains nothing but the pictures Of
two jackasses, one in the prime Of life and
the other in a rapid decline.
They retire, and so ends scene second.
SCENE THIRD.
The candidates are now brought in one at
a time, still blindfolded. Zach candidate is
brought in, rapidly marched around the
room double quick time between two guards
and is then made to run mp steeply in
clined ladder composed of rollers which are
set close together and which turn under his
feet at every step and makes his legs ty
past each other like spokes of run away
buggy--when he gets to the top Of the lad
der he lands upon platform, where stand
two more guards who turn him about and
tell him to sit down; he sits down, and they
give him shove down the ladder over the
rollers. Without any sled he rides this
way to the bottom of the ladder, where he
strikes springing board, Just as it is jerk.
ed up by two stout men, which sends him
with bound up towards the ceiling of the
room-as he comes down he is caught upon
the board in sitting posture-one OF his
legs is then pulled about, so that he is astrids
of the board; and in this condition he is
carried around the room in procession Of
the members while drums and gongs are
being beaten in most furious manner.
By this time the candidate, blind as he is,
begins to see through the matter; and gets
scared or riled according to the state of his
e. i,,t 4 -. ton 1nt 70 cfnr
After taking him round the room on
board, the G.. C. says, "let the cavern be
opened" and at that moment the board is
lowered at one end and hoisted at the other,
and the candidate slides down to the mouth
of large sheet iron Notwithstanding
! similar to the smoke-stack of STEAMBOAT
and as he slides down rough voice whis-
pers in his ear, Crawl for your life'-fol-
lowing this advice he crawls through the
thing, while all hands are pounding on the
! outside of it with sticks-tust as he comes
out he is taken again up the steep ladder
of rollers to the platform at the top. He is
now told to stand up straight, and divest
himself of all matter that will spoil by
coming in contact with water. While he
is being thus prepared for water the men,
bers have got ready large canvas sheet
I with rope around it; this is placed behind
him, and held outstretched by as many as
can get hold of the ropes; as soon as all is
ready, the candidate is thrown from the
platform back upon the sheet and away he
goes-up and down-no sooner down than
up again-ike Sancho Panza tossed in q
blanket the members get tired tos-
sing him, at which time he is let down upon
mattrass; from which he is lifted back
upon the platform where he is set upon the
|, top roller with his feet directed toward the
bottom: an umbrella without any covering
is then hoisted and given to him in his left
. hand, while in his right hand is placed q
cow-bell-he is told to hold to the umbrel
la and ring the bell, and thus he sails dowr
; over the rollers into tub, full of we
sponges, at the bottom. Here the blinds
, are taken from his eyes and he behold'
himself surrounded by about fifty persons
! in their shirt sleeves, all laughing at him
e At first the candidate is astonished, ther
e he gets angry, and finally he laughs will
: the rest, and ne becomes jealous membe'
a of the Venerable Order.
He is then instructed how he is to get in
to the lodge. He is instructed to come t
the outside door, sneeze twice and rap once
, at this the sentinel raises the slide or wicke
e in the door and the candidate says "Squi,
: to which the sentinel says Bob" thel
both say "Squibob," and the member en-
: ters. He then advances to the inside doc
n where he sneezes once and blows his nos
e and raps, at which the slide is lifted and tn
candidate says Lager" to which the sent
S mel responds Beer" and then both sa
E "Swei- Glass" and the candidate cntcrs-
proceeds to the center Of the room wher
II he flaps his two open hands at the top
}, his head, after the manner Of jackas
= tapping his ears, and takes his seat
j. These signs will give admission into an
), lodge of the Sons in the world if they al
J properly given.
e There are more of these ceremonies, bu
s these are the chief of them.
. or course we do not vouch for the trut
|, of all this, but it is probably true. W
= tell the tale as it was Id to us.