The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-11
THE INDEPENDEN PRESS.
The Art Of Living with Others.

In the first place. ifpcople are to live
""PP''y Together, they must not fancy, be-
cause they are thrown together now, that
n'' their lives have been exactly similar up to
the present time; that they started exactly
alike, and that they are to be for the future
OF the same mind. A thorough conviction
of the difference of men is the great thing To
bc assured of in social knowledge. It is TO
llfe what Newton's law is to astronomy
Sometimes men have a knowledge oft with
regard to the world in general; they do not
expect the outer world to agree with them
IN AL points, but are vexed at not being able
TO drive their own tastes and opinions into
| those they live with. Diversi,ies distress
them. Yet we might as well say ,"whv all
these stars; why this difference; why not all
one starr
Many Of the rules for people living togeth-
! er in peace follow from the above. For in
| stance. not 10 inteferc unreasonably with
| others, not TO ridicule their tastes, not to
| question and re.question their resolves, not
to indulge in perpetual comment on their
proceedings, and to delight in their havinr
other than ours, are AL 'l~e,i upon thor
ough PERCEPTION Of the silnle fact that they
are not we.
Another rule for living In: PLY with 9th
ers Is to avoid having stock ,uhjrc,s Of dis
pn'at'on. 1t mostly happens, when people.
live much together, that they come to have
certain set topics, round which, from Geunrn
dispute, there is such Il growth of angry
words, mortified vanity, and the like, thai,
the original subject of difference becomes n
standing subject Of quarrel; and there is Il
ten lcncy in all minor disputes to drift down
| to it.
Again if people wish 10 live well together
! they must not hold too much To loni,.. and
suppose that everything is to br settled, bv
sufficient reason. DIR. johnson SAW this
clearly with regard to married people, when
! he SAID, "Wrcc,hcd would be- the pair above
all manner OF wrctchctlness who should b,.
doomed to adjust by reason, every morning.
all the minute details of il domestic tlav."
but the application should he m,ch NOR.
general than he made il. There is no time
for such reasoning, and nothing that is
worth them. And when we recolecl how
two lawyers, or two politicians, can 90 on
c"n'cnding, and that there is no end of one
reasoning on any subject, we shall not hc
sure that such contention is the best mode.
OF arriving at TRUTH but certainly it is not
the way 10 arrive ut good temper.
II YOU would be loved as a communion
avoid unnecessary criticism upon those
with whom you live.
The number ofpeopfc VINO have taken ou,
Judges patents for themselves is very large
III any society. Now it would be hard for
Il man to live with another who was always
crI'lrls'ng his actions, even if it were kindly
and just criticism. 1t would be like ivinr
between the glasses Of a microscope. But
these selF-rlrctrd Judges, like their prototypes,
are apt t" have the persons they Judge
brought before them in the gusc OF culprit<.
One OF the most provoking forms OF crri-
ciSm above alluded to is ,la; which may be
called criticism over the shoulder. Had
been consnited'-"I1ad you listened TO me"
-"But you always wil''-and such short
scraps OF Sentences, may remind many of us
of dissertations which we have suffered and
Inflicted, and which we cannot call to
mind any with soothing effect.