The eastern clarion. [volume] (Paulding, Miss.) 1837-1863, 1859-02-19
A SLIM HOUSE.


A SLIM HOUSE.
BY SOL SMITH.
I'VE find, in the st. Louis Express, the
| following "reminiscences of Mobile, in 1870
by the veteran Sol Smith. In an eXplana-
tory note he says: eve were performing
in temporary building, hastily fitted upto
receive the company, after the burninS"i
the Government street Theatre, and loca-
| ted by my partner, Mr.. Ludlow, away out IN
the Orange Grove; that veryworthy co-part-
ner of mine, fondly imagining the Moobl-
| lians could be induced to 90 there-but
| they couldn't ."-M0JHc Mercury.
In the course of my management, 1t
| may be well supposed that my receipts
| have on some occasions been very small;
but it has seldom happened that per-
| Torrance has taken place without the
| presence of a dozen or two who paid for
| their admission. 1t will be seen by what
am now about TO relate, that in one in
stance, a performance took place, lat least
in part) before about the smallest paying
| audience on record.
1t was very rainy night. The play adj
| vertised was "Tortcsa, the Usurer," with
| Mr.. +. Conner as the star, after which
| the celebrated Herr Cline was to 20
| through with his wonderful feats on the
| tight rOpe-the performance to conclude
! with the farce of the "RendeWous"-
| Conner was to receive. and did receive
| $50 for his nights services; Herr Cline
was to get one clear third of the receipts.
and our nightly expenses were two hum
bred and fifty dollars. Contrary to my
usual custom, | did not 90 to the theatre
in the early part of the evening having
no part to play in the first piece. but al
about nine o'clock | wendell and ua{ed
my way thither, and found the curtain
just falling upon "Tortesa." Herr Cline
dressed for his performance, met me as |
entered.
"Ohl for Gods sake" said he implor-
ingly, don't compel me to dance to this
handful of people-the night is so bad,
there are not.twenty dollars in the house.
Come let me ofi-dismiss the audience
and let them 60 home"
| In this petition he was Joined by all the
actors who had parts in the afterpiece.
This is all very well, " said /, ito ask
me to dismiss the audience, but YOU for
get that this handful of people have
come nearly a mile, through the pitiless
storm. on the promise held out in our
bills. No, no--itthey require the perform
ance in full they shall have it. | am will
ling, however, if they are entirely sati-ti-
ed to receive their money bacB-but not
otherwise-to abandon the rest Of the
programme and let you all 90 home Be
fore putting the question to the audience,
however, / must consult my partner"
As passed across the stage to the Box
office, | cast my eve through hole in the
curtain, and could discover in front, not
more than a dozen faces, counting bar
keepers, dead-heads and all. | found
Mr.. Ludlow sitting on high stool in the
office, looking as melancholy as an I'M
dertaker in healthy season.
"What are the receiptsY ! asked.
Guess" said he
| guessed fifteen dollars.
"You have guessed just fourteen dol
lars above the mark" said Mr.. Ludlow
throwing down two half dollars upon the
shelf where the money was taken in.
"Only one ticket sold ?" gasped |.
Only one ticket sold" remarked Mr.
Ludlow coolly. again iingling the two
half dollars upon the shelf, to give me
full assurance that what he said was exact
ly true.
And a five act play has been given TO
the one discerning and discriminating
| purchaser Of that single ticket | re-
marked.
Exactly 50" said L. "You know our
: rule No postp0nemca. D, account Of ,rsa-
, | Her.'"
! ''Stop little" | suggested: "I'll 90
and see this gentleman-he may bc
bought off; and away went into the front
I of the house. | soon found the gentleman
p seated in the centre of the parquette.
, | listening very attentivelv to IAN overture
by the orchestra which formed a part of
the programme upon the bills of the eve
ming.
Z quite a rainy night, sir" | said, adj
dressing the attentive listener to the over
ture, seating myself at his side He did
mott reply except by polite inclination OF
e the head.
t you will, | hope. excuse the request !
\ am about to make of YOU, said /. as soon
as the overture was tinished-(auOthe
nod from the gentleman )-"but it being
+ rs remarked, quite a rainy night, our eff
+ forts here" (pointing to the stage) have
4 not been so well rewarded rs the attrac
n tons offered might seem to deserve;"-
(anOther nod Din brief, sir. V0,t are the
the only individual in the house who has
; paid for admission; mod and we ask il
5 as a favor that you will receive back yom
! money, and relieve our actors from fur
tAASlS4S5ttOils ~ dIlluse you ~ ~ SAA4A4ks
- Several emphatic Tpds1,nd one or tive
,hrugs of the shoulders were the only re
/ sponses that received to this civil speech
q | After waiting a moment for an answer II
,r0rdS, | ventured to repeat my rcques
c that he would receive back his money, al
G the time rendering the identical hal
, dollars Mr.. Ludlow had been iingling tn,
! whole evening. The gentleman stared a
the money, and then at me, as if he wa
at loss to understand the meaning o
g my words and action. 1t suddenly occur
red to me that the gentleman might be
little hard of hearing, 50 placI& n,
n mouth close to hi, ear, again requisite,
:: his acceptance of the money and demand
f. ed his permission to omit the rcmainde
Il of the performance. Thus adjured 70
~ the third time the gentleman at lengtl
/. opened his mouth. set his tongue in mo
d ton, and spoke as follows:
"a Monsieur, .je ne coHprc,ds pas va nat dc e
,e que vo'lS dites: mas c suppose que ro"S lrll
a. dc excellent representation, Ct dams c. c1S J
n s1ds daccori ayec c0uS-c'e.t s1per5s! Mons
Il ear Conner est an js07e acts,T cbamsud,
a Madame Furen est dciciugc.''#
q Mastering up the very limited kow
=, edge possessed of French language, afto
Is imparting to him the information that
70 was one Of the directors of the theatre,
20 managed to let him know what it was
If wanted of him, which he no sooner con
pretended than he acceded to my requeS
with the greatest readiness so far as It
hitting his claim to the rest OF the PEE
es Torrance; but in my bad French | foun
II | IT utterly impossible to persuade him
ne take back his dollar. The polite Frencl
Ut man lighted his cigar at the door, hoiste
or his umbrella and went forth, calling bac
ne | tome-"B5 soir, Monsieur ic dtr1ctrr;
le u'dis pas con,pria le language ID rotrc piece
IL naiS Gle ctah bicl jg5lcE-trcs tisJ, j0tce.-
a | Madame Fdrrfp est 7Dlc SVt7ldtdc dctrict.-
&C. Bon soir, Monsieur le Director"
OF So there had been large company
m actors and actresses PEI forming a play
is five acts to the bare walls, two or thr,
he barkeepers, dozen dead-heads and OF
he paying auditor ,rko could not ,o5drstu'a
i'll ,cord Of tie English Language.
N #"Sir, do not understand a word yo
n say; but | suppose you are remarlr
ar, upon the excellent performance,
lii which case / agree with you-it is superl
Mr.. Conner is fine young actor, and Nh
ID Farren is delightful
Sc +" Good evening, Mr.. Manager; | ha'
ut not understood the language of your pee
nd but it was well played-very well playe
on Mrs Farren is a splendid actress. Goo
evening, Mr.. Manager.
A GANG OF FoRGERs.-The Huntsvil
Ter. Item, relates the swindling dee
IN there of four fellows calling themselv
re, Alfred, Albert and augustus Wilso
an and Samuel Morton, who settled dow
up, there, commenced business, passed {
in drafts on New York 10 some amount, al
lrd then suddenly left. The drafts came ba'
les from New York protested, and it was d
in covered that the ''four" were forge
.he They had before swindled the people
The Indianola out of 81 900, andvarious 9th
ted property; at Hampstead, out Of a hor
the and buggy; at Waco. out of saddles al
an horses besides passing more forged not,
be Alfred was accidentally recognized
his his true character, by a person who Ia
sol pened to be present, Just as articles
us agreement were about to be signed !
tween Alfred and Mr.. Edmonds, hot
keeper at Paris. Lamar county. and /