Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1859-03-25

re" Women, in general, are worth
more than men and, in fact, cur vices
cause the defects Of woman. Almost all
their vices belong to us; while their
virtues and good qualities are theirs
and theirs alone
GS- A Lady writing from Texas,
speaks of waking up one morning and
finding herself in bed with serpent. -
a great many ladies have found them
selves in the same predicament and
some gentlemen.
GD' A Quaint writer says: 81 have
seen women SO delicate that they are
afraid b ride, for fear of the horses run
ming away; afraid to sail, for fear the
boat should upset; and afraid to walk for
fear the dew might fall but never saw
one afraid to get married"
re" Sir Walter Scott declared that
these four lines, by Robert Burns, were
worth thousand romances.
Lad VIC never lov'd sac kindly
Had we never lov'd sac blindly
Never met--or never parted -
We had ne'er been broken-h hearted.
ES~ "Who made your inquired II
lady teacher of a lubbcrly boy who had
lately joined her class.
81 don't know" said he.
Don't know You ought to be
ashamed of yourself-a boy fourteen
years old There is little Dick Fulton
ho is only three, and he can tell, | dare
say. Come here, Dick who made your"
a" Dod," lisped the infant prodigy.
4" knew he would remember. 4"
We'll he oughtcr," said the stupid
boy; lit mint but little while ago since
he was made
A SCENE IN SCHOOL ROOM, The
Springfield Republican is responsible for
the following:
Come here, George, | wish to exam
inc you in punctuation. What's that
George-That that's a comma.
Mistress Right; now what's that?
George-Ah. now you've got me
where my hairs short; l dun kno.
Mistress-Goorgc, | do not wish you
to use any slang phrases here When
YOU are unable to give correct replies
say so, but do not repeat such phrases as
that which you have just used Now,
what's that?
George dun kno.
Mistress know what that is +?
Why that's period
Gcorge-OIookiug critically at the
point in question IIa ha Now I've
got you where your hairs short; hat
amt aahia only Ry.diH!
Mistress (Re-examining critically J
George you are dismissed.
San Honest Man, where Is hel
Not long since a letter was sent to
Chicago, from Toledo, directed to IAN
Honest Man" This letter, it seems, is
SGoing the rounds. II WAS received at
our city postofiice to-day. Chicago sends
the letter to Cincinnati, saying that no
such man resides there" Cincinnati
sends it to New York, saying "search
Wall street for the owner" New York
sends it to Sing Sing, saying the post
master will find him there, as he has
several years yet to stay. Sing Sing
sends it to st. Louis, saying that he lives
there certain st. Louis replies that
there is no such man there give it to
aome special agent, and send il to Mil
waukee. Milwaukee says that he has
ust left the city for Auburn, and sends
thther with instructions to the postmas-
ter at Auburn to deliver it at once to III,
Rat Hole" as It must be some of In
speotor Bailey's appointecs. Auburn
says it is refused at the "Rat Hole
and remarks on the authority Of "Coppe
Iohn." that he has gone to Syracuse =
yracuse replies there is no such person
age here, and sends it to Rochester, witt
Instructions to try II Butts ON tn
wrappcr' he will claim it Sgreps
ilnaai