Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1859-03-01
Git8its

Gy-The golden rule contains the very
life and soul of all genuine politeness.
GgThe woman who neglects her hus
bands shirt fronts is not the wife OF his
bosom.
~B Before you commit suicide take a
cold bath. What people term despair is
very often dirt
EN-"John, has the doctor arrived?'
Yes, SIR" "Then go Immediately for
the undertaken"
Ey Nothing is more favorable to love
than a little discord-as the frost makes
the grapes tender and rich.
EELean liberty is better than fat
slavery-or, as the poet says:
4 day-an hour Of virtuous liberty,
liz worth whole eternity OF bondage!
Gs~"Hallo stranger-What time is it?
How high is the creek? What's the price
Of r.''-"Past eleven; waist deep;
eleven pence"
Ry-An exchange says that an old sheer
gave, birth to lamb, in Cambridge las
week, belonging to a widow lady with six
lcgs and fine wool all over her head.
E1y-"My son, what would you do if
your Hear father should be suddenly taken
from you?"
.'Swa and cbaw tobacker."
Exs- A story is told of a merchant stay
ing at an inn, whom the boots, by mistake
called at an unusually early hour. ''Sir,
said the boots, ''the day is breaking.
.Zounds, then let it break, it owes me
nothins!"
Ey-A London witness ha, ing described
himself as "a penman," was asked II
what departna of literature he wieldeC
his pen? He replied that
.'He penned sheep in the smithfeld
market
Eg-Life is what we make it. Let us
call back images otjov and gladness, rather
than those Of grief and care. The latter
NAV sometimes be orr guest to sup anr
dine, but le; them never be permitted to
lodge with u.s.
Rs-The Woodsocket Patriot" heads
its marriages thus:
Here thc girl and here the widdcr
Always cast their earliest gl: ce,
And with smiling face consider
To make some clever fellow double
In bliss, aid often, too, in trouble.
SLrGnTLY Personal the close of
the sitting of the House of Representa-
tives at Springf, Id, Illinois. last week, the
Clerk read the following:
Il am requested to announce that Rev
Dr. Mcfarland will deliver lecture this
evening in this Hall, on the Education OF
IDIOTS Mmders Of he Legislature are
invited tn ate, d!'
re- Mr.. PuIlup, coming home at .wo
o'clock in the morning, with little toe
much rye aboard, finds sleet accumulated
on the sidewalk. He slips up and comes
down with settler, when he is heard to
exclaim: "V-ve-Iy sing'lar, wh-wherevor
water freezes it allus fr-freezes with the
s.-slippely side up--dem'd sing g'lar."
EH-A Dutchmsn in one of the middle
counties Of Pennsylvania wanted a minis
ter to preach at his child's funeral, and
wasn't nrtasonably particular as to who
came. "Chon," said he, "go and tell the
circus preacher 10 come, and if he can't
come, den get de locust preacher, and il
de locust preacher can't come, why den
get de extorlioner," exhoIter.
FoR ToBAcco- -CHEwERs.-An old maid :,
who has more reverence for the Inspiration
she draws from Helicon than for that i'm
ported from Havanna, writes in The follow
ing style of the patrons of the weed:
May neverIady press hslips,
Who makes furnace of his mouth,
And keeps its chimney burning;
May each true woman shun his sight,
And none bat those who smoke themselves,
Havs kisses for a smoker
AI,uprAcr, ca.
two ra unal beings, in the glow of youth
aud hope, which invests life with the halo
at happiness, appear together and openly
acknowledging their preference for each
other voluntarily enter into a league of
perpetual friendship, and call heaven and
earth to witness the sincerity of the sol
emn yows-to think of she endearing con-
nection, the important consequences, the
final separation, the smile that kindles to
extacy. as their union must Mt length be
uuenched in the iears of mourning!-but
while life continues, they are to partici-
pate IN the same Joys, to endure the like
sorrows, to rejoice and weep in unison
This Is he most interesting spectacle that
social life exhibits.
ATSome fidgely old ladies, III a quiet
neighborhood in New York city, made the
discovery that late every night man came
wiisting down the street to respectable
boarding house, where a door WAS opened
by young lady. and he was admitted into
the house, after gi' ing her salute that
shocked II Ell, (,l e old ladie's) ideas OF
propriety They forthwith resolved into
committee Of the whole, aud calling upon
she landlady, informed her of what they
had seen, aud of the "talk' it was crea-
ting in Tive neghborhood. fhe landlady
requested them To- 90 about their business.
Informing them that the man works on a
morning paper, aud his wife. dear soul that