Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1859-11-15
Git 8its.
=. w Question for discussion: Cana
big man ache harder than little man?

a = ER. Question for discussion: Can
big man ache harder than little man?
EEIf you wish to cure scolding wife
never fail to laugh at her with all your
might until she ceases-then kiss her,
Sure cure and no quack medicine:
EE"Who is that lovely girl?" said the
witty Lord Norbury, in company with his
friend, Counsellor Grant. "Miss Glass,
replied Grant. 81 should often be intoxi-
cated. could I place such a glass to my
lips" said Norbury.
EE In late trial for the amount of a
tailor's bill. ii appeared that the clothes
supplied did not fit the defendant
"fhen," observed the judge, "we must
proceed occurding to the iertuiloronis, and
the plaintiff must be nonSuited."
EgA lady at sea, full of apprehension
in gale of wind, cried out, among other
exclama ions: ~"We will go to the bottom!
Mercy on us, how my head swims!"-
MADAM, never iear,' said one ofthe sail
ors; "you can never 60 to the bottom while
your head savms."
EEA late emigrant to Pixies Peak, be-
fore leaving Leavenworth, wrote on his
wagon. "root hog OF die" A few months
afterward, he was observed returning
Before starting from Cherry Creek he took
some tar and stick and wrote under his
first motto, "that hogs dead"
wA boy and girl of tender years
were dispu.ing as to what their "mothers
could do" Getting impatient. the little
damse blurted out by way of climax and
a clincher: "Well there's one thing my
mother can do that yours can't-my
mother can take every one OF hel teeth out
at once!'
Eg"I say. Sambo, was you ever intox-
icated?" "No. julius. neber." "Was
you?" "Weil | was. Sambo.' Didn't
it make you feel good, Julius?" Yah! -
But oh solly! next morning tho't my
head was a woodshed and all de nIg-
gers in Chris!eudom we're splitting wood
in it, ~
EE"Mr. Wigg5es; have you got a
match?" eyes, sir, a match Tor the old
boy" Thar she is, mixing up dough-"
Wiggles pointed to his wife, and then slid
from the front door. The last we saw Of
Wiggles he was kiting down the road,
holly pursued by red-headed woman
with cistern-pole. Poor Wigges!
FAt small town up the river. a
young lawyer, who thought himself
''some," made certain proposals at town
meeting. which were objected TO by far
nner. Highly epraged. he said to the far
mer, "Sir, do you know that l have been
at two universities, and at two colleges in
each university?" "WeIl. sir" bald the
farmer, "whal of that? l had calf that
sucked two COWS, and the observation
made was that the more he sucked the
greater calf be grew"
Cyan avaricious fellow in Brussels
gave large dinner recently. just as the
guests sat down a piercing shrek was
heard in the court yard. The host hur-
ried out and returned pale, affrgh ed, and
his hands covered with blood. "What is
lt?" was the inquiry. "A!as!" he said a
poor workman, father Of "a large family,
has met with terrible accident. He was
knocked down by cart and grievously
wounded. Let us aid him" A collec-
ton was taken up and the guests contrib
uted l 200 francs. Generous souls! 1t
was the miser's ruse to make them pay
for the dinner. ... a...... ..... ..
EH-"Widow Mournful. what on airth
are you thinking about?' Nothing else
in the world but my departed husband
He was such devoted man--always
bringing home his little kindness TO me
! couldn't help thinking just now, when |
heard Mrs. Browns sassiges sizzling.
about What Mr.. Mournful used TO do me
He knowed was fond of sassiges, and he
hardly eyersomedeyer come home in his
life without fetching me sassige in his
pocket. He was fond of eggs himself, and
would occasionally fetch a few OF them for
himself. But he was always sure never
to forget the sassiges, and I'd ask, Isl
mon, where is your eggs?" Just as like
as not he'd been a-setting on 'em''
A PRIsoNER's ETIoUErr.-A curious
case of prison etiquett recently occurred
in Delaware. A number Of prisoner.
broke jail. and among them was on,
named Turner, under sentence Of death fol
rape. He called upon the Attorney Gen
eral. coolly seated himself in his Office
and informed the gentleman that mum
Der Of prisoners had escaped. among then
himself; that he was prepared to 60 bacl
again whenever he could be assured tina
he would be safe in SO doing. Several o
his social companions lad been discharged
and IN their stead woman had beer
placed in Jail who was afflicted with TIL
scarlet fever; he had formally notified th'
Deputy Sheriff that if such conduct wa
persisted in he would feel obliged t
change his quarters; and that receiving n
satisfactory evidence on the part OF tn
officers of the Jail that his grievance
would receive attention, he had thu
ayaied himself of the first favorable op
portunity of giving practical turn to hi
Indignation by leaving the premises. II
did not care straw about the sentence c
death hanging over him, but be didn