Civilian & telegraph. [volume] (Cumberland, Md.) 1859-1875, 1859-05-12
90it QuN 3ljumur.

The VOICE OF TIE WHANG-Doo !
''whang-doodle, y hard-shell preacher wound
upa flaming sermon with this magnificent po-
rJatUn 4,
| My brethrng aud sister ef mans fall
| Of religion you cant hurt him There was,
| tile three Arabian children; they nut 'e,n in
q fiery iuInice, Letted seven times hotter than
! it could be Lct, and it didn't singe bar on
! their heads. And there was j ohm the Evan
geler; tie put him-and where do you think
brethcrn and sstern they put him? Why
! they put him in calaJlronic of Dilen. lie and
billed him all night. and it diln't. tdzs his shell
! And there was Dan'el; the they put him in
a lions dcn-and what, ny fellow travellers,
and respected aIb.5Qrics, DO you think he was
put into the Hons Gen for? Why, for pray.
ing three times day. Don't be alarmed
| bretlrlng and sistern | dont think any Of
you will ever set into q lions den"
Who made you? inquired lady teacher
of a iUbbery boy, who had lately joined he.
class
| Il don't know said he ~---s@--.
| Of yourself; q boy fourteen years old There
is little Dick Fulton; he is only three and he
can tell dare say. Come here Dick who
made your
/ God" lispel the infant prodigy.
II knew he would remember"
"Well, lie oughter," said the stupid boy"
it amt but little while ago since he was made.
NE A spirit Of cheerfulness should be en-
couragedi in our youth five would wish to
have the benefit of it in our old age. Time
will make generous wine more mellow, but
turn that which is early on the fret to vine
gar.
ge3"'' Mrs, aunty got bees in her mouth?"
NO, why do you ask such a question:"
cause that gentleman with heap of hair on
his face cotch'd hold of her and said he was
going to take the honey from her lips; andshe
said, 'Wcll, make haste"
Jcffwly ain yea like tho cedar? ] guys
it up, Sam cant tel you. Kase you stay
green both summer and winter.
Why IS a lady putting on her corsets like
a man who drinks TO Drown lis grief? Be-
cause in solaci"g herself she get gets tight.
| A rascaly bachelor says" The friendship.
ortwo women is always plot against the
third.
! Some writer says marriage is like eating NJ
onion YOU shed tears and eat again,
Miss Long, Il girl ofctick lnd fearless wit,
asked Moses il he knew 1. certain young
nan Know him? Oh. yes | ought to
know him Irased him from a pup" .""Ahw
said Miss Long, 81 didn't know you were so
old cur. Hoses wilted
y Toast. IN exchange says that the New
England Society of Minneapolis, in Minneso-
to, had celebration on the I'D of December,
and the following Is enc ofthe sentiment Of
iGrCd:
'THE LIVE YANKEE.-IIcs driven his
kcows to pasture all over the Continent; keep
Ing school i'll Australia peddlin Cherry Pic
! ftora in China; playing, Yankee Doodle In
Japan; opening a land Office in Arizona kissin
! Queens everywhere, and making himself at
home generally without invitation.
| Why should potatoes grow better than 9TH
cr vegetables? p? Becauso they have eyes {,
see what they arc doing
| A farmer charged hired man with having
an offensive breath. "rhunder and light
ming" said the employee, "do you expect
man 10 breathe musk roses for six dollars u
mpnth?'
Hearing rhysicrn remark that small
! blow would break the nose, a rustic exclaimed,
well donno bout that. + We blowed my
nose great many times, aud l've never broke
it yet"