Muscatine weekly journal. [volume] (Muscatine, Iowa) 185?-1890, 1859-03-25
s HOP PIN q:
Oh, HOW SIZE GOT RID OF HIM.

j
screw, although he is as rich as Cr@-
sus," said Julia Gushington, bursting
into tears.
"You shall never marry Cart. Mont
geometry, because he is as poor as job
said old Gushington, bursting out OF
the room as her friend, Mrs. Major
Manager, entered it.
"Good Gracious! Julia, what is the
matter 20 said Mrs. Nj. "Why your
eyes are as red as ferrets, and you'll
burst the buttons off your polka if you
sigh so desperately"
And Julia told her all-how she low
cd tho ''bold dragoon, with his saddle,
bride, long sword,'' and little more
than his pay; how her father refused
to have him for a son-in-law and how
Mr.. Youngscrcw, stingy, gingery,
bandy-lcgged BOBBY, had proposed and
been accepted by old MIR. Gushington.
The case seemed desperate to Julia-
not so to Mrs. Major Manager.
"My DEAR" said the old campaign
er, s'dry your eyes, and leave all to mo.
Dress yourself as becomingly as you
can. receive MIR. Youngscrew, with mods,
and becks, and wyeathod smiles, and
then"
"Then what ?" exclaimed Julia,
opening her beautiful blue eyes to their
utmost.
"And then we'll take him out a shop
ping. My nieces, Arabell., Emma,
and Clara, are going, as you know, to
join their brother in India, and have
promised them part of their outfit
You shall buy all under my direction. "
s'But what has that to do with my
marrying Charloy-I mean Captain
Montgomery? ?"
"Oh, it's Charley, is it?" thought
Mrs. M, "then there is no time to lose.
There's knock at the door, and there
is Mr.. Youngscrew and his brougham.
Do as I tell you, and trust to my expe-
rienee."
Julia, like good girl as she was,
obeyed her knowing old friend and
presently appeared, locking more beau
tiful than any lady in the Book Of
Fashions. Youngscrew (who, blythe
by, was quite as bad-looking as Julia
had painted him) stood agape with ad-
miratidn, and actually perspired with
ecstacy when the ladies graciously solic-
tied his company to Swan 4 Edgar's.
The clock struck one as they entered
that Paradise of women. Mr.. Young
screw would have retired, but the la
dies knew he had taste, and desired the
benefit Of it. They were soon seated,
and the solemnity began. Dress ate,
dress was opened, discussed, and reject
ed. With a patience worthy of the
cause, did the highly-respectable young
curate-looking gentleman behind the
counter, seek to satisfy his fastidious
customers, and at length succeeded.
Mr.. Youngscrew thought the price
Che said so days afterwards) a stiff Jun.
The ladies scarcely made it a question
Then the trimmings
Twenty yards Of ribbon OF two shil.
lings yard
MIR. Y. could not understand fol
what it was wanted.
Sixty yards of braid OF one shilling
yard!
Mr.. Y. began to sum in mental arith
metic:
Twelve yards Of lining at sixteen
pence yard
Good gracious Could she have got
as much as that about her, as there sh
sat upon the chair before him? If so
how much Of that glorious heap wa
Swan l. Edgar, aud how much julia
Gushington?
Twenty-four enamel buttons at fou
shillings each!
By jingo! She had twenty-four OF
her dress at that moment, for Young
screw began to count them.
Skeins Of silk !-sewlng cotton =
gimp !-whalebone hooks and eyes
silk fringe -
Youngsrew became mute as fish
He felt inclined to scream when the Gu
rate asked: els that all to- day 20
Call"
Mr.. Youngscrew should think So
and he did.
The clock struck four as the trio lief
the shop-Mr. Youngscrew, pale al
white sarsenet at the scene he had wit.
messed, the ladies radiant with the con.
seriousness Of having fulfilled SO fal
their woman's mission.
''We shall see you again, to-mor-
ow;" said Julia to her admirer, with
one Of her very sweetest smiles, Gal
eleven"
Mr.. Youngscrew, who suffered
slightly, could only bow his rapture.
and depart.
"Dose number one," said Mrs. Ma
jor Manager. "We will make Emma's
purchase tomorrow; the day after that,
Clara's; the next day, you shall make
me q present of mantilla, and posi-
bly, you may want something for your
self-eh, dear %
Of course she did-who ever heard
of girl of twenty who did not.
MIR. Youngscrew went to bed that
night, but not to sleep. Mental arith-
metic engaged his attention for many
hours, and when he did doze, it was to
dream of read wreck oners and demons
in white chokers.
Need we prolong our story? No.
Day by day, as proposed by the art
full MJoress, did she submit Young
screw to the torture, until he looked
upon Swan & Edgar's as fashionable
inquisition. Each night he slept less.