The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-11-25
VOLUME VII.---NO. 80
z x Q Il r p Ta.

The WATERS EpIrApH.-sComins'
comingr
Bow to destiny. One Of, these DAYS he
may be polite and return your bow.
What wind should hungry sailor wish
tort One that blows fowl and chops about.
1t seconds were not much fonder Of duels
than their principals, duelling would very
soon be obsolete. -s
Nothing prevents person for being ns..
tural and easy, SO much az an extre,na
anxiety to appear so.
What would our day be wi,hou, it,
morning and evenings twilight A fierce
and burning eye without lid.
1t an egg could speak, and you were to
ask t whence it came, wha. sweetmeat
would it name, in reply Ma.nc-laid.
AS the organ ofspeech .upposcs the
organ of hearing, so the instinct Of com.
plant supposcs the eentimebt Of compa..
sion.
Brown being asked what was the first
'h'ng necessary towards winning the love
OF woman, answered, 'An opportunitv.'
half the secrets in the world are disclo.
sed IN order that those who possess them
may let their friends know thattKey hold
them.
Why is fool in high station like man
in balloon Z Because everybody appear.
little TO him, and he appears little 10 every
body.
Believe misfort uue quickly. A man is
like an egg-the longer he is kept in ho.
water the harder he is when taken out.
Years are the sum of hours. Vain i. it
at wide Intervals to say, III save this year,
II at each narrow interval you do not say.
III save this hour,
What are you fencing that pastur fort
Forty acres of it would starve a cow
Certainly, and so am fencing it 10 to keep
my cows OUT
1t seems. that there is lots of finance in
turkey, but no money. The poor Sultan
must say TO himself r.My Porte aon,.aie is
in desperately bad state!' a.
A man has just published a book, ad.
v'sng all men to mind their own business
Why doesn't he mind his, instead Of tell.
ing other people what 10 dor
oh, dear" blubbered an urchin who
had just had an application of the birch
'oh, my !they tell me forty rods make fur.
long, but Two just found out that one rod
makes An acher (acre),
A doctors wife attempted to move him
by her tears-'Ah ! said he, steara ara sise-
less. | have, analysed them. They con.
tain little phosphate of lime, some chic
rate of so,ium, aud waters
Fifty guests once ate everything certain
man had in hishouse. The next g,isst,bs
turned out by simply pointing to his date.
box. What was the date ?-Maro6szth
'5e. {MaTch forth fifty a,ey
The most amusing man in the. world is
Frenchman in a passion. gar, you.
call my wife woman t-two three several
times once more. an will call youlbe
vateh az house, and blow out your brains;like
a candle.' .,sssr.s-.i
IA gentleman was walking along The: Bir.
kenhead docks one day.. when his attention
was directed to the floating ckurcb.-'Ab,'
he exclaimed, 1see it's High or Low Church
according to the state Of the tide
.MosEE AND rovERrx.-A shrandoid
once 4 said to his daughter, BE
sure my dear. @you never marry q peoss.
man; but remember, the poorest man ID 10
The world is one that has money, and moth.
What's 6olosk + Inquired assysssl,or.
nothing, answered his conpaiop.
With feafe confidence. What do you
neat e asked theArave|tet-- No. quite one.
md i follows in course that what,isn,t one
next to nothing. -; :
!. A son Of the Emerald Isls,son ksssup
otdshat tn friend Of his had put lis ilid6sy
nto The stocks, feplied, ooh, apfits ,tbsfs
'esssai Tre.b. an kniver had arthid,Ja
he'stocks; but. bsS The holy poker, I,ssRa
ne brogdes there ofteueft Han i liksa. .sate.
"a sr y minister st st yesss v ptatutksr applied
? Sig Robert Apstrnsber, who WAS nd es-
.psirs 9stiton sins thae parishs % assisvs;n
itti6g y stoysi the church; whiSK.bs
.id tlis dong regaioa lsuind VI ssfy Seold..
AUD 4 ail, & SRI esaata sis Robert i esslsimsd: 81
hse arm them With yaar q doctsins,s ssir.