The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1859-04-14
less to my room, and days elapsed ere |

home again. How proud and handsome
be looked as he rode up this morning and
dsmounted at our door [ shrunk back
that he might not see me. He had not
looked upon my face since that fearful
disease robbed me of ali my beauty, and
| dreaded his start of surprisc-his eff;
forts to hide all token of bis disappoint-
ment. But be was evidently prepared
! for the change. Jeanette has told him
ALL His manner was kind and friendly
in the extreme, quite brotherly, ID fact =
That is right; but it destroys the hope
that for three years | have been, almost
unknown to myself, building up. We
have not met before since that sad time
of my mothers death, when he was my
comforter and friend, and the girl Of if
I teen relied upon the lad Of nineteen as a
brother, though the feelings that then
sprung up in my breast were warmer far,
| fear, than those Of sisterly affection.
| had no right to hope that be would
care for NE now, and he does not. But
to-morrow his Others ball takes place,
and then shall learn how be regards me.
II be pays me marked attention, shall
know that be loves in spite of my plain
face.
Scptembcr Silt is over! Gerald
scarcely noticed NE after the first saluta-
tops we're PASSED. but devoted himself to
very beautiful girl, who, | learn, is Wis
itiDg Jeannette, the sister of one of his
college friends. He evidently loves her.
saw it; aud though later in the evenins 2
he asked NE to dance, and looked painful
when spoke of an engagement, and lin
gered beside me until NY partner came
to claim NE. yet | doubt not it was all
from pity, for had silent aud alone al
most the entire evening, and be felt that
some little attention was due me.
So felt sure; and afraid lest what /
felt should become APPARENT, smiled and
firted with Colonel Seatou, and made
myself so agreeable to him that | was not
surprised when, at the close of the dance,
be drew me away to the deserted music
room, on the pretence of finding cool air
there.
Colonel Seaton has long admired me,
in spite of my lost beauty, and | was not
totally unprepared for what followed-a
declaration of love, and an offer of bis
heart aud hand. ! have sealed my fate
and Gerald Mount rhall never shall never
say that I waited for him, to be Tilted by
loss OF beauty.
Erenlng Thus much had | written
when word was brought me that Colonel
Seaton awaited me in the drawing room.
| went to bin at once, not with too much
haste, nor with shy delay. | was calm
aud cool, be profuse iu his thanks for N y
coDdescension and bis expressions Of the
sense of honor conferred upon him. He
had been with NY father, obtained his
consent to our marriage, and the affair
is now definitely arranged. In month
we are to be married.
Yes, 10 month | shall stand before
the altar purjuress-fo for | do not love
the man to whom | shall there vow life
long affection and fidelity. Alas! is there
DO escape! Must | wear the yoke my
own hands have rivitedl And | might
have been so bappyl But now it is too
late!
Gerald loves me-bss loved me always,
and longed to be with me last evening bot
was forced to devote himself to his sis
ter's guest, an utter stranger to all pres
eut. Oh, miserable me! Wretcbed ex-
ceedingly that ms own lips have sealed
uy fate!
Scarcely had Colonel Seaton left me
when Gerald came. Flushed with hope
and love, be poured out his hearts secret,
and sinking at my feet told me all and
besougbt me to become bis wife. l sat
as if frozen to stone Not until be was
silent and waiting for my answer could |
summon voice to speak. Then, re-
membering the man whose promised wife
was, spoke the words that sealed my
fate. coldly, calmy, | believe, turning NJ y
pale face away, and driving back the
tears AID sbrieks that would have burst
forth. Then, with the same freezing
calmDess, | went from the room, and left
there toe only man | have ever loved,
bueelng beside the couch where | had
sat, With despairing gaze following me as
I | went. Five minutes later | heard a
horse galiop madly along the avenue. !
looked from the window my last upon
Gerald Mount! Happiness was offered
me too latel now | must prepare for du-
ty-tbst only remains to me!
/ January 20h, Is-. Twenty years
have passed since the fatal day that N ade
me the wife of Colonel Seston. AS | sit
here alone, widowed, orphaned aud child
less, deprived, in one short year. of all
upon whom | bad any claim of custom, OF
of love, memory goes back over the
wretchedness and sorrows of the Past.
remember the FIVE wretchcd years that
dragged their heightened chain while |
lived beneath the roof Of my husband
the separation that made US both only
less miserable than our continued resi-
denee together in mutual antagonisn
would have done I remember my faith.
ers proud anger at what he held to be
''my disgrace, the stern reproaches and
] commands bv which he stroye to com mel