davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
Illustration or Law.

A good story was rife in our city thi.
morning which serves to illustrate tha,
possession is nine points of law A is
a sharp lawyer, and resides next door ts
B. The house A and B occupy are simi-
lar in appearance, and as they adjoin are
easily mistaken by a comparative stran-
ger. B being out Of coal, walks to the
coal market, purchases a load for $3.50
and sends it home. The man of whom he
purchased mistakes the residence Of A for
that Of B, and dumps the coal in As yard
The lawyers man sees the coal in the
yard and gets wheel barrow and shovel
and puts it in the cellar. B is in a 'peck
Of trouble" that bis coal does not come,
and goes out to find the man of whom he
bought it.
"See here my country friend, bough.
load Of coal Of you, and you have not de-
livered it, says B, as soon as he had
Aouuu lle COillcT.
"You bought the load, and paid for it,
and ! delivered it, said the coal dealer.
Here the thought struck B that he had
seen coal in his neighbor's, the lawyers
yard, and he Immediately OWNED the mys.
terry.
He starts for the lawyers Office and find.
ing him in, thus accosts him:
"Mr suppose you should buy a load Of
coal and the man should put it in the
wrong yard, what would you require Of
the gentleman who appropriated the coal
DWELL sir! said the lawyer, 81 should
either make him return the coal or pay
the amount paid for the load"
Very we'll" said B Just give me S3,-
30 and you can retain my load of coal in
your cellar The lawyer gently drew
thirty cents from his pocket, and handed
it to b.
"What does that mean Mr. A, you owe
me three dollars more" said the astonish.
ed B. mot at all" said the lawyer. 81
charge hrec do!lars far my dotce.--Po-
ria Union.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
Dubuque, April 18th 1859.

nel. A neighbor of mine was fairly or
other wise, accused Of stealing sheep, and
the day was set when he was to answer
the charge before tho court Of justice. =
But, as il happened, before the day OF trial
be sckened aud died. His old mother
was overwhelmed with grief, and sat long
Ly the corpse, filling the house with la
mentations. At last u thought seemed
10 strike her, she frightened up, and, throw
Ing up her hands, she piously calculated :
"Well thank God. he's out u the SLeep
scrare, anyhow"
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

ED- More credit, more reputation, and
more respect can be thrown down in mo.
ment than can be built up in an age
Mark this young men, you who are form.
ing characters. Let every stone in the
structure be placed upon firm founda.
ton, remembering that il this precaution
be not taken, some may tumble down
which might seriously endanger the
entire structure. How very impor-
tant then to build well and strong at the
start.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
The Elastic Egg.

Take good and sound egg, place it in
strong vinegar, and allow it to remain
twelve hours it will then become soft and
elastic. In this state it can be squeezed
into q tolerable wide mouth bottle when
in, it must be covered with water having
some soda in it. In n few hours this pre-
paration will restore the egg nearly to its
original solidity, after which the LIQUID
shoul be poured of and the bottle dried.
Keep it as curiosity to puzzle your friends
for an explanation how tho egg was laid
in the bottle.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
; - = -
A Rich Scene.

In the Canadian House of Assembly
last week, they had quite spirited de.
bate on the bill to prohibit the use Of
hoops and crinoline introduced by Aiken
We publish few Of the most brilliant
passages.
Mr.. Drummond was an ardent admirer
Of hoops from childhoold. He was born
with love of hoops. When he was child
of tender growth, he used to trundle his
hoop. all unconcious Of the fate that
was in store for him. Later in life he had
swallowed ring, which resulted in hoop
in.cough, and even now the sight of an
empty hogshead brought tears in his eyes.
Mr.. Brown complained that it was i'm.
possible nov to choose wife, her defects
were so. hid by hoops, and enveloped in
crinoline, that the naked
Speaker-Order.
Mr.. Brown-Mr. Speaker
Speaker-1he honorable gentleman is
out of order.
Mr.. Brown-But, Mr.. Speaker, the max.
ed
Speaker-Hold your tongue, sir!
Mr.. Brown-1he naked
speaker-Upon my soul, Mr.. Brown :;
cork up, or III have you arrested.
Mr.. Brown-Permt me to explain, Mr..
Speaker. When l said naked
speaker-(yelling)-Clear the galleries
of ladies Mr.. Sergean mt.
Mr.. Brown-In the name of the seven.
teen graces and the fifteen muses., Mr..
speaker-dearly beloved Smith-let me
apologize, then. l only meant to say that
hoops and crinolne had reached to such
a rotuncity, that it was impossible to
arrive at the naked
speaker-(f -(frantically)-Death and blue
devils !! Stop, or III brain you with the
mace. Consider the improprety Of
Mr.. Brown wildly Truth truth
truth naked truth, was what was going
to say.
Mr.. Dunbar Ross understood his hon
able friend to say that people cannot pass
along the streets without being assaulted
by highwaymen. Now, surely the honor
able member from Lake Ontario could not
but be aware that the character of ev-
cry member in the House was effected by
such dam 49, .----.. -.-..-...-
nentary language.
Mr.. Ross protested against interruption.
lie was going to say, by such a dam
Mr.. j. Cameron--the honorable mem. |
Der should not swear in that dreadful man
1er.
Mr.. Ross-Wasnt doing anything of
he kind but would be tempted to do so,
f not allowed to finish his sentence-but |
such dam order, orderJ DAM tre
nendous uproar.)
Mr.. Wright stood up and moved, amidst
he widest confusion, that Mr.. Ross be ex
oelled from the House for such awful Ian
,uage.
Mr.. Ross BLACK in the face) exclaimed
hat damaging statements was all he meant
o say when he was interrupted by the
ool--
Mr.. Talbot-Who's fool
Mr.. Ross--Foolish ass
Mr. Cameron--Who'sa an ass?
Mr.. Ross -(wildly y)-foolish assertion of
profanity.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

cold ground, these locks frozen to the eartl
then again we saw him caught in the ne,
work Of the railroad on Clark street, ant
crushed to shapeless mass.
Slowly passed the hours. Will dayligh,
never come? 1t came at last. Ere w
began our search again, we went into the
breakfast room, and thers, lying upon the
sewing machine, was his little hat. We
turned from it, and in the corner stood the
rocking horse, with the reins drawn over
its head, just as he had left it; while on
the table was his plate. with his high chair
besides it. Up 10 that moment we main
tanned our 6rmness, out we could no lon
ger.
Friends came to assist us. God bless
them! Never did we need them more
never we appreciate them more highly
The authorities placed the police at our
service, to make the search thorough.
Still no tidings. Nearly eighteen hours
had passed, each hope had been crushed
and the prospect grew darker.
AT this juncture came German to the
house, and said that if our child was the
one described in the morning papers, he
was safe, and he would bring him. We
did not see him, and on learning the news
drove to the place we supposed be desgna.
ted but he found no child. Homeward
again he did not come. The friends in
search had in part returned, and were
waiting the result of this intelligence, ere
they should 60 again. The anxiety was
too deep for words. At last we saw some
one coming-nearer and nearer. It was
it was our child! God be praised he
was safe
Scared by the mothers emotions-mo-
theirs can imagine them
Our friends gathered with swimming
eyes about the child. There was no need
to call them to "come and rejoice with
u.s. They came unbidden. There were
three other children who had not been in
peril three who, had not wandered three
whom We loved as we loved the fourth but
y, there was in our hearts, there was
among our nei eighbors, more anxiety over
the one, than over the three that went not
estray !-More-aye, more We did not
love them less but the JOY was over the re.
scued
An honest German had found the little
saw that he was lost. He took him up and
carried him home, placed him in the crib
and rocked him to sleep; hadwashed and
fed him, and restored him to our arms. We
asked him to except a pecuniary recon
pense, but he refused, saying in broken
English, II have children, too; if one of
mine was lost, would want some one to
take him up. No, no-no money" and
lie buttoned his coat over his noble leu
tonic heart and bid US good bye.
Will our readers pardon this personal
detail Never before did we fully know
the import of that word su, pense. New
er did we so feel the terrible meaning
of the word lost Never did We SO
read the declaration of Joy in heav.
en- over the repenting. And never did
we so appreciate the kind attentions Of
friends, whom we thank from the depth Of
our nmost nature, and devoutly do we
pray that We may never have occasion to
assist them in similar trial.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
---==-=-~1 . S77777777-7-I777-7-
Introducing Himself.

1t was during the second Presidential
term of General Jackson, that he stopped
at public house, while on his way from
Nashville to Florence, Alabama; and
thereby hangs tale. He was the guest
of Mr.. Samuel Wormsley, as fine a speci-
men of an old Virginian as you will find
anywhere between the rising and the set.
ting of the sun. A large company were
present, and many were being introduced.
The hos: presented two of his sons.in. law
in the following manner:
General, allow me to introduce my
son-in.law, Samuel p. Walker, who is a
nephew Of James X. Polk. General, allow
me to introduce another son, law, Adley
@. Harris, once brother.in-law to James
X. Polk
In a corner of the room sat wag who
had eaten too much or drank too much :;
rising from his seat. he said
General, allow me to introduce myself.
Michael K. Moore. | married Kate, the
daughter of old John Miller give me your
corn-s,ealer !"
Well, there was laugh, long loud and
hearty, in which the old hero joined, while
Extending his "corn stealer."
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
THE LONG AGO.

THE following very beautiful poem has been attri
buted to B. =. Taylor, OF the Chicago Journal and
vsrivus others 1t was first published In the sche-
nsctady New Era, about three years since, and was
written by Ftx Hugh Ludlow, author of ''rhe Hash
sssh Eater" 1t Is one of the finest things We ever
read.J
Oh! wonderful stream Is the river of Time
Al II runs through the realms OF tears,
With . faultless rhythm and musical rhyme,
And boundlsss sweep and a surge sublime,
As Il blsnds with the Ocean Of Years.
How the winters drifting, like fakes Of snow,
And the summers, like buds between
And the year in the shsaE-so they and they 90
o. the Rivers breast, with its ebb and flow,
Al It glidss in the shadow and sheen.
There's magical Isle up the river of Time,
Whore the softsst Of airs playing;
There's cloadlsss sky and tropical cline,
And . soug as sweet vesper chime,
And the Junes with the roses are staying.
And the name Of that ISLE is the LoNo AGO,
And We bury treasur res there;
There are brows Of beauty and bosoms of
They are heapsd Of dust--but We loved them -
There are trinksts and trcsses Of hair
There arc fragments Of songs that nobody sings,
And part of an infants prayer;
There's . Lutte unswept, and harp without strings.
There are broken VOWS and pieces of rings,
And the garments that .he used to wear.
There are hands that are waved when the fairy shore
BY the Mirage is lifted In air;
And sometimes hear. through the turbulent roar
Sweet voices heard In the days gone before,
When the wind down the river Is fair.
Oh, rememberd for aye be the blessed Isle,
All the day Of our life till night
When the evening comes with its beautiful smile,
And our eyes closing to slumber awhile,
May that "Greenwo oodr of Soul be In sight!
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

rah- The Cincinnati papers are great on
Sensation items.' The latest in that line
is in the Enquirer of late date. 1t is
stated that during marriage in one Of the
churches crazy man entered and called
loudly for knife with which to sacrifice
himself upon the altar. The Enquirer
says that .'the bride and her friends were
frozen with horror AS the paper does
not state what became of the frozen par
ties, i il supposed tina. thcy are waiting
the spring thaw."
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

DI- The New Yrk Times says that
the news brought frvn the Old World bv
the Canada, is fraugt with evil tidings
for the American adocates of the African
slave trade. The onl.sovereign in all the
world who sympathizedwith their objects
and would have aetlvei furthered their
designs, is no more. Tn tomb of the At
rican Capulets has recei,d his Majesty
the King of Dahomey.
His Majesty the King. sor he was a
king, though his skin was hck and his
hair woody. A monarch VIII bu. lately
made treaty with the Empera of France,
a sovereign with whom an EtGsh gov
eminent had quarrelled, and those ar
chi7es, if he preserved any, coul exhibit
negotiations with the Crown Of Artugal.
lie was remarkable as having bet a te.
rocious brute, if an expression sostrons
may be applied to parsonage so aal.ed
and for having maintained body sard
of female warriors,-a troop of Amtn-
ian Ebony. And when he died the II g
dom Of Dahomey showed the sineeritSf
its afiliction by sacrificing, with the my
unniggardly sacrifice, eight hundred nil
gers to his honored name.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

nsn- Once upon time, an lrlshman
aud negro were fighting, aud while crap.
pling with each other, the Irishman ex-
claimed, You diyil ofa black nagur, cry
enough I'll fight till die!" "Soll |,
boss, sung out the darkey. Il always
does"
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

Albeit we record, now and then a Joke,
We are not conyersant with the work of
Mr. Joseph Miller and therefore, cannot
say positively, bu. the following. or sone-
thing very much resembling it. may have
been related by him. 1t was however. told
of distinguished lawyer of Massachusetts,
who. but a few vaars $40 ~"eh h.l.e. g.
certain cause at Roxbury, wherein he be-
lieyed the jury had done injustice to his
client Declaiming against the verdict he
said: The whole Of them might bs
bribei for a peck Of beans"
What is that ?" said the Judge. "You
dishonor Yourself and the court, as well as
the jury, by such an impeachment"
Il mean no disrespect to the court your
honor and as for myself
You will see the rroprie,y, hope, Of
retractng the Words
with all due Difference to your honor
| cannot see the propriety Of unsaying
what is true
"Do you intend to aggravate the offence
by repeating it :? Let me tell you, Sir,
this is not to be suffered. and unless you
retract forthwith we shall deem i, necess>
ary to strike you from the rolls of tho
court"
"Well, since the court insists upon it, l
suppose | can do no less than re.ract.'
And in very ample terms, too"
Certainly, your honor, and, on second
thought do it with great pleasure. l am
convinced, now, tina, ! wronged the jury
in saying they could be bribed for a peek
OF beans, and thus openly and publicly,
retract the assertion. | hope the court
and jury are satisfied"
They expressed themselves in the affirm.
ative, and the lawyer rejoinsd: "But may
it please the court and the jury, had said
half q mShd instead of q peek, | would
have been hanged sooner than retracted."
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

La" Ex-senator o. II. Smila, who re.
Gently died in Indiana, was elected to Con
gress in 1896. lie rode on horseback To
Washington to take his seat, which jour
ney occupied seventeen days.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

MS. A city buck visited the Shakers at
Lebanon some time ago, and as he was
wandering through the village encountered
a stout, hearty specimen Of the sect, and
thus addressed him:
well Broadtrim, are you much Of
Shaker ?''
may" said the other, "not overmuch,
but can do little that way
Il should like to see you perform
II can accommodate thee, friend said
the other, quite cool, aud seized the aston
ished customer by the collar and nearly
shook him out Of his boots.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

D-lS~ Byron was disenchantcd when he
saw his inamorata eating. lu other words
he ialtered when youth and beauty were
at steak.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12
Rumored Insurrection In Cuba.

The sudden disappearance from the ci
ty of New York, within three or four week
past, Of sundry Cuban exiles has been re
marked by many. The New York Sun
which is the peculiar organ of Cuban pat.
riotism, gives the following startling ex-
PLANTATION, which nny be- characterize ed
important if true"
The Flag Of Free Cuba.-We display
once more in our colums the emblem o.
Cuban lioerty-the emblem under whic b
her patriot sons are, perhaps, at this mo.
ment startling the ears Of their oppressors
with the cry which ran through the thir.
teen colonies, in the glorious days of our
Revolution-"Glre us Liberty or gire us
DEATH"
We seek to raise no idle excitement.
We have good reason for the belief that, il
the flame Of revolt has not already been
kindled in the Island Of Cuba, it will be be.
fore the end Of this week. The Cubans
have by many bitter disappointment, re.
allied the truth of the Poets lines, that
"Who would be free
The mselves must strike the blow
Therefore, ever since their abandonment
by Quitman and others, their betrayal by
professed friends in the United States, and
the squandering of the resources of revol-
ution which they had collected they have
devoted themselves to new plan in which
the initiative and the first efforts for free.
dom should be exclusively Cuban. Up.
on this basis they have organized Patriot
Clubs throughout the Island, and the mem.
bers couat by thousands. Their co-patri-
OTIS in the United States have aided all
their plans, and will share with them in
the dangers and the glory Of the struggle
for Cuban rights.
All the stories set ahoat about the Or
ganzation of American expeditions are
wide OF the truth. This last i S pure Gu
ban movement. The first of this month
was the time fixed by the Clubs through
out the Island for general rising, and.
unless their plot has been discovered. or
some untoward event has happened, they
are now IN arms against their oppressors.
The New York Convention of Cuban
patrlots--a small but determined band
sailed on their dangerous mission in the
latter part of March. Ifthe patriots in the
fixed, the landing .. the New York Con.
vention would be the signal for revolt
Arms and ammunition have been provid
ed, and all are bound by solemn obliga.
ton TO stand by the cause, until victory
crowns their efforts, or the man has fall
en-. Most Of the Cubans who have gone
from New York are young men; many of
them sons of the leading men of the
Island, and all fired with the determiua-
ton to free their hative soil, or die in the
attempt. They 60 forth taking their lives
in their hands.
The Cubans will now prove the sinceri-
ty of the loud.spoken American sympa,
thizers. viii our government see to it
that they have faii play? Will Mr.. Buch
anan stand up tohis pledges and profess
ed policy? WillSenator Brown and Tam. |
many Hall back heir brave words by deeds
of practical sypmrhy? Thenext steamer
from Havana may bring US string news ;
in the mean time,let those who have talk
ed Cuba prepare to do something to
strengthen the hams Of her patriot sons.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

Eky" Some time age !, re lived in old
ermont queer old .aa., named Fuller.
! had lost part OF his palate, and was
aare specimen. lie owned a mill, the
wy to which was brought for some dis
TAN through n wooden hume. One
moi 'ng an apprentice informed him that
'he sme was full of suckers. Fuller
pos'e himself at its mouth, placing n
large Aket TO catch the suckers in, while
the hoS ent to the other end to hoist the
gate. iere was q rushing of many wa.
ters, Ming Fuller, basket and all, over
the oSefst wheel, and thirty fee, below.
All df.pp he scrambled out, sput,ering,
You maynk I'm an old idiot, but
nam lniu,eh darued TOOL that ean't
see througta, Joker
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

Down EAST INpIANs.-The editor Of the
Portland Transcript has been on tour.
with other Maine editors. to the Aristook
region. The following brief conversation
with one OF the aborigines, would seem to
prove that the Indians of that region arc
making great advances in civilization:
"You Englishmen
"No.'
"You Commissioners -
"No-we are editors"
ugh make newspapers! Learned
men. great minds Much lie! Ugh +"
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

rsA- An lrishman complained Of his
physcian tina, he stuffed him SO much with
drugs tina, he was sick after he got well.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

HrsN The more man works, the less
time he will have to grumble about hard
times
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

Ca A country editor, speaking OF
steamboat, SAYS, "she has twelve berlhs
in her ladies cabin
.oh life Of me- exclaimed an old lady,
reading the above, what squalling there
mus, have been"
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

esay-rhe apportionment Of school money
in the State Of Iowa this year, amounts to
one dollar and seven cents scholar.
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

I'u In Nonsin they call bribe a
"pecaniary 4,liment,' aud deialca.
ton in . pub officer an "oliieial con.
ycyanes."
Sioux City register. [volume] (Sioux City, Iowa) 1858-1871, 1859-05-12

r.a- California has $500 600 in hsr
Treasury.
Nevada national., 1859-04-02
To the Afflicted. .

h#. J.. : On Kay teiru. Dis -iurcre tinui. Co.
- Die nlWer"H- patient. i.t ti...- itf.ata..e tl'
would taAe '.ifui 't' UNITY io rr.iiu. 'aria t't go
continue. fr e.n.t go hi. lr-tii .r ftr fI, .. rr
ot go i"rm- 90 Private Il.ri..---lch 4. ,rhii-.
t"n"fri u.a N"r uri-al laui..ita auI aiI tit con
sriiurfHr- of .'i tai-s o. fi- -f -'Hea. nf -tpifi
tir or 1ou"fi"sli l es.,-. i" rutsG i. % rf ~ in o.
i'U DAYS. WtffHf lns.. ffs fat UHf f.r
hiIiirlrce 'u ti- hu-Iu.-. NH,Htt patient o., i-.
lr.t ut iuVri'r tf..turn- Na ..,.iott.I q. -..,.f
diary ~tmut' H- ui SYPHILIS .t-h t- tl.i,- uf taif.
tul sW"i,n-~ 81. the rr"tu- airrf. in Poe ti..tt
aIl n,-c. h % mot ci-rl go Co., the rart.
sud cause the bone, 10 ulurily .eIaratc auI r.an.
AMY Having H., .u''reI au object h.itu,l. g. 90.
L"li 'r ben hioichr- ami I.ri les bt,aL oi.t ut,.
The ,lin. .r frn ir hf- painful dwellings upon 'l,
lour- ur wH,u . H"n-ii+ ii+HIiHa BE- iu,Ufe.. .. a fD
o." dispose 90 rru-aff ..nu Iti .ir i-fii f., 20
disease tae Doctor glli-lic's cuIe ora.k, ut ii.
l.+Uslt.lI.
Do Ea~Iwtii-m chronic or ac..tc.ir i,veout.gr,. o..
i1auln.i. hr aa- -... ..... -.ua' L,I..tfi.- ln-
thc treatment '. fle r"n--i .f.. @. sell abu-e us.
a- nocturnal etii.- t- u.-s .n.-- iiu.iIif. u.,i
ache Iair- Boz f'r hsc. afl i.nl. ,iiIl -.ucfsl ss
ur. '-- ot ie'i'e --a ai memory injury % tl.,
sight re-il"--n,.- confusion uf it.a. di-iLs 't .
cety. anl 'ealu- .f a.afr,.- ai l,s..it.. tI. n,i
you- -rs'rm so -N'. '1hi, tiHt % tlt O., .-.. M cf
statil' t.r patient iHfh-i- Dol. .N-i"btr N-.r.f
FOR 'l, at owe tua,uii~- ti. l.r. ufI .-s.r.r . .
cul. or a-t n0 c"nprn-atton l.- cam uc col..l .lt,.
tree ri charge ar u. POS al t0 ca o. a- 81 uIi cost
urn nothing. tn' mt. he much to their 70 i,sutaLr
Ii- Office O.. goo Sarrautlif. street.. it.8r Nuuf
gom.rv opposite tLe Pacific A..Il steamship Gonna,
uy ohce uihcr Log4- 'l,al q q. II 10 50 j.. 81.