Richmond daily Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1842-1861, 1859-10-05
foR rug Vino.
UNKIND But COMPLETE DESTRUCTION OF JOHN

bites at a cherry.
second offender the author of Light and Darkness"
seems since the appearance of terrible article of
last year. TO have preferred Darkness" Light"
indeed from the Biblical reason but from pure and lust
y founded fear of myself She also is safe-so long
she remains In the state OF adambraon which have
consigned her hut no longer.
| The Albemare offender has not been heard FROM
How admirable quality is discretion Especially So when
1t follows as the direct result OF clear appreciation
profound critical ability.
The person who guilty of the indscretion Il will
call them by no fercer name,l of Edith Allen and
Lilias, must have been painfully affected by INV as
siult. small paper informs that he conemplates
the publication OF Literary Magazine in the town of
fsrmvlcl To this extremity OF Distraction bad
intended TO drive him. In view of the possibility of
performance really rash have only TO say that the
moment it is carried into execution shall abolish the
Southern Literary Messenger. will not permit two
magazines to exist in the State. Need add that do
not consider the nnocuous pamphlets printed by the lads
of the University, and the urchns of Hampden Sidney
| College, magazinesy No, need not.
filth offender, failed 10 notice in my tremendous
general onslaught refer to the perpcrator Of Hors
ford, Tale of Bacon and Green's something to that
effect 1t is little remarkable that the culpr, in this
ease did not avail himself of the opportunity afforded by
my absence OF mind, rather Ignorance of his mis-
decd TO perpctrate second preparation. As a reward
for his timidy' shall drop him at this point without
even admonition.
There is still another criminal criminal not in fact
but IN intention The secret literary police which have
established throughout the State have brought my
ears the unpleasng intelligence of the existence in Mss
of novel, entitled :" Proud Hearts have but n
word to to the ruan this case say TO him Be.
| iNfTe
como to the profuse and abandoned novel.
ist of them all, to wit, bingham Cooke author of the
Virginia Comedians" the " Lash of the Teamsters"
the " SIX Socks, the " inhuman Tragedy" the Tooth
OF Jehcrs Son. :" Green Coat. or the Bloody Grin
and the Devil knows what ALL Il will be perfectly re.
membered that at the close of nv remorsecSs article of
last year. stated that another book by Mr. Cooke was
announced as forthcoming by the arpers and intma,ed
my Intention OF consuming IL by critical mastication the
moment u appeared 10 did not appear for a twelve
month To attribute this delay to flight on the mart of
the publishers and author is unnecessary The case is
too plain. No book could by possibility be issued
IN the face OF so fearful annuuciation as mine
The writer and the printers wisely waited for wear TO
roll around thinking by that time my threat would be
forgotten Alas they ltle knew me. During the
month just past the book, long announced and expec
tel was published and silly placed upon the counters of
all the booksellers in the United States the Canadas and
elsewhere. The OF this book is q Henrv St John
Gentleman OF Flower Of Hundreds in the county of
Prince George. Virginia"
have examined this performance as carefully as lad
cold would permit, and in justice to the poor man who
d A. am constrained to pronounce perhaps the most
excusable OF all his misdemeanors The thing will tell
and, fear, tell largely. There is girl in it who will
take all the boys, and Young who will take all the
girls The pretty pictures OF the colonial times will please
the Old folks And so the thing will take all around.
Well let IT take The unfortunate writer will need all
he will make out of it 10 pay funeral expenses am
! about to demoish him. shall do so by preferring
against him two charges both entirely true and of so
grave nature that man, and particularly no novelist
can live under the weight of them.
Charge l-Mr Cookies ewes are in the back of
his head Now, am aware that the location of a mans
eyes Is not matter of choice with him. | would il
were for, il were should for best known to
myself wear one eye exactly in the end Of my nose and
the other in my left panaloons pocket But the fact
that Mr. Cooke had no hand in putting his ewes in the
back OF his head does make the any better for
him Nay, rather worse. The defect is organc-hopc-
less of cure.
the Yesterdays OF Yesterday. The quick living hopeful
Promiseul to-day he will not, for he cannot look at
lie stands full front 10 the mighty future much might
Ter ana more glorious than the past life is mghticr
and more glorious than DEATH and beholds nothing The
august possibilities, the sublime ccriausies of the coming
time the wonder of the splendid Present have charm
Tor him. His eyes fixed upon the Past the Past of
that Virginia he loves we'll The danes, the damses
the gaant the squTcs their manners aud customs the
homes, the bome-habts and home lmusomcnts-indeed
everything appertaning to the preevOutiOnary period
IN Virginia, have fascinated hm The great men Of that
day are TO him the greatest of men, Their like was
never before, and shall be again. The revolution
the ~ou''n Of that time, young OF DID, exceed all
men, living or 10 come.
Very good. This NAV all be so and don't saw !, /;
not So But go in for to-day, and tomorrow and so
on What Mr. Longellow calls 1.-THE living Present. is
ts 'lhs Tor me Tue respectable gentlemen and ladies
| who were buried down at Williamsburg about eighty
years ago, were doubt not very nice people but they
are too dead for my taste. a fellow that can 20
round TO Guyers with TO get glass of lager or some
thing stronger, if lac prefers (which he ought not
want young woman still in the aesh Grace or Broad
street, that can TO Of night and talk to- These
!
more than all the dead people that ever lived don't
care il they did knec-breeches and fight in The
! Revolution " '''
It may be said and may be IT ought to be s,d that
lie who faithfully portays glorious past does much TO
enob!e the present Granted. Bat Eliincham Cooke
IA. ehooed the present rather repeatedly. I'm afraid
he make II too noble Ia fact I'm tired of hearing my
Ae'stors ever bad any, which il is doubtful crack
ed up IS The op-most tOpsawyers of creation There
j. danger lest, instead OF being stimulated shall be
overwhelmed by the contemplation of the il,pstri,s
nTfD rrnus p.nfffr
| OF my graad-daddy provided had ouc,-wIich re-
Pe" IS douottu proud of bis day and the deeds Of
s generation; but don't want to get 20 plague.taked
Fou 81 INN, and his ;Imcs TO undarvalue myself and
my times. The old times may have been mighty good
hlt there some first days and prime donrs left
Therefore desire that bingham Cooke shall sell out
s oid stock close business in the Behind and set NJ
/ shop IN the Nov. But forget that am ut this very
moment IN tie act Of demO'isIing him When I am
done with him, there viii not be lett enough OF him to
Charge IT, ST. Coolies eyes are no. only in the hack oC
lis head, but they also afflicted with pair Of rose
| coored goggles Of enormous maenying power For
tins latter bh-my, hold him more responsible than
\ Tor the former. II il natuFe's dong-th,t beuigu Ma
ture uct me spell 10 with Big ''N'J which intended him
Tor something just this side OF poet aud Just the other
side Of Notwithstanding in fine peculiarly adan,.J
for demoshment at The hands Of my bloody and seriy
/ orous eli
It's bal enough only those things, which are be-
hind hodys back but Orcc them all rafsur ID roe why
not say "rose-eolor' a. Ia Ike to know ~ and n,
twice az large nay forty times large rs life and CIV
twe' a. beautiful, j. too bad altogether IL is incycusa
Die, objectionable, not easily forgiyabe wrong inprop
or, and perhaps, q i;le out Of the way.
To Illustrate:
Does W. Cooke behold young female behind his
bAck, mind sou, but right in front Of his eyesJ Do.
he, say, behold young fcmaloy II hc does Won NAV
be sure u the first place. that she hl been dead at s
sixty ychr,-irOm that 10 a hundred or a hundred and
my. In the next place. The longer she has been dead
the more b" enjoys h"r the wildly aud radiautIy
aud ravishingly, and rapturouly he paints her I'd.
clare upon my honor that If he we're 10 get after Young
female who had been IN the grave almost thousand
years and attempt 70 describe her. he would co insiop
w. aud immediately and irrcvocably mad But the f.
10" does contryc 10 work up the old young female dust
IN the most captivating j. she prctty-I mean
Oookes dead old young lemalog She IL tlat-p-odig
ou.y pretty is she delightful merry Jolly mi Of frr
nnd fun, coqucitish yet true skittsh yet thorougred
and all tlatf She is.--yOud better believe she IT,
Aud 80 With Cookies old females end Old males and
\ young males. They have all been dead a long. lone
time, and they come 10 fife under much more favorable
circumstances than they enjoyed previous 10 their
/ resurrection II trust 10 Bingham Cookies rcd
goggles The Virginia Of oicn times was a aort Of drops
cal garden Of Eden infested by some thousands Of bloa
ell Adams and Evcsihat is 20 say the garden was drop-
steal With delights and the Adams and Eves io,ted win
hics thank The Lord that We who tread the noe Too
clean streets Of Richmond and have great deal of tro
hl' n Keeping in debt and Of the Pcncniiarv did
not live IN those DAYS. We should have elt very oucb
feel when get into good communicable &. g. -