The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1859-01-15
WHOLE No. Gil
Gun,crous.
My Cruelty TO my RclatiNes.

ilSt tllIlc since my marriage. ana don't know
what evil gcnicus romp;ed the wickedness
Il acknowledge with tears in my eyes that it
was such) which Lerpetratcd towards my
wife and my ancient relative.
" My dear, said | to my wife, on the day
before my aunts arrival, yon know aunt
Mary is coming to morrow well, forgot to
mention rather annoying circumstance
with regard to her. She's very deaf: and
although she can hear my voice, to which she
is accustomed in its ordinary tones, yet YOU
will be obliged to speak extremely loud in
order to be heard. 1t will he rather inconyc-
nielt. but know you will do everything in
your lower to make her stay agreca ble."
Mrs. 5. announced her determination 10
make herself heard if possible
then went to John Thomas, who loves a
joke about as well as any person know Of.
told him to be at my house at six p. NJ, on
the following evening, ard felt comparatively
happy.
went to the railroad station, with car.
riaGe next evening, and when was on my
way home with my aunt. | said, My dear
aunt, there is one rather annoying infrmity
that Amelia has, which forgot to mention
before She's very deaf; and although she
can hear my voice, to which she is accustom-
ed. in its ordinary tones, yet you will he
obliged to speak extremely loud in order to
be heard. N sorry for it,"
Aunt Mary, in the goodness Of her heart,
protested that she rather liked speaking loud
and to do so would alord her great pleasure.
The carriage drove upon the steps was
WHEAT the window was John Thomas,
with face as utterly solemn as if he had
buried all his relatives that afternoon.
handed out my aunt-shc assembled tho
steps.
- am delighted to see YOU s'rckcd my
wife, and the policeman on the opposite side
OF the street started, and ny aunt nearly fell
down the steps.
kiss me, my dear" howled my aunt:
and the hall lamp CATERED and the windows
shock as with the fever and aguc | locked
at the window-John had disappeared. -
poked my head into the carriage, aid went
into strong commissions.
When | entered the rarlor, my wife was
helping aunt Mary to take of her bonnet and
cape; and there sat john with lis face Of
| woe.
suddenly, odd you have pleasant Jour-
ney . went of my wife like pistol, aud
John Thomas rather jumped TO his feet.
"Rather dusty, " was the RESPONSE, in q
war-whoop, and so tie conversation con-
tnued.
The ncishbors for Streets around must
have heard it; when | VAS in the ll.iid
story OF The building heard every word
plainly.
In the course of the evening. my aunt took
| occasion to say to me, " How loud your wife
81 elks Don't it hurt her "
told her all deaf persons talked loudly,
and that my wife, being used TO it, was not
| Affected by the cXeltion, and that aunt Mary
was getting along very nicely with her.
Presently my wife said, softly, All, how
very loud your aunt talks
Yes, said " all deaf persons do
You're getting along with her finely she
hears every word you Say" And rather
think she did
Elated at their success at being understood,
they went at it hammer and tongues, till
everything on the mantcl- piece clattcrptl
again. and | was seriously afraid of crowd
collecting in front Of the house.
But the end was near. My aunt, being of
an investigating turn Of mind, was dcsirous
OF finding out whether the eXcrton oftulkng
so loud was not injurious to my wife. So
said she, in ali uncaltlly boot for her voice
was not as musical as it was when she was
young, 6 Doesn' talking so LOUD strain your
lungs z"
=" It is an oxcrt1on. sh,ickcd my wife.
Then why do you do ii Z" was the an
swerng scream.
| BECAUSE, because, you can't hear II L
don - squcaled my wife.
What said my aunt, fairly rivalng
railroad whistle this time
began to think it time to evacuatc the
premises; and looking roand and seeing John
gone, stepped into the back parlor, and
there he lay flat on bis back, with his feet at
Alright angle with his body. rolling from side
to side, with his fists poked into lis ribs,
and most agonised expression Of counte-
nance, but not uttcring sound. ] imncdi.
atcly and unfortunately assumed a similar at
utude, and think that, from the relative
position of our boots and heads, and our at
tempts to restrain our laughter, aI,oplexy
must have inevitably eusucd, ifa horrible
eroan, which John gave vent TO in his en-
deavor TO IepfcsS his visibility, lad not be-
uaytd our h!ding-pla
In rushed my wife ard my aunt who by
this time comrrchendld the joke, and such
sstoldins as got then Lever got before, and
hope never to get again
know not what the end would have been.
If john in his endravors to appear respectful
and sympathetic, had not given vent to such
a dlaboiical noise, something between q
Groan and horse laugh, that all gravity was
upset, and We screamed i'll Conctr!.-PutaGm,
|