The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1859-07-20
Select @ ale.
A Brick-bat Duel.

One morning l was summoned to
town, to attend to some business which
detained me there for several days.
Whilst busily engaged in writing one
evening 1 was interrupted 10y the sudden
entrance of an old gent who generally
went by the name of Uncle Jim.
With spirit wide awake to any sort
of fun, as he expressed it, and opposed TO
all lawing. he had come to request me
"Ef ar'y of his two boys, Billy and Jack,
cum to me fur ar'y advice about suing
each other, to not have anything to do
with it, and to persuade them to drap the
thing whar it war;
told him would advise them not to
have anything to do with myself or any
other lawyer, and if l could prevent them,
he might depend upon it that would
But set down, Uncle Jim. and let me know
what has disturbed the harmony of their
intercourse.
"Harmony be dirncd, says Uncle Jim;
'there never was ar'y bit Nv harmony a.
tween EN-, and thar's a heap less now
However, es laughed at 'em you mout
as we'll know about it, And he proceed.
ed to inform me that having job of ket-
| tie setting. (setting sugar kettles in bricks)
he had started out with his two apprenti-
ces for the plantation where they were to
work. 1t was a bright clear morning,
as the three drove out of town in Uncle
Jim's neat one-horse wagon; but the boys
were so enraged at each other that Uncle
Jim expressed in, "sich another cussin as
they KEEP up never hearn in all my life.
1t appeared that Billy had placed de-
funct chicken, who had departed this life
some days previous, between the mattress
ses of Jacks bed. preventing his olfacto.
ries, as Jack said, from refreshing them
selves with as sound nap as other mem.
bers Of his body, and keeping him awake
hunting and cussing the cause of the un.
pleasant smell that prevailed his apart.
ment. $685. @ t.
, In his turn he had rewarded Billy's
assid1ous attention to his comfort, by
dosing his morning stiff 'ner with linseed
t oil, which caused such pleasing sensa.
ton in his'innards' that he Immediately
gazed at his .breckfst' as it noisily GOV
t cred Uncle Jim's coat and pants, thereby
5 causing that respectable old gent to make
some remarks not usually found in tn,
Douay version.
Well as they say in 'Massasip,' Jacl
cussed Billy until Uncle Jim could stanl
it no longer, and breaking forth he shout
ed: -l
"Boys, you've worked with me more'l
three year, and during that time I'v'
hearn more cussin,' more qusrlin' an NOR
and seed less tighten than 1 ever deemed
!, two varmints could be guilty of. Now
its got to stop, and eff hear one wore
more you got to fight it out when we ge
to the Colonel's.'
OF course this only added fuel to fam
and although they had exhausted nearl,
all of the cussin' vocabulary before the,
had reached the Colonel's, still they wer
J. in splendid hunor for free fight, whe,
they reached the plantation. As the,
: drove up the old Colonel observed tina
j something was wrong. and being mad
J, acquainted with the cause, proposed gen
eral shake hands all around. But no
their blood was up, aud Jim swore tina
fight they must, and that right off too, a
he wanted no more cussin' and wranglin'
= But here difficulty intervened. Tht
Colonel was opposed to fist fighting, ant
as for dueling, Billy would fight will
: nothing but small swords and Jack want
ed muskets, trigger to trigger and foot tt
foot,