Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1859-04-09
Sharp Paragraphs-bY Dow. .1r.

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Sharp Paragraphs-by Dow, Jr.
oN AsrRoloGr.- My heayers, whnt il nm
Astrnicgcr but mere mortal, after all? He
can no more burst open the iron-bnileL doors
of the future, than Il Uft-shcllcd niyrer can
butt his head through neither m;Il-stnnc.-
lie may feel the pulses of the stars to find
out the why and the wherefore of CONS
cholera, ear-ache, toutl.achc, dyspepsia. and
the spruc he may tell how city lots and tho
lots ofmdividuals will turn out : he may pre-
/ tend to all this; bnt he knows no more about
+ ii tmn pewter dog. There is just as much
Dependence to be placed upon his predictions
L rs there is upon the signs of 4 coming storm
when an old ram stands with his tail to tho
northeast. Study yourselves, my hearers:
pcruSc carefully YOUR hearts. aud thcr in
| clinations; and let all AStrologers pass to
Sprng-fodder in other words, gp to grass
SLEEP To THE GuIITy. The man who back
bites his neighbor; whoa acts dishonesty, lives
imnnrnly, anu votes sputiouSty: who loun-
Scs lozily, Judges rashlv. and condemns In
the 'cpntrlbutiun-box, and takes out a three.
cent piece to buy more ; such sinner can
not coax Sleep to his bedside. She wont do
1t; hc may fall into Snooae; he may partak6
oi the first section ofa 'cap-nap: but ere lie
is aware, Il skeleton Nightmare looks in at
the window, and gives horse.laugh Mt his
misery
SLEEP TO THE INNocEXT.--On~ the other
hand my hearers, look at the man WHO goes
10 hcd witha sense of having done his duty
to hrs Maker, his nciShbor. and himself Iio
falls calmly aslccp'in the arms of S minus,
who beckuns his friend Morpheus. while Rca-
son SIumbcrs, to come and guide his wan
,dcnng Hangover the blisslulfNord of dreams
Is no nbuSlncss man the banks pay specie,
and discount frculy ishc, a lawyer$ his eli
ents are all wealthy and full Uf suits :: is lie
a preacher like myself? his shcepNield good
heeceS, and are content with such fodder MS
they get. Oh! my hearers, il is.a blessed
thing to lie down at night with u light stem-
acli ANA conscience! You ought to sec me
sleep sometimes. fourteen mile n our. and
surroundm' oliecks rendered invisible by
the extreme velocity with which Snoozc.''
TuE Discomfort orIIUMANIry.-N NV
hearers, is the iretfu babe of trouble and
care. He often frsts because he can't lind
anything to fret about. You give him his
own way, and he d"..'tlike it: hc wants his
own way OF having his own way. know
the world: nobody has looked sharner than
i have, for a chance of honest happiness in
1T but the bubbles that rise on the stream
OF Tune arc altogether vanity. I've, been
down the stream, and Pvc watched the blub-r
blcrs: and tell you, my hearers. that all.
along by the margin of said stream, nests of
young llunbugs are continually being hatch
cd. 'i
Ok Love - L0ve, like electricity, pervados
all bodies. My heart sinks into my growers
pocket, when | mediate upon the evil which
1t has caused. 1t comes before you know it,
and makes yop feel queer Look at Won
miserable self.martyr, with the fire of LIQUID
damnution cleaning through his carbunaclc
nose: the pangso of despised love pour thro',
every pore Oflis ru'y probnscis. What con
stitutes tho staple of his hard reflections !?
tears, kisses, purtinss--saw-dust soft. saw
der, and soft-sOapi t.
1itE. House OF TnE HUMAN BoDY--I likcn
the Human Budyto a House. Thebig. g.honcs
are the main timbcrs. The ribs are nths,
well plastcred-or rather raftefs that run
INTO the ridge-polc, or backbone The mouth
Is tire door, and the nose isthc chimney
especially for smokers. Tic throat is the
cntrv, that lcadsto the kitchen of the stom.
ach, where all sorts of food are cooked. Tho
lungs src the bellows, that blow the flame
OF life, and keep the pot of existence always
boiling but the Heart is the great chamber,
where a great variety of goods are stored ;
some good; more middling: many bad NV
hearers if you have any rubbish in that
chamber, clear it out, and make room for
goods which are salcable in the markets of
the Vntuous. The chambers or some hearts
present an awful dirty Appearance Take
the bran.new broom of Decision. brush ont
the dirt of Sin, aud sand the floor with Yir.
tue. .,,ss-
UPON EGoTIsM AND DANpIEs.-I defest
eegotism and vanity as q cat does wet floor
Ihere are some vain persons in this world,
who after q long Incubation. will hatch out
from the hotbcd of Pride a sickly brood of
tnzzy ideas, and then go strutting along in
the path Of oi'PGmposity, with all tic seli?i,n.
portance of a specklcd hen, with black
chicken have an antipathy to such peo-
pie.
MURDgRERs TO DE E1EccTED. -Isaac Free
land, has been sentenced to be hung in Fay
cite county, Georgia, on the 18th of April
for the murder of Mr.. Claiborne Vaughan.
Mrs. llarung, for the murder of iicr h,rs-
band, and John Wilson. for killing Patrick
McCarty, have been sentenced to be hung in
ss.;s'y, en- "Wednesday, the .27sh of April.
iionfy jgmpcrtz, the man who murdered
ms mistress, and packed the body in nbarrci
/ and Slipped 1t to New York Michacl McNa.
NEE, for killing, his wife aud Michael Fapn
%,ll'be executed in Chicago, on Friday, the
9th Of May.
Burns, for the murder Of man named
Burke, will bc hung in Cincinnati on FRIDAY
the 27th-o Of May.
Besides the above. there are two in Pitts.
burg. under sentence of. death, one i'm BIS
! ton, and,fur In Baltimore.
y ~. - <.--------- ~.
Nm editor says that whenh he was in prison
tor AbelIing justice of the peace, he was re-.