The Kenosha telegraph and tribune. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1859-1860, 1859-09-01
Es IA Il ITE ES.

|
THIMBLEFUI. of powder will split rocl
four feet square.
CAcKLING may be termed POLITICALLY, tn,
Lay of the Hem
We owe it to our enemies to forgive we ow,
it to ourselves not to forget.
He that makes himself the common lester O
company, has just wit enough to be fool
WHAT tree represents person who persist.
in mourning debt Ans.-Willow (will owe. :,
WE suppose that man who never speaks
may be said always to keep his word.
CREDITORS and poor relations never call al
the right moment.
The blaze of reputation cannot be blown out
but it often dies in the socket
The whaling" season youth.
The man who was always splitting with
laughter, has been recommended to try an axe,
WHO were che first astrologers The stars
because they first studded the heavens.
OUR Country-Our country right or wrong
when right, to be kept right-when wrong to be
put right.
HUSBAND, must have some change to.
day" We'll, stay at home and take care of the
children ; that viii be change enough, anyhow.
A DESERTED damsel struck her lover with a
poker, exclaiming with sobs, "You have broken
my heart and I'll break your head, SIR"
II MEAN to abandon my habits of life,.' SAID
dlssipated gentleman. Are you sure, sir,
they are not abandoned enough already" asked
his friend.
The young lady who was SO delicate as to
have her strawberries pared declares that she
will never marry without a stipulation that her
husband shall live at least one block away from
! her.
BURGLAR was once frightened out of his
scheme OF robbery by the sweet simplicity of q
solitary spinster, Hho putting her night-caped
head out of the window, exclaimed. 4" Go away
arnt you ashamed :"
ToMKIS when called upon to hand in to the
Income Tax Commissioner his list, wrote this
admirably clear statements
"One old house all out of repair
| ns ~o nogs two sheep, and poor old mare;
Ihus you have my honest list
| Fray don't let the toll exceed the grist"
BREvITY IN CoRREsPoNDENCE-Th is {
story told OF gallant, who wrote TO noted
General the following brief epistle:
9. IT.
me. ian have herr Yours,
PATTERSON"
To which the General replied:
Go ahead Yours, SIMPSON"
A FEW days since, a +" wee bit of bow as
tonished his mother. She had occasion to chas
tise him slightly for some offence he had com
United. Charley sat very quietly in his chat
for some time afterwards, no doubt thinkin.
very profoundly At last he spoke out thus
Muzzer, l wish pad gel anozzer housekeeper
I've got tired seem you around!'
PAPERS OF NO UsE.-The following letter ID
said to have been written to the Rural New
! Yorker:
"mister Editur have somethin to say abou
yore paper. No dowt 1t is good won Blu
papers amt no use, and if enyboddy spens mucl
time reeden them tina cant urn thare Twin an s,
doant rede EN-, an so save time and expense
you sea it would cum to too dollars A yere, al
that wood by enuf tobacker to last me munth
at leest think foxes doant orter spend thar
munne on papers, my father never did an evr,
boldly sed he was the smartest man in tn,
! countre, and had got the intelligentest set o
buoys that ever dugg taturs think foxes or
to kno enuf too no corn and pix stun withou
reeden The Rurel ana other farmin papers, an,
If evryboddy wus of mi mind. thare wood b
no such A thing es paper in these unite'
states.
The above piece of composition is "proc
: positive that newspaper are of no use, an
thai they ought to be sup1rsssaI.