davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25
(ro GE CoSTISUED.)

How TO TELL a LAwYER-A few days
since gentleman, being beyond the limits
of his neighborhood, inquired Of pert
negro if the road lie was travelling led to a
certain place. Cutlee gave the required
but seemed curious to know
who the stranger was, and his occupation.
For the fun Of the thing the traveller con-
c'uded to humor ebony little, and the fol-
lowing dalognc ensued:
My name is, and as TO The busi-
ness follow, if you are at all smart, you
can guess that from my appearance-can't t
you tell that am timber cutter2'
mo, boss, you no timber cutter"
"An overseer, then?"
mo, sir. you no look like one."
"What say you to my being doctor?''
Don't think SO, boss, dcy ride in sulky."
"Well, how do ycu think l will do for a
preacher T.
81 sorte 'spects you is dat, sir"
"Pshaw, Cuifee, you are greater fool
than took you for-don't I look more like
a lawyer than anything elsea"
'No, Stree, Bob, you don't dat"
"Why, Cuffse?"
"Why, now you see, boss Is been ridin'
wild you for mile, and you hant cussed
any, and you know lawyers alpays cusses."
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

A gentleman passing through one Of the
public offices, was affronted BY sorne Of tie
clerks, and was advised 70 complain Of it to
the principal, which he did thus:
n have been ahmed by some Of the ras-
Gals Of this place, and I come to acquaint
you Of it, as i am told you are the priucipsl!" J"
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

Tom strikes Dick over the shoulders with
rattan as big as your little finger. A
lawyer, in his indictment, would tell the
story rs follows:-
"And that whereas the said Thomas, at
the said place, on the year and aforesaid,
in aud upon the body Of the said Richard,
against the people Of the State of Pennsy-
vania, and its dignity, did make a most
tiolent assault, and inflicted great many,
and di:ers blows, kicks, cliffs, thumps,
bumps, contusons, gashes, hurts, wounds.
damages, anil injuries, in and upon the
head, neck, breast. stomach. hips, knees,
slins and heels Of said Richard, with divers
sticks, canes, poles, clubs, logs Of wood,
stones, daggers, dirks. swords. pistols, cut
lasses, bludgeons, hlunder bussess, and
boarding pixies, then and there held in the
hands, fists, CLAWS, and clutches Of him, the
said Thomasa"
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

CELLARs.-Thcre ought to be no cellar
in any family dwelling. The house should
be one or two feet above the ground with a
trench around it foot deep, so that the
surface Of the earth Immediately under the
floor sould be always kept dry to the depth
Of er.yeral inches, and there should be open
spaces in the "under pinning," so as to allow
free circulation Of air at all times.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

We have heard, in our days one of the
first counsel at the bar mention that on
one OCCASION, he had called -ststhe shop Of
the elder Sugden, when the latter, IN the
course of some familiar small-talk Of which
BARRIERS are 50 fond, remarked. "Tve sent
my ron to be lawyer, sir, I hope no offrnse,
but I've tried him At my own profession,
aud be hadb't the genius fori it.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

FAMILY all gathered around cosy fire.
Affectionate littledaughter with ear ache. 10
deep reverie, "Mother." says she, my ears
have gone to where have never been !"
Where to. my child ?" asked the fond
mother. ITO aching" (Aiken, was her re
ply. Mother looks with profound astonish-
ment at her precocious daughter.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

ROBERT HALL did not lose his power or
retort even in madness. A hypobritical
condoler With his misfortnnes once visied
him in the mad-house, and said, in win
ming tone, "What brough you here, Mr..
HaIIa" Hall significantly touched his brow
with his finger. and replied, "What'll never
bring you, sir-too much BRAIN"
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

A glutton Of fellow who was dining at
hotel, in the course Of the battle of knives
and forks, accidcntly cut his mouth, which
was observed BY Yankee opposite, who
bawled out-"I say Mister, don't make
that hole in your countenance any larger,
or we shall all starve."
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

Nearly all the suicides in this country
are by forei gners. Yankees rarely. if ever,
make away themselves; for nearly every
one thinks he has chance of becoming
President, and at anyE7rate, his curiosity
prompts him to live on, just to see what lie
will come to.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

GoLD-We saw on Monday last beautiful
and rich specimen Of gold. picked up by child
upon farm about seven miles from this place.
There were three pieces VIII ich had seemingly
been cut from eacli other in order to get the
rock out. and weighed about 81 pennyweights.
Being pure gold, without any observable i'm
purities Of rock or gravel, they sold for near
their value. 325. This is perhaps the largest
nugget of gold ever found in our State.
LdurenaviHe Herald
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

A year and half ago, four young ladies,
in Cincinnati, were married at the same hour.
Two have since separated from their hus-
bands, and the other two are trying to got
seperated.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

The Western New York papers record
the marriage, at Plattsvile, on the 10th inst,
Mt 70 P. M. of John Bivens and Miss NJ.
A. Turk, and in the same issue annunce the
death OF the bride at 8 O'Clock on the same
evening, of hemorrhags Of the lungs.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

A QUAKER lately popped the question to
fair Quakeress, thus: "Hum-yea, and
verify, Penelope, the spirit urgeth and
moveth me wonderfully, to beseech thee to
cleave unto me, flesh of my flesh, and bone
Of my bone l""Hum-truly. truly. Obediah,
thou hast wisely said, and inasmuch az it
is not good to be alone, I will sojouru with
thee I"
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

A census of the population Of Rome has
just been completed, from which it appears
that the total Of the inhabitants is about
one hundred and eighty thousand three
hundred and fifty-sevcn-a figure at about
which the city has remained fot the last two
hundred and ffty years
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

Capt. John Travis. the great pistol shot
has gone to Huntsville, Ala, to display his
skill in the use Of that weapon. He propo-
ses, at the place named, among other ex-
ploits, to shoot at half dollar in the hands
of boy who travels with him.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

"Taking them one with another" said
he Rev. Sidney Smith, 81 believe my
congregation to be most exemplary observ-
,rs Of the religious ordinances for the
Door keep all the fasts, and the rich all the
casts.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

An awkward man attempting to carve
goose, dropped it on the floor.
"There, now !"excaimed his wife, "we've
lost our dinner"
"Oh, no, my dear" answered he, it's
safe; have got my foot upon it."
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

Rusticus wrote letter TO his love,
And filed it full of warm sna keen desire;
He hoped to raise a Aane--and.so he did;
The lady put his nonsense in the fres 3
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

The Senate Of New York, has passed a
bill prohibiting the admission Of boys in the
New York Theatres when uuaccompanied.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

Docs ofevery kind, settlers, pointers, bulls,
Newroundlads, mastiffs, and terriers, are all
lap doos-when drinking.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25
ANONYMOUS Journalism.

Newspaper writer's in France are required
to aflix their signatures to their published
articles. 1t is the opinion Of many that this |
regulation, which in France is compulsory |
measure OF imperial policy, might well DC
cxtel I'D, not by law, but by voluntary Gus
tom, to the wings Of journalists every where.
There are very few things. if anything. i'll
which it would not he equally honorable
and profitable for men to take the RESPONSE
blity Of all statements made and opinions ex-
conccalmnt is expeaicncy. and surely, ex.
pedency is but IL poor substitute for homes,
cau,lor. There are no mysteries with hon
est men, says Sheridan and wo doubt
whether right can ever be so much in sub
jection TO wrong as to be under the neces-
Siy Of fighting it with its own weapon Of
deception.
A signed article appears boldly, with all
the authority, and no more than the author
ity conferred upon it by the name appended
to it. If it bc true and meri,orious, its author
receives just praise and If it be false or SLAM
derous, or in any way contemplate, its All.
thor, and no other, receives his just reward
Of contempt; or, if need be, legal punish
ment. An anonymous article is like an a
nonymous lc,ter-a stab in the dark, instead
Of an open challenge, if in disparagcmcnt
Of its subject; and, if ir praise, Intellectual
ard unserviceable, as having no credit nor
responsibility.
Very often newspaper and magazine arti-
cles receive 81 degree Of ofattenion which they
may not deserve, because supposed to be wri,
ten by some tavorite writer; and, on the
other hand, articles Of great merit fail to at
tract attention, simply because attributed
to authors of inferior ability. All such
misjn,!gmcnt would be at once avoided by
the adoption Of custom Of placing the re-
sponsbiIitv Of good or bad writing where
it belongs, by publishing in all cases the
name Of the writer.
Literary history present numerous Illus
trations of the injury Of literary concealment,
not only to poor authors, but to literature
itself. Many an obscure writer has wasted
on the desert air, the sweetness of the flow
crs Of his mind, when, if known as the au-
thor Of even u single verse or line Of prom
ise, lie might have planted the paradise Of
undying thought an cvcr-blooming tree for
| the intellectual delight fall succeeding ages
The merit OF Virgil's first poetical effort, a.
anonymously published, was. for a time. ap
propriatel by another. "Thus, ye bees"
said the poet, in his retort on the bold pla
giarist, "do ye gather honey. but not for
yourselves" Who can tell how much in
justice has been done; and how much has
been lost to the world of mind in the mis-
appropriation of the great thoughts and
words of others q Washington Globe.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

There is . Yankee whose uosk afsnu
sharp. that after using 9 pocket bsu s
chief for q week, it is full Of holes.
The independent press. (Abbeville C.H., S.C.) 1853-1860, 1859-02-25

The want fit the fslloto.
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

! them. farorabln in his

requested himsto notice them favorably5 in his
journal. The editorEheing ssasibl ble5man, sent
nlm this ansser;:---..The SCENT which you, ssat
Tor my approval isn't worth q cent and SO in
your request there is no sense" e9 - a7as
AiIssP PELLlNG.7zl el!ipg, ,howeyerfinexcusa-
3tel gives rise to good deal of amusement "a
country clergyman showed us "a letter lately
tom the widow of parishioner. thus. worded:
My diseased husband requests to have you
preach him funeral sermon, ,sfrom thefnine-
teenth chapter5ofgJ Job the last clntcs, 7" Clause
AEoTnER OF THE SANE SoRT:
41y.SDcer DIR. PdrsoR-T take up nv pen
VII. WIN PIeasure to let you too deer
tttle 6abbies respired last night and wishes to
nave nave me 5erryIngs to-day in the family berry
ing ground, whchis more comfortable and. .Clricr
Tor the poor little deerssto lay in than the new
one. Seeing that in their lifetime the little ones
ssI Me[e always crawling round theiire and in the
Irt .II anu Ut wass an impossible thing to keep
Sheln clean, nyswife has chosen this affecting
text Though ye have lain among the pots
yetsllall yc be winter than snow" !,
Why is agmin eating soup with a-fork like n
person kissing his sweetheart Because it takes
SO long to get enough Of it.
1T is undeniable, that, in America. sit5takes
three to make a#pair-he, she, and a hired girl
t1ad Adam been a modern, there would have
been hiIed girl in Paradise to look little
Abel and raise Cain.n y :.
A SLEEPY PRAYkR.-A Virginia negro bov..
VINO proiessed to be drcadfullY alarmed title
cholera, took to the woods to avoid it, and was
there found asleep. Being asked why he went
to the woods, he said, "ro Pray!" 'sBut," sa id
tne oveFSeer, now was it! you went sleep?'
Don't know. massa, ''zactly,n responded the
negro; "but / spec l must have .oycrprayed
myself" = -
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

HoUsEFURNIsHlNe HARDWARE.
M As on hand large assortment of Iousefnrnis1-
IL ing Gands part OF his stock consisting of ne lok
sd with poEeelap Walt
Dominion Coee-pots Bird cages Cutlery Britannia and
BLACK Tin Ware Tinned and Ensmeled Hollow Ware Brass
Kettles, &c, > S 90"
he requests Of his customers: p.blc generally
particular to his PrreEer
it9v one wishes to sRyeICe the Old Dominion nee
P~ makes the best coffee and soon win in saving
fact"rtd Tin Ware wholesale retail Any articles not
on hand viii be made to order at the notice and At
renE0 liable prices. ~
~ FRUIT CANS 4LWAT8 ON.H4ND.
Those IN want of housekeeping Goods, will we'll TO call
on hm HIS articles are too numerous mention. Those
who call will ind every article for fitting oat fne
'ho0sehold. C. f. STIFEII,
iny2S-d ON No. 173 Slain st Wheeling Va
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18
a FULL ASSORTMENT OF

TORIETING PAPERS, News and Book; Colored Papers
all kinds, Sra~ Boarls Binders AMI Truns Boards.
Bonnst Boards White and Pnerg Cards Gard
In syeTy and Shoe Paper Wal
and Manila Paper; Press BoBrds. full q
ErenS Polio Post Packet and Letter PAPER Marble
Post o0cO nd Bank Envelope; Wrapping PapcrE
Shsathing Tack and Spice Papers; Printing d Writing
Inks. Alum. -Ble eachfng Pow eTa. -. = .l-t -
az Paper of every description ulaie to ord or
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

~ For sale by LAUGuL1Ns & BUsHE1ELD, Agent.
Wheeling, Va eel SnflkgIy
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

1B- Prepared and sold by yHosTETTER g.
SMITH, Pittsburgh, Pa, and sold by all
druggists, grocers, and dealers generally
throughout the United States, Canada, South
: AI,nar.inn n1,r1 Caarr,nnr,1r
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

NHE above onmpG5es arpdEnte the rndernta1ed
their Agent for wheeling and vicinity, respect
fully solicit the patronage ofthe pubc Said Companies
" adjusted. N. C. 1RTIIrR Acrent FsET5
oHice over the Citzeuii 4 epostt Bank, - s.
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18
AssnTs IANuARY q. 1esa..

To,a, r,,.b,,t,,... &l,soesg7.ss
Unsettled st claim not due. ........ &1I8.s26.s4
Losses EquitQ1ly Adjusted and 1'qonptlg Paid.
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

UPWARDS OF 81, 100000 .
OF Losses hays been paid by the Etna Insurance
the past IS years.
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

C44Sa C& 4n4aud Navigation
Risks accepted at terms consistent with sovenev an
80 fRFs profit. - =
pecG1k dttEntfon GtUezE to Insurance of D WEEIYNGS
ana Co"te7tsJo'. terms Of to 5ysaf8. -
Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-10-18

@. a. STIFEL,
HI~nufacturer ofSTin &s sheet Iron ware
Baltimore Wecker. [volume] (Baltimore [Md.]) 1851-1867, 1859-01-10
2. Ser 0otriot.

2eile auf Den 3eben trat Ger Obeyfamner.
berr ron Sdlaben in pa8 Glantenaialu1er,
frau ron Steiu Ihritt ibn rpran, unp 2a benz
2ager ibre8 G)euabls biueileno, bstra1tste Ge
ibn mit pelCr8ten an9tprOen 0lden.
Sn Der 3bat, Der 6reiberr bon Stein bate
ein lebr franfe6, teipenpe8 AuSleben. Seine
gSan9en paren ein9eTalIen uno BON elmer tGpt,
ttden 8ldle. feline 4u9en ll9eu tief in ibren
SSblen uno Glleten III ienem ei8ent9iimli9en
tladeraoen 6euer, oa5 nnr ooS 6ie6er perleibt,
letne bleideu, fdmalen 2ippen paren au89e,
rDrrt bon ben Sieber9lutben, uno Der Granfe
perIn1te ieoen Mpnlent lte nit Der Spibe leis
ner 3un9e 81 tUblen unp au5ufeudten, mdbs
renp eine Itbeul5uye lar9lam aR8 leiner gruIt
bercpr3itterten
Serr pcu SAlabeu ld,aute in tiefer inncrer
8ewe9un9 gu Dem Sranfen bin, lno Elm ge,
fabl uneuolIder Irauer uberiAl1 lein 6era
ST muBte erfenren, paB 6rau pOn Stein Nedt
babe Oa6 Diele QeiOen5Beltalt nidI i'm 5tance
iei, (H ron ibrem Eager 6u erbeoen, um D<m
Ofuf Ds8 8oni9S gu icl8en, er ia8te liA, RAP ct
umlonIt 9efcmnen IeL uno cbue 3feultat mics
Der Iort9eben mUIIe, uno piele llsbsrseu9un8
nadlte ibu laut unO l1wer5li4 auIieuf5eu,
Der &ranfe bate oielen Seuf5er 9ebort unO
elm leiles 95delu 9lltt iiber leine 3ise bin.
Sic finoen mid aLIo lebr franf, Derr .. S6lae
peu? fro9te er nit leler 5ltternper Stilume.
Nidt mabr, i4 bin uHr ucA Der Suatten OeS
Jrlden, ftdltl8en WeaaueS, Der Dor einisen
Oaonateu in &SaiSspera 9lbdeo nabm ?
Sie is3eu, ih fanu nOA Imuer metne Spmpas
tbien fir BreuBen nidt auf9eben, ida eifere ibnl
tn allen Staden uah. 4reuBeu 1T aud nur
nod eiu Sdutten BON Gem, mas es ppr tur5er
Baltimore Wecker. [volume] (Baltimore [Md.]) 1851-1867, 1859-01-10

3ett na0 mar, e8 fdulpft aud feinen Tcbess
tampt nno plrp tim erlte9en, meun nibt Elm
ltarfer Nrnl e5 balo aulrtd)tet.
a6er oieler Itarfe Arm lpiro fcmmsn II. lpirb
PreaBen aufrt4ten, Ia9te 5err ron Shlapen.
S2se 8lauben eS fta8te De, Srante. gBOtlte
9ctt, oaB Sic 0le4t baben. ater 9llleS,
mas idl bSre, 1T tribe unO per3meiflunospcu !;
MIR leben IN eiuer 3eit rer @tutcorauna uno
GnedtIdaIt, in ter Die Wlanner uht8 8elIereS
uno 9etbrIu9enoere5 tbun f6nnen, al8 lih in
oa5 8rab 3u retten, melt lie bort alletn nccb
;5rebelt finOen f6nuen. Sis ieben. oaR i'd,
nd) ldlpn gu oieier lesten Jlettung biuneae /!
aeer MIR woGen ieet niAg Dou mir Ipredeu.
Ipnoern Bon 3bneu. l6aS fibrt gle tieper /?
S0eldem 8lafllden 3uIdn pertupfe I'd, Sbren
A5eInd { Dfem 2lrjt la8te mir, sic Ieien out
Der OnFdretle be0riffeu, unp oa Sie BON mel
ner NFantgeh 9ebori, pinidten Sic mid gu
ls9sn, Welhe9 lit pa5 3iel Sbrer JteiIe +?
so febre pieoer 3uruf nad) Wtemel IN oem
PfeaBHqe" aonI88paar, ia9te 6erc ppn S4ta-
Den.
Ag, Sle ltno ein treuer Diener, Ieulste Serr
BON Stetn, uno Sic lino 5u beueicen, oenu
maa nlnlmt 5bre Dtenlte an, man beaearet
Sbnen nlnr nit 0obn uno Spott, man beban.
oelt Sic nlNt mt iiberutittlger geruatana,
nnO le8t Sbnen Sbren @iIer uub 9nten gDiaen
nidt ol8 S6srDiui8teit uno @iBcnOiufel aus.
gSaDrlldl Ste lino gu beneipen, cenu sic f5n.
lien belfen nit Sbrem Nrm, 5brem aepf uup
5brenI oerden, auf DaB DielsS NreuBen, mel
0e8 leet oarnlecerliest, d, pieoer erbebe uuo
pIecer uuTlteDe aus Oeu GGutt uuD cen Grim.
netn. Ste lino ni4t petpammt. untbdtig uno
mlBl9 lei Settle SIT treten, unO nnBlpS Sbre
2a8e gu rertrdumer, ltott in Der Nrbeit uuo
nuet'den &9dtl8feit I'D Grcit uno @rfrildune
5u luAen. Sb, i'd iasc 80 nod einrlal, sic
-itno 81 beneIoen
g8dbrenO er fpra0, batteu eine bleiden
IanBen 1t1 sefirbJ unD ieine Stimnle, pel4e
uDrber 10 Ifwah uno matt gemelen, batte an
Strait uno 3on 9eupnnen. Sebt ober, erldSpIt
pom SpreGen uno Der inuercn Grreaun1, lanf
oerr ron Stein in Die ailen 5urtf, uno lAlcB
Die Iu9en.
Baltimore Wecker. [volume] (Baltimore [Md.]) 1851-1867, 1859-01-10

sJss tas 8. 8 { !, 9aItimprs1 lgeasF" .ssi&sss
tsbsa IlesBta tnit 4gsnahme bss 5cnntdss) TN.
fotet asnts psr g8elef, az be Etaess aSbibas,
Dee ,,gDsGer" plpa ebensaIs Ia 2odi9tn8tsa una
Bpseitn6 t1aItG buFh If&ser ben at9ah = 81
ms oaus 5sfOfBt
Dur5 bic Dof pzrleuset fcitst Der tGsItds .21edfr
$3.50 per Sdbt, In 0KbtbtRGter Serd u g
96Gans
- 0as Bgaen0Tatt bes Baltimore sBedsi
sgfaetusie6en Eretoe ps6 fOe' iatrii@ 81 In uuts,
ain9tcr @praasbe5agInna.
Baltimore Wecker. [volume] (Baltimore [Md.]) 1851-1867, 1859-01-10
:. s2eraa9aeaesesa p0r sge2ua.lffer'a Sssitt1pe.
zSrpcerets gzseisre, Gtauors 1c.

Nene 0on. V01.zSGE:gge nao SarOelien.
ais sen sais 0uis3nra empaussn ttet Sass ReNs st.
&puspati6e une a eesn, eeStahraGu SGnBe, msl9e
ptt characterization blt8f afgebea tanten
Wt. 9 d hneto er unb G 8 rt y,
A. Scutb 4Sorarbfr.
The Abbeville banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1847-1869, 1859-02-17
RATHER ENTHUSIASTIC

Tho following story is acknowledged to
be "good 'un" but we believe it has not
found its way into the papers to any great
extent.
A few years since, some roguish boys in
town not thousand miles from the cap
ital of New Hampshire, persuaded Joseph
~, or as he was generally called,
Joe" to attend Sunday School. Joo was
an over.grown, half wit,ed profane lad and
the boys anticipated considerable fun; but
the various questions asked him were
so rcoctily and correctly answered that on
one could for Il moment suppose that l,c was
not vcrScd in theological lore,
Joe was duly ushcrcd in and placed on
scttcc in front of one on which his Eiirnis
were seated, and recitation commenced.
The teachers first questioned the class ON
their regular lessons and afterwards turned
to joe
My, friend, who made the world We in
habit 81
"Eh! !" said Joe, turning up his eyes like
an expiring calf.
"Who made the world We inhabit?"
Just lis he was probably about to give
the answer. one Of the boys seated behind
him, inserted pin III his Doc's) pants
about nine inches below the ornamental
buttons on his coat.
Coa -limiyAty" answered Joe in an
elevated tone, at the same time rising to his
feet.
"I'at is correct" replied tho teacher
"but 1t Is not necessary that you shoull
rise in answering; sitting posture is just
rs well"
Joe was seated and the catcchsm pro.
cccled.
"Who died to save the world"
The pin was again inserted, and Joe re-
piled "Jcsus ChriSt!" in a louder tone
than before, again rising from his seat.
"Ihat is also correct but don't manifest
so much feeling; do be little more re-
served i'll your manner" said the teacher
in an expostulatiug tone.
After Joe had Gained down tho exami.
nation went on.
"What will be the doom of a wicked
men 2" was the subject now up for consid
Grafton, and, as tho pin WAS again "stuck
ill.," Joe thundcred out, with still niger cle
vation Of his body, "Hcil and damna.
ton !"
My young friends" said tho instruc
tor, "you gave the true answers to all
the questions, but while YOU are here
we wish you to be more mild in your
words. DO, if you can, restrain your en-
thnsiams, and give a less extended scope to
youI feelings"