Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-05-04
from the Cleveland PiaIndealer.l
Aricmun Wmrd Sees PiccoIomInl.

Gentz-I arroved in Cleveland on Saturday
P. NJ from Baldinsville jest in time to fix my
self up andiput on clean billed rag to attend
Miss Pickldhomony's CRATE musical sorry at the ;
MelOdcon. The krowdS which pored into the
hall augured well for the show bisnis Il with
cheerful sperrets l jined the enthusiastic
throng. l asked Mr.. Strakhosh at the door if
he parSt the perfession, and he sed not much he
didn't, whereupon | bawt preserved seat in
the pit, and observing to Mr.. Strakhosh that he
needn't put on SO many French airs becawz he
run with big show, and that he'd better let
his weskut out a few inches orprehaps he'd bust
hisself some fine day, went in and squatted
down. 1t was sad thawt to think that in all
that varSt anjience scarcely sole had the honor
of nv acquaintance. "& this ere" sed bitter
w, "is Fame! What sigerfy my wax tiggcTs
and Twin wild beasts (Which hav no ekal$) to
these peple? What do they care becawz site
of my Kangaroo is worth bubble the price OF
admission, and that my Snakes is as harmlls as
new born babe-all of which is strickly
troo-?" shood hav gone on ralein at Forth
and things sum more but jest then Signer Mac
carony cum out and sung hairey from sum
opry or other. He had on his store close 4
looked putty slick, must say. Nobody didn't
understand nothin abowt what he sed so they
applawdcd him versiferusly. Then SignGr
Brignoly cum out K sung another hairey. He
appeared to be in PcnSiv Mood & sung LuV
song spose, tho he may hav bin cussin the
auiIence all into heep for aut knowd. Then
cum Mr. Maccarony & Miss Picklehomony her
self They sung Dot together.
| Now yu know, gentZ that don't admire
opry music. But like Miss Picklehomony's
stile. There has bin Crater singers, and there
has bin more boOtifu wrnIn, but no more faS-
sinatin young female longed for new
gown, side to place her he'd agin vest pat
tern, that Maria PicklehOmony. Fassinatln pc
pie is her best holt. She was born to make
/ hash of mems buzzuns aud other wimn mad
I tl,ry- hniD pi,kl phDmDuips t.
sparkles with amazin cuSsednesS, and about 200
1.-TWO hundredJ little bit Of funny devils air con-
tinually dancn champion jigS in her eyes, said
eyes bein brite enuif to lite pipe by. How l
shood like to haV little Maria out on my farm IN
BaldinSville Injiany WHARF she Good run in the
tall grass Wrastc with the boys, cut up strong
at parin bees, make up faces behind the minis
ter's back, tie auction bills to the skOolmasters
coat tales set all the feers crazy after her, and
hOler i kick up, & and 90 it jest as much as She
wanted to. But digreS. Every time she cum
canterin out, | grew more and more deIlted with
her. When She bowed her he'd bowed nine
When she powtid her lips, l powtid mine
When she larGed larfed. When she jerked her
he'd back and took larhn survey of the audi
euce. sndn a brOadSde of sassy smiles in among
EN-, tried to lnjnt myself Il kOilapsc. When,
In telIin how she d:empt she lived in Marble
Halls, she sed it tickled her more than all the
rest dream she loved her Teller still the same,
| made an effort to swaer myself; but when, IN
the next song she looked Stratc ut me anu call
ed me her Deer, wildly told the man next to
me hc mite hav my close, as shood never want
EN- agin no more in this world. The Plain
Dealer containiu this communicashuL, is not to
be sent to my famerly in Baldinsvie, undo" no
circumstances whatSOmcvcr.
In concuShun, Maria, want you to do well.
| know WI air nice gal at hart yu must get
u good husband. lie must be man of branes
and gumpshun & 4 good Providcr-a man who
will luv va ist as much in your Old age, when
yonr voice is cracked like an old tea kittG & yu
can't get of your notes discounted at 80 per
sent month, as he will now, when you arc
Young & charmin 4 full Of music, sunshine II
fun. Don't marry snob Maria. Yu amt a
Angel, Maria, & I'm glad Of it. When | see
angels in pcttycoats Pm always sorry thay, haint
got wings so thay kin quietly Ay off where thay
will be apreshated. Yu air n woman, & a nifty
good one too. As for Maccarony, Brgnoy,
Mullenholer and them other 1ellers thay can
take care of thcirseves. Old Mac. kin make a
comfortable Twin chopin cord wood if his voice
ever givS out, & Amodio looks as tho he mite
succeed in conductin some quiet toll gate, WHARF
the vittilS would be plenty d the labor lite.
am prcparn for the Summer Campane |
shall stay in Cleveland few days probly you
will hear from me agin ear leave TO once more
BEGUN n tosser on LIES temPestuous billers,
meaning the Show BSneS.
Very Respectively Yours.
ARTEMuS WAED.
Prom the Cleveland Heraldl