The Kenosha telegraph and tribune. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1859-1860, 1859-10-27
E Il e WIT ES,

WHEN is Congress like hen? When it's
sitting, to be sure.
WHEN is bonnet not a bonnet2 When it
becomes lady.
The suicides throughout the United States
now average about nine week.
SOCIETY, like silk, must be viewed in all its
situations, or its colors will deceive us.
ALL faults are pardonable when one has the
courage to avow them
DID anybody ever eat flour made out of 8
young mans wild oats?"
| PEOPLE are seldom tired of the werld until
the world is heartily tired Of them.
! They declaim most against the world who
have sinned most against it,
GENEROUS mind does not feel as belono;nr
to itself alone, but to the whole human race.
In respect to the unseen and unknown. the
Imagination is better guide than reason.
B.echer.
oF every hundred farmers sons who leave
nome to become clerks or otherwise, in towns
or cities, only three become rich.
4H 10 d Olt OF Iaise money, and he who
passes 1T frequently is as! bad as he who original
lyiutters it.
10 LOVE something more than ones self is the
secret of all that is great. To know how to live
for others, is the aim of all noble souls.
THERE is thought to be very little use in a
mans meaning well. if be cannot express his
meaning by his acts.
SALLY" said young gent, preparing to
take snooze, ''if any one calls. to Il them I'm
gone" Gone where, sir 2" Gone to Sleep
WHAT'S IN A NAME Y"-Mrs. Partinptop
thinks that P0Hy-tics, from the "queer turns"
they appear to take, should be named Ann.tics
NEW York City is about nine miles long, and
not more than mile wide. Present popu!a.
ton not far from 100000, including suburbs.
THAT'S very singular" said a young lady
to gentleman, who had just kissed her. "Oh,
WELL my dear Miss, will soon make it plural
A YOUNG lady who had lost, or mislaid her
beau, was advised to hang up her fiddle She
SAID the advice did great riOtence to her heart
strings.
| WHEN you receive note from your lady-love
and kiss it (as, of course you are expected to
do,) why is it like the nightmare Because it
ia the ink .you-buss.
LIE should be trampled on and extingui sh
ca wherever found / am for fumigating the
atmosphere when suspect that falsehood, like
pestilence, breathes around me.-CarIyIe.
sanctifed heart is better than silver
tongue heart full of grace is better than
mead full ofnotions man may be great schol
al, and yet be great sinner.
The ball in the emblem says, "The harder
you beat me down, the higher 1 shall bound
toward Heaven" so Affections do but elevate
and raise saints affections to Heaven and
heavenly things.
1T takes four things to make thorough gen.
tieman You must be gentlemen in your
principles, gentleman in your tastes, gentle
man IN your person, gentleman in your mau-
ners.
Never quarrel with lady. Ifyou are tronb
led with her, retreat; if she abuses you, be ST.
lent if she tears your cloak give her your coat
If she boxes your ear, give her bow in return
if she tears your eyes out, feel your way to the
door and fly.
TIMOTHY TITCoMB AND HIS PIGs.-Dr. Hol-
land recently read poem at county fair il
Massachusetts. He sang of pigs as follows:
The pigs here thal literary brood,
/ So much condemned. so little understood
/ The pgs, that like our literary men,
Sleep IN the strGac d live upon the peR,--
| The pig, thst through al time perpetuate
Tie wondring thing that purchased man his mate,
Ana pays us Tor the ruin wrought by Madam
/ With 'he old spare rib sacrificed by Adam"
TAcITUs says that early marriages makes us
immortal. 1t is the sole aud chief prop of en-
pire. That man who resolves to live withou;
woman, and that woman who resolves to live
without man, are enemies to the community in
which they dwell. injurious to themselves, de-
structive to the whole world, apostates from ma
ture, and rebels against heaven and earth.