Randolph County journal. [volume] (Winchester, Randolph County, Ind.) 1855-1862, 1859-01-27

A JOKER OUTWITTED.
BY JAMES scorr.

too, some OF them, but Dill Brush was
the most invcterate. and at the same
time, the most successful one ever
knew personally, joking was his
hobby. or rather, sort of idiosyncra-
sy. to which all other habits, tastes,
and inclinations which he possessed
were. in great measnre, subscrvient
Had he devoted half the study to his
Legitimate occupation-carriage paint
ing-that he did to concoctng aud
carrying out schemes to "sell" the un-
wary. he would. no doubt, have been
u star painter, instead Of sccondratc
iuuber-a consideration which, by the
! way, might be proftably applied to
The cases of several gcniu,es of my ac-
quaintance; but. de gusfiJus non estdis-
putunium. Being utterly unscrupu-
lous as to the means employed, and
having no respect for persons in the
selection Of victims, it is not surpris-
ing that this peculiar kind of amuse-
ment got him into some ugly scrapcs,
several of which terminated in boot
applications AMI pugla>tic dcmonstra-
tions of sanguinary character, Bill
always coming off with the outlines of
his countenance sadly marrcd, and in
state Of complete physical dilapida-
ton. One might naturally suppose
that these Tile drawbacks would teach
him caution, il not total forbcarance;
but no. he was too thoroughly devoted
to this strange passion to be cured by
rnght but some powerful remedy
His disease was chronic in its nature,
but there were those who knew how to
treat it, and were busiy preparing n
dose for him which-but ] am antici-
patiny.
He was the only jouncyman painter
employed in the shop. For assistants
. he had couple of boys, of that inter-
cs!ing age when youngsters first begin
to feel hankering after calico, and
talk largely Of the enormous expense
incident on two weekly visits to the
barber shop. Bob and Ike, the afore.
said boys, were most bitter, uncom-
promising enemies Of Bill Brush,
against whom they were compelled, in
self-dc.chsc, to wage constant war, for
he gave them no rcst-no peace. Not
a day passed but saw one, or both Of
; them, the victims Of some lamboozling
operation, much to the mcrriment Of
the balance Of the hands and the tri
umphant exultation of their prosecutor
They often attempted to retaiate III
the same manner, but seldom succeeded
owing to the fact that they did not
sufficiently study and mature their
plans before carrying thein into cxccu-
ton. This remission, considering the
mastcr-spirit they had to deal with,
was a sad oversight, but one which
they finally discovered and took meas
ures to obviate 1t became evident to
them that, in order TO insure success,
they must plot-must form plans un-
lerstood 10y both, and must hit upon
some ingenius combination of circum :
stances which would efIcctualy draw
the wool over the eyes Of their ever
= vigilant antagonist, and then, when OF
his guard. open out on him with some
wcll-deviscd and carefully arranged
coutrivance which would expose him
TO the ridicule Of the whole shop
Beat him badly once" they argued,
land we can do it again; besides, it
will take the conccit out of him to be
overreached at his own game. At all
events, we will try" Such was the
conclusion they arrived at, after an
evening spent in consultation. and they
mutually agreed thenceforth to devote
their minds and energies to the dis
cumfiture Of the great joker.
1t was ono of those cool mornings
too cool to be comforts b.e-which
often occur in early autumn. Bill, on
arriving at the shop, gave orders to
put up the stove, and sent the young
sters to bring it from the shed. where
it had been slowed away in the spring
AS they were ascending the stairway
on their return, it became evident
that they had been quarreling for loud
and threatening language was freely
exchanged between them. The
"boss" painter was surprised, as he
had never known them to fall ont be-
fore.
Don't roa tell me again that !
stole Mrs. Bricktap's water-melons. or
I'll warm your ear for you!" exclaimed
II Ike. vehcmently. as they deposited the
!: stove on the floor.
o takes bigger feller than you to
DO that. you swcll-head, youl" retorte,l
Bob. de6antly.
! "Swell-head, ch. I'll swell your
head"