Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1859-02-19
WHEEL.
THE INTELLTGENCER.

DANCERS OF skArrso.- correspondent Of the
Philadelphia North american, writing from a
town in Massachusetts,, where skating is all the
rage, tells about his adventures on the ice with
Mary. Hear him:
Who Aary is-Mary is rs pretty piece of
humanity in the shape Of woman as you could
find this side of Heaven. Such eyesi such
hair such teeth And her hand Well now,
therel think it was just the smallest, the
\ whitest-why, ivory is slow toit. And her foot
was like little white rose bud its snowy leaves
just showing enough to set off the neat covering
that concealed the rest from profane. eyes. It
did not seem foot, as one saw it reposing in
its tiny kid slipper, like a Canary bird IL its
nest. Ht
Nary has the Skating FSrsr-Well, sir, this
Mary caught the skating fever, which is now
raging so fearlully. / heard her express n wish
for a pair Of slntes, and the next day she had
the best pair that could be found in the city,
and nobody knew who sent them to her-but,
bless me, how my head bOils at the thought of
the consequences.
Harry puts her Foot Into tive went down
upon the ice, and there that little devil of Mary
just sat quietly down, ordered me on my knees,
and quietly placed that foot, the poetic myth in
my lap, and bid ne put on her skate, Sir had
Venus dropped down from Heaven, and bid me
rub her down with rotton stone and oil, it could
not have astonished me more than when that
divine foot was placed in my unworthy lap |
felt very iaint-but buckled on the skates, and
stood up, with Mary by my side.
The Bachelors Head SteiBss-Have you ever
taught woman to skate2 No; well let me
tell you. You've been in room lined with
mirrors, haven't you? You've seen kaleido
scope with few bits of old glass, &C., in a tin
tube, and turning it, have all sorts of beau
tiful figures. just imagine kaleidoscope, and
in place of beads and broken glass, please sub
stitute blue eyes, curVing eyelashes, lips, ivory,
wavy hair, crinoIine, gaiter boots, zephyr worst
ed, cupidS, hearts, darts, clap of thunder,
flash of lightning, and ''auld Nick" Imagine
yourself in the centre of a system with all these
things revolving round you, and violet bank
breaking sighs upon you all the while, and you
have Mary and her victim in the first skating
lesson.
Caters in the pit Of his Stomach.-But just
let me try to describe our performances. Mary
and sturt-she on my left arm, all square,
Lord have mercy on my poor puzzled brain
while ! try to unravel the stirred and mixed
rainbow of sights and sentiments. First Mnry's
dear little gaiter boots presented themselves to
my nstonished vision, and, before | have time to
wonder how they came up before me, | feel
them pressing their blessed beauty, with em-
phasis, into the pit of my stomach
,AaTy Pitches into him GsneraUy.-Next
scenes-wavy hair, with thirty dollar bonnet
and a divine head, comes pitching into my
waistcoat, with such force that feel the hut
tons against my spine Next-Mary gazes up
at me from between my jack.boots, aud anon
her blessed little nose is thrust into the bosom
of my shirt An! my friend, all research and
study on the mysterious subject of woman has
been comparatively in vain, till in this eventful
year of 1859, the fashion of skating has opened
new and varied sources of information.
Harry Su6dues Him.-Dear Maryl j offered
myseIfto her every time she turned up, or came
round. am hers; but wish to enter my sol
enn protest before the world, that she alone
could not have conquered me- But who could
hold out, when surrounded by an army of Marys
on skates? | am hers! = but Pm awful sorel-
All! have learned something. Cupid makes
bachelors tender, as cooks do tough steaks, by
hammering and pounding.