The weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington, Iowa) 1858-1860, 1859-02-08

- 1hoNeW Yegk 1sI11ne.
I'D AEts al Kasnes.
- ~ infeIAgencs o this which
comes T. u - r. u Sogshern vindss What
Egsetls re q are 1se which reach our. it'll
aet4 eas1N Whist saccharine scandal 10 this
VII bhes, g sish silver favors and milk
Fjodissaisl gossIp3 7hss benignans Jovs.
weary Of - ceaseless fissicufEs Of our dsliber-
alive and delirious Congress, and weary, too, Of
the solitary dreariness Of the white House,
uhich even the smiles re Niss Lana can only ins
part dtssipate. has persuaded Hymen % kindle
brand.-neW torch, which BY il purity Of hight
shall dim for time the great and malodOrous
pitch links Of Cuban controversy and Kaneas
confagration. Nov doth Il become che Old
ladies 70 be darzing their lacea, and the yeang
ladies Il, be adectionAts 70 parental purse bear
ers-to be rapid and ready with the rarentsl
slippers at nigh, and to surpass themselves %
to the parental muffin in the moening, that their
bills may be long in the ledgers Of tradesnen,
and may be liquidated without volcanic out
pouring of the parental lava. Now should that
gentle bard Who whilom sang Of the parti-hued
ball of Senator Gwin aud the immense shoe-
buckles Of my Lord Napier, buy couple OF
pounds Of rOsin for his bow and new e string
for his fiddle; for troubadouring, as We predict,
will soon be in high fashion. Now should the
hamblest Member Of Congress purchase new
pair Of backing brushes. and either three paper
or two linen - dickeys;" and also frank al his
shirts home to be washed. For, If the cores
pondent Of contemporary journal is TO be
credited, an event Of the rosy description is 1t
hand. and, We may say, at heart. The Presl.
dent Of the United States, for nearly century
content to be 9 fraction, lie about to be convert.
ed into matrimonial uuit-has felt those ires
which oftenest carbonize the hearts OF the cal
low, melting the SHOWS upon his frosty now.
bringing up from 2e below TO at least 8 above
0 his sangnineous temperature, and driving him
With gentle but irresistible force to the por-
chase OF handsome brown frock coat, white
vest and cravat, and patent-leather pumps"
Matrimony imminent, as this correspondent
firmly believes, can alone solve this sartorical
and sutorial problem; and when We hear that
Mr.. Buchanan has purchased two bottles Of tho
Hair Dye, and has been
" clustered up" with his dentist, we shall ct
once purchase a casket to hold the piece &c
cake which our old friend will send us. and
which we shall exhibit to the public according
to arrangements calculated to prevent a rush
and to preserve life. When the happy day ar
rives, we shall issue extras half.hourly from
sunrise until the Geographic operators sink ex.
hausted upon their batteries, and leave the |
world in an odor OF sulphuric acid We cannot |
pToMise pictures, ous We rave engaged Drawn |
70 boss" our reporters in the Capital, so that |
We shall not miss crumb Of cake nor an ell |
Of ribbon.
Does the reader ask what conjunction Of the |
'sars did these good times coming determine ? |
Does he remember how the great Louis, the /
orudest monarch of Europe, su:cumbed to the |
widow OF the profane Scarron? Does he re- |
member how the bright-eyed Widow Wadman
,om6arded that foolish fort the heart Of /
he avuncular Tobys Has he forgotten those
eductive influences which proved TOO poten, for
he sagacity of Pickwick and overcame the
simplicity Of Weller? And can it be supposed
bat when the Grand Monarch yielded; when
he heart. which the terrors Of Namur and Ro-
MILES could not intimidate, struck its colors
ND opened its gates to Cupid when the great
Intellect which propounded and demonstrated
be theory of httle-bats found itself not CAP
ured and yet-Dodson and Fogg assisting-a
aptive; can it he supposed that the President
8 proof against the Establishments Of the beauti.
ul and the bereaved? Forbid it, o winged.
low bearing boyl forbidthe treasonous thought!
Let the Congressional Chaplains-both Of them,
or it will take two-rehearse the service! Let
very editor in the Presidential pay prepare
eader! Let every powder monkey make ready
,iles OF cartridges! And finally, let Mr. caves.
he reporter Of the. Secret Senatorial Sessions.
md the two black cats, give US notice early Of
ne happy, happy, happy day!