, 1859-09-09
LOVE WORKS WONDERS.


Ny friend Tom has natural affection for dirt,
or rather dirt has natural affection for Tom.
II is to him what gold was to Midas; whatever
he touches turns to dirt. No matter how white
the cravat-no matter how immaculate the vest,
the moment that II comes within the sphere Of
Toms influence, its whiteness is gone-it Is inn
maculate no longer. Dogs, sweeps and lamp
lighters never pass him without leaving upon his
dress unequivocal marks Of their presence.
Once and once only, saw him cross the street
without encountering the wheels Of q carriage.
opened my mouth to congratulate him, and be-
fore could utter one word it was filed with
mud The careless blockhead lay at my feet,
full length in the gutter. At my earnest solici.
tation, he purchased suit Of precisely mud
color. It was q capital idea. He crossed the
street three times; he walked half mile, and
turned, in appearance, at least, unscathed.
The thing was unprecedented. True, he was
welcomed by the aifectionate careSses of dog
that had been enjoying the coOlness of neigh
boring horse pond true, he received shower
bath from the wheels Of an omnibus. But to
plaster mud on Toms new coat, was ito gid
refined gold-to paint the lily"
"Tom will be neat man yet" sale, as l
witnessed the success Of my plan.
In about half an hour It was my fate to meet
o gentleman with seven stripes Of green paint
on his back; It was my friend Tom he had
been leaning on some ncwly-painted window.
blinds.
His shoeblack declares that "he can't see no
use in blackening his boots when they never
remain black" and his washerwoman, with q
very proper regard for her own reputation, has
been compelled to discard him, not from any
iIl-will, but, as she declared with uplited hands,
"ifany one should ask me if washed Mr. Smiths
Clothes what could tell them" But there
fhin0a in fhia svorld ,,h;ok
Tom could have more easily dispensed than the
services Of his washerwoman.
Having no other amusement, one morning
strolled over 10 Toms rooms. As assembled
the stairs, heard his voice in very decided
tone, "but 1t must be done, and so there is an
end to it."
"Rcaly," was the reply, "anything within
the limits Of possibility, but, to make a coat
in ten hours-I will PrOmiss anything in the
world, but really fear shall DO unable to per.
FORM"
"If double your price would be any object"-
"Certainly, sir, If you insist upon It; certain
". | viii put every man in my shop upon Il;
it shall be done in time. Good morning, SIR"
The door opened, and a fellow with shears and
measures passed out What could Tom be do.
ing with tailor!
"Just the man wanted to see, /" he exclaimed.
81 require your advice upon very important
affair; which Of these cravats do you think most
becomingl" and he spread before me some half
dozen, Of every hue and fashion.
"NOw, what in the name Of all that Is wonder
ful, does this mean, Tomi A fancy ball, is it!
You have chosen an excellent disguise; your
nearest friends will never know you. But you
cannot support the character; IL you had taken
that Of q chimney sweep, now; but that would
have been too natural Tell me truly, Tom, what
does all this meanr
"Why, the fact is, Frank" passing hand
through his hair, redSlent Of macassar, al have
concluded-I think shall be little more neat
in the future. You, doubtless, remember the
good advice you gave me some time since; il has
had an excellent effect, assure you"
Now, It sohappened, that Of all the good ad-
vice I had ever given Tom, this was the first in.
stance in which he had seen fit to follow It So
could not attribute the metamorphosis Of my
friend to my eloquence. Who but woman ever
changed sloven to a fop.
"Pray, where are you going this evening"
continued, shat you must have new coat so
suddenly"
"Goingl nowhere in particular. I had, in
decd, some idea Of calling on my old friend, Mr..
Murray; no harm in that, hopei"
Conviction began to fash upon me.
" Your old friend, Mr.. Murray; and his young
niece, Miss Julia, has no share in your visit,
4
night!" ,...y ,.
"Now, upon my word, Frank, you mistake me
entirely. ! did not know that she was in town
last night-when I-that is, when IL did not
know anything about it,"
"And SO you were there last night, too
Really. this IS getting along bravely." 4
"Why, the fact is, Frank, you must know
everything | called last evening, to see Murray
on some business, about that real estate, you
know. l had no more idea Of meeting woman
than bOa-constrictor-my beard was three
days old-my collar dittO-and the rest Of my
dress in excellent keeping. became engaged
in conversation, and, somehow or other, Tor.
got oil about the real estate"
"And so you are going again to-night-and
that Is the secret Of your new coat I"
"By no means; wanted a new coat, and tai.
lOrs are 30 long, you know. DO you think blue
will become mel Blue is her favorite-that is
| mean blue
"Oh, go on--don't stammer- is her favor.
ite color, Is itl"
"The fact is, Franl--take another glass Of this
wine-the fact is-gOOd wine, isn't III been two
voyages to the Indies-thc fact is, l suppose
rather fancy-l am little in love. Try some Of
that sherry. What are the symptoms, Frank
queer feeling about the heart, and something
which drives the blood through one like light
ningl"
Exactly believe have seen Juia--short
and chubby, isn't she-with red hair, and little
squint-eyedl"
"Frank, never did knock you down, though
! have been tempted to do SO = great many
times; but II you don't stop that nonsense, I
will"
"Quitc valiant in the defence Of your lady.
love. Well, Tom, will confess that she ID a
lovely girl, and tomorrow ! will come and
learn your success. So good morning"
"Well, Tom, what SUGGEST"
"WOuh you believe i'll she did not recognize
mn ~