The Grand Haven news. [volume] (Grand Haven, Mich.) 1858-18??, 1859-04-27
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.
"A jealous husband threatened to
chastise the 'eyening star for blinking
nj his wife.

Mt his wife.
If petticoat government is not moro
oppressive now than formerly, il is Ger
tainly double in extent.
Did Byron refer TO waspish young
ladies when he wrote "Our young affec-
tions run TO tcaist"
- Tho worst feature on mans face
is his nose-when stuck in other peoples
business.
= There is a tendency in modern edu-
cation to cover the fingers with rings, and
nj the same lime 10 cut the sincws at the
wrist. r..
- 1t is fair step towards happiness
TO delight in the conversation of wise and
good men; where that cannot be, the
next point is, to keep no company at all.
We seldom regret having been too
mild, too cautious, or too humble; but
we often regret having been too violent
too precipitate, or too proud.
AS is the chief concern Of wise men
to retrench the evils of philosophy, it is
the efforts OF fools 10 multiply them by
the sentiments of superstition.
"A good action is mover thrown
away" This is the reason, probably,
why we find so few Of them 'lying
around loose"
= An editor says that when he was
in prison for libeling justice of the
peace, he was requested 10y the jailor TO
give the prison a puff.
al will lay a wager said one
sportsman TO another, "that | will shoot
more crows to-day than you." 80, YES,
you can beat any one Growing"
- An old coquet looking into a glass
and seeing her wrinkles, cried: This new
glass is not worth fartbing. They can
not make mirrors as well as they used TO
dow
- The editor Of the Minnesota Times
says he "can generally manage, by hook
or by crook, TO get up a pretty good pa
per-" Prentice says he does il principal
ly by hook.
We sleep, but the loom of life new
or stops; and the pattern which is weav-
ing when the sun goes down at night will
be still weaving when it comes up in the
morning.
- 1t is anticipated that the railroad
from the Mediterranean 10 the Red sea
will be finished this year, thus adding
another link TO tho chain of brotherhood
Of nations.
- The Port Gibson (Miss.) ReceiUe,
notices the death of widow Christopher
Holly, free woman Of color, and says
4" She died owning thousand acres Of
good land and thirty negroes"
- In ancient DAYS the precept was,
"Know thyself." In modern times, il
has been supplanted by the far more
fashionable maxim, "Know thy neighbor,
and everything about him.
An old sea captain said he never
knew but one man who had good en-
cuse for going to sea; and that was
Noah, for if he had remained on shore he
would have been drowned.
= An elderly spinstcr wrote to q
friend, "a widower, with ten children
has proposed and | have accepted. This
is the number should have been entitled
to if | had married at the proper time.
Miss Tulip, speaking of old bache-
lors, says, they are frozen out old garden.
ers in the flower bed Of love. AS they
are useless as weeds, they should bC
served in the same manner-ehoked.
- James II. Moulton, a facinating
shoe maker, aged twenty-three, has beer
arrested at Little Falls, n. Y, on a re
QUESTION from the Governor of Massa
chusctts, for polygamy. He had already
married three wives and was OH the poin
of uniting himself with fourth.
al wish the ladies had the privileg,
of voting" said a politician, the other day
"Why," said abystander, 'do you thinA
your party would gain any strength there.
| byp "Not particularly that" was the
reply, "but it would be interesting TO
electioneer with them"
-" Hontz, what's the matter"
"Mine Cot, dc sorrel wagon has run
away init dc green horse, and prove de
axle tree of dc brick house what stands
by de corner lamp post across dc tele-
graph. Mine Cot what beepples"
If YOU wish to know whether a
clergyman is really good or not, don't
consult his congregation, but his servant
girl. If man has the devil in him,
there is nothing that will so promptly
bring il out as badly cooked sirloin. II
is not the pulpit that tries mans piety,
but his kitchen range.
- The fisheries at the mouth Of the
st. Joseph river are a source ofno small
profit 10 the owners. Some 1000 bar
rels were caught there last season, valued
at $4,000, and at least $4,000 worth
packed in ice and sent fresh TO the Chica-
90 market. On Thursday the Gath ult.,
saws the Trdreler, a Mr.. Murphy brought
in twelve hundred fish the product Of one