Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1859-02-03
A HARD JOKE,


The Mobile Advertiser, Of the 18th utt,
tells the following good story Of a notorious
practical joker in that city, yclept "straight-
Back Dick" :.
Dick was at the wharf, one day last week, :,
when one of the up-river boats arrived, look
ing, doubtless, for some uuwary individual
upon whom to exercise his talent He watch
ed closely the counteuance of each passenger
as he stepped from the plank upon the wharf,
and, at length, fastened his gaze upon an in
dividual who, from his appearance and man
ners, was considerably nearer Mobile than
he ever had been before. He was evidently
ill at ease, and had probably heard the re-
ports which were rife in the country, rela
tive to the hundreds who were dying in Mo-
bile every hour from yellow fever, The man
started off towards Dauphin street, carpet
sack in hand, but lad not proceeded far
when heavy hand was laid upon his shoul-
der and he suddenly stopped. Upon turn
ing around, he met the cold serious coanten-
auce of Dick, and it seemed to send thrill
of terror throughout his whole frame. After
looking at him steadily for about minute,
Dick slowly calculated:
"Yes, you are the man. Stand straight"
With fear visible in his countehance: the
poor fellow essayed to do as commanded.
"Straighter yet, said Dick. "There, that
will do" and taking from his pocket small
measure, he stopped down and measured him
from the toe of his boot to the crown of his
hat, took pencil and carefully noted the
the height in his pocket-book, to the utter
amazement of the stranger; after which he
measured him accross the shoulders, and a
gain noted the dimensions. He then looked
the stranger firmly in the face and said:
"Sir, am very sorry that it is so, but |
really will not be able to finish it for you
before morning"
"Fiuish what?" asked the stranger, en-
deavoringin vain to appear calm.
."Why your coffin, to be sure You see,
l am the undertaken, and the people are dy-
ing here so fast, that can hardly supply the
demand for cofins. You will have to wait
until your turn comes, which will be to-mor-
row morning-say about nine o'clock"
"But what the devil do want with cof-
fin? I have no idea of DYING"
"You havn't, eh? Sir, you will not live
two hours and half. I see it in your conn-
tenanco. Why, even now, you have pain,
slight pain, in your back"
"Y-yes, I h-have, replied the trembling
hoosier.
"Exactly," said Dick, "aud in your limbs
toow -
"Yes, stranger, you're right, and begin
to feel it in the back of my neck and head
"Of course you do, and unless you do
something for it, you'll be dead in short
time, assure you. Take my advice, now,
60 back aboard the boat, swallow down a
gill of brandy, get into your state Dom and
cover up with blankets. Stay there till you
perspire freely, then leave here like light
ming"
Hoosier hurried on board that boat, and
followed Dicks instructions to the letter.
On Monday he was met by gentleman at
Chronicle, to whom he related his wonderful
escape from death by the yellow fever, even
after preparations were: being made to pro-
cure his coffin. He says he will never forget
the kindness of the tall man in Mobile who
gave him such good advice.