The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1859-09-29
Divorced by Mistako.

Oac winter there came 90 Iflutau, y j.,
tvu mru, named Smith and Jones, who had
lu,a oi them designs upon tlc legislature.
Jou,, h,d d bad wife, and was iu love wilma
pretty Woman hc wished TO be divorced
from. h,, hld wifi, 20 tha, hc mightmarry the
pr'p Woman, who, hy the way, vo, widow
vilh bi,,s ,y,s agd aueA a form Therefore
Jaa.s came o. Trenton for divorce,
Smi,l Ail a good WIFE, good os-au angel
nnl ,hr mother Of tyu children, and Smith
a,I vaatto Dc tno,c.d;rlal ail want 90
s,ta rHmpr amuplsorp PLANK road to
extend from r.g', Run Co terrdpin Hollow.
Wei, thcy, ei,h these l.Grcut orauds,
omc 90 Trenton, aui allr-s,ed the assem-
L'pl n,,Ioui-wi,h tho usual arguments, first
-ePp,ft, '..-4i!y composed of ~ steers aud rich
background Of voui,lu, second, liquors in
great plenty, from Jersey lghuiug," which
B., @ Kind ,f locomotive 90 ull speed, reduced
to liquor shape. to Newark champagne. To
speak iu plain pro~r, the divorce man gave
champagne supper and Smith, the turnpike
mar, followed with caampagn, breakfast,
under ,ho modifying Influence of which the
.,,.wJ.cl wisdom passed both the divorce
aaI turnpike bills, aud Jones and Smith-a
copy ol ,a.h bill iu their pock,ts-vcnt rc-
-..glE l1mc, over miles Of sand and
Through a.l lhc u1u.a,ion Of many stage
D..,I,s.
Smith nii,,l'Doma 10 the evening, and ~
Bot. sat, ,ooH ig biz ..sra, AjA plp,ly wife be-.
side inflow pretty she did laoA g. and.
l>[ az her children o,uhcar.ug the other
d,c studying their lessons in the corner Of
thc ruom, Smith was induced to cNpa,n,c
upon ,1e good result, of his mission to Ircu.
ton.
a turnpike, my dear, am one OF the d..
roc,ors, and Will be president. 1t viii set
mc zap, loves we CON send our children to the
boarding g-school, and live in style out of the
toll Here is the charter honey
Let me see IT, said the pretty little wife,
who was one of the incest Of wives, with
plumpucss and goodness dmphng all over
her Cace, let me see it, as she leaned over
Mr., Smiths shoulder.
But all at once Smiths yisogo grew long,
Smiths wiic's ,isagc grew black. Smith
was not prolauc, but now he ripped out an
awful oath, Blast US, wife, those Internal ras.
calls up a, Trenton have gone and, divorced
us
1t was too true, the parchment which he
held was bili of divorce, in which the names
Of Smith and Smiths wife appeared in fright
fully lcgiblc letters.
Mrs. Smith wiped her eyes with the cor
ncr of her apron Here's turnpike, she
said sadly, and with the whole Of our ten
children staring me in the mcc,I Amt your
wife. Here, a turnpike.
Blast the turnpike, and the legislature,
and -
Wen, the fact is that Smith, reduced to
single blcsStlncss, enacted into a stranger to
his own wife, swore awfully Although the
night was dark, and most of the drnilcns Of
Smiths town had gone to bed, Smith bid his
wifc.to pu on her bonnet, and arm in arm
they proceeded TO the clergyman of their
church
Goodness bless me-. exclaimed the good
man, as he saw them cnter-Smith looking
Ike the last of June shad, Smiths wife, wip-
ing her eyes with the corner Of her apron
'Guodury- bless me- what is the matter"
The matter is, | want YOU to marry Us two
right of, said Smith.
Marry your calculated the clergyman
with expanded fingers aud awful eyes,
are you drunk, or what is the m,ucr with
you@