Kenosha tribune & telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1856-1859, 1859-03-03
Chemistry Of Marriage.

Oil is one thing, and water is another.
They will not unite. Shus them up in
the same vessel, and each obstinately
refuses to coalesce with the other, and
each doggedly keeps its own side OF the
house. The grease will not sympathize
with the water, nor the water with the
grease.
The laws of civilized nations make
certain provisions for uniting consent
ing man and woman in the bonds of
matnmony This is very proper and
needed regulation, and is sanctioned by
Holy Writ and the laws of nature
Men and women marry, and are said to
become zone flesh" and are so in the
eye OF Heaven and the Law.
This would seem to be very bene-
hcient institution, and calculated to
promote the happiness of the species, if
the relation did not SO often prove
source of misery. Undoubtedly there
are thousands of men, and thousands of
women, whose only misfortune is the
fact that they are husbands or wives
The man is a sorrow to himself, and a
grief to her whom he has promised to
love, cherish end protect. The woman
counts up her present and her future
IN one long ray of unhappincss. Home
is msnomer, a place Of torment. In
short, the husband is grease, and the
wife is water; there is no law, civil or
ecclesiastical, that can unite them
They are married after the fashion of the
country in which they live, but there is
no union, and they twain are no more
zone flesh, " than a piece Of pork and a
piece Of mutton. They are not; we
deal only with the fact, not with any
transcendental theory, and what they
might be is quite another thing.
The records of the criminal courts,
the observation Of reasonable men, and
the experience of every thinking per-
son afford abundant evidence that the
matrimonial state is a lottery-that in a
large proportion Of cases, the relation
results in positive misery. In vain have
moralists and Psychologists written
books about the fitness of the parties,
contracting the obligation; in vain have
young men and young women been war.
ned of the necessity of making pru-
dent choice; the evil still exists, and we
suppose it will till the millennium comes,
when humanity shall cease to be selfish.
There is a moral chemistry, that
would do much to alleviate the suffer
ings whichmatrimohy engenders; which
would actually make the parties unite,
and become zone flesh"
The housewife does not expect grease
and water to unite; but she adds pot
ash to the discordant elements, and from
her laboratory comes forth, not grease,
not potash, not water, but substance
different from either-soap.
Now, we suppose there is potash
whlz:l might be introduced into the
chemistry Of matrimony. The grease
and water of naarriad life may some
times, if not always, be united 30 q. TO
form a perfect union. Our chemical is
concession. If woman always expects
her husband to yield, or a man his wife,
the sacrifice will be all on one side, and
war has already been declared. He or
she becomes q tyrant, however gently
and lovinglythe behest may be enforced.
They who live together beneath the
same roof must yield their opinions,
their methods, their purposes to anoth-
er. If Benedict finds that Beatrice
loves him, adores him, is willing to make
any and every sacrifice for his sake, let
him gently use his power; let him meet
her half way, and the strife shall be not
who mast yield, but who may.
If any OF our married readers like our
lesson in chemistry, they are at liberty
to make the experiment we suggest, for
1t requires neither furnace nor retort-
nothing but loving heart.-Irue Fag