The Tiffin weekly tribune. (Tiffin, Ohio) 1859-1868, 1859-10-14
10 4.
ODDS Ann ENDS

at Chlchourills IN the forenoon, and fop
days before there hti been q boat bu.ied
and heap Of people scaldod and killed
one way and another. So at last as went
into q eroccry3 squad Of people followed
in, and one bowed and said:
"its one Of the unfortunato soffoTcra
BY the Dustin Of the Frsnkiinr.n
Upon that he Uxcd me 10 drink with hlm,
and a. I pul The tumbler 70 my mouthhe
stopped me OF q sudden.
II beg your pardon, stranger, but
"Rut whhtW ucz I.
gost 6x your mouth that way agrin,"
ser no.
done Il iest a. wac g'yin 20 drink, an
TN be hanged II ] didn't think they'd OH
70 into 6ts. They yelled and hooed Hks
a gang ofwolves. Finally one ofthe gang
ecz:
Don't mako fm ofthe unforanalc;he's
hardly got over bcin blowed up yet. Let's
mako up a pnas Tor him.
Then thel sll throwca In and niado up
Eve dollars. Aa the spokesman handed
me the chsnge, be axed me.
Where did you 6nd yourself after tho
isplosionp
1n fut boat, sez I.
How far from Franklihr SEE ho.
WHY aez I, i never seed her. but AZ
nigh as / can guess, about three hundred
and seVenty-ive hiiles.'
'You'doughierHeon that sungakeeSddle.
MvsrEHy .-0I say Murphy; WHATS tho
meaning Of mystery Faith, Twas reading
the paper and L said Il was niystsfovs
how IN was done"
"welL Pat" said Murphy, "rn teach
ye. Ye see when I lived Wits my father.
little gossoon, they gave apaptliy and mo
went 10 buy somcihin' for the partly 10
ate, and wid lot Of things she bought a
| iulfhxfrol Of pork, ye sec. Well, she
put II down N the collier, bless her oaid
aolgl, for safe keeping tln the partly came
on, do you soc. Welt, within the partly
came on, me mother stint me Own into the
caller 70 get some pork, do ye see, Well
whin the party oome on, me mother sint
me down into the cellar TO get some pork
40 ye see Well wiut down 10 the bar
= rel and iiahed about, but divil the bit Of
.pork could | find; 20 4 looked about tho
2 barrel 10 see where the pork was and
found a rat hole In the bottom Of the bar
INl WNNIt Aul NNiN ANN III NNN NAN NNN
= left the brine standing,do you see"
"Hould on, Murphy, honid on wait
Bit; now toll me how could oil the pork
get out Of tho barrel and leave the brine
stsndinglr,
"woii Pats" said Murphy, @that's what
I'D like to know moselfdo ye soc; there
the mystery"
\ A Coon SroRy.--kn anecdote worth
laughing over, is told Of man who had
an infrmity,' sswen as an appetite for
fish. He was anxious 20 keep up his
4 character for honesty, even while enjoy
ing his favorito meal; and while mEking
a bill with his merchant, Us the story goes
and when his back was turned, the hon-
est buyer slipped a Goldfish up under bis
eoat-tail. But the garment was too short
10 cover the THEFT, and the merchant per-
eeiyed t.
Il Now aaid the customer, anxious to
improve all opportunities 10 call attention
10 his virtues, Mr.. Merchant, ] have trad
ed with you a great deal and have paid
you promptly haven't u,
'Oh, yes, said the merchant, 4 make
/ no complaint
, Well said the customer, Il always iH-
sst that honesty Is the best policy, aud
the best rule 10 live and die by
That's 90, replied the merchant, and
/, the customer turned 20 depart.
: Hold on, my friend cried the NOR
} chant, speaking Of honesty, ! have a Bit
Of advice 20 give you. Whenever you
como 10 trade again, you had better wear
: a longer coat or steal a shorter Goldfish
A WARNNe TO ON BAnHELoRs.-The
members Of the Royal Statistical Society
Of Great Britain have paid great eiten.
ton to the subject Of human lie, and have
Just concluded thorough investigation,
which has occupied the last fourteen
, years. The result Of their iaboru is, that
| the duration Of life Of muried men h
: greaier than that Of IinhaTried melf--ths
! difference being bA years in favor Of the
+ former,--Def. A AdUsrfistr.
i Besides that married man lives more
: In one year than bachelor would In an
I entire eteFnity How much longer, ther6-
! fore, does a married man live than a bach.
: eloTl Bachelors are not expected 10 an
4 awer, a. il is presumed they do no not
, know how to multiply.
: II is stated lately, but should apparent
: ly bereceived with some grains Of allow
/ 9noe, that hull raised near palmyra, N.
!. p, wqa 90 very vicious that X was aeeid-
: ed 70 XIII him. So the noighbora assem-
! bled and shot him full Of balls, which on
!, " inforiated the beast. After long time
he was penned up. and tied securely with
/, ropes and chains and a tEo-inch au4tr
/ hole bored in his head; a pound oC Du-
! points best rife powder was put Ia and
r8mmed down, and hia head blown to
/, pieces. ThTy-6ve minutes after thif,
his tail was ip active moiioui whisking
illes on his hide.
n VAtrGaLK As a CospBSssE.- man
who does not claim 70 Be aindgs ofsWlne
says:
aI,ast spring / bodgh, a litdo Die ifom
a drove, and he was gopd for eating bot
wodldnt grow much. He gut - a5ter 4
I week or two that no would eai lafte
bucket full Al a time ahdthen.. Ike Oil
yer Twist, called for more We'll, enc
morning, carried out a #ater bucket full
Of dough and after he had swallowed a
all, picked dp the pi6 and pa IA tho
same bucket had fed q from, en1 iie o.
le euss didn't 10Y a. IN"
4 Al lrish Preacher Ees co8sidsldlly
: annoyod (es many before and since hupo
likewise been) BY persons getting Up and
AMI going ~ church during the seTnon.
\ His patience being exhausted, b. stopped
Biz discourse, andin arowdy way. cfolaim-
ed; SEQ on ny lad I've soen he iop 0i
your head. that unongh. Tho fellow iQfn-
ca Ground, and, cast with 81 anetg. nlenae
cling loQk, muttersd; "l'll oca soa agein.
uirln You hid better Gee mg now. w.
piled the Preacher. TO-. WHEN fuf 81 l1o
lnnlnin L lahll - a. - I'm l--u.-n