The Jeffersonian Democrat. [volume] (Chardon, Ohio) 1854-1865, 1859-04-29
The Little Courtesies Of Life.

Inc lolloWihg article appeared IN the
Philadelphia Inquirer, more than n year
ago but it is as worthy of a wide crcu-
lalion now, as when it was penned How
many unpleasant and unkind feelings
might be banished, and how many petty
differences avoided or healed, if all
would cherish the sentiments it expresses :
"A kindly word, pleasant smile,
Are better far than gold"
4 friend, some time since, came 10 us
and expressed great annoyance at what he
regarded as an act of marked discourtesy
on the part Of gifted and accomplished
gentleman, to whom he had rendered Il
valuable service. He was quite excited
at the time, not that he cared so much
for the circumstance, but because it was
calculated to dim the high picture which
he had formed in bis mind OF the nature OF
the man. He had set him up as the
model Of Christian gentleman, the very
embodiment Of finished, polished,
graceful and dignifed character. And
vet, to his surprise, be found that he
lacked one of the great essentials, namely,
common courtesy, or ordinary poiteness.
In other words, he had either refused or
declined 10 answer note that had been
sent 10 him on his own business, and this
refusal was kept up for days, until it be-
came necessary 10 refresh his memory,
and offer one or two sharp admonitory re-
marks. But this is no extraordinary
case. 1t is but one of thousands.
The little courlesies of daily life, the
kindly and graceful amenities which are so
admirably calculated to sweeten the rela-
tions between man and man, and to impart
genial spirit to our social every day inter
course, are too frequently neglected. We
either forget, or we overlook them. We
do not sufficiently appreciate our own
sell.respect, or the feelings and good
wishes OF others. This is more cuIpable,
for courtesy and kindness are at the com
mand of all classes-the poor as well as
the rich, the humble as well as the ele.
vated. Some persons never think it
worth while TO reply TO note or an inv'
tatlon, unless some especial business mat
ter be involved. There are others again,
who never omit such an act of courtesy
and duty.
In the first case, misunderstanding, ir-
ritations and unkindness will inevitably
occur, and, in the last, all these will be
avoided Some one has observed, truly
and lorcibly, that the little courtesies Of
lite should be regarded and cultivated
from early youth, What indeed, could
be more delightful than the interchange Of
civilty, kindness and good will, on all
proper occasions, between friends and
neighbors? What SO calculated to soften
the rugged path of existence, and to give
the human heart agreeable feelings?
Some time since, a gentleman and lady
were betrothed, and the proposed union
was looked upon in the most approving
manner by the parents of both parlies.-
1t so happened that the former had occR-
sion to visit Europe, and to remain abroad
something like six months. He wrote
home elaborately, or few words, by
every packet; but, during the whole o!
| this period, he received but three letters
in reply, and of character so brief as to
show that the lair correspondent took very
little interest either in the subject, or the
object to whom the epistles were addressed.
The effect was TO annoy, irritate, create a
GOODNESS, and finally TO break off the
match.
The truth is, no one likes to be treated
either with indifference or contempt A
sense OF sell-pride revolts against such
conduct. The courtesy We extend to
others we naturally and properly desire
to see extended to ourselves in return
Reciprocity is the very soul of harmony,
friendship and good feeling. A sensitive
individual may be aggrieved and wounded
just as readily by Indifference and neglect,
as by an open and studied insult.
By courtesy, we do not mean alfec-
tation, hollow pretense, shallow hypocrisy
and artificial manners. On the contrary,
these are all miserable counterfeits. But
we reler to a genial, generous and kindly
spirit, sense of appreciation, a recogni-
tion OF equality, truthful air, and a frank
and manly bearing. Not day goes by,
in which these qualities cannot be exhib-
tied more or less, especially in the sphere,
and among the friends with whom we
move and mingle. There is, on the
other hand, nothing more unworthy, un'
man y, piliable and mean, than 10 tyran-
nize over and insult, not directly perhaps,