The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1859-08-05
NUMBER 6.
HUMOROUS GLEANINcs-

/ ~ When q woman arrays herself
q la Bloomer, it may be said that she
fants for notoriety.
/ or The best adhesive label YOU can
put on a baggage, is to stick to il
yourself.
IL Why is the Mediterian the
dirtiest of seas 7 Because it is the
least tide y.
| IL When man runs off with the
wrong idea can he to compelled to
bring it back again /!
II Why is. the east wind like q
famous American painter Z Because
its Ben West.
| II A German writer observes that
in the United States there is such a
scarcity of thieves they are obliged.to
offer reward for their discovery.
6T In a charity sernon in behalf
of the Blind Asylum, thu preacher
grayely remarked, aIf all the world
were blind, what a melancholy sight
it would be-"
~ Why is the mischievous boy
who attaches tin lantern to the caudle
appendage of bis dog, like the poets
hero +? Because he
Points moral and adorns tale"
n Woman is Justly called " one
of the most glorious works of heaven !"
and she is sort of work that we like
to address ourself to.
~ Fowls seem exceedingly grate-
full for the gift of cold water. They
never swallow drop OF. it without
turning up their to heaven.
~" "Will you stand my second 2"
said a gentleman, who. proposed TO
fight duel. No, indeed--for you
wouldn't stand a second yourself"
| II A poet says; "Oh, she was
fair, but sorrow came and left its traces
there.n The author don't state what
becBme Of the harness.
or An Irishman, writing sketch
of his life, says he early ran away from
his father because he discovered he
was only his uncle.
| ~ Money Is the root Of all evil.
Nevertheless it is an eminently cscu-
lent root, and vote that we dig for it
my friends.
na Mama,n said promising
youth Of some four or five years, "if
all people are made of dust amt mig.
gers madeof coal dust %
| GA school master asked one Of
bis fair pupils, ]. Can you decline .
kiss 2" Dropping perplexed courte-
sy, she modestly replied, eyes sir, but
don't like to-" Very likely
~ An absent wife is here called
upon to returd to bed and board:
Jane, your absence will ruin all.
Think of your husband-your parets---
your children. Return-alI may be
well--yea, happy. At any rate, en-
close the KEEP Of the cupboard where
the gin is.
~ The distinction between liking
and loving was well made by q little
six year cid. She was eating soma-
thing which she appeared to relish
veay much. q Do you love itg" asked
her aunt. " No." replied the child,
with look Of disgust, = il loved II /
should kiss it,
~" What ho you mean, you Rt-
tie rascal ~ said an individual to an
impudenl youth who bad seized him
by the nose IN the street. @Oh, moth.
ing, only ] am going out to seek my
fortune, and my father told me to be
sure to seize bold Of the first thing that
turned ~"
IL An old lady, meeting Cam
bridge man asked him how her nephew
behaved himself. Truly, madam
says he, ahe's a brave fellow, and
sticks close TO Catherine Hall, (name
of college. aTvow," says she, I
feared as fnnch be always had q
hankeringafler the girls from q boy.S
He wont be worth AGENT, if he didn't.
IL What bar is It that opens but
never closest A crowbar.
/ What bar never opens to close. A
sand bar. What bar is always openl
Our r1usquito bar. What bar will
catch lawbreakeEsa A bar-rister. What
bar catches fast young men Z Coins.
bar. What bar viii a stop TO this urr.
necessary bar-teripg A bar-cade.
Y@- A Boston papersays that many
years ago the whole town Of Nahant
was purchased BY a farmer for suit Of
clothes, and that then its only inhabi-
tants were wolves and deer. The