davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
The Poor Printer.
A TRUE TALE.
BY CAPTAIN HAKsLEY.


It was cold evening in the month of De-
cember that Judge Wright was sitting by a
pleasant fire, at the residence of his brother in
Louisville, KY. His little niece was sitting be-
side him with her hand resting gently on his
arm, and her hair falling in ringlets over her
snowy shoulders
" Tell us story of mechanic, uncle, if you
please, for often hear you speaking of them,"
spoke the little girl looking up very innocently
in the face of the Judge.
" will tell you oneof poor printer whom
! knew" replied the Judge, :" if you will only
promise to pay attention to all [ say"
:" Of course will. for | like to hear of print
ersn
q once knew young man." said he "who
lived in little town in the western part of Vir-
ginia. He was of respectable family but not
very wealthy, and the youth, for youth he was
at the time our narrative commences, expressed
desire to learn the printing business, His pa
rents having no objections it, he entered an
Office in the town of W, and WHICH was
carried on by young man by the name of
M. He continued in the Office some two
years, at the expiration Of which time the Office
was sold Quite another firm The former pro-
prietors Immediately purchased another estab-
ishment in the interior Of the State, and the
young man wishing to finish his trade with those
and joined his old employers Time rolled on,
and his apprenticeship was finished, when he
returned home There he meets his old friends
and former associates, and particularly young
lady to whom he was very much attached. His
visits were very frequent, and in less than year
they were engaged to be married.
He in the meantime had purchased a printing
Office, and was publishing paper and applying
himself closely to his Office he made many friends,
and as in the case of publishing a paper, some
enemies. Those who were his enemies had
sought every means in their power to injure him,
but in spite Of all they could do he prospered
in business
But although he was engaged, some of the
ladies of the place, who had set themselves up
as aristocraey, sought an interview with the la
dy's mother, and by falsehood and misrepresen-
tations, succeeded in winning the unsuspecting
parents over to their side, and by her interior
ence with her daughter, the marriage Was bro
ken off.
This was more than the young man could
stand, and at the end Of the volume, he discon-
tinued the publication Of his newspaper, and left
there for parts unknown.
Years rolled on and we find the young printer
successful lawyer residing in New Orleans. =
He had there gained name that will ever
stand not only as being an influential member
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
CHAPTER THIRD.

THE DREADFUL QIscovERY-THE LAGER GONE AND
WATER NON EST coMATIBUs IN HoLDIBUs-THE
THIRsT-FIEND APPEARS
Up from the subaquean depths of that doomed
brig, up from the abdominal regions of that
doomed woman, came cry of despair and ago.
ny, even more intense than that usually produced
by severe attack Of the Jersey cholera.
Mine coot man, oh, mine coot man she
cried, "wasser dere ish not in de brig. have
look in de galley, and have look in de hold-on
de deck, and in de cabin but a0osser dere ish
nein -
T" Mein cot in himmell p he replied, and. in
despair, he broke his pipe
And then, with CLASSY eyes upturned to hea-
ven he prayed for athundershower but none came.
And the red sun grew hotter and hotter, till it
fairly fixed! The children wept, the mother
groaned, and the skipper paced the burning deck
and swore terribly. The thirst-fend was on
board-he glared in every eye, he spoke from
every husky throat. What could they do but
die.
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
CHAPTER FOURTH.

THE TERRIBLE RESOLVE OF SKIPPER VAN sWILLET
wAssER OF BLOOD THE MIRACULOUS DIscoy~
ERY-sAvED, SAVED THANKS BE TO heaven
GRAND DENoUMENT, AND A gABLEAU.
The eyes ofthe Skipper Won Swillet rolled IN q
frenzy of diabolical desperation.
Wasser or blood u he shouted, and he sci
zed rusty hand-aaw, and gazed upon the white
necks Of his swooning wife and fainting children.
One moment he looked, then renewing his terrible
cry of "Wasser or blood !" he rushed toward
his intended victims. But oh, fortunate, mira
culous occurrence His big toe caught in g
ring boltin the main truck, and he fell overheard.
Downtown, into the peagreeR.depths of the
abyssmal lake, he plunged soon he arose, and,
garghng, cried to his terror-stricken wife,
Catarina, gal, dish auasser is fresh as never
was, und ish coot for to drink ~
Then, kneeling on the deck, the happy family
raiaed their eyes in gratitude to heaven while
the brig sped on with increased speed, with flow
ing sheets, before a head-wind, which sprung up
as if by magic. Thus we see that" Fortune
fayors the brave"
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

Long -winded persons can gather hint from
the following :-'' Here john said gentleman
to his servant on horseback in the rear, come
forward and take hold Of my horse whilst | dis
mount and after I am dsmounted you dsmout
too. Then John, ungirth the saddle of my
horse, and put it down, then you will ungirth
the saddle of your horse, and put and girth it on
my horse. Afterwards, John, take up the sad
die of my horse, and put and girth it on your
horse Then, John, I will seat myself in your
saddle and you can seat yourself in mine, and
we will resume our journey"
"Bless me, master" said the man, Why
coulden't you have simply said, Let's change
saddles"
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
Eddicatien.

Two men up in New Hampshire went fish
ing. One totally ignorant Of figures the other
probably, had been to TIE /" Rule of Three
After catching large quantity Of the fnny
tribe, they proposed todiyide them and return
In counting them, it was found they had forty
nine hickory shad "a small fish, very full Of bones,
and worthless and one large, fine, fat bass
They were puzzled to know how to divide Them
as both wanted the bass After while happy
thought struck the man of figures, and he told
his companion he would divide them according
to the rules Of arithmetic, which proposition
was readily agreed to. He then, with pencil
and paper and with a knowing look, common
ced
"Twice FIVE is ten. Five times ten is fifty
Forty nine from fifty leaves one !" and with an
astonished gaze said to his companion, the bass
is mine'1
The other, picking up his shad, started off,
and remarked, What great thing it is to have
little eddication 7,
This reminds us of the butcher we once heard
Seven pounds, ma am, at seven cents a pound
Seven sevens are seventy-seyen. I'll let you
have it for five shillings"
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
Hog in---Hog out.

A good one is told of worthy deacon in the
city of S., in Northern Ohio. The deacon was
the owner and overseer of large pork-packing
establishment His duty it was to stand at the
head of the scalding trough, watch in hand, to
time the length of the scald, Hog in !" v hen
the just slaughtered hog was to be thrown in the
trough, and " Hog out !" when the watch told
three minutes One week the press of business
compelled the packers to labor unusually hard,
and Saturday night found the deacon completely
exhausted Indeed he was almost sick the next
morning when church time came, but he was a
leading member, and it was his duty to attend
the usual service if be could. He went. The
occasion was one of unusual solemnity, as
revival was in progress. The minister preached
sermon well calculated for effect. His pero-
rartion was a climal Of great beauty. Assuming
the attitude Of one intently. listening, he recited
to the breathless auditory
g Hark they whisper, angels say
Hog N, I" came from the deacon's pew, in a
stentorian voice. The astonished audience
turned their attention from the preacher He
went on, however, unmoved-
"sister spirit, come away -
Hog o,t!v shouted the n-.'talLyt our!'
This was too much for the preacher and audi
ence. The latter smiled, some snickered andloiy
while few boys broke for the door to spnt
their sides. y
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
CHAPTER FIRST.

AFLoAT-AFLoAT, ON THE PEA GREEN WATERS OF
THELAKE.
The circumambient god of the rosy day, known
to the vulgar only as the sun, pressed its hot
seal upon the Kissing waters of Erie, just as the
Methisba, with every SAL set, from galleE up to
bowsprit set sail from the ancient city of Bsonia
vulgarly known as Buffalo She was loaded with
op-poles, to stock the. hop plantation of Myn-
heer Guzzle Won Lagerbier, an exiled patriot
who fed from Europe for Europe's good, with
five sons and smoke-pipe.
The Methisbi was a fore -and-aft rugged brig
of full ten tons burthen, and mounted one blum
derbuss and ten-gallon key of lager. She was
manned by Skipper Van Swillet, and his wife
and seven children, who had all learned seaman
ship and navigation in the steerage of Ham
burg packet, which was four months in coming
over the sea. Time enough we trow, to- learn
the ropes, at least, enough to write about 'em !
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

PERFECT Mantle man deserving tn
name. is one whose thoughts and exertions are
for others, rather than for himself; whose high
purpose if adopted on just principles, and never
abandoned while heaven or earth affords means
of accomplishing it. Heis one who will neither
seek an indirect advantage by specious word,
nor take an evil path to secure real good pur-
pose. Such man were one for whom woman's
heart should beat constant while he breathes, and
break when he dies
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
CHAPTER SECOND.

THE CALM-HEAvY FLAPS THE SAIL-THE DRoWSY
sEAMEN SLEEP, AND SILENCE THUNDERs DER
THE DEEP.
They were out upon the glad green waters of
the pea green lake. In the opaque distance,
the gellorious city Of RiSonia with its gilded
spires, shone like new milk pans in multitudipous
array. Madame Catertna Van swillet, was
about to explore the sabaquean depths of the
hold, to find quantity of souri, raut and swine
flesh fordinner when Skipper Van Swillet seized
his trumpet, and said
"Katy, mine coot frau, bring me Elm lager pa
Yah, mine coot mansl" she, replied, and
few upon two dumpy legs of boiled lobsterian
hue, to obey her lords behests
Meanwhile the gallant brig stood nobly on,
in dead calm
Suddenly, in tone of agony the devoted wife
cried
"Hans, oh, Hans, mine coot man. der lager
is nein The key dere ish none in p
And she buried her moonlight face in the
gloomy profound of her hands, and wept.
eden, bring me wasser, for [ am as try as der
duyvel !" cried the gallant skipper.
And she aroused her from her grief spasmatic,
snd few again to the subaquean depths of the
vessel for water, that.
Precious boon of Heaven,
Tomen and women given,
Without money, without price,
To weaken milk and make it NICE
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
Yankee Courtship.

Cottage by the hillside,
Time unto dark,
Dorothy beside the fire.
Waiting for spark
Old by the chimney,
Reading Boston paper
Oldlady by the table,
Making Sal a cape or
Some other peculiar kind of garment.
Very cold without and
Wind a shrieking, bowling,
Owls up in the orchard,
Out perhaps fowling.
Rap tap at the kitchen door,
Dorothy looks pleasant
r% Jonathan she whispers slyly,
" Rot me if it isn't,
Or some Teller that do not want to see %
Door is open, Jonathan
Why, how du ye do !"
"WeI, Dorothy, I'm putty well,
And SEEM how it's you"
Old stops his reading,
OIdslady quits her sewing;
BotHFemark to Jonathan,
-es well, now, how it's blowing.
There's going to be some tall weather yet, swow,"
salutation over
Jonathan is mum
Wishes over sundry times
That he was at hum"
@ Old folks getting sleepy,
Gin to nod the head;
Dorothy suggests that they
NF Had better go to bed,
And rodigious gringht up Jonathan physiognomy.
Old folks snoring soundly
Young folks close together
Jonathan and Dorothy
Talking bout the weather.
He Jonathan is thinking
How to pop the question;
But his heart is humping SO,
Can hardly keep his vest on
And his tongue cleaveth to the roof of his mouth
-I Dorothy looks silly,
~ Knows there's something coming;
Looks around at Jonathan,
He feels much like running.
- dearest Dorothy he says
~ And his heart beats faster
dispose that yodrand would go
Down to Pastor Castor,
And get linked in the everlasting bonds of matrmony
\ Y Il X X y **#
Years have passed away, and
Down within the valley,
Far away from city,
Streets dirty alley,
Stands little cottage
White as in March;
Jonathan aud Dorothy
Sitting on the porch,
Ind half dozen white headed youngsters around them
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

No OLD MAIDS ALLOWED, No single women
are allowed in Japan. Every man is allowed
one legal wife, and as many second wives as his
means viii permit him to support The second
wives are selected By law from the poorer classes
Of society. whose relatives are unable to main
tain them, and the children are all adopted by
the legal wife, who is the only acknowledged
mother. The old rule is therefore reversed in
Japan, where, instead Of boy not knowing his
own father, hundreds do not know their own
mother
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
d. d. Blackwell, Publisher.
e get 3 g d q L +,
iron THE PRESS.
A Boquet Of Prairie Flowers.
For Mary B., Of Rosemont, n J.
BY KATE W.

found these flowers so bright and fair,
Just peeping from the sod;
These fragrant buds, and shining leaves,
The precious gifts of God.
The prairie sod so rich, and green,
Starred Ger with treasures bright
Budding, and blooming, fair and gay,
Beneath the suns warm light.
Crimson, and white, and pink and blue;
Twinging midst tasseled grass;
Flowers of almost every hue,
gay, and beauteous
This violet with its bright, blue robe,
So pure ana modest, too;
Oh, chide not the little flower,
Which bring to you.
It reminds me Mary of time
In the bright days gone by,
When childhood's light was my brow,
And cloudless was my sky.
This rose bud with its bzSghted leaves,
Smile not nor wonder why
I've placed it midst these beauteous flowers
To wither, fade, and die.
1t calls to mind fair young girl,
gentle sister dear,
Who passed away as the blighted bud,
And left me weeping here
These treasures with their rich perfume,
And blossoms snowy white
Bloom in the all the day long,
Folding their leaves at might.
Just so with ets treasures all glowing and bright,
Which bloom in our hearts through the day;
Shedding light Ger paths for season, and then
Night comes and we lay them away.
Ks And now, fair stranger, pray accept
My flowers most humbly given,
Sweet types of those, which bloom for thee,
When Thou shalt " lioeem Heaven
Pa10. Illinois. 5ss.s
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

None but one who, like the author, has actually
sailed upon the briny deep in North river sloop,
two perilous voyages, can dream of their awful
situation
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
1t is a very nice story, uncle"

II IS very HICt SUUTy, UHCIe.
g Yes, DEAR it is one you can profit by Do
not treat person coldly because they happen
to be mechanic, lest in the end he should turn
out to be greater than YOU"
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

THERE are some men whose opposition can be
reckoped upon against everything that has not
emanated from themselves
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

Look upon every day as the whole of hte.
not merely as section, and enjoy the present,
without wishing, through haste, to spring on TO
another section now lying before thee.
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

VIRTUE should not be ashamed Of being virtu-
Gus. Spangles do not look well upon broad
cloth. 1t is best to wear your coat as if it be-
came you.
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14

A MAN can " get along" without advertising,
and so will Wagon wheel without grease-but
it goes hard
The Lambertville press. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1858-1???, 1859-07-14
g5}l / 1t s.
From the New York Mercury.]
The Thirst Fiend;
OR,
THE MARINER OF LAKE ERIE.
A stupendous Romance, Prepared for the Weakly
Haggis
BY KoRN KoBB, ESQ,

Who, aoilh salary for superior to the sllus-
tr5ous boot-mender Of the President Of the
United States, IS secured for that pa
per alone; and has let as haze
has story on the sly, for three
" cobblers and her,
ring.
Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1859-08-24


In July, 1886 was taken with ordinary summer
lnt for which negeci ed taking remedies, hoping
hat woul9 soon sop Of itself but in about three weeks
hat was unable 70 do half days work. 1 applied 10
physicians was osed FIRST with opiates next with pills
9t nitrate Of SILVER took injections OF nitrate Of silver, all
doing no gooi next took various home remedies, recon-
mended by nurses and old ladesi neither did hey do
any food Again returned 10 the Of the physicians
uslrngonts knJFn 20 tho profession, but all 20 ufp
IN May 1885, after having he disease over ten months
ienapt southern 4 pc. was recommended 10 take the
Graeienberg Dyse ery Syrup, which did In less than
tpeafg9u hours after commencing hsnse he disease
completely checked feat which seven different ph sicaus
had neen unable TO accomplish A. This time also
meneed daily a6luiions with cold waer' and ever since
used but portion OF one bottle TO accomplish this good
work, and ever since hOv els have been very regular
eyacuating n meoives once day.
FrOmmY experience, unhesifaingly pronounce it the
best Dysentery medicine ever made and would heartily
recommend its use to every with like difficulty. am
ed make his statement 10 the pui c, through gratitude
Tor the bessu4 n has conferred upon Rnd through the
hope that others Ike afflicted, may reap The benefit Of its
use. j y HART,
Office of Cleveland Plain Dealer
Having had an opportunity to test your yaluiblo medicine
for bowel complaints the Graenhorg Dysenery Syrup in
" an1 efficient relief IN such II acts like perfect
charm, and cannot doubt that when t is well known
as is merits demand It will afford relief to thousands
Pres. Board af Aldermen aud Acting Mayor N. Y.
have had on opportunity Of witnessing tho effect Of he
Graefeunerg Dysenery syrup Of bowel Complaints
especially those Of character and have hes-
talon 70 saving that admirably adaped or The cure OF
these diseases, 4. X. De FORREST, NJ. D.,
Orotsn Water Comm'r and Alderman N Y.
T For sale by Druggists and Medicine Dealers through
E7- For medicines or agencies address
h. B. KINGSLEY, Cleveland.
NngS Agent Tor Ohio.
Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1859-08-24
AYERS CHERRY PECTORAL,
FOR THE RAPID CURE OF

Coughs, Colds, Influenza, Hoarseness, Group,
Bronchitis, IRciPieRt Consumption, and for he
reLief Of COHsumPtiBe Patients ia adpanced
stages of the disease
SO wide w the field OF its usefulness and so numerous yra
the cases OF It's Gu e3 that almost every section country
abounds IN psrsons ubcy known, who have been re lev
ed from alarming aud osneeate diseases tho lungs
bY use When oce tried Is super-Tiy eyeIy h.
or edlen9 OF the kim Is ol gpparenn 10 escape obsea
ion, aud whefo lis virtues are known the pUhnc longer
hesitate what antidnta 10 employ for AID
dangerous affections of the pulmonary that nc
dent 70 our climate htie mary Inferior remedies thrust
upon the community have failed aud been discarou this
has gained tuends BY a conferred benefits the
ai cted they forget aud produced cures
meTous and too remarkable To be frgntten
Prepared by DR., j @. AVER q CO.,
Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1859-08-24
Ayers CathartiC Pills,
For all the purposes Of Family PRy8ic

Are so composed that disease within the range their
un can rrev withstand evHdo them Their penetrating
properties SEARCH and ceaue and luygorate portion
OF the human organism correcting its diseased action and
restoring s Wealthy valities As consequences Of these
properties, The nva nd who IS bowed down with pain or
physica! debility slasonished fud his health or On ergy
restored by RENE dy al once simple inviting.
Not only do they cure the every daG complaints every
body, but rso many Ormidab and dangerous diseases
The AGENT below named Is penssd To furnish gtas my
American Amunuc, containing certit Of their cures
end directions for their Ia tie following comuains:-
Costouess Heartburn Headache arising disoruered
stomach, Nausea, Indigestion, Pain and Morbid Iuacton
Of the Bowels, Fiauency Loss Of Appetite Jaundice and
other kindred complaints arising from low Of the
body Ohetructioo Of its functions
Do not be put OF bympruciped Dealers with some 9TH
pill they make The more profit on. Ask for AYERis
Pulls, and take nlthing else
Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1859-08-24
-AhaNt =@
SAN RD'S
Family CathartiC Pills,
COMPoUNDED FROM
Pure Vegetable Extracts, and put up in Glass
Cases, Air Tight, and i0iH keep ia any cli

Pure Vegetable Extracts, and PIT up IN Glass
Cases, Air Tight, and i0iA keep ia any eli.
mate.
The FAMILY CATHARTIC Pill Is a gentle but ar-
tive Nahnrtc which the proprietor has ia his nrac
iee more than twenty years.
Tbs constantly iurrnasiuFt domand from those who
have lOre used lie PILLS and tho Satisfaction which
eApisfs pa tesufd 20 heI use mas induced me place
Ihe Profession weli snew ,hat different CaihaEcs act
on different portions of the bowels.
The FAhtLY OA-ElrH HARTIC PILL
has with due rufroure this we'll esfnhlishod frf
heon compounded nom raV Of fhe nur III ffe-
table attracts which act - alike ON evorV mar Of tho
almenieW canal, and arel-I9oOD and SAFE in Oh
01aos where a Caihurtic III. luueded such ns DW-
hAN9EMENIS OF Che l-ISpOM ZACH, SLEEPl-
Ntsh. PAINS IN THE EsInACK AND LOINS
AoeIlNEMESe, PAt NIlAND SOhEN EsS OVER
Ih y WHOLE BOD VI .I-Ifrlm sudden cold, which
frequently, u neglected M end u long OF BE
YER LOSS or APPEL .IVIf ~ cREEpl NG SIN
rION OF COLD OVEUI~ lfnE BODY, hEsTi .ENS
NEs HEAD-ACHE Orl WEIGHT IN THE HEAD
an nhammatory Diseases Worms ~ Children or Adulis
Rhuumutism d Ereat puudor of the Blood and many dis
ea.ef 10 which d6sh "a heir TOO 10 mention
this advertisement Dose 4 20 d.
PRICE 80 CENTS
~ The Iivar Iurinorutur and hnmy Cathnriic Pills
Ietshedhy Drukals generally aud sold wholesale BY
S j vi SANFORD. NJ D.
Manufacturer und ProIliater
iyIdkWne 'I' 80 Broadway, New YoTk
Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1859-08-24


Hammston's 60 lege on unyirsity HeighsaTe Sgnye-
ing Railroad G.. ore des able for residences
occupied lands in Cl vel nd OF its vicinity and ut
idly incTeate in value
Terms Of sale AS follows -
Aucioneeris fees TO paid By the bidder at the time
Of the bid There will be required 20 be paid duwn at
the time Of signing the conr CT, 500 each fourteen
lots Nos 500 % 90 500 each on lots Nos 523 to $780,
h53 SOC; aud Nos tOl 10 6l6i aud S5J each the
naming l65 lots tie balance TO be paid IN v5 equal annu
n uaymens with annual it rest at cent taxes
that may be levied assessed the anl and
also the laKes Of the present year.
Parties plyilg down greater amount than required
above, viii he allowed per cent. on the excess,
Parties bidding of lots on tine viii receive
a contract from the which o Will ubligate
themselves warranty deed tor such land the
fnhment Of said contract and par pa lug IN full for
their lots wiz receive warranty deeds direct from the
clear and upquestion0ble title will he even and Il re-
gu ed abstracts Of title made BY Moses Koy aud r. T.
Backus, Esqs, vii he exhibited.
Map OF the property may now be seen at M Office ovcr
Merch1nts Bank, superior street at o. Gutter Sons
Auction Rooms Bank street., and maps will DO furnished to
bidders on the day of sale.
Tho-e desiring 20 make purchases particularly re-
qaes cd 70 visit aud examine the properly prior u he Jay
Of afle s. \. STONE.
Cleveland, August 18th 1859 aualI:d-945