The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1859-09-22
Tho QuaoKl

The QuaoKl
There are probably many peoplc non living
who remember the celebrated quatk, br
lIoubcn Nathans, who Aourish,d some forty
years since, and whose medicines the Chi
ncse Balsam Of Life" and the Celebrated
lIairinyIgowiing Lotion" made 90 much
noise a. the time, Bot few, presume have
heard the anerdote am about 10 relate con
cfrninR him.
When the "Dootors" medicines were Grs,
announced 10 the world, q respectable man ip
the country purchased one bottle of the To-
lion and another Of the balsnm, for his wife,
who had cobsumplivc cough Tor many
years standing, and was besides threatened
win the total loss Of her hair
The woman used both remedies according
20 directions, and, ~ il usual with ignorant
people In such cases thought they we're real
ly doing her vast deal ofgood. The cough
seemed 20 her 20 be going away rapidly she
"brcathed ireer," while her hair appeared 20
be coming back uFnin thicker than ever, A.,
q natural consequence, she felt very great
confidence in the medicines and when her
first 10, Of balsnm was al used, rh. sent her
husband 20 get the bottle filed again, The
d'clor asked lie man how the medicine opc.
rated.
"0h. grlndly " replied the husband my
wilc's coughs e'en-a most gone, and her hairs
al coming back ugin as fiery as ever"
"Ah," said the doctor, " that's the wes s.y
medicines alsays work. There's uo mistake
about Them. They're just what call them.
the creates, wonder Of the age s'po,e
you've no objection to give me your aGido.
ytt2'
"Oh, no." replied the maui that's juH
what my wife wants me TO do
The couple then repaired TO the mayors
office, where an affidavit was drawn up, sworn
to, and witnessed. On returning to the doc.
tors shop, the quack took up the empty bot.
tie for the purpose Of r,Glling H. uncork.
ing it. he put il to his nose aud smellcd Of il.
"Why what can this mean ?" he exclaimed.
so some astonishmcnt and then, after look
Ing ut the label, he smclIcd of il again
Why sir, this isn't balsam.' though the Ia
bel Gays 30, but the hair lotion"
"Ilar lotion or not" replied the man,
pQjRting 10 lbG hottie "ihaf'. what e,..i ~,
wiic's dreadful cough, ana the stun m inc
other bottle at home Is what made her hair
grow again"
Strange strange" repeated IN, doctor,
with puzzled coun,cnancci Il don't know
what to make oft VIII you be Kind enough
sir, just to step back aud get me the other
bottle ?-thc hair lotion, mean
The man did SO, and soon returned with
the lotion bottle. The doctor took il, and ap-
piled his nose to the mouth.
"And this" said he, els just as surely the
balsam as the other is the lotion. Don't you
think there was some mistake on your part,
sir Are YOU 0re that what was in this bot.
tie made your wifc's hair grow again P"
Just as sartin as I'm alive" replied the
man " for always turned /, oyi, while Bet.
,cS held the spoon"
The doctor sat down in a chair, and laying
a finger on his nose, seemed buried in pro-.
foumL thought.
"Ah' see" he at length exclaimed and,
IN''l'''t "li Nv il'iNh AllN AllllNl bOkllt uENlns
There, sir" said he, giving il to ,hu man
and hurrying him to the door "ars right,
siri was little bothered, that's all. Call
again when that's gone, and you shall have a
supply foe nothing
As soon as he had shut the door on his
customer, the doctor called in his "eonGden.
tial' mar from the "larboratory."
" MoShes," said he, "we've made great
mistak, in our gucss~work, after all. I've
been. studying yer hard lately, and have lust
discovered that our lotion is the stuff to cure
the consumpuons, and the 6olsau, is the besht
to make the hair grow. We mast change
the labels"
" That's unlueky," replied the man, "for
we've got four thousand bottles, two thou.
sand of each kind already 10 oead away to-
morrow"
"Ncl, vel" said the doctor, "you can
change the labels if you have time if not
send them off MS they are, -Tisnt mosh mat
ter "