Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1859-03-23

|
alone, and examined the contents. There
were, besides all the bank bills with which she
had probably been furnished for her journey,
and which, with pious care, she had packed
| into the smallest possible compass, as much
! gold as her pretty toy could carry, a tiny pearl
ring, too small to fit any fingers but hers
which | am afraid | kissed-a card with her
! name on it, and a memorandum in pretty
| hand, ''No.- Olive street, st. Louis,'' which,
| as l rightly conjectured, was the residence Of
| her cousin Jennie whose husband was ve-
| ry fortunate discovery for me. Indeed, thus
| far, had not yet found the way of the trans
! gressor hard, in external circumstances at
least, and when with her 1 forgot everything
but her grace and beauty, and my firm resolu-
tion to be no more to her than her cousin
should be; but out of that charmed presence
my conscience made me miserable.
/ am afraid l must sometimes have betray-
ed the conflicts of feeling had, by my man.
ner; but when L was reserved and ceremoniouS
With her, she always resented it, and begged
me so bewitchingly not to treat her so, and to
call her by her sweet name. ssFlorence,' that
had | dreaded as much as | longed to do it,
could not have refused her. But the con-
sciousness that l was not what she thought
me, but an imposter, of whom, after our con-
nection had ceased, and she had discovered
the deception practiced upon her, she could
think. or remember nothing that would not
cause unnlerited self-reproach and mor:ifica-
tion, all innocent and trusting she was, this
reflection, more than any other, confess, and
the knowledge of the estimation in which she
would forever hold ME, after my imposition
was discovered, agonized me, and | would
have given all possessed to own it to her
and leave her sight at once though the thought
of never seeing her more was dreadful. But
that conld not be.
At last reached st. Louis. Do say ssat
last 20 When the sight of those spires and
gables warned me that my brief dream of hap
piness was over, and that the remorseful re-
Elections | had been staving of SO long were
now to commence in earnest, the thought of
coming Punishment from Florence was dread
ful to me, and the time seemed to fly on light
ming wings as it drew nearer. She was all gay
ely, and astOnished at my sadness and absence
Of mind when near home and Jennie, and
when we entered the carriage that to con-
yey us TO our destination, | had half mind
to take cOwardly flight, rather than encoun-
ter the scorn and disappointment of those blue
eyes; but mustered courage and followed
her in, giving the address found in the port
monnaie, which, fortunately, was the right
one, to the driver.
ssAlmost home - said she, turning her
bright face towards me--we were rattling up
she street and my time was short-s'how
you be so cool and quiet 20
"Because, Miss Florence" answered ssthe
time has come in which | must confess to you
that have more right in the home to which
we are fastening, than the name by which you
address me, and that my only claim to either,
is that of an imposter and deceiver."
She turned her lovely face, wondering and
puzzled, towards me-
Thank Heaven, | did not yet read fear and
aversion in il.
s'No right! no claim 20 she repated sswhat
can you mean -
1 told her, frankly and fully the whole truth,
nearly as | have set it down here, denying
nothing, and concealing nothing, not even the
useless secret of my love for her. When the
brief recital ended. we both remained
silent, but although she had hidden her face,
could see that she trembled violently with
shame and repulsion. The sight of her dis
tress was agony TO me, and l tried to say
few words OF apology.
HYou cannot blame me or hate me, Miss
Dundard, more than hate or blame myself"
| said, 'sfor the distress have SO unwilling
ly caused you. Heaven knows that if l ac-
cepted the charge of SO much innocense and
beauty too lightly, L have heavily atoned
since, in having occasioned this suffering to
you, and my own punishment is greater than L
can bear.'
The coach stopped as spoke; she turned
towards me eagerly, her face bearing traces of
tears, and said, in low voice,
'sDo not misunderstood me, if l was so
silent.''
The coachman threw open the door, and
stood waiting. L was obliged to descend and
to assist her out. l hardly dared touch that
little hand, though it was for the last time,
but l watched her graceful figure with sad dis
tress. She was already recognized, for the
door OF the handsome house before which she
stopped was thrown open, and pretty woman
followed by ffne-looking, black-whiskered
gentleman, whom l supposed to be my name
sake, rushed down the steps. There were loud
eXclamations of astonishment and pleasure,
n nnr6i ial walnnmP
to which Florence returned very low and quiet
answers, and quickly eXtricating herself from
the confusion, presented me as 'sMr. LIE Roy,
your husbands namesake, and the gentleman
who kindly took charge of me-" | glanced
at her face to see if she was mockipg me; but
it was pale and grave. Mrs. Leroy opened
her pretty eyes widely, but was too we'll bred
to express surprise, and after introducing me
to her husband in the same terms, invited me
into the house. Hardly conscious of what l
did, or anything, except that | was still in the
presence of Florence, from whom l could not
bear o Danish myself, l followed them into
handsome parlor, where sat an old lady, who
nv conscience told me was the rheumatic aunt
l had so cruelty belied. Florence herself
presented me to this lady, who was fixture,
and unable to rise from her chair, and before
l could stammer an apology and retire, related
in her own way chow different from mine) the
mistake by which she had been placed in my
care, and the history OF our journey, In WHICH
it appeared our host, Mr.. LIE Roy, had been
fellow passenger. When she had ended, they
all crowded about me, warmly expressing their
thanks for my skindness and consideration,
TO my utter bewilderment and surprise, and
cordially invited me to remain with them, and
make the acquaintance of my namesake and
family. i detached myself from all this un-
expected kindness as soon as could, tor /
fancied | read aversion in the flushing and
paling face, and dropping eyes of Florence,
and with one last look at her, left the room.
A moment after, felt the touch of a light