The Evansville daily journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ia. [i.e. Ind.]) 1848-1862, 1859-03-16
Dead and Alive.
TCoNCLUDED.I
Hush tbere comes Mr.. Edison.

The voice was again Lucia's Dumb as /
was under the burden of that fearful stupor,
her words sent quick thrill through my
blood Guy coming Yes, heard his
we'll known footsteps at the door-on the
carpet-by my side. Perhaps he would
know that | was not dead. One by
one, as if respecting his claim to solitude,
the various persous in the room stole softly
away, leaving US alone together. Then the
restraint which had kept him silent before
so many curious eyes, gave way the great
grief OF his manly heart burst forth in sobs
and tears. He drew me into his arms with
a clasp so close that l could count every pull
satiou Of his heart. My head fell heavily
against his shoulders, the crown OF flowers
brushed his cheek. PasSionately he rained
kisses upon my lips and cheeks, and sealed
eyelids caressingly he smoothed my hair,
and wounl its shining curls about his ing-
ers, as he had been wont to do in his tender
est moments.
But no bashful flush erept into the cheeks
that always before had Redeemed beneath his
kisses no words broke over the pale lips
that never before had failed to give him
welcome If could have thrown off, even
for moment, the dead weight which para
USED me; if could have wound my arms
but once more about his neck, spoke a sin
gle word of tenderness in his ear, laid my
lips for a single instant to his would have
been content. But even that precious privi
lege was beyond my power. | could utter
no soft farewell, bestow no parting caress.
Mountains were light in comparison with
the powerless arms / yearned SO madly TO
lift =; granite more yielding than the lips
struggled so fiercely to part.
And SC | was forced to lie there like Il
weight of marble on his breast, forced to
listen to the outbursts of his wild sorrow,
and receive passively caresses that my whole
soul longed TO answer. could have torn
my heart from my bosom for single glance
into the blue eyes whose hot tears had be-
dewed my forehead. could have spurned
my hope of heaven, if so he might have
known be held living form in his embrace.
| cursed mySelf-my fate | wrestied with
the unutterable fear that cramped my heart.
prayed with vehement earnestness and des-
pairing strength. | called on God, and
flung accusations of cruelty in his holy
face | besought him to give me the life he
had half robbed me of, or else make that
bitter, uncomfortable mockery of death a
reality. l implored him to shut upon me
the gates of sense-to give me oblivion,
night, nothingness.
Then there came a revulsion. | wonder
ed if were not really dead as they said l
was. Perhaps | was TO suffer an eternity
Of just such torture as that; to crumble
into dust under the mouldy sods, yet have
no power to divide my conscious soul from
its rotting tenement of clay. Perhaps the
grass, heaving like green billows all over
| the broad earth's bosom, held each a spirit
| tormented like mine with conciousness.
! Then there came another change-the
! quiet apathy of unutterable despair. All
| the sounds of outward life became suddenly
! infinitely precious to me. As a miser might
count his gold, when he sees it slipping
| from his grasp, so | counted greedily the
| passing moments which still intervened be-
tween me and my horrible destiny All
over the house could hear the murmur OF
subdued voices, the sound of hushed foot
steps, as though had fallen into sleep
from which they feared TO waken me-
| Through the windows came the breezy
murmur of winds and leaves, the singing
of birds, the low din of village life, the
voices of children at play; how they mock
ed me
My coffin was brought in and placed upor
the parl0r table | heard the lid turned
back upon its hinges. Once more | wa
clasped closely to my lovers heart; onct
more rain of tender kisses fell upon my
face; and then he gave me into the hand
that waited to lay me in my coffin. Care
fully, very carefully, they placed my heat
on its white pillow, yet their slow, gentl
movement seemed to ne like the most inle
cent haste. I would have sold my soul TO
a moment of time, for single instant
delay of that cruel preparation.
know not how it happened, but whe
they were composing the shroud over W
limbs, a careless arm jostled the coffin. Th
heavy cover dropped down with crash an
jar; the glass lid shivercd into atoms an
IL shower of fine, sharp PARTICLES fell upo
my face. Ny flesh tingled painfully at til
; contact; drop Of blood oozed from III
temple, and trickled down upon the pillow
heard it fall and blessed nstinctively til
wound that caused it. My heart leape
4 with a thrill of rapture-0 heaven, ho'
blssful The sluggish blood leaped in IN
veins my stagnant heart throbbedi
spasm of returning life trembled throug
4 all my limbs gasped, breathed, saV
. moved Ny lips parted ! sat upright;
!, called family. Guy !"
e A rapid glance of surprise, an expresSio
= of unuttrable rapture, bound, cry, an
he was by my side trenblcd in his arm
nestled against his heart The deliciou
ness of sensation came back to me ii
bewildcring phantoms Of deathly torpOr ii'
away livcd-I laughed hystericalIy
wept tears of passionate gladness and hear
felt gratitude; aud when, few momcn
later, father, mother, sisters, friends, and Il
ore deaTcr 10 my heart than all, sto'
breathleSs wit hope and joy by my sid
there WAS not single eye that did not gli
|, ten with tears of thankSgiving-no face h
y did not shine with intense happiucss-l
voice that did not echo the ecstatc. than
ful cry Of mine-"God be praised