Saint Paul weekly Minnesotian., 1859-07-09
Burling, the New York Dun.

sacred honor
D Burlins, the New York Dun.
Ten years ago was seated in my Office a
No. u Wall street, busily driving my quill
when heard aquiet step behind me, and ther
a mild voice inquiring if had the transcript
ofa certain judgment against one j. G. o., the
protector of the great Peg wah-wah Com.
pany for selling Indian medicines. | looked
up and saw man whose twisted foot and pal
whose name or calling | knew nothing.
"Yes," replied, 81 have the transcript"
"Well, L want it," he said, "Pm going to
collect it for the creditor"
"Going to collect it =" exclaimed, "Why,
the judgment is perfectly worthless. Execu-
tons, and proceedings after judgments, and
all ordinary means of grace have long ago
been exhausted upon o. He is hopelessly
insolvent, and is besides the most adrot scamp
of swindler ever encountered"
"What's that to me?" broke out the vis-
tor in grutf, strong voice, quite different
from his first tones. perhaps you don't
know who am. Pm Burling, the man about
town. You, lawyer, and not know me =
Sheriffs are good for nothing; constables are
good for nothing; executions and creditors
bills are good for nothing. Give me the tran
script--here's the order for it'll take the
money out of him."
l swiveed around my chair and stared at
the man. "And will you be so good, Mr.. Bur-
ling" [ asked, "as to tell me what is your pa
tent plan for superseding officers and writs,
and for squeezing blood out of turnips, and
cash out Of the President of the Peg-ghe- -wah-
wah Company?
''How do it, you mean? Why dun 'em
at their houses, l dun 'em in the streets,
dun 'em in the theater, dun 'em in church,
[ catch 'em early in the morning and stick to
'em all day; follow 'em up wherever they 90;
60 to meals and eat with 'em; 60 to bed and
sleep with em; give 'em no peace night nor
day, Sunday nor week day; stick to em like
death to dead niger. A man owes debt
He won't pay it. l follow him up all the
week so he can't do any business, nor 90 to
see his sweetheart, nor walk in Broadway,
nor eat with any appetite, nor sleep without
dreaming Pm after him with the devil to help
run him down. All this won't do Very
well. When he goes to church Sunday he
Sunday do my best business then.) The
congregation rise, and he rises, takes out his
book, opens at the place, and there he finds
the bill I've stuck there, and gets so mad he
can't say 'amen.'"
"Shcriffs and Constables !" continued he.
getting loud and fierce, "will Sheriff 90 of a
Sunday morning to parsons house and fol-
low HIM to church, and walk up the broad
| aisle with him before all the congregation, and
go up the pulpit stairs close to his heels, and
slip int the pulpit after him before he can
shut the door, and take seat by side, and
get up when he gets up, and opens the
Bible, open John Jones' bill full length, and
slap it down over the chapter and verse, and
tell him: There's that bill Of horse lire, pay it
before you preach! But that's what did
and | got my money too"
And what commission did you charge ?"
FIFTY per cent" Rather strong" sug-
gested, "but still your mode of procedure
was strong. Do you often get as much as
fifty per cent?"
"When::I earnit, get it. DR.. c., of Broad
way, sent me to dun fellow who lived back
in a yard, and kept two bull dogs that he let
loose when anybody came to collect honest
debts. went at him with hore pistol in each
hand and DR.. C.'s bill in my teeth, and made
him pay up. What did Doctor C. offer me
for getting his sixty dollars ?-he offered me
one dollar. won't take it, says l. I'll pay
no more, says he. Pay me thirty dollars,
says l. Get out of my office, or I'll kick you
out says he Pay me thirty dollars, says |.
Go to hell, says he, and he licked me out of
his door and down the steps into Broadway.
goes across to the - hotel and hires a
great arm chair out of the bar-room, and takes
it across the street, and plants it on the curb
stone, right opposite DR.. C's Office door and |
lays the bill had made out on full sheet of
foolscap across my knees, hanging down so
everybody that went by could read in large,
black, sanded letters:
DOCTOR c.
To J. BURLING, Dr.
For collecting Of RICHARD Roe,
Commission, ...:...........,,S $50 90
And all the crowd kept stopping to read, so
that there was all the while two or three hun
dred people standing on the Doctors pave
ment, and reading first my bill and then his
sign, and making their jokes. l had hired the
| chair for the whole afternoon, but he hadn't
| stood this more than fifteen minutes before
he comes to tue door, and says, come here,
you damned rascal, and went in and took
thirty dollars of this money, and left the bill
receipted.
"But my friend, don't your impudent
ways often gel you into scrapes are you not
afraid some one will some day break your
head ?'
"Break whose head ~ he thundered -
didn't Col. s., of New Orleans, man that's
killed seven men in duels, when went to
dun him, at the Astor House--didn't he
grab me by the slack ofmy breechcs, and hold
me out the fifth story window, and Shake me
there above the pavement, and say, damn
you, shall lot you fall and break ynnr neck
on the stones, Or take you in, and tkick you
down stairs.
"Well, said !, anxieusly, "what did you
do then
"What die do? I said, pay me that mo-
neg! and didn't he pull me in and pay me
every cent ?"
The intensity of his manner, as he thus re-
lated his exploits, cannot be rendered on pa
per-especially when he exclaimed with clos
ed teeth, and the fingers of his round hand
clinched-''pay me that money!"
He took the transcript, and limped out. In
another day the hapless debtor, an over match
for all the regular thumb-screws of the Iva,
came in to beg piteously, would call off the
bloodhound. l told him it was the creditors
affair, not mine. Next day met Burling at
the corner of Courtland street, looking mild
and happy, and asked him how he had sue
ceeded. 81 haven't got it yet" was the re-
ply. "He hasn't found me out, but he has
just paid me five dollars to let me dine at the
= hotel, down there, without my compa-
ny. We have taken all our meals together
for the last two days, and he begins to find
his appetite fai''
Whether the S. was credited on the judg-
ment, or pocketed as personal perquisite, 1
never knew.
Garibaldi,s Wife.
Some OF the most interesting passages in
GaribaldIs life relate to his wife. He mari.
ed a lady of extraordinary oual,t;os not;,,o