The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1859-12-28
A Chapter of Whit.

discourses on wit-and illustrates the sub
ject:
Wit consists in discovering hkenesses-
judgment in detecting differences. Wit i:
like ghost, much more often talked o.
than seen. To be genuine, it should have
base of truth, applicability, otherwise il
degenerates into hippancy as, for instance
when swift says: ga very little wit is valu
ed in woman, as we are pleased with few
words spoken plain by parrot !" or when
Voltaire remarks, that "Ideas are like
boards women and young men have
none." This is arandom facetiousness, il
il deserves that term, which is equally de-
spicable for its falsehood and its facility.
Where shall we discover that rarcr spe.
| cies of wit, which, like the Wins, bears the
more clustures of sweet grapes the oftener
ii is pruned or, like the seven-m -mouthed
Nile springs the faster from the head, more
copiously it flows from the mouth
The sensations excited by wit are de.
stroyed, if it exctes the stronger emotions,
or even if il be connected with purposes of
utility and improvement. We may laugh
where it is bitter, as the Sardinians did
when they had tasted of their venomous
herbs but this is the risibility of the mus.
cles allied TO convulsions rather than to in
tellectual pleasure.
Leigh Hunt devotes forty pages of one
OF his books-and fails TO elucidate the
mystery. AT last Johnson defines wit as
"lhe faculty of associating dissimilar images
in an unusual manner" Sidney Smith, in
| his "Lectures on Moral and Philosophy" ;"
shows the fallacy of this definition, gives a
better, and breaches the startling doctrine
that wit, so far from being necessarily n
natural gift, might be studied as successful.
ly as mathematics. 1t is question if Sher-
idan was witty when staggering along, hall
tipsy, he was eyed by policeman, and ex-
claimed conicentially, "My name is Will
berforce-I am religious man-don't ex.
pose me-"
Talleyrand, when asked by lady fam.
Gus for her beauty and stupidity, how she
should rid herself of some of her trouble.
some admirers, replied
"You have only 10 open your mouth, ma
dame"
This, if witty, was also ill.natured.
Lord Chatham rebuked dishonest Chan.
celior of the Exchequer by finishing quo.
tation the latter had commenced. The de-
bale turned upon some grant of money fo
the encouragement of art, which was op
posed by the Chancellor of the Exchequer
who finished his speech against Lord Chat
hams motion saying, "Why was not thi.
ointment sold and the money given TO thu
poor 2 Chatham rose and said, "Why die
not the noble lord complete the quotation
the application being SO striking? AS ht
has shrunk from it, will finish the verse
for him-"This Judas said, not that he caret
for the poor, but because he was a thief and
carried The bag"
1t was coarse wit when Lord Byron, whc
was groaning with agony from sever
attack OF cholic, and exclaiming: "Lort
hel p me | am dying" was told by Ire
lawney, "not TO make such an internal fus.
about dying"
Luttrel tells story of Sir F. Gould, WHIT
had habit of adding the phrase "On tn,
contrary" TO everything he said; gentle
man saying to him, $50 hear, Gould yo,
eat three eggs every morning for brcakfast?'
"No," replied Sir Francis, "you are mis-
taken; on the coHtrary"-"What, the devil,
said Luttrel, "does the contrary OF eatin
mean" "Laying them. OF course !" sal
Sheridan. This was ready wit.
Rowland Hill compared a sinner TO a
osyter which opened its shell, all mouth +
take water; just as the sinner, who with hi
mouth at full stretch, took in the tide {
iniquity. Heavenly grace" he said, eva
like rump of beef-cut and come again
no meager fare, my dear brethren"
Lydia White, an English magazine wr
ter, was an invalid, and fancied herself cor
tinualy at deaths door, and used 10 invii
people to see her die. A friend, who ha
gone several times by special invitation
and come away disappointed. at last re
fused TO attend, pleading that he "coul
I not afford 10 waste so much time on a mo-
| tuary uncertainty"
Scotchmen are notoriously unable to az
preciate a joke. Sidney lSmith, wh
knows them well, says: "It requires su
gcal operation to get joke into Scotc
understanding. Their only idea of wit {
,out, as they call it, is laughing immode
ately at stated intervals"
Some Of the Irish judges of olden time
were equally dull. One, in giving his di'
tum on certain will case, said he ''lhougl
il very clear that the testator intended I
keep life interest in the estate himself"-
To it Curran frankly replied; ".Yery tru,
, my lord, very true testators generally d
secure lite interests TO themselves, but
. this case ! think your worship takes th
tcN for the deed