The national era. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1847-1860, 1859-04-28

Il
Just now, too, have succeeded in another at
tempt and quite an important success it is, so
tar as comfort is concerned. have slipped no
less than three cups of tea of my own manufac.
ture, and consider them most admirably con
cocted l will make, in time, quite superior
housewife, and expect to awaken the envy of
every old maid of my acquaintance This
bachelor life, with its insignificant cares, and
Its grand freedom from the social restraints
that clutch most men as uncomfortable as her
first pair of corsets do the liberal wasted milk.
| maid, is very pleasant to me indeed. and ]
| think, also, that it will prove beneficial Nous
rerro'aS."
This was terrible mistake, as you will pres
emily see. No man has right to cut himself
loose from the wholesome restraints of social
| requirement, for the reason that no man can
entirely rely upon his own power of selfcon-
troll.
My studies at that time were numerous. EN-.
bracing the higher French literature. from Ra
belais and Glen. Marot to Guizot a little leis.
urely reading in Eschylus and Aristophanes :;
| and pretty resolute delving in German, in
which L had advanced just far enough to read
page Of Schiller without notwithstanding
difficulty. My diary is full Of sketches for
stories and essays, of which seem to have un-
dertaken several at once, in the exuberance Of
youth, or else on the principle advocated by
Adam Clarke, that busy man cannot have too
| many irons in the fire at one time, even if he
| thrust in "tongs, shovel, and ALL" Here and
| there, too, are criticisms, now of George Her
bert's poems, now of Coleridge's Geographic
Literaria-that work which, in the relation of
plan to accomplishment, resembles a great
Switzer barn stored with the gleanings of a
pea patch; or, rather, the palace of Kublai Khan
in Xanadu With a paddIor ~ -, A. g.. -
occupants.
But wished simply to indicate to you what
| aoas at the beginning of this period of my life
| and having done so, l need not further put you
| off, for here, under date of November 18th,
my story begins, and with a poem
All, wonder if the papers that have copied
| those three stanzas, with which | shall not
| trouble you, or the people that read them, ever
| guessed in what throb of delight they were
written | remember with unpleasant distinct
| ness all the circumstances of that evening the
first line, as it was, of glowing idyllic page in
| the many-leaved volume of life.
| The ladies of the church where / had at
| tended worship from infancy had got up a
fair" with the view of aiding the vestry in
| liquidating debt which oppressed them. and
| was invited to expend with them as much as
| thought the charity required. 1t was during
|
where it was being held, that, to use one of
those forcible expressions in which the "intense
school delight, l met my fate. Never, how
ever, did any Atropos or Lachesis wear such a
smile as that with which Miss Joscian Estmere
met me on this occasion.
| had not seen Miss Estmere for nearly five
years, and my recollections of her pictured a
sprightly child full of freak and laughter, dain.
hly beautiful as willow leaf in April and as
| fragile as an early snow-drop. Shy and re-
served then, myself as was possible for one in
vested with all the gaucherie and consciousness
of hobble-de-hoy hood, she had been one of the
very few of her sex with whom could talk aud
be at ease without blush and confusion there
was such an inimitable grace in her actions,
so much innocent freedom in her manner, and
such winning tone of intimacy in her way OF
calling me Ned" and teasing me, that | felt
towards her more like brother than aught
else. did not visit her-she happened to have
other sisters, OF whom was sufficiently timid-
but our families were intimate and she herself
! had an especial fondness for my mother. used
frequently to visit her, and, though by no means
baby, for she was nearly thirteen wears old
then, had quaint childish way of sitting in her
lap, and getting herself nursed and fondled
| Thus she made one think of her continually.
and almost involuntarily, as q little Wthing Of
beauty pure fairy, not an Hairy fairy Lii.
han" but being apiritualized beyond our con.
ceptons OF humanity, with its carks, and cares.
and every-day-itudes, one fit to dwell in the
hearts of buttercups, whose food was the plum.
dered sweets Of some lazy humbe-bee, whose
drink the dew of violets.
And now, when she came forward to meet
| me, and held out her little hand-it ,cds little.
beyond any requirements of poesy-=,Ioseian
Estmere revealed herself to me as the fairy
grown up, the pameiess sprite of old time be-
come already holder of title, Queen, Titania /;
| the huttercpp-dweller blooming forth into an
unmistakable Morgiana, needing no wand to
endow her with the power of weaving Circean
spells around the soul, of giving life to the
statue, and OF making the bounding blood stand
still forever
| Let me try and draw her portrait 1t is pho
tographed plainly enough on my memory, but
| 1t Is no slight task TO reproduce the impression
IN such colors as will do her Justice.
In figure she was very slight, but so inimita-
bly, proportional that one found charm even
IN that slightness; it was her nature to be
petite, and an added inch to her stature would
have marred its rare perfection, / thought.
There was an indescribabie beauty in her hair,
IN the mellow brown Of its shadows, and it's
goid'thread CLEAN where the light touched it.
She usually wore it in four or FIVE curls, full,
and round, and dancing, for jollity," as it
were, with that dainty ripe embonpoint which
Spenser has given to the blossoms Of ala almond
tree "on top of green aelenis," round, and
graceful, aud brave, yet trembling
AT every little breath that under heaven is blownn
Those curls had a life of their own. given 10
them by reason of their beauty, fully believe:
for only under this hypothesis can / account
for the way they so merrily danced and so CO.
quettishly kissed her cheeks. Her face was
small come persons, cold critics, thought it
shade tso small, but it was her face, made after
pattern with the rest of her, and no other face
would have suited her at all. The complexion
was pure white, soft and subdued, having that
appearance ladies strive to produce with lily
white and piece of fannel-and it was over.
spread at all times with the most delicate rose
color, deepening on cheek and chin. Her
features we're not shaped in a very classic
mould, the chin being a shade too tapering,
aud the nose very piquant, The daintiness of
the mouth, with that cherry upper lip, which
had such pretty fashion of curling in pre-
tended scorn when she tossed her head, would
require the pen of Sir John Sucking to do it
justice. Her eyes, brown, soft, and liquid,
spoke to you all the time, and their language
was mingled of laughter and signs, the tinklng
laughter of silver bells at merry dancers feet.
the sigh of an infant in its MONDAY slumber
when tired of sport and play. -
She dressed richly and with great taste, hav-
ing an especial fondness for the different shades
of blue, and q remarkable aptitude in bringing
out surprising effects by their skillful contrast
or combination. She had spice of coquetry
blended with little afectation, in her manner,
aud, | think, liked to show her foot now and
then, as who would not having so lovely little
one, and exercising such exquisite taste in the