davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

o. Cabbage contains more muscle-sustain-
ing nutrlment than any other vegetable what
ever.
o. 1t is not the quantity of the meat but
the cheertulness of the guests, which makes
the feast.
o." Love in a cottage is all very we'll,
when you oscn the cottage, and have money
out at interest.
o. Most kinds of roots and barks are now
used as medicines, except cube root and the
bark of dog.
KEEP MovING Adam Clarke said he had
lived TO know that the secret of happiness was
never to allow your energies to stagnate.
o. Hon. Sherrard Clemens, of Virginia,
who was wounded in duel, expects to be able
to leave his room in about three weeks.
THE BATTLE OF LIFE -" AS much honor as
you like, my son, but as few affairs of honor as
possible. "-PdterI IamiiiaS.
o. Lord Macaulay has announced that he
will con4ine himselfin future 10 his ceset as a
historian, and take no further part in public
life.
feF-The perfume Of a thousand roses soon
dies, but the pain caused by one of their thorns
remains long after. saddened remembrance
in the midst of mirth is like that thorn among
the roses!
or Never dispute about trifes, even though
you are certain of being in the right. The
truth will come to light sooner or later, and
then your opponent will not only respect your
wisdom, bat love your meekness.
O-.Y- The gOd discoveries on the Gila river,
in Arizona, said to be very extensive, and
the rush of miners thiIher from California quite
large. The geld region lies for l60 miles on
both sides of the stream.
CE5- There is said to be man in Fairhaven.
Mass, who employs several hundred hens, for
t!eir " board aud Clothes" to lay eggs for him.
from the proceeds of whose labor he derives a
handsome support, and is enabled to lay off and
play the gentleman.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

STRIKING EFFECTS OF True CONvTRsIoN.--
short time ago, new umbrella was left by
some unknown person, at the Howard House,
kept by Mr.. Hawkins, of Upper Darby, Pa ,
without any reason being assigned for the act.
Since then Mr.. Hawkins, who keeps the Post
Office at that place, has received letter,wilh.
out any signature, stating that the writer had
three years ago, taken an umbrella from the
Howard House, and having lately embraced
religion, the act passed upon his mind SO, that
he was compelled to return new one in place
of the one taken. The letter was post. marked
Haverford. If conversion was to have the
same good influence upon all, we think zoe
should soon have lots ofnew umbrellas. Media
Advertiser.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
A PUZZLE.

To five and five and forty-fve
The first of letters add,
Twill make a thing that pleased king,
And drove a wise man mad.
A SOLUTION.
Five and five placed side by side, 81
And four and five right under, Al
A hundred make, else Cocker fibs, -
Or have made blundcr. l0t
The hundred knights of good King Lear
We promised quarters free;
His girls dsliked Clan Ferguson,
So lodged they could not be.
The King so vexed was, and perplexed,
His wife they went astray,
One Willie Shakespeare caught them up,
And wove them in play.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
p O Il Il &c a l..
" Mothers Coming"

The following poetic waif which we fine
fo4ting about on the sea of newspaperdom, will
he appreciated by many of our readers, who's,
experience has been similar 10 that of the autho
and bis Jane" 1t is prcttily written;
Jane and sat by the hearth.
Watching the embers Of the fire;
Her head was on my shoulder laid.
Iicr heart was drawn a little higher,
asked her just for one short kiss,
Nnd felt my ears so plainly hummlng-
She looked aud blushcd, aud softly said:
DO lqalck! mothers cOming!"
My arms around he: then flung,
And elt our hearts together hcatIng:
A >moihercd shrek-a htIe smack
Told of TWO souls together meeting
Years nave fled and | enjoy
Happiness beyond all summing;
kiss her now whene'er like,
And never heed her mothers coming.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
Crinoline Lover Trap.

One of the most dashng beauties of the Pa.
risian stage was followed, lately, on the Bou
levard, BY a wealthy gentleman who had long
admired her, but who, too diffident to declare
his passion, limited his addresses Gas she yer,
we'll knew,) to watching her in her daily walk.
TO and from the rehearsas at the theatre. All
OF sudden, one bright day Of October last,
this lovely promenadress became motionless in
the middle of the sidewalk-fxed as a statue,
aud with the passing crowd beginning to won
der at the "star" which had ceased to revolve.
She must be i'll! She might faint! In another
momentshe would fall! Human pity! Manly
rescue And, of course, Mr.. X. stepped up to
know whether she had not better faint with n
pair of most willing arms to receive her.
But that was not it!
With smile, with blush, with quver Of
the adorable frame, she confded to him the
secret-her crin0line was about to leave her
without leave she verify believed /! Would he
relieve her !
Never on the leaves fell do more willingly.
But how!
There were but two ways. One would be
to let her stand, till carriage could be called,
into which she could be promscuously persua-
ded. Another would be to enact a fain,ing.
scene, mys,ify the spectators by apparently
dropping senseless into his rescuing receivers,
and, being then borne to the back-stand, not IA r
of, to be thence anonymously conveyed to her
lodgings.
The latter!
And, around her, extended the willing " coat
Of arms" Gnst what she wanted for her own, )
and down went her lovely head upon the shoul.
der that didn't wish to know better, and up was
the warm form lihed and borne down The Bou.
levard and round the corner. Hack ready
door opened--ferm introduced, no matter how
(as far as history is concerned Deliverer in.
vited to jump in. too-io see, Of course, that she
was re.deIiVered at the other end of the journey.
Arrived; bell rung; dressing-mad called
pod of the painfully imprisoned pea partly
pressed apart, and oul jumped the dis-pettcoat
ed, though sufficiently. clad for.all practica
purposes lady, and ran up stairs in her nntura
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
Place for the Fancy to Revel,

Il is always delightful to have something in
the way Of stuff for dreams," to read just be-
iore YOU 90 to bed. Now here, for instance, is
a description of a spot of Natures prodisality
given. in the course Ct letter upon the TIE.
hauntepec route to California, by a correspon-
dent Of the New Orleans Bulletin:
aThey have in Paris what they call the Jar
din des Plantes--a collection, made at great
trouble and expense, Of the Tarest animals,
birds and plants-the wonder Of the world. II
Paris were situated on the banks of the Coat
z,eoaleos. as il is on the banks of the Seine,
sueh collection would certainly be uncalled-
for. Nature herself has here furnished at
hand one far more curious. Monkeys, alliga-
tors, eagles, vultures, phrr0ts, nacaws, the BAN
yan.tree ceiba, Goa, palm, and whatever else Is
rare in The animal aud vegetable kingdom alike,
are our familiar acqua aintances and hourly com.
panions. The first-named, in particular, have
welcomed us in numbers innumerable; and
what is more TO the point, every one who had a
gun, or could borrow oile, has had his pop at
them. This is the veritahle paradise of timer
mi Esaus. No sooner had we reached the
q iouth of the river than we were greeted BY q
eJuusless number of gulis and boobies the
f,rmer ffving, thousands in a flock, light and
airy as the swallow, ard fairly lighting up the
lower horizon by the eack molten of heir white
wings: little further up. by the famngo
eurlew and white crane--white as the driven
snow, and graceful as The swan--a splendid
mark in the thick dark wood for our party on
board. As wa advanced, the pileous howl Of
the monkeys was heard from the neighboring
forests; innumcrab.e focks Of chattering par.
ross and macaws greetsd US as we passed while
the lazd alIigalorlay SHINING himself all along
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
JOHN ALCOHOL.

JOHN ALCOHOL.
John Alcohol, my Joe John,
When first we were acqnaint,
I'd money in my pocket, john,
Which now | know there amt
spent it all in treating, John,
Because | loved you so.
But mark how you've treated me,
John Alchol, my Joe.
John Alcohol, my Joe John,
We've been too long together,
So you must take one road, John,
Ans | will take the other.
For we must tumble down, John,
If hand in hand we go,
Aud | will have the bill to foot,
John Alcohol, my Joe.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

HARD TINES AND TIE DECREASE OF Mann.
ACES IN BOsToN.-The times are and have bcen
tor the past year undeniably hard for the mid
ding classes IN our city, and in consequence.
say the Ir0reier, there has been in the wear
le3S, a marked decrease of the number of those
taking upon themselves the responsibilities of
mairImony. In 1851, we believe, there was a
decrease trom the previous year, and this year
we have another decrease of the number Of iu-
tentIons issued by the City Register, as COM
pared with the same period in lo57 of three
hundred and tihy-two, the number this year be-
ing twenty-five hundred and thirty four. AS
usual OF late years, majority of the applicants
were persons of foreign birth.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

the shore. This ugly Monster furnished rare
sport to our mGrEsmeu, though | believe not
one was kit. There was such grotesque awk-
wardness in his headlong plunge, to be seen no
more, so different from the light, sprngy, SIM
gle hop of the white crane, when Shot fell
near that gravity herself must have laughed
outright Aud here let me advise the traveller
who would enjoy this rare SPORT to come out
well armed, with plenty of ammunition. A
double barreied rifle of long range, is BEST as
the distance is frequently great TO either shore"
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

ECLPsEs IN 1859 There will be four eclip-
ses of the sun in 1859, viz: partial eclipse on
the ID of February, invisible here. A partial
one on the 4th of March, invisible here Ano-
ther on the 29th of July, partial, and very
small it will end at Al minutes past six, eve
ming. Another one August 9th, visible only
in the Great Southern Ocean. There will be
two ecipses of the moon; the first one on the
18th Of February, will be total. 1t will &C ~
mence at I3 minutes past four o'clock in the
morning-mIddIe SIX o'clock-and quarter be-
fore eight. The other one, August 18Th, will
not be visible.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
SELECT ARTICLES.
TOPICS TO TALK ABOUT.
Boards and Ladies.

The Courier Des Etats Unis, says the Home
Journal, tells US a spicy story Of youth of
Lyons who made painfully aware that his
strength, like Samson's, lay to his beard. This
masculine lorescence mad been allowed to at
tain its full length and beauty, when it became
expedent to unite the fortunes of two families
by marrying the wearer, Monsieur Eugene
B. 10 MademUisele Y. Proposal made
--gsnlle looked at by the lady, in presence of
her parents-iound TO be handsome-accepte ed
engagement ratified. Thus much done, the
father of Monsieur Eugene counseled him to
give the young lady one more proof of his vii.
lingness to abandon all his sing e- blessednesses
for her sake, by shaving off that very un-connu-
bal-lOoking beard.
With ono sharp razor and many sighs and
soapings the sacrifice was made. That supt rb
beard, tha growth of the very essence of juve-
nescence, was removed, and, TO the kisses of
misses there was now no bal or impediment.-
And, to be thanked for this really most immense
seli-abnegation, the shorn and shiny-iaced
youth presented himself one morning, to his
sfi4nced one. Rapture Not a bit of it =
GA the contrary Mademoisele Louise started,
grew pale, fell b.ck into her mothers arms,
and would have nothing to say to him! She
had fallen in love with him with his beard on
she had fallen out of love with the sight of the
beard of: No use to reason with her-she was
dseachanted
Tue last%ews Of III. parties was that Mon
sieur Eugene was wholly discarded-growIng
his beard once more, however, in hopes either
Of a renewal Of the previous fascination, or the
getting up of another.
Query is not the sdniration Of beard ma
taral TO woman
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
BrOadWaVIs Last

The newest fashion, says the Home Journal
for young gentlemen, at present, is--(a former
detormity of the Iadies)-sleeves la shoulder
of mutton There is but one excuse for these
abominable disfgurements of the human shape;
and that is the necessity for one sex to enlarge
where the other does not-gentlemen taking
the spare room which is above the level of cri-
nollnes. We thus pack better in public assem-.
blies, dodge, and pass aud rcpass better on the
sidewalk. Dut, urristtcally speaking, there is
a most ludcrous air of .(aisiiy given to gen.
Ileman's figure by these pu!ied-out shoulders.-
Pepper them, punch" If you please!
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
Boards at the White House.

There is parallel philosophy to the above,
10 the experiences thus narrated by the New
barsb Ners:
"a curious change Of countenance may be
noticed, this seasOn, among the multitude OF
ofiee-seekers who swarm, beleaguerlng the
White House and Infesung the department.
The proportion of bearded and mustached ind-
vduals is much less than last year. The rea-
sln is, it is san, that the President has express
el his disgust at hirsute faces. He hardly toll
crates bear, and cannot abide a mustache-
The courtiers, consequently, begin to shave -
Pathetic stories are ahoIt OF otfice-seekers who
have made heroic sacrifices of long g-chershed
beards aud musiaches, in hopes of melting the
presidential heart, aud have found, when too
lite. that even such immolation did not meet
with It's reward"
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
~ssSS

o. A witty man, who lived in constant fear
Of bailfs, having abscended, one of his ac-
qualntances asked what was the reason of lis
absence, to which he replied, Why, sir, ap-
pretended he was apprehensve of being appre-
hended, and so left 10 avoid apprehension!'
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
80 . . a.

MAN FEARS PROsPEKITY.-There is an in
stlnct in the heart Of man which makes him
fear a cloudless happiness 1t seems to him
that he owes to misfortune tithe of his life,
and that which he does not pay, bear interest, is
amassed, and largely swels debt which, soon-
er or later, he must acQuit
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
The Mulatto Novelist.

The distinguished Alexandra Dumas-his
celebrity, like his complexion, being IN black
and whIte-has addressed letter to his eighty
thousand particular friends, which, from his not
having eighty thousand leisure half.hours to
pen for each particular copy. he has sent to
Parlsian journal-saving, also, the eighteen
thousand francs of postage otherwise to be pre-
paid. He states, in this confidential letter, that
he is quite well. He has travelled fifteen hun
dred leagues in Russia, and he still proposed to
travel seventeen hundred more. After this he
hopes to return to his modest lodgings in the
rue Amsterdam a. Paris.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

INDUCEMENTS TO IMMIGRATIoN.-Som of
the Western States are holding out great in
ducements for the =" tide Of emig ria ton " to set
towards their shores. Mississippi is ahead as
tar as heard from, the Legislature having
passed a law granting divorces to all parties
who have lived separate three years.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

NUTs FOR Poor MEN.-It costs a deal of mo.
ney 10 be rich, and it is question if so much is
worth little. Afcr all, is wealth worth the
cost-tirst, in acquiring it; next, in supporting
1t; and lastly, in bearing up Under it, when you
have lost it
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
A4AoN

A Pretty Girls Waller says:
narrow compass and yet there
Dwell all that's good, and all that's fair;
Give me but what this ribbon bound,
Take all the rest the sun goes round.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
Defence of Old Bachelors.

The Savannah Macs, in answer to a diatribe
against the maie single, says:
"Ever since the days of Adam. old bach eIors
have been the butt Of everybody's rldicule -
We protest against it. There is Il vast differ.
ence between Adam and the old bachelors of
our day. Adam could Gford to marry-many
bachelors nOw-a-days cannot. What with
crinolne, tise hundred dollar shawls, diamond
bracelets, and pin money, it is no small under
taking at this age OF the world. Eve had no
chOlce-it was Adam or nobody. She had no
chance to get up ilriatlun. fer there was no
one 10 tilrt with. Seeing no other means of
tantaiIzlng her husband-a feminine peculIarity
from that day to this, she got him in a scra pc
by eating the forbidden fruit 'Od bachelors
are crminulIy guilty. are they Give 'old
bachelors The same chance Adam had, and our
word for 1t, majority OF them would put on
maIrlaIOny ia no tlme."
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06
Red B2arj and Appetite.

Gentlemen with read boards should certainly
be charged more for their dinners at hotels
The Hndoos, according to a late learned wri-
ter, picture two OF their gods, Thunar and In
dra as " characterized by flaming red boards :;
and the former consumes an OK and eight sal
mon at a meal, white the latter deyours seven
cattle :"
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

outline, though not withorta wave of her CRATE
tul fingers to her perplexed extricator.
The parties to be married, please heaven,
next week.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

C6T- snake, eight inches in length, was dis
lodged from the stomach of son of Captain
Franklin Smith, of New London, on Sunday
last The boy is fifteen years old, and has
been subject TO violent fits for the last twelve
years. In October last he was examined by a
claTvoyant from Hartford, named Read, who
impaired the first intelligence that the snake
was in the boys stomach. After several ex-
amlnations the snake was dislodged through
the bowels, and the boys health is improving.
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

UC3~ Postal arrangements in Rome are slight
ly out OF JOINT A commedmn recently applied
for letter ct the post-ohice, and was told there
was forty cents to pay for it. al can't pay
that" SAID he, for know what's in it,
Well, how much will you give !" asked the
postmaster. -Four sous is all that it is worth
to Ine," said the comedian. "Wel take it,
then, replied the postmaster, " for I've read it,
and rs only love. letter"
Smyrna times., 1859-01-06

0C1r There is both truth and poetry in the
following lines:
The penny press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1859-1860, 1859-12-12

New RAILROAD BRAKEs.--Mr. Fairbairn re-
Gently rsad q paper before the British Scientific
Association, onpthe subject of experiments to
determine the efficiency Of continuous and
self-aoting brakes, for railway trains. On this
subject It was stated that the most important
communication which had yet been made was
the report Of Tolland to the Railway Depart
msnt Of the Board Of Trade The brakes with
which Tolland expsrimentsd were, ii appears,
those which, as improvements on the common
hand brakes have commanded most success.
Similar experiments were sftsrward made on
similar brakes, which Mr.. Fairbsirn was called
onto carry out bY tho directors Of the Lsnca-
shire and Yorkshire Railway. The general
result Of all the various experiments show that
o train could bs stopped BY what are known as
Fay and Newsll's brakes, at . velocity of
twenty miles an hour, in 2s.4 yards; at forty
miles an hour, in s3.s yards; at fifty miles an
hour, in l4e.s; and at sixty miles an hour, in
3ll,5, yards. s. B4 ss-
The penny press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1859-1860, 1859-12-12
ExrRloRDmAnY MARRIAGES. AND fxrrpNAn.

EXTRAORDINARY MARRIAGES AND fNrERMAR-
RTAaEs --RELiTIoNLkss RELATIoNs.-- A few
years since q widower, Mr.. W., with two
children, both boys, entered into matrimonial
union with q widow, Mrs. r., having two
daughters. In the course Of time the husband
died, leaving two young children, little boy
and girl. The eldest son Of Mr.. w. entered
Into matrimonial union with his step mother,
Mrs. W. of course retaining tho same name.
A child was born, fine bouncing little female.
This being the state Of the csse, who can tell
the precise relation the parties have with each
other? The step-son becomes the stsp-father
TO- those who, by law, are his step sisters,
while the step.mother becomes the wife Of her
step-son. This Is plain enough, but what "a
the exact relationship Of the little babe to the
elder daughters Of Mrs. F2 Can IL be o step
sister, whom its father, the husband Of their
own mother, ID their step-brother2 It would
5eem so. . f
But the second SON Of Mr.. W. married his
step-sistsr, Miss r, and they have been blessed
with couple Of children, who would seem to
be first cousins to the first offspring Of Mrs. W.
But how can they be first cousins whom Mrs.
W. Is their grandmother? or how can they be
grand cousins when they never had q grand
father? This seems to be . sort of perplsxing
riddle that may puzzle Philadelphia lawyer
to unravel. In all this intermarriags it will
bs seen that blood relations have been avoided,
and thus the ipjunctions Of Nature have not
been violated. - Portland { (Me.) Argas, ee9
The penny press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1859-1860, 1859-12-12
p, Ft. w. and c. r. r.

PITrsBURo, December 1O.-- This morning
the District Court granted rule upon Joseph
K. Edgerton, Receiver for the Pittsburg, Fort
Wayne and Chicago Railroad, appointed by
Ohio, to show cause why an attachment should
sins Dupay in the discharge Of his .sa duties as
noon. Edgerton applied for time to answer
and sppear BY 90 counsel =. The ,, Court .:. axed
Saturday % ns1t for o. upon promise
charge Of his duties as sequestrator in Penn
sylvania until the question Of Jurisdiction Is
settled. 9.g IS. sq
Mr.. Dupuy is now in undisputsd custody Of
the road, and is operating the same.
The penny press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1859-1860, 1859-12-12

The LAST DAYS OF THE AUTHOR OF THE
"sKEroH Book" IN. P. Willis, In the Home
Journal, after giving an account Of the last
days and funeral Of Washington Irving, says:
Mr.. Irving had bssn for some time sware of
the uncertain tenure of his lifs-with the
disease at his heart which has now ended 1t so
suddenly. He fully anticipated an instan-
tansous stepping Of the futtsring pulse, and
was, therefore, careful never to be left alone
but he talked cheerfully Of dying. My COM
panion homo, after the funeral, Mr.. Grinnsll, J
was ono Of our party whom the beloved author
accompanied us on a visit to "SIeepy Hol-
low" two years ago-(a privileged day, which
I described In the Home JonrnaI at the time)--.
and he recalled to my mind the peculiar un-
hesitatingness with which Mr.. Irving pointed
QUITO US, as we drove past 1t In the carriage,
the old church which was his family burying-
ground. at Is soon to be my resting place, )"
he said, expressing It in the tone of an habitual
thought, and returning Immediately to the
lively conversation suggested by the historic
scenery We were passing through. And to
this place he was borne and laid to rest, yes
terday--"B blessed Of the Lord" we may we'll
believe, In having been "found ready"
The penny press. [volume] (Cincinnati [Ohio]) 1859-1860, 1859-12-12

SIGsoR MARIo FrGHTrNe DUEL WITH THE
MANAaSa or a MADRID THEATER. The brutal
treatment which Madame Grisi has expert
encsd at the hands Of the high-born, we'll
bred, potato-hurling, bowling audience which
frequents the Italian Opera here, has given
rise to much recrimination. Signor Mario has
naturally resented these gross and brutal
insults on q lady whose former fame should
have secured her an immunity at least from an
insult. But in his remonstrances, he has been
met by the remark, that during the hey-dsy
other prosperity, Madame Grisi disdainsd to
accept any Of the brilliant offers Of the Madrid
managers, and that she only does 50 now,
when her cracked and broken voice fails to
procure any price In the market. Many
angry discussions have arisen on this matter,
and at last they have resulted in o. duel, which
came of yesterday. The principals were
SignOr Mario and Senior San Miguel, the
director Of the Principe Thester. After sew
eral passes, and both, oombatants we're
wounded, tho ono in the face, the other in the
arm, tho seconds interfsred, and the honor of
both was declared scot free. Neither has bsen
seriously hurt; indeed, Mario would be able TO
sing again next week, were his services re-
quired, but he will decline ever again to sing
Ii this capital. @7sia i'5s ,'1' :