Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1859-01-15
a.Pye wonitlTye won itp'
"What 2" said the waiter.
" Whot?" echoed the doctors,

" ~ a "
:; I've won nitiPye won. itpt e.,.
"What /" said the waiter. .s.,
/" Whot2p echoed the doctors,
''Whdt re'cchood the wife"
Why the wager r-lton poundS?" But cast
ing his eyes around the room. and missing
the young men who !, had induced him to
watch theclQck, he asked p $50, r
=" Where are those young men whosuppcd
here lastnisht? Eh2 Quick! Where arc
they ?" E'9 F
"Thcy went away in their phcaton nearly
an hour ago, sir,'' was the rcply of the wal
ter.
The truth flashed like .thundcr-bolt thro'
his mind. They had taken his pocket book,
with twenty-one pounds therein, and had de-
camped--a couple of swindlmg sharpers,with
wit to buck them. ,[l s.. 4rrg
TAkINo rmE Darn. The Knickcrbocker is
responsible for the Sollowing: A correspond
ems in Ottawa county, Michigan, from whom
we arc always glad to hear, gives US the fol-
lowing Scene in the Mayors Court at Grand
Rapids Mayor Church presiding. Witness
called up to be sworn by the clerk:
Clcrk-Do you soemnly swcar---..
Mayor, with iignity) Stop. The wit
ness will hold up his right hand
Clerk--The man has BIO right hand, your
Honor. ,.,
Mayor, with some asperity.)-Lot him
hold up his left hand, then.
Clcrk-lIe has had the misfortune to lose
his left hand also, Tvs your Honor will per-
ceive.
Mayor, (savngcly.) )-Tell hin, so hold up
his rghtleg then a rnan cannot be sworn
in this court without holding up something.
Silence, gentlemen Our dignity must be
preserved, (Witncss sworn on ono icg,)
a PRE1"rY woman is like great truth
ola great happiness, and has no more figh,
to bundle herself under green veil, OF any
other similar abomination, than the sun
has to put on grcon $pcctaclcs,
\ SERMON in fur words on trc vanity
of earthly possessions; "Shrouas have no
pockets"
M U!d topper, CHANGING to 5yink a glass
of water, for want of something stronger,
smackcd his lips, and turncd 20 one of his
companions. "Why, it don't Sastc badly
] have no doubt It's wholesome for fcma-
les and tender chil5rcm,'
N GENTLEMAN being called upon for a
speech after dinner, said {. ] am too f2lf
fol utterance."
TnE newspapers of the Cape are ftAE Of
paragraphs giving accounts of "whaling at
home" Here Instances Of that practice
don't set reported IN thc papers, but the
boys can scil all abeut il.
----~-- ---
WHOEVER is honest, generous, cow,te-
Gus, and candid, is gentleman, whether
he be learned or unlc,rncd, rich or poor
Ir is stated as curious fact that more
money is expended annually in the United
States for cigars, than is expcnas5 fop all
the common schools in the Union,
HAST thou riches? Hast thou beauty?
Hast thou talents Hast thou dowcr?---
BE careful not to provoke tho givcr by abu-
sing the gifts,
No ONE sees the wallet on HIS own back,
though every one carries swo packs--onc be-
Tore, stuffed with the faults ofhiS ncighbors.-
the other behind filled with l.is own.
The fermentation expressed forthe lpss orour
dearest friends is often M reality for ourselves,
for we are concerned At Icing less happy, less
easy and OF less consequence than we were
before, and thus the dead enjoy tho honor of
those tears which are truly shed on account
of the living. 'ft&
Mrs. PARTINGrew s,riG She was once son.
struck, but she has no fearofit occurring again,
as she gave Ike what will do him for the rest
of his life for it.. ..,
S-------