The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1859-11-26
4 TnITEH STnn

A TOUGH STORY.
The following story is told by that re-
noHned wag, John Phnnix, OF the CalifoE-
mia Pioneer. The reader will see that tire
cords the verdict of "Coroner's Inquest"
and in other particulars bears a strong re-
sembiance to some of the tough STOKES
which have been circulated in this State and
generally believed.
DR.. Tustmaker was never regularly bred
as o physician or surgeon, but he possesses
naturally, a strong mechanical genius and
q fine appetite, and finding his teeth OF great
service in gratifying the latter propensity,
he concluded that he could do more good IN
the world and create more real happiness
! therein by putting the teeth of the inhablt-
ants in good order than in any other way, so
he became a dentist.
He was the man that first invented the
method of placing small cog wheels in the
| back teeth, for the more perfect mastlcation
of food, and he claimed to be the original
discoverer of that method Of iiiing cavities
with a kind of pusty-which becoming hard
directly causes the tooth to ache SO griey-
ously, that it has to be pulled, thereby Civ
ing the dentist two successive fees for the
same Job.
Tushmaker was one day seated in his Office
!
old fellow named Byles presented himselfto
have back tooth drawn.
The dentist seated his patient in the chair
Of torture, and opening his mouth, discov-
cred there an enormous tooth on the right
/ hard side, about as large, rs he afterwards
| expressed it s. as a small folyglot Blble.'-
Il shall have trouble with this TOOTH"
thought Tushmaker, but h. clapped on his
heaviest forceps and pulled. 1t didn't come.
Then he tried the turnscrew, exerting
his utmost strength lut the tooth wouldn't
come.
(" 90 away from here" said Tushmaker
to Ryles, sand return in week, and will
draw that tooth out for you, or you Will
know the reason why"
| Byles got up, clapped handkerchief, to
! his jaw and pu; forth.
| The dentist went to work and in three
lays he invented an instrument which be
was confident would pull anything. 1t was
combination Of the levsr, pulley, wheel
and axle, incline plane. wedge and screw
The castings were made, aud the machine
put up in the Office, over an iron chair, rem
dered perfectly stationary by rods going
down into the foundations of the granite
building.
| In week old Ryes returned; be was
clapped into the iron chair, the forteps con-
nected with the machine attached firmly to
the tooth, and Tushmaker stationed himself
in the rear, took hold Of lever four feet
long.
lie turned it slghtly-Old Byles gave q
groan, and lifted the right leg. Another
turn, another groap, the higher went Old
Byles right leg again.
"What do you raise your leg for?" asked
the doctor.
81 can, help it." said the patient.
I "WeM," said Tushmaker, L" the tooth is
bound to come now."
He turned the lever clear round, and with
sudden Jerk, and snapped Old Byles' head
clean and clear from his shoulders, leaving
a space Of four inches between the severed
parts!
They had post mortem examination
the roots of the tooth were found extending
down the right side, through the right leg,
, and turned up in two prongs directly under
the sole of the right foot.
"No wonder," said Tushmaker, "that hs
, raised bis leg"
The jury thoughtso too, but they found
the roots much decayed, and five surgeons
swearing that modification would have en-
sued in few months, Tushmaker was
! cleared on a verdict of ''justi6able homi.
eide" :.
, He was little shy of that instrumnt At
terwards bu. one day an old lady, feeble
, and faccid, came IN to have tooth drawn,
!. and thinking it would come out very easy,
Tushmaker concluded. just by way OF vsr''
ETY., to try the machine. ............
lie did so, md at the FIRST turn drew the
, old lady's skeleton completely and entirely
from her body, leaving her mass OF quives-
ing jelly in the chair (
Tushmaker took her homo in pillow.
= case, She lived seven years after that, and
: thew called her the "India Rubber Wo-
man" She had suffered terribly with the
y rheumatism, but after this occurrence never
n had anv pain in her bones. The dentist kep'
g them in glass case.
After this machine was sold to the con-
tractor Of the Boston Custom House, and il
> was found that child three year Of ag'
could by a single turn of the screw, raise
n stone weighing twenty-five tons. s..-...
!. Smaller ones were made on the same prin
q cipal, and sold to keepers Of the restaurants
They were advansageously used for boninl
turkeys. H4 .5 &ase
Ie There is no moral to this story, and it il
is possible that the circumstances may have be
?, come slightly exaggerated. o: course, thsr
l.. can be no doubt Of the truth Of the main in
cidep,s. ... -. s ..sss.~t