Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1859-06-22
HUMOROUS
no PRACTICE.
by MAJOR JONES.

CF1R
Cousin Pete had Jest cum home from
his first course in College, and he was mon
strous anxious to make everybody believe
he was a great Doctor. Uncle Josh pat
him with old Doctor Cater to learn the
practice Of medicin, for though he had
been to College four months, and had ever
so many ~lecters from the Professors, and
knowed all about the theory as he called
it, he hadn't got his hand in yet, and didn't
know much about mixin medicines and
such like. DR.. Cater tuck him into his
Office, and used to take him round to see
his patients and examin the simptems, and
sum times he used to send him by himself
TO give the prescriptions what he made for
'em, and see how his medicine operated.
Pete SOC begun to put on professional
airs, and any body to see him riding Unkle
Josh's horses TO death, or to hear him talk
ing and swellin bout the despert cases he
had on hand, would tuck him to be one of
the greatest doctors in Georgy. If he on
y had to go five hundred yards to give a
niger baby a dose of parrygorrick, he al
ways went on horseback, as hard as he
could gallop, and when he had nobody to
see, he would git on to his horse with his
s~addlebags, and go tarrin out into the coun-
try, as if somebody's life depended on his
motions. He was all the time talkin about
surgical operations and topical examina-
tons OF ded bodys, so more'n half of Uncle
Josh's niggers was fraid to 90 to sleep at
nights, for fear he'd cut 'em up and bile
the meat of their bones before mornin.-
The fact is, Pete was as perfect a specimen
of a journeyman man-killer, in the fust
stage Of his profession, as was to be seen
anywhar.
One day, while DR.. Cater was gone to
M~illedgevill, and Unkle Josh was way from
home, the overseer sent in word hat some
to- Pete hand. ED saduT0=Uags was on
his horse in no time, and away he went,
dashin outtothe plantation to see what was
the matter. In about a over here he cum
back agin, at full gallop, jumped off at the
Office door, run in and got sum medicine
and away he dashed agin as hard as hC
could tare. Several persons ax'd him wha'
was the matter, but Pete only looked wis
and sed nothin. He hadn't time to say
word, but away he went like there WASH
a mint to spare. All night he staid
the plantation; and evry body was wor
derin what upon yearth was the matte
out thar to keep him SO long, when a lit
nigger cum into Mr.. Perkinses Drug Stol
to get sum more medicin.
What's broke loose among you all o.
TO the plantation = ses Mr.. Perkins to Ne
'Oh 7 ses he, Daddy and Uncle Abral
and Sukey, and Bill, and two or thr
more Of the people, is drcdful sick
What's the matter with 'em 2
Don't no, Sar Massa Pete ses u
Mr.. Perkins tuck the letter, and af
putin on his specks he made it out.
PLANTATION, July 18th.
To Nh. PERKINS:
SR:-The dredful scurge is ia,
here, the Asyatich Collery. Six of
niggers is got it in the most maligent ii
BE sure to send the %follerin prescription
quick as possible:
X. Calumy OH
Morfene or. xiv. M
# 0 powders.
Make powders for six patients, and SC
EN- immegitly, as thar amt no time 10
lost.
In haste, PETER JONES, M. d
The old man flew round like a no
aiire, till he had got the powders all m
up; then he gin 'em to little Sampson,
told him to take EN- to the doctor as gu
rs he could.
No news was heard from the plantat
all day. EvrY body was in q state of dr
fnIeneitslncnt about the Coifery, and t
was a6nid to 90 within amiie of the pl
for fearsof ketchin the eppydemick.
The next day was Sunday, and ev,
body in Pineville was gwine to Chu
they was scared so dredful. Bout
o'clock here comes Cousin Pete, ridir
Unkle >Josh's old bald-faced horse.
slow walk, with his he'd down and a SO,
q wild look out Of his eyes. Instead
chargin up the middle of the street,
racin round the court house three or
times, like he always did, he tuck the
vatest way he could find, as if he di
want nobody to see him.
Sumthin was the matter, evry body
certain, and nothin was talked about
the Collery on Unkle Josh's plantat
and they was all ankshus to know no
had turned out.
AS soon as they could find Pete at
Doctors office, they all begun akin
bow the niggers was comm on what
the Collery.
Pete breathed monstrous hard, and
ed his eyes about like he was half OF
his senses.
EThey's died." ses he; call the med
in Georgy couldn't save 'em.n
What" ses all of 'em, adedi
many is dedp
"Fiye of 'eth," ses Pete.