The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1859-08-13


was scarcely more than Il child, but such a
glorious gifted creature. She was fifteen,
, / twenty; five years between us We We're
engaged twelve months from that time,
while going through college.
For year l had successfully resisted
my disease / called it a disease; l do
now. Remember did not let the cursed
draught alone, as should ! only kept
the appetite in wholesome suhjection. /
applied the knife, but not in the right
place, and there came disgrace and down
fall
"One night the students had a frolic.
was the foremost reveller. They tempted
me with devilish pertinacity to drink to
raised row In the melee two of the
students We're injured, and mado so much
noise that we were discovered in our re-
vels. The blows that were given were
proven upon me falsely; ! never remem-
bered that gave them. | was convicted,
expelled and published
The disgrace was overwhelming. !
tried to kill myself when | heard that An
nettcs friends had cast me off forever. A
note was put in my lnuds one day just as
/ had determined on thc means to rid my
self Of existence, 1t read thus:
=" DEAR RicuAED-I am sorry for you; l
do not believe ali they say, and surely
man is not TO be cast OF for one false step.
Come TO Aunt Martha's this afternoon.-
They have forbidden me 10 receive you at
the house but will see you there.
Yours, as ever, ANNETTE
"Oh, sir, that made my heart leap into
my throat with Joy and grief She did not
know that this was far from my first false
step
Dear angel she had confidence in me-,
and wanted 10 comfort me Besides, She
was young, impulsivc, loving At three in
the afternoon | went to the place She had
designated. 1t was a poor, plain house. for
her Aunt Martha was far from rich, and a
| sat in the little parlor, Annette came III
and made it light
Her low dear Richard was the
sweetest music | had ever heard. Then
as caught her to my bosom, Size pressed
back my hair with her loving fingers, and
said with a smile that seemed angelic,
: They cant make me believe YOU wicked,
dear Richard while look Oh tllat face
Her voice inspired me; her perfect
faith for the time elevated my manhood.
never Happen again-that | would not
die. but make myself worthy Of her.
( "'You do not believe all they say of
me. then? ! asked.
No. Dick the beautiful eyes were
raised lovingly TO mine. No, Dick, |
won't believe it, though they had made
You appear guiiticr than what YOU are
/ You know, Dick, ,he adhed, a. if to apo
! logic. to soften the apparent reproof, II is
very wicked TO do so at all
/ -. But did not iniure the students,
said evasively Il distinEt:yely saw Hal
/ Burt and ice White strike at them II IS
all done through jealousy
IL knew it: told them 20 at home
said Annette, triumphantIy. Said !.
Dick is smart, and the foremost Of bis
class and they hate him for il. They viii
{ iriur- l.ie f=--ei name - They can Eui ne
yer in my estimation.
."God bless you, my love was all ]
could say. There Were tears in my eyes
and promises in my heart, Oh She was
beautiful so good that afternoon! can
see the dear eyes that have made shed
many bitter tears looking at me now with
the same soft, loving, pleading. yet trusting
glance, can see the dear red lips with
my name upon them.
We parted. ] 10 20 to my disgraccd
home, to meet cold, averted looks; She TO
be sheltered and pcttcd and loved by all
who knew hey. Ny father with incredible
exertion. procured me a situation III the
service. 1t was the worst thing that could
have been done for me, though. as there
was soon TO be fighting, promotion-n i
livcI-was possible, nay almost certain
But temptation was on that vessel, on deck
and in her cabin took leave of Annette
and went TO sea Once on the ocean, |
forgot prudence love, Annette, all things
pure and good, in my devotion to the cup.
There WAS wine Oh the table. \ dashing
young officer who took TO me had suppl
4
/ liquors. | was always 20 Il certain extent,
drunk Our destination was Mexico
There, for the exhibition of drunken va
lor was appointed second lieutenant-
before had been third. All, sir, lived a
gay life. dare not tell, or even think of
my cxcesses-thcy were horrible. Once
again | was promoted, and came home
with the honors Of a first lieutenant thick
upon me Then ! was lionizcd. An
nette : friends forgot my weakness. The
glitter of epaulettcs filed their vision
They could not see the dlunkard IN uni
form. | went to A"nctt.s home as l
listed.
One night ! called upon her, l had
been drinking freely, aud was not sensible
of my situation, or | would have shot my
self before | had ventured in her pre-
sencc She never looked more beautiful.
knew distinctly / remember her wild
look Of affright-llcr hands pushing me
frantically from her-her cries Of alright
finally her lock ing herself in her room,
which made fruitless attempts to enter,
then leaving the house with all the doors
open. and then comes a blank.
The next morning dawned upon me in
the chamber of friend. As l looked up
with aching brain, noble face bent over
me-thc face of one who had been a fellow
! collegian, and who was stud-ing then for
the ministry.
Il asked him fecbly where was.
'' Horace and found you PROSTATE in
the street few rods from here. You
were utterly helpless. We lifted you up
against your most imprccating struggles;
YOU cursed Us with every breath, but we
finally brought you here and here, you
have slept till now. 1t wants a quarter to
eleven. | closed the blinds that you
might sleep it Off
a did not ask him what he meant by
it. was ashamed; too much ashamed to
look at him.
~ limited at the effects of southern fe
yer, but from under my nearly closed lids
saw something like sneer on his face.
lie sat down by my bedside, and he
plead with me for an hour For Gods
sake, he beSought me TO Dfeak from tnls
ruinous habit He held up the flame of
hell till shuddercd. Then he spoke of
Annette, and knew by the tremor of his
lips, the huskiness of his voice, that he,
too, loved my darling had suspected it
before, but now | was certain, and it rOus-
ed the widest feelings ofjealousy. Madly
! | boasted of her unconquerable attach
ment fool that was With a coarse, un-
skillful hand barred his own heart to his
view, till he shrunk from me in agony
| Then | arose, forgetting all gratitude for
for his great favor in bearing me- senseless,
disgusting as was, from the clutches of