The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1859-11-12
ON FEMALES GROWING OLD.
fro BIZ READ IN PRIVATE

/
The following venturous essay on the
most delicate of subjects is from Chamber.
Edinburg journal:
"Gro~ing old. A time We talk Of, and
jest or moralize over, but find almost I'M
possible to realize-st least to ourselves.
In others, we can see its approach clearer
yet even then We are slow to recognize it
What, Miss So -and-so looking old, did
you say Impossible: she 10 quite young a
person; only year older than land
that would make her just--Bless me! l
am forgetting how time goes on. Yes
with q faint depreciation which truth for
bids you to contradict, and politeness to
notice-sl suppose We are neither Of us 90
young as We used to be-
"Without doubt, it 10 trying crisis in a
woman's life-s single woman's particularly
when she begins to suspect she is not 50
young ~ she used TO be- that after crying
'Wolf' ever since the respectable maturity
OF seventeen-as some young ladies are
fond of doing to the extreme amusement of
friends-the grim wolf, old age, is actually
showing his teeth in the distance !; and no
courteous blindness on the part Of these
said friends, no alarmed Indifference on her
own, can neutralize the fact that he 10, if
still far of, in sight. And, however charm
ingly poetical he may appear to sweet four.
teen and half, writes melancholy verses
about Il wish were again chid,' or merry
Extraordinarily, who preserves in silver
paper my first gray hair;' old age, viewed
as near approaching reality, is-quite
another thing.
"To feel that you have had your fair half
at least of the ordinary term of years al
lotted to mortals; that you have no right
to expect to be any hsndsomer, or stronger,
or happier than you are now; that you have
climbed to the summit Of life, whence the
next step must necessarily be decadence !;
ay, though you do not feel it-thongh the
air may be as fresh, and the view as grand
still you know that it is 80. Slower or
faster, you are going down hill. To those
who 60 hand. hand
"'And sleep thegther 1T the foot
it may be a safer and sweeter descent; bu.
| am writing for those who have to make
the descent alone.
"lt is not a pleasant descent at the be.
ginning. When you find at parties tha.
you arc not asked to dance as much as for
merly, and your partners are chiefly stout,
midd!e-aged gentlemen, and slim lads who
blush terribly, and require great deal of
drawing out; when you are cleared and
patronized by stylish young cbits, who were
10 their cradles when you were a grown
woman, or when some boy, who was your
plaything in peticoats, has the impertinencs
to look over your head, bearded and grand,
or even to consult you on his love affairs
when you find your acquaintance delicately
abstaining from the term 'old msid,' in
your presence, or Immediately qualifying
it by an eager panegyric on the solitary sis
terhood; when servants address you as
Ma'am' instead of Miss; > and if you are at
a>}rtout and comfortable looking, strange
sbopkeepers persist in making out your
bills to Mrs. Blank, and pressing upon your
notices toys and perambulators.
"Rather trying, too, when, in speaking
of yourself as a 'girP-which, from long
habit, you unwittihgly do-you detect
covert smile on the face Of your interlocu-
tor; or, led by chance excitement to de-
port yourself in m untra-youthful manner.
some instinct warns y ou that you are making
yourself ridiculous; or, catching in some
strange ooking- glass the face that you are
too familiar with to notice much ordinarily,
YOU suddenly become aware that it is not
Young face; that it will never be q young face
again; that it will gradually altar, until the
known facs of your girlbocd, plain or pret.
ty, loved or dislikcd, admired or despised,
will have altogether vanished-nay is van
ished: look as you will, you cannot see it
any moro.
'.There is no denying the fact-and it
ought to silence many an ill natured remark
upon mutton dressed lamb fashion,
young ladies Of a certain age,' and the
like-that with most people the passing
from maturity to middle age is 30 gradual
as to be almost imperceptible to the indi-
vidual concerned. 1t is very difficult for
woman to recognize that she is growing
old and to many-nay, to all, more or less
this recognition cannot but be fraught
with considerable pain. Even the most
frivolous are somewhat to be pitied, when,
not conducting themselves as pdssees, be-
cause they really do not think 1t, they ex-
pose themselves to all manner of mscon-
structions BY still determinedly grasping
that fair scepter of youth, which they never
suspect is now the merest rag of sovereign
ty'-sovereignty deposed.
"Nor can the most sensible weman fair
ly put aside her youth, all it has enjoyed,
or lost, or missed-its hopes and interests,
omissions and commissions, doings and
suffering-satis6ed that it is hencefoIth to
be considered entirely as a thing gone by
Young people forget this rs completely as
they forget that they themselves may one
day experience the same, or they would not
be so ready to laugh at even the most fool
ish of those foolish old virgins who deems
herself juvenile long after everybody else
has ceased to share in the pleasing delusion,
and thereby makes both useless and ridicu-
lous that season of early autumn which
ought to be the most peaceful, abundant,
safe, and sacred time in a woman's whole
existence. They would not, with the pro-
verbal harsh judgment Of youth, scorn so
cruelty those poor little ahsurdities, Of
which the unlucky person who INDUCES
therein is probably quite unaware-merely
dresses as she has always done, and carries
on the harmless coquetries and minduieries
of her teens unconscious how exceedingly
ludicrous they appear to lady of-say
forty! Yet in this sort of exhibition, which
society too often sees and enjoys, any hon.
est heart cannot but often feel that Of all
the actors engaged in it, the one who plays
the least Objectionable and disgraceful part
is she who only makes fool of herself:
"Yet why should she doit? Why cling
so desperately to the youth that will not
stay and which, after all; is not such a
very precious or even happy thing? Why
give herself such world of trouble to deny
or conceal her exact age, when half her
acquaintance must either know it or guess
it, or be supremely Indifferent about it ?
Why appear dressed-undressed, cynic.
would say-after the pattern of her niece,
the belle Of the ball; annoying the eye with
beauty either half withered, or long over.
blown, and which in its prime would have
been all the lovelier for more concealment
"In this matter of dress, word or two
There are two styles of costume which Ia.
dies past their premiere jeunesse are mos
prone to fall into !; one hardly knows whict
is the worst. Perhaps, though It is the
ultra -iuvenile-auch A. the insane juxta
position of yellow skin and white tarla
tame, or the anomalous sdorniug of grs!
hair with artificial flowers. 1t may b
questioned whether at any age beyont
| t~entv n hall costume is really becoming