The weekly hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington, Iowa) 1858-1860, 1859-07-30

Point, written by"v. p. W. which ne fou
IN the keokuk journal, and when We indulp
ousselve4s in lev feeble commentaries M
What We though to bc production Of Or
disious literary and seientiic ioterest. a
krspsuee knew bat single drawback. Who v
t". r. w" Having long ago made no O
mind that "Junius" vas either Sir Philip Franc
Or the devil, We have encountered ano,h
\ Eeblem quite sufficient to embitter the remain
DER Of life. We were. ON Gre TO know vi
q vas that passed the evening with Mr. Justi,
Roosevelt, chatsed with Miss Harriet Ian
shook bands with the Swedish Minister, en-
oraced Frank Wuddell. beat Gen. Scott
whist. dined with Gov. Kemble, and then wro,
long letter to say what be had fer dinner.
Our readers will be pleased to learn that s.V, /
w. 10 not mythical Dersonage, that he live
moves, eats and embraces, in reality and not
| mere romance. A cOncatenaiion. OF vonderfl
circumstances has given US the name q
toe person who won rubber OF Ger
| Scott, and reduced Mr.. Kenbles stock of cho,c
old wines. For be it known that this sceatifi
gentleman, when he saw our comments upon hi
letter. which he did at cleveland, where he wa
visiting somebody else, was thrown into a ,ripi
exudation, and forthwith sent TO this metropoli
letter which will be found IN another place =
II now appears that w. P. w." when be wsot,
MS genuine sparkler Of an epistie, did not meaI
70 have it published in the Keokuk Journal. O.
any other journal, it being merely intended. I,
soiAce the lonely hours OF q Keokuk friend, ant
70 aseuage his griet At the absence OF Nv" Blu
his friend was not selfish. He could not tolerate
the thoughs that SO much brilancy, shrew dnes,
and genial gossip might be lost to the world
could not resist the temptation of letting the
people OF che good city OF Keokuk know tina,
he had friend who had beat Gen. Scott a,
whist; could not lock up in bis writing desk
facts so important to the world. He took the
responsibility OF publishing the letter, being we
suppose, "very much OF gentleman" OF
your supertne sort, in comparison with whom,
men only commonly well bred are mere clowns.
We congratulate w. P. "" upon the remark
able good breeding o. his eliminate snd valued
friend" We see how much Importance is TO be
attached TO his criticism Of men and manners.
when his bosom compani0n--the man with
whom he may be said to sleep-the recipient of
bis personal condolences, takes his letters to tie
newspapers and publishes them, signature and
all-exposes their careless freedom of express
sion" to the cold aud wthering glance OF the
unieeiing critic, and sends the chastity written
down the tide of immortality.
There is nice, gentlemanly friend for you'll
That is the style OF man with which it pleases
w. r "" when bereaved of his Frank Wud.
dell" to associate!
The polished "V." will do US the justice to
believe that, not moving in the lofty circles
Of refined society, which he adorns, we could
not be supposed to know, when we found bis
etter in the columns Of the newspaper, that
il was there against his desire or without his
sanction. We poor devils OF the lower strata
ire rather crupuluous about,reportinga what we
1sve to eat when we are asked to dinner, but
We did not know that it might not be q rigor-
'usly correct proceeding the part of gentle
nan who associates so iamiliarly with Mr.. John
Van Buren, takes tea with Mr.. Justice ROoseve
lob-nobs with sMiss Harriet Lane, embraces
frank Wuddell, shakes hands with the Swedish
Minister, liquors with Kerr of North Carolina,
mokes with Page of Mississippi, eats mutton
nd wines with Mr.. Gov. Kemble, and beats
scott at whist, thereby "d-by annoying"
hat veteran brave. As MIR. VS. friend, although
he beet OF ielows-we know he must be good
elbow becase he is VS. ''vaued" friend, al
hough the precise amount of his value is not
tated-as this Orson Of Valentine V. 10 so
deficient in good breeding, there are three
0urces which V. eau pursue Imprimis: He
an break the golden cords which bind him to
is well-beloved friend, although the stern duty
nay lscerate those interior portions Of his
hysica! system which, since they were saturat.
d and smOothed by Gov. kemble's Madeira,
ave been in such . sweetly solaced condition.
secondly, he can break his "valued" friends
ead. Thirdly, be can summon his faithful
oniidant TO the CORY arbitrament of the duellO.
)r, il he has constitutional scruples in reference
o murder or monOmachy, and desires to live
o eat another dinner upon another day, with
lr. kemble, or some other gentleman who
lives AS a gentleman ought to hive" we advise
i'm to purchase and to present to his ''valued
riend, cheap copy OF some standard work on
OF those invaluable little manuals
'hieh may be had for a couple ot dimes at
ny street stall, and each OF which declares |
pom its title page, that It is the humane legacy
I the dying DOfssy to an unpublished world
is evident that V. must either kill, cut, or
orrect hls friend, who "quite inadvertently"
ublisbes private letters. Not moving ourselves |
the upper circles, we are not qualiGhd to give !
dvce; but, if pressed for our opinion, We |
lould strongly discountenance in this case an |
ppeal to the God ot Battles, and for this rea- |
,n, which will certainly commend itself to q
entleman ~nO has good appetite aud is |
artial to dining out. Suppose that in moment |
inde nation, Mr.. V. should insert that pointed |
tensil called bowie knife in the abdominal
.gions of his fathless friend Very good. He
My spoils the dinner.delights Of bis ex-Achates.
ut suppose Achates, also in moment of in |
ignation, should make large hole in the
ieestive arrangements OF Eneas V. Suppose,
rat at the moment of his sinking in this
erfOrated condition to the ground, an ex-
ress should arrive from Gov. kembie bearing
summons to a second dinuer more delightful
Ian the first Or, supposeithas DR.. Buchanan.
nder sanction Of the broad seal of the United |
tates Of America should just then command
i'm to 60 sOmewhere, and eat something for the |
ublic good Shade of Brillat-Savsrin! What
What effectual, useful ,:or important
ming could Y. accomplish with great gaping |
ole IN his ventricular apparatus Why, Gov. |
embe's prettiest spread" though it might |
,mpt would but torture his appetite, because,
Mess caulked in way not yet discovered by
.ar-eyed science, VS. stomach could no more |!
old the tid-bits and the vine, thancould the |
iant's after he had been reduced by rOgush |
ack into giving himset that suicidal slash,
hich was to relieve him OF press of pud-
ing, and did that and something more. V. |
lould keep himself always in tip top condition, |
nd. SO to speak, sleep upon his spoon, his knife,
is fork. Al a moment of public danger, when |
se destinies Of the West Point Academy might |
ang upon his appetite what could he do with
OMACO TluuIeu IKE U RreteF NhiuIy IoT
i'm would steam the sayory soup vaiDly for
i'm would the carver select judicious inter-
fixtures Of snowy fat and ruddy lean vainly
,r him would the white wines sparkle and the
ID wines glow; vsinly to him would the atten.
ant "Jeems" offer the smoking pudding or the
leasing pie. He could only point to his dilapi-
ated duodenum, aud shake his head with sad
gni6cance, exclaiming:
"see what rent the envicus oasca made"
No, We could not have Lieutenant-General
"a 1--WE suppose he must be at least l4euten.
nt-GeneraD capacity for trencher service
npaired; for who knows how many private
.tters OF his descriptive OF his feats in dining,
lay yet be published in the newspapers,
artculArly. if he joins the placid forgiveness OF
10 lamb TO the appetite Of the olher not tebe-
amed animal, and still makes his 'intimste
nd valued friend" the confidential recipient OF
10 roasting, tossting, broiing. boiling, baking
nd bibaiory experiences! We urge this, be.
ause we want to know who is victor shcn next
:. p. v. plays cards with Gen. Scott; and we
hond also like to know If Gov. Kemble's din
els are always as good as that OF which Y. p.
:. did eat, and was filed with vic,uals and
separation, We do not despair Of obtaining
,r him an invitation to the Apician banquets OF
le White House luxurious feasts which
las smoke not for Us, aud smell not in onr
lain republican nostrils. But the West Point