The Buchanan County guardian. (Independence, Buchanan County, Iowa) 1858-1864, 1859-11-10
Guilty but Drunk.

Guilty but Drunk.
Many years ago, while the State of
Georgia was still in its infancy, an eccen-
trio creature, named Brown, was one OF
its circuit judges. He was man of con-
siderable ability, of inflexible integrity,
and much beloved and respected by all
the legal profession, but had common
fault. His social qualities would lead
him, despite his judgment, into frequent
excesses. In travelling his circuit, it
was his almost invariable habit, the night
before opening the court, to get " COM
fortably corned," by means of appliances
common upon such occasions. If he
couldn't succeed while operating upon
his own hook, the members of the bar
would turn in and help him.
1t was in the spring OF the year, TAX
ing his wife-a model of woman in her
way-in the old fashioned, but strong
carry al" Z" that he journeyed some for
ty miles, and reached village where
"court was to be opened the next day
1t was along in the evening of Sunday
that he arrived at the place, and took up
quarters, with relation Of his better
half" by whom the presence of an Off
cial dignitary was considered quite an
honor. After supper, Judge Brown
strolled over to the only tavern in town,
where he found many old friends, called
to the place, like himself, on important
professional business, and who were pro-
perly glad to meet him.
" Gentlemen" said the Judge, I" It's
quite long time since we have enjoyed
a glass together-let us take drink all
around. Of course Sterritt addressing
the landlord you have better liquor than
you had the last time we were here-the
stuff you had then was not fit to give a
dog"
Sterritt who had charge Of the house,
pretended that everything was right, and
so they went to work. 1t is unnecessary
to enlarge upon drinking bout in a
country tavern-it will quite answer our
purpose to state that somewhere in the
region of midnight the Jud sc wended his
very devious way towards his temporary
home. About the time he was leaving,
however, some young barristers, fond of
practical and not much afraid of
the bench, transferred all the silver
spoons of Sterrtt's into the Judges coat
pocket.
1t was eight O'Clock on Monday morn
ing when the Judge rose. Having in
dulged in the exercises Of ablution and
abstentation, and partaken of refresh
ing breakfast, he went to his room to
prepare himself for the duties of the day.
Well, Polly said he to his wife,
| am much better than l expected to
feel after the frolic Of last night
Ah, Judge, said she, reproachfully,
you are getting too old-you ought to
leave off such business
'Ah, Polly, what's the use of talk
ing
1t was at this precise instant Of time
that the Judge. having put on his over
coat, was proceeding, according to his
usual custom, to give his wife parting
kiss, that he happened, in thrusting his
hand into his pockets, TO lay hold of Ster-
ritt's spoons. He jerked them out. With
an expression of horror almost indescrib-
able, he exclaimed
My God. Polly!
What on earth's the matter, Judge o.
Just look at these spoons =
Dear me, where dye get them p
Get theme Don't you see the init
ials on them ?'-extending them toward
her. stole them.
Stole them. Judge?'
Yes, stole them y
My dear husband. it can't be posi-
BILE !! from whom .
From Sterritt, over there his name
is on them =
Good heavens how could it happen?'
l know very well. Polly--I was very
drunk when came home. wasn't %
Why, Judge, you know your old
habits when you get among those law
yers.'
But | was very drunk p
Yes, you was
Was | remarkably drunk when 60.
home, Mrs. Brown .
Yes. Judge. drunk as fool. and for