Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1859-04-08
THE PROFESSOR oN THE GREAT

b CITIES.
The witty writer Of the Professor at the
breskfast Table, in the April number of the
Atlantic Monthly, expresses his mind freely ON
several OF our great cities. Boston comes first
OF course, and thus:
BOsroS
Boston is the brain of it, a. e., the New
orid') and has been any time these hundred
years That's all claim for orBOstOn,-that it is
The thinking centre of the continent. and there
lore OF the planet
- And the grand emporium of modesty-
said the divinity student, a little mischievouslv
on, don talk TO me Of modesty answered
Little Boston,-Im past that.--There isn't a
thing that was ever said OF done in Boston. from
pitching the tea overheard to the last ecelesi-
astlcal lie II tore into tatters and flung into the
dock that wasn't thought very indelicate by
some tool or tyrant or bigot, and all the entrails
Of commercial and spiritual conservatism arc
twisted into cOlics often as this reyolutio, ,arv
brain Of ours has a fit of thinking como oyer II
NO sr,-show me any other place that is or
was since the megalOsaurus has died out. where
wealth and social influence are 30 fairly divi-
ded between the stationary and the progressive
classes Show me any other place where every
otner drawing room Is not chamber Of the IE-
qulsiuOns, with papas and mammas for inausi-
tors,-and the cold shoulder instead of the
dry psn and the gradual fire. the punishment
Of 'heresy!'"
BALTIMORE
- We think Baltimore is pretty civilized
Kind oi village, said the young MaryIander,
good natnredly. But suppose you can't for
give Ut for always keeping n little ahead of Bos-
ton IN point OF numbers, tell the truth now
Are We not the centre of something?"
An, indeed, to be sure you are. You are
the gastronomic metropolis of the Union Why
don you put n canvass back duck on the ton
Of the Washington column Why don't Won
get that lady off from Battle Monument and
plant terrapln in her place. Why will Won
ask for other glories when you have soft crabs
No, sir, you live too well to think rs hard as we
do IN Boston Logic comes to us with the salt
hSh Of Cape Ann: rhetoric is born of the beans
Of Beverly; but you if you open your mouths to
speak nature stops them with a fat oyster or
OnerS slice Of the breast of your divine bird
and sllenees all your aspirations
PHILADELPHIA.
And what OfPhiladelphia Of 2'' said the Mary
lander.
oh, Philadelphia Waterworks. killed nv
the Croton and COchituate; Ben Franklin, bOr-
rcwed from Boston; David Rittenhouse. made
an orrery; Benz amin Rush. made a medical sys-
tem' both interesting to antiquarians; great Red
rlVer raft OF medical students, spontaneous gen.
Grafton Of professors to match; more widely
known through the Moyamensing hose com
Pany and the Wistar parties; for geological sec
ton OF social strata, go to the club. A good
place TO live in, first rate market Upton peach-
: e.. What do we know about Philadelphia, ex-
eePt the engine companies are always shooting
each Other.'
THE METROPOLIS
And what do you say to Ne York?'-asked
the kOh-i-nOOr.
"A greatcity sir, ,''-replied Little Boston
"a very opulent, splendid city. A point of
transit OF much that is remarkable, and for per-
manence Of much that is respectable A crea,
mOney-centre- San Francisco with the mines
above ground and some of 'em under the side
walks have seen next to nothing QraHdiosc
out Of New York In all our cities 1t makes 'em
5 all look Paltry and petty. Has many elements
n sSl clvlilLatIon. May stop where Venice did,
spthOugh, tor aught we know. The order of its
Development Is just this: wealth; architecture;
upholstery; painting; sculpture. Printing as
mechanical art lust rs Nicholas JcnsOn and
the Aldi- who were scholars too. made Venice
renowned for it. Journalism which il the ac-
cloent OF business and crowded populations, in
great perfection. Venice got as far as Titan
and Paul Ncronesc and NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
ISIS mark you, magnificent on the flesh and
blood side Of Art,-but look over to Florence
and see who lie in Santa Croce. and ask out of
whose loins Dante sprung
Oh, yes to be sure, Venice built her Ducal
Palace. and her Church of ST. Mark, and her
Casa Gro. and the rest of her golden houses.
and enIce had great pictures and good music
and Venice had Golden Book i'm which all
the large taxpayers had their names written:
but all that did not make Venice the brain Of
Italy.
Il tell you what. SIR, with all these magni6
cent appliances Of civilization il is time We be-
gan 10 hear something from the jeMHeSSe dOTee
whose names are on the Golden Book Of Our
sumPtuouS, splendid marble palaced Venice
something IN the higher walk of literature
something In the councils of the nation. Plen-
" Of art L grant you sir; now. then. for vast
libraries. and for mighty scholars and thinkers
ami staieSmen--hye for every Boston one a5thc
population Il to ours ten to one more properly
IN Tirturc of centraliIing attraction as the al
legged metropolis, and not call our people pro-
Niheits, ana nave TO come begging US To write
The lives OF HendTick Hudson and Governor
Morris
The Little gentleman was on his hobby ex-
slung his own city at the expense of every other
Plsce | don't suppose he had been in either
"f the cities he had been talking about. was
just going to say something to sober him down
II could, when the young Marylander spoke
up.
Come now, he said. what the use of the ,e
, comparisons Didn't hear this gentleman
saying the other day that every American owns
all America? Ii you have really got more
brains IN Boston than other folks. as you seem
=. 10 think. who hates you for it, except a pack of
3 kerlobling fools IfIl like Broadway better than
Washington street, what then! / own them
bfo9th hs much as any body owns either. am
an american, and wherever look up and see
the stars and stripes overhead, that is home to
me, ...|..sF
He spoke, and looked mp as If he heard the
emoiaEoned folds cracking over him in the
breeze. We all looked up inyoluntarily, rs if
We should see the national flag by so doing
The sight Of the dingy ceiling and the gas Il <
igres depending therefrom dispelled the illu-
zion. -
KINDNESS MULTIPLIED,-Timothy Staple
ton, Hoosac Falls, near Troy, n. Y, arrived in
New York on Wednesday a ternoon. in advance
OF family party on route for Sidney Australia,
70 buy passage tickets for them, including him
o self A Z" runner proposed to take him TO an
once where he could be accommodated. and in
passing up Cedar street remarked, as he noticed
his NeIl-6lled travelling bag, Just leave your
baggage here and you can get it return 4"
So they went into Charles Bon's Farmers
Hotel" No l4l, and, after requesting perinis
sion. Stapleton left the travelling bag. Before
reaching the ticket Office they were in search
If, he suddenly grew wise and left his runner
companion, despite all persuasion to do other
vase, went on To n regular Office and saved his
bacon" Then he called for his baggage; bar
tender asked fifty cents for trouble; wOuldn 1
paw ID, bur finally consented. when 81 30 was