The Buchanan County guardian. (Independence, Buchanan County, Iowa) 1858-1864, 1859-06-02

compass, as much gold AS the petty toy
could carry. a tiny pearl ring, too small
to fit any fingers but hers-which | an
afraid kissed--a card with her name on
it, and memorandum in pretty hand
:" No. - Olive Street, st. Louis, I" which
as l rightly conjectured, was the resi-
dence of the Cousin Jenny whose hus.
band | was a very fortunate discovery
for me. Indeed, so far had not found
the way of the transgressor hard in ex-
ternal circumstances, at least, and when
with her | forgot everything except her
grace and beauty, and my firm resolution
to be to her no more nor less than her
cousin should be but out of that charm
ed presence my conscience made me mis-
erable.
| l am afraid / must sometimes have be-
trayed the conflicts of feeling l had, by
my manner but when | was reserved
and ceremonious with her, she always
resented it, ard begged me SO bewitch-
ingly not to treat her so, and to call her
by her sweet name Florence" that had
| dreaded as much as | longed to do it,
| could not have refused her. But the
consciousness that was not what she
thought me, but an impostor, of whom,
after our connection had ceased, and she
had discovered the deception practiced
upon her, she could remember nothing
that would not cause her unmerited self
reproach and modification, all inn ocent
and trusting as she was, this reflection
more than any other, l confess, and the
knowledge Of the estimation in which
she would forever hold me, after my i'm
position was discovered, agonized me,
and | would have given all l possessed
TO own it to her, and leave her sight at
once, though the thought of never see-
ing her more was dreadful. But that
could moi be.
AT last We reached st. Louis. Do /
say at last - When the sight of the
spires and gables warned me that my
brief dream Of happiness was over, and
that the remorseless reflections l had
been staving off SO long were now to
commence in earnest, and the thought
of the coming banishment of Florence
was dreadful to me, and the time seemed
to fly on lightning wings as it drew near
er. She was all gayety and astonishment
at my sadness and absence Of mind when
SO near home and Jenny, and when we
entered the carriage that was to convey
us to our destination l had half mind
to take cowardly fight, rather than en-
counter the scorn and disappointment of
those blue eyes but l mustered up
courage and followed her in, giving the
address found in the port monnaie, which
fortunately was the right one, to the
driver.
Almost home !" said she, turning her
bright face towards me--we were rafting
up the street, and my answer was short /;
how can you be so quiet and cool ?''
Because, Miss Florence" l answer
ed, /" the time has come in which / must
confess to you that l have no more right
in the home to which we are fastening,
than to the name by which you address
me, and my only claim to either is that
Of an impostor and deceiver''
She turned her lovely face, wondering
and puzzled, towards me- Thank Heav-
en-, | did not yet read fear and aversion
in it.
"No right no claim !'' she repeated
"what can you mean 20
l told her frankly and fully the whole
truth, nearly as | have set it down here,
denying nothing. concealing nothing,
not even the useless secret of my love
for her. When the brief recital was
ended. we both remained silent, but al
though she had hidden her face, | could
see that she trembled violently with
shame and repulsion. The sight of her
distress was agony to me, and | tried to
say few last words of apology
"You cannot blame or hate me, Miss
Dundard, more than l blame and hate
myself" l said, " for the distress have
so unwillingly caused you. Heaven
knows that if | accepted the charge of
so much innocence and beauty so light
ly, have heavily atoned since, in hav-
ing occasioned this suffering to you, and
my own punishment is greater than /
can bear
The coach stopped as l spoke, she
turned towards me eagerly, her face
bearing traces Of tears, and said in low
voice