Muscatine weekly journal. [volume] (Muscatine, Iowa) 185?-1890, 1859-06-17
THE LOVER DISGUISED;
OR, LOVE WORKS WONDERS.
A SKETCH FROM LIFE.

~ My freud Tom has 4 natural af1ec'
zion Cor dirt, or rather dirt has a natu,
raj affection for Tom. 1t is to hin
what gold was to Midas whatever hi
touches turns to dirt. No matter how
white the cravat-no matter how i'm
maculatc the vest, the moment that il
comes within the sphere of Toms in
hucnce, its wilderness is gone-it is i'm.
maculatc no lo' ger. Dogs, sweeps
and lamplightcrs never pass him with
out leaving upon his dress uncquivocal
marks Of their presence. Once, and
only once, l saw him cross the street
without cncountering the wheels of i
carriage. l opened my mouth to con-
graduate him, and before could offer
one word it was filled with mud. The
careless blockhcad lay at my feet, full
length in the gutter. At my earnest
solicitation, he purchased suit of pre-
cisely mud color. TWAS capital idea
lie crossed the street three times he
walked half a mile, and returned, in
appearance, at least, unscathed. Tho
thing was unprecedented. True, he
was welcomed by the atfcctionate ca
resscs of dog that had been enjoying
the GOODNESS of u neighborins horse
pond true, he received a shower bath
from the wheels Of an omnibus. But,
to plaster mud on Toms new coat,
was to "gild refined gold"-to paint
the lily. "Tom will be a neat man
yet" l said, as witnessed the success
of my plan.
In about a half an hour it was my
fate to meet u gentleman with seven
stripes of green paint on his back it
was my friend Tom he had been
leaning on some newly painted window
blinds.
His shoe-black declares that he cam,
see ''no use in backing his boots when
they never remain black )" and his
washerwoman, with very proper e.
gard for her own reputation, has been
compelled to discard him, not from any
ill-will, but, as she declared with up
lifted haLds, eff any one should ask
inc if I washed MIR. Smiths clothes,
what could l tell them 2" But there
were very few things in this world with
which u ON could so easily dispense as
the services Of washerwoman.
Having 10 other amusement, one
morning [ strolledoyer to TOMS room.
As | assembled the stairs, | heard his
voice in very decided tone, "But it
must be done, and so there is an end
to it!''
Greatly" was the reply, "anything
within the limits of possibility, but to
make a coat in ten hours-I will prom
use anything in the world, but l really
fear shall be unable to pe,J0rm."
elf double your price would be any
object"
"Certainly sir, if you insist upon it
certainly. l will put every man in my
shop upon it; it shall be done in time.
Good morning, SIR"
The door opened and fellow with
shears and measures passed out. What
could Tom be doing with a tailor!
"Just the man I wanted to see,"
he exclaimed. 81 require your advice
upon very important affair which of
these crayats do you think most be
coming?'' and he spread before me
some half-a- dozen, Of every hue and
fashion. .I..-
CHOW, what in the name Of all that
is wonderful does all this mean, Tom :?
A fancy ball, is it? You have chosen
an excellent disguise; your nearest
friends will never know you. But you
cannot support the character if you
had taken that Of chimney-sweep,
now-but that would have been tao
natural. Tell me truly, Tom, what
does all this mean!'' ...
"Why, the fact is, Frank" passing
a hand through his hair, redolent with
macas sar-"I have concluded-I think
! shall be little more neat in future.
You doubtless remember the good ad-
vice you gave me some time since; it
has had an excellent effect, I assure
you D
Now, it SO happened, that Of all the
good advice had ever given Tom, this
was the very first instance in which he
had seen fit to follow it. So l could
not attribute the metamorphosis Of my
friend to my eloquence. Who but a
woman ever changed sloven to fop ?
"Pray, where are you going this
evening"" continued, "that you must
have coat SO suddenly"
- Going ?-nowhere in particular.
I had, indeed, some notion Of calling
on my old friend, Mr.. Murray no
harm in that, l hope ?"
Conviction began to flash upon me.
"Your old friend, Mr.. Murray; and
his young niece, Miss Julia, has no
share in your visit, I suppose? l
heard that she arrived in town last
night"
''Now, upon my word, Frank, you
mistake me entirely. l did not know
that she was in town last night-when
THAT is, when II did not know
anything about it.'' ..
''ALd so you were there last night,
too! Really this is getting along
bravely."
"Why, the fact is, Frank, you must
know everything. called last evening,
to see Murray on some business, about
that real estate you know. l had no
idea Of meeting a woman there, more
than a boa-constrictor-my beard was
three days old-my collar ditto-and
the rest Of my dress in excellent keep
ing. I became engaged in conversa-