The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1859-10-26
VARIETIES.
Good humor is the health Of the soul
sadness it's pioson.

sadness its pioson. Is
| A well read fool is the most pestilent
Of blockheads, his learning is fail which
he knows not how to handle, and with
which be breaks his neighbours Sims as
/ well as his own. Keep a fellow Of this
description at arms length, as you value
the integrity of your bones.
Rochefoucauld
Ofan unpopular painter it was said that
his only good traits were his portraits
A lady's invitation -Cir-cum-ambulate
/ An omnibus horse has about an equal
experience Of wheel and wo
Old aen give good advice to console
themselves for being no longer in posi-
tion to givesba examples.
/ Two Dutchmen, who boasted of their
skill in speaking the English language,
offered the following as specimen The
one asked the other" Did UNI rain to-mor-
row. To which his learned friend re-
piled, Yaw it vas" a
Those who have not yet visited Niagara
Falls would do we'll to make haste, fer an
Exchange says that Table Rock, once so
conspicuous at Niagara Falls, las quite
disappeared, and the face of Goat or LII
mar Island has also much retreated. These
facts justify the presumption started by a
practical geologist that in ten, or fifteen
thousand years hence the rocky ledge
which now causes the falls will be worn
away, and the water will descend in a &C.
RIGS Of rapids, similar to those which char
acterize the ST. Lawrence
The following slanderous paragraph
goes unrebuked:
A wag has invented new telegraph.
He proposes to place line Of women fifty
steps apart, and commit the news to the
first of them as a secret.
Many anecdotes Of Henry H. Worthing-
ton, the veteran Mississippi editor who
died on the 18th instant are yet in vogue.
Here is one which exhibits his intense
political ardor: After the overwhelming
defeat of Mr.. Van Buren, in the Presiden-
tial canvass Of 1910, an acquaintance met
him. Good morning, Mr.. Worthington,"
said he, chow are your family?" "Gone
to h--li, sirlall gone to h-li sir p re-
Iplied Mr.. a., who being very deaf thought
4 his friend alluded to the incoming election
lreturns.
Mississippi could boast Of no more ami.
able gentleman, better citizen, reader
writer.
A man down East has invented a ma
chine torenovate old bachelors Out of
a good sized, fat, greasy old bachelor, he
can make quitea decent young man, and
and have enough left to make two small
puppies, apair of leather breeches, and
"a small kettle Of soft soap.
| "a love.sick swain, in order more fully
to ascertain the mind Of his lady-love,
closed a letter with the following verse:
lyon was a dog, and was q hog,
| A rootiug away in the yard,
If the old man should say
Drive th,t hog away,
Would you worry or bite very hard?"
@Why, Bridget" said her mistress, (who
wished to rally the girl, for the amuse-
ment Of the company, upon the fantastic
ornamenting of a huge pie,) "did you do
that !? You are quite an artist. How did
you do it2" "lndeed, mum, it was myself
that did it" replied Bridget. "Isn't it
pretty, mum? did it with your false
teeth, mum p
Morliere was asked the reason why, in
certain countries, a king may assume a
crown at fourteen years of age, and cam
not marry before eighteen. ct isl said
Moliere "because3it is more difficult to
rule a wife than kingdom
An exchange says, little child had
made a stool. no two of the legs of which
were Of a length. While trying in vain
to make it stand upon the floor, he locked
into his mothers face and asked, Does
God see everythingw A"Yes, my child
'Well," replied the son, Il guess he will
laugh when be sees this stool.p - 81
A judgment before evidence is judg.
mont without evidence J. Bentham