Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1859-12-15
CContinued.l

CContnued.l
Tuesddy.-No l shall never come to an I'M
derstandng of my Husband and his People,
for when his whole heart seemeth open to me,
and l think to read it like any book the dark
Mist-Cloud suddenly cometh, shutting me
out as if l were Child, too vain and foolish
to be trusted. 1t may be true but l am, new
ertheless, the same Margaret Reade he won
from Ryalside, and whom, if he hodeth that
notion of her, he should have left there. He
came not TO his rest, last night, until long after
Midnight and when | awoke, this morning,
he was already dressed for journeying l
sprang up suddenly, asking whittier he was
going and what kept him so late from his bed,
and he answered hastily "To Bradford on
business, affecting not to hear the rest. And
when l would have repeated it, and told him
of Uncle's Letter, the sight OF his set brow and
close lips took from me all heart. l was driv-
en- to keep my joy to myself; so the shadow
of Disappointment is Oh it already. would
not seek his notice second time, and let him
ride away in silence; but could not bide the
House so taking old Lawaine Whose liking
for me- Stranger, as Mother Lake always
hath it, is something marvellous to the House
hold) for Company, went out on the Moors,
to walk off, if might be, my exceeding heavi-
ness of heart. But the black frosts had touch
ed them, and the pale bars of sunshine, stream
ing over them, did only light up their drear-
ness, and | weared my feet in vain
l sat me down by a stunted Thorn, and,
looking in the eyes Of the old Dog, wondered
why 1 could not win the Human Love l so
deorly craved, as readily as the dumb Beasts.
Truly, the love of Dog is not to be held in
light esteem, and, think, made old Lawaine
comprehend as much but | doubt if l deserve
even this, sor when | reached the House, | re-
piled to some word of Esther's in such cross
peevish way, as did make her look at me with
establishment, and | burst out weeping,
piece OF weakness that did bring me under
the searching eyes of Mother Lake. Esther
began to Soothe me and offer some excuse, as
is her wont, but Mrs. Lake said very quietly,
and with strange kindness, l thought
Don't help TO weaken her more, Child.
She is Woman and hath Woman's Desti.
ny, Pain and Sorrow, and heavness of Heart,
before her, and the sooner she learns the idle
ness of Tears to lift the Curse, the better
From Eve downward, all have the Lesson to
learn. But these long struggling walks are
improper for you, Child. 1t is time you used
more judgement. Now, 60 and take some
restW
Truly, it is time. knew it long ago, when
l commenced this weary Diary But, God
help me, it seems as if had lost all that made
Life to be desired all that was worthy of Love
in myself and care not whether | live or
die.
Evening.-Mr. Lake hath come, and with
him MIR. Sharswoode. Here | might as well
stop, so little do | know of the Doings of the
pf brrcb P,,t
the heavy heart, like unto the merry one,
musttind outlet somewhere, and this old Diary
is, at the least, discreet They came late, Philip
and Richard so late that | had wearied of
waiting, and was about to seek my rest when
they rode into the court. l have watched so
much for Philip, atterly, in this lonely house,
that l do think l can tell the sound Of Sa-
chem's hoofs anywhere, aud | was so glad,
now, that l ran straightway down stairs to
greet them, or to greet my Husband, without
thought of who his company might be.
think Philip was minded to chide me, at
first, for this haste and forgetfulness, for as he
turned at the sound of my step, | could see,
even by the dim light which old Giles carried
that his face was even more stern and pale
than in the morning; but, the next moment
even, before | could speak, he drew me to
him almost fiercey and kissed my lips in
sudden hearty fashion as if he would, with
strong will, put down all that comes between
us to trouble him. These outbreaks from his
ordinary manner do mind me Of what Mr.. Sci.
den did say, that day, about the burning
mountains away in the frozen islands of the
North. 1t did warm my Heart, that kiss, |
confese though | could not but blush at such
unseemly behavior, even when l knew his
company to be Richard.
The latter had the goodness not to notice it,
in good sooth. He had barely time to greet
me when Philip broke in quickly 1t lacks
yet good hour OF our Mothers hour of rest;
does your purpose still hold to see her tonight,
Richard"
overly, since your wisdom will have her
troubled at all, it matters not how soon. Time
was when English gentlemen could manage
their own affairs without the interference Of
women but new Times, new Customs, new
Faith, new Manners! Is it not SO, fair Mis-
tress Margaret
1t did seem to me that there was something
strange in Richards voice, something that did
mind me of the discordant strain | was wont
to draw from cousin Elizabeth Spinnet, when
| ventured to touch it and would fan have
seen his face, but the light was too dim, and
all speech was kept back by my Husband, who
said hurriedly but in that way of his which
admitted of no parley go to your room,
now, Margaret, the hour and the place are un-
seemly"
His look as met it, more than the words,
did mind me of the disorder of my hair,
which had let down for the night, and forgot
to put up, in my great joy at their coming:
and did not stay for another look. Never
theess, am advised to think If men would
take the trouble to look into woman's heart
more, their judgment would be nearer the
mark. Somehow, cannot help thinking OF
the first time we met, and with what kindly
nd Mr. GbarswOn1p covered