The Kanzas news., 1859-01-08
HOW I CANE TO BE MARRIED
CHAPTER !

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thet 9most men are mortal" The remark
is too general to give offence, even to the
most sensitive; but. for my own part. am
not sensitive on this point. belong to the
great majority who al once admit their NOR
tality, and plead guilty to all its weaknesses.
Now. chief among these is the disposition
to undervalue what we possess ourselves,
and TO overrate and covet that which is pos-
sessed by others. In my case. this tenden-
ey is very marked fact which I incline
to attribute in part to my oyerweening mod
esty / am vain neither of myself nor any :
thing that is mine. and highly appreciate
others and everything that is theirs. For
example. though by no means defornled
person, I have not limb or feature with
which / am content; while if by taking
thought could add a cubit to my stature,
I should do s.,. In this state of mind,
am constantly envying their personnel. /
want this mans eye, that ones nose, the
third ones chest, and so on.
Now, in one sense, this is an amiable
feeling, for it makes me look upon every
person meet when compared with myself)
as singularly fortunate but it is in no sense
a comfortable feeling, for it keeps me in
state of chronic dissatisfaction, and makes
me the most dyspeptic and dismal of men.
Il is all very well for Harriet Winslow to
ask
''Why this longing; why forever signing
For the far-off, unattaned and dim 7''
but how is body to help it? And as for
her benevolent attempts at consolation thus
"other hands may grasp the field and forest.
Proud Proprietors in PomP may shine;
IQrr<x EI Z. lox-o 8 4I..o-
Thou art wealthier-all the world is thine
it is a piece of pure sophistry. I have been
a fervent adorer of one thing and another all
my life {; but I do not yet find ''aIl the
world" mine, nor any considerable portion
of 1t; and so long as t'other hands" con-
tinue to .sgrasp" it, this state of things is
likely to last2 Moreover, if all the world
were mine, shouldn't care anything about
it; ike Alexander, I should sigh for new
worlds. These poets, after all, are poor
hands at consolation. Emerson, unable to
get possession of the land about him,
(which is owned by a parcel of farmers,
congraIulates himself that he owns the Gland
scape !'' There is some sense in this, come
TO think of it, for, at any rate, nobody else
owns it : but what are we to think of Charles
Mackay, who sings:
"Cleon hath thousand acres,
Ne'er one have l;
But the poorer of the twain
Is Cieon, and not 20
Do you believe it? Does he believe it
himself? Offer him an acre or two, and
see! Suppose I should sing,
Harper hath q million dollars,
Nary red have |;
But the poorer of the twain
Is Harper, and not
would you think me in earnest? Or, if you
did would you give me my price for this ar
ticle Never
But truce with criticism, and let us
come to the point. Once more, then, l own
up. that am not only mortal, but mortal.
ly envious. l want everything within my
reach or. rather, everything beyond my
reach. Any desired object that comes with
in that tempting distance I begin to depre-
ciate, and once in my possession / am apt
to desplse it. Hence I am always neglect
ing the s'bird in the hand" and running a
wild-goose chase (in defiance of the old
proveib) after 1.-THE two in the bush;'' and
this brings me to my story, for but for this
weakness, should have now been an old
bachelor, and (but don't send this number
of the magazine to my house y my wife
would probably have been an old maid
Let me go on in my own discoursive way,
and yon shall know all about it.