Delaware inquirer. (Wilmington, Del.) 1859-18??, 1859-12-31
KEEPING UP APPEARANCES.

ny ALFRED cRowouiLL.
The keeping up Of appearances is disease
and peculiar to one individual or one class.
All the world is always trying to keep mp ap-
pearances. 1t is the means BY which every
body deceives everybody, and, more curious
still, constantly deceives himself.
When any unfortunate individual fails in the
attempt to keep up appearances, all the rest of
the world flies at him and tears him piecemeal.
He is dragged before judges appointed for the
purpose, in court solely appropriated to try
such fools and there placed in confinement,
that he may not have tile opportunity of again
disgracing the world by failing in his attempt
to keep up appearances nine tenths of his
Judges and detractors all the while trembling
on the verge of the same destructive fall yet
they smile on, as il in the greatest state of Sc
curity lavishing their means with troubled
souls, because they mustkeep up appearances
The world is always straining and overreach-
ing itself, in all its grades, to be the one above
it. Every one wishes to be thought something,
more than he or she really is Thus you see
the maid of all work, or family drudge, hunger
for her holiday; and when it arrives, fag her.
self to death by wandering through the streets
in her best things-many degrees too fine
with veil and boa which she must put in
her pocket before she returns home; merely
for the aeeting vanity of being taken for some
body who did not know tile shape of mop or
scrubbing brush.
MANY q man who is Obliged 10 keep up ap
pearances by dressing well-which is very
expensive part of the delusion-must cut down
his expenses in other quarters consequently
his lodging loses in responsibility of situation
what his coat gains in texture and cut. To
have his boots ard hat always in an undenia-
BILE state he must put up with second floor
back; and if insane enough TO indulge in
taglioni with velvet facings and a Lama shawl,
suppers must be represented by hard biscuits.
The cheap locality in which this kind of
single appearance lives is of very little conse-
quence to him. His cautious maneuyres to
get out of it, from his nervous apprehension Of
being seen by the world that really cares moth
ing about him, are amusing and droll. He
pops out suddenly with hurried glance around
to see that the coast is cleari the door is slam
med to with a nervous twitch, and as If he
placed the trap upon the domestic demon in
possession of his secret But before emerging
from the end of the street into the world, he
looks about as if he had missed his way looks
up at the name of the street, when, seeing all
right, he starts ont upon the broad pavement,
defying the world to say or believe that he had
cleaned his own boots of unexceptionable
make.
The keeping up ofappearanee is in the main
a drollery, prompted by vanity, pride and folly;
yet in many cases It is thing of much pathos
and through its workings are shown some OF
the most beautiful feelings of our nature. Who
can see unmoyed the STRIPPING issuing from his
widowed mothers door to seek the drudgery
of his office, that promises him, ere long, re-
muneration that will enable him to place that
fond mother in comfort--see his nicely folded
collar white as snow, falling over the scrupu-
lousy brushed jacket; and the old silk hand
kerchef tied on by her careful hand to guard
against the early morning cold. In neat
paper packet, he bears his frugal dinner, I'M
knowing that his mother makes her tea do for
dinner and all, that she may have comforta-
bic meal for her darling boy on his return !
thus touching on the very verge of starvation
that he may keep up appearances.
The clerk of narrow stipend who alone did
brilliantly is taken in by appearances, until he
F finds 1t impossible to disentangle himself from
the entertainments of blue eyes and ringlets, and
in that moment, which most men have in their
4. "a; IN, tha nld no
pie, cunning in keeping up appearances, who
accepts him accordingly, and he soon n@rries
a young lady with a very nice voice, and a
charming performer on the pianoforte, that IS
left behind her for her younger sisters to prac-
tise upon.
Here begins his struggle to keep up appear
auces. He must cake and wine his friends, or
they would think him'as poor as he is. ITO
be poor and seem so, is the devil" say the old
people, and he commits all sorts OF follies ac-
cordingly. In the course of time the first child
is christened-ev everybody comes. This is about
the last scintilation. Common sense comes
to the young couple, and they find that they
must pull up, or they will soon be unable to
keep up appearances at all. Now commences
his hard work. Hats will get shabby, clothes
will get seedy, boots are not everlasting; yet
it wont do for the nattiest man in the Office ia
lose his place in the scale. The young wife
struggles, and does without herne silk dress
that he may have a new coat she cuts and
eontrives to furbsh up last years bonnet, and
with the aid of new ribband, people who are
not too prying might really take it fora. bonnet
just sent home. Her songs and her vanite'
are all forgotten in her anxiety that they shoule
keep up appearances. If asked to sing, sht
stumbles for want of practice, and seldom sing
except to the baby, who is no great judge
She follows her husband to the door, on his
morning departure, with the brush in her han'
to take off the last bit of flue, or have anothe
brush at his hat; and he walks out looking a
least five hundred a year, if not more and NJ
one, to look at him, would think that he was
man likely to tremble at n water-rate, for n
Keeps up appearances uncommonly well.