The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1859-01-01
A BuRLEsoUE on MoSEYEp MEN.

A BURLESQUE on MONEYED MEN.
One of the amusing letters purporting to
come from NIohamed Pasha published in the
Erening Post, has the following hit at the
"Merchant Princess Of New York: ,.
"H. was born at uuddletown, Connecticut,
in the year 1902. BY the time he was ten
years old (and very old, indeed, he was at
that time Of life) he had made one hundred
and sixty FIVE bargains, barters and dickers
in shoe strings, peg-tops and jack knives
and had amassed the sum Of FIVE dollars and
ffty-three cents. At the age Of eleven, he
entered the store Of Grab & ketchum,
in his native town, aud continued therein as
Il clerk until he had reached the age of fifteen
years, and accumulated the sum of two hun
dred and five dollars and thirty-two cents.
Investing this amount in potatoes and dried
pumpkins, he set sail in Stonington sloop
for New York, and with his entire posses.
sions landed ut Fulton Market in the year
1877.
Since that time he has passed through the
several professions of vegetable purvcyor,
fish vcnder, general merchant, bank presi-
dent, and solid man, and is now q magnate
and millionaire. He was never indicted for
stealing, or accused Of infdslity. lIo was
never troubled with an ultra idea, never had
an unselfsh aspiration, never went out Of his
way to do charitable act, never bothered
himself with romance, sentiment, or art,
never spoke two consecutive sentences in a
grammatical manner, never looked at the
! stars over his head nor the flowers under his
feet. lie is some sixty six years of age, bald,
bilious, and not especially amiable. lie has
just built himself u large brick house, We
neered with brown stone, and furnished it
with satinwood and brocHtelle, and hung the
walls with paintings, evidently by very old,
and, indeed, quite decrepit masters, and set
up in a carriage. lie has achieved IL fine So
| cial position, and is now considered a most
| desirable match for any virgin in New York"
AYEAR OF PANIC.
| The cause of the commercial panic Of
1878 is still an unsolved problem. Speak
ing of it the New York Economist says SIN
! the United States the whole number of fail
ures brought about demand for 'instant
settlement inaugurated by the New York
banks, which contracted $27 ,O00, 900 in six
weeks, did not much exceed those of ordinary
years, and included no heavy banking insti-
| tuition except that Of the Ohio Life and
Trust. which was owing to individual folly,
to use no harsher name, rather than to gen
eral causes. Many rotten firms went down
like that Of Lawrence, Stone d Co., whose
debts are S5,0O0,OOO. In England three
rotten banks collapsed under most disgrace
full circumstances; but what are these cases
propOrtioned to the vast commerce Of the two
countries! France and Northern Europe
were badly scared for fear that the United
States We're not going to pay. They have
now recovered their tone and their money!"
Speaking of the ulterior effects of the pan.
ic and the stoppage OF credit and Of business,
the same authority says:
"The fears were that the people could
not pay. As whole, it may be said, that
all have paid. Ifthe cause Of the panic was
groundleSs, Its consequences have been but
too real, since it suspended the production
of wealth, and by keeping idle the thousands
who should have been employed, has made
difference of 500, 100000 in the wealth of
the United States. H. cotton alone the pro-
duct!on fell off l0O,OO0,OOO, and the dis
charged hands lived on their savings. In
every branch Of industry-shoes, hardware,
hats, clothing, mines, ships, houses, roads
similar results manifested themselves. Per-
sons who produce nothing must reduce their
luxuries and consume less, and traffic shrunk
up, us Il matter of course, and the country
at the end Of the year was poorer by an i'm
mense sum of money. These were the re-
suits of panic making and gambling for a
fall in stocks in 1857. Companies were
swindlcd for the purpose of causing a fall in
the stocks, and the fact of the swindle was
betrayed by the perpetrators to u cOnfcder-
ate press, which sounded the alarm, while it
participated in the resulting profit and clori-
fed itself as prophet. Six months of such
operations produced in New York that alarm
which in diating circles spread over the
commercial word, paralyzing industry and
leaving capital unemployed at low rates.
MONSTER NUGGET.
! \ gold nugget has recently been found Mt
Bol!urts, Australia. weighing 1900 ounces,
Troy weight and estimated in value at $5j,-
600. 1t was found in an old claim. at 100
feet below the surface, and within l50yards
Of where Alb. nugget had been found
short time before. The fortunate finders
were company Of Cornish miners, twenty
| four in number. A Melbourne papers thus
describes the event.
CAT half past seven o'clock last (Wedncs-
dav) evening the men at work in the Red
Hill Gold Mining Company's claim on the
Black liill road, came upon the monster.
| After half an hours hard work, they sue
cccded in getting it to the surface, when
the joyful intelligence was Immediately
communicated to all the shareholders who
were within reach.
"To describe the appearance Of this mass
Of gold, so as to convey an accurate impress
sion of the figure it presents to the eye, al
most surpasses our powers. A huge, mis-
shapen, irregular lump of apparently mol
ten gold, waterworn and rounded upon
each Of the numberless edges presented by
u surface completely, and more or less deep
ly, honey combcd. Its total length is
about twenty inches, its greatest breadth
about twelve inches, and its greatest depth
about eight inches. At one end it is thick
and solid, approaching a cube of about ten
by seven inches, and this tapers away for
about fourteen inches Of its length, until
narrow neck Of not more than four inches
in circumference, joins it to n sort of minor
projection, oval in shape, about twelve in
ches wide, six inches deep and six inches
long in the direction of its entire length
The mass looks as though it had been form
ed by fusion in the matrix, and fallen, as
lump of dough might be imagined to dispose
itself, on bed of irregular gravel. In col
or, it is as bright yellow as Ballart gold
usually is, and is remarkably puSe TO, so
large II. mass but beyond its enormous
size, which creates only feeling Of wonder
and astonishment, the welcome nugget has
nothing peculiar in its conformation"
CO" The spiritual intercourse is certainly
cnlarsing. spirit not long since waited
on Judge Edmonds, and wanted him to take
a drink through mn earthly medium. Tn
Pawtucket Gazette relates the following
incident of spiritual communication which
quite exceeds the Judges story:
"An enthusiastic believer was relating to
a skeptic the spiritual performances to
which he could testify, and among other
things said that on certain occasion the
spirit of his wife, who had been dead several
years, returned to him, and seating herself
upon his knee, put her arm around him, md
kissed him as much to his qualification as
she used to when living.
.'.You do not mean to say" remarked the
.keptic, ",hat the spirit Of your wife really
embraced and kissed vou?" .l. .Hn ~
"No, not exactly that replied the be-