The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1859-01-26

the young ladies were anxious to see how
"Nance' would suffer the awful shock
Others, again, who had closely observed
the turn Of affairs during the evening,
fixed their attention upon the Judge, to
how lie would come out OF the scrape,
AT length the trying moment was an
nounced. The Judge arose very cautious.
ly from the chair which he had occupied
in one corner of the room, and casting his
eye over the company, he recognized the
sheriff of the county, who was present as
an invited guest The Judge had imbibed
| just enough TO make him forget the nature
Of his business. was full of judicial
talk" and required nothing but the pres.
ence Of the sheriff to start him. Looking
sternly at the officer, he shouted
Mr.. Sheriff, open the Court and call
order!"
A general twitter followed this com.
mand, in the midst of which the sheriff
took " the Court" gently by the arm, and
led him to his seat in the corner, at the
same time informing the august parsonage
of his mistake.
Everything now bid fair for pleasant
and sudden termination of the affair, until
another annoyance, which was nothing
less than the absence of the bridegroom,
was observed 1t turned out he had Just
stepped across the street to join his friends
in parting drink, but before his return,
some cold-blooded wag had whispered into
the ear of our foggy Judge, the cause of
delay in proceedings" Instantly the
chair in the corner moved, and in that di
rection all eyes were fixed.
Mr.. Sheriff." slowly drawled the
Judge, bring Joe into Court on a supe.
nur,"-the Judge had his own way of
pronouncing the word-then addressing
the bride. who stood in the foreground, and
hung her head in confusion, he added, 81
spose you're the plaintiff, Well, don't
take on. Innocence and virtue will be
protected by this here Court"
This was the saddest blunder of ALL
The Judge was again made to see his mis-.
take, and would have been considered set
back, had it not been for corrective in
the shape of L" forty drops of the critter,"
which he instantly applied.
In few moments all was ready in
right down earnest, The bridegl oom had
arrived, full of joy. The bride, in "gor.
geous array" stood at his side. The com.
pauy pressed forward. The excitement
was intense. The Judge never looked so
dignifed in his life He evidently felt
every inch a Judge.
"J-J-o.e B-B.o.w.e-r.s," commenced
the man Of law, in that distressing style of
speech with which he was invariably
troubled when under the influence of liouor
"J.J.o.e- B.B.B.o.w-e-r.s. stand up.
Have y-y-you anything to s-s-say w-w.hy
s.s-sen-t-tence-"
"Stop, stop, stop, Judge" shouted the
Sheriff, from the back part Of the room.
"You are not going to hang the man, but
marry him."
The Judge drew long breath and
blinked rapidly, but stood his ground WELL
Recovering himself, he proceeded Joe
B.B.B.owers, do y-yOu t-t.take Nancy
H.H.Hopkins for your wife, so h.h.elp
you God 2"
This was tolerable effort, and Joe
nodded assent.
"N.N-Nancy Hopkins, it now remains
far this here C-C-Court to-"
Here the Sheriff again interrupted the
Judge, reminding him of the real business
Of the evening.
"Miss N-Nancy," resumed the Judge,
after being set right, "d-d-do y-y-you
t-t-take J-J-Joe Bowers for husband,
tito the b-best of your knowledge and
b-belief, or d-d-do you not 7"
"YOm bet" softly answered the light
hearted Nancy.
The Judge then took the hands of the
happy couple, and joining them, wound up
the business as follows:
{" 1t now r-r-remains for this h-here
C-C-Conrt to pronounce you. J-J.Joe
Bowers, and you, N.N-Nancy Hopkins,
man and wife /; and (hero the Jadge pau..
ed to wipe the Precipitation from his face,)
m-may G.G.God Or-mity h.h.have mercy
on y-y-your souls Sheriff, remove the
culprits !"
The company roared. Joe and Nancy
weakened. The Sheriff was taken with
leaving. The Judge let himself oat loose
in glass ofspple jack. Taken altogether
it was the greatest wedding ever witness.
| al H.,f.I:..uB.