The Buchanan County guardian. (Independence, Buchanan County, Iowa) 1858-1864, 1859-04-28

AhaS 40 sVi pOSoiOiC, NY uV"i iOu
eric" returned the Counselor; "bu
what Of all that, if these words bestov
upon you security, tranquility, circum
spection and happiness Their grea
advantages are incontestable, and if yor
are unwilling to pronounce them aloud
from fear of ridicule, l conjure you upor
every occasion at least to repeat then
silently to yourself"
But why so, father ?" enquired The
son. Your prediction for this prov
erb surely carries you too far, as it seem:
10 me-"
have not, my child, so much pre-
dilection for the proverb as for yourself
and l therefore am desirious Of giving
you, with this phrase. the serenity o
mind, the honesty of conduct, and the
good fortune in life, which l have deriv.
ed from it. Do not suppose that my
axiom was suddenly assumed and made
habitual. On the contrary, it was orig,
inally the result of mature and deliberate
conviction. l owe to it all | am, and all
that possess.
What induced you, then, to assume
such singularity ?''
(" The misfortune Of my youth, and de.
spair. 1t was only by means of these
unpretending words that retrieved my
self and became my own master. Your
ancestors were perfectly honorable and
virtuous people, but not possessed of great
wealth. What inherited from them was
barely sufficient to carry me respectfully
through my collegiate and professional
studies. and support me year or two
afterwards. l was then youth of good
habits and pure mind. l had been an
unremiuing and close student. 1 was
but too imaginative and exalted in my
feelings, because lived almost entirely
in an ideal world, among the liveliest and
noblest beings. This caused me much
harm. 1t led me to despise the world,
and l believed it, according to circum-
stances, sometimes to be inhabited only
by angels, and at other times only by
devils"
!" That happens to me. now-a days" !"
said Frederic, "and in spite of myself" "
That is very possible, answered the
Counselor, " for if young man does
not fall into that error, he can possess
neither true or warm heart. 1t is one
of those phases of life through which
we all have to pass. But to return to
my history. ! saw myself obliged, for
a long time, to labor gratuitously in the
courts, before could acquire title, and,
at length, employment sufficient to afford
me even a small salary. This l knew in
advance, for such is the necessary course
of things. But l determined to conceal
the fact of my poverty, as l was aware
that if it was known ] should be held in
less esteem by high and low than l de-
served. | was consequently always
dressed very neatly and carefully, in a
style that was then called gallant. but is
now termed elegant. kept fine office
and rooms. and frequented the best COM
pany. did not hesitate. from time to
time. to give little pleasure parties, not
withstanding their expense made severe
inroad upon my purse. But l was care
ful not TO incur any debts, and that, for
a young man Of my descent and position,
was not little creditable. l had the
reputation of being far more opulent than
l was, and | accomplished all this with
very little money. No one knew that the
whole year through my food was less
palatable and costly than that of any con-
Wet in the State Prison. Bread, water,
and milk constituted all the articles of
my bill of fare. But spare as my living
was. | was still happy. My heart was
rife with variety of enjoy not on
ly from consciousness of duties fulfill
ed. and from youthful hopes Of future
golden harvest, but also from many 9TH
er things. ! was everywhere welcomed
and beloved. The women received me
with favor, and l likewise stood we'll with
the men. But among all the individuals
OF my own sex there was only one par
ticular person who occupied the place of
a chosen and tried friend. This man
was a brother advocate by the name of
Schnecmuller. We had both but one
heart and soul. We were at the univer-
sity together, and there he assisted me
in duel, and came very near sacrificing
his life in consequence. He had proved
himself true friend in veal and woe.
Among the women Of my acquaintance
there was one who had more influence
over me than all the rest. She was The
daughter of General Van Tylen, and was
called Philippine. / loved her silently
for long years-loved without knowing
myself the full extent of my passion
1t was almost a speechless idolatry, and
yet my whole life was sanctified by this
love. No one was acquainted with the
state OF my affections, for l never ven
tured to speak about it to anybody
Whatever is most holy and precious to
the soul is profaned, as it were, by the
sound Of words. Therefore no one is
willing to make his real ard cherished
love topic of conversation with his fell
lows, as no one introduces among his
social companions the sanctities Of his
innermost religion.
but did you not conide your love to
the friend of your bosom % enquired
Frederic.
Nc" answered his father, "not even
to him, and that for various reasons, and
among them this +: because l, in my pov-
erty, in my lack Of business, and in my