Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1859-02-12
An Amateur phrenologist.


tai story OF certain, wag In Erie, Penn, Il
Jolly publican, who contributes a good deal
to the life of that pleasant but sometimes
obstinate borough. One morning a travel
ling phrenologist arrived at his inn, and
took lodgings. The next day in the vii
age paper appeared an advertisement sta
ting that Professor b. had arrived in
Erie, and would make g for consider;-
ton" examination of the heads of the cit
liens, and accompany the same with accu-
rate, reliable charts of character. For
three or four days the ellis were sparse,
but on the fifth there was a rush Of five or
six to lieapartments of the Professor.
One morning countryman entered the
inn where the phrcnolosist had his rooms,
and said TO our. aforesaid wag:
Is this the place where the phrcnolo@ist
F" holds out, that he can tell mans kar-
actcr BY the bumps Ga his skull 2"
@ Yes, answered Bonifacc, with arcsery-
ed and dignifcd manner.
Wal, want my potato trap lookedin
to little while, Where is the man 2,
81 am theman," said the landlord.
Oh You be, eh /? Wal, put in, feel
of my humps and gin us map. What's
the swindle ?"
+" There is no swindc, sir, chronology is
scicnce-a liberal science"
All, yes, spcct so; but what's thcpricc
for fcelmga fellers head 2"
" One dollar, with chart"
4" Wal, soit; how do do lie down or
sit up? Does it hurt 2"
+" Not in the least, sin Take your seat
in this chair"
There were four on five morning loungcrs
in the tavern who checked laugh as the
countryman took his scat, having first, as
requested, removed his cont, vest and neck
cloth. The way ola landlord ran his hands
through the hair Of the patient for mo-
ment and then said to the bar tender
Z" MIR. Flipliins, take a sheet of popcrand
draw four lines down its whole length, and,
put down my figures under the head as
tell you"
Have you got it?"
Yes-al right"
Very well, y and the landlord went on
with his exploration, which was rougher
perhaps than there was any actual nccessi-
ty for
Put down neutrality-suspicious. six
ty.
"Down, sir"
Very well j; reverence two"
q Booked, sir"
Combativcness two hundred"
What's that ~ said the evictim.
f" No matter, sir; you'll see it on the
chart Caution one; crcdulity four hun
dred"
"What's that last lump z" asked the pa
ticnt.
"Nevcr mind it now; you'll understand
i i b hg Y; asa Sfaa hsS-Aad W. now, Mr. Flpkins,
you have put these in separate columns as
usual ?"
Yes, sir"
Very well, add 'em up -
Add 'em up !" exclaimed the phreno
/ logical subject, g is that the wayyou do n
"Of course! how else could we GET
your balance of mind--of intellect"
Wall, so ahead p
low does it Dabol, Mr.. Flipkins ?"
Tho three columns are equal; they foot
ed up precisely the same %
The landlord looked solemnly and sym
! pathizingly towards his subject.
Itis very strange" says he; but it j,
SO. Plrcnology never lies. You have nc
intellectual status. you don't know any
thing, sir. Excuse me, sir, but / must
state the truth, whether you take the char
OF not; but, sir, if there is any truth il
phrenology, you re fool Under the cir
cumstanccs, sir, can scarcely expect yor
to keep the chartwhich you have contract
ed for; this isa matter of little consequence
as it will be valuable illustration of an an
tique species, which can use in my lectu
res hereafter. / authenticate all my lee
lures with real names and residence. The
charge of deception in science is one thai
has never been brought against ne, a;;,.
never"
"oh never mind give us the map
said the subject; " here's the swindler
for it is a swindle, I'd rather pay for il
than have you going round tho country ma
king fool of me everywhere else as yor
| have hereyou blasted philanthroprogen
tive humbug% With this explosion, tn,
subject retired Kqicherbochcr.
| WHAr is NINA young lady answers
"a thing to waltz with, thing TO hirt with
to be married to, pay onc'o Sa's, to keep on,
comfortable"
a FEW nights since, serenadin3 party
4 after spending an hour in producing the mos
dulcet strains, were informed by n p0lit
watchman, that nobody lived there
/
Final Notice.
/ 4 FINAI, settlement ofthe Estate OF James w
| a Couch. deceased, will be madein the 0rdi
MnrV's Office on Friday the 16th of Anvil nax n