New Orleans daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1851-1866, 1859-09-19
xxCErD1nqLY FUNNY RESULTS.


n "a
" ~ mo- Is admit that We like good laugh,
par,3caIsrIy u Ne expen Of those whom We despse
And lat sometimes bat mot very often, We indirectly
hrt thnrs calculated to supsinduce the opportunity
Soma time ago We dnbiously intimated that thert
~ possibility that the African slave trade was IL
full operatio1, and that " cords Of Congos" wouli
soon throng every Southern port. But We did'n
staae Il directly Or Indirectly. We only commented
upon ! Northern freesoil text. Well, in due cours
Of time the mails brought us Northern freesoi jour
nails. Didn't they howl and rave, and rant and lie
and didn't We laugh immoderately? Assuredly the
did, and We enjoyed ourselves hugely while perusnl
their diabolical lncabrations The business was no
. very digniied one, It ia true; but we have higl
authority to justify its use. Holy Writ says whel
9 you are in Rome do ~ Romans dos and when VI
deal with Abolitonists We have no idea that We ar
subject 70 the rules which govern honorable men II
their intercourse with honorable neighbors and, con
sequently think il We make any fun ont o. them
IL 10 alike legitimate and proper 70 do so.
A few weeks afterward, We took another view o.
the subject, having the same object to accomplish
and proceeded very cooly to give advice to the ap
preaching Charleston National Convention OF the
Democratic party We told the Democrats that there
would be- difficulty, perhaps, respecting the slave
trade question, and pointed out the mode BY which
Il could be lodged. We advised them to abrogate
The treaty with England which binds us to keep
squadron on the coast Of Africa to put down the slave
trade that the squadron didn't do any good, and
was coetly and unpopular that the North couldn't
well object to treaty abrogation and that such
course would probably suit both South and North.
This was III done deliberately, with malice afore-
thought and the result has been just what We antici
patsd and we have enjoyed to the fuest extent the
amusement looked for. We have put numerous
freesoil journals in rage, while the New York
Tribune howls frantically.
The Tribune Of the 10th inst lengthily and bitterly
reviews our article It takes all for gospel It has
no idea that It has been terribly hoaxed. And, to
cap the climax Of absurdity, it puts the Crescent
down Is Democratic journal, and argues that its
were made to advance the interests Of the
Democratic party! This will be news in the South.
west. The Crescent Democratic journal! If the
Tribune men were not all avowed non-combatants We
would be bound to have difficulty account Of that
last insnuaton. And, We tell them plainly, that we
will mot abide repetition Of the outrage. We are
amiable men-we wouldn't harm human being il
We could help itbut, gracious goodness! We can't,
wont, and shall not, stand that
AZ seldshness forms no part Of our nature, We are
determined that our readers shall have chance At
the fan 10 have enjoyed. Therefore W copy tie
three last paragraphs Of the Tribunes article. Pre-
pare 70 laugh
Presuming that the Southern Democracy will be
satisfed that its scheme OF removing the bl0ckadng
squadron will enable them to kidnap in Congo
Guinea, and other African slave hannts, and trans
port to New Orleans, Charleston, and other Ameri
can slave markets. all the negroes which the exigen
cies or the party and the planters may demand the
their case IN the most summary style. It says
Douglas and his very essential Northern constitu.
ency could not hesitate to place themselves upon this
platform; This compromise will, doubtless, prove
Whether this mode Of adjusting the difficulty will
be equally acceptable to the negrostealing Democ.
racy Of the South and their, yet, reluctant coad
utors Of the North, may be doubted. The morality
and decency Of the plan cannot be questioned It is
to cite what would be an analogous CASEY simply
proposition from the burglars and thieves of the
Five Points to their coy confederates dwelling in
cleanler parts OF the city not exactly to repeal the
laws forbidding robbery, larceny, and shopliftiDg,
but to remove the nghtwatch and extinguish. the
gasghts, 80 that they could conformity pick pockets
break into banks, and rob warehouses without run
ming the risk Of detection in the act conviction for
the ofense afterward. We beg pardon Of the scoun-
drelism Of the Five Points for instituting this
not it regards negro stealing in Africa rather
wicked, and great deal meaner than picking locks
and rifing pockets.
But seriously, one can hardly credit his senses as
he reads such coolly stated and calmly elaborated
diabolism A proposal to reopen traffic which the
civilized world has branded as piracy, and the pros
ecution of which involves the commission of every
crime in the decalogue, and the infection Of every
species OF cruelty that curses the earth And, not
daring to brave the indignation Of every honest man
in the nv rprnpfnatiu0 the nrin1Q dirpptlv
and in open day, the Crescent hopes to escape the
scorn Of the world by doing it indirectly and under
The cloak of hypocritica pretenses. And all 10 the
name Of compromise, and for the benefit Of Democ-
racy
Let not New Orleans despair. The party in New
York and New England alone will furnish dozen
who will gladly accept the Charleston
nomination on such a platform.
We are not going to answer the above in detail.
We can't do it, We are too full Of laugh for it. The
oke is too exquisite to admit of serious reply But
ne will simply make three or four Statements and
conclude: LIST, The Crescent is not a Democratic
paper. I'd, It has never yet, to knowledge, done
Inything to advance the Democratic party by argu-
nents, suggestions, or otherwise Sd, Nineteen
wentieths at least of the Shareholders Of the South
IRE opposed to reopening Of the African slave trade
lot because they do not think it raught with bene-
cal results to the African that it is not supported
y every authority which true christianity and phi
anthropy can furnish, but grounds Of expediency
And 4th you anatical FOOLS il the treaty was abro-
,ated and all coasts kept entirely clear, Northern
nd New England Abolitionists would furnish the
apital, vessels and seamen to kidnap every Congo
hat would be brought to Southern port. Pbarisees,
ave you no sense Of honor, truth, or decency?
Abd-elK ader though resigned to inactivity in his