Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1859-04-12
Tit-8its,
Ey Fuel for Lawyers-Coke.

ES- Fuel for Lawyers-Coke.
ES~The "Bullion Bank" will be a cap
stsl concern.
a P1E-oUs FRAuD.-Dog- meat mince
pies.
CoLr's P1sToLs.--So called from their
being small horse pistols. .. -,
EH"The reason why sailor is called a
tar IS because he is pitched by the ocean.
GyThe cause of the potato rot is now
attsibuted to tho ref.nInr-u motion of the
earth.
~T The lady who had "spark" in
her eye, has kndled match" without
trouble.
EEWhy was Adam the first runner
that ever lived? Because he was the first
in the human race.
ESr SmaN newsboy to n Mortified dandy
Wont you scratch my cad, Mister?
my 'ands is so cold l can't"
@There are three dangerous institu-
tions in the world, VIZ, kicking colts,
pretty calico, and gunpowder.
w-"A Retainer at the Bar" as the
poor boy said. when caught by dog, as
he was about to mount the orchard fence.
H Registry laws are now pending in
the Legislature of New Jersey, Michigan,
Illinois and New York
"-"Is that clock right over there?"
asked a visitor. "Right over there? Ger
tainly, tain't nowhere else." ....
ES- Mrs. Partington says that her
minister preached about the parody of the
probable son.
GS The man who walked six hours on
a stretch is an inch or two longer than he
was before the excursion.
~"I'm particularly uneasy on this
point, ,.as the fly said. when the boy stuck
him on the end of a needle.
Why isn't a reporter like police
man? Ans. Because one takes down
what the other takes up. ..
ES Macauley savagely saws the Puri-
tans hated bear batting, mot because it
gave pain to the bear, but JecauS1 1t gdpe
pleasure to tie Spectot0r.
g'Why does father call mother
i oney?' asked boy Of his eldest brother
''Car't tell cept us because she has
large comb in her head"
Ew"Doesticks. describing New
York boarding house, says you can always
tell when they get new cook, by the color
of the hairs in the biscuit.
EyThe transit across the English
Channel is supposed to be the sick tr ansu
alluded to IN the well-known Latin quo
utOn.
EH- The Washington "Unon" says
there is a class Of politicians in this roun-
try with whom nothing but the dyspepsia
is constitutional.
Gy-A dealer in ready made linen,
advertises his shirts and chenisettes under
the mellifluOus appellation Of "Male and
Female Envelopes
REThe Massachusetts lie gi, lature have
refused to abolish capital punishment-an
indication that radicalism in that State is
dying out.
re- In South Carolina, the slave pop
ulalion is 283, 600, The increase of pop
ula,iou among the blacks IS three times as
great as it is among the whites.
~~Therc is a local editor out West so
poor that lie never stands upon more than
one foot AT a time, for fear that he may
wear out his boots quick.
Eg Come out here and III lick the
whole OF ye' as the urchin said when he
saw jar full Of sugar sticks in candy
store on a Christians morning.
EE \ cu Ylake3 in Kansas sells
liquor in gun barrel Instead of Il glass,
that he may avoid the law, and make ii
appear beyond dispute that he sells liquor
Ly the taITel.
DANDY IN STY.-"I live in Julia's
eyes, said an affected dandy, in Cole
mans hearing.
Il don't wonder at it," replied George,
''for / observed she had sLye in one OF
them when l saw her last"
wThe question "Why printers did
not succeed as well as brewers? was thus
answered.
because printers work for the head,
and brewers for the stomach; and whore
twenty men have stomachs, but one has
brainsr'