The Alleghanian. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1859-1865, 1859-10-20
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6@ Laugh and grow fat.

E Laugh and grow tat.
ges- Creditors and poor relations never
call at the right moment
psa. The young woman who was "driv-
en- to distractlon, now fears that she will
have to walk back.
Bsg% All, said doting old father to his
wicked son, fear you will bring nv poor
gray wig with sorrow to the grave.
nA- \ lady may be expected to make
great noise in the world when she has her
dress covered with bugles.
ssa- An oysters mouth is certainly very
ugly, but sometimes has u more beautiful
pearl in it than the handsomest mouth of
the loveliest woman.
ssg~ Lady Mary Worthy Montague used
to say that the only thing which reconci-
led her to being a woman was that she
would never be obliged to marry one.
Gsg- Speaking of a tiresome young la
dy, Cousin Jerry observes that she has
nothing of originality about her, unless it
may happen to be Original sim
ma. Mr. Jones writes to a friend, and
closes by saying:
81 am glad to be able to say that my
wife is recovering slowly"
Eay~ There is man in Algers who tells
such good stories that his friends say it is
dangerous to walk with him in the forests,
for all the hyenas come round him to
laugh.
Ry~ \ genius once undertook to name
and classify the different sorts Of fools in
this world
''First, the ordinary fool second, the
fool who is one and don't know it /; third,
the fool who is not satisfied with being a
fool in reality, but undertakes, in addition,
to play the fool"
RG~ FLESH Color
country merchant once-an honest wight,
Who loved joke more than the light
Was called on fercely by a negress,
Who looked as wild any tigress,
For ''some stockings, good fiesh-colored"
The merchant smiled and looked awavward
Then handed down a box-and there. alack
We're stockings, sure-but they were black
asa- 1t is stated, on the authority of
some persons just returned from Pixies
Sssh) tAlS'C NiSh" l-ii Incl dIJtulJtSu 10
climb to the top of the peak, and when
within about six feet of the top, the point
broke off in the generals arms, and the
general and the peak rolled down to the
foot Of the peak together. The general
was badly bruised, but the peak was not
seriously injured.
Hea- General Haremba had very long
Polish name The king having heard of
it, one day asked him good-humorediv,-
pray, Haremba, what is your name ?"
The General repeated to him immedi-
ately the whole name.
''Why," said the king, "the devil him
self never had such name"
Il should presume not, sir" replied the
General, 'Eas he was no relation Of mine"
eea- BOREowING.-It is oftentimes DIFF
ficult to borrow money, but as general
thing, it is easier to borrow than to pay.
He was clever chap who made the TO-
lowing rejoinder
''Hawkins, if you will pay down the
principal of what you owe me, [ will
throw off the interest; or, if you will pay
up the interest, the principal can remain
ITO tell you the plain truth, Dobbins,
1t is against my principle to pay the inter
est, and against my interest to pay the
principal"
Hawkins was "mum," and opened not
his mouth.
BsS% y wag entered store in London,
some few years ago, which had for its sign
two baboons, and addressing himself to
the proprietor, said:
81 wish to see your partner"
al have no partner, sir"
81 beg your pardon, sir. Hope you
will excuse the mistake"
90, no harm done, sir; but what made
you think there was two of US %
"Your sign-the two baboons :" \
litter from the ladies' in the store-wao.
bolts in double quick time-"baboon'
leaps the counter and takes after him-no
go; wag too far ahead
QUEER LAKE IN JAvA.-There is n
queer lake in Java, which a traveller thus
describes 1t was, perhaps, hardly half
mile in circumference, situated in a
dense forest, and surrounded by trees Of a
giant growth, whose shade it was, most
likely, that impaired to its waters a tint
almost deeper than that of the sky, and at
the depth of six or seven fathoms, or even
more, every object to the smallest particle
Of weed was seen as distinctly as though
held in the hand. 1t had, however. an
other ppcutiovJtv that r,rnbobl,y -.