Arkansas true Democrat., 1858-03-30
signed by me JOHN BULLIN the Pass
attested tu by

put spect alt dullars wont fetch me. Pll go myself fur fifty, planked down, eff yull go long and see me hev justice. Lite, lite, ole feller, an let that roan owe yourn blow little, and I'll splaln this cussed afar what has ruinated my karacter as a plus pusson in the scetv about here. Ye see, 1 went to last years big meetin at Ratll Snalx Springs, and wer sittin in a nice shady place conversin with frien in the huckil berry thicket, when the fust thing I know'd woke from trance, what I'd been knock'd inter by four year old hickory stick in the han of ole Passon Bulln durn his alligator lookin hide! an' he wur standin straddle owe me. toamln at the mouth an preachin tu me about sartin sins an my wickedness ginerallv. My poor fren wur gone, an I was glad ove it, fur thot he ment tn kill me with his club eff he failed tn preach me tn deth, an 1 didn't want her tn see me die.
 "Who was the friend you speak of Sut?o
 Nun o-v-c-y -o-u-r b--s-n-i-s-durn vour little ankshus picter! But I'll tell ve one thing, George; that mite neibor gall got an orful con- founded stroppn from her nam with the stir rup lether owe saddll, an ole Passon Bullin had etsupper thar that nite, and whats wus nur all she cooked It fur i'm an begged him trmblin an cryn not tu tell on her, the durnd, internal hPerkrtikal, pot-belIied, whiskey wastin ole ground hog; but paid i'm fur 1t all, ef l haint will mean tn keep payin owe i'm all the tune. We'll, at neX big mee.in at Ratl Slaix, Wur on han, as solemn as a hat kerier at coll lection time, fur had promised the ole hog to cum an be convarted, jist to keep him from kiln me tuck seat on the steps owe the pulpit, to prove wur ill yearnest. Thar was a mon- atrous crowd in that grove, an ole BuIliu wur d preachin tu em at all orful rate--how the he'll sarpents wud serve em if they didn't repent how they'd crawl over them, rap thar tails roun thar neckS, poke thar tungs inter thar eyes an blow inter thar years; an if it were an oman. how they'd quie in her bussum, an try to crawl down her trock strings. An h. had em hot, holerln, an scared; the fact is, the thing was workn powerful. Now I'd kotch five big grey pot-belIied Lizards an had em n little narrer bag, what made purpos-thar tails all at the bottom, and packed as tie as a buutlil owe sticks
 50 while he wur rarin onto his tiptoes, on- benowenst tn any body, l onticd my poke an put the mouth up under his britchcs leg, an gin thar tails sluese an a shake, when they all tuk up his bar leg, maxim owe q mise sorter like slulrrils climbin shell bark hickory. He stopped preachin an looked for moment like he wur q lstnn fur sumthing, sorter like an old sow dus when she hears you whistle fur the dogs l guy big groan an hilt my he'd atween
 
 his self whar ye cut the steak outen a beef, then he'd fetch rub whar hosses tail sprouts, then he'd stomp, then run his han atween his waist ban an his shut, and reach down an roun mtily wlth lt-then he spred his big legs an give his back good shakin, sorter like a hog scratches agIn stump; leann to his work powerful, and squlrmin glneraily, sif he'd just come out en dog bed, or he'd sep on pisant trail.- About this time wun owe my Hazards (scared all hurt, spose, by all this rubin an scratchn an alappin,) poIed his hed out atween the p.sson's smut collar an his oie brown neck tuck peep at the circumstances, an dodged back agin.
 Ole Dullin's speech now cum to him; his eyes stickin out like two buckeyes Iung agin wall, aai his voice trenholm: Sez hc " Bretherin, take keer ove yourselfs, the He'll Sarpents HEv GOT ME' Snn ove the wmmin fotch a l,ain- ter yell, an aralnrod legged doctor what sot near me, allowed it wur car case ove Delicious TremendjuS, an thot he wur rite, fur it ao,u. trcmcndjus atore 1t dun with. Of went the claw hammer coat, an he flung it ahind him like he wur goln to enter lite Che had no jacket on) Mex he fotch his shut over his he'd faster nur l got outen my pasted wun, an he flung hit n the ar like he didn't car darn ef hit kepu forever, but hit loged onto a black lack. an | seed wun owe my Hazards a racn about over the big old dirty lookin shut skared like the devil Then he gin sorter shake all twist an he cum outen his britches, and he tuck em by the bot tom owe the legs an swung em round his he'd a few time an then 1otch em down kerwalup over the frunt owe the pulpit. You cud've hearn the smash a quarter owe a mile! Nigh onto about l5 shortened biskit, a brled chicken, with his legs crossed, big dubl bladed nife, slab owe terbacker, pipe, sum copper ore specments. hnp If hrnly ,rln l-ar l.,I whisky, aSput an three ove my lizards flew permlskusly all over that ar meetin ground, out en the upper ind owe them big flax britches.- Wun owe the smartest owe my blue Hazards lit he'd lust inter the bussum ove a fat oman, as big as skin'd hoss, an nj onto as ugly, who sot thirty yards off a fannin' herself with a lucky tail, an, smart tn the last hit commenced run nin down.
 So she war bound to faint an did it fust rate: jist flung her tuky tail up in the ar, rolled down the hll, tangled her legs an garters in the top ove huckilberry bush, an wur thar all safe, far an quiet when left
 Now Ole Bullin had nothin left on him but a par of hevy low quartered shoes, short wooin socks, an eel skin gaters to keep off the cramp. an his skare wur growth on him fast. He wur plum crazy, for he just spit in his hands an
 
 middle uv the plus part the kongregation. kerdtf an sot in tn gittin away. He run, or rather went iii lumberin gallop, hevy, like an ole wagon hoss skared by locomotive When he jumped bench he shook the yerth an his self too. Bonnetts an fans clar'd the way. an he had purrectly far track tn the oods. He weighed nj onto three hundred, he'd black stripe down his back like onto an ole bridle rein. an his belly looked about the size au' cutler nv big beef paunch, an hit a shakin from side to side. He leaned back rum 1t like little feller a totln' ny big drum at muster, an hcarn it l slosh plum to whar 1 wur. Thar wur cramp knots on his legs as big as warnus, an all over he minded me uv crazy ole elephant what war | possessed by the devil, with hits years, snout, all tushes sawed off, an rared up on hits hind | legs, agoln away from emediate trubhle and tri- bulation. lie did the loudest an scariest an fus- siest runnin ever seed since dad racel with the hornets, to be no faster than it wur
 Well, he disappeared in the thicket, an owe all the nises ye ever heerd it wur thar in a cur kle of two hundred feet or thar-about sum wimmen screamn they wur the skerv wuns sum lartin, they the wicked wuns; some cryln, they was the fool ones, (Sorter ove the Lovengood stripe;) sum tryin to git away UT hide thar faceS they was the modest ones sum look. in arter Ole Bullin, they was the curious wuns sum on thar knees with thar eyes shot, but tha faces turned the way the old mudturkl was { runnin, they was the decetful wuas; sum hang Tn tu thar bows, they wus the sweet wuns: sun duin nothin, they wus the waitin wuns an tn, most dangerous ove ali owe em by durnd lon. site. tuck a big skeer myself arter bibi as big as brick, disciplin, an a book called catarlasm, a few rocks, an sich like fruit, spat tered onto the pulpit nj onto my he'd; an as tn, Lovengoods, durn em! knows nothn but tn rul when they git six cared, jist put towards th' swamp on the krick. As 1 started black bot til owe baldface smashed agin a tree fornnst me Sum durn fool perfessor dun this, who he'd nor zeal then sense; fur I say that any man who, vast quart ove good whisky fur the chance ov knockin poor devil like me down with it. the bottil was wuth nothin, isn't as smart A ole squire Msckmullin, an he shot his self witt hoe handil, an hit warnt loaded at that Well you know, George, orter run fast--jfs