Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1858-06-23
@ Gkoite giteratnre
From Harper's Magazine for June.
A MOTHERS CONFESSION.
CONTINUED FROM OUR LAST.

"Walter my baby darling, wake u1
for mamma !" l screamed in the childs
unconscious ear, growing wild with fear d
threw him to and fro, and flew about the
room, now to the fire, now to the window,
in vain efforts to shake off the horrible stu
por which bound as with spell every limb
and feature Nothing but the faint breath
ing gave any token fife, and to my excl
ted terror even that seemed almost spent,
The nurse came back presently, faltert
ing out that Mr.. Granger was not at hon
but the yioaent> ringing had brought otf1F
servants to the room, and with as much
possession as l could command, l or
dered one to 60 for the nearest physician,
and another to try and find my Hllusband-
though Remembered, with sinking heart,
that to-day was Saturday, and it was his
usual custom to go out of sdwn on that
| day; so it was more than likely that he
was miles away from the city at this time
Still | sent the servant on the search, and
seated myself then with the baby on my
lap; giving over my vain attempts to rouse
him, and waiting as calmly as could for
doctors arrival.
1t seemed ages before he came, and my
baby slumbered on in my arms, his little
heart beating more and more feebly, the
breath coming with still fainter inspirations,
and the small, palid face looking already
as if it lay under the shadow of death
: What agony of suspense and dread-what
} yearning, remorseful love-what pity and
self-reproach tortured my soul during this
terrible interval, let any mother imagine
Selfish, and willful, and blind to my own
: faults as was, could not but feel that
had wrought this evil, at least in part; and
; | bowed myself down to the dust in an
; guish and shame. IfNorman-if my hus
3 band-had but come to me then, I woulG
!, have knelt at his feet in my despair anc
misery I would have clung to him fol
e pardon and pity I would have poured ou
: all the sorrow and penitence Of my hear
t in confession of my wrong-doing and i'm
e ploring his forgiveness-an SO | migh
/ have been saved from the worse wrong anC
y deeper wretchedness which awaited me
# But he did not come; only the doctor
t. at last; and saw, as he bent over the ba
by, the hopeless sentence written in his fac
before any word was spoken.
"How long has the child lain in thi
state 2" he asked.
[ answered mechanically, "About tw
n hours. His nurse says that he was awak
is this morning"
O "Who gave him the laudanum e.
,e "The nurse, l suppose" replied in th
at same way j; but she declares she has give
s. him nothing"
w He turned sharply to her as she croucl
to ed upon the floor, hiding her face-"Te
I'd the truth at once, or | will have you a
o. rested for poisoning. When did you gi,
RS laudanum to this child J.; and how long h
,st he been asleep? He was not awake tv
la hours ago!'
.rp A burst of sobs and incoherent assertio
81 of innocence was her only answer at fir
ite butafew energetic words from him broug
,at out the truth presently. It was the @
in story, often told. My neglect and ind
. ference had made her unscrupulous IN t
,as use of means to relieve herself from troub
les "She had often given him drop or SC
on "when he had collie, and it never did hi
nd any hurt. Last night he fretted, and $
ler gave him some in his milk, and she did
lar believe he had been awake since. S
,as had dressed him in the morning, to try
she wake him up, but he hardly reused |
lly. only opened his eyes once, and dropped
we again directly; and he had never stir
oy- since"
i've This was the substance of her confessi
ers listened to it without word, for | kn
Iich | had no right to reproach her. W
was the doctor thought of me do not KIN
He was not our family physician, ant