Nashville patriot. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1858-1860, 1858-04-21

gives to the world through the pages OF the |
Knicker6ocker, his ideas-and exceedingly ORR |
ginal they are-of the management of Fancy |
Fairs, which have become an '.institution" in
this country. We make few extracts from
the essay:
s'Wonderous objects of personal wear have
these eyes beheld at such festivities. A deco
rative sample Of nocturnal head-gear has been
presented to my astonished vision, averred to
contain ninety miles of thread to an ell Of
cloth! firmly declined proposition to try
on this midnight coronet, lest the opposite
sex might resent the incursion upon their do
main by the fearful retaliation of adopting
an essential part of the male attire, sacred TO
domestic discipline, and without which no
authority can be obtained. By laboFious
computation have ascertained that the time
employed on this useless embroidery, would
have suficed to fabrcate the following arti-
cles of philanthropic utility. viz. namely to-
wit: Seven hundred and sixty Boriboolan
cravats; thirty-eight dozen pinafores for desti-
tute infants in South Africa; siXty-eight dozen
table cloths for the starving savages of Rari-
tongo; one hundred and twenty long boots
for the pearl fishers Of Wankifunto; two hun
dred buckskin breeches for the SubversiOn of
Flcas in California; seven hundred dozen
towels for the Meioration of the Cuticle of
the subjects of the King of Dahomey; and
| four hundred and eighty dozen hem-stitched
handkerebiefs for the suppression of perspira-
| ton at Boggley-W ollah.
{ must be admitted, that of late, cOnsid-
| cradle improvements in the management of
| the rattle once so great an engine of chican-
erv. have been effected, so that. as | am credi
bly, informed. il is not unusual for somebody
| to win, and be allowed TO go quietly away
| with the article in which he buys an interest
f,af a1xx ,,arfor Cd
as to be held to be difficult, if not utterly i'm
| possible. A further improvement is suggest
| ed, but which meets with little favor, that the
! object to be ruffled should not be placed at
more than ten times its actual value, at pres
| ent net profit Of one thousand per cent,
| being considered, in the ethics of fair man.
| ayers, to be the least that can be entertained.
in justice to the cause in which they are en-
| gagged. A fashion has hitherto prevailed, but
! is happily now becoming obsolete. of refusing
! any change back for the purchase of an
ticle. no matter how large the denomination
| OF the sum rendered, thus compelling the VIC
tim to disgorge his substance with the dismal
/ satisfaction of having clothed the hungry aud
fed the naked with the funds whcrewith he
] fondly hoped to pay his debts.
:. But when our fair countrywomen lend
| their talents to the illustration of ideal and
! historical subjects. by means of wax work,
/ and the aids of costume, we cannot deny the
| potent temptation to purchase at any price
| even ut fair-the fruits of their labor. Be
hold that commanding figure the Goddess of
! Liberty. in ftaXen wig and extensive skirts
rcsolutely clutching the cap-crowncd staff. as
| if, emulOus of the magnet she had determined
! to be true TO the pole. at the fearful price Of
being mistaken for disguised barber
''Niew with hushcd emotion that biblical
! group OF the Good Samaritan who, if faces 90
| for anything, is an irreclaimabe william, as
i Il L.,
! grace OF a milkman, he pOurs nothing out of
an impossible jug into an incredible chasm in
! the head of a serene though mauldin wretch,
evidently in the last stage of whisky
- Admirable also. is that other scene from
! inspired histOry-the iraternal consignment
Of the beleagured Joseph to a deep hole by
his unnatural brethren, pending the advent of
| the approaching caravan-a ptitul tableau-
hanging by a suspensory ligament round the
pit of his stOmach-Over a pit for which he
has evidently no stOmach-in which transac-
ton the patornal gift of the pOlychromatic
~jerkin plays an important part.
Il have been better pleased, however, with
the reconciliation of the rcpentant Mrs. Part
ingtOn with her reputed offspring. just arrived
from his foreign tour, during which the has
sown his wild oats-we refer 10 the parable
Of the probable son of that venerable lady,
for whom is slain an infatuated calf-where
the household is made merry over the young
sinner. who closely resembles destitute, re-
turned Californian. and looks far more hun
CRY than honest. This genial group enforces
her own proverb, that real dinner in the
suburbs where love is preferable TO 'stolid
OK and hatred Herewith
There are other subjects which l have not
seen thus delineatCd, but which appear to me
to be equally capable of being successfully
rendered; such a. scenes in the life of Noses
ian early one for example, where he narrow
ly escapes being gored by bull-rush;) the
thrilling act of Sampson vanqushing hosts
with his maXillary weapon, or his iDimitable
performance of Staying the gates of GAIA:
the cOnvivial meeting of Darid and Goliah
showing the effect Of the immodcrate use OF
the sling on the human constitution; the dis
posal by ESdu of his patrimOny for n mess OF
potage JulieHHe'- all capable of being made
the vehicle of much instruction and entertain
ment to the youth of our land. The stories
of Scripture may even be made to become a
key to the revelations of science, the phenom.
cnOn of the rainbow. for instance, (whOse col,
OrS, like those of toper's nose, exhibit a
natural result of being constantly on ben
der,) being explained to the meanest capaci-
ty, and established as a Kuower's Arc. Ohus
by "A neat and serviceable pun, indicating it,
! origin and truth BE- in divers ways evolved in
every department Of knowledge.
What catiff so rash ~ to dare deny the
| prcscnc" of Art among rs? Take him to a
fair. and let that gorgeous picture, affluent in
all the colorS of the rainbow, the Battle OF
Waterloo with it, cruel and sanguinary scenes
! (whcrcin both Napoleon and his enemies are
worsted.) done with darning-ncedle, reply
and cxtinguish the traitor forever
I'VE may point. also, in triumph, TO another
| work Of equal merit, which displays that
touching episode in the life of Charl, l., where
that monarch is depicted. dressed in robes OF
violet. taking leave of his green and yellow
children, while his royal nose obtrudcs upon
us in carbunclcd state, garnished with T &C.
tangular pimple, of purple hue, all OF wool
J woolly. The majestic features of that dccap-
itatgd potentate are seen blocked out in eligi.
BILE squares of various colors like map of u
western city. all the outlines of his face cNhi-
biting edges like "A coarse hand-saw. or flight
of door-stcps.
To whom are we indebted for this grace
less invention Tor perpetuating in feecy, Ian
atous aud hoculent stitches, the memorable
| events of history? MAY his visions be haunt
ed 10y the leathericst of medals.
The appalling extent of this mode Of de-
/ ljneation is calculated To excite the liveliest
appreEensons in the breast of all true lover,
of art and loyal patriots; for what, NAV ask
would become of our veneration for the ar
dorcd Father of his country. should the nee
dle-workcrs assail his sacred image with pre-
medltatcd punctureS, and hold him up IN var
iegated lamb's-wool through all coming time
10 the horr r-strcSen gaze of uew-begottor
generations.
Il need not remark that the system con
denim furnishes more nutrment To the disma
epidemic of wool pictures than any 9TH
moving cause; and verify say unto you, sucl
are the inilammatory hurs Of these produc
tions. that even the ancient Jews, who locke,
~ solemn on all the glorics Of Solomon, neve
bchrld him arrayrd Ike one of these.
What, let me propuuud. becomes of sGcl