Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1858-03-06
HOW TOM CORWIN RID HIS SISTER
OF AN OBNOXIOUS LOVER.
BY a WESTERN MAN.

Every one mas heard Of that eloquent pathet-
ic and humorous stump orator of Ohio. He was
pronounced by Mr.. Clay Ga most competent au-
thorl;y,) to be the finest stump speaker he had
ever heard and in tins opinion most heartily
coincide, after having heard Clay, Crttenden,
Jones Of Tennessee, PR, BEN amin, Soue, Ran
DALI Hunt, Tom Marshall, Gen Lamar, Bates
Douglas, and a host OF others.
Well this great orator carried his love of fun
into every department Of life. In the private
circle, where he knew every person and unbos-
omed himself fully, he was the most delightful
and genial conversationalist / ever listened to.
do not know that he now. as age and infirmty
are creeping on, INDUCES hisproclivlty to humor
so much as he used to do. But some twenty
years ago he used to tell, with great gusto, the
following story:
"In early life so early that cannot remem-
her the removal-my father pulled up stakes,
and carrying with him the household goods
went from Bourbon county, Kentucky, where |
was born, TO Ohio. Notwithstanding a rough
and tumble struggle with the world, he had a
hard time to get on, owing to Il numerous and
rapidly increasing family. Well, family matters
had not much improved when had reached my
thirteenth or fourteenth year.
AT this time there lived in the neighhorhood
young man named Pickering He had Inherit
w q wei "dr GObu lOOhllH,
made strong profession of religion. This latter
qualification caused him to find peculiar favor in
the eyes of my father, who always was blinded
by professions of extra piety.
This fellow had strong hankering after one
Of MY sisters, who was a very pretty girl. To
her he was peculiarly disasleful. She seemed
always excessively annoyed at his presence -
Yet he was ever at her side. She dared not dis
miss him entirely, for fear of the paternal anger
Things went on in this way for a year or two,
and as pariook largely of my sisters hatred Of
him, resolved to get rid OF him in some way.
/ cast about for plan for some tune, but moth
ing occurred that gave me the slightest hope of
success.
AT last returning home late one summer night
from the mill, found the family at their night
ly devotiOns. Passing by the window of the
room in which they were assembled, saw that
Pickering was there, and pretty soon | dlscov-
cred that he was noddin5, and finally his head
dropped. Now was my opportunity, ! stole
silly into the hall, and rea hin! the hall door,
which was slightly ajar, and close by which
Pickering was, on Bonded knee | reached in
and quickly pulling his chair from under him,
he rolled heavily, as a sound sleeper would up
on the floor. The noise alarmed all. The Old
gentleman stopped in the midst Of his almost IN
terminable prayer, and saw the position Of Pick
erIng. All the family laughed outright; even
my mother smiled
Pickering enleavored to pick himself up as
rapidly as possible, but he had touched the old
man upon his tenderest point. 1t was eviden,
from his rubbing his eyes, that he had slept I'M
der The old eenl!cman's mnsiratons; and had
not my father a reputation Tar and wide for the
fervcncy and strength Of his ministiations, and
was not Pickering his protesting brother? 1t
was too much. Slowly yet most dgnihedly did