The weekly Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1854-1861, 1858-04-22
'HOkn Chinammm.

: Johh Chinaman Ia one Of the most incom.
prehehsible OF al human creatures. He
does oil ordinary things, 1t is true, in a man
ner quite different from ours. He shaVes the
upper side Of his head whilst we shave the
lower; he writes in perpendicular lines whit
we write IN horizontal ones; he begins his
dinner with fruits and weet.meats, to end it
with fish and soup; in taking tea he puts the
saucer on the cup instead Of the cup in the
saucer; he steers by the South pole instead
Of the North; and in looking OF our DINNER.
cial relations il seems that while We are
busy in transporting live Chinese to Ameri.
ca, he is quite as busy in the shipment Of
dead ones to- China. But, after we have
thus come to see how extraordinary Is the
mental condition with the consequent con.
duct of John in ordinary things, how shall
we find faculties to conceive and lahgtage
to express the extraordinary extraordinari
ness of his thinkings and doings in extraor-
dinfry matters! We do not believe that
can be accomplished by the imperfect i'm
plements of speech which we outside bar
barians possess, and without some aid from
the extra eighty thousand and odd words of
some ffty-volume-in.folio edition of the la.
test and best dictionaries of the middle
kingdom.
T. For, here we have the fsct. as we under.
stand it, Of some twelve f.6hths, more or
less, of proclamations and couiter. procla.
nations thrown off continually in great
storm clouds OF inky paper, between Com.
missioner Bowrng at Hong Kong. and Com.
missioner Yeh at Canton, with occasional
fintermediate furries of powder and ball
running up and down through the mouth of
the Tiger-whilst every now and then the
Earl OF Clarendon has been coming down
to the House of Lords, or Lord Palmerston
to the'House Of Common. with long visage
and solemn speech, full Of portenr dire
and threats of warlike assault against the
Tartaric obstlnacy OF the son of heaven and
father OF the moon-and while Commander.
in.Chief of Ashburnham mud High Pteni.
potentiary Eigin are dashing to and fro, like
men beside themselves, from Calcutta, to
Hong Kong uhd Hong Kong to Calcutta,
"p rplexing nations," but most of all per
picking good old Admiral Sir Michael Sey.
mour-and whilst Emperor Napoleon is
hurrying off ships and soldiers to China,
professedly to help England, but a little
more to take care that she shall not too
much hefp herself-and while President
Buchanan is despatching Mr.. Commissioner
Reed to the scene of common tribulation in
great ships OF war, so great as to render it
impossible they should ever get near enough
to the coast of the celestial empire 10 DO
any hlrm to its long queued inhabitants, in
the midst of oil this, when the half puz.
zied, half terrified world is about to stand
from under, as the impending crash Of EN-.
plre comes on,-lo, at that awful moment,
the belligerent allies make their entrance
to the heart OF Canton, chiefly impeded hy
the industrial enterprise of the Chinese in
stealing tlfcIr match trainb, fuses, and other
powdery contrivances of mischief, and sell.
ling them back again at double price, and
Imperial Commissioner Yeh, with his prin.
cipal officers, are found in the government
? ACE TRANQUILITY smoking their pipes, drink.
ing s"mshoo and playing chess, wondering
what the English and French are in such q
passion about, the Imperial Commissioner
himself bei.Hg quite ready to take an aquatic
trip down tho river in Sir Michael Sey.
mour's best steam rl1an.of.war, provided on.
ly th't during his absence Deputy. Commis.
sinner Pcikwa snail remain behind to carry
on, with such advice and assistance as the
assetnbled wisdom of England and France
may give him, the administrative affairs ofI
The conjoint provinces Of Quanstung and
(lnangsi. Aud SO Imperial Commissioner
Yeh presents himself TO Imperial Com mis-
sio er Eigin, and, with roguish twinkle Of
his little eyes. and significant touch of his
thumb and out spread fingers to his little !
nose, Well, what are you going to
do no"?''a--and the placid EIgin is doubtful
whether to laugh or swear at tAis most un.
eApecreS and most nnitn aginable manifesto.
lion Of the inIperrdruble Vis isertie of those
extraordinary Celestiuls. Who shall un-
lertake to answer the sly question of Com.
e1lssi r Yeh! Not we, certainly. And
we think that to find proper answer to it
will prove rather embarrassing, even to
such practised statesmen as the Earl OF
Derby and the Earl Of Malmesbu-y.-Bos
or Courier. @..