The weekly Ottumwa courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1857-1872, 1858-01-21

The Buffalo Republic has fat correspon-
de..t who writes that paper frankly thus:
As inlimated to yon, having come to the
conclusion that there was nothing fit to eat in
Buffalo, started for New York on Friday
last, on tho Central Railroad. / had no idea
that man with respectable quantity Of flesh
was looked upon with any degree Of surprise
outside of your city limits. only weigh two
hundred and thirty one pounds. and if am
said to be as broad as am long, it certainly
was no reason for the ticket agent at the Buff
falo depot inquiring edo you wish to 60 as
freight, or as passenger?" told him with
considerable asperlty, :" asa passenger, Of
course, )" when he charged me for tickets for
two! and upon my expostulating with him, he
very impudently inquired if supposed that
any one else could sit in the same sea: oc-
cupied. BEING aware that il was a matter of
doubt, l said no more, but heard him mufter
something to himself about hogs always going
as freight, as walked off. which remark was
made, presume, to an omnibus driven stand
ing near. 1t certainly had no reference to me.
Do you think it could?
I got on the cars somewhat rufllAd in temper
and after crushing two or three women from
diamter of ten feet INFO about six inches and
flinging out an appl. boy and popcorn vender,
80 that their identity becomes matter of con-
siderable research, faally obtained seat
opposite an old, scraggy lady and her ,lnmarri-
ea daughter. They screamed as sat down.
and was tempted to expand my lungs in the
same manner. for the whole seat gave way
with me and deposite! me with my wig in a
pool Of tobacco juice, and my feet in the boay-
unmarried girPs lap. Upon ext-icating N.Y.
self from the wreck, discovered. to my hor-
or, that | had split che back of my coat. had
utterly crushed out Of existence three band
scragey woman and her bony daughter forever
trieti to make my apologies, but think fail
ed. My failure is easily exp aimed, for who
ever heard Of any man making dec mt apollo
gy in fractured coat, and a head saturated
with Tobacco juice.
then went into another car, in consequence
of the Indignation of the passengers having
been aroused by the two women alluded. to,
and especially as heard gentleman will,
short hair and not very placid face, inqniring
if he hadn't better punch him. Having no
doubt that the him referred to. meant me, l
made myself as seldom as possible, and got IN
to the next car. The seats in the car. were
all weak, frail things, as four Of them fell to
pieces as sat down on them. Upon making
my complaint to the conductor--wh asked If
there was more than one Of me--he suggested
that had better go into the baggage car, end
sit upon one Of the express trunks. They be-
ingiron bound. he thought they'd stand it If
nothing else would. did go in there. The
baggage man who was not very polite, asked
me what I wanted. | told him wanted to
stay in there. lie said it couldn't be did; as,
il lcame in, he would have to so ont; there
wasn't room ssfor them two trunks and both
Of Us in tina, there baggage car" l accom-
modated matters with him by giving him dol
lar, Zone Of twenty Ihad borrowed,) and he
agreed to ride on the outside Of the car, while
occupied the inside. / got upon two ex
press trunks, and was verv comfortable. In
deed, should have been perfectly so, il the
baggage mar hadn't kept annoying me. He
kept diving his head into the car, and asking
it was going to New York, and upon my re-
plying that was, he would convey my reply
to the brakeman, who evidently had been talk
ing Of me all the way from Rochester. Final.
~, the baggage man drove his head in again,
as il to end some argument, and asked IL in
tended to 60 10 Barnum's Museum when got
to New York. told him I should; which :
formation he reconyeyed to the brakeman, who
calculated, "Thought so-it's him!''
I couldn't imagine what they meant. They
chuckled considerably, and said: "Seen him
for nothin." s.Twould cost two shllin's in
New York"-when | abruptly put an end to
their conversation, by putting my head out !. OF
the car door, and inquir:ng who was ''hims'
what "woald cost two shillings in New York"
and what they had "seen For nothing.n The
brakeman was somewhat startled, but recover
ed sufficiently to say, SEAT Boy" This an
swer affordins me no information whatever,
backed into the car again, much puzzled as
to what they meant. Dreaming that was be-
ing broiled on an immense gridiron, Cor the pur-
pose Of s'trying" me out, and that the fat was
running from me in innumerable rivulet., which
was being caught in little tin cups, and sold
by tradesmen OF all descriptions, arrived at
Syracuse. and there awoke, delighted to find
that retained my accustomsd flesh, and that
gongs were sounding ecstatic announcements
of"dinner." Twill write you soon again
Till then. believe me your much annoyed,
! FAT CONTRIBUTOR