The Cadiz Democratic sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1854-1864, 1858-06-23
Howl cam. ,o ne yInrricd,

ter stews, brandy cock tails, eisar-boSes boot
jacks, sbscOnding shirt bGttohs, whist and dom
inocS Shadows present-hoop skirts band
boxes, ribbons, gaiters, long stockings, juyenil,
dresses, Tin trumpets, little willow chairs, era
dies bibs, pap sugar teats, paregOric hive syruI
castor oil, GOdlrey's Cordial, soothing syrup
rhubarb, sena, salts, and doctors pills Shad.
ovs future-more nine pound babies, more hive
syrup, etc, etc. I'll just tell you how go,
caught. was almost the darndest, most tea
clstard bashful fellow you ever did see; it was
kindes in my line to be taken with the shakes
every time saw pretty gal approaching me,
and I'D cross the street any time rather than
face one; 'twas't because diden't like the crit
tiers, for If was behind fence, looking through
a knot hole, ! couldn't look at one long enough.
Well, my sister lib gave party one night, and
Istayed away from home because was to bash
ful TO face the music. hung around the bouse
whistling "Old Dan Tucker" dancing to keep
my feet warm, watching the heads bobbing up
and down behind the window curtains and
wishing the thundering party would break up 50
j could get to my roou. | smoke up bunch OF
cigars, and as it was getting late and mighty
uncomfortable. | concluded to shin up the
door pest No sooner said than done, and soon
put myself snug in bed. "Now," says l. "let
her rip Dance till your wind gives out" And
cuddling under the quilts, Morpheus grabbed
me. l was dreaming of soft shell crabs and
stewed tripe, and was having good time, when
somebody knocked at the door and woke me up
"Rap" again, 1 laid low. "Rap trap! rap.!''
Then heard a whispering and l knew there
were whole RATS of girls outside. crap! rap'!"-
Then Lib sings out, "Jack, are you in there?"
"Yes" says ]. Then came a roar of laughter
"Let US in," says she. II WON'T" says l, cant
you let fellow alone?" "Are you abed?' says
she. "I am" says l. "Get upn' says she 81
went, saysI. Then came auother laugh. By thun-
der! began to get riled. "Get out, you petit
coated scarcrows!" l cried, "can't you get a
beau without hauling fellow out Of bed? l
won't go home with you'll won't--so you may
clear out'' And, throwing boot at the door
felt better. But, presently oh! mortal but
tons! heard still, small voice, very much
like sister Ibis and it sad "Jack, you'll have
to get up, for all the girls things are in there!"
Oh, Lord, what a pickle! Think of me in bed,
all covered with shawls, mufs, bonnets and
cloaks, and twenty girls outside the door, wait
ing to get in! If had stopped to think l
should have pancaked on the spot. AS it was,
| rolled out among the bonnet wire and ribbons
in hurry. "Smash!'' went the millenery in
every direction. / had to dress in the dark for
there was crack in the door, and the girls lciN
peep--and the way fumbled about was death
on straw hats. The critical moment came. /
opened the door, and found myself right among
the women. "Oh, my Leghorn!' cries one.
"My dear, darling, winter velvet!" cries anoth.
er, and they pitched in--they pulled me this
way and that, boxed my ears; and one bright
eyed little piece--Sal-hern name was-put
her arms right around my neck, and kissed me
right on my lips. Human nature couldn't stand
that, and l gave her as good as she sent 1t
was the first time ever got taste, and it was
powerful good. l belive ! Icould have kissed that
gal from Julias Caesar to the Fourth of July,
fJack," said she, 1--WE are sorry to disturb you,
but won't you see me home?' "Yes," said I,
Twill" Ibid do it, and had another smack at
the gate too. After that we took
kinder turtle doying after each other, both
of us signing like a barrel Of new cider, when
we were away from each other. Twas at the
close of glorious summer day--the sun was
setting behind distant hen roost-the bull
frogs were commencing their evening songs the
pollywongs, in their native mud d-puddles, were
preparing themselves for the shades of the night
and Sal and myself sat npon an antiquate back
log, listening to the music of Nature; such as
tree toads, roosters and grunting pigs, and now
and then the mellow music of disant jackass
was waited to our ears by the gentle zephyrs
that sighed among the mullen stalks, and came
heavy laden with the delicious odor Of hen roosts
and pig styes. The last lingering rays of the
setting sun, glancing from the brass buttons ola
solitary horseman shone through knot hcle in
the hog pen full in SAILS face dycing her hair an
orange peal hue, and showing off my thread
bare coat to bad advantageous of my arms
was around Salss waist, my hand resting on the
small Of her back-she was toying with my au-
burnelocks ofjet black hue-she was almost
gone and was ditto. She looked like grass
hopper dying the hccups, and | felt like mud
turtle choking with a Goldfish ball. "Sal,' said
I, in voice musical as the notes of dying
rxvan Hyrjll Won hova mob, Sha trrpad her
eyes heavenward, clasp me by the hand, had an
attack of the heaves and blind staggers, and
with sighs that drew her shoe strings to her
plate, said, "Yes!" She gave clear out, then, and
squatted in my lap-she corkscrewed and cur
fumixed and rolled it. 1 Rugged her till
broke my suspenders, and her breath smelt of
onions she ate two weeks before Well, to
make long story short, she set the day, and
we practsed for four weeks every night how we
would walk into the room to be married, till we
got so we could walk as graceful as couple
ofMuscovy ducks. The night, the company
came, the signal was given, and arm in arm we
marched through the crowded hall We were
Just entering the parlor door, when went
kerslap on the CLOTH pulling Sal after me. Some
cussed fellow had dropped bauana-skin on
the floor, and it fooored me. 1t split an awful
hole in my casmeres right under my dress
coat-tail It was too late to back out, so clap
ping my hand over it, We marched in and were
spliced, and taking seat watched the kissing
Of the bride operation. Ny groomsman was
4