Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1858-11-16

EE"It is said that the word ''would"
in Rufus Choat's hand writing resembles
a small grid-iron struck by lightning.
wThe man who was moved to tears"
complains of the dampness of the premi-
ses and wishes to be moved back again.
Eg-Some people love to nurse a pet
sorrow-it is so interesting to NOPE about
the house, and imagine yourself victim.
EE-A never failing receipt-to pre-
vent hair from coming out--never let
your wife catch you kissing the servant
girl.
@-Why do physicians have greater
horror of the sea than anybody else?
Because they are more likely to sea
Eg-A miser caught fly, put it into
the sugar basin and shut down the lid.
"What is that for?" said bystander.
"HushP' whispered the miser;"I want
to see if the servants steal my sugar"
EFIn speaking of a fashionable card
writer signing his name, Mrs. Partington
recently remarked: ''He consigned his
autocrat to the missile with wonderful
efulgence. Isaac, son, hand me fan"
Es-A Tennessee editor charges that
Mississippians, as a general rule, can
stand dunning better than any people he
ever saw. We suppose they have lived SO
long in mosqueto country that they don't
mind being bored by bills.
wThis life is but preparatory school
to enable the student to advance to the
next highest class. How many believe
that? How many prepare themselves ac-
cordingly! A great many say they do;
but their everyday actions give the lie to
their pretensionsl
Eg-"Samivel, Samivel, beware of the
vimmin as reads no newspapers. Your
father married woman as read none, and
you're the sad consequence. You are as
hignorant as 'orse. Hignorant people
say its throwing money away to take pa
pers, and foolin' away time to read 'emH"
wA young lady says: "When I go
to theatre am very careless of my
dress, as the audience are too attentive to
the play to observe my wardrobe; but
when go to church am very particular
In my outward appearance, as most people
go o-there to see how their neighbors dress
and deport themselves" 7trE
EE"Juiius, was you ever in busi
ness?"
"In course l was"
"What business?"
"A sugar planter"
"When was dat?''
"Der day berried dat old sweeth cart
OBJ mine."
THE REASON WHY-A small lad asked
permission of his mother to 90 to a ball.
She told him it was bad place for little
boys. "Why, mother, didn't you and
father use to go TO balls when you was
young?' eyes, but we have seen the
folly Of it" answered the mother. "Well
mother" exclaimed the son, 81 want to
see the folly oft. too"
Eg-A Frenchman being about to re-
move his dry goods shop, his landlord IN
quired the reason, stating at the same
time that it was considered very good
stand for business. Monsieur replied, with
n shrug of his shoulders:
80, yes, he's yer good stand for de bu-
slness; BY gar! me stand all dc day, for
HOUOuJ COlIlo W AudhS Tie move!
EE"In our present perverse state Of So
ciety, it is difficult for man or woman,
particularly the latter) 10 always speak
the truth, without incurring the displeas-
ure Of some one, or, perchance, crack on
the head, By way of an admonisheri 1.-The
greater the truth the greater the libeli''
saith Lord Mansfield, ard his lordshIp was
a man Of God, and eschewed evil.
ESA formal. fashionable visitor thus
addressed little girl:
Chow are you, my dear?'
every WELL thank ycu," she replied.
The visitor then added, "Now, my dear,
you should ask me how am
The child simply and honestly answered,
al don't want TO know"
AFFECTING What can be stronger
than the love of woman? We have a
touching incident to relate, which beauti-
fully illustrates that divine attribute of the
weaker vessel. When the body of the
man who was recently drowned in the
Ohio River, opposite Harmar, was carried
To his family, the heart broken wife, with
streaming eyes and disheveled hair, rushed
forward, and exclaimed to the horror
stricken bearers, in tones expressive of the
deepest agony, "Dhlore is any to6akkey IN
his pocket Tn. 6ound to hare Ii"--Mari-
eta LvteIiig3ncer.