Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1858-09-02
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There is one defect in American education,
or rather in American character, and that is
our young people do not learn to converse
well. They think-they act-when reused
they are eloquent-but they seldom converse
well. The boy is taught to declaim-to
store his mind with those ideas that will IN
struct and even move the multitude-but very
rarely to converse with case and elegance.
The girl is disciplined to sing, and play, and
dance and sit gracefully. She is even pre-
pared for those womauly duties she must per-
form in after life--dutes Of the nursery and
the household. Her moral powsrs are cuti-
waited likewise in this country, so that she be-
comes useful, benevolent, amiable being.
But she is not taught to converse.
"She can talk enough" says the crusty old
bachelor, "pray do not teach her, to any
greater degree, the use of her tongue"
Talking is not conversing There is no de-
fciency in the former with our girls, To talk
and to talk well, are very different. The lat
ter requir $ ease, tact, self-contidence, good
sense we'll conducted education, desire
to please, and an amiable temper.
In neither sex should conversation be high
flown, declamatory, or above the condition of
the hearers. The voice should be modulated
to the subject, and never raised to an oratori-
cal pitch The style should be easy, natural,
playful if the occasion require it, with no
strained and far-fetched attempts at wit or
glitter,
There are occasions whom the very essence
of entertaining and successful conversation
consists in being a good listener, and in draw
ing out others upon these topics upon which
you know they can furnish information We
have said before that the great secret of pleas
ing consists in making others pleased with
themselves 1t is so in conversation. 10 be
good listener, is one of the secrets of a
conversational power. 1t is said that Daniel
Webster remarked that he never was in any
sensible mans company a quarter OF an hour,
but ghat he learned something He had the
tact Of drawing them out on subjects with
which they were familiar, and in this way,
gained information himself, and made others
pleased with him.
When girls think too much Of their beau
ty, they are very apt to forget that the pow
ers of conversation are needed to please.
Beauty may strike severe blow on the heart
but-it requires conversational powers to iol-
fow up the blow and render it effective. A
plain woman who converses well will soon
cause the want of beauty to be forgotten by
her powers of entertainment. Madam DE
Stael Holstein was an exceedingly plain wo-
man, but such were her conversational talents
that Byron declared she could talk down her
face in aquarter of an hour, and be felt to
be positively beautiful.
But the question occurs, how can this pow
err be acquired 1t needs some native conf
dence and much good judgment to lay the
foundation for it. Instructors can create it,
by always requiring their pupils tie give the
ideas of their lessons in their own language,
and not in the words of the text book. Pa
rents too, can early begin to encourage their
children to converse on sensible topics, by
calling out their opinions. All should learn
to converse.