The weekly Ottumwa courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1857-1872, 1858-02-18
From Punch.
Dialogue on the Douglas Dim.
Guilty.

Dialogue ON the Douglas DIM
Guilty.
Mr.. Punch-I don't seem quite to under
stand this diiturbance between your President
and Mr.. Douglas. Can you tell me in few
words what is its character, Mr.. Slck2
Mr.. Slick-Guess can. Bucks in fix.
Mr.. Ply Buck, if apprehend you sright
sir, you would Indicate the head of your re-
public.
Mr.. S-That's the critter. Promised Le-
compton Con should be overhauled.
Mr.. P-Promsed the gentleman what?
Mr.. S-Who OF airth said gentleman2 BY
Kansas.
Mr.. promised Mr.-a-Lecompton Con
that he should 60 to Kansas.
Mr.. S-Guess you have brick in your hat,
stranger.
Mr.. P-My facetions friends, sir, have been
pleased to say there is a brick under it.
Mr.. S-'Taint that. Have you liquored?
Mr.. P-Ineve take anything strong before
dinner.
Mr.. S-More fool you. Yes, Stree Guess
Pve kinder lilsin' for ye, but don't banker
after your old world habits. Take notice now
Walker throws up, his dander being riz by old
Buck.
Mr.. P-Mr. Buchanan should hang the
ruffianly fillibuster.
Mr. S.-Jerusalem and snakes! Don't be in
such darned hurry. There's a brace OF
Walkers, and ones not 'tother.
Mr. P.-Oh, beg pardon.
Mr.. S.-Hoid hard, and grin. You see.
Douglas has peeped through the hole in the
blanket, and seed bit Of light.
Mr.. P.-The blanket-Oh! Ahi a bit of
light, eh?
Mr.. S.-Spex you don't see none. Well
begin at first causes, and come on promiscu-
ons. Air the great and glorious republic, the
only nation in the world where the golden ca
gle of liberty can wave her golden wings and
scream her
Mr.. P.-T know all that.
Mr.. S.-Guess your hard to please stran-
ger. Wall, air we to have anv more slave
States than we've got? That's the question.
MR. P.-I trust not; and that the abolnina-
BILE
Mr.. S.-Calculate you'd better shut up
Slaves or none, we're always ready to whip
you. Besides, look at your Irish and your
Jews, and the others that you keep in abject
and grinding slavery. Cock-a-doodle-doo
Mr. P--T am silent.
Mr.. S.-Wall, then. Bucks with the South,
and meant 10 have it all his own way in KAN
sas, and make slave state state Of il, but the
Kansas boys kicks, and Governor Walker,
(not the filibustar, mind, you old oppossum, D
Mr.. P-Really, Mr.. Slick
Mr.. S-Shut up, tell you. Governor Walk
or. who was sent by Buck to Kansas to do the
work, finds it amt to be done, says Buck
promised him that the Lecompton Constitu-
tion should be submitted to the people, and so
throws up. Bucks wide awake b'hoy, but
Douglas he's wide awaker, and he sees that
to force laws on free and enlightened citizens
like our'n, won't pay, specially when crit
ter has his eve on the election in 1860. So he
just throws Buck over, and there's difficulty
Mr.. P.-Mr. Douglas being, it am right,
the most influential man in the States, his op-
position to the president would be formidable.
Mr. S-That's il, reeled out ncommon fine.
Mr.. P-Sir, thank you for your explana-
tion, and Ihope that no serious trouble will
arise In the United States. for which always
entertain the warmest regard.
Mr.. S-Don't worry yourself into no sort
Of perspiration about that, stranger. In a cor
rupt and debilitated old rotten country like
yonr'n a political, difficulty might briog ruin
and dismay, but where western sun gilds
the proud pinnacles OF American liberty, such
things are but the wandering breezes that cool
the wings Of our glorious eagle, and help HIM
to fly still higher towards the transcendental
armament. Will you liquor?
WHEN TO TAKE YOUR HAr-Young men, a
word. We ewant to tell you when you should
take your hat and be of. And mind what we
say. It is:
When you are asked to take drink.
When you fiud out you are counting sloyen-
ly and extravagant girl.
When you find yourself in doubtful company
When you discover that your expenses run
ahead OF your income.
When You are abusing the confidence of
your friends.
When you think that you are great deal
wiser than older and more experienced people
than yourself.
When you feellike getting trusted .or sui,
OF clothes, because you haven't money to pay
for them.
When you don't perform your duty, your
whole duty, and nothing bu. your duty.
e. Great Salt Lake City 10 laid out on a
magnificent scale. II is four miles 10 length
by three in breadth, the streets running .,
right angles, and one hundred and thirty two
feet wide, with sidewalks twenty fest il
width. Each building lot contains an acr.
and quarter Of land, and stream Of pure
water running through the city il made by ..
ingenious plan, TO Aow on each side Of every
street, and 70 irrigste everv lot.
Dom believe il.