Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1858-10-02
ANECDOTES FROM HARPER.

The Rev. DIR. -, of Georgia, has a rather
slow delivery, which was the occasion of an anus
ing scene in the chapel of the Lunatic Asylum.
AT his last appointment he was preaching up
on the absolute necessity Of trusting in Christ.
lie was illustrating his subject BY the case of a
man condemned to be hung, and reprieved un-
der the gallows. He went on to describe the
gathering OF the crowd, the bringing out of the
prisoner, his remarks under the gallows, the ap-
pearance OF the executioner, the adjustment of
the halter, the preparation to let fall the plat
form, and just then the appearance in the dis
tance OF the dust-covered courier, the jaded
horse, the waving handkerchief, the commotion
in the crowd. At this thrilling point when ev-
cry one was listening in breathless silence for
the denouement the Doctor became little pro-
lx. One of the lunatics could hold in no long
er; he arose in the congregation, and shouted,
H'"Ty Doctor, FOR mercy's sake. hurry! They'll
hang the man before you get there !"
TuE Rev. DIR. -, is notorious for ncorpo-
rating whole pages from the dscourses of the
old English divines into his sermons, without
ever alluding to the sources to which he is MAIN
ly indebted for much of his inspiration and rep
utation. One of his admring Pensioners late
ly said to Mr.. Fields, the wcll-known Boston
publisher, "Our clergyman is great preacher
don't you think, Mr.. Fields, his style is magnif-
icent, quite like one of the eloquent old divines
Of the 10th century ?"
"Yes," said Mr. Fields, knowingly winking
to by-stander, "his style is evidently that of
the jnc{icious Hooker"
Ton CoRwIN, of Ohio, is much in the habit
OF cracking jokes at the expense of his complex
ion, which is none of the lightest Every one
recollects the way in which he rid himself of the
imputation of favoring negro suffrage during the
agitation of that question in his State. While
speaking i'll the southern part of the State where
the. pro-negro feeling is none of the strongest,
he was charged with having favored negro suf-
frage in his speeches on the Reserve
Certainly, gentlemen" says he, passing his
hand over his face, certainly favored it. You
would expect me to deprive myself of a vote! ~
One evening, in his own parlor in Washing
ton while Secretary of the Treasury, his COM
plexion was made the subject of Jest equally
good. Mr.. Hubbard, the Postmaster General,
was discussing with young lady the gradual
assimilation ofhusband and wife to one another
IN personal appearance; and they unable to
agree, came to Mr. Corwin, who was conversing
with gentleman and lady at the opposite side
of the room, for decision.
"Well," said he, hesitating a moment, and
raising his hands to his face, II don't know how
1t may be with others; but as for me, married
white woman about thirty years ago, and l
don't see that it has altered my complexion any
as YETI
WESTERN simplicity-not greenness but gen.
ulne candor and characterize seen in the fol-
lowing incidents, sent to the Drawer by dis
tant correspondent:
"ln a wild Western neighborhood, where the
sound of the church going bell had never been
heard, notice was given that the Rev. Mr.. A,
distinguished Presbyterian divine, would
preach on a certain day.
"Ihe natives, who consisted mainly of those
hardy pioneers who have preceded civilization,
came in crowds to hear him. They had an in
distinct idea that preachin' was something to be
Lealu; ana oh ;-ianded to hear it.
After the service hau begun raw -boned
hunter, with rife in hand and all the accoutre-
ments of the chase about him, entered ana took
the only vacant seat-a nail-keg without either
head. The current of the preachers thought
led him into description of heaven and its in
habitants. With great power he had drawn a
picture of the habitation of the blessed, and was
assigning each of the patriarchs. prophets, and
apostles his appropriate place His Calvinistic
tendencies led him to reserve the Apostle Paul
for his climacterc. With his eve fixed ON the
highest point, and with an upward gesture that
seemed to be directed to the loftiest altitude of
the heavenly places, he said,
And where my brethren, shall we seat the
great Apostle of the Gentiles ?-where, say,
shall we place the Apostle Paul?'
'.Ihen pausing, to give the imagination time
to reach the elevation designed for the Apostle,
he fixed his eye on our hero of the rifle. He,
thinking. the address personal, rose instantly,
and replied
"If he can't do no better he can take my seat
sit is needless to say that that climax was
never reached"
Mr.. NEWMAN is famous New England sing
ing moster: i. e., teacher of vocal music in the
al ISfr ;rrL+ 81, H.,
of supplemented old lady, whose grandson
and pet, Enoch, was a-pupil of Mr.. Newman
he was asked by the lady how Enoch was get
ting on. He gave rather poor account of the
boy, and asked his grandmother if she really
thought Enoch had any ear for music
"Wa'al,' said the old woman, II really don't
know won't you just take the candle and look
and see !'
'PRoFEssoR Cox" from time immemorial has
been the "dust and ashes" man in Williams Col
lege, adding to his duties of sweeping and max
ing fires the other labor of making up the beds
of the students. The professor is wise in his
generation, and very much so in his own con-
ceit, and is always ready with reason and an
opinion whenever chance occurs for him to
put in his word The beds We're at one time
terribly infested with bugs, and one of the stu
dents said to hinf as he was pursuing his work
professor, nothing was made in vain what
were bed-bugs made for?"
Quickly, quietly, and aptly the old fellow an
swered,
'ro show us that we have here no resting
place'
The President could not have answered bet
ter.
USEFUL INFoRMATIoN.-The washerwomen
of Holland and Belgium, so proverbially clean,
and who get up their linen so beautifully white,
use refined borax washing powder instead
of soda, in the proportion of large handful of
hnrax nnwder IN ohout ten Oallnns of ho;nr