M'arthur Democrat. (McArthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1853-1865, 1858-10-28
9lt6s, 1Gllit mb Sentiment.


REoIPEOERTAIN TO Cure THE DIs-
EASE OF DIsUNGoN.-Take a trip to
England, imbibe freely Of ignorant
abuse of your country,mixed with con-
siderable ridicule Of American books,
American manners, and American
+institations. Add 10 this decoctioh
made up Of British predictions. If
these do not operate, take a mixed
dose of experience 10 fhe lanes and al
'leys of London poverty and crime. If
you are still a sufferer, inhale the
breeze of Italy, so redolent of maccro-
nj and beggars, and we will wager q
pair Of breaches for Mr.. Greeley, aud
new head piece for the Charleston
Mercury, that you will advertise for
an American flag with all the stars
npon it, in every newspaper you can
lay your hands on, and after you get
it, take locomotive Tor henearest port,
and hurry home to your GOOD old
mother country, as fast as the iron legs
aud fiery steam of the Collins line can
take you.--PhH. Press. )
An Irish counsellor having lost his
cause, which had been tried before
three judges, one Of whom was esteem
cd very able lawyer, and the other
two but very Indifferent, some of his
brother barristers were merry on the
occasion, "Well, now" says he,
"who could help it, when there were
one hundred judges on the bench9p
"a hundred judgesl There were but
three" ''By st. Patrickl"Ireplied he,
"thero were Oad and tloo eypherS."
A wagish, friend says if your wife
is everlastingly complaining of being
sick, just let her catch you kissing the
servant girl, and an instant cure will
be effected lie has tried the expert
ment and the result was that he never
had to pay a cent for help sincs.
A counsellor during the Reign of
Terror sometimes fell asleep on the
bench. One day the president gath
ering the votes OF the court, and COM
ing to ask his vote, he answered, start
ing out of his sleep, and not being
quite awake, that his opinion wasthe
man should be beheaded. "But the
business is about a meadow" said the
president. "Let it be moved then,n
replied the councillor. '.- s
1t is an actual fact that man who
attempted to hug a beautiful young
woman, Miss Lemon, has sued her
for striking him in the eye. lie is al
together unreasonable. Why should,
he squeeze q Lemon unles he wants q
punchG .. .'."
A gentleman at musical party,
seeing that the fire was going ont, ask
ed friend in a whisper, "How he
could stir the fire without interrupt
ing the music9" "Between the bars"
replied the friend. 90 .'-. 10.
One Saturday night a printers ap-
prentice went sparkling a minister's
daughter. Next day the good man
preached from the tcxt-"My daugh-
ter is grievOusly tormented. with q
deUl." .... .g
A young lady lately appeared in
male attire, in Baltimore; and one o.
the editors says her disguise was SO
perfect that she might have passed for
a man, chad sic a little more modes
ty." s...t r. a7gf
A friend who recently returned from
Washington, in reply to a question as
to where he had been, replied, IL have
been after an Office, and got the refusal
of it.
At Hanover young lady WAS fined
ten thalers for "having worn so large
a crinoline as to entirely fill the pave
ment and impede circulation"
A western editor having published
q long leader on "Hogs," a rival pa
per in the same village upbraids him
for intruding his family matters upon
the public. Gesr
A bashfnl printer refused astuation
in a printing Office where females we're
employed, saying "that he never set
up with a girl in his life" ga
Every family ought to keep kitten
to amuse the children. They should
also keep children to amuso the kit
ten. Pos .''' d,
Girls sometimes put their lips out
poutingly, because they are angry,
and sometimes because their lips are
disposed tomeet you halfway. s.,
"Did you ever see a lunar bow,
missl" ~ have seen a great many
beaus by moonlight, ifthats what you
mean.n, -.---......- ...... ~
Never borrow a cotton umbrella:
silk one can be obtained with the sans
degree of effort, ,and'lasts quite as long.
g Speaking of cheap thipos--it costs