Marshall County Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1855-1859, 1858-07-15
OUR Little Joker.

young fop to rich old farmer.
Look at that field of grain,' replied the
farmer. the well filled heads hang down,
while those that are empty stand upright
No dust affects man like dust-no
glasses affects bis eyes like glasses of bran.
Make an honest man of yourself, and
yoa will then be that there is one ras
Cal less in the world.
! 1t is sail that some babies ars so small
that they can creep into quart measure
But the way that some grown up folks
can walk into such measures is ssionish-
ing.
Mother, said q little GIRL this book
tells of the angry waves of the OCEAN
Now what makes the ocean get angry?'
Because il has been crossed so often,
my son.
when Jskyll, the witty lawyer. was
asked what was the difference between an
attorney and lawyer, he replied. About
the same difference that exists between en-
alligator and crocodile
The man who ''took it cody" brought
it back slightly heated.
L am glad that you are married at last, >
said one man to another, the other day
L don't see why you should be- said the
nswIy married Individual L never done
you any HARM
How to get wife--6nd good, smart
girl, and 90 light off to the squire or the
parson.
, If you want to know whether tree is
hollow or not, az 1t.
The man who 'courted An investigation
says il isn't half as pleasant as cour.ing p
pretty girl.
; The parson whe prefaced his sermon
wi h Let us say few words before we be-
gin, is about equal to the chap who al
ways took nap before he went 10 sleep.
Good morning, Mr.. Perkins. Have
, you some excellent nsuasses?'
No, ma m. Our excellent 7aaiasses are
all goue, but we have some excellent old
West Engine, and a sort of mulasses which
, is made from maple sugar, and which we
call seerup.'
/, want to know, Mr.. Perkins. if this
=, Seerup is acterly made of maple sugar?
L pledge you my word of honor. Mrs
Hornsby. that it it is acterly made of the
= ginuine birds eye maple sugar
Then, Mr.. Perkins, | shall not inter
rogale any more. but, without further cir.
cumlocuiion. proceed TO purchase half q
; pound of the seerup.
L beg pardon. Mrs. Hornsby. We
dont't sell it by weight, but by measure.
'Oh. By measure; then | will take hal
yard
Evident sensation throughout the insti
:, tuition.
) Boys said a school teacher the othe
e day. what is the meaning of all tha
S racket in the school?'
e lbs Bill Sykes. sir. who is all the tim,
Y imitatating the locomotive
. Come up here, William, if you hav.
turned into locomotive. it is time yo,
were switched off,
: The best way to disperse a crowd o
o idle BOYS, is 10 offer to teach them tht
S Chatechism To disperse crowd of men
: pass around The hat and solicit money 70
: some charitable object.
;, Why does the tooih-ache impose 81
: lence oD the sufferer?
\ Because it makes him hold his jar.
s is Chicago hospitable place. SAM
:. 1t is that replied Sam, Il staid there
e year. and was in the hospital all the time.
= ). An old gentleman says that he is tn
!. last man in the world to tyranize over hi
= daughters affections. So long as sh
;. marries the man of his choice he don
= care who sho falls in love with.
d Bill, I'll give you whipping for that
J. when get time. oh. never mind, dad
# dy,' replied the patient boy. 1 can wait
An empty sound-that of railroa
.s car when You are just too late for To
;. train.
$ They place the cowcatcher on the hin
|, end of one of the New York railroad
Y. trains, to keep unruly cattle from runninl
al over the cars. ne CCuUuclcI Oh liza
n train offered a free possage to a man vii
m wooden leg. but the poor cripple decline
in the offer. AS he was in something of q hui
W ry.
le Il have come for the saw, SIR said a
% urchin.
IN What saucer asked the neighbor.
III Why the saw, sir, you borrowed. r;
G piled the urchin.
i borrowed no saucer.'
Sure you did. sir; you borrowed OF
+ saw. sir.
u BE of: never saw your saucer.
IN But you did, sir; there's the saw. nov
. SIR
to oh. you want the saw. Why the thur
der didn't you say SO at first.
o. Say, mister. daddy wants to borro'
II. your last newspaper. He only wants
1t. read it, Tell your father. boy. that
want TO borrow his dinner tomorrow,
n only want 10 eat it.
T Some hungry fellow, without