The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1858-07-15
VARIETY.

Awful Gardner has been up in the shoe business
by his religious friends in New York.
The last news from England says that Queen Vic
toria Is again in - interesting situation -
Vivacty in youth is often mistaken for genius and
stolidity for dullness
.Corn bread ~ said the Trishman. s.we have not
got II; an isn't IL corn bafe We mane;''
One of our finest writer's saws that the nightly
dews come down upon like blessings How very
differently the daily dues down upon in these
harI times.
4 The unfortunate youth who drowned a few
days ago in food of tender recollectons slowly
recovering, but Yesterday he fell from the sublime to
the ridiculous and was fatally injured.
One of the Western eiitors speaking Of a large and
fat cotemporarv, remarked that if ali flesh grass,
he be a load Of hay
- suspect am said the fat man, 90 from the
4 way the ARE nihbling me.''
\ daily prayer from rhe heart of a pure and pions
wife for husband. engrosse1 in the pursuit of wealth
or fame, is chain Of golden words that links his
name every day with the name Of God. He may
snap three hundred and sixty-6ve times year for
many years. but the chances that in time he will
reuute them in everlasting bonds.
i The of the Holy Virgin at Jerusalem have
purchased the ruins of the proetorium which Christ
sentenced. The Turkish government have
toned the purchase The intention of the is
build IN IL monastery with large wall which
is 10 nclude rhe ruins, which they intend to keep in
4 their present state.
WAGGERY.-Some time ago. Sunday, we wended
our way TO one of our churches and instead of SER
mon heard an address upon missionary or other
benevolent subject After the address was concluded
two brethern were sent around with the baskets for
| contributions. farson -. who was one Of the
basket-bearers. taking the side upon which sat.
Immediately in front and upon the next seat neg
ligenrly sat friend Bill H, gentleman of in
finite humor and full of dry jokes. Parson l.
exrenslel the h1sket and Bill slowly shook his head
60 Come, William, give something said the
Parson.
n Cent do it, replied BIZ.
Why not l. not the cause a good one, ~
"Ye-: bur am not able To give anything
Poh. Pohi know better, you must give bet
ter reison than that"
.. Well. owe too much money! must be Just be-
fore am generous, you know
50 But, William, you God a larger debt than
you any else"
'' That's true. parson; but then he Gin't pushing
me like the balance Of my cTeditorsi''
The parsons face got into rather n curious condi-
ton, ard he passed on.
DEFINITIONS FROM a POPULAR DIcrIoSARY.-Life
IA time 10 make money. Money-The end of Life.
Man-A machine to make money. woman-A ma
q chine To spend it. Children-Machnes to snend II
3 on Economy-Buying things because they are
cheap, whether you want them or not
The new CyciopedIa, Just out, has missed the i'm
portaV word, Baby-a thing that squawks at mid
night. and will not be comforted, is called by its
mother, . little rosy pOsey, pinkum pink bless its lit
tie hearti' and by bachelors called I" brat''
CURE FOR SrANNERTSG.-At every syllable pro-
nouneefE tap 1T the same time with the finger By
so doing the most inyeterate stammerer will be sur
prsei 20 find he pronounce quite huentIv and bv
long and constant practice he will pronounce per-
fectiy well. This may be explained in two ways
either ny sympathetic cpnsentaneous action of the
Nerves OF voluntary motion in the finger on in those
Of rhe tongue. which is the most probable: or IL NAV
be that the movement of the finger dstracts the at
tenron OF the indviduI from his Speech and allows
free action OF the nerves concerned in articulation
k-Scieaflfc -fmeriean.
-,,-
who vas stopping at the Eastern Railroad station in
Portsmouth, waiting for the next train enouired of
oystander where he could get some liquor 4 place
near oy was pointed out to him. and he inquired if il
"A was goon The answer that II would nrohahIv
kill few minutes afterwards the saiIor called N a
negro who was saving wood near by, and took him
into the shop which had been pointed out where he
| tire itet him to drink. The bar tender asked tho
sailor If he also going to drink bnt recei ved
negative answer, and both the visitors left Very
soon the sailor again made his appearance called for
liquor. and was asked why he did drink when he
| IN before He replied that he had b en- watching
the g Niger it was just seven minutes since
be drank, and the liquor had not killed him in
that time. he believed he coud stand it. and would
ruh the risk--BostoH TrGreIler.
LOSING ALA FAMILY ScESE-Tbere is some
thing exceedingly tender well as instructive in the
following, which we take from the nkild's Paper =
A few years ago merchant fail1llin business. He
vent home in great agitation.
" What is the matter %, asked his wife .sI am
nnei; L am beggared. have lost NV aIIi'' he ex-
ciaime1, pressing his hand upon his forehead as if
ms brains were in whirl
All. sad SAD ms wife: e am left.'' can, papa,''
aiu Tue e,iest boy; ' here L. 60 And I too
papa saia nus little girl, running up and putting
her arms about ms neck 's rs not lost mana re-
peateo Edi,e And your two hands to work with.
papa, SAID his eldest, ''and can helm Won .sAnd
your two feet, papa, to carry Won abont ,, And
your two eyes to with, papa said l;,ta FdJ;s
" And you have Gods promises sa;d e,rand
mother. 81 And good Goi.'' said his WIFE, ss And
good heaven 70 go to- said his little 1irl And
Jesus TO come and fetch there said the eldest
" God forgive me- said the poor merchant. bnrs,-
ing into tears &c have not lost my all. What are
these few thousands which I call my ALL to these
more precious things which God has left me.'' And
ne ciasped his family 10 his bosom, and kissed his
"'ie ani children with thankful heart
An, no, there are many things more precious than
go'a aud bank stocks, valuable as these NAV be in
,he'r place When the Central Anerica was foun-
aerei AZ sea- bags and purses of gold we're strewn
9oolt the deck, as worthless the merest rubbish
Ahe, Htei was the prayer To some of the wrefched
ufNisors, water, water the PRAYER Bread
sS t was worth its weight in gold II eold could
me loss OF property must not cloud the mind with
= sd 's .or2etfsiness of the great blessings which
nc e't behind No should despair Tor mo man
M ms All, until he has lost his inteRritv lost the
''s'y os ood' and lost his hope Of heaven ~ lset