American Lancaster gazette. [volume] (Lancaster, Ohio) 1855-1860, 1858-09-02
THE YOUNG Wire.

Young wife, talked to your husband
in nv last let er. and l now address you.
told him that you had claim on his time
and society. There are qualifications Of
this claim which concern you particularly.
and so l speak to you about them. Your
husband labors all day-every day-and
during the walking hours, between the
conclusion of his labor at night and its
commencement in the morning. he must
have recreation of some kind; and here
comes in your duty.
If you do not make bis home pleasant,
so that tie ful6llment of his duty to you
shall be sweet pleasure to him, you can
not hope for much Of his company What
his nature Graves it will have-niust have.
He cannot te slave all the time-a slave
to his work by day and slave to you BY
night. He must have hours of freedom;
and happy are you il, of his own choice.
he take the enjoyment Of your offer in the
place Of anything which the outside world
has to give. l suppose there are few men
who when their work is over, and their
suppers eaten, do not have desire to go
down town "to meet man" or visit 'the
post Office" There is a natual desire in
every heart to have every day, and hour Of
social freedom-a few minutes, at least, or
walk in the open air. ard contact with the
minds Of other men. This is entirely a
natural and necessary thing; and you
should encourage rather than seek to pre-.
vent it. unless your husband is enclined
to visit bad places, and associate with bad
companions.
! Precisely here is iangeroas point for
both husband ard wife. The wife has
been alone during the day, and thinks that
her husband should spend the whole even.
ing with her. The husband has been
confined to his labor, and longs for the
hour Of freedom, in what ever direction
J bis feet may chose to wander. Perhap'
the wife thinks he has no business to wan
der at all, and that his custom is TO wan
der too wildly and too long. She complains
and becomes exscting. She cahnot bea
to ha9e her husband out of her sight for {
moment. after he quits his work. Now
if there be anyt ing in all this world tha
will make a husband hate his wife, it is
constant attempt on her part 10 monopolizt
all his leasure time aud his society, to cur
tail his freedom, and tendency to be Tor
ever fretting his ears with the statemen
that "she is nothing, of course" that bt
"does not care anything about her" am
that he dislikes his home. Treatment lik'
this will just as certainly rouse all the per
verseness Of mans nature as a sparl
will ignite gunpowder Injustice and in
considerateness will not go down, especial,
, when administered BY mans companion
He knows that he loves his home, and tina
he needs and has right to certaii
amount Of his time, away from hone' an
if he be treated as if he possessed 20 sue
necessity and right.he will soon learn to b
{ all that his wife represents him to be.
: tell you that a man wants very careiu
, handling. You must remember that b
can owe no duty to you which does nc
involve duty from you. You have III
: charge Of the home, aud if You expect hir
/, to spend portion, or all his evenings i
it,lyou must make it attractive. If yo
expect man, as matter ofduIy, to Civ
: a considerable amount Of time to your sc
ciety, daily, through long series of yeni
= you are to see that that society is wort
. something to him. Where are your az
y compishments? Where are your books
. Where are your subjects Of couvers'
y ton?
= !, But let us take up the question separated
] ] How shall wife make her home pleasar
- and her society attractive? This is
IL short question, but the full answgt WOO
make book. l can only touch a fe
IN points. In the first place she should ne
M er indulge in faultfDding. Ifa man is lear
,e e6 to expect that he will invariably
found fault with by his wife on his retu
IN home, and that the burden of her wor
of will be complaint, he has absolutely !
or pleasure to anticipate and none to enjoy.
hs There IS bat one alternative for husbal
as in such case-either to steel himsI
es against complaints, or be narrowed UP
re- them. and made snappish and waspish..
They never produce good effect, ind
any circumstances whatever The
ak should always be a pleasant word al
a look ready for him who returns from I
tolls Of the day, wearied with earning {