The Nevada Democrat., 1858-03-24
he world an illustration Of what becomes Of tn.

| children who are coaXed 10 give the money
when child. in anxious doubt as to the dispose
ton Of sixpenny donation from some gener-
Gus friend, is set upon by the parental s0licita-
tions to give it to the ''poor heathen," ofeeurse
that child gives 1t to the begging demand, but
the after reflections on the quantities Of lOlle-
pops and "tafy" purcbasable with the sxpence,
| will inevitably engender in the mind Of that
child the bittersst hatred Of all sorts of heather
! including possibly those who take their break
fast at the same table with himself.
Children, are in this respect, like men you
can't drive them into Heaven half 30 easily as
You might coax them into the other place and
the attempt to curb the wayward tempers aAd
moods of lght-hearted child; to make him
grave and serious in department to make him
speak by rote, and walk by the dancing mas
ter's rule to squeeze all the naturalness and
gayety out Of his little body by making him q
model child is about as reasonable as to try 10
harness butterfly to O dray and expect to
make him earn his living by turnpike traction
If the Cag-Mag CaDnibals of the Foo-Foo
Islands are only convinced of their gastronomic
errors and convicted of their gustatory sins, by
receiving the pennies of my boy, then may
the barbarian Cag-Mags go to their heathenish
death-beds without the slightest attention to
their bills of fare. A rattle-box is worth
more to my child than million canni-
balls a doll is of infinitely more Importance
than all the heather that ever stewed each 9TH
er, or anybody else; and if a child of Eve years
was offered pack of fre-creckers for his imme-
diate delectation, or the certainty of celestial
happiness if he would give them to the Foreign
Mission cause, he would Of course, If he was
decent child, take the explosives, and trust to
luck for his proportion of Paradisaic joysm fu-
tvo 4; he would enjoy his fireworks now, and
run the risk of any retributve pyrOteohnics on
1.-The other side of Jordan" If he was mean
child he would make the donation to the Cause
in order that he might for the rest Of his life,
90 on swinding mankind with impunity.
But spake just now of my boy. Now I've
got no boy, but of course l shall have boy
sometime. And if thought that boy was 60
ing to be an infant man, would ask his par
don for the liberty, and pinch his head off be-
fore he had lived to the ripe age of an hour and
half.
But he won't, of course he won't he'd better
not just let me catch you putting on any airs,
you vagabend, and I'll give you the soundest
flogging you ever had. He'll kick when l
switch him. but I'll switch the kick out of him,
if he don't mind his eye.
He'll break things about the house, and he'll
probably put rats in the soup, and shut up cats
in the piano-he'l tear his clothes sliding down
hill, and he'll get through the ice when he goes
on skating parties, and be brought home in a
very limp condition. Let me see shall thrash
him for going on the weak ice when his mother
told him not to? Very respectable woman, his
mother; very nice woman indeed, very nice wo-
man, but don't understand boys. OF course.
he went in the thin places, and of course he got
in; his mother shouldn't tell him not to go in
dangerous places, for of course, If he's anything
of boy, he'll go whether he has been forbid
den or not; and if she didu't forbid him. he'd be
spared the disObedence. No, won't whip him
for that.
He'll come home with black eyes and scratch
es on his face, from fighting Well, his mother
told him not to fight, but don't think she ever
was boy-a wholesome fight now and then is a
capital thing for him. and by Jove won't stop
his fighting, unless he gets to be bully and
pitches into little boys who don't have fair
chance with him. Come here, you cewardly
little wretch, come here, till belt you; and
you, Keziah Jane, you needn't interfere in his
behalf, with the plea that Il say want him to
fight, and that he thinks he must, and so as
matter of prudence he takes weak antagonists"
You needn't say that It is q proof on his part of
premature good -generalsbip, and that the boy
is evidently bora to be great commander. I'll
commander him come here sir.
He'll run away from school, and 60 frog
hunting; and he'll throw stones at the pigs, and
catch geese with ish-hooks balted with corn
he'll 60 in swimming where its over his head,
and be fshed out in drowning condition by
his companions-he domesticats puppies of
all varieties in his bed, when he thinks nobody
knows it. AS he grows older he'll blow him
self up the usual number of times, and get pep
pered with shot in feshy places. He'll accumu-
late chickens without the consultation of the
owners, and with his fellows have ornithologi-
cal pic-nics In the woods. He'll make himself
sick eating hard boiled eggs on "Paas" day.
M oUoo ha will prnnura in Tho usual NyaV
from the neighboring barns; he will pay his noe
turnal attentions to such melons, peaches and
other fruit as may grow in his vcnage and be
unguarded by canine sentinels. Ofcourse he'll
do all these, and suppose shall have to thrash
him for his exploits, much against my own
sense of propriety-for really don't object so
much to all these things so long as boy owns
up and tells the truth about it; but shall have
to thrash him in obedience to the old traditions
which say that for these and multitudinous 9th
er offences shall boy be belted may be able
to emancipate myself from these supersttions
in the course of time. If SO, no one will hail my
liberation from thraldom with greater joy than
myself-except perhaps, my boy.
Don't you interfere, Mrs. X. j. Doesticks
you attend to those girls of yours the eldest of
whom will be sixteen in about twenty years
from this present-but don't bother your head
about my boys
And give you my solemn WORD, MRS Doe
sticks, that will not have my offspring cor
rupted by study, and that if that boy of mine
knows one of his letters before he is eight years
old, or can spell his name, or can tell whether
or not continent is something TO eat, or can
assert positively that an Archipelago is not new
game; if he presumes to know wherein multi
plicaton table differs from a sideboard; if he is
qualified to give any information on the subject
of Troy weight or long measure; or IT, at that
tender age he has ever learned Sunday School
lesson, or listened to sermon, you and will
have serious quarrel for any such informa-
tion will have been acquired by stealth, and
against my express command to the contrary
But if, at that period of his life, he swears,
or lies, or chews tobacco, you may call me an
imposter, and henceforth let me be to thee as a
heather man. And again, if, when that boy is
eight years old, he can't swim, and ride, and
jump his length, and steer beat; If he can't
play ball. and fly kite and manage any sort
of game as well as the best of his companions