davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

In all the days of his glory-when the
land was ringing with praises of his foren-
sic efforts, and the Senate hanging with rap
ture upon his eioquenGe-the Cicero of
America, our own, immortal Webster, never
uttered sentiment which honored his heart
or head more than the following reference to
the home of his childhood:
cit is shallow minded pretenders who
make either distinguished origin a matter of
personal merit, or obscure origin matter of
personal reproach. A man who is not
ashamed of himself need not to be ashamed
of his early condition. Il did happen to me
to be born in log cabin, raised among the
snow drifts of New Hampshire, at aperiod so
early that when the smoke first rose from It's
rude chimney and curled over the frozen
hills, there was no similar evidence of a
white mans habitation between it and the
settlements on the rivers of Canada. Its
remains still exist make it an annual visit.
I carry nv children to it, and teach them
the hardships endured by the generations
before them. I love to dwell on the tender
recollections, the kindred ties, the early af-
fections, and the narrations and incidents
with all know of this primitive family
abode; weep to think that none of those
who inhabited it are amongst the living; and
if ever l fail in affectionate veneration for
him who raised it, and defended it against
savage violence and destruction, cherished
all domestic comforts beneath his roof. and
through the FIRE and blood of seven years
revolutionary war, shrunk from no toll, no
sacrifice to serve his country, and to raise
his children to condition better than his
own, may my name and the name of my
posterity be blotted from the memory OF
mankind
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

81 love to look upon young man. There
is a hidden potency concealed within his
breast which charms and pains me.
The daughter of a clergyman happening
to find the above paragraph at the close oi
a piece Of her fathers manuscript, as ne
had left It in his study, sat down and added
.'Them's my sentiments, exactly, papa
ali but the pains.
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

"Laudanum" is one of the most express
i've words in the language. When they dis
cove~sd the secret of the slumber- bringing
poppy, as 1t stole over the keen sense of
Pain, I'LL Torture fell asleep. they said Laus
Deoi Praise to God and so we have in
'Laudanum,' Latin hymn of thanksgiv-
ing that viii be perpetual.
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

TEE ESSENCE OF THE MATrER.-A young
Tennessee clergyman seems to have COM
pressed the whole body of his sermon on
deceit into the following: e'oh, my
brethren, the snowiest shirt-front may con-
ceal an aching bosom, and the stiffest of all
FOUNDERS eHcircle throat that has many
bitter pill to swallow"
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

A close student of the Bible suggests that
there is reason for supposing that one OF
the descendants of Aaron. the High Priest,
was native of Ohio. See Ezra VII, 4,
which reads: s'The son of Zerahiah, the
son of Uzzi. the son of Ia Bukki. !"
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

A very little boy, who at night had been
repeating the Lords Prayer. was observed
to be. in deep thought. After meditaling
a while, he asked: Mamma, Is the daily
bread buLtered 90 :.
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

The hatred of the vicious viii do you
less harm than their conversation.
The Kanzas news., 1858-03-20

Fortune grows tired of always carrying
the same man on her back.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
vol. 81, NO. 81.
WHAT HAVE NEVER KNOWN.

have never known poor man 10 obtain
premium at a fair, where there was a rich man
to compete VITA him.
have never known Minister Of the Cos
pei to be called from higher to a lower sala-
ry.
have never kuown poor nap to be res
pected because he was poor.
have never known merchant to continue
bis conversation with poor man when rich
one enters his store.
have never known white-headed office
hunter to be very conver5ant with poor man
after the election.
| have never known any man to admit any
man better than himself.
have never knorn rich mau bul what
was respected for bis riches.
have never known a man to be better
than he should be.
| have never known fashion too ridiculous
to be followed
/ have never known systcm of religion too
absurd to find followers.
have never known tho order Of npture re-
Versed to please any man.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
AN AMUSING STORY.


Hooper, the editor Of an Alabama journal,
whose uame we now forget, but which has al
ways something in it to make US laugh, tells
the following yarn
Shall tell you a bit of story, having DO
connection with politics, this hot dry, weather Z
By permissicr-
Old Col. D, Of the Mobile district, was
one of the most singular characters ever known
in Alabama. He was testy and eccentric, but
possessed many fine qualities which were fully
appreciated by the people Of the district. Many
of his freaks are yet fresh in the memory Of
The sold ms" of Mobile. And all viii tell
that the Col, though hard to beat, was ence
tercible taken in by couple of legal tyros -
Geo. Woodward, believe, tells tie story, but
however that may be, it is in keeping with the
others related of the old gentleman.
Ii seems chat Col D had a lnlsunder-
standing with the two gentlemen alluded to
and was not on speaking terms with them; al
though all three of them were professionally
riding the same circuit pretty much together
The young ones, being well aware of the Col. s
irascible nature, determined when they left one
of the courts for another, to have some fun by
the way at his expense. They accordingly got
about half an hours start in leaving, and pre-
sently they arrived at dark, broad stream that
looked as though it might be dozen feet deep,
but was in reality, not more than as many in
ches. Crossing it, they alighted, and pulling
eff their coats and boots, sat quietly down to
watch for the old aTartar."
jogging along, at length came the old fellow.
lie looked first at the youngsters, who were
gravcly drawing on their boots and coats, as if
they had just had swim, and then looked at
the broad creek which rolled before him like
translucent star. Thc Col. was awfully puz-
zled.
sis this creek swimming!' he growled, af-
ter pause OF some moments.
No reply was made-the young men simply
mounted their horses and rode off some dis
tance and stopped to watch our hero.
Tho Col. slowly Invested himself of coat,
boots, pantaloous and drawers. These he
nicely tied up in his handkerchief and hung
them on the horn Of his saddle, then he re-
mounted, and as he vas a short, fat man, with
a paunch of rather inordnate size, rather in
adequate legs, face like withercd apple, ard
brown wig, there is no doubt be made an in :
terestiug picture as he bestrode his steed. with
the breeze holding gentle dalliance with the ex-
tremity of his only garment.
Slowly and cautiously the old gentleman
took the creek. Half a length and the water
was only fetlcok deep. Here his horse stopped
70 drink. A length aad half, and the stream
was no deeper. Thirty feet farther and de-
eided shoaliDgi
Here ol.C D .eined up
"There must" said he, ''be adj of deep
channel between this and the bauk-see how it
runs We'll dash through here"
sharp lash made the horse spring the vat
cry waste, and another carried horse and rider
TO the opposite bank
The creek was nowhere more than foot
deep.
A wild yell from the young uns' announced
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
their APPRECIATION of the sport as they gnllOped

their applobaton Of the sport as they gAlloped
away.
"I'Ii catch you, YOU -rascals," was
GROUND between Q oil. D-'s teeth. aud away
he galloped IN hoe pursuit, muttering ven
geance against his foes
On they sped pursuer and pursued. The
youngsters laughed, aud the Col. damning
with mighty emphasis, while his shit fu;tered
and cracked in the breeze like a loose flying
jb
On, on, aud the pursued reached farmhouse
on the roadside. Their passage stated flock
of geese from fence corner, with outspread
wings, elongated necks aud Kisses dire. His
horse swvfFed suddenly, and the Col. was en-
the ground in a most unromante heap, ,sslth his
brown wig lying by his side, and the bundle of
clothes scattered all around.
The white headed children of the house
came out FIRST, took distant view of the mon
ster as it seemed to them, and then returned to
report progress. After little the father of
The family came, aud the afflr being explained,
assisted the Col, in making his toilet-the Col.
swearing, aud the countryman laughing all the
while.
Dressed and mounted, our hero started off
with woful phiz, and was very soon out of
sight.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
ANCIENT DRXTERITY.

One of the early Kings OF Egypt being de-
sirous to secure his riches, commanded treas
ure house to be built; but the architect, intend
ing to have some share of the treasure, instead
of finishing the building completely, placed
Que of the stones in so artful manner that it
could be taken out and put in again by one
man. As be was prevented by death from ae-
camplisbing his designs, on his deathbed he
gave full instructions to his two sons how to
execute it, After they h.d often plumber
cd the King, who observed the gradual dimi-
mutton of bis wealth without being able to dis
cover how the thieves had access to it, finding
his seal upon the door always whole, ordered
several strong traps to be left in the treasury.
BY this means, one of the brothers was at last
taken; but finding it impossible to escape, he
pressed his brother to cut off his head, and re-
tire with it to prevent discovery.
The next morning, examining the success Of
his project, upon finding man without head
in the snare, he FASTENED home in the greatest
alarm aud confusion, but recovering himself,
he ordered the body to be exposed on the OUT
side of the wall of the building to the public
view, charging the guards placed around it to
observe the countenanees of the spectators and
to seize those who appeared sorrowful. The
surviving brother, urged by his mothers en-
treaties and threats of exposure, formed the
design Of CARRYING off his brothers body. Ae-
cordingly, driving bis thither, laden
with skins of wine, he found means, by the
stratagem of letting his wine run out, to iutox-
icate and stupefy the guards. While they
were in deep sleep, he shaved the right cheek
of each Of them by way of derision, and in the
middle of the night carried off the body on Que
of the asses.
This action still more astonished the King,
who beiug how more earnest to discover the
thief, ordered his daughter to receive the ad-
dresses of all suitors promiscuously, on condi-
ton that each should previously confess to her
the most ingenious actien he had ever commit
ted. The young man, resolving again to per-
pick the King, went to the palace to his daugh-
ter, and confessed TO her that he had cut off
bis brothers. head, aud afterwards carried off
tile body. When she then offered to lay hold
of him he stretched out 10 her the arm olea
dead man, which he had carried in underoSl
cloak (suspectlng the intentions OF =
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

A HIGHwAYMAN THRAsHED BY GIRL.
AS peasant-girl named Meaine Robert, daugh-
ter Of a small farmer neal Corbeil, France, was
proceeding to Essounes, lately, a man armed
with thick stick suddenly presented himself
and summoned her to give up her money. Pre-
tending to be greatly alarmed, she hastily
searched her pocket, and collecting some small
pieces Of coin, held them o0t TO the man, who,
without distrust, approached to take them; but
the moment he took the money, Melaine made
sudden snatch at the suck, and Wrestling it
from his hand, dealt him SO violent blow with
il across the head that she felled him to the
ground. She then gave him sound thrashing,
and in spite of his resistance, forced him to ac-
company her to the Commissery Of Police.
If all the ladies would act as spiritedly as
Miss Melaine, they might safely walk alone at
night, aud not compel ungallant grumb!ers to
escort them. We don't know however, that it
is not better there are not many Miss Melaines.
Husbands would have a hard time of it the
wives who now only use the tongue would use
the broomstick, and those who now flourish the
broomstick would get bolder and take to the
tongs.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
Two Boys Murdered by their Father
From tie Binghampton Repubiicen

From the BtnghamPton Republican,
A most shocking affair occurred in Maine VII
age, IN this county, about l6 miles from Bing-
hampton, on Friday afternoon, the 10th Instant
OiFeF Howard, man about 80 years old
maraered two Of his children by cutting their
ttfoafs With a razor. The circumstances of
ilass iamentable occurrence, as near as we can
learn, ars as follows Oliver Howard, the
mnfderer. lives 10 the village of Saisi.ne---has
wife and four children-two girls and two boys.
lis wife's mother had been staying a few days
a bis house, aud the day previous to the mur>
des, his wife and wife's mother went on visit
g the house OF the latter, taking with them the
tFu youngest children, the girls; leaving the
tWo boys, one aged six, the other four at
home.
About O'Clock on Friday afternoon How
Srd left the tannery of Mr.. Sanford. where he
worked, went to his house, and returned soon
after to the tannery. Not long after it was
discovered that the two little boys had been
ianrdered-their throats being cut with razor
Howard was Immediately arrested aud taken
before n. w. Eastman, Esq, Justice of the
Pence IN that town, for examination. The prs-
~sacF admitted that be committed .he double
anlrder, and waived an examination. The mur-
derer was brought to Binghampton last Eidaj
nisht, and lodged in Jail.
No reason was assigned BY the prisoner, We
sre Informed, for the act, wnen he was arrested
sSow that he is in jail for the horrid crime, he
says that be was in fear Of the Lord, aud
Thought that he was commanded by the Lord II
Kill his two boys. We think that this is mcr,
SFioage to escape punishment on the ground .
asasanity, and that Instead of having any com
manication from the Lord, he Was instigatec
hy The DeuH aud bis own bad passions t. CON.
init this most drDitish crime.
Howsrd formerly tended French's Sill OF
Castle Greek, and spregue' Mil near por
Crane. Ho also worked at Cod. Lewis Mill, il
fingkaaeton. some seven yeais ago.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

AN ALLEGoRY.- a venerable man tgiled
through the burden and heat of the day in cll-
tivating bis field with as own hand, and IN
strewing with his own hand the promising seeds
into the fruitful lap of yielding earth. Sud
denly there stood before him, under the shade
of huge linden tree. divine vision. The old
man was struck with amazement. 81 am Solo
mon," spoke the phantom in friendly voice,
''what are you doing here, old man2' elf you
are Solomon" replied the venerable lzborer,
show can yop ask tbisa In my youth you sent
me to tue ani saw its occupation, and learned
from thai insect 10 be industrious and to gatl.-
er. Wha; then learned am following to
this hour" ''Yoa have only learned half your
lesson," responded the spirit; ''go again to the
ant ard learn from that insect 10 rest in tbs
winter of your life, aud enjoy what you have
gathered up"
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
TILE BIBLE

s.TeI me where the Bible is, aud where it is
uot,' observes an American clergyman, who
has returned from tour on the Coufinent,
''snd will write moral geography of the
world, will show in all particulars, the phys
steal condition of the people. One glance of
your eye will iuform you where it is not. Go
to Italy; decay, degradation anl suffering,
meot you on every side. Commerce droops,
agriculture sickens, the useful arts languish-
There is a heayiness in the air; you feel eramp-
ed by some invisible power, the people dare
not speak aloud they walk slowly; the armed
police takes from the stranger his Bible; in The
book stores it is not there, or in form SO ex-
pensive as to be beyond the reach of the COM
mon people. The preacher takes no text from
the Bible. Euter the Vatican, apd inquire for
Bible, aud you will be pointed to some case,
where it repoSes among prohibited works of
D'derot, Rousseau and Voitaire. Bat pass over
the Alps into Switzerland, and down the Rhine
into Holland, and over the channel into Eng
land and Scotland, and what au amazing con-
trast meets the eye! Men look with an air of
independence, there are industry, neatness, in-
struction for children. Why this dffercuce?-
There is no brighter sky-thore are no fairer
scenes of naturc-but they have the Bible;
and happy are tue people who are in such a
case, for it is righteousness that exalteth na-
tion."
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
5elett poetrg
THE NoBLEMAN OF EARTH.

The truest nobleman Of earth,
Is he who loves to be
The first companion of the good,
The hero of the free.
Who works undaunted for the poor,
Who sees no rank in names
Whose hopes ascend to heaven in crowds,
Assp.rkS hy up from flames
Give me the nobleman of mimi,
Who loves noble causei
The right of Iabor's sturdy sons;
And Freedoms righteous laws
The hater of each evil scheme
A tyraut may advance;
"A giants strength about his heart,
Thoughts brilliant in his glance
| love the noble man of earth,
Who strives to bless the age;
Aud leaves glory that is caught
On history's faithful page
Whose name the millions love to lisp,
Truths sure unhiuching guest;
Who shines in love as does the sun
In palace Of the west
He's deathless as the mighty skies,
When jewelad through with stars
Could feel Gods beauty in blaze
Burst through his prison bars
No mandate from the tyIant breaks
His spirits upward bound
While high on every liberal creed
His name is hlazoncd round
And perjured kings may pass from EARTH
Their pomp and lustre fade;
But natures noblemAn uRcllsps
The cruel laws they've made.
His worsAipped monarch is his God,
he laaves name behind
Flushed with effulgence that reflects
His majesty of mind
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

NOVEL MARRIAGE FESTIVITIES AT WASH
INaToN.- On Saturday night last, yonng man
named Faucet, was married on Mar Wand Av-
enue, and while the occasion was being cele-
brated by few gathered friends, some ten or
twelvs gentlemen carne in, unlimited, and with
characteristic play fuhess struck the grooH over
the head with slang shot, ind blowing cut the
lights, proceeded to make merry after their own
fashion, by breaking the furniture and fright
ening the ladies present. After remaining as
long as they choose, they retired outside. where
they remained until about O'Clock, A. ~.
throwing occasional stones and brickbats at the
house. 1t is said that the groom knows the
captain q Of this pleasant party, lntua ying 80
due regard for his life in his new aos'ss
lation, refuses to inforu asass-t H''''
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

and while she supposed she had detained the
culpfit, be made his escape. The Kings re-
sentiment being now converted into admiration,
he Fgamised a pardon and reward 20 the person
whe robbed the treasury, if he would discover
hinssef The young man, upon this proclama-
tious immediately made himself known, aud
the King thereupon ace counting him superior in
dextarliy to any man then living, gave him his
daughter in marriage.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

A FEMALE PoIsoyER.- Caroline Frede.ica
Kathrina Schwartz has been arrested at Chica-
60, charged with poisoning her paramour at
Buffalo, some line since. She is woman Of
good education, ard stats tbat her father held
rank of Major General rnder the Duke of
Baden Baden, that for years size rode By his
side, arrayed in warhke habilmenis of the oih-
er sex, in which unwomanly character she vis-
tied Russia, Aigers, ana many other places,
anI terminated her career of soldier by getting
married and coming to America ten years ago.
She lived with her husband Sehwarts, at Dan
vile, N. y, for seven years, Hhal woman
from Europe, with three childrea, made her
appearance and set up prior claim to the
husband. The claim appearing TO be well
founded, Caroline left him, went to New York,
and made arrangements of convenience with
another man, with whom she started for Chi
cago. At Buffalo, it is alledged, she poisoned
him to obtain $500 in money which he had
with him.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
supERsTlTIoNs DlspELIEp.

With view of combating certain silly su-
perstitions which still exist, a number Of gem
temen Of Bordeaux haeeresoIyej to form them
selves into society, which shall be called the
ssSociety of Thirteen,n and which shall have
hanquets to be attanded by thirteen persoDs,
such bauquets always to be on a Friday, and a
peculiarly grand one to come off on the 18th
Friday of each year. The members, moreover,
will al each banquet upset the salt, which is
deomed uulacby and have undertaken to COM
mence all their important operations or FRI
day. In addition to all this, they offer to re-
ceive as members Of their society persons sup
posed h be afflicted aith what is called along
the coast of the Med;teranean the ssevil" and
who are generally summed because it is suppo-
sed that they do great harm to the persons
with whom they speak, unless the latter present
to them each land with the tBo middle fingers
and the thumb turned down.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

A CooL Casa newly arrived John Chi
nsnan, in Shasta, California. purchased some
ioe recently, and finding il very wet. lali /, out
to dry in the sun. On going TO look for il
again he found that ii had disappeared, apd
forthwith accused the whole Chinese neighbour
hood of larceny A general row was the
consequence,
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30
u. K,rs fadine flower under Humbol

~ ssss more affected BY it because it grew
saaeaih sssaa.eaih the stiff and cold bosom Of the icc,
than he would have been by the most gorgeous
garden bloom. So some single struggling
grace in the heart of one far removed from d.
vine Influences, may be dearer TO q ID than a
whole catalogue of virtues in the lite of one
more favored OF Heaven Beecaer.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

Horace Walpole tells story of Lord
Mayor of London in his time, who, having
heard that friend had had the small l-pox
twice, aud died of it, inquired if he died the
first time or the second.
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

young gentleman who has just NJ. caller,
little beauty, says 'sbe would haHateria that
but she is made of such PR
Nature couldn't
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

.ourn Budget thinks there has been
.giderable swire pulling" lately between
England and the United States.''
Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-07-30

ssMr. ----,1I wa"'
worth ..1. Ct hay nay can have it. Is il for your
f'&No, faint. It's for the boss. Dad don't
eat hay"
"Bil, spell cai, rat, hat, bat, with only one
letter for each word"
sit can't be did :"
"What you just ready to report verbatior
phoneticaly, and can't do that just look
here Q SO cat, 50 rat. so hat, 80 bat =