Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1858-10-29
THE GAZETTE.
EXTRACTS FROM PUNCH.
FRIDAY MORNING, OCTOBER 80, ls5

T%BLEGRArnIC ALPHABET.-Thc Lindley-
Murrays OF electricity are Lusy laying down
a new alphabet for the use Of the submarine
telegraph. Mrs. Trimmer says, that the
foundation for such an alphabet must te
principally mutes and liquids.
TIE COMET AND THE BRITISH ASSOCIATION.
SECTION, &c. SCIENTIFIC BuFFooNERY -
lecture Oh the subject OF The comet was &C.
livered by Professor Miller. The learned
gentleman said that comets were SO called
from coma, not a state Of inscnsib!iity, but a
head of hair; though a comet seemed to par
take more of the nature of a fox IN regard
to it's tail, which was u decided brush. The
denser portion Of a comet was termed
nucleus. or kernel; but here was a kcrnei
without a shell, which reminded him OF a
colonel in the army; and association OF iueas
suggested the remark that he present comet
was situated below Ursa Major and beneath
the Pole Star, e star which, on account VI
the Pole, must be a convenience 10 the "Fcst
Bear, whose climbing pro0en-lties were wei
known TO the melo 5ers Of the Geological! Sec
t;on of that Association. The orbit of a
comet was an elongated ellipse, which puzz ed
even American Astronomers to Calculate. iuo
revolutions OF some C0mets could te pfeu!c'-
ed With considerable certainty; AID perhaps
those comets might be compared to certalhoes-
potic States. HALEY vas the first to foretall
the temperance of a comet: aud has thus
achieved q lasting reputation among phiioso-
piers, which IL preferable to what DIR. Gar
lyle calls the temporary he!iei"Jah % Hun
KEYS. The present comet was banned Donatis
comet. as another is called Encke's comet,
after the name of It's first discOvoreF; anu,
though a comet was OF small use 20 It's own'
er, it gave him q title more iiiustrlons iGah
that OF comes, or count. The scientific acc
turer, whose discourse had been interrupted
throughout by indignant vas
greeted az it's conclusion with u storm OF his-
SEES and eroans, which be acknowledged -
taking @ sight at his audience, who, III return,
peited him with oraEge-peel.
NCTs FOR Poor MEN 1t casts a deal OF nc
ney to be rich, and j, is a question ii 80 much
is worth so little? After ali, is wealth worth
the cost, first in acquiring IT, next 10 supper
ting it, and lastly In bearing up uDaer IL,
when you have lost it?
EVENING Fashions Emily. Shall you
dress much tc-night, dear.
Lillian. No--as little as possible All
going to a ball.
%sgRESADE TO TIE COMET.
AIR-"Com'e gent!.'
Comet genteel!
Pray, how do you feel!
Is't annoying 10 bear
The popular stare.
You ale spied and pursued
In a manner most Iude,
For every night
We al Won take sight.
We watch your movements, Comet, as th"u3A
you were the Queen,
And stare YOU Oh: OF couEtenaEce wnene er
you're 10 be seen.
Comet, ladies grnteel
Can bear a good deal
In the way o! a stare,
Ii their faces are ialr;
But possibly you
Dislike being or view,
And perhaps our rude gazs
Makes you red IN The lace.
If you would 'scape OR staring, Comet wear d
veil;
Or get your friend the Dog-star to bite oil yo0r
tail.
After the inauguration of the statue OF Cir
Isaac Newton, ct Grantham, an elegant ban
ouet was given. An ericurean Wit was seat
ed opposite to a beautifully glazed ham-
Conversation arose upon the almost perfect
character of Newton, and it was pieasirsly
remarked, that intellect without virtue, could
not produce happiness. AT this moment
Lord Brousbam asked for a piece Of the slaz-
ed ham, the wit, answering with one speech
the moraliser and the nobleman, quoted
of parts allure thee, see how bacon snined."
PERI.
From Punch's Literary Anecdotes.
WoMAN's CONSTANT 1oRMENT.--Dust.
MANS GREATEST PLAGUE.-A Woman con-
tinualiy brushing the same.