Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1858-01-15
couRTING 1NIowA.

SOON 4AN" ANAO " 1s 4 ID
The following circumstance happened
in Cedar county. Iowa:
A certain young man having been out
on courting expedition came late on Sun.
day evening, and, in order to keep his
secret from his young acquaintances, de-
termined to be at home bright. and early
on Monday morning. Mounted on his
horse, dressed in fine white pants. and
other 6xings in proportion, he arrives at
the residence of his inamorata, where he
was kindly received, and his horse being
pl ploperly taken care Of, being turned into
pasture for the night. The night passed
away, and three o'clock in the morning
arrived. Three o'clock was the time for
him to depart, so that he might arrive be-
fore his comrades were stirring. He sal
lied forth to catch his horse, but here was
the difficulty-7lhe, grass high and loaded
with dew. To venture in with white
pants on, would rather take the starch
out of them and lead to detection. 1t
would not do to go in with his white un
mentionables, so he quickly made his re-
solve. He carefully disrobed himself
of his whites and placed them in safety
on the fence while be gave chase with un
screened pedals through the wet grass
after the horse. u....-j
Returning to the fence where he had
safely suspended his lilly white unmen.
lion bles-O Horrible Dictu what a
sight met his eyes The field into which
his horse had been turned was not only
"a horse PASTURE" but "a calf pasture,
too, and the naughty calves, attracted by
. ba b1t., 40 ha nod hot kar
themselves to it :; and calf-like, had eaten
them upl only few shreds-just enough
to indicate what they once had been !!
What pickle this was for nice young
man to be in ..-... .... .--a
1t was now near daylight, and the
trainers were up and about, and our hero
from home with no covering for his
travelling apparatus" 1t would not do,
to go back to the house of his .lady.love.
neither could he go to town in that condi>
ton. There was only one resource left
him. and that was 70 secrate himself in
the bushes until the, next night and then
get home under covert OF darkness. ..,- j.
Safely hid be remained under, the pros
lection of the bushes for some time, and
it may be imagined that his feelings to-
noAAo bl4S SAlA hlh4 hSIS hOb Va hhSS hIOSb
friendly character but ere long, his Sc;
clusion was destined to be intruded upon.
By and by, the boys who had been out TO
feed the calves, returned with the rem.
uants - Of the identical white garment
which adorned the lower limbs of the late
visitor, They were mengled and torn to
shreds An inquest was Immediately
held over them. Some awful fate had
befallen the young man. The neigh
/ bors were summoned to search FOR
the missing corpse, and the posse with all
speed set out with dogs and arms. The
pasture was thoroughly secured and then
the adjacent thickets, when 10 and be-
hold our hero was driven out from his
lair by. the keen scent ofthe dogs, all safe,
alive and well, minus the linen. B.. ~
An explanation then ensued at the exS
pense Of our hero, but he was successful
in the end, and married the lady, and is
now living comfortably in one of the
flourishing towns of Iowa. ...- .s....
A Cool H1r.-Mr. Buchanan is said
to be fond of quiet thrust at the weak
ness Of humanity. An illustration Of this
may be found near the close Of his mess
sage to Congress. where he congratulates
that patriotic body upon " the late excel
lent law allowing salary, instead of a
per diem. to members of Congress. where
by the expense and Inconvenience of q
called session will be greatly reduced"
The innocent simplicity with which he
assures himself OF their active sympathy
in a measure which will make them work
onE fbs worth nf THAR wa0as .;s rafresb>
ing to behold. a" '7'Est H11
~An honest Dutchman, in training
up his son in the way fe should co.; fre.
qutntly exercised him in Bible lessons,
On one of these occasions hel asked him;
s''Who vas dat would not shleepo mil
Botiphefss vifed?''ai.u s-Essq sal .i.!s-5a
l"Shossph4" 81 tEs.t sgisspg "
OATS a2goot poy. Veil. vat was de
reason he would not sleep NIT iher?s .ise