The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1858-05-29

respective blood connections, Very fruitful
causes Of disturbance between husbands and
wives are the relatives Of the married pair
Not unfrequently tho parents Of the hus-
band are brought into his family and not un-
. frequently those Of the wife, Doubtless there
are instances IN which il Is impossible to get
along without difficulty with these, huth you
/ bayc fHlly upprehended my course of reason
/ ing with you, and admitted It's validity, there
is but one course foryou 10 pursue. You are
one, The husbands parents are the w(es
parents, and the wiie's parents are the par
cnts of the husband You are 10 receive and
/ treat them as your own--not with ooustraint
and as matter Of duty, but willingly and
ahcctionately. You are to learn to love and
respect thcm,--to bear with their frailtics, 10
comfort them in their passage to the tomb, 10
/ treat them IN no sense as dependents, and to
make them feel that they ARE not only wei
come 10 your kindly offices, but that they
have a right 10 the home which they have
with you. You are young, and they are old.
/ Il is for the honor df your companion that
/ his or her parents have support Mt his or
/ her hands, and what is your companions hon
or is yours. Besides this world H. world
Of corporations, more nicely adapted and
more certain than you know. The time will
pass away, and the children now on your knee
will have grown To manhgod aud woman
hood, and will have chosen their companions,
as their fathers and mothers chose theiis be-
fore them. The home which you enjoy may
he broken up Your companion will be TAX
cn from YOU and your only resor may be
the home Of your child. The treatment
d which YOU would wish to receive from your
soEs wife, or your husbands daughter, is pre-
ciscly the treatment which you nov owe to
those who hold TO you the relation which you
will then sustain to them
The same rules which govern YOU in regard
to the parents should extend to the circle of
your other relatives. Or course your ability
to maintain dependencies consideration !
but regard personal and family honor ns
most nseparably involved in this thing a
son or daughter who, with the power of
maintaining without impossible sclf-sncrifcc
father or mother, allows them TO finish
their life in an aims house or % live on the
charity Of those upon whom they haye no
special claims, is brute There arc5& few
such miserable creatures in the world, who
ought to bee booted at and cut by all decent
people. In measure the same thing is true
; of all family relatives. II is matter Of per-
snnnl aud fanAili nFale 49, he,.. said. IL Is
something more than this. The poor we
have always with u.s. and We owe duty to
them, unless we ourselves are equally poor
but when a man has poor relatives who must
be dependent, more or less upon some one,
it is rs if Gods finger had kindly pointed
= out to him the very objects upon which his
bcnciactions should be bestowed
49, il.i 4.il4af= =saEans doc
,rine for some minds. am aware that rela.
tivcs are often proud as we'll as poor that
they will be dependent rather than labor
l that they become insuficrable drones and
d bores, and haunt your homes with a most Of
c fensiye and yeNatous presence. There
| ought to be some short method of treating
such, but do not possess it. IL YOU canno
Z make them useful, there are several ways OF
T. making them uncomfortable which may bt
safely left to the invention and discretion OF
+ the suffering parties. My plea is for thor
Is ough identification of family feeling and fam
ily pride between husband and wife. If i
IS entail disagrecoblc and unjust burdens
h through the laziness or extravaganza Of de
e pendent relatives, it is a msfortunei ant
T. misfortuncs are incident to all relations
IS Better bear them than leave your motive
IS open to suspicion, or bring disgrace upoi
y your family name.
S l cannot close this letter better than b.
1t saving word or two upon the subject o.
4 servants. The general proposition that tn
e quality of the servant is dependent upon tn
ID quality of the mistress is sound one. If
1t woman who frets at and scods her servant
he ever has good servant, it is in spite of tn
ID treatment she receives. In order TO be
Ii good mistress, it is necessary to believe in
ie few fundamental truths, which may be brieh
IN stated as follows First, servants are huma
-y beings, and, consequently, have souls sec
s. ond, servants, having souls, are consequent
'd controlled by the motives which addres
ly themselves TO common humanity hirt
o. being human servants, they have right
or which no amount of service money can buy
IN and fourfh, transcendant. intellectual endov
n ments, physical development of fifty-hor'
N power, the broad circle of the Christian grt
e- ces and virtues, fautless disposition,
be knowledge of French cookery, and elegar
II habits cannot be obtained for nine Yankt
DIS sAilinas a week. A mistress admitting gc
r. orally the truth of these propositions possess
IS a basis for securing service that shall be re
G sonably satisfactory to her.
nd There is quite too much of the feelir
nd among mistresses that they have right
= .Se use servant as fast boy uses a hired hors
n They ARE to get the most out of them tn