Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1858-03-20
Pot Durkan's Pigeons.

Many years ago. whan peace had provoked
partial influx of Frenchmen into Ireland, IL
happened that one arrived at kilaerhaddy,
and sojourned with host whose name was
Pat Durkuu His FIRST breakfast there had
been discussed much to his satisfaction, and
it noa only remained to select the materials
for dinner from Pats ample bill of fare, pre-
vious to an intended excursion TO the neigh
boring islands. Pat was summoned.
"Vat you have for dinnierei I" demanded
the Frenchmah.
"What havn't /, your honor" returned
Pat "Wby. there's roast an billed, an stew
ed an fried, no murphies to the back iv that
again ain its seldom the likes iv them cras
ses Frenchman's inuzze in his own coun-
thry," he added mentally.
Vat you have mrnagerr" quoth the
Frenchman.
"Arrah, he aisy, your hcnor,' replied Pat,
"the divil resave the taste iv NANCY meat is
under the same roo! wild ye, barrin the ould
she dog, an she's neither here nor there In
attn you know.
"Misericorde !" CALCULATED NJ Monsieur, some
what discomposed, and not comprehending
the intent Of Fbraseology, "Manger, say
Manger"
you need not be callin' body names in
| gibrish, for all that" said Pat, "an' Ill take
my Bible oath into the bargin, that the sor-
row bit of mangy.or neazly mate is under the
same tbatch wild ye."
"Diable ~ cried Monsieuo, nearly out OF pa
| tience' "for dinniere say dnDiers ~
Och, regarding the dinner, is it p said
Pat; "mesha, sure told your honor oil
about that long ago. We've roast, an billed,
an an stewed, an fried but if you want to
know all the inns and outs iv the business,
why here's the bill and your honor may pick
and choose for the matter iv that"
Pat lugged out his bill OF fare, which had
been prepared for the occasion by his better
half and the contents of which be was as ut
terly ignorant of as his guest, before he had
petueed them. 1t is matter OF speculation,
whether the sum total could at any period
have beer made out within circuit OF some
guest.
"Ros bif?" enqured The Frenchmap, as his
eyes caught the first item.
Thunder an ounsw thought Pat, "fm
dished now altigider iniirely-Roast beef,
your honor! troth, thin, would not recon-
mind it, bekase you see its long killed-long
enough" lie added, mentally, seeing ss how
bad luck to the taste iv dead cow stared me
in the face since ould Moileen's leg last
Christmas"
"Veal !" rejoned NJ Monsieur.
| Nor that neither" said Pat; "t's only
slink, your honor-slink, indeed" he contin-
ued to himself, ''for its not dead yet"
pigeons" enumerated the Frenchmnn,
with the true nasal twang, annulibg the fl.
nails.
"Och cure that's not in it," cried Pat /;
"whnt the dickens does he mean at all, at oil,
wild his pusbong."
pigeons" reiterated the guest.
| nnh hot honor ra n On m
you are making iy NE ?" said Pat.
"Pigeous," reioined the Frepchnau, rails
ing his tone.
"By the hockey, have it," cried Pat, after
a vehement scratching Of his carroty pate
IAN its myself that can shut your honor to o
hair-the pushsens Faith its lucky thought
iv it-whllelnh y! And he made his axit in
high glee with Ss successful Interpretation.
| 1t happened that upon this Identical morn
ing Pats domestic cat had achieved her ac-
couchment the event OF which had been an
increase to his family to the extent Of five tine
thriving comey kittens, or pusheens, as Pat
would term them ID his Datiye parlubce.--
One of those was, in accordance, as he ina
gined, with bis guests directions, brought to
the knife, 6ismembered, !ricasseed, and, in
proper time duly served up for dinner. The
dish proved savoury; Monsieur smacked bis
precions article was ordered-on the next day
sn cncOre-ou the next de capo; and so on
until, the sixth. when Pats "pusheens" were
exhausted, be made his appearance before his
guest with au unuaually sombre cast Of visage
Pigeons? ?" said the Frenchman.
"All gone, your honor" returned Pat ; "ar
the borrow one more in the party for love 0,
money barrin the ould cat, that's been nous
in here these four years come next Patrick
mas"
The cat calculated the Frenchmah.
"What else ?" cried Pat
"Catp re.echoed the Frenchmau, with {
visible emotion OF the stomach and counter
auce.
Fat opened his mouth, scratched his head
and looked ashast. Monsieur stormed, spa
and raved by turns. Pat scratched, ant
scratched again, and at length an ecluircisse
n,eat took place.
We cannot say precisely whether OF mo-
the stomach pump had been invented before
this period, aud consequently, whether it wat
put in requisiton on this occasion; but it il
certain, that sounds and symptoms woult
, have evinced that such nn instrument hac
been used effectually upon the interior 0
Monsieur Frenchmau who had been luSuria
ting upon, and did not fail to recolect, to thu
last day of his life, Pat Durkan's pigeons.