Monmouth weekly herald. [volume] (Freehold, N.J.) 1854-1860, 1858-11-11
family GirtIe,
Sally JONES.

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vicinity, had a daughter. as pretty aud
buxom a lass az ever thpmped buttermilk
in a churn and whether yoa saw her
carrying eggs to market OF the flea bit
ten mare, or helping to stir apple butter
at q boiling frolic, or making a long reach
at a quilting, or sitting demurely in the
log meeting house on a Sunday-in short.
whenever you saw her, she always looked
as pretty, if not prettier, than she had
ever done before.
Notwithstanding her attractions, it will
scarcely be credited that Sally had reach
ed the mature age Of eighteen without
a sutton. Admirers, nay, lovers, she had
by the score and whenever liquor was
convenient, many a sober youth go.
drunk because of her. And many a sigh
ing bachelor would willingly have given
his riding horse, or even u share in Dads
farm for her.
There was indeed, no lack of will on
their part the difficulty was in muster
ing up courage to make the proposal
Mankind seemed. for once, to be impress
ed with a proper sense of its own I'M
worthiness.
Now, far be it from any one to infer
from this that Sally was prudish or unap.
p~roachaele, On the contrary, she was
as good humored, as comedy, and disposed
to be as loving as she was lovable.
Poor Sally it is a great misfortune
for a girl to be too handsome almost as
great as to be too ugly.
There she was, sociable and warm,
hearted as a pigeon, amiable as a turtle
dove, looking soft encouragement, as
plainly as maiden modesty permitted, to
her bashful company of admirers, who
d%waddled about her twiddling their
thumbs, biting the bark of their riding
switches, and playing a number of other
sheeplsh tricks, but never saying a word
to the purpose.
Sally was entering on her nineteenth
year, when she was one day heard to OBJ
serve that men were the meanest, slowest,
c~owardist, or '~nariest creatures in short,
good for nothing but to lay under an
apple tree with their mouths open, and
wait until the apple dropped into them.
This observation was circulated from
mouth to mouth, and, like the riddle of
the Sphinx, was deeply pondered by
Sally's lovers. If any of them had wit
enough to solve its meaning, certainly no
one had pluck enough to prove the an
swer.
Not of this p~oor-spirited crowd was
Sam Bates, a stalwart youth, who stood
in winter, six feet two inches in his stock.
ings, lin summer he didn't wear ANY,
Sam was not handsome, in the ordinary
sense of the term. He was frerkled. had
a big mouth and carroty hair. His feet
but no matter-he usually bought mum.
Der fourteen and a half because they fit
ted him better than seven or Fights.
Sam was a wagon maker by profession,
owned a .hourishing shop, and several
hundred acres of u%nimproved land, which
secured to him the reputation Of indepen.
dence. For the rest he was a royster-
ing blade, a good rider, a crack shot
with a rifle, and an accomplished fiddler.
Bold to the confines of impudence, he
was a great favorite of the fair with a
heart as big as his foot, and a fist like a
sledge hammer, he was the acknowledged
cock OF the walk, and preu9 chevelier of
the pine hill country.
Mr.. Bates met Sally Jones for the first
time at a quilting and at sixty seconds
after sight he had determined to court
her. He sat beside her as she stitched.
and even had the audacity to squeeze her
hand under the quilt. Truth is mighty
and must be told.
Although Sally1did not resent the i'm
pertlnence by a stick with her needle.
she was not half SO indignant as she
ought to have been. | dare not saw she
was pleased, but perhaps | should not be
far from the truth if [ did. 1t is unde.
nlable that the more gentle and modest
a woman Is, the more she admires cour-
age and boldness in the other sex.
Sally blushed every time her eyes met
those OF her new beaux, and that was as
often as she looked up.
AS tor Sam the longer he gazed the
deeper he sunk in the mire of love. and
by the end OF the evening his heart and
MS confidence were both completely
overwhelmed.
As he undertook to see Sally home he
felt numbness in his joints that was
entirely new to him, and when he tried
TO make known his sentiments as he had
previously determined, he found his heart
was SO sWelled up that it closed his throat.
and ne couldn't utter a word.
What a darned sneak was | p groan
ed Sam, as he turned that night on
his sleepless pillow. Whats come
over me, that I cant speak my mind to
a pretty gal without a chokin o, Lord,
but she Is too pretty to live on this airth.
Well, I'm a goin' to church with her to-.
morrow !; and if | don't fix matters afor
| go back, then drat me.
1t is probable Sam Bates never heark.
ened to the story Of " Rasselas, Prince Of
Abysslnia," or he would have been less
credalous while thus listening to the
whispers OF fancy, and less ready to take
1t Ior granted that the deficiencies of the
day would be supplied by the tomorrow.
Tomorrow came, and in due time Mr..
Bates, tricked off in a bran new twelve
dollar suit of Jews clothes was on his
way to meeting beside the beautiful Sally.
His horse bedecked with q new saddle.
with brass stirrups, looked as gay as his
master.
As they rode up to the meeting house
door, Sam could not forbear casting a
glance at the crowd of Sally's adorers,
that stood around filled with modification
and envy, at his successful audacity.
SallyDs face was roseate with pleasure
and bashfulness.
"Stop a minute, now, Miss Sally /; Tll
just git down and lit ye off! |"