Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1858-11-05
IoE WElFRI.s.,llMrEEnnINti5.5o

firm. decided. and prompt, not caring
the snap otthe finger, for either the apSI
Plause of friends or the muttsfing of enc !
mics. He is perhaps, the most devoted
man 70 the law in all creation, and has
his head so full of what he terms judicial
talk, thai he not unfrequently finds him,
se4fmaRing learned charges and passing
scntences'outsit1e of the court room. liz -
On a recent occasion, the Judge was
called on to- exercise the power and auE.
Ihority in him vested in the case OF a
young couple who desired to have their
hands. united in the holy bonds Of wed>
lock. OF course he consented 70 perform
the pleasing duty. and, on'the appointed
evening. was promptly on hand at the
house at which the affair was TO come of.
The room was crowded by the beauty aud
fashion OF the town, and none looked
more dignifed or happ5. than the Judge
himself, who was dressed within an inch
Of his life. '.~
1t is customary. on occasions Of the
kind referred to, for the good folks ofsthe
mountain towns, to pass round the wine
quite freely and. they consider it no.h arm
for one to manifest his interest in the
joyous event by getting 'lively.' The
Judge is an ardent admirer OF the fair sex,
having, ia the course Of his life, led the
third one to- the altar Ho3use his own
language. he is q great believer in we'd
dngs,' and that he should get a little
mellow amid the scenes of the evening,
was not TO be wondered at by those WIN
knew him intimately. d. s..-- .-.
The wine had passed round and round
and round. The music had ceased
The time for making Joseph Bowers and
Nancy Hankens one. had arrived. Every
heart thrObbed with the most delig htful
emotions. The young gentlemen desire
GUS TO know how Joe would stand it, and
the young ladies were anxious to see how
Nance would suffer the anxious shock
Others, again. who had closely observed
the turn of affairs during the evening
fixed their attention upon the Judge to
see how he would come out Of the scrape.
At length, the trying moment was an
nouEced. the Judge arose very cautiously
from the chair, which he bad occupied in
one corner OF the room, and casting his
eye over the company, he signed cut to
the Sheriff of the county, who was pres
ent as an invited guest. The Judge had
inbibed just enough to make him forget
tue VI MS BUSINESS lie was Iull
OF Judicial Talk and required nothing
bnt the presence of the Sheriff to start
him. Looking sternly at the officer, he
shouted:
Mr.. Sheriff. open the Court and call
ORDER
Ageneral litter followed this command,
IN the midst Of which the Sheriff took the
Court gently by the arm and led him to
his seat In the corner, at the same time
informing the august parsonage of the
mistake.
Every thing now bid fair for pleasant
and sudden determination of the affair,
until another annoyance, which was
nothing less than the absence of the bride.
groom. was observed. IL turned out
that he had just stepped across the street
to Join his friends in parting drink, but
before he returned a col1solooded way
whispered in the ear of our fogy the
cause of delay in the proceedings. In
stantly the chair in the corner moved, and
in that direction all eyes were fixed.
Mr.. Sheriff, slowly bawled The Judge,
bring Joe into court OIL supenar'-the
Judge had his own way OF pronouncing
the word-then addressing the bride,
who stood in the foreground. and hung
her head in deep confusion. he added
'l'spose you'er the plaintiff. don't
take on. Innocence and virtue will be
protected by this here court
This was the saddest blunder of all
The Judge was again made to see his
mistake, and would have been consider.
ably Set back. had it not been for a cor
receive in the shape of forty drops of the
CFIItPr which h.. SpsRon,l,,
In few moments all was ready in
right down earnest. The bridegroom
had arrived. full Joy. The company
pressed forward, The excitement was
intenee. He evidently felt every inch, a
Judge.
j J o e-B BIB over s. commenced
the man of law,in that distressing style of
speech, with which he wcs invariably
troubled when r&Gcr tie Influence OF
liquor. j j o-e o,w RS. stand up
Have y-y-you anything to s-s-say WV
why sen t tence.-'
Stop. stop, stop. Judge, shouted the
Sheriff from the back part of the room
You are not going to hang the man, but
marry him.
The Judge drew a long breath and
bIlnked rapidly. but stood his ground
well Recovering himself he, proceed
J Joe BIB overs. do y.you t-take
Nancy H-darkens for y-your wife, SO h
b help y-yOu God p
There was troubled effort, and Joe
nodded assent.
N.N-Naucy Harkens. it now remains
for this &C Court TO-
Here the Sheriff again interrupted the
Jud sc reminding him of the reel business
of the evening.