The Tiffin tribune. [volume] (Tiffin, Ohio) 1848-1859, 1858-09-10

Rg-Tbo prettiest lining for bonnet is
smiling face.
EC-The woman who has bad hus-
band makes a confident Of her mind.
RESnook's wife likes to mafe bread,
because she says il cleans her hands so
beautifully.
Rg The pomp and circumstances Of a
well furnished table covers a multitude OF
defects.
RB' B'lIeorts--Liule red things that
both men and " women play with for mon.
Icy.
Rg-A late traveller, IN speaking Of Aus
tria, says that one-half the people are uu-
der arms to keep the other half in goal
Rg-Fishermou must possess extmordi-
nary medical powers, for they never at
tempt to cure fish until IL is dead.
'Tis well, some people say, that man
has not microscopic eye, as his sins
would stare him too broadly in his face,
RS-A girl recently stole pair of
gloves. giving as a reason that she only
| NtaANH w Wv hNA hN"N W.
Rg-It is about as hopeless a task to
get rich woman to live a life Of common
sense, as il is to get rich man into the
Kingdom Of heaven.
EUIf you are in a hurry, never get be-
hind couple who are counting. They
want to make so much Of each other that
they wouldn't move quick il they were
going to funeral.
/ RD-Seueca, the famed writer upon
morals and moderate desires, was said to
be great usurer, possessing seven mil
lions Funny to write on moderation up
5 on a table Of goldl
REWhen Lady Wallace sent polite
note to Mr., Harris, Of Convent Garden,
Offering him comedy for nothing. he OBJ
served that her ladyship knew the exact
value Of il.
: RE-Wore but human beings always
? that which they are in their best moments,
5 then should we know here already on earth
n a kingdom Of heaven, of beauty and good
moss.
GTAn Irishman remarked to his com
1 pauion, on seeing lady pass:
d "Pat, did you ever see so thin woman
as that before?"
g "Thin," replied the other; "bothera
90 ton, have seen woman as thin as TIVE
Of her put together, l have"
Bg-"Do you believe in second love
NisIner hIvS SuaJo0"
"Do believe in second love? Humph
il man buys a pound Of sugar, isn't
sweet? and when it's gone, don't he war
another pound? and isn't that sweet, toe
e Troth, Murphy, | believe in second love.
(, Rg-'T see," said young lady, eth
some printers advertise blank declaration
for sale; l wish l could get one.
q "Why?" asked the mother. Because
Il ma, Mr.. G-is too modest to ask m
q to marry him, and perhaps il could dl
= = a blank declaration ho would sign it,"
RT-"Pm terribly distressed, " said
clergyman Of Indifferent reputation 70
), sincerity to rough noighbor, 80 hea
d you swear So"
IT ooh, don't let that distress YOU" sal
the neighbor; al swear great deal, an
''4you pray great deal, but neither of u
ie means anything byi it.
II Rg-A quaint writer observes, that a
g. seventeen, with reference to her beau,
IS woman inquiries, Which is heY Az TWEEN
,s ty, grown more ambitious, Who is he
:, At twenty five, the world having produC
ed its effects, What has he? But at thil
g ty, in despair, Where is he?--Is il tru
ladies?
RS-"How old arc you?" said a magi
trate to German, arraigned before hin
10 81 am dirty"
= "ALd how old is your wife7"
"Mine wife is dirty two"
50 "Then sir, you are very dirty coupl
ID and wish to have nothing further to
l. with either of you"
D. BS-Some newspaper correspondent
a remqIs-asks the question "What
H. MANI" and then answers it in the follow
= ing somewhat truthful although not vel
liattering style: "a thing to waltz witt
DC a thing to Airt with, to take one to plac
or of amusement, to laugh at, TO be Marie
en- to. to pay ones bills, to keep one con
n. fortably."
ed G1-A man having built large hou
was at loss what 70 do with the rubbis
10 His steward advised him to have p
n dug large enough to contain il, "Ar
ve what" said he, smiling, 'shall do wi
ire the earth that dig up from itY''
n. which the steward, with great gravity, !
- piled, "HAyE THE PIT LARGE ENOUGH
'' HOLD ALL"
= RT-An Irish counsellor having lost /
.n- cause, which had been tried before thr
'm Judges, one OF whom was esteemed a We
bic able lawyer, and the two others but ve
,bt Indifferent, some Of his brother barriste
>, we're merry on the occasion. eve
" now" says he, "who could help it, VIII
there were a hundred judges on d
" benchP "a hundred judges?-The
nal were but three" "By 81. Patrick"
Of piled he, "Ihere were ONE and TWO oYP
Frs"
an. R9-In one of Caroline Gilman's roma
is oes. library copy this passage was mai
,io- ed aud much thumed:
stfpLa-. q. - .ksoof an haautifttl IN