American Lancaster gazette. [volume] (Lancaster, Ohio) 1855-1860, 1858-08-26
THE FIRST ICE CREAM.

by the Rev DR.. Freemsn. Who died few
days since, Bishop Of Arkansas aud Tex-
rs.
If we knew to whom. orto What, to
give credit for the following hit, we cer-
taiuly would doit. Il comes to rs with.
out any intimation Of it's origin. aud We
give itplace as lddicrously characteristic.
II purports to be An account Of Ethan
Spikes First and Last Visit to Portland:-
'Portlar Is the oil .6redest place ever
seed. l was down there in '33, to see
little about my goin' 10 the Legislator.
and such time as l had. y d never heer'd
tell on. Did l ever tell you about the ice
cream scrspe had?
We answered in the negative and he re-
simed!
wall, I'd ben down thar two or three |
days. pokin' in ever hole. an thO't ia
seed ever thing thar was to be seen. But
one day towar's sun down l was goin' by
a shop In Middle street that looked won
derfuily slick-there was all manner Of
candy an peppermints an what nots at
the windows. An Il en- thar wat sighs
with gold letters on to them, hsngin'
round the door. tellin' how they sold Soda,
Mead an Ice Cream thar. / says 10 my
self, ] have heern good deal about this
ere ice cream, an row il / don't see what
they's made Of So / puts my hands into
my pockets, an walked in kinder careless,
and says TO chap standin behind the
counter
do you keep any ice creams here?
Yes sir says be, how much II you
have?'
considered mint, says l "a pint.
SIR y '''- ....'.5 = E ~ az
The young fller's face swelled out, an
he liked to have laughed right out, but ar
ter a while he aEkedA- :, -'''' q
bid you say pint. sir?'
'sar,in. say I, but p'raps YOU don't
retail, so / don't mind takih' a quart
| Wall don't you think the fell snorted
right out Tell yer what, itmade me feel
sort a pisoh, an / gave him look that
made, him look sober in about mint, an
when l clinshed my fist and looked SO at
him, (here Mr.. Spike favored us with a
most diabolical expression. he hauled in
his horns about the quickest an handed
me pint O. the stuff as peflite as could be.
Wall | tasted mouthful oft, an found il
cool as the uor,h side o o'Bethel hill in Jan
uary.y I'd half mind to spit it out but
ljest then Iseei the confeclioner chap grin
MIN behind the door. which riz my spunk
Gall smash it all, thinks !, III net let thai
white -livered monkey think I'm afeard=--
I'll eat the pIaguey stuff if it freezes my
inards. / tell yer what, I'd rather skinn'd
a bear or whipped 2 wild cat. but | went i
II eat the whole In about mint. q. :
| 'Wallin about quarter Of an hour |
, began to feel kinder gripy about here. con
} tinued Ethan. po titing to the lower parts
} of his stomach, 'an kept on feelin' no bet
ter very fast, till at last it seemed as tho
I'd a steam ipgea sawin shingles in me
, | sot down on a cheer. and bent myself ~
: like a hut-cracker, thinkin,, II grin ant
, bear it; but 1 couldn't set still twisted
, and sauiIned aboutlike an angle worm OF
, hook, till at last the chap as gin me ths
, cream. who had been lookin' on suikerin'
says he to ne. j -, g,...,s7 .s.5s
Mister, says he, what aiis 5efs' d
Ais mel says I, that ere stuff O. your'r
is freezin' up my daylights,' says / 81.
You eat too much says he.
4 tell yer, ! didn't screamed 4; ! know
. what's nuff. an what's too much withou
3 askin' you, an If you dom leave Of
. snickerin' II spile your face ..t.,5 i,
Q He cOttoned right down, n'said b
. didn't mean any burt. an ask me if hadn'
better take some gin. ! told him woult
b so ! took purity good horn and left th'
Q shop. - ,.,, n,yu.,,1, b,
o 'Arter / got ont continued Etban,
o Q felt better for aminit or 30, but / bsd'n
. gone fnr afore the gripes took me again; s.
Q went into ano her shop. an took SOM
o more gin; then l sot down on the Stat
o House steps, an tbarrI sot an sot, bu
D. didn't feel mite better. Ibegun to thin
Iwas goin' 10 kick the bucket. and then
70 thought Of father an mother and Of oil
~ ~ spanker-tha.'s fathers hoss---and when
% thought should never see them again.
g so fairly blubhered But then | happened /,
. look up and see half dozen boys grin
g i'm and lar6n' at lie, tell yer what. it ri
70 my dauder--tbat had got down below ner
rite up agin. L sprung at 'em like
80 wild cat, hoIlefin' out I'd shake their gis
50 yards out, an the way the. little devil
50 50 scampered was caution to nobody. b.
90 after the 'ciiement of the race was owe
% felt wus sgin. and couldn't help gre ar
= 3 in and screchin' as went along.
80 80 At last thought I'd 60 to the theatr'
Ct. but afore got there. the gripes got
slfopg that l had to go behind meetiI
house and lay down and holler. Arter
GO GO while got up an went into shop an q
% half dollars worth Of billed listers wit
90 four pickeled oowoumbers. and wound u
ay with glass Of brandy. Then | went in
= the theatre an seed the plays, but I felt
that | couldn't see any fun 10 'em. for
es don't think the listers and the cowcumhe
he dous me any good. sOt down. laid dow
he and stood up, but still It went on. grip
q. o,;na oroanad all the time nnNonce