Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1858-10-01
A Short Patent Sermon.

Short Patent Sermon.
BY DOW,
Ny text for today is contained in these words:
"Mysterious element, oh, water thou
Art part and parcel of myself, and all
MY HEARERS: x X For the last two minutes
have been away from myself, important mission
have been upon interesting wild goose chase after
fugitive idea Perhaps some of you have, more than
once tried to home truant thought or idea-have
had it just pop its head into your memory and then be
Oft for good It's very aggravatng that the thing
of much consequence in ITSELF but because you have
made up your mind to its capture. Let it go; can
proceed without it, any of its relations. Wordsten
thousand thanks to their nventor-I still command
my platoons companies regiments brigades and dvis-
ions.
My carnaqueous brethren Water is a singular ele-
ment Like the air. it is in reality both invisible and
intangible and yet possessed ofmost marvellous powers
Like the air. you think you it, but you do not you
imagine you feel it, but you don't only by its force
pressure. 1t is perfectly transparent and therefore, you
can see through its mystery just as well as can.
This neat little earth which we have the honor and
happiness of peopng, of land
and water-and We twolegged mortals, are the biped
terrapns that crawl upon its surface. About three
fourths of it is nothing but water you may perceive
when you happen to get too much of it mixed with your
punch Where there is much water and so little land
you would naturally suppose that very pOshy mess
would be the result but such wouldn't be the case
Your own bodies also threequarters water and yet
they considerably frmer than made mush. Here
in lies the great mystery of the subtle fluid.
AS water my brethren, is the principal ingredient in
the human SYSTEM are led to inquire to what con-
stitutes the minor portion That depends altogether
upon circumstances
An Englishman is principally mutton and water.
The lrshman is made up of potatoes, potheen and
water.
The Scotchman consists of oatmeal and water.
The Frenchmon is egg omelette, frog and water.
The Spanish and Portuguese are olive oil, vinegar
and water.
The Dutchman is headache, sour-krout and water
The Down casters all pork and beans and cider.
The Greenlander is whale bubber seal fat and water.
The drunkard is mostly whisky and water.
All the charming sisterhood-especially the young
portion-are sugar and water.
And, lastly, the whole of fopdom is nothing but soft
sawder, milk and water.
So you see, my living sponges that however much
your component parts may vary the water-pure water
is thar and always prevails. Newborn babes however,
don't become aqueous until they have been long enough
in the world to absorb some of its moisture and that
the why their earliest infant squalls unac
companied by tears. Very old people also become very
dry nuts for the - Death to crack
My friends, believe in baptism-baptism by both
immersion and sprinkling. A good allover wash car
ries off equal amount of discomfort dirt and sin. 1t
is religious duty to look after the welfare of the body
to keep it we'll saturated and thereby make it COM
Portable residence for the amphbious soul. A vast
amount of water is daily evaporatng from your persha
BILE bodies and if you don't that they have fresh and
frequent supplies to keep up the proportion three to
one) you will repent in dirt and ashes before the dry
season is o, ye Of little hydrostatic faith how
often must you be reminded that for the salvation of
your corporeal systems, great deal more water
quired than hog and hominy.
Water, my brethren has its antipathies 1t dsdains
to associate with oil yet when they meet no fuss is
raised, but cold and solemn silence is maintained But
water and fire are sworn enemies When they clash
together, what terrific struggle ensues! Sometimes
fire gains the mastery, and then water has to mizze
evaporate-and leave not even mist behind. Then
again water comes off triumphant-and where is the
fire? Emphaticaly "extinguished" But | tell you,
my friends, what | am ready to do. am willing to
stake years salary against wind-broken mule that,
let the fire companies of San Francisco proceed to Tophct
with their machines, and that fire which has been burn
ing from the beginning of eternity would be got under
in amazing short space OF time. Let pray that
they may go there, sooner or later And then let
sing peans in praise of water
Water brethren sprinkling from the fountain, is the
emblem of Purity; when it comes in the form of rain,
it is embematical of Justice; and when descending
dew it is the pretest picture of Gentleness to be found
in the gilt-edged volume of Nature. But general
cleanser there is nothing equal to it in the world The
man who takes bath every day, and imbibes abun-
dance of pure water, must be both physically and
ally ceansed in spite of himself don't see how it is
possible for him to remain long either fousknned foul
mOuthed or fOulhearted. The world once became so
foul as to offend the nostrls of Heaven and nothing
but cold bath saved it from mortal gangrene l
sometimes think that another universal ablution
will be necessary to its final salvation God speed the
water companies!
Speaking of the great Freshet my friends, reminds
that that the first rain that fell upon the earth
1t must have been so for if it had ever raned before
rainbow would have been at time other
The philosophy of the thing this that when the earth
was made it contained all the water in self-the heav
ems were as dry as bakers oven Well, of course
evaporation naturally took place but it required
hundreds of years, by this slow process to fill the cees
tial ocean to overfowing Now, something happened
to give way during the filling up of the cloud
above and consequently, when it did rain, it
down kerS,ca and nightly astonishing to everybody
who happened to be little too late for the Ark-now
mind, l tell you
But let us stop phlosophizing, and think upon our
latter ends that when the final caa sis takes place
and threcquarters of mortal bodies shall have evap
GRATED to heavens, may hope that the immortal spirit
has kept it company. So mote it be!
Our COTToN CRop-Cotton is the most important
natural product in the world having bearing
ufacturing operations and the magnitude and influence
of an American cotton crop commands the attention OF
all civilized nations deficient abundant crop
ing rise fall in its price, and affects the interests of
millions of capitalists and arzans in every quarter of
the globe. To cotton fields they look with anxious
attention, upon their prosperity they dependent
for business and the of subsistence. From ta
BILE just prepared with great at the office OF the
Shipping and Commercial List this city, learn that
our total cotton crop for the year ending last month
(August amounts to 3,247 900 bales increase
that of the previous year by than 100000 bales
but it does not come up to the crop OF 1856 During
the past year prices have been very u:uating owing
to financial difficulties and the endorsements of man
uacurers but the wheels of manufacturing industry
are moving rapidv again. and yerv GOOD business IS