The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1858-01-16

Spicy COrrespOndence..-A Troe WIFE.
We are assured by friend who is per-
fectly cognzant of what he states, t,lat the
following pquant correspondence is genu-
inc. A gentleman, whose business calls him
good deal from home, is accustomed to
give the custody OF his correspondence to
his wife, an intelligent lady. who, ia obedi-
ence to his instructions, opens sll letters
hat come in her husbands absence; an
swers such Of them as she can, like CONT
dental clerk, and forwards the rest TO her
liege lord, at such places as he may have
designated at his departure. During O re
cent absence OF her husband the lady re-
ceived a letter, Of which the following
| (omitting names, dates, and places Is a true
copy:
"My Dear Sir-I saw fine picture of
you yesterday, and fell in love with it, as
did with the original in W last winter,
when saw you more than an hour, though
| suppose you did not see me anon. so ma
ny. l fear you will think me forward in
thus addressing you; but trust you are IS
noble and unsuspecting as you are handsome
and brilliant. Perhaps you would like 10
know something about me-your ardent ad-
mirer! WE'LL | am not very good at de-
scription, but will say am not married.
(though you are, | am told) Ny frienls
tell me have not a pretty face, but only
good figure. am rather petite, have black
eyes, black hair, and q dark complexion
that is, am What is called brunette am
stopping for few weeks with my brother
in-law and sister in this town, and dearly
wish you would meet me there before | re.
turn TO W. At any rate DO not fail to
write me at least few words to tell mo
whether ] shall ever you again, and know
you more intimately.
Forgive my boldness and believe me
Your friend,
To this letter the wife, who, by the by,
had not the least knowledge Of ,he person
to whom she was writing, made the follow
ing bitter reply:
Mademoisel,e-You letter Of the
inst, addressed to Mr.. -, was duly re-
celyed. Mr.. -, who is my husband.
directed me, when he left home some days
ago, TO open all his letters, and to answer
any of them that conveniently could. As
you seem to be rather impertinent will
answer your letter myself do OF thinl,
your description Of yourself will please NJ.
-. happen to know that he dislikes
black eyes and hates brunettes most deci.
dediy. 1t is quite true (as you seem to sup
pose) that he judges Of women as he does Of
horses; but do not think your inventory
of your points is complete enough to be
your height, weight, wind, and speed, and
here the word is illegible.] Taking your
charms at your own estmat., ! doubt whe-
.her they will prove sufficiently attractive to
lraw him so far as B, merely for the
Of comparing them with the
schedule. You say you trust my husband
S " unsuspecting." l think that is his ma
ure, but yet he is used to drawing infer
,nces which are sometimes as unkind as
suspicious. You say that you are unmarri-
ID. My advice to you is that you marry
omebody as soon as possible In most
ases would not recommend haste; but in
ours, am convinced there is truth in tho
roverb which speaks of the danger of de-
ay. Should you be so fortunate as to geta
husband, (Which may God mercifully
rantD my opinion is YOU willconsider anv
roman who should write him such letter
s this Of yours, impertinent, and, perhaps,
nmodest.
l will deliver your note to Mr..
'hen he returns, and also copy of my re-
ly, which am sure be will approve.
| am, with much respect, as you permit,
Mrs. -"