Bedford inquirer. [volume] (Bedford, Pa.) 1857-1884, 1858-02-12
ALPHABETICAL PROGRESSION,


While engaged in the tobacco and cigar bus
iness, used to have for customer ia cheap
cigars, ole of those knowing fellows whose
knowlsdge serves better TO bore his victims than
advance science. You could not make him be-
lieve that-oh, no. Tell him there were no re-
gala cigars that cost forty dollars per thousaLd!
II nilght do 10 stuff down the throat of one of
thcm that knew no better; be was none ef them.
And Sc 1t was with everything; he always knew
best. 1t always appeared to be bis delight TO
draw ne INTO some controversy, no matter what
the subject was, in order 10 hear himself draw
forth. tried every way could think of to
circunyent him, and at length did succeed iu
laying him out as fat as a founder
1t was Saturdad afternoon, he came in, made
his purchase. and seated himself, to deal out
his usual portion; but was awake for him
Captain" +" said |, 81 have made up my mind
to go to California, and if you wish to 60 into
speculation, now is your time"
''As how,' said he.
"Nhy, you zee these fifteen boxes of cigars,
well, there are two hundred and fifty in each
box, and l Will let you have the whole fifteen
at low rate, providing you take them ALL"
Very WE'LL" said my friend, s'letus bear the
conditions"
"fou give me one cent for tie first box, two
cents for the secoud, four cents for the third,
and 50 OF, doubling on every box"
'Done," said he, .sfetch on your cigars
Suppose you think have not1nouey enough
'Not at all, 50 let u>prooeea, Here is your
first box
de drew FROM his pocket leatharn parse,
and out OF it handful Of coin.
"And here is your ceot," said he, depositing
a green disoolored copper GU the counter.
''Here is your second hox.'
''Here is your TWO cents
Every well, here Is your third box
''Aud here is your four ceuts,' said he
ctuckling.
'sHere is your fourth box"
Exactly. And here is your eight cents ha.
IA! ha. old fellow 60 on.
"ileFe is your fifth box, said handing
down another
Sand here is your sixteen cents"
'sHere is your sixth box
"And-ha! ha. ha! here is your thirty tive
Here is Your seventh box"
''And here-ha. ha! tie joke is getting too
rich-here is your sixty four cents and half your
cigars are gone
"Here is your eight box, sgid assuming d
cold indifference that perfectly surprised the
And here is your dollar aud tseniy-oight
cents"
"Here is your ninth box
"Here is your-let me see-ha! Two dollars
and 6fty-six cents"
"Here is your tenth box.
Ee drew bis wallet tnoughtfuly aud on the
slate made small calculation.
"And here is your i've dollars and twelve
cents"
"Here is your eleventh box
'Anl here is your-twico fise is ten, twice
twelve twenty four-ten dollars and twenty
four cents"
At this stage Of the game be had got quite
docile, aud continued
"Here is your twelfth box; hand over twenty
aolars and forty eight eents.''
Here the globules Of perspiration, large ss
marrow-fat peas, stood out in bold relief on bis
face, but at length he doled out the sum.
'Hete is your thirteenth box; pile out forty
dollars aud niHety-six oents''
''If / DO, shall, bpt will metz With
that be left, and have never been able TO get
uear him since.