The prairie news. [volume] (Okolona, Miss.) 1851-1875, 1858-09-16
A SHORT PATENT SERMON.
BY DOW, JR,

BY DOW, JR,
At the request Of brother s. N. Kerr
phunix Rancho, near Bangor) | will
medde with the following
"whar de hen scratch, dar she spec to find dc bng"
Nh Hearers II am informed that a
dark complexion preacher, in Columbus,
Ohio, once took the above for his text,
and proved from it that olr First Parents
fell out of an apple-tree into mud-hole'
which caused their frst-born to be as
black as your hat. am afraid that my
colored colaborer has made much more
out Of it than cam for, turn 1t over, set
it upon end, lay it down and sprawl it
open-after all, this old rooster don't find
great deal to pick at.
In tile first place, my brethren, / will
PROFOUND pious conundrum Why are
men like watches Because we must
look inside of them for their good quail
ties, and Judge of them by their works
Wei, my brethren, the work OF men
and women in general consists, for the
most part, in scratching, and the pros
pect Of bug is the incentive. You may
notice, brethren, that whenever hen
makes scratch, she always gives pick;
but whether she gets bug at every
dip, is very uncertain. imagine not.--
Nevertheless, where the hen scratches
there she erpects to find a bug.
Expecting is one thing, you know, my
| friends, and finding another. You may
turn over many stone in this precarlons
world, and find no bug, after all, Phre-
nologically speaking, the human head is
one vast bump of expectation, and moth
ing else.
There are various kinds of bugs, breth-
ren, in the buggy sphere. There are big
bugs, little bugs, tumble-bugs, straddle-
bugs, humbugs and bug-bears. But You
needn't scratch about much to find any
of these; for they are everywhere thick
er than shippers in a seven year Old
cheese.
To find the bug you 50 earnestly de-
sire, requires diligent scratching and il
by so doing you don't happen to catch it,
YOU can comfort yourself with the refiec,
ton that you put in the licks for 1t, and
it ought to have been yours. II young
man takes girl about to see the shows,
feeds her with tit-bits, and buys her pret-
ty caicoes, his title to kiss is clear and
indisputable--for where the hen scratch
es, there she expects to find a bug
The bug that you are all after, my
brethren, is the gold-bug; !; but alack-a-
day, how many of you scratch in vain /;
| yet it is found in manure heaps as well
as in auriferous places. The farmer turns
it up with his plow, and the gardener
with his spade and yet thousands keep
scratching here and there without finding
'ary bug. -,
A few years ago, hundreds of you iell
to scratching at Kern river, expecting to
find mighty big bug. Well, you scratch
ed, and scratched, and scratched; and
what did YOU turn up at last "a mon
strous humbug Got frightened and
scrabbled for home, q vast sight more
1 buggy than you went-for "where the
/ hen scratches, there she expects to ind a
bug"
/ And now you all want to go to the
| Frazer river country; but there are 50
many different ways to get there, you are
in a quandary which to choose. 1t Is
/ like getting to Heaven. The Catholic
insists upon going straight through Pur-
gatory--the Baptists 90 roundabout
/ way, but keep where there is plenty OF
water, as they belong to the class known
as amphibQ-the Presbyteflans think
/ their road the safest, although rather hot
i the Universalists declare theirs to be
the most pleasant--while the Methodlsts
shout " Halleluyah,' and scare up rab,
| bits, as they journey upon the good old
/ Jordan route. But when you are once
there, Cat the diggings, | mean, for a am
not sure that you will ever reach the oth-
or place, one stands just as good a chance
as another-and don't know but a little
better. You all have about an equal
amount of hope. If not pluck, and each
/ will probably pitch ia and dig with all
4 the energy of a terrier at gopher,
hole-for nswhere the hen scratches
I there she expects to find a bug.
4 Let me make another application o
!. text, my brethren. Beware of an oily
tongued, sycophantic friend who is eve
ready to do you small favor-who pro
4 fesses Willingness to serve YOU st al