Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-10-07
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JOE BOWERS WEDDING.

JOE BOWERS WEDDING,
In the county Of -, away up in the
mountains, boatst one of the best judges in
California. On the bench he is firm, deci-
ded, and prompt, not caring the snap of the
finger for either the applause of friends, or
the mutterings of enemies. lis, perhaps,
the most devoted man to law in all creation,
and has his head so full Of what he terms
"judicial talk" that he not unfrequently
finds himself making learned charges and
passing sentence outside Of the court room.
On a recent occasion the Judge was call
ed on to exercise the "power and authority in
him vested" ip the case of young couple,
who desired their hearts united in the holy
band of wedlock. Of course he consented
to perform the pleasing duty, and on the ap-
pointed evening was promptly on hand at
the house at which the affair was to come
off. The room was crowded by the beauty
and fashion of the town, and none looked
more digui6ed or happy than the judge
himself, who was dressed within an inch of
his life.
1t is customary on occasions of the kind
referred to, for the good folks of the noun
tain towns to pass round the wine quite free.
ly, and to their everlasting credit we will add
they consider it no harm for one to manifest
his interest in the joyous event by getting
'lively." The judge is an ardent admirer of
the fair sex, having in the course of his life
led the third one to the altar. To use his
own language, he isa "great believer in we'd
dings," and that he should become little
mellow amid the glorious scene of the even
ing, was not to be WONDERED at by those who
knew him Immediately. He had the weak
ness of some good judges. He would take his
"tod."
The wine had passed round and round and
round. The music had ceased The time
for making Joseph Bowers and Nancy Har-
kens one, had arrived. Every heart throb.
bed with the most delightful emotions. The
young gentlemen desired to know how "Joe"
would stand it, and the young ladies were
most anxious to see how " Nance" would
suffer the anxious shock. Others, again,
who had closely observed the turn Of affairs
during the evening, fixed their attention up
on the judge to see how he would come out
of the scrape.
At length the trying moment was announ-
ced, the judge arose very cautiously from the
chair, which he had occupied in one corner
of the room, and casting his eye over the
company, he singled out the Sheriff Of the
county who was present as an invited guest.
The judge had imbibed just enough to make
him forget the nature of his business. He
was. full of his judicial talk he required no.
thing but the presence of the sheriff to start
him. Looking sternly at the officer he shout
ed:
"Mr. Sheriff, open the court, and call or.
der !"
A general twitter followed this command,
in the midst of which the sheriff took the
"court" gently by the arm, and led him to
his seat in the corner, at the same time
informing the august parsonage of the mis-
take.
Everything now bid fair for pleasant and
sudden termination of the affair, until ano.
ther annoyance, which was nothing less than
the absence of the bridegroom, was observed
1t turned out that he had just stepped across
the street to join his friends in parting
drink, but before his return, some cold
blooded wag had whispered into the ear Of
our old fogy the cause of" delay in the pro-
ceedings." Instantly the chair in the cor
ner moved, and in that direction all eyes
were fixed.
"Mr. Sheriff." slowly drawled the judge,
"bring Joe into the court on supenar'-
the judge had his own way of pronouncing
the word-then addressing the bride who
stood in the foreground, and hung her head
in deep confusion, he added: dispose you're
the plaintiff. Well, don't take on. limo
cence and virtue will be protected by this
here court"
This was the saddest blunder of ALL The
Judge was again made to see his mistake, and
would have been considerably set back, had it
not been for corrective in the shape of "for-
ty drops of the critter," which he instantly
applied.
In few moments all was ready in right
down earnest The bridegroom had arrived,
full of joy. The company pressed forward.
The excitement was intense. He evidently
felt every inch Judge.
"J.J.o-e- B-B-B.o-owers," commenced the
man of law, in that distressing style of speech
with which he was invariably troubled when
under the influence of liquor; J-J-oe BIB.