Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1858-06-25
Ho" TON CORwIN RID HIS SISTER
OF AN OBNOXIOUS LOVER.
ny A WESTERN MAI


Every ono has heard of the eloouan. No.
thetic and humorous stump orator II OH fd. fd.
was pronouncedsby Mr.. Clay Ia most CONNIE.
tent authority to be the finest stump sneaker
nc had over heard; and in this opinion most
nearthy coincide, after having heard CLAW.
Nriticnden, Jones of Tennessee, Polk, Benia-
lnI1, Soule, Randall, Hunt Tom Marshall
others "''' VI
Ncil, this great orator carried his love of fun
into every department of life. In the priv,to
circle, where lie knew every person, and where
ne unbosoIred himself fully, he was the most
Iellshttui and genial conversationalist I ever
hStened to- L do not know that he now. ne age
ana lnhrmlty arc Creeping on him. indulge
this proclivity to humor 80 much as be used 10
10. but some twenty years ago he use 4 to tell,
WIN great guSto, the following story
In carly hfe-sO early that L cannot re-
member the remoyal-my father pulled up
STAKES, ard carrying with him the household
goods, went from Bourbon county, Kentucky,
where was born, TO Ohio Notwithstanding a
rough and-tumble struggle with the world. he
bad hard time to get on, owing to a numer-
Gus and rapidly increasing family. Well, fam
NY matters had not much improved when |
had roacLed my thirteenth or fourteenth year.
At this time there lived in the neichbor-
hood young man by the name of Pickering
lie bad inherited a weli-stccked farm, Was
good locking, and made stron; profession of
religion. The latter qualification caused him
to lind peculiar favor in the eyes of my father,
who always was blinded by professions of extra
p;ety.
This fellow had a strong hankerine after
one OF my sisters, who was a very pretty girl
L" her ne was peculiarly distastcful Skc
seemed always excessively annoyed at his pres-
ence; let he was ever at her side. She dared
not dismiss him entirely, for fear of the pater-
nal anger Things went on in this way for n
year or two, and as 1 partook largely Of NV
SISTERS hatred to him, 1 resolved II get rid OF
MN I'D some way east about for a. plan for
some time, but nothing occurred Which aave mo
the slightest hope OF being successful
:" Al last, returning homo late one summer
night from mill, L found the family at their
nightly devOtiOns. Passing by the windows of
the room In which they were assembled saw
that Pickering was there, ard pretty soon
discovered that be Was nodding, and finally his
head dropped Now was my opportunity
stole silly into the hall. and reaching the hall
door, which was slightly ajar, and close by
which Pickering was, 'On bended knee I
reached in and, quickly pulling his chair from
under him, he rolled heavily, as n sound sleep
er would, upon the floor. Ihe noise alarmed
all The old gentleman stopped in the midst
of his almost interminable prayer, and saw the
position of Pickering. All the family laughed
outright; even my mother smiled.
PICKERING endeavOred to pick himself up
rapidly as possible, but he had touched the old
man upon bis tenderest point. Itwas evident.
from his rubbing his eyes, that he had slept
under the old gentleman's ministra,ivns and
had not my father reputation far and wide
Tor the feTvency and strength of his ministra-
tlons, and was not Pickering his protesting
brother 1t was too much. Slowly, yet mos
dignifedly, did the old man approach him.
kegone, hypocrite,' he cried, in thunder tones
Never enter my house again
Pickering was thunderstruck. He felt that
ne could make no apology which would not add
to the insult. He had no suspicion of the ex-
terror force which had aided him in his fall
lie at once found his hat, took up his line of
march, and, completely crestfallen, passed by
me as stood grinning in the shadow of the
porch.
At a suitable time l entered, got my supper,
was told by brother, in hurried whispers. what
had happened, and then | stole of to bed. af
fectlDg ignorance and laughing most heartily,
IA enscOnced myself in the sheets, at the com
plete success Of my plan.
Next day cautiously impaired my secret
10 my interested sister. She was in her own
room at the time, and she threw herself upon
the bed and rolled in agonies and commissions
oi laughter. She had been mancipatcd fo--
ever from the attentions Of an obnoxious lover
Inc old gentleman did not hear the real state
Ot the facts for full twenty years afterwards;
cut when be did he laughed heartily