davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
9masing 8taaipg,
DOESTICKS BEAT.


The Saturday Evening Gazette hasa New
York correspondent who beats Doesticks IN
humor and the knack in playing upon words.
The followingi is an extract from his last let
ter:
It is a free institution-flled with dead
heads, Professor wished to feel of my head.
Told me to uncover. Told him to feel of it
with my hat on. The hat was felt.
then took it off. He examined my wig.
Said he knew there was something in my
heaa-it was full of life. He dwell a long
time on a bump caused by the sidewalk fall.
ing against it while I was taking, my room.
mate home from a primary election. Groom
mate was very drunk on that occasion, he
thought he was taking me home.)
had an awful headache next morning.
I felt dragged out. Professor said large
bumps denoted great acquisitiveness ; said I
had a searching mind. Told me to search
if I had a quarter in my pocket-called that
experimental phreuology.'
Professor, after I had mentionedmy name,
C0uuuc6eu me ArOuuu LILO muSeum ono"So
e-alt the heads, Some were plaster casts !;
said they cast lots. Told him I was opposed
to gambIing-hs looked bewildered.
Showed me the skull of Mulligan. Multi
gan was an acrobat-made his last appear
ance on q tightrope at the city prison, for
the benefit of the public-broke his neck in
the performance.
Next showed me skulls Of men killed in
wars. Professor observed a curious fact,
that those slain in, battle were generally aged
having bald heads. In the next row was
the skull of a boatman it was not for sale ;
it looked ordinary-poor fellow, b e.hadru
his race. r. .
Wesnext paid urattention to the females.
They were seemingly old maids-being laid
on the shelf-in tiers. I couldn't tell them
from the heads of the males. Professor said
they had q little more jaw. He didn't speak
o their signs.
ASH was about departing, I noticed a Gu
rious shaped skull. I took it up, exclaiming:
aHow wonderful and fearful we are
madew
sPut that down, said the Professor, 'it
belongs to me.
It was marked tbaboonp =
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
GBeYorkbill&G enquirer
ISSUED EVERY THURSDAY MORNING,
Two Dollars per year, in Advance

nGa. To CLUBS OF TEN, the paper will be furn-
ished, one year, for Fifteen Dollars-invariably
in advance. An subscriptions not specially limited
at the time of subscribing will be considered as
made for an indefinite period, and will be %continp-
ed until all arrearages are paid, or at the option OF
the Proprietors. Subscriptions from other States
must INVARIABLY be accompanied with the cash or
the. name of some responsible person known to us.
pR- ADVERTISEMENT will be inserted at One
Dollar per square for the first, and Thirty-seYen-
and-a-half Cents for each subsequent insertion
n square to consist of twelve lines, BREWER, or less.
Business Cards, of half-square or less, will be in
serted at SIS, per year. For advertising Estrays
Tolled, So; Citations, So; Notices of Application
to the Legislature, S.; to be paid by the persons
handing in the advertisements. Monthly or Quar-
terly. advertisements will be charged One Dollar
per square, for each insertion. Contracts by the
year will be taken on liberal terms-the contracts
however, must in all casesbe confined to the i'm
mediate business of the firm or individual con-
tracing. AL advertisements not having the num-
Der Of insertions marked on the margin, will be
continued until forbid and charged accordingly.
Obituary Notices exceeding one square in length,
will be charged for the overplus, at regular rates.
Tributes of Respect rated as advertisements.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

~Two Irishmen, on landing in this
country, and sitting down to their first din.
ner, found on the table a dish of prepared
mustard, which neither Of them had ever
happened to meet before. One of them took
a spoonful at a venture, which quickly
brought a deluge of tears to his eyes.
"Wha are you crying about ?" asked his
his companion.
81 was crying at the recollection of my
poor father, who was hung about 20 years
ago."
The dinner proceeded, and soon the other
made a dip into the: mustard with q similar
effect.
what are you crying about?" was the
grave inquiry Of his comrade.
81 am crying because you were not hung
when your father was"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

ANEcDoTE OF HENRY CLAY.-The great
statesman and orator was travelling some
where "out West" and put up for the night
at a country tavern. Mine host, in looking
over the register, discovered the name of
Henry Clay. There was one "Clay." Could
it be possible that he had this distinguished
mar under his roof? He was a%stounded, de-.
lighted. Next morning, as soon as the great
man appeared, the admirable Boniface bus
tied forward and made his rude bow.
"Mr. Clay, I believe, sir % said he.
"That is nv name," said the gentleman,
in his afable tone.
Mr.. Clay, the Congressman
"Yes, sir"
dwell, sir, I've heard of you, and !
thought I'd just ask fyou wouldn't give me
and my old woman a little speech before you
go2"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
o ore, yours respectfully,
GEORGE W. HIGGINBOTHAM,
SARAH A. HIGGINBOTHAM.
HOWARD ASSOCIATION.
PHILADELPHIA.
A Benevolent Institution established by special En-
document for the Reliefofthe Sick and Dis
tessed, afflicted NTH NiruAnt

A Benevolent Institution established by special En-
document for the Rsliefofths Sick and Dis
tressed, afflicted NTH ViruAnt
and Epidemic Diseases.
TNHE HOWARD ASSOCIATION, in view of the
i. awful destruction Of human life, caused by
Sexual disease, and the receptions p~raoticed upon
the unfortuate victims of such diseases by Quacks,
several years ago directed their Consulting Sur
peon, as q CHARITABLE ACT worthy Of their
name, to open q Dispensary for the treatment of
this class Of disease, in all their forms, and to
give MEDICAL ADVICE GRATIS to oil who apply
BY letter, with q description Of their, condition,
(age, occupation, habits of life, So. and in cases
Of extreme poverty, to FURNISH MEDICINES
FREE OF CHARGE. It is needless to add that
the Association commands the highest Medical
skill of the age, and will furnish the most modern
treatment.
The Directors of the Association, in their Annu-
al Report upon the treatment of Sexual Diseases,
for the year ending January LIST, 1858, express the
highest satisfaction with the success which has
attended the labors Of the Consulting surgeonin
the cure of Spermstorrhna, Seminal Weakness,
Impotence, Gonorrho, elect, Syphilis, the vice Of
Onanism or Self.abuye, &c., and order q continu-
ance of the same plan for the ensuing year.
The Directors, on a review Of the past, feel as
surred that their labors in this sphere of benevo-
lent effort have been of great benefit to the aflict-
ed, especially to the young, and they;haye resolv-
ed to devote themselves, with. renewed zeal, to
this very important and much despisedcause.
Al admirable Report on Spermatorrhea, or
Seminal Weakness, the vice of Onanism, Mustur-
baton, or Self.abust, and other diseases. Of the
sexual organs, by the Consulting Surgeon, will be
sent by mail lin a sealed enyelope) FREE OF
CABRGE, on receipt Of TWO STAMPS for post
age. Other Reports and Tracts on the nature
and treatment. Of sexual diseases, diet, &c., ore
constantly being published for gratuitous distribu.
ton, and will be sent to the afflicted. Some of
the new remedies and methods Of treatment dis
covered during the last year., are Of great value.
Address, for Report or treatment, DR.. GEORGE
R. CALHOUN, Consulting Surgeon, Howard As
ISOLATION, No. 2 South Ninth Street, Philadelphia,
Pa. By order Of the Directors.
EZRA D. HEARTWELL, President.
GEORGE FAIRCHILD, Secretary.
June 20 20 ly
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
IL JAMES NJ. EDNEY,| 80
MERCHANT,

ID UYS and forwards every kind Of merchandise
I'D for 81 per cent. Commission. Refers to Cows.
Swain and Morehead, N. W. Woodfn, J. W. o.
borne, G. P. Mendenhall, A. NJ. German, Esqrs.
and Rev. c.. F. Deems, Hon. W. A. Graham, and
others. Dealer in Pianos, Melodeons, Organs,
Harps, Guitars, Music, Sewing Machines, Iron
Safes, Pumps, Garden Engines, SC. A printed
list of the different makers, kinds and prices sent
free. Publisher. of an elegant Autograph of
'"Lickory Nut Fals,"N. C. (S1j and the "Cher-
okee Physician: or, Indian Guide to
Health" This invaluable family adviser should
be in every house. 1t treats of all diseases, has
a copious glossary, and prescribes the remedies
from natures bounteous stores, for all our infirm-
tiles and misfortunes. 1t is printed on fine white
paper, handsomely bound, fourth edition, 300 pa
ges, and is mailed free for one dollar. New Rose
wood pionos S15O.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

BARBERoUs.-Two BARRIERS in Newark,
Nj, commenced operations with two combs,
a razor, n bar of soap and a wash.basin,
about a month ago, but were making money
so fast, that the Junior partner retired from
the service, spent the proceeds, and run the
concern in debt. The senior thought this
was going a little too far, and called on the
other to "come to time" and help to settle
the liabilities, which amounted to 81 S4.-
But he lodged, and retired on his dignity
The following notice was subsequently stuck
up by.a piece Of soap on a telegraph pole
near Market street depot:
Notes.-The dissolution OBJ co-parships
heretofore resisting twixt me and Nose
Jones, in the barber perfession, am hereto
fore resolved. Pusuns what ose must pay
the inscriber. Dem what the furm ose must
call on Jones, as de furm is now insolvent'
L1GEU JOHNSTON.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

IRISH ARITHMETIC.-An Irish counsel.
lor having lost a cause which had been tried
before three judges, one of whom was esteem
ed an able lawyer, the other two very poor
ones, a brother counsel was merry on the oc.
%casion.
why" says he, "who the devil could
help it, when there are an hundred judges
on the benchT
can hundred" says the other, "there
we're but three"
"By St. Patrick" replied he, "there was
a figure of one and two ~cyphers."
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
LAW BLANKS!

WE have on hand, and are prepared to supply
w at short notice, ct the ENQUIRER Office,
oil kinds of LAWYERS BLANKS in general de-
mand, printed on good paper and neatly pressed.
We offer them at 10 cents % quire. Single half
Quire so cents. As we have incurred considers
bic outlay to enable US to furnish q good article,
we will sell for CASH and CASH ONLY.
Our present stock consists of the following va
~rieties, viz: Sum Pro; III. Fa.; Fl. R. on Sum.
Pro-; Copy Writ in Case; Copy Writ in Debt; De-
e~laration on Account; Declaration on Promisory
Note; Declaration on Bond or Sealed Notej Sud.
pena Rris; Subpoena Tickets, &c.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

M A negro in Louisville broke open a
box belonging to acomrade, containing three
silver dollars, and stole one of the pieces,
Having been arraigned for theft, the usual
plea of insanity was urged, the counsel de,
claring that no sane man would take one and
leave two dollars behind. Whereupon the
Cu@eo who was robbed, exclaimed with great
emphasis: ~
"Massa, I tell you dat nigga amt crazy
he broke my box open and took de dollar
out. Now, if he'd broke de box open and
put de dollar in, den I say he's crazy"
His argument was conclusive, and the
thief was sent up.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

AN UNREASONABLE PRoPosAL.-An Irish
servant, who was in the employment of an
English gentleman residing Ireland, was
on one occasion, about going to a fair, held
annually at a n~eighboriug village, when his
master endeavored to dissuade him from 60
ing. sYou always" said he, 'come home
with broken head; now stay at home, Darby,
and I'll give you five shillings.' Pm for
ever and all obliged to yourhonor,' said OAR
by; sbut does it stand to %raiSon,' added he,
Furnishing his shillilah over his head, does
it stand to raison that I'd take FIVE shilling
for the crate big batting I'm to get to day /?
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

ONE OF THE JUsTIoEs.-There lives, not
a thousand miles from this place, a certain
Justice of the Peace, who a short time since
had a gentleman arraigned before him on a
charge of ~swiudling. The following is the
substance of the trial:
Justice of the Peace.-Prisoner, you are
brought before me accused of an accusation
to commit a swindle, and it now involves
upon you to prove yourself guilty or not gull
ty to the satisfaction Of this honorable court.
What say you?
Prisoner.-Not guilty.
Justice Looking indignant and surpri-
.sed-The hi you say! Why I am now
writing out a permittimus to send you to jail:
The prisoner arose to object to such assm'
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

LOGIC" J. say boy, whose horse is that
you are riding?"
"Why, its daddy's."
"Well who is your daddy"
"Why, don't you know? He is uncle Pc
ter Jones'"
$50 you are the son Of your uncle-how
do you make that outT"
"Well, I don't know exactly how it is,
but you see, daddy got to be a widower, and
married mothers sister, who is Aunt Sally,
so he is my uncle now"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

BOLD FIGURES A LA SPURaEoN.-The
Rev. Sam. Clawson, q Virginian minister,
gives expression to this bit:
"Thank God, the day is not far distant
when you shall be chained down to helps
brazen floor and the Devil with his three
pronged harpoon will pierce your reeking
heart, and pile red hot cinders of black
damnation upon you as high as the pyramids
of Egypt, and fry out The pride Jyow fat
to grease the gudgeons ofheU."
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

YORK DISTRICT. - ,
Eldred D. Williamson ps. s. W. Ruddock.-A6ae1.
ment.
W. B. Withers, Us. same.-Ataehment.
WHEREAS the Plaintiffs did, on the Goth day
w Of November 1857, file their declarations a.
gainst the defendant in the shove stated cases,
who, as 1t Is said, is absent from and without the
limits Of this State, and has neither wife nor at
torney within the same upon whom o copy Of the
same declaration might be served. It Is, there
fore Ordered, that the said defendant do appear
and pleadto the said declarations, on or before the
18th day of January, which will be in the year Of
our Lordsone thousand eight hundred and fifty:
nine, otherwise final and absolute Judgment viii
then be given and awarded against him.
JOHN G. ENL0E, o. &C pIs.
Jan27 1yq
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
From the Southern Planter.
RAISING HOGS.

Mr.. Editorials I have nothing to do
and so much time to spare, 1 thought l
would drop you a hint about hogs. The
raising of pork is no small item to every
good farmer. In the South, without a plenty
of this important article, no good master
can feel contented and since my return
from the South and West, where I heard 80
much talk about the supply from the West
being cut off by that dreadful scourge known
as the hog cholera, I feel it a duty to my
brother farmers to give them my experience
in raising hogs for the last twelve years.
The first year that I set out on my VI
hook, I was we'll cared for by my father, who
gave me a plenty Of stock of all kinds to
commence with. I was, and always have
been partial to hog raising, so gave my hogs
all the care 1 could. I paid much attention
to the breed, and what few I raised I thought
of a superior kind, being a cross on the
Snapdragon, Berkshire and Irish Grazier.
"Well Mr.. Editor, with this fine breed of
hogs, Gas they have since proved to be,) 1
could scarcely raise pork enough for t. first
three years of my farming life. My hogs
would sicken and die, do what 1 would,
with some disease. On one occasion, while
examining my hogs in a pine field, I noticed
the best and latest of them were employed
in roofing up pine roots and eating them
greedily while those in lower plight cared
little or nothing for them, and contented
themselves with grass. I observed this sew
eral times, and cam to this conclusion /: that
it could not be for the sustenance that the
latest and best of my hogs were devouring
these roots SO greedily; if it was, why did not
the poor ones seem as anxious to get the
roots? And again, why was it that whenev-
er I lost a hog or shoat it was In fine condi-
ton?
1 am now fully satisfied that my conclu-
sion was correct, that it was not for the sus-
tenance that they eat the root, but that it is
a hog medicine, and they use it, and know it
by instinct as the dog resorts to grass for all
his ailments. Being satisfied for what pur.
pose the pine roots vas used by the hog, l
determined to try this remedy in a more
concentrated form, so I got the spirits Of tur-
pehtine, knowing that was a strong anthel-
mintic and diuretic, commenced giving my
hogs a common teaspoonful to every hog
that was weaned from the mother. They
soon gave strong indications of health ; and
to show on what my confidence is built, since
lS47, 1 have not lost a hog of any descrip.
ton, or kind, that 1 know Of, from disease
of any kind.
1t may be that the spirits Of turpentine
may relieve the hog cholera. 1t can be used
in a simple manner just take a quart OF
shell corn, or wheat, put it in a tub and mea-
sure a ~teaspoonful per head to all Of your
hogs. Be careful to mix the turpeutine we'll
in the vessel, and then scatter it over the
ground 80 that each ope gets his share.
w. L.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

mary proceeding, but the Justice informed
him that sssthar war no use of talkin," and if
he didn't sshet his mouth" ID if he
wouldn't fine him for contempting the hon
orable court. The permittimus was signed,
handed to an officer, and the prisoner jagged.
CofeeuiNe, (Miss.) MteKigencer.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
NV MANHOOD, AND IT'S PREM

" AZURE DECLINE.-Just Published, Gratis,
the Goth Thousand: A few words on the rational
treatment, without Medicine, of Spermatorrhea
or Local Weakness, Nocturnal Emissions, Genital
and Nervous Debility, Impotency, and Impedi-
ments to Marriage generally, by
B. DE LANEY, NJ. D.
The, important fact that the many alarming
complaints, originating in the imprudence and
solitude of youth, may be easily removed WITH
OUT MEDICINE, is in this small tract, clearly
demonstrated and the entirely new and highly
successful treatment, as adopted by the Author,
fully explained, by means of which every one is
enabled to cure HIMSELF perfectly and at the
least possible cost, thereby avoiding all the adver-
tised nOstrums Of the day.
Sent to any address, gratis and post free in o
sealed envelope, by RENTING (post paidl two
postage stamps to Or. B. DE LANEY,. SO East
31st street, New York City.
May6 IL II
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

not the work of the Lord, neither consider
the operation of Hishands.
Wo, to the crown of pride, to the drunk
ards of Ephraim, whose glorious beauty is a
fading flower, which are on the head Of the
fat valleys Of them that are overcome with
wine.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
Eorn

A Kentuckian at the battle Of N. Orleans,
who disdained the restraints of a soldiers
life, with his name on the muster roll, pre-.
ferred "going it %alone," fighting upon his
own hook. While the battle was raging
fercest, and the shot flying thick as hail,
carrying death wherever they fell, Kentuck
might have been seen stationed under a tall
maple, loading and firing his rifle, as perfect
ly unconcerpsd as though he was sspicking
deer" Every time he brought his rifle to
his. shoulder a red coat bit the dust. e0ld
Hickory" who, supposing he had become
separated from his company, rode up to him
to bring him behind the redoubts, as he was
in q position which exposed his person to
the fire of the enemy.
"Hallow! my man, what regiment do you
belong to-" said the General.
"Regiment I" answered Kentuck; "hold
on, yonder's another of 'em," and bringing
his shooting iron to his shoulder, he ran his
eye along the barrel-a fash followed, and
another Englishman came tumbling to the
ground. -.
"Whose company do you belong to-?
again inquired the General.
"Company the d." was the reply Of
Kentuck, as he busted himself re-loading;
"see that ar Teller with the gold fxins on his
coat and boss. Jist watch me perforate him."
The General gazed in the direction indi-
Gated by the rife, and observed a British
Colonel riding up and down the advancing
columns of the foe. Kentuck pulled the
trigger, and the gallant Colonel followed his
companions that Kentuck had laid low in
death that day.
aHurrah for Kentuck !" shouted the free
fighter, as his victim came topping from his
horse, then turning to the General he con.
tinued, "Pm fighting on my VI hook,
stranger" and leisurely proceeded to reload.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
M How much did you ask for then

pr How much did you ask for them
buttons ?" inquired an Irish customer.
uFifteen cents"
"Ill giveye thirty-seven."
81 didn't say ffty-I said fifteen" re.
piled the honest dealer.
"Bedad, and I'll give ye tin cints, thin,"
was the prompt reply.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

"naTPa, I know what a 6llibuster is.'-
"Well Jonny, what is q fllibuster" "It
is green clover" "Green what 2" "Green
clover, cause when uncle Jacks little flly
.foundered herself, he said, a little more of the
green clover would a busted her; and eff it
had, wouldn't it a been a ~fllybuster." $50
to bed child 60 to bed"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

"a a person will do more good in one
month by correcting his " errors, than he
will do in a year by finding out the tailings
Of others. -
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

~ DOE. SOPONIFIER.-An article
y highly useful at this season, for making the
very best kind Of soap. One Dollars worth Of
this article will make fifty gallons Of most excel
lent washing 500 }. Warranted genuine. For
Salo by ALLISON u BRATTON.
Jan - 2 tt -
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
The State of. So. Carolina,
YORK DISTRICT.
]. M. Strong, In the Common Pleas.

; ps.
8. W. Ruddock. Attachment.
WHEREAs the plaintiff did on the 18th day
w of January, 1858, file his Declaration a.
gainst the defendant, who, las it is said is absent
from and without the limits Of this State, and has
neither wife nor attorney known within the same,
upon whom o copy Of the said declaration might
be served. It is therefore Ordered that the said
Defendant do appear and plead to the said Dec
~laration, on or before the 18th day of January,
which will be in the year Of our Lord one thous-
and eight hundred and ffty.nine, otherwise final
and absolute judgment will then be given and a.
warded against him.
JOHN G. ENLOE, @. c. O. pLs.
Jan 20 ly
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

T AMP, LINsEED s. TRAIN OIL.
IL Superior articles. For Sale by
ALLISON 4 BRATT0N.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10

REMARKs.-The above prescription is
very near the same as our proposed remedy
(tar) in a late number of the Farmer and
Plsnter!-ED.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1858-06-10
Pure SODA WATER,
AVID TITLES. MAGISTRATES

AND LEY, ES
IL Summons and Recognizances; Commissions
to Examine Witnesses, Co. sa., Ca. Sa. on Sum.
Pro-, Sub. ad Res, Writ in Attachment, &C., to.
pether with all kinds of Law Blanks in common
use. For sale at the ENQUIRER OFFICE, and will
be sent by mail to any address, postage prepaid,
at One Dollar per Quire. ="