The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1858-05-22
Who WAS FOOLED,

san Who WAS R0OLKDs
On the ;st of April q young Cincinnati
awyer was called upon BY . gentleman who
his advice in . very important case,
70 be cA1ledit. After some consultation the
gentleman took his departure, agreeing to
'eturn the next morning, and left the attor-
,ey y prepare papers and to mediate mp
on the pleasing prospect Of q new case in
court. Ii is needless to add that ut last
accounts the stranger had not returned, and
probably will not till next FOOLS day. The
young lawyer, however, nothing daunted by
ehis encouraging denouenent, hit upon an
expedient for turning the tables, which might
be- classed under the head of sharp practice.
1t was nothing less than sending his 'slittle
bill'' to tho practical joker, charging the
moderate sum Of $40, for professional adj
vice. He wants to be fooled again in the
same manner, every first of April.
FiDibssterins In = New Quarter.
A party of ss6llibusters" have recently
been paying a visit to the coast of Sumatra,
and to some Of the adjacent islands, fortify-
ing the villages, hosting the British flag,
and levyiug contributions on tbs natives
without stint or scruple. A Dutch wa
steamer being sent after them, on one occa-
siea the scamps took to their heels-but
there is reason to believe they are still
''bobbing around" General Walker then,
we thus see, has his copyists, away of in
Polynesia. The British Lion was a big
6llibuster before the American Eagle was
hatched, it is true, but the Eagle of late has
had such a monopoly Of that business, that
the world was beginning to think there was
no other partner in the frm-or rather, that
the older partner had grown honest. All q
mistake.
The California Overland Mail.
Tho Ell Paso overland mail route to CAL
% ~ifornia, to which the Post Master General,
with NO other substantial reason than his
sectional partially, gave that preference,
proves a failure. The contractors are at
Washington, seeking a change Of the route.
The idea of going to the extreme Southern
border of the country, with this important
line Of communication, when there is a mid
die route altogether more feasible and every
WAY more convenient, could not have been
seriously entertained by anybody outside Of
the clique of Southern monarchists. The
money used there will be thrown away.
1000
e. The Detroit Daily Advertiser says:
A we'll known gentleman of that city, who
has no insurmountable objection to the fas-
cinations of female society, entered the cars
at q station on the New York Central, with
friend, about midnight. The lights had
burned down, ana our hero deserving a lady
alone in a seat, slid quietly in beside her,
his friend taking the next in the rear. Grad
ually, as the night wore on, the gentleman
gently drew his companion toward him, I'M
til; unconsciously to her without doubt, she
reclined her head in quiet slumber upon his
shoulder, his arm resting protectingly upon
hers. The late dawning threw a gray, cold
CLEAN through the car window, which ena-
bled our hero to catch a glimpse of his new
acquaintance-she was eighty, if she was
. day, with nary tooth in her head. He
stole one glance ut his observing friend in
the rear, and made a break for the fire.
cwThe Bellefonte Democrat tells a good
story of Sam Pike, who had been down the
river this Spring, with a raft. Returning
home, he stopped at a tavern, where quite a
croud was discussing the Kansas question.
Sam had not slept the previous night, and
was about squaring himself out for a COM
Portable moose, when one of the loudest,
turning to him, said: "Here sits a Lecomp-
ton man, I'll bet the liquor for the ROOM"
"Done!!" says his opponent, who was anti
Lecompton. "Now, then, FRIEND" said No.
l, "In order to decide this bet, will you be
30 kind as to tell US whether you are a Le-
compton man?'' "What made you think
so?'5 said Sam, 'Because, sir, you look like
one: can always tell them by their looks"
replied No. l. Sam answered, "Do l? Well
gentlemen, I was on q raft from Snow Shoe
to Marietta; l have been drunk for tuo
reeks; but l had no idea hatI looked as
hard as that" The Lecomptouer paid the
liquor, and sloped.
f1y'Wilson and Phinney are the leading
members of the Washington bar. Sitting
opposite one another at dinner ~table-they
are always opposite in practice at the bar in
the court house, and agreed as to the bar in
the hotel-Wilson was describing the effects
of a speech he made a few nights before in
n great political meeting in the village where
Phinney resides.
"Indeed," said he, "Inever saw the people
80 filed with enthusiasm"
"Filled with what?:' cried Phinney.
"With enthusiasm" repeated Wilson.
ooh, all" said Phinney." l understand;
but | never heard it called by that name
before; We call it RUM"
degenerate Son.
Mr.. James B. Clay has written a letter to
the Boston Daily advertiser, denying that
his father was the author of the Missouri
Compromise. The Louisville Journal, after
showing that if not its author, Mr.. Clay was
the mainstay Of that measure, and always
looked upon it as the one act of his life in
which he felt most pride, says:
"Mr. Clay was the author of a great many
glorious things, and of only one that he had
reason to be ashamed of-and that one is
now in Congress-"
eT-Thc way that the Lecomptonits get up
apublic meeting, to testify their JOY at the
passage Of the Bright English swindle is
thus set forth by On exchange: ''They get
q couple Of salvage dogs and commence a
canine fight. Of course, all the "roughs"
gather to see the dog fight, and then some