Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1858-11-19
MY wIFE.s COUSIN.

my wife who resided in the city Of Phil.
adelphia. had not seen him for long
time. but having understood that he was
in pfhuent circumstances, l was but little
prepared for the condition in which |
found him. Through Information derived
from a PhAadelphia directory, | went TO
one Of those alleys with which that city
abOucds. and found his name on q sign
board, associated with that Of another
man, over a dark and dingy shop. The
sign purported that they were IOcksmiths
and beIl-hangers; also that locks were re.
paired and keys fitted. Without ceremo-
ny walked into the gloomy recess, where
th"re was a bIacksmith's forge. and where,
among several muscular looking men, up
to their armpits in work, was my my
-Wife's cousin lie received me most cor
daily, and for a moment internlitredr Il ling
a huge brass key an which he was en- gag
ed, and by the shake Of nv own dexter
by cue Of his broad brawny hands can
liken TO nothing nearer than the shock OF
young earthquake.
Take a seat. take a seat he observ>
ed. and just as soon as | finish this key
we'll make tracks for home
Of course replied that was in no hur
ry, aud at once became interested in the
facile manner in which he was metamor,
phosing a rough casting into n polished
key. AS sUon as it Was completed, he
washed the worst Of the dirt from his
hands hung up his work apron. and put
ting 90 hi coat and hat, remarked in
cheerful tone. come now. cousin Alcck.
let's go and see whether wife has got any
tea fJr u.s.
After we were on the street, our con-
vcrsauiOn iNseusibly ran on business. and
l took occasion to say to him that | had
been Of the opinion that he had retired
tLom his trade Oh a handsome cOmpeIen.
cy. Don't say II word about retirement
he repIiel : it nearly makes me sick To
think Of it. People talk o! retiring from
business while they are healthy. and able
TO work why. l tell you Aleck they don't
know what il means. | didn't know what
it meant until tried it. but nosO retire
ment and misery sound. to my ears, like
words Of about the same meaning
Perceiving that ne had struck a subject
on which he could easily be commune u
tive. looked inquiringly, when he rejoin
ed, perhaps you never heard the parLic-
ulars OF my retiring
eeeded You see. Alrck. it is about three
years ago that. having as you would say.
competency. l made up my mind 10 stop
work and move into The country. So l
sold out my share of the business to my
partner, spent year or more in Iooklng z
at two or three score of country places.
and al last found one that my wife and
myself were considerably pleased with
l.. l. +. IL
shaded. vegetable garden not TO be beat.
and soil Of u superior quality. The place
is still in my possession. but before
would go and live on it again I'd give it
away; yes. Aeck. I'd see it sunk into the
middle of the Dead sea. But am get,
ting ahead of my story. For two or three
months matters and things went ON very
we'll. because / had something to attend
to in making a few improvements about
she house. and in furnishing a number OF
the doors with locks Of my own invention;
but as the whole premises were in
excellent repair when bought them.
soon came to a point where there
was nothing to look after but the
cultivation Of the garden. was not long
though in making the discovery that had
no genius or taste either for digging
around roots or pulling up weeds. and so,
as wife didn't wish the garden to run to
waste. employed regular English gar
dener to carry the thing handsomely
throu9lE ss!-.. - rfi - :.sf-s.E.
We'll. didn't mind the expense he
put me to in the way Of gutno. ne " fam
gled gardening tools. and patent watering
apparatus for | had fully expected TO
spend money. aud thanks to our previous
economy. we had the money to spend :
but Aleck. it was really very amusing 10
see what the fruit and Vegetables raised
from our garden stood us in. Making use
OF the little arithmetic | was master Of, |
recollect that CT phered up some Of the
table hxlns, aud the result " as cucumbers,
seventeen cents apiece: green peas. dol.
lar Hndsthree quartets'i for "a ha.f peck t;
currants, fifty cents a quart: raspbsrries
thirty cents pint beets, fourteen cents
each. and every thing in proportion. All
this cared nothing about. but, somehow,
fell out Of my gearing in not having the
right kind Of employ ment. Wife did her
best to coax me into gentlemanly wats ::
had the old mechanical CRIME all thor
oughly scrubbed out Of my hands-6nger
nails cleaned out and rounded-so as to
make it appear that l. had never done
manual labor. effty
uThen We must get behind couple sof
and and n ponies which had purchased.
on those wRsionabie calls in the daytime
w SSS "7 ID called on ne md xv;fa