Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1858-03-24
From the Berlin Courant .,,-..
How JimzDager- Obtained Witness.

How Jim-Dager Obtained a Witness.
Jed Whitman and Jim Dagger, two
very smart citizens in one of the north
ern counties Of Pennsylvania, were
considered ''some' at trade, and
were particularly happy when they
could make good ''deal in horses
One day, for the want of some one else
to vlctimize, they concluded to trade
horses themselves. After considerable
bantering, they made bargain, by
which they, were to exchange horses,
and Jed was to give Jim thirty dollars
Ito boot. The horses were exchang-
ed, and Jim took Jed's verbal promise
for the money. When the money be-
came due, Jim called upon Jed for his
pay. Jed called him out one side and
talked the matter over. He said it was
all right, but he could not pay just then.
Jim made two or three calls on Jed,
with the like success; at length he be-
gan ''to smell a rat" and came to the
conclusion that Jed did not mean to
pay him. He knew he could not sue
him, as he had no witness to the bar
gain; however, he thought he could
Xix him. Next time he got Jed down
to the 'TCorners" where there were
plenty of witnesses, he inquired of him
If he could not then pay him the thir-
ty dollars. Jed had been expecting
this, and plainly told him that he did
not owe him any thirty dollars, and had
never promised to pay him any such
sum. This was rather a damper on
Jim, and for time he left the matter
IN this shape. Jed would own up the
''corn' when alone with Jim, but deny
everything when anybody else was
within hearing.
Jim finally thought of plan to ''fiix"
jed, which was after this manner: he
procured a large dry goods box, bored
some large augur holes in each side of
it, got couple Of his neighbors to get
into the box, and off he drove with box
and all in his wagon up to Jcd's house
stopped his horses before the door
saw Jed in the yard. .-,r
''Hallo, JEDI said he; ''come here"
"Hallo, Jim, is that you!'' said Jed.
''Where are you going?" .,~ s..,
"Oh!" says Jim, II am going up to
Smiths after couple of hogs"
In the mean time Jed had come out
near the wagon, and entered into con-
versation with Jim ON various TOPICS
Finally Jim said: .. ..
Nov, Jed, how is it, do you calcu-
late to pay me that thirty dollars, or
must | give it up? You know it was
a fair bargain, and you ought to pay
me-
"Well, Jim," said Jed, ''I will pay
you. | know promised you the thir-
ty dollars, and 1 calculate to pay you.
1t was a fair bargain, and l will pay it
sure"
"Well," said Jim, II must be get
ting along, as / am in hurry-must
be home by noon." . ....
He hit his horses cut, and away he
went, drove u short distance above,
turned around and back home he goes,
let out his witnesses, told them to keep
mum for few days and then they
should have some fun. ...z -.
In a few days an officer called on
Jed In the name Of the State, greeting,
commanding him to appear before the
Justice Of the Peace, at the Corners,
on such day, to answer Jim Dagger,
&c, &c. ..-
"Ah, ha!'' said Jed, sscatch a man
before you can hang him.
On the return day Jed went down
to the Corners, sure in his own mind
Of non-suiting Jim. The suit was call
ed, issue .joined-witness for plaintiff,
Bill Smith, called to testify. Jed be-
gan to get uneasy. Vague fears of i'm
pending defeat filled his mind; could
not remember having said anything to
Bill about the trade. He saw the fun
sticking out in the faces of some of the
spectators. .... ............ ..... .,..-
Witness testifes-Down to Jim Da-
gers the other day, Jim said he want
ed me to do him favor, said I would
do it; Jim said he wanted to make a
witness ofme; said Jed Whitman owed
him thirty dollars, and would not pay
him; he had no witness and could not
sue him; and Jed would own up when
they were aloue, but deny it when he
had any one by 'sNow," said he "Bill
want you and Ben Wilson to get in
to box''- -.--. .... .. - ..--
"Hold on, hold on,'' said Jed. s'Jim,
come out here one moment. Court,
hold on.'
Jim went out. ..-
"See here,' said Jed; s'dismiss that
suit. [ acknowledge the ''corn" ]
will pay the thirty dollars and costs;
but blast those box witnesses-they
were too much for me-
A PHILOSOPHICAL gentleman was one