Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1858-06-05
VOL. XIV.
p 0 i r R Y.
MY SlSTER-IN-LAw.

MY SlSTER-IN-LAW.
81 regret to say that relations with this power
| satisfactory ."-Prcsidenrs Message.
| said to myself when | married my wife,
The mother has shut--in the cotliu-her jaw;
| There's never an aunt for plague to my life:
But nh forgot me the sister-in-law
oh yes, | forgot! and assuretly there
When thought was ripe, was wrctchedly raw
Oh yes, forgot! hut I'm safe to declare,
WASN'T forgot by my sster-in-law.
She came ere tle honeymoon's sunshiny light
From the marital sky had begun to withdraw;
She came! and the orb, that beaming so bright
Went out in the cloud of my sstcr-in-law
Twas "only visit to give us relief
From demon Ennuis disagreeabe claw;
| The visits read of are rather more brief,
| She wosnt an angel, my sister-in-law!
Our chamber to spare was exceedingly neat,
With its hens-feather bed and its carpet of straw;
| She took it! and never guest can greet
| With II couch over night, but my sister-n-aw.
| She took the whole house! for the very first sound
| OF attack was a genuine Gallo ecldt;
And soon was my inpotent dynasty crowned
WIN the petticOat flag OF my sister-in-lnw!
knuckcd forever, as though were gt
The boy that | was when knuckled at taw;
found had no representative will
In the absolute shall Of my sister-in-law!
The servants never could manage she taught,
Of the sound Of her voice, most sensible awe;
The brats in the yard run away at the thought
Ot the fierce wicked eye OF my sister-n-aw.
She set up our carriage, whose ponderous weight
Was more than the fnny pony could draw:
The furniture, carpets, the wine and the plate,
We're not to the taste Of my sister-in-law.
And daily at shopping she travelled her round,
In search Of the newest imported kickshaw;
Wherever the silks and the Aces were found
settled the bills for my s,ster-naw.
Her voice, TO my ears. isn't sweet in its flow;
But prince with his hair and a count with his ya,r,
Came often to sing; and I'm happy to know
1t wNs not with my wife, but my sister-in-law
And then there were thoroughbred visits and calls,
With all that is food for socety's nav
As elegant dinners and brillantest balls,
Abroad and at home, for my sster-in-law.
She borrowed my money; and, if it be true
The penny's the jewel that beauties a."
think have done all Il mortal could do,
beauty to make Of my sster-in-law!
She stirred up my meek little wife to rebel
And taught her the use of pish and pshaw;
These bed-curtan lectures, know very well,
Are preached from a text of my sister-in-law
My son Of an heir, from the day of his birth
Was growing exceedingly bonnie and Draw;
think he was rather too good for this EARTH
know he was dosed by my sister-n-law.
Ny girl, who is tender as yet. in her years,
Delights but in irppery, gilt and gewgaw;
If ever mo | adventure, the tears
Bring positive "yes" from my sister-in-law
No comfort for me. for the food that is doled
AT dinner, crow wouldn't put in his craw;
The beef is burnt, and the soup it is cold
We always must wait for my si.ter-in-law.
My afternoon pipe am forced to resign
Aud never at home must think OF a chaw;
The brandy riH leave the decanter, though wine
Is the obvious drink of my sister-in-law.
There's never laugh with that hole, in my sleeve
In stocking and glove there is many flaw;
II buttons are ever sewed on, believe
1t must be on the-dress of my sster-in-law.
A gossip with wife-I never have that
A voice like the note of quarelsome daw
Begins, and the chatters the death of all chat,
AS wish it might be of my sister-in-law.
Alas, for the tyranny sharper men
han tooth of Il serpent, teeth of n saw!
one IL CuCh the " ain Al ~,
And very much pecked by my sister-in-law!
o, | said to myself, when married my wife,
The mother has shut-in the cotfin-her jaw;
There's never an aunt for plague to my life;
But, ah! forgot me the sster.in-law
-RusseNs Magazine