Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1858-03-03
PAT DURKAN,s PIGEONS,

Many years ago, when peace had provoked 4
partial influx Of Frenchmen into ireland IA
happened that one arrived at Kilderhaddy, and
soJourned with host whose name was Pat
Durham. His first breakfast there had been
discussed much to bis satisfaction, and it now
only remained to select the materials for dinner
from Pats ample bill of fare, previous to AN
intended excursion to the neighboring islands.
Fat was summoned. ..f - -.
Vat you have for dinniere ?" demanded the
Frenchman. 80 : -
What havn't 1, your honor, - returned Pat.
why, there e's~Foast an biled and stewed an
fried, an the murphies to the back iy that
again; an its seldom the likes iy them grasses
a Frencbman's muzzle in his own counthry,' -
he added mentally.
man.
.Arrah, be aisy, your honor replied Pat.
tne dlvll resave the taste iv NANCY meat is
under the same roof wild We, barrin the ould she
dog an she neither here nor there in attn,
you know ~
!" Misericorde." calculated Monsieur, some
what discomposed, and not oomprehending the
intent of Pats Phraseology, Manager, say
-" You need not be callin' body names in
gibrish, for all that" said Pat, IAN I'll take
my Bible oath into the bargin, that the sorrow
thatch wild ye"
"Diable." !" cried Monsieur, nearly ont of pa.
lence, "for dinniere, 1 say dinniere ="
"Och, regarding the dinner, is it ?" said Pat;
mesha, sure told your honor all about that
long ago. We've roast, an biled an stewed,
an fried but if you want to know all the inns
and outs Nv the business. why here's the bill
ana your honor may pick and choose for the
matter iv that.
Pat lugged out his bill of fare, which had
been prepared for the occasion by his better
half, and the contents of which he was as Mt
terly ignorant of as his guest, before he had
perused them. In fact it is a matter of specu-
laoon, whether the sum total could at any
period have been made out within a circuit of
some miles-he placed it however before his
guest.
Kos bif?' inquired the Frenchman, as his
eyes caught the first item
-. Thunder an ouns." thought Pat, "I'm
dlshed now altigither intirey-Roast beef.
your honor. troth, thin, would not recon.
mind 1t, bekase you see its long kilIed-long
enough, he added, mentally. q seeing as how
pad luck to the taste iv n dead COW stared me
In the face since ould Moileen's s leg last Christ
mas - %
Veal - rejoined Monsieur
NOR that neither" said Pat; "it's only
stink, your honor-slink, indeed he contin
ued to himself, for its not dead YETI
Pigeons" enumerated the Frenchmap.
g. '"o uue nasal wang, annulling the
''Och sure that's not in it," cried Pat: awbat
the dickens does he mean at all, at all, wild his
pushong." "' WIZ Mo
Pigeons, - reiterated the guest.
Och bother, your honor, sure it's not game
your are making iv me?" said Pat
Pigeons" rejoined the Frenchman, raising
"By the hokey, have it." cried Pat altar
vehement scrafchinn Of =
AN its myself that can smut your honor to a
hair-the PusheeDs! Faith its lucky I thought
~ Nlt-whlileluh ~ And he made his exit in
high glee with bis successful Interpretation.
1t happened that upon this identical morn
ing Pats domestic cat had achieved her ac-
couchment, the event of which had been an in
crease to his family to the extent of five fine
thriving comely kittens, or pusheens, as Pat
would term them in his native parlance. One
OF those was, In accordance as he imagined.
with his guests directions brought to the knife.
dismembered, fricasseed, and In proper time
duly served up for dinner The dish proved
sayoury Monsieur smacked his lips, and on
tne ensuing day, repetition of the precious
article was ordered-On the next day an encore
ON the next de capo ; and so on until, the
sixth, when Pats 'pusheens'' were exhausted,
ne made his appearance before his guest with
an unusually sombre cast of visage
Pigeons" said the Frenchmsn.
- All gone your honor, returned Pat; can
tne borrow one more in the parish for love or
money, barrin the ould cat, that's been mons.
in here these four years come next Patrick.
mas
The cat. ~ CALCULATED the Frenchman.
"What else" cried Pat.
Cat reechoed the Frenchman, with a Wis.
ible emotion of the stomach and countenance,
Pat opened bis mouth, scratched his head,
and looked aghast Monsieur stormed, spat.
and rayed by turns. Pat scratched, and
scratched again, aud at length an ecia,reisse-
ment took place.
We cannot say precisely whether or not the
stomach pump had been invented before this
period, and consequently whether it was put in
on this occasion but it is certain,
that sounds and symptoms would have eyipced
that such an instrument had been used effeo-
tually upon the interior of Monsieur French:
man who had been luxuriating upon, and did
not fail to rccollect, to the last day hf his life,
Pat Durkan's pigeons.