Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1858-10-16
From the Rising (Ncwbcrry) Sun,
The Candidate.
BY SQUIBS.

BY SQUlBS.
Now 1T came to pass, in the second year
OF the reign of james, surnmmcd Buchanan,
that it was necessary to elect three I.awma-
kcrS from the great precinct of Buggville
to represent that county i'll the general as
scmbly.
In those days there was a tribe called
"typcscttcrs," who printed sheets called
newspapers, and of which there was great
number They were common all over the
land, and were productive of both good and
evil.
Now in the precinct of Buggyilc, there
was published paper which was called the
" Hornets Nest, and which had numcr-
ous subscribers.
llowbcit, on the second day of the month
Nissan, in the columns of the Hornets Nest
there appeared the name of Col. pelcr
Squcclcg, who was III great honor with the
Buggyillitcs, as candidate for the Office
of Lawmakcr.
And it came to pass, on the third
day of the month NiSan as Pelce was read
ing the Hornets Nest, he bchcid his name
and was sore astonishcd.
Now Pclcg was very prudent, as well
as wise man. lie sought not diligently
after Office; so this thing troubled him,
therefore he called together his wife, his
sisters, his brothers, his father and mother,
his friends, and he said unto them: Pre-
pare yoursclvcs-listcn while read, and
tell thou mc-what shall [ do?
And Pelcg read unto them, out of the
Hornets Nest, the following to wit:
Mcssrs. Editors: The times demand that
only such men should be elected to the
office of Legislator as are strictly qualified.
men of learning. ability and undoubtcd pa
triotlsm, AS such We would respectfully
suggest the name of our distinguished fci-
low-citizcn, Col. Pelcg Squceleg. He
possesses all the necessary qualifications and
is a mano urcintegrityand sterling worth.
We know of no one for whom we entertain
higher regard, and to whom VIC would more
willingly confdc our interests and welfare.
We hope that hc willacccpt the nomination.
MANY FRIENDS.
At this Mrs. Squcclcg, the venerable
Squcclcgs, together with all the Squecegs
and Squeclcgs friends exclaimed with one
voice, Pclcg, accept for they were highly
eIatcd chat ono of the Squcclcg family should
have been so greatly honored
Now Pelcg was a man of considerable
worldly experience. He knew all about
the Elephant, therefore he resolved to think
twice before he should speak once, so he
laid his head upon his hand, and rumina-
ted in his mind what he should say
The Squcclegs at once took advantage
of this, and pressed the matter hard and
heavy upon Pelcg, and reasoned with him
after the manner of Paul with Felix, of the
honor and fame and glory to come.
AT length Pcleg raised up his head and
replied: Why will ye press this matter
so heavily upon me ?-know We not that |
will have to do many things that 1 would
not. A man that becometh a candidate
hath laborious time, and his days arc full
of trouble. He is doomed to travel all
over the land, go into every nook and cor
ncr, visit every church, barbecue, picnic,
camp-mccting, or gathering whercsoevcr.
lie has to visit every rum-hole treat to
gallons of bald-faced whisky, go security
for every man that has vote, loan his mon
cy without murmur, shake hands univcr-
sally, side with all parties-bc absent from
m,ou ] n "Iai'to Iaft ms @ business, ana nn"ly ne
;lw tho l;fa aF 0" !; %v n"s', ur,iS' Vor-
l;1, 1' Wv '' '''''''''''' 10 'ii"' o' III h''c-
g. t,;s t,o .,l,o
wrotI amJ Ill w." 'i'."p'o ;"n"p Nq"e1'TSS was
INTO pnIon ny Ni,, anr i"o'Isou' hoa' "nu nc solG
of 600 L wy s9", ,'e"i - 'l'c cou,iScl
yon. am mot ;ufor;an i, .'t"u'mS 81 , 10 "'.. as
%nnwetb not % ouah H. tI'in ~ w. 2o" ca WHO
w thot tln % "',S;i =; 'n,'S 40 ''''sG N'o"
bottlo totI,o o w. =" NV - .'o S"'.s nor !ne
w WY 'StoiS. ~ 10 iloI tHe Wise,