Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1858-12-08
WASHINGTON CITY.

A correspondent of the Nashville Patriot,
gives the annexed description of Washington
city, which it will be acknowledged contains
a deal ssmore truth than poetry:''
ssWashington city, the capitol Of the nation,
the home during the term-time OF the PreSi-
dent, (and also the temporary residence OF
five hundred and ten men who confidently ex-
pect to be Prcsidents,) and the seat of the
United States Gas Works, technically called
Congress- is situated in the District OF Colum-
bia-a territory covering horizontal surface
of ten miles square, and extending perpendic-
ularly all the way through. Aseyery place in
the city is three-quarters Of a mile to mile
and three-quarters from everywhere else, w ash
ington is called, in Fourth of July orations
and that style of literature generally, ssthe
city of magnificent distances"
1t derives its name OF Washington from
celebrated continental officer who built the
pine huts and forced his way through very
hard winter at Valley Forge, and made Corn
wallis acknowledge the corn at Yorktown.
The principal public buildings of the city are
the Patent Office, where the Yankees arc
granted the exclusive right to manufacture
and sell India rubber baby Jumpers, doubled
geared rat-traps, Railways Ready Relief
which is warranted to relieve you OF your
money, if nothing else-and other valuable in
ventions of the age; the General Post Office,
where they superintend the mismanagement
of the various mail routes of the country; tho
NdliOudi 1TcaSuIS, du VI iCaiufhSs
which has graduated more men in the art OF
swindling the government than any ten similar
or dissimilar institutions in the world and
the City Jail which is the only public build
ing in Washington which is really devoted to
honest purposes and that is devoted to no pur-
poses at all, both the permanent and Temporal
~ residents of the city being too deeply en-
gagged in their own rascalities to think of pua-
! ishing other people for theirs. '.Grs
There are two monuments in w Washington
one of red granite, erected to the memory of
Smithson, at his own expense, and monu-
ment to the folly, penuriousness. and gratitude
of the American people. The latter is about
sixty feet high, with Though hopeless3 expec-
| tations of five or six hundred feet. 1t is COM
monty called the Washington or National Mon
ument. General Taylor caught mis- death in
1850 at the laying of the cornerstone Of this
structure. 1t is hardly probable that any Of
| his successors will perish at the laying OF the
cap-stone. 1t is much more probable that
Presidents will be done away with at least six
weeks before that event.
The imports of Washington consists princl-
pally of office-seekers and pick-pockets, lboth
of which are frequently combined in one,)
and fast women, who Indirectly make half the
| laws that are put through Congress. Its ex-
ports are disappointed politicians and whis-
key. The latter is generally bottled IN MEM
bers of Congress for transportation.
Taking it altogether, Washington Is an ex-
ceedingly hard place. The public men there
are all very honest and upright, however
that is, until they go home and turn against
the administration, when, Of course, they be-
come like Stephen A. Douglas and John w.
Forney, the most consummate scoundrels un-
hung. We nave the authority Of a number
of administration papers for saying so. Dn-
| ring the sitting of Congress, innumerable
murders and robberies are committed in the
city, but as everybody there is above suspi-
| cion, and wouldn't hurt hair of your head,
nor take the smallest coin from the treasury
| under the most favorable circumstances, the
perpetrators invariably escape detection. I'm
der these benign auspices, il is no wonder that
| it cannot, and has not, been said OF Washing
ton, as was recently said of one horse town
in Kentucky, that if, at the last day, Gabriel
should happen to light there first, the Tesnr-
| rection would be Indefinitely postponed, for
some one of the inhabitants would swlaS 10
him out of his horn before he could make q
single toot. ''-.1