Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1858-10-13

ssAh, yes. Let me see, sir. Hem; bad
case sir bad case. Afraid amputation una
yoidable lancing best thing"
can will yersel' lansh id, sur ~
"Certainly, sir; but it viii cost hall a DOL
lar''
s.Half dollar is id Faith, an it's more n
l have Can't ye give it wee cut for quar-
ter, and long life to your honor ~
ssNo, sir.'' answered /, as If my dignity had
been insulted. ssNo, sir; the charge is usual
ly more; but, inasmuch as | perceived your
situation in life, ! only asked you half price
The Irishman soon came TO my terms, and
accordingly | went in search of a lancet for
the purpose of performing my first blood let
ting operation. 1t was in vain, however, thai
| sought the lancet-it was not to be found,
and | was obliged to resort to dissecting seal
pei which was not much sharper than my own
rusty jack-knife. However, nothing daunted,
and adopting the maxim 'snecessity knows no
law finally clutched the murderous weapon
/ and boldly rushed forth to the operation.
Although my hand trembled as was about
making an incission with the scalpel, did
very well, and | congratulated myself upon
the successful issue Of my first attempt at SUI
gerry.
| The fifty cents were promptly paid, and my
patient took his departure. a week had near
! ly obliterated the occurrence from my mem
| ory, when one morning, to my CONSERVATION
and dismav who should enter the store but
my patient, the Irjshman, with his hand still
| in a sling. Without being seen, lodged be-
| hind the counter, in order to escape the obser-
vation OF :smy patient who walked up TO Bo-
lus, who was standing with his back to the
stove, with the query
| s:Whcre is the docthur l''
81 am the doctor, sir,'' answered Bolus,
.swhat is your wish 70
ssWish is it 20 answered the Irishman, abe
jabers, l wish you and yer lanshin' were at the
devil, bad luck to ye.''
81 am afraid, sir, You have mistaken the
person.
| ssDevil a mistake it's either you or your
twin brother.'
81 have no brother, sir
ssThin it's yersel that nearly kilt"
e.But, my dear sir, do not remember hav-
ing had the honor of seeing you before"
ssOh! We doesn't, eh ~ answered the Irish
man, drawing forth his hand which l had un-
consciously poisoned by using the dissecting
scape (which at that moment heartily cur
sedi. ssAnd mebbe yer doesn't remember
chargin' me fifty cents fer kiiln' me, bad cess
to yer yaller face and pinched jaw, We murd-
herin' ouId thief! Give me my fifty cints-''
cBut-but-but, my dear SIR" said Bolus,
stammering s.you must undoubtedly bc la
boring under mistake. ! certainly do not
remember lancing your hand. Jacob jacob"
ssHere, sir.'' answered /, as | crawled from
my hiding place, trembling for fear the irish
man would recognize me; but thanks to my
did not, and 1 got off scot-free.
"Jacob,'' said Bolus, addressing himself to
me, edo you remember of ever seeing this
gentlemen in this store before.
s.No, sir!' answered /, boldly, for never
told the truth where a lie would answer, and |
had but few qualms of conscience q never
saw him before 20
sThere, sir,'' answered Bolus, turning to
the Irishman. ssYou are undoubtedly labor
ing under mistake"
'.Thrue," said the Irishman, beginning to
doubt himself; ''mebbc IN mistakin', but II
l am must be drunk"
"Possihlv," answered Bolus, quietly.
s.Yis, | must be drunk ard SO the Irish.
man took his departure, believing himself to
be intoxicated.
This unlocked for occurrence somewhat ruf-
fed the usually grave, but peevish Bolus, and
turning to me he gave me ringing box on inc
ears with: 500 wash your face, you dirty lit
tie scamD.'' And these were the thanks re-
. ceived for giving my evidence and getting him
out Of a scrapc ; and | really believe that al
that moment would willingly have given ali
my i'll gotten gains to have seen the freshman
5 return Although complied with the order
without grumblng. still determined to have
= my revenge. and only waited for favorable
5 moment to make practical illustration
had then been Studying chemistry some time
= and knew vol that the slightest concuSSIor
D., would ignite chloride OF potassium, Sulphcl
E and saltpctre, when mixed, and cause an eS
i, plosion and this knowledge determined t'
a use in furthering my plan of revenge
' was not obliged to wait long, and | secret
= ~ chuckled in anticipation of my revenge
A few DAYS after was ordered 10 powder some
G birthstone, but not known TO Boius had pre-
: viously prepared my internal compound.
i Bolus always made it rule to examine m,
e work, and usually gave it the finishing toucl
2 himself, and to make assurance douhy sure,
b | had not half powdered the birthstone when
= submitted it to his inspection; not, however
: until had secretly thrown in handful OF m.
, explosive compound.
e ssDoctor,'' said /, handing him the pcstle
- 81 can't powder this any more, viii you see
i II Is fine enough ?''
;. AS spoke, Bolus came forward, but seeing
G the birthstone barely broken, he returned tn
IS pestle and slap on the ear, (Which duly re
- ristered in my memory. determined TO repa
n with interest } aid told ne if did not poun
: harder he would pound me.
Y Here was nice predicament. If did as
/ was told, would, in all probability, blow m
c fingers off, and so fall into my own snare
It However there never was way to get into
X scrape that there was not way TO get out, Ga
T. least SO it appeared to me,) for instead {
Il pounding the ingredients at the bottom OF tn
q mortar / gave the sides such tremendou
/ whacks. that | absolutely elected the admir-;
e tjon of Doctor Bolus, who soon arose to max
d a second examination. Imagine his surpris
b to behold the contents still unbroken.
v ssWhat on earth is the matter with this, sal
+ he. as he took the pestle from my hand
Il strike the fatal blow, 81 never saw the like.
d In another moment his arm descended, an
/ an explosion such as l never heard before W.
A the consequence blowing his shirt and COZ
sleeves from his arm, and burning him sewers
n ly though not seriously.
s.Waferl water!'' he cried in agony ''J'