New Orleans daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1851-1866, 1858-09-02
The value of a Candid witness.

Some Of the queerest incidents which take place
in court are brought about by the 0btaseness OF wit
nesses Judge Ludlow bad case OF divorce before
him last Thursday, at which Active was spectator.
The plaintiff Mr. Nicely Mr.. Nicely sued Mrs.
Nicely for divorce on the ground OF cTtnl con in
which retired captain the alleged particI-
pator. The case created good deal of interest in
Philadelphia, as the parties were well known and
moved n good society. The prosecution made rather
slow work of their case for some time, when they
called up the last witness, who facilitated matters in
very unexpected degree The witness Wasa coach
man formerly in the employ of the Nicelys He had
come down rough from the backwooda, and was dis
charged because Mrs Nicely didn't consider him snf
fieiently stylish His is Jeremiah Slade. Jerry
took his place in the witness-bOx, gave knowing
look at the lawyers, bowed to the court, and told
them be was ready. ! annex the examination which
followed: You know Mrs Nicely2" do.n7
| q And Mr.. Niceiy?H '' Like book H How long
have you known them u g About year" Now
state to the jury what you know about this Grim.
CASE " ] don't know any such person as Grim Conn
at all kno,C Mr.. Conn Jones, at the St. Lawrence
Hotel. used to drive team for his father once in
the country This reply raised roar in the court.
Judge Ludlow cFammed white handkerchief into
his mouth, and almost stranged himself In the effort
to convert horse laugh into a sneeze. While the
judge was doing this fat jurymau rolled off his
chair in paro&ysm Of the same sort, and split the
back of seersueker coat he had on from the waist
band clear up to the collar. The lawyer, having REL
covered himself from his SURPRISE resumed 4" What
we wish to know Mr. Slade, is whether you know OF
an intimacy between Mrs. Nicely and Capt. Bumper2"
Well, said Jerry rather guess they pretty
tolerable intimate should" All then you think
they were intimate, do you? What was the nature
of that intimacy State to the jury what you ever
sew pass between them.n Spondulix-i0tso of EN-"
" Spoaduhr n exclaimed Judge Ludlow, { what do
| you mean by spondulix ~ YOU'RE pretty Judge,
you are,p said Jerry, looking wisely not to know
/ what spOndulix is2
You mustn't address the court in that way, said
the lawyer E Explain what you mean when you
say that you saw spondulix passing between Captain
/ Runner and Mrs Niraly y Here the lady
prcked up their ears like so many mules in goose
pasture. Why said Jerry, spondulix Is spendin'
money When man amt got no spondulxl he's
| broke. thought every fool knowed plain English
like that. You had ME jest on your crim con-,
old feller, but reckon Tee fetched gou on sp0ndu-
| hri2 Had you seen the merry twinkle of Jerry s
eye as he said this you would have followed the ex
ample of judge, Jury, Active and all hands, and have
INDUCED in the highest old laugh yo1 have had this
season. In trying to regain his C0mpesure the conn
sci for the defendant took drink of q gallon ink
bottle and didn't discover his mistake till the drip
pings fell on his dickey. The examination was then
resumed. So you saw Captain Bumper give money
to Mrs. Nicely, did you Mr. Slade y did sir, y
How much money do you think be gave her ~
4 q Two saw-horsesh 90 And what do you mean by
sawhorses ~ a Why ks, of course-two ten dollar
bills. g And where were the parties when the
money was being transferred Coming out of
the grove back Of Gloucester "And do you know
the reason why Capt. Bumper gave Mrs. Nicely those
4 two saW-horses, as you call them 2a don't, sir.
hearn him say that them ere spondulX would buy
silk frOck like Mrs. Wetherelrs, and she said yes it
would but amt a.gong to swear to anything
more'n this " Humph did Mrs Nicely's dress
appear disordered at the time ~ q Disordered? 1
guess not. II tCas id badly torn, recollect.
Mebby you mean that y do, and am much
Obliged to you for your straightforward testimony.
How did you to see the parties in the grove?'
"Well, was there myself, layin' of under old
tree. an seed Mrs. Nicely a kissin' old Captain
Bumper, and eff you want to know anything further
Jest turn them Wmmin out o. court, that's all III
needless to say, after this that Nicely got YER
dict. Nicely is now free man. while Mrs Nicely is
nobody knows exactly where. Jerry has been
taken into the employ Of Nicely, and made his ap-
pearance on Sunday with more " sponduix in his
pocket than be has had before in whole year. Jerry
is now a lion among his eompeefs, who brag upon
him as the man who stumped one judge and nine at
the "spondulixn he has got are richly earned. Long
may he wave