New-York daily tribune., 1858-11-30

cost TO profit snd loss.
II is pleasure 70 note the growth oil " the arts
" of war and peace" As there is precious little OF
the latter in this city of intense vita!ity-our suPer-
uty of animal spirits continually venting Itself IN
the bloodying of noses and cracking Of crowns
our voice must too often be Of if not for war
Bruising, pounding. eye-buDgpg, proboscl'- haaen-
ine isw.fracturing and rib-breaking however faey
may be regarded as necessary adjuncts OF hish
state of Tammsny civilization, are not very fragrant
subjects for virtuoso criticism in the columns oi
newspaper circulating in families, especially consid'
erins the unfortunate passion Of our precocieus
bows for the fine art of Murder If we must have
sports of the fancy or flash description, 1t Is
certainly creditable to prefer those which involve
no sacrifice of human life, which still has some
yalue notwithstanding it has been so dreadfuly
cheapened in these latter days. On the whole, II
there must be battles, we prefer due!s between
dogs TO duels between men; and if life in any form
is to be inundated upon the altar of public diver
sion. we think il should be life in the form of rats
We suppose that no one will pretend to deny
that the taste OF the town incnes to murder IN
some shape An eminent phianthro eist-that is,
he will be eminent when he advertises In THE
tribune having noticed the infammsble, hom-
cidal mania of our Dead Rabbit opulation--hayiDg
noticed it with an eye fiery with gin and watery
with erief-has philanthropically determined to
found Rat. Killing Association under the patron
age of which any number of murders may be wit
messed without injury, but on the contrary with
great benefit to society. This Friend Of Man, we
beg it may be understood, intends 10 conduct the
rat-killing upon the most refined aud exclusive
principles. He has remarked with pain that many
enthusiastic deyotees of what he terms the quiet
Amusement of killing rats have been obliged to
deny themselves the ennobling qualification "by the
" class of people who generally coDgrcgate at the
"places publicly set apart for the purpose" Places
thus solemny dedicated to rat killers and rat kill
ing are, it appears, too often desecrated by the
dubious patronage Of that variety ofthe race usually
designated the Loafer or by the oheryarietles more
humerousand more ancient than honorable, OF Sneak
Thieves Pickpockets and Brul.ers-all excellent
creatures in their way, but unfortunately through
the deficiency of their early education not fitted to
ornament rat-pit Rstking, whether elegantly
or coarsely conducted, appears to our friend an abb
solute human necessity. We need, he Informs us,
not Tract Societies or Bible Societies, Of which we
have already quite a number, but-to use his own
laneusge--an Association for the Promotion Of
81 all our Propensities and their Confinement with
Is in the Bounds of Reason" For his own part, he
proposes to begin with the propensity for rat'kill'
ing, and its confinement within the bounds Of
L" reason" When the Reformed Rat Institute has
reduced rat-klliDg to reason, he will probably take
up other Human Propensities, whether of the men-
tonabe or unmentonabe kind, and "cOnfne"
them within the bounds aforesaid. But at present
he devotes himself soul, spirit body and breeches,
to the passion for Killing Rats, whi:h springs eter-
nal in the human breast
The Rat Institute first. Then the Cooking Insti.
tute. Then the Bear. batting Institute Then the
New-York Society for the Promotion of Dog fgat.
ing. Every thing in good time. But rats first.
Rat.kilng within the bounds of reason, of pro-
"priety and of social convenience" Rats reason
ably, socially, and conveniently killed by reasonable
and social terriers. The reasonable rOosters and
social bulldogs will follow rapidly. This great
Private Rat-killiDg Association " in every way
worthy Of the Empire City of the Empire State
This, We considerably admit, is no light task for
We have rats everywhere-rats in the City Hail.
rats in the Treasury, rats in the schools, rats in the
churches-rat-cOntractOrs, rat-committeemen, rat
aldermen, rat-constables, and rat judges. The
universal air is resonant with their nibblpgs at the
public cheese. There will be merry time when
the New-York Association for the Extinction of
Rats is fairly organized and in operation; such
swapping, squealing, shaking and hurry skury as
has not been witnessed since the renowned cat Of
Lord-Mayor Whittipgton relieved the ra.-ridden
Court of rat.ridden King We will have all the
rats from behind the arras, and they shall be
dead, for ducat."
Rome and her rats are q, the point Of battle"