Marshall County Democrat. (Plymouth, Ind.) 1855-1859, 1858-07-01
Victim of Mirthfulness,

CONFIDENTIAL DISCLOSURE OF AN OLD MAID.
may safely say that the organ of mirth-
fulness has been the cause of the most of
my misfortunes in life. While still very
small cl3ld, exhibited the propesity of
laughing at anything which struck me as
being ludicrous, no matter when, where, or
how it was.
AT one time I went TO a funeral with my
mother. 1t was the funeral of a young la
dy who was very mucl beloved, and, as a
matter Iof course, lamented. Every one
was in tears, when on turning towards
window, | saw two men sitting, one of
whom was noted for his length of nose; the
other because he had none. 1t was too
much for my risibles-I choked, couhgh-
ed and sneezed-but it would not do,
laugh must and laugh did, when sud-
denly shadow fell across my eyes, and
ffeshly protuberances resembling barbed
hook, travelled some distance across my
nose and 1 heard these words pronounced:
Child you may be the next victim to
the fell Destroyer
This completed my overthrow, and my
mother shaking me violently by the shoul-
der took me home, declaring that never
should go anywhere again, till knew how
to behave myself.
When went to school the same fate fol-
lowed me. l received more reprimands,
and more punishments than any other six
pupils. Once when my teacher had been
reprimanding me, and was just pronounc-
ing pordon, [ looked up, and preceived the
remainder of a pinch of snuff adhearing
to his nose. Then, alas! woe was me that
day.
When our committee came to school, l
was always watching my masters hands
and feet, and the awkward way he had of
rolling over and hanging out his tongue
aud many are the seedlings 1 have receiv-
ed over the schools back.
laughed mr. way from girlhood into
maidenhood. AT length there came a time
to me, as ther comes to all, when l was in
love.
Edward Poyson was youth whom any
lady might De proud to love. He was gentle
and kind, and for some time, was able to
control my laughing genius, while with
kim.
My parents really hoped that had5e-
gun to improve.
One evening he was unusually sober, l
unusually gay. He wished to converse So
berly, | would not and tried to prevent
him from doing so. The more sober and
grave he became, the higher my spirits
rose, till at length l was above the earth,
the clouds, dancing about in tie broad ex-
panse of air. l leaped from one airy castle
to another, till at length my lover, tires and
no doubt disguised, said:
'Amelia!' in husky voice. 4 had hoped
you were the one to control my destinies,
one who would be my companion through
life's thick maze--a friend--awife. But l
see my mistake am friendless and alone,
and l must remain so. Forgive me for ex-
pecting to tame your wild, free spiri. =
You have said 1t was useless l believe
you. FAREWELL! Heaerfter we meet only as
friends
| was amazed-thunderstruck-- but he
was gone. L often met him afterwards,
but he was reserved, and was always gay
trivial in his presence. Oh! woman, thou
art an enigma! when thou feelest most in
tensely, thou seemest most gay! When
thou lowest most, thou affectest to scorn!
Then came another lover, light headed
as myself. He was always joking always
gay. People said, what match!' One
evening he came to me with solemn coun-
tenance, and said:
Amelia have got an idea in my headl'
Don't that feel funny?' said l, which so
frightened the poor man that he was una
BILE to finish. In like manner have
stopped two other confession. Thus you
see that my propensity for making fun has
made me what am a lonely old maid.
l have not mourned my flesh off on ac-
count of it however; but, on the contrary.
l have laughed and grown fat
But still, if some machine could be in
vented by which l could keep my count
enance while listened to another declar-
alton, would be glad to receive the ma
chine and the claration'-Selectea.