Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1858-02-10
ORIGINAL PAPERS
For the Spirit of the Age.
Captain Joe,

Captain Joe.
About Christmas there was bah in the
neighborhood of - in - Co.,
and after dancing jigs and reels all day,
slipping in few Of whist and seven-up,
and topping off with little of the over
joyful, the party doubtless all felt as near
hog heaven as they will do in the next
twelve months. Then was the question
asked: DO you know any thing of Cap
tain Joe All knew some things, vet
their witnessing agreed not together
These christians were: but the re-
hgion about here is worn somewhat like an
outside garment, being useless except on
sunday, and very inconvenient in dancing,
they laid it off during the Christmas holi-
days. And as | was going to say, young
America arose and spoke as follows:
Eight miles north of , as YOU
60 down by way Of Fiddeton, stands Cap.
Joe's grog shop. The house is built of pine
logs, with the door in the back side. Deep
thoughts This has been doggery =
the devils Playground, 10! these many years.
Here at almost any hour in the day may
be seen some mangled skeletons of fallen
humanity, pitching peggy for drink of
liquor. And among this ghastly looking
crowd may always be seen a certain SQUIRE
of the Peace. This squire is too stinev to
buy honorable dram and can YOU be-
lieve it. he is a CHURCH MEMBER He
sits in the Captains grog shop all day,
sometimes leaning against the whiskey bar
rels, sometimes smelling the bung hole and
et.ftafff5.oo IoIrsoc. -. a. Il q
cGtolhef this wav.t t.s =, Gst,es =,
to raise the steam. DtU rs rauof T1ncit
omnia, he often gets too -- to write
his name to peace warrant required in
haste.
The captain himself is large man, very
corpulent, slow Of speech and dull Of intel
lect. He is considered very clever old
chap by some folks, and often uses the
word Bedamned, when talking to night
customers. He is grog-seller by trade,
a church member by profession, and Ju-
das in reality. His business is to sell mol
il he particular how he sells, when he sells
whom he sells to, or what he sells. Water
and liquor look very much alike to mar
up a tree, and when we'll mixed togethe
cannot always be distinguished 10y sobe
man.
Now about Christmas, Cap. Joe is a yer,
popular man, has sleek friends and whit
visitors. The ace Of trumps hold on
That man lying in the road the othe
day had been at the Captains. So ha
that auandam church member, with on
side OF his nose gone. And what shall W
say more Time would fail to tell of a
those men, who through faith in the Cap
tain's whskey, have kissed the dust
street, Rugged the whipping post, slept
the volley Of disgrace, and fought in th
city Of despair And then comes in a Ion
list of mourning widows and suffering 0
phans, all Of whom will rise up and con
forth in the resurrection morn; will theS
pronounce him blessed
But Capt. Joe does not stand alone. i
has certain Squire of his ilk to hold I
his hands. This old Squire can put on
long face on Sunday morning and with
hypocritica sneer, venture upon the thi
bosses of Jehovah's buckler with impuni
And when service is over in the chur
he gets up from the sacramcntal table
his God, walks out in the solemn stilln,
OF the Sabbath evening to Captain 10
rroc shop, and there with his sin stain
conscience reeking with Saviours bio
sits down in the seat of the scoffer.
nv God, where will these drunken chul
members stand.
"Amid the gloriOs of that day
When earth and heaven before the JuO
Astonished flee away !"
The Saturday after Christmas will
the climax Of all have to say at pres
On this day the Captain had shoot
match appointed at his shop; seven
KEYS to be rafled for. Therefore, '
early in the morning, while it was yet d
there was great stir in the camp, m
preparation for going up to the tempt
Bacchus. So when the sun was ri
many wretched specimens of degene
age were seen crowding together around
altar Of common infamy. All stood
common level amid the eventful seen,
this memorable days transactions. CHI
members, gamblers, liars, thieves, and
fame swearers, all good fellows alike. S
were dressed and some were not
had two coats and some had no coat
some had been publicly whipped, and S
had never been before the public in
way However they all worshipped
same god, with kind of spiritual |
incense, commonly known by the mar
bad whiskey.
Now when Cap. Joe reads this, b,
say, I'll make 'em smoke. Just hol
old fel tall court and we will take a :
together. YOUNG LAWYI
Cities Of the Plains, 1858,