The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1858-09-25

!. Says she, Il want you to be with me, or
} can't GO through with it. - |
$50 much the better says I. Jest then
heard horse gallop, and ran to the win
der. 'Oh, LyddyH says |.
'What is't? what is't' says she. 'Oh! oh!
it's him! it's him'
.'Twas him, sure enough-not the bride
groom, but Enos--and he was ridin' like a
madman; and up he turned to the gate, and
over it he tumbled, never knew how, leav-
in' his horse standin' right there without
hitchin' nor nothin', and the next minute he
bust into the house like a lion. Twas down
stairs in minute. Ny stars! l never see
such a hubbub in my life!
'Where is she? Is she married?' says
Enos' tearin' from the Deacon, who had got
hold of him, and rushin' up to me the min
ute come into the room.
'No,' says |, she amt; she's up stairs
waitin' to be, though says l.. hoped he'd
60 rite up to her. and take her andhold her,
spite of all of 'cm; fur twas his right. But
the Deacon took him again, and talked to
him in his palavern' way. and led him into
the bedroom and went back to Lyddy, who
was almost dead with fright, and told her
what had happened. ... $3.50
'What do you think he'll do?' says she,
I wild as a lion. .-... s -a ~
'Iie can't do nothin' with your father alone,
says |; sbut if you're there, twill make all
the difference. Now's your time; go right
down; throw yourself into Enos' arms, and
declare you never will be separated from
him again; that'll give him strength and
courage, and you'll have your own way, sure
rs fatc.'
ooh, never could do it in this world!'
says Lyddy. :l'm sorry he has come! why
did you write to him? Oh dear! oh dear'
sThat made me so provoked with her, !
didn't know what to say or do. went
down stairs. Everybody was tiptoe to know
what was going on in the bedroom. Final
" the door opened and Enos came out
His head was down, and his hat over his
eyes, and he staggered like a drunken man.
The Deacon was behind him, lookin' whit
er'n ever saw him before in my life, and
solemn as death. He kinder stiddied Enos
by the arm, and seemed to be tryin' to say
somethin' comfortin' to him, but his lips
hardly moved, and couldn't hear n sound
come out of 'em, tho the room was jest then
so still you could heard pin drop. He
took him to the door, and then see that
Enos was goin' away again 'thout word
with Lyddy. felt as if It was my own
case, for all the world, aad could hardly
keep from shriekin' right out; but held in
and sprung arter him, determined to have
Just one word in his ea,, if died for i'll
Jest then the door was opened.
'Good Heaveas' says the Deacon, 'what
on 'arth'
sHe fell back, rs if he had been struck
1t hit me jest about the same time, and cen
most knocked me down. The next minute
such cry as everybody set up! and the
minister clapped his fingers to his nose, and
screamed out, 'Shet the door!' Fore that
could be done, though, in stalked the gen
tlemnn from Boston. He was dressed and
powdered, and pomatumed in grand style,
but that made him look only the more ri
dicuous. He didn't seem to now whether
he stood on his head or on his heels. He
was coughin' and holdin' his nose, and
, a stammerin', and a spittin'; while every
body ran away from him, as if he'd been the
arch fend himself. Jest come up smokin'
from the lower regions. The door was
shet, but that didn't make no difference
the fragrance was awful!
The gentleman from Boston has brought
a strong purfume with him. says the little
minister, struttin' around in his white WOO!
wig.
.For heavens sake! says the Deacon,
show did it happen? Phew! Phew.'
Il don't know, cant tel! what SAYS the
poor bridegroom, dodgin around, as if he was
trvn to git away from himself, and putin
everybody to flight, like SO many sheep,
with wolf among 'em. 'As | was comm
sce,' SAYS he, "a little spotted kitten q run
j. nin' on Jest before me, in the dark. |;
) stopped right in my path, and come up to
I'd fna han
'Lord Massyr says the Deacon, sdon't you
, know a spotted kitten from -? Hcav-
ems and 'earthn | would not have had i,
happen for Bless me sir! You'll have
, to step out doors! saint couldn't stand
T this Phew
'How-am have l. says the poor
. bridegroom.
'Yes you have.' says the Deacon; 'and the
, sooner you change them clothes of your'n
, the bettern
'My wedding clothes" says the poor fel-
low, and out he went, to the great relief Of
everybody. But 'hc'd scented up the house
for month to come. l must say pitied
, him, though was glad enough fer any ae-
cident that only put off the weddin'. | had
took advantage Of the confusion to pull
Enos back, whisper my word in his ear, and
send him up stairs to Lyddy, where he was
all this time, unbeknown to the Deacon, who
was so dead beat when he found it out, he
, took his oath that she should be married to
, the gentleman from Boston if the knot had
to be tied in the open air! But half the
guests had gone already, and the rest was
goin': and the little minister had strutted of
in his cooked hat, with his hand to his nose,
aud his tall wife, with her trail pinned up,
n holdin' on to his arm; and now another
, difficulty appcared-the gentleman from
Boston couldn't be got back into the house
agin for any consideration, and it was his
own wish the wedding should be put of till
some future occasion.
'Wu'al to cut long story Short contin-
ued the old lady, 'the gentleman from Bos-
!, ton went back to Boston, and that was the
last We ever see of him, though never
knowed exactly how the affair was manag-
ed. As for Lyddy, she and Enos was mar
ried the same day me and your grandfather
Slade was, six months arter that eventful
night; and guess they was happy enough:
but all that is past and gone, and don't
know as it makes much difference now who
, was happy and who wasn't; for cant think
of q single one out of the number that was
mixed up in the matters I've been tellin'
| about, but the grass grows over 'em now;
I-Enos, and Lyddy, and the Deacon, and
r all 'em; only I'm spared to set here and
laugh and cry over the story, once more,
t for your amusement
The cid lady wiped her eyes and put on
, her glasses. Thanked her Cordially for the
. entertainment tf her story; and the girls de-
clared that she had never told it better.
I've no doubt but the gentleman from
Boston will take it and print it, laughed
, Susy.
'if he does, I hope he'll dress it up in n
little better shape reioincd the cid lady,
sand leave out some Of my bad grammar
-'That would destroy its favor replied;
sthe story should be given us YOU have re-
lated it, or not at ALL
The old lady thought the ilea absurd
, The girls laughed at it.. appeal to the
reader. II his decision is against me, sub
init; protesting, howcter, that the fault lies
in the reporters inability to do justice to
the original narratcr's racy idioms and
quaint dialect. -..--..- ...a.
THE BOTTOM OF THE ATLANTIC.
II k.S hppn aatisfuctorilv ascertnned hv