Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1858-08-28

was not allowed 10 enter plea III Bar, what
may expect from Doctors Commons?
'PoTATo.- o.--That's true. | only hope poor
Lem, though he was in liquor at the time. had
strength enough to give him a punch under the
ribs he was rum customer to the last, no
doubt-but | must say wish his skin had been
fuller DO YOU attend the meeting tonight?
'LEMON.-l feel rather soured at present !
met Running-N inc just now with the invitations,
and he hinted that there would be Il squeeze in
which case / should decline, as they might press
me to furnish-lrink for the company-in fact, it
is always so when they call any of my family to
their aid. But now, to be serious, my sweet,
sweet Potato, if you should 20, let me advise
you not to get yourself into hot water: you'll
be dished to a certainty if you do. Onion, the
strongest friend YOU have on earth, brought
tears to my eyes by the bare recital of what
would be the probable consequences Of your at
tending it. In case of row. you'll both have
to strip-peel off. Now, under such crcum-
stances. he'll certainly excite some sort OF svm-
pathyi whereas the removal Of your ruSset coat
might attract more admiration than pity
Lovely in death. would they say-'PdHida
h,ors etc. Indeed, for my own part, think
YOU do look better in white Oh another thing
! would say: Keep out OF IIorse-ltadishs com
pmy; he will be sure to get into scRpe,
greater one than he imagines, perhaps-and as
for Onion don't let this leak out.l | fear the
rope will end him. | should not like TO get IN
to Il stew with him-so, mum! All here come
Plum and Pear How savage they look
'PEAR-ilOw are YOU. my dear Lemon DO
decide this question between Plum and me. On
referring 10 Johnson, We find my numerical val
ne estimated at two only, while the rascally
Plum is set down for hundred thousand. Its
too absurd; there must be some mistake
'PLUM.-None at all. Please to recollect,
Sir, that | weigh stone more than you.
'PEAR-From that must beg leave to Sc
ccde.
LEMoN.-Stop this fruitless wrangling or
shall be tempted to skin you both, to get at the
truth. I'm not in spirits. As for you. Mr..
Plum, no more of your tart remarks; and Mr..
Pear if YOU wish to be preserved, the less jar
ring the better. Here comes our good friend
Raspberry. How do YOU do, my fine fellow,
and where have you been3
RA>rBERRY.-ln the most Internal jam you
ever saw pom honor, twas insupportable.-
What's the news.
LEMoN.-There is a report which Bush has
raised quite current here, that he served YOU
up in sweet style last evening at tea-table be-
fore a party OF ladies' and the cream of the joke
is that YOU were considerably down in the
mouth.
'RAsPBERRY.-Mere envy. You know he
cultlyates the affections OF Miss Rose Gerani-
um. Ia sweet creature. by-the-bv and has grown
verv much lately y but finding that She prefer
red me- l. . became saucy, which induced me to
beat him into a Jelly. and send him in that state
to his friend Vcnison who lives near Fulton
1 Market.
'LEMoN.-(Puts his bqnds on his hips. oad
| pfaWsl Bravo What a funny limb of Sa-
tan you are. But Ras. have YOU seen old Gar
dener ately2 He'll give YOU deuced trim
ming when he meets YOU He saws YOU ought
/ TO have done sowing v1ur wildcats. and that
although it goes against his grain to complain
of YOUR treading ON his corns he can't stand it
any longer. and must peach.
.RA>PBERpY.- Peach. will hcp And are
these TO be the fruits of nv bearing with him so
! long? He has been picking at me for some
time; and vet it was bu, Yesterday. the migrate
/ ful old rake. that got him out of a scrape with
/ Mr. Horse Radish, who. after Selling him bv
/ the nose threw "A musk melon at his head. eX-
claiming with an equestrian laugh: That ought
to make at least one mango. And 90 he did
that's certain. all to squash.
'LEMoN.-A challenge will cnsue. doubtless
| 'RA,PBEERY-B no means. No one knows
better than Gardener that Horse Radsh shoots
I like the devil in the spring. and one fall he has
alread, received from him. 1t would be unrea-
sonabc 10 - But drop the subject, for here
] Il
pre>>y LOOK.
Mis-. rREE-Good morning. gentlemcn.-
You have heard, no doubt. that have lost those
Young limbs Of mine. Well. perhaps its for The
best; ofisprings are It great trouble and expense.
/ and. to speak the truth, should pine more at
/ the loss of nv trunk Fine growing weather.
| this. Adieui
| 'PEAR.-Pine more! ! should say She is one
of the pine-EaotS There is very little of the
weeping willow about her.
IENoN.-No, the stingy old creature No
doubt she'd have been cut down by the loss of
her trunk-she'd have been chop-fallen then
Instead of pining, she talks sprucer than ever
,I nNlhg ene poor i!'lr 'nnss rhoIuia,ea aver!
,i'ic % i'i1'.ti . "u"iu nav sven .heii suerol'-
% que s''u ,,,' o'i'e. Ias sue was ,!iiS oS,A on
n .lien ne' Wv neiq oonies -'spena AsPell'
MY ~ asliH'e"' Is '''''e al! ''i'''' strange
III .H.,. ',ie WHY r,,.,. H. h s. .,.
AsrhN- IN - ia III sueil huuer' 'int
Gun START % .et' YOU .. our common uaiSef' put
ia " WY e ~ T"' w Vi o''i