Muscatine weekly journal. [volume] (Muscatine, Iowa) 185?-1890, 1858-03-27

800 -
] W sixteen hrlebg joypps, end
Aappy. Yet mine wss no envied lot,
according - fashionable ideas; for no
= - T. s' s:sps'
J(slded Is the tread 81 my bounding
feet. Twas the eldest Of . family Of
eight children. knew that ! was not
needad at home, and day after day, as
I614 NsAly leSk Of n9f9kh md
Witnessed the self denial 81 my mother,
1 lopged to earn my own living. An
opportunity soon presented itself, and
in company with two o. three Of my
sehoslnates, away I went, several miles
from home, to q cotton-factory. My
mother gave me much parting counsel
my father looked grave and anxious ;
and my brothers and sisters gathered
around me and wept; but I resolutely
ehoked back the great, swelling sobs,
with which my own heart seemed burst
ing, and turned for the first time, away
from my home. was successful, |
lived economically; and every month l
placed y small sum in the savings
bank.
One evening was reading in my
chamber, when Nellie, my room mate,
came bounding gleefully in, and, twi-
ming her arms about my neck, and put
ting her face between the book and my
eyes, she said, = Matte, Eve a com
plilnent for youn'
"Hushn' you silly girl, :" lreplicd,
kissing her upturned face /" and take
your saucy head out of my way. You
have interrupted ME in the middle Of
an interesting passage. "
But, Matte, dear, this is real
good one," she cried. Il know you
don't care fig for compliments about
your rosy cheeks, black eyes, or beau
tiful, soft, brown curls. This is some
thing different. Alfred Fletcher loves
you'll" and the saucy girl looked into
my eyes as though she would read the
secret of my heart.
There was no need Of so close a
scrutiny. The most casual observer
might have discovered it, from the
crimson blush that almost burnt my
cheek, neck, and brow, but instantly
receding, left me pale as death.
"Why, my dear Matte, what ails
you ?" said Nellie, in alarm, and stro-
king my cheek.
Nothing" I replied, rising, and
ostensibly busying myself with arrang-
ing the books upon the table, but real
ly taking time to recover my self-pos-
session.
"You haven't told me whether you
we're glad or SORRY" said Nellie. Il
thought you would be glad but you
look so demurely, Pm afraid I was
mistaken"
I was glad, at least, that she had not
discovered my secret. SO, resuming
my seat, I drew her near me and ask
ed her how she had learned what she
had Just told me.
"Oh, he confessed as much to An
drew" said Nellie, g though | knew
it well enough before.''
"Ah yes I rctorted, g the secret
vas exchanged for one as precious,
concerning my own little Nellie. In
that case / fear it will not do to take it
for granted, so l shall think no more
about it,"
IIcr attention thus turned into anoth-
CT channel, I felt sure that she would
not question me further. When we had
laid our heads upon the pillow, there
followed long, girlish conference, in
which Nellie confded to me all her love
affairs and before she had come to
ask my confidence in return, she fell
asleep. l lay awake for long hours,
thinking, until thought became a bur-
den; but towards morning l fell into
troubled sleep.
Alfred Fletcher was the son Of a
farmer Of small means, residing near
the village which had sprung up around
the factory. / had frequently met him
at church, and elsewhere. He was a
year or two my senior. Nellie had Oft
en- scoldcd me for stunning him as l
did, and always turned her off with
pleasant jest; for had I attempted to
explain, or Justify myself, [ could not
have done so. Indeed, it was impos-
sible to find reason for my conduct
towards Alfred. I knew none myself
Why should. / did it instinctively.-
Timid and shy as I was to all, I was q
thousand times more so towards him.
Sometimes when leaving church my
heart wonld leap to my mouth on see
ing him coming towards me. AS soon
as [ attempted to speak, all my self
possession vanished and I was pain
fully conscious Of saying and doing
things for which severely reprimand-
ed myself afterwards. Often had I
sought my pillow, to weep unseen over
some inexcusably awkward act, of
which, at such times, l had been guilty.
l frequently said " What must he think
Of me-" l felt as if arraigned before
the bar Of justice for some criminal Of
fence, as il verdict Of equity" had
been returned. Thus more than a
year had passed since our first acquain-
lance; but never, unit Nellie's thought
less remarks, had dreamed that | low
ed him. Even then it was long before
l could acknowledge lit my own heart.
When, as lay there awake, | had to
confess the fact, I resolved that none,
not even Nellie and much less Alfred