The Feliciana Democrat., 1858-01-09
ANOTHER HARP SERMON.

you've no doubt hccrn before and | now ap-
pear here to cxpound the Scriptures and point
out the narrow way which leads from VAN
world to the streets of Juroosalum, and my
tcSt which | shall choose for the occasion Is
in the eds of the Bible somewhere between the
second Chronicrs and the last chapter OF IL
notify Titus, and when you find it you will
find it in these words:
And they shall gnaw file and flee into
the mountains of lepsidam, whar the lion
roareth and the wang.doodlc mourneth for It's
first born
Now my brethcring, us have before told
you am an uncddicated man, and know moth
ing about grammar talk and collidgc highfa.
lootin but I'm q plain unlarnt preacher OF
the Gospel what's been loreordancd and call
ed TO eXpond Scripter to u dyn world and
prcpar preyerse generation for the day of
wrath for they shall knaw file and ilec
into the mountains of llepsidam, war the lion
roareth and the wang.doodc mourneth for its
first born"
My beluv.cd brccthcring, the text says they
shall "gnaw file" 1t don't say they may,
but they shall. And now there's more'n one
kind of file There's the hand-saw file, rairail
file, double file and profile but the kind Of
file spoken of here. is isn't one Of them kind
neither because it's fggcr Of speech, my
brcethcring, and means goin' it alone, getting
ukered for " they shall gnaw Il file and flee
unto the mountains Of lIcpsidam, whar the
4 lion roarcth and the wang-doodc mourncth for
its first born"
And now there be some here with fine
clothes Oh thar backs, brass rings on thar fin
gers, and lard on thar har, what goes it while
they're young and thar be brothers here
what, as long rs their constitution and forty
cent whisky lasts, goes il blind and thar be
sisters here what, when they get sixteen years
old, cut thar tiler ropes and goes it with q
rush but | say, my deer brectlrin, take care
you don't find when Gabriel blows his last
trump, that you've all went it alone and got
ukered for they shall gnaw file and flee
unto lhe mountains of Hepsidam whar the
lion groarcth aud the wang-doodlc monmeth
for its first born"
And my bretheren, there's more dams be-
sides Hcpsidam Thar's Rotterdam, lIaddam,
Amsterdam, milldam and don't.carc dun
the last of which, my deer brcthercn, is tie
worst of all, and reminds me of circumStanS
once knew in the State Of lllcnoy. Thar
was d man what built him mill on east fork
of Agur creek, and it ground site of grain,
but the man what built it was miserable sin
ner and never Civ anything to the church
and, my brethercn, one night ther come
dreadful storm Of wind and rain and the ioun-
taid Of the great deep was broken up, and the
waters rushed down and swept that mans mill
dam into kingdom come, and 10 and behold, III
the morning when he got up he found hc was
not worth dam Now, my young brethor-
en-, when storms Of temptation ovcrtakc yc,
take care you don't fall from grace and become
like that mans mill--not worth. dam for
they shall gnaw file and flee unto the
mountains OF Hepsidam, whar the lion roareth
and the wang-doodle mourneth for its first
born.'
"Whar the lion roarcth and the wang-doo
die mourneth for its first born" This part Of
the text, my bretheren, is another iiggcr Of
speech, and isn't to be taken as it says. 1t
doesn't mean the howln' wilderness, where the
hard shell Baptist was fed on locusts and wild
asses, but it means, brethcrcn, tlc city OF New
Orleans whar corn is worth six bits II buShcl
one day and marry u red the next whar mig,
gers are as thick as black bugs in spoiled ba-
con ham, aud gamblers, thieves and plckpock-
cts go skitting about the streets like wccscls
in barn yard--whar they have cream colorcd
horses, gided carriages, marble saloons with
brandy and sugar in cnl--whar honest men
are scarccr than hens teeth, and Il strange wo-
man once tux in your beloved preacher, and
bamboozlcd him out Of two hundred and TWEEN
ty.scyen dollars in the twnkling Of II sheep's
tail, but she can't do it agn Ilallcujai for
" they shall gnaw q file and flee in to the
mountains of Hcpsidam, whar the lion roar
eth and the wang doodle mourncth for its first
born"
My breetheren, Am captain Of that fiat
boat you see tied up,thar, and I've got abord
of her -four, bacon and oats, and potatoes and
apples and as good Monongehaly whisky as
You ever drank and I'm nifty apt to Git a big
price for it all But what, oh my breetheren,
would itall be wurth if hadn't rcIidgion
Tuag3 nothil' ike relidgon, my brccthercn,
It's better no silver and gold jimcracks and
You can no more get to heaven without it than
a jay bird can fly without tail. Thank the
Lord I'm an lncddicated man, my brecthrcn,
but I've sarchcd the Scriptures from Dan to
Burshebcc and found old Zion right side up,
and hard shell rclidgon is the best OF rclidg-
ions. And it's not like the Methodist what
expects to git into heaven by iollerin' helfrc;