Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1858-04-10
BIDDY MALOEY,S CAT.

SIatthew Mallory, better known by the bows
at the mill as Father Mat" on returning from
work one evening, was met at the gate by Bid
dy, his better half, in high state of excitement
Mat, says she there's a strange cat in
the cabin"
Cast her out thin, an don't be botherin
me about the baste.'
Faix, an I've been sthriven to do that same
for the matther of ten minits past, but she's list
beyant my rache, behint the big red chist in the
corner. viii yez be helping me to dhrive her
out, Mat ?"
"To be sure l will, bad luck to the consate
she has for me house show her to me, Biddv,
till tachc her the rispict that's due man in
his own house-to be takin' possession widout
as much as by yer lave, the thafe o the world ?'
Now Mat had special antipathy for cats and
never let pass an opportunity to kill one. This
he resolved to do in the present case and in
stantly formed plan for the purpose. Per-
ceiying but one mode Of egress for the animal,
he says to Biddy -
81 Have yez iver a male bag in the house, me
darlint?"
"Divil wan is there, Mat. Yez TUX it to
the mill wild yez to bring HON chips wild, this
mornn''
"Faix, an did. and there it is yit, thin.
Well have vez nothin' at all in the house that
"Troth. an have, Mat there is my Sunday
petticoat-ye can dhraw the stiings close at the
top, an sure it will do betther, nor lettin the
cat be LAWN yez.'
"Biddy, darlint, yere jewel to be thinkin'
o that same be after bringing it to me-"
Biddy brought the garment, and when the
strings were drawn close it made a very good
substitute for the meal bag, and Mat declared
it was d" "illegant."
So holding it close against the edge of the
chest he took a look behind and saw a pair of
bright eyes glaring at him.
And is it there We are We divil? Be out O.
that now bad luck to all yer kin, We thavin'
vagabone We. BE dad, an We won't lave me
house at all wild perlite akin? Yer self-will
bates pigs intirely. Bddy, have yez any
hot water in the house ?"
Yis, I've plinty, Mat the tay kitte's full
of it."
:" Be after castin' the matter Of a quart thin
behind the chist till | see how the SHAY divil
likes it,
" Hould i'm close, Mat here goes the wather."
Dash went the water and out jumped the an
imal into Mats trap.
"Arrah, be the holy poker have EN- Biddy"
says Mat, drawing close the folds of the gar
ment "now had cess to yez, We thafe, it's nine
lives We have, is it /? BE afther akin me for
giveness for the thavin', We have been doin in
me house, for I'm thinkin' the nine lives We
have won't be sayin' We now any way Biddv,
seize hoult of the poker an when | shoulder
the haythin yell bate the dayhghts out of im."
Mat threw the bundle over his shoulder, and
told Biddy to play St. Patricl's day in the
mornin' it. Biddy struck about three notes
of that popular Irish air, and suddenly stopped,
eXclaiming -
What snills so quare, Mat? It's takin me
BIRTH away with the power of it. Och murther,
Mat. sure an We have the devil in the sack"
" Bate tlte ould haythan' thin; yez i'll niver
have better chance. Bate the horns of i'm
lather i'm like blazes, me darlint ~
"Och,' says Bddy, I'm faintin' wild the
power ov i'm Cast i'm off yez, Mat"
"Howly St. Patrick says Mat, throwing
down the sack. Biddy the baste is poe-cat
Lave the house, or yez'll be kilt intirely. MUIR
ther an turf, how the haythan' smills Och
Bddy Mallory, purity kittle of fish yez made
ov it, to be sure, to be mstaking that little diyil
for harmless cat"
MAT, for the love Nv God, if yez be conven-
lent to the door, be afther opening it, for I'm
narelv choked wild i'm. Och, Biddy NIalony,
murthered in this way Holy Mary purtict me
Mat, I'm clane kilt intirely; take me out ov
this ="
Mat drew her out of doors and then broke
for the pump like quarter horse, closely fol-
lowed by Biddy.
81 Sure that yilin bates the divil, intirely
he's ruined me house an kilt Biddy, an put me
out o consate wild mesef for month to come
Och, the desavin' vagabone, bad luck to 'im,"
and Mat plunged his head into the horse-trough
up to his shoulders.
" Get out O. that, Mat I'm narely blind" and
Biddy went to the water. "Och the murther-
in baste" says Biddy, sputtering the water out
Of her mouth, me best petticoat is spite intire-
ly-Mat Mallory, divil trap will liver help
yez sit for cat again"
"Doh't trouble yourself. Mistress Malony,
we've played the diyil as it is. Niver fear ME
akin a haporth o yer assistance. It's nath-
raj fool We are to be tahin' baste NV pole
cat for house cat"
Mat and Biddy went cautiously back to the
cabin, from which the offensive quadruped had
taken his departure. Things were turned out
of doors. Biddy's petticoat buried, the bed,
which fortunately escaped, moved to a near
neighbours. the stove moved outside, and for a
week they kept house out of doors, by which
time, by dint of scrubbiug, washing and airing,
the house was rendered once more habitable,
but neither Mat or Biddy have forgotten the
" strange cat"