Holmes County Republican. [volume] (Millersburg, Holmes County, Ohio) 1856-1865, 1858-02-11

The Snob's definition of the satisfaction
of gentleman -Selfsatisfaction.

The Snob's definition of the satisfaction
of a Observation-Disclosures.
To ridcule old age is like pouring in the
morning cold water into the bed in when
you may have to sleep at nighL-lHerm''
sof the Haymarket.
A wong lady on being asked if she inten,
ded wearing that finger ring to church, said
she didn't intend to wear anything else:
If She kept her word, she must have had
cold time of it.
An editor out west says they don't brag
of the size of their babies, but they are a
most uncommon sure crop.
How could you make thin child fat |?
BY throwing it out of the window it
would come down plump.
A TERRIBLE NAME.-The Indians give
each other terrible names. Lieut.. Hooper
of the Arctic expedition, found woman at
Fort Simpson, whose name was "Thirty-
Six Tongues"
A KNOWING BEGGAR.-A beggar post
ed himself at the door of the Chancery
Court, and kept saying: "a penny please,
Sir! Only one penny, Sir, before you go
imp
aAnd why, my man p inquired an old
country gentleman. Because, Sir the chan
ces are, you will not have one when you
come out" was the beggar's reply. :
At a recent fair held in Polk county, To-
wa, the most noticeable feature of the whole
exhibition was alarge cage, containing two
ferocious wild cats, and on a placard over
the cargo, in large letters, was the follow
ing inscription: @Nebraska Bank Directors
Exhibited for the exclusive benefit Of Ne
braska bill holders"
A Chinese woman, surprised by her hus-
band had just time to hide her gallant in a
sack, and set it up against the wall. The
good man coming in, asked: 'sWbat is in
that sack 2" The woman was confused, and
.hesitated for moment for an answer. The
gallant, afraid she would make blunder,
called out from the inside of the sack
"Nothing but ricew
aWhere are you from :" asked lady of
an Irish woman that presented herself for
the situation of cook
81 came clane from Albany, marm."
"Then must say you had very dirty
passage, for you are far from being clean
saou. - - -
The Rev. Dr.. Humphry, gentleman of
the Tract Society School, who believes the
use of tobacco crime to be preached at,
and slavery not such an one, has written a
tract against the use of the Connecticut
meadows for the production of tobacco.
Dobbs says: aThe best sleigh bells ev-
er invented are pair of red checked girls"
He's posted in the matter.
A HINT TO THE ENTERPRIsING.-Boy
Here you are sir. Black your boots, and
take yer likeness for the small charge of
threepencew
Some one says that dogs bark with such
zeal when one enters themaster's yard that
lone would suppose they owned the
premises, and that their master was only
boarder."
Jones while splitting green wood at Nor
pbet, struck false blow, causing the stick
to fly up. 1t struck hineon the jaw, and
knocked out front tooth. "Ahp said
Bill, meeting him soon after, "you had a
dental operation performed, see." ayes
said the sufferer, "aridental."
"Your husband seems great fayorite
among the ladies'" said Mrs. Jones to Mrs.
Butterwood, the other day. "Yes," said
Mrs. B., "but for the life of me, don't see
where they find anything to LIKE never
could"