The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1858-11-27
50 90 A YEAR, IN ADVANCE.
LESSON FoR SUICIDAL LOVERS.

LESSON FOR SUICIDAL LOVERS.
Richard Gould, u jourueyman harness ma
ker, of this city, has himself been harnessed
by Cupid and driven to, the very gates Of des-
pera,ion. His ens!ayer is young lady
named Charlotte Mathews, whose mother
keeps boarding house on Elm street, and
who appears to have made up her mind to
some more brilliant alliance than that offer
Cd by Mr.. Gould. But as Richard has very
good opinion of his own merits and qualif-
cations, he judged that Charlotte's GOODNESS
was mere coquetry, believing that when ii
come to the scratch, she would cave in at
a moments warning.
He resolved to melt at once the soul of the
artful nymph, and to surprise her into an
avowal of her real feelings. For this pur-
pose he proceeded, about twenty minutes
past five O'Clock yesterday afternoon, to the
dwelling of Mrs. Mathews and stretched him
self out upon the front door steps, holding
in his hand an empty phial, upon which he
had pasted label Of .'strychnine."
Snow there will be an affecting scene
when my captivating Charlotte comes out,'
soliloquized Mr.. Gould, as he closed his eyes
and composed his features to a corpse-l Ike
immobility. Presently Miss Mathews ap-
peared at the door with broom in her hand,
for the purpose of sweeping the steps. On
seeing the recumbent Richard, she uttered
an exclamation of surprise, and then tried
to stir him up with the broom-stick but
finding that he did not move, she called out,
"Mothcr, mother, here's Dick Gould coiled
up on our steps, and don't know what ails
him." "Dead drunk, guess" said Mrs.
Mathews, as she also come to the front door.
sNo, I'll declare if he hasn't kicked the
bucket in reality" said Charlotte, spying
the bottle, and taking it out of Gould's hand.
''See, the fool has been taking strychnine %
"Poor soul, sighed the benevolent old lady;
show natural he looks !" "Ile looks about
as we'll as he did when he was alive" OBJ
served Charlotte, Sand that's not saying
much for his beauty. He never could hold
a candle to Jimmy Hickman, at any time
This Mr.. Hickman is a spruce young clerk
who boards with Mrs. Mathews, and who
happened to come home at that very juno
ture.
When he saw the supposed corpse, James
offered to 90 for the coroner, to hold an in
quest over i" the poor DEVIL" as he called
Mr.. Gould. "Wcll, don't like the notion
of having coroner and jury fellows poking
about here,' said Mrs. Matthews. "No, y
added Charlotte, "just drag the nasty crea-
ture on to the cellar door of the next house,
Jimmy, and then wash your hands and come
in to supper"
Mr.. Hickman took the corpse by the feet,
to do as he was directed, when Gould dealt
him kick which doubled him up like jack
knife. The ladies screamed, and Mr.. Could,
starting up, was beginning to upbrail Char
lotte for her hardness Of heart. but the arri-
val Of policeman interrupted his oratory,
and he walked away, ga sadder and wiser
man, Cincinnati Gazette.
LADIES' RIDING COSTUME.
With the great increase in the wholesome
practice Of riding on horseback which has
recently taken place, we are persuaded that
we sho'ld do great service to our fair read
ers by copying from book rect ntIy pub
lished in England, the following directions
FOR the riding costume Of women:
"Few ladies know how to dress for horse
exercise although there has been grea, i'm
provcmcnt, rs far as taste is concerned, Of
late years. As to the head dress, it may be
whatever is in the fashion, provided it fits
the head so as not to require continual ad-
justment. when the hands would be better
employed with the reins and the whip. 1t
should shade from the sun, and, if used
hunting, protect the nape of the neck from
rain. The recent fashions Of wearing the
plumes or feathers of the ostrich, the cock,
the capercallzie, the pleasant, the peacock
and kingtisAer, in the riding hats of young
ladies, in my humble opinion, are highly to
be commended. As to the riding habit, i,
may be of any color or material suitable to
the wcarer and the season of the year, but
the sleeves must fit very closely; nothing
can be more out Of place. announcement and ri
diculous than the wide hanging sleeves which
look so well in the drawing room. For country
use, the skirt of habit may be short, and
bordered at the bottom a foot deep with
leather. The fashion of a waiscoat Of light
material for summer, received from the
fashion Of last century, is decided improve
ment. and so is the over Jacket os cloth or
seal-skin for wet weather. 1t is the duty OF
every woman to dress in as becoming and
attractive manner as possible: there is no
reason why pretty young girls should not in
dulge IN picturesque riding costume, as long
as it is appropriate. Many ladies entirely
spoil the sit of their skirts by retaining the
usual impediments of petticoats. The best
dressed horse-women wear nothing more
than flannel chemise, with long colored
sleeves. Ladies' trousers should be of the
same material and color as the habit; and,
if full, flowing, like Turks, and fastened
with an elastic band round the ankle, they
will not be distinguished from the skirts
In this costume, which may be made amply
warm by the folds of the trousers, plated
like llghlander's kilt Fastened with an
elastic band at the waist) lady can sill
down IN manner impossible for one incum-
bered by two or three short pstticoats. 1t
is the chest and back that requires double
folds of protection during and after stormy
exercise. There is prejudice against Ia
dies wearing long Wellington boots, but il
quite absurd, for they need never be seen
and are great comfort and protection in
riding long distances, when worn with trou.
sers tucked inside. They should, for obvi-
GUS reasons, be large enough for warm wool
len stockings, and easy to get on and Off
1t would not look we'll to see Il lady strus.
Cling out of a pair of wet boots, with thu
help of boo,-iack and a couple of cham
ber maids. The heels of riding-boots
whether for ladies or gentlemen, should bt
low, but long, to keep the stirrup in it
place."
ALAwYER'S STORY.
Tom strikes Dick over the shoulder Will
rattan as big as your little finger: A law
yer in his indictment would tell you the stor,
as follows:-''And that whereas, the sait
Thomas, at the said place on the year an,
day aforesaid, in and upon the body Of sal,
Richard, against the people of the State o
Pennsylvania, and their d;on;ty did n,oke