Brookville American. [volume] (Brookville, Ind.) 1858-1861, 1858-06-25

invisible wire fences.
p6y- The slang phrase mot a red cent
must shortly become obsolete, for the
new cent is as white as silver.
pa- A wit and fool in company are
like a crab and an oyster the one
watches till the other opens his mouth.
that he may eat him up.
How wisely Nature. ordering all below,
Forbade on womans chin beard TO grow;
For how should she be shaved, whase'sr the skin
Whose tongue would let her chin be STILL
B0- 4 say Pat, what are you about
sweeping out that room ? No. an
answered Pat, Il am sweeping out the
dirt, and leaving the ROOM
b0r Lord Kenton told witness an
grily, that he would commit him. ~
hope" answered he, 'you will not COM
nit YOURSELF
BO- A western editor perpetrates the
following A flock of sheep, composed
Of all'wethers,' may be said to resem-
BILE our climate. f'-
bar If you havo no other way Of
ventillating your bed room, on retiring
to bed, throw the tongs through the
window.
bT A person bored by squirting
man, who persisted in asking questions
about his broken leg, replied, cmphati-
caIly, It's quite crooked-as you see.'
p0- Why is beauty like the engine
on railway Because she draws
train after her, scatters the sparks,
transports mails (males) and makes us
forget time and space.
ra- In Ireland a sharp fellow is said
to be as cute as Powers fox, the fox of
Ballybothcrem, which used to read the
newspapers every morning to find out
where the hounds were to meet.
r6r An old lady, reading an account
Of a distinguished old lawyer who was
said TO be father of the New York bar,
exclaimed: Poor man, he had a dread.
ful set of children
.sa- How do you like mn Il
ed a host, lis IL not well hoppellY 90
well, said Haywood, that had il hop.
ped little further, il would have hop.
ped into water
peT- Said our little Herbert, Of four
years old, to n young man who was stop.
ping at our house, and who wore N
a moustache, why do you have eye.
brows all around your mouth p
p9- A tipsy Irisman leaning against
lamp post, rs funeral procession was
passing by, was asked who was dead
i cant exactly say, sur, said he, but I
presume it is the jintleman in the coffin
B6T- You've destroyed my peace Of
mind, said responding lover TO tru.
ant lass. 1t can't do you much harm.
John, for IL was an amazing small piece
you had, any way
pS- Pray, Mr.. Hume, said Lady
Wallace to the philosopher, when am
asked what is my age, what answer
shall I give p Say, madame, what
believe 10 be the truth; that you have
not yet come 10 tho years Of discretion.
NO. The following is one of the toasts
offered at supper of the printers of
Lowell: M
! Our Revolutionary Fathers-Liko
good printers, they locked mp tho
forms of the Tories and doubled lead
cd the British columns.
p@- During the search for female
composltors, it is reported that the fol-
lowing dialogue took place: Good
morning, Mr.. Henpeck Have you any
daughters that woald make good type
setters2 NO, but | have got q wifc
that would make very fine devil
nA- 'Pompy what am dat goes when
de wagon goes, stops when de wagon
stops, il am no use TO de wagon, yet do
wagon can't 90 with il !?
i CUBS dat up, Glenn
: why do noise, OBJ course
: No. Sam, why am de lawyers zactly
3 like the de fishes p
Fl Il doesn't meddle wild eny sich sub
s iects, Pomp.'
why, don't you see, niger, kaze dcy
i is so fond OF debate
i, rn- The other day Jew was quiz
zing an Irishman, and kept at him un-
Ill he was somewhat aggravated, when
turning round he tartly remarked;
e Yes dom your sowl, IL il hadn't been
: for the like of yecs, the Savior would q
g bin alive now, and doing we'll
r RAJ Girls want good husbands, and
= young men want prudent, sweet tenn
d pered wives No such commodities al
present in the market. Dandies and
fashionable ladies, who screw up theil
g waists To resemble wasp, want com
r mon sense.
M An old lady, possessed OF q fn,
= fortune, and noted for her 'penchant
!. for the use Of fgurative expressions
y one day assembled her grandchildren
IS when the following conversation tool
IS place: My children, said the old lad,
:. 4 am tho root and you are the branch
n es.' Grand ma, said one, i was think
"a ing how mnch better the branches woul'
d flourish II the root was under tb
ground.