Democrat and sentinel. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1853-1866, 1858-10-27
From the Home Journal.
TALES OF THE SOUTH.
THE REPORTER TO THE SENATE.
Ry A SOUTHERN MAN.


THE REPORTER TO THE SENATE.
J. H of Alabama is a humorist Hhd
practical joker, a blind phrenoogist once
examining his head, declared that his organ
of humor was mountainously developed, and
that it had, in fact, swallowed up, or dwarfed
by proximity, all the neighboring bumps.
Right or wrong in his theory, the phrenolo-
gist was singularly correct, for once, at least,
in the portraiture of the leading intellectual
characteristic of his subject. Jonce-for. by
that familiar abbreviation of his Christian
name he is best known among his friends
is the embodiment of frolic and fun. He looks
speaks and acts the humorist. Lean and
gaunt in person, cadaverous in complexion
| and wr'nkled in yisage, he resembles, for all
the world, an Egyptian mummy lie would
! be irredeemably ugly were it not for his eyes,
which are black, piercing and full of the fire
of genius And genias, as we'll chiv
alric gentleman, Jonce most PROFESSIONALLY
| is. He writes well, speaks we'll, talks WELL
and. in short, does all kinds Of brain work
we'll He edits the best paper in the State,
gets off more jokes on friend and foe, and
tells more amusing tales than the wkose edito-
rial fraternity combined.
| He was once State Solicitor in one of our
circuits, and gained more verdicts from juries,
! by his jokes and humor, than the best legal
abilities and requirements. In fact, Jonce
and his terrible battery of fun and anecdote.
struck greater terror into evil-doers than the
! fercest anathemas Of most eloquent philippics
! of associate counsel for the prosecution. He
ouizzeG the witnesses, bamboozled the oppo.
sing attorneys, poked his fun at the bench,
tickled the jury, and. many a time, got ver
diets when he did not deserve them on the
| law and the facts Of his case His whole
| licitorship was the Saturnalia of fun on his
circuit, and as full of forensic triumphs for
| himself as it was of laughter for the public,
and of fines Of imprisonment for the accused
Impelled by the opti.ude of his natural in
stincts and endowments, Jonce wrote humor-
Gus tales and sketches, al of considerable
merit, and, at length, produced book which
brought grin to to the face of the country,
from Maine to California. Under soJri-
quet, which is now the synonym in the South
for a practical jokeo, he embalnlei old B. Y i,
Of Tallapoosa county, for humorous immor
talty The victim, it is said, has never for
given his embalmer; hut the book lives and
ranks deservedly as classic In the depart
ment Of letters to which it belongs
But Jonce's great passion is for practical
ioke-one of those thunjer-claps from the sky
of humor which oyerwheim the smitten party
with laughter, and shake the sides of the COM
mupity for a month afterwards with inextin-
ruishablc mirth He will undergo any
amount of mental vigil and bodily toll to get
up such surprise and carry it into success
full execution Being ct fertile in the
inrcntion and wonderfully adroit in the man
agement of practical jokes, he almost con-
stantly has some affair of the sort on hand,
and rarely fails to draw down cachinnatory
explosion from any quarter into which he
chooses to sail one of his humorous kites
; At the session of 1878 of the Alabama
, Lecislature:s Jonce acted as reporter in the
lsSenate for his own paper. The position ad-
.nits the one who holds it to scat within the
bar of the Senate, and to constant, familiar
intercourse with the members. A man so
communicable and jocose as Jonce, Of course,
soon became prime fayorite with the Sens
tors He was IN fact, sort Of honorary
member of the body, without the right to
speak or vote; but by no means without iniu-
ence in its deliberations. Ever ready, with
pen or counsel, to assist all who needed or
. asked his help. he combined and admirably
executed, the double function of diligent re-
.. porter and adviser in ordinary to the Senate.
Now, the individuals composing the Senate
; of Alabama, however able counsel or ac-
r eomplished in the arts of debate, were never
theless but men, and subject, like the rest o1
mankind, to the appetites and frailties of hui
manity. Being neither teetotallers nor inc
briates, they relshed, the most of them, al
least, an occasional infusion into their bever-
age of that element which is warmer than tea
: and more exhilarating than coffee. The rig
r or of the winter and the tedium of protracted
legislation, made moderate potation as harm
4 less to their conscicnces in an ethical, as i
was agreeable to their taste in a palattd
e point Of view. Besides the regular matutinal
S ante -prandial, post-prandial and vcsper obla
. tions made at the shrine of the ruddy god, b.
q few of the more devout of his senatorial de
d yotees, there were occasional scknowledg
! meuts of his claims made by nearly all of tn
Senators in the recess of the committee room
!. adjoining the chamber of the Senate Thes
o interluded acts of homage, rather furtive i
v character, were rendered during some du
is protraction OF debate or some exhausting ma
d nsuvre of parliamentary tactics, and genei
X ally-by only two or three Senators at a time
x who quietly left their seats. improved the mt
ment of absence, and as quietly returned
J. The supplies for these stolen interviews WEI
G drawn from bottles and petit jugs, whlc
10 found their way into the commlttee-rooms /
!, means known only to tho initiated Despi
,e all this, however be it remembered. the oei
ID ate of Alabama, during the session OF 1897
q was distinguished, as body, for sobrlet