Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1858-08-25
SUI LOyENGOOD'S ADVENTURES In
NEW YORK.


burned eff L know, George; hearn them
say tote him to the Horsespital' I'spect he's
Jined the church, ur the perlce Shootin' owe
strange yarminty critters ain his gifl; he amt
sly enuf an he II git kingdum cum sum day
soon ct ne don't quit that trade. 'Spose he wcr
tu undertake tn shoot ole Beacher. in omen dav
afore witnessis, like he did me, why durn nv
melt ef the pasSon sister didn have his haslet
Outen him, an a dryin' atop of thar church
steePi in mint; ef thar's enything in looks,
she be wus on him nor L wer. But KIN tell
you what becum owe me; jist relyed on these
we're laigs dye see 'em p an tuck up the steps
an started In n mOnstroas fast vile tuck ey pace
down the road, an run inter sum man-an'-
'oman's fool explite at maxim new tangled in
venshuns, an hit few all tangled up, inter the
middil owe the road; while hit wer a sortin' an
straitnln' owe hits laigs an arms, axed
onder his arm, what he calld the cussed grass
hOPper-lookin thing. Hay says he, don't
yer know! Why hits nuthin' but a dandy
Outen Filth averner; hit can't bite, an is tn
weak an withless to run; so pitch in an; knock
jerusalem outen it. III boiler fur you Now,
afore tells what happened thar, L wants tu
talk sum owe my noticin' owe things.
Moth Ca lima am noted fur pole-cats
Georgia fur groun hogs, an Tennessee fur
coons; knows this frum 'sperience; an now L
KIN say that New York am noted in the same
line tur dandys, lido you know the varmint p
owe the pole cat, the rascality owe the coon, an
tne dirty ways owe the groun' hog than jest tu
see one owe these cussed infunel spider laig d
wuthless hxin,s. They haint neither man nur
oman, Gaze they can't talk good nor fight like
mun, or kiss ur scratch feelin'Iy like tuther
Iney seems sorter like a strange wether what
had seed a heapoye tribulashufl among an ekaI
number owe rams an yows-they's butted
about permiskusly by the one an is snuff at
oy tutner; an as they can't fill or feel the in
sunk owe man, nur do the juty owe a 'oman,
they Jest settles on a cross fence atween the
Two, an turns inter the wust kind owe fool
monkeys, despised by wun, an larft at bv
tutner, an the most human view you gifts owe
EN-, Is when they is above you a climbin' mn
Ihey halnt half es smart their chatterin'
kin folks, tur they can't begin tn du what the
monkey kin. L knows monkey mater DOW 'fuI
well. 1 seed one once, an studied hits mater
an gtts, when L weren't skeared he were
pow ful peart tu be a ugly littil beast; / seed
him KILN owe lnsex, an then l obsaryed
what he did with EN-. Now. a dandy baipt
smart enuf fur that; he jst lets his insex run
pose aexpectasbun towards him wer a cumin'
from tarin wild school gal what had seed snow
say about sixteen times, an flowers an leaves
es often, won 'dn't she meet a Disappointment
an then she d jest kill him with contem' t, an
feed the ca kus tn her daddy's work steer what
IS yoked with his bull, in the view owe hit
bein suitable feed fur one in his condishun
They skins an futters roun fool wimmin. list
ike II thin bugs rOun' tuft owe hoIlybocks
only the bugs am six tn thar two, an hes the
zeal at that ON the amount owe fire they ker-
mes, an Whar they kerries hit. L never sees
one but what wants him atween these we're
sich insex "
wen, arter his laigs were ontangled, hit
sed had lnsulted hit, and wanted satisfacshu
Vow, The ldear owe me, natral born durn'd
looi' insultln owe enything what c'u'd talk,
4
hen, by tearin' up her nest an eatin' the aigs
twer mons Gus like fool talk. But tho't I'd
gan mt satlstacshun, eny how, so Idrapp'd ontu
my aiI.fours, sorter behind bit, fotch a rale
hshun boss squeal, an landed both my hine
ieet Onder the fork owe hits coteail.
Now, George; whenever l strai'tens out bof
owe lhese yere laigs tugether, I'd ye see 'em p
kekin' fashion, whatever they hits am bound
u go Jtst then, 50 he riz in the ar an few he'd
lust inter door in the hine aind owe n steam
oOat CABIN on wheels, among a passel owe men
Teadln noospspers, an wimmin with babys ur
org oasklts owe garken truck, dead chickins
an chunks owe meat. You cOu dn't onmixed
all these things, takin' in a few par owe specks
olrd cage or two, an a crock owe flowers in
week arter he lit among EN-. Oh sch
mess, an sch cussin an squawkin' in Dutch
an French, Cherokee, an other outlandish
IIngues' you never hearn since the Devil an
the Dutch, an Tom Dawson fit; the driver-a
Ddid laced, roach NAMED, wall eyed Irishman-'
cum down 0ten the harycane deck an cotch
mister dandy by the collar an the slack. an
sent him up fyin' outen the door agin,
i'"hih MN holesone kick es he went. While
ne Wer IN the ar, moved so es to let him lite
astradI owe my neck; he turned heels up an
he'd down ahine me; | tuck bill holt with NV
teeth on the inside owe his thigh an pav hollis
ontu his breeches laigs, fotch bray an mt
,oNards the rlyer, about es fast es a big dog
kan go With a tin bucket a chasin owe him He
opened IN a voice weak sorter like a sick 'oman.
lust ne cal u 'perlice, then be sed mu 'daw.'
then ne sed sumthin' about 'dwedful yuluaw
pussOns, then sum words about doin' owe things
ne hadn't orter done, an lesvin' ondone things
ne nad orter done L 'speck that wer sorter
prayln IN his durn' d one horse way lie
strung out his words over a heap owe 9round
iur Wer travelin like a fox houp' with a
wolf artsr him; he kicked out in every course
WIN them plpesteIn laigs owe hisn, OWN TO his
skare an the hurtin' wer supplyin' him with.
lux mes oriuI OIL holt when l wants to keep
IL: Him an me looked jist like a trayelin'
Windmill In full blast, with cord of fence rail,
ued 70 the arms by thar middils, a swinyin'
Soout every way: ur a big crawfsh totin' Of a
ouncn owe grasshoppers an long laiged spiders
egln thar will-laigs, arms, heads, coataiis, an
w.ee cnains were 50 mixed an tangled that bit
Wer oeHilderIn' tn the eyes tn foller u.s. He
thought owe the grabbin' game, an snatched at
everything We passed. L run, onbenoyenst
onto ole feller, whose years hung down like a
noun 8 an his cheeks hung down like groun'
sqalrrils jaws when he's a totin' in corn for
winter, an he kerried bis belly in a sling, an
ned white throat latch, an wer fat en1ff In
XII; be jis; squatted, an L straddIed him in
my stride Dandy fastened in his har, am I
1ist wish 1 may be discriminatory durn'd eff be
Gldn tar OF his whole sknlp-didn't leave a
single har-his head shined like tin ball atop
oYe a church. He flung the skin owe ole lard
stands head away, an went ia prabbini auin
lne next he fastened onto wer black miner
net oman he'd round her shoulders: she !
armed wrong aind up; but he got mos: on the |
net; his watch chain cotch on the hook owe her
mIl uubereller, en- hit went along to.. A |
scoupied, duek-laiged Jew, what had !
h"se Just the shape an size ovc a goose-xinc |
ofO@i axe, had a string OF about ten histed umo
.Islsrs tied one below luther, an hung ou,en |
agh Einder IN his loft ontu pole Well, Mr.. |
cfat snatched the handil owe the bottom one. |
On t9tch pole an all. The follower of Moses |