Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1858-04-14
An AMI sing 1IoEy.


Hooper, the editor Of an Alabama
journal, whose name we just now for
get, but which has always something
in it to make US laugh, tells Us the fol-
lowing yarn:
Shall tell you bit Of story, hav-
ing no connection with politics, this
hot, dry weather? By permission
"Old Col. D., of the Mobile dis
trict, was one Of the most singular char
acterS ever known in Alabama. He
was testy and eccentric but possessed
many fine qualities, which were fully
appreciated by thepeople Of the district
Many Of his freaks are yet fresh in the
memory Of the old 'uns Of Mobile-and
all will tell you that the Col. though
hard to beat, was once terribly taken
III by couple Of legal tyre It IS
George Woodward, I 1elieye, tells the
story, but however that MAY be, Il j. in
keeping with others re.ate3 of Tie old
gentleman.
at seems that Col. D. hal q
misunderstanding y iJn tue two gentle
men alluded to and was not on speak
mo terms with them, although I'll three
. ii .h@nl were professionally riding the
circuit pretty much together. The
/ TonG5 ones being we'll aware Of the
ColonePs irascible nature, determined,
as they left one Of the courts for anoth-
er, to have some sport at his expense
by the way. They accordingly got
about half an hours start in leaving,
and presently they arrived at broad,
dark stream, that looked as if it might
be dozen feet deep, but which in real
ity, was hardly more than as many inch
es. Crossing it, they alighted, and
pulling Off their coats and boots, set
quietly down to watch for the old Tar
tar Jogging along, at length came up
the old fellow. He looked first at the
youngsters who were gravely drawing
on their boots and coats as if they had
just had a swim, and then he ooked at
the broad creek that rolled before him
like fluent translucent star. The Col.
was awtully puzzled.
''ls this creek swimming % he growl-
ed after pause Of some moments.
"No reply was made-the young men
simply mounted their horses, and rode
off some little distance, and stopped to
watch our hero.
"Ihe Colonel slowly divested himself
Of boots, coat, pantaloons aud drawers.
These he neatly tied up in his handker-
chief, and hung them Oh the horn Of
the saddle, then he rennounted, and as
he was a snort, fat man, with a Darnch
OF inordinate size, rather inadequate
legs, face like withered apple, and
a brown WIG, there is no doubt he
made an interesting picture as he be-
strobe his steed, with the breeze hold
ing gentle dalIiance with the extremity
Of his only garment.
'SIowIy and cautiously the old gen
tleman took the creek. Half length
and the water was not fetiock deep
Here the horse stopped to drink. A
length and a half, and the stream was
no deeper. Thirty feet farther, and
decided shoaling!
Here Colonel D. reinel up.-
"There must" said he, s'be a hi of
a swift deep channel between this and
the bank. See how it runs. Wen
dash through here"
! sharp lash made the horse spring
the watery waste, and another carried
the horse and rider safely to an oppo-
site bank. The creek WIS nowhere
more than foot docn.
\ F<s,d veil from the y0ua- 'uns an
nounced their appreciation OF the sport
as they galloped away.
''I'lI catch you, vo1l-- raScale,''
Mas ground between CDl. D ---~'~tpetb.
and away he gaIlopoed in hot pursuit,
mnttering vengeance on his foes.
On, on, they sped, pursuer and pur-
sued. The Youngsters lau0hed. the
Colonel damned with mighty emphasis,
while his shirt tiuttered and cracked in
the wind like loose flying lib.
On, on, and the pursued reached the
farm house on the road side. Their
passing startled q flock Of rcs-. e~a-
a fence corner, which, IS IN ..a,.a.
dashed up, met hin .<.sa ..r--cea
wings, elongated ne"l- .i misses Dire.
His horse sWervcd suddenly. and the
Colonel in a momant vas on the GROUND.
in a most romantic heap with his
brown wig lying by his side, and the
.s":.a - 0t - ntheS scattered all around.
ihc white headed children of the
honse came on first, took distant view
/ at the monster, as it seemed to them,
and then returned to report progress
Alter little time the father Of the fam
lily came, and the affair being explained,
assisted the Colonel in making his toll
cite; Colonel swearing, and the coun-
tryman laughing all the while.
''Dressed and mounted, our hero
started off with woeful phiz, and was
very soon out Of sight"