The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1858-03-18
NO. Is
A Startling Confession


The Philadelphia Press, gives the fol-
lowing, among its "Police items:n
I Mordecai Paine, a sadder doing bps;.
ness 10 South Ninth street, was called
home from his work shop on Saturday
morning, by messenger who brouobt
the melaneholly intelligence that his wife
barbara, had taken ar>enic for the nnr.
pose OF committing suicide, and was then
at the point of death lie kastepd to her
bedside, and found Der in more aoonv Of
mind than of body. She declared that
there was something on her mind. which
she wished to confess before ber DEPART.
ure, with the hope of obtaining his for.
giVeness. Mr.. p. with great emotion de-
sired her to 60 on with the disclosure. ad.
ding that she nigh assure herse elf of his
forgiveness before she bad made known
her offence.
"Ah. Mordecai,' said she, "you remem-
Der our large white pitcher was broken
some time ago. [ pretended to you that
the cat broke it, but that was false. for I
myself did it,"
| "Oh, my dear said Mr. Paine, "don't
concern yourself about such triae
bad forgotten the pitcher, and it matters
not now how it was broken"
There is another matter" said Mrs.
T. after some hesitation. ''The silver
spoons which | made yoa believe were
stolen by the Yankee clock mender: 7
pawned them to raise money to pay the
milliner for doing up my pink satin ton-
net"
'Never mind it my love-" said Mr..
Paine encouragingly. 81 hope heaven
will forgive you as freely as l do"
After short pause, Mrs Paine began
again:
Your best razor, which you missed
last summer, and made so much TO do a.
bout, l swapped it away to a pedlar for
a tortoise she'll comb"
"The deuce well, well, said Mr. P.
recollecting himself, "that is all done now.
and cant be amended. Think no more
of it,"
81 could not leave thee with such a thing
on my conscience, replied the fair peni
tent.
"Go, on" cried Mr. Paine, "I told YOU
that could forgive everything at such a
time as this" Mrs. Paine resumed:
"You remember our boarder Simeon
Drake, who ran up bill for six weeks.
and then went off in hurry without pay
ing cent. He and / agreed to elope
together; but be changed his mind at the
last moment, and ran away without me.r
"Flre and fury do you dare to tell
me this 7" cried Mordeca in great excite.
ment. ''Bnt as you are dying, won't
reproach you LII leave you now to set
tie the affair with Jour own conscience. )"
"Stay and hear one thing MORE" cried
the repentant Barbara. ''The dose I
took this morning was intended for you.
| put 1t into your cup of coffee, but in
my hurry to get the thing done, 1 gave
you the wrong cup and took the right one
myself"
"The devil fly away with you, you
jade !" roared Mordecai, as be flung him.
self out of the room. 10 the entry be met
the apotbecary who had sold Mrs. Paine
the fatal powder. This medical man had
heard of the commotion at Paine's house
and su<peeting the cause of it, he came
to administer hope and comfort to the
afflicted
Don't be alarmed, Mr.. Paine" said
be, "the drug | sold to your wife was
nothing but magncsia Judged that she
wished to destroy herself, and l tricked
her 10 this way to save her life
"4ou swindling rascal" shouted Paine,
"How dare you cheat customer in that
shameful manner aDd obtain her money
on false pretences Begone -
And with this exclamation be violently
ejteted The astonished apothecary from
his front door. The man of physic, sus-
pecting, of course the poor Mordecai was
derauged, sent !wo officers to provide for
his safe kcepisg. His relation of the pre-
ceding dialogue, however soon obtained
bis discharge.