Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1858-09-08

zoe Grimes is lead, that good Oldham,
We saII't ne'er sle I'm more;
Hc used % wear . long blue coat,
Al buttOled up lf1se."
l hadn't more'n got the words out NV my
mouth when there cum a pound at my doc-,
that scarf me out Us weeks growth, al
voice yelled O-t crUssCr'l Bgdiam.
Stop that Lolieru' in there sick woman
in next room" Talk ter me Of the shivulry Of
Boston, gentlemen, ar.er this Ter think,
when young woman was q siugiu' her rUr-
tiest, NV calm 1t k0,-'H' that beats out an the
manners ever cum acrost iactOrum Ic0Hc.ud-
ed ter give up the sIugIn' as q bad job, an be-
take myself ter repose but the bother ont was.
l didn't ekzackiy know how to put out that
tandangled sort Of q lamp, up agin the plaster
[ IN. / clOmb up inter a chair tho, an b,owed
an blOwed inter little hole found In tie top
O. the lamp, till my head was all Of a whlzz
did make out ter git the tarnal thing out az
last but when went 10 peek over IN Ter see
I if tie blaze had clean gin out, 0. my stars
such an awful iugo as cum steamin' up my
hose twas enough 10 choke a dog
&c " he ew,' says /, you're a smart un at
burnn', but bleeve III stick at taller candles,
arler all; they dJu't cut up such shindes as
that in the smeIn' line, eny-hOw."
! thought ter goodness l neer should ha' got
ter sleep that night, there was such a h0Ouu'
an hOllerin' Nv boys, an such ap0ppin' Nv ire.
era ,kers, and such a continuous cate-yawlin'
geuraly, at / should about as lives try ter seep
In Bedlam as In Bostun the night aiurc indie
| pendence. l walked up a little arter daybrake,
an Nv all the rackets / ever heard that cuypeI
the upax. Ev'ry bell in town was riugiu', an
evry bov yellin', judgin' from the racket they
made. But gracious goodness, the air Nv my
room was what took nv eye-'twas enough 10
pizen' You. thought 1 should have smother
ated afore got ny wiuder riz, an my head
pokcd out ont.
" The top O. the marnin' tew ye, gran mann
GrZzlctOw," bawiei out somebody from down
the street " how's yer ant Peg Give Us a
lock OF your hair to pizcn rats with, can't ye!"
Don't you think twas that very rlpscailOn
Wv a boy that hooked my portmantoe. l
I squalled cut with all my might for somebody
ter stop thief; but there was scch a ciattcr
that nobody seemed ter hear me, an the boy
cleared ike niggcr. y bunch Nv FIRE crack
| ers was hove up, an went of under my nose
an l thought bes ter draw in my he'd, an say
10 more about 1t tho the air warn't ft Tor no
/ livin' sinner ter Perspire. No wonder the poor
| creatures that breathe it ev'ry day have ter 90
| down ter the sea shore once in a while ter get
out ont.
| hadn't but Jest hanIed in my he'd, when l
hecrd two men a talkin' outside Nv my bed
room door, an l heerI one uv EN- say
"I've traced the smell Ter this here door, an
/ I'm bound ter get in Then somebody rap
ped.
whats wantin'l" says l.
"ODlock the door, an let US come IN about
a mint, will YET says somebody outside.
"Who be yel' says ], hack again tew 'em
''Ihe landlord" says one on 'em; 'let us in,
will yel'
Dear 10" says I; Il couldn't think ont, for
I'm all IN dishybil"
"But we must an VIII crmr in an that
soon, tew, says he, hittin' the door pound,
as he stopt speakin'.
For massy's sake, dew hold on a bit" SAYS
H. whats yer puckerl Wat ill a poor cree
tuT gets her gOwnd on, can't ye!'
"Wal, be spTy about it, them" says be. So
clawed or my clothes eny how 1t cum handy
an opened the door. In they come, an one on
'en made a dive at the lamp, an did zumthin'
tew it. couldn't make out what.
BE We the landlord" says l.
81 amt nobody else" says he
"Wal," saws /, chow much be We a g1in' tel
charge me for putin up here few days o.
''Tew dollars q day says he.
'Sho you amt tho" says J.
YES l be, tho says he.
"Whst an awful Pnee!" saysI I; "neyer heeri
Nv such thing"
Cant help that says he; "it's the regu.
lar price Of iirst-class houses"
"Idon't care so much what kind Nv a H5us,
put up at says /, ''as l dew what sort o
whites git, while Imin it. How much should
have teTPay if l cleared out this m0rninl'
'.Tew dollars Says he.
"What's that for" says I; "hain't been her,
hull day"
"P'raPs not, but you've made purity WORK
, with your gas, q sceutlu' the house up IN this
yvzv,' says he, raul sort o. putchiky, 'au' Il
You had a happened TO have struck loosifei
d IN the night, you'd nave found yourself blew
inter the middle Nv next week. It's a wonder
as It was that you wasn't sufisrcaIed."
0 didn't know no more what he meant thar
the man in the moon, and told him So; and theT
- he explained to ne all about that queer looking
lamp druv up again the wall, We know, till
found out that gas was the kind NV lie the B0s
tuu folks use, and when you blow II out, If yoJ
. don't stopper it up tight, like jug Of empty rs
it'll all lspew out over the top, and make tn,
uastiest sort Nv a smell you ever did see
e Wal iOrked over the tew dollars withou
J any more sdew, an after I'd ct a cookey, al
a drunk q tumbler Nv water, / sailed forth te
yet q look at the city. Come preshus nigh be
, lng knocked inter pie by runaway hoss scar
by crackers afOre ! got inter the common
s Tried ter find place ter set down on, but ever
bench was full. 80 l kept traip>ing round till
was all tagged out, and felt ready ter drop.
: At last l cum tew a tent, with q crate b.
e elephant-a pictur Nv one, mean hangin.
e over it and a man standing in the opening
, calling out: .Waik right in, gentlemen, all, on
four-pencs q sight; walk in
/ thought perhaps l might get 4 chance {
e set down inside the tent; at any rate 'twOuli b
a moustrus site cooler in there than il was IN IN
= bling sun, and so says ter the man Can
wimmeu 20 IN tew =
q Sarting," says he, 'if they wants ter Sc
d the eephant-only four-pence a sight"
Y So, when had paid him the money, he pas
E. sed me right in. I did feel sort Nv streake
10 when l see l was the only woman in the tent
Nobody there but parcel of men folks laughin
~ and talking, and carrying on all manner u
ie ways l was a good mind 10 turn back mt
Is straight, bat sort Of hated TO lose my money
wurh, ami so l asked one Nv the men which sid
- Of the tent the elephant was.
= "Hooray - said he, there Is a woman want
D. ter see the elephant, pass her along, pass he
b along"
- At that one hits me push, and another hi
. me push, tail l cum 70 a little sort Nv c0un
le ter, and cute looking chap, all-kilhngly dre;
IL sed, up standing behind II. He wore big bou
T zumPin, stuck in the ends Of his stock, and hi
q; hair was all Nv a bristle.
Woman wants TO see the elephant say
two OF three OF the men right behind me
Z. Then the man behind the counter handed m
I'd a glass NV sumthin that smelt strOngerd all q
out Nv sort Nv ticker, and says he "Tou je'
swaller down this little sniiter Nv scheedaI
kerchitOoate without stOppin to bite It Of the
4 open your eyes tight, and if you don't see tn
ly elephant, my name amt Ralph Rattletrap.'
N "No, YOU don't, says I, ''Palm of eny Of you
loo woody uIZen on this IndIVIdOOal-
an 'Spunky, says one Nv the men, for one that
H. Just come deOwn.'
D. Then the rest on 'em stomped, and hoote'
md ~. III. s.Lr rr-- .ravv critters | va