Cleveland morning leader. [volume] (Cleveland [Ohio]) 1854-1865, 1858-10-05
MORNING LEADER.
For the Leader.
First Year of the Reign OF James the ".


had jOurneyed long way from the East, to-
ward the setting sun, and who Rad taken up
their abode on the beautiful prairies, and in the
fertile valleys of the West in that part of the
West called Kansas, were sOrely oppressed by
the said James the chief ruler he James being
advised thereto by Lewis the chief scribe, and
Howell, John, Isaac, Aaron and Jeremiah who
were placed under him in the realm.
Now James the chief ruler was old and well
stricken in years, and had been provided for
many years at Kings palaces, and Jared sump-
tuously every day, and being past the age of
the love of women, and withal near-sighted,
stretched his vision to behold all the country
round about, and by reason of his distorted
vision his eye that looked toward the North
and there beheld free and happy people, with
great many churches, and institutions of
learning without number, and that the people
were intelligent, and very strongly attached to
principle that had been taught them in their
infancy by one Thomas who was a great man
in his day, namely "that all men were created
free and equal, and endowed by their Creator
with certain inalienable rights''-now when he
saw all this his eyes being evil, James the chief
ruler could see nothing 10 admire in it ALL But
James remembered one lesson taught him in
his youth which was that knowledge is pow
err" his knees trembled and his entire frame
did shake with fear, and be said in his heart,
| THIS as not as it should be. This people are SO
intelligent they will not support any measure of
my administration, that may be in accordance
| with my evil disposed heart.
Now James being more eyil-disposed than
any that had ruled before him, with his other
eve looked South, and there beheld patriarch
al institution that made labor disreputable, that
prevented the diffusion of general intelligence,
/ that had direct tendency TO mix races, that
released its vOtaries from all moral restraint,
/ that was well calculated to abolish all foolish
ideas Of freedom, and destroy every yestige Of
/ liberty and equality, to destroy the ancient
landmarks which he James had most sOlemnly
sworn to support and maintain, and with all
| this James was well pleased and said in his
heart, TRis IS as Il should BE- This peculiar
/ institution, patronized by my friends, aud, SO
| elevating to the AhglO-SaxOn race, must be per
petuated, fostered, sustained and extended, and
/ as this is what my friends have made me Chief
Ruler to accomplish, / must set about the
work.
And it came to pass that James the Chief Ru.
Ter set himself diligently at work to extend
the peculiar institution all the vast praires
and fertile valleys ofthat region toward the set
ting sun where those men and women that had
/ travelled from away down East did sojou-n, and
/ had pitched their tents. Now James from the
evil of his heart could not see anything desira-
bic or lovely in having that lovely region to-
ward the setting sun peoPled by the children OF
/ IL -. -. l. =,
| stitutions OF learning, that believed and had
| taught their children 70 reverence the Sabbath,
to respect whatsoever things were pure, lODely
/ and Of good report, and that God had made OF
| one blood all the nations Of the earth. But
James remembered that these dOwn-Easters had
| DESTROYED witches made wooden nutmegs, and
basswOOd cucumber seeds, and that somewhere
away down East there was a place called Hart
ford where convention had once been held,
but above all James remembered that the peO-
pie Of that Eastern portion Of the realm and
who were called Yankees were opposed to the
peculiar institution he beheld when he looked
South, and that instead Of choosing him fol
chief ruler had done much to make one John
Chief Ruler of the land.
SO it came to pass that James laid heavy
burdens upon those men and women that had
been trained in that part of the land and had
Low pitched their tents towards the setting sun
those men and women who notwithstanding all
their attachment to the Almighty Dollar were
go ianatical and old fogyish as to believe thai
Righteousness exalteth a nation while san Is
reprOaeh to any people, and that all men belong
, to one common family or brotherhood and have
rights which Others are bound TO respect
, Now James the chief ruler sent men elOthet
, with authority from the Chief Executive anC
! those in authority under him-tO cause thes'
men and women to cease from their labors, 70
! the land upon which they had located was con
secrated to the use Of bis friends and those o
the peculiar institution. But it came 20 pas
that when these servants Of James came TO tina
: goody land, it very soon could be said OF then
= as one of olden times, lis Saul also among tn
= prophets
Now this caused James much anxiety, an
after due deliberatiOn IT was thought best L
: bring this people into the family Of States an
!, that this must be done without their consent
? for if they had any voice in the matter the pc
! culiar pet of James would be excluded froT
I that land. So James set about doing the wor
lf in the most satisfactory manner to his friends.
Now it came to pass that certain Ofthe friend
of James, and under his special patronage, cal
N ed upon the Great Sanhedrim Of the nation I
Of permit them to come into the family or StatS
as with a fundamental law that they had gOtte
:, up and without the consent of the men in th,
region and James was over anxious to have Il
III Sanhedrim carry out the scheme.
: Now il was so that there was one msmb,
ne of the Sanhedrim who came from that part
the land toward the setting sun, one Stephe
who had formerly been a great man among b
Ie people, and whom many OF the people wantG
Id should be the Chief ruler instead of James,
he Now Stephen was a mighty man of valor, al
m had many to 10 his biddings; to whOmsOever
said 90, they went and to whoever he said com
al he came Now this Stephen had by some ey
u disposed persons sometimes been called ArnOl
re and Stephen, not having the fear Of God befO
lie him, and not having very great measure
kind feeling toward James the Chief Rule
u was very wrOth at the idea that James shOu
in endeavOr TO set aside as worthless an old hObl
,ol horse that Stephen had rode many years, CALI
an Popular Sovereignty; and Stephen, with q
on help of one Samuel, Buckeye, and other mer
lal bers of small conscientiOusness, raised gre
an row and caused great CONSERVATION for tin
m In the ranks Of the uaterrifsd Stephen Tdv
n and wanted the people OF that far of Weste
he land to have a voice in the arrangement Of the
ut fundamental law. The Sanhednm was mul
~ agitated, and loud anathemas were utter
ms against Stephen and his friends, and after
mighty struggle and Stephen had been denOun
We ed as a traitor, and read out Of the list
,te friends Of James the Chief Ruler, by tho
ar that adhered to the measure Of the Chi
,or Ruler; that It came to pass mat the Inen
IN Of James the Chief Ruler remembered th
lse they had in their possession an instrument th
nd always, when used. gave certain sound. I
be name of the machine it was difficult to detG
ess mine Some called it Harp with a thoC
lsy and strings" others the q Bugle," others
no. name except DissOiHfiOn Of the Union Ho
me ever, the friends of James in the Sanhedr
of bethOaght themselves that they had this lnstI
ment, and that it had never failed when
an, notes were heard to effect the desired object.
rn- Now this instrument was very peculiar M sor