The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1858-12-01

new papa" because they could 1--we at home alC
have all the playthings, they wanted The ne"
papa as soon as he could speak, remarked that Au-
gustus and James did not much resemble Reuben
and Amelia
well, no." said the happy mother, "my first hus
band was quite different style OF man from my
secend-cOmpleXlon, temperament, color OF mar ana
eyes-all different"
This was too much. He had not only married a
widow, but was her third husband, and the aston
isked step father eff four children
ssBut the fortune thought he, 1that will make
amends" He spoke of her fortune.
"These my treasures, says she, III the Roman
matron style, pointing to her children
The conceit was quite out OF the Michigan
der who, finding he had made complete goose of
himself at retired to farm in his native State
where he could have chance to render his tboys
useful and make them sweat for the deceit prac-
ticed upon him by their mother
When living in the Mediterranean, near Malta, ear
ly one morning, we saw ship passing near US. 1t
is a moment Of great interest when two ships meet
at sea, and many were our numerous inquiries. vi
what nation is she? Where fromg Where bound!
When all at once she hostcd her colors, and the
stars and stripes foaed Ger her, OH what thrill
of Joy passed through us, as we saw once more that
star-spangled banner! We love it at home, but none
know its beauty feel its worth till they see 1t in
foreign clmes, or in foreign seas and as we behold
it waving by the side of the bloodred Moslem ri-
colored Austrian, with mingled feelings of thank
fulness and pride We point to it and exelaim, 'Ihe
Americani-a name honored the world oyer--the sy-
nonym for enterprise, liberty, power!
Soon, too, it foated from masthead. Ourfrend
then lowered and raised his thrice our captain did
the same and thus vessels salute each other at sea,
as much as to say, Good morning: God speed you
on your way" We knew not the name of the stran-
ger but we had met friend, and with light hearts
proceeded on our voyage.
Reader, smile, kind word, pleasant 'tgood
morning. cost but little, yet often they are worth
more than silver and gold. You may not know the
individual, you may never see him again, yet you
may have sent streams of sunshine around his path
way, which made his heart leap with gladness, and
sent him on his way rejoicing "1nasmuch as ye
did it unto Of the least Of these my brethren ye
did it unto me. "
Many Of our readers have heard of the "Frst fami-
lies Of Virginia; but few, take it, know how the
term originated. An exchange explains it thus
In the early settlement Of that State, it was found
impossible to colonise it unless women went there.
Accordingly, ship load was sent out, but no plan
ter was allowed to marry one of them until he had
first paid hundred pounds of tobacco for her pas
sage Whent the second ship load came no one would
pay than seventy five pounds for the matrimo-
NAL privilege, exceptit were very superior article
Consequently, the descendants of all those who were
sold for one hundred pounds of tobacco ranked
as the first families, while those who brought but
seventy-fiye pounds are now ranked the second
families; and the reason why one ever find any
of the second families, is because you can't get
Virginian 10 admit that his mother only brought
seventy five pounds Of tobacco.
No medical society could be imposed upon as once
was the London Medical Society. They were au-
thentically informed that sailor had broken his leg
and it had been cured in three days by the appca-
ton of tar and oakum They Immediately broke
the legs Of such animals they could get. bandag
ing them with tar and oakum, but the legs did not
get well; and they wanted to break some mans leg
to test this wonderful cure. Finally they wrote to
their informant to learn if they had used the right
kind of tar and oakum, and in the right proportions
He assured them all was ght and added in post
script, that the leg, being of wood, tar and oakum
was probably as good any thing they could have
used whatever.
Master Toni say, Gran'ma, this is bad job
about thu comet!' ..
Gran'ma-"Good gracious! What's the matter?,
Master Tom-EWhy, here's letter which says:
stThe particles of the tail, if thrown out from the
head, having only, as before, the of orbta
motion the head, and having larger and greater
orbits to describe the further they removed from
the head, will necessarily fall further and further
behind they recede from the comet and thus form
curve independently OF resisting medium; and that
1.-THE panic allaying doctrine of the tenuity of comet
c nuclei cannot be maintained from the mere fact of
their truslucency." [Gran'ma collapses.
society has lately been formed at Bordeaux to put
down the supersttious of evil onens. As every
body knows, it is bad luck to begin any thing on
Fridayor to sit down at the table with thirteen-or
to balance your chair one leg or to spill salt be-
tween yourself and friend, the society pro
poses to have regular dinners on Fridays, to have
Just thirteen guests, and to turn leg spill salt
all around before commencing. In the one whole
year during which i'll luck has been thus defed no
single fatality has occurred to any member.
Major Brown; some years ago, occupied seat in
the legislature of one of our western States. The
subject of general Improvement was being discuss
ed, and among the rest, bill for improving roads
before the house. The major "spread" him
self hugely in favor of the bill. Pointing out the
beauties and benefits of roads. why, gentlemen
an, ~. L. L.
as Decline, sir; and, gentlemen so straight that
you can see red dog mile long, sirt'
An ingenious lawyer being employed to contest
WILL made at eighty-iwo years Of age, powerfully
wrought upon the feelings Of the jury to destroy
Its validity; the most prominent argument was tina
the old man not only trespasser upon time Civ
ing more than three score years and ten,
ed the statute of limitation and consequently had
no right to make his will at that age
An Irishman, who had lain sick for a long time.
was one day met by The parish priest. when the fol
lowing conversation took place: z..s.
well, Pat, l am glad you have recovered-but
were you not afraid to meet your God?'
"Och no, your reverence, it the meetin Of that
other chap that was afraid Of replied Pat.
A dandy lately appeared in Iowa with legs 50 at
tenuated that the authorities had him arrested be-
cause he had visible means Of support.
.Mr. Jenkins, will it suit you to settle that old
account Of yours?" mo, sir; you are mistaken in
the man. am not one of the old settlers
since tnOu cannon De Wholly happy, take III LII
GOOD part that thou art not wholly unhappy
When Canning's health was drunk at the minis
ter's Blackwell dinner, he replied: .Gentlemen,
this is fish dinner; SO, after sincerely thanking you
for your good wishes,g do not that do better
than follow the example of the fishes, who drink
good deal, but never speak
1t is easier to still the wave of passion than TO
break the dead of indifference, which, like the
lake Asphates, destroys the energies Of all that APP
proach it, until like the birds who said todrop
leless its dull surface, the heart sinks rise
more.
The most ingenious plea of an old beggar was,
that being too old to earn living by his hands,
he was obliged to the hands of Others Just so;
all who live upon the labor of others are nothing
but beggars with this dfferenee-the one beseeches
and the other enforcesl
An exchange tells story of a negro boy whcfell
into hogshead of molasses, and wonders if they
licked him when they took him out.
Il know am perfect bearin my manner" said
fine young farmer to his sweetheart "No. indeed
you are not, John; you have never Rugged me yet;
Ill han hoa