Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1850-1859, 1858-07-16
Mrs. Blifkin's Baby.


As soon as he came into this "brcathing
world" as the late W. Shakespeare has it,
he took command in our house. Every
thing was subservient to him. The baby
was the balance wheel that regulated every
thing. He regulated the temperature, he
regulated the food, he regulated the SER
wants, he regulated me. For the first six
months of that precious existence, he bad
me on an average of six times night.
"Mr. Bifkins," says my wife, "bring that
light here, do the baby looks strangely;
I'm so afraid it will have a fit ~ OF
course tho lamp was brought, and Of course
the baby lay sucking his fist like little
white bear, as he was. "Alr Blifkins,"
said my wife, 81 think l feel draught of
air; wish you would get up and see ii
the window is not open little, because
the baby might get sick" Nothing was
the matter with the window as knew very
well. "Mr. BlifkiDs," says my wife, just
as was going to sleep agaiu, "that lamp as
you have placed it, shines directly in the
baby's eyes-strange you have no more
consideration arranged the light and
went to bed again. Just as l was drop
ping to sleep again, "Mr. Blfkins," )" said
my wife, ,"did you think to buy that broma
to day for the baby ?" "My DEAR" said
l, "you will do me the injustice to believe
that | could overlook matter so essential
to the comfort of that inestimable child ?"
She apologizcd very handsomely, but made
her anxiety the scape goat. forgave her,
and without saying a word more to her, |
addressed myself to sleep. "Mr. Blifkins,"
SD my wife, shaking me, "you must not
sn're -; you will wake the baby" "Jest
so-Jcst so'' said |, half asleep, thinking
. was Solon Single. "Mr. Blifkins, said
my wife, "will yu, get up, and hand me
the warm cruel from the nurse lamp for
baby !-the dear child if it wasn't for
his mother, l don't know what be would
do. How can you sleep SO, Mr. Blifkins?"
al suspect, my dear" said |, "that it is
because am tired" "Oh, it's very we'll
for you men to talk about being tired"
said my wife, 81 don't know what YOU
would say i: you had to toll and drudge
like poor woman with baby" Itried
to soothe her by telling her she had no
patience at all, and got up for the pcsset
Having aided IN answering the baby's re-
quirements, stepped into bed again, with
the hope of sleeping. Mr.. Blifkins, said
she, in louder key. said nothing. "Oh
dear - said that estimablc woman, in great
apparent anguish, chow can man who
has arrived at the honor of live baby Of
his own, sleep, when he don't know that
the dear creature will live till morning ?"
l remained silent, and after a while, deem
ing Mrs. Blifkins had gone to sleep, |
stretched my limbs for repose How long
| slept | don't know, but | was awakened
by furious jab in the forehead by some
sharp instrument. started up and Mrs.
Blifkins was sitting up in bed, adjusting
some portion Of the baby's dress She had
in state of scmi-somnolence, mistaken
my head for the pillow, which she custo-
marily used for nocturnal pin-cushion. |
protested against such treatment in some
what round terms, pointing to several per-
forations in my forehead She told me |
should willingly bear such trihing things
for the sake of the baby. Insisted upon
it that l didn'. think my duty as a parent
to that young immortal, required the sur
render of my forehead for a piu-cushon.
This was one of many nights passed in this
way. The truth was, that the baby was
what every other mans first baby is, an
autocrat-absolutely aud unlimited. Such
was the story Of Blifkins, as he related it
to US the other day. 1t is little exag-
gerated picture of almost every mans cx-
periencc.- Saturday Eceniny Gazette.