The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1858-05-08
Sam stackpOle's Adventure.
BY SIMON SCGGs. JR,

lou never Hearu Tell OF my InOIaSSes
| candy adventure, did you, Squire" said
| Slackpoe to me when called at his house
to take the census of his family. | shook
! my head and he proceeded. a. speculate it
was rayther wonderful affair, and if Sally
| there would tell you it you would expreciate
it certain. was courtiu' Sally at the time.
ard was in love up to my eyes. But her
old daddy was opposed to me out and out.
| And he vas the stupendous man--the cross
ost, ugliest old varment that ever were spec
tacles. and have often wondered how Sally
could be such a charmi: little creature with
such a crusty old felio for a father. She
was magnum bonur1 gal, sure, at that
time little faded now you see, but that's
to be expected. Beauty is only skin deep,
but ugliness goes to the bone.
Well, one day | went to town and
bought a whole heap of fancy doings, rib
bons, beads, goodsc grease for the hair, ct
cetera and SO forth. l was determined to
coax her up, and putting my purchases
snugly in bundle, | locomoted coward her
daddy's house, true as a rifle.
1T was rather late when I arrived. and
old Scraggs was blin' sum molasses candy
for Sally to peddle next day-there bsin' a
show in tewn-Sa!ly and her mamtuy hav-
Jag retired.
The fust thing done, however arter
enterin' and old Scraggs had stared at me a
few, was to sit right down in pan of hot
ruelasses, he'd put on a cheer - cool, which
made me jump and howl anazin, but as he
did Mt see the accident, squatted on SaIly's
band box, which contained her SUNDAY bon
net-not noticin-and went to rubbin ike
sixty-sixl Well, arter | d so. there spell
groaning for myself and wondering how
/ II. II 4
me another such terrific look and iad:
sam Starkpolc, what have you come
here artcr--ay:'
"Mr. Scrac.s,' scz !. rot DARN to stir for
fear he 4 discover wv rredicament, " We
come here On very important business. iOa,
Lorav, how that mrI'asses s,uaitra ! and
I you II keep your ebeneezer dewn ..bout
five minutes, I'll cnlesvor to inform you
with that degree of accuracy that | III SO
prominently and couSpicuously de-eloped.
The old fellow did 1T understand that
ar powcrfui language, and in corse he did Mt
say uothin', and so | kept easy as pos
s5b'y could and went on:
"Perhaps, SAYS |, " YOU We noticed that
| have been pain numerous atten>Huus u
your daughter, and | am gratiiied TO stat
with infinite popularity. Now, if you :.
give sally to me, III vote for you for Gov
ernor, and leave the country if YOU a!n't
elected"
well, after I d delivered myself in that
ar benevolent stysl, what do yoa think the
old coiger's reply was? Why, instead Of
saving take Sally and welcome. hs actually
pinted to the door, and told me 10 :cItter |!
| vow got out OF patience, then, sure, an !
did Mt care then what occurred-1 Sally 5
bonnet was smashed
Mr. >cTagg>,' 81 I, 81 should be happy
to oblige you, but the fact Is, ! sat down
here and can't leave, nOiiUw, unless yca cut
a hole in my trowseis."
"W hen the old man see: how was stu K
fast as I set, he Jet c&;chei up the hull pot
Of hot candy eff tie fire. and empued il all
over nv tead and shoulders, true | an
alive, JchU, how the stuff made me cavot
and holler, but was so mad that grabbed
great COB and let lin have it b.I-rite
tween the ewes.
There. take that" sez 7, "you old flap.
cared piece OF deformity!" and then start
ed for the door-direct. | jest got it open,
ready to dart, when old Mrs. Scraggs burst
into loud laugh and sally spoke for the
fust time.
"Sam Sackple," seq she "hoI. Ny
banIbox and your panta!oons are GEEcret.
Jerusalem. s,Z /, aUd / !eaPvC. l
must been awful skeered, for | landed al
least twenty feet outside the house, and ran
like prairie fire. | never looked beh nj me
/ till next mornin, and when did, .he kirer
Of tie baadLor ,ols stschihe .tast TO my troJc-
serS.
Thai was my mcrl.syes candy adven-
ture, Squire, right hot work It was. But
married Sally at lsst. The cid man gave in
after a while, and now You can reckon NJ
the family in your sensus As you please