Preble County Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1857-1859, 1858-09-23

how hot 'twas-Sot round with forty
| leveu tables. some on 'em covered with
nasty plates an heaps of fish-bones an
potater skins beside NV 'em, an several
men, with whitish aprons on, clearin
off the dirty dishes, an putin on clean
ones. Then there was some more men
a cookin' all sorts NV thing S, at queer
kind NV stove stretchin3 aWay1ong on
one-side o. the room. Gentlemen kept
coming down the steps, an settin' down
ter the tables as though they felt per-
feckly ter hum, and callin for this and
that, and tother thing; and eating as
though every mothers son Nv 'em
he'd made bet that he could swaller
his vitels quicker than airy othe, man
O. en-
At last 1 got raul sick of waitin, for
twas past one O'Clock, an was gettin
hungry myself though l did mt ekzack-
| " like ter take some O. the cookies out
NV my basket, an go to eatin' on 'em,
with so many men folks about, an ev'ry
on em starin' away at me as though [
he'd mt no bizness to be there at all. So
up l goes to one O. the men at was a
cookin, and made him kerchy, an says
I-''SarYen, sir"
"Whatll ye hev?" says he whop-
ping a monstrous great slice Nv beef
stake off Nv gridiron on tew platter,
and hackin q CRATE cash intew it, ter see
if twas done.
"Be ye very full, jes' now?" says L.
''Not quite so full as we was" says
he, lookin at the empty tables.
Il don't mean down here" says l,
''but overh cad -
"Dunno nothing about up over
head, said he.
"Wal, can you tell me- says I,
"where L can find the tavern keeper!"
"What tavern keeper says he, a
starin' at me with mite and main.
why, the landlord NV the tavern, up
over this ere Kitchen" says ], pretty
sharp, for [ begun ter think he was
reglar stoopid, and didn't know B from
broomstick.
This is an eatin' suller," says he,
short as pi-crust, ''an' there amt moth
in bat toe doctors Office, and pot'e-
cary's shop, and bcdbug and cock
roach sterminator's baz.,ar, aad ! rat
trap EN- pJlTum, on the fust il5or above
Goodness sakes alive" says l ':you
don't say SO; then where has that pesky
boy gone to with my portemantoa?'
1--WE don't keep no boy" says he;
"an if you've got one, you'd better
keep an eye on i'm, that's all I've got
ter say"
An at that, he turned round tew a
fellcr that was fryiu' tripe, an said
somcthin tew i'm about some woman
or other that seemed to be a goin' crazy;
[ should ha' liked to hev asked who she
was, an all about it, but was so took
en- up with my own oufortynit sarcum-
stances, that l couldn't think Nv other
folkses cousarns.
"'Twan't nay boy" says I, "only one
L cum across in the road; an he offered
tew show me the highest road ter the
tavern, an said this was one, and now
what do you s'pose he's gone and done
with my portmantoe?'
"Hooked it, most likely" says he.
go massy on us" says I, an my to-
ther gown an all my go-to-mectin' fix
ins in it; what shall L dew2'
"Speak ter the polease," says he.
"Where is it?" says [, 81 can't waste
my time no longer botherin with the
likes Nv you This amt no place for
wimin, nuther.'
1 thought that was purity strong
hint for me to be a goin, an go [ did;
an l hain't sot eyes on my porteman,
toe from that day to this.
Wal, man with frock on, driyin
load of hay, did make out, at last, ter
show me the way to the tavern; an
mighty stylish place twas, tew.
l went up the steps, an raped. No
body cum ter the door, or even bid me
"Walb in;" SO l made bold to go right
straight in. 4 man in the entry shows
me up tew denominations long flights O
stairs into nice, large bed room, with
harnsom woo!cn carpet on, the floor
Bym by, CRATE big bell wenta tarin
about the house, up stairs and down
stairs, a ringin, o, my!-wus an little
Bughorn's did, that time the poor crea
ture got afoul Nv 4 hornit's nest Ar
ped at my chamber door, an said dinner
was ready. Purity time for dinner,
thinks [ ter myself, but however, [ fol-
lered a hull parsel of folks down stairs
intew a big room, and sot down to a
crate long table. Purity quick, one o
the men that was loafen around the
room cum anu sot plate ot-dIsh wa
ter, as nigh as could make out, right
afore my face an eyes, and then sloped
[ made out ter worry down few spoon
fuls ont becos everybody else did
Then man from behind reached over
and grabbed it away again, and asked
what I'd hev.
81 didn't see no great shakes Nv Wit
ties ter chuse FROM, says I, looken up
an down the table; "nothin but salt an
potates an green's
"Ill bring you whatever you call
for" says he; 'jest look at your bill o
fair"
"Where is it?" says I. He reached
over and pushed little printed paper
right afore me.
'Land sake" says I, ''I'm so awful
nigh sighted that could mt make out a
wurd Nv that fine print, if twas ter save
my bason. Wont you be SO good as to