Delaware gazette. [volume] (Delaware, Ohio) 1855-1886, 1858-09-03


"You'd aggravate saint, madam ex-
claimed Mr.. SmugRins.
"Do saints upset chairs in that way!" was
the meek inquiry
"Mrs. Smuggins,' said the male proprie-
tor of that euphonious name, confronting his
sleeping partner.
"Weii!n
'Will you make me pudding or noll"
"No!"
"You wou't!''
"Don't bother me; I've told you once''
81 fancy, Mrs. Smuggins, that you ente red
into compact to obey me-" said her shame
fully deceived lord, beating the "devils tat
too on his best carpet.
81 won't be ordered was the reply
And the lady, with great deal of dignity.
picked up her traps and tiounced out of the
room.
ileman was in the kitchen.
"Suke!" he said, furiously, snake me
currant dumping tor dinner-plentv of cur
rants.''
"Why, sir." said the young lady. "here's
one a-bilin'.''
Mr.. Smuggins was in the same dreadful
position that we could imagine certain ed
itor to be in when deprived of es'griev ance."
He was fairly 1abbergasted-idealess, word
lass. With the exception of nonsense
which came lee s.tv forth.
"Well, look, sir. for yourself" said Susan.
aMissus made it with her own two hands, an
hour ago."
And there, sure enough, bobbing up and
down, was a glorious sized dumpling-the
species Of dumpling on which he doated.
Considerably moIlified. yet filed with a
sense Of a aSEronged husband, he proceeded
to his aifeonn yaiaaaln.
s.ssI sssla9n la....al9 Of 2 he began.ss itseems
there 6 - - sSrsding afisr ALL
"Is thsre!' s~ss5>the echo.
sYesssnaaaus. !. and it is lucky for you that
SIS it resHy5" was the provocative re-
sponse.
"Yes madam, it is. In fact, you dared !
not--no, Mrs. Smuggins, dared not have |
disobeyed me. You knew that it Was made I
and wanted to give me specimen OF your
"I-p-d -e-e-d!" replied Mrs. s. with sus-
picious emphasis. s'Now, if you don't leave
the room l will; all that I've to say is, that /
| won't be ordered!" And she went to an
other room, slammed the door and locked .
it.
Mr.. S. boiling over with Indignation, con-
soled himself as he went down town with .
the fact that he had gained his point, and /
that his currant pudding was boiling too.
Dinner came, and SO did the injured hus-
band. DINNER is the time to bring 'em .
honey He sat down, said nothing, looked /
daggers. and pretended to quarrel with the !
tenderest of tenderness. The fact was,
however, that he was reserying an enormous |
corner for the dumpling
The dumpling came. Mr.. Smnggins un- /
did the buttons of his vest, drew himself half .
a foot nearer his work, and handed his plate i
saying. gruffiy:
"Give me some of that.''
"You can have it all, my dear,'' was the
he mild acquiescence of his wife, ae she I
pushed the dish gently towards him.
"What's that!" he shouted.
'sThe pudding. my DEAR was the sweet
-eply.
"What the--have you been doing with
tt" he frantically demanded.
sit rolled in the ashes, nay sweet love-
on know you said this morning that dar
ed not disobey you. No more | have, my
lear. There's your pudding--eat t.''
The specimen of eoniagal obedience dis
appeared suddenly out fihe room with hear
y laugh. Il was lucky for her that t he
ioor was on her SIDE, and bad been left ajar
expressly fos prompt exit.
Mr g aasd naov n hiohlv ;rnn.o~oJ sLs.r,
IN the impuIse Of the mesaent; however, he
was TOO much Of a philosopher to let his pud-
ling cool, SO he cut ID open and scooped out
he middle.
He then went down town, and gave lit
lie boy lick on the head for presuming to
slip down against him.
He didn't go home to supper, bet step
ped over to Thompson's and then went o
he theatre. About ten O'Clock something
n the play seemed to tickle his fancy amaz- {
ngly, for he scratched his head, as though
IN idea had suddenly taken root there, and
Imiled. Hamlet touched the conscience of |
i king with play; had play touched the
conscience of Thomas Smuggins! 1t look
I'd like it, to judge from analogy; for the
ting alluded to did't depart quicker than he
Ind. The main difference between Mr.
smuggins and the cowed blackguard was
hat the former made his exit with grin on
lis phiz and the latter didn't.
Mr. s. carried his smile home with him,
md up to his bedroom, where Mrs. s. was
making paradoxical preparations, by disem-
herself of luggage for a trip to
Blanket Bay.
'"Deuce take it,'' said he, few minutes i
within an olive-branch creak in Z
is tone. 81 say Mary, do you know where
ny night cap isl 1t you do, | wish you
you'd get it for me; that's good grl'
ITO be sure ] will, Thomas,n was the
esrty response. "Ah! here it is." q
"Thank youn {
"Look,here, Thomas,' said Mary, laying n
er hand gently on hisarmi tive had words c
o-day; hope they will never meet again! i
We haven't been together very long, aud {
rs msy ss well just make upaour minds to
tart straight, or we shah BE couingin some G