The weekly Ottumwa courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1857-1872, 1857-05-28
ssNine Cheers for Old Zim y,
OR, BREAKING DOWN THE SYSTEM.

scene is laid. The time was the year 1910
when party spirit rose I30 in the shade, in ev.
cry hamlet throughout the length and breadth
of Uncle Sans glorious domain. The respec-
tive parties met at Bugsbury, (the county seat
and made their nominations for county officers.
As there were many aspirants for a few NOM
inations, it follows, as matter Of course, that
there were some bitter isappointments--to no
one more than "Oid Zm,o who was confident
of getting nomination for sheriff.
Zimmerman-or Old Zim, as he was famil-
iarly called--was miserly old codger, who
i was well 10 do in the world, yet he was up q,
} every cqnoention for nomination for some
thing, from slime whereof the memory of man
runneth not to the contrary" He was reputed
wealthy--that is, he owned farm, and had
money, but be never showed the color of it,
except when he unfortunately got on spree
and then he would sow it broade ast-but that
was only biennial occurrence.
A few evenings after the nominations above
noted, knot Of the dissatisfied were congre-
gated at the Black Horse Tavern, discussing
the merits and dement's Of the fortunate NOM
inees.
.'Gentlemen," said Old Zim, e'merit and long
service is no Recommendation in this country.
The wire-workers and schemers have it all
their own way"
"But, gentlemen continued Zim, ssthey will
fetch up agin snag or sawyer one of these
days. Yes, gentlemen, by the Eternal, I'll
upset their apple and spill out their peach
es. I'll see whether it is the people or set
of broken down political hacks as makes the
county nominations. By Ju1as, I'll run as a
volunteer candidate for sheriff, and if don't
lay 'em out, then my name aini Zimmerman
that's allv
| This determination was received with favor
by the crowd, and Zm sealed it with a'shalf''
for red-eye.
Full soon he was in the field, announced by
a card, in both papers, to his fellow-citizens,
pledging himself TO discharge the duties of the
office with impartiality--in case he ,Ous elected.
! Right Justify did Old Zim 60 to work, and
things appeared to 60 on swimmingly. He
canvassed the county, and the people were
profuse in their promises of doing their best
for him. In one Of these peregrinations he
met Wattles, the nominee of Zim's party, who
was also on lectioneering tour.
"la, Wattles - said he, s;my fine fellow,
I'm sorry to see you allow yourself to be the
tool of an unhnly and corrupt cabal--l am
sorry to see you sacrificed but I'll beat you !;
the patriotic freemen Of this county will not
bear dictation. so, my friend, If you wish to
save yourself the disgrace of defeat, you had
better resign in my favor"
Waltles expressed his own conviction that
he should feel very much used up in case Of
such an event, but at the same time had made
up his mind to stand the hazard of the die.
Election day at length came, and my worthy
friend, armed with hat full Of tickets, sta
toned himself on the ground Of his own pre-
cihct, and commenced dealing out his own
tickets, and urging his claims in the strongest
kind of way. Miser, as he was, he made his
friends swim in Monongahela long before the
polls were closed.
The election over, evening came apace, and
the expectaLts gathered in the bar-room to
await the counting Of the votes, and the re-
turns to come in from the different townships
Old Zim was hourishing anG treating the crowd
and expressing full confidence in the success
Of his effort to break down the system.
Seated in . remote corner were number Of
wags, in low but earnest conversation, and
any one might have at once concluded that
something was about to follow.
Consultation soon broke up, and the plot be-
gan to develop itself. The clatter Of horses
hoofs was heard or the frozen grounds soli-
tary horseman rode up in front Of the door,
and flinging the reins over post, rushed into
the bar-room, where he was raised 70 the top
Of table, and commanded silence. li
j "Here," said he, drawing strip Of paper
from his pocket, "hsre are the returns from
Lower Buffalo towhship-Wattles 5O--Mc-
Gregor 4O-Zimmerman l90--majority for
Zim loop t
ssNine cheers for Old Zim!'
aHurrah hurrah! hurrahp'
| "Gentlemen,o said Old Zim, taking oil his
hat, "Pm obliged to you for this expression of
lyour-that is to say, let US take horn all
round"
4 OF course the crowd acquiesced in this prop
osition, and the welkln rang with loud huzzahs.
But bark! scarcely had the crowd imbibed
before another horseman came galloping up to
h the inn. - s's
"Beegum township, 100 majority for zim.
4 merman!'
4 "Nine cheers for Old zim %
"Hip. hip, huzzah!" .s.s..s ..s.'s
The excited candidate was wild with JOY
and excitement he again invited the party TO
} drink.
i Another horseman came--another, and still
snother-each one bringing an overwhelming
majority for Old zim, from TIE township be
represented. y af.
/ Alas! that il should be some mad wag under
various DISCUSSES, that brought Old Zim the
i glorious news. The column, as footed up,
! gave Old Zim . thousand majority.
Il Didn't he spend a cool thirty? The land
J lords till graaned under the weight Of Old
Zim's deposits. @ las .s
, ssGentlemen,' said he, 'smy heart is full
, (hia head wasn't anything else) and can only
/ say that the glory Of this contest belongs te
| me. but L feel q (sbrick in your hal, ? said ,
4