The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1857-01-21
~ I'll 4 CHARMING G WIDOW:
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ST Wonder if there's any more of 'ein?

/ Er
Mrs. Insden was d pretty young wild
ow. At rather early period of her natu-
raj existenc she was united in the holy
/ and indissoluhle bonds of wedlock with u
fashionable young southern gentleman,
who few years afterward, had the good
sense to blow his brains out, and, leave
his handsome young wife the sole sarvi-
wing heir to his name and extensive debts.
So it was said. Rumor-the many-ton-
gued scandal-inonger--s sometimes limited
that the Young gentleman aforesaid had
received efficient aid in the operation of
removing the contents ofhis cranium from
one who asserted prior claim to the
Iady's hand and heart, but upon this del
icate point we are not to decide. 1t mat
ters not to our present purpose whether
Mrs. Insden's husband blew his own
brains out or whether some other
party performed this pleasant little
surgical operation for the husband, or,
peradventure, (Which is not improbable)
that the husband never had any brains
In what ever way it occurred, Mrs. ms
bden, as most other pretty young widows
would have done, managed to survive the
shock.
Mrs Isaden was not rich, beyond the
Inheritance bequeathed to her by the la
mented companion of her bosom, which
the reader will bear in mind, was not of in
es Unable value. She, however, was the
possessor of another species OF wealth,
highly esteemed in the matrimonial mar
ket, and much priced by all unhappy
bachelors and rich widowers who seek
therein for dear companions to smooth
their cares aud shirt bosoms. Mrs Tns-
den was pretty. She could lay claims to
no small share of those charms of feature
and person which SO often cause bifercated
humanity to suffer from an unpleasant pain
in the region ofthe stomach, The outward
SYMPTOMS. of which are deep sighs, melan-
cloly looks, and preparations to commit
suicide. Without giving any particular
description of her personal appearance,
suffice it to remark that Mrs. Isi,den was
| a most bew,tchirg creature.
Fascinating Mrs. l.!
Her beauty was her capital CONNER
cially speaking it was ali the capital she
had) and she resolved to invest it to tie
best possible advantage Having heard
THAT Chicago was a wonderful place for
! spectators, only half we're annually sent to
the States prison, she determined 10 come
hither and try her luck She came.
| Like skllful angler Mrs 1nsden haied
her hook and sat herself down to waii
patiently for. nibble.
Men are like fishes. With little shrewd
coaxing they bite at any bait which
wears a giittering appearance, corner lots
and fat Offices not excepted. Like other
innocent and well meaning gudgeons,
they seldom perceive danger until it takes
takes them by the nose, Women are al
so like fishes in this respect, but widows
belong to different species from all the
rest. They are the nibblcrs which take
the balt but never touch the barb. @
Occasionally men are met with, who.
from ex 2erience, fancy themselves skilled
Ito angle III all waters for all sorts offishes.
They are usually what the world can fast
men, sporting men, fancy men or moral
| men. Sometimes they are bankers, some
times doctors, sometimes lawyers, some
times judges, and sometimes follow various
other callings, from which peculiar circum-
stances we arc led to the belief that en-
dowments of this nature are not the gift
of providence to any particular class-a
/ fact for which mankind aud the Democrat
ic party ought TO be duly thankful. Such
man was Mr. Uterck We say auas, for
] lalthough that gentleman "still lives" and
/ is likely to live for an indefinite length OF
time, lie has lost both caste and confidence
among his more intimate associates, fol-
reasons which willappear in the course Of
this narrative. BY all his acquaintance
he was regarded as quite invincible among
1 the ladies; indeed, we have been confident
1ly assured that, like the adjective appella-
tions made use of to distinguish such old
lfogy heroes as Charlie. naag'ae, Richard
C6eur de Leon, Alexander the Great, and
Jones the Cobler, his very name was indie
ative of his character, being derived from
lit. When yet tender scion beneath the
parent tree, he was missed on one occasion
from the patcrnal domicil, his worthy pa.
ternal progenitor not previously knowing
that he was out. On his return, she affec.
tionately inquired where he had been
ITO see the girls ~ was the heroic reply
of the youthful wonder. "What r' ex
claimed the astonished and Indignant
mamma as she proceeded to apply The
palm of her hand vigorously to the young
Igentleman "what to see, the-oh' yoa
Turk!
4 Mrs. Insden first used pious bait
She went regularly to church. three time.
! every Sunday, attended all the evening
prayer meetings. and joined the Ladies
: Society for the Diffusion of Sharpe
Rifles in Kansas" Being member of til,
/. .censultations committeep of this societ,
"a committee composed of males, who's
dnty and special privilege it was to holt
/. frequent consultations with the sisterhood
, particularly those who are good looking
Mr.. Uterck was. of course privilegedt tt
/ lattend its MEETINGS. privilege ofWhicI