The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1857-11-21

the counterfeit darkey fraternity. had been
upon the lcvcc yesterday he might have got
a happy wrinkle in his lire from the perform
ances of the genuine colored gentry. The
carte for this entertainment was burlesque
auction sale. One of the darkey men, select
ed for his tongucy qualities, mounted a box.
and in good set auctionecr phrase announced
to large asscmblage of idle negro laborers
that he was now about to offer them. for cash.
"to de highs bidder in dis crowd, fus rate
boy, \ l. soun al healty. an warranted not
to cut in de eve. balk in de step, nor steal
chickens dat don't long to him; also. Iitional.
Gis boy wars only one par shoe Il year, an
d,,s good at dc cend of it; tak,s kccr on his
close particklcr. an nebber gees cortin': don't
90 to sleep cher his work, is 'spcctful an
bedcnt is six foot tree inches high. weighs
two hundred an twenty pounS, an can Go
more work in de house or i;cl dan any odder
two niggcrs; sides he eats less dan any oder
one nigger. Step up hyar, sam. an show
Yourself to desc Ycmmcn. I.il'clv now. Dar
he is. gcmmcn. 'Mire him f,r yourselves. -
And the sable auct;oneer pointed with tri-
umphant gesture to the subject of this cx-
travagant culogim-a >crubhv. hno;trd. run
ted. gray-hcaded specimen Of ticl! hand,
about four feet and half nigh, who mounted
the box beside him. amid vast roars OF laugh
ter from the crowd.
"lar he is gemmen. 'xamine him an start
him at >ui;in. for he must be sole. Wha.
does Won saw" Several colorcl semmen
mounted the stand and proceeded to" xaminc
him. One violently pulled his mouth open
and reported dis nigger not sound-one Jaw
toof done gone" Another tried TO straishtcn
ont lock OF his wool. with don't Ike dis
h'r kink too much-niSScr lazy" Another
pretended to discover something besides
IDEAS running through his wool. and conclud-
dcd "nisgcr's head too poplar ar'-(populous.)
Another said "niggcr's foot too long an slim
long foot niggcr will steal an run away
long foo, nigscf amt orfjail fees" Another
"nigger's toc-nails too lons-scratch paint
of r my parlor floor. No wants dis nigger
Yah. lly-ah. Yah. Yah. -
well. gcmmcn. is YOU done looking a
dat nisgcr:. Is YOU satisfy He's prime lot
, What do YOU say for dc boy Start him a
sufn; He's got to be sole prumptory sale :.
Ten cent came from the laushin.
crowd. Ten cent-tcn cent. Going at tel
cnt-tcn-tcn-tcn."
"One dime" from the crowd. THANK vo,
sar. One dime. one dime. one dimc-so-i-n
at one dmc-dime. Too bad. gcmmcn
make me sactizc dis artikcl dat way. Sa,
lcben? -
. ..One bit from the crowd. Tank YOU sar
, One bit-onc bit-onc blt-uit-bit-bit-
-soin-won't nobody say lcbcn fo
dis \ l. warranted" &c, "boy' goin' at ont
bit-goin o-i-n-sonc at ten cent. Your
, s;.r. an dog sight more dan he's WORT. !.
-, And he knocked down the property to th'
quasi purchaser with tremendous blow OF
the head with the barrel >tavc he used as
+ hammer" which broke it in the middle. ant
? knocked down the sold party off the bo,
s without his apparently feeling the blow, ),
massive was the conformation of his craniunl
> That Was the greatest auction sale that eve
: We saw-N. q. True Delta.
E ANECpoTE. = An instance Of absence o
mind occurred day or two since. where al
explorer into the mysteries of chemical sci
cnce burnt his nose by fluid lamp witt
g which he came i'll contact. We met him
| day or two afterwards with large plaster up
cn his nose and asked him about his hurt.
1T looks bad. don't it" said he.
We assured him it didn't look anvthin;
Y else. and asked him if it hurt him much Will
\ it was roasting.
Nicer bit" replied he; " in fact, diin'
feel it at all, was SO absorbed III my experi
D ments, and, though l kept smelling some
= thing like burnt meat. imaS Sined it was
: dinner cooking somewhere. and kept righ
, Oh till nv student told me nv nose was o.
fire, and putting my hand up to my olfactc
|, nv, found it even so. thrust it in buck
: ct of water and extinguishcd it, out it has lei
It the mark you see"
L. \ SPIRITED BE!DE-A couple were goin
II to be married, and had proceeded as far a
the church door. The gentleman then STOP
. ped his intended bride, ard thus unexpected
!" ly addressed her: MY dear Eliza, during on
courtship have told much of my mind, bu
' | have not told YOU the whole. When W
! are married shall insist upon three things.
"What are they ," asked the lady. "In tn
first place" said the bridegroom, Il shall e.
: alone, shall sleep alone, and find fault whe;
" there is no occasion. Can YOU submit (
these conditions" 20, Yes sir, very easily
&c was the reply, 'for if YOU sleep alone, sha
IL not; if you eat alone, shall cat first :; and a
C to your finding fault without occasion, that
l. think, may be prevented, for shall take Cal
s. that you shall not want occasion" The COZ
l. ditions being thus adjusted, they proceede
q to the altar, and the ceremony was perform
+ Cd
~ \ young widow who edits paper
b a neighborinG State says: I'VE do not .oo