Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-03-20

morning.
Ny feelings throbbed with pleasure
1t was Lily She had come alane. and
such sound could only come from low
ing, breaking heart.
Oh, Willie dear Willie Ii you
could but speak 10 me-but look at me
E-bat tell me that you died loving, for
giving mei if you could but hear me
now telling how | loved you as can
never love any one else--how from my
very heart have longed for your return.
If only had some one TO talk to but
no one loves me now Dear mamma
even shudders when / come near her.
and papa does not notice me. l must
weep alone. Oh, | am so desolate, SO
lonely and miserable :"
felt the slight pressure of her finger
on the bed. Her deep sobs went to my
heart. longed to clasp her 10 my
breast; but my arms were stiff and cold,
and refused their aid. thought that my
feelings must make my heart beat, but
no; still all was quiet--my hands still
crossed upon my breast. Imust go down
to my grave with my only ungraiifed
wish in my grasp. / had only TO move
to possess il, and / could not. "Oh
Lily !" l said, or rather thought, "why
did you como to torment me with vain
hopes-why withdraw my thoughts from
eternity ?" and / made an effort to be
happy in the prospect Of heaven; but
my thoughts would not soar above the
breaking heart beside me. ] wanted to
comfort her-to tell her to leave me, to
pray for consolation-to tell her how, in
my hour of darkness, l had found ligh;
how, in my writhing agony, / lad
found rest in my Savior, but | could not
At last the door opened, and l felt the
light from a candle. 1t was my moth
er's voice heard saying" You here,
my child 2 and knew that her arm was
around the mourner. / heard from
Lily's bursting heart the exclamation
" Oh, had he but loved me !" / heard
them talk together Of me. heard my
mother tell Of my long devotion to her.
soft soily f6en | ny a;i noier poiaied t hsf sff Is
the light beyond this darkness-the dark
cloud brightly edged. She told of her
own agony in the morning, and how, in
the stiffness Of her closet she had been
wondrously comforted-how she had
been assured that the child of so many
prayers could not be lost-she was COM
forted by the unchanging God. Every
now and then she would hush the quick
sobs, as if she were dealing with little
child.
"There now, my own child, my little
Lily, don't cry any more. We must not
murmur at our Fathers chastisement.-
He had to take our idol, in order to draw
our rebellious hearts TO himself" Not
one word Of reproach was uttered-noth-
ing which could wound and presently
the sobs ceased, and gently putting her
arms around her, my mother led her from
the room.
Then came the servants bringing can
dles-the watchers, who we're old con-
panions of my own and between their
visits and my own reflections the long
night passed unhappily.
My funeral was to take place the next
day. ] took the most intense interest in
all that concerned II. ] knew the time
was drawing near. / heard them SET
something down upon the bed--it was
my coffin ! felt myself lifted and laid in
lit. ] remember that my arms bad to be
pressed close In order that j might lie
within its narrow limits. ] remember
the painfully eramped feeling this gave
me. ] was then carried into the pariors.
| heard the thick, deep sobs through tbe
two rooms. heard the trenuious hymn
sometimes ceasing from emotion, and
then taken up again. heard the sol
emn voice of the minister say:
i Man that Is born Of woman Is Of few
days and full Of trouble" / heard MS
own funeral sermon, and the solemn, el
oquent supplieafion to the Throne o
Grace for the bereased and the words
q The services win be concluded at fh'
grave / felt the sheet lifted from my
4 face, and knew that there we're many loY
n ing eyes fixed upon Ene--more than on
: kindly tear fell upon nay face. inaa'
a desperate effort 10 open my eyes, and
, reader,-I sueceededi have an 10
! distinct recollection Of shriei.s, aHd ihs
rningling Of many voices, and ] sank int
I a slate Of inseBaibiiiiy.
When / awosse, ] was ia my owr
room, and she pale, anxi0us faces of ms