The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1857-05-06

SO we parted; | with sorrow
She with scorn, perhaps, with nate
And nv heart grows sad by knowing
What l lost by kissing Aafe.
THE DANGERS OF FLIRTING-The cores
nondent at New York Of the Charleston Even
ing News tells this amusing. story OF an aflail
that came off few days ago, in front OF one
Of the uptown hotels in New York:
A young lady, very pretty, very VAN, very
silly and very coquetish. mes IN an OMNIBUS
vonno man, very well dressed, very spooney
and very much inclined to think no small beer
of himself The young man looked at the
Young lady, and the young lady looked at the
young man, the young man smiled ana 'he
lady smiled in return. The young man oo-
served to the young lady lhatit was fine day;
and the young lady doubtless struck BY the
originality of the observation assented TO the
truth of the proposition. The young lady got
out of the omnibus-tbe young gentleman got
out too, and followed the Young lady to her
hotel, when they exchanged cards and parted.
The next day the young man passed by the
window of the hotel, and kissed his hand to
the young lady; the young lady returned the
salute: the young man wrote some silly nom
sence on card and sent it to the young lady.
But the young lady's brother being In the
room when the card was presented, had the I'M
pudence to read it, and then had the further
audacity to inquire what it meant.
The young lady told the "joke"-the broth
er thought it no joke, rushed out, while the
young lady rushed to the window and sigma
Used for the yonng man to 60 away. The
Young man mistook the signal and kept on
kissing his hand, and otherwise making fool
of himself, till he finally crossed the street and
was in the act of going into the hotel, when
the indignant brother rushed out. The young
man fed, the indignant brother pursued, both
coat tails futtered in the breeze for while, but
at last the indignant brother caught the fool
ish young man and applied cowhide over his
ewes and face Clench tussel, roll in the mud,
interchange Of blows. The young man gotup
peepers closed, coat torn, covered with mud,
the indignant brother, flushed and furious, some
slight scratches on his face, coat soiled, pants
airy but otherwise in pretty good condition.
The indignant brother inquired whether the
silly young man wanted amy more" The
Young man said he didn't. Exit the indignant
brother into the hotel. The silly young man
went away in carriage to repair damages
Little boys hurraed, and the crowd laughed.
The following certificate speaks for itself 1T
is going the rounds, and we should like to hear
it 'slocated," in order to advise the owner to
take out ''patent:"
"DEAR DoCToR:-I will be one hundred and
seventy-fve years old next October. For nine
ty-four years have been an invalid, unable to
move, except when stirred with lever; but a
year ago last Thursday, heard of the Grant
cular syrup. bought bottle, smet Of the
cork, and found myself new man. can now
run twelve and half miles an hour, and throw
nineteen double somersets without stopping.
PISA little of your Alicumstoutum salve
applied to wooden leg, reduced compound
fracture in fifteen minutes and is now covering
the limb with a fresh cuticle Of white gum pine
bark.
A "Green Mountain Boy" tells the follow
ing spicy anecdote, which, he says, is anthem
tic, and which We 60 not remember to have pre-
viously seen in print:
Roswell F., Vermont lawyer Of distin-
guished ability, now residing in st. Louis, and
in the first rank of the bar of Missouri, had
brought suit in court which was really so
plain case for the plaintiff that having sub
iAitICu pdpCIS anu UtilCi picOio COuIt
he felt that his clients interest really required
no more, and he accordingly sat down without
making the customary opening address to the
jury. But the defendants counsel, more am
bilious of rhetorical display, and probably con-
scious that the defence required the best abili-
ties, rose and made long harange, character
ised by an immense food of pompous words,
las was his CUSTOM but destitute of even an
attempt at logic or reasoning of any kind
When he had done, the plaintiff = counsel, who
was expected to make an elaborate speech in
reply, rose and merely said: MAY it please
the court and gentlemen of the jury-in this
case shall follow the example Of The counsel
for the defence, and submit the case without
argument"
Public opinion" says writer, sis modes
ty personifed. 1t never speaks frst| but waits
tc behold the success or failure of its votary.
If successful she loads him with homer and
applause; if unfortunate, she clothes him with
contempt. In fact, she Judges only of merit
by success or failure" That's sure, sarcastic
enough, but it is too true nevertheless. Where
would Washington have been if h. had not
succeeded? 1t is refreshing to lobk the truth
full in the face now and then
bob, Harry Smith has one of |he greatest
curiosities you ever saw !
Don't say so-what is it?''
ga tree which never sprouts, and which be-
comes smaller the older it grows"
well, that is curiosity. Where did he
get it?'
From California"
"What is the name of it?''
k,ta Ia L
MIA omnibus
Scene closes by Bob throwing an|ina stand
at a half closed door.
Madam" said doctor one day to The
mother of a sweet healthy babe, "the ladies
have deputied me to inquire what You do to
have such a happy, uniform good child" The
mother unused for moment over the strange
ness of the question, and then she replied, sim
ply and beautifully:-"Why, God has given
ME healthy child, and let it alone