Southern sentinel. [volume] (Plaquemine, Parish of Iberville [La.]) 1848-1858, 1857-07-04
A Patent Sermon.

The following is said to be going the
rounds of the English press, as verita-
bic specimen of pulpit oratory in the back
woods Of America. Credulity is going
farther than the sermon:
Beloved Brethren: I'm the man what
preached the sermon which has been
printed in the papers, from the tex, 'And
he played on harp Nv a thousand strings
-sperits of just men made perfeck.' |
mout as well say don't take pride in
things NV that sort, for in the language Nv
my tex for &u day-Tm an orful sinner,
the chief among ten thousands, and the
one aItcrgether luvly. Them is the words
which you'll find in Genesee. I'm gwine
to preach without notes, 'kase can't rite,
and 'kase ] couldn't read it eff could;
nv notes are bark notes, of which I've
got a pocket full, and notes of hand,
which ] shall g i've to my squire to collect
when get back to Indiana, for-I'm an
orfuI sinner, the chief among ten thou
sand; and the one aitergether luvly.
This tex, my brethren, can be dividen
into three peices-fust, second and third.
Fust, 1 am an orful sinner. That means
you inderwidually, not me pursonalIy.-
Thar are more sinners nor one. It's
sin tu drink water and catch the ague,
whar little sperits will keep you in good
health; its sin to steal, unless you 'steal
awhile away its a sin to swear, unless
YOU swear and sin not; its a sin to lie, un-
less you lie low and keep dark; pride is
sin. Some is proud of their bookS-now
amt, though I've the gift and grit to
speak in publick; some is proud of their
Iearnin, but thank God I've none to be
proud uv-for I'm an orful sinner, the
chief among ten thousand, and the one
aItergether IuvIy.
Second, 'Chief among ten thousand. =
Thar is different kinds Of chiefs. Thar's
the mischief, the chief of sinners and the
Cavuga Chief. The mischief means the
old Boy, what keeps the fire Office below,
and lets poor folks suffer in the cold here
on airth. The chiefs of sinners means
you, you wharf rats, and arterdemelons
amflebus animals, what live here about
the canawI. Look at them ere hosses
rise up in judgement agin you, high Nv
bone, low uv flesh, tutf hides and short
memories; hear the crows cawing fur they
know that whar the canawl is thar will
the crowd be gathering. The Cayuga
chief is teller what pitches into my frens
the sperit-dealers, and in other frens the
State Prison officers. He is one NV your
cold watur men who goes far the prohibi-
tory law what Governor Seymour vetoed.
fit warnt Sunday should hooray for
Seymour-for I'm an orful sinner, the
chief among ten thousand and the one al.
tergether luvIy.
Thirdly, sAitergether luvIy.' Different
things is luvly. When my boat swims
like duck, say she am uvly-when
my wife gives me no curtain lectures,
(she has the gift of tongues as well as my
self, say she am Iuyly-when the wind
don't blow aud it don't rain, and it don't
do nothing, / say the day am luvly, for
Tn the chief among ten thousand, and
the one aItergether Iuvly.
In conclusion, brethering, if that big
pile of stuns was one stun what big stun
it would be, eff you my brethering were
one bruther what big bruther you'd be,
and ifmy big bruther should fling that
big stun into the canawl, what a great
splash that would make---for I'm an or%
ful sinner, the chief among ten thousand
and the one altergether Iuvly.
My brethering, | want to give notice
there will be some carrying on at this
place next Sunday afternoon at half pas
four, when shall prove the doctrin that
Nv all the sheIIsein the world, the hard
shells am the thickest and the best-fur
I'm an orful sinner, the chief among ten
thousand, and the one altergether luvly.
I shall prove that book larnin amt Of
no use my breethering, that writing Ger.
mons and getting celery for um is sin
that deserves Observation-Disclosures I'm an
orful sinner, the chief famong ten thousand.
and the one altergether luyly.
Breethering Ietus liquor, and then 60
hum, remember the words Of the profit,
BE sure you're right, then 60 ahead
REsuscIrATIoN.-Dr. Marshall Hall,
tho a1,inaot l.ondon nhysician. giVes in