davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
the CARNIVAL OF ADjFcTlvEs.

Foremost among the freaks OF language is
the caperng Of adjectives. They skip and
bound and surge and roar in such various
ways, and with such grotesque effect, as 10
keep up constant carnival. Not uufeduenl-
ly they are made to confound qualities, ap.
pearances and senses, as in The case Of tho
old lady who said that she loved oysters be-
cause they left IA pretty Taste in her mouth"
and who insisted moreover that she hated
Gan ugly smell" and was very fond OF
"handsome music.n Sometimes those which
properly relate TO size or form are applied
anonymously 10 mental efforts, such as "a
tall speech" ,""a big sermon,"a fat thought"
"a huge argument" Al other times they
are tumbled together with signifca,ions SO
nearly synonymous as 10 render language
vapid, of which these are specimens. .He
is acontened, satisfied and happy man, ""a
talkalive. voluble and loquacious fellow"
ga pleasant and agreeable companion,"
brutal ard savage monster" Very often the
finest adjecives in the yerpacuiaF, tdilick
about with sad company: "a magnificent
pig,n "a superb shad, !" ga splendid cat" and
the like, are examples Of the free compan-
io6ship. On the other hand those which are
bes, suited 10 ordinary purposes are often
found in The company Of extraordinary things,
affording literal but not philosophical full
filmeni of the rule, that "adjecuves belong
to the nouns which they desctibe." This
thought is suggested by the remark Of the
Cockney, on viewing the Falls Of Niagara
"decIdedly, may say very pretty" and by
the observation of the Yankse--"a large
water power, reckon.n What man of feel
ing is there who could have stood by and
listened TO such nonsense, without 6eing i'm
PEELED TO thrash the sirnpleious who uttered
h7 But il must be remembered that the
harlequins in this carnival enjoy perfect
freedom from restraint, and talk and act just
as they please, and we must therefore for
give the Cockney and the Yankee, as we'll
as numberless other offenders whose jollty
would be disturbed by harsh treatment. So
long as the world goes on 40 il does, the
sport will be continued and enjoyed by
certain sort Of people. Yet, in the mean
time, we would suggest that "Adisctiviana"
is new theme, and one which may some
day be done up with embslishmenls in
public lecture with amazing effecl.--Penn-
syluanian.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
royal ANEcDorE.

AS Joseph H., Emperor of Austria, was
driving his one-horse cabriolet, dressed in the
garb of private citizen, he was accosied
by u soldier, who mistaking him for man
of the middle class, requested seat in the
vehicle.
"Willinsly," replied the Emperor; ''jump
in, comrade, for Pm in hurry"
The soldier was soon seated alongside oil
the Emperor, and became very loquacious.
"Come comrade," said he, sIapp,ng the
good at guessingl"
"Pehaps I am, u said Joseph, "ny me-"
"Well, theG, my boy, coniure up .youI
wits, and tell me what had FOR breakfast"
''Sour krout p'
"Come, none Of that, comrade, try il
again"
"Perhaps Wesiphalia ham," replied the
Emperor, willing TO humor his companion.
"Beter Than that" exclaimed the soldier
"Sausaees from Bologna, and Hockheimer
from the Rhine"
"Betler than lllat-d'yo give it upp
"I do.n
"Open your eyes and ears, them" said The
soldier, blunlly. 81 had pheasant, by Jove,
shot in the Emperor Joe's park. ha, ha!'
When the exulalion of the soldier had
subsidized, Joseph said quietly:
n want 10 Try your skill in guessing, COM
rade. See il you can name The rank hold"
"You'r a-no-bans II! you're not smart
enough for cornet."
Better than ,ha,, p saidahe Emperor.
"a lieutenant?"
"Better than that"
ga captain 2"
"Better than that"
ga MAJOR"
"Belter than that"
"A general!n
"Getter than that"
The soldier was now fearfully agitaed; he
had ,dofTed his hat, and sat bare.headed; he
could scarcely aniculate.
"Pardop me, your excellency, you are field
marshal :"
"Belter Than that, /" replied Joseph.
"Lord help me- cried The soldier, "you'fs
the Emperor %
He threw himself out OF the cabriolei, and
knclt for pardon in the mud. The circum-
stances were not forgotten by either; the En-
peror often laughed over ii, and the soldie,
received mark of favor which he could
not forget.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15

TO rest bimseIf whenever Two OF three men
meet upon the foot pavement and begin 10
! talk: he is lisieniag 10 what they say.'--
Another was also very Ingenious. This was
an elderly looking invalid, closely wrapped
up, attended by livery servant, and who
| had ensconced himself IN The very middle OF
groupof silters of both sexes, whom the
first rays Of this premature Sunshine had se
| duced 10 what are usually The banuts OF a
month later Others again [and great many)
| were dressed as workmen--some IN blouses,
| some in working jackets several wese atlir
ed in "shabby gehieel' costume, looking
like poor professors, Or employees Wills,
some were as elegantly dressed, anG appear.
ed as gentlemanike as The generality Of dAu-
GERS in Paris bathrooms.
"The place where you may see the most
of these gentry" said M, ''is--if you
will come as far as the round point of the
Champs Elysees--the fountain. II is their
gathering place; they know that, in the course
of the day, they can always be sure 10 find
each other there" Sure enough, when we
reached the founlain we found d small circle
OF these police heroes; and as we approach.
ed, our informal designated them TO us.
"You see the seedy looking man with
burdle of papers under his arm, The joumey-
man painter iolng against the edge OF ba
sin, The dandy examining the play of the
water through his eye glass, and that iall,
raw, ragged youth trying 10 make a bi, of
boat sail along. Well, know every man Of
iham- They arc all moiiehardsl (poiice spies }
As.we passed quite close 10 these indivdu.
| ais, we noticed that our cotnparion was evi.
IDENTITY known TO them; but, as he himself
remarked, t'tbey did not venture 10 bowl 10
him. Further on, however, close TO The Fri.
umphal Arch, we met an elderly man dressed
extremely well, and carrying "respeciabiliiy"
in every feature. "To this one, il you Iike,"
said M, 81 will speak," and he accord
insly accosled him thus:
swell, SO and SO, then you carry on your
trade still? | should have thought Il was
pretty nearly time 10 retire from business"
"Ah! Monsieur le Perfect" was the au.
swer Of the mar, who could not make up hia
mind 10 treat as an ordinary mortal him who
had once been his immediate superior, ".i
really cannot consent to give up my young
men and The fair ladies; they interest mel
have The habit of lhem!" sr
This needs explanation. The man in ques-
zion is especially charged TO watch over a
certain class of ladies in their relationship
with young men Of family; his observations
all went to prove ,aa,, never, In any time had
The youth of France been SC immoral, 20 de-
graded but he always ended by saying he
could not give them up yel, because he had
"lhe habit of them"
confess that this little out.of door insight
into The "manners and customs" of the Par
isian police amused me much and have
thought that, sketched as 1t is from ethe lfe,"
il might not be without interest to your read
ers.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
THE WIFE.

She who sleeps upon my heart
Was The first to win il;
She who dreams upon my breast
Ever reigns within il.
She who kisses of my lips,
Wakes their wArmesl blessing;
She wbores,s within my arms
Feels their closest pressing.
Other days than these shall come,
Days that may be dfesry--
0iher hours shall greet US yet,
Hours that may be weary; ssz
Sill this heart shall be thy throne,
Still this breast shall be thy pillow;
Still these hps shall meet thine of
AS billow meeleth billow
Sleep, then, on my happy heart,
Since thy love hath won it,
Drea n, then, ON ihy loyal bressi,
None but thou has doue il;
And when age our bloom shu u change,
With its winlry weather,
May we in the self-same grave
Sleep and dream together.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
From Lieut.. Ha,bcrsham's " My Last Cruise.
LIFE IN JAVA.

We have made the acquaintance OF Mr.
l.. NJ. Squires, an American resident Of eley.
en- years, and who Subsequently joined the
Hancock in the capacity of assistant natural
list. We were smoking our cherooIs in The
porch Of the Amsterdam Hotel.
"While we were thus smoking'in the cool
evening breeze, we were joined by several
gentlemen, acquaintances of Mr.. Sqnires,
and who were presented TO us. The usual
comments upon The state OF the weather
were got of with happy success, and Then
every one began TO wait for his neighbor 10
say something else. Finally, one of the
new arrivals, an Englishman, asked me alb
Iup,ly, If had ever seen native under the
influence OF The muck
"The what ?'' asked. %
"Tbe muck! The running muck.y
''I replied in the negative, adding that |
had never before heard The expression.
"IIe expressed great surprise a, this, and
proceeded 10 tell US that the running muck
was ofIen productive Of many deaths.
'gIhougbt this rather singular piece Of
'n'o'ma'iop 70 come py hsel' ou. con'eh'eu &c,
inyse'i WIN ooss'sins, iou oons say 90
ihe Ehs'snmao cleared ms 'n'oa'' swsi-
ied very large, cahed ior = glass Oh 'ail'ano-
'arl, and continued as 'oliows:
some lev oil 'ne nauses mere consume
Quantities oi OPIUM IN various lofms; ahd
the result IS 'iia'' ~ que co'rse o. ''me, 'hier
features become shafp' 'ne SKIN isdrawn
over "iem IKE parcfment' ana losing ihe"
MINDS, they become more iefoc'ous and
oloodlh'fs'y 'han l'sers themselves. Armed
WIN the long and hex'ble kreiss "a eharp
dns kn'ie' whose eages are wavy and oil a
peao''iu' 'emper,) 'ney rush iransical'y ifom
the.f houses-and run as swiftly as their
limbs WIN carry 'nsm--somet'mes naked
sometimes clo'heo, always mad; Rushing
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
TO ihe care of strangers, how necessary that
they be lie 4 early and safely 70 Christ.

TO The care OF strangers, how necessary that
they be lie early and safely to Christ.
! view o. this subject. ! would ask hue
bands here, 10 appreciate those who make
the Joy Of their dwellings, Are not the kind
ness OF wives oileu unnoied, nnlbanked, un-
regarded? Remember, that these compan-
ions Of your existence fill offices Of dignity
and high usefulness. They are shut out
from the worlds applause; let them rest in
the assurance OF your gratitude and consid-
Grafton. When You see Them still end cold
in death, it will moi grieve you to remember
that your love has thrown sunshine into the
shade Of their allotment, that your prayers
and example have given them aid in the
right training Of your children.
Ia view Of this subject we see how much
necessity exists for personal and family re-.
ligion. Wives are Torn from their husbands,
mothers are separated ftom their darling chill,
dreu. The wand of death leaves the most
cheerful family circle cold aud desolale.
There is but ono relief. The pious dead
are not lost, and in our deepest sorrows we
an allowed 10 look up and say
"Thcre is world above,
Where parting is unknown;
A long eternity of love,
Formed for the good alone,
And faith beholds the dying mere
Translated 10 that heavenly sphere"
Al the grave of the good, we may well
adopt the language of the Apostles: "Lord,
TO whom shall we go, for thou alone hast
the words of eternal lile?" Life here is a
shadow-Heaven is fixed and immutable
reality; and BLESSED are the dead that have
died in the Lord, for they rest from ihair To-
bors, and tireir works do follow them"
In respect TO her whom we all mourn,
we may say
"Now take thy rest in thy shadowy hall,
In thy mournful shroud reposiug;
There is no blight on thy soul TO fall,
No mist on its light is closing
1t will shine in glory when time is DER,
When each phanlom ofearth shall wilher,
When the friends that deplore thee sigh no
more,
But lie down in the dust together.
Though sad winds wall in the cypress bough,
Thou art resting calm and untroubled now"
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15
Gboite poetrn.



Talk not TO us about our hoops
Or OF our skifls, nor what OF loops,
Well wear just what we please, :
For every body now doth need
Protection from the woolly breed,
If she regards her ease.
Was ever earth more crushed with trash
Than you who grow the vile muslache,
And, with sparing hand,
Deal out 10 us in endless rhyme
That wearing 'hoops" is all crime?
But this we understand.
There's some of you look quite feline,
While Others look somewhat canine,
And some seem both combined;
Just as il seems 10 suit The iasle
of would be MEN in hottest hasle,
II they but had mind.
Then, too, in ibis progressive age,
A woolly lace is all the rage,
A human head TO mack;
Which makes one look SO very prim,
like every other woolly-Jim,
But here inst lei me ask,
Is there hole about your head
lu which TO put your daily bread F.?
If SO, where is the place?
For, Declare, no one can see
Where such spot can fairly be,
About your woolly face.
And if sou have II ic use,
And filed with vile tobacco juice,
All ready for sqni:t
Upon some lady's fancy dress,
Or in The face of loyliness--
Whal donh fall on your shir:.
To smoke, and chew, and raise crop
OF fag-enh wool and act The Top,
Wuh time and money spent,
Just fills you cup OF usefulness,
While. TOO, you are to fillhiness
A walking monument.
And as you, yvslk The streets Hbout,
Like some great awkward, lazy lout,
With long nine 10 puff.
You think yourself most wondrous wise,
Aud like The toad quite large in size
But hold, I've sad enough.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15

AZ tits truth not unworthy of consider
alton, that those who obstinately refuse to
giveup abuses, viii inevitably be called up
on 10 surrender uses. f<s rs.ls,
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1857-07-15

Ey The corner stone of the National Clay
Monument at Lexington, Ky, was laid on
the 9th inst, with imposing ceremonies.
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09
rrrom DR.. kane,s ..Arctic Explorations.

sA-N -O%DN@
1t blew perfect hurricane. We had
seen it coming, and were ready with
three good hawsers out ahead, and all
things snug on board.
Still it came on heavier and heavier,
and the ice began to drive more wildly
than thought l had ever seen it. l
had just turned in to warm and dry NY
self during the momentary lull, and was
stretching myself out in my bunk, when
| heard the sharp twanging snap of a
cord. Our six inch hawser had parted,
and we were swinging by the two others;
the gale like roaring lion to the south
ward.
Half a minute more, ''twang, twang !"
came a second report | knew it was
the whale line by the shrillness of the
ring. Our noble ten-inch MANILA still
held on. / was hurrying my last sock
into its seal-skin boot, when McGary
came waddling down the companion
ladders: Captain Kane, she won't hold
much longer; it's blowing the devil him
self, and I'm afraid to surge"
The MANILA cable was proving its ex-
cellence when | reached the deck; and
the crew, as they gathered round me,
were loud in its praises. We could hear
its deep Eolian chant swelling through
all the rattle of the running-gear and
moaning of the shrouds. Il vas tie
death songi The strand gave way with
the noise of shotted gum and in the
smoke that followed their recoiI, we
were dragged out by the wild ice, at its
mercy.
We steadied and did some pretty
warping, and got the brig good bed in
the rushing drift but it all came to no.
thing. We then tried to beat back
through the narrow ice-clogged water
way, that was driving, a quarter of a
mile wide, between the shore and the
pack. 1t cost us two hours of hard Ia
Dor, / thought skilfully bestowed but
at the end Of that time, we were at least
four miles off, opposite the great valley
in the centre of Bedevilled reach
Ahead of us, farther to the north, we
could see the strait growing still mar
rover, and the heavy ice-tables grinding
up, and clogging it between the shole
cliffs on one side and the ledge on the
other. There was but one thing left for
us-to keep in some sort the command
of the helm by going freely where we
must otherwise be driven. We allowed
her to scad under reefed foretopsail !;
all hands watching the enemy, as we
closed, in silence. At in the morning.
we were close upon the piling masses
We dropped our heaviest anchor with
the desperate hope of winding the brig,
but there was no withstanding the ice
torrent that followed us. We had only
time to fasten spar as buoy to the
chain, and let her slip. So went our best
bower
Down we went upon the gale again,
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09
WHOLE NUMBER 347.


hopelessly scraping along lea of ife
seldom less than thirty feet thick; one
foe measured by line as we tried TO
fasten to it, more than forty. l had
seen such ice only once before, and
never in such rapid motion. One up
turned mass rose above our gunwale,
smashing in our bulwalks, and deposit
ing balf ton of ice in a lump upon ofr
decks. Our staunch little brig bore her
self through all this wild adventure as if
she had charmed life.
But new enemy came in sight ahead.
Directly in our way, just beyond tile
line of hoe-ice, against which we wefe
alternately sliding and humping, wasa
group of bergs. We had no power to
avoid them, and the only question was,
whether we were to be dashed to pieces
against them, or whether they might n3t
offer us some providential nook of
refuge from the storm. But as we
neared them, we perceived that they
were at some distance from the foe
edge, and separated from it by an inter
val of open water Our hopes rose as
the gale drove US toward the passage
and into it, and we were ready to exult
when, from some unes planned eaase,
probably an eddy of the wind against
the lofty ice-walls, we lost our headway
Almost at the same moment we saw that
the bergs were not at rest that with a
momentum of their own they were bear
ing dcwn upon the other ice, and that it
must be our fate to be crushed between
the two.
Just then a broad sconce-piece Of low
water-washed berg came driving from
the southwark The thought flashed
upon me of one of our escapes in Mel
vile Bay, and as the sconce moved
rapidly close alongside us, McGary
managed to plant an anchor on its slope,
and to hold on to it by whale-line. 1t
was an anxious moment. Our noble tow
horse, whittier than the pale horse that
seemed to be pursuing us, hauled us
bravely on; the spray dashed over his
windYard fanks, and his forehead
plowing up the lesser ice as if in scorn.
The bergs encroached upon us as we
advanced; our channel narrowed to a
width of about forty feet; we braced
the yards to keep clear Of the impend-
ing ice-walls.
We passed clear; but it was a close
shave, 50 close that our port-quarter boat
would have been crushed if we had not
taken it from the davits. and found our
selves under the lee of the berg, in con
paratively open lead. Never did heart
tried men acknowledge, with more graft
tude, their merciful deliyerance from a
wretched death.
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09

~" 1t is no uncommon thing forladies
to become slatternly after marriage
They neglect dress except when going
abroad, and then perhaps there is a
great display of finery, and bad taste in
over-dressing. Much respect is shown
to company" but apart from this there
is a sort of hat's-the-use?" abaadon-
ment; and the compliments which are
paid to strangers is withheld from those
who are the most likely to appreciate it,
and who have the best right to claim it.
"When a woman, with reference to
the question of personal adornment be-
gins to say to herself "It is only my
husband" she must prepare herself f3r
consequences which she may perhaps
regret to the latest day of her life"
Fair reader, this is from lady writdr
of wide reputation : one of your ow n
sex so, without wishing that there was
society for the suppression of advice
among the other voices of the day, think
whether this advice be not good, and
when found to be so, lay it to heart
Harper's Magazine.
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09

CuRRAN's HUMoR.-The humor of
John Philpot Curran, the famous Irish
orator, was often broad and farcical.-
On one occasion he arrested the atten-
ton of the bench by the following state
ment: "On my way to Court, my lord,
as | passed by one of the markets, | OBJ
served butcher preparing to slaughter
calf Just as his hand was raised,
lovely little child approached him un-
perceived, and, terrible to relate, e still
see the life-blood gushing out,) the poor
child's bosom was under his hand, when
he plunged the knife into {" Into
the bosom of the child 2" exclaimed the
Judge in tone Of deep horror. Into
the neck of the calf, my lord, but yoNs
lordship sometimes anticipates WhsA
vindicating his countrymen from the
charge of being naturally vicious, he
said that he had never yet heard OF an
Irishman being born drunk. In his lash
illness, his physician observed in tha
morning that he appeared to cough with
more difficulty, he answered-"That is
rather Surprising, as l have been prac
ticing all night" In commenting on
decision of Judge Robinson, he said, II
have never met with the law as laid
down by your lordship in any book in
my library Ihe Judge replied that
he suspected Curranss library was very
small Robinson had written some
anonymous pamphlets, which gave his
antagonist the opportunity to rejoin.--
My library may be small, but | thank
heaven that among my books there are
none of the pamphleteers of the day. /
find it l-ore instructive, my lord, to
study good works than to compose bad
ones. My books may be few, but the
title pages give the writer's names--my
shelf is not disgraced by any sush rapk
absurdity that their authors are ashamed
to own them"
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09

AN INPATIENT JURYMAN.-An Ar
kansas correspondent of the New Or
leans Picdyune gives the following as
authentic
You are all fond of cracking jokes at
the expense of Arkansas; now, here is
one on your state, absolutely true. /
got it from an eyewitness
The district court in one of your nor
thern parishes was in session-'twas the
first day of court; time, after dinner.
Lawyers and others had dined, and were
sitting out before the hotel, and long,
lank, unsophisticated countryman came
up and unceremoniously made himself
one of EN-, and remarked: Gentlemen.
| wish you would go on with this court.
for | want to go home-I left Betsy
looking OUT
"Ah!' said one of the lawyers, "and
pray, sir, what detains you at court 2"
Why, SIR said the countryman.
I'm fotch here as jury, and they say
if | go home they will have to find me,
and they moutn't do that as | live
good piece"
What jury are You on? 2" asked
lawyer.
What jury"
Yes, what jury! Grand or traverse
jury? 2"
aGrand or travis jury dad-fetehed if
[ know"
Well" said the lawyer, did the
judge charge you?'
Well, SQUIRE" said he, "the little
fellow that sits up in the pulpit, and
kinder bosses it over the crowd. gin us
a talk, but don't know whether he
charged any thing or not
The crowd broke up in roar Of laugh
ter, and the sheriff called court.
The Nevada journal., 1857-01-09

A SERIOUS JoKE.-A wealthy gentle
man in Boston whose benevolence is
rather in excess of his discretion, has
ordered of the American Rible Society
a number of imperial quarto bibles,
bound in Turkey morocco, with panel
covers, each to be enclosed in a rose
wood case. and presented to each of the
crowned heads Of the world The books
will cost about $50 copy.
The crowned heads will be rather
puzzled to know what the gift means;
the Catholic crowned heads, such as
King Bomba. for instance, will either
throw them into the fire, or send the
messengers who deliver them to the In
quisition. Since Lord Timothy Dexter
made a shipment of warming pans to the
West Indies, no New Englander has un-
dertaken SO novel speculation.
n Y. Times.