Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1857-06-26

johnson along an azed for breakfus-I
wish it had pizened him, durn his hide,
an | wonder it didn't, fur she cooks aw-
full mixens when she trys. I'm pizcn
proof, myself, (holding up his flask and
peeping through it, ur I'd been long
ago.
Well, while he wur a eatin' she
spied out that his shut was stiff an nifty
slick; so she never rested till she wormed
it outen HIM that a preparation owe -four
did it, an she got few perticulers about
the proceedings too, outen him by 'oman's
art don't know how she did it, per-
haps he does. AFTER he left, she sot in
an billed big pot ov paste, high on to a
peck ov it, an souzed in my shut an let
it soak awhile; then she tuck it an
ironed it out fat an dry, an sot itup on
its aidge agin the cabin in the sun -
Thar it stood as stiff as dry boss hide,
an it ratified like sheet owe iron, it did.
1t wur pasted tugether all over. When
| cum tn dinner, nuthin wud du but |
must put it on. Well, Belts an me got
the thing open arter sum hard work, she
pullin' at one owe the tails an me at
luther, an / got into it. Durn the ev-
erlastin' new tangled shut, say. felt
like I'd crawled inter an old bee gum an
fit full Of pisants but it wur like Law
yer Johnson's, an | stud it like man,
an went tn work tu build Belts an ash
hopper. / worked powerful hard an
SWEET like boss, an when the shut got
wet it quit its hurtin' AFTER / got dun
tuck about four fingers owe red head,
an crawled up into the cabin loft to take
snuse.
"Well, when I walked up / thot |
was ded, or had the cholery, for all the
jints | cud muve were my ankles, wrists,
and knees-cudn't even muve my head
an scarcely wink my eyes-the cussed
shut wur pasted fast onto me all over,
from the pint ov the tails tn the pint ov
the broad-ax collars over my years. 1t
sot me clost as poor COW dus hide in
March | squirmed an strained till
got it sorter broke at the shoulders and
elbows, an then dun the durndest fool
thing ever did in these mountains !
shufled my britches off an tore loose
from my hide about two inches of the
tail all round in much pain and tribula-
ton. Oh but it did hurt. Then !
TUX up plank outen the loft and hung
my legs down thru the hole and nailed
the aidge of the frunt tail to the aidge
vi f the aoor before, AN Inc hind tail !
nailed to the plank what l set on / on
buttoned the collar and ristband, raised
my hands way up abuv my he'd, shut up
my eyes, said grace, an jumpt thru to
the groun floor.
Here Sut ruminated sadly.
George, I'm a durnder fool than
ever dad was, Hoss, Hornets and all L.
I'll drownd myself sum oy these days,
see eff don't.
"Well, go on, Sut, did this shirt come
OFF,"
"I-t-h-i-n-k-i-t-d-i-d. I
hearn noise sorter like tarin single
ruff off ov house, all at onst, an felt
like my CUTS an bones wur all that reach
ed the floor. / staggered tn my feet an
TUX look at the shut. The nails had
all hilt thar holt, and thar it wur hangin
arms down, inside out, an as stiff as ev-
or. 1t looked ike a map ov Mexico
jist arter one ov the wurst- battles-a
patch of my hide about the size owe a
dollar an half bill here, bunch of my
har about the size .ov birds nest thar
then sum more skin, then sum paste,
then little more har, then heap owe
Exit, fn5H TH5TIG uGf,' T1icn sEf, ali SO OH
all over that burned new-fanglcd, ever
lastin' Internal cuss ov shut. 1t wur
a picture to look at 20 wur l. The
hide, har, an paste wur about ekeally
divided atween me an hit Wonder
what Belts, durn her, ihot when she
cum hum an foun' me missin' Spccks
she thinks / crawled intu the thicket an
died owe my wounds. 1t must av skared
her good, fur ] tell you it looked like
the skin of sum wild beast torn off alive,
or bag what had kcrried load of fresh
beef from shootin' match.
i" Now, George, eff ever ketch that
Lawyer Johnston out I'll shoot him, an
eff ever any oman talks about fat'nin'
shut fur me agin, durn my everlastin'
pictur' Of don't fatten her. It's rit-
ribution sartin, the biggest kind owe
preachers regular rit-ribution. Du you
mind my drivin' ov dad thru that hor-
nets nest, an then racin' owe him inter
the kreck?"
eyes"
4 "Well, this is what comes ov it. I'll
drownd myself sum owe these days, see
eff / don't, eff don't die from that art
full shut. Take horn, and don't you
ever try sticky shut as long as you
live. "-NashyiHe Union and american.
4 A Runaway RIVER -The Nebraskian
Of the LIST instant describes aagrant
outrage upon "squatter sovereignty" as
having been lately perpetratcd by the
the Missouri river, in the vicinity Of De
4 Soto.. Washington county, in that Terri
tory. The ice gorged in the bend of the
river few miles above that town, and
the water, with criminal disregard Of
the rights Of De Soto aud her ferry
privileges, took a short cut across the
bend, forcing q channe. near Calhoun,
Iowa, and making De Soto an inland
town Of Nebraska, some four or five
miles from the river, to the infinite dis
gust Of the inhabitants of that city. By
this arrangement few Thousand acres Of
land will be added TO the already extern
] afva Ion,o,oa IS Not~ocf-o