M'arthur Democrat. (McArthur, Vinton County, Ohio) 1853-1865, 1857-12-03
HARP SERMON.

an unlarnt preacher, OF whom you've
no doubt hearn before, and now APP
pear to expound the Scriptures, and
pint out the narrow way which leads
from vain world to the streets Of
Jerusalem; and my text which shall
choose for the occasion is in the leds
Of the Bible somewhere between the
second Chroni kills and the last chap
ter of Timothy Titus, and when yon
will find it, you will find it in these
words:-- SO.
lsAnd they shall knaw o file und
flee unto the mountains of ofHepsidam,
where the lion roareth and wang-doo-
die mourneth for it's frst.born."
Now, my breethering, as | have be-
fare told you, | am ali uneddicated
man, and know nothing about gram.
mar talk and coolidge hiialootin; but
Pm plain, unlarnt preacher of the
gospil, what's been torordained and
called to expound the ScripterS to a
dyin' world, and prepare a preVerse
generation for the day Of wrath; for
"They shall knaw a file and flee nm
to the mountains Of Hepsidam, where
the lion roareth and the wang-dooddle
mournoth for its first born"
My beluv.ed breethering, the text
says "they shall knaw a file" 1t
don't say they may, but they ShaU.-
And now there's more'n one kind of
file. There's the handsaw file, rat
tail file, single file, double file and pro-
file, but the kind of file spoken Of here
isn't one of them kind, either; bnt it's
a figger of speech, my breethering,
and means goin' it alone and getting
ukered; for "they shall knaw a file
and flee unto the mountains Of Hep.
sidam, where the lion roareth and the
wang-doodle mourneth for its first
born"
And now there be some here with
fine close on thar backs, brass rings
on thar fingers, and lard on thar har,
what goes it while there young; and
thar be brothers here what, SO long as
their constitutions and forty cent
whisky last, goes it blind; and there
be sisters here what, when they gets
sixteen years old, cuts thar tiller ropes
and goes it with rush; but | say, my
breethering, take care you don't find
when Gabriel PLAYS his last trump,
that you've all went it alone and got
ukered; for ''they shall knaw a file
and flee unto the mountains Of Hep
sidam, where the lion roareth and the
wang-doodle. mourneth for its first
born"
And my breethering, there's more
dams besides Hepsidam. There's
Rotterdam, Iaddam, Amsterdam,
mill dam and don't-care-a'dam the
last of which, my dear breethering, is
the worst OF all, and reminds me OF a
circumstance once knew in the State
of Illenoy. There was q man what
built him a mill on the east fork Of
Agur creek, and it was a good mill
and ground a site of grain, but the
man what built it was a miserable
sinner, and never Civ anything to the
church; and, my dear breethering,
one night thar cum dreadful storm
Of wind and rain, and the fountains
Of the great deep were broken ny, and
the waters rushed down and swept
that mans mill dam into kingdom
come, and 10 and behold! in the NOR.
ming when he got up he found he was
not worth a dam. Now, my young
breethering, g,when storms or temptation
overtake ye, take care you don't fall
from grace and become like that mill,
not worth dam; for "they shall knaw
file and flee unto the mountains Of
Hepsidam, whar the lion roareth and
the wang-doOdle mourneth for its
first born" .
"Whar the lion roareth and the
wang.doodle mourneth for its first
born" This part Of my text, my
Lreethering, is also iigger of speech,
and isn't to be taken as it says. 1t
dose'nt mean the howlin' wilderness,
whar John the hard shell Baptis was
fed on locus and wild asses, but it
means, my breethering, the city of
New Orleans, the mother OF harlots
and hard lots-whar corn is worth
six bits a-bushel one day and marry
red the next; whar niggers are as
thick as black bugs in spilled bacon
ham, and gamblers, thieves and
pickpockets 60 skitting about the
streets like weasels in barn yard
whar they have cream colored horses,
gilded carriages, marble saloons with
brandy and sugar in them--whar hon4
est men are scarcer than hens teeth,
and whar a strange woman once tux
! in your beluyed preacher and bam-
boozled him out OF two hundred and
twenty-seven dollars in the twinkling
of a sleeps tail; but she can't do it
again, Aallelujah! for ''they shall
knaw file and fee unto mountains
of Hepsidam, whar the lion roareth
and the wang-doodle mourneth for
! its first born" lf9