Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1857-12-09
!, e,..r rrnm the pisbnnded Volunteer.

EiiiytRrs OTthe SUNDAY 4'Hse'' cb;rohnI
.,- "A IaS NTH as mItch flshinabul toggery on
~ bacl, nc mOught. at first cost, hev saved ten
,'oo- fammaIies from starvaShin, must be con-
El;Job,I Of a Sunday treat for the Old Sarpint;
,Darsoom tharfor. the internal critter lWled
iissoIf oudashuslv at a sartin uptown gospli-
Nails that looks heap more ike :; the"y.
than church, whar happened IN TO GIT h'ou'I i
full of kid-glove relidjin, just by way oil sanu.
witch. last Sunday forenoon. Atno PuiS
smart chance of the hevinly minded congrega
shin was absent from the holy edlliz, still thar
was euuff cxpensiv lace, miIlindery, SILK 0s'
lantern and other flmmynine bats Tor Dache-
Tors TO afford the most lively satistackshln TO
his Satanick mddiesty. The cunnln Ola Cooh
hes n mity easy time of it, seems to me, IN TINS
blessed age OF miSshinnerrles, track sosltleS'
Bible unions, camp-meehns, ana othcr lhNell,
shins for the conveyance OF the hevin-"arG
bound. Formally he he'd to keep mOyin to and
fro on the airth lookin out for the trails OF SIN
ners, and follering up and Skcwrln EN- omen
they Clident happen to .skwirm outer his tngerS)
by his own pursenal cxershins. To borry the
remark of a niger minister wunst heerd preech
in Exeter Hall, London-"In dem times de deb
bill be like. roaring lion; he go bout, seekln
whom he find, and cherry now and den he ketch
sumboddv, / bound for him." This kinder
prowlin about ON his own hook was continued,
as we larn from skripter, to the time of job
When he got permisshin to inockilate that mis-
fortnit crtter with skrOfily, and destroy all his
| beef and sheep meat, he thOrt he he'd sure
| thing; but Job, ben real good 'un, in course
proved more than n match for Abaddon, and
went to glory i'll spite of varus infarnal tempta-
shins, incudin his affeckshinit wife's advice. In
these days, hOwseveT, Satan hes no call to go
spookin about for prey. He does all his temp
tashin by deputy. Vanity and SPeckylashin
to saw nuthin of fifty uther SpontanuS agints-is
a-pecplin his terrortories with rush ekwil to
his warInest andissipaShins.
! But to return from Bezybub to the aforesaid
Fashinabul Church: The day was plesent and
the readin of the Rev. Mr.. Barney Bland q kali
! kilate you've heerd on him) was surprisingly
monotonous and condusiv to slumber. Jest as
ne opend the Bible to take his tex, Idrapt off:
But mine warnt an Improbable snooZe, for ]
drernt short sarmint witch Idc be willin to bet
a bowie nife to a bishop, was rayther more to
the pint than ennything that was ever got off
By the Rev. Barney Bland I.Sposed however,
in my dream, as twas him as was delverin it,
and as | recollect the hull discourse ut warnt
long enuif to be tejus) lie repeat the words as
they peered to issoo from his lips:
TIE sAKMlNT / ORIENT.
Brethren and sisters-sisters espcshilly:
take my tex from 10th, 18th, 10Th, Goth, Dist
22d, and Odd verses of the Sd chapter of Isaiah
emitting u few Onnesscssary Sentinces:
"'l6. Because the daughters of Zion are
naughty, and walk with stretched forth necks
and wanton eyes, walking and MINCING AS THEY
leo
'IS The Lord will take away the bravery OF
their tinkling ornaments, and their cauls and
their round tires, like the moon,
"19. The chains, and the bracelets, and the
mufllers
100. The rings, and the noscjewels,
"2I. The changeable suits of apparel, and
a.,
/" '22. And the glasses, and the rlno linen and
the hoods and the walls
"t23. And it shall come to pass that instead
of gir,lle there shall be rent; and instead of
wells set hair baldncsS and instead of stomach
cr girding of sackcloth.'
| "This is my tex, and it seems to me from a
cumparison atween the darters of Zion and the
darters of New York, now before me, that VIM
min is purity much the same in this rowdy city
in 1857 rs in the Holy City in the year of the
world 5000, be the same more or less, but pro-
bly, more In this respeck New York might
not improperly be nicknamed the New Jcroosa-
Hem. The profit complains of bellies of Zion
'mincing as they 60 limadgin tharS no differ
nce as regards the moshin, atwiXt mincing and
teeterin. The "tires. round like the moon
worn 10y the dashing IIcbrewesSes, was evident
ly hoops which is jest about the size of ordi,
nary wheel tires. Changeable silks too, it would
Sceln were all tue 20 on UOIllef size oil J0TQOn
thirty scntrics sense, Jest as they are here al
present The profit also is down ON the bonncts
of the Jeroosalim buties. | dessay, beloved
sisters, that they resemhled those misabul little
top-knot cases, that lends such brazen appear
ance TO Your protrudin countinances The fem
mynineS of the chosin people had also pashin
for iewelry, and i'll this department. of the fash.
ms they went lectle ahead of you-thar noses
being dcckyrated with rings Ia moie des0ine
You hevent arriv at that pitch of refinement
nor am awar that you sport any ornimcnts on
your locomotive limbs, but then You make up
for these detiShinsies with other fol-de-rols.
"Now, it appears from the sSripterS that the
Lord sentenced the buty and fashin of Jereosa.
lin to be stripped of all thar fancy riggin, to
BEGUN bald, and to wear baSks of sacking.-
Why, oh! my mincing, lettering, thimbIe
bonnelted, hoped, ringed, braceletted, silk.
girted, and otherwise extensively bedizzened
sisters-why, say, should not you be denood
ed of your jimcracks, and get the sack instead
like the fair Jewcsses of 5000 years ago? Let
me advise you to forstalI the rath to cum Go
strait to your dwellings-lont swing You,
skearts on the way-take off all superflooities
OF dress and Jewels; sell EN-, sell all your trum
perry, and give the mummy to the Five Points
| MiSshin and the Orfan Asylum. Or eff you have
driven your fathers or husbands to the verge of
room by your extravaganza, give the cash tc
them to take mp protested notes with and save
them the mortificashin of shining Wall street