The Council Bluffs nonpareil. [volume] (Council Bluffs [Iowa]) 1857-1867, 1857-10-10
AN IRONICAL PEOPLE.


quatsly express our thoughts, which will
not te chained down to the pure old Saxon
At last we exhaust the vocabulary. The
most startling and intensified parts of speech
become common place and insipid. Hence
we ADOPT irony, delicate sort of sarcasm.
to give greater weight and pointedness t.
our utterances. ..... -.. -s.....
You twist into crowded omnibus. Six.
teen tenacious individuals resolved into a
Heterogeneous mass of skirts, buttons, whis.
kers, knees, noses and baskets, stare uncon.
genially at you. You make a meek and
pathetic appeal for information as to wheth.
er there is room. A pinioned and statuesque
party in q tight place says. 90 plenty OF
roomG-the . and the ROOM being very
strongly emphasized. The coach starts
with the customary jerk backwards and
plunge forward. In obedience to the rule
of gravitation, you vibrate and stagger, and
your heavy heel is bestowed on the foot ol
q phlethoric old gentleman with an old style
stock about his neck, resembling a silken
wall. His face turns purple and his eyes
twist and roll like balls Of quick silver
sBeg your pardon-hurt?' you quickly ejac.
ulate, with the most affectionate concern
man Of oorns, in so decided a tone, that the
inference would be quite natural that it af-
forded him genuine satifaction to have his
feet trolden upon-that the operation was
attended with intense pleasure. Whereas
he is shifting his mouth tightly, grimacing
and cleIching his lists, in style which
would Indicate considerable physical suffer
ing. Into the open space created by the
exit of great deal of crinoline and little
flesh, bone and curls, you ultimately settle
down. You are unfortunate enough to oc-
cupy that seat of all seats most uncomforta-
ble-the one directly underneath the aper-
ture through which q huge soiled hand is
squeezed at short intervals. Of course,
everybody makes use of you as a paying tel
ter. The passenger who was never known
to have anything under q dollar, imparts
that slippery and intangible coin to YOU with
The i..imation that you will please hand ii
up. You exercise all your sagacity and
60 through with dexterous manipulations,
before you succeed in placing the dollar se-
eurely between the pendant fingers.
When the digits re-appear, they are en-
twined about a miniature mint of small
coins and coppers, in disengaging which,
from the clutch of the driver, several pieces
slip between your fingers and diffuse among
the straw of the floor. Three trying min
utes are consumed in finding them, but on
restoring them to the complacent owner,
you assure him that it was not the least
;rouble, and not worth mentioning. But
there is deep irony in your words, and in
tle awful smile which plays around your
streaming face.
When the atmosphere is particularly fer
vd, and the murcury lowering about, We
say to each other, as We wipe our faces and
fan, Cool weather, amt it?' to which in
terrogatory the reply always is, 80! very
oooLp zig zig
You are caught in heavy shower. The
food gates of the clouds are open wide, and
the rain is coming down in torrents. You
don't happen to have an umbrella, and there
happens to be no contiguous awning or 9TH
e: shelter. As you push franticaliy ahead
with your head down to the beating deluge,
you come in collision with some one else
an acquaintance-who also happens not to
have an umbrella. And as dripping and
melancholy recognition takes place, he says:
pleasant, this?' and you say: sDelightful!'
and go on your wet way.
WeSpe1A VI y @AoSclS otutc VI SocletS,
thereby denoting murder, or two murders
a day, prize fight, Mrs. Cunningham, and
an sfolla podrida" Of suicides, assassina-
tions, swindles and pollutions.
When We want to force the conviction
that somebody is mighty good looking, We
have only to call that somebody awfully ug-
ly; and Of singularly ill-favored creature
we are apt to observe, 'lsn't he Tor she) a
beauty?' .z ,.a7se@ AZ .ns $50
An acquaintance has just returned from
a jaunt. He assures us that he had q de-
lightful time; oh! splendid time! and pro-
ceeded to narrate his experiences. lie lost
his trunk, hau his pocket-book stolen while
asleep in the cars, missed a very important
connection, was taken sick in strange
place, and had to come back without reach
ing his purposed destination at all.
This article has no moral. Practical re-
hections are therefore wanting. We only
wish to have it understood thas We are an
ironical people.-Phila. Journal.
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