Weekly hawk-eye and telegraph. [volume] (Burlington, Iowa) 1855-1857, 1857-02-11
FLAMING OLD xLEDGE rOR THE
PAE11DENCY-D DREAM or SUI
1OVEN(sOODsD.
By s- or rxxxEssKr.

FLAMING OLD xLEDGE FOR THE
fmEs1nEMCY- DREAM OF SU1
/ By s-- or rKxxKssEx.
well, Sut, what was your dream! Tell US;
ever you did dream anything smart your friend
ought 70 know it for the benefit of you car &C
| ter, for cuss me fyou ever even thought any
thing smart awake.n
/ Thus bantered, Sus leaned against the rough
board counter Of the doggery, With q tumbler O
whiskey in one hand, while the other SOUNDED
for the bottom OF hole in his breeches, By
courtesy called a pocket--took small sip,. and
/ began to tell his dream. Hear him, reader
| speak for himself:
'Gentle-menl / dreampt an unpossibilisy
last mite. 1 wur in Washington City, and
know never will be thar onless they take me
thar u hang ur crucifv me for drinkin' more nuY
my sheer ov 'the peoples drink Old Rot Gut.
But in my dream was thar, and no mistake
sartin-sure-at laundering big tavern, whar
they rung little bells tn keep frum hollerin arter
niggars an making a noise; and whar they cal.
led yu tn yur mush by ratlin on big still bot.
tom just fur the sake ov the noise, an whar they
took thirty dimes day fur doin nuthin fur yu;
an whar they gin you sase enuf tn make yu fte
(tu home) fur nuthin at all Darn the seat cy
govurnment IAN darn every body say.n
Tell your dream before you get drunk, you
long-legged cuss you, or let somebody tell it
for you"
Thus reproved, Sut sheered into the channel
again:
'Well arter supper awhile nosed round ontil
got inter room whar seed lite, and thar
set three fellers playin oy old sledge."
aOld What?'
"Sesen-np, you drotted weazle skinned, frog.
legged son ov a kangaroo"
This was addressed to young specimen Of
the order intensus Americanus anti-P opeatibux
muddteusinus, who shone resplendent from K,
in tights, small cane and watch-ribbon, and had
laudable desire to learn something of the hid.
den mysteries Of 'old sledge.' He played on ah
ssthemetic trombone and s'schess" when in the
''They wur playin seven up with bran new
kerds, spank span new, an no marks, every fell
Ter fur his self seemingly. Now, gentlemen 1
believe kin smell kerds, eff they are in motion,
as fur from here tn the spring, ur how the dew
il did happin tn hit onto that room whar gam
boiling wur gwine on?. But thar did go by
in-stink. reckin, an the three fellers wur no.
body on yearth but Buck-cannon, Fillmore, and
Fremont, and they wur playin single game
ov seven.up for the Presidents cheer ov these
free and United Z Pluribus States, thirty.one in
number, an kiverin the whole yearth.
Thar wur anuther chap inter that room, with
one hand under his coatail, an tother stricken
ov his chin, walkin about sorter keerless like,
but fust lookin inter Fillmores hand and then
inter Fremont's an then winkin and frownin,
fust at one ov them and then tother. Then he'd
tiptoe an try to peep inter Bucks hand. But
the old Teller hlt it under the shadder the Ia
BILE and sorter looked at it sideways his self an
was watchin the peepin Teller, too, all the while
rite clost. His name was Sea-ward ur Hell-ward,
ur sumthin ov that sort, no matter which. Now,
gentlemen, kin play old sledge myself rite
peart, ali when seed that it wur game of two
pluck one, and that Buck-cannon was bound to
be skinned, eff his hide didn't grow fast onto his
bones, got as mad as bee in swarmin time,
and iist thought (mind l sed nuthin) that I'd
like tn mock enuf off that chaps skull tn make
built ladle, eff dared tn. He is a darned snake
in the grass, sure.
Well, after they had played out thar hands,
Mister Buck.cannOn SEE, bowin nifty purlite,
II believe, gentlemen, made high, jack, and
that has sot me six, eff Amt mistaken" Then
both on EN-, Fillmore and Fremount, spread all
O Bucks tricks out onter the table till they saw
his ace ov trumps and the jack of trumps which
he had cotch from Fillmore with the king, and
then they agreed that he wus six. sea-ward
sec, eyes, he reconed that was the state of the
year old gal, sed, 81 made low, you kotch my
JUICE with yer ace, Mister Buck-cannon, an that
sits me three" All agreed on that count, an
Fremount leanin his cheer back Whispered be-
hind his hand tn me, land id low it was too,
don't yu think so? and his black must-tuchus
twisted up like onto two cork screws: but
all ov them agreed that Fillmore was three,
an no mistake Fremount then said, 81 made
game, and that sot me six with you, Mister Buck
cannon" Buck bowed agn tn that, but Fillmore
sed, "Si-r-r, I'll count game with you; this is
not adzactly aecordin to our understandin SIR"
and fur the first time he looked as if he mought
be made to fte Sea-ward frown'd, shook his
head, winked, and sweated mightily.-Fremont
did so too, an all at old Fillmore, but it warn't
no use, count game he would; an Fremont beat
him one. So that sot the game-Buck six, Ere.
mount six, an Fillmore three-an Bucks deal,
and Fremount's beg or stand.
Buck licked his thumb an delt 'em mighty
slow and keerful. looked at Fillmore's kerds
as he got EN- from the deal, anti like tn knock'd
me down. Thar was the ace, the king, the
queen, the jack, the ten an tile Juice ov trumps
Thinks !, O, Lordy! and then looked at him,
an thar the old fellor sot; his belly kiverin the
cheer all over, and nearly out tn his knees, as
solemn, as big, an about as wise as an old dutch
squire tryin ov bastardly case with good
proof agin the daddy. tell you, boys, he look
ed jist like he had his fust big horn ov whiskey
fur the mite, and felt in his boots. tho't o
Lordy! agin.
Buck never turned up his hand but axed
Fremount what he meant tn do. He looked at
his kerds, sorted EN-, then looked at EN- agin,
then up at the lamp, then at Buck, scratched his
year, shot up his eyes, and very slowly sed,
beg. By tho jumpin Jehosephat Buck run
EN- quick, an tho't it no harm tn take another
look at old Fill. He fotch low collicky kind
ov grunt, and then he blowed. swar the wind
that cofae out of his nose, mouth, eyes an years
like tn put the lamp out.
I lodged and TUX peep inter Fremounts
hand, and now swear, that when a mans six
on q big game ofsevenup Inever seen just such
kerds. He hilt together three aces, bound to be
high let what would cum-in-out-an out Presi-
dent at that. Thinks l, 0 Lordy Buck 20 Lordy
make the President outen that darned mule eat
en- Fremount-when thars nara nonuthin in hell
if he didn't turn jack st as easy as ef thard been
fifty two oy EN- in the deck, an then only leaned
back and smiled loud, fur President Fillmore
rared backwards outen his cheer and tainted as
comfortable on the floor as an old maid at quilt
in when the kssin begins Fremount's eyes
turned green-the har on the back of his head
riz up like the teeth of comb, his must-such us
turned up towards his eyes, he brayed like mule
an at one jump kivered old Fill as he lay, an then
sot in tn bitin an chokin an maulin oy him like
the Devil beatin hominy. This sort Of excite
ment fotch the old Teller tn, an as soon as he
felt all the hurtin that was gwine on all over
him, inside an out, he sot rite tn ftin like an old
stud boss, and thar they had it. looked at
Buck, (who still helt the kerds in his hand with
the jack turned up on top,) as much as tn say,
"shall part em:" He shook his he'd, and put
my hands in my pockets an KEEP outen thar way.
They fit some time, I tell ye; har-wool-fur-an
feathers few, sorter like ginin cotton. Seward
cut dirt as soon as that awful jack was turned,
locked the door ON the outside, and went strait
to prar meetiD in Ninth street, whar reckon
he is yet. Well, thar they fit and grunted, and
every now an then Fremont would bray like on
to mule, and Fillmore wud grunt out sumthin-
about somebody's box an fusion Now eff fusion
means mirin they war fused, about as well as
two pints of bald face in quart flask on q hard
trottin hoss. An ov all the darned noises ever
did hear! they shook that big tavern tn the
ground. An walked all ov lather of SWEET an
then just turned over in the bed and cried like
baby.
''What for, Suts"
Case walked up afore either hollered, and
never will know which whipped Old Buck