Lynchburg daily Virginian. [volume] (Lynchburg [Va.]) 1852-1861, 1857-05-16
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4 Few GaOaVhss bOn 1e n ting.

4 Few GaO"Vhss pom Rating.
lbc liver acts upon the mind as the elements
net upon thermometer. happy man cannot
bc conceived who does not possess good diges-
tion. aud n good digestion almost every one
would ENJOY. were II not for nbomnable msmnn-
ngement, II sort Of VanJalo destruction Of nor
ml powers, which is equally want N and sense
less. Almost every European nation may be
considered. upon the whole. more hea,hful than
we are. The reason is two.fold. First, they do
not convert themselves into walking ohimneys
which matter of duty, must be continually
filed with smoke; and secondly. they do not run
against Time. striving to dispatch their meals
within the limited space Of three minutes and .
quarter. An American liable dhote,' is u sim
gular spectacle. No sooner has that horrid in
strument, which wo owe TO the dabolical ingenui-
ty of the Chinese, ceased to sound its car. split
ting notes, than n heterogeneous throng, Of all
sizes aud ages, press forward zen mdsse," tram-
ping on each others toes, IN order to pro cure ell
gibe senis near the favorlte dishes. Them for
an instant all is silent, aud you begin to think it
possible thnt you have mistaken your mon, and
that you mny be Notwithstanding that dreadful
rush. or "conp de mdin'O among reasonable
Christian creatures. But alas tho very next
moment dispes the Illusion. The covers are alb
straoted aud ten what fearful onslaught upon
fish. flesh and fowl" The soup being FUSED
up" nt gulph, and whole plates Of vegetables
disposed of as mere "bdgateties," an attack com.
mences upon the heavier viands, which IL like
wise successful, and ends in their, too, dissolv-
ing like the aseless fabric of vision. n."-Great
sepuohral mouths CLOSE upon whatever is con.
veyod lhher with II remorseleSs raPldity, which
leaves no time for mastioation and just the frao-
ton OF IA second for deglutition. Bread is con-
sumed by tho half loaf, and meat by the cubic
foot As for these triics styled side dishes they
pass away by iegerdemdin, which We have never
been able detect, but which is equally success
A. 4 l.. ..s...
NJ pickles, and the other ct ceferas of feast ap.
pear to merge, of their own accord into the ma
terial of tho weighter viands, as asteroids will H.
naly Y merge into the sun. minute serves for
tho first eourse--a minute for the secondhand,
occasionally. when business is not particularly
urgent n minute and quarter is given 10 the
third. Thus, the average meal time is accom-
plshed, aud tho scores of satisfied diners, hav-
ing gorged themselves after the manner OF the
crocodile. aud succeeded in materially increasing
their ordinary weight, stroll away with facility
which is astonishing, considering the amount Of
matter that they have swallowed whole, aud
which taken in that condition, even the ana
oonda cannot digest properly under a week.
But when consider that these persons repeat,
with but slight modification, the operation
hive described three times day. II becomes
matter of melancholy reflection and grave solio-
iude How many years of life cut off by u
system like this, it would be difficult to deter
mine. nor is il worth the while, (and we do not
intend to advance any inhuman propostion) men
who such sayages AS to gormandizo thus. de-
to be taken to another and-a more fruitful
world.
And yet we moderns (Americans especially
pretend 10 rdcuIe the elegant epicurism Of the
nncirnt-. (hoso imaginative and refined indi
viduals.) whose most sensual delights had some
thing Of sentiment mingled with them. Instead
of huge -urIons 'f halt roasted beef, tough nut
ton, aud greasy fragments Of the jews abomina-
tion, the articles most in request among the Ro-
mans. and which never failed 10 constitute the
''ca"na," Of the wealthy. were according to Varro
-"the peacock from Samos, the Phrygian tur-
key, cranes from Melos, Ambracian kids the Tar
testian mullet, trouts from Persenumtium, Tar
entihe, oysters, crabs from Chios Tatian nuts.
Egyiinn dates. and Iberian chesnuts." There
reader think If that and reflect, besides, that all
these dainti"s were served upon plates of gold.
and in chambers where tho "perfumed air" stole
around the statues of gold, and rustled the roses
upon the brows of the banqueters. And in the
pauses of the feast. music from soft ues.' stole
IN from some unseen recess, and lullad the sem
SOS to an Elysian quiet, best suited to contem-
paion-and digestion. All the "lutter day."
Romans. in losing the stern virtues Of their an-
oestors gained profound knowledge and appre-
citation of all the mysteries Of the "cnisine," and
when we've, the barbarians Of the present age,
at what we term their sumptuous ostenta.
ton, we only expose our own ignorance and
blindness, to the fascinating philosophy of one of
the 'Fine arts"
But says the modern gourmand despite those
"soft lutes," sweet roses, 'perfumed air." and
golden plate, julius Caesar ate, at meal the re-
venue of several provinces. Vtellus made four
great meals day. Nero sat at table from mid
day till midnight. Geta had an incredible num-
ber of dishes served up to him in alphabetical
order; and the emperor Heliogabalus possessed
the ''insanest stomach" of any man Except Pope
julius IiD who ever lived to eat" True. un-
deniably true but all desire to convey is
that if persons will gormandize thus f,rocously.
let them, at least, use some discrimination, and
not eat themselves in the grave at twenty five by
mingling edibles. most gross, most heavy. and
most indigestbe. devoured after the manner of
swine and selected after the manner of South
Sea Islanders. at the annual celebration in honor
of their deties.-Russelrs Magazine.