davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
PlowsE PIowaI PIowaI

WTE cal especial attention to the following ad-
w yertisement, from which it viii be seen that
we are the only agents Kanzas for the sale or the
Celebrated Moline Center Draft PIosE.
We have sold several hundred of them this season,
and al give perfect satisfaction.
ALLEN 4 GILMORE.
John Deere's Moline PIows Ia Kanzasi
|AN the opening of navigation in the s;ring,-I
" ehall send TO Messrs. Allen Il Gilmore Law
renee, *. T., large assortment of Breakers of all
sizes, especially of my extra fwo-Herse Mould
Board Breakers, vhick has received the highest
conImen dations from an who hase used them; al
so great variety Of Stirring, or old Ground Flows,
among which would mention the Improved Clip
per, the No. 4 on Eng cast steel PIow, and the
Michigan Double or Subson PIoE which sheuld
receive the especial attention OF those who wish to
raise crop the first year. / have made some i'm
provements on this pillow from last wear, and be-
iieve 1t Is now perfect to be used Western soil
Also, Corn Plows, CultixatoFs, double and single
shovel Ploxs, Rolling Cutters and Clasps, Gauge
wheels, Truck Wheels, and other Plow fixtures.
/ The quality Of the stock used IN my plows Is not
equAlIed by any establishments in the West, and
the plows are finished IN a very superior style
Having been engaged for eighteen years In the
manufacture of pEows for use the Western States
entirely, can confidently say to emigrants from
the Eastern States that these ploEs Till scotT and
work perfectly in any soil in the Mississippi Val
ley.
All orders addressed to ALLEN & GILMORE, Law
renee, X T., o. 20 me ct Moline, Rock Island Co,
iuaef-iv JOHN DEERE.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

BUCHANAN AND WEBsTER.-Soen after
the great e1pounder had discharged one OF
his heavy guns in the United States senate,
a gentleman was extolling him to Buchan-
an. Eyes, - said the latter, che is great
statesman, but no politician. - The same
individual met Mr. Webster few days sub
sequently, and improved the occasion to
elicit his opinion of the philosopher OF
Wheatland, and singularly enough, he said
of Buchanan, she is a great politician, but
no statesman. Boston Transcript.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
Hercises for school Girls.

The subject of education is attracting
much attention In the country, and within
the last few years great Improvements have
been made
But although much has been done, the
work of reformation is not complete. There
is one giaring defect which must be reme-
died, ere we can eonscientiously remain qui-
eseent. This defect Is the want of proper
physical exercise in girls schools.
In all the better classes of boys schools,
a gymnasium is considered an indispensa-
bic appendage; while girls are suffered TO
grow up without the advantages necessary
for the perfect development of the system.
As the occupations of the female sex are
more sedentary than those of men, the for
mer should be armed with vigorous consti-
tutions, to enable them to perform their du-
ties In life. On the contrary, the greater
portion of girls have no other exercise than
walk to school; which, however long, is
insufficient to develop the muscles of the
arms and chest.
Most of the maladies and weaknesses OF
modern ladies are attributable to the want
of proper physical training in youth. Pale
cheeks, headache, indigestion, and nervous
debility, are, in the majority of cases, pro-
duced by the same cause, from which also
arises that scourge of the female sex. spine
disease, in its various forms.
In all institutions of learning in this
country. an apartment fitted up for gymnas-
tic exercises should be considered indis-
pensable. In that case, rosy cheeks and
fnely-formed busts would no longer be un-
common.
It has been remarked that the race is de-
generating in the United States; and among
the various causes assigned as the reason
for it, the heat of our climate in summer,
aud the rigor of our winters, have been the
chief. Should not the want of proper ply
steal education of girls be rather adduced?
Can healthy offspring proceed from frail
and delicate parent? Let the mothers be
endowed with vigorous constitutions, and
there viii be as little likelihood of,degenera-
cy of the race in this country as in any
other. =
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

An old woman who lived near the from
tier during the last war with Great Britain,
and possessed a marvellous propensity to
learn the news, used frequently to make in
quiries of the soldiers. On one occasion
she called to one of those defenders of our
rights whom she had frequently saluted be-
fore:
whats the news?''
..Why, good woman, y said he, 'tthe In
dians have fixed crow-bars under Lake
Erie, and are going to turn it over and
drown the world'
'Oh mercy! what shall do?" and away
she ran to tell the neighbors of the danger,
and inquire how such a calamity could be
aYerted.
s.Wby,'' said he, .'you need not be
alarmed-we have our Makers promise
that He will not again destroy the world by
water"
81 know that returned the old lady,
hesitatingly, s'but He's nothing to do with
tits them plaguey Idian So
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
Col. T1tus.

This hero IS again to shed his benishant
influence in Kanzas. The N. o. Delta, just
received, says: ss
By private letter, received BY gentle
man of this city, we learn that Col. Titus is
about TO depart from New York to Kanzas.
He complains bitterly of the injustice done
him by the Nicaraguan correspondents, and
declares his intention to make good his rep
utation for bravery, If occasion arises, in that
territory.
s'The northern abolition papers. he says,
twill have enough to do to keep track of
me-
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
DIR. C. c. SLOCUM,
Physician and Surgeon,
ENPORIA HOUSE,
n6yl EMPORIA, KANZAS.
THE NEWSPAPER RECORD.

WORK OF VALUE TO
Editors, Publishers, Advertisers and Bu-
SinesS Men,
A ND of great interest to Printers; containing a
N complete list of Newspapers in the United
States Canadas, and Great Britain-the only work
of the kind in the World. 1t also presents es-
say on the History of Newspapers and Printing,
from the earliest ages to the present time eompar
ing the past with the present, and giving much
formation that can be obtained from no other
source Various improvements in Printing Ma
chinery are also described and illustrated.
Sent by mail, prepaid on the receipt of 49, 90.
Address, LAY & BROTHER, Publishers,
augI No. 50 Dock Street, Philadelphia.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
The Editor,s Advisers.

Says one, your subjects are too grave,
Too much morality sou have
Too much about religion
Give me some witch or wizard tales,
With sIip-shod ghosts, with fns and scales.
Or feathers ike pigeon
love to read, another cries,
Those monstrous fashionable lies
In other words, those novels,
Composed of kings. and queens. and lords.
of border wars and gothic hordes,
That used to live in novels
Mono, cries one, we've had enough
OF such confounded loye-siek stuff,
To craze the fair creation
Give us some recent foreign news,
OF Russian, Turk, the Greeks and Jews,
Or any other nation.
another cries, I want more fnn.
A witty anecdote or pun.
a rebus or riddle:
Some long for missionary news, z
And some, of worldly earnaI views,
Would ike to hear fiddle.
- =
Another cries, want to see
A jumbled up variety
Variety in all things;
A miscellaneous hodge-podge print
Composed-only to give that hint
OF multifarious small things.
1 want some marriage news, says miss,
1t constitutes my highest bliss
= To hear Of weddings plenty;
For In time of general rain,
None suffers from drought, It's plain
At least not one in twenty. -
] want to hear of deaths, says one,
OF people totally undone
BY losses, FIRE, or fever;
Another ans wers full as wise,
I'd rather have the fall and rise
OF raeeoon skins or beaver.
Some signify secret wish
For now and then savory dish
Of politics to suit them
But here we rest at perfect ease,
For should they swear the moon was cheese,
We never should dispute them.
OF grave or humorous, wild or tame,
Lofty or low, It's all the same,
Too naughty or too humble.
And every editorial wight
Has nought to do but what is right,
And let the grumbler grumble.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
The sham Family.

Mr.. Sham lives up town in brown-stone
front, with damask and lace at the windows.
He Is a respectable man, always courteous
and ready to do you kindness, or to make
an ingenious excuse if he cannot Mr. Sham
hires his coach and horses by the year, and
his handsome coachman, too; but, if he
spoke of them, he would tell you, in round
terms, that his establishment cost him cool
two thousand; and he wouldn think of keep
ing SO expensive an equipage, only Mrs.
Sham's health is delicate, and the little
Shams, eooped as they are in the city, need
a dashing watch, with heavy seal and chain,
that look very much like gold, owing to a
singular custom of their owner, who uses a
certain white powder and piece of buck
skin on them every morning; and nobody
surmises that Mr.. Sham would wear any
thing but gold. That worthy gentleman is
constantly talking of his family across the
water, all of whom are dukes and duchesses,
lords and ladies, and squires of high degree.
He is to come into possession of a fabulous
fortune when somebody dies, for whom he
has too sincere a respect to wish that con-
summation deYoutly. He is going to buy
such and such a country seat the next sum-
mer, if business will only be kind enough
just to slack little, a very little, just long
enough to let him run up to L. or D., to
survey the premises and examine the deed.
Everything belonging to Mr.. Sham is mort
gagged, except his wife and children, and so
are they, to an inexorable degree, to ultimate
ruiai Mr.. Sham is. great boaster; in plain
language, Mr.. Sham is great liar; he has
when he tells the truth himself; indeed, his
conscience only troubles him when he is not
inyenting.
Mrs. Sham!-a magnificent person in red
velvet, and a grand match for her husband.
Dine with Mrs. Sham. Hear her regret
that her head cook Ia fabulous parsonage
was unfortunately taken sick. and is suffer
ing up stairs with headache. Notice her
reprimand to Harriet Jane, the eldest daugh-
ter, that she did not make that stupid Bidy
put on the best set of silver. Hear her talk
of the pleasure of her last years travelling
tour, when she staid at home all summer,
shut up in the back part of her house Be
hold her jewelry, paste and Irish diamonds;
her laee-nothing but sham in place of the
real. Listen to the stories she tells of her
childhood: if you did not know that her
mother was once an honest, hard working
wash-woman, you would be tempted to be-
lieye that she had never taken step on the
cold ground in her life before she was mar
ried and that III some way she was related to
Queen Victoria or 70 Louis Napoleon
The little Shams are epitomes of both pa
rents. They begin already to substitute the
false for the real; to brag of deeds they new
er performed; to. talk of families they never
visited; and to watch each other closely,
that there may be no discrepancies. Poor,
unhappy little Shams! what a life they viii
lead and if they should happen to fall from
even the scale in which they appear at pres
ent to be snugly balanced, fear they will
find apartments in strong house with iron
bars at the windows, and whose degradation
and discipline are anything but shams
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

81 am astonished at your decision, -
said young lawyer to judge, who had
declared against him. "This remark can
not be permitted said the judge, 'tand
an apology will be necessary on your part. .
s'Permit me-" said the senior counsel,
''to offer an excuse for my young friend;
he is new in these matters, and when he
has practiced as long before your honor as
I have, he will be astonished atnothing!"
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

A printer not long ago. being flung" by
his sweetheart, went to the Office and tried to
commit suicide with the shooting stick, -
but the thing wouldn't go off. The ''devif, ,
wishing to pacify him, told him to peep into
the sanctum where the editor was writing
duns to delinquent subscribers. He did SO,
and the effect was magical. Hesays that the
picture of despair which he there beheld full
lY reconciIed him to his fate.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

FAULrs IL BOTH Sexes In recent fa-
miliar chat between Madam Aimz and the
celebrated DR.. Human, the lady took occa-
sion to remark that, ''the men of the pres
ent age, if for any one thing above another,
are celebrated for wearing false hearts!"-
Eyes, my dear madam, % pithily rejoined the
doctor, s.and the ladies for false 6osonssi''
Madam Airnz screeched.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

A bachelor correspondent sends the Bos-
ton Post the following .'Tell me ye wing
ed winds that round my pathway roar, do ye
not know some spot where women fret no
more? Some lone and pleasant dell, some
sholler' in the ground. where babies never
yell, and cradles are not found? The loud
wind blew the snow into my face. and snick-
cred as it answered, mary place. -
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
C. V. RIDGE,
GEN ERAL LAND AGENT

Agent of the Emporia Town Company.
TOWN SHARES bought and sold-Lots dona-
Il ted to persons putting certain amount of i'm
proyements on them. Declaratory statements for
Pre-Emptors made out, and all business in relation
bought and Sold Claimants desiring to sell their
claims, by registering them at my Office, will be
furnished with purchasers. Land Warrants dis
posed of, and investments made for capitalists in
any part of the Territory Legal instruments.
Deeds, Mortgages, Contracts, Conveyanees, Co.
partnerships, Notes, DC, de-, carefully drawn up
OFFICE-At the store of Hornsby & Flick direct
y opposite the Emporia Hotel, Emporia, Kanzas.
july4-3m
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
FIGURING MILLS.
E. H. PEN DLETON co..
MANUFACTURERS OF
Forsman's Grinding and Bolting Custom
or Merchant FIGURING Mills,

U1 Mo1C1LdHG E1UlIIIHS MILLS,
AND THE CELEBRATED
Double Action Steel Wire Cloth Flour Bolt
MILLS with two pair of Burrs 80 inch. Diane
vi ter Conveyors, Elevators and Bolts, all ready
for use, occupy feet long feet wide, feet high
S VIII Rd a and n5 9ot SOO bushels per day. making
than other Mills. Will grind any kind of Grain;
upper Stone runs, can be run 600 times; whole
Mill weighs 5000 lbs. Cost $1,000.
Mills of any number and size of Burrs, with or
without Bolt made to order.
Bolts that will bolt from 100 to $50 bbls of Flour
per day occupy from to 10 feet long, from 3 to
81 feet wide, and 4 to AZ feet high. Cost sepa-
rately from Mills, from S325 to $500.
Factory, East Front Street, one square above the
Water Works.
I DOfiee, No. 25 Pearl street, Cincinnati, Ohio.
PLUMB d McCLUNG, Agents,
june6-6m Emporia, Kanzas.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

AMUsEAENT.-A plain-spoken woman
lately visited married woman, and said to
her:
sHoH do you contrive 10 amuse vourself?'
'sAmusel" said the other, staring; edo
you know I have my housework to do ?''
s.Yes,'' was the answer, al see you have
It to do; but as it is never done, / conclude
you must have some other way of passing
your fime''
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
JAMES TODD.
cam Engine Builder and Haehinisf

MANUFACTURER of EoYEs' NV IxpRovED
w PLsSIse MAcHISE, On Iron and Wood Frames,
for Tongneing. Growing Flooring, and any other
kind of lumber. Also-Sash, MuIey and Circular
Saw Mills, and Mil work ralIy-Portable Germ
and FIGURING dIlls, Horse Powers; Cotton, Hay,
lard, Tobaeco and Wine Screws. Cast mrs
of every description, furnished to order Stock
Mills, for Cutting and Grinding Corn and Cob.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
LAND AGENCY,

z@ AT EMPOR1A, kANZAS
u s H. e. HUNT, will attend promptly
Il to all business entrusted to their care viii
dispose of Land Warrants, make investments in
Indian Trust Lands, buy and sell City Lots and
Shares, buy and sell claims.
REFERENcEs:-Tmner Sampson, Lawrence: ].
II. Lane, Doniphan; ". Probasco, Cincinnati; ]
G. Wright. Indianapolis; Gamaliel Scott, Colum-
bus. june6-tf
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
STRAYEDf 8

4 DARKBAY STALLION PONY, marked by
"A q bushy name, white face, and by bullet
hole in the left side Of the neck, which can be dis
tinctly felt by passing the hand along the neck
liberal reward viii be given for any infcrma-
ton which viii enable me to procure him, or for
his delivery here. JAMES H HOLMES.
ETnnnria June 9Th ,57- II
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

ssCharlie, my boy, why do you stand
there?" said an over-anxious mother TO her
son at fashionable party; ego in and en-
JOY yourself. You look ike a statue
There's Miss J.-she's splendid creature
plump as partridge; shall l introduce
you?''
ssNo, thank We. saw the lady in ba-
thing at Nahant last summer. Excuse me- .
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
ADVERTISEMENTS
BLAcKsMIrHING

j.. B. COX,
"AVING established himself in the above
IL business at Emperia, would announce to the
people of the surrounding country that he is fully
prepared to do all manner of work in his line of
business, in the best manner. He fatters himself
that with his long experience at the business he
viii be able to give the fullest satisfaction to all
who may favor him with their patronage. His
prices Will be reasonable.
Emporia, August l, 1S51.-f
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

s.WosDERFrLs THINGS are done now-a-
daysn said Mr. Timmins: 'sThe doctor
has given Flack,s boy a new Lip from his
cheek, ssAh,' said his lady, many s
the time I have known pair taken from
mine. and no very painful operation either. !"
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

"Ahp' said an .Englishman. 81 belong to
country upon which the sun never sets"
.tAnd L." said Yankee, ''belong TO a
country of which there is no correct map;
it grows so fast that surveyors can't keep up
with it."
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

my son. how could you marry an Irish
girl?'' t.Why, father, I'm not able to keep
two women If 1 had married Yankee
girI I'd been obliged 10 hire an irish girl to
take care of her.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Alta PARry.-An English paper gives
an account of q tea party of sixty old wo-
men, who were the mothers of eight hun
dred and sixty mine children They must
have had something to talk about at that tea
party.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

A subscriber writes to an American edi-
tor in the West: . don't wsnt your paper
any longer 70 which the editor replied !:
81 vouIdn't naake it any longer if yon did:
its present length suits me very well.''
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
LEGAL WRITIEG.

" e are prepared to draw up all manner Of
w Forms for Contracts, Copartnership, Con-
yeyanees. Bills of Sale, Leases, Warranty and
Mortgage Deeds, Chattel Mortgages, Notes, de-,
cases, and Declarations filed IN the Registers OF
fee. Liune6:fsl - PLuAB d HcCLUNG
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
BURLINGAM HnnsE.

BURIIsGAarE, iLATE COUNCIL CITY KAxzAs.
GEORGE BRATTON. Proprietor.
This House is now open for the reception Of
Travellers and Boarders- Terms reasonable.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

CoS.-Why is a hungry boy, looking at
the pudding in eooS-shop window, like a
wild horsa9
Because he would be ali the better if be
had bit In his mouth.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

An Irishman's description of making a
cannon: 'sTake long hole and pour brass
around it''
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Daddy said joker, ..why don't you
get your ears cropped-they are entirely too
long for Inan?''
'.And yours. replied Pat, fought to be
lengthened- they are too short for an ass
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

.-I sAE, Jimmy, did you ever see such a
summer as this same ?''
.'Faith an I have
when 90
Last winter, be jabers'
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
W. WOODWARD. IA.
CITY DRUG STORE,

b " o a.
CITY DRUG STORE,
Wo0dWard,s Block, Lawrence, Kanzas.
WOODWAR FINLFY.
wHoLEsARE AND RETAIL DEALERS IN
nRUGS, PATENT MEDICINES, PAINTS,
~ Oils and Varnishes, Window Glass and Glass
ware, Brushes, Perfumeries, Fancy and Toilet
Articles, Fine Brandies, Wine, de-, for Medicinal
Purposes. Also-Books, Stationery, Periodicals.
Sheet Music, dc, DE.
Country dealers, Physicians, and all others are
invited TO call and examine our stock, which they
will find the largest and best assorted in this Ter
ntory, all of which will be sold on the most ibe-
raj terms All orders promptly attended to.
iu0G-tf
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
g. MN WALkER,
surveyor and Civil Engineer,

LasoFeFce T0ad, Jour niles from Eal30rie, kaazas
Is prepared with superior instruments TO Law ont
town SITES, do plain surveying, leveIli ng mapping
and draughting. Bridge Plans and Bills made to
order. iuiyis4f
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Tinware of all Kinds.
I HAVE large stock of Tinware for sale at nv
Il new store in Emporia. N s. STORRS
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
4 western Pee. 1w,itnessed a pu.giIisticI en-

n WesIeTiI poet HItnesoed pllSIIisilc en-
counter, which he thus inmortalized
And Isse pitched into him
And hym pitched into he:
The way they fytte It was sin.
And horrible 10 see
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
Tusuraf Z

TNHE undersigned is Agent for the Union Insu-
Il rance Co., of ofJamestOwn. Pa, and is ready to
effect Insurance against loss or damage by Fire,
Lightning, Tornado and Hail, on Buildings GRAIN
Cattle and Horses. P. B. PLUMB,
nl-1y .EMPoRIA.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
Steam Fire Engines.

MILL MACHINERY, PRINTING PRESSES,
1YI Iron Fronts, Columns, Cutters, Conductors,
Window Lintels and SiIls, Moving Machines,
fhreshers. and Little Giant Corn Mills, furnished
to order by ALLEN & GILMORE,
Cor. Mass. d Winthrop sts., Lawrence
june6-iy. s.-.--.s
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Lawrence Stove and Hardware Store!
Corner Massachusetts and Wiazhrop Sts,
LAWRENCE, KANZAS.
NE have just received several hundred Stoces,
Wv embracing all the latest and best patterns.
Also, 8 large and complete stock of Hardware, Me-
chanies' Tools, and Agricultural Implements
Merchants and others supplied at Saint Louis pri-
ces, adding transportation. Terms Cash.
june6-ly ALLEN & GILMORE. 2
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
LEIGH M'CLUYG
B. PLUME LEIGH II CLC,
PLUMB s. M.CLUNG,
REAL ESTATE AGENTS,

EMPORIA, KANZAS.
VIII attend promptly to the purchase and sale of
Real Estate in any portion of KaLSas.
REFER To-Hon. c. S. Hamilton, Marysville
Ohio; Hon. NJ d. Catch, Xenia Ohio; W. " Ross,
Ed. Tribune, Topeka, Kanzas; G. W. Brown, Ed.
Herald, Lawrence, Kanzas. iune6-tf
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
E. p. BANCROFT,
REGISTER OF DEEDS, REAL ESTATE

EMPORIA, KANZAS
City Lots, Shares in Towns, Claims bought and
sold, Legal Papers drawn and Collections made
To PRE-EMProRsI have full instructions with
regard to the right of presumption, from the Gen
eral Land Office, together with the rules in con-
tested cases. Blank Declarations on hand at all
times, which will be filled up and forwarded on
short notice. [nItfl E. ?. BANCROFT.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
LAND AGENT,

Z a q " AG e 3
+ John 3. WOOD, respectfully gives notice
e3 that he continues TO carry on the Land Agency
business at Lawrence, Kanzns Territory. All bu-
siness entrusted to him shall be attended to with
fidelity and dispatch. -
Lawrence June 6-3ms
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
Land in 0hinI

000 ACRES valuable land in Shelby County,
OAO Ohio, will be exchanged for property in
kanzas. go
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Emporia Shares for sale
PLUMB & McCLUNG,
june6-d Emporia.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08
DRY Goods and Groceries,

nj S. sToRRS would give notice to those in
IN. terested that he has just opened in Emporia
Sash and Clothing. which he Will sell cheap for
cash June 6, '57-tf.
The Kanzas news., 1857-08-08

Flour and Bacon.
LNLOUR and Bacon for sale in Emporia by
= je6 N. s. STORRS.