Delaware weekly Republican. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1841-188?, 1857-03-12

PAT.-Pat was hungry, and got out of the
cars for his rcireshment. Z he cars very Thought
| lessly went on without him. Pats ire was up.
"You spapeenI' he cried starting on run,
and shaking his fist as he few after the ira in.
"otop, there ye old stame-wagin; ye murther-
u, stane englne-ye'ye got passenger aboard
that's left behind !"
The ''stame-wagn'' was relentless, and the
passenger ''aboard" that was ssleft behind -
had to stay-behind.
''Sambo, 'spose dere is six chickens in
dere left ?''
| "What time OBJ day was it p,
'SWhat had dat got to do wild 1t Z"
| GA good deal. If it was after dark, dere
would be none left, dat, is, If you happened to
be along dat ways
'.Lool heali, nigga, stop dem personalities,
or l'll shove a Trick at dat head OBJ yourn"
cross-grained, antiqnated maiden vlxin
went to physician for advice.
''Madam, said the doctor, it seems to me, it
would do you good to have little sun and
air.
son you abominable, nasty critter a
and heir. Oh, dear-oh, dear-somebody fl
me. 'haH 60 or the outrageoE brute |
The old maid vamo,sa, ana has poen seen
since.
The head clerk Of large merdantils house
was Dragging rather largely Of the amount of
the annual business done by his ssfir1n.D
"fou may judge of its extent" said he
"when tell you that the quilts for our cor
respondence only, cost two thousand sd@llars a
year %
"Poohl' said the clerk of another house
who was setting byi s'what is that to our cor
respondencc, when we save four thousand dol
lars year in ink, from merely emitting to'dot
the i's''
New Toll RATEs.-A sleigh-load of buxom
feminines, passing lately through the Toll Gate
on the Bloomfield Turnpike, who told the gate
keeper that they had no money, but that he
might take his toll in kisses. But taint of
heart, notwithstanding the ladies gave him
every opportunity, he declined tasting the nee
tar of their lips, and through they went gratis.
If this kind Of coin becomes alawlul tender, the
tush for situations as toll-gate keeuers will ex-
coed that for tide-waiterships. Half the un-
employed bachelors Of the country will be at
ter them.
We heard Of good joke perpetrated the
other day by a friend of ours. Said he to an
acquaintance:
''Things are really coming to pretty pass
in our city-al the ladies stopping at the AS
| tor, left the dinner table yesterday"
''Possible ' said the person to whom tho
remark was addressed, greatly surprised -
''What caused them to do ~
"Why," responded our friend convincing
himself that the coast was clear, s'they had
finished eating"
pass was made at him, but he lodged it.
HooPs.-One ofthe best things we have yet
seen on hoops, is the following from the Prai-
rie (Miss.) NeiGs, in the form Of a question put
by gentleman who had just returned home
after years absence in Nicaragua
On his way up from the landing, he met quite
a number of ladies, After kissing his sister,
&C., he said:
SPRAY, are all the girls in Aberdeen mar
ried l met Miss A."
'.Why, brother, Miss A--isn't mar
''Not married 20
"Nor Miss B9 Nor Miss C-2
Nor Miss D----l nor Miss''-s'Oh, pshaw!
BROTHER" said Sis, just beginning to catch tho
idea, ''that's nothing but hoepsw
AVERY IMPORTANT MATTER.-The New York
Tribune, alluding to the statement giving TO tho
world the rery importaut fletthat Mr.. Buchan-
ans Inauguration coat was made by a Dutch
tailor at Lancaster, and, furthermore, that il is
lined with black satin, and, above all, that Hthe
stitching represents the thirty-one States in
stars, with the Keystone in the CENTRE"
says
awe think that after this information Sartor
Resartus himself would declare that the Lancas
ter Dutch tailor aforesaid had saved the Union.
moderation what can We need more2 We have
heard OF many coats, of Jacobs coat, of the
holy coat of Treves, and now of DIR. Buchanan's
coat. What interests us most is whether or not
MIR. Thimblewell, Of Lancaster, has made the
coat of cloth which it will do to turn. Other
coats of Mr.. Buchanan have served that useful
purpose. and, at his time of life, he oughtnot to
change his STYLE"
Wrecks IN THE OaIo RrvER.-The shores
the Ohio, between Pttshurg, Pa, and Kama
wha, Va. are said to be pretty well strewn with
wrecks of ii ttbodts, brges, coal flats, lumber
boats, &c, lying high and dry, from tine etf cts
of the late treshets and the disruption of the
ice.
FRAcAs IN Scuool.-A teacher in one of
tho Cincinnati Public Schools, having chas'
tised male papil, the boys mother, large
robust woman, accompanied by two men to as
sist her, went into the school and attempted to
4 cOwhds the pedigogue, who was small, deli
cate young man. She was arrested and taken
| to the watch house. The teacher was badl
/ cut about the face