The Feliciana Democrat., 1857-12-05
Tbs fslitiana 1emotrat.
ROMANCE OF REAL LIFE

ROMANCE OF REAL LIFE.
There was a fine old general once who, hav-
ing spent most of his life in the field OF Mars,
knew very little about the camp OF cupid lie
was one of those rough and honest spirits often
met with in his gallant profession innocent
ms an infant of almost everything save high
integrity and ndomitabe bravery He was
nearly ffty wears old, and his tolls were over
when master Dan brought him acquainted with
a widow Wadman, in whose eye he began to
detect something that made him feel uneasy.
Here was the result Of leisure.
At length, however, the blunt honesty OF
his disposition rose uppermost among his con
nicting plans and his course was chosen. At
school he had once studied "Othello's defense
TO recite at an exhibition but made Il failure
he now recollected there was something in this
defense to recite, very much like what he want
cd to saw He got the book Immediately,
found the passage clapped on his hat with II
determined air, and posted oil to the widow
Wadman's with Shakespeare under his arm.
"Madam," said General Uncle Toby, open
ING his book at the marked place, with the
solemnty of special pleadcr at the bar
Madam
Rude am in my speech.
And little blessd with the set phrase OF peace
For since these arms Of mine had seven years pith
Till now some nine moons wasted they have used
Their dearest action in the tented field
And little this great world can speak.
More than pertains to icats of broil and battle:
And therefore =
Here the General closed the book, wiped
his forehead looked up at the ceiling, and said
with a spasmodic gasp, Il want to get mar
ried ~
The widow laughed for ten minutes by the
watch before she could utter syllable, and
then she said, with precious tears OF humol
rolling down her goodnaturcd checks. And
who is it YOU want to marry, General!
"You," said Uncle Toby, flourishing his
sword.arm in the air, and assuming military
attitude of defiance, as if he expected an assault
from the widow Immediately
"Will you kill me if marry YOU" said
the widow with merry twinkle in her eye.
"No, madam !" replied Uncle Toby, in u
most serious and deprccating, tone, as il to
assure her that such ali idea had never enter
cd his head
"Well, thcn ! guess III marry you" said
the widow.
THANK you ma'am," said Uncle Toby
"but one thing am bound to tell you-l
The widow started, remained silent moment
and then went into longer louder, and mcr.lci
laugh than she had indulged III before, at the
end of which she drew her seat nearer the
General, gravcly laid her hand on his head
gently lifted his wig off and placed it on the
table
General Uncle Toby had never known feal
in hot battle, but lie now felt decisive incli
nation to run away. The widow laughed
again as though she never would stop, and th'
General was about to lay his hat upon hi
dcnuded head and bolt, when the Faction
lady placed her hand upon his arm and dc
tained him. She then deliberately raised he
other hand to her own head with sort 0
military precision, executed a rapid man~nvr
with her five fingers, pulled off her whole hea'
of fine glossy hair, and placed it upon the ia
bic by the side Of the Generals, Remained
seated with ludcrous gravity in front OF he
accepted lover, quite bald
AS may be expected Uncle Toby now laugh
ed along with the widow, and they soon grew
so merry OYER the affair that the maid seryan
peeped through the key-holc at the noise an
saw the old couple dancing jig and bobbln
their bald patcs at each other like pair o
Chinese Mandarns. So the two very shortl
laid their heads together upon the pillow c
matrimony.
n1F. "NIy wife sDjd a War the other day