Kenosha tribune & telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1856-1859, 1857-10-22
KENosHA WIS, THURSDAY. OCTOBER g. 1857
Mr.. Clifton is so kind, so very kind to me, and

ri Mr. Clifton is so kind, so very kind to me- an,
:, | I am to be his wife-his wife
el How little dreamed of that on the evening
Y when he first came to us / have dreamed so lit
i tie of late, my dreaming days are over, neet
J. in the love of the one who has chosen me to bt
IT | his wife.
July 9-How calm and quiet was when
h wrote those last lines | remember now, when
k | laid down my pen, / sat and looked up at the
e peaceful stars and thought of the peaceful life
n was to lead with Mr.. Clifton, and thanked God
' FIR making me so happy. God, help me now!
q | have not dared to write here for many days
e not dared to own to myself what feared but
g tits 50 dreary to keep this secret shut up in my
{ heart must write it. ] will write it out plain
ly just as it is. cannot dress it up to hide its
e terror.
VI Hove Harry Dalton love him as / never
, dreamed could love till now. l. the promised
o wife of Mr.. Clifton, love his nephew. God knows
e that when / promised to marry Mr.. Clifton
e thought loved him as wife should love him; as
a wife should love her husband. i never thought
that there was a love more intense, more earnest
; which might one day feel. knew loved him
AS indeed do now-and so 1 told him would
0 be his wife. And will be, oh yes, win be
/, his wife, but then it will not be as thought i:
I would should not, shall not rest peacefully
and happily in his love, and long for nothing
more.
Oh, Harry, Harry, why did you come here /!
! The quiet stars look down on me tonight as
; when l wrote the last record in my journal, but
they bring no peace TO my heart, my poor, ach-
ing, tired heart. Why, am almost plying my
, seit Well. there is no one else but God, and
perhaps the angels and stars, TO pity me.
! July M-Another week of misery-Harry is
here every day and almost all the time. To-day
ne and walked together through the woods to
| meet Nav who W. of tho Clan Z In liz,
afternoon, a dreamy summers day, and the glad
sunlight crept through the thick green leaves of
the Trees to play about our heads A little breeze
was cooling my hot face and lifting Harry's curls
the birds were singing mad, wild songs of joy
but my heart was heavy and sad. ,
We were both very still and quiet. / could
not talk it tired me, and Harry, his beautiful face
upturned to catch the breeze said little; a thought
Fl had been stealing over ME for a day or two, and
my mind was full of it now. feared that Harry
loved me, and knew how much, much harder
f my trial would be if this so, and yet could
not help being glad when | thought it was true.
But now l know it Harry loves me While
walking to-day we came to a falle tree, and as
| was about to step over it Harry lifted me over
in his arms then held me moment looking down
into my face with his eyes full of tender, longing
love, and he said, Ruth do you really love my
uncle | trembled-oh 1t was hard in him to try
me so-but answered firmly, Yes, love him
He put me away from him then and turned away
walked on alone for few steps, his head bent
low, his hands clasping each other tight y.
! Then he turned to me again. and his face was
calm, his voice firm, as he said
I hope you WILDE very happy with him, Ruth
he loves you. If you are happy, am content
He walked on again silently till we met May,
her face flushed with walking, her eyelids droop-
ing, coming slyly toward us. She is always shy
with Harry ! don't know how | could be SO
calm. but strength was given me, and did not
show him by word or look that my heart was all
his. Harry, Harry, you must not know | love
you-that is so hard My heart, my heart
July 18Th, morRing-lt is all all over; | will
try to write it as it happened, but can not think
well TO night. forget There is such a terrible
pain in my head and l am So, so hot To-day
Harry rode over here usual. May ana
were sitting in the back parlor with Mr.. Clifton
when he came in He asked us all to so with
HIM to the Glen in search of strawberries. May
shall 60 l said, but am too busy; will you goi
; aad turned to Mr.. Clifton NO, he answered
smiling, we will stay here and finish our book.
!, So May went Off with Harry, and J staid with
, Mr.. Clifton who read TO me az l slowed / could
not isten forgot he was reading, and drop
ped my work to look dreamily out OF the window.
: Looking up from his book Mr.. Clifton said,
Ruth, am keeping you here this pleasant day2
Now away after the young folks, know
you are longing to- No, no. l said, laying my
hand on his and looking up into his face indeed
had far rather stay here with you He looked
pleased, but said, i wish You to go Ruth, it will
do You good; have letters to write in my room
So he turned away without needing any thing l
said. But before he left the room he stopped,
and looking earnestly in my face said Bless you
for your love, my child, it has made me very
} happy
He went away, and bowed my head upon
my hands and cried: | moaned out, God for
give me that my heart is not all yours, my kind
est, best friend. But cannot love you as your
promised wife should love. o God help me
A hand was laid upon my shoulder; l raised
my head, and Harry Dalton stood beside me-
His face was very pale, MS lips quivered as
with strong emotion.
Ruth, Ruth, he said, must speak to you
! heard what you just said, and now / feel that
am free to speak.
''Oh Ruth, need not tell you that love you
You know that, and you know too why have
not before tod you of my love; but now when
have heard your own lips say that you do not
love my uncle as a wife should love her husband
l may tell you all. Ruth, Ruth, you will not be
his wife; you will love Inc now; tell me SO, dar-
ling" His inexpressibly tender, loving voice
thrilled me, but was firm. Harry / said,
/ "this must not be you must not tell me of a
love which never can accept; am the affianced
wife fyour uncle" "But You do n)t love him,
he pleaded Hush, hush, let those words be as
if had never spoken them. | have promised
to be Mr. Clittons wife. and l will be true to
him God helping me, will make him a faith
| full, loving wife
Ruth, this is cruel, for you love me-yOu can
not hide it
started then said, Harry, Who is cruel
now7'
! Forgive me- Ruth, but am almost mad
i Tell me you love me say it, darling and then
he poured forth such passionate words as would
have frightened me month ago. but now /
| understand them well, and the only answer |
could give him-him who had my whole, whole
heart-was cannot marry you; am to be Mr..
i Cfton's wife
Then at last he said. you do not love me
know it now. All, thought you did and
that helped NE, but now must go away, but
suddenly came back, took my hands in his, and
drawing me to him, aimed hot kisses on my brow.
then IN an instant was gone. He had just rid
den from the door. Harry, my own Harry, for
you are mine-does not my love make you so 2
Ereaiag.-Just as finished writing the last
sentence the door of my room opened and May
burst in. She ran to me, and hiding her face in
my lap, scbbed bitterly
May, May. what is it cried anxiousIy.
!, oh, Ruth. you have sent him away He has
gone, gone forever =
May, dear, what are you talking off,
She only replied by moaning again and again.
Harry has gone, gone = Then she suddenly
looked up and said Why did you take his love
from me, and then break his heart You had
your choice, why take mine 2
Yours May, May and looked eagerly in
to her face, now covered with bushes do you
love him Tell me, do you love Harry DaltOn7'
Don't don't, and she shrank from my quick
questioning. 1T hurts me to have you speak of
it so. have scarcely thought of it myself till
now-d0n't talk of it. what do you know of
such love as mine-you and cold Mr. Clifton 2
Il could not help it; Icried out with wall.
ing cry, oh, May love Harry too God help
US both :
She did not say one word she understood it
all, and creeping to my bosom she lay sobbing