Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1857-12-23
A Happy Burlesque.

/ If Matt Peel, of the counterfeit darkey frater
nifty, had been upon the levee yesterday be
might have got happy wrinkle in his line from
the performances, of the genuine colored gentry,
1.-THE carte for this entertainment was a burlesque
auction sale. One of the darkey men, selected
for his tonguey qualities, mounted box, and IL
good set auctloneer phrase, announced to large
assemblage of idle negro aborers that he was
now about to offer them, for cash, ito de highs
bidder in dis crowd, afus rate boy, A /, SCUM
an healty, an warranted not to cut in de eye,
bak in de step, nor steal chickens dat don't long
to him also 'ditonal dis boy wars only one par
shoes year. an dey's good at de eend of il,
takes keer his close particuler, an neber goes
cortin' don't 60 to sleep ober his work. Inspect
fnl an 'bedent; is six foot tree inches high,
weighs two hundred an twenty pouns, an can
do more work n house or fiel' dan any oder two
nggers; sides he eat less dan any other one mig
ger. Step up hyar, Sam, an show yourself to
desc gemmen! Libely now! Der he is, gem
men 'Mire him for yourselves % -
And thetssble anctioneer pointed with triuni-
phant gesture to the subject of extravagant euo-
gium-a scrubby, knotty, runted gray headed
specimen Of field hand about four feet and q halt
high, who mounted the box beside him, amid
vast roars of laughter from the crowd.
"Dar he is, gemmen canine him an start
him at sufin, for he mus be sole! What does
you say2" Several colored gemmen mounted
the stand and proceeded to canine" him. One
violently 2nlled his mouth open and reported
''dIs ngger not sound-one jaw toof doone gone"
Another tried to straighten out lock of his
wool, with don't like dis-har kink too much
--nigger lazy!" Another pretended to discov-(
er something besides ideas running through his
WOOL and concluded "nigger's head too pop'u-
lar"-(populous.) Another said ''Digger's foot
too long an slim-long foot niger will steal and
run away long foot niger amt wort Jail fees"
Another "nigger's toe-nails too long-scratch
paint Off my parlor floor. No wants dis mig
ger Yah! Fly ah Yah! Yah
swell, gelnmen is you done looking at dat
ngger9 Is you satisfy2 He's prime lot!-|
What do you say for the boy2 Start him at
suffin He's got to be prumptory sale!"
"Ten cent?" came from the laughing crowd.
"Ten cent Item centl-Going at ten cent--ten
-ten-ten." ,per. se-. a5f
Zone dime" from the crowd. "Tank you sar
One dime, one dime, one dime-go.in' at one
dime-d-i-m-e! Too bad, gemmen, make me
sacfze dis artikel dat wayl Say 'leben1' .a
"One bit" from the crowd. "Much 'blged
sar! one bit-one bit-one bt-bit-bit-bit-l
bit-goin'-goin'-won't nobody say 'leben for
dis A /, warranted" &C., "boy goin' at one bit
i-n'-gone at ten cent Yours, sar,
an dog sight more dan he's worf!" And he
knocked down" the property to the quasi pur-
chaser with q tremendous blow ON the head with
a barrel stave he used as ''hammer," which
broke in the middle, and "knocked down" the
sold party off the box without his apparently
feeling the blow. so massive was the conforma-
ton of his Uranium. That was the greatest auc-
tion sale that ever we saw.-1rue Delta.