davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09
Gbe Kansas Chief,
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SOL. MILLER, Editor and Proprietor,
WHITE CLOUD, KANsAs.
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White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A SPECULATION CURED.-Once on a
time country Dutchman early one morn
ing went to town, where by chance he
overheard some traders telling each other
how much money they had made that
morning by speculations one Of them
had made 800. 5000, $500, &c. Hans
bump of acGrisitiveness was so excited
that he. uithOut any reflection, forthwith
concluded to leave his former business.
which was labor, and try his hand at
speculation, and on his return home made
his Intentions known to his faithful vrow.
Early next morning he gathered his wal
let containing his funds. amounting to
five dollars. and OF he goes post haste
and half bent. to look mp speculation.
He hal not proceeded far when he met
wagner. AMI accosted him thus
Good morning. Mr.. Wagner. l
wants to speculate leetle dish NORMA
wild you." well, say" said the wag-
oner. show do you want to speculate 90
Vel" gays the Dutchman, Il will pet
yon fife dollars lyon can't guess what my
tog's name is" "Call him up till / look
at him." rejoined the wagner. Dutch
man: Here Watch. here Watch. here
Watch" The dog trots mp, the WAGNER
eyes him for a moment and said, Il
guess his name is Watch" Du:chman !;
20 besure Mr. Wagner, you has won
him. de monish is yours" and Hans re-
turned to his old occupation, perfectly
satisfied.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A LIBRARY OF PERFECT BR1cKs.-Col.
Rawlinson has inst discovered, among
the ruins Of ancient Babylon. an extensive
library-not. indeed. printed on paper.
but impressed on baked hricks--rOntain
ing many and voluminous treatises on
astronomy. mathematics. and ornithoIo-
gy, and several other most important
branches of knowledge. These treatises
contain facts and arguments. which, in
his opinion. will have no small operation
on the study Of sciences to which they
relate. and which throw great light on
Biblical history and criticism, and the
history of orr race.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

BEWARE OF LUcIFER MATcHEs.-A
German paper relates the following: Two
men entering a tavern in Cambria.
France. recently. ordered some coffee. and
after drinking the first cup. both dropped
dead. The landlady called the police /;
they talked of poisoning. "How is it
possihle?" exclaimed the landlady; "they
only drank one cup of coffee. and that
could not have hurt them" Thus say
ing. to prove the harmlessness of It. she
herself drank a cup. Hardly having par
taken of this. she dropped down dead too.
On examining the coffee pot. they found
a packet of Lucifer matches at the bottom
of It'll
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

The Court in session, the Judges are on
the bench, and the case of Smith VS.,
Brown is called up.
"All ready !" shouts the counsel for
defendant, but the council for the plain
tiff does not respond.
"Who's for the PLAINTIFF" inquiries the
judge somewhat impatiently.
"May it please the court, said rising
member of the legal fraternity, "Pikins
is for the plaintiff, but l left him Just
now, over in the tavern. playing game
of poker. He's got a sucker there, and
he'll be sure to skin him, if he only has
time. He's got the thing all set to ring
in "cold deck" in which case he will
deal for himself four aces. opponent four
queens, so that your honor will perceive,
he must rake the persimmons.'
The look Of Impotence vanished from
the face of his honor at once, and an ex-
preston more Of sorrow than of anger
took its place At length he said with a
sigh:
"Dear me, that's TOO bad! 1t happens
at very unfortunate time, as l am
very anxious to get on with these cases. -
A brown study followed, and at length
a happy itlea struck the Judge.
"Bill" said he. addressing the friend
of the absent Pikins, who had spoken,
Il believe you understand poker about as
well as Pikins does; suppose you go over
and play his hand"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A MARSHAL OF THE UNITED STATES -
Among the Americans wqo attended the
late ball given at the Hotel dc Vile,
Paris, was Jack Spicer, of Kentucky
Jack rushed the dress somewhat strong,
and sported epauletfes on his shoulders
large enough to start four Major Gener-
ais in business. Jack was the observed
of all observers, and got mixed up with
aparty that his friends could not account
for. Wherever the marshals sat down,
Jack did the same, always taking the
post Of honor. The day after the ball
Jack called on his old acquaintance, Mr..
Mason, our Minister to France, who start
ed ND a little conversation in the follow
ing manner:
Il hear. Jack, you were at the ball
last night ?"
al was; sir, and had high old time I"
"For which You are indebted, 1 sup
pose, to the high old company you got
mixed up with? BY the way, how
came you associated with the ntarshals?"
"How by virtue Of nay ofi@-they
were marshals of France, while l am
nothing else than marshal of the Repub-
lie. ] showed my commission and took
post accordingly"
"By right Of Office, what do you
mean ?"
aRead that and see.
Here Jack presented Mr.. Mason with
. whitley brown paper, with seal big
enough for four pound weight.
ssWhat in the name Of Heaven is this?"
s.My commission of marshall re-
eeivei It in 1850. when l assisted in TAX
ing the census in Frankfort"
ssYou don't mean to say that you travel
On this ?"
81 don't mean anything else. That
mslres me 9 marshal of the Republic.
and I intend to have the Office duly
honored."
Mr.. Mason allowed that Jack was
doing large business on very small
capital. We should not wonder if the
reader did the same. A census marshal
of Frankfort mixing in with the ma7shals
Of France is certainly rushing matters in
. manner that requires as much brass as
epaulettes. Jack, we are happy to say,
IS equal to the requirements.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

TAXING DowS JUDGE.-One Of the
old fashioned attorneys practising in In
diana. insisted on arguing case bef,re
Jndse B.. after it hal been decided
Judge r. repeatedly told the unfortunate
attorney that he would listen to no fur
thar argument in the case "Bnt NAV It
please your honor" SAYS the advocate.
'your honor viii certainly hear an
argument if vour honor has decided
wrong?" NO" replied the Judge. "if
Won argue the case any more. take it to
the Cont Of Errors" NAV it please
vour honor. 7 don't see where in the
devil I'd go to. for If this amt Court
of Errors, l don't know where to find
one.'
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A RECIPE WORTH so HoRsEs-CURE
FOR TIVE BoTs.-When your horse las
the bots. first give him some sage tea /;
boil the sage in quart Of sweet milk,
and sweetened with molasses. Half an
hour after. dreneh your horse with two
ounce walls of laudanum; in three quar-
tiers Of an hour after, dreneh with three
fonrths of fb. of salts. and your horse
will be well in three hours, or as soon as
the salts operate. The tea viii make the
bots let loose, the laudanum will put
them to sleep. and the salts win cause
them to pass from your horse. Warrant
the cure, if a fair trial
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09
asefllI anS Guriuus,

WIT AN ELEMENT OF GRRArNEss.-
Men often regard wit as kiHd of vulgar
endowment. 1t is associated in their
minds with frivOlity and low jesting. and
they wonder that any one Of genius and
character can steop to such trihing amuse-
meats. Such opinions are ill-founded,
and must be revoked, when one takes
larger and more accurate survey of hu-
man character. Sidney Smith says with
truth:
Almost all the great poets, orators,
and statesmen Of all times have been wit
ty. Caesar, Alexander, Aristotle, Des-
cartes. and Lord Bacon, were witty men:
so were Cicero. Shakespeare, DemoSthenes,
Boileau, Pope. Dryden. Fontenelle. John
son, Waller. Cowley, Soloa. Socrates,
and almost every man who has made a
distinguished figure in the House of Com
mons. The meaning Of an extraordinary
man is. that ne is eight men, not one man;
that he has as much wit as If he had no
sense, and as much sense as If he had no
wit that his conduct is as iudieious as
il he were the dulleSt Of human beings,
and MS imagination as brilliant as if he
were irretrievably ruined. But when wit
is combined with sense and information /;
when it is softened by benevolence, and
restrained by strong principle; when it is
in the hands Of a man who can use it and
despise 1t; who can be witty, and some
thing much better than witty; who loves
honor, justice, decency. good-nature. mo-
rality and religion. ten Thousand times
better than wit; wit is then beautiful
and delightful part Of our nature
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

THE SMILES OF PRovrDENcE.-"The
best thing have heard" writes j. II. L.,
ain disqualification of the saying, PRO
violence smiled on me-" heard Dutch
man give. Urn give it to you in En-
Rlish; you. being Knickerbocker, must
put the polish on "Have You got
through harvest, Hans? Yes, me and
nv boys worked like the devil all the
fine. very hard, had somuch to do, did
net know as we would get through be-
fore winter; but we did" Providence
smiled on you r. "Why. you see he
ius. blasssd about forty or fffy acres of
nv wheat, so that it was not worth
rospine, and SO, you see, we have Just
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

ASEcpofR or METHUsELAH.-I. is writ.
ten in quaint old Jewish manuscript,
now in the British Museum. that the old
est Of mankind was Methuselah. but he
did not live as long a. he might have
done The writer says that God prom
ised him. in a dreatn. that If he would
rise I'm and build him a house. his life
should Be prolonged FIVE hundred years;
but he replied that it was scarcely worth
while to build house for so short pc
Rod. and so he died before hs was thou
sand years old.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

MILK AN ARTICLE OF FooD. NOT a
MERE BEvERAeE.-This has been deter
mined legally the other day. by the
Court of Cessation. in Paris, and its de-
cision is in accordance with sound physi-
illogical principles. After this. the per-
son who adulterates milk, no longer COM
mits simple contravention of the acts
of the police, with penalty of Is francs
fine. and imprisonment of frcm "a hours
to 8 DAYS; he may now be found guilty
of misdemeanor. and punished with a
fine of so francs, and inn risonment Of
from three months to a Gazette
des Hopsitaur.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

PoTAToEs.-Potatoes were carried from
Virginia in 1856. and first cultivated in
Ireland. upon the estate of Sir Walter
Raleigh. At first AMI for long time,
it is said the tubers were treated as fruit,
being eaten with sugar or baked in pies,
with wine and spices. They csme very
slowly and through much opposition into
popular use, but have now won their way
to prominent place--in fact the most
prominent-among the roots cultivated
for human subsistence
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

CoNPARATIvEs. - A metallic pocket
piece is a watch. but person who tends
a sick man through the night is a watcher.
A number of persons or objects in q
straight line form a row. but q person
who pulls a boat is a rover
The refuse portion of fax when It is
dressed is tow. hut man under the in
fluence Of brandy is ''tore."
The gent who gallants the ladies is a
bean, but when his attentions become
irksome he is bore.
CONCEALED Atmospheric vapor is snow.
Int the noise produced by an asthmatic
sleeper is a snore-
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Warns on HoRsEs.-A correspondent
OF the Country Gentleman, says: ! had
horse which had wart on one of his
fore legs. Iapplied ligature. and in a
few days it came off, and appeared to be
Cured; but it soon began to grow again,
and in few months became as large as
hens egg. and eventually q running sore.
l again removed it with ligature, and
applied nitrate of silver lunar canstic)
to the wound, at intervals oftwo or three
days, when it healed mp and / had no
further trouble with it."
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Tyres OF RUssrAx PoucY.-'In Mos
cow" said Tchalaieff, 'they take every
stranger to see the great cannon and the
great bell-a cannon which it is impos-
sible to FIRE of, and bell which fell
down before It produced a sound Strange
town, where the curiosities are distinguish.
ell by their absurlity The hell how
ever, is yet the hest Of them. One can
take it as symbol Of this immense coun.
trv-quite mute and without tongue-of
This people. this race called slaves (sIo-
vove comes from slovo parole. as If to
express their astonishment at their hav-
ing the gift Of speech."
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A BRoKES FoRTUsE Ovid finely COM
pares broken fortune to a falling col
umn; the lower it sinks, the greater
weight it is obliged 10 sustain. Tins.
when a mans circumstances are such that
he has no occasion to borrow, he finds
Numbers willing to lend him; but should
his wants be such. that he sues for tri-
ae. it is two to one whether he may be
trusted with the smallest sum
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09


A MIRACULoUs ESCAPE Mr.. Weld,
an Englisher, who travelled in America,
and of course wrote a book about his
travels and troubles in these willis when
he came home safe, thus discourses of a
miraculous escape from being run over.
which he experienced in Ohio, when
riding in a light carriage, driven by a
boy:
"But when. on turning a corner, we
came suddenly in sight of board with
the well known notice, Look out for the
locomotive phen the bell rings. which was
made more impressive by hearing the
signal. and seeing the line Of steam an
nouncing the proximity of train. /
was somewhat anxious. as my driver did
not manifest the slightest disposition to
stop. As usual the road and the railway
crossed on the same level. which dill not
lessen nv anxiety. Hold hard. stop.
stopl" l criel; aid as these words re-
ceived no attention. rose from my seat
and graSped the drivers arm, for the
purpose Of arrestlng our progress bnt in
vain. Lashing the horse with redonbled
energy. he replied to my entreaties to
stop. by tie assurance he would go ahead
Of the engine; and to my horror. on we
went. buggy and train approximlting
rapidly at right angles; the locomotives
bell meanwhile ringing flriously Whit
seemed to be my death-knell. Finding
all my efforts to avert an anticipated col
lision were futile. resumed nv seat, and
resigned myself 10 my fate. What did
or said during the next few moments |
know not hut 1 remember a feeling of
sickness came over u'e as we dashed
across the line. anil l beheld the iron
horse rushing EDWARDS. and almost felt
the hot blast of its steam Jets. There,
l told you I'd clear the darn'd thing.
said my driver, chuckling over the
achievement"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

aPrsy sin" said Judge. angrily, to a
blunt old Quaker. from whom no direct
ssnswsr could be obtained, edo you know
what we sit here for ?"
..Yss verify l do" said the Quaker !;
''thres Of you for four dollars each day;
and the fat one in the middle for four
thousand rear"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Father Shehane. an old Universalist
preacher in Alabama, is called by the
people 'qhe walking Bible" In coun-
ty Court, on a certain occasion, it was
discovered that there was no Bible in the
court house to swear the jurors upon
The Judge casting his eve on the vener-
able preacher, said there's Shehane, he
has the Bible in his head; they can lay
their hands on him, and that viii answer
every purpose"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

The Chinese are said to have labored
for centuries under great embarrassment.
from not knowing how to make barrel.
They could. without difficulty. make
slaves. setihem up and hoop them IN;
and. indeed. with the help Of man in.
side. they could put the second bead on;
but how to get the man out after the bar
rel was headed-that was the question.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

ASEcDoTE OF SIN WALTER ScorT.-
Lady Scott had rich piece of cake.
which she presented on a salver with a
glass Divine. and which. not being cut
into nibbleable pieces. had long remained
entire. and had been presented and repre-
sented time without number to sigges-
tive visitors. till her husband at length
became tired of seeing the same piece so
often. and one day remarked. when a
guest was present, Really. Charlotte.
this piece Of cake Of yours is beginning
to make me an old man."
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

PRNTERs' ROLLERS Writ Trim
bic. of Georgetown, d. c.. informs the
National Intelligence that he has invent
ell a composition for printers rollers,
which win he unaffected by temperature
not made too soft by Summer heat. or
hard by Winters cold. besides being
more tenacious and durable. This i'm
provement viii obviate great inconveni-
ence experienced in the present compost
ton used for rollers. and win be a most
welcome discovery for all printers.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A very excellent backing may be
made by mixing in half pint Of water
and ivory black. adding thereto half an
ounce of brown sugar and the white of an
egg. This makes what is called "shin-
ing backing
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A KISD-HEAETED NEsRo.-"Pompey.
are you willing to he damned If It should
be the viii Of the Lord ?" inquired q
pious friend.
"0h. yes. massa, and more too; am
willing you be damned too. massa." re-
piled Pompey.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

"Will you take the life of Pierce or
Scott this morning, madam 2" said a
news-boy, to old aunt Be;sey.
mo, my lad" she replied. they may
liveto the end of their days for me-PTe
nothins arin' Fem"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

CARE OF STocK.-Constant and kind
care ofstock is something like frequent
hoeing to corn crop. The hoeing keeps
the soil light. and susceptible of receiv-
ing valuable influences from the atmos-
phere, and thus saves manure.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09
@nr strap 8aak:
SUMNER
By HON. MRS. NORTON.

This is tie tine Of shadow AID OF flowers,
When roads gieamj white fer mani. a winding mile;
When gentle treezrf fan the lazy bours.
And balmy Fsst rspays TIE time ftoil-
When purpls huss ard shilling beams beguils
The tedious sanensss Of tAe heAth-srown m.or-
When the old granlsire sees, with placid smils,
The sunburat children frolie round his door,
And trsllised roses deck the cottage Of the poor.
The time ofP'eassnt evenings, Whea the noon
Rises accompanied bv Jingle stsr,
And rivals cen the brilliant sumner noon.
In the elesrradiancs which she pOurs sfar;
No stormy winds her boar Of peace to mar,
Or stir the iesey cloals which melt away
Beneath the wheels srhcr illuminated car;
While many river ir,mbles in hsrray,
And silver CLEAN the sands round many an ocean bay
Oh, the hear hes hushed. afraid to beat,
In the deep ah5ence Of an other soand;
And home is sought with bath AMI lingering feet,
As though that shining tract Of fairy ground,
onoe left and lost, might never more be found:
And happy seems the life that giPsies lead,
Who make their nests WHERE NOISY banks abohnd,
In hooks whsrs unplucked wild flowers she'd their seed
A canvas sPr,'din. tent the only r,of they need.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

4 poet asked gentleman what he
thought Of his production, "An Ode to
Sleep" TIE latter replied: "You have
done so much Justice to the subject, that
is Is impossible TO read I. without feeling
its whole weight"
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

To MAKE WHrrEwAsH THAT WILL NOT
RIB Drink up half pail full Of
lime and water, ready to put on the wall;
then take one gill of -four, and mix it
with the water; then pour on it boiling
water sufficient to thicken it; pour it
while hot into the whitewaSh; stir all
well together, and it is ready for use.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

The mind that ia open for conviction,
and determined to pnrsue wherever she
may guide. will derive lessons. even from
its own mistakes. which mag prove sal
utary to itself AMI to the world. OH
how grand is that character that can rise
superior to selfshness. aad cling to the
glory Of immutable truth.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Flowing while in blossom will des-
troy sorrel. and lining viii prevent its
srowth.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

A false friend and a shadow attend
only while the sun shines.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Girls are like peaches. the nearer they
are ripe the more they blush.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

All who wish to be ricb, must spend
less than they earn.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

Death hath nothing terrible in it but
what life hath made so.
White Cloud Kansas chief. [volume] (White Cloud, Kan.) 1857-1872, 1857-07-09

The best sn1ff used is snuff of fresh
air,