Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1857-05-21

full instrument. It'bristled all over. 1t sci
forth, among other things, that Hoscraft,
"by instergation of the devil Mikes orthog.
raphy was his OWN, and agin the peace and
dignity of the people, and with malls fore.
tho't, with gun, pistle, 'nife, club, stick,
stone, or some other dangerous thing, shot,
cut, knocked, smashed, or in some other
way, killed Jones dog;f to Jones damage Of
one hundred dollars" Mike had picked this
all out from precedents of indictments and
declarations, so as to make it strong as he
said. He had ten counts, but the whole
were substantially the same; but Mike wan
ted his papers 'lawyer-like.'
'Old Dot.and-g -go.one' put in the plea. This
was name the defendants attorney had ac-
quired in Buzzardtown. He was wooden
legged mana superanuated justice, who
was somewhat in years, and he had taken to
the 'bar' He practised at all the 'bars' in
the country-before the landlords and the
justices-and was equally able at either.
Mike Briar called up the suit and opened
the case, and put Tabitha Tweedle on the
stand. She was woman of about fifty years
of age, raw.boned, took snuff necessarily,
and evidently had story to tell
"Know Jones?" inquired Mike.
"Yees," answered Tabitha.
"Hoscraft?"
"Yees"
"The dog?"
"Yees"
"Well, whatdo you know 'aboutthe dog?"
"Object to thatp' exclaimed attorney for
defendant; ''the dog amt no party here"
After longargument, Bumbleton decided
that the dog was 'kinder party to the
suit.
oval" continued Tabitha, "you want to
know all bout Jones, and Hoscraft, and
that ere dog. To begin, then: Mrs. Jones
and old Mrs. Brown-NIrs. Jones, you know,
was Curtis fore she got married; old Sim
Curtis darter-lived down on the Mohawk;
that is, Mrs. Jones lived down on the Mo-
hawk; the darter was born in Buzzardtown;
let me see, she must be twenty-five years old,
enymost- as I was saying, Mrs. Jones
and old Mrs. Brown-pshaw Mrs. Jones
is morn twenty-five years old what am I
thinking bout, she's thirty, sartin; cause
my Liza and she's bout of ah age, and my
Liza is-is-is-Mr Tweedle /! Mr.. Tacec-
die how old is cur Liza" inquired the wit
ness, and the old lady rose from her seat and
peered through the crowd for Mr.. Tweedle.
A voice came struggling through the mass
of people, but no Tweedle was seen-"Dun
knoww
"Don't-know-ho -old-our Liza is !!
Dear me p and Mrs. Tweedle sat down.
"Mrs. Tweedle," exclaimed Mike, 'what
do you know about that dog?"
"Jest coming to that" exclaimed Mrs.
Tweedle. Don't be in such pesky hurry;
let woman breathe, won'tye? Mrs Jones
and old Mrs Brown"
"Don't say Jones and Brown agin," snap
ped out Mike. Talk about that dog.'
Mrs. Tweedle said, 'she should tell the
truth, and talk about Jones, or Mrs. Jones,
and all the Joneses, if she wanted to. AS |
was saying" continued the witness
Tweedle told the witness to stop!
Squire Bumbleton said she might 'go on
GAS I was saying-Mrs. Jones and Mrs.
Brown--thatis. Wal, now, thar; you've
jest put me out, and don't know nothing
where was wish the dog was in Bally-
hak. (Here she took snuff violcnty.) Wal,
at any rate,' said she, rallying, "the dog is
dead, that's a fact; and Mrs. Quipes told
me that Cinda Clark told her,
"No hearsay evidence here" cried old
Dot-and- -go-one.
"No hear-say no hear-say evidence !"
repeated Mrs. Tweedle-'can't tell what
you've heerd faint la, ha a!-then I guess
you can do your own swearin', l shan't. 1
didn't see no dog killed And Mrs. Twee-
die took another pinch of snuff, blew a sig.
nifcant blast from her nose, and left the
stand, muttering to herself, Cant tell whaa
you've heer'd?
"Hurrah for old Mrs. Tweedlc !" cried
two or three of the Jones party, as she re-
tired under flying colors.
Squire Bumbleton started up from doze,
filed his pipe afresh during the excitement,
gave a grunt, shifted his legs, and leaning
back, TRANQUILITY blew out long jets of smoke
from the right corner of his mouth.
Joe Racket was the next witness called.
Joe was swift Witness in every sense Of
the word. He came driving through the
multitude, and presenting himself before the
magistrate, with his hat and overcoat on,
raised his right hand and exclaimed: go
ahead, squire
"Name 2" inquired Bumbleton.
"Joseph W. Racket-W stands for Wa
ters-Joseph Waters Racket-mother was
Waters-'long'd to York State Waters
Sch harie Waters"
"That'll do" said the Squire.
Joe was sworn, and before the oath was
fully administered, he launched out like an
arrow, without waiting for any questions, as
follows:
"Know Jones-know Hoscraft-live clus
near one another-Jones young man, Hos
craft older-have seed the dog-part bull,
part terrier-good for COWS, bad for sheep
Jones and Hoscraft quarrel'd bout geese
HOscraft's geese came home picked-Hos-
craft said Jones picked 'em-Jones said it
| WAS an infernal lie-Was down to Hoscraft'a