Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1857-06-03
READABLE PARAGRAPHS,

~ The man whose feelings were "worked
up" has obtained fresh supply.
@- Why should little boy be careful to
watch the conduct Of his papas sister? Because
the Bible says: " Consider the ways Of the aunt
and be wise.''
~ "Paddy," says joker "why don't you
for man? "And yours" replied Pat fought
to be lengthened-they are too short for un ass"
H-PIckLgs.-An excellent way to make
pickles that will keep year or more, is to drop
them into boiling water, but not boil themi let
them stay in ten minutes, wipe them dry, and
drop into cold spiced vinegar, and they will not
need to be put into salt aud water aud always
ready for use.
n6r Drawing mistake or prejudice out Of
the head is as painful rs drawing tooth, and
the patient never thanks the operator. II is d
very hard matter to unlearn anything.
@A WoNAN's REvENGE.-Hcster Simons in
Troy has been fined SIS for disnterring the
corpse of the husband of widow Lady with whom
she had a quarrel, and upon whom she thus vent.
ed her Spite That's the latest invention of.
feminine cruelty.
@@ Talk of the inferiority of the female
mind" exclaimed an excited oratorian "Why,
Mr. President, woman possesses infinitely more of
the divine af1atus than man, and any one who
attempts to get around her in these days. yil
have to start very early in the morning"
@ Two boys, one of them blind of one eye,
werediscussing the merits of their respective pas.
ters.
CHOW many hours do you get for sleep''
asked one.
Eight" replied the other.
"Eig ght! why only gets four"
"Ah /" replied the FIRST, but recolect you
have only got one eye to close, and have two.'
~THE TEACHER PosED.-A teacher asked
on the globe?"
"Dont know sir" was the answer.
"Well now," pursued the teacher, "if we're
to bore hole through the earth, and you we're
to 20 in at this end, where would you come out7'
"Out Of the hole, STRIP replied the pupil with
an air of triumph.
I~ SOWING GARDEN SEEns.-.All fat seed
should be sown edgewise for if laid fat on the
ground they are apt to rot and if this misfortune
does not befall them they do not germinatc so
readily This accounts for failures amongst
gourds, melons, and cucumbers.
B63. An old Revolutioner says, that Ot all the
solemn hours no ever saw, that occupied in going
home one dark night from the widow Ben,'s,
aftes being told by her daughter Sally that he
@ncean't come again" was the most solemn.
p@"Mr Diff you'll get my pants done by
Saturday, shall be forever indebted to YOU
g II thats your game they'll not be done, sure
said the tailor.
p6r The Supreme Court of Ohio has decided
that a wife is of no pccuniary value to her nus
band TINT if she be killed By railroad accident
no cannot receiver damages therefor.
pF" 4 clergyman was ccnsurins young lady
for tight lacing. "Whv," replied the arch Miss,
"you would not recommend loose habits to your
parishioncrs?" The clergyman, thus outwiitsd,
smiles thoughtfully
l6- Hearing man say that political papers
of all kinds had become such liars that for his
part he did not believe any of thcm,' reminds
me Of the old story Of the miller and his three
sons. Coming to the mill, and finding grist in
tho hopper, the old man cried out: "isll, have
you tolled this sria q "Ycs sir" "Jim, have
you tolled this grist 2 "ies, sir" Henry,
have you tollr,i this grist T. Yes sir" You are
all pack of lying scoundrels.' says the old
nan. al don't believe worl Of what you say
| III toll it myself