The western Democrat. [volume] (Charlotte, N.C.) 1852-1870, 1857-12-15
SLIT LovENGooD'S DADDY ACT
ING HORSE" -.


ING HORSE"
rTIold that are boss down to the yearth'
He, spreading his tail to fly now. Keep |
linn wbar he is 'Wo, WO, Shavetall' =
Hes a dancing jig
These, and like expressions, were au-
dressed to a queer looking, long-iegged'
sL,rt bodied. small headed, white barred
hog eyed, funny sort of a genius fresh from
some bench legged Jews clothing store
mounted on .TearpOke.' nick tailed, bow
urcked. long poor horse, half dandy hall
devil. aud envcloped all over in perfect net
work of bride. reins, cruPpers, martin
gales, straps, circingles and red ferretting'
who Lad refined up in front OF Pat Nashe's
grocery, among a crowd of mountaIneers'
i'll of tight and mean whiskey.
Il say, you darned ash cat, just keep
YOUR shirt on, will YET You have never
seen rale boss till ride up; TearPoke is
lust I.ext to the ever shellep-nubbins, an
he's dead as d still worm, poor old 1lcky-
tail
What killed him, SUIT p says an anxious
inquirer.
WHY nuthing, you 'tarnal fool; he just
died SO, died a standing up at that Warn't
not that good pluck? Froze stiff; no. not
that adzactly, but starved fust, and then
froze afterwards, so stiff that when dad and
me pushed him over, he jist stuck out so
(spreading his arms and legs.) like car
peuter's bench, and we waited seventeen
DAYS for him to thaw afore we could skin
IN. Well, thar we was--Dad and me
Counting on his fingers dad, an me oil
Sail an Jake Fool Jake as we called him
for shortl an Janass an Phineass, an me,
and Callne Jane, and Sharlottean, an 81
neon, Sam'l. an Cashus Henry Clay, an
Noar Dan Webster, an me, and the twin
gals an Catharine Second, and Cleopatra
ry Antony, and Jane Lind. and Tom Bull
lion, an the Baby, an the prospect, an
man herself, all left without ara boss to
crap with. There was a nice mess for a
'spectablo white fumily to be a sla>himg
about in, warI't it! be darned if didm'
feel like sorter stealing a boss SOMETIMES.
Well, we waited, and rested, an wished,
hoping that some stray boss mout come
along. but dog my cat, eff eny SIGH luck a.
that ever Gums whar dad is, he's SO drafted
mean, and lazy, an ugly, an savage.
We'll, one mite, dad lie awake all mite, a
snortin, an rollin', and BLOWN. an il
scratchin', an q whisperin to man, an next
morning, says he. 'Sut, I'll tell you what
well do; III be boss myself, and pull the
plough, while you drive me, an then the
'"ld quilt CHATS mam) OH the brats kin
plant, or let it alone, jist u they please
5" out we went to the pawpaw thicket, and
I,ralrd Il rite peart chance of bark, an mann
and mc made geers for dad, an they be-
come him mriily, then he would have a bril-
dial. SO / tux all old umbrrller what I'd
found, IL little fnrkcd piece of iron, sur
ter like onto pitch fork We know, an we
bent an twisted it sorter intu bridal bit,
smnfil shape, {dnd wanted Il kurb, he said
h,. hadn't wOrht for some time, an mite
sortcr feel his oats and 60 cavnrtin'.) Well,
when we got the bridal all fixed on dad, he
chomped nu' bit jist like boss, (he alters
was u most komplicated darn't old fool eny
how, and mann alters said 50 when he warn't
abuut.) then put on tie gecrs, an out dad
and me goes to the field, leadin' dad by
the bride, and toting the gopher plough
ON my back. When we cum to the fence,
l let down the gap, aud it made dad mad
he wanted to jump the fence oil all fuurs,
huss ways. hitchcd him on to the gopher,
and away we went, dad lcaaIim' forward tn
his pulIim' rite pcart, and we made SHARP
rl"wiu', dad going rite over the sprouts
and bushes same a. rulc boss, the only
differ was he went on two legs. Presently
we cum to SassHfrac bush and to keep VI
his karac,,r huss bulpcd square intu
it, and thru it, and tore down hornet:
nest nigh u big as a hoss's head. and al
the tribe covered him rite strate. lie rear
cd and kicked once or twice and fetched
squeal wus nor ara boss in the district, anC
sot in to runnin' away jost as natural a.
ever you seed. let 60 the lines and hol
Tered, 'woa, dad, woa y but We mout as wei
said 'woa' to q locomotive. Gewhillicans
how he run! When he cum to the bushe
he cleared the top of it, gopher and all =
'praps he thought there mout be anothe
settlement of bald hornets in it, and that
wur safer TO go over than thru, and quicke
done. every now and then he'd paw tn
sides of his head with fu<t one foreleg, the
to'ther, then he'd gin himself an overland
ed slap, that sounded liks a wagon whip,
a1if ha opf- ~ . ,bo
jist about as fast an as high from the yeart
as the gopher was carried, swear. Whe
he come to the fence he busted rite throug
it, tarrin down rite into seven PANELS, scat
term and breakin the rales mitily, an
here he left the gopher, geers, singletree
and klevis all mixed up, and not worth
darn. Most ov his shirt stuck on the en-