davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

An ACCOMMODATING SPIRr-In certain
New England parish difficulty arose about
the location of the new meeting house and the
church was rent with the division. The
pastor at length preached a melting sermon
off the subject of union and the congregation
were dissolved in tears. The next morning
Deacon Jones went over early to see his oppo-
nent, Deacon Shaw, to make an earnest effort
for peace, and the following ensued
Deacon J." Deacon Shaw, l hay'nt slept
a wink all night-and I've come over to see
if we can't have peace on this subject of the
meeting house we must settle the difficult
ty."
Deacon s." Well, am very happy to
hear you talk so, for to tell the truth, always
thought you were little set in your way"
Deacon j" Not at all-and as a proof
that am not, I've come this morning on pur-
pose to see you. Now, Deacon Shaw, we
must settle this unhappy difficulty, and there
is but one way to do it-you must give up for
[ can't"
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

RSs- The man who is to poor to take pa
per has bought slabsided dog, an old shot
gun, and twenty shilling gold watch He
edncates his children in the streets, and his
shanchais board on his neighbors.
ny Never break your neck to bow at all
to sweet sixteen" with founced dress.
who is ashamed of her old fashioned mother !;
or to strutting collegiate who is horrifed at
his grandmother's bad grammer.
ag- A carpenters apprentice, too lazy to
work. lodges it in this fashion when he takes
a notion be bumps his nose against post till
it blecds, and then sits down to have resting
spell
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

The WATERS OF THh NILE.-The Nile water
is particularly soft. 1t fills the mouth with a
rich, creamy taste and in drinking it, in Or
der to enjoy it, it is we'll to spread it over eve
ry part of the palate. 1t should be drank,
not to quench thirst, but to create high plea
sure. 1t should not, therefore, be swallowed
in large draughts at time, but taken at short
intervals, every other hour or So In the
house the water jar-the admirable Egyptian
water,jar, which is so much more porous than
the Indian iar-should be at hand by day and
by night continually The passion for Nile
water like the love of everything that is in
tensely exquisite iu its way, increases with its
enjoyment. No one who has once or twice
tasted Nile water, and has a capacity for plea
sure, will ever after consent to drink of it poi
soned with the infusion of any other liquid
Jealous of its own honor, it appears to be the
most averse of all waters to join in harmony
with wine Indeed mixed with wine. it is u
most nauseous compound. In the hotels, the
water undergocs filtration. In the cottages
through the country, it is kept in large YES
sells, which allow the sediment to fall TO the
bottom. The small clay jars, in which it is
placed before you in the hotels, are very grace
full in form, and finely adapted to keep the Ii.
qud cool-Brwce'S Scenes and Sights IN Tire
East
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

YOUTHFUL PREcocIrY.-Th following incl
dent, coming direct from one of the dramats
persona may be relied upon as as fact
The Rev, Mr.. w a Clergyman of neigh
boring town, being recently absent from home
on business, his little son, lad of four years,
calmly folding his hands and asked the bless
ing usually pronounced by his father at their
morning meal. At noon, being asked to pro-
nounce the blessing, he replied, with grave
face. :" No, l don't like the looks of them
taters"
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28
selettsS Qoetrp.
ROBINS ME.
BY wM. COLDwELL
s~A~&

BY Wh. COLDMELLs
From the elm-tree's topmost bough,
Hark the robins early song,
Telling, one and all, that now
Merry spring time hastes along;
Welcome tidings thou dost bring.
Little harbinger of spring
RObin's come.
OF the winter we are weary,
Weary of its frost and snow,
Longing for the sunshine ckeery,
And the brooklet's gurgling flow
Gladly when we hear thee sing
The reveille of the spring.
Robins come.
Ring it out DER hill and plain,
Through the garden lonely bowers,
Till the green leaves dance again.
Till the air is sweet with flowers
Wake the cowslip by the rill,
Wake the yellow dahodil,
Robins come.
Then, as thou vert wont of yore,
Build thy nest and rear thy young,
Close beside our cottage door,
In the woodbine leaves among;
Hurt or harm thou needst not fear
Nothing rude shall venture near,
Robins come.
Swinging still DER yonder lane,
Robin answers merrily,
Ravished by the sweet refrain,
ALICE claps her hands in glee
Shouting from the open door,
With her clear voice Ger and DER,
"R0bin' come!'
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

GEN HousToN's PREscRIPrIoS TO BORE. "
Among the guests at the ST. Nicholas Ho-
tel, New York, recently, was General Sam
Houston, of Texas. Gen. Houston is, as all
his acquaintance well know, fond Of mirth and
fun, and in short is what Doesticks would call
p. B., perfect brick.
The General, however, entertains an intense
hatred for that species of human beings call
ed boreS" One of these gentry, good ma
tured but soft headed chap regular button
holder, cornered him at his hotel He had
managed to be introduced to him by gentle
man the day previous.
General" said the bore, after he had both
cred Mr. Houston out of all patience, d" wish
you could do me one favor. A man of your
eminence is so competent"
"Well, what is it ?" inquired Mr.. Houston
rather curtly.
well, you see, Mr. Houston, you are such
an eminent man. such q"
" Never mind that what do you want to
know p
Excuse me, but person of your abilities
and distinction must be aware =
. | am somewhat in haste" Interrupted the
badgered Senator pray come to the point
at once"
"Well then, give me the secret of your sue
cess in life-how you rose in position as you
have done"
"Oh but that wouldn't benefit you any
| can tell you how You can rise in the world
if you wish"
That's just it, was the reply just what
| was trying to get at"
We'll, sir, I'll tell you. Undertake to ap-
proach sore-headed bull with red scarf on
your neck I'll guarantee your upward pro-
gress Immediately on the completion of the ex-
pertinent"
The button-holder collapsed, showed his hat
on his head, and walked sorrowfully away,
while cluster of gentlemen near by, who had
overheard the conversation, fairly screamed
with laughter.
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

\ LEAK TO BE MENDED-A friend return
ing from the depot, a few mornings since, with
a bottle of freshlyimported Maine Law" saw
young lady, whom he must inevitably join
So putting the bottle under his arm, he walked
alongside
Well" said the young lady after dispos-
ing of "health" and the weather." "what is
that bundle you are carrying SO mysteriously
under your arm 2" (from which she discovered
dark fluid drpping,)
"Oh nothing but coat which the tailor
has been mending for me-"
"Oh its coat, is it Well, you'd better
carry it back, and get him to sew up one more
hole, it leaks ~
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

Bg-" What do you know of the defend
ant, Mr. Thompson do yon consider him
good musician }" "On that point / wish to
swear with great care don't wish to lnsl1-
uate that Mr. Van Stops is not good musl-
clan, Not at ALL All Iwish to sayls this :
The day after he commenced playing the elar-
met, saw-filer, who lived next door, left home
and has never since been heard FROM" THAT
will do Mr. Thompson. Call the next wit
ness.
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

A Knock Down ARGUMENT.-A boy was
caught in the act of stealing dried berries in
front of store the other day, and was locked
up in a dark closet by the grocer, He COM
menccd begging most patheticaly to be re-
leased, and, after using all the persuasion that
his young imagination could invent, propo-
sed, " Now, if you'll let me out and send for
my daddy, he'll pay you for the berries and
lick me besides ?" The appeal was too much
for the grocery man to stand out against
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

sT Through some mistake gentleman in
the south of Ireland, led off a dance, at a
country ball, out of his turn. The person APP
pointed to the post of honor challenged the
intruder, and receive the following reply
"Sir cannot understand why, because
open ball at night, ball should open me
in the morning
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

LovE.-A comman complaint of the heart,
growing out of an ordinary longing after some
thing difficult to obtain. 1t attacks persons of
both sexes, generally between the ages of fif-
teen and forty some have been known to have
it at fifty. ... ..- ..
Sgmpt0ms-Absence of mind calling tears
nectar and sighs zephyrs, fondness for poe
try and, music, gazing on the moon and stars,
loss of appetite, neglect Of business, a loathing
for all things save one, blood.sh eyes, and a
constant desire to sigh. . - ....----..
Efects-A strong heart burn, pulse high,
stupidity, eloquent eyes, sleeplessness and all
sorts of things At times imagination bright
bowers of roses-winged Cupids-and but
tered peas and then again grim oceans des.
pair, racks, torments and pistols. ...
Cure-Get married Immediately.
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

Do1xG GOOD TO oTHERs.-Here is pretty
story of little girl Perhaps you have read
it before, but it will do you good to read it
again: -
"A mother who was in the habit of asking
what they had done during the day to make
Others happy found young granddaughter
silent. The elder one spake modestIy of deeds
and dispositions founded on the golden rule
'Do unto others as you would that they should
do unto YOU" Still the little bright face was
bowed down in silence. The question was re-
peated, and the dear little girl said timidly =
"a little girl sat by me on the bench at school
had lost little baby brother. All the time
she studied her lesson she hid her face in her
book and cried. ! felt SO sorry that laid
my face on the same book, and cried with her.
Then she looked up and put her arms around
my neck, but | do not know why she said l
had done her so much good"
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

ag~A woman in Ohio, put her baby into
the washing tub, and its dirty frock and pet
ticoat into the cradle and set her little boy
to rock it. She did not discover her mistake
until the baby cried, when she pinned its left
leg to the line, as she hung it out in the
yard to dry.
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

pag A witty lawyer jocoseIy asked board
ing house keeper in the Recorders Court the
following question
"Mr. Smith, if man was to give you a
hundred dollars to keep for him, and he dies
what would you do? Would you pray for
him ?"
No sir I would pray for another like
him ?"
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

By At a Sunday school examination the
the teacher asked q boy after he had been
standing and repeating, whether he could for
give those who had wronged him Gould
you said the teacher forgive boy for ex-
ample, who had insultcd or struck you ?"
"Y-c-e-s, sir think could, if he scas big
rer than l."
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28

H- An Irish lieutenant stationed abroad,
being informed by letter that his widowed
mother had married second time expressed
his alarm about his right of primogenture. by
hoping that :" she wouldn't have son older
than himself
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28
TOWANDA: ::

Gbursoap alorninp, iilan 2s. 1854.
Bradford reporter. [volume] (Towanda, Pa.) 1844-1884, 1857-05-28
M isttIlantons.
BENEDICT ARNOLDs TREASON.

A REM1NIscENCE OF GEN. WASHINGTON.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15
LOTTERIES.

TENHE Lotteries Of Samuel Swan & Co. are char
n tered by the State Of Georgia, and have sworn
commissioners appointed to superintend their
drawings, and certify that everything connected
with the same is done 10 strictly honorable man
ner They offer to the public fair opportunity
for investment, the interests Of parties az dis.
lance being as well protected as though they were
present. The managers would respectfully call
attention 10 the fact that all persons have legal
right TO send orders for tickets 10 Georgia. as die
lotteries Of Samuel Swan & Co. are authorized
by the Legislature Of that State. A lottery will
be drawn every Saturday throughout the year. all
orders received being filled in the drawing next
10 take place after the same comes 10 hand. Ae-
cording TO the scheme one ticket Ia every ten
must draw n prize. Tickets SO; halves, So
quarters SO 30. No tickets sent unless the mon,
ey accompanies the order. The drawings are
upon the principle Of one number on each ticket
and are so simple that none can fail 20 understand
them. There is no combination Of numbers L
4 mysriy the buyer. Prizes vary from sac 10 see
COOS every prize being drawn, and result Of draw
/ Ing forwarded 10 all purchasers.
/ IL list Of the numbers that are drawn from
the wheel, With the amount that each prize IA en-.
Tilted To- VIII be published after every drawing
~ the following papers New Orleans Della
/ Mobile Rsatsfer, Charleston Standerd Nashville
easeits, Atlanta iatelAgs1eeF, SIxaaaah keta
and New York Weekly Day Book. Write you
address plainly, and direct 70 s. SWAN g. Co
AaLaata Georgia.
! Prizes paid Ia full mo percentage dedaetes
1 from prizes a. in other lotteries
! All communications strictly confidential lay
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15

ARE YOU PLANTING OUT A GRAPE
VINE ?-Then dig the ground two feet
deep, and at least space of four feet in
diameter and also dig and mix in with
the earth one bushel Of areH rotted barn
yard manure for each vine. Do not use
fresh manure, and if you have no old,
then mix one quart of lime, and two
quarts ground or broken bones, with one
gallon Of chamber ley; scatter it over
the ground beforehand, and dig in thor
oughly. When you plant the vine, see
to it, first, that the roots are not dry and
dead cut one if it is black in the in.
side, it is dead; try another; if any are
blackened and dead, cut them away
The roots of young grape vines viii moi
bear much exposure, and often plants are
set out when not a single root win grow
and thus the plant is not better than /;
cutting. Cut your vine after planting, 81
that only two buds are left to grow.
you have been careful to prepare tn,
ground as above, have spread out tn
roots, carefully, in setting, have not tro
upon the ground, and afterward are care
full to keep the ground hoed once in tw
weeks, all summer, your vine viii be 81
feet high in October.-O Ohio Farmer.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15

SAVING Trees GIRDLED BY MICE
On the 9th of June last, my neighbor j.
]. Green, came TO me and wished me to
doctor some apple trees that had been
girdled by the mice in the winter pre-
vious. i told him it was too late, but be
said he guessed not, for he had kept them
moist with old rags. / went and found,
when the cloths were removed, new
bark covering all the wound. / asked
him what he had put on the rags. He
said be took equal parts of garden mould
and COW manure, made mortar, and ap-
piled this as the snow left. His trees
are now sound, and have grown well the
last summer. n. o. BoswoRTH.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15
THE DRIED SCOTT DECISION
IN PRACTICE.

LIN 460O 44OAs
SIamming the last door of the first car
and opening that of the second, the
" gentlemanly conductor of the New
York train made his appearance with his
bow and smile, and, tickets, gentlemen,
if you please"
Seated in the front corner, surrounded
by her personal conveniences, such as
carpet bag, umbrella, big bundle, little
bundle, a few apples and pieces of cake,
was a colored lady, whose face, the hue
Iof an inverted saucepan, contrasting with
her snow-white ivory and eyeballs, gave
that pleasing African expression which
is so often the type Of humor and good
nature.
"Ticket, ma'am," says our conductor,
with a civility regardless of complexion.
"Ihasn't got EN-" she replied, but
rse got money any way" and she began
to tumble in her bag, then in the bundles,
searching these articles through in vain.
"Come, hurry, up" exclaimed her
now slightly impatient friend; =" can't
wait all day."
Bress yer soul, yer don't think find
: every thing in a minute, but Use got
? money somewhar-must be in dis yeah
cawpet bag" and she felt in her pocket
: accordingly for the key.
i "WeIl, well, I'll pass throug, and
i when 1 get back perhaps you will have
, it ready"
q Yes, sartin," said Dinah but as he
. passed along she reached out her UNI
= breIla, and giving him poke upon the
shoulder, asked, "What you gwoin tt
L charge on freight?''
y "Freight what do you want to know
- that for ?"
" Cause I does; Use civil, amt / %
"Well, five cents a foot; there, don
bother me any more, but find you
> money" and he went his way.
There seemed to be peculiar droller,
=, about the lady's eye and mouth, as tn
one rolled around in its black sea of flesh
and the other opened to give vent to a
involuntary "yah! hap 1t was nc
long now before she found her purse, an
withdrew some coin, which she keE
= jingling in her hand, as she kept up he
occasional examinations.
In due time the conductor returned fc
-. his money, and upon extending his itcl
ing palm, was somewhat astonished :
b receiving the precise sum of ten cents.
;. what do you mean p he exclaime'
" The fare to New York is five dollars
= Vas, yas, l knows dat, for white foil
- folks a0hat am toNs-but ISe nobody
y Use freight, I is. Yah, yah! Pot
rule as don't work bof ways; five cen
. foot, heah they is! '' said she, extern
u ing pair of enormous ambulators fl
the inspection of the conductor and
:. all.
The nonplused functionary stood u
determined for a moment among Il
-. shouts Of the passengers, until idea
compromise occurred to him, as he e
no claimed: Well, if you are freight, tai
- yourself off into the baggage car" B
even there Dinah was too much for hi
nU-
as she replied, "Jus you pick up 20
freight if you want to cair UNI off,"
.u' This settled the point. The conduct
= vanished and Dinah offered pious e
culation: lord Dress dat ar Pre-
Court, and gin 'em credit for five dial
title bill, any way!''
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15

The NoRMANs.-Ralp phi Waldo En-
erson, in speaking of these early settlers
of England, says 60 The Normans came
out of France into England worse men
than they went into it, one hundred and
sixty years before. They had lost their
own language, and learned the Romance
of barbarous Latin Of the Gauls, and had
acquired, with the language, all the vices
it had names for. The conquest has ac-
quired in the Chronicle the name Of
" Memory of Sorrow" Twenty thou.
sand thieves landed at Hastings. These
founders of the House of Lords were
greedy and feroeious dragons, sons o.
greedy and ferocious pirates. They were
all alike; they took everything they coult
carry; they burned, violated, tortured
and killed, until everything English wa.
brought to the verge of ruin. Such
however, is the illusion of antiquity anG
wealth, that decent and dignifed men
now existing, boast their descent from
these filthy thieves, who showed a ia
greater conviction of their own merit:
by assuming for their types the swine
goat, jaekal, leopard, wolf and snake
which they Severally represented.
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15
CERTIFICATES.
Important from DR.. E. W. sabin, Of
Rochester. NY

December /, ls59.
This may certify that have male ti1
'BAcH's AMERICAN CoMPoUND" in 8 go Z
severe bronchial affection, and long ''aa-
irritation Of the nlHcHs coat Of the AAaaeaiaIy =,
By the use oftwo bottles OF the above ColaFy1-i
It is thought permanen. cure was aiiesis,I
have seen its wonderful effec in declaea q
Of ScroftfLa Consumption, where the palsn. =
thought 10 be beyond cHre-afteT taking ~ 4.
ties Of the american Compound is row thols-.
be otit Of danger, and Hsarly iceA fru9 49,
have seen Of the effect ofthe Compound, 49, !,
above named. e. W. sABIs, NJ
Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15
Bibles :! Bibles !!

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Craftsbnry, Feb. 6, 1867.
N. B. He would inst say that he has on hanc
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Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1857-05-15

"a If you wish to hear all the evil in
peoples character, wait till they get mar
ried. If you are DESTROYS to learn all
their good qualities, wait till they are
dead.