Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1857-04-02
fatt, fn11 4 fantp.
-Repentance always costs very dear.

elder brother of to-day.
About FIVE hundred pounds sterling are
in bank, at Cork, for monument to the late
Father Matthew.
- The man must be poor and friendless
indeed, who, at some period of his life,
hasn't received testimonial of some sort!
On Monday, no less than $50 letters on 70
public business were received at the Gener-
al Land Office in Washington.
What folly it seems for men to live poor
and toll hard, that they may be wealthy when
they die !!
Spare momentssare like the gold-dust Of
time. Of all portions of our life, spare mo-
ments are the most fruitful in good or evil
The Hindoos are promised thousand
years in Paradise for every hair of the head
or beard they part with.
Hon. Warren Winslow has announced
himself candidate for reelection to Con-
gress in North Carolina.
A pretty pair of eyes are the best mir
rors to shave by. "Yes," replied bachel-
or on reading the above, "many man has
been shaved by them"
-"Jo, how many scruples is there in
drachm Z" "Don't know, zur." "Well,
remember, there's eight" "Eight! pooh
dad always takes his without no scr"p1es."
"A corset-maker out of work thus vented
her complaint-"Shame that I should be
without bread-I, that have stayed the stom-
achs of thousands"
The gentleman who "fired at random"
did not hit it, and, in disgust, he lent his RI
fe to the youth who had determined to ''aim
at immortality"
-"Did you every 60 to military ball I?
inquired lively girl of an old soldier. "No,
my DEAR" replied the old Revolutionary,
oin those days the military balls came to us.
- If you desire to enjoy life, avoid un-
punctual people. They impede business and
poison pleasure Make it your own rule not
only to be punctual, but little beforehand.
- Eliza Cook very truly says:-"To ap-
preciate the value of newspapers, we have
only to suppose they were to be totally dis
continued for month"
An English paper states that abstemious
and facet;ous are the only two words in the
English language wherein the five vowels
follow each other in their proper order.
An aged Quakeress, the other afternoon,
was seen intently gazing upon piece Of bro
caded silk displayed in shop A passer-by
observed that it was Satin tempting Eve.
-"Wbat is the reason," said an Irishman
to another, 'that you and your wife are al
ways disagreeing?" "Because," replied
Pat, owe are both Of one mind: she wants
to be master, and so do l."
A Spanish proverb says: ga little in
the morning is enough; enough at dinner is
but little; but little at night is too much.
Remember this, and save indigestion and
sleepless nights.
Women are called "softer sex" because
they are so easily humbugged Out of one
hundred girls, ninety five would prefer osten-
tation to happiness dandy husband to
mechanic
An old lady, observing sign over tail
oring establishment, bearing the inscription
Fountain of Fashion," exclaimed, "Ah!
that must be the place where the sQuirts
come from"
BE always as mild as you can; honey
attracts more flies than vinegar. If you err
let it be on the side of gentleness. The
human mind is so constituted that it resists
severity and yields to softness
"A man being asked by his neighbor how
his wife did, made the following answer:
"IDdeed, neighbor, this case is pitiful my
wife fears she will die, and fear she will
not-which makes disconsolate house."
John went to the theatre once, when
Mrs. Smith was advertised to appear in t'co
pieces. After the performance he demanded
the return of his money, for he said Mrs.
Smith appeared rhole during both perform
ances.
In a late English paper it is stated that
"many prayer-books are now sold in London,
with looking-glass inserted in the inner
side of the cover, in order that ladies may
arrange their hair, or admire themselves,
while using the book at church"
There are two kinds of bores in this
world-the rich and the poor. You can
get rid of the latter by lending him five dol
lars. You can free yourself from the other by
attempting to borrow twenty dollars of him.
Try it on.
- Horace Greely declined being addressed
as an "Honorable," like other ex-members
of Congress, and requests that he may be
addressed as "simple Horace Greedy" Cor
respondents will please remember it, and
address their lines-"Simple Horace Gree
ly, Tribune Buildings, New York"
dds this goood money!" said man to
a suspiciouslooking wight who had made
some small purchase of him. "It ought to
be good, for I made it myself" was the an
swer. With that he took the man up for
coming; but the man in his defence, proved
that he made the money by boot-making.
1t is generally admitted that the Irish
are most famous for making bulls, but the
Dutch can 60 ahead for making pigs. For
| instance: