davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

shall make less stir in our realm than my
Lord of Leicester The gravest wisdom,
and the highest breeding lent their sane
ton to the practice. Lord Bacon play
fully declared himself descendant of 'Og
the King of Bashan Sir Philip Sidney,
with his last breath reproached the soldier
who brought him water, for wasting a
casque full upon dying man. A courtier,
who saw Othelo performed at the Globe
Theater, remarked that the blackamore
was brute, and not man.-'Thou hast
reason, replied a great Lord, according
to Plato his saying; for this be a two-leg-
ged animal aciM feathers The fatal habit
became universal. The language was
corrupted. The infection spread to the
national conscience. Political double-deal-
mgs naturally grew out of verbal double
meanings. The teeth Of the new dragon
were sown by the Cadmus who introduced
the alphabet Of equivocation. What was
levity in the time of the Tudors grew to
regicide and revolution in the age Of the
Stuarts"
Who was that boarder who just whis-
pered something about the Macaulay-ho-
wers of literature?-There was a dead
silence said calmly, | shall henceforth
consider any interruption by pun asa
hint to change my boarding house. Do not
plead my example. If I have used any
such, it has been only as Spartan father
would show up drunken helot. We
have done with them.-Ahontic IKo1hy.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

ASSISTANCE FROM PRovIDENoE.--A
good old Connecticut deacon was attach
ing very poor and feeble pair of oxen to
a very large and heavy load of wood. A
neighbor asked him how he expected to
get so large load to market with so
poor a team ? The good deacon replied
that he expected to have some assistance
from Divine Providence. His neighbor
asked him whether it would not be as
well to dispense entirely with the oxen,
and let Divine Providence drav the aoholt
load.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Clothing.
NEW GOODS, NEW GOODS,
A r THE NORFOLK HALL OF
N FASHION, NO IS MAIN
STREET, NORFOLK,
VA.

Il.
Opened this day most superb stock of
SPRING andSUMMER CLOTHING, manutactur-
ed of the very best materials and in the la
test and most fashionable styles. The public
are respectfully invited to call and satisfy
themselves that they are the finest and best
assorted stock of
Ready Made Clothing
ever offered in this city. | am determined
to sell on the most reasonable terms, and no
pains shall be spared to please all who may
favor me with their patronage.
~ Gentlemen's Furnishing Goods of
every variety and description, both of quail
ity and price. My stock of CLOTHS, CAssG-
MEREs AND VEsTINGs, are also large and well
selected.
All orders punctually attended to, and sat
isfaction guaranteed in all cases.
N. B.-A good stock of BOYS CLorHING
always on hand, which l will sell very low.
oc3 r. D. CLIFTON.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Puns And Punning.
BY o. w. HOLMES

Do you mean to say the pun-question
is not clearly settled in your minds? Let
me lay down the law upon the subject.
Life and language are alike sacred. Homi-
eide and serbicide-that is, violent treat
ment of word with fatal results to its
legitimate meaning, which is its life
are alike Observation-Disclosures,
which is the meaning of the one, is the
same as mans laughter. which is the end
of the other. A pun is prima .facie an
insult to the person you are talking with.
1t implies utter indifference to or sublime
contempt for his remarks, no matter how
serious. I speak of total debravity, and
one says all that is written on the sub iect
is deep raving. / have committed my
self-respect by talking with such person.
l should like to commit him, but cannot,
because he is nuisance. Or1 speak oe
geological commissions, and he asks inf
what was the cosine of Noah's ark; also,
whether the Deluge was not a great deal
huger than any modern inundation.
A pun does not commonly justify a
blow in return. But if blow were
given for such cause, and death ensued
the Jury would be Judges both of the facts
and of the pun, and might, if the latter
were of an aggravated character return
verdict of justifable homicide. Thus,
in a case lately decided before Miller, j.,
Doe presented Roe subscription paper,
and urged the claims of suffering hu-
manity. Roe replied by asking, when
charity was like Il top? 1t was in evil
dence that Doe preserved dignifed 81
lence. Roe then said. When it begins
to hum Doe then, and not till then
struck Roe, and his head happening
to strike bound volume of the Monthly
Rag-bag and Stolen Miscellany, intense
modification ensued, with a fatal result.
The chief laid down his notions of the law
to his brother justices, who unanimously
replied, Jest So" The chief rejoined,
that no man should jest so without being
punished for it, and charged for the
prisoner, who was acquitted, and the pun
ordered to be burned by the sheriff. The
bound volume was forfeited as deodand
but not claimed.
People who make buns are like wanton
boys that put coppers on the railroad
tracks. They amuse themselves and
other children, but their little trick may
upset q freight train of conversation for
the sake of battered witticism. ...
wish to refer to two eminent authori-
ties Now be so good as to listen. The
great moralist says, "to trife with the vo-
cabulary which is the vehicle of social in
tercourse is to tamper with the currency
of human intelligence. He who would
violate the sanctities of his mother tongue
would invade the recesses of the paternal
till without remorse, and repeat the BAN
quet of Saturn without an indigestion"
And, once more, listen to the historian.
-"The Puritans hated puns. The Bish-
ops were VIGOROUSLY addicted to them.
The Lords Temporal carried them to the
verge Of license Majesty itself must have
its Royal bubble. 'Ye be burly my Lord
of Burleigh, said Queen Elizabeth, but ye
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
The Gift of Tritemius.
BY j. O. WHITTIER.

Tritemius of Herbipolis one day,
While kneeling at the affairs foot to pray
Alone with God, as was his pious choice,
Heard from beneath miserable voice
A sound that seemed of all things sad to tell,
As of lost soul crying out OF hell.
Thereat the Abbot rose, the chain whereby
His thoughts went upward broken by that
cry,
And, looking from the easement, saw below
wretched woman, with gray hair allow,
And withered hands stretched up to him,
who cried
For aims as one who might not be denied.
She cried: "For the dear love Of Him who
gave
His life for ours, my child from bondage save,
Ny beautiful brave tirst-born, chained with
In the Moor's galley, where the sun-smit
waves
Lap the white walls of Tunis p ''What can
| give" Tritemius said-smy prayers" 80
man
Of God!' she cried, for grief had made her
bold,
"Mock me not so; ask not prayers, but
gold
Words cannot serve me, aims alone suffice ;
Even while plead, perchance my tirst-born
dies
"Woman" Tritemius answered, "from our
door
None go unfed; hence are we always poor.
single soldo is our only store
Thou hast our prayers, what can we give
thee more?'
"Give me,' she said, "the silver candle
sticks
On either side of the great cruci6x
God well may spare them on his errandssped,
Or He can give you golden ones instead
Then said Tritemius, Given as thy word,
Woman, so be it and Our gracious Lord,
Who loveth mercy more than sacrifice,
Pardon me if a human soul prize
Above the gifts upon His altar piled
Take what thou askest, and redeem thy
child -
But his hand trembled as the holy aims
He laid within the beggars's palms;
And as she vanished down the linden shade,
He bowed his head and for forgiveness pray
ed.
So the day passed and when the twilight
came
He rose to find the chapel all adame,
And, dumb with grateful wonder, to behold
Upon the altar candlesticks of gold
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Watches, Jewelry, &c.
GOLD w TCHES, ~

iE5a Jrw E1Ry. &c. So
We take this occasion to INFORM our friends
and all those in search of superior time
keeper-that we have now in store one OF
the best assortments Of
GOLD WATCHES
ever before offered by us, consisting of
PLAIN AND FULL JEWELLED GOLD
HUNTING LEVERS,
Do do do do and Enamel
Hunting Ladies' do.
Do do do Silver Hunting and
Single Case Levers,
Gold and Silver Hunting and Single Case
Cylinder Watches,
Do Hunting, REAL T. F. Cooper Duplex
Watches,
Also, Ladies Fine Enamel and Diamond Set
Watches,
New and splendid assortment of FINE GoLD
Fruit Frosted Ear Rings and Pins,
Chatelaine Chain Guards, Fob and Vest
Chains,
Gold, Steel and Silver Spectacles,
Gold Thimbles and Finger Seals,
Seals, Keys, Medalions and Charms,
Gold, Silver and Pearl Card Gases,
Ship Chronometers for sale and on hire,
Gold and Shell Eye Glasses,
Gold and Silver Pencils with pens, something
new and good,
Plated Cake, Fruit and Card Baskets,
Plated Casters, Spoons, Forks, Asparagus
Crumb, Fish and Pie Knives, Silver Tea Sets,
Forks, Spoons, Cups, Goblets, Cream and Su-
gar Pots, Ladies', &C.,
With an unusual stock of every variety OF
fancy and desirable goods All of which will
be sold cheap for cash.
oc3 J. NJ. FREEMAN.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

The FRENCHMAN's REvENGE.-The
following anecdote became current during
the suspensions of specie payments in the
financial crisis of 1887:
A Frenchman rushed into one of the
banks, soon after the general suspen-
sion, with hundred dollar bill in his
hand, and demanded the specie for it.
Ffenclmaa-Vill you pay ziz bill Viii
you give me re monnaie?
3 1eNer-(b landly.)- have sus-
pended, and cannot redeem it at pres
ent.
F'enchmMa-Suspends ! Watts Eat p
Hang by re neck, like one thieving dog :?
Oh, no, sare You no deceive me
sare will ave d'orr Pargent-what
you call re gold-the silvare-ze cop
pare
TeNer--Ne will redeem our notes when
other banks redeem theirs.
E'enchmaaa-When re oder banks re-
dim zares. By gar, re oder banks say re
same, sare. will shoot you sare-viz 70
pistols, re gun, re cannon, sare
Ieza'-You had better wait, sir-you
had better keep cool.
E'enchman (excitedly)-I will not wait
I not keep-vat you call? cold ? | will
ave reoe,age. Sare! tear your paper
note all in leetle piece / chew him i
(suiting the action to the word) | spit on
him !! spit on him! You loo-ooze your
teetIe billet motel They sare-I am re-
venge ! am, r-r-repenge!
Having destroyed the note, looking
full defiance at the cashier, tellers and all
others present, the little Frenchman
stalked out of the bank, with the air of a
Napoleon.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

A SHORT STORY BY DICKENs.--Dick-
ems tells the following story of an Amer
lean sea captain. Brooklyn Times.
On his last voyage home the captain
had on board lady of remarkable per-
sonal attractions-a phrase | use as one
being entirely new, and one you never
meet with in the newspapers. The young
lady was beloved intensely by five young
gentlemen passengers, and III return she
was in love with them all very ardently
but without any particular preference for
either Not knowing how to make up
her determination in this dilemma, she
consulted my friend the captain The
captain, being man Of an original turn
Of mind, says to the young lady. "Jump
overheard, and marry the man who
jumps after you" The young lady,
struck with the idea, and being naturally
fond of bathing especially in warm wealth
er, as it then was, took the advice of the
captain, who had boat manned in case
of accident. Accordingly, next morning,
the five lovers being on deck, and looking
devotedly at the young lady, she plunged
int the sea head foremost. Four of the
lovers Immediately jumped in after her.
When the young lady and her four low
ers were got out again, she says to the
captain: "What am l to do with them
now, they are all so wet p Says the
captain, 'take the dry one!" And the
young lady did, and she merried him.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

A HYPooR1TE.-The Nashville Tenn
Gazette tells of a Irregular licensed preach
er," who recently ran off from that
city, taking with HIM a married woman
hot his wife. He had refused situa-
ton few days before, because a person
with whom he would have to associate
was addicted to profane swearing This,
we think, was putting rather too fine a
point upon it. -
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
SUNDRIES.

WIN. ID. ROBERTS & CO., Roa-
w noke Square have just received full
supply of the following articles, to which we
invite the attention of the public.
patterns, alright Wood Stoves, Coal Stoves,
open and close of all styles, Block Tin Coffee
Pots and Urns, with strainers, Chatting
dishes, Japaned cake boxes, Tea Canisters,
Spittoons, Lanters, Lamps of all kinds, and
for all purposes, Coal Scuttles, Cistern Force
and Deep Well Pumps.
Also rs boxes j. C. l4x20 Roofing Tin.
rs do j. G. lOxl4 bright do,
Block Tin, Zinc, Sheet Copper, bar and
sheet Lead, sheet Iron, &c.,s ETHEREAL Oil, by
the Dbl. or gallon, Tin Ware Of every descrip
ton at Wholesale and retail no IL.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
pUTTER-Ora County of best quail
ID ty, for sale by ...-..-.
oc IA GEO. X. GOODRIDGE.
Jordan's Vegetable Cough
OR COLD KILLER

OR COLD KILLER.
60 N P OSED 0 r FL r T b e N
DURELY VEGETABLEi ingredients, a safe
L and pleasant remedy for Coughs, Colds,
Influenza, Hoarseness, Whooping Cough,
Consumption, Pain and Soreness of the breast,
Difficulty of Breathing, and all diseases OF
the lungs and breast
JORDAN'S VEGETABLE COUGH
CANDY OR COLD KILLER.
Is preparation endowed with the highest
curative properties. Numerous cases of
Coughs, Colds, Influenza and Hoarseness have
been cured by its use. 1t will however, take
more or less time to effect cure where the
cough, &C., is of long standing, but perse-
verence will secure the desired effect, and
restore the diseased organs to their former
tone and vigor. 1t is composed entirely of
products of the vegetable kingdom, prepared
by skillful chemist, so as to possess in
concentrated degree, the active principles of
the vegetables employed to the rejection of
their useless and inert constituents
Manufactured by G. Jordan d Son, and for
sale by }. R. HATHAWAY,
G. W. DEFY & co.
l.. W. WEBB,
j. r. LUDLOW d CO.,
nod THOS. NASH, Jr.,
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
NORFOLK FLOUR STORE.
No. 7, Union Street.

TNHE first and only establishment of this
Il description ever opened in the city. The
design of the subscriber is to have constantly
on hand, every thing in the line of Breadstutfs
of the best qualities, always fresh and at the
latest prices. Having the exclusive agency
for the City Block Mills, Baltimore, he can
always furnish the following Breadstutfs:
Wilson Il Canby's Excelsior Flour, family,
Extra and Super, in barrels and sacks of
SO and 40 lbs.
Graham, or Dyspeptic Flour, in 40 lbs. sacks.
Middlings and Rye Flour, in barrels and 40
lbs. sacks.
Buckwheat, in sacks of 2419 and 40 lbs.
Corn Meal, in l & bushel sacks,
Mill Feed, in bushel bags Wholesale and
Retail.
N8~ These Breadstuffs are manufactured
expressly for Family use, and warranted.
Any article not giving satisfaction is request
ed to be returned.
TERMS Cash on-delivery.
E. A. ABBOTT,
oc 26 No. 7, Union street.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
rs Cents Pair for Indian Rubber
Over Shoes.

10 VCHtS q d1T IUT ITIUIdT ItUUUtT
Over Shoes.
WE have received a very large mSbg
w lot of Indian Rubbers, that y
are little damaged by being lit SkAs.
tie blistered on the bottoms though the bis
tiers do them little injury it enabled us to buy
them very cheap and that will enable US to
make living profit, and sell them at
Is CENTS A PAIR FOR CASH.
The Sizes are from to No. IA, large
enough we should think to fit the most ex-
tensive feet. Then we have those that are
perfect, that can be warranted to be excellent
both for Ladies and Gents. Please give us
a call and let us be instrumental in keeping
your feet dry, one great help to good health
All for Cash at No. As, Main Street, Norfolk
Va, and 80, High Street, Portsmouth Va.
oc27 BUTT q DOUGLASS.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Rates of Advertising.

l square of 10 lines or less, one Insertion, SOC
Each subsequent insertion, 20 C.
l square week, l,a5
| square l month, 800
| {. months, 500
l =" months, 1000
All advertisements ordered twice or
thrice week, for each insertion
after the first, per square, 37H C.
Contracting Rates.
l square, renewable at pleasure, per
annum, payable monthly, $4,000
Each additional square, per annum, 1000
Professional Cards, mot exceeding five
lines, per annum, in advance, 1900
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
r aides Shanghai Morocco Boots,
IL LADIES MOROCCO BOOTS,

LADIES KID BOOTS.
We have large assortment of the above
goods, just arrived, per Adams u Cos Ex-
press, and made in Philadelphia, Also,
large stock of goat Bootees. All the above
goods will be sold at the lowest Cash prices.
These are fresh and seasonable goods. La
dies will please call at No. 8, East Side, Mar
ket Square.
oc II L. l.. BRICKHOUSE.
A SMALL lot of choice Hams, retailing
"a at 20 cts. b
ocl2 JAS. E. JONES.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

T ARGE ASSORTMENT TRUNKS
IL just received. Trunks Trunks,
From manufactures of Trunks
Trunks will and must be sold,
Every one in want of Trunks should call
at No. 9, Market Square.
VALISES.
Sole Leather Valises, Sole Leather Valises.
Valises, Bellows Tap Valises and various
other styles, every possible style of valise
that is now in use, just from the largest manu-
facturer. We are very anxious to sell. Please
call at No. 9, East Side Market Square.
l.. L. BR1CKHOUSE,
oct n Norfolk, Va.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
SERVANTS Shoes.

Servants Shoes.
WE have superior lot of these rpSap
w Goods this fall, which were w$@
made to our order. Some of them are ~.
very heavy and strong, both for Men, and
Women's wear. We feel confident that we
can giyea good article to all who will try
our goods, but as the styles are varied being
adapted to the various occupations of Ser
wants, we would be glad if our customers
would always specify what kind and style
they may wish to have furnished their ser
wants, so that they get the article best adapt
ed to each ones wear.
oc2. f. W SEARURY a. SON.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

Goods proportionably low-also, good lot
of Superior Cloths, Cassimeres and Vestings
which he will make at reduced prices and
warrant good trimming-m and fit or you
need not take them. Remember at
F. A. HARMS, No. 10 Main Street.
oc3
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
NORELAND & JAKEMAN,
lY HOIISE. SHIP AND SIGN

NT ORELAND & JAKEMAN,
Xl HOUSE, SHIP AND SIGN
PAINTERS.
No. 1, Roanoke Square.
NORFOLK, VA.
TO THE PUBLIC.
Hail honored ages of grand progression,
While each one clings to his profession,
And science moves with onward motion,
To suit each hayward thought and notion,
Bringing to light, some new invention,
More strange than modern wit can mention,
Or genius paint with true endeavor,
Though making graphic strides forever,
While reason urges proud ambition,
To strive for wondrous competition;
Yet in this age of glorious Art,
We can the need Of praise impart,
When meritorious efforts claim
A modest puff to gild the name,
And thus we call with honest pride,
Attention to the Painters Side,
Two men who bravely know their calling,
Whose works are worthy of extoling,
Two model artists of the day,
And most obliging in their way,
Moreland a. Jakeman--mark the name,
In Roanoke street you'll find the same,
Call at their shop number one,
You'll get the best of Painting done,
And whether Foe, Friend, or neighbor,
THEY'LL charge but moderate for their labor,
So now invite each one and all,
So walk around, and give them call.
oc 25-6m
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Rates of Advertising.
SDeCial Notices.

Rates of Advertising.
Special Notices.
square, time, 75e
square, 10 lines or less, l week, y 800
" 100
" F." ] month, 1000
l year, 1000
For each additional sqr, per annum, 1000
For announcing Candidates for Of
fee, in advance, 500
Marriages and Deaths to be published as news.
Obituaries, Funeral Notices, &C., will be
charged as other advertisement, and pay mont
required in advance.
All transient advertisements to be paid in
advance.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

VIZ III. BUCK,
w No. lO3 &c los Church street, Norfolk.
Dealer in Porter, Ale, Cider, and Superior
Mineral Waters. Fine Draft Ale always on
hand.
oc 3
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
Business Cards.

ID III. EDMONDS,
II. PLASTERER AND STA TER
Respectfully solicts shere of public patro-
mage. Architectural Plaster Ornaments of
the latest style, and at the lowest prices.
Particular attention paid to Slate roof re
pairing.
g~ Residence, No. 80, North Cumber-
land Street.
oct CIV
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

EECHES-Just received fresh sup
II ply of recently imported and healthy
Swedish Leeehes, for sale by
oc3 M. A. SANTOS.
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

THE Attention of Gentlemen,
Il desiring to purchase their
FALL AND WINTER CLOTHING,
Is respectfully called to the large and II
we'll selected stock of READY MADE M
GOODS, which ! have now on hand; ILL.,
Being encouraged by the liberal share of
patronage | have received since the estab-
lishment Of my
NEW CLOTHING HOUSE,
have laid in another stock of the most
fashionable goods that could be gotten up in
the most reasonable prices with the fixed de-
termination not to be undersold by any one.
N. BAUM,
Oc % Union Hall, Main Street
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

VIM. A. GRAVES,
SHIPWRIGHT, SPAR MAKER AND
CAIILKER.
SECTIONAL MARINE RAIL WAY,
STEAM SA W MILL AND TIMBER
MANUFA Glory,
No. &C, Wide Water Street, Nor
folk, Va.
Mg~ N. B. BUILDING MA TERLALS
FURNISHED AT SHORT NOTICE.
oct Sly
~ MAYER,
VI, DEALER IN
Watches, Jewelry, Silver, Plated Ware, &c.
No. IS, Main Street
oc3 NORFOLK, VA.
w and retail
G. R O G E R S,
No. 3, CampbeIPs Wharf,
NORFOLK, TA.,
oc IA
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01
BARGAINS! BARGAlNS!!
ID AT F. KARN'S CLOTHING STORE.
No. 10 Main Street.

Look to your own interests and save at
least 10 per cent by buying your clothing at
F. A. KARN'S, he is now selling off the
balance of his Winter Stock at Cost, for
Cash only and at the following low nrices
The day book. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 1857-1867, 1857-12-01

DROWN and refined sugar of all grades,
ID which we are selling very low.
GEO. X. GGODRIDGE,
oc IA No. 6, CampbelPs wharf.