The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1857-10-28
How Sut. Lovegood Exploded.
HIS EXPERIENCE wIrH SODA POWDERS.

Il
aa HIS EXPERIENCE WITH SODA POWDERS.
Sut. related the story thus: "George
did you ever see Sicily Burns? Her dad
Hives at the Ratil Snaik Springs, nigh to
the Georgy line.' Yes, 8 very hand
some girl .Handsomel that wurd don't
kiver the case; it sounds like callin' good
whisky water, when ys ar at Big Spring
and the still house ten miles off, an hit q
rainin,' and yer flask only half FULL, She
shows amung wimen like sunaower as
compared to dog-fennel an smart weed an
ljimsen. But thar amt no use tryin' to
4 describe her. Couldn't crawl thru q
whisky barrel with both heads stove out,
|if it were hilt study for her, and good
! footholt at that. She weighs just two
hundred aud twenty six pounds, and stands
sixteen hands high. She never got in, an
arm chair in her life, an yer can lock the
top hoop of churn ur a big dog collar
round her waist. I've seed her jump
over the top of split bottom cheer, an
! never show her ankis or ketch her dress
tontoi it. She kerried devil enuf about her
to fll four hoss waggin led, with skin
! as white as the inside of q frog stool,
cheeks and lips as red as pearche''s gills
in dogwood blossom time; in sieh smile!
Oh, be drafted eff its any use talkin.
That gal could make nue. murder old Bishop
Il Soul hisself, or kill nam not to speak Of
= dad, eff she jist limited that she wanted
sich thing dan 's's7 st.' 'iil'
We'll, to tell it at onstt, she war o ga
all over, from the pint OF her toe nails in
the longest har on the hest knob, oY hel
! head gal all the time. everywhere and
I that ovl the excitinist kind. Ov course ]
lleaned tn her as close as I dar tu, and In
spite Of long legs, appetite fur whisky, my
s shurt scrape, and dads actin hoss, SIT
: sorter leaned tu me, and was begiunin
Ito think ! wur jist the greatest and com
!, fortablest man on yearth, not exceptil
Old Buck or Brigham Young, with all hi
J, Iradii cullered, wrinkled wimmin, cradle
! full of babies, an his Big Salt Lake thrown
q in. Well wuncea cussed, deceivin' }ialav
It erin stinkin' Yankee peddler, all jack
!, ,Iknife and jaw, cum to ole man Burnses
i'|.with load ov apple Iarers, calliker, rib
5, bins, jcwsharps an sody-powders. No,
IS mind, I'd never hern tell ov that true
lafore. an be burned ef + don't want
! to be the last--wus NOR rifle. power m
!, nor perkusSion-three times as smart, an
le hurts wus, heap wus. Durn him. Dur
> all Yankee peddlers, and durn tteir prin
IL cipils and practises, say. Iwish ha
all the sody powder they ever made in hi
p cussed paunch, an slow match fixed t
1t him, an had chunk Of FIRE, the feiIe
4 what found piece ov him big enough
: feed cockrosch ought .u be King pv tn
4 Sultan harem .. thousand years for b
afluck. They amt human beins', nohoY
The mint at Filadelfy is thar Heaven; the
ut think their God eats. half dimes fur breal
e. fust, hashes the leavins fur dinner, an
!" "iswallers cent an dried apil for snppe
sets on stampin machin' fur q thron
ee sleeps ON, crib, full of half dollars, an
d. measures men like money, bycount, 1The
ed hain't one ov them got a soal but what kr
dance jig in kabbagc seed. and leal
ed room for the fiddler. .oow u "a 1890
ut .Well, Sicily, she bought tin box I
nd the sody from him, and hid it away fro
I'd her folks, q sayin' it for me.ss happen
ed pass next day, ov course I stopped toe
If Joy q look ct theaetempter, and sheIw
a mighty luxin to me. put one arm reai
tle my neck, an tother wun whar the ,circi
,o1 gle goes roun q hoss, Tux the 'inturn
,at me with her left foot an gin me kis
M Says she Satty love- I've got somethi
fur ye, a new sensashun'7- believed
for I begun tn feel it already. Myao
Ifelt like little MINERS wur niblin at e
cold, streak run up an down my ba
ow like a lizzard with a turkey hen after h
ely in settin' time, my heart felt hot and o
1t satisfied like. and then I'D cut ole Sou
to throat eff she'd limited at needsisity t
of sich an operashun. Then she poured
red or twelve blue papers ov the sody inter
snt big tumbler, aud about the same numb
be of white wuns inter tother tumbler, an p
t it nigh onto pint Of water on both ov the
put an stirred 'em both up with case Eni
are lookin' as solemn as ole jackass in o snt
an Storm when the folders all gin out. s
md hilt wun while she told me to drink tnth,
,he swallowed Il at wan rum tasted 'sal
es- fike thought lit wuf part of the sens
tshan. But Il were mistakened; all oy I
cussed Internal sensashun wur to cum,
lit wurnt long at it.. hoss, you'd bells
the me Then she gin me luther tumbl
,t;c and sent it after the fust, race h
e,eh
b In about wun moment an half, T. 81
Ed swallered thrashin machin incl
{ of blast, 4ur couple. of bull dogs, an ii
and had sot inter ftin.ssaI I seed that "
the cotched agin-same family dispersitioh
the make cussed fools of themselyesIes
the chance-so ] broke for my hoss, Ist
J B. a look back an thar Sicily lay on. her b
en- in the porch, sereamin' with lafins,
rom heels mp In thelair. q kickin' oy 'em toge
The er like she war tFyip' to kick her s
Van pers off. But lshad mo time tn look I'll
mo- an thur wur q roadsof foam frum the ho
-, kLo