Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1857-08-26
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MRS. DICKS0N'S NEW PETTlCOAT.

A meek quiet looking person, calling himself
John Dickson, .was detected on Friday in the
Yery act of stealing a large roll Of red flannel
from the. door of a dry goods: store in Eighth
street, He did not deny the fact, but attempt
edsto palliate his offence by the following ad-
dress to the Mayor: ..s-.
tsSir,I confess I did. take the ,fannin, but
whenyeu hear why took it, you will say that
I am an unfortunate man, and ought to be piticd.
My wifeisays to me yesterday morning.:
" John I've got two 'dollar'note, Bank OF
Harrisburg, (says she,) I made it by washing
AID ironing, and want you to go and buy me
eight yards of tiannin-red hannin (says>she)-
to, make me two pctticoats, for the spring is
backwards (says shc) and the weather Keeps
cool, and I haven't rag that's fit to wear. And
mind you don't lose the money nor 60 near any
grog shop, (says she) for you know your weak
ness and don't you get into conversation with
any other loafers as you are going along on TINS
$50 todk aiis noney-,ths two dollar note.
Il did,r-and set out, and went three squares
around to keep clear of the groggery that'sse
the Upper end of our street; and that's the'way
T missed it for in the other street met Joe
Hfnson. Says joe
"sJack where you're bound? 2"
Says I-a,To get eight yards of quarter dol
lar fannin, to make my wife two petticoatS.
sSays he-aDock the old woman half a yard,
and let's have couple Of glasses of ,toddy. Its
only making the petticoats little shorter, (says
he,) and as she's got a handsome pair of ankles
she won't mind having a scant pattern"
"Wel, + thought half yard Of fannin'
wouldn't make muck difference, so in we went
to the hotel, changed the note, drank-a glass
apiece, and that put US in the notion OF more,
lit did and Joe drank and drank, and in less
than an hour I'll be switched if had twenty
FIVE cents left out of two dollars. Well, what
could do then2 axany reasonable man
what could do? Icouldn't go home without
tho fannin and couldn't buy it without the
money. So Il hooked bolt of it, q did, that's
q fact, and Pm not ashamed to acknowledge 1t,
for nothing else could be done; and if hadn't
been nabbed; my ole woman should have had
six red flannel pttticoats instead of the two she
sent me after; and that's the whole story"
Dickson was committed in default Of bail to
answer for the larceny.-Phtladetphta Sunday
Mercury.
DIcxEy AND SusEr.-Dickey was poor-and
Susey had rich mother-Dickey loved Susey,
and rice rcrsa-Dickey wanted to marry Susey
mother was down on that measure -Dickey
was forbid the premises-notes were exchanged
through knot hole in the high board fence that
enclosed the yard. One day the old lady went
out calling and Dickey was duly informed OF
the fact-called on Susey-remained little too
long-old lady was close at hand-Dickey had
no chance Of escape without detection-at the
instance of Susey, Dickey popped into the closet
old lady saw that Susey looked confused
guessed that Dickey had been about, but sup
posed, of course, he had made good his escape
Thought perhaps that c,young couple hadagreed
to slope Observation-Disclosures to be too smart
for accordingly, shut Susey up in the
same closet where Dickey was concealed, and
giving her a pair of quilts and pillow, locked
her up for the night-didn't see Dickey-next
morning went to the closet to let Susey out
cob, Lord pa scrcam-couldn't get breath
for moment. Finally
''Ahem! Dckey, is that you 2"
eyes ma'am.n': -.
eAhem !-ahcm well, Dicaey-"...
"Susey, dear, go and see about breakfast" )"
IErft SGsty.fs . : :
"sWell, Dickey."
"Ma'am,n
"Dickey, you must stay to breakfast"
"Coufdn't ma'am",s, =:
"Oh, but you Hlnst:P -: :. -. =.
tDickey concludes to stay.l
Breakfast Table-"D Dickey, have been think
ing about you great deal lately"
$50 suppose, laa'am, very lately"
"You are industrious and honest, hear"
81 never brag, ma'am."
"Well, now, upon the whole, Dickey, Ihink
you and Sasy he'd better get married"