Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1857-06-18

no one would have believed the little dried.
up body capahle-she held on to him. For
tunately the scene lasted but few moments,
not even long enough for his companions
(who perhaps didn't hurry themselves) to
come to the rescue, for the valiant foe either
considering the very elegant, but frail young
man beneath his notice, or scorning to make
the innocent suffer for the guilty, after ma
king few abortive attempts to get at Mrs.
Twitter, turned suddenly round and left the
store. After waiting few minutes, with
out relaxing her grasp Of the kicking clerk,
to be sure that the coast was clear, she emer-
ged from behind her unwilling, and now
infuriated protector, and while adjusting her
bonnet, and shawl, began thanking him for
his kindness, declaring that, "she didn't
know what she aoould have done, if it hadn't
been for hinl-she did believe that the vicious
cretur would killed her"
"You needn't thank me madam" cried
the furious clerk, "but you may thank hea-
ven that you are not man, instead of a
withered old witch, for if you were, would
not leave life enough in you to crawl out of
that door,"
"Why what upon the earth does this
natomy mean ?" cried the astonishod old la
dy, to whom it had evidently not once oc-
CURED that the young man had anything to
complain of; and walking close up to him,
she gazed curiously into his face, and see-
ing something there, which in connection
with his words, aroused her, she poured out
the vials of her wrath, (Which she had pru-
IDENTIFY kept bottled up during her affray with
the goat) upon the clerks devoted head.
"You," said she, "to talk about what
you'd do with n,an-you, whose breeches
look like they'd be tight fit on wharf.rat
who don't cast as big shadow as my old
cat does, and aint got half as much spunk
may be you think that because I'm afraid of
goats, that I'm afraid of monkeys too, but
you're mistaken-a dozen of you couldn't
scare me; why you're so contemplate look
ing, that even that old goat scorped to butt
at you. Talk about "old witches" you long,
lankey, half:starved looking pairof tongs, to
run down people that does look like people"
And here the old lady fairly broke down,
being perfectly exhausted by her double ex-
citement and the owner of the store (who
had been engaged in an adjoining room, set
tling some business with Mr.. Pendarvis, who
was then unknown to Mrs. Twitter and fam
ily) stepped forward, and Offering the old
lady chair, he dispatched the offending
clerk to another part of the store, and then
apolgized for him, admitting his want of
sense; indeed, agreeing to everything she
said, including her opinion that he ought to
send off every one of them grinning clerks,
and do his business himself; and he sym
pathized with her so sincerely in the goat
scrape, declaring his determination to petit
ton the Town Council to forbid the appear
ance Of such monsters in the street. "Yes,"
eagerly exclaimed the now grati6ed old lady,
'and while you're about it, say something
about the COWS too, for I can't walk the street
in any peace for them, and I expect nothing
else but I'll be hooked up, and carried off by
one of them yet" And here another of the
clerks drew on himself lightning glance
Of anger, for the idea of the old lady impaled
on one of the horns of cow, or seated be-
tween them both, with her bonnet bobbipg
on her back, her broad cap frill standing out,
the inimitable bow performing extraordinary
antics on the top of her head, and herself
kicking and screaming as she was borne away,
was too much for him, and he burst into a
perfect explosion of laughter, in which the
merchant came so near Joining that he had
to feigp great anger, to excuse his turning
away from Mrs. Twitter, to reprimand the
clerk in pantomime, not daring to speak.
"And the dogs" she continued, "Pm GER
tain that one of them will go mad, and bite
me in these very streets there's the
horses, that men aoiH hitch by the side walks,
just on purpose to wheel round and kick my
brains out, and dis6gure me for life"
And here the last clerk-who had nearly
established his character as a gentleman in
the estimation of Mrs. Twitter by his cor
rect demeanor-perpetrated so unmistakea.
bic litter, that the old lady exclaiming,
"They're all FOOLS" left the store in great
disgust.
1t might be supposed that Miss Dorcas
would have endeavored to escape all partici.
patton in this decidedly ungenteel affair, by
walking quietly home; as his goatship had
taken no notice of her, and she would gladly
have done so, but she knew that her aunt
would make it point to advortize her share
in the adventure, by enquiriug for her at ev.
, cry store in the street, making comments at
the same time on her cowardly disappearance,
, besides giving her ga piece of her mind
when she got home. So wisely concluding
"to bear the ills she had," she waited for hel
t in the street, and pleaded her own excessive
fright, and consequent confusion of mind
as an excuse for not appearing on the field
r of battle.
t "Well it acas enough to scare any body,
admitted her aunt, "for it fairly out-done
: me-"
And on their way home, she gave Miss
, Dorcas all the particulars We have related
while that young lady listened sympathizing
, ly, and thought to herself; "How horribly
ungenteel"
At dinner, Mrs. Twitter regaled her hus
| bond with an account of the adventnre prai