Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1857-09-02

| admire nay, that is too cold word
Il love the mice grill" Under every
condition, every aspect, save one-that
one is the condition of matrimony.-
When l hear that one of the 'nice grls''
of my acquaintance is ab ut 10 be mar
ried-about 10 be monopolized by some
jealous beast with whiskers, and an ugly
sister " no is to be bridesmaid, become
faint and sick at heart. Where "nice
girls" dwell, it should be written up, as
on gates of choice gardens, ''Do not pick
the flowers" Oh, it is horrid, horrid,
to see that spruce gentleman cone in
and take her away into corner for the
rest OF the evening. may not waltz
with her now; l may not catch her at
blind mans Iuff; l Eay not sit by her
and turn over the leaves as she sings,
"Auld Robin Gray" even though it
were Christmas time; may no more
kiss her under the mistletoe; / may not
look at aer There is that horrid spruce
man with whiskers, glowering at me as
if he would eat me. l sigh as the re-
membrance comes over me of the many
mice girls" who have thus been torn
ruthlessly from me by spruce, and, am
sure, stupid men in whiskers. Why are
there such things as spruce men with
whiskers? l am sure we would get on
much better without them.
cannot bear TO think of ''nice girl'
getting married. cannot contemplate
with patience wlat she is about to be-
come? She is about to become the
slave of one man. In less than year
her figure will be eternally spoiled. In
less than year she will wear sloppy
dresses and wrappers Of morning
She will leave eff gaiters, and her stock
ings will hang loose. She will loose her
bloom in her cheek, and the merry
twinkle IN her eye. She will have ba-
by, and smell sour. Imay say cannot
tSntemplate this spectacle with patience.
! nee visited one, who had been "nice
";rl," year or two after her marriage.
Tie figure which she presented shock
ed me. l could have cried with vexa-
tion; and l am sure if her husband had
come in, Ishould kicked him. ! have re-
solved never to go through such an cr-
deal again. When ''nice girl" mar
ries now, l have done with her forever
You may wonder why, since | am
such an admirer of mice girls L have
never made one my own-why, in fact,
have never married one. l loved, ad
mired, and adopted them too much for
that. | cou,duomore marry "n;ce girl"
than could willfully trample down a
bed Of flowers. have all my life con
sidered it, and do still cousiner it, a
crime, little short Of sacrilege, to marry
"nice girl" Who but savage would
deface beautiful piece of sculpture?
Who, but wretch, would stand 10 the
fire and monopoliz, all the heat? To
the man who attempts to marry "nice
girl" 1 say as Dilgones said to Alexan-
der. "Gat out of my SUM-"
Marry "nice grip Never! l know
what it would be. No man is hero to
his vaLst deckamJer, and no hu,blnd, l
am sure, is fine fellow in his wife's
eyes after she has mended his socks and
put patches on his drawers. On the
other hand, am certain there must be a
horrid disenchantment about a skimp
Aannel petticoat, and a cotton night cap
with frills
NJ, let the 'nice girl alone" Let
her be the life and sunshine of Home"
for ever. Let as many hearts pine away
and die for her as VII; am ready to
pine and die with the rest. But, oh,
change not Miss into Mrs.! rob her not
of her girlishness and simplicity; pollute
not the gushing fountain Of her love,
which flows for all, and falls Ike dew
upon the world. Let her be a "nice
girl'' forever: for such as she never
grows old, or loose The power to charm.
If you must marry, marry tho beauty
The f,rt-lhe clever girl the dashing
girl-any kind Of girl. but leave me, oh,
leave me the the "nice girl" For her
sake, will live blchelor 10 the end of
my days; and when | die, desire moth
ing better than to have such one watch
over ME and close my eyes.
T|a-rSac rnDDvcnnznDSYO