The western Democrat. [volume] (Charlotte, N.C.) 1852-1870, 1857-09-08
A. CHAPTER ON MArR1MoNY.

A CHAPTER ON MATRIMONY.
A young lady out West. in communica-
ton to the Sandusky Register upon the
subject of matEimony. says
at is a mournfai fact that this world is
full Of young men who want to marry. but
daro not. Deny this, as some will, it is
nevertheless true, as We can very easily
show. la this town, for instance, there are
some thirty or forty young men, well-to-do
in the way of business and salaries, and vet
refuse to take, the step which they all
want to take, but do not. Why! The
large majority of them have salaries rang
ing from five hundred to seven hundred
dollars year. Now the first question to
be asked by any sane man, is, can I pro-
perly support wife, if take one! Then
he counts the cost of living as the woman
Of his preference would wish, and 10 he
finds to his amazement, that his income is
vastly too small to support even a modest
modern establishment; and, somewhat mad
dened by the reflection, he plunges into
labor and courts business with an assiduity
that takes away his health eventually, in
hopes of attaining an income that shall
enable him to marry, and have home of
his own. And this is the secret of the hard.
unending toll of the young men Of to day,
who are fast approaching thirty years of
age-this is the reason of SO many disap-
pointed men and waiting women, deny or
hide it as you may.
but, says some good woman, you do us
injustice for any woman who truly loves a
man will adopt herself to his circumstances
with the greatest pleasure. But what man
Ofany sensitiveness, or high sense of honor,
would take a woman from easy circum-
stances. and pleasant and we'll furnished
home, to adorn his four little rooms. and
to do his house work, as the first principles
of economy would demand of him Few
will do it; for, though the woman signifies
her willingness to take up with such ex-
perence, we are all such creatures of
circumstances. that there would be COM
planning on her part, eventually, and
sickness from over-exertion, unhappiness
from many cares-all of which would render
marriage anything else than pleasant. And
SO the young man very wisely think-pre-
ferring few years of single loneliness. in
order to obtain money enough to support
modest house of between twelve and fifteen
hundred dollars per year expense, rather
than to place modestly educated woman
into the house of six handred a year, where
she must do her own house work.
''Now, what is the remedy? Plainly
that women must fit themselves to be such
wives as the young men must have. Else
the young men must fit themselves to be
such husbands as women want, and spend
the very choicest years of their life in the
dismal drudgery of ceaseless toll, break
ing down health, happiness, energy, only
to give themselves up to marriage when the
best of their manhood is gone. The women
must choose for themselves which it shall
be, for the matter is solely in their hands.
Let mothers say to their daughters, Put on
that calico gown; take charge of this house,
hold and fit yourself to become a wife cad
mother. Let the young women cheerfully
to such service; and instead of
all thought, and time, and money
upon the adoenmsnt of the body, seek to
accustom the hands to proper industry,
and to school the mind to proper tastes
Then there will be no longer complaint that
young men can't afford to marry and we
shall have beautiful, modest houses all
and all life, once more, have
of the truthfulness and virtue
which it had in the days of our blessed
fathers and mothers, when it was woman's
ambition to become the head of the house,
and the mother of noble children"