Smyrna times., 1857-02-18
Written for the Smyrna Times,
r. SpY--A Life Incident. 81

Mr.. Editor The question has been asked
SO often 8" Who is Spy ?"'" Who is Spy!'' bat
has hitherto remained unanswered and might
long continue SO, if he had kept within the
bounds Of moderation in his structures on the
fashions, which the ladies have seen fit in their
better judgment to adopt his last communica-
ton, however, has so far transcribed the bounds
Of prudence and moderation, that "forbearance
ceases to be virtue" shall not name the
gentleman, but will give little incident in his
history. Spy is now about forty years of age,
is bachelor, and it was thought by myself and
all his friends and acQuaintances that he would
so remain; for, notwithstanding oil the charms
and beauty Of the fair portion Of creation with
whom he came in contact, he remained olsen
thralied and unmoved, until it was concluded
that he was perfect Sebastopol or Gibraltar,
and that no lady, with all her allies, would ever
cause him to surrender, and further, that nature
in his formation, in lieu of heart, had given
him gizzard,-but G it is long tide that never
turns, and thus it was with Mr.. Spy. In the
course of events, it became his fortune, or rather
rnis-fortune, to become deeply smitten with a
fair lady, and, would you believe it, she was
attired in small bonnet, and was encased, as
he is pleased to term it, in hoopS,-he loved,
and, his dcmeanor being changed, paid all the
attentions and passed through all the etiquette
which are customary on such occasions, until
he was induced to believe that the affection he
entertained for bis fair one was reciprocated !;
in due time, he embraced favorable opportu-
nifty, and approached the object Of his affection,
and, on bended knee, made his declaration in
helanguage of that eloquence which love alone
inspires; the fair one listened attentiVely, and
when he had concluded, looked down upon him
and asked, Does your mamma know you're
out" Ph.e.e e-w! Spy arose and silently
withdrew, and since that time has hated the
small bonnets anA hoops in particular. His an
tipathy is unbounded, and amounts t., a perfect
mania; and ne tells the truth when he says he
is mad and getting madder. He has an aver
sion to all hoops: he has applied TO the Town
Commissioners to pass an ordinance prohibiting
boys from trundling hoops in the streets, under
the pretence that it would frighten horses -
sold his farm because hoop-poles grew on the
outskirts of ii, and hates barrels, hogsheads
buckets. and every other mechanical invention
that is held together with hoops. On other
subjects he is sane. is good-nat tured, well.
disposed man, and means UeH. Justice to our
ser induces me to communicate this informa
ton, that the ladies' may weigh his writings
as the rawlings of mad cap, and not the SEN
timents OF our sex generally, as we think prett.
considerable of them. have no doubt, Spy il
one of the fraternity who, sometime ago, made
such noise about " Bustles " and " "Bloomers.
1t is time that he had learned to hold his peae,
aRd let the ladies' choose their own costume
without being annoyed by the newspaper squib
of " crusty old bachelors" and thereby avoiC
difficulty. Yours, truly,
| THEOPHILUs.
Cool Spring, Feb. 5, 1857. =, ......'.... '5..