Columbia Democrat and Bloomsburg general advertiser. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1850-1866, 1857-07-18
OLIVE LEAVES.

WeTier had n love for Char otte,
Such as words could never utter;
Would you know how first he met her
she was cutting bread aud butter.
Charlotte was married lady,
And moral man was Werter,
And for all the wealth OF Indies
Would do nothing that might hurt her.
So he sighed and pined aud oglsd,
And hi passion boil ed and bubbled,
Till he blew his silly brains out,
And no more by.thcm was troubled.
Charlotte, having seen his body
Borne before her shutter,
Like ellconducted person,
Went on cutting bread and butter
I4- A French writer is represented as
calling dyspepsia "thc rcmorSo of a guilty
stomach,
pG- We hear of hcn-pecked husbands,
but nothing about rooster 'pecked wives"
sa~ The ancieot Greeks buried their
dead in jars. Hence the origin of the
expression -"He's gone t. the pot"
RW- Dobbs says that people who endorse
notes, are called "sureties," for this reason,
thatin nine cases out Of ten they are "slre," ="
to be called upon for the money.
A1-"You've destroyed my piece ofmind
said desponding lover to truant lass
at can't do you much harm, j ohm, for twas
an amazing small piece you had anyway !"
was the quick reply.
RAJ A sailor, looking serious in chapel,
was asked by the clergyman if he felt any
change whereupon the tar put his hand in
his pocket and replied, that she hadn't got
cent
S4- DR.. Ray, Superintendent of the
Butler Hospital for the Insane, in his re-
port says ga hearty laughs more desirable
for mental health than any exercise of the
reasoning faculties"
p@ Excuse me, madam, but ! would
like to ask why you look at me so very
savagely! 80 beg pardon, sir ! 1 took
you for my husband W
rsy- A woman has suggested that when
men break their hears, it is all the same
as when lobster breaks one Of his claws
another sprouting Immediately, and grow
ing in its place.
sa "'Tis strange" muttered young
man as he staggered home from supper
party, how evil communications corrupt
good manners. I've been surrounded b,
tumblers all the evening, and now I'm
tumbler myself"
HW- "Pat," said Yankee to an Irish
man, as they passed tree near Harlaem
with rope hanging from one of it
branches, 'where do you suppose 20
would be ifthat rope had its deserts ~
f "Faith, I'd be walAing here all alone t
a New York !"
sB- A young and beautiful, but poo
S widow, was about to marry rich ol
0 widower. Her friends wished to kno
r what she wanted to marry him for I Sh
, replied "For pure love; love the groun
: (meaning firm, probably on which |
walks, and the very house in which Il
b lives" There is platonic love for you :
$ There's mono Of your school girl romance
: that
= Bs~ A western editor, whose subscriber
> complained very loudly that he did n
c give them news enough for their none
) told them that if they did not find enous
y in the paper, they had better read the Bib
G which, he had TO doubt, would be news
IL them.
" Bar "Col. w. is a fine looking ma
isn't he :" said friend of ours the 9th
y day. "Yes," replied another, 81 "
" taken for him one time" "You why y
are as ugly as SIM" II don't care
= that, 1 endorsed his note, and was tax
for him by the sheriff. !"