Arkansas true Democrat., 1857-12-01
From Porter, Spirit Of u Bob Grants Courtship.
BY HAZEL GREEN. ESQ

READER, have you ever travelled by steam boat on any of our western rivers? If so. YOU nave had the greatest opportunity to "pick up ,'eIhSi or, m other words to hear stories, or to pc present at the "spinning of hard yarns.' if u Sult you better, in the known world Every body must tell story, and then everybody else must tell one to match; and so it eops from morning till night, and from night till morning. unless the boat should happen to sink. or the boiler burst. No accident that Is not great enough to stop the machienrv, can stop the "splnnlng" machines
 ' Not long since, was taking trip on one of i our rivers, when, as might well be expected. 1 was treated to large number of "racv'' anec- doteS n most of which the narrators themselves heiu the most conspicuous position. In the number was one about Bob Grant and his court- shlp, which afforded no little merriment. Be- neNlh9 It would ainuse some of you who read foRrERS $ SPIRIT OF THE TIMES, 1 have resolved to give It Just as l received it as near as possi- b.c: | our story reminds me of one Bob Grant. whom once knew, and may say with whom was very intimate" said the old gentleman to whom am indebted for the "varn." " Bob was queer fellow, and rather green withal, and what was stli worse, very bashiul when among the ladies' One day, 1 gave him lecturing about hls stuPdlty-told him it would never dO-that ne was rapid approaching that period when ne would be looked upon ., oll bachelor. ana be deSPlsed bv ail the genler Sex. 1 saw i II made deep impression on him, so went oh
 Y You had better drop those old bachelor notlons, Bob, and get you wife, before it is 'eternaIly and everastingly too late.'' \ Bob bushed dceply-Iooked in all direc tonS, to see that no third person was in hearing, and then sald
 To tell you the truth, Arch, have been thinking something about that matter; but who Is there that could get to have mel? ! Fshaw you are talking nonsense now | sald !. There ellonly oft them, if yop would only scrape up courage enough to ask them For instance, thcre's Nell Ssuson-how would she sut?
 ~ She'd suit to a T, Arch. But you don't pretend to say could get Nell; do you? i- Get Nell. Why, yes; certainly do and l would not be afraid to bet hundred dollars on H. if you'd only try said F \ This Was new idea to Bob and he was tckled almost to death with it. After thinking a moment, during which time his face was il- Inmlnated with one of his broadest grins, he ventured to ask me how 1 would proceed. if I were in his place, and wanted to get Nell | gave hlm full directions, after which he started home as happy as a jay bird, promising to go and see Nell the very next Saturday night Dob was as good as his word Saturday night came, and he went over to old man Stin sohs Nell was at home, and guessing his bu- slness, made herself very agreeable. Bob's courage raised hlty per cent. and so, as soon as the folks had retired, he commenced his first courtshlp. To begin, he found dsagreeable task; but when once the ice was broken, he felt ! llkea new creature. Nell smiled so bewitch- ingly upon him, and said many charming things. Never before had he known hours to ny so rapidly, or moments to be spent so plea sanity. Who could wonder at it? for Nell would lean her pretty head down on his shoul- der when he joked her about her beaux or about getting married Oh, what dear crae ture he soon began to think she was. How he almost cursed himself for having passed so much of his life in ignorance of such bliss.
 Before Bob had scarcel ly time to think, and long before he had come to the point, the old clock struck twelve, and Nell reminded him that It was time to retire.
 1 "' But l have not told you all wish,' said be-
 1 ou can come again next Saturday night she replied, with most fascinating smile.
 "This was capital Permission to come agaln! He agreed to retire. Nell told him where he could sleep; and then, as is the custom m some ot the western States, brought pot of warm water that he might wash his feet The pot was an old-fashioned one-big at the bottom and little at the top--so very little at the top that Bob viewed 1t with some misgivngs. lest it should refuse to admit his feet, Not feeling willing to call MelI's attention to the enormous size of these latter named articles, he hauled off his shoes, and with one desperate thrust lodged both feet on the bottom of the vessel. CaDital luck, thought he, as he sat bathing them Nell set near by, waiting for him to get through, that she might remove the pot. At length, the clock struck one. Bob did not seem to notice it. but sat with both feet m the pot, apparently in a brown study.
 1t is one o'clock, said Nell, by way of a hint
 '" Yes, man. said Bob, but still kept on with his bathing.
 1.-Two. and then three, were sounded from the old bell still MT. Grant paidno attention to 1t, but maintained his position in silence, appa- rently resolved to bathe his feet all night Mell's patience finally wore out, and she said, arising from her chair:
 "' Mr. Grant you can retire when you choose am going to bed'
 "' Hold on! said Bob, hold on minute.- Whats the price of this here pot?' l :" What do you mean?' she asked vastly astonished
 "'l mean, by thunder I'm gon' to break this this pot; and I'd like to know the price of il'
 Father! father! screamed Nell, come here, quick! Mir. Grants gone mad! Quick quickt
 h an instant, the old man was with them nerved and prepared for desperate struggle How sadly disappointed! Instead of finding Mr. Grant raving maniac, as he had expected,