The Wyandot pioneer. (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1853-1868, 1857-04-23
Mit NM Numor.

ibty uiS ueSPis iSHSiouS people III
Rhode Island, il the following be. true
A Connecticut schoolmaster asked lad
from Newport "how many Gods there
are?'' The boy, after scratching his head
some time, replied--.'I don't know how
many you've got in Connecticut, but we
have none in Rhode Island
The young lady who swooned on hear
ing il announced that naked fact would
be disclosed, came to on receiving posi-
tive assurance that it would be clothed in
becoming language.
The question has been asked why
it is considered impolite for gentle
men to go into the presence of ladies in
their shirt sleeves, whilst it is considered
in every way correct for the ladies Them
selves to tppear before gentlemen without
any sleeves at all.
"Doyou 20 to school now, Charlic?"
Yes. sir, had fight to-day, too, .
he replied.
"You had! Which wbipped?"
"oh, got whipped" he replied. with
great frankness.
- "Was the other boy bigger than you?'
mo, he was litter"
"Well, how came you to let hitler boy
whip your
80 you see he was madder nor Iacds. "
Somebody says there is decided diff
ference between perseverance AMI obsti-
macy. One strong will and the otLer is
strong won't. ~
The Elmira Advertiser in speaking OF
fashions says:
.'Strip all the men and woman of our
village Of their fine clothes. and what a
change would be apparent"
OF course there would!
"Mr. Speaker" said distinguished
orator in western legislature, Il have
been accused of vascilation in my polit-
ical principles! Me vascillatel--me, who
first drew the breath of life beneath
the gigantic foliage Of the forest oak!-
who was cradled in an earthquake and
sucked by the Mississippil-me, whose
playthings in childhood were the bear and
the alligator, and who in maturer years de-
lighted 10 grapple with the furious torrent
as it rushed wild and headlong from its
mountain home. and to sport with the tor
nado, and double engine steamboats,! Me
yasciliate, Mr.. President! the idea is pre-
posterousW
Did you ever hear OF mans getting
the better Of woman in "free Speech
Here is an attempt and failure, which
should warn all men hereafter:
''Madame." said cross-tempered ply
sician to patient. elf women were admit
ted TO paradise their tongues would make
it purgatory.''
"And some physicians, if allowed to
practice replied the lady, "would make
it desert"
.Agentleman who has very strong de-
sire to be funny man, sat down upon a
hooped skirt the other day. With des-
peration equal to any emergency, he
whistled, "I'm sitting on the style, Ma
ry."
An Irish jockey. who was "fetlock deep
in the turf" being elated with his success
at winning race, observed; "Be me soul,
T'mfrst at tlast-Pve always been behind
before"
PRENTICE LAsT.-The Southern Stand
ard says that ''South Carolina is the very
seat of moral and political chivalry." We
can well imagine, that if moral and polit-
ical chivalry were personstfed, South Car.
olina would be its seat.-ZouiSviAe Jour
nal.
BOARDING HOUSE DIALOGUE Landla.
dy--"Mr. Jones you don't seem to like
those sausages. Pray what is the mat
ter?''
Mr. Jones very reluctantly. II hadn't
said nothing against these sausages, but
since you have called my attention te
these sausages, / wiH sag that where you
do find these sausages you don't find ang
dcgs!" Subject dropped.