The Tiffin tribune. [volume] (Tiffin, Ohio) 1848-1859, 1857-08-07
The Bachelor and baby.

"wha. shall / do9" and the old baoh-
elor stamped about the sitting room in a
perfect rage Of doubt. looking FIRST at the
mapping babe in ,he little willow cradle.
and theu st the busy French clock on She
mantle shelf.
CAS- sure as my name is Joseph Phelps,
that little two fssed nephew OF mino is
waking. and il wants one whole hour OF
tho time which his mother appointed for
her return. Whewl l actually swear
thinking about il. What can l do with
it-how can treat il to sugar what dye
call ems, or hold Il, or tro, Il, or do any
thing with itg"
AZ this iuncture faint wall from the
baby receptacle brought bachelor Jose ph
10 his tabs. With an energy and alaority
that would i'll become a husband and a ba.
by-lender, he commenced rocking the
cradle. sending the indignant baby in .
perfect tremor Of kicks aud squalls
Backwards aud forwards, from one side
of the cradle to the other the round, rod
face rolled; the infant fsts were clenched
with force that purpled thom; while
from tho white plump throat came a cry
that set the bachelor wild with fear.
Again Joe looked at the clock.
"What in the deuce can do?" he ex.
claimed, viewing wofully the little in.
famed face before him.
He sa. in big chair before the babe
spread a double tsblo-quilt over his knees,
and with look Of terror upon his face,
proceeded to take baby from It's resting
place He drew the young hopeful into
his lap just as very neat old lady would
pick up a pocket-handkerchief, with his
thumbs aud fingers. A fresh yell from
the rosy mouth Of the baby was the only
expression Of thanks as no commenced the
never-out.of.fashion baby-trot.
1T must be that something is prioking
him. Shool shool" said Joe, commen-
cling a search for the aggravating pin that
was driving the child into such n rage.
But no pin was to be found, and he made
an attempt to turn baby over, but OIL
the little eal.like form fol- out Of his lap
10 the Aoor, sending forth CRY that was
"louder, clearer, deadler than before.
"Bord save mel have broken its
neck was the exclamation as he picked
baby up, and in tho agony Of despair
tried TO quiet him. A thought struck
Joe. He saw basque hanging up
against the wall Of an adjoining bedroom,
and with a smile OF delight upon his couu-
fananaa NJ s.e-.i g. "a c.--- ---..eyL. .
there it was stuffing, boddioe &c: real
monument Of feminine ingenuity He
was wild with Joy. He pinned IL over
his coat, and fastened the sleeves behind
him. Ho took baby and laid its head
against this false breast work.
"Shades Of Southern plantations and
cotton faoloriesp exclaimed Joe, as baby
rooted his nose in about mile, then cud.
died for a snooze. Then tho bachelor com
menced singing.
"Woman arc all q aocIing show,
For manJ doluslon given,
When hllsd with cottoa. stuffed with tow,
She loyks quite we'll"
A rap upon the door stopped Joe in the
midst OF his suggestive song, and before
he had timo to disarray himself, tho door
was opened, and rogueish. laughing
pair Of eyes 2eered in upon him.
"Your sister is not at home, is she?"
cherrupped the visitor.
mo ma'am" sammered Joe, growing
very red in the face, "and have turned
nurse"
"Miss Hayes laughed; offered to re-
lieve him Of his ohargs, which he willing
ly consented to, sitting near by the while,
intently watching her, She managed ba-
by to charm, without the basque, and
Joe was captivated.
Joseph Phelps married Fanny Hayes,
upon my word he did.