Smyrna times., 1857-07-15

WESTERN ANNoYANCEs.-JudgeJ j., who ha
recently returned from a tour in the West, re
lates an anecdote illustrating the horrors Il
which travellers in that region are exposed
In his passage to one of the rivers, he fell il
company with talkative lady and gentleman
to whom he was relating some of his suffering
from mosquitoes.
Husband" !" said the lady TO the gentleman
owning to that title, "you had better tell the
gentleman about the man we met, in Iowa."
The hint was sufficient and the husband
proceeded to say that, in their travels farther
West, they made the acquaintance of stall
wart rollicking, Western Hoosier, one of the
genius who could "whip his weight in wilC
CATS" but who possessed fund of quiet gooC
humor. On one occasion, they had stopped al
hotel in the interior, no: of the most inviting
appearance. They were shown to their rooms
the hoosier at one end, and the lady aud gen.
tleman at the other end of long hall. About
midnight the drowsy couple were startled by a
report of fire arms, proceeding from the end ot
the hall occupied by their travelling companion.
Both started up in the bed and began to specu-
late upon the probable cause of the untimely
alarm, when they heard rushing of feet and a
confusion of voices in the hall. On going to
the door, the gentleman found the whole house
hold, headed by the landlord, rushing in the
direction of the report. His curiosity led him
to follow this midnight procession, and he ar
rived with the rest at the hoosier's door. The
landlord tried the LATCH but found the door fast,
whereupon in loud voice, he demanded admis-
sion. 80
"What do you want I" roared voice with
in.
Want to come in :" replied the landlord.
Cant do it," was the response from within,
It's my room, and I'm in bed-can'tcome in"
8 Let me in I" shouted the landlord, in a
louder tone, at the same time shaking the door
violently, "or I'll break the door down."
"Hold on!'' rejoined the voice within; I'll
open the door,"
The door was soon open, when in rushed the
whole party, expecting to see the whole floor
covered with blood. What was their surprise
to see everything in its proper place, and the
hoosier calm and unconcerned. A revolver was
careleasly lying upon the bed.
Who fired that pistol 7" demanded the land
lord
81 did" was the reply.
"Why?" asked the landlord.
The hooser stepped to the bed, and throwing
open the covering, said, Look here. Do you
see that o.
The attention of the party was at once direc-
ted to the point indicated, aud there over the
whole surface of the sheet, bed bugs were scam
pering in every direction, like flock of sheep
frightened by dog. The landlord was chag-
rined and puzzled and looked to his lodger for
an explanation.
"These," began the hooser, Strengthening
himself up to his full height and gesticulating
with his right hand in grandiloquent style
I" these are my friends have settled an ar.
mistice with them, and we are On friendly terms,
but on the sill there, just outside, you will find
two Internal big fellows that couldn't do any
thing with, and so just put bullet through
'em. But it's all right now, it, all understood
between me and my friends here, and we shall
get along we'll enough now."
II is needless to add, that the landlord retired
to his own bed visibly crest-fallen, while the
spectators enjoyed hearty laugh.-SPiritual
Telegraph.