Weekly Trinity journal., 1857-08-01
Morals on the AIisouri River.

beautiful ones. gave q pleasant and agreeable
tone to the trip, and everything promised plea
sure on the way But unfortunately for human
nature, it is subject to its fralties in any and
every cline, and under any and all circumstan-
ces. And so away Off up the Missouri river,
even at the sanity city of the Mormons Council
Bluffs men have their weaknesses and women
their foibles And that this is most lamentably
true, was illustrated by the fact that among our
respectable passengers. was found verdant
looking youth running away with another man S
wife.
The melancholy fact having leaked out it was
forthwith resolved that Judge Lynch should call
special session Of his august and summary
court.
Arrangements were soon made, Sberffs and
Judges hastily put on authority and dignity, and
the following writ was Immediately issued
In the name of the People Special, ss.--Court
of Judge Lynch.
Steamer Minnehaha-To any Sheriff or officer
Of the steamer Minnehaha, greeting:
We command you, in the name of our Superior
Court, now holding special session on board the
steamer aforesaid, that you arrest and bring
forthwith into our august presence, Don Juan
c., if found in your bailliwick. charged with
grand larceny and the further crime of adultery
upon the high seas, against the peace and dignity
of the giant republic, and within the immediate
cognizance of this high Court.
And in this you fail not upon your peril.
Given under our hand and the seal Of the
Court, this 29th day of Flora, and in the year Of
our Court the fifty seventh.
JUDGE LYNCH, Chief Justice
Judge Chastity Associates
Judge Purity, A''o''""'
As usual, the Sheriff of Judge Lynch's Court
acted with astonishing promptitude and vigor,
and in twenty minutes from the issuing Of the
warrant, the guilty Mr.. C-l stood in the au-
gust presence Of the supreme terrestrial justice.
Having been regularly indicted, petty jury
was empanneled and the public prosecutor APP
pearng against him, the chief justice appointed
counsel for the defense, and the trial at once
began.
The Court Room-gents' eabin--was crowded,
and all eyes were fixed upon the physiognomy OF
the accused, while the aforesaid countenance
grew white and red by turns, as either fear or
shame took possession of its possessor.
Witnesses for the prosecution were examined
one after another and all testimony went straight
to show that the lady was put on board the MINI
nebaha, at Council Bluffs, by her own liege lord,
and that the prisoner came on board at the next
landing and took possession of her as his own
welded wife, and that as such they had roomed
together since. Parties from the Bluffs, who
knew the injured husband testified to the mar
riage with the frail lady passenger, which trans
pired only same two months since.
The case looked dark. There was no testmo-
nv in contradiction to the above The prose
cutting attorney looked triumphant. The jury
grew solemnly dignifed The Chief Justice and
his associates waxcd still sterner and looked still
more morosely grave. The counsel for the de-
tense took the prisoner to one side-a few mo-
mcnts conversation ensued and again they APP
peared in Court. The counsel and his unfortu
nate client seemed like men in desperate circum
stances. Hope and fear alternated on their eX-
pressive but diabolcally sedate countenances
AT length, however, the counsel rose and put in
the following document conclusive and sufi
cient evidence of the innocence and purity of
bis client. Amidst mingled Kisses and murmur
ings Of wrath, it was admitted evidence in
Court
SUPREME BENCH-SHOEMAKER'S COURT
CouNcIL BLUFFS CITY, Iowa, May I'd, 1857.
TO all to whom these presents may come
greeting:
Be it known that !, Simeon Shoemaker, JUS
tice of the Peace Of said city and State reposing
special confidence in the statement that an un-
pleasant row has existed for some time between
Job @ and his wife Betsy, do hereby dissolve
the bonds of matrimony heretofore existing be-
tween them very much to their mutual disgust.
And furthermore be it known that having been
duly elected to this position by the Mormon vote,
do, in harmony with the sublime polygamic doc
trines Of Saint Brigham Young, hereby seal and
deliver over the said Betsey to C, Esq, to
have, to use and to hold in any manner that to
him may seem good. Witness my hand and the
great seal of the Court hereuntO appended, on
this, the 2Gth day Of May, A. d. 1857.
SIMEON SHOEMAKER, j. F.,
exonicio marriage breaker and maker.
This record, from the authenticated docket of
ESQUIRE Shoemaker was introduced with appa-
rent confidence on the part of the defense ; and
the prisoner being put on the stand, testified in
substance the same thing, assuring the jury that
he was the lawful husband Of Mrs. Q-ley.
The Court however, ruled that Shoemaker had
no authority in law, and did not amount to much
as a man, and thai the prisoner an unmtiga-
ted liar. The Chief Justice then launched out
into q moral dissertation. distinguished alike for
its parity and beauty of thought, and its elegance
and chastity of expression.
The jury retired, and in just one hour and
twenty five minutes, returned with the following
VERDICT.
We the Jurors of this august Court, after
solemn and deliberate delberalion, and reflective
consideration in the momentous case submitted
to us do find
|. That Esquire Shocmaker's commission ex'
pirod on the lst April 1867.
q That Esquire Shoemaker had no authority
to grant divorce in the case of Q. vs. Q.
5. That the defendant c. is guilty in man
ucr and form, as he stands charged in the indict-
ment
We recommend that C. be put upon log and
sent down the river rolling, That Mrs. Q. be
locked up in her state room, and kept securely
until she arrives at the place of her destination,
when she shall he delivered over to her friends
and that sentence be executed forthwith
PETER JONES, Foreman.
While the Judge was preparing to pass sen.
tence upon the convicted and truly wretched
man, the steamer stopped at a woodyard-pris-
oner's counsel obtained private interview, and
advised culprit to agitate his pedal extremities
and disappear in the thick hazel brush and un-
derwood that skirted the shore. Prisoner sweat
ed in his great agony, and trembled with much
fear, was secretly assisted up the gangway plank
by his counsel--fourteen deck hands firing pis
tolls and yelling like devils incarnate, were soon
bowling on his track. Bnt darkness covered his
person and his shame with a robe of common
charity, and he escaped, never to return. Next
morning the sentence was completed, and the
disgraced female was delivered over to her
friends, who awaited her arrival at R.