Delaware weekly Republican. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1841-188?, 1857-11-05

irogge is one anphbyous animal with foure
teete, anayked bOddle, and WITHOUT ever a
taile. He hath u horse voice, and loyeytl
much TO use it ON ye summer nights. He is
remarkable for graceful SPINNING with rapid
uesSe and for taking verrie large leaps on ye
lands.
Here is pretty good parody on the we'll
! known song oftbe Troubadour:-
Gaiy the editor
Smoked his cigar,
While he was scissorlng
News near and far
Looking for murders dire,
Item or puff
Devil say-devil say
Amt this enough
CooL.-A cnmpositor running out of copy
sent the following note to the Editors
MIR. EDITOR.
This typos out of copy,
Out of money too,
Thinks he'd like to have some @
Either one will do.
IL you've got no copy,
Send along the 'edust,'
I'll put on my coat,
And go upon tbust." a
EDITORS REPLY.
Thank you MIR. johnson,
(Hope l don't oiiend)
Times 'are very hard,'
Guess l will suspend
So put on your coat
Go upon your Fsbust,"
Tell the ''trade" in general
They will have to tstrust."
Fast equine stock is in great demand just at
present, and speedy nags are as numerous as
mosquitoes in Mississippi, especially the kind
similar to the following.
''TaREE MINUTE" HORSE, "A horrible old
rip of horse belonging to doctor was to be
sold at auction. He was adv ertised as ca cele-
brated hoise-kind in harness-had made his
mile inside ofthree minutes-was handy at tho
plough--and sold only because the owner had
no further use for him." On the day of sale
crowd gathered amongwhom was the doctor,
whom the horse no sooner saw than he began
| to manifest signs Of uneasiness, which the aue-
| tioneer called life and spirit The first bid
was seventy five dollars, and soon run up to
one hundred -one hundred and twenty-five
one hundred and iifty-at which the nag was
pronounced sold. The buyer "a down easterl
paid the money, and harnessed him to his wa
fad ROT 5tSff stsis4i
he was seen vending his way back, not having
got quite as far as Cape Cod He told the
auctioneer he had returned to make some in-
quiries, which perhaps it would have been as
we'll to have made before he bought the horse.
ssYou say this animal has made his mile under
three minutes ~ stfes" ''May be allowed
to inquire holr long since ?" ssUertainly. With
in three weeks" '.One question more. IPhere
did he do it2'' con the Railroad cGrs-aoteR
grade ~
A Slow NoTE.-A man in Boston (ofcourse)
was sorely prosecuted by an avaricious bust
ness acquaintance, TO paciiy whom he was OBJ
| liged to settler and not wishing to pay over a
| few hundred dollars in cash, he drew up note
| Obligating himself to discharge the account af-
| ter pecitled date of time. The creditor, who
was noted for this sssticking principles" was
not, in Justice, really entitled to the money,
hut when 'thirty days erdate' were expired,
he anxiously presented the note for payment.
The debtor, instead OF meeting it, replied
stThe note is not yet due, sirl"
"But it is, though;'' it reads, thirty days af-
| ter date, promise to pay so and so and thir-
| ty-one days have elapsed sluce the date there
| of, and So
eI don't careif thirty-one years have elapsed
since the date Of the note, shall still contend
| for its immaturity,' answered the debtor, inter
ruptng the not very good humored note hold
| er, who soon made his exit, slamming the
street door after him, muttering incoherently
about law. judgement, executions, &c.
In few days both parties were before a
magistrate, who upon concluding the inyesti-
CATION, proclaimed that he must certainly
award Judgment against the debtor, for the
note, and the cost Of prosecution besides.
tAnd what then2' inquired the defendant Of
the Judge.
81 shall issue al execution ifthe plaintiff de.
sires it, returned his honor.
, s1o be sure-I want one Immediately, bawl-
ed the plaintiff, whose countenance revealed
his determination to allow no mercy, as he
edged his way as near the judge as possible.
, sYou are resolved upon Judgment and exc
, cution = demanded the defendant.
. Il am,' replied the Judge, taking up his pen
7 to record tln same.
80 be sure we are 2 coincided the plaintiff
{ | with a chuckle.
81 presume your honor can spell correctly 2
g said the defendant, as he picked up his ha
! and set il further upon the table before him.
L nlof, fI,a ind oh IN.
with rage.
sWill you obige me by carefully spelling an
reading the first line in that valuable docr
y ment,' urged the defendant, disregarding th
y anger the magistrate, and directing his a
q tentlon to the note and then al the defendan
. but probably thinking 1t was best to take
y cooly, proceeded to do as requested, and res
y aloud in very lucid style:
le sTbirty days after date prom
y sStopp shouted the defendant, don't yor
~ n read it right %
~ d dol was the Judges response.
IT, sYou don't!' returned the defendant
g. thought you couldn't SPELL" I
er The Judge was now boiling over with rag
lm and smote the desk before him so violent
81, with his clenchcd hands as to cause those WI
en- stood about him, including the expecta
W, plaintiff, to retreat few PAGES III aouo
io- quick time ..,i !
Keep your temper, indge or we shall
Obliged to have the case transferred TO a1o'n 1o =,
nge court, where the magistrate understands ,i ~
mol art and mystery Of spelling words OF ohe e ~,
= ble. and don't make fool of himself py N.Y.
iry Ing up row and smashing office intnlle mi tbos
T6ere You may keep your seat 6at aa pote tS say say
hes, nresent what the first line OF ina. hV ~. s
5old said the defendant, with coolness ~, ;nJes
car Sas ised the audience AMI puzzled the ga%ge an
Having again glanced at the doeued ny uni a
appearing escaped bis perception the uds
hur- nroceeded to read ,,.on,iva IN nav
Iis.) sThirty days atter asa" % taeindanf. svon ga
was Snell Ses note is not dine gentlemen, until thir
with 'IhlS ~ no's t.jl proclaimed the magistrate
aays gay ease case Is accordingly dismissed and u
,ave onmrt .n, adjourned until tomorrow morning
the -------
A WIFE MASuFAoroY.-From the wesvil
syI- roo,p Of the Ward Mills, at Indian orchsr
Mass, in which an average OF eO person.,
Chi employed, lS7 girls have been naRaed VILE
/. two years.