True American. [volume] (Steubenville [Ohio]) 1855-1861, 1857-03-18
StIss0rtsms.

St1sSOrtsms.
No weary hours were spent
These scraps to find,
But " SCISSORS" kindly took
The place of mind.
"Oh in the Silly night,
When slnmber's chain has bound me
Sad memory throws the light,
0fother days around me;
The signs. the tears of Childhood's years,
The words oflove then spoken,
The eyes that shone now dimmed and gone,
The cheerful hearts now broken"
In Siberiu, the greatest luxures are raw
cats served up in bears oil; while in ia
pan stewed crocodile fanked with mon
KEYS feet is the height of epcurianism.
A GOOD JEST in time of misfortune is
food and drink. 1t is strength to the arm,
digestion to the stomach, and courage to
the heart.
Tmr Atlantic Ocean is estimated at 8
miles, and the Pacific at miles deep.
RIDDLE.
Between thick set hedge of bones
A small red dog now barks, now moans.
.,'euSuol uumnq eqLn
--5unI aaMsNy ALL
Why is hungry boy looking at the
pudding in cookshop window, like wild
horse! Because he would be all the bet
ter ifhe had,a bit in his mouth.
AN old definition of the word Watch
man" was ga man employed by the
corporation to sleep in the open air."
Fish are common in the seas ofSurinam
with four eyes two ofthem on horns which
grow on the top of their heads.
LIKE dogs in wheel, birds in a cage,
or squirrels in chain, ambitious men still
climb and climb, with great labor and in
cessant anxiety, but never reach the top.
The MOST DIFFICULT PRoBLEM.-To
square the circle of lady's dress.
N. B.-A poor husband says he has been
trying the experiment on his wife's milli-
liners bills, and for the life of him he cam
not make them square at all.
RAILROAD EPITAPH.
"Sister, mother, aunt and me ..
Were run over, Here we be.
We should have had time to mizzle,
If they'd blown the engine whistle"
The wasp's nest usually contains $4,000
or 10000 cells.
A WORD of kindness is seldom spoken in
vain. 1t is seed which, even when drop
ped by chance, springs up flower.
Why are sheep the most dissipated and
unfortunate of animals! Because they
gambol in their youth, are generally black
legs, and are universally heeced.
He that.a vice from year to year inherits,
Wieldeth an axe against his tree of merits.
THERE are three sorts Of nobility-di-
vine, worldly and moral the divine de-
pends upon the power of God, the worldly
upon the greatness of our birth, the moral
upon the liberty of our mind.
THE most potent lebor-saving machine
is large fortune left by your aunt.
THERE are nearly six millions acres of
unsold lands in Michigan.
My life has been like summer skies,
When they are fair to view
But there never yet were hearts or skies,
Clouds might not wander through.
We spend much of our life making blum
ders and great deal more of it in correct
ing them.
A SHOWER of puppies is reported to have
taken place out West, which is supposed
to have been caused by their being kicked
y out Of the dog star.
AT North Simcoe, Canada, fifteen cop
per kettles have been dug up, containing
Indian remains, one kettle containing
twelve sculls, human hair and wampum.
IT more concerns thee to mend one fault
in thyself, than to find thousand in 9TH
ers.
Two thousand nine hundred silk worms
produce one pound Of silk; but it would
require twenty-seven thousand spiders, all
females to produce one pound of web.
Why is the tolling of bell like the
prayer Of q hypocrte4 Bekase it is SOL
emn sound by thoughtless tongue.
GEN.
{" 1t is stern and startling thing to think
How often mortality stands on the brink
OF its grave without any misgving
And yet in this slipping world of strife,
In the stir of human bustleso rife,
There are daily sounds to tell us that Life
d Is dying, and Death is living" [HooD.]
ALEXANDRA DUMAS at one time was very
poor, and rarely had any money. One OF
his friends was telling him ofa duel he had
recently fought, in which the ball of his
adversary had been turned aside by five
frank piece he had in his wastcoat pocket.
All, you are lucky fellow" said the
great Alexandra; :" if | had been in your
place, should have. been killed."
LAwYER-An individual who lives pnon