The Kanzas news., 1857-10-24

4
to hev your own way, and you've got to hev
mine so it's pooty clear that shall fog
you TO rope-yarns, or else you'll have to
make b'lieve my ways yourn, which'T suit
all round So you see, Parson Pitcher, /
quarrel with the Lords viii agin, and don't
expect you to hev no such trouble with me
twice, as you've had since Miss Eunice up
and died. swan IN give up reasonable
next time, SEEM it's SAL
Hardly could Parson Pitcher stand this
singular creed of doctrine, and the shrewd
and self-satisfed, yet honest expression of
face with which Josh clenched his argu
ment. Protesting himself in great haste to
study, he promised to publish as well as to
marry Josh, and when his old parishioner
was out of hearing, he indulged himself
with long fit of laughter, almost inextin-
guishable. over Josh's patent Christianizer.
Great was the astonishment of the whole
congregation on Sunday, when Josh's in
tentions were given out from the pulpit; and
strangely mixed and hesitating the congrats
ulations he received after his marriage, which
took place the following week. Parson
Pitcher took curious interest in the success
of Josh's project and he had to acknow-
ledge its beneficial effects, rather against his
will
Sal Ran was the best of house-keepers, as
scolds are apt to be or is it in reverse that
the rule began? She kept the farm house
Quakerly clean, and every garment of her
husbands scrupulously mended and re-
freshed; but if the smallest profanity es-
capped Uncle Josh's lips, he did indeed
''hear thunder and, with the asceted de-
votion of Guyonist, he endured every OBJ
jugatory torrent to the end, though his soft
and kindly heart would now and then cringe
and quiyer IN the process.
1t was all for his good, he often said, and
by the time Sal Ran had been In Miss Eu4
nice's place an equal term of years, Uncle
Josh had become so mild spoken, so kind,
so meek, that his dead wife must have re-
joieed over it in heaven, even as his brethren
did on earth.
And now comes the crowring honor of
his life. Uncle Josh was made deacon.
Sal celebrated the event with new black
silk frock, and asked Parson Pitcher home
to tea after the church meeting, and to such.
tea as is the great glory of New Eng
land house-keeper. Pies, preserves, cake,
biscuit, bread, short-cake, cheese, honey,
the unlucky parson, till he was quite in the
condition of Charles Lamb and the omnibus,
and gladly saw the signal OF retreat from the
table-he Withdrawing himself to the bench
on the stoop, to breathe the odorous June
air, and talk over matters and things with
Deacon Josh, while Miss Crane cleared off. ;
Long and piously the two worthless talked,
and at length came brief pause, broken by
Josh.
Well, Parson Pitcher, that are calkerla-
ton of mine about Sal did come out nigh
onter right, didn't it %
Yes, indeed, my good friend,' returned
the parson 'the trial she has been to you
has been really blessed, and shows most
strikingly the use of discipline in this life.'
Yes said Josh, 'if Miss Eunice had
lived, don't know but what l should "a
been swearin' man to this day; but Sal,
she's rated it out O. me, and I'm gettin' real
resigned, too
The meek complacency of the confession
still cleaned in Uncle Josh's eyes, as he
went in to prayers, but Sal Ran looked red
der than the crimson peonies on her posy-bed.
Parson Pitcher made an excellent prayer,
particularly descanting on the use Of trials:
and when he came to an end, and arose to
say good night, Mrs. Crane had vanished,
so he had to go home without taking leave
of her. Strange TO say, during the follow
ing year, rumor crept through the village
that Miss Deacon Crane had not been heard
to scold once for montbs-that she even held
her tongue under provocation this last fact
being Immediately put to the test BY few
evil minded and investigating boys, who
proceeded to pull her fennel bushes through
the pickets, and nipped the yellow heads,
receiving for their audacious thieving no
more than mild request not to do that
which actually shamed them into apologizing.
With this confirmation even Parson Pitch
er began to be credulous of report, and sent
directly for Deacon Crane to visit him.
'HoH's your wife, Deacon p said the
Parson, as soon as Josh was fairly seated In
the study.
We'll, Parson Pitcher, she's most onsar-
tainly changed. I don't believe she's got
riled more'n once, or gin it TO me for six
months
Very singular + said Parson Pitcher
4 am glad for both of you but what seems
to have wrought upon her %
WELL said Uncle Josh, with queer
glitter in his eye, Il expect she must a ben
In on the stoop about Fiction and her; for
next day stumbled and split lot o. new
milk onto the kitchen floor. That alters
riled her; SO begun TO say. % dear, I's
sorry, Sal = when she ups right away, and
says, says she-'You han't no need to be
skeered. Josh Crane, you've done with iic-
ton in this world; shan't never scold you
any more. I ant goin' 70 be made pack
horse to carry my husband to heaven 7 and
she never said no more to me, nor to her,
but she's ben nigh about as pretty behaved
as Miss Eunice ever since, and / hope /
shan't take to swearin', l guess shan't,
but do feel kinder Gravity about bein' re-
signed