The national era. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1847-1860, 1857-12-17


from yon pine-knot reddens your face. But We
will drink, aud in default of dragons blood
brother, shall have to offer thee plain brandy
but good, strong, palate-ticking."
So saying, he drew a demijohn and tir
cup from under his bed, and offered me to drink
When had declined, he poured out cup full
and drank it off, following it with another drink
of the same quantity.
"Do not be alarmed" said Franz, seeing thai
was watching him anxiously;" it will not
disturb my brain. l am like phosphoric acid
which gets stronger the more it is diluted-sc
my brain is restored to more equable, balance
the more have taken to upset it. Seriously,
wished to talk with you little tonight, and
being crazy when sober, am compelled to pur
chase my sanity by drunkenness. What is the
hour2"
about eight o'clock"
All, then, we have two or three hours yet
Draw your chair nearer, for | wish to talk to
you-feel in laxative humor. And do not be
afraid of me. for now am sane for the time.''
He heaped up moro fuel upon the glowing
torch, and then, adjusting himself in his rickety
chair, as if to make himself comfortable, pro.
ceeded.
He said truly, in indicating the effect of the
brandy upon him. 1t restored his balance OF
mind in measure, and took a way much of that
jarring, repulsive harshuess from his voice, 80
that could listen to him without being annoyed
so much by the suggestions that my mind took
from these marks of arrangement.
81 have always been a problem to your com.
mon sense, have not? Yes-well, l have been
always a problem to myself; and the grand
error of my life, take il, lies in the fact that
have tried to solve this problem, instead of act.
ing upon 1t as On automatic premiss, from which
to deduce comprehensive things. have lived
6ackacards, my friend, and you have the result
before you-a pitiable something, certainly. /
could not find final causes of things, and there.
fore disputed them, Himmel. Why should the
sap of the cabbage flow upward, rather than
downward? This / asked, and finding no ex.
PLANTATION offered, determined it should flow
downward; and see what a rotten, useless, i'm.
practicable esculent has resulted The ten.
deucy to contradiction has been my baue l
saw heaven above al d earth below. In Gods
name, thought /, why not earth above and
heaven below? The fitness of things, without
a reason for that fitness, never satisfied me and
that reason must be simply negative one
the q,tia impOSsibile-the reductio adj absurd.
um. must have positive, regulative whyfor.
You zee what | am; know what I might be.
But could never accept the principle of Can.
dide ~ faM que nos cultirons nos jardins. ,
l grasped at the universal, and only seized upon
the particular. l clutched at the stars and nv
fingers closed over a rotten turnip. Necessity,
necessity, necessity And now | do
penance, after this miserable fashion. Let me
see; tried astrology, thinking to wrest from
the stars the great world-secret Bah Then
L drank, you know, and rioted. Afterwards. |
sought the grand panacea with the mystics-
the Cabbalists, the Alchemists. Here had il. of
q surety. You know how used to study them.
Der Teufel. They were deep, and l thought.
that when | got to the bottom Of the well. /
should find the diamond there. Ach, mein bru.
der, did get to the bottom, and splashed about
in the mud there, but no diamond It was all
mud-as you call it here, humbug! AWAY with
these fellows They wrap you up something
in thonsand-fold napkins, hide it carefully away,
and Nv whisper to you. Dslye: deIye here is
four carat soldl' But, when you have dug out
the mummy, and painfully unwound it of its
coverings, you find, instead of Mem
mons high priest, with his papyrus chart to the
Universe folded to his bosom-what? hand.
Jul of bad smelling dust, that soils your fingers.
our buried talent turns out brassy counter.
Felt. Away with them l know the nakedness
Of all-of the genii of Solomon's ring; of the
demons Of Michael Scott; of the sights in old
Dee's crystal; of the Herr Urian of Doctor
Faust !; of the Salsmanders and Sylphs and
Undines and Gnomes of his Excellency M. LIE
Compte de Gabalis Image, Magnes, Magia
which means soap bubbles!
"What then? Finding this painfully out, why
did not, you ask, settle down into rational
man, and give up fantasy? More of that pres
emily. Enough that now know it was not my
fate. But did make the attempt / studied
you know, and after that worked, and after
that l married -ha, ha married 1t was
good oke, doubtless, to you, to see me married
II was a good joke to me, also, only at the time
l did not recognise the fact, Sapperment.
tell you took it in serious soberness. I said
to myself, everything is possible-I did, upon
my word. / said to myself, here is a good girl
loves me, and love her. Well, cannot make
her happy2 Is it not within the range of the
possible that she and can sail down life's
stream, without shipwreck, in company? And
| give you my word, looked at the matter 80
long, from that partial point of view, that finally
had really persuaded myself it pas possible.
began actually to people my fancy with pic
tures OF myself as domestic Tor at least domes.
ticatedl animal {; preferring my own Preside and
my own round of duties to punch and madness.
1t is 80. Is it not ridiculous Ha, ha how
time brings things out in their right coloring,
exceptold maids and dowagers, of course. Then,
besides, Lii loved me as angels love, and =
well-and, fratercule, you may not believe me
but, fratercule," he hid his face from me as he
murmured these words, and there was a strange
pathos In his voice, reminding me of some of
the softer cadeuces in "Teufelslied.") "frater.
cule, lOUed Liz"
Il
brandy, drank it off at a eulp, and then pro.
ceeded:
well, married her, and that's WHY am
damned before my time, you see. The tends
we're furious that an hours Joy should visit me.
Oh mein bruder, mein bruder, that hour! How
1t tew by, how it rushed away from US, and l
heard not the roar of its departure, felt not the
gloom OF the on coming darknessl Well, we
dwelt awhile IN Parsdis and all went well, for
Lii knew me not. But then, like Psyche, she
struck the light one night, to have glimpse of
the Cupid she had taken to her arms. and she
saw the devilstamp on my brow. Then she
died, and was glad of it, for l had lost nv
divinity. Yet, my brother, in my arms she
died, with her lips to my lips. Sappermentl
Twas scene for melodrama! You do not
understand me, then? Lowest not the epipram
as of old? Err ist rechti will tell YOU. Her
love was not enough for me. 1t did not fill
my soul-or, rather, it was too much for me-
beyond me-above me. For time, we had
shaken the bottle SO vehemently, that we fancied
the oil and the. water were blended; but as
soon as the bottle rested, 10 the oil on top, the
water beneath. Was it my fault, or my fate
| know not. l do penance for it, Well, our
spheres proved to be different. She might and
did bend down to me from hers might and
did reach up to her from mine and thus we
were able to touch fingers, but that was all
the position was painful; and, though she bent
ever down, finally reached not up. And. for
that, | do penance, my brother So then the
old longings, graspings, aims, came back with
double force, and the old i'll success followed