The Carolina Spartan. [volume] (Spartanburg, S.C.) 1852-1896, 1857-05-28
Is LAGER BEER INTOXICATING.

beer rs beverage. Our friends Of Porter's
Spirit OF the Times publish a song, music
and words, in its honor and that funny fell
low, "Doesiicks," has been publishing 10 the
world his own experiences Of its (the beer's)
practical use. We wonder whether this re-
markable fluid is or is not intoxicating,
Hear "Dcesticks" on that pint:
Scenc.-A Lager beer shop.
Present-Doesticks and his friend Dam
phool, and German maiden, awaiting or.
deis:
Damphool gave her a feeble wink, and
SAID, "zwel," whereupon she brought US.
with her own fair hands. two mugs Of the
beverage known as Lager and stood wait
ing with her own hands on her hips
thought she wanted 10 enter into converse
tion; so 10y way of making myself agreeable.
wnked, as Damphoo had, and also said
"zwel'-l thought "zwei" was a term of
endearment. She deserted us for an instant.
aud come back with two mugs Of Beer.
Imagined that of course "zwel" meant ".lar.
ling" aud that she had misunderstood me
attempted 10 explain in the manner fol.
lowing: "Zwei, zwei," said !, not more beer.
but zwei." after which lucid explanation she
vanished again and brought two more
mugs, at which Damphool stopped laugh
ing long enough 10 tell me that she would
keep bringing pint doses Of Lager rs long
as continued 10 remark "zwe," which
he informed Inc means "two glasses of
Lager, and be in hurry about IL" he
also said the reason she didn't 60 away
when she had served us was because she
wanted her change; paid her the money.
thanked my friend for his gratuitous lesson
IN German, and began 10 drink The first
glass seemed like sour strong beer, with a
good deal of wafer in it; the next was not
quite so sour, and the succeeding one tasted
as il the original beer had been stronger.
and they had not diluted it so much. Then
We rested, and. as had drank three pints
already, | was willing TO stop, but Dam.
rhool assured me, Lager isn't intoxica.
ting" SO, after little settling down, I
thought could hold another glass, and or.
dered 1t; ii was brought by young lady
who seemed 10 me 10 have four ewes and two
noses, pointing in different directions, which
unusual effect was undoubtedly caused by
smoke. Then thought I'd have glass of
Lager, liquid known 10 mos, of the in
habitants of Manhattan. 1t was brought
by girI so pretty, that Immediately or
dered two more, and kept her waiting for
the change each time SO could look at her
then We had some cheese full of holes
then we had some lager 10 fill up the holes
then we took n sausage; Damphool suggest
ed that the sausage was made Of dog; so
we had some Lager TO drown the dog
then we had some sardines; Damphool said
1t would be cruel to keep the fishes
without supply Of the liquid element, so
We had some Lager for the fishes 10 swim
in-then we had some bretzels; Damphool
said Tie bretzels were SO crooked they would
not pack close, so we had some Lager 10
tilI up the chinks then made speech TO
The company; short, but very much TO the
point, and received with applause-ii was
addressed 10 the whole crowd, and was to
this effect; Gentlemen, let's have some La.
ger"
by this lime my friend had by some
mysterious process become mysteriousIy
multiplied, and there were fifty Damphoos,
and they all accepted the Invitation, and
had the Lager-lhere were forty glasses,
and IN trying TO make the circuit of the
room, touching my glass to every one OF
theirs, fell over table, which very I'M
Pertinently stepped before me-and as
went down | knocked small Dutchman
into the corner, then fell over him, then /
partially recovered myself aud sat on his
head, then demanded an instant apology.
then called for six glasses Of Lager, aud
when tbs girl brought them all in one hand
trled 10 take them all in one hand, but
broke three-thcn | tried 10 drink out Of
The remaining three all al once, aud in so
dong took an involuntary shower bath -
then tiled 10 pay for the whole fifty glass.
es, aud the damage, with Il dime and a
Spanish quarter, and demanded that he
should give my change il gold dollars
there seemed to be some difficulty about
lhis, and II hadn't known that Lager ism.
intoxicating | should have thought the
man was drunk-I was on the point OF
calling ~ policeman to arrest him fof
swindIing When Damphool came aud cx
planned the matter, aud his lhck head at
last comPrehended that was tight.
Little tambonne girl came aloug and
wanted money for man who Was perform.
ing with i great deal Of skill on a crank
=
Danphou! into the tanboume, under the
impression Ihat be WAS luf dollar
finally presented tie ,le gih win my
compliments, two cissrs aud u pcuuy, wi;h
which She went of satisfied
Then | thought III make love TO u pref.
y gir! who had just brought me "a gl.ss OF
Lager e. beverage prevalent in that vicini
ly, and which does not possess any iutoxi
eating Power,) 50 rres>e TO my hear, l,r
about two minutes What supposed to be
her hand, and didn't liud oui ,l,l 5, WIS her
pctilcoa, until | tiled To- kiss ii, and cot
my mouth ig'l oi WOODEN yau-looke,l a,
pretty gIr with Indignation anL asked her
what She mean, dy such coulac,-,hen
had mug Of Lager, Ca liquid Which does
net n'oNicalc, and which Is much used hv
lho German popUdaiion)
Doesiicks having Described a variety q,
queer adventures The result Of lis eyne,i-