Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1857-08-06
fatt, fm1 4 fantg.
Now is the time to improve yourself.
The fire that "went out" has not return

What dc We often drop, yet never stoop
to pick up? A hint.
Pride breakfasted with Plenty, dned
with Poverty, and supped with lntamy.
- Punch teaches bookkeeping in three
words-"Never lend them"
-"The eyes of your beloved, after she has
been crying" Punch calls "ornamental fret
work"
"A correspondent of the Carolina Spar
tan nominates Ex-Gov. James H. Adams,
for the U. S. Senate.
Punch says ga secret, warranted to keep
in any climate, is woman's age" Horrld
Punch
Shakespeare says, "Frailty, thy name is
woman" A French translation has it, "Ma-
damoiselle Frailty is the name of the lady
During recent storm, in De Soto Coun-
ty, Miss, the lightning struck ten negroes
at one dash, one of them seriously.
One of Walkers men, who had a Costa
Rican bayonet at his breast, refused to ask
for mercy because Americans cant take
Spanish quarters now.
- Dobbs says that people who endorse
notes. are called "sureties," for this reason,
that in nine cases out of ten they are "s1re, "
to be called upon for the money
"A little girl, addressing her sister, ask
ed "What was the chaos, Pa was reading
about, to.day?" To which the latter repll-
ed: " Twas great pile of nothing, and no
place to put it in"
"A company of ladies, the other day, dis
cussed the following question "What is the
great duty of man? ?" One of them contend
ed, with success, that it was to pay dry-goods
bills
Near the depot were several Irish dray-
men. Thinking to quiz them, gentleman
shouted to one, "Has the railroad got in =
"One ind has, sir" was the prompt response
knowledge will not be acquired without
pains and application. 1t is troublesome
and keep digging for pure waters; but when
once you come to the spring, they rise up,
and meet you.
An "unfortunate" clergyman undertook
to "give out hymn" in which the word
doxology occurred but as he could not get
hold of the word, he requested the congre-
cation to sing four verses and sochdotoger'
-"Pa, what is the interest ola kiss ?" ask
ed sweet sixteen of her sire. "Well, really,
I don't know. Why do you ask % "Be-
cause John borrowed kiss of me, last night,
and said he'd pay it back with interest after
we were married"
Visitors at Niagara Falls will remember
staircase On the west side of Goat Island
called "Biddle Staircase" Some one asked
friend why it was called that name. "Be-
cause it acound up the Janh," Was the an
swer.
-oSir," said Toms father, "you should
have a place for everything" "Well, re-
piled the Junior, ~ have great many places
for everything" The bump of "order" was
in the decendant-"wit" in the ascendant
of that Uranium.
"A transcendental preacher took for his
text, "Feed my lambs" A plain farmer
ouainly remarked to him, on coming out OF
the church, GA very good text, sir, but you
should take care not to put hay so high in
the rack that lambs can't reach it."
The editor of the Batt7c-ore Of Freedom
and 7omahawk Of Liberty, writing from
Philadelphia, after hearing Miss Louisa PyDe
sing the song of the "Skylark," says: "Her
voice is delicious, pure as the moonlight,
and as tender as three shilling-shirs."
A Yankee went to market to buy saus-
ages. He held out link to his dog, but be
refused to eat "What is the matter with
them saussages?" angrily inquired the deal
er. "O," said the Yankee, "I've nothing
agin' 'em, only dog won't eat dog, that's al"
"A correspondent says that the Fremont
and Dayton flag, used at Stockbridgc, Madi-
son county, during last falls campaign, has
been hung up this spring in corn field as
"scare crow" Doubtless it proved efica-
cious, if crows know anything of politics.
-"Please, sir" said beggar to Scroggs
the other day, "couldn't you give me little
something? I'm a bricklayer, but had bad
fall when at work at my business, and have
to live on charity, sir" "Nonsense," ans
wered Scroggs, ~ had not only bad fall,
at my business, but bad winter, too, and
not much of spring. I think you ought
to give me something!"
- Tables have been published of the births,
deaths, ana marriages, in single year, in
England and Wales, of some of the more
numerous of those English families whose
surnames are derived from occupation. 1t
appears from these statistics, which are re-
liable, that every year 5,5SS Smiths are
born, 4,O44 Smiths die, and 1905 Smiths,
determined to preserve the Smith family
from extinction, do marry.
The professions of the signers of the
Declaration of Independence were as follows: {:
Printers, l; Lawyers, 10; Physicians, j;
Farmers, 6; Merchants, 6; shoemakers, l; !;
Gentlemen, 6; Sailors, l; Ministers, l !;
Surveyors, l; Soldiers, l. The place of
nativity of the signers was as follows: Mas
sachusetts, 8; Virginia, 8; Pennsylvania,
6; Maryland, 5; Rhode Island, 2; Maine,
l +; Connecticut, 2; New York, 8; New Jer-