Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1857-09-10

DEAR CHRONICLE: Lest the world might
never know that such town as Somerton,
was commenced and carried ~ to its present
position, duriug the last half centuary; and
inasmuch as our locality has not been mark
ed upon any map of the world which have
ever seen; | wish TO apprze you, that we
have real, positive local existance; which
! to US, it would be exceedingly gratifyin g
that you might find in some of your perre-
CARNATIONS.
You will find us some where in the S. E.
Corner of Somerset Tp., little above the
head OF navigation, ON the unobtrusve
waters of Captna famed in days Iof yore
for certain etcetries. Our town possesses
numerous advantageous in addition to The
impossibility of loosing our urchins in the
ramificatious, intersections, and labyrin,hs
of streets, lanes, courts and allys. We
have our plain street clean through. sufi-
cienty wide for sober people, such as we
are, to navigate at all hours of the day and
night with two or three roads turning to
right and left leading to other villages no
better known than ourselves. You see we
are not selfish, we admit of ingress and
egress and especially the latter, in cases of
all loaters, whisky wagons, rumselers and
5lacklegs; and your city gents who would
c.me here TO corrupt the morals and blast
the reputation of our law abiding citizens.
Most of our buildings are quite substan-
tiate, some, we think. really elegant, taste
fully adorned " ith shade and shrubbery, be-
sides the magic touch of paint has not been
wholly forgotten. Our public buildings con-
sist of three Churches, Methodist, ,Hicksites
and Orthodox. though one; the Orthodox, is
a lew rods distant from town. A neat sub
stanliat two story brick school house, the
upper story being occasionally used as tenn
perance hall &c. By the by, speaking of
temperance, reminds me of our recent meet
ings of which we have had two, and intend
to follow il up;-yeu shall hear from us
again on this score.
We have three stores doing believe a
respectable business. We are not annov-
ed however with your great numbering,
snorting, putting, smoking, sinking cars,
scareing our horses, pigs, and children to
death; nor even with your great wire, you
make so much fuss about, looking like an
endless cloths!ine for the sons and daughter.
of Anak and Philom McCule, to hang their
unmentionables upon. We have two legged
telegraphs sir, who can convey tidings all
round The town in far less time than you
could get your ixens in order, then we're
in no danger of being struck to death by
lightning by them',r 5arberous things
f However must not weary the life out o.
, you this time | know little of what life
poor Editor has to live being almost in.
side of printing office once myself, at least
was on the pavement before the door
) just step this way Mr. Editor, a word il
! private with you-vou recollect the fate o
:, poor Pillgarlick' under the patronage o
e the "Honorable Mrs. Fan-tad-lin" it is salt
= the old dame was very prolific and he
r daughters, who are as numerous as the 9th
S er "tads'' with tails, have annoyed other
g as well as 'the strolling Manager and 'hav,
sometimes spoiled papers as well as theoters
d If you be kind TO us, MS know you will
g you may hear again from this corner of oil
g Belmonts neral vinysrd.
Aug. 29th 1857. SoMERToN.