The true Democrat., 1857-04-28
The Rachelnr and Rahv

"What shall I do?'' and the old bachelor stamped about the sitting room in perfect rage of doubt, looking first at the mapping babe in the little willow cradle, and then at the busy French clock on the mantle shelf.
 "As sure as my name is Joseph Phelps, that little, two- listed, large lunged nephew of mine is about waking, and it wants one whole hour of the time which its mother appointed for her return. Whew! actually sweat thinking about 1t. What can do with it-how can 1 treat 1t to sugar what dye call ems or hold it, or trot 1t, or do anything with it?'
 At this juncture faint wall from the baby receptacle brought bachelor Joseph to his tabs. With an energy and aacrity that would rot lily become husband and baby tender, he commenced rocking the cradle, sending the n- dignant baby into perfect tremor of kicks and squalls Backwards and forwards, from one side of the pillow to the other, the round face rolled; the infant fists were clenched with force that purpled them; while from the white plump throat came a cry that set the bachelor wild with fear.
 A gain J Joc looked at the clock.
 "What in the deuce can do?'' he exclaimed, viewing, woeiuliy the little nfiamed face be- fore him.
 He sat down in big chair before the baby spread a double cradle-qult over his knees, and with look of terror upon his face, proceeded to take baby from it's resting place. He drew the young hopeful into his lap, just as very neat old lady would pick ur pocket hand kerchief, with his thumbs and fingers. fresh yell from the rosy mouth of the baby was the only expression of thanks as he commenced the never-out- of- fashion baby trot.
 :" It must be that something is prcking him. Shoo, shoo!' said Joe, commencing q search for the aggravating pin, that was driving the child into such rage. But no pin was to be found and he made an attempt to turn baby over, but oh the clumsiness of his fingers-the little eel like form fell out of his lap to the floor, send ing forth a cry that was [" louder, clearer, dead Tier than before.'
 "Lord save me, Tve broken its neck,'' was the exclamation as he picked baby up, and in the agony of despair tried to quiet him. A thought struck Joe. He saw basque hang ing against the wall of the adjoining bedroom, and with smile of delight upon his counte- nance ne went for it. Sure enough, there 1t was, stuffing, boldice and all real monument of feminine ingenuity. He was wild with joy. He pinned 1t over his coat, and fastened the sleeves behind him. He took baby and laid its head against the false breast work.
 Shades of southern plantations and cotton | nose into it about mile, then cuddled for a snooze. Then the bachelor commenced sing | ing
 Women are all a tieeting show For mans delueion given, When filled with bran and stuffed with tow,
 They look quite well"
 A tap upon the door stopped Joe in the midst of his suggestive song, and before he had time to disarray himself, the door was opened, and rogush, laughing pair of eyes peered in upon him.
 Your sister is not at home, is she?" chir- ruppei the visitor.
 No, ma'am.' stammered Joe, growing very red in the face; and have turned nurse"
 Miss Hayes laughed offered to relieve him of his charge which he willingly consented to, sitting pear by the wale, intentIy Watching her.. She managet baby to charm, without the basque, and Joe was captiyated.
 Joseph Phelps married Fanny Hayes-upon my word, he did.