Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1857-12-09
MISCELL A n Y .
A few Truths Which Good Many Should
Know.
TAKEN FROM A GENUINE COPY.


Miss - am little afraid you and /
shall never come together. There is that expec-
tation of flattery about you WHICH cannot bear,
vet as love you well enough to he honest-a
bold word that--I will once for all speak my
mind, and desire your attention.
| believe don't admire nor value you for any
of those charms for which you admire and val
ne yourself; do not for instance, pay any ado
ration to the present brightness of your eyes,
because | am so strange fellow as to consider
them philosophically. They are very brilliant
to be sure, but what are they What are they
Miss a6origine? Fops, fools and puets would,
in their usual airy manner, tell you that they
were made of celestial fire, that they were two
animated beads of beauty, two love-darting
mirrors, formed by the graces, and pack of
sucb stuff But scorn to figure away at the eX-
pense Of fair truth.
| write in honest prose, Miss; and therefore
in honest prose tell you that those same balls
eff ethereal beauty, those same love-darting mir
rors. are at best two pieces Of ordinary clay var
nished. The varnish, allow, is good, and well
put on. But what of all this9 AIN not so
short sighted but can look forward little, be-
yond the length of my nose, to the times when
the Japan of nature will be utterly gone, and
not a spark of fire will you have about you. If
you live long enough you will be purblind, and
then what becomes of your love- darters. Don't
be quite so vain, my young beauty.
Another mighty matter upon which you have,
it seems, to pique yourself, is your face. mean
such things as we call cheeks, lips, and complex
ion. | wish it to be known to you that have
but poor opinion of these divine graces as you
cal them.
Some tire ago. remember you showed me
in a great air of triumph, paper scrawled upon
by some forid puppy Of your acquaintance, who
swore in very sorrowful 7erses, that your cheeks
threw into utter dispair all the roses and lilies
in the creation. Your skin too, was, If recol
lect. polished marble. The veins were colnpar-
ed to the azure OF the third heaven, and the col
or was whittier than alabaster
,Tis lie Miss. 'Tis sad e You are in
debted to poetcal fiction for all this truth. The
rogues who deal in il have rs they say, license
from that fellow Appees to play such pranks
with idle girls aud boys who believe them. For
INV part never could be taken in by the tag OF
rhyme. nor the cadence OF a couplet, nor the
transportation or ten saucy syllables, since
was born l always looked upon them as mere
ear traps.
For instance now, your bosom il said to be
mn, er than the driven snow. Ii thI Is not car
inr the lest as far as it will fairly go, l don't
know what is. Why, il your bosom and snow
hall were shown together, and anything III tie
world but poet to judge, he would say that
Won were swarthy GipSey in the comparisnn.
But how you ladies can be pleased with all this
hiyh-flying is to lie astonishing. 1t II man were
ro compare me to u stick or u stone, Or tree,
or a plant, that was nomore like than like the
main ocean, should hold up my head. and look
about me the more for that! AS to features,
skin, complexion, &C., they are SO truly things OF
a day that if | was Il woman should DO afraid
TO nut any trust in them. They have more enc
mics than the ever prosecuted have; could re-
count such catalogue as would make
"Your hair 10 stund on end
Like qullls upon porcupine."
Go into your garden. Fix your attention on
the fairest flower Take care that it is in the
luxuriance of its bloom. Did you ever behold
tints more exquisite, seollops moree xact colors
better mixed, or beauties better varied9 Now
leave it. Pay it q second visit to morrow NOR
ming. What are you surprised at? That q
flower should fade A light blast of wind in
the night hath wholly destroyed it. The tints
are dead The colors are faded. The beauty
is no more. Step to your toilette. Indeed Miss
you are very pretty. What face, what an air,
what shape! In the evening one Of the thou
sand enemies of handsome features overtakes
you, and your second visit to The glass shows
you-an ugly woman.
believe you have sense enough Miss, to see
where to all this tends:-it tends to your des-
tructon. would not have you fix too violent
dependence on features. Nondo | estimate you
according to your wealth-certain it Is you will
be independent, but wish you were not so fas-
cinatng with these possessions. heard You
talk in such raptures OF a new carriage, dia-
monds and new clothes, that am much afraid
you are gone far in the .trippanies of life. q
Slight fever would soon show you the impotency
of gold, and it would divest you Of all the trap
pings in which you have 50 wantonly dressed
the finest set of limbs in the country.
What collection of tal,ities is here indeed
never saw pair of cheeks in my life that were
fairer than lilly, nor pair OF lips that were
redder than rose. As to AlabaSter, will take
half so white in the whole world and should
be very glad to see complexion SO well polish
ed as piece of Egyptian marble.
No, no, these flights will not pass upon men
of cool prose. They will not, indeed, Miss
Metaphor, my dear, is mere balm. II tckles
the chld's ear, but heartily despse it. Not
but that give to fair form its proper portion
of praise. am perfectly sensible TO handsome
features. like to see the proper proportions ot
red and white, amvery well pleased with
pair of sparkling eyes, but | have no idea OF
calling any of these what they really are not,
nor of comparing them with objects to which
. h.,,n L. L