Weekly hawk-eye and telegraph. [volume] (Burlington, Iowa) 1855-1857, 1857-04-15

IA 1rlep0 fnfofmo ", Aks Uy early Q1WB
Yesterday morning two small boats, each con
tanning two men besides the oarsmen, were
seen hurrying r,ysteriously down the river
- the south Carolina shore. Ourinformant
| followed to see the cause. The parties ar
rived on q .saiubsious spot I. there was some
| talk, some walking backward and forward,
and something mysterious in the whole STAIR.
Two of the party went apart and opened Q
case in which, 10 their evident surprise, they
/ found two large syringesl The seconds be.
gan mutually upbraiding each other with
| having perpetra.ed the hoax The prlnci-
pals, WHO had stood apart with armes folded,
having a keen appreciation for the bnriesqne,
and seeing the ridiculous turn OF affairs, burst
out laughing, shook hands with each other
and ran to prevent their seconds from light
| ing They hurried baekzto town, and all
the affair might get Wind
/ John Phoenix en- Route for New Orleans
! .JoHS PaoEsTx,p in aletter which is pub
lished in the April number of the Knicker-
l booker, describes his trip from Boston to
New Orleans The letter is irresistably COM
/ lie, of course, butwe can only give our read
ers q taste Of its quality and contents. He
says:
aOn the fifth Of January, at eight A. NJ, l
left the fremont House in q hackney car
riage, the wheels whereof had turned into
runners. This method Of progression, rem
dered necessary by the deep SHOWS, is consid
cred great amusement at the North. Be
ing particularly dangerous to life and limb,
and usually terminating in pulmonary con-
sumption, the pastime is very properly called
sleighing"
There is a sharp satire in the following
sentence, which will readily be appreciated
by railroad travellers
"On entering railroad car the first OBJ
ject of the:soltary, traveller should be to secure
an entire seat to himself This may gener-
ally oe done successfully by taking the out.
side seat and skilllully depositing small
carpet bag, grea.-coat, umbrella and cane, 80
us to cover the inner one. AS the passeng-
ers throng into the car, many will gaze earn
estly at the place thus occupied, but will US.
ually prefer to move on rather than give you
trouble; but if the car is quite filled, the
question will undoubtedly be asked, is that
seat taken sir? when you should reply, with
an imperturable countenance, tits, sir and
the inquirer, with perhaps slight glance OF
suspicion, will move on. AS mans object
should be to make himself as comfortable as
possible in this world, that his mind may be
in n proper frame to prepare for the next, a
slight deviation from truth for the purpose of
securing this object, like the above, is quite
pardonable.' a
Moralizing on the nuisances which infest
the cars-the small boy with the newspapers
the dirty boy with the pop-corn-the big
boy with the fearful apples and the well
| lac, l. A., a.,
enses-John Phoenix says the boy with the
ACCORDION had not yet got so far north. 1t
was but the week before that he met him on
the Philadelphia cars:
ut was after eleven clock the train had
passed New Brunswick, and the passengers
were trying to sleep, Cha! ha y when the boy
entered. He was a seedy youth, with seal
skin cap, singularly dirty face, a gray jack
remarkably broad pair Of corduroy cordu-
roys' He wore an enormous bag or haver-
sack about his neck, and bore in his hand
hat most detestable instrument, an accor-
leon despise that instrument of music.
They pull the music out of it, and it comes
forth reluctant like a cat drawn by the tail
rom an ash hold, or a squirrel pulled shrek
| ing from a hollow log with ramrod This
| thing and Mortified US with the most awful
version of that wretched Dog Tray that | ev
~ listened to- Then he walked around the
ear and collected forty-two cents. Then he
returned to the center Of the car, and stand
ing close to the stove, which was red hot
| the night being cold-he essayed to pull out
Pop Goes the Weasel, when suddenly went
pop the boy he dropped the ACCORDION,
/ Inn into taar nd cfa han ho-
| mind him, executed a frantic Dance accom-
panied by yels of the most agonzing char
acter saw it all and felt grateful to re-
tributive Providence. He had stood too
close to the stove, and his corduroys were in
a light blaze; a few inches below the termin
alton Of the gray jacket, was the seat of his
woe. After he got on fire the conductor put
him out, and sweet and inehible calm came
over me. | realized that whatever is, is
right, and fell into a deep and happy slum-
her"
| Observing that there was always one car
provided for the ladies and gentlemen with
ladies', much nicer and more comfortable
than the rest, he concluded to play trick
to gain access to it. He thus describes the
mode adopted to get past the brakeman who
| stand guard at the door:
|
forth, and seeing nice young person, with
| portmantcau urging her way through the
crowd, stepped up to her and with my ma
tive grace and gallantry offered her my arm
and assistance. They were gratefully &C.
cepted, and proud of my success, ushered
my fair charge up to the platform of the Ia
dies car. Ny old enemy was holding the
door: is that your lady, siry-said he
| With an inward apology to Mrs. Phoeniz for
the great injustice done to her charms by the
admission, replied Yes Judge ofmy hor-
ror, when this low employee of a monopoliz-
ing and unaccomodating railroad company,
addressing my companion with the tone and
manner of an old acquaintance, said: Well,
sal, guess you've done well, but l don't
think his family will think much Of thematch
However got into the ladies car, and hay
ing repudiated the young person Sarah, got
an exceedingly pleasant seat by the side of Il
very warm and comfortable young lady of a
sleepy turn and quiet disposition.
Passing over his account of the stop at
Albany, the journey to Buffalo where he saw
nothing but a railroad depot, but concluded
that if the cold continued the Buffalo girls
couldn't come out tonight" we are introduc-
ed to another model railroad traveller in the
following paragraph:
Gan day and night we ground along, Trip
ping and starving" We passed through Co
iumbus where the people had been having a
Grand ball to celebrate the completion OF
their State Capitol and picked up three hun
dred and eighty-four survivors, each of whom
contained pint and half of undiluted
whiskey And SO in the morning we come
to Cincinnati, where for fifteen minutes we
:arried at the Burnett House, the most mag
niicent hotel in the United States. Here |
met with Fisher, the celebrated railroad tray
eler, who accompanied us TO Sandoval, and
with whom was particularly charmed
Fisher is the original inventor of that ingen-
;ous plan of getting rid of an unpleasant oc-
cupant OF the same seat, by opening win
dow on the coolest night, so that the draught
shall visit searchingiy the back Of the vic
| TIM $ neck, and of that method of taking up
the seat and disposing it as inclined plane,
and going to sleep thereon IN such a eompii-
| Gated manner MS to defy subsequent intru-
sion. What he does not know about rail
roads is of no manner of consequence and
4 nc alasS ~ ocor;ra Thant IA, n is aSuarianca