Republican vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1857, 1857-11-28
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A Good joke.

! Cedar County, winch, as We nave never
seen in print we consider it worth re'a-
ting. The circumstance happened some
time ago, but vii! lose nothing by its age
1t was told by one who knew, and who said
it was all true
A certain young man in search of wife,
being on counting expedition, as is custo-
mary with young men, came late on Sun
day evening, and in order to keep his Sc
rcret from his young acquaintance. de-
tcrmined to be at home on Monday morn
ing, bright and early, SO that his absence
would not be noticed. But his afianced
lived several miles from the town in which
he soiourued aud SO, to overcome the dis
lance required the use of horse. Noun
ted on his horse, dressed in his fine white
summer pants, and other fxens in proper
,,aion, he arrives at She residence of his ina
morata, where he is kindly received. and
his horse properly taken care of, by being
turned into the pasture for the night
The evening the night-passed a
way, but how is nobody's business. Three
o clock in the morning arrived. Our hero
was awakc-may be he had been go all
night--but it matters not three o'clock is
the time for him to depart so that he might
arrive at home before his comrades were
stirring. Not wishing to disturb the fami-
ly of his lady-love, who were then wrapt in
the arms of Morpheus, he sailed forth to
the pasture to catch his horse /; but here
was difficulty grass was too high and
loaded with dew. To venture in there
with his white pantaloons would rather take
the starch out Of them. and lead to detec-
ton 1t would not do to put on his white
unmentionables so he quickly made re-
solve. 1t was three O'Clock in the morning,
and nohody stirring, SO he carefully dis
robes himself Of his valuable whites and
places them In safety on the fence, while he
gives chase with nnscrcened pedals through
the wet rraes after the horse. But the
steed was fond of clover, and had no notion
of leaving it. But our here was not to be
thwarted although he began Is realize the
truth of the old adagc about the course of
truc-love. &c, and finally the horse was
captured.
Returning to the fence whore he had
safely suspended hislilly white unmentiona-
blcs o. mirabile dictu what horrible
sight met his eyes The field into which
his horse had been turned was not only Il
horse pasture" but 'calf PASTURE too,
and the naughty calves, attracted by the
white flag on tue fence had almost eaten
them up only a few well chewed frag-
ments of this once valuable article ST his
wardrobe now remained-only a few threads
j Just sufficient to indicate what they had
ouce been What pickle this was for a
nice young man to be in
4 1t was now daylight, and the industrious
farmers were up and about, and our hero
far from hcme, with no covering for his
travelling apparatus" 1t would rot do
to go back to the house of his lady-love, as
they were now up, and how could he get in
without exhibiting himself to his fair one,
which might ruin his match No, no. that
would net do. Neither could he 90 to town
in that plight. There was only one source
left him, and that was to secrete himself in
the bushes till the next night, and then get
home under the cover of the darkness. -
This he resolved to do, and accordingly hid
himself under a t!.iek growth of bushes.
Safely hid he remained under the pro-
lection o. the bushes for some time; and it
may be imagined that his feelings toward
the calf-kind were not of the most friendly
character, hut ere long his seclusion was
destined to be intruded upon. The family
of the fair enc, seeing his horse stilremsin-
ing in IKE pasture, inquired Of the lady
what she had done with her lover She
was on7plpssod She only knew he had
left about three clock in the morning.
Things didn't look right; if he had gone
why did he leave his horse? Suspicious
were awakened BY and by, the boy, who
had been eat to feed the calves. returned
with the remnants Of TIE identical white gar
meNts which adorned the lower limbs of
their late visitor. They were mangled and
torn to threads An inquest was immedi-
atelv held over them. Some awful fate had
befallen the young man. The neighbors
were summoned to search fer his corpse,
and the posse, with all speed set out with
dogs AVID arms to the search. The pasture
was thoroughly occurred, and then the ad
jacent thickets, when, 10 our hero was
driven from his hair by the keen scent Of the
dogs, all safe, alive, and well, but pinus
the linen. Nm explanation then cnsued at
the expense OF oar hero, but he was Sue
cessfnl in the end. and married the lady,
and is now living comfortably in cue Of the
little towns of Iowa
The Sober. Second Thought. President
Van Buren,, in one of his messages, speaks
of "the sober, second thought of the people
-Snllom wronp and ALWAYS efficient - md