Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1857-06-12
Comets ana .. s,ch Like >, d no-axes."

something else of tina kind, and the fixing about IN
the way of cordage gave rise to the rumour that
professor of the tight rope then performing at one OF
the theatres, was going to fly down from the top OF
the monument on certain day, and at certain hour
Accordingly on that day and for long time previous
to that hour, which was three P. M, large crowd
assembled and kept assembling, cheered by the De-
nevolent hope of seeing The man break his neck, OF
at least knock his brains out Among those collect
&c vas big, seven foot and half printer, rejoicing
in the Miligan. man given to exhortatioh anu
the use of extensive words. " Ladies anu geh'Ae-
men, said the long man, as the hour OF three ap
preached " Ladies and gentlemen, in precisely htteen
minutes, the individual will perform his grand @riai
flight" Ladies' md gentlemen" said he again look
ing at his watch, the time approxlma'es' III 1Sh
minutes, the fact will be accomplished" hauieS
and gentlemen, the hour has arrived" Inc houf
had arrived, but not the man. Minutes gre" ln'o
half an hour and then approached the tuIl Aouf Oh
four and the long kept his stand " the observer
of all observers" announcing the progress OF lime
and keeping up the spirits OF the ANXIOUS moufher0
At length the clock struck FOUR and as the long
man listened an idea seemed to dawn upon him as IL
were,-he suddenly stuck his watch into pocket
situated about yard and quarter from his heao'
and ward and half from his feet, exalted himself
unon his Toes until he looked like three story man
amid group of human shanes lifted up his voice
IN the tones of an orator, and exclaimed, =" Ladies
and pentlenen have come to the solemn and dehD-
crate conclusion here the old Adam arose "i'hlh
him. and the feelings of the natural man prevailed
over the dignity of the orator and the pleIy OF the
exhorter s'Yes, ladies and gentlemen. haze come
to the solemn and deliberate conclusion that IT'S all
id hoax "Youre another, sa;d sma ii boy on the
outskirts of the crowd and rotten orange was seen
TO come into iorcible contact with the long mans
nose. whose exalted head suddenly Disappeared, |
while his great carcass borne off upon two chips
Ladies and gentlemen" the time approaches
wherein and whereupon the comet IS 10 strike the
earth. Yes, ladies and gentlemen" the great wan
derer with the long tail is TO come into collision with
this mundane sphere at precisely fifteen minutes TO
four, on The afternoon of Saturday next, the 18TH
inst, so says DR.. Cummings, and Sc also prognos'l-
cate certain German astronomers, with names SO un-
pronounceabIe that man can take them IN vain
names, The very pronunciation of which has added
their own heads, and driven them into state OF
chronic muddlitude. |
But where's the comet q Nc such body approach |
es-there is no comet there is chance for 81 |
comet and the Reverend exhorter, the great preach
er, the mighty DR.. Cummings, no doubt lbegins to
conclude with the longtudinous Milligan, that its
all - he ak And the waiting crowd of comet
expectors will come to the conclusion that he's
another, and metaphoricaly speaking, will commence
hitting him on the nose with rotten oanges and car
rying him out upon two chips
But oh, worthy and respected reader OF these grave
and solemnIy instructive lines let us look around US
a little and we will find many solemn hoax "
besides Cummings and the long printer. We are
threatened every day with social, financial and pc
ltical comes which don't strike. Great and -xten-
sive people are 10 fly up and fly down in the most
prodigious and amusing manner and they DON'T
Parties are to rise upon the Iuns" ETC., and they
dou't Great bills are to be passed, giving veybody
ything but they are not passed. and the people
who get up the rumor know that it is only no AK"
Therefore, OH much believing and credulous reader
beware of three story proes ions and extensive prom
ises The world VIII go on, and no comet will strike
it. What you get must be worked for anu no big
bill will distribute money into your pocket by any
| hoCus-pocus. Only keep your eyes open That too
much don't be taken out There was bird once, a
raven Il mag pic or some other bird, that sat upon
q log, and had nice piece of cheese in It's BILL and
under the log clear pool of water, in which
was r fecred the bird and its cheese, and the
notion entered its head that it saw another
bird in possession of another piece Of cheese, and it
fapped It's wings and famed its tail and DARED down
after the provender, and in attempting to grasp at
the shadow in the water dropped the substance of
which that was but the 1efection. The people are
| in the Same positon-they pointed to the money
| ,tofR ha Init ID 2fofoc
| to be distributed TO them-money which must first
come out Of their own pockets and in diving after
hatrefecon they the risk of losing the substance,
or even if they get some of back it will be used up
and diminished, and be draggled by being drawn
through the Federal pond Beware of t. ho-axes."
o. Some of the foolishly rabu Know Nothing
organs in Baltimore trying to make talk over
! the Marines called out to preserve the peace at
Wasi ington City {" foreign mercenares." 1t turns
out that the majority of the marines so engaged were
native born young men, principally from Pennsyl-
vania and Virginia, and the remainder We marines
long in the service and fought bravey in Mexico
But no matter where they from they were there
in the discharge of painful duty imposed upon
them BY the lawless interference of others with the
freedom of elections. They there in obedience
to ORDERS and all classes of law abiding citizens Of
native or foreign birth will sustain them.
SrRANGE.-The body of the young female found
in the Hudson river near Newburg, New York, has
been twice positively identified, and persons lodged in
Jail for the murder of the persons supposed to be
dead and vice said dead person, have made their
appearance alive and kicking. The last affair was
with negro man named Brown, who felt certain
that the body was that of his wife, as did other par