Smyrna times., 1857-04-15
Written for the Smyrns Times.
Local Young America on Old Fogvism.

2 MT E0uOr ;-Our idol-splrit, (beloved God
dess , Strect-Extension, is gone and, by the
late storm, we are left, without hope, for the
next twelve months, to promenade the paths so
often trod by our Old Fogy fathers, minus
single newly-opened avenue to cheer us in our
travels Yes. sir, the recent Jury Decisions
have, like "wild deluges," come upon our
Glory. Tracks, and rubbed them out of exist
ence, leaving alone the lanes of TIME and
MONEY MIs.sPENr as glorious relics Of our
worthy cause. And now, though beaten out"
and feeling as =" fat as founder" in conse-
quence, am, nevertheless, as " firm as a rock"
such waters of opposition being too soft to
affect me materially; for, stand at the head
Of party of noble philanthropists, knowing
that the world would never have been made for
me, had it been intended that should bow sub |
missively to the power of old-fashioned ma
chinery, or yield to the influence of stubborn
Fogyism. No, sir; the fair prospects of Crea-
ton itself tell us of our ONWARD destiny
and we intend to work unitedly and unceasing-
ly for the progress of mprovement-carrying
with US, as far as possible. every project that
will, in the least, tend to further that object,
and remaining at our posts of duty till every
Old Fogy in the town hides himself in sack
cloth and ashes, on account of his sins against
us, or s totally exterminated. Then, and only
then, will we rest from laboring our aspirations
being attained.
True, these Old Fogies can talk quite loudly
hain Acro of n,,d
the like, and can pompously boast, too, of their
willingness TO sacrifice o little tor the public
good,-but, it is plain, they speak thus, only
with view of selfaggrandizement: they de-
sire honorable positions in society, and know
they wouldn't stand even I" the ghost of a
chance" if they didn't wear smiling faces of
hypocrisy. They sacrifice for the public good
why, don't believe they'd ever sell pint
of milk, if they didn't know it was halt water.
And, then, to test their spirit of Improvement,
just let proposition be made to open u street
through one of their garlic: :fetds,-and, how
quick they huddle together like a parcel of
boobies, raise a flag Of opposition, and, with
their eyes stretched as big as saucers," cry
out monarchy" "ar6itrary pOWer ;" "ty-
rannical stoGy!" dc, in order to relieve the
treasury pap Of few sinners more than they
would otherwise get,-claiming, however, for
their property only reasonable (!) compen-
saton. Aud, just because our commissioners
happen not TO award them sufficient damages to
fence their lots, they appeal, right off, from the
decision of said functonaries, and have a jury
summoned "a monkey-jackel jury at thal) to
determine as to the erpediency of the cOntem-
plated improvement thus doing their utmost
to overthrow the laudable designs and render
void the labors Of our magnanmous represent
tatives, and clearly showing by their acts, which
speak louder than Words, hOW they sympathise
with US. This is certainly a dreadful state OF
affairs. and we should " mark" these o Fogies
the ears OF every one of them should be
crapped. Yes, an evil day, it seems, has come
upon US, but am happy in the reflection that
it will be of short duration,-at least, we shall
not suffer by reason of this outrageous appeal
ng,-which is nothing more than an exhibition
of downright impudence upon the part of our
opponents. They say, the laU gives them the
privilege of appealing frsm the decisions of our
pGrty,-whch, at glance, seems 10 be correct
but, Ican't think the granting of SO high al
immunity upon Old FOgies was ever intended
by the Legisature-such an idea is preposter.
GUS: contrary TO the plain teachings Of common
sense ;-and if they "stiffen their necks v
against US again, move we hold Notification
Meeting, and declare ourselves above the law
then we'll show them whose privilege it is to
think in the matter.
tell you, sir, we are fully aroused at the
present juncture-the PO,Oer is OURS-and
we will yet send some 6iLlets-dOur to the ram.
parts Of the enemy, that will make their little
narrow-cOntracled souls quake within them
Every sidewalks must be paved this season
that's certain; ; and, it this proposition is oppos
ed, we'll not allow an Old Fogy to cultivate O
: single cabbage patch in town for the next five
years. And, moreover, no pig-sty shall be
erected within the limits of the corporation
without the consent of all creation; whilst, the
idea of building a wood-shed shall not be en-.
tertained, without first "applying TO one oil
more of the commissioners for a permit TO dc
the same;" and, furthermore, we intend. that il
complaint, on account of these and other things
in contemplation by us, is made by the Old
Fogies, the companants shall be arrested as a
common nuisance, and, after receiving such
summary punishment as we may direct, sold
out of our bailwck, to the highest bidder, for
cash.-the proceeds Of the sale to go into Ward
g. Cotton's drawer, for a grand jollfcation
supper in honor of your very distinguished con-
tributor.
A stone.wal, see, has been suggested, to
encompass the "city." But, sir, aOe'H have no
such thing zoe wouldn't be pent up here with
the many Old Fogies of this place for the best
terrapin supper that could be served by Dopson.
They need airing. and, without this, it wouldn't
do to go within guns shot of EN-: their close
listed meanness would pollute the atmosphere
and blunt the finer feelings of every young gen.