Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1857-04-14
Tie Garlic Nostrum.

! whole history, some of the political gentlem en- of
the SANGRADo faculty insist that she is in rapid and
| alarming decline. The doctors who have undertaken
her case, IN the galloping consumption under the
rnSages of which they pronounce her TO be wasting
away, seem to observe stint or moderation in he
number of bottles ofCod Liver Oil and Burat
| Brandy, labeled the Distribution Remedy, they are
disposed TO drench her system with. The quantity
of their prescriptions, rather immoderate at first
has grown apace during the forty or fifty days
which have elapsed since they suddenly discovered
the patients alarming condition and whereas at
first this comparatively small matter of42 900 bot
ties of the Remedy was thought sufficient for the
purp Sc of her restoration, now that the last
prescription which has been proposed-that ofDr.
GARLELE, an adventurous quack in of the North
western counties and sort of "dead-shot" pracli-
honer IN matters ofof political diseases no less
quantity than 100000 OF bottles.
Dropping the metaphor, and not to misrep-
resent our distinguished quaek and friend of the
Northwest we will sta tie his prescription in his own
language. 1t will be that he.speaks as glibly
of the charming effect of his remedy upon the reu-
venated system of old Commonwealth as any
true son of Escuaplus and ifit turns out that his
remedy should fail we quite sure he will be the
most astonished human being who shall hear OF the
| fact:
AueEe are now lett ten hundred and SeveutY-Scv-
en- million nine hundred aud eighty thousand
! hVe hundred and cghty-four acres You are enti-
tied TO a; least sixty millions of these acres which
at tne Government price of 81 25 per acre, would
puI lhto your State treasury seventyve millions of
dollars. This would pay your debt and leave you
lorty million dollars to completeEour public works
nSw going 10 decay, and enable you TO construct
others, and provide perpetual fund for the educa-
lon OF every child in the Commonwe Virgin
la In natural resources is the richest State in the
world-rich in her soil, rich in her climate itch in
n lar mir har-
gold, her lron her coal, her gypsum, and her salt
develop these resources, and, instead our people
leaVng thelr native State, they do, by scores
and hundreds, wealth and population would flow
into our borders and crowd our very centre DeveI-,
op thess resources and you furnish the honest abo-
rer employment ut remunera'ive prices. Develop
these resources, aud instead o our growing weaker
and weaker at every decade, as have been in fed
eral strength, until even Ohio, which half century
ago was wilderness, has to-day eight m re repre-
sentatlves in Congress than Virginia we will grow
stronger and stronger, until again reach the po-
sltlon in the Confederacy we have lost, and again
we Will see Virginia the first State Gas she ought al
ways to have been) in the Union in popuatan and in
wealth, ielligence and in patriotism, and in all
that dlgnihes and ennObles man. 80,
1t is not to be doubted that a shower of seventy
five millions of dollars falling copiously out of the
skies upon the hills and val eys of Virginia would
make her very hourishiug State ;aud if you grant
Mr. Garlic the premise that millions OF these yellow
drops are really up in the vaults of the armament
awaiting only vote of the Virginia people 10 fall
like the gentle dews upon fields and meadows
there would be as much sUid argument as poetry in
his PROPOSE ion; but more skeptica far about
.his impending shower of yellow drops than the fa
nous antediluvian whom Noah is said TO have re-
fused admittance into the Ark, who is said to have
cursed the ark and the old navigator and sworn
"there would not be much of a shower after all"-
At all events it would have been wiser for Mr. Car
lille before describing in lively terms what so p:o-
digious windall ofmoney would de for Virginia to
have recollected Mrs GLASS; recipe for the best
mode of cooking hare, the preliminary direction
in which was First, catch your hare :" which
item was followed up with various very savory di-
rectons respecting the preparation of the game after
1t was safely in hand
The difficulties in this whole of distributing
seventy-fve mi lions to Virginia are manifold and
pulling to our matter of fact mind. Virginia for
Instance, cannot get her share Of it without n York.
Pennsylvania, Massachusetts, and the other States
getting theirs. If it merely a matter for Viz
ginia, there is doubt our old Commonwealth
would, with so magnificent sum in hand, resume
her place in the front rank of the Union, the lead
ing State in population, wealth aud prosperity; but
one Of the difficulties about the scheme Of Mr. CAR
LILLE is, that it Virginia should get this sum of sew
entyve millions of dollars it would only be AS her
share of agrand distribution fund for all the States
of which. this portion of hers would he 3 parts out
of an aggregate of 234 parts. Her share being
ST5,o0O,000, the grand distribution fund for all
would be Sl,s92 100000 Cope thousand three hum
dred and thrty-two millions)the other States get
ting the other 22l parts Of this fund =
that is to say, while Virginia would, he Helped for
ward, in the for empiFe With her sister tates,
by S75,ooo,ooo, they wodlds6e helped forward in
their race with her blythe aggregate sum 81 81 2f5-
100000 (tweve hundred and Seventy FIVE mi iioSsl
AN odds against her which we fear would cause
her to be disanced and disappoint Mr. CARL1LEs ex-
pectations in bringing her o6t foremost, fourishirr
and snorting in the race. We fear that New York,
Pennsylvania and Ohio, that are now smartly ahead
of her, would be further ahead after the distribution
than before; for while Virginia would get $3.50
600 of the fund.- New York would get 81 90 600 900,
Pennsylvania would get SI44 900 900, and Ohio
would get Sl2l 900 600.
Rut this is not ALL While virninia would fare
pretty badly under Mr.. CARL1LE's scheme, the whole
South would fare even worse; for the Souths share
being so parts of the fund while the North's would
be l44 parts, while the South would receive $685.
5000, the North would receive $3.50, 100000
Conscious that it is treating ri.iculors subject
with mockery of gravity, let us nevertheless state
the CARLILE system in tabular form. scheme
which would for Virginia S75 100000, would
involve the following items:
GRAND STATEMENT OF THE CARLILE SCHEME
Grand total fund distributed, Sl3a2 100000
Share of the North, s3O,OOOeOO
Share of the South, $4,000 600
Share of New York, 10000 600
Shs of Pennsylvania, l44oOOO0O
Share OF Ohio, l2f 100000
Share of Virginia, 100000
Thus, Mr.. CARIlIE and his party by sort of nat