Mineral Point tribune. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1854-1858, 1857-07-14
DIrQTGD.

~ Laziness travels SO slow that poverty
soon oyertakes her.
- If there be no faith in our word. of what
use are they?
! . Brave actions are the substance of life
and good sayings are the ornaments Of it.
"a Most men employ their first years so as
! to make their last miserable.
/ eE An Irish sailor once visited CITY where,
he said. they coPper-bottomed the tops of the
/ houses with shcet-lead p
! sE-" Ny German friend, how long have YOU
! been married 2 d" Veil, dis ting that dom
! like to talk about, but ven I doe. it seems so
long as It never vas"
sE The man who was moved to tears"
complains of the damPness Of the premises, and
wishes to be moved back again.
sE- An elderly maiden lady requests the
insertion of the following lad Taste-Pretty
yol NJ girls kissing widowers children"
- Men often mistake notirieiy for fame
and would rather be remarked for their vices
and follies than not to be noticed at all
/ - How does a pitcher of water differ from
throwing his wife over bridge a.? One
| is water in the pitcher, and The other is pitch
her into the water.
- In the streets Of Leicester one day, Dean
/ Swift accosted by drunken weaver, who
staggering against his reverence, said, q have
/ been spinning it out" Yes" said the Deaa
/ and now you are reeling it home"
/ - Mrs. Partington says nothing despises
! her much as to people who expect sail
vation, 10 90 to church withou. money when a
coIecti, Is TO tie taken up.
! .Sy-.e Harry. did you ask Hicks for that mon
Ieyt"
Yes"
What did he say ,"
"Nothing he just kicked me into the street
That's all ne said
! s%- A destitute woman called on a certain
family for something to eat. a few dinner rem
nants were put in her basket, and having a
small bag or pillow case in her hand, she was
offered as much corn meal as r1Lld fill it
" No, ma'am was her offended reply, Il am
podr enough, God knows but l can't go corn
meal when l come to that, / mean to starre %
sF Rev Dr., Kirk, in a letter from Manche.-
ter, England, says
! l had in the oldest factory of the town str-
king exhibition of the value of human art and
/ labor pound of cotton was pointed out as
worth pound Of gold. Its cost az crude cot
ton may have been eight cents. And as curl
o-ity of art, was shown a pound of cotton spun
( into thread that would 90 round our globe at
the equator. and tie in good large knot of ma
ny hundred miles in length
! FUNNY DEFINITIONS (SoT FAR FROM CORRECT. }
/ Parasol-A protection against the sun used by
ladies made OF cotton and wlalbone.
! Straps-An article worn under the boots OF
gentlemen made of calf-skin.
kites-Light frames covered with papers sent
into the air by boys with tails to them.
- The following is a genuine Hibernsn
advertisement" Missing from Killarney Jane
! O'Fogerty; she had in her arms two babies and
a Gurnsey COW, all black with red hair, and
tortoise she'll combs behind her ears, and large
black spots down her back, which squiLss aw-
fully"
rAsHIoNABE WoMES-Fashion kills more wo
men than tolI or sorrow Obedience TO fashion
IS greater transgressiou OF the laws of woman ;:
nature, a greater injury to her physical anc
mental constitution, than the hardshfps of pov.
/ erty and neglect. The slave women at her task
will live and grow old, and see two or tbre,
generations OF her mistresses pass away. Th,
washerwomeg with scarcely ray of hope 7.
cheer her In her tolls, will live to see her fash
ionable sisters die all around her, and the kitch
5 en- maid is hearty and strong when her lady ha
TO be nursed like sick baby. 1t is sad trutl
! that fashioned -pampered women are almos
worthless for all the great ends OF human life