Butte record. (Bidwell, Butte County, Cal.) 1853-1858, 1857-05-09


upon u very learned dissertation on
heads, which, lest you may fail tie pnt
under the appropriate head, | request
you to place under the head of heads. ,
Now whether an idea will be hatched
by an incubation OF not am not, at
this moment fully prepared to say
but am of opinion that they are bad
eggs,' on account of SO many being
added.
There is great variety of heads, a
fact which l huve learned by long ex.
perience and great observatinn--both
animate and inan,mate the most prom
inent of which are the dough heads, the
mutten heads the Iiullet heads, the
leather h"ads, the heads Of sermon,
the head Of a family, the head of the
heap, and he head of navig tin. Up
en- these heads we will make few re-
marks, in the order in which they oc.
cur, for the instruction OF your read
erss
The dough heads are far the most
numerous class Of heads, there being
large plurality of ths human family
who carry about these pastry balls,
with the view of trying to make us be-
lievo they are the Simeon pure cocoa
hut filled with the rich milk of CONS
men sense. do not desire to be invi.
dious, but 1 will illustrate the above
proposition by referrigg to the Calico
party and the legislature of Cal,for-
MIA. Now, in the name of tho great
Mogul,' my patron saint, what lady,
with head leavened with the yeast of
common sense, and baked in the Dutch
oven Of experience, would ever couceal
thousand dollars worth of ctinoline.
hoops, satin, lace, and 'Go,hic termin-
ations,' with gown of ten cent cali
CO, What a set of legisla' ors. with
heads no harder than fresh baked
spongo-cake, would sit three months
and allow the whole world to abuse
poorCalifornia for not paying her debts
when they possess the power TO save
the humiliation of bankruptcy To
close this appthegm, I will f arlessly
assert, as my opinion, that the dough
head members Of the calico party will
ruin the dough head members of the
Legislature, and that the dough head
members Of the Legislature will ruin
tho reputation of the State. What a
catastrophe of dough heads
The mutton heads are sort of olea-
ginous institutions, and of necessity
rather hard to handle. They should
more properly be called putty heads.
They are usful in stopping up the
seams and hol"s Of the social circles,
their susceptibility of indentation ena-
bling them to 6ll any position from
pollution 10 merchants clerk. Rath-
er good kind of head
Now come the mu let heads. They
go aw,mming around in everybody's bu-
siness, and butt up against the net of
circumstances with an energy truly
surprising. The neither think, hear
nor see, and the first thing they know,
they are caught and swallowed whole
by a shark. Mullet heads amt worth
minding.
Leather heads are tough subjects, l
assert it on the authority of Webster,
and will stretch vastly and endure a
great amount of hammering--the more
hanmering the better. Leather heads
generally take to the l~arnrd profess
81 ms, for which their pl,ability pecu>
liarly fits them. Who has not seen
the pliab,,ty Of lawyers head to
skin his client, the quack head to get
bill into a rich mans estate, a
preachers head, TO procure a co letIon
or dinner of 'yaller' legged chick
enss
Now for the heads Of sermon. All
who has not experienced soothing
drowsiness steal over him at head
.tenthly' of three hours sermon of
modern preacher, and tha. too, as dry
as California in the month of August ?
The heads ola sermon are sort OF mys-
tic heads, which congregations, not full
ly understanding, use as sort oil mar
co,ic to cheat time out of "a SundAy af-
ternnon. They are great heads In the
minds of the preachers, but thu con-
gregation, in most instances, would not
be able to see them througe a multnm
in parro microscope. Tnc b-st heads
Of sermon are piety, learning and good
sense, vide sermons Of the Reverend
Dow Jr.