Indiana American. [volume] (Brookville, Ind.) 1833-1861, 1857-03-27
Cos.-Why is vulgar but amiable
-o.,ncr lo1 ~ l,l<o 1.~<...-.. .,,<<-~2


swell, ! think'' said was. "he had
better stop before he reaches pint"
0J"Ksep your dog away from me:"
said dandy to butchers boy.
"Darn the.dog, he's always after pup
pies" said the boy.
o A strange genius. IN describing 4
lake in Minnesota, says it is so clear, that
by looking into il You can see them max
ing tea in China
0-"Nat. wha; are you leaning over
that empty cask for?"
"pm mourning over departed spirits,"
was the answer
W An Infamous bachelor being asked
if he had ever witnessed public execr-
ton, replied, mo but once saw mar
riage.',
GEThe State Of Michigan has 60oo.-
goo acres Of land under the Swamp Land
law.
OF The first Presbyterian church IN
this country was organized in Philadelphia
in 1898.
WELL MATcHED.-We notice the mar
rage in small town in Virginia, of SAM
uel Devil to Mary Shrew. Which is to
be piticd?
OF Leigh Hunt was asked by a lady
at dessert il be wouldn't venture on an
orange.
MADAM, ! should be very happy to do
SO, but indeed am afraid should tum-
bic of.
0T'Zounds, fellow said choleric old
gentleman to very phlegmatic, matter-ol-
fact person, IL shall 60 clean out Of my
witsv
"Well, you won't have Ear to go,' said
the phlegmatic man.
CT A husband advertises thus: sMy
wife, Annie Marie. has ssrayed or been sto-
len. Whoever returns her win get his head
broke. As to trusting her, anybody can
do as he thinks Ct, for, as never pay nv
own debts, It's not likely I'll pay hor'n.a
0>rThis morning friend said to an
lrishman-
"dood morning. Patricls-slippsry this
morning"
slippery? 1t is nothing else, your hon.
or; upon my word, and slid down three
times without getting up once"
or Beautiful Is tho love and swco.
the kiss Of q sister.--oH Paper.
Exctly. and Of a pretty cousin, TOO. II
you have not a sister or cousin Of your
own, try somebody else's sister or cousin
Its all the same.
! G- An Irish posi.boy having driven a
gentleman a long stage through torrents
Of rain. the gentleman said to Paddy
"Aro you very wctf'
"Arah, don't care about being very
wet; but please ycr honor, I'm very Dry
/ 07- Dr. DurbIn, the great Methodist
orator, once attempted 10 preach sermon
from tho text Remembcr Lots wife,, and
made a failure. Afierward remarkIng
70 DR.. Bond that ho did not know tho rsa-
son Of his failure. tho venerable doctor ro-
piled that he'had better thereafter let 9th.
peoples wives alone
OF Whoever wishes 10 got on In the
world has only to take lessons Of hen
chasing grasshopper through tho field.
With long neck and peeled eyes. take a
Few hurried strides, stop short. peep over,
poep under now to the len, then 70 the
right ono iiutter, and you have him.
0cr"I wish you would no, smoke e..
gan," said aplupp little blacl,-cyed elrl
10 her lover.
"Why may not smoke as we'll as
your chimney"
"Bccause chimneys don't smoke whom
they arc in good order"
4 lie has quit smoking.
OF A country editor received the fol.
lowing stop my paper"
"Dcm SIR have looked carefully over
your paper forslx months for the death OF
an individual | was acquainted with, but
rs yet not a single soul I care about has
dropped or You win please havo my
namo erased"
How IT LEAKED ouT.-Lllsls Jake:
ma, does pa kss you because no loves
you?" ITO be sure. sonny; why dld you
ask that question: Because, eueu hs
loves Bridget. too, for secn him kiss he.
MORN forty times las, Sunday when you
was to meeting Our informant didn's
stop I'LL pa got home.
l Az Asri-vEorrAniAS vnoix.-ono Of
our north country pitmen. who had turn
ed vegetarian, went a couriing to a plucly
lass In the cclliery village, and @popped
. the question"
"oh!" said she. go along with youl-
Do you think I'm going to be ilesh ol
your flesh and you live on cabbagcs?-
No, indeed. don't belong to the rabbit
iamily."--Eegiish Pepper.
: A GALLANT DyER.-A lady being Ia
: want OF dyer was referred TO an excel
/; lent workman, and something OF awag IN
his llnc. Tho lady called and asked:
"Aro you the dyeing man?'
mo, ma'an. Pm living man, but !
+. will dye for YOU" promptly replied The
man Of many colors, putting the emrhasis
where II was needed.
The Pnoor.-"Did you say, air, thsl
you considered Mr.. Smith insane?" a>ke1
a lawyer Of witness In criminal cass
Al "ycs. sir. did"
4 upon what ground did ron hsss thi
infercncs?''